The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-10-03


In the larger Japanese cities many
shopEeepers have applied to a sign paint
er who has acquired that dangerous
thing, little knowledge CT English.
without drinking deep at the Pierian
spring. for a ''shingle' that shall express
70 the world in Western characters the
nature of their business. The assurance
of these sign painters is not matched by
their familiarity with English spelling,
construction, moods and lenses. and the
result IS often amusing in the extreme
For instance, one is amazed to see in
Toxic sign that boldly announces
A TAILOR CUT TO ORDER
Another one informs us
PHOTOGRAPHER EXECUTED HERE
"A halter in Kobe announces that he sells
GENERAL SORT STRAW HAT.
and another informs the public that he is IL
DEALER TILISHSTRAWHAT
WILL MAKE TO ORDER.
Some of the signs really seem 10 suggest
needed English words, like
BUTCHERY AND PROVISIONS.
Why not ''butchery?' Another tells us that
he deals i'll
SOFT GOODS.
He does not mean soft drinks" either. but
soft wooden goods. A baker tells us that
BAKETRY
Another sign which l daily passed for near
ly week told the world that within dwelt
THE INVENTOR OF KOBE,
though what he invented, or when, or why,
deponent saith not. merchant in Osaka
has hung out his shingle with superfuOus
articles, follows:
PATENT THE CHARCOAL PATENT
THE POCKET STOVE
The conjunctions are almost as difficult
for the average sign painter to master.
Consequently he sometimes tells the world
HOUSE SHIP AND PAINTER,
or that within there is for sale
SHOTTINGAN POWDER AND.
A glance at the rifles, shotguns and pow
der horns within makes the sign plain.
The Century.
1t was in Edinburgh, and she was
pretty and sweet and poetic, and he was
young and mischievous. They were sit
ting out on the veranda in the moon
light, and she grew ethereal. oh how
| love to sit out here in the moonlight"
she cooed: ito be famed by the languor
Gus perfumes of the roses and to be
Then he kissed her and she grew indig-
nant. How dare your She almost
sobbed. why, I'm a soft heir from the
South" he replied, contritely She didn't
say anything when he kissed her again.
London Tit-Bits.
The peril of the moment is the ''Small
Honors" men. When Artemus Ward
was in London he had the following con-
versation with the landlord OF the inn al
which he was staying:
rs the strange being an Americana"
HE is
"A general?'
No"
A colonel:'
No"
a major?"
Not major
"a captair?'
He is not
Not even that. hen-decisively-he
is not an American"
On the continent they now employ q
similar process to discover whether
visitor is an Englishman.
rs the stranger X. C. By
is he X. c. S. II"
No"
rs he X. C. I. E.?''
He is not"
is he X. c. V. OF"
No
rs he X: C. NJ. CO"
He is not
Not even X. c. NJ. G.. Then he is
certainly not an Engiishman. London
Truth.
Here is a Georgia boys composition
on the trouble in China: China is a
land of heathens that would ruther wor-
ship a wooden god that grins at you than
go to church an pay pew rent My pa
was a missionary in China. When the
Boxers commenced to box they knocked
l., al. 7
three fingers an brand new hymn book
with bookmark in it. Then he coined
home. He has still got 2 legs an 2 arms
left, though the Mission board told him
that he lost his head. He says home
missions take the ake."-Atlanta Con
Stif1finn