The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1900-03-17
Sweet Sixteen s A:
NmkmOQDm QMam6fg


was, I regret to say it, the Unknown
quantity, and / was. so for no other
reason than that 1 had got over my
earliest youth. while she was at the
halcyon age of pigtails. Her pig-tail was
plack frequently tied with a black rip,
bon, and matched her blue eyes beau
tifully. People say that such things
blue eyes and dark hair-are to be found
! In ireland by hundreds, but they say So
many things about Ireland. / have not
! been to Ireland, but do not believe It,
| 90 not believe that beauties grow on any
| particular soil, like prize turnips.
Orten l rallied at Fate for reducing me
10 an Unknown Quantity. Why, because
was supposed to have seen the world
having been in India for a few wears.
because l had brought back few tigers
| claws, purchased, for all she knew In
| Regent street; because l was a little
| older than these boys who lowered rourd
her, and had forgotten how to blush like
| them-Why should I be reduced to this
ABSURD position? After all, five years III
1nula 1oeS not make one a grandfather
and man may even have shot tigers
| without qualifying for the situation of
| sphinx. But Fate, rejoicing in irony, has
| ordained that to Is 26 shall be a mystery,
| separated irreconcilably by long years
! of experience and intolerable wisdom, for
| rs has seen life while 16 is learning de-
/
is that In another year-or two at most
| when the pig-tail shall have become a
coil on the top of the head-unknown
| quantities will cease to exist; X by the
| universal vanishing of age distinctions,
| Will be resolved into one more man, and
| from 20 10 100-no reasonable offer will
be refused
In the meanwhile we were friends
with difference. She tyrannized over the
| collegians when they gathered in her
train too sheepishly or deferred to them
| when they blusteringly laid their reputa-
lions as rowers or batsmen at her feet,
| and she drank in their comfortable ego
ism Our relations were not of the same
| simplicity. We spoke of tigers and other
| perplexing and Oriental subjects, in
which she displayed a constrained intel
| ltgence and | a fictitious interest. 1 am
| not sure even that 1 was not compelled
| to get up the religion of Buddha from
| dusty works of reference, and I know
| she scored on the. subject of Avatars. 1t
| was not so very long since I had stroked
| my college eight and my average for
| cricket in India. What does 1t matter?
| She could not understand that such sub
| jects were meat for a Travelled man, so
| that had no opportunity of mentioning
! laurels won. Seeing on what easy terms
| they would have placed us, I kept re-
| GREETING that l was so modest, but the
| fear l am quoting some philosopher-are
| Withered leaves that never were green.
| But nearest approach to mutual under
standing was when I ventured to tease
| her If she understood my jokes, which
| happened, I admit, when they were at
their poorest, we INDUCED in common
laughter. And laughter is one of the
| methods of solving X. If, on the other
| hand, they contained some bewildering
IatU ha tO
look the point, and we went on to pas
lures new.
One day-it was at the time when May
grows odorous among the bleaching lilacs,
when laburnums let raIl their yellow
rain in the sunlight, and the lapwing-
as am given to understand, although no
Ornithologist-takeS himself another crest
My Lady Of the Pig-tail brought out
divine sailor hat. Many were the COLI
legians who saw her home from school
and purchased boxes of chocolates to win
her grace. l also bought her chocolates,
| of, swear, a superior flavor; but, where
as, she accepted theirs Is votive offerings
with queenly condescension, mine ELECTED
an impusive gratitude, as though they
had been the tip of some elderly uncle.
Since then gTatitude-the emotional quid
| for the material Quo-has always, in my
| opinion, been least among the virtues. If
| had been her uncle I might have felt
differently. I suppose uncles do. But 1
| was not her uncle, nor did l wish to be.
The pseudo aruncular position is worse
| than that of the brother by compact. AS
an unknown quantity I writhed. She
understood enough Of to read disap-
pointment on my face, for she set about
| consoling me by stating that she wished
! for my opinion. To ask an old man for
his opinion, as If you really thought it
worth listening to (which, of course, you
| never do) is the surest way to his good
! graces. / was not an old man, and
| wondered If the sirens spoke with so al
Turing a lisp. We were sitting at the
tennis court, where many Of her col
legians were playing. gathered from
! her mysterious preface that several Of
the collegians had made dark requests
for gloves and flowers and such things
indicative of momentous intentions. She
desired my opinion upon them.
II want to know what you think Of Mr..
Tom Redington, she said DO you con-
thider him nice?"
Mr.. Tom Redingtop," I replied, SIS a
man of exquisitei taste and unimpeachable
good fortune" IS
! "Why?" she asked.
Because he has the felicity to attract
your attention"
mo; but seriously" she lisped. 1t was
somehow understood between US that
polysyllables denoted an absence of Sc
robustness.
well then said, "he bats, doesn't
he? or rows?"
Are you sure you're serious?" she said
Honor bright
And shining" I said solemnly.
'He,th got very good average so far
this season. she reflected, not taking me
into this athletic monologue.
The season is young yet 1 said hope
| fully. You should never count YOUR
chickens until you're sure they are not
! ducks"
But Mr.. Dick Walker is higher" she
went on, balancing merits, "only beth so
conceited about it,"
Pride cometh before a fall" I said.
though great deal depends on the
bowlers''
Then there's Mr.. Dean" she said.
thoughtfully; he brought me some choc-
What does Mr.. Dean do?" I asked.
Bird s-nest?"
'Of course not" she said laughing. He
rows, and he won thculling match the
other day
Deans hot man. I said
There are such lot of young men, u
she said, furrowing her brows, as Pene-
lope did, in adj probability, when she
considered the vast number of her suit
ors. Il -
wait few years" I suggested
There won't be so many then"
why not?" she asked.
It's kind iof political economy" ]
said vaguely. f'There'll want to be quite
as many. Very likely more But you
will only see one, He will have an ex.
ceedingly high, average, and you will
| 1No111 ,f.,Ir-