Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1900-02-24
THE GREEN-EYED MONSTER

Some months ago Mr.. Jobson received: In
the morning mail delivered at his house, q
letter addressed to him in a dainty femi-
nine hand. Mrs Jobson had gone to the
basement door to get the letters from the
postman, and she was somewhat puzzled
as to who Mr.. Jobson's feminine CORE
spondent could be. She did not know the
handwriting. 1t was that of none of her
female relatives nor of his. However she
handed the letter to him at the breakfast
table, simply asking, not in any particular
ly curious way:
who is it from?''
I'll know better as to, that after I've
opened it and seen the signature" replied
Mr.. Jobson, choppily.
Mrs. Jobson ran over her own letters
while Mr.. Jobson was reading the missive
addressed to him in the feminine handwrit-
ing, and when she looked up and across the
table at her spouse he was apparently suf-
fused in bushes, and there was quite an
amount of self-satisfied complaisancy in his
manner.
Anything Important" inquired Mrs. job
son.
''Oh. don't know" replied Mr.. Jobson,
leering at himself in the sideboard mirror
and twiddling with his fork
is 1t from anybody 1 know" inquired
Il think not" replied Mr. Jobson, adjust
ing his cravat and pulling down his cuffs
in a truly Lothario-like manner
business natter asked Mrs. Jobson
We'll, hardly that" answered Mr. Job
son, with another quite killing look at him
self in the sideboard glass.
Anything I'd be interested in?' inquired
Mrs. Jobson, not with any particular indi-
cation of excitement nor any evidence Of
pique.
Il wouldn't undertake to say as to that"
replied Mr. Jobson, rubbing the hair over
on 10 the bald spot on the top of his head,
and I.s smiling mysteriously to himself:
Its not in regard to the church fair, is
it?' asked Mrs. Jobson.
Anything but that replied Mr. Jobson,
Toying with his fork after the manner of a
t .biu Ju I'VE at stage supper. ANY
is your coffee strong enough?" asked
Mrs. Jobson, and Mr.. Jobson looked sig
naliy disappointed that she did not pursue
her inquiries further Mrs, Jobson was
however, saying to herself:
He's just aching to have me come out
and demand to know the contents of that
letter, and the name Of the writer, but III
Just do nothing of the sort-so there, now.
l would like to know the name of the i'm
pudent thing, but wouldn't give him the
satisfaction Of asking him outright for
worlds! AS If cared! HUH Moreover, I'll
see the letter anyhow-that is, if it's in his
coat pocket at bedtime tonight But 1
guess it's nothing very serious, else it
wouldn't be addressed to him right here at
his house. Now, just look at him, preening
tiiiiseil, anu imagining tnat l am already
insanely jealous! AS if l should ever be-
come Jealous of any living man, indeed"
Mr. Jobson pulled the letter out of lis
pocket, unfolded it, and read 1t with great
eiaporatlon, two or three times over and
the mysterious smile on his countenance
deepened each time that he perused it.
somewhat to his chagrin, as exhibited by
the frequent glances that he cast at her
out of the corners of his eyes, Mrs. Jobson
seemed to have quite forgotten about the
letter. and all of his ahems and other as
tentatious efforts to attract her attention
to 1t failed dismally. Mr. Jobson kissed Ter
quite amiably before starting for the office,
and still looked complaisanty mysterious
as he descended the steps
When Mr.. Jobson was at the dessert stage
of his dinner that evening he looked UP at
Mrs. JobSon and said:
Game near going out of your mind from
Jealousy this morning, didn't your"
jealousy" replied Mrs. Jobson, trying
to look as completely mystified as possible
Jealous of who? On account of WHAT
What do you
'Oh. saw your eyes flash, and thought
you were going to have an attack of apo
pexy.' said Mr.. Jobson. Jealousy is a
sorry business, Mrs JobSon-it's a feeling
that men are incapable of experiencing
their natures are much larger and broad
er. you know. Now, don't want you to go
on suffering acute misery over the COM
munication l received. addressed in a femi-
nine hand, this morning, and so I'll show
1t to you on condition."
Il have not the least desire in life to see
1t, said Mrs. Jobson. She had in fact
Already read it-when Mr.. Jobson had
changed his coat for his smoking jacket on
coming home from the office, before he had
thought to shift the letter to his smoking
jacket pocket
however, and for the second time she read
over a begging letter written by the female
secretary of the Society for the Raising of
Sponge Cake Fund for indignant infants,
inCr of hot
When l saw that you were SO terrifically
ana unWarrantedly Jealous" explained Mr..
Jobson, Il concluded to give you a little
lesson. and at the same time to instruct
you in the fimsineSS of circumstantial evil
dence I'd recommend you not to give vent
to any such manifestations of uncontrola-
BILE Jealousy in the future. Mrs. Jobson; it's
not pretty sight, and you'd find it mighty
wearing on the system"
When the pOstman delivered the first mail
on tuesday morning last there was let
ter for her addressed in a strong masculine
hand. Mr.. Jobson was right behind her
and she made an Intellectual effort to hide
the letter beneath her house jacket. But
MI Jobson's eagle eye had caught her in
the attempt.
who's that one FROM Mrs Jobson?" he
asked her in a sharp voice.
Which one?" inquired Mrs. Jobson. a
succession of well-defined bushes crossing
her face.
THAT letter addressed in a mans hand
writing that you just stuck under your
waist" said Mr.. Jobson, severely lets
just have look at that after you've read
it. If you please"
But it's from Mrs. Jobson started to
say, looking quite extraordinarily guilty,
however. and faltering in her speech.
III just take the trouble to ascertain
myself who it's from. madame" said Mr.
Jobson, "as soon as you've looked over It,
Pretty mysterious business, l should say
Why of all the nerve that 1 ever heard of,
this is"
And Mr. Jobson damned his hands into
his trousers pockets, ruffled up his hair
and clomped up and down the dining ROOM
Mrs. Jobson broke open the envelope has
tily read the lettec, returned 1t to the en-
ve.ope, and looked greatly confused. She
started to tear the missive up, but Mr. job
son was within two feet Of her in q stride
"Ah-ha!" said he, his eyes blazing
You'd tear it up, would you? You'd hide
the evidences of-nadame. I'll trouble you
to hand me that letter. and at once"
Mrs Jobson drew back
But I'd much rather not, and she
started to say.
THAT letter. instantly, Mrs. Jobsonv just
Ike Rawdon Crawley in the denouement
scene in Becky Sharp, his breath coming
and going stentoriously. why, of all the
outrageous"
''Well. I suppose I shall have to surren-
der it, said Mrs. Jobson, shrinkingly, and
then she handed over the letter to Mr.. job
son. 1t was from the correspondence clerk