The age-herald., 1900-10-14

Well, sir," said MT. Dooley, If theyse amy wan r-runnin' in this campaign but me frind Tiddy Rosenfelt, I'd like to know who 1t is. It isn't Mack, fir he wint away three weeks ago iavin' a note sayin' that he'd accip tn nommynation if twas of- tered him, an he ain't been heerd firm since. It ain't Bryan, fir he's vsitin tn tombs iy tn ancesthors iv tn party, an il he likes tn neighborhood he may buy place there. It an't Adly, fir athletic spoorts ar-re far fir m his line. Iris Tiddy alone that's r-runnin' an he ain't r-runnin, he's gallopin'
 windows intooced him to lave New York an pike out fir tn land iv tn prairie an tn mountain. where ye can use tn top iY ye'er voice without disturbin tn seen cry. He mounted his thrusty bronco an made fir South Dakota. South Dakota turned out as wan man an exchanged shots iv greetin with him. A guard iv welcome, two hundherd thousan' sthrong composed iv vethrans iv tn Trough riders met him at tn town limits an escorted him to tn public square, where he shook hands whiniver hands remained with tn survivors iv his career on tn plains. 'Ye won't recognize me-, says a man with a rubber leg an celluloid ear l seem to raymimber such iv yer linymints as has not gone out iv circylation,' says Tiddy, but l don't call ye'er name, he says. I, says tn la-ad, am Horrible Horace, tn Scoorg iv tn Wind R-river Valley, he says. Don't ye raymimber tn time he near kilt me in Snake Canyon durin' tn har-rd winter iv eighty-nine,' says he
 l have dim recollection" says Tiddy. IT raymimber r-right, 1 was Sthandin' at th' bar dhrinkin' pint iv sulphuric acid an r-readin a little fav-rite wurruk iv mine called Locke on tn Human Undher- Sldnuln, Whln in nhiick9d n me glasses, sayin that with tn r-rest iv my features they made me look like a pro- hSslonal diver just disappearin' into an angry horse, he says. 'Ye thin attackted me with vile language, coarse abuse, ex- cited oaths, cant book, a pair iv spurs, a pair iv chaps, a sombrero, a refliction on me gran father, brandin ir'n, a bowie knde, torty-four an a Winchester rifle,' he says I was loath to strike ye even thin, but whin, he says, ye passed an in sultin remark about tn value iv tn merit system, he says, me indignation overcome me- he says. wiped me glasses an handed thim to tn bartindeI, buttoned up me rough coat to protiCt me silk vest smiled ca'amly or as ca mly as I can, waved aside tn bullits with me left hand an made two motions with me r-right. Dye raymimber? I raymimber tn first says Horrible Horace. Well, thim was gr-reat times, says Tiddy. An I'm not changed in tn laste,' he says. --e pudpose In comin to ye'er mist he says, Is to t"row down, rope an brand tn dimmy- cratic party. fire ye with me?' he says. We ar-re,' says all tn survivors. An he goes among tnm inspctin' tn places where he hit thim, an thin he visits tn graveyard where he buried his dead, an so on to tn next town.
 He niver stops. In Wounded Knee he busts bronco that has kilt almost tn en- tire male population; busts 1t so har-rd twud dhraw baby cerredge without walk in tn occupant. He finds a poor ranch man whose punchers is off on a dhrunk, an he goes out an rounds UP thirty thousan head iv cattle in less thin an hour. Afther that he r-rides off to tn COW town, finds tn cowboys, takes their guns away firm thim, bates thim into subjicton an Swears thim all in mimbers iV tn Christyan Indeavor S'ciety. He discovers an or frind, whom he licked tn year he killed tn grizzly bear with tn rock, an his oP frind Is havin' throuble with a bouldher that's that's got in tn slooce. Tn boudher weighs four tons. 'Ye don't know how to deal with it, says Tiddy, an he shoves it out iv tn way with his foot.