Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1900-02-24
IT WOULDN'T WORK TWICE

u
There was q dazAd expression on the face
of the F street real estate man when a
friend dropped in On him at his Office the
| other afternoon. Beside him, on his desk.
was just-opened, ornate box Of exceed
| ingly dark CIGARS The cigar box itself
was Spanish all right. or Cuban, or some
thing. for there Was a very lansuishing
mermaid on the inside cover, and this mer-
maid wore a toreador hat and very fetch
| ing hoop earrings.
When the real estate mans friend entered
he looked around the room anxiously.
Say. is there anything burning around
here? Haven't got your rubbers accidental
ly under the stove have your he asked.
Nope. 1 guess not" replied the real es-
tate man. Il guess 1t must be this cigar
I'm smoking. Have one?'
No. thanks
Pretty vicious. isn't it? Tastes like a
mixture of hemp and dogweed, and I'm
afraid 1t smells like Kansas City. Say,
that's what I was dazed about when you
came in here-this box O. cigars"
Your regular brand are they2''
No. l just bought EN- from a man who
spends his life on the ocean wave and who
makes his home on the rolling deep. That
Is to say, he told me he did. He came in
here about fifteen minutes ago, with a
heavy rolling gait. a list to starboard, and
smelling most violently of whisky, to be
sure and he Immediately began to soften
me up and tell me what d sport looked to
be. Then he pulled a couple O. cigars out
Of his pocket and offered me one. Said he
had got EN- in Cuba. He had the Cuban
lingo down all right, and he threw in sew
eral picturesque ones about shivering his
timbers and splicing his main braces, and
things like that and said l to myself, Here
is a characteristic deep-sea, heavy-weather
man; how interesting he ISL So 1 lit the
cigar he had given me, put my feet upon
my desk, and leaned back to enjoy myself
studying him. Well that cigar was a won
der. Never had smoke like it since I was
born; 1t was cigar fit for king.
This is a great smoke said I to my
heavy-weather visitor.
Think SOP he asked got box of
'em here with me-a hundred, blast me
eyes and shovel me out O. the maintop! I
smuggled 'em on me ship when 1 came
from Cubey the last time The tobacco
that's in EN- Is from the patch o ground in
Aba1o-I think that's what he called it
where the Prince O. Wales cigars is
growed. One O. them Cubians stole me a
thousan' an sold 'em to me FIR little r
nothin'. Jes happen to have a hundred of
EN- along wit me today, sizzle me mizzen
ridge rope an chuck me through tn engine
room hatch! Now, I'm down here broke,
wit not tn price of a ride to Brooklyn,
Were l want to ship over
WhatH you take for that box Of
cigars? 1 asked him
We'll. 1 finally got 'em for SIS, but he
looked awful sad over 1t, did that deep
water man. and I almost fancied he wiped
away a tear when he took my $15 and had
to hand me the box of cigars. However,
he went right away then. Say, smoke one
of EN- for me, won't you, old MANI"
We'll. 1 guess nay" was the reply.
Say, do they taste as bad as they smell?'
This is their first trip out Of Connecti-
cut. l fear. They taste like a Scotch dish
once took mouthful of at a st. Andrew 5
banquet..haggis Only the cigars are
worse. Say, take EN- along when you go,
will you. and give 'em to your janitor?"
No, Stree, :! want to preserve that jani-
tors good opinion was the reply. Then
the friend of the real estate man moved
off. When he got to his own office, about
five doors down, a hairy-pawed proposition
who reeked of the barrel house product
was sitting on the edge of his desk.
well. my man, what is it?" asked the
proprietor of the Office.
why, curl me bloomin' sky-s'ls," began
the weather-beaten proposition, 81 just
fix up some kind O. a deal wit a box o.
smuggled seegars that 1 brought along
with me from Cubey wen come up in me
last ship
"Oh, yes" said the proprietor of the
office. Got any samples of your cigars?'
The weather-beaten citizen pulled a
couple from his pocket, which the proprie-
tor of the office Immediately saw were the
his desk. Then he took the smuggler from
Cubey by the scruff of the neck and threw
him down stairs.
II have only just come from the office of
a friend of mine you swindledr' he ex-
planned as he firmly pushed the weather
beaten Cuban smuggler down the front
steps.
Oats de worst o. graftin' in a small
burg, the heavy-weather-n man was
heard to mutter to himself as he picked
up his hat and his box of fierce cigars
thrown after him. de whole bunch knows
each other. an 1t on'y takes 'em couple
o minutes t git next"