davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
SPANISH GUN IN LINCOLN PARK, CHICAGO.

then almost unconsciousiy they move
together slowly to seat under a near
by tree and there fight their wars over
again, each recounting his experiences,
hair-breadth escapes and final return to
the pursuits of peace. 1t was this big
gun that revived their memories and
started the veterans to the shade of a
tree. That they were unacquainted be-
fore this was no matter, for they were
bound by ties of comradeship, and the
| first connection of the great cannon
with events of third of century ago
was enough. No formal Introduction
was needed. nor did it matter in the
least if one had worn the blue and the
other the gray. 1t was the comrade-
ship which battlefields create and it
needed only this lone trophy gun to
start Its fires aglow.
Perhaps the most interesting visitors
Of the big gun are children. 1t is no.
ticed that they feel as though they
were in the presence of something
dreadful, and the four mortars hard
by, each weighing more than 1900
pounds and capable of throwing shell
of more than 1000 pounds weight, only
increases the awe of the youngsters.
Children nearly always talk in a low
voice while there and move about in
pairs or in groups. They seem to catch
the meaning-of the gun and mortars and
what they were made for. This cam
non Is about as awe-inspiring to chill
dren as graveyard" said,a bystander
as little group walked around the
gun, their eyes wide open.
There Is a class of people who visit
the mortars and the big gun and find
just the kind of inspiration they want.
They are young men Who are ambitious
to be soldiers and "face the cannon's
mouth" Their Imagination is whetted
until they can see themselves sweeping
across fields and charging over hills,
and the war machinery there arouses
all the martial spirit in them. They
amuse veterans of the battlefield, but
for all that ''the big gun and the mon
ster mortars teach them a lesson that
is altogether wholesome" as an old
soldier of many campaigns put 1t.
Then there are the peace-at-any price
visitor. The gun and the mortars to
him are fiends, fiends from the under
world incarnated in life-destroyfng
agencies agencies that destroy in an
ger. "That gun is devil in steel, and
its only business in the world is to deal
leath and destruction" said he to the
group he was with. and he worked HIM
self into frenzy of anger over the av-
fulness of sentiments other than those
of peace and goodwill toward men.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Picking Pockets with Toes,

The Gauchos, or dwellers in the ex-
tensive plains of Buenos Ayres, are
marvelously dexterous with both hands
and feet. Many Of them have acquired
through long practice such skill In
using their toes as if they were fingers
that they can fling the lasso and even
pick pockets with them. Some time
ago a Frenchman who was fishing In
one Of the rivers of Buenos Ayres was
warned to be on his guard against the
light-fingered natives. He forthwith
kept yigilant watch on his compan-
ions, but nevertheless one day when his
attention was closely ffveted on his
float willy Gaucho drew near and deli
.cately inserting his foot, extracted the
Frenchman's hooks and other valua-
bles from his Boston Tran
script.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28

tant-general in the volunteer service
and he is now attached 10 the staff OF
Gen. Miles. He is man of ability and
great unpretentiousness
A few. days before he .donned his uni
form he went over to Fort McHenry
Baltimore on official business, A Wal
department clerk went along with him
When the two men arrived at Fort Nc.
Henry, the new captain pointed to q
long shell road that runs through the
post.
DO you see that roadY asked the
captain. Yes
Wen, ! made that whole road my
self. 1t was as tough job as l ever
performed, and as bitter period, but
it did me heap of good l was sery-
ing with an artillery regiment. part of
which was stationed here, and one
night when | was on guard the officer
of the day crept up on me unawares
and found me sitting down on pile of
gunny sacks. neglecting my post. got
a general court-martial for neglect of
duty OF post. and was sentenced to six
months in the guardhouse. MY SEN
tence tickled the old provost sergeant
nightly, for he was in need of steady
prisoner 70 build that road. built 1t,
and crunched many million oyster
shells building it. never find myself
feeling chesty and high-and-mighty,
and all that sort of thing, that don't
shut my eyes and think of this shell
road over in Fort McHeury. Wash
ington Star.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Bad Spelling.

To spell badly is no longer consid-
cred particularly illiterate-that is to
say, it does not betoken a want of ed
ucation. An eminent lawyer, who is
considered one of the most "brainy"
men of his time, said recently that un-
til he was married he had always SPELL
ed husband with an after the u, and
a noted physician when taking his ex-
aminations at the medical college
tripped up OH medicine" Another
funny case was that of a young man
who, having been graduated with the.
highest honors from his university, sent
out cards, which he had written per-
sonally, saying that he had formed a
"buisiness" partnership with Mr.. So
and-So. The fact of the matter is that
spelling is SO neglected in the curri-
culum of schools and colleges nova
days that it is hit-or-miss kind of ac-
complishment. Those who have ac-
curacy and "ear" remember the vari-
Gus combinations, and others fail utter
ly to retain the impression made while
reading or studying, the provision made
in modern boys schools and colleges to
train the sense of sound and it's express
sion being of little account.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
WHAT A DINNER REPRESENTS.
Growth of the Different yiands In
wolves an Outlay of $5OO,OOO,OOO.

Growth of the Different yiands In.
wolves an Outlay of $5OO,OOO,OOO.
Recently a man who is fond of arith.
metic made up his mind that he would
find out how much a dinner really cost
He first ascertained that the dinner he
was eating cost 10 cents, presumably
He contradicted this and then made
out the following statement about the
cost of that dinner.
The pepper, he said, came from TO-
600 miles away. 1t grew ON a bush
eight feet high, which must have had
a growth of at least five years. The
pepper was picked green; it had to be
dried in the sun, and this meant en-
ploying women. 1t took one ship and
1000 miles of railroad to bring the pep
per to the United States.
The -four of which the bread was
made came from Dakota; some one
owned the land, and that meant the in
vesting of capital, and he had also to
pay wages to workingmen. The -four
had to be ground, and the building of
the mill and the plant, or machinery,
meant more money invested. The mill
ers had to be paid, coopers had to be
paid for making the barrels, and, of
course, the wood of which the barrels
were made had to be cut and sawed
and shaped, and this meant the EN-
ployment of more men. Then the -four
had to be shipped over the railroad and
handled again by cartmen before it
came into the house.
The tea on the table came from China
and the coffee from South America. The,
Goldfish had to be brought from Maine.
Men had to be employed to catch the
fish; other men and women were en-
ployed in drying, packing and boxing
it, and 1t, too. had to make a long rail
road journey.
The salt came from the Indian reser-
vation in the northwestern part of
New York State. The spices in the
cake came from the spice islands in the
Indian archipelago. The canned peaches
came from California, and they, too.
represented the employment of capital
and labor. The little dinner represent
ed, directly or indirectly, the employ
ment of $5OO,OOO,0OO of capital and s.
100000 men.-Memphis Commercial
Appeal,
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28

feats-is the Chenab Irrigation Canal
In the Northwest provinces of India.
Its breadth is 200 feet, with main
channel some 450 miles long, while the
principal branches have an aggregate
length of 1000 miles, and the village
branches will extend, when completed.
some 4.000 miles additional. But, apart
from irrigation, the longest canal in the
world is that which extends from the
frontier of China to ST. Petersburg.
and is 4.472 miles in length. The Ben
gal Canal, connecting with the River
Ganges, is 300 miles long, and in all
India there are $4,000 miles of canals.
irrigating 100000 of acres.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
TOLD OVER A WAR TROPHY.
Public Interest Shown in Spanish Gun
at Lincoln Park, Chicago,

Public Interest Shown in Spanish Gun
at Lincoln Park, Chicago.
The Spanish trophy gun, the Maria
Teresa, in Lincoln Park, Chicago, con-
tinues to be an attraction to citizens
and strangers. The gun itself is merely
an ordinary modern engine of war,
such as are employed in warship arma-
ment, but the association of the Maria
Teresa with the naval battle off Santi-
ago in July, 1898, and its mute story
of the prowess and skill of the Amer
lean navy gives the gun sort of pres
tige which it otherwise would not have
And not only that, but 1t tells for itself
and for Spain that Spanish ordnance
is far from being medieval in pattern.
strength or projectile-throwing power.
mounting and equipment compares ia
vorably with the latest improved heavy
artillery of the nations.
But it is not so much the gun Itself
as the crowds that gather about it that
interests the observer of men and
things, says the Chicago Chronicle 1t
Is the variety of facial expressions
which the monster cannon causes that
makes the study. 1t seems to be mans
nature to enjoy whatever stirs his mar
tial spirit, and Maria Teresa exerts a
powerful influence in that direction and
also in refreshing the memory of events
of war that transpired long ago.
1t Is quite common to see two or
three gray-haired men get into a con-
versation about the big gun, when one
will recite an incident of the civil war
In which heavy ordnance played con-
spicuous part. Then another remem-
bers incidents of his soldier days, and
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
"Mrs. Wales and Daughters !,

When in the country the Princess of
Wales delights in making little expe-
dluons incognito. An amusing and
true story has just leaked out about one
or these lmpromptu excursions at Sand
fingham. Her royal highness, with the
two princesses, had driven long dis
lance from home in her fayorite pony
cart, and as lunch drew near they were
glad to put up at a picturesque village
Inn. The landlord had his suspicious
as to who his guests were, and after
lunch had been served brought the Wis
itors, book. Whereupen the princess.
not to be outdone, made the following
entry: Mrs. Wales and two daugh-
ters''
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Rsg3ss3sa26SSaass22sasaG
3 ~ CONFIDENCB.lG K K S S
22sa3%R1saA1@5

sent him a para graph from an account
Of cousins wedding, and'-the color
increased, then quickly subsided-
knowing Jonathan so welI l wished,
if possible, to see him before the clip
ping reached him. And-you see,
knew you also knew him we'll" Her
lips closed tightly for a second, then
curved into a smile. Two great tears
started from beneath the dropping
lashes, but were quickly intercepted.
1 looked toward the place where jon
athan lay. screen was between him
and the visitor, and only his soft res
pfration betrayed his presence.
turned to Miss Conover.
Jonathan loves you,'' 1 said. "Do
you love him?' Her eyes flashed with
a womanly luster, but again her lips
were firm. For if you do" 1 exclaim-
ed, pulling aside the screen with a sin
gle swift movement, "he is here"
"Jonathan.'
Then as left the room looked back
and saw her kneeling at his side
Brooklyn Standard Union.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Dream of a Volunteer,

When come home from the Philippines
I want no speeches made,
No jeweled sword nor loving cup,
No banquet nor parade;
But just table set for two,
A good, old-fashioned feast,
With fiaky shortcake, light and white
Two dozen at the least.
When 1 come home from the Philippines
want some peach preserves;
A sprinkled custard pie
Would soothe my shattered nerves
And don't forget the apple sauce,
Nor hot molasses cake,
With lots of ginger in it, too,
Like mother used to make.
When come home from the Philippines
want homemade meal;
The kind that leaves no after taste
Oftsmoke and FIRE and STEEL
So have it ready, with my chair
Just where it used to be,
And I'll hang up my army hat
And sit right down to tea.
-Leslie's Weekly.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
HIPPoPoTAMI DISAPPEARING.

The Last One in Natal Has Been
Slaughtered.
Ihe last hippopotamus has been
slaughtered in Natal. All the larger
and more curious creatures are disap-
pearing so fast that this will be a mo-
notonous world, at any rate for natur-
ahsts, in another century. Not so long
ago the hippopotamus haunted the
rivers Of Cape Colony and Natal. and
Lake cow bacon" as the salted layer
of meat underlying the hide is called.
was favorite dish, but now this huge
creature has disappeared from both
countries. The hunter has been its en-
emy for many century, but the rifle
is far more deadly weapon than the
assegai.
The animal had an appetite proper
tional to it's bulk and can accommodate
great deal of vegetable produce. Be-
sides this, it is wasteful feeder.
tramping down and tearing up much
more than it consumes, and it prefers
cultivated plants to wild vegetation.
That has proved it's doom in Natal.
One herd was left at Seacow lake. n
NOetoS AuSooA hCdl anu WAS
protected by the government. 1t con-
sisted of parents and family of five.
Unfortunately these, like young people
all the world over, loved "sweeties,"
and made nocturnal raids on the neigh
boring sugar cane plantations. The
owners petitioned the government, a
warrant of execution was granted and
the parental bull, who must have been
nearly 80 years old, was the last to fall,
and will henceforth be only an "ex-
hibit'' at the Durham museum.
So the strange creatures of the earth
disappear before the white man, the
great destroyer. The hippopotamus,,
the elephant, and the giraffe, to speak
only of Africa, with many kinds of
antelope, are rapidly diminishing in
numbers.-London Standard.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
KILLED HIS SISTER IN FUN.
Minister Ransom Was Absent Minded
and Had to Be Aroused.

/ Minister Ransom Was Absent Minded
and Had to BE Aroused.
/ Former Minister to Mexico Ransom
! is very absent-minded. After the Min
| lister left the cloakroom of the House
one of the members said:
did you ever talk to the Minister
when bis mind has been occupied with
business?" and, without waiting for a
reply, the member continued: II did
met him soon after his return from
Mexico, and after we shook hands he
said:
How is your sister, Frank?
She lis well,' said.
"The Minister'S mind then returned
then he said:
How is your sister, Frank? and,
as before, l replied that she was well.
Five minutes later he raised his eyes
from some papers and remarked:
Oh, Frank, how is your sister?' I
thought the conversation was becoming
rather monotonous, and to change it I
answered that she was very ILL.,
Bless me! you don't say so! am
sorry to hear it, Frank
He turned to his papers again for
another five minutes, and hang me if
he didn't turn around and say:
Frank, how is your sister?' At
first I thought he was guying me, but,
looking at him sharply, realized that
he had forgotten the conversation, and
answered sadly, She is dead
Why man, you don't mean it!' he
exclaimed, jumping from his seat, and
extending his hand in most sympa-
thetic manner, adding: That is dread
full. When did it happen? Tell me all
about it,
Why replied, 7 killed her just
now. When came in your office 1 told
you she was well twice; then told you
she was very i'll and that didn't i'm
press you. So, for your benefit, have
just killed her.
The old man looked at me for mo-
ment and then replied:
You must pardon me, Frank. I
was thinking about these papers,
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Moving Stairways.

Two types of moving stairways for
the Manhattan Elevated stations in
New York City are to be put on trial
shortly. One is ramp consisting of
an endless rubber band running over
drums. In the other type regular steps
will take the place of the nearly
smooth incline, SO that a passenger al
ways stands on a level surface.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
The roman Monte, tia Pfet.

The most lenient pawnbroker's shop
in the world is said to be the Monta da
Pieta, at Rome, which has existed ever
since 1885. 1t loans from So to $5 upon
good security without demanding In
terest; but 2 per cent per annum .is
charged upon all greater sums.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Ordering by the Card,

Diner Ito restaurant waiter)-What
have you got for dinner?
Waiter-Roast beeffricassedchicken
stewediambhashbak pota.
toes college puddingmilkteaandcoffee.
Dinner-Giye me the third, fourth,
fifth, sixth, eighteenth and nineteenth
syllables.-Tit-Bits.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
A Curious Bird.

The kiwi halls from New Zealand,
and is rare bird. 1t is perfectly wing
less, and not sign of hair or feathers
protects the eyes. This gives the kiwi
comical look. 1t is almost wholly
nocturnal in its habits. Like the owl
of the north the setting of the sun
means the beginning of life to them.
Then they hop about like rabbits. They
are really the clowns of the fowl world.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28

Friend Everybody says the baby
looks like you, doesn't that please you?
Mr.. Newpop-Oh, don't know; but |
tell you what, Pm glad nobody thinks
Of saying | look like the baby.-Stand
ara and Times
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Not Surprised.

"Yes," said the man with the bored
expression, "I'll admit the truth of ev-
cry word you say about the weather
being oppressively hot. But don't see
the use of making it topic of con-
yersation."
Why, 1T is such remarkable weather
that l couldn't help mentioning it,
There is point on which beg to
disagree with you. 1t is not remark
able weather. l have never in all my
life known an August when it was not
oppressively t."-Washington Star.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
New Cure for Lockiaw,

DR.. Roux, of the Pasteur Institute.
announces the discovery of an efficient
cure for lockjaw. The antitetanic serum
used in Germany would not work till
DR.. Roux hit on the plan of injecting
it into the brain under the membranes.
His plan has been tried with complete
success on a man,
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28

II woman wants to work. the trem-
ulo stops on her husband, she should
put on her prettiest dress when she
does it. Nothing spoils the effect of
tears quicker than soiled wrapper.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Larger the Better.

The wrasses, thick-lipped fish found
near rocky shores. differ from most
other fish in that the larger they are
the better they are adapted for food
They grow to 80 pounds.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Uaefu1.

Fair painter-I hope you don't mind
my sketching in your field?
Farmer-Lord, no, missile! You keep
the birds off the peas bettern a. ordin-
ary scarecrow.-Tit-Bit
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Too True.

"Youngling is going to marry the
widow HenDeck."
"Why, she's twice as old as he is''
ooh, WE'LL he'll age fast enough after
the wedding. Brooklyn Life.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
A One-Man Road.

A Washington man who put In ten
ears of soldering in the regular army
{ the United States was recently ap-
fnted captain and assistant adju-
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Not a Curve for eli Miles.

The longest stretch Of railway with
out a curve is 211 miles, from Buenos
Ayres to the foot of the Andes, ON the
new Argentine Pacific Railway.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
None to Be Marie

Tess-Were there any marrying men
down at the shore?
Jess-Yes; it was awfully aggrava-
ting.
ess-Aggravating?
Jess-Yes; there were four ministers
and two justices of the peace there
Philadelphia Press.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Euthusiastic Photopranb.r

Fair Ones Father-Why did You
bring that kodak with you?
Poor Lover-That might catch your
expression of astonishment when ask
ed you for your daughters hand.-FIie
gende Blaetter.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Not Headanarfer.

what did her father say?''
"He said he couldn't understand WHY
l came to him-all his property was in
his wife's name. Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Prodixa1,s Choice.

"Well, dad" cried the prodigal son,
1ippantly, wouldn't you better go out
and kill the fatted calf now?'
"Yes, l guess 1 would" returned the
old man slowly. Zone calf is enough
to keep at time. ."ZHarper's Bazaar.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
A HorseIess Carriage.
Right.

School Teacher-What little boy can
tell me where is the home of the swal-
low?
Bobby Kin, please.
School Well, Bobby?
Bobby-The home of the swallow is
the Bits.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Odd Numbers.

The Siamese have great horror of
odd numbers, and were never known to
put five, seven, nine or eleven windows
in house or temple.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
So1id.

Eyes, l ate the cake she baked. To
make myself solid, you known
Did you succeed?"
"In a sense. 1 couldn't feel any SOL
ider If l had eaten brickbats and ce-
ment."-Detroit Journal,
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
A Hahitof His.

"Si," yelled the neighbor from the
road, your wife has jist run off with
Bill Johnson
''She hez, hez she?" answered the
farmer in the field; "wall, Bill aIlays
wuz a-borrerin' trouble. Git ap therer'
indianapolis Press.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28

Mother-Why don't you go out, VIII
lie, and play with Sammy Jones?
Willie-I played with Sammy Jones
yesterday, and 1 don't s'pose he's well
enough yet to get out.-Inter Ocean.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Drop Too Much.

Hoax-What made the elevator fall? !?
Joax-The elevator man took drop
too much.-Philadelphi Record.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
ReasonahIe.

The Father-Look here, my boy, you
told me you would need only $500 for
your college term, and now you want
$500 more.
The Son-But this is for the things I
don't need.-Life.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
Good Alarm Clock.

Employer congratulate you on that
new baby of yours, Higgins.
Higgins-Thank you, sir.
Employer-And l have no doubt that
hereafter you will be walked up early
enough mornings to get to the office
every day on time.-Somerville Journal
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-09-28
His FIrst CeIebration,

"This month l celebrate my twenty
fourth birthday
THAT'S odd-so do I.''
sBut l celebrate mine for the first
time."-Heitere Welt.