The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1900-01-10
HADAKICK TO MAKE.
AND He MADE IT RIGHT TO The HEAD
or THE FIRM.


on that style suppose we say double
two single nine and get il exactly right
Hellol Is that Spotcash s. Co. s?'
Eyes. responded the voice at the
other end Of the wire
''Is Mr.. Spotcash inT"
''Is it something importantf he is
much occupied
$50 am l. Yes; lisa matter Of some
importance and 1 want to talk to Mr..
Spotcash personally. Yes; IN hold tae
wire-that is. III hold the phone
''Helloi" snapped somebody at this
juncture.
"Hellol Is that Mr. Spotcashf
''Yes. Who is itl"
''You are the head Of the firm Of
Spotcash & Co. are you notT
''Yes, was the impatient answer.
'What do you want7 VITO are youT'
Civilians, 1895 Pumperniclel
street. want to enter a complaint.
what about 2"
Il bought an icebox at your store a
few days ago. and
''Call up the household goods depart
ment. confoUnd youi have no time to
spare 70 look after such things.
You We got as much time, perhaps.
as / have. haven't any complaint 10
make 10 the household goods depart
ment. The head Of the firm is the man
want to talk to. l bought an icebOx
at your store a few days ago for $16.75-
| might have got it cheaper somewhere
else. but that isn't the point Having
bought it and paid for it, l had right
to expect it to be delivered within
reasonable time and in fair condition.
II didn't come for four days, and when
it did come -
Say you. employ men to hear
complaints Of this kind
Il have no use for them You're the
responsible man Of the house The sys-
tenn is yours. If it doesn't work smooth
". il is your fault When that icebOx
came four days after purchase. one Of
the cast0rs was missing, the varnish
was scraped off the outside surface in
more than dozen places. and it looked
as if it had gone through hard season
at a cheap boarding hOuse" -
If there's anything wrong with it, -
can't t2ke up my time
Stand a little farther away from
the phone Mr. Spotcash. Your voice
sounds as If you had your mouth full
Of mashed potatoes -
''Who the devil are your"
II think gave You my name and
address-Gwilliams 1895 Pumpernickel
street. next door to Lazarus J. Spill
horn. You don't know me from a
stuffed alligator. but you ,lay have
heard Of Spillhorn. Don't you allow
yourself 70 get hot, Mr.. Spo tcash, over
an iceh0x The incongruity Of such a
thing ought to be apparent even to the
head of an OveTgrown junkshop''-
"If you were here. sir. should kick
you out Of my Office
You would probably need some help.
If that icebox had simply been defaced
a little : shouldnt have made any fuss
about It. but the stupid ass you sent 70
deliver it,
Haven't You sense enough, you in
fernal idiOA 70 know that ] don't look
personally after the little details Of
business amounting TO millions Of dol
lars a year.
IF you don't grasp every detail Of
that business yop Cheap John notion
peddler in Z gilt binding. you are not
fit to be the boss Of It Don't try to
crawl ont of the responsibility by
throwing the blame on some boy. If
that icebox had simply been defaced a
little, l repeat. / shouldn't have made
any fuss about It, but the fellow you
sent TO deliver it didn't have any more
sense than to tumble il on the side
walk
Bring it back blank youn-
"Look here, Spotcash, that won't do,
You know. You are not allowed 70 talk
in that style over the telephone. Exer-
else a little common sense, SpOtcash.
You know it isn't my place to bring
that icebox back The proper thing to
do. yOu thirty-third degree haberdasher
and toy vendor. IS to send me a new
icebox and take the damaged one
back -
"Yol blan,, fool do you think you
can tell me-
Again let me tell you. Spotcash.
not 10 use such language over the tele-
phone. Some remote ancestor of yours
may possibly have been a gentleman.
Try TO emulate him. Spotcash. IL the
meantime please accept tie assurances
Of my distinguished con liberation. and
the iceboz VIII remain in my dwelling
subject to your order. II it is replaced
properly ana within d reasonable time.
you viii not hear from me again. IL it
isn't. | shall call you up Spotcash. per-
Ionally a dozen times day through I'll
The public telephones in town. ] have
not the patience to call at your store 20
make the complaint. Your system %
making exchanges is too complicated.
and | believe in going to headquarters
with all kicks anyhow. Never allow
yourself to think Spotcash. that you
are too big "a man to listen to a com
plaint from your meanest customer. I
think that's all Good morning. Spot
cash Chicago Tribune.