Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1900-09-23

continued the speaker after. pausing
for breath. DE time has agTove to
nominate our candidate fur de presi-
dency. (Sinister silenee) ] hev BEEN
asked to take de nominashun, but hev
declined on de ground dat Brudder
Gardner was de man fur de place. tEn~
thusiastic cheers for Brother Gardnerl
Up to an hour ago hey used my in
fiuence 20 make him take 1t. but when
| learned he had sore heel. dat de-
later bugs had attacked his garden
patch,~dat his ole woman had a bile ON
her neck and his dog had run away and
| saw dat he was out of de race and dat
someone else must sacrifice, hisself.
eNhoops. yells and confusion lasting
five minutes.) Who am de man? Who
will take,de emblem OF de Postum party,
in his hand and jump into de hreachr
Oar am only one man in dis kentryl
and | air dat man. Yes, my fr'en So
The speaker got no further. Two huns
bred men rose up and howled and shrleked
and threw cucumbers and tomatoes and
potatoes at him.. and as he retired undes
the bombardment he was seized by EldeE
Toots and Waytiown Bebee and booted
out of the side door. There was danger
Tor time that the hall would be wrecks
ed. but at length Brother Gardner caina
forward and restored order and then in%
PRODUCED Colonel Upset Jones The mazr
was as tan aud thin as a seven-foot lath.
but his smile was like that OF a red cord
water melon, and the crowd decided to
let him go on.
Guild patriots of America" he beganI
as he bowed seven times in seven differs
ent directions sit am needless TO say dat
1 am astonished and overwhelmed by de
mighty assurance of the speaker who has
just been kicked off de platform. (Ap-s
plause). Did any one eber hear oh sichS
cheek and egotism? Did de hydra head on
political vilatny eber show itself wild sich
consistent ponderosity? tGroans). / ali
most doubted my own eyes and ears. Doesh
dis Pessum party want a candidate fors
president? Yes. yes Brother Gardnerg'G
No. my frien's, II does not. Should we puBl
up candidate we would not come .widlns
a million miles OBJ bein' 'leeted. He would
not be a straw IN a hurricane. Wed sims
ply go s. or S. expense fur muffin. (Shoutas
of surprise and anger) hev arrove yerel
from Souf Caroliny to aid dis party 10 do
de right thing. and I'll tell you what do
right thing am. We must go ober to do
white man. Curious shout and yells) Z
air authorized by acknowledgements ms
dividual to say dat IL we win drap all dis.
possum bizness and pull fur one Of das
nashunai parties he win pay US SIS cashe
down and put up money fur do biggesk
cake walk cher heard OF in America. ~
air my advice 10 o.
But the advice was not given The
whole hall was in an uproar and score
of men climbed upon the stage and played
ball with the carcass OF Upset Jonos forl
long Ave minutes. The band played.
and Brother Gardner came forward anG
called for order but when order finally
came wreck and ruin were 10 be seen on
every hand. and Upset lay on pile Of
sand in the alley. That the Posannl party
had been thrown down again was realized
by all and that the sacred Magma Charta
the grave OF Washington and the tsrinci-
pies Of Jefferson had been knocked into q
cooked hat was patent TO the duliest mind
No man on earth except Brother GardneH
could have brought silence and saved Par.
adise hall from being RACED to its founda-
ton.
8y countrymen," he said. when hfs
voice could make itself heard, Il started
out to organize dis Postum party under
de belief dat de black man was an unaeif-
ish patriot who was willin' to make sacri-
fees fur de gineral good OBJ his race.
From what l hab seen and heard up to
date II pears 10 me dat he amt no differs
ent from de white man 'cept in color, and
| reckon we'd better break dis meetin' in
two an go home and think II ober.''
There were wells screams and cheers ase
he retired. and as the crowd slrged QUE
It tipped over the stove. smashed tho
lamps and broke the backs of hundred
chairs.