The Pacific commercial advertiser., 1900-12-18
At THE BAR
Of JUSTICE
Pleas of Offenders II
Police Court.
MANY CASES ARE HEARl
A Man Named Terrible Failed T,
Responsibilities Words Of
Judge Wilcox.

Yesterdays Police Court calendar
was buster even for q Monday
morning. and was made up of as choice
a collection OF wronEdoers as ever
qualified for the interior Of Oahu's bas-
tilie
| .'Terrible!" shouted Clerk Of the
Court See.
Very bad" murmured Attorney
Strauss.
| "Terrible." again yelled See.
Awful" exclaimed Lawyer Hankey.
"Terrible." for the third time roareo
the clerk.
| Positively horrible" muttered the
Judge.
mo answer said See.
Bail forfeited pronounced His
Honor and then the occupants of the
.ourt room tumbled to the joke.
Sam and Dick, brothers In beer paio
tWo dollars and costs.
| Skunk and Roach. whose affections
waver at times between skillfuliy con-
structed jags and sanguinary profani-
", were taxed two dollars and costs
| On the former count. his Honor drop
| ped a hint to SKUNK that il would cos :.
| aim more the next time he did It. bu>
refrained from quoting the figure.
Larsen. johnson, knuusen and Jor-
gensen were asked to plead to charges
II excessive imbibing-
| Guilty or not guilty.? querled the
Magistrate.
.Ay tank So" came the reply.
Tank is the word that fits the
case" reflected His Honor as he called
lor contributions to good cause.
! Sweet" Emaia, effectively clad In
a straw wberry-hued holoku and many
tears, said that she wasn't drunk but
chat her husband was.
why, l went right to the policeman
and / said, Smell my breath" pleaded
| Sweetness"
Did you smell liquor?" asked Judge
Wilcox Of the officer.
II did," was his reply.
+ What did 1t smell lilSe?" queried the
curious Judge.
.Swipes," replied the "cop" without
a moments hesitation.
You had been drinking swipes your
self and smelled your own breath;
hats what's the matter" interpolated
he indignant beauty.
Your record is kind Of against you. +"
| aid the Judge, but / don't think
you're drunk all the time. will let
iou go this time, but you must try
| md keep your temper You blonde
haired women are hard to stop when
you get started" feelingly). Emalia s
nirsute adornment is black with here
and there carmine thread to- relieve
The general sombreness.
Officer Aubrey next played star part
| with what the theatrical critic would
| .all easy grace. He swore to arrest
| ng a man for drunkenness and all but
! lad him convicted when defendant. a
| japanese, expressed desire to make b
| statement.
i In the statement he talked intelli-
| Gently of fish ponds, the sounding sea.
4 iat mullet and zone Kanaka," whom
l e said had taken him to the station,
4 house.
|. The court rubbed its eyes IN amaze
i nent- How could this thing be?
/ The trouble was that there We're two
! nen of the same name, Inouwe, in the
ILoils, and the policeman who sorts the
| black sheep had got the brands mix
ID. ALI JapS look alike to Aubrey and
he overlooked the discrepancy.
1t was all extremely embarrassing
particularly for Aubrey and his cherry
blossomed pets. -
The case against Inouwe No. was
lolle prosd, and if Inouwe No. had
"SaVeyed" he might have escaped on
technical grounds He was not wise
20 the game, however, and pleaded
guilty to being drunk.
TN have TO take your word for it, y
said His Honor, but the policeman
swore it was the other fellow" And he
also paid the price of ignorance
A native boy charged with riding a
bicyc.e without light was fined 81
and costs
1T would be weli,'' said His Honor
If the police would get after some of
these high-toned young men who work
in stores, wear high collars and think
themselves above arrest"
The law is no respecter of persons, -
virtuously remarked Chiliingworth.
Matt Howard, charged with assault
with deadly weapon, bobbed up as
usual and as usual the missing wit
ness for the prosecution was non est
THE state of affairs in this case has come
to be regarded in the light of an insti-
tuition, and everyone connected with
the matter would feel deeply hurt If
the mysterious and diligently search
ied Tor Mr.. Bailey should put in an
appearance.
The Deputy Sheriff made the same
old talk about the "diligent search, "
aud Attorney Strauss turned the
lrfehteous Indignation tap on, full
force.
'Yhis case is likely to go on till the
tseeond coming" said Strauss.
i shall keep on continuing It. till
then, If necessary" said Judge Wilcox
OF at least until someone gets tired
and puts in appearance"
strauss then asked that defendant be
released upon his own recognizance.
MY advice is that you require cast
bai'. said the Judge to Mr.. Chilling
worth. and the advice won't cost yor
anything"
And the chances are that the ceremo-
mes OF the Last Great Day will be in
terfered with on account Of the Gov.
ernment praying for a postponement OF
the hnal fireworks pending the findine
or witness necessary to the proper