The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1900-10-13
BArTLED ON A MOVING TRAIN.
How the old BnBebam Pitcher Taught
Three Thfeving TrnmBa Neat
WF1nkle.

Sun reporter; seems to me there's
more of 'em this year with bad mo-
tives than L ever saw before. But I
calculate I showed three or four Of
them a trick with a hole init the other
night. Whenever l see a 'bo on the
train 1 never make a roar if he looks
as though he might have seen better
times and keeps quiet, but when they
touch your Uncle William up for q
mark they get what's a-comin' to 'em
ell right.
Last Tuesday night I was ridin' out
in the middle, all alone as usual, for the
hind man he hugs the dOghouse, ana
the head man toasts his shins in the
engine, leaving me to watch things.
l was sittin' at about the middle ofa
big box car, with my feet hangin' over
the side, m there was a Teller sittin'
at the other end of the car toward the
caboose from me. He seemed to be
keepin' company with his thoughts,
so l didn't say anything to him.
'Twasn't very long before another
Weary was sittin' 1ongside of him, m
Begosh a little later, when l looks
again, there sits three of 'em. This
begun to look like business. To make
me feel more uneasy 1 had my whole
months stuff in my trousers pocket.
We met the pay car just as we we're
leavin' the yards, N 1 had the green
boys in a wad in my jeans. Three or
four times when Ihad gone back to the
doghouse l mean to put the money
in my locker, but it had slipped my
mind, and now I was calm myself
names for bein' so careless. Only las
week Teddy Crockett, a middle brakey,
had been roughly handled n his watch
n dough taken from him.
'"Ehe train was going at a pretty
rapid clip and wasn't liable to stop
again for 80 miles, as we had taken
water. So if there was any trouble
comm 1 was in for it. Pretty soon
one of the hos, a big genius, strolled
over to me n in a milky way asked me
what time it was. oh, about an hour
earlier than it will be an hour later
was my answer, m 1 jumped to my
feet to be ready for anything hat
might be dom.
Don't get gay with your peers
says the big teller, n he makes a swipe
at my lantern n put it out. Then the
other two fellers comes up and entered
the game.
THE next three or four minutes were
very fast, but when 1 had time to
think it all over 1 was layin' fiat on my
back on top of the car, with the big
Teller goin' through my clothes. He
had just reached my pants pocket
which contained all that stood be-
tween me m poverty for the next
month, when l determined to make
another effort to get away m save my
money. 1 jerked my knees up quick
m chucked him over my head. Then I
gets up to makea-dash to the cabeoss.
over the tops Of the cars n them three.
fellers after me.
Il had hurt my leg in the mix-up M
I knew / could never reach the dog
house, as the hos were gainin' on me.
But there was three or four fat cars
right ahead of me toward the caboose
the way I was Eunnin', m 1 thought
I'd try N make these N put up as
good a fight as possible in the open.
So Ipitty-pattied over the tops of those
cars m down the end of one onto the
fat airs with the dirty rascaIs three
car-lengths behind me. They saw that
1 vas weakenin' m couldn't keep up
the pace, so they didn't rush them
selves.
'"The plan of battle 1 had fixed up was
to get up on the ladder of the first box
car at the other end of the fiat cars
and stand the buns off by kickin' at
EN-. This car was an old stock car
loaded with bags of potatoes N as 1
got my foot OF the first rung of the end
ladder my hand slipped through the
Stats IN touched one of the bags of
potatoes, IN 10 m behold you, there.
was a big hole in the bag. 1 filled my
overall pockets with those Murphies
for ammunition of war, n stepped
back down on the fiat car again. I
ulster be a baseball pitcher in my youth
m l could throw with either right or
left hand, so figured that 1 oughter be
able to put up a pretty good fight with
my pockets full of potatoes.
THE buns thought I had chucIed uu
the race N were comm over the fat.
cars at a dog trot, with the big man
in the lead. When the leader got with
in about 25 feet of me I let him ave
a potato on an inshoot from my left
hand, which caught him a soaker be-
tween the eyes N then 1 let him have
the n in my right hand right under
the belt. Well, say, he dropped all in
a heap in a jiffy n then I opened up
on the two fellers folIerin' him. I
dropped the first one a neat outshoot
behind the ear m before he could hgger
out what hit him 1 let him have an
other spud in the solar plexus. Iguegs
they must have heard the yellin' in
the caboose N on the engine for the
train commenced to slow down now N,
1 could see the lights comm over the
tops of the cars.
THE third teller saw 'em comm, too.
m as 1 drove n at him he dove off
the car. The other two fellers were too
dazed to get away, m when the other
train hands come up we made 'em
prisoners m handed EN- over to the
cops at the next station. But tbat