Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1900-10-30

CRIED OUT FOR THE MOON TO TAKE A DROP.
boss of the earth and owner of all the
planets above? Your humble slave as
sures you that the sun, moon and every
star will hustle to do your bidding"
Thanks, Remshen. ! must be a
daisy for sure. Not being clear on the
subject. ] haven't given much atten-
tiOn to celestial matters, but now ]
think I'll give them a whirl. If n fel
Ter is going to be boss at all,'he might
as well be boss on wheels"
THAT Ia true, o akound, and when
you get ready tofcommand the moon to
come off her perch will issue procla-
nation and gnther the people, N@
Old Remshpn was a fawnlng syco-
phant on skates. He had good thing
and wanted 40 Keep IT, He had said
the s0inp fulsome words to his master.
a hundred times over. but nothing had
come OF 1t except to make his position
more solid. a day or two after the
above conversation and while he was
going around the palace with a molas-
ses grin on his face the bell jinged.
and he was called into the, presence of
his master
by the way. Remshen, do you re-
member our little conversation the 9TH
er day" oueried the akound.
Can slave forget his masters
words" asked Remshen as he lifted
his hands in protest.
"I've been thinking. I'm heap of a
feler, and you know 1t. and know it,
but there may be man or two on the
outside who differs with us. l want to
do something big TO knock 'em all out"
"Will 1t please thee to behead thou
sand men?"
We'll yes, 1t would, but as 1t is just
about tax time we'd better leave their
heads on their shoulders until they
| have paid In the sugar think I'll go
for the moon, kemshen. Shell be full
tonight, and III order her to come
down to e0rth."
But. 0 ruler. she might be damaged
in the fall" protested Remshen, begin
ming to quake with fear.
"I'll look out for that Wen spread
a feather bed for her to light on. lust
issue proclamation FOR the people to
gather on the east side Of my palace at
10 O'Clock tonight"
"The moon. . ruler. is sometimes OBJ
stinate," suggested Remshen as he felt
pain, "She has even been known to
disobey mighty potentates."
"But she'll tumble for me, or I'll
know the reason why! is il not In my
title that am owner of all the planets
above2 Get along. cid boy, and issue
that proclamation. When my subjects
discover that can wallop old Luna
around at WILL, there'll be no more
kicking about high taxes"
Old Remshen was boxed up and
couldn't say another word. He went
away and issued his proclamation and
then beseechcd the grave of his father,
stars TO send dark night to knock the
experiment on the head. He was look
ing bilious when night came and the
old York state cheese arose In all her
glory. Everybody IN town was out.
and the odds were FIVE to one that the
akound would win At the hour named
he appeared on the steps OF his palace
and lifted his hands and cried out for
the moon TO talse drop, 1t was a
dead failure. He cried out again and
again, hut the moon continued her gait.
"Remshcn,' said the boss of earth
when he realized that be was knocked
out, dismiss the populace and come
with me-
The populace went away with their
tongues In their cheeks. and when the
akound Mad reached his library h
said:
How Is this, Remshen? Why dldn'
the moon come downT
20 ruler" replied the old sycophan
as his heart tunked his ribs, there is I
difference between tneory and fact"
Il see. Theoretically am owner o
the planets. Iractically am an ass.
ought to have got on to this, but belnl
so busy 1t never occurred to me. Rem
shen, old boy, come out In the bacl
yard with me-
80 mighty ruler, but what woul'
your.