Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-23
STORIETTS.

Down in Southern Georgia two Wild
ows were condoling with each other
over their troubles. In telling of the
last sickness and death of their hus-
bands, one said: MY man, poor fell
Ter, jes' suffered and suffered and suf-
fered, and then jes' died for the want
of BREATH" The other replied: wall,
mine didn't; he drawed his breath to
the very last"
/ After the rehearsal of Tristan und
Isolde" at Bayreuth once, Hans Rich
ter was asked if he had been satisfied,
to which he replied: "The love motif,
which the 'cellos have to give out,
was played with too little fire. Evil
IDENTIFY they must all be married men
who executed it so phlegmatically."
And Richter was right, for these was
| not a single bachelor among them.
| The Rev. Mr.. Alcott, of Elgin, ILL.,,
one of Abraham Lincoln's Springfield
acquaintances, tells of seeing him
coming away from church unusually,
early one Sunday morning. "The
sermon could not have been more than
half way through" says Mr.. Alcott.
His son Tad was slung across his
left arm like pair of saddle-bags,
and Lincoln was striding along with
long and deliberate steps toward his
home. On one of the street corners
he encountered group of his fell
low townsmen. Lincoln anticipated
the question which was about to be
put by the group, and, taking his fig
ure of speech from practices with
which they were only too familiar,
said: Gentlemen, entered this colt,
but he kicked around SO / had to
withdraw him."
The only person given to extrava-
gance at the present italian court is
queen Margherita, who shares the
feeling of her country women in hav-
ing an inordinate love for dress. 1t
is said that Humbert once asked one
of the queens secretaries what would
be an acceptable Christmas present
for her majesty. This gentleman,
truer friend than courtier, had the
courage to suggest to the king that
the queen had large number of I'M
| paid milliners' and dressmakers' bills.
The king took the hint, and begged
that they should all be given to him.
On Christmas morning Humbert plac-
ed all these bills, receipted, under
the queens table napkin. There was
no other present besides. 1t is said
that she took the hint, and has been
less eXtravagant since.
James Russell Lowell was dreamily
strolling along toward his home in
Cambridge one unusually beautiful
night. Slowly, with serene, queenly
majesty, full moon was ascending
her azure throne" pouring her Law
ish light over all things and softening
into semblances of beauty even the
ugly outlines of the conventional do
nestle architecture round about. Duly
illuminated by the loneliness of the
spectacle, the poet, as he passed by
the house of the estimable brother
man who supplied meat to him regu-
larly for a slight consideration of
profit, noticed that valuable citizen
leaning on his fence and gazing up
in kind of rapt' way. 1t pleased
Lowell to think that the butchers
immortal soul was bathing itself in
the flood of semi-spiritual moonlight,
and, pausing, he remarked: "What
a beautiful night it is. neighbor!"
eyes, Mr.. Lowell. | was just a-thinkin'
what a bully night for a slaughterin'
this would be-" "Of course, of course"
gasped the poet, beating a hasty re-
treat.
How nice it is to escort a young
lady home from church and then ac-
cept an invitation to dinner
Frank Burke, aged thirteen years,
who died recently in Ansonia, Conn.,,
had been delicate from birth. Shortly
before his death the discovery was
made that his heart was on his right
side.
/ In Geneva, Switzerland, glass blocks
are used to pave the streets. They
are made of the refuse from the glass
factories, and give great satisfaction.
They are pleasant to the eye and very
durable.
Many people get credit who are not
entitled to it.
Retribution is visitor we should
avoid by doing nothing to cause it.
Be generous, but not such an ex.
tent as to impoverish yourself.
Stand up for your rights. but be
sure you have some to stand up for,
The man who lives only to amuse
himself has the hardest kind of
task to perform.
The somnambulist who tumbles from
a roof is an illustration of one way
to fall asleep.
Nothing comes home to a man SO
much as an unsettled bill.
Think only good, speak only good
10 only good.
A tongue may inflict a deepen
wound than sword.
In seven out of twelve short stories
the heroine weds before 25 years old.
Nothing hurts so much as discov-
ering deception in one we love.
Deliver us from the dyspeptic who
seeks to misrepresent us.
Gratitude is virtue that cannot ba
overdone.
He who conquers his evil desires is
as much hero as a warrior.
Is Life Worth Living.
Sleeplessness, debility, nervousness
and palpitation of the heart are not
diseases; they are symptoms indi-
eating that the various vital organs
are not working in harmony. Nor
ley's Liver and Kidney Cordial re-
stores order and rids the body of al!
waste products that clog the system.
1t insures sound digestion, sound
nerves. and sound sleep. Ask your
druggist.
Room for improvement-the school
room.
Ladies' Shirt Waists
Are best preserved by using Maple City
Self Washing Soap. All grocers.