The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1900-09-02
lMINORT AIS Talk
OF MODERN TIMES
George Thinks Valley Forge is Not
in 1t.
PATRICK HENRY SURPRISED.
.1onmy- Jefferson Takes Hand In
the Discussion. and Tells OF His
Famous Ridc-Too Much
for lewis
PATRICK HENRY SURPRISED.

grass IN the Ca2itoi Square was parcheo
and brown Preparation poured from the
brows OF those who were listening to the
band seated In the Henry Clay pavilion:
the only breeze stirring came from the
hollow depths OF the brass bass horn, and
this was as hot as the breath from fur
mace. The reporter was hiding in the
shade OF one of the trees and blessing the
foresight OF Thomas Jefferson, when he
was astonished to hear a hum Of CONVEX
sation from the usually quiet group OF pa
triots and statesmen around the immortal
George. He grew interested and drew
nearer. watching and listening in awe and
worder to the words that fell from their
lips.
Pat sait George. dropping the reins
on his horses neck and wiping the beads
OF perspiration from his noble brow with
a delicately embroidered cambria hand
kerchief, VALLEY Forge wasn't in it with
this weather. Why. it's as warm as my
father made st for me when ! cut tiiat
blooming cherry-tree down. I've never
hear the last Of that story. This thing OF
being the Father of Your Country isn't
what It's cracked up to be. Here I've been
sitting up here IN the brcilinE sun all day
for no other purpose than being stared
at by old man and his young wife on
their honeymoon. who. while pretending
to be awcd by my greatness, were hold
ing hands under the lap-rohe of the car
rage. But ] was on to them remen-
Der few things of the experiences OF my
younger days. and / was married once
myself
Yes" replied Patrick: It's hot enough
for me- but Tn surprised at you.
thought you. the only and original Faith
er of His Country would get off some
thing fresh, even if the weather is warm.
never would have sprung that old gag
about giving me Liberty or Death If l
~ N.I n
Here ] am standing with my arms out
stretched like the pictures of Moses when
he parted the waters of the Ked Sea for
those children to cross without wettinS
their feet. When 7 was kid I liked to
paddle IN the water with bare feet and
feel tho mud ooze between my toes. but
there's 10 accounting for tastes, as the
old woman said -''
JEFF AND THE GIRLS.
'tThat will do. Pat interrupted Tom
ME Jefferson. There are too many pref
fy girls walking around here to be talk
ing about kissing COWS. That joke is older
than the Declaration of Independence.
and not near so well written. even If
did have pen in drafting the latter
THE first thing you know smoke ND
John Marshall. as he gave hitch to his
ermine robe you will get my friend Ma
son started on his Bill of RIGHTS. and he's
as hard to stop as Traction car going
DOWN hIoad street NH. ana II You think
that's easy ask the motornan.'
fright or wrong said Pat. "eink or
swim, Tn very tired OF outstretching my
arms with no Aaron to help hold them up.
and so far as can see, 7 am accomplish
ing no good. have heard that one or two
persons have crossed the James dry-shod
the rocks. but with the number of
bridges they have. they might give me
rest.
ST bet that fellow Henry Clay began
Lewis, who M to this time had main
tanned a discreet silence. apparently en-
crossed in the music OF the band. .'had
rather be President than right where he
Is now, with that man pounding the bass
drum and the tinklng cvmbals in his very
ears If not, he has more music in his
anatomy than I have. / had rather hear
a warwhoop any time of the night than
to be storped up in the pen with whole
brass band"
But he is dressed for the occasion.
and you're not. and that makes a differ
ence." remarked Thomas Nelson That
hunting-shirt of yours is as bad as the
shirt-waist and reminds me of the rainy
day skirts the women are wearing
Don't You fret. my boy. 7 thrashed
the Indians and If posterity don't name
a country after me. it's not my fault
jim TURNS UP ALL RIGHT
81 wonder what has become of Jim Mad
ison7" called out George. from his seat
in the saddle. ] think he ought to be in
the party. Pom my soul, I do. He helped
frame the Constitution. and did various
other things worthy OF mention; yet he
sleeps neacefullv up in the graveyard at
Montpelier while I am destined to ride
this horse into eternity with Two pairs
OF reins That's my chief trouble 7 de-
test double reins. and 4 man who can't
manage horse with one yair don't de-
serve to be called a Virginia gentleman
Tom only used one pair when Tarleton
made his raid toward Monticello said
Patrick land have always heard he did
some pretty good cross-country riding at
that time
'They never touched me. anyway" said
Tommy: 'I have always considered that
ride one OF the w!sest acts of my life
next to founding the University of vir-
GINA. BY the way, speaking of hot wealth
er. 1t was rather warm for me the day
the Rotunda burned down Moreover,
George you are In rather dangerous
place over there in the Capitol. IF that
building We're to catch fire. even Fitz Lee
coudn't save you.''
well. Thomas. I have seen better
places. but have also seen worse. The
day that Lee got such renteei cuss:ne
from me was had one. I was a warm
thing that day. But. to 20 back little.
what rifles me Is to see these peonle bob
bling up and down in their saddles and
calling It riding. Now. wouldn't cut
a pretty figure IL they had fixed me In
bronze that way I thing they must have
rins in their saddles or wheels in their
head
GEORGE TOO CONSERVATIVE
George. old man. REPLIED Pat. ''vou are
entirely too conservatives That is only
a manifestation of the march of progress
and civilization. Eut You had better get
a FIRE Insurance policy on your life In case
the CAPITOL should burn down: There
goes an insurance man now. and he will
call on YOU at any time of the night or
day If he gets the least linking OF your
Intentions OF taking out a policy.
I'D leave my happy home for you.
! called out Tomr,ie Jefferson. as partlc-
uiariv pretty girl passed.
That's what I cali brazen.'' said the
great George.
The Girl seemed to thing so. too. else
she heard him not. for she passed on.
The hand Mayed "IIome. Sweet Home. "
snd Henry Clay sirhed a sigh OF relief as
the crowd dispersed
.sThe sitting is adiournea.' said the