New-York tribune., 1900-03-10
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

The teacher OF Kansas City school had to leave
the room for a few minutes and gave the children
some drawing to do. When she came back there
was in the atmosphere something that told her
that all had gone well during her absence. and
two OF the boys were hanging their heads. Now.
boys she asked sorrowfuy. have you been doing
something that you know 1 should not have liked
you 10 do?''
'Yess'm." came the meek reply.
What did you do?''
Well. you see thought you'd ask who'd
whispered when you back. just talked
out loud
=. "IIurrahr exclaimed Mr.. Blykins with anina-
What's the matter?" asked his wife;
The The Brit British have captured General Cronje
1T GaHs o9 just realized the
needn't worry any more about ,whstheE oSsh!
-CWashington Star
The Goodland G<an) News" says: "A Populist
came in to the other day with a look Of
trouble on his brow. He said he had read in his
paper that the Republican party realized that the
coming election would be their last victory at the
polls. and rather than the Populis,s IN power
they were going to destroy the world We asked
how He said that his paper stated that the Pacific
Ocean was several hundred feet lower than the
Atlantic Ocean. and the Republicans Intended to
dig the canal and when they got IT done the water
would run into the Pacific and get us out OF hal,
ance. and the world would go kersmash We told
MIN as the Populists had found out the schema
we expected the Republicans would give II up He
said he hoped so. but he going to have the
County Central Committee meet ANYHOW ana toIL
the matter over"
Now. Perry" said the little boys mother ..1
want want you to quit eating much sugar and YOU
may as well quit teasing for sweets becauss 7
snail not let you have them. Don't YOU know thar
children who are always eating sweet things never
~ Yes man mamma ! know" the child answered.
reading about ts Robs last n9u nsb know
s ns b? o% mnS he is so What's the
piease|'-Chicago Times Herald.
correspondent writes: 'I send YOU an en,tanb
which read boy. over seventy years ago 7,
suggests the old lines found In an English church
yard:
This world is city full of crooked streets:
II life was only merchandise to buy one meets
The rich would live. the poor alone would die
The epaph, as i remember. It, runs as follows:
Beneath this stone lies Archie Bib.
Who; without tears. for forty years
Did carcases inter.
But Death a last
For his work past
Thus unto him did say:
Resign your spade,
Give up your trade,
And forthwith come away"
Without reply asking why
The summons he obeyed,
Resigned his life and spade
M,sress-so your first is Clornda Well. I
think will call you by your last name while Won
in my service
New Maid-Very we'll. ma'am.
Mistress-By the way, what is your last name?
New Maid-Darng. na'am.
The gallant New-York fremen quickly swung the
heavy searchlight apparatus into place. and mo-
ment later the dazzling lines of light cut binding
pathways across the field Of night.
Do you locate the fire." shrieked the Chief
AT last!' screamed the operator. There she
blazesl'
Then fierce stream shot forth a wild cry arose
TO the darkened heavens. and a drenched man sped
with howls of horror down the echoing highway
They had mistaken the big diamond In the shirt
front of Tammany'S Street Cleaning Commits
sioner for ncipent confagration.-(Clevelan nd
Plain Dealer.
and Elizabeth Railway Company. In Kentucky
says: Our road it's first car out Of Hodgesy,lle
about ten months ago. The people from the sur
rounding country came to town that day. among
them old mountaineer. He very much i'm
pressed. II the first he had ever seen The
boys jokingly told him that the was off for
Europe, and after much persuasion got him aboard
After the had started the old fellow rushed TO
the door and tried to get Off. He was restrained
Then, thinking all he had heard true he pulled
off his cap and In the most serious voice said:
- 'Good-by. these United States
THAT is but incident showing the ignorance
of the mountainecrs. There hundreds like him
in the mountains
The temporary indisposition OF Mr. Gerard Bal
four recalls to Irish correspondent true story
Secretary visiting congested district he was
laid up with a sharp chill Hearing OF this an
Irishwoman loafng at a cabin door said to con-
car the day long. and take glass OF the crathur
al livery house he met by the powers he wouldn't
at dark have any idea he was III at all at an"-
dondOn outlook.