Virginian-pilot. (Norfolk, Va.) 1898-1911, 1900-05-13
Copyright, 1900. by Amos j. Cum
mingS)

Washington, D. c., May ia re-
markable change is manifest in some of
the members OF the House or Represent
tauves. They are becoming impregnat-
ed with dignity. Men who have been
heretofore intensely social in DISPOSE
ton seem to have changed their nature.
Round shouldered gentlemen walk with
heads erect and assume airs more be
fitting the House of Lords than the
Commons Others run their fingers per-
sistently through their hair and with
understanding grandiloquence talk in
cultural tones like Dutch burgomast-
ers. They no longer shake hands i'm
puisively. but deliberately. clasping
your fingers firmly, yet patroniZingly.
n Few ad-shouldercd fellows throw
out their chests like pouter pigeons, or
walk la Napoleon, with their hands
behind their backs, as if in q brown
study. They frequently clear out their
throa;s. as though they were about To
utter words fraught with profound
wisdom Mysterious conferences are
neid In dark corners and window en-
orasures.and ment usually modest IN de-
meaHor strut over the floor in an effort
to look like first-class statesmen.
Gravity is enthroned on every face,
and they address the House with n dig
nifty heretofore unknown. Same of these
political gentry could give lessons to
MIR. Turveydrop In department, and
others fairly outsrip Thomas IL Ben
ton in their emphatic hauteur. They
listen to the speeches of their colleagues
twiddling their thumbs. apparent
1y absorbed in reflective thought These
asterisks of dignity dot the floor as our
new possessions dot the Oriental seas.
At times the House listens to them I'm
profound silence and anon wings shafts
OF ridicule at them. Their intense self
respect repels the shafts. whatever fate
"Details their arguments. Wrapt in
dreams OF future glory, they are I'M
moved and resent all in situations with
scornful faces.
The secret OF this remarkable change
is the fact that these members are all
candidates for Vice President. Some
have small heads and big feet; others
have large heads and little feet; yet all
imagine themselves candidates; indeed
lew act as though they were already
nominated. No pestilence could create
a greater havoc in Congress. New vic
tins are in evidence every day The
disease appears to be incurable. Some
nre candidates without knowing 1t, and
others fancy themselves so when they
are not. The cause of the malady is
unknown. 1t begins with II palpitation
ly shifts to the brain. The intellect be-
comes opalesccnt. scintillating like van
guard sunbeams dashinE along the
chilly reaches Of opening day.
All these complications are caused by
what Is known as the Vice Presidential
microbe. The malady is never cured
until national political conventions are
held. The cure is sometimes exceed
inBly painful. but always effective The
fever iiuctuates in intensity. One of the
worst cases has been developed in n
member known as "the man with the
bottomless lung" A clinical thcrmom-
eter was lately placed under his tongue
IT, registered an alarming temperature
los degrees. Singular to say, he is
not yet dead, and is still indulging in
the Well-seaSOned porringer of popu-
lnrlty. The microbc does it's deadliest
work In victims who appear indifferent
Their assumed nonchalance betrays the
extreme ravages of the disease There
are several such cases in the House and
one or two in the Senate. Newspaper
articles on the Vice Presidency have a
bad effect upon the patients. The tenn
perature is increased by such excite
ment. and the Indifferent victim Is apt
10 betray his anxiety. The declared
candidate, however. is affected differ
emily by newspaper comment. In some
cases his temperature runs several de-
grees lower than normal. and a low
gerous than high one.
The real candidates lie with their ears
close to the ground listening for the
tramp Of the November leslons. They
are in telephone communication with
their home States, and work their
newspaper friends with hidden wires.
At times. however. the newspapers
work them, and sometimes do them.
They forget that episodes are far
sweeter than applause, and wayside
Joys better than final successes. All
the real candidates are capable and
available men. Some travel along the
political sky like meteors. and others
pursue the steady course of q fixed star
Probably the most dashIng of all the
candidates is John Jacob Lentz. of
Ohio He has square shoulders, q
physique adapted to the burdens of the
highest office In the land, and a face
Indicative of absolute confidence and
unyielding determination. Lentz like
Bryan. is ever on the stump. One night
he will appear in Boston at an anti
annexation meeting; the next night at
Philadelphia at Boer gathering, a
third night at Detroit at AN antitrust
assemblage. a fourth night at Chicago
In free silver demOnStra lion a fifth
night in Cincinnati in a dcnunciation
of the Porto Rico bill, and the sixth
day turn up in Washington in great
trim for the Occur d'AleNe investiga-
ton before the Military Committee. No
filter running mate for Bryan can be
found. Lentz arouses the utmost en-
thusiasm wherever he goes. In New
York thousands crowded Cooper Union
TO hear him speak against the colonial
policy of the administration. He car
ried the meeting off it's feet by his
eloquence, and they arose en masse and
cheered -Aguinaldo 20 the echo. At the
great anti-imperial convention in Phil
adclphia, LentZ created n greater stir
than Cart Gol,nry and Charge Don.-