St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1900-05-26


lost him while l was shopping in tho
Baltimore store last Friday. Dear lit
tie fellow. I do hope you've fed him.
know he won't eat meat. We always
give him bread and milk. I'd like to
pay you for your trouble. and how
; much did the advertisement cost? /
suppose I'll have to pay that?"
Miss" l said, there's some mis-
take. The dog I've advertised is not
named Fido. l do not know what his
name is. but it's not Fido. As for feed
ing him bread and milk, this dog has
eaten two dollars worth OF porterhouse
| steak and"
well, l do think the police ought to
get after these people who put mislead-
ing advertisements in the papers.
suppose they're too busy arresting
gamblers to pay any attention to these
confidence men; if my brother were
here, he'd show you how to-"
"Jawkins," shouted, ''show the lady
out"
beg pardon, sir" said Jawkins. with
suspicion of smile. There's seven
boys of varying ages. about sG men.
| nine women and policeman waiting
in the front yard to see you, sir; be-
lieve it's in regard to an advertise
ment."
20, Lord!" l CALCULATED. ''Show up
the most respectable, Jawkins."
1t was a middle-aged woman OF
hard visage that came in, aud took
| the most comfortable chair in the
place.
would you mind throwing that
nasty cigar down." she said, looking at
me from over her spectacles. 4 cant
abide smoke"
Certainly. madam" / said. throw
ing my cigar in the fireplace. What
can DO for you? Did you come about
the lost dog?"
Il came, sir, as the representative OF
the Associated Workers in the<Cause
OF Right Living. to ask you for sub
scription to-"
Madam, never subscribe thus early
in the nnorning.- replied.
They're stin a-coming. sir" broke
in Jawkins.
They were coming indeed!
They came on foot, in carriages, in
farm wagons, in buggies. Each street
car that stopped by my door dis
charged half dozen or more passen-
gers, who rushed pell-mell to my gar
den, which was by this time seething
mass Of humanity. AS went to the
front porch and looked out over the
sea of faces, could hear many in the
crowd calling some one .'swindler,' =
: "cheat," and saying: "Don't believe
he's got any dog" Its all put-up
similar remarks.
/ sneaked back into the front hall
way. "Jawkins,' said, where is that
dog?"
THAT minister's trying to coax him
out of the stable, sir" was the reply.
went back to the stable and
found the collie still tied there. but he
was getting excited at the noise out
side and at the strange manner of the
Theosophist, who was, believe. try
lux ~ nN PuOtfLC Ah0OA L IA.
structions, Jawkins loosened the chain,
and the dog. with savage snarl.
sprang at the Theosophist, who turned
and fled. So did /. The dog caught the
minister before he had gone very far,
and took good taste OF theosophical
blood; then he turned on the darky
and got a mouthful of whitewash. and
then. catching glimpse of the large
crowd, he ran around the house. and,
with a battle cry in his throat, sailed
in.
was SO excited and so exasperated
ut the events of the morning that for
got myself, and in the midst of the
melee found myself shouting: .Sic
'em, Tige! Take 'em, old man! Good
doggie! Sic 'em! Sic."
The crowd parted, wavered, fed. and
the dog, hoarse with much barking,
lay down on the front lawn, right in
the midst of bed of Gala lilies, and
painted with exhaustion.
'He's mad" went up the cry.
The street ears had stopped. the
whole street in front of my house was
filled with an excited mob. breathing
dire vengeance on my devoted head.
The policeman who had, in the mean
time, sent in hurry-up call for help
to the police station, came stealthily
around the house. He had shining
revolver in his hand. He crept up to
the dog and with well directed shot
that startled the neighborhood. and
broke one of my parlor windows. he
ended the dogs troubles forever.
saw him bleeding all over my Gala
lilies. / saw the crowd. still grow
ing in proportions as additional edi-
tions of the News gave my "ad'' wider
publicity. and. coward that am. fear
ing the consequences. fed out Of the
back door and am now spending more
money than l can afford in Chicago,
waiting for the effects Of my want ad.