davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
PITR AND POINT.
a mean meaning is seldom hidden
Chicago DISPATCH

a mean meaning is seldom hidden
Chicago Dispatch.
If you happen to have an idle day.
remember the rights of the men who
are engaged with busy day.-Atchi-
son Globe.
do you think doctors ought to help
an incurable patient to die?'' IF he
can't die without medical assistance,
yes."-Detroit Journal.
Appreciation.-Dr. Fox-"What sem
sation arises from the contemplation
of self?" Bushong-''The sense of the
beautiful. Roanoke Collegian.
Not to Be Caught.-''There's a boy
wants to see you. sir HAS he got
a bill in his hand?'' NO, sir Then
he's got it in his pocket; send him
away!"-Puck.
\ Brooklyn barber was shaving a
sleepy patron and found it difficult
or I can't shave you" he said We'll,
then" was the response of the drowsy
man, ''cut my hair
You're looking badly. Are you ill?"
To-day is the first time in three
months that 1 have been able to go
out" What in the world did you
do?" Il didn't do anything. But the
judge wouldn't believe me."-N. O..
Times-Democrat.
Hicks-"So far as my observation
goes. everything depends upon train
ing" Wicks-"Not everything. There's
that clerk of Virgins. He was taught
upright penmanship at school, but
notwithstanding that he has turned
out a forger. "-Boston Transcript.
Fair Warning.-"Glamis thou art,
and Cawdor thou shalt be!' cried the
witch. $50 be it, DAME" replied Mac
beth, of course, out of the hearing
of Shakespeare. But if the predic-
ton goes astray I'll have you up for
fortune-telling. -Fhiladelphia North
American.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
Two Kinds.

I'm locking for WIFE" said the
man from the country, bluntly.
The manager of the matrimonial
agency rubbed his hands together and
smiled genially.
''Yes, yes" he said, pleasantly. 1--WE
have MANY estimable ladies on our list,
and we shall be glad to place you in
correspondence with one"
Trained or untrained?" asked the
man from the country.
ST beg your pardon" returned the
matrimonial agent. II don't believe
I quite understand"
Maid or widow" said the man from
the country, by way of explanation.
After that, of course, it was readily
seen that he was not the inexperienced
man he had seemed.-Chicago Post.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
Age Limit for Cheese.

"A few years ago" said Harry Cum
ningham. of Montana. at Chamber
lain's. the late Charlie Broadwater.
of our state. gave Il banquet to about
a score of his personal friends 1t
was an elaborate spread. and one of
the chief items was some 20-year-cid
brandy that cost Mr.. Broadwater a
fabulous price and regarding which
he spoke with much enthusiasm
AT the wind-up of the feast coffee
and Roquefort cheese were brought
in, though the latter was not COM
monty down on Montana menus at
that period. Sitting near the host
was one of his special friends. who.
after eying the Roquefort trif1e sus-
piciously. tasted it. made a wry face
and showed his plate to one side.
"'You don't seem to like that re-
marked Mr.. Broadwater
Indeed. l do not, Charlie. Your
20-year-old brandy is all right. but
I'll be hanged if I like your 20-year.
old cheese Washington Post.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

agreeable to the union" continued the
able, land the date for the marriage
was fixed. / was to perform the cere-
mony which was to make them man
and wife. If l were to live to a hun
dred, monsieur, 1 should never forget
that day. Her companions had deco
rated with flowers and lights the
church, which was crowded that morn
ing, because here all the people know
each other and are good friends, ard
everyone liked her and wished her well.
Il was in the sacristy waiting, but
half-past IL, the hour at which the
marriage was to take place, struck, and
the bridegroom had not arrived. Then
/ heard a stir in the church, and I
looked out to see Marie Beaucost and
her bridesmaids all in white come up
the aisle-a fair sight. Marie seemed
surprised that Louvigny was not at the
altar before her, and so were we all,
but we expected him every second, and
every step we heard we felt sure was
his-his which no man was to hear
evermore.
Il could see how anxious she was as
AAAN CHIit
crePt through the old church, and lit
tie by little silenced the congregation
1t seemed as if death had stolen in
among them, making his presence felt.
though unseen. as he advanced to the
altar. The bride began TO treTnble. and
soon she raised her eyes to mine APP
pealingly, as if praying me to exercise
the cruel fear that was freezing her
life
After what seemed an interminable
time the third quarter of the hour
struck, and in the stiffness that fol-
lowed those present began to lock al
each other questioningly, while the
young girl awaiting her bridegroom
had turned as white as her veil.
<'As yet we waited in hope and fear
we heard hurried footsteps in the square
outside. then n confused sound OF agi-
tated voices, while smothered cry and
pitiful prayer went up from some WON
en- near the door. Then from lip to lip,
hurriedly. confusedly, wildly, like Il
hare rushing up the aisle, came the
news that Louyigny had just been
killed.
An accident?' / suggested, as the
priest paused.
No. Murdered!"
by his rival?''
Yes. On leaving the house with his
narentS and friends IN their WAY IN
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
tempt for the mockery of an ostent..

tempt for the mockery Of an ostenta>
ton of unreal Woe
It is fortunate for the country that
there have arisen time and person
to stop this ghoul-hke performance.
Mrs. Chickering has established pre-
cedent which ought to stand forever
as a bar to future congressional fu-
neral committees. There ought to be
no more funds paid out of 1.-The con-
tingent fund" on such occasions for
champagne, whisky, cigars, gloves.
flowers, carriages, decorations, sump-
tuous breakfasts, elaborate dinners
and orgy suppers on the funeral
trains. Well-informed people have
long been shocked and Inundated by
knowledge of the preposterous pa
geantry, the discreditable and vulgar
ostentation, the shameful junketing
on such occasions, and the extrava-
CANT expenditures incurred in these
fragrant parodies on sincere mourning
and heartfelt grief.
Mrs. Chickering deserves the admira-
ton of the country. the gratitude OF
women and the plaudits of the people
for her firm stand against the con-
gressional spree and vulgar demonstra-
tions of eutteTsnipes in high places.
She honored herself. and honored
her sex. in honoring the memory of her
husband Ly TINS forbidding the pres
ence Of congressional committee at
the funeral
It would require great deal of time
to examine the books of the senate and
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

house of representatives, in order tic
secure the statistics concerning the
cost of all congressional funerals. But
in a speech on this subject, delivered
in December, 1895, Senator PETER, OF
Kansas. gave some statistics which had
been carefully compiled, and from that
official utterauce the following facts
are gathered:
The first congressional funeral was
that of Senator Gaillard, of South Caro-
lima, which occurred February 2G, 1926,
at an expense of Ss77.44. Twenty-four
senator's had previously died, and the
| congress had lot paid their expenses
of interment. Read how the expenses
increased from time to time in the fol-
lowing funerals of senators:
John Fairfield, of Maine, December "A.
1S47, 81, 072.25
| Chester Ashley, Arkansas. April %, 1s4s,
| 81, 505.42-
John c. Calhoun. South Carolina, March
| 81 1885, IS, 1O647.
Henry Clay, Kentucky. June %. 1852, S.
| 447.O2
Solomon Foot, Vermont, March IS, 1866.
| 81, 399. 81
Charles Sumner, Massachusetts, March
| II, 1874. 81, 6S7- SO.
Matthew H Carpenter Wisconsin. Febru-
| airy a 1881, S. Oh 81
John F. Miller, California. March s, 1886.
| SIS, 1924.
George Hearst, California, February IS
1891, $21,G2 So
Just look at the difference in the cost
of the funerals of the two California
senators. The funeral of Senator Mil
Ter cost $3,532.34. The funeral of Sen
ator Hearst cos< $21 1926. The same
distance was traversed, and the eX-
penses should not have been very diff
ferent. Senator Hearst was popular
man, and d good man in many respects.
If he could have had anything to say
in the matter his funeral would not
have been a three weeks junket for
senators, representatives and favorite
employees, twice across the continent,
IN the course of which upwards of SIS
600 should be expended for champagne,
cigars and luxurious banqueting. He
was a proud man, and a rich man, who
would rather have paid all expenses
himself, even though they had been
twice as large, than to have had his
name recorded as it is in this manner.
Some of those who disgraced his mem
ory in this manner still hold public
places.
This is but brief presentation of
facts; only a partial culling of incl
dents from a vast accumulation of in
cidents of this nature. The people do
not know, and it is just as well that
they do not know. the many ways in
which their moneys are wasted, under
various pretexts and devices. But the
disgraceful funeral junkets which have
occurred should be known. at least in
part, in order that the brave stand
taken by the wife of the late congress
man from New York may the better be
understood and the more fully appre-
ciated.
Without redundancy, but for the
sake of emphasis, the statement may
be repeated that this good woman has
honored herself, honored the memory
of her husband, and honored her sex,
as well as rendered service to her coun-
try, by refusing to permit recurrence
of revolving scandal on the occasion
of the closing of the grave over the
body of her beloved.
SMITH D. FRY.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
The Money Powers Lair.

We have heard much in recent
years of ''the money power" We
have frequently asked for the domi-
cile of this power and have never sue
ceeded in locating it. But the ship
ping subsidy raid upon the United
States treasury leaves trail behind
it which is easy to follow, and we ac-
cordingly conclude that the money
power must rendesvouz about the Of
fees of the Standard Oil trust and it's
chief financial institutions and lead
ing fiscal agent of the United States
treasury department, the National
City bank of New York. And if half
that is told in the stock market of
the copper and iron and other spec
ulative ramifcations of the trust is
true, we certainly have traced the
money power to its lair at last
Springfield Republican.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
The Republican show.

With Capt. Mahan preaching an
archy, and denouncing the right of a
people to govern themselves: Score
tary Gage leaving his official duties
and guzzling wine at banquets given
to laud Mckinley, Imperialism and
bloat prosperity to tax-ridden and
bond-robbed people; Mckinley him
self Boosting of campaign of Chris
tianization at the point of the sword,
and all the rag-tag and bobtail of tax
eaters burrowing like moles into the
voting precincts, ginshops, churches.
vaudevilles and slums for Mckinley
votes, the people have the grandest
aggregation of grand and lofty tum-
bling and acrobatic contortionism
ever witnessed.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
noupcement of Il

gresham, in the senate and house of
representatives, committees of those
bodies were appointed to attend his
funeral, ostensibly to show to his
neighbors and friends the esteem in
which he had been held by the con-
gress. The sergeant-at-arms of the
senate and the sergeant-at-arms OF
the house made preparations for a
funeral train to bear the COMPRESSION
al joint committee to the scene of the
funeral. Their preparations were cut
short, however, by the decision Of
Mrs. Chickering that no congressional
committee would be desired by her or
by the other members of the family.
Congressman Chickering was a very
popular member of the house of rep
resentatives. The announcement of
his death caused sincere sorrow to
those of his colleagues who knew him,
and he was well known to almost
every man in public life. But con-
gressional committee could not have
honestly shown respect and esteem
for him, unless the members of the
committee had departed from the Gus
tom which has prevailed of late years.
On all occasions when the subject
came up for discussion Mr.. Chickering
denounced the hilarious junketing in
dulged in by congressman on funeral
committees, and he often declared
that if he should die, while a member
of the house of representatives, he
would want no junketing at his tuner
al. His wife saw enough of the hollow
ness of this congressional mockery;
and it is to her eternal honor as
wife, and to her everlasting credit as
an American woman of the highest
type, that she carried out the wishes
of her deceased husband, and also
demonstrated her own individual con-
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

Since his Inauguration President
Mckinley has pardoned IL bank wreck
ers and committed the sentences of
nine. Then he signed the single gold
standard bill the other day, which
gives the bank more power and more
temptation to deal recklessly with the
interests of the people. He is said to
be very much grieved that public sem
timent does not exercise more Glenn
ency about Secretary Cages dealings
with the Standard Oil bank in New
York. The democrats want that mat
ter still more thoroughly aired. Hence
an additional reason why congress
should adjourn before any more Off
Gals can be asked to give embarrass-
ing details about their dispositions of
the weighty affairs intrusted to their
care.-Adolph Patterson.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

"What! back again!" exclaimed the
young houseReeper; you can't expect
me to give you cake every day?''
mo, lady" replied the poor beggar.
''I thought maybe you had an old suit
of black clothes you might give me.
Me poor ole mother eat the cake YOU
gev me yestid'y.' -Philadelphia Press
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
Her Criticism.
SMITH D. FRY.

what would you do if you could
play the piano as good as / CAM" asked
a young lady of the housemaid.
'Shure an Oh wouldn't get discour-
aged at all, at all. Old kape roight on
larnin' till Oh could play it dacently,"
was the reply.-Chicago Daily News.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
A Lovers Ipuuiry.

Mamma-Did Mr.. Smiddle say any.
thing that leads you to think that he
intends to propose?
Daughter-He asked me if there was
a mortgage on the house. = Boston
Transcript.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
The Worm Turned.

Clara latter tiff presume you
would like your ring back?
George-Never mind; keep it. No
other girl know could use that ring,
unless she wore it on her thumb.-Tit-
pits
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
This Porto Rico outrage

This Porto Rico outrage il
breeding a rebellion against expan-
sion If we are not to expand except
as imperialists, making ourselves
hated as oppressors where we go,
there will be an irresistible demand
for the abandonment of policy that
cannot be brought into harmony with
the constitution and that denies to
others the rights which we claim in
the declaration of independence for
ourselves as natural and inalienable.
North American (Rep).
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
DON'T Contradict.

If your opponent is bigger than you,
don't contradict him, even though
YOU know he is in the wrong.-Chl.
cago Daily News
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
Dire vengeance.

She-I heard about the eiopement
Has her mother forgiven them?
He-I think not I understand she
has gone to live with them.-Collier's
Weekly.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29
No InSurnpce.

An underwater says the eyes of
women kindle the only flames against
which there is no insurance.-Chicag
Daily News
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

MIR. Mckinley is now earnestly
urging the republican congressman to
ignore his own message, in which he
declared that it was the plain duty
of our government to establish free
trade between this country and Porto
Rico Memphis Appeal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

The administration is very much
worried. The visitors at the white
house are getting into an ominous
habit of predicting democratic success
this year. Mckinley, like other inn
perialists, considers this lese majestic,
but he has to listen to it just the same.
The members of his congress also
annoy him by keeping him posted on
the criticisms which their constitu-
ents make about his stupid policy in
relation to Porto Rico. He changes
his mind on that subject so often that
nobody bothers any more 10 find out
whether he believed what he said in
his message at the time he wrote it,
or whether he saw more light" since.
In fact, Mckinley finds himself con-
siderably out of accord with the very
people on whom he must depend for
reelection.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

From this time on congress will
rush through the absolutely neces-
sary legislation and adjourn at the
earliest possible date.
Every day the fact is emphasized
that the differences in the republican
ranks are so great that it is impossi-
BILE to attempt to put through any
logical programme. The trust infiu-
ences have no objection so far as
Porto Rico is concerned. because the
failure to iegislate will leave the
Dingiey tariff in force. The iusurrec-
ton is not over in the Philippines
anyway, SO an early adjournment will
prevent a wrangle on that point.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

The republicans do not seem able to
put the ship subsidy bin into shape
which will be acceptable to the ship
building interests, and yet command
enough votes to pass it.
The bill spends large portion of it's
time getting tinkered in committee.
1t has now a clause stating that it is
amenable to the antitrust law of 1890.
This is perfectly safe so long as there
is republican administration, because
that law is construed by the present
attorney general as not applicable to
any of the trusts. The bill is thorough
ly mischievous and dangerous. 1t is
| a clear steal for the benefit of a few
ship builders who have all the work
they can do now. These same ship
| builders have combination which is
practically trust. AT any rate it will
do as an instrument for dividing the
spells.
The republicans are half afraid to
l.ass the BILL because there is such
protest about it from all sections of
the country and regardless of party.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1900-03-29

Then the disclosures in the Occur
d'A1ene mining investigation show
an application of militarism and a
disregard of the rights of citizenship
that the republicans can hardly ex-
cuse. They have about made up their
minds to get away and not let their
democratic colleagues ask them hard
questions about how it all happened
and what they propose, to do about it.
The only thing the republicans pro-
pose to say or do on the subject of
trusts is the absurd constitutional
amendment proposed by Representa-
tive Ray. 1t is carelessly drawn and
is merely a man of straw set up to
serve campaign purposes.
The submission of a proposed con-
stitutional amendment to the people
viii tide the whole question over the
campaign. The republicans will pro-
pose to go before the people of the
country with the pretense that they
did not have power to legislate in re-
lation to trusts unless the people
gave them specific directions in the
shape of a constitutional amendment.
They propose under the cover of this
amendment to promise all sorts of re-
forms if only they are returned to pow
er. They perhaps forget that they
showed no such reverence for the con-
stitution when they started out to put
up a tariff barrier between the states
and Porto Rico. The passage of the
s., 000,0 900 relief bill will satisfy neither
the Porto Ricans nor the members of
their own party.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1900-12-11
WEATHER FORECAST.

FORECAST for Tuesday and "Wednesday
notwithstanding fair Tuesday ana
"wednesday: fresh westerly winds. beccr11-
iEs variable &
North Carolina-Fair Tuesday and We'd
nesday; light winds, mostly easteriy
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1900-12-11
TOOK CUP OF MILK
FOR AN I'LL CHILD
Old Woman Sentenced to Prison for
This, But Was Instantly Par
doned by the Governor.

Governor Tyler yesterday pardoned a
poor white woman whom Justice Crutch-
field had only a few minutes before SEN
fenced TO jail for fifteen days for taking
a cup of milk of the valHe of II cents, the
cup Included and giving the nourshment
10 her sick child. The case was a most
pathetic one and the course of the Cover
nor was exactly in accordance with the
wishes of the biG-hearted police justice
who had no alternative but II carry out the
law. The woman was charged with lar
ccny Of The milk, which had been placed
on the doorstep of a customer of the
Richmond Butter, Milk and Cream Com
pany.
The testimony showed that the milk
had been taken for nourishment for the
woman'S i'll child, bat the justice could
not recognize this as a defense in behalf
the accused. and he ordered that she be
placed in jail for fifteen days. Messrs.
Harry c. Smith and Matthew +. Maury
prepared an application for pardon and
took it to the office Of Governor Tyler.
The Governor instantly signed the paper
and the woman was released from custody.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1900-12-11
EXECUTIVE SESSION,
Senate Considered Hay-faunceiote
Treaty.
(By Associated Prcss.)

WASHINGTON, Dec 1o-'rhe Senate
spent almost five hours to-day i'll eNecu-
tive session. considering the llay-Paunce-
fote treaty There were i've or SIX
speeches made.
Senator Morgan elaborated somewhat
ms position as to the effect OF the cay
ton-Birlwer treaty He took issue Wrlh
Senator Teller as to the purpost OF the
first clause of that treaty. claiming INA,
it applied only to Great Britain ri5ht
to fortify the Nicaragua Canal itself
Mr. Teller repeated his declaration tha1
the United States should construct the
canal if at all, regardless OF the EnsNsh
position and without gong through 'he
farmality of ratifying the pending treaty
During. the day speeches we're nlaae os
Senators Money, Stewart, Frye, ana
others
Senator Stewart announced mat he was
for the treaty without amendment, and
Serator Money that he was against the
treaty in any form He wanted the calii'1
b,.ilt as much as any Senator could, ne
said. but he considered the pending treaty
nothing less than an insult to the m
telligence OF the American people
The possibility OF Secretary ttaS re-
signing, in case the ForelSn Reialioiis
Committee amendment to h1e treaty
should prevail, having been alluded 10
Senator Frye said he was IN position &c
make the official denial of that repreSen-
tasiye. Secretary Hay had no such IN
tCntion.