Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1900-03-22
Told in Secret Session
Bachelor Girls Confession Club
Discusses Frauds.
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TIL Bachelor Girls Confession
Club were holding an important
meeting behind closed doors. The sub
ject of the evenings discussion had
been announced by mail to each mem
Der. 1t was FRAUDS That I Have Per-
petrated."
After seeing that all windows and
doors were carefully closed the Chinese
joss sticks were lighted and the pres
ident called the meeting to order.
This being strictly secret session"
she said, sit is possible for us to dis
cuss this somewhat delicate subject
freely and without reserve. We are all
aware that many crises arise in every
life when it is necessary to resort to
deception or fraud-unconscious per-
haps-"
Not always unconscious" said the
Fashion Illustrator, looking at some
pictures she had just done, labeled,
''The Newest Thing in Opera Cloalzs.' -
There are times when we deliberately
plan and execute successful frauds.
We deliberately determine to deceive
A low murmur of indignation swept
the meeting like an electric vibration.
II see that you all look indignant, -
she went on, "but that also is fraud,
for you know in your hearts that not
one of us is entirely TRUTHFUL
''Will the member please speak for
herself?" suggested the girl who
taught Sunday school, somewhat
stif1y.
For instance" went on the Fashion
illustrator, chow many of you have
never used face powder? All who never
used even an Gently teenty dab raise
their right hands,
There was dead silence. Not a
hand was raised. The president saw
an opportunity for sensation. ''How
many of you," she said, sternly and
tensely, deepening her voice to an i'm
pressive whisper, 'have not at this
moment powder puffs concealed in
your pocketbooks and elsewhere?"
There was another silence, so thick
that you could almost see it, until the
Typewriter Girl relieved the situation.
"Then there are pin curls and puffs
and switches," she said, land padded
gowns. We are all more or less guilty
of some form of fraud or deception.
We are worse than men, for all our
frauds are small ones. There never
was a really great woman criminal!"
She said this almost with regret, as
though it were something that would
have added distinction to the sex.
'How about Lucretia Borgia and
Catherine of Russia and-and-" began
the Girl Librarian.
''Simple forms of hysteria," said the
Schoolteacher; "their crimes were all
inspired by men and perhaps aided and
abetted by them. They were the result
of love, jealousy or pique, but you can
not find in the pages of history one
genuinely magnificent woman Grim
inal!'
The girls looked rather relieved at
this and the Newspaper Girl arose.
1--WE can never learn to lie as we'll as
men do" she said, regretfully; 81 know
I've tried hard to become as proficient
as lots of men know, but can't get
the style and grace that they put into
ie.'
II distinctly recollect telling one
about my age" said the Typewriter
Girl. The members groaned in unison,
and some one brought out box of
chocolate peppermints and passed it
silently.
''We were averaging up the age of
the graduating GLASS;" went on the
Typewriter Girl, land of course each
girl took off at least four years.
Il can recollect that" said the Fluffy
Girl, who had been in the same class.
II was always dreadfully bad at fig
ures; couldn't add two and two with
out a pad and pencil, The professor
knew this and Unchanged his ques-
ton when he came to me and threw
out all my calculations. He. asked
all the other girls: ''How old are:
your" s'I.Ss& ai.., a.. 4. IA
'And we allied promptly and eas.
ily,' said the Typewriter Girl, sand he,
knew it, but it was good for the col
lege to have such young class