The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1900-08-10
Exiles in a Far Land

~ two young persons, man and wife,
living comfortably in Washington, de-
cided about two months ago that Wash
ington was not of sufficient size for
them. Likewise, they mutually con-
cluded that Washington was slow.
Furthermore, it struck them both at
one and the same time that there didn't
seem to be "anything doing" in Wash
ington, and the male person of the
couple referred to the capital of the
nation as a burg of no speed whatso-
ever worth mentioning and alluded to
it in caustic terms as being all right
in it's way, but Sleepy Hollow at that
in all of which the wife of his BOSOM
coincided with him.
''All of which," said the male person
of the couple, NATURALLY leads up to"
New York, of course" replied the
wife of his bosom.
Whereupon, after patronizing their
Washington friends whole lot, in
deed, and telling their Washington
friends that they were sorry to leave
them behind in poky old place that
y
ton, and declaring in loud and specific
terms, subject to no misconstruction
whatsoever, that New York would be
good enough for them for the remain
der of their natural lives, they depart
ed for New York. AS they sped out Of
the station on the train they reviled
Washington unto each other and re-
marked that Washington wouldn't do,
and that they were tickled almost fool
ish at the prospect of arriving within
a matter of five hours or 10 at point
where they would have every oppor-
tunity to get run for their money.
Arrived in New York, this pair of
Westinghouse, man and wife, hest
tated not to express themselves as be-
ing deliriously happy.
Its the only town, amt it?" said
the male person, beaming upon the
wife of his bosom.
1.-THE only town." she echoed.
Look at this blaze of lights" said
the male person, pointing his cane at
the bulb-electric sign over the Broad
way pugilists' saloons and the Broad
way restaurateurs' polite-robbery es-
tablishments; ''don't see blaze of lights
like this down in little old Washing
ton, do you? Real thing, this, isn't it
Plenty of action here, isn't there?"
'Oh, lots" replied the wife of his
bosom.
''Great to be in the madding crowd
once again, isn't it?" he went on,
pointing out the surging throngs OF
beautifully dressed bunco steerers and
other promoters rushing hither and
yon in their anxiety to nail 'good
things" in advance of each other
Don't see people like this in the little
old place down there, do you?"
NO." she replied with so much con.
viction, as it were, that he had to look
at her closely to see if she were really
enjoying herself.
'Clever bunch, aren't they?" said
the male person of the couple when
they took their first table d'hote dinner
atthe Blue Dog restaurant, pointing out
the disheveled artists, the gay and glad
some shoe clerks, the ladies with great
SORROWS and futures behind them (not
to speak of their prismatic hair and
their ineradicable complexions), the
imaginative and imaginary writer's
who toll not, neither do they spin; the
pale versifiers with T. Chattertor
make-ups, against whom Ito hear the
r. Chattertons) all publishers are
]eagued in one vast, cruel conspiracy;
the ''alienist" physicians, whose prac'
tice consists in the writing of LON.
brosoistic vaporings for the New York
Sunday saffrons, and all the rest of the
merry, mirthful, Observation-Disclosures
iuk-on-the-side ''Bohemians" (tortured
word). Free, flowing, unconventional
natures4they have, haven't they? They
put away the petty restraints of civil.
ization al If the restraints were not
you perceive. Childish, bland, brilliant
lot, hey? Don't see folks like them
down in the little old place On the
Potomac, do you?"
M" replied the wife Of his bosom
with an accent so clear. and distinct
that he had to look at her again il
order to, ascertain, If possible, if sht
were really, entering into the jovial
happy-go-lucky spirit Of the occasion
II wouldn't be back in Washington
for; big money, would YOUR he in
quired, in order to force her to put her
self on record once more. u -,
"Er-no," she replied, in a tone that
didn't seem to have any vast amount Of
heartiness behind it. +, -,
"Of course, though" she said, after
awhile, with. a torefnger placed q bit
wistfully to her lip: washington
looks beautiful at this season, doesn't
t?'' ~
20. yer" said he, deprecatingly; cts
YrsttY enough little old place
.S.5s 49,;