The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1900-09-29
WAR TO THE DEATH.
Man snd Fly in Elemental
Chances Even rs to b
Outcome.

US and Jul children? VIII there ever
come a day when the rubber band vii.
snap on the wall for the last time, and
the resulting splash be glassed over
with a label pasted on the under side
reading: Here persisted the last wild
fly. July S. lg-?" Science shakes her
head moodily. Pressed for a categor-
ioal answer, she says something about
screens, hearing which the housewife
smacks her hands together and let's
them fall despairingly into her lap.
"~Screens?" she groans. Screens!
Haven't 1 got screens up all over the
house? And just look at it! Just look
at that chandelier! You know it never,
never will come off brass. I'd like to
know where they get in at. I'd just like
to know" And then she takes a paper
in each hand and flaps it and makes I'M
graceful leaps up to knock the impu-
dent beasts from the ceiling. She drives
them out into the dining-room and
thence out into the kitchen, and so on
into the open air. The flies scurry and
dodge and flee back On n side OF the
room while she is battling on the other.
They get their breath back and ready
for another run, but she has no rest,
writes Harvey Sutherland, in Ainslee's.
After she has wrought herself into a
gasping perspiration and shut the
house all up there are just as many
flies as before stippling the chandelier
and buzzing: "A-a-ah! Did you ever
get left?"
She tries this paper that you soak
in a saucer of water and sweeten to
taste. The saucers ornament the par
lor center table, the sewing machine
and the shelf over the sink. Total NOR
tally for the week, eight flies. Pussy
experiments with the liquid, and the
children dig a grave in the back yard,
and Kenneth borrows his papa's night
shirt for a surplice in which to officiate
at the obsequies.
She tries sticky ~fy-paper. That
catches a great many at first. 1t is
really good sport to watch if you are
fond of tying firecrackers to dogs and
doing up the cats feet in papers. When
the lure is first spread out and a fly
sees its moist glitter and says to itself:
"Taffy! Me for that! I could just live
on taffy." He alights. 1t does not taste
as good as it looks-no flavor to it.
He thinks he might as we'll go some
where else.
"Oh. stay awhile" says the fiy-paper.
NO" says the fly. ~ got a date with
a teller. Let 60"
"Oh, what's your hurry" coaxes the
fy-paper.
"Quit your foolin'," commands the
fly. II gotta go. Let 60 now!" The fly
is getting angry. but the paper pre-.
serves its temper.
"Oh, I wouldn't be in q rush. You got
al the time they is"
"Leggo now! Leggc O. me! Leggo!
Teacher! Make him let me bel" and
then il begins to scream and fight. 1t is
most entertaining to watch the tragedy
if you are of a vindictive and revenge
full spirit. The poor creature strug-
giles and struggles, each effort bringing
nearer the moment when it shall sink
to rise no more. The humans giggle
greedily. "Christians to the lions!"
cried the mob in Nero's day. Files to
the sticky paper!" cry the moderns.
One poor fellow near the edge, with
supermuscan strength drags himself
free to the plain paper. and as he pauses
for breath ere he can plume his gummy
wings for flight, Kenneth catches him
and thrusts him back into his doom.
Mothers and fathers of America. con.
slider what must be the mora! influence
of sticky fy-paper upon your sons and
daughters. What boots it if you teach
them the sublime truths embodied in:
81 love little Pussy, her coat is so warm.
And if I don't hurt her she'll do me nc
HARM"
so long as you yourselves set the ex'
ample Of laughing at the miseries OF
helpless creatures whose only fault il
a weakness for drowning in the cream
pitcher?
But by and by the word seems to be
passed around: Beware yon glitter.
ing ~expanse," and then. put the fy-pa'
per where you may, seldom, very sci
dom, hear the sharp note of some spent
buzzer in his agony. Sticky f1y-paper
too, has a way of curling up and o.
Hopping, sticky side to. on things ant
persons. and in such cases it is a very
unfunny affair. Alcohol viii dissolve
the gum if you should happen to come
downstairs in the dark and knock of
the fly-paper and step on it with you
bare feet. 1 tried alcohol. and it tool
the stuff right off. thought you might
like to know. l was going to try kero
sene, but it was in the c%ellarway.
1t Made Him Weary.
do you drink" asked the woman
at the door.