davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
QUEER WEDDING PRESENTS.
Gifts That Were Not Appreciated by
Those who Received Them.

Even at n marriage feast, as it
seems, there will sometimes be the en-
vious or the Jealous or the malicious.
A well known author received from
a rival man of letters scrapbook con-
tanning a collection of all the adverse
criticisms his works had ever received,
while a popular artist was presented
with a set of elementary works upon
self instruction in drawing and paint
ing.
Not long since a gentleman who is n
passionate devotee Of hunting received
as bridal gift from an anonymous
donor n complete set of false limbs, q
set of artificial teeth and q couple of
glass eyes-the whole Of which must
have cost a considerable sum-accom-
panied by note, the writer of which
trusted that, by reason of the recipi-
ent's many falls while following the
hounds, some or all of these substitutes
would ultimately prove of use.
An elderly, crusty tradesman, on
espousing a spinster Of mature age,
was presented by London undertaken
with two collins for himself and wife,
(which, unlike most of the other offer
ings you will receive, are sure to be
Of service" The bridegroom resented
this singular If useful gift, and 1t took
all the efforts of mutual friends to
prevent breach of the peace.
Equally vexatious was the gift re-
ceived from his neighbors by an in
firm octogenarian who welded n pleas
ure loving woman more than 80 years
his Junior. 1t was a large brass cage,
''intended"-so ran the subscribers
note-"to restrain the Maynard flights
of giddy young wife who has mar
ried a decreplt old fool for his money"
The husband Of lady whose great
beauty hardly atoned for her sharp
tongue found among his wedding pres
ents n scold's bride or branks, gift
from his wlfe's sisters, with the hope
that, "if Kate makes your life as I'M
bearable as she has made ours, you
will not hesitate to put the accompany
ing offering to its original scion
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
THE FARMERS PROSPER.
Figures Proving That Good Times Have
Come to the Men On the Farms.

Figures Proving That Good Times Have
Come to the Men On the Farms.
The American Agriculturist will
hardly be accused of being a partisan
publication. 1t is one Of the oldest, as
well as most substantial of the period
icals devoted to the interests of the
farmers, and whatever appears in its
columns is worthy of credence and
consideration. In the issue Of this
magazine for March II. 1900, an arti-
Gle appeared which gives very clearly
the condition of the farmer today as
compared with his condition during
the years of Democratic suprem.
acy in the '9Os. These figures were in
most part derived from sources which
the AGriculturist vouches for as accu.
rate. The editor INDUCED in little in
dependent investigation along these
lines and from answers from a list of
many hundred correspondents, In
whom he placed great faith, he de-
rived the figures which he gives in the
article from which we condense the
following:
The advance in farm values In the
United States In the year 1900 as COM
pared with the years Of Democratic de-
preston, 1896, is shown by the fol-
lowing figures:
Gain in value live stock. .SG9S, OO0. 600
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
Robbed the Grave.

A startling incident, of which Mr..
john Oliver, of Philadelphia, was the
subject, is narrated by him rs follows:
81 was in most dreadful condition.
My skin was almost yellow, eyes sunken
tongue coated, pain continually in back
aud sides, 10 appetite-gradually grow
ing weaker day by day. Three physi-
clans had given me up Fortunately u
friend advised trying Electric Bitters;'
and to my great JOY and surprise, the
first bottle made II decided improve.
ment. continued their use for three
weeks, and am now a well man. |
know they saved my life, and robbed
the grave of another victim" No one
should fail TO try them. Only Scots,
guaranteed, at A. II. Roberts drug
store.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
Was In the business.


It was on a Seventh street car that q
we'll dressed man carried his hand to
his jaw now and then and uttered a
stified groan. After a bit fellow pas
senger had his curiosity aroused and
brusquely queried:
"Toothache"
"Yes."
"Tve been there and know all about
1t. If she's boiler and has the jumps.
1t amt no use fooling around. What
you want to do is to go to dentist"
"Um! Jerusha, but how 1t aches"
"Go right to the dentist and have 1t
yanked out. Man with the toothache
always feels little scared about hav-
ing it yanked, but that's all imagina-
ton, you know"
"Td rather be shot" groaned the suf-
ferer.
"Oh, pshaw! Go to some dentist
who gives laughing gas. He'll give you
your knowing 1t. / pledge you my
word that 1t won't hurt any more than
pairing off a finger nall"
"Um! What a liar! G'way from
mew
"why, man, l pledge you my word
that you'll never
Don't talk to me! know all about
1t! I've been a dentist myself for the
last 10 years"
"Oh, you havew growled the other
as he backed away. well, that's diff
ferent. 1t will not only seem to you as
II your blamed old head was being
pulled off your shoulders, but your jaw
will ache two weeks after, and I'm
burned glad Of it toov'-Washington
Post.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

The editor of the Agriculturist turns
from these figures, showing the pros
porous condition of the farmers, to an,
Other line of argument. which is also
very telling one. He takes up the
question of farm mortgages and he
finds that 10 years ago the farms of
the United States were encountered
to the amount of $1,OS6, 100000. This
year this large amount has been re-
duced to $S00,O00,OOO. In 1890 the av-
erage size Of each mortgage was
$1,224. In 1900 the average size was
$1,000. In 1890 IA per cent of these
mortgages We're for purchase price
and improvements, the rate of interest
was 6.3 per cent and the percentage
of value of the farms mortgaged was
80. This year IS per cent Of the mort
cages are for purchase price and i'm.
provements, the rate has declined to G
fiat, and only u per cent of the value
covered by mortgage. These figures
are undoubtedly as nearly correct as
it Is possible to obtain. They were
gathered, as stated above, by period
ical which is non-partisan and the re-
suits given were not shaded in favor
Of either party. That they indicate,
however, large gain In all that
goes to make for the prosperity of the
farmer is fact, and one which should
call the attention Of the people bene-
flied to their duty to vote the Repub.
iican ticket.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
He Grnbbed the OGer.

Ex-Governor George W. Peck OF
Wisconsin, author of "Peck's Bad
Boy" was running a little country
weekly In the pineries In the early six
ties. 1t was an unimportant sheet
save for one column Of jokes which
Peck wrote each week. This depart
ment caught the eye Of "Brick" Pom
eroy, who was then printing his Dem
ocrat In Lacrosse, Wis, and one day
he wrote to Peck asking him whether
he would be willing to go down to La
crosse and work for The Democrat at
$50 week.
Three days later Mr.. Pomeroy got
this telegram: Il accept your offer
quicker thar instantly. For heavens
sake don't withdraw itw
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

A certain minister during his dis
course one Sabbath morning said, I'm
each blade of grass there is sermon"
The following day one Of his flock
discovered the good man pushing q
lawnmower about his yard and paused
to say, "Well. parson, Pm glad to see
you engaged in cutting your sermons
shortw-Chicago News.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
That ThIobbing Headache.

Would quickly leave YOU, if you used
DIR. Kings New Life Pills. Thousands
of sufferers have proved their match
less merit for Sick and Nervous Head
aches. They make pure blood and
strong nerves and build up your health.
Easy to take. Try them. Only 25cts
Money back If not cured. Sold by
A. ii. Roberts, Druggist.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

81 wonder what's the matter with
Willie jenkins? He's been getting into
all sorts Of mischief Of late, especially
Thursday afternoons"
"Oh, that's easily explained. That's
the afternoon Mrs. Jenkins goes to n
mothers meeting to discuss the proper
method of child education and disci-
pline."-Chicago Post
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
VIOLIN AND SONG.
He'd nothing but his violin,

He'd nothing but his violin,
I'd nothing but my song,
But we were wed when skies were blue
And summer days were long. d
And when We rested by the hedge
The robins came and told
How they had dared to WOO and win !.
When early spring was cold. = :
We sometimes supped on dewberres -
Or slept among the hay,
But oft the farmers wives at eve :
Game out to hear US play -;
The rare old tunes, the dear old tunes; -,
We could not starve for long,
While my man had his violin
And l my sweet love song.
The world has aye gone we'll with US, O..
Old man, since we were one; !
Our homeless wandering down the lanes, p
1t long ago was done.
But those who wait for gold or gear,
For houses and for kline,
Till youths sweet spring grows brown and
scar
And love and beauty tine
Win never know the Joy of hearts
That met without a fear
When you had but your violin
And q song, my dear.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

At Sheffield, England. recently Gu
rious accident occurred. passenger
was riding ON a double deck electrical
car, and single deck car passed In the
opposite direction. The rope Of the
trolley boom of the latter was flying
In the wind, and it wound itself around
the passengers neck. Fortunately he
had the presence of mind to seize the
rope with both hands and release him
self or he would probably have been
pulled from the car.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

On the edge Of the world lie, lie,
Happy and dying and dazed and poor,
Looking up from the vast great floor
OF the infinite world that rises above
To God and TO faith and to love, love, Lowell
What words have to that world to speak,
Old and weary and dazed and weak,
From the very low to the very high?
Only this, and this is all:
From the fresh green soil to the wide blue sky
From greatness to WEAKNESS. life TO death,
One God have we on whom to call,
One great bond from which none can fall;
Love below, which is life and breath,
And Love above, which sustaineth all.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
Preferred to Have Her Talk.

They were exchanging "reminiscences
of a pleasant evening.
"And what did your wife say when
you got home" asked one.
Nothing" answered the other.
Nothing? Well, you were in luck"
"Oh. don't know. I'd rather dodge
words than some other things."--New
York Mail and Express.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
Editors Awful Plight.

+. NJ. Higgins, Editor Seneca Ills,
aws was afflicted for years with Piles
tho doctor or remedy helped until
ried Bucklen's Arnica Salve. He
two boxes wholly cured him
surest Pile cure on earth and
salye in the world. Cure
'. Only 25 cents. Sold by
IS, druggist.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

Mrs. Bridget Flynn, wife of Peter
Flynn, died yesterday morning at their
home on Irish ridge in the edge of Shell
by county. She was rs years old. The
funeral is to be held here at the Catholic
ol,.,rnh
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
New Christian Church.

The foundation is now built and the
carpenter work has commenced. Those
who have pledged to the building fund
are now requested to leave the money
donated at the Corn Exchange bank or
hand it to J. II. McSparran, pastor.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

/ wish to thank those who so kindly
assisted me in procuring funds for the
operation on my eyes which was so sue.
cessful and which relieved me from great
suffering. LIZZIE WRIGHT.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

Hell know a man who would be
willing to give $1,000 to hear you sing.
She-Totally deaf, l presume?
He-Yes. And after he had heard
you he would give another thousand
dollars to be deaf again. imagine.
This fable for ladies teaches that the
easiest way to iirritate the gentleman
to whom one may be married Is to
guess his joke sin advance.-Indianap.
oils Press.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

For some reason the man who has
no money to buy food Is never seized
with desire to acquire fame by break
ing all records for fasting.-Atchison
Globe
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
DISTRICT MEETINGS.
Weaver Announces Meetings

Chairman Weaver Announces Meetings
with Party Workers.
Chairman Weaver will meet the con.
gressional and county committeeman
in the different districts as follows
this week:
Fifth district-Cedar Rapids, Aug. ID.
Seventh Des Moines, Aug. IA.
Second-Davenport, Aug. 10.
State meeting-Des Moines, Aug. II.
First district-Burlington Aug. IS.
Meetings will be held in the other
districts later.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

The GLOWING letters remain unclaim.
in the Audubon postotfice for the week
ending Aug. 10 1900 Oscar Ward and
Louis Hochstresser.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
Total advance. .S4,219, 900, 900

Total advance. .S4 219, 000, 900
The above figures show that the pro-
duce of farms of the United States in
the year 1899 realized to the farmers
$1,600,00O,000 more than in any
of the years 1896. The farm values
for the 1899 are given as follows:
Land, buildings, etc. .S14. 800, OOO, 900
Live stock. 2,55S,OOO,0 900
improvements and ma
chinery .............. 100000, 900
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

Any coal sold by Musson Il Son must
be paid for before it leaves the scale, un-
less satisfactory arrangements are made
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

We have special campaign rates on
the State Register, both daily and
weekly. II.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
To Swallow His own Advice.

II had horrible dream last night"
said Huddleston when he came down
to breakfast the other morning.
"What was itP asked his wife.
II dreamed that was In purgatory
and was made to do all the things l
had told my friends would do II I
were In their places. Life.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

Willie Harvey, Art Harvey's little boy,
was slightly stunned Saturday p. m. by
a stroke of lightning.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

Gain in raluc staple crops. 401, 100000 |
Gain in value live stock
products. 100000, 000 |
Gain in value other prod
ucts. ................ 100000, 600
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
,tal ST., 55S, 600, OOO

Total .$17, 55S, 900, 900
The total of these items in the Dem
ocratic year 1895 was $14,2GO, OOO, 900
and the highest previous figure
reached was in 1889, when the total
was $15,9S4, 100000.
The total value of the farm prod
ucts for the year 1900 is estimated as
follows:
staple crops. ....... 81, 1S0,OOO,OOO
Live stock products. 1900, 900
Other products ......... 1.OO0,OO0,0O0
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

Ask Frick for New York Life Cigar
best 8 cent cigar sold. II.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

In Portugal married. women retain
their maiden names.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

The prices received by the farmers
per head for live stock in 1900 COM
pared with the lowest point since
1892, which was during the years of
Democratic depression, is shown in
the following table:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
Total 81, 4S0, 900, 900

In 1895 the total of these items
amounted to $500, 100000 or nearly
$1,O00,O00,000 less than this year. In
1880, when prosperous times were at
their height, previous to the present,
these totals amounted to $4,241, OOO,-
600.
The Agriculturist then compares the
value of the staple crops in the years
Of depression with those of the year
ending December, 1899, and the show
ing is as follows:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

Illinois coal at Musson's at $500 per
ton
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

Total gain. .......... 81, 600 100000
Gain in real estate. .... 50, $50, 100000
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16
Sand for Sale.

Delivered in town one dollar per yard
U. CHAS. TRAMP.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-16

December, 1894
I" December, 1895.
go December, 1898.
The value of live stock in 1896 and
in 1900 is compared by the Agricul-
turlst as follows:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-23
(To be Continued.)
THE NEW WOMAN.

She Is Capable of Doing Many Things
An exchange says in relation to the
new woman:
What in the world is there that the
end-of-the-century young woman does
not do-eXcepting household work?
She is physician. She is a surgeon.
She is a trained nurse, and does not
shrink from following the Red Cross
to the front in the tumult of war She
is a farmer. She is a stock raiser,
and an expert in cattle and horse flesh.
She is a stenographer. She is an ex-
pert bookkeeper. She keeps store-all
kinds of stores, including butchers
and grocers'. She conducts and owns
hotels. She is a dentist. She is hair
dresser. She is barber. She still ex-
cells at her old trade of dressmaking
and hat trimming, although curiously
enough, the ex-tyrant, man, has gone
into both of these formerly exclusively
feminine fields, by way of revenge,
presumably, and has also competed
with her and beaten her all hollow at
NoShihS. SOOhtly Win NOlldH Was d
plain, practical matter. Man has made
of it an art and science, and now, at
the eleventh hour, woman lecturers
are going about the country instruct
ing their sisters in the new cookery.
The great success, in point of attend
ance, of the classes conducted by these
ladies shows that woman is making
desperate effort to retrieve her lost
ground in what is to a great many of
her sex-and this statement is set
down with regret, but it is none the
less true-a lost art. The piano, the
violin, culture blue stockings and
aspirations have played the mischief
with a woman as a cook. and in spite
of all the lectures and all the schools
and all the practical demonstrations, it
is to be doubted whether woman will
ever retrieve her lost ground in the
Kitchen"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-23

To the Farmers Review: Every per-
son engaged in farming should keep
from two to six cows. They should be
as near pure-bred Shorthorn, Hereford
or Polled-Angus stock as possible, and
they should always be bred to a regis
tered bull. We let our calves suck the
cows, allowing them to take about
two-thirds of the milk from their
mothers twice day, morning and
evening, until they are five or six
months old. We give them the run OF
the grass lot at the same time. We
have our cows come fresh about March
or April and aim to keep them milking
ten or eleven months, thinking 1t
better for the cows and the calves
they carry, that the cows be allowed
to go dry for about two months. In
the spring we feed our cows fodder in
boxes placed in the barn lot. The
feeding is done in the day time. Dur
ing bad days and always at night we
tie the cows in the barn In their stalls
and feed them clover hay with about
ten ears of corn each. II our corn Is
dry and hard, we grind it cob and all
and feed the meal with about one-third
the bulk of wheat bran mixed with 1t.
We give our cows at all times the run
of blue grass pasture, and when the
grass gets good and plentiful We
shorten up on the meal and hay. We
SOW a patch of corn to feed in August
and September, while the pastures are
dried up. We put our ground in or
der for this patch Of feed just the same
as If We were going to sow wheat or
oats. We sow it with the wheat drill,
the same as we sow oats. 1t makes
more and better feed to the acre than
anything else We have tried. We cut
and feed it as needed AS the stalks
are small the cows eat it with a relish.
To get the best results from your
cows and calves they should never be
permitted to go hungry.-S. Garinger,
Fayette County. Ohio.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-23

Gama-grass (Tripsacum dacty,oides)
is perennial growing throughout the
southern states and north to Connec-
ticut, Pennsylvania, southern Illinois
and Kansas Formerly it was rather
common in the South, but it has been
largely killed out by close grazing.
The roots are numerous, deep and
stout, and would require two or three
spans of horses to pillow them up. The
grass grows in large clumps, a char.
acter that interferes with its use as
hay unless the punches are close
enough together to form continuous
sod. The stalks and leaves are quite
coarse, the former growing several
feet high and being as much as half
an inch in diameter The leaves are
broad, somewhat resembling corn
leaves. The flowers are borne at the
top of the stalk in two or three sien-
der spikes. four to eight inches long.
The lower parts of these produce the
seeds. At maturity the lower part OF
each spike breaks up into joints, each
joint containing a seed. II cut before
the fower-stalks are produced the hay
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-08-23
CHAPTER V

The blazing heat of a sultry Egyp-
much as possible by ingenious ar
rangements of softly moving fans and
waving curtains. An elegant apart
ment, furnished after European style,
and with every sign of wealth and
luxury around. And two people sit
ting together, talking very earnestly
and in low tones a man and a
woman.
The man, looking many years older
than when we saw him last, though
only two years have actually passed.
whose bronzed face wears an anxious
and serious expression, is Paul Gle
land; and the woman, whose dark,
rich beauty, soft liquid eyes and ex-
quisitely nodded figure, gowned in
some CONNECTION" from Paris, have
already won for her a conspicuous
place in the European society of Cairo,
is the widow of wealthy government
official, and has, since her husbands
| death, lived with her brother, Colonel
Beauchamp, one of the most gallant
officers who had gone through the ter
rible campaign of 1885.
A soft-foOted native servant had
just brought in the afternoon cup of
tea, retiring as silently as he had en-
| tered; and the two were too deeply en-
| crossed in conversation even to notice
| that.
Il trust matters may not be so bad
as the Colonel makes out. Mrs. Breyn-
ton" Paul Cleland was saying. These
| turbulent Arabs seem to require a lit
tie blood-letting now and then; but
they are no match for European SOL
diery. The affair cannot be more
| than a mere skirmish at most"
Adrienne Breynton's soft eyes met
Cleland's face for a moment, and then
suddenly dropped.
you do not know the fantastic der
wish as | do" she said, and her voice
was one of the sweetest ever woman
possessed. There is nothing in all
the world will make men fight like
religious zeal, Doctor Cleland, and
they are intoxicated with it. They
fight like men inspired. All, I have
reason to know how they fight"
She sighed, but there was not any.
thing deeper than a gentle regret in
the sigh. Cleland had heard the story
Of how Oscar Breynton had been
hewed to pieces in mistake for an OBJ.
noxious officer by horde of shrek.
ing, half-mad Arabs; but he had also
heard how his wife. beautiful and
good as she was, had been strangely
neglected by Breynton for years, and
he guessed that her grief must have
been less than her horror at his ter
rible death.
"Our cause is one Of justice and oil