The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1900-12-30

MANS LITTLE WAYS.
ia ARIA" said Mr.. shufHebotham
wi 'Tet US take a whack at writins

that play Of mine this evening.
| Ancient founts OF inspiration well to-
night through all my being. feel as If
I can do a whole act. Stay with me
while write. VIII you. where I can
! look up and see you? Woman's gentle
presence inspires man to lofty
thought
Yes, Thomas. that's what you say
/ always in the woman's page Of The
Elevator. And I have read how Mrs.
! Gladstone was the aid and counsel of
her husband during his whole career,
and how Lady Tennyson, too. devoted
her life to Alfred and did everything
for him, so he could be free 10 take
walks Of six hours over the heath with
his young lady secretary and draw in
spiration from nature. So would TOO
help you with your immortal task"
Hint Yes. just so. Did you have
the typewrtting machine put IN order,
and have you practieed on it till you
can write as fast as dictate?'
Yes, dear"
Did you get ten reams Of that par
ticular gray tinted paper on which
like best to express my thoughts?"
| yes, dear"
Then write:
q Evelina-Monster Leer not upon
me with that gloating smile 1 DEFY
/ yen Maria, why in heavens name
can't you make those children be quiet
/ A literary man ought never to marry.
Domestic life stultihes his gifts. There s
/ that demonish creak againi Why must
| the children creak when I want TO
write?"
Maria goes to the staircase and calls:
You Adoniram Judson and you Babe
/ and Tottyi I've told you a thousand
times that when your father is in the
house you are not 30 step upon that
/ board which creaks. You are 70 tiptOe
around it. Do you hear2 Tiptoe
around it, co to bed this minute, every
| one of you, and don't give a squeak"
! There is silence. Again Mr.. Shuttle
botham gathers up his thoughts that
! breathe and words that burn. de die
| tates:
'Frederico-Sweet vision Of my
dreams, spurn me not because spIurge
not as do the ice cream knights who
dance attendance upon bargain sale
rugs at thy feet How's that, Maria ?"
Thomas, it is immortal"
yes Maria, but I'm doubtful wheth-
er to say as do ice cream knights or
as ice cream knights do
ooh, I see, Tom. You mean that as it
stands it is not quite clear whether the
sweet vision is to do the ice cream
knights or whether the ice cream
knights do her"
Nav, I don't mean that at all. A
woman's brain lacks reasoning power.
This is It: Shall I say, 'Splurge as ice
cream knights do or 'Splurge as do ice
cream knights?' The last sounds more
heavily. tragiclil1e and dramatic. But
look into Usage of Best Writers and
Speakers In Disputed Questions of
Grammar and see just how it is.
can't be worried with fool things like
that They break my ideas and ruin
the rhythm of my thought"
Maria took down the weighty tome
and pIodded through the authorities
Mr.. Shuflebotham closed his eyes and
smoked. He was concentrating. Pres
entity he opened his eyes.
Maria. did you write to Washington
to see if any idiot had copyrighted the
Yes dear
Did you translate that passage from
thel French where I said I wanted to
give the thing a touch Of Moliere?"
yes, dear"
That's right. That kind of thing you
can do very wei. The light and flexible
female brain can render readily the
thoughts that men have uttered, but it
cannot originate for itself Oh, say.
Mariat"
Yes. Mr. Shuff1ebOtham."
did you count the words on every
page Of that last act I dictated to you ?
/ haven't time for the fool things, you
know"
Yes. Thomas. I did"
Then. Maria. wish you'd make me
q cup Of coffee. BE sure to have il
without any grounds, so it viii clear
my thoughts. While 7 drink il open the
windows and let the fresh air flow in 70
give me inspiration. And just 20 up
stairs. viii you. and wake up Adoniram
Judson and tell him to stop snoring
He drives me crazy After that I think
I can go on again"