Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1900-07-23

Sue; he swore the twins were beauti-
full and wished he had two-but that
don't count. He talked about the corn
bread which he vainly tried to chew
and forthwith begged for the recipe
of course that tickled ma---but that
don't count. But just before he left
he stopped and winked, and closed
his jaw, and slipping out behind the
barn he took q drink with pa and
that's what counts!'
o
Much has been said about the
heavy losses of English officers In the
South African war" said an old sol
der the other day. ~ have noticed
the returns, of the English war Office
particularly and although they show
heavy losses of officers, they are not
nearly so large as those suffered by
the union army during the late war
The records of the English war Office
show that 21,403 non-commissioned
officers and men were killed in action,
while the casualties among the officers
were 254, one officer to 81 men,, This
Is heavy loss but is far from equal
ing the proportionate loss of officers
and men in our Civil war. The re-
cords show that we lost 103,705 men
in action, while our loss of officers was
6,365, one officer to 16 men, more than
FIVE times the loss of the English.
The Boer has the reputation of being
a good soldier and fine shot, but he
fell far short Of the American soldier
i'm picking off officers. However, had
the fighting in Africa been at as close
range as It was i'm America, the re-
suit doubtless would have been differ
ent.' II should be taken into consid
era ton, however, that our war lasted
nearly five times as long as the one
| In South Africa.
She was calling on her neighbor.
The usual category of gossipy topics
had been exhausted and the CONVERSE
ton took culinary turn. Numerous
delicacies were discussed and new
tangled dishes suggested. Finally the
hostess told her friend of some deli
cious fruit gelatine she had made. OF
She would try it the very next day.
/
The lady of the house kindly furnished
the needed information and It pro-
vided for certain amount of gelatine.
II always use Plymouth Rock gelatlne,'
said the hostess. You can easily re-
member that. Just think of Plymouth
Rock chickens Y know" The caller
charged her mind with the gelatine
with the chicken name. The next
morning she visited her grocer, or
dered her usual allowance and started
to go. Before she reached the door
she suddenly stopped and turned back
"Oh, yes" she exclaimed to the clerk
"send me up package of Brown
Leghorn gelatlne,' "A package OF
whatg" cried the clerk. Then that old
reliable second thought. which 80 OF
ten rcscues us from our difficulties
came to her and saved the day.
| O. ft..,
In one of Akron's large stores ar
erraud boy found life full of turmoil
by reason of the delight taken by
clerks in teasing the little fellow, wllc
was one of those Innocent creatures
not skilled In the art of taking hl'
own part" He took all jokes seri
ously, and great big tears would rol
down his cheeks when the clerks laugh
ed at him. Finally he walked up to the
employers desk, and announced: "rvs
got to give up either this store or Sun
day school, one of the two; | can
serve God and Mammon" He is mo-
now engaged In serving Mammon.
81 don't believe word of that max
i'm, IT'S an III wind that blows nobody
GOOD" said a pesslmistic man, on on,