Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1900-04-05
Family independent Politics Devoted Literature Local and General News
THURM0NT Frederick County, Maryland Thursday April g. 1900.
WHY HEDODGED WAR
ONCE WAS ENOUGH FOR THE
TRAVELLING MAN.
His Fourth Of July Experience With
Explosives In a Patriotic Pennsyl.
vania Town Convinced Him That
He Did Not Want to Go to War.

He Did Not Want to Go to War.
The travelingman who sells hard
ware remarked that he was afraid
that he would die of heart disease II
he was ever compelled to go to the
front. His friends wanted to know
what made him think SO, and after
lighting fresh cigar he said:
1T was several years ago that l
made up my mind never to go to war
unless there was great need of men
and my decision was not changed.
Business had been good with me,
and landing in certain Pennsylvania
town one Fourth, I determined to
take a day off and celebrate the day.
The result was that l walked over
half the place, attended a picnic In
the afternoon, danced until my feet
were weary and returned to the hotel
for dinner pretty well tired. So far
10 good, but l did not know where to
stop.
After dinner a man of my acquaint-
ance proposed that we go out to see
the fireworks and off we went deter
mined not to lose an hour of our holi-
day. The fireworks display was to
be on top of high hill, almost a
mountain, on the edge of the town,
and, as remember it now, that
hill went almost straight up and
down. We followed the big crowd,
though, and at last reached the top.
About every one in town was on the
summit of that hill before o'clock,
when the display was scheduled to
begin, and we were crowded and jost-
led on all sides.
"In due season some one put big
rocket in place and touched it off. 1t
started with a rush, rose high in the
air and exploded While the sparks
were falling all the women said 'Ah!
long drawn out and half the folk
crowded around to get better view.
There was a woman with big straw
hat right in front of me and l was
side stepping when there was roar
in the middle Of the platform where
the fireworks were lying. Before any
one knew what was wrong big sky.
rocket darted over the heads of
thousand or so spectators, so close
that they could feel the rush of air
following It.
"A moment later flOurpOt began to
spout Unexpectedly and seeing the
sparks falling all over the platform
most of the spectators decided that
it was time for them to go. Yours
truly was among the number.
started down the hill on run and
was soon making ten-foot jumps
Even then was only holding my own
with big fat woman just in front
of me and there were some in the
crowd who should have been handi-
capped to make anything like an
even race
1--WE made a quick trip, that is my
friend and myself, but the skyrockets
were going much faster. They kept
passing over our heads constantly and
once a big wheel Of some kind sailed
by me going toward the bottom Of the
hill like q runaway. About a hun
dred yards from the top Of the hill
there ran a stone wall perhaps four
feet high and some of the high-gear
Bprinters went bang into 1t. The men
and women who did not lose con.
sciousness groaned or screamed when
they struck 1t and hearing the uproar
in front of me I slowed up little and
then making out the fence through
the darkness vaulted over it with
sigh of relief.
But my troubles were not ended.
1t happened that husky ironworker
had chosen shelter behind the fence
lust when | went over and my feet
came down fairly in the middle of his
back when | landed. He started to
swear like q trooper and half rose to
give me a short swing when sky
rocket struck the top Of the wall i'm
mediately in front of him and stuck
there while 1t sent red and green balls
back up the hill in great shape.
That settled the ironworker. He
ducked down in hurry and before
he had time to think Of me again l
had rolled ten feet away and was
sticking to the leeward side of the
wall trying to keep my heart from
choking me. l succeeded, but 1t was
hard work, and 1t was really weeks
before the effects of my run and the
excitement had passed away.
"All the men and women who had
passed me in the stampede were
keeping as close to the wall as they
could, but there others coming and
the early arrivals had troubles OF
their own. Somehow l escaped, but
few of the others were so fortunate
The ironworker was a notable ex-
ample Less than ten seconds after
the heels of my patent feathers had
scraped along his back he suffered
another accident. This time he had
an encounter with man of near his
own weight who came over the fence
dragging small boy with him.
"They both landed on my would-be
antagonist and he gave a yell that
could be heard above the noise of the
explosions and the cries of those in
the crowd. Every one who could not
see him concluded that rocket had
struck him and the women and girls
screamed with renewed energy. No
sooner had the man and his boy made
their escape than two halfgrown girls
plunged over the wall and once more
the ironworker yelled. One had land
ed on his head and the other on his
outstretched arm. The ironworker
would have fought them, but no one
ventured to say word while he held
forth. He was marked man, though
and the persons near him made haste
to give him wide berth. They were
content that he should suffer alone.
Of course, there were other persons
trampled upon, but it seemed to me
that he had more than his share of
hard luck.
1.-THE next morning ] learned that
one young woman mad been killed by
a skyrocket, while several other per-
sons had been hurt. A one-legged tin
horn gambler was declared to be re-
sponsible for the premature explosion
of the fireworks. After lighting a
cigarette it was alleged he threw the
burning match into box of rockets
on the platform. | knew nothing
about the truth of this, but decided
that week to do a lot of dOdging