Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1900-04-14

the following week with Il shoe drum
mer and uevrr sent back the ring.
The New Suit-Rut surely you don't
despair! You will see as much of the
world as formerly. will you not?
The Old Suit-No; my happi"st hours
are over now. For IL time to come you
will do all The minglinG necessary, just
as | did when | was young and hand
some.
The New Suit-But our master re-
members you. doesn't he:
The Old Suit-Only when the tailor
who made me reminds him of my eX.
istence. When we lose our beauty we
are soon forgotten and neglected moth.
ing remains of us save an entry on the
tailor'S ledger and Il moss covered aud
unrccciptrd bill.
The New Suit-lm afraid You take n
pcssimistc view of everything, old
chap.
The Old Suit-PrrsSimistic. my boy;
prcSSimiStic is the word. I've been
pressed so often that all my original
lines of hrauty are lost. The crcascs
and crows feet of old age are over and
about me. I'm baggy knrcd. wrinkIed
up old has been. am being saved up
for Il rainy day-saved up for rainy
day. that's all.
The New Sut-Oh, but say. old
chap, you
The Old Suit-Thcre'S no Use talk.
ing, my boy; am older than you. and
l know from experience just what will
happen. You will be trottcd out in the
bright sunshine and shown off before
an admring multitude: | will be trot-
ted out when it's raining cats and dogs
and soaked to my innrrmoSt Innings
with shrink producing liquids. You will
he hung up carefully with all sorts of
newfnnglrd arrangements to support
you; | will lie hung up ut my uncle's
if my owner thinks he can get enough
on me to make the trip worth while.
You will be carefully groomrd and
brushed every day; | will he thrown
down behind II trunk and left there to
fret my life away, until some day
tramp will come along and | will 90 to
join the army of the unwashcd. Oh. its
the old. old story of the survival of the
fittest. You are new and elegant,
therefore the tittest. Twiggy vous?
The New Suit-Thrn there are many
happy days in store for me, you think!
The Old Suit-Oh. yes; lots of them.
Pretty soon you will be taken out to
see all the lovely girls our owner
knows, and probably you will be per
mitted to put your arm around some
,.r
alone here in the darkness. with moth
ing to remind me of the good old days
except an unpaid florists bill in my in
side pocket.
The New Suit-I'm jolly we'll sorry
for you. old chap. am
The Old Suit-Don't mention it. Your
day of sorrow will come soon enough.
Your trousers will probably he the first
to get the turndown-mine We're. BY
the way. are you American or Eng
lish?
The New Suit-English. old chap.
The Old Suit thought your tone
was a tritle resonant. And then those
checks are formidable and foreign in
appearance. We Americans run more
to stripes. IIow's the prince?
The New Suit-Very well. | fancy.
shall keep my trousers turned up, for
doncherknow, he'll be reigning in Lon
don one of these days-ha. ha. Deuced
ly clever, isn't it. old chap? | saw it
in Punch. and Punch says some beast
ly clever things. | remember another
The Old Suit-Pardon me. | don't
wish to be rude. but what did you
cost?
The New Suit believe our owner
promised to pay 80 lis. for me, and
blow me if I'm not worth it. eh?
The Old Suit (aside)-Yes, you're like
sinScd cat-you're uglier than you
look. (\louD Well, he promised to
pay SIG for mc-$6 down and the rest
when convenient. My tailor got the &c.
but it hasn't been convenient yet. |
hope your tailor has better luck. OF
course. though, the copyright laws will
protect him. Sh-s-S-s-S-h, here comes
our owner. 1t is Easter morning and
he is going to take you out on the
highways. Good luck to you, my boy.
Put on bold front. and don't scare
the cable cars.
The New Suit-GOOdby. old chap.
Very glad to have met you. I'll see you
later.
The Old Suit-About daylight proba-
bly,. | know him better than you do
Look out for the hobbies, and don't
get pinched.-New York Herald.