The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1900-08-22
STORIES OF THE STREET.

This ts the season when the ingenious
statisuctans get their pencils out and in
dastriously figure out the exact influence
OF the heated term upon the tables of
infantile mortality. An instance OBJ
served yesterday in the immediate vicin-
1ty Of one Of st. Paul's biscuit factories
may serve to furnish these arithmeticians
with additional data and at the same
time convince them that the long suffer
Ing sun is not directly to blame for
everything that goes wrong in the in
ternal mechanism of the rising genera
ton. Three young shavers Of boys were
playing outside the factory in question,
and 1t did not escape their keen eyes
that a rapidly revolving belt close to a
window had deposited upon the sill a
thick layer of what appeared to be -four,
but which might have been anything In
the world that is white Without delay
the most agile OF the three climbed to
the Sill, and hastily sampling the stuff
evidently found 1t good, for he commence
ed partaking of 1t with great relish
An impatient howl from below restored
him to sense of his duty and, gather
Ing double handful, he scrambled down
to his companions, who stood expectant
below. The repast over, the boys re-
sumed their play and in all probability
their vigorous young stomachs stood for
the feast. Had the mixture been dele
ferrous and had their 'tums tums'' reg
tstered vigorous kicks, speedy visits to
the parental homes would have followed
and the pet family recipe for all infan-
tile complaints would have been re-
Questioned and fond mothers would have
spoken of their little ones being over
come by the lawful heat"
The many supposed peculiarities of the
Chinese-English pidgin dialect have af-
forded unlimited scope for imaginative
writer's Of comic operas and for general
purveyors of jokes and anecdotes. But
1t remains fact that no one ever heard
any but a stage Chinaman talk in the
weird jargon attributed to Celest1als in
this country. A customer on entering
laundry is expected to begin by shout
Ing out: Hello, John, how are your"
The Celestial is supposed to reply: ''VeI-
ly well; me feelie alice sannee Mclean
man." Then the customer gets down
to business and inquiries: where's my
washee, washce, john To which John
replies, or should reply: me no savy
your washee, washee; where your
check2' and so on until the conversation
closes. A visit to any Chinese laundry
In st. Paul will convince any inquisitive
or curious person that the intelligent
Orientals speak in monosyllabic snatches,
or else air their newly acquired Sunday
way. Any unwary smart aleck who may
chance upon one Of the so called Chris
tan" Chinee will probably in answer to
his dialect query receive a stab In the
shape Of a memorized sentence. The Chi
nese eyes will squint horribly, but his
tongle VIII articulate distinctly the
words: Excuse me sir, but do 1 under
stand you to be referring to your laun-
dry The smart young man then feels
somewhat smaller than 20 cents and
realizes the truth Of Bret Harte's dictum
that the heather Chlnee is peculiar
In a large plano warehouse and show
rooms yesterday afternoon a brilliant
performer was playing Mendelssohn's
"Consola ton" AS the tender strains
OF this masterpiece hoated out into the
street two very young boys, one of them
barefooted, were to be seen dwelling on
every note with rapt attention. Music
of classic stamp seldom appeals to the
very young, but in this instance the
requisite sensibilities were present, and
alone Of the passing throng the boys
waited and listened Presently the
player struck up one of those Villainously
syncopated melodies, which have been so
feltcitously chriStened "ragtime." The
boys moved on, apparently "jarred" at
the sudden transition, but small crowd
of older folk was not long in gathering
And all stayed until the impromptu re-
cital ceased. It seems a singular thing
that at the present time rag time has
such a hold on the popular taste that
only children with unbIunted and IN
blasted musical instinct will pause to lis
ten to one Of the grandest airs ever com
posed, while crowds of delighted listeners
find time to enjoy a species of music
which happily no white man was the first
to originate.