The St. Johns herald., 1900-07-21

I Ou WHICH AS AdO CAOSAcO
 across the angle of the bridge. Under
 heath was the river, raging among the
 big powders, all ice and spray, but | mind? He didn't mind. He was hang 1 ing on in midair by the skin of his
 teeth. peddling cigars across the hand rail.
 Have a smoker" says he. and pre-
 sented me with cigar. then struck a
 match on his brooches and gave me a
 light. Pay for it? Not much! Why.
 the Britisher thought he was under an
 obligation to me. He met his obliga-
 tions. Once 1 saw a man pay him a
 silver dollar that was in dispute, and l the Britisher flung it at his face. Next time I passed the man on the bridge
 had two dry goods boxes for a coun-
 ter. a, trading license stuck up. a lot
 of apples. two kinds of cigars and
 some trinkets which didn't catch on.
 Tn three days he was full of grub. color
 in his face coat on his back and doing
 a roaring business.
 After week or so he began to build.
 and the beaver wasn't in it for cunning
 On three bits of scantling across the
 angle he put a floor. walls. roof. then a glass front along the hand-rail with
 sliding sashes. He had a dog kennel
 door under the hand-rail 10 crawl in
 by. box stove to keep him warm and
 cook his meals on. and enough floor
 space to roll out his blankets al night.
 Tn six weeks the man on the bridge was
 worth a hundred and fifty dollars. do-
 ing a business at hundred per cent. profit of eight dollars day. Then he began 10 advertise all over town with
 pictures he made himself of cats smok-
 ing. babies crying for 'em. and a whole
 menagerie of men and animals enjoy ing of 'em. Here's from one of his poem advertisements:
 'FIe saw that the prospect was fair
 If he only could find him a lair,
 But no place could be found
 On the dry solid ground.
 So he built up his house in the air.
 With cigars he's seen desperate times
 As he roped In the nickeIS and dimes
 When men died of his smoke
 With gulp and a choke
 He was sent to this town for his crimes"
 Idon't know whether it was the poem or the cold or the Barring crash which busted all the banks and reduced our population to half, but anyway the crazy man on the bridge began to have a bad time. His trade went down to nothing, and instead of three square meals a day he began to i'll up va cancies by eating his own stock, five cents worth of candy for breakfast and a smoke for dinner. Besides that, Long Shorty, one of our special brand of toughs, thought that the man on the bridge was haIing more than his share of prosperity. One Jmorning late in December Long Shorty put two heavy timbers across the river behind the man on the bridge and began to build house on them beams. He planked over his floor. set up his frame of scantling and began to fill in the walls, then went to the city council and told them that he intended, at his own | expense. to lay down an extra side 1 walk to cover the space over the river ! between the bridge and his new sa- loon.
 Of course that meant sweeping away | the man on the bridge, shanty and all, | by permission of the city authorities, l so I sent one of my deputy marshals to see how the Britisher felt.
 "Oh. that's all right" says the man | on the bridge. Long Shorty rests one ! end of his bridge timbers on railroad | land and the other end on private house property. If get his timbers sawn off at both ends, the gentleman will have to swing his saloon with ropes"
 What from?"
 ''Ihe clouds" says the Britisher, and gave my deputy a cigar.
 Now, if that youngster had kicked up a fuss and gone after Long Shorty with 8 gun, I'd have let them worry it out between themselves; but the man on the bridge, although only an alien and 8 tenderfoot with nothing to live on but his native grit. was the only law abiding inhabitant in my district. So I went to Dan McPhail, and says |: "Dan. I guess I'm going to have my spring cleaning"
 Good business" says Dan, so we set to work making out 8 list of the pro- posed exiles, gamblers, buns, crooks, etc, etc, who would never be missed from Amber, to the number of g. We called a session of the vigilance com mittee, posted a guard around my lit- He calaboose and ran in the gentlemen one by one until we had a full house. Then we started the whole bunch-25 1ead-and herded them with stock whips and chunks of ice through the streets to the municipal boundary, where we turned them loose with the that the world was all before them where to choose" One or two who objected we chucked into the river to cool off. but for the most part they went like lambs. including Long Shorty. who understood that I'd plug lim full or holes if he ever showed ais ugly mug in Amber Gulch.
 Going back into town interviewed he man on the bridge who had stuck ID crazy poster suggesting a necktie social or lynching bee. which was off, ,ious of him, and might lead to harm.
 'Take that down." says I. wondering f he'd thank me for running his enemy put of the country-but not bit of it.
 "All right" says the man on the his cheek! ''I see that he people has risen in its might for the evil-doers-whered did 'ou hide?"-London Black and White.
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