The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1900-05-02
CHATS AND SKETCH Els
About Town and Elsewhere.

The good old practice of lecturing
criminals and witnesses in court has
relspsed into 'fnnocuous desuetude."
A Florida justice was trying TO impress
upon prisoner, who was to testify in
bis own case, the solemn nature OF an
oath. "Prisouer at the bari In taking
this solemn oath to tell the truth, the
whole truth and nothing but the truth,
take care that you do not allow your
self to be tempted to commit wllful
perjury. Remember that the eyes of
an all-seeing Providence and of the
town constable are upon you"
-.
Another Judge was commenting up
on the heinous crime of horse stealing.
"For century after century that dread
command, Thou shalt not steal, has
rolled along the ages. 1t is, moreover,
standing rule of this court, and will
soon, doubt not, be a bylaw of our
progressive and soon .to-be incorporated
cityW
We have always wondered why the
clerks of our Vermont courts omit one
clause of the oath: "the truth; the
whole truth; and nothing but the
truth" And also, why, instead OF the
venerable Norman-French, "Oyez, Oyez,
Oyezl" the sheriff should say, "Hear
vel Hear vel Hear yep The "Oytz'
has been used in England since the
Norman conquest, when Norman
French became the language of Par
lament and of the courts. The Queen
still writes, "La Rene uult" or "La
RENE non vult' when she approves or
vetoes bill of Parliament.
An ambitious Deputy Sheriff pre-
vailed upon the High Sheriff to allow
him to open the court, and this is the
way he did it,
80 Yes o Yesl o Yesl Th Hon
orable Superior Court now stands wide
openl"
Printers mistakes, or typographical
errors are unaccountable sometimes.
A rising poet began poetical effusion
with this beautiful line:
III kissed her under the silent stars"
But alasl this was the way the COM
position set it,
81 kicked her under the cellar starsl"
~.
In printing prayer book, one of
the questions in the marriage service
came out thus: "Wilt thou have this
woman to be thy welded wife, n
and forsaking all others, keep thee only
unto her, so long as ye both shall hke?"
(Which is the way many husbands and
wives keep the solemn vowD
Advertisements read strangely some
times. "Wanted a porter who can
carry two hundred weight with the fear
Of God before his eyes," "Wanted
young man who fears the Lord behind
counter" "Two widows want wash
ing" "For sale: A full line of black
ladies gloves"
A Boston chemist is the author of
the following: "The gentleman who
left his stomach for analysis is request
ed to call for it and the result as soon
as possible.
A western paper says: "It is only
twenty-oue years since the first house
was erected in Burlington, aud now it
contains 20,120 Inhabitants.
Another paper, speaking of a self.
made man, said, me arrived In Gall
ifornia twenty years ago with only one
shirt to his back; and since then he has
accumulated over ten million"
Among curiosities of composition we
may cite the following note which was
prefxed to some verses printed in a
country paper: "These lines were
written nearly fifty years ago by one
who has for several years lain IN the
grave for his own amusement"
-.
Describing the funeral obsequies of
William Poole in the New York Times
in 1855, the reporter wrote: "The pro-
cession was very fine and nearly two
miles in length, as was also the sermon
of the minister.
-"
Reporters sometimes get things mix
ed. A presentation of purse and a
dog episode were written up in hurry