The Irish standard., 1900-12-01

than the valley of the Ganges or the
Delta of the Nile | love TO call it
"the Mesopotaman country of the
western world.''
Missourians not only in my district
but outside of it, fight for the prizes of
politics With as much courage and as
much ferocity us Sullivan. FitZSim-
mons, Corbett and .Iciirics battle for
the heavy weight championship of the
world in the squared crclc--with this
difference however, the physical bruis-
crs fight under fixed rules, formulated
by the Marquis of Quecnsbury and
other fiStic artists. while the Missouri
political gladiators fight without rules,
and use every instrument of warfare
ever invented by the ingenuity of man,
including the tomahawk and scalping
knife
In Missouri political life is per-
pctual battle royal. Men fight for
paltry Offices as though the crown OF
the Bourbons were at stake. Every
morning when the Missouri politician
arises from his virtuouS couch he care
fully feels of his top knot to see if it.
like the flag of his country, is still
there. He goes forth in the morning
With his political life in his hands AMI
he is lucky if he returns home at
night with it still in his possession. In
this imperial commonwealth eternal
vigilance is the price of political life.
In the beginning. offices worth hav-
ing-those whose rewards were fame
rather than money-werc few-"I.ikc
angels visits, few and far between"
Consequently it was survival Of the
tittcst-survival political, survival
physical.
One of my predecessors in congress,
Colonel George w. Anderson, n man
of splendid genius and rare oratorical
gifts, who has always reminded ME of
tCharles James Fox, was stumping for
Greeley and Brown down in southwest
Missouri. One night in the midst of
jhis speech an old fellow arose in the
back of the house and said:
Colonel Anderson, is it true that
Governor Brown was so drunk at that
Yale alumni dinner that he buttered
his waterme)on?"
Colonel Anderson reared back on his
pastern joints, Strengthened himself to
his six feet two, and with lions roar
answered.:
Eyes, it is true that Governor Brown
bltterel his watermelon at the Yale
alumni dinner, and l am happy to in
form you that this is the only way In
which watermelons are eaten in polite
society"
Anderson's happy retort was greet
ed with a shout of laughter and a rDa1
of applause by his auditors. His inter
rogator sat down discomfited, and thai
was the last ever heard of the story
which goes to demonstrate the value
of the buttered watermelon-all ol
Dantons famous motto: ''L'audace
L'audacc! Tonjours ,raudace!'
Colonel Anderson was wonderful
stumper. He was most emphaticall.
a rough diamond. In the rough-an'l
tumble, catch-as- -catch-can style of de
batting he never had a superior in Mis-
souri,. which is saying Il great deal
He was an adept in the use of ever.
species of oratorical weapon.
Charles ID. Drake was one of th'
most forccful characters that ever fig
urcd in Missouri politics. He was tin
father Of the constitution of 1865, Pre-
scribing the celebrated test oath
which came to be known as the Ora
conlnn codc'-and which Il Republican
supreme court of the United State
declared void as being contrary to th
federal constitution ana violativc o
the genius of our institutions.
He became Il senator of the Unite.
States and died chief justice of TIN
Anderson ana Drake locked horn
ut Palmyra. Drake spoke first. An
d"rSon began his rcpiy-famOus in TIL
annals of Missouri oratory-by roll
ing up his sleeves and roaring: "Now
fellow-citiZens, Il am going to pick
drake, and. by the great flying mar1i
crel, watch the feathers fly" And fl,
they did until Drake was indeed wha
Diogcnes defined man to bc-a feather
less bipcu.
AliSSourians no longer invite cacl
other to ''coiIce and pistols for two
about political differences. That pei
formancc is obsolete. We have mos
stringent statutes against it: but til
Old hrllicosc spirit is not dead, and
makes itself manifest in mental pug,
liSticS.
Indeed. the redoubtablc and trucu
; lent Benton himself loved to witncs
the passing of the bloody system; fol
though he began his career in Missouri
by killing his man in n duel, he cnde'
by being sued for slanucr
The heroic epoch of Benton's life be
gan as his senatorial career closed
and produced bitterness which thi
D., generation cannot comprehend. |
came about in this wise: The Mis-