The Savannah morning news., 1900-10-18


From the New York Sun.
New Workers md much amusement lust
now in the music halls and vaudeville
shows about town. While they often come
face TO face with the stage Jokes OF their
boyhood, the stereotyped conundrum from
the patent medicine mans almanac or
the stories they heard IN tho corner
grocery days. they md much that is ncw
and really witty. Most OF the funny say.
irgs look nat la print. but the ridiculous
manner in which they are uttered ana
the horseplay which accompanies most
OF them serve to carry them OF with more
or less success. The following is so pop
uiar Just now that It IS being told in half
dozen New York theatres nightly and
has been IN use for six months.
First Comedian--My sister has great
luck. She was down 20 Asbury Park this
summer and got $40 pearl out OF an
oyster
Second Comedian-Thars nothing. NJ
sister got diamond necklace this sum
mer out Of lobster al Narragansett Pier
Mason and Francis. a sketch team who
played at PrOctors Twenty-third Street
Theatre. opened the programme with a
sketch In which the stage setting showed
he exterior OF a country inn. The man
OF the team appears as "A farmer The
woman appears a. the waitress After
a little by play the farmer announces that
he would like some dinner Many OF the
dishes he orders are not on the bin Of fare.
Finally he saws ne would Ike to have
some hard boiled potatoes.
we haven't any" replies the girl we
didn't expect YOU"
We'll. then" says he. give me a couple
Of loose eggs"
Haven't any" il again the answer
I'VE didn't expect YOU"
We'll" asked the farmer, didn't the
hens expect me either7" and she answers
No. II they had. they would have been
laying Tor YOU"
You're wonder"
You ought to see my sister"
Where Is she?"
Doing a skirt dance in Aladdin
You ought 20 see ms sister. She's DO
ing shirt dance In a laundry"
Walter Terry and Nellie Elmer a song
and dance team. who appear later on.
discuss matrimouy The girl finally says.
wv hat kind Of a husband do YOU advise
me TO get?" lie replies:
Get a single man, and let husbands
alone"
Two men. billed as ~smlth and Cambeu
talking comedians" amuse the audience
with this sort OF patter:
I'm going 10 buy my Uncle Tom a can
dy horse"
"why2 lie might not like it,
well. II he don't like it he can lick It,"
Don't spring anything Ike that on me
Did you hear about my friend7"
No"
Hes a corker"
"Is that SOP
yes. he's got a job Ina bottiing works
do YOU know your coat don't ~ your
ITS good nj"
GO on. iCs almost a CONFUSION"
Il met your wife yesterday
did YOU notice her teeth2''
NO she didn't open her mouth"
That couldn't have been my Wife
Il understand you beat hor ike carpet"
That's the only way I get the dust out
OF her"
Say. do you know ! started in life as
a bare-footed hoy2''
We'll I'll tell YOU right here I wasn't
born with shoes on"
well I'm well fixed now. got Job
helping my father. He's the superin
tendent Of factory and has thousand
men under him
That's nothing; my father had 5000 men
under him"
rs that so7''
YES. when he went up in the balloon
in Chicago"
wei. my father was a soldier He was
tho first man 90 enlist in the i2ist Ipswich
Regiment"
There's no such regiment Don't tell
that TO any one that knows anything
n never do
Al Miners Bowery Theatre a team an.
nounced as Campbell and Csuiaeld Kings
Of Irish Comedy" joke about the mother
in-law. the father-in-law ana other mem
bers OF the family. They even go hack %
their grandparents. Here r. n sample
Camphell-My grandfather was 50 smart
he knew he was going 20 die ten days be-
fore he died.
Caulaeld-who told. him. the sherin7
Campbcll-And when my grandmother
died She had $50 worth % gid 81 her
teeth.
caulnold-Thars an awful lot OF money
going TO the devil.
Camhell-Wen. We won't talk abou; our
dead relatives: but did you hear about
mo the other night? I met a Dutchman
who offered 90 make bet with me that
he couh sing longer than ! could. took
an the bet and sang Annie Laurie" for
two hours and a half
Cnulfed-Did YOU VIM
Camphell-No. he Gang The Stars and
stripes Forever"
Later on IN the show Coulter and Starr.
negro comedians. get into an argument
ara Coulter says;
II saw a deaf and dumb man run Owe
this morning. and he was knocked speech
less"
starr-.Ah. 90 on How could that be?
Coulter-fts q fact: one q his hands
was cut on.
starr-Wen its strange how people viii
r., in tho way Of cable cars and be killei
| 80 young Ny father lived 20 be on old
man. RE died al the age of Is.
| Couiter-Aiine died az 10.
| starr--Go on.
| coulter-Yes. iss Eight avenue
Al the Broadway Music Han De Wolf
uesp4r and Lillian Russell chan each
other Tor the amusement of the audience.
FOR Instance;
Ropper-say. Lillian. Just think OF us
| down here az Weber & Ficld's Why ala
| Won leave comic opera
! Miss Russeii-Ill tell you some day
some rainy day.. 5