The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1900-07-27
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"e"etl-Just the same; / married sis
ters-same mother-in-law.-Town Top
les.
DO you ever pay any attention to
the weather mans predictionsY' "Yes.
BY reading what he predicts can
nearly always tell what it isn't going
to do"
Mrs. Gadd-You do not show your
age at all. Mrs. Gabb Cdelighted)-
Don't 1! Mrs. Gadd-No; l see you've
scratched It out of your family Bible
New York Weekly.
A Capltalist.-"Do you see that dogY'
Eyes; but what Is there so wonderful
about himT Hes worth fifty thou
sand dollars" Good gracious! How
did he save the moneyT-Life.
Mrs Thinkhard-Of late years the
spread Of intelligence among all classes
has been simply wonderful, Old bach
elor-Yes. l notice there has been a
great falling off in the number Of mar
riages.
At Rehearsal.-Stage Manager
What! You laugh while you're sup
posed to be dying? Actor-Certainly
At the wages you pay, why shouldn't
death be greeted with joy?-Fliegende
Blaetter.
what is an exit, papa?' Exit.
Freddy? Well, It is Latin placard
hung around on the walls in theaters
and opera houses to keep people from
thinking they smell fire" -lndianapO-
lis Journal.
She-They've got new girl at Hi
rams. He-Is that so? Can she cook
any better than the last one they had?
She-Well, hardly; this one is only
about twenty-four hours old.-Philadel-
phia Record.
Would Affect His Trade.-Mack
O'Rdl-Yes, he is always afraid the
sun may suddenly drop from its posi-
ton. Luke Warme-Is he a scientistT
Mack O'Rell-No; a parasol manufac-
turer.-Chlcago News.
Burly Tramp-Wots tn good Of a lit
tie dog like that? Mrs. Rural-To keep
off tramps. He! he. Wot kin that
little critter do?" HE can bark; that
will wake up the big dogs under the
porch" Eyes, mum. Good day,
mum. New York Weekly.
Papa" said Benny Bloobumper. Il
saw two bad boys Tipping cents. and
after a while they went away and
when they had gone found penny"
Did you play yourself Benny asked
Mr.. Bloobumper mo papa Then
YOU were an in-a-cent by-stander."-
Bazaar.
.Pat. thought hired you to carry
bricks up that ladder by the day.
.Ye did. sor." We'll. I've been watch
ing you. and you've only done it half Il
1ay to-day. The other half you spent
coming down the ladder" "Oi'll thry
to be doin betther to-morry. sor. -
Harlem Life.
81 hope my explanation is satisfac'
tory" said Mr.. YOunghusband, as lie
concluded a long narrative as to why
10 had been detained down town until
a m We'll" yawned Mrs. Young
husband. your excuse is fairly good
,ut it's not as good as father used IL
make."-Chicago News.
Henry" said she. disconsolate'y
t "you didn't give me birthday GIT
nv love. that's So" said Henry. "ba
con see. YOU always look so young thu
. can't realize you ever had birth 'ays.
: Then she was happy, and he smiled the
/ moan. subtle smile Of a man who hA'
. saved money.-Boston Traveller.
' .Alrernon is very interesting" salt
tha Stockholders daughter. VIVA
= docs he talk about?" inquired he
: father "Why. he's ever so well 20
Cd in Shakspearean quo'at oAs
!, young woman" said tie fnanc.e'
sternlv don't you let him deceive you
there amt no such stock on the n'ai
t ket."-Tit-Bits
At a country fcte a conlu err wa
: performing the old trick of produfin
COOS from hat. when he remarked {
LITTLE boy: Your mother cant Z
ogcs without hens, can She 49,
curse she cam rep led the IA
why. how is that? asked the cor
!. ,rrer "she keeps ducks" replied th
d bow. amid roars of laughter.-rit-b. T.
d look here" said Mr.. DobbS to I'd
house agent, my wife will be calm
to.doy. and want you to tell her tina
tTat house we have been looking at
. ok But, my good sir" proteS'ee
, the agent, at isn't taken 1T Will
J .ben" answered Mr.. Dobbs 81 al
: ,aZing It now. Mrs. Dobbs cant MAX
z 80 ber mind. but she'll want it directl
she thinks she cant get it
The volunteer in the Philippine
% wrote home to the old man as follow
c "Fstber. l need $50 Immediately. Lo
, another leg in battle yesterday. An