The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-07
FUN IN CURRENCY DEBATE.
HUMoR AND POETRY CALLED TO
THE AID OF MANY SPEAKERS.


ing to BE Serious Proves to BE IA
Wit-Has a Joke at Mr.. Bryan's Tx
peRse.
Washington Letter in New York Times
There was plenty Of wit and humor in
the debate on the currency bill.
ore of the first outbreaks Of this nature
was made by Mr.. Cox of Tennessee. Mr.
Linney Of North Carolina had the floor
and was ridcuing the claim of the Demo-
Gratis that the bill was being damned
through. He said the question had been
fully discussed for twenty years.
IT is said" exclaimed Mr. Linney, that
man changes his entire being every seven
years-the nails, and every particle. every
tooth in him, and every hair upon his
head is turned to something else. Seven
into twenty-six goes three and nearly four
times Over three generations, taking the
measure of that length of time, have been
spending their energies and the best part
of their life in discussing this great ques-
ton"
Mr.. Cox broke in on Linney's speech
and read an extract from a speech made
by the latter in the Fifty-hfth Congress.
in which Linney argued that bonds might
be legally and morally paid in silver.
"Has the gentleman shed his toenails
since he made that speech?' asked MI
Cox amid great laughter.
Cushman of Washington, in his maiden
speech, established a reputation as hu-
morist, much TO his subsequent regret. lie
has a reputation as . humorous stump
speaker, but he intended to be serious in
his first speech In the House. He was
replying 10 De Almond, and was soon mr.
ing epigrams like this at the Democrats:
I'm 1892 the American people were so
busy making money that they did not
have time to think. They voted Demo-
cratic administration into power, and then
they had plenty of time to think"
He succeeded in Irritating the Democrats
beyond measure by this reference TO MI
Bryan:
wears ago. and I know him. Yes, Mr..
Chairman, I know him os well as If l had
been through him with a lantern.
Several Democrats attempted to reply
to this sarcasm but the only one who
succeeded in arousing a laugh was Rob
inson of Nebraska, who said: why, the
gentleman from Washington Is so small
compared with the man he assals that his
going through Mr.. Bryan with Ian
term could be likened only to a light
ming bug wandering through the vast re-
cesses of the mighty Mammoth cave of
Kentucky"
Cushman closed his speech not with an
eloquent pereration as he had intended,
but with tfe following impressive apos-
trophe to the Democrats: THE trouble
with the immortal William Jennings Bry-
an and with most of you gentlemen on
the other side is that in your arguments
you are so crooked you cannot walk
around the block without meeting your
selves on the other side
While John f. Lacey of Iowa was speak
ing he got into a eolloquy with John Wes-
ley Gaines on the subject of prosperity.
He finally got Gaines to admit that the
latter's section of the country was fairly
prosperous, and commented on the con-
fession thus:
my friend thinks that his part of the
country is doing well, but wants to do bet
ter Let me recell the epitaph on the tomb
stone of one who tried experiments IN
life. It read: I was well. but wanted
to be better. 1 took physic; now 1 am
here"
Bryan's Twins in Verse.
Mr. Gibson of Tennessee recalled Bry-
ans twins, silver and wheat, and said:
But 10! since Bryans defeat wheat and
silver have had a fearful quarrel and
wheat has taken one end of the road,
while silver has taken the other. and now
they are far apart and divorced from bed
and board, if not absolutely. They seem
to have turned their backs upon each
other forever. How sod! Wheat seems
to have said to silver:
Go false one go: I'd rather make
NV bower upon some Icy lake
Where thawing suns begin 20 shine,
Than trust to love so false as thine
And silver seems to have said to
wheat:
Had we never loved 50 blindly.
Had we never loved so blindly-
Never met or never parted.
We had ne'er been broken hearted"
we fearful saints, fresh courage take:
The clouds We so much dread
Are big with mercy, and will break
With blessings on your head"
Champ Clark began his speech by saving
that the Republican jubilation over the
recent election was lone OF the most amaz-
ing phoncnena that I have observed In
forty-nine years of tabernacling in the
flesh" and fortified the statement with The
following story:
"A young physician was called in case
of great delioacy. When he returned to the
he got along.
First rate replied the youthful dis
ciple of Aesculapius. The mother ana
baby are both dead but I saved the old
man."
Defends the Wilson Bill.
Clark declared that he was astounded at
Gen. Grosvenor's statement that the VIII
son bill was free trade measure, and said
it reminded him of a remark made by Col.
George W. Anderson, a lawyer in his
county.
''He was a brilliant orator." said Mr..
Clark. but in his younger days was not
web up in the technicaltes Of his profess
sion. on one occasion he was about 10
be knocked out Of court when Judge Por-
ter, who was presiding-a very kind-heart-
ed man-undertook 10 help m by saying:
Col. Anderson. are you taken by sur
prise? Whereupon Anderson electrified
bench and bar by replying, Good God.
your honor! ! am not only surprised. but
utterly astounded
He scored Gen. Grosvenor for making
such a statement, and added: "He GER
iainly cannot be excused on the grounds
Of ignorance, for one Of his fob es is ON
niscience.'
Clark's poetry was copius. but mostly
of the Familiar OuafaffOpe 50 order