davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
DIPLOMATIC.

II am sorry you asked me for that
small loan just now" exclaimed the
friend. ''It is a coincidence that has
developed annoying frequence."
I'm sorry if 1 have troubled you"
said Mr.. FucaSh.
pOintment. You see, my uncle is al
ways writing me letters Of advice. He
is continually telling me to learn to
say no. and your little requests al
ways seem to come just when l am
practicing. "-Washington Star.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
WHEN HE WANTED TO GO.
Young Man Merely Mentioned His
Wish at an Oppcrtune Time.

Young Man Merely Mentioned His
Wish at an Opportune Time.
"You will doubtless remember the
famous 'rustlers' fight" said II. X
Jenkins of Cheyenne to a reporter.
1.-The prominence of the men involved
caused it at the time to create a SEN
sation. The 'rustlers,' as they were
called, were a band of cattle thieves
who made their headquarters at Jack
sons Hole. Some ranchers who had
suffered at their hands determined if
possible to recapture their stolen cat
tie, and to this end they organized an
expedition.
1.-THE story of how the 'rustlers' coop
ed them up and how the latter were
finally arrested, after a fight of several
days, and spent some months in jail
at Cheyenne is all ancient and oft told
history now, but L heard a story in
connection with the fight the other day
that struck me as rather amusing. 1t
seems that q young Englishman was
visiting one of the ranches, but he had
declined to take part in the expedition
on the ground that he had no stake in
the game. He was persuaded, how
ever, and finally went along, but with
the distinct understanding that if he
wanted to return home at any time
he was to be allowed to do so. When
the party were driven to take refuge
in the cabin in Jackson's Hole, they
managed to construct an outpost.
which would hold two Of their num-
Der, some yards in front Of the cabin.
after the fight was on the young
Englishman became the life of the par
ty. He had a banjo and was the pos
SCISSOR Of a good tenor voice. When
the matters looked most dubious, he
kept at it with his banjo and his song
until cheerfulness was restored. He
was a good shot and made himself in
valuable in many ways. One day,
however, when he and his friends were
occupying the outpost, he turned to his
companions with, You remember our
agreement and that l was to be allow
ed to return home whenever 1 wanted
tor Yes answered the surprised
friend, of course l do. What Of it%
WELL returned the young Englishman,
with a cheerful grin, as he ducked his
head as a white puff of smoke indi-
Gated that shot was travelling in his
direction, if it's all the same to you
chaps, 1 want to go home now New
York Tribune.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27

No. 41O.-Triangle: 1. Sparrow. 2
Parian. 3. Arian. 4. Rial. 8. Ran. g.
On. z. w.
No. 411.-Animal Puzzle: Toothbill
Ocelot. Uta. Yak. Tatouay.
No. 412.-European Collections: Airs
Star. Cere. Tyre. Vase. Rail. Moon
No. 413.-A Riddle: Stole.
No. 414.-A Diamond: 1. p. 2. Cur
8. Carat. 4. Puritan. 8. Rattan. 6. Tan
z. N.
No. 415.-Double Acrostic: 1. Grace 2
r and L. g. Adage. 4. Young. g.
Summary. Primals and finals-Qray'a
"Elegy."
No. 416.-Gates: I. Irrigate. 2. Inves.
tgate. 8. Surrogate. 4. Fumigate. 8
Aggregate.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
}. 422.-An Old Saying.
No. 423.-Numerfcal Puzzles.

1. Some people use 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-S in
youth, and their manners become very
1913 40 CTS.
2. So 1913 4-5 81 the ship bound for
Manila. My 1-2-3-4-5-6-7 on the boy!
3. Put down your 1928 1876; cannot
see that picture of the Spanish 1-2-3-4-5-6.
4. Please 1-2-3-4-5-6, mamma; the hen
1928 1876 little chicks.
5. My wrath 1-2-34-5-6-7-S-9 when
look at that pretty silk all IL 3-4-5-6-7-
SO.
6. Who is that old 1-2-3-4-5-6? Does
1-2 1856 ale or beer?
z. Pick that 1884; 5-6-7 lessons the
value Of all kinds of 1-2-34-5-6-7.
8. I have lost my 1928; 4-5-6 7-S and
find it; want to dance a Spanish 1873
4-5-6-7-S.
8. When we read King 1924, 5-6-7
1-2-34-5-6-7 all his speeches.
10. discovered 1928 1861 who were
1-2-34-5-6-7 of the big nest.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
CHAPTER III.
Saturday

Dinner hour in the McSwat mansion.
How much did you say this majes-
tic ruin weighed when in the pride of
its full grown beauty, Lobelia?" said
Billiger, making a cash on the left
side of the turkey, hitherto untouched.
and slicing off some of the white meat.
"Twenty-seven pounds and half
81 had forgotten whether it was %
or 81. Did you ever see picture of an
@pyornis, Lobelia?"
mo. What is it?"
at is gigantic bird, of which some
remarkably interesting fossil remains
have been found. Its egg was several
times as large as an ostrich's egg. The
bird itself, L am happy to say, is now
extinct-unless this is an apyornis."
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
CHAPTER ~.

1.-The sermon this morning, Lobelia.'
observed Mr.. McSwat, sitting down ar
the table Sunday afternoon and unfold
ing his napkin. Ibid not strike me rs
being in the preachers happiest vein.
What he said, though, about chara ctei'
being formed largely by the home life.
with it's quiet and refined influences
Oh, great Caesar, Lobelia! Is this that
laundering old turkey again? Are we
never going to have the last of it ?'
"Now, you needn't make a fuss about
that turkey, Billiger. It's nicely
warmed over. and it will be just as
good as ever. There's too much of it
to throw away, and you know it as
well as 1 do
Pardon me for asking the question
again, Lobelia, but how much did you
say it weighed in the raw?"
'Twenty-seven and one-half pounds.
You ought to be able to remember it
by this time"
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
Why the Painter Hurried,

The 1rishman was painting his barn,
and he was hurrying his work with all
his strength and speed, says the Utica
Observer.
What are you in such a hurry for
Murphy?" asked a spectator.
Sure, 1 want to get through before
me paint runs out" was the reply.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
CHAPTER II.

81 didn't order any meat for this
meal, Billiger." said Mrs. McSwat as
they sat down to dinner next day.
''There is plenty Of the turkey left"
"Is this the same fowl we had yes
terday?" asked Mr.. McSwat, surveying
It critically, carving knife and fork in
hand. cit looks larger than it did
then"
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27

Bascom-Do you believe in a college
education?
Bilby-Oh, yes. A college education
is all right, but the same is not always
to be said of the man who fancies he
has one.-Boston Transcript
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
No. 424.-Dehnitions.

1. Naturals. 2. Things possessed by
you and me. 3. Like. 4. A place where
water is usually found. 5. Similar to. 6.
What we like to see If they belong to our
friends. Z. Part of the verb to be. s.
Forever. 9. Part of a drama (phonetic).
10. A proposition. IL. Open for general
USE r. Localities.
The definitions, when correctly guessed
and placed in the order given, form a
well known saying.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
CHAPTER l.

CHAPTER L
"LObelia." asked Mr.. McSwat as he
surveyed the enormous fowl that loom
ed up before him on the huge platter,
chow much did this bird weigh-gross
weight, 1 mean, feathers and alias 1t
came from it's beautiful home in the
country?'
"Twenty-seven and a half pounds, y
replied Mrs. McSwat. "The man said
it was the biggest turkey he had sold
this year"
After a few moments spent in care
full survey of the enemy, for the pur-
pose of deciding the proper strategic
point at which to begin the attack, he
grasped his trusty weapons and sailed
in.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
CHAPTER v.

Early next morning, before anybody
else in the house was stirring, Billiger
McSwat slipped down stairs, took the
remains of that turkey out of the ice
box and weighed them on the scales.
There still remained seven pounds
and half, including the skeleton.
And the drumsticks, large, leathery
and terrible. were yet untouched.
Thereupon BiIliger McSwat, with
hunted look on his face, fed.
He took his dinner down town that
day, and when he did return, at II p,
M, he sneaked up stairs to bed
THE END.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
Her Literary Preten.e.

did you ever read Gray's 'Elegy In
q Country ChurchyardY
The fair young girl looked puzzled,
but only for q moment
Eyes, indeed" she answered. 81 have
read it in country churchyard and
lots Of other places" WASHINGTON
Star.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
Rash Deduction.

Poor thingv' exclaimed one young
woman at the theater. THAT girl is
beautiful, but she is very deaf"
How do you known
"She has sat all through this French
farce without blushing once."-Wash-
ington Star.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
Frequently Done.

Stout-Do you believe it possible to
cook by electricity?
Keldon-After a fashion. 1 offended
. public man in Washington the other
day, and he sent me the worst roast by
telegraph I ever had.-Chicago Trib-
une.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
As He Found 1t.

what do you find to be the principal
expense in running an automobile?"
Paying the installments on it's pur-
chase"-Chicago Tribune.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27

New shoes make old ones last better"
"What do you meanT'
"When you know you have a new pair
in your closet, you feel like wearing the
old ones awhile longer."-Chicago Rec
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
A Relan0G.

"Were you ever treated by q physi-
clan for your nervesY'
Eyes; and 1 had to get some more
medicine when 1 received the bill."-
Philadelphia Bulletin.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
No. 425.-Nuts to Crack.

NO. A1O-N utS 10 OXaCks
1. The nut sometimes needed in school.
2. The nut which is part of a room.
3. The nut which is placed on the ia
BILE.
4. The nut which is a part of the body.
8. The nut which is found in the gar
den.
g. The South American nut
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
Chicago Tribune.

Housewife-Clear out! I won't give
you a thing!
Beggar Gas barrel organ strikes up)
Then, madam, may I beg you for the
honor Of a waltz at least?-Meggen-
dorfers Blatter.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27

"Papa, what is observation-disclosures
Agreeing with headstrong people
when you know they are wrong"-Chi-
cago Times-Herald.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
No. 42O.-Capitals.

NO. 4XO.-CaP1ta1s.
I. Which southern capital towers to a
height?
2. Which contains beautiful tree?
3. Which is four-ninths "a fortified
placer"
4. Which contains ga portable instru-
ment for raising great weights by means
of lever, screw" ETC.?
5. Which western capital contains a
circular ornament of precious material?
6. Which is part of train?
z. Which is three-tenths composed OF
the masculine portion of human beings?
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
No. 42i.-Three Souares,

No. 42i.-Three Squares.
I. A very valua BILE grain.
2. White with age.
3. Very earnest. ardent, impetuous.
4. In ancient times scene of cruelty
an open space.
8. A despotic ruler curtailed.
1. The ecclesiastical head OF q parish;
q substitute.
2. Very angry.
3. A church dignitary.
4. To make amends for q wrong.
5. To restore, to make again.
1. A fragrant tree.
2. To escape from, to avoid.
8. Landmarks Of time; fruit.
4. One skilled in any art or employ
melt.
B. Musical signs.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
MSWAT'S TORTURE.
OR ONE CAN HAVE TOO MUCH OF A
GOOD THING.

The Horrible Story of n Sensitive
Householder who Lived on the Fat
of the Land. hut Could Not Properly
Appreciate His Luck.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
1 t!ttE$R[})jHlEER


No, 417.-Charade.
My FIRST to Laura, peerless maid,
Such witching beauty gave,
That generous Edgar could not choose
But be her willing slave.
He urged his suit, alas, in vain!
Without his host he reckon'd.
She had no heart, or, if she had,
Twas very like my SECOND.
She sought more congenial mate
And found kindred soul,
So to q miser gave her hand,
For Laura was my WHOLE.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
Bliss.

"Say, nobody ever caught a fish here.
There's no good trying it,
"That's just the beauty of it. You
can fish and fish and fish, and you
amt bothered pulling the things OUT
-Fliegende Batter.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27

No. 419.-An Odd Puzzle.
More than reading or writing,
All schoolboys delight in
At least, by their mirth they confess it.
That little word make,
Only one letter take,
And a hundred to one you'll not guess it.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
Simply Killing.

Miss Tiptilt-Yes, dear, we are both
strangely beautiful. but I think you
will admit that mine is of the most
deadly, fatal order!-Ally Sloper.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
No. 41s.-Beheaded Words.

1. am to track; behead me, and I am
O running match; again, and I am a
playing card.
O. am to weave; behead me, and I am
q useful article; again, and am a prepo-
sition.
3. 1 am a mineral; behead me, and l
am sound; again, and am q number.
4. am a verb; behead me, and I am a
skating place; again, and I am a writing
material.
8. aIn thorny bush; behead me, and
I am to wander; again, and am to jog
along.
El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1900-01-27
How Things worl

}. The South American nut.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1900-09-27
Randolph Continued.

Dyer's ice carts will make their last triy
Oct. I'd.
B. d. Chadwick is attending the Brattle,
boro fair.
Mrs. Rufus Hutchinson continues dan.
gerousy low.
Henry Butterfeld of Roxbury is visiting
friends here.
Pay your taxes before Saturday night
and save discount.
Thomas Carr OF West Hartford was in
town over Sunday.
Mrs. w. c. Cushman is spending some
time in Burlington.
s. s. Ballard of Montpelier was in town
Tuesday and Wednesday.
N c. Buck cut his foot with an axe
while cLopping Tuesday.
DR.. j. d. Wheeler of Boston was in
town the first OF the week.
W. r. Davenport is recovering at Lud-
low from hi7 recent illness.
Leon Sault is teaching school in the
Battles district in Braintree.
Mrs. Jennie Swan is spending some
time with friends in Woodstock.
mrs. Kingsbury OF Montpelier is spend
ing several weeks at L. p. Booths.
Mr. and Mrs. W. F. Edison have been
visiting in Lebanon, n. H., this week.
Forest Totmsn has been very i'll this
week but is reported more comforta BILE.
Miss Bessie Lewis, who had spent the
summer in Boston, arrived home Tuesday.
Mrs Evan r Evans arrived home Mon
/ day after two weeks visit in Waterbury
Misses Emma and Alta Bailey visited
in South Royalton from Friday until Tues
day.
The members of the o. E. S. hold a soci.
able this evening in the Masonic ante.
rooms.
Mrs. Chas. Mann OF Underhill came
Tuesday to visit her parents, j. A. Fowler
and wife.
VIM. J. Blodgett arrived from Saratoga
y. T., Friday to spend about two weeks
among friends.
iting Mrs. Ellen Young, returned tC
Barre Monday.
Miss Addie Cathan arrived home Fri.
day after spending several weeks with
friends in Bradford.
Mrs. A. R. CrandaH has returned from
Woodstock where she spent some tim,
with her son, Charles.
Miss Lena Ellison came from Bellows
Falls Saturday to spend a two weeks vaca
tion with her mother.
Mr.. and Mrs. Louis Rsymore and baby
who bad been spending some time here
returned to Bethel Monday.
w. s. 5. Buck, wife and daughter, Doro.
thy, return today from Willismstown
where they have spent several days.
Mrs. B. NJ. Huse went Monday on tn,
/ excursion TO New York and will visit hel
son, Earl, and wife in Newark, N. j.
Mr.. and Mrs. John Gorham OF Fitch
I burg, Mass, who had been guests at II. c
Aliens, went to Mortified Monday.
Mrs. Annie Reynolds, who had been
visiting at the home of her brother in Ia "
/ c. {. Reynolds, returned TO Belmont, Y
[ H., Tuesday.
Ernest Kibbee of the North village, who
attends the High school, had his nose
7 twisted Tuesday in a football scrimmage
on the school grounds. DR.. Rasslow ST.
tends him.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1900-09-27
WANTED. FOR SALE. ETC.

Pigs for sale. tt E. V. STEELE.
See j. E. Jerd's clothing ad. in this issue.
Auction OF household goods in Depot
square next Monday morning.
WANTED:-To hire a man TO drive team.
DIX CAMP, East Randolph.
shall be in Randolph Oct. l, and 8.
DIR. GEO. Ii. SPILLER, Opticisn.
WANTED: Chickens, live or dressed.
F. y. JERD.
A very desirable cottage house to rent.
w. E. LAMsoN.
House on Forest street for sale. Inquire
OF j. p. CLEVELAND. wv
Pigs and few shoats for sale.
II ROBERT Ii. CHAMBERLIN.
Will pay highest market price for hides,
skins and pelts. II +. y. JERD.
WAETED:-A man for the fall and win
ter. 2w A. A. GILMAN, Randolph Ctr.
WANTED:-Girl for general homework.
Enquire OF Mrs. j. ID. Denison, Randolph
avenue.
For sALE:-At my mill in East Bethel,
100 cords of slab in lots OF i've cords or
over for Il per solid cord. 3w JOHN BOOTH.
WANTED: Secondhand furniture, house
hold goods, musical instruments, biey-
Giles, Sewing machines, etc. EXCHANGE.
10000 black berry and Cuthbert red rasp.
berry plants for sale at my farm for fall
planting, s.35 dozen, $40 per hundred.
3w JOHN JEwETT, Barnard.
Very finest laundry work done by
Acme Steam Laundry of White River
Junction. Satisfaction guaranteed.
c. W. HAYWARD, Agt.
will be at the Red Lion Inn each
Saturday from 1890 to 8. All optical de-
fects remedied and ocular headaches
cured. PROF. AVERY, Barre.
will sell my farm of 100 acres in good
state Of cultivation and good buildings, or
exchange for place ia village. 3w
JOHN DIcKERMAN, East Randolph.
WANTED A girl or middle-aged wom-
an for general homework In small family.
Must be capable and well recommended.
Address -. b. s., "A Centre street, Con-
cord, N. H..
/ am prepared to do trucking. Will
move anything from a trunk TO a build
ing. Green and dry wood for sale.
Teams to let. viii do threshing or cut
ensilsge. u {. c. BLoDGErT.
A CARD:-For kindness and sympathy
shown US and assistance and flowers given
at the time OF the death OF our little
daughter, we return heartfelt thanks.
Mr.. AND MRS. c. c. REYNOLDS.
viii buy 1000 bushels OF cider apples on
or before Nov. /, 1900. Must be good
ones; pay two cents extra for varieties
kept separate. Will make cider for a cent
gallon. Nine bushels for barrel, also
have cider to sell. 39 JOHN BOOTH.
A CARD:-We wish to express our graft
tude to all who assisted in any way at the
time of the death OF our mother, Mrs. Tyler,
and to those who contributed floral offer
ings. Mr.. AND Mrs. GEO. WEBSTER,
Mr.. AND MRS. j. L. PRIEST,
Mr.. AND Mrs. He GOODWIN,
Mr.. AND MRS. JOHN SToRRs.
A CARD:-We wish to express our deep
est gratitude to all who in any way helped
in caring for our dear husband and father
in his sickness and assisted after his death,
especially those who so kindly entertained
us in Lincoln and extended to us their
sympathy; also to F. w. Eaton of Roch-
ester for the great service ne did us and
the Post and singers and all who so gen.
erously remembered US with flowers.
MRS. l.. NJ. KENT AND CHILDREN.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1900-09-27
Resolutions of Resnec,

WHEREAs:-The death angel has again
entered our midst and severed another
link IN the fraterual chain that binds us
BY removing our beloved sister, Mrs. a. S.
Drew.
RESOLVED, That in the death of our
dear sister our grange has met with
irreparable loss, she being a mem Der Of
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1900-09-27

Notice to Taxpayers in Braintree.
A discount OF ten per cent on town tax
will not be allowed later than Oct. Goth,
/ shall be at East Braintree Saturday,
Oct. 6, from 10 a. m. till p. M; at Ran
dolph every Monday afternoon to receive
taxes. SELvA n. THAYER, Collector.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1900-09-27
Estray.

Came into my enclosure about three
weeks ago, young, dark colored, horn
less Jersey COW. Owner please claim prop
erty and pay charges. 3w r. F. LADEAU.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1900-09-27

(Other locals on 7th page. }
Catoctin clarion., 1900-11-08
The Land Question.

Land monopoly has been the foundation
of most of the despotisms OF the past, and II
still exerts an influence that is strong for evil
Rhode Island contains 1000 acres, and
100000 people. Suppose one man owned
the whole land area of the state; would he be
dlstingushabe in any essential respect from
one of the landed nobility Of the o.d world?
He would not possess princely title, but he
would possess princely estate. And 1t is
the estate, uot the title, that confers the
power OF control over the lives of others,
which i. the substance of aristocracy. But
you say, why waste time with suppostion?
Wait moment. There are several men IN
the United States, each of whom possesses
more land than the State of Rhode Island
contains, and one of these men owns an area
that would make five states like Rhode Is
land, and still leave 1000 acres to start on
the sixth. Again, the land under one OF the
largo stores in Philadelphia is said to be
worth $l0,0OO,O00. This value has been
created by the growth of the city, and Of the
country; the science and inventions ofa'l the
ages. the railways, telegraphs telephones,
the civilization Of the nineteenth century.
the million people of Philadelphia, and the
seventy five millions in America, have all
had part IN producing the value of that
land yet that value has accrued to the midi
vidusl owners of that bit ofsol.
Theae and many other things about our
lind system call for serious thought. Wheth-
er the single tax be thonght wise, or not;
whether limitation of land ownership and
the breaking up of large estates by the pres
sure of progressive taxation, as in New Tea
land be deemed best or not whatever Ideas
as TO remedies may prevail, it is clear that
the evils of land monopoly demand earnest
consideration on the part of all our citizens.
As an aid in studying this important subject
we know no better book than-"The Land
Quest on from Various Points of View ~
Price paper, csc. Equity Series" No. 2.
1920 Cnestnut.st., Philadelphia.