St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1900-08-04

cent lace you bought yesterday be.
gain counter needed the money. But
never mind about that. Where are we
going to eat? I'm ravenous."
'Oh, any place." said Mrs. Jobson.
"Oh, that's all the interest you have in
the scheme, is it?" said, Mr.. Jobson.
'You don't care whether I'm faint
from hunger or not. do you:" T.
How about the-?" suggested Mrs.
Jobson, naming one Of the hotel resau-
rants.
How about moving the Waldorf-As-
toria down here?" said. Mr.. Jobson.
u hope you haven't become possessed
of the idea, Mrs. Jobson, that I'm going
to pay about Sass day for our din
ners, have you? Because I'm not GO
ing to do any such thing. Come on. !
know where We'll go. Wen go to IS.
They don't put on many lugs down
there, but they give you enough to eat
without assessing you a weeks wages
for it,"
So they went to IS. 1t was very
hot, and by the time they arrived there
they were perspiring and. uncomfort-
able, Mrs. Jobson particularly so in her
new, tight-fitting foulard dress.
1t was just after the departments
had closed, and the restaurant was so
filled that they had difficulty in getting
seats at all, and the places they Gtd
finally secure were about 40 feet out OF
range of the electric fans. Mr.. Jobson
gave vent to numerous ''Huhs!" over
this, but he picked up the regular din-
ner bill of fare and beckoned a waiter.
The waiter looked Mr.. Jobson over
carefully and went on about his busi-
ness. When we passed that way again
a few moments later Mr.. Jobson
snapped his fingers for him again. this
time somewhat savagely. The waiter
approached the table and inclined his
ear.
''Thanks for letting me catch your
eye, after sitting here for four solid
hours" said Mr.. Jobson, sarcastically,
to the waiter. "D'ye think you could
let us have bite to eat, now, if we act
real humble?"
'Yessuh," said the waiter. "Ahll be
back dis-uhway shotely, suh," and then
the waiter went off. After about -
minutes he again got within Mr.. Job.
sons finger-snapping range-Mr. job
son was meantime growing things un-
der his breath that caused the people
at the other tables to look around at
him-and once more the waiter ap.
preached the Jobsons' table.
"Look-a-here," said Mr.. Jobson to
the waiter, "do we get anything to eat
here, or don't we?"
"Yessuh. Ah'se uh-waitin' TO- yo'all's
ohduh. suh," said the waiter.
'Two regular dinners," said Mr.. Job
son.
'De reg'luh dinnuh. suh," said the
waiter. ''is suhved at five o'clock. sub,
an hits on'y uh quahtuh t five now,
sub. Eff yo'all's wants tub wait, sub,
Ah'n TEX yo' ohduh an"
Madam" said Mr.. Jobson to Mrs.
Jobson, rising sternly and taking his
hat, 1--WE shall take our immediate de-
parture from this place" and then he
clomped out, Mrs. Jobson following
him.
"Where are we going now" said Mrs.
Jobson, when they got outside.
"Where are we going, madam" said
Mr.. Jobson. in a tone of suppressed
fury. "Where else are we going but
home? We are going home to get
something to eat, that's where we are
going. Mrs. Jobson. And the next time
you wheedle me into giving my consent
to any such idiotic scheme as this-the
next time you succeed in bamboozling
me into abandoning the comforts of q
home that have slaved and toiled for
years to get together-the next time
you put up job like this on me. for
the sake of getting out of the necessity
of seeing that your husbands dinner is
cooked and served for him under his
own vine and fig tree-there's going to
be a schism and split in the Jobson
family, Mrs. Jobson, and when it's all
over 1 won't be the one wearing the
sackcloth and ashes!"
Then the Jobsons went home and
dined on canned salmon, sardines, Neuf-
chatelc cheese, crackers and dtea.-Wash-
ington Star.