Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1900-02-17
Does the Man Who Hears Complaints
at the Gas Office.
He NEEDS THE PATIENCE OF JOB
People Who Get Mad Over the
Size Of Their Bills.
TAKE 1T OUT ON HIM

the gas office. To be the buffer between a
soulless corporation and a wrathful public
i not exclusively cakes and ale or beer
and skfttIes. Few men, after Watching the
incumbent behind the Complaints desk
Tor an hour or on any day verging to-
ward the final day of grace for paying gas
bills. would undertake TO undermine the
man out of his job. Few men, in truth
could fill that billet. 1t takes man who
has mastered the triple lesson of patience
humility and diplomacy. The man behind
the Complaints" desk at the gas office
must. of verify, be something easy to
get along with at home. One can imagine
him sereneIy reading his Star paper with
three young ones pulling his hair and goug-
Ing his eyes at the same time.
They go at the man behind the Com
plants desk in divers and devious ways.
In the first place, the man who is in a con-
dltlon of SnortinS wrath over gas bill that
looks to him like an outrage upon his rights
Is a man, a citizen and father of a fam
NY invariably opens up first on the gas
ed for him solely for the reception of
moneys. Before the irate man. citizen and
father of family has exuded twelve words
of his torrent the receiving teller breaks
in with:
Complaint desk to the right-an COM
plants heard there.
Adds to His Wrath.
Now. this remark on the part of the re-
ceiving teller is like Inserting an assesaI
into vulnerable part Of the anatomy of
scrappy rhinocerOs. for an angry man who
has his little speech all rehearsed-the gas
bill kickers think it all out on the way
down town on the street car. getting hot
Ter ana hotter with each revolution of the
car WheelS-and who starts in with his out
burst thinking he has nailed the right man
tn listen TO it, is cast into state Of al
most speeches. ferocity when he is calmly
nodded IN the direction of another counter
me preamble to his speech has been
spoiled. and he is put To the necessity of
sIarrlng for another opening. So he
cruncheS up the yellow bill in his hand and
cipmps to the Complains window get
ing redder IN the face at each stride The
result is that when he arrives at the Com
plants desk he feels that he has been
shgttIed back and forth aud fooled with
and then. as they say az the variety shows
II Is up to- the Job-likc man behind the
While they all may be equally wrathfuI
dlHerrnt types of men have different meth
DDS Of opening the action on the listener
to complaints. The average man starts out
something like ehis:
Gets Fair start.
Say. look-a-here. my friend, ! want to
find out what the dickens the meaning is
Of this bill-s7.35. l don't intend to stand
for 1t, that's what l don't, This company
has been sueaking in an extra dollar OF So
on me for the past four months, and this
edge on ne, and can shut of my gas, OF
course. but l m not going To be snuffed out
that way without putting up some kind of
Il roar anyhow! Now. what dye
What was the amount Of your bill last
the desk
on. j forget-seven--en. or something
like that-'bout three times what it ought
I've been
Have you been burning any unusual
amount Of gas this past month";
NJ Il
per cent The bill last month made me so
sore that | concluded I'd just see if l
cnuldHt catch this company in one nefa-
rIous operation. anyhpw-and l haven't
burned enough gas this past month to kill
canary bird if the gas had been permitted
TO escape in a by d room. Now I'll Just
tell You people one thing. and that is
Well send a man up 10 look at your
meter says the man behind the desk in
a gentle. persuasive tone.
on, that's been done before-a million
times l don't intend TO he bamboozled that
way any longer. The CHAP comes I'D to the
house, rings the bell. iinkers with the
meter Tor d minute. says that the meter is
the finest and best-cunlurted he ever saw
and then he comes down here and makes
that report III bet 81 that if one of those
meier examiners were To report that a
meter really was chewing up more gas than
II htd any right to the company nd fire
MIN INTO the street quick that he'd fall
down from vertigo. / don't want any more
than IS coming to ne. but I'm going to
Enter the Gas Stove.
Have You gas stove in your kitchen?'
the man behind the desk gently inquiries.
Yes, but that don't burn any ten billion
feet o gas minute. My wife only uses it
20 get the breakfast az. and
Now long have you had the gas slower"
asks the entertainer of complaints
On, three or four months. but I want
you 10 understand that the gas stove
doesn't cut any figure all. and that
-.i. gas stoves consume a lot of gas,
you Know. sir. says the man behind the
desk. Persuasiyey
oh. know all abou, that dodge. too
That the last Resource Of the gas COM
Iauy when its collar-I-the gas stove
You'd think. To hear yoG people talk that
people who have gas stoves in their kitch-
Ems Keep every burner a-going twenty-five
hours a day-that every man who has a
gdS stove in his kitchen uses il every day
to do the cooking for couple o. regiments
and
On a New Tack.
Well. Id recommend you to lay the mat
ter before the government gas inspector"
advises the man behind the desk. He'll
charge you fee OF 80 cents to examine
your meter. II he Tinds that your meter
really Is out of killer, and registers larger
consumption OF gas than it should. he'll re-
fuud you your fifty cents and appraise the
'Eer-dmount that you've been paying,
which over-amOunt the company II refund
10 you at his appraisal
Now. this suggestion very often hits the
bIustery kicker as Z good scheme-the pros
Pect OF a rebate generally striking him as
worth following up. The truth is that
ap"ut Tour out OF five gas consumers don't
know anything about such an oficiaI as a
government gas inspector. and when these
near about him and his functions they are
generally willing to accept him as arbI-
traitor If. however. the government gas
Inspector decides in favor Of the COMPANY
by reporting that the compIainants meter
Is all right the complainant remains a dead
~ enemy or the government gas inspector
10 the last day OF his life.
The Sarcastic Kicker.
incline your head over here right close
to me, says the sarcastic man to the conn
plant entertainer. while insert into YOU A
Few little facts that'll do you good to know
about Dye remember. last month, when
came down here with justifable howl
over the size of my gas bill. you famed
me by presenting before my vision the
beautiful picture of an ideal government
gas inspector who'd take me In hand. for