Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-01-18
K. p. Banquet.

The banquet OF the Knights OF Py
thias last Thursday to which they in
vited few OF their friends, was
Enthusiastically pleasa ant affair. TIL,
Opera House rooms which has SO many
times been Of use TO the orderon similar
occasions was utilized for the last tirle,
we suppose, the members and their ladies
meet ing there, and then marching into
the lodge room, it having been converted
into banquet hall. The decorations
were tasteful aud pretty ard the supper
was most excellent. The walters chosen
mo silly from X. p families, fitted to and
fro as they sped on their happy errands
This part of the program, the supper,
was much appreciated. Then came the
literary part
Up to the time OF entering the hail
none but the committee knew who the
speakers were to be. On each plate was
found program. DR. Brooks was toast
master. He is most happy and appro-
pirate speaker and sustained his reputa-
ton Thursday night. His Introductory
speech contained good thoughts ele-
gantly expressed The first one to re-
spond to toast was @. A. Marlin who
was to speak on Our foreign posses
sions." DIR. Brooks said it was expected
he would be here until late hour that
evening when Mr.. Marlin had got to
chasing a news item and had got it up
a tree and couldn't leave. He then pr :
ceeded to introduce Fred Blume who
was to respond on sour Spare-rib." The
Doctor said he didn't know what the
subject meant and didn't think Mr..
Blume did, but that would not prevent
lawyer making good speech on the
subject
Mr. Blume handled the strange subject
splenidly, being humorous and enter
tanning He made many happy hits at
the expense OF several members OF the
lodge. After much speculation as to
what his subject did not mean he re-
membered the Bible story and concluded
il releated IN some way to women. At
the close OF Mr.. Bume's speech the
toastmaster said he knew Fred could
speak WELL He said Fred had written
other speeches for this occasion and
proceeded to pull one from his pocket
which he said Fred had dropped and
proceeded to read it. 1t was as follows:
Asnp and down this weary world wander,
OFT DER my lonely state sadly ponder
And wish the Joys connubial that others know
Would come my way and give me half show
You think no other mistress require?
Tho welded to the law, still aspire
To wake In some maids breast loves glorious
thrills
And incidentally to settle all her bills.
The laws all right for getting bread and but
But has no loving heart to softly autter
She gives no vigilance with sweet downcast
Nor yet dyspepsia with her home made pies.
I've paid my court to many winsome Miss,
And "sued" In vain tor only one sweet kiss,
But found alas ere many times I'd seen her
Some other man came In as interyenor."
I've eourted them in English, Dutch and
But all my special pleadngs" proved In vain;
My Irish girl declared "she'd not behave it,
Unless bedad" I'd ''file an affidavit"
Just one alone returned my warm affection
But to my suit her parents filled objection"
tried TO take her from her fathers house
by "habeas corpus" but twas nixcumrous.
But meier will despair, III persevere,
III work my graft full twelve months In the
I'll search the world from Philippine to CarIb'
Until ind my tootsy wootsy spare rib"
The postmaster then introduced Mrs.
Mott who spoke on "When Knighthood
was in Flower" She slightly chaffed
the committee who evidently desired
her to toast the Knights, by throwing
such mantle OF romance around them
selves, while they gave plain subjects to
the other speakers. She said seve raj
other things and We thought we were
going to be able to comply with the re-
qnest OF several Of the Knights who
asked us to publish her speech, but are
prevented by her usual perversity.
Henry Gray's subject was Babies"
He got more out Of the subject than we
thought was in it. His speech was phil
os optical, witty and most excellent He
praised the little kings (and queens)
and toasted them eloquently.
Thus ended most enjoyable occasion.
Dancing followed in the Opera House
for those who desired and social inter-
course for the others. May those happy
occasions of social and intellectual en-
ioyment annually occur with the regular
ity of the coming year.