davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-10-04
a Sermon In 4 Mining CAMP.

Brothers and sisters, l come to say
goodby. l don't believe God loves this
church, because none Of you ever de
don't think you love each other, be-
cause I never marry any OF you. !
don't think you love me, because you
have not paid me my salary. Your
donations are mouldy fruit and worffsy
apples, and by their fruit ye shay
know them Brothers, I am goir ID
a better place I have been called to
be chaplain of the penitentiary. Where
l go ye can not now come. l go to
prepare a place for you, and may the
Lord have mercy on your souls -
From Jim Wardner of WardneF>
Idaho"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-10-04

nered Old cat than any man on the
grounds. And do you know, he took
OF his coat and his collar and his
necktie and rolled up his sleeves and
offered the umpire money to come
where we were, and called it right out
that he could whip the whole park fun
OF wild cats and called the gentleman
names l never heard of and dared him
to take il up. You've heard that
grandpa used to be a lake captain aud
also deacon in the church. Hes
writing to the umpire and the presi-
dent of the league now and he wants
to attend every game and l wouldn't
go for the whole city of Detroit
Detroit Free Press.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-10-04
GRANDPA KNEW THE RULES.
But They Were About Twenty Years
Behind Time.

Grandpa is not so well today" an
swered the lively young lady to the
next-door reighbor who had made
kindly inquiry. wait till run over
l don't want him to hear Us.
"Oh, it was something awful, posi-
lively awful" as she sat down on the
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-10-04
This Year.

The stocky man-Lemme see, yOH
belong to a third party this year, don't
you?
Nope" answered the man with the
wild eye, IT think the number of oar
party is eight. "-Indianapo Press.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-10-04

Jenkin Lloyd Jones of Chicago
wrote to Governor Stone urging him
to assemble the legislature or appeal
to congress to settle the strike.
The Press., 1900-03-29
A Cheerful Liar.

II have followed trout streams ever
since l was a boy" said a Providence
crank, land have tried to solve for
many years the cause of the apparent
decrease in brook trout. Recently
think discovered the cause of the ex-
termination. l was fishing along a
brook near Oakland Beach, r. l., when
1 saw a large snake with half masti-
Gated trout in its mouth. The action
of the snake interested me- and, stand
ing quiet, studied the snake closely.
"On the end of the snakes tail was a
sharp bony growth shaped like a hook
After a few moments my watching
was rewarded by seeing the snake
glide over to some bushes growing
along the bank and catch a grasshop-
per in it's mouth. The snake then
placed the grasshopper carefully on
the hooklike thing on the end of it's
tail.
'By this time my curiosity was thor
oughly aroused" continued the fisher
man. "The snake crawled up on log
that extended from the bank into the
brook and let it's tail hang into the wa
ter. In a moment up came trout
and snapped at the grasshopper. 1t
was short work for the snake to trans
fer the fish from it's tail to it's mouth,
and had solved the problem of the ex-
termination of brook trout" -Cleve-
Plain Dealer.
The Press., 1900-03-29
After q Battle.


In the first aid that is rendered on
the field after a battle nothing is at
tempted beyond the arrest Of hemor-
rhage, the application of temporary
splints for fractures and antiseptic
dressing. There is no washing or ex-
ploration of wounds. The clothes are
merely slit up with scissors, not re-
moved, thus insuring protection to the
patients body and saving unnecessary
disturbances. The sergeant in charge
Of the collection station has field
companion, a water bottle and small
reserve of bandages and first dress
ings in his care to replenish the sur
gical haversacks with which the bear
ers are supplied.
Triangular bandages are chiefly used
on the battlefield, made from SO inch
square of linen or calico, cut diagonal
ly into halves. Almost anything that
comes to hand may be used as impro.
vised splints-sticks, telegraph wire
bark of trees. straw, rifles, bayonets
lances and SO on. The splint, if neces
sary, is padded with straw or leaves
Or grass and is fastened with straps
torn from the soldiers equipment OF
with strips of a shirt, securely bound
with the triangular bandage. Bound
up with the rifle splint, a wounded
man Is made so secure that he car
hardly move q muscle. One leg is
firmly bound to the rifle, and the an
kles are tied together, SO that the in
iured limb is almost as rigid as the
rifle at it's side.-London Standard.
The Press., 1900-03-29
Id by A. G.. Eaton. Druggist.


"a casual observer might suppose
that our business was intensely pro-
saic," said a Poydras street commits
sion merchant, "but such is far from
being the case. All sorts Of queer
things happen in it, not the least Of
which are occasional consignments we
receive from nowhere in particular.
"For instance, back in 1896 or there
about we got load of fine onions one
day by boat. No directions accompa-
MED them, but we took it for granted
they would arrive by mail. When the
expected letter failed to put in an ap-
pearance and we instituted inquiries,
we could get no clew to the identity Of
the shipper, and all we could do was to
sell the lot and deposit the money in
bank, waiting on claimant.
"Fully three years had elapsed when,
to my surprise, another load of the
same kind of onions came to hand, &C
companied by a letter from the sender
saying that he had forwarded similar
consignment at such and such a date
and that his business relations with
the house had been SO satisfactory he
wished to repeat the transaction. We
sent a check for the lump sum, but
what the dickens he meant by his bust
ness relations being satisfactory when
he had had only one deal with us, and
didn't get his money on that, I never
found out. l suppose he just forgot
New Orleans Times-Democrat.
The Press., 1900-03-29
Tempering Copper Not a Lost Art.

4&mpeFAnS copper MOI u AOSt AEIs
The allegation that ancient Egyptians
tempered copper and bronze to carry a
razor edge is not borne out by investi-
cation. Thomas Harper of Bellevue,
Pa, challenges any one to produce a
piece of metal tempered by the an
clients that cannot be more than dupli-
Gated by any metal worker today. He
says that in examining hundreds Of
specimens alleged to have been temper
ed to the degree that steel is tempered
he failed to find any, nor had he dis
covered any one who had seen such
work, and the fable which has been
implicitly believed for centuries is be-
Ing shattered in the light of modern re-
search.
This is not the only story believed for
centuries tending to belittle the man of
today, to make him the inferior of his
forefathcrs, which failed under the
searchlight of inquiry and science. The
ancients were children in mechanical
knowledge as compared to the people
Of today. and If there was a demand
for any particular building or piece Of
work such as was produced by the an
clients 1t could be duplicated ami i'm
proved on by the skilled artisans of the
nineteenth century.-American Manu-
facturer
The Press., 1900-03-29
How He Discovered Her,

"Yes," said a noted detective, 81 have
seen a great many queer things in my
experience"
discovered a good many gigantic
frauds, ! supposeT ventured an ad-
mirer.
well, should say so," was the re-
ply. But, between you and me, the
most complete piece of deception
ever saw was woman, young, pretty
and, l would have sworn, an angel"
"But she wasn't?''
81 should say not. She has temper
like a whirlwind, and when she gets
wild the very earth seems to shake"
Good gracious! And how did you
manage to discover her true charac-
terw
"Well, I-ahem! The fact is, l mar
ried her!'
The Press., 1900-03-29
MINERS AND MORPHINE
A Necessary Custom Which Is N
Pleasant tn CoDtemDlate

A Necessary Custom Which Is Not
Pleasant to Contemplate.
when was in the northwest" said
gentleman with some money invested
In mines. Il employed a prospector to
go out into the mountains looking for
properties which had been recommend,
ed to me. One day he was to have
gone from our camp over into very
rough and rocky district, but when
evening came he reported that he
hadn't made the trip.
why not?' inquired.
because | didn't have my NOR
phine with me. he responded in very
matter of fact manner.
morphine! said in establishment
What has that got to do with it? You
are not a morphine fiend. are you?
"'Not as much of a one as you are a
tenderfoot,' he laughed and proceeded
to inform me that every prospector
who knew his business always carried
| with him enough morphine to kill a
man easily and that he did so in order
| to end himself quickly in case of an &C.
cident which would disable him far
away from assistance. There were
many Instances Of prospectors falling
| over cliffs and Gripping themselves or
breaking a leg in a hole among the
rocks or rendering themselves helpless
in some other way. and death was sure
to follow by starvation or freezing or
in some sections by being devoured by
| wolves or other wild animals. In order
to prevent such horrible death as any
Of these the prospector simplitied mat
ters by always carrying little packet
of morphine. which not only quieted
| the pain of the hurt he had sustained.
but put him to sleep pleasantly to
| wake no more on earth. 1t struck me
at first as uncanny. not to say wicked.
but I got over that feeling after mar
row escape or two, and | carried my
little tin box just like veteran would"
-WaShiDgfnn Star
The Press., 1900-03-29
THIRTY YEARS AGO.
items OF local interest taken from the columns
Of The Press, thirty years agol
April 1. 1870.

Hon. L. E. Pease OF Somers having de-
cllned the nomination for senator ten
dered him by the democratic convention,
the delegates met at the Springs House
on Monday last. Joseph e. Lathrop Of
Tolland called the convention to order,
and Hon. e. H. Hyde of Stafford was
chosen chairman, and Joseph Lathrop Of
Tolland secretary. e. A. Converse of
Stafford was given unanimous nomina-
ton.
K. o. Brown, Oate of the firm of G. &
r. 0. Brown at the Hullow) has opened
a store in the building formerly occupied
by Chaplin Bros at Staffordvllle.
J. F. Chamberlin has bought the ped
ding fixtures and stock of goods of H.
Thrall, and will hereafter be the dry goods
peddler In this vicinity.
F. j. Chandler has bought the periodl-
cal and fancy dry goods business of L. j..
Holdridge, assuming possession this week
Mr. Chandler will continue all the depart
ments heretofore carried on by Mr.. Hol-
fridge. including the circulating library.
The republicans of the east parish held
their nominating caucus on Wednesday
evening. Ebenezer G. Dennis of this viii
lage COT the firm of Dennis, Preston &
Coz was nominated for representative.
William Smith, also of this village, re-
ceived majority of the votes on an in
| fnrmal ballot, but declined the nomira
ton. The following justices of the peace
| for the east parish were nominated: A.
| G. Corpe, D. f. Fairman, s. T. Presto H.
s. E. Fairfield, j. X. Lord, John Y.
Adams, Timothy Fosket, Sidney Smith,
Harvey circuit, Milton Leonard, Charles
Warren, Jas. F. Brooks and Dennis
Scripture.
The wooden machinery at Daleville,
Wellington, has been sold to a party in
Maine. and removed there. In the fall
Of 1868 an active and enterprising com
pany commenced operations at these mills
with capital of $4,000. They did g
| thriving business in the manufacture o.
all-wool flannels, which continued with
fair success for about three years, wher
through some mismanagement,t the bust
ness of the concern became complicated
and matters grew worse until February
1867, when the company failed, business
was suspended, and has not since beer
resumed.
MISUNDERSTANDING Springs, Marcel
oath, 1870. by Rev. MEX. Bray, Franz
NJ Smith and Bertha L. Burdick.
The Press., 1900-03-29

No RIGHT TO UGLINEss. -The woman
who is lovely in face, form and temper
will always have friends, but one who
would be attractive must keep her health
If she is weak, sickly and all run dowr
she will be nervous and irritable. II she
has constipation or kidney trouble, hel
impure blood will cause pimples, blotch
es, skin eruptions and wretched com.
plexion. Electric Bitters is the best med
icine in the world to regulate stomach
liver and kidneys, and to purify the blood
It gives strong nerves, bright eyes
smooth, velvety skin, rich complexion
1t will make a gOod-looking, charming
woman Of a rundown invalid. Only 81
cents. 2
Sold by A. G. Eaton, Druggist.
The Press., 1900-03-29
Not Self Made.

Il am sorry to disappoint you, young
man." said the great railway magnate
to the reporter who had called In for
the purpose of writing him up. 'but
| did not begin at the bottom and
work my way up. never BACKED
the boots Of the engine wipers and
never carried beer for the janitor of
the roundhouse. l was kicked through
college by my father, inherited a for
tune, which invested in railroad
shares, and | hold this job because !
have votes enough to control it. 1t is
too bad, my young friend, but we can't
all be self made men. We would be-
come tiresome." And he bowed the
caller out.-Chicago Tribune.
The Press., 1900-03-29

TRUST THOSE Who HAVE Tried
suffered from catarrh of the worst kind
and never hoped for cure, but Ety. Cream
Balm seems to do even that.--Oscar Os-
from, As Warren Ave-, Chicago, I'll.
suffered from catarrh 1t got SO bad !
could not work used Ely's Cream Balm
and am entirely well A G. Clarke, 341
Shawmut Ave, Boston, Mass.
The Balm does not irritate or cause
sneezing. Sold by druggists at 90 cts. or
mailed by Ely Brothers, SO Warren St.,
New York. 8
The Press., 1900-03-29


The artist places --s---r-<ss,s s.,:: ia front of
his model and worked away rapidly on
his allegorical picture of Joy"
Uncle Ephraim." he said. IF this
picture Is a success shall give you, be
sides the half dollar ] promised. the
finest and plumpest young pullet in the
market"
A grin overspread the shiny face of
Uncle Ephraim. but the artist was dis
appointed. The result was not quite
what he had expected.
An inspiration came to his aid.
Down on South Water street this
morning" he went on, II saw the fat
test possum that was ever brought to
this town. am going to get it for
you"
"Gollyw
And the picture. was a magnificent
success. Chicago Tribune.
The Press., 1900-03-29
HIS LIFE Was SAyEp.-Mr. J.E, LII,

HIS LIFE Was SAvED.-Mr. ]. E. Lilly
a prominent citizen OF Hannibal. Mo.
lately had wonderful deliverance from a
'rightful death. In telling of it he says
II was taken with Typhoid Fever, thai
ranEinto Pneumonia. My lungs became
hardened. was so weak l couldn't even
sit up in bed. Nothing helped me. ex.
pected to soon die of Consumption, when
[ heard of DR.. Kings New Discovery.
One bottle gave great relief. continued
to use it, and now am well and strong.
can't say too much in its praise" This
marvellous medicine is the surest and
quickest cure In the world for all Throat
and Lung Trouble. Regular sizes SO
cents and II. Every bottle guaranteed.
Trial bottles free at A. g. Eaton's Drug
Store.
The Press., 1900-03-29
Lydia z. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound

cured them. H always
relieves painful periods
and no woman who SNf-
fes.s should h0 without
this knowledge.
Nearly all the ills of
women result from some
arrangement of the
female organism Mrs.
PlEslkkaasssrs great zssedS-
cine m axes WON g N
heaIfhys of this there is
overwhelming proof.
DON'T experiment. "
YOU suffer get this sssedi-
cine and get Mrs. Pink
hams free advice. Her
address is LYNN Mass.
The Press., 1900-03-29

RED HoT FROM THE GUN was the bali
that hit G.. B. Steadman of Newark
Mich, in the civil war. It caused horri.
BILE ulcers that no treatment helped for 90
years Then Bucklen's Arnica Salve
cured him. Cures cuts, bruises, burns,
hollis, felons, corns, skin eruptions. Beet
Pile cure on earth. 25 cts. box. Cure
guaranteed. 3
Sold by A. q. Eaton. Druggist.
The Press., 1900-03-29
Zinc and grinding double the wear.
Qaeer Business Combination,

VWeeF WusAMeBb COMBINATIONS.
Some Chicago men carry on at the
same time two or more different, lines
Of business. Sometimes these combi-
nations are langhable. Over the door
OF store in Wells street is a sign
which announces Wholesale Popcorn
and School Of Magic" In the window
Of an Office in Madison street Is an an
nouncement that within are to be had
Books on Love and Poultry Raising"
A South Side humorist has placard
In his basement window which reads,
Lunches Put Up and Carpets Put
Down"
The Press., 1900-03-29
Relief
from
Dreadful
Pain

Mr.. II. L. Damon, Of lS9 Division
st., Chelsea, Mass, is prominent In
Chelsea's fraternity circles. He says:
.Three years ago was In q miser-
able condition, and suffered greatly
nom the pain in my back and loins
In the region OF the kidneys. / had
NO desire for food, in fact could eat
hardly anything. sought medical
advice from several doctors, and still
found no relief. An acquaintance
advised me to try DR.. Williams Pink
pills for Pale People. / took four
boxes, and 1 can truthfully say that
the only remedy that ever gave me
reliefwas DIR. Williams Pink Pills for
Pale People. 1t is really wonderful
medicine and have recommended
Il It to many" III. l.. DAMON.
There appeared before me H. L.
Damon, and made oath to the fore
going. WILLIAM NJ. JEwETT,
Notary Public.
.ng. Williams Pink Pills for Pale People
are never sold by the dozen or hundred,
~ always In packages. At all druggists,
On direct from the Or. Williams Medicine
Co., Schenectady, N. T., 80 cents per box.
hexss $3.50.
The Press., 1900-03-29
Zinc and'grinding double the wear.

What Shall We Have for Dessert?
This question arises in the family every day.
Let us answer II to-day. Try Jell-O, a delicious
ard healthful dessert. Prepared in two min
utes. No baking add hot water and set to
cool Flavors Lemon. Orange, Raspberry and
strawberry. At your grOcers. 10 cts.
The Press., 1900-03-29
This win Interest Mothers

Mother Gray's Sweet Powders for Children
Cure Feverishness, Bad Stomach, Teething Dis.
orders, Break up Colds, move and regulate the
Bowels and Destroy Worms. They nere,' fail
Over 10000 testimonials. At all druggists. CSC
Sample mailed FREE. Address, Allen s. Ohm.
sted. LIE Roy. N. Y.
The Press., 1900-03-29
Zinc and grinding double the wear.
MANY school Children are sickly.

Many School Children are Siclxly.
Mother Gray's sweet Powder for Children, used
by Mother Gray. q nurse in Children's Home,
New York, Break mp Colds III "a hours. cure
iFeverishness. Headache. Stom Oh Troubles,
Teething Disorders, and Destroy Worms. A {
all druggists, CSC. sample mail FREE. ADJ
dress, Alien s. olmstead, LeRoy, N. r.
The Press., 1900-03-29

WORKING NIGHT AND DAY.-Tha bust
est and mightiest little thing that ever
was made Is DR.. Kings New Life Pills.
Every pill Is sugar-coated globule OF
health, that changes weakness into
strength, listlessness into energy, BRAIN
fat into mental power. They're wonder
full In building up the health. Only Csc.
per box. 8
Sold by A. O.. Eaton, Druggist.
The Press., 1900-03-29
RED BR0NCHO
MARES DEATH.

Savage Indians Of Mexico Who, Pop
nlar Tradition Says, Are Able to
Rum Down Deer-Race Between
8HoEse and . Human Greyhound
The Press., 1900-03-29
The Ruling Passion.

Wife (who has been out shopping all
day)-Oh. dear, how tired and hungry
am!
Husband = Didn't you have any
luncheon in town?
Wife-A plate of soup only. I didn't
feel that I could afford to have more.
Husband-Did you find the hat you
wanted?
Wife-Oh. yes. It is perfect dream
John, and 1t only cost $2S.-Collier's
Weekly.
The Press., 1900-03-29
Happy
Women

who have b0en relieved Of
painful zsaensfE'sEafEOn by
Lydia e. PEnkl1asa1,s Nege-
table COMPOUND are COM
sEazsfly writing grateful
letters to Mrs. PSssk1l5axsss
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1900-04-20
CROWDS AT PARIS FAIR.
Provincials and Foreigners Promen-
ade Before Empty Buildings.

Glorious weather favored the open
ing of the exposition to the general
public Sunday, and immense crowds,
numbering 250,O00 persons focked
into the grounds. The area of the
exhibition, however, is so great that
nowhere was there any crush. The
visitors were mainly composed of pro-
vincials and foreigners. Compare
lively few Parisians were to be seen.
Aware of the great backwardness of
the preparations, they remained away
for the most part.
The management demanded two en-
trance tickets for morning admission,
one for afternoon admission, and two
during the evening, when the Eiffel
Tower and the palaces, on the Champ
de Mars were Illuminated. But there
were absolutely no attractions pro-
vided, not even band of music, and
the people promenaded in front of the
empty, and in many cases, unfinished
buildings, and along roads where only
in the case of the main avenues had
the work of paving been completed.
Visitors had left the central arteries
from their pathway filled with pitfalls
and heaped with debris, some thor
oughfares resembling mere bride
paths. The crowd, however, was per-
fectly good natured and took the mat
ter philosophically. Hardly a murmur
was heard anywhere in the way of
criticism.
The moving sidewalk, access to
which cost Soc, proved a great sue
cess and was crammed throughout the
day.
The American National Pavilion re-
manned closed. So, also, did most of
the other pavilions, for the excellent
reason that their interiors are still
unfinished.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1900-04-20
CRIMINAL.

Four men were murdered and one
fatally wounded by an Italian at Wind
ber. near Johnstown, Pa, April 16, in
a drunken quarrel growing out of jeal-
ousy of a woman.
For embezzlement as a Director of
the Poor William Diebert has been
sentenced at Allentown to two years
in Jail.
William F. Miller, the "get-rich-
quick" banker, whose Franklin Syndi-
cate promised $40 per cent. dividends
per year, has been convicted in New
York.
oliver j. Bailey, a patent solicitor,
of Cincinnati, whose third trial on the
charge of misuse of the mails was
about to begin in the United States
Court, went privately to Judge Thomp-
son and entered a plea of guilty.
Two sisters, Kate and Joanna Sui
livan, living near Toledo, Ohio, were
attacked at their homes by two
masked men the other night and rob-
bed of 5000. Both women were club
bed. and one of them died from her
injuries.
The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1900-04-20
CASUALTIES.

A cyclone prevailed at Royce, Tex
as, Sunday. Twelve houses were torn
to pieces. but the occupants escaped.
BY an explosion of molten metal
at the furnace of the Ohio plant of
the National Steel Company, at
Youngstown, Ohio, James Johnston,
Wallace Alexander and Prockett
Smith have been terribly burned.
The tug Piscatauqua put in to Glou-
cester, Massachusetts April 16, tow
ing a quantity of wreckage thought to
have come from the sand schooner
Carl Schurz, which piled between Bos-
ton and Newburyport.
Rufus Wright. wealthy manufac-
turer of rubber tires, was accidentally
shot in a Chicago hotel April IA, and
died yesterday from the effect of his
wound
John c. Donaldson. a bookkeeper,
lost his life in fire at Brooklyn, New
York, April IA.