The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1900-10-05
KANSAS CLIPS AND COMMENTS.

'Ci ~ NN6 VI 'NNi'
1t is not surprising to learn that
when Rev. Easter saw Larned girl
he knew she was eggs-actly what he
wanted and married her.
The banks of Lyon county show de-
posts aggregating close to million
which is Bryanesque evidence that the
people are in hard lines.
The cold weather is not interfering
with the race for the county attorney
of Mr.. Flanel-ly OF Parsons. He is
all wo oil and warm number.
A Salina policeman tried to arrest
a crippled beggar, but the man
changed into an able bodied slugger
and it took two policemen to take
him in.
No negroes live at Severance and
emancipation day passed in such quiet
as reigns when speaker announces
at a meeting that the collection will
now be taken.
The only man so far who has fallen
victim to the wiles of the Belgian Hare
at Kincaid is the town preacher.
What text for sermon if he only
had competitor!
y Newton man don't know whether
an attempt was made to rob him or
whether the rip in his pocket book
was merely caused by crowding it too
full of green backs.
Barney Sheridan furnishes editorials
for his own democratic paper and for
the Maimi Republican, his opponent.
The latter is printing the last year 5
p1itppials nf tho Snipit
The gas drillers at Fredonia got the
hole twisted in such shape thatany gas
which might escape would come out
rilled and so new one was begun.
Kansas people are leery of gases or
wind with u twist on.
Speaking of the merits of full din
ner pail, the Osawotomie Graphic
says that all that town needs is a few
men whose whole soul is not content
with three meals daily and game of
| pitch between times.
a Greenwood county man rather got
| in the certificate business after having
his kids vaccinated and his stock in
oculated and his water de-microbed
and so had certificate of health is
sued for his nursery stock.
\ CofIey county man received news
| of his mOther-in-law' death and an
| inquiry from the undertaken whether
/ he should "embalm, cremate or bury.
| He hastily wired back. "Embalm, ere
mate, bury. Take no chances"
When early risers at Eureka picked
up the limp form of "Ginger," well
/ known colored boy vino fell out of Il
| livery hay NOW while asleep, they
| found dollar in his shoe which he
said he kept there for "luck."
At recent trial in the judicial dis
trict in which Salina is located wit
ness said he didn't know whether he
was drunk on the day in question or
not, but he knew that if he was in
Salina he was surely drunk,
A Minneapolis woman who called
up her husband over telephone in
which a man with Ii strong pipe in his
mouth had been talking has gone to
bed heartbroken over the discovery
that her husband smokes without her
knowledge.
A Florence man, who crossed the
Atlantic this summer arose early the
morning of the first day out and was
greeted by the captain. Have you
had your breakfast" asked the officer.
81 did have it," replied the truthful
man from Florence, "but | haven't it
now,
The Wilson county Citizen says
that Garnet young woman former
of Garnet iioated on raft all night
during the storm at Galveston and
gave birth to child the next day.
Both are alive and we'll and will be in
Garnett in few days. The husband
and father was drowned in the Hood.
The child's birthday anniversary will
always be celebrated with unusual in
teyest
Wichita Eagle: The Democratic
speaker had Just finished his attack on
the army and then took up the Buel
questions ELECT Bryan and on March
next he said, 'the United States
will march down to South Africa and
help the Beers lick the English" An
old man arose in the audience and
said; II do not wish to interrupt you,
but | would like to ask youa question
Thank you, sir. The question is this
How are we going to whip the British
unless we have an army Gentle
men, and fellow citizens" said the
Democratic orator, 1--WE will take VI
the subject of trusts"
The visit of Buffalo Bills show tC
Kansas has revived the old story tC
lhe following effect: Said Colone
William Bryan to Colonel William
Cody, Colonel, did it ever occur t.
you that we are very much alike? NJ!
name is William and your name il
William. live in Nebraska and you
live in Nebraska. | am Colonel ant
. you are Colonel" CHATS SO,
responded Colonel Cody, 'bu
there is one thing in which there i
great difference between us. | hav
the best show on earth and youhav
/ any"
Halls Great Discovery.
One small bottle of Halls Grea