Crawford avalanche., 1900-04-05

[c may not have chance 10 pick MS
crowd,
That happens very frequently, as
IS warden he consorts with the low.
browed
And many-stripcd inmates OF the
pen.
Chicago Record.
Periodical Enterprise.
"What makes that new magazine
Dst so much?"
II don't know. Maybe they have
, pay people not TO write war arti'
les for indianapolis Journal.
The Only Safe Method.
"Dick Dabbs is going to teach por-
ait painting by mail"
That's all right; you've seen his
ortraits, haven't youT-Indianapolis
A Friend in Need.
Jones-"A friend in need is Il great
hing"
Bones Indeed it is"
Jones-"Yes indeed; met one this
forming and he cost me So
History Didn't Mention II.
Teacher (animatedly) Now, chill
ren, who can tell me what the long
ign Of Elizabeth brought about?
Johlfny Slowboy (who thinks on
mple lines and never reflccts)-Cm-
rellas.
He Didn't Appreciate II.
Brother" said the cannibal chief,
lcetiously, lin about fifteen minutes
OIL will De in the SOUP
"Oh, dear!" groaned the missionary.
suppose that must be what people
Ill native humor."
That Hateful Girl.
ElIa--When / refused Fred he SAID
had sent him TO his death.
Stella-But he has since proposed to
e. and l have accepted him.
Ella-Then he meant a living death
San Francisco Examiner.
Her impression.
"Did you hear me sing Because
owe Your' asked the young mar
18th voice like lathe.
Il must have misunderstood mur-
lured Miss Cayenne. Il thought you
ere singing because you hated us
Washington Star
A Critical Situation.
First Warrlor-"Whipped again, say
It thou? This is our tenth successive
nfcatv
Second Warrior-.'It is, indeed! And
10 worst of it is that we have used
u all our excuses in explaining the
her ninc.'-Life.
Her Fervent Hope.
She ION their wedding tour)--What
the whistle blowing for, dearest!
Hc-I don't know. darling: but II
,ust be for either IL station or IL tun
cl
She-Oh. 10 hope it's tunnel
lcyeland Plain Dealer.
A Cruel Blow.
..You will notice that all the other
puscs in this row are occupied, said
10 real estate agent. This Is the
st one left
..Yes." retorted the cranky house
un,er. "and It's likely To- be last but
If leased. Philadelphia Press.
Getting Ready.
"My beau, said ten-ycar-old Lucy
: going TO be an Admiral"
..Is he in the Naval Academy ask
I her sympathetic aunt.
"Oh, no." replied the little woman,
he's too young for that yet. but he's
ayjnr an anchor tatooed on his arm
philadelphia Press.
A Proof of His Sincerely
"IIow shall l prove the sincerity of
" devotion:' asked the young man
,ho had been so long coming to the
pint that doubt had begun TO accu.
lulatc against him.
Call the parsOn in as Il witness.
lggestcd the young lady who meant
usiness Detroit Free Press.
A Damper on His Ardor
"What. singing so early in the morn
lg-' exclaimed the boarding-h0use
pdlady as she encountered Mr.
rarbles I'm the hall. Don't you know
S unlucky to sing before brcakfast!'
perhaps it is" replied Mr.. W., 'bu'
,mehow I never feel like singing M
r. Chicago News.
An inexcusable Omission.
Five year-old Barbara went tc
hurch one day with her two sisters
[artha and Mary. She came home
rying. and being asked why, she said
Dbbing: ~
.The man spoke all the time about
Iartha and Mary, and lie never said
ord about me-"
Accommodated Then and There.
lie was newspaper man. Late
yar news kept me down town." h<
as he entered the house