The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1900-08-09
WHY THE GERRIES TOOK GOOGLE.
A Realistic Funeral At His Home. with q Narrow
Escape for the Baby.

"Say. kids, did you hear about Google? He's
been took by de Gerries. II wuz In de paper.
De Judge said he wuz vicious. Say, I'm sorry
fer Goog. His mother trew him down Ut last
She treatened him she would and she did. DE-
last time abe tried to lick him he got out on de
fire escaIs and said he'd jump OIL, and Sh0 said
de next time she'd send fer de Gerries. Poor
Goog, His fathers on de island.
1T wuz all trew playin' we wuz havin' a fu'
ner'l Wit de baby. GOGGLES mother went on
10 do q days washin' and left Goog home tC
mind de child. And in de afternoon Goog
| come down to de door where We lads WIZ and
he says he wuzn't goin 10 be no nurse girl
And no says de kid wuz eight mon,s old anC
ought, TO know enough TO take care Of itself.
you know Doyle de undertaken? Well
Google's house Is two doors from Doyle's
store, and II WIZ a warm day and Doyle wuz
settln' out at dc door talltn' to a pleeceman
And Google says dat dey wuz q cawfln ont In
Doyle's back yard arm, and he says, 'spose
we 20 round and play funerl.' so we fellers
sneaked round and IL wuz dere, bu, none Of us
would III In IL. w WIZ all right sideways, but
we wuz too long and our feet hung out and IL
didn't seem naturl. skinny Maher took III
his shoes and We sat on him and tried To jam
him In, but II wuZ no Use.
Den Google Proposed DAT we gel de baby,
and we sneaked the cawfiin and took IL up~tair
and d. baby wuZ about six sizes to small. and
Google said dat we'd stun II wit noosepaper
where de- baby didn't reach. Den de baby
began to yell and Google batted 1t. and Mig
Marco said dat II we lad some gan TO Civ II IL
would put it in q trance. and Geezenheimer
said dat dey had some gin In der house, 80 he
went home and got II and we Civ II to de kid
Den Cioov got some starch and Wa whitened
de child's face and Mig said we ought TO have
ice to be like a real funerl, so went down
and sneaked some from a wagon and Doyle and
de pleeceman went into Mooney To get n drink
and | seys TO Goog II wuZ a good chance 10 get
some Grape while he wuz gone, SO Gooy
sneaked some Grape and a candlestick and
black cloths and we lii de candles and put de
baby in with noosepapers and ice around IL and
den we covered all de pictures with the black
cloth and We put bows on our sleeves and made
out va wuz crying. Den Goog thought dey
had 10 be Grape on de door and he went down
and tackled II up. And. say, de kid never walked
up and acted just rs naturl
wei, den, m and Mig Marco WIZ de grave
diggers and we took n fire shovel and n Ratchet
and went down in de back yard and We dug de
grave four feet long and Goog said II had 10 be
Mig went and got his mothers geraniums and
a rubber plant and we had dem all ready 10 put
on whenlwe wuz troo.
Den We went ny and GoOg was preachin
about de kid. Goog always wants 10 he every
ting. lie wuZ de father and de undertaken and
de preacher. And | said let ne be de preacher
and he could no dc gravediGger' and he swntted
| me and went on wit de prayurs. After dat we
| Ind n wake and de baby wuz getting Just M
cold rs anything and den de time come fur 20 put
on de- lid. ben we all made out we WIZ cryin
and den GOog screwed down de cover and we
wuz all de pallhearcrs. Den Mig said what
about dc hearsc? You couldn have any fun
eral witout de hearsc;' 80 we got de baby car
riage and draped II In black and we had de
feather dns,rr for a plume. Say. II WIZ out Of
! sight And den we wuz de horses and we
drawpd II 10 de grave and got de close lines
ready and de kid began to cry and Mig said IN
play n conn to life. But GoOg wanted 70 bury
II and All up de grave and put de flowers on II.
Den what do Won tink. but Goog's mother
come in and yelled and den she went N in a
fnint and Doyle and dc nleeceman conn up and
dew got de baby out and walloped Google. M
| kid wuz near froZe and n was black in de face
Don Goog's mother come 10 and she got Doyls
to hold Goo9 until she beat him all over again
| Den We told how Google made IA play funera
| and dey sent us home rnd took de Grape of do
| door and sent fer dc Gerries."