Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-11-07
HUMOR IN ENGLISH SIGNS.
ADt Quotations Used by Tradcsm~n
to Attract Attention

@Ss t"othttors Used by TralcSm IN
to Attract Attention
There Is quite n harvest OF wit and
wisdom TO be CLEANED by the observaut
eye from the notices with which
tradesmen seek To- attract custom. and
IL might also be worth the while Of
out OF the way things TO make a col
lection Of these wayside gems many
of which blush almost unseen. Many
OF the cleverest Of thes. notices which
the writer has added little by little TO
his collection consist OF really witty
adaptations OF well known Quotations
and proverbs
An enterprising cycle dealer in a
Yorkshire town. whose name is Net
tie. turns his prickly cOgnOlnen TO
business account in this singularly apt
quotation from Henry "" out OF
this nettle danger pluck the flower
satety, while cOstumer in the same
town. whose sympa iiietic name is
Love. informs his customers in let
ters half a foot lonS that Love hath
large mantle" II capacity be a vir-
tue in mantlvS. Mr.. Love deserves TO
have large sale
a provision merci.ant. again ia a
name 10 useful account by this an
nouncemeui. which speaks Tor itself"
George Herbert says Low. is n per
Sonal debt. hUt th.> Loves terms are
strict cash"
business rivalry cft>u Jc,c.. -, quite
unexpected ;c~oCrc'S OF wit aud wis
dom In mru of business. few
months ago = grocer aud provision
dealer called Little had a practical
monopoly oi the custom OF a small
town In tho M.dlauds. when. TO his
natural anuol ancc. a rival settled in
the place ANIL opened shop under the
name of John Strong Within a few
days this d:sni;icd protest appeared
In the Outra;-.'i .sroccr'S window. Man
wants bu; l..;tlo here helow'' tGo!d-
smith Bui the newcomer was "A man
OF al least equal learning and powers
OF quotation. for on the following Iav
this supplementary notice appeared In
his window: "NOr wants Tint Little
long" Goldsmith
similar story * told OF two rival to-
baccunists, the latest conner Of whom
was named FRrr. He opened fire on
his opposite rival by placing In his
window this notice: The best tobacco
by Farr." Within a few hours his RI
walls window blossomed into one large
announcement: Par better tobacco
than the best tobacco 10y Farr"
Perhaps smarter still were the rival
notices OF two watchmakers, one OF
whom was called l. Wise Mr. Wise
had adopted as his business motto. He
Is Wise that's wise In time" To this
the newcomer retortcd by this Quota
ton from Wordsworth: He Is oft the
wisest man who is not Wise at all
Many business men make attractive
advertisements by humorous play on
their names when they lend themselves
TO this purpose. The proprietor OF
wayside inn I'm one OF the home coun-
ties makes clever use OF his name.
Day. 10 attract custom. On n swing
ing sign. under n highly colored pic
ture Of the rising sun. appears this leg
end in gilt letters:
Won't you come into my parlor.
Gentle stranger, pray.
For you'll have 20 travel farther
To pas happier Day.
Another publican who boasts the Gu
riously inappropriate name of Isaac
Drinkwater has adopted this motto:
Il. Drinkwater. but my customers
drink the best of ale"
Mr.. Knott. 4 draper In n west coun-
try town. makes this appeal for Gus
tom: Many drapers are extortionate
In their prices am Knott" And not
many miles from Mr.. Knott is village
tinker whose name is Dunn and whose
modest motto is, What is done is done.
but it's not we'll done unless It's done
by Dunn"
by no means the least clever OF these
humorous trade announcements was
that OF bookseller called Hart who
supplied for many years all the books
used In local grammar school Mr.
Harris business motto was this couplet:
Who In life's race would fsin good start
Should always gct bis books by Hart
I OnlpD TIT DifS.