The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1900-08-12
THE MAJORS FOOZLB.

0rooklyn Eagle.
without the major this old shanty is
Hike a graveyard" grumbled Fred. The
old graveyard-lil1e shanty referred to was
our own handsome golf club house, the
Hnest on Long Island. Thus the adjec-
lives, If taken literally, were a bit out
or place. But such was the potency Of
the majors memory that they were not
disputed, not even by jerks, the watch
Cog Of the clubs treasury, as We called
MIN. whose sun, so 1t was said, rose by
the gable and set by the kitchen CHM
ney Of the building. The major had been
gone nearly a week. and although few
OF us doubted he would return, there were
no indications of it.
DO you know" said the colonel,
thoughtfully IT really think he will never
play here again. I know the dear old
fellow better than any Of you, I guess,
since we met at the recruiting officers
In 81, and I know his pride pretty we'll
I'm afraid It was too severe a blow to
be gotten over soon"
The colonel smiled grimley, so did a.
Few of the other fellows, while Jones,
The irrepressible, threw back his head
and gave full vent to his mirth. Watson,
one Of the newer members, had pulled
Into the circle.
Major gone!' he calculated, whats
up?"
you evidently were not here at the
match on Wednesday," said Jones, still
laughing. mo? Well the major was, but
has not been since. Indeed, we are
doubtful as to his whereabouts or his
future intentions"
Gone to the mountains" interjected
Clymer.
Thought maybe he'd taken monastic
VOWS" said Watson. dryly. What's up,
anyway" looking to the colonel.
The latter's face Strengthened out with
an effort he took tug at his whitened
mustaehe and. after pause. said slowly
and with mock seriousness;
The major left us suddenly, departing
our company because I beat him by ten
up and ten to go"
Jones roared boisterously. Said Wat
son:
''PH ring the bell If you'll tell the story.
colonel"
Said the colonel:
The major and have long been friend
BY rivals. long before I ever saw the golf
links, before Jones here and some of the
other stTiplings ever saw anything. Since
the war, in fact, as forager, when we
were both still in the ranks l had only
one superior, the major Since then 1t has
been pretty much the same thing up to
and including our entry into the golfing
ranks. Sometimes the majors trottcr
could Outstep mine; sometimes l turned
the tables And so in other things, ex-
l3pt with the fair sex. Whenever the
iaajor doomed upon the scene where there
97as pretty face in sight the major had
Inc YanQuished Sometimes 1 hung on,
but usually retreated in haste"
Yes chimed in Jones. Il remember
one night that the major came up to the
! fettee where you and the elderly Miss
/ eeems We're talking He did not have
ais glasses on then. but put them on later
after you had 'retreatedr She lives nine
} lilies from the club house, and tho major
sWOre for q week.
( Dry up, young fellow" said the colonel,
( but I could see a twinkle. "As I was say
} tng-I'H take a Scotch, high-as I was
; trying to say, the major and are always
. rivals, and since we took up golf the ri
valry has been very keen. One day the
major said to me: "Kunnel. We'll have TO
try golf. There's where skill and intel
ngence decide the day" 1 had just
thrown some dust on the majors lap robe
on the boulevard with q sorrel mare that
could do her 2:14 when rugged for It, Nat
urally he was bit huffy. So took him
up and soon afterward we started golfng
We bought our first clubs together, and
what were left in New York at that time
We have since purchased. The major,
as is well known. has upward of 600
clubs.
well, we really have never met In a
real match until Wednesday, although
some Of these youngsters Of the club
have been trying to erect something of
the kind for a long time. In an iIl-advis-
ed moment a week ago we agreed to
play eighteen holes ihe loser to set up
supper for the gallery, whatever IT might
be The major thought he was a sure
winner and invited the lower half of
Manhattan Borough to Join the merry
throng and dine-at my expense. Mod
esty never being one of my own strong
points, 1 regarded the major as easy, and
brought out the upper half OF the Dor
Ough. All of the cluD members. at least.
] so it appeared, arrived early and often,
accompanied by all Of their families, and
dOmestics, while most Of the residents of
Long island somehow or other happened
I to Jest drap in about that time. That
T gallery, my dear Watson, would have, If
drafted, made a standing army twice the
size of Germany Sat least, so it appear
ed. There was no backing out, although
we were both rather ashamed of the no.
toriety, and so we had to face the music
7 when the date finally came around I
think we both shook at the knees when
we saw the mob. That's the only word