The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1900-11-07
MANS LITTLE WAYS.

botham IN a clear, inclsvc voice, "by
the added brightness of your eye and
tho renewed elasticity OF your step |
see you.hayC had good time-you and
those other editors who went Tor q va
cation trip with the Lcaycwifcathomc
Fishing club. | don't grudgc 1t 10
YOU, dear for now | shall feel as though
| can spend Il little more time on my
visit TO my mother. We shall be gone
lust six weeks, the children and |.
Adoniram Judson will stay with his
Uncle Parker in the country, and
Mary Elizabeth will be at the Ethical
Distortion Settlement For University
Staining. The three younger ones
lake with me. Ive sent the rubber
plant to the florists, the Maltese TO
the cats hospital and the hired girl IN
to the universal. You've nothing left
but the house, and it will take care OF
itself for six weeks, | guess, il you let
it alone. But there are one or two
thingS | want you TO remember. Ale
you listening, Thomas?"
eyes, Maria.n Mr.. Shuttle b tina
is reading a newspaper.
"Well then, don't let the water
stand in the bathtub. The water gets
stale and eats the enamel and leaves Il
crease around. Ive taken the pillow
shams off the bed, Thomas, but I've
left the lace spread on in case your
mother comes around TO see if you are
comfortable. And you may smoke all
over the house, if you like, only, for
goodness sake, don't smoke in the
bedroom. 1t makes the walls smell
80 like fury-just like cooking sauer'
kraut in a flat does. Where are you
going for brcakfast--to the kOily pott
or the Bacon n Eggs restaurants"
"Maria, replied Mr.. Sh%uillcbotham
IN n tone Of calm, masculine superiority,
"I'm going to make my W coffee at
homo in the morning, and | won't
have any fuss over it, either. There's
no need Of any fuss. a man a do
everything better than a when
he sets his head to il. What's more,
I'll have coffee strong enough for once.
Women never make coffee strong
enough. Ill save money by it, too"
"Well, don't go away in the morn
ing and leave the gas turned on in the
cooker, will you? Well, then, good
by, dear, | hope you wont be
lonely without u.s."
"I'll miss you some, Of course an
swercd Shunlcbotham calmly. "But
then it will be quiet evenings and leave
me free from the thousand little do
mcstic worries that distract the u. Nj.
M.-thc powerful mascline mind-oi
the family man when he wants to
think. BY the way, III write that play
evenings while you and the kiddlcs
are gone. | know ! can write a stun
ming play, Maria"
"Yc-es; every newspaper man thinks
he can write a stunning play muir
mered Maria sadly to herself.
"What say, Maria?"
Mr.. S~hunlebolham began his career
as pro tenn widowcr.
Two days, and all was well. Mr.
Sh%uillebotham OH the second vcn
ing progressed so tar with his play
as TO complete the title page. He was
30 cXhilarated over this flow Of genlu;
that he could not 90 to sleep till late
Consequently he slumbered an houI
past his time next morning. He waket
up as if he had been shot out of a gun
and looked at his watch. "NIaria
why didn't you"- he began, when h,
suddenly remembered Maria wasn'
there.
He hurried into his garments, bollcc
the water for his coffee, made it strons
enough to hold up an ostrich egg ant
hot enough to scald the throat of a rub
Der doll INC hurried down to iinisl
the woman's page Of his newspaper
He came toward his home after office
hours with his nerves still on edge
from that coffee. The front door wa:
open. Somebody was in the house
Things were tossed about in confusion
An ov]erpowering smell of gas strucl
him - the nostrils. "A lady met hin
at the door. 1t was his landlady
She lived IN the next house, and she
wore steel bowed spcctacles and {
black gown. She eyed him with the
utmost severity.
Gus a mercy we are not all blown
up" she said. Here you went of
and left the kitchen gas burning al
day. The pressure was shut down.
the flame went out, and the gas pour.
ed out all through the houses. We
forced the basement window and got
at 1t. L suppose you were using
round all night last night and didn't
know what you were att
At the n Of the second week, when
Mr.. Shunlebotham's wash came from
Inc iauHuiS: luclc WAS nOl Il naLukcr-
chief IN the lot, although his wife had
counted a dozen white silk ones out
before she went away. Half of them
were in his various coat and trouscrs
pockets, the other half were lying
about the kitchen, where he had tossed
them into odd corners after wadding
them up and lifting the hot coffee
pot with them. His cuffs we're not
mates, and it was too much bother
to match them and put the sleeve links
in. He ceased wearing cuffs.
"What's the diff, anyhow" he said,
Pm a married man."
He forgot to empty the coffee
grounds, but tumbled the fresh in on
top of the old. The decoction was so
villainous that it upset him inwardly.
He could not write his play. lie call
ed three friends IN one evening for a
game of whist. They were good feb
lows and checred him nightly. When
he came home next evening, the APP
partition in the black gown and steel
spectacles loomed before him.
"Mr. Sh%unlebotham,n it said, "if
there's any more such carvings on as