davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1900-11-15
VT ittou f9r The Prison Mirror.

'T'fHten f9r The Prison Mirror.
"How are we this mornin', Mis-
Their Hinnesy? Ye be lookin' loike
We wer afther passin' a slapeless
noight, and We look toired SO We
do"
"Sure, Mr.. O'Tool, and it is
roight We are. Oh have been
through many a hard tonne and
,wunce OF was expearmentin' and
OF solved the problem in gravita-
ton. Ye see OF were just afther
takin' bod of brick up to the top
of Flarity's foive sthory tinament,
so OF wer, an afther OF wer on the
top, Misses Flarity sthuck her
head out of the windy and said:
"'Misther Hinnesy, phwat in
the divil makes all the schmoke?
"'Mabee Misther Flarity wer
just afther loighten his poipe.'
"'And is it to insult me, Mis-
ther Hinnesy, that We say that me
Patsy were afther maxim all the
schmoke wild his poipe.'
"'Phwat would ye be afther
dom if I we're afther insultin' We,
Misses Flarity?'
Faith and she were afther
drawin' her head in out of the
windy and maxim bee loine for
me-"
"And wer she afther We, Misther
Hinnesy?"
eye are roight she wer, Misther
O'Tool. But OF wer too many for
her. Oh slid through the hole in
the ceilin' and whit out on the
roof, so OF did,
"And phwat did Misses Flarity
do?"
"Begob. O'Tool, she shwoiped
the ladder and OF wer on the roof
all alone, all alone. Faith and OF
wer thinkin' OF wer safe, phwin OF
heard Misses Flarity hollariu:
"'Shave me! Shave me!
''And OF put me mug close to
the hole in the ceilin' and says:
'Phwat be the mather Misses FLAIR
typ
"'Shure and the house be on
foire, Misther Hinnesy.'
"'Lather co. says OF, and OF wer
1ookin' for me own safety, so OF
wer, when OF found shmall bit Of
a rope. Oh toied one ind to the
chimney and wer afther goin'
down hand over hand whin the
rope broke. And whin OF passed
the windy Misses Flarlty had her
mug sthuck out and she says:
"'Faith and are we hurt, Mis-
Their Hinnesy?'
"Says oil: 'Oi can tell We bether
afther OF sthroike, Misses Flarity.'
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1900-11-15

way. It is not true, and [ know
it." A groan of horror arose from
the family lips at this reckless
wickedness. "Well," he went on,
defantly, sit isn't, anyway. 1t
says in the Bible that every hair
of your head is numbered, and l
pulled hair out of auntie's head
and there wasn't a single number
on it."-New York Times.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1900-11-15
Do You Want Real Enjoyment

Then send FIVE cents for sample
copy of the ''Humorist," in St.
Louis, Mo. You will become
subscriber if you read one. Ad-
dress: "Humorist," St. Louis, Mo-,
enclosing five cents.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1900-11-15
NOT TO BE BEATEN.

A farmer went into grocery
store and exhibited to the eyes of
an admiring crowd an enormous
egg about six inches long, which
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1900-11-15

RdChOu Ill NOoOOIl dAA WOuAu AAOs
allow anyone to handle it, for fear
of breaking the phenomenon.
The grocer examined it with the
rest, and intending to chaff the
countryman, said:
"Pshaw! I've got something in
the egg line that will beat that"
GILL bet you a dollar you
haven't" said the farmer getting
excited.
"Right?' replied the grinning
grocer, and going behind the
counter he brought out wire egg
beaten.
''There's something in the egg
line that will beat it, I think, "
said he reaching out for the
money.
"Hold on there" said the farm
or, ''let's see you beat it,
And he handed the egg to the
grocer
The later held out his hand for it,
but dropped it in surprise on the
counter, where it broke two soup
plates and a platter. It was
Of solid iron, painted white.
"Some folks think they're
mighty clever" muttered the farm
er as he pocketed the money and
walked out, ''but faint no use
backing up against the solid fact
-Pearson's Weekly.
Some time ago a well-known
barrister had under cross examina-
ton a youth from the country who
rejoiced in the name of Sampson,
whose replies were the causes of
much laughter in the court.
"And So" questioned the bar
rister, ''you wish the court to be-
lieve that you are PEACEFUL y
disposed and inoffensive kind of
person?''
"Yas."
'And that you have no desire to
follow the steps of your namesake,
and smite the Philistines?"
mo, I've not" answered the
youth; ''and if [ bad the desire I
amt got the strength at present"
''Then you think you would be
unable to cope successfully with a
thousand enemies and utterly rout
them with the jawbone Of an ass?'
"Well," answered the rufled
Sampson, Il might have a try
when you have done with the
weapon. london Spare Mo-
ments.
It was busted theatrical man.
ager getting home on the proceeds
of his watch, and when he had
admitted as much, he was asked
by fellow passenger:
"Was the play failure, that
you got left?''
ooh, no. The play was all
right" was the reply.
"Anything wrong with the &C
tors?''
Nothing at all"
Strike streak Of bad weather
to make light houses?"
mo. Weather was all right,
and the houses were crowded.
"And no one ran away with the
boodle?'
mo, sir
Then [ don't exactly under
stand how you made a failure of
it," persisted the interrogation.
Easiest thing in the world, %
explained the busted. "We'd
been out four weeks and were do
ing smashing business, when
the old woman of the play struck
me for 81 worth of salary and
busted the show all to smash. I'd
counted on that 81 to help us fill
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
THE GREAT PRESIDENTIAL
CAMPAIGN OF 1900.

The wars of America have, heretofore.
settled affairs of state. Great questions of
policy, of national motives and national
conclusions have been answered as soon as
the battle smoke cleared away, and the
victor realized his victory. The war with
Spain is unlike its predecessors. It has
not answered questions. but has created
problems which may not be solved lightly.
These problems are being formulated by
the political parties. and before they can
be definitely settled at the ballot box it is
necessary that the people be informed in
regard to the situation. The result Of the
campaign Of 1900 will make a broad mark
upon the page of history: it will doubtless
establish the policy of the great Republic
America for quarter of century. 1t is
vastly important. therefore. that every
citizen shall study the situation through
that best of mediums, a great newspaper.
The most reliable newspaper, the best
newspaper. is the SemiWeekly Republic.
which affords comprehensive view of the
political situation in all its bearings. 1t
publishes the new news. The Semi-Week-
ly Republic is Democratic paper but it
offers to its readers the news regarding all
the political parties. and this without pre-
judice. 1t is fair newspaper. Its tele-
graph and cable news service has been
proved to be the best employed by a
modern paper. It's special features are
unsurpassed. 1t is the newspaper for the
reader who has not access to daily paper
News. features. art and literature COM
bine to make The Republics Sunday Ma
gazine specially attractive weekly maga-
| zine. The half-tone illustrations printed
in this magazine surpass anything ever
attempted by newspaper. These pro-
ducts of photography are worth the price
of the paper. Special articles by trained
writer's on the news and the subjects en-
gaging the public attention are prepared
for The Republics Sunday Magazine.
A distinctly useful and attractive feature
of this magazine is the fashion depart
ment. Always reliable and up with the
times, the ladies find the fashion page a
delight. Indeed. The Republics Sunday
Magazine appeals to every member of the
| family.
The subscription price of the Semi
Weekly Republic is 81 90 per year. The
Republic Sunday Magazine 81 1.25 per year
| Both papers are now being offered at the
very low price of s.. so for one year. To
secure this low rate both must be ordered
and paid for at the same time.
Address all orders to THE REPUBLIC,
ST. Louis. Mo.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
Political BunCOmbe.

In detailing his reasons for de
ciding against Il special session of
the assembly to tax franchises
Governor Stephens gives express
sion to some of the usual buncombc
which is the course of the state
government of Missouri. He says
that Il franchise tax is urgently
needed to equalize the burdens of
taxation which are crushing the
hopes and holdings of the agricul-
tural community.
The fact is that franchise tax
is just, because the people in the
agricultural regions are entitled to
an income from the railroads and
because the people of the cities are
entitled to an income from the use
of their streets by corporations. II
is also true that the state needs the
income, because the taxation yield
ed by the agricultural regions is
too insignificant to support the
state government. The politicians
will reply: Hush! you must jolly
the farmers if you want a franchise
tax. If they thought it was a ben
eft to the cities they would vote
against it,
What could be more senseles.
than to assume that it is necessary
to represent to the rural commun
tiles of Missouri that they are bur
dened by state taxation when they
are not! Yet so continual and lout
has been this plea of the Democrat
ic party in Missouri that, even
when it is harming the state ane
driving the state government into
penury, the politicians keep it ul
to the injury of the people who
thus are denied the advantage:
of a liberal and progressive gov
ernment.-Kansas City Star.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
oration. declaerd that the Demo-

bration, declaerd that the Demo-
cratic defeat of 1896 was due
solely to the free sill
yer crusade, and he said "a repeti-
ton of the course we pursued that
year is as absolutely certain to lead
to a worse defeat in this national
canvass as this canvass to come. "
Boies was Il 20 dollar nran IN 1896,
but he is not a Bourbon. He learns
something from adversely. Tn
doubtedly the Boies faction is
strong in the Democratic party,
but the Bryan wreckers are prob
ably still in the majority. Nobody
now alive ever saw the Democratic
party more discordant and dcmor-
allied than it is at this moment.
The situation to-day is as bad for
that organization as that was
which took place at the Charles
ton Convention of 1860. The
Cleveland men represent the Doug
las element of that year, while the
Bryanites resemble the Breckin-
ridge madmen who plunged the
party to destruction. These are
gloomy days for the hundred-year-
old Democratic party.-Globe-
Dnnocr,fic
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
in pcrpctuity to Il Democratic MI
norit,.

The criticisms of Mckinley $
administration by the two by four
Democratic papers are as vicious
as they are untrnthful, and the
writer's do not hesitate to assault
the intelligence of their readers
with more persistency than tact.
Take the rabid criticisms of Secre-
retary Cages action in having
placed the surplus funds of the
government on deposit with the
national banks to keep the money
in circulation. By doing this the
Secretary of the Treasury simply
followed an established custom,
showing no special favor to any
particular bank, but giving pre-
ference to those offering the gov
ernmcnt the greatest security for
the funds deposited, just as any
cautious business man would do
with MS own money. Not one of
the two by fours has had the hon
esty to give the facts in this case a
fair representation, but by mis-
representation and distortion they
are set before the public with the
intention to awaken spirit Of re-
sentiment against an administration
which is evidently making the best
disposition of the accruing public
funds Of the government. And
not only this. In their eagerness
to turn political sentiment against
the party in power through dis
honest criticism, they endeavor to
arouse a spirit of resentment
against all banks and bankers, the
custodians of private as we'll as
public funds. The Democratic
press of to-day breathes the spirit
of anarchy; nothing less.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
l,t,nents.

1t looks as though the Democrats
in kentucky will consummatet their
steal of the State offices, and the
party papers are cndeavoring to
mitigate tho cnormity of this pro-
iected crime by insinuating that
the Republicans are trying to
"intimidate" the partisan legisla-
ture which, under the whips Of
Goebel and Blackburn, is about
to turn out of Office Republicans
elected by a decisive vote of the
people of Kentucky. If vehement
protest, inspired by righteous in
dignation at such high-handed pro-
ceetfings, spells intimidation, .
then let us have intimidation in all
its force. The time should be past
when political crime committed
in the name of Democracy is to be
co,nloncd and passed over without
objection, even though that crime
is committed south of the Mason
and Dixon line. The Republicans
Of Kentucky must either ''intimi-
date" or sit s,,pincly down and
hand the State government over
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17

Republicans who are seeking of
fee in this county should beware of
the solicitude of their Democratic
''friends." 1t is the policy of the
Democratic workers in this county
to urge Republicans officials to
show favors to the opposition on
the ground that it will strengthen
their position in case they come
out for reelection. This is done
with no other intention than to
create disscnsion among Republi-
cans. Men who look to the Re-
publican party for election to Office
in this county must be faithful to
the party or they will only succeed
in electing their Democratic op-
DOnentS.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
ITEMS OF INTEREST.

Smallpox has broken out at Poplar
Bluff.
The Missouri penitentiary now holds
2.22i1 cOnYicts.
The home of George Huskey. of De
Soto, was destroyed by fire on the
night of the 9th inst.
The Lemp Brewing Co. IS depot at
FredericktOWn was mysteriUusly
burned early on tee morning Of the
18th inst.
S. o. Brockman, of BCnhe Terre,
died on Jan. 18th, from the effects of
overdose Of morphine taken to relieve
a headache.
Mrs. Caroline Collier. aged Il years,
an old and highly respected resident
of Bismarck, departed this life Mon
day. January Stll. 1900.
Mr.. Geo. Sage. {: farmer living about
two miles north Of bismarck. had a
we'll drilled recently to depth of 20
feet, and the last feet were through
solid lead.
4. J. Virgins, living near Mill
Springs, Mo-, was assassinated by an
unknown person on Jan. I'd. while on
his way home from Mill Springs. Wig
gins was recently pardoned from the
Denitentiary, and had a record as a
bad man.
\ new a6 900 Jail has just been COM
pleted in Bollinger County. Last
Wednesday night. Charles Wilson.
confined therein for burglary, picked
the lock Of the cell. kicked the bricks
out of the wall took the dials to the
combination locks and made his es-
cape.
Missouri has the smallest married
and Mrs. Willie Ray. of Dunklin
County. who have just returned home
to spend the winter, having been
with the Sells Bros. Show last year.
They are each three feet tall and
weigh ordinarily about 3s pounds
each.
st. James, Mo-. had a destructive
tire on the night Of the 1th inst
Among the buildings burned was the
Central Hotel. Otto Rains. travelling
sal eSman for the Ely-Walker Dry
Goods Co.. of st. Louis. and Rev
Theodore Frieck. a Lutheran minister
whose home was near Rolla, guests OF
the hotel, were burned to death.
a rOmatic meeting occurred be
tween Mrs. NJ. Nolan and her brother
Patrick Carrigan. on last Tuesday. Mr.
Carrigan is d wealthy ranchman OF
North Minnesota. He left his home
| when but ID years Of age and is now
50 years old. He was supposed to have
been dead, nothing having been Eeart
of him during the b years. He will
| remain here for several weeks and ther
return to his home. The meeting be
| tween the long separated brother and
sister was a pathetic One.-De Soto
| Facts.
The city authorities Wednesday re-
ceived notice from the authorities a.
Jerseyville, H., that a man answering
to the description of Ross Martin, wa
under arrest at that place. Martin j,
wanted here for tie murder of Office
Willis bearing. The Jerseyyille au
thorities were asked to hold the sus
pect unit: John bearing, Il brother 0
the murdered officer. could reacl
Jer>eyvile and identify the man if h
| is Martin. They responded that th'
prisoner was under sentence for SOM
crime committed at JerSeyvile ant
that his sentence will not expire un
til March. John Dearing left Thurs
day to determine if possible the man
| identity. DE Soto Press.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
The St. Louis Globe Democrat !

The St. Louis Globe Democrat is
unquestionably one of the greatest
of American newspapers. 1t has
correspondents everywhere and
covers every field Of news. foreign
and domestic. 1t is strictly Re
publican in politics, but it is, above
all, a newspaper, and ought to be
in every home during the impor-
tant presidential campaign of 1900.
The price by mail, Daily, including
Sunday, is Six Dollars per year.
Daily without Sunday, -Four Dol
lars per year. Sunday only. Two
Dollars per year. Weekly, issued
in Semi Weekly sections, One Dol
lar per year. The latter edition is
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17

About the biggest piece Of bun
combe of recent date is St. Louis
opposition to the opening of Chica-
go's drainage canal. Why did the
former city wait until Chicago had
spent millions to complete the can
al before it took measures against
havi0g it perform the function for
which it was built!
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
ENECITOR.S NOTICE

Notice is hereby given, that letters
testamentary on the estate of John
Meyers, deceased, were granted to the
undersigned on the 18th day Of Janu-
ary, 1900, by the Probate Court of
Washington County. Mo. All persons
having claims against said estate are
required to exhibit them for allow
ance to the executor within one year
after the date of said letters, or they
may be precluded from any benefit of
such estate. and if said claims be not
exhibited within two years from the
date of said letters, they will be for
ever barred.
HYRCANUs HAWKINS. Executor.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17

The Bryanite press is fond of as
serting that the wage-earner is
getting none of the benefits of the
general advance in the prices of
commodities, yet we notice that
the Pennsylvania iron workers have
had their wages increased A per
cent in the past ten months alone.
It is clear our Bry ante friends
esteem plain, but monumental
lying their best political capital.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
HEALTH AND
ACCIDENT
INSURANCE.
Fidelity Mutual Aid Assn.
SAN TEAOiSCO, CAL.

For Five Cents Per Oar
VIII pay. according to the hazsfd sH
occupation, from $S to $25 week whoa
unable to work through being bHz1
accidently.
Will pay, if you are accidently kasxs
$20S to 1850.
viii pay SO 4 week when yex xze
sick and unable to work
VIII pay s'00 for funeral experses-
Will pay, if you lose hand and 3, H
or both feet or both hand, sI3S Is Mfs
If INSURED.
! on cannot lose all your income v}le =
you are sick or disabled by acc;dess.
Absolute protection to the ,reuF,
upon paying So life mcInbe rship !oex z, Il
dues OF 81 90 per month.
The Fidelity Mutual Aid ASs,s5sk;r q
is pre-eminently the largcst aaA
strongest Accident and Iealth AS.sr
clatlon in the United States.
1T has the required casl, dex1f-S
with the States Of California and Il ~
rouri. which, together with an sask =.
seserve fund and large assets. marT4
certificate an absolute guarantee -
the solidIty OF its protection u f.s
members.
A two-thrds policy costs 81 p-..
month dues
a one-third policy costs sI.5s ,s1
quarter dues
Reliable agents wanted. Write
CHAS. W. SHIELDS
Sole Agent, Washington County,
Potost, Xn
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
The Democracy's Day of DisCord.

The Jackson day celebrations
bring out in a strong light the dis
cord and decentralization which pre-
vail in the party of which Jackson
was one of the founders. Grover
Cleveland, the only man the Demo
craticparty has elected President for
forty years, in letter written for
publication on jackson day, de-
clares he wishes it was to be print
ed at time ''when saner councils
prevailed in the party which he
(Jackson) did so much to strength
en- and place upon tirmer founda-
TONS ''It seems to me-" the cX-
President adds, ''that the inconsis-
tency of unreasoning and false par
ty leadership is impressiyely exhib-
tied when the claim is made that
Jacksonian Democracy sanctions
the degradation of the peoples cur
rency and a reckless disregard of
the restraints of law and older."
This is the voice of the lights of the
old Democracy-of the Democratic
party which Jefferson and jackson
created and led, and which govern
ed the United States, except for
one or two short intervals, from
1901 to 1861.
Another prominent Democratic,
in a banquet at Omaha, was max
ing an appeal at celebration of
Jackson day for a reaffirmation of
the Chicago platform of 1896, and
for new crusade in favor of base
money. This was William j.
Bryan. TO Bryan the defeat of
himself and his cause in 1896 and
the prosperity which that over
throw brought to the country
means nothing. He is as devoted
to the SOC dollar now rs he was
four years ago, and he wants to
put in the platform of 1900 an
other doctrine which would be
as abhorrent to Jefferson and Jack
son as dishonest money would be.
This is the doctrine of territorial
contraction. Bryan wants the flag
to be pulled down in the Philip
pines, and he urges this while pre-
tending to be devoted to the men,
ory of Jefferson, who got the
Louisiana province from France,
and he urged it at celebration of
a day dedicated to the memory of
the man who upset Spanish sovcr-
eighty in Florida and constrained
Spain to make the treaty with the
United States which gave Florida
to this country. The placing
Of Bryan in juxtaposition with
Cleveland will show the wide di-
vergcncc which the Democratic
party has made in the past few
years from the creed Of its found
ers.
The suicidal course which Bryan
recommends to his party is not
without a strong opposition from
an element of the party which
urged it four years ago. Ex-Gov.
Boies, also at a Jackson day cele
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17

Bryan in q recent statement as
serted that under American rule
the Filipinos must become either
citizens or subjects of the United
States. That may he true, but in
the South we have somewhat
similar case, where the negro is
nominally a citizen of the United
States, but practically only a
subject of the Democratic party.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17
Homes for Boys Wanted.

We have on hand very fine lot of
boys of all ages from one month to
twelve years of age. We are putting
them out in carefully selected homes.
They are placed on three months
trial. All it costs to get one is the
transportation. References required.
For terms address Rev. David Gay,
$40 Olive street, St. Louis, Mo-, State
Superintendent of the Children Home
Society
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17

A Democrat is no better than
his party; he endorses all the bad
and vicious policies the party ad-
vocates. This holds good with the
Democrat who runs for a county
Office as we'll as the one who runs
for President. They all look alike
and vote alike.
Potosi journal. (Potosi, Mo.) 1894-1929, 1900-01-17

a big semi-weekly paper, almost
equal to the average Daily at the
price of the average Weekly. 1t
not only gives all the news, but
also a great variety of interesting
and instructive reading matter for
every member of the family. Write
for free sample copies to the Globe
Printing Co., st. Louis, Mo.