davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
.rne Boatman,s Turn.

A boatman in the north Of England
having Eeen engaged to row reverend
gentleman over rough part Of river,
was very much annoyed at the manner
he was addressed by the clergyman,
the conversation commencing thus:
Clergyman-My dear man, have you
ever studied geology"
Boatman-No, sor; Aa hewitt.
Clergyman-Well. my friend, that's
part Of life lost, but you will proba-
bly, know little theology Z"
Boatman turning quite irritable
No; Aa knaw nowt ABBOTT that either.
Clergyman Well, that's another part
Of life lost, my man.
Nothing more was said, as the water
was turning very boisterous and they
were in great danger, when suddenly
the boat gave lurch and was cap.
sized.
The boatmaa, being an expert swim.
mer, took the situation quite coolly,
while his companion, who knew moth
ing Of the art of swimming, was strug-
Cling for life. The boatman, who was
making good progress toward terra
firma, accosted the clergyman with the
following:
IA say, mister, do We know onny-
thing ABBOTT 'swimology 2 /"
NO, my man; / don't"
"Wey, what a pity" said the boat
man; there's al whole life lost
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
PEPPERTON.
".SLIM JIM"

Mrs. Ernest Pushor was very sick the
past week.
L. 81. Pushor returned from the woods
last Saturday.
Joe Ernst has been shipping hay the
forepart of the week
Mr. and Mrs. Geo. Pushor spent Christ
mas with Mr.. and Mrs. G. Towner.
Miss Maetie Heating closed her school
last Friday with the following program
The opening address, Observation-Disclosures
Fisher. Singers Invitation; son g-schoo1.
Do your best; recitation-Joseph Cans:
Frost spirit; northumberland Pushor:
My Kitty; song-Li11ian Heating, Ruth
Pushor, Katie Fisher and Minnie Peterson:
The inquisitive boy; recitation-John
Cans: The camel land; recitation-Katie
Fisher: The tardy scholar; recitation
Leo Griffith; Oh! Come away; song
school: Industry; essay-C1aud Heating:
The ships coming home; recitation-Ruth
Pdshor: The poorb black chicken; recita-
ii on-Li1lian Heating: Where is Ohio;
Observation-Disclosures Fisher: A little boys
saying; recitation-Hubert Cans: Lazy
John; s9ng-schoo1: Pluck; essay-Li1-
Liam Keating: Wall of Ounce; recitation
-Cluad Heating: Lover without arms ;
recitation-Katie Fisher: Evange1ine
recitation-schoo1: Mary's Ram; recita-
tion-Fritz Cans: Room among the
angels; song-schoo1 Comfort one an
other = recitation-Mary Fisher Fame;
essay-Katie Fisher: Entertaining my
sisters beau; recitation-Li11ian Heating;
Independence bell; neutrality-suspicious.: A
sharp tool; recita tion-Everett Pushor:
The closing ode-by the school.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
DONNELLY.

i We extend A Happy New Year to all.
| r. w. Harrison spent the holidays at his
parental home.
Remember the dance i'll the NJ. w. A.
| hall New Years eve. All are invited.
Miss Minnie Hymu1 departed for Mas
| sau, Mimi, Sunday to spend the holidays.
Mr.. Andrew Ko1odzy is visiting St.
Cloud friends and relatives the past week.
A dancing party was hell at the resi-
dence ofMrs. Joseph Haight last Tuesday
night.
Mrs. S. H. Davis spent Christmas in
Marble Rock, Iowa, visiting friends and
relatives,
Chas. c. Johnson our genial 1umberman
| spent Christmas at his parental home at
G1enwood.
A Christmas tree was held in the Luth-
eran church last Thursday evening,
number Of Donne1lyites were in attend
ance. VA
Church services are held every other
Wednesday in the Donnel1y school house,
by Rev. Murray, of Herman, all are invit-
ed to be present.
A delegation of Donne11y Woodmen
went to Herman last Monday evening,
and attended the meetingof Herman
Camp No. 1911 NJ. w. a.
Mr.. and Mrs. Elmer Taisey and family
of Finley, N. D., is visiting relatives and
friends in this vicinity, the guests of their
parents, Mr.. and Mrs. A. H. Taisey of this
place.
Installation of officers in Donnel1y
Camp No. 1868 NJ. w. A. takes place Thurs
day evening, Jan. 5rd 1901. All members
are requested to the present. W. ]. Har-
tung, clerk.
The Christmas tree last Monday even
ing was a success in everyway. Many re-
ceived valuable presents, the following
was the program of the entertainment
Rotations and singing and the exhibit
ton of Santa Claus.
"SLIM JIM"
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
ADVICE From . Butcher.

What the newspapers should do is
to devote less space to describing what
people should wear and more to what
they should eat" remarked the butch
er. 'Fashionably dressed women come
in here every day who don't know lamb
from mutton or hen from a rooster.
No wonder men have dyspepsia! I find
that men know more about the quality
OF food stufs than women do. Many
of the latter don't even know the few
simple tests that might help them to
distinguish an old fowl from young
one, and about meat they're greener
yet. A young woman came in here the
other day and asked for two pounds of
veal outlets. showed her the loin !
proposed to chop the outlets from, and
she remarked. Yes; that's very nice,
but isn't it rather thick to fry? -
Philadelphia Times.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
rne Average Lawsuit.

There is nothing more ridiculous than
the average lawsuit. Two men dispute
over few dollars and go to law. Both
are sure to lose. Their neighbors are
dragged in as witnesses, and the costs
amount, to 10 or 20 times the amount in
dispute Frequently these lawsuits
ruin families and start quarrels that
last for years. Some men claim it is
principle" that actuates them in these
lawsuits. It is bullheadedness, pure
and simple, 1t is nearly always easy
to "split the difference"
Another bad feature about these law
suits. is that the county is put to con-
siderable expense, and men willing to
work are compelled to sit on the jury.
Settle your disputes without going to
law. If the man with whom you are
disputing is not willing to "split the
difference" he will probably accept q
proposition to leave it to three neigh
bors. -Atchison Globe.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
rne ..Camepu Ha1rn nrusn.

Contrary to the belief Of most peo
pie, the cameps hair brush used by art
lists has nothing Of the camel In 1t, =
said manufacturer Of soft brushes to-
writer the other day. 'NThere was a.
time when real cameps hair was used.
for the purpose. Tho ship of the des
ert, however, has long been superseded
by the homely little squirrel. Not only
is squirrels hair very much less costly,
but it is better, softer, more pliable and
far more durable. At the present day
it is doubtful If you could find pound
OF camel's hair in all the brush facto-
ries in this country. However, there is
no cause for fear that the graceful lit
tie squirrel will be exterminated. It is
the European squirrel that furnishes
the hair for the brushes, the covering
Of the American squirrel being too fur
~ and soft for the purpose. WASH
ington Star.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Bicycle Horse Book contains mora
ahorse sense" than many volumes ten
times its size. It tells all about
breeds, about feeding and watering,
stable and road management, Of
whims and vices, of harness, of d.
seases and remedies, of breeding, Of
colt education, Of shoeing, and indeed
it covers the whole subject III CON
else, practical and interesting man
ner. It contains 1913 pages, is pro-
fusely and beautifully illustrated,
and handsomely bound in cloth.
Every man or woman who drives a
horse should have copy. The price
is so cents, by mail; address the pub
fishers, Wilmer Atkinson Co.,, Phil
ndelpbis.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
Origin of "soldier.''

s'Soldier," writes Grammaticus In
the Liverpool Daily Post is a pedigree
word. It's connection with the queens
shilling may not be obvious, but there
it is, all the same. Shilling in Low
Latin is "solidus," whence comes sol
dunn, wages The man who fights
for sodium is soldier" In Wye
IFS New Testament Guke Iii, 1N
John the Baptist bids the soldiers to
..be apayed with your sowdis" ('be con-
tent with your wages''l, ''sowdis'' be-
ING the north country rendering OF SOL
dis" like ''owd'' from odd"
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
Personal PICK-UPS.
Little Items Of Interest About Morri.

Little Items of Interest About Morris
! People.
Hugh Spur was up from st. Paul
on Christmas Day.
Will Grandjean was visiting friends
in town yesterday
Ferdinand Danielson is spending
the holidays with his parents.
A. Fl. Orr came down from Brock
enridge to spend Christmas at home.
Thos. Calvin spent Christmas at
home, returning to st. Paul Wednes-
day.
6. G. Thorpe and son Clarence, of
Hancock, we're Morris visitors Thurs
day.
Clarence Randall, of Hamline, is
the guest of relatives here during the
holidays.
Charley DeKay is home from the
State University to spend the holiday
vacation.
Attorney G. B. Marvin, Iof Mime
apolis, was in town on legal business
yesterday.
Augustus Reeves, of Milbank, S.
D., is the guest of Mr.. and Mrs. w.
L. Colyer.
Miss Clara B. Cogel, Of Red Wing,
is visiting her brother, Geo. F. Cogel
and family.
Hilfred Thomasson is spending the
holidays visiting his parents, Mr.. and
Mrs. T. Thomasson.
Patrick Vaughan and Bert Horri.
gan, of Scott, are home from the
University for the holidays.
Col. and Mrs. March returned to
Litchfeld Wednesday, after Christ
mas visit with Mr.. and Mrs. Ell. FL.
Wells.
Miss Nellie Moran and Miss Fan
ME Hagerman, who have been teach
ing in Starbuck, are at home for the
holidays.
G. M. Hill was over from Grey
Eagle to spend Christmas at home.
Mrs. Hill accompanied him on his re-
turn Wednesday.
Rev. Northrup has returned from
Mankato, where he went to attend
the wedding of his sister, Mrs. Glas-
gov, to Mr.. G. M. Fiero.
Mrs. j. E. Waldhof and daughter
Maud, of North Branch, arrived in
Morris Christmas day to visit with
his parents, Mr.. and Mrs. Ellsworth.
W. FL. Reker has gone to Chicago
to remain for a month. He will visit
with old acquaintance and expects
TO also find some purchasers of
Stevens county land.
Harry Berger left for Chicago on
Wednesday to take his examination
for apprentice in the navy. He
expected to leave for San Francisco
with company of thirty others last
night.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
The Christmas exercises of tn.

The Christmas exercises of the
Congregational Sunday School we're
unique and interesting. The special
feature of the "Arctic Pole" was very
prettily carried through, The deco
rations of the church were arranged
with much care and artistic skill, and
with the brilliant Christmas tree
made pleasing spectacle. That the
little folks as we'll as the older ones
enjoyed the affair goes without say
ing.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
spinsters.

Unmarried women are called spin
sters, or spinning women, because 1t
was a maxim among our forefathers
that a young woman should not marry
until she had spun enough linen to fur
nish her house. All unmarried, old or
young, were then called spinsters, q
name still retained in all legal docu.
ments.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Eiler's Uncle Toms Cabin Co.
played to a good house on Christmas
night. The play was well presented
and the specia,ties were remarkably
good. The presentation Of moving
pictures in connection with Uncle
Toms Cabin is rather homogeneous,
but the pictures were nevertheless
attractive and instructive.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
TWO Great objects.

seThey say" remarked the very Gym
zeal person, that in this corrupt and
superficial age the great object is not
to be found out
"That shows you have very little ex-
perience with bill collectors answered
the impecunious friend MY great OBJ
ject is not to be found in" Washing
ton Star.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

The Eastern Star reception and
dance on Thursday evening was such
pleasant occasion as is always en-
ioyed whenever the Eastern Star
ladies undertake social function.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

The card party given by the
Knights of Pythias on Wednesday
evening passed off very pleasantly.
A large number of the Knights and
ladies were present, and soon became
deeply interested at the card tables.
Mr.. and Mrs. G. A. Dushek had
charge of the refreshments and
served an elaborate repast. The
latter part of the evening was spent
in dancing.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

j. D. Good has received the finest
stock of furniture that was ever
brought to Morris, while his line of
chairs is simply magnificent. You
are invited to call and examine the
stock, whether contemplating buying
or not.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Miss Grace Hall is guaranteed at
the home of G. Parlin in st. Paul
with very light case Of small pox.
R. j. Hall went toSt. Paul Saturday,
on learning of Miss Grace's sickness.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
When Travelling East or South.

Remember that Wisconsin Central
Railway trains leaving st. Paul and
Minneapolis daily for Milwaukee,
Chicago and Manitowoc, connect with
all eastern and southern lines. Fur
Their information from nearest ticket
agent.
Jas. G. P md, g. P. A.
Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

There will be watch meeting at
the Methodist church on next Mon
day evening, New Years Eve. The
service will begin with a song service
at $50 p. m. All are invited.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

A letter has been received from
Rev. Mr.. Brown, of Glenwood, that
he will make decision on the call
from the Congregational church Of
this place in the the course of a
couple of weeks.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

DIR. Seth Arnold's Cough Killer for
Arthma cannot be equalled. IS. B.
Gillespie. Gu1hrie Center, Iowa
Hulburd 81 johnson.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

B. W. Brokaw, eye specialist and
optician will be at Krueger's drug
store the 9th, 9th, 10th and 22nd, of
every month. Eyes examined free.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

y Art thou one Of the many that has
Grained the Golden Nectar that max
eth thy heart full OF strength and
gladness? If not, take Rocky Noun
tain Tea. --Hulburd & Johnson.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Just received new loc Of weather
strips. Have them put on your
doorf and windows. e. E. HILL.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

When you are buying anything in
the line of jewelry, you want good
goods. Go to Lund's.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Bright eyes are an infallible index
to youth, nice windows from which
Cupid shoots his arrows. Rocky
Mountain Tea makes bright eyes
lHulburd & johnson.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Insure against fire, lightning and
tornado with Fred E. Smith. He
writes in the best companies at
reasonable rates. 4t
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Mr.. and Mrs. E. j. Jones enter
tanned at dinner on Christmas Day
DR.. and Mrs. Hu.burd, Miss Cora
Huldurd, Misses Ida and Nellie Bor-
rill and Prof. Holden,
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Insure against fire, lightning and
tornado with Fred E. Smith. He
writes in the best companies at
reasonable rates. 1t
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Do you own horse? Then gel
Bicycle Horse Book. Price, so cents
Wilmer Atkinson Co., publishers
Philadelphia, Pa.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Fl. B. Lund will sell silver ware,
watches, clocks, rings and jewelry
much cheaper than ever before this
y3af, ''
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

~
Mr. Dudley H. Hersey, who recently died in ST. Paul. was
insured in The Mutual Life Insurance Company of New York
under four policies egang and this amount was
paid the benefcares under the policies the 18th of
October 1900 The aggregate net premiums paid were
$I3,239.8o showing profit Of 100000 in adj
diton to the protection afforded during an average of 10
years.
No other investment safe and certain to return
some profit with the probability of very large Profits as
policy in The Mutual Life Insurance Company of New York
the oldest largest strongest and best life company
in the world
E. W. PEET & SON, Managers,
Manhattan Big,
ST. Paul, MIMI
L. c. Spooner, Agent,
Morris, MINI
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
Farm Journal
s Years.
This Paper
One Year.
Ply UP AND GET BOTH PAPERS At PRICE
OF ONE.

We want to get 500 new Subscribers
to our paper, and are going to do it it
IRE can; ire therefore con time our ar.
yanpemer1t With the Farm Journal By
which NE can send THE TRIBUNE and
The Farm Journal, 5 years, both for
$3.50. And we make the same offer to
All old subscribers who will pay all
arrearaees and one year in Advance.
You know what our paper is, and the
Farm Journal is a gem-practical, pro-
gressive-a clean, honest, useful paper
full of gumption, full of sunshine, with
an immense circulation. among the best
people everywhere. You ought to take it.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Mrs. S. Stewart entertained at a
hidden musical on Thursday.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Robert Kinner is visiting friends
and relatives at Austin for couple
of weeks. During his absences,
Operator A B. Wells is acting as
agent
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Rockford silverware, guaranteed
for twenty years, for sale at Lund's.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

f. E.. Smith moved to his new
Office over Stebbin's store on Thurs
day. He extends an invitation to
all lis friends, both old and new, to
call.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Lund sells jewelry and silverware
at prices that suit you.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Preparations are being made for a
concert to be given for the benefit of
the Episcopal church on the evening
of Thursday, Jan. II.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Best silver polish for sale by H. B.
Lund.
Rooms to rent at the Central
House. Inquire of ]. D. Good.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

AS previously announced, the
Woodmen will haye installation of
officers followed by Smoke social'
next Tuesday evening.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

You will miss it if you do not see
Lund's line of silverware before buy
ing.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Third annual military ball Of Co. !.
at the arlnory next Wednesday even
ing.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
NOTICE.

We are going to send you soon a sample
of the Farm Journal free, and let it speak for
itself. Look ont for it,
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

! Next Wednesday afternoon, Jan. q
the Elizabeth Reem Circle will met
with Mrs. Torpey for installation OF
officers.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29

Hans Christopherson and Emma
Huff, of Benson, were married by
Rev. Paul Whittier on Monday even
ing.
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
Mrs. Fowler and Mrs. Caswell en-
tertained yesterday afternoon.

IM rs. FOWl0r ana NILS. CaSW0ll Oh
tertained yesterday afternoon.
Mrs. S. Stewart entertained at
hidden musical on Thursday.
Third annual military ball Of Co. !
at the arlnory next Wednesday even
ing.
You will miss it if you do not SCI
Lund's line of silverware before buy
ing.
Hans Christopherson and Emma
Huff, of Benson, were married by
Rev. Paul Whittier on Monday even
ing.
Next Wednesday afternoon, Jan. 2
the Elizabeth Reem Circle will mel
with Mrs. Torpey for installation o.
officers.
AS previously announced, the
Woodmen will haye installation o.
officers followed by a smoke social
next Tuesday evening.
Preparations are being made for {
concert to be given for the benefit Of
the Episcopal church on the evening
Of Thursday, Jan. II.
#. E. Smith moved to his new
Office over Stebbin's store on Thurs
day. He extends an invitation to
all lis friends, both old and new, to
call.
Robert Kinner is visiting friends
and relatives at Austin for couple
of weeks. During his absencs,
Operator A B. Wells is acting as
agent.
Mr.. and Mrs. 3. j. Jones enter
tanned at dinner on Christmas Day
DR.. and Mrs. Hu.burd, Miss Cora
Huldurd, Misses Ida and Nellie Bor-
rill and Prof. Holden.
There will be a watch meeting at
the Methodist church on next Mon
day evening, New Years Eve. The
service will begin with song service
at $50 p. m. All are invited.
The Eastern Star reception and
dance on Thursday evening was such
a pleasant. occasion as is always en-
ioyed whenever the Eastern Star
ladies undertake social function.
Miss Grace Hall is guaranteed at
the home of He. Parlin in St. Paul
with a very light case of small pox.
r. J. Hall went toSt. Paul Saturday,
on learning ofMiss Grace's sickness.
A letter has been received from
Rev. Mr.. Brown, of Glenwood, that
he will make decision on the call
from the Congregational church Of
this place in the the course of a
couple of weeks.
Eiler's Uncle Toms Cabin Co.
played to good house on Christmas
night. The play was well presented
and the specia,ties we're remarkably
good. The presentation Of moving
pictures in connection with Uncle
Toms Cabin is rather homogeneous,
but the pictures were nevertheless
attractive and instructive.
The card party given by the
Knights of Pythias on Wednesday
evening passed off very pleasantly.
A large number of the Knights and
ladies' were present, and soon became
deeply interested at the card tables.
Mr.. and Mrs. G.. A. Dushek had
charge of the refreshments and
served an elaborate repast. The
Morris tribune., 1900-12-29
MORRIS MARKETS.
Corrected to Saturday Morning.
ON THE CITY CIRCUIT.
SATURDAY, DEcEr1BER 20, 1900.

SATURDAY, DECEr1BER 20, 1900.
Best silver polish for sale by Fl. B.
Lund.
Rooms to rent at the Central
House. Inquire of J. D. Good.
Lund sells jewelry and silverware
at prices that suit you.
Rockford silverware, guaranteed
for twenty years, for sale at Lund's.
When you are buying anything in
the line of jewelry, you want good
goods. Go to Lund's.
Just received new loc Of weather
strips. Have them put on your
doorf and windows. e. F. HILL.
H. B. Lund will sell silver ware,
watches, clocks, rings and jewelry
much cheaper than ever before this
year. r.
sS' ss zas771 - - ~ a5 az
Insure against fire, lightning and
tornado with Fred E. Smith. He
writes in the best companies at
reasonable rates. 1t
Do you own horse? Then get
Bicycle Horse Book. Price, so cents.
Wilmer Atkinson Co., publishers,
Philadelphia, Pa.
Insure against fire, lightning and
tornado with Fred E.. Smith. He
writes in the best companies at
reasonable rates. At
B. w. Brokaw, eye specialist and
optician will be at Krueger's drug
store the 9Th, 9th, 10th and 22nd, of
every month. Eyes examined free.
DIR. Seth Arnold's Cough Killer for
Arthma cannot be equalled.-S. B.
Gillespie. Gurhrie Center, Iowa.
Hulburd g. johnson.
Bright eyes are an infallible index
to youth, nice windows from which
Cupid shoots his arrows. Rocky
Mountain Tea makes bright eyes
Hulburd & johnson.
u Art thou one of the many that has
Grained the Golden Nectar that max
eth thy heart full Of strength and
gladness? If not, take Rocky Noun
tain Tea. -Hulburd & Johnson.
The daily morning Alaskan., 1900-04-04
Dissolution Notice.

Notice is hereby given that the partnership heretofore existing under the name oi the MOorc Wharf Co, the said partners being the AlaskanS Northwestern Territoues IradingNOp |. Bernard Moore and William Moore, has been dissolved, William Moore fetir,ng. said bust. ness will continue Co he conducted hv snd Alaskan NOrthwdstern Territories Trading tu, and l. Bernard Moore under the same title. All persons having claims against the late partner ship are requested to send the same Co the General Manager, ..
 S-iS-im CT. WNNN.IOHNsoN'