davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26
ANXIETY OVER A ToMCAT.
Mystery which Was Explained by
Wall street Man.


Wall street Man.
1t was IN a broadway pharmacy. A
reporter was waiting with others when
the druggist stepped TO the telephone
and, after getting the number he called
for, said.
what il that tomcat dongW
lie listened with apparent excitement
and added
How is Spinach
After holding the receiver TO his ear
for few moments he rang off and
started to attend To his customers. He
seemed nervous, however. and finally
excused himself in the midst of filling
an order and called up the same num-
Der on the telephone again.
Sell my tomcat Mt the market" he
said as soon rs he had some one Mt the
other end
Then he returned to his customer
with apparent ease of mind. The re-
porter wondered what the druggist
meant by this strange conversation I'M
til it was explained by Wall street
speculator "Tomcat." II seems. Is n
pet name among brokers for Tennessee
Coal and Iron stock. Spinach Is the
familiar name for Southern Pacific.
The druggist had evidently bought
'tomcat' low, and his excitement was
caused by his eagerness to take prof
Its"
These are not the only stocks that
have pet names In the street" Peo-
PIES Gas OF Chicago is known rs Post
office" and brooklyn Rapid Transit Is
known among many Ms Little Manhat-
tan The names are not the same In
all brokers' offices. The jargon ena-
bles customers to give orders over the
telephone TO their brokers with Ger,
tain amount of secrecy. The practice
Is rs old rs the mnrkct"-Ncw York
Mall and Express.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26

5year-old boy went with his moth
cr to make call The lady of the
house, who was fond OF children. told
him she meant to ask his mother to let
her have him Don't You think your
mother would let me buy YOU she
asked
no. ma'am,' answered the little
fellow; you haven't got money
enough"
How much would 1t taket" she con
tluuod
"Three bundled dollars" said the boy
promptly, rs il that would settle the
matter Mt once for all.
oh, well. then said the woman. Il
think can manage H. If | can, will
You come and stay with meg"
No, m2'aln." he said, with decision.
Mamma wouldn't sell me anyhow
There are five Of us. and mamma
wouldn't like 10 break the set."-Buf
falo Enquirer
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26
Startling EXPOSE.

Sister Snowball-'Deed. Slstah Dahk-
leigh, did yo' all notice how Pahson
Pinfeathehs bar hald shine dis mawn-
mf Honey, tell yo' dat saint sholy
shine wifi Invalid grace.
Sister Darkleigh-lnwahd grace, nuff-
In! Pahson Pinfeatheh done been
boadin ut nah house. en- nah boy
Wash'm'ton Jetf'son done see him pol
ish dat bal haid wiz dishyer tan shoe
Observation-Disclosures American.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26

No sane man would like to live his
life over again. 1t Is astonishing how
the ordinary affairs OF life seem TO
adapt themselves to your added years.
Ones pleasures are quieter. but quite
as enjoyable 70 live in the lives Of
your children. to watch their progress.
the development Of their minds. is one
great source Of pleasure Then one has
music, reading, gardening. etc. May |
also add that ! took the advice of Az
old friend some years ago who said the
two things most likely 20 give pleasul a
in declining life were To learn whist
and to play the yioloncello?-A Man of
Sixty In Spectator.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26
A Careful Sneaker.

What did you expect TO prove by
that exceedingly long winded argument
of yoursf" asked the friend
Il didn't expect to prove anything
answered the orator. "All hoped TO
do was to confuse the other fellow so
that he couldn't prove that didn't
prove anything."-Answers.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26
RENTS COLLECTED.
MONEY LOANED.
PROPERTIES FOR SALE.

No. 80 Elm St, rooms and nttic, desirable
brick dwelling.
Nos. $40 and 251 North Main St double
frame.dwelling Very cheap
No. so York street-arge 9-story brick dwell
ing with large lot--hot water heat Terms
easy.
Nos 1919 South Franklin street Frame
dwelling houses Easy terms
No. 10 South Main street, three-story brick
dwelling rooms and cellar.
No. 81 South Main street. brick dwelling,
three stories, rooms,
No SO South Main street, : rooms, three
story brick dwelling
Cottage Hill, frame house and barn with
large lot, house has 10 rooms,
Nos. % so-as Wilson street three frame
houses, easy terms,
Franklin street.vacant lot near Swan street.
Nos 233-es5 North Union street, double
frame dwelling with large lots. Always rent
and pay good interest on investment,
Nos. 81 SO Swan street, eiS story brick
dwelling
Dec 10, 1899
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26
Winter Excursion Tickets on the Pennsyl-
Nania Railroad.

On November LIST, the Pennsylvania Railroad
Company will place on sale at its principal
ticket offices excursion tickets to all prominent
Winter resorts in New Jersey, Virginia, North
and South Carolina, Georgia, Florida, Cuba
and Central America, The tickets will be sold
at the usual low rates with the usual liberal
return limits.
The magnificent facilities of the Pennsyl-
vania Railroad with its many connections and
through train service, make this the favorite
line for Winter travel
An illustrated book, descriptive of Winter
resorts, and giving routes of travel and rates
for tickets will be furnished free after Noyem-
Dor LIST on application TO ticket agents.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26

ISop9iiEItf iJV'I ny - ID Lc"IosJ
1t was Abljah Holden who first got
the idea, and he sprung 1t on the post.
office crowd one Saturday night In the
most unexpected manner. He'd bin
keepin powerful quiet fur week or
two, like man who's left his jack
knife stickln In the barn door and is
tryin to remember the fact, and this
mnde the surprise all the greater. The
crowd was most ready TO go home
when he got up and said:
"Feller Citizens Of Jerlcho-I want
10 see this town doomed as much MS
any of you. | want to see her git up
and hump herself till Boston or Chica-
go won't be In it, but when 1t comes to
ehoosin between size and goodness I'm
fur goodness. | think It's better fur
ones soul and body to live In small,
good town than In n big. bad town.
I'm willln to go In and help push Jcri-
cho along, as said, but let's do II ON
right lines. Let's start her off on n
high moral plane and keep her so.
There's n pint, and mebbe Il mighty
strong one, In what Bijah says" re-
marked Deacon Spooner as the speak
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26

Dan Cupid, with a bow upon four
strings,
Begin a wondrous, witching little
air;
All, when such soft, Elusive music
wings,
Good sirs, beware.
But when the fair
Dorinda with four beaus upon
string)
Assuming a wondrous, witehing lit
tie air
rhis is a yet more Notwithstanding
thing,
Good sirs, take care.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26


p. m Sundays, 6.l5 a. m, 405, 6.15 p M
TRAINS FOR NEW HOPE.
Leave Philadelphia, Reading Terminal week
days, s.04, 1904 a, m, e04 4l9, 602, ii .04 p H.
| Sundays, Q "a q. M, 40, 7.le p m.
| Close connection at Jenkintown with fast ex-
press trains to and from New York, Baltimore,
Washington, the South and West.
ATLANTIC CITY DIVISION.
Leave Philadelphia, Chestnut street wharf
and South street wharf, for Atlantic City:
Weekdays-Express, 800, a. m, 400, 400, 500,
us, D. m. Accommodation 500 a. m, 5. 80 p. M
Sundays-Express, 800, 1000 a. m. Accommo-
dation 500 a. m, 500 p. m.
Leave Atlantic City t-Weekdays-Ex-
press, ?.S5, 800, 10lo a. M, $50, $50, p. m Ac
eommodation sos a. m, 4.0o p. m sundays
/, Express-4.S0, 80, p. m. Accommodation 7i5
a m, 4.0o p. m.
Parlor Cars on all Express Trains.
FoR CAFE acknowledgements a. m, AIS,
500 p. m. Sundays--9,l5 a. m.
| FoR OCEAN CIrY-Weekdays-9.i5a a. M, 4i5
p m. Sundays-el5 a. m.
For SEA ISLE CITY-Weekdays-9.l5 a. m,
| 500 p. m.
New York Liberty Streetl $40 p. NJ. Leaves
Atlantic City, $50 a. m.
! Detailed time tables at ticket Offices
For further information, apply to nearest
Philadelphia x Reading Railway ticket agent
or address,
W. q. BESLER, EDISON ]. WEEKS,
Reading Terminal, Philadelphia
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26
A SPASM OF REFORM
THE REVIVAL THAT WAS SUGGESTED
FOR THE TOWN OF JERICHO.

Pap Perkins, the Postmaster, Tells
About the Enthusiasm with Which
Abiiah HoIden's Idea Was Greeted
and How Lish Billings Doused 1t
Win Il Wet Iinnkef.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26
{: M {: R S @ N
PIANOS.

For nearly ffty years these in
struments have stood the test. They
have been used in schools, conser-
vatories, in the home, and ON the
stage. You will hear their praises
sounded by professionals as we'll as
amateurs. Our 10000 satisfied
purchasers stand ready to say to
friends who are looking for a
new Piano, "Buy an Emerson. As
dealers, who know all makes, their
good and bad points, we say there
is more Piano for less money in this
make than in any other on the
market. The Emerson is leader
because merit is bound 10 win.
TERMS EASY: a little down and
a little each month until paid.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-12-26
ilIadelphia &
Reading Railway
Engines Burn Hard Coal-No Smoke
TINE TABLE, IN EXPECT OCT. 2, 1900.
TRAINS LEAVE NEW HOPE.

For Glenside, Jenkintown and Philadelphia,
weekdays, $40, 7.16, 1000 a m, l245, $50, sos
p m. SUNDAYS, 6 Is a. m, 405, 6l5 p. m.
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19

FAR-FETCHED PRECEDENTs

Tho expansionists and the imperiallsts
are shlfty fellows. They can iump from
explanation to explanation. from defense
to defense with exceeding adroltness, hut
they are on tho defensive at last ma all
the time. The very novelty OF their
position forces them 20 become Apologies
When the mere fact of territorial ex-
panson was first under discussion the ad-
vocates OF the new policy attempted 10
draw a parallel between the natural
growth OF the Union over contiguous ter
ritory and by the overnows of our popula-
ton. and the conquest OF islands over
sea that all are ready to admit AFFORD
no room for American homeseekers and
present no possibilities OF future state-
hood Of a homogeneous character with
that OF the existing States. The COM
PARSONS in this stage Of the argument
were too far fetched to deceive anybody.
The most unlearned can appreciate the
dinerenas between natural expansion and
unnecessary conquest. between benevolent
assimilation and criminal aggression.
Now our imperialists are going step
further aud are seeking to 1nd warrant
In our history for imperialism itself--the
foroible subsection and government with
out representation OF one people by an
other. The Washington Star of late
date has this very remarkable argument
In support of present administration poll
4 cies:
Inc South was coerced but only after Q
protracted and most heroic resistance She
tuition, and lost She then accepted the re.
\ sui Oh the appeal TO force. and pledged her
sen 10 the SUPPORT OF the new order But
ailnousn coereed. she found herself stili with
/ ahd enjoy. We are asserting as a Nation
the same authority in the Philippines thai
l we asserted In the South. II 1t worked nc
tllury 70 the South after the war was over
put was employed SO as TO bring that sec,
ton speedily back into Its old place In tn,
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19
A Henlth Record breaker.

New Orleans Times Democrat
The deaths In New Orleans reached last
week the lowest figure known here. There
death rate per 1000 per annum l3,l2 for
the whites and l4.39 for the entire popula-
ton. white and black. The total includes
FIVE deaths by accident or suicide, leaving
the mortality from disease only 1876 per
thousand for the whites, which would give
an average duration of life OF "a years
that is, IL this low rate of mortality could
be kept up in New Orleans for a lena
period OF time the average white person
here would reach the august age OF 81.
1t Is to be remembered that the figures
for New Orleans are not based on Inflated
estimates OF population. The census has
just shown that Cincinnati Inflated us
population so, 900, and that Its dea. h rate
was based on these exaggerated figures.
with the result of making the city APP
pear far healthier than 1t really Is. CHI
oago Is also found to have inflated S
population $50, 900. With such swoi en-
figures it is easily possible TO make a
good sanitary record, for the deaths that
would seem small total for city o..
100000 are large for one OF 100000. On
/ the other hand, the death rate In New Or
leans is based ON very nearly the same
population as the list census gave the
city. Our hoard OF health INDUCES In no
wild guesses or innation, and the estimate
will certainly not be 10000 out of the way
/ from the actual total returned indeed,
such hints as have come out in REGARD to
the census indicate that the estimated
population upon which the board Of health
has based It's fgures Is below instead of
above It's actual population
But to return 70 the report. II shows,
what has frequently been shown be ore,
that the summer is the healthiest season
in New Orleans, It's death rate falling to
half what II Is during the worst pa OF
the winter Taking last week as a sam
pie when two-th!rds OF the country was
suffering from one of the worst hot waves
ever known, while persons we're ding by
the hundreds In Chicago New York and
other Northern and Western cities from
sunstroke and other heat diseases there
was not single death from any heat
malady In New Orleans; indeed cholera
infantum. the scourge OF New York during
hot weather and far more murderous TO
the children than King Heroi himself,
claimed but two victims In New Orleans
for the whole week.
We would say further that for a mum
Der OF weeks previous the returns have
been nearly equally satisfactory, hut not
quite as good as for last week, which W.
call attention to because 1t is record
breaker
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19
nY CHARLES A. TowNE. }

In my opinion the democratic party, or,
II you will the three allied parties OF pro-
gressiye politics, never enjoyed SO prom
islng chance OF victory as this year.
They are united in pushing one common
paramount issue. from the discussion OF
which their opponents recoil, The ques-
ton of miltarism and Imperialism is one
which appeals to every American-to the
parents who can discern a way in which
may be settled the possibility of their son
being forced into compulsory military ser
vice. as are the youth Of France and Ger
many t9day; to the taxpayer who knows
that the enormous ornaments ~ military
nations place crushing burdens upon the
shoulders OF those who must defray the
expenses. To the laboring man who we'll
appreciates the saying that In Germany
every man who goes to work carries a
soldier en- his back" to the humanitarian
who can not believe thai trade, even II so
obtiinable. should be bOugAt with blood
TO the Christian who will join Mr.. Bryan
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19
BRYAN WILL BE VICTORIOUS.

in saying that "the gospel of Christ had
no Calling gun attachment"
~
The strength Of the argument is ours.
This year, too. we have hearty harmony In
all three organizations.
You can not pick UP a newspaper with
out noting the return to the old demo-
cratic standards of men who deserted them
in 1896 Mr.. Bryan is losing no followers,
buL is gaining them daily
do not underestimate the astuteness
as practical politicians of the leaders to
whom we are opposed. They have that
sort of political cunning which has been
manifested in their efforts to hold spur
ious anti-impe liarilstNconference at dndl-
annapolis on the day before the regular lib
erty conference-although II was called
long afterward-in order that the two
might be confused and that the action OF
the great conference might be ignored by
such of the partisan press rs would find
profit in exploiting the position taken by
the lesser and counterfeit one.
Nor do underestimate the enormous
power of the money which Hanna and his
associates are now wringing from every
protected monopoly and every applicant
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19
A NOTEWORTHY SPECTACLE


For short while Friday last every
wheel and stroke of commerce throughout
the great Southern Pacific system Of rail-
ways and steamship lines was stopped .
out OF respect to the memory Of the man
who had been so largely instrumental in
originally putting them IN motion.
This was an appropriate way of recog-
nizing the removal OF the guiding hand.
II was an object lesson OF the mighty en-
ergies which that hand welded. But
In few minutes the vast machinery was
In operation again--a fitting demonstra.
ton. also. OF the fact that no one hand
Is absolutely necessary to keep the pow
erfnl agencies Of commerce or civilixa
ton in active play.
The utility Of the modern corporation
Is strikingly displayed in this lncident. i
used to be true that great enterprise
stopped when their promoters passe,
away. In the days when the individual
was the important factor in commerc
and material development. the death OF
successful man meant more than now
Corporations move on after the m<nbef,
have gone. The business Of the world ha,
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19

Tammany Times.
It is nearly four years elnce an out
and out American sat in the presidential
chair of the United States.
During ell this hiatus in real rcpub-
ilcan government we have seen tho STAN
dard OF American citizenship reduced from
proudest heights to it's present und served
and pitiabie level.
We have seen the American peoplef
chosen representative so far forget lis
country's independence as TO become sn
Anglomanlac and imitator of decaying
potentates OF other lands.
We have seen him aiding and ebettlng
every onslaught made on liberty by the
kings and emperors OF Europe.
We have seen him their 1lv the'r
friend aud counsellor in tle very hour
wnen he and they were sac.iaui1g reOpie
fighting for their freedom srom thL RUE
OF kings.
We have beheld The fruits Of hat al
lance in the overpowing OF heroic Lien
who dared to strike for Liberty.
With sorrow we have seen the triumph
of might over right. OF the allied wealth
powers against the struggling and lelpie1
ooot.
And, while we have looked on, our re-
quests for mercy to the suolugatid, cur
protests against that ubiagation, have
been derided or unheeded By the puned :
up autocratic powers. including the cliet
magistrate OF these once ice United
States.
J This contrast to the action OF : etrulne
American who said % England Halt on
your inroad upon the liberties of SIS or
state upon this continent" is sur
prise to all who hoped so much fiom
republican performance.
Truly, the Jacksonian democrat is missed
In these degenerate DAYS, and IN his place
the un-American and ur-republican
eeems sadly oni of place IN The ligh Office
he administers, albeit he's al ally" Of
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19
WANTED-AN AMERICAN PRESIDENT.

The European powers that bully little
states
The time has come, indeed when true
Americans begin to ask If the United
states are not to know tas wholeaome
days again when free America had an
American for president who dared 10
stand for freedom for ell sister states
before the world.
With an American for president what
would have been the answer 20 the patri-
otto Beers?
1t would ave beol a protest Ioag and
loud against the aggression which now
rots them of their liberty aud which
effaces boundaries and name from off the
list Of the free states and every atlas
N the world.
Kings may smile, but such a protest
would have made the p.llagars o. Europe
hesitate at sacrificing fellow Christians
for the purposes of empire. lGsf OF land
and gold, and arbitrary rule of kings.
That example would nave ltl TO others
and have stayed the hand Of corque5. md
of power now eagerly advancei in every
corner where a helpless enemy has made
his hnbitatlon and his home.
In our own case, At would have taught
us to respect the rights of Porto K'cGns,
Cuhans, Filipinos and the osheis-nevrr
enemies OF ours-lately left to cur good
Offices and tender, freeIon-lov'ng ncIcits.
~
With an American for president the
democratic spirit lear 10 every patriot
heart would have sprung to life at any
call for holp-of which the Fi!ipincs and
the Beers are far more worthy to lie hoard
than was the cry of Cu9a IL her Gdrkest
hour.
With az Auericar 'or president, we
would not wait on Engllnds VIII, CT ask
the privilege Of building al American
canal across the Isthmus, OF ask permits
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19

ceased to be disturbed by the demise OF
master builders or executive chiefs. So
ciety has created bulwark Of CONNER
cal safety for itself In organising great
enterprises upon corporate basis.
These cooperative agencies are necessi-
ties OF the times and the death OF man
like Huntington emphasizes their utility.
but they have within Themselves and with
in their possibilities elements of great
danger to the public as wen as of adj
vantage. They need to be hedged about
by the proper legislative restrictions. A
limit to their operations needs to be axed.
The principle OF combination. useful In
ITSELF must not be abused or perverted.
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1900-08-19
A FEW WORDS ABOUT WAR.

hour who does not believe war a curse
infinitely more easy 20 grapple with and
eXtirpate than that Of poverty among the
massesr
Frederick the Great said that an army
was like snake and moved upon l 3
belly. His comparison. though witty, was
unjust 10 the snake, for he Is much
cleaner being than an army. When he
passes from pace to place he does not
trail filth after him. aud when his fangs
eject poison their destructive energy -
slight indeed compared with she frightful
threat OF disease either imminent or ac-
tive. which follows all armed forces.
Kings and rulers are, of course. largely
blamabIe that war should still survive.
But they after all, are merely tools of
the peoples will. This hideous, persistent
evil can not be explained by Bismarck,
& German emperor. house OF commons
or ii president OF the United States. Per-
sonaIities and councils like these are but
iDcarnate expressions of the popular will.
They know it, and watch the fluctuations
Of public opinion rs eagerly as a Wall
street gambler watches those of his office
ticker. The days OF divine right" are
no more. Even the Russian despot ives
in hourly dread of assassination, and the
sultan OF Turkey feels less safe in his
lordly palace than a rabbit in it's hutch.
Concerning slavery. Imprisonment Tor
debt, trial by jury and every important
persecution which has afflicted mankind
for centuries. all the progressive nations
OF the world have reached one am cal
conviction. Why, then, do they stu
delay the abolition of an lniquity like
war? Are not the people wholly at fault?
individually hosts OF them see, as rellg-
ionists. their hypocrisy. and, as moral
lists, their defiance of a sacred ethical law
But when massed together the eduea cd
and the Ignorant are in hldeous har-
mOny.
The relief of Ladysmith turned London
into one howl Of jubIation for a day
and night. The relief OF Mafeking
wrought an effort still more turbid. Both
occasions were an excuse for the most
lioidinous drunkenness. Thousands of
those who roared ana caroused could not
have written three lines of decently
spelled prose; many of them could neither
have written nor read. Yet the educated
looked on and enjoyed the mad satur-
MALTA and tod one another that 1t was all
a proof OF imperial greatness.
~