The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1900-08-19
MR. DooLEY ON
Ooiees FROM
N5e Comb.


Il don't think" said Mr. Dooley. THAT
me frind Willum Jennings Bryan is as
good an orator as he was four years
ago"
Hes tn grandest talker that's lived
since DanI o'Conne1l." said Mr. Hen
messy.
'Ye've heard thin all an We know,
said Mr.. Dooley But 1 tell We, he's
gone back Dye mind tn time we .wiut
down to tn COLISEUM an he come our
In a black alpaca coat an pushed into
III air tn finest wurruds ye' liver heard
spoke in all ye'er BORN days? Twas a
balloon ASCENSION an tn las days "
Pompey an blast on tn canal all In
wan. I had to hold on to me chair to
Keep firm goin' up in tn air. an mind
that If 1t hadn't been FIR a crack on tn
head We got firm diflygate from West
consin ye'd We been In tn chair iy'
Gin'ral Bragg. Dear me. viii we iver
f'rget 1t, tn way he pumped it into tn
pluthocrats? I tell we here an now he
says, 'they'se as good business men in tn
quiet country graveyards iv Kansas as
ye can find in tn palathiaI lunch conn
theirs iv Wall sthreet he says 'Whin
~ III AdSC ~ liltl IldI WHO AOOhS lAlAS u
two-dollar pitcher Nv Naypolyeon at Saint
Helena ne says, I say to mesilf, We
shall not-ye shall not'-what tn divvle is
it ye shall not do, HinnisSy?
Eye shall not cruelty mankind upon a
crown Nv thorns, said Mr.. Hennessy.
Right We ARE. 1 forgot Mr. Dooley
went on. well, thin were his own wur-
ruds. He was young an he wanted
somethin an he spoke up. He'd been
rayporther on IL newspaper an he'd
rather be prisdint thin write amy longer
FIR tn paper, an he made tn whole Nv
tn piece out iv his own head.
But nowadays he has tin wurruds fr
Thomas Jefferson an tn rest Nv tn sage
crop to wan FIR himsllf. Fellow Dimmy-
Gratis, he says. before goin' amy farther,
an maybe farm worse. l reluctantly ac-
cipt tn nommynation FIR prisidint that
have caused We to offer me, he says, AN
good luck to me, he says. Seem tn
country in tn condition 1t is he says
l cannot rayfuse, he says. I will now
lave subjict that must be dlsagreeable
to nanny iy ye an speak a few wurruds
firm tn fathers iv tn party, iv whom
there ARE NANNY he says, though no
shame to tn party FIR all iv that ne
says. Thomas Jefferson, tn sage w Mon
ttcello, says: "Ye can't make silk purse
out Nv sow'S ear" a remark that will at
wanst recall tn sayin' Nv Binjamin
Franklin, tn sage iv Camden, that 9TH
farthest way ar-round is tn shortest
way acrost." Nawthin cud be thruer
thin that onlis it is tn ipygram iv An
dhrew Jackson, tn sage Nv Syracuse,
that "a bur-rd in hand Is worth two
in tn BUSH" What gran wurruds thin
ARE, an how they must torture tn pris-
int leaders IL tn Raypublican party.
Sam1 Adams, tn sage ov Salem says:
Laugh an the wurruld laughs with ye,"
while Pathrick Hinnery, tn sage iv Jar
sey City, puts 1t that Eye shud always bet
aces befure tn dhraw." Turnff further
back into histhry we find that Brian
Boru, tn sage iv Munsther, said: "Cead
mile failthe,' an Joolyus Caesar, tn
sage Nv Waukesha, says, "Whin ye're in
Rome. do tn Romans" Nebuchadneezer
there's a name FIR ye-th' sage IL I-din-
naw-where. says, eye can't ate yer hay
an have it, Solomon, tn sage iv Sage
Vile, said. ''Whin a mans marrid his
throubles begins" an Adam, tn sage iv-
Eden, put it that "A snake in tn grass
is worth two in tn boots" Yell see be
this, me good an thrue frinds, that tn
voices firm tn tombs is united in wan
gran chorus FIR tn hon'rable ticket We
have nommynated. 1 will say no more.