The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-03-18
THAT REPUBLICAN PLATFop, !,
10 the Editor OF &c Herald:

To the Editor Of The Herald:
The Utah Republican platform rer,,-,.
me Of a funeral sermon. The Rev. Ms
cellus Glencoe. a recent graduate Of a.
divinity school, had been called 10 -
pulpit of the leading church in the -
porous but rather oid-faShiOned viitIis-99-
OF Smlthheld, a typical New Engss9
Town. he acquired quite a reputation for
elegant diction and elOquence. 'E
Everything seemed TO be going ,-
SWEmmingly. Both the pastor ana ~.
newly Unmarried wife were highly please
with Iaeir prospects. But just then 10
Seph Stubs, the oldest shOemaker of r5s
YHiage, Familiarity known as '-old I-r.,s
Joe. died at the advanced age Of 81 a.
/ had been from his earliest manhood y
member or the church and a regular a.
tendant upon its services for more tbsD
sixty years. He was a good shOemaks~
DuJ nau led one or the most pr0ssi.'
humdrunn, colorless lives possible. q liza
almost utterly devoid OF incident Ma
good minister thought TO make q fsv-
Dflef remarks at the funeral, but u.o1
calling upon the daughters OF The DE-
ceased, two elderly spinlSters, he found
LA lhey expected the regulation H.
neral sermon Of three-quarters OF #1
hour. Puzzled TO know how he could f'i
up the time with such a barren sub5sr-
he questioned and crOss-eXamined Ia
tneir father ; career. About all he could
CLEAN from them was, Our father We
So very old, and was born so long sE0
Why, he was born in 1875"
In despair he discussed the matter VII,
his better half. She could suggest ro-S-
l-ls except thaI IL would never do 10 ar
Iend Aunt Nabby and Aunt Patty I-
sighting their fathers memory on.
good pastor studied all the evening. bur in
vain. He retired early, hopeless. he
tossed about sIeepiessly until the cl1.L
toIIed the midnight hour. Then a br.sr-
idea suddenly struck him. Exclain.~a
NrrsE.t Ia h., ID
| tied on his clothes and hurried 10 -fs
study, pulled down his chrOnoi9gs.si
tables and encyclopedias and Went IN
WORK, and by O'Clock he had a if-r-
minute sermon written. Beginning win "A
Few brdef sentences commentator of la
humble virtues Of the deceased, he thsn
said:
But our venerable friend was born ID,
me year $50, memorable year in thu
annals OF the world as well of our be-
loved country. In this year Napoleon Ina
Great met his final overthrow at Water
100. He described the great battlel5alF
ana pattle. quoting literally from Victor
hugo graphic description (Of course
using the proper quotation marks. Ia
lnen gave BRIEF and spirited Dissertation
OF the eonqueror,s achievements. Tl-T
ne sald N 1913 Wordsworth, the founder
OF new ScnOOl in English poetry. We
nercely attacked in the Edinburgh Review,
Dy JeHerys. In 1915 appeared SCOTS
Lord of the Isles, Guy Manneri-e-T
anu several oJner OF his novels, and in our
country JacksOn'S brilliant victory a.
New Orleans closed our war with Cyra9+
Britain With these and other iIlus-~s-
tons OF like character he heightened an,
ms ms DISCOURSE and ended by saying
Thus, you see my dear friends. that ogr
departed brother was born in one OF ia
most memorable years of the century
The congregation congratulated him On
MS prlhlanJ sermon, and the daughters
thanked him heartily. saving thai me
had never thought before what Z. rem9-l--
able man their father had been. On
reaching his home he asked the Darrr4-
mon was quite a success?' She -raD1ia.5.
%, yes, but what did it have to do Win
old Mr. Stubbs?" And he replied: 'F6-
heavens sake, Clara, don't spoil the good
eHect IN TINS community by asking such
foolish questions
VICTOR