The Savannah morning news., 1900-08-04

l ran away from them l was afraid OF
more questions. Could you, sir retain
your right mind If you were suddenly ask
ed by an imp of years
" If cheese comes after meat, what
comes after cheese?
''Of course. since ! see that you are
city man, you know that mouse comes
after cheese, but | didn't. l protested
that 1 did not know and could not guess,
but the question haunted me day and
night until l satisfied the class that
wanted the answer from 1t. And then
their ridiculous laughter. AS soon as they
were over laughing a boy who once lived
in Beloit asked me:
Why is a fool like a needle?'
"'Why?' l asked eager TO be over with
IT,
Because he has an eve. but no head
Personal application of that joke was
made TO me al once"
Il am patient" continued the school
master. shying stone at his satehel,
which 81 God by the roadway, but such
idiotic questions from children was try
ing to educate drove me nearly wild. Life
in the country is rot very bright for
most of the people. / have often thought
that was their own fault, for there Is
wealth of natural and other history about
them. wholly ignored. The people of the
country live too near the soil and too
far away from the sky. For instance. sir,
why should a catfish at ain the enormous
size that it does In this insignificant
stream in ancient times, or is it a decay
ing branch of the once powerful stream
that poured from Lake Michigan west
ward and southwark to the Gulf of Mex
leo? Pardon me- though, for giving you
conundrums when / have just been COM
planning of them. You probably know that
in and about 1882 Abraham Lincoln was
frequently in the vicinity of this stream
ami crosred 1t several times You also are
probably aware that jefferson Davis once
camped upon its banks, but was wise
enough not TO attempt 10 battle in it. Gen.
Zachary Taylor made a valiant effort to
reach its waters at one time, but small
pox held hack his troops. Here, sir Rlack
Hawk laughed above the dirty flow while
Stillman fed from him and his thirty
warriors. Yet not one of the community
that has been born by This stream. lived,
loved and died in sight of it, knows aught
of these facts. Facts sir, not miserable
conundrums like, fer instance:
why does a sailor know there is
man in the moon?"
He shook his head and went en-, while
| busie d myself in taking the dust from
the enamel of my wheel.
People in the country wish their chill
dren educated, but do not know what the
sernble the ambitious people of the city's
sLms. They start the child on lis educa-
tional way in this fashion:
The year contains twelve months. OF
these you will have four in the fields,
three at the woodpile and in the barn and
five in school. For vacation you may go
10 the circus If it comes and the price
Of butter keeps up
THAT the child shall learn anything but
tn
the head of no one but the teaoher-if the
teacher is ambitious l have been ambi-
tious l am so no longer l would rather
be a sewing machine agent than teach
in the average country district. There
may be enjoyable districts in the moon or
Kemschatka, but not here. Think of be-
ing chased through an entire term by the
question:
when is a man thinner than a lath?'
81 automatically avoided getting an an
swer to that question until yesterday.
Then 1 asked the eldest girl under my
care. She pulled at her calico gown,
showed her not too attractive teeth, and
answered:
" Please, sir, when he's shaving
Think OF such rot permeating the
minds of children. Not word about al
zebra, higher arithmetic the sciences
only questions, questions, from morning
self into this stream
/ would have sympathized with him, but
he waved me to one side.
II can see poetry In the dark waters be-
meath me, joyous life is all about me, but
what is an ambitious soul to do before
the question from a tow-headed urchin,
son of a thrifty farmer who pipes up:
a." When is a fellows eye like barrel?'
You think of bungs, hoops, slaves and
the like. but you never get the answer
until you have appealed to the small boy
that gave the question. / am going to
the city"
Over the hill and far away in the forest
could be heard the voices of children They
were running and coming toward Sugar
river bridge. The schoolmaster looked de-
spairingly at me, and / withdrew to where
1 would not be observed At the brow of
the hill the children saw the form of their
preceptor and shouted again They
swarmed down upon him and pressed
red album in his hands. When he had
clasped the hands of all the troop and they
were about to leave him, heard one mid
get mischievously ask--the final shot-the
end of school-the thing always to be re-
membered:
please, teacher, why is life the riddle
of riddles?'
Said he with a sad gesture of his hands:
II give it up"
Ha," screamed all, that's why. Every
body does"