The Saint Paul globe., 1900-06-23
Short Story OF
fbe Day = siE4. sES40
The King.

talking. So Capt. Bill and his brother
Jack sat cOntentedly on the shaded bench
lr the captains garden, overlooking ten
miles of sea, from Sheppey cliffs to South
end. They smoked two pipes apiece over
the situation in China, and two more over
the decay of the mercantile marine. Dur
ing the fifth pipe after tea, the ancient
female who did for the captain shuf-
fled by with a grunt and toiled slowly
across the fields to her home in the viii
lage of Minister. The captain follow ed
her retreating figure with a shake of his
head
GIFTS more contrary every day, she do, -
he remarked feelingly. ''Wus an wus!"
'Wot you want" said Brother Jack,
rs a wife"
The captain relit his pipe. and looked
Cling between sky and sea-
Lady of Lorne five minutes late" he
observed. casually.
I s'pose now" inquired Jack. persist
emily. you've some one in your aye?"
I won't say" admitted Bill, 'But !
might ave"
Keeps a baccy shop?''
You don't mean to say as people as
been talkin'!"
''Talkin'!' retorted his brother. wen
you gives me couple O pound O. baccy.
talkin' 2"
The captain sighed as one confronted
with an insOluble problem
You goes in" continued Jack, wagging
the stem of his long clay pipe in admo-
milton, in the mornin'. an as 'alf an
ounce. The captain nodded. AN in the
afternoon an as another" The captain
groWled assent. An in the evenin' an
as one more"
fynrO1 I,yD i
Ihat ere big chest wot come off the
saucy Jane is most full already You'll
ave to set up a shop yourself soon If
you don't stop it,
The captain reflled his pipe slowly.
Ow am l goin' to stop it? That's the
pint" Jack smiled the superior smile OF
twice married wisdom
Harsk 'er wen She'll ave the chest
moved up to the shop?"
IS pose she WOn't?"
Then she won't. There's Others"
"s'pose," asked the captain. as one who
puts an abstract argument, 'as 1 was set
on 'er?'
More reason to settle 1t"
'Ay; but not all at onst," said the can
tain, artfully. I've bin leadin' up to it.
'Ow long?"
"a matter O. two year" Jack laughed
scornfuly.
Some men," he stated, would ave
married a dozen gals in two year"
Ay," said the captain, enviously, "des-
say they would. P'raps 1 might give 'e1
a Int, If 1 knowed 'ow."
wy don't you send 'er somethink OH
OF the gardin? A few f1owers"-
Amt got none; only vegetables"
We'll" said Jack, vegetables is-nour-
ishin'."
"Ay, with BIT O. pork. If 'ad a pig
now P'7
but you amt"
No" He sighed. That's where IT Is d"
Ihey smoked another couple of pipes in ST.
lence.
well, mate" said Jack "I must he
goin'. So long"
80 long, Jack"
Bill watched his brother till he had gone
over the hill. Then he walked indoors
with an air Of resolution. ''Marrers an
peas" he muttered, 1T shall be"
Then he brushed himself carefully. and
set out with jaunty air to the village,
where the widow Riley kept smart Iit-
tie shop in which tobacco, sweetstuffs
and penny novelties predominated. After
lew remarks upon the weather. he in
vested IN his usual half ounce, and re-
paired to the Waterloo for his usual
whole pint Then he returned for an
other half ounce
Just for the nornin'," he explained.
Lor, captain, you don't love nOthink
like your smOke!" said the widow. arch
~ She was a nice looking, round
raced widow, and she had very pleas
ant smile.
Don't you think that. Mrs. Riley. "
said the captain, with sudden boldness.
IF I was to tell you wot I liked best
you'd never believe me-"
on, go on, captaini" said the vyfdOry
with laugh. But the captains courage
fled and took him with it,
Might most think" he muttered with
awesome delight. "as she knowed wot
was in my mind to say!"
Next morning, when the ancient Mrs.
Grummidge had gone down to the coast
guards houses for gossip, the captain
cut couple of vegetable marrows and
picked few pecks of peas. He added a
gallon Of potatoes, and packed them
carefully in big basket Then ne hailed
daft Tommy, who was busy frightening,
the crows from Farmer Jackson's field.
Hi. Tom, my mani he called. Like
to earn a pint:'
''Yus." said Tom, grinning.
Then take this ere to Mrs. Riley at
the shop, with my compliments, d'you
see." Tom looked doubtful
Who'll scare the birds?" he asked.
"Oh--er-I will" said the captain
Look sharp"
''Yus." Tom gazed lovingly at the veg
etables. ''Wot be they worth?" he in
qutred, touching the marrOws.
"a matter O. ntnepence," said the cap
tain, boldly.
'And t'others?"
'The peas be better'n they're sellin' at
sixpence in the town." stated the cap
tain, proudly, AN taters, too"
Lori" said crazy Tom: and off he
ran, leaving the captain waving his red
handkerchief wildly at the marauding
crows.
Tom was a long time gone, and the
captain found the scarecrowing rather
warm work. He had an uncomfortab bic
feeling that the occasional passers-by
were laughing at him. and Mrs Grum-
midge told him frankly that he was
"hacting like a born hijiotr He had
muttered several nautical prayers to
himself before Tom returned with an
empty basket.
You amt let none on 'em settler" he
asked. anxiously. Tom was an artist in
his profession.
mo, no! What did she say?''
Too dear" said Tom, briefly. AN
so they all said; but
What roared the captain.
'"Too dear. Did best OF could for ZEE.
Two and thruppence the lot; an spent
my tuppence; an 'ere's the rest The
captain grabbed the handful OF coppers
and rushed into his dwelling like a
whirlWtnd.
"Cap'n be crazier than Oi?' said Tom
with d chuckle. "An' if e knowed OF
got two-an six. and kept rest! Ho, ho
ho!"
That afternoon the captain bought
four half ounces before he completed his
explanation to the widow. She was so
good teInDared about Ii that ha felt he