davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04
Something He Couldn,t Wear.

A wealthy American who became q
convert to Rome was very generous to-
Pope Leo XIII in money matters He
had done many generous things, and
the pope HAD rewarded him with or
ders and medals galore. For once
year this convert made pilgrimage to
Rome, where he was kindly received
by the holy father as son and gener-
ally. until the orders were exhausted.
each time was bestowed with some
fresh honor On such occasions all
these brave metal pieces were attached
to the rich Americans breast
"I'll soon end that" the pope remark
ed to contidante who was at his side
during the levee. Next time shall
give him a snuffbox," which he did.
and beautiful jeweled box it was.
The following year the American
turned up again and was granted ali
audience, when to the holy fathers
CONSERVATION the faithful son Of the
church appeared not only with all his
medals, but with the snuffbox attached
to his waistcoat.
"The next time" the pope said. with
a comicai SIGH. 81 shall present him
with a marble topped table. 1t is the
only thing can think of that he can't
tie to his waistcoat." Chicago Times
Herald.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04
Mighty had Luck

The colored gentleman who collects
paper scraps has disabled fright. :"
Only the thumb is of much service.
Asked how it happened he looked sad
and replied, dat ar wuz piece Of
bad luck. boss; yes, sab, mighty bad
luck"
How was that?"
"Ah doan' like tub tell, but 'twuz
mighty bad luck"
Finally he consented to explains:
1.-TWO felluhs insulted me in place
across the street heah, an All stahted
in tub FRAGILE dem out. De second
felluh All tackled wuz stan'in tween
me an an iron pilluh dat suppohted de
roof. JUS as All wuz erbout tub hand
him smash on de nose dat niggah
stepped one side an nah hand struck
de pilluh instead. Hit done broke ebry
one of nah finguhs, an dey'ye been
stiff eber since. Yes, sab, dat wuz sub
tinly bad luck"
"But what about the first fellow
you went up against? You didn't say
what became of him."
'Oh, dat felluh? Yah, yah! Boss.
All kin show you dat niggah any time.
'E work JUS a block from heah. e
Hin't got no nose an only lilly piece one
ear
How'd he lose 'em?''
How'd e lose 'em? Boss, 'e didn't
lose 'em. Dey wuz took from i'm, an
Abs de man what done hit. All done
bit 'em bofe off. Yes, sab, All bit 'em
off while we'se rollin round on de TO-"
Detroit News.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04
ear
How'd he lose 'em 2"
A Football Incident In New York

Mr.. Frank w. Graves during his
newspaper career witnessed many sin
gular scenes, but the oldest one hap
pened, according to Mr.. Graves, in the
old days when the big college football
teams played their star games on the
New York polo grounds on Thanksgiv-
ing day.
On the occasion mentioned Yale and
Princeton had played and Yale had
won.
Going up Broadway there walked a
dapper young Princeton man and a
girl. Going down Broadway at the
same moment were eight victorious
young Yale men. They were happy,
but silent. and they came straight
down the street until they spied the
Princeton pair.
Then still In silence, moved by sin
gle purpose, the Yale. men formed a
circle. and as the other pedestrians
made way for them they went around
and around the Princeton pair. At first
the young man was surprised. then an
gered. and at last he raised his cane
and made dash for liberty, whereup-
on the Yale men stopped and, without
a word, fell upon him as they do in
football. quietly. heavily and quickly.
Then, Strengthening themselves again
into line, the eight Yalesians stopped
moment and in concert raised their
hats to the thoroughly frightened girl
and silently resumed their march down
the street.-Saturday Evening Post.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04
Her Last Drink.

In Hyde Park lives a young matrOn
who is of such high nervous tempera-
ment that if she drinks the very small
fore going to bed the result is sleepless
ness for the remainder Of the night.
Some nights ago number of friends
dropped in for the evening, and the
husband, who, by the way, Is south
erner. suggested that he make mint
julep for each of the company. The
suggestion was received with delight.
and the juleps We're promptly mixed
In his wife's glass, however, he put
only enough whisky to flavor the
water, probably not more than tea
spoonful. OF this she slipped about
half. The result, however. was the
same. She was troubled with insomnia
all night long, and it was not until 5
o'clock in the morning that she drop
ped off to sleep and, as a conse-
quence, was not called for breakfast
At 10 O'clock she came down stairs
and hearing the voices Of children on
the front porch stopped to listen. Her
heart filled with motherly pride as she
heard her elder son, a boy of 6. telling
seven or eight children from the neigh
borhood that they must not make too
much noise as his mamma was asleep.
Imagine her horror, too, as the young
hopeful added:
"She drank so much whisky last
night that she couldn't come down to
breakfast tbs morning. Kansas City
Star 81
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04
$3.50 Version. Of Jack and ,Jil1

An English clergyman has written
the history of Jack and Jill on a new
and original plan. The first four pages
of the book are numbered l, the next
four 2. and SO on up to page 8. The
stories are so arranged that any page
marked can be read after any num-
bered l, making good sense. In the
same way page 3 can be read after
page or page 2; page will follow
page l, 2 OIL B, and so on through the
eight. Application of the laws Of per-
mutation shows that the book thus
contains 65,536 stories of Jack and Jill.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04
Not nn Old Acquain tance.

do you mean to say that the horse
ran away with you?" said Mr., Meek
ton, aghast.
"Yes," answered his wife.
and wouldn't stop when you told
him to-"
"Of course he wouldn't
"Well, Henriette, don't know what
to say except that the horse wasn't ac-
quainted with you or else he wouldn't
have dared to act in that manner
Washington Star.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04

A conscientious person should be-
ware of getting into passion. for ev-
cry sharp Word one speaks lodges in
ones own heart. and such slivers hurt
us worse than any one else.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04
A Sermon In Brief

A man met bull in field. "I'll toss
You to see who stays" said the bull.
He tossed, and the man lost. The NOR
al Is that 1t is never safe to indulge in
games of chance. especially when all
the odds are against you.-Philadel-
phia North American.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04
A Feminine Trait.

Mrs. Hoon-They say that Mrs.
Swiftsmith is greatly troubled with in
somnia
Mr.. Hoon-Yes. understand that
she discovered the fact. a week or so
ago. that her husband talks in his
sleep. and she hasn't slept wink since
for fear of missing something. -Har
per's Bazaar.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04

The man who tells you all he knows
isn't half so bad as the man who tries
to tell you all he thinks he knows
Someryille Journal.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04

The ports of New South Wales are
the freest on the globe, and in none Of
the Australian colonies are there any
discriminating or differential duties.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04

Muffs were first used by doctors to
keep their fingers soft and were adopt
ed by ladies about 1850.
The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1900-09-04

the huts till breakfast timer" Then
turning to another: "Mr. Williams. you
might take three men and erect four bed
places in each hut. Mr.. Christianson
and the remainder of you gentlemen, if
you will accompany me, we will make
careful house to house inspection of
the village"
Having dispatched the others to their
various employments, set off, accom-
panied by Allie, to begin the CHASTITY
work of inspection. 1t must not be sup
posed that | in any way induced her to
run the risk. To tell the truth, I pro-
tested vigorously against it, but with
out result. Her heart was set upon it,
and she would not be deferred.
The first house we visited was a small
one, built Of adobe mixture and inhab-
tied by three people, two Of whom were
down with the disease. There had orig
inally been six in the family, but three
had persisted. made my examination,
noted their cases in my pocketbook,
spoke some cheering words to them and
passed on to the next house. This was
OF wood, neatly built, and contained
one patient who was quite alone, his
wife and daughter having both sue
cumbed to the plague. In the next there
was no case, nor the next, but in the
three following there were eight. Hard
~ house was free from it, and in
many cases, all the inhabitants being
dead, the buildings were quite tenant
less. By the time / had finished my in
spectlon it was 8 O'Clock, and / was
onita ready for breakfast. This disposed
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17

person to be killed, but the list of fatal
accidents from ballooning is compare
lively small, 20 years ago being esti-
mated at not over rs during a hundred
years of aerostation.
The use of balloons during the Amer
lean civil war and in the Franco Ger
man war, especially by the beleaguered
Parisians in 1901, is we'll known In
the postal service alone, during the
siege of Paris, more than 100000 let
ters were carried, with a total weight
of nearly 10000 tons.
1t was only a few years ago that an
authority wrote: "Of the innumerable
schemes which have been propounded
for the guidance and propulsion of bal
looms. not one has proved available.
and the machine is still manageable
only for vertical notions"
The problem of successful aerial nav
igation is being worked out in accord
ance with the immutable laws Of devel-
opment that have governed all great
inventions and discoveries from the
time of Archimedes to the present. For
example while the first balloon ascen-
sion occurred in 17S3 when the poten-
tails of electricity and steam were un-
known. and. while the latter two have
been developed almost to their utmost
in the present century, yet voyaging in
the atmosphere is still, in more than a
literal sense, lin the air" But yet,
again, while aerostatics as a science
has lain dormant or been neglected
during the past hundred years or so.
it's rivals in the art of locomotion-
steam and Observation-Disclosures in the
meantime been brought to a great state
of efficiency, viii be the most potent
factors in its development.
The aerial ship of the near future,
to-
an adaptation of the automobile or self
propelling vehicle which of late has SO
captivated the fancy OF. men of wealth,
as well as of scientists-that is. it will be
mainly dependent for it's motive power
upon some form of energy-electric,
steam or gaseOus-which the rage for
automobilism has recently brought TO
a stage approaching perfection
The difficulty which all aerOnauts
have endeavored to surmount lies in
the winds or air currents, which. in
stead of being depended upon to propel
the airship, are henceforth to be con-
sidered as merely auxiliary or as af-
fording a vehicle for fiotation, like the
waves and currents of the ocean. Nav
igation, in fact. will be transferred
from the aqueous to the atmospheric
ocean, and we shall not only have ships
of the air, but sailors. who will be as
much at home above the clouds in the
domain of Aeolus as hitherto they have
been in that of old Father Neptune
JAMES K. STROTHERS.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17
AERIAL AUTOMOBILES NOV SS5u e

The era of banooning, which was
inaugurated III years ago. comes
to a triumphant conclusion, It
would seem, just as the era of airship
sailing commences. The recent news
from Europe confirms this impression, on
the one hand chronicling the longest
balloon journey yet accomplished in the
successful voyage of the Centaure from
Paris to- kOrostysheff. a distance of
1900 miles; on the other, the contest for
the Deutsch prize, offered for the dirigi-
bic airship that shall start from the
Aero club grounds in the Bots de Bou-
logne and, after sailing around the Elf
fel tower. return to the point of depar-
ture in less than half an hour. Close
upon the heels of this comes the report
of Count Won Zeppelin's success, Oct. II,
when his great airship assembled nearly
1000 feet, tackled, steered against the
wind and made d safe descent, after be-
ing under full control more than an
hour.
The longest balloon trip up to the
year 1856 was that ACCOMPLISHED by Mr.
Green, an Englishman who covered 500
miles; but in 1859 the American bal
loonist. Mr.. John Wise, with two com
paniOns, sailed from st. Louis to Hem
derson, N. Y.-1.15O miles-in about 20
hours-at a speed of nearly a mile a
minute So for more than 40 years
America held the honors for long dis
lance balloOning, being now in second
place only and in the first class for
speed. for the same year that Mr. Wise
made his long flight Mr.. Lowe covered
a distance of 500 miles in about four
hours-at a speed of as miles per hour,
the Centaure making an average OF
only IS or 81 miles an hour
1t was esta blished by the AIontgolfiers
in 1888 that a balloon could be sent to
a great height by imitation merely with
hot air, but until quite recently it has
not been possible for man to steer or
direct his airship at viii, either with or
against the winds The desideratum
has been q dirigible or steerab Bile air
ship, and until last year this long felt
want had not been supplied But
when n Santos-Dumont Brazilian
born, who had received his education
in Paris, made his first successful ven
ture in November. sailing at will
around the Einel tower and far above
the city of Paris, it was recognized that
man was no longer to be dependent up
on the caprices of the wind-to be car
ried hither and thither as they moved
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17
A AAEssAGE FOa The GENERAL

transit, of course, but this one bears
the same relation to that as a racing
automobile bears to an auto-o omnibus.
1t is interesting to note that the very
first ascent ever undertaken by human
beings in a balloon occurred from near
" the same point as that chosen by the
latest aeronaut, two Frenchmen start
ing from the Bots de Boulogne in a fire
balloon in 1888 and, after sailing over
Paris. landing in safety a short dis
lance from the place of departure In
fact, France has always led in aero
nautical experiments. Frenchmen sent
up the first balloon, and at the present
writing they are still in the van, though
there is a generous rivalry for leader
ship between aeronauts of different ma
tionalities.
In the first successful attempt to
cross the English channel by balloon
which took place in 1855, one of the two
passengers was Frenchman-M
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17
I To Hunt Mountain Lions ;


The fourth annual lion hunt Of the
Western Slope Hunting association has
been called to take place In November,
beginning on the 1st and lasting three
days The hunt viii take place at De
beque, about 200 miles south of Den
yer, in the heart of the Rocky noun
tains. This vicinity has been selected
because it contains more lions and
bears than any other section of the
state. or, perhaps. than any other in
the Rocky mountains.
At this season Of the year all animals
begin to climb down from the mountain
heights because of the cutting winds
and snow which begins 10 fan late In
October. In their descent the noun
tain lions and bears prey upon the deer
elk, antelope and other game that may
cross their path. and when the plateau
region has been reached they begin %
kill the sheep and cattle OF the ranch
ers. The hunters Will here meet them
on neutral ground. At the station OF
Debeque the hunters win take horses
and wagons for the mountain gulch re-
gions. where these predatory animals
make their headquarters during the
winter. They win explore the country
for radius of Is miles. shooting at
everything that comes within range Of
their guns. including lions. bears.
wolves, cougars, wildcats, foxes, deer
and elk. IT will be perhaps the largest
hunt ever held in the west. There are
about 800 members Of the association,
and few of them ever miss such good
sport In addition there will be q num-
Der OF old mountain hunters who have
been invited TO take a hand. As an
auxiliary force. the ranchera IN the
neighborhood have also been invited.
and are eager to participate not only
because they desire 10 assist in the ex-
termination of their natural enemies.
but because they also like the meat and
can make a profit by selling the peits.
There VIII be about 800 people In the
hunt. They will be divided into divi-
sions Of so each, with a captain IN COM
mand and a guide. also the usual
pack of dogs, including every kind
that can run and bark. Each division.
! assigned to a certain territory with
instructions to let no lion or bear es-
cape viii have a wagon train in which
to haul back the dead beasts. At night
each division viii subdividc and
camp at the various ranches. Bear
and lion stories win be IN order OF
course. On the third day the various
divisions will return to Debeque, where
there viii be barbecue. horse and bur
TO racing, shooting matches, etc.
The members OF the association will
be armed with the latest improved
rifles, which viii dispatch a lion at
long range, but the ranchers will have
the old style shotgun. which carries
only about 100 yards. The ranoher
likes to get within close range Of these
predatory beasts. so as to be sure Of his
game Furthermore, he has no other
gun. is accustomed to the use OF the
old muzzle loader. and when he charges
IL with buckshOt or "slugs' and turns
loose something generally happens
A number of eastern sportsmen,
friends of members OF the association,
have been invited and may attend.
J. n. SCANLAND.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17

tower, when a practical demonstration
was given of its capabilities.
Since that experimental flight NJ. San
-Dumont has projected a larger air.
ship, with a ten horsepower motor, and
a rIIdder of more durable material than
the first, which was the cause of an ac-
cident while in the air. AS shown in
the illustration, the driver or engineer
of the airship is seated on a bicycle
saddle, with engine and steering appa-
ratus Immediately at hand, while so
feet above his frail support towers the
vast bulk of the cylindrical balloon, 80
feet long and 10 feet in diameter. There
will have to be enlarged carrying ca
pacity for the practical airship of
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17
JOHN 4JAcOB ASTGR
! AND HIS RACING AUTOMOBILE .

ing rapid strides here, and American
ingenuity may confidently be trusted 70
overcome the lead of other countries, at
present we are still near the tail end Of
the procession From statistics gather
ed from all civilized countries short
time ago it appears that almost all Of
them hold within their bounds many
more automobiles than this country.
The cause, or, rather, the chief cause,
is the execrable condition of so many
of our country roads. In comparison
with the splendid highways of Europe,
most of our roads deserve classification
with the mud streaks of China. Such
a condition is in itself a standing dis
making toward its alienation viii go
far to make the automobile a familiar
sight even in our smallest villages.
During the past year, figures for which
are not yet available, American manu-
facturers have been turning out auto
biles at a great rate, so that when re-
liable statistics are again gathered the
United States will probably be found TO
have overhauled most Of it's European
competitors in the horseless race. A
recent feat of an American automobil-
list has attracted the attention and
wonder of Europe. John Brisben Walk
Gator. almost succeeded in scaling
Pixies peak with his machine. His ex-
periences in descending the mountain
while endeavoring TO keep his fiery
mount from running away with him
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17

but could direct his vehicle as he chose.
This statement is made. of course.
with some reservations, for all the OBJ
stacles to perfect aerial navigation
have by no means been overcome, and
the sun and the winds may Yet have
as great sport with the venturesome
aeronauts as in the days of fable they
are said to have had with their prede-
cessors, DaedeIus and Icarus.
One thing has been settled by the ex-
periments of Nj. Santos Dumont. and
that is the fate of the so called aero
plane, which was a creation with great
wings, huge and bulky. Such aero
nauts as Professor Langley of the
Smithsonian institution at Washington
and Maxim, the great inventor. have
been working toward the development
of the aeroplane or aerodrome-as the
formers machine is called-but, while
each has been able to record that this
invention could raise itself in the air
and even make a short flight. no meas
ure of success was attained at all COM
parable to that achieved by the Brazil
ians
In the latest, and what win probably
be the best, form of airship adopted,
the balloon idea is still retained-that
is, a gas filled vessel as a means of sus-
pension IN the air-but with the addi-
ton of a motor for propulsion attached
TO it. The shape of the gas bag is mod
flied, however, and is either cylindrical
or cigar shaped, this being the form
adopted by Santos-Dumont. by Count
Won Zeppelin, whose giant airship made
such good records in July and October
of this year at Lake Constance, and by
the German government for its war
balloon
The cigar shaped or cylindrical bal
loon, then, is the accepted type of the
future, it having been proved manage
able and comparatively safe. NJ. San
tos-Dumont has succeeded in producing
three and one-haIf horsepower and q
speed of 20 miles an hour, it is claimed,
with his gasoline motor, Weighing only
so pounds, which is the best combina-
ton that has as yet been effected
Little can be added to what has al
ready been written to further elucidate
the structural features and working
scheme of this airship, which the ac-
companying illustrations SO amply
demonstrate. The inventor and his air
ship have been familiar objects to Pa
risians and visitors to the exposition
during the past summer. and thousands
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17

Not alone in France have the military
advantages of the automobile been seen
and taken advantage of. All the other
European nations are keenIy alive to
the fact that an increased efficiency of
transport means an enormous increase
in the effectiveness of an army and
they are devOting much thought to the
subject. Germany follows close in the
footsteps of France in military matters,
save when she is in the lead herself
and the pet of the German emperor
and. people-the army-is well provided
with military automobiles
Italy. Russia, Austria and Belgium
are not far behind in the race. and the
last named country has introduced the
horseless wagon into the Kongo. There
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-11-17
* KKTLE-A- EAINg TE faAcHlNE.

racts and rapids. To see the automo-
bile doing good service in Genital Afri-
ca, half a century ago sunk in blacklist
barbarism, is indeed an evidence of
progress.
Although the dream of the American
artist, who recently saw in his minds
eye d regiment of automobiles charging
down hill in lieu of cavalry, viii prob
ably never be realized, automobiles are
being extensively adopted in another
branch of military service Self pro-
polling gun carriages are an assured
feature of future warfare, and the or
der to Timber up the gunsl" so ia
miliar to students of civil war history,
viii be changed to Steam upi" or
Put on the CURRENT While further