Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-07-17
THE PILLOW. FAD.

THE PILLOW FAD.
She made up sofa pillows
Till they spread like gorgeous pillows
Ger the couch that held the 'natomy Of
him she loved the best.
She kept on adding pillows,
Funny patterns, pussy willows.
Pillows, pillows. pillows. pilloWS-till the
poor man couldn't rest.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
-:o:-
1t was of course, the seaside vender' 5,
natural prerogatiye to Use slang in its
most modern aggravated form, says the
Washington Star. He was serving hot
ErankfurterS on one Of the hottest of
days and was hurt when a superheated
epicure with a fancy hatband inquired:
Are there any broiled Holsters around
this placer
Plenty of en- the vender answered
''They keep strolling up off the board
walk every few minutes
-:O:-
Boston culture gives the advantage of
great command of language, as this eX-
tract from the Journal shows: "A white
gowned maiden, evidently from some col
lege or high school, stopped before a
day afternoon. She didn't look as if she
could say this-but she did: Gee it's
hotter than Tophetr'
About the time of the collapse of the
Confederacy ex-senator Wigfall WAS
crossing the Mississippi, making his way
to Texas. lie assumed the character
boat with him was Il federal officer, wits
whom Wigfall got into conversation.
The officer confded to him that he was
chasing Wigfall. If | fall in with the
traitor, I'll hang him to the first tree
Yes" vehemently remarked Wigfall.
land | will be pulling at one end"
Husband-"What! You bought an ar
tificial arm?''
Wife-''Yes, dear. You see it was a
great bargain, and
Husband-"Great Scott. What are
you thinking of? You haven't any earth
ly use for such q thing"
Wife-"But, dear, you know you trav-
ell on the railroads a great deal and you
can never tell what may happen. Phil
adelphia Press.
His Nature.-''You never can believe
what the India Rubber Man says con-
fided the Circassian Princess to the Wild
Man from Borneo.
Why" asked the latter
"Oh. he is always stretching things"
glggled the lady with the upright hair
Baltimore American.
NO said the lady prisoner, II cannot
show you the bottle in which | carried
the yitriol, as it was broken in the af-
fray, but before [ used it [ had it photo
graphed. | Will give you one of the pic
lures at onceT'
Such thoughtful appreciation of the de-
mands of journalism was sure to raise
in behalf Of the accused a powerful in
Huence not to be ignored 1ndanapolis
Press.
The Absent Mother-in-Law--As the
Victorian contingent was parading the
streets of Melbourne a woman pounced
on volunteer and cried: You don't es.
cape your lawful welded wife like that
On being dragged away she added: 'Oh,
if I'd only brought mother with me-.
We'd have stopped you if we'd had TO
hammer the whole blessed contingentr'-
St. James Gazette.
at costs the government about $1,000
to buy 4 good mule and ship him over
here" writes Lee Rogers, Missouri
member of the Eighteenth infantry, from
the island of Luzon. Filipino horses
are worth S25-the same price as Fill
Pine women; but [ think the price of
women will go up here, because on the
other islands they sell for from SO to
$40.'
Dear me.'' she said, Il wonder what
has become of that household journal"
He didn't say word.
There was another recipe IN it that
wanted to try.
He smiled. for now he was assured that
L L Io,ao ,hnr1 hr hYrp an1