Catoctin clarion., 1900-08-23
WHY HEDODGED WAR
ONCE WAS ENOUGH FOR THE
TRAVELLING MAN.

His Fourth Of July Experience With
Explosives in Patriotic PennsyI.
vania Town Convinced Him That
He Did Not Want to Go to War.
The travelingman who sells hard.
ware remarked that he was afraid
that he would die Of heart disease II
he was ever compelled to go to the
front. His friends wanted to know
what made him think so, and after
lighting a fresh cigar he said:
1T was several years ago that
made up my mind never to go to war
unless there was great need OF men
and my decision was not changed.
Business had been good with me,
nnd landing in certain Pennsylvania
town one Fourth, | determined to
take day off and celebrate the day.
The result was that | walked over
half the place, attended picnic IN
the afternoon danced until my feet
were weary and returned to the hotel
FOR dinner pretty we'll tired. SO far
so good, but l did not know where to
stop.
after dinner a man of my acquaint-
nnce proposed that we go out to see
the fireworks and off we went deter
mined not to lose an hour of our holi-
day. The fireworks display was to
be on top of a high hill, almost
mountain, on the edge of the town,
and, as | remember it now, that
hill went almost straight up and
down. We followed the big crowd,
though, and at last reached the top.
About every one in town was on the
summit of that hill before Q o'clock,
when the display was scheduled to
begin, and we were crowded and joSt-
led on all sides.
"In due season some one put big
rocket in place and touched it Off 1t
started with a rush, rose high in the
mir and exploded While the sparks
were falling all the women said, An.
long drawn out, and half the folk
crowded around to get better view.
There was woman with big straw
hat right in front of me and | was
stepping when there was roar
in the middle of the platform where
the fireworks were lying. Before any
one knew what was wrong a big sky
rocket darted over the heads OF a
thousand or so spectators, so close
that they could feel the rush of air
following 1t.
"A moment later tlourpot began to
spout unexpectedly and seeing the
sparks falling all over the platform
most of the spectators decided that
It was time for them to go. Yours
truly was among the number. |
started down the hill on a run and
was soon making tenfoot jumps.
Even then | was only holding my own
with a big fat woman just in front
of me and there were some in the
crowd who should have been handi-
capped to make anything like an
even race.
I'VE made a quick trip, that is my
friend and myself, but the skyrockets
were going mach faster. They kept
passing over our heads constantly and
once big wheel of some kind sailed
by me going toward the bottom of the
hill like a runaway. About a hun
drcd yards from the top of the hill
there ran a stone wall perhaps four
feet high and some Of the highgc
sprintcrs went bang into it. The men
and women who did not lose con
sciOusncss grOancd or screamed when
they struck It and hearing the uprOar
IN front OF me slowed up NIUE ana
then making out the fence through
the darkness Naulted over II WIN
sigh Of relief.
But my troubles were not cnded.
1t happened thai Il h)!SkF lronWorkeF
had chosen shelter behind the renee
just when | went over ana my tcct
came down fairly IN the mlddle OF MS
back when | landed. lie started 10
swear like a trooper ana hall rose 10
give me a short SWING whrn SKY
rocket struck the top OF the wall I'M
mediatcly in front OF MIN ana stuck
there while 1t sent RED ana green balls
back mp the hiil IN great shape.
THAT settled the lron"orker' tie
ducked down in a hurry ana before
he had time to think OF me again
had rolled tea feet away and was
sticking to the lecward side or me
wall trying to keep my heart from
choking me. ! succeeded, but 1t was
hard work, and it was really weeks
before the effects OF my run and the
excitement had passed away
"All the men and women who had
passed me in the stampede were
keeping as close to the wall as they
could, but there others coming and
the early arrivals had troubles OF
their own. Somehow | escaped, but
few Of the others we're so fortunate.
The irOnworkcr was notable eX
ample. Less than ten seconds after
the heels of my patent feathers had
Scrapcd along his back he suffered
another accident. This time he had
an pncOuntor with "a man of near his
own weight who came over the fence
dragging small boy with him.
They both landed on my would,be
antagonist and he gave yell that
could be heard above the noise of the
H.,