davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

I thought made a big hit with
Nts Gotrox when she asked mo for
iJ photograph.
Well didn't your"
No: sho wrote on u. out when this
ols and gave Il 10 her maid"
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Mr.. snppolgh-I believe l viii visit
mind reader and allow him to ex'
pertinent with me.
Miss Gahhy-lf you do he viii think
he Is reading a bicycle advertisement
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Little sister-'whars the difference
tween lectricity aud llghtnin'?"
Little Brothor-"You don't have to
pay nothin' fur lightnln'. Tit Bits
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Negotiations fora commercial treaty
with France have been satisfactorily
concluded by the brazilian minister OF
foreign affairs.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Whats the matter. my dear?" her
mother asked you look worried"
II am" replied tho young noyellss'E
wife.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29
OUR BUDGET OF FUN
SOME GOOD JOKES ORIGINAL
AND SELECTED.

A safe Proposh on In Catdom - Incen'
si.tcncy severely Punished or How the
Professor Was Corncrcd by the sum
mor Girls.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

a dispatch from Cnpctovu says 1t Is
reported there that president Kruger
Is In feeble condition.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Tho Chinese army called the "EiFh,
banners nomiually contains about
100000 dcccudant. Of the Manchu con.
pucrors aud their allies.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

lem sure piao's Cure for Consumption saved
ny life three years uro Mn. Tros. R1uniNa,
hauio Street. Norwich. n Y, Fob, u, ipoo
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Mrs. Younglsh-"oh. Bob. what shall
| 90? Baby Is crying because won't
lG him pull all tho fur on my new
NM "
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Luke warme-''Thars funny al
ways thought strikes we're the prinsi.
pal efforts OF the st. Louis team"
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

NJ. Youngish-"wsn. that's all
light Give him the eat,"-Tit-Blts
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

The Japnucsc press expresses the
opinion that Japan must, with or with
out the consent Of the powers, adopt
active measures.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Mack o'Rell-"Ths strike prevented
the baseball game In st. Lsuis last
week"
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

The Langshans are natives OF north
ern China.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Mother Maltese-"Tom Pitch. before
you continue your singing lesson, step
Guy here among these potted plants.
The old man won't risk them with
bootjaek."
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

NO. but Two selected that for a
subject. pa. and now I've only got to
dhi out what II is."
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Polly. have you written your Rradu-
atng essay on ModorI Humanitarian
irm'7"
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29


THE shades OF night were falling
fast"
SO runs one OF the poets lines.
lie was doubtless passing a mansion
grand.
Just as the servant pulled he blinds
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Now Teachor-NeXt boy. what's your
manner
Boy-william. ma'am.
What Is your other name7"
"scrappy Bill"
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1900-06-29

Uso Coke Dandrun Cure regularly and
your hair will not fall out All druggists
The commonwealth. (Scotland Neck, N.C.) 1896-1929, 1900-10-11
IT HAPPENED In A DRUG STORE.

zone day last winter lady came to
my drug store and asked for brand of
cough medicine that did not have In
stock" says Mr.. G. r. Grandin, the
popular druggist of Ontario, N. Y. "She
was disappointed and wanted to know
what cough preparation I could rec
ommend. I said to her that could
freely recommend Chamberlain g
Cough Remedy and that she could
take bottle of the remedy and after
giving it fair trial if she did not find
it worth the money to bring back the
bottle and would refund the price
paid. In the course OF a day or two
the lady came back in company with
a friend in need of a cough medicine
and advised her to buy a bottle OF
Chamberlain's Cough Remedy. Icon
slider that very good recommendation
for the remedy" The remedy owes
its great popularity and extensive sale
in large measure to the personal rec
concentrations of people who have
been cured by its use. It is for sale
by E. T. Whitehead & Co. Druggists.
The commonwealth. (Scotland Neck, N.C.) 1896-1929, 1900-10-11
Cooling The Water.

Youths Companion
Bridget Leary has an inventive gen.
ius which displays itself, not only
through the medium of elaborate and
mysterious made Dishes" but in other
ways as we'll.
Bridget, did the iceman fail to
come to-day, or what is the reason
there VAS no Ice in the water pitcher
at dinner tonight? ?" asked Bridget
mistress one hot summer evening.
He came, mim," said Bridget,
"but the Ice melts away so fast on me
that l thought twas we'll to save 1t all
for the frigerator, and not be chipping
1t of Tor the table. So | filled the
pitcher hall hour before dinner was
served, min, and / set Mary Ann 70
fannin' it, which she did against her
will, the lazy creaturs, up till the very
minute the folks came into the din
lng-r0om, min T.
The commonwealth. (Scotland Neck, N.C.) 1896-1929, 1900-10-11
HFR0 OF WHITE
SUPREMACY.
Simmons For Senator.

Voter in Charlotte Observer.
The United States senatorship Is the
highest honor State can confer upon
one OF its citizens This honor should
be bestowed upon that citizen most
worthy to bear it. The worthiness OF
candidate in a Democratic primary
should be determined by ability, party
fealty and party service.
Mr.. Simmons has that native vigor
of mind and that ease and prompt
tude of whatever he undertakes which
demonstrate his ability. AS lawyer,
orator and statesman he has no super
Tor tn North Carolina, and as pcliti-
clan, or a man versed in the science OF
government and the art OF governing
he has no equal In the State. North
Carolina will need the ability OF Mr..
Simmons In the United States Senate
to defend the constitutional amend
ment from the attacks which the Re
publicans propose in their platform to
make on It.
No man In the State has been
more loyal to the Democratic party
than Mr.. Simmons. He has fought
and won two glorious battles for DEM
cracy. He has suffered the most bitter
persecution, abuse and traduction from
his enemies all for the sake of Demo
cracy. He has given four years of his
time and much of his means to redeem
the State from negro rule. He has
conqured Butler and Pritchard and put
the enemies OF Democracy to flight.
Will the Democracy of North Caro-
lima give Mr.. Simmons ingratitude in
exchange for his loyalty? The people
of this State are too just, too honest,
too true to defeat Mr.. Simmons. Dem
ocracy loves loyalty and gives 1t in re-
turn to loyalty.
MIR. Simmons has rendered the par
ty greater service than any other one
living North Carolinian. Mr.. Simmons
accepted the Craftsmanship of a party
that was disorganized, and reorganized
it. All the dlscordant elements of the
party were brought together under
his brilliant leadership. He marshaled
his forces with such a mastery hand
that the enemy was defeated in every
skirmish and annihilated in one great
campaign for white supremacy. He
is the one great central figure in that
famous and glorious event in the his
tory of the otate-its redemption from
negro rule.
The enemies of Democracv are the
enemies of Mr.. Simmons. The friends
oil Democracy should therefore be the
friends of Mr.. Simmons, and vote for
him tor Senator. This is suitable honor
for the hero of white supremacy.
VOTER.
The commonwealth. (Scotland Neck, N.C.) 1896-1929, 1900-10-11

When you have no appetite, do not
relish your food and feel dull after
eating you may know that you need a
dose of Chamberlain's Stomach and
Liver Tablets. Price. rs cents. Sam
pies free at E. T. Whitehead & Cos
drug etore.
The commonwealth. (Scotland Neck, N.C.) 1896-1929, 1900-10-11
These unwelcon1e :
B1zeefagz
BGzzES

Mr.. B. II. Pratt, Cave, S. c.. writes ::
"For twenty years 1 was sorely
afflicted with boils and carbuncles
caused by impure blood It is impos-
sible to describe my suffering part of
the time being unable to work or sleep.
ali the so-ca1led blood remedies, but
nothing seemed to do me any good
During the summer of 1885 was per
suaded to Try S. S. s., and after taking
several bottles was entirely cured, and
have had no return of these painful
pests up to the present time"
and any information or advice W
whatever for this service. Send
The commonwealth. (Scotland Neck, N.C.) 1896-1929, 1900-10-11

The corner Italian and the dramatic
critic are both kept busy roasting
chestnuts.
The commonwealth. (Scotland Neck, N.C.) 1896-1929, 1900-10-11
Notice..

Having qualified as administra'rx
in the estate of Mrs. Mary Jane Hy.
man, deceased, I hereby give notice to
all persons indebted to said estate to
make payment. All persons having
claims against said estate will present
them for payment within twelve
months from this day or this noti CO
will be pleaded in bar.
This September Is, 1900.
MARY E. AUsBON.
9-27-6t Administrative.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1900-12-09
Insanity in Army Camps.

(From the Philadelphia Medical Journal)
Mental disease in military life may be
more common and more productive of evil
than we think. If an insane commander
is given such Il position that all 5uhor-
dnates cannot possible criticise or make
their suspicious known for fear of the
swift punishment that follows lack CT
discipline insidous and awful errors and
wrongs may result and may continue
long time before superior and far-away
officers suspect the true condition lt is
said that during recent war balloon
was sent up which. instead of defining the
enemy's position, revealed that of the
general ordering the balloon and of his
troops to 100 gunners who only awaited
the Indication to play havoc with their
shells.
The commander. il is further said is
now known to have been insane. his
father. mother. and sisters having died
insane. Suppose that chronic meningitis
should exist in general entrusted with
the conduct of n campaign far from the
seat of the central government. ana that
he should have decisions Of grandeur.
with other symptoms OF profound but not
easily recognized morbid mental action.
Incalculable mischief would ensue before
he would be suspected and before he could
be recalled. The application of PSYCHE
airy to military life is suggestion OF
possible tremendous significance in view of
the wars existing in all parts of the world
many thousands OF miles away from the
capitals OF civilization.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1900-12-09
TO PRESERVE OLD RUINS.
Cash Sought as Aid I'm 6
British EnterprIse.
Trom the Chicago Timcs-Herald.)

From the Chicago TimcsHcrald)
c. r. Ashbee. Of Kings College, Essex
House, England. is in Chicago to secure
American cooperation in the preserva-
ton of historic sites and buildings in
England He came to this country as the
representative of the association known
as the National Trust for Places Of His
toric interest. The plan proposed by him
last night at q meeting in Hull House
contemplates the extension of the organi-
cation into an international association,
with the field of operation extended to all
English-speaking countries.
Mr.. Ashbee hopes TO organize branches
throughout the United States which shall
affiliate with the home organization in
London. 1t would be the aim of this in
ternational association TO assist in the
work of restoring and preserving worthy
objects both in this country and in the
British Empire. During the past four
weeks Or. Ashbee has been working in
the Eastern States, and he says most
generous spirit of cooperation has been
manifested in New York and Massachu-
sets. where there are many historic Co
lonial buildings.
THE trust appeals" said Mr.. Ashbee,
mot only to all lovers of their country,
hut also TO all those who by race or Ian
guage arc brought up in English traditions
or TO whom the historic associations of
England are dear. Ii is hoped that sup
port will be found among English-speak-
ing people throughout the whole world;
that the many who look to England rs the
parent Of their own institutions will take
the opportunity of helping to preserve her
many charms for the entire race"
With the view 10 facilitating the work
local committees are being formed wher-
ever possible in the United States and the
British colonies. All local committees in
America will be asked 10 nominate men,
beers Of a general American council. This
body at its first meeting will effect per-
manent organization. decide upon plan
Of campaign and prepare TO cooperate In
every way possible with the English coun-
ellis. The minimum subscription for
American members will be So.
One Of the principal objects Of the as
ISOLATION is the formation of clubhouse
and bureau OF historic information avaiia
bic TO members from all parts Of the Eng
lish- speaking world. To this end the Lon
don council is at present endeavoring to
secure the old Henry VIII palace in Fleet
Street, formerly the chancery Of the Duchy
of Cornwall. 1t is proposed to give there
facilities end directions to members who
desire to study historic spots in the Ait
ish Isles In the course of their travels
through the United Kingdom.
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1900-12-09
THE QUEENS NEW YACHT.
A Peril That Led to It's COnstruc-

froln the London Chronice.)
The new royal yacht which the Prince
of Wales inspected at Portsmouth en- Mon
day last has been described and compared
with other royal yachts ad nauseam. Fer
speed, her tonnage, her coal capacity. all
these things have been related. But there
are other things less known if they are
known at all, which, now that the yacht
is completed may be of interest
To begin with, the reason why a new
yacht was ordered is known to very few
people. Every one, of course. has vague
idea that the present Victoria and Albert
is by way of being the veteran ship of the
navy list-she dates from the Crimean
War-but mere antiquity was not the rea-
son why a new yacht was required. The
old "V. and A" is still in very good con-
dition, and able to steam as fast or faster
than the escorting cruisers that usually
accompany her; while as q thing of beauty
she leaves little to be desired. Indeed
so far as looks go she is far and away SUI
perior to the new yacht. The real trouble
is that, dating from the days when peo-
pie were less particular or else less skill
full at keeping ships atlOat than now. she
has practically nothing in the way of wa
ter-tight compartments. And this was
dramatically realized not long before tie
new yacht was laid down.
1t came to be realized in this fashion:
During one of the Queens voyages the
Victoria and Albert was steaming through
fishing fleet. when suddenly there de-
scended sea fog. b!Otting out every
thing. At once the yacht was elowed
down. and the steam siren set a-hooting.
The peril was imminent and serious. for
at any moment heavy fishing boat might
collide with the fragile yacht. and il that
had happened the Victoria and Albert
would almost inevitably have been sunk.
Hastily preparations for this dread ros-
sibility were made.
Presently the Queen-all innocent of her
annoyed by the below of the
siren and sent an order about the "hor-
rhle noise" II was necessary to ex-
plain something of the situation to her
ard at once. The officer in command of
the yacht proceeded to do so, telling the
Queen tha: they were in a fog. fishing
boats all around, and collision at least
possible.
oh, the poor fishermen,' said the
Queen. Keep the siren going-it would
be awful if We ran any of them down.
SO the siren booted during the three
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1900-12-09
ounrrie- Of Old Egypt.

From the Chautauquan
On the way to Philae and the head Of
the cataract. short distance south of
Assouan. we come upon the ancient quar-
ries which supplied the granite for the
columns. statues. and obelisks throughout
Egypt for many centuries. An obelisk
which we saw lies in its native bed 1t is
ninety-fve feet in length and three sides
have been carefully cut. but for some TN
known reason it was never separated en-
tirely from the parent rock. The surface
bears the tool marks OF the workmen.
The grooves in 1t show that IL was to
have been reduced at the sides. IL Was
supposed that the stone was split from
its bed by drilling holes in the rock and
filling them with wooden wedges, which
were afterward saturated with water, the
swelling wood furnishing The power.
From illustrations in the temples it is
clear that these great monuments were
foated down the river on hatboats and
RATS and then carried inland b. artificial
canals or dragged overland by thousands
of slaves. In enc of the tomhs at BENZ
Iassan is a picture illustrating the pro-
cess. The great stone is loaded upon
huge sled drawn by multitude of work
men. One man is engaged in pouring wa
ter upon the runners to prevent friction
Another stands at the left OF the statue
and beats time. that the men may work
in unison. while overseers. provided with
whips urge the labCrers to their task.
What king desired 10 extrlcate this block
frcm the quarry, why 1t was left here
what IL was to commemorate we can never
know. The riddle of the sphinx Is solved.
but the riddle of the obelisk in the quarry
will no doubt remain with us forever
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1900-12-09

hours fog the Queen all the time in a
state OF great perturbation. never dream
ing that she was in much greater peril
than the fishermen. Fortunately no fish
ing boat came near. but it was all a mat
ter of Providence and good fortune: the
crew were helpless. The Queen, full OF
solicitude for the purely mythical danger
she had ccnjured up as looming over the
fishing boats, was the only person on
board the yacht not in agony OF appre-
hension for the ~ and A." The incident
was. of course. reported. II was equally.
of course. kept quiet; but the new yacht
was decided on very soon afterward. and
laid down so soon as ever building slip
was available.
How the new yacht met with an acci-
dent in dock the criticisms heaped uron
her. the official acknowledgment Of an er-
ror in her design-all these things every
one knows. She was to have been a thing
of beauty; but Portsmouth Dockyard has
removed all trace of that. The lofty
masts and tunnels have all had TO be
shortened, a fine raised forccastle has
been all removed save in the extreme
bow. where to do SO would have entailed
the destruction of singularly gorgeous
fgurehead. The once shapely yacht has
in consequence OF these changes grown
squat-she has gone through metamor
phosis suggestive of the change from the
slight. graceful girl Of twenty to the COM
Portable matr0n of twenty years later.
She is a matronly looking craft now. but
She is steady and solid, where before. ow-
ing to that error in design, she was lar
too lively to be satisfactory.
Among the many internal changes in the
yacht the removal Of many two feet thick
sound proof saloon walls and non-famma-
Bile wood partitions is worthy of notice, il
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1900-12-09
Bu.xards Lenve Galveston.

Trom the New Orleans Times Democracy
"One of the most curious results of the
great Galveston storm" said gentleman
who has lived for a number of years in
the tempest-swept city, was the total
destruction of the buZZards From time
out of mind the lower end OF the island
has been a favorite haunt of these birds,
and they could be seen there any day by
the hundreds. After the storm it was gem
orally supposed that they would flock to
the scene of ruin, and the appearance of
the noisome creatures was looked Tor
ward to as an inevitable finishing touch
on the horrors of the great catastrophe.
But, much to our surprise. none was 10 be
seen, and since then have been all over
the island and find that they have com
pletely disappeared. good many OF the
old-timers said they had taken refuge on
the mainland. and would be back again
in a few days, but weeks have elapsed
and none has appeared. The only ex-
PLANTATION is that they either persisted on
the spot during that terrible night or
were blown out to sea and drowned
In speaking of the matter the other
day an old fisherman told me OF an al
most similar occurrence of the coast OF
Florida. He said there was small ISL
and below Cedar Keys that was formerly
a great resort for buzZards; In fact, 1t
was known among the natives as Buzz
yards Cay For some reason or other
the big birds made it their rendezvous,
and the spot was practically surrendered
othem One night about ten years ago
terrible tropical storm came sweeping
up the coast and this little island SEEM
ed TO be directly in the path OF the cy-
clone centre. At any rate. 1t waE swept
clean and the whole colony OF buzzards
was drowned The fisherman told me that
scores of them were washed up on the
mainland and not another one was ever
seen on the cay. The new generation
avoided it instinctively. Perhaps they
have a way OF handing down such ira
ditions."
The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1900-12-09
LAST OF THE BUCCANEERS.
Relies Discovered In Maine Revive
Memories of Pirates.
From the Boston Post

From the Boston Post.)
The memory of the last of the buccan-
GERS has again been revived by the dis
coveIy OF undoubted relics of his career
as Ear north as Bangor Me.
II is true the present discovery amounts
to nothing more definite than hole which
is sal to be the exact size of the report
ed mysterious boxes of gold which the
doughty Captain Kidd is believed to have
strewn along the coast of America, and
which have been traced all the way from
South Carolina to the present location,
which is believed to be the '-farthest
north yes made in Kids record. or
course however. a hole cannot sustain a
pirates reputation. and the present treas
ure trove includes also. as yesterdays
despatch from Bangor states. IAN old
fashioned lip. such as covered all old-fasE
toned locks, mud broken key. fCuud sr
the hole These Inc narrator naiysls
adds. are proof o. the discovery
The legend that mas existed for wears
IN this favored iscaIIv that sDr'e ~ me
coveted remains OF the great pirate
we're hurried at f.ser's Point. IN the I'M
mediate vicinity. IS thus proyed % hlve "a
somewhat mere stable foundation thic
the credulous imagination OF several sue
cessive generations of Maine farmers.
Many parties says the despatch be-
fore referred 10. nave aug over 'he
ground in the hope OF hnding the treas
urc. The land is owned by Messrs. Wood
man and Buzzell, and Mr. WOodman has
discovered hole from which ii is efi-
dent box 12x16 inches has been remov-
cd"
Historical hole. In addition to grandly
stimulating the imagination Of the whole
American nation. to say nothing of the
pitch of frenzy 10 which the dwellers OF
Eber's Point have been wrought. this par
allelogram Of, let us say, space. will at
once take its place among the great ie-
gends which hover fondly over Captain
kiids name. These have connected his
place of hiding, or rather that Of his treas
ure-Kidd himself was. we believe, hang
ed in England. as the natural close OF his
picturesque career-with almost every ISL
and, peninsula or promontory, to say noth-
ing of every natural cave. gully or even
promising growth OF underbrush on the
Atlantic coast.
Some OF the most likely or these le-
gends have been done into immortal fic-
ton and have even figured on the stage.
Who can forget Edgar Po.'s weird story
of the Gold Bug wherein the genius OF
this consummate artist Is devoted TO
evolving the mystery in a cryptosram
which stands today one of the euriosities
of Literature?
The scene OF the story is lald on an ISL