New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1900-06-03
From The London Globe.


be glad If definite answer on this point"
Here detachment from ideas is merely ludi-
crous. II has. however, another side. Early in
January a battalion was ordered to The front
which was short of officers. The Colonel know
ing that the twin battalion in India was exactly
the reverse. wrote To the War ONCE explaining
the circumstances and urgently requesting that
the full strength of his command might be made
up by an exchange, the officers being sent direct
TO Durham. In great anxiety he waited a week
without / reply The day before he left his
own letter was returned to him, and across it a
red tape official had scrawled in blue pencil.
'IniS Application should be sent in duplicate
The battalion therefore, sailed from SOuthamp-
ton short of officers with perhaps unfortunate
consequences in the field But red tape knows
nothing about actually: its limits bounded
by form,
THE FIRST MESSAGE FROM METHUEN
Even in South Africa the red tape dend is at
large. When communication was first estab-
hShed between Kimberley and Lord Methuen's
column on the Modder River it fairly outdid it,
self. The town, which had already borne some
OF the rigors of the siege was naturally anxious
10 near news of the relieving force, OF. at any
rate, to receive some acknowledgement that it
was invested by the Beers. Greatly to its dis
appointment and Indignation this the first
message flashed to Colonel Kekewich Please
inform the Remount Department, Wynberg,
what IS the number marked on the left hoof Of
morse supplied to Sergeant OGorman-' To the
depressed garrison Of Kimberley this message
sounded like mOckery of their sufferings but it
was merely display of red tape.
on the authority of Mr.. Rhodes, another story
Ihfpughout the siege the military authorities
failed to record the death of a single colonial
though locally raised forces were the main
strength Of the garrison. Nevertheless in the
Kimberley garrison orders occurs a notification
to the effect that Mule No. -. having died. IS
hereby struck off the strength Of the North
Lancashire REGIMENT" To red tame tranSDort
animal Of the Regular Army is Of more con-
sequence than many troopers and officers of
irregular corps
An official not so long ago went some little
distance from London ON public business. on
his return he sent in a bill of the expenses he
had incurred on the journey. one item was the
small sum of threepence, opposite which, for
want Of a better term, he wrote porter" To
his astunIshment the bill was returned to him
with an intimatiou that no allowance made
for liquors He explained that he paid the
money. not for a drink but to a station porter
for carrying his bag to the train. This
satisfactory. nevertheless, to save future mis-
understandings, he was asked To fill in the item
as porteraSe
\ POTTER OVER a PEG.
When peg to hang an overcoat on is needed
in an ordinary office. either Of the clerks
puts it in or workman is asked to do it. Such
simple and direct methods find no favor in A
world ruled by red tape as the following Incl
dent illustrates. The necessity for a row of
pegs on the door OF room IN a public building
having arisen. an application 10 that effect vas
sent in to the Board OF Works. 1t was returned
on the ground that the wrong department had
been consulted. The engineering department at
WOOlWich was next tried. and with better sue
cess FOR in due course an official travelled I'D to
London. considerable cost to the taxpayer. to
saa what required To be done. This the
preliminary TO business, which, after some de-
lay. appeared in the form of a mechanic. who
put up the pegs Thus 4 small job, which might
have been done for i few pence. as many
pounds in the interest Of red tape.
4 colonial official who held appointment
in a protectOrate, offered another in the
Western Pacific. which ne accepted. To get
over the ground he had been given allow
anCe for horse forage, and groom. allow
anCe which. il decided to BE- continued
in his sphere Of work. Unfortunately a
I'm rod in fATvr
scattered coral islands, neither was forage nor
groom. He. therefore, asked the red tape fend
in Downing Street if ne might keep j small
yacht instead. otherwise it would be impoS-
SIbIe for him 10 get about. Permission was
readily granted. and the Western Pacific official
gayiy took UP his new duties. But he reckoned
without red tape. In making out the schedule
OF his expenses he wrote down much fer the
and tear Of The yacht. and much for
the skipper Months later it came back TO him
with the irate demand Of a red tape clerk as to
whether he imposed that the Government pro-
Vlded him with pleasure yacht In juStifyi1S
himself he pointed out that unless he hired a
on his frequent absences inland, and in any case
ne required some one TO keep il clean. He had
Nor rely used the word skipper for want OF
better term The exclamation perfectly sat
isfaCtOry. but he was thereafter requested To
write yacht so much. forage so much. 1t was
more convenient.
Fortunately. when red tape comes in contact
with common sense il Is red tape which goes 20
the wall. \ good story is told Of an American
military secretary who devised a system which
compelled every one who went business &c
General Banks to procure ticket from i men,
door gained his a mission one cay a burly
al Of 4 n Eastern g. me n no.