The Bemidji pioneer., 1900-09-20
GRO.SSERKOPT THE
AND POLITICAL,
ScHMlDTKIN SITUATION.
DISCUSS
DISCUSS

II read by my paper in dot der
dimocratic managers make one claim
out dot the Germans vot voted for
Mckinley in 1876, already, because dey
in honest money believed, will dis
year vote against him because why
they don't been stuck on a standing
army up, said MIR. Schmidtkin with
q troubled brow. sNow, T left Ger
many when r went away, because |
could not stand dot military bixness
Won little bit. would rather shust as
Wiling be mine little bow-legged dog
und trot behind in front Of a bread
wagon den been an American citizen
nit q big standing up army to make
big taxes und other troubles, already.
vas no fighter. | like my pipe,
nnd mine beer, und mine big skunk of
sweetness und sauerkrout-vot ! call
mine wife. Und care me not to live
| by one country in when ! may be
grated nit the army und must carry
one gun pistol in der Philippines yet.
vas like Grover Cleveland. I could
fight besser nit one substitute. Aber,
have not so much money to keep one
substitute in der army all der time
vonce- BY shiminy Christmas! like
not dis talk about Won big standing
army, more var ships, big taxes, und
Imperialism. i like not von soldier
country q little much, und dot is vot
Mckinley Was making desc United
States, amt it?' IA
Say, John, !" seriously asks Mr..
Grosserkopt, s'vot is der matter NIT
you all der time? Hat you been sleep
ing nit Charley Towns und got Won
black-und- blue nightmare Aber
hat you been reading Lind's spooch
und got der calamity SHIN hams, yet9
Nine goodness. Vot for as der fool
killer 50 long away? Now, .shust open
your eyes shut. Did you want Nc
Kinley TO make war upon spain?n
~ ali, aber dot war
es, dot war vas ofer. You fell
lows wanted dot war plenty much.
Mckinley was some slow about de-
claring war nit Spain, und Towne,
uLd such fellows went nit der coun-
try over saying dot unser president
vas a coward ind wouldn't fight; but
shust 50 soon as Mckinley took of
mine coat und make war those fellows
began to cry out, Too much war;
our president wants a king to bel
Und when we capture der Philippines
dose fellows yell nit loud voice: Inn
perialism! Mckinley wants der earth!'
You fellows sign der peace treaty nit
Spain und get dose islands, but shust
SO soon as der Philipinoses shoot our
flag once, you yell: "Pring dot flag
home. dot was govern mitout the con-
sent OF the government Yah, you
want dot war lad then, but now you
was not brave enough to acceptsde
quenseconses. You vas shust like auf
your wife present you NIT Won pair
OF twins, und one Of dem you would
not father because it do,not look
Dutch enough TO please you, yet.
II To this fine outburst Of scorn, Mr..
Schmidtkin hlnbly replies: 'sWell,
maybe I have mistaken been. AS der
Bemidii News says, A wise man
changes his mind plenty, aber q long
fool has no turning. But don't you
tink vonce dot der future look black
nit darkness when der standing up
army gets SO big little?"
Grosserkopt springs to his feet with:
'sMine Colt, Ohm. must I use one
pile driver to shah an idea by your.
head In? Don't you think to remem-
Der dot when Mr.. Grant was running
for president dot we democrats all say
now we will hat one empire and plenty
of army if we elect Won soldier for
president. But he elected vas, und
uSi ASpuDilS v 40 LII DuSlilSSS y GU. s5slO.1
lay we have der same old song, set to
new music once. Now, you know dot
We hat 5000, 600 people in this coun-
ny; we hat q army Of 100000 men in
lese days of war. Now get your pen
III out und your wife ind figure how
much military hat we. You will find |
out quick dot our army vas three
lines less not SO much as in der days
u Jefferson und Jackson, according
Q populations. When our little var .
sh ofer, dot number of soldiers will
,e made smaller more, und der var (
ill be ofer shust so soon as we show
lose savages dot der American peo-
lies stands by der soldiers und der
lag altogether. You know too also
lot we have only one handful auf sol
iers compared NIT Germany oder
my other countries by Europe. If
GU vas afraid by Imperialism in dis
ountry, you had better black up your
ace und to North Carolina 60 where