Ellsworth American. [volume] (Ellsworth, Me.) 1855-current, 1900-01-31
Y. 2. 5. c. Z. SOCIAL.

| An amusing entertainment by the
Christian Endesvor society was given at
! fremont hail Thursday evening, Jan. Is.
A large audience assembled and all felt
well repaid for Drawing the storm, in lis
| tening to 1.-THE Old Maids Convention,
aud witnessing the working OF Prof.
| Pinkertons Electric Transform. Her.
| The convention consisted OF eighteen
old maids dressed in prim, old fashioned
costumes. The meeting was conducted
by the usual complement OF officers. The
presidents strict observance OF prelimi-
nary rules created much laughter, as did
also the secretary and treasurer's reports,
and that of the Lookout committee.
An amusing feature OF the convention
was the utter contempt OF one little old
maid toward all men. She played the
| part to perfection, arrayed in a dainty
white muslin made over sixty years ago.
She sweetly Gang Ppm happy old maid
at sixty-three". Quotations relative to
the all-absorbing questions OF "Iove" and
'man" were given by each member,
afording much amusement.
| Near the close Of the convention Pink
erton introduced himself and described
the wonderful merits OF the Electric
Transform Der, which he declared
would, after taking some of his elixir OF
+ life, transform the plainest old maid into
blooming young girl. A number OF the
old maids expressed a Willingness to try
! the experiment and each In turn stepped
| forward, and after telling the professor
| what they desired to be transformed into
and the vocation they desired to follow.
| they swallowed few drops OF the elixir
and stepped within the cabinet.
| The professor closed the door. ad-
justed the rods OF the Y, Y and
z rays, and after vigorously turning
crank for few minutes, which
| produced sound within the cabinet
more ike the rattle OF old tin cans han
dry bones, le door opened, and in place
! OF the old maid with corkscfew curis and
ancient costume, out tripped fair young
maiden in dainty dress, and with hair be-
comiugy arranged, who sang or recited
rs the case might he.
Everything happened Just rs Psoi.
Pinkertou clsimed that it would until one
old maid came forth a little dancing
darby girl causing great CONSERVATION
among tue Old maids and great applsu
in he audience. However, the professor
after recovering himself caught Miss
! Topsy, administered tablet, and quickly
thrust her sgsin within the csniuet.
! Alter giving the crank n few more turns
Topsy YVES transformed into fair haired
! maid.
| The climax was reached, however, " hen
I one OF the Old maids declared her inten-
ton of being transformed into a man.
/ Prof. Pinkerton was at his wits end, but
! 1t would never do 10 betray his inability
before this convention SO after trying
hard TO persuade her to try some other
character she entered the cal inet and the
| professor, mopping the perspirstion from
his brow Win one hand, turned the
ceans with great force with the other,
when suddenly there was loud report
aud the spinster's hat went up to the
ceiling through the opening in the top OF
the cabinet. The old maids tainted and
the curtain fell.
| After the laughter and confusion sub
| sided, ice cream and cake were served.
A neat sum Was realized for Endeavor
purposes. j. NJ. NJ.