Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-10-26

everybody who can carve it to his en-.
tire Observation-Disclosures.
Amicus-So you have another baby at
your house: what is lie like! Eminent
Critic-Well. he is not very interesting.
but he is mighty COMMUNICATIVE.
The Ideal: The vegetarian-What
kind of Il dinner did my wife put up:
Fine We liad greens and salad, and.
in fact. II dinner tit for u cow mean
for Il l:ing."-Life.
Mrs. CAatter-Do you believe al! tiis
disagreeable things you read i'll the pa
pers about people: Mrs. Tattle-Oh,
dear, no!-only when they are about
people know.-Chicago News.
II must be full of electricity" said
c.. proudly. when stroke IL cat. all
her hairs stand GU end" "Oh. that's
nothing" replied L.; I'm dog can make
her do that by just looking ut her."
Tramp-Aladam, have you an AK?
Lady OF the uouse-No. Tramp-Have
you a saw? Lady Of the House-No.
/ have no saw. Tramp-Then give me
q little something to eat, plcase.-Har-
lem Life.
ELIZA, why do you write so many let
tiers in such hot weather." We'll,
David, If l don't keep all our relatives
posted on the awful heat here they will
be landing OH us to isit."-lndianapolis
Journal.
Evidently the Head of the House:
NO" said the man at the door, II
have no views on politics." 'sWel," re-
turned the political canvasser, .in that
case I'D like to interview your wife,
Chicago Post.
Mrs. Gabbe," observed a friend of
the family, lis II very superior woma
She can converse iItelligently, l be-
lieve, OF 81 thousand different topics..'
"Yes,' sighed MIR. Cable, land she
docs."-Tit-Bit
How 1t Happened: First C%itizen-1
hat attended der bolitical meetings OF
bot parties der last ten years. Second
Citizen-Ah! You like to hear both
sides? First Citizen-Nein! l pclong to
q prass pand!-Puck.
Not Afraid: "Sle talked to him just
to let him know she. wasn't afraid OF
old bachelors" "Yes::' "And he talked
to her to let her know that lie wasn't
afraid of Widows" "Wcll:" "Oh,
they're married now."--Chicago Record.
A Double Blow: "Yes, we had quite
q blowout at our house this morning"
Peculiar time for it, Yes; the new
hired girl blew out the gus in the gas
stove, and the gas blew out the side
of the kitchen Cleveland Plain Deal
er.
Did you dance until the wee slna'
hours!" asked IL young mo. 1
didn't. We danced till the last car had
gone, and l had to walk three miles.
They were the biggest hours l ever re-
member having Observation-Disclosures
ington Star.
Byles-Did you ever come across a
more conceited fellow than Bulger?
They say lie is an atheist; and l believe
he is. Bonter-I wouldn't like to go as
far. as that; but l do know that he
doesn't recognize the existence of u SUE
perior being.-Brooklyn Life.
Impressed on Her Memory: Its
been four years now," said the deserted
lady, 'since lie left me and his happy
home. 1 remember it just as well as
yesterday-how he stood at the door,
holding it open till six flies got in the
ouse."-Indianapolis Press.
Stranger-l noticed your advertise
ment in the paper this morning for q
man to retail imported canaries. Pro-
prietor of Bird Store-Yes, sir. Are
you looking for a job? Stranger-Oh,
no. l merely had IA curiosity to know
how the canaries lost their tails.-Chi-
cago News.
He-I saw that farm that was adver-
tised, and l think I'll buy 1t. She-Oh!
Then We'll move away from the hateful
city for good: He-Yes. It's u fine
place; fourteen acres and n pond on it.
She-Won't that he nice? We can raise
pond lilies and watellnelons in it.-Phil-
adelphia Press.
There was a piece Of cold pudding on
I the lunch table. and mamma divided It
MIIIie uLu Elsie. Wllll0
looked at his pudding-tlen at his
mothers empty plate. "Mamma,' he
said. earnestly, 81 can't enjoy my pud-
ding when you haven't any. Take
Elsie's."-I.ife.
A Long-felt Want: Boss-I don't
know whether to discharge that new
boy or raise his salary. Manager-What
has be been doing? Boss-He rushed
hlto my private office this morning and
told me there was n man downstairs
who would like to see me. Manager
Who was 1t? Boss-A blind man.-Tit
Bits.
A Contradiction: Politician-My boy,
the door to every successful business ID
labeled "Push." Thoughtful Youth
Isn't your business a successful one,
sir? P0litician-Well. yes. | flatter my
self that it is very successful. Why
do you ask that? Thoughtful Youth
Because. sir, l see your door is labeled
"Pull."-Detroit Free Press. !.