The daily sentinel., 1900-08-07
RADo. TUESDAY, AUGUST 2, 1900.
SeQti7eI S1ortcakes.

l
1t is at least consoling to know that
the mercury has not yet caught up with
the price Of ice.
A local taxidermist started for Meeker
yesterday where he will put in the win
ter at his regular annual skin game.
Mans superiority over woman is again
proven in the fact that even baldhead-
ed man can easily keep his hat on with
out the use of special pin for that pur-
pose.
II reports are true it is only matter
of short time before Admiral Dewey
will have squall on his hands the likes
Of which he has not experienced in many
moons
The birth of bouncing twins to Mr..
and Mrs. Whittle yesterday will no
doubt cause an observant public to won
der whether or not they are chips off the
old block.
Jeanette Orr and Jas. K. Rowe are the
names Of Missouri couple who have re-
Gently decided to share the joys and
sorrows Of = trip together on life's
stormy seas.
With ton presidential tickets in the
field and the uncomfortable desire of
each party to have their closets swept
the cleanest. it is no surprise that the
price Of br ooms has gone up again.
Ora Crane and Ernst Giese are a
couple of Cupid's recent victims in an
Indiana town and il there is anything in
a name it is not likely they will ever be
required to resort to the use Of artificial
necks.
Tho unsettled condition Of financial
matters is illustrated in the fact that
while banks throughout the country
were not long ago bursting for the lack
OF money, now they are bursting on az
count Of having too much.
A writer in the Ladies Home Journal
says it is unhealthy to drink water in
gulps, but inconsiderately neglects to
state whether or not the same rule ap-
plies to beer and whether or not the
foam should be eaten with fork or IN
gers.
The bard who poets" in an up p-coun-
try paper no doubt fsels relieved since
getting the following off his mind:
There was young man from Ouray;
Who spent all his time eating hay;
His voice it got horse,
And sounded 80 coarse,
That now he has turned into clay.
ITO remove warts rub them with a
piece Of fresh beef daily" says "cure-
yourself at home" doctor book, While
there may be virtue in the remedy, the
expense will place it far beyond the
reach Of the average Grand Junction
citizen.
While sinking his we'll Thursday,
Judge Lewis brought up two live fishes
from a subterranean stream 200 feet be-
low tho surface of the ground one Of
which was four inches in LENGTH Monte
Vista Journal. The same man who
swallows the above without even an
apology probably never would even be-
lieve that oysters exist down below
Fruita.
The bald headed editor OF the Gazoot
very naturally fell asleep the other day
while attempting to read copy of his
paper. and it was probably while in this
condition he wrote the following
'Tis the last fly of summer
Left here in the room;
All its playful companions
Are fled up the tlume-
Have gone for the winter
Somewhere hibernatlng,
And left it alone on
Ny dome of thought skating.
The man who feeds the wild animals
in the Kopjville city park is somewhat
of poet himself and he alone is respon-
sible for the following:
MABEL.
Mabel's eyes are bright;
People stop and stare
When she walks along
With her stately air.
Mabel's step is light,
Mabel's form is good,
But wouldn't hug