The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1900-08-17
Chicago Times-Herald.

I .
| IN the direction of the glazing posters
! hung over his tents). But hadvertise in
horthodox manner. Steer clear ov sem
! satons, an you'll come out orl right t
| the top-same's I've done
What L means by horthodoX Continued
! BIossoms) is to keep to the old tricks.
Put plenty of big pictures for folks to
| gaze on an wonder what's inside the
| show; touch up the lions when the tanner
! is gettin' out ov the cage and get up a
| few narrer excapes from their clutches,
make en- roar and women shriek-all
them's orthodox; anythin' else isn't I
once 'ad a go at somethin' novel, but
| never again.
We had stuck at Sandwich for month,
and, for some reason or other, the folks
wouldn't patroniZe our show, no matter
| 'ow we bawled.
| The second week things went wuss; an
! instead of me putin little bit more
| to the nest egg as 1 was gettin' together,
an maxim it into a 'undred pounds, as I
! 'oped to do, I 'ad to draw on it.
! To make matters wuss, the next day
1 found as oW Jess 'ad bin an fallen
'ead-over' eels in luv with jake the wire
Waiker-tm as did the sensa tional dive
through the roof Now Jakes was orl
right at is business, as sharp a
needle, and could do as pretty a dive
into the net as any man I ever seed, but
decent 'usband for any girl what 'ad 'ad
a good edication, as my dartar 'ad, an so
l tells i'm off pretty straight-said as
'ow I'd sack I'm.
few nights after me an Jess 'ad bin
agitatin our original propensities wivout
result, Jakes comes up to me an says
as 'ow e ad a proposal to make.
Look ere, guvnor," says e, IF you
thinks 1 want somethin' for my little
plot which you amt wiIlin' for to give
you knows what I means-you're mis-
taken.
Everyone on the ground" e continues,
| knows as 'ow I've got a bit ov a lillin'
| for Jess, an likewise as 'ow Nina, the
daring horserder, is likewise gone on me,
which amt my fault.
WELL" says e, suppose I ranges wiz
| Nina to ave a bit ov a scene, an then
tells 'er 1 amt goin' to ave anything
more to do wiz 'er-tells 'er that afore
all the crowd, who'll talk about it until
the outsiders will ear, and come in to
sympathize wiz 'er, after which we'll
range for 'er to swear revenge, and fire
a pistol at me in the ring durin' the per-
formance-me of course, takin' the pre-
caution Of loadin' it fust wiz blank,
for seeing as Ninas fairly gone on me,
she might make a mistake an shove in
a ball. OF course, the perice will in
terfere, bein as 'oW there is no risk to
them, and she'll be bound over to keep
the peace. 1 ave already asked 'er opln-
ion, an says she: Although it seems
like trampling on mi lows young dream,
I'm willin to accommodate myself to the
circumstances for five pounds an q new
dress for the chariot scene"
I was simply struck dumb wiz aston
ishment. an grasped is and in truly
grateful manner
He seemed real glad as 'ow I agreed to
try is sensational advertisement, an
walked away. Soon afterward seed
i'm taIlun' an larfin' wiz Jess, an
guessed as 'ow it were as much 'er plot
as is for womenfolk is cute when they
wants to get married wivout their far
ver's wishes.
The same night Jakes, Jesse and Nina
come into my van an talks the matter
over. Nina was already doing the low
In woman business, which Jakes seemed
was, of course, serene, and arranged for
the fust act to come off at the next per-
Torrance, which it did wiz vengeance.
The fust as I card was Jakes sayin'
somethin' about 1uv, and / went into the
dressin room to see the fun. Nina was
spoonin' Of i'm fairly, an all the other
members If the company lookin' an
larfin'. When I arrives e shoVes 'er
away, an tells 'er in language which
amt in no dictionary as 'ow ed 'ad
enough Of 'er foolin', an never intended
| to ave anythink more to do wiz 'er, be-
| cause e loved another.
| She flushed wiz passion, which was
what was arranged, but, unfortunately
for Jakes, she inserted another hact on
! 'er own, an just went for m, carried
away by the excitement ov the moment,
I suppose. wiz 'er long nails she
scraped all the skin off is face. Jakes
fairly 'owled wiz pain, an tried to make
| 'er understand as 'ow 1t weren't real, an
nearly gave the show away before she
! cooled down.
AS we expected, the scene got talked
about, an the next day a few more
! folks paid to see the show, on purpose to
see Jakes, an larf at i'm When the
performance was nearly over I seed 'er
take the pistol from among 'er skirts,
and, when gallop'n round the ring, fire
poInt-blank at Jakes as she passed i'm.
cry of 'orrer assembled from the audi
ence, wiz shrieks of "Murder!' an such
like When I could stop larfin' I rushed
up to er an calls for the police. The
people was breathless wiv excitement,
an a murmur of relief went round when
three cops come up and took 'er into Gus
tody.
When they 'ad gone I congratulated
Jakes on the success Of is plot, an
rushed off to ball Nina QUITO find as
'ow we'd gone a bit too far, an tumbled
on a difficulty as we admit reckoned on,
for they refused to let 'er go.
When Jakes seed me return wivout 'er,
an heard my tale, e simply rolled over
on the grass an shrieked, he did-just
larfed an larfed, until I thought ed
| ave busted.
| The next morning the court was crowd
| ed wiz 'undreds OF folks, all waitin' to
! 'er tale ov love was told, people seemed
to get real sorry; an when I proved as
'ow there was only a blank cartridge in
| the weapon, an she was let off when
promised to be 'er surety, they cheered
| like mad, and follered us in 'undreds
| to the show ground again.
Nina. 'owever, wasn't over pleased. She
scroweled at them. and muttered some
thing about being kept locked I'D orl
night She only condescended to speak
| decently when l gave 'er five pounds, as
arranged, an promised 'er another couple
| If she'd do another turn. could afford
| to be generous, for when night came
| the place was packed with a struggling
mass O. humanity.
This went on for a week, the curiosity
| of the people not abatin' a bit They
seemed to scent as 'ow something more
sensational as what'd appeared before
was to come on; an for once they was
right, though I never for one moment
expected it.
I ave said as 'ow Jakes did a very
pretty dive through the roof The man
ner In what this was done was by 'avin'
ole in the tope of the tent, outside
ov which was fixed little platform.
When e 'ad finished is tight rope per
Torrance we used to fasten a sack over
lis cad an down to is waist, so that he
couldn't see nothin', is arms comm