The Iola register., 1900-02-23
KANSAS CLIPS AND COMMENTS

A Kingsley farmer sold three horses
for 500 each, which Is horse on the
horseless carriage makers.
The Coupcll Grove band has lately
added two horns and expects to play
like the devil next summer.
When q stranger wants drink at
Blue Mound he is "steered" around
to place called the "Red Heifer."
A tramp started to school at Usage
City and was fined $50. He started
one cold night and quit the next
morning.
II war is He'll, and the Hudson-Le-
land war continues in the Capital un-
I'll the Sheldon weeks comes, what q
change will be there.
The editor of the Severance NeUS
who is q full blooded Irishman, says
the better half Of him Is German, re-
ferring to his wife.
The Bible can be purchased for a
dollar, and the Capital has figured
human curiosity at twenty-five cents
per,capita per week.
The down trodden populace of
Topeka listened recently to lecture
Less Miserable ever since.
The good Republicans Of Abilene
have shipped another car Of corn to
alleviate the famine in India and thus
bolster up desperate Democracy.
A Hutchinson undertaken is adver-
tising special rates on his wares, but
even the women who can refuse bar
gains in no other line, are Btubbornly
declining to die.
The losfers have responded to the
sunshine and sat around at Cedarvale
until, the Commercial says, the hens
have mistaken the season for summer
and gone to setting too.
Dickerson capitalists are organizing
to bore for gas and are planning a
hole 5000 feet deep, although the deep
est gas we'll in the State that does
business is less than 1900.
The Galena Times includes this in
its article advocating good roads:
"The farmers want to get to Galena-
God bless them!-and Galena needs
| the farmers" That ought to dry up
considerable patch of road.
In days of yore people burned at the
stake were sometimes Sainted, but st.
|
burned last week, the fret Saint sub
jected to fire so far recorded.
The Arkansas City Traveller calls
attention to the fact that the changes
in the political parties of the State are
wholly confined to desertions of the
Populist party, nobody Joining 1t.
The Chase County Leader Gays that
in view of the fact that the people
will'offerhim neither, Jerry simpsons
statement that he would prefer to be
U. 3. Senator to being governor is
immaterial.
Chanute has destitute family
which consists of father, mother, six
children and three dogs, the last
named giving the wherefore ness of
his destitution, if the kids were not
fully capable,
The school population of Stanton
county, next to the southwest corner
county, is 81 and that means about 10
square miles for each kid to romp in
in the county. Old maids and bache-
lors should found retreat out there.
1t Ia said the reason so many women
attended the circuses last year was
because they expected to 60 to Paris
and cut a dash and they wanted
pointers i'm handling a good deal of
trunk, and got them from the ele-
plants.
A "suggestive therapeutic" doctor
is holding forth at OswegU and the
Independents picture looks more like
suggestive luuacy Every man nova
days who has thick greasy hair and
nothing else to speak Of imagines
. Ia f1II Of Nm Af
prunes, rather.
The Emporia Gazette says the mer.
chants whom he owed wept when
they saw flashily dressed youth
drive down Main streetin 81 an hour
sleigh with lovely girl by his side
And then the Gazette Stayed the (. d
youth for all time.
A tramp was recently hurt at
Oneida and they sawed Off his in
jured limb and he joined the COM
munitY for good. Oneida intends 10
become the metropolis of Nemaha
county if it takes leg all the legs OF
all the tramps.
When the mayor of Louisville, one
of the oldest towns in the State
quarantined several houses, the
quarantined people pRraded the
streets earring placards that tolC
the mayor to go to--but he preferred
taking chances with the small pox.
A rustic genius out in the western
part of the State Is going to get rict
In this way: He will put his hens il
a cyclone cellar in the dark. Then hi
will turn on the electric light in tn,
cellar, the hens will wake up, thlnl
the sun has risen, and lay an egg
After half an hour he will turn ou