The Saint Paul globe., 1900-04-29
Mg. D0olep 4s. s# Paris Exposition
Bx r. p. nUNNR.

Copyrighted. 1900. by Robert Howard
Russell.
IF this r-rush iv people to tn Paris ex
position keeps up" said Mr.. Heunessv.
they won't be enough left here f'r to ilict
prisidint"
They'll be enough left" said Mr.. Doo-
ley. There always is. No wan has gone
) fr'm Ar-rchey r-road, where the voters
ar-re made. I've looked ar-round tvry
mornin', expectin' to miss some famfIvar
faces. l though Dorgan, tn plumber. wud
go sure but he give 1t up at tn las mo-
ment, an will spind his summer on tn
dhrainage canal TIL baseball season III
keep a good NANNY others back an a
number iv representative citizens who have
STOCK or jobs in tn wire mills have de-
cided that tbs betther to inthrust their
savin's to John W. Gates thin to blow
thin in again tn sthreets iv Cairo.
But takin' it by an large twill be a
nard winter f'r tn r-rich. NANNY iv thin
will have money enough f'r to return.
out they II be much sufferin' among thin.
ixpict to have people dhroppin' in here
mex fall with subscription books f'r tn
survivors iv tn Paris exhibition. TIL
women down be tn roIlin' mills II be
SEWN fannels f'r tn distressed millyon-
aires, an whin tn childher kick about tn
food yen say, Hinnissy, Just think iy
tn poor wretches in tn Lake Shore
dhrive an thank Gawd FIR what We have
Tn mayor II open soup kitchens where
tn unforchnit people can come an get
nearly meal an watch tn ticker an
whln tn season grows hard, ven see
plnched an hungry plutocrats thrampin'
tn sthreets with signs r-readin': Give us
a cold bottle or we perish Perhaps tn
polls II charge thin an bust in their
stoVeplpe hats, tn prisidint IL sind tn
ARMY here, conspiracy IL be discover
ed at tn club to blow up tn poorhouse
an volunteers II be called on firm tn
Iickei bed houses to protect tn vested
inthrests iv established poverty.
TWill be a chanst f'r us to get even
Hinnissy. I'm goin' to organize tn Re-
turn Visitin' Nurses association. COM
posed entirely iv victims iv tn parent
plant. Twill be worth lookin' at to see
tn ladies' firm tn stock yards r-rushin'
into some wretched home down In Peer
ary avenue grabbin tn misthress iv tn
mouse be TIL shoulders an maxim her
change her unhealthy silk dhress f'r g.
PINK wrapper, shovelin' in a little ashes
to sprinkle on tn fiure, breakin' tn fur
niture an roilfn' tn baby in tn coal box.
What tn r-rtch needs is intilligint ATTN
ton. Don't ate that oatmeal Fry nice
piece iv r-round steak with onions. give
tn baby tn bone to play with, an sind
Lucille Ernestfne acrost tn railroad
thrack FIR nickel's worth iv beer. Thin
yen be happy, me good woman Oh,
twill be gram. 1 won't give anything
to people that come to tn dure. More
harm is done be indiscriminat charity
than amy wan knows. Hinnissy Half tn
bankers that II come to ye'er kitchen
mex winter cud find plenty iv wurruk to
do If they really wanted it. Dhrink an
idleness is tn curse iv th' class. If they
come to me I'll sind thin to tn Paris
Survivors Mechanical Relief association,
an they can go down an set on a cake
iv Ice an wait till tn man in charge finds
thin job managin' a diamond mine"
Mr.. Hennessy dismissed Mr. Dooley's
fancy sketch with a grin and remarked:
These here expositions is a gran thing
f'r tn progress iv TIL wirruld"
'Ye r-read that in tn pa-apers," said
Mr. Dooley, Fan' it isn't so. Put it down
firm me, Hinnissy, that all expositions
is blind FIR tn hootcky- -kootchy dance.
They'll be some gr-reat exhibits at tn
Paris fair. TIL man that has a machine
that'n tur-rn out 30O.0GD toothpicks ivry
minyit II sind over his inthrestin' device,