davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
SOLDIERS LIFE EASIER.

Protection, Weapons and Food Much
Improved of Late Years.
Although soldering would seem to be
a more perilous business than 1t eve1
was before, in consequence of the
greater force, rapidity and range OF
weapons, and the higher power Of ex-
plosives, the result may show that mod.
ern battles are not more deadly than
were those Of the Civil War, since an
attempt has been made to counteract
the destructive forces by stouter pro-
tections In forts and by a system OF
tactics that replaces the old solid for.
nations with something like the skir-
mish order Of former times. It may be,
also. that the troops will fight at fur
ther distance, allowing for the longer
carriage of bullets and shells.
But Of one thing we are certain. If
the perils Of war have. been multiplied
the comforts Of the camp have been
increased until they are partial Offset.
Clothing is stOuter, IL the millers choose
to make 1t so: camp outfits include
cooking apparatus that can be carried
VA eA1S bhSh Va OhC Tic VI
meats. vegetables and fruits. the desic-
cation Of other articles Of food, and the
general cheapening Of many things that
were luxuries few years ago make 1t
possible to live In camp almost as in a
hotel. The substitution Of aluminium
for iron In utensils Is another advant-
age. and In general there is a tendency
to both lightness Of outfit and extension
Of properties contained in 1t.
In addition to the articles provided by
the government tn it's clothing and ra-
ton allowances, the man with a gun
Is now allowed to buy and have pipes
tobacco, soap, writing materials, pens,
basins, blacking brushes, silk handker-
CHIEFS matches, towels and an addition
to his menu in cheese, canned goods.
dried fruits, deviled ham, preserves,
white sugar. lime juice, worcestershire
sauce, pickles, jam, ginger, spices and
cranberry sauce. Rum Is discounte-
nanced In hot countries. for 1t encour-
ages sunstroke and intensifies other
troubles peculiar to the climate
Brooklyn Eagle.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
THE ART OF TALKING WELL.

Things to Say and Things to Leave Un.
said In General Conversation.
1t Is better to be frankly dull than
pedantic.
One must guard ones self from the
temptation Of talking shop and OF
riding ones "hobby."
Whatever sets one apart as a capital
''I' should be avoided.
A Joke, or humorous story is depen.
dent upon its freshness for apprecia.
ton. Some emotions will not bear
warming over.''
1t Is no longer considered good form
to say word against any one. An ill.
natured criticism is a social blunder
Gossip, too, is really going out of fash
ion.
True wit is gift, not an attainment.
Those who use it Alright never yield to
the temptation Of saying anything that
can wound another in order to exhibit
their own eleverness. 1t is natural and
spontaneous. "He who runs after wit
is apt to catch nonsense"
Talk that has heartfness In 1t and the
liveliness and sparkle that come of
light-heartedness and innocent gayety,
is a fairly good substitute for wit.
Offer to each one who speaks the
homage Of your undivided attention.
Look people in the face when you talk
to them.
Talk Of things, not persons. The best
substitute for wisdom is silence.
1t is provincialism to say "yes, sir, :"
mo, ma'am" to ones equal.
Have convictions Of your own. Be
yourself and not mere echo.
Never ask leading questions. We
should show curiosity about the con-
Germs of others only so far as it may
crafty them to tell us.
Draw out your neighbor without cate
chizing him. Correct him, II necessary,
without contradicting him. Avoid man
nerisms.
Strive to be natural and at ease. The
nervousness that conceals itself under
affected vivacity should be controlled,
as should the loud laugh.-Ladies'
Home Journal
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Dividend-Paying Mines.

The following is partial list of the
mines of British CO.
lumbia: Camp Mckinley paid up to
June, 1899, $312.964; the Fern, up to
June. 1898, $40, 900; the Hall Mines.
Limited, up to May, 1899, $120, 900;
the Idaho, up to January. 1899, $292,-
900; the Last Chance, up to April.
1899, $45, 1000; the LIE Roi. up to No
vember, 1899, $l,s05, 900; the Queen
Bess, up to July, 1899, $25, 900; the
Ramhler-Cariboo, up to Decem Der,
1890, 100000; the Reco, up to Janu-
ary, 1898, $297, 500, the War Eagle
Consolidated, up to February, 1900.
$545,250; the Ymir, up to November,
1899, $50, 900.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Came, Saw, and Was Conquered

A Scotch farmer, celebrated In his
neighborhood for his immense strength
and skill in athletic exercises, very fre.
quently had the pleasure of contendine
with people who came to try their
strength against his. Lord D., great
pugilistic amateur, went from London
on purpose to fight the athletic Scot
The latter was working in an Enclosure
at little distance from his home when
the mobile lord arrived. His lordship
tied his horse to tree and addressed
the farmer.
"Friend, have heard marvellous re-
ports of your skill, and have come a
long way to see which of us two is the
better wrestler"
The Scotchman, without answering,
seized the nobleman, pitched him over
the hedge, and then set about working
again. When Lord D. got up:
'Well," said the farmer, "have you
anything to say to me:"
NO." replied his lordship. "but per-
haps you'd be good enough to throw
me my horse!-Golden Penny.
Some people use religion as cloak
and some use II as an umbrella
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
DID NOT KNOW HER HUSBAND.
Chicago Dentist Fails to Convince q
Spinster She Was Married.

Chicago Dentist Fails to Convince a
Spinster She Was Married.
DIR. Fillum Is a dentist, and he prides
himself on remembering his patients
and the history of their molars as well
as any doctor in Chicago. The other
day a plump, blonde little woman sail
ed into the Office cheerfully.
II want to make an engagement to
have my teeth examined, DOCTOR" she
remarked, as IL she had been a patient
Of ten years standing.
"All right. How'll Saturday suit
your" inquired the doctor, all the time
making a strong mental effort to recall
her name.
"No-o,' she hesitated. II promised to
take the children to the country then,
and Mr.. Johns
"Of course; l recollect now. Your
husband was In while yesterday and
told me about It," interrupted DR.. Fill
lnm, joyfully recognizing the name Of
one of his patients.
mo, my husband wasn't here yes
terday," remarked the woman, with a
queer smile.
"Oh, yes he was, ma am, and filed
q tooth for him." insisted the doctor.
You never filed a tooth for my hus-
band in your life," said the little lady,
cycling him calmly.
my dear Mrs. Johns, Il"
"Who do you take me for, anyway 2"
Mrs. Johns, ma'am.'
"Well, I'm not; I'm Miss Angelina
Simms Of the Waits Mission, and you
made me set Of false teeth the year
before the Worlds Fair. Mr.. Johnson
Is the man who runs the mission I'm
In"
DIR. Fillum lost patient, but added
something to his store of human knowl-
edge.-Chicago Inter Ocean.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Copper In Uuiou County.

The copper fields in the eastern part
of Union county, Oregon, are likely to
become valuable property. Property
being worked by the North American
Mining Company shows ore bearing
gray copper in good quantities. Re-
ports say that great body of copper
ore exists in this section.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
The Terror of Hyderabad,

1t is on record that no fewer than
twenty-three persons were killed by
man-eating panther in the Ellichpore
district, Hyderabad, during the past
twelve months, says the Morning Post
Of Delhi. The brute remains at large,
despite the reward of 800 rupees Offer
ed for his capture.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
ENOUGH ORE FOR TEN YEARS
The Monte Cristo Company Will SooI
Employ More Men.

The Monte Cristo Company Will Soon
Employ More Men.
Monte Cristo, WASH, August a.
The Monte Critso Mining Company has
about so men on the pay roll. The
concentrator is using only one side of
the mill, handling 70 tons every "a
hours. Some repairs are being made
and when done the mill will run its
full capacity of 800 tons per day. The
dynamo will start up in few days,
then the Burleigh drills will be at
work. As soon as raise is finished,
so there will be more air and room, the
force will be increased to 400 or $50
men. 1t is claimed that the Monte
Crinsto Mining Company has enough
ore in sight to keep the mines working
for 10 years. A surveying party is at
work on a line to bring more water to
the mill.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Road to Blue River Mines.

Crews of men and teams have gone
from Brownsville, Oregon, to build the
wagon road from that place to the
Blue river mines. Relays of men will
be at work until the road is completed
to the mountains.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
A To.+ved EHac<

~ Jostled Effect.
Nan-Kitty, what does the new book
keeper look IikeP
Kitty-Well, he looks like man wLo
always had to put on his necktie while
running to catch train.-Indianapol
Journal.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
A Clear Case.

"What do you mean by saying music
injured your health?"
why that girl next door pounds her
piano so late that we have to go to bed
with all our windows shut"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Faith in Her WaYs.

"Cousin Dorothy's train gets in at
$50"
well. I'll be at the station at G:3O.',
''6:3O?'
"Yes; Dorothy is always an hour late
whatever she does."-Iife.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Jumpinc at Conclusion,

"Bagsley Is awfully fond of his new
parrot, isn't hep
"Yes, he takes him out to the golf
links every day."
Then that's where he's learning to
swear."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31

1t happens often these days that
Aunt Maria has to remember that
Marie was named for her, and that
Aunt Martha has namesake In Mar
tina
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
PACIFIC COAST TRADE.


Seattle Markets.
Onions, new, lAc.
. Lettuce, hot house, 81 per crate.
Potatoes, new. SIS.
Beets, per sack, S5c@$1.
Turnips, per sack, 75c.
Squash-4c.
Carrots, per sack, $I.00
Parsnips, per sack, $1.25.
Caulifiower, native, 75c.
Cucum umbers-10@20c
Cabbage, native and California,
&c per pounds.
Tomatoes-50@ @ CO..
Butter-Creamery.2 25c; Eastern 22c;
dairy, 15@1Sc; ranch, lac pound.
Eggs-24c.
Cheese-12c.
Poultry-12c; dressed. lac; spring,
13@15c. ..--.-.
Hay-Puget Sound timothy, $11.0C
@12.00; choice Eastern Washington
timothy, $1,000.
Whole, $as. 90; cracked, $a5;
feed meal, $s5.
Barley-Rolled or ground, per ton,
$40.
Flour-Patent, per barrel, $3.50;
blended 'straights, 1925; California,
1925; buckwheat -four, $500; gra-
ham, per barrel, So. 90; whole wheat
flour, 1926; rye -four, $S. 10000.
Millstuffs-Bran, per ton, $1,000;
shorts, per ton, $l4.00.
Feed-Chopped feed, $1,000 per ton;
middlings, per ton, $40; oil cake meal,
per ton, $4,000.
Fresh Meats-Choice dressed beef
steers, price INC; cows, &c; mutton
IN; pork, &c; trimmed, SC; veal, 9@
lie.
Hams-Large, l3c; small, 1871;
breakfast bacon, lac; dry salt sides.
4 1c. --.. -...--
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Oh, the Flatterer!

A Somerville young man is getting to
be very popular with the young ladies'.
When he meets one he says at the first
opportunity:
=; "Oh, by the way, I've got pretty
picture here that want to show you"
Then he takes little round mirror
out Of his pocket and holds it up for
her to look in it-Somerville Journal.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Oldest Miner.

Douglas county, Oregon, claims the
oldest miner, William Kerr, who is 9s
and works every day.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Good Idaho Mine Being Developed.

UOOu AuaNO nAlHo DelnG DeVoiOpeOs
The Kbndike mine, In the Pierce
City diIrict, Idaho is being developed
by t/nnels, and about 10000 tons of
ore have been blocked out. 1t will as
say about $S per ton. Fifteen men are
working on the new site for the mill
which will be put up at once. This
mine is owned by the Oro Fino Mining
Company.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Magnanimity,

Laundress-One O. my customers 'ad
the cheek ter compline as sheet come
'ome in four bits!
Sympathetic friend-Well, l never!
Wot did yer sye?
Laundress-Sed as I'd only charged
fer it as one harticle Sketch.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31

Macbeth and Meg Merrilies are con-
sidered among the best characterize
tons ever presented on the American
stage.
Though during her long stage career
Madame Janauschek has been in re-
ceipt of handsome salary, she is to-
day dependent upon the actors fund
tor sustenance.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Coal and Petroleum.

Several Astoria men have formed a
syndicate to develop coal lands near
that place. Petroleum is also expect.
sd to develop on this property.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Thirty Thousand a Month,

The Greenback mine, in Josephine
county, Oregon, pays it's owners $780,
OOc month in dividends.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Klondike Gold.

The yield of gold in the Klondik,
country this year is estimated at $16,.
600, 900.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Rushing to Dawson.

Navigation on the Yukon river closes
early in October and there is rush
of freight to the Dawson country.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Gold Output This Year.

Director of the Mint George E. Rob.
erts, estimates the worlds gold output
this year at $500, 000, ,000..
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Permanent Gold Veins.

Mining experts said in the Portland
Telegram, August 20, that they be.
lieved the gold veins In Eastern Oregon
are permanent and of good depth.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Growth of One INDUSTRY

In 1890 the United States had only
sixteen cement factories, while there
are Row thirty.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
San Franoisoe Market.

Wool-Spring-Nevada, 11@1Sc PEI
pound; Eastern Oregon, 10@14c; VAL
ley, 16@1sc; Northern, 90 IOc.
Hops-1s99 crop, ..11@13c PEI
pound.
+ Butter = Fancy creamery 24c;
do seconds, 22@23c; fancy dairy,
pc; do seconds, 17@ zoe per pound.
Eggs-Store, l7c; fancy ranch,
22c.
Millstuffs - Middlings, $17.00 a
1000; bran, $12.50@I3.5O.
Hay-Wheat $S@12; wheat; and
oat 5000 1850; best barley $500
alfalfa, $6.00@7.50 per ton; straw,
s5@371ac per bale.
Potatoes-Early Rose. 30@ 75c; Ore.
gon Burbanks, 9oc@$1; river Bur.
banks, 35@ 60c; new. l n @2c.
Citrus Fruit-Oranges, Valencia,
$2.75@3.25; Mexican lines, $4,000
500; California lemons 75c @$1. so;
do choice $1.75@2.00 per box.
Tropical Fruits-Bananas, $1.bO@
$50 per bunch; pineapples, nom.
inal; Persian dates. 6@61c Per
pound.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
OREGON COAL FIELDS.


The Geological Survey Publishes Late
Report on Them
Washington, August 27.-The coal
fields of Oregon are thus summarized
by the latest report of the geological
survey:
The coal fields of Oregon, so far as
yet known, all lie west of the Cascade
range and north of Rogue river. Most
of them are among the mountains gen.
orally known in Oregon as the Coast
range, but others occur at the western
foot of the Cascade range. Four fields
will be noticed-the upper Nehalem
coal field, in Columbia county; the
lower Nehalem coal fields. in Clatsop
county; the Yaquina coal fields, in
Lincoln county and the Coos Bay coal
fields, in Coos county. Traces of coal
have been fond in many other parts of
the state. The greatest hindrance to
the development of the Oregon coal
fields is the lack OF transportation.
Work Progressing the Kimberley.
The tunnel on the Kimberley, in the
Kamloops. B. c., district, is in 327 feet.
Last week a vein was struck on the top
of the tunnel, at pitch of 45 degrees.
Bunches OF very good ore have been
encountered, of ohalcopyrites and black
oxides. The present vein matter is
very much decomposed, but so far con-
siderably exceeds in value anything
hitherto taken from the tunnel. This
finishes the contract for the 100 feet OF
driving. Work is still in progress,
and will be prosecuted steadily.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Quartz Strike Near Detroi

Four quartz claims have been located
near Detroit, Oregon, during the week,
and the hills are being hunted for loca.
tioDs,
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
A Safety Clau

He-I think I'll eat a third slice of
watermelon.
She-So will 1.
He-No, you don't; If we both get SICK
who's to go for the doctor r?-Indianap-
oils Journal.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Sure Thing,

Edith would be willing to marry
the man loved even If he wasn't capa-
BILE of earning over $40 week.
Ethel-So would I! Such men as that
almost always come of rich and inf1u-
entail families!-Puck.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31

"Pa, out to gran'ma's we had real
hens eggs"
"Well. what other kind Of eggs are.
there, Dicky?'
why. pa, you said all til eggs we,
get in town are cold storage eggs
Indianapolis Journal.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
She Was Satisfiei 4.

CaptiOus MOther--What do you want
to marry that young man for? He
doesn't know enough to set the world
on fire.
Sensible Daughter-Maybe not, but
he says he knows enough to set the
kindling wood in the kitchen range on
ffre.-Somerville Journal
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Customer-How do you sell eggs?
Grocer-In the shells, mum!
A Iustified Pun.

"My mother-in-law has gone to the
mountains"
''You look pleased"
"Yes; she'll have to admit she has
found something that she can't walk
over" r."-Indianapolis Journal.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Sympathetic.

"Hen-ry," gasped Mrs. Peck, Il
w-wish you would go for the
doctor l c-can't hardly b-breathe.' -
Don't try, my dear, if it hurts you,
calmly replied Henry.-Chicago News.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31

Being Ounce Is the most expensive
habit you can possibly have.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31

"How absurd" remarked the cab
man, "for that man to swear merely
because he lost the train"
'But wouldn't you do the same thing
in his placer replied the gatekeeper.
very like" said the cabman; "but I
wasn't thinking of that. l was only
thinking how luckily for me it was that
he lost his train. He will have to hire
me to take him down town, don't you
seeT-Boston Transcript.
An Authority on China.
Husband-Pd like to know what Is to
become of China.
Wife-I guess the hired girl can tell
you.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Interrupted.

ELIZA, you'll never again get me out
at 4 o'clock to cut the grass"
David, 1 wanted you to do it before.
1t got hot
well, Eliza, it got hot in just three
minutes. l hadn't cut five strokes be-
fore the people on both sides of us
threw two bird cages and four alarm
clocks at me-"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Too Much of q TaIker for Him.

A young man in Pennsylvania broke
his engagement with a. girl because on
her graduation she took the oratorical
prize,
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Portland Nj Afket.

fOrCl0n0 Markell
Wheat - Walla Walla. 54@55c;
Valley, 55c; Bluestem, 5Sc per bushel.
Flour-Best grades, S.. 10; graham,
$3.O 90; superfne, So. 10 per barrel.
Oats-Choice white, SIC; choice
gray, 35c per bushel.
Barley-Feed barley, $l5.00@15.5O;
brewing, $1,000 per ton.
. Millstuffs-Bran, $1,000 ton; mid
dlings, $40; shorts, SIS; chop, SIS pei
ton.
Hay-Timothy, $11@12; clover, 81 q
7.50; Oregon wild hay, $6@7 per ton.
Butter-Fancy creamery, 45@5Oc;
store, 271ac.
j. Eggs-17c per dozen.
Oregon full cream, 13c;
Young America, 14c; new cheese 10c
per pound.
Poultry-Chickens, mixed, $1,000
400 per dozen; hens, $3.50; springs,
$2.0O@3.OO; geese, $5.O0@7.0O for old;
$4.50@6.50; ducks, $S.00@4.00 per
dozen; turkeys, live. 16@16c per
pound.
Potatoes-40@ SOC per sack; sweets,
2@2Ac per pouno.
Vegetables-Beets 81; turnips, 81;
per sack; garlic, 7c per pound; cab.
bage, &c per pound; parsnips, 81;
onions, nc per pound; carrots, 81.
Hops-2@8c per pound.
Wool-Valley, 16@16c per pound;
Eastern Oregon, 15@ 16c; mohair, 25
per pound.
Mutton-Gross, best sheep, wethers
and ewes, sac; dressed mutton, TO
TIC per pound; lambs, nc.
Hogs-Gross, choice heavy, $500;
light and feeders. 81. SO; dressed,
$5.0 q 6 80 per 100 pounds.
Beef-Gross, top steers, $4.O0@4.5O;
cows, $3.50@4.00; dressed beef, 6H q
7Ac per pound.
Veal-Large. 6H@7kc; small, SO
S1ac per pound.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31

"Our cook was going to leave yester-'
day, but my wife's diplomacy saved
the day"
"Is that so?'
eyes; when the cook gave notice, my
wife, with great presence Of mind, said:
That's too bad, Bridget, but I'm not
surprised. Several of the neighbors'
girls predicted that you would leave
because you knew you wouldn't have
any show with the handsome new po-
liceman who is shortly to be assigned
to this beat .'"-Philadelphia Press.
The Awakening.
Crawford-Did he learn anything by
visiting the Paris Exposition?
Crabshaw-Well, he found out that
he'd wasted a lot of money having his
daughters instructed in boarding school
French.-Judge.
Doesn't Know 1t All Now.
Higgins, I've come to you for ad-
vice. What ought man of my capa-
bilities and opportunities to do in or
der to achieve the greatest success In
life?"
"Gurney, wish you had come to me
with that question about five years ago.
1 could have told you all about it then.
was just out of college.
Tribune.
Always to Be Trusted.
+ Hoax-Is Hardluck the sort Of fellow
one could trust?
Joax-Well, if you trust him once
you'll trust him forever.-Philadelph
Record.
Had Given Up Trying.
Its strange" remarked the senti-
mental young Benedict, "how Fate
throws different people together. By
the way, how did you come to know
your wife?
Il DON'T" replied the old married
man, "and 1 never expect to."-Phila-a
delphia Press.
A Favorite with the Ladies.
"The census man was so kind; he
didn't ask me how old l was"
"He didn'tv'
"No; he just asked me what year
was born in."-Chicago Record
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
Menta1 Effort In July.

"You are very quiet tonight, Char
lotte."
Eyes; / read something to-day, and |
wanted to talk to you about It, but 1
can't think what it was"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31
A tTsc fin, Song.

"What shall sing, Clarence:'
"Sing that. lovely old-time song,
'Lorena'
''Oh, see; you're fixing to get good
long nap"
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31

Sod the Same Old Way.
Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Benton County, Or.) 1900-1909, 1900-08-31

Some people use religion as cloak
and some use 1t as an umbrella.