Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1900-11-16

Ease writhed under the knowledge
that people thought | was sailing with
Tie wind, and 50 ON.
"'Nou run with the hare and hdht
with the hounds. don't YOU: "a giIl 81 ii
To me last week. and. mean as she was.
/ understood just how she thought Al
was true. And yet was only follow
ing out the dictates of my abnormal
Conscience ana trying To he just.
Another girl last week asked me IL
the powder on her face showed, and
when | said yes she fairly hated me.
My conscience didn't allow me 10 say
no. and it never occurred To me until
long aftcrward that | might have
pleasantly brushed off the powder for
her which did show and left the pow
der which didn't show alone without
saying anything ut all. TWO days ago
my brothers wife asked me what
thought of her complexion, ana be-
cause my conscience compelled me 10
tell her the truth she went home with
out bidding me good night or speaking
to mo again. She hasn't spoken 10 me
since, in fact. And things have gone
on after this fashion until | am tired
of il.
when Robert Elsmere' first came
out it was Il point of conscience with
me not to read it. and every one called
me saint and 'prig' until life was a
weary burden. \ week or two ago
| a Il.f ..,g;t ;t
cured to me that it was Il point of
conscience not to condemn thing I'M
read. The consequence was that SUI
| ferch tOrtures on account of diSlOcatCd
religious principles for Il whole week.
! Then it occurred to me that ii was
point of conscience not to let anything
shake my faith or interfere with my
religious stability, and that particular
conscience trouble gave way to an
other | always have one or more on
hand, as you know"
did know. | never knew Olivia
when she didn't have Il whole sheaf of
such trials and fluctuations on hand.
| was dying to hear all about the last
new conscience wrench, and she would
not come TO the point. | did not dare
to hurry her for fear of never hearing
of il at all.
"When my friends and relatives make
fun of Delsarte exercises or the new
est form of athletics. my relentless
conscience always impels me to try
these things personally. just so that
can discuss them intelligently and
without prejudice. In consequence I'm
seldom without backache or a sprain-
ed muscle or something equally pleas
ant Let politician, a private mdi-
vidual, a cause or anything else, for
that matter. become unpopular. and
my tyrannical conscience compels me
to champion it or him or them. AS a
result half the people | know are con-
tinually writing me down as a miser-
ably disputatious and disagreeable per-
SON"
Which was putting the matter entire
ly too strong. But then that's Olivia's
way. It's Il point of conscience with
her to make the worst of herself for
fear she should be untruthfully com
plimentary.
Its always been So" she moaned
now. beginning to sob a little, but
now it's worse than ever. Now
IF you don't come out with it now"
broke in. unable to restrain my impa-
thence much longer, 81 shall go stark,
staring, raging. raving mad and either
kill you or myself Now
"Now," said Olivia, breaking down
utterly and crying as though her heart
would break. now Charley and Harry
have both proposed to me. They did it
a month ago. | put them both on pro
baton because | liked them both, and
it was point of conscience with me
to treat them both just alike and fairly,
although | can't help saying that
really like Harry a little bit the better,
and now they both accuse me of tlrt-
ing. and neither of them will speak
to me at all. And it's all because my
unfortunate conscience won't let me
alone"
"Well. dearie. there's one recompense
anyhow | volunteered cOnsolingly
when | had comforted her by promis-
ing to set matters right with the one
she liked little bit the best" "Peo.
pie can't help respecting any one who's
so intensely conscientious and so very
much in earnest about it as you are"
ooh. | don't know about that" re-
torted Olivia. relapsing into modified
condition of gloominess again. 81
don't know about that at all. OF
course, the men who like you say that
sort OF thing to your face very often
but they're great deal likely to call
you a silly little priggish idiot behind
your back, and the girls one knows
don't even pretend to respect one
They simply say you're a miserable
contemplate little prig to try to be sc
much better than other folks and that
you make everybody uncomfortable
about you and let it go at that No
there isn't much comfort in being more
conscientious than other people, and
sometimes wonder if the best people
in the world, as well as the happiest
aren't the people who have only just
, enough conscience to keep them rea
sonably honest and kind and not toe
big an allowance to live comfortably
!, with"
And really, despite the fact that ]
firmly believe ironcad consciences tc
be necessary. in great numbers. to the
proper conduct and salvation of this
gay and sinful but altogether adorable
world. at least in this present day anf
generation, it seemed to me that Olivta
=, had either proved her case or some
thing very like. I don't in the least
know how to reconcile the two aspects
tla IL L.