davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1900-09-01

Tic quickest Cure for Dysentery.
have had occasion TO test the merits
of Chamberiain's Collie. Cholera and
Diarrhoea Remedy in a bad case of
dysentery. which Was speedily relieved
and permanently cured by one half the
contents of small bottle of that rem
eiy. 1t ls the quickest remedy known to
~. II. Ables, Ponchatoula, La. For
sale by druggists. 81
To prevent consumption quickly cure
throat and lung troubles with One Min
ute Cough Cure. All druggists
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
PueNAcIoUs RELIGION.

Rev Joshua jeremiah AxtelI Of
Royal Oak, Mich. has accepted an in
vitation of Mayor Maybury Of Detroit
to spar for sweet charity" AS the
fighting parson Won some aotoriety by
humping a saloon keeper OF his parish
two or three weeks ago. MARQUIS Of
QueensbeETy rules, he viii doubtless
prove a. drawing card for the philan-
thrOpic entertainment to be given under
the auspices Of the municipal govern
ment Of Detroit.
The pugiHstic preacher challenged
the saloon keeper and scandaIized his
congregation, it is said, because the
dispenser Of slow poison undertook TO
break up a revival and run the sky
pilot out of town. But AxteH preferred
to continue preaching and promised to
refrain from hammering the gospel into
the ungOdly. and 50 demurred when
asked 10 box at the benefit.
Finally, however, he yielded TO the
opportunities Of Mayor Maybury. and.
perhaps. to a secret desire for more
physical exercise than pounding the
pulpit afforded, and his name is on the
programme.
4 refuse to appear as a profession
al he says. and do this for charity
and because I believe in the upbuiIding
OF the human race rather than merely
uplifting men
At all events. it seems that he be-
ieves in knocking men down before he
essays the uplifting feat
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
EzRA THoMpsoN,s - FoRM

There must be some hitch in the
machinery Of the universe. The new
city administration has been in power
five days and no effort has been made
TO rescue the city from the periss which
surrounded It in the heat Of the city
campaign
There We're microbes marching down
the dry bed Of ParIey's creek, ten nil
lion strons-armed baciri singing BAG
chanalian songs and whetting their
fangs upon the Hmestones Of the can
yon, bent upon making a meal Of the
10000 inhabitants of this doomed city.
hanson stin threatens to run he sa-
cred Jordan to suit his profane pur-
poses just as he did in the days Of a
former Republican administration. The
streets abound in mud, as they used
to in wet weather, ana there isn't any
change in the climate or the general
course Of the moon.
But there is a hitch somewhere.
Otherwise does any one imagine for an
instant that Mayor Thompson would
let grass grow under his feet or snow
fan on his head until a force Of men
were dispatched with Geddes as u
guide to the headwaters Of the Par
ley?
Then, Mr. Thompson and his agents
promised the people Of the Eighteenth
ward a new schoolhOuse in return for
yote9-tO be erected without expense. to
ohe taxpayers on the site Of the present
city water station.
As the removal of this portion Of the
Waterworks to some other par Of the
city might have involved some expense.
but for the campaign pledges of Mr..
Thompson and his official mouthpiece,
the people are naturally little impa-
tient for him to begin before he changes
his mind about it.
1t is inexplicable why the mayor
hasn't begun his promised reforms ere
this.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
Entertaining Sisters Beau.

0eslie's Weekly.)
My sisters beau's a Teller at mos any
He's orful good T. me, an once he let me
ride his bike.
He'd lef it standin' by the gate ont
side, an I got on
An NAV lit into scOldin', but he took nv
part, dOggonei
He said | wouldn't hurt it, an I didn't
neither-Sayi -
But Amt it mean to scold a bov fore COM
p ny that away?
My tops an balls he looks at. an nv For
Good Boy cup.
When I'm a-entertainin' him while sis is
dressin' up.
He's jes' wrapped up in furrin stamps.
pOStmarkS an tin tags, too;
L showed him mine. an ne jes' looked. nv
WhUl collection through.
He says he ''dotes" on bird eggs. an he
handles EN- as if
He knOwed 'ey'd break like ev'rything if
once 'ey got biffl
An, say, he listens to me when I tell him
things on sis
Bout her last beau. ies' fore him. an
how I seed EN- kiss!
The ,, feller; Ia laglghin,, says; "Oho, Of
When I'm a-entertainin' him while sis is
dessin' I'D.
Men. sis she comes downstairs. with
face as fair as any saint"
I heard him say softlike to her-he doesn't
know it's paint
I'm most afeard to tell him, though I
want to mighty bad,
An 'usn't right to fool him. Geo. he tells
such bully things
OF shOOtin' bears an catermounts an all
such scary things;
An me an him talk everything, from
pOrkypine to pup,
When I'm a-entertainin' him while sis is
dressin' up.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
COMING CENTURY FIGURES.

A correspondent writes from Rock
Springs to inquire: "WiH the Christian
era be 1901 years old on Dec. 81, 1902"
No. As The Herald has already ex-
planned, the century VIII end on the
date given and the Christian era VIII
be exactly 1900 years old, as we reckon
time.
On the S1st day Of December, in the
year 100 A. D. the era Of Christianity
was leo years old. AT the close Of every
hundredth year thereafter another CEN
fury was added TO the era.
Another correspondent. writing from
Pocatello, wants to know "the exact
time when the twentieth century be-
gins" It opens Immediately after mid
night of the date given-in other words.
it begins with the first second of the
first minute Of the first hour of the first
day Of January, 1901.
Subscriber" writes from Park City
to ask upon what weekdays the next
century will open and close. 1t viii
have Tuesday for the first and Sunday
for the last daI.
While answering queries upon this
topic it may be as well to state for the
benefit Of elderly unmarried females
and bashful bachelors who may live
through the next century as well. that
it viii contain as many leap years as
it IS possible for any century to have,
the figures of the closing year being
Invisible by 500
Is there anything else?
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
SOCIETY NOTES.

Mr.. and Mrs. James T. Jennings
gave a brilliant reception and dance
last evening at their handsome Brig
ham street residence.
The entire house. which is admirably
arranged for entertaining, was thrown
open and deliberately decorated Tor the
occasion. The lower floor was done in
green and was most artiStically ar
ranged. Tall palms were banked
about the walls in the drawing room,
while festoons Of smilax draped the
man+el and dOOrways. The library ana
dining room were used for dancing,
both rooms being decorated in sim
liar fashion tu the drawing room, with
groupings of palms and plants. The
eIectroliers were covered with smliaX
and the doorways were arched with
festoOns of the same.
Behind a screen of palms in the re-
ception hall was stationed Christen-
sens full orchestra, which furnished
delightful programme Of concert and
dance music.
The billiard room on the second floor
was used as a dining room, and here
an elaborate buffet supper was served
The table was arranged in colors of
pink and green. A runner Of Batten-
berg over pink was used, while the
center was formed Of carnations ana
feathery chrysanthemums. Ropes or
smilax radiated over the cloth, while
the effect was heightened by myriads
Of candles cleaning through rose
colored shades.
Miss frankie Sharp presided over the
punch bowl. which was arranged on a
prettily decorated table in the dining
room.
Among those who enjoyed the hos
pitality Of Mr.. and Mrs. Jennings were
Mr.. and Mrs. w. V. Rice, Judge and
Mrs. Goodwin, DR.. and Mrs. Whitney,
Mr. and Mrs. Elgin Travis, Mr.. and
Mrs w. p. Jennings, Mr.. and Mrs j.
Y. Sharp. Mr. and Mrs. Caspar L.
Robertson Mr.. and Mrs W. Sharp, Mr.
and Mrs. Caine, Mr.. and Mrs. Van
Colt, Mr. and Mrs. r. ]. Glendinning,
Mr. and Mrs. D. G.. Dunbar, Mr.. and
Mrs. William Reid. Mr.. and Mrs. ". T.
DfnWOOdey. Mr. and Mrs. 2 ]. Fabian,
Mr. and Mrs. J. Z. Chapman. Mr.. and
Mrs. Sam G. Park, Mr.. and Mrs. j. II.
Young, DR.. and Mrs. Daily. Mr. and
Mrs. J. II. Moyle. Mr.. and Mrs. Victor
Clement, Miss Sharp. Miss Savage,
Miss Lunt, Miss Clark, Misses HoWat,
Miss Park. Miss Young. Misses Shear
man. Miss Anderson, Miss Read, Miss
Frankie Sharp, Miss Lowe, Mrs. w. {.
Jennings, Mrs Hanford Mrs. Fergu-
son, Mrs. William Jennings, Governor
II NJ Wells. Mr.. w. D. Ritter, Mr.. Ell
Ierbeck. Mr.. Edgar Hills Mr.. D. II.
Wells. Mr.. ". !. Lawrence, Mr.. G. ;.
Price. Mr. +. G. Schramm, Mr. W H
Shearmaa, Mr.. Richard ColbuTn.
Mr.. and Mrs. Fred Noble are in the
city, visiting members Of TIER family.
9 @ 9
Mrs. Hoffman has invitations out for
cards next Wednesday afternoon
@ q y
Mrs Cowan entertains tomorrow in
honor Of the children
q q =
The wedding Of Mr.. John E. IcKen-
drick end Miss Nellie Smith, two high
/ y respected young people Of Sugar,
viii take place in the Salt Lake ten2
pie on jan 10. wedding reception
viii follow in the evening at the res
dence OF the brides parents. Mr.. and
Mrs James r. Smith, in Sugar ward.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05

system and realize that there was
something false in that too.
In spite Of these unpropitious begin
nings. and in spite Of the malign in
huence OF the back-stair politician dur
ing the reign Of Andrew jackson"
those eight years had much that was
good in them Though the president
was hOtheaded and iniudicious on oc-
casions, he was thoroughly honest,
thoroughly patriotic, thoroughly de-
voted 70 the good Of the country as he
saw it, Historians have been won't to
lament his attack upon the Bank Of
the United States and We certainly
cannot justify his high-handed and i'm
periou9 methods il dealing with fnan-
Cial matters. But, after all, Biddle and
his bank are comparatively unlmport-
ant. AS the years go by and we get
a more distant view of those times. we
see that the frondersman from Tennes-
see represented strong American sem
timent, that his famous proclamation
against the nulE6ers-w hoover may
have written twas a great and lnilu-
entail public document, that 10y taking
a bold stand against the theories of Sc
cesStOn and of dissolution he Impressed
his party with sentiments u union,
that we owe him a very great debt OK
gratitude for his famOl Is toast-"Our
Federal Union; 1t Must Be Preserved"
And il there were disorder and some
lawlessness in those vulgar Jackson
days" he was not the cause; his cleo
ton was the result Of a popular up-
heaval his administration was time
of great intellectual activity, a period
in which the democratic sentiment was
finding new expression He was him
self. a conspicuous expression OF a new,
alert, energetic. fOrceful. assertive spir-
il which was characteristic of American
life and was now dominant in Amerl-
can politics.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
HAS BROKEN HIS SILENCE.

Senator Beveridge has revealed the
hidden mystery of his heart. de has
preserved a silence so profound since
his escape from the Chinese Iaborers
around Manila that his party associates
had begun to take alarm. As IN 5x-
PLANTATION of his unfathomable secret
iveness. it was said that he had con-
Guided to remain silent with becoming
mOdesty for a couple Of months at least
after his advent as a statesman. But
those who said so reckoned without
their host
Beverage could not remain silent If
he would, and ne would not if ne coulC
He has. therefore, resolved that VIII
liam Mckinley is king Of the Philip
pines, and announced that he will de-
liver his Philippic-ine Grafton next
Tuesday. if the gallery is full and the
box Office receipts will justify him in
so doing.
As It is to be the Effort OF His Life.
there viii be, in al probability, a
gOOdly audience on hand to witness the
debut Of this Great Young Man.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
The ozAR IS PLEASED.

The official organ OF the Russian for
eign Office expresses the qualification or
the cars government that all the
powers have signed the peace agree
nent adopted at The Hague. So says a
St Petersburg dispatch
When every warlike power agrees to
never fight again, each sends its war
ships Ger the seas and musters in
more men. With problems here at
home unsolved. we leave this CONT
nent and take our guns and go. r.
solved to rule the Orient And Johnny
Bull, whose lands increase on every
oceans shores, would crush to ever
lasting peace the wild and woolly
Beers. IT'S thus the leading advocates
Of peace would make it sure, they'd
Danish all unruly states and keep their
peace secure.
The Turks still slay the AIoslem foe.
We leave them quite alone; it is 50 far
for US TO go, and we've troubles Of our
own Mahommed's minions conquer
Greece, Armenia pleads in vain; the
sultan has his views Of peace-and we
cannot complain The French are mad
and want 10 fght-they did not at
Fashoda-bat they have since dis
PLAYED their might in some Chinese pa
CODA The Russian bear stiIl prOwls
around the desert OF Cobb, hungry for
every bit Of ground from there to the
Yellow sea. The car still locks with
greedy eve upon the fool Chinese.
whose only friends beneath the sky
are the little japanese.
Austria would fight. and Germany
waits for the drop Of a warlike hat;
all have their eyes on the United States.
with Spain hors du combat And
thus il is they keep the peace and en-
force arbiuation-from Britain great
10 little Greece, and every other na-
zion
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
The Teachers Dream.
ALBANY IonrraIN

tAlbany JournaI)
vas saturday night. and a teacher sat
So 5Aio .i.s, her task pursuing.
@, VI all her class we're doing: ''-'-'
one Ieckoned percentage. so many bo,-e
ana 50 many girls all Counted
anu marked all the tardy and absences
ana 20 what al the absent amounted
Names and residence wrote in ful
D-ONeI many columns and pages.
Aahkee, Teutonic. African. Celt,
ana averaged all their ages:
Inc cate Of admission of every ono
and cases of flagellation.
AIld prepared a list of graduates
FOR the coming examination.
Her weary head sank low on. her boo1,
ana ner weary heart still lower.
I OF some OF her pupils had little brain.
and she could not furnish more
one sIept, she dreamed; it seemed she
And her spirit went to Hades
ana tney met her there with a question
State what the per cent of your grade
Ages had slowly rolled away.
Leaving but partial traces
Ana the teachers spirit walked one day
In the old familiar places.
A mound of fossilzed school reDorts
Attracted her observation,
As hign as the state house dome, and as
wide 20
As BoStUl and annexation.
She came to the spot where they buried
her bones
And the ground was well built over.
But IabOrerS digging threw out a skull
once. planted beneath the clover,
disciple Of Galen wandering by.
Paused to look at the diggers.
And picking the skull up, looked thro' the
eve.
And saw it was lined with figures
Just as I thought" said the young
NJ. D.
How easy it is to kill EN-
Statistics Ossified every fold,
Of ceTebrum and cerebeIlurn"
1t $ curiosity, sure said Pat
BY the bones can you tell the crea-
ture2''
"oh. nothing strange" said the doctor
that
Was a nineteenth century teacher"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
RHYMES OF THE DAY.
The Rhyme Of he Ancient Argus.

The Rhyme Of the Ancient Arguer.
therbert Henshaw in New York sun.l
II is an ancient arguer.
..I 5Ati1 ne st0ppeth a college youth
Dy lny long gray beard ard glittering
What's up thy sleeve forsoothY,
The ia fact is this" the ancient said.
- want your company
Next week, old man, to celebrate
Inc twentieth century,
In ne, youth. he grasped the skinny hand
.sv lGu r TQshlng things. Guoth he.
10u We got TO wait another year
for the twentieth century"
me ancient, anlesent's eye cleaned stin more
His, head was fun Of thought
LOOK mere, my friend. let me expIain
Jan l. hrst year, was naught."
The youth; he sat with stolid face,
he could not choose but hear
Inc Dlaintive tale of centuries
Aii1 that poor long lost year.
At last he made a break and said:
our argument was logical
But Il put up the mon. -
Then quoth the ancient arguer.
"a right game sport was hel.
i bet thou and I suggest
We write to Wellesley
ITS done, = replied the simple youth,
tAlI innocence was he)
And yet l hate to take YOU I'D
Upon certainty
Alas; alaek the Wellesley style
He did not well divine.
ne WORD came back: The century ends
~ MS gray beard and giittering eyer
Now swore the ancients friend
5e gets no thousand out of me-
III have some slight amend. -
And he argued thus:
II naught was the first year A. D..
Inen naught was the first century.
Ana the century closing with this year
Is tho eighteenth. Moneys mine. you
hear?"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
rAYLgR's PART IN The PLAY

Chairman Tayler Of the Roberts in
QUESTION has demonstrated how mar
row he Is and how unfair he deems it
necessary TO be in filing the role to
which. in defiance Of every rule Of JUS
tfoe. Speaker Henderson assigned him
The chief accuser Of the congress-
man-eIect. ne was selected as the pre-
siding judge Of the commission which
was created to hear the accusation and
pass upon the defense. Common de-
ceney would have impeled a lover Of
Justice to decline to serve as prosecutor
and chief Of the tribunal at the same
time. But common decency and Repre-
sentative Tayler are not on speaking
terms, It seems.
Chairman Tayler permitted a witness
TO go upon the stand some time ago,
and, by false and foolish statements,
to put The Herald in a false light.
Documentary evidence to fmpeach his
testimony was offered to the commits
sion, but the Associated Press dis
patches printed this morning show that
the chairman refused to admit the doc
Bments
This is a fair indication Of the IN
fairness expected Of Representative
Tayler when he was appOintcd-an ex-
pectation which viii doubtless be re-
allied It is his part in the play. Nor
can anything else be expected Of a
man who ignores the constitution, over
rides all precedents and violates the
law. in order to impress upon others
the majesty Of the law and the neces-
sity Of Obeying It.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
Scowlin' Bill.
Bismarck Tribune

Bismarck Tribune)
KnOwed him nigh on twenty year;
Never seen him smile.
Sour as green persimmons, sir.
All tn blessed while.
Face got set when he was young,
On tn Sowing track:
Lived for f0rty-seven year.
Never got it back.
Teller took a shot at him,
Up tn pearly stair
He ambled course we buried him,
Didn't much care where
Double-decked EN- sometimes when
Tn ground was frozen hard,
An Scowlin' Bill was planted with
Another defunct pard.
Nigh on ten year afterward,
(Bill was clean forgot.)
Brother wrote from way back east,
Said he had lot
In an eastern plantin' place;
Asst us for to pack
Scowiin Bill for shipment an
To forrud his bones back.
We was diggin' up the grave,
SDeculatin' hard,
How TO tell which one was Bill
An which one was BilPs pard.
Lanlky jim dug up some bones;
OuHit III dithtttAC Ole
Of Us alluded to EN- as
A grinning skeleton.
Problem solved" says Lanky jim,
An we asst him why.
Easy uuff." says Lanky Jim,
Making tn dirt fly.
Asst him then how he could tell;
Easy s sin," says jim;
''If this here one is GRIMM, why
Tn other must be him.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05

And We cannot more than mention his
invasion of Florida and the victories
Of the Seminole war QS1S). IN all
places where there was need Of force
ful, unhesitating action, where difficult
ties were TO be overcome by sheer de-
termination and unrelenting purpose,
he always showed unusual capacity,
as we'll as surprising vigor and skill, in
managing, or, rather, commanding his
subOrdinates-
Jackson was put forward as a candi-
date for the presidency in 1924. His OPP
pOnents were Henry Clay, John Quincy
Adams and William II. Crawford. That
his name should be mentioned at all
may seem strange enough, but It is
stranger still that he should have re-
ceived more electoral votes than any
one Of the others. Inasmuch as none
of the candidates received a majority
of the electoral college. the choice from
the highest three devOlved upon the
house. Clay's name did not go to the
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05

but now in the name of common sense
he is able TO reconcile himself = the
fact that the American eolOnists wrest-
ed their freedom from King George is
inexplieable,
IF Mr., WashbUrn Hopkins IS right
We were wrong in ordering England cut
Of Venezuela. If Imperialism is right
the Monroe doctrine is a mistake.
If Mr. Hopkins is right the Savior Of
mankind made his sacrifice in vain and
the parable of the Coed Samaritan has
no application in the affairs of nations
or individuals
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
THE MORALITY OF MIGHT.

Washburn Hopkins has written an
article in the Forum in which he con-
cedes. doubtless, for the sake Of argu-
mert shat the Beers are right that
England holds today no suzerainty
over the republic: that even what she
claims 10 hold does not entitle her to
demand what she requires OF the Boo $;
that the war is in reality Of her own
making; that it is a conflict she has
forced upon d free people, and that she
has forced 1t FOR her own advantage"
Yet he holds that there is a higher
morality" This is the benefit derived
b. the weak from the rule Of the
strong. He says:
Even Poland and ireland win have to
aduiL this hereafter, as Brittany can
admit 81 today. is there not mere a cOUn-
ffrlaTL in the moral world 30 the iuflex-
ible severity or physical laws, whereby
the maintenance of the race IS uDheTd an
The sacrifice OF iudiViduals2 in the end
a. far as man IS concerned. the survival
Of the t-ttest IS tne success Of the most
civilized.
An our sympathy for Ireland. Poland.
Finland, for weaker. peoples struggling
for independence everywhere has been
wasted. it seems NJ Washburn Hop
kin3 has discovered that strong powers
have q higher moral right TO hold. to
subiugate. to rule. than weaker ones
Save TO struggle fO- independence, OF
to aspire TO self government He says
further.
hold no brief for England; but while
size serves Cod and man I rejoice ia her
ffTumnhs. For God is served when man is
i.stte-red. and wherever England has taken
nor stand man has been bettered This is
fls ease in India. This IS true of EgypI.
ii Il true Of the many little lands She
5,rlfa round tre earth It VIII De proved
aaafn ia Africa WhEn Boer authority
Yields 10 her higher civilization.
He may hold no brief for England.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
Shattered Hopes.

An amusing story, somewhat at the ex-
pense of the author of Richard Carvel,
is just now going the rounds. An old man
seeing the picture Of Winston Churchill
displayed in the window of a Baltimore
bookseller, inquired of q bystander what
it represented. Winston Churchill" was
the reply. where does he preach?'- Be
ing told that Mr.. Churchill Was rot a
preacher, he asked: Amt he? What did
you say his name is2'' Winston Church
i'm. He writes novels. Does What?"
Writes novels" The man shook his head
with a look Of pity. ard declared. "Too
bad, too badl He has good face
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-01-05
The Dav of Battle

From "As Shropshire Lad A. E. Hous-
NAM
Far I hear the Dugle blow
To call me where / would not 60,
And the guns begin the song.
Soldier, fly or stay for long.
Comrade. if to turn and fly
Made a soldier never die.
Fly / would for who would not2
It's sure no pleasure to be shot,
But since the man that runs away
Lives TO die another day.
And towards funerals. when they come
Are not wept 50 well at home,
Therefore. though the best is bad,
Stand ard do the the best, my lad:
stand and fight and see your slain,
And take the bullet in your br-fn