Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1900-11-22
i.....-i...
THE MINISTER'S
FILTRATION.
--BY M. QUAD.
COPYRIGHT. 1900. BIZ c. 3. LEWIS.

*..-. ~. -. -. -. -. -. ~. -. X
The Rev. George Peters Of the First
Presbyterian church Of Homerville was
young man of about %. 1t was his
first call, but 1t was agreed that his
sermons were the best ever delivered
before that congregation. He was also
popular in social way, and, taken all
young ministers could boast of. When
he had been in Homerville six months,
he had made just two enemies. These
were an old maid named Angelina Har-
ris and her father. Neither was an open
enemy, but Angelina was piqued and
provoked and somewhat imbittered be-
cause the minister had kept clear of
the matrimonial net she would have
thrown about him. She would have
been willing to make a match of it
with almost any one, but it was the
ambition of her soul to marry q clergy
man. She struck the young reyerend's IS
trail at an early date, and she followed
it with ardor and persistency until he
was obliged to give her the cold snub.
AS she was one of his flock, and as her
father was a would be pillar Of the
church, the snub wasn't ice cold or full
of carpet tacks, but he made his mean
ing plain nevertheless.
From that hour Angelina Harris had
it in mind to do that good man up. She
didn't give her hand away by throwing
out little slurs and innuendoes, because
she would have found no one to listen
to her, but she set herself to watch and
bide her time. He who watches and
bides finds an opening sooner or later.
AS Angelina was keeping tab on cur
rent events a widow named SIoreland
moved to Homerville from Chicago.
She was young, rich, yivacious and
took her place at the head of society
at once. She occupied house exactly
opposite the one in which the minister
lodged, and it was also next door on
the left TO that occupied by Mr.. Har-
ris. She hadn't got settled yet when
Angelina made up her mind that her
cue was to watch for something be-
tween the new arrival and the minis
ter, she sized the widow up for hirt,
and, though she had never seen the
Rev. Peters indulge in anything of the
kind there was no telling what he
might do If coaxed on by designing
woman.
A couple of weeks had passed when
one hot afternoon the Chicago widow
sat down at an open window to read
and fan herself. She hadn't been there
ten minutes when the Rev. Peters sat
down at one of his second story win
dows to do the same thing. The wild
ow didn't see him, and he didn't see
the widow, but Angelina saw them
both. She saw the widows fan waved
In q way that said, "Glad to see you" I"
and the reply was waved back, "Many
thanks" Then the Widows fan began
an outrageous Irritation, and the min
ister's fan kept company with it, and
even when she waved that she thought
she could love him for himself alone he
wasn't driven off the field. The snub-
bed girl had watched and bided, and In
a day or two a social thunderclap shook
the town.
The father of Angelina, would be
pillar. etc, had not found the Rev.
Peters as clay in his hands, as he had
hoped for, and his effort to run
things connected with the church to
suit his own ideas had not proved sue
cessful. He had put up with defeat
as meekly as possible, but, like Ange-
lima, he was on the watch and the
bide. That his only child and favorite
daughter should have failed to make
a sentimental impression was another
thorn in his side, and a smile of salts
faction lighted his face as she called
him to witness the last five minutes Of
the Irritation. With his own eyes he
saw those fans working as if driven
by steam power. He wasn't a man to
stand anything of that sort even If he
hadn't had a grievance. He drew the
playing croquet and thought he was
overliberal at that. Within day he
and Angelina had taken care that about
80 different members of the church had
been posted on the Irritation. 1t is
needless to say that people were dunn
founded and that the Rev. Peters wab-
bIed about and almost fell down in a
faint when he heard the gossip. AS
for the Widow Moreland, she was more
than astonished, but of course she had
TO giggle over it. When the elders Of
the church doubted the sanity of An
gelina's father in spreading such a
yarn, he vigorously replied:
"I'll show you whether I'm crazy or
mott Call meeting of the yestry, and
/ win be there to make my statement
and prove it! When l see a Irritation
with my own eyes, l guess | know 1t
from a load of coaly'
meeting of the elders was called
1t had to be- The minister wanted it
as we'll as Mr.. Harris. When all was
ready to take up the charges, it was
Elder Spooner who asked In his slick,
suave way:
''Now, Brother Harris, how long
since you fiirted with woman?"
Never in all my lifer' was the indig-
nant answer