Hutchinson gazette., 1900-08-09
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FATE OF THE PRACTICAL JOKER. !


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One of the most notorious practical
jokers In the tribe of commercial tray.
elers had II rough journey Of IL from
Washington to Chicago not long ago.
He Is Il diamond salesman, aud the
unique jobs he has been putting up on
his friends OF the road during the past
twenty years and more are often told
about In the progress of the smolclng
car reunions mdconyersuDlons among
the knights OF the grip. A few weeks
ago he met three OF the old-tImers,
In different lines, In Washington, and
he found that they were all bound for
Chicago, Os he was, 80 they started to-
gether, says the Washington Star. His
three companions got together before
the start and studied out ways and
means whereby they could make the
practical ioker's trip with them joy
Ous and unusual
They all left on the afternoon trmln,
TO which two sleepers were attached.
Two OF the drummers had berhs In
one car and two in the other When
night drew on the three took Ndyuntr
age of the temporary absence of the
practical joker 10 herd the two por-
ters of the sleepers up In corner and
say something to them.
"This man we're WITH" the spokes-
man said TO the two porters, "is In
bad health and his mind hOs become
somcWhututiected, WeOre taking him
TO sOnllarlum In Chicago for trent
Lent We've been watching him prct-
~ closely for some days now, so that
we wan, 10 get a good nights sleep,
This friend OF ours, whose head Is a
bit wrong, isn't violent at ALL so long
MS he takes his medicine every half
hour, day and night, II he misses his
medicine however, he Is liable to do
someone injury, We want you two
porlcrs to take turns waking him up
for his medicine every half hour, Here
Is The medicine said the spokesman,
as he handed the porters black de-
section that looked like ink. "And
here rs u Sj nOtc that YOU can split
up between YOU for waking him up
frt his medicine, We win attend to
him up to the time he goes to bed,
but you two want 10 wake him up
every half hour durlg the night and
tell him quietly bwI firmly that N is
time for him to take his medicine. lie
may kick and cuss and tear aud rear
around, but never you mind that He
doesn't know that he Is u bit oi his
base, and he is not responsible for
what he says or does, Now, have you
got all that down."
"Ycssuh,' said the two grinning
portcrs, and the job was arranged.
The practical joker returned shortly
alterward and joined the thee, dliss-
fully unconscious Of the scheme that
had been concocted for his special
benefit lie was the first to begin tn
stretch andyawnund dannoun ce that he
had better turn in, and then the party
broke up each man making for his
berth,
The man who had been putting up
practical Jokes on his friends during
the greater part of his life was PRETTY
tired and sleepy, and not more than
two minutes after he had turned in
che snores which proceeded from his
berth showed thWt he was in the land
of dreams, His three friends had moi
gone to bed at all. They assembled
agWn in the smoking compartment
after the practical joker had gone ia
bed, and about forty minutes later
they saw the porter Of the ear march
up to the practical joler's berth, yank
aside the curtains and poke the man
inside.
"IIey, boss, it's Gun timc fo' yo'
leet'l dose said the porter, punching
the victim in the side end handing
him the bottle,
The three friends could only hear
some dstinG. growls coming from the
berth cf the awakened man, and then
they saw the porter poke him again.
"Yessuh, now is de time TO yo' med
icne, suh," the porter said again, and
then the three were peering out Of the
door Of the smoking room and heard
some genuinely warm language from
the berth of the man whose slumberS
had been broken
A few moments later the porter en-
tered the smoking compartment and
announced to the three that he had
duly handed the crazy man the bottle
of medicine.
"That's good, Nose, and you want
TO see that he gets good and awake
every half hour during the night,
too. Don't just let him roll over and
grunt, but poke him until he is broad
awake. 4 don't want anything to
happen around here, but that mans
liable to do something fierce IL he does
not take the stuff every half hour
said the man who had put up the job,
The porter promised that either lie
or his partner would attend to the
waking up stunt regularly every half
hour. and the three went to bed them
Sriscs, bllthely happy in the hope and
belief that the practical joker would
sctuolly be upon the brink of madness
by daylight.
The practical jokerwas rudely Jared
awuke about six times and told that
mis- mediclne-taking time had come
around before he tumbled to the fact
that the porter wasn't really making
mistake as to the berth of an inva-
yd, and when he reached the conclus-
ion thaS his friends were nt the bot
tom of the lob he nrnmnily rot mad.