The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1900-09-21

per. LOU are plODdDi9 Drtlet VI Will
out it.
Some people have 50 much patience
with themselves that they never sue
coed in anything.
Jinks-There's one good thing about
spoiled children. Binks-What's that7
Jinks-One never has them in ones
own house.
Il don't see what you Ike about this
fat, Clara" well, Clarence, II is the
only one we've looked at that fits our
Navajo Chicago Record
A false front. PA. our new dog is
awful d'ceitful" How, Tommy
why, when be barks at people he
wags his taiL"-Chicago Record.
Teacher lsuspiciouslyl-Who wrote
your composition. Johnny Johnny
Ny father. Teaeher-What, all Of lit
Johnny-No'm; helped him.-Truth.
Fair Painter-I hope you don't mind
my sketching in your fieldf Farmer
Lord, no, missile! You keep the birds
of tie peas better'n a ordinary scare
crow.
"sure. Pat, and why are ye wearin'
yer coat buttoned up loike that on
warm day loike thisg" Faith, yer riT-
erenee to hoide the shirt Oi haven't got
on.''-Puneh.
'Now. honestly, Maud. didn't Jack
! propose last EVENING"" why, y-e-e-s.
But how did you guessT' Il noticed
that you didn't have that worried look
this morning"
Real Cruelty: ooh. mummy, do come
and speak to Johnny; he's tweading on
all the worms in the garden" How
unkind." yes. and he won't let me-
twead on any.--The King.
Yisitor-What was the matter with
the man they just brought in? Doctor
stuck his head through 4 pane Of glass
Yisitor-How did he look? DOctor-His
face wore an injured expression.
Curious villager-Ay. Sandy, an ys
wis wounded at Magersfontein? Whit
wis ye struck wi? Sandy tired OF an
swering questionsl-I was struck VI
wonder when I kent l wisna killed
Evidence: Friend-I suppose the
baby is fond Of you? Papa-FOnd OF
me? Why, he sleeps all day when I'm
not at home, and stays up all night just
to enjoy my sOciety,-BroOklyn Life.
/ Magistrate-Do you mean TO say such
e a physical wreck as he is gave you
+ that black eye? Complaining Wife
d Shure. yer worship. he wasn't physi-
e cal wreck till be gave me tn black
= eye.
T Papa" said Willie, "why did you
l. buy golf coat.'' ITO play golf in my
u SON." said Mr. Willis. Did You need
L it," "Of course l did" Then I need
e a topcoat TO play tops in. seen EN-
p advertised
D. Teacher (endeavoring TO explain the
s. meaning Of the word ~harness')-What
,e does your father put on the horse
;e Small Boy (his face Frightening
is Please, sir. e puts on all e can if e
IN thinks it'll win.
I'd At the Summer Hotel: who Is that
ne good-looking young waiter who Is toss
'd ing the plates across the roOml Is be
he a student. toof7 Yes. He holds the
H. record In Harvale for discus-throwing.
OF Cleveland Plain Dealer.
AZ A Natural Reaction. HI Tragedy
r. l understand the audience last nigh
y was very colde Lowe Comerdy-Thel
OF were at first. but when they began Il
On recoliect that they had paid good none!
10 to see the show they got hot.-Philadel
phia Press.
Earmarks Of Literary Ability: "Dii
~, that critic write any favorable com
10 ment on your novel. Belindag On. yes
- he said my father had once met III
rs. Prince Of Wales and that we had a
Die ways moved in the best society III
dianapolis Journal.
to A Feminine Butter; And now, chi
ok. dren." said the teacher. who had bee
in talking about military fertilization
os- .can any Of you tell me what is ou
ers tresss - please. ma'am." cried lit
IKE Willie. swapping his fingers, Its
leo uanny-goat!'- Philadelphia Press.
' Mrs Brown must be going back
o the city at once; I've had three lettel
from my husband in two days Mr.
-. Gray-Why. you poor dearl I kno
inst how YOU feel: two would be susr
- ciously attentive-but threel 1 real
. am afraid he has been doing somethiE
- very reprehensible.-Broo Life.
by The following birth notice recent
appeared in the columns of 4 Hans:
this PAPER: Born TO the wife of Jim JOns
d boy. The boy favors his old dad
re- several ways. viz; He is bald, has
$. a red nose. takes to 4 bottle Ike a bun
at blebee to a lump of sugar, and makes
sci. lot Of noise about nothing. Selah!
sed Exchange.
tits The Virtuous Clerk: sign your mar
AIRY here" said the chief conspirator, al