New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1900-09-16

her. it is As titles to his various tales the
wardroom nomenclature For instance:
THE JUNIOR rAssAssIN's TALE.
OF course every. knows that the doctor Is
called The Assassin SIN And his assistant the Junior
ticular case of which write the Junior Assassin
kept the wine bill OF the wardroom. Well here's
This morning one Of the bluejackes called on
me m, and holding out his uptqrgned palm. said;
Would you look at THIS .; ERE SIR looked and
Vel what are they and what of them?' I
asked: ~ .,,.--
out my G s !P sn t9s S EGa a a
'Arder than the pawn stones o. Piccadilly. sir
Well, What did you do for hm?" 1 asked
Couldn't do anything at the t moment init, Go thd
weeyiIs got into the biscuits, when the eating Is
Certified to by the marine officer who there
and everything
The chief engineer U1nown only as the Chief
a patient, long suffering man who had spent many
n o S1 h @n be 9h of an a
getting the death rattle in its thousand threats;
that he would be called to stop leak at thirty
seven aud half minutes past any hour Of tho
His only envy was the man who could sleep undjs-
turbed through the whole night. So he told tale
THE CHIEFS TALE
Dd you ever happen to me meet RgIstEods, chief
TO the Lord We had all inherited When was as
one night sending a man up to him to report the
gradual disapPearance OF the vacuum in our air
sang out:
The answer game back in drowsy voice:
Half an hour alter the again raped AT the
The vacuum is much lower. sir
Very good. Tell me if ii gets stiIl lower
After another hall an hour:
All right: report to to me II fI' IL comes back
Audited and found correct by the marine who
=, The CHIEF sat in silence admirns how that chief
/ do no, know how the young poet will trea, the
Canterbury Tales Perhaps like a first class
with another knock-at-the-door story. II was told
The commandrr OF a cruiser is the epitomc Of
concentrated energy. You cannot get up too carII
boots on. sIoshinc round on the Wet decks You
cannot sit up late enough to be he is not
never sleeps lie is the bugbear OF the crew' ali
and sundry. hence the point to his story
THE COMMANDERS TALE
There was a bo'swan l knew McAlister by
just enough capital to bring him in interest 40
or or dlT it year You may be sure he was not long
where he secured for himself snug little cottage
i is possible for get in EnsIand nd When When he
got settled comfortably he employed a boy to come
The commander paused. and meeky suggested
that d the boswain. took It, wished to arise the
,na 0h dear an, no. not at an. objected the
knocked. Please. sir. the commander wants Won
WhereupOn every morning the free 10 swain
had the JOY OF singing out in his grandest voice
= Tell the commander to go to the devil"
True bill brought in by the marine who knew the
boy ~
Having quoted the marine officer otherwise The
Soldier often, II IS but right that should now
give him his turn The Soldier" when he was
not called the soldier, called The Third Form
Boy owing to his elephantinc idea of humor and
sort OF ShOrt-tailed sportvencss that betokened
one very. very young. 1t sight for the gods
to see his look of awful Importance he Struttcd
up and down scrutiniZng his men. is hard for
a third form boy to look important. But some
where he had acquired one pretty good yarn.
THE THIRD FORM BOYS TALE
Ever hear how Abbott-major now but was
then only loo-gaVe himself away to Feather
stonehaugh. owner of the MarauGar err" CThe ward
room always calls the captain "owner.') Abbott
the deucedest fellow for asking for leave |
was determined to get on the beach Now VOu
know those sand banks that lie off the east coast
OF Gnom"n right out OF sight of land, should say
quite sixty miles from the beach isn't it,"
The navigator nodded assent
We'll. one afternoon. when Abbott had turned
IN Tor a SnOoze, what does the do but run
bang upon one Of the banks The shock wok,
Abbott up, AND when he hears that the engines arr,
stopped and the ship not moving. he knows they re
I'm some safe haIbOr other. don't you know
grabs his hat, and, without asking any questions
or looking about him. dashes up to the bridge and
asks leave OF the captain to go ashore
They court martialIed Featherstonehaugh for
sub
Yes" answered the Third Form Boy ''but they
acquitted him after hearing the circumstances
But the deuce of ii is that since that happened
captains quote 1t as d precedent; say they're en-
titled to heaVe a soldier overheard at any time
Cont you know"