davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
j. j. ii ROW M,
MADE WEIRD PICTURES.
A. Practical Joke That Was Played
ON n Photographer.

ON PHOTOGRAPHER.
A professional photographer tells a tale
OF practical joke.
One day a young man came to sit for
his likeness. To the ordinary eye he look
ed like any other young man. A couple
of plates were exposed, and then the as
sistant who was operating went into the
darkroom to develop the negatives.
He was gone much longer than usual
and was heard berating the junior assist
ant pretty soundly for playing pranks
with the apparatus. When he returned
to the studio. he asked for another sitting
and apoogized for having before used
spoiled plates.
This time when he went away to de-
velop he was heard to utter slight
scream, but he reappeared and SAID there
was a peculiar effect in the negative
which he couldn't account for. and would
the sitter oblige him again.
Once more he went to develop. Then
the bell rang violently for the master, and
the two held long confabulation in the
darkroom together This time the master
tried his hand and went away to develop.
1t was not long before he returned and
said he was sorry not TO be able to get
satisfactory likeness, but a skull and
crossbones appeared defined on the young
mans forehead.
Rubbish" said the sitter. "My fore
heads all right. Can you see anything
the matter with my forehead" And he
peered into mirror as he spoke.
mo, there's nothing that | can see,"
answered the photographer. But 1
should be obliged if you will please go
away and not come here again. This
sort of thing is just wee bit creepy"
Upon this there was n dreadful scene,
but the upshot was that the young man
had to go and up to the present has not
returned.
The explanation of the matter is that
the young man was a bit of scientist
and had been playing joke on the pho
tographer. Bisulphate of quinine is a
chemical which is white in the naked
eye, but seen black by the camera. Any
thing that is painted on the skin, there
fore. with the chemical will be ordinarily
invisible. but will come out prominently
in a photographic Tit-Bits.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
ODD EFFECT OF MONEY.
Pay Day Makes Many Men Act Like
Comedians,

The cashier was in a communicative
mood. 1t was pay day, and as he stood
inside his little inclosure he congratulated
himself upon the fact that his cash had
balanced to a cent and that the pay en-
velopes were ready for delivery. He was
talking to the old time reporter and re-
marked:
Its strange how many staid men there
are who become comedians on pay day.
Just stand here l5 minutes and you will
hear more genuine drivel to the square
yard than you ever dreamed of before"
The old time reporter determined to in
vestigate. The first man to approach was
the moody chap who seemed to have trou-
BILE on his mind every day in the week.
But it was different on pay day.
Hello, Cashley, old man." said he to
the cashier Il heard that the institution
was short of funds, so | thought | might
as well hurry up and avoid the rush.
Funny how these rumors circulate"
The next to approach was the dapper
little person who congratulates himself
that the concern could not get along with
out him.
whats this? Do my eyes deceive
meT" he exclaimed as he perceived the
hardest worker in the building drawing
his envelope. "Are you still on the pay
roll? Why, l thought the management
had sized you up long ago"
Instead of standing around Is minutes
the old time reporter extended the limit,
and here are some Of the specimens of
wit, wisdom and humor that he heard
drop from the lips of supposedly rational
beings:
Don't know what to do with this mon
ey, now that / have it." from the man
who had been out of work for seven
months.
whats this? Why, / was assured by
the boss that | would find $50 more in
my envelope this week. He must have
overlooked it." This from the individual
who had been expecting dismissal for
month.
"Still paying off in gold, see, in spite
of the fact that you know | am not strong
enough to carry it around with me"
chuckled the heavyweight of the estab-
lishment.
Just as soon as we organize our union
we will have this money brought to our
houses instead of being obliged to come
after it, chimed the fellow who had
been broke for five days.
''Well, | suppose | might as well take
those salary checks and have them framed
as souvenirs" chuckled the young man
who had drawn most of his salary in ad-
vance.
Just stop to think" mused the CASH
ier during lull, that | am obliged to
stand here and listen to all this one day
in each week, and still my friends wonder
why | don't take in the vaudeville shows.
To make matters worse, the management
refuses TO allow me to protect myself
with gun or pistol. Chicago Chronicle.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
How Nature Works.

Nature may be the best physician, but
her business methods as bookkeeper
would scandalize a Monte Carlo roulette
gambler. Sowing bushels to harvest pecks
would be considered poor farming, but
the mystic manager of the organic uni
verse" scatters 5000 acorns to raise one
oak and 2.50O,O00 sturgeon eggs to
evolve one sturgeon. The experimental
work of her pottery shop has covered the
neighboring fields with hillocks of shards.
Every species of living animals, accord
ing to Professor Haeckel, has been de-
veloped at the expense Of scores of less
perfect entities.-lndianapo News.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Uncle Sam and Foreign NrvIcs.

The collection of photographs from life
of foreign naval vessels in the possession
of the Office Of naval intelligence is prob
ably not excelled by any similar collec-
ton in the world. Through our naval
representatives abroad this department
has been steadily gathering information
In this form for many years past. and it
is not too much to say that, with the in
formation in store here, the navy depart
ment can inform itself at once Of the ex-
act force Of any nation at any designated
point Of the globe. The information re-
lates to personnel and material and is
In the main exact and ofticial.-Boston
Globe.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

Your best feelings, your social position
or busines success depend largely on the
perfect action of your Stomach and
Liver. DR. Kings New Life Pills give
increased strength, keen, clear brain,
high ambition A % cent box will make
you feel like a new being. Sold by
Paules g. Cos druggists.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Auatrian Female Conx,cts

Austria is the one civilized country in
the world which never puts n woman in
prison. Instead OF giving a female Grim
inal so many months in jail she is sent.
no matter how terrible is her record. to
one or the other of the converts devoted
TO the purpose and kept there during the
time for which she is sentenced. The
convent is not mere prison in disguise.
for the courtyard stands open all day
long, the only bar to egress being man
who acts as porter, just as in other con
tents.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Worlds Uhamninl,

Il tried many remedies to cure piles,
writes w r. Smith Of Latham, Ill,
''but found no relief till fused Bucklen s
Arnioa Salve. have not been troubled
with piles since, . 1t s the only champion
pile cure on earth and the best salve in
the world CSC per box, guaranteed by
Paules & Cos. druggist.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
A IRA nRlafOr.

The word translator, meaning a mender
of boots, has revived or perhaps has
never died Recently Judge Bacon at
Whitechapel asked a man, what are
you?" He replied. "a translator" Judge
Bacon: "Of languages?" "No, boots. |
make old boots new all the week and
sell on a barrow in Petticoat lane on
Sunday"
Bailey d736 A. d. explains trans
lator" as IA new vamper of old shoes"
etc. | remember the word with this
meaning occurring in the old Radnor
church parish registers.-Notes and
Queries.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Where III Ended.

"The man who wrote Home, Sweet
Home was a bachelor, believe" she
said.
yes" he replied. "What beautiful
thing would have been lost to the world
If he had married before he wrote it."
Then they came out from behind the
nnlms.-Chicago Times Herald
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Him Work,

81 can't give you any money. A stout,
ablebodied fellow like you ought to be
earning living"
But haven't any work, sir"
"That's your own fault, I'll venture to
say. You lack energy. You don't throw
yourself into your work"
az wouldn't like to. Nor would you,
sir"
"Oh. wouldn't, Ell? Why not?"
I'm a gravedigger." r."-London Fun.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
A Woman's Awful Peril.

There is only one chance to save your
life and that is through an operation"
were the startling words heard by Mrs.
LIB. Hunt of Lime Ridge, Wis, from
her doctor after he had vainly tried TO
cure her of frightful case of stomach
trouble and yellow jaundice. Gall
stones had formed and she constantly
grew worse Then she began to use
Electric Bitters which wholly cured her.
It's wonderful Stomach, Liver and
Kidney remedy, Cures Dyspepsia, Loss
of Appetite, Try it. Only 80 cts. Guar
anteed For sale by Paules & Cos Drug
gists.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

Ivory handles of knives require a spe-
cial course Of treatment when they be-
come discolored. Mix ammonia and olive
oil in equal parts and add to the mixture
prepared chalk to make a good paste.
Rub the ivory with this and let the paste
dry before brushing it off. Two or three
applications are often needed when the
ivory is much discolored.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

w rAAs
] am not feeling well today,
But why | cannot see.
j had some ice cream cross the way
And pancakes homie for tea.
] also had some caramels,
And sugared almonds, too,
And, when | met with Tommy Wells,
A stick of fine tulu.
But ! was careful with each one;
Too much OF none ate.
1t cannot be that penny bun,
And yet the pain is great.
] had six cookies, but I've had
Six cookies oft before;
They've never left me feeling bad,
Nor pickles-three or more.
The soda water couldn't make
Me i'll; twas Billy's treat.
] sort of think this fearful ache
Comes wholly from the heat.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
The Best Cold Cure,

one you can take without Interrupt
5ion to business, One that does not
effect the head or hearing like the con-
tinued use of quinine. One that cures
speedily and leaves you feeling fresh and
clear headed. Such one in Kranses
Cold Cure. Price 25c. Sold by Ross
man & Sons Pharmacy.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
He wasn't Pretty.

Angry Poltician-See here. I've good
notion to bave you arrested for libel!
What do you mean by picturing me as
you have?
Cartoonist-But the picture looks like
you.
Angry Poltician-i fnow il does. !
know it does But do look like n man
who likes to look like himself?-Balti-
more American.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
London school Children.

The London school board is responsible
for the education of a population more
than double that of Denmark or Greece,
larger than that of Scotland and only ex-
ceeded slightly by that of Bavaria and
Holland. The child population of Lon
don in need of elementary education is
larger than the total population of any
European city except Paris, Berlin. st.
Petersburg. Moscow and Vienna. 1t is
more than double the population of Bris-
tol, Dresden or Prague. The sum annu-
ally expended on elementary education
in the metropolis is alone equal to the to-
tai national expenses of Denmark, Nor
way and Sweden, not TO mention that Of
many minor states of Europe.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Just Like n Man.

She-Ah, Emil, my parents won't allow
me to marry you. There's nothing for us
to do but to die together!
He-Yes, dear, we have no other choice
but to debut not today, for we have
fricasseed chicken for dinner, my favor
ite dish h!-Fliegende Batter.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Wanted ComDauy

When small Bobby had worn his first
pair Of trousers for an hour, he went to
his mother and begged 20 have on his kilt
again.
What for?" she asked.
Because" replied Bobby, Il feel so
lonesome in pants"
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Colds Melt AWav,

if you use Krauses Cold Cure. Pre-
pared in convenient capsule form they
are easy to take and effect a speedy
cure of the most obstinate cases. Price
25c. Sold by Rossman & Sons Phar-
macy.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

Il A map of Chi
ma is placed over
one of the Unit
ed States, there
will remain un-
covered an area
exceeding the to-
tai area of Eng
land, France and
Germ any, and
the population of
t he Celes tial
* IN z d o IN Is
greater thanthat
of Russia, Ger
many, England,
Japan, France,
Austria and the
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Accounted For.

What seems To be the matter with
him?' asked the doctor, approaching the
bedside of the man who lay swathed in
bandages.
He found the gas Leak" explained the
nurse.-Chicago Tribune.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Sleeps Faces.

The face of sheep does not only In
dicate elegance of form generally, but
1t is the most sure and certain indica-
ton of the best feeding quality.-Sheep
Breeder.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
SANITARY DRINKING CUP.

Insures Cleanliness by Constant
Flow of Fresh Water.
Members OF both the board of edu-
cation and the board of health are dis
cussing a new drinking cup for use in
the Atlanta public schools. 1t is rep
drinking utensil that has yet been in
vented. A picture of the new cup ia
reproduced herewith from the Atlanta
Constitution.
The cup is stationary and rests over
basin which catches the overflow.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Temporarily Suppressed.

"What are the names of that newly
married couple in the next fiat"
"Oh. we can't find out for a few
weeks: each now calls the other 'Birdie.'"
indianapolis Journal
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

The first swarm from hive is always
led by an old queen, the second by the
eldest princess, who is often obliged TO go
In great hurry owing to her younger sis
ters emerging from their cells.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

At Kyak, Alaska. are great fishing
grounds. Halibut is caught there weigh
ing $50 pounds, cod AZ pounds and sal
mon 5S pounds.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

The largest painting in the world, ex-
elusive of the panorama and cyclorana,
Is in the grand saloon of the doges' pal
ace at Venice This painting is "a feet
rr;Io hrr u foot hirh
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
phflOMOnhfCQl.

Snarley-What's self esteem2
Yow-It's something we all hate TO see
In some one else, but which is virtue IL
we possess it ourselves.-Syracuse Her
aid.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

miles north of Hang Chow, in the coast
province of Kiang 81, lies the famous
old city of Suchau, IN the valley of the
Yang-tse. This region is renowned for
its fine climate, its fertile soil, its for
ests and fruits. From the days Of the
earliest travellers to the present time it
has been called paradise, and the Chi
nese have a saying that to be happy on
earth zone must be born in Suchau,
live in Canton and die in Hang Chow"
GEORGE l.. KILMER.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

Cups and saucers are never used for
tea in Russia. The drinking vessel for
sea is the "stakan," glass tumbler in
silver holder.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
CHINA'S WIDE REALM
THE EMPIRE CAN SWALLOW KING
DOMS, PEOPLE AND LANDS.

The Great Plain of Northern China.
Vast Basin of the Yang-tse In the
Center of the Empire-One Province
AS Popuious as the United States.
LCnnr.riecht 1aNN by C L Kilmarl
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

The natives OF Hawaii, be they ever so
poor, never steal or beg. These olfenses
are confined almost eyn'u-i,r'y to the
Portuguese residents of lhe island.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
A Keen Clear Brain.

In most things success depends on
knowing how long it takes to succeed.
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
of pruCffpnI NIaa

II want the boy ter Farm history"
said the farmer, SOS he kin write one
D them historical novels an make money
enough to paint the barn an have the
mules shod. Atlanta Constitution.
An Onion cure.
Among the Chileans a belief prevails
that the juice Of onions is a sure cure
for typhoid fever if given in its earlier
stages
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13
Tortured A Witness.

Intense suffering was endured by with
ness T. L. Martin, of Dixie, Ky, before
he gave this evidence: | coughed every
night until my throat was nearly raw
then tried DR.. Kings New Discovery
which gave instant relief. / have used
it in my family for four years and re-
commend it as the greatest remedy for
Coughs, Colds and all Throat, Chest and
Lung troubles. 1t will stop the worst
cough, and not only prevents but abso-
lutaly cures Consumption. Price SOC and
S1.00. Every bottle guaranteed. Trial
bottles free at Paules & Cos Drug
Store
Montour American. (Danville, Pa.) 1866-1920, 1900-12-13

Copyright, 1900, by G. L. Kilmer.I
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1900-03-10

Hon. Geo Kersten, a well-known Jus
tice Of the Peace OF Chicago, sayss "I
was afflicted with catarrh for nine
years. My catarrh was located chiefly
in my head. tried many remedies
without avail. / applied 20 seyeral doc
tors, but they were not able to cure me.
/ learned Of the remedy, Pe-ru,na,
through the daily newspapers. After
taking the remedy for 10 weeks / was
entirely cured. consider my cure per-
manent, as it has been two and half
years since was cltred."
The Governor OF Oregon is an ardent
admirer of PS-ru-pa. He keeps it con-
tinually in the house. In a recent letter
TO Or. Hartman he says:
at have had occasion to use your Pc
ru-na medicine In my family for colds,
and II proved TO be an excellent remudy.
have not had occasion 10 use IL for
other ailments.
Yours very truly, w. M. Lord"
Pe-ru-na is known from the Atlantic
TO the Pacific. Letters Of congratula-
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1900-03-10

The spring term o. the territorial
normal school at Edmond viii open
open April . and close June 30. In
addition to the regular normal diplo-
ma and preparatory & turses there vii
be offered, under the regular faculty
a special course OF twelve weeks for
teachers. This course will inclu e all
the subjects required for the various
certificates, and in addition. psvchol-
ogy, method in education. vocal music
and drawing. There are no fees and
board may be obtained or rooms rent
ed az most reasonable rates. The
special course has been arranged for
Tho sc teachers who have been at work
In winter schools and who desire ad-
vancement,
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1900-03-10

Do you have that tired feeling? Dc
you feel sluggish, billions and out OF
sorts generally2 DO you have sicl,
headache? Do you have pimples, ,eiup-
tions, blotches, ulcers. sores or other
results OF constipation? To be healthy
the sewer of the body, the bowels,
must be kept ia an active. healthy con-
dition, and nothing does IL so we'll as
Bailey's Laxative Tablets. They bring
a clear, rosy complexion and a clear
head. A tablet or two taken at night
makes you feel fine In the morning
The l0 cent packages contain 20 tab
let's, and the 25c packages 60 tablets.
Chocolate coated. W. j. Ballet is
written on each package. Lakeside
Medicine Company, Chicago, proprie-
tor. Sample free. Remember they
cure constipation. Sold by c. R. Rem
fro, Guthrie.
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1900-03-10
THE CHURCHES.

First church OF Christ, Scientist. will
hold services N the church building
corner Of Ash snd Villas streets sun.
wednesday evening service at 8 al
the SAME place,
NJ, Z church, south. corner Broad
and Villas. Usual services At III and
1880. Sunday scnool at 10, Junior
League at 8, Senior League AZ go.
Special services at o'clock for the
children. The pastor wiz lcetrat To
his talk to the children Ibg lsving on
exhibition twenty specimens from the
holylend consisting OF gopner wood
cedar Lebanon, olive oil, lentii beans,
salt from near Sodom, etc. special
Invitation is given to the children and
their parents.
First Presbyterian church. corner Of
Noble ave. and Div sion street. There
will be the usual service at II a. M
and 1880 p. m. The Womap's Mission
ary ptase service will be held. Sab
bath school at 9;45 a. m. Y. =. 5. c. f..
at 6:3O
Trinity church, Broad and Noble
Second Sund1y in Lent. Sunday school
10 a. m. Service aud sermon Il M.
Evening service and sermon 1890 p. M.
Full surpiced choir morning aud even
ing. Seats free Every body welcome
Plymouth Congregational church
The usual services will be held morn
Ing and evening. Sunday school at 10
o'clC ck All are invited
w. j. MARSH, Pastor
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1900-03-10
PRESIDENT KRUGER ASKS ENG.
LAND FOR CESSATION OF
TIOSTTLITIES.

LONDON. MARCH 9.--(5:10 p. m.)-
Late this afternoon It ts learned that
the peace rumors were founded on the
fact that Presidents Kruger has appeal
ed to Lord Salisbury for a cessation OF
hostilities offering at length. by cable,
the terms which he is willing to accept.
These however, are not taken seriously
as they include practically nothing
more than what the Transvaal govern
ment offered prior to the issuing Of
the British ultimatum.
Official circles here regard the propo-
sitions as merely a ruse Of the Beers
TO gain time and do not consider that
President Kruger is yet ready to con-
slider sweeping demands which Great
Britain viii make as reimbursement
for the loss OF life and great expendi-
ture. eanna
It was understood that President
Kruger had met with an emphatic re-
lection at the hands OF Lord Salisbury,
who is believed to have said that no
such attempt to retain the independ-
ence Of the Transvaal can be consider
ed by the British government
The Guthrie daily leader. [volume] (Guthrie, Okla.) 1893-1996, 1900-03-10

Bicycle Berry Book, No OF The
Bicycle Books is all about berries. A
whole encyclopedia of berry lore, boil
ed down after the manner of Farm
Journal. Tells about varieties, about
planting, growing, mulching, cul tivst-
ing, picking and marketing. II gives
practical pointers from the pens of
scores OF leading berry growers from
all parts OF the country who have con-
tributed TO it's colums, II has Colored
representations of berry true TO size
and color, thiuty-three portraits OF
practical berrymeu, and thirty-five
other illustrations, handsomely bound
in cloth. The price Is so cents, free
by mail; address the publishers, Will.
mer Atkinson Co., PHI NdelpfiR.