The free press. (Poplarville, Miss.) 1890-19??, 1900-09-27


And among the things they had
Were a man he called his ''caddy"
And the man she thought cad.
philadelphia Bulletin.
Not Afraid of Thunder
"Are YOU not afraid of thundor|
81, OF course not. I'm only afraid
of lightning. "-Cleveland PAIN Deal-
er.
An Evidence.
He-"Did it ever occur 10 You that
I might be in love with youE
She-"Oh. yes. Why, haven't you
ever seen me laughing to myseIT-
Puck.
The Air Trust, Likely.
"At last you are at my mercy
Kissed the villain in the play
my starsr' exclaimed the lonG-suf-
fering. inoffensive cid man; what
new trusts are you the president of!'',
Puck.
Cautious Man.
us Graves cautious m&rP
ooh very. He always blows in a
revolver to see if it is loaded apd&
snaps any gun that is left standing8
around. Chicago Times Herald.
Had the Essentials.
81 wonder how so practical people
as the Scotch happened to originate
golf"
oh that was easy for them; they
already had the plaids. '-Chicas0 Rec
ord.
Enjoyment.
do you enjoy reading DickeHs:'
every much" answered Miss Cay
enne. His works contain SO many
odd and villainous characters to whom
it is pleasure to compare ono's enc
mics"
His Apprehension.
"You are not afraid to go up in it,"
asked the inventor of the flying ma
chine.
Not a bit." replied his friend.
'What I'm worried about is coming
down. Puck.
An Esthetic Diversion.
us your new boarding place aristo-
cratic?"
Yes, very; when we begin to eat
corn off the cob our landlady gets up
from the table and starts music
box to playing. Chicago Record.
Not Gone For Good.
Scadds-"What's become Of your
pretty typewriterT
Trayder-"She and the bookkeCper
left me very suddenly"
Scadds-"For good?'
Trayder-"No. For better, for
worse elieve"-Philadelph Press.
Cheering Him Up.
Mr.. Newlywed-"I saw your =,
lover on the street to-day looking avn
fully blue"
Mrs. Newlywed-"I hope you tried\
to cheer him up
Mr.. Newlywed-"Oh, yes. l showed
him my buttonless shirt and that new
tie you bought me" Judge.
The Dyspeptic Commenter.
"My voice" said the young woman,
sis all my own. l have never taken
vocal lesson"
In other words" said the Confirmed
Dyspeptic, who kindly volunteers re-
marks to help along the Struggling
Humorists, you sing that way be-
cause you can't help t."-Indianapolis
Press.
An Estimate.
"What compensation 90 YOU get
from your present employment"
asked the young mans uncle.
Compensation echoed the youth,
drawing himself up until he showed
at least an inch of neck above his
high collar. The money | receive
for my services is very far from be-
ing a compensation. 1t is merely a
consideration"
The Oak and the Ivy.
"You should be the oak" said the
idealistic young woman, while your
wife should be the clinging ivy
yes" answered Mr.. Meekton, "thaF1
is just what has happened. Henrietta
has assumed the role Of ivy and grown \
with such luxuriance that great
many people scarcely suspect there
is any oak present"
Her Description.
Il find him very annoying" res
marked Miss Cayenne.
HE means Well"
81 suppose so. But he is one OF
those people who honestly believe that
their duty to society is fully met if
they keep saying excuse me- every
time they yawn or sneeze or make
themselves otherwise conspicuous"
Practical View.
you don't mean to tell me that
you spend on an average an hour
day playing whist"' said the man who
takes life very seriously indeed.
Yes" answered the friend.
THAT is six hours a week Why.