The age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1897-1902, 1900-09-08
SKETCHES FROM
EVERYDAY LIFE


versy, it is well to know the etiquette OF
the situation and to have some idea of the
proper forms and language to be used I'M
der the circumstances. You will not find
this in The Complete Letter Writer" nor
in THE Art of Correspondence 1t is we'll
therefore, the newspapers of the day fur
nlsh us with some classic models, which
it behooves US to study. The following is
a form of rejoiner taken from an Alabama
paper, which will be called the Times for
short. The editor says, speaking of rival
paper, the Southerner:
1t has been the policy of the Times
to treat with silent contempt the num-
erous malicious personal assaults and
false misrepresentation heaped upon its
editor by the irresponsible scribblers
whose utterances have appeared in the
columns of the so-called Southerner.
Forbedrance has ceased to be a virtue,
and going undisputed, some of these
falsehoods might be considered true, SO
we beg the indulgence of our readers
to make a statement of the facts and
let the public judge between the editor
of the Times and his dastardy assail-
ants.
AS to our being a Republican, if any
one VINO has read after our pen will call
our attention to the sentence, word or
syllable that has appeared in our paper
that is not Democratic, we will agree
that what the seribblers of the South
erner has said of us is true, and we will
throw up the sponge This charge is of
course lie. The writer of this unmiti-
gated SANDER knew it WAS false every
time he penned 1t. That is enough to
saw about the Ttroaa How a hnut tha
Southerner? 1t did not come here a
competitor for business, for that would
have been legitimate and honorable. 1t
leveiled its artillery at the Times and
tried to force 1t to the wall. The pro-
prietor took a hand under the nom de
plume of Citizen" and a certain young
attorney SHE'D his castor into the ring
under the powerful name of Demo
GRAFT" How the Times withstood the
ponderous blows of two such influen-
tial 60 and fascinating knights of the
quill is marvellous, but 1t is still in the
ring doing business at the same old
stand with the largest circulation in
the county.
1.-The Southerner Is rat" sheet.
Some of it's courthouse friends hunt up
advertisements for it at half the regu-
lar rate. This Is considered dishonor-
able by all trades and professions. The
Southerner is not really a newspaper. A
newspaper Is SuDpOStu 10 nave 5ctb-
eral circula ton in the county. The
Southerner has no such circulation. The
postmasters records show that the
Southerner weighed in and mailed only
IS lbs. ozs. of papers to the different
postoffices in the county last week. The
Times mailed for the same week 6S lbs.
ozs., almost four times as much. The
Times has about 800 bona fide subscrib-
ers, while the Southerner has but 200.''
The foregoing is a masterful model of
the art of repartee, the only weakness
shown in this otherwise strong article, is
the tendency of the Times to brag about
It's circulation. This is not in good taste
but seems to be a weakness that none of
our leading papers are free from.
The Memphis Scimitar has collected sew
eral controversial models from its ex-
changes which will repay reading In one
case some loathsome contemporary has
been trying to inveigle the Obion Chronicle
into a mud-slinging match, and is thus
rebuked by that esteemed journal:
1.-The management of the Chronicle
shall, in the future as in the past, en-
deavor to hold it up to its present high
standard as a reliable, reputable news
paper, and in consequence of this fact
we shall ignore all endeavors of any
measly, little, disreputable gourd-head
to get himself complimented by a notice
in this paper. We are somewhat mind
full Of our associates; we have been
taught 1t, and we shall not digress
from our raising by imposing on our
readers any reply whatever to any
bray which may chance to emanate
from the hungry 1ackass who has
nothing at stake. Our space is too
valuable"
Here is another good model from the
Sentinel Record. They are having a
and parrot time In Garland Coun-
ty, where there are two Democratic can
didates for Sheriff. The Sentinel Record
says of one of the aspirants and his sup
porters: -. z
pirate Williams most intimate mates
of his crew of political buccaneers will
engage in wholesale trading of his fell
low nominees on the gangster ticket;
but even treachery to his associates will
not save him from defeat on Monday.
The people have determined that Will
liams must go out of business as a
tyranncal ruler of public affairs and a
would-be terrorist of private citizens,
who have committed the crime against
him of refusing to be cringing vassals
of the machine
Billings-"In your club, doesn't 1t some
times come awkward to have to follow
rules and refrain from re-
ferring to man by his name?" Gibson
MOT at all For example, whensI speak
of Beesley as that apology for a man
whose gigantic prominence is his diminu-
tive inferiorfty, everybody knows whom
mean"
The Lincoln rad shows no sign OF abat
ing. Even Mr.. Bryan is quoting him liz
his speeches. Lincoln had, in addition to
his level head, a fund of humor. A story
is told of young man who applied to
Lincoln during the war for a government
position. Lincoln told him to so and see
Stanton and tell him that he (Lincoln) said
to give him a job. The young man re-
turned shortly afterwards and said that
Stanton refused to do it. Lincoln then
wrote Stanton a note asking him If pos
sible to find some position for the youth,
and, giving him the note, sent him back
to Stanton. The next day the young man
came to see Lincoln again. "Well,' said
Lincoln, did you see Mr. Stanton?" "Yes.
SIR did you get posttion?' mo. SIR
What did Mr.. Stanton say?" He said