The Elk Mountain pilot., 1900-06-12

For five minutes they smoked cigarettes
| in silence. Suddenly Tommy Smith gave
a wriggle in his deep arm chair. and sat
up, with the first smile his chubby
face that had appeared there that morn
Ing. While devising jugEies for his friend
he had been perfectly solemn; indeed.
| they both had been. After ali. has
| been stated. they were at the turning
point of their careers.
by George" said Tommy Smith. I'm
| a much cleverer chap than you. Joskin.
I've got 1T. How big was the bump ON
your head?"
''As big house hens egg. to
Judge from what 1t felt like"
Half an inch high?" asked Tommy.
"Rather"
And the shovel?" A new waiter had
made up the nre. and forgotten that the
heavy and grimy iron implement he had
used was not part of the usual smoking
room furniture. Tommy Smith had picked
1t up and was thrusting 1t toward his
friend. LAS big as that?'' he asked.
II never saw the shovel said Harold
Josynghame; the police told me about II
atterward. I knew all about the bump.
though. by then-I couldn't get my hat
en-"
'Joslin," said Tommy Smith. present.
| ing the handle of the club shovel. ''be a
| pal I'm as near as tcucher a quarter
| of an inch under height. rather more than
less. Put bump onto my head half an
inch high. ard I'm through the medical
like a knife through butter"
Mr.. Josynghame took the shovelx and
locked at him admiringly. Mean it" he
asked.
Rather" said his friend. "I'N take 1;
sitting, though. Look sharp, before any
cne comes in" He sat upright in his
chair. gripping the arms Of It and clench-
ing his teeth. Go on. I'll shut my eyes.
II you'd rather"
spangl The shovel came down on the
skull of MFR. Tommy Smith with sound
like a cracked bell muffied. He gave q
little gasp.
Harder. old chap he Eaid. blinking.
'end a little more IN the middle. Can't
u-swing-it-a-bit7
Span&l 1t descended again. and Tommy
Smith gasped and turned red nrst.
then white. A member of the club had
opened the door as the blow fell. He
gssped. too. dropped a cigarette In an am
bsr mouthpicce fully four inches long.
recovered 1t much damaged and retired
Irecipitately under the impression that
two of his fellow members were settling
ar affair of honor with the fire irons
aft er drawing lots. He was a gentleman
of honor and discretion himself and he
felt that he had no right TO intrude or to
mention 1t to the committee
1t was a minute or two before Tommy
spoke.
.Au right" he said at last. with an un-
certain smile. and his friend looked re-
Ecved. II saw a hatful OF stars that
time. should think that would work
it I'll sit here-hve minutes. Then we'll
start. When we're once there the longer
tic beggars keep us waiting the better.
fna1 tr att inU nj
Ten minutes later. as they were getting
into a hanson, his friend inquired how he
felt.
IT suppose I've got headache" he
| answered. 1--WE never had such a thing
| before: but the bumps raising beautifully"
And did they pass their medical7" And
| Gid they otherwise satisfy their examin-
ers as to their fitness to hold commissions
in her maJesty's army? l can only say
that that night short. sQuare-buil.
youth Journeyed from his club to a lodg-
ing house in Jermyn street the roof
of q four-w wheeler. after Offering to carry
the cab on his back down Picadilly. ard
that the butler at Josynshame house.
Knightsbridse, had to help one Of the
younger hopes OF the family upstairs and
tell his lady mother that much work had
made Mr.. Harold a bit dizzy.
OF their subsequent careers know
nothing. Either OK both OF them may
have toilod up the hillside at Glands
laagte or fallen before the first wttherins
volley at Magersfontein. But I know
this, that under other names and cir
| cumstances and at different times each
| of them passed board of medical ex-
| aminers by the methods have described.
| know 1t because i was told so by two
| of my friends. As. however. one Of my
| irformants soon after telling me passed
| beyond the reach Of examiners in Afghan
| istan, and have forgotten the name Of
| other I might almost we'll have said
| nothing about them and claimed credit
| for originality that do not possess
Pail Mall Gazette.