davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Caleb el.....,. rheumatic Potatoes.

The most famous man in eastern
Washington county Me, Is Caleb
Gushing Clark. Cape Cod fisherman,
who came ashore at Bailey's Mistake
In company with his schooner during
the gale of September 1, 1893 The
schooner landed among the rocks and
alder bushes twenty yards beyond
ligh water mark, and lies where she
struck. Clark discreetly remained be
low deck until the storm had subsidized
when liz went to Il neighbours house
and Wna "a an lawn with an attach -
rheumatic fever, which kept him in
bed three mouths. The owner of the
house liked him so well that he OBJ
tanned employment In the sardine fish
cries as soon as he was able TO work,
making him SO contented that he has
never wished To return to Province
town.
Though Clark can place an attach
ment on Fame on account of the perilS
he has seen, his chief claim to dlstine-
ton lies in the possession of n remark
able breed of potatoes, the original
Seeding of which was given to him by
his benefactor for the purpose of cur
ing rheumatism. He began to carry
this potato in his pocket in March,
1891. At that time it was larger than
IA hens egg, hard and full of Juice.
During the summer II began to wrinkle
and grow iiabby, so that Clark thought
Of throwing ii away for n new one.
ana would have done so several times
had he not been assured that to shift
rheumatic potato meant bad luck.
During the next year il Ind fallen
away To the size of an English walnut
aud became hardened, lying in his
pocket like II block of wood.
Meanwhile Clark'S rheumatism had
entirely disappeared, So enc day in the
spring Of 1896, after getting badly wet
ted from dipping SardincS, ne hung his
trousers on fence to wash out IN the
rain and left the osseous potato in one
of the pockets. In June tile rheumatism
returned with fury, which reminded
Clark of his potato ON searching his
trousers pockets for the tallsman he
found 1t had sprouted and partially de-
cayed Remembering the good it had
done him, Clark planted the tuber in
the garden and procured a fresh potato
for his malady lie continued to ache
all summer until the potato which had
proved so useful to him had produced
its crop of tubers when he selected n
small one from the lot of six aud put
ii in his pocket.
That was three years ago. Since then
Clark has been propagating and selling
rheumatic potatoes every season. He
has sold individual tubers for as much
rs 81 for single specimen though his
regular price Is = cents.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
THE MoRALIST.

The intoxieatlon of anger, like that
of the grape. shows us to others, but
hides US from ourselves.
An old man is easier robbed than
a young one, for his locks are few, and
his gait Is generally broken.
Ever since Rebecca met Jacob at the
well, mothers have been taking their
manageable daughters to watering
places.
1t Is said that people who change
their minds often never get a better
one. They are. perhaps, not to blame
for trying.
There Is a club in Penang, on the
west coast of the Malay peninsula,
composed of Chinese who hold debates
in English.
In Ireland an acre comprises seven
ty-eight hundred and forty square
yards, while In Scotland sixty-one hum
dred and forty go to the acre.
I find nothing so singular in life as
this, that everything opposing appears
to lose Its substance the moment one
actually grapples with it.-Hawthorne.
Character is power: 1t makes friends.
creates friends. draws patronage and
support, and opens sure and easy
way to wealth. honor, and happiness
]. Halves.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
THE W!sEAcRE.

Voice is not an index OF character so
much as an index of climate.
He who hesltates is lost He who new
er hesitates hasn't been found, either.
We could acquire all foreign lam
guages In the time given to gossiping
i'm own.
At this time no great man feels that
his fame is complete until somebody
has named a chrysanthemum after
him.
The woman with a chaotic top bur-
eau drawer always has a delusion that
SIZE is going TO straighten 1t up to-mor-
row.
A pessimist is one who forsees the
future meals OF warmed-over turkey
before the Thanksgiving dinner has
been eaten.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
One Way of Making a Living.

There are many and various ways of
making living in this big city, says
the New York Times, aul between
chasing eighths" in Wall Street and
chasing potato-bugs In Jamaica, the
ways of gathering dollars are of wide
range. One of those seldom seen by
any except the people directly II ter
ested Is the oYtgrowth of recent extern
sive waterfront improvements IN the
Navy Yard. Strihsers, timbers, and
planking Of yellow pine and spillng Of
spruce have Seen used by the scow-
load. apd around the corner of the
yard. ip Little-st., some onterprising
young men have started woodward.
Ends of spiles, rejected planks, any
thing of wood that is found floating in
the Wallabout Channel Is taken in
out of the wet" dried, split and
peddled around the neighborhood at
prices which the kindling-wood peo-
pie cannot touch, but Which, low as
they are, represent good wages for the
work done.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
NAPOLEoN's TROUBLES.
His Royal Physician Diagnosed His
Trouble As scale Repercutes."

Napoleon Bopaparte, as First Con-
sui and as Emperor. was the victim of
malady which caused him to seek the
advice OF the most distinguished ply
.sicians OF Paris. 1t is a little shocking
to modern sensibilities to read that
these physicians. except Corvisart,
diagnosed the distinguished patients
malady as gale repercutee"-that is
to say, In idiomatlc English, the itch
struck in" 1t is hardly necessary to
say that no physician of to-day would
make so inconsiderate a diagnosis In
the case OF a royal patient. II by any
chance a distinguished patient were
afflicted with the itch, the sagacioas
physician would carefully hide the fact
behind circumlocutions. and proceed TO
eradicate the disease with all dispatch.
All OF which goes to show how easy
1t may be for a masked pretender to
impose on credulous humanity; for
nothing is more clearly established In
modern knowledge than the fact that
gale repercutee" was simply a name
to hide a profound ignorance; no such
disease exists, or ever did exist. Gale
itself is a sufficiently tangible reality.
to be sure; but 1t is purely local dis
ease of the skin. due ito a perfectly
definite cause, and the dire internal
conditions formerly ascribed to 1t have
really no causal connection with 1t
whatever. This definite cause, as
every one nowadays knows, is nothing
more nor less than microscopic Insect
which has found Judgment on the skin,
and 1t has burrowed and made itself at
home there. XIII that insect, and the
disease is no more; hence 1t has come
to be an axiom with the modern physf-
clan that the itch is one of the three or
four diseases that he is positively able
to cure, and that very speedily. But
1t was far otherwise with the physic-
ians of the first third OF our century,
because to them the cause of the dis
ease was an absolute mystery. -Har-
pers Magazine.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

The public library building In CHI
cago Is protected against the invasion
of fire from the outside by means of Il
80 called water curtain" AT the top
of the building Is system of tubes
through which water supplied from n
tank can be caused to flow over the
outside wallis. Recently the efficiency
of the water curtain was tested by the
occurrence of fire in large spice
mill adjoining the library building The
water being turned ON. the outer wallis
were Immediately covered with Il
liquid sheet which, rs the temperature
was low, became eventually n sheet of
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
THE MORALlST.

Industry gives the devil no elbow
room.
Culture will never convert tares into
wheat.
Many are sick of evil, without the
courage to be well.
True education never induces con-
tempt of the ignorant
To love upward is human, TO love
downward is divine
A good conscience Is the best armor
against calumny.
The Book Of Life will last when all
other biographies have burned.
The body is the temple, the heart IL
the altar, love Is the incense.
A crack In a wall may be very small.
sut you can see great deal through
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

Walter Wentworth 10 years old and
for many years professional contor-
toulst, Is IN New York looking for
some one to buy his body. He has long
been II wonder to medical men on ne
count of the wonderful pliability of
his frame, which lac has already sold
twice once to DIR. Cowcs of Detroit
and later to Or. Wilder of New York,
receiving In each case 500. Both these
medical men are dead, and now Went
worth Is looking for II third specu
lator.- Chicago Chronicle
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Our postamcea.

There We're 9o3 postotlices in 1900
Yoday we have i5,0oO-that Is, in
America alone. 1t took II letter IL
Gays to go from Philadelphia to Lex
ington, Ky; - days to Nashville The
cheapest letter postage was = cents,
and TO send letter more than 100
miles cost a shilling Three million
letters aud papers We're then seut in n
year At the present time the post
office handles about 30,oou,noo pieces
II mail in n single day. ladies Home
Journal
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Cninu Ia III. Nnr,bx,e..

Immigration Is going to the north
west Instead of the SOUTH" says n citl-
zen of ST. Paul. "rhe farmers of
Michigan and Indiana who have been
living on rented farms are buying land
In the Dakotas Land can be puI-
chased for 81 and SIS an acre. The
soil is good. the climate Is excellent
and the markets are better than they
have been Cor years The farmer can
do more on his 81 an acre farm than
he could ever hope to do ON the land
rented from others"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

You realty haven't any arst9elacy
in America, YOU know" said th2 SeH
tleman from Europe.
Il don't know, answered Miss cay
onne. I'VE have some very exclusive
blue bloodel families. You INA! mol
hear much of them, as they have re
sources, rs rule, and don't advertise.
We haven't yet quite reached the point
where aristucracy is followed as Il pro.
fesslon. Washington Star
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

The Boston mamma was thoroush-
ly out OF patience
"Thureau,' She exclaimed. shaking
her 3-year old son until his glasses fell
OFT. how often must | tell you not to
devour books with your elbows Oh the
table,"
10 have child who Is deficient in
manners is in some towns as sharp il
not sharper, than serpents tooth.
Detroit Journal
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
soIes Of Stone.

An inventor has hit upon a method
of putting stone soles on boots ami
shoes. He mixes a waterproof glue
with suitable quantity of clean
quartz sand and spreads 1t over the
leather sole used as a foundation.
These quartz soles are said to be very
flexible. and TO give the foot a firm
hold even on the most slippery surface.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Fhrm Hands Wanted.

Five thousand white farm hands are
wanted by the Hawaiian sugar planters
to meet the conditions imposed by the
Hawaiian government upon the grant
of privilege 10 import more contract
laborers from Japan, which conditions
are that an equal number Of C7"casians
shall be induced to imml to the
islands for every 5000 Asi~ ) here
after to be admitted.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
HIs Quirt Assurnmce.

"one finds very little real poetry in
print nowadays" remarked the young
woman.
Yes" answered Mr.. Bardly Scrlps
as lac pushed his hair back from his
brow it's the old story with me. IL
Il man wants TO be sure something Is
well done, he must do il himself. -
Washington Star.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Miss Wabash Amazed

What is that old proverb about the
moss and the rolling stone?" queried
the Chicago girl.
"A revolving fragment of the pale
ozoic age collects no eryptogamous veg
etation," replied her cousin from Bos-
ton.
Lands sakel" calculated the Chica-
go girl, and let 1t &c at that.-Chica-
go News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
r.aIns L.om IAilaaelphla ana Nele i0


Leave Lambertyile Tor Manunka Chunk 63S
1920 u N, I,37, 500 aud 1923 p III, SUNDAY. SOB
T. N. For Phillipshurg aud fas'on only t'2s
T. III week days,
s.io m week days, 40 p IN sundays. For Phil
Iipsburg aud Easton only, 1902 p m.
Arrive ut rhilipsburg 40 and ii.22 u. m, 2i2,
8 bS, 7.56 aud . 20 p. M. sunday go p. M.
Goa and 925 m. sunday, 926 pm.
Arrive Belvidcre 7bS. 1922 and 1l.63 III, lily
G.32. 96l p N, Sunday, 95l M.
Arrive Manunka Chunk sos, 1880 aud II 80 q IN,
325, G.3s and 9.bs p m. sunday, sbs m
Additional trains leave Beyidere for Manunta
Chunk 100 and $50 IN, and go y IA. sunday
700 N. Returning, leave Manunka Chunk Tor
Bclvldere s.26. l0is M, i20, 6i0 and 1000 T. ~.
Sunday, 1900 nm.
Freight or mixed trains leaving ManuukO
Chunk Mt 100 IN, Beiyldere 6I6 IN, Martins
| Creek 6.S6 NJ, arriving lehigh junction 6.b3 m
will carry passengers and make stops Mt flag sta
| tions North of Philpsburg.
! Passengers for Broad Street Station, Philndel
| phta, by traina leaving Manunka Chunk ~ a II
| daily and 1927, h2l y m week-days, aud leavin
| Phillipshurg SG0a IN daily, / 90 and o 6bp IN week
days 80 through without change at Irsn
| ton. through car for ManunkR chunk is at
| taehed TO trains leaving Broad Street station a
d.uo, 500 m, 1900 noon 1 03 aud 3 o., pm.
all other trains passengers 10 OF from lsroad ~
station change cars AT trenton
Connection Is made at manrusa Ctuus viz
delaware, Lackawsnna 4 Western H6iiroad; ID
high junction with Leklgh Valley iNhigh 4 Su
quehanna Morris EsSex, and Ees Jersoy Certr
Railroads. Al LRmbertsi lille " ith Elem gton Raj
fosa AtTrenton with tralns TO and from Ma
| York, Camden, &c.
For further information see timetables, shiS
can be sbtsiued at the tick ~ ohsces.
j. X. W0uD.
General Passenger Agent
j. n. HUTCHINSON,
Uonoral Manager
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Enlln,.ed Ah,ice

The oculist recommended that try
glasses
Did you take his advlce?"
"Yes. tried 'schooners' and
ponies "
Well, did they benefit your eye
sightf"
Yes; after trying them | can see
double. Chicago News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
The CompIacency of Things

The conductor of the train had an
sWered them civilly.
How kind everybody is to us!" whis-
pers the bride, with a happy smile.
Yes, even inanimate things are kind
to us!" cries the bridegroom, for the
car window had just submitted to be-
ing opened by him with little or no
resistanee.--DetroitI Journal
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Took the Hint.

What is your opinion of the open
door policy?"
1T depends on the season. Just now
l don't think it ought to be open"
Thereupon the man in the Office look
ed at the interviewer in such a mean
ing way that he Immediately went back
and closed it.-Chicago Post
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
As TO Hair and Whiskers.

by does a mans hair fall out be-
his whiskers?
cause IL is at least twenty years
a, New York Press,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
OF the canvasbaek Variety.

Nell Cat the football e)-Chollie
Dropkick is perfect duck.
Believes; sort of canvasback on
the extraordinarily Record.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Touch Enouoh,

'oh, Henry, don't cut your pie with
q knife"
Well. Eliza, you ought to be thank.
full don't call for can opener."-Chi.
cago Record.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

German tailor who died at Bres
lau In 1881 had such keen sight that
he was able TO see two of Jupiter's
four moons with the naked eye.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
Not Particular.

"She does all her own cooking, but
she says her husband has the appetite
of a bird"
Goodness she must mean an os-
trlch. '-Philadelphia Bulletin.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.

ESTATE or MARTHA NJ MAYOR, DECEASED.
Pursuant to the order of Paul A Queen, Sur
rogate Of the County of HunterdoH, made ON
the Twentieth day of March, A d, one
thousand nine hundred, notice is hereby Civ
en- to all persons having claims against the
estate of Martha NJ Naylor late of the
County of Hunterdon, deceased, to present
subscriber, Administrator Of said deceased,
within nine months from the date of said
order; and any creditor neglecting to bring in
and exhibit his or her claim under oath or
aiiirmation), within the time go limited, will
be forever barred of his or her action there
for against the said Administrator
Dated March 20, j. d, 1899
HAIRY A. MONTGOMERY,
Administrator
March 81, 1870
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

"Why do you carry your purse in
your hand instead of in your pockets"
he asked.
For economy" she replied. IF
pickpocket ever got into my pocket
he'd more than likely tear my gown.
while IL he grabs the purse out of my
hand the loss would be only 3 cents,
some samples and a postage stamp.r
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

Hailstoues IN India are said to be
from to 30 times larger than those In
England or America.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30
A Fraction.

What is a fraction?"
"A part of anything. sor."
Give me an example"
The sivinth OF June.
Times
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

"Jim Traynor begged to be permit.
ted TO come home from the Philippines
and get married"
"Yes"
I'm ten days tie was ready 10 go
back."--Cleyeland rlain Dealer.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1900-05-30

81 didn't know Mrs. Jones was so
full of malice"
whats the matter?"
"Why, when she left our fiat she
gave my wife her crayon portrait, four
feet square, on seven-foot EASEL
Chicago Record
New-York tribune., 1900-09-13
PROSPECTS IN NEW.YORK.

Chairman Hanna has reached Chicago from
his home in Cleveland, begun work at the Ma
tiOnal headquarters there and gives most salts
factory assurances of the diligence and alert
ness of the Republican campaign managers
He says: I'VE have a contest on our hands,
land it is a hard one, but nothing will be left
"undone that should be done to bring success. "
He points out the dangers of overcontidence
and urges that no man can afford to think
President Mckinley will be reelected anyway,
and for any reason himself neglect to vote
Intrusted as he is with the conduct Of the cam
paign, he naturally desires to gain all possible
assistance and arouse others TO do all possible
work, though he is careful to explain that he is
not an alarmist, but is merely anxious that
Republicans hold themselves ready to fight as
hard the desperate opposition. This policy
every Republican will heartily commend
When. however. Mr.. Hanna comes to speak of
conditions existing in New-York he gives some
indication of having been misinformed by those
on whom he relies for understanding of poll
tics in this State He says
l admit that New-York is doubtful In the
sense that the Republicans cannot set II down
as certain to give its electoral vote to Mckinley
We must fight for New-York. The Democrats
going 10 make a desperate fight to carry
that State. They have advantages they never
before had in a National campaign. They have
the control of over 500 600 900 of public reve-
nues. We know that Mr.. Croker has made a
deal with Mr.. Bryan. He will be loyal TO Bryan
and he will make his assessments upon all in
! the interests that are within his power. He can
! command ample funds TO wage a great cam
| paign He will DO It, and he will neglect no ad-
vantage he holds In his effort TO give Tammany
/ control of New-York State as we'll as New-York
/ City.
II is. of course. true that neither New-Y York
= nor any other State which is contested can be
New-York tribune., 1900-09-13
KRUGER NOW An oUTLANDER.

The formal proclamation of the reabsorption
of the Transvaal into the British Empire has
speedily been followed by the collapse of prac-
tically all that was left of the Boer force in
the field. Lydenburg, that mountain town
which. as we We're told was to become another
Croia, and TO hold out for years against the
invader. fell at the first touch. without a seri-
GUS struggle. Every important city and town
is now in British hands No attempt is made
TO exercise Boer sovereignty over the land
And finally, the sturdy old Presdent-or eX-
President. as must now call him-of the
Transvaal has fled from the land he could not
defend 10 seek refuge that Portuguese
soil which he so long and ardently coveted
for his own. 1t is not yet apparent whether
his escape from the Transvaal-or the Vaal
River Colony, as il is now to be called-was
effected in spite of or through the acquiescence
of the British. 1t seems rather strange that
the British could not head him off if they
really wanted to do so. AS "A matter of fact
there has been no report Of any serious at
tempt TO do so. And il is obvious, as we have
hitherto pointed out. that by letting him escape
TO foreign parts the British have avoided EN-
barrassments which would surely have befalen
them If they had captured him.
: However that may be- "Oom Paul" is now an
! Outlander. He has fed not only from Pre-
| toria, where be once promised to remain to
/ greet the British at his own front door hut
| from the country which he once ruled and has
sought asylum in a neighboring but alien land
and among a people even more alien to him
than the detested "RooineSs" That the Brit
ish will make any demand for his surrender II
| scarcely 10 be supposed. 1t does not appear tina
there is any good ground on which such a de
New-York tribune., 1900-09-13

The French Line steamer La Bretagne. Wnicn
sails at noon to-day. will carry among her cabin
passengers the following persons: G. d. de Boishe-
bert j. NJ Edmond Bedard. George kanzas. Mrs:
La Vergne. w. Moves. DR.. Z. E. Petrtt RoDsIt
Reiman and Panagiotis Tsikakos-
Among the passengers who arrived here last
night from LIVERPOOL and Queenstown on the
Cunard Line steamer Servia were the following
persons l.. A. Abbott. Daniel Buckley, Stewart F.
Carter, L. w. Crossley. David Greer Major Mac
kenZie Lionel Mapeson, w. NJ. PAUL, f. H. Roe
II. b. Stack. Lee j. Vance and John F. White.
Among the passengers the North German
Lloyd steamer Kaisern Maria Theresa. which ar
rived here yesterday afternoon. were Controller
Coler's brother, William y. Coler. and his wife and
Mrs. Frederick d. Grant. Some of the other pas
sengers the steamer Mr.. and Mrs j. L.
Appleton IL. K. Bennett. Mr.. and Mrs. j. n. Chubo,
Captain I. II. Cochrane. James c. Knox, Mrs. X
W. McCready, Miss Sadie Newburger, Graf Tel
fener, j. R. Wells. DR.. George Geffer. John NJ
Bauer, Charles w. Clark, +. G. Cabot. Paul Clay
ton, George Otis Draper. George s Fletcher. Alfred
" Loeb, DR.. E. Z. Montgomery, Marquis NJ: Pinar
del Rio G. II. Shaw. Arthur L. j. Smith, Guilford
5. Wood, Henry Walter and Otto Wissner.
Among those booked sail on the Hamburg
American liner Auguste Victoria to-day are the
following: Mr.. and Mrs John Bley Mrs c. W
Casgratn, the Misses CasGrain Mr.. and Mrs. @. A.
FarloW Oscar Henriques. Samuel Morreii. Secre-
tary or the United States Embassy at Berlin; Juan
de Dios Leon Maurice Rose and Harry Taylor.