Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-05-22


Tom took her to the receiving ward.
where there was doctor who had moth
ing else to do.
Here's case, doe said the police
man.
Il amt a the doctor began. Then
he saw the girls eyes. Let me see,' he
continued.
Pretty bad was the doctors com
mcnt Then he got some knives, a little
bottle Of chlOroform. and some band
ages. You must help me- he said TO
the girl
She aided bravely, though it made her
very pale to see the sharp knives ampu-
tating the leg. In few minutes it was
all over and the cat was partly recover
ing from the aenesthetic.
Now you can take your kitty home
with YOU" the doctor said.
1T amt mine the girl said. Il DIES
found it. Now 90 take care Of it. Dood-
by"
The policeman and doctor made faces
Society for the Prevention Of Cruelty to
Animals.
Msinformed.-Stran this Mrs.
Slimdiet's boarding house,
Mrs. S. (sharpiy)-'This is not a board
ing house, sir
Hem. Mp~: nave the wrong number
Can you tell me where Mrs. Slindet
lives?''
i am Mrs. Slimdiet'
Indeed. And you do not take board
ers?''
Certainly not. This is private house,
sir-a home, not a boarding house"
Then / have been misinfOrmed."
L should say so. Being lonely, l take
a few guests at IS a week: Would you
like TO look at the rooms ?"-New York
Weekly.
There arc probably no two men III Al
bany so nearly alike and so much unlike
as ex-Gov. David 3. Hill and Gov. The
edore Roosevelt, relates the Saturday
Evening Post. Both men are fighters.
although their methods differ. Both are
brave and eloquent, and each received
his office from a political party with
which he in many respects differed. The.
two governors often meet. and there Is
usually little quiet fun between them
when they come together. Both men
have the gift of saying sharp things.
Not long ago the New York newspaper
men gave banquet at Stanwix hall. in
Albany. and among the guests Of honor
were the two governors. Col. Roosevelt
came first. He wore an evening suit
and his famous brown sombrero, made
famous by the Rough Riders 1t was Il
combination costume at once original and
picturesque. Among the last of the
guests to arrive was Mr.. Hill. who was
conventionally attired, even to his silk
hat
"Ahr' excleimed Col. Roosevelt. in his
peculiar staccato manner, as he grasped
Mr.. Hills hand, now we have with us
a real Albany swell Gov. Hill is the
only man here tonight with silk hat
I've got SLOUGH hat myself re-
turned Mr. Hill, softly, but | left it at
home. I've given up wearing it since
ont of hn 1flI- o1.ti
Then dinner was announced and the
remainder of the evening passed pleas
antiy.
The late Sir William Lockhart's ia
Their, Rev. Lawrence Lockhart, d. d.,
before his succession to the family cs
tate. in Lanarkshire, was parish minister
Of Inchinnan, in Renfrewshire. says the
London Chronicle. When on his success
on TO the estates, he was ''fiitting' from
Inchinnan, he left a number Of things
behind him, stored in a garnet. Some
time afterWard he wrote to his successor
to ask him whether the things in the gar
ret were ''all right" and, in particular,
whether they were well aired" In re-
ply he was told:
The hsngs IN the garnet arc all right
well aired and quite dry-sermons and
ell
1.-THE talk about ante-election promises
reminds me of the experience of man
who | knew at my old home" said VIII
liam Snyder in the Birmingham (Ala.D
Age-Herald. He was q candidate for
constable, and just before election day |
asked him concerning his prospects. oh.
| am certain Of a two-thirds majority
he answered most cheerfuly.
What causes you to feel SO positively
certain" | asked.
I've got the promises.
You place the proper value on ciec-
ton promises, it is hoped? | ventured 10
say.
Sure" he said, sure. Everybody ha.
promised to vote for me; but count one
third of the voters as liars. The truthful
two-thirds will vote for me-
In the election the trusting man did
not receive any votes at all. Seeing him
| asked him about it.
Il expressed to you the opinion, said
he. that one,third Of the voters were
liars, didn't L?
THAT'S what you said' he was as
sured.
May amend my observation?
Certainly
'''Then I strike out "one-third' and
substitute 'all''-thus, all the voters Of
our town are liars
$50 saying, the defeated one made
Decline for Il drink"
Archbishop Temple of Canterbury is
always made impatient of bores, espe-
cially clerical bores, says a correspond
ent of the New York Tribune. One of
the clergy of his diocese who has pest
cred him good deal recently wrote an
Unfortunately long letter describing a pic
ture which he proposed to put up in the
chancel Of the church, and asking per
mission to do so. By the time his grace
reached the end of the epistle his pa
tionce was quite exhausted, and he re
piled on a postcard:
Dear Rlank-Hang the picturc"'
The clergyman is still wondering how
he ought to regard the reply.
There is a crowd of boys in the east
ern part of town that makes life miser-
able for the neighbOrs, says the Detroit
IN, oldorl1r Loo