The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1900-11-23
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ington Star
They're going to run the new hotel
. on the European plan" "Heavensl
/ hope the plan doesn't include tipsg-
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Resort Hotelkeeper-Any guests in
this evenings train? Bus Driver-No-
body to speak Of Only a single trunk
woman and u grip gent.-Boston Tran
script
Snarley-What's self-esteem? Vow
It's something we all hate to see in
some one else, but which is a virtue il
we possess it NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
Herald.
What is an optimist?' asked the lad.
IAN optimist," answered Mr.. Brykins.
as he took a dyspepsia tablet. 'is in
most cases a COMPOUNDED prevaricatOr."
Washington Star.
Edith (coylyJ-What is it the poet
says about young mans fancies" in
the spring? Backward Lover-Why-
r-really-I-er--leave all that to me
tailor, We know.-Puck.
you seem to be very much interest
ed in that couple in the middle Of the
floor" Yes you look at them and see
if you can figure out which it is that
can't dance. Chicago Record.
I'm thinking of going to the Paris
exposition. | wonder how much it
would cost me- THAT depends" DE
ponds on what?" ION how much you
take with you" Philadelphia Press.
Hicks-The easy writer's have a deal
to say about the dead of night" When
is that, wonder? Wicks-The dead Of
night, l suppose, is when everybody is
buried in Standardization Transcript.
Even the general that never wins a
battle can beat sometimes" remarked
BeeehwOod. What are you driving
atY asked Homewood. He can beat
a misunderstanding Chronicle-Tele-
graph
What did Aunt Minerva say about
the shirt-waist MANI" "She said now
he had to keep his belt in the right
place all the time he'd find out he
wasn't any smarter than woman."-In-
dianapolis Journal
Amelia, whena letter came from YOU
while you were away | did not read it
for a day at least" what was that
for, EDGAR Don't you see? 1 saved
one days interest on the money you
asked for.'-Chicago Record.
Language" quoted Willie Wishing
ton, was given for the concealment Of
thought" Indeed rejoined Miss
Cayenne languidly. Permit me to con-
graduate you on being so perfect a
master of English. Washington Star
did you have any words with your
mistress which caused you to leave
your last placer "Niver a word
Shure an OF locked her in the bath
room and TUX me things and slipped
out as quiet as yez phase. Harper
Bazaar.
William, poor man came along
and asked for a hat" What did you
doy Il gave him your Sunday hat
What on earth did you do that forY'
We'll, l knew you would need your
old one to wear when you go fishing
Chicago Record.
PA" asked little Willie, "how long
Is a 'decadeT" That depends, my
son. In the census department a dec
ade means ten years. but to the women
who hand their ages in to the census
man it means anything from 0 to 1O."-
Philadelphia Press.
Mr. Henpeck-The doctor says alb
sOlutely must go away next week for a
rest. Mrs. Henpeck-Goodness l can't
possibly manage to get away to go
with you then. Mr., Henpeck-Um-ms
guess the doctor must have known
that.-Philadelphia Press.
Mr.. Gump Ito teacher)-No. l don't
want you to teach my son any gram
mar Not bit of it. Teacher-But-
but-this is unsual. sir. May / inquire
your reasons? Mr.. Gump-I intend
that he shall be a writer of popular
songs.-Baltimore American.
The Seaman-Have you ever been on
battleship when she clears for ac-
ton! The Landsman-No. "Wen. it
Is the most thrilling and impressive
moment you can conceive" "Oh, 1
don't know. Have you ever seen golf
cluo champion get ready to driver
Life.
Bianehe-Was Mrs. Gewgaw's gar
uen party "wipe-off affair? Lillian
NO; 1t seemed to me more of a tag
end" party. Blanche-A ''tag-end" mar
w Liiian-Yes; lot of people who
were invited only because a lot of other
people wouldn't come. "-Indianapolis
Journal.
A Frenchwoman NJ o,roo. ,.z,