Evening star., 1900-12-15
WAkING BRINGS REGRET

It was the day before Christmas. and the
emergency reporter, who is a space worker
at column rates. was gloomily figuring on
the small size of his weeks string while
no nodded drowsily with his hsady only
about two=feet removed from the kissing
steam radiator. While thus he nodded the
city editor, whose manner toward the
emergency reporter had seemed somewhat
chilling for some time previously, ap-
preached him andjdrew up a chair along
side of him
Pete" 81 I'D the city editor in subdued but
cordial tone that quite surprised the emer-
gency reporter. I've decided to let you
have the tsp-notch assignment for tomor-
row. / have concluded that we haven't
been giving you sufficient opportunity to
prove your real worth, and so from this
time on I'm going to pass the big stuff your
need to say that, If you fulfill our expecta-
tions, I'll see to 1t that you get douhle-col-
umn rates for your matter. Tut. tut. tut
now, no thanks, if you please" continued
the city ed1tory, observing that the emer-
gency reporter was moved almost to tears.
Now, the reason 1 am picking you out
for the top-noteh assignment tomorrow
aside from the feeling that we've been ne
giecting you-is that you're the best short
hand man on the staff You want to keep
very quiet about this assignment. We've
had the exclusive tip. and we want to beat
the other papers all to pieces on 1t.
Catch me saying a word about IT.!
fervently put in the emergency reporter.
dabbing at his eyes in the emotion which
he felt over the tardy recognition which
was being extended to MIN.
We'll" went on the city editor, heres
the assignment. The bishop of a famous
western diocese, who has been visiting IN
Washington for some months on mission
hitherto unknown. but which Is now, of
course, obvious, Is going to deliver the
Christmas sermon at the z Street Church
tomorrow. 1t seems that his mission In
Washington has been to gather material
with reference to life in the capital and
his sermon tomorrow is to be sensational
presentation of this material He's going
to attack the social conditions prevailing In
Washington with sharp stick, and his
utterances. as reported by you, Will prop
ably be sent all over the country after we
publish them. The sermon is bound TO Gre
ate tremendous furry, and we want 1t in
full If 1t makes half a dozen pages AS
matter Of fact, it's likely to be pretty long
the bishop has a bit OF reputation 1oI
prolixity-and you want to get every word
of 1t. There'll be no other reporter present,
as we have the exclusive information that
the sermon Is to be delivered. You'll nave
to tackle the transcription of your steno-
graphic notes as soon as the sermon is over,
whichll probably be about l O'Clock, TOT
we want early copy. You won't nave 10
typewrite the stuff yourself. All you ~
have to do will be to read off your notes TO
half a dozen typewriters that'n report here
tomorrow for that purpose. ThereH De
something besides your space rates In your
envelope If you do this assignment saus-
factorily. Tush. man. l don't want any
thanks as l told you before. Just want 10
give YOU this little lift that you deserve.
Whereupnn the city editor hurried out OF
the room, leaving the emergency reporter
almost dumfounded over the great luch
that had come his way. He didn't waste
anv time in hugging himself over 1t, now
ever. but went out. jumped on a car ana
rode to the residence of the minister at
which the bishop from the west VINO was
to deliver the sensational sermon was stop
ming The emergency reporter was prompt
ly ushered into the study or the plshop'
whom he found to be a large ge1llai @ nlan'
not above the enjoyment OF good cigar.
The emergency reporter told the blshop that
he had been assigned to report the sermon.
and yentured to request the DishOp not "
go too fast during the progress OF the ssi
mon. for, added the emergency reporter
IT am lust bit out of practice on my
cb,rthsnd and l don't believe / can write
much faster than 800 words minute III my
rusty state ,, .r
"Mv SON the bishop replied to this, Il
like the looks of your frank. open @ couli
tanance You strike me as being deserV-
ing Young man. and therefore Will inform
YOU that I have a typewriter copy OF t!le
sermon | am to deliver tomorrow naVe
memorized the settnon-lt VIII ,>ar,er .lahe anuu'
and | shall deliver it precisely as nave
had it typewrirten. However, l desire 70
keep the manuscript intact Ii you Will
promise me to give it back to me tomorrow
evening | shall let you have 1t now, and
that Will save you all of the arduous lapof
of reporting 1t in shorthand and transcrlp-
Ing your notes..
5Wau If things aren't coming my way
now. they never did, that's ALL" said the
emergency reporter TO himself, and then
he quickly assured the benign bishop that
the manuscript of the sermon would be as
saIe in his hands as If deposited In the
Bank of England, whereupon the bishop
went to his desk. took out the bulky mass
of neatly typewriter pages and handed IL
to the emergency reporter. The emergency
reporter with additional promises to re-
turn the sermon on the following evening,
withdrew.
He took the typewriter sermon to his
room, lighted a pipe, and looked the matter
over He found that the city editor had
not been mistaken in his estimate of the
sensation which the sermon would be liable
to create. 1t was tremendous attack on
administrative and social circles In WASH
ington. Inc emergency reporter donned
his smoking jacket and slippers. busted off
his typewriter and went to work at copy
ing the sermon.~He worked steadily at it
until 3 o clock on Christmas morning, when
he finished the job.
He remained in bed until noon on the fol-
lowing day. gloating over his luck In hav
ing secured the manuscript Of the sermon
and thus avoided the necessity or pOthOOk-
ing it. Then he got up, ate hearty break
fast and figured on his cuff with reference
to what double space rates for the sermon
would amount to- Then he went to the
room Of friend and played pinochle for an
hour or So at the end of which time he put
on his great coat. stuck his neat manu-
script in his pocket and repaired to the
office Of his paper. He stepped on the ele-
vator to go up and make his triumphant
appearance before the city editor when the
main cable holding the elevator broke and
1t fell down, down-and the emergency re-
porter woke up, his head having bumped
against the hot steam radiator.
"Um-there you are said the city editor
in an unpleasant tone, coming into the
room just then and surveying the emer-
gency reporter langudly. Haven't got
much left on the book for you to do to-
ACCOMPLISHMENTS are all given out that
amount to anything-but the Shepherds of
Ezekiel are going to have a little Christ
mas tree blowout tonight believe they
have little hall somewhere up near the
nav" yard-and you may as we'll skip up
there and get the names of the Kris Krin-
gle, and the ladies who decorated the tree,
and that sort o. thing. Few lines ought to
cover 1t, just to show 'em that were not
overlooking EN-. By the way, that was a
pretty poor and fiimsy story you turned in
a while ago about that fire on X street.
You'll have to smoke UP. son, If you expect
to stay on the staff. And that'll be about