Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1900-12-26
and when you are through you will be
ready to step into a position as me-
chanical engineer anywhere.
H WIDOWS MIGHT.
BY George BeardsIey.

If Joe rswer yes. it will defeat
him; and if he answers no, it will snow
him under"
So said the politicians OF both par
ties. It did, indeed, look as if Joe had
struck a snag. 1he poser was this:
will you, Joseph Smith, if elected to
the Nebraska Legislature, vote for the
repeal of the,beet sugar bounty?" The
shrewd Republican editor of the Platte
vile News asked this question in his
paper. Each week the populist canid-
date let pass withcIt answering SEEM
ed to nearly every che, including the
Widow Plumb herself, TO take him just
one week nearer defeat. The Widow
Plumb, by the by, according to one ru-
NOR, stood ready to become the little
ex-Mormon's eighth wife in case he
should be elected. AS to this, however,
gossip w2verei; sometimes. instead Of
Old Joe, it connected the name Of bach
elor OXmeyer with the well-to-do w.d-
ow'S. Oxmeyer was manager Of the
beet sugar factory. ard TO the ordinary
widow ne was S much TO be deslled
above any little bankrupt politician as
are the judgments Of the Lord 10 be
desired above fine gold. But the
widow, as she put it, possessed enough
OF the worlds wealth to tide her over
the longest possible drouth, and her
ambition now was a political ambition.
In fine, rumor probably spoke By the
card when it declared the widow would
have him if the election went Joe's
way.
NOW, if Joe stood squarely on the
State platform of his party, he should
favor the repeal of tie sugar bounty,
i or the populists in Nebraska at large
were d~enouncing the bounty law as
special legislation. But Platte town
ship happened to be the seat of one Of
tae new sugar factories, and the far
mers there had taken enthusiastically
to beet culture. The manufacturers
threatened that il the bounty was dis
continued they would close their es-
Establishments. Nobody, therefore, in
Joe's township was in favor of the re-
peal. Yet ii ne decided for the bounty
ne would repuGlate the very battle sio-
gan OF his party, and the populists out
side OF Platte township would either
scratch his name from their ballots or
stay at home on ele, Ion day an allow
his defeat by default. In this predica-
ment the old codger lay low on the
subject of the sugar bounty. AS he
said to the widow, "let on as II he
DIDN'T know the News man was after
MIN WIN mis- doggone question. Be
lore the world Joe showed no concern.
SAID Somerville, the populist chair
man: "Pahaw! you can't feaze Joe
Smith with a little measly question
mark-he's been married too many
tines
but the young professor is spouting
every day said the secretary of the
committee. ihe Republican candidate.
old Joe's opponent, was Chicory, the
vigorous yodng principal OF the Platte
vile school. And he repeats the edi-
tors question: "TVill you, Josepn
smith, or will you not, vote for the re-
peal OF the beet sugar bounty if you
are elected to the leglslature?'
20, said these managers to the
easySolng candidate, you underesti-
mate the Importance of the News
mans question"
Not at ALL" replied Joe. ONLY.
am not going to say no, and I'm not
going to say yes; I've got to think up
something between the two. But
meanwhile I'm not going to look wor-
ried, would your"
The fact is, Joe, that query is cal
culated to catch you comm and catch
you goin. You're beat if you say no:
you're beat if you say yes; you're beat
If you keep on keeping still"
But old Joe only scratched his back
with the crook of his cane and looked
amused. Says he. Ernest, Id feel
sheepish if | was in your shoes-chair-
mai Of the committee and the Pops
threatened with the throw-down Just
on account of a little pestiferous ques-
ton that doesn't amount to a load Of
corn cobs. When l was chairman we
didn't have any such nonsense
Thus Joe went blandly on. talking
crops and general adversely to the
farmers, and joking with his manag-
eTs. The man never seemed to doubt
for amoment, but that he would land
on his feet. And, as he intended they
should, many of his followers partook
or the old fellows Said
they, "Joe's got a way of comm up
smilin', wait and see" But the sands
were slipping through the glass and
there would not be many days more
to wait. November was now but ten
days off. The edition. and the young
professor was exulting in the advant-
age they seemed to have gained. The
News was o given over TO broad
sides. One week the editorial page
would consist solely of one great in
terrogation point in the center Of the
page, addressed simply ITO Hon. JOS
eph Smith" The next week the page
would be covered in gigantic black
letter type with the fateful question:
WILL YOU JOSEPH SMITH" etc.
The Republican managers issued great
posters bearing the question which
made votes silently, looking down
from billboards and crossroads tree
trunks.
Joe, having nothing to answer yet.
retained his front of jolly self-com-
posture, and drove about the county
looking to his political fences. his
blind eye always K the question.
Sundays he was back in Plattville 0 n
sulting with his nag and with the
Widow Plumb. The managers thought
he vas not keen enough about an
swering the opposition S question, and
too keen about the widow. Among
themselves they grumbled a good deal
against Joe's time-consuming court
ship of the widow, to the neglect. Is