Vilas County news. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1896-1927, 1900-03-19
DOBLEY GETSA COOK
SHOWS HIS WIFE HOW TO DEAL
WITH SERVANT QUESTION.
HAD THEORIES UPON 1T
Pays Visit to an Intelligence Office
and Has a Pleasant Half Hour-In-
teresting Way in Which His The
cries Worked in Actual Life
Something of Lottery

OIl6S w OIhCu Ill ACIudl I11lG-
Something of Lottery.
Mrs. Dobley gazed helplessly over
the chatting dish at her husband. They
we're breakfasting quite Informally,
owing to the fact that the cook had
been discharged the preceding after
noon, at Mr.. Dobley's request. For
my part" said Mrs. Dobley, Il al
ways believe in waiting until one has
secured another girl. It is a dreary
thing to have to breakfast on scram-
bled eggs and rolls and coffee, with
nothing better in sight for week"
What nonsense" said Mr.. Dobley
"You can put an advertisement in
the paper and have a hundred and one
cooks to choose from in the morning!"
That's just the trouble!'' said his
wife; eff they only wouldn't come in
schools like whales and porpoises it
wouldn't be so dreadful! They come
la dozen at time, and begin to ask
questions until you don't quite know
If they are hiring you, or you are en-
gaging them You see, I've been
through it and you haven't. After
ALL Belinda wasn't so bad!"
Nov look here, Honora You had
to admit that she never had anything
on time!'
sfSha was late occasionally -
"She broke dishes!"
Eyes: she did destroy some of the
china and glass;
''She lost silver and ruined the
table linen in the laundry. I'm quot
ing your own words, Honora."
ooh, yes; she was a little careless"
"She not only generously sampled
the decanters on the sideboard, but
she insisted on filling them up with
water when she had imbibed most of
their original contents.
ooh, all cooks drink. You can't ex-
pect impossibilities!
'She fought with the butchers boys
and all the different tradesmen until
they refused to serve u.s.
Belinda had quick temper"
1--WE had agreed to put UP with all
these trifing Irregularities, but when
she reached a point that she felt it
her duty to stand at the head of the
kitchen stairs armed with a chopping
knife and rolling pin threatening the
other servants and daring me to dis
arm her, I considered it was about
time to call halt"
"To call policeman, you mean"
suggested Mrs. Dobley. 7 don't see
why you made such dreadful time
over it. The idea of having a patrol
wagon come up to our door,
81 have yet to see the day." said
Mr. Dobley, when | would lay my
hand upon woman, no matter what
her station in life might be. [ re-
gard Belinda, from what I have heard
of her, as being too fiery and untamed
for domestic use. Personally, |
wouldn't know her if | saw her; but
cannot see in selecting those people
why you do not go more by facial
characteristics; study up Lombroso-
look at their ears and their foreheads,
and take their measure, as it were.'
Cooks all look exactly alike! They
are all large, aggressive, patron1zlng
and impairment They ask all sorts
of questions and they snap one UP like
dragons if they are questioned at all.
I confess I'm afraid of them
ooh, this servant girl question! This
servant girl question: exclaimed Mr..
ooI1 tn
deal with! The trouble with all you
women is that you begin by being too
conciliatory You should be naughty
and domineering. That's the only
sort Of thing that goes with that par
ticular species. 1t cows them at once
1t is like tanning wild beast by look
ing it firmly in the eye
ssWell, [ never should look a wild
beast in the eye, or even a mouse.
I'd run!'' concluded Mrs. Dobley, land
that's the way l feel about cooks.
"You should bring auto-hypnotism
into play said Dobley. tits very
simple. Make up your mind to con-
troll them. Then you have 'em!"
II don't understand those things,
said Mrs Dobley. II don't see why
you didn't come downstairs and hyp-
notize Belinda
''She had a chopping knife with her.
Metal counteracts the hypnotic cur
rent. But I'll give you an instance.
Look directly in my eyes, Mrs. Dob
ley"
Mrs Dobley looked at him intently,
and Dobley made passes in the air
with his hands over the table while
Mrs. Dobley watched him in amaze
ment Look at mel" he commanded,
Swapping his fingers.
81 am looking at you as hard as ]
can said Mrs. Dobley.
pass the butter" said Dobley. Mrs.
Dobley did so. "The rolls!" shouted
Dobley-|the eggs-the toast!'
"There is no toast" said Mrs. Dob
ley. ;,
There said Dobley triumphant
ly. eff you had only kept your mind