davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
DID THE HANDSOME THING.
A Marrying Minister VINO Found NO
Fault with Gambling
Phrases.

In a volume of "reminiscences just pub
Iished entitled: "The Wedding Day IN Lat
erature and Art" minister relates his ex'
perience with two weddings IN the same
town on the same day, one in the morn
ing, one in the afternoon. The first wed
ding fee / received was SIC" he says, "a very
large remuneration for the place and PEG,
pie. After the second wedding the best
man called me into private room and
thus addressed me:
"'What's the tax, parsonp
"'Anything you like, or nothing at all, !
answered. Qhave frequently received moth
" Now said he, we want to do this
thing up in style, but | have had no ex
perence in this business and do not know
what is proper. You name your figure
81 suggested that the legal charge was
two dollars" w
Pshaw,' he said. This amt legal. We
want to do something handsome.
$50 ahead and do it, / said. Whereupon
he reflected a moment and then asked me
how much had received for the wedding
of the morning.
"'Ten dollars ! replied.
"His face frightened at once. Here was
a solution to the difficulty.
"I'll see his ante, he. remarked, raise
him FIVE dollars and CALL Whereupon he
handed me SIS"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

| tower again, and IT, would mean
trouble But then he didn't know all
this, and digging his toes into the
/ laps of the sheet iron he pulled him
self up hand-over-hand. He was wet
to the skin and the rope was slippery,
| but he didnt give up. At last he was
right under Jim's seat, and called to
/ him, but il was no use-Jim was un-
conscious.
The good angels protected him, |
guess, or he couldn't have done what
he did next. He pulled himself up to
| the seat and stood on either side of
! the man. Then he took the slack rope
and tied it around Jim until there was
| less chance OF fall to the floor.
Loosening the rope where it was
wound around the paint hook to keep
| il from slipping, it'll by little he let
! himself and Jim down. 1t took long
time because he could use but little
rope at once, and there was danger of
| the burden sending them downward
! toe fast.
"They did fall at the last, but il so
| happened that they were only five feet
! up, and it did not hurt much. Three
! inches of water from the storm was
on the bottom of the standpipe when
! they landed, and into il they splashed.
| The rain was still coming in, and be-
| tween the storm and the water on the
| floor they got well soaked, 1t kept
the boy from fainting, but it didn't
do Jim any good.
They dragged him out through the
hole in the bottom of the standpipe
and took him TO the hotel after the
boy had given the alarm.
Then they sent for a doctor from
| the city, and for me. | nursed Jim
| for three weeks before he knew me.
| The doctor said he had enough cleo
| tricity in his system TO run tele-
/ graph office, but that was an exag
/ geration He couldn't have handled
much more, though.
"Jlm came to after awhile-the rub
Der paint was all that saved him, the
paint and the boy. He couldn't do it
again in a thousand times.
Yes. he recovered, but ! am alone
in the business for lime. Jim's TAX
ing three months off o steady his
nerves.
THE boy? Funny thing about that.
| | got letter from him yesterday ask
/ ing if l wouldn't take MIN as an APP
I prentice in standpipe painting and
/ steeple gliding. You'd have thought
he'd seen all of this business he want
( ed to-now, wouldn't ?'-Chicago
Daily Record.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
POTATO LEAF BLIGHT.
This Disease May BE Held In Check
by the Application of bordeaux
Mixture.

This disease is widespread and de-
structive 1t is confined to the leaves
and green stems. and appears about
the time the tubers begin 10 form, but
may be noticed earlier if the growth of
the plants has been checked in any
way. The first Indication of its pres
ence is the appearance on the leaves of
grayish brown spots, which soon be-
come hard and brittle. The disease
progresses rather slowly, the spots
gradually becoming larger, especially
along the edges of the leaflets. At the
end of ten days to two weeks, half of
the leaf surface may be brown, with
cred and brittle, while the rest is OF a
yellowish green color, Three weeks or
a month may elapse before all the
leaves succumb. The tubers stop
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

theater burned. We were all praying
for it was blustery and cold-a sort of
damp cold that penetrates even TO the
bones. But just after midnight we were
called out, and we worked all night to
save adjoining property. The theater
was doomed when we got there. But
il was on Pennsylvania, in the heart
of the city, near two prominent hotels,
and surrounded by business houses.
We saved all of that property. But it
was night of exhaustion and terror
to all of us on account of the weather.
"Well, I'm glad it is all over. But,
to tell the truth, | really enjoyed the
work. the excitement of it and the feel
ing that we were heroically endeavor-
ing to save life and property for our
fellow men. There is great deal of
pride in the breast of true fireman.
lie feels that he is public benefactor
all the time; and let me tell you that
| have seen many fireman do deeds
which would give him nero's crown
if done in battle"
Then. turning from the subject of a
fireman's life in the early days, Mr..
Clark said: ''Some evening / will tell
you about my experience as page boy
in the house of representatives. ] was
there when some of the greatest men
in the land were members. EX-Presi-
dent John Quincy Adams was one of
them. | was there when Morrill,, of
Vermont; Sumner, of Massachusetts;
Breckenridge, of Kentucky, and Brooks,
of South Carolina, came to congress.
Brooks was the man who assaulted
Sumner with cane. All four of the
men whom | have named were physical
giants. Sumner was the hanGsomest
of them ALL He was a natural athlete.
If he had taken different course in
life he could have whipped a regiment
of Sullvans, Corbetts and Sharkeys.
III tell you about those men some even
ing soon" SMITH d FRY
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

There is more Catarrh in this section OF
the country than all other diseases put to.
gether, and until the last few years was
supposed to be incurable. For great many
years doctors pronounced it a local disease,
and prescribed local remedies, and by con.
stantly failing to cure with local treatment,
pronounced it incurable. Science has proven
catarrh to be constitutional disease, and
therefore requires constitutional treatment.
Halls Catarrh Cure, manufactured by +. j..
Cheney & Co., Toledo, Ohio, is the only
constitutional cure on the market 1t is
taken internally in doses from 10 drops to a
teaspoonful 1t acts directly on the blood
and mucous surfaces of the system. They
offer one hundred dollars for any case it
fails to cure. Send for circulars and testi'
monials. Address F. j. Cheney & Co., To-
ledo, o. Sold by Druggists, 75c.
Halls Family Pills are the best.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
when You Co to FLORIDA

you enhance the pleasure of the trip by 60
ing over the Queen & Crescent Route and
its connections via Cincinnati. Careful at
Ia Ia cartel are not surpassed in the best
hotels. Your rest is unbroken on the
smooth, rock ballasted roadway. You are
not annoyed by change of ears. Fatigue
vanishes before some of the finest natural
scenery in America.
duced rates. Why not write US about it?
Only "a hours Cincinnati TO Florida. Di-
rect connections at Port Tampa and Miami
at Steamers Wharf for Key West, Nassau
and Havana. We quote rates gladly. Hand
some printed matter sent free to inquirers.
w. c. Rinearson, Gen'l Pass'gr Agent, Gin
cipnati q
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
LOW RATES SOUTH
CHICAGO s. EASTERN ILLINOIS
RAILROAD.

Winter Tourist Tickets are on sale daily
via the above line to all the winter resorts
in the South and Southeast. These
tickets are sold at very low rates and are
limited for return until May 81, 1901.
Homeseekers' Tickets are on sale on First
and Third Tuesday each month, to all the
principal points South and Southeast at
one fare plus $500 for the round trip.
Tickets are limited for return 81 days
from date of sale.
One-Way Settlers Tickets are on sale First
and Third Tuesday each month, TO many
points in the South and Southeast at
greatly reduced rates.
If you are contemplating trip TO the
South or Southeast advise any agent of
the Chicago g. Eastern Illinois Railroad.
who will be pleased to quote you rates,
send you time tables, make sleeping car
reservation and give you any further
information you may desire.
G. L. STONE,
Gen. Pass 6 Tiki. Agt, Chicago
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

ice The fire lasted from Wednesday
morning until Friday afternoon, and
smoldered for some time after that.
The heat was so intense and awful
that firemen al the nozzle could only
play on the flames for a couple of
minutes at time. Then they would
retire almost roasted, and others
would take their places. The steam
engines kept putting and blowing con-
stantly and the water supply of the
city was almost oyertaNed.
"All along G street the houses were
in great danger. The Baltimore en-
gines were worked for their protec-
ton. There was a large stable on
that street which was in danger all
of the time. and, if il had caught fire.
that whole section of the city would
have been in danger. The Baltimore
boys protected that stable and adj
joining buildings, and kept them sat
urated with water. The flying Gin
ders fell on roofs which were wet
enough all the time TO put them out.
The fire was finally stopped at the
corner of seventh and q street.
checked. headed Off and driven back.
But il was the most terrific work that
ever experienced. The model-room
of the patent office was practically
eaten out by fire before we could get
there with our nozzles. II was a tre-
mendous loss TO the government. We
could do nothing to save the model
room, and il was all that we could do
to save the building which IS the
home of the interior department.
'The other government department
buildings have been free from fires,
excepting the old navy department
| building on Seventeenth street. That
fire occurred so long ago that | have
/ forgotten the date. Besides, it didn
amount to much. for we put il out in
| a very short time.
Did You ever hear of the burning OF
she Smithsonian institution That oe.
/ Cured about dinner time in February
1850. or 1867. Talk about cold weather!
That Was hummer. We worked IN
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

wind as well. Brt cyclones dom
come out of the northwest in the
prairie states, ard there wasn't any
danger on that score
"The first Jim knew of the storm
was when the tossing, foam-like edge
that races ahead of these western
showers went over the top of the
pipe. But he was painting halfway
up the lJ0-foot wall, and not knowing
the country. didn't think it meant
anything. More clouds went over and
then came a change of the wind that
made the tall tower tremble and
scared Jim al last. He tried to loosen
his rope from the pulleys and go
down, but before he did it there was
crash as if a hundred cannon had
been let off at once. Inc folks of the
town were all in their houses, and
when they heard it every one expect
| ed TO see his roof come tumbling in.
But it didn't. The lightning struck
the standIipe. Now if it had been
| full of water nothing would have been
hurt, but it was empty-and Jim was
hanging inside it.
| at is hard to tell just what hap
pened just then. For my part | think
the smoke of the burning paint and
the blaze of the lightning must have
maze it a mighty gorgeous spectacle,
but there wasn't anybody there to see
| it but Jim-and he couldn't.
"He had a way of winding the ropes
around his legs as he sat on his little
swing board at the end of the long
hanger and must have been swinging
free from the iron walls when the
stroke came. Then there was the
thickness of rubber paint between
him and the electricity, and altogeth-
thing else-it shocked MIN so badly
that he fell forward and hung in his
guy ropes, limp as rag.
81 was telling you about the boys
well, they didn't show up that after
noon either, none of them but the
Smith boy. He was going home from
! school when the storm broke and was
right under cottonwood tree across
from the standpipe when the light
ming struck. He was afraid to go on
and thought that 1t would be safer in
1
tempting fate that way. So he
crawled down through the little hole
at the bottom of the pipe and got in
side. Looking up he saw Jim, swing
| ing back and FORTH limp and helpless.
knowing nothing. and for all the boy
could tell, he might be dead.
1T was raining cats and dogs out
side by this time, just sheets of water
and lots of it coming into the stand
pipe. The boy was afraid to go after
help, for Jim might drop any minute,
and to drop so or 60 feet on a sheet
iron floor with stone and concrete I'M
der it can't be done but once in this
world.
Frank had watched the work so
much that he knew how the ropes
were fastened in the pulleys. and as
| one long rope always touches the bot
tom he could take it il his hand. He
shook it and yelled. but Jim was clear
| gone and didn't answer. The rain
was coming faster and faster, and
the lightning was roaring every half
minute The boy couldn't see but one
way out of it, ald he took the very
way that would have been considered
too dangerous by grown man. I'd
have been scary of it myself.
"He climbed the rope. just think
of it! He was right under the bucket
Of paint and Jim. Either might tum-
BILE on him any minute. Then the
lightning was liable to strike the
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

The night clerk of a leading hotel Of Wash
ington, D. c., says that last winter south
ern congressman came to him and demanded
that his room be changed. When asked
what displeased him, he replied, angrily:
"NVel, that German musician in the next
room and don't get along well. Last night
he footed away on his clar1onet so that l
thought | never would go to sleep. After |
had caught a few winks was awakened by
a pounding at my door. What's the mat.
ter? | asked If you please said the
German, dot you would schnore Of der same
key. You vas go from B fiat to G, and 1t
snoils der moosic'
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
Through Tourist Sleeping Car Service 70
Oh NJ Lcn and CallfornIa

Via Chicago Great Western R'y to kansas
CITY, and Missouri, Kansas q Texas S San
Antonio & Arkansas Pass and Southern "a
cific railways through Dallas, San Antonio
FL Paso and Los Angeles to San Francisco.
Only through car line from the NorthwesU
to Texas points and connecting at spoI-
ford Junction for all points in Old Mexico;
These cars are in charge of an experienced
official and leave st. Paul every Friday at
II 20 p. M, reaching Dallas the following
Sunday, San Antonio on Monday, Fl Paso
on Tuesday, Los Angeles at noon Wednes-
day and San Francisco early Thursday
morning. These are Pullman Tourist Cars,
similar to those run on all transcontinentai
lines and the charges for berths are about
half those regularly charged To persons
who have made the trip to California via
other routes, this Southern route will prove
a most delightful change, and to persons
contemplating a trip to Texas or Mexican
points. 1t furnishes facilities heretofore I'M
offered Full information furnished BY any
Chicago Great Western agent, or J. r
Elmer, G. A.P.D., cor 5th and Robert SITS,
St Paul Mimi.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
Inu remncrature for AnnIes.

The most important condition In
storing apples is the temperature. The
storage oom should be kept very near
freezing point. ranging preferably
from SO to IS degrees Fahrenheit.
Even a degree or two below freezing
viii ordinarily do no damage. Tenn
peratures which viii ruin potatoes
and other vegetables are entirely ia
yorable to apples; and, conversely,
temperatures which are suitable to
potatoes are too high for apples.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
DAMsEL WITH THE DuMPLINes

The damsel with the dumplings is the very
maid for me.
I love her as munich her mullins and her
toast and tea;
Delicious cooking makes her daily nearer
dearer far
Than all the gorgeC US butterflies that IN
rich parlors are;
The poet may sing ditties to the man VINO
holds the hoe,
Give me the prime attractions Of the
damsel with the dough.
Far sweeter are her features with that
-four besprinkied nose.
Her bare arms soft and shapely and her
common working clothes,
Her cheeks made red with exercise in
wholesome labor gained.
Her song by honest daily toll well sweet
ened and sustained,
Than all Belgravia's ldlers in their rustling
silks and pearls,
Than half a hundred tattlesome and tire
some giddy girls.
Her clear eyes twinkle brightly as she
bustles here and there,
The comfort of her loved ones all her first
and foremost care;
Her glossy curls much disarranged by
hustling In the home,
Completer, sweeter, neater than the
maiden moths who roam
Through fashions dizzy dances, prances,
prinkings, prigs and whirls.
Much better beyond measure is this queen
Of useful girls.
Nor is she lacking knowledge, though she
mixes # with sense.
She possesses stores of wisdom never
warped by false pretense;
From books she culls the very cream of all
substantial lore,
Has all-desired accomplishments and halt
a hundred more;
In short a combination of the angel and
the maid,
OF charms in fullest measure by true merit
underlaid.
A little household goddess gliding industry
with mirth,
Half heavenly in true happiness, half made
for things of earth;
A heart as true as compass to her love as
point and pole,
one noble man reflected in the mirror OF
her soul;
She is fun of useful graces. loyal, loving
as can be.
Yes, the darling with the dumplings Is the
merry maid for me.
l. EDGAR JONES.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
TAIL BOARD SEAT

shown in the cut. 4 small hole and
wire nail will keep the board from
Shipping at the other end. Five chair
or sofa springs nailed to the middle,
with short board nailed above them,
will make a very comfortable seat,
and one that viii not be in the way
when it is desired TO use the board as
"tailboard. IN. Y. Tribune.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
The Baby was Healthy.

Two Irishmen who had not seen each 9th.
er for long time met at fair. They had
a lot of things to tell each other. ''Shure,
It's married / am" said O'Bren. "Y ou
don't tell me sol" said Blake. Faith, yes"
said O'Brien, "an' I've got fine, healthy
picter of me-" Blake looked for moment
at O'Bren, who was not, to say the. least,
remarkable for his good looks, and then
said: "Och, well, what's the harrum so
long as the child's healthy" = Chicago
Chronicle
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
No place Like Home.

An Atchison man took sick Saturday and
decided TO stay home till he got rested. He
was back at work Monday. His wife had
asked him within few hours to take care
of the baby, to chop onions for pickles, to
grind the coffee, to dress the children, and
to milk the COW while he was resting. -
| Atchison Globe
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
Does Gomez agree with Yous

If not, drink Grain O-made from pure
grains A lady writes: "The first time I
made Grain-O did not like it, but after us
ing it one week nothing would induce me to
go back tocoffee " Itnourishes and feeds the
system. Children can drink it freely with
great benefit. 1t is the strengthening sub
stance of pure grains. Get a package to-day
from your grocer, follow directions in max
ing, and youwill havea delicious and healthful
table beveragefor old andy l5cand Csc.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
DeIIcious Desserts.

Burnham's Hasty Jellyeon makes the
finest dessert jellies, clear and sparkling
and deliciously Favored. Prepared in min
ute. 1t is only necessary TO dissolve in hot
water and set away to cool. Flavors: or
ange, lemon, strawberry, raspberry, peach,
wild cherry and unfavored "calfsfoot" for
making wine and coffee jellies. All grocers
sell it.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

Her Biscuits.-"These aren't the kind Of
biscuits my mother used 70 bake" he said
"Ob. George" she faltered on the verge Of
tears. ''Wen, they're mott" he repeated EN-.
phaticailv. "They're enough sight better.
Ard then the sun came out aga!n.-Phiia-
daIDhia Evening Bulletin
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
A New Fire-Extineuisher,

A scientist suggests that milk be used to
extinguish the flames of burning kerosene,
because milk forms an emulsion with the
oil, which makes it accomplish its object
more quickly" The best medicine to quickly
cure constipation, indigestion, dyspepsia,
stomach remedy, and has record of over
stomach remedy and has a record of over
fifty years of cures Try it also for malaria,
fever and ague and be convinced.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

Dolly vas out for walk and met an
old friend of her grandfather.
@And how cd are yoa. little one?''
asked the old gentleman.
But Dolly was indignant.
SIN hardly old al all; I'm nearly
new she answered. tossing her head
Cincinnati Enquirer.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15

"They say remarked the philosophic
man. that the darkest hour Is just before
the dawn" "Jimmlny!" exclaimed Lar
bones. that's one Of my brightest hours,
Tor I'm always sure to be asleep then. -
Pbilade,phia Press.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
Mhere He soId Thcm.

Mr.. Raisem Yes, we get good
prices for our cabbagss. but we have
to haul them SO far there is no money
in il.
Mr.. Quizzit But ] thought you
were within square of the market.
Mr.. Raisem The market? oh. yes.
But the tobacco factory is two miles
away baltimore American.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
Getting His Money. worth

Stranger (who has just visited a
museum. to the custodian HERES
two marks-you may give me back
one mark.
Custodian quitting the coin IN his
pocket Sorry. but l haven't any
change. Tell you what I'll do. though
IN snow you through the museum
again. -Fliegende Blaetter.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
p. of H.-National Grange, Washing
ton, ID. c.

The Big Four will sell tickets to Washing
ton at one and one-third fare for round trip
on account of meeting OF the National
Grange November l4th, 22nd. This is the
scenic and historic line to Washington via
Cincinnati and the Chesapeake and Ohio Ry.
For maps, rates, etc, address j. Z. Tucker,
G. n. A., 234 Clark St., Chicago.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1900-11-15
Best for the Bowels.

No matter what ails you, headache to
cancer, you will never get well until your
bowels are put right. Cascarets help nature,
cure you without a grippe or PAIN produce
easy natural movements, cost you Just 10
cents to start getting your health back
Cascarets Candy Cathartic, the genuine, put
up in metal boxes, every tablet has G.. G.. G.
stamped on it. Beware of limitations.