davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
A TobnecoIeas Tobacco Heart.

"You have" said physician, 1.-THE
tobacco heart" The patient made an
swer, Doctor, never smoked but
once, and that was when / was boy"
This happened in Germantown. Both
men laughed, and the physician pre-
pared to examine the patient again, SO
as to make another diagnosis.
After a half hour of hard work the
tobacco heart still seemed to resemble
the mans disease, and the physician
said, What do you do for a hving?"
The man replied. Il am a tobacconist."
sWell, then, of course, you've got the
tobacco heart, whether you're smok-
er or not. said the physician. ''All
day long you breathe in tobacco. The
dust of it fills your lungs, circulates
with your blood all over your body and
is digested with your food have had
a number of cases such as yours, and
prescribe eight hours day in the
fresh air. You'll find it hard to follow
this prescription. Away from the to-
bacco laden air of your shop you will
have the uneasy, restless longing to
get back to it which the smoker, after
few hours of abstinence. has for a
cigar. That is strange, but you'll find
it true. You have unconsciously ac-
quired the tobacco breathing habit,
and it's habit harder, l believe, to
break than the smoking habit ITSELF
Philadelphia Record.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
STRIKING A MATCH.
Showing How Little Things May .
Times Decide a Mans Fortune.

Showing How Little Things May at
Times Decide Mans Fortune.
The truth of the saying that little
things may oftentimes play an impor-
tant part to mems affairs when the
men least expect it was illustrated one
day recently.
"See that young man over there" re-
marked an insurance friend of his,
pointing to one of his clerks working
away industriously at desk in anoth-
er room. "Well, he got his place In my
Office through the striking of a match,
although he doesn't know it.
II was standing at the entrance Of
this building about month ago wait
ing for friend to come down the ele-
vator, when that young man approach
ed me with letter Of recommendation
and an application for employment. l
had made it known q few days before
that / needed another clerk, and he
had heard Of it. However, / had al
most made up my mind to take on a
young man who had been to see me
the day before and was about to tell
the last applicant so, when he pulled q
match from one of his pockets to light
cigar he had been smoking, but
which had gone out.
".Sorry, SIR he said, balancing him
self on one foot, while he lifted the
other so as to admit of his striking the
match on the heel of his shoe. Sorry.
for would like very much to work for
you, and l think l would have made
you good clerk
"The match striking incident made
me think SO too. Right at the young
mans elbow was great italian mar
BILE column upon which were the marks
showing where many matches had been
struck by yandals too utterly indiffer-
ent to the rights Of others to refrain
from indelibly stamping their vandal-
ism upon property to restore which
would have cost hundreds Of dollars.
1t would have been the most natural
thing in the world for many man to
have scratched that match on the mar
BILE column. and the fact that this
Young man chose to use the heel Of his
shoe instead showed that he was
thoughtful and conscientious, two very
excellent traits. l was so impressed
that / told him to come and see me,
and the result of the visit was his Sc
curing the position. And his month In
my Office has shown that / made no
mistake in sizing him up."-Philadel-
phia Inquirer.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
old nrnrvland suneratition..

Witch Killing.-If horses are so bad
ly bewitched that one dies, the follow
ing will deprive the witch of her pow
er: Take the dead horse out into a
field and burn the carcass beside a
tree. First cut a cross in the tree,
then drive nail in at the cross, Now
take your rife, which must be loaded
with a silver bullet, choose a position
SO that the fire is between you and the
tree, and shoot over the fire at the nail.
When you hit the nail. the witch will
lose her power, and you cannot miss
with the silver bullet.
To Sell Oneself to the Devil.-Go to
the crossroads at midnight alone and
play on the banjo. If you really want
to sell yourself, two black dogs will
appear and will dance as you play.
Then you promise something fearful.
Any one who thus sold himself was
said to be able to outplay and Guidance
any competitors.
A Method For Girl to Try Her For
tune.-Put an egg to the fire and sit an
hour. The wind will howl and the
dogs bark, and the man you are to
marry will come in and turn the egg
around. If the egg bursts, you win die
Tor possibly. my informant adds, you
will never marry).-Baltimore Sun.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
Calculating Machines.

Babbage's calculating machine, which
was adopted by England in 1921. was
capable of computing any table by the
aid of differences and of extracting the
roots of equations and printing its own
results, but its complexity prevented 1t
from coming into general use, and
when grants from the English govern
ment were discontinued it was put
aside.
The machine used In the census bu-
reau at Washington is one of the most
marvellous mechanical calculators ever
pontrived. BY the use of system Of
perforated cards it tabulates and re-
cords the returns with which the Of
flee has to deal with absolute GER
tainty and with speed which could
not otherwise be reached save by the
employment of a very large clerical
rfa ff
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
EXCHANGED ovERcoATs.



AT First by Accident and Then to
Rectffy the Error.
"Oueer things have happened to me
in Chicago said the rubber goods
man, ''but perhaps the quecrest OF all
was the way lost and found my over
coat last winter. 1t was all the fault
of the check boy. He gave me out
what / took to be my coat as was
ready to go to the depot. 1t fitted me
all right, and so did the gloves In the
pocket. 1t was not until boarded the
train that l found some letters which
proved that l had the wrong coat. l
had lower berth for Detroit. The up
per berth passenger came in after q
bit, and as he sat down he said
"'Well, thought would get out or
Chicago this time without anything
happening, but I'm disappointed.
Through some hocus pocus or other
I've lost my overcoat-that is, I've
made an exchange with some one
".Just my case / replied.
"sWhere did you stopY
"'At the Auditorium
80 did L.
'Well, he had my coat, and l had
his" continued the rubber goods man,
"and it took only minute to effect
the exchange. We were both bound
for Detroit, both Intended to put up at
the same hotel and both had business
with the same firm. 1t was queer
thing, taken all around, but, as said
at. the beginning, there is no place Like
Chicago for surprises. A year ago
was hurrying along State street with
the crowd when l ran plump into
man whom | had left for dead in Mex
leo three years before, and the first
words he spoke was to tell me he was
hard up and dun me for So | owed
Washington Post
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
A LuNATic's IMITATION.


1t Lacked Finish and Got Himself
and a Thief Into Trouble.
A Paris correspondent tells an inter-
esting story of how shop thief was
captured recently at the Bon Marche
In circumstances that in all probability
are unique. One of the private detect
ives in the pay of the establishment
noticed a man who. with the most
barefaced effrontery, was appropriate
ing articles of every description. The
individual indeed seemed to make lit
tie or no attempt to keep his operations
secret He simply walked from coun-
ter to counter and flied his pockets
with whatever attracted his fancy.
In spite of the strangeness Of the
mans proceedings there was nothing
to be done but to have him arrested,
and he was given into custody. His In
dignation was extreme. He protested
that 1t was most unjust that he should
be interfered with in this way when
other people who were behaving In ex-
actly the same manner were left I'M
molested, and he pointed TO stout
gentleman of most respectable appear
ance who he asserted had been lay
ing his hands on all sorts of goods
without resorting to the formality Of
paying for them
The policeman to whom he had been
given Ia charge had been accustomed
to listening to unconvincing explana-
tons and took his prisoner to the sta
ton A few minutes later the stout
gentleman, also in the care Of police
man, arrived at the same destination
The detective, whose curiosity had
been aroused, had watched the per-
sonage and had found it to be true that
he was perpetrating theft after theft
with the utmost dexterity.
After short investigation he was
recognized to be an expert and notori-
GUS shoplifter. whereas the prisoner
first arrested proved to be lunatic
but recently discharged from an asy-
lum, whose mania took the form of
initiating any person who might hap
pen to strike him. The professional
thief was beside himself with rage at
what he described as the bad luck Of
getting into trouble through the vaga-
ries of mailman.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
sE 4 GOOD BoYI oooDBM


How oft in my dreams 90 back 10 the day
When / stood at our old wooden gate
And started to school in full BATTLE array,
Well armed with primer and slate,
And as the latch tell thought myself tree
And gloried. fear, on the sly.
TIL heard a kind voice that Whispered to me:
''Be good boyi Gcodbyl'
s'Be good boys Goodbyp It seems
They have followed me all these yeaysI
They have given form to my youthful dreams
And scattered my foolish fears;
They have staid my feet on many brink,
Unseen by blinded eye,
For just in time would pause and thinks
s'Be good boyl Goodbyi'
Oh, brother of mine, in the battle Of life,
Just starting or nearing its close,
This motto aloft, in the midst Of the strife.
Win conquer wherever it eoesl
Mistakes you will make, for each Of Us erFA
But, brother, just honestly try
To accomplish your best In whatever occurs
''Be good boyl Goodbyi'
John L. Shroy in Saturday Evening Post.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
Hi.-U.-le.. HaIf Dime.

SIT isn't safe to start out without a
pocketful Of pennies any more" re-
marked a member of the house the
other day. "Yet I can remember that
when came down into this section of
the country in army blue in 1868 a 3
cent piece was very small potatoes.
We were camped awhile out there in
Virginia, and my headquarters were in
the big plantation home. A son Of the
house and myself became good friends,
although he was and nearly 35. One
day in lieu of the candy which | had
forgotten to bring him from the near
by town gave him silver half dime.
/ had forgotten all about the incident,
when some two weeks later he came
into my room and, opening his hand,
held out to me on his little pink palm
the silver piece had given him.
'Heah, Mr.. Captain, you can have it
back he said plaintively. 1t won't
buy muffin Washington Star.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27

"That man will not live to be old"
remarked scientific man to the writ
er, indicating a man who was standing
near.
'Why, prayY' the writer queried
wonderingly.
well he has not single physio-
logical index of long life. His head Is
narrow; he has narrow eyes and nos
trils and long. delicate hand. all of
which augur Ill for length Of days.
eff you observe carefully, you will
find that, with rare exceptions, which
only serve to emphasize the rule, men
who live to be old have wide heads
above the ears and wide foreheads.
Large and wide nostrils are always
evidence that those two important orr
gans, the lungs and the heart. are good.
The ears In old men are almost invari-
ably placed low. Again. long lived
people usually have broad and short
hands inelegant, it may be. but still
an indication of long life.
IF, therefore, you see man who an
swers these physical conditions, you
may safely. barring accidents, of
course, predict for him length of days"
New York Telegram.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
One ON Him.

"Well. bless my soul!' exclaimed one
of the first citizens of Chicago. that
breezy metropolis on the banks of Lake
Michigan. when did you hit the
town."
II have not hit it at ally' corrected
the man from Boston. 1.-The largeness
of the area and the absence of a def
mite personality preclude such action"
THAT'S So" assented the Chicagoan,
his cordial hilarity little less marked.
by the way, where are you stopping"
"I'm not stopping at all. my dear
friend
mot stopping at all? Why. what
the
'No, but I'm staying at the Palmer
House. Deuced expensive place, I'll
say"
THAT'S sol Well, It's too bad"
Too badi How's thatT
well, was going to invite you to
come on out and put up at my house
while you were in town, but since
you're staying at the Palmer House,
suppose it's no use.'
And off he walked.-Kansas City In.
dependent.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27

Eyes," said noted detective. II have
seen a great many queer things in my
experience"
Discovered good many gigantic
frauds, | supposeY ventured an ad-
mirer
well, | should say So was the re-
ply. "But, between you and me, the
most complete piece of deception I
ever saw was woman, young, pretty
and, would have sworn, an ANGEL
But she wasn't?'
II should say not. She has temper
like a whirlwind, and when she gets
wild the very earth seems to shake"
Good graciousl And how did you
manage to discover her true charac-
terg'
"Well, I-aheml The fact is, mar
ried herv'
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27

The first negro minstrel troupe ap-
peared in the United States about 1S45.
They were real negroes. led by man
named Johnson, and the melody which
gained them great applause was named
THAT Old Gray Goose" The words
ran, "Oh, don't you see that old gray
goose a-lookin at the gander?" This
was sung by the tenor voice, and the
chorus ran in parts to the words
sWhere," Here" 81 hear" and then a
ringing chorus. Another Of their part
songs was "Oh, Mamma. Must Be
Married to Mr.. Punchinello," different
voices singing "Who Mr.. Punch p
"Who Mr.. Nell?" Who Mr.. Lo?" "Who
Mr.. Punchinello|
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
There seems to be nothing to hinder
Grecians noses doing as the Romans do.


Now is your opportunity. There is no
time when the system is so much in need
of good medicine, like Hoods Sarsapar-
lila, and no time when it is so susceptible
to the benefits to be derived from such a
medicine By purifying, enriching and
vitalizing the blood and toning up the
system Hoods Sarsaparilla starts you
right for whole year of health.
Constipation is cured by Hoods Pills.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
A PARTIALLY oBEYED ORDER

The Reporter Returned, but the Mule
Was Total loss.
Harmon w. Brown of Ohio, who held
a responsible place on the STAFF Of Ggur
eral Rawlins during the civil war, tells
the following story Of the generals
treatment of an intrusive reporter:
Zone day before vicksburg the cor
respondent Of certain paper went to
General Rawlins for news. :,
.aThe general pondered moment and
took me one side.
"'Take this young man. he said, up
to the top of those trenches within
stones throw of the enemy Take him
up there and lose him. don't care
what happens. Understand
II said did, and we started through
the lines Both of US were mounted.
pointed out crest overlooking the en-
envy and told him he could get good
view from that point.
"tAin't you coming with meY he
asked.
mo / replied. I know all want
to know
90 uS SIdIt6Q QlOuC. AS SOOH do tAfC
top of his hat and the tips of his mules
ears showed above the crest there came
a volley of musketry ten yards wide
that cut the air like big knife blade.
The crown of his hat was sliced off as
with shears. He managed TO drop to
the ground in safety, but the persever-
ing mule was literally filed with lead.
After the firing ceased the correspond
ent crawled to the spot where was.
Ibid you learn what you wanted to
known asked.
"'EhY gasped the correspondent.
wiping his face and looking at his
hands to see whether they were bloody.
What wanted to know? Oh, yes, of
course The enemy are over that ridge
all right
when we returned to headquarters,
General Rawlins saw us and hailed
me. / went inside his tent.
"'I thought told you to lose that
confounded reporter somewhere he
said testify.
al did the best could, SIR l an
swered. He came back. but | have
the honor TO report the mule total
loss Saturday Evening Post
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
They Marry YOUNG.

The Boer youth weds extremely
young. His education is over and he is
considered man of business when he
is 16. Ills bride does not come to him
portionless. but usually with dowry
consisting Of cows. goats and sheep. a
span Of oxen and quiet riding horse.
To each child that is born well to do
Boer likes to assign certain farm stock
as a NEST egg" for future dowry or
as a start In life.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
linn wa. Ahead.

Its strange" sighed the trolley con-
ductor, how, when two boys start out
with equal chances, one of them Is
bound to forge ahead while the other
lags behind. There was Jim. Jim
and were fast friends as youths. but
look at me nowl Equal as our chances
were, Jim is ahead
"What is be doingT asked the pas
senger who had paid his fare.
"He's the motorman up front. Did
I get your nickelY Bang! Chatter!
edmund placer Bang! Clatterl
Ting-a-ling! Yes, sir; it's stranger
Detroit Free Press.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
The Grenade Throwers.

The greDadiers. the senior of British
regiments which compose the brigade
of guards. got its name from the fact
that toward the end of the eighteenth
century the men were armed with
hand grenades to throw among the
enemy. They had to be in the front
of the fighting line; hence they gained
a reputation for bravery and the name
of the .'grenadiers." The badge of the
regiment is still hand grenade spout
ing flames, though that deadly engine
Of war has long since been superseded.
Scottish
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
Even if wigs do not prolong life, they
keep many people from dyeing.

Putting food into diseased stomach is
like putting money into pocket with
holes The money is lost. All its value
goes for nothing. When the stomach is
diseased, with the allied organs of diges-
ton and nutrition, the food which is put
into it is largely lost. The nutriment is
not extracted from it. The body is weak
and the blood impoverished
The pocket can be mended. The stom-
ach can be cured. That sterling remedy
for the stomach and blood, DR.. Pierces
Golden Medical Discovery, acts with Pc
culian promptness and power or the organs
of digestion and nutrition 1t is positive
cure for almost all disorders of these
organs, and cures also such diseases of the
heart blood, liver and other organs, as
have their cause in a weak or diseased
condition of the stomach
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
A Question Of Grammar.

"Ain't you got any senseY asked the
4-year-old daughter Of the man who
doesn't believe in corporal punishment.
'Why, my dear" said the father re-
provingly, ''aren't you ashamed to talk
to papa that way"
Excuse me- papa" she answered. IL
meaned to say Isn't you got any nenseT'
--IndianaDolis News.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27

The grand specific for the prevailing
malady of the age, Dyspepsia Liver Com
plant, Rheumatism, Costiveness, General
Debility, etc, is Bacon's Celery King for
the Nerves. This great herbal tonic slim
ulates the digestive organs, regulates the
Liver and restores the system to vigorous
health and energies. Sample Free Large
packages SOC and S5c. Sold only by Wells
& Son, Columbus; E. D. Prickitt, Mount
Holly; W. G. Jones, New Egypt; Edw W.
Rossell, Pemberton, and HI. H. Leeds,
Rancocas
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27

HAHAMPEn Active, reliable men to solicit
tMN AN EN orders for nursery stock iper.
WW manent employment expenses and sal
u u AIRY to those who can leave home and de-
vote their entire time to the work or commits.
sion to local men. Stock strictly drst-class.
The business easily learned Write at once
for terms and territory. State age ana pre-
vtOus occupation.
THE Il. q. CHASE COMPANY,
South Pemu Square, Rhtiedsiphins "a.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27
Right and Left Eyed People.

People are right or left eyed just as
they are right or left handed. and just
as the right hand is usually the more
powerful. so Is the right eye. Only
one person in ten is left sighted. Ii Is
very probable that the use Of weapons
during countless ages has had some
thing to do With the extra power of
the right eye.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27

Rev. John Reid, Jr., of Great Falls,
Mont, recommended Ely's Cream Balm
to me. | can emphasize his statement;
ut is positive cure for catarrh if used as
directed. Rev. Francis W. Poole, Pas
tor Central Pres. Church, Helena, Mont.
After using Ely's Cream Balm six week
l believe myself cured of catarrh, Joseph
Stewart, Grand Ave, Buffalo, N. Y.
The Balm does not irritate or cause
sneezing. Sold by druggists at 90 cts. or
mailed by Ely Brothers, So Warren St.
New York.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27

81 know what you want. Mr. Spoon
amore," said Johnny. you want to
kiss Mabel"
On which account the sorely tried
young woman dared not send the inn
pudent youngster out Of the room.
Chicago Tribune.
The Mount Holly news. [volume] (Mount Holly, Burlington Co., N.J.) 1891-1942, 1900-03-27

The Abyssinians make tea from
the leaves of certain plant which has
such stimulating qualities that to chew
a single leaf will produce all the eff
fects Of strong cup of tea.