Omaha daily bee., 1900-01-07

Photo by courtesy Review of Reviews.
for a minute, studying her antagonist, then
she slowly relaxed her hold on the box.
well, you can have it," she said, ami
ably. you look as if you need the soap
The bargain counter is the place to OBJ
serve how they love one another.
A Memphis paper tells of a married
couple who are in the habit occasionally of
going cut at night to entertainments and
social affairs, and at such times they make
themselves solid with their little boy by
saying that they are going out to see a
sick man. One week these social affairs
came pretty frequently. On Monday night
they went to the theater, and t Id the lad
that they had to sit up with the sick man.
Tuesday night they went out to visit a
neighbor, and explained that they were
going to give some medicine to the man
that was sick. On Wednesday night they
proposed to attend an entertainment, and
apologized to the young chap by saying that
they had to put a plaster on the sick mans
back to draw out the pain. Papa" asked
the youth, is the sick man in much pain?'
Very much, my son." And is he pretty
near dead?' Yes, he's in bad shape" The
lad thought deeply for a while, and then
remarked: We'll, papa, he can't die any
too soon to suit me-"
Congressman Gordon OF Ohio, better
known as Bob" Gordon, is handsome and
rich and a bachelor, reports the Washing
ton Post. He is a perfect Adonis of the
blonde type. When quite a young man
he is still young, for that matter-Gordon
used to work in his fathers flour mill and
the dust affected his lungs. "Consump-
tion," said the doctor, and Gordon believed
him. Still, even a sick man will try to
make the best OF a bad situation and Cor
don started east for the purpose of having
a good time as long as he might live. He
spent a week In New York. all the time
feeling the shadow of death was over him
and envying healthy men with an honest
envy, Then he went to Atlantic City and
watched the whirling eddies of life, quite
sad, OF course, because he was doomed TO
depart from this world so soon.
AS the days went by Gordon noticed that
he did not seem to be growing any worse
and one day he weighed himself. He had
gained twelve pounds.
Heaven above!" said Gordon. "A man
who is dying doesn't gain twelve pounds in
twelve days. | guess that doctor didn't know
his business"
And with n wild whoop of delight Gordon
rushed to the telegraph office. wired for
some moro money and started on a years
holiday. When he went back to Ohio he was
as rat as a 2-year-old colt and he has never
had a sick day from that time to this. He
is the healthiest- looking man in the house.
.
\ good story is told in Leslie's Weekly
o. an experience OF Joseph Jefferson, the
great actor. A number OF years ago he
played n one-night engagement In a small
indiana town, appearing In his favorite
part or KIP Van Wrinkle In the hotel at
when he stopped was an freshman ire
Gently landed" who acted ms porter and
general assistant. Judged by the deep and
serious interest which he took In tho house
he might have been clerk, lessee and pro-
prietor rolled into one. Al about 4 o'clock
In the morning Mr., jefferson was startled
by a violent humping ON HIS door. When
he struggled into consciousness and realized
mat he had left no "call' order at the of
nee he was naturally very Indignant. But
MS sleep was spoiled for that morning.
so No arose aud soon after appeared before
the clerk. See hor," no demanded of
that individual, why wna called nj this
unearthly hour2" II don't know, air nn-
swered the clerk; I'm ask Mike" The
freshman Was summoned Said the clerk.
Mike there waa no cali for Nj Icnnrnnn.
why ala you diHturb hlm2" Taking the
clerk by tho lapel OF the coat the iIihernlan
leu MN To ono slide and said Ia u myntcrinua
"n'sper' lilo were SNORING lolko u h0rnc.
sor, and ord heerd tho h'ya say as how no
were onct afther shaping fr lwinty yaars.
so OF SEES to mesilf. Hre 81. 'Molhe. Us a
coming onto him agin and MS yar luty 10
GIT the crayther out o yea house Ia.
stantly!"