Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1900-01-12
Mr.. Jones or Mr.. Brown


35 or thereabout, one of those men who
seem to be born to pass through the
world alone. 1t CHANGED that MIR. Brown
had occasion to visit town some 5O
miles distant. Walking leisurely along
the street, he was all at once accosted by
a child of 8, who ran up to him, exclaim-
ing:
FEATHER, want you to buy me some
more sugar candyW
"Whom were you speaking to, my
dear?" he inquired of the little girl.
81 spoke to you, father" said the little
one, surprised.
"Really." thought Mr.. Brown, "this is
embarrassing. ! am not your father, my
dear" he said. "What is your nameY
"What a funny father you are!" she
said. But you are going to buy me
some candy"
Eyes, yes; I'll buy you a pound II you
won't call me father any MORE" said
Brown nervously.
Mr.. Brown proceeded to confection-
er's and actually bought a pound of sugar
candy, which he placed in the hands Of
the little girl. In coming out of the store
they encountered the girls mother.
"Oh, mother" said the little girl, ''just
see how much candy father has bought
for mel!
"You shouldn't have bought her so
much at a time, Mr.. Jones'" said the
lady. I'm afraid she will make herself
sick. But how did you happen to get
home so quick? l did not expect you till
night"
"Jones-I-madam," said the embar-
raised Mr.. Brown. Its all a mistake.
amt Jones at all. 1t isn't my name.
am Eliphalet Brown OF W, and this
Is the first time | ever came into this
city"
Good heavensl Mr.. Jones', what has
put this silly tale into your head? You
have resolved to change your name, have
you? Perhaps it's your intention to
change your wifeY
Mrs Jones tone was now defiant, and
this tended to increase Mr.. Browns en-
barrassment.
81 haven't any wife, madam. I never
had any"
"And do you intend to palm this tale
off upon meI' said Mrs. Jones with ex-
element. IF you are not married, I'd
like to know who amp
II have no doubt you are a most re-
spectacle lady" said Mr.. Brown. and |
conjecture from what you have said that
your name is Jones, but mine is Brown,
madam, ana always was.
Melinda" said her mother, suddenly
taking her child by the arm and leading
her up to Mr.. Brown, Melinda. who is
this gentleman
"Why. that's fatherw was the child's
immediate reply as she confidently placed
her hand in his.
"You hear that, Mr. Jones. do you ?
You hear what the innocent child says.
ha NIL Incl Inc i'm,
dence TO deny that you are my husband.
The voice OF nature. speaking through
the child, should overwhelm you. I'd
like TO know il you are not her father
why you are buying sugar candy for her
l should like to have you answer that.
But | presume you never saw her before
in your lifeT''
Il never did. On my honor l never
did. told her | would give her the sugar
candy il she wouldn't call me father any
more
You did. did you? Bribed your child
not 10 call you father. On. Mr.. Jones.
this is Infamous. Do you intend to de
sert me, sir, and leave me TO the cold
charities Of the world? And is this your
first stcpf'
Mrs. Jones was so overcome that with
out any warning she fell back upon the
sidewalk in a fainting tit.
Instantly a number OF persons ran to
her assistance.
81 don't know her." said Mr.. Brown.
'She isn't my wife. 1 don't know any
thing about herr
why, it's Mrs. Jones. amt it?"
"Yes, but I'm not Mr.. Jones'"
"Sir," said the first speaker sternly.
''this is no time TO jest. | trust that
you are not the cause OF the excitement
which must have occasioned your wife 5
fainting mt. You had better call a coach
and carry her home directly"
Brown saw that there was no use to
protract the discussion by denial. He
therefore. without contesting the point.
ordered n hackney coach to the spot.
Mr.. Brown accordingly lent an arm to
Mrs. Jones, who had somewhat recov-
cred, and was about to close the door
upon her.
Why. are you not going yourselfT"
mo! Why should II"
"Your wife should not go alone. She
has hardly recovered"
Brown gave a despairing glance at the
crowd around him and, deeming it use
less to make opposition where so many
seemed thoroughly convinced that he
was Mr.. Jones. followed the lady in.
where shall | driver"
"I-l-don't know" said Brown.
"Where would you wish to be carriedY"
Home, OF course" murmured Mrs.
Jones'
81 don't know
mo. 10 H street." said the gentle
man already introduced. glancing con
temptuously at Brown.
"Will you help me out, Mr.. Jones %
said the lady Il am not fully recovered
from the fainting fit into which you
cruelty drove me-"
Are you sure that l am Mr. Jones p
asked Brown. with anxiety.
"Of course"'
Then said he resignedly, II suppose
l am. But, if you believe me, | was
firmly convinced this morning that my
name was Brown, and. to tell you the
truth, haven't any recollection of this
house."
Brown helped Mrs. Jones into the par
Tor; but, good heavens! Conceive the as.
constituent Of all when a man was dis
covered seated in an armchair who was
the very facsimile of Mr.. Brown in
form, feature and every other respect!
Gracious" exclaimed the lady.
(which is my husbandT
An explanation was given, the mystery
cleared up and Mr.. Browns pardon
sought for the embarrassing mistake.
Mr. Brown has not since visited tba