davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-09-07
The Bravery of Il Woman.

Was grandly shown by Mrs. John
Bowling of Butler, Pa, in a three years
struggle with a malignant stomach
trouble that caused distressing attacks
of nausea and Indigestion. All RENE
dies failed to relieve heruntil she tried
Electric Bitters. After taking it two
months, she wrote: II am now wholly
cured and can eat anything. 1t is
truely a grand tonic for the whole
system las l gained in weight and feel
much stronger since using it," 1t aids
digestion, cures dyspepsia, improves
appetite, gives new life. Only SOC.
Guaranteed, at Emil Hargens drug
store.
Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-09-07

YOU MUST have pure blood for
y good health. Hoods Sarsaparilla
puriiics the blood. Take Hoods Sar-
saparilla if you would ssE WELL
Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-09-07
HOT SPRINGS.

Of this charming all-the.year.rouni
resort Rand-McNally's Official Rail
road Guide has the following notice
throughout the year.:
Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-09-07

Hot Springs ilncampment No. 80, l. o. o.. r
Meet at |. O. o. Il. Hall ON the LIST and Bro
Saturday evening of each month. Visiting
Patriarchs cordially invited to meet with us
Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-09-07

10. %. Hot Springs Lodge No. 112 meets
every Wednesday evening at ]. O.O. +. Hall.
Visiting brethren cordially invited to meet
with us.
Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-09-07

LARGER q rLIsH. so4-sto Main S.. Dubuque. Ia.
Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-09-07

AT. & A. M.-Harmony- Lodge meets Mt
Masonic Hall on the second Friday of each
mouth. Visiting brothers cordially invited.
Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-09-07

A. o. P.-Ancient Order Pyramids meets
in !. O.lO. +. Hall on the first and third Fri
day evenings of encl, month. Visiting Pyra-
mids cordially invited to meet with us.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27

according to the Book of Common
Prayer: Of the Episcopal church. The
bpard Of bishops Of the Church of
England has just issued special "of-
fetal prayer for the use Of their SOL
diersiin South Africa. The phraseol-
ogy; is interesting when read reflect
lively. 1t is as follows: .'.''"s = 49,
almighty Father, I have often
sinned against Thee. Oh, wash me
in the precious blood of the Lamb.
o God, fill me with Thy Holy Spirit,
that may lead a new life. Spare me
to see again those I love at home,
OF fit me for Thy presence in peace.
Strengthen us to quit ourselves. like
men in our right and great cause.
Keep us faithful unto death, calm in
danger, patient in suffering, merciful
AZ well as brave. true to our queen.
our country and our colors. IF it be
Thy will, enable US to win victory for
Britain; but, above ali, grant us the
better victory over temptation and
sin, over life and death, that we may
be more than conquerors through. Him
who loved us, and laid down His life
Tor us, Jesus, our Saviour, the Cap
tain Ut the army Of God. Amen,n
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
JACK ENTERTAINS VISITORS
Young Genius Tells an Old Family
:; Friend That She Looks
"Like 30 Ccnts.''

Jack is the genius of the family. he
is ten years old, an omnivorous reader,
and always on the hunt for informa-
tion. Occasionally he breaks out with
questions when visitors are around,
and causes CONSERVATION in domestic
ranks, although to Jack it seems that
he always puts things with a fine air of
impartiality. Recently a neighbor
dropped in to spend the evening. Jacks
mother said that she would "be down
in a minute" and meantime Jack took
it upon himself to entertain the COM
pany.
''There is one thing that I would like
to know" said the quaint little fellow.
''Well?". smiled the visiting lady.
"Were you considered handsome
when you were q young woman?"
"Er-well, Jackie, J" hesitated the Wis
itor, II don't know: that. T was. Think.
probably that no one but Mr.. Brown
considered me beautiful, and you know
he married me-
. ''Well, I just wanted to know. Were
you skinny then?"
Not very.''
II don't think you could have been
80 very fat. Now you're old and ugly
and look like 30 cents. There's mamma
II hate to say it, because like her
first-rate, but she's not pretty, and
looks about what she is-5O,, er some
such. Then Mrs. Smith-she makes
good cream pie, but she surely never
could have been handsome. Well, this
is the way it goes with alllthe women
I. know. asked mamma what she
thought about it. She said that little
boys were to be seen and not heard,
and that she would have to give me
spanking before the day was over. So I
thought I'd ask YOU Chicago Inter
Ocean. y
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
a sTIcK1T MINISTER.
One Who Has Stuck Fast ON the Way
:%S to the Full Rank OF
. - Presbyte<. -, ~

A "sticlit minister" is one who,
having passed the university training
and successfully survived the ''trials," !"
as they are termed, of thesecclesiastic-
al courts, has reached the position 81
"licentiate"or probationer," which,
as in the case Of deacon in the Angli-
can Communion, conveys authority to
preach but not to dispense the Sacra>
ments, and makes him: eligible for ap-
Pointment to q parish. Until he has
reached the status of an ordained
Presbyter, says Good Words, he is not
q minister in the full sense of the term;z
and if he has grown old in the ranks OF
the probationers, or taken up another
calling such as that of schoolmaster,
he gradually sinks into the limbo Of
the "stickit ministers, - being men who
have stuck fast on the way to the full
rank OF Presbyter.
There are not many "stickit minis
ters" now in the strict sense of the
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27

THE BOY.

When you hear q fearful racket.
Like miniature cyclone,
with some sounds so strange that surely
Their like was never known;
While the mother listens calmly,
Even with smiling face,
I0u may know that it Is nothing
But the boy about the place.
When there's famine in the cupboard,
And the milk pail soon runs dry,
ana you can't keep pies or cookies,
No matter how you try:
And You vainly seek for apples
That have gone and left no trace,
Hard times Is not the trouble
There's a boy about the place.
When there's sawdust on the carpet,
And some shavings on the beds,
When the rugs are tossed in corners,
And your chairs stand on their heads:
While, II tool you're needing, you
All round the house must race,
You may know he's making something
IL the boy about the place.
When the house is full of sunshine
On the darkest kind Of day,
And you have to laugh at seeing
Some outlandish. boyish play:
And when eyes so bright and loving
OFT are raised to meet your face,
1ou Will pray, I know: "God bless him.
Bless our boy about the place."
,-Pac1hc Coast Endeavorer.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
PERSONAL AND IMPERsoNAI.

The lord mayor Of London wears Z
badge of Office which contains dia-
monds valued at &120,000.
There are IL men in Chicester, Ene.
land, workhouses whose united ages
make l,o4e years an average of.near>'
II 81 years each. B.
Ex-Congressmen Jerry simpson,
who has taken again to farming and
stock-raising, sold ESQ head Of cattle
the other day. ''That," he remarked,
as he pocketed the cash, "that outdoes
life in Washington, I think, don't
your 4. :.,s IT, .dt>g :
In his youthful days President
Loubet, the French executive, fought
three sduels, being victorious in two.
In the third his opponents sword
pierced ~Loubet's hand, which, for 10
years has always ached on the near
approach of rain. .;., IT,
James Parson, of Devonshire, Eng-
land, was known as ''The Singing Ma
chine" because he had memorized and
could sing about 1000 songs. One
evening he made and won a bet that
he could go on singing until daylight
without repeating any song:
Six vice presidents Of the United
States have. died; while in Office.
George Clinton died April 20, 1912;
Elbridge Gerry, November %, 1914;
William Rufus King, April 1s, 1853;
Henry Wilson, November %, 1875
Thomas A. Hendricks, November 25.
1885, and Garret A. Hobart, Novem-
Der 81, 1899.
No relationship exists between two
families named Clark who live re.
spectively in Augusta, Ga., and
Lynchburg, Va. In each family is
Walter Clark, whose father was
named Samuel, and whose mothers
maiden name was Walker. Each of
the two Walter Clarks has brothers
named William and Samuel, uncles
named Charles and John, and an aunt
named Elizabeth.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
PSYCHOLOGY OF FISHES.
An Interesting Experiment Prove,
That the Creatures Can Learn
By Experience.

Numerous facts witness in a vague
way to the ability of fishes to profit
by experience and fit their behavior to
situations unprovided for by their in
nate nervous equipment. All the phe-
nomena shown by fishes as the re-
suit OF tanning are, of course, of this
sort, but such facts have not been ex-
act enough to make clear mental or
nervous processes involved in such be-
havior or simple enough to be avail
able as demonstrations of such
processes.
The common fundulus was chosen
and the fish. was kept in an antigua
rum. The space at one end was shad-
ed from the sun by cover, and AL
food was dropped in at this end.
Along each side of the aquarium were
fastened pairs of cleats, allowing tho,
experimenter to put across it parti.
tions of wood, glass or wire screening.
These partitions were made each with
an opening at some part, and then
the experiments were begun When
the fish was caused to leave a shady
corner and swim up the sunny end BY
putting the slide without any opening
in behind him, and moving it gently
up toward the forward end, the cp-;
portunity was given for observing the
animals behavior to good purpose.
This fish dislikes the sunlight; and
tried to go back to the shaded portion.
He swan against the screen, humping
against it here and there along the
bottom; occasionally he stopped and
remained still for awhile. Sometimes
he would rise up toward the top of
the water, especially while swimming
up and down the length of the screen.
The screen used in the first expert
ment was cut away slightly at the
upper corner so as to leave an OPEN
ing, so that the slide somewhat re-
sembled a letter with postage stamp
on it, the postage stamp representing
the aperture. After the fish had been
experimental upon six or eight times
a day, it was found it swan against
the screen less and less. He swan up
and down it fewer and fewer times
until finally his only act was to go to
the right hand side, rise up and swim
out. The fish had clearly profited by
his experience and modified his con-
duct to suit his situation, for which
his innate nervous equipment did not
definitely provide. He had, in COM
mon language, learned to get out
American Naturalist.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27

shlokas, our hexameters, our Alexan-
drines, and so forth, each lungful of
verse; in the primeval tongue it was
likewise, but the sentences were vowels
only.
There are about ten or dozen pure
vowels to 60 upon, and vowel words
may run up to five sylla bles, so ehave
very considerable fund to draw on for
vowel streams. And these streams of
vowel speech corresponded to and ex-
pressed streams of emotion or feeling
rather than descriptions of concrete
objects. For we hardly realize how
terribly overladen with material trifles
our life IL to-day, and therefore what
great demands we make on Language
for concrete words. But our exclama-
tions, each of which indicates single
emotion, tend to remain pure vowel
sounds even at the present day.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
THE ORIGINAL SPECIE
r posed Entirely of vowels ne.
= peated or Varied.

The original speech, the true prime
val tongue of man was quite unlike any
langaage we have ever heard; yet we
haye Ill talked it, and its .sele-
merits are. e.present in the tongues Of to-
day. The primeval language, says the
Contemporary Review, was a vowel
Language altogether; It had no con
sonants. or contacts (as we ought to
call them) at all. It's words consisted
of vowel sounds following each other,
repeated or @varied-or words like
acaea, aoao, ala, auau, saeoia, iapa,
oioi, ouou, uaua, sueue,; all Of which
may say in spassipgaare taken from a
language in use to-day. The sentences
were intermittent streams of vowels,
each stream held on so long 90 the
speakers breath allowed or whim die
tated. When all literature was recited.
the same consideration, the capacity
Of the lungs, DIFFERENTIATED the length
Of the bardic line, so we. have our
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27

household. If you've got any kick com
ing about me, all you've got to do is to
resolve yourself into a committee of
one, draw up your bill of complaint
and hand it to me- II the indictment
is worth consideration it'll be properly
considered. But do Northumberland
me distinctly, Mrs. Jobson-I do not,
not, not, purpose that my home and
fireside shall be invaded by lot of
women who think the world is aSin
them and who, consequently, take it
to be their mission in life to embitter
the minds of happy, contented mar
ried women against their husbands ard
protectors. I s'pose that one that was
here told you, Mrs. Jobson. that he
cause I'm beginning to get a roll of
fat on the back of my neck I'm incapa-
BILE of understanding the meaning of
the higher and nobler, the good, the
true and the beautiful, the influence
of environment, and the-er--tum-ta-
ra of the ta-ra-te-tu1n, hey? Is'pose
she told you that was gross and carnal
and british because require some
when I come home from work in the
evening, hey? s'pose she; tried to
throw it into you that am incapable
of understanding the spiritual, the
ososissipliical workings of your soul
because ], don't move out to Wyoming
and throw myself on the firing line
in support of the suffrage issue, and ~
At this point Mr.. Jobson picked up
the coal tongs and raped them four
times against the CRATE. ("
II don't like to see you get in so far
that you can't get out again, Mr.. Job
son." she said, smilingly. Mrs.
Schenectady came here as one of the
'remonstrants,' which is the new name
for the Woman's Anti-Suffrage asso-
ciation!"
Mr.. Jobson swallowed gulp, but he
was game.
"say, can't you have her up for lunch
to-morrow?' he inquired.-Washing
ton Star.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27

term. Nearly every incentiate fills
some office as assistant in a parish. A
very few may remain for a time, or
perhaps permanently, in the pathetic
position of being dependent on casual
employment as preachers when Sun
day service is required, receiving fee,
usually guinea, for their trouble.
Their lot is far from envia BILE, especial
ly when under the faded black coat
there is found: man of culture, but
lacking the popular gift or the "push"
and influence which may have carried
his college chums, whom he may have
beaten in class work, into comfortable
charges.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27

his heels and pushed him through a
partition into another stall, where, an.
other zebra bit his hand, which had to
be amputated. Could he recover from
the zebra's owner? A jury thoughtrhe
could, but the court Of appeal says not.
A zebra is atpresent legally a wild ami
NAL, and. likely to remain so, since the
advance of the motor car makes
against tanning new animals for har-
ness. Now . mans duty with regard
to his wild beast is to, keep it t.secured,
SO that it may not go about seeking
whom it may devour, and secured his
zebra was. = True, the door was casual
IL left open, and if the visitor had mere
II gone in and been kicked, he might
have recovered; $ but he invited" his
kicking by stroking. Zebras do. not
understand magnanimity. All the
same, if zebras' doors are left open, it
might be well to put up notices that thu
beasts are likely to go OF at botn
ends. rs >1
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27

line OF my conclusions with respect to
the position. of woman in the United
States to-day. Mrs. Jobson, woman is
Ito employ slang phrase-tn the
United States to-day. The woman of
the United States to-day has more
privileges and fewer responsibilities
than woman ever had anywhere since
the world began. We break. our necks
to give her all that is coming to her, and
more. We slave for her and we flRnt
and die for her. She is at once the in
centivc of our best efforts and the re-
cipient> Of all the results thereof. We
love, admire and honor her. We are
accused by foreign peoples of setting
her up on q pedestal and worshiping
her idolatrously. Be that as it may,
woman isn't getting left in the game
OF civilization and progress. I'm glad
OF it. I'm tickled foolish when / re-
fleet upon the exalted position woman
occupies in the United States to-day"
"Hear, heart" exclaimed Mrs. Job
son, enthusiastically. THAT'S just
what think"
r "Be kind enough to reserve your
satire until I've concluded, madam"
said Mr.. Jobson, severely. But, Mr..
Jobson"-and here Mr.. Jobson. used
the book for baton wherewith to en-
phasize his remarks-"I'm agin female
suffrage. I may be out of date. 1t may
be that I ought to have lived in the
era of the shepherd kings of Egypt,
Mrs. Jobson. But, anyhow. and for all
that, I stand pat on that declaration
I'm agin female suffrage. They can
suffrage all they want to. They can
tackle every legislature from the pine
clad hills of Maine to the golden sands
of the Pacific-''
"Hear, heart" interpolated Mrs. Job
son.
but don't want any suffrage graft
ed on my own vine and fig tree. And,
what is more to the point, madame -
here Mr.. Jobson rose up on his toes
and looked real savage-"I don't intend
that there shall be any such grating.
I don't intend that any female suffra-
gists shall come a-loping up here to
my house for the purpose of attempt
ing to poison the mind of my wife
against"
But you are completely and entire
attempting to poison the mind of my
wife against ME and the methods
employ for the operation, of my own
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
The Welsh Double I.

A teacher who lately died in Wales
distinguished himself by helping a
bishop to make good a boast that he
would be able! to preach sermon in
Welsh within three months of his con-
secration. The pronunciation of the
up was serious hindrance, and the
teacher gave counsel which proved ef-
fective: "Place the top of your right
reverend tongue upon the roof of your
episcopal mouth, and hiss like . goose. ~
The bishop made such progress that
the sermon was delivered within the
promised period in what was described
as excellent Welsh.-Youth's Compan:
ion.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
They Drea1

They Dream No More.
He loved her for her pretty face,
Her figure neat and trim;
He had handsome countenance,
And, therefore, she loved him.
Yet they are weary, and the world
Seems bleak and full of woe;
But ten years married, and their sixth
Was born month ago.
Chicago Times-Herald.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
Nothing Grew There.

A Scotch mother was assisting her
little boy with his geography lesson,
when they came to the word desert"
which he could not understand. She
explained that it was a barren place =
a place where nothing would grow. The
boys face frightened up at the words,
and,- feeling sure that he had solved
the, difficulty, she asked him to ex-
plain the meaning, and the prompt an
swer came: my feyther's bald 'head!',
-Tit-Bits >i3 '. 80 Il
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27

40 Il Sonetines Happens.

II don't care what my constituents
Think" exclaimed the congressman.
hotly. II think for myself
Il once knew another man who
boasted Of that" suggested the man
from home. szs -.
"Yes?'' =. 81
"Oh, yes. And do you know what
happened to him p
7':No. What2''
'"Well,5 after the next election there
was no one else for whom he had the
privilege of thinking.'-Chicago Post.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
GettinE at the Facts.

"As the court understands it, said
the Judge, "the defendant here be-
gan the quarrel because the plaintiff
hurled an epithet at him. Was that
the way of it?''
mo, yer amer" the witness ex-
planned; "they're both liars. Oh seen
it all meself. Nobody thrun an epi-
thet. Moike-that's him over there
called Jawn something, and Jawn-
that's him over here-heaved brick.
Nobody hurled nothin' lse."-Chicago
Times Herald.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
SHE KNEW How 10 WRITE
Asked tho Eaiter for His Opinisn
and Then Was Not ,'ss 4.
SatisAed. A5 III rs

AAc average ulOT&e1peT1euCe8 !
thrill Of keen delight whenshe meets
one Of those modest, unasliimipI peis
soma who: simply write / Nttla!e'Ah EN-:
selves. The delight is intens:fA6 &
these Eliots and Thackerays in EN-.
bryo impsrt this information IN low
voiced confidence, with the further in
formation that they wouldn't have
it known for all the world" In most
cases the editor feels quite. safe in
promising them that the general pub
lie will never know anything about it.
He wishes that he might be as ignofant
of this knowledge as the general pub
lie. - ~" .
My friend Blank is such an editor.
He is one Of the blunt straightfor-
ward sort of men, much given to tell
ing the truth, and abhorring anything
that savors of beating around the
bush" He is terror to those persons
who "write a Httle," and who beg
him to tell them "the exact truth"
about their productions.
I sat behind a screen in his office
the other day, when there came timid
little knock on the door, and Blank
roared out: "Come in!" In a voice
that cracked the plastering. A tinid,
girlish little thing of "A OF IS years
f1uttered in.
"Yes'm!"
eyes? I'm so glad to know you, Mr..
Blank. have long been a subscriber
to your paper, and really don't know
how could get along without it,. And
I think your pieces are just splendid.
How envy you your writer's! And T.
! know it's dreadful bold in me to try,
even; but, then I write little myself,
sometimes"
"Do, eh?'
"Oh, yes; just a very, very little hit.
It is all so crude and poor that hardly
dare show it to anybody. Really, it is
too foolish in me to try, even; but
somehow I just can't help it. It Just
seems to me that Imust write. I'd give
worlds if I could write as you do
Would you be willing to tell me exact.
ly what you think of some of my ]>oor
little scribblings-my brain children,
as love to call them?''
Got 'em with your
eyes; just one or two foolish little
fancies that I dashed off in an idle
hour. know just how crude and poor
they are"
"Let me see them"
you'll tell me exactly what you
think?'
"Exactly!"
Thanks; it is best that know the
TRUTH"
Blank reads the "foolish little fan
cies," peep out, and see triumphant
smile on the authors face. Blank
hands back the verses.
care not they too dreadfully, NV.
fully bad?'
'They're pretty bad"
"Sir!"
1T is the exact truth"
"Sir!"
"There is no poetry in them"
"Sir, you shall answer for this!"
"You begged me to tell the truth:
II did not beg you to vent your petty
jealousy and spleen over verses OF
which, you are manifestly jealous. /
pity you! 7 supposed; sir. that, you
were incapable of such envy and NAL.
ice, and that you were always ready
to do honor to real talent. But see
1 am mistaken. Remember, sir, that
the verses are not offered for sale. In.
deed, they are not for sale to such a
paper as this. 1 bid you adieu, sir!"
"The woods are full of 'em," says
Blank, sententiously, as the door
bangs behind the woman who "wrote
q little."-Punch.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
With the savaxe Bachelor.

81 hear there is some talk of en-
ploying women as census enumera-
tors," said the Sweet Young Thing, in
her smoothest tones.
"Good idea," said the Savage Bache-
lor, to her great astonishment.
''Do you really think 500"
"Yes, I do. If there is anything on
earth woman is fit for, it is the busi-
ness of finding: out about other peoples
affairs. Didn't think I would agree
with you, did you?" - Indianapolis
Press
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
CriticlOm.

"This won't dol" said his friend.
ga short. stout man from Ken
tucky!'"
"What's the matter with that?"
asked the author.
"Why, Kentuckians, in literature,
must be tall and gaunt.'-Puck.
The Worthington advance., 1900-04-27
THERE ARE EXCEPTIONS.

"But, my dear husband, it really is
very unjust of you to abuse mothers
in-law so; there are good ones"
:"Well-well, never mind; I haven't
said anything against yours-it's only
mine I'm grumbling about" - The
Cigarette.