The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-04-01
Mr.. TIN DOOLAN OF CACHE
REVIEWS The CAMPAIGN

Well" said DOOlan, as he sauntered
in, th' games about done, amt it
An it luks loike dead aisy winnin' fr
tn Dimmacrats on King high, but be tn
Same token, kape ye'er eye on Jaames,
er he'll be turrnin' up tn day befure ilic-
ton wild foive aces that's come firm John
Henry's hand. an walkin' off wild tn
pot. undher tn roOles iv an ould game,
wild a new name, fr tn Republicans "
Utah bate tn divil fr gittin' out " tight
places. Amy OUld ting goes wild them,
firm dum-dUm ballots an cOpperhid vO-
ters to mimi tn road wild ecclesiastical
bombahst. when they're hard prissed f'r
votes.
That's always tn way wild a Utah
Dimmacrat. anyhow He sets down wild
tn Republican to play a quite game "
pollytics, an he says. This is TO be on tn
square, amt ito he says. 'Yis,' says tn
Republican, it is L be on tn same plan
that We runs our campaigns he says,
'whin we always squares tn situwashun
be what it shu'd bring in gold an sinds
tn bill to Mark he says. That's am
bigyOus.' says tn Dimmacrat, but
guess We name all right he says.
so they begins playin' an tn Dimma-
Gratis gathers in tn votes like farmer
gatherin' hay. whin all at wanst tn Ray
publican begins his sharp wurruk He
gives tn DimmaCrat a cigar, an while
he's smokin' it an figurin' out phwat to
do wild tn pot money, the Republican
rings in a cold deck on him. an tn mkt
daay tn Dimmacrat's thryin' t tell how
it happened.
In tn prisint iliction they goes to
wUrruk on tn Same plan. Whin livery
things ready to begin, Patsy he sindS fr
tn lads that's goin' to furnish tn wind
FIR HammOnds bullOon. FIT he says, If
were liver gOin' TO git him to Wash nt'n
he SAYS, we've got to implOy Andree'S
tictacs.' he says, f'r tn roads gOin' to
be trough he says, an tn weather
cold he saws. Now, he says. I want t
give We some p'inters about tn runnin' "
tn campaign, he says. Don't go TO
fOOlin' wild tn deep questions iv tn con-
tist.' he SAYS.
I've arranged he says, to have tn
platfOrrum printed he SAYS. and We can
carry a copy iv it in ye'er watch char
rum he saws. er betther still. We might
Dashte an ye'er thumb-naii, an whin tn
Dimmacrats spring anything about tn
DlatfOrrum, he says, eel have tn proof
handy he says. An We want to con-
make about tn platforrUm,' he says. If
they saay they'se anything in it, he
SAYS. deny it, he says, an raymimber
our motto Honey Sow 1t Qui Malice
Pensey.' which names in Irish, Honesty
is dam poor polytickle policy he
says. Nail tn flag TO the mast he says.
an don't let tn Ould schooner go down.
" Well saws Misther George SqUirts,
III have [ down a good NANNY schOOn-
ers.' he saws. 'befure m sthrOng enough,
he SAYS, to difind that platfOrrum-'
All right says Patsy, we can go
down 20 Saanpete. he says, an III pay
tn bill FIR REFRESHMENTS
Now he says, its NECESSARY that tn
min who ARE gOin' to sling tn lingual
hash iV this cOmpaaign,' he says, be in
sthructed on few iv tn fine p'ints,' he
says. so I'd loike TO be hearin' tn stand
ard bearer shpake his piece
Thin James he adjusts tn iXprissiOn
iv his frOntiSpiece, an he says, L stand
f'r tn Republican parity he says, an
1 Ony make One-night stands ayther' he
says, f'r fear tn people might git onto
me game, he says, 'befure 1 cU'd git out
" town. I'm a goldbug,' he says, with
free silver thrimminS. an tn thrimmin $
amt wurrth much, he says; dam tn
thrimmin's anyhow he says, TIL man 5
tn gOwdbug fr a that he says.
Me parrty's tn prosperity crowd he
says. Its great aim, in tn WurrudS iv tn
pote.' he says, has bin 10 make two Ray
pubhcanS flourish, he says, where but
wan was in Office befUre,' he says.
There niver was SIGH times he says.
as were now injyin', he says. Amt tn
min who sill sugar, an lie, an clothin'
an steel an tn riSt iY thin who farm tn
people fr Twin, he says, 'gittin' bet
Their prices f'r Their goods?' he says, an
ivry thing a-cOmin cur way he says.
IT'S aStOniShin' what wonderful things
tn administrator iv Mark is rayspon-
sible f'r,' he says, they'se goin' to be
good crops mkt year, an tbs all due to
tn confidence " the Almighty in the priS-
int governmint' he says.
Why. he says, 'whin was in Ca-ache