Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-07-31
Wei Hal Wei.

wei nal wei
At Shang Haikwan and at Cheefoo
Wen spend busy night or two,
And then, in case we don't go hang,
Wen run
slap-bang
through
Che Kiang-
st Louis Post Dispatch
At a large wedding reception in Buff
faio recently the attention of a couple of
girls was attracted to a rather hne-look-
Jag man, whose prematurely- gray hair
and clear-cut features combined in giving
him distinguished appearance, says the
ENQUIRER Il see him at nearly every
large wedding l go to-, said one Il
wonder who he can be. I've asked lots
of people and NOBODY seems to know.
Yet he seems to be invited everywhere.
Yes: I've noticed him, too, SAID the
other girl. While he APPARENT goes
TO all the big weddings. he doesn't seem
TO know ANYBODY; or at least I've never
seen him talking to anybody. He's such
an interesting-looking man. too. I'd love
to meet him. He looks like a man who
had lived and-and suffered
A young man standing near, who
couldn't help overhearing this conversa-
ton. laughed. Perhaps | can throw
some light upon the identity Of your
mysterious hero" he said. DO You
know him." exclaimed both girls in the
same breath. We'll, | cant say that
man: but l know who he is. He's
private detective Perhaps you have no
ticed that he never strays far away from
the tables on which the gifts are dis
PLAYED. That's what he's there for
to watch them. You know there aus
social hishwaymen in"
Lets go downstairs and get some
claret punch,' interrupted one of the
girls.
To Keep Cool.-Don't worry, and don't
worry because you can't help worrying.
Don't sit on hot stove.
Don't drink hot ScOtches, or LON and
Jerrys. or hot rum punches.
Don't talk politics-the other fellow Is
heat-producing fool anyway:
Don't get excited. If your dog is being
whipped. look at the thermometer ana re-
sign yourself to his fate.
Don't swear at the heat. Remember
the time you became profane When you
slipped in the snow six months age
Don't walk in the sun. Have it moved
if it blocks the way.
Don't hurry. Send the office boy.
Don't try to settle the Philippine cues
ton. The other fellow is just as much of
an anti-be-convinced as You are
Don't look at the Ice DILL. Think Oh
the ice.
Don't wear an overcoat.
Don't sleep between blankets.-Balt!-
more American.
A little girl carrying a big tin dinner
pail stopped on Broadway. New York,
in front of Trinity church the other
morning and began to cry She was a
pretty child with light curly hair and
very dirty face which was soon streakei
with tears Passers-by thought she was
lost, and a portly man who looked as If
he might have some youngsters OF MS
own, and accordingly would know what
to do in such a case, asked the child if
she knew where she lived At this very
sensible question she buried her face in
her hands and cried louder Finally
some one called policeman. An officer
appeared. who acted as if he had done
nothing else in his life but look after
lost children. Cheer up" he said kind
~, land I'll see if [ can find your father
and mother The little girl stopped
crying at once and the crowd murmured
its approval but the girl was not at all
pleased and she began to give the
policeman a piece of her mind in most
emphatic language. "Oh, chase your
self she said, 4 amt lost, and it
wouldn't be none of your business if l
hensive wave of her hand), youse people
make me tired. I'm taking pa his din
ner, and | just happened to think that
ma forgot to put in the coffee. and |
just know pail soak me when he sees
there amt none,' and she looked around
defiantly. The big policeman laughed.
I guess you and can settle him." he
said, and hand in hand. he and his little
charge went off to find pa"
A dear old lady with soft blue eyes,
white ringlets around her ears and a
quaint purple gown got on a Third street
car during the late torrid wave, says the
Salt Lake Tribune.
She looked rosy, but cool and comfort
able, while the others on the crowded car
were hopping their brows, tanning them
selves and cuSSing inwardly.
AS Miss 40 got on the car she said to
the conductor: Hi want to get hoff at
HIN street"
'.All right" said the con-. and the car
went on. Nothing happened until l.
street was reached, when suddenly the
old lady looked up and asked: H is
this help"
You bet it is" said a big perspiring
man. and soft, low cries of here, here, .
mingled with the laughter that rippled
through the car.
Probably no man was more keenly in
terested in the recent total eclipse OF the
sun than DR.. Edward Everett Hale.
The eminent New Highlander is now rs
years old yet he recently journey from
Boston to Hampton Roads to get within
the belt Of tOtality III order to enjoy a
new experience. The scientists watched
him with delight He was as excited
and enthusiastic as they. and his first
question after it was over was, When
will there be another?' They told him
that the next eclipse would occur in
Sumatra, in the island Of Java, and
would last about seven minutes. He at
once announced his intention to attend
the event, saying it quite worth the
thousands CT miles of travel to go
through the keen mental sensation. DR..
Hale told the group Of scientists with
him a characteristic anecdote. He said
when he was a child his father delighted
in telling a story to point the greatness
of Exeter, \. H., his native town. Hun>
dreds of country people from Hampton,
nearby village. came to Exeter to view
an eclipse. His father met many farm
ers he had known in the village and
asked them what they were in Exeter
for. ITO see the eclipse" they an
severed But why NOT STAY in yOur own