Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1900-11-16

4Dh1zREs'

do you believe that one man can
love two women ut the same timer"
eyes; If neither of them notices it!''-
Unsere Gesellschaft.
A Clever Turn: What a pretty felt
hat that is Of Mrs. Flypp's.' Yes;
that's her summer hat turned around
with the back to the front."-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Fltznoodle Ito gamekeeper)-When I
was in Australia l shot the biggest kan
CARGO the natives said they ever saw!
Gamekceper-Hindeed, sir! What was
you a-haimin' at?-Tit-Bits.
Mrs. O'Reagan-Dil yez cver how yer
palm read, Mrs. O'Reilly? Mrs. O'Rcilly.
-Phwat a question, Mrs. O'Reagan.
Haven't OF had ten children am had to
spank all of thim?-Judge.
Chance for a Hero: when / marry.
1T will he a brave hero, who fears moth
Ing" May-Ies, dear; l am sure you
will never we'd any other kind of q
man.-Philadclphia Bulletin.
Gas 1 came by the kitchen window,
Jane. l thought | saw you on Il young
mans knee!!" well. ma'um, it is an
artist friend of mine. ard l have been
giving him a few s:ttlngs."-Fun.
Barber-sla!l 1 take a little of the
ends of your hair Off, Sir: Customer
Yes; l think YOU had better take it off
at the ends, unless you can get it out of
the middle.-Glasgow Evening Times.
Shelf YOU love me so much, why
don't you prove it by some act of couy-
age. He-Great Scott! haven't l been
hanging around for two hours when
you We're playing golf?-Broollyn Life.
The Three Degrees: .Johnny-Paw,
what do they mean when they say q
man takes things easy" paw-That
he is either a philosopher, Il kodak fend,
or q Observation-Disclosures Ameri-
can.
Mother-Tommy, what makes you so
late? Tommy-lIad some words with
the teacher, and she kept me in after
school,. Mother-You had words with
the teacher? Tommy-Yes, mother.
couldn't spell 'em.-l'it-Bits.
A Clever Compliment: Husband
You surely do not intend 10 buy that
magnificent nativity, people would
think that YOU wished to distract their
attention from Your Neutrality-suspicious.
fer Blaetter.
Teacher-Now, children, suppose this
classroom were suddenly enveloped in
flames, and escape cut off, what would
be the best thing to do to prevent loss
of life? Tommy Tatters-Keep COOL
Judge.
"1t has always been my rule" said
MI. Eoleln. ito spend as l go" I'm
Decd" exclaimed Miss Sharpe. glanc-
Ing significantly at the clock. I'm that
way suppose you have saved consid-
cradle Observation-Disclosures Press.
Its been four years now,' said the
deserted lady, since he left me and
his happy home. l remember it lust
as We'll as Nesterlay-how he stood at
the door. holding it open till six flies
got in the Observation-Disclosures Press.
Mrs. Highblower-IIow quiet your
little boy is, Mrs. Slimson! Really a
model youth. Willie Slimson-Well,
mother told me not to say anything to
embarrass you while l was here, and I
haven't dared to open my mouth
Smart Set.
The Sure Road: The Cld-stagcr-
Young man, ii you would be successful,
you must do two things. First, get
some enemies. The Aspirant-And sec
ond! The Old-staser-Secord, irritate
them so that they will make you prom
inent.-BaZar.
"Ah, George" she sighed, do YOU
remember how we used to sit on one
chair at papa's:" That was all right
at papa's," replied the practical George.
chairs cost me good money..'-Cleve-
land Plain Dealer.
do you know" said his confidential
clerk, breaking it to him as delicately
as he could, that some people accuse
you of leading Il double life?' by
George, l do" exclaimed Mr.. Spotcash,
tue eminent merchant; II work twice
as hard as any man in nay employ."-
Chicago Tribune.
This a great story said the new re-
porter, hut | can't think of Il good
head for it. It's about IL trusted en-
ploye. whose accounts were found to be
crooked, and~wllen lie was accused of
it dropped dead" That's easy" said
the Snake Editor. hclpfully; head it
Died from Exposure. "-Philadelphi
Press.
Noble Little George: Proud Mamma
Wasn't Georgia 81 noble little gentle
man to insist upon Nellie's helping her
self to II peach before he took one him
self? Uncle Henry-Oh, yes, very no.
BILE. George, what made you let Nellie
help herself first? Gcorgic-Because
there wasn't but two peaches. a great
big one and a little bit of one. I knew
Nellie would be too polite to take the
big onc.-Boston Transcript.