The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1900-09-02
Thi. way Madness Lies.

The scientists who educated womankind
up to the danger Of long trains have moi
lived in vain. Here, for one case in point
is an account of a microbe mad nader
given by a writer In the Chicago Herald
There was once mlcrobe fend. Sh'
set the house afire trying to sterilize milk
She talked germs and bacilli till the neigh.
bors shunSed her. She read that microbe:
lodged behind wall paper. so the deco
rators were called in and proceeded to fill
the house with pals of kalsomine, bis
slappy brushes and tidal wives of to-
bacco .moke- Before they were through
with the Iuuss the family had suffered the
following losses: One ancient and be-
loved mahogany table hopelessly scratched
and disigured; one bad case Of Group for
the baby, complete annihiiation OF the best
jardinier, and perturbed temper for each
individual member OF the household.
In the street cars this girl never held
onto strap, because. according to the no.
lions of certain scientists, these straps
are invested with germs of more kinds and
deadly varieties than you can shake stick
at When telephoning she heard replies
family, for she held the g4rm laden Ie-
eeiver's arms length away.
On her shopping tours her bacilIi ideas
were right with her. She edged around as
II she were threading the lanes OF a pest
breeding village. and waited for the crowds
to pass lest she be exposed to contagion OF
one sort or another When she bought an
underbodice for IS cents she promptly boil
ed it before even investigating the bead
ing or the edging thereon.
She certainly was a microte fiend
Whenever she went out to luncheon she
told hair-raising stories Of the chances of
death in food, and made everybody hate
the sight of her. When she wasn't talking
germs 1t was antisceptics. and when II
wasn't antisceptics it was microbes or ba-
cill or something else unknown, unde-
Enable and terrible.
AT her entrance In grocery the clerks
FED in alarm. She always insisted that ev-
cry purchase be wrapped In extra clean
paper taken from the inside OF the ream
and shaken carefully. The kitchen maid
said that she was just waiting for that
girl to sterilize the raspberries and the Gu
cumbers before they were served. Her
dearest foe said mean things about her,
but the girl needed not. She was microbs
mad, and there wasn't any help for her.
But one day when the fiend was riding
along on a car she did what many less
careful feminine mortal does She held
her 5-cent piece between her lips while
she buttoned her gloves. Whether she died
or not, l don't know ! am merely telling
this tale to show you that however care
full and clearly a woman may be. she Is
likely to succumb TO this loathsome and
uncleanly habit.
The sight of woman with a coin be-
tween her lips is not pleasant one Fan
cy me history of scent piece. In the
pockets of fruit vender perhaps; the
plaything against other coins that are
constantly being given from one person
to another II there is anything on the
face of the Lords beautiful green earth
that has an al chance TO collect germs of
all brands make and manufacture. Ii is
the small coin. How woman can be so
careless as to hold these very much soil
ed nickels and dimes between their lips is
more than l know.
Talk about microbes behind wall paper
or in milk bottle or on car straps-Td
take my chances SO times of 100 with them
before I'd expose myself to the germs on
pin money that travels here, there. and
heaven knows where.