The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-07-21


novel written in Chinese dialect would be
simply awful. indianapolis Journal.
st tell you, the ballet is on its last legs
exclaimed a. reformer.
replied the man who is satisfied with
things as they are.-Detroit Free Press.
Great Publisher-It looks as if they were
going to have some trouble catching old
Assistant-It does. indeed.
Well, you would better arrange to
have our volume From Cape Town to
From Pretoria to Kruger Life.
president Hadley of Yale talked to the
of Patience -
THAT would have sounded better if ad-
dressed to a medical class exclusively.''-
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
every dog has his dayl' sighed the
rhinoceros, trying not to feel hurt at the
laughter of the crowd. It's true my hide
the fluffy effects come in againY'-Detroit
Journal
Bighead--Don't you think that divorce
tends to discourage. matrimony?
GayDoy-Not at ALL AS the poet might
They marry now who never did before,
And those already wed now wed the more.
Life.
Jess-Is she really so awfully homely?
who graduated with her wouldn't allow
her to figure in the composite photograph
OF the claSs.-Philadelphia Press.
Mixed up with nominations
In convention, opine
VIII be noted combinations
OF the palm-leaf fan and stein.
Chicago Record.
The Healer-Your greatest need, madam,
is to place yourself in harmony with the
The Willing One-But how can that be
done?
For 50 a treatment"-Life.
My love whirls past in her automobile.
With calm and scOrnful eye;
And I, from my seat in the cable, steal
A glance at her, and sigh
For I am a clerk at ten per week,
And she is an heiress great.
take my rides on the cable, meek
And she goes forth in state.
But Fate, in vain your barrier-lo!
She waits for me afar.
Her auto. calls for a friendly tow,
Brooklyn Life.
That Funeral.-EmployerA much
feeling g, shown at your grandmother'S fu7
the umpire. "-Harper's Bazaar.
Husband-It would be. fine if we could
get some nice summer place near the city
where could see you every day
Wife-But it would cost so much.
Husband-Not nearly so much as if you
We're out of my reach--Detroit Free
Press.
ST went out. the other. day and paid $
for 1 an um Ibaf hand and e for straw hat
1.-The next day I left the umbrella at
home and was caught in thunderstorm
DO you think Fate arranged the COM
bination especially for you?
days in snlaa chieago 1911 Tmes
Herald.
Pene1ope-What made George and Alice
break their engagement?
too "effeminate'' for the present day.
Brooklyn Life
steam beer delivery wagon. They ex-
pect it will hustle the beer around good
deal Easter than the horse-dra.wn wagons
can"
Il suppose, it will, halt in front of a
customers place and whistle"
'sThat would be appropriate for a drink
WHATS appropriated"
'"Toots' -Cieveland Plain Dealer.
Mrs. Bingo-Lets go to church today,
Bingo-No, thanks. There's one day in
the week want to have rest from that
miniSter.-Itfe.
In the Nature of an obstacle.-Guide-
(also a goifist)-'Ahi that was a bunker,
to be sure I'-Puck.
''My wife" boosted the happy young
Benedict lis an open book to me- Mine
too,'' declared the old married man. Il
can't shut her up.''-Philadelphia Press.
Up-to-Date Decoration.-'Ma, haven't
we got an old doorplate or old brass
knocker somewhere around the house?'
What do you want with 1T, daughter?'
why ma, I need some kind of a stun
ming gimcrack to wear on the back of
my belt. "-Indianapolis Journal.
The rural editor started violently. How |
does it happen he asked. struggling to
be calm, that you are paying your sub |
scription in money and not in cordwood?'' |
''Oh, I've got money to burn this year.
of his kind.-Detroit Jour