davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
A Snecfalist.

A few days ago a we'll known Wash
ington lady, being unexpectedly bereft
of her kitchen assistance, advertised
for a colored woman capable of per-
forming general homework.
The first caller in response to the ad-
vertisement was a mulatto damsel, be-
decked with ribbon and finery. From
her airs and graces she might have
been a graduate of a seminary. She
announced that she had noticed the adj
vertisement and was DESTROYS of Sc
curing employment.
care you a good cook?" inquired the
lady of the house.
mo, indeed, I don't cook" was the
reply.
''Are you a good washer and ironer"
was the next query.
II wouldn't do washing and ironing;
it's too hard on the hands," declared
the caller.
"Can you sweep" the housewife then
wanted to know.
NO" was the answer, and it was q
positive one. I'm not strong enough
for that
''Well, in the name of goodness, what
can you doF' said the lady of the
house, exasperated. The placid reply
was:
Il dusts. "-Washington Star.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
Burying a Spanish King.

Strange and almost weird is the cere-
fnonisI which accompanies the burial
bf Spanish kings. The pantheon, or
Royal tomb, is at the palace of the
Escurial. situated 5000 feet above the
level of the sea and some distance
from the capital. Only kings, queens
Ind mothers of kings are buried there,
the collins of the kings lying on one
side, those of the queens on the OTHER.
After lying in state for several days
In the throneroOm in Madrid an enor-
nous procession is formed, accompany
ing the body to the Escurial A halt
Is made on the way, and the corpse
rests there for one night.
In the morning the lord high cham
berlain stands at the side of the coffin
and says in loud tones, ''Is your males
NY pleased to proceed on your jour-
ney?" After a short silence the pro-
cession moves on and winds up to the
grand portal of the palace. These
doors are never opened except to ad-
init royal parsonage, dead or alive.
when the casket containing the re-
mains is at last placed in the vault,
the chamberlain unlocks it and, kneel-
ing down, calls with a loud voice:
"Senor! Senior! Senior"
After q solemn pause he cries again:
f''His majesty does not reply. Then it
is true, the king is deadP'
He then locks the coffin, gives the
key to the prior and, taking his staff
of office, breaks it in pieces and filings
them at the casket. The booming of
the guns and the tolling of bells an
nounce to the nation that the king has
gone to his final resting place.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

There is more catarrh in this section of the
country than all other diseases put together,
and until the last few years was supposed to
be incurab1e. For great many years doc
tors pronounced it a local disease and pre-
scribed local remedies, and by constantly
failing to cure with local treatment pro-
noun ced it incurable. Science has proven
catarrh to be a constitutional disease, and
therefore requires constitutional treatment.
Halls Catarrh Cure, manufactured by F. J..
Cheney & Co., Toledo, Ohio, is the only con-
stitutional cure the market. 1t is taken
internally in doses from 10 drops to a tea
spoonful. 1t acts directly on the blood and
mucous surfaces of the system. They offer
one hundred dollars for any case it fails to
cure. Send for circulars and testimonials.
Address, FL CHENEY & CO., Toledo, O.
Sold by Druggists, 75c.
Halls Family Pills are the best.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
To the pure all things are pure.

To the pure all things are pure.
A good laugh is sunshine in house.
Children have more need of models
than of critics.
He who believes in nobody knows
that he himself is not to be trusted.
Drive prejudices out by the door,
they will re enter by the windows.
Minorities lead and save the world,
and the world knows them not till
long afterwards.
We sometimes think that we hate
fattery, but we only hate the way in
which we are fattered.
Let us be of good cheer, remember
ing that the misfortunes hardest to
bear are those which never happen.
We are haunted by an ideal life, and
it is because we have within us the
beginning and the possibility Of it.
All who have been great and good
without Christianity would have been
much greater and better with it. If
there be, amongst the sons of men, q
single exception to this maxim, the
learned Socrates may be allowed to
put in the strongest claim. 1t was
his high ambition to deserve by deeds,
not by creeds, an unrevealed heaven,
and by works, not by faith, to enter
an unpromised land.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

There were 903 post offices in 1900.
Today we have 75,OOO-that is, in
America alone. It took a letter six
teen days to go from Philadelphia to
lexington; twenty two days to Nash
vile. The cheapest letter postage
was eight cents, and to send letter
more than 100 miles cost shilling.
Three million letters and papers were
then sent in a year. At the present
time the post office handles about
80, 900, 900 pieces of mail in a single
day.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
The Hog.

No other animal has been more modi-
fed by civilization and none reverts
more quickly to the original wild type
than the hog. Three generations Of
running wild suffice to turn the smooth,
round, short shouted raZorback or
hazel splitter, thin, lank, leggy, lop-
cared, sharp shouted an Ishmael in
bristles, running like a deer, if running
be possible, fighting as only a wild hog
can fight when battle is imperative.
The tusks, which have been half oblit-
|erated in the process of civilization,
get back size and strength. At year
old they are formidable, at 2, murder
|ous; at 3 or 5, more deadly than
|sword. They afford a certain index
|of age up to years, but are common
|ly broken in fights long before that
time. Wild boars are very i'll temper
led and, when worsted in fighting, often
revenge themselves by ripping the
bark from trees as high as they can
reach.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
LADIES' COLUMN.


AS scarlet fever is infec tious, and
likely to cause trouble if the necessary
precautions are not taken to prevent
its spreading, few hints regarding
it's proper treatment, and the impor-
lance of thoroughly disinfecting the
patients surroundings, may prove Of
use to the mother Or other head of the
household where this disease has
found its way.
In the first place no person should
be allowed to enter the patients room
other than the doctor and the nurse
or attendant, who should be careful to
provide herself with a long gown to
cover the ordinary clothes, and which
should be put on and taken off on
entering and leaving the sick cham
Der.
The mouth should be kept closed as
much as possible whilst in the vicinity
of the patient. The hands and face
should be kept scrupulously clean, and
rendered antiseptic by washing in a
weak solution of Condy's Fluid or BIZ
chloride of Mercury q in 10000.
The hair should be anointed daily
with carbolized oil, as this is the most
likely part of the body to become in
fected.
The attendant should adhere to the
above rules, and should Thoroughly OBJ
serve the following in regard to the
patient:
1. A basin charged with "Izal''
should be kept constantly beside the
bed for the patient to expectorate
into.
2. A large vessel, also charged with
a disinfecting fluid, should be kept in
or near the room for the reception of
all bed or body linen Immediately on
it's removal from the person of the
patient.
3. A small piece of cotton cloth
should be used, instead of handker-
chiefs, for wiping the patients nose.
Each piece after being once used
should be Immediately burned.
4. A good supply of towels and two
basins, one containing water with
OlSluI0CCduUS3 duu duOUuoT Will pIdlA
soap and water, should be always at
hand for the removal of specific ex-
creta.
5. All glasses, cups, Or other vessels
used by or about the patient, should
be thoroughly cleansed before being
used by others.
6. When "desquamation" Cor the
peeling of the skim sets in, which will
probably. be after the fifth or sixth
day, the surface of the patients body,
including the scalp, should be anoint-
ed, twice daily, with carbolized oil.
This is of the very greatest impor-
lance, and should be continued until
the desquamation has ceased. The
patient will then take warm bath
every day until four have been taken,
the whole Of the body and scalp being
we'll scrubbed with lipbuoy or carbolic
soap.-HousehoJd
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

Now if you do not want the boys
and girls to become anxious to leave
you, you must not put off until the
future the happiness you might enjoy
every day. On the other hand, no one
in this fair land of ours should be sat
isfied with the bare necessities of life.
Coward and Upward" is the watch
word of progress. If your home is
only a lowly cottage every effort
should be made to brighten and beau
tify it. Oh, how much can be done
along this line, without expense, too,
if one will use good Judgment and
utilize the odd moments. Make a
start on your part and see how quick
ly the children acquire taste for the
beautiful; the cultivation of this taste
has an eIevating touch that leads on
to refinement and education, and it is
through these agencies that the far
mer's wife must expect to make her
home lastingly attra ctive to her boys
and girls. 1t is only through these
channels that she can arouse and
AWAKEN Une nIgner, HOOler QUALITIES Oh
a child's nature. We must not forget,
in the scramble to get on in the world,
that "life is more than meat and body
than raiment." Teach your children
the true value of good literature and
they will be as anxious as yourself to
save up the nickles and dimes for
their annual box of Christmas books
and annual subscriptions to their
favorite periodicals.-F Florida Agricul
tatrist.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
THE GRUMBLER.

Some people would convert life's
sweetest songs into funeral dirges.
They have no use for cheer, for flow
ers, for praise. Their voices are dole
full, their homes cherries, their
prayers complaints. With them
everything is wrong, nothing is right.
In writing of such, DR.. John Todd in
his apt way said:
''Some people are always 'out Of
Sorts The weather is always what
they don't want. I met one Of these
men awhile ago, farmer, who raised
all manner of crops. 1t was wet day,
and said: MIR. N, this weather will
be fine for your grass crops
g yes, perhaps; but it is bad for the
corn, and will keep it back. I don't
believe we shall have CROP
IA few days after this, when the
sun was shining hot, said: Fine sun
for your corn, SIR
Eyes, pretty fair; but it is awful
for the rye. Rye wants cold weather.
"Again on cold morning met my
neighbor, and said: This must be cap
ital weather for your rye, Mr.. NJ
Eyes; but it is the very worst
weather for the corn and grass. They
want heat to bring them forward
''The world is full of such complain
ers. They keep society in ferment.
Everyone who comes in contact with
them is made unhappy. Their faces
are long, their spirit is sour, their
words are doleful. With such people
everything is 'out of Sorts Whether
the weather is hot or cold, dry or wet,
whether the sun shines or is obscured
by the clouds, under all circumstances,
there is the same gloomy cutlery. If
the weather is good for the wheat, it
is bad for the rye; if is good for the
corn, it is bad for the wheat. Thus
they drag through their lot of COM
planning, and nothing that God can do
for them, nor the whole realm of His
providence, renders them at all COM
fortable.''
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
ETHICS OF THE PEN.

A woman should keep in mind the
following rules for letter writing, says
the Boston Herald:
Business letters must be concise
and clear, because business people
are supposed to be busy.
No letter is complete without a
date.
In writing to solicit employment of
any kind on no account should per-
sonal perplexities Or needs be men
toned. The world is full of unfortu
nate persons, and to a stranger the
troubles of one are no more than those
Of host of others.
Letters of introduction are left open
when written.
deliberately ornamented note paper
as we'll as highly perfumed notes, are
vulgar.
When answering letters, remember:
That an ambiguous sentence is like
ly to be nisinterpreted.
That friendly words never harm.
That written word of sympathy
can sometimes do much good.
That letter written in friendly
way shou be answered in that same
way, even though the message is dis
liked.
That busine SIS letters and invitations
must be answered at once.
That one should acknowledge any
friendly offer of hospitality even
though it is not accepted.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

z Mr.. w. S. Whedon, cashier of the First
National Bank of Winterset, Iowa, in a re-
cent letter gives some experience with a
carpenter in his employ, that will be of value
to other mechanics. He says: az had a car
penter working for me who was obliged to
stop work for several days on account of be-
ing troubled with diarrhoea. mentioned to
him that had been similarly troubled and
that Chamberlain Collie, Cholera and
Diarrhoea Remedy had cured me. He bought
a bottle of it from druggist here and in
formed me that one dose cured him, and he is
again at his work" For sale by E. w. Barron,
Druggist.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
PATS Ready Wit.

An Irishman who was travelling
through London met two Englishmen,
who thought they would play joke on
[him.
One of them said: "Good morning,
pat! Did you hear the devil is dead?''
The Irishman put his hand in his
pocket and gave each a copper.
They asked what this was for, to
which he replied:
"'Tis always a custom in ould Ire
land, when the father is dead, to give
something to the poor orphansw
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

Charles Kingsley's advice to indo-
lent people was: 'Thank God every
morning that you have something to
do that day which must be done,
whether you like it COR not. Being
forced to work and forced to do your
best, will breed in you temperance and
self control. diligence and strength of
will, cheerfulness and content, and a.
hundred virtues which the idle never
know. Exchange.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

Uncle (who left his nephew refresh
(ng'C-Well, Tommy, you see I'm back.
Are you ready? What have I to pay,
miss?
Waitress-Three buns, four sponge
fakes, two sandwiches, one jelly, five
tartS and
Uncle-Good gracious, boy! Are you
bot i'll?
Tommy-NO, uncle, but I'm very
thirsty.-London Tit-Bits.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

I thought I'd just drop in, dear boy,
knowing that you were having few
friends to dinner, and hearing there
were just thirteen. You know your
wife is so superstitious about that
number. Quite a mistake, my Gear
fellow, we are just twelve. Well, Pill
stay anyhow, if only to laugh your
wife out of her whim.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

If troubled with rheumatism, give Chamberln's
Pain-Balm trial. It will not cost you cent if it
does good. One application will relieve the
pain. II also cures sprains and bruises in one
third the time required by any other treatment.
Cuts, burns, frostbites quinsey, pains in the side
and chest, glandular and other swellings are
quickly cured by applying it. Every bottle war
ranted. Price, 25 and SO cents. For sale by Bar
ron & Hamblet.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
Buchanan, Mich, May %

GeneSsee Pure Food Co.:
Gentlemen:-My mamma has been great
coffee drinker and has found it very injuri-
Gus. Having used several packages of your
GRAIN the drink that takes the place of
coffee, she finds it much better for herself
and for US children to drink. She has given
up coffee drinking entirely. We use pack
age every week. I am ten years old.
Yours respectfully, FANNIE WILLIAMS.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

To keep the bre ad b OK in good con-
dition it should be washed, scalded
and thoroughly aired in the sun twice
a week. Every cook should remem-
Der that all bread and cake must be
thoroughly cooled before being put in
boxes Or jars; for if it is put in when
warm the steam which arises will
cause it to mold quickly.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11

Reports show that over fifteen hundred
lives have been saved through the use of One
Minute Cough Cure. Most of these were
cases of grippe, Group, asthma, whooping-
cough. bronchitis and pneumonia. It's early
use prevents consumption.
81. 9. Pierce, Barton; r. E. French, Glover;
h. S. Webster, Barton Landing; CIV. Russell,
Irasbnrgh.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
State Printing.

The Commissioners of Estate Printing, in
accordance with Section 1924 of the Vermont
Statutes, as amended by Section of No. 1873
of the acts of 1898, hereby advertise for sepa-
two years from the first day of August, 1900,
under the following subdivisions:
1. Journals of the Senate and House of
Representatives. each in one volume.
2. The laws of the biennial and extra ses-
sions.
8: The report of the State superintendent
4. The report of the Insurance Commits
sioners.
5. The volume known as estate Officers
Reports including the reports of Auditor of
nance; Commissioner of State Taxes; Adju-
tant and Inspector General and Quarter
master General; Sergeant Arms; Super
boro Retreat; Trustees of the Vermont State
Hospital for the Insane; officers of the State
Prison; officers of the House of Correction;
Vermont Industrial School; University of
Vermont; Board of Dental Examiners; Print
ing Commission; Secretary of State.
6. House bills and reports of House Com
mittees.
T. Senate bills and reports of Senate Com
mitttes.
8. Legislative Directory.
9. Report of State Library Commission.
10. Report of Board of Agriculture and
Dalrymen'S Association.
IL. Report of State Geologlst.
II. Other Miscellaneous printing.
On request made to the Printing Commits
sioners specifications for any or all of the
foregoing subdivisions will be furnished to
persons desiring to bid. Each bid must be
accompanied by a satisfactory bond in the
missioners, and bids must be filed with the
Commissioners before July 2, 1900 on
which day, at two O'Clock p. M, they will be
opened at the Office of the Auditor of Ac-
counts in the state House at Montpelier.
Correspondence should be addressed to Com
missioners on State Printing, Montpelier, VT.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
A sPRAINED ANKLE QUICKLY CURED,

cat one time 1 suffered from severe sprain
of the ankle,'' says Geo. E. Cary, editor of the
Guide, Washington, Va. CATER using sew
eral we'll recommended medicines withou
success, tried Chamberlain's Pain Balm, and
am pleased to say that relief came soon as
1 began its use and a complete cure speedily
followed. For sale by E. w. Barron, Drug
oict
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1900-06-11
Lydia E. pinkham's Vegetable Compound

That the utmost reliance
CAR be placed Xys0ss this
great RssexScfsse IS feSff-
fled to by an army of
grateful women who have
been helped by it,
AAs:s- Pzsskksazs,z who mas
the greatest and most
successful experience i'm
the world TO qualify her,
will advise you free of
cfas'ge1 Her address is
LYNN Mass Write TO her.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1900-10-23
STRICTLY SCIENTIFIC.
Only One Pile Cure Which Can Be Con-
sidercd Such.

The Pyramid Pile Cure is strictly
scientific both In Its composition and
in Its therapeutic action, and the best
feature is that It is perfectly harm.
lese. No i'll effects ever result from
its use.
The cure is accomplished painIessly
by the astringent properties and heal.
ing oils contained In 1t, which cause
the little tumors and congested blood
vessels to contract and the obstruc,
tion to the circulation to be removed.
The Pyramid Pile Cure is In suppos,
itory form and far superior to any
salve or ointment for convenience.
1t is applied at night and absorbed
into the sensitive rectal membrane,
acting both as local and a constitu-
tlonal treatment.
One 90 cent box of the Pyramid
has often been effectual, even In cases
of many years standing
Relief from pain and itching is so
immediate that patients sometimes
imagine that the remedy must contain
some form of cocaine or opium, but a
careful analysis shows it to contain
no cocaine, anaesthetic or injurious
drug of any kind. II is guaranteed
free from any deleterious substance.
The ligature treatment, the knife,
ar the still more cruel treatment by
dilation, besides causing intense pain
and sometimes collapse and death, are
now known to have little value as far
as permanent cure is concerned.
Thousands Of pile sufferers bear wit
ness to the value of the Pyramid Pile
Cure and even in cases where dan.
gerous surgical operation has failed
to cure surprising results have been
obtained from this remedy after a
weeks use.
A complete treatment Of the Prya'
mid Pile Cure is sold by druggists
everywhere at fifty cents.
The Pyramid Drug Co., of Marshall
Mich, will mail to any address a lit
tie book on cause and cure of piles
and a list of cured patients from all
parts of the United States.
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1900-10-23

N. L. Glover's Glee club may never be
known. True it is, that the club was
in fine form and never appeared to
better advantage. Had the speaker
taken recess occasionally and per-
united the campaign singers to eX-
pound the doctrine of prosperity and
benevolent assimilation in song, the
chair-emptying business would not
have been carried on upon such a large
scale. The speaker had only reached
his "firstly' when the crowd began to
straggle. But that does not mean that
they left Immediately. According to
Senator Allison's method of speech
making, he does not reach his firstly"
until some time has elapsed Then there
is always a long run between firstly"
and secondly" and so on. BY the time
the speaker had talked an hour, a large
number had left, and the habit was
growing. 1t even reached the platform
where it became contagious and the
exodus, by means of the gallery, was
humiliating to those in charge of the
meeting. BY the time the speaker reel
ed off the second hour the stampede
was general. 1t was a quiet, orderly
stampede, but from all parts OF the
hall they were leaving in twos, threes
and groups, When the meeting closed
at the expiration of 40 minutes of con-
tinuous performance, as the theatrical
people say, there was plenty of room
in the old building. Big blocks of seats
in the rear had been vacated and only
emptiness remained. What appeared
like q rush at the door when the
Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1900-10-23
HALLOWEEN.
All Its Franks and Capers
Will Soon be Here.
Jack.o.Lanterns Of All Sizes and
Shapes Are Being Made.

The season Of jack LANTERNS is at
hand and the small boys are making
experimental sallies into the streets
with a half-hidden pumpkin under
their arms. In the cellars at home,
each one Of them has big yellow fel-
low picked out and the way he will
scare pedestrians is wonderful to re-
late. But it will be several days yet
before the big pumpkin is brought out
and its fat plump side transformed in
to a most hdeous looking object. The
boys are waiting for Halloween, Oct
81. From behind every tree a grotes-
que figure will poke its head and
ghosts will stalk up and down the
streets with impunity. Strange shad-
ows will stealthily steal across the
path of the nocturnal pedestrian and