davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1900-06-30
The Faber and the Scissors.

Our excellent contemporary, the
Homer Guardian Journal, Wa re-
greet to say, has sick editor, hear
him:
Life has been drag with us
for several weeks past, and, Oh
that account, we have edited the
paper more largely with the scls-
sors than is usual with us. We
do not feel, however, that we need
apologize to our readers, as the
paper is, doubtless, more interest
ing when edited with the scissors
than when edited with the pen.
We shall continue this policy
through the Summer unless we
feel better"
Now, we want our friend Hulse
to get better. We advise him to
take a tonic and brace up. WEI
make a distinct issue with him
about the superiority of his excel
lent journal, when edited with the
scissors over it when edited with
his pen. We do not depreciate
the ability Of the scissors in the
work of editorship. Indeed, an
intelligent man with pair of scis-
sors can get up a very readable
and instructive paper, provided he
has an extensive exchange list.
But the agreeable part of our work
is reading the views from exchan-
ges expressing their ideas on diff
ferent subjects, and pretty much
all the inspiration we get is from
the editorials of our country con-
temporaries. From them We learn
the commercial and industrial con-
dition of all the different parishes;
we learn from them the varied
views on political and other sub
jects of interest in every nook and
corner of Louisiana, Texas and
Mississippi. Indeed, city daily
would be but a poor affair if it
were not for its country exchan-
ges.
And there is NO reason why our
country neighbors should be con-
stantly cracking jokes at their own
expense about their poverty.
Every year the great city dailies
are growing less the organs OF
thought and the mere machines
for the circulation of news, and in
the same ratio the country papers
should increase in intelligence vi
gor and influence.
A few days ago a Mississippi
country contemporary referred to
the type-setting machines as an.
other blow at the country press
In our opinion, the type-settine
machines mark long step on the
road to the time when the country
journal is to become the organ Of
political and economic thought
and the real force in American 20
litics, and the city daily only 6
news-dispensing machine.
What our country editors shoul6
do instead of bringing themselves
into ridicule by prating of theil
poverty is to rise to the dignity o.
the destiny that awaits them; TAXI
more pains with the appearance o.
their papers, study more attentive
ly the great questions of the day
and discuss them editorialy Il
their constituencies. Perhaps We
may not live to see the time, but
in our opinion the day is soon t.
come when the intelligence, learn
ing, ability and power of the press
will be concentrated in the coun
try papers, and the city dailie'
will draw their inspiration on al
leading questions from the abb
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1900-06-30
Results of Cheap Printing
Contract.

contract.
Our esteemed contemporary, the
vicksburg Herald, under the above |
has the following inter-
esting piece of information:
I'm the search for cheap work
the State Printing Board has had
a lesson that ought to be of value,
in the future. The pubic is al
ready familiar with the failure OF
the concern contracted with to
furnish the department reports in
time for them to be of any use to
the legislature. This shortcom-
ing has been succeeded by seri-
GUS delay in providing assessment
rolls for the various counties.
And now that they have been sent
out, the work is subjected to the
following criticism by the Grena-
da Sentinel-a paper thoroughly
competent to pass judgment on
printing work:-Vicksburg Her
aid.
$50 hurriedly did Auditor Cole
aand tba rolls ont that evidently
he did not take time to inspect
them and learn that they are alb
solutely unfit for use, and the
Board of Contracts which has &C
cepted them has been derelict OF
duty. The assessment rolls are
books that must be handled
through term of years, and the
records therein contained are i'm
portant for preservation. The
books received by the officials Of
Grenada county contain paper that
lis but little better than common
book paper, and upon which. the
ink runs and blurs, making the
writing illegible and unsatisfacto.
Try. They are not we'll bound and
before half the term Of their USE
fulness is run they will be in
pieces. The officials who are to
use them are expressing their dis
Igust in no uncertain terms and
with Just cause. Such. books "
these are dear if they were giver
to the State absolutely. without
cost. In such contracts the work
should be given to reliable houses
and at q price which would enable
good work to be DONE"
Cheap printing, like most Other
things, like cheap men especially
is nasty printing. What is neces
sary to be done for the public in
terest is worth doing we'll. Thu
public do not want cheap and mas
lty work. During the last Stat
campaign in Louisiana the Repub
lican fusionists had much to 90,
about the .extrsvagance of tn
. printing contract under Governo
Fosters administration and CAV
in contrast the very small amour
paid for similar work by Mississ
ppi The Vicksburg Herald ant
the Grenada Sentinel show th'
quality of the work Mississippi
got for her cheap contracts. o.
. the other hand, the work done b.
the Louisiana contractor, who wa
: q home man and q Democrat, di,
UNNECESSARILY more work and di
it in first class style and ever.
man employed on it was q nativ
or settled citizen of the State. Be
sides his paper valisntly tough
throught various campaigns tn
battles of the Democratic part,
and its services were worth te
times over the amount of the COZ
tract. Mr.. Chevis has again beef
awarded the contract and the worl
will again be done in 6rst-clas
atvlo and choan M frat clasa nriu
The weekly messenger. [volume] (St. Martinsville [i.e. St. Martinville] La.) 1886-1948, 1900-06-30
SHERIFF'S SALE.
State Of Louisiana. Parish OF st. Martin,
10th Judicial District Court,
No. 1868,
ST. MARTINS OIL WORKS LIMITED.
L. II. BERNARD,

BY virtue Of writ Of seizure and sale
issued 10 the above entitled and num-
bered suit and to me directed BY the
Hon. 10th Judicial District Court In and
for the Parish Of st. Martin, dated May
23rd. 1900. l have seized and will pro-
coed to sell at public auctien to tho last
and highest bidder at the Court HOUSE
door in the town Of st. Martinville DO.
tween the legal hours on
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
LnuEhinE Gas For Poets

1t Is over hundred years since nj
trOuS OXide-the gas which So many Of
us associate with the dentists chair
was first Intentionally inhaled The
experiment was made by Sir Humphry
DaVy and was the result Of = report
published by a brother chemist that
laughing gas, called by him oxide Of
septon, was the cause and basis OF all
cOntagiOn.
Cautious experiments made with the
diluted gas produced no III effects. and
DaVy proceeded 10 inhale couSiderab BILE
quantities of the pure gas Contrary
TO his expectations. the effects were
highly pleaSurable. Thrills Of pleasure
pervaded his body. and his mind was
filed with ideas and emotions OF the
most exalted kind, which. however.
were very indiStinct when the effect of
the gas passed of.
1t occurred TO Sir Humphry Dayv
that the gas might be useful in promot.
ing poetic inspiration. and he accord
ingly tried writing verse while under
Its influence. but the recorded result
hardly shows close connection be
tween the divine ailiatuS and nitrous
oxide. Davy'S experiments had the eff
feet of making the inhalation OF
laughing gas for a time highly fash
ionable. so that in 1902 a French writer
alludeS to IL rs having become ma
uonal vice In England Golden Penny.
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23

Some man. unknown 10 the writer
hereof. has given 10 the world saying
that sticks. Talk 10 your cow as you
would To lady" There is a world
OF common sense in il. There IL more;
there is good sound religion In it,
What else is il but the language OF the
Bible applied 10 animals "A soft an
swer turneth away wrath" y pleasant
word TO horse in time OF trouble has
prevented many a disaster where the
horse has learned that pleasant words
mean 4 guarantee that danger from
punishment IS not imminent
one morning = big. muscular groom
said 10 his employer: Il can't exercise
that horse any more. He Will bolt and
run AT anything he sees" The owner,
a small man and Ill at the time. asked
that the horse be hooked up. Step
ping into the carriage be drove a cOu-
pie Of miles and then asked the groom
10 station along the road such objects
as the horse was afraid Of This was
done. and the horse was driven 10y
them quietly. back and forth. with
loose lines Slapping on his back. The
whole secret was in voice that iuSpir-
ed confidence. The man had been
frightened at everything lie saw that
he supposed the horse would fear. The
fear went To the horse like an electric
message. Then came a punishin- pull
Of the lines. with jerking and the whip.
Talk 10 your horse as 20 your sweet
heart.-Buffalo Horse World.
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23

Perfect confidence is desirable be
tween couples engaged to be married,
but II is not always that the young
woman has as fine an opportunity to
establish il as did a Norristown belle,
20 whom Il wealthy young bachelor
had been paying asSiduous attention.
After worrying her a good deal about
how many young men had been in love
with her and how many she had been
attached 10, he asked her TO marry
him. adding:
Now, let there be perfect confidence
between us. Keep nothing concealed
from me-"
Certainly" replied the giddy girl,
''let US have no concealments," and,
jumping mp. she Snatched the wig he
wore from his head and danced around
the room with il.
In spite Of this levity. the couple
married and. from all accounts are liv-
Ing happily. more particularly SO. by
means OF using crude petroleum nice
little crop OF soft brown hair is grow
ing all over the husbands head. The
man had never heard OF crude petro-
leum as a hair tonic until his wife told
him about It. so If she had not enforced
his confidence he would still be bald
Philadelphia Record.
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
On Whom Was the Jokes

A couple of ladies in Pana desired to
play n joke on the husband Of one and
got things into a pretty mess before
they got through. The husbands were
absent from home when the ladies gave
birth 10 children. twins being born 10
one and one TO the other. The single
baby was transferred TO the bed Of
the twins in order To make the father
of the twins think he was the father OF
triplets.
Then, after the joke had been allow
ed To cause CONSERVATION for time in
the mind of the supposed father OF the
triplets, the whole thing was exposed,
but the mothers were unable TO iden-
THY their children. One woman took
one and the other retained two. but
neither is certain she has the right
ones. Mysteries and other evidences
or excitement are In order. but the
complete identity of those children will
never be established.
The mother OF the twins will know
that she has one OF her children. but
which one? While the mother OF the
one child will never be certain that she
hasn't one OF the other woman's ba.
bies.-Taylorville Is. c. Courier
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23

81 was Spizuus web in the rose
vine" said The spider "and the little
girl was sewing patchwork on the
doorstep. Her thread knotted her
needle broke. and her eyes were full
OF tears. y can't do IT, she said. I
can't. can't"
Then her mother came and bade her
look AT me. \ow. every time spun a
nice silky thread and tried 10 faStcn il
from one branch to another the wind
blew and tV.r 10 away.
This happened many times. but at
last made one thar did not break and
fastened II close and spun other
threads to join il. Then the mother
smiled
What patient spider" she said.
THE little girl smiled. too. and took
UP her work. And when the sun went
down there was a beautiful web in the
rose vine and square OF beautiful
patchwork on the steps" - Weekly
Bouquet
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
\ Russian sleigh Ride

George Fuller vigorously describes
his first sleigh ride behind trio Of Rus.
sian tlicrs. After spending two weeks
in ST. Petersburg i'm company with the
general I'm charge Of the imperial stud
l proceeded To Krcnovoi. which is 500
miles southwest of -. Petersburg We
Were met az the railway station with
the regulation winter conveyance a
low sleigh. with three horses hitchcd
abreast. trotter in the center aul Il
runner on each side. Then commenced
the journey 10 the stud. and never
VIII forget that trip. After We were
seated I'm the sleigh and were comfort
ably wrapped up in the fur robes the
driver. who drives his team standing
upright. gave an Indian warwhoop. and
we were off.
The first jump took away my
breath. The snow flew In every dircc-
uon. and rs We whizzed around cor.
nerS the sleigh would ride ON one run
ner. and | expected every moment To
be spilled out ana have my mech bro
Ken. The driver never ceased his
whooping. and altogether a ink I
rode faster on that trip than ever did
before in my life. When finally land
ed M the Stud. more dead than alive. |
said. No more Russian sleigh rides fol
Uncle George. "-Breeder'S Gazette.
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23

The late Dwight l.. Moody was fond
of telling how his picture once did duty
FOR that OF Rutherford Il. HAYES. Dur
ing the Hayes campaign a big Rcpub-
hcan rally was held in Fort Wayne.
Ind. Everything was ready when it
was suggested that the meeting would
be incomplete without picture OF
General Hayes. This brought out the
discovery that, although around the
walls of the room were hung the pie
lures OF many celebrities of the day.
that of Hayes was not among them
nor could picture of him be found.
one of the members of the committee
on arrangements was Joe Brimmer. n
sign painter. who had natural gift Of
drawing. In copy of Harper's Maga-
zine on the table was n small cut OF
Evangelist ID. l.. Moody. Brimmer de-
cided ii was enough like Hayes to
make copy from. and in half an hour
he had good sized sketch and labeled
the product Rutherford b. Hayes"
Ii was hung on the stage. and the
speakers OF the evening pointed TO il as
they referred to "that statesman" etc.
Finally the joke leaked out in the
crowd and almost resulted i'm Breaking
up the mcetiI, ,g.-New Yotk Tribune.
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
Building "a Fire.

To kindle any fire small sticks should
be laid across each other. basket fash
ion, with paper below. See that the
drafts and dampers are all open. the
upper front check closed. and apply
the match before n bit OF coal is put
upon the wood When il has begun to
burn well, put on one shOvelful. allow
ing the air To pass through unchecked
so as to kindle that. In a short time
more may be added. then more, and
when the coal begins TO glow red shut
one draft. then another.
Turn out of doors the first person
who dares 10 dream OF using kerosene
to help start a fire. and severely ad-
monish her who persists in hIling the
hrebOx 10 the top Of stove or range.
That is the way to burn out or crack
the stove and destroy the iirebrick.
Besides. II chokes the draft, causing
less heat TO be given out. A hot fire
is a clear fire. with the draft coming
unchecked through the bottom damper.
The persons who boil their tea are the
same that ill the range as full as 1t
will hold. and when IL fails. as It
then must. TO give out the needed heat.
take of the cover and punch and poke
IL down from above, thus crOwding
the coal into still more compact
mass. Such a cook has her range
speedily filled with clinkcrs and
wastes much fuel-Good Housekeep-
ing
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
Dangers OF nIuminntins Gas.

Numerous accidents occur annually
In the use OF gas foe lighting. cooking
or heating through either careleSSneSs
or ignorance. The largest number OF
accidents probably occur from ignorant
persons either blowing out the gas OF
turning il off and subsequently, turning
the cock on sufficiently for the gas to
escape unnoticed
Many other accidents are the result
OF the bad practice of turning down a
gas flame. particularly i'm a bedroom.
This is always i'll advised. for such a
turned down flame may he either blown
out by draft Of air from an open win
dow. or else il may be eXtinguished bv
n sudden variation or reduction i'm the
pressure. When This happens i'm a
small bedroom without ventilation.
there is great danger of aSphyxiation.
particularly So if water gas is used.
Much can he done To avert this danger
by proper arrangement of the gas
piping i'm houses.
Another dangerous custom is To shut
OF the gas at the main service or nj
the gas meter during the night. and
numerous accidents. some of them IA
tai. have resulted from il. II is almost
equally bad 10 turn off the gas at the
meter during the Gay.-CasSier'S
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
Very CnnsnIinr.

a somewhat NeAatiOuS law in China
compels every doctor after dark To
hang mp in front Of his house as many
lighted lamps as he has sent patients
into the next world. one evening a
European. who was staying in Peking
on business. set out in search of a doc
tor for his wife. who had been sudden
ly taken i'll. He called n the house OF
a good many. but was deferred at the
large number of lamps exhibited be-
fore each. Al length. after tramping
about FOR several hours. he came TO the
house Of doctor where only three
lamps shed melancholy light over the
entrance. Our happy European dashed
into the house of this excellent man.
awoke him and took him off 10 his
lodgings
Il presume you are the best practi-
toner in this city?" he said To his com
panion as they went along.
What makes you think SOP
Because YOU have only three Ian
terms hung over your door. while all
your colleagues have dozens displayed
on their house fronts"
''Ah. is that the reaSOnY" calmly re-
piled the Celestial. The fact is only
lately set up in practice and have
had but three patients."-New Haven
Union.
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
He Was "Ruther Crowded.

Can you give me n room for the
night?" inquired n travel stained pill
grim as he halted at 10 by 10 cabin in
Georgia county.
''Doggone it. stranger. we uns hain't
got but one room in our shack. but
light. stranger. light an bide whenst |
run in an palaver with the ole CONAN. $"
In few seconds "mine host ap
peared at the door.
powerfully sorry. stranger. but we
pns can't find you uns overnight Ole
CONAN lows eZ how we uns air goin
FER heV cOmp'ny. an we uns air g0in ter
be ruther up stump fer room ole
CONAN an granny air occerpyin the
fireplace corner. Lindy an the twins
hcZ the next. Bob. Pete an leetlc Jake
use the other. an If Lie an his family
show up ! reckon I'll hev ter give NV
corner NJ ter them. MOught gin We n
shakcdown In the middle Of the door.
but I'd hcV ter turn my seven best
coon doSS out i'm the clearin if did
that Itighj sorry. stranger. hut Won
see We CnS air gOin ter be ruther
crowded tonight" Los Angeles Her,
aid
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
Can Cats SsvImf
TN Nnts ~svImf
"tan cats swimI'' was asked OF a,
oil Il fisherman

'tan cats swimY'' was asked OF an
oil fisherman.
" EE. certainly" was the reply
'and ,hdt minds me OF a eat | once
l''fi io drOw1 that swan ashore Sure
" there u;. ; have been hundreds or
thousands az people who have drowned
eats IN tn" same way. but nevertheless
this was an experience OF my own.
Ne had cat that we wanted To get
rid OF. aud as humane way as any TO
Kill IL was by drowning So put a
couple of bricks IN the bottom Of an
old grain sack and put i'm the cat and
tied the BAG mp carefully and securely
and walked down to the end OF a
wharf. ami stood there. and swung the
bag with the cat and the bricks in IL
round like "A sling until could give IL a
good momentum. and then let il 20. and
siung ii out 10 fall and sink i'm the
water ! shoJ-d say 20 feet away.
Il supposed. of course. that that was
the last Of the cat, but the next morn
ing the first thing saw when | went
out of the house was the cat sitting oD
the veranda.
Il suppose the bag had weak spot
in ii somewhere The bricks were
heavy and sharp cornered. and swing
ing the bag round that way started II
more. and the cat was desperate. and
with the bag that way II scratched and
tore its way out and got 10 the wharf
and clawrd its way up and came
ashore
Can a cat swim? Why. surer'-
New York Sun
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
Clever CLAW.

When Henry Clay was stumping
Kentucky for reelection. at one OF his
mass meetings an old hunter Of wide
political influence said:
"Wel. Harry. I've always been for
you. but because OF that vote" which
he named-"1'm goin ag'in you"
Let me see your rifle" said Clay.
1t was handed up to him. lis she a
good rifle?"
Eyes"
"Did she ever miss fire?"
''Well. yes. once"
'Why didn't you throw her away?"
The old hunter thought moment
and then said. Harry. I'll try you
ag'In.'
And Harry was elected.-San Fran
disco Argonaut
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
UuNyeIcOmC Sustor

"Well. Miss Grace. time was. time
Is. but time shall be no more"
Miss Grace-Why. Mr.. Stacy. hope
you don't intend to remain till the clock
runs down. It's an eight day time
picce-.Jewclers' Weekly
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23

Conductor Chastilyl-IIow old is that
child?
Young Mother dndignantlyl-Do |
look old enough to have child old
enough so pay fare?-Ncw York
Weekly
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
FOR SALE.

ELHHI ACRES OF LAND, situated in
northern part of county. one mile from da'
pot, store and postoffice. Five-room dwell
ing; stable, dairy, meat-house, hen-house
ana s large cistern; , acres i'm timber. Price
c"". Vpply to d. c. SNYDER
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
THE CLARKE COURIER.
JOHN o. DROWN.
EnIroR AND PRoPRrEroR

THE CLARKE COURIER is publishe ed
weekly at ONE DOLLAR AND FIFrY CENTS
PAID IN ADVANCE, when not paid in advance
two dollars will be invariably charged.
ADVEKrIsENENTs will be inserted AZ the rate
OF One Dollars and Fifty Cents per square
Nen hnesl Tor three Insertions, and Fifty
Cents per square for each additional nser-
ton Advertisements inserted by the half
year or year at less rates.
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
NOTICE.

,;o me Undersigned, having procured an auc.
uoneer's license for the Comfy of CiarIo
uoes very respectfully solicit share of thc
ka.ronage of the county, promising satisfac-
1 slon or Will accept no pay Call on or adj
'oress me at Berryville, Va.
Yours to serve,
j. NJ. LUPTON
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23
BUTCHER SHOP

and will keep ON hand fun line of choice
fresh meats such aS Beef Veal Nuft.n
Lamb, Pork. Sausage and Pudding i'm sea
son Everything Will be kept i'm tirst-cla>s
city lyle. am here for business and will
treat You right. deliver meat to all parts
OF the town, and all orders left with me Will
receive prompt attention. Come o. see me
ana be convinced that | am the right mau
IN the right place. Nou will find me IN
Russell Building ON Corner OF Main Il
church Streets. TERMS CASH
will also keep Flour. Corn Meal. and
Green groceries, Yours 10 please
febS C. H. RONWEII A~t
Clarke courier. [volume] (Berryville, Va.) 1869-1997, 1900-05-23

Is over and peace has been declared and at
the urgent request of many friends &. Il
hONNELl. has returned 90 his old home in
berryVille, Va. where ne has opened up a
firSt-claSS