The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1900-01-31
The Honeymoon,

| sand a year?' asked Regis. scornfully
What you haven't got" returned Clar-
| issa, with brevity.
This was true-and unpleasant. They
both laughed. Regis laughed less than
| Clarissa. His frock coat did not admit
! Of undue pressure.
There was one great charm about this
| inconsequent couple. They invariably saw
| the points of each others Jokes, even
when nobody else did. This their fami-
| lies naturally considered q sign of tai
| ent. Unfortunately for them it was not
marketable
Somebody once said Of Clarissa to Reg
| gle that they were marrying on a sense
of hurnor. Reggie admitted that he rec
ognized the humor, but not the sensel
1t was 3 O'Clock in the afternoon. At
D. m. their train left Waterloo. so
| sad for Waterloo to be left" as Reggie
| remarked parenthetically. Contrary to
recognized custom, Clarissa had helped
! Reggie to pack, ''in order" as She rather
| unkindly remarked, that he might not
| lose anything. He had a habit Of losing
| things, especially his temper"
Both Reggie and Clarissa were modern.
| They had objects in life. IReggie's OBJ
| ject in life was to surprise himself But
this was high air, and he never achiev-
ed it. Generally speaking, he only shock
! ed people. He was a younger son in an
unoriginal line regiment of the type which
| the Afridis were lately engaged in deci-
mating.
| Clarissa's object was to make name in
| art. In one sense she was an artist-that
| is to say, she shared in common with the
| generality of the species an inability to
| dispose of her wares. She did insignificant
designs in black and white. Reggie called
! her designing woman. She said that
[ hn haH Cd Nv, ~rt-f,,r
| him.
Somebody once asked Reggie, in Clar-
! issa's presence-it was an awkward ques-
| tion-what she worked for. Reggie rose
| to the occasion.
For my edifcation,'' he replied
| The honeymoon started with an alter
/ cation. Clarissa called it a difference of
| opinion. As they were spending their
| honeymoon in the wilds of Dorsetshire,
where they could get rooms, out OF the
| season, at 16s week, Clarissa, as she
naturally explained, wanted no clothes"
She accordingly merely took dress bas-
ket, a cabin trunk, a hoid-all two hat
boxes, a dressing bag, and an American
! trunk. Reggie had portmanteau and a
| tin case. He sent the best man off with
these-and his best girl-to distract at
tention.
The cabby looked obviously at the re-
| mainder of the luggage. why not try
Pickford's?" he suggested.
Clarissa grew pink with indignation.
1T is precisely the same amount that
I took with me to Somersetshire last
month";" she said, with dignity.
Reggie looked sympathetic
THAT was a month ago, dear girl" he
said Its had time to grow since then"
Ciarissa and Reggie did not intend to
give themselves away. They went off
in old boots and gloves and paid the
cabby his exact fare. At the station they
yawned in each others faces, after the
manner of such as travel with their 1e-
Ultimate belongings. Reggie addressed his
wife as dear" and she carried her own
papers and rug with an air of ostenta-
tious domestic martyrdom.
It happened that a somewhat large
crowd was gathered round their carriage
window on the eve Of their departure.
The train was on the point of starting,
when a man was seen running hurriedy
across the platform in the direction of
their carriage. Everybody turned. Sick
with apprehension, Reggie recognized him
and wildly waved him back.
1t was too late. The light of revenge
burned in one bleary eye. It was the
cabman.
In his hand he held a white satin Slip
per. He threw it into the carriage.
BEG pardon, sir, for interruption, but
this belongs to YOU he said. Il found
it on the roof cs the keb. One OF the
weddin' party throwed it,
1t was Reggie himself who gave them
away in Dorsetshire. The nearest sta
ton to Slumberworth is Mool AS the
train slackened speed on entering the
station, Reggie, who had been indulging
in an interlude of purely commonplace,
leaned out of the window to accost a
porter.
"Here-you!' he called. Get out Miss
Summerway's luggageI'
Clarissa tried her hand-and Reggies
temporal housekeeping. In drawing her
forte was line; but domesticity was not
in her line, Notwithstanding.
To add to her difficulties the butcher
from Mool-which was five miles off
only visited Slumberworth once a week
Reggie endured timed meat and boiled
eggs for three days, and then rebelled.
At o'clock In the afternoon Clarissa
decided to drive clone into Mool and buy
some meat 1t would be pleasant sur
prise for Reggie on his return from Hay
mouth, to which he had gone for the
day to meet a friend We have already
implied that they were an original cou-
ole.
She bought some pounds-several pounds
of beefsteak, sufficient to ration star
wing company. At the evening meal 1t
appeared-that is to say, as much Of it
as their landlord felt entitled to spare
them.
Clarissa watched anxiously as Reggie
raised his knife. my favorite steak!'
he said, well pleased After a few min
utes she began to hum a song. When
she had finished three verses she looked
troubled. Reggie was still carving.
Hang it, it's tough" he said at length.
after succession OF futile efforts 10 d.
vide their portions. He was wretchedly
hungry
That's just what asked the landlady
to do, dear" Clarissa answered. timidly.
when l gave it TO her today at o'cock
I told her to be sure to hang il welll"
One action of Clarissa's nearly brought
disaster in its train. 1t was Reggie's
fault, as she said explaining afterward,
for not telling her. She had views. and
her action was the result or them. She
informed Reggie that il was only right
10 encourage local enterprise. she felt
that II was her duty to deal at the village
grocer's II might possibly be more ex-
pensive than sending direct 10 the stores,
but the Slumberwortk people we're rice
and. anyway, even If they did lose a little.
they could always put it down as charity
Reggie erinned. but said nothing when
he heard her gravely order quarter OF a
pound Of best loaf sugar q few minutes
afterward
When It appeared-four minute Jumps
and a bill for half pernv-he shrieked
with uncomfortable laughter. But Car
issa did not laugh She went upstairs
For the first time in her happy. care
less youth she weot bitter tears She