The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-03-23
NORTHEASTERN
: PENNSYLVANIA

(NOlLvANlA
of about 12o miles. A ride over the
route would be a treat of a lifetime.
JUST BETWEEN US.
BE wise!
Concise.
Have sense
Condense.
Thrice told
Gets DID,"
Be brief.
Relief;
And then,
Amen!
We provide our happiness; other
people provide our pleasure.
The man who invests In shad may
have his moneys worth in the meat,
but he's stuck with the bones.
The weigh of the transgressor should
be heavy, for he's frequently half shot.
Many people seem to believe that the
devils business cards come in packs
of fifty-two, exclusive of the Joker.
1t never pays to run through a brier
patch.
Somebody says that the best way 20
get rid of the blues is to try to push
the clouds away from other peoples
windows.
Sweet spring will soon employ the pens
OF poets in her praise
And they. in common with the hens,
Will give the world their lays.
MATTERS AND THINGS.
Nt,. n
Herman took place and was largely
attended this morning from st. Johns
Catholic church, when requiem high
mass was celebrated. The interment
was made in Laurel Hill cemetery.
Waseca Council Daughters of Poca-
hontas will on Saturday evening pay
Winguretta Council, of Binghamton. a
fraternal visitation. An adoption and
banquet is included in the programme.
1t is expected that the Erie shop men
will on Tuesday next be paid for SER
vices in the month of February.
Susquehanna has a return visitation
from the Monte Carlo Girls, March
Goth.
Politicians are already trotting the
country roads. seeking Democratic
nominations. They don't ask much.
Itutc duNlCtS lIOIll nun. idIuSIld a.
Grow are to the effect that he is on the
high road to recovery. And all our
people rejoice.
One morning recently, when couple,
who had registered as man and wife,
came down to breakfast at hotel, ono
of the first remarks of the Mrs" was
to ask her alleged husband if he used
sugar in his coffee. 1t was very in
nocent inquiry, yet it led to much
speculation.
certain Sunday school teacher told
her class Of young ladies last Sunday
that it was 'the Christian duty Of ev-
cry husband to buy new Easter bon
net for his wife" And yet people speak
shudderingly of anarchists and their
teachings
GREAT BEND-NOT HEAVEN.
A LanesbOro man recently slid out Of
the house and went to a crOssroad
dance. leaving his wife, who also want
ed to go. at home. She sat down and
penned note. in which she bade her
husband goodbye forever, and to meet
her in heaven. She then packed her
satchel and departed. a few days ago
the husband learned that in her trip
to heaven she had been sde-tracked in
Great Bend, and he went after her. In
consideration of a new gown, and a
promise to take her to the next dance
she consented to return to his hearth
stone and try him once more.
IN A FEW LINES.
There were few divorces, but hun
dreds of marriages in Susquehanna
county last year.
There is movement on foot to have
a State Normal school in this section.
The bankruptcy business in Susque-
hanna county appears to be looming
up. Tho industry is evidently in
healthful condition. LET the good
work go on"
The winter of 1S99-19OO will long be
remembered for it's great number of
successful religious revivals in Susque-
hanna county. And the world is grow.
ing better.
Honesdale editors are throwing ad-
jectives at each other. How good and
how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell
together in unity"
Rev. Mr.. Sheldon's alleged news
paper is arriving in Susquehanna, as
per contract. AS a newspaper. it is an
unabridged and lamentable failure.
Whitney.