The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1900-03-15
TROUBLES OF THE DRUGGIST
CURIOUS NAMES PEOPLE APPLY
TO HIS MIXTURES.
Manages to Guess What Is Desired in
Most Cases, But is Kept Thinking
at Times.
New York NAH and Expressl


What is it you want, my little
MANI" inquired the druggist of the boy
at the counter.
Me muddsr wants 3 cents bitter
Alice" suffered the urchin, unload
ing the coin from his mouth.
The druggist went into the myster-
ious place behind and presently came
back with an article which he wrapped
IN paper As the lad went out of the
door the druggist turned TO his three
wondering friends at the counter
What did that boy ask for?" in
quired one of them
Well, he asked for bitter Alice" re-
Piled the druggist. Il don't keep BIT
ter Alice in stock. so I gave him bitter
aloes. That's what his mother sent him
for. 1 imagine"
There was a laugh. and one of the
three inquired:
DO you have many curious mistakes
like that2"
They are legion" was the reply of
the compounder of drugs. Il used to
think that some of them were quite
laughable, but really 1 have become
more or less Indifferent. A man takes
great chances now and then filing
some of the horse or
ders that are presented, but the ma
Jorlty are easy. Last night a servant
girl from the Heights came in here and
asked me to give her something to
take mans breath away. 1 gave her
cardamon seed, which she evidently
recognized, for she sampled them on
the spot. l have had any number OF
cans for Paddy Garrick,' and even
patty garlc and penny garlic which,
OF course, produced paregoric in each
case. Here is a written order for a
bottle of the smelling stuff thar goes -
your Drain. This. of course, meant
ammonia have had a call for nigh
sClrrups, when hive strip was really
required Gum arabic seems to mix
theIn up great deal, for the demands
tOr, lt nave resolved themselves into
gum mare back 'comea "a bacl- {,
gaImar1back, hanback, and come
earback'
You see" continued the druggist
HHushg mat his listeners were highly
Interested in his statements "a great
many residents of This neiya, f,,, ,,
are OF most ordinary means and. in ad-
oLIioh, nave not superior education
All are anxious to save physicians
charges, and think that a druggist is
hully competent TO treat their ailments
with success. Some of their DIAGNOSIS
OF cases are really pen pictures Here
Is q request fer something for an old
woman, who has bad cough and can
not cough. Then I find a graphic APP
peal tor plaster for d man kilt with
stHches That is not quite as notable
on epic as the one which calls for
enough hackSeed to make q Duddjne,
for sore toe 1t was a little mora ex7
pressive than the order which asked for
soInetnlng for heavy pain in the
bones that IS coming out through thu
eyes we nave here a rather amazing
request for 'enuf eppy cack to throw
up a baby 4 years old This youpesfer
must have been in pretty bad shape. for
mere ! nave a demand from its mother
that l furnished her with something
LOT ner o-year-old child, who has an
mp. essslon on ms heart and a cough
that Is choking him in the neck
To fill the next order NAV seem diff
cuit'k but II really isn't. 1t states. Send
me some OF the essence you put people
10 Sieep with when you cut their fin
gers on. 1t evidently mearft ether. At
all events, that is what il was filled
with The man who wrote this order
wanted something to take tobacco ont
OF my mouth. l suppose it was the
scent OF the thing that he objected to
Ine good housewife who wrote to me
requesting something to rub nv old
man With got d liniment. of course
1t must have been her twin sister WIZ.
wrote for something to knock A cold
Out OF an old man Another peculiar
demand Is for enough arfse seed TO
take the twist out of q dose Of SIENNA
These odd orders that I might read
until daylight. Send me a babv's TON
TO z nurse bottle meant, no doubt a
nursing bottle top, and something for
a sore baby's eye is not easy to mis-
take have also appeals for remedies
Tot sweiled woman's foot and a
man with a dry spit on him.
The phonetic sounding is. however
the most odd feature of the whole bust
ness Cardamon seed I have had de-
scrloed as 'colored man seed and Nc
GORDON seeds Orders for unguentun1
nave been couched in requests for
money quintom.' Annie Quintonn' and
Anne Grintuna.' Orders for bug mint
ana 'barnegef have filed with bersa-
mot, and TO man who asked me for
campfire l gave camphor. Arrowroot
IS frequently written air root and on
one occasion I had a written request
for 'raving bold Sam when Abraham
oaISam was intended. Some of the other
mistakes that have noticed in the Iagt
ten years at this stand have been Gu
pld' FOR 'cubeb, glory farm for chloro-
form. OK sled acid for oxalic acid .rord
worm for laudanun, paint killer for
pain killer, 'stirrup Of swilP for sirup
OF squifis, gross Of supplements for
corrosive sublimate and Mary attic
acid for muriatic acid.
But I do not mind all these. II IS
the woman who wants cents worth
OF cologne to smell a trunk and the
CHAP who asks for a mixture Of two
Thirds alcohol and two-thirds castor
on unat puzzle the average druggist
They are what We call blind writer's
but we manage to guess what they
want 1t keeps US thinking at times.
though"