The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1900-01-20
DELAYED THE WEBBING TOUR.
on the Night of His Mar.
rage.

There were q whole lot of sensational
features at a recent swell wedding on
the West side, which, for obvious rea-
sons, never got into the society columns
of the papers. They are too good to re-
main in ~obscurity, however, and are
here related, the names, of course, be-
ing fictitious.
Hawkins was the groom, and the bride
was the only daughter of a wealthy
family, who are fervent members Of
the Methodist church. After the cere-
mony a reception was held at the house,
the departure of the young couple on
their wedding tour being set for 1880
o'clock. About $3.50 o'clock Hawkins
stole away from the house to a saloon
about a block away.
AS it happened, two of his ~acquaint-
ances, who had not a very high opin-
ion of him. and had a grudge to satisfy,
were in the saloon. They noticed Haw-
kins' full-dress suit, and he, in an un.
wonted burst of generosity, asked them
to take something
"Give US a small bottle of cham
pdSHc Sdlu ndWk1nS.
why all these togs?" asked one of
the men.
Been getting married." responded
Hawkins. "The old folks are teeto-
%talers, and it was pretty dry around
at the house, so I just slipped'out to get
a bracer. You know 1 seldom drink
anything, but I feel pretty nervous to-
night"
The two acquaintance congratulated
Hawkins, and in honor of the wedding
insisted on buying another bottle of
wine, which was followed by another.
By the time the third bottle had disap-
peared, Hawkins insisted on a fourth,
and when that had been disposed of he
was decidedly overcome. 1t was then
10:3O o'clock.
"Better go home, Hawkins" said one
OF his companions.
Hawkins wept at the suggestion.
"Goin' SHAY in here" he announced.
'Giv's mother botT'."
The bottle was duly finished, after
which Hawkins sat down in a chair and
went to sleep. The other two men,
who were pretty gay by this time, be-
gan to undress the unconscious bride
groom. They took off his collar and
white tie. then his shirt and undershirt,
after which they replaced his vest and
coat. Then they removed his shoes
and stockings. after which they put his
shoes on. Last of all. they BACKED
Hawkins face and then they reused him
from his sleep.
Come on. Hawkins. We'll walk around
to the house with you" they said. and
almost carrying the staggering Haw-
kins they sailed out, one on each side of
him.
When they reached the house there
was a scene. The bride was standing
On the steps, almost distracted, and her
parents had blood in their eyes. The
wretched Hawkins was oblivious to
everything, however, and had to be car
ried upstairs and put to bed, while the
bride had a fit of Mysteries and her
mother snapped out: 81 todd you
you'd regret this. 1 never was satisfied
with the match"
AS inc cohSpiidtoI lclt NILS
room after putting him to bed, the
mother-in-law stopped them and asked
how he had got into such a ~disgraceful
condition. They professed entire ig-
norance.
1--WE were coming along Madison
street." they explained, when we saw
him sitting on the curbstone, with a
lot of boys tormenting him. We drove
the boys away, and after finding out his
name and address brought him home.
BE is an entire stranger to u.s."
How Hawkins squared himself is not
known, but he did eventually, and the
wedding tour began W days later
than the date set for it. 1t is believed
that the t%eetotal principles of his wife's
parents have been adopted by him, as
be has not been known to take a drink
since that night.-Chicago Inter Ocean.