The Washington weekly post. (Washington, D.C.) 1878-1916, 1900-10-09
DER GERMAN coBsles.
a Reporter Gives Him q Psinter and Lets
Of Trsable.

Heeeffef Gives Him a Pointer ana Lets
Of TrsabIe.
One time / don't haf cents worth Of
work In der shop und belief ] vhas
bankrupt man. yher a young man comes
in ind like me 10 fix Oop his heel he
vhas reporter by some newspaper. he
says. ind vhea he sees / haf no work he
Says 10 me:
-Cobbler, you Was q man who don't
catch on. II yhas ash easy ash grease II
you know how. In one week bring 30
peoples 10 els shop"
How can you did liz says.
"Yhsll. you listen 20 me. / shall say
in my paper Tomorrow dot your uncle
IL Shermany, who yhas a baron. has died
uad left you $50, 0s9 Eaferbody who
reads II win want TO look at you. Eater
body who comes Will bring shoes TO cob
bic. You shall haf so much work dot you
can't go TO bed nights. do dot vhay one
time for a secondhand clothier. und he
vhas a rich mans In one year. Ha! but
we shall fool der public ind make some
Vanderbilts OF you"
I dunno II it vhas all right, but dot re-
porter talks und talks und goes AWAY.
ind next day he puts me In der paper.
He says: From der poorhouse TO der
palace. A Sherman echbier, who WAS
almost starving, comes into big fortune.
His JOY vhas so great dot he almost
hangs himself. He Will at cnce buy a
steam yacht ind a $4,000 diamond pin.
Call al his shop ind see him" IL vhas
sooeh a nice article dot laugh all oafer
ind my wife sheds tears. In two hours
Young man nit his hat on his ear comes
in und says:
''vhell. cobbler. hooray for you. BY
sheorge. but dot vhas some good luck!
You can pay me dot fife dollars now"
"Vhat fife dollarsP"
"vhy, dot FIVE dollars I lend you last
Christmas to buy some toy mules for
your baby"
II nefTer borrow fife dollars OF you"
"Oh. hoi So YOU WAS a blk, ell? Nhen
| you get some money you go back on your
friends? Now let me tell you dot you
must come down nit dot five or l shall
knock you into some cooked hats! Shell
| out,''
don't shell out. und belief he breaks
| me in two II a policemans don't come
along und scare him AWAY. In ten MIN
utes an old man comes in. He has ten
| shildren und vhas my best customer. In
one week he brings me s. worth OF work
"Vhell. eobbler" he says II hat read Of
you in der papers ind vhas glad. / sup
pose you Will now live In some brown
stone fronts und hat a swelled earriage?
YES. l likt 10 do dot" I says.
"Und / like to speak to you about our
schurch. We vhas going to make repairs.
ind row dot you vhas a rich mans, you
yhill gif $500"
But can't did IT," l says.
mo? You mean dot you don't like 10
gif up some money to der Lord after
your good luck. You can buy steam
yachts und diamonds und race horses,
but you can't help der schurch. Well.
sir, you vhas a villain at heart, and l
| vhas sorry l ever bring you work. Good
day. sir. und may dot steam yachts ex-
plode nit your
My wife cries when dot man goes AWAY,
| ind I feels weak in der knees. but an
other feller comes IN. He vhas full OF
peesness. He hat book Vnd pencil, und
he says:
Hello, cobbler! So you hat struck luck
at last? All right-all right / like you TO
put down so for der hot air fund for poor
shildren."
But how can do dot?" | says.
What! Do you mean to tell me dot you
can't spare $40 out of $50 go! BY Sheorge,
but you vhas a sink of a man If you
don't did it! Dis vhas no SMOKES. Winter
vhas only three months AWAY, und we
like to get dot hot air ready. Hand over
und quit fooling."
/ couldn't did it. of course, ind he calls
me ten bad names und kicks oafer der
water pail. l trembles all oafer when he
vhas gone und my wife says We shall be
in two poorhouses before Sunday. l al
most half some tears in my eyes when a
womans comes in. She vhas old und lame
und poor. She takes me by der hand ind
says;
"Cobbler. rejoice nit you. You vhas
good man, und / vhas glad of your luck.
May der Lord open your heart TO help me
get a new wooden leg. You can easily
spare me $25g'
But I can't did it," says.
Then make 1t si5."
81 can't make IL feefteen cents"
do you mean 10 say you won't help me
get some new teeth?"
81 can't did it,
What! What! Der Lord brings you
| s25O,O00 in a lump, und yet you won't gif
| dollar TO help Aunt Sally buy a new
wooden leg ind some teeth! You don't
mean dot you vhas sooeh a villain as
dot?
My dear womans. / can't spare no
| money-not cent"
Den you vhas some unhung villain. und
| ghill see dot no respectable peoples
speak nit youi Villaini Miseri Base
Hart May heaven deal nit your
Dot vhas awful. but before / can shed
some tears a policemans comes In. He
| smiles und laughs und winks und says:
"Vhell. Dutchy, you haf struck IL rich,
und / congratulates you. BY Sheorge, but