Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1900-01-27
HE SOLVED THE PROBLEM

This young mans grievance was towels.
He liked his rooms. His 1andlady was
motherly and induigent. He didn't want to
move. He'd had the rooms for eight years.
Everything was all right except the
towels. Rather, the lack of towels The
young man had fought and battled for
towels for eight long, weary years, to no
avail. Sometimes he'd find one wberewith
to complete his morning ablutions, and
sometimes he wouldn't. Then he'd have
to open bis door and below to the maid
down in the basement to fetch him
towel He rarely noticed the absence Of the
towel until he had performed his matutinal
ablutions, and then, after believing for
the maid to fetch him towel, he'd have
to stand dripping like a cypress in
paper, until the mai8 decided in her own
mind that he was entitled to a towel and
brought lit. Often the maid would be in
the act Of scramb.ing eggs or making
buckwneat cakes when the below for the
towel penetrated the basement; on such
occasions she'd let the young man below
until he was hoarse, and at that he'd get
no towel. Whereupon he'd be compelled
to dry his face and hands on the cretonne
porteres Only the man who's experienced
the thing is capable of telling the misery
| involved in the use of cretonne portieres
towels.
The young man spent eight years in COM
planning to his landlady about the absence
of towels in his room. For day or SO
two towels on the rack. and he'd revel in
the joy of it. Then the same old towel
would be suffered to remain on the rack
for three or four days at a stretch, until
the young man would tie it in a knot and
fling it on the floor, thus to indicate to the
maid that he'd got all of the good out OF
that particular towel that could possibly
be hoped for. Maybe there'd be fresh
towel the rack the next morning, ana
maybe there wouldn't 1t was all a lottery.
The young man got into the habit of bet
ting with himself as to whether he'd find
clean towel on the rack when he reached
his room on returning from his office
Things came this afflicted young mans
way a couple of weeks ago. A suite con-
sisting of pair of pleasant rooms had
been vacant in the house for some time.
The rotherly landlady tackled the young
man in the hall about the matter one
evening. when he got in from the office.
Cant you get some nice young man
one as quiet and easy to get along with as
you are, you know-to take those nice
rooms?' she asked him.
The young man put on an expression or
great solemnity.
II know a chap that's hunting for rooms
good friend of mine-got plenty of money,
and would pay a good figure-does any
thing 1 suggest to him
Here the young man halted suddenly and
shook his head.
"well?" said the landlady.
1OuI TOUiHS uu just suit iliih " q
said the young man. Precisely what he's
looking for. I'd like to be able to recon-
mend the house to him."
The young man paused again and looked
really grieved.
''Well?" said the landlady.
unfortunately, l can't recommend 1t,
said the young man, sadly.
Cant recommend my house?" said the
landady, exctedly. "Why, Mr.. Cinchyjob,
what do you mean? Haven't you found"
Unfortunately" interrupted the young
man.. with a look of gloomy resignation on
his face, Il can't recommend the house.
I'd like to, but I really can't, you know. i
know all OF my friends little traits. He's
not cranky OF old-maidish at all, but he's
one of these perpetually scrubbing chaps,
and if there's one thing that he insists upon
it's plenty of towels in his rooms. One Of
the most reasonable fellows ] know, too,
my friend is, but that's his hobby-plenty
of towels; slathers of towels. in fact. So,
of course, You see how out Of the question
it would be for me to recommend the rooms
here TO him. don't want to sacrifice his
friendship If I'd recommend the rooms,
and he found out, as he would inside of two
days, about the way the towel game is run
here he'd be liable to look upon a
sort of confidence man. Pm really sorry.
Mrs. Getcoin, but you wouldn't want to
have me looked upon bunco man by
my friend, would your
The landiady's face was a study as the
young, man., .xhaling deep sigh, assembled
the stairs to his rooms.
Say" said the young man, in telling
about it. ~ ought to We seen the towels
when 1 got home from the office the next
evening. 1 could hardly open the door to
get in for em. Towels everywhere. Rack
| loaded down with EN- All kinds O. towels
Turkish. grass linen, blue bordered, pink
bordered, fringed. cut-on-the-bas towels.
| towels Uttered with applique work, en-
broidered towels, towels a la empire, Louis
| Quinze towels, gored-and-flared towels and
! just Observation-Disclosures saw SO many of
'em in my life. They were piled up on top
| of my bed and the mantelpiece and the
| chiffonler, ana when l opened the bureau
| drawers found my duds had been dug out
| Of 'em to make room for more towels. If
use two or three of 'em day from now
| on until Decoration day 1 won't be able to
| work off that stock of towels"
| We'll, did you tell your friend about the
rooms?" the young man was asked.
| 'Huh?" he inquired. "Oh, looked around
| for couple of days until 1 found a fellow
| in the department who wanted to change
| his roost, and he's going to take the rooms
/ on the LIST of the month";