The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1900-12-14

er to go to dance?'
HE suggested that possibly / might
learn to love him. said the spinster.
Yes, of course" returned her dearest
friend. "Doubtless he realizes the truth
of the saying that One is never too old
to learn ''-Modern Society.
I.ottie B., a G-year-old, is Il pupil in
one of the Columbus schools. This is the
first term she ever attended and the
daily programme has interested her
greatly. When she came home one even
ing after she had been going week her
mother asked:
Nov. Lottie, you have been going to
school whole week; what do you most
like at school?'
Lottie puckercd her eyebrows thought
fully an instant and then replied decisive
We'll, first like recess most. an
after that l like to march."-Ohio State
journal.
He-''Do you understand the language
Of flowers, dear?" She-"Oh. yes; lit
tle." DO you know what those dozen
roses l sent you last night mean. love?'
.Why. yes; about $2.75, dear.'-Ionkers
Statesman.
The Nell Gwynne hat in London is one
Of the notable things of their dramatic
season, but there is also a hat in New
Iork-tWo hats, for that matter-Whlcli
cannot be forgotten. The first is worn
by Ida Conquest, III Richard Carvel,'
and causes gasp when it first appears.
The brim is something enormous, and IS
faced with all exquisite shade OF pink
velvet which sets off we'll the dark cur!y
wig Miss Conquest wears. The outer
brim is hunters green velvet, with Il very
large bunch of ostrich plumes in the same
shade. The tips of some of these feath-
ers come over onto the under brim Of
The other hat? Well, it scarcely be-
longs in this category, but it is worn by
De Wolf Hopper in the burlesque Of
"Arzona," and he has to take it off be-
fore he can pass through the door.
Husband-'I can't get the casters un-
der the bookcase to work at all, and I've
oiled them twice.
Wife with conscious superiOrity)--"Bu
you didn't use castor-oil. "-Tit-Bi
''Come down and have dinner with me
this evening" was the invitation of the
COlOradan to his friend from Harlem
who called on him at the Imperial re-
Gently.
Cant do it, old fellow was the re-
ply. Sorry, but I have, an engagement
>'That's all rights was the response.
Fetch him along; there's always room
for three at my table if the third ones
"They say Grace is a Methodist"
"No; she's a Shaker
How do you know?'
"She shook me off!!'-Exchange.
Bertha +. a small Columbus maid,
spent the past summer months in the
country. One day she and her mother
were walking, when Bertha, running
ahead, discovered something in the road
which she had never seen before. AS she
ran back to summon her mamma she
cried out shril]y:
Hurry, mamma, an see wot I've
found!'
What is it, Bertha?" asked the moth
why, mamma" replied Bertha, ''its
muffin with a tail to it,
Little Bertha's ''nothin with a tail to
it, proved to be very small snake wig
Cling it's way across the road.-Ohio
State Journal.
n'ld !soO ttsheu Tic 10 marry nlm
Ella-"And did you consent?'
''Why, yes
Then accept my congratulations,
Mrs.
Mrs? Why, not till June!'
,a ~9h; thGugh't you said you were mar
And then Eta had to buy the soda.
Tr1r of
ing case recently he was disturbed by a
young man who kept moving about in the
rear of the room, lifting chairs and look
ing under things.
Young man." Judge Gary called out,
''you are making a great deal of unneces-
sary noise. What are you aboutY'
Your honor" replied the young man,
to find it,
SWELL" said the venerable jurist, "peo-
pie often lose whole suits in here with
out making all that disturbance '-Phila-
delpha Times.
:'Speaking of singing,'' exclaimed the
nightingale sneeringly, "of what earthly
use are you? You couldn't touch high
note in a thousand years."
"Oh! l don't know" replied the bird
of paradise. I'm likely to be embalmed
a $50 note look like 80 cents."- Catholic
Standard and Times.
In dull Scottish village on dull
morning one neighbor called upon anoth-
err. He was met at the door by his
friends wife, and the conversation went
thus, writes Ian Maclaren. "Cauld ?'-
"Ay." ''Gaen to be weety, I think. -
''Ay:" rs John inY'-"Oh, ay, he's in.''
"Can I see him ?"-"No."
But wanted to see him. "-"Ay, but
you Gamma see him. Johns deid"
"Deid ?'-''Ay."
'Sudden pay"
Every sudden: '-"Very sudden
''Did he say onything about pot of
green paint before he deid?'
She-"The man I marry must have
done something of Importance"
He-"Then I'm the very man you re-
Quire.''
She-"You? Why, what important
| thing did you ever do?''
He-"I fell in love with you at first
sight!''-Der Floh.
Some friends Of Archbishop Whately,
= flor dininp with him asked him tO show