The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1900-08-02
2, ~ ". " =. -. 81. ~. ., s,,..,,e y. y,
ExileS in a Far Land
~ 5yS S1S| ~ 7;ssS ~ '@aS 7V5S a

~ two young persons. man and wife,
LIVING comfortably in Washington. de-
cidsd about TWO months ago that Wash
inStOn wss no; Of sufficient size for
them. Likewise, they mutually con-
cluGed that Washington was slow.
Furthermore, il struck them both az
one and the same time that there didn't
seem 20 De anything doing" in Wash
irstor, and the male person Of the
couple referred 70 the capital ot the
nation SIS q burg Of no speed whatso-
ever worth mentioning and alluded 20
it in caust.c terms as being all right
in i:s way. but Sleepy Hollow ST that
in sIl OF which the wife OF his BOSOM
coinciisd with him.
All Of which said the male person
ot the couple. naturally leads Up to"
New York. OF course" replied the
wife OF his bosom.
WhsrsupOr, after pstronicirs their
Washington friends whole lot, in
deed. and telling tEeir Washington
friends that they were sorry 20 leave
them behind IN 8 poky old place that
didn't know it WAS alive like Washing
ton. and declaring in loud and specific
terus, subject 70 no uiscOnstruction
Whatsoever. that New York would be
good enough for them FOR the remain
der ot their natural lives. they depart
ej for New York. As they sped out ot
the station On the train they rsvilei
Washington unto sach other and rs-
marked cha; Washington wouldn't 10,
and ths, they were ticklsd almost fool
ish 81 the prospect Ot arriving within
6 matter Of five hours Or 50 q, point
where they would have every oppor-
tuniIy 70 get run FOR their money.
Arrived in New York, this pair Of
Wsshingtouiaus. man and wife, hest
t4;eG not 70 express themselves as be-
ing ieliriorsly happy.
~Lt's the only town, amt it, said
the male person. bsaning upon the
wife Of his bosom
The only towu.~ she echoed.
Look ST this blaze ot lights" said
the male person. pointing his cane at
ihe bulb-eLsctric sign over the Broad
way pusiists' saloons and the Broad
way rsstaurateurs' pcite-robbery ss-
ezbishrs1ts; don't see blaze OF lights
Ike this down in H,tIe CID Washing
,or- DO you2 Real thing, Iris, isr', il ?
Plenty q action here, Isn't there"
-Oh. lots replied the wife OF his
o-1sou-
~Great 10 be IN the rnsddinS crowd.
orcs 2-ain- isn't itT' he went on.
/ pointing out the sursins thrun-s q
beautifully dressed buuco s-ssrsrs and
I other promoters rushing htchsr and
I yCu in their anxiety 70 nail good
things in advance Of each other.
'-Do-', see people Like this in the little
old place down there, do yOu7-
No she replied with - much COZ
v5eri11. Is it were, th&s be had 70 look
AZ her closely 10 see IL she were really
( enjoying herself
Clever bunch. aren't chsye~ said
[ the Is-< person Of the couple whsz
they took their first table t'h 'ho-s dinner
/ at the Blue Dog restaurant pointing out
( the dishsvel%d artists. the gay and glad
some shoe clerks. the ladies with -rsl,
/ sorrOWs and futures behind them mot
10 speak Of their Prisuacbc hair and
/ their iEs-aGicab-s Ip-sIigcsJ, the
/ iuag agiua5ivs and imaginary writers,
who toll not. neither DO they spin; the
pale vsrsiGs-s with T. ChIrJsr-ou
Z -Its-ups, against WHOM ito hear the
I T. Chltserr0Esl al publishers ire
lsAEu<J In one vast, cruel -cus uspirGcys
the ~aGsu.s5~ ghysici1us, whose p-ac-
sice consists in the writing Ct Lo-'
brusyi.cie vaportugs for the New Icr1
sunday safzrUus. ard M tk-rest - the
marry, u1irthiuL piur-es-Zi1tlH 1s--red-
, iEk-cu-sh s-siis ~BohsuiLrs" (1Crrured
word. Free. E0wiu-. uucouvt1tiC-Al
natures they have, haven't tkeyt They
put away the petty restraints Of civil
Gati0r IS il the restraints were not,
vuu perceive. Childish. bland. briIIiLr Z
lot. hcy3 Do1t see folks like them
Down iE the little Old place on the
PetouIc, 10 youP"
NO replied the wife II his bosom
with an accent SO clear ard Ggstfu,.5
ssGt he had TO look at her again in
1risr 10 ascertain IL possible IL she
we're really entering into the i.'ylLl,