The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1900-06-08
SMART SHORT STORIES.


Ex-Gov. George w. Peck. of WILSON,
sin, author of ''Peck's Bad Boy" was
running little country weekly In the
plnerles in the early sixties. It was an
un1mportant sheet save for one column
or Jokes which Peck wrote each week.
This department caught the eye of
Brick Pomeroy, who was then print
Ing his Democrat in La Crosse, Wis, and
one day he wrote to Peck, asking him
whether he would he willing to go down
TO La Crosse and work for the Demo-
crat at SIS a week. Three days later Mr.
fomeroy got this telegram: Il accept
your offer quicker than instantly. For
heavens sake don't withdraw ftp
"a 80
In recent letter. from the front, Lieut..
Winston Churchill tells this amusing
story OF Gen. Hart, whose personal reck-
lessress has been one of the features OF
Gen. Buffers campaign. On the first
Ray at Spion Kop Gen. Hart discovered
a soldier sitting safely behind a rock
and a long way behind the firing line.
Good afternoon, my man." he said In
his most nervous, apologize voice; what
are you doing. here?" Sir" replied the
soldier, ''an officer told me to stop here,
sir ooh, why?" I'm th1rd-class
shot, sir" Dear me-" said the general,
after some reflection, that's an awful
Pity, because you see you'll have to get
Quite close to the Beers to do any good.
Come along with me and I'll find you
nice place" and a mournful procession
trailed off toward the most advanced
skirmishers.
Not long ago Sir William Vernon Har-
court dined on an English man-ef-war,
and a storm coming up, the captain,
who was very small man, persuaded
him to occupy his state room for the
night The steward was not notified OF
the arrangement, and the following
morning at o'clock he brought cup
of coffee to the captains door. Knock
ing twice without receiving a reply was
most unusual, so he hastily pushed open
the door and inquired: Don't you wish
your coffee this morning, sir?" Sir Will
fam gave a snore and the steward was
amazed to see a huge figure turn over
under the bed clothes. Smash Went the
cup and saucer, and the frightened sal
lor tore off to the surgeons office. For
heavens sake, SIR he gasped; come to
the captain! He's speeches. and sWol-
len to ten times his natural size!
Lately, at the opening of a free library
at Acton, Eng, Hon. Joseph H. Choate,
the American ambassador to Great Brit
ain, delivered an address, and caused
much laughter by his impromptu refer
enees to a baby who persisted in dis
tracing the attention of the audience
by making its voice heard at the most
inconvenient moments. The first inter
ruption occurred early in the speech.
Mr. Choate was saying: There is a spe-
ciai provision for children In your library,
and [ think when men come to make
choice of residence in Acton they will not
forget that fact" Here the baby scream
ed in such a manner as to drown the
words of the[speaker. There was some
disturbance, but Mr.. Choate said: Don't
be disturbed by the baby. Nobody knows
better than my lord bishop that out of
the mouths of babes and stockings com
eth wisdom" Things went fairly well
after this, the baby appearing to be fiat
tered by the reference, until Mr.. Choate
was saying: There IS a book with
which all OF you--" Here the baby
walled loudly. Except, POSSIBLY, the
baby-are familiar. the ambassador
went on; sit is 'EccIesiastes,' and 1t says
that of the making of books there is no
end"