St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1900-06-16
PATIENTS WHO ARE sTMGY.
People who Need the Oaees ef Ply
sicians Sorely D0t Object
to the Fees.

Probably few patients have carried
parsimony to the height. pursued by
= certain baronet, Sir William Smyth,
who, although immensely rich, was
never happier than when trying to
evade doctors bills. For instance,
says the New York Herald, he once
made . bargain with a-great oculist
to couch both his eyes, agreeing to pay
60 guineas if his sight was at all re-
stored to him. Ths operation was
made and proved SO successful that he
was enabled TO read without glasses.
No sooner. however, was this state
of affairs reached, than the miserly
baronet began to grieve at the thought
of paying the promised zee. and he
therefore pretended that he could see
nothing distinctly, and, to sustain the
pretense, he submitted to wearing the
bandages for some weeks over the
usual period. When the time expired
he still contended that he had only
the faintest glimmering of light, with
the result that the badgered physician
compromised the business by accept
ing 20 guineas instead of 60.
Cases of this kind are by no means
rare in the experience of medical prac-
titioners. A doctor attended patient
for influenza of a rather bad type, and
when the cure was completed sent in
his bill at the ordinary rates. Itwas,
however, returned to him with note
from his late patient limiting that, as
the influenza was at the time in the
nature of an epidemic. and the doctor
had doubtless reaped considerable
benefit from it, he ought to make a
considerable reduction in his bill in
view thereof. However, the physician
did not fall in with this eccentric and
stingy proposition, and eventually the
bill was paid as it stood, though not
without many more protests from the
payer.
= Another patient, who prided himself
on his medical knowledge, was in the
habit of making suggestions to the
doctor who attended him during ill
ness, which suggestions the doctor
would sometimes good naturedly
adopt, more for the sake Of gratifying
the patient than for any other reason.
Judge of the medico's astonishment,
however. when the amateur Hippo
crates actually refused to pay more
than half the bill on the grounds that
at least $50 per cent. of the cure had
been due to his unaided suggestions
In the treatment" nrtft
Audacity and penuriousness could
hardly, have gone further than this,
and under the circumstances it is not
surprising that the physician not only
insisted on full payment, but refused
to. attend the gentleman further.
Specialists can tell many tales ot
parsimony in the people who consult
them. An eminent lung physician once
received visit from q Sussex farmer
whose trouble proved to be merely
imaginary, and whose mind was soon
at rest. On his departure he offered
the specialist five shillings, and on the
latter pointing out that his fee was
two guineas. the worthy agriculturist
scratched his head and said that he
considered such a sum far too much
for "telling a man he had nothing the
matter with him. Sfsi
Another gentleman Of similar ten
denotes, who consulted an ear special
ist, was thunder stricken when asked
for fee Of one guinea, as he averred
that scarcely three minutes had been
consumed in. the consultation. The
doctor pointed out that it had taken
him over 30 years to obtain the ex-
perience which condensed consulta-
ton into three minutes. but the obsti-
nate consultant refused to take this
view, and eventually prevailed upon
the physician to accept half the sum
named. 1t may be added that this
parsimonious person was in receipt Of
an income that ran into many thou
sands per annum.