Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1900-02-17
THE NAVY ON THE STAGE

United States sailormen, commissioned
and enlisted, enjoyed themselves vastly in
attending a naval play, with a naval
title, that was given at one of the local
theaters last week. Some of them Went
two or three times, just to be Jared. The
bluejackets were all over the house at
every performance, and the commissioned
officers Of the navy grinned in each others
faces night after night over the hilarious
revelations made to them during the pro-
gress Of the naval play as to the way
things are run on shipboard. Now, 1t is a
singular fact that while there have been
several excellent army plays. there never
has been a naval play that didn't border
on the ridiculous. One well-known play
wright caught the spirit of the regular
army OF the United States admirably in his
army play. He spent several months at
remote army post studying garrison ana
campaigning life, and the result was that
men in the army or men who had been in
the army could not pick flaw in the play
when 1t was produced. But every affair
that has pretended to be a naval play has
been simply funny in its lack of under
standing of the simplest matters in con-
necuon with the man-of-war. II the play
Wr1ghts who purpose writing a naval play
Wouio spend ten days or so around a navy
yard they lldn't possibly be guilty OF the
absufditles that inevitably characterize all
affairs OF this sort up to date. This par
ticular ''navar' play might have, and prob
ably did, satisfy it's auditors who knew
nothing of life in the navy, but 1t surely
was something fiercely funny as viewed
from the standpoint OF the sailor, commas
stoned or enlisted.
For example, the villain was a naval sur
geon 1t appears that he had previously
been dismissed the service in disgrace, after
being court-martialed for refusing to at
tend a sick sailor on board snip down IN
Brazilian waters. Yet he calmly, and with
the usual villains sneering leer, walks over
the starboard gangway of the United states
cruiser New York and reports for duty as
surgeon of that ship. The officer Of the
deck who knows the chap and his record,
demands to know what he is doing aboard
the vessel. The villainous surgeon reaches
into his pocket and produces his commits
sion, just as if it were the most ordinary
thing in life for commissions to be reissued
to officers once "bobtailed'' from the ser
vice. The officer Of the deck asks him how
he contrtved to break into the navy again,
and the villain brags that his pull in
Washington did the job for him.
This is only one Of one hundred similar
incongruities in the piece. The messenger
of the officer of the deck Is chief petty
officer in the play. 1t Is generally sup
posed in the navy that only apprentice
boys perform messenger service Tor the
officer of the deck. The chief master-at-
arms in the play appears to be pretty
high muck-a-muck in the American navy.
All Of the bluejackets, who are singing and
dancing under the togallant fo'csle, i'm
neuldSely KNOCK OH tnelr run anu StdHu 10
attention when the master-at-arms comes
around in the play. Any Jimmy Legs, as
the chief master-at-arms is known in the
navy, who is able to get an enlisted man
to stand to attention for him, must indeed
be what is called hot member" A legs
Is an enlisted man, and enlisted men don't
rate salutes or standing to attention-not
in Uncle Samuels navy. The easy spirit
of camaraderie that exists between the Of
ficers and enlisted men of the U. S. s.
New York is charming to contemplate. only
1t suggests to men in the service, or men
who have been in the snrvice, that man
o-War run that way, with the men for
ward on chummy terms with the officers
aft, would stand a grand chance to run
on the rocks or turn turtle some time or
other. The heroine of the piece climbs
over the side of the New York to see the
hero, the chief gunner's mate. The chief
gunners mate Of a man-of-war is an en-
listed bucko, and not many chief gunner's
mates have beautiful young society women
running after them on board ship. One of
the officers mildly suggests to the young
woman that there is a broad gulf between
comm ssioned and enlisted men in the
United States navy. She takes advantage
OF the occasion to say, haughtily. that there
shouldn't be any gulf, then-so there, nowi
that we're Gall free and equal, etc, ETC.
How Capt Rebley Evans, who was in one
OF the boxes Son the first night, did enjoy
that bit! He shook all over. And Gen
Miles, who also attended the first night
performance, had d grand time listening to
this young womans revolutionary exposi-
ton as TO the relationship that ought to
exist between the commissioned and the
enlisted men
But the great scene of the piece takes
place in the fire room. One of the boilers
has sprung aleak while the U. S. S. New
York is under full steam. The officer of
the deck visits the chief gunner's mate,
who is in irons in the brig for striking
superior officer, and asks him to be right
nice and show his innate nobility by going
into the boiler and patching up the leak.
OF course the chief gunner's mattel do
just that thing. He's turned loose and
deck hands to help him in his hazardous
undertaking. Now, on board modern men
of-war the black gang make up pretty
important part of the crew. They are the
men who attend to the propelling Of the
ship. Besides the commissioned engineers
there are machinists, water tenders, oilers,
firemen galore and coal beavers by the
score. They're all practical men around
the higher rated ones, such as machinists,
are experts. Besides, there's a regular
boiiermaker In every man-o-war black
gang. However. the boilermaker wouldn't
do to fix the boiler in this naval play. Re-
course had to be had to a deck hand. and
prisoner at that. the chief gunner's mate.
and a chief gunner's mate generally knows
as much about boilers as he knows about
the works Of Browning. The firemen and
coalheavers and oilers and the rest of the
chaps in the black gang didn't appear to be
available to help the chief gunner's mate
out in his boiler-patching work. Lands
men and seamen gunners and quartermas-
tiers from the deck had to be delegated.
An old tar, with water-tender's rating
badge on his port arm, came out between
the acts after the boiler-patching scene
and he looked around in daZed sort of
way.
Say, wouldn't that make you think O.
galley cookin?'' he inquired.
Making Good Use of Her Pass.
Correspondence of the Chicago Record.
One of the islands in Panama bay used
to belong to an enterprising old woman
from Connecticut, the widow of a sea cap