West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1900-11-15
POssUM PARTY
POLITICS.
Brotker Gardner Makes a Great
Campaign Speech and Settles
vexing Question.
Tells Ills Party Followers not 60 Flop
In Case the Other man il Elected.
Gil the possum
party was organized
by the Limekiln club


X ..1.. monty. ss q. ,sa , ..s a. s club
eral idea was that Brother Gardner
would be named as candidate for
the Presidency on a strictly colored
mans ticket, the old man has had
little to say in public and refused
TO commit himself to any issue.
The announcement that he would
speak on Saturday evening brought
OUT such a tremendous crowd that
instead of trying to pack the people
IN Paradise hall platform was
erected and an open-air meeting
held on Watermelon square. No
sooner had the distinguished repre-
sentative of the colored race of
America appeared on the platform
than enthusiasm boiled over and
the audience went wild. Brother
Gardner was flanked on the right
by the highly honorable Cantelope
Hastings, the Demosthenes of Vir-
ginia, and on the left by the most
excellent June-berry Tompkins, the
persimmon poet of Alabama. The
trio were greeted by cries of
brother Gardner, our next Presi-
dent J" "Give us our rights =,
"Let our Moses take the lead 4"
etc. When he could make himself
heard, the Limekiln President made
his bow and began
"Black Men of America A
long time ago few of us got to-
gcther in Paradise hall to discuss de
political situashun. We wasn't
conspirin' .ag'in de guv'ment, an
we wasn't lookin' to kick up no
rebellion ag'in law an order, but
we wasn't zactly satisfied wild de
way things was pannin' out for de
black man. We couldn't make out
dat he was hevin' a fair show.
(Cries of "No, no !") So fur as
we can make out all de white folks
was inside de watermelon patch an
all de black folks on the outside.
Gigantic applause.) We made up
our minds to cut loose from de
white man an go it alone.
(Whoops.) We dun 'reckoned dat
we could at least skeer him into
maxim far divide of de offices.
(More whoops.) Didn't seem
right fur de GUILD man to carry
most of de torches, do most Of de
yellin' an a good sheer of de votin'
and git nothin fur his pains. (Yells
of protest.)
''Dar seems to hev bin sort of
understanding all along dat / was to
be your candidate fur dc Presidency.
("Yes, yes l") l has nebber said
would refuse. l has simply bin
layin' low an watchin' things. [
am yere tonight to say to yo' dat |
cannot accept de honor yo' would
bestow. (Yells, whoops and gen.
eral confusion lasting fully five
minutes
"My fr'en's," resumed Brother
Gardner when order had been re-
stored, "we has got to look dis
matter squar' in de face. We
reckoned on maxim de white man
afraid of us, but ives got left. Do
yo' know what he did when he read
of dis Postum party an what we in
tended to do De Republican
party went at it an dun bought up
all de watermillyun crap in de
United States. Dey didn't leave
but one single millyon. [Groans
of indignation and despair. Den
de Democratic party went at it an
took an option on all vans an per-
simmons in de kentry an marked
down cherry possum in de hull souf.
Terrible groans. Den dc Re-
publican party took another step.
1t passed law ag'in cake walks
widout S25 license, an dc Demo
Gratis follered by buyin' up all de
camp meetin' grounds in Norf
Americy. Intense agitation. De
odder day when sent representa-
tive to Washington to see Misser
Mckinley bout our Postum party
he jess smiled as he said
"'Yo' tell Brudder Gardner dat
If he don't bust up dat Possum
party widin a week not Guild man
in dis kcntry will get another water
millyon or hear of a cake walk =
"Den sent a representative to
Misser Bryan, an dat Misser Bryan
he wasn't Bit skeered. He pound
cd on de table wild his fist and
shouted
"'Yo' 90 back home, sab, an
tell Brudder Gardner. dat he can't
bluff me II he don't shet up,
yo'II do without vans. persimmnns