Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1900-03-01
Aren't Men Ungrateful

p
sc6ooimate of his, whom he hadn't
seen or heard Of for years, up to his
house for lunch.
Monday, it Is not necessary TO remind
our gentle readers. is wash day In. all
well-regulated households.
Mr.. Jobson hadn't been home for
lunch, except on Sundays and holidays.
for years. OF course, it just Happened
that out of the seven days in the week
Mr.. Jobson could have lighted on none
other so suitable for bringing an old
boyhood chum mp to his home for
luncheon as on Monday-wash day.
Men don't know anything about the
dreariness of wash day, anyhow. They
see the ironed linen stacked up on the
bed on Thursday evening, say, and they
vaguely wonder how 1t was done and
where it came from and who did 1t, and
30 on. If rainy weather or some other
interpretation OF providence prevents Its
being stacked up on the bed on Thurs
day evening, and the boss OF the house
happens to be out Of handkerchiefs, he
gazes witheringly at the wife OF his
bosom, accuses her Of spending all her
time at the bargain counters to the
total neglect Of her household duties,
and in general gives vent to torrid
flow Of masculine unreason. That's the
.xtent of the male knowledge of linen
cleansing.
Mr.. Jobson happened to have for
ten his latch key when he went to the
Office on Monday morning, and so when
be brought along his old school pal
to his house he rang the door bell. The
servant being busy in the basement
handling the washing, Mrs. Jobson,
thinking that the bell ringer was prob
ably a rug peddler or book agent or
some such parsonage, answered the
ring herself. Mrs. Jobson had been as
sisting the servant with the linen: She
was in an out-at-elbows red eiderdown
wrapper, with the sleeves rolled way
up, and her hair was done up tightly
in kids. Her nose was shiny from the
steam of wash day. When she saw
Mr.. Jobson and his swell-looking COM
panion, she simply bolted up the front
stairs for it, Mr.. Jobson exuding mer-
nv. II somewhat hard sounding, laugh
as she went
"Ah, caught you in house neglige,
did we, my dear?" he called up the
stairs after her in rollicking, oh-how-
naughty-naughty tone voice, that yet
had a certain metallic ring in Mrs. job
sons ears.
'Tli be down in justa minute, called
Mrs. Jobson over the banisters, and
then Mr.. Jobson and his oldschoolchum
went into the parlor. Mrs. Jobson
hastily dug out the powder chamois and
touched up Der face, put on presentable
garments, removed the kids from hel
hair and set 1t right, and then she made
her appearance in the parlor.
my dear, you've often heard me
speak of Tommy Swiftboy, my ole
schoolmate, haven't your" said MIR. Job
son, formally presenting his friend t(
his wife. Remember my telling yo'
how we played booky once for three
weeks at a stretch and hid our book
under a sidewalk every day. Well
here's the self-same hooky. player
blew in on me at my Office this morn
ing, and, although wouldn't say !
10 his face, I'm just tickled to death t
see him. Brought him up to see wha
a nice little plant I've got-his dad use
= TO saw that we'd both of us land Il
;. states prison before we came OF ag'
u And here am, a settled-down old fogy
s and he's got wife and three chi
dren-got their pictures In his watch
= at his home in New York. wanted
!. drag him off to restaurant for BIT
ii 10 eat, but he wouldn't hear OF IL
wanted to look me over under my ow
- vine and fig tree, he said, and he hate
1. restaurant or hotel cookery. Cant "
e. have lust q little bite of luncheon, m
J. dear?"
g Mr.. Jobson gazed at Mrs. Jobse
amiably, but with mseting OF the ey
: brows that said, Us plain as day: al
y II wants to be an almighty neat lunc
con, at that!"
- Mrs. Jobson's heart sank as s.
eli thought Of the remains Of Sundays tu
ID KEY in the refrigerator, and nothil
;" else. The steamy fragrance OF t
wash-day suds that permeated I
w house caught Mr.. Jobson's nostrils o.
me he shifted wonderingly and with
81 manifestations of enthusiasm ove;' u
Nothing elaborate, my dear, =
- know" said Mr.. Jobson, with scar
ing look at Mrs. Jobson. "Just wi
-. you've got in the ice chest, you knt
ne Mr.. Swiftboy is a domestic man, q
he understands that we may have TAI
you unprepared."
lze- Mr.. Jobson's glances at Mrs. Jobs
use said as plainly as If the words W
written on placard hanging aror
his neck: "You just want 10 see v
a that there's a top-notch lunch on
at table In Just is minutes, or there'll
81" some echoes around here later on
Mrs. Jobson, after moments
sultory conversation, excused hers
. cs- ran down the basement steps, place
lion hat on the colored woman's head
sent her out by the alley gate a
,eli, luncheon food. It was mostly OF
un- delicatessen and canned variety. In
was some sliced tongue and ham,
- ted ham, canned salmon, hurriedly-e
Va structed potato salad, the remains
H. Sundays turkey, raspberry jam
coffee and tea on the table when, a,
= a frenzied scurrying around, Mrs.
NV Az A. liz coz NTH fresh mar