Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1900-04-06
A CANDIDATE FOR THE LEGISLATURE.
He Comes Out Early in the Hope of
Silencing Opposition.

SiIencing Opposition.
To the Voters of Allegheny, Bath and
Highland:
Believing as we do in the old pro-
verb or maxim, that the early bird
the worm. Notwithstanding the
fact that the early worm is the fellow
that is often caught, we have con
to offer our services as your
representative after our present mem
ber's term shall have expired. That is
if there is anything left to represent.
Now in order to give our fellow cit
liens time to consider our views, we
shall at this early date proceed to
build the platform upon which we pro
pose to stand. Then should that worm
we speak Of turn and sting the heel of
some one you will have no one to blame
but yourselves. MOI can you accuse
us Of broken promises. First Of all
we shall rot spend our time in looking
after such little things as appropria-
tions to lunatic and deaf and dumb
asylums, or the election of judges or
United States Senators, and SO Cd,
but shall leave those immaterial MAJ
tiers to the more common, ordinary
members of the house. But our bust
ness shall be to look out for and attend
to the interests of any Yankee land
grabber that lnay take a fancy to any
farm or farms belonging to any one
or of our constituents. and it
shall be no fault of ours If he don't
get them. Now we wish all to under
stand that we are no bride taker, but
any little mite that he may of his own
free will hand over, instead of rammin2
it down in our own selfish pocket, we
| will just hold it in trust for Mr.. Rookie
Teller, or some other such Teller, until
such time as they may stand in need
OF it, reserving the right, however, to
judge as to when that time shall be.
mo we can't be bought
We Furthermore promise to sacredly
guard all needy corporations in their
right. aud should any Oificious mem-
Der. outside of our domain offer q bill
looking to the protection of, or for the
benefit of any laboring man or class Of
labOring men, whom we shall have
the honor to represent, it shall have
our everlasting condemnation. Nor
shall our voice ever be heard in it's de-
fence, but instead shall just keep our
seat like a knot on a log with our
tongue cleaving to the roof Of our
mouth. But you can bet your bottom
dollar that when it comes to a vote,
that it will be recorded against it fret,
last and all the time. Now the bill
that passed the last session, separating
the sheep from the goats should by all
means be repealed, for that is a mat
ter left to a higher power, for those OF
us that will be fortunate enough to
get to the better world will have to
ride in the same triumphal car. Then
! why not get used to them here? Be.
sides we are opposed to placing such {
responsibility on the poor conductor
( for it is almost as difficult some time
TO tell a sheep from a goat as it is tt
tell Il gold Democrat from a Republi
' can. We promise, too, that if we eve
( vote for g measure that we are asham
ed of afterward. that instead of trying
to get some one else to cover it up, VI
+ will just let her go gallego and sa.
nothing about il.
Now my fellow. citizens, to these thing
and these alone will we give Jul undi
vided attention. And if we can brinI
them to a successful issue, We shal
feel that our duties have been faith
fully performed.
n And when We return to cur home W
shall confidently expect to hear til
s welcome of we'll done good and faith
n full servant, and to hear such expires
sions as these: oh, you are a daisy an
n so on. With these declarations befor,
you my countrymen we stand, eithe
n to live or ole, SINK or swim, survive o
perish. But when the sun shall sinl
behind the western hills on the frs
Tuesday of November, 1901, we hop
to be able to subscribe o%urself, you
representative.
You may think it strange Mr.. Ed
! tor that we send u card outside o
Z our Legislative district for publication
1 but the truth of the matter is just this
Every newspaper man within it
bounds are either candidates them
selves or have k1nfo]ks who are, ant
L say they are not willing to furnish
! club to knock out their own brains b,
advertising us.
Very respectfully,
CONFEDERATE.