The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-02-05

I'VE are now entering upon the Sec
ond and last bitter cold period of the
present winter Elias Hartz' goose
bone says so, and Mr.. Hartz' goose
bone never lies" says the Stroudsburg
Times.
with unfailing accuracy, Mr.. Hartz
has told the weather for nigh on to
sixty years. Severe winters and open
winters he has picked out long before
the ides Of November; and SO great is
the faith of many of his fellow towns
men In his prowess as weather prog
nosticator that all their plans hedge
around the oracle's measured words
about the wintry season.
"Only once have his predictions fall
en- short, and then through no fault
of the venerable prophet. Last fall
he prepared and gave out his usual
bulletin, but when the winter came
the severe weather set all his predic-
tions at naught.
"Mr. Hartz was chagrlned and his
fellow tOwnsmen shocked. In all his
sixty years among them as prognos-
ticator, when forecastings had greater
value than the weather bulletins sent
out from Washington, he had never led
the farmers astray. nor varied a hairs
breadth in his predictions for the
weather which followed. 1t was only
natural. therefore, that he should feel
downcast. Was his power deserting
him? Had the goose bone lost it's
potency?
TWAS THE WRONG BONE.
Joy came with the morrow, for In
seeking to read the bone again Mr..
Hartz discovered that some wag had
given him, not the bone of a goose. but
one of a gander! Hence the error into
which he had fallen. for a gander bone
speaks not the truth. neither about the
weather nor anything else. And
straightaway securing the bone of a
goose, Mr. Hartz re-read the fates;
and 10! the fine weather as he said IT
would be.
His lost prestige returned, his old
time power was restored. and once
again his word about the weather was
as law. Indeed, the slip-up only served
to strengthen the potency Of the goose
bone and enhance the authority of Mr..
Hartz among his fellows. So that now
when he says we are entering in the
second and last cold period of the win
ter. there is none in this section Of the
state who will say him nay.
"It is plainly indicated by the goose
bone said Mr.. Hartz. Il predict that
we will have cold and changeable
weather from this time on until some
time in March. The weather, accord
ing to my calculations, during all of
February will be cold. with very slight
changes. 1t will cover a much wider
area than the preceding cold snap.
The coloring Of the bone shows that the
weather will be severe for a time, when
it is likely to slowly become milder,
but 1t will continue cold much longer
than the previous freeze-up The
spring will be a late one. l predict
| much sickness.
ICE MEN NEED NOT WORRY.
1.-The ice men need not worry.
Haven't / come to you in previous sea-
| of blizzards. storms. and all kinds of
| sons and told you weeks in advance
| of bliZzards, storms and all kinds Of
| weather. and haven't they come true?
/ foretold the tie-up on the railroads
several winters ago. and warned them
| from what the goose bone told me-
Take my word for ii. we'll have all the
winter we want. The goose bone says
Wen have cold weather, as / have al
ready told you, and that settles it.
| I'll stake my reputation on it. I've not
been deceived in sixty years and that
ought to be enough to convince any
one. I've never know it to fail, except
once, when I was deceived in the char
acter of the bone
| Though he has survived the storms
of eighty-five years, Mr.. Hartz is still
| active and hearty. His faith in his
ability to forecast a winter from the
bone of a goose is sublime. His method
| Is simple.
| ITO know the weather of any particu-
lar winter he selects in the previous
fall the breast of goose born in the
spring of the same year. and he de-
clares that he has never known his
reading of the breast bone to fail In
some years the bones are covered with
black spots, and these he takes to mean
blizzards. severe snow storms or eX-
tremely cold weather.
He declares that he has never been
deceived except when that gander bone
was foisted upon him."
| CITHY TY@N