The age-herald., 1900-11-25
A DAMAGE-sUlT CONSPIRACY.

run over by street car and I will bring suit for you against the street railroad. Of course, I'll take the case on contingent fee. We'll divide whatever we get and, if I lose the case I won't charge you any thing"
 That's all very fine" said Dick 'Tt sounds like heads you win and tails I lose. .'
 'It's the only thing can think of," vert on the lawyer. You see, it won't do you any good to make me sick To begin with, know you too well to call you in to cure me- and if you should effect a cure I've got no money to pay you. No, don't see any thing to be done except for you to get run over by street car"
 At this point the telephone rang. An eb- ony waiter appeared at the door. some body wants to speak to Marse Henry" he said.
 It's a long lane that has no turning. The telephone message was to the effect that a woman was in the office and wanted to see Marse Henry This sounded promising Visions of law suits flashed through his head. Hastily selzing his hat the lawyer hurried to his office, and there awaiting him was a real bona fide client.
 The facts of the case were developed un- der a skillful cross-examination, for the woman was one of the kind whose eonver- sation, once started, was like a ship put ting to without rudder-you never could tell when or where 1t would arrive. The lawyer perceived this, and interrupt ing the long flow of words by numerous questions, he ascertaned that the wom- ans husband had been an employe of a railroad; that while loading a freight car he had been pushed out of one of the doors by a barrel which another employe had rolled into the car and which had got be- yond his control, and striking the womAn's husband had caused him to lose his balance and fall off the car His foot, the woman said, was badly injured. He had been car ried home and put to bed, and what should she do?
 Here was the long-looloed-for damage suit. The doctor would not have to break his leg after all. [,
 Marse Henry explained to the woman that she had done the wisest thing in the world by consulting him; that she need not worry her head about anything else she had to do. Just to go home and leave everything to him. He would send doctor and attend to everything.
 The woman left and the lawyer hurried round to the doctors office.
 Dick" he said, Congratulate me-Pve got case real live damage suit against a railroad-man's foot mashed,-permanent injuries earning capacity diminished-pain and suffering-the whole thing. It's lucky for you too. You go round and see the man, fix up his foot, and then send in big bill for professional services That's one of the items of damages"
 All right" said Dick. "I'll go in a min ute. Let's go by Bozano's first and drink to success"
 The two friends repaired to the familiar back room. One or two rounds of beer were drank "to Timber up the muscles" as the doctor said 'It takes a supple band to set a broken foot and drink or two makes the physician more insensible to the patients suffering and therefore more able to handle the case from a purely scientific stand point"
 Yes, I've noticed that beer has a pecu- liar effect the mind,' said Henry. ''When I get hold of knotty legal questions there is nothing that relaXes the tension of the brain like a pretZel,-I mean a beer, and two beers instead of making you see double makes you see, you see, and seeing as the poet says, is believing, and believing is-say, Doc, what is beleving?'
 The pretzels were clearly going to the lawyers head.