The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1900-11-02

name in them. and you'll lose them fast
enough. '-lndianapolis Journal
They say Miss Singleton is a trans
migrationist.' Yes. She thinks she
must once have been the wicked flea
whom no man pursueth!'-Life.
Fair Panterl hope you don't mind
my sketching in your field? Farmer
Lord, no, missile. You keep the birds
Off the peas better'n a ordinary scare
crow.-Tit-Bits
Crater must have turned over n
new leaf. lie tells me he's working.
night and day" Yes, that's the firm
he's with now" "WhatT' knight &
Day.'-Phlladelphia Press.
HoaX-I understand the doctor said
yesterday that there was very little
hope in your rich uncles case. Joax-
It's even worse to-day. He's very much
Philadelphia Record
Shocking: "They say the young man
Melissa Perkins is goin' to marry is
reg lar paragon Land sakes! DO
tell! 1 thought he was clerk in gro
cery."-Chicago Times-Ierald.
"What do you suppose makes your
baby sister cry so?' asked a visitor Of
small johnny. Il guess it must be
cause she is hatchin her teeth re-
piled the youthful observer Chicago
News.
What makes you think he is a man
of little tactT He joined a Don't
Worry Club the second day after he
was married. and didn't know enough
to keep it Il secret Chicago Times
Herald.
School Teacher What little boy can
tell me where is the home of the swal-
low? Bobby kim please School
Teacher-Well. Bobby? Bobby-The
home of the swallow is the stummick.
-Tlt-Bits.
Doctor-W What you need is change
and rest. Patient--I can't afford it,
My incomes pretty well requisltioned
already. My children get all the change,
and my wife gets the rest Philadel-
phia Press.
Georgy ton the warpath)- Say, Eddy,
did Harry hit you? Eddy-No GeOrgy
Did Jimmy hit you? Eddy-Nope.
Georgy Well. If nobody hasn't hit you
l will. I've got to Hex some one.-Chi-
cago News
All that He Asked: Miss Lulu Flan-
nigan-I will give yez my answer in a
month, Pat lle-That's right, me dar-
lint; TEX plnty av time TO think 1t over.
But tell me wan thing now-wlll it be
yes or noT'--Judge.
Old Lady pointing to elevated rail
Where do them cars go to? City
Man (hurredly) anywhere you
want. ma'am. Old Lady-Land sakesl
| thought they had to stay on the rails.
New York Weekly.
Fuddy have a deal to say
about the brotherhood of man." and
yet wars and rumors of wars continue.
Duddy-Thats all right. There always
has been more or less lighting in fam
ilies-Boston Transcript.
Tess So she's to marry the son Of the
wealthy Mr.. Millyuns. How on earth
did she manage to land him, l wonder7
Jess-She's musical. you know, and so
It's no trouble at all for her to catch an
heir.-Philadelph Press.
Proud Parent-lf you call in the even
ing you probably will hear my daugh-
ter singing. Artless Fliend-Oh. 1
shan't mind that. You ought to hear
the fellow down our way practicing on
the cornet. 1t is simply awful Boston
Transcript
My boy said the first proud papa,
"has a bad habit of interrupting me
when I'm talking. Your boy isn't old
enough for that yet" No" replied
the other. my boy contents himself
with interrupting me when I'm sleep
ing. "-Phlladelphia Press.
I'VE got up another crowd and ran
away from those people we camped
out with last year" Did they dis
cover it," Hull When we arrived
Mt the ground we found they had made
up another crowd and had run away
from us" -Indianapolis journal.
Ratios Of Travel: Mike" said Plod-
ding Pete. do you believe in dis six
teen to onef" Sometimes l do" an
swered Meandering Mike, ian some
times l don't 1t depends on whether
it's sixteen meals to one mile or six
teen miles to one meal. Washington
Star.
Mrs. Moveabout-Yes, like that
house you sent me to see. 1t will be
much cooler for the summer, but the
dining-room is only half as large as this
one. Mr. Moveabout-So much the bet
ter. 1t will only be possible for half as
many flies to get into philadelphia
Press.