Gloucester County Democrat. (Woodbury, N.J.) 1878-1932, 1900-05-03

Heavenly Twins" and it ought to be
done by the instantaneous process, for
no man can tell how soon they will be
at each others throat again. Ambi-
tious and far aspiring statesmen would
do well to ponder the history of Joseph
Benton Foraker and be wise Only
a few years ago he was more in the
public eye than any other Republican.
Everybody expected him to one day be
nominated for the presidency. Now
he meekly accepts a position as dele
gate at large to help renominate the
man who gobbled his mess of White
House porridge. General Charles Hen
ry Grosyenor is a much maIigned man.
He is accused of being implacable, and
yet now, when at the height OF his
glory, he permits Foraker to have some
honors- Foraker, who, when he was
governor, took from him vi ct armis
nice, juicy, little piece of pie-I say
vi ct armis, for I am certain that the
general would never relinquish any
piece of pie, great or small, in any
other way. Now he heaps Goals of fire
on Foraker's head by permitting him
to be one of the Big Four.
Rank of General Dick.
Another thing on which / congratu-
late General Grosvenor and Field Mar
shal Hanna is the deftness and ease
with which they promoted Hon. Charles
Dick from the comparative obscurity
of a political coloneley to the rank of
general | hail General Dick!
am always pleased to see any fellow
representative climb the ladder of
fame. Particularly am l gratified to
see Hon. Charles Dick mounting high.
One of my most agreeable recollections
is of another Mr.. Dick; not an Ohio
Republican Dick, but Mr.. Charles Dick
ems Dick | formed his delightful ac-
quaintance in the pages of David
Copperdeld" of immortal memory. He
is an old friend; he fingers with one;
he was not prominent statesman, as
is Hanna and Grosvenor's Dick In
deed his whole stock of philosophy ap-
peared to be to recommend people to
take a bath-to be washed clean-a
performance which Mr.. Charles Dick
could recommend with profit and good
conscience TO his Republican brethren
ia Ohio and, truth to tell, everywhere
else
But, while the Associated Press dis
patches make it clear that Hanna and
General Grosyenor promoted Hon.
Charles Dick, as aforesaid. by some
such formula as ''Kneel. Colonel Dick;
rise up, General Dickp they leave one
point in mystery. and that is whether
Hon. Charles Dick is Brigadier General
Dick, Major General Dick. Lieutenant
General Dick or full General Dick.
wish General Grosvenor. who is fertile
in resources. would vouehsafe US a bill
of particulars as to General Dicks ex-
act rank 1t would save trouble and
would enable a seeker after truth to
estimate somewhat approximately at
least General Dicks perquisites, for il
this day of liberal allowances" to gem
erals it truly must be that fun gener-
al or a lieutenant general or even s
major general will be more munifeent
IL 'allowanced' than a paltry briga
der; but, whatever particular species
of general Hon. Charles Dick now is,
I suggest to General Grosvenor. the
great keynoter. that he go into this
campaign with the thrilling battlecry
of "Dick and liberty forever!''
McKinley's FugIeman.
I have one poignant regret touching |
the Philadelphia convention, and that |
is that for one brief, halcyon moment
/ cannot control the divers and sundry
brass bands which will make the vel |
kin ring on that occasion If were in |
charge, just as General Grosvenor. the
real leader of the Ohio Big Four ap
peared. followed by Senator Foraker.
once fondly called Little Breeches"
by his admirers and denominated sIire
Alarm" by those who loved him not. !
would have all the bands strike up |
10, the Conquering Hero Comesr
General GrosveHor's going TO Phila |
delphia as chief fugleman is in keeping
with the eternal fitness of things. He
helped to rock the cradle of the Repub /
lican party. and no one is better en-
titled to follow its hearse. BY long and4
distinguished service in the cause of /
McKinleyism he has achieved s.the bad
eminence" of being chief mourner at
its funeral.
The Ohio platform Is as remarkable
for what 1t emits as for what 1t con
tains that Is. it would be remarkable
If it had been made by any other set
Of men on top OF ground except Ohio
Republican platform makers. ! put
In this saving statement because IL
viii be remembered that in 1896 the
Ohio Republicans put such an amaz
ing and enigmatical financial plank IN
their platform that II remains an 10
soluble marvel to this day.
This time they practically ignore the
Porto Rican tariff bin and the princi I
pie. The less said the sooner mended = /
but Il they suppose that b1 ola xlng the /