davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29
LOVES PARSIMONY.

Give me the desert,
Why do they seek for place
In the bare hearts of men,
Why in a loved ones face
Do they look again
For that which is lost,
For gain that is less than the cost?
Give me the desert.
Yes, my love is selfish,
She is splendid and fine:
But the desert is not selfish
All that it has is mine.
Give ME the desert,
Let me live on the lips OF the sand,
On the parched cheek of it, worn
With my journey from Samarcand.
There is no fear of scorn
In the smile of the waste
No last expectation misplaced.
Charles Julian
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29
THE MISSOURI MEERSCHAUM.

Some swear by light Havana leaf that's
rolled into cigars
BY swarthy Cubans' nimble hands be-
meath the southern stars;
And when they puff the fragrant weed
mayhap the curling rings
Show visions of fandangos gay and
strumming guitar strings;
l know not-but in truth know my
Lady Nicotine
For me entertainments lovelier hath, de-
lights more kind and keen;
The pipe that grows in happy fields
where l so long to be
The old Missouri meerschaum, lads,
and that's the smoke for me!
So I'll smoke my corncob pipe,
And I'll dream of apples ripe
In the orchard by the road;
Of the fields of corn / hoed
When my boyhood dreams were
born
Of the river flowing by,
And the waving woods anigh;
Oh, the far-off fields of corn!
Let dilettante clubmen smoke the
choicest weeds they choose,
And lounging on their soft dfvans dis
cuss the daily. news
The ebb and flow of market tides the
social swirl and set;
Their flavor cannot soothe the nerves,
it cannot kill regret
But l shall sit me snug and close with
humble pipe and stem
To dream of loved ones far away-Pve
not forgotten them,
Nor yet the lowly farmhouse and the
fields of corn where grows
The old Missouri meerschaum, lads,
and that's the smoke that goes!
oh, the lyric hilt of birds!
Oh, the tinkle- tinkle-tink
Of the bell that leads the herds
Through the pastures! oh, the wink
Of the daisy eyes that shine
In the meadows-all are mine;
And the kindly common folk
Beckon backward through the smoke
'1O' NV LII liz IliC SuDdL IOIi, uOi LudJ
which by brevet
OF courtesy is called a smoke-the soul
less cigarette;
If any dreams it conjures up l doubt
not they are sprawn
Of hideous bells whose lunacy and
leering idiots yawn!
| choose the graduated weed and press
it in the bowl
Of this the only pipe that hath an in
dividual soul
The Sentient soul of growing corn in
fertile fields afar;
The old Missouri meerschaum lads, it
beats the best cigar,
Oh, its visions void and guile
Oh, the simmer and the smile
Of the sunshine on the grain
Gathered in the creaking vain
Rolling BARNARD! oh, the wealth
Of the heart-ease and the health.
Oh, the jolly, holy joy
Of the memories of a boy!
-RObertus Love, in New York Sun.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29

The old-fashioned mother sometimes
hears her daughter chatter to young
men Of subjects which even now bring
a hot blush to her withered cheeks.
But she does not reprove her. Susy
has gone through college. She talks
as flippantly of Huxley and Renan as
if they had played with her in her
cradle. She has spent year without
a chaperon in Dresden studying music.
What is there that Susy does not
know? How should this poor lady ad-
wise or. correct her daughter as
mothers used to do when they stood
upon a higher plane than their chill
dren HIadies' Home Journal
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29

The greatest hotel in the world is the
Astoria, built by John Jacob AsUor on
the site OF the family homestead at
Thirty-fourth street and Fifth avenue
New York city.
A detailel description of this struc-
tural mammoth is an iupossbility
within the limits of newspaper space
and only some of the startling facts,
indicative of its vast magnitude and
splendor can be given.
Adjoining it is the famous Waldorf
owned by William Waldorf Astor,
cousin of John Jacob, and until the ad-
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29
THE INDIANS AT PARIS.

The Indian village at Paris will oc-
cupy a space Of two hundred by one
hundred feet. 1t will represent the
indian at home on his reservation.
There will be seen the wigwams Of
skin and cat-taH rushes. The squaws
will prepare the meals in the crude
utensils. They will pound the corn
in the wooden mortars and cook the
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29
PAINFUL OCCURRENCE.

Beloit, Wis, March 22.-While rela-
tives were taking a last look at the re-
mains of Georg Smith yesterday after
noon, one Of the cross sticks support
ing the coffin broke, plunging the
corpse and coffin into the grave. The
coffin was badly broken and the corpse
shockingly exposed. The deceased
was a brother-in-law of Potter Palmer
of Chicago and had been brought here
for interment
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29
CASH IN HAND.

Milwaukee, March 22.-The ultima
tum of the board of managers of the
state fair has been pronounced, and it
is that the fair will not he located at
Milwaukee and that nothing will be
done toward getting a fair at Milwau-
kee ready until the $4,000 is in hand.
The board is without funds and must
have money before it will contract or
go to any expense; there are other
cities that are willing to put up the
cash,
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29

He looked into her beautiful orbs
Qovely girls never have eyes) and said:
Darling, I love you better than life;
there is nothing in this world l would
not do for you; nothing I would not re-
frain from doing for your sake" Then
he reached over and grabbed the big
corner biscuit, leaving the little crust
less one for the idol OF his heart
Boston Transcript
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29
THE ANNUAL SENTENCE.

Society in wig and gown
Sat in the judges place:
The sternest kind of legal frown
Upon her charming face.
She sadly shook her pretty head:
On account of their wicked ways,
The World. the Flesh and the Devil, >
she said
Are sentenced for forty days"
Carolyn Wells in Puck.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29

Filipinos made a three hours attack
on Apart, north Luzon, but were re-
pulsed
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29
OUR BIGGEST HOTEL
AND FOR THAT NATTER THE BIG
GEST IN THE WORLD.
THE WALDORF ASTORIA

4 Round Thousand of Employees Nee
essary to Care for Its 1900 Rooms
Eighteen Engines in the Basement
and Laundry Which Does Week
ly Wash" of 100000 Pieces.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1900-03-29
"Wanted-A lady to superintend the

"Wanted-A lady to superintend the
education Of a little girl. Apply be-
tween the hours of and 6 at"
1t was in answer to this advertise
ment that, six years after that men,
orable afternoon upon the beach, a
lady stood waiting in the drawing
room OF the house to which she had
been directed.
Her veil was drawn, and the room
was half in shadow from the heavy
curtains which draped the window;
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27

"When l retired from the contract
ing business a short time ago." said a
well known man, II had a number of
horses that | was anxious to dispose
of. Among them was one named Jer-
ry, which for several years had been
used to working on drum. In such
work a horse becomes accustomed to
lifting his feet high to avoid striking
the hosting ropes. When the horses
were put under the hammer. Jerry
went to Harlem grocer.
about a week later the purchaser
of Jerry called at my house and told
me that he had a lot of trouble with
the horse. He said that Jerry would
go a short distance. when he would
stop short and lift his feet high, and
after doing this would go little far
Their, only to repeat it again. l told the
grocer why the horse stopped short
and lifted his feet and also advised
him to look up some contractor and
sell the animal to him for hosting pur-
poses. He did so, notifying me that he
received a larger price than he paid
me for the horse. New York Sun.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
Four Legged Weather Prophets.

Though the tortoise is an excellent
weather prophet, the fact is known to
comparatively few people. Tortoise
farmers on the African coast notice
that even "a hours before rain falls
these curious animals prepare for 1t by
seeking the convenient shelter of over
hanging rocks. 1t may be a bright,
clear, sunshiny morning, but the farm
ers believe implicitly in the tactics of
the tortoise. who is seldom mistaken.
for the downpour is certain to come
within the time stated.
A pet tortoise would be a practical
present to bestow on ones friends.
This curious premonition of the ap-
proach of rain is shared by many other
animals and birds and may be explain
ed partially by the fact that while rain
is forming the atmosphere is increas-
ing in weight, but there may also be
some need of moisture which makes
them aware of its approach or some
habits Of life which make them thus
sensitive.-Chicago Record.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
Living without Nourishment.

There seems to be no philosophical
necessity for food. We can conceive Of
organized beings living without nour-
ishment and deriving all the energy
they need for the performance of their
life functions from the ambient me-
dunn. In crystal we have the clear
evidenceof the existence of a formative
life principle, and, though we cannot
understand the life Of crystal, it Is
none the less living being. There
may be, besides crystals, other such In
dividualized, material systems of be-
ings, perhaps of gaseous constitution
or composed of substance still more
tenuous. In view of this possibility
nay, probability-we cannot apodeictic-
ally deny the existence of organized
beings on planet merely because the
conditions on the same are unsuitable
for the existence of life as we con-
ceiye it, We cannot even with positive
assurance assert that some of them
might not be present here, In this our
world, In the very midst of us, for their
constitution and life manifestion may
be such that we are unable to perceive
them.-Nikola Tesla in Century Maya
zine.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
Cool and MethOdical.

A lawyer who worthily bears a dis
tinguished name occupies an old fash
Toned mansion on the edge of New
York. His sister, who lives with him,
tells a laughable story, which is re-
ported in Harper's Round Table, illus
trating his GOODNESS and love of method.
Recently his sister tiptoed into his
room some time after midnight and
told him she thought burglars were In
the house. The lawyer put on his dress
ing gown and went down stairs.
In the back hall he found a rough
looking man trying to open door that
led into the back yard. The burglar
had unlocked the door and was pulling
at 1t with all his might. The lawyer,
seeing the robbers predicament, called
to him:
ut does not open that way, you idiot!
1t slides back"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
TOUR OF ALL MEXICO

In Pullman's finest Compartment Drawing
Room. Library, Observation and Dining Cars
all Vestibuled-with the celebrated
OPEN TOP CAR "CHILlLITLl"
for observation IN the mountains and CanOns
and dining ear In the tropics. A delightful trip
OF 3s days with THREE CIRCLE TOURS IN THE
TROPICS OF the south Of Mexico and VISIT TO
THE RUINED CITIES. All exclusive features of
itineraries of leisurely travel and long stops
The Special Train starts Tuesday, January p,
from Chicago.
TICKETS INCLUDE ALL EXPENSES EVERY
WHERE.
These select limited parties will be under the
special escort and management of THE AMERI-
CAN TOURIST ASSOCIATION, Reau Campbell
General Manager, l42s Marquette Building, Chi
cago. Itineraries, maps and tickets can be had
on application to agents Of Chicago, Milwaukee
s. st. Pau. R'y. 5i4
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27

Murat Haistead, the great journalist
of wartimes. went to General William
T. Sherman's headquarters once fer
the --latest news from the front" Hal
stead was armed with many fine In
troductory letters, but decided to rely
mainly on one given him by Thomas
Ewing, Sherman's brother-in-law. He
found the general and presented
Ewing's letter. The general opened
1t somewhat impatiently, read few
lines, folded 1t and said:
"Ah, you come from Ewing, and you
desire to have all the latest news
the next probable move Of our army,
eh? Well, there's a train leaving this
town for Cincinnati at 2 o'clock.
Here, take this ticket, and step over
there and get your dinner, and then
get ON that train"
swell, but. General Sherman be-
gan the newspaper man. But Sherman
waved him off.
go over and get a good dinner; we
have plenty and always strive to treat
our friends well. But be sure you
don't miss that o'clock trainw And
Halstead wisely obeyed.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
CHRISTIAN CHURCH DEDICATION.
Another Pretty Church Building
Opened to Services in this City.

Last Su nday the weather was stormy
but failed to cool the fervor OF the
Christian people in this city who pro.
ceeded with their church dedication.
1t is told in the following which ap.
peared in Tuesdays Des Mones Register;
A memorable event in the church history OF
this city occurred yesterday In the opening of
the new building erected by the Church OF
Christ. For six years the congregation held
services in the court house, but like the early
disciples at Jerusalem, they have Outgrown the
upper ROOM" and have now, thanks to the in
defatigable labors of Pastor MeSparran and his
fellow laborers and the benevolent spirit OF the
people of the community, one OF the most con-
yenent and handsome edifices in town for
religious work. The auditorium is 32x46 feet
with circular seats and fioor slOping to the pull
pit, back Of which is the choiI loft and dressing
rooms. The haptistry is Immediately under
the pulpit platform and is connected with the
city water pipes AT the rear of the auditorium
Is the lee ure room, 16x32 feet, with folding doors
the entire length. The first Lords Day services
began at 10 As a. m. Dean Haggard, of Drake
University, preached a short but appropriate
and very interesting sermon, after which he iset
to work to raise the 500 shortage and which IL
was thought advisable to secure before the
dedication of the building The morning was
stormy and cold and two or three inches OF
snow was on the ground. For this reason the
congregation was not as large as expected. But
the enthusiasm of Dean Haggard stirred up
those present to such a degree that hearty and
liberal response was made. Rev. b. s. Denny,
OF Des MOines, Rev. I. J. O'Connor and Kew.
MIR. Hinkhouse, the popular pastor of the
Presbyterian church, gave congratulatory adj
dresses, that OF Mr.. Hinkhouse being especially
interesting and encouraging. Rev. b. s. Denny
preached "a powerful gospel sermon In the even
ing, and succeeded In securing additional
pledges and subscriptions. Altogether about
tmo-thirds of the amount was raised 1t is con-
fdently expected that the balance will be
obtained within week. The music OF the
morning and evening service was delightful. the
choir having been specially trained for the 0c-
castion by Mrs. Carmichael, one of the leading
v0calists OF the state.
Rev. McSparran informs us the debt is
now all provided for except little over
5000, and it is expected this will be en-
tirely met within short time.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
NIGHTMARE.
The Sensation That Always Makes "a
Man n Coward

mt -
Man a Coward.
"Strange that we are always so cow
ardly in nightmares" remarked New
Orleans lawyer who has a taste for
the bizarre. Il don't believe anybody
ever lived who stood up and made a
square stand against the amorphous
horror that invariably pursues us in
such visions. When l have a night
mare and the usual monster gets on
my trail, my blood turns to water, and
my conduct would disgrace sheep.
am beside myself with stark, down
right fear, and l have no idea left in
my head except to run like rabbit.
All pride, self respect, dread Of ridicule
and even the instinct of self defense
are scattered to the winds, and | be-
lieve, honestly, l would be capable OF
any infamy in order to escape. | have
no hesitation in confessing this, be-
cause, as far as l have been able to
find out, everybody acts exactly the
same way in the throes of nightmare,
and l feel certain | would not make
such a pitiable spectacle of myself in
real life, no matter what might befall.
II think that the explanation of the
nightmare panic is to be found in the
fact that the dream is almost invari-
ably accompanied by sense Of suffo-
cation. 1t is well established that
choking-the shutting off of ones
wind to use a homely phrase-has an
effect upon the mind which is entirely
distinct and different from that pro-
duced by any other form of pain or
peril 1t fills the victim with such hor-
ror and distraction that he is for the
moment insane. He will do anything
to get relief. This has been brought
out on more than one occasion in the
defense of men who have been choked
and killed their assailants, and judges
have held that the circumstances Of
such an attack should be given special
consideration as extenuating the deed.
In dreams the entire nervous system is
relaxed, and 1t is natural to suppose
that the mental effect of suffocation
would be intensified. At least, that is
the best apology have to offer for my
sprints through nightmare land. New
Orleans Times-Democrat.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27

In one of Chauncey NJ. Depew's
stories he told of meeting a man as
funny as himself.
Zone day." said Mr.. Depew, Il met
soldier who had been wounded in the
face. He was a Union man. and /
asked him in which battle he had been
injured.
In the last battle of Bull Run, sir,
he replied.
"'But how could you get hit in the
face at Bull Run? l asked.
"'Well, SIR said the man, half apol-
ogetically, after / had run a mile or
two l got careless and looked back E"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
why He Carries a Cane.

"You wonder why l always carry q
cane except when am carrying an
umbrella" remarked well known
Philadelphia the other afternoon.
"Well, don't mind telling you. It's all
on account of umbrellas"
Cant see the connection" rejoined
the friend to whom he was talking.
Didn't suppose you could. But you
will when | have explained. You lose
an umbrella every once in awhile, don't
you? Put it down somewhere and
walk off and leave itY
Eyes; have had that happen to me
frequently"
well, used to, but not since took
to carrying cane. An acquaintance
in Chicago put me on to the scheme.
Get a cane Of some kind he said to
me one day, and carry it every day
and every night that It doesn't rain.
BY that means you become so accus-
toned to having something In your
hand you are lost without it. Then
when a rainy day or evening comes
and you are compelled to carry an UNI
brella about with you the benefit comes
In. Say you have gone into restau-
rant and when you come out the rain
has stopped. You walk out into the
street without your umbrella. Presto!
After you have taken perhaps a dozen
steps you miss something. Your cane
carrying hand is minus the burden 1t
usually bears. Back go your thoughts
to your umbrella and back go your
steps to get it. Simple? OF course 1t
is, but the simple things oftentimes
prove the most valuable. "-Philadel-
phia Inquirer.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
Court Notes

When we went to press last week the
case of Weighton VS. Mrs. Weber ct al
was not concluded. 1t went to the
jury Friday noon. Saturday forenoon
they returned verdict for the
defendant.
Ora Heater plead guilty and was SEN
fenced to one year in the penitentiary.
Some little other business was trans
acted by Judge Wheeler and he left
for home Saturday noon. His honor,
the new Judge, made good impression
on our people and our lawyers in the
two weeks he was here. The attorneys
who had business before him say that
he is the. making of one of the best
judges in this part of Iowa. They say
he has honor, integrity and fairness,
and besides, that he can grasp legal
propositions quickly and evinces good
knowledge of law. He is good stu
dent and hard worker and will no doubt
render excellent service.
Judge Green will continue the term
commencing next Monday. The fol-
lowing list of jurors have been sum-
moned to appear then:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27

The meetings having closed at the
Graves school house, there will be regu.
lar services at the Evangelical church.
SABBATH school at 10 a. m. Preaching at
IL a. IN. and 7 p. m.
In the interests Of the meeting to com.
mence one week from Sunday evening
Jan. 9th, there will be week of prayer
observed, beginning next Monday even
ing(Ne Years eve)at seven o'clock. All
who are concerned in the extension Of
the Kingdom of Grace are earnestly SO.
licited to assist in these services. Rev
G. W. McCracken is to assist in these
meetings. NJ }. Common, Pastor
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
Sulphur VIII Put Out Fires.

Grant me space in your paper to
make more generally known fact
which has been known to me many
years and doubtless to others, that sui
phur thrown into the fire of a stove,
furnace or fireplace will instantly ex-
tinguish the fire in a chimney or tiue.
If small bag or parcel of sulphur,
say three or four ounces, were kept in
handy place and used when needed
as directed above, it might be the
means of saving property and perhaps
life.-Letter in New York Times.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
STICK TO SIMPLE FOOD.
The American Business Mans Pace
Demands Easily Digested Dishes.


''There was In the old days far less
wear and tear upon the nerves, and,
under such conditions, digestion was
more completely performed" writes
Mrs. s. 7. Rorer of why l Am Op-
posed to Pies" in The Ladies' Home
Journal. 1.-The mothers of today must
look more carefully to the building of
their bodies and brains than their
mothers and grandmothers did. In
deed at the pace at which we Ameri-
cans are going we use our brains at
full speed nearly all the time. What
man can build brain and Drawn on
pies, layer cakes or preserves or any
other mass Of material which from its
very complexity requires labor and
time for digestion, drawing the blood
from the brain to the stomach during
his working hours? Observe those who
eat their complex foods carelessly and
hastily and you will see at a glance
the conditions that necessitate com
plete rest every now and then, or an
early nervous breakdown.
''In my close observation in the last
20 years find very few people in our
common struggle for existence who can
for any length Of time eat carelessly Of
complex foods. At 40 or so man may
perhaps have accumulated wealth. but
not health, and Of what earthly use is
the first without the second? Many
persons In the generation gone before
have eaten pies at least once a day,
but they have not had meat three times
a day, nor have they rushed at our
pace. They gave more time to the d.
gestion Of the pie. People who recon-
mend these rich foods rarely know any
thing Of their complex conditions and
still less Of the completely Of diges-
tinn -
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1900-12-27
The Blue Pencil,

"Thls," said the man who was show
ing the visitors about the Office Of the
metropolitan daily, sis the copy read
ers' room. 1t is the place where the
matter sent in for publication is boiled
down to the right dimensions"
Doesn't that make it warm" gig
gled one of the young women.
NO" he replied. But the men who
write the stuff get pretty hot over II
sometimes" -Chicago Tribune.