Waterbury Democrat., 1900-10-29
HE DIDN'T BUY A SAW
r. Sounded Ensy When Ills Wife Pro- posed It, Dut It Was Different
 - in the Shop.

F When sthe sman with the red mus taehe Started down the stairs his wife ian sto the door and called him back, says the New York Sun.
 '"Donald,"' she said, II want you to go, into h hardware atore to-day and get a saw. Don't forget it, please. We need one badly"
 Being an accommodating person, the man with the red mustache said he'd get it. He chose the luncheon hour as the most opportune time for making his simple purchase. He was in good humor and he smiled blandly when he went bustling into the store and said: II want a saw, please"
 The clerk who had como forward to wait on him had a merry twinkle in his eye and the twinkle .overfowed at the question and spread all over his face in dimples.. D.
 What ki1fd sof asaus?'' he asked.
 The prospective purchaser began to perceive what an intricate business the buying of saw really is.
 Why. said he, T don't know. Just Q saw. Any kind will do, suppose"
 The clerk sighed. If you only knew what you wan. to use it for, perhaps 1 could advise you," he sug- .gested.
 1.'What I want to uso it for?'' echoed the man with the red mustache. :'Why, l want to saw, of course. At least, my folks do.''
 Saw what? 9" asked the clerk.
 II don't know,' admitted the non- plussd shopper.
 The clerk frightened up again and led the way to-the rear of the store. II will show you few of the different varieties of saws we have on hand" he said. "Observation and an eypla- nation of their uses and prices may as sist you in making q decision. Here's metal saw. It is the hardest saw there is. It is made of highly tempered steel . and will saw iron, copper, lead and all manner of metals. It is small in size and sells for S2 to S2.50, according to the style of the handle, which comes in beechwood and oak, the latter being more expensive. Is that the kind of saw you want?'
 The man with the red mustache was sorely perplexed. "No," said he, T don't think so. We have no metals St our house to work on, that l know |. of''
 "Perhaps you would like a meat saw?" suggested the clerk. "Steel in these is of hardly so high grade and I could let you have a good one for dollar. But you're not a butcher"
 The man who wanted a saw shook his head mournfully and the clerk con- tinUed:
 There is regular kitchen saw, for general utility purposes, which will cost you only 50 cents. How does that strike you? No? Then here's the cab inet makers saw. 1 can give you a very good one for three dollars. Then I have over here plumbers saws, the fine delicate saws used by all manner of artifcers and the ordinary wood saws which cost you anywhere from 50 cents to four dollars. In that back room we have still other varieties-the f two-man ten-foot saws, buzz saws and circular saws. If you want to pay. a big price you'd better take one of the latter. I'll give you a good one for $50. Would you like to see them?"
 The man with the red mustache looked around wondcringly.
 No, I thank you," he said. T never dreamed that there were so many diff ferent kinds of saws. l guess l won't take one till I find out just what kind I want"
 The clerk bowed affably. ''I regret being unable to make a sale," he said, "but I really think that the wiser plan"