The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1900-05-11

OF boat that was demanded Of him.
Mrs. Jobson got into the stern sheets
with many nisgivings and with the
look of one who is breathing silent
prayers, but Mr.. Jobson stepped heav-
lily in with the air of q deep water,
heavy weather cox I'M of q pirate cap
tain's gig.
@"Just pass me those oars he COM
manled the boatman, and then the
boat was showed Of. Mr.. Jobson dug
the right oar into the water as II it
was an oyster tong, and famed the
air with the left. The boat careened
to the right, and Mrs. Jobson emitted
little scream of alarm. Mr.. Jobson
glared at her. Then he dug the left
oar into the water, as II it was trying
to make sounding ut that particu-
lar spot, while he welded the right
oar as If it were cricket bat. The
boat was listed to the left, and again
Mrs. Jobson emitted little scream
of fear, holding on tight. Mr.. Jobson
glared at her some more, pulled out
his handkerchief and mopped his face,
and said deep things in his throat.
This darned machine is out of or
der" said he, ''or else you have put
job on me with the boatman, Mrs.
Jobson. I suppose you came over here
late last night and fixed it all up
with him-arranged it so that we
should both be dumped near the dock,
and the boatmsn is to rescue you and
let me go to the bottom. Then you
collect my insurance money, pay your
accessory in the crime, and"
"Hey, there!" yelled the boatman;
"catch this line, will you?"
Mr.. Jobson caught the line the boat
man threw him, and the outrigger
was pulled back to the float.
"They're bit hard to manage, as
I told you," said the boatman. Don't
you think a plain skiff is what you
want?"
Mr.. Jobson regarded the boatman
and Mrs. Jobson savagely.
'What want" he said, "is some
kind of boat, that will go through
the water-not a machine that il
purposely cranked up and fixed for
the purpose of sending people who try
to row it to a watery grave. If you've
got that kind of boat haul it out;
that's all"
The boatman deposited Mr.. and Mrs.
Jobson in a safe-lokirg skiff of the
Aat-bottomed kind, handed Mr.. Job.
son the oars, and this time Mr.. Job
son contrived to get the boat away
from the float without catching more
than half dozen crabs. The tide
was RUNNING out, and by the time Mr..
Jobson had pulled the skiff halfway
across the stream he began to pant
and snort and puff like a small steam
tug pulling an ocean steamship. The
boat meanwhile was rapidly going
down stream with the tide. Mr.. job
son mopped his perspiring face and
gazed coldly at Mrs. Jobson, who was
hanging on to the gun'ls with a pale
countenance.
"You just did this to humiliate
me, didn't you, MADAME" said Mr..
Jobson, picking up the oars and pull
ing hard for the opposite shore. Its
just pie for you to have your husband
made to look cheap in the eyes OF
the riff-raff, isn't it?''
I'm sure don't know what you-''
"Oh, no; you don't know anything
about it," snorted Mr.. Jobson. "You
didn't rock that outrigger with your
two hands so it wouldn't work as soon
as began to row in it, did you? And
you didn't wink to that boatman to
pick out the heaviest tub of q galleon
that ever crawled through the water
to make it appear that was shy in
rowing ability, did your
mr.. Jobson, we'll go down to the
Long bridge soon if you don't take
the boat further up the stream" said
Mrs. Jobson, noticing the rapid drift
of the skiff downstream, land then
Let 'er drift out to sea, madam
said Mr.. Jobson, in a tone of deadly
GOODNESS; ut would serve you right
for forming an alliance with . muir.
derous boatman to-
Then Mr.. Jobson went at the oars
and by dint of tremendous effort he
managed to fetch up on the Virginia
side, on the edge of q grass marsh;
about half mile below the point
whence they started. There he threw
out his line, and Mrs. Jobson threw
out her line, and at the end of an
hours fishing Mrs. Jobson had caught
four nice little perch, and Mr.. Job.
son hadn't got bite. Then Mr.
Jobson called a boy who was rowing
near by to come over and tow the
skiff back to the place where it had
been hired. The boy hitched his own
boat to stake, and in eight minutes
he had pulled the skiff containing Mr.
and Mrs. Jobson to the float without
so much as breathing hard.
"Madam," said Mr.. Jobson, wher
they got home, about noon, Juggling
the basketful of untouched lunch
"the next time you begin to poetize
and pipe-dream about the beauteous
spring LEAKAGE, and bomboozle mt
into embarking with you on an expe
dition in which you have conspired
to take my life, I'll be elsewhither
Mrs. Jobson; I'll be elsewhither-
that's all."-Washington Star.
Wagner a. q HumOrist.
When Wagner's energy was not ex
pended in his art work, says Gusta,
| Kol,ho -, CIV a npor's porco 1;<vsS ~