davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
WIT AND WISDOM.

It's climbing hills before they come
to them that makes some people tired.
Chicago Daily News.
Some men have to waste so much
time in making a living that they have
none left to exist in.-Puck.
Penelope-"Whst made George and
Alice break their engagement Clar-
issa-"He complained that she was too
'effeminate' for the present day
London Answers.
Afew people are naturally well be-
haved: They never talk too much;
they never 10 foolish things. But the
great majority are always regretting
a foolish word or foolish action, and
seem to get into trouble as naturally
as a duck gets into water.-Atehison
Globe.
An
met Mime. Capilla, Ell? All, there's a
woman Of whom it may truly be said:
her face is her fortune" Thingum-
bob-"Professional beauty, eh?" Nc
Jigger-"No; she's a bearded lady
Philadelphia Press. q.
Lord Salisbury invariably lunches at
the kthnaeum. the most solemn Of
London clubs, tie membership Of
which consists Of eminent doctors,
judges, lawyers, and, above all, bish-
ops. One rainy day, as the premier
was starting out TO his MONDAY meal,
one of his secretaries observed that
he had no umbrella. He rushed after
the chief with his own, a silyer-mount-
ed one. "No, no." said Lord Sails
bury; 1--WE lost too many in the Ath-
naeum l cannot trust the bishopsl"
Wave.
Editor and Poet.-"I am afraid
said the poet TO the editor, that you
don't exactly grasp the depth OF the
ideas expressed in my blank verse
perhaps not" said the editor, '"They
may be beyond my mental reachsS' Il
think you wrong yourself" said the
poet, kindly. LET me test the point,
Here is a line at random; She swift
ly passed him down the silent way
And in her path a subtle perfume lin
gered.' There, that doesn't seem con
fused to you. does III" "Not at ALL
replied the editor, briskly, that,
easy. You are simply trying TO say
that a gasoline automobile went down
the pike.r-Cleyeland Plain Dealer.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
IT WAS ONLY A BABY.



A tragedy was ayerted in rag time
in the park recently, The day was
bright aud balmy and the usual
throng Of rich aud poor were gath
cred there to enjoy the fresh air
and nee the usual sights. The rich
rode in CARRIAGES the poor walked.
and the tramps. TO whom every day
is Sunday, leu M ed upon the benches,
relates the New York Times.
About three O'Clock In the afternoon,
over near an entrance, a shout was
heard which at once attracted the at
tenilon Of HUNDREDS Of persons A
span Of terri6ed horses attached to a
light road wagon appeared around a
curve and sped toward the center OF
the park. Then out from one Of the
walks, 200 yards ahead Of the runa-
way horses, came a little girl. She
was about six years old. In her arms
she carried q baby almost as big as
herself. The infant was deeked with
4 sprig or two Of green.
The little mothers back was
turned to the oncOming horses. A
see~dy-lOoking maj with a dirty face
and greasy clothes sprang from the
sidewalk and threw himself at the
horses reins- He caught them, held
on for q moment, and was hurled to
one side. a moment later a distin-
guished-looking man in the walking
garb Of fashion saw the child ahead,
and as the runaways charged past
him he threw away his cane and
dashed into the roadway. He caught
the bit Of one Of the horses, and was
also flung violently TO one side. A big
policeman saw a tragedy impending
and ran to reach the child. The little
girl turned. saw the horses coming
and stood for a moment patalyzed
with fear. At last she darted forward
but as she did so she stumbled ant
fell, dropping the baby. Then sh,
mad. n feeble scramble, Just sufR'
Client to clear her from the horses
heels, but the baby lay quietly, pnd
the next moment the horses and wag
on wheels had dashed over its littl,
body,
A cry of horror arose from thu
SPECTATORS The policeman reached
the baby first, closely followed by III,
man Of fashion aud the tramp, botl
bresthless- The little girl was stand
ing crying at the side OF the roadway
The policeman stopped and tenderl,
picked up the baby from the dust
Then he smiled,
"why, It's a big rag doll" said he
"'Pon my word, il Is" said the maj
Of fsshion.
"Well, III be blowedi" remarked
the seedy individual,
Here. little girl" said the police
man, che rily, there's your baby. No.
hurt a bit. Now go and find you
mother"
sand buy some candy on the way
said the man Of fashion, squeezing
dime into the little girls hands.
"You VVus born lucky, you wus,'
said the tramp to the child.
And the three kinsmen, made so b.
one touch Of nature. struggled ou'
from the gathering crowd and wen
their several ways,
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
LITTLE KNOWN OF THE ARMY.
The strength OF Chisa's Armed Force
csnno BE Accurately
Estimated.

Lord Charles B~eresford, who recent
ly made a thorough investigation Of
the Chinese army, declares that not
even the imperial government at Pc
king knows the real strength of the
military forces. Some Of the com
mands are Msnchu and some Chinese
distinct tine one from the other. He
says: "The armies Of the north and
about Picking are all commanded by
Manchu princes. The Msnchu armies
are supposed to be 10000 strong, but
there is no Manchu army efficient,
either In drill. discipline or organlza-
ton, throughout the empire. The
Manehu force Is divided and Is quar-,
tered In most Of the big towns
throughout China, such as Marking,
! HHngchow, Foochow and otner places.
All the Manchu armies are under
command Of Mahoha or Tartar gener.
ala They have considerable privil-
eyes over aud above those allowed TO
the Chinese. Every Manehu, whether
In the army or not, is supposed to
be given his rice and three taels a
month by the government. II not be.
longing TO the army be Is liable TO be
enrolled II required.
The viceroys Of the Provinces have
no command over or authority over
the Manchu armies commanded by
Manohn generals. Manchu generals
have considerable rights in the prov
incss where they are quartered over
the Manehu subjects. All the armler
In the provinces except the Manchu
garrisons are maintained at the ex.
pense Of the viceross. In the province
ct Chill Gen. Yuan Shi Kai's army and
the imperial armies at and around Pc.
king are maintained by the board OF
revehue ont Of imperial taxes. These
state-psid imperial armies are not
supposed o-be sent away from Picking.
Every soldier throughout the empire
10 supposed 10 receive three taels q
month. There are different systems
in each province and In every army as
70 pay, food-and clothing. In some
! armies the men are paid TO feed and
/ elothe themselves. In other armies
they are fed and clothed 1.iis matter
IL left entirely In the hands OF the
general commanding. As the gener.
ais. like all authorities in China, only
receive Q nominal salary, they make
large profits, or squeezes, during their
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
THE FEAR OF DEATH.
Filipino Warriors Do Not
surrender Readily,


II Is ignorance and fear upon the
part Of the natives that are prolong.
Ing the war in the Philippines, accord.
ing to Frank w. Cheek, first leuten.
ant oil the Forty-elghth infantry, ig.
norance Of the ethics of wal and fear
OF death when captured, says THE De
troit Free Press.
Lieut. Cheek is a Detroiter, and he
has this to say in a letter 10 William
NiDkler, OF $50 Medium avenue:
"Theie people for the most part are
moi benighted and ignorant than
ne the negroes in slave times. They
are wholly uneducated and do not
know what they are fighting for. /
will Instance the case Of a captain
named Mendoza, whom ! helped can.
ture. After we had fed him, he told
ms where we could find riAes, smmuni.
lion and other supplies. lie seemed
70 be ip a very depressed state of
mind, and after he had told us prac.
tically all he knew of the movement,
OF the enemy he asked permission to
write mis- wife a farewell letter, which
was granted him. Then he asked AT
what time his execution would take
place We'll, you ought to have seen
The expression Of surprise on his face
when we told him that we were NOT
going TO kill him, that he was only
aprI'oner OF war and would be treat.
ed as such, according TO his rank. He
then told ms that II ne aud bis fol.
lowers had known this they would
have surrendered months ago. They
had been %laboring under the Impres.
SION that they would he killed as soon
a. captured,
"rhe Filipino war has, however
taken a back seat al this place fson
FERNANDEZ and everyone Ia n~nxiously
hoping to be ordered TO China. Al.
ready 5000 troops have been ordered
from these Islands. My regiment bs,
made some very important eautprea
among them being Palermo. tae Zee
I.'ary OF war and other bieh officials
NY company has Just come in from
. l@weess' bike through the NOM.
talns and we are now resting un N,
q lew weeks. The regiment Is sca,.
: tered oct for about 90 mi,es"
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

The Rock Islands proposition for cheap rats
excursions 20 and from Colorado during thi'
summer has been Begatived by the Western
Passenger Association. In consequence notes
was served yesterday on Chairman heLeot
by General Passenger Agent sebastian tina
the Rock Island viii take Independent action
and put in effect rate Of one fare plus sac
for the round trip from Chicago and all Inter
mediate points east Of tbs Missouri ' tC
Denver. Colorado springs, Pueblo, salt Lake
City aud Ogden. Tickets at this nate will b'
sold on jun 81. July 9 and u and August !
frum Missouri river points the same rate viii
Je made on the days following thsse dates
Tickets al this rate also will be sold from Mis-
sour river rnteways, Kansas City to omaha
inclusive. on July !. : and .. Pour special ex
c%ursious will also be run by the Rock Islant
from Colorado common points TO Chicago anC
intermediate stations on June p, July Il ane
~ and August 4. These excursion tickets
both east and west bound. will be limited foI
return passage 10 October 81. The Rock islan'
~ Intention Of placing In service
special trains Tor these excursions, Leaving
Chicago nj S y. M and making the nut u
Colorado with only one night on the road
Chicago Tribune.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
~BURLIHeroH ROUTE

New Through Trains IL Portland Aui Puget
Sound. THE B~uriington-N Northern PAcinic
Express. a New Daily Through Train from
Kansas City aud 81. Joseph for Lincoln,
Northwest Nebraska Black Hills. wyoming.
Montana, Washington. Tacoma, Seattle.
Puget Sound md Portland. Oregon, via BIZ.
hngs. N0ntaBA-the hhort line and time saver
to the Upper Northwest. To Central Montana
10 % houn; 10 the Puget Sound In 70 hours
from the Missouri River. Through coaches
and chair cars. through tourist sleepers,
through dining car service and standard
sleepers This 10 the main Travelled road Ms
sour River 70 the Northwest.
Number 10. Kansas City and u. Joseph 20
Nebraska. Denver. Colorado, Utah, Pacific
Coast and the Northwest. via Ogden; also 10
The Northwest-Montaba, Warrington, Ore
gon, via Lincoln and Billings. Weekly Call.
iornia Excursions.
Number q. "NebrAskao Colorado EIpress,''
from Kansas CITY sud 81. J~oseph-the latest
night train for Nebraska. Colorado. Utsn and
Pacific ICosst
To the Rast Chicago and D. Louis, greatly
imr-oved trains In time and equipment,
To The Norb' Best trains daily To Omaha.
St. Paul. Minneapolis and the Lake Region.
J. Q. BkAMHALL, L. W. WAKELY,
Tray. Psss's ACT, Genl Pass'r Ar,
"a Main Street. st. Louis, No
KaDsas City, Mo.
HOWARD ELLIOTT;
General Manager,
D. Joseph, No
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
GOING BACK ON THE SHERIFF
A Friend Who Had Been Treated
white Refuses 10 give That
Omcinl n Chance.

"BiIl," said the sheriff, as they sat
talking and smoking in front of the
county Jail, relates Harper's Maya.
zine-'Bill, hain't | allus used 20, like
a white man2"
"Yo' bet yo' hev, Jim--yo' beti" re-
piled Bill.
."Alus had a sip o. Ticker when 20
como around, hain't 10"
"Yo' hey, Jim-yo' hey, and good
ticker. too"
Never let yo' go hankerin' fur q
chaw Of terbaeker when | had one
hey ~"
"Never. Jim-never!"
"Allus gin yo' the best cell in my
Jail to sleep in when yo' had troubl,
at homer"
"Allus, JIM Yo've ben mighty kind
to me. and hain't the man to forgit
IT,"
"Waal, I've allus tried to treat yo
white, Bill. and now I'm goin' to gin
yo' a chance TO squar' things. I've
ben fggerin' a bit. and blamed IL il
amt more'n TO- weeks since I've ar.
rested a single critter! Seems some.
how as II everybody's agin me lately
and won't do a thing to git locked
uplf
"Sheo! Hain't jailed a critter in 70
weeks-ehg"
Mary a one. Bill. and shuck my
hide III amt gittiR' mighty upset
about II. Bime-by they won't hev nc
use fur a jail here, and III git the
bounced Bill, would yo' like to do M,
a leetle fayor-Jest a leetle onel"
"Yo' bet, Jlm-yo' jest beti"
Thank yo', Bill. Jest go uptown
and steal a boss, or pop at some TELLER
and gin me a chance to arrest yo'
I'll put the shackles on yo', and meb.
be shoot at yo' a couple Of times, and
we'll make folks think they've got 4
jail and a sheriff in this ole town.
"B-but. Jim, yo'-n
IN gin yo' the best cell In Jail and
all the terbacker yo' kin smoke fur
yo'r trouble. too"
"W-why, yo' See"
"And, Bill" continued the sheriff.
as he pulled out a big horse pistol and
handed 1t TO the other. iii yo' happen
to hit a man and hev to hang fur It,
IFIN - -
III make it a slick thlng-blamed II |
DON'T"
"J-Jim. I-can't do it nohowl'
stammered the migrate. "Td like DOW.
erful well TO obleege yo', fur yo'ye
ben mighty kind TO me, but | know
the ole woman would be agin it-dead
agin II. Jim"
How would she be agin it?" asked
the sheriff.
why, leayin' her a wilder and all
that"
But yo' amt no good, and she'd
be better of as a wilder. Air va,
gwine back on me after all I've done
fur yo'?"
wall, yo' see, Jim, yo'-"
"That's 'nuff, Bill swan-don't say
no more I've allus used yo' like a
white man, and now yo' throw me
down. Yo' needn't never come loa6n,
round my place agin, and jest lei me
tel 20 that yo'd better hump yo'selt
out OF sight now afore I take n no.
ton to pop yo' over and arrest mysel,
to keep the ole Jail in worldn' orderI"
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
ENGLISH CRED P
vented with the Aid of n
Telegraph BOY.

English red tape Is a queer thing"
observed welLknown New York poll
tlcian who lately returned from a Wis
It to London to a Washington Star
writer "More than once | ran foul of
II within the sacred precincts Of the
British house Of commons. One day
] had an engagement to meet an Irish
N. p. there some is minutes before
the house opened. I handed my card to
the biue-coated functionary who guard
ed the entrance corridor, with the re-
quest that be hand il to the NJ. p. in
question,
"fSOry, SIR said he, Il cawn't do
It, There hain't hany messengers ere
yet, and my horders is not to take hany
cards myself
Persuasion and entreaty were alike
wasted upon him, Having had previous
experience Of the potent influence OF a
shilling or two judiciously bestowed. |
attempted bribery. But he proved to
be in corruptible.
The situation was embarrassing and
annoying. Ny engagement concerned
a matter Of Importance 10 myself al
least knew that the NJ. p. was with,
in a few hundred feet OF me and there
| Was sfectually prevented from get,
ting at him by a barrier of red tape,
as II there stretched stone walls anC
iron bars between US. At last / no
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

L
$50 ,n,e"u VI wy msu
N@o'
any
s
N
mH.
- ~
Co..
-. NJ 60 ~.
,..I.saa- 49,,
w. -. hnn~h~. I..n-sS 81 a.
ar 800 osHs.. .ona.mn.d
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tr,m ro,n. a. n,,. - IN.
r.n.om w. $3.50 an M go
a, ,rouh,,. -. ,omss o~., /, Nv.
In. ~, /, +. ~, st,siar ~.
-. IN S..Ln.,.. -. -, 81 a.
N. hr;~h, "a -ornina 81. W.
a.. ,Ict. J..n. q N. sh.Im =, On.
.aa- Nv. ~. a..d. hs.r d. sh,oud.
r.nd and A.. g~sv, hn1o.Ls hs.y. =.
". cr,... ~ 20 an. r.-,rr..,,on ana
LMA ~ MhG ANNNI
M. ne. n. ~, h.lisv.,h r. NJ.
,ho,gh n. 49,. d..d w. .h.n r.
~ w. w.n, ,ns,isc.;;or. sp.ins
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Goa ,h,orsh orr LA Jssns ch,is, -
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a. Al. IorS -. CT, "a ,ho,
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rDa.r cond.m,.aon' .Tksrs, ro,-
$780,. r@-s.I...ti~u -
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h.osr-.a 4. Tn a. In, u,
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49,
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The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

Al a time when every man ro,..
D child In Colorado Springs Mas in'
.eallng IN mining stock aud nl,pos,
,ury man woman and child had been
DauiS bitten, 1t happened tha, a cer'
,ain mine owner and stock manlpul,
Tor dled suddenly, The local p"ner
nelu me press 10 put In an aceonni y,
s,s death headed; Death Loves n
en.ning Mark but when II came an,
, people with whom he had Ind bis
ouslnrs dealings were surprised ma
ing sbark"-Sep Francisco wave
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
nALIroRNIL,s sENGoFkrEssIAL.


An Admission Day Semi. CsntenniAl
Celebration will be held in San Francisco
California, September s I II, inclusive.
-Four days and nights OF festivities
Gorgeous spectacular features. Well
worth crossing a Continent TO participate
in. Naval reviews, parades Of U. s.
troops, regattas, concerts, fireworks, field
sports, excursions, and many novelties oi
surprising Interest. The e~restest eehe6ra-
tim Of its kind ever given 10 California.
The sautAFe Routes new San Francisco
line affords q quick and comfortable
means Of reaching the Golden Gate City
Round trip tickets on sale. Inquire Of
J.. D. EASTER, JR-, :
Agent A. T, as. F.. Ry.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

The Chinese consider themsely,. mn,
superiors on many grounds, but lorpsI,
because they were the inventors Of W..
rious arts which are fundamental IN on,
own civilization. They were the ersl
discoveries Of Rk, though even at tbc
present day they employ by preference,
wnat Is commonly known as India ink
N. Y. Times.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
GODS OF THE CHINESE,
Az Dsities Are Embodim ents Of ths
viFtues Of Dead GREAT
Men,


Contrary to general supposltion, the
ieities Of the Chinese are not mythical
Each Of them IL supposed TO be pat.
termed after and TO embody the noble
traits Of some man who has lived In
the past. Confucianism Is now we'll
understood, and both Buddhism and
Taoism have been 80 thoroughly ex.
plored that II Is hard to believe that
anything Of importance relating there
to Is to be discovered, At least one
more book upon this topic, however,
remains TO be complled-namely, Q
Chinese NEUROLOGICAL dictionary. Such
a work should contain an account Of
all the principal dlvinities actually wor.
shipped by the Chinese, with authentic
details OF such as are historical, to-
gether with a record Of the steps BY
which many Of them have been pro-
NOTED In the Chinese pantheon, until,
Ike Ruan'm, the god Of war, from very
humble beginnings they have become
"adJuTspt OF Heaven" The number Of
these divinities is very large and In
cludes many that have been contin.
uously worshiped for over 1000 years.
Whether the Chinese have ever at
any time In thelf long history had per.
ception or conception OF one true God,
FEATHER and Creator Of all things" is
. question that has been long and
l%sarnedly discussed by scholarly stu.
dents Of their classical writings. II
Is still en- open question. But therei IL no
ioubtat all that for many centuries past
they have worshlptd the sun, the moon
the stars and = hosrof an eestral delties.
All the gods Of China may be said 10
have been dead men, and, by the right
Of ancestral worship. II may be affirmed
that In q sense all the dead men OF
China are gods. Temples are constant.
iy erected. by tho consent Of the EN-.
psror, 10 men who, while living, have In
various ways distinguished themselves
IL Is Impossible 10 say that any one O.
these men may not, IN the slow evolu
tion Of ages. rise to the highest plao.
nmong the national divlnities. Their,
san, therefore. be no dOub, whateye.
that as q astion the Chinese are poly
theistic.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

Trains No, lol aud 10. daily except Sunday
All other trains daily.
Excursion tickets sold 10 Kansas City satnr-
lay evenings. Sunday mornings. and Sunday
evenings az one fare for the round trip, good
Tor return up to aud including Monday morn
ing following.
Through tickets and checks TO All rolnts.
found trip tourist tlcketson sale TO all tourist
points.
For further information call on or address:
W. $. LYONS, Ticket Agent,
Telephone No. 50.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
R0Nn CALL.

HoiAe~ % Freedom ToWushiP Laiayeite
County. Missouri eve O. fef eeui bones Ase
hereby notified that bond numbered y
Issued Jolly ~. rsa of The denomination
81 oLolw one Thousand doliars has beer
declared dlc and payable on the ~ dAy OF
rptrmlSr laGi by TIE co uuty oouri Of said
Lafayette county. payable al the once oil
inc County Treasurer Of Lafayette County
al Lexington Missouri on which DAY and
date all Interest thereon viii crease
BY order OF the County Coart OF Lafayette
County. Missouri his gth DAY OF July, ls0.
FRANK THORNTON.
Cierk OF the County Court OF LAiayetts
COUNTY. Missour. $50
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

Gouossce Pune FOOD Co, Le Roy, n ~
Dear slrs some dsSs since a package Of
your 0nlnp preparation was left at my
omce. took y home and gave u a tidal, aud
/ have b. say ! vas very much pleased with II
a. q substitute iur o0doe We hsvo always
used no best lava aud Mocha In our family
butI am freeto say like the 0rain-O as we'll
as the lest coffee / eFeSyinnk.
Respectf64y yours,
q. IACEsON
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
THE HOT SPRINGS on ARKANSAS.
Go via the Chicago and Alton Railroad
the Short Line and Best Route.

REDUCED BOUND TRIP RATES NOW
IN EFFECT.
All OF the large hotels al Hot Springs
are now open. In addition 10 these are
hree hundred boarding houses provld,
Ing accommodations al reasonable rates.
Hot Springs, Arkansas, is the only
health and pleasure resort under dlrect
Government control. The curative
properties OF the Hot Waters are
voGched for by the Surgeon General of
10 qUnited States. Send for rates, illus
lpated descriptive matter and complete
rarticulaB.
~ II. G. sTTDHAM, Agent.
Tel. No. 50. UigoInsvilIe. Mo.
JAMES CHARLTON, u. 4. - A.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

New Departure yenitlan cOokfAg Ware,
porcelAin lining, exclusive territorr with
oct charge, samples ifeei EStp IS per day
RUaranteed. STATE experience 10 replying.
c. ID. PRAUETEprER,
ZlnesViils, o.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

charle.-Did the tailor take your
measure9
Agy-i guess he did. He said ia
have ~ pay in sdysnee.-N. Y. World.
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15
AGENTS WANTED

Aboot Of 5yer 900 pages, containing 100 illus
tratons. beautifully printed, edited BY William
The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1900-09-15

DAILY.


Special rates 70 Kansas City every SATURDAY.
evening and sunday.