Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1900-11-09
THE SICK HUSBAND AT HONE
A Transaction I'm Hats Complicated by IA
servants zeal.

ing to happen. or course, the mere
fact that Mr. Broadway was i'll was
bad enough, but she knew from eXper-
fence that his inability 10 attend 70
business was not a marker to the
trouble that would be sure TO strike
them in some FORM as result.
Mrs. Broadway stayed at home all
the forenoon and dosed her spouse and
plastered him and blistered him as
dutiful wife should, but shortly after
lunch she began 10 show signs of I'M
easiness. Mr.. Broadway had observed
these signs before and learned their
significance.
Had you intended TO go anywhere
this afternoon. Kate?" he asked
'Y-y-yes,' stammered Mrs. Broad
way, Il did have an engagement with
Mrs Harlem"
Then just you go right along, said
Mr.. Broadway. unanimously. Don't
stay here on my account. I'm getting
along beautifully. I'm spry as a crick-
ct this afternoon and would rather
prefer being alone so as to cut all tho
antics | like and scandaliZe nobody"
Mrs. Broadway was a conscientious
woman, but that day pleasure tugged
at her with rcsistless force, and after
cheering Mr.. Broadway with a few
phrases expressive of conIugal affec-
ton she began 10 array herself for the
outing. Before leaving the house she
came into the sitting room to deliver
a few parting instructions.
Il forgot all about that hat bust
ness" she said, but | guess you can
attend to it fore me. You remember
that hat | got last fall, don't you,
Jasper? the black velvet one trim
med with pyramids Of chiffon and
tufts of unclassified plumage. | never
did like the thing, it was so frightfully
unbecoming. | wore il downtown yes
terday and was conscious of looking
so much like a flying zebra that Ge-
termined TO get rid of il. | stopped
one Of those street solicitors for sec
ond hand clothing over On Sixth ave-
nue. and struck bargain with him
then and there. He viii be here for
the hat this afternoon. He's to pay
SO for It. The hat is in the box on a
chair IN my room. When ne comes
give II to him, please, and be sure to
get the money. Don't let him go away
without that. whatever YOU do. He's
y, y
All right" responded Mr.. Broad
way. confidently. I'm match for any
old clothes man that ever walked. I'll
make him fork over the money all
right. never fear about that. I've sold
old clothes myself on few occasions
and guess | know thing or two"
About o'clock the clothes dealer
came for the velvet hat Mr.. Broad
way brought the bandbox from the
bedroom and handed II 10 the man,
gingerly
You may open it, If You want to-"
he said. but it's all right"
. The dealer was a worldly-wise,
heavy-browed. black whiskerel indiv-
idual who looked as If he would cast
doubts upon the word OF angels. He
was certainly suspicious OF Mr.. Broad
way, for he raised one corner OF tae
lid and peered cautiously into the
depths of the box.
"Oh, yes" he said quickly. cts all
right" Then he paid over the So and
went away.
A little past Mrs Broadway came
home. "Oh, Jasper" she cried the
minute she entered the hall door, did
my new hat Gomez"
Your new hat" repeated Mr.. Broad
way. mo, I guess not. | didn't see
anything OF a new hat"
For the lands sake!" CALCULATED
Mrs. Broadway. Whatever can have
become Of it? / ordered it two weeks
ago so as to be sure to have it in time.
stopped into the store on my way
home and they said it was sent out
this morning. Maybe Polly took it in.
Polly. o-o-oh, Polly-y-y."
Polly came running in from the
kitchen.
Polly, said Mrs. Broadway, "did my
new hat Gomez"
"Yis, men," said Polly, ut did. l
set it on a chair in your bedroom,
and you'll find it there now"
Mrs. Broadway had dashed into the
bedroom and swept every chair and bit
of furniture in the room with a COM
prehensive eye, but there was no band
box in sight.
"Ah. here It is In the closet. cried
Mrs. Broadway, an instant later. POL
ly, your memory isn't half an inch
long. You never can remember where
you put things"
Hastily Mrs. Broadway united the
strings and lifted the lid. Then she
sank down on the floor beside the box
and raised her voice in lamentation.
THE same old velvet scarecrow!'
she walled. The same old chiffon. the
same old birds"
"The saints be praised" said Polly.
81 red up the room the minute we stip-
ped out, for | didn't like the looks O.
that box a-settin' on the chair. But
whin the new hat come | put it in
the selfsame place so yer eyes d light |
on 1t the very first thing"
Mrs. Broadway was deaf to this ex-
PLANTATION. And you gave away my |
new hat my brand new hat. to that |
clothes MANI" she said to Mr.. Broad |
way sternly.
Not gave II way, my dear. l got |
So for it," chirped Mr.. Broadway. |
bravely slappfng his hand against this |