The Washington weekly post. (Washington, D.C.) 1878-1916, 1900-10-16
The Lazy PIANIST.
She Makes s203 a Week ~ She IL Qaiek
and Clever.

Harvey ssihsFlssa IN Ainslss's
she Is lady with a past and a prosper
Gus present. she makes about s4a a week
from the exercise Of her arts. She bad
prints OF palms all over her room. but
DID not ask her for a reading, because 1
had IN my pocket a typewriter copy o,
the same spiel" that she uses she got ia
from man whom my spirit-controls tell
me vas once bootbiack. later
page In the United States Senate. ard a
protege OF a Senator who lived in ore
state and represented another He has
passed 10 the summerland now. bur my
spirit-controls seem 10 say that he had rel
hair. The page fell upon evil times. and
he cd little race track scouting ana
sSindling. He got to be doorteuder for q
palmist and obtained copy OF his spiel
IL IS very complete IN its directions. IL
begins with; Good morning; nice weather
We are having. Do you wish a fun read
ing and goes on 10 the end: Good morn
ing. Call again" In this spiel" the client
writes his name, parents living, brothers
and sisters, and his wish on an ordinary
pad, whose bottom end is held with a
clip. The client tears OF the leaf. puts Il
IN his pocket-book. and the sOOthsayer
takes the pad and is called from the
bon paper two sheets below has manifold
ed. Then the soothsayer comes back AMI
tells what the spirit controls have told.
TO the great astonishment OF the client,
who knows he has his original writing IN
mis- pocket. The spiel doesn't call him
client, though. In the directions il
says: Hand the sucker the pad" sc.
The "spiel' advises that everybody bs
told that he will live 10 be hfty-eight
years old, so that IL the sucker comes
another time he will find confirmation OF
his previous reading. There is no danger,
II says. OF two comparing the readings
and discovering that they are Identical.
because IL they had sense enough for that
they would not go near the game.
IL had room 10 describe all my expert
ences with these modern witches and wiz
ards, ] should like to tell you about the
amiable old fraud that cast my horoscope.
! He has been 10 states prison for swind-
| ling. but he adyertises In the Sunday pa
| pers Just the same as usual and his ofsice
Is run OF people whose dollars burn In
their pockets. 1 should like 10 describe
| the doctor with three framed diplomas,
| Two medlcal books, and a half-pint OF
pills. that went into trance for me hard
! ~ distinguishable from the early stages of
a nj: His wrist shook like a fiddleT's
playing Schubert's "Serenade" and his
| we tNiith W. III lutl AbDktu ike
boiled eggs with the shell off. / should
| ike TO tell about the psychic medium
| that did little miracle for me In the way
OF reading the answers To my questions
through the envelope in which they weFa
sealed. l could explain how he gave ma
| dummy TO hold while he opened the reat
envelope under cover of washing his
hands. ] should Ike 20 tell how wrong In
every particular was the lady that read
! my palm by the light of pure science. NO
| fortune-teliing about il. oh. dear no."
| should like 10 tell about the true and re-
| liable fortune-tellers" that ran the cards
| for me, and saw trouble from dark man
| and luck in the lottery with the number
8, or 500, or 5000. and how there was mon
! ey coming TO me in a letter from across
the water. OF has to come 20 me that
way or / could not pay the grocer, for
| live in Brooklyn, and Brooklyn is on Long
Island, and my little girl has Just come
homo from school with the information
that an island is body of land complete
ly surrounded by water. i had suspected
| as much)