davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12

Aunt (severely)-As l glanced into
the drawipg-room last evening saw
you with young mans arm around
you.
Niece (calmly)-Yes. auntie, l was
waiting for you to pass the door and see
us. Young men are very slippery ow-
adays, and one can't have too many
Witnes9s.-Tit-Bits
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12
Quite Unnecessary.

Jack Huggard-Shall I ask your
father?
Miss Innit-No; just tell him-you're
so big and strong you don't need to
'ask!-Puck.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12

"I am certain that Sue is engaged to
Mr.. Dinlicy," said, Miss Kittish to Miss
Flypp.
"Why. she never mentions him"
''That is what convinces me. She
used to make all manner OF fun of
him. ."-Dctroit Free Press.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12
Evidently o. X.

Mrs. Brown-Do you trust your hus-
band perfectly?
Mrs. Jones-Absolutcly. lie never
gets scared when tell him he talks in
his sleep!-Puck.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12
Excellent Reason.

Freddy, what makes you talk
from morning till night?"
SOS I'll be good comp'ny fer my
self."-Indianapolis Journal.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12
Very Simple.

She-There is really only one reason
why l prefer to remain unmarried.
He-May ask thatreason?
She-The right man hasn't proposed
Chicago Record.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12
Ne Excuse for II.
American

"They say that George Washing
ton swore occasionally" remarked
Bunting.
II don't know why he should
swear" replied Kilduff. There were
no telephones in his day."-Town
Topics.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12
The One Thiur NeedfuI.

Cholly-I wish knew what to do
with this mustache.
jssh-Why don't you put some hair
- itf-Towp Topics.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12
Not the Answer Expected.

Cecilia and fell out about my hat
what about it?"
II said it didn't become me-"
"Well?"
"She said she thought so too."-Chi-
cago Record.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12

New Cook (after installing her r.
'brary, bicycle and athletic articles in
tho kitchen)-Madam, where shall I
put all these cooking utensils? There
doesn't seem to be room here!-IIeit-
ere Welt.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1900-07-12
ONLY $500

AS an advertising medium the
PosT is one of the best in the coun-
ty. Give It a trial.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
Lilies In the South.

An interesting experiment Is now be
ing conducted by the United States
Department of Agriculture in South
Carolina and In the Southern States
with the Bermuda lily, SO popular at
Easter as a gift and for decorative
purposes Bulbs have been distrib-
uted freely in every section of Louisi'
ana and South Carolina with view to
ascertalning If the Bermuda lily will
bear transplanting to this soil.
An experiment made in the Rally ex-
perlmental station in South Carolina
was attended with the most satisfac'
tory results, and IL the same luck fol
lows the general experiment the home
markets can be supplied with the ma
tive-grown product The supply In the
Bermudas Is still unlimited, but the
stock has so deteriorated as to cause
general complaint from the receiving
florists In this country, and this re
suited In the action of the Department
of Agriculture. AS corrective meth
cd the British government has estab
llshtd an experimental station In Ber
muda to educate the natives In the
more successful growth of this, one OF
their principal industries. -Philadel
phia Record.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
Wasted sympathy.

She Is charming widow, pretty,
bright and light hearted. She was "A
charming young woman before she
married Mr.. Blank, and moved away
to live In Georgia. Her married life
was most happy, and the death of her
husband was a great loss to her, but
she bore up under 1t. After the funer-
al and a general packing up of things
she returned to her old home. The day
after she arrived she was met on the
street by one of her very solemn-faced
friends, who intended to give her u
cluster of that sympathy that makes
one feel as IL theSsympathizer had
thrown something a%and on the sym
pathlzee."
"Oh, Mrs. Blank" said the solemn
one, 81 am so glad you are so we'll"
"Yes," answered the widow, II am
as we'll as can be. l was never Ill In
my life. you know"
"And, Mrs Blank" continued the
solemn one in more solemn tones, "Im
glad 10 see you so happy"
"Why. yes. Yes, I'm very happy,
You know 1t was not that died. II
was Mr.. Blank" ."-Memphis Scimetar
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
San Francisco Market.

Wool--Spring-Nevada, 12@15c per
pound; Eastern Oregon, 12@16c; Val
ley, 2O@22c; Northern, 10@12c.
Hops-1s99 crop, 11@13c per
pound.
Butter - Fancy creamery 21c;
do seconds, 10000; fancy dairy, II
@1sc; do seconds, 15@16c per pound.
Eggs-store, 1870; fancy ranch,
lee.
Millstuffs = Middlings, $17.00 @
100; bran, $12.OO@13.00.
Hay-Wheat$ 81 .OO@9.5o; wheat and
cat $7.00@9.0O; best barley $500
7.50; alfalfa, $6.oO@7.50 per ton;
straw, 30@45c per bale.
Potatoes-Early Rose, 1906 SOC; Ore
gon Burbanks, 65c@1.00; river Bur-
banks, 40@70c; Salinas Burbanks,
S0c@1.10 per sack.
Citrus Fruit-Oranges, Valencia,
$2.75@3.25; Mexican lines, $4,000
500; California lemons 75c@$1.5O'
do choice Sl.75@2.0 100 per box.
Tropical Fruits-Bananas, $l.5OS
2.50 per bunch; pineapples, nom
inal; Persian dates, 6@6Ho per
pound.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
No COMMUNICATION Necessary

Two girls met in dry goods store
yesterday. They had evidently mol seen
each other for some time, as the trend
of their conversation proved.
what good times We used to have at
the lake." said one.
"Yes, l like our own resorts" replied
the other, better than on the coast.
oh, say, where is my old fame, Perryl
think the world of that boy"
"Oh, he's married"
"You don't say! Who tor
"Me."
well, Of all things" replied he
friend, flushing.
The conversation drifted, but shor
time later reverted TO its old channel.
Say. Hetty," remarked Perry's wife,
did you meet Johnny out In San
FranciscoT and then added, HE told
me that summer he was there that be
could not live without me-"
"Yes, l met him in Los Angeles"
Poor fellow! l feel sorry for him
He is a bachelor yet. l suppose"
mo, he's married"
You don't say! Who tog"
"Me."-Salt Lake Herald.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
TWELFTH CENSUS.
Duties and Requirements OF the eO'oo"
Enumerators-Four Schedules
Instead Of Ten.

In the census building a great room
is now the scene OF bustling activity,
the work OF preparing portfolios toi
use by enumerators in the coming
count of the population being fairly
under way. These portfolios, OF whit
ish brown pasteboard, hinged together
with black cloth, are 18 inches long
and 10 wide and tied with four sets oi
tape. The tape used is not that red
tape" which to the ordinary mind sig
nifes circumlocution and delay. The
law requires speed in the census ol
1900 and common every day white cot
ton tape will fasten the schedule-flled
portfolios in their round from habita'
tion to habitation. For convenient, ac'
curate and rapid enumeration the Uni
ted States has been divided into BOG
supervisors districts, and these in turn
into about $4,000 enumeration dis
tricts, or E. DIS. as they are called IL
the census office. Each of the 5000
enumerators is yet to be appointed,
on the portfolios a blank space is lel
for his name.
The last census found the unhappy
enumerator loaded down with from II
to l3 schedules, each having volumin
ous instructions, to master which re
quired considerable mental ability ant
power of memory. That census wa
taken under law which required emu
merators to ask many obnoxious ques
tions. The census act of 1900 happil!
for all does not require these disagree
able queries.
Four schedules, not 10, cover emu
merator's inquiries in 1900; schedule
requiring information about popula
ton, vital statistics, manufactures an
agriculture. In cities the enumerato
will seldom need the agricultural, o
in the rural districts the manufacturin
schedule, so he will infrequently carr.
more than three.
A general realization by Americal
citizens of their personal interest in
successful prosecution of the canvas
by this white-tape army should arous
sentiments of local interest and prid
in each enumeration district citizen
would concern themselves about th
selection of their registrar and loca
arbiter.
The white.tape army should be mad
} up OF men of high standard. The
should be quick, competent, courteous
tactful and truthful.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23

uneasiness whatever. I do hope you
will enjoy every minute Of your visit.
Good-by, and the God you love be with
you and take care Of you"
The dim brown eyes lighted up with
great pleasure, and her good-by sound
ed very sweet and pleasant, though 1t
was partially drowned by the noise OF
the train as II neared the station.
| tenderly pressed the toil-worn hand
she put into mine, the hand that had
labored increasingly so many years for
the husband and children she so dearly
loved, and looked at the quaint slight
figure In its tidy black dress and at the
old-fashioned bonnet In her lap. She
seemed SO sure they would be delight
ed to see her at the old home and the
children so many miles away would
miss her. The dim old eyes could still
twinkle and the sweet old face still
lighted up with a bright smile.
What unbounded faith these ole
folks have In the love Of their children
and kindred! May that faith never b'
shaken. God bless the quaint old lady
with her mods and smiles, and may sh'
have a royal reception from the "folki
at the old home," and when the chill
dren way out in Missouri write her
and may they send many loving mis-
sive to the one on earth who of all 9th
ers loves them best-God grant tia
they will remember to tell her, to tel
her lovingly and often, how much the!
miss her at home, and how Lonesome
the place is without "mother. ."-Cincin
natl Commercial Tribune.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23

pretty; amt seen nothing so nice to
look at as them there bluffs for many
u long day. Guess we'll cross the Mis-
slsslppi River pretty soon, won't weT'
"Yes, ma'am, after you leave st.
Louis; the Mississippi River, you re-
member, winds along between Missouri
and Illinois. You will see wheat fields
and plenty Of corn In Illinois,"
"That's what my son-ln-law told me;
he said they raise mighty lot of
wheat In Illinois. But, my, l amt
been this far from my children before;
never was this far from them in my
whole life. bet they'll miss me just
awful" and then the sweet old face
became wonderfully thoughtful. "My
son-in-law, the one that married my
next Oldest daughter, he's fireman on
the road; he runs out In the State; he
told me just the other day he might
have to come this time on an extra
train to st. Louis; maybe I'll see him
here: just hope | do. He makes good
money, my son-ln-law does; sometimes
he makes $50 a month; that's doing
mighty well; folks ought to get lots of
happiness and live mighty comfortable
ON $50 a month. just believe I'll
take my bonnet off; guess might feel
a little cooler" and she laid the old
fashioned bonnet in her lap and
smoothed back the hair from her tenn
pies. "And, do you know, believe |
am getting sleepy" and again she
smiled contentedly.
"You have some little grandchildren
at home, have you not, madam? Pm
afraid they will miss their 'grandmam-
MAJ children are always so fond of
their 'grandmamma.'
"Yes; my daughter says spoil the
children: l guess maybe l do. l have
five grandchildren; one of my daugh-
ters, she's got two little girls, and one
of my sons, he's got little boy. and
then one of my other girls, she's got
two little children-a little girl and n
little boy; the oldest one, she's a little
girl about d years old, and thinks there
was never no one like me. Yes, they'll
all miss grandma" and again the
quaint old face was wreathed insmiles
"My husband was back to the old home
most seventeen years ago. They were
all mighty glad to see him. When we
left there to go TO Iowa our farm
wasn't worth nothing like $40 an acre
and when my husband was there
that's seventeen years ngO-it was
worth nigh onto 500 an acre. l reck
on Just won't know the old place
You see, first we went TO Iowa, but Il
was too cold there In the wlnter-they
have powerful cold winters up in Iowa
so we sold Off the place there ant
went out to Missouri; that's where
come from now; we've done pretty wei
out there. You amt going to get OF
here. are your I'm so sorry"
"Yes, ma'am." l told her, Il get OF
here. but you don't know how glad
am to have met you. And ! do hop
you will get back to the old home al
right and find all the folks we'll an'
happy. l know they will be glad t
have you with them. The conducto
will take care of you when you chang
cars, so don't let that cause you an
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
CosmOpoIis sawmill.

The Gray's Harbor, Wash, CONNER
cial Company's sawmill plant at Cos
mopolis, employees 500 men, with lOt
men working on improvements; has
$31, 1000 monthly payroll; has a mess
house that takes care of 400 men
scores of dwellings for rent to employees
at nominal sum, and which, in con-
nection with the plant, presents nearly
a mile of frontage on Chehalis river
The company is now constructing 9
new planning mill, box factory, tanl
factory, a finished lumber storing shed
new dly kilns, and making numerous
other additions. During 1899 its out
put was 100000 feet of lumber ant
80, 900, 900 shingles.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
Northwest Notes.


Polk county. Or, has 2,508 voters
of them, l, 156 have registered.
La Grande, Or, has school popula
tion of 1877 between the ages of a ant
30.
Miss Oza Waldrop, actress, is the
daughter of Rev. Joe Waldrop, O..
Prineville, Or.
Walter Benn. Siletz Indian, is
under bonds at Toledo, Or, to answer
a charge of grand larceny.
A number of strangers are investigat.
ing the timber resources in the noun
tains west of Pedee.
Papers throughout Oregon are still
urging voters to register. More thar
half Of them are not yet on the books.
A. J. Smith is said to have given
option to parties on his 32 acres o,
oyster land on Oyster bay, WASH, the
price. to be $4,000.
The Brownsville, Or, Times sayl
the Calapoola river continues to make
inroads on land in the eastern part O.
town, though the water is not high.
Tacoma druggists have organized 8
society which will join the Retail
Druggists Association of America
One of its objects is to prevent the sale
of patent medicines and drugs IN de-
partment stores.
A. F. Carr is a Toledo, Or, mar
who went to the residence of his wife
from whom he had separated, ant
while she was absent at church
broke open the door with an ak, loaded
a wagon with what he wanted and tool
it away" Mrs. Carr will take lega
proceedings against him.
Claud Bullock, young man of q
years, of Wenatchee, Wash, accidental
ly shot himself in the left side. He
died from the injuries.
Miss Roth, Hoquiam, Wash.
nurse, has entered the government ser
vice, and will leave at once for the
Philippines.
Nineteen school teachers are employ
ed by La Grande. The four male teach
ers are paid an average OF $76 pc
month, but the female teachers ge
but $44.
A Seventh Day Adventist is givin.
Bible readings at Hilgard, Or. Witt
the aid of chart, he is endeavoring {,
illustrate and trace the prophecies o
Daniel.
Referee L. R. Shepard sold the 394
acre Walling farm in Spring valley
Polk county, Or, to W. NJ. Toner, fo
$1,000. The other bidders were D. G
Henry and ]. L. Purvine. the loves
bid being $4,000.
The city council of Pomeroy, Wash.
has passed an ordinance that no pat,
opening on to sidewalk in that cit,
shall swing outward.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
KENTUCKY BANK AN ARSENAL
London Financial Institution ls Foru'
fed Like a Boer Laager.

London Financial lnst1tutou Ae noIA
fed Like Boer Laager.
"Even a dignified bank president
must accustom himself to the strenu-
Gus life If his institution does business
in Kentucky" remarked a Chicago
bank clerk, who came back from that
State few days ago.
London, the little mountain town,
where Governor Taylor called the Leg
islature to meet, has one bank, the
First National, and that concern Is fur
nlshed with as much artillery as If 1t
were a Boer laager. The north wall OF
the bank is covered with firearms of
every description, and on a little shelf
Just beneath the paying teller's dask
three 45-callber revolvers are always
in readiness. On each side Of the cash
ier's desk loaded pistol lies ready to
supplement the guns commanded by
the paying teller. On the wall just out
side the counter are hung enough guns,
pistols, swords and knives to rOut a
regiment of outlaws.
"Some of these weapons are so vener-
able that they are regarded as curiosi'
ties than implements of destruction, but
scarcely one is unfit for service.
"On either side of a cannon ball
which is a relic of the SpanlshAmeri'
can war-placed In the bank partly as
a memento and partly to add to the ar
ray of arms-are pistols, which are al
ways loaded and easily within grasp
-Four rifles, resting on the top of the
desk rail, are likewise always ready fol
use. In another part Of the room are
two guns, more destructive than any o.
the others, so that change of weap
ons, graduating from the ordinary six
shooters to the double-barreled gun
that will NOW down half dozen mel
at time, may be made according t.
the necessities of the occasion"
"Then, Kentucky politicians have
pleasant way of raiding banks as wei
as sampling still whlsky|
81 don't know about that" laughe
the Chicago man, "but l was told tina
they bought their armament becaus
London lies in the heart Of the mour
tain feud district, where money an
life are both pretty cheap."-Chicag
Inter Ocean.
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
BACK TO THE OLD HOME.
3ogo8g@eSsa3a8aSaS5a3aS2S

strong, either; and then, too, 1t was al
most cold; and did buy some bananas,
two for 5 cents, and they were just
about half ripe; back home where !
come from you get FIVE, and sometimes
six. nice bananas for 8 cents; but,
mercy me, they do cheat you on these
railroad trains"-and the dim brown
eyes twinkled merrily.
Glancing over me, out through the
car window, over the fields Of corn, she
continued cheerfully, noddlng and
smiling:
Crops out this way look mighty
poor; guess you had too much rain.
My son-in-law has just got the most
lovely corn you ever did see; he's going
to make money this time; he's got
most sixteen acres Of the best land
Just outside the corporation line; he's
done mighty fine this year. But you
can't make nothing gardening now
DAYS: times Is too hard, and money Is
too scarce; can't sell thing; there's
so many men out Of work, and they
get Just little bit Of ground, just big
enough to garden, and raise their own
vegetables-so you can't sell nothing;
Just can't give vegetables away. Now,
my husband did gardening; he done
pretty well; always made good liv-
ing for me and the children" and the
voice trembled slightly, but then
times was not so hard them days as
now. We've got lots Of peaches out on
our place, but cherries don't do 80 well
MY, how that river winds about; just
seems as though we didn't do a thing
but Just keep crossing that river. Them
there bluffs over there look powerful
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
ApvIcEs ARE CHEERFUL.
Trade Review Makes a Favorable
Showing.

Trade Review MAKES Favorable
Showing.
Bradstreet's says: Trade advices
are, as a whole, cheerful, and the
stretch of values is apparently una.
bated, though some soft spots still pre-.
sent themselves. A permanent feature
this week has been the increase in
strength OF values of farm products,
nearly all the cereals, pork products
and cotton advancing, while materials
for manufacture, and the products
thereof, have generally remained steady
or unchanged.
Manufacturers of shoes are busy and
weather conditions have rather favored
the retailer by enabling him to dispose
of some carried-over stock.
Wool is fairly steady, but manufac.
turers are out of the market and con.
cessions can be obtained, though Lon.
don advices are better.
Southern iron advices are of steady
prices, and OF rather more inquiry on
export account. Except Immediately
in Chicago, where idleness of many
thousands of men has cause dullness
in the machinery and kindred trades,
the Western iron situation seems a
strong one.
Structural material is in better re.
quest and some very large contracts
will shortly be placed.
Wheat, including flour, shipments
of the week aggregate 2.277, ,450 bush
els, against 2,2SO,57S bushels last
week, 4,114,O46 bushels in the CORE
spending week of 1899.
Business failures in the United States
for the week number 100, as compared
with 189 last week, 205 in this week 8
year ago, 239 in 1898, 23S in 1897
and 300 in 1896.
Business failures in Canada for the
week number 28, as compared with 81
last week, 2l in this week year ago
2S in 1898, 36 in 1897 and 40 in 1896
The Hood River glacier. (Hood River, Or.) 1889-1933, 1900-03-23
PACIFIC COAST TRADE,
Seattle Markets.


Onions, new, $2.25@2.50 per sack.
Lettuce, hot house, 45c per doz.
Potatoes, new, $l5@1S.
Beets, per sack, 75@85c.
Turnips, per sack, 60c.
Carrots, per sack, SOC.
Parsnips, per sack, 75@85c.
Caulihower, 75c@$1 per dozen.
Cabbage, native and California,
$1.O0@1.25 per 100 pounds.
Apples, $1.25@1.5O per box.
Prunes, 60c per box.
Butter-Creamery, 28c per pound;
dairy, 17@22c; ranch, 17c per pound.
Eggs-15@ lee.
Cheese-Native. 15c.
Poultry-13@1 lac; dressed, 14@1 15c;
spring, S..
Hay-Puget Sound timothy, $12.OO;
choice Eastern Washington timothy,
$l8.OO@19.0O
Whole, $SS.OO; cracked, $2S;
feed meal, $2S.
Barley-Rolled or ground, per ton,
$40;
Flour-Patent, per barrel, $3.25;
blended straights, $500; California,
1926; buckwheat -four, 5000; gra.
ham, per barrel, $500; whole wheat
-four, 800; rye -four, $S.80@4.0O.
Millstuffs-Bran, per ton, $1,000;
shorts, per ton, $500.
Feed-Chopped feed, $1,000 per ton;
middlings, per ton, $40; oil cake meal,
per ton, $4,000.
Fresh Meats-Choice dressed beef
steers, 1900; cows, &c; mutton Sc;
pork, INC; trimmed, SC; veal, 81 @
10c.
Hams-Large, 1Sc; small, 13A;
breakfast bacon, 121ac; dry salt sides,
| &c.