davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
The Irony of Fate.

Speaking of the queer flukes of luck
In the goldfields of Alaska, a writer in
Ainslee's Magazine says:
"Often after the pile is made acct
dent, disease or death steps in to pre-
vent its legitimate enjoyment.
zone man dropped dead when at the
weighing of the first clean up he found
himself rich man. There was some
thing wrong with his heart. He had
the physical strength to make the fight
against bad food and water, to endure
the back breaking toll of developing
and working out and all the strain OF
the uncertainty that went before. The
supreme moment of success was more
than he could stand, and the use of
the gold passed from him with its &C.
quirement.
"a certain James Meade lay down
with typhoid fever in an outlying camp
just as he was starting for home with
the accumulations of the year, and he
and his bag of dust entered Dawson
together on n litter 1t took six men
TO bring him matchmaking four TO
carry and two to rest-and he paid
each man SO day. Once in Dawson
Meade seemed to grow better, and
when his sailing day came he walked
to the boat He reached the wharf and
fell dead as he was about to 60
aboard"
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
Sarcasm From the Pulpit.

"Bruddren and sistahs," sternly said
good old Parson Woolimon after the
collection had been taken up upon q
recent Sabbath morning, before the
hat was done parsed expounded the
request dat de congregation contribute
accawdin to DER means, and sho eX-
perforated dat yo' all would chip in
magnanimously. But now, upon ex-
aminin de collection, | finds that de
concocted amount contributed by de
whole posse oh yo' am only the signifi-
cant and pusillanimous sum of sixty
free cents. And at dis junction dar
amt no 'casion for yO' all to look at
Brudder Slewfoot, what done circum-
ambulated de hat around, in no such
suspicious manner, for, in de fust
place, Brudder Slewfoot amt dat kind
Of a man, and, in the second place,
done watched him like hawk all de
time muhself. No, siXty-free cents was
all dat was flung in, and | dess wants
to say dat, in my humble opinion, in
stead oh contributin accawdin to yo'
means, yo all contributed accawdin to
yo' meanness. De choir will now IA
vor us wild DER reg'lar righteousness"
-Harper's Bazaar.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
A Newspaper wonder.

When you open up your newspaper,
it may cause you to feel some wonder
if you know that in all probability
yours are the first hands that have
ever touched its inside pages. The
reason for this is that the paper is
made from wood pulp. The woodman
cuts down spruce tree. 1t is hauled
to the mill. There machinery strips off
the bark, reduces the wood to pulp and
makes ii into paper
At every turn cranes, derricks,
chains, cogs, rollers, steel teeth and
other mechanical contrivances keep the
material out of human hands. The
immense rolls are wound by machines,
loaded into car and wagon by ma
chinery, put into pressroom and on
presses by other machinery and finally
printed and folded without having been
directly touched by any human hand.
This is a mechanical marvel of to-
day which is no doubt duplicated in
other branches Of industry. 1t is very
striking In the newspaper industry,
which stands in the very front rank Of
mechanical perfection.-St> Louis Post
Dispatch
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
A Qualified Decision.

"In the early days Of CGur dAlene."
said an old miner, II was working
with my partners on claim when we
were suddenly startled by pistol shots
and, looking up, discovered man ly-
ing PROSTATE on an adjoining claim,
while his assailant was trying to es-
cape by Logging it to the best of his
ability. Without stopping to pick up
the injured man we gave hot chase to
the one trying to escape, whom we
finally overhauled, captured and hailed
before justice of the peace ut Mis-
sion, Ida, the nearby town.
There, as / remember it, it develop
ed that 1t was an attempt at claim
jumping and that the man who had
done the shooting was the would be
jumper The evidence was all against
him, and word came that the man who
had been shot lay all but within the
portals of death, the physician giving
1T as his opinion that he could last only
a few hours longer, and thereupon the
famed justice of the peace rendered his
decision.
Il find you guilty of murder in the
first degree said he severely as he
turned toward the prisoner at the bar
that is, provided the victim dies
and so that decision stands to this
dov"
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
The Nature of Ether.

If any reader is disposed to object to
the assumption of n medium behaving
in such very different ways with re-
gard to motions of different speeds, ii
may assist in convincing him that the
objection is not a valid one to direct
his attention to the similar behavior
of such a familiar substance as pitch.
In moderately cold weather this ma
terial has all the appearance of solid
and will resist n blow or momentary
heavy pressure. If, however, denser
body than the pitch, such as a bullet,
for example, be laid upon its surface,
II will gradually sink until it rests up
on whatever is supporting the pitch.
If on the other hand, the pitch is plac-
ed upon a less dense body, such as
cork, the latter Will float up through 1t
in the course of time. The pitch, there
fore, exposes great resistance to rapid
motion, but the smallest pressure
causes it to give way If sufficient time
is allowed.-Knowledg
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
A Chicago street Car Episode.

Passengers on an east bound Archer
avenue car were thrown into a panic
one night by the prospect Of holdup
At the sight of wild eyed man jerk
ing the bell rope and fiourishing huge
revolver timid women sought shelter
behind brave men.
Quiet was restored when the real
cause of the disturbance was learned
Car 1911 had been about TO cross the
switch tracks at Ashland avenue when
the conductor asked the man for his
fare. He took So bill and was about
to make change when he saw the
warning lights ahead.
"Wait n moment" he said and dart
ed ahead with his lantern.
"Stop the carr roared the excitable
passenger, who saw the conductor and
his So disappearing down the track.
Hes got my money!
The would be "holdup" man had
reached the front door when the car
flashed past the conductor, who was
waiting for the rear platform. The
passenger tried to jump from the car,
but found 1t impossible because of the
Archer avenue bridge structure. Then
he made mad dash for the rear door,
where the conductor met him with q
polite Don't forget your change, sir"
Chicago Record.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
The Growing Triumph
OF a Busy Professional Life Was
the Discovery of
Or. A. W. Chase's
Nerve and Blood pills,
The New Treatment Which Has Rev
olutionized the Old Method OF
Treat ng Diseases of the
BLOOD AND NERVES,

OF the private prescriptions OF DR..
A. w. Chase, none have had such
wide influence on the medical probes
sion as his last great discovery, Dr.
Chase's Nerve and Blood Pills.
For many years DIR. Chase's Ointment
and DIR. Chase's Kidney-Liver Pills have
been standard remedies, known and
used in nearly every home. DR.. Chase's
Nerve and Blood Pills have had greater
attention from physicians because they
have to a large extent revolutionized the
method of treating diseases of the nerves
and blood.
The old method of tearing down dis
ease by the use of strong, poisonous
drugs has failed to cure. Purgatives
and sarsaparillas weaken instead OF
strengthen the body. DIR. Chase's
Nerve and Blood Pills cure by making
the blood rich and pure, and creating
new nerve tissue. As spring restora-
tive this great food cure has no riva
known to medical science.
AS a restorative for pale, weak, nerv-
Gus men and women at any season OF
the year, Dr. Chase's Nerve and Blood
Pills have scored triumph. so cents a
box, at all dealers, or by mail on re-
ceipt of price by the DIR. A. w. Chase
Medicine Co., Buffalo, N. Y. On every
box of the genuine will be found por-
trait and fac-simile signature of DR.. A.
W. Chase.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
No Use For Toes.

If shoes go on forever, why should
not our toes grow together? We have
no use for them. We can't manage
them. About one man In 1000 can
pull on his interossei muscles and
spread out his toes. In the remaining
900 these muscles are as dead as fiber.
They haven't been used since the in
FAINT stuck his toes in his mouth and
crooned n baby song without words.
If we wore mittens all the time, the
individual control of our fingers would
be lost. We eat so much soft food
that we have scarcely any. need of
teeth. Gums would answer every pur-
pose, as mastication is performed by
machinery before we begin meal.
There are over 200 distinct muscles in
the human body, of which the best of
us keep about 100 in prime condition
by proper use.-New York Press.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

over score OF years ago Judge Fitx-
gerald was appointed to the bench Of
the district that includes Pima and
Cochise counties, In Arizona. He found
on coming to Tucson that formality
was almost unknown In the courtroom.
If the days were warm, the attorneys
and attendants dispensed with coats.
This to him appeared particularly dis
respectful. He announced that smok-
ing In the courtroom would not be toll
Grated and that coats must be worn
The grand jury was called. Among
the jurors summoned was n brawny
miner, who appeared In his usual cos
tune, dark blue shirt and overalls.
What do you mean." Numbered the
magistrate, "by appearing I'm this court
room In your shirt sleeves? Where Ia
your coatY
AT home, judge" mildly returned
the juror
Then go and get IL! No, not word.
sir!' glaring down upon the man as
he attempted to speak. go home and
get your coat, sir, or I'll commit you
for contemptv'
The miner went silently out. He
didn't return that day nor the next
and the judge, after issuing a bench
warrant for him, swore in another
juror. About two weeks thereafter the
original miner, dressed as the court de-
handed, again stepped within Judge
Fitzgerald's range of vision. To the
irate magistrate he rendered the ex-
both in Harshaw mountains, near the
Mexican border, over 100 miles away,
and that he had but obeyed the orders
of his honor In going home after his
coat.-Arizona Graphic.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
A Twelve Hour Dinner.

They dined well, if not wisely, in the
old days described by Sir Algernon
West in his 'Recollections." He says
Thanks to the introduction of smolx-
ing after dinner, wine drinking is now
over. What it was in old days ap.
pears most incredible. The late Lord
Clanwilliam told me of one occasion
when he had dined at n friends villa
near Putney. The dinner was extraor-
dinarily late for those days-at 8
o'clock.
"When they at last rose from the
table and went up to their rooms, Lord
Clanwilliam flung open his window
and saw the haymakers coming into
the field.
al wonder he thought, what hour
they begin work And on consulting
his watch he found 1t was S:30-the
haymakers were returning to work
from their breakfast" New York
World.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

Wishing TO make study Of por-
don of the swamp near El Akewa, In
Egypt, l set up my easel on the edge
OF pool where the ground seemed a
little frmer than the rest. Quickly
becoming engrossed In my work, did
not notice that | was slowly sinking
until | found that my sketching stool
had nearly disappeared and my legs
were imbedded in the mud almost up
to my knees. With the breaking of
the surface crust the black slime gave
out most horrible odors, and small
singing flies. liberated from the earth,
quickly covered me, crawling up my
legs and arms, while the mosquitoes,
combining in the attack, eventually
drove me from my half finished work
Though really quite clear, the water
was so alive with mosquito grubs as
TO appear almost Opaque. BY thou
sands every moment the grubs would
come TO the surface either crawling
up the rushes or floating, and the outer
shells soon cracking in the sun left the
little insects at liberty. A few sec
onds sulliced to dry their wings and
give them life and strength, and then
with hum and buzz they Joined their
brothers in the air. lowering I'm thou
sands like a cloud Of black smoke over
the stagnant pond from which they
sprang. Then | was discovered-a rare
bonnie bouche for those parts-and n
rapid retreat became imperative.-R.
Talbot Kelly in Century.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
Mr.. BickerIey's Method.

81 have here a complete and concise
history of our war In the
Exactly, exactly" hurriedly inter.
rupted Mr.. Bickerley. "Just what
have been looking for. What beau.
tiful edition.! BY the way, don't for.
get to go around and see my wife. She
wishes one, you know. Never mind
the price. Here's so, and you can
keep the change"
The book agent had fallen helpless
against the desk The surprise was
too much.
"Here, boyp called Mr.. Bickerley.
Help me carry this fellow out. That's
the way to fix ZEN" -Indianapolis Sun.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

kou can, with l.it.Hnvc, teach your
horse politeness-to bow To an audi
ence, to say mo" with more or less
decision, to kiss you or even laugh.
fhe animal may be taught to bow by
tapping him OIL the back with a whip.
lie bends his head in trying TO avoid
the annoyance The trainer ceases the
tapping, careSscs him, then resumes
II till he repcats the bow. He is again
caressed ar. presented with a carrot
or something of which he Is particular
ly fond At last it comes about that
he slows" upon any movement of the
whip toward his back.
To teach horse TO say mo" a pin
is fastened to the butt of the whip. A
slight scratch is given to the horses
withers, about where the collar would
be. At this he shakes his head and
soon learns to shake II whenever he
sees the butt Of the whip coming near
his withers.
The trainer teaches the animal ito
kiss" by feeding him with apples from
his mouth, gradually lessening the size
OF the apples till the horse does the
trick without any, or he puts salt, or
which horses are very fond, on his
cheek, and the animal naturally Hicks
II off.
He is taught to laugh by gently fore
ing the butt of the whip in at the side
of his mouth, then prying his mouth
open with 1t. Caresses and carrots fol
low, till Mt last the slightest motion Of
the butt toward his mouth makes him
open 1t. He does not really laugh; he
grins.-Good Words.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
The Polite Professor.

The palm for observation-disclosures
should be accorded to n learned Ger
man professor. One day he noticed his
wife placing bunch of flowers on his
desk. what do they meanT he
asked.
why" she exclaimed, don't you
know that this Is the anniversary of
your marriageT
"Ah, indeed, is it?' said the professor
politely. KINDLY let me know when
yours comes around, and l will return
your attention in kind."-Collier's
Weekly.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

mo-" said the practical politician,
eve don't want him figuring in the
campaign"
But he is exceedingly well inform
ed"
81 doubt it. He has put In all his
time studying the tariff and finance
and the United States constitution. He
doesn't know anything about politics."
Washington Star.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
Speeding the Parting Guest.

as that clock rightT he asked after
1t had struck IL.
"Whyw she answered.
Because IL 1t is l shall have plenty
of time to catch the 11:30 car"
81 remember now" she said, "that
the clock is about 20 minutes slow.
II you hurry, you will just catch the
car"
During the 20 minutes that he stood
on the corner he arrived at the painful
conclusion that she didn't really love
him as he longed to be loved Chicago
Times Herald.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
One or the Other.

doctor, what ails my daughterT
Before | answer that question LET
me ask IL you have reason to think
she has had love disappointment OF
any kindr
81 know she has not"
"Then, madam, your daughter has
the grip. Chicago Tribune.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
Upsettinr ArithmeticaI Tradition

Jack-How did you come out on that
bulldog pup you bought?
Dick-Lost over 100 per cent on the
transaction.
Jack-Oh, / guess not! A hundred
per cent is all you can possibly lose.
Dick-Think so, do you? Well,
paid so for the pup, and then l had
to give boy 81 to take him out and
drown him. If that isn't 10 per cent
loss, I'd like to know what you call It.
New York Sun.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
Hawaiian RECOMMENDATIONS.

Hawaians call their chief islands
Hah-vwy-ee; we say Hah-wy-ee. 9th
er proper ways of giving we'll known
Hawaiian names are: O-ah-hu, Homo
lulu, Novice (MauD, Kow-aye QKauaD.
Ne-e-how (NiihaW, Hee-lo CHilo), La
hy-na Oahaina), Ko-hah-la (Kohala).
Vowels are as in Italian and deserve
much care. Hnwaiians pay little at
tention to consonants. - Baltimore
News
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

Gratitude is nice touch of beauty
added last Of all to the countenance,
giving a classic beauty. an angelic
lovellncss to the character.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

An orange hit in the exact center by
rifle ball will vanish at once from
sight, scattered Into infinitesimal
pieces
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

No soul is desolate as long as there
is a human being for whom IL can feel
trust and reverence.-George Eliot.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
Pains in the Back.

A. b. Harrington, COHstantia N. Y,
says: 81 was troubled several years
with kidney disease and suffered severe
pains in the back. / used Foley's Kid
Dey Cure and one bottle cured me. I
IL to my friends IL has
given perfect satisfaction"
w. l. Benedict.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

The golden moments in the stream OF
life, says George Eliot, rush past us.
and we see nothing but sand.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
THE BRADFIELD REGULATOR co.
ATLANTA. GA.
PacaI Balm Cured Them.

J Here's what they write: "Catarrh cured"
Smell and Hearing restored;" "Soroiula Eyellds
twenty years cured;" Cures Asthma Coughs
Group, Quinsy, Bronchitis, Old and Syphilitit
Sores, Burns, Scalp and Skin Diseases Best loot
ease known. Used internally and externally
Free sample from druggists. Price 7s cts. pre-
paid Pacal Balm CO.. St. Louis Mich.
Sold by Fisk Bangs, Beldin0.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17
The Hest md Most Honey.

The finest honey in this country is
gathered from hives where white clio
yer and Eastwood are accessible. In
quantity, however. II falls behind that
made from the goldenrod and buck
wheat blossom. From New York,
Pennsylvania and Vermont comes the
most of the comb honey and from Ari-
zona and California the largest amount
OF extracted or liquid honey.
Belding banner. (Belding, Mich.) 1889-1918, 1900-05-17

Society is like any other kind OF
work, and the people who centre their
whole lives on IL, must be leaders.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1900-09-21
Anti-cigarette Law.

Having noticed for some time the grow.
ing evil of the tobacco habit among small
boys of our town, and hearing great
deal of the way said tobacco is purchased,
the w. c. T. U. decided dealers in tobacco
must be ignorant of the law in reference
to the sale of the same, and others moi
dealers must need reminder of Their
violations of law. A copy of the Maryland
Law in reference to this matter is found
below, in the hope that word to the
wise will be sufficient.
ARTICLE "a las. 1t shall not be lawful for any
dealer, vendor, OF other person or body corporate
engaged in the manufacture Of cigars. cigarettes
or tobacco, or in any occupation in which the
buying of said goods, wares and merchandise
shai constitute the whole or any part of his, her
its or their occupation 10 SELL barter or give any
cgar or cigars cigarette or cigarettes smoking OF
chewing tobacco to any minor under the age OF
fifteen years, unless previously authorized In
writing by the parent or guardian Of snch minor,
or unless such minor Is acting solely as the agent
OF bis employer, nor shall 1t be lawful for any
person not a dealer, TO purchase for any minor
any cigar OF cigars cigarette or cigarettes. smok-
log or chewing tobacco.
The violation of the preceding section incurs a
fine of not less than $40 nor more than 500 or
Imprisoned in Jail for not less than FIVE nor more
thar thirty days in default of payment.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1900-09-21

We are in receipt of little work whose
title is the above, by T. w. Wood, pub
lished by the Wood Publishing Co., Rich
mond, Va. Price post paid, 20 cents.
This is an up to date little work and con-
tains more valuable information, which
every voter ought to possess, in the most
condensed form, that has fallen into our
hands, and we have read most of the
recent publications on moHientous issues
that are just now agitating the public
mind.
The following are few Of the subheads
to. short chapters which serve to convey
an idea of the work: Prosperity is Gre
ated by plenty of money" Establish
ing gold standard has always proved
baneful."
The chapter on the free coinage Of sill
yer is very plain and fair presentation
of the whole subject.
The chapter on paper money is equally
clear and instructive, giving history Of
the greenbacks and national debt which
was created by hocus pocus methods.
1.-THE cause of financial panics.n This
chapter gives history of all the great
financial panics in this country since 1887
when the first great panic occurred.
The chapter on Imperialism is most
complete.
The little book is worth many times its
cost to any one who desires accurate in.
formation on these momentous questions.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1900-09-21

An article in the Kansas City Journal
Of Aug. rs, mckinley organ) tells some
interesting facts about the Philippines.
After stating that the islands do foreign
business of over thirty millions year, it
says that ''about the only thing being
imported from America is beer. This was
brought to Manila by the ship load as
soon as the Americans took possession OF
the country. There are now a hundred
saloons where there was one before. -
This is republican evidence of how to
civilize and Christianize the country
The writer says that the duty collected on
imports that the people need are eight
million dollars year at the Manila port
alonel This money is spent for salary to
public officials. friends of the administra-
tion here! They of course favor an i'm
periai, colonial government just as do the
British Office holders who collect and
spend the millions wrung from the starv-
ing of India. It is this tax on the Philip
pines that will help them make living
The writer says that the custom houses
restrict trade and that great land conces-
sions and monopolies are farnied out by
the government? Which shows how this
government wishes to protect the people
from monopolies. And the eagle screams!
Appeal to Reason.
The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1900-09-21
How,s This 2

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward
for any case of catarrh that cannot be
cured by Halls Catarrh Cure.
F. ]. CHENEY & Co., Toledo. o.
We. the undersigned, have known F.
]. Cheney for the last I6 years, and believe
him perfectly honorable in all business
transactions, and financially able to carry
out any obligation made by their firm.
WEST & TRUAx,
Wholesale Druggists, Toledo. O.
WALDING, KINNAN & MARVIN,
Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, O.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally,
acting directly upon the blood and mu-
cous surfaces of the system. Testimonials
free.
Sold by druggists, 7sc.
Halls Family Pills are the best