Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1900-10-17


1 should be happier If it were Dead
Don't be cruel" said Jane, "I
wouldnT have "a hair of its head harm
ed for anything in the world
PARROTS, said Whiffleby, with con-
scieus pride in his knowledge, don't
have hair. They call it feathers. But
somehow 1 feel uneasy about that bird.
feel vague presentiment of i'm
pending doom, a premon1tory unrest
and dim disquFet."
In few minutes horrible uproar
was heard from the kitchen. Shrieks
and cries, Kisses and yowls and ex-
plosive Gaelic explosives resounded.
"The cat" said WhiffIeby solemnly,
"has found the bird. 1 suppose it es-
capped from the closet when / got out
my smoking jacket
eff anything happens to that bird:"
cried Jane, clasping her hands like the
heroine In melo',slna.
The kitchen door slammed and a
sturdy step sounded in the hall. In
an instant Maggie appeared, her face
shining like an angry sun.
"Yez kin give me tn mooney that's
due me-" she shouted, SER I'll not be
afther stayin' here another mint, with
burrds and cats fighting all over the
place. I'll be the kayper Of no men
agerfe!" And she founced into her
own room to pack up, banging the
door behind her.
'Puss SIS you mieouw-you will, will
you?-scat-tem-rrr! came steadhl y
from the Kitchen. Whiffleby could
hear the shutters crashing open n
Pats all about him, aud coul', imagine
the heads of aLgcy neighbors poke d
menacingly out OF windows. A baby
began to wall across the shaft. 1t was
evident that som -thing mus. he 'it ne
or the janitor would Inc nD)n them.
Jane, as the women nov rs saw, was
gradually being reduced TO tears.
Whiffleby sat there stiff and strai ght
In his chair, the clear hight of heron
resolve in his eyes.
"I viii go to the scene OF action"
he cried impressively. II will pour
oil ON the troubled waters
''Get your old crab net to separate
them" cried Jane family. "And be
sure to save the parrot"
Whiffbeby murmured something that
sounded hike ISLAM the parrot" He
got the crab net and carefully opened
the kitchen door. The floor before
him was strewn with vegetables, pots
and pans, a steak partly cooked,
sprawIed upon the wInd)v sill. IL
one corner, bleeding, his fur badly
torn and lacerated, Lay the kitten
very still; and aioft On its perch, its
chain broken, but not fe lther ruff.
fed, sat the parrot, triumphant. as
Whiffleby entered, it murnured soft
ly:
81 don't do nothin, to nobody what
don't do nothim, to me-"
WELL" said Whdffleby, "IE be -.
Then he looked from his wrecked
dinner to the kitten and back to the
scattered fragmente of his meal again
He raised the crab net, suddenly
brought 1t down over the parrot.
head, rushed with it to thewindow ant
turned the met upside down. TIL,
bird tapping its wings dropped noisily
to the yard below. Whffleby quiet
| ly closed the window and returned tt
the dining room.
"Was the parrot dead?" said Jane
I'm quivering voice.
at wasn't, but 1 still hope for tn,
W. st" replied Whlffleby.
'sMrS. Smithers will never forgiv,
me for letting the kitten get alt it,
said Jane.
''The kitten didn't hurt it." SAFE
Whiffleby, "but on the contrary,
didn't do a thing TO the kitten"
| There was a pause. Then Jan
cried suddenly: Jonathan Whitfield,
what did you do to that parrots?
| "There are times" returned Whit
fleby, deliberately, "when bird in tn
| yard is worth two in the fiat. l sim
| ply dropped it out of the window
"Oh! OIL" cried Jane. What shall
say to Mrs. Smithers?"
''Mrs. Smithers,'' retorted WHITLEY
"1 she knows a good thing, will neve
return. Meanwhile you had better e1
pend your breath in attempting
| persuade Maggie TO remain with u,
And now, as our dinner has been, Xix
the Fflipinos, badly demoraAized AN
scattered. 1T lis well for us to HE to ON
OF our Harlem table d'hotes, wher
they serve German cooking in Frenc
quantities at American prices"
And as they left the room a nasa
voice flOated up from the yard, chant
ing fafntly: IA
81 don't want Ito play IN your yard.
New York Sun.