davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25
HUMOROUS.

"Ilow like his father
The baby isi" Mother--"IIe's certain
" like him In some way. lie generally
keeps me up half the nighti"- Punch.
Old Lady (sternly)--'1s there bar
attached to this hotel, young man?"
summer Hotel Clerk-"No, ma'am;
but we can send out and get anything
you want"-Philadelphia Press.
Firs, Tramp-"wby don't you go
In? E's all right. Don't you src I'm
a-w aggin' his iail?" Second Tramp
"yus; an don't you see i'm a-growlin'?
] dunno which end Ia bclisvc!"--
Punch.
Mr.. Sappcigh--~I won't marry that
Miss Gabby. she ~ terribly set in her
ways" Mr.. softleigh-"Is that soY'
Mr.. Softeigh-"Yes, indeed. why, she
has refused me nine times Bnlii-
more American.
Tom" The ichncumon ny'-ihat ls
new one OF me-" Jerry--"You Will
find Il tcscribcd IN any textbook on
insects" Tom "Ncs; but the paper
says that II borcs into old woods and
barks!"-Jrown Topics.
Johnny White--"Did yer ole man
make a holler when hc found that you
had been smoking cigars?" Billy Black
--"You bet he did" "What did hc
sayar "Dihn't have 10 LAY nothin',
lie got the hollcr ont % me- Detroit
News.
First Camper ''lIcrc. what's become
of all our whisky" Second Camper
"ryc drunk H." First Camper--"Why
lid YOU DO that?- Second, Camper
"IIad to, old chap. was writing home
telling the folks what u good time
we're Boston Courier.
In the very vortex OF the bargain rusi
a man was struggling. Mercy" h'
shrieked. hut the women bore hin
down and trnmpled him under foot
"Thc nerve of him" sneercd they. on'
to another, "to wear IA shirt waist an'
then ask special consideration b,
reason of his sex!"--Dctroit Journal.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

The following letter was Addressed TO the
Sar Department by a coiored citizen Of
Georgia recently: "Mis,er Warbler Sur;
I wuz thinkin' bout j'inin' de army, en-
write dis ter let you know bout IT,. What
does YOU low fer a right or lcf arm shot OIL ?
What does you give fer de shootin,, OIL er
one legy I'm. 'sgosc lost my head by run.
min 'rin A bumshcll; what would ! git fer
dats I a po' man wild one wife dat aint
able ter make Twin fer me; cn ] wants
ter git on dc pension hst. DO, a you please,
mh, gimme a chance ter git shoot UP, en-
I'll vote fer you wen you runs crgin! -
Chicago Chronicle.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25
what re Knew Of Them.

An old Dominican frinr, who had
served his church for 40 years In
the Philippines, was asked by his fe;.
lows to write II book describing the
characteristics, habits and customs
OF the Filipino people. TO this he
agreed, with the proviso that no one
should see his work until after his
death. When he died In Mnniln this
year the book was found among his
effects. On the first page wns the
title and all the ether 300 pages were
blank except the last, ON which was
written. "This is all know. after
40 years study Of the Filipino peo-
Chicago Record.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

A man who had never seen the inside Of
witness In q case pending In one. Of tho
Scottish courts. on. being sworn, took posi-.
tion with his back Ia. the jury and began
telling his story to the Judge. The judge. In
q bland and courteous manner, said, nd
dress yourself to the jury, air" The man
made a short pause, but, notwithstanding
narrative. The judge was then more cS.
plicit, and said TO him; Speak TO the jury.
sir; the men sitting behind you on the
bencher." The witness at once turned
around. and. making an awkward bow, said
with perfect CAVITY: Good morning, gen
tlemcn Buffalo Courier.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

Business Opportnnities on the line Of the
Chicago Great Western l'y in Illinois. Iowa.
Minnesota and Missouri. First e. ass open.
ness and for manufacturing dur list in.
cludcs locations for Backsmiths. Doctors.
Drt.smakcrs. Furniture. Grain and Live
Stock BUYERS. General Merchandise, Hard.
ware, Harness, Tailors, Gold Storage.
Creamrrics and Canning Factories. Write
fully in regard to your requirements 81 that
We may advise, YOU n'eligcn,ly: Address
COL Endicott Big. st. Paul. MINI.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25
whs, WIN necom. Of China,

None can forcscc the outcome Of the quar-.
rel between foreign powers over the divl-
sion Of China. IL II Interesting TO watch
the going to pieccs OF this ancient but un.
progressive race. Many people in America
are also going to pieces because Of dyspep.
sia, constipation, blood, liver and stomach
diseases. We are living too fast. but
strength. viyor and good health can be re-
tanned u we keep off and cure the above die
eases with Hostetters Stomach Bitters.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25
RISE ABOVE Ir.


wlsstsocvr ~ befaIi
Learn To rise above Il all:
Hear the voice Of duty call;
Join your comrades IN the strife.
Though the shaft OF sorrows dart
Rankies IN your bleeding heart
Hide your grief, and do your part.
This is life.
why become u slave 10 chance?
Why he crushed by circumstanceI
Rise above u, ana advance
Over all adversely.
You're king. and can create
For yourself your own estate.
You are master nj your fate.
You are free.
An Of this II ancient lore.
Often has been said before
Hut I'd tell II DER and DER.
Sing u to- the heart NJ youth
flowsocver long It's told,
Ills "A lesson never old.
For II bears thread of gold
n is truth.
Rise above the petty things
That would bind your spirit wings:
Hear the inner voice that sings
Songs Of beauty all the while.
Drive the demon NJ Despair
From your heart: and. free and fair,
Meet the broods of grief and care
With q smile.
circumstances make us not
Life is substance To be wrought
In the workshop NJ our thought;
We can mold u as we Will.
All the hardships that affright.
~ we brave them. take their night.
They are tests TO try our might
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25
best for the nowcis.

No matter what ails you, headache To u
cancer, you will never get well until your
bowels are put right. Cascarcts help nature,
cure you without u gripe or pain. produc.
easy natural movements. cost you just ~
cents to start getting your health back.
Cascarcts Candy Catbart!c, the genuine, pu,
up in metal boxes. every tablet has 4. 4. T.
Stamped on IL. Beware of limitations.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25
tn. B~.t lie CouIa no.

"l,end that TO me, will you?" said
Mrs. sterlingworth to her husband as
she handed hIma fragment of q Hebrew
newspaper.
81 cant read H." replied Mr.. Sterling
worth; shut II you'Il walt until I get
my auis Ill play Il for you."-JHdgs.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

lie thrust the sealed letter through the
window and put down two cents.
We'll, what do you want:' asked the
stamp clerk gruiiy.
AN automobile, please" he replied.
swee,ly Philadelphia North American.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

Young Lady--Giyc me one yard why,
haven't I see you before!
Dry Goods Clcrk-Oh, Maud, can you
have forgotten mt! saved your lie at the
seaside last summer.
Young Lady twarmly)--Why. OF course
you did! You may give me. two yards oi
this ribbon, please. c.--lioston journal.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

The Ph.iadc,phian-."Isn't the mud on
this street a triile deep!" Chicagoan tproud.
lyJ--"Decpg II H. the deepest mud on any
paved street in the worli!"-lndianapolis
Press.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

Tixby-"Your father must he a humor.
ist." Mira. Bixby-"What do you mtany"
Bixby.-"When asked him Tor you, he said:
Take her and be happy. Town Topics.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

] am sure Pi-o's Cure for Consumption
,aved my life three years aao.--Mrs. Thos.
Robbins, Maple Street, Norwich. y. y,
Feb H. 1000
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

No man proposes to remain single. When
he proposes he experts to get married.
Philadelphia Record.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

You cannot he cheerful IL you have dys.
peJ~ia. You won't have dysp~psia II you
chow Whites Yucatan."
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

II We were half as anxious a. we try TO
plish twice IA much A. we do Rams Horn
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

The Blu,st Blue makes the whi,cst whit. :,
that's Rcd Cross Hall Biue. Refuse init '.
| ttnus
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

To Cure y Cold In one Day
Take Laxative Bruno t,uipinc Tablets. An
druggists ciund mOuey II itiails 70 cure. o5c
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25
The nss, Prescription for chii,s

and Fever is u bottle OF GpovE's T,sTrLrss
CnIihToSic. tits simply iron and gninine In
atistrlcss form. Nocurc no pay Price, ,iur.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

She says least who talks st.-Chicago
Daily News,
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

PrrxAN FApELEss Drrs produce the fast
est and brightest colors Of any known dye
stun. Sold by all druggists.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

disappearing and exagserating are
simple ~ lying.-Atchison Globe.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

Red Cross Hall Dlue makes clothes whittier
than snow. Large 2. or. package only ) cents,
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

One Of the peculiari,es of the obstinate
man is his inclination to marvel at what he
regards his own yielding natufe.-Washing.
ton Post.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

gorgeous costume flashed beneath the brilliant lights
Of bah The queen of society Ii radiant tonight
The nervous hands of q weak woman have toiled day
and night the weary and aching head have known no
rest for the dress must be finished in time.
To queen Of society ard her dressmaker would
say Q word One through hothouse culture, luxury and
social excitement and the other through the toll Of necessity
may some day find their ailments q common cause
Nervous prostraou excitabiy. faintng spells, diszi
seepessness loss of appetite and strength all indicate
serious trouble which has been promoted By overaxsd
system.
For the society queen and the dressmaker alike there h
nothing reliable as Lydia e. Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound to restore strength vigor, and happneea
Mrs. Lizzie Anderson - Unioa S.. Salem. n. J writes;
feel write and tall how
what medicine has done for
suffered everything could had iansmmsoo q e
falling and eucorhaa AZ times could NOT hold
Vegetable Compound helped
using six bottles well
work also ride wheel and feel bod sc fro
= curing suffering women. recommend y0ar nd
]; ! : J ! ; J
icnc 10 troablcd with any o9 thsss
d diseases"
II \ II Mrs Sarah swsdsr. i0s Wsst s..
In Porte. lnt. wratsss
"DRAn Nina PmERAx.-N gvss great
- ~ II fiskkam's vsgstshis had n
u II had eecn . sufferer for year. With feIss n
III III time without suffering terribly with ny head
II III Ny back and Kidneys also troubled M Ill the
III time was advised by friend 10 take nd
USIXH Aftes taking bottle felt much betor tAat
N&XNEXX continued and by tho time had taken
six bottles cured There other medne
T. Su~ me. recommend II 10 al nv frsndA"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1900-10-25

Halls Catarrh Cure
T. taken internal.y. Price. 75c.
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
MAIDENS WILL SAW WOOD.
A New Scheme for Raising Funds
for the Church.

Trenton, N. j., August 27.-Sev-
eral young and pretty women, MEM
berS of the Grace Methodist EpiSco-
pal Church at Crosswicks a small
hamlet near this city, will saw wood
for a prize at church festival to be
given in few days. The church
treasury needs replenishing, and the
trustees were at a loss to find some
scheme that would draw a crowd to
the festival They were opposed to
wheels of fortune and lottery schemes.
What they wanted was something
new, but the trustees were, about
giving up in despair when one of the
pretty girl members of the congrega-
tion suggested that a wood saving
contest be held. The idea was taken
up instantly.
The contest is to be held next
Thursday night, on the church lawn,
inside an inclosure, to which an ad-
mission fee is to be charged. The
young men of the surrounding coun-
try are taking great interest in the
affair.
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
DEATH OF CAPT. CARTON.
Estimable Gentleman Died Mon
day Morning.

Captain Joseph Carton, who for
years has lived on North Pearl street.
died Monday after an illness of
considerable lentgh. He was one of
Bridgeton's best citizens, and al
though his life was transformations yet
he was probably not widely known.
AS boy he spent his entire time
with his father who was in the
coasting trade, and grew up to follow
the life of sea-faring man. All his
life he enjoyed the distinction of be-
ing one of the best pilots On the Del
ware river and Atlantic coast, and
he was entrusted with the most i'm
portant missions.
For. long while he commanded
the sea going tug America. While
on the Mississippi and other South
ern rivers, Captain Carton was in
command of the tug Philip
During the war Capt. Garton..was
in the Government service and COM
manded the steamer Kennebec,"
one of the most important vessels in
the transport service.
Capt. Carton was quiet, affable,
courteous gentleman, and kept from
public notice as much as possible.
He was man of fine feelings, and
when ashore enjoyed nothing as
much as his home life. He was a
most fair man, and never had anyone
to criticize his life action. He was
member of the First Presbyterian
Church, this city, and always a con-
siStent Christian.
Two children survive him, Henry
Carton, Jersey City, and Mrs. Ezbon
G. Lambert, of Bridgeton The
funeral services will occur on Wednes-
day.
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
NEW OFFICIALS
FOR MALAGA CAMP.
Thunderstorm and Heat Were
There Sunday.

Malaga, Aug. pa heavy thun-
derstorm accompanied--b --by high winds
visited this place this afternoon
while the song service was in progress
and the auditorium was crowded with
people, who replied to the thunder of
the elements with singing hymns.
The heat this morning was intense,
and a number of horses were pros
trated by it. The storm cooled the
atmosphere very perceptibly. The
sermon this morning was preached to
a big crowu by w. S. Mitchell, of
Swedesboro, whose discourse was pro-
nounced one of the best heard here
this year, the theme being: 1.-THE
Kingdom of God Among Men," and
his text, Luke II, 21: "The King
dom of God is Within You" Rev.
Mr.. Mitchell traced the analogy be-
tween kingdoms of the world and
kingdoms of God, and urged his
hearers to keep up the Spiritual war
fare against the enemies to the Chris
t1an Church. Presiding Elder Graw
preached in the afternoon on "Chris
tian Activity" while the evening
sermon was delivered by Rev. J. B.
Whitten.
At the annual meeting of the Grove
Association yesterday, Rev. Charles
+. Downs was elected President, re-
ceiving 35 votes to "a cast for Rev.
Alfred Wagg. Rev. d. B. Ackley
was reelected Vice President; Frank
Downs, Secretary, and-James Potter,
Treasurer, while the following Direc-
tors were unanimously elected: Rev.
J. 0. R. Corilss, hev. George Went
zell, William Leach, Alfred Howes,
A Richman, f. Dougherty, James
Bates, Edmund Garrison, Lorenzo
Adams an Frank Simkpins.
The affairs of the association are
in an excellent condition, and every
thing presages progress next year.
Get your printing at this Office.
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
PEOPLE WANT
TROLLEY EXTENSION,
Down in the Lower Part of the
County.


There will be a demand for the
trolley road to be extended through
the lower part of the county, and it
will be one to attract the attention
of the company
Ever since the trolley plant passed
into the hands of the American
Railways Company, people from the
lower part Of the county have been
petitioning the officers of the com
pany to make extensions to the lower
part of the county, down as far as
Port Norris or Bivalve.
The answer of the company has not
been encouraging to the petitioners.
The officials said they were anxious
to treat with the people fairly, but
at that time the price of rails was
prohibtive, and the new administra-
tlon was anxious to get grasp upoh
the situation as it existed, before fur
ther extension was made.
The people down there have been
patient, and now it has been decided
to make an important and decisive
appeal to the big corporation. The
steel markets show that the price has
declined considerably and now the
company should be fully acquainted
with the affairs of this section.
The people are circulating petitions
all through the lower part of the
county. These petitions are being
eagerly signed by the people and
when the papers are placed in the
hands of the officials of the company
it will be found that practically all
of the representative men and prop
erty holders in Lawrence, Downe
and Commercial townships have
added their names.
These petitioners have been in cir
culation but a day or two and they
have been signed already by many
people.
What the people want down there
is to have the trolley road extended
from the present terminus at Cedar
vile, on through Newport, down and
through Dividing Creek, to Port
Norris and down to the wharves at
Bivalve.
What the Company will say in an
swer to these petitions is matter of
conjecture. The American Railways
Company is progressive, modern
corporation. The company are not
afraid to invest money and the policy
OF the company is to give the pc ople
as nearly what they want as is possi-
BILE.
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
THESE FELLOWS
TOOK CHARGE OF THINGS
Broke In a House and Carried ON
Some.

Mayor Hampton Sunday night COM
mitted to jail Frank Brennan, Frank
Moore and Henry Stokes. They are
charged with breaking and entering
the house of Hannah Riley, over on
Atlantic street.
According to the story of Mrs.
Griner these men must be a trio Of
pretty birds. Late Friday night, she
says, they came to her house with
some women and demanded admit
tance which she refused. They then
forcibly entered the place and took
charge of the house, and what was
done there was a plenty. She
screamed murder and help came and
the crowd busted out. Sunday night
the fellows were arrested by officers
Woodruff and Betchner and were
locked up for hearing.
Monday the three men were
taken before Mayor Hampton and
charged with drunkenness. They were
each fined S4.25. They settled.
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
THIS STORM DID
MUCH DAMAGE.
The Lightning Struck in Several
Places.

The storm Sunday night was fierce
one and did considerable damage.
The thunder storm seemed to have
started from the north, split and fin
ally came together with considerable
violence.
The thunuer and lightning were
very heavy, and the rain came down
in torrents being little less than a
flood. The storm ragged with fury
for more than an hour.
The lightning for a time was
frightful. The house of William o.
Garrison, No. 319 North Laurel
street, was struck. The bolt struck
the chimney, wrecking that and then
passed into the roof. There it seemed
to split, tearing down the chimney,
while the other followed a heavy
timber jumping into a middle bed
room through the ceiling a window
sill was torn loose, net was splin-
tered, and the bolt proceeded down
into the first story between the walls
and weather boarding. and made it's
way out of the house near side step.
The bolt that followed the chimney
down into the house tore the chin
ney caps out, covering the furnish
ingS of the up and down stairs rooms
with SCOT. Mr.. and Mrs. Garrison
were in the house, but fortunately
did not feel the effects of the light
ming.
A new double house out near the
Irving avenue stations in course of
construction for Joseph A. Woodruff
and s. A. Laning was struck and
some damage done the building, but
fortunately the place was not fired.
Two of the big poles out on the
Millville pike we're struck and they
were split right down the centre,
pieces of the poles being dashed away
across the roadway into adjoining
fields. Several trees about town
were struck, one on North Pearl
street having the entire top torn out.
The Traction Company suffered
considerable damage, four of it's cars
being burned out by the lightning.
One of the Millville cars was caught
,and had to be towed in. The other
three were here in town.
The rain interfered somewhat with
the work of paving over on Broad
street, the water washing the sand
that had just been graded in for the
asphalt. So far as known nobody was
hurt by the lightning effects.
The fire box at the corner of Pearl
and Penn streets was burned out dur
ing the shower, the lightning caus-
ing loud report to be heard at the
time. Several telephone wires on
North Pearl street were also dam
aged by the lightning.
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
TAKEN HOME.
The Unfortunate Hungarian Gone
TO ROSenhayn.

Tuesday afternoon County Physi-
clan h. l.. Diament made an investi-
CATION of the condition of the Hun
garian woman, Kate Barosky, who
was in Jail. He found her passive
and apparently recovered from her
mental trouble, and pronounced her
able to be removed to her home.
Late in the afternoon, the man
with whom she lived in Rosenhayn,
came in town with some clothing for
the woman. She made herself pre-
sentable, and was glad to enter the
carriage and be uriven back to the
home which she left last Saturday in
a sensational manner.
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
Must Label Tt.

Following in the footsteps of the
Pennsylvania Board of Health, New
York importers are after the Eiffel
Tower Lemonade people. An inSpec-
tor of the Fruit Importers ASsocia-
tion of New York had the representa-
tive of the Eiffel company hailed to
court Tuesday, charging him with
selling what purported to be 'slemon-
ade,' that is made drink, from the
juice of the lemon, but which, it is
claimed, is a chemical compound, and
containing only very small percent
age of oil of lemon.
Eiffel Tower Lemonade was inro-
duced into this country from England
this year with great "fiourish of
trumpets, the distributors advertis-
ing it far and wide as being the
product of Messina lemons. "no less
than $1,000, 900 being consumed every
year in its manufacture.
The prosecution said it had no de-
sire to prevent the sale of the COM
pound, but wanted it labeled in such
a manner as not to mislead the pub
lie.
The Eiffel company, as stated last
week, has agreed to put the word
artificial on all it's products sold
in Pennsylvania, and it is evident
this is what the New York parties
who instigated the investigation de-
sire.
Professor Brennerman testified that
he analyzed the contents of one of
the packagec handed him and found
the component parts to be as follows:
-Crystalized tartaric acid. ......... As. Is
Cane sugar. ........................ AZ. so
Iii OF lemons ."........................ $50
Nater "...".."......""....... 2.15
Bridgeton pioneer. (Bridgeton, N.J.) 1884-1919, 1900-08-30
BARN BURNED.
Lightning Does Damage at Di-
viding Creek.

Sunday night a terrible electrical
storm swept over Dividing Greek, do
ing considerable damage. A barn be-
longing to Daniel Campbell was struck
and fired, and the entire building was
destroyed. Only the hardest kind of
work upon the part of an organized
bucket brigade saved the residence
and other buildings. A COW was in
stantly killed in the barn, while an
other COW and horse, were saved.