The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1900-09-28

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Agreed cheerfuIly. The Mistress
Bridget. you must stay until get an
other girl Bridget-That was my IN
tenshun. any way. ! want TO know the
koind ov = woman re areT'-Bazar-
Financial Tommy: Ma-Tsmmys
you seem to love pa better than you do
me. TOmmy-Oh. ma, I don't mean
70; but ye' see. pa alIus has his pockets
full o aickels.-Indianapo Journal
School Teacher-What little boy can
tell me where Is the home or the swai-
love- Bobby kin. please School
Teaeher-Wem. Bobby Bobby-Ths
home Of the swallow is the stummick-
-Tit-Bits.
Highly COl0Fed: Iady-YOu have
been drinking run. Sandy Pikes-NOt
a drop, mum Lady-But how did your
nose get so red? sandy Pikes-From
+ drinking circus lemonade. mum--Chi-
( cagO News
/ Adjoining the Nursery: Mr. BriektOP
( CwhO has hit his thumb with q hammer
-! -. -.!. Mrs. BricktOp-
John! Remember the children. II you
must Use such language. why don you
SPELL it?'-Town Topics.
Il nebber could un'stan'." said Uncle
Eben. why it IS dat I hnds 50 much
mo- satisfaction in marchin' fob miles.
hollerin' 'hurrah. dan I does walking
few furlongs benin a mule. sayin'
'giddep. Washington star.
DO you 90 away this summer. Mrs.
Woodsg' ~Oh. yes; we spend two
weeks in Michigan with my people. and
two weeks in Ohio with my husbands
people, then we come home and let
them visit indianapolis Journal
Smith-If there is anything dislike
, It IS a shallow man Jones-Yes, but
! there is one thing in his favor. smith
r I'd ike TO know what it is Jones'
: shallow man doesn't require as much
: watching as a deep one.-ChicagO
= News.
p In England they say man stands
a for office In this country We say
q man runs for office. Why is JhisS
D Well. the principal reason is that If A
T man stood for office over here he'd
d never get one."-ChicagO Times-Her-
+ aid
It Wife-Oh. John. l was shopping At
J. Joblotz to-day, and I saw just the
Il sweetest thing there" Husband
D. Cdiplomaticallyl-Yes. That's a great
p scheme OF JObIotz 10 have mirrors
II all through the st0re.-Philadelphia
Press.
Tried to Obey Papa-Aha, You have
disobeyed me. WILLIE tried not To.
= Il isn't my fault Papa-NOt your fault
y ehf Willie-NO. sir. You said. Don {
let me catch you at that again" az
: done my best not 10 let you.-Philadel-
: phia Press.
- Early Ambition. ~Oh. NAH good
a ness exclaimed little Abe Lincoln
10 snow. Il wisht WIZ laik de little boy
ia dis hyar story-bo0k" ~WhuferF
asked MS mother. ~Kase hit ser be
went TO bed VIII de chickens. "-Phila
~. delphia Press
E0uivoeal Comment. This, said ths
funeral director is the very latest II
casksts: what do you think OF ity
y / Well said the cigar man from hex
q door after a long study Of the article
81 I'D hate to be seen dead in TIN
q dauap0ns Press
q Cupids Bunker. The Ellington
Z. smith wedding IS Of How dreadful
n What's the reaSouTr ~Ob. aliss Thing
n ton wanted her name 10 three size
"A larger type than his on the announce
II ment cards. and he wouldn't have it.
NJ indianapolis Journal
Consistent. at Any Rate; why
81 Dolly. where's Mariea I thought yor
II were playing circus" Well she 20
! mad and went home cause I wouIdn'
give her any peanuts. was the mon
y key and she was the tiger. and tiger
= don't eat peanuJs-"-Bazar.
A A shop-keeper wrote to one OF hi
customers as follows. Il am able {
offer you cloth Ike the inclosed sampl
= at half a crown a yard In case I q
81 not hear from you. shall conclud
81 that you wish 20 pay only two shilling
y yard. In order to lose no time, I a
II sept the last mentioned price TT
u Bits.
Hodown-I understand your wife u
sisted on drawing the plans herself e
your new house. JigSup-Xes, she
busy over there now. HodOwn--Oh.
NJ thought she had finished. She told n
{ wife she had all the closets laid GU
Of Jigsup--Yes. but now she's got 10 pl
for the rest OF the house around them.
Philadelphia Press.
~Oh. we had the loveliest arrsng
ment al our church society last wee
.ea Every woman contributed 70 the mi
per sionary cause i've dollars, which $.
,Se earned herself by hard work" "Ho