davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
ECHOES FROM
 THE MECAPHONE
From the clogtown Megaphone.

From the Clogtown Megaphone.
 Mayor Gllhooly brought to the Mega phone office yesterday an incubator which he has just received, and over which the population. of Clogtown is greatly aroused Many of our people are positively opposed to the introduction of machinery to do the labor formerly done by anything having life. They claim that 1t is depriving the hen of an innate privilege when some man makes machine which will hatch eggs while the poor hen is probably thrown out of a job in consequence.
 At any rate this incubator is an innocent looking little thing, and has sign stuck on it's side reading: "The Wooden Hen. It is not guaranteed to cackle or lay eggs but it is said to be death on matching. It is guaranteed to hatch anything that comes within it's grasp, and the writer warns Mayor Gilhooly to keep at safe distance from this deadly incubator. If he should herpen to get his foot caught in it an entirely new breed of feet would be proving around in Clogtown trying to find an owner. Everybody does not wish to wear the Gilhooly style of feet.
 Some incubators have been known to hatch out a perfect hardware store simply by placing a few padlocks and old iron in- side them. After a few weeks when MT. Gilhooly has become accustomed to the ways of his incubator he can probably give an entertaining lecture on 'The incu- bator and it's benefits to society" An in- cubator like this one, which can hatch out a dozen turkeys from half a dozen duck eggs, would be a fortune during the holi- day season. It is something which the best class of people need not be above associa- ting with and calling their most intimate friend.
 The mayor is on the road to fortune if he can prove that this machine will not come flying over the dinner table cac6ling for all that is out just because it has matched an egg or two This is what has brought the old-fashioned hen into dis repute; she is too fond of shouting over her own achievements in society. She lacks modesty, and MT. Gilhooly's incuba- tor has every appearance of being the pos sessor of all the modesty of lady.
 The only trouble which may overtake Gilhooly is that he will become too inter- ested in his incubator and sit up nights watching it hatch. These cold nights he will catch his death from cold trampng around on the chilly floor in his bare feet going to see what his incubator is doing. If he can stay himself from doing this there is all the chances that he will reap a harvest from his wooden 1en.'
 J. D. G.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

is to be employed. General Butler will not move rapidly unless the signals from Gen eral White, with whom he is in constant new strategy demanded by new conditions by skilled marksmsn behind rocks-wlll be amply illustrated around Ladysmitn, edge of what modern warfare is. General Butler was quick to profit by the lesson of his first attack and his cautious methods have some what restored confidence In him, and renewed his popularity which was waning.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
HE ONLY DAILY NEwsPApEa IN ALABAMA
Who Can Vote in Primaries.

Two counties will hold primaries this week, and all the rest of the counties VIII soon hold similar meetings eff the real sovereigns of the state. These sovereigns have However, through their duly a2- pointed representatives, named the condi- tions of voting in these primaries These conditions are wholly reasonable-so req sonable that an honorable man does not need them at all; for no honorable man would participate in primary of party unless he intended to support the candidates of that party. The conditions are simply common honesty put in black and whi,e. Here they are:
 Be it resolved by the democratic sta.e executive committee of Alabama that we hereby cordially invite all conservative voters, irrespective of past political asso- citations or differences who can unite wtAa us in the effort for pure and econom.cal and constitutional government. and who will support the nominees and prtnr. .,ss of the democratic party. zto - nclpate Tn the primaries OF 1ln@s lly throughout the state.
 "Resefvd, further, That all persons so nas-scipating in the primaries, conventions or mass meetings of the party hereafter to be held thereby pledge themsevs to support tn nominees of suol primaries, conventions or mass meetings, whether municipal, county, state CT federal
 These conditions should be rlgIdly en- forced against the tricky and dishonorable. Each county committee possesses full power in the premises. It can name its methods of enforcing unese conditions. They should at least be widely published. They should be posted at every voting place. They should stare the trckster in the face. They make every one who votes a democrat. He goes away pledged, ceas- ing to be a pc2ulist or republican the mo- ment he votes at one of the coming pr- maries
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
SENATOR yonGA IS WARENGo

From the Marengo Democrat
 Senator Morgan is one of the greatest living Alabamians His career in the sen- ate hss not cTlgsr-c;feoced credit upon Ala bama, but upon the entire suoth. Further. he is one of the greatest living Americans and, democrat as he is, true and tried, h;s ability is recognized by republicans as well as democrats. Had he been a northern in- stead of a southern democrat he would have long ago been placed upon the presi- B Jo sseI u07q peu ep JI leFor Iepusp Confederate general and more of a Union soldier he would long ago have been presi- dent. If he had been more of a strckster and scheming politician he would long ago have been a rich man. But he comes back with the toga of senator, which was placed upon his shoulders by our fathers more than twenty years ago, as pure and snotless as when it was first placed there. He loves his friends; befts his enemies. Ee will come before our people to account fo- the trust reposed in him. He has noth- ing to conceal-nothing of which to be ashamed. He has grown gray in the serv- ies of Alabama democrats.
 The Democrat believes it entirely unnec- essary for Senator Morgan to come to Marengo in the interest of his candidacy, still Marengo will give him a cordial well come, will listen to the advice which his experience and wisdom may dictate and will bid him God speed in his canvass.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
Besiegcd at Sherpur

The troops stayed in Kabul through the winter while justice was being measured out to the persons responsible for the mur- der of Cavignari. The British army was encamped in the fortified place the prince had prepared for his own army. Roberts was practically governing northern Afghan istan in Kabul. Early in December, 1S79 there occurred general Afghan uprising against him. It was impossible for rein forcements to reach him. His situation grew steadily worse and his brigades were several times beaten in the hills about Kabul. He was forced out of Kabul and had to take refuge in the Sherpur fortress. The Afghans made a terrible attack upon the fortress between December IA and De- cember 23. On the last day the garrison, which had greatly discouraged the Afghans by the coolness and fierceness of the de- fense made a sortie from the hills in the rear of the fortress, turned the flank of the besiegers and raised the siege The Afghan force dfsintegrated.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
MARY MORRISON
t thy window be!

O, Mary, at thy window be! It is the wished, the trysted houTi Those smiles and glances let me see That make the miser's treasures poor; How blthely wad I bide the stoure, A weary slave frae sun to sun, Could I the rich reward secure The lovely Mary Morrison. Yestreen when to the trembling string The dance gaed through the lighted ha' To thee my fancy took it's wing, I sat, but neither heard nor saw; Though this was flair, and that was braw, And you the toast of a the town, I sighed, and said among them a "Ye are na Mary Morrison" O, Mary can'st thou wreck his peace, What for thy sake was gladly dee? Or canst thou break that heart of his, Where only faut is loving thee? If live for love thou wilt na gie, At least be pity to me shown; A thought lrngentle canna be The thought O Mary Morrison.
 ROBERT BURNS.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
ELECTRIC SIGNS FO. CHURCHES

From Church economist.
 Within few years there has been Won denful development in illumination. Ore has only to pass down the streets of city, especially ln the districts where even- ing amusements center, to observe the great progress in this direction. The the aters, the newspapers, stores and oeher resorts have their various messages printed ill dazzling gas, oil or electric light on tine black page of night, so that no one could fail to read lthcm. But the churches stand dark and voicele9s.
 We are glad to say that one enterprising pastor in Brooklyn has recognized the chance to publish the gospel by means of the electric light. This is Rev Howard Wilbur Ennis, of the First Reformed church. He explains to the ''Church Econ omist" that his attention was first called to the need cf an illuminated sign by overlooking a clnild ask her father, the two were passing the church, what it was. The father first replied that he did not know, and finally informed the persever.ng child that he guessed" it was a Roman Ca lloLic church. q made up my mlnd,' said MT. Ennis, 'tthat people should here after know what my building was"
 '"-ae next evening 1 spent at dle Waldorf Astoria calling some friends On the Tni1lty-fourth street side I noticed several electric signs whose directions could be easily read at a distance. l resolved to adopt the same scheme in front of my church. When I got home l Thought the matter over. l took a pencil and Laper and made a draught of sign. What shall I put in it?' I asked myself. Tn the first place. I said, my own people know abont the church and the different services and l must put something on it alTt Will appeal to strangers. Minimum notices were sui ficlent; that is, those of the regular serv- ices if the church.
 ''To lhave an ecclesiastical appearances, I'll put two crosses on it. With the name of the church and the minister's name the inscription was complete. The next morn ing went to ne.gLnboring iron works with my rough drawing. After conference wi n the architects I decided that an electric s,gn 41a feet by 2h feet was large enough. They made it. The stencil was cut in a piece cf sheet iron with the wording as Follows:
 " First Reformed Church, Howard Will bur Ennis. Minister. Services, 1O:3O and 7:SO'
 "On the back of the stencil was mounted a piece of opaque, milky white glass to show the lettering off in the day time. h. side the box were placed six 16-candle power electric lights to light up the sign at night.
 1.-The sign was placed right on the front corner of the church, about ten feet frocn the sidewalk. Connections were made w3th the electric wires in the church, wlnicih is lighted by electricity. The whole thing cost $100. It has already paid me back more than that. Several have come into the church services attracted by that sign, and others who pass the building will thereafter know what church it is and when the services are held"
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
Armor Plate Before Congress.

The house naval committee will go tomor- row to the Carnegie plants near Pittsburg to study and determine the armor-plate question. The Krupp-Carnegie combine is engaged in holding up the government, and the members of 1t are not the persons that the government should consult. At least they are not the only persons that should be consulted. A more exacting combine is not possible. Employing a foreign patent basis, two Pennsylvania mills have formed a combination for the purpose of demanding s545 ton for armor made from a ton. To say that the manipulation of Alabama iron is worth the difference would not be believed even by marines. The price demanded is preposterously high.
 The chief question is, shall the two mills be permitted to hold up sevenIty-five mil lions of people? Shall rich nation kneel at the feet of a combine, accept whatever terms it may see fit from time to time to make? Even if arnaer sOsein- raes, mi should cost more than s545 ton the terms of the combine should be reject ed and If politics did not demand that Pennsylvania and especially her campaign subscribers should be placated, such terms would be summarily dismissed If couple of Alabama mills had formed similar combine, and had demanded similar terms from the government a howl would have gone up from every Pennsylvania town against the acceptance of such robber scheme. The cry then would be, 'Let the government build an armor- plate plant at once in Pennsylvania"
 We say now that it is better to.build an armor plant in Pennsylvania than to &C., cept the terms of the combine No doubt greater economy would be possible in an Alabama mill, and this section of the coun- try has not been favored with a govern ment factory; but if the Krupp-Carnegie combine can be beaten in no other way then let a government plant be located in favored and petted Pennsylvania. Anything is better than hold up at the order of combine that is absolutely mereiless and conscienceless.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
THREE GREAT MOVEMENTS

From the Iowa State Register.
 Bishop Fowler, of the Methodist church, i na Chicago interview last week, said "The three great missionary movements of the Christian era are: First, the conver- sion of St. Paul, which opened the way to the Gentiles; second the firing of Fort Sumter which made the great AngoSax- on race fit to use; and third, the blowing up of the Maine which sent us out into the world to distribute the truth" Bishop Fowler is neither religious traitor nor a traitor to his country,
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
SHORT STORIES
 OF THE DAY
The Campaign in Arghanistan


 There was plenty of work for the British army in 1877. 1878 and 1879, in Asia and in Africa, relates the Newcastle QEngand) Chronicle. The Ameer of Afghanistan, with Russian encouragement, attempted to shut the British out of his territory On Mo- vember B. 1S7S, three columns moved into Afghanistan from India. One, commanded by Sir Donald Stewart went for Kanda- har; another, under Sir Samuel Brown, went through the Khyber pass, while third under Major Roberts, afterwards Lord Roberts of Kandahar, marched out through Kuram. Roberts found the fight ing. Afghans waited for him at the outlet of the Kuram valley on the side of pre- cipitous mountain at the end of the pass. Here occurred the battle of the Peiwar Ko- tai. Roberts saw that he was outnum- bered, and that the Afghan position was impregnable against a direct attack He moved two-thirds of his force by night to the left flank of the Afghan position and swept them from the mountain the next forenoon. His task was complicated by the treachery of some of the Sepoys, who had not been cleansed of the taint of mutiny, and who had endeavored to alarm the Af- ghans during the night march by firing their rifles. The Afghans scattered.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
ACTRESS JULIA MORRISON
Leaves Chattanooga for Lecture Tour
 Her Plans

A special from Chattanooga, dated We'd nesday, says: md
 Julia Morrison James, the actress recently acquitted by jury of this county of the murder of Frank Leiden, goes to Shelby vile, Tenn, where, tomorrow night she lectures for the first time on "The Other Side of Stage Life" Miss Morrison has had much difficulty ln securing a house in the various towns where she has applied to lecture. She goes to Athens on Friday night, and after that t~date her movements are uncertain. It is stated that she re- ceived today an offer from St. Louis com pany to go into vaudeville, and that she has accepted.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
Victory at Charasia

Nearly a year of negotia tlons followed, and the Afghans at last consented to let Sir Louis Cavignarii establish a British residency at Kabul. Within three weeks after the arrangement was made. Cavignari and his companions at Kabul were massacred by an Afghan mob. IL was quite clear that the Ameer had encour- aged the demonstration that ended in the massacre, and if Cavignari's death could not be traced directly to him, it was cer- tain that the Ameer had not exerted him self to protect the Englishman, and that if the massacre was to be punished the Brit ish must do it themselves. Roberts Kuram force was quickly .reorganized, anI he fought his way to Kabul. He took with him four regiments of cavalry, eight regi- meuts of infantry and four batteries of mounted artillery. As he approached Ka- oul the Ameer came out to meet him, and during the battle of Charasia on Septem- Der and 7 1879, the Ameer, the actual commander of the Afghan forces, directed their movements from the British camp. Nomlnally the Afghan army was in re- bellion against the Ameer, but Roberts suspected, and later proved, that the army was carrying out his orders The battle of Charasa cost Roberts IS killed and 70 wounded The Afslhans left 300 dead be hind them when they retreated.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

From the New York Press.

From the New York Press.
 You can always tell a married man by the way he can tell that you are not.
 There is only one thing worse to the aver age woman than to be talked about, and that is not to be.
 When a man is member of her church, a woman will never let her husband say that he isn't Christian.
 Life to a manis duel between him and his enemies; life to woman is a duel be- tween her and her friends.
 Probably lots ee mem have been made liars by their parents teaching them to say they didn't want any more after they had had Gae piece of pie.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
IN JEFFERSON COUNTY

From the Jasper Mountain Eagle.
 Both the Morgan and Johnston forces are organizing in Jefferson county, and a battle royal is promised. Jefferson's six repre- sentatyes are worth a good deal in con- test for the senate. They not only count six votes, but that county usually sends men of much influence as its representa- lives
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

From the Ozark Southern Star.
 The great victory won for Senator Nor gan fin Clarke county last week was largely due to the efforts of Hon. Sid Bowie, of Calhoun county, who made close can vass of the county He is a brilliant young man, forcible speaker, and a natural horn loader of mon
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
Gen ou,'a-'c Cautious ad-,rr,

G. BaE.. a Hr=#- #ae Iss- son ely aE T1es. a 9e F. mor- aearaf 5asyzs sss.asl a il= rocks p -harpsboos=r a-med '#..# & fouesgange rifle and smoEeless powder . and feach roes officers v e. 1o.
 shot down by the dozen, anu the infantry is now but support to quick moving and Ianking cavalry, and to the batteries of field. and even of seize. guns and howitz- CTS.
 The foot hills of Natal are very rough and rocky. and progress among them is difficult, and necessarily slow. If the gari- son of Ladysmith does not need immediate assistance, it may as we'll be slow as speedy. The wearing out of the Boers Is progressing, and that seems to be the true theory of this war. The Boers are to be worn out by constant hammering. They have put their last man in the field, unless indeed a few be hereafter gathered from Cape Colony, while the British armies are to be recruited in the field before the enemy, whom they are daily hammerfng. IA constant stream of men and supplies is going forward to the British armies of Butler. Gatacre and Methuen. and they will continue to go forward until those armies become overwhelmingly strong, and the Boers are worn to frazzle.
 Neither side will. in word, attack en- trenched lines, and the wearing-out process
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
Got Even With the Government

In the rank and file of the army no sub feet is more frequently commented upon than General Otis extreme conscientious ness in matters of petty detail, says the Chicago Tribune.
 During an advance on the north line re- gently one company had to lie down at the side of the road for shelter from the well-directed volleys of the insurgents. One of the privates had dropped his haversack in tine middle of the road away back, and, after the company had laid down, he calm ly stood up and walked down the. road to- ward the lost haversack He made a fine target for the insurgents and the bullets rattled around him pretty lively.
 '.Ffere, come back here, OMaley.' yelled the lieutenant of the company. "You'l be killed"
 Well" replied O'Malley over his shoul- der, "I might jest as well be killed as have General Otis a'runnin me up hill and down dale and comin' over to me house every mornn' and sayin', 'o'Mal- ley, why don't you pay the government for that haveysack@
 Then he calmly walked on and got the lost piece of property and, as he came back and sat down just in time to escape a vol ley of Mausers, he threw t,le elaversaok oa the ground and said: And when nc does come tomorrow mornin' to me house I'll say Otis, me little man, you're dead wrong. never lost no haveysack. There's your bloody old potato bag. Take it to the government with me compliments
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
NEEDS A CARLOAD

From the Centrevile Press.
 Hon. John w. Tomlinson, candidate for governor, sent few lapel buttons with his picture an them to a friend in Bibb. If you expect to send one to all your friend, down here, charter car.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

Count Castellanes arms are not quite long enough to slap the face of the editor of Figaro at present.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

Count Boni should have brought his proof along. His statement that he never gam bled or speculated in his life is at present unes tablished.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

The aristocracy is going to the war so rapidly there is danger that the Duke of Tuscaloosa will slip away some night, leav- ing the throne unprotected against plebian press.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

The Hon. Mark Hanna, who bought his own seat, is juror in the Clark case. Clark knows a thing or two.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

Governor Pingree gives the Michigan re- publicans the choice between his renomina- tion and Sam Jones campaign in a presi- dential year. He means business.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

Web. Davis wears an armored hat in South Africa. The administration cannot spare its favorite spellbinder.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

Talladega has two cotton mills, and it is will do for the town. Every cent of money in the two mills now in operation is home capital.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26
The Relief of I<andahar

There was only a. few scattered skirmish- es until the following July. Roberts was preparing to take his force back to India when news reached him of a disaster to the forces of General Burrows. near Kan dahar Burrows had only 2,476 men. The Afghans numbering 2o000, caught him at Maiwand on July 27, 1880. Burrows am munition gave out, and he lost 1,1O9 men, The remainder escaped to Kandahar and were penned up there. Roberts asked and got permission from the Indian govern ment to take his Kabul force and go to the rescue of Kandahar. With a force of 1O00o men Roberts left Kabul on August Il. For more than month no news from hiin reached the outside world. Then came the tidings that he had relieved the Kandahai' garrison on August 31, and on September l had administered summary punishment to the Afghan forces that were encamped nearby. Political arrangements were made for the installation of Abdur Rahman as Ameer; he was favored by both Russia and England, and promised to keep the passes open and protect British residents. Roberts took his army back to India
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

The Ingalls presidential boom pre- vails in Kansas among those who desire to shelve that long-geared statesman.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

Senator Hale's eccentric sympathy for Spain in the late war has been transferred to the Boers. He should next try the Slavs.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

Ex-Secretary Bliss wears Otis whisSers, and this fact has taken him out of the vice. presidential handicap.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

The trusts are doing the ostracizing at present, and they propose to keep it up.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

Aguinaldo is a firm believer in the doc trine that every one should keep his capital moving.
The age-herald., 1900-01-26

The Pennsylvania plum tree Is a bush alongside the Montana scrub pine.