The age-herald., 1900-05-06
A PICTURESQUE "MAJAH'
 EOF THE REGULAR ARMY

1 Herald.
 George Augustus Armes, major, U. S.
 army (retired), says that he has sent near 1 ly 2S,000 men to South Africa to join the
 Boer forces. If any other of Uncle Sans 1 officers, active or retired, had made the l same statement, 1t is highly probable that 1 the British ambassador at Washington woould take some notice. Major Armes | nowadays has the fortune, or the misfor- | tune, in whichever light one chooses to view 1t, of never being taken seriously. 1 Whenever things become bit quiet in
 army circles Major Armes may be count | ed upon to do something picturesquely pyr- l otechnical. His is that infinite variety which neither custom nor discipline can
 stale. Ever and again cabinet officers and | bureaucrats have their staid souls stirred by the tale of some breach of military | diplomatic etiquette" They ask in hushed
 tones who the offender may be. When the | name of Major Armes is given the pool of offcialdom is smooth once more and re- l fleets smile.
 l George Augustus Armes was once court
 martialed. It Is doubtful if any court pro- l ceedings on record contain within so small
 a compass so much of the pathetic, the |
 jor Armes at the time of his trial was l | captain in the tenth cavalry and he was 1 placed in the Fort Leavenworth, then on
 the very outskirts of civilization, with l list of charges against him long enough l and serious enough to make an ordinary
 man think of nothing but a preparation of
 his defense, the bending of every nerve to l establish his innocence, and, above all, the
 seeking in way to prejudice against him
 his fellow officers who, sitting as jurors, 1 held his fate in their hands. No less a per 1 son than Major General Samuel D. Sturges, l then colonel of the famous seventh cav | airy, was president of the court.
 Major Armes was arraigned and the ques- tion, Have you any objection to any mem Der of the court sitting in judgment?' was asked him. Armes arose, looked every of- ficer carefully over from head to foot, and | then turning to the judge advocate calmly said "They are all a pack of double-dyed scoundrels." The crack and simultaneous Shiverng of court-martial decorum and of- ficial dignity that followed could be heard to the Rockies. The room was ordered cleared and there was a solemn discussion, the result of which was an additional charge against the accused of contempt of court. He was tried for this separately and
 was sentenced to be confined in the post guardhouse pending his trial on other chareAs
 The second trial came on and then there
 came the first touch of the tragic. Armes
 was accused of wrongfully disposing of
 government property, offense tanta-
 mount to theft. He defended himself with
 vehemence and an ability that won of themselves general belief in his innocence.
 The evidence of his innocence was also clear and he was acquitted of the charge which affected his honor It was only a step to the ridiculous Another charge against the major was that of conduct un- becoming an officer and a gentleman The court deliberated long and solemnly and finally concluded that inasmuch as Major Armes had said "Durned fool' instead of Damned fool,' as charged in the indct- | ment, and also because he had been given provocation sufficiant to justify him in the
 use of the mlder expletive, he should be acquitted of the charge preferred Major Armes, however, was found guilty of con-
 duct to the prejudice of good order and military discipline, and June T. 1870, he was dishonorably discharged from the service. Then there began a fight. Armes carried the matter into congress, and eight years after his dismissal the finding of the court
 martial was overturned, the record of dis | missal was changed to read "honorably discharged.' and then Major Armes was restored to his rank and command in the United States army
 In the year 1883 George Augustus Armes was retired from the army for disability
 in the line of duty. SinGa his retirement
 he has kept official and social Washington pretty well stirred up. It was he who all the correspondents declared upset the dig nifty of half dozen parade grand marshals and much disturbed President Elect Cleve-
 lands placidity by attempting to take command of the inaugural procession while 1t was in the midst of it's marching. Later a reopening of sectional troubles was threate by the attempt of Major Armes
 to carry out his threat that he would tweak Wade Hamptons nose.
 The name of Major General John M. Schofield is to Major George A. Armes like the prick of the torreador's dart to the bull Memory does not serve at this moment al to the first cause of this state of things but 1t is certain and a matter of official rec ord that when General Schofield was com
 manding the army he took the unprece- dented action of sending a non-commis- stoned officer and a guard of enlisted men
 to surround Major Armes' house to keep
 him within doors. This was in lieu of put
 ting the retired officer in arrest in the usual way. It was said at the time that Armes
 had threatened the general, but the matte never came to trial
 Recently Major Armes has written A
 book, and among other picturesque things
 which he says within Its covers is that the pest way to become a member of the law. department of the army is to begin by
 landing at Castle Garden and blowing a horn. This was written apropos of the
 fact that a distinguished assistant iudge advocate general came to this country from
 his native land, Germany, and for some years footed a cornet as private in one , Of Uncle Sams bands There are some men who wish that Major George A. Armes
 would lead his contingent of 2SOOO men to
 the Transvaal in person. If the major
 were younger he would doubtless have no
 hesitancy in so doing, for eccentric though he be- no one has ever impugned the cour-
 age of Picturesque Armes"