The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1900-02-22
he shifted wonderingly and with no

ing look at Mrs. Jobson. Just what
you've got in the ice chest, you know.
Mr.. Swiftboy is a domestic man, and
he understands that we may lave taken
you unprepared."
Mr.. Jobson's glances at Mrs. Jobson
said as plainly as if the words were
written on a. placard hanging around
his neck: "You just want TO see to it
that there's a top-notch lunch on the
table in just is minutes, or therell DO
some echoes around here later on"
Mrs. Jobson, after moments de-
sultory conversation, excused herse4f,
ran down the basement steps, placed
hat on the colored woman's head and
sent her out by the alley gate after
luncheon food 1t was mostly of the
delicatessen and canned variety. There
was some sliced tongue and ham, pot
ted ham, canned salmon, hurriedly -con-
structed potato salad, the remains of
Sundays turkey, raspberry jam and
coffee and tea on the table when, after
a frenzied scurrying around, Mrs. job
son got the table set with fresh napery
and the best silver and called the men
to luncheon. Mr.. Jobson surveyed the
table approvingly, as did his old school
chum, who was well-groomed looking
man, who looked as if he might be no
stranger to Holsters and grilled bones.
"Well, my dear, you've certainly done
very well, considering how little you
expected u.s." said Mr.. Jobson, beam
ingly, and then they went at the lunch.
ooh, by the way, have you any bottled
beer on ice?" asked Mr.. Jobson, after
moment.
NO." replied Mrs. Jobson, "the last
was used on Saturday, and the beer
man hasn't been around yet, but I can
send"
"Oh, never mind, my dear-never
mind at ALL" said Mr.. Jobson, amiably.
Get along bully without it, can't we,
Swiftboy? Guess we'd be a heap bet
ter off without the stuff, anyhow"
Then Mr.. Jobson, while his friend
was bending over his plate, gave Mrs.
Jobson glance that contained world
of meaning.
"Swiftboy," said Mr.. Jobson, you'll
have to overlook this hasty affair, but
you know"
Overlook it?" interrupted his friend,
helping himself literally to the salad.
Overlook it? I guess not. I'm going
to do just the best know how by it.
It's immense-haven't enjoyed things
to eat so much since I left home. Mrs.
Jobson, l congratulate you upon your
skill in formulating a luncheon in a
case of emergency"
Thus the luncheon passed off, and
awhile after it was over the two men
went downtown. There was a steely
glitter in Mr.. Jobson's eye when he
returned home that evening.
Madam" he inquired of Mrs. Job
son, as soon as he had taken off his hat,
what do you think this establishment
is--a New York soubrettes tiat?"
"Why, what are you" Mrs. Jobson
started to answer.
when l invite friend, substan-
tial business man, up to my home for
luncheon" continued Mr.. Jobson, stern.
ly, cant you do any better than to re-
gale him and load him up with stuff
such as a Miss Tottie Coughdrop sets be-
fore her chorus girl friends when she
asks them to one a. m. feed?"
"But you brought him so unexpected
ly, and
what kind of stuff do you think
grocery store sliced ham is to set be-
fore one of your husbands guests?
Couldn't you have rung in some cold
hot Ii of =
it, anyhow, to send a black servant
somersaulting and handspringing out
the alley gate after zirc-irclosed eat
ab.es when guests are sitting in the par
Tor waiting for something whercwith
TO appease their hunger? Why couldn't
you have had some nice homemade oys-
ter patties, for instance? How about
couple of fried chickens? Wouldn't
they have been about the thing? DO
you ever cook anything around here,
anyhow, except the stuff that you dole
out to me at dinner? Have you ever got
anything fit to eat slowed away in the
ice box, Like other civilized people? Do
you"
"But to-day is wash day, and"
ut wouldn't make any difference if it
was Decoration day, or Independence
Gay, or Labor day, or any other old day;
you'd have to kite that servant out the
alley, and oh, and by the way, it's
mighty funny what becomes of all the
beer-not even bottle of beer to give
the man. I'd like"
"Now. you know that nobody in the
house touches it but yourself, and"
mighty queer where it goes mys-
FERROUS, to say the least. Whole thing
was the worst frost, the dismalest
make-believe for luncheon that / ever
saw, and that's no"
BUT Mr.. Swiftboy said that he really
enjoyed it, and he said"
"1es; / know what he said. That
was sarcasm, Mrs. Jobson--plain, every
day sarcasm. III bet he said to him
self while he was getting off those re-
marks that the next time any friend
of his hailed him for q home luncheon
there'd be blue apples on peach trees
And that's what there'n be the next
time | invite a friend up here for