The Savannah morning news. (Savannah, Ga.) 1900-current, 1900-09-09
FEB b. ALPAuGH. ESQ.
Bundle Bee Lawyer.
No Courts Needed
Always Get what | go For.

zeb u. Alpaugb, Esq. the strangest
lawyer In the state. has his Office over
Jolly's blacksmith shop and on the once
IL the sign here given. II was painted a
few years ago by an itinersnt artist for
whom zed b. Alpsugh. Esq. did some
wask.
The equipment OF the humble bee law
yer. besides the humble bees which are
his principal machinery. cons ELS OF a deck
two chairs, quire OF legal cap. a pen.
bottle OF ink and a pair OF rubber boots.
shaggy headed. bewhiskered. sharp
eyed. lsnky individual r. tho humble bee
lawyer. He has covered one side OF his
room with growing grass and earth for a
space Of - feet. and in this mass dwell
the humble bees IN partnership with the
attorney.
"Alpaugh. Esq a. salA the shaggy head
Yes. that's me. I'm the humble bee law
yer and the only one In the country. What
is humble bee lawyer Wen. look at
me and you'll see what he's like. Listen 20
me and IN tell you what he does.
There are queer people living around
here who work in the ore mines They are
full OF superstition. One OF their IDEAS n
that the humble bee II the advance agent
OF III luck. make q speciality OF collecting
bad debts. aud I'm called what am call
"a because I use humble bees In my bus
mess.
The workers IN the ore mines do not
speak our lauguuEe. but they know how
TO skin people Just the same. They Will
buy anything they can get on credit. but
they won't pay until ! get after them
with my humble bees.
About Ave years ago discovered the
horror these iron diggers. as We cell them.
have OF the white-hooded humble bee. The
white-hooded ones. you know. are the fe-
males, and can't sting. The iron diggers
believe that any bee that cant esing Il
the harbinder Of all sorts Of bad luck and
trouble When I found this out resolved
on a new plan OF bad-ciebt collecting.
zone day caught a few dozen humble
bees. and. putting them IN a bootle, went
to the mines on a collecting tour. ! made
a dozen visisa but couldn't collect dol
lar. So. al the next house ! went 10,
pulled out my bottle Of bees, and opening
the stop. allowed some OF them to escape.
The effect was wonderful. The old creme
who inhabited the cabin became highly
excited az once. There was a general
commotion and a gathering o. iron dig
gers from the other houses
Then / picked up the stove-lid litter,
and, smashing the bottle. let all the bees
60 There was a general ruch for the
door. got S on account from that woman
before I left.
Then 1 heMau eeu1fiA WHITES VI ""N"
90 every iron digger against whom I had
a claim. For each dollar due I sent one
bee. The bottles were uncorked. - mat
when the recipients removed the paper
wrapping the bees few out.
The result was that ! collected about
all the money that was due. with interest
at that / then found that was running
out OF bees. go / dug up several bees
nests and. brought them In here.
Then / nxed up that pile of boxes
against the wall. covered them with eartn
ana powed clover seeds on a.. Upon this
clover the bees live and are happy They
20 out IN the air once IN while. but
trouble no one who does not nrst trouble
them. l suppose there are t.Ooo bees IN
this pile OF earth, and l gufss I've used
up 1900 in collecting bad debts.
II never have TO go 10 court now.
save all the expenses OF summonses ana
court fees"
The iron digsers are convinced that led
Alpauah. ESQ. IL IN league with the deyil
when they call on him ana see All MS
humble bees they run screaming from his
once ana send In their money by mall.