Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1900-02-10
MANDY AT THE THEATER

Have you ever been to q theater. Man.
dy?' young matron of Columbia Heights
asked her middle-aged children's nurse the
other morning.
NO. an-deed, An haint, honey replied
Mandy. "Ah haint got no money tub look
away!'
WELL" said the young matron, "you may
put on one Of your pretty new aprons after
luncheon and take the children to the matt
nee. I'll go along with you to help You to
look after the children
So the young matron. with her two little
ores and the middle-aged Nurse. went to q
polite vaudeville matinee taking four seats
in the front row of the balcony.
A muscular-limbed toe-dancer opened the
performance. Mandy watched the gyrations
of the smirking young woman through her
fingers.
.'Ump-uh!" she muttered to herself, ''ef
dat hain't scan'lousi Sech uh It'll, young
gal as dat-uh-one uh-hoppin' uhroun 'dout
no mo- clo'es on huh dan'd keep uh rag.
baby walnut Eff dat hain't scan lous, jeS'
show me sumpin' at is. OATS all!'
When the toe-dancer left the stage with a
final kick at the back OF her head Mandy
turned to her mistress with a mournful
face.
.'Ah doan' see how yo' kin sit heah an
look at sech folks, deed All doan', honey|
she said, reproachfully.
She watched the outrageous conduct to-
ward each other of the knockabout team
with wonder and amazement. When the
larger man of the team apparently dug his
stidened forefingers into the smaller man s
eyes, and kicked him on the Sims, and
pounded him on the head with croquet
| mallet, and yanked him around by means
of a crook-topped cane, and squirted a
siphon-full of water on him, and scratched
matches on his face, and showed lighted
cigar into his ear, and otherwise abused
him shamefully Mandy almost rose in her
seat in her wrath.
Sob Io4 ~ ~
fc'ks uh-sittin' down deah doan' climb up
an beat de life out o. dat big, no-'count
bull-dozuhv' she whispered, hoarsely, to her
mistress. de ideah O. uh big man lax he
all uh-treatin' uh It'll man dat can't hep
hese'f dat-uh-way! All doan' see how yo'
| kin sit deah an laff, missy, deed All
doan'"
Mandy regarded the blacked-up mono
lCgist with a stolid countenance.
"Jes' look at dat fool wife man uh-tryin'
tub play he-alls uh nigguh?' she said,
scornfully. "Ah wunduh eff he-all thinks
we-all think he's uh scarborough nigguh!
Mandy didn't see anything remarkable
about the music rendered by the male quar-
tet.
Dem men haint no great shakes wen it
comes tub singin'," was her judgment. "Dey
sing purity enough, but All knows lots O.
no-'count nigguhs back in Oh Prince
Gawge's county w'ut kin sing all uh-roun'
dem wife men,"
The man-an-wife sketch team, giving the
usual act III WHICH the nuSDdnQ comes nome
after having dined all too we'll and tries to
bluff his wife out of her wrath, filed
Mandy with WEAKNESS.
"Who-all evuh heahd uh gen'lm'n tex on
lax dat wen he-all gifts dat-uh-way?" she
asked her mistress. "W'en uh man come
home dat-uh-way, heal doan' say nothin'.
He let he wife do all de sayin' an wen she
git tired he crawls intuh bald an OATS all
dey Is tub iti''
Mandy regarded the magician with awe,
not unrnixed with fear.
"Ah wouldn't want no sech creepy man
like dat uh-roun' me, yo' heah me uh-
talkin!' she whispered to her mistress.
1t was thus throughout the performance.
Didn't you like any of 1t, Mandy?" her
mistress asked her when they were coming
away from the theater.
''Sech foolishness may be all right TO-
wife folks" replied Mandy, but All feels
lax uh wicked sinnuh, an All doan' want
no mo- sech doin's TO me! Anyhow, All
hain't got no money tub look aWay!"