The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1900-03-30
KANSAS CLIPS AND COMMENTS

hhNOAD ODlfS AND COMMENIS
An Ottawa undertaking firm is
named "Dunn and Crumbley."
The girls of Wetmore have ufRtn.
lied a band. Now look out Tor nan,
day skirt uniforms.
They had a st, Pstrick's day party
In MCPHERSON and several guests used
sucn broad brogue they couldn't get
through the doors with it.
The Bliss Furniture company
OF Columbus, gives Bills
guarantee to every outfit solo
to newly married parties.
The Ahti.Horse Thief Association
mad an oyster supper recently near
Coteyville. They pronounced them
much superior to horse flesh.
Junction City girls have issued leap
year party invitations. Those girls
may not he much on mathematics but
they'll get there alleesamee.
The Chanute Times usually has
sweeping assertions in its editorial
columns but varied the rule this week
with long article on broom corn.
A Manhattan miller found fur
collarette at his mill one morning aud
advertised 1t in the papers, but the
owner Is timid about claiming it.
Seven tramps slept in Chsnute's
school house one night and the police
Judge after giving them stony stare
put the whole gang on the rock pile.
The latest street exhibition in
Atchlson was given by q negro who
showed unmistakable signs of small
pox. Now that Don't Worry club
will be tested.
They are eating greens at Eldorado
already, not because the sun has
favored that town but because Of the
heat aroused over $780, 900 bonds for q
chool building.
A Carl Junction lawyer, convicted
OF being an accomplish in horse
theft, tacke this card on the door:
Gone to jail. Be back in thirty
days"
A Salvation Army band is stationed
at Garnett this week and the EaqLe
says that the town girls tried to fiirt
with the boys. Girls simply dole ON
soldiers.
1t is rumored that the Santa Fe Is
arranging to locate a cotton mill in
southern Kansas and Wichita is
trying to pull the wool over the
officials eyes.
Walnut Valley Times; Three small
boys went swimming at "Four
| Stumps" yesterday. Kide who rush
the season in this way usually decor
ate the interior of small collins.
The Citizens of Emporia named
William Dukes Tor street commissions
or, but ne resigned aud now the Re-
pu0licans expect walk away as the
opposition is unable to put up its
dukes.
Cherryvae claims that If northern
men knew that with natural gas in
.he house they wouldn't have to get
up until breakfast was ready even in
mid winter. they would move to that
town by thousands. COffeyville, Cha
mute, Ne0desha, ct al: all who believe
that stand on their heads.
Sabetha Is mad. Trains which
used to stop there for dinner Will
hereafter hustle right through to gain
time, the passengers eating lunches
served on the train, and all that
5abetha will get will be the banana
peels and the egg shells thrown from
the windows.
While hunting burglars at Oswego
last summer volunteer marshal got
bullet in his shoulder from the
sheritf's gun and has now sued for
5000. There are lots of old soldiers
in the State who would like to cash
in the lead they are carrying around
at that rate.
Ramon II. Lala, a Filipino, lie max
ing annexation speeches in New
England Every member of the
Twentieth Kansas brought home
stories about Filipino whom they
called "a lala," but they were all
women. Probably the same family,
however.
The Spring Hill NeW Era stands
up for "SaphO," claiming that any
body who will sit up OF mig hts to hear
some cuss who sings as if he had his
mouth full of mush, tell that "Allah
wantah lisa Myah Blacka Baby
Ba-i-ack," should shy no rocks at
SaphO.
Kansas lie going to celebrate the
Louisiana purchase in 1908, and the
world will have to eXpectOTate FREE
quently or choke when 1t sees with it's
own eyes one county out If one State
of that purchase annually producing
more wealth than the whole original
ly cost, about $1,000 600
Going Down Hill.