The daily morning journal and courier., 1900-02-23

, general pause. Wishing to fill in tn . time to our credit, I called for German l march, which they knew by heart ant which I hoped might serve ily temper ance audience for Haydn's symphony. : Being now initiated in the musica state of my orchestra I kept them play ing simple pieces which they knew, fol
 on that memorable evening they coult not trust to their eyes. was just con : graduating myself upon the success o1 the affair, and we were on the last
 waltz, when the double-bass utterly col
 lapsed and fell to the floor, his big h.
 strument on top of him.
 A storm of applause came from the
 audience; in fact, the performance oi
 my artists that evening would have
 made the most solemn dyspeptic laugh
 The fall of the bass was the finale, and
 we scrambled off the stage, to be fol-
 lowed by Cough, who delivered pow
 erful lecture on temperance. l regret
 to say that we were not re-engaged.
 Another humorous selection is as fol-
 lows:
 Among the listeners was a prominent
 society woman from Springfield, Mass
 She was greatly interested in my work,
 and she suggested that come to
 Springfield during the winter, and give
 a lecture there. She asked me my
 not in the business, and that I invaria-
 bly, made no charge, she was delighted,
 and called my attention to the existence
 of a charity in the city which was
 greatly in need of funds, and proposed
 that tickets be sold for the lecture and
 the proceeds given to this charity to
 which arrangement I consented
 | It was a bitter cold day when I ar-
 rived in Springfield to deliver my we'll
 worn lecture on the Evolution of the | Pianoforte." When I reached the lit
 tie city, accompanied by my son AL
 bert, who, by the way, had been my travelling companion during my pre- vious visit to Vienna, I philosophical with him as we walked up Main street
 upon the fact that it must be very cold day for me when had to come to Springfield to lecture for charity. As the prospect for large gathering gave
 me an icy chill and was fairly shiv- erlng in my boots, I saw, like an oasis
 in the desert. a florists shop and a win dow quite full of beautiful flowers,
 blooming in contrast to the spring
 flowers of the Mikado. As I am fond of flowers, and thinking of what might happen that night when I was to intlict
 upon the intelligent people of Spring field my threadbare lecture on \ the
 Evolution of the Pianoforte," said,
 Albert, go in there and buy some flow CTS for the lecturer" While Albert is generally good son, I was astonished to see him show signs of disobedience and he turned and looked at me in surprised way, as he replied: What do you mean father?-buy flowers for the lecturer?" What I say, my son. Go in there and buy some flowers for the lecturer" and, handing him five dol lar bill emphasized my command by telling him I wanted a bouquet of the incest flowers to be had and that wanted him to pay five dollars for 1t. Albert reluctantly complied with my request, and presently came out with an exquisite bouquet of flowers and wed left for the hotel Now my boy" | continued lat the end of my lecture, when make my closing remark which you know so well-Ladies and gentle l attention you have shown me this eve- ming, ,'-and- which, as you know, AL bert is always followed by polite bow, you must come forward and present me with the flowers'' We rehearsed this several times at the hotel and Albert finally did the thing very gracefully.
 I must credit the good people of Springfield with much charity when I say that, despite the bitter cold night, a large and appreciative audience gathered for my lecture on the "Evolu- tion of the Pianoforte," and I must also credit myself with my foresight as to not being greeted with flowers from them. During the lecture I kept my eye | on Albert, who was wide awake to the of presenting the flowers to me, but as I continued and tried to hold the interest of my audience I noticed with disappointment that Albert had fallen asleep-fog which I could not blame him, knowing that he had heard my lecture on the Evolution of the Pianoforte'' so many times as to pre- fer a little doze to what I had to say Albert did not know that he. snored when asleep, otherwise he would have 1dQ DeIleT ldott tli1i tc leiii e'oi~SP | when I was delivering my lecture on he "Evolution of the Pianoforte," and 90 to my dismay I heard the unmusical sounds of Albert's. snores which were wen more overpowering in their pecu- far rhythms than the soft and dulcet ones of my old clavichords upon which always play when I deliver my lec- ure on the "Fvolution of the Piano. orte"
 The cold and icy winds that wered rowling outside now began in their orce to make the windows rattle midst the spellbound interest of the audience and the unmuscal snores of Albert, the guardian of my fve-dollar ,ououet. I drew near the closing sen { ence of my imposing finale of my eel brated lecture on the Evolution Of { he! Pianoforte,p and as I uttered the ast words, I cast an agOnized glance at cc ,lbert, but he was still in the arms of 1 Iorpheus, dreaming of a snoring ob- ' gato Remembering the bouquet for F mich I had paid five dollars and the | ossibility of it's not appearing in &C., | ordance to our rehearsal. l cried out l my despair Albert! Albert Where re the flowers for the lecturer?" The oy hearing in his dreams the voice of is father, and realizing the hour of my i eed, sprang to his feet, and in the most bedlent and devoted manner advanced