davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08
w.rrrN Ron rHr srrNnAY nrrurrLc.

When Charles Kingsley wrote
For men must work and must weep.
He did not have In mind the conditions Of
st. Louis housekeeping in this last year OF
the Nineteenth Century. A better version
Of It would be
Tor women must weep because men won't work
The season Of spring house-cleaning Is
tust closing now, and 81. Louis fouSekeep-
Srs, with tired backs and spoiled tempers,
arc contemplatHlg a state OF cleanliness
which they know will soon PASS into diEgi-
ness. That. In itself. is discouraging. but
II is not responsible for spoiled tempers.
Men are 10 blame for that.
Hero is the story Of one ST. Louis house,
keeper. who went TO work early In tho
spring to give her hcus. a thorough clean
inr. Her home Ia still IN a state OF up
heaval, In spite OF the fact that she has
dono everything possible to induce half q
score Of workmen who live up TO their con-
tracts and to their profession. She declares
that the men who have had her work in
hand were not supposed to be more than
ordinarily stupid. Here is an instance OF the
trials that beset her. She wanted some
furniture polished and reupi.olstered:
This family armchair, the delight OF the
sitting-roon, needed a new cover. She sent
for Tackit. an upholsterer recommended by
friend on Lindeil boulevard. Tile cnn do
al sorts of things exclaimed Mrs. Lin
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08
TOO MUCH ZEAL, AS
THE TRAMP TOLD 1T.

that II Il were brought under hi notice
wha. hot 'un was on strict duty and
such, that might do q bit Of all hight.
As luck would have IL. he went sailing
yast my box TO get into that particular
building. were after him like knife.
caught him by the coattails. and swung
him round
Come out OF It. says. You DON'T 70
in there without a ticket
"'What are you do.rgT he said, Tn q
director
Director be damned says. Ticket or
outside: shafts all I've got TO think about
I won't have such language here he
said.
Very sorry. SIR George said losing
my head. And then. OF course / saw ia
given the whole thing away. and so did he
He wanted TO know how it was that kn.w
his name IL didn't know he was a direct
or said what could. but I. didn't salts
fy. In one short half hour I was turn.d
or. and told not to show nv face there
again. That's what comes of zeal: that's
what comes OF doing ones strict duty I've
been told that a railway porter once kept
the Prince OF Wales off the platform that
had been specially reserved for him. and
was made head gardener or something at
Sandringham for hts pains: but you can't
depend on u. l was thrown out OF my en-
ployment for doing too much and sincs
then I've had to make my living how I
could Just you think about that. Don't
you overdo IT.
The young tramp said that he had been
engaged as haymsker for some years.
and he Ind never been told yet that 10 was
doing too much. He had been told that he
was not doing enough ar tirnes.
"Ah," said the old man We'll I don't
defend laziness." He drew the battered fe,t
over his eyes. and composed himself to
sleep again.
Il say. mate" said the Younger man after
a pause. 'Here's old chap has spotted u
ard is coming down the field
ANY dog?''
"Yuss"
The victim 81 his OWL zeal pulled himself
to his feet. IT'S likely" he >aic. ''he might
not care about what we've done TO his
stack. And hate dogs"
He went of at a slouchirg trot.
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08

the tim. they reached the first floor the
colcr had evidently become discouraged,
for IL was lighter even than the rejected
paint on the third floor.
THAT will be all right when tho next
coat Is put on insisted Mr.. Okcr.
Mrs. House, keeper had TO go for n plumber
who had left his work half finished and
then disappeared, interview a charwoman.
and finally make a trip TO her butchers 70
ses why he had not sent the roast she
ordered. In all several hours were con-
sumed. When she again looked at her low
er floor paint, IL wss as bad ever. When
asked about IT, Mr.. Oker said:
THAT paint came out OF tho same key.
madam, es that upstairs"
But It ism. right" she insisted, "and
the paint upstairs Is"
at came out OF the same kes" said Oker.
and hs kept saying It with maddening re-
iteration Mrs. Housekeeper had to appeal
to her husband then.
'T hate to bother you" she said to him.
but what can I do? These people refuse
TO obey my orders" Mr.. Housekeeper saw
everybody. and said everything she asked
him to say, and went DOWNTOWN. There
was no Improvement.
utE Z want 10 WOEh lor sHe
exclaimed. when he asked her how things
wers going. They nrs intolerably indif-
fercnt and slow about everything but pre-
senting their bills
A new trouble came. A new excuse was
given FOR delayed work
I'VE can't come to-day, on account OF
IN. strike: on account Of the strike that
work will be delayed" she heard II from
the painter the paperhanger. the char
women. the upholsterer, the plumber. tho
carpet cleaner, the carpet layer; it came
from the shops uptown and downtown.
'tOf course tho street car strike Is q
great hidrance TO business" she said when
her family groaned because ladders and
paint pots stood about. but I can't see
how it can make the men work so very
slew when they do get here. really don't"
Work was shirlSed everywhere. The man
who put down the mating left the corners
bare. and escaped before she could re-
monstrate. The plumber turned tho water
on tho house. and went away. He had
promised to have the connections all right
by o'clock. so that q fire could be made
IN the kitchen range. but he did not appear
until hals 1ast 4 tn fannse Asnk M
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08
NEW OLD JOKES.

From the YOUTHS Companion
rs there any new Joke under the sunr -
asks George Augustus SaIa, an English
journalist and special correspondent, whs
died few years ago.
81 doub' there being one. very gravely."
he answers and tells two anecdotes to sup
port this sliepticisrl.
An Intelligent Greek. who acted as Mr..
Saia's guide while visiting Athens. related
to him as a modern Greek Joe Millerism.
the story Of a lawsuit A deaf plaintif
sued a deafer defendant before the deafest
Judge in all Greece. The plaintiff claimed
so many hundred drachmas for rent that
was due The defendant pleaded that he
never ground his corn at night The Judge,
Ia giving Judgment. observed: "Wsii, she's
your mother, after all, yOu must keep her
between YOU"
when / got home I found" writes Mr..
Sala, this apparently up-to-date triad OF
ludicrous non sequiturs in collection OF
ancient Greek ePigraIns.'
There used to be told story of Sheridan
Knowles the Gramatist. who was a FIRST
rate hand at Irish bulls, meeting one of
twin brothers. and asking him: Which
OF ye is the otherE
Mr. Sala compares this with the story OF
that very ancient Jester, Hierocles:
"Of twins one died; SkOlastikcs. meeting
the survivor. asked MIN: Wa ii you wh0
aied. or your sxetnsTI
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08
A ST. Louis Woman's Experience.

and looked over his parcel OF samples for
, q cover for the armchair.
This is what 1 want" she said. with
her finger on a piece OF old rose corduroy.
"Yes'm," said Tackit.
At the end Of ten days he conde,cended to
return a few of her chairs. The family had
been very patient. and accepted uncomforta-
BILE conditions a matter of course, but
more than a week with but one chair in q
room was tiresome
At length Tackit promised to bring the
armchair.
1T was green corduroy you wanted for
IT," he said as he was leaving.
mo, Mr.. Tackit, no. said Mrs. House
keeper. "old rose"
"Oh. yes siid Tackit.
Another week went by, and Tackit was not
heard from. Saturday evening when the
carpetless house had been put IN the best
order possible, and the family were at din
ner. a humping was heard at the front door.
1t was Tackit. He had t-udCed I'D the
clean steps carrying the armchair Great
tracks of black mud relieved the wilderness
OF the steps. but not Mrs. Housekeepers
feelings. She tried to he patient, however
The armchair was uncovered, and Mrs
Housekeeper contemplated It In despair.
Mr.. Tackit." she said. this is blue: /
told you l wanted old rose for that chair"
Il thought this was what you wanted"
said Tackit lan1ely.
She had been patient for three weeks but
now she turned upon him.
You thought IL was green last week:
now it is blue; perhaps you can get q rosa
color by the 4th Of July"
ynr think
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08
SOMETHING FOR~ASU lLDIERDAY 2
Deviled Lobster. s.*aa


Out the meat from boiled lobster IN
to flakes, then measure; add half as
much fine bread crumbs, juice OF one
half lemon, one tablespoon butter.
pepper and salt 10 suit; NIL the lobster
shell. pour over two tablespoons cream
and bake delicate brown; gaFnish with
the coral and sliced lemons.
Asparagus on Toast.as.sss
Boil the asparagus until tender; then
drain: have ready az many slices of
nicely toasted bread as people TO be
served: put on a platter; butter; place
cooked asparagus on top and ponr over
a sauce made Of one pint boiling milk,
two tablespoons -four. TWO tablespoons
butter. pepper and salt; cook till creamy;
garnsh with slices OF hard boiled eggs
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08
~ THE GAME OF THE ROSE. ~
SocSSSccSc<cec>occ

For a small entertainment where the
guests have a literary bent nothing is
prettier than rose petals" game
particularly adapted to the month OF
June.
Cut the leaves OF an UHruiec tablet
crosswise into slips abort an inch broad
and upon each sl.p write a quotation
about the rose from, some weE-knowa
author Out of rose-tinted tissue paper
fashion rose petals and paste these On
the right-hand side of each slip Of pa
per. When all are finished. place to-
gether to form a huge rose. and sh over
II with some dainty rosewater. Let
those petals intended for the outer part
OF the rose be the largest and gradually
diminish toward the center. Cut strips
OF pale green paper and wrap around
ths slips bearing the quotations. lesv-
ing only the pink petalS showing, ana
you have a veritable green Of summer,
Nth the stem somewhat larger than In
nature, TO be sure, but suitable for TIE
purpose. When the game begins the
hostess holds the rose in her left hand
and with her right piucks petal. roads
the quotation ana hands It 20 the guest
who first names the author. When the
rose is completely shattered the petals
are counted. and the guest who has the
largest number is entitled to the prize
which might be a rose bowl or bou-
quet of real roses tied with ribbon.
Here are few among the many quo
tations about the rose:
Gather ys rosebucs willis We rlzy.-Ssrr'cS
Fair is the rose. yet soon its beauty fades
--Theocritus.
The rose that all are pra'sins
l. not the for mo
Thomas HAYNES Bsyley.
It's the last OF summer
Left blooming alone.
All her lovely companions
Are faded and gone.
Thomas Moore
The rose 10 fairest when I. IL budding
new.-Scost
That which We call . rosa
By any other name would smell - S~ss&
-shakespears.
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08

The hot-water pipes are stationary. you
see" said Mrs. Housek-eper, rapidly draw
ing a diagram OF the range and boiler in her
kitchen. You see. IL you lower the range,
you spoil the adjustment. j don't want to
have to pay a plumber for half a days
work Just to save on the price of zinc
The linoleum man and the hardware man
were to meet next morning. and everything
was prepared. but they didn't come. Tho
knight of the linoleum appeared after lunch
in Apologize mood. but the two hardware
men came not. Frantic appeals by tele-
phone brought them after an hour and q
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08

half and thu range was disconnected. but .
pipe broken Tho plumber had to come after
all. and thu effort to economize was eutile.
MY house is a monument to ineniciency
and indifference" said Mrs. Housekeeper
the next afternoon. she laid her SCARED
and roughened hands IN her lap. the first
time they had rested for weeks. A visitor
was adIniring her nice clean house, fresh
paint and new paper.
1T has taken two months to finish what
should have been done IN three weeks and
It Is only half done now. after all my
trouble" II. L d.
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08
Pineapple Sherbet.4

Scoop the pulp from Il ripe pineapple,
being careful not TO break the shell;
chop the pulp very fine; add 70 Il one
cup sugar and one cup Of water; cook
until tender: then strain: 20 the liquor
add one cup orange juice. beaten white
of one egg and freeze 10 4 mush; when
ready to serve pile ii into the chilled
shell and send to the table on pretty
plate.
The St. Louis Republic. [volume] (St. Louis, Mo.) 1888-1919, 1900-07-08
Sunshine Cake.as.s ,

Eleven whites Of eggs, six yolks. one
teaspoon cream Of tartar. one and one
half cups sranuiated sugar, one cup
flour. grated peel Of one orange: beat
whites stiff and dry; add the sugar and
-four alternately; then peel and yOlhS
beaten till :hicl and heavy; mix quickly
III the cream of tartar: bake in an angel
cake pan for fifty minutes in slow oven;
when cool cover with boiled icing ia
vored with Orange-fOwer water.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1900-03-29

most delightful resort with a small OUT
lay of money, and Its convenience to the
city will afford comfortable spot with
III easy reach of every one. The park
will be known as Finney's park, in hon
or of the donor, whose name will be per-
petuated to the future generations Of
Fort Dodge citizens who will enjoy his
philanthropy and remember him only in
Kindness as they inger in the cooling
shade If the sturdy oaks and listen to
the ripple of the Dies Moines that flows
by their feet Mr.. Finney is one of the
pioneers of Webster county; in fact he
was one of the first to settle in this VII
cinity. "a The matter will be taken
up at once by the authorities with a
view to closing the business features OF
the transfer at an early date.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1900-03-29
IOWA PRESS COMMENT.

And next comes few Marshall
town plotters, remarks the Rockwell
Photographs, after the scalp OF eo-
quent Robert q. Cousins who is daily
bringing fame 10 The. Fifth congress
sional district ard all Iowa. The re-
mova OF Mr.. Cousins from congress
would mean a genuine loss to all Iowa,
1t is queer that some people never
know when they have good thing
The bill passed by the Iowa house re-
quirins the assent of three-fo urths OF
the stockholders of a corporation to do
business is meeting with much con-
demnation. The Dubuque Times de-
clares That such legislation is wholly
unnecessary. The courts Will protect
the rights Of minority stockholders on.
every proper occasion. The corporation.
MAS invented to facilitate business and
not to impede II, The judgment OF the
business nen OF the state Will condemn
this bin. u seems hardly possible tha,
the senate which appears 10 be more
prudent than The house. viii perpetrate
the folly Of passing III
or the coming successor Of the late
Judge Wooison The t>eokuk Gate City
SAYS Mr.. MCPHERSON is an honest
upright. indspendent aud very able
man, AN eSperieneed lawyer, familiar
With the work that wiil come before
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1900-03-29

inspiring leadership is as effective in
winning battles as grape and canister
1t causes confusion and indecision that.
scheme of defense which he devised has
been broken and the work must be
taken up by another. What that may
have involved in the. last desperate Ell
fort 10 stay the British forces had not
been sufficiently developed 10 ownore
than mere outline In the interval of
strategic movements which has come
in the struggle it is supposed that Gen
Roberts is strengthening his lines for
"a great onslaught. and this gave Gen.
Jeuhert an opportunity 10 develop only
in par; his defensive campaign before
death invaded his tent
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1900-03-29
DEATH OF A LEADER.

The death of Gen. Joubert is as Sc
we're blow to the Boer cause as it has
received. AS commanders n-chief and
as the organizer of the forces and de-
fenses against he British he was
largely responsible for the strong cam
paign that was so successfully main
tanned before the turning point was
reached. Following the defeats that
recently came to the Boer standards
the loss of a brave and able leader
must have disheartening effect, for
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1900-03-29

Schenck and in force of character he
WAS not to be compared with Vallan-
digham; but in those days his influence
was greater than all Of them, and his
personality overshadowed either of
them. He was a great orator. supe-
rier lawyer, a strong partisan and. as
Napoleon said of one Of his marshals:
considering the times, he was pre-
cious
Spring cleaning in Des Moines has
the promised help Of the new mayor,
and it threatens to Involve the shaking
Of more than carpets
Four New South Wales lepers have
been treated by the leprosy serum
method devised by Dr. Juan de Dies
ny him to have been successful in d
hundred cases. The Australian doc
Tors, however, declare that after a very
careful test they Were unable 10 detect
any Improvement. and that the disease
continued its progress in the patients.
Pope Leo is growing thinner and
paleI, but hissmind continues Vigorous.
Wagon manufacturers at Racine,
MS. announced an advance of 20 re,'
cent in road vehicles Monday And the
Walking continues u be wretched.
representative Mercer, of Nebraska,
chairman Of the house committee on
pablic buildings ard grounds, is Of the
apiniaii that, While no general public
building bill can be passed at this ses-
sim il Will be necessary to present an
omnibus bill providing Tor an increase
rrialienS already made for public
buidlsiss which have as yet hardly
beer started, 70 offset the rise in build
ing materials. which seems to be even
more marked this s@ason than last.
i''ne ilaiions in the urce lsye upset
tlse calculations Of tiasle sam quite as
nuln a the humblest householder. The
BEAUTIFUL congressional library in
washington IS a monument TO the
sisi~llwa}'tl movement Of prices which
eaipe ssitil the panic u 1893 The esti-
mates and alipropriations had been
made an the higher level that prevailed
IN me Harrison administration, and a
resuif ne engineers had so much lief.
oyer thae they Were able 10 make
Ilarg iataNs in decoration and en-
u shn.crl than would have COM
insnded themselves % congress as an
ortginal proposal.
SIX i skeiy to - up in price, as
there IS an epidemic among the Italian
Iaad Frsnch silkworms. They refuse to
cay asd are dying by nlyriads on their
mulberry leaves.
Monied men in the town Of Early,
a., and ready To furnish the capital
for some capable. reliable man TO pub
fish 2 republican newspaper in that
town. The address % the parties may
be secured b; address lns the T-R. This
is q good chance for some bright young
lnewspaper man to get a start, and 1T Is
hoped that the place Will not long go
begging.
IL chicago over 1000 formal invita-
1 tions Will b issued next week to dis
4 tinguished pswy day guests. Now
ien't scrutiny NJ mails too closely.
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1900-03-29

a good thing she knew SO little of the
real acts. And his citizenship COM
pared favorably with others. One Oh
two business transactions We're shady,
but the world had NOT checked up his
books. Consistent church member?
One thing sure, he never had had to
stand church trial. as Jones had.
What business was it of church men,
beers what he thought? Didn't he go to
church twice Sunday and regularly to
the Thursday evening prayer meeting?
Didn't his name head the list for for
eign missions? And didn't he finally
convince the minister that the widow
business MAS a mistake--just friendli-
ness? And all in all. wasn't he
better man than some others So, after
ALL those Inscriptions We're all right,
unless the spirit scribe got 10 asking
questions after reading them. He
knew others sojourning with him would
also object TO this going behind the re-
turns. And so this spirit rested fairly
Well contented. And his honest opinion
of himself was very much as on earth.
He was really entitled TO those en-
graved lines on the stone.
But the book-keeper, in addition to
his other duties, made practice of
visiting all cemeteries eveay little while
and copying off the new inscriptions on
the new stones over the new graves.
And when the accounts We're checked
up the record read something like this:
spirit No. l02,6o4, remains in Grace
land cemetery, Turned
daughter out of doors, only saved from
a life OF wretchcdness by marrying thu
man her father objected To-, claims to
have been a good hus band. proof that
he supported a grass widow for ten
years and made several business trips
TO New York in her company. Item No.
3: In looking over his books. lind he.
pursued a system Of short weights;
went thru bankruptcy once while he.
had 100000 deposited in New York
banks; also find after he became bank
director he borrowed $4,000 Of the
bank for which the cashier was con-
victed and sent 10 the penitentiary.
Item No. 4: Unnecessary 10 refer to.
church membership; was confirmed
hypociite a sheep in VOLTS clothing;
used his church membership as a cloak
for his nefarious schemes. Below we
find the book Keepers recomnienda-
ltion: Transplant spirit No. lp2.soi thirty
degrees lower
Thus, my friends we can notice few
things First, The worlds opinion Of
| This departed brother. Secondly. his
opinion OF himself while on earth; also
the same after he became a spirit.
Thirdly. a spirit pen sketch of the man
Va h. really, u.l ON earth. And finally
Evening times-Republican. [volume] (Marshalltown, Iowa) 1890-1923, 1900-03-29
A HOBO ATTORNEY.

Mason City Globe Gazette.l
Nelson Wier, the hobo who took Mrs.
j. b. Dakin's watch on the night of
March 10, in in dprance vile. He had a
preliminary hearing before Justice
Cummings yesterday and was held 70
the grand jury. But Sir Nelson demon
strated that he was something of a law
yer himself. When the justice asked
him if he desired to question the wit
nesses he surprised the county attorney
and everybody else. Mrs. Dakin had
said that she placed the watch on the
dresser at > o'clock p. m, and that she
did not miss it till . r. m. Sir Nelson
began his examination. You
'nlaced that watch on the dresser at 2
p. M o. Mrs. Dakin answered in the af-
firmative You don't know that it was
not taken While the ladies We're there"
NO. SIR That's all" An attorney
knows that there is difference in the
penalty for stealing from a home in
daylight from stealing at night. Evil
IDENTITY the hobo knows that. too. When
Hawkins, the jeweler, testified to the
worth Of the watch. Wier put him I'M
der the same clever cross examination,
getting him TO say that the watch to
him was not worth more than $50 His
point here was to keep the amount to
$50 and thus escape With jail sentence.
The grand jury Will next have a try at
him.