Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1900-04-16
WEATHER MANS TROUBLES.
Called Upon In All Sorts of Suits to
Tell How the Wind Blew.

Tell How the Wind Blew.
That was a funny. story about Abe
Lincoln and the old almanac. A wit.
ness in the case testified to seeing
somebody do something with some.
thing else on certain night by tho
light of the moon. Mr.. Lincoln, attor.
ney on the other side, fished out an ad
vertisement for somebody's liver regu
lator and proved the man was seven
kinds of liar because 1t was the dark
of the moon.
Maybe the dodge was not original
with the old rail splitter. but certainly
1t is an important detail in the law
practice of today. The government
weather bureau might well be styled
the Public Witness association" 1t
is everlastingly being hauled into
court. Six cases in January, 80 cases
in the last three terms of last year, is
the record for Government Weather
Observer Connor.
They got him down there to tell what
sort of day 1t was. And he turns up
some funny things, does this grave
young man who is getting bald on top
and who has to mat his hair to cover
his Uranium.
Eyes, sir" he said with never n
smile, looking for all the world as IL
he were sorry 1t happened, "would you
believe it, they had me down there one
day to swear in case what way the
wind was blowing at certain hour Of
the day? And what do you think they
proved by meT'
The observer merely put that ques-
ton through custom, for his face in
converse on matters meteorological Is
tantalizingly inexpensive. what do
you think they tried to prove by me?
A farmer had sued railroad for the
loss Of his barn by fire, he saying 1t
was a spark from an engine did 1t.
The attorney made me prove the wind
was blowing to the north at the rate
Of II miles an hour. The farmer had
proved his barn was on the south"
1t is getting to be regular fad to
get the observer into court. He goes
down to the four courts with the same
resignation that he climbs to the roof
of the Rialto building.
"If there Is "A sewer contractor four
days late in finishing his work, the city
refuses to pay him. He sues, and they
nab me. Yes, sir, they nab me first
thing"
"1'hen what do they do with you?"
what do they do with me? They
make me tell them how often it raned
and how much rain there was on a
certain day and every time Providence
interfered-of course, we have 1t all
down on the record to the hour and the
trace. That Is what they do with me-
There was man putting in n shop
front, a new one, big plate glass bust
ness. He had to have it done ON a
Friday night, but he was still sticking
putty In next morning. Away went
the merchants chance for Saturday
trade, and they went to law. That
isn't the worst Of 1t. They came III
here, the window men did. had tc
trot away down to Independence ant
swear the elements were at work, ant
then the glass man convinced the jury
he was not to blame, but the weather
was"
Contractors make public plunder oi
the government weather bureau. There
is scarcely suit arising over the tim,
clnuse lib any contract made but the de
partment Is taken into court. Their,
Is no getting out of 1t. The subpnn;
Is issued, n deputy sheriff serves 1t
and away goes the dignified slightly
colder ln-wlnter followed by-spring
gentleman.
He has testified in about 20 sewe
cases, IL foundation excavations, ,
score OF plasterlng cases-to prove til,
weather was too cold for the prope
maturing of the plaster-nnd in tn,
case of frozen fruit.
Thus are odd uses found for yer,
matter OF fact government depart
ment.-kansas City Journal.