The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1900-10-26


tor? Johnny-Can't sir Teacher-Cor-
rect. That will do.-Yale Record.
DO you mean to lnsinuate that /
can't tell the truthg' by no means.
It is impossible to say what man can
do until he ries"-Chicago Post.
Always There: Quericus-I suppose
YOU had plenty of fresh things at the
summer hotel? Yes; paint and col
lege-bred Town Topics.
Great Actor-I propose making
farewell tour of the provinces. What
play would you advise? Critic--"Much
Adieu About Nothing. Detroit Jour
nal.
The Philadelphian-Isn' the mud on
this street a trihe deep? Chicagoan
(proudly)-Deep? It is the deepest mud
on any paved street in the world.--In-
dlanapolis Press.
His Bait: Nimrod-Pat. did you ever
catch frogs? Pat--Faith, an Oh did,
sir. Nimrod- What did you bait with7
Pat-Begorry, OF bate 'em with a
shtick.-Chicago News.
Jones-I have been trying to wade
through Browns book. 1t Is vile
thing. but presume there is moral
to it. smith Certainly. The moral is.
Don't read it"-Boston Transcript.
Ethel-That detestable Mrs, Bloom
said that looked thirty. Maud-HOw
perfectly absurd, Ethel (elated)-
Frankly. now, how old do you really
= think look? AIaud-About fOrty.-Tit-
s Bits.
d A country paper has this personal
1t item: Those who know old Mr.. VIII
son. of this place. personally will re-
Of greet to hear that he was assaulted in
ID brutal manner last week. but was not
Of killed. "-Tit-Rits
1t Greatun-Wel. have my new novel
ne almost done. Amicus-Why you
haven't written line of it yet True,
IT, but | know just where l must 90 to
W steal each different thing am going to
no use in it"-Chicago Tribune.
NJ. Yes. baby looks like his papa said
the proud young mamma. Pm sure
he'll have a nose like him. Yes, re-
piled the temperance lady next door,
I'LL you give the little one gin for the collie
nm understand Philadelphia Press.
r Hm Jones-Great Scott! has that man
isco been in an explosion or railroad
um wreck? Brown-Neither; he's a cen
sus enumerator who showed up a
smaller population in his town than II
um lad ten years ago.-Detrou Free Press
His Redeeming Quality: Judge-Yo'
co. were begging on the public streets, AM
Ium vet YOU had twenty dollars in you
rocket. Prisoner-Yes, jedge, ma.
,o u1 not be as industrious as some, y
lum honor but I'm no spendthrift-Ne'
York Weekly.
anu A danger to be escaped: "The Who'll
tate civilized world ought to be int
tain asted in putting down this Chinese N
mers rising" Il should say so. Why. an hi
20 torical novel written in Chinese di
1000 lect would be simply awful India
apolis Journal.
acking Credenee: "Can you belle
cient what he says?" asked the journalist
leans the newspaper man. I'm sorry to
very compelled to answer that question
pro the negative" replied the latter; ne
spoii- as untrustworthy as a copyright
en'iy cablegram. Bazaar.
. a~e Poor woman. She works hard
-, dsv. and then she's up nearly all nii
,olast with the babies" whats the mat
= on. with her husband? Why doesn't
better help herF "Oh! ne puts IN an n.s y
5. 3" agitating for an eight-hour day FOR
workingman. philadelphia Cath
!? Standard and Times.
~, ~ Ordering by the Card: Diner Ito
80 - taurant waiterl-Nhat have you
!, COM FOR dinner? er-Roastbeeffri
wolleu seedchickenstewedlam
Aliens fried potatoes college pudding milk
TO fee5 andcofree. Diner-Give me the ii
Itcures fourth. fifth. sixth. eighteenth and q
I, IS Sn roe teenth syllables.-Tit-Bits.
ed lie As Advertised: Don't you hire
servants at all to keep this hotel el
rightly NV room is in an awful dirty &C
it does tion." complained the victim Of
summer hotel lad" THAT is the
of the windr declared the propr
RED handy. You know We advei
each the swept 10y ocean breezes'
o sGnyy, 3as Advice for Papa: Henrietta. of
by an IN, louisville, says: My papa ooJec
gets in nv admirers sitting on the steps
T imper5; talking with ME until late no.
iasmms- night. He claims that he cannot
stored TO ON account of our noise. What y
ansed 6y rou sdvisef" Advise papa TO sic
innamea the day time.-Baltimore Americ'
IS for any There was vacant seat in tn
Send ior LITTLE Willie allowed the strange
C.,.ao n to take it. although he looked
..Tbank YOU, my little gentleman,
take Llf