davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24

Methods of Making Fun of an In
structor which Prevail Year After
Year.
Ithaca, N. Y, Special to the New York
Tribune.
There are some features of life in the
lecture-rooms at Cornell University that
are certainly amusing to the visitor. In
the preparatory school, as rule, the in
structors find no difficulty in becoming
really funny in the eyes of their pupils.
Whatever the instructor may say the pu-
pills regard it as the hight of humor and
go into commissions of laughter. 1t thus
happens frequently that the preparatory
school instructor comes to think himself
a Mark Twain. II is quite the contrary,
however, at Cornell. There are few good
lecture-room jokers in the university, and
an instructor who thinks himself witty
is a rare specimen. II he thinks himself
a capital joker he has only to appear a
few times before lectureroom of two
or three hundred students, when he will
change his opinion of himself.
The method adopted to rally a profess
sor is novel. If the lecturer attempts TO
say something funny his jokes are hailed
with the most hilarious stamping of feet
clapping of hands, but also with the most
sober countenances that could be mag
ined
This disconcerts the lecturer, and he
tries to quell the levity by vigorously pro-
ceeding with the theme of his lecture
But the cheering is not easily stopped in
such large body of youths who know
how to take advantage of their numbers
1t is prolonged and drawn out until the
instructor resolves, then and there, never
to attempt a joke again.
II the professor becomes confused by
hos a4Tfh ttc fu of hi ha a n
the worst possible mistake. For then the
students can laugh. Everything that can
possibly be construed as joke, or as at
all clever, is hailed with the same sarcas-
tic demonstrat ton. Simple Latin phrases
German words. of stories which were not
at all intended to be funny, but used for
the purposes of illustration, have been
received with the same applause. to the
lecturers utter confusion. Even the drop
ping of an eraser or a pointer on the part
Of the instructor has given rise to as
much clapping and stamping as if 1t was
the hugest Of jokes
The same remedy is applied to a fresh
man or an upper class man who tries to
become the shining light of his classroom
by quickly answering questions put to che
whole class, If a question goes part way
around the class unanswered il is a mat
ter of principle to leave it unanswered,
whether you can answer IL or not. and
tne student VINO FleS 10 snlne Dy answer
ing it when several others of the class
have 'nunked' on it is soon made TO re-
alize his mistake by being obliged to listen
10 tempest of satirical applause every
time he dares to call attention to himself
in this way. The remedy has never been
known to fail. The would-be brilliant stu
dent is satisfied to be once thus heartily
cheered.
"Quiz" days are another source of en-
joyment for the students of the lecture
room. They are especially amusing in the
class of one professor In particular. He
is one of Cornels oldest and most hon.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24
SAVANNAH TO NEW YORK

SAVANNAH TO NEW YORK.
SATURDAY, March a. 1000 p. m.
CITY OF BIRMINGHAM, Capt Burg.
MONDAY, March 26, 100 p. m.
KANSAS CITY, Capt. Fisher, TUESDAY.
March q, 200 p. m.
CITY OF AUGUSTA. Capt. Daggett.
THURSDAY. March %. 400 p. m
NACOOCHEE, Capt. Smith, SATJJR-
DAY. March 81. 500 p. m.
LA GRANDE DUCHESSE, Capt Hanlon.
MONDAY, April ?. 700 p. m.
CITY OF BIRMINGHAM, Capt Berg,
TUESDAY, April 3, 1850 D. m
KANSAS CITY, Capt. Fisher, FRIDAY.
April 6, 10 a m
CITY OF AUGUSTA, Capt. Daggett.
SATURDAY, April 7, Il p. m.
NACOOCHEE, Capt. Smith. MONDAY,
April 9. l 80 p. m.
LA GRANDE DUCHESSE, Capt. Ham
Ion, TUESDAY, April 10. 2 p. m
CITY OF BIRMINGHAM. Capt. Berg,
FRIDAY, April -, p. m
KANSAS CITY, Capt. Fisher, sATUR-
DAY, April "A, 4:30 .. m.
CITY OF AUGUSTA, Capt. Daggett,
MONDAY April IS, $50 D m
NACOOCHEE, Capt, Smith, TUESDAY.
April II, $50 p. m
LA GRANDE DUCHESsE, Capt Ham
lon, FRIDAY. April 20. a. m.
CITY OF BIRMINGHAM, Capt. Berg,
SAIO KDA1. Apfll Il, S.5U a. m.
KANSAS CITY, Capt Fisher. MONDAY,
April % 1870 a. m.
CITY OF AUGUSTA. Capt. Daggett.
TUESDAY. April "a, 1880 p. m.
NACoOCHEE, Capt. Smith, FRIDAY
April 27 $3.50 p. m.
LA GRANDE DUCHEssE, Capt Ham
lon. SATURDAY. April 2S, 4 p. m.
CITY OF BIRMINGHAM Capt. Berg,
MONDAY. April 80, .. m.
SAVANNAH TO BOSTON.
TALLAHASSEE, Capt. Lewis TUES
DAY. March a. 200 D. m
CHATTAHOOCHEE. Capt. Lewis, FRI
DAY, March 30. 400 a. m.
CITY OF MACON. CaPc. Savage, THURS
DAY, April 5. 900 a. m.
CHATTAHOOCHEE, Capt. Lewis.
THURSDAY, April u. $3.50 p. m.
CITY OF MACON. Capt. Savage, THURS
DAY, April 49, 1880 a m.
CHATTAHOOCHEE, Capt. Lewis,
THURSDAY, April &c, 2:30 p. m.
This company reserves the right to
change its sailings without notice and
without liability or accountability there
for
Saihngs New York for Savannah daily
except Sundays and Mondays 500 p. m
Sailings Boston for Savannah Wednes-
DAYS 1900 noon and Saturdays 800 D. m
W. C. BREWER, City Ticket and Pass
enger Agent, 107 Bull street, Savannah,
Ga.
e. w SMITH. Contracting Freight
Agent. Savannah. Ga.
r. G. IRRELEVANT, Agent, Savannah.
Ga.
z. H. HINTON. Traffic Manager.
JOHN NJ. EGAN. Vice President.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24
THE WEATHER.

Forecast for SATURDAY and Sunday:
Georgia. Rain Saturday. Sunday fair;
light 10 fresh easterly winds.
Eastern Florida: Showers Saturday, and
probably on the Atlantic coast Sunday
Variable winds
Western Florida: Rain Saturday. Sun
day fair, light TO fresh north 10 east
Winds
South Carolina: Rain Saturday; sun
day fair; easterly winds. becoming varia-
bic.
Yesterdays Weather at Savannah
Maximum Temperature $3.50 pm. 6 degrees
Minimum Temperature a. m. 81 degrees
Mean temperature ..~....-....-. 81 degrees
Normal temperature ......-..... 81 degrees
Excess Of temperature ...-.-... degrees
Accumulated deficiency since
March ! .............-.......... p degrees
Accumulated deficiency since
Jan. ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS 10 degrees
NalhIaH ......... ....--..'.....-.... I
-NOi maj -......-... .-+-...'.-.-.-.- IL men
Deficiency since March 1 .......l.1S inches
deficiency since Jan. / .....-....2.f7 inches
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24
JACKSONVILLE, FLA.

ored as well as most learned, members OF
the faculty. He Is professor of English
and American literature, and is so wrap
ped up in his lectures and work that he
never finds time to see the funny side of
life His heart and soul will become so
absorbed in his lecture that he is perfect
ly Obvious to all going on around him.
He has no need to enforce discipline, for
his lectures are so truly interesting that
his listeners become perfectly fascinated.
lie will frequently remark in the course
of his readings, Here we have an ex-
ample OF the absolute man." or This
mans mind, you see, was rectified by his
inner self. He was wheeled into a new
orbit" one day is set apart in the term
for "quizzing," when the members of the
class are allowed TO drop into a box at
the professors desk slips OF paper bear
ing such questions as they may desire to
have answered by him,
The opportunity Is seized by the stu
dents 90 puzzle the old man with vague
or ridiculous questions. He will find him
self trying TO answer such questions as
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24

in the biggest poker game ever played
in New York city, perhaps in the world.
Something between 100000 and 81 100000
changed hands in the course Of a week.
The game was on the Chicago limited,
en- route 10 New York, and al the Wal
dorf-Astoria. The players were the mil
lionaire members Of the American Steel
and Wire Company-the Steel Trust.
They played from The time they left Cal
cago, fortnight ago. until they shook
New Yorks dust from their feet week
later
There were six of them. one lost $780,
900 in the week of play, another dropped
$685. 900. a third was 100000 loser and the
fourth was out $4,000. The two winners
took back to Chicago the sum total of
these amounts. What took place on the
train ran the total losses in this stuDen-
dous game to 81 100000.
Every Man Was Game.
There was no repining over this great
play. Every man in it was game to the
core. It was no gamblers game. All the
six men are financiers and conductors Of
great industrial enterprises None of them
will have to curtail his expenses to catch
up on his losses
II was a fortnight ago that the men,
who make the Steel and Wire Trust, de-
eided to come 10 New York from Chicago
on business. They engaged private car
stocked it with the fat Of the market and
the pick of the wine cellars, and had II
coupled to the swift Chicago limited which
reaches New York every afternoon around
.6:30 o'clock.
In the party were Col. Isaac L. Ell
wood. John w. Gates. Max Palm, Col
John Lambert, John A. Drake and several
others Col Ellwood and Col Lambert
run the barbcd- interests Of the coun-
try, and were once on the staff Of Gov
Tanner Of Illinois Mr.. Drake is the son Of
ex-Cov. Drake OF Iowa. and is the treas
urer Of the Indiana, Illinois and Iowa
Railroad Messrs. Gates and Palm belong
10 the steel Wire Trust
Well. on the train a little quiet game
Of poker was proposed. Some Of the crowd
took a hand. A white chip cost $50 and
stack was $1,000. Nobody bothered about
any limit-it was as high as the sky"
as one Of them said afterward at the
Waldorf Astoria
Lost 5000. coo ON the "Trip.
In that twenty-four hours TO New York
the heaviest loss was made. It was $780,
600. The loser must be nameless for
many reasons. Besides, It might hurt his
feelings
The entire party reached New York in
high spirits including even the 5000, 900
loser. They went 10 the Waldorf Astoria
people and quietly intimated that they'd
like one of the old club rooms up on the
fourteenth floor Imagine the disgust Of
the Chicago magnates when they found
that the rooms had been turned into
eleven bedrooms.
Lets play in our rooms, then" cried
one of the big losers, and no sooner said
than dones
The game began each night after din
ner and lasted TIL C a. m. Then all hands
turned in for sleep and then did business.
A nap in the afternoon, bracer or two,
dinner and the game again. This con-
tinued till last Monday when another lin
tied train took their special car back TO
Chicago again.
Smallest ChIp WAS $50.
1t was a simple game. A $50 chip was
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24

who was the first blcyclist who wheeled
into che new orbit?" where does tbe Oh
soiute man abound, and what is his geo.
graphical distribution" and How could
such a man as Guido have a rectifed in
telect, or, was that what was the matter
win him when he killed his wifeq,.
tGuido Is Browning's villain in "The Ring
ana the Book.') The old fellow does his
pest 60 understand and answer these ques-
tons, while the members of the class are
ready to split with silent laughter. he
takes none of these questions as Jokes
but either thinks that they are not clear.
ly expressed or that his class in spite OF
his excellent lectures, have remained a
pack of numskulls.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24
Passenger Fares lTOm SdVaanah.

TO NEW YORK-FIRST CABIN 800.
FIRST CABIN ROUND TRIP, SS2; IN
TERMEDL.ATE CABIN, SIS; INTERAE-
date CABIN ROUND TRIP, S2L
STEERAGE. SO.
TO BOSTON-FIRST CABIN. 500.
FIRST CABIN ROUND TRIP. s36 IN
TBRMEDIATE CABIN, $17; INTERME-
date CABIN ROUND TRIP, s2s.
STEERAGE, $11.75
The express steamships of this line are
appointed to sail from Savannah, Central
C0th) meridian time, as follows:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24
S@'!:qzz!bS!zg
Ocean Steamship Go.
FOR
New York, Boston
AM i
THE EAST.

Unsurpassed cabin accommodate An
the comforts of modern hotel Electric
lights. Unexcelled table. Tickets include
meals and berths aboard ship.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24

Somewhat Mixed. Sunday School
Teacher-"Now, children. what Will hap
pen on the Judgment Day? Willie Wall
street, you may tell me-"
Willie Please ma'am, the
Lord II separate the bulls from the bears"
Brooklyn Life.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24
TRADITIONAL CORNELL jokes.

+ T, Temperature; ~, velocity OF vino
II. b. Boyer, Weather Bureau.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24

River Report-The hight Of the Savan-
nah r.ver at Augusta. at a m. Goth mer-
dian time) yesterday, was 1913 feet fail
Of 2.1 feet during the preceding twenty
four hours.
Observations taken al the same moment
Of time at all stations. March q, 1850, s
p. m, 18th meridian time.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24

the ante, but this was nothing The
smallest, if any came in. was $500, and 1t
was just as apt to be IS, 200. Jack-pots
cost $1,000 a corner a starter. good
hand was worth $4,000 before it's owner
felt like calling, and more than once $2O,-
900 changed hands ona full house.
The biggest pot held $42, 600 1t started
with $5,OOO-$l,0O from each. Three men
stayed when it was opened for 81 900 The
opener took three cards; each of the other
two was content with one.
"A thousand" said the opener. calmly,
for he had caught another king to his
pair of kings.
Make it another five" said the second
man, for he had pulled in the ace of
diamonds to his other four of the same
suit.
THAT suits me-" said the third player.
land We'll put just another 81, 900 to it."
The opener. with his three kings called.
The ace-high flush man had the nerve to
do the same.
How about it?" asked the third man.
laying down a clubhouse. He had caught
another ten 10 his tens and ffves. He
took the pot.
Two Chips on Four Pat Duces.
The biggest hand won two chips-$1O0
The rule of the game was that as six
were playing, it needed three to play or
else 1t was a Jackpot The ante man nut
up his $50 A man with a pair of Fights
came in with another $50. Everybody
else dropped out till it came to the deal
er. He had four duces pat
Another $500 to draw cards." said he.
hoping TO get a raseback.
You win" said the ante man, throwing
down his hand.
MY Fights are not worth $500" said the
other
The biggest bluff that worked won s23-
OO0 1t was another Jackpot.
1t was too big a pot not to be shown
The winner had four clubs and the ace
of spades
This sort Of thing kept up for six
nights.
Not soul could be found yesterday who
would admit that he had played in the
big game. The nearest that any New
Yorker came to getting into the game was
the invitation extended to Daniel H. Reid
president Of the American Tin Plate Com
pany
NO, Stree" said he. when asked ~ no
played. Il was invited to take a hand
but when saw 100000 in a jackpot | CON
cluded that II was too much like gam
bling"
who the Players We're.
John w. Gates is many times a million
aire. He formed the steel and wire trust
and created fortunes for himself and
half "a dozen others
John a. Drake is regarded as the finest
amateur card player in Chicago He is
also known to fame as having been sand
baEged and relieved of s2l 200 by a thug.
Col Lambert and Col Ellwood know
something about the cards. too. but Mr..
Palm isn't so well known Most of the
men are Intimate friends OF Gov Tanner
who no longer plays. The story Of a fam
Gus game in which all hands took part is
stil told.
The crowd had come East for Grant day
in 1897, and besides those already mention
ed young Joe" Letter took a hand. The
game lasted one night, but In that time
$4,000 changed hands. Tanner lost 81. 600.
Elwood, $4,000; Letter, $4,000 and Lam
bert. $1,000. The winners were Gates and
TtraLo
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24

When the stomach, liver and kidneys are tired
and without nerve energy, the body is poorly
nOuriShed, suffers 1aSsitude and pain. Paine
Celery Compound is a medicine compounded to
restore nerve energy,t to strengthen the stom-
ach, liver and kidneys. Read testimonials.
MISS CARRIE G. ATKINS, Sag Harbor N. Y, writes:
For the last two years have been in very poor health
with weak stomach dizzy headaches strength ap
petite and my in such shattered that
could not bear any noise. under the doctors
for long time but did not get WELL One bottle of Paine
Celery Compound has strengthened my very much
and | now feel like another 1t has helped
derfully and advise all who weak and nervous to
use it.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-03-24
MERCHANTS AND MINERS
TRANSPORTATION co.
STEAMSHIP LINES
SAVANNAH TO BALTIMORE.


SAVANNAH TO BALTIMORE.
Tickets on sale at company's offices "a
the following points at very low rates;
ATLANTIC CITY, N. J.
BALTIMORE, MD. BUFFALO, N. 7.
BOSTON, MASS.
CHICAGO, ILL. CLEVELAND, o.
ERIE, PA.
HAGERSToWN HARRISBURG, PA.
HALIFAX, N. 8.
NIAGARA FALLS. NEW YORK.
PHILADELPHIA.
PITTsBURG. PROVIDENCE
ROCHESTER,.
TRENTON. WILMINGTON
WASHINGTON.
First-class tickets include meals and
state room berth, Savannah to Baltimore
Accommodations and cuisine unequaled-
Freight capacity unlimited; careful ham
ding and quick dispatch.
The steamships of this company are APP
pointed to sail from Savannah to Balti-
more as follows standard time):
ITASCA, Capt Diggs, SATURDAY
March "a, at 10 p. m.
ALLEGHANY, Capt Billups, TUESDAY,
March q, at 200 p. m.
BERKSHIRE, Capt. Ryan, THURSDAY
March 20, at 400 p. m.
D. II. MILLER, Capt. Peters, SATUR-
DAY, March 81. at GOO D. m.
And from Baltimore Tuesdays, Thurs
days and Saturdays, at 400 D. m.
Ticket Office 80 Bull street.
NEWCOMB COHEN, Trav. Agent.
]. ]. CAROLAN, Agent,
Savannah. Ga
w. p. TURNER, G. p. A.
A. d. sTEBBINS. A. T. NJ
J. C. WHITNEY, Traffic Manager.
General Offices, Baltimore. Md.
The daily morning journal and courier., 1900-07-23
Trarel1rrs Gnttle.
New York, New Haven and
 Hartford K. K.
June 25,l9O0.

FOR NEW YORK-*4:05, *4.5o, x6:1O. x7:o0, 500, *S:1O, S:9O, "9:S5, x1O.sO a. m., "12:1o, 12:15, *1:3O (parlor car lim- ited), +1:35, 200, *2:30, 800, *4:0O *4:17, 43O, *5:1o. 5;35, 630, *7:1O, ~S:10 S:15 Bridgeport accommodation *9:10, 915 p. m Sundays-*4:05, *4 .50, xS:OO a. m.. *2:3O, x4:So, X6:15, #7:10, *S:10, ss:3O, *s1O D. m.
 FOR WASHINGTON via Harlem 05, %11:50 D. m (daily).
 FOR BOSTON via Hartford and Will limantic-#10:03 a. m.
 FOR BOSTON via New London and Providence-+2:1O, *2:2O, @11:35 (parlor car hmited) a. m.. *12:05 FEAT. *4:o5. "4:55 -s:55 p. m. Sundays-~2:1o, @2:2O a. m, *l2:o5, "4;55, "6:55 p. m.
 FOR BOSTON via sprlngjleld-*1:l xl0:1o. *11:05 a. m., "1:45 s5:5o P. m. Sundays-*1:10 a. m.. "5:5a p. m.
 FOB ABERDEEN. HARTFORD. SPRINGFIELD. etc.-*1:10, GAO, 500. xlo:O3 (to HartforD x1O:10, ~11:05 a. na.. l2os, *1:45. 3:1o, 5:oo, 5:2o. *5:52, (s:15 to Hartfofd), S:0O 10:00. 11:15, (to Meriden) p. m. Sundays-1:10 a. m., 12:08, a552, S:28 D. m.
 NEW LONDON DIVISION
 For New London. etc.-*2:10 .s:no, a:65, 9:3o. 11:05, s11:35 (parlor car nmlted) a. ni.. '12:05, 100 (to Saybrook Junction Saturdays anly) 2:15, +2:47, 1s:2o, (to Newport Saturdays only) +4:o6, 4:l5. "4:55 5:1b. 6:15 (to saybrools Junction), @6:55 9:10 (Guilfcrd acc.) D. m. sunday--*2:1o,' *2:2O, $50 a. IT,, l2:o5, @4:55, e:55 p. m.
 AIR LINE DIVISION--
 For Middletown, Wiilimsntic, etc.. 4r, 0,DO days-7:15 p. m. Connecting mt Middle town with the Valley branch and at Wllilmantic with Midland and Central divisions and c. V. E. R.; at Turner Vile with Colchester branch. NORTHAMPTON DIVISION
 For shelburne Falls, Turner's Falls. Williamsburg, Holyoke, New Hartford and intermediate stations-7:5O a. m. and 400 p. m. For Weetfie!d and in- termediate stations, 5:57 D. m.
 For Farnltngton New Hartford ard polnts this s!de--7:50 a. nl.. 12:o4, 4:oo, 5:57 D. yl
 BERKSHIRE DIVISION
 For Derby Junction. Derby. Ansonia. etc-7:00, 500. 9:33 a. m., 12;O0, 2:39. S:57, 5:S5, 7:5o, 11:2o D. m. Sundays-- S:l0 a. m. and 8:30 D. m.
 For Waterbury-7:0 500. 9:33 a. m. ls;oo 2:39. 5:35 7:5o. 11:20 D. m. Sum- oays-S:lo a. m. 6:15 p. m (via Nauga- tuck Junction).
 For Winsted--7:oo, 9:33 a. m, 2:ss, 5:35. 7:50 D. m. Sundays-8;1O a. nl.. 6;l0 D. m. (via Naugatuck Juncticn).
 For Shelton, Botsford, Newtown, Dan- bury' Pittsfield, State Line-9:33 a. m, 357 p. m.
 For Albany, Buffalo, Detroit, Cincin- natl St Louis, Chicago and the West via Bridgeport a. m.: via State Line-9:33 a. m. 3:57 p m.
 For Lltchf1eld and points on Litchfeld branch (via Derby Junction., 9:33 a. m. 3:57 p. m.
 NExpress Trains xTocal Express.
 c. T. HAMPSTEAD.
 General Passenger Agent.
The daily morning journal and courier., 1900-07-23

ara affected by the prevalent splrlt ol the times They range all the Way lioni concerns that have sprung up lot 'ne nurpose of making webbing TOT iiia- chine-gunbelts to others that ao lotii- ing but make tent pegs. lncldelitaiis tha nanueactvrers of all kinds of con- dansed foods. surgical instruments canvas military harness, pack saddles, broean shoes, medicine tablets, nela glasses, cork helmets, aluminium camp outfits, and a hundred and one other things related to army service, are all enjoyig boom. They are making hay while the gun shines.
 'rrhe makers of electrical apparatus say they could do four times thelr present business if they could only get the hands and material All of them are crowded with orders for war ma terial especially field telegraph out fits, and the two or three houses that make a speciality of portable x-ray plants are in the same condition All the civilized nations are clamoring for them for their surgical departments. A firm that manufactures only insulated wire gave notice recently that 1t could not receive any more orders until Sep- tember l. and could not guarantee de- livery even then,
 "A day or two before I left New York the representative of German steel works was at our office and re- marked that his house had lately closed a contract to supply several thousand spun steel gas cylinders to the British balloon corps. It seemed that they had been successful in turning out an article that had immense resistance to it's weight and could not be duplicated anywhere else In the world The agent said that they proposed hereafter to make a speciality of gas reservoirs for military balloon service. New Or leans Times-Democrat