davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

COckrOach KxItOr is a SUR exterminator fol
cock roaches. beduu2s red ants etc. Sent by mail 70
81. NJ. FRYE & Co. 21S Sycamore St.Mlwaukee Wis
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

A pet robin awoke a farmer in New
Jersey in time for him to brighten away
burglarS
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08
The Swiss Cabinet.

The Swiss cabinet consists of seven
members, each Of whom draws S2400 per
apnum,
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

Fishers FlavOring Extracts are Endorsed
by pure fool laws and the o. S. gor ernment for their
PUTTY and S STRENGTH, A. j. Hilbert Co., Milw
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

wisconsin Hair Grower and Dandruf Cure
A guaranteed dandruff and hair promoter. Send
tor booklet Wisconsin Pharmacal Co. Milwaukee, Wis
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

A lion always places its head near
the ground when roaring.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08
Carriers Ink

is so good and so cheap that no family
can afford to be without it. Is yours
Cortor'c
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

Vegetable Compound
cures the ills peculiar to
women. III tones up their
general health eases
WIN 0verwr0ughf
nerves. cures those
awful hackaches and req
sxEafeS s,aensfFNafEOn.
III does this because ff
acts directly on the fe-
male organism andsasakes
III healthy, relieving and
curing aN inflammation
and dispEacessseRefS-
Nothing else is just as
good and many things that
rssay be suggested are
dangerous. This great
medicine has a constant
record of cure 7hozg~
sands of women testify to
ID. Read their letters c0n~
sfanfly as9ress'issg iss 6ksEs
papers
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

Mrs TKinsIow's SOOTHING SYRUP for children
teething, softens the gums, reduces Inflammation
alays pain, cures wind collie. 25c bottle
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

English bankers in China give native
commercial men name for strict bust
ness honesty.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

You cruel wicked boy, to kill that
harmless, little bird
Il was ius' going ter offer it to yer,
lady, fer ter put de wings in yer collec-
ton on yer headgear.'
oh you generous little fellow. And
they're just the right >shade"'-Life.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

The population of Finland includes
2,527, 500 Russians.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

Good newspapers are printed at the
treaty ports of China
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

We We're spending the winter in old
Fortress Monroe and the small boy of
the family had been cautioned repeated
~ not to drink any water that had not
been boiled, as it was not safe. One day
when something had gone wrong and he
was crying bitterly, his mother called
dheerily to him. Kenneth. do you know
that yOur tears are salt? Catch the next
One and taste itr' Stopping his sobs for
a moment he walled forth in the most
dismal tones: "Oh. no: I'm afraid to-
it HASN'T been boiled. New England
Magazine.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

bound shores of the Pacific: man who
will work fcr your interests, be it gold or
silver. Stand by him, and you will he
assured of victory. Gentlemen of the con
o. Clarissa, | mean-I present for your
consideration the name Of Augustus T..
Blank"
He Was nominated by suffocation,
While the permanent chairman upstairs
raped in vain for indianapolis
Sum-
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

"Clarissa,' said Mr. Blank, bending
lower, Il am here 10 present the claims
of an illustrious and favorite SOMA man
who will do more for woman suffrage
than any other man from the trust-boun6
coast OF the Atlantic TO the Chinese
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

Jasper-'I have hit on a new style
do
Jumpuppe-''W What is your truub,e:'
Iasper-"I can't decide whether TO
write a short story around it or try 10
capture an heiress with it."-Town Top
les.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

A Mysterious Achievement.-"Do you
believe there is such a thing as clairvoy-
ance?" inquired the mattcr-of-fa
friend.
'Well'' answered the man who hes
tates, Il won't say there is any such
thing. But l do know this much: l saw
a man go to a pile of cantaloupes and
pck out SIX. and everyone of them was
good to eat."--Wash ngtoM Star.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

Halls Catarrh Cure
Is taken internally. Price 70 cents.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

His Rowing Expericnce-A Pittsburg
physician who thought Of taking his col
ored servant with him in a projected fish
ing trip Intercepted him as to his ac-
quaintance with aquatics. After few
preliminary questions he asked: Have
YOU ever rowed. James, Only on the
cyahs. sab. '-Pittsburg Chronicle-Telc-
graph
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

a Jesuit priest now in South Africa
writes to the boys in the New York col
lese, where he WAS formerly I; professor:
Nine in the blessed language is dihera-
manwnamgwahela, but this is nothing
10 800. which is mashun anna gduamah-
IA manwana man Gwahela -anamashu
mihamahera manwanaingohale go
akadiheranamanwana haheia.'
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

There was one story about Gov Roose-
Telts recent visit to Chicago that was
told BIZ the governor himself as being the
star incident of his Western trip, re-
lates an exchange.
The day l arrived. on my way West .
said the governor, lone of my callers
was a citizen of Joliet, who was slightly
the worse for imbibing. but his manner
was so original and SO funny | couldn' t
resist listening to him. He made a short
political speech and then he paid me two
or three compliments. He talked about
the Cuban war and bear hunting, and
finally he said: Governor. we are anx-
ious TO have you make a speech liz Joliet
when you pass through on Sunday
night
Il told him l would not make a speech
there.
We'll, we want to see you, anyway
he said. 'There'll be big crowd down
at the depot TO see you
Il told him / would be glad to see the
citizens Of Joliet. and babe him goodby.
'Goodby, colonel he said 'Goodby.'
Their, lowering his voice, said i'll the
most confidential tone you could imagine:
The boys want to take a band down TO
the depot. governor and if you'll lend me
$50 III see that they get It,
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

He-"l know your family does not like
me, but-will YOU be my wife,
She-'Well. | SHOULD sly not,''
He taken -aback)-"Whew. That's
She.I repeat | should say not but
as a girl in love doesn't generally do as
she should. III say yesr'-Catbolic
Standard and Times
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-08-08

Trouble Coming.-Citizen- What's
up?''
Policeman-"Oim knockin' fur help.
an ringin' fur an ambulance.
Citizen-"What's the natter"
Policeman--"Oi just saw two Oytai-
ianS smilin at tn same woman. New
York Weekly.
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07
NuBs OF KNOWLEDGE.

Abyssinia has telephone line 200 miles long
connecting the capital and the important city.
1t was constructed by Franco. Russian company.
Queen Victoria never reads any documents or
letters, except from her immediate family, I'm.
til they have first been looked over BY her sec
retary, who has charge Of the royal correspond
ence.
Maize is the principal crop grown in Queens.
land, and also forms one OF the most important
products OF New South Wales, but the climate
OF the other southern colonies is not suited to
its growth.
Government house, Cape Town, tho official
residence OF Sir Alfred Miner, is a very unpre.
tcntio,1 looking old structure, strongly contrast
ing with the parliament house and several other
nna public buildings In the capital Of Cape
Colony.
The rcgalia worn by Washington as Mason
IL owned In 0oodland, Kan. It consists Of an
apron and baldric and is the property Of j. 4.
Smith. He inherited 10 from an ancestor, to
whom it was given by John Robin Macdonald.
More people over 100 ycars old arc found in
mild climates than in the higher attitudes. Ac.
cording to the last census OF the German empire,
OF population Of 55,0OO,00O only seventy-eight
have passed the hnndrcdth year. France, with
a population Of Ao.OoO,Ooo has 2is centenarians.
Minnesota is the greatest Of all the wheat
states Last yenf her wheat fields covered near
" 100000 acres, and she grew upward Of 49,
ooo,OOO b,lshels-more than twice the entire pro.
duction OF the continent Of Australia, and more
than that Of Great britain and Ireland.
The latest available statistics Of the operation
OF tho postal savings system in France was 1895.
Wien s.5'o.ooo accounts were handled and per
cent. was paid on S143, ,O00,0 900, beside leaving
profit Of Sl10.0G0. The management cost 0.45
per cent. Of the mean amount Of deposit.
Paris has the largest library in the world. It
contains upward of 2,OO0,OOO printed books and
100000 manuscripts. The British Museum con-
tains about 1.50O.0oO volumes, and the Imperial
Library at st. Petersburg about the same num-
Der. These are the largest libraries in the world
A proposal to hold an international exhibition
III Sydney New South W., in 1901 was made
recently by the premier, in order to give mem-
bers OF the lower chamber an opportunity'of dis
cussng the matter. After good deal Of dis
cusson the motion to hold such an exhibition
in that year was defeated by vote Of A. to II.
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07

w = H1LE IN the country gem
\N orally people will be
glad, now that election
is over, to give politics a
rest, there is one place where it has
only just begun. In Greater New York
an election for mayor is near at hand
and that 1t will be a warm one is clear
ly indicated in the following significant
paragraph conspicuousy printed in
yesterdays New York Sun:
I'm this great city there begins to-
day campaign that must wage for
twelve months to come with a consum-
ing and destroying fire. Richard Croker
has been saying on his banners that
we must remain a free people, We
must. We must be free of Richard
Croker! 1t is to be a. campaign of the
people for a new public life for cleanli-
ness, for decency and for honesty. New
York must be redeemed. Life itself Is
not more necessary to us than the
honor of our city, and today we enter
upon the struggle for it's redemption.
Seth Low must be the next mayor OF
Greater New York;"
Those who remember the bitterness
with which the Sun fought Low three
years ago will marvel at the complete
ness of its reversal; but the fact is
that in this matter the Sun only fol-
lows the better sentiment Of the me-
tropolis. The audacity of Tammany;
the unrelieved frankness of it's alliance
with vice and its brutally contemptu-
Gus disregard of morals and of ordin-
ary obligations Of political decency are
forcing another revolution, which Seth
Low is peculiarly we'll fitted to lead.
The changes in the Empire states Re-
publican politics since Theodore Roose-
velts entry into the executive chamber
at Albany have been many but in none
has the tendency toward the substitu-
ton of high principle for mere personal
preferences been more marked than in
the Platt organizations acceptance of
Seth Low as the appropriate standard
bearer in a new battle for civic redemp-
ton.
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07

E>E" IuedL Ill Tie eQuCatlOn1
~ life of our country is about
4 "A to be introduced in wha:
is known as the Ruski7 Hall
movement. an idea imported from OK
fprd university in England. 1t is based
Oh new lines of university extension
and contemplates the carrying of
higher culture to millions now by
poverty or other means debarred from
easy access to it.
The plan Of work to be adopted by
the chief promoter, Mr.. Walter Vroo-
man, who has established headquarters
in the University building. Washing
ton square. New York city, includes
four distinct features. The first con-
templates the establishment in suit
able localities, one in each state, of
residence colleges, where, upon pay
ment of 500, students may get four
years course of instruction, condi-
tional upon performing certain man.
ual labor for the benefit of the col
lege. 1t is proposed to have farms
and other industries conducted in con-
nection with these colleges, the profits
from which are to help defray the eX-
penses. Each pupil is to work on
these farms or in these Industries five
hours day. just long enough. it is
calculated. to keep him in ft physical
condition.
The second feature consists in the
establishment in the various cities Of
branch colleges where classes Of
tweRtJ}or more workingmen may meet,
aft ~ tleir days work is over, and get
instfActfon from special lectures at
SO a week. All study is to be done
outside Of working hours. The in
tent is to use the best talent avail
able in the selection of lecturers.
The ird feature is correspondence
schon, essned to furnish instruction
to students living in country districts
and not able TO reach any of the
classes or schools. In it's curriculum
is to be taught all the branches COW
cred by an ordinary scientific school
together with additional courses in
sociology and science Of government.
The fee is to be only 20 cents q month;
ana when hese nail pupils can come
together inNsmall clubs. lectures will
be furnished at cost the hope being
eventually td get volunteer lecturers.
men of means willing to give their
services freely as is done by the lee
turers in the Peoples college in
France.
The last feature aims to secure in
course of time an endowment fund of
100000 to be given as loans to 1000
young men whoYcannot afford to pay
the 500 each necessary to secure
four years course in residence coll
lege. To insure repayment on this
loan 1t Is proposed to take mort
gage on each borrowers character.
As he rerays. the NOR ey is to be re-
loaned and used over and oyer again
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07

~Y EVERY prompting of JUS
tice and fair play the adj
ministration of William Nc
. Kinley was entitled to the
magnificent Endorsement 1t has re-
ceived: and right here we wish to go
on record with the assertion that 70
per cent of the citizens who voted for
Bryan in their hearts believed so and
now that election is over and party
tension is eased will frankly say so.
When we look back upon the condi-
tions which prevailed at the time Of
Major McKnley's first election, OBJ
serve the steady improvement in busi-
ness which followed. recognize the
fidelity with which campaign pledges
have been redeemed and appraise fair
ly the splendid achievements of execu
tive policy both in peace and in war
which have characterized the four
years of his tenure of the chief magis-
tracy-achievements which have lifted
tliG prestige Of the American nation
and people to the highest point in his
tory and brought about the tacit recog-
milton by all foreign powers of Ameri-
cas- prinacy among the nations-it Is
not surprising that the people have
conspicuously recorded their verdict of
approval; the surprise is that any man
or any party should have reflected
upon their good sense by assuming a
contrary possibility.
The verdict is a demonstration Of
American intelligence; it is new
proof of the efficacy and adequacy of
democratic institutions. BY it the
demagogism which would set class
against class, base hope of preferment
upon the engendering of fictitious dis
content and in a great emergency of
national responsibility resulting from
unexpected consequences of war for
humanity play the game of back
firing IN American soldiers and of
coquetry with national armed foes for
the paltry purpose of gaining tenn
porary partisan advantage has been
rebuked most wholesomely. If the les
son of this rebuke shall be needed by
the opposition party the chance will
arise for honest divergence over lines
of future administrative policy. If not,
the rebuke will be repeated as often
as provocation shall recur.
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07
Riley's Story of the Twins.

n LIVER HEREFORD repeats with great delight
story James Whitcomb Riley tells about
twins, relates the Washington Post These par.
ticular twins live near Mr.. Riley out in In
dianapois. Once not very long ago one Of
them was naughty, and to punish her the
mother made her stay indoors all day. To add
a keener edge to her disgrace, favors We're show.
cred on her sister, Sister was dressed up in
her very best. Sister was given new paraso,
and went prancing proudly up and down the
front walk in the greatest glee. Presently one
Of the neghbors came by, and paused at the
gate to speak to the child.
'You're one Of the Brown twins, aren't your"
asked the neighbor
"Yes'm," answered the little girl.
(which twin are you?' the neighbor in.
quired.
The child gave her skirts proud toss.
"Oh." said she. complacently, "Im the good
little twin that's out walking"
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07
TOLD OF wpII-xNowN MEN.
Three Stories Of Lord Russell.
From the London News.

FROM LOnuon NEWS.
One day, a legal correspondent
writes, before the late Lord Chief
Justice took sick, he was sitting In
court. when another barrister. leaning
across the benches, whispered, RUS
sell, what's the extreme penalty for
bigainy?" 1.-TWO mothcrs-in- law
instantly replied Russell.
On one occasion Lord Russell went
to help the Liberals In u certain cam
palgn. lie began his speech of set
purpose with some very badly pro-
nounced Scotch. After the confusion
caused by his apparent blunle mad
subsidized, Sir Charles Russell tas h,
then was) said: "Gentlemen. I do
not speak Scotch, but vote Scotch"
Tremendous applause followed, where-
upon Sir Charles proceeded. land I
sometimes drink Scotch" With this
his hold on the audience was secured.
Although unrivalled in the art Of
cross examination, on one occasion he
was distinctly beaten by a. witness.
What is your age?" he asked. rs
1t my age you are asking?" replied
the witness. Yes, sir. Now, speak
up and be exact" "And be exact.
Well. of all the -" 1.-The court does
not desire to hear any comments OF
yours. Tell the court your age"
Well" said the man, II celebrated
my twelfth birthday last week."
Don't trife with the court, and re-
member you are on OATH" TITS quite
true. i was born on Feb. 90, in leap
year, and my birthday only comes
ono in four years"
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07
Governor Thayer's Joke on Bryan.
From the Cleveland Press.

From the Cleveland Press
Ex-Governor Thayer of Nebraska
participated in what w. ]. Bryan
thinks is the best joke on himself in
his career.
Bryan took AN active part in the
campaign in which Governor Thayer
was elected, as a Republican, by about
10000 plurality. He made fifty speech
es against Thayer. Consequently,
after the election, Bryan was not cer-
tain just how Governor Thayer felt
toward him.
AT II st. Patrick's Day celebration
In Lincoln Governor Thayer was Aput
down for an GRAFTON. Governor Thayer
aid not have n printed programme,
and depended upon the secretary OF
dNlc organization to tell him the
parts as they came.
The programme was varied, there
being speeches, recitations and songs.
When Bryan's number was reached
the secretary leaned over and whis-
pered i'm Governor Thayer's ear "W.
j. Bryan"
Governor Thayer arose and Bryan
advanced toward him. The former
seemed most cordial. and 1t pleased
Bryan to think that the Governor was
not harboring any malice because of
those campaign speeches made against
him. Governor Thayer shook Bryan's
hand warmely, as he askel, softly:
"Do you sing or speak?"
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07
La Fargo and His Coupe.
From the Philadelphia Saturday Evening Post

fipHi tHe HiiduciPhia cd'uluiy i.NcHlne Iost.
John La Fargo. the artist, who lives
at Newport, has all the eccentricity
that is said by the wise to be a part
of genius. The late Bishop Brooks, Of
Boston, was very fond of La Fargo
and they We're excellent friends, but
he hit off the latter's eccentricity in a
single sentence.
Bishop Brooks and friend We're
coming out of a church where the
artist was decorating a great window.
The friend walked toward a handsome
coupe that was standing in the rain,
and said: II suppose this Is your car
riage, Bishop?"
Dear me, no." said the bishop, IT
always walk. That's a livery carriage
waiting for La Fargo"
But La Fargo" said the. friend,
has been working in the church all
day, and will continue to work until
night"
II know" said the bishop. his whim-
steal smile drawing the corner of his
mouth; but La Fargo can never work
very well unless he knows he's keeping
carriage waiting for him some-
where"
The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1900-11-07
High Glass Music Under Difficulties.

From Musical Enterprise.
Henri wieniawski, the famous violln-
list, whom some older readers may re-
member having heard in this country,
while making a concert tour in Russia
with his brother Josef, noted piano
player, had some peculiar experiences.
The two brothers were to play in a
large town in the interior and wished
to see the hall in which the concert
would take place. They were conduct
ed through mud and snow to a large
plank hut, which had been used for a
circus, and on entering found nothing
but bare walls.
And is that where we are to play?"
asked the brothers.. "There are neither
benches nor seats"
"Oh, that makes no difference" re-
piled the marshal. "With us every one
brings his own seat"
YES" answered the musicians, "but
what about lights? There is not Il
lamp in the room"
That's nothing, either" replied their
companion. with us every one brings
his own lantern"
Having learned the simple manners
of the country the musicians asked how
the concert was to be advertised.
ooh, that's easily arranged" an
swered the marshal. Its true we have
no printing press, but will have a
servant write the announcement in
large letters on the door, and it will
spread through the town fast enough"
A man soon appeared with a pound
of chalk and began writing on the
plank door. The brothers were some
what detected, but the marshal assured
them that everything would be satis-
factory.
Toward evening all the inhabitants
We're seen flocking to the place of per-
formance, each carrying in one hand 4
seat and in the other lantern. The
house was crowded to overflowing. The
mother Of the performers was present,
and, seeing the rain and snow dropping
through the roof on Henri while ha
played, she was greatly disturbed.
my poor son! He will take his
death of cold!" she murmured half
aloud.
rs that your son, little 1nother?"
asked kindly old man sitting near
her, and, vising, he shouted to the
young violinist: PUT your fur coat
on!" Then turning to the audience he
said: His mother, who is sitting near
me, fears he will take cold.'
Other voices at once repeated the
Put on your fur coat!
Put on your fur coat"
Henri paused and thanked them for
their permission. but added that he
could not play in fur coat. "That
n, n lsac M 1iffaroncotv crioI
audience. Put it on! Put it on!"
He did as he was hidden, and played
rs best he could, so ncumbered.