Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1900-10-07

toner. In one week he brings me So
worth of work.
.Vheil, ~cobbler," he says, Il hat read
| of you in der papers und vhas glad. !
! suppose you Will now live in some
| brownstone fronts und hat a swelled
c~arriage?"
Eyes. I like to do dot" I says.
"Und l like to speak to you about our
schurch. We vhas going to make re-
pairs, und now dot you was a rich
mans, you Will gift $500"
But l can't did it," | says.
No? You mean dot you don't like
to gif up some money TO der Lord aft
er your good luck. You can buy steam
yachts und diamonds und race horses,
but you can't help der schurch. Well,
sir, you vhas a villain at heart, und l
vhas sorry | ever bring you work.
Good day, sir, und may dot steam
yachts explode nit you!"
My wife cries when dot man goes
AWAY. und | feels weak in der knees,
but another Teller ONE in. He vhas
full of peesness. He hat a book und
pencil, und ne says:
Hello, cobbler! So you hat struck
luck at last? All %right-all right. /
like you to put down $40 for der hot
air fund for poor shildren."
But how can l do dot?' I says.
What! DO you mean to tell me dot
you can't spare $40 out of $3.50, 900!
by Sneorge, you vhas a sink of a
man if you don't did it! Dis vhas no
AWAY, und we like to get dot hot air
ready. hand over und quit foollng."
/ couldn't .di- it. of course, und ..e
calls me bad names und kicks oaf-
err der wa.er pail. l trembles all oafer
when he vhas gone, und my wife says
we shall be in two ~poornouses before
Sunday. l almost haf some tears In
my eyes when a womans comes in. She
vhas old und lame und poor. She
takes me by der hand und says: s
"Cobbler, l rejoice init you. You
vhgs a good man, und | vhas glad or
our luck. May der Lord open your
heart to help me get a new wooden
leg. You can easily spare me go!
but l can't do it, | says.
Then make 1t SIS"
II can't make her f~eefteen cents"
DO you mean to say you won't help
me get some new teeth"
Il can't do 1t.
What, What! Der Lord brings you
$3.50. 900 in a lump, und yet you won I
elf A. dollar to help Aunt Sally buy a
new wooden leg und some teeth! You
don't mean dot you vhas sooch a VII
lain as dot?"
INV dear womans, q gcan't spare no
money-not a cent" -,
Den you vhas some unhung Villain,
md Will see dot no respectable peo-
ples speak NIT you! Villain! Mlser:
Rase liar, May heaven deal NIT you!
Dot vhas awful, but before | can
shed some tears a policemans comes IN.
He smiles und laughs und winks und
says: >.
''Vhell, Dutchy, you hat struck 1t
rich. und / congratulates you. BY
Sheorge, but $780, 600 in cold piunks
vhas all right! vhas a leetle short
dis month und like to borrow $500
from YOU"
But l can't lend him." l says.
Make it $50, then"
q can't did it,"
"Vhell, l try to get along NIT $50, but
my family Will suffer"
Il can't lend nopody 5 cents"
What! What! You vhas rolling in
gold, und yet you go back on der po-
licemans ON your beat? My dear sir,
do you know what you vhas doing?
Don't you buzz saw NIT some mon
keys! Gif up."
Il can't
Den dot p%olicemans takes me by der
neck and jams me around until he
wrecks my shop und almost kills me,
und when he gets tired und goes AWAY
he says:
Il shall be back in two hours, und If
you don't hat dot money ready, you
vhas gone up some spouts.'
l vhas bruises all oafer, und my wife
faints AWAY, und so l lock up der
shop, und we sits in der back yard for
three days und IFS on onions.