davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1900-06-16

market was steady at prices that have
existed for some time The quality was
not extra, but only common The offerings
changed hands at unchanged prices. the
closing being quiet, with all sold. Quota
tions:
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
He Cot the Fifty

At the expense of himself a certain
fashionable Philadelphia tailor told the
following story yesterday. Quite recent
ly a man went into his establishment and
told him that Mr.. SO and SO, promi-
nent customer lin full standing) had said
that Mr. Tailor had several misft suits
TO dispose of and as he needed new
suit immediately he thought he'd like to
look them over. One was found to fit
him perfectly and he took it at the price,
500. But" he said. Mr.. Tailor, l have
not enough ready money to pay you and
must have the suit Now. do you know
Mr.. Pancake, the Chestnut street confec-
TONER? Well" on being assured that
Mr.. Pancake was also a customer in good
standing, he owes me some money, which
he has promised to pay this afternoon,
and if YOU are agreed | will walk over
there with you and ask him to send $50
of it to YOU" Such a proposition and the
radiance of bad suit could not be over
looked, and when they arrived at Mr..
Pancakes shop, without preliminaries
the man said: you know that hun
dred you promised to send me to
New York, Mr. Pancake? Well, just
send fifty of it to Mr.. Tailor and the 9th
er fifty to the address / gave YOU" That
afternoon Mr.. Tailor received a neatly
done uD package containing fifty beauti-
full cream puffs.- Philadelphia Times.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
The Worlds Copper Supply.

Of the copper mines Of Importance in
North America today, those of Montana,
Arizona and Michigan are in the front
rank, and Rio Tinto, in Spain, stands
practically alone in Europe Owing to
interminable lawsuits, Butte's production
is not increasing, but rather diminishing,
and in Michigan, notwithstanding the
investment of enormous capital in the
opening up of new mines, the increase
in production is small. The greatest in
dividual copper mine in this country, if
not in the world, is unquestionably Sena-
tor Clark's United Verde indianapolis
News
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
A BIT OF HUMAN NATURE.
Neither Husband Nor Wife Could
Read the Programme.


1t occurred at the opera house, and he
morbldly clings to the idea that the en-
tire audience knew just what happened,
says the Detroit Free Press. He was
there in good form, his wife looked the
highly genteel without appearing conspic-
uous, and he was entirely satisfied with
the FAMILY representation until he wanted
10 KNOW the name of a very pretty and
fascinating soloist. He held his pro-
gramme close to his nose, held it at arm S
lengtn and held it at all intermediate
points.
100 bad" commented the matronly-
looking woman on his right to the young
can't reads
Isn't it? And he has bright face,
too, Probably self-made man."
Ihey had whispered. but a good deal
stage singer, and he heard. He blushed
until his hair itself was a light red, and
turned half way about to address his
wlfe: WHO is the woman we are listen
ing top
How can tell? l have on my far
be before we came"
That's nice, isn't it? We don't know
how many acts there are, we don't
know where the scenes are laid, and we
don't know one person from another.
Which is the star?'
Can help you?" asked the good-na-
tured matron to the right still under the
impression that he could not read. She
went straight on telling him the name
OF the opera, the fimsy plot that carried
it, where the scenes were laid, and was
just dlscoursng upon the soloist in a
way that was unconsciously patronizing.
when the wife broke from suppressed
jealousy into speech:
He can read all well enough, madam.
He's a college graduate for that matter,
and L can read in several modern lam
guages: but he's proud and 63. That's
al! there, is to it. Put these on and she
vigorously produced a pair of nose
glasses. Il wonder if you'll ever have
any sense
He donned the glasses and looked silly.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
GIVING A BALL IN A FLAT.
Crowded-Out Guests Made Use of &
Neighbours Apartments.

Crowded-Out Guests Made Use of a
Neighbours Apartments.
On the occasion of the Christmas fetes
M. lie Comte and Nine. lie Comtesse de
Kersabili Of good Breton nobility, gave
q grand ball in their superb fiat in Rue
st. Petersburg. The comte and comtesse
completely forgetting the dimensions oil
their. drawing rooms. had issued 600 in
VltatlonS, and every one was accepted
All the doors were thrown open and the
dancing began. Soon the gallery and the
dining room were invaded, and then the
bedrooms, the doors of which were indis.
creetly forced by the Suffocated guests
Some sat on the beds and others ate ices
on the corners of the toilet tables. The
late corners could not get in at all, but
greatly amused by the indescribablc tu-
mutt they cOntented themselves by re-
naming on the staircase which led from
the first to the second floor
Among others, one could see Mime. de
Rothschild, IN most curious toilet OF
turkeycock green panne embroidered
with emeralds ana sappnires, a diadenl
made of the same two stones on her
head, comfortably installed on one step,
and talking with her usual wit with a
gentleman friend who sat q step lower.
The crowd continued to increase I'M
tll at last a certain family of rich Bra
lillian 'rastaQuOueres" who occupy the
second floor, and had not been invited,
in spite of the advances they had made
to the comtesse, saw their way to exc
cute vengeance on their proud neighbors.
Suddenly their Wallets, in fine liveries,
opened the doors of the fat up above,
and the guests of the Kersabiis, half
stifled, and not exactly knowing what
they were about, fiocked into the cherry
colored drawing room of Nine. Lasia-
Marquee, which was brilliantly lighted
with a hundred pink electric lamps, and
found the most acceptable shelter under
the palm trees and tropical plants. Half
an hour later the guests of the Comtesse
which was a greater success than the
one below.-New Orleans Times-Demo-
crat
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
A Useless Drink.

Frederick Villiers, in his letter about
Magersfontein, relates this incident: AT
ter the battle he came on some of the
wounded enemy. THE Scandinavian in
command had a bayonet thrust through
his stomach and was dying. He signed
to me that he was thirsty. | lifted him
up and gave him cup of condensed
milk. A wounded companion lying by
his side said, in very good English: It's
out ou of Of the s hole " in his s Stomach This
was true, but still the poor fellow had
the sensation of the refreshing draught
passing down his throat 1t was his last
drink. | can see his eager, hungry look
even now, and, though an enemy, / wish
] could have done more for him. A few
hours afterward he was buried by the
side Of the heroes of the Highland bri-
gade. London Leader.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

A decrepit cid negress with a deformed
back and few discoored fangs in the
place of teeth called one day upon a gen
tleman who had been her employer and
announced, Mistah, Pse gwine ter git
nerried.' Get married, auntie.' ex-
prised; isn't the change little sudden
YES, tol'able sudden; but bettah late
than nebber." ''Oh, wellT' answered the
friend, politely, "a lady is never too old
to marry | supposed she falls in love. >
But Use not fallen i'm lnb.' ~Going TO
marry for money!" sarcastically. "Yis,
sab, dat am de solemn troof. It's money.
Use gagged ter Billy JONES' why,
Rilly's only %, and you must be 45.''
''Yis. sab, dat's so; but Use now payin'
Billy $40 yeah for rent an Use gwine
ter marry him ter save dat ermount"
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
Kentucky Lingo.

Here is a little dialogue that recently
occurred between two rural members of
the Kentucky militia which brings out
some curiosities of dialect:
We've bin ordered TO Frankfort.
I CAD, ] hain't goin'n'
Il CAD, you hev to go!'
Il hain't, and there's lots more that
hain't goin', nutherw
Il CAD, youns swored you'd go! We
hain't got no uniforms and we hain't got
no guns and we hain't goin'. nohow.
We NEST friz last time and didn't git
nuthn' to eat!''
WELL mebbe youns won't go, but if
youns don't you'll git found like hell!'
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02


Ohio Family.
Hon. Dan. A. Grosvenor, Deputy Audi
tor for the War Department, in a letter
written from Washington, D. c., saws:
"ALiOW me to express my gratitude
to you for the benefit derived from one
bottle of Peruna. One week has
brought wonderful changes and am
now as well as ever Besides BEING
one of the very best spring fonics ir is
an excellent cafarrh remedy" Very
respectfully, Dan. a. Grosv.nor.
Hal Z. Denton, Chief National Exnort
Exposition, PHILADELPHIA Pa. writes.
Il was completely run down from oyerwork
and the responsibility naturally connecred
with the exploitation of great international
exposition. My physician recommended an
extended vacation. When life seemed AL
most burden l began taking Peruna. and
with the use of the fifth bottle / found nv
self in a normal condition. | have since on
'oyed the best Of health
Almost everybody needs a tonic in tho
spring. Something to brace the nerves in
VigGrate the brain. and cleanse the blood
That Peruna will do this is beyond all 0ues-
same experience as Mrs. ID. W. Timberlake
of Lynchburg. Va, who in recent letter
made use of the following words: II ALWAYS
take dose OF Peruna after business hours
as it is great thing for the nerves There
Is no better spring tonic, and l have used
about all of them
For a free book ON Summer Catarrb
address The Peruna Medicine Co, Column
bus, Ohio.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
SPINNING WHEEL.
THE IDEAL NEWSPAPER.

[Charles NJ. Sheldon was entrusted with
the eGitorship Of the Topeka Daily Chronicle
for week. He was to edit it entirely ac-
cording to his own ideas. The experiment
has proved an unmitigated fiasco.-Da1ly
Paper,
When | took the Press, as middle-agel
man,
(Said I to rnyself-said ~
I'll work on q new and original plan,
(Said | to myself-said H.
I'll cut out the columns of crime and di-
y0rce,
l never will mention the name of horse,
And the betting we'll stop as matter OIL
course
(Said to myself-said -
Then politics, too, are ephemeral things,
(Said l to myself-said ID
And so are the doingS of Queens and Kings,
(Said | to myself-said ID
And war is SO wicked that | will refuse
To print in my paper who win and who
In short. I'll abolish all manner of news,
(Said l to mySelf-said -
But III fill up my columns with temperance
facts,
,Said l to myself-said H.
And temperance meetings and temperance
tracts.
(Said l to myself-said H.
And, as for my leaders. no grave u. ID.
Can write better sermons, as you will agree
While ia each little par, 10! a text there
shall be,
{Said ! to myself-said II
London Punch.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
Try Grain-O: Try Grain-O!

Ask your grocer today to show you a
package Of GRAIN-O, the new food
drink that takes the place of coffee.
The children may drink it without injury
as well as the adult. All who try it like
it. GRAIN-O has that rich seal brown
of Mocha or Java, but it is made from
pure grains, and the most delicate stom
ach receives it without distress. One
fourth the price of coffee. 15c and 25c
per package. Sold by all grocers.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

are toothpicks made of walrus whiskers,
vast quantities of which are shipped
from Alaska to Europe. Those who ship
them pull them out one by one with spe-
cial tweezers. They are used principally
by the weather. classes in China and
Russia, and are also beginning to come
into favor in the most noted clubs in
London.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
THE CHEAPENING TELEGRAPH.
Once Ten Words to Chicag go Cost $2.O5.
Now Forty Cents.

1.-The increase in the use of the telc-
graph for business purposes has been ac-
companied by a steady reduction in the
cost of messages. When the first Allan
tic cable was laid the price of twenty
word message between London and New
York was $780, or So per word. Now
the commercial rate between the two
cities is 25 cents per word. To tele-
graph ten words from Chicago to New
York in 1866 cost $2O5. Now it costs 40
cents.
''Telegraphing to distant parts of the
world is still an expensive business. The
rate per word for message from San
Francisco to Auckland, New Zealand,
for example, is $2.87. From New York
to Manila the rate is $245. The charge
is not always in ratio to the distance.
The rate from New York to some South
American or West Indian ports is nearly
So per word, but in reaching these points
the messages travel twice across the At
lantic.-Ainslee's Magazine.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
Ask Your Dealer for Aliens Foot
base

A powder to shake into your shoes. 1t
rests the feet. Cures Corns, Bunions,
Swollen, Sore, Hot, Callous, Aching,
Sweating feet and Ingrowing Nails Al
lens Foot-Ease makes new or tight
shoes easy. Sold by all druggists and
shoe stores, 25c. Sample mailed FREE.
Address Allen S. Olmsted, lie Roy, n Y.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
SIS Per Week.

a salary of S1S per week and expenses,
will be paid to man with one or two
horse rig to introduce our Poultry Com
pound and Lice Killer among Farmers.
Address. with stamp, Acme Mfg. Co.,
Des Moines, Iowa.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
STATE OF OHIO, CITY OFToLEDo,
IIICAS COuNTy %

Frank J. Cheney makes oath that he is
the senior partner of the firm of f. j.
Cheney & Co., doing business in the city
OF Toled0, county and state aforesaid, and
HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every
case of Catarrh that cannot be cured by
the use of Halls Catarrh Cure.
FRANK j. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in nv
presence, this 9th day Of December, A. Il.
1856
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
What Do the Children Drink ?

Don't give them tea or coffee. Have
you tried the new food drink called
GRAlN-O? 1t is delicious and nourish-
ing, and takes the place of coffee. The
more Grain-O you give the children the
more health you distribute through their
systems. Grain-O is made of pure
grains, and when properly prepared
tastes like the choice grades of coffee,
but costs about a as much All grocers
sell it, 15c and 25c.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Sir Henry Irving has one hobby that
is Il good thing in its way The titled
English player has a hoI$or of empty
boxes and during his engagement at a
playhouse insists that these shall be kept
filed. With his own wide circle OF
friends the trouble of keeping the boxes
crowded is not such difficult one as is
the question of who TO invite.
When asked some time ago his reasons
for filling the boxes Mr.. Irving observed:
Il notice too frequently that the audito-
rum is literally packed, while only half
Of the. boxes are occupied. TO me Il
well-filled theater with empty boxes
looks like a beautiful woman minus two
or three of her front teeth
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
SAUvE QUI PEUT,.

Whom a woman would destroy, him She
first makes glad.
The higher the pinnacle ON which you set
your love, the more easily it will top
pie over.
man may look and see nothing; Il woman
often sees without looking.
To make love is easy; attempt to lTnmake
it if you would know true labor
Warwick James Price in The Smart Set.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
Cotton for RaIIoons.

German army authorities are now ex-
perimenting on cotton stuff as a materi-
al for balloons. 1t IS treated with rub
Der before being used The fabric is
said to have great strength, and is bet
ter than silk, which is apt to generate
electricity.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Gov. Steunenberg CT Idaho IS phys
ically the most impressive governor in
this country. He is far over 6 feet tall
and of herculean figure.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Piso's Cure is the best medicine we
ever used for al affections of the throat
and lungs.-Wm. o. Endsley, Vanburen,
Ind, Feb 10, 1900.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally
and acts directly on the blood and mucous
surfaces of the system. Send for testi
monialS, free.
+. ]. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
Sold by Druggists, 75c.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Senator Platt of New York dimes out
less frequently than almost any other
member of the Senate. He is fond of
ings over book
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
The Makers Of Carriers Ink Saw:

I'VE can't make any better ink than
we do; we don't know how to. We can
make poorer ink. but we WON'T Car
ter's Ink is the best.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Mrs. WinslOw's SOOTHING SYRUP for CHI r.
feething. softens the gums reduces inhammd ton.
allays pain, cures wind collie. 25c bottle.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Miss Ella Little, an American, has
received a doctorate at the University Of
Heidelberg, 'summa cum laude' This
is the first time the distinction has fallen
to a woman.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

ply was: Regret. Leeds also FULL A
third cable came: Try Newcastle"
Young Kruger goes to Newcastle and
there sees lift go down the shaft of
mine empty TO bring UP a lot of men to
the surface. Rushing off to the tele-
graph Office he cables:
Stop the war, grandpa; they are
bringing up men from the inferno
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Bishop Doane of Albany. y. T.. j,
preparing to make visit to the PhiliD
pines somewhat similar to that Of Bish0y
Potter
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

congressman John Davis of the
Fifth Kansas district has gone totally
blind. He was one of the founders of
the Ponulist party and served two terms
in Congress-
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Sir Walter Besant is the latest Eng
liSh author to announce that he is CON
slderlng a lecture and reading tour III
the United States
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Mrs. John V. l.. Pruyn OF Albany,
\. Y. owns several specimens of the
handiwork of Paul Revere as a silver
smith.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

The output of the Cripple Greek dis
trict for the first quarter of 1900 is close
to S2,500,0O0 monthly.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Bishop Walsham How, like the moth
ers of Pierre and Thomas in the Bah
Ballads" was "of decent size. though
not particularly tall" He gives his
height as feet 8 inches. but on his first
visit to AlmOndbury to preach, the YER
ger came to him in the vestry, and said !:
Ave put platform in t pulpit for We !;
you'll excuse me, but a little wan looks
as if he was in a toob''
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Gen. Luke Wright of the Philippine
commission will be accompanied to Ma
Mia by his wife and daughter Katherine.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

May-''Do you play poker, Frank :
I'm sure papa will never permit me to
marry you if you do
Frank-"Rest easy on that score, dar-
ling. / sat in game with your father
last evening and soon convinced him
that / couldn't play. Harlem Life.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Mrs Choker-"Oh. yes, indeed. He
leads a regular dogs life with her.
Mrs. Gaussippe-"R Really? | can hard
ly believe that
Mrs. Choker-"She's petting and kiss
ing him all the time. Philadelph a
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

The other day horseless carriage,
working by steam, was putting its nosy
way down Queens Gate, watched by two
lid e>5" ''of no Importance. AS it passed
the pair one contemptuously tossed her
head and remarked well, when ! rodes
| likes to roide-I don't want to squirm
on no bloomin' tea-kettle.' Westminster
Gazette.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Charley, dear" said young Mrs Tor
kins. Il want to 90 to the races again"
what for?"
ut will be rest after you and father
have been talking finance, as you do by
the hour. want to hear about g to s.
and 5 to 3 and 10 to L and all the rest
of them anythin, in fact, except 10 to
J. I'm so tired, Charley, dear of hear
ing the same numbers over and over
again.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

or. A. w. GLEASON
Notary Public
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

At the Country Postoffice-Summer
Visitor--"Is it true that the postmaster
is supposed to read all the postal cards
that come through the Officer"
The POstmaster-'I s'pose so; but it's
mighty hard 20 read some of 'em. City
folks are glib enough at talkin', but when
it comes TO writin' they can't come up to
the boys in the lowest class in our coun-
try schools. boston Transcript.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Mrs. "Roger?"
Girgle-"WelI?'
Mrs. CIRCLE" Something tells me I
may die before / wake
Glrgle-"Oh, go to eep"'-Harlem
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
AN APRIL MOAN.

IT'S SPRING, When All prOspccIs
Unhappiest seem
Too warm for ones fiannels,
Too cold for icecream.
Washington Star
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02
What is puzzling the telephone compa-

What is puzzling the telephone compa-
MES is the uncertainty of their justitica-
ton in cutting in SO as TO dlsconnect
two lines engaged in conversation. at the
request of a third party. The Cleveland
Plain Dealer gives a case in point: Sit
ting at his midday meal ia his club q
lawyer bethought himself of an impcr-
tant matter concerning which he desired
to communicate with his office without a
moments delay. He has no business
partners. so that no one was entitled to
the use Of his instrument other than his
employees. When he first called up the
line was busy. Within the next five mir
utes he called up four times more, each
time to be met by the same reply. Then
he called for the chief operator, to whom
he stated the case, but was informed
nothing could be done until the line was
clear. Next he appealed to the general
manager himself, who recognized the
voice Of the lawyer, understood the situa-
ton and ordered the connection made as
requested. When the lawyer cut in he
overheard a mans voice talking to his
stenographer. which in a moment re
solved itself into the wrathful question
What the d dye mean by talking in
here? Get off the line"' Well, he didn' /
get off the line, but that stenographer is
busy now hunting another job. Still, tho
telephone companies are fairly powerleSS
to stop this sort of annoyance, in the
absence of assurance that the man who
insists upon cutting in is the proper per-
son and lessee of the instrument.
The Washburn times. [volume] (Washburn, Wis.) 1896-1976, 1900-05-02

Merchant-'I think I'll have to fire
Polk. He's frightfully lazy
Friend-"Slow in everything, eh?
Merchants no. not everything
He gets tired quick enough. "-Philadel-
phia Press.