Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1900-05-29

he unbuttoned his collar and took off his
cravat, and next his shirt came over his
head. He was about to slide out of his
trousers, when several women shrieked
and he awoke with start. HIS trousers
were dangling about L feet rs he ran
down the aisle to the vestry. An usher
handed him his cloth ng and he pat it Oh
and went home.
An Usage Indian named Laborng
Miles came before Indian Agent 'olack
q few days ago for some medicine, re-
lates an Indian territory correspondent.
AS it is a rare thing for an Indian to ask
for white mans medic me- the agent
said: Sick, Laborng?'
Sick, heap SICK" replied the redskin.
Pretty near die" replied Laboring, at
ter pause. Looked UP in sky. Saw
big light; saw Jesus and Jesus mother"
The Indian then said his father beck
oned HIM TO come up into the Clouds.
You ought 20 nave gone advised tie
agent. MAY be you won't be called
again"
The Indian shook his head.
Don't you want to so to heaven:'
asked the agent.
'Not now" said Laboring Miles. Il
want to XII one heap ID Indian before
l 60"
servant man.
why, here it is replied the man
whose prosperity had slipped a cog or
two recently.
But that SILVER one ne one YOU
used to carry had a handsome gold case
'Well-er--circumstan alter cases,
you w''-Philadelphia Press.
-:o:--
Ideal and Real.-The man she dreams
about-About so years Of age, feet
tan, very dark, very commanding, prince
clean shavcn. bright, witty, intellectual,
athletic. native New Yorker, college
graduate. money-not considered
sized slightly gray ana inclined 70 bald
ness, upper teetn ialSe' Htoolo-SRouldered,
mustache ana minister's Invalid chicago
man, mlluonalre-1ht lconoclast IN
Town Topics.
TO-
Missionary WAS if LIQUOR that
brought YOU to this?, Imprisoned bur-
rlal-"No. sir: II was house cleanin'-
Eth? House cleanng?" Burglar
''YeSsir; the woman had been house
clcanin'. and tn stair Garnet WAS ND. an
tn folks heard me. New York Weekly
-:o:-
=, -,
Two chiidren' one IL Il boy SAILOR SUIT,
e e o'nel III ilt,iG checheu WOODEN
l[cch, were aGcosted 10y an interested
er %. on the sidewalk.
Hoou morning, chiidreh' sald the
l ldus' auuieSs mem VITA sliil!e, as
game of hop-scotch. are vou brotbaI.
and sister. nIayinp Ga nicefv to@etbn,
orr as she saw somewhat distressed
and agprieyed ovnreSsion ON tho faca Of
the child in the frock' are Won both
hoys?"
Eve aren't relations REPLIED the 9th
er child ''and I'm a boy now. and Tom
my's going TO he one neyt Vol u,bop
he gets his new suitr'
von,r Iris, lad on arlot ~ :,
tached to a cart. and had his arm round
the neck of the animal when two recruit
ing sergeantS passed One of them. i'm an
endeavor to be funny. said: What are
YOU hugCins YOUR brother 81 tightly for?''
Cause" was the reioinder. II was
afraid he'd list
-:o:-
discussing the amount of fortune of their
lived about sixty years ago. Och, he's
very rich. intirely." said one. He has
hundred quarter. maybe?" 'sArrah.
90 on wild yer hundred a quarter said
the other. He has hundred n week
DO YOU tell me SOP exclaimed the first
labor"r. An / niver saw him drunk
yet as long as he Is comm here
-:o:-
While tba lata Jomes IT po.rd fatl,or
of Dam Rnard Tho artist W., ,io;n+;ni
r,ortrai+ of Zachary TayIor bn LA :"
him. 'i' "e ''''u ~
We'll general 7 sunnoso Won oro 70 ho
orr next President y, ''ie - 0'
Il hone NOT. rrl,nted the bIuF old boro
presidential chair. but if they offer it to
me, | suppose I'll be fool enough to ac-
cept 1t.
And he did.-The ArgOnaut.
-:o:-
ooh. we had tbe loveIiest ARRANGEMENT
at orr church society Iast weal,I E;verv
woman contributed 70 tho m;ssinno,y
cause Is. which She earned herself jy
hard work, ..Hcw did Won cot yours p,