Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1900-04-04
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YES. s.'-Detroit Journal
Mrs. Grill-Oh, dear! I've sung 20
this baby for an hour. and she hasn't
stopped crying yet Mr.. Grll-Proba-
bly, she has been waiting for you to
stop.-Tit-Bits
Not to BE Caught t-"Theres n boy
wants to see you, sir" ''llas he got
bill in his hand?" NO sir" "Then
he's got 1t In his pocket; send him
awayr'-Punch.
Foozle--We don't call them "bunk
ers' over on our links now. Tee-No.
what then2 Foozle-They're so hard
to get over we call 'em "kopjes. BAL
tlmore American.
Frayed Feeter-Bil says he kin re-
member de time dat he swan In lux
ury. Torne Tatters-Yes; he fell into
a beer vat once while applyin' fer job
in n brewery.--Judge.
Clara-They say Nell is going to mar
ry IA man old enough TO be her grand
father. Maude-ls it possible?
didn't suppose there was a man living
that old.-Chieago News.
Llverled menlal--Me lud, the carriage
waits without. Lord Ftz Josher-
Without what? Llyeried menal-
Without horses, me lud; it's an auto
moblle.-Chlcago Record
The Deacon-Oh, Lord. eff dis yere
chicken be stolen we hope you will
oberlook de fact. fo' it's almighty
small, almighty tough, an almighty in-
adequate TO go 'round.-Life.
Shea married couple should pull to-
gether like n team of horses. IIe-Yes,
and they probably would II, like team
of horses. they had but one tongue be-
tween them.-Chicago News.
Miss Pallsade--I caught Miss Pan
handle listening to the music at the
opera the other night. Miss Summit
Well, you know she has never had
many social advantages.-Life
Sure They Are Beautiful She-Men
are more conceted about their looks
than women. He-Proye It, She-Men
always put their hats on without look
ing in the glass.-Chicago Record.
The vexed Question.-Trainboy-
Scribner's, Harper's the new Cen
tury- Old Gentleman (waking up
Nonsense 1t won't be the new CEN
tury till next year!-Harvard Lampoon.
Practice Makes Perfect.-Clerk-You
can't get these boots on. You should
try a size larger. 'Rafferty-Niver do
yez moind. Oill be able to git thin
on afther OF wear thin toim or two.-
Chicago News.
"What is the difference between the
state of Massachusetts and Ken
ucky?" "Give it up, Colonel" "Massa-
.husetts produces boots and Shoes and
kentucky produces shoots and BOOZE"
Washington Star.
Kipling's model: The tramp-Will
yer gimme something ter eat, lady?
The lady-You forget to say please"
The tramp-'Scuse me, ma'am; yer see,
I'm the original absent Minded Beg
garv'-Town Topics.
{ Mrs. Qui-Vive-Dear Mr.. Surplice,
can't make up my mind what Lenten
sacrifice will be the most acceptable.
| Mr.. Surplice - All! - OIL = well - dear
madam-suppose you give up trying to
| run the church.-Life.
| Jones-Curry Is an awful unfortunate
| fellow. Jackson-That so? Jones
| Yes; he snores so loud that he always
! wakes the baby, then the baby cries so
loud he wakes Curry, SO they have to
| walk together.-Tit-Bits.
/ A modern test: Hes q very great
| man." said the awe-stricken young
/ woman. "Oh, l don't know" answer
4, Miss Cayenne; IL haven't seen any
! magazine articles written by him about
i himself" lf."-Washington Star.
J The Slmon-pure Article.-Percy-
! Have you ever loved before? Edith
No, Percy! l have often admired men
j for their strength, courage, beauty,
/ intelligence or something like that; but
i with you, Percy, it is all love-nothing
/, else!-Puck.
Hard on George: Weary-W'y amt
i, youse got no use fer Washington
+ I,eary-I don't like de front part Nv his
! name; an, anyway, anybody w'ot dis
! played a fondness fer chopin wood at
+, sich an early age hez my profound con-
!, tempt.-Judge.
"What is your waist measure ?" asked
her dearest friend. "Really, I've for
gotten" replied the demure little maid
! en-. For a moment she was buried In
thought. Then, turning to her escort
she asked: Harold, how long Is
mans arm, anywayT"-Chicago Post.
Mrs. Smyth docking up from her pa
;. per)-What does it mean in the Wash
ington news when 1t speaks Of "the
lower house," Mr.. Smyth-That meani
the House Of Representatives. The
Senate is higher. Mrs. Smyth-How Il