davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
MISSOURIANS BUY STRAWBERRY
TREES.

A story comes from Troy, this state.
sketches ever written by Samuel l..
Clemens, Missouri's distinguished
humorist. Those who have read Mark
Twain's funny productions may reme,n-
Der the remarkable things he wrote for
a certain newspaper while 'subbing''
for the agricultural editor, who went
away on a vacation. Some of the good
people of Troy should read the sketch
referred to. 1t will make them let the
anger they feel toward a s~lick-tongued
tree peddler hGiling from New York
state melt into the smiles it's resem-
blance to their own experience will pro-
yoke.
The Deddler came to them last fall
with what puTported to be a new
fashioned strawberry, which he averred
grew on bushes from four to ten feet
high. AS a proof of his representation
he exhibited pictures of the fruit bush
covered with fat red Strawberries each
as big as a hictory nut A number of
the Missouri Trojans bought and paint
ed these strawberry trees, full of faith
and nope. and when they sprOuted out
last spring they turned out to be
catalpas.
Several Troy people know more now
than they did formerly about botany.
and also about human rascality. One
of the conclusions they have bly
formed from the latter class of know
ledge is that in the art of pulling the
wool over the ewes of the trustful the
gold brick man, the lightning rod agent,
ana shell game operator are mere
amateurs when compared with the
strawberry tree" peddler-Kans.s
City Times. -
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
OVER THE TELEPHONE.

"Hello, Central!"
"Well?"
"Give me Buzzard's Bay and connect
me wit hthe cottage of Grover Cleve,
land"
"There you are!"
Hello. is this Mr.. Cleveland?"
Eyes; who calls?"
This is Mr.. Bryan"
Good morning, Mr.. Ryan"
mot Ryan! Bryan! William Jennings
Bryan"
80, I see. good morning."
"Mr. Cleveland. when viii your letter
indorsing me for the presidency be
ready?"
90. yes. Mr.. Bryan. The fish has been
biting finely. I've had a most enjoyable
summer. Thank you for your interest.
Good-by."
Rings off.-Pittsburg Chronicle-Tele-
graph.
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17

After years of such incessant effort you
attain to the highest dignity in the pos
SibilitieS of the American citizen. And
here and there may be one wise enough
to say, hat you owed it largely >to your
Wife. I should shine dimly with reflect
ed glory. You would be commander in
war, head of the state in peace: | sup
pCsedly would hold interviews with the
housekeeper and the chef"
Yet a wcman's place is the home"
You cannot generalize about women.
A Woman's place is the home when a
home is her sole ambition. 1t is not my
ambition. L meet every day the men
whom L should meet as your wife. 1
know them. Do 1 cajole, f~ascinata,
scheme, persuade, fatter? The New York
Star rushes from it's laundering presses
500, 600 copies per diem, which go through
the hands of more than two millions of
American readers. Do 1 seek these men?
Am L subservient? They seek me and
they are subservient. My telegrapher
lays his finger on the key and waits for
me to bless or blast. BY Diane! l COM
manI!"
And when you grow old, childless, and
lonely?"
Il shall not grow Old. Age has no ter
Ibf lOf tue newspaper IOlk. 1t waits Tor
few of us. To live, borne forward ON the
full tide of force; to pass early into
~blackness and be remembered of no man;
that is our destiny, and we are content;
at least we have lived; and, as the dying
siourrnand said about his dinners, even
God cannot take from us the thing we
have been and the things we have done"
You are astray," he said. Il feel, I
know that you are astray. Yet you must
decide for yourself"
II am the master of my fate. 1 am
the captain of lrsy SOUL" she responded,
steadily.
But, when all is said. what is it that
you so hate to resign?
Il will not. / cannot resign the know
ledge that L hold within the hollow OF
my hand the owe to thrill the ma
tons"
The hoofs of the horses were ringing
upon asphalt now. Soon he man and
the woman were bathed in the lights of
the great, garish hotel. She sprang light
iy out. He leaned forward and asked
earnestly:
1--WE are still friends?"
She smiled up at him brightly, still
with alert face, steady, capable gray YES
and %resolute hin.
Unit you say or do something con-
trary to the policies of the Star" she
said.
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
STOVES USED BUT LITTLE.

Few houses in Uruguay are provided
with stoves for heating purposes. No
chimneys or fireplaces are provided as
d rule, one house recently built at a
cost of $14, 1000 having for it's only CHM
ney a stovepipe from the kitchen. Cattle
Craze in the open all the year round, but
during the winter season, from April to
October, the dampness is conducive to
the spread of pulmonary troubles. Only
one dealer in Montevideo sells heating
stoves, and these are of American make.
Oil stoves find some favor, as coal sells
at from $40 to $14 per ton.
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
THE ONLY SURVIVOR.

An American dealer not long ago made
Especial trip to White Bay, New Zeal
and, for the purpose of procuring a kind
Of lizard called the ''~si;henodon.' which
is regarded by scientists as q wonderful
curiosity. as it is the only sur
vivor of an ent;reorder of reptiles. all the
other genera and species having long
since become extinct. The lizard, which
is known to the native Maois as the
"tuatera" is about a foot and half long.
and, oddly enough. seems to have affin-
tiles with the crocodile.
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
CONFESSION.

w been oratin' on finance
Oratin' strong an true.
/ never miss a single chance
To say a word or two.
But if you ask me-. frank an free,
Jes' what l mean to show,
TO tell the truth, 'twixt you and me.
l honestly don't know.
I make predictions right an eft,
They do not cost a cent
I give advice of wonderous heft
About the government.
But if my words are coming true
My weighty words of Woe
To tell the truth, 'twixt me and you,
l honestly don't know.
Washington Star.
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
SOLDIERS AND HORSES ALIKE.

Spanish officers say If they had as good
horses and mules, the horses for cavalry
service and the mules for bearing bur-
dens, as the Americans have in the Phil
ippines. they would have captured
Aguinaldo long before Dewey captured
Manila. But the Spanish horses. like the
Spanish soldiers, We're half starved, in
different to fighting and long journeys.
and thereby forfeited every claim to the
slightest atom of equine glory.
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
MAKING HIS EXCUSE.
From The Washington Star.

From The Washington Star.
Henrietta said Mr.. Meekton, there
is one request which I should k to
make Of YOU"
What is it,"
IF I get to acting a little bit over
bearing don't notice 1t. At any rate.
don't hold it up against me. You see.
every once in a while I get to thinking
of the fac that 1 am Henrietta Meek
toms husband, and l can't help feeling
just a mite naughty"
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
HIS FIRST

The studious young Japanese had &C.
CURED his knowledge of the English AN
guage chiefly from books. His first at
at writing a poem in English took
this shape:
A Board of Trade plunger
Who suffered from hunger
Bought a cake made of ginger
And a moment did linger,
Then he said,
A she paid:
"Here's your fees cheesemonger,
Thou see I'm no sponger.
Wha a dairy lunch lounger
I'd be was I younger.."
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
THE ONLY REFUGE.

Commonplace Young Man q ion of lie
lustrious family)-'Hi. there! Don't you
point that thing this way"
Camera Fiend-"It's no crime, I guess,
to take a snapshot of anybody"
Commonplace Young Man.-"It is to
take one of me. Tn copyrighted"
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
AS TO UNCOOKED FOODS.

The giants of old-their relics with "
We latter-day pigmies may view.
The dinosaur ate his comestibles raw,
And see how the dinosaur grew!
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
REQUIREMENTS OF HEALTH.

The requirements of health can be
counted on the fingers of one hand. They
are: Good air. good food. suitable cloth.
ing, cleanliness and exercise and rest.
Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1900-11-17
On the Cabin John Road
BY II. s. Garfield

'Sess><>s <;>ss s,s:s,. :ss:<>>s<s, <<ss<<,,ss>><s
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1900-05-06

We a lady Pfced
grade all over townand she could do four dollars better
here than at other
That's the kind OF compliments wanthere must be quite
passing around for business growing These marked
special
GRANITE INGRAM CARPETS
Special Price, 29c
CARPETS Vue,
Special Price. $50
WOOL INGRAM CARPETS patterns value ..
Special Price, ACC
SUPER ATWOOD patterns
Special Price, SOC
PATENT ATWOOD fuu
Special Price, 79c
TAPESTRY plot patterns
Special Price, $50
WILTON VELVET CARPETS border Value $500 w
Special Price, 75c
ADMINISTER CARPETS, thirty patterns
Special Price. CSC
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1900-05-06

NOTTINGHAM LACE CURTAINS long, uslwdth.v
Special Price, SOC Pair
SCOTCH CURTAINS yards long, Three styles to select
FROM white Value, S.25
Special Price, Csc Pair
long 81 ms wide Value
Special Price, S1.19
quality LACE CURTAINS yards Value
Special Price, Sl.98
MARIE ANTOETTE EFFECT ID border Value, $3.50
Special Price, $3.50
LACE CURTAINS ~ yds long, 81 inches wide Value
Special Price, S395
BRUSSELS POINT CURTAINS, yards long,
so Pair
IRISH POINT RENAISSANCE ID 45 inches wide
S13 so Pair
IMPORTED BOBBINET CURTAINS handmade
edge yards long,
S0.95 Pair
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13
THE LATE GEN. HENRY.

General Henry was one Of the typi-
cal officers of the regular army to
whose lot it had fallen to serve the
country through these three distinct
military periods. He believed in the
American army as having work to do
for the country, and his whole life had
been given without finching to what
ever part might be assigned him.
There are some other officers of the
regular army who, like General Henry,
fought brilliantly though the whole
Civil War, then gave long, selfsacri
ficing years to the hardships of the
frontier and the perils Of Indian fight
ing, and were still in service to play a
part in the recent war against Spain.
But the very thing that in the time to
come will make these men the more in
teresting to Americans studying the
history Of their country will be the fact
of their comparative lack of popular
recognition during most Of the long
period of their arduous service.
We have not been military nation.
The country at large has paid but lit
tie attention to the army since the Ci-
vii War. Yet West Point has gone
steadily on, turning out each year a
class of The best-trained young officers
in the world, who have added, more
over, to their military training the
qualifications of patriotism and high
standards of duty and honor. 1t is a
great thing to have such men, and
sooner or later their value comes to be
known.-From Guy V. Henry-A
Knightly American" in the american
Mnthy RevieU Of Rerieus
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13
BETTER THAN WEALTH.

Many man is rich without money.
Thousands of men with nothing in
their pockets, and thousands without
even a pocket, are rich. A man born
with good sound constitution, good
heart, and good limbs, and pretty
good head-piece, is rich. Good bones
are better than gold tough muscles
than silver; and nerves that flash fire
and carry energy to every function
are better than houses and land. 1t is
better than landed estate to have the
right kin ol father and mother. Ed
ucation may do much to check evil
tendencies or to develop good ones.
The man is rich who has good dispo-
sition, who is kind, patient, cheerful,
hopeful, and who has flavor of wit
and fun in his composition. The hard
est thing to get on with in this life is a
mans own SELF A cross. selfish fellow,
desponding and complaining fellow,
timid and care-burdened man
these are all born deformed on the in
side. They do not limp, but their
thoughts do.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13
5elrtt Misfellunq.
After Clouds, Sunshine.

"I'm clear discouraged, mother,
said Mary Fairchild, throwing down
her agents outfit and sinking into a
chair. The books slipped out of the
shiny water proof satchel and fell noisl-
ly to the floor, revealing some pages
of Life of Washington and some pic
lures in another volume, entitled The
Housekeeper's Guide.
"No one wants the books. The last
woman l called on said, Washington
wasn't her husbands ideal and she con-
sidered herself about as good a guide
for housekeepers as the woman who
writ books about housekeepin' while
somebody else did the cookin'.'
Here Mary laughed Historically and,
being worn out and nervous, ended by
having good cry.
"There, there; don't cry, dear"
begged old Mrs. Fairchild, soothingly,
"canvassing may not be your vocation,
but you are bound to succeed yet.
You're energetic and willing, and there
will come a turn in the tide, Mary, be-
fore very long, l know
Mary's tears had relieved the tension
on her nerves and her mothers faith in
her ultimate success encouraged her in
spite of the fears she entertained for
their future welfare, and she dried her
ey and began to smile.
"You' re regular sunbeam, mother
she said, kissing her atfectionatcIy,
"and | hope you re true prophet. as
well, and that the turn in the tide YOU
predict will soon occur"
And yet, despite her attempt at
cheerfulness, Mary was very sad when
she retired that night, little thinking
that her darkest hours had passed and
that bright future was about to dawn
for her
When Farmer Fairchild died he left
his wife and child in comfortable cir
cumstances, but little 10y little their
property had diminished until at last
Mary was forced to seek employment.
She first tried teaching country
school, but was obliged to give that up
on account OF long illness She then
tried book canvassing, but was not
fitted for the work and was not sue
cessful, yet, having her mother as well
as herself to support, she was deter
mined not to he conquered by adverse
circumstances. She slept little that
night, and woke early undetermined
what work she would attempt next.
This question was solved in an unex-
pected way, for letter, arrived from
a relative in a Western city, telling
Mary she had the refusal Of Il position
in large department store. The sal
airy. $50 month, would keep the two
until something better offered itself.
So the Fairchilds sold their little
home, went out TO the thriving West
ern town, where Mary at once began
work at the lace counter of Mr. Har-
ler's store.
Mr.. Harper, pleasant, middle-aged
man, was fine manager, keeping a
watchful eye on his employees, and he
soon noticed how anxious Mary was to
master all the details of her depart
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13
Vol. 1S

=: - s"ss:s:' r MAoRuDER CorFnAS WILSON,
FIRE =: INSURANCE =: BROKERS,
INSURANCE
W. ' ~ COMPANIES.
Office in the Bank Of Southern Maryland,
14h 1s99-1v MARLBORO
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13
THE SCHOOL AND THE
COMMUNITY,

There remain three sorts of knowl-
edge and training that the school
ought to promote to marked degree.
One of these has to do with conduct in
the ordinary social relations. The
principles of practical ethics, not mere
ly for the sake of intellectual percep-
ton, but for the sake of their incorpo-
ration into the very texture of charac-
ter, should be one of the foremost con-
Germs of school life. This fact has
come to be very widely recognized.
Less widely accepted in practice, al
though now quite generally admitted
in principle, is the duty Of the school
to play some part in fitting the child
for membership in the great producing
community. All schools cannot teach
the use even of the simplest tools, and
much less, therefore, can they turn
out skilled craftsmen. But all schools
can at lest be so conducted that they
do not positively unfit their scholars
for those very kinds of practical work
by which it is certain that the great
majority must obtain their livings
when their school days are done. A
successful country teacher will not of
necessity turn the district school into
an agricultural college; but it is true,
nevertheless, that the wise country
teacher will so train the boys and girls
of the district that everything they
learn will, in the most important sense,
fit them for being better farmers and
household economists.
Finally, it has come to be widely
admitted among teachers and the
friends of common school education
that, in this country especially, the
schools ought to have great deal to
do with the important task of rearing
young citizens. 1t no longer needs
any argument to secure acceptance for
view that boys and girls in the schools
ought not only to imbibe high ideals
respecting the institutions Of the coun-
try, but also that the spirit of potrio-
tism should be encouraged side by side
with the inculca.ion of great deal of
practical knowledge about the du-
ties and obligations of citizenship-A
Method of Pupil Self-Government," by
Albert Shaw, in the american Rev,ew
OF Reviews
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13
APRIL SHOWERS

Wash away the filth and waste that
have accumulated during the winter.
In like manner Hoods Sarsaparilla
expels from the blood Impurities that
have been deposited during the season
when there has been but little perspi-
ration and perhaps constant confine-
ment in impure and vitiated air. 1t is
a boon to tired mothers, housekeepers,
teachers and others who spend their
time indoors.
1t gives the blood richness and vi
tality, fitting it to nourish and
strengthen the nerves, muscles and all
the great organs of the body. 1t cures
all spring humors and banishes that
tired feeling.
1t is the best medicine money can
buy for all diseases caused by impure
or impoverished blood. You should
begin taking it to-day.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13
4luetrg.
MONEY MUSK.

In shirt of check and tallowed hair,
The fiddler sits in the bulrush chair
Like Moses basket stranded there,
On the brink of Father Nile.
He feels the tiddles slender neck,
Picks out the notes with thrum aud check,
And times the tune with nod and beck,
And thir ks its s. weary while.
All ready! Now he gives the call,
Cries, Honor to the ladie>!" All
The jolly tides Of laughter fall
And ebb in happy smile.
Down comes the bow on every string,
First couple join right hands and swing!'
As light as any bluetirds wing,
"Swing once more and half times round"
Whirls Mary Martin all in blue
Calico gown and stockings new,
And tinted eyes that tell you true.
Dance all to the dancing sound.
She fits about big Moses Brown,
Who holds her hands to keep her down,
And thinks her hair golden crown,
And his heart turns over once!
His cheek with Mary's breath is wet,
1t gives second somerset!
He means to win the maiden yet,
Alas for the awkward Ounce.
Your stoga boot has crushed my toe!'
"I'd rather dance with one legged joel"
"You clumsy fellow!" Y Y "Pass below"
And the first pair dance apart.
Then, Forward ski" advance retreat.
Like midges gay in sunbeam street,
'Tis Money Musk by merry feet
And the Money Musk by heart.
"Tree-quarters round your partners swing!
"Across the set!" The rafters ring,
The girls and boys have taken wing
And have brought their roses out!
IT'S Forward sikh" with rustic grace,
Ah, rarer far Thanksgiving to place"
Than golden clouds of old point lace
They bring the dance about.
Then clasping hands Albright and left!'
All swiftly weave the measure deft
Across the woof in loving weft
And the Money Musk is done!
Oh, dancers of the rustling husk.
Good night, sweethearts, tits growing dusk,
Good night for aye to Money Musk,
For the heavy march begun!
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13

The Younger One-Oh, he looks
just like Greek god!
The Elder One-The only Greek
gods ever saw were decidedly hard
looking characters
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13

He is 50 set against feeling people
that he persistcntly refuses to be
weighed"
"IIow's that
"Why, you know he'd have to tip
the scales"
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13
To Families and Grocers:-

If you have the slightest difficulty in
obtaining the Old Reliable Rumford Yeast or
Baking Powder, communicate with us by let
ter, postal or otherwise, and your wants
will be promptly supplied.
Do not be deceived by any attempt to
sell you an inferior alum baking powder in
place of the Old Reliable Rumford, matter
what reason is given. Low grade powders
pay better profit but unfit to use.
Run1ford is The Wholesome Powder,
and superior to all Others
RUMFORD, 2o5 Water Street.
Baltimore
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1900-04-13

The doting husband was discoursing
on the beauty of his wile's voice
"Shc has a note of pathos inner voice:
said he, THAT will draw tears from the
most hardened. | assure you | have
heard her sing before a large audience,
and when she has finished there has
not been dry eye in the room"
"Quite true" assented the cynic
"She always affects me that way.
Even if she only says she's going to
sing | weep bitterly"
does your wife do much fancy
work.
"Fancy work? She won't even let a
porous plaster come into the house
without crocheting red border round
it and running yellow ribbon through
the holes"