The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1900-09-28

Some other way.
- Willi;m J. hampton in Philadr!,hi North
American.
When "rhe Rogers Brothers in Central
Park" opened in Philadelphia Della Fox.
it is said received quite as much CT IN
ovatlon as the twin stars themselves.
Til" gags perpetratcd by the brothers,
however. seemed to quite stir up he r''i-
ct Pennsylvania city.
\ bunco steerer is supposed 10 have
sold Central park to the brothers. two
Sullihle Germans. The Rogers brothers;
feel some considerable responsibility over
their property, and post the follovn:
rules:
"Nurse girls must report all babies who
stop to talk to policemen. Don't throw
stones ut the pairs under the trees. Don t
talk in the presence Of the horses; they
carry tails. The wild animals will be
lot loose to play with the. children every
Saturday. Couples ma king love must
beware of the rubber plants.' And 50
on Indefinitely.
"-\n the banners on Broad street are
for Mckinley and Roosevelt" remarks
but banners don't votr,' replies the
aStut" Max.
ne: but they show which way the
wind bloWS.' responds the first.
Here is another bit of philosophy: II
don't need no FRIEND. says Max to his
brother; Il can spend my money OH my
SELF"
But if YOU don't have no friends. :"
says Gus. "who's going to tell YOU all
the bad things about yourSclf:''
And another: ''There's Il storm brew
ing, says Augustus.
II wish it was beer,' replies the thirsty
one.
"Oncc," says Gus Il was with a ship
wrecked crowd in an open boat at sea
After drifting about for ten hours we
saw a lighthouse. Oh, but we We're
glad; all but two men,
"Diln't they be glad of the light
house." asks the babelike Max.
no. replies little brother. "'rhey
were Nixon Il Zimmrrnan. and they
dent like light houseS.'
Inquiries Gus: "Whats Il corDoration?'
to pay him. yeS?' says Max.
"YcS.' says ingenious Gus.
"Wcll. YOU ain t 4 corporation.
"Cus,' says the other one your sis
ter Maggie is crazy about kis>inS''
'I1oW do YOU knOW?'
Il got it from her own lips"
;lIl alIilu. S'tNl me poet 10 inc
editor, ''rhat YOU don't exactly grasp the
depth of the ideas expressed in my blank
verse;
'pcrhapS not" said the editor. "They
may be beyond my mental rrach.'
Il think You wrong yourS>lf.' said tn,
poet kindly. LET me test the point
Here is Il line at random: She swiftly
passed him dGWn the silent way. and i'll
her path 4 subtle perfume fingered
There: that doesn't seem confused to you.
''Eot at ALL replied the editor brisk.
ly, ''that'S easy. You are simply trying
to say that Il g;,S' line automobile went
down the pix, !'--Clevcllnd Plain Deal
'Goin' the whole way, mistcr?" in
Qnircd the passenger with the greer
necktic. as he took out his Snuffbox. pre-
paratory to settling himself for q cross
examination.
The party interrogatcd eyed him attcn
tlvely, then replied:
NO: l get out ut the third station.
am going to collect some money due t
me for groceries supplied. You see. an
Il wholesale grocer. The business wa,
left me- by my father. | am married an,
have five children. The eldest is II year:
old. l am exactly twelve years and nine
months married. | live in a semi-dt.
tachcd house. rented ut f1G. My wife i;
fair, and weighs twelve stone. She wa:
il dairymaid before | married her. ant
has been vaccinated twice. My bank
book is worth $500. was educated Il
a public school,
The man in the green npcEtic had
dissatisfied look as he inquired:
"What did your great grandfather ds
for a living? Answers.
Hilton-"Wc hear Il great deaf ahou
the corrupt French stage; but shout,
think it ought to be especially pure
Tolman-"-And what brings You to tina
thinking?'
Hilton-"Thrrc have been SO man,
vile plays taken from the French that !;
does not seem possible the French cal
have many naughty plays left. "-Bosto>
Transcript.
In an examination Of divinity student!
for ordination. III England. one candidat,
was so poorly equipped for his mcnta
struggle tina: the bishop ordained him on
ly on his promise to study "Butler'
Analogy'' after ordination.
The SUDDEN: was the guest of the hish
op; so the next morning, when he depart
ed, the reverend gentleman shook hi
hand cordially and said. as he did SO
'Goodby. Mr.. Greedy; don't forget tn
'Rutler.''
Il haven't. my lord" was the s,,rpris
ing answer. Il just gave him five shil
linyS. '-Exchange
Harrict-"When l said, 'Speakin.
about husbands,' what made YOU sto}
me-" Carrie-"Because I was afrai(
you would offend Mrs. Menniwed. Sh,
has lost no less than three husbands. an(
she is very sensitive on the sub ject
therefore. She is afraid that people vii
think they were lost through her care
lessness.' Boston Transcript.
A Florida editor bewails his Loneliness
in this pathetic paragraph:
1.-THE sunshine that used ter fill tn,
door an brighten the house amt brigh
any more; it looks gloomy, too. I woul<
like ter hear the voice uf LizaDeth nov
a-sayin', Bill, cit move on you, an