Missouri Valley times. [volume] (Missouri Valley, Iowa) 1874-1931, 1900-08-16

''BY J1NGO. GUT THAT'S A STRONG P1NT!"
a day. 1t is education that makes
nation. The less education the more
vice and wickedness."
THAT'S jest the way l look at it,,
says the squar. II say education be-
fore everything else, but we've got
men in this town who differ with me.
You wouldn't think that leadin men of
town would be agin schoolhouses.
would youY'
'"rhey must be queer sort of men.
Don't they want their children to know
who discovered AmericaY
THAT'S mighty strong pint, mighty
strong" says Deacon Spooncr, as he
tunks his cane on the floor and looks at
Abner Jones.
II reckon you're hittin at me-" re-
plies Abner after whittlin away for a
moment, "and I've got few words
to say. I'd like to ask this stranger
here IL lie knows who discovered
America"
"Why, certainly, SIR" said the man.
HAS 1t ever done you any good? Has
1t ever made any difference to you
whether it was Smith, Green or
BROWNE"
"But 1t is knowledge"
"Yes, It's knowledge, and that's a
strong pint" whispers the deacon.
'Yes, it's schoolhouse Knowledge
says Abncr, "but let NE ask YOU sun
thin. What month in the year d'you
plant pumpkin seeds?"
Pumpkin seeds! Why, what hav.
pumpkin seeds got to do with educa
tionY"
"Quitc little bit, reckon. This
county ships huff pumpkins every
year to make 100000 10 cent pies.
don't believe ten farmers kin tell you
when America was discovered, but
they know when to plant pumpkins.
Which is the best fur 'cm? l reckon
You kin tell what year George WASH
ingtOn died In, which can't, but d'you
know whar to fastcn rope when you
want to drive a hog to marketY
by lingo. but that's Il strong pint,
and Abner's got him" shouts the dca-
con MS he jumps up and down.
The stranger appeared to be sort Of
confused and taken down, but tried to
git out Of it by sayin they were
triflin with the subject.
'I'ln one as isn't opposed to schools
and, education" says Moses Plumber,
'but l don't want too many Of 'em.
I'm sayin that everybody orter know
how to read. write and cipher, but
nowadays they want to stuff children
with heap that's no good to any
body"
"But what man kin know too much 2"
asks the stranger. "But fur higher
knowledge how would we know that
the earth revolved on its axis?"
"But s'pose we didn't know? S'pose
we fggered that the earth stood still?
Wouldn't we have licked the British
at Yorktown jest the same, and
wouldn't the price Of wheat be the
same us today? was tallin with
young Jim Benson t'other day. He
could tell the distance to the sun with
In mile. but he couldn't tell how
many rails to n rod of fence. He could
give the names of all the stars, but he
didn't know that cuttin hogs tail of
would make him root the harder, prob
ably hopin to find new one. He could
tell when every state come into the
Union, but he didn't know that COW
kicked sideways instead Of straight
behind"
"By lingo, Moses, but that's oratory
and u strong pint bcsides!" exclaims
the deacon. "In the face Of them facts
I can't see how we are to git another
schoolhouse."
''You have been Ill ut some time or
other in your life?' queries the stran-
ger Of Moses.
Il hev. Three years ago was down
with fever and everybody thought I'd
die"
but you were saved. and how2 II
the doctor who was called in had sim.