davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
BRIGHT BITS.

His State of Mnd.-'Your bookkeeper
is subject to fits of i'll humor, isn't he?"
NO; but he has widely isolated attacks
of amiability.''-C Record.
After the Tiff you do call to-mor-
row I shall tell Mary to say that I'm not
in
"All right-then I shall tell Mary to
say that l didn't call!'-Tit- Bits.
bridget" said the mistress to her sick
servant, would you take little medi-
cine?"
Faith, ma'am." said she, ''Td take any
thing to make me well, aven if 1 knew
twould kill me.'-Philadelphia Record.
-Technique.-"W What's the difference be-
tween a trust and consolidation"
"Well, a trust puts up prices without
saying anything; but consolidation waits
until after 1t has announced that prices
will not be put p."-Indianapolis Jour
nal.
"A Real Sinecure.-Tired Tompkins-
There's one job wouldn't mind havin',
Horace.
Hungry Horace lin amazemenD-What's
that?
'Lineman fer err wireless telegraph
comp ny. Life.
Information Wanted.-The lecturer on
the Ethics of Expansion" had delivered
a thoughtful and scholarly discourse, and
before leaving the rostrum he said: IF
there is any point l have failed to make
clear l shall be happy to repair the omis-
sion, so far as 1 am able. Has any one
question TO ask?"
A worried-ooking young man rose up.
There is one thing ! would like to know"
he said, "and l can't find anybody who
fal \, 81,
away from home, and they bring on chick
en- salad, is ii proper to eat the leaf of
lettuce that comes with it?"-Chcago
Tribune.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
PLATT'S PENSION BILL.

A couple of years ago there was such
an outcry against the tendency TO give a
pension to everybody that was either dl.
rectly or remotely connected with the
Union army in the War of Secession that
there was a movement to make the pen
sion roll a roll of honor-that Is, to con-
fine pensions 10 those deserving them
Now however the disposition seems to
be to go to the other extreme, and to give
pensions 10 those who do not deserve them.
This latter class is included in bill
which has been introduced in Congress by
Representative Hall of Pennsylvania who
wants all of the teamsters who were en-
ployed in the Union armies to have PEN
sions If his bill were TO become a law il
would take about IS 900 600 year out of
the treasury.
And ii does not appear that there Is any
good reason why the teamsters should
have pensions. They were paid for the
services they rendered and they were
never in the service of the governments
There must be a great many of these old
army teamsters in Mr.. Halls district who
are voters
The most remarkable pension bill. how
ever, that has been introduced INTO this
Congress is that of Senator Plat of New
York The applicant in this bill is a
man 80 years of age who says that he had
a son who enlisted in the Union Army in
1861. and died of heart disease before he
was mustered into service. There IS no
law under which this old man can get a
pension, and hence Senator Plat has I'M
dertaken to get the government to take
care of him. No doubt he is a charge on
the community in which he lives, ana the
people DO not want to be burdened with
him. hence the effort to unload him on the
government.
If this pension business goes on as 1t is
now going, It will not be many years be-
fore a large percentage Of the population
of the country will be on the pension roll
The pension burden will be so great that
the people will find IL heavier than they
can carry. The vast armies Of the ma
tons Of Europe are not more burdensome
to their respective peoples than our army
Of pensioners is becoming to us. And
the politicians are to blame for this condi-
ton of affairs.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
INDEX TO NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.

Meetings-Annual Meeting Stockholders
Southwestern Railroad Company; Calanthe
Lodge No. 2S. X. of P; German Friendly
Society; Oglethorpe Light Infantry.
Special Notices-Mantels Thing and
Crates, Savannah Building Supply Com
pany; Paints. Oils, Varnishes. Etc, An-
drew Hanley Company.
Business Notiees-Red and White Malt
vinegars. Henry Solomon & Son; E. & w.
Laundry.
Circular Saws-Palmer Hardware Com
pany.
Legal Notices-Application to Sell Lots
Belonging 10 Estate Julia M. Best, Deceas-
ed; Application to Sell Property of Ste
phen johnson, Deceased.
Steamship Schedule-Merchants and
Miners Transportation Company.
Medical-Dr. Hathaway Company.
Cheap Column Advertisements-Help
Wanted; Employment Wanted; For Rent;
For Sale; Lost; Personal; Miscellaneous.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
OvercOat Signs.

THANK you" said Senator Beveridge of
Indiana to an attache at the White House
who offered to assist him in putting on
his overcoat, says the Washington Post.
"a young man never refuses TO accept help
In getting his overcoat on, but the older
a man gets the more certain he is to re-
fuse help and say, No, thank you, 1 can
get 1t on oil right 1t is a certain indica-
ton of old age when n man will not per
NIT another to aid in getting on his over
coat"
Senator Elkins overheard the remark OF
the young Senator from Indiana and said;
well, If what you say is true Senator
Hawley is one of the youngest men in the
Senate. He always accepts assistance in
putting on his overcoat. But one day he
said to me, 'Elkins when you hear me say
that can get my overcoat on without any
one helping me you may be sure that
am getting Old "
Next Jerry Smith soliloquized to him
self. Jerry has been at every dinner and
public and private reception at the White
House for years, and his principal bust
ness during that time was to artistically
aid in putting on overcoats and inciden-
tally 10 receive in a Chesterfieldian man
ner whatever tips were given him. "I 1es
tells yer" said Jerry to himself "dere's
lots of troof in what de Senator said but
l jes knows dat nobody can put on an
obercoat like dis here niger"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
THE noER PoMER OF. REsIsTENCE.


II is estimated that the Transvaal and
the Orange Free State can put in the field
about 5000 first-class fighting men il
is probable that the Boer armies are being
Increased by the addition Of several thous-
and sympathizers from other parts Of
South Africa. To these must b. added
the soldiers of fortune, who are going to
the Transvaal from all parts of the world.
How great their number will be 1t is i'm
possible to say with any degree of Ger
tainty Many of the Outlanders also have
taken up arms in the cause of the Beers.
II is safe to say that the British will have
to contend against al least 5000 men
There is no longer any doubt that the
Beers have arms and ammunition sufii-
cient to last them for several years. DR..
Leyds, their agent in Europe, says that
they have been spending at least a million
dollars a year ever since the Jameson
raid in preparing for The war, which they
felt sure was coming The Jameson raid
occurred just four years ago. 1t is evil
dent therefore that the Beers have very
good supply of about everything they need
for their army.
It is now understood why the British
were in ignorance of the extent of the
preparations of the Beers for war. In
stead of the guns and ammunition which
they purchased in Germany and France
being sent to the Boer capital over the
British railway from the Cape, they We're
shipped to Lourenzo Marquee, on Delagoa
bay and thence over the railway to Pre-
toria Delagoa bay has been. and still is
Of the greatest Importance to the Beers
If the British could get control of it the
Beers would be deprived of a factor in
the situation that is of the greatest i'm
portance to them. 1t is doubtful, however,
if the British will succeed in getting con-
troll of it. Both Germany and France
have interests in the Transvaal, from
which they would hardly consent TO be
shut out. In the Transvaal there are at
least twenty German colonies, and each
of them is of very considerable impor-
lance.
The opinion is gaining ground that the
British will not make much Roadway
against the Beers until they adopt the
Boer tactics in fighting-the guerilla tao
tics. If they had a couple of regiments
of the sort of men that composed the
rough rider element of our army in the
Spanish-American war, they would have
just what they need. The British don't
lack courage, but they know nothing about
the kind of fighting that is necessary to
be done to conquer the Beers.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
PER SONAL.

Josiah Quincy the retiring Mayor of
Boston. has been almost continuously in
public office for the past ten years.
The London papers print reports to the
effect that the health of Florence Night
ingale is so enfeebled that she will prob
ably not live until the 1st of January.
Capt Foot, the head of the San Fran
cisco branch of the Salvation Army, has
gone TO the City of Mexico to endeavor to
obtain permission for the organization
which he represents to establish a branch
in Mexico. 1t is not probable that he will
succeed in his mission, for the laws of the
country forbid all professions of a relig
ious character upon the streets of Mexi-
can cities. One year ago the Salvation
Army made a similar effort to gain ad
mission to the City of Mexico, but failed.
An English paper tells this story Of
the late Joseph Whitaker, the publisher Of
Whitaker's Almanack: For the first issue
he wanted, along with similar informa-
ton, the amount of the salaries received
by number of certain high functionaries
in the civil service. Application to these
personages themselves was uniformly met
with only fiat refusals Accordingly the
'Almanack' appeared with list of the
officials, each credited with a purely imag-
mary sum. The result was instantaneous.
Hardly had the first edition came out be-
fore those whose salaries had been under
rated were impelled by amour propre to
write indignant corrections, while the po-
lite statements of the inland revenue au-
thorities were similarly efficacious where
the alleged amount was at all in excess
of the actual income"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
Battle of RiVaI Lavyers

The law court is the modern substitute
for the tournament, and pretty good sub
sttute it proves when a battle is on be-
tween rival lawyers, quick-wt and out
spoken. says the Youths Companion
The late Col. John Atkinson was op-
posed in an important case by another
able lawyer, James II. Pound and they
were fighting like giants for every point
of advantage. Pound had won a majority
of the jOusts; the Colonel was nettled. and
was lying low for a chance to deliver
swinging blow.
1T came" says the Judge, when I de-
cided a point against Pound. 1t had been
tiercely argued by both attorneys, and in
deciding il as l did, ! stated my reasons
at length, giving authorities. 1 saw Pound
shake his head at one of my conclusions;
his lips moved, and I supposed he had
made some comment. so when concluded
my decision. l asked:
What did you say Mr.. Pound?'
quick as a shot and in his most cut
ting tones of intense sarcasm, the Colonel
replied:
Mr.. Pound did not speak, you honor.
He merely shook his head There is moth
ing In It, "
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
Great Men Deformed.

Some. twelve years ago Lombroso said
that the greater men of the world usually
are marked by some sort of deformity.
and the truth of this statement grows up
on us the more we know of the race. saws
the New York Press. Consider, If YOU
please, the abnormally little fellows with
brains-Alexander, Plato Epicurus. Do
genes, Abe Hummel. Jay Could the alb
normally lean. like Cicero, Voltaire. Wei
lngton. Napoleon Din his YOUTH, william
NJ. Evarts, Senator Fairbanks, Judge
Bleckley. Abe Lincoln; the rickerty. or
otherwise physically deformed. like Aesop.
Tyrteus, Pope, Scarron, TaIeyrand BY
ron, Marshall =. Wilder Prince Profotti
Richard III. Count Borowlaski, John
d Estrix; those who suffered, like Virgil
Demosthenes, Henry Guy Carleton: the
abnormally fat, like David Davis. Grover
Cleveland, Dixon II. Lewis, John A. p
Fisk; the morally diseased, like Dumas,
Darwin, Rapallo, Ben Hill Shakespeare.
Charles Coghlan, Henry VIII. The list
might be made much longer.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

The MORNING NEWS IS published
every day in the year, and is served to
subscribers in the city. or sent by mall
at zoe a month. S4.oO for six months, and
$500 for one year.
The MORNING NEWS. by mail, six
times a week without Sunday issue),
three months, $3.50. SIX months, 500. one
year 500.
The WEEKLY NEWS, issues a week
Monday and Thursday. by mail. one year
800.
Subscriptions payable In advance. Re
init by postal orders. check or registered
letter. Currency sent by mail at risk OF
eenders
Transient advertisements. other than
special column. local or reading notices.
amusements and cheap or want column
10 cents line. Fourteen lines OF agate
type-equal to one inch square In depth
ie the standard of measurement Contract
rates and discounts made known on apph-
cation at business office.
Orders for delivery of the MORNING
NEWS to either residence or place OF
business may be made by postal card or
through telephone No. 30 Any irregular
ity in delivery should be Immediately re-
ported to the Office of publication.
Letters and kilograms should be ad-
dressed MORNING NEWS" Savannah.
Ga
EASTERN OFFICE, % Park Row. New
York city. H. C. Faulkner, Manager.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
CURRENT COMMENT.

The Chicago Chronicle Dem). discuss
ing the war in South Africa says: The
trouble is that the British war office is
like the house of Bourbon. 1t neither
learns nor fOrgets. The contempt which
Braddock felt for Washington is still felt
by the average British officer for the ir-
regular organization. But the command
ers in South Africa have been taught a
lesson as Braddock was taught his, and IL
they profit by il the despised colonials
may yet save the day in Africa as they
fury and a half ago. Otherwise nothing
but disaster awaits the British arms"
The Philadelphia Ledger Qnd) saws:
"AH the Powers concerned have now
agreed to maintain the open door policy
in China China, herself, can offer no
objection, even if disposed TO do so, and a $
each of the Powers is interested in pre-
venting the other from closing any port
the policy may be considered as estab sh-
ed. Hereafter trade with China, at least
in the treaty ports, is free 10 the world"
The New Orleans Times-Democrat
(Dem) says: There is far too much
vagueness and cowardice on the part of
those-particularly among the Republicans
who are opposed to the trusts What IS
wanted is plain. straightforward language
which everybody can unders tand. and sim
pie propositions for the suppression of the
trusts which can be easily 'comprehended
of the vulgar "
The Louisville Courier-Jounal Dem)
says: THE Frenchmen who are chatter
ing and gesticulating most violently
against England's war on the so-called
republics" Of South Africa are the idenli-
cal Frenchmen who are doing all they
can 40 overturn the French republic"
The Washington Post Qnd) says: IF
Gen. Otis has really captured Mrs AguI-
naldo, we trust he will be magnanimous
enough to restore her life and her cloth
ing II viii be recalled that these conVe-
niences were taken by Otis on a form r
occasion"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

Those Charleston '1ynchers" who gave
demonstration Of their gentle art for the
edihcation of the Gridiron Club the other
day may feel constrained to put w. E.
Curtis of the Chicago Record on their list
for attention al some future day. Writ
ing 10 his paper. Curtis says: Charleston
is probably the least progressive and the
most antiquated place of its size in the
United States. 1t is the last place
that any sane man would think of select
ing for a frolic. The dilapidated
ola depot would disgrace a village Of
200 inhabitants" OF the ! News and
Courier's portraiture of the members OF
the club. MIR. Curtis says the pictures were
a collection of old and discarded por-
traits taken from the top shelves Of its
stereotype room, representing murderers
thieves, convicts, patent medicine samp-
lers. members of the State Legislature and
other disreputable characters" The pic
lures. as matter Of fact. were Of South
Carolina governors, senators, congressman
and legislators.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

An exceptional operation in brain SIR
gerry was performed in Chicago a few days
ago. With the aid Of x-rays tumor was
located in the brain of boy The child
had been made both bind and deaf by the
ailment and symptoms of paralysis had
set in. The X-ray print showed that the
tumor rested on the auditory and optic
nerve. An operation was performed. and
pus-sac as large as an egg removed
from the brain. The child stood the op-
Grafton wen, recovered both sight and
hearing, and will shortly be discharged
as cured.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
country.

1t seems that the naval clique at Wash
ington will not be satisfied to have the
Sampson-Schley controversy settled upon
any plan that will do justice to Admiral
Schley. 1t is now said that the President
is being urged TO recommend the creation
of only one vice admiralship, and TO APP
point Sampson to the place However it
is in the power of Congress to create two
places, and to let the President understand
so plainly 4 is the desire Of that body that
schley shah have one of them that he
would not fail TO nominate him to it,
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

Hon. Thomas Eason, who is now serv-
ing an unexpired term as a prison COM
missioner. Is a candidate for the full term.
He has flied a number Of public Offices
with ability and fidelity. and it is to be
hoped that he viii be continued as a mem
Der of the commission.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

The Lawton fund now closely approx
mates $4,000, and it is practically sure
that that sum will be reached if not passed
before the lists are closed The ease and
has been accomplished make it clear with
what esteem this hero of Luzon-the only
general officer 10 fall in battle since the
beginning of the war with Spain and the
Filipinos-was held by the people of his
country
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

A report comes from England to the eff
feet that the government will send Presi-
dent Kruger to the Island of St. Helena
(Napoleons island, and that even now
Longwood is being prepared for his re-
ception. 1t would enhance the reputation
Of the doughty and coarse old Boer TO be
imprisoned on the rocks where stalks the
shade Of the mighty Corsican; still the
Beers haven't been conquered yet, and
Kruger is first to be caught before he can
be imprisoned anywhere.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

There seems now to be little probability
that there will be an International yacht
race for the Americas cup this year The
understanding is that Sir Thomas Upton
will challenge for next year. Whether
Watson or Fife will design his vessel is a
mooted question.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

A Philadei phia contemporary desires to
know whether or not the construction of
the Chicago canal makes this section of
the country an island The canal con-
meets Lake Michigan with the Mississippi
river, while on the north the waters of the
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

DIR. Schenck, the Austrian scientist
whose remarkable theory of prenatal In
fiuences not long ago created such a stir,
has been retired from the faculty of the
University of Vienna. II is said that his
retirement was demanded by the medical
fraternity. who held that the professor
had been guilty of unethical conduct in
advertising himself and making a "frivo-
lous publication of scientific matter"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

A great electrical power plant is being
constructed at Niagara Falls, on the Ca
madam side of the river 1t is proposed
to transmit the energy across the river
to the American side by wire. Now, the
question arises. should the electricity be
faCture?
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
Passenger Fares from Savannah.

TO NEW YORh-Cabin, $40; excursion.
$S2. intermediate, SIS; excursion, $24.
Steerage, SO.
TO BOsTON-Cabin, $22; excursion, $3s.
intermediate. $17, excursion. SIS. Steer
age, $11.75.
The express steamships of this line are
appointed to sail from Savannah, Central
(90th) meridian time, follows:
SAVANNAH TO NEW YORK.
LA GRANDE DUCHEssE, Capt. Hanlon.
MONDAY, Jan. s. 1890 D. m.
CITY OF AUGUSTA, Capt Daggett,
TUESDAY, Jan. 9. HOO p m.
CITY OF MACON. Capt Savage.
THURSDAY, Jan. II, 1870 p. m.
TALLAHASSEE, Capt. Askins. SATUR-
DAY, jan 10. 3:SO p m.
KANSAS CITY. Capt. Fisher. MONDAY.
Jan. Is, 500 D. m.
LA GRANDE DUCHEssE. Capt Hanlon.
TUESDAY, Jan. 16, $50 p. m.
CITY OF AUGUSTA, Capt. Daggett.
THURSDAY. Jan. IS, $50 p m.
URDAY. Jan. 20, 500 p. m.
TALLAHASSEE. Capt. Askins. MON
DAY, Jan. 90. 900 p. m.
KANSAS CITY, Capt. Fisher, TUES
DAY Jan. %, 1000 p. m.
LA GRANDE DUCHEssE, Capt. Hanlon.
THURSDAY, Jan. %, 1880 a. m
CITY OF AUGUSTA Capt. Daggett.
SATURDAY, Jan. q. 1870 p. m.
DAY, jan 49, $3.50 p. m.
TALLAHASSEE Capt Askins, TUES.
DAY, Jan. 80, 4:SO p. m.
SAVANNAH TO BOSTON.
Steamers CITY OF BIRMINGHAM,
GATE CITY and CHATTAHOOCHEE
sailing on irregular schedules.
Steamers leave New York for Savannah
at p m. daily, except Sunday, Monday
and Thursday. The sailings between Bos-
ION and Savannah win be irregular. Call
On w. G.. BREWER Ticket Agent, 107
bull street, Savannah, Ga, for informa-
lion as to the time of sailing for Boston
direct
w. G. BREWER. City Ticket and Pass
enger Agent. 1O7 Bull street. Savannah.
Ga.
f. w. SMITH, Contracting Freight
Agent, Savannah, Ga.
r. G. IRRELEVANT, Agent, Savannah,
Ga.
f. H. HINTON, Traffic Manager.
JOHN NJ. EGAN. Vice President.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

Persons who have to write the number
OF the year in Roman numerals viii thank
their stars that the best opinion has de
cided that it is to be written MON.
MDCCCC would be both tiresome and
cumbersome.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08
The Weather.

The indications for to-day are generally
fair weather in Georgia, and partly cloudy
In Eastern Florida.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1900-01-08

Representative Gaines OF Tennessee pro-
poses IN bill which he has introduced
into the House. to use the postoffice as
means for reaching the trusts. He would
exclude from the use of the mails all par
ties who seek ito abolish. abridge or in
anywise affect open and free competition
in trade, or exclude rivalry between par
ties thereto, or themselves and others en-
gagged IN like or other business to create
or promote any restrictions in trade or
to commerce, or to limit the production
of any article or commodity of trade or
commerce, or to fix the wages of employees,
In short, the proposition is that the gov
ernent shall not transmit the mail matter
OF any trust. This would place extraor-
binary and dangerous power in the hands
Of the postoffice department.