The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1900-09-28
KANSAS CLIPS AND COMMENTS.

man.
A Missourian who was stopping at
Imam began his trip up the golden
stairs by falling down the stairs atthe
city hotel
Enough of the new tangled patent
corn cutters are in use to supply the
papers with frequent tales of limbs cut
by the knife.
The Fontana correspondent of the
Paola Republican in list of the re-
sources and industries of the town in
cludes lone cemetery"
Prohibition in Kansas does1't pre-
vent the granaries, the banks and the
schools from being full this year.
Complaints are general all over the
State.
While Bryan was touring south
eastern Kansas the managers tackled
on the handbills the significant
sentence, "Bryan's speech will be
free.
The street fair after one short sea-
son in this State is denounced as tend
ing to immortality which shows how
quickly Kansas people turn things in
side out.
The Fort Scott Monitor figures that
S75, 900 was left in town by reason of
the log rolling. Judging by the num-
erous reports of pocket picking much
of this generosity was involuntary.
1t has just occurred to Mcpherson
that even if there is natural gas under
the town nobody knows it. AS soon
as public curiosity has been allowed
to work'itself up well will be sunk.
A Kentucky distillery has APP
preached the political managers of all
parties at Topeka to supply them with
| TASKS of whiskey at 800 hasks for 800,
to be used as tokens by candidates
during the campaign.
A Salina man hit another man with
potato and broke a rib. In spite of
the medical fraternity Salina men are
now confident that this is the weak rib
| selected in Adams collection from
which weak Eve was fashioned.
The Tribune says that the Chanute
reporter who wrote of young lady,
cher feet are like fairy boots" packed
| his wardrobe in handkerchief and
| left for parts unknown when he saw
2
feet are like ferry boats"
+. c. Soraper, of Topeka, just be-
/ fore his train reached Seneca, took
/ his dull knife and tattooed his breast
with 20 stabs and drew the edge across
his throat. He had vainly attempted
suicide and was adjudged insane.
1t speaks we'll for the level headed
! nf tho Niahftu nn1ipn that xuhnr
they received q message from the
sheriff at Council Grove, Watch for
boy riding gray mare, PAGES under
saddle, with black pants" they did
not spend one minute looking for a
mare with black pants.
Atchison Champion: The train
stopped and passenger raised the
curtain in the sleeper and read; Jones
& Co., druggists: Smith & Brothers,
druggists; Brown Il Evans. druggists.
Il see" said the passenger, as he
dropped the curtain, that we are in
Topeka"
"Well, ma, - writes a Kanses boy
home to his mother, ~ was just jok-
ing when ! wrote to youthat | was go
ing to marry one of these beautiful
damses of the Philippines group"
and the old lady as she read it, heaved
"A sigh of relief that shook dirt down
the we'll.
In the broad eXpanse of desolate
woe presented by the Paola Times APP
pears the ad of "a leading merchant
who declares prosperity is upon US,
whether Providence or Mark Hanna
is the cause makes no difference, the
dollars of the foreigners are rolling
towards Uncle sam. Bet that
merchant had to pay dollar u word
for that ad,
A Coffeyville Democrat, full of inn
perialism. said to Republican friend,
"Don't you know Mckinley wants to
be king? Roosevelt wants to be king:
You named a pair of kings at Phila-
delpnia." Maybe we did, " respond
ed the weary Republican, "but any
idiot knows that Il pair of kings will
beat pair of jacks"
Robert Avery who has served II
months of three year sentence to the
pententiary at Leavenworth for theft
will get ont. Avery claimed that the
stolen goods found on him he bought
from a horse trader. The other day
that horse trader appeared in the pen,
Avery recognized him and the man
confessed to the old crime.
An Arkansas City boy writing home
about his experience in the storm at
Galveston, where he was working.
says; Getting along all O. r., eX.
cept this morning they gave me a rot.
ten fried egg, which fixed me from
getting hungry this day. All we get
is ham and eggs and coffee, but We
Fare lucky to get that. No kick com,
ing at all, Guy Harris sleeps with
me now. He dreams all night of the
flood and yells out to get "A boat, anG
things like that. Then | Lit him Will
chair and he wakes up enough tc
say, Guess | was dreaming, wasn'tI?
He was sure. One man went crazy
last night from thinking of the awful
scenes of Saturday night, jumped GU
of the third story window and ran fol
the bay, He hasn't been seen since