Decorah public opinion. (Decorah, Winneshiek County [Iowa]) 1895-1928, 1900-12-19
ABE MAKES A GOOD COOK
AND DOES THINGS UP BROWN
Helps to Entertain Relatives from the
City, and Relates His Experiences.

Pa want feelin very well and wanted
/ should rite in his phase this weak. 1
was thunderstruck as Par is hiiy edi-
Gated and seen lots of the world, while /
amt graduated yet; but mar said I was
smarter than par ever was, and to go
ahead, and asked par what should
write about. He sed all papers like
items, give an ackOunt of our visitors
from Chikango and your hooking.
Well, we had a visit from some Of
over hi-toned relashuns a while ago
from Chikago. They never kom only
when they want fresh are and good
vittles. They allus give US kordial
invitashun to kun and sea them, but
no very wei we wont, as the expense
of travelling and the kostumes sewt-
able for thare klas would be to expen-
sive, and besid all we Good do in the
presence of thare grand kompany wood
be to set and fold over hands, twirl
eur thums and look silly. None but
the ladies and children kom, the hus-
bands are in BUSINESS and never stop
for fresh are or anything to eat so long
as there is dollar in site. They ar
rived unexpectedly and mar said that
as had good deal of experience in
maxim fires in the monring and putin
on the tea ketel, should get break
fast. So put on the potatos, the meet
and coffy, and had large pan of bat
ter for buckwheat kakes in a chare
all redy to strike when the iron was
hot. Just as things was all agoin in
good shape a neighbor kane and kalled
par out, they sune got to talking poll
tiks, and / run out to heer, and stade
to long. When I went in the meet
had burnt to kole, the pertaters had
billed dri, and the koffy was as black
as republican EDITORS hart Il meen
his hat. doused som kold water in
the pertaters and sent them further on
thare way to destrukshun. In the
meen time thought wood take a
smoke, and forgittin al about the pan
of batter in the chare, / sot down to
light my pipe and sot right in the pan.
When kom to bake the pan kakes /
had forgotten to put in any Sally
Ratus, and noticed they never riz but
once, and that was when SUDDENLY sot
down on 'em. L never cleaned them
battered pants, but generously do
mated them to the heethen thinking
they wood do to etc or to ware. AT
nine o'clock kolled the gests to brek-
fest and in hours they he'd maid
thare toil-ettes and kun down. Tha
all exclaimed in korus how awfuly
erly country people hev breakfast. l
am still undesided whether tha exselled
most in porliteness or as liars. Tha
prased everything; such bewtiful ham,
and got into diskushun about the
kolor, one said it was steal gray, an
other it was seel brown, and one mid
die aged lady who wore her spektakles
on top of her head sed it was astrikan
black, and thing she was rite. And
such lovely koffy, they he'd smelt the
aromy all over the house several hours
before tina got up. And such magnifi-
sent pertater soop, and such fine
pankakes, so rich and dewrable (that's
what the blacksmith sed that bot
what was left to max lether apern Of J
Where did you buy such fine groserys?
I sed par done his tradin WHARF he
Good get trusted and he is so wei
known hear that he mite of got em in
sum other town.
They he'd ofsprings with em, from
s to II years old, and 1 never see such
kritters, and mar sed she never did an
herd her tell par sheed be glad when
they was gone. Tha brok down all
the gates swingin on em, skart the
kats so tha went to the nabors to bord,
chased the hens so tina hadn't time to
lay an rode the fat hogs so much tina
lost 10 pounds day. One day tina
tried to harnes one of EN- to the whel-
barrow but the hog proved stubborn.
Then tina had way of fixin a pin in
a chare so it woodnt be notised until
you kom in contakt with it. Par sot
down on it wonse and never see fel-
Ter in a sirkuss jump as hi as he did;
it was so komikal that everybody
laffed but par, he didn't 81 enything,
but looked as tho he was redy to fite
Jeffries without eny training.
Well, tina hev gone; an the mex time
we hev grand companee" children
will be bard-mar will do the kookin
and will entertain the gests by playin
on the pianny.
ABE JONES, Jr.