The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1900-02-04

"Well sir" said Mr.. Dooley. 81 see
that tn gloryous OF commonwealth ~
kentucky is itsilf again.
"How's that?" asked Mr.. Hennessy.
FIT some time past said Mr.. Doolcy.
"they's been nathin' doin' thatd make a
meetin' iv tn Epworth Lague inthrostin'
TIL bystanders in Kentucky has been as
safe as journeyman h.ghwayman in Chi
cago. Perfectly innocent an unarmed men
whit into tn State an come out again
without bullet hole in their backs. 1t
looked FIR 4 while as If tn life iv tn
ordn'ry visitor was goin' TO be harmless
i'm Kentucky as in Utah, tn home iv tn
desthroyers Nv American domestic life.
dinnaw why 1t was. whether IL was tn in
fluence iv our new citizens in Cuba an tn
Philippians or what it was. but anyhow
tn on'y news that came out iv Kentucky
was peaceful, Hinnissy, as tn rayports
iv bloody battle in South Africa. But
Kentucky, as Hogan says, was not dead
but on'y sleepin'. TIL other day that gram
OF State woke up through two Nv its fore
most rapid-firin' citizens.
''They met be chanst in a hotel con-
tagious to a bar Colonel Derringer was
mer Nv his forty-four Colt gun PRESENTED to
him be his constituents on tn occasion iv
his min rabe speech on tn NECESSITY iv
spreadin' tn civilization iv tn United
States to tn ends iv tn wur-ruld. Sur
roundup him was Major Bullseye. a we'll
known lawyer, cattle raiser an journalist
Nv Athens, Bulger county, whose destruction
Nv Capt: Cassius Glaucus Virgins at tn
meetin iv tn thrustees in tn Sicond Bap-
fist Church excited so much comment.
among sportin men three or four years
ago, Gin'ral Rangefinder, iv Thebes, Col.
Chivvy, iv Sparta, who whitfield Major Ly-
curgus Gam, Nv Thermopylae. down to tn
wish bone at tn anti-polygamist meetin'
las June, an other well-known gintlemen.
eth party was suddenly confronted be
Major Lyddite, iv Carthage, an a party
Nv frinds, who were in town for tn pur-
pose iv pretectin' tn suffrage again amy
pollution but their own. Col. Derringer
an Major Lyddite had been inimies FIR
siveral months, liver since Major Lyddite,
in attimpt to desthroy wan iv his fell
low-citizens. killed a cow belongin' to tn
janial colonel. TIL two gintlemen had
sworn FIR to slay each other at sight or
thirty days, an all Kentucky society has
been on what Hogan calls tn quee veev,
or look out, FIR another thrageedy to be
added to tn long list iv similar ivints that
marks tn histhry iv tn dark an bloody
groun'-which is a name given to Ken
lucky be her affectionate sons
without a wur-rud or a bow both gin
tlemen dhrew on each other an begun
deadly fusillade. That is, Hinnissy. they
begun shootin' at tn bystanders. I'll tell
we what tn pa-apers said about it. TIL
two antagonists was in perfect form an
we'll sustained TIL reputation iv tn State
rr acc'rate craftsmanship. Colonel Der
ringers first shot caught boot and shoe
drummer firm Chicago square in tn back
amid consid'r able applause. Major Lyddite
tied tn scoor be nailin' a scrub woman on
tn top iv a ladder. TIL man at tn traps
sprung a belboy, whom tn colonel on'y
winged, thus goin' back wan, but his sec
ond barrel caught a book canvasser firm
New York. an, this bein a Jew man, STINT
him three ahead. TIL major had an aisy
wan FIR tn head waiter. nailin him jist
as he jumped into a coal hole. Tn
colonel thried difficult polsman,
lamin' him. Thin tn major turned
his attintion to his own frinds an made
three twos in succession. TIL colonel was
not so forch'nate. He caught Major Bulls