The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1900-04-12

once.
ait Is nothing" said Widger; that Is,
II is nothing serious. l came near writ
ing a real poem Instead of a Jingle, that
IL ALL"
81 call that rather serious" said Per-
k.ns. Heavens! Billy, you must go
slow. You're on the verge of some
thing. A chap of your talent cannot be
too careful"
"Sop said Widger lazlly. "You make
me weary, Perk. What do you know
about poetry and its relation to neu-
rotic exhaustion. Do you consider the
production OF real poetry an Indication
OF weakness at the nerve centers. DO
you"
srSo, but see here, Billy; I've pre-
pared the Hints to Housekeepers' and
the Food and Health columns for this
paper regularly for three years now
and"
"You have also prepared the Aunt
Jerusha's Talks with Girls" column,
interrupted Widger. "You are a vile
humbug, Perk.'
"No more so than you, Billy. Don't
wound my sensitive heart, kind friend,
I pray you. The Record Is avowedly
the most popular paper in the Missls-
sippi Valley among the women. Whyi
TITS I. Billy, me.
Who tells the women how to cook,
And make their homes successful;
Who tells them how that pimply look
i T. a tctra hi
Me, Billy, I-oswood X. Perkins, the
poor orphan, who wouldn't know how
to act II he had home. That's the
secret Of my success, Billy; I'm orig
inal."
because you do not know any bet
ter"
Exactly. But as to yourself. You're
supposed TO be funny. Your stuff is
well liked. Some people actually laugh
at IL. Your verses Jingle pleasantly,
and your paragraphs are redolent of
ginger. You hold your Job. You eat.
But. Billy, dear, 'twould be very DIFF
ferent II you should blunder into poet
ry-real poetry, as you call II. You'd
lose your Job. You'd cease to eat.
Your nerves, deprived of the food they
crave, would become toneless, snap
less. Prostratlon, agony, lingering
death, unwept. unhonored, unsung.
Don't do 1t. Billy"
Widger smiled.
"Perk," said he, you are a freak.
But you are wise-you must be or you
wouldn't be able to humbug the women
as you do. You are also a gentleman,
and 1 believe a good Judge Of"
"Whlskyr
mo, poetry" IT
"Um-m-I don't know"
at do Read that, and tell me what
you think"
Perkins took the proffered sheet with
affected timidity, and looked at It from
the corners of his eyes Then he hand
ed II back.
"It's pretty bad, Billy" said he hon
estly. II don't think l ever read
worse.
Memory grim doth rend my heartstrlngs,
Cruelty with fingers pink.
is but little short of positive disease.
Do you feel perfectly well, old manY'
Eyes, am well enough, but am de.
pressed in spirit. Do you suppose,
Perk"-glancing at the clock-"that II
I gave you my confidence for about fl.
teen minutes 1t would seriously inter.
fere with the glorious work you are do
ing for benighted women? l think II
would make me feel better"
Nothing" replied Perkins firmly
"can interfere with that. Go ahead
old man."
i He sat back in his chair with an In
dex finger on either side OF his nose
his Characteristic attitude when In re
pose, as he once informed the Records
cartoonist when that brilliant but mis-
guided young man begged him for |
"sitting"-while Widger slowly gath
cred the sheets from his desk and tor
them into strips.
you know where l came from
Perk ~ he asked, dropping the strip
into the waste basket.
"St. Paul, Billy. You didn't know
the letter ] from hole In the ground
and you considered Minneapolis mere
" a short chapter in mythology"
"Yes," said Widger. AT st. Paul,
worked on the Evening Gazette and NJ
duties were as the sands Of the sea.
did everything, from heavy editorial
the hotels, and between jumps fell !
love. 1t may not altogether be m
fault. Some men are born lovers, som
cultivate the tendency, and some hay
II thrust upon them. 1t was thrus
upon me. And the maiden's name wa
Smith"
"Smith-Smith," mumbled Perkln,
'in all the bright lexicon of youth ther
Is no such word as-go on, Billy"
"She was nice girl. as girls go,
continued Widger, swell set head, nor
pareil body, good clear face and tn
daughter Of her father, who owned th
Gazette. She was accustomed to spend
ing an hour or two each day at the OF
fee. and had not talked with he
many times before | experienced
strange sensation. did not know
what to call 1t. suppose 1t was love
but never said word about 1t to hel
! l reasoned that 1t would be too pre
! sumptuous-might lose me my situa
! ton.
! Il did not know then that was qua
lied to do anything better in the news
paper line than to grind on the Gazett
at ground pay. ! made myself wretch
ed at times wishing she would kee
away from the office. so that NIGH
forget her. But I drew long breat
OF relief the next time she appeared
and answered. her questions about tn!