The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1900-06-09
He Forces B0isterOus Banquet
ers to Hear Him.
Wild SCENES ENACTED
Toast Makers Squirm on the
Gridiron of the Club.
Mirth and Jollity Are In Full
Control.


placed its members and guests on the
gridirOn and toasted and roasted them
Not one escaped the ordeal of attempt
MS 70 address what seemed to be a con
Eent1on OF naniacs- The Midway dur
ing its pellieSf DAYS with its snake
eaters. wild men and talking horses. its
machine pianos. tom toms and frying
pans, its spielerS and roaring lions was
not even an Imitation of the annual
banquet It was the largest and
noisiest banquet ever given BY the club
when the eighteen members of the
club and their invited and unlimited
guests, as Tom MeNeal divided the
Iarty. fled into the dining room an
the ThrooD hotel Friday night at
o'clock the lOEg banquet table was in
perfect order and the linen was spot
less The president gracioUSly an
bounced this august assemblase may
now De seated" Four hours later, when
ar adjournment had been reached and
II was roughly announced that the
crowd may go" the table was topsy
tuFNy and there were footprints on the
side OF politics. business and society
had been forgotten and every speaker
had either retired under a storm Of rid
4cule or spoken uRheard against a noise
equal 10 that Of boiler factory No
one has ever escaped the jioeS OF the
club There is but one man at large
who has been able to quen the United
States senate-JohH J, Ingalls,, but he
Is wise enough 10 be in Arizona when
the saturday nighters come together.
He is said to be On the list for next
year.
The fun started when Albert Wat
kInS, the retiring president, arose to de-
liver his farewell address. He started
by saying Gentlemen" The rest Of his
introduction was drowned by shouts
and hand clappins. and the members
started toward the door. but out OF
Difference TO the guests did not leave
h. er-5ss
chairs ereaked on the tile floor.
7 move that be stricken OUT shout
ed the member from Oregon
Louder" shouted ALL
The president beamed through his
glasses but was not heard Judge
L S Ferry was called upon to speak
about Chewing the Rag" He spoke
about the tablets Of memory"
DO they come in boxes or bottles?''
From prehistoric continued the
speaker.
He's calling you fossil shouted
Robert Stone to G. c Clemens
IN close my remarks
~Hurrah. hurrahs''
BY saying that Martin Luther tired
o. his diet Of worms and chewed the
rag"
D. c. TiIlotsOu was next on the list
to answer TO the toast a Voice from
the Past" He took Mr. Clemens who
cannot hear. 10 the end of the table
and talked to him regardless of the
antics Of the crowd
I now wish to introduce a man able
TO speak on the subject of pay roll, -
said President Watkins
Wen see
"Trot him cut
I take pleasure IN introducing Gov
ernor Stanley, said the president.
Who's he2"
Il move we give three cheers for
Stanley, shouted a W Dana as he
&
HOray- horay, hOray," shouted Dana
in a loud voice. Not another person
cheered- A silence fearful and ominous
settled upon the assemblage-
The governor looked embarrassed
since that does not seem to meet
your approval I now propose three
cheers for the only other candidate for
governor present said Mr. Dana
Three cheers were given that made
the chandeliers tremble. Every men,
Der and guest joined with all the lung
power he possessed in honoring Glenn
ems.
The governor laughed. I'm obliged
/ to Dana for his three cheers" he said.
He only made two"
Go on, go on"
Governor Stanley read a confidential
/ letter from Tom AcNeal advising him
( that the club would treat him roughly.
He had another from Eugene Ware.
I The poet explained that when the club
was at its worst his poetry always
/ soOthed the mem erS and he enclosed
I the following for the governor TO read:
/ "Hinky. Hanky. Pinkey. Panky,
am queen of ShinSy Shanky.
{ And I'm pretty well, thank ee.
In regard TO parole there are two
I essential rules" said the governor
That good behavior counts and sec
+ ond OffenseS Will not be. pardoned-'
How about the rule Of pay roll.
} shouted Ed Mckeever.
a. nm ffv7ai al n
+ is required" said the speaker
I I move such sighting remarks
! about his private secretary by stricken
out" shouted Tom McNeaL
If any Of you apply for parole yoJ
| must remember the rules.
4 move that j roster Of the club b
/ furnished the governor. said MI Til
T lotson- The governor really made ar
{ excellent showing and some Of nj
speech was heard
Robert Stone spoke on Our Lega
/ status He said; This club mus
/ come under the arm OF the law
This club comes under nothing,
shouted Mr.. McNeaL
out Of modesty am unable to max.
! the remarks 1 intended.
Let Frank Foster make them,
shouted Major Harvey
Our members have fallen until som'
Of them have worn the ernline OF tn
police court" continued the speaker
Did the man say vernin3" inquiries
McNeaL
one member has made a police eour
record that will be remembered through
the echoinS corridors Of time
WHAT"
''F'lighty."
BY securing for humanity the IN
+ alierable right 10 walk diagonal.
across the state house grounds"
F. L. Nandegrift spoke on "Hedg
Fences" He said: This is the great
est scheme in Kansas It beats Gov
eruor Sta1fey's scheme for chasing tn
bed bugs on of the state. / have foun
that members Of the Saturday nigh
club are noted for wit but / have faiIei
10 see il so far"
We don't notice any now.
Go on
( How can man make a Speec
/ II