The Kootenai herald. [volume] (Kootenai, Idaho) 1891-1904, 1900-10-12

"I'm accommodating too many books"
SIS that so? Well, quit writing your
name in them, and you'll lose them fast
enough. "-Indianap Journal
''They say Miss Singleton is a trans
migrationist." "YesI She thinks she
must once have been the wicked flea
whom no man pursuethv'-Life.
Fair Painter-I hope you don't mind
my sketching in your field? Farmer
Lord, no, missiel You keep the birds
off the peas better'n a. ordinary scare
crow.-Tit-Bits.
CRATER must have turned over q
new leaf. He tells me he's working
night and day" Eyes, that's the firm
he's with now" "WhatT Knight &
Day."-Philadelphi Press.
Hoax-I understand the doctor said
yesterday that there was very little
hope in your rich uncle's case. Joax-
les even worse to-day. He's very much
Observation-Disclosures Record.
Shocking: "They say the young man
Melissa Perkins is goin' to marry is
regular paragon" Land sakesl Do
tell thought he was clerk in gro
Chicago Times Herald.
"What do you suppose makes your
baby sister cry so?" asked visitor OF
small Johnny. ST guess it must BE-
cause she is hatchin' her teeth" re-
piled the youthful Chicago
News.
what makes you think he is man
of little tact?" 'He joined Don't
Worry Club the second day after he
was married. and didn't know enough
to keep it secret "-Chicago Times
Herald.
School Teacher-What little boy can
tell me where is,sthe home of the swal-
low? Bobby kin, please. School
Teacher-Well, Bobby? Bobby-The
home of the swallow is the stummick.
-Tit-Bits.
Dcctor-What you need is change
and rest. Patient-I can't afford it.
My incomes pretty well requisitioned
already. My children get all the change,
and my wife gets the rest.-Philadel-
phia Press.
Georgy ION the warpath)-Say, Eddy,
did Harry hit you? Eddy-No. Georgy
Did Jimmy hit you? Eddy-Nope.
Georgy-Well, if nobody hasn't hit you
1 will. I've got to lick some one.-Chi-
cago News.
All that He Asked: Miss Lulu Elan
nigan-I will give yez my answer in a
month, Pat. He-Thats right, me dar-
lint; TEX plinty av time to think it over.
But tell me wan thing now-will it be
yes or noT-Judge.
Old Lady pointing to elevated rail-
road)-Where do them cars go to? City
Man Observation-Disclosures anywhere you
want, ma'am. Old Lady-Land sakesl
l thought they had to stay on the rails.
New York Weekly.
Fuddy-They have a deal to say
about the brotherhood of man." and
yet wars and rumors of wars continue.
Duddy-Thats all right. There always
has been more or less fighting in fam
llies.-Boston Transcript.
Tess-So she's to marry the son of the
wealthy Mr.. Millyuns. How on earth
did she manage to land him, l wonder7
Jess-Shes musical, you know, and so
it's no trouble at all for her to catch an
heir.-Philadelphi Press.
Proud Parent-If you call in the even
ing you probably will hear my daugh-
ter singing. Artless Friend-Oh, I
sha'n't mind that You ought to hear
the fellow down our way practicing on
the cornet. 1t is simply awfuL-Boston
Transcript.
my boy" said the first proud papa,
"has bad habit of interrupting me
when I'm talking. Your boy isn't old
enough for that yet" NO" replied
the other, ''my boy contents himself
with interrupting me when I'm sleep
ing. '-Philadelphia Press.
1--WE got up another crowd and ran
away from those people we camped
out with last year" "Did they dis
cover itT Hull When we arrived
at the ground we found they had made
up another crowd and had run away
from s."-Indianapolis Journal.
Ratios of Travel: mike" said Plod-
ding Pete, do you believe In dis six
teen to one?" Sometimes 1 do" an
swered Meandering Mike, ian some
times l don't. 1t depends on whether
it's sixteen meals to one mile or six
teen miles to one meal. Washing
Star.
Mrs. Moveabout-Yes, 1 like that
} house you sent me to see. 1t will be
much cooler for the summer, but the