davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Gardnerville record. (Gardnerville, Nev.) 1898-1902, 1900-05-31

Baruu, ma Excuse.

p. T. Barnum's propensity for practi-
cal joking began early to assert itself
Once a man was on trial Ia local
court for a small misdemeanor. Learn
Ing that he had no money to hire law
yer, Barnum offered TO conduct his de
Tense. With great solemnity he made
a lengthy plea in which he virtually
accused his client of being guilty OF
half the crimes on the calendar. end
Ing with a recommendation to the mer-
cy of the court on the ground of un-
sound mind
The man, though escaping with "A
merely nominal sentence. WAS furious
at the trick that had been played on
him. He was finally appeased by Bar
NUNS explanation that he had pre-
pared defense for two different ell
ents and had in his case delivered the
wrong plea--Maitland Leroy Osborne
In National Magazine.
Gardnerville record. (Gardnerville, Nev.) 1898-1902, 1900-05-31

4 young clerk received instructions
from the proprietor OF a produce house
In Front street some days ago to put
into case OF eggs card marked
Guaranteed"
The proprietor thought no more about
the matter until later In the day, when
he was called to the phone by the pur-
chaser.
Il don't want these eggs" he said.
"What Is the matter with then? y
asked the proprietor.
"They are marked 'Quarantined' and
are too suggestive Of disease"
II developed later that the clerk had
written "Quarantlned" instead of
Guaranteed" Scimltar.
Gardnerville record. (Gardnerville, Nev.) 1898-1902, 1900-05-31

Ben Inprint--Say my wife, Mrs. Ben
Imprint, and two children, Lucy and
John, are away on visit to her Uncle
Join them over Sunday.
New Reporter tproducing notebook)
Give me the names OF tue children
again. please.
Ben Imprint Goodness! Ye ain't go
In TO put II in yer paper, are yeY
New Reporter Intended to, but of
course II you'd rather III not mention
il. Good day.
Ben Imprint Why didn't keep my
blame mouth shut. That Teller must
be new.-Ohio State Journal.
Gardnerville record. (Gardnerville, Nev.) 1898-1902, 1900-05-31
FOOTWEAR FOR ALL.

The most complete line Of Ladies,
Gents Misses, Boys and chidren's sehos,
rcmodelled and fixed up, and are now ready
for your trade. We offer all the inducements
in low prices good reliable gools of revy
best manufactures in the East and West
Our Gents $3.50 Walk Over shoe is among
our specialties. Ladies Queen Quality $500.
All styles. Your mail or express orders
will receive prompt attention We are de-
termined to secure your trade at all hazards.
A full line of leather, nails, and all mater
lal for repairing.
E. BURLINGTON, cARSON.
Gardnerville record. (Gardnerville, Nev.) 1898-1902, 1900-05-31

Yesterday | met George as ! got on
the car and | said, Hello, George,
how're you getting onY Then he said.
4 ain; getting on, Pm getting on.
"Welly'
To-day met him as | was getting
off the car and | said, Hello George
how're you getting on? Then he said,
L amt getting ON Mt all, Pm putting
my mcther.in-law on Chicago Rec
ord.
Gardnerville record. (Gardnerville, Nev.) 1898-1902, 1900-05-31

80 Industry except thai az cloth
manufacture has contributed 80 murh
10 lhe comfort and advancement "f
man as that of gmssmaking. winch Is
ole OF the oldest of technical Iudlus
tries. Its earliest home was Egypt.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

Down in Negros General Smith has
for some months been engaged in the
guerilla kind of fighting, and he has
been able to crush 1t out. When q
depreciation was committed near or
in town on the island he promptly
imposed q heavy fine on the place.
After doing this several times tho cit
izens resolved themselves into sort
Of vigilance committee as a matter of
financial preservation, and the depre-
dations ceased with startling sudden
ness.
The Tagalos, however, are more
tenacious and vindictive in their
fighting than the Visayans of Negros,
and it will require the most stringent
measures and vigorous pursuit to put
them down. With Aguinaldo loose
in the islands the work will be harder
and more dangerous and much more
lasting.
A column of cavalry moving through
the Luzon country is an extremely
picturesque sight. Five or six hun
dred big American horses strung out
in columns of twos make very long
and imposing line, and when the troop
ers wear Their rough-service uniforms,
as they do out here, the effect is such
as would be produced by a regiment
of mounted cowboys.
Just behind the headquarters staff
come the squadron oflicers--the major
and his staff. Behind them ride the
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

nlrymans full kit consists Of bride,
n halter, saddle, saddlebags, blanket
roll, poDcho, carbine, carbine boot,
lariat, picket pin, nosebag, curry comb
aud brush, saber, two horseshoes (ilt-
ted to his horsc), some horseshoe
nails, 140 rounds of carbine ammuni
tion, a Colt revolver and twenty-five
rounds of pistol ammunition aud q
canteen. In addition to these things
he has his saddlebag more or less
filed with rations. When cavalry
mau is mounted, with iingling spurs
and blue flannel shirt, thrown open at
tho neck, with his felt campaign hat
tipped rakishly over one eye, girt up
with all his paraphernalia for the fray,
he makes very interesting total and
is likely to inspire respect in those who
see him. Several hundred of him,
mounted on big sixteen-h hand American
horses, distinctively multiply the inn
pressiveness of the picture.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

Among the most unreasoning fads
OF the day is the low-necked summer
cape. An idea of the arrangement may
be had from the accompanying small
sketch reproduced from the Chicago
Times Herald. The cape is made Of
peau de sole and trimmed either with
liberty silk runles or heavy silk fringe.
IL is contrived especially to reveal the
wide guimpe or yoke of the bodice be-
meath, and is avowedly moro orna-
mental than useful.
The same craze has manifested it,
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

For lace dress worn over n lnce
slip, you can have n tunic In
Grecque, draped in oil one piece, in o
fashion copied from the classical
drapery noted in the friezes Of Hellenic
architecture or on some antique vase.
In case this place is adopted, remem-
ber to follow the line unbroken from
the left shoulder downward and over
to the right hip, from which point the
drapery can he adjusted as You will 30
"a TO secure symmetrical habit.
Keep the lines as long rs you possibly
cail.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

identical article worn by our grand
mothers in ''antebellum days"
"Double sleeve" is another name for
it. All the smart challies and foulards
boast this arm covering, which, of the
foulard or challie, ends at the elbow,
while underneath falls scant fluff of
white muslin net or lace, its fulness
gathered into close band at the
wrist The first figure Of the cut, re-
produced from the New York Even
ing Sun, shows pretty frock in mot.
tied foulard having undersleeves and
yoke in transparent net. Embroidery
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

pines: The organized insurrection is
practically at an end, and, therefore,
the troops have to deal only with
guerilla bands and outlaws. Yet in
the last forty days the American
forces here have lost more men, more
arms and more supplies in the So
called pacified districts than during
any previous period of like length
since the insurrection began.
If this is what guerilla warfare
means, then we will need more troops
some day, for the new method of
fighting is proving more effective than
any style that the insurgents have en-
ployed previously.
Almost every day brings n report of
some fresh ambuscade wherein small
forces Of our troops are attacked by a
hundred or more Filipinos. Usually
one or more Of our men are killed,
and the rest are driven away by sheer
force of overwhelming numbers. Then
follows punitive expedition, but
these sorties seldom find trace Of the
enemy.
Invariably the insurgents know the
, exac, strength of the force they are
ambushing, for they usually lie in
wait for small groups of ten or fifteen
men, which they permit to approach
so close that their first volley kills or
wounds most of them, and leaves the
rest utterly demoralized.
Insurgents who live within our
lines, who are amigos in the daytime
and enemies at night, have been par
ticularly pernicioue. 1t is now un-
safe, more than ever before, to move
in small numbers, even in the dis
tricts which are presumably pacified
by the presence of strong earrisons.
The rank and file of the people in
the towns are in full sympathy with
these marauding raids, for they never
Gender help by word or deed which
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06
Outing Costumes.

OutlnE COstuIhcb.
Although wheeling hasn't nearly so
many devotees among the fashi9nables
as it had several Years ago, the fair
society belle still rides in desultory
fashion and still keeps correct and
up-to-date wheeling costume in good
order in her wardrobe. There is not
much difference between the bicycle
costume as prescribed by fashion now
and that worn for golfng, only the
golf skirt is little longer. AS wom-
en- are riding in much longer skirts
at the present time the majority Of
them make the one costume do for
both.
Another thing, the rainy-day OF
short skirt is so much the vogue,
even for clear days, that several find
place among ma bellies gowns.
The Two new ideas shown in the large
cut will serve equally well as bicycle,
golf, outing or rainy-day gowns. and
are reproduced from Harper's Bazar
The side-pleated shirt waist of the
first one is most attractive model
for any shirt.waist, either OF wash
goods or silk, for utility or dressier
wear. The front has a centre stitched
band and three deep outward.turning
pleats from shoulder to waist. The
back is similar, only with box-pleat
in the centre. The design of the skirt,
with its unusual yoke effect, is es-
pecially suited to heavy galatea pique
or very light weight two-toned cloth.
This yoke is quite fashionable with
New York women, and gives quite a
trimmed appearance to an otherwise
plain skirt.
The salient feature OF the brown
covert cloth one, trimmed with
stitched bands, shown at the right,
is its charmingly unique little jacket.
This is belted in at the back, and
fashions autocrats aver it is sure to be
popular, as 1t is so practicable, besides
looking we'll either in wash goods or
heavy material. The hat is also a
good one. as it is soft and becoming,
yet it shades the eyes, too. 1t is Of
the latest style, heavy linen, corded
with black velvet and trimmed around
the crown with bands and rosettes Of
the.velvet
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

self in evening wraps. A full length,
somewhat box-shaped coat, narrow at
the top and widened decidedly at the
bottom, is made low-necked in front
in accordance with this new caprice.
The material employed is amber col
ored brocade, and it is lined with pale
yellow liberty satin. About the
shoulders is wide, round marine
collar OF Venice lace, sloped down
quite low. The sleeves, which hang
in bell-shape from the shoulders, are
heavily incrusted with Venice lace
about the lower part, both on the out
side and on the inside. Down the
full length of the front the wrap lacks
four inches of coming together. Both
edges are trimmed with long folded
piece of pale yellow satin, held at reg
ular intervals with square pearl
buckles. A fichu or q silk scarf OF
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06
Sentiment and business.

The junior partner, on the other
hand, believed in mingling sentiment
with business, and suggested this
form of advertisement:
"Let Us Eat, Drink and Be
Merry"
Table Supply Department, Ground
Floor.
"For Tomorrow we Die!"
Coffin and Tombstone Departm .nt
in Basement.
"Take the Elevator"
ETC., etc.-Puck.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

days, as many moro have been killed
and wounded, almost hundred rifles
and great deal Of ammunition has
been lost and big quantity OF rations
has fallen into the enemy's hands.
Most of these depredaiions have oc-
cured in the territory which we now
are supposed to hold, and oil the en-
gagements would come under the head
Of ambushes and assassinations.
There is certainly new condition
of warfare confronting the troops. The
time is evidently gone for big, impos-
ing columns to march sedately through
the country, columns so big that the
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

will aid our troops in locating nd
whipping the guerilla bands, although
ii is certain that they are always aware
of the plans and prospective move.
ments of these bands.
Even to-day there is not native in
Manila, friendly though he may pro-
fess himself to be, who will breathe q
word as to Aeuinaldo's whereabouts,
yet there are doubtless thousands who
know exactly where he is, and many
who doubtless are in constant COM
munication with him.
The list of our losses by bolo men
and ambushes in the occupied dis
tricts since January l is rather start
ling.
A list which I have selected from
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06
A Genuine "Horse Marine."

When war breaks out, bringing
with 1t hurry call for cavalrymen
and mounted infantry, the efforts of
recruits to master horsemanship in
so short time are lu licrous. To
avert this a dummy horse has been
invented on which unaccustomed
soldiers may practice mounting, dis
mounting and other equestrian feats
which require long practice. Such
dummies are carried on transports and
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06
Chameleon Postal Cards.

Italy is essentially the land of post
cards. The latest postcard is shot
with various colors, so that the hues
change il the card is regarded from
different angles. The colors, more.
over, are made Of sensitive chemical
ingredients which are effected by
changes in the weather to the extoni
Of altering their colors.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

the recruits go through daily drill
with them, thus learning, by the time
they reach their destination, the rudi-
ments of horsemanship and rendering
their subsequent lessons ON real
horses less awkward and slow. The
''silent steeds" are OF the average
height of the army troop horse, and
the saddle and other accoutrements
are of the regulation cavalry type.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

New YoRK CRY Especially. - OF
course the very newest sleeve devel-
opment-'the sleeve of The year." rs
1t 10 called--is the undersleeve. As
the cut shows, II is much like the
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

insurgents deem IL imprudent TO offer
opposition. When the column has
passed, they come out of the woods
and fall upon the little bands Of strng-
glcrs and outposts aud signal corps
men.
From now on the guerilla methods
must be met by smaller and more mo-
bile forces. General Lawton, with
his great experience in this method of
waging war, would have been quick to
adjust himself to the new conditions.
General Bell pre'eminently qualified
for the kind of work that will now
have to be done, while General Funs-
ton, whose Cuban experience has fitted
him well to meet the new conditions,
will undoubtedly adjust his tactics to
meet those Of the insurgents.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06
NEW AND NOVEL OUTING COSTUMES.

over velvet trims the foulard, while
the left side of the bodice is fastened
with silver buttons and clasps. The
other cut shows o simpler undersleeve
model, but one equally effective. The
turn.back finish of the upper sleeve is
known as the puritan cuff"
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06
Fitted with Darts.

One feature of French underclothes
is that they are never made with
yokes. They are fitted with darts,
and where fullness is necessary it is
gathered in with ribbon or tape.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06
cCCCcCCoccooCocCcoocCcoCI
! campaigning In
! THE PHILIPPINES.
Ambuscadcs Have Cost Americans
More Relatively Than I,cgu-
lar Warfare.

John T. McCutcheon, the Manila
correspondent Of the Chicago Record.
writes as follows in regard to the
progress Of the war in the Philip.
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

the 6les Of = daily paper. and doubt
less far from complete. shows that
about forty men have been captured
By the insurgents in the last forty
The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1900-06-06

troop commanders. and then the first
troop. Each cavalry regiment con-
sists OF twelve troops Of 100 men each,
the regiment being divided equally
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1900-03-26

City remarks: 1.-THE house has never
seemed more popular than In the last few
weeks"
Augustus Thomas, author Of Stuart Rob-
sons new comedy. Olive Goldsmith"
went TO "A town a short distance from New
York. n few weeks ago, TO consult with
Robson as TO whether any changes were
needed In the play. AS he was about 10
register at the hotel where he proposed
to stop. Mr.. Thomas heard the clerk say
10 a friend: Talk about oliver Goldsmith
being great, Why. it's simply stuff and
nonsense. It's just the actors that have
made something out of 1t. IL isn't a marker
to Thomas's 'Alabama'-what do you think
of il. Stranger" turning to the dramatist.
Thomas mumbled something and then
signed his name on the ledger in plain let
tiers, and when the clerk looked the sigma
ture over he fairly gasped in astonishnient.
Later In the day he accosted Mr.. Thomas
in the hotel LOBBY as follows: There Is no
doubt, sir, that your play Is "A fne one;
the critics all praise IL. and the public likes
IL. too. But you see they had an advantage
over me in my not having read the book of
oliver Goldsmith. Will you have a cigar?"
NO" gasped Thomas. staggered by this
last blow; but you might send me a copy
of the book. / haven't read 1T, either
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1900-03-26
Kansas City Star.

Kansas City Star.
Gen. Lew Wallace proposes a constitu-
ti0nal amendment providing that the
United States shall never assume turisdic-
ton or sovereignty over any island, terri
tory or country now foreign, except with
the certified consent OF the people OF the
United States. There does not seem any
pressing need for any such amendment.
The people OF the United States lave never
opposed the expansion OF their country. Oc-
casional politicians may have done so, but
the mass of the people never have. Had
the people been opposed TO IL the govern
ment would never have. acquired Louisiana,
nor California. nor Alaska. No administers
ton would ever have taken steps for the
formal annexation Of any territory I'm the
face of the majority OF the people OF the
United States expressed in the many ways
in their power. Expansion has proceeded.
since the foundation of the government.
because the sovereign people OF the United
States nave always believed in IL. as they
still do and will continue 20.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1900-03-26
THEOsOPHY AND BRYANIsM.
Suggestion that the First BE Inserted
i'm the Democratic Platform.
New York Sun.

The Hon. William Pitt Atkinson, a hum
of the Mahatmas, has been telling the In
diana T~heosophical Society about theos-
ophy, the headlight OF civilization and the
his most impassioned moments Mr.. Adkin-
son is almost as sublime as the Hon. Eu-
gene Victor Debs. Hear him sing the head
light and cornerstone:
superstition, Ignorance. tyranny. oppres-
sion. kingcraft. priestcraft. may hover as a
dark cloud over the nations and may sweep
Ike a ~blighting simeon across the CONT
nents. crushing. blasting, whitening and
clearing every green and beautiful thing
until theosophy comes. but when the new
cycle comes, when theosophy looks forth
as the morning. fair as the moon. clear as
the sun and irresistible as an army with
banners, then all these denominations of the
earth fade away. Then there is a new
heaven and a new earth, and man, woman
and child put on the cap of liberty and
dance tiptoe on the mountain"
AT present there Is very little dancing
tiptoe on the mountain. For education,
lone OF the luminous bodies of theosophy."
is far from luminous, and football, base
ball, prize fighting. board of trade swind-
ling. gambling i'm stocks and bonds and
manufacturing millionaires have degraded
the whole school system" But there IS q
remedy. divine theosophy:
"In t~heosophy no political dude Is made
the special trustee of the gods TO feed the
buzzards Of Wall street and stand on the
necks of the farmers of the prairies of the
West and the islanders OF the sea. Under
the banner OF theosophy the red Indian OF
the woods. the black man OF Africa and the
brown man of Porto Rico and the man who
is white outside all stand equal"
So theosophy must be just what the DEM
ocrats are looking for. Theosophy will
teach them to shoe the buzzards OF Wall
street and keep the political dudes from the
necks of the farmers of the West. Ii ought
to be inserted into the Kansas City plat
form. The Nebraska Democratic platform
go -
endum. with that and theosophy. what
NAV not be done?
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1900-03-26
DISTRIBUTION OF SEEDS.
How the Work Is Done by the Ex-
pertinent Station at Purdue.

"A great number of requests" said Dr.
rector c.. s. Plumb. "have been received a.
the Indiana experiment station for free
sorghum seed. Several journals have pub
lished the statement that this station
would distribute sorghum seed free to APP
plicants. from seed sent the station by the
United States Department of Agriculture
for this purpose.
1.-The station has received no sorghum
seed from the government, and has none
for distribution. neither has any been sup
piled 1t for this purpose. All statements
that the station would supply sorghum
seed were based on information not pos
sessed by the station itself. and the sta
ton assumes no responsibility for any such
statements.
The station has received from the
United States Department of Agriculture a
limited amount of sugar beet seed for dis
tribution in Indiana. This seed has been
sent to this State to be distributed at the
discretion Of the station. 1t will be sent to
applicants free of charge. so long as the
supply lasts. and to such applicants as will
consent to plant the seed and grow the
crop under the direction of the station. The
sugar beet seed used for distribution is in
tended for experimental purposes. hat the
resulting crop may yield further informa-
ton concerning the adaptability of Indiana
in the production of beets containing suf-
ficient sugar for profitable manipulation by
beet sugar factories. This seed is of SUI
pertor grade, imported from the most re-
liable European seed houses, and so is de-
sirable for our purposes. Beet seed is sub
ject to marked variation in quality, and
this government seed may be depended on
as of high grade.
Those who apply to the station for
seed should state what kind of soil is avail
able for the test and how much land will
be planted. Seed will be supplied for areas
of one-eighth acre to one acre, and will
only be sent to those who will grow the
beets subject to instructions sent from
this station and with the understanding
that in the fall sample beet roots will be
forwarded the station for making sugar
determination of the same. The seed will
be sent through the mail free of expense,
and the beets may be mailed to the station
In the fall free of cost.
A applications for seed should be sent
in at an early date. so that seed may be
distributed in March"