Holbrook argus., 1900-12-01
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 Horace Greeley once had discus sion with an advocate of woman suffrage shortly before the civil war, says the Woman's Journal. He was using, as his final argument, the inability of women to fight. What would you do, for instance" he asked his friend, ''in the event of war;" Just what you would do. MT. Greeley" she replied, promptly. q should stay in an office and write articles urging other people | to go and fight"
 Among all the horrors of war, hu morous situations often occur. An English army surgeon in South Africa tells an amusing story of an English woman of high rank who was en- | crossed by the charms of amateur nurs- | ing. One morning, on approaching the cot of soldier to whom she had given especial attention, she found him with his eyes tightly closed and piece of paper pinned on the sheet, on which was written: "Too i'll to be nussed to- day. Respectfully, J. L."
 The late John J. Ingalls, was em- ployed by certain flash newspapers to write accounts of all sorts of events and sign his name to them. In the course of his contact with the sporting fraternity the ex-senator made the ac- quaintance of John l.. Sullivan, and one day, after examing the pugilist's muscles and beating a tattoo on his chest, he asked: Sullivan, why don't you enter the ring again and try to win the championship from CorbettT "For the same reason" answered Sullivan, ''that you didn't enter the race for sen ator; consider one knockout enough"
 Colenel Daniel R. Anthony, brother of Susan B. Anthony, and the last of the fighting editors of Kansas, is on record as the only man who has had his aorta severed and lived. In a newspaper feud with gambler named Jennison, Anthony was shot. The doctor told him he could not live. The wounded man did not say anything but bade his sister good-by and went to sleep. When he awoke he asked the nurse: "What time is it? "Six o'clock" replied the nurse. The colonel chuckled for moment, then said: "Say, that's a good joke on the doctor, isn't it? He said I'd be dead at five-thirty." He fell asleep again, and when he awoke the doctor acknowledged his mistake.
 There is no such luxury as privacy to him whose name is heralded far and wide. Some, no doubt, enjoy the dis tinotinr1 h11t fha 1oi ri the intrusion. Goethe once arrived at such pitch of irascibility by reason of the prying curiosity of visitors that, when a tourist would not be denied. he descended from his study, lighted can dle in hand, and without a word of greeting merely placed the candle on table and sat still. In nowise daunted by the cold reception, the tourist calmly seized the candle and went round and round the great man, examining his physiognomy with deliberate scrutiny. Whereupon the poet broke into a laugh and ordered wine. And this persistent visitor, needless to remark, was an American.
 At one of their joint discussions, WHICH lOOk pldce III Aentucky some years ago, Tom Stuart, then editor of the Winchester Democrat, gave his op- ponent, I. N. Boone, a descendant of the great Daniel, blow that fairly knock ed him out of the race for the leg islature. Boone was making his regular speech, and at the proper place in it he referred to the matter of his relation to the toiling masses. "My friend" said he, holding up a pair of hands that looked as if they had not been washed in week, "to let you see for yourself that I am a horny-handed son of toll, ask you to look at these hands, and," turning to Stuart, q would ask my pale-faced young friend from the city what he thinks of them?" Stuart was on his feet In a minute. q do not desire to embarass my distin- guished opponent, ladies and gentle men," he said with bow, "but would say that I think that they need soap and water" It was such an apparent case that the crowd took hold at once with shout, and Boone was complete. ly hoored, and later Stuart was elected.