Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1900-02-03
IN A SHOOTING COUNTRY

Eyes, siree." said the laxative man in
the lunch room, "the people down that way
are heap on the shoot, and no mistake.
They had me hopping a wing dance all the
time 1 was there, keeping out Of range OF
their artillery. and forty times the balls
whizzed SO close to my ears that could
just shut my eyes and hear the hum Of the
celestial harps. They just like to shoot
down that way, and that's all there Is
about it. It's part of the game, shooting.
and you're not in the wade at all If you
don't make some kind of bluff at shoot
ing, anyhow. Was walking down the street
the last time I was down there. when
couple of fellows, coming from opposite
directions, met.
Pretty raw day, huh, Zeb? says one
to the other.
Raw, nothin'.' says the other: It's
just the right kind of a day, and 1t suits
me down to the ground
Bling, bang! went their guns at the
same instant, and they were SO close to
me at the time that 1 thought l heard the
wind moaning through the reeds on the
banks of the River Jordan. When 1 Owed
into a doorway and turned to look around
an express cart was takin' EN- both 10
the undertaker's. That's what you'd call
quick action, hey?
Another time was walking with
good-ratured man I met down there, when
one of his griends came along.
f1OWUy, JlIn, says ne u Tie L
was walking with. Hear you've got a
new twelve-pound hod carrier up at your
house. You've got none O. the best of me
had new arrival myself this morning and
he weighs just fourteen pounds.
"Bingety- bangety-bang! went the IA guns
of those two men. and when 1t was all
over 1 saw the man I'd been walking with
sitting down on the pavement and feellns
of a hole in the back Of his head. The
other man was being taken away for burial.
What was the matter?' l asked the
man I'd been walking with, when saw
him in the hospital couple of days later
after the doctord plugged up the nobes III
him.
81 don't let no man brag over me-! said
Went out driving one afternoon with a
man in blackboard. We got out IN the
country a ways and came up to a man
standing in the road.
".Howdy, Ill., said the man 1 was driv-
ing with to the man standing in tile road.
WHAT do you think of this hoss that
s'Bim-bim-bang! went their barkers. and
I crawled over the back of the seat. Went
on all tours to the shrubbery alongside the
road and waited for the last trumpet to
sound.
"The man I'd been driving with was feel
ing where his left ear ought to nave peen
when 1 finally looked I'D Otherwise he
wasn't damaged. The other man had both
of his arms shattered at the elbows, and he
was walking down the road.
u1Uu nOllCt liidl Sou wv iioo oily
thing to shoot about said to the man I'd
been driving with. What happened?
"'well, y'see,' he said, Hi, he sold me
that boss for few dollars, the boss being
a cripple at the time, and 1 took a-hold of
the animal doctored him up, and made a
good I'm and sound 'un of him. HI, he
DIDN'T like me a-cacklin' over him, 1 reckon.
when I asked him what he thought of the
hoss and when 1 seen he was a-going to
draw, 1 was right in line myself, and so we
had 1t
Yes, Stree" continued the talkative man,
cit doesn't take anything at all to get them
to blazing away at each other down that
way, and I wouldn't care to
How long did you say you were down in
Arizona?" asked one of the men the talk
alive man was addressing.
Huh? Arizora?" said the laxative man.
in a mystified kind of way. "Who said
anything about Arizona? 1 was never in
Arizona in my life. It's Kentucky I'm
talking about!'