Tazewell Republican. [volume] (Tazewell, Va.) 1892-1919, 1900-03-01

to luncheon. Mr.. Jobson surveyed the
table approvingiy, as did his old school
chum, who was well-groomed looking
man, who looked as IL he might be TO
stranger to lobsteFs and grilled bones
"well, my dear, you've certainly done
very we'll, considering how little you
expected u.s., said Mr.. Jobson, BEAM
lngly, and then they went at the lunch
sob. by the way, have you any bottled
beer on iceW asked Mr.. Jobson, after
moment.
"No," replied Mrs. Jobson, 1.-THE last
was used on Saturday, and the beer
man hasn't been around yet, but l can
send ~
ooh, never mind, my dear-neyer
mind at ALL" said Mr.. Jobson, amiably.
Sect along bully. without it, cant we,
Swfftboyp Guess we'd be a heap bet
ter off without the stuff, anyhow"
Then Mr.. Jobson, while his friend
was bending over his plate, gave Mrs,
Jobson glance that contained g. world
of meaning.
"swiftboy," said Mr.. Jobson, you'll
have to overlook this hasty affair, but
you know"
Overlook it7" interrupted his friend,
helping himself literally to the salad.
Overlook 1t? 1 guess not. Pm going
to do Just the best know how by 1t.
It's immense-haven't enjoyed things
to eat so much since left home. Mrs.
Jobson.. Il congratulate you upon your
skill In formulating luncheon In a
case of emergency"
Thus the luncheon passed of, and
awhile after 1t. was over the two men
went downtown. There was a steely
glitter in Mr.. Jobson's eye when he
returned home that evening.
- .+Madam," ;he inquired of Mrs. job
son, rs soon as he had taken off his hat,
what do you think this establishment
is-a New York sou brette's fatf"
"Why,a what are you" Mrs. Jobson
started to: answer.
"When l invite a. friend, a substan-
tial business man, up to my home for
luncheon" continued Mr.. Jobson, stern
ly,, "can't you do any better than to re-
gale him and load him up with stun
such as RMiss Tottie Coughdrop sets be-
fore her chorus girl friends when khA
asks them to one a. m. feedT"
"But you brought him so unexpected
ly, and-r7-.'.2'
what kind of stuff do you think
grocery store sliced ham is to set be-
fore one of your husbands guests
Couldn't you have rung In some cold
boiled onions7 What kind of a way Is
It, anyhow, to send a black servant
somersaulting and handspringing out
the alley gate after zinc-inclosed eat
ables when guests are sitting In the par
lor waiting for something whercwith
to appeasetheir hungerP Why couldnt
you have had some nice homemade oys
ter patties, for instance? How about
couple Of fried chickers2 Wouldn't
they have been about 1.-The thing? Dc
you ever cook anything around here
anyhow, except the stuff that you dole
out to me at dinner? Haveyou ever go
anythingzft to eat slowed away In thu
ice box, like other civilized people? DE-
you"
"But to-day Is wash day, and"
at wouldn't make any difference II i
was Decoration day, or Independence
day, or Labor day, or any other old day
you'd have to"kite' that servant out thu
alley, and oh, and by the way, it,
mighty funny what becomes Of all tn
beer-not even a bottle of beer to Civ
the man. I'd like"
"Now, you know that nobody in tn
house touches it but yourself, and"
mighty queer where it goes; mys
terious, to say. the least Whole thini
was the worst frost, the dismales
make-believe for luncheon that eve
saw, and that's no"
"But'Ai Swiftboy said that he reall,
enjoyed it, and he said"
Eyes; I know what he said. Tha
was sarcasm, Mrs; Jobson-plain, every
day sarcasm. -:.Fll bet he said to him
self while. he was getting, off those re
marks that the next time any frien
of his hailed him for a home luncheo
there'd be blue apples on peach trees
And that's what there1l be the mex
time 1 invite friend up here for
bunco luncheon, AIRS. Jobson-just N
member thatl"-Washington Star.