Wauwatosa news. [volume] (Wauwatosa, Wis.) 1900-1948, 1900-12-15

found Uncle Ned and Mss Cadmus pour
ing over a book aud dealing ont hands of
cards. This got to be such a pastime
that Acca and ] could 90 to the theater
without drawing down upon us the wrath
Of Uncle Ned. Indeed, he encouraged
our going. | enioyed the freedom. fool
that | was, anG never dreamed what was
going on walking into the trap prepared
with a serenity that would have made
the tabled fly look like a Solomon by
comparison. Gradually. when the ane,n
lar Miss Cadmus began going ont with
the old gentleman, it dawned upon ne
that she was setting her cap for Uncle
Ned and one of these days we would use
him, and an inheritance.
Now, of course. the mercenary part of
it did not influence me. but it began to
occur to me that it was not right that
poor old Uncle Ned should be shared in
that way. 1t was really wonderful how
L began to realize Uncle Ned's good
qualities. To be sure, he broke ones
chairs and crockery in his temper, and
indeed broke everything but his own
neck, but he was kind in his way. What
that way was | never really made uD
my mind, but | was satisfied it was some
way and-well, | saw we had rather neg
| lected him and we should show him we
loved him as much for himself as for his
money. So one night | said:
Uncle Ned, would you like to play
a few games of cribbagc for little stake
tonightT"
Uncle Ned eyed me for moment.
crossed his legs. set his foot bobbing up
and down carelcssly rs he sent a roll of
bad-smelng smoke to the ceiling and
then decided he would play. Then the
! whole Giabolcal scheme of that Miss
| Catfish came out
Suppose we play whist" she purred.
4
suspccting little wife. and very well"
! said her idiot Of a husband. cayorting in
! to the snare with the guilelcsSncss of
| week old calf. "Acca has only played
! the game twice" | explained to Uncle
| Ned. who simply ground his pipe with
| his teeth and shutfied the cards. Now,
| no one would take Acca for remarka-
| bly-deep woman. She is just simply
| lOvable, cheerful, selfSacrihcng little
| woman, with good deal of common
| sense to cOunterbalanCc my extravaganza
and with intelligence enough to make her
! take an interest in everything that is go-
ing on Everyone who knows her loves
her. Even Uncle Ned, who declared her
a scattcrbrain before we We're married,
grew fonder of her every day until that
Miss God" came.
We played whist. Uncle Ned had so
many trumps that upon my word, |
| thought he was playing with two packs
hard to remember the intricacies of the
game and WINGED at the purring slurs of
Miss Cadmus. AS for me, my long suits
were extracted from me like teeth by
the transformed Uncle Ned, who gloated
with tiendish glee over the torture in
flicted. Finally, when, for the sixth sue
cessive night we had been beaten dis
gracefully and my wife's eyes were filled
with tears at my brutal and thoughtless
comments on her playing, | lost my tenn
per and threw down the cards.
II won't play against such luck, l
growIed How can you expect us to
play against such oddsT
1T is rather scientific" suggested Miss
Cadmus, squirting her eyes at poor Ac-
ca.
Scientific" | snorted, now hot right
through. for Uncle Ned to hold thir
teen trumps and you with enough hon
ors to establish a Napoleonic empire or
receive a returning Dewey! Rats.
And then it was Uncle Ned said what
he said and left me gazing at the
slammed door, hopeless wreck. Then,
too, occurred that scene between my
wife and me, after Miss Cadmus and
her crafty smile had gone off to bed.
Uncle Ned came back. l knew he
play ''Tiddly Winks," Mother Goose
or Jack Straws." He wanted TO in
| quire ii .'Acca had learned the difference
! between an ace and a chicken -iyis' "
| whether we preferred to play dominoes
or build blocks for amusement. Oh, he
| came back! Christmas time approached,
too, but brought with it as little merri
ment for us as uncle had done. Uncle
Ned informed me seriously that he would
advise me TO be divorced from that
Scatterbrain wife of mine" if he did not
think | knew less than she did ! polite
ly told him he could spend his Christ
mas elsewhere, if he wished, for | did
not care TO have my digestion ruined by
his presence-and-wc were all very hap
Ply.
He stopped his remarks about Acca
| then but did not leave. Would YOU be
| lieve IT. he told me he was going to be
married and asked me who | thought
! the lucky woman was. | told him |
hoped. from the bottom Of my heart,
| that it was Miss Cadmus. He only
| chuCkled
! 1t was two days before Christmas. |
| came home tired and discouraged. Lit
! tie Acca put her arms around me and
! was cheering me when | happened to
! look at the piano. BY all that was bor-
| riblc, there was that refined torture of
| modern invention known as duplicate
whist. 1t is called duplicate be-
cause 1t is twice as bad as ordinary
! whist. ] made a rush for it. At that
moment the door opened and Miss Cad
! mus entered with Uncle Ned. The
! boards were i'll my hands ! started to
! throw them i'll the open CRATE. when Ac-
/ cas- voice came to me like Il shock
! Yes. uncle. we were getting ready 10
/ play with you"
Well my brave little niece. we will
! pardon any mistakes your poor scatter
| brain may make | heard him say, ana
! almost crushed the boards in my hands.
| Perhaps Clara will teach you a few
tricks. don't think your husband can
be taught"
How it all happened | do not know.
| but | found myself seated opposite TO
! Aeca taking Il hand from the board.
glared at my wife, but she simply smiled
! back.
Its your lead, chuckle head" my dear
| uncle shouted, and looked at my hand.
! | was delighted 10 find it strong one
! Then | kicked a piece of carving off The
! table at the second thought that Unclp
/ Ned would have the hand next time. |
played small card in my lorg suit ana
D y 10 a,sA I'D Il 1.