The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1900-03-18
TALES TOO BADLY TRUE.
TOLD BIZ COZ. LAMAR FONTaINE, WHO
MAD nor lime TO TRIM IHEN.
A Message to Pemberton mt Nicksburg-
Quick Work with n Gun-The Fish In the
jug Won $4,000 on "a Piece Of sunshine
mn La. Iuxinn- IealnuA Roiiler

Quick Work with n tun-The Fish In the
jug Won $4,000 on "a Piece Of sunshine
Bill, the Loving, Jealous Rather
JACKSON, Miss March l5-THE SIN contained
a story recently in reference TO Lamar Fontaine.
the celebrated improvisatore Of the lowlands
II did not do him entire justice. His abilities
have never gained the recognition they deserve
Ills fame is confined 10 acquaintance and TO news
papers. lie should be internationally known. and
when he IL dead. grateful cOuntrymen ought
To build him a monument, massive and sky reach
ing. The lamen ted Joe Mulhatton, creator oi
the Williams ranch ~aerolite, weight thirty odd
tons, was something Of a genius The fellow
| who, in 1897, had everybody in the United States
rubber necking for airships after dark earned
| some credit. Compared with Fontaine, however,
these two were a. 80 cents to the national debt
They were amateurs, rough and crude. Fon
tame Is a professional, smooth. convincing and
moving lie Is 80 years old and for seventy Of
these eighty years has been practising his art
Starting with good abilities, IL Is but natural
that he has attained almost to superhuman skill.
Many years ago he was 10 blame for absorbing
the credit Of AN Quiet Along the Potomac To-
night" but that time is long past, and beers OF
Philadelphia, son Of the real author, ought not TO
write him any more scathing letters. For At least
two decades Fontaine has believed himself TO be
the author, and he is honest in asserting his title
To the poem. lie can no more be talked out 81 this
delusion than his head can be talked of, and the
man who starts in Ia talk his head of will wind
up with both lungs gone and Fontaine ius, getting
into his swing. 1t IL characteristic of him that
when he has made a statement several times
he believes 1t earnestly. Col Jeems Wins, the
Tall Walnut Of the Yazoo, says Of him: col.
Fontaine dreams a story. tells it at breakfast
and by the time the horn blows for dinner he knows
It IS SO"
Here are some Of the stories, Just az they came
from himself, and he stands ready TO make a sieve
If any man who questions their utter correctness
lie says Of them himself that they are too badly
true, and II he had time he would ornauentthem
When Gen. Grant had Pemherton cOoped up
in Nicksburg it became highly necessary that We
should communicate with him and let him know
that the eyes Of his country was on him and that
We vas cheering ut him, We was 100 miles above
the town aud between us and IL was a he'll mint
Of Yankee gunboats They was tearing up'n
down the river all day an night, chompin' tina
wattah and snortin' like appropriateness |
volunteered for the duty and this how | did done
1t | stuck the letter 10 Pemberton in my shirt
and swum out IN the stream about dark, and
waited for one Of them dlnged gunhoats 10 come
along Them days | could swim for twenty
iour hours and never feel IT, About midnight
one come tearing down As she went by me
! grabbed the gunnel, q foot above the water,
andLung on She was goin' fifteen miles an hour
and my laigs fuateG ON the surface, but It made
no difference. All the way down our boys VAS
shooin' al her from both banks and that made
1t interestin' for me. ono bullet it the hand
by which was holdln' on here Is the scar now
but neyah lost M, hold. We was Jus. ten hours
maxim the run. When we hit tie upper aidge
Of Nicksbug, | swum ashore, handed over my
letter 10 the General went into the wattah ngin.
went through the Yankee fleet and brought up
frdii, "t Congress TssS" for hat, but The records was
burned"
One time | was walking through the woods
10 in the lazou country with my shotgun ON
MY shoulder 1t was 10 o'clock at night and
darker'n the inside Of a COW. Suddenly | heard
else by me the deadly rattle Of a snake knew
that IN another minute ! would be a dead man.
| brought my gun down, fired one barrel in the
direction | supposed the snake TO be, saw him
kwiled by the flash Of the powder and before it
died out killed him with the other barrel I'm
pretty fast with a gun.
"Fishin' in the Iazoo is good sometimes and
bad sometimes, bu, 'hsIs is alSAys catfish
RAIN, the river was bank full and | was usn,
a hand line Suddenly ! felt a sight tug and
began TO draw in. The fish pulled heavy for
my hook to the bank, on the end Of 1t was nothin'
in tho world but a stone Jug about two gallon
size The hook was down in the Jug broke
the thing To- get the hook out and when ! did so
uncovered o gaspergoo that must have weighed
nye pounds That fish got into the Jug when
It was little and staid in until II vas too big 70
yet ont. The mouth Of the jug was upstream
and 1t lived ON such food as drIlted in
I'm a surveyor by trade and | dun't lift my
hat to any man that ever carried a chain Once
| was engaged to survey an enormous body Of
land in Western Texas 1t was an old Spanish
grant and the deed said that a grindstone had
been used to mark one q ihe corners That
was goo years ago Well, got my bearin's
and started out surveyed twenty-S six miles
| north by northeast, thirty-one miles east by south
east, eighteen miles south by southwest, twenty
six miles west By northwest and thirty one miles
north by northwest by north. When ! got to
the end sad TO the ftagman This lsit! Strike
| your pole here lie struck II In hard and il went
through the hole In the centre Of the, grindStone
that was then a foot underground. We dug
a hole 70 set a postln and there was the stone.
After the war | didn't have any too much
money and | went out v est where, IN little while.
th"t this happened Tie town was inst stared
e,sh, saloons and a hotel I had BiiS 1
S Siscs a s d5,9s ,s s.,n w ,@s d dssIIs; ts sTd T i. va. in Snls q
a one ruomed shack, built Of boards set straight
on end Here aud there the sun streamed through
the cracks. 1t was 5 o'clock in the afternoon
IL O'clock the night before, His partner was
SICK. OF been shot, or somethin' The fellow
in the lookout chair was a volunteer and sound
asleep The game was draggln' along with
nobody betun' high and the dealer would swear
now and then and wonder why somebody wasn't
sent 10 relieve him Well, | bought some reds
! aud whites with my Sill and lost EN- in fifteen
minutes was about 10 give up my seat and
get out when a funny thing happened. There
was a knothole IN the side Of the house and the
sun comm through this east a round white re.
Election bout the size Of a dollar, on the aoe, lust
paid il with one white chip T%ietitlie and il won
straight through the deal. ] got up from that
table three hours afterward. with S2,SS, |
s'puSe I'm the only man in the world that ever
Won more'n two thousand on q piece Of sunshine"
"Talkin' bout rattlesnakes, they're not half
feel love. bu, they are capable Of a deep and pure
affection and they have a keen sense Of gratitude.
This is why: left camp one day In Virginia
ant was siroling around when heard = tremen-
RATHER in the grasp Of a king snake. The king
snake held him by the back Of the neck and was
wrapped around him twenty times. slowly crush
ing the life cut Of him The RATHER was a big
shall forget the frenzy 81 despair in his eye !
hated 70 see him murdered in that manner, ~
] killed the king snake and went on, think1n' no
more about IT, Situn' down To- rest after awhile,
i was startled by a rustlin near me and Iookin'
around saw the rattler knew II WAS the same
one by the marks on his neck. He was not kvield,
but came to me In a fawnin' manner and, lnyin'
his head upon my knee, wiRgled his tail a. " he
were a pleased dog, stroked him and his neck
swelled up with gladneSs Climbing up my arm,
he kissed me deliCately on the cheek, then, kwiin'
me back to camp and could do or say nothiu.
tn discourage him when we arrived | showed