Morris tribune., 1899-07-22
KEEPING COMPANY
how the sswidder" Caugh. joe Though
His Parents Were opposed.

|
His Parents Were Opposed.
since so many persons are writing
IN such lots of love stories, true ana
otherwise, we will just try our nano
at that business.
| Now ours, if not a very rohlatlc
story, happens to be a true one'.ah
affair in which we We're not one ol the
principal actors, but sort OF thltu
member in the transaction-a party
of the third part, as legal instrument
might read. Now here is our story
AWAY back in the'60's, during our
va bond days, while in North central
indiana in the employment OF no
chester nursery firm, and canVasslha
that norton of the State, we made our
home for while at the house oI
farmer, and aged widoWer.
The farmer had as housekeeper
widow somewhere between thirty aAu
forty wears of age named Patterson, pu'
called for short, by every one III tnat
settlement, "the Wilder Pat. ohe
came from somewhere down in the
southwestern corner of the Hoosler
State on the lower Wabash, and was
| person of very pleasant disposition
hut one of the homeliest women tnat
we ever saw. In fact, we then thougnt
, that a person could not possibly nave
Seen created much plainer-loeklng
than she.
Well, as the old saying goes, Every
Jack has a JILL c. nsequently the re-
verse must also b. true; and N tnls
case the widder's jack was C, p not
overnight, Joe Hibbard by name, and
some twenty-five years of age, sort
of subsection boss on the P. Fit. W
and C. r. R., which ran about nall a
mile from the house where we were
stopping.
Now Joe's parents wee dead set
against his keeping the widder's com"
pany, and bitterly opposed to his ever
marrying her, consequently they die
| all they could to break up the Woo1ng
and had succeeded at the time when
we first came there, thus giving the
woman oceans of trouble.
But when a lone wilder just makes
up her mind
To be welded again, and she really
does try
To catch some poor devil, he surely
will find
That she's like the spider, and he's
like the fly.
One day she came to us, and tear
fully and confidentially stated her love
affairs and deliberations, and diftident-
ly asked us if we would kindly helr
her out in the matter by just acting
as her escort and company for little
While-long enough to create Jealous
feelings in her fellows mind; and per-
haps that might fetch him back to he1
loving, if not lovely presence. About
those days we were ready for anything
for a novelty, anything for fun and ex-
element; so we, taking pity on he1
forlorn condition, accepted her propos-
al, and from that time we were her
"stiddy comp'ny," taking her to serv-
ice at the little tumble-down Methodist
church on Sundays, and also to several
backwoods social evening gatherings;
but whether Joe ever became jealous
or not we never heard, as he never
showed up at the house nor in places
where his dulcinea and we were to-
gether.
The affair went ON in this way for
some time, until it got noised around
as fact in the whole settlement-so
it came to our hearing that
young tree peddler from Illinoy is a
goin' to hitch onto the Wilder Pat. "
(By the way, we were then citizen
of the Sucker State, having voted fol-
Dick Oglesby for governor, and per
formed other services, either beneficial
or otherwise, for that commonwealth
Thunderation! the very idea of our
ever being hubby to the homel1est Wo-
man in the whole State of Indiana, and
she nearly old enough to be our OWL
mother to bootG We had "orful pheel-
inks" whenever we thought about it
Now, could it possibly be that that
'desiging female" was playing deep
double game all this time-keeping one
of those lovely wall-eyes on us with
marriage purpose intent while preteno-
ing to be looking after Joe with the
other? If So we had better be getting
out of that scrape asSsoon as possible,
Well, things still went on as usual,
and while folks keep talking away we
did some tall thinking, till one even
ing, shortly after, when on coming
home whom should we see on the set
tee by the fireplace but Joe and the
wilder, his arm around her waist, and
her face weather in smiles. Hurrah!
we could just then have yelled like q
wild Injun. and jumped up high en-
ough to have hit the ceiling-if there
had been any and cracked our heels
together for JOY. But we didn't; WE
just treated him coolly as we could
during the rest Of the evening, and
acted as snappish as possible, so as to
make him think he had cut US cut in
the widder's affections, and had made
big bargain of it; but all the time
we were in fear lest the cuss would
clear out and leave her again, and she
should try her most persuasive ways to
induce us 10 repeat the farce. But
next morning our fears soon vanished
when we knew by her smiling phiz
that she had fairly hooked the gudge-
on, and that same evening she had him
neatly landed, they having been mar
ried then at friends house by an
itinerant preacher, in spite Of the op-
position OF Pater and Mater Hubbard
The loving couple had no cards, no
cake, no nothing, but just wedding,
and that was all.
And we? Well, we didn't weep
much hl1t presented the hannv hrido