Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1899-06-24
Mr.. JoBsoNIIoN WHEELING

Last year. about this time, Mr.. Jobson
was sitting on his front steps, when a par
ty' OF bicycais$. men and women, sailed by.
These bicycle people weary me-" said
Mr.. Jobson to Mrs. Jobson. They look
like maraonettes. They don't look sensible.
man that rides a bicycle always looks
like a popinjay to me. He looks as II
there's something lacking in his makeup.
AS for the women bbcychsts. they're just
frights and holy shows, that's all. Its
not the real ching for a woman 10 ride a
bike. It's not wofnanly. I can't under
stand whats got into fellows that know
men otherwise POSSESSED Of ordinary COM
mon sense-n letting their wives ride
Wheels
Mrs. Jobson didn't say anything. She
mad been wanting to ride a bicycle for a
long time. but she knew that the way to
get one wasn't to express her desire to MIR.
Jobson.
A couple of months ago Mr. Jobson's
brother rode up to Mr.. Jobson's house on
a wheel. Ut was just about the hour of
cleaning.
MT. Jobson to his brother, referring to the
bicycle suit.
Sure" said Mr. Jobson's brother. but
In In not a ham. 1 bet you couldn't learn to
ride wheel in year"
This aroused MIR. Jobsons sporting blood.
TN bet you can ride one the first rattle
out OF tine box, said he IN tone of chaa-
velocipede when you were in dresses, and
I've toted you around in front of the ma
chine at that"
That 500" said Mr. Jobsons brother
We'll. you're about 112 years older now,
and TN bet you'd fall off that machine of
mine before you got two feet.
Would, hey?" said Mr.. Jobson, rising.
We'll. you just give me lift on 1t, and
I'M show you thing or two"
MIR. Jobson's brother winked to Mrs. Job
son, and then he walked down to the curb
to help Mr. Jobson on to the bicycle Mr.
Jobson got on all right, and then he just
pumped the pedals like a man who had
been riding wheel from his infancy and
disappeared into the dark His brother
was considerably startled and he hoped
on the wheel of friend next door to the
Jobsons and followed after MIR. Jobson. He
caught the latter, going easy, couple of
squares away, ana the two rode around for
couple of miles, when they returned to
MIR. JobSons abode.
(Which. might say" remarked Mr. job
son, Initiating his chest when he got off the
you think l am
Thus the virus got into his veins. There
was something on his mind when he got
home from the office the next afternoon,
and Mrs. Jobson saw it.
Mrs. Jobson," he remarked at the din
ner table, Il want to tell you that your
determined efforts to convert me into an
old fossil have failed and petered out dis
L
going to be factor around this house
myself hereafter"
why, what is the matter now?" inquired
Mrs. Jobson
Nothing the matter said Mr. Jobson
| Except that I'm getting tired of having
everything that want frowned upon. I've
been hankering to get a bike and ride it
Tor the past couple of years and you have
maintained an attitude of steady opposi-
| ton to the idea. You mayn't have said
| anything, but you've looked it. Likewise,
I've been on the point a dozen times of
suggesting that you get a wheel and ride
| it, but I've been held down by your mar
row notions on these subjects. Now. that
| all off. I'm going to get wheel myself to-
| morrow, and, whats more, I'm going to get
one for you ssOther mems wives learn to
ride wheels. III for nothing else than to
please their husbands and you're going to
do the same. 01'm not ready to settle down
yet to the kind of dry -as-dust existence
| you want me TO lead. There'H be two bicy-
| cles in the basement hall tomorrow even
ing. One of them'n be mine and the
| other'n be yours. There's riding acad-
| envy around the corner, and / just suggest
it to you mildly that it'll be a good thing
all around if you fall in with my little idea
in this matter. for once, and learn to ride
| that machine ''
| Whereupon Mrs Jobson went upstairs
and smiled mIerrily at her reflection in the
| mirror, and likewise Rugged herself num-
Der of tines She ehad been taking little
| sprints on her sister wheel for number
| of months and she tust dotted on wheeling.
| She was properly clumsy and fearsome,
| while taking her first few lessons under Mr..
Jobsons eye but she mastered the
| art of riding and she and Mr.. Jobson took
| long rides. together every evening until
| Tuesday last Then Mr.. Jobson, riding his
| bicycle home from his Office ran into a
| coal cart. He scraped most of the hide off
| the left side of his face, and his wheel was
| junk when it was rescued from beneath the
| cart wheels. Otherwise he was unhurt.
| But he was deadly calm until the dinner
| was halfway over. when he looked Mrs.
| Jobson steadily in the eye, across the table,
| and said:
| you've Won out again, haven't your"
| How do you mean, dear?' asked Mrs.
| Jobson.
ooh, nothing said he, Except that
| you're a whole lot crafter than l ever gave
you credit for being. You probably had it
| all figured out in advance, when took out
| that life insurance policy. and when, about
| the same time, you cajoed and bamboozled
| me. against my will. into getting bicycle,
| underneath the wheels of a coal cart. l
| car see 1t now, as plain as day. But it's all
| off Mrs. Jobson! I'll just thwart that end
| of your little scheme by giving up bicycling
| forever. I'll just render it necessary for
| you to hit me on the head with an AK as
| sleep, in order to get that insurance
! money! You are privileged to spin around
4 like a bowling dervish on a wheel as much
| as you like, henceforth and forever-seeing
| that you were successful in breaking down
| me into permitting it-but, as for me, Mrs.
| Jobson my eyes have been opened. If you
| think you can get rid of me by putting ar
| senic ir my coffee, or working some dodge
like that go ahead but the next time you
bulldoze me into riding bicycle just you
| send me special delivery letter announc-
| ing that fact, that's ALL!
| ~