The times., 1899-11-26

Hold up your head, roarcd the in
1uriated little fellow Hold up your head,
O'Brien- As jerry paid not the slightest
attention. he took the weapon be was hold
ing. and with in prodded the giants upper
extreme until the nose was altogether be-
l0ud my range OF vision. The operation
must have been painful. and ! looked to
see trouble then and there. But I was
wrong. The private merely brought his
hand TO the salute and gained permission TO
speak Then. mildly and in his rich
brogue. he queried, Corporal, am OF to
how'd me head this way fur the rist OF me
loif2'
.Assuredly. was The reply.
Fur the risJ Of me loif?' persisted
o-Bren
Yes beloved the officer. Why?
Well was the answer. if o. must OF
must But it's goodbye Oi1l be a-sayin' to
ycz, corporal dairlin', FUR Oill niver sac
s-ez agin-niYer,'
And thar" laughed Mr.. Fulton, is why
J stooD."
And, speaking Of Arizona. reminds one OF
a yarn told here last season by Harry Sa
Van. who is booked for this week at the
Grand The acrobat. as 40 most acrobats.
served his apprenticeship with a wander
ing circus and the narrative to be repeated
strOlling through the Dakotas.
IN Larimore the young performer became
acquainted with Frenchman who had ar
rived there on the preceding day. The
foreigner was all but dead with cOuSump-
lion and at the advice of an American
physician, he had made for the West in
rapid time. He was a well-educated fell
low who had an excellent school knowl-
edge Of English and Mr.. Sa Van easily
persuaded him to put in a month with
The show The Two learned to like each
other greatly and spent many hours in
company.
It was on the train out of Larimore. how
ever. that the visitor. whose name was An
tojne Achard grew interested in a couple
cf Indians on board. Both were carefully
dressed. evidently having come from one
OF the Eastern colleges. NJ. AChard, never
wholly practical watched them closely.
even listening 10 their conversation at the
expense Of that of his friend. Mr. Sa Van
soon grew tired of this and took to look
ing out OF the window. An hour
elapsed and the red men went into the
smoker. The acrobat turned and observed
that his companion was in deep thought.
Well" he said. ehafingly. "those chaps
seemed to be Of considerable Importance in
your eyes
NJ. Achard leaned back with an awaken
ing sigh. His lips were parted and MS de-
light was apparent 'ImpoT-T-rtOngt" ne
remarked. Mon dieu Impor-r-rtong. ]
should zay, Sink ov eet! Ze or-r-riginaI
uWnairs Of zis great continong, Sush nous
and sush faces and sush eyes-sush enthu-
iasteek eyes, Zay wair talking zair own
IangWidge, And sush a iangWidgei So
musicali / haf nefair heard anything like
eeti And ze enthusiasm in zair eyesi Zay
mus haf bean plotting ze recapture OF
zair lan'. And zay spOl1e-ah. gay spoke
In Wor-r-rds so r-r-rOund and quaint and
Iuu oy meaning, Sush a beautiful musi-
cal langwidgei Was eet-w'at you call?-
WAS eet Cherokee or-or ChOptaW|'
Mr.. sa Van laughed. Neither - he said
u was hog Latin!"
And anyone who remembers the harsh
grating jargon Of the schooIb0y viii need
no further explanation Of the joke
The telegraph keys lost a very rapid op-
crater when George Boniface, jr., decided
tc adopt the profession OF his family anC
went upon the stage. The decision was
reached with great suddenness. according
so the man ahead" OF Dear Old Charley
and the issue, so to speak, was a forceC
one.
Mir. Boniface had just graduated from ar
electric school in Chicago and had beer
rendered q position at q small station OF
the Union Pacific Railroad. I'm cOmpan!
nate he had Travelled as far as Omaha and
was seated in the dining room OF the OLE
Planters Hotel, when their table was oc
plHied by an arrival OF a rather undesira
bic description. This newcomer was
lypical ''rube' OF the most laugnable sort
Tie was long and thin, wore a very bob
tailed coat and baggy trousers, ueede
shaving and had carried into the place
vaIise Of antiquated pattern. The lads
l. ea9- asal
nonsense. stifed their laughter with din
Guilty. and falling back upon a trick @
the college. began telegraphing each othe
regarding the third party.
Catch on 10 the guy, raped Mr. Boni
face with his knife. The words may no
be IDENTICAL. but they are an excellen
translation of the slang OF the period.
.-Ra-tat-ta-tat b" replied his vis-a-vis
Have you noted those zizzers al the sid
OF his face2'
And that satchel came the reply.
More like a chest" signaled the chum
.tIIl bet that Noah's elephant got
I'd the Ark on the claim that it was hi
trunk. tapped the comedian.
This joke probably was new then an
both laughed. The stranger did lot TAX
tis gaze from his plate.
Hes trying 10 see if he can find Hong
kong IN that china" the knife Of the otht
lad conveyed.
More likely he wonders If he can g,
turkey IN china" was returned.
"OhserYe that tie
Like a section OF a pillory-"
sharp eyes
He'd look daggers if ne knew what "
were saying
Hes a queer bird raped Mr.. Bon
face i wonder who he is.
The other member Of the trio was hold
ing his fork in the air in the most country
fed fashion Suddenly il descended Bot
lads thought that the man was trying
Initiate them. Then they discovered thi
the stranger slowly was telegraphing 3
answer 10 their question. u was iu
about 10 introduce myself. said the for
quietly; Il am the chief operator Of u
road You two facetiOus runts are dI
charged
There was no room for explanations. II
Baniface returned 80 Chicago the next ia
year later he made his professional d
but.
COMING EVENTS.