Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1899-01-04
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Mondeau--Does he write for money,
Bonvean-Yes, but his pa doesn't ra
spond. --Up-toDa
Qulpps-"You should see the girl I'm
going to marry-she's a Bird Pbnns
d heard she was a high fyers-
Town Topics.
Papa" said little Johnny, "they're
not in it y What are not In it, my
boy?' "Why, the other twenty four
letters of the alphabet
Author-I always test my poems by
reading them TO my wife. Frend-Ah
yes-and you use those she likes? An.
thor-No; those she doesn't.-Tit-Bits.
He-Do you know when you get A
bad coin? She-Why, certainly do
He-How do you know? She-Why,
the man 1 offer it to refuses to take II.
Wife Ito her husband)-I say, nv
dear, how badly the tailor has put this
button on your walstcoat. THIS Is tho
fifth time l have had to sew IL on
again.
"Those folks next door must have
bought that house." "What makes you
think so?" Il heard her scolding the
maid for driving picture nail into the
plaster
Trivvet-What makes you call Miss
Tenspot new woman? l haven't no.
ticed anything forward about her.
hor na op4s
the minute.
at is remarkable that one rooster
can do all that growing Il think the
little rooster is helping him." "oh.
yes; an auxiliary crew, sir. '-Cleyeland
Plain Dealer.
Papa-Well, did the photographer
succeed in making the baby look pleas
ant? Mamma-No; the baby succeeded
In making the photographer look I'M
pleasant.-Puck.
Percy-Bradford uses a lot of per.
fume. Doesn't he know that 1t is bad
form? "Well, It's a sort of family pride.
You know he comes of old colognlal
stock. The Widow.
"Now, Bennie, here's the medicine.
and here's the dime papa left TO pay
you for taking It," "All right, mamma.
If you take 1t and don't tell, I'll give
you half. "-Harper's Bazaar.
De Witte-Queer about Welsh rare
bit. The acting cook--What is queer?
De Witte-The girl who makes it al.
ways says 1t isn't nearly so good as the
one she made the other night.-Puck.
1t was Mr.. Justice Maule who said,
in answer to a witness who declared
that he had been welded to the truth
from infancy: Eyes, sir; but the ques.
ton is--how long have you been Wild
ower?'
Minnie-What frauds these beggars
are. l met 'blind" man, who said,
lady" Mamle-Yes, he said that to
make you think he really was blind
indianapolis Journal.
Mrs. Upjohn-Our minister is high.
every word In the dictionary. Mrs..
/ Downright = That's nothing. Our
preacher uses lots of words that amt
In the dictionary at all.-Chlcago Trib-
une.
ut Is very nice In your wife to buy
cigars for you," remarked one man.
| Yes" replied the other, after some
consideration, otis a delicate and con-
slderate way of keeping me from spoil
ing her lace curtains with tobacco
smoke"
Three different walters at an hotel
asked prim, precise little man at din
ner If he would have soup. A little an
noyed, he said to the last walter who
asked the question, us 1t compulsory!
mo, SIR" said the waiter; II think its
| mock turtle"
Young man." said the young wom-
ans father, you have boosted several
times that you possess an honored
name." "Yes, sir" replied the foreign
sutton, haughtily. "Well, may inquire
what bank 1t will be honored at and
FOR how much?"
MIS- OuQueuIlCu-n udt aNi 49,
,po u them are! Dealer-Yes, madam;
they are our very latest designs. Mrs
s.-Are they to eat fruit with? Dealer
They are souvenir spoons, madam
Mrs. S.-Gimme n dozon. Our ne"
French cook makes elegant souvenir
Mlstress-Why, Bridget, you surrey
don't consider those windows washeo'
Brldget-Sure, I washed 'em nicely on
the inside, mum, SO We can look QUIZ
but l Intentionally lift thin Illus
dirty on the outside so thin aignorau'
Jones children mkt door couldn't looA
ln.-Truth.
"a man has to keep his eyes open ="
be a politician nowadays remarAe.
one statesman. Possibly that Is coffee'
as general principle" replied the o'n.
er, "but IL you had looked arouhu =.
your colleagues while you were mah'ns
that last speech Of yours you Wo"'
have had your doubts"
| "I,va done nv best" said the indlai'