New-York tribune., 1899-12-30
TIE TALK OF TIE DAY.

Tho Worcester Spy" says ut turns out that
the Right Rev j. Mecrschaert. Bishop OF the
Indian tribes ~ the West. who visited Holy cross
College I'm Worcester on Tuesday December o. ana
was received with open arms by the uhsuspecuns
,nornbers Of the faculty and students. was not
Blshop Mecrschaert At all. II is pretty certain
that he was none other than clever and ex-
nerlenccd confidence man named Lewis. The man
has operated. u Is raid. all over the country hut
usually he enacts the part Of n plain priest ana
not that OF Bishop"
no" he said. thoughtfully; mo polysamy for
well | should ray not" she. retorted I
wouldn't leave n hair in your head ,,,.,
Very likely" he replied but ! wasn't thinking
Of that. | thinking of wedding annl,ersaracs o
Poor Roberts! lie has three year Ara suppose
W. Wei she said. nterrogatIvely.
Suppose one OF these polygamists sh0ul9
thoughtlcssly marry at such intervals that he had
n silver wedding. "A china Wedding ana n crystaI
wedding All I'm the same year And suppose no
should thouRhtlessy choose his wedding days so
that the anniversaries al came IN the same VIZ tT;
tlc same month; End then & supp0se same 5hne
the birthdays hnTpened aPns loo and when
he got older the grandchildrens. NO; no poygamy
for me! ThTH OF ,be hoday S season. Oh don't
envy Roberts the Sultan OF sulu little BILL -
Chicago Post.
DR. J. w Madara an Army surgeon on the island
OF Jolo writes home to Kansas as follows; MY
Chino-Tagalo girl that am treating Tor paralysis
OF both lower limbs is now up and walking on
crutchcs She had not been oIt OF bed for nine
months was called this morning to sec little
babe one month old that Is very i'll with bowel
trouble His mother Is sixteen years old, and IL
feeding the baby condensed milk out or bottle.
What would you give for It's chance In this tropical
climate? The people are devout Catholics ana
were praying for the baby when | arrived The
people OF tho United States do not know what
superstition is I gave the baby little castor oil
and paregoric and wished for some spced syrup
OF rhubarb but as Uncle Sam is not In the baby
business directly we do not have any on hand.
We expect the ice machine in two weeks. Oh. my!
Think OF cold drink!
BALLAD OF VEGETABLES
Captaln Joseph Meehan OF Germantown, brother
OF tho venerable Councilman Thomas Meehan,
combines agricultural pursuits with tie MUSES.. as
the following contribution proves:
A potato went out on a mash
That's pie Tor mel" observed the squash.
And all the beets turned red.
GO 'wayl" the onion. weeping, cried;
"Your love cannot be;
You canteloupe with me-.
But onward still the tuber came.
And lay down at her feet;
"You caunower by any name
And II will smell wheat;
And I. too. am an early rose
And you I've come to SEQ;
So don't turnip your lovely nose.
But spinachat with me-
81 do not carrot all to wed,
So go. sir. II you please!
The modest onion mcekly said,
And lettuce. pray, have peas!
Go think that you have never seen
Myself or smelled my sigh;
Too long maiden have been
| For favors in your rye!"
"Ah spare n cussi" the tuber prayed;
"My cherryshed bride you'll be;
You are the only weeping maid
That's currant now with me!'
And as the willy tuber spoke
| He caught her by surprise.
And, giving her an artichoke,
Deyoured her with his eyes.
| philadelphia Record.
All the Hohenzollern princes born since l722 have
| silent in a curious old cradle OF carved oak. On
! the four sides Is carved the text: He hath given
His angels charge over thee. to keep thee In all
| His ways" The Emperor regards this old heir
| loom somewhat in the light OF luck" OF the
| Hohenzollern race, and all his children have one
| after the other been Graded In 1t.
| His Line of Criticsm.-'I understand" said the
| neiehbor that your husband Is dramatic
| NO" replied the little woman, bitterly; he II
| even worse than that he is household CRITIC
lchicego Post