Saint Mary's beacon., 1899-10-05
Saint Yar!1s Beacon
4 NAN WITH TINE IRON VIC.

A presentiment was responsible
for the iron wig. A distant Tela.
tive Of Mr. Job Teeter's, while
walking barsheaded in his garden,
one day, was killed By 9 ballet that
fell noiselessly out the air from q
great height and penetrated his
Uranium. A marked copy Of the
local paper, containing . full ac-
count Of the accident, was mailed
TO Mr.. Teeter ; and thereafter that
gentleman had no piece Of mind,
either day or night. He was seized
BY the conviction that the same
manner Of death would befall him
also. and the presentimeut got such
hold upon him that he dreamed oi
it by night, and never went abroad
without the dread Of il aching in
his bones. IL be heard q gun "a
OF, when be was out Of doors, be
shivered With apprehension until
sufficient time had elapsed for tbs
ballet to fall to the earth again, 10
case the gun had been fred in the
air. He read all that he could iind
upon the subject Of the momentum
Of falling bodies, and only had his
fears confirmed BY the assurance
that half-ounce bullet falling from
Q height of one.hundred yards,
would gain such velocity as to kill
q man az surely as il fired at him
point blank from the same distance.
Tbs result of these accumulating
fears was that Mr. Teeter decided
to armor-plate his defenceless bald
head. So he had made for himself
an iron plate exactly fitting his
dome Of thought; and to this he
firmly glued 9 conventional wig.
The contrivance was q great sue
cess, for, when its broad spring
clamps pressed firmly in the flesh
behind Mr.. Teeter's ears-the
clamps themselves being concealed
by the luxuriank brown curla of the
wig-no rude shock could part him
and his cap Of mail. Such . sweet
sense Of security possessed him,
when he went abroad with his iron
wig upon his head And, further
more, the brown curls were so re-
juvenating, so becoming With
infinite satisfaction Mr.. Teeter
viewed himself daily in the mirror,
and became. more and more of the
mind that, though . bachelor OF
-llftY-five, he was not too old to win,
even jet, the heart Of some fair
creature who would make life par
adise for him.
Safe now from the haunting
dread of extinction by falling bul-
lets. Mr. Teeter's step grew once
more firm and jsuntY the color re-
turned to his pendant cheeks, and
his eyes shown with animation and
hope. When the town. in June,
began to be deserted for the sea-
shore and the mountains, Mr..
Teeter, mindful Of many we'll
founded quibs upon the scarcity of
men at summer resorts, determined
to 60 where his sex would be taken
at his full valuation. So he pack
ed fat grip and started for one of
the most popular caravansaries by
the side of the sounding sea.
Here life at once took on a new
and magical color for him. He
learned. for the first time, what
it means to bask in the melting
glances Of youth and beauty. In
his younger days, Mr.. Teeter had
been too shy to venture much into
feminine sociesy; but now, in his
more seasoned and confident prime,
with the ambrosial curls of the iron
wig hiding his polished plate, he
felt equal to any amount Of firta-
tion and love-making. With all
the hunger Of q soul starving for
romance, he threw himself into the
gayaties of eeashore life, capering
among his quota Of fair ones (which
vas necessarily large) in as spright-
ly manner as any other of the 4
men who represented the sterner
sex ct the Seafoam Pavilion.
e.