davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

/ LEfOm the ALCn1SOn GlODe.l
| Fishing stories are white lies.
A woman's meanness never fully de-
4 velops until she marries.
| A sixteen year old girl is pretty, but
never as pretty as she thinks she is.
The kissing bug must be a girl-bug
! all who claim to have been kissed are
men.
tells something he has always kept a
| secret.
Refuse to take q drink with a drunk
ard, and he will congratulate you on
having good sense.
An AtchisOn woman hates the men
SO heartily that she always looks
sIouchy, so they win not admire her.
There are stin some old fashioned
people who believe that a man has to
be horny handed in order to be honest.
The most fortunate man in the world
lives in AtchisOn: he IS an old bache-
Tor, and has no kin strings tied to him.
After a woman has been married two
years, she should give up trying to get
her husband to say voluntarily that he
is fond of her.
well, I'll tell you all about it," a
man said to a friend today. mo you
won't" the friend replied; Il haven't
time to listen"
We have noticed that a girl stops
making fun of a young mans writing
at about the same time that she quits
showing his letters.
A woman's great consolation at a
funeral is the presence of former old
servants in the family who have come
some distance to attend.
The women give prizes for every
thing: why not give a prize to the
guest who can eat corn on the ear
most gracefully? A prize to the guest
who can say she has had a nice time in
an original way, would also be encour-
aging.
A wading party was given in honor
OF Miss Daysey Mayme Appleton yes
terday, who is to be married shortly to
the Honorable L. Chauncey o. Bryanne.
A large number of girls were invited
in order that they might see some of
Miss Daysey Mayme's wedding under
wear as the girl who gave the party
had guaranteed that Miss Appleton
would wear some of her wedding lin
gerie- There was great excitement and
pleasure in Wading in the same pond
with underwear trimmed in lace cost
ing several dollars an inch, and made
in China, and the party was a great
success. Other wading parties will be
given for the coming bride in the hope
that the girls will get to see all her
pieces
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

they were during the first few weeks OF
the month. The heaviest days receipts
which have SO far been recorded Is
$22,OOO Yesterday the amount received
from this source was only 81, 200. The
day before it was 81 O00
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28
Pittsburg, Pa, and Return $25.4C
Via the Santa Fe Route.

Tickets on sale July 31st and August
1st good until Aug. 31st. See T. L.
King, agent for particulars.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

The Filipinos appear to be improvlng
in their craftsmanship In the nshI d
Calamba yesterday four Americans
were killed and y wounded while three
dead insurgents were all that could be
counted.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

Now that Mr. Mckinley has taken
Root he may be able to remain III
Washington another four years
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

DR.. c. A. Mcguire who has been con
fined to the house for several days IS
improving.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

Alice, daughter of Frank G. Willard,
in falling from a tree broke one arm
and sprained a wrist of the other arm.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

We can please you in the new books.
Chas Bennett, books and stationery,
$50 Kansas avenue.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28
snecial Excursion.

To Wathena Chautauqua Sunday, July
3Oth. 1899 via the Rock Island Route.
Leave Topeka $50 a. M. returning at
sos D. M Only SIPS for the round trip.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.
[From the Chicago News.1
/ man at q may be a fool at 40.

[From the Chicago News.1
a man at p may be a fool at 40.
An idle rumor is nearly always a
falsehood.
Loafng is the music of labor without
the sound.
It's much easier to run up a hill than
it is to foot It.
Even the successful dentist encoun-
ters a snag occasionally.
The original sin of a joke doubtless
lies in the stealing thereof.
No man on earth is wise enough to
be trusted with unlimited power.
The wallpaper trust means a frieze-
out for the small manufacturers.
Some men who have more money
than brains are on the verge of bank
ruptcy.
A fool knows other. peoples business
better than a wise man knows his own.
Some of the modern society novels
were evidently written with a decol-
lete pen.
A girl may be an expert at handling
curling tongs and yet know absolutely
nothing of draw poker.
When a man has a clear field it means
there is nothing else in it. When he has
a clear head-well, that's different.
The truly great politician is one who
is able to perform a clear public duty
and by the same act crafty a grudge
against political enemy.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

Ten thousands demons gnawing away
at ones vitals couldn't be much worse
than the tortures of itching piles. Yet
there's a cure. Doan's Ointment never
fails.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

We mend and sew on buttons free.
American Steam Laundry. Tele. BAL
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

TIeinz's Ice Cream is the best. Phone
397-212 East Eighth street.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

A woman's great consolation at a
funeral is the presence of former old
servants in the family who have come
some distance to attend
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28
GLoBE SIGHTS

TFrom the Atchison Globe.1
Fishing stories are white lies.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

It is curious that the same woman
who is content to be in love with one
man is more than content to have a lot
Of men in love with her.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

The women give prizes for every
thing; why not give a prize to the
guest who can eat corn on the ear
most gracefully? A prize to the guest
who can say she has had a nice time in
an original way, would also be encour-
aging.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

A man can do most anything and still
be a good husband if he only remem-
bers to kiss his wife and toss the baby
every time he comes home.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

Special train to FIT. Scott Aug 1st via
Mo. Pac Round trip $500.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR
[From the New York Press.1
Matrimony spells martyrdom.

The most unsatisfactory thing to wo-
men is that they can show some of
their prettiest clothes only when they're
off
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

A woman's meanness never fully de-
velops until she marries.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

We have noticed that a girl stops
making fun of a young mans writing
at about the same time that she quits
showing his letters
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

Every one reaches a day when he
tells something he has always kept
secret
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

A sixteen year old girl is pretty, but
never as pretty as she thinks she is.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

The kissing bug must be a girl bug:
all who claim to have been kissed are
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

Two women in whom the same man
is interested may never be able to de-
eide how much they like him, but they
don't have any trouble deciding how
much theY don't Ike each other
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

Refuse to take q drink with a drunk
ard, and he will congratulate you on
having good sense.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-07-28

well, III tell you all about it, a
man said to friend today mo you
won't" the friend replied; Il haven't
time to listen"
The Coconino sun., 1899-01-07

People who denounce the stage should remember that the minstrel Is never 80 black as he k painted.
The Coconino sun., 1899-01-07

Ladies calling cards, in the correct styles, printed in the latest copper.plate script at this office.
The Coconino sun., 1899-01-07
PUBLIC OPINION
 5000 Papers in 1


 You can feel the great pulse of the United States by reading Public Opin ion, which quotes opinions from Allan tic to Pacific on all important ques- tions. In no other way can you become familiar with the sentiment of every state and with the opinions of every faction in every state. President Mckinley, Senator Allison, Senator Hanna, Hon. Wm. J. Bryan, The Gov ernor of Canada, and the Spanish Le- gation at Washington are among the recent subscribers for Public Opin- ion. They want it because it gives the public opinion of the United States. Doubtless you will conclude to send us ? cents for 3 months subscrip- tion. Paper will be stopped at expira- tion of this time. Regular subscrip- tion price, $2.5) per year. Sample copies free. Address PUBLIC OPINION New York. N. Y.
The Coconino sun., 1899-01-07
Reduced Rates to Phoenix.

Commencing Wednesday, Dec. !, 1898, and continuing up to and includ- ing April 26, 1899, the Santa Fc Pacific Railroad company will sell round trip tickets from Flagstaff to Phoenix at the rate of 5000. These tickets will only be sold Wednesday of each week during period mentioned above and will be limited to continuous passage in each direction, with final limit of thirty days from date of sale.
 GEO. E. SULLIVAN, Agent.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-06-17

them virtually immune against the
most merry conceited jests. Il
the treatment becomes popular GO may
lead To the development 90 new spe-
c.alJy. for which We venture Co pro-
pose the name % 's.iototherapy.' \
properly trained acknowledgements,
would see at a glance the indications
of a particular case. and would never.
for instance. administer full-Hayored
Limerick 20 an archbishop or q Nbc
at female frailty % q new woman. lie
would also be careful tn adjusting the
dose. and would frequently have. like
Oliver Wendell Holmes. 90 avoid be
ing rs funny as he could The laugh
ter treatment. we are told 10y Dr. Aiu-
tolO. Is contraindicated TN cases OF
pleurisy. heart disease. and pcritoni-
It's. and also in the case ~ nsurotic
children. We would add that "a would
be well to use IL with caution tn the
case OF elderly gentlemen afflicted with
govt. and strong-minded ladies with n
mission
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-06-17
HE LhUGaTGR CUkt
AN ITALIAN PHYSICIAN

That laughter is popularity believed
to be beneficial Is evidenced by the Old
proverb, Laugh and grow fat" Bu
merriment may cure many other things
besides leanness. 50 we are told by DR..
D'AiutoIo. an Italian physician. who
has just seriously discussed the action
of laughter as an expectorant, in a pa
per before the Medico-Chirurgical Soci-
ETY. Of Bologna. The general subject
is reviewed in a brief notice in The
British Medical Journal as follows:
Therapeutic effects of different
kinds have been attributed TO laughter
by the gravest medical writers from
Hippocrates downward. The Father Of
Medicine laid special stress on the i'm
portance of merriment at meals. The
old physicians recommended laughter
as a powerful means OF 'desopilating'
the spleen. FonsSagrives said that
mirth is the most powerful lever of
health Tissot processes TO have cured
scrofulous children by tickling and
making them laugh. DumOnt de Mon
teauX relates the strange case of a
gentleman who got rid of an intermit-
tent fever after witnessing a perform
ance of lie Marriage de Figaro at
which he had laughed consumedly.
Other learned doctors state that ne
phritic collie. scurvy. pleurisy. and 9th
er affections are favorably influenced
by laughter
OF DR.. D'Aiutolo's special treatment
the writer goes on TO say:
He used this treatment in five cases
of bronchitis and other affections in
which there was a morbid product in
the bronchial tubes and alveoli.' \
good laugh. by shaking the chest,
helps the expulsion of the secretion
and produces a state of physical and
mits that there may sometimes be a
difficulty in applying the treatment.
Susceptibility varies according to age.
temperament, education, and social po-
sition. The practitioner has to bear
all these different conditions in mind
in selecting the kind of joke suited TO
the case with which he has to deal.
AS to sex, women are generally said
to be deficient in a sense of humor.
but they do not themselves think so
that, as Ancient Pistol says, is the
humor of it. Then there is the
matter OF race. The Latin races like
larger dose of the gros esprit Gaulois
in their jokes than our less primitive
ate. On the other hand, hyperboreans
otherwise blameless are often the sub
jects of an idiosyncrasy which renders
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-06-17
NEw YORK wEATnER KII.I.s.

NEW YORK. June 7.-AIthough the
temperature was several degrees lower
during the later part of the day and a
stin. cooling breeze from the north
east started MP tonight. the record OF
fatalities today exceeded by far those
of yesterday in this vicinity. Alto
gether there We're twenty-five deaths
from the heat in this locality. Ten Of
these victims were women. Aside
from this there were thirty-thrcc pros
trations. the victims of which are still
in the city hospitals. in a more or less
serious condition. In New York city
alone nineteen deaths were recorded mp
To- 10 o'clock tonight: and Hackcnsaok
Newark. Plainfeld. Passaic and Nor
ristown each reported one death. One
of the victims today was a suicide. who
took his life because OF his sunerings
from the heat.
Three additional deaths and several
serious prostratious were reported
after midnight.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-06-17
High=Class
Portraits.

Men and women are judged by the
expression and modelling OF the face,
good judge of human nature, to take
anything from the delineation of a
injustice. A good photographer must
be careful in the composition of por-
trait, for the camera cannot tell a lie.
Mr.. Davey guarantees perfect photo
graph.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-06-17

IF YOU WANT to have good
laugh go 20 the oRPHEUM tonight
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-06-17
Rough
Riders!

\ romplct. line % BOYS itouEA ks
crs outfit. Hat. Coat. Pants and tsrE-
gins-all sizes
Just received q large and prrtV A.
snrtmcut % Boys- FauntisTCy BiozEs--
White and Cuiorci-
\ fne ncW line of Mothers fTie's.
shirt Waists. which No are selling II
80 cents.
\ large variety 90 washable I4se4
suits for BOYS and Chiidrcu. from ti-ss
to- $3.50.
White Tiquc and Duck suits fos
BOYS. all sizes. from g. NJ
Our regular nnc limo OF Ge1ts
Clothing. Furnishings. Hats and CzFSA
Agents for Dr.. Dc!ms;'s L-l1ca-xese
Underwear. Scad For Ca;aroEr>
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-06-17

The mat reliable
Waist IN the market. We have
the same in the newest designs. also
White and Plain Black Lawns
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-02-28
Washington Correspondence.

Our old-time acquaintance, the
Senatorial dead lock. is with MS
once more. The Hull army bill is
the cause. The administration
says it shall be passed; a strong
minority of Senators that it shall
not. The President evidently
looks for the failure of the army
bill, and probably some of the
appropriation bills, as he has told
some of his callers during this
week, that he expected to issue a
proclamation on the Alb of March,
Immediately following the close of
the present session of Congress,
calling an extra session of the
Fifty-sixth Congress, to meet on
March 90, just as early as he
could call it together and give the
required fifteen days notice.
Some Senators are still working
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-02-28
May Abolish the Office.

At a meeting of the county
superintendent Tuesday after
noon of last week, State Supt.
Harvey, just before the adjourn
ment of the session, gave the out
line of measure that is being
prepared for presentation to the
legislature, which provides for the
abolition of the office of county
superintendent Of schools.
1t is proposed to create state
board to be composed of the pro-
fessor of pedagogy of the State
University, the State Board of
Examiners, three in number, and
the Institute conductors of the
several Normal schools. The
members of CHS board are to serve
without compensation. 1t will be
their duty to divide the state into
10 supervision districts, as near
ly equal as possible, and with the
county as the unite as far as pos
sible. The work of districting
the state is to be done before Jam
uary 1, 1901, and they shall
appoint one person from each
district as inspector Of the schools
in that district. The district
inspectors are to be paid from the
state treasury, out of the mill
tax levied for school purposes.
The state superintendent of
public instruction is to appoint
from his Office a suitable person
to act as secretary Of the board,
who shall also assist the members
of the board in distributing the
state.
The object Of the proposed law,
Supt. Harvey says, is to take the
superintendency ofcountry schools
out of politics. "More than 40
per cent of the county superin-
tendents who attended the State
Teachers convention at Milwau-
kee last December are now out of
office. A political club is used to
force the county superintendent
to give incompetent persons
certificates as teachers" said Mr..
Harvey. "They say to the super
intendent, "Do this or we will
fix you at the next election. By
this proposed measure men will
not have to depend on the caprice
of the politician for his position,
and his position will depend on
his competency to fill 1t alone.
More than So, 100000 are expend-
ed in this state each year upon the
district schools, and the return
under the present system is ridic-
ulously small. There are seventy
two county superintendent in
this state who are paid $58, 900.
The number of schools that some
of them have to look after makes
it impossible for them to do justice
to any. The measure proposes
to increase the number of sup
erintendents or inspectors to ITO,
but it will not make necessary
any additional tax. We have
8,416 district school teachers in
Wisconsin.
The proposed change has been
approved by the leading educators
of the state, and Prof. Harvey
has said that he thought it would
meet with the approval of the
county superintendent. True
Republican.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-02-28
Died.

WIGER-At her home in this city,
February 26, 1899, Mrs.
Christian N. Wiger, aged 81
years and 81 days.
Mrs. Wiger had been in feeble
health recently and it was found
necessary for her to submit to
critical surgical operation in the
vain hope to prolong her life.
Hermione S. Pratt was the
daughter of Mr.. and Mrs. G. r.
Pratt. She was born and reared
in River Falls. She graduated
from the Normal school in this
city in 1895, and afterwards
taught in the public schools IN
several cities of this state, her
last engagement being in the
schools In this city. Sept. 80,
1896, she was married to Christian
N. Wiger and the worthy young
couple started to housekeeping
under suspicious circumstances
with the fairest prospects of
happiness and prosperity before
them. And in a little more than
two short years of welded COM
partnership the fair young wife IS
cut down; the husband is desolate
and alone; the parents, brother
and sister are heart broken and
many friends mourn disconsolate
over this untimely death.
The funeral was held at her
late residence this afternoon at 2
o'clock, Rev. Mcintosh officiating.
"oh glory of our race that SO suddenly
decays!
oh crimson flush Of morning that darkens
as we gaze!
Oh breath of summer blossoms that on the
restless air
Scatters a moments sweetness and flies we
know not where"
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-02-28

Samuel-Don' t figure on marry
ing a model wife unless you are a
mind reader, and know for certain
that she takes Rocky Mountain
Tea.-C. r. Taggart & Co.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-02-28

and hoping that some sort OF
compromise can be reached on the
army bill that will avoid an extra
session, but how they can succeed
is difficult to understand, in view
of the positive statement of Sena-
tor Hawley, chairman of the
Military Committee, who has
charge of the Hull bill. that moth
ing short of that bill as reported
to the Senate would be accepted,
and the equally positive state
ment of Senator Cockrell, who
has charge of the minority bill
offered as substitute for the Hull
bill, that the opponents of the
Hull bill would not allow it to be
voted upon.
About the only new ,athing yet
brought out in the testimony be-
fore the Military Court Of Iniqui-
ty that is sitting on the ''embalm-
ed" beef scandal is that Gen.
Miles had no personal knowledge
on the subject. A number of the
officers have testified that they
found the canned beef unfit to eat,
but that the refrigerated beef was
fairly good. Inasmuch as the
witnesses heard have mostly
been those summoned at the re-
quest of Gen. Miles, the general
nature Of the testimony has been
somewhat surprising to the pub
lie, indicating that somebody
must have gone off half-cocked.
Public sentiment has been largely
with Gen. Miles, but Is rapidly
changing, and, if more proof is
not forth coming will soon be
just the reverse.
The fact that Senator Proctor
had served as Secretary of War,
added to the interest in his
arrangement Of the present
method Of making promotions and
filling vacancies in the army. He
detailed the common method used
by applicants for promotion or
appointment to vacancy in the
rank of Captain, to which one
might suppose that only the six
hundred or more first lieutenants
in the service would be eligible,
including both the political and
social "pull', and made this posi-
tive statement, "The man who
has the strongest pull, gets the
place. 1t is oftenest obtained on
political influence; sometimes on
personal and social" Senator
Proctor has offered an amendment
to the Hull army bill, now the
bone of contention in the Senate
which he claims will obviate the
defects In the system pointed out
by him.
1t has been known in Washing
ton for a long time that the rela-
tions between Senator Pettigrew
and the legislature Of South
Dakota were not over-cordiaI,
and they certainly will not be i'm
proved by speech just made by
Mr.. Pettigrew, of which the
following extract is a fair example
"If | SHOULD undertake to follow
the change of sentiment that
exists among the members of the
the legislature of South Dakota
/ would be voting on all sides of
every question"
The President is not above rum
ming the White House elevator
himself when the regular attend
ant happens to be absent. The
other day he brought Senator
Cullom down, and when they
reached the lower floor the Sena-
tor said: Il am glad to observe,
Mr.. President, that you are such
a good machine man" Smiling
quietly. Mr.. Mckinley, replied, in
reminiscent tone; "Bnt they
do not all run as smoothly as this
one -