davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1899-02-15
Qus 0owa.
alta Q lift a, Su., 9. Sebr. 1899.
Wert6er 6err Simon!

"rN~ SgN~ ~'"FN""
l1nfere 8uuernbriiber fenben ieBt fleiBtg
geri4te Elm, barum babe i9 in Der lebten
3eit ni9ts BON mir b0ren lafIen, i9 ba6te,
lpenn Der Srii6ling tommt, bann bat man
der feline 3eit gum S9rei6en, ba tDnuen
mir often, bic ni9ts gu t6un BADEN, nit
%unierer @eis6eit berausriifen. S9 fe6e
uber in Der n8etGage", baB bic alte 5arz
mersfrau in Soma etpas ungnGbig tpirS,
neil ib 10 lange ni9ts einge1anbt, ma6t
auer6ano @riinoe geltenb ipie @inter19laf
etc, uno i'd ite6e bod getp06nli9 bes Morz
gems auf, ipenn AUDI etpas ipdter, audi
.iino mir Die 2dune uno Sinte ni6t eingez
%froren, benn i9 bin 1. INNER luitiq, 2.
9alte ib es 6ier INNER tparm unb sum9ln=
geln beS gel6en Stebers babe i1 tpeber 2uIt
nod Neigung. Q6er gegen 0amen bin i9
INNER 8uporfOmmen0, 10 mill i9 benn
mitt6eilen, oaB unfere @ornernte audi gut
ausgefalen uno fat aGes f9pn Nnfangs
Nobember eingebra9t porben lit. Set benz
%. Nobember, mo Der erfte S9nee fiel,
6utten mir itetigen 8inter, Der S9nee lieat
iebt mod, d6er es 6erri9te INNER itiGe, gez
miit6li3e Witterung Bis gum 25. ~Sanuar,
BON oa an mar es bauernb re9t talt, II
"a @rab; es pirb bier ieben Sag 99tttz
ten gefabren.
Sd m09te meme 8a~ltern6riiber, bic cine
n9egenieitige 8utterfd6rit" betrei6en, barz
auf aufmertfam MAIDEN, baB, tpenn lie TIRE
Mil69eds ausitelen unb i6r 56abmeiter
Mitglieo lit, ie feline 2 gentszMarte barr
auf gu fle6en brau9en, po aber 8anfen
OOer @eT6dftsleute bic Qus3a6lung beIorz
gen, fpel4e tein Sntereffe an Der Sabrif 6a=
ben, ba lit cine 2 Gents Marfe erforberz
li6. S4 CLAUDE, BON alien 6armer3eugz
niffen bringen Butter unb Gier ben qr0B=
ten @epinn unO IS perosn groBe Nn1trenz
gungen gema3t, I'M bieIes 9eI9Gft gu 6e=
BEN. go lit iebt tpteber in Siour SANS
Der groBe National : gonbent obaebalteu
tporben; 900 Suhriten in 8tpDlf Stuuter
fanOten 8utterproben elm unb Soma trua
ben 1. preis babOn, MinneIota ben atpeiz
ten.
SeBt meme @nii9ten iiber @6tpeinez
trantbeiten. Die arant6eit baufte i'm leBten
Sabr grinoli4 gum eriten Mal in bieTer
9egenb unb mande Sarmer berloren faf
ale lire 56iere, etli3e 100 Stiif. SD
bemertte brei Derf9ieOene &rant6eiten un=
ter ben S9peinen, a6er ale purosn @6o>
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1899-02-15
Qus Uebrasfa.
pratrte Center, Nebr., 4. Sebr. 1899.
Wert6er 6err Simon!

pratrie Senter, Nebr., 4. Sebr. 1899.
Wert6er 6err Simon!
Sa BON Buffalo GpuntD, Nebrasfa, nod
ipeni9 in Der n8eiluge" mitget6eilt porben lit,
min i'd eintges ii6er bie1e @egenb 6eri6ten.
9as Sann bete6t burGpeg aus REDEEM,
19tpar5em S6umus6Ooen, unb 5par ebenioz
tpobl auf oenSo4ebenen 5ptiGen benz plattez
unb 2oupz5luB, als in ben 56Glern oiefer
5lthe, 1ppeit Is in Denielben ni9t ianbig lit.
Der groBe uno beina6e ein5ige Se6ler, ii6er
ben mir uns isOes Sabr gu b~etlagen baben, 1T,
bob mir i'm Na4iOmmer ni9t geniigenb &e=
gen betommen. 8is gum 4. Stuff bin felt
oas Corn INNER pra9tboQ aus, aber bunn
5apert es INNER nit benz Hegen unb bic
@ornernte fdqt bann 9spD6nli9 f9le9ter
aus, ais Die Sarmer e~rtparteten; 10 au9 ooriz
ges Sa6r. 8tr 4atten i'm 5rii6iabr big Wfitte
SUM- Re9en in 6ile uno Siiqe unb begten
grobe 90ffnungen, uber BON ba an mar es
NIT BEN Gegen aus. Wei5en ernteten mir
nur 9-12 8uibel per Ncre, &oggen 1870
8uf9el, Safer 2O-25 8uf6eG uno Gorn au9
20-25 8ufbel; aber bafir Itnb Die BreiIe,
nomentli3 BON Safer, @orn urpD &oggen,
better alS felt Sa6ren. 9us gilt au3 BON ben
RinODie6preilen, unb bic Surmer BADEN i'm
@an8en eenommen feline lrfa9e, gu fGagen,
Dap mir feline MiIiondre tperben, bufiir for
gen nutir1i9 i9on bic bielen SruIts, BDpls
unb 80rfenfpetulanten.
Mit ber3li4em 9ruB an Sic, 9err Simon,
Iopie an ale 8auernbriiber, 5ei9net
Sacob Stb.
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1899-02-15
Qus 0notana.
&o9eiter, Snb., 5sbr. 1899

&o9efer, Sno., 5e5r. 1899.
9ee9rter 9err Simon!
Sd m09te bemerfen, baB i9 nit ben On
fi9ten bes 6rn. &rehiq in Spna gang UNI
gar iibereiniimme; man foute jeocn @ogel
pfetfen IaIen, pie linn Der 56na6eI ges
tpa6ien 1T unb Elm Sober ipGte feline duf~
ri9tige Meinung iiber cine Gsftimmte 0es
genb pber Sadie GuBern.
ST. 2eube in SuinOis mO@ts germ piiien,
mas yMud" 1T; bas lit Elm NtuorhOoen unb
tpte i6 foG6sn bebunble, 5abe l4 in Der
leBten Nummer her n8eilage" ponl cortgen
Sabre angegeben; i3 bin neugierig, Git 5Oz
rem, ME Mnbere nit Inn umIpringer.
@mil 6uDtmalfer.
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1899-02-15
Don einem 5mfer.
MImont Station, Sa,, 81. San. 1899.
@eehrter 0err Simon!

@as 1T benin nit ben Smter6riibern los,
bic la1en ia iebt 10 ipenig BON ii9 b0ren;
audi iber bic GbicagOer 9onigpreiie babe iG
in ben leBten Sabren ni6ts gslefen, ma, biz
perben pobG aud ni9t erpG6nenspert6 fem,
i9 CLAUDE, ba gebt es pie nit Der Butter,
es giebt &unibutter unb tpirb ppbI auG
8unftbonig 9eben. 9tefen @inter tperben
fi9 pieIe Smter t%punbern, baB ibnen 10 biele
8ienen iterben; BON meinen IS St0den fin1
f9On Is e%ingegangen, pabrf4einIi4 leibeu
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1899-02-15
Qus WYomtna.

Hof springs, @pO., %, San. 1899.
Wertber 9err Simon!
Sd tbetle Sbnen nit, buB tb in ben
ndbften Sagem na6 @batcDm Gouatp,
Wa1b, iiberiieole unb bort i'm NoofIadz
3Rale GARNER perbe. S9iden sic meme
Setting, bite, na4 2pnben in ienem
@Ountp. SIM Safe beutf4e 2anbSGeute
bort mid aufiu@en mpGen, bin :b gerne
berett, tbnen guteS 2anb gu 5eigen.
Mit freun6Ii4em @ruB
6. 3etGaff.
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1899-02-15

9isrmit IenOe iA S6nen bas @slo fir bic
3ettung uno pini9e einen 8ulenber. Sd
tpiini6e unierem geebrten 9errn Simon fri
f@en Mutb gu Ieiner oielen burten Nrbeit,
Die ibm bic f9One u8eiluge" bereitet.
% m. 9aemdnn.
Illinois Staats-zeitung., 1899-02-15
9cribnsr, Dodge g., Nebr., 8. 6eb. 1899.
@eehrter 6err SimOn!

Sd bin nun felt IA Sabren N6onnent Der
81. Staatsz3tg." unb tpGbrenb bieIer 3eit
bate i9 Iie nur Elm Sa6r abbeitelt, neil i9
gu biel 2efetoff an 9anO bate; bo9 pbne
Oieies quite 8latt uno bic r8eilage" mO9te ih
ni9t me9r Ietn, ie intereiiirt MIDI iebr. Sd
ba9te ba6er, i3 poQte au9 einmal ettpas
iber unfer Gountp fir bic r8eilage" f@reiz
ben, Die Grnte lit bier 3iemGi6 gut ausgez
fallen, 6afer bra3te 600 8ui6el bonn
Qcre, @si3en 1875 8ui6el, Gorn 1870
8ui6eG unb @erfte $40 8ui6el. 8tee=
unb SimOt6D@9eu babe i9 BON Is Ncres 30
Sons einge6eimt, i'd bate a6er Elm Orittel
me6r ernten t0nnen, penn mir ni4t 10 Diel
pur6 l1eberi9pemmung Derloren gegangen
pGre. &artoffeln, @epfel, &iri9en, pfluuz
men, Srauben uno anbere 9artenFri4te ipcrz
ben 6ier 10 biel g%eerntet, pie Elm Sober fir
ii9 brau9t, AUDI 8irn6duale gebeiben bier
gang gut, mir BADEN iel6it pel4e angepflun3t
unb 6atten i'm %borigen Sommer au9 f90ne
8irnen baran. Sir Corn lit Der preis ieBt
26 Gents per 8ui6el, fir Safer % Gents,
@ei3en IS Gents. 9us meiIte Corn ~berfiitz
tern mir an Stiere unb S9peine, duf pel6e
0eiie mir fir infer Corn 30-45 Gents per
8u1beG e~r3teten, babel beiBt es aber uufgez
pubt! Sd babe in 1901 in Tranfrei9
babel 9ebolfen, Die 8ot66oien gu berflopfen,
unb bin nun felt Is Sabren 6ier, na9bem i)
3uerlt in Grete, WtG GOuntp, Sainois, gez
nobnt bate. Wdbrenb oieier 3eit babe i)
bier mod feline Se6lernte ge6abt. Sd begann
nit 5000 unb babe ieBt 225 Qcres 2anb bret
Meilen bon Der Stubt. 2anbprei1e 1telen
ft9 auf $40 Bis $50 per Mcre, mein 2anb
piirbe t9 unter $50 per Ncre ni3t bertaufen,
W}ein lieber 6err @ilte, mag Iagen sic
nun oa3u2 SOl4e @erbGltnifie i3etnen in
S6rer @egenb in Nebrastu nidt gu berri9en,
benin Sic I6rei6en in Der v8eitage" bonn Is.
Sanuar, baB mir ale 5 Bis 8 Sabre nur ELM
NAL ernten; fpenn bas Der San tpGre, 10 t0nn=
ten bic Sarmer bier Ii4 nt4t ioIbe Wobn>
paldite bauen.
Das nun bic 8eri9te aus M6atcom
Gountp in Waf6ingtOn anbetrifft, baB un=
Iere lie6en 8%auernbriiOer bort auf 5-1O
Nder 2anO Elm gutes SOrttOnmen finben
%t0nnen, 10 mag Oas pObI 10 fein, uno ipsnn
i9 es ni9t glauben %lpolte, 10 tpiirOe i9 boG
Gieber erit einmul bingeben unb mir bic Sc
genb uni6auen, ebe ih einen ebrli9en Mann
gum 2iigner itempelte. Mein Na9bar, elm
poblbabenber Sarmer, nor 8pei Sabre in
GalifOrnien unb bate ii6 in Der Ndbe BON
Sos Qn9eIes 10 @cres 0anb getauft, bod
ME fhneG fam Der tpieber 3uriif! Oa mar
ni9t 9enug gu beroienen, Tim lein 2e6en gu
frtiten, unb nun 1T mein Na9bar nit einem
8erIuit bon $1,000 tpieber auf feline 160ne
8roBe 5arm bier ge3o9en. Gs fGeint benz
nu3 bod ni4t 10 melt fer gu Iein nit ben
Apritufen.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
Annearances Are Deceitful.

The members Of the now celebrated
Twentieth Kansas regiment, who will re-
turn from the Philippines some time this
summer and for whom the Kansans are
making large preparations to welcome
royalty, left their native state almost in
disgrace. The regiment, which was then
without uniforms was composed almost
wholly of farmer boys, selected because
Of their physical strength and build. 1t
is a regiment of young giants. After be-
ing mustered in the regiment was
marched past the statehouse for review.
AS the farmer soldiers marched along
the street they were the subject Of jest.
AS they were marching by the state
house the recruiting physician said to
Gov. Leedy: There is regiment of
fighters. They are built like giants.
They will do honor to the state if they
ever get Il chance" They may be all
right physically" Gov. Leedy remarked,
with a shrug of the shoulders, but their
personal appearance is against them"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
Banknotes of Ancient Times.

Among the products of civilization
which were familiar to the Chinese many
centuries before they came into use in
Europe may be reckoned banknotes.
There is at this moment in the posses
sion of the Bank of England a specimen
supposed to be one Of the Oldest extant
dating from the Fourteenth century of
our era. 1t is now proved, however, that
paper money was issued in China as early
as S07 A. d. These securities closely
resembled the famous French assignats
in being based upon the estates of the
kingdom. The Bank of Stockholm claims
to have been the first Western institu-
ton to adopt a paper currency, but the
Bank Of England must have followed
very close with its EGO notes, which were
issued in 1896
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
Bali Bearings on the Farm.

1t is probably q safe prediction that all
manufacturers of harvesting machinery
will eventually adopt ball bearings wher-
ever it is possible to use them. In 1891
the Deering Harvester Company of Chi
cago equipped all their machines with
ball and roller bearings. and the great
popularity Of the idea led other manufac-
turers to experiment with several styles
of roller bearings, hoping to apply them
to their machines without appearing to
initiate the originators too closely The
application of ball bearings is more cost
ly, but popular demand will yet force all
competitors to follow the lead of the
Deering Company.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

There Ia more Catarrh In this section OF
the country than all other diseases put to-
Sether and until the last few years was sup
posed to be incurable For great many
years doctors pronounced it a local dis
ease. and prescribed local remedies. and by
constantly failing to cure with local treat
ment, pronounced it incurabIe Science has
proven catarrh to be constitutional disease
and therefore requires constitutional treat
ment. Halls Catarrh Cure manufactured
by +. J. Cheney 4 Co.. Toledo Ohio. is the
only constitutional cure on the market. Il
is taken internally in doses from 10 drops
to tablespoonful. 1t acts directly on the
blood and mucous surfaces Of the system.
They offer one hundred dollars for any case
1t fails TO cure. Send for circulars and tes-
umonials. Address.
F. ]. CHENEY G. Co., Toledo o.
Sod by DruggiStS 15c.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
The Temptation of Skill.

The head of a family in nearby city
was lately debating with friend whether
to accept the opinion of a leading specialist
that certain surgical operation should
be performed. He is a lawyer and ex-
pressed with lawyer-like precision: 1.-The
temptation of skill is SO great that it can
not be safely disregarded in accepting
the verdict of our leading surgeons. The
general medical consultants defer so en-
tirely to the specialists that no new light
can be had from them. One knows
not what to do"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Hall Game confesses that he likes TO
be kicked, as long as the thing is done in
public, and makes him conspicuous or no.
torious. He says in the London Mail:
Even the siiiest personal reference I
ever see, however inspired by paltry feel
ings, seems to me by implication tribute
and compliment, being recognition of
the fact that | am a factor worth count
ing with and an adversary worth fight
ing. And when the most false, the most
mean, and the most beittling of the kind
has ceased to appear, [ shall know that
| am no longer Of the least account
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

The recent edict Of the King of Siam
allowed in the streets of Bangkok, under
penalty of a fine, is proving Il hardship to
parents, as the children unaccustomed
to any raiment, cast off what is put on
them as soon as they are out of sight of
their parents.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
Shake Into Your Shoes

Aliens Foot Ease. a powder for the feet.
It cures painful swollen, smarting, nervous
feet and instantly takes the sing out Of corns
and bunions. It's the greatest comfort dis
coyery CT the age. Allen s I, ot-Ease makes
tight-fitting or new shoes feel easy. It is a
certain cure for sweating, callous and hot,
tired, aching feet Try it day. So d by all
druggists and shoe stores By mail for 25c,
in stamps. Trial package FREE. Address,
A len S. Olmsted, lie Roy. n Y
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Los Angeles draws its electricity
from turbulent mountain river ninety
miles away. The 2O00-horsepower runs
street cars and machinery and supplies
the city with light and heat
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
SPINNING WHEEL.
ALAS! tbs OFTEN THUS.

ALAS. tbs OFTEN THUS.
He sent her u golden locket
Set with Il sapphire blue.
For that he wrote in his letter,
is the color for lovers true.
And he envied the shining bauble
Whenever he saw it rest
In the viOlet-scented laceS
That folded her snowy breast
But she happened to lose the trinket
As she walked in the twilight gray,
And he was the one who round it
Where wet with the dews it lay;
He lifted the jewel, smiling:
But picture his rage who can
When he opened and found within
The face of another mani
Town Topics.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

The high court Of India has refused.
on general principles of sex. to enroll as
a legal practitioner Miss S0rabji. a Par
see lady who has had q singularly dis
tinguished English university career.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

On December 1, 1898, there were en-
rolled in all the public schools in Phila-
delphia 145,302 scholars. There was eX-
pended on the schools for that city dur
ing 1898 the sum of $3,77S,05S.S4.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

5 or 10 Acres-Will furnish good living and com
tortsole nome for family in the Upper Willamette
Valley frult. poultry gar len. Mild winters cool
summers, neair ful. Write for information to w. F.
DUNLAP, Eus le, Oregon
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
T. i. Of1 EN- T. q OO., IOItUO,
Scld by Druggists, 15c.

DR.. Matthew Woods of the Univer-
sity of Pennsylvania recently read a pa
per in which he condemned the use of
tobacco because it is a promoter Of con-
tent. He holds that discomfort is the
great incentive to material and mental
I'D
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Coughing Leads to Consumption.
Kemp's Bals;im will stop the cough at
once. Go to your druggist today and get
a sample bottle free. Sold IN - and 90
cent bottles. Go at once; delays are dam
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

a dental authority declares that it is
not uncommon at the present time to
find infants with decayed teeth and girls
of Il or 16 wearing artificial teeth.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

One hundred and fifty cans Of white
fish, containing 100000 whiteisb, from
the hatchery at C;,lendonia, \. Y. We're
planted in Lake Ontario the other day.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Piso's Cure for Consumption is the
best of all cough cHres.-GeorGe W. Lott,
Fabucher. La. August &c. 1895.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Army engineers declare that New
York harbor will be in a perfect state of
defense against any foreign foe by July
/ 1901.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

There are in Paris three great slaugh-
ter houses, where 100000 head Of cattle
are killed annually.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

MERE everywhere who suffer almost con-
stanty because they bring themselves to tell
"A all about their ills to physician.
surely explain their symptoms and their
suffering Mrs Pnkha Mass for the
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
Lanes Family Medicine.

Moves the bowels each day. In order
to be healthy this is necessary. Acts
gently on the liver and kidneys. Cures
sick heada che. Price. % and SOC.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

1t is predicted that the apple crop in
Kansas this year will be the largest in
the history of the state.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

fdence reposed in her has never been
violated. Over a million women have
been helped by her advice and medicine.
Mrs. Pinkham in attending to her vast
correspondence is assisted by women
only. If you are Ill, don't delay. Her
reply will cost you nothing and it will be
practical help as it was to MISS ELLA E.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Arkansas City has woman who
claims to have Tilted Fred Funston and
married another nan five years ago.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

In Prussia only G491 Of 100000 at
tempts at suicide were successful.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Mrs. CONGRATULATED dear, are you
sure Mr.. Woody loves you for yourself
alone?' Mabel-"Yes, I'm sure he does,
mamma He is always so restless when
you are in the room. '-Tid-Bits.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Lord Justice Romer of England has
swept away a venerable precedent and
established a greatly improved one in its
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30
a WOMAN
EEE:K.PS
WOMEN

BRENNER East Rochester, Ohio, who says II snTtnk TOM
the ordeal examination physician yet knew must
NY troubles backache nervous tired
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

WANTED.-Case of bad health that R.i'P'A'NS will
not benefit. Send cents to RiDanS Chemical Co.,
New York, for 10 samples and l000 testimonials
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

place. The old one was in case where
two judges had delivered opposite judg-
ments, and a third observed oracularly
Il agree with my brother \ for the rea-
sons given by my brother B. This is,
of course, well known, but the new one
is much finer. Lord Justice A. L. Smith
had delivered Judgment, dismissing an
appeal. Lord Justice Collins said: ~
agree" Il also agree" said Romer, l..
J. "One moment said Collins; Il
haven't finished yet" and he proceeded
to give his reasons Then there was a
solemn pause and everybody looked anx-
lously at Romer. Firmly, if somewhat
sadly, he spoke: Il still agree"
Mrs. Yungkupple-"Yo used to think
it great privilege once just to hold my
hand Mr.. Yungkupple-''And don't
think just as much Of you as ever?"
Mrs: Yungkupple-'If you did, you
wouldn't be away every night holding
other hands at the poker table. Boston
TRANSCRIPT
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

About the first thing a well-to-do
American family does on landing on Lon
don soil is to hunt up the American con-
sulate and inquire the points of the town,
says the Cincinnati Enquirer. One Of
the things most sure to be recommended
is the Little Old Lady in Threadneedle
street, as the greatest bank in the world
is Jocularly called. Ladies like to visit
the vaults Of the Bank Of England.
They love to see the tons of shining gold
and the bales of crisp 'uns." The other
day certain New England capitalist
was making the rounds with his little
daughter, a typical Yankee girl of sweet
10. The treasurer, who had reason to
be particularly polite to the American,
handed the young lady a $4,000 note to
hold for moment. She demurely said:
Thank you ever so much,' and opened
her tiny purse preparatory to depositing
1t snugly therein. She had partly folded
1t when the genial treasurer started and
said
Il really didn't give it to you to keep
Miss innocence opened wide her beau
tful eyes, and as she returned it quietly
Remarked:
beg your pardon-I misunderstood
you; thought ii was a souvenir
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Mrs. yEistsIow's SOOTHING syrup for children
teething, softens the gums, reduces Inflammation,
ailays pain, cures wind collie. 25c Il bottle.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Young housewife TO obliging friend)-
Did YOU tell the butcher to send me a
leg Of mutton?'' Obliging Friend-"Yes.
dear; but he said he had no legs Of NUT
ton III today, so | told him to send you
leg of beef instead. Tit Bits.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Conditional Superstition-"Wou you
be willing to eat at a table where there
We're thirteen people?' We'll, a good
deal would depend upon whether | was
goin' to get the meal fer nothin' or not"
Life
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Mrs Blanks ''just-over' maid is in the
habit of wrapping herself in a voluminous
brown shawl whenever she stirs abroad
The warm weather has made no differ
ence; the shawl is worn just the same
Bridget said Mrs. Blank the other
day, Il should think you'd be uncom-
fortably warm in that shawl. Why don t
you leave it off, now that spring has
Gomez What cried Bridget; land
show me fgger. Shure, ma am, an ye
can't name for ME to so out loike that a.
shown me fggert-New York Sun
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Home -Wilkins-''Deuced pref
ty girl l saw at your window. Is she
foreign:' Bill1ins-"No; a domestic."-
Brooklyn Life.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Mother-''Where are you off to
Hans?" Hans-''To school; teacher i
going to show us the eclipse Of the moon
toni CHIT" Mother-"Here, you stay al
home: if your teacher wants to show yor
anything he can do it during schoo
hours ''-1it-B
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

His Comment-'At least" said the
artist. who was engaged in painting q
portrait of the president of the Fat Men's
club, this is one picture the critics can't
accuse of lack in BREADTH and coiof." =
indianapolis Journal
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-30

Things in old Kentucky are not like
they used to be-" sighed Senator Lindsay
at the Riggs house in Washington as he
laid down a Louisville paper in the pres
ence of Star reporter and gazed remin-
lscently into space.