New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1899-06-05
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

When the late Lord Cairns was LORD Chancehor
he vas an ex oficio visitor Of lunatic asylums' IL
g. .o,o,od that he went down one Wednesday, when
rho neors do not sit 10 Hanwell, knocked at the
door and asked TO be admitted
Cant let you in." said the janitor; Gays io'
visitors Tuesdays and Fridays
Put have a right to go inside said His Lord
ship; II insist doing So
"pead the regulations" and the janitor pointed 70
them. -,
DO YOU know who I ann" asked LORD cairns
Don't know. and don't care" said the menial'
~ am entitled to admission at any and every
hour; am Lord Chancellor of England
"Ah, ah" laughed the janitor, as he smut the
entrance gates in the noble lord ; race eve so'
four OF EN- inside already.
Lord slapbang-I am proud to . shake the hand or
one Of Americas uncrowned kings n,ordor - he
Richard Croker 60 b6dy wGnu ast have we
been stuflng him about Platt'-'fuch'
"Tba Easton ChId) Ledger" tells OF an old Mr.
Peter Tarr OF that place. who was clerk when
Young man in a uauor-dealer's store. MY en-
mover was a religious man., said MI Iarr' a
regular protracted meeting singer. Sometimes on
Sunday mornings a negro called Uncle JACK "ouiu
,rv 70 buy a pint OF liquor. and the dealer would
sing with tune and fervor;
at don't sell no rum on Sunday,
Glory halleutah,
Turn the spigot and help yourset
And put the money on the shelf,
Glory, haelujah!
NJ Tarr was himself local preacher. Who's
going 10 preach at the Methodists this morning
was once asked old Mr.. Bullitt. the president oi
Tho Easton Bank Peter Tarr," was the reply
"po,ab Tabr, exclaimed the old gentleman In
amazement. "Petah Tail Where In the III ala
Petah get anything to preach He doubted the
validity of that Peters orders.
$500. co,,,,o I-ncla-well Tommy. my little
man Whaf are YOU going to do when you grow up!
Tommy-Tm going TO grow oearo
sos / wont have so much face to wash. DE
trot Journal
The secretary of the Kansas State Agricultural
Society has issued a report on the sheep anu JUS
raising Industries in the Commonwealth he con-
trasts the facts that the 100000 acres OF lana
g., Tho state there is but one sheep to each 30
acres while the number of dogs in the State IS
,7s COO Two years ago the sheep outnunoered Tue
dogs by 30 per cent while last year this percehae
was reduced to II. In one county there were 90
dogs to each sheep and in twelve selected couhI'eS
,bero were 200 dogs to each sheep. He thinks ooth
49,, ard dogs have their places. but depores the
nraeent condition lie notes that the dog crop Is
oxemnt from the vicsstudes Of other industries
and that neither the tariff nor free trade seems 10
affect It,
Ono dav Tommy accompanied his mother on
ehonnIng expedition and seeing a large candy man
IL with wistfui look; then. turning away regret ie
fully he said: Mamma, could llek thar IT., neao"
Deel Isle Me. smiles good -naturedly at the mis-
take of some city papers, which call IL Deer ISL
ord " "a though having in mind Bostons penai
Colony and speak Of It as typical fisherman
village" 1.-THE Deer Isle Press says: Deer isie
NAV be a typical fisherman village. yet we are
tony Just the same. Some OF our citizens wear kla
gloves to drive oxen while others wear DONE"
shirts and cuffs TO plant their gardens NO na'ter
what the papers call IT, well get there Just the
same. >"
Mrs told her man-servant "a c9orSr SIu u
ro C the other day. Coming in soon AFTER she
found him hOPeessy aS IN b Inc sds as
enough to warm a regment Have you nerer
made FIRE before Ws w nna S amt ai never made
what yo call a refined hre-no ma ann was inc
puzzled repy.-(tiarpers Bazar'
Siberia is ahead OF this country in some Things
according to John W. Bookwalter who says; Az
every station on the railway there Is p'aeea
IN front OF the station. at a point convenient VI
access by the passengers a large cask Oh cooi
water that has been boiled and II is the duty OF the
s,atIon-master to see that the supply Is kept up.
This Ia free to all passengers. even to tho poorest
auiqrant whose comfort and welfare are pro-
vIded for In many ways with thoughtfui care
Decoete-snv had been unable to a., attend emo the
| hau and he had gone alone. Naturally she was
| anyious IN know something about H. ,,u,.
| Won saw Mrs. Wilkins she SAID ihquirihsiS'
| 81 did" ne answered ,s
| How was she dressedT she asked, r,,,s,,z
II saw only Mrs. wilkins" he rephed.-t"as ni"s-
ton Star
A bookseller In an English provincial city recent
| 10 discovered one OF his statesmen arranging Some
new comics of Walt Whitman's Leaves OK Hrass
on the shelves devoted to books on gardening
Moro War IIterature.-"Dave Dwiggs thihks ne
has made a literary success at last
What is it,? 49,. ,o,,.r. hs and his wife
have written 10 their son in Manila
Record,
A writer IN 1.-THE American Cultivator' says: "A
descendant OF the Puritans Informs me that MS
aged mother always resented the modern slang OF
calling every active little child a kid. Her own
| bohies she insisted. were precious lambs and IL
they lived would grow up and be sheep TO he Goo >
especial favorites, while. she said. young kid
could never be anything but n goat. however old
I, might grow But. whatever their reasons the
! purltans never took kindly to the goat. They pre-
fcrred to grow sheep
Mattress Bridget. told you wanted all the
! eggs for breakfast soft. and several were quite
hard. a, A., . ~. ~,
| Bridget-sure num- they were all In to bile the
same length OF time only some OF mem lelt the
| heat more than others.-(Brooklyn Life