Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1899-06-01

seemed SO uncommonly brilliant that
he thought it merited a repetition of
the remark.
BY Jovel" he said again.
/ Ihco he flung away his cigar and
gazed earnestly at the smoldering
stump for five minutes, after which
he finished the cocktail, set down the
/ glass with a crash and calculated:
| III do it! Jovei if she doesn't call
that getting out of the rut, I'll give
it up"
With one of the young mans ener-
getic disposition to think is to act. so
when he had finally decided to lure
the young woman's affections in the
| direction of himself by means of a
personally conducted advertising cam
palgn he lost no time in commencing
operations.
AS a preliminary step in the mat
Ter the young man hunted up his late
companion for the purpose of working
that individual for little information.
he didn't know much about the gentle
art of advertising himself, therefore he
| 1elt the need of a few pointers, and
when he succeeded in locating his
| friend in the billiard room watching an
! exciting game he drew him off to one
side and propounded leading ques-
ton.
See here, Tom" said he, you're a
journalist and must know something
about advertising. What are the essen
tlal features of good advertisements
What have you?" asked Tom. "a
dyspepsia cure, or new. food for in
fants?"
Neither" replied Jack. II merely
have curiosity"
I'm that case said Tom, sit can be
easily satisfied. Select a couple of at
| tractive catch-lines, fill in with few
terse sentences, and if possible offer
something free. This sort of an adver-
tisement will sell anything that's
made
"Ah! thanks" said Jack. "CIose
game, isn't it?''
And he returned to the big chair
His next move was to order news
papers and writing materials. Then
he spent an hour diligently studying
the advertising columns of the papers
and examining the various forms of
advertisements, following which he de-
liberated with himself concerning the
amount of space he should use. Con-
sidering the character of the goods
he concluded that delicate little space
OF about three inches would be the
proper size, and that the best position
would be on the page where the fear
fully and wonderfully constructed
maidens were wont to pose arrayed in
the latest fashions. As far as selecting
a medium was concerned he didn't have
much trouble. He remembered that
Mollie's fayorite newspaper was the
Saturday edition of the Evening Uni
verse, which was largely devoted to
''styles," and he accordingly decided
to place his business in its columns.
Then he turned his attention to the
preparation of his first ad.
This, he found, looked easier than it
really was. Good catch-lines failed to
suggest themselves with any degree of
promptitude, while the something
free" seemed absolutely impossible.
But another examination of the news
papers obviatef the former difficulty,
and after a long cogitation he hit on
an idea that overcame the latter;
whereupon he once more seized his pen
with feverish haste, and finally sue
ceeded in producing an affair that
struck him as being attractive, unique
and appropriate, and possessing quail
ties which he thCught ought to have
some effect.
And the pioneer advertising cam
paign having for its object the wooing
of a woman was at last begun.
On the following Saturday advertis-
ing circles were mildly amazed to see
in the usually sedate columns of the
Evening Universe this remarkable adj
vertisement:
MOLLIE KNOWS
all about the state or my affections because
/ have already given her information con-
corning it, Moreover, she will doubtless be
able to recall the fact that on the occasion
of our last interview 1 intimated that 1 |
would not take mo" for an answer. In this |
connection wish to mention for her bene-
fit that while there are many thousands of
words in the English language,
ONE GIVES RELIEF
If it is the right one. And will also sug |
gest that the little word yes will relieve |
me of further anxiety and make both her |
and me happy for life.
To write yes" and forward it to my ad- |
dress nothing more is required than sheet |
of note paper, an envelope, and a postage |
stamp. L will furnish these articles Free |
on Request JACK.
Now, there were several thousand |
Mollies and an equal number of Jacks |
in the city; therefore, these two names |
failed to furnish clew to the identity |
OF either the advertiser or the ''peo- |
ple'' he wanted to reach. OF course, |
there was much speculation INDUCED |
in, and several theories were advanced; |
but it was generally believed that the |
advertisement was not to be taken seri-
ously-that it was merely band |
wagon attempt on the part of some |
enterprising manufacturer to attract |
public attention preparatory to the ar |
rival of his main parade, and that this |
space would ere long be filled with the |
unrivaled merits of new patent medi- |
cine, beauty promoter, or brand of |
complexion soap.
Jack had counted on a condition |
something like this following the APP |
pearance of his ad., so he was perfect |
ly satisfied with the results.
True, he felt rather tremulous when
he considered the matter calmly, but |
nerved himself with the consoling /
thought that he certainly was getting
out of the rut.
The week passed very slowly to Jack.
Also, it passed without bringing a reply
to his advertisement; but as he scarce