The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1899-02-16

doctrine" Well1 should say that it
was fairly poor verse, at that. Were it
not for the signature under it, it would
class magazine.
Xxx
The son of Abner Mckinley has;
been appointed a lieutenant of cavalry
and the canteen has been abolished.
Between these calamities it is expected
that enlistments in the army will show
a considerable falling off.
Xxx
They have peculiar reasons for di-
vorce over in England. Viscount
Barring got divorce from his wife just
because she liked Brougham.
w
The story is told of an EImira man
who married woman miles away by
telephone. If that Nebraska girl whose
lover went back on her at the last mo.
ment because her breath smelled of
cigarettes had only thought of the tel
ephone scheme.
Xxx
There are times when l can't appre-
ciate a joke. For instance when L
asked the Deputy if there would be
any blowout here on Monday, in honor
of Old Abe. The Deputy says: "You
bet there will be blowout at a. m.
and BLOWN at 6 p. m"
That is no joke at all.
.*&
The Tennessee legislature has passed
a law making it crime to shoot craps.
This is another outrage upon the COL
ored race.
There is talk of changing the flag of
the United States by taking out all the
stars but one, which would stand for
"the star of empire" 1t would also be
appropriate to make the ground hog
the national bird of expansion.
~
"Take up the white mans BURDEN
said McGOOley, as ne picked up the
hod.
Nv
A man in Nebraska, who did not
believe in banks, put $4,000 in an un.
used stove for safe keeping. His wife
not knowing the contents, built a fire
in the stove. When the man found
out what happened, he went out in the
barn and suspended. The verdict of
the coroner's jury was "justifiable sui.
eide"
Prisoners are very ungrateful some
times. This is proven by convict at
a camp in the South, where they kept
two bloodhounds to prevent the prison
ers from getting lonely. Well, one
morning recently this convict turned
up missing, and it was also found that
he had taken the bloodhounds with
him. The officials are now out whist
ling for lost dogs.
**.
The state of New Jersey enjoys i'm.
munity from state taxation on account
of the income it receives from licens-
ing corporate conspiracies to prey up
on the rest of the United States.
*
The Idaho legislature has passed
law against gambling. The question
naturally arises what will the inhabi-
tants do now for living?
Xxx
Hereafter persons travelling on the
St. Paul street cars will be compelled
to carry their own spitoons, as it is
hereafter "unlawful to spit in or from
any car"
~
1t has remained for Minneapolis
man, named John Brown, to get the
proper kind of revenge on the man
who invaded his domestic pasture.
Brown got divorce, and then he went
to the county clerk and got license to
marry for his former wife and the
interloper. Then he made him marry
her.
m**
The citizens of the United States are
knocking the tar out of the subjects of
the United States over in the the
Philippines.
The sleighing is good this cold wealth
or hut sIavjnp seems To he inst as good
in the Philippines, although they have
had no snow there. Come to TT ink of
it, perhaps it is just as we'll that 1 am
in prison or somebody would probably
do that clio could hc