The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1899-10-07
.HERE AND MERE.


They are calm 1t a study with q new
hlgh-fangled name,
They are teaehin' It at Morgantown an
braggin' on the same,
An gals are leayin' home to Interview the
To learn domestic science" or house
keepin' q 10 mode!
They are teachin' them to knit an sew an
ventilate o room,
The art Of fryin' buciswheat an the move
The trick Of Ironin' collars an the way to
make bed
There are treRtlses on Washboards an
PONIES on bakin' bread.
An the gals that wouldn't sew a brothers.
buttons on. -.
An Dream RSSGT S q ne diplomas that proudly
In sc snqyt o. any Tribute to the pies that
mother made"
An, old.tlme dIspensation, when the
kitchen was the school,
The palate, the professor, and q mothers
word, the rule!- -. .A.,,,u 10
But the world It keeps a-moVin'; they u DC
An GG Tannin f0o 81 y trolley from the table
TO yer throat!
Two organ grinders ran amuck Of
each other one morning this week. 1t
was in the Eighth ward. One turned
into Jacob street with his movable up
right plano and duly proceeded to turn
on aust One Girl" Unnoticed, the
other itlnerant musician had taken q
stand on the opposite side OF the street
and when he heard the strains from tne
other instrument, he hesitated as
though he would choose another 10
cality But he didn't. He realized tnat
competition is the life OF the traae, 30
commenced inserting life into that spe-
cIal section OF the town. Jasper Jen-
kIns' Cake Walk" was his masterpiece
and he turned the crank with Will
The two pianos playing different tunes
produced a Babel Of dlscOrdant SOUNDS
and q din that evoked angry and pro-
fame shafts on the heads Of the two rl-
val sons of sunny Italy. Not copper
did either receive.
When the music came to its finale
the two pianos wheeled on further up
the street. and when one stopped IN
front Of a corner saloon, the other Da-
20, mad at the condition OF thlhsS'
halted his machine a Few feet away
The men scowled Mt each other, ana
flash of stilettOs seemed very likeiy.
Soon ION the Banks OF the WaoaSh
began drilling on the cool OCTOBER
morning air, and 1t was followed an mn, IN
stant later by "There'll be q Hot Time
m the Old Town Tonight" The crash
ing and rolling OF the tunes jumbled In
TO a conglomeration of mixed melody
which became noise, and the crowd that
drew near wouldn't stand for It.
Schoolboys Joined in the guying OF the
Italians. who swore at each other as
they sweated at the cranks. ana
frightened citizen hurried to the near
est engine house to telephone for a
policeman, for he feared murder
But his fears were groundless' Al
the conclusion Of their respective tunes
the pianos were started on the Journey
and again they were travelling In the
same direction. Neither so far had re-
ceIVed n cent for his music. ana renson
evidently regained its throne. for wnen
the Italians reched Thirty-third street,
there was a parting of the ways. Both
were too disguised to continue the
pace, and 50 they sought pastures over
which each had monopoly.
wheeling makes the finest stogies in
the world" said a Wheeling cigar job
Der yesterday. but we don't seem to
understand the cigar business so well.
Just as much money is expended for
rnaterla! and labor, but the fine art OF
sweating, re-sweating, curing and dry
ing the tobacco. and combination OF the
several leaves and their grades, Is alb
sent. Exclusive cigar factories en-
ploy specialists in these lines. who give
their sole attention to the features I've
mentioned. This is a stOgie town. sure
enough, but the palm for cigars must
be yielded to some Others"
"Mannington is one OF the pest
towns in the state" continued the
speaker. ito sell cigars, and ten centers
have large call there. A college town
like Morgantown, Is poor for the traoe |
Where students assemble, the pipe ana
the cigarette reign supreme"
A local clothing house advertised to
sell ''black mems SUITS" and one Of the
clerks yesterday became speechless,
when asked by n colored gentleman to |
SHOW some o. dem suits To- black |
men. The clerk explained how 1t was |
easily enough after he came to. and the !
colored customer left him with the re- |
mark that he wasn't searching for |
black clothes; "he had expected some
thing loud"
A local haberdashery is offering for !
sale suits Of linen underwear. This !
kind of garment is little known In |
Wheeling, and probably anywhere else,
but the manufacturers have begun |
campaign Of education and are distrib-
utlng circulars, containing tributes to
the efficacy OF linen underwear as n
protection against colds and instanclng |
its use for years by natives OF Russian
provinces. a
"Twud be ireland furIver," explained
a HIbernIan laborer at one OF the mills |
last night, "if 1t was an lrishman |
handlin' the Shamrock. But may the
dlvil bate her. wild her English skipper |
an her Scotch crew."
MRS. HOLIDAYS FUNERAL
Occurs this Afternoon nt 3 O'Clock. |