Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1899-06-03
. s e i. 81 !
Lt[I.A s!.;Mll. !, 81. y NJ

the war in Cuba yet-t'hlcaGo IT'D
une.
Jennie-Herbie. il says here another
octogenarian's dead. what's an "c-
togenarian?
Herbie-WeH, | don't just know what
they are, but they must pc aWfully
sickly creatures. You never hear Of
EN- but they are dying CRIT Bits.
Miss Dreamier-When you stood on
the brink of Niagara ana looked INTO
the scething. surging, unfathomablc
depths below. did you not FEEL that you
would like to jump IN
Mr.. Tourier-No: | hadn't received
my hotel bill then.-(Ncw- York Week
~.
Where do you say you obtained this
important news"
From a close friend Of the Presi
dent"
1T is very strange that the close
friends Of the President keep their
mouths SO open. ''-tJudge.
Young Mother-Horrors. Here's an
account in the paper of a woman who
sold her baby for 10 cents. Young
Father (wcarily) Perhaps it was
teething.-New York Weekly.
Inspector-I noticethat in this photo
graph YOU are bald.
Home coming Amcrican-Yes. my
hair grew out while l was abroad.
Then | shall have to charge you the
special duty on European grown hair"
Life.
ryt, ~. fTts,
sonheak got home for dinner yet. Bird
get?
Bridget,-No mum.
II thought I heard him downstairs. HI
Sure that was the dog you heard
growlin', mum. -Yonkcrs Statesman.
Friend.-Oh. yes. He said you had
a voice like a foi,-horn
The Town Cricr greatly plcascdD-
Saycst thou 50? ! would that might
meet him to thank him for the compl-
mcnt.-PuCk.
Just think Of a man paying $1,000
for seat in the New York Stock by
change" exclaimed Mrs. Snaggs
Yes, added Mr.. SnaEgs: why doesn't
he buy seat in the United States
Senate while ne is al it?''-Pittsburg
Chronicle Telegraph
Him" said the editor. II guess iii
III maj error stand
What is up?" asked thc Impcrsonal
Voice
slug n mas made 1t read He laughs
pest VINO laughs least -Indianapo-
lis Journal
What IL their position Ill society"
asked the inuuisiiire GIN.
ciety?" asked the inquisitivc rirl.
We'll" answered Miss Cayenne. ~
should say they are betvixt and be-
tween 1hoy aren't exactly nobody
ana yet they aren't really anybody
washington star.
,,,et,,na, ..Ar..,,,,.. ,.,..,,,.,. ,....,,.. ~,
Tailor Not vi sir..
rretn,7ar NAM ,.,,, ...,i,, ,...,.
have them done if you worked an
night
Tailor Eyes: but | didn't work An
night "-CTit-Bits
4 HttI. how vri,ir,. =. co,,,o.i,i,,,, .,.
WI. .,..l,,.., ,t-. ..,t. ''''''' NH.
to describe the animal ana tu mention
what it is useful fur After deem re-
Election. ~ wrote: The zebra II I'LL.
4 horse, only striped 1T is chiotI,
used to Illustrate the letter Z'.-,rit
Bits
"A really rood ro1r ,I,v,,. ,,,,s+ ,,.,.
nerve"
And 50 must a really baJ rolf I'LL,
cr. II must take 4 lot IN nary. w r,I3,
when you don't know how -purI,
river vo,, Ana ,,it+nn '. Ni'''''r ias
FoIhv ..rbot 4.aa,,. ..,,
half u much u I'LL ','u"'t n't
II 'h' many pairs Of
Aunt tIar,,b ..>-1
conscientious man sbo,,1a 80,
be minister of I'LL oas.,,ai J, ''S' 'di'
Uncle Iobp .I -
eop,o l,irlI. - ~" forget
nat,f,,,an,. '''ii' uieE unite n
All;
"'SS rooillteS. Funny that you
u'' Sc' ho hoWers. ana | have so
1Iis. CO..
SEQ nv +Iorist W." N''"". lou
,,,,,., ). IT. IeluSed me any
u"uS' ihey cal DE Agnose a sue
ndgo IL I'LL. - out % my knoWl-
,lozo, ,,ati,,,,t, 81 IMAM half