The Lexington dispatch. [volume] (Lexington, South Carolina) 1870-1917, 1899-04-19
VOL. xxx.


do you do yourself?
TT mean what do you do for q
living here?
S.-Keep tavern and sell whisky.
T.-Well, I told you I wanted
some whisky.
S.-Stranger, I bought a bari
morn week ago. You see, me and
Sal went shares. After We got it
here, We only had bit tween US,
and Sal she didn't want to use hern
fust, nor me mine. You see had a
spiggen in one end, and she in t'other.
So she takes drink out'n my end,
and pays me the bit for it; when
I'd take one out'n hern and giver her
the bit. Well, we's getting along
fustrate, till Dick, burned skulkin
skunk, he bored hole in the bottom
to suck at, and the next time I went
to buy a drink, they warn't none
thar.
TIN. sorry your whisky's all
ou'; but, my friend, why don't you
play the balance of that tune?
SITS got no balance to it.
TT mean you don't play the
whole of it.
s-stranger, can you play the
fddule
T-Yes, a little, sometimes.
S-You\don't look like a fddlur,
but eff you can play any more onto
that thar tune, you kin just try it.
The traveller takes the fiddle and
plays the whole of it,
S.-Stranger, tuck half duZen
cheers and sot down. Sal, stir yer.
self round like a six-horse team in 8
mud hole. Go round in the boiler
whur I killed that buck this mornin' :,
cut eff some of the best pieces, and
fotch it and cook it for me and this
gentleman, directly. Raise up the
board under the head of the bed, and
git the old black Jug hid from Dick
and gin US some whisky; I know
thar is some left yit. Til, drive Old
Bose out'n the bread tray, and climb
up in the loft, git the rag that's got
the sugar tied in it. Dick, carry the
gentleman's horse round under the
shed, and give him some fodder and
corn; much as he kin eat.
dad, they amt knives enuff
for to sot the table.
S.-Wha's big butch, little butch,
the case, cob-handle, granny's knife,
and the one I handled yesterday?
That's mug to sot any gentleman's
table, thout'n your lost um. Durn
me stranger, eff you can't stay as long
as you please, and I'll give you
plenty to eat and drunk. Will you
have coffee for supper?
T-Yes, sir.
S-I'll be hanged if you do, tho.
we don't have nothin' that way here
but Grub Hyson, and I reckon it's
mighty good with sweetenin'. Play
away, stranger, you kin sleep on the
dry spot tonight.
T.-(After two hours fddling.>>
My friend, can't you tell me about
the road I'm to travel tomorrow?
S-To-morrow! Stranger, you
won't git out'n these diggin's for six
weeks! But when it gifts so you can
start, you see that big sloo over thar?
Well, you have to git eros that, then
you take the road up the bank, ard
in about mile you'll come to two
acre and a half corn patch. The corn
is mitily in the weeds, bat you need
MT mind that; just ride on. About
a mile and half or two miles from
thar, you'll cum to the dampest
you ever struck in all your travels;
its boggy euuff to mire a saddle
blanket. Thar's a fust-rate road
about six feet under thar.
T.-How am I to get at it!
S.-You can't git at it nary time
till the weather stiffens down sum.
Well, about a mile beyaat, you come
to place where there's no road.
You can take the right hand ef you
want tc; you'll foler it mile or 30,
and you'll find it's run out; you'll
then have to come back and try the
left; when you git about two miles
on that you may know your wrong,
fur they amt any road thar. You'll
then think yon're nifty lucky e. you
can fud the way back to my house,
vhar you can cum and play on that
ar tune as long as you please.
1 was reading an advertisement Of
Chamhe,1ain's Collie. Cholera and