The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1899-06-29

THE POT FUCKERS HEARD THE ADVANCING
MUSIC WITH oUAKING HEARTS.
good enough fer the Gap They're goin
to have a band from Frisco, 90 pieces at
$3.50 fer the day. Talk about the valley
band! Why, it wouldn't draw handful
of picnickers if the woods was full Of
'em this Fourth''
"That's the worst deal they've give us,
'ceptin the picnic May day two year ago, I"
groaned johnson, as the stage ratified away
and he went inside to sort the mail. II
Lets go down and shoot up the
town. said Ike Bledsoe, suddenly afous-
ed by the clatter of the stagecoach from
hisbnapsen one of. johnson g benches.
"I'm peaceable man, but there's some
offenses that calls fer gun play exclusive,
and if I'm any jedge, Teller citizens, this
here's one of 'em; to be done up right and
left by an upstart Of town that every.
body knows wasn't nothin better'n q sub
urb to Pot Luck few yeafAago'-
"Wait till read you this, boys, |" broke
in johnson, bouncing out Of his Office
with a letter in his hand. "Bein chairman
of the Fourth of July ,committee,sI took
the liberty to open it. Now listen:
'To the Honorable Chairman and Members
Of the Fourth Of July Committee and Teller
Citizens Of Pot Luck in General. Greeting:
.'Surmisin that you don't intend 20 celebrate
this year and KNOWN the patriotic sentiments
Of your citizens, we extend you cordial invi.
tation to come down and picnic with us. !,
TIE FOURTH OF JuLr CoAafrrzzs or Durca
aP.. s.-Dons trouble J: yourselves 10 br.ns
lunch baskets; we'll have aood nude and
plenty to eat and drink. and # &oa't cost you
Q cent t'a5..5.s..ss5g. 81
Now then, that's polite iny,tas.on
enough" said johnson, with ~ Wink 81
Easy Bill. Whats the matter Fath 'cepe--
in itfra 80 lsg,qa. .
! i" 'Ceptin itr' roared Ike. II never fell
more like shootin friend than do like
pluggin you this minute, johnson, lei
swallowin an insult like that. Come on,
fellers. I'm peaceable citisen, ,but I'm
goin down to interview that Fourth 1oi
July committee at the Gap, and II there d
man in Pot Luck that packs gun and
won't foller me he's coward, and can
Lick him."
.'Oh, hold on, Ike" said johnson;
"idon't be goin of half cooked as you're
always doin- This here invites all Josh,
i 1thfn but bluff They don't mean a
sTord of it any more'n they expect us to
'cept it But look a-here, boys Can't
you see they've dealt us the very cards we
need to beat 'em, at their own camel
What's the matter with our 'ceptin this
invite and raisin the biggest crowd Pot
Luck ever seen and goin down there and
monopolizin that $3.50 dance music and
wipin all their eatables and drinkables of
the face of the yearthp'
'Ceptin Johnson S dignity as postmaster
ana justiee of the peace of Pot Luck, never
known to be ruffled before, proved un-
equal to the strain of SO extraordinary an
occasion. He fairly screamed out the final
words, emphasizing them with q swipe OF
his big felt hat across the top Of q bench,
illustrative Of the clean sweep he proposed
making of the viands of the luckiess pic
ntckers as the Gap His kmasterly dipIo-
macy was at once recSgnized by shouts
and cheers of approval, in which the
voices of Ike Bledsoe and Easy Bill sound.
ed Ioudest and longest. Pot Luck was
ready to act as one man. .Johnson's
strategy, BIDS executive ability and Ike,s
Sratry had been the brilliant features Of