The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1899-01-18

lOTe--- GeTSOndl NOJeS'
Special to the Scranton Tribune.
Susquchanna. January 17.-Visionary
and hopeful Bre'r Haines, of the
Honesdalc Independent. has dropped
wicked Matt Quay long enough to in
dulEc i'm n railroad day dream Hear
him.
"If--that Is small word but often
means a great dcal-the Erie should
build u short line from Greenwood lake
go Port Jorvis continue its Honesdale
branch oyer the gravity. tunnel the
Nluusic mountain above Wavmart and
connect with its jefferson branch at
Forest City it would have a route be-
tween New York ana Buffalo eighty
miles shorter than the New York Cen
trail.
Thr shops at Port Jervis and Susqu"-
hanna Would hc removed to this place,
all through trains would stop here and
goats would find green pastures i'm the
streets of deserted railroad towns
lIv th' same system of reasoning,
"if' tic goats which now browse in
the business streets of staid old Homes
'gir-5ut. oh dear!
IN 'IItiER Slljl. ''f l.lf -.
The young man who died because
his helit VAS ON the right side. must
have been in love.
The man who shoots his girl to make
her love him. and the girl who throws
ViUul in her lovers face for the same
reason. should marry ana have it out
with one another.
The individual who has dominion
over himself is very great, but even
he cannot always control his youngest
child.
Th" wise man prefers the newspaper
to tn" sheriff aN an auCtioncer and
makes money Ivy carrying the precept
into practice
Suicide Is seldom iustinabe ana al
ways more or less cuwardly. There are
sometimes mitigating circumstance
for instance. when man has to eat
hash every day for breakfast and sup
per
SUSQUEHANNA COUNTY CHIPS.
Some Of the Montrosa church So
cieties uurrose making matters un-
pleasant for the Mormon elders now
operating in that borough and vicin-
age.
Mitchell house in Hallstead. has sus-
tanned a second and severe stroke of
paralysis
There are eight empty business places
in Harstead. and the Herald calls for
a new deal.
The Past Sachem's Association. I'M
proved order Red Men. Of Susquehan-
ma county. will hold it's next meeting
n
W. j Chappelle. the Well-known
theatrical agent, is preparing to estab-
lsh the "Kc!stone Booking Bureau"
i'm Great Bend.
The Susquphanna County Medical
Pension Examining Board met i'm this
place ON Wednesday last.
David Michael. of South Gibson. q
well-knoWn pension attorney. and Il
crippled veteran Of the civil war, is a
Republican candidate for register and
recorder of the county. He has excell-
out claims for the position.
IN \ FEW LINES.
If the Delaware Il Hudson company
viii kindly give the Horesdale news
papers a few reliable railroad tins,
long suffering public will really be
much obliged
Every other man YOU meet has a
sure cure for the grip, and every other
man has the grip. The grip is no joke
y divorce costs more than a mar
riago. It is worth all the extra eX-
pensc, because it is supposed to last
longer
rs thore such a thing as luck? asks
an exchange. There is. For instance. IL
YOU 80 home at o'clock in the morn
ing, after promising your wife to be in
carly, and ind her asleep, and don't
fan over any chairs-that'S luck But
ii isn't to Ice depended on.
Vicinity hunters are staying large
number of foxes this season. The Wild
cat crop is up to the average Now
that the county commissioners no
'onGcr pay IA scalp bounty. wildcats will
feel safe".
There is money in poultry" Up at
East Meredith it Isl reported that gold
was found in the gizzard of several
ducks, and the owner of the ducks has
commenced prospecting upon his farm.
\ Nestal woman hid $lt7 in a Chim-
ney for safe Keeping. Her husband un-
oNpectodly started fire in the parlor
"tnYe-and there were uaruX-- and
swear words later ON. Moral?
The Susquehanna county delegation
tn the hlondike country made money
when they came home. one of them
said that when he arrived at Dawson
half frozen. wholly sick and discon
solate, and nearly dead broke--he
never before realized what good place
home was for a blankety blank fool.
HOME HAPPENINGS.
\ big delegation Of . Susuuehanna
sports witnessed the Hurley PAYNE
mill in Scranton on Monday evening.
Miss Elizabeth Ely, formerly and for
many years of Binghamton, died on
Saturday evening at the residence of
William Il. LYONS, in this place. aged
SO years. The remains were taken 10
New Belin \. Y, on Tuesday, for in
terment.
Peter Potter died in Oakland town
ship on Saturday aged so years
The Susquehanna shirt factory is ex-