Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1899-04-20
HIT AND MISS


Well. to our mind life is the best
thing in the world. at least that is the
way we feel at the present writing.
Life IS the reward which follows birth;
it is Gods object and promise; it IS
the existence in which we prepare for
a condition of happy or unhappy i'm
mortality; it is the growth we are
foolish to neglect. II is the riil that
widens to a rivulet-to rlyer-to an
ocean. 1t is the process by which TIE
soul grows and ripens; it Is the ia
eob's ladder up which we climb to
mansions in the skies. Life is the
sweetest thing on earth if we keep it
so; it is the time to plant flowers to
blossom in Heaven. 1t is the reward
that follows a good life il we take
care not to load it with those intiu-
ences which weigh down bad life.
Life 1t is a prisoner today but to-
morrow it will be free, and once be-
yond the door of death will be spirit
power of ripened immortality Foley
of the Index.
Here is sample of the Jokes the
experimentation villagers get
off on their country cousins who out
voted them on the railroad questions:
Zone of the fellows from the edge OF
the clearing who hadn't been to town
for two or three years took in the
sights election day and after study
ing the telephone wires for about tif-
teen minutes exclaimed in a mystitied
way, Seems to me they put their
wire fences COL darn high here in
town. > Wonder if he is any rela-
ton to the scientifically inclined Nor
NAL student of the Platteville school
who in explaining to his parents the
benefits of the Platteville waterworks
declared that analysis of well water
about the city had shown it to be so
full of acr0bats that it was entirely un-
tit for use? 1t is a Boscobel genius
who voted against the electric light
because it would be such a job to
climb the poles every evening to light
the electric street lamps.
Fewer wives would sit lonesomely
and disconsolately at home, while
their husbands roam elsewhere in
search of entertainment, if more wives
realized that home should be some-
thing more than a clean place to eat
and sleep in. Men hate women's
tea parties and large show functions,
but they like little dinner and supper
parties. Many families refrain from
entertaining because they cannot do
so on an expensive scale. 1t is, how
ever, possible to give small dinners
and suppers that are both enjoyable
and inexpensive. Ask people who
either do or will like each other and
if YOU wish the women to have good
time have just as many men guests
as women guests. If the men are to
have good time make sure that
some of the women are pretty and
fiattering. Men like to be flattered.
Oh. yes, they do.-EX.
Beetown against the world for fun
and frolic, for wit and wisdom, for
generous hospitality and never-failing
cheerfulness. Probably more smart
men have been born and reared IN and
about Beetown than any other town
in the county. CThe ''Smart:Alecks"
occasionally found down there now
are not natives; they have moved in
from somewhere else.) Beetown's
hills are as full of tradition and ro-
nance as the eyes of her lovely maid
ems are of love and laughter. If they
could only talk, the hills we mean,
what stories they could tell! But it
is not of Beetown that was, but Bee
town that is, that we started to speak.
Some folks think Beetown is dead.
just run against it if you think so.
You'll find you're ''next the real
thing" They do things in Beetown
that are done no where else Things
are funny there that are funny no
where else They have fun even in
so little matter as selling eggs down
there. For instance, Jones took a
basket OF eggs to town one cold day
last winter when "eggs was eggs"
and offered them for sale at Slimkins'
store. Slimkins said, Look around a
little and if you can't GET more III
give vou % cents That's enough"
said Jones, Il won't look around.
Pretty soon Jones went down to jim
kins' and found that he could have
gotten 80 cents a dozen for his eggs
there. Then he was mad and watched
in front of Slimkins' store TO send peo-
pie with eggs down to Jimkins' store.
Slimkins to get even then raised on
eggs. went to the woodshed, tore off
4 "a
painted in bold relief eggs 81 cents.
Jimkins had his war paint mixing by
this time being legged on by Jones,
and stuck out single eggs b
cents" Maybe You know what it