The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1899-04-15
hMiss Rosie. F"

We called her Mrs Meadows, but the
servants called her Miss Rosie" just as
| though she had been down in Kentucky
instead of in New York, and keeping a
| clearinghouse in New York at that Not
that she ever thought of it as boarding
house, however.
Were all one family" she used to say.
They're nothin' but reel quality in my
family; that's how It's they can be like
reel family
1t is likely that she had better board
ing house with less trouble than any one
| ever had before. She seemed to have
an endless supply of colored servants
| servants of the family in Kentucky-al-
ways one waiting TO take the other s
place.
In the beginning of the season mis-
Rosie" calls the staff together and makes
the following speech:
Now, you all know you got a good
place. where nobody'u worry you. can't
| keep lookin' after you, snoopin' round all
| day-my health won't permit it. Now,
| If hear any complaint o. you work I'll
bounce you all without ten minutes no
| tice. Addie an Georgia's ready to take
you place right off, This speech is de-
! livered from the depths of a big easy
]
dressed in a white plush wrapper liued
with pink silk. She says it in the slowest
| and most Indifferent of Southern draws,
| while she shifts absently at a bottle OF
violet extract. This ends all of Mis- Ro-
sizes housekeeping for the year, save
| that, true to her promise, she 'bounces"
Agnes, and Addie takes her place.
Here you have the keynote of Mis-
Rosie's" character wonderful. far
reaching laziness. There never was any
one in the world quite so lazy. 1t was
not an ostentatious lazness. It was too
| deep-rooted for that. Miss Rosie" never
! gave moments thought as to how to
save herself trouble. 1t came instructive
! ly to her. She put her business on other
| peoples shoulders in way that
amounted to genius. Her shiftless brother
! in-law was spurred on to keep the books.
| How Mrs. Meadows induced him TO. no
| one ever knew, certainly by some method
| that gave her no trouble. The servants
kept the house. Mis- Rosie" limited her
| efforts to designing dresses-the dress
maker came to the house to try them on
| A gullible friend, who really believed in
! Mis- Rosie's" health, went to the stores
for samples and went again to order what
Mis- Rosie had selected
After mis- Rosie's" vast repose, her
most noticeable characteristic was her
| evasiveness. Now and again unkind
boarders called 1t lying. But evasiveness
has its uses. For instance, there was al
| most no gossip in Mis- Rosie's" family"
Now a clearinghouse where there is no
gossip is positively abnormal
DO tell me how you manage it, Mrs.
Meadows" asked a curious boarder
Mis- Rosie looked out between half
Mis- Powers, 1 don't never know
| nothin'"
This was all very well, as far as gossip
was concerned, but it extended to ognor-
ance of every detail of her house.
You amt got but one blanket on your
bed? Now, 1 am surprised. Amt it too
bad, now,' she would say, soothingly, but
not blanket would be forthcoming.
1t was miraculous how all the unpleas-
ant affairs Of life slipped off her mind
She had nose" for trouble, and would
find some errand to take her away from
home whenever a storm threatened, and
away she would remain until all was Sc
rene again. She would remark benevolent
ly at dinner time: Now, I do hope you
all got sumpin' to eat at lunch. Addie
an Agnes was rowin'-I don't never inter-
tere with the qua'ls of ma servants-ma'
health don't permit it. Only sometimes
Addie, she won't cook a stitch when she's
mad-but I do hope you got sumpin'"
In spite Of such outbursts of plaintive
childishness Mis- Rosie was guile Itself
Not misunderstanding guile-for that she
was too sluggish. 1t was more Elusive
ness than anything else. Anything on
earth boarder asked for was always just
about to be purchased. She was so suave
that she made one almost believe that
1t was already there. After all, it was
ones own faul if one was fooled, for her
duplicity was so obvious.
AFTER ALL" the wise boarder remon-
strated, when you know a person always
lies they are quite as reliable as though
they always told the truth" And the New
England woman who had staid three in
dignant years IN mis- Rose's" boarding.
house because it was clean and the food
good, snorted derisevely.
But genius is never really appreciated
so Mis- Rosie's'' chef d'oeuvre was her
undoing. With the disreputable brother
1n-law who kept the accounts. she went
down to her summer place ito get 1t in
order" she said 'TWalter," poor man,
was the one who would do all the work,
while Mis- Rosie" would have a rest
walter however, came home before
Mis- Rosie'-came home drunk. and was
taken with delirium tremens. The board
ers took care of him. Mis- Rosie" was
written and telegraphed to. After all the
trouble was over she appeared
I saw poor Walter was goin' to have
a SPELL she said plaintlvely. so I staid
jes' where l was. My health won't permit
me to stand such COINS on. He was les
dredful, wasn't he, now? I knew some o.
you would jes naturally take care Of
him"
This angered even the wise boarder, and
Mis- Rosie's" select clearinghouse now
bears the sign: ITO Let"-New York
| commercial Advertiser.