Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1899-06-09

Colonel McSeery Makes Call on the
Lady Managers of the Worlds Fair
and Is Highly Edited by Their Dis
cussions.
Before that clever satirist Mr.. Fin
ley Peter Dunno wrote the ''Mr. Doo-
ley" sketches he created character
known TO Chicago fame as Colonel Nc
Merry. The May Bookman, in an inter
esting article by w. Irving Way, quotes
one of the Colonel McNeery sketches as
follows: The title of the sketch is In
Woman Stare, in which Colonel Nc.
Merry makes a call on the lady man
ayers of the Worlds fair 1t concludes
with dispute between the 'Naypol-
tan ice cream wonan and the 'toOty
frooty lady manager
Thin Mrs. Potther Pammer says,
Girls, says she, come to ordher,' she
says. There do be business iv impor-
tance to thransact.' An with that
poor, lone man climbs on tn platform.
He do be tn guy they've sint out fir m
Wash n ton for to steer tn girls right
on parlymeenthry law, an he looks as
woorid an ongweed, as Tiddy says, as
polissman in pianny concert.
They've no more than set in than an IL
ligant lukin woman she stands up an
says she, Ladies, she says. Il moves
we has Naypoltan ice crane at tn
loonch-on.' Pint iv order, says gray
haired old lady. Pint iv order says
she. 'Shtate ye'er pint iv order says
Mrs. Pammer, says she. 'Th' pint iv
order, says the gray haired lady, 'th'
pint iv order, says she, SIS that tn
lady is not ia akin to tn question:
she says. we a-are here to discuss
she says, for why shud not wimmen
take their proper Stare, says she. AN,
besides. says she, 'tooty frooty have
been ordhered already 'Th' pint is
well taken, says Mrs. Pammer. 1T is
not, says tn first lady. 4 want for to
say that Naypoltan ice crane shud be
ordered, she says, for tn loonch-on
an nothin the old shkate'-no, by gar,
she didn't say that, Jawn-'th' old
lady, she says, that shpoke last, says
she, cant make me set down, says
she. Whose old7' says tn old lady.
'Ye mink, says she. 'Ye'er dishturb-
er iv tn peace, she says. Set down.
says all tn ladies that do be on tn
side iv TIL Naypoltan ice crane lady,
an 'Thrun her out, says all them that's
with tn lady with the white hair.
Ladies' says Mrs. Pammer. 'Ordher,'
she says, wallopin tn table with fan.
will ye set DOWN. says tn white
haired wan. 'Niver, says tn Naypol-
tan ice crane wan, til 1 gets me
rights, an whin gets home, she says,
I'll be tillin NE husband-boo hoo
says she, cryin, what a horrid way I've
been threated.
''Thin tn other wan, she begins to
weep, an then all tn pa-artizans iv tn
Naypoltan lady an tn white haired
tooty frooty lady they hollers, too, an
Mrs. Pammer, she consults with tn
man firm Wash n ton an thin she raps
with her fan an says, Ladies' says
she, Get us be friends, she says. Will
ye both accipt an amendment for to
have both Naypoitan an tooty frooty on
tn tableT we will, says they both in
wan breath. Thin, says Mrs. Pam
mer, tis SO ordered. Thin up jumps
little woman, an she says, says she,
4 moves, she says, that we gives tn
hankchef saloot, she says, 'to our prisi-
dent, she says, 'f'r her able manner,
she says, 'iv maxim tn white winged
angel iv peace shpread his wings, she
says, 'over the scene, says she. An thin
l goes cut
One Umbrella Less.
Mr.. Spinks-Why, under heavens,
did You give Ellington that cotton UNI
brella He'll never bring it back.
Mrs. Spinks-The only other one in
the rack was silk
"You should have given him that.
"Humph! If he wouldn't return the
cotton one, why should he return the
silk onef Tell me- that Mr. SDinks "