The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1899-06-15

wrote little Lucy, who was away on a
visit. but | have been eating onions. y
As the course OF true love never runs
smooth, ii Is supposed that there will
always be plenty Of friction matches
Ia the world.
Porter. can | take this train on to
Liverpool:" well. you can hey a try
miss; but In gen'ral we uses the In.
lnn."-.illy Sloper.
She-I hope yen can come next
Thursday. We're having some music,
and a supper after. He-Oh. yes, IN
come; but-er-I may be late!
why Is this called Lentg see
Tommy Tucker has raised his hand.
Why is it. Tommy "'Cause It's too
hard to keep."-ChicagO Tribune.
The Idler-What became OF that cat.
tie car you invented? The Inyentor-I
couldn't get the railroads to take any
stock in it.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
Papa" said Benny Bloobumper.
why are days OF grace allowed ON a
noteT To avoid weeks Of disgrace"
replied Mr.. BlOobumper-Judge.
George-Do you think that your faith
er win consent 20 our marriage. dar-
lingF Ethel-Oh. yes. He has always
humored my siIliest wishes.-Brooklyn
Life.
Alistress.M MARY. how was it l saw
you treating your friends to my cake
and fruit? Mary-I cant tell, ma am.
for the loife OF me, for I'm shure | COW
cred the keyhole.
"Jane. did you break the china
plateY" "Yes'm. You got fooled on
that plate, mum. It's a weak un. Ii
broke the fourth time | dropped it,
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
How do you do, Miss Leslie? So
awfully glad TO see you again. So very
sorry you wern't at Lady Browns
dance last night There positively was
not one pretty girl In the room" Il
am not Miss Leslie. But was mt Lady
Browns dance last night"
Professor-Mr. Oar, this is an exam
pie in subtraction. Seven boys went
down to the river to battle, but two of
them had been told not TO 90 in the
water. Now. can you tell me how
many went in? Oar-Yes, sir; seven.
Michigan University Wrinkle.
BILLY, you have no use for your
classical education now that you are
married" "Well-youre away Off.
use my college yell on the baby every
night" ION your baby? What good
does that do?7 "Why. lots of good; it
makes him scream for his mother like
mad."-DetroIt Free Press.
Anxious Mamma-Yes, Mr.. Lakeside,
the fact is l have three daughters who
ought TO be settled In life. Is this West
srn friend of yours marrying man?
Mr.. Lakeside, of Chicago-Not to any
great extent, mum. I'm afraid he
wouldn't want to take more than one
Of 'em.-New York Weekly.
Its too bad" said discouraged
looking Spanish soldier, that we didn't
get those mules that were to be shipped
% u.s. what difference does that
maker I'D kind of like to go into
battle on a mule. They say a mule is
about as likely to go backward as he
IS to go forward. Washington Star.
No Escape-Mrs. Chlnner-Ernest-
ne, my darling, do you expect Con-
slant tonight? Ernestlne-Of course,
Why do you inquire? Mrs.
Chinner-If he asks you to marry him
tell him to come and speak to me. En-
IL he doesn't ask me
Mrs. Chinner-Tell him am coming to
speak to him..-Brooklyn Life.
Doctor-Your husband must have
rest. Wife, know 1t. talk
10 him seven or eight hours every day
SO as to keep his mind off of business.
second thought, madam, |
husband is to take him to the hospital,
with Instructions that no one but the
rained nurse and myself be admitted.
= Detroit Free Press.
Now, Bobble," said the teacher,
spell pipe" pipe" said Bobbie.
right. Now. tell me
about pipes. What do peo-
de do with them? "Well," said Bob
lie. 'some boys blow bubbles with
hem; plumbers put them in; Scotch
men blow music out of them; the Ger
mans make them; and my father
.mokes them, and break them. 1t all
depends ON the kind of pipes you want
ne TO tell you about" replied Robbie.
by the way" said the lady, do you
now that there are times when It Is
angerOus to enter an Episcopal
'hurch?' "What Is that, madam
aid the bishop, with great dignity,
frightening himself up in his chair.
| say there are times when 1t Is posi-
vely dangerous TO enter the church."
he replied. "That cannot be-" said the
shop; pray explain, madam why"
aid she, at is when there is canon
/ the reading-desk, big gun in the
ulpit, when the bishop is charging his
ergy, the choir is numbering the an
lem, and the organist Is trying 10
rown the choir."-Youth's Companion.
suDHOwers as Bean Poles.
q,l.o aaIaot;nu and outtin0 nf nolaa