Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1899-05-18
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smooth, 1t is supposed that ths,,
always be plenty OF friction md
In the world.
PORTER, can I take this tral,
Liverpool" "Well, you can he, /
miss; but in gen'ral We uses n
jinn."-Ally Sloper.
Shc--1 hope you can com.
Thursday. We're having some I
ana a supper after. He-Ob y.
come; but-er-I may be late,
"Why is this called Lent, /
Tommy Tucker has raised hi,
Why is it, Tommy:' "Causp \
hard to ep."-Chlcago TrIbu,,
The Idler-What became Of m,
tie car you Invented? The luy4t
couldn't get the railroads to al,
stock in it.-Cincinnasi EnquIp,
Papa" said Benny BlOOlu
"why are days of grace allOvs
note?" "To avoid weeks of dis
replied Mr.. Bloobumper.-Jud.e
George-Do you think that yOr.
er will consent to our marria,
ling? Ethel oh, yes. He bias /
hunlored my silliest wishes-Bn
Life.
Mistress-Mary, how was t
you treating your friends to M
and fruit? Mary-I can't tell ,
for the loife of me, for I'm shuN
cred the keyhole!
Jane, did you break The
plate?' "Yes'm. You got foi
that plate, mum. It's q weak
broke the fourth time | drOppsl
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
"IIow do you do, Miss LesN
awfully glad to see you again.
sorry you wern't at Lady b
dance last night. There positive
not one pretty girl in the room
am not Miss Leslie. But was d
Browns dance last night"
Professor-Mr. Oar, this Is 40
pie in subtraction. Seven bO!i
down to the river to battle, but
them had been told not to 90
water. Now. can you tell ne
many went in? Oar-Yes, SIR
Michigan University Wrinkle
BILLY, you have no use 10
classical education now that
married." "Wcll-you're away
use my college yell on the BABY
night" ION your baby! WIN
does that do?" "Why, lots oil
makes him scream for his mot
mad."-Detroit Free Press.
Anxious Mamma--Yes. Mr.. u
the fact is | have three dausnI
ought to be settled in life is 'i'
ern friend of yours 4 marr!lq
Mr.. Lakeside, of Chicaso-NSl
great extent, mum. ID III
wouldn't want to take more
of 'em.-New York Weekly.
Its too bad said a disco
looking Spanish soldier. that v
get those mules that were 10 Oe
to U.S." What difference 10
makc?" I'D kind Of like 10
battle on a mule. They say q
about as likely to go bacKwa'
is to 60 forward" -Washlngloa
No Escapc.-Mrs. Chinner-
inc, my darling, do you eAN
slant tonight? Ernestine-o'
mamma. Why do you lnqule
Chinner-If he asks you 10 lid
tell him to come and speak u
nestine-And if he doesn't asA
Mrs. Chinner-Tell him am "
! speak to him. Brooklyn Lie
Doctor-Your husband lnu,
complete rest. Wife, Kno"
to him seven or eight hours "
40 as to keep his mind OIL OF
Doctor-On second thought H
conclude that the one chance
husband is to take him 10 'ne
with instructions that no Que
trained nurse and myself pe ~
Detroit Free Press.
"Now, Bobbie," said the
spell pipe "P-i-p-e'" sla
Teacher-That's right. NOV,
something about pipes. Maa'
pie do with them? "Well' =, ~
bic. "some boys blow buo'l'
them; plumbers put them Ill.,
men blow music out OF t'ep.
mans make them; ana m ",
smokes them, and I break 'll' u,
depcnds on the kind of pipes
me to tell you about rep''eD
Officer Ito new servanu.M ri
have left my mess-boots ou' w., =,
ING. want them soled. fr"i
phy-very good, sor. om .,a.s
the day)-Did you take tl'1 ',s
Murphy? Private MURPHY y, n n
his pocket and putting Ou Nd &
eighteen-pence)-Yes,so r' a aarno
could get for them. Tine e, .V hsy
two shillings had it been pay
lapse of officer.)--Tit-bils'
"By the way" said the lao w
know that there are '''n ri
dangerous to enter a., u. nj
I,,L ~ U\Vhot Is Una"