davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR,
Man seeks; woman searches.


A mans hardest trial is preserving
faith in his wife's faith in his faith.
If men could be born widowers there
would never be any such a thing as a
widow.
The longer man stays single the
surer he is that some woman had a
lucky escape.
Some girls would appear better if
they could only manage to get away
from in front of themselves.
The time a man begins to love his
wife the hardest is about the time he
as he thought she did
When a girl who is visiting town
talks about the Conservatory at
home, you can be pretty sure that her
mother raises house plants in the bay
window.
If man took the trouble to find
out what n woman's favorite novel
was and then proposed like the hero
does, she probably could never help
accepting him.
Take away from the average woman's
mind what she thinks about the neigh
bors, and You will have left her religion
and what she thinks the neighbora
think about her.
No girl has any right to get married
till she knows nine ways 20 use up
stale bread and how to fold dress.
suit so when n man wants to wear it he
won't have pay a dollar to get the
wrinkles pressed out of it.-New York
Press.
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02
Begging a Parrots Pardon,

DR. Leonard Williams, who is anx-
ious to prescribe for those who are
out of sorts, sends us the following
story not absolutely new, but worth
repeating a humor test.
A parrot in remote country dis
trict, escaped from it, cage and settled
on the roof Of laborer's cottage.
When it had been there little time.
the laborer caught sight OF IL. He
had never seen such a thing before,
and after gazing in admiration at the
bird with its curious beak and beauti-
ful plumage ne fetched ladder and
climbed mp it with a view Of securing
so great q prize When his head
reached the level OF the top Ct the
roof the parrot tapped wing at him
and said, What dye wants Very
much taken aback, the laborer polite
~ touched his cap and replied, 'I beg
your pardon. Sir, ! thought you were
a bird London Chronicle.
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02

Nelson Mackold. Of Waukesha. has
lived since May, 1897, with two bull
lets in his brain, either one Of which.
so the doctors say, would have killed
anybody else.
On that date a horrible crime was
committed on n lonely farm near Wau-
kesha. a man named Pouch killed
Farmer Alexander Harris. put two
bullets into Mackold's head and left
him for dead. He then went to the
house and, after Mrs. Harris had
given him his breakfast. he shot her
and her daughter.
The hired man revived sufficiently
to crawl TO q neighbours house and
give the alarm. The whole country
was aroused and some days after the
murderer was found i'm q pond. where
he had shot and then drowned him.
self.
The grasp Of Mackold upon life wns
marvellous. All the doctors said he
would die, but instead he got we'll and
by the end Of tho summer was able 10
work about the farm In the interest
of science Mackold was taken TO Chi
cage and an X-ray photograph taken
of his brain. r. shows that one bullet
is lodged At tho base Of the brain.
right over the spinal column. and the
other rs in the roof of the orbit
Physicians say that, according to
every physical law, he must of neces.
sity die from tho effects Of the bullets
in their present position. Yet the
man lives, is strong and we'll, feels no
III effects from the bullets and is as
sane as he ever was.
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02

There is a Detroit family that ar
ranged to spend the cold season in the
B9rmudas, and due announcement of
the fact was made in the usual way.
An unforeseen event deferred the pro
posed trip and the pride of the good
wife did not permit of her acknowledge
ing change in the plan of campaign
as proclaimed to the world through
the newspapers. They would go later.
and meantime they would have it be-
lieved that they had already departed
All the servants but one were dis.
missed. The front of the house was
made to look as though the place were
closed, and temporary residence was
taken up in rear apartments. A friend
Of the family, who had just returned
to the city, called and was bent upon
letting the folks know that she was
back. Her persistent manipulation of
the bell led the servant to show her
beaming countenance through a crack
of the door.
''Is your mistress at home?"
She sid to till yez they air in the
Barmudiz."
90, away from homer"
"They air at home in the Barmudiz. &"
But they must have gone from
home in order to he so far away.
eff Yell wait I'll ask the misthress.
Shure / can't be ramimberin how it
is. at all, at ALL
The friend waited patiently; even
gaily.
ut WIS roight was all the tonne, q"
announced the faithful handmade.
The misthress is here in the Bar
mudiz. Would yez be Tavin' q
carrudY'-Detroit Free Press.
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02

Very few people realize at what ire.
mendous heights birds sometimes ira.
verse the air. Herons and wild ducks.
geese and swans. when travelling lou2
distances, fly at greater heights often
aa much as 1000 feet. But it is the
hawk, and more particularly the vul.
ture tribe, that constantly wing the
air at far greater limits than these.
The common buzzard spies for carrion
suspended q mile above the earth. and
She great condor of the Andes has
been watched through a powerful tel.
escope floating at the amazing height
Of 27,OOO feet, over five miles above
the sea level.
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02
The Managing Of cinnamon.

''Never make q BLUFF at a China.
man, said Mr. w. O. Frazer, Of New
York, at the Normandie.
81 lived among the celestials mum.
Der Of years, and think + have their
traits down rather fine. A Chinaman
has rather n contempt for an employer
who will treat him with gentleness: he
respects the one who administers a
kick. As ! said, bluffs don't 90 over
there; il you drew back your arm 10
strike the wearer Of a pig tail and fail
10 make good the threat, the chances
are that he would assault you. In that
respect they are q peculiar people.
One of the main reasons Of their favor.
ing Russia as against England is that
the British have pursued a policy that
seems weak and vacillating. The Mon.
golian admires the iron hand. -
Washington Post
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02

a young man, employed in book
bindery in Portland, while playing
ball about year ego, received an in
jury 60 one or his fingers, which. 10
all appearances, would be permanent.
and he never expected TO get relief.
But a few days ago he was 1T work m
the bookbindery when his finger was
crushed, and surgeon was summoned.
who, to his great surprise, found that
this second injury had completely
remedicd the original hurt, and he
was able 10 announce that when well
the finger would be perfectly normal
in shape. Portland Me- Transcript
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02
P,TH AND POINT.

III don't tell all L know, by a good
deal. - "No; nor you don't know all
you tell, either. Chicago Record
Does one ever fad himself able to
live up to his ideals?" 81 know
could if had the price. Indian
apolis Journal.
"Tm glad this coffee doesn't owe
me anything" said n boarder at the
breakfast table. Il don. believe it
would ever settle"
Mrs. Limberchin-'I was so mad
last night 1 couldn't speak" Mr.. L.
And | was away inst my luck"
Boston Transcript.
Tommy Mamma, tell me how long
cows should be inilked?" Mrs. Cityens
THE same as short ones. Tommy.
What foolish question"
There's new theory that music
makes people vicious" "No, it is
imitation music that makes people
vicious. Detroit Free Press.
Grocer" Half pound of tea?
Which will you have, black or green?"
Servants hure, ayther will do; it's
for an old woman that's nearly blind"
An alleged lawyer recently went to
battle in the sea and encountered q
large shark Their eyes met for an
instant, when the shark blushed aud
swan away.
Her mouth than honey sweeteris, trow:
Yet bitter words from hersweet lins hayo
sprung,
All, well VINO will In searcns Lev go
Must risk, forsooth, TIE chance OF being
stunG.
The Dear Girl-"This custom of
throwing rice at newly welded
couple is so idiotic." Tie Savage
achelor-"Well rather. Mush would
he much more appropriate. "-Cincin-
natl Enquirer
81 want a Turkish BATH" said the
patron. eyes, sir" politely replied
the new clerk, late of Joblotzs de-
partment store. "Will you take it
with you, or shall we send it?"-Phil-
adelphia Record
What" asked Sunday-school
teacher, sis that invisible power that
prevents the wicked man from sleep
ing and causes him to toss upon his
pillow" ''Skeeters" shouted the bad
boy at the foot of the class.
Dear Adolphus, said fashionable
belle, the other day, to her accepted
sutton, ''can You tell me the color of
the winds and waves" ooh, yes, for
have frequently seen il stated that
the winds blew and the waves rose"
Come where my love lies dreaming"
He started to sing, but she
Rushed over and cried to him, "Pshawl
You'll have 10 let up on your screamirCl
like IT all right, but you see
I'm afraid it'll waken paw"
Cleveland Leader.
Mr.. Kickum-'J have caught you
kissing my daughter, have l." Young
Mr.. SmaCkum-"I trust there is no
mistake about it, sir. The light is
none too bright, and ! should be vastly
disappointed if it should turn out that
was osculating with tie cook =
Wasp.
Please, sir, " said one Of the small
twins as they entered the grocery, "wo
want cents worth of beans. " ''What
do you want them for?" asked the
grocer. "Cause our mammals gene
out, and she told us not TO swallow
any beans while she was gone, and we
can't fiud any i'll the house was the
reply. Chicago News
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02
The LATEST CRAZE.

When man goes wildly rushing
UP and down the crowded street,
And his face looks sad and troubled,
And his clothes no more are neat,
You can bet he's got the fever
One Just now IL apt to meet;
And he's putting all his money
Into copper. pork or wheat.
When gay man seems in trouble
And smiles seldom light his face;
When with syllables no greets you,
And he seem5 quite out of place;
When his head Is bowed in sorrow,
And he wants to seek retreat,
You can bet he's lost some money
In copper. pork or wheat.
When you meet n man that's happy,
And hc takes you by the hand;
Who TALKS TO you in confidence,
And gives you to understand
That the game he now IL playing
Is ono that can't lie beat
You can bot that mans made money
Out Of copper. pork or wheat.
Washington Star.
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02

A lively little fox terrier owned by
q family uptown has developed n
strange habit In his afternoon
rombles now he stops before q grocery
store in front OF which, among other
thing7, there is usually an open box
Of table nuts Picking up two or three
nuts ir its mouth the dog runs away
with them TO it's masters house. n few
doors Oft There, stretching itself on
q rug in front Of the door. the dog
holds a nut between its paws, cracks
il With its teeth like q squirrel, and
eats 1t with relish, New York Sun.
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02

One Of the most interesting sights
around Paris is the mushroom caves.
which are nothing more or less than
tunnels containing at intervals of a
few feet small beds of fertilizer mixed
with virgin SOIL The caves where
mushrooms are grown are especially
prepared and great care and attention
are given to their keeping and perfect
preservation,
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02
FAREW ELL

FAREWELL What words OF mine NAV saw
What In my heart feel?
While on my heartstrings pain doth play,
And Fate's cold hand OF steel.
Unnoticed by tho world, we part;
Our souls may not reveal
The pain at which we fain would start
For on US rests a seal.
seal which only makes Love mute;
1t stiles not, nor dies,
But e'er awaits to touch it's lutte,
And breathe again its signs.
What cries of woe made you speak
o tell me you forgivei
We're days of yours by me made bleak
For SUMMER ones we'll live.
Unknown the bonds that us unite
Too strong for Fate to sever
Enduring through Times ceuseless eight
They hold us firm forever.
SO smile, then. when look tho word,
Tint silent, L must tell, -
AS TX some message sweet you've heard.
And not this sad farewell
M. Il. w.
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02
ADVERTISING aArrs.

Advertisements VIII b inserted a sas AellsA
per square tor the frss inssrtiea aaA Az
sene FOR each subsequent insertion
Local, Business and Special notices tsA
oenss lins, and no notice inserted fss u
thAn enc dollar.
Legal sdvsrtissnents will Be Inherited %
the rates allowed By law and will, In all eases
DO required upon delivery Of certified copy.
CnABon HoB AUTOBIOGRAPHY
oosnty sStcsrs, Soi State and Congress, $40.
Terms for standing advertisements made
suovn On application to the publisher.
jos PRINTING executed with neatness and
dtpassh. 4S~Ordsrs By mail vii receive
orS1aDt attsnsioa-
The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1899-05-02
THE ROMANCE OF
AN OLD MAID
BY GERTRUDE SCOTT DusKIy.

EMENIB r A n G. T.
brings back to me
a bunch of white
clover and grasses
tightly closped in
n dirty little fist,
a hot, perspiring
boyish face with
tears of weary
Joy trembling on
the lashes of the
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30
A Mother Tells How She Saved
Hex Little daughters Life.

/ am the mother of eight chill
dren and have had great deal Of
experience with medicines. Last
summer my little daughter had the
dysentery in its worst form We
thought she would die. tried
everything 1 could think Of, but
nothing seemed to do her any good.
I saw by an advertisement in our
paper that Chamberiain's Collie,
Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy was
highly recommended and sent and
got bottle at once. 1t proved to
be one of the very best medicines
we ever had in the house. 1t saved
my little daughters life. l am
anxious for every mother to know
what an excellent medicine IL is.
Had l known it at first it would
have saved me a great deal of anx-
iety and my little daughter much
suffering.-Yours truly. Mas. GEO.
F. BuRDIcK, Liberty, II l. For
sale by all DRUGGIsTs.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

1t is rumored that the negro who
murdered another negro at Sinner
last summer will soon be behind
the bars of the Halletsville Jail.
We refer to the man who shot the
husband of the woman with whom
he had become enamored -Hallets-
vile Herald.
This must be AL Hamilton who
killed Williams.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

We are reliably informed that the
Bohemian citizens of Lavaca county
have decided to form an organization
for the purpose Of securing unan-
unity of action in the next coun-
ty campaign. A meeting was held
at Moravia few days ago and the
foundation laid. With thorough
organization the Bohemians would
have considerable strength
etsville Herald.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30


SSN'SS1lA derstands that to put flowers
S~fAhaA@ rich in honey where the bee
can get them with least effort, means an
increase in the quantity and quality OF
1.-THE honey garilered in the hives.
It is on this principle that Dr. Pierce's
Golden Medical Discovery increases the
quantity and quality of the nutrition OF
the body. The ingredients OF this nedi-
cine are selected to furnish the blood
and stomach with the essential materials
for body building, in concentrated and
assiinilable form. They make the con-
,dtions under which the stomach and
organs of digestion and nutrition must
work, as easy as possible, and so reduce
strain and waste. AS the strength OF
the body is re-established disease is
thrown off. It is due to this fact that
persons with weak lungs, obstinate
cough, bronchitis, and other diseases,
which if neglected lead to consumption,
find complete cure by using Golden
Medical Discovery"
"Dr Iferce's Golden Medical Discovery IS the
best blood purifier that ever used " writes Mrs
NJ. Hartricls, Of Demster oswego Co, N. Y" It's
about three years since my health began to tail
Last September gave ont entirely with what
the physicians pronounced enlargement OF the
liver. NV back panied me all the time the doc
tor said must not ride in fact could not ride
nor walk, nor hardly sit stu eould not ne on
my right side. 1conneneed taking the Golden
Medical Discovery aud Pellets took them for
three months and still continue the Pellets l
will be glad II can say anything to help those
who are suffering" =,
The Peoples Common Sense Medical
Adviser, a book containing 1908 pages,
is given away by the author. Send III
one-cent stamps for expense OF mailing
oniy, for the edition in paper, or 81
stamps for the book bound i'll cloth.
Address DR.. r. V. Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

Two Internal machines have been
sent to M, Labor, the chief counsel
DOR Dreyfus. The course Of the
prosecution in this case shows it TO
he extremely rotten.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

The reduction of the cotton yield
"A per cent by the drouth is Il con-
Gervative estimate based on observ-
Ations made on Aug. 10. This is
one week later. The damage may
be safely put down today at 20 per
c.ut.-Galveston Tribune.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

MopE forgeries and more false
witnesses are turning up daily in
Dreyfus case.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

THE thirty-third regiment has at
INST completed its quota and have
begun drill and rifle practice.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

III. Nj. NELL estimates the Texas
cotton crop at 100000 bales, the
Galveston News at 100000 and
the Houston Post at 100000.
Which will you take ?
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

TIE weather bureau reports that
cotton has suffered serious damage
from drouth and that it is too late
tor rain to benefit the old cotton.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

CusRo is preparing to celebrate
nts TwentyGfth anniversary some
time in October.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

THE Fall River cotton mills are
preparing to form trust. 1t is
Eime the farmers were organizing
Cor self-protection.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

THE hot weather apparently
reached climax last week, the
thermometer reaching all the way
from 81 to l07 degrees in the shade.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

RIGHT on the heels Of the state
mcnt that Tom Reed would not
resign. but would remain in con-
gress and fight Mckinley on the
door of the house, comes the resig'
nation of the ex.speaker and its
acceptance by Governor Powers Of
Maine.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

WE HAVE to record another gin
accident this time at Marquee, in
l.eon county. Mr., Newton King
6las lost an arm and perhaps his life.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

TUE Houston Post gays: Gone
rof tho signs of the times is that
Barney Gibbs is keeping awiully
.nniet.N
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

JoHN RILEY, city marshal of LA
Grange, attempted to arrest Tom
lSatigan in Mosig's saloon one day
last week. Ratigan resisted and
Riley shot him four times, killing
linn instantly, Riley surrendered
to Sheriff Loessin and was released
ON Sc 600 bond.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

Sinner, Texas, Wednesday Aug. go
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

The creditors of WIN. d. Cleve-
land az Co., held meeting at
houston laet Friday, at which Mr..
Cleveland made Il proposition to
compromise his Indebtedness by
paging 50 cents on the dollar, one
half OF this to be paid in cash and
the balance in notes running from
eix months to three years, without
iiaterest. Another meeting will he
held on September Let when the
creditors will decide whether or mol
70 accept this proposition.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

Mr.. A. B. kerr of Flatonia, and
ron Tom Kerr of Muldoon, have
purchased stock ranch Of $4,000
acres. paying therefor $4,000. 1t
is said to be fine piece of property
Aud a bargain at the price paid.
Mr.. Kerr and son viii stock the
ianch with cattle.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

Entered at the Sinner, Texas, Post
office, Us second-class matter
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1899-08-30

5uLseribc for The GAzErrE.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1899-08-31
Sharnn.


Grace Wiley visited in Randolph this
week.
Miss Ruby S%paulding OF Royalton is
visiting friends in town.
Mrs. II. g. Allen went to Concord, NH,
Monday to visit her sisters.
A few from this place went on the
Sunday school excursion Tuesday.
A cottage prayer meeting was held with
j. j. Parker's family Monday night.
Mrs. A. G. Chillson and little Mildred
are spending a few weeks in Lynn, Mass.
Alice Preston and Maria Billings re.
turned from Manchester, n. H., last
week.
Rev. E. E. Grant exchanged puIpits
with Rev. II. n. Nichols OF Norwich last
Sunday.
W. L. Babcock ana wife OF Elk River.
Mimi, are visiting his sister, Mrs. judi
son Parker.
Misses Norma and Mildred Keyler re-
turned to their homes in Montclair, n. j.,
last Tuesday.
II. f. Preston has taken an extensive
lumber job OF the Fall Mountain paper
company in Pittsield and expects to
move his family there about the first of
October.
Schools in town commence Tuesday.
Sept. 9Th, with the following teachers
No. l, grammar, Jennie Warren; No. 2.
primary, Grace l.. Wiley; No. 3. Leda
Smith No. 5, Mamie A. Slack; No. s.
Anna Whitcomb; No. s, Celia NJ. Wynn:
No. IL, Maud Carpenter.
Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1899-08-31

Harry Buchanan OF Gaysville Is visiting
bis uncle, j. NJ. Angel.
j. ~. Angel was called to GsysvIlle last
week by the death OF his father.
Lima Price visited Der aunt, DR.. n. :
Marshall, Of Montpelier last week,
David ID. W Whitney OF Montpelier is Wis.
ting bis parents, Z. n. whitney aud wife.
Mrs. DR.. Everett and Miss Flossie Nc.
Adams OF Boston are guests At c. VI.
Ciarkis.
Levi renney Peck OF Kenova, W. Va.
visited his cousin, Mrs. Nathaniel Wheat.
ley, last week.
Road Commissioner lamson Is working
a force OF help, making a permanent road
through the village.
Il. v. Price was in Mortified last week
to have work done at the dental parl0rs u
DIR. Walter G.. Huntley.
Gilmore Lane, a former Brookheld boy,
now residing ia Brandon, called 90
friends here the irst Of the week.
r. V. Hassam came from Gaysyille with
about Is hands and will commences the
manufacture OF last blocks this week.
Mrs. J. A. Peabody and Mrs. Frances
Goodwin left for northern New York last
week, where they will spend several weeks
with friends.
Or. renney Hail Wheatley, a former
Brookheld boy, Is taking a rest from bis
professional lAbors In Brooklyn, y. "
and spending a short vacation with bis
parents, MIR. and Mrs. Nathaniel Wheat
ley. IL Is always a pleasure 10 extend the
hand OF welcome to the genial doctor.