The Worcester spy. [volume] (Worcester, Mass.) 1898-1904, 1899-02-26
"ESQUIRE. T"
The Title Makes a
Judge Angry.
LORD BERESFORD
Though Balfour Disowns
Him He is Making Cement,

4 see be tn pa-apers," said Mr.
Dooley of Chicago to his friend and
confdante. Mr.. Hennessy, the other
day, that Lord Charles Beresford is in
our mist, as Mr.. Hogan says"
An who TIL divvles' he?" asked Mr..
Hennessy..
He's Waterford man." said Mr.
Dooley. Il kriowed his father we'll
a markess by trade, and fine man.
Charles wint to say early, but he's
now in the plasterin' business-cement-
in the alliance in the United States an
England"
And then the versatile and philoso-
phic Mr.. Dooley proceeded to inform
his somewhat dense companion as to
the merits and dement's Of an Anglo
American alliance, closing his any
thing ut-clear-as-crystal explanation
with the reflection:
An it was thinkin of you, HINES
sey an tn likes iv you an Schwartz
meister an the likes ~ him, that we'd
one wondher if the 'liance got into a
war with Germany an some wan was
to start rough-an' tumble in Ireland
about Election time, wondher wud TIL
ciment hold!'
Whether ii would or not remains to
be seen. But if any man can mix politi-
cal cement that would hold against al
most any strain, that man is Lord
"a = lnc Auf.
| Mr.. Dooley's friend and who is now
| travelling across this continent, having
returned from China, whittier he was
sent as a sort of unofficial envoy to
help along the policy of the open
door"
Mr.. Balfour denied in the house of
commons the other night that Lord
Berestord was an official representa-
tive of, the English government in his
present mission. His gifted and versa
tile friend, Lord Charles Beresford.
had been In China and had made him
self very busy there. ("Hear! Heart"
and laughter) But the noble lord did
not represent the government in any
way. He had been Sent out by pure
~ commercial company, with a purely
commercial object" Be that as it
may, Lord Beresford is quietly doing
a lot of "cimint' making on his tour,
and there is no man more fitted for the
job than the same Lord Charles
There are few men in British public
life more popular than he; every Jack
Tar in the navy swears by him; he is
the darling of the drawing rooms of
Belgravia, and since he entered parlia-
ment, few years ago he has steadily
grown as political leader. In politics
| he is tory, or conservative but his
| toryism is so thoroughly democratic
! that he counts his admirers among his
political opponents quite as strong as
in the house Of his friends. He Is the
| Theodore Roosevelt of Great Britain.
Public scandal finds no shielder in
Beresford, and if there is to be a bold.
manly stand to be made in parliament
against any misdoings of his own par
ty, Beresford's voice is never hesitat-
ing or muffied. He belongs TO that
wholesale class of politicians who be-
lieve occasionally in talking right out
in open meeting, no matter If friends
be hurt as well as foes.
A fresh young man named Henry
S. Mathews, fruit dealer by calling,
was being examined in bankruptcy
proceedings recently in a London dis
trict court, by justice named Bacon
The judge was putting the witness
through vigorous course of sprouts
as to the management or mismanage-
ment of his business. and the tone and
bearing of the deponent We're nlonen-
tarily increasing his honor's indigna-
ton. The examination closed as fol-
lows.
Judge Bacon-Do you say you make
Ell 10 a week. and by your own admis-
sion you pay more than 9I00 a year
for house rent, as well as rates and
taxes, water and gas. What do you
pay for gas a year?
mt Al l.
not discuss that Gaughter)
Judge Bacon (sternly)-You had bet
ter not be impertinent and | intend to
know what your profits are. | do not
believe that your profits are only 25 per
cent Don't you see you have been
telling me stories?
His honor then proceeded to cross
hackle the defendant. and the court
finally decided not give him a dis
charge. AS the judge took up the pa
pers in the case, his glance alighted on
an envelope addressed to the defendant
What he read thereon made him mad
der than a March hare, for, turning to
the clerk, he asked:
why is this man described as es-
quire? H. r. Mathews, ESQ. Z? The
man is fruit dealer, and such de-
scription Is ridiculous"
Judge Bacon is mistaken in his loca-
ton. He ought to be a police justice
in Chicago. Mr.. Dooley, esquire, Of
that city would not want for another
subject for a month. 1t is too bad he
is 80 far removed from the jurisdiction
of the sage of Archey road.
Fighting Smith" as he was known
to his comrades in the Crimean war,
and one Of the survivors of the Bala-
clava charge of the Light brigade, died
last week in the st. Pancra6 work
house, London, and but for the gem
erosity Of private citizens, would have
been buried in pauper's grave. A
MIR. Roberts has interested himself in
finding out the rest of the survivors OF
the immortal 800, with a view to pro-
viding for their wants and saving them
from pauperism. He has already the
names Of q Balaclava men on his list,
all of whom he found in the different
work houses. He states the fund Is so
low that unless more subscriptions are
Forthcoming, the men Will have to go
back to the pauper institutions from
which he took them. Ten pounds
week $500 would keep the whole 81,
says Mr. Roberts, but even that sum
he finds IL difficult to raise And so,
he goes on to say, 1t looks as though
Fighting Smith" will not be the last
OF the heroes of whom the shameful
words can be said and written: He
rode with the Light brigade and died in
the work house"
All of which goes to show that mon
arches, as well as republics, are I'M
grateful
c. O'CONNELL CALVIN.