The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1899-06-28
The small Bows Day.


And thus the editor muses.: Why the
firecracker? Why, indeed, the strid-
ulous small boy. who. with ventilated
apparel, one suspender and unsandal-
ed feet. accompanies the firecracker in
its orbit OF flame? Why pop and fizz on
the Fourth more than any other? Why
then more than any other time doth
the small boy rage and grow insolent,
and touch off everything that hath
noise in it, from a paper torpedo to a
fish horn, and brighten horses and
get asleep on curbstones, and tear his
trousers and burn his eyebrows, and
do various other dreadful things for
which he has been called to account
ever since he came in vogue? What
relation has the firecrackef to the Dec
laration of Independence? Or what
the horse frightening, bowling small
boy? The one Is a Chinese invention
that has no earthly Specification be-
yond sputter and fizz; the other has
but a faint idea of what the Declare
ton he is trying TO glorify means. He
is, in truth. the most absolutely de-
pendent creature in nature.
Who started this combination OF
youth and saltpeter, of vocal hair
cloth and the limbs of the jumping
jack, of fire, fizzle and bang? 1t is
laid at John Adams door because he
said something about the ringing of
bells, the firing of cannon, etc. But
could he have taken the small boy in
to account when he said it, Did he
dream Of the annual nerve racking tu-
multi he was preparing for future gem
erations? Had he any idea that Fourth
of July celebrations would so generally
be carried on. or at least aggravated,
by small boys of extraordinary lung
power and never faltering energy I'M
possible! John Adams was noble
man, patriot a statesman. but he
was not in all things clairvOyant. He
could not look forward and see the
small boy of 1887 celebrating the
Fourth of July to the terror and peril
of his seniors. The toy pistol was not
in vogue in John Adams day. nor had
the frecracker obtained n foothOld on
American soil Dogs with explosives
tied to their tails entered not Mr..
Adams idea of celebrating. All these
have come in with other modern i'm
plements of torture until we now have
a day which powder and the small boy
claim for their own.
Noise and happiness. patriotic enthu-
siasm and Chinese crackers are con-
vertible terms. The small boy seiZes
the Fourth of July as his own. and
custom has handled ii over TO him 10
do as he pleases with it. He is so
afraid that somebody else will claim
even the smallest fraction of it that he
begins 10 take possession on the even
ing Of the Sd. He sits up all night in
order to "usher in the day with the
loudest racket he can produce. He
brings noises TO the front the moment
the midnight hour arrives. and from
that on until midnight comes again he
accompanies himself with fire, flame.
conclusion and reverberation. Little
he recks that his wind up is WEAKNESS,
blisters. mutilation of his body, and
trouble with his stomach. All those
things are for his elders 10 look after
and make right.
He has now had over a century of
this sort OF thing and shows no signs
Of getting tired of it. And the fire
cracker multiplies and grows upon MS
In the provincial towns ii is mtigated
by professions. oratiOns municipal de-
monstrations. lemonade. gingerbread
and spruce beer. But in the city the
frecracker RACES without mitigation.
These remarks the small boy will not
like. But the day will come when he
will admit the force of them. That
day will be when he has passed out OF
small bOyhood into what he now calls
"fogyism." otherwise full grown and
possibly middle aged citizenship. He
will then occasionally remark that AL
is vanity. aye. even glory and fire
crackers" And his sons will laugh in
their sleeves and speak to him as 1.-THE
old man." and decide that he has for
gotten his youth. The dew and fresh
ness of the dawn of life will be over
for him. and with him will 20 his
former close appreciation of Fourth of
July explosives. Sometimes he will
1 hear himself referred to as "Old Will
kins"-if wilkins is his name-and II
will give him a queer and not at al
pleasant sensation.
In view of all this we must bear pa
/ tiently with the small boy and his eX-
/ travagantly explosive patriotism. II
will have its end, like all earthly things
/ and in it's train will come no end of re-
sponsibilities. ambitions. grievances
and vexations, and the rheumatism
and mental dyspepsia; and-whC
knows?-perhaps we will occasionally
look on the small boy and his firecrack-
ers with envy.