davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
She Didn't Need Tn.

"Do you dance on your toes, Miss Quickwit?"
 Never, MT. Clumsy. Other people do 1t for me-"
 And he didn't know just what she meant until he tried to get another dance with her.-Colorado Springs Ga Zette.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
A Sufficient Income

What do you consider a sufficient 1ncome? earnestly asked one club woman across the table the other day.
 Always little more than you have" flashed back the fair philosopher, with a smile.-Tit-Bits
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

he Doesn't FeaIIy Think So. May-Doyou believe that man should be classed as an animal?
 Fay-Of course. Aren't the most of them perfect bugbears? s?-Philadelphia Bulletin.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Accustomed to It.

Van Gabbler-I see the fashion is coming in again for ladies to wear ear rings. 1 suppose now you'll need to have your ears bored.
 Miss Ennui-Pm used to that.-Tit- Bits.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Rabbit Hair Crockerv.

The hair of rabbits and other animals in Russia is converted into bowls. dishes and plates, which are valued for their strength, durability and Hghtness. The articles have the appearance of vanished leather.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Another Champion.

"What is that there medal, friendr asked the sociable barkeeper.
 'I win that" answered the man who was leaning against the bar, "fOr beat in everybody out by listenin' to piano for thlrty-eigbt hours. ."-Indianapolis Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

The great demand for labor in the West sharply defines the tramp's labor policy. He is willing to work farmer, but not work his field.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
he Wisdom of If.

When we reflect how often shirt waists ought to be washed, we perceive the wisdom of having the world three fourths water.-Detroit Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
For What He's Worth.

"Her fiance is English. He owns a number of old castles and such."
 Dear me, how can she marry a man whose fortune is in ruins Y'-Philadel- phia Bulletin.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Didn,t Like It That Way.

Reggy-Aw, Maud, to me you are veal gold
 Maud-Hold on, Reggy! The other day you said I was a ''brick." Now, l want you to understand that l am no gold brick.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

'I firmly believe" she said, "that woman should have the right to pro- pose"
 "Of course, if woman proposes he replied, "she would give an engage ment ring and other presents instead of receiving them"
 "On second thought" she answered, perhaps 1t would be better not to change existing conditions" s."-Philadel- phia Call
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Suggesting that the camera be used on mobs and lynching parties is not a bad one. It could not well help hay ing at least a negative effect
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Tax-dodging on the part of rich men also means that physically they are apt ts stOop pretty low.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Easy.

Billy-When dey pinched Jimmy dey foun' list of names marked: "WeH-tO- do citizens" What did dat mean?
 Micky-It meant dat dey wuz we'll to "do."
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

It is claimed that the Sultan of Sulu treats his wives we'll The main trou ble seems to be that it's such a whole sale treat
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Those people who bring great wealth back from the Klondike nearly always manage to get lost as soon as they ar rive at San Francisco or Seattle.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

What is France without crisis" would make a suitable inscription for an up-to-date wall motto over in Paris.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Larry-Ee say after tn foight at Fin nigan'S ye saw miny new faces?
 njhny-Yis; tn faces thot were tan }n' red before tn scrap were black an' blue.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

There Is Biblical proof of the fact that gloves have been worn 5000 years. The first mention of them is made in the book of Ruth.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

A tax of sixpence per head is levied
 on all passengers landed in the Isle
 of Man. It is collected from the steam ship companies carrying the passen- gers
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Perhaps the reason why women are not photographed in China is that they can't look pleasant with pinched feet.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

They call the Indian Poor To, but he sold over a million dollars worth of land to the government the other day.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Kept Busy Digging Cellars.

q aint only got but one objection to bein' moved about, house an all, by these 'ere cyclones" remarked the old veteran farmer.
 "What is thatT asked the Eastern tourist.
 "Why, I've got t dig a new cellar un- der my house about ever two months" Ohio State Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

It was probably invented by wifeless man.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
As She Understood.

Pearl-What are those colors you have over the mirror?
 Ruby-Those are the colors of our college boys.
 Pearl-Good gracious! Red and black boys2
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Shelf I were to die you would neV- CT get another wife like me.
 He-What makes you think I'd ever wan: another like youT'-Wasp.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Teacher-Now. Patsy. would it be proper to say, You can't learn me nothin'?
 Patsy-Yes'm.
 Teacher-Why?
 Patsy Cause you can't-Boston Traveller.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Every woman loves to think that she is as frail as a flower.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

The people of the United States con- sume 1S5, ,OO0.0 pounds of plug tobac- co every year-most of 1t borrowed.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

The finest, purest and most nutritious animal jelly known Is that made from elephants tusks.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
A Desirable Condition.

Hyde-I see where Funston's in fa- vOr of peace.
 Park-Why, certainly. He's mar ried, you knOW.-Kansas City Inde- pendent.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

In France yellow journalism has at tained its highest degree of success. And just leok at France!
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Not tha snace Writer,a Oninior

Not the Space Writer's Opinion. Johnny-Pa, what Is meant by "de- scriptive writing?"
 Pa-Descriptive writing. my son, Is that part of a book that is generally skipped.-Stray Stories.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

Good jobs are more plentiful than good men to fill them.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

The world owes every man the right to earn living.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Wheels of Leather

Railway wheels made of leather hay, been eXperimented with in France.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Anticipation.

"Rainy day skirt, is it? Must have been made in anticipation of a water spout"
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

If man is too fly he is apt to get into the soup.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Hitting the Air.

Stubb-Cleveland is a great place for strikes.
 Penn-Yes; their baseball team is re- SnnnSihla fnr most of tiln1n
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
Lethargic,

Stubb-Are the people of this .own healthy?
 Penn-Wel, half the time they're in
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
A Question in Geogruphy,
hlnged Color,

pay IGdOu6I, W HtIG uIU IUUI CUI HtI D of the earth that they talk aboutT- Polichinelle.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

The sun dial is one of the old-timers
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11
mother View of the Matte,

Stubb-Ill? Penn-NO, sleep.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-11-11

NIlCkN ''do. 1"
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

Missouri, New York and other
states have recently established
chairs of journalism at their state
universities and Minnesota should
not be behind other states. journal
ists' make no better newspaper men
at first than law students make law
yers. but the enormous hold which
the weekly magazines are getting on
the people is simply due to the fact
that they are filling public need
which naturally belongs to the local
editor. Too much attention is given
in the editorial columns to politics;
in which there is no more reason than
there would be in country doctor
combining his practice to cases of lock-
Jaw. This lopsidedness ia the pro-
fession could be remedied and the
standard of the profession raised by
work receiving it's proper
recognition at our professional
schools.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03


The wise thing has finally Ebeen
done in Cuba, and the government is
fast paying off the soldiers who come
forward and deliver their guns. The
disgruntled leaders will soon find
themselves with only handful of
men, and as these men realize that
Uncle Sam intends no i'll will toward
them, they too will take up peaceful
pursuits and the fear of trouble with
the Cuban army will be thing of
the past.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

The currency plan as formulated
by the House Caucus committee is to
include three principal points:-the
redemption of the greenbacks in gold
and their reissue only when paid for
with gold, the allowing of national
banks to issue notes to the par value
Of the United States bonds held by
them, and the lowering of the capital
cation of national banks from $4,000
o $4,000. There can be no obiec-
ion to any Of these points, but it is a
question whether the plans goes far
'nough. The Senate committee will
meet in New York June 6, to review
he proposed remedies
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

THE South Carolina Congressional
delegation has been urging the post
flee department to reopen the post
flee at Lake City, S. c., which was
tosed after the brutal killing of the
olored postmaster, but Postmaster
teneral Smith has not decided to
;cede to their request, but has sent
special agent there to look over
nngs and to report whether the
flee should be re-established. Inas-
'uch as jury, made up from that
immunity refused to convict men
40 we're clearly proven to have
.rticipated in the killing of the
stmaster, itwould not he surprising
! ould the Department decide to
/. Nv the post Office to remain closed
q; a while longer, as reminder of
he crime committed there.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

The Dewey home fund has now
reached something over $1,000,
which is not as much as was expected
Criticism of the plan is, we believe,
out of place, for there are plenty of
people in the United States ready to
contribute to the fund and there is
no good reason why they should not
be permitted to do so and credited
for their generosity.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

DID you ever think of it that the
United States has repeatedly grown
at the expense of the Latin and Span
ish people. Louisiana was purchased
from France, Florida from Spain, the
Pacific coast from Mexico and now
Porto Rico aud the Philippines from
Spain. Yet from the rich valleys
where the hardy, industrious Northern
peoples founded the original United
States, the adventures of the domi-
nant CASTLE turned in disgust.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03
REAR ADrIIRAL JOHN c. WATSON.

REAR ADrIIRAL JOHN c. WATSON.
The return of Admiral Dewey is
looked forward to with much interest
and it seems his successor in COM
mand of the Asiatic Squadron has
already been named in the person of
Rear Admiral John Crittenden Wat
son. Admiral Watson has been an
efficient and respected officer in the
navy for many years,but he acquired
great prominence when, as a COM
modore, he had temporary command
of the Havana blockade and was re-
lieved to take command of the flying
squadron which was preparing
to ego after" Admiral Camara. He
is strict disciplinarian, and those
who know him say he is not unlike
Admiral Dewey.
John G. Watson was born in Ken
lucky, August "a, 1912. His father
was prominent physician, and his
mother was daughter of John Jor
dan Crittenden, the celebrated Ken.
lucky statesman who was attorney
general in William Henry Harrison's
cabinet. Admiral Watson's naval |
career has been notable one. He !
entered the Naval Academy Septem-
Der 20, 1856, and graduated in June,
1860, standing high in his classes.
He was prominent in the naval opera
tons throughout the Civil War, and
was in some noted battles. In 1864
be was made flag lieutenant to Ad-
mlral Farragut. During the last 30
years he commanded some of the
best ships in the Navy. He married
IN 1878 to Miss Elizabeth Thornton,
Of San Francisco. They have seven
children living, the eldest of whom is
John Edward Watson, an ensign on
he cruiser 'Detroit."
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

Men look at things through angles
There are three kinds of angles.
First there is the acute angle which
may vary from eighty-nine degrees
to one degree. Some men see things
through very acute angles. The
angle of their vision being defined by
many things: prejudice, pride pre-
conception, ignorance, self interest
etc. The opinions they hold are
determined bv the size of their angle,
Then there are the obtuse angles
which may vary from ninety-one to
one hundred-seventy-nine degrees,
The organ of their vision if magnified
they look at things through lenses
and o.getdisproportionate, ampl1fed
exaggerated views. Their sweep is
too wide. They take in too much.
The extremist is a sample. The ex-
IRENE optimist or pessimist are illus
trations. They look at life through
obtuse angles. Such men are obtuse
thinkers, writer's, speakers. AS the
microscopic would say "they never
get field for the thing they are
looking for and which needs to be
SEEN"
Then there is the right angle.
Ninety degrees and no more. These
men see things rightly proportioned
balanced and in right rela-
and adjustments. What
we need are men of the right angled
vision. The point of a right angle
is the meeting point of three others
angles and from that point you may
get glimpse of the circumference of |
truth.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03
REAR ADMIRAL JOHN {. WATSON.
Afterthoughts.

The machinery for the manufacture
of opinions in some mems minds is
self-lubricating There is a large
supply of oil. The result is large
supply of the manufactured article
This is the day of over-supply. The
man with opinions is better after all
than the man without. The first may
be mule, but the second is mon
key.
It is an unfortunate thing to be
affected with bashful conscience.
Love is the epitome of duty.
The lines of life are two. One is a
broad guage the other a narrow
guage. If you are on the latter get
off it.
There are lots of little men in the
world. | should hate to think there
were many small men. Yet you can
see sometimes great many men so
small that they could dance a sailors
hornpipe on the fine edge of a cam
brio needle and not fall off.
Lives of little men remind us
There are yet of things, few
They departing leave behind them
For the bigger men to do.
Lives of the biggest men remind us
That they made their lives sub
lime }
And departing left behind them
Things for us to do-sometime.
The Longfellows and the Bigfel-
lows and the Greatfellows can't do it |
all; SO the ShortfelloWs and the Little
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

KENYON, erstwhile bank examiner,
has been given a job in the Indian
department, and the Princeton Union
charged the same to Tams Bixby,
but it is noticeable certain ones are
always provided for whatever polite
al flag the ship Of state sails under.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

WITH the census of 1900. Mime
sofa will given two or three more con-
gressmen, and the chances are that
the principal changes in COMPRESSION
al districts will be in the Second,
Sixth and Seventh.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

THE Greater America Exposition
will open at Omaha, July LIST. { Be
SIDES the usual line of exhibits, there
will be Cuban, Porto Riean, Hawaiian
and Filipino villages, the latter OF
which is expected to be very interest
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03
The grihn11e.
J. C. MORRISON, EDITOR AND PROP.
SATURDAY, JUNE 8, 1899.

On June 9, Fitzsimmons and JET
fries are to meet at Coney Island, and
after it's all over who'll be any better
Of therefor?
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03
fellows and the Smallfellows have a
chance to do what they can.

"I'm holding my own" said the
man. That's good,' you might be
holding somebody else's.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03
It is an unfortunate thing to be
affected with bashful conscience.

The lines of life are two. One is a
broad guage the other a narrow
guage. If you are on the latter get
off it.
Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1899-06-03

no
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1899-08-30
Allegiance Affirmed to Free Silver,
at l6 to l, and the Chicago Platform.
AN APOTHE0SIS OF ". ]. BRYAN
Platform Denounces Trusts, I'm
periaIism and Foreign Alliances.
M'LEA n MEN CONT r o L

CONVENTION HALL, GAINESVILLE. Ohio,
August 30.-Memorial Hall was packed
when Mr.. W. S. Thomas. chairman of the
democratic state committee, today called
ing prayer, Very Rev. l.. F. kearney
prayed most earnestly for the deliverance
OF the Filipinos from the brute force now
being inflicted upon them. The prayer was
50 radical and forcible throughout that il
brought forth rounds of most vociferous
applause.
W. S. Thomas made an address of some
length on the work of the last campaign
and the great contest that was to be waged
In the year preceding the presidential cleo
ton.
Judge W. p. Mooney, temporary chair
man Of the convention, was then introduced
and was received with a great ovation.
A Vigorous Proclamation.
Judge Mooney spoke at length. He said,
among other things, the following:
There will be today no contest as to the
platform declarations which our party
shall make. There Is no difference of opin-
ion. The democratic party of Ohio stands
squarely upon every plank of the Chicago
Platform of 1896. We believed 1t then and
we believe ii now.
The people who sent us here do not be-
lieve in a double standard of democracy.
In 1896 the test was, Are you loyal TO the
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1899-08-30
WOOD ARRESTS JIMlNEZ
Detains the santo Domingo Revolutionist
at Santiago.

A Santiago de Cuba dispatch of August
% says: Gen. Juan Isidro Jiminez, the rev.
olutionary aspirant to the presidency of the
republic Of Santo Domingo, who arrived
here yesterday with his two sons by the
South Coast steamer, but was not allowed
to land, came ashore today and was placed
under arrest by the order Of Gen. Leonard
Wood the military governor, who will not
permit him to proceed to Santo Domingo,
except after instructions to that effect from
Havana.
Gen. Jlminez is very indignant at the
trea atment to which he is subjected though
he does not attempt to conceal his inten-
ton to proceed to Santo Domingo and to
become president of the republic.
Although yesterday he declined to be in
terviewed. alleging that he was always
misrepresented by the press, he talked
freely today. Gen. Jiminez said that when
Gen. Heureaux, the late president of Santo
Domingo. was assassinated he cabled to his
friends in Santo Domingo to do nothing un-
til his arrival
Claims His Detention Caused Outbreak
The principal portion Of the revolution
ary forces complied with this request, but,
he asserted. his detention by the Americans
had forced a general outbreak, which would
probably be successful Immediately, and
would certainly accomplish the purpose
within ten days after his arrival in the
country.
He said he had received cabled informa-
ton today that the revolutionists hold
practically the whole republic. except the
capital, San Domingo. He referred to Gen.
Gomez as my particular friend" but said
the latter was in no way involved in Dom
inican affairs.
Criticized Gen. Wood.
In reply to the question as to whether
expeditions in his interest were leaving
Cuba, he criticised the action of Gen. Wood
in preventing the departure Of the one re-
Gently organized at Baracoa. He would not
say definitely whether there were others
planning to leave.
Gen. Jiminez talked in an entertaining
way of the conditions and resources of
Santo Domingo. The corruption of the old
government, he said. exasperated the en-
tire people. who for many years had been
desirous that he should return and lead the
insurrection. He responded with feeling to
a toast to the Future president of Santo
Domingo" A close examination of his
twenty-six trunks revealed no arms.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1899-08-30
WOMEN BICYCLE RIDERS.
Proposition in Kansas to Compel
Them to Secure Licenses.

CHICAGO, August 3O.-Walter H. Cowel
an attorney of Kenosha, has presented to
the Kenosha city council a bicycle ordi-
nance which prohibits women from riding
unless they have passed an examination as
to their fitness to guide a wheel. When the
attorney announced his determination to
draw an ordinance the matter was consid-
cred as joke, but the affair now has gone
so far that 1t seems certain that the city
council will take some action on the ques-
ton. The ordinance provides that it shall
be unlawful for any female to ride in Ken
osha without having first obtained from
the city clerk license. To obtain this IL
cense the applicant must be examined by
three experts as to her ability to ride with
out endangering the safety and personal
rights of others. If the experts pass her
riding she must file 500 bond that all
damages caused by careless riding or other
improper handling or manipulation of BIZ
cycle will be paid by the said female If the
accident is shown to be resultant from the
carelessness of said lcensee. In no case is
the ordinance to apply to a woman riding
with a man escort on tandem.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1899-08-30
A British Official Declares That War
Is Inevitable.
DOM PAUL CANNOT GOVERN CABINET
Some Prefer Eradication If Inde-
pendence is Not Gained.
CAPE TOWN HOPES FOR PEACE

SEATTLE, Wash, August 30-David L..
Wilson. who claims to be an agent of the
British government and to have important
papers for the home office, has arrived here
en- route to London from the Transvaal.
Mr.. Wilson says he has no doubt that there
will be war.
II have been three years in the Trans
vaal and know the leaders of the Boer
government WELL President Kruger does
not want war. He is now an old man. AS
such he has not the control Of the cabinet
that he had once. The cabinet is composed
of young blood who want independence and
who, / may say, will never give up until
they have either attained it or been wiped
out Of existence by the English forces
This is why 1 say there will be war.
British Practically Ready.
THE story sent out that Gen. Joubert has
found that the reserve shells in the Pre-
toria forts are ineffective is probably true.
A partial knowledge of this fact has been
known fer some time in British ministerial
circles. There will be no trouble in re-
placing the ammunition, however.
Gen. Joubert, / know personally, is op-
posed to war. He will lead the Boer forces
when war comes. He is fighter, man of
courage and will simply be sacrifice to his
ambition.
fatal one in the Transvaal The British for
months have been massing troops and are
practically ready at this time, If necessity
demands immediate action"
Different Feeling in Capetown.
CAPE TOWN, August 30.-It is said in
Afrikander circles here. in spite of the per-
sistent warike rumors, there are good
prospects of peace. 1t is believed that sew
eral strongly worded communications have
been addressed to President Kruger of the
Transvaal republic. urging the desrability
of using every effort to obtain a peaceful
solution Of the trouble.
Mr.. Wm P. Schreiner of Cape Colony has
telegraphed to President Steyn of the
Orange Free State earnestly expressing the
hope that peace will be preserved, and de-
claring his confidence that he president
Steyn) would do his utmost to this end
TransvaaI Police Arrested.
LOURENZO MARQUEE, Delagoa Bay,
August 3o.-Two Transvaal police officers
were arrested today upon their arrival
here