davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
BABY CARRIED IN A VALISE.
Odd Experience Related by an Old
Time Conductor.

Odd Experience Related by an Old
Time Conductor.
"Carrying baby in a grip is a new
wrinkle on me- remarked an old-time
palace car conductor at a downtown
hotel the other night. 1T was away
out in western Iowa." he continued,
that the incident I am about to re-
late happened. 1 had two porters in
my car. One was the regular porter,
lie, and the other darkey was just
being broken in. He was on the first
run and wanted to catch on to the busi-
ness. Well, somewhere west of Mar
shalltown an elderly man climbed on
the sleeper. He had two grips, one fat
one, the other a mere hand grip. He
remarked to the porter to handle the
bags very carefully and to keep them
upright. The man went into the smok-
ing apartment and ordered his grips
placed in his berth. It so happened
that the new porter got hold of him,
and can never understand how it
happened that there wasn't a tragedy
on the car, for he took the fat grip and
gave it big toss, handing it up on the
top berth. There wasn't a sound
Pretty soon the man came out the
smoker and proceeded to retire. He
made considerable fuss about the
rough way, in which his grips had been
handled and the finding of the large
one upstairs. In the night some time
a baby's voice was heard. The little
one cried several times, but always
quieted down. The sound was traced
to the berth of the man who had been
fussy about his grips. Next morning
he did not get up and remained in the
berth until the train reached Chicago.
When he left the car the big grip was
as heavy as ever and the porter receiv-
ed the same precautions about careful
handling. managed to get around in
front of him and asked if the baby was
all right. He looked little puzzled
and then answered in the most indif-
ferent way that it was all right, but
had spent a:rather restless night. He
said he always carried it in the grip to
avoid appearance, taking along several
bottles Of milk when on long trip
d..
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
SPEND TOO MUCH FOR DRESS.
Englishmen Find Fault with American
Vomen'S EXtravagance.

Englishmen Find Fault with American
Women's Extravaganza.
If the opinion of the average Eng
lishman is worthy of credence-and the
opinion, indeed, of all men throughout
Europe-American women spend too
much money on their personal adorn-
ment. It is one fault of the women of
America that they consider themselves
obliged to buy perishable dresses to
meet the exigencies of fashion; while
in England princess, duchess, will
do with one handsome silk as her only
elegant costume. The tyranny of dress
makers and the frequent changes of
fashion make dress very serious busi-
ness to fashionable women in America
if they chance to be poor And in Civ
ing good material into the hands of in
experienced dressmakers women often
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
Howsa This?

We offer One Hundred Dollars reward for any
case of Catarrh that cannot be cured by Halls
Catarrh Cure.
F. J. CHENEY Geo. Props Toledo. O.
Cheney for the last Is years and believe him
perfectly honorable in: all business transactions
and financially able to- carry out any obhsa-
tions made by their firm
West & Truax Wholesale Druggists, Toledo.
O.; Walding. Kinnan 81 Marvin Wholesale
Druggists. Toledo. Ohio.
Hail's Catarrh Cure is taken intsEna1ly, act
ing directly upon the blood Ind MUCOUS surfaces
OF the system. Testimonials sent free Price
75c per bottle Sold by all druggists
Halls FamilNRills are the beSt-
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
Tastes.

Detroit Journal: 'My DEAR" Moth
once upon time observed, "it seems
to me our daughter devours a good
many novels" The Moths wife
shrugged her shoulders deprecatingly.
Better that than to care only for
clothes,'' she replied. This fable
teaches that the taste for literature is
almost always comparatively a good
thing.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
Are. Yeu usfnx Aliens Foot-Ease

Are. Yeu listing Aliens Foot-Easee.
It is the, only cure for Swollen.
Smarting,. Burning, Sweating Feet,
Corns and Bunions. Ask For Aliens
Foot-Ease, a powder-to be shaken into
the shoes. At all Druggists and Shoe
Stores, 25c. Sample sent FREE. Ad-
dress Allen S. Olmsted, Leroy, n. Y.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
Chicago Great Western Encreas,

: The gross earnings Of the Chicago
Great WESTERN Ry: for the second week
of September; 1859, show an increase
Of S37, ,922.7O over the corresponding
week Of last year; making a total in
crease of: $65, 1899. SO for the first half Of
September: The total increase for July
and August, the first two months of
the fiscal year, has been S15G, ,635. .GS.
Increase in net earnings since July 1st,
ST.. .367.15.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
Cheaper.

@tWhy is it you never entertain Jones
any more? You used to say that he
could sit down any time and give you
all the news Of the day"
$50 he could. But, after figuring Oh
what he ate, smoked and drank. [
found that I could save money by TAX
ing three or four frst-class newspa-
perS.''-Detroit Free Press.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
A Great Improvement.

y Penn-Can you suggest any way in
which might improve my new novel?
Rrushe You might put the last chap
ter first. Penn-But all the characters
die in the last chapter. Brushe- Yes,
/ know. H.. FL ~ r.. ...>,r = i.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
A MAMMOTH INSTITUTION.

To those who are accustomed to
sending away from home for their
goods it is of the greatest Importance
to know the character and reliability
Of the establishments selling goods to
families from catalogues. The great
emporium of the John NJ. Smyth Co.,
located at $50 to 1855 West Madison
street, Chicago, has been established
for a third of century, and has fur
nished over a half a million homes in
Chicago and vicinity alone. This firm
enjoys the confidence Of the public by
its many years of fair dealing, 1t is
sues an immense illustrated catalogue
that should be in every family, as it
describes and. gives the price of every
article required for household use. A
sample of the extraordinary values Of
fered by this firm is shown in the illus
tration of the lady's' ulster in another
column of this paper. These garments
are indeed wonderful values, and yet
they are but. sample, at the sthsusand
and one useful articles illustrated and
described in the beautiful catalogue Of
the John M. Smyth, Company.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
Free Homestends,

In the Milk River Valley of Montana,
along the Great Northern Railway.
Fine openings for homeseeke=s Write
to Moses Folsom, G. N: Ry, st. Paul,
Minn. =:
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
Like the Pilgrim MGfhSr.

Like the Pilgrim Mothers,
A great deal is said of the trials Of
Job, but his wife who had to put up
with him when. he was sick, deserves
more credit.-Atchison Globe. dds
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
Never Grin nor Crime.

Never Grip nor Gripe.
Don't open the door with an ak, use keys
Don't open your bowels with mercuriat pill
poison, use Cascarets Candy Cathartic! Drug
gists, 10c, 25c. 50c. '.-:~F' s-ES55-
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04

It lis an important business engage
ment for man when an Eeiress prom
ises to marry him. -
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04

For Lung and chest.diseases, Piso's Curs
is the best medicine we have used.-Ars.
]. L. Northcott, Windsor, Ont. Canada
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
THE Cheerful Idiot.

"POIities make, strange bedfelloWs,''
said the shoe clerk boarder.
1T does bring together some curious
boom companions" said the Cheerfur
Idiot.-lndfanapolis Journal.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04

The average politician is not only
willing but anxious to sacrifice himself
for his country in time Of peace.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04

The advanced woman who sees things
as they are sometimes drives her hus.
bard to seeing things double.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04

Woman Runs q Single AIiIl. d:
Miss Clara Stimson is a young woman
of Maine who has shown that a young
woman can run shingle mill wtth
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04

Der of snakes in this station, and VIII
the rains set in it is rarely that day
passes without several poisonous ones
being destroyed in the cantonment
The strong spring of the trap had .evi-
IDENTIFY killed the kraft instantane-
ously, as the trap had not been moved
from the spot in which it was set. -. !. :,
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04
For the Same. Ressom-

She-Why does a. woman take a
mans name when she gets married?
He-Why does she take everything
else he as?-Cincinnati Enquirer
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-11-04

There are 10000 locomotives in. use
Fon American railroads. They repre-
sent an investment Of s5O. .000, ,O0O.-
The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1899-06-22
e d.
N;RMF
Odds and Ends.

A church in London still possesses an
income originally given to it for the pur-
pose of buying fagots for burning heretics.
A law was recently passed in Norway
prohibiting the sale of tobacco to any boy
under 16 years of age without signed or
der from an adult relative or employer
Even tourists who offer cigarets to boys
render themselves liable to prosecution
The police are instructed to confscate the
pipes, cigars and cigarets of lads who
smoke in the public streets A fine for the
offense Is also imposed, which may be any,
where between so cents and $25.
queer survival would have perished in a
roar of laughter long ago, but the "field Of
honor" seems to retain it's attractions, in
spite of every drawback. The latest ex-
ample is reported from Bonn, where pair
Of footmen quarreled over a pot of beer,
and must needs vindcate their sacred hon.
or with all the punctilio of their masters.
Cards, visits from the seconds, ceremoniOus
salutes-every fateful formality, in fact
except bullets-were carefully exchanged
When at last the dreadful moment came
and the opponents faced each other, they
were carefully blindfolded. The seconds
lay fiat upon the ground Immediately the
word fire was given and for some time the
until the honor of the untouched principles
was as thoroughly satisfied as their thirst
for gore. After this one may recommend
wireless telegraphy as an admirable system
for settling disputes. Not only would the
principals be unable to see each other, they
would also be entirely out of harms way,
and the seconds would be able to maintain
far more dignifed attitude during the
encounter.
The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1899-06-22

patriotic, and about as intelligent as
they are today. But they could not
vote on the question, and hence took
comparatively little interest in it. Re-
sponsibility aroused the interest of the
women, and this time they helped ma
terially to bring out the men, besides
aiding large vote of their own. The
tax-paying women OF Baton Rouge cast
their first vote about the same time.
The question at issue was the levying
of special tax for sewerage, public
school buildings, paving the streets,
owning a new city hall, and other i'm
proyements. The Baton Rouge Evening
Truth says: Zone of the facts brought
to light by the election is that the num-
Der of female proLerts holders in this
city is equal to that CT the males. The
women poled an enormous vote, which
was greatly responsible for the passage
Of the measure at issue. Any movement
in which the ladies are interested is
bound to succeed, and they have rem
dered signal service to the city and to
it's entire population"
The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1899-06-22
Democratic, Not Plutocratic, Social
ism.


ism,
Many express fear Of socialism with
out knowing that one form of socialism
is already here-the plutocratic. The
plutocratic socialism-socialism without
democracy-is the only form we need
to fear. The trust utilizes the methods
Of socialism-combi cooperation
and co-ordination-to get the best re-
suits from man and nature without the
socialist aim and spirit. The trust is
simply socialism for the benefit of the
few. The trust, however, has come,
and come to stay. The only solution Of
the problem is that which has been
pointed out, the socialization of the
trust, that the benefits now monOp-
,olized by the few may become the in
heritance of all. The choice must be
made between plutocratic socialism and
The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1899-06-22
MINNEAPOLIS THURSDAY q,

the man, when found, was too dead to
testify, and nobody else was present at
the killing the judgment stands at ten
dollars. This much for the legal lumin-
aries of New Jersey and Connecticut.
We have not yet had any judicial deci-
sions from hell, but we feel very sure
that no Judge there will be able to sur
pass the above named jurists in wicked
ness and barbarity. Is it any wonder
that the people are beginning to despise
all the courts and hold their opinions
in derision? Is it strange that the fed
eral courts of the nation are Kissing
and by-word among the people?
Would any judge have made such deci-
sion as the above thirty years ago?
Would not all the courts been encroach-
ing on all the people until they now
claim to be the absolute rulers of every
body, even of the coordinate branches
of the government? If good law is
passed, the courts set it aside, and thus
the legislature is overruled. If the gov
ernor does something that plutocracy OBJ
jects to the courts order him to desist and
thus the executive authority is over
thrown. If the laboring men strike in
favor of justice the court suppresses
them with an Injunction, and thus all
the people are coerced and overpowered.
Under present conditions we might as
well dispense with the governor and
legislature and allow the courts to make
and execute the laws. This would save
a lot OF expense and would not in
crease the power already assumed by
the judges. We are glad to say that not
everybody acQuiesces in the tyrannical
proceedings of the courts. Occasionally
strong man resists their DEGREES.
There was a striking example of this
In Nebraska last year. The supreme
court ordered Governor Holcomb to do a
certain thing which he did not think
right to do. He told the court that it
had no jurisdiction over him, as the
executive branch of the government was
not subject to the dictation of the court.
The court insisted that he should obev.
and he insisted that the court should
mind its own business. The court laid
down and ate humble pie" as grace
fully as it could.
The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1899-06-22

WAtsOhs tribute 10 the O10 Green-
hackers and POpulists.
In one of his recent speeches Hon.
Thomas e. Watson paid the following
eloquent tribute to the old Greenbackess
and their Populist successors:
"At last some of the people realize
what was going on. The Greenbacker
arose and appealed to the nation. His
voice arrested attention. His challenge
to debate could not be met. His was the
triple armor Of the champion whose
quarrel is just. Therefore he was de-
MED hearing. Politicians reviled him,
slandered him, lied about him in the
canvass, cheated him at the polls. The
paid newspapers covered him with abuse
and ridicule. The very people he was
fighting for were made to hate him.
"Yet, truth being mighty, he contin-
ued to wax strong. Force could not
crush him, and they resorted to fraud
and deceit. The two great political par
the land, pretended to be sorry, promis-
ed in the platforms to be better Green
hackers than the Greenbackers them
selves, and some of the Greenback lead
ers were taken up to the top of small
potato hill and shown a NANCY little Of
flee and the contemplate was greatly
tempted.
"Purer motives, nobler aims, never
thrilled a people than those which moved
the men and women who organized the
Peoples Party. Ridiculed, abused, SLAM
dered, yet they fought on, and we were
growing as the storm cloud grows. We
could not be met in debate. Our case
was too plain, our roots too positive.
Newspapers had to close their columns
to us. The editor gave his readers
slanders-not arguments. The politi-
clans gave the people .falsehoods-
reason. They could howl us down, they
could shoot us down, they could count us
out, but they could not meet us in fair
debate, and they had sense enough to
know it.
1--WE found the tree of human liberty
planted here when we came into the
world; let us see to it that we leave it
standing. We found the sacred torch of
freedom burning; let us keep it lit and
pass on. Let the sower diet must
be so; but let him scatter good seed first
then leave the harvest to time and to
God.
CAS- firmly as If my feet were on the
rocks I believe in the final triumph of
right-believe that justice will yet rule
the world, believe that the white banner
of universal peace shall supplant the
blood red flags of war. Parties may come
and go, force and fraud may yet rule the
day, but yet and ever yet, believe that
right shall yet sit on the throne of the
world, and rule the hearts OF all men.
"The clouds gather, know, and the
land. The weaklings perish; the birds
of the day may fall and flutter and die.
But the eagle, he of the ages, strong of
wing and dauntless of heart, rises
against the storm, beats his way
through and beyond it, and gives fierce
cry of Joy as he bathes his wings in the
sunlight above the cloud.
20 spirit of Populism, be thou the
eagle---to rise against the darkness and
the storm, and to live in the sunlight
beyond when the tempest is passed and
gone"
The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1899-06-22
Worse Than q Live Wire.

All the boys learn something about
electricity, and about the danger from
the wires which stretch like the strands
of huge cobweb over our city streets;
but they do not remember that, danger
GUS though these wires are the stuff sold
by the saloon keepers, and the cigarettes
The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1899-06-22

(Suggested by hearing young man
speak disparagingly of young girl.)
One night as the devil sat musing alone
In the midst of his cozy, warm fire,
And trying to figure the difference in
guilt,
Tween a thief and an all-round liar.
His memory turned to the scenes of his
youth,
And his eyes filled with hot, boiling
tears,
So he took down his ledger and turned
to the page,
Dated about six thousand years.
II suppose" he exclaimed, as he glanced
through the book,
"I am doing the best that I can,
For my business denotes continual in
crease,
Ever since the creation of man.
I've cribbed good harvest for six
thousand years,
And should be content with the yield,
And give my opponent permission to
The gleanings that I leave in the field.
I've gathered diversified crop
Of merchants and lawyers galore,
-
Every one of my fingers are sore.
I've fiddlers, gamblers and insurance
men,
I've murderers, forgers and liars,
And filled up the furnace with green
Democrats,
Till they actually put out the fires.
I've railroad conductors and doctors to
spare,
Horse traders and preachers to spend;
Republicans, Populists, Tories and
wings
And two or three newspaper men.
But there is one class, I'm happy to
say,
Can never gain entrance here;
Their souls are so dirty, I'm sure that
they would,
DenlOralize hell in year. 9ETsH
I refer to that thing, neither human nor
beast,
The carrion crow Of the world,
Who never is happy unless he can feast
On the wreck Of an innocent girl.
A million of years in my warmest Of
rooms,
His SANDER would never atone,
So give him match and advise him to
start
A select little hell of his own"
With his fingers he lit an asbestos cigar,
And placing his book on a shelf,
He muttered, II may be a very bad
man,
But I've got some respect for myself
The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1899-06-22
Penalty of Pride.

There is an old gentleman living in one
of the most respectable sections of the city,
who prepared for college by being a school
teacher. He admits that it stumps him
to recall the Greek alphabet in it's entirety,
and that Latin is literally a dead language
to him, but he imagines himself as strong
on mathematic as ever. One of his neigh
hors is high school girl who is in the
throes Of algebra, and not infrequently
works her brain into partial paralysis over
the puzzles presented by this branch. A
few evenings ago she wrestled with few
problems until cold water ceased to relieve
a throbbing brain, and then thought Of the
ex-pedagogue. She hastened to him. The
Old gentleman looked at the examples and
bad no more idea of how they should be
worked than if he'd never seen a school
house. But he has pride to burn, so he
pleaded a pressure of business, said that
he would send the solution over in the
morning, and thus gave himself loophole.
But what night! The rusty veteran be-
gan at the beginning. brushing up on def
nitions, thcGrems and rules. Then he tackled
the work in hand. 1t seemed like trying to
kick his way out of a quag mire. His task
was in the division of radicals, and he COW
cred sheet after sheet of paper with KS, )"
"Ys," "Z,' extracted roots from the square
to the fifteenth. perspired over fractions
and compound fractions, restored weary
intellect by recourse to cold tea, said i'm
proper things that he had not said before
in thirty years, gritted his teeth and knitted
his brows, but never threw up the sponge
Wien it was gray dawn, the birds sing
ing and the milkmen hurryiug over their
routes, he had conquered. Then he put his
finished work on paper, appending brief
note, stating that he ~>rs compelled to do
the thing hurriedly, and trusted it was all
right. Such is pride, and he was down for
breakfast at p. m.-Detroit Free Press.