Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1899-11-13
A HARD MAN TO BEAT
The LIVE RAILROAD AGENT is UP TO
ALL SORTS OF TRICKS.

selves, Dut This story SHOWS Row One
Party Was Cleverly Outwitted by the
Hustlins Railroader.
''There are people who think you
can't beat circus man, but want to
tell you that the hardest man to do is
live railroad man."
The old sawdust manager had tried
it. He continued:
know where Purcell is in the In
dian Territory? Away down at the
jumping off place on the Santa Fe road.
The show had been at Purcell and we
wanted to get out in the night for a
long run. We were going TO make a
jump to Kansas City. Not far from
Purcell is another town. Oklahoma
City. At that point competing road
with the Santa Fe runs in. We had 500
people. and of course the railroad men
were after us. 1t was big haul. Some
of our people bought through tickets
from Purcell, and they didn't worry.
But about 200, maybe more, of the
crowd that always haggles over IA 10
cent dicker concluded to take the Santa
Fe from Purcell to Oklahoma City, pay
the short haul, and then take the COM
peting line at Oklahoma, the agents of
which were active and full of promises.
"Then the Santa Fe man fixed it so
the diekerers couldn't buy any tickets
from Purcell to Oklahoma, for the train
we were to go on was a special. The
dickerers said that was all right; that
they would wait for the regular. In
less than five minutes a bulletin was
slapped on the board of the station to
the effect that the regular Santa Fe was
10 hours late. That made the fellows
who were dickering for cheaper rate
turn white around their gills.
"In another five minutes saw a man
on track velocipede scudding down the
stretch. Every man to his business. So
! thought the railroad people kner
what they were doing, and they did.
That chap on the yelooipede was going
down the track to flag the regular and
hold it indefinitely. Smart trick, wasn't
iti Wait till I tell you. There was
smarter trick than that.
"When the special got ready to pull
out, the diokerers asked the agent if
they could pay on the train from Pur-
cell to Oklahoma, and he said Cert.
So they all boarded the train at Pur-
cell, intending to get off at Oklahoma.
Just before the train pulled out the
agent walks down to the engine and
asks the old man at the throttle how
long he had been on the road and about
the capacity of his iron horse, and SO
forth.
How many miles an hour can she
go at her best?' asked the agent.
"'On good track, 60 miles
is it good track through Oklaho-
ma City?'
"'Yes, pretty good.
"'All right. You've got no orders to
stop there nor to slow up, have your
"'Not yet.
"Well, when you get to the edge Of
the town you let her 60. Don't stop for
anything-fags or teams or cattle.
Scoot through the town at 80 mile
gait, or more if you like, and don't
slow up until you strike that strip of
desolation about l 1 miles t'other side
and you smoke box of the finest cigars
in Chicago. Is it go?'
If don't get no orders fore l
start
"'Well, you are five minutes late
now.
''In minute, and I calculate it was
less, the circus special was under way.
1t went around curves like a scared
snake. It shot across straight lines like
gazelle that had been singed. 1t
whirled the dust of that country into
the sky. After awhile we saw town.
Then we went through it like the wom-
an that's shot from the catapult, only
more so. One of the dickerers, who was
smiling to think the conductor had not
yet come round, asked brakeman as
the train was going through the street,
What town is tbis?' The brakeman
said, Oklahoma City
1.-The dickerer's smile faded as it
came, as the poet says, and his hair
stood up, and turning to the brakeman
be says:
'Jezecrimini Stop herr Here's
where we get off,
"'She doesn't even hesitate at town
like this, said the brakeman.
"Well, about IL miles on this side,
in q strip Of country where crow can't
live and where an Indian wouldn't be
caught dead, the old iron horse began to
slow up. The conductor came through
just then and said:
"'Tickets!'
"Well, say, that was funny sight.
Them that had tickets showed up and
then went to sleep. But the diokerers
began to kick. They said they should
have been let off at Oklahoma City.
The conductor said the train didn't stop
at Oklahoma, that it wasn't scheduled
to stop there, and that he wasn't going
to go back that trip. The leader of the
dickerers for cheap fares. wanted to
know what was TO be done.
"The conductor was an old timer. He
had a face on him like woman who
never loved anybody. He just told
them, Pay or get off. Then they asked