The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1899-05-22
TALES OF THE TOWN.

Jim Shields. the veteran travelling man.
has the reputation of being able to take
care of himself all the year around but
there are those who say he's easy. And in
| proof thereof they tell the story of an in
| cident that occurred in Chicago couple
torinm An nsS AS M Mecu az as Fisher
Harris. Waldemar Van Colt and Brig Ell
| lerbeck We're staying there, on the way TO
Europe. Mr.. Shields dropped into the
hotel the day after their arrival. He
I found them in the rotunda. The very
man We've been looking for said one Of
We've spent dollars sending out mes
senger boys 10 try to ind you and couldn't
| get a trace of you.'
! Shields marveled for moment: then
suggested that there should have been no
| difficulty encountered. .'Of course, 1 sup
| pose you've done your BEST, he went on,
| but if you'd had any city experience, you
would have known what to do. I'm not
| finding any fault, but really, gentlemen,
\ any one who had not lived his entire life
in a country town should be able to dis
cover man, even in so great a city as
Chicago. which, may add. will be larger
than Greater New ork or London as soon
as we get through the ordinance annexing
| Des Moines, Indianapolis and Detroit and
| the other towns in the triangle. Seriously,
though. you fellows should have inquired
or 6v Poll what to do sb ae would
which is precisely the proper thing.
At this point Van Colt headed Shields
on. Who would put your name in the
directory" he inquired, with marked sar-
casm.
why. they couldn't issue a Chicago di.
rectory without James +. Shields In II,
came tho answer.
Van Colt and the others jollied Shields
| for a time. until the latter wanted TO bet
| that his name had been in every Chicago
| directory for forty years. Then they all
| walked over TO the desk. where one of
| them asked for the book. 1t was produc
page containing IL had been torn out. Mr..
Shields paid for a supper al kinsley's. He
has the missing leaf from the directory.
He found it, it is said. in Fisher Harris
pocket.
Ex-Councilman OMeara tells this one
| on Police Sergeant Burbidge, BurbidSe
was on the owl shift and was doing a
lonesome turn on East Second South
street, in order to head of "a promised
burglary. II was a cold night and dark,
and Burbidges disposition grew uncertain
as the night dragged on. colder and cold
| er. and still no burglars came. About
o'clock in the morning he saw a white
| figure cross the lawn in front of the house
he was watching. In trice Burbidge had
the figure by the arm. II was a man clad
In ba1amaS and sound asleep. His teeth
were chattering with the cold when he
awakened, and they chartered still more
when the officer invited him to come along
I to the station. What are you going to
arrest me for?'' he asked. II haven't done
care what church you belong to. You
just come along" answered Burbidge.
No man can run around this town in a
bathing suit"
Did 1 tell you about being held up last
night?" said the laxative citizen to his
n NEG as the car rolled cityward;
mo? Well. talking about sensations, L
had plenty of them. You know, live on
Sixth East street. About 2:3O a m. was
plodding along on First South. headed for
hon cf,f- afraIri oh. dc
or anything else except bed and how soon
could get there. Between Fifth and
Sixth East. on. the south side, of First
South is spot that's as black at that
time of night as the inside of coal
mine | believe | was humming a tune
when reached it.
Suddenly a voice came out of the dark
ness. right at my elbow. 1t said: Hold
on, pardner.' To tell you the truth, was
so badly scared | was paralyzed. Stop?
You bet ] stopped. BY looking closely in
the direction from which the voice had
come | was able to make out the shadowy
outlines of a mans form. In his right
hand which hung at his side, l saw some
thing shiny, which l Immediately conjec-
tured was a knife or a gun.
''All this took a small fraction of 8 min
uta When i could collect myself l said,
trying to keep my voice from shaking:
What the dickens do you want?' The
footpad moved over toward me and re-
Piled; Jush vanish you to have g.
his right hand. and L saw that 1t contain
ed a bottle of whisky.
Talk about revulsion of feeling Well,
had a severe attack of it right then and
there. My scare gave way to righteous
Indignation and | refused that drink III
terms more emphatic than polite. Then
the fellow wanted me to direct him 10
some little court or other. and | stopped
long enough to do it. If had really been
held up; though l couldn't have come
You ought to have directed your friend
to the police COURT said the neighbor,
after the fashion of men who always
think of the right thing TO say after some
body else has suggested it.
There was well-authenticated story on
the rialto yesterday that De Witt B.
standing high jump in both amateur and
professional classes. This Is the way 1t
happened, according to Bill Griffith and
like $500 on the ball game between the
rival exchanges Saturday. taking, of
course. the Salt Lake end. OF course, he
went up to see the contest and as the
Utah lads forged ahead in the first few
innings, the brokers' face elongated until
it looked like a corn-knife set up on
walking cane.
When the Utahns had acquired a lead
of twelve runs De Witt could stand the
strain no longer. With a cry of anguish
he fled from the grounds, convinced that
his money was gone and that he hadn't
even gotten decent run for il. Saturday
night he came down town to mingle his
bet on the Salt Lakers. At the corner of
Main and Second South streets he met a
friend. who informed him that Salt Lake
had won, after all.
Right there is where Lowe broke the
high-jump record. 1t is claimed that he
shot up at least twenty feet in the air.
say a hundred for he knows De Witt
went as high as the top of the Auerbach
black Doc" however is prone to ex-
aggera ton. but all who saw the perform
ance unite in declaring that they will
never go into a standing high jump match
unless Lowe is barred.
Here is a bon mot one of the brokers
who favored the UtahS was guilty of after
the game: He was talking TO Umpire
Meinecke about the latters decision for
feiting the game to Salt Lake. Il won't
say you are rotten. Meinecke,' he said
but you looked awfully rotten"
A railroad man yesterday was heard
telling of some of the funny things that
have happened down on the Utah & Pa
cific. The Dixie country had never been
blessed with the near approach of a rail-
road until this year, and 1t naturally ex-
cites a great deal of curiosity among the
natives, some of whom have never seen
the iron horse except in picture books. /
This man tells of a missionary who was
on his way to Salt Lake, coming into Mo-
dena station. 1t was a plural proposition,
and the mans two wives had never seen
an engine They came stringing into Mo-
edna with q plentiful following of tow
headed. Wide-eyed children. and the whole |