Kentucky Irish American. (Louisville, Ky.) 1898-1968, 1899-08-05
And Introduces Her Successor
to the Readers of This
journal.
Also Wishes For a Return of
the Days When There Was
JOllity and Fun.
HAS The LAUGH ON The COLONEL
Especial Letter to the Kentucky Irish
American

]
SHELBYvILLE, KY, Aug. 4.-Not even
Lees elixir could smooth the ruffied
feathers of the birds that gathered in the
Sentinels sanctum, ostensibly to condole
with the disturbed editor but in reality
to devise ways and means to make public
the identity of the writer of the spirited
and occasionally sensational letters peri
odically appearing from this place in the
columns of the Kentucky Irish Ameri
can. The sympathy OF the assembled
victims of the incisive pen of the Shan
Van Vocht was, as mere formality and
as a binding and deceptive preliminary,
offered to the dropping plant so lately
transplanted because John Young Brown
boldly refuses to play in Goebel's back
yard and Indignantly and alphabetically
fails to water the geranium so that in all
beauty and freshness it may deck and
adorn the Cabinet of the King from Ken
ton. Will Kaltenbacher, than whom no
drawer Democrat ever came down the
pike, presided, we are informed, with
dignity sufficient TO make red wine turn
blue. For some moments Will twisted
and twitched the seven fair hairs that he
deyoutly imagines adorn his upper lip.
This is fayorite exercise with the local
editor of Goebels paper, and when he is
observed to be engaged in this mentally
exhausting occupation the knowing ones
say that the town is soon to suffer. Joe
Crane has been engaged for some time in
pouring out the brilliancy of his intellect
ual forces in compromising new tones,
known only to the initiated in the tonso-
rial art, to bring to perfection the fuzz on
the lip Of the Chairman of the above
mentioned meeting.
Unfortunately our age and our sex ex-
cluded us from the hall and from a par
ticipation in the wise deliberations of the
assembled sufferers. For this reason we
regret, for the sake of our readers and
admirers as we'll as for future history,
that we can only say that resolutions
were enthusiastically passed declaring
that no means nor expense should be
spared to find out whether the Shan Van
was not man or a resident of Louisville.
This done, it seems that Carrot Lee pro-
posed adjournment, but the presiding
officer, again gently toying with his incip-
lent mustache, and fully cegnizsnt of the
dignity and responsibility of his position,
refused TO notice the motion. All in all,
we are of the unalterable opinion that
the editor of the Sentinel should spare
few moments from his political occupa-
lions and endeavor to have this meeting
dramatized. Should he feel his inability
to perform the work we pledge him our
undivided assistance, which will be a
guarantee of complete success. Consid-
ering that they came together to discover
the whereabouts of the Shan Van and
who she is, we propose for the new play
the immortal words of Puck: what
Fools These Mortals Be-"
The Colonel" reasonably hoped for an
invitation, in recognition of his remark
able patience and acknowledged success
in teaching Gaelic to the Chairman of the
gathering. Alas! his hopes were doomed
to Disappointment. Failing in his secretly
planned efforts for admission, he pleas
antly spent the time in graphically mar
rating again to an intensely interested
young lady his wonderful experiences on
his recent trip to Mammoth Cave and the
blood-curdling escapes he had in the
famous Corkscrew.
AS this young lady in future will con-
tinue the work of the Shan Van Vocht,
whose age and infrmities, coupled with
ingratitude and disappointment, oblige
her to real her weary body and give
needed ease to her troubled spirit, II is
we'll that / here introduce her to her
future audience. Her face is like beau
tiful flower and her expression guileless
as that Of a nun. Her name she may
reveal in her first production. She limo
Gently asked the Colonel If Mr.. Kalten-
bacher was not the Shan Van. and mani
tested deep regret to hear that he con
templated shaving the above mentioned
mustache. Equally ingenious was hei
query as to the truth of the rumor that
Dennis Ryan and Roger Sheedy aban
doned the trip in the new rig in order &c
make it more interesting by going tandem
She is one whom we certainly recon-
mend, having ON this occasion the pleas
ure of her acquaintance. We have nc
hesitation whatever in confding into hel
beautifully delicate hands the work which
we feel that we have but half performed
We found many hours of pleasure in re
porting the authentic happenings Of oul
beautiful city. and we feel that man,
will regret that in future our days will b.
occupied with other than pen work. II
making our bow we declare that oul
aged heart is heavy, but happy are w
that Il no time ID our long experiences