The record-union. [volume] (Sacramento, Calif.) 1891-1903, 1899-01-10
Rice Aroused His Eloquence, but
Not His Appetite.

49,
He had all the appearance Of a hobo
from Hoboken. He called at West
State street residence this morning.
and when the woman of the house re-
sponded to his rap at the side door,
he bowed low and said
Just bit of the aftermath, if you
please"
Whats that you say?"
"a mere remnant, a shred, Of the
Thanksgiving turkey left over from
yesterday"
Touched with his politeness and the
elegance of his diction, as We say of
the minister, the woman passed through
to the kitchen, returning in moment
with a cup Of rice and an apology.
I'm very sorry" she said, but the
turkey is all gone. The best L can do
now is to offer you this rice and piece
of bread and butter
"Rice, is it," he said, with the same
bonhomie, as he took the proffered cup
and stirred up the contents with the
spoon. Rice is indeed a most popular
food product. 1t has been known to
man for many generations. Chemically
speaking, it is about IS per cent starch
and is, therefore, most nutritious. For
about three thousand years it was prac-
tically the only food of the Hindoos;
but do not think, madam, that I men
ton this as any disparagement. For
all know the Hindoos may have been
very choice and even fnicky in what
they ate during those three thousand
years, and really preferred rice; even
| insisted upon having it. Perhaps you
q cra0 hor O
intermingled with the starch of the ce-
real makes it just a bit more palatable.
and even this is heightened If the whole
| is smothered in good rich cream
I'm sorry, but we haven't either
sugar or cream in the house"
oh, no apology is necessary, my
good woman. I merely mentioned
them. 1t is really no matter We have
no record that the Hindoos had any
thing whatsoever to eat with their
rice. I am almost certain they took it
straight. You see the Hindoos-but 1
must not take up your time with these
benighted children of the jungle Let
US pass rapidly for a moment to the
Chinese. From the time of Confucius
down to Ii Hung Chang the Chinese
have subsisted upon rice-with an oc-
casional pull at the opium pipe.
Through cycles and cycles of. time has
the rattle of the chopsticks been heard,
and it has always been rice-rice-rice
stewed rice, boiled rice, rice always,
rice ever; rice till you can't rest. And
yet the Chinese have grown to be four
hundred million souls, so to speak.
Perhaps it was the MICE Cinnamon,
you know, are nightly fond of mice,
no matter how, the same may be serv-
ed. Now, for my own part. 1 never
could care for mice in that way. Could
your" p
| Ugh! the idea!"
Certainly not madam I might
have known that your delicate taste
would revolt at the mere suggestion.
And yet the Chiffese, who were pas
sionately fond of rice, looked upon
mice as even more of a delicacy To
| be sure, it may have been the cheap
ness OF rice which caused it to appeal
to the acknowledged iAsiatics, as it did
and as 1T does. There are few things
in the vegetable world which repro
duce and multiply themselves to so
great an extent. One bushel of ordin-
airy rice will reproduce itself to the ex-
tent Of eighty bushels Think of it,
And in our new possessions, the far-off
Philippine Islands, there is a variety
of rice which the great Admiral Dewey
says reproduces itself four-hundred-
field. All, madam, our Peace Commits
sioners are right. There is where we
must strike for the open door, Think
of it! Rice that reproduces itself four
hundred-foldl"
| 1T is truly wonderful" said the
lady
| 1T Is. And when we consider the
mere nothing that labor can be hired
for in these rice-growing regions-a
cent a week is a large wage-the cheap
ness of rice as a food product becomes
at once apparent. You have no cream,
I believe, you said %
No; I'm sorry"
Don't mention it, beg of you ]
might go into the statistics of rice and
appall you with the countless millions
of bushels and carloads of it that are
sent to our shores, where it is eaten
by people who profess to like it,
With this most gracious bow he hand
ed her back the cup Of rice, untouched
You are not going to eat it, then?''
No, thanks. If you had had a piece
of the aftermath I would have been
pleased to tackle some of the white
meat of that. But riceI draw the
line right there. If tramp Chinaman
comes along l would advise you to give
ii to him.
And he bowed himself out Of the
gate.-Trenton Times
Parsons and Women.