The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1899-12-03
w On Engagements.

ence of the young man, as Miss So-and-
So who hopes to be Mrs. So-and-So."
1t is just well when engaged peO-
pie do not live too near each other Late
ly, talking Of a certain young man, I hap
pencil to mention that he came over every
day to take tea with his fiancee. The
comment of an experienced woman who
heard the remark was, Every day? How
dreadful; that was as bad as being mar
RED! Still, If people are going to tire of
each other 1t is better that they should do
50 before rather than after marriage.
TWO BEARS" OF MARRIED LIFE.
A girl of my acquaintance was heard
sohoquizing thus-"I wonder if I should
tell all?" Nothing more dreadful than a
few Juvenile f1irtations were included in
this all, but my friend was thinking
whether she We're bound in honor to con-
TESS them to the young man to whom
she was engaged. Let us hope that he
absolved her as completely as did DR..
johnson when Mrs. Johnson confessed to
him before marriage. She thought it
right to tell him that one of her ancestors
had been hanged. The doctor said that If
none of his had been hanged. several of
them deserved to be. We pity people who
never have had any romance in their
lives and during the engagement period
illusions and day-dreamings are quite ex-
cUsable. Some of the castles built in the
air then may reach to heaven. No one
will be so good, so loving. and so useful
as they will be when they marry. Their
marriage will be q .complete success and
not single hitch in it. The only objec-
ucn to this is thatdif people fancy before
marriage comes that it is better than 1t
Is, when they are married they may think
that 1t Is worse than it is. This is what
Is meant when it is said that marriage
Is door that brings deIuded mortals back
parently unreasonable reaction is that
experience shows that matrimony has no
magic power of comforting happiness, but
that this must be earned by giving as
well as taking, by patient endurance,
seIf-restraint, and loving consideration
Tor the tastes and even for the faults OF
MN or her with whom life is TO BE- lived
When engaged think of this, I would
say, and let not the discovery come as
an unpleasant surprise after marriage.
There are two ways of acquiring wis
dcnl. We may get it cheaply by obsery-
ing the faults and foIltes of others and
trying u avoid them, or we may learn
1t from our own bitter experience Let
engaged people observe ard reflect upon
the matrimonial successes and failures
they see around them, and they will dis
cover that domestic bliss does not come
from having large house, servants,
horses, and so forth. but from having in
home, whether large or small two
bears and from paying attention to
two first things. The bears" of course
are bear and and forbear, the spirit Of
self-sacrif1ce and of liberation, and the
two first things are the first quarrel and
the first year of married life A poor
girl who had got black eye was asked
how she got it. She answered From nv
sweetheart" and then added, 'he could
not have done more if he had been mar
ried to me- Some engaged people quar-
rel almost as much as If they were mar
rted. This Is bad, for 1t forms the habit
Of nagging and trying to get the last
word. 1t may be said that engaged people
speak to each other with their eyes, and
with their mouths only when they are
married. We hope that they do, and
that some Of them will not use their
tongues too much afterwards The first
year of married life Is more important
than any, or perhaps than all that follow.
1t might be called what the fifth PROPOSE
ton of the first book Of Euclid IS called
the Ass Bridge" A lady said lately,
in my hearing, in order to account for the
unhappiness she had suffered in married
life, "Oh, We began all wrong. The best
thing we can wish those of our readers
who are going to be married Is that they
may begin all right and not all wrong.
Next Week:
Some Famous Love Affairs"