davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
JOKER IN LONDON.
American Complains That City
knock Out His Humor.

An American in London asks a ques-
ton. saws the illustrated News"
Il wish you would tell me what is gone
with the frolicsome humor l brought here
from my native land. You are real white
men in this city, but you are so powerful
sad. adj that tells on the range TN ne
feels he might as well be an Owl, Out at
Colorado Springs l was the most Duoyanl
man in the country. Here don't puoy
worth a cent. I've got no more laugn IN
me now than a mummy. INT nfSt stroke
nf business / did here l was so pleased
with that 1 wanted TO tell the other man
the story of the tin-roofed cocktail. You
should lave seen his face. He SAID ne
didn't listen to stories in business hours.
| went to q club, a regular palace. a mag
ni6cent hall. full of busts, and l salus \
must tell somebody that story or l snan
die There was an old gentleman on z
settee. 1 said, Have you ever neaTo
the story of the tin-roofed cocktail! ne
that a cocktail Is a drink? fou are, 90
MIN ~ said: you may bet every dollar
on ii. And / had just started a real I'VE
laugh when he spoiled everything with,
sThen YOU mustn't talk about drinks IN
this hail. Snakes and ln]uns! Row can l
ever laugh again? | won't tell you the
story of the tin-roofed cocktail ror YOU
never nut it in. Certainly not: rms
column: like the hall of the Mausoleum, IS
no place for drinks. !.
But my correspondents grievance IS
real ENOUGH. There is a kill-joy solemn
nify in our fine island decorum. We can
nor even discuss holiday recreations with
OUT an awful sense of responsibility.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
IRISH ALDERMEN.
Queer esults of Elections Held un-
der the New Local Government Act.

2
The result of the recent elections in
ireland, held under the new local gov
eminent act, has worked some queer
changes in the municipal governments
of Irish cities. Everywhere there were
victories for the Labor party. Instead
of rich landlords being elected to gov
ern the cities, men occupying the most
humble positions have been selected
william Shaw, one of the wealthiest
millers in Ireland, was defeated for
alderman by a drayman in his own en-
ploy earning $3.50 a week Maurice
Leonard, the Earl of Kenmare's agent.
O. ground landlord and hitherto dictator
of his town, was defeated, while the
first place on the poll was taken by
one of Leonard's day laborers earning
$2.25 a week.
Similar instances abound in all parts
of the country. Cork has returned two
'~.jarveys," one an alderman, the other
a councillor, who ply for hire every day
in the streets with their outside" or
covered" cars, according to the state
of the elements
One Of these, Alderman O'Connor, is
a man of keen intelligence, comfortably
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
Moral value 81 a Queen.

In addition to a political there is also
a clear moral grain in the fact that the
constitutional throne is filed by a woman.
1t cannot be doubted that the court of a
Queen makes more obviously for humanity
and for mortality than does that of a
King. AT the present time, 1t is true,
most of the European monarchs ave a
singularly good record. and some of them
are clearly on a higher level than the
average of their subjects. All are humane
men, some are even men of austere NOR
atty, and the Presidents of the two great
republics of the world are embodiments
of the hpmely virtues which are the bull
Warks of national strength. But we can
notforget that it has not always been SO,
nay, that it was not so but a few years
ago; the world has not forgotten the
orgies of Louis Napoleon or of the great
galantuomo of the house of Savoy, and it
knows that what has been may easily be
again. But it is impossible today for the
first lady of any land not to be a force
making for morality, it is impossible for
her TO be other than a woman of purity
of life, and SO an example to the nation.
We pardon Victor Emmanuels armours
Tor at least we overlook them) for the
sake OF his own courage and devotion;
but no pardon could or would be extended
to a woman on the throne who had lapsed
from virtue or had yer given reasonable
occasion for the tongue of scandal. Who
will deny that this is a great gain for the
great sovereignty of q crowned repub-
lic3,
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
KING OF GRIZZLIES.
How the Monarch of Heart Butte
Was Finally Brought Down.

How the Monarch of Heart Butte
Was Finally brought Down.
Far UP toward the Canadian border, on
the east flank Of the Rockies, stands a
great pile OF lime and slate rock which,
from its shape, the Indians named Heart
butte. This was the home of the great
chief of the grizzly bears, and the Indians
were mortally afraid Of him.
There was a half breed living inst be-
yond the borders of the reserve a ed La
Fargo. AS his name implies, he was part
French, the other half Cree-a very bad
mixture, indeed. La Fargo had come from
the far north, where he had been employed
in hunting and trapping for the Hudson
Bay company many years. Living SO near
the reservation, he could not help but hear
of the grizzly chief, and in a moment of
enthusiasm, produced by a bottle of rum,
he declared he would go forth and, single
handed, the destruction of the
bear, even were he big as a mountain.
The laughter which greeted his boast made
him angry, and forthwith he offered to
bet, then and there, ten beaver skins he
had against $50 that on May l he would
go up to the abode of this bear and inside
of ten days return with its hide. The bet
was promptly taken by sheep herder and
the stakes were placed in the storekeeper's
hands. 'sI'm tell you, Z said La Fargo, as
he reeled out of the door and waved his
half empty bottle triulmphantly in the air
I'm tell you I'm win that bet. I'm greet
huntair, me. I'm keel heem tousand bears.
Nevair one he escape"
A few days later La Fargo and family
were seen heading for the mountains.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18

h1lllNG M 0ttlLLLl LIN
where he built q log pen with a ~trapdoor,
in which he planned to catch the griz-
ely king.
One night some ~neighboring prospectors
heard a wild cry from La Farge's pen and
FASTENED with their guns to investigate
the mystery.
They had no difficulty in finding the
pen-that is to say. what was left of it
for one corner was broken out and the
roof was slanting at a steep angle toward
the opening. In the far corner they saw
the carcass of a bighorn, and behind that
the form of La Fargo.
La Fargo wasn't much inclined to talk,
but by much questioning they learned
that he had dragged a bighorn down the
mountain and into the pen and was just
finishing tying the door string to one of
it's legs when he hoard a slight noise and,
looking over his shoulder, saw the chief
grizzly standing half within the doorway.
In his fright he let go of the string, and the
heavy gate fell on the bear, causing it to
leap clear in, and that was the last he re-
membered. The prospectors knew the
rest. Evidently the pen had given way at
the first assault of the angry and fright
ened bear.
La Fargo did not eat supper with The
miners that night, and when they got up
betimes the next morning they saw him
and his outfit just passing o u of sight
around the bend of q distant hill.
Still another evening, while the pros
pectors were eating their supper, they saw
chief grizzly nosing and paving about
the deserted camping place of he half
breed. Taking their rifles and cautiously
approaching the SPOT, they succeeded in
getting within go or 70 yards Of him. As
the almost simultaneous reports of their
guns rang out the old fellow slowly sank
to the ground, his muscles twitched a lit
tie, and all was over.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18

When General Lord Wolseley received
his famous order to march to the relief
of Khartum within 70 hours, he ordered
a camel saddle for himself. Finding that
the order had reached only the inspect
or generals Office in "a hours. Lord
Wolseley hired and paid a native sad
die maker, who worked overtime and
made the saddle. Meanwhile the official
order for the saddle went on in the reg
ular order of business, and six years
afterward his lordship was astonished
to receive the saddle, together with one
peck OF correspondence relating thereto.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18

good and unfailing supply Of water, or in
q new made cellar will bring prosperity
to the household" etc. The Massachu-
sets station has made an investigation Of
the habits, food and economic value of the
American toad which dispels these falla-
cious ideas and at the same time estab-
fishes the claim of the little animal to u
consideration and appreciation. One toad
saves $50 a year to tho farmer, and this
helps one to determine his worth, for if he
attends strictly to business during his Is
years of life the toad's value must of ne
cessity be $8co.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
BURIED STRONG BOX.
UNCLE SAM PUTS s69.ooo,ooo INTO
A HOLE IN TIE GROUND.
Row the Silver Reserve Ii Being
Stored In the Basement of the I'm
finished New Philadelphia Mint.
Precautions which Make 1t Safe.

In a hole in the ground the govern
ment is putting So. 900, 600 silver dollars.
The hole is in the city of Philadelphia
and is intended for the basement Of the
new mint which is being constructed
there. Building a mint is a slow proc
ess, however. You cannot slap up a
mint in the offhand manner that a city
contractor puts up a row Of tenements
on a rush order.
But the government is short of strong
boxes. 1t needs more space for its
money. So the basement of the new
mint is being used as a storage place
for this small mountain of silver dol
lars before there is even a suggestion of
the stout walls which are to rise
above 1t.
This $685. 0o, 900 is the reserve fund
which the Sherman law requires to be
kept on hand to redeem all the silver
notes which are in circulation. When
you find among your money silver GER
tificates, just remember hat the silver
coins which those notes represent are
stored in this Philadelphia hole in the
ground. Philadelphia would be a fine
PidCc 1Ol d SlltSI lHiAlCI I PiOSPCtS IA
just now. If allowed to locate over the
mint basement, he would strike such a
pay streak as was never struck before.
The process of moving the silver from
the old mint to the basement of what is
to be the new one is now well under
way. For a long time men lave been
working to get the money in shape for
it's journey. 1t must be counted and
weighed and put into anvas bags and
sealed and marked with the lame of
the workman and hen placed in a
wooden box and nailed down and stem
ciled and carried away to a storeroom,
where it Is to remain until moving day
comes. Six men at their best can only
handle about 81, $780, 600 a week.
Only lately has this double precau-
ton of bag inc box been used as a
covering for the mint moneys. Some
trouble caused in one of the minis by
the breaking of canvas and the escape
of money in a vault suggested that an
other security was advisable, n these
millions of silver dollars must be pro-
tected from moth and rust all the more
carefully because they are to lie for
years in their vault and not be taken
out until nobody knows when.
AS may be imagined, the United
States government has not planned to
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18

brought him ashore. Bicycle Pc .eman
Bremen and several attendants helped to
drag out the divers limp body.
Eight feet of water, the depth of the
water in the tank at Madison Square Gar
den, was ample for Donaldson, although
he was to dive sheer So feet. But the sue
cess Of the feat depends upon entering the
water with the body curved. The divers
hands, upon contact with the water, de-
scribe a quick upward arc, which, with
the bend In the back, brings the diver
quickly to the surface. For some reason
which cannot be ascertained Donaldson
took a straight dive, neglecting at the
proper moment to make the saving bend
His head therefore struck the bottom of
the tank with but comparatively little Of
the force of gravity broken by the water.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
RicAN BRlGANDAGE
An Industry which Does Not Flour
ixh Under Uncle sam.

a. rnar.+xv whscb noes Not Faour-
-. r,.aa. u.a.. s,,,
: ne uea0lA nci, u plis.s1iuase - -
hico Was sounueu Whoi oao Aiicioan
troops ianuea as 0uanica iasu suiiiniel.
Up 10 thav eiile prasasius 'lau peen soe,se.
NOW Iews Il any, feinain. oihco cary iasO
nua says ene New IofA pun, V,ieic
mas peen no ,nuieselon wnaeesel y 0ae
exisoence' unu tne psi',. en'.' iiauo { -
ieses,ion uisn was neilesou ~ 70 y ~ Its
one onaD hau not see quie business
experiences ~ ma u occasion mus SUI - :
siScourase y. lug urls''lus ls.u N $500
pegun upe1aolons .na VI mas 4 =
.he iailiesiy pose ~ $50 ~ -
a squau u snarpslioo,els oae -
Sesenvn iscw losA ,llsA "as ~.
uiaoely oe'sllieu " = = aioor olieil
soiuiers soon eai'le " WIZ on een IN opsl,
ca afe. ~ prisahus wele e ~
~ enc .lle AMY ata were n.aiu nnnias rrh;ah
5nmllo i9o.ou .ieole Tha.. hasaeasn ~
lol.o Mloo 9aasSs~ $500 +ha,n 80
oap1u' ouS y Nus 49, $500 bo.s
~ rs laoS Snas az aasa @ maw
aln,ssn ON. GIN a,ah .s;nnI 49, az IA
SUaui m Wi nsan ~
Spniisa oisii go
the word, not merely petty malefactors,
but robbers, kidnapers, cutthroats and
footpads. They waylaid travellers, levied
blackmail on planters, pillaged homes,
killed for pay and even made descents
upon villages for booty. Some of them
made q speciality OF removing hated per-
sons, receiving for their services sums
ranging from 500 to $500, according to
the financial ability OF the person hiring
them and the prominence of the intended
victim or his fighting ability. The people
Of Porto Rico tell oda with q certain pride
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
DlTINGDOVN TO DEATH
How a Miscalcuiation Cost Dom
aldson His Life.
4 PLUNGE OF FrFTT-TWo FEET.

Y1
Struck In a Tank Containing but
Eight Feet of Water and Failed to
Make the Curve Necessary For
safety.
Tom Donaldson, the daring diver whose
leap from the roof girders Of Madison
Square Garden, in New York, was the
thrilling feature of the s~portsmen's show,
fractured his skull in his final performance
and died from the effects of the injury Q
few days afterward.
Donaldson's dive was arranged as a CHI
max to the aquatic exhibitions, and on
the occasion Of the calamity the spectators
gave him q cordial welcome as he took his
position to make the plunge Of SO feet
"Are you ready?" the u shout
ed in tones that filed every corner Of the
amphitheater. In response the diver
Strengthened himself to his full height,
lifted his hands above his head, and bend
ing slightly forward leaped. There were
a few subdued screams from tilnid women.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
CENSUS DIRECTOR.
Ehe Man Who VIII Boss the Job OF
Counting U.s..


William r. Merriam, the newly APP
pointed census director, is an ex-gov-
ernor of Minnesota and a successful ST.
Paul business man. He has no peculiar
qualifications which mark him as the
most suitable mar to boss the job OF
counting the millions who live within
Uncle SANS territory. In fact, it would
be rather difficult to find a man who
has such qualifications.
But William Rush Merriam is a man
of much executive ability, and he is de-
serving Of some return from the adj
ministration because he worked hard to
secure President McKinley's nominal
ton and election. Mr.. Merriam was
born at Wadham's Mills, Essex coun-
ty, N. Y, just so years ago next July.
His parents removed to st. Paul when
he was IL years old, and ne has made
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18

ed on four legs on rollers and bearing a
rudely shaped head and tail. In 1861 a
Salem soldier, for too much roistering
while in drink, was sentenced to ride
this uncomfortable machine. In Revolu-
tionary times it was a favorite punish
ment and was even used occasionally as a
civil penalty. Oftentimes permanent in
jury to the culprit resulted from this sort
of punishment, at least n death being
recorded in colonial times caused by rid
ing the wooden horse.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18

once witnessed a phase of prompt
evolution of practical and devotional re-
ligion in Scotch sheepdogs on a commun-
ion Sabbath among the mountains. The
churchyard was crowded with shepherds,
accompanied by their dogs, which lay
quietly asleep at the feet of their las
tiers. The sermon was finished. the
psalm had been sung. the final prayer was
being offered, and there was no sign OF
impatience; but the moment the benedic-
ton commenced, the devotional doggies
all reused themselves and before the
amen they were in marching order
From ssNewman Hail." an Autobiogra-
ply.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
The First STEM.

well, = announced Mr.. Perkasie to his
wife, John and Mary have taken the first
step coward divorce"
you dom mean to tell me! What on
earth is the matter"
tThey have got married. "-Harper's
Bazaar.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
The Suiaan.a -sIrthday.

According to the London STANDARD.
the Sultan's birthday really fell on Thurs
day, but. owing to the'e eclipse Of the moon
on Wednesday, the court astroIoger ad-
vised that IT should be kept on Friday. as
the day following an eclipse would be I'M
propitious.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
star Eonrders, BOASTS.

1--WE had strawberry shortcake at our
boarding house for dinner last night, =
said one mealer to another.
"Pooh!" replied the latter, ssyour land
lady can't get ahead of Mrs. Hashcroft.
We had omelet for breakfast every morn
ing during the egg famine. ,-Pittsburg
Chronicle Telegraph.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
FISH and SNAKE YARNS
Strange Stories old by a West
ern Ananias Club.
HAMPTON HYpNoTIzING TROUT
How a Huge salmon Went bounding
Like a Kangaroo the
Fields-A Snake Too Dainty to XIII
a Rat.

st. Louis has an Ananias club worthy
Of tho name. The Post Dispatch quotes
r. F. Philips, a member1n good and reg
ular standing, as follows:
cit was my good fortune several sum-
mers ago to be staying at the same resort
inSgirginia with General Wade Hampton.
Charming man, splendid companion, that
General Hampton! We grew very fond OF
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18

Some turned away
their heads as the diver
sped downward. No
skillful turn of the
hands marked Donald
sons contact with the
water. AS he struck
the POOLS surface his
body was perfectly
perpendicular, and the
velocity with which he
travelled made it al
most certain that he
would reach the bot
tom unless he turned
quickly.
Seconds that seemed
minutes elapsed, and
after the first ripple
there was no sign from
the diver. Announcer
Harvey was the first
to realize the danger.
"Fetch him out!''
he yelled. No move
was made by the spec
tators at the end OF
the tank in which
Donaldson had disap-
peared, but Frank ID.
Spohn, one of the dec
orators of the build
ing, jumped from hif
chair in the Indianvil-
lage and quickly ran
along the narrow
wooden border of the
tank. His coat was off,
and without a mo
ment's hesitation he
plunged in. Spohn il
no expert diver, and
he failed to discover
trace of Donaldson.
The excitement grew
into q panic, and the
alarm reached Harry
Reeder, the Knicker'
booker Athletic clut
champion swimmer,
who stood talking al
the soda water foun'
tain. The trained ath'
lete took in the situa'
tion at q glance, dash
ed through the trem'
bling spectators
throwing off his coat
as be ran. He leaped
to the side and diyeo
out to the middle Of
the tank. Lying prone
at the bottom he dis
covered al L
and. assisted by Spohn
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
JUSTICE TO ToADs.
Uncle Sam omciaIIy Extols til
Do4eatrodAen Race.

The United States department of agri-
culture states that from the earliest times
the toad has been associated in the popular
mind with vague and ludicrous fancies as
to its qualities, such as THAT
touching toads will produce warts on the
hands; that killing toads will produce
bloody milk in COWS; that a toad's breath
will cause commissions in children; that a
toad in a newly dug well will insure a
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
wbat VIM he Do yvfth ItY

A Chinaman named Teo Kia WAS today
charged with stealing q tongkang loaded
with baloo.-Singapore Free Press.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-03-18
Furnishing DRUNEARDS
Some Ingenious Devices Of Old
Puritan Days.
BEER ONLY ONE CENT A QUART.
First Specific Legislation Against
I-ntoxfcation In ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
initiation of Barrel Shirts and
wooden Horses.

From the early records of the Massa-
chusetts Bay and New Plymouth colonies
it is clearly shown that every device and
scheme, every safeguard and penalty, for
dealing with i~nebriates was anticipated
by our fathers save one-the legal prohi-
bition of the sale of intoxicating liquors
was never attempted or even suggested.
Indeed, says the Boston Herald, it is
significant that the pilgrim fathers
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1899-05-01
AT THE BARNS.

At present only three deputy United
States marshals are On guard at the
barns. They are Regular Deputy Koon,
who is acting as chief deputy in the
absence of Deputy Randolph, and two
special deputies. The rest of the dep
uties have not been sent home. but
they have been transferred from the
barns to another point, not far away,
and are keeping in perfect touch with
the situation. 1t was learned last night
that Deputy Koon severely criticised
the special deputy, who figured in Sat
urday mornings affair on Fourteenth
street and sent him to his home at
Clarksburg during the day.
The special deputy told Deputy Koon
that he was crossing Market street
when a wagon came along and that he
checked the horse for the reason that
he thought the driver intended to run
over him.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1899-05-01

lowed ind 81 alonx fhe nne threw
bad eggs decayed potatoes. sticks, TN
cans and other sorts Of missiles at the
retreating Individual. Officer Fisher
met the fleeing passenger at the station
and escorted him to Moundsville car.
in which were two passengers. negro
and Chinaman. These two men de-
serted the car at once, saying that they
feared the crowd would make an at
tack.
About 1920 o'clock in the morning
a Wheeling man, in state of intoxi-
cation, alighted from car at the ter
minus of the line. He was evidently
hunting for trouble. for he walked up to
a group of quiet individuals and accused
them of having called him names.
Later he was arrested by Officer Fisher
and will have to give an account of
himself before Mayor Thomas Shep-
pard this morning.
During the morning two Cinnamon,
who stood waiting for car, were told
not to ride. When the car stopped,
one Chinaman Joined the ranks of the
strike sympathizers, while the other
boarded the car and lay down on the
floor, saying that he guessed no one
could hurt him there.