Daily inter mountain. [volume] (Butte, Mont.) 1881-1901, 1899-01-18
"Shut that door, Constable Newton"

out Of the corner he was full of fight.
And he could fight, too, in a rough-and-
tumble fashion, and for a time gave the
alderman all he could do; but in the end
science, in the shape of singing left and
right handlers, we'll placed, and clever
sparring, blocking and ducking won.
OVerfield was not the only sufferer, for
he landed some vicious swings. which the
alderman felt. There was lively hitting
for a minute or so, and then Overfield,
finding he could not land, clinched. and
the two fell to the floor. The alderman
was just. as scientific a wrestler as a
boxer, n a strange hold soon took all
the breath and fight out Of the wife
heater.
His honor never does things by halves.
however, and, having studied the symp-
toms of wife-beating for % years, he sat
on the prisoner and pommelled him right
heartily, administering the proper dose
and a little extra for good measure.
When he at length paused to hear Over
fields cries for mercy, the prisoner was
quite ready to swear by all that was sa-
cred that he would never lay a heavy
finger on his wife again.
III you do, -" said the alderman; and
then, In the midst Of profuse protesta-
tons of good behavior, he discharged the
prisoner.
All of the spectators except one enjoyed
the light immensely. The exception was
1oN AVN i "IlOSc vi van WdlI-
ing to tell how he had beaten her.
David" said his honor, not unkindly.
this is your first offense. Was the les
son You have just learned one you will
remember? If it is you can go home.
David went hastily.
The first time 1 thrashed a wife-beat-
er,' said Mr.. Donohue, was in 1888. He
was a. vicious fellow, and had nearly
killed his wife. He got it worse than
Overfield did, for l laid him up for a week
or two. 1t did him good. Yes. sir. He's
been a mighty good husband ever since.
Il had another several years ago. This
was my third. I got letters from all over
the world about my first case, and felt
proud of some of them. One French So
ciety wrote me about it. l never heard.
though, whether they adopted my meth
Cd. They can if they want. 1t is not
patented.
rive just got q letter from a Philadel-
phia man about Overield. The mans
name is E. S. Clark, and he sent me his
book, Mental Nuts to Crack Wonder
what kind of business he thinks 1 am in.
He says in his letter:
Good boy, Donohue! Do 1t again! I
wish 1 was there to see it,
Ten years ago, when I thrashed the
first one, some nerve medicine firms sent
me letters asking to be allowed to use
my name and picture and say under it,
I use So-and-So Nervine and thrash
wife-beaters.' I'm no advertising agen-
cy, though"
HOW HE FIRST BECAME FAMOUS.
The alderman first became famous by
an interesting settlement of an intricate
case When he was young in office. Two
Irish women had a lawsuit over a goose.
Both claimed 1t, and each produced ten
witnesses to testify that it was hers.
The evidence on each side was most di-
| reCf ana 1n61SnJr1 hta Eanh TON i3o~t;
fled the goose as belonging to the woman
they represented. They all knew the
goose from the time it was a gosling.
After hearing the evidence the alderman
said to the prosecutriX:
Have you a gander?"
'TrOth, an Oh have, an a fOine wan at
that"
The alderman put the same question to
the defendant, Indignantly.
Whose gander did the goose keep COM
pany WITH" asked the alderman, seeing
the end in sight.
"'Twas moine," exclaimed each woman.
well, bring them both to court this
afternoon" ordered the alderman.
The women protested.
You won't?' said the alderman, "then
I Will" and he issued a subpoena for each
gander, and in due time they came in,
borne by two triumphant constables.
The alderman ordered everybody out to
a big field, and the crowd that gathered
there numbered about five hundred.
Donohue sent the two ganders to separ-
ate corners of the field, in charge of the
cOnstables, and he stood with the goose
in the middle of the field, with the crowd
behind him. When all was ready his
honor released the goose. The disputed
bird ambled slowly to one gander, exam
ined him for a moment, and then went
over to the other. After a few chucklings
they waddled down under the fence to-
gether and padded into a brook.
THAT settles it, cried the alderman.
"WhOse gander is that?"
1.-The prosecutor's!" shouted back the
constable.
Case decided in prosecutors favor;
defendant will pay all the costs" said the
alderman, and the crowd cheered.
On another occasion twins We're born in
a family supplied by a milkman with a
quart of milk a day. 1t was a remote
route, and no other went near
1t. The supply of this particular dealer
was limited. and when the family re-
quired three pints extra for the twins he
would not supply it. The father COM
planned to the alderman. Donohue had
him swear out a warrant for the milk
man. When that worthy appeared his
honor aid You'll supply that house
with milk if you lave to build a pipe line,
or you'll deal with me-" The milkman,
rather frightened, said he would try.
There will be no try about it," ex-
claimed Donohue. Those babies must
be fed. and, VIA is more, you'll make a
daily report to me that you've delivered
the milk" And the milkman did.
THE COAL WAS SLATY.
A coal company was sued for docking a
miner on the charge that the coal he sent
to the breaker was dirty. The coal COM
pany's lawyer claimed that the coal was
not marketable if it had more than 5 per
cent of slate, and the company never sold
| Gall n,-inn 49, nnnnIrnt H. 49, q,