The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1899-07-30
HE DIDN'T GET THE "RISK."
Insurance Solicitor Who Met His
Match and More.
Chicago Tribune.

Chicago Tribune.
.Is this Mr.. Gwilliams?" inquired the
caller, SNUG parsonage Of Self-posSessed
bearing and business-like aspect, addressing
himself to the somewhat angular elongated
man seated at the roll-topped desk.
Yes sir"
"Glad to know you, Mr.. Civilians My
name is Scorjel-Godfrey Scorjel. L see you
are busy, and am not the man to take up
another mans time without some good
reason for 1t. Are you carrying all the life
insurance you want. Mr.. Gwilliams"
Yes, SIR
Eyes? 1 represent the Unpuncturable
Mutual Life Association, a company, Mr.
Civilians, that combines the stability Of the
old line insurance organizations with the
economy of the fraternal insurance orders
1t guarantees to furnish absolutely reliable
protection at actual cost. We pay no fancy
| salaries, Mr.. Civilians, The officers of the
Unpuncturable. Mr. Civilians
Your family well, Mr.. Scorjel?'
"Oh, yes, thanks. As / said We furnish
the best insurance at actual cost. What Is
your age, Mr.. Gwilliams?"
my age? Well, suppose you put 1t down
at thirty"
HIM. should have guessed you were
considerably over that. However, on the
basis of-let me see-here it is-at thirty il
would cost you on the 81, 900 only $780, Mr..
Civilians. Figuring on the basis of-of for
a year, or little over $50 a year on 5000
1 defy the world, Mr.. Civilians, to equal
do you belong to any church, Mr..
Scorjel?"
mo. I'm not exactly a member. 1 attend
GnuJcn 9resy rs s HAT of oeeve
taken the applications of hundreds of
church members. In fact, the Unpunctura-
say, of insurlng that kind of people. 1t
pays bigger dividends. Mr.. Civilians, than
any company
What is you first name, Scorjel?"
Godfrey"
"Oh, yes: l remember you over in Nc
CcnEellsville, or"
Handsome old town. Some Of the best
people i have known came from Neon
nellsville. IL ever you have the chance.
Mr.. Scorjel, you must visit McConnellsville,
without fall
YES 1 certainly will How much life in
surance did you say you were carrying. Mr..
Il didn't say, Mr.. Scorjel. I said 1 was
carrying all the life insurance 1 wanted 10
carry Mr.. Scorjel."
II know of course how Ii always strikes
a man when anybody talks life insurance to
him. If he's asked straight up and down
if he wants any insurance nine times out
of ten ne says he doesn't But when I can
get man TO listen for just few minutes
while 1 show him how much better our plan
by the way, Mr.. Scorjel, did you ever
take up oxygen as special study"
Il can't say L ever did"
It's a wonderful fascinating subject. The
air We breathe, Mr.. Scorjel, as you may be
aware, IL composed of about twenty-one
parts oxygen and seventy-nine parts hydro
gen with every breath You draw Won cause
the air TO lose about per cent. of its oxy-
gen. If we suppose you breathe twenty
six cubic inches OF air at each Inspiration
and breathe eighteen times a minute, you
cause 46S cubic inches of air TO pass through
your lungs every minute, and in an hour
you vitiate-let me figure a little-you
vitiate. Mr. Scorjel. quantity of air equal
To-
1T wouldn't take me two minutes. Mr..
Civilians. to"
But passing by the mere question of
figures, Mr.. Scorjel. let us consider oxygen
In it's relation To the blood. The oxygen is
taken up by the lungs and carried off In
the arterial circulation. imparting to the
blood in the process the bright red color"
Now, there's no use of your trying TO
have fun with me. Mr.. Civilian"
II don't like to mention il. Mr.. Scorjei,
but you have been chewing wooden tooth
pick ever since you came in. / may be I'M
duly fastidous, but the habit offends me.
A man who goes around chewing a tooth
pick-thanks: you look better now-wil run
lis arm behind girls elbow and grab her
hand i'm his as he walks along the street
with her"
Then, I suppose, Mr.. Civilians. it's no
use to-"
Not the least In the world. Mr.. ScorJel.