New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1899-07-28
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

months ago wrote her name ana ADDRESS on
piece Of cotton. The other day she received let
ter from a woman in Arizona, who said that the
cloth had been bought by Uncle Sam, and was
beIng cut I'D for garments in a school for the
Apache Indians there. 1t was but few years ago
that the Apaches were taking scalps Instead OF
making shirts.
Friendly suggestion-.Tm afraid III nave b 5e
WHAT'S the trouble now" inquired his friend
''r6e kitchen chimney smokes dreadrfuly'" re-
piled Smith. and I'm unable 10 stop H. .c,v. .,
one OF those cigars like you gave me YESTERDAY,
and it's 10 70 i, shot I VIII quit smoking OIL It's
The Chicago Penny Savings Society. operating
through the public school teachers last year re-
ceived from the school children of that city over
$40 900 This means that at least $4,000 less year
is being spent for candy and chewing gum ana
that over 1000 children becoming capitalists at
the rate OF FIVE cents day.
UNCLE PAUL.
Is It true that you have quit
Can It be you've lost your grit,
Oh. we're THf plunged usdi in deepest gloom.
II we've lost our dea- old Dom
Are you in the has beens' tomb.
Uncle Paul?
Was II done with British gold.
Uncle Paul?
Were you bought or were you sold,
Uncle Paul?
We will wait until we hear
Choking back the bitter tear
That they've laid you on your bier.
cleveland Plain Dealer.
Kent County. Md. has peach tree that is be-
Iieved by State Entomologist w. c. Johnson to be
the largest tree in the United States. The tree is
on the farm OF Allen Harris. on Eastern Neck
Island and Is Of the Crawford variety. 1t has a
full crop of peaches this year. and has never failed
to bear a crop since it began growing. 1t measures
81 inches in circumference and % inches in dame
ter Three Of the limbs are % inches. 20 inches and
30 inches In circumference respectively II Is sell
dom that the large trees are the best bearers. but
the case OF this Maryland giant proves TO be an
exception.
Nothing Else Would Excuse TITS perfectly
lovely story" she exclaimed. SO exciting. you
girl was out on the lake in a and thrown
out OF It, and before she could reach 1t again the
The canoe sunk?". he returned incredulously;
Went right to the bottom she anSwer ere The
it and keep herself afoat. The whole story hinges
WHAT tait was in the canoe?' he asked.
"N95hiR f made at sll Of iron replied
"of course not 1t was birch bark canoe"
And the canoe sunkY he repeated again. Say
what yGp s been saap ss p2s5SS isn't w
Wen, can't think Of ANYTHING but poetical
snk."-(Chcago Post
Excitement is frequently the cause Of strange
kilograms as we'll Of other strange manifesto
tons A man who had been Of the passengers
on a shipwrecked vessel was rescued almost by
miracle. On arriving at place from which ne
could send a Geographic message he forwarded
the following dispatch TO his brothers II am saved
Try to break II to my wife"
Disgraced.-'Did you know our horse baked yes
co. ciousr What did Won do?"
"Hitched an automobile to him and dragged him
home. "-tlndianapohs journal
The new cars to be used on the interurban line
between ST. Paul and a small place named Still
water will be unique in their equipment. They will
have compressed air for brakes and whistles. to
be suppled by a small motor operating an air
pump. The air whistles will be used In the coun-
try where the cars will be run at high rate Of
speed. Each also will be equipped with tele-
phone, with fifty feet OF wire and a switch plug
At intervals OF quarter OF mile there will be
places where the conductor can cut In the tele-
phone wire between 81. Paul and Saltwater, and
communicate with the power house barn.
Not What He wanted.-Nurse-Irs time for your
nourlshment now, Mr. Peppery.
Mr.. Peppery Cwho IL convalescent)-Hang nour-
ishment! What want is something TO eat.-Gudy
Herman ". Cramer. Missouri boy with the
troops In Porto Rico, writes OF a laundress who
has taken the contract 10 do all OF his laundry
at 81 20 a month. and says: She was not pleased
with the rundown corners or my straight UP coll
lars. and for fear they would not lie down she
sewed them"
Bracng Himself for the Kick-"Some men are
hard to suit, remarked the real estate agent. after
a customer had left. THAT man, now, will como
back here in a week two and tell me have
swinded him. although I've sold him a suburban
lot at half price"
What VIII he complain about? asked the once
lounger.
Hen kick because when told him he would be
within twenty minutes ride OF the city didn't tell
him he'd have TO walk thirty minutes no reach bis
EaH"-lGhtsseo Trlbunes -