The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1899-06-25
n T TINS season Of the year. when


the business or professional world.
fair degree of accuracy until it comes
to shopping, and then he is a storm
tossed soul in a leaky bark on faith
omless sea, or. anyway. that's how he
feels about it. He would scorn caste
and welcome the friendly aid of the old
apple woman at the corner or the col
ored dame who scrubs out the office IL
he could hope for assistance from Ell
ther under such circumstances.
His misery begins generally some
thing like this: AS he starts for the Of
flee some morning his wife hands him
small piece of silk at parting, saying:
Here. William, take this and get II
matched for me. With the sewing wo-
man here this week, / have no time to
go to town myself, and you can get it
for me just as well as not. / got this
last year at Snipem & Snipem's bargain
sale, so don't know whether they viii
have any just like it, but go around
until you find it. want three-quarters
of yard, and it ought not to be more
than IS cents a yard"
All this sounds like explicit advice.
AS he is in a hurry to catch a train.
William grabs the silk and rushes Off.
When he gets on the train, he takes
out the scrap and looks at IL. 1t is a
shade of blue. and, although all blues
look alike TO him, even he has a vague
impression that there is something
queer about that particular specimen.
He shows it to man who sits next to
him and asks him what color he would
call il. The man says blue at once, and
then he looks at IL again and says pur-
pile and finally wants to call il a green
ish. reddish. purplish. yellowish blue.
which is only the diplomatic masculine
way of admitting defeat. The subur-
banite understands this and, signing,
puts his silk away.
Thinking he'd better. have It OF his
mind at once. the business man takes
his sample right up to Snipem & Snip
ems. Business can wait. he says. A
lost customer or two will be nothing
compared TO Maria's Indignation If he
forgets TO bring the silk home at night,
and in the rush CT work during the day
he knows from bitter experience that
he is likely to overlook such commits
sionS.
The saleswoman takes the sample
and hauls out a number OF webs of
silk. The suburbanite looks relieved,
for to him they seem just what he
wants. They are all blue and all
queer looking blues. but when he puts
his bit of silk beside them he sees that
there is a difference.
ANY of these suit you. sir ?" demands
the saleswOman impatiently after he
has fingered and hesitated over them
for about 20 minutes.
I'm afraid none of these will suit
my Wife he says desperately. for the
best match is at least 20 degrees from
the color of his piece of silk. And as
he walks out of the store he can hear
the saleswoman exchanging sarcastic
comments with her neighbors and slap
ping the webs of silk back upon their
shelves.
When he reaches his office. the SUBJ
urbanite sinks YEARLY into his chair.
The trig young woman who operates
his typewriter for him hastily tucks
away a paper bound novel as she hears
his familiar foOtstep outside the door.
He comes in with a detected manner.
very red face and a perspiring brow.
The observant young woman knows at
once that something has gone wrong
and that it behooves her to attend to
business with great diligence. The sem
ior partner, the subsenior and the SUBJ
subsenior eye their colleague with dis
approval from their various glass in
cased dens.
out with the boys last night. Billy's
leetle gay. Business and dissi-
patton don't harmonize," grumbles the
senior over his specs.
All morning long the harassed sub
urbanite trembles in anguish as he
thinks of the cold scorn with which his
wife will greet his story OF failure. Once
he happens to look over toward his
typewriter and notices that she is Pc
rusing the fashion column of the daily
paper, and a glad thought seiZes him.
Could it be But, yes; she, too. is a
woman, With trembling and deferen-
tial voice he addresses her:
Miss McWhackem. I-er-do you
know anything about colors?"
Good gracious," replies Miss Nc
Whackem. looking, up from her news
paper. What a queer question for you
to ask. Mr.. Hackensack! OF course 1
do"
And do you know anything about
silks?" continues her employer.
Miss McWhackem, smoothing down
ner own chromonke plumage, modestly
says that she has seen a little silk in
her day.
but have you ever matched silk
really matched it, you know" persists
the doubling Mr.. Hackensack.
"Certainly-of course / have" an
swers Miss McWhackem. with natural
that her feminine, intelli
gence should be so deeply doubted
'Certainly-of course ! have. Mr.. Hack
ansack | amt some jay that was born
Nervously extracting the piece OF
silk from his pocket. Mr.. Hackensack
lays IL before his fair assistant and
waits with breathless anxiety as she
nspects It.
oh" exclaims Miss Mcwhackem
n recognition, its parvenche blue.
sn't it,"
Mr.. Hackensack's estimation Of Miss
attachments goes up 80
per cent. but h doesn't want her TO
know it, so he says careiessly:
My wife is busy. and she-er-asked
ne TO get her Jhree-qusrters Of yard
more UP al Snipem & Suipem's. ] went !
Up this morning. They showed me a
OF OF samples. but / vas 50 confused
.ouldn't quite make out which TO take ,
Now. Miss Mcwhackeu. II you could /
ell ne what ought to 90 ! VIII BE- IN 1
Ter obiiga tons tn you"
Miss McWhac KEN likes 20 shop. ara
he isn't going 10 let ar opportunity /
Ike this escape. so she says:
I'd be puGectly de-l-i-g-h-fed %. MI. I
Now. just look here 4
Tou gimme that piece Of silk and III go
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