The Worcester spy. [volume] (Worcester, Mass.) 1898-1904, 1899-11-14
SPANKING AS A COCKTAIL.

The New York Mail and Express has
appetizer that can be relied upon is a
spanking, that aside from it's being a
needful moral corrective at times, it
can also be made to serve scientific and
hygienic purposes of the very highest
Importance. They argue this upon the
results of the work performed by Mrs
Helen Litz of Chicago, whose story
they tell at great length and maintain
that her experiments have added
valuable contribution to the common
knowledge of the laws of health.
Mrs. Litz is afflicted with a husband
who for many years could scarcely eat
enough to keep body and soul toggetneri;
He was born without an appetlte ana
stroVe in vain to acquire one. lie tried
everything from codlver oil to saving
wood, but could never accumulate SUM
Client hunger to enable him TO enjoy
square meal His aversion to food not
only filled his wife with solicttude Tor MS
health, but 1t was an ungenerous renee
ton upon her cooking, which she resent
ed with considerable feeling BUT one Jay
an inspiration came to her. She remem-
bered that in her girlhood, mothers USED
to spank their little boys to stimulate
their appeuteS, ana tnal lHe Iiedtui y, n
never failed. Why not try it on Mr.. LitZ?
1t is painful TO speak of what happened
to that unfortunate person when ne came
home from the gas works in the evening,
was rudely seized, thrown across a
kitchen chair and treated to one of the
sultriest and most comprehensive spank
ings that man or boy ever received. Luz
objected but was promptly overruled by
his Wife who weighs 206 pounds to his l23
and who took the trouble to explain that
it was all for the benefit of his health.
The treatment worked like a charm Be
fore the patient went to bed that night
he ate a round steak couple of boiled
potatoes, three slices of bread, a dish of
rice and wound up by calling for pie.
The treatment was repeated before
breakfast the next morning in spite of
the husbands protest that he was hungry
enough already, and again IN the even
ing-both times with an old-fashioned.
broad-soled slipper which had seen bet
ter days. Then Mrs. Litz mapped out a
regular course, and twice day until the
police interfered she spanked Mr.. Litz
with all the zeal of an enthusiastic scien-
fist who has discovered great Things. her
husbands appetite grew prodig1ously and
he has ever since enjoyed his food as only
a healthy man can.
Mrs Litz's method of administering the
appetizing spank is distinctly novel. AT
first she used the customary slipper, but
after noting it's effect on the patient she
discarded that implement and began TO
purpose is a volume of Mr.. Bryans pub
lie addresses bound in leather, but she
has also produced excellent results with
Carlyles French Revolution" in cloth.
When she desires to tighten the treat
ment she finds a volume of Kipling's bal
lads exceedingly handy but when it is
necessary to make a heavier application
she finds nothing quite so effective as
Mr. Clevelands complete works in buck
ram. There is no case of faded appetite
that won't respond to that treatment
judiciously applied
1t is scarcely possible to overestimate
the Importance of Mrs. Litz's discovery
1t is true that she was finally arrested
for cruelty on her husbands complaint
but he dare not deny that she restobed
his appetite, and that is what he wanted
The beauty of the treatment is that it is
both hygienic and literary and that il
brings the patient into close touch with
| the best works of the best authors, That
fact alone should make it tremendously
| popular in chicago where the true func-
| ton of literature has until now remained
| unknown