Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-09-21
J6ll||||||I;ilIl|lss'

les lie bulds Whch was yS.A6
was eagerly sought after" What re-
ward was offered?" asked the sweet
girl.-Tit- Bits. !. AZ.
Father--Who Is the best writer In
your class? Bobby-Jack Bulger; he
writes the excuses for everyNfeller In
the .eiass.-Judge.
Employer-Was there many people at
your grandmother's funeral yesterday?
Clerk-Yes. indeed; every seat In The
grand stand was occupied.
Uncle inquired of little Bobby II he
had been good little boy. Bobby
No, haven't. Uncle-Why,s hope you
haven't been very bad. Bobby--Oh,
no; just comfortable.
Hawkins-I don't see from all ac-
counts that these naval chap.ains do
much. Tucker-Oh. don't know:
see a good deal about converted yachts.
Richmond Dispatch.
Coacher loudly)--Two are out! Play
for the batter! Mrs. .Notupp-- Batter.
batter! Goodness sakes. what sort
of batter are these men playing for?
Mr.. Mann-Dough, madam.
The parson--I heah de angels done
fetched yo' anudder baby brudder?
Little pickaninny-Yaas, but II jest
seems lax dem angels picks us out de
blacklist babies up dere!-Life.
Frank (unmarried)-Do you think
man has right to open his wife's let
tiers? Robert (married)-W he might
have the right. but don't see how he
could have the courage.-Boston Trav-
eller.
Tramp-Yep, lady, I'm known from
Maine, to Californy as Printed Call
co." Lady--What funny name! Why
do they call you that? Tramp-'Cause
II yer went to wash me I'd run.-Chica-
go News.
In the parlor: Edith Showing her
smart little brother to the new beau
Now, Torsmy, you have counted up TO
eleven, tell us what comes after eleven.
Tommy-Pop, in his stocking feet
Brooklyn Life.
City miss lin rural book store)-
Have you "Wooed and Wonw Clerk
(blushing)-Not yet, ma'am; but I'm
keeping steady company with Sally
Haceede. an my prospects are good
New York World. 80 ~ q s-o'
"You are quite run down." said the
facetious cyclist to the man he bad
knocked over; you ought to take some
thing" II WILL" said his victim. jump
ing up; 'I'n take your name and ead-
dress."-Pick- Me-Up. - sF5fsiss-F
Freddie, do you know what the b.
BILE says about lie ?" asked his moth
err with feigned severity. 'Yeth.
ma'am," lisped Freddie; "a + lie IS ian
abomination unto the Lord and very
refuge in time of trouble. "EKansas
City Star. ysx
"Will some one in the class,v asked
the teacher Of rhetoric. i"giyeIa better
form to the sentence, John can ride the
mule If he wants tor '''John chncride
the mule II the mule wants, him toIJ'
said the boy with the bad eye.-Ghfca-
go Tribune. Is, AfH 2'tae
"Yaas, Miss Cutting" remarked Chol-
ly; II believe in-aw-straightfor
speech. It's my custom, doncher know,
to always speak my mind" That's 1t,
is IT." put in the young lady; II often
wondered why you had so little to say"
Philadelphia Record.
"And, by the way" asked the Old
schoolmate, "what has become of Nose
ly, who used to talk so much about de-
voting his life to uplifting mankind?
Did he go into the ministry NO"
answered the other schoolmate, "he Is
In the elevator business"
Hell am surprised at DR.. White.
After being our family doctor for years
and treating me for all sorts of things,
and to think of all the money we've
paid him, too! She-What has he done?
He-He wouldn't pass me for the life
insurance company.-Tit-Bi
One day Tommy accompanied his
mother on shopping expedition, and,
seeing large candy man in a confec-
TONER'S window, he paused in fro..- Of
it with wistful look; then, turning
away regretfully, said: Mamma,
could lick that fellow with both hands
tied behind Troy Times.
Intrlcacies of language: What does
that young man propose to do?" in
quired Mrs. Cumrox. Il think, man.
ma" answered her daughter. in a tone
of slight annoyance, that he purposes
to propose" "Oh, you think that, do
you? Well, what desire to know
about his purpose Is this: When does
he purpose to quit purposing and pro-
oseT'-Washington Star.
Sunday school teacher-Who was the
wisest man. Johnny? Johnny-Solo-
mon. Sunday school teacher-That's
right. Now, Willie, who was the strong
est man? Willie = Jonah. Sunday
school teacher-Wrong; but what rea-
son have you for believing Jonah was
the strongest man? Willie-'Cause the
whale couldn't hold him after he had
got him down.-Denver Times.
Yes, her hat was certainly lovely,
though 1t had cost but eighteen dollars
and thirteen cents; quite as lovely as
that Smith woman's, which had cost
nearly a hundred. but the Smiths
are able to own a more conspicuous
pew in church than we are" faltered
her husband. well, they can't come
in any later than we can," she ex-
claimed, acknowledgement Journal.
70 .