davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
aHoorlNo our Lac LIaATs.
Ar Occasion when the Old Ranch
man saw the Trick Done.

man saw the Trick Done.
According to western stories" said
a former rznchman. .'one OF the favor
Ite amusements OF frontier despeFi-
does Is shooting out the lights new
er saw Il done but once. but the Incl.
dent made sufficient impression on my
mind 10 last me for life II was al
Benton. a small camp on the old Stake
Plain trail. In northeastern New Mexi-
co. | was staying there over night
with a couple OF cattlemen. and we
naturally gravitated to the only resort
in town. a sort of combination OF iiaE
and gambling house. In rough Que
story building. containing good sized
single room
.'The bar was on one side. and on
the other were two or three Mexican
monte tables. over each OF which were
several large coal oil lamps In wall
brackets In the center OF the place
was a chandelier containing three
more. altogether giving a good deal OF
light. We were sitting at one side
smoking and talking. when in rushed
half dozen drunken cowboys. headed
BY a well known ranchnau named
Bill Wells.
The crowd were out for excitement
and didn't care how they got IL They
took several drinks and then clustered
around one OF the monte tables. In a
few moments Wells insisted upon max
ing a bet over the limit. TO which the
dealer objected. If you don't turn for
that bet I'll shoot out your blankefy
blank lights" bawled the ranchman.
The lermit ez feety dollar said the
Mexican dealer. and the words were no
sooner out of his mouth than Wells
and his gang pulled their six shooters
and began blazing away at the lamps.
About % or so shots were fired. and
almost at the outset the place was In
complete darkness. or coarse there
was a stampede. but | remember being
surprised that ! had heard no crash
OF glass. Half an hour later ] went
back and found the place lit up as
brightly as ever Wells and his cow
boys having been taken away by
friends. The roof was full Of holes.
but not q single lamp had been hit.
What had put them out was the con-
cussiOn of the shots In a confined
space" = New Orleans Times Demo
crat
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
Too Hard For Him,

A Frenchman 1T certain hotel the
other evening. who was boasting that
he had thoroughly mastered the Eng
lish language. was asked to write the
following dictatiOn:
"As Hugh Hughes was hewing Il
Yule log from 4 yew tree. man. dress
ed in clothes Of dark hue. came up 10
Hugh and said. Have you seen my
ewes? If you will wait until I hew
this l will go anywhere In Europe with
gou TO look for your ewes"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
w,x . Cemetery Fences

II was a Maine graveyard. and the
fence thereof was in a most disreputa-
BILE condition.
Some OF the neighbors were trying TO
start n movement to put a new fence
around the cemetery. and 1t was meet
ing with general approval till the caus-
tic wit of Darius Howard was aroused
aWhat for!" be inquired what's
the need OF fencing the graveyard
There amt no one inside that wants to
come out. and I'm darn sure there ain
any one outside that wants to get H.
So what's the need OF the feneeE
And the fence was not built till FOLK
had cessed TO ehuckle over the thrust
OF DarIus.-Lewiston Journal
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
His opinIon Of sbal,e,n.,-e

There is n story going about concern
ing a famous man OF letters who Wis
ited Washington recently. He appear
ed at but one dinner party. There
he sat next the young daughter OF a
noted naval officer. Her vocabulary
is Of 4 kind peculiar to very young
girls. but she ratified away at the IA
nous man without a moments respite.
1t was during pause in the general
conversation that she said TO him:
I'm awfully stuck on Shakespeare.
Don't you think he's terribly interest
ingT'
Everybody listened to hear the great
mans brilliant reply. for as n Shakes
pearean scholar he has few peers.
Yes" he said solemnly. Il do think
he is interesting. ! think he is more
than that think Shakespeare is just
simply too cute for anything. Wash
ington Post.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

DIR. Emily Blackwell. one OF the pio-
neers Of her sex In medicine. heard a
young physician deliver fierce qua
tribe against opening the doors OF the
profession TO women. When he ceas-
ed, she asked:
"Win yon please sssss. me one reason
why they shouls not practice medi-
cine?'
certainly. madam. They haven't the
muscle. the Drawn. the physical
strength
II see. sir. Your conception OF a
siekroom Is 4 slaughter house. Mine
"a not San Francisco ArgOnaut
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
Parnguay.. PnrtIculnr rlea..

Perhaps the plague in Paraguay is
merely an attack Of pigue. or sand flea.
This insect is called nigua In the native
language In 1870 1t killed a whole
colony OF Englishmen. consisting Of
200 families. turning the colony. which
was at'Itape. into a cemetery. A Ger
man colony at Aeegua was driven out.
The pigue causes bubOes and attacks
the warmest parts Of the bOdy-that k.
the cavities and the groin and armpit-
just the same spots as the eastern
plague. 1t attacks EnglIshmen and
Germans preferentially and avoids
those that use but little soap. Soaps
clean the body. and the pigue likes
clean persons TO eat. Ii also avoids
people who eat more or less poisonous
food. \ man saturated with alcohOls,
Boca gin. nicotine and PaSeo de julio
cookery is pretty well safe from the
sand tiea.-BuenOs Ayres Herald.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
TWO MEAN TOWNS.
The Stories That the Travelling Men
Told About Them.

The Stories That the Travelling Men
Told About Them.
They were talking about bad towns.
''The meanest place ever was In
said the man who travels for Chicago
house. ''ls down In Massachusetts. Say.
do you know what happened while
was stopping there once? A man had
fallen Though hole In a sidewalk and
sustained injuries that resulted in the
loss OF his right arm. He sued the city
for damages. and the case was tried
before 4 jury. which. the papers said.
was composed of representative citi-
zens. Well. what do you suppose they
did to him? Brought in a verdict in
favor of the city. holding that inas-
much as he was left handed his injury
didn't amount to anything"
"Yes." the cigar man said. that's a
pretty mean town, admit. but know
of a worse one. This place Is in Penn
sylvania. An acquaintance Of mine
down there was injured some time ago
in pretty much the same way the man
you mentioned got hurt. He fell on a
bad sidewalk and lost one of his legs.
He sued the city. and didn't get any
thing. | never heard just why. but
probably because the jurors didn't be-
lieve he needed more than one leg in
his business. seeing that he was bar
Der and couldn't hone razor or shave
a mnn with his foot anyway. Bat
wait. | haven't come TO the point at
which the real meanness developed.
Being a poor man, he couldn't afford to
buy a cork leg. so he had to getsaiong
with wooden peg. and one day while
he was crossing the principal street
this peg in some way got wedged be-
tween n couple Of paving stones right
in the middle Of the street car track.
1t took them nearly an hour TO get him
loose. and what do you suppose hap
pened then: Blamed II they didn't go
and fine him $40 and costs for obstruct-
ing trafficr-ChIeago Times-H Herald.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

DIR. Crosse. in an article In The Ian
Get on blackwater fever. incidentally
calls attention 10 the fact that IL is not
wise for those who have an idiOsyncra-
sy against quinine or who suffer from
even slight albuminuria to go TO mala-
rious climates. He believes that In the
more malarious districts at least five
grains of quinine should be taken a
day to prevent chronic malarial poison
ing. This he considers necessary In ad-
dition TO ordinary precautions in re-
gard TO exposure to chills. wet and the
sun and as to moderation in eating and
drinking.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
GoSernor- Island.

There Is large expanse OF rolling
sward on Governors island kept at all
times In the pink Of condition. This
little island or Battery park is con
ceded to be the best kept army post on
the Atlantic coast. There are two
reasons for this. Fort Columbus Is the
headquarters Of the department of the
east. II must assume an appearance
In keeping with It's high standing in
the department.
II also has military prison. and the
eOnvicts sent there for terms Of months
or years are sentenced to hard labor.
Under the supervision Of sentiuels
these men keep the walks and prone
nades scrupulously clean and the
sward closely clipped and free from
falling leaves and other litter. They
also give proper attention to the varI-
Gus buildings and their Immediate STR
roundings.-NewY York Press.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
A HnnnY Thonrhf-

The spontaneous and happy wit OF
the late Isaac H. Bromley. for many
years writer Of New York Tribune
leaders. is recalled by the example be-
low:
One day in The Tribune Office the
veteran journalist Charles T. Congdon
was talking Of the delightful reading
be had found In Bayle's Dictionary
and remarked that II be were ever IN
jail he would be quite eontented with
that book
''of course you would said BroIn.
ley. IF you had Bayle. you could get
ont
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
Getting ont of n Corner.

What a beautiful lounge"
''Yes. That's birthday present from
my husband. He always gives me a
present thar costs him as many dollars
as | am years old"
THAT'S nice OF him. 1t reconcIles
enc to growing old. By the way, |
have lounge at home Ike that. bu;
not nearly as fine. and we paid S3S
Tor IL
is that all? This-this didn't cost
nearly as much as Chicago
Irfbune.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
just In Time.

Hello! Is that Mr.. HIghmus' resi-
denceY'
Yes"
''ls that you. Fannyr
"Yes."
Are you aloneY
"Yes."
$50 am I. Everybody else at the Of
fee has gone. want to talk TO you i
little. Oar
"'Sh. Don't you know the girl at
the central Office is listeningT
Darkness. was going to say. may
come on before get around this even
ing It's n nice day. isn't it? Well
goodby. Tribune.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
steadfast Nature.

Il have seen Brother Bruggetts grow
from a poor young man to a middle
aged millionaire" said the aged minis
ter. "and II has not changed him one
bit. When he first entered my church.
he established the habit of putting a
quarter In the plate every Sunday. and
though he has since grown rich. he
outs in his % cents. indianapolis
Journal.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

"What's that there young mans
buslness:" asked Mr.. Parvenu.
Hes a tutor. believe" replied his
wife.
what does he teachg"
zone OF them old sciences. / s'pose.'
answered Mrs. Parvenu. II amt just
sure what it is. but last night Maybelle
told me he was giving her some lessons
In osculafion-"
well. | s'pose she's got to be edn-
Gated" returned the old man. Il only
hope he won't charge no fancy price
for his lessons. Post.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
The Popular southern Girl.

Two men of southern manner OF
speech were talking of a mutual friend
named Henry.
did Henry eveh get mated TO that
young lady In MemphisT asked one.
The other shook his head and re-
piled: NO. sch. When Henry got
down theah. lie found he had to take
his numbeh and stand in line so as to
be able 60 see the young lady. so he
-caE,e away."-Chicago Record.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
Applause and Criticism

II was after the piano recital. and the
audience was still applauding. There
were two English women. though. who
did not clap their hands. But they
commented In tones that were audible
for some distance around thus:
''rhe poor man. Win they make
him play again.
Isn't II awful the way the Ameri-
cans applaud? It's so vGlgarr'
''Yes; it's the most vulgar thing they
do"
And the Americans took meekly their
lesson IN manners.-New York Com
mercial Advertiser.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

The famous fogs OF Newfoundland
nre only found as a rule on the Ca,
and south coasts and on the banks .
being caused by the meeting Of the
Erctie current with the gulf stream
The interior IN summer is described
as most delightful climate. resera.
bling that OF the south OF France.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
The PursuI, of P.easrr.

We smile at the ignorance of the
savage who cuts down the tree in or
der to reach its fruits. But the fact
Is that thunder Of this description
is made by every person who is over
Eager AID impatient in the pursuit OF
pleasure
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

Quick Is the succession Of human
events. The cares Of today are seldom
the cares OF tomorrow. and when we
lie down at night we may say 10 most
of our troubles. "Ye have done your
worst. and we shall meet no more"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
The Change Of a Comma.

whenever she asks me to do any
thing" solilOquized Mr.. Meeker pen
sively. Il always go and do IL. Ike a
fool"
Yes" said Mrs. Meeker. who hap
pened along in time TO overhear him.
Whenever ] ask you 10 do anything
you always go and do II like a fool
Chicago Tribune.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

The Persians in 516 r. C. invented
a transparent glass varnish. which
they laid over sculptured rocks 10 pre-
serve them from bad weather This
coating has lasted TO our day. while
the rocks beneath are honeyeombed.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
Virtue.

The elements OF virtue are ut the
bottom Of every heart. and. though
they may be trampled underfoot and
crushed into the mud. they still exist.
and. when rescued and restored. nobIl-
ity and manhood Will grow out OF
them
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
wor.r on rhrn r,e rhour.,.

ShadbOlt-Weh l'm $50 worse of
than ! WIS yesterday morning.
Dingus-lIOw's that?
Shadbolt-i was held up by footpads
on my way home last night and rob
bed.
Dingus-rm sorry for you. old man
But they didn't get the 81 borrowed
Of you before you started home. any.
how
Slladboli-That's So forgot that
I'm So worse OG than ! was yesterday
morninS.-Chicago Tribune.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

The hours OF work in the Calcutta
jEte mills are from 4:30 a. m. 10 p. m.
or 1G= hours per day. Saturdays in
cluded. aud all repairs and CLEANING OF
machinery have TO be done oil Sun
days.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

The puppy. as such. thinks every one
Is his friend. As he grows up he curbs
his enthusiasm. When an old dog with
gray jowIs. he oniv giares at people
who call to him. Human beings have
many canine traits. including four
teeth of the sort used by mans best
friend.-New York World.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
Why He Wa. vuL.,u,

Didn't sleep wink last night" said
the dyspeptic.
''Overwork
no: j heard one OF those songs about
slumber sweetly. sweet dreams be
thine. and the eonfounded me Kept
running through my head all ,lcht"-
Washington Star.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

No trait Of character is more valus hln
to a woman than the possession OF a
sweet temper. Home can never be
happy without II. II is Ike the flowers
that spring up In our pathway. reviv-
Ing and cheering us.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

This Gates Ajar' design is a hand
some one. said the tombstone man.
"it is just wbat | want. said The
widow -Iie never shut n door in all
our married life without being told
Indianapolis Journal.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

In the Spanish Bibles and prayer
books the name OF the Saviour and those
Of the saints are always printed with
the title "senor" (misterl before them.
as Mr.. John the Baptist. Mr.. Saint
Paul. Mr.. Saint Matthew. etc.-ChlcagO
Record
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
To Catch Him.

Fuddy-I want 10 get acquainted
with Moskins. but ! hardly know how
to go about ii. he's such queer fish.
Duddy-A queer fish. eh? Why don't
you drop him a line?-B Boston Tran
scriDt
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

In hattie rcd uniforms alirari the
eye most readily. ana u men wearing
That color are killed To in rife green.
or q IN hlEe or 3 IN either brown. blue
gray or gay.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
A Wen neaten PAN

Teacher-Can any OF the class ex-
plain to me why the way Of the trans
Eressor Is hard?
Scholar guess it's because it's
travelled so much.-Ohio State Jour
nal.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

When you ansUad your pOcketbOok In
a good cause you also remove a load
from your conscience Ycu feel bet
ter. and so does every one concerned
Denver News.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
confutine an Tmpo..ibIlitr.

81 want TO see Mrs. Smythe." said
the visitor.
"You can't" said the servant. "She
has the toothache"
You must be mistaken" the man
replied. I'm her dentist. and | lave
her teeth here in this package."-Cath-
ole Standard and Times.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

Pleasure is very seldom found where
II Is sought Our brightest blazrs OF
giadness aTe commonly kindled by TN
expected sParks.-Johnson-
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

How much is this soap a cakey"
Take two for Is cents"
two? DO you think / buy soap by
the wholesale Fliegende Blatter.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

The word Asia Is derived from the
sanskrit Ushas. meaning the land Of
the morning dawn.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
Newfoundland Fogs.

The curiosity Of others enables some
men to make good Chicago
Nau-c
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

Ihquiring Boy Ma. what did the
noths eat before Adam and Eve wore
clothes?
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13

Money has been and always can u
t-ade more easily out CT simple pas
.n;ed inventions than OF. CT any Ia.
vestment or occupation.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-12-13
PENNsYLvANIA RAILROAD.
sa.rrnn srarpasp r,nr
IN EFFECT NOV. 10, 1893.

CONDENSED sCHEDULE.
Trains arrive ana depart from the station at
Johnstown as follows:
The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1899-02-16


Farmer H. n. Clement, of Lowell.
Lake County. Indiana, was cunning
In the Kankakee Marsh. He came
upon flock of wild geese and bagged
several OF them, one of which aston
ished him by having as breastpin an
arrow nine inches long. That goose
became the wonder of the neighbour
hood and the study of scientists, the
only conclusion reached being that,
wherever the wild bird came from,
there it got the arrow, so unique in
formation that it could be assigned to
no tribe of Indians in the United
States or any other known country.
Finally Professor o. T. Mason, of the
Natural Museum, said the bird and
arrow could have come from no other
place on the globe than the Yukon
Valley, for except in that region no
such arrows are made.
Science does not pretend TO saw how
long the goose had carried the arrow
OF Yukon tribesman until IL met it's
death from the shot of civilized gunner
down on an Indiana marsh. The bird
dssdained the weapon of a savage. but
tnrned up its legs to the marksman-
snip OF the Hoosier farmer years
afterward. and thousands OF miles
away from its summer home in Arctic
oesolation, as twas iourneying south
"ard'-Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1899-02-16
Cool Under an Enemy's Fire.,

A very young officer, who had goiIe
almost straight from school to the
army and thence to India, was lehdL
ing his company through q rocky
pass, on returning from a scouting
expedition. They were beset by the
enemy, who fred at them from be-
hind the rocks, aud the men were
growing very unsteady. Those in the
rear began to be impatient, and
shouted to the men in front, "Hurry1
up! What are you waiting for there?'
The young officer answered quite
coolIy: "Hold on a minute! I'm
lighting my pipe"
And he struck match and lit it,
There was roar of laughter, and a
soldier called out, "Well, since you're
so pressin', think I'll have pipd
myself" And he, too, struck match
and began to smoke. This bit of fun
steadied the men, and they came
through in good order. Rudyard
Kipling, in Westminster Gazette.
The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1899-02-16
Heroic Life Savers,

In the series of Heroes OF Peace"
there is an article in the Century on
Heroes Of the Life Saving Service"
by Gustav Kobbe. Mr.. Kobbe saws,
District Superintendent Jerome G.
Kiah, with headquarters al SAND
Beach, Michigan, ia one of The heroe,
OF the Lie Saving Service. He holds
the gold medal, the highest award the
United States Government can bestow
for heroism in saving life. His name
Is associated with what was both one
OF the most daring attempts at rescue
aud one of tie greatest tragedies of
the service-a tragedy which wiped
out an entire crew with the exception
OF this sole survivor.
Mr.. Kiah was at the time keeper of
the Point aux Barques Life Saving
Station on Lake Huron. "A vessel
struck too far out to be reached with
the shot and line, The peril Of ct.
The Pioche weekly record. [volume] (Pioche, Nev.) 1877-1900, 1899-02-16
Pitch ers in Plants.

Professor S. H. Vines gives a useful
resume of the present state of our
knowledge OF the structure and func,
ton of pitchers in plants. In the
great majority Of cases these struc,
lures are traps for insects; while eth
ers have apparently no such function.
Among insect traps, the greater num-
Der appear to be incapable of digest
ing the insects which they capture.
absorbing only the products of de-
composition caused by micro organ
isms; these thereto are not correctly
termed carnivorous plants. The
pitcher of the various species of Ne.
pennies, and possibly also that Of
,Cephalotus undoubtedly secretes O
digestive engine. When pitchers are
not insect traps, they have some fupo-
ton in connection with the supply Of
water to the plant; either relieving Il
of an excess of water which it MAJ,
have absorbed, or storing it up for
future use,