The times., 1899-04-03
A NEW LEASE OF LIFE.
The Free Discussion society Talks
About Socialism and Trusts.


The Free Discussion Society took
new lease of life yesterday afternoon and
opened for business at p. IN. in the ante
room at Sheldons Academy. in + Street.
The stairway leading to the new Senate OF
Brotherly Love was choicely billed with
literature, which Informed those who chose
to read that Free speech and but one
at a time was the attraction, while the
proprietor OF the hall ruinsi the good ef-
feet with an enormous sign which stated
that tobacco must not be used on the
premises, either in punches or "one at a
time"
Founder James Seldom Cowdon was on
hand bright and early and with his hope
full colleague, Mr.. Augustine, waited for
the suffering masses to come and receive
economic salvation. The expected masses
came in ''one at a time and while there
were but ten of them the attendance was
n great improvement on the previous meet
ing. The old gentleman with the mag
nificent head failed to appear but Founder
Cowdon was highly elated over the large
audience of ten.
The mass meeting was called to order
by Founder Cowdon, who stated that the
subject selected for discussion was So
cialism. Mr.. Cowdon then read column
attack on trusts and monopolies and
other inhuman things, and wound up with
new and original Cowdon scheme for
Cowdon public currency.-sA sample sheet
of the new currency was presented to each
member Of the audience.
The bills contained a blank which read:
Here insert the proper denomination.
The audience seemed TO doubt the value
of the new currency, as no one attempted
10 fill in any amount.
Mr. Cowdon stated that the new cur
rency was a panacea for all economic Ills
and would give every man, woman, and
child four hours labor per day at 81 per
hour. -
Mr. Augustine was then intsoduced and
after some preliminary Eskirmishing
launched forth into a long, bold. even a
naughty attack on present things and a
glowing description of what socialism
would do to Hanna, Mckinley, and the
trusts.
"The coming crisis" said MIR. Augustine
"the coming crisis is-the coming crisis Is
is coming. Yes, it is coming. Let me tell
you l have spoken socialism with
New York and what! | have been at
man in the Tenderloin in New
York and the crowd abuse my friend.
They throw eggs and stones and jump up
and say: Don't throw at this man, because
he has a red head. Gentlemen OF the
Tenderloin, throw at me, but don't insult
the American flag. mean ] grasped nag
and said this.
And what it is, my friends? 1t is
Mark Hanna and the trusts who run it, the
country 1t is all Mark Hanna who runs
Mckinley and the country. But we will
form new party, the National Union
party. and our candidate will win. don't
know who will be the candidate, but
Say Cowdon" suggested the gentleman
bearing that name
NO. no; not Cowdon,'' resumed Mr..
Augustine. Brother Cowdon will be re-
warded in the next world. The candidate
will be the black horse, the black horse.
We will put him in that house lpointing to
the Pension Officel; nc, in that house
lpointing to the Monumentl."
You mean that house. said Mr.. Cow
don. pointing to the White House
Yes. that house and Hanna and Mckin-
lev and the trusts will die a pol teal
death And think Of that island-that---
What island is it where they were, Mr..
Cowdon?'
'.Jekyl Island" answered Founder Cow
don.
Yes; think of the island, the ] kyl
| island. where they were. There they nom
! mate this man and renominate this man.
ON, what. l tell you. that island will be
St Helena for Napoleon Mckinley, and
! there he will die a political death, with
( Hanna and the trusts. And the people will
| nut IN a mark on that island to show that
! on IL died Mckinley and Hanna and the
| trusts
When Mr. Augustine had ceased three OF
The valued ten in the audience arose and
started out.
Stay" said MIR Cowdon.
NO, sir, ," answered one of the departing
! trio. II am Socialist and you are not
doing what you said. You said free dis
cussion and one at time, and when we
come here one does all the talking and We
| get no chance" Thereupon the trio de-
parted in disgust
The remaining SIX fought The battle out.
! Mr. Cowdon was elected secretary and a
gentleman from California" was made
chairman for the day. Brother Cohen
wanted free speech and no laws. Mr. Cow
don wanted some rules and an order Of
business. and everybody spoke at once and
fought the battle point by point.
In the mean time the proprietor of the
hall prowled uneasily about the room and
poered from hooks and doorways. Tell
the gentleman to have a seat" said the
chairman.
"oh he is the proprietor, said Mr.. Cow
don.
well. he seems to be waiting, said the
chairman.
u suppose he is afraid he won't get his
rent" answered Mr.. Cowdon.
Il am not afraid denied the proprietor.
III ] were ] would come forward and de-
mand my money.
Let US take up collection" suggested
Mr.. Cowdon. The collection was taken and
the rent paid. There are now IA cents in
the treasury" said Mr.. Cowdon.
Mr.. Augustine suggested that the topic
| for-discusson should be Our Duty to the
Filipinos as a Nation Thereupon one of
the six objected and amended the topic to
read: "our Duty to the Philippines as a
Nation" The topic was voted down, and
II was announced that the gentleman from
n,Nt meeting.
The Free Discussion Society" then ad
ioprDed at 5:5s D. N.