The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1899-11-03

...................
And TO think that this document
should be Endorsed with
1.-The plaintiffs claim is for damages for
breach of promise of marriage"
''Impudence!" shrieked the writted
one. There can be no evidence"
There he was doomed to be mistaken.
The trial came on, and the court was
packed with those good natured friends
who find the keenest delight in the
miseries of Jonathan and Pythias.
The evidence given by the plaintiff
and three young typewriters was of
the most startling character.
Three bonny, bright eyed city sylphs
had each the self-same tale to coo forth.
If we quote Jane Robinson we quote
the other two.
Jane Robinson (called)-Our tele
phone is in direct connection with
Shocks & Bellby's, where Miss John
son is employed. I also know Mr.. Ster-
rimer's voice as coming through the
telephone quite well. On the 30th of
August, at the request of Miss John
son, I stood by our telephone at $3.50
p. m. precisely. 1 can recognize the de-
PENDANTS voice through our telephone
quite distinctly. I heard him say:
Dear Rose, 1 love you for your beauty
and virtue. Be my wife, darling; L
should glory in your love, and glory to
make it known to all the world
Further examined, the witness con-
= in
We have also Ibersen's new phone in
our office, and the words were trans
mitted into it direct from the telephone.
No, there could be no mistake what
ever as to its being Mr.. Sterrimer's
voice Yes, Miss johnson did tell me
what she has already stated in her evil
dence, that she concealed the end of
her receiver in a bouquet of roses, and
that Mr.. Sterrimer had spoken into it
that she had meant him to do so, as
he was always making proposals of
marriage when no witnesses were by"
When the last of the three typewrit-
ing witnesses had finished Phineas Buzz
fuz, Q. c., opened large wooden case.
This said that learned counsel for
phonos, with all the latest improve
ments of the great American inventor,
Ibersen. With your lordship's permits
sion, and to make use of a somewhat
vulgar phrase, I shall now proceed TO
turn on the tap
The court listened in breathless ex-
pectation. Out came the undoubted
tones of Mr.. Sterrimer, uttered in mys-
terious falsettoforte whispers:
Dear Rose, / love you for your beau
ty-"
The rest was almost drowned in
laughter, in which the learned judge
himself took part.
The laughter had only for few sec
onds subsidized when Mr.. Buzfuz treat
ed the court to yet another surprise.
A large frame, six feet by two, draped
in linen, was held up in front of the
jury by the plaintiffs solicitors ''out-
door common law" The covering was
raised. Horror for the defendant!
Yes, naught else but a most splendid
Cherony's photo enlargement of the
defendant clasping the plaintiff to his
bosom.
"My lord" said the learned counsel,
''this is the age of science. By the aid
of kodak concealed in cigar case ON
the mantel shelf, provided with
heightened tube, of which the pneu-
matte ball was placed on the floor be-
meath sheet of newspaper and touched
by the fairy foot of my fascinating
client, the condition of the defendants
feelings and treatment of the lady are
here clearly depicted. Allow me to
state that it was only out of regard for
the shrinking modesty of this ill-treat-
ed young lady that this evidence was
not produced by mutoscope.''
When order had been restored the ex-
cellent Buzfuz, @. c., was to be seen in
affable consultation with the opposing
counsel.
"Your lordship," said he, "may we
request an adjournment with view to
possibly amicable settlement"
ut would certainly be in the interest
of both parties" said his lordship smil
ing sweetly.
That little settlement cost Mr.. Ster
rimer the small sum of G 500 sterling
exclusive of costs. Still, fate showed
some little kindness to him. He hap
pened to hold 6 5000 worth of shares in
the 1bersen's Photograph, Limited.
The advertisement caused by the dis
play in open court was so good that the
shares went up like Mr.. Brooks Thurs
day night rockets. So he lost nothing
in particular after ALL
AS to Miss Rose johnson? She in
vested her $500 in running private
money lending show for the benefit, or
the contrary, of smart typewriters.-
Chicago Times-Herald.