davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
ORDINANCE NO. "a.

AN ORDINANCE. Granting permission to
the Spring Telephone Company 10 erect and
maintain It's Telephone Line N the Borough of
hiddleburg, Snyder County, Pennsylvania.
Section 4. Belt ordained by The Town Coun-
ell OF III" Borough OF Middlehurg. In Town Cuun.
ell assembled and IL is hereby enacted and CY.
dained by authority OF the same, That y .Iut tSS on
he and the same is hereby granted l." The Spring
Telephone Company 10 erect poles ana run wires
on the same over or under any CT the Alleys or
Lanes OF this Borough, for the purpose OF trans
acting general Telephone business, aud the
same from time to time alter, renew and repair
SrctiOn2. Poles car not he placed urOn any
OF the STREETS OF the said Borough. except where
there are no Alleys TO approach the Town, or
when impossible TO cross the Town by Alley or
Lane.
Section 3. Said poles shall he straight and
barked. and shall be painted al east fifteen tcet
from the ground up wiz not less than two coats
OF paint, such AS the Street Committee OF said
Borough may direct. The location ofths line and
poles Shall be under the supervision Of the said
Street Committee and should II become neceS-
sary at any time In the judgment OF said Com
mittee to change the location OF any OF the poles,
the said Spring Telephone Company shall Inme-
diately upon notice from said Committee make
| the desired change or changes al the cost and
| expense OF thelsald Spring Telephone Company.
| Section 4. The said Telephone Company,
before entering upon any OF the streets. Alleys
| or Lanes OF said Borough, for the purpose OF
constructing or erecting poles TO said Telephone
| Line, shall enter into bond In the sum OF one
Thousand (sl .COo) Dollars TO the said Borough
| TO be approved by the Town Council, condition
ed for the payment or all damages occaSioned by
the construction OF said Telephone Line, and
also conditioned that the streets, alleys and
| lanes be lert in as good condition as they were
before entering upon the same for the purpose
| OF constructing said Telephone Line,
Section 5. Members OF Council shall have
the free use OF said Telephone Line. for sending
and receiving messages over the same for all
municipal purposes, as long rs said line shall be
maintained.
Section q. The provisions OF this ordinance
shall be formally accepted by said Company. and
In default OF such acceptance the same shall be
null and void.
Section. II the said Telephone Line is not
In full operation within one year from date OF
the passage OF this ordinance, the same shall be
nulland void.
Passed at a Special meeting OF the Town Coun
ell March 18th, 1899.
IC. STETLER, ID. I. RHOADS,
Secretary. President.
March 18th. 1899, the above ordlndnce having
been passed by Town Council and the same hav
ING been duly presented 10 me for my approval
or dsapproval, hereby approve the same.
J. +. RElTZ,
Chief Burgess
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
THE BANANA PLANTER.
J.. Honauras lie 10 q Creature Whose
PhilosOphic Calm Il Never
Disturbed.

THE small banana planter OF Hon.
duras is the happiest creature on
earth" said local shipper. reports the
New Orleans Times democrat. and
nothing ever removes him from his
phllosophic calm. The frightful hur-
ricaSe which ragged along the Iiondu-
rian coast on the LIST of the month ab-
solutely destroyed scores of plnnta-
tions The trees were plucked out OF
the earth like blades Of grass. the
fragile buildings were blown into kind
ling wood. and nothing whatever left
TO tell the tale. Happening anywhere
else, such disaster would have been
q tragedy of the first order, and meant
incalculnble suffering, but nature Is
very kind to her children on the banana
coast. All that Is necessary TO rehE bill
tate the ravaged plantations Is to stick
n few clippings in the ground and wait
for them to take root ana bear The
work Is usually divided between the
panter and his wife-she sets out the
clippings and he does the waiting
some tillit Uuliilp tiiS SoA' - ~ 80 NV
too tired. he may rebuild his residence.
This is done by tying native rope
around four suitable trees and laying
cane stalks crossways over the top.
Other cane stalks nre now and then
used for sides, but they are really un-
necessary, as the Honduranian concep-
ton OF privacy is very vague, and there
is never anything to steal. So, as
matter of fact, the hurricane was much
less calamitous than 1t appeared 10
those who are unfamiliar with native
conditions. The principal loss which IT
entailed was in damage to the present
banana crop, and the fruit grows with
such rapidity that three months ought
to completely repair it. Meantime, the
planter does quantities OF resting and
Is happy"
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
steamed CLANS Served in Shells.

Wash the clans thoroughly; arrange
neatly in o steamer, which stand over n
kettle of boiling water, and boil rapidly
for 20 or 80 minutes. Lift the clans,
saving the liquor that has filed the
shells, and strain into small cups, add
n bit Of butter and busting Of pepper.
When about to serve to your guests
stand each Of the cups in the center of
a large soup dish and arrange the clans
around. With an oyster fork the CLAIMS
may then be removed from the shells.
dipped into the liquor and eaten. Serve
very hot.-Ladies' Home Journal.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
BARRELS OF SAMPLES.
Over Two Hundred Thousand Trial Bot.
ties Sent Free by Mail.

By special arrangement with the
manufacturers of that justly famous
Kidney Medicine. DR.. David Kenne
dy's Favorte Remedy, the readers Of
the Posi- are enabled to obtain Il trial
bottle and pamphlet OF valuable med
ical advice absolutely free, by send.
ing their full name and address to
the DIR. DAVID X ENNEDI CORPO.
RATION, Rondout, n. Y, aud men
ton this paper.
OF course this involves enormous
expense to the manufactured but they
have received so many grateful let
ters from those who have been bene.
fitted and cured of the various dis
eases of the Kidney, Liver Bladder
and Blood, Rheumatism. Dyspepsia
aud Chronic Constipation, aud all
weaknesses peculiar to women, that
they willingly send trial bottles to all
sufferers.
Upon investigation it was found
that 81 per cent. of those who had
used the trial bottle had received
such benefit from il that they pur'
chased large sized bottles of their
druggists.
how many physicians have failed to
help you. send for trial bottle of
this great medicine, it costs yen but
postal card, and benefit and cure
will most certainly be the result.
Put some urine in q glass tumbler
and let 1t stand "a hours; il it has a
sediment or if it is pale or discolored,
milky or cloudy, stringy or ropy,your
Kidneys or Bladder are in bad con
dition. DR.. David Kennedy's Favor
ite Remedy speedily cures such dan
gerous symptoms as pain in the back,
inability to hold urine, burning
scalding pain in passing it, frequent
desire to urinate, especially at night,
the staining of linen by your urine
and all the unpleasant and dangerous
effects Oh the system produced by the
use of whiskey. wine or beer, DR..
David Kennedy's Favorte Remedy is
sold at all drug stores at $1.00 for a
large bottle six bottles for $500.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
TRANSLATION TOO LITERAL.
A German Students Laugh bio Trnns-
latiOn of bible Quota
tinn.

4 Chicago man who has just returned
from q trip abroad that combined sew
eral months of professional study with
q number of weeks of sightseeing tells
q funny story of German medical
student who was inordinately proud
of his knowledge of the English Ian
guage. 1t occurred during a recitation
hour in a well-known college in Berlin
and the lesson had just been inter
rupfed by the arrival Of several prorui-
nent Germans accompanying a dis
tinguished American traveller. The pro-
fessor in charge of the recitation saw
his opportunity to please the noted
visitor and Immediately proposed to his
linguistic pupil to translate a verse of
the German Bible into English. The
guest expressed his anticipatory pleas
ure, the Bible was opened, verse
chosen at random and the proud STU
dent stood up and assumed an inn
portant air.
The lines selected were from the
story of the apostels' sleep in the Gar
den of Gethsemane, "The spirit indeed
is willing, but the flesh is weak" which
the medical student treated in the free
and easy manner of 'The ghost indeed
Is ready, but the meat is poor"
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
TIE ENTRY INTO PONCE.
Enthusiastic Reception Of Gen. Miles
and His Troops by the
Natives.
S happy"

Late in the day Gen. Miles and Gen.
Wilson, in full dress uniform and beau
tiful white gloves, received the homage
of Ponce from the balcony OF the
alcuides palace, writes Richard Hard
ing Davis, in Scribner's. They made o
very fine appearance, but Us no men go
unshaven in Porto Rico except priests,
the populace were greatly disturbed to
find that it was Gen. Miles and not Gen.
Wilson who was the commanding Of
ficer of our army. "He should have
been an archbishop" they said, but
later he convinced them that the mus
tache does not make the soldier. Moth
ing could have been more enthusiastic
CT more successful that their open air
reception. The fire companies paraded
in their honor, and ran over three Of
their own men, which gave the local
Red Cross people grand chance to ap-
pear on the scene, each man wearing
four red crosses, to carry away the
wounded. This created some confusion,
as the firemen preferred to walk, bu:
TIC Neu SIobS PcoPiO "SAe "u'hs "AiN
bore them off on stretchers, whether
they would or no. The only thing want
ing to complete the picture was an
American flag. 1t was only u detail, but
the populace seemed to miss 1t. 1t was
about the only article with which the
expedition was not supplied. Frantic
cabling to Washington repaired the
loss, and within week flags were sent
all over the island and raised upon the
roofs Of many city hall. Ponce itself
held more foreign flags than we had
ever seen. Judging from their number
one would have thought that the popu-
lation was composed entirely Of Eng
lish, Germans, French and Swiss, and
members Of the Red Cross society.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06

"Such are the delusioas to which the
human senses and unde rstandincs are
susceptible" remarked the man who
doesn't care whether you comprehend
him or not that, logically speaking, it
is absolutely impossible 10 be absolute
ly sure OF anything"
Dear mel" exclaimed Mss Cayenne.
"l didn't know you were cne."
"What?"
"A weather prophet."-Washington
Star.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06

The doctor husr;et il aud called the
1ruggis, 20 one side.
"I've just been called to attend the
Sroesus baby" he said. land I've given
prescription that calls for nothing
but paregoric. When they send il over
here you must tell them IL will take nj
least an hour to put il up ard the cos,
will be S2.sr That's the only way TO
make them think I'm any good. the
medicines any good and you're any
good, and want to keep their busi-
ness. Chicago Post.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Artful DOundcr!

Browr-I say, old man, why don'tyou
pay Bloggs what you owe him? l
know for fact that he's hard up just
now.
ShufIlc-Ah! yes, but-er-7er-he
might feel hurt if he knew that l
thought he was sufficiently pressed for
money to actually require such small
sum. Better not. think; better not
Ally Sloper.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
A yictim of obedience.

Head of the Establishment-David.
you are fool!
David-Well, sir, l can't help it.
When you engaged me you told me to
initiate you, and I've done the best 1
could.-Tit-Bits.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Elkhart Normal School
and Business Institute.

The Elkhart Normal Shool and
Business Institute offers the best
Courses, Methods, and Instructions
in Pedagogy, Book keeping, Stenog.
raphy, Penmanship, Drawing. FL.
ocution and Oratory, and Physical
Culture, and at the lowest rates for
tuition and board. Students can
enter at any time. Circular, blotter,
and a copy Educational News free
on application. Address. DR.. II.
A. Mumaw, Sec'y, Elkhart. Ind.
3-23 On.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Exolu nations.

at must be hard for pebble men
whose turn has come to explain how
they came to get defeated"
Yes" answered senator Sorghum,
pensively; "but not as hard as 1t is for
some of 'em to explain how they come
to get elected. d."-Washirgton Star.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
His Advantage.

"I have never acted contrary TO the
dictates of my conscience" said the
rich man, proudly.
But some of us" replied the poor
man. regretfully. 'are not blessed with
such easy-going consciences." Chi
cago Post.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Heredity.

Loving Mother-I can't understand
what makes our boy Robert so fond Of
pedestrianism.
Fond Father-IIe gets that from me.
Didn't walk the floor with him for
weeks when he was u baby by?-Illustrated
American,
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
AnEx-Pre.ident Of the TrnnsvnnI.

Ex-President Pretorius, in the Trans
vaal, has retired to a humble vocation.
At a recent meeting of the town board
in Pretoria letter was read from him
requesting the board to engage Scotch
cart and pair of mules belonging to
klm for carrying gravel. He was be-
coming old, and would be glad II the
board would assist him to earn money
1t was decided to inform Mr.. Pretorius
that when there was vacancy his ap-
plication would be considered.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Never IInsty.

II am glad to sny," remarked Mr.,
Meekton. that 1 never spoke hasty
word to you
mo, Leonidas," answered his wife,
rather gently, II am willing to give you
credit for not hurrying about any
thing.r-Washingto Star.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
That Wna the Reason.

Boy-Mr. Smithers wants to know il
you'll lend him an umbrella. He says
you know him.
"You may say that do know him.
He will probably undertand why you
didn't bring the umbrella. STRAY
Storiea
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
AUDITORS NOTICE.

In the Estate OF I In the orphans Court
Nathan Arbogast, decd oil Snyder Co., Pa.
Notice is hereby given that the undersigned
Auditor appointed by saiu Court TO make distri.
button OF the balance appearing in the account
fled, TO and among the parties legally entitled,
win sit for that purpose at the Washington Ho'
tel at Middleburg Pa, on Tuesday, April IS.
is99, Mt II O'Clock A. NJ, where all parties In In.
terest are requested TO present their claims le-
galiy authenticated and In consonance with the
Rules OF Court, or be forever deDarred from par
ticipating In SAID fund.
w. e. HoUsEwoRTH.
March 20, 1899, Auditor.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Ono of Them.

''rhere goes one of the hardest
worked men in this town."
"How can that be possible? He's
rich, isn't hep"
"Yes, he has three married daughters
who work him for the support of their
husbands right along."-Chicago Daily
News.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Keeping II Up to tho Last.

DIX understand Windig, the at
torney, is seriously i'll.
Hix-Yes; met his physician this
morning, and he says he is lying at
deaths door.
Dix-That's Just like lawysr.-Chi-
cago Daily News.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Only Three.

Friend-The gossips have formulated
O regular indictment against your char
acter. They say you were terrible
firt while abroad. Do you plead guilty?
American Girl-Y-e-s; to three
counts.-N. Y. Weekly.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
His Polite breeding.

Maud Edith-The count did not make
any attempts to find out the amount of
your wealth, did he?
Ethel Alice-1Ie snid nothing to me,
of course. He Is too we'll bred to talk
shop.-Indianapolis journal.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Still in Possession.

"Why do you think they are on their
wedding Journey"
Didn't you notice that he had the
pocketbook when they bought those
oranges from the train boy ?"-ChicagO
Daily News.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06

Jack-Did you tell her that she was
the hansomest woman in the BALI
room?
Tom-No. / said she was the best
dressed.-Syracuse Herald.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
His Suggestion.

He-I wish our minister would prac-
tice some sort Of decentralization dur
ing Lent
She-What would you suggest?
He-Well, he might make his ser
mons half an hour shorter than usual.
N. Y. journal.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
WANTED !!

A Reliable man for Manager Of
Branch Office which l wish to open
in this vicinity, If your record is o.
X. here is a good opening. Kindly
mention the PosT when writing.
A. T. MORRIS. CINCINNATI, o.
Illustrated catalogue cts. postage.
2-9.6t.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Usually Rests with the Girl.

"You say the question is not whether
he will marry her?"
Not If you wish to be technically cor
rect. The question is whether she will
let him escape."-Chicago Post.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06

Mrs. Myles-That woman's husband
always looks to me as if he was hiding
from his wife.
Mrs. Styles-Well, it certainly can't
be his feet!-Yonkers Statesman.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Enrth,. Hottest Region.

The hottest region on the earth is on
The southwestern coast of Persia, where
Persia borders the gulf of the same
name. For 40 consecutive days in July
md August the thermometer has not
fallen lower than 100 degrees, night or
DAY, and often mounted as high as 12S
degrees.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Sure.

"Are you sure you love her?" asked
his chose friend.
Absolutely" answered the young
man. i've been her partner at whist
when she forgot what trumps were, and
didn't lose my temper."-Washington
Star
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
A Poor Nsun.

Lawyer-You say deceased was
poor man?
Witness-Yes. sir; very poor.
Lawyer-Had you ever been inside Of
his house?
Witness-No. sir; but knew that he
kept seven dogs.-lIarlem Life.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06

One said her lover must be brave:
One said her lover must be tall,
A third would have man for her slave;
The fourth would like him rich-thats oil
Chicago Record.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Human NQturc,

When. poor and low. he bcgs for food
They mock, the sneerinG multitude;
When. rich and great, he needs no bite,
They give him dinners every night.
Il. A. w. Bulletin.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
Glass in lihctOric.

james, in what way can you Justify
the use of the expression, AN itch for
notoriety?'"
"Well, when man gets an itch for
notoriety he begins to scratch around
for it."-Chicago Tribune.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06

ITS funny can't trust you with
baby for short half hour without your
doing something ridiculous. What or
earth did you carry him up in the a,ti;'
for?"
Just for high bawl, my love-
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
In Tint Cnac.

Would you say honest politics is, or
'arer"
/, "Ts,' Of course. Honest politics is al
ways dngular."-Indianapolis Journal.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06

"Inoticed, Mr.. Starboard, that you got
the wishbone at dinner to-day. What
did you wish?"
~ wished, madam, that there was
more meat on it."-N. Y. Herald.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1899-04-06
MEDICAL WORK
FOR MEN,EREE::::: !:

SEND NO MONEY. My new revised scentiC t
work iTeat,n ns on every weakness and disease lr-
clttnr to men IL Just from the press. Every MAJ,
10 matter what his occupAtIC or position in ne
Ui' lind this work unlike AM thing ever published.
Ii - of vital interest to thc married or unmHrgi"j
20 the hsalthy and strong or to the weak Bni
broken down. While the edition lasts will senc
O.. copy securely aoaisd in n plain wrapper, post
nga pTopsia, to every man vino wr.tss for 1t. mis-
,Iti.ou is limited and those desiring "a copy must
g.r.te promptly. Address II. VI. Ross, NJ. D., FYo-
HEhinn Department C. l,b CLARK ST.. n L. Ger.
MonIos. Chicago. Illinois
The Monticellonian., 1899-12-22
FREE OF CHARGE.

Any adult suffering with a cold settled on the breast, bronchitis, throat or lung troubles of any ma. ture who will call at R. E. Vance Bordeaux's, Monticello, Ark, or Bailey < Spivey's, Collins, Ark, will be presented with sample bottle of Boschee's German Syrup, free of charge. Only one bottle given 10 one person, and none to children without order from parents.
 No throat or lung remedy ever had such a sale as Boschee's Ger man Syrup Tn all parts of the civilized world. Twenty years ago millions of bottles were given away, and your drug gists will tell you it's success was marvellous. It is really the only Throat and Lung Remedy gener- ally endorsed by physicians, One 75 cent bottle will cure or prove it's value. Sold by dealers in all civilized countries.
The Monticellonian., 1899-12-22
MISS PILLAR WEDS.

MT. Walter s. Allen and Miss ldee Tillar were united E mar riage at Christ church at 6 o'clock last evening, Rev. w. E. Thomp- son, pastor of tle First NJ. E. Church, officiating. The cere- mony was witnessed by q large number of invited guests. After a wedding supper at the residence of the brides parents at PIP Spring street, the happy couple left on the northbound cannon ball for northern and eastern points and will be at home in New Bedford, Mass, after January Ist.
 Sometime before the hour set for the ceremony the church began to fill with guests, who admired in audible tones the beautiful deeora- tions, consisting of Palms and roses, which almost covered the pulpit.
 At 6 o'clock sharp Prof. Lan- thurn, who was presiding at the organ, began to play the strains of the wedding march and the bridal party entered the church.
 The bridesmaids were Misses Mittie Holmes, Jamie Dunklin, Marguerite Miller, Narnee Martin and Irene Adams. All were beau- tifully attired in evening costumes. The male attendants were Messrs. Chas. K. Lincoln, Farrar l.. Me Cain, Claude C. Thompson, Allen N. Johnson and Jamie Zones.
 The maid of honor, Miss Alma