New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1899-04-04
TIE TALK OF THE DAY.
Some London papers refer to the wife OF Lor'
Curzon as the Letter OF Asia"

Some London papers refer to the wife OF LORD
Curzon as the Letter OF Asia"
She Costs Money.-'Dear girl" he said rap
turously $780, .,,s
prefer not TO have you use that adjective" she
why not?" he demanded.
at reminds me too much OF what papa some
times says TO me."-tChicago Post
The Boston Transcript tells a story Of Bos-
ton woman a member OF the Womans Christian
Temperance Union. who was recently travelling 10
the Pacific Coast over the Northern Pacihc Rai-
road Now North Dakota Is rigid prohibition
State. and the dning-cars have this notice posted
lin in them: mo intoxicating liquors will be
served while the train is passing through the state
of North Dakota" The train had been rolling
along through that interminabe State a long time
when the Boston woman who Is Interested III
temperance came into the dinng-car for her din
ner Casting her eye out OF the car-window upon
q somewhat changed landscape she said to the
walter with purely geographical interest: Are
We still I'm North Dakota" mo. ma am" said
he. alertly and with hospitable grin; "whatl you
take to drink. ma'am?"
Let me See" said the stock Spectator. didn't
you once enter tract OF land In the mining regions
yes. and like to lose my little fortune" an
swerei the rural caller , he "a n ry Pace wal
I'd strike copper There was no drilIln through
the plaguey stun essn I'd buy lot NOR more tools
70 co1ld raise suthin' and git plenty OF water
detroit Free Press.
The Editor OF The Alton (Kan) Empire" made
the following personal explanation in his last issue
"Our wife was taken III Wednesday evening two
weeks ago which required our continual presence
at home on Thursday last our sister arrived from
A,chison TO help care for Mrs. Ford and the chill
dren. and on Sunday unfortunate enough to
fall down cellar and break her arm. so with SIT
ting up night and day and waiting on sick wife
and a crippled sister. and caring for couple OF
children with temper enough to stand up for their
rights under any circumstances, we've had what
you might call extra edition OF trouble.
But" they expostulated. you have painted the
Yes" replied the painter. quite So but KIND
any a. joints in her legs. What of 1t? Why, she
can't kick. OF course" 1T. ..
be unreal is not necessarily devoid Of uny-(De-
trot Journal
The following pathetic advertisement appeared
the other day in n Lebanon. Penn, paper:
public Notice. hereby notify all saloon and ho-
telkecpers. any other persons. not to furnish
liquor Of any kind to me- I am making an effort
to quit the drinking habit, and cannot do so as long
as any one Will give me liquor"
THE sOOT-LADEN BANNER
Oh, say. can you by the dawns early light
What was plain to be seen at the twights last
cleaning?
Whose broad trail OF foul smudge thro the hours
CT the night
From the factories we love was so flthlly
streaming?
Oh soft coal II Is cheap
And big profits reap.
And this be motto. ITO hell with the peopi'
And the soot-laden banner In triumph shall wave
Ger the land OF the boss and the home OF the
slave!
Here are two stories from Sir VI. f. Grant-Dufs
diary The first records the saying Of Sir F. Doyle
when Lord Houghtons death rumored that
his exit is the result Of too many entrees" The
second concerning a definition which Gladstone
gave Of a deputaton. Is also given In the diary
II is "A noun OF numbers signifying many, but not
signlfying much"
Changing His Mind--'I am sorry" said the mag
azlne editor courteousy, but we not accepting
any short stories now"
''Dut the OF this story" said the confident
contributor is laid In place that nobody ever
heard Of and Is written In n language that no
understand.
Then why didn't you say beforeT" exclaimed
the magazine editor. ms he grasped II eagerly
In refusing TO grant divorce to a Kansas
man the other day. the Judge said: There is no
statutory evidence here. This man married a d.
vorced woman when she was twenty years old and
lived with her until she IL thirty. He wants TO
beat her children around with stick She called
him a devil and an old fool. and from his own tes-
tin,ony the woman seems have been about right"
nerve to claim she first saw the light In 1879 II
would judge her too harshly. Perhaps she
INFANT the arc light "-Qndianapolis Journal