New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1899-05-29
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

The Springfield Mass) Union" issues q beauttl-
fully illustrated Industrial edition. which gives in
succinct form complete review OF the industrial
and commercial activities OF Springfield and Hamp-
den County. The Union" ranks easily among the
best newspapers OF Massachusetts, and its editorial
utterances are characterized by broad and loyal
Americanlsm.
The mikmaid with the picture hat and the bro
caded silk skirt tossed her head.
rerson" she exclaimed but it's different In art"
And after all. to be perfectly candid. there is
nothing essentially degrading about milking an art
cow.-(Detrot Journal
An old-time fddlers' contest took place the other
day In Charlestown. Ind. The following prizes
were offered for the best performance Of the tunes
named: Money Musk" pair OF sheep shears;
Leather Brooches" cutter; "Old Dan
Tucker" pair Of pants mo one barred; Rye
Straw fine hat Pop Goes the Weasel" 81 worth
Of Jewelry: Devils Dream" 81 worth Of groceries;
Girl ] Left Behind Me-" 81 worth OF cigars:
"Suwanee River" 81 worth OF groceries; Arkansas
Traveller" 81 in cash: Dixie" so cents worth OF
soap; Yankee Doodle" large coreepot; "Raggedy
Bill" rocking chair "Mocking Bird" worth of
lumber "Guilderoy." twenty-five pounds Of -four;
Home, Sweet Home" 81 worth OF goods; Flowers
of Edinburgh" fine hat.
The owner OF a cigar-stand tells a story on one
venton. The conductor moved up TO the counter
what kind will you have?" asked tho clerk.
Fair Please" said he. nt-mindedly.-(Detroit
Free Press.
Kansas City recently passed an ordinance making
wide tires vehicles compulsory In the city.
More nformation.-Tommy-Paw what do they
put water in stocks for? , ~,
Mr.. Figg-To soak the Investors with, my son.
Indianapolis Journal.
A story is told of a woman In England who UNI
expectedly came into fortune and promptly
hunted up a country house. where she played the
role OF chatclane to the maror born according TO
her own ideas OF the part. One day some OF her
old-time friends came to her. and she con-
descended to show them all over the place
What beautiful chickens!" exclaimed the visit
ors when they to the poultry yard.
Yes All prize birds" haughtily explained the
hostess.
do they lay every day7'
"oh. they could. OF course: but (grandiloquenty)
in our position 1t isn't necessary for them to do
So"
enterfanng callers "f in the paror you came down
stairs 80 nosily that you could be heard all over
that Now. 60 back and come down the stairs like
Frances retired and after the lapse of a minutes
re-entered the parlor.
Did you hear me come down stairs this Time
no dear l am glad you came down quietly.
to Come down ' noisiiy for see that You can come
down quietly II you VIII; Now tell these ladies' how
time while the first time you made so much
noise"
Tho last time slid down the banisters." ex-
planned Frances-(Harper's Bazaar
Uncle 'Rastus." says a Southern paper used to
preach to the colored population while his master
preached 10 the white folk Rastus always took
his text from his masters sermon.
"Massa." said 'Rastus one Saturday. wat am
de tex for de mawnnT
MY text" said his master. will be, And the
multitude went unto Him with divers diseases"
SO the next day Uncle 'Rastus confronted his
hock and said:
Ma brevren. do tex o. de sermon dis mawnin'
am, An de mutitude-de multitude-went unto
Him with dahves diseases An all want 10 say
right here dat de mumps. de mumps. may be cured
by pheesishun and dere Is de grip, wut may be
cured by a pheesishun; and even the yellow feber
maught be cured by do doctars but dem wuts got
de dahves diseases, dey mus 80 straight to do
Lawd Himself"