The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-10-11
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FUN WITH A BURGLAR.
Victim Fcigned Being Asleep and the
Intruder Was Bafllcd.

The burglar who had served a short
term In the Bridewell for being caught
while trying to leave house he had
entered without tho authority of the
owners was engaged in the practice of
his profession again.
They don't catch me in no self-act-
in cage this time" he said to him
self, as he raised n rear window of the
house he had selected as the scene of
his operations and cautiously insinu-
ated his head through tho opening.
Il don't see no cards tollln' me It's
all right, and not to make noise, and
will | please shut the pantry window
SOS tho things Won't freeze. | guess
it's all straight"
With II whispered caution to his con
federate, who was to remain on guard
outside he crawled noislessly In, stood
few moments to listen. and then pro-
ceeded to pentrate further into tho in
terror.
Finding only a few things worth
stealing on the lower floor he started
up the stairway.
One of the steps creaked and he
stopped instantly.
Not the slightest sound came from
the rooms above, however, and, after
waiting a reasonable time he moved
forward and upward with great eau
ton
Entering what seemed to be the main
upper room he glanced about him.
Sufficient light came in from the
streetlamp across the way to enable
him to see bed In one corner occu-
pied by II man whose deep and regular
breathing furnished sufficient evidence
thnt he was sound asleep.
The mans clothing was hanging at
the foot of the bed.
The burglar moved In that direction.
Instantly he heard II loud whisper:
Don't do that You'll wake him!"
Annoyed and alarmed at what he
conceived to be a wholly unauthorized
and bungling attempt ON the part of
his confederate to take n hand In the
fine work of the job instead of remain
ing at his post of duty outside he turn
ed his head and moved back step or
two.
ST" came the whisper again, loud
er than before.
The burglar glanced at the sleeper,
who had not stirred, and then moved
toward the door, with the intention of
adm inisterIng Il voIceless rebuke to
his reckless confederate.
You blamed fool" whispered the
voice again You haven't got sense
enough to rob a sandbank. Let me
do thisl"
The burglar peered into tho gloom
Of the upper hallway.
Not seeing his pal he stepped out
through the door.
STOP" exclaimed n loud, determined
voice, III you move another inch in
this direction III put bullet through
you!"
lie jumped back and dartod In the
direction of the front window.
iii. therel" spoke another voice.
Don't 50 that way, either! Can't
you see you're running right into II
gum"
Trembling in every limb he stood
near the centre of the room uncertain
| what 10 do.
He put his hand to his hip pocket.
"If you make another motion with
| that hand, exclaimed u voice from
| somewhere In the darkness, "rll
| shoot I've got the drop on you!"
He stole another glance at the sleep
or.
The man had not stirred
The burglar felt a cold sweat break
ing out all over him.
Then, as the savage yell of u fierce
dog, apparently under the bed, came
Riaflllngly to his ear, he jumped with
a yell of terror to the side window.
five or six feet away plunged through
IT, carrying the sash with him, and
rolled down the kitchen roof into n
deep snowbnnk, from which he emery
ed a second later and fled like IL deer,
followed by his bewIdered confed-
crate.
He had made the horrible blunder
of trying to rob professional ven
trlloquist who happened to be awake.
Chicago Tribune.