New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1899-07-03
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

Az. long aeo" saws The Cleveland Plain
Daoler" .tbe pastor dned with the family. and
Master Tommy at the table. lie pehaVeu
nretty we'll until the cake was brought IN linen nc
suddanlv lurched forward and snatched the piece
he sized up as the biggest
...Whv Tommy cried his distressed mother, you
ora forgetting that DR.. Choker Is here
The how gave the worthy pastor whitening look
Nav | amt forgettn' it, he snarled; X he
wasn't here ia git two pieces!
"I love YOU" he whispered.
Ernestine trembled and regarded him perplex-
ediy -, uho os,,od borse,e cor
zoos INV complexion deceive him."
For # was her misfortune to lack confidence In
herself-(Detrot journal.
The Toronto Mail and Empire" quotes A. A.
Br,rneau. a Canadian Member OF Parliament az FOL
lows:
Il am glad 70 tell you that the DOMINION Oh YAH
ada is now ruled by French-Canadians.
Yes French Canadians are now the leaders or
Canada. and will tell you their names
They are Sir Wnfrid Laurier, Joseph Israel
Tarte and \. a. Bruneau
The old times passed away, and new era
has arrived.
Ontario newspaper present so that could tell 1t TO
them.
THE French-Canadians are the rulers OF
Canada"
His Predicament.-'I see" said the afrable friend.
that YOU occasionally drop into poetry NO 81,
no. answered the laureate. nercely. II don't
drop into poetry. I'm pushed ihp II o' t"e "o'-
eminent washington star.
Saws THE Boston Transcript: Talk about your
societies with long names! Can any or them peat
tho Massachusetts Naval Brigade Veteran Associa-
lion Of the Spanish War? Why. the name OF the
NJ \ b. V. A. O. T. S. W. is very nearly as long
as the war itself"
over the Table.-The comedian boarder reached
'o' miss i De Be- We're" he said addressing the sweet
singer have you heard the story OF the hard
boiled ego
You haven't? Why us old"
Then to save her life. the landlady couldn't tell
whether he alluded to the story or to the egg
Chicago News
The Mennonites Of Pennsylvania. whose general
conference recently interdcted the use OF tobacco
{, any form do not propose TO let this prohibition
Interfere with their worldly affairs. The farmers OF
the colony keep right planting tobacco. getting
around II by saying that II their industry is so dis
pleasing the Lord the tobacco Will not grow
The outlook at present Is for a bountifu crop.
The Sort Of Batter-Coacher 0oudly)-Two are
OUT Play for the batter o,-,..-
what sort OF batter these men playing for?
Mr.. Mann-Dough. madam.-(Judge.
When Eugene Debs lectured the other evening in
the Grand Opera House OF St Paul. there were
only eighty people in the audience.
Uls Reference-Chief ito commercial traveller
seeking a pace)-Do you know how 10 talk up
goods 10 customers?
Approximations me to turn on this monograph
with n conversation between customer and my
sef-(FTegende Batter.
woman nnety-seven years old In the North OF
England, has just died OF excessive tea-drinkng.
why do you carry your purse in your hand in
stead OF In your pocket" he asked
For economy" she replied IF pickpocket
ever got into my pocket he'd more than likely tear
my gown. while II he grabs the purse out OF my
hand the loss would be only three cents. some
samples and a postage stamp."-tChicago Post.
DR.. COLES an eminent surgeon OF Dublin who
died In 1893 was remarkable for his plain dealing
with himself. In his fee book he had many such
candid entries az the following: For giving in
erectual advice for deafness. guinea" For
attempting TO draw out the stump OF a tooth one
guinea" For telling him that he more III
than | was. one guinea" For nothing that |
know OF except that he probably thought he did not
pay ne enough last time. one guinea"
Each day along my way greet
A dainty maid. her face is sweet;
Gold IL her hair. her eyes blue,
Her robe and hat are chic and new.
Though great her charm II does not bind.
Aye, though love, | still am free
wax girl In the window she.
-lChicaRo Record