The Greenville times. [volume] (Greenville, Miss.) 1868-1917, 1899-07-08
"R0uts's Ruasr
JrHNs0N cry. Tenn, March 10 ls1i

My DEAR OLD SoLTARY-Who m@ndS .
your soclss2 Do you sew on your own F
buttons? How long does it take You 10 .
thread the needle? Why don't You /.
brush the cobwebs out of your soul, /.
and straighten up, and get a good wife
to do all of these things you? What /
pleasure do you find in playing the /
came of solitaire? Hearts are trnmps,
and you cannot play a happy game in
this world without partner 1t Is not
good that man should live alone. The
world owes you a rib, and you ought to
have your old ribs cracked If you don't
collect the debt.
Why don't you rig up your matrimo.
NAL tackle, old boy, and go angling for
"fWu? Your old pantaloons look
mighty lonesome hanging there in that
dusty wardrobe without some calico to
keep them company. Your room is
poor paradise without fair Eve TO
adorn it, | know what is the matter
with you you are afraid Of grocery
bills, and dry goods bills, ana doctor
bills, and curtain lectures, and the
overthrow of your independence and
freedom of speech, or else You are
afraid to pop the question, and thus
lose many a golden opportunity by
simply looking at her and grinning like
a basketful of 'possum heads. Perhaps
vou have popped the question and
got No for an answer, but remember
that there are as good fish IN the sea
as were ever caught, and remember
that she is somewhere in this wide,
wide world waiting for thee, darling
Comb the feathers out of your whis-
llers. and put little bears oil on your
hair, if You have any hair, and spruce
up. Don't expect her to court YOU but
do the counting yourself. Press your
suit gradually; and when you see She is
determined to kick, kick first, for
| then is the time above all other times
to show your independence. A true
woman loves an independent man next
to money.
Are you accommodating a fortune? If
so. for whom2 Did you never hear
"Private" John Aliens story of the di.
vision of an old bachelors estate:
When they were dividing it out among
his kinsfollz, one disgruntIed relative
felt that he hadn't received his just
proportion, and complainingly said: 81
sometimes wish the old man hadn't
died"
If you are poor, you need good
woman to help you get rich; if you are
rich, you need good woman to helr
you get poor. In either case she is
success.
For man to pas through this worlC
without a helpmeeJ s a strange philos
ophy to me; and yet have seen mel
with as noble hearts as ever throbbed
full of splendid sentiment and in low
with the beautiful, live out their day
in single wretchedness.
Baehelordom is habit; the longe
INDUCED in, the harder to break, unit
its victim is so infatuated with it tina
it seems impossible to quit. He be
comes 'sot" in his ways; and all tn
frills. and bangs, and bustles, an,
gaudy shirt waists, and hower@d an,
teathered hats when the ul.liner's ar
can fashion, and all the EcwitchinI
chances and persuasive smiles whic
beauty can bestow move him not
neither do they unmove him.
One of the attendant misfortunes Q
bachelor is Observation-Disclosures,
once heard of an absent-minded bach
elor who bought a pair of new glove.
and went home with them and aston
ished his nephews and nieces by throw
ing the gloves in the fire and spittin
on the bed. Of course he intended t
spit in the fire and throw his gloves o
the bed. The best way to cure absen'
mindedness is to get a live, wide-awakt
talking wife, whose tongue will be
constant reminder to You, and 500
teach you to think the right way.
If all men should follow your plan {
life. what would become of society an
civilization? All the homes that no
glow with the light of love and rim
with the laughter and song of childre
would soon be transformed into the 5
lent and sour domiciles of old maiG
and lust such old things as you. | d
not mean to speak harshly or to woun
your feelings, but only to show you tn
error of your way.
If you would enjoy life, you mu.
have a happy home; and if you wonl
have a happy home, it must glow wit
happy smiles and ring with happ
voices; and happy hands must keep
neat and clean and plant flowers at tn
door.
. Home is not merely four square walls,
Though with pictures hung and gtldedi
Home is where affection calls
= Filled with shrines the heart hath bullded.
Home-go watch the faithful dove
I Sailing through the heaven above us.
Home is where there 5 one to love;
Home is where there's one to love US.
: l have no doubt you will turn L
:. your nose and charge me with sent
mentality. | plead guilty to the so
impeachment. | am sentimental, an
| have but little respect for the ma
who is not. 1t is the soul of religio
and patriotism; it is the Likelihood of a
society: it is the essence of love. Ever
soul that ever found its way from cart
y to heaven was waited there on IL
u wings of sentiments every brave spir
II who ever faced death for his COUNT
+ was led by sentiment to the battlefield
q every beautiful picture is a sentime'
II reflected from the heart on the canva
> and every creation of the sculptor
c chisel is the silent image of sent
ment. What power is it which lea,
IS the bride and groom to the altar 10 Sc
I 81 l. t. = IA, F,,,as4 ~ mt