davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
A Kipiing Poem.

Several years ago Fred d. Under
wood, now general manager OF the
Baltimore and Ohio Railroad. named
two stations in the upper peninsula OF
Michigan "Rudyard" and "kipling."
one being in an agricultural country
and the other in an iron ore district.
Some time later u mutual friend in
formed Kipling Of Mr.. Underwood's
action, and the celebrated author sent
Mr.. Underwood his photograph with
the following lines on the back:
"RJrDYARD" AND "KIPLING."
"Wise is the child who knows his SIRE"
The ancient proverb ran,
put wiser far the man who knows
How, where and when his offspring
For who the mischief would suppose
I've sons in Michigan?
Yet am saved from midnight Ills.
That warp the soul of man
They do not make me walk the hoor.
Nor hammer at the DOCTORS door.
They deal In wheat and Iron ore.
My sons In Michigan.
Oh. Tourist In the Pullman car
(By Cooks or Raymond's plan).
Forgive u parents partial view:
nut. maybe, you have children toe
So let me introduce to you
MY sons In Michigan.
RUDYARD KIPLINo.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
An Excellent Combination.

The pleasant method and beneficial
effects of the well known remedy,
SYRUP OF FIGs, manufactured by the
CALIFORNIA FIs SYRUP Co., illustrate
the value of obtaining the liquid lnxa-
tive principles Of plants known to be
incidentally laxative and presenting
them in the form most refreshing to the
taste and acceptable to the system. It
Is the ono perfect strengthening laxa-
tive, cleansing the system effectually.
dispclling colds, headaches and fcvers
gently yet promptly and enabling ono
to overcome habitual constipation per-
manently. Its perfect freedom from
every Objectionable quality and sub
stance, and its acting on the kidneys,
liver and bowels, without weakening
or irritating them, mako it the ideal
laxative.
In the process Of manufacturing figs
are used, as they are pleasant to tho
taste, but the medicinal qualities of tho
remedy are obtained from senna and
other aromatic plants, by q method
known to the CALIFoRNIA Flo SYRUP
Co. only. In order to get its beneficial
effects and to avoid limitations, please
remember the full name Of the Company
printed on the front of every package.
CALIFORNIA FIG SYRUP co.
BAN FnANoIsco CAL
LOUISVILLE. KY. NEW YORK. n. z.
For sale by all Druggista.-Price Soc. per bottle
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
Are You Using Allen. roor-E.s.f

1t Is the only cure for Swollen.
Smarting, Burning, Sweating Feet,
Corns and Bunions. Ask for Aliens
Foot Ease, a powder to be shaken Into
the shoes. AT all Druggists and Shoe
Stores. CSC. Sample sent FREE. Ad-
dress, Allen s. Olmsted. Leroy, N. Y.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
Do Your r... Aoh. and p.rp,

Shake into your shoes. Aliens Foot
Ease. a powder for the feet. 1t makes
tight or New Shoes feel Easy. Cures
Corns. Bunions, Swollen. Hot and
Sweating Feet. AT all Druggists and
Shoe Stores. 25c. Sample sent FREE.
Address Alien S. OImsted. Leroy. N. Y.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
An Unselash PRAYER,

When you are old. and quarrelsome,
and disagrccable. pray that 1t will be
your fate to live In the country. where
few will see you.-Atchison Globe.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
Halls Cntnrrh Curc
Is a constitutional cure. Price, 75c.

John. John: wake up I hear burglars
downstairs. "Lemmc lone, Laura: you
know I'm booked for that football match:
can't go down and get all banged up
by those fellows" +"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
Tho Point.

"Whnt's your position on this expan-
sion question: said QulZzlcby.
"That's just It," replied the chronic
oiiiccseekcr. What position do getT'
Philadelphia North American.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

Piso's Cure for Consumption has been
n God-send to me.-Wm. B. Mcclellan,
Chester, Florida, Sept. IL, 1905.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

FITS rcrmsncntiyCr 40 nts or nervousness aftei
nrst Day. OF DR.. kliue's Great Nerve Restorer
seud for FREE e1.O0 trial bottle and treatise
d. r. H. KLINE Ltd. a3l Arch ST.. rhilAdolphtA. Pa
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

"Cicmentine is awfully matter of fact"
"She is?" Yes: she quit speaking to me
because she dreamed | said n whole lot
of mean things about her..
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

spat." What now "Onc head has
cridcd to Join tch Audubon Club and the
other one won't"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
' ~ RUDYXRD KIPLINo.

AREN'T we going to- pay the street
sprinkler this year. Edmundg NO.
those people on each side of us wouldn't
employ him last year and now that they
do sprinkle I'm going to let them see how
they like II "
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

Jack. do you believe In palmistry?"
Yes / do; when IL man gives me the
lips OF his fingers know l can't borrow
money of him."
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

'"Tubbs. does spring make you lazy
No: II makes go many other people lazy
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

Your Chicago climate is unique"
Isn't 1t, thought Nine months January
and three months July"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

'How does your medical son like h
partncr7" Hes immense. you see. m
son gets up new diseases. and his partn'
cures them"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11
The Ideal I.axatIve.

No more ancient pill poisons and black draughts,
hut upto-dAtc scientific hat .nlcss. pnAt, ble po-
tent Cascarets Candy Cathartc druggists, lOc, 2Sc.
iOc.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

Mrs. wlnslow's Soothing Syrup.
For children tecthnH sofcns tho gums, reduces In
1Hinatun Aays pain. wind collie &c bottle
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-05-11

I: sc s:;:s s.: :':s IS. 1hompson's Eye Wassr.
wASTED-Case of bad health tnat R.IP.A'S's
- iii not bcpent. Send cents to Ripans Chemical
Co.. New York. for 10 samples and 100 testimonials
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Too Much For Belief.

One of the brethren went to Knox
vile last August and fell by the way
side-he got drunk down there. After
several months the news Of his fall
reached his rural home, and he was
brought up before the church.
"Brethren," he said, 81 admit I got
drunk in Knoxville last August, but I
didn't mean to do it. How I have suf-
fered in my conscience and in my pride
God alone knows, and I trust he has
forgiven me. Brethren, I want you to
forgive me. I didn't go to get drunk. I
took a glass or two of light wine with
a friend, and later took a bottle of beer
on ice, and them
"Brethren,' interrupted a good old
brother in the amen corner. 81 would
be willing to forgive the brother for his
fall if he would make a clean breast of
it and tell the truth. But l move we
turn him out for lying. He has lied to
us. Whoever heard Of ice in August? 2"
And they turned him out because he
dared to say that he had seen ice in Au-
gust .-Sweetwater (Tenn. Telephone.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Mother.

A ragged woman was crossing the
corner of a public park in a large city
where the children of the poor are &C.
customed to play, many of them bare
footed. A burly policeman stationed
at the corner watched the woman sus-
%piciously. Half way across she stopped
and picked up something which she hid
in her apron. In an instant the police
man was by her side. With a gruff
voice and threatening manner he de-
manded:
"What are you carrying off in your
apron?"
The woman seemed embarrassed and
refused to answer. Thereupon the off
Ger of the law, thinking that she had
doubtless picked up a pocketbook which
she was trying to make away with,
threatened to arrest her unless she told
him at once what she had in her apron.
At this the woman reluctantly unfold
ed her apron and disclosed a handful of
broken glass.
In stupid wonder the policeman ask
ed:
"What do you want with that stuff
A flush passed over the woman face
then she answered simply:
eff you please, sir, I just thought I'd
take it out Of the way Of the children's
feet. "-Detroit Free Press.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
A GRIM
An EmperOr's Death fastened b;
RehearsinE His Own Funeral.

An Emperor's Death fastened by
R~ehearsinG His Own Funeral.
Emperor Charles V Of Spain brought
about his death by rehearsing his own
funeral. For the last two years of his
life. after resigning the scepter of Spain
and the Netherlands to his son Philip.
in 1866, Charles retired to the monas-
terry of Yuste. in Estremadura. and
there lived a %cloister life in close inter-
course with the monks, devoting much
time to religious exercises. During this
period. prompted it may be by the ex-
ample of Cardinal de la Marck, who
for several years before his death. in
1928. had annually rehearsed his own
%obsequies, the emperor. in the summer
of 1858. formed the resolution to cele-
brate his own funeral before he died.
Accordingly. on Aug. 80 of that year,
the grim farce was carried out with the
most elaborate ceremonial. The imperial
domestics marched with black tapers in
their hands, and the emperor. clad in
sable weeds, himself followed, wearing
his shroud. While the solemn mass for
the dead was sung before the high altar
in the cathedral Charles gave up his ia
per to the priest, typifying thereby his
resignation of life, and was solemnly
laid in his coffin. The ceremony closed
with sprinkling holy water on his body
then, all the attendants retiring, the
doors were shut, and Charles rose from
his narrow bed and withdrew to his pri-
vate apartment.
The damping of the graveclothes in
duced a chill. which. aided no doubt by
the mental depression caused by the
grewsome ceremony, induced a fever
which ended in his death three weeks
later, on the 21st Of September. 1888.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Easy Way to Be Generous.

In the Baptist church Of a New Eng
land village was an old man who had
all the Christian graces save one, and
that one was the grace Of l~iberality.
He would do anything in the world for
the cause Of religion but give up his
money. At the close of the financial
year 1869 the church found itself $40C
in debt. A church meeting was called,
and it was voted to circulate a subscrip'
ton paper on the spot and endeavor tc
thus raise the sum needed. This was
done, and the old gentleman did not
put his name on the paper. The result
was rather disheartening, 5000 only
having been pledged. Silence reigned
for a moment, when one of the most
generous men in the church moved that
"we double our subscriptions. In
stantly the old gentleman was on his
feet, and with extraordinary fervo1
CT led, 81 second the notion
He evidently felt that he was thus
doing his part in fastening a most de.
sirable result. Round Table.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Trfcked the Vicious Camel.

A valuable camel working in an oil
mill in Africa was beaten by it's driver.
Seeing hat the camel had treasured up
the injury and was only waiting a ia
vorable chance for revenge, the driver
kept a strict watch upon the animal.
Time passed away. The camel, know
ing that it was watched, was quiet and
obedient, and the driver began to think
that the beating was forgotten, when
one night, after several months had
gone by, the man was sleeping on a
raised platform in the mill, while, as is
customary, the camel was stabbed in a
corner.
Happening to awake, the driver saw
by the bright moonlight that when all
was quiet the animal looked cautiously
around, rose softly and, stealing toward
a spot where a bundle of clothes and a
burnoose thrown carelessly on the
ground resembleG a sleeping figure,
cast itself with violence upon them,
rolling with all it's weight and tearing
them most v%iciously with it's teeth.
Satisfied that its revenge was complete,
the camel was returning to it's corner
when the driver sat up and spoke. At
the sound Of his voice and realizing the
mistake it had made, the animal was
so mortified at the failure and discov-
cry Of it's scheme that it dashed its head
against the wall and died on the spot.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
HONESTY THE BEST POLICY.

Honest goods, honest prices and
honest dealings will surely bring sue
cess. Every hour proves it. The last
days of the nineteenth century show
nothing more clearly. We believe this
fact and Jul works demonstrate our be-
lief. Our goods are warranted to be
exactly as represented. that is honest ;
our goods are guaranteed to give per-
feet satisfaction, that is honest. If any
article Of jewelry Of our manufacture
does not give perfect satisfaction we
will refund the money paid for such
articles; that, too, is honest.
james Wheeler of Billings, Mont.
has a complete assortment of our goods
in his store for sale at prices that defy
competition. These goods are made
from rolled gold, gold filed or solid
gold stock, and are warranted to give
perfect satisfaction or the money will
be refunded. W. F. MAIN CO.,
Eastern Factory corner Friendship and
Eddy streets, Providence, R. L.
Western Factory Largest in the world)
under process of construction at East
Iowa City, la. Over 50, 900 feet of
floor space. 92-f-4
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Her Age at Monte Carlo.

A curious story comes from Monte
Carlo the heroine of which has lost a
large sum through excusable female
vanity. She entered the gaming saloon
while a former friend of hers was win
ming in a sweeping style that seemed
destined to break the bank.
81 am so glad to see you here, prince,
and in such luck, too!' she exclaimed.
'Do tell me a lucky number. It is sure
to win, for you are nov in the vein."
The prince generously placed a pile
Of gold louis before the %vivacious lady,
whose beauty had successfully defied
the effects of 36 winters, and said:
"Put it all on the number of your
years and reap a golden harvest"
The lady reflected, hesitated and then
placed the pile on 81.
An instant later the croupier sang
out:
"Thirty-six red wins!'
"Heavens!' muttered the lady as
she tainted. "Thirty-six is exactly my
ageH'
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
He Caught O'COnnell.

Daniel O'Connell, the famous orator,
when taking a ride in the neighborhood
of his house. had occasion to ask an
urchin to open a gate for him. The lit
tie fellow complied with much alacrity
and looked up with such an honest
pleasure at rendering the slight service
that O'Connell. by way Of saying some
thing-anything-as.ed:
"What's your namt, ny boy?'
"Daniel O'Connell, ,:r,' replied he
stoutly.
"And who's your father?' demand
ed the astonished liberator.
"Daniel O'Connell. sir"
O'Connell muttered a word or two
below his breath and then added aloud
"When / see you again. I'll give you
sixpence."
Riding briskly on, he soon forgot the
incident and fell to thinking of graver
matters. when, after travelling some
miles. he found his path obstructed by
some fallen timber, which a boy was
stoutly endeavoring to remove. On
looking more closely he discovered it to
be the same boy he had met in the
morning.
"What!' cried he. 'How do you
come to be here now?"
"You said, sir, the next time you
seen me you'd give me sixpence,' said
the little fellow, wiping the perspira-
ton from his brow.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Too eEuch For IIi3A

It is evidently one thing to work
without knowing how much we do and
smother thing to have or labors mapped
ont before us in de;:iL. For several
months a business house i'll this city has
enjoyed the ministrations of an un-
usually faithful colored %janitor. Always
prompt and faithful, unerring in the
discharge of his various duties, Tom
was a great favorite with the firm. and
the prospect was that he would abide
with them many years.
One day it occurred to the senior
partner that a little more system in
Toms routine would be advisable and
perhaps render his work a trife easier,
so he wrote out in plain characters an
outline of the chores Tom had been do
ing every week. arranged perhaps with
more convenience to the firm and to
Tom. Unfortunately Tom could not
read, so the list was given to another
man employed on rougher work, with
instructions to read it to Tom and ex-
plain to him each days prescribed du-
ties.
When the schedule was read to Tom,
however, the effect was astonishing and
disastrous. He listened quietly, but his
eyes grew bigger and his black wool
seemed to bristle on his head. At the
end he reached for his cap and said to
the porter: "Good gracious! lain goin
to do all that work" Then he walked
out and hasn't been seen since.-In+
dianapolis Journal
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Notice of Hearing.

TN THE DISTRICT COURT OF THE
Seventh Judicial District Of the
State Of Montana. in and for the Coun-
ty of Yellowstone.
In the matter Of the estate of Clar-
nee Durbin, deceased. Notice Of time
Of hearing petition for probate of will.
Notice is hereby given that Agnes Y.
Soule has filed with the clerk of this
court a petition praying for the probate
of what purports to be the last will and
testament of Clarence Durbin, deceased,
and that Friday, 18th day of April. A.
d. 1899, at 10 o'clock in the forenoon
of said day, that being a day Of a regu-
lar term of said court, before the judge
of said court, at the court room, at the
court house, in the city of Billings, in
said county and state, has been set as
the time aud place for hearing the said
petition, when and where any person
interested may appear and show cause
why said will should not be admitted
to probate and why said petition should
not be granted.
Dated this 3rd day of April, A. D.
1899. T. A. WILLIAMS,
Clerk of Said Court.
O. F. Goddard,
Attorney for Petitioner. 1913
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
A link

1t will doubtless surprise many who
have never even heard Of the brute that
there still exists on the island of Java
an animal, or rather a reptile, which
seems to be the missing link between
the ichthyosauri of prehistoric days and
the well known saurians of modern
times.
This animal is known to the Javanese
as ''linguin. It fell to the luck of
Baron Alfonso Pereira, consul general
of Austria Hungary. to shoot n of
these beasts some years ago. Its length
was between nine and ten feet, and it
looked a cross between a snake and q
crocodile. Though the beast was cut
and wounded in its encounter with
Baron Pereira it did not bleed.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Study 1t Out.

Here is a highly interesting paradox,
which may amuse or bewilder, as the
case may be. It is supposed to have
been invented by Socrates: A. says that
all Athenians are liars. A. is an Athenian
statement that all Athenians are liars
is not true, and consequently all Athe-
mans tell the truth. A. is an Athenian,
and hence tells the truth. Wherefore
his statement that all Athenians are
liars is true. Therefore he is a liar and
his statement false, and so on.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
What Love L..

Miss Sophie Loury employs an ex.
ceedingly communicative old colored
man to attend to odd jobs about hel
studio now and then, and his sayings
have become proverbial among Miss
Loury's familiars. He came to work
one day not long ago very full of the
goings on of a young man he knew,
who was in love.
"But what is love, uncle?" asked
Miss Loury.
Uncle wagged his head wisely.
"Miss Sophie" he said solemnly,
''love is dizziness. unizziness and in.
attention to business"
And really I don't know of any defni.
ton more concise, complete and alto.
gether adequate than hat.-Washing.
ton POST.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Pennsylvania Sand Mines,

There are all kinds of mines in Penn
%sylvania. The greatest are of course the
iron and coal mines. but few people
would guess that the next extensive
mining industry is the sand mines in
western Pennsylvania. These mines are
rarely underground, however, and many
of them are viewed with wonder by
passengers on the Pennsylvania, ap-
preaching Pittsburg. Whole mountains
are being dug away. and the granular
rocks forming them are being reduced
to sand for the manufacture of glass in
and about P%ittsburg. Philadelphia
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
Force Of Waves.

In a high gale mile long waves, 200
feet from trough to trough and 40 feet
high, roar along the sea at the rate of
30 miles an hour, with a weight Of co.
900 pounds for every foot of their
length.
Upon these a 600 foot ship, such as the
New York or the Paris, will rise like a
floating leaf, but if the ill fated ship
drifts upon a lee shore blows of 1OO,-
600 tons, delivered with remorseless
fury, crush it like an eggshell.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
A wv HOUR BREAKFAST.

1t Il One of h institutions of New
Orleans. L..
There is a place in New Orleans that
strangers are always glad to hav- point
ed out-Begeuy's over in the French
quarter, kept by Nine. Begeuy (pro-
nounced Bigaay, with the accent on the
last syllable), and famous for the break
fasts it serves at II o'clock every morn
ing.
Originally this breakfast was intend
ed for the butchers, and they coEtribut-
ed to it the daintiest meats chat the
splendid French market in New Orleans
provided from day to day. Gradually
outsiders began to come in, and now
one must engage a seat at breakfast two
days ahead. The morning the writer
was there a distinguished judge of the
supreme court was the principal visitor,
and he. with his family and several
guests from Boston. sat at the head of
the table. .
One long table occupies the little
dining room. to which n climbs by a
rickety fight of stairs. Every French
man. when he gets up. takes a cup Of
coffee and a roll. and at II o'clock eats
| his real breakfast. This is the meal that
Nine. Begeuy serves and it costs 81
The kitchen is right off Of the dining
room. and there is nc pretense of adorn-
ment. Everything is as plain and sim
pie as it can be. excepting the food, and
this is the perfection of the g~astronomic
art. A hottie of claret stood at each
place. which. with water imported
from Germany and called ''blue label.
was all there was to drink until the lit
tie II of black coffee finished the re-
past.
The first thing served was duck. It
was excellent. and so was everything
else included in the eight or nine
courses that came on. and that con
cluded, singularly enough. with liver.
so cooked that the only regret was that
the piece was not larger. 1t takes two
hours to eat a breakfast at Begeuy's.
and you get enough to last you for ali
day.-Leslie's Weekly.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
The Omnipresent Rose.

Every continent on the globe, with
the exception of Australia. produces
wild roses. There can be little doubt that
the rose is one of the Oldest flowers in the
world and, perhaps, grown from the
wind blown seeds in Paradise.
In Egypt it is depicted on numbers of
early bas-reliefs. dating from 5000 to
$500 B. c. Rosewater. or the essence of
roses, is mentioned by Homer in the
''1liad," and the flower is spoken of in
the Proverbs of Solomon.
The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-04-07
They Have No Nerves.

A German tourist declares that what
principally distinguishes Cinnamon
from us is their utter freedom from
nervousness. No matter how much they
exert themselves. they always remain
phiegmatic, and they can sleep any
where, in any position and in any
amount Of noise.