The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1899-07-02
BES1E0ED.
BY w. L. ALDEN.

Windsor Magazine.
eyes sir" remarked the Hon Daniel Smith,
formerly of the American consular service "a great
many curious things happen to consul 1 could
tell you experiences of mine that rather calculate
would astonish you some, provided of course that
you willing to believe them For instance. L
stood a threeweeks' siege by thirty-two AmerI-
old maids, and 1 tell you 1 was pretty badly
scared. If you to hear the story I don't mind
telling it to you, though general thing care
full not to speak OF it to my fellow-countrymen.
along in 1886 1 was the American consul at
Aragua town in the south of Spain, about hun
dred miles from the coast. The place didn't need an
American consul any more than needs
bicycle, for it had trade with America. and
American tourist ever dreamed of stopping there.
However, the president personal friend Of
mine, and he wanted to do me a good turn so he
appointed me consul at Aragua, with salary just
about large enough to keep me from starvation. I
was nightly pleased with the appointment until
got to Aragua and found what lonesome dead-and-
alive place it 1t had about thousand nhab-
tants and, with the exception of the chief of police
and two three priests, there wasn't soul in the
whole town that sensible man could talk with for
half hour. The chief of police was a capital fell
low, who had been in New York and could talk con-
siderable English. He and l pretty thick and
he always ready to do anything that L asked
him to do. Then good old Don Diego priest that
had made up his mind to convert to the Roman
Catholic church, did his level best to make himself
agreeable and If it hadn't been that all the
my section of Iowa Protestants, l should have
felt like turning Catholic just to Oblige him. for
got to say that could speak Spanish mddling welk
That the why the president sent to
Spain He said it would be a novelty for consul to
speak the language of the country to which he
sent and he wanted to how the experiment would
work
Zone of the first things that American consul
in Europe finds out is that it swarms with American
tramps Two three times week a ragged. dirty
scoundrel would to my office and demand help
on the ground that he American citizen
Usually he German. Russian, a Polish
Jew who said that he had been naturaIized in Amer
lea and had lost his papers. 1 suppose that ninety
nine times in a hundred the fellow lied and was no
more an American citizen than the king of Spain
himself; but didn't to take the chances that
an impOster and treat him as such. Once did
brace up and tell man who could only speak few
words of English and who said that he had left his
papers in his boarding house. that he a fraud.
He burst into tears and after fumbling at his pocket
produced lot of dirty papers among which
naturalization certificate. signed by the clerk of
New York court who cid friend of mine. 1
begged the mans pardon and lent him So the spot
but year afterwards L a New York paper con-
tanning account of the brutal and outrageous treat
ment that American citizen had received at the
hands of the American consul at Aragua. That
lesson to me; and after that disputed any
mans assertion that he American citizen
knowing that if he really naturalized AInerf-
can he might have friend in congress whe would
denouHce unfit to hold Office and would
either have turned out have my consulate
abolished.
"0f course, couldn't give money to all this army
of tramps. but furnished them with railroad tickets
to the nearest seaport. The chief OF police had
therty to- send all regues and Fagabonds out of the
province. and whenever sent tramp te hRa, with
the request that would give the third-cIass
ticket and send him his Way. the chief would do
1t as a matter of course This would have been all
right had it not been that the American consul at
AEas the seaport to which / sent my tramps grew
indignant and before I had been msnth in Arag.a
wrote to accusing me Of sending him all the
tEaaps Spain and promising to make 1t lively for
If i didn't quit 1t. This made mad and after
tatI tod every tramp Whe to to go straight
to tIetcOnsui at ARas syhe was very rich man and
world he certain tie give hisa money 1t was hard en-
the consul admit, fee he ut the end OF the rail-