The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1899-07-16
LUCK FROM TWISTED VIEW POINT.
Unluclxy johnson Missed Lot of Fun
by Looking CrookedIy.

Unlucky johnson Missed Lot of Fun
by Looking CrookedIy.
From the st. Joseph News
He used to call himself UnluckyJohn-
. son, and declared that everything he
touched was dross. He believed that
he had the worst luck of any man liv-
| ing, and wherever he is now he no
| doubt believes the same.
johnson said he had once been a car
| penter, and that he came near falling
| from the roof of a tall building. He
was at work mailing on the shingles,
he said, when the support below gave
way and he began to slide toward the
edge of the roof.
From the edge of the roof to the
ground the distance was sufficient to
have killed him instantly. Beneath the
spot where he was about to fall was a
pile of rough, jagged rocks, left there
after the foundation had been complet-
ed. He was slipping toward that pile
of rocks and certain death, while the
other workmen watched him in horror,
unable to lift hand to help him.
The doomed man still held in his hand
the Ratchet with which he had been
driving nails into the roof and as he
neared the edge he saw spike lying
there. 1t had rolled down the roof
considerable distance, and, one end be-
ing larger than the other, and, there
fore rolling faster, had turned it
around so that ii stopped before 1t
reached the edge. Johnson seized the
the spike as he passed, and just as he
was going over the edge made one
mighty effort to save his life. With
quick blow johnson drove the large
nail into the roof and held it with the
hand that had gripped 1t when the blow
fell. He hung over the edge of the roof,
but he was saved, and was hauled
back to the roof in safety
@tl hoH CiI
ed himself lucky to escape with his
life under such circumstances, but
johnson said it was the worst luck he
ever had. He complained about 1T
long time and could not see that he
had been favored in the slightest by
Providence.
why he said, 1T was terrible on
my clothes to slide down the roof in
that way. Besides, / hurt my hand
when drove the nail into the roof and
held on to it. If l could have had time
to put on a glove, 1t would not have
been so bad"
Unlucky Johnson invested some
money in a mining scheme, but he
knew at the time. he said, that it would
bring no returns. He drifted along
through life with Indifferent success,
saving money at times and losing 1t
again--all on account of his luck.
Every time Johnson made step for
ward, in a financial way. he slipped
back again about two steps. He even
had trouble with the dog catcher,
which is proof of the worst luck that
man can have in the world. The inn
FOUNDER had him arrested and he paid
a fine
After that Johnson started a shooting
gallery and practlced every day him
self. He said he wanted to be in shape
to get even with the dog catcher. Two
or three unlicensed dogs were kept
about his place all the time as a sort
of inducement for the public impounder
to come around.
AS the dog catcher stayed away from
the place, johnson quit the shooting
gallery and went to travelling for
brewery. That was the only time he
ever had any luck but it did not last
long, of course. His travelling expenses
were too heavy, and he was relieved
of the position at the end of few
months,
A cyclone made a dash at Johnson
once, but missed him about a quarter
of a mile. He was in farm house,
and was not injured in any way, but he
complained more than the farmers
whose property was destroyed He had
to walk nine miles over the devastated
country to get to railroad station,
and that was unlucky.
The next week a tree under which the
unlucky man was standing was struck
by lightning and torn to pieces, but he
was not injured. He was wet thorough
ly by the rain, however, and COM
planned about it. He was on train
that went into the ditch and killed
several passengers, escaping without
bruse He said that was unlucky, be-
cause he could not bring law suit
against the company.
johnson was never sick a day in his
life, but he thinks that was unlucky
because he is unable to appreciate good
health as other people do. He has had
employment all the time when not en-
gagged in business for himself, but lie
cannot see anything resembling good
luck in that, he thinks it Is unfortunate
that he should be compelled to work
After a good many years the money
johnson had invested in mine mada
him a handsome fortune. 1t is, per-
haps the only case of the kind on rec
ord, but he said it ought to have made
him twice as much. Then an old uncle
died and left him more money, and he
complained because it was not twice
as much. He quit work and began 20
enjoy life as other rich men do, but has
never ceased to believe himself I'M
lucky.