The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-06-10

ten, so that a man who drinks a gill will
be as hilarieusly happy, as maudlin and
incapable as he used to be when he
drank d cask.
DR.. Corning found by experiments that
men who work in caissons under COM
pressed air are peculiarly susceptible to
the effects of rum. A man who takes
perhaps one cocktail and then climbs in
to a caisson where the air is at about 80
pounds to the square inch finds himself
intoxicated, thus cheating the saloon
keepers out Of The price of many drinks.
The physician who discovered all this
at his laboratory thinks it is entirely
feasible to build compressed air parlors
in every saloon. Here are the advan-
tages of such an innovation as explained
by a well known drinking man.
1.-The great beauty of the thing" said
he, lis it's Observation-Disclosures There
may not be any such word in the dietion-
AIRY, but it describes the situation.
"a man with a desire to get a com
pressed air jag takes n drink and en-
tiers the tank. At once he is very drunk,
a condition he has reached without any
great tax upon either his stomach or his
purse.
While in the tank he can sing and
dance and tell funny stories and say all
the idiotic things that drunken men make
a speciality of saying. He can talk about
himself, denounce his enemies, tell his
grievances, give vent to his bottled up
patriotism and have a glorious time gen.
orally.
But the beauty of the air tank comes
in when he wants to sober up. All he
49, - j. =. - o1.4 aa~, A. %,,l~
and he is sober at once; pay his modest
check for one drink and go about his
business.
None of the time spent in SOLDERING up
will be wasted when the air tanks are
inserted in our saloons. They can be
made as large as you like, with electric
lights, choice reading matter and a free
lunch. 1t wont be necessary for the
waiter to enter the tank to serve drinks,
for the client takes only one, and that on
going in himself.
mo doubt, the tank idea will be OPP
posed by the distillers, but just as soon
as one saloon builds one all the rest will
ave to follow suit. 1t will be a glorious
day for the American wife when every
drinking place has one.
"Why? Because it will abolish drunk
enness. All the intoxication there will be
occurs in the tanks. No man will ever go
home inebriated to bore his wretched
better half with his long dissertations on
his own abilities, on his talents so great
ly underestimated by the %populaee, with
his persecution mania or the silly anec-
dotes which, when unsober, he imagines
are funny.
'"The first tank should be built by pub
lie spirited wives. A small admissionsfee
might be charged to provide for interest
on the bonds, but the drinking man
could well afford the fee, even if it were
a dollar, as the tank would save him so
many expenditures.
SIN the big building operations down
town, caissons are used to exclude water
and quicksand. The contractors have
only slight accommodations to offer to
transient guests, as the men sitting
around tables in caissons interfere with
the building operations.
you cannot blame the contractors for
not admitting those who wish to expert
ment, for they really haven't the room.
They are forced to guard their own inter-
eSts.
Compressed air is very much more
healthy than rum and considerably cheap
er. 1t cannot be cornered or hogged by
a trust as whisky cam"
DIR. Corning admits his discovery, but
refuses to iIdorse its application to sa.
looms. He says he made it purely for
scientific, not for bibulous. purposes.