The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1899-08-12
GEORGES PA
Attempts TO Explain What is Wrong
With Mr.. Aston.

With Mr.. Astor.
Chicago Times Herald: Say Paw"
That's what nav said when paw was
! carven the roast lam last mite.
Whats rong7" paw asst.
II wIsht you'd tell me what's all this
fuse about Aston. What made him sc
and Kit to be NinglIshman"
"Causs he'd ruther Be over there
where he kin sneak up and peek thru
the not Holes in the Fence around
Queen YIctory's Cassel than run a Ho-
tel in New York." paw says, glvin thu
carven nIfe q extry jab and maxim
greese fly all over the Table cloth.
"And who's ngoin to Run the Hotel
while he's away?' NAV asst.
"oh, dunno. guess he gifts the Bar
! tender to come In and Look after
things" paw says.
my goodness" nav told Him. do
they Have a Saloon In Stitch fine place
as that"
well" paw ansered, II dunno as you
| OF TO Say It That way. They generally
Have tho Saloon and then Bid tho
Hotel around It. But Aston he has
mummy Besides. He Don't need to De-
pend on what they take in fer
Drinks'
How did he make his other munnyF'
NAV asst,
what Saved up paw told her. his
father Had more mummy than a OK TEEN
Could pull, Becos the He'd OF the Fam
fly. Bot Hides fer Llvin."
ttNH,t ,,,ort aoyH UId TINT aO9
Why ! always Herd the Astors was
awful Big nrlstocrats."
well, they are" paw Told Her.
''Thay Don't Hnft to rent their house
and they keep two Gurls and take ice
all winter and send their washin out"
"And VT there nnsester Bot Hides"
NAV Sed as IL she couldn't Hardly Be-
leeve It.
"Yes," paw unsered. "Bht you otten't
to Blame Him. II he would Of knowed
that Some of His Arlstocrhtlck Dlssen-
dents WINS aEoin to BE ashamed Of II I
Bet you He woulden't Of Done II. In
stead OF Coin around the Country as
tin the folks II TINY had bin KILN en-
ny calls Laitly and glttln the skins fer
two SentB n Pound less than they ast
He would Of probably wrote poetry or
kept n grocery and Bin proud and Re
served. He Wouldn't Of got much
mummy that why. But he could Of
kept sayin TO Himself when things
wasen't Comm his way In professions:
"'Never mind ole man, you're aGoin
to have uristocrRtIck dlssendents Some
day and Then they won't Have no
Cause to Blush fer Shaime when they
are out BLOWN the folks OF to n Good
Time with the Durty dollars you Saw
ed up
Every man what's pllln up welth to
Day OF to Think about this. You never
can tell who's nnsester you mite Hap
pen TO DO. They are only one trubble
about worklng-man startin out to Be
ariHtocrntlck nnHester. II he duE TINT
He cant leave nothin fer His dlssen-
dents 10 BE nrlstOcratick With"
But. paw" may says y Red Some
place that the Astors Claim they
Come from n proud old Hugonot fam-
Yves, no they Claim they Do paw
Sed. but hats list Josh sumbuddy
probly Give them when Hc wanted to
borrow mummy or GIT Mites lodgin for
nnwthln at the Hotel ThGy Amt no
more HugonOt IN thG AstorR than they
are In our pupp. Them kind Of pretcn-
thuna makes me Ian. II would Of Bin
HuRnnnt and thot ! would Ever Be-
cum the Ancestor Of slch purson on
account Of II I would Of quit rite thnre.
/ would Of SEED to miseli
Willie. II In fur, fur Better not to
be u HugonOt than Have dIBsendents
what mite Bring the Blush OF Shame to
your falls"
well, paw" NAV Asst when she could
git the Chanel, what Is a Hugonot,
emmy way?"
Paw he looked ut Her kind Of Scared
for q seukond and then He Set Back