davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
MODERN PROVERBS.

A mans best capital Is his Industry
If he can sell 1t.
A society woman Is one who has
learned to smile ike politician.
Friends are those people who act
surprised when we tell them how old
we are.
A girl never gets over the shock of
encountcring a man who proposes but
once.
Every woman thinks she can make
better coffee than my other woman
she knows.
When n widow remembers how
much sugar bachelor takes In his
tea he had better look out.
Some women put money In the bank
Just TO have that important feeling
when she draws It out.
Being admired by the wrong man al
ways makes woman mad at him 70,
not being the other one.
A woman selects husband by her.
self, but she takes three other women
with her to help her pick out hat
Exchange
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
CONNECTICUT HOTEL RULES.


The following set of rules and gen.
eral notices Is posted In n hotel In a
small Connecticut town:
RULES For HOTEL GUESTS.
Board $50 per week-menls extra.
Breakfast at five, dinner at six. sup
per at seven.
Guests are requested not to speak TO
the dumb waiter
Guests wishing TO get up without be.
ing called can have self-rsing -four for
supper.
The hotel Is surrounded by Il beautI.
ful cemetery. IIearsea 10 hire, %
cents day,
Guests wishing TO do little driving
Will find II hammer and nails In the
closct.
lf the room gets too warm open the
windows and see the fire escape.
If you are fond Of athletics and like
good jumping, lift the mattress and
see the bed spring.
If your lamp goes out take IA feather
out OF the pillow; that's light enough
for any room.
Any one troubled with night mare
viii find halter on the bed post.
Don't worry about paying your bin,
the house Is supported by founda.
ton.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
PORTO RICO

Lemons unknown.
No color line is drawn.
Horses and people are small
Guava Jelly the only desert.
All meals served In courses
People do not shake hands.
No wheat Is raised.
Department store Is unknown.
Rum IL the national drink.
women DO mol wear hats
Babies and children wear 10 clothes
PIneapples and cocoanuts abundant
Little children and old women smoke
cigars.
Sugar manufacture the principal In
dustry.
No milk wagons. Cows are driven
from door 10 door
Only one protestant church on the
island.
Urban transportation for passengers
hN harouchc only.
Bl1lsS and other business houses
open on Sunday.
Metric system used In weights and
measures
Poorer classes have no chimneys In
houses.
only one quarter of the population
can read and write
Oxen are yoked around the horns In.
stead of the neck
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
he MADE A DISCOVERY.
An Instance Where a Superabundance o
Knowledge Was Disastrous.

Ah iustanco mere n buporaDundance o
knowledge Was Disastrous.
81 hear good deal about luck" sale
the oculist as he polished away at
pair of eyeglasses and smiled in sor
rowful way, but don't believe in it
The man who has luck Is the man VIII,
don't make Il fool Of himself, as | die
year or two ago. II Id had tvs
grains of sense in my head on an occa
sion twenty months ago I'd have beer
enjoying soft snap to-day.
mo ii wasn't n ground floor specu
latlon," he continued, after breathing
on the glasses and holding them up Il
the light Il got n letter from til,
President of one of the biggest rail
roads In the country, asking me TO cal
at his office. When l called | diseov
cred that he wanted to pay me $4,000
per year to test the employees of the
road for color blindness. | closed Will
the offer rs quick rs | could get my
breath, and n day was named for mt
10 bring up my samples and show tho
old gent the modus operandi of the
thing. | was ON hand when the hour
arrived. had all the colors ever used
about n railroad. ana after looking
them over the President sagaciously
observed.
"'This green doesn't seem to me to
be quite as deep as our signals, but
perhaps 1t will answer well enough
Il turned 10 him, and | hope to drop
dead in my tracks If he wasn't looking
at the brightest kind of red-thc dan
ger signal, you know!
You mean this,' | said as pointed
to the deep green.
No, sir | mean this he replied, as
he put his finger on the red
"Ah, me-" sighed the oculist, but
what n fool | made of myself! The
President of that big railroad couldn't
tell red from green, nor blue from
white, and | was ass enough to give
II away TINT lie was eolor-blind. Ii
was only between us two, but he flew
mad and called me an impostor anG
an idiot, and | was virtually kicked
out of his Office"
"You ought have lied about it, wa.
remarked.
Il ought 10 have kept my mouth
shut and never said word. 1t was
nothing TO me whether he could tel
the color OF his hat or not, but II was
a heap TO him to learn that he'd beer
married for thirty years and didn't
know whether his wife had black
hair or red
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26

worthy of the name. who did not aspire
to be the father and the grandfather OF
healthy, capable children to hand down
his name and the fortune accumulated by
the sweat of his brow, from generation to
generation. There never was wife ft TO
bear that noble title, who did not wish to
wear womanhood's most glorious crown,
the sceptre of motherhood. Thousands
of welded couples, otherwise happy, fall
short of wedlock's greatest happiness be-
cause they are childless. In the majority
of cases, this Is because the wife, through
ignorance or neglect suffers from weak
ness and disease of the organs distinctly
feminine. For women who suffer III this
way there Is one great medicine that does
not fail to accomplish its purpose. II IA
DR. Pierceis Favorite Prescription. II acts
directly OH the delicate organs concerned
and makes them strong, healthy, vigorous,
vifile and elastic. 1t allayS Inflammation,
heals liberation. soothes pain and tones
the shattered nerves. II fits for witehood
and motherhood. 1t quickens and vitalizes
the distinctly feminine organism 1t BAN
ishes the maladies of the expectant months
and makes baby IS introduction to the world
easy and almost painless. II insureS the
little newcomers health and nourishment
in plenty, 1t is the best supportive tome
for nursing mothers.
Mrs Jennie Parks, of Marshall spokane Co.
wash writes. a. am glad TO tell OF the good
results of your great medicine, Dr. rierces
Eavorite Prescription. was benehteu oy yoh You
medicine in confinement II gives me st's s. g,l,
picture of health. l feel better than hiVe a.
ten years,
In cases of constipation Dr. Pierce's
Pleasant Pellets should be used as an
adjunct TO the " Favorite Prescription,
they are extremely simple, perfectly natural
aud insure prompt and permanent feueL
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
Chlnn,. First KniiMny.

The first railroad constructed in
China was Il narrowgauge line from
Shanghai to Woosung. put down in
1876, and intended chiefly as an ocular
demonstration 10 the Chinese. AT the
end OF twelve months II was sold to
Chinese official. who straightway tore
up the rails and deported them to For
mosa. The single dummy engine of
the line now reposes peacefully In the
mud OF some Formosan harbor, to-
getber with the wreck of the junk In
which IL was transported During
these twelve months OF It's existence
the Shanghai-Woosung railroad, with
It's single dummy engine and its train
OF small cars, which. hy the way, were
of the American pattern, carried 300,-
900 passengers. The Chinese came
from far and wide TO goa and experi-
ment with this new barbarian cufio&-
ity, and the people in the neighbor-
hood, soon finding IL an institution OF
great practical utility, became regular
patrons. The predicted uprising of the
people against the construction of the
road never materialiZed, and, as for
the graves along the route, every farm
er would manufacture as many graves
as he could get dollars for permission
TO traverse them
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
Tho noys Wore Accommodating.

Princeton professor, being troubled
by hardness at the morning lecture.
on the part OF some of the students,
advised them, when they complained
that they had to study so hard at night
that they could not arise early. to get
alarm clocks, The next day nearly
every student In the class came into
recitation with an alarm clock In his
pocket, which by patient and united
efforts were set so that one would go
OFF promptly at every successive min
ute OF the hour. The effect can be-
imagined. Shortly after the first stu
dent was called to reete one OF the
clocks In the pocket OF boy at the
other end of the room went off with
terrible clamor, and before 1t had fin
ished II second In another part of the
COON made even a louder racket.
There was a brief interval which the
professor utilized TO call up another
student, but the latter was scarcely on
his feet before the third clock went
OFF The performance was continued
for half an hour or more, when the
professor, who had a keen sense of
humor, recognized the situation and
cut short the fun by terminating the
recitation.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26

In southern family lives an old
man named JEFF, who has been with
them and the previous generation for
more years than they can remember.
He Is certainly pretty old himself, so
his mistress was rather surprised when
he asked to have Q few days of to go.
as he put II, up to de old state OF New
Haven" to gee his aunt
why, JEFF" said the lady. your
aunt must be pretty old, isn't she?"
"Yes'm,' he replied; "yes'm; my
aunt must be pretty ole now she's
about 105 years old now
"A hundred and five years." excaim-
ed the lady Why, what on earth is
she doing up there In New Haven"
Deed, | don't know what she's do
IN, ma'am." rejoined JEFF. In all ser.
iousness. Shea up dere Twin Wild her
grandmother"
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
HAND IN HAND.

Before our pathways met, dear.
True JOY we did not know;
Now we have no regret, dear,
As hand In hand we go
The glad stars Of the night, dear.
Smile With a softer glow,
And day with hope is bright, dear.
As hand in hand we 60
When youth at last departs. dear,
And cold the breeZes blow,
Loves clasp will warm our hearts,
dear,
AS hand In hand we go.
Washington Star.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26

CrImsonbeak: MY wife Is very sys'
tematlc,"
Yeast: You don't say
yes when she wants me 10 remem.
Der 10 bring home sugar, what do you
think she doesY'
puts a string about your finger"
String, nothing, What's n string
got TO do with sugar? She ties piece
of sandpaper ON my hat"
Good
"And when she wants butter, what
do you suppose she does"
Couldn't guess"
"Why she ties lock of hair about
ny finger. -Yonliers Statesman.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
A ala Ono

Didn't you know IL was against the
law TO beg for money! said the lady
TO the tramp at the back door,
II wasn't going TO beg for money
ma'am." was the reply of the humble
wanderer.
ITS just as bad TO beg for bread.
Il wasn't going to beg for bread
ma'am"
What are you going 10 beg for, thcr
prayT
Only for one OF your pictures
ma'am. "-Yonkers Statesman,
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
A PERFECT NEWSPAPER

To publish ALL THE NEWS promptly and
succinctly and in the most readable form,
without elision or partisan bias; to discuss
its significance with frankness, TO keep AN
OPEN EYE FOR pubic ABUSES, to
give besides complete record of current
thought, fancies and discoveries in all de-
partments of human activity in its DAILY
EDITIONS of from 10 to IA PAGES, and to
provide the whole for its patrons at the
nominal price of ONE CENT-that was
from the outset, and will continue ia be
the aim Of THE RECORD
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
At thn FDot

~ hope they don't give my little hoy
any naughty nicknames In sohoolT
"Yea, ma, they call me 'Corns'
Glow dreadful. And why do they
call you thatT'
"Cause In our class, you know, I'm
always al the foot Detroit Free
Press
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26

Mr.. crimsonbeak: There's terrible
smell OF boiling cabbage throughout
the house"
Mrs: Crimsonbeak: Yes; were boil.
ing the lace curtains. In the hope of
getting the tobacco smell out OF them. +"
-Yonkers Statesman
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26

The Amen !
of marriage is
always a baby.
w 18th out it,
wedtock is a
summer field
I hat ne v er
b loo III 8, n
n wcr h at
never buds, a
night without
stars, a sermon
without q OCH
e diction, a
prayer without
an Amen.
There never
was a husband
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26

Wlne-testers eat a small piece OF
bread with scrap OF cheese. between
samples. to insure an nnpreiudiced
taste
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
TYPEWRITER!

Allstandard makes, bought, sold exchanged,
rented, repaired. All guaranteed and sent on
approval Send for illustrated circulars.
CONSOLIDATED TYPEWRITER EX-
CHANGE, 24G broadway, N. Y.
March 1909
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
The
Philadelphia
Record

after career of nearly twenty years OF
uninterrupted growth is justified in claim
ing that the standard first established by
Us fnnnders Is tho one true iest of
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1899-04-26
A
QingIe
Otandarsl

only is possible, whether as a test of excel
lence in journalism, or for the measurement
of quantities time or values and
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16

Taking an average of the prices
charged in these four cities, it will be
found that the rates of the other three
cities are more than fifty per cent.
above those charged in Bellefontaine.
With better water, better supply,
much cheaper rates, works more than
paying all expenses, including interest
on bonds, (if we give the works credit
for half what is paid companies for fire
protection in other cities,) and grow
ing income, and the people furnished
water free for their schools, fountains
and water troughs, and with water
mains more widely extended to supply
all parts of the city, why should any one
think for moment, that city owner
ship is not blessing-and not better
than private ownership?
No one who understands the question
will for moment advocate a change to
private ownership.
Our Board of Trustees are working
faithfully to meet all wants of the peo-
pie, to give the best service at the least
expense, and the city should give them
their hearty appreciation and encour-
agement-as that is all they get in the
way of pay.
| The Board and officers for the present
year, are, A. E. Griffin, President, A.
Wissler, r. B. Keller; G. F. Martin,
Secretary and Superintendent.
| Mr.. Martin is a faithful and compe
tent officer, and ably seconds the Board
in It's efforts toward economy and eff
cheney of service.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
GAS EXPLOSION.
Fortunate Escape from Serious DAM
age in Peoples Block.

While the Comandery of the Knights
of the Golden Eagle were drilling in
their hall, in the third story of the
Peoples Block, Tuesday evening, they
detected the odor of smoke, and
traced it to an anteroom. Opening the
door, they found it full of smoke. and
flame, but having water convenient
soon extinguished the fire. The gas
from leak in the meter in the room
had caught fire, and made an explO-
sion that wrecked the meter, and set
fire to the room. The paper had been
burned on'the wall, and hole burned
in the floor, and the connection with
the meter melted off. The flash of the
explosion was seen on the street.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
THE LATEST NEWS!

The Filipinos have evacuated linus
and retreated to Binang, south OF
Laguna de Bay, taking 100 wounded
with them.
The Chicago Journal calls on the
Administration to send Gen. Miles to
the Philippines to take command OF
our forces.
The defeat of the insurgents at
Zapote was worse than at first supposed
and Gen. Lawton thinks they are driv.
en- entirely out of Cavite province.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
THE SCHOOLS.
THE BOARD ELECTS NEW TEACH
ERS, REDlSTRICTS THE CITY
FOR SCHOOL PURPOSES,
And Assigns the Teachers to the
Several Buildings.

The School Board met Wednesday
night, and disposed of considerable inn
porant business.
Mary Vanmeter, Nellie Huston, and
Mary McIlhenny were elected addition
al teachers. Miss Vanmeter is a grad
uate of our schools, Miss Huston is from
DeGraff, and Miss McIlhenny is from
the neighborhood of Ridgeway. All
come with excellent recommendations.
The erection of another building has
caused reassignment of teachers for
the ensuing year, which is as follows:
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
BOOKS WANTED.

Any person who has any knowledge
of any books of record of the first Pres
byterian church or Sabbath School Or
of any of it's societies, will confer a
favor by notifying Mr.. G. w. Bartholo-
new, Mrs. Libbie Armor or j. Q. A.
Campbell.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
FIRE.

The house of Henry Tells, near the
cemetery, was burned about 800 O'Clock
this morning.
The family did not discover the fire
until the roof was falling in, and they
got nothing out but washstand. No
alarm was given to the Department.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
SENTENCED FOR LIFE.

Paul Zeltner, tried at Bowling Green
for the murder of Attorney Weston
haver, was found guilty of murder in
the first degree, but recommended for
mercy. The Judge sentenced him to
the penitentiary for life, without a
chance of pardon. His brother John
will now be tried.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
TERRIFIC STORM.
The Town of New Richmond, Wis
COnsin, in Ruins and I2O
People Killed.

The village of New Richmond, in
Northwestern Wisconsin, some forty
miles east of ST. Paul, was struck by a
tornado, Tuesday evening, about six
o'clock, and the better portion of it laid
in ruins. The latest dispatches show
that 120 persons were killed, and IL
injured. There are still IS persons
missing, who may have gone to the
homes of friends in other places. The
storm was terrific and disastrous, bu
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16

Major Kaufman having served ten
years in the National Guard, has been
retired according to the statute with
the honorary grade of Major, and is
entitled to wear the uniform of that
rank on all public occasions. The
Major has been faithful and efficient
officer, and has won his honors by good
service.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
PERSONAL NOTES.

Mr.. Jay Shriver of Chicago, is in tn,
city.
Mr.. Paul Defrees was in Sidney, yes
terday.
DR.. J. H. Wilson went to Cleveland
yesterday.
Mr.. and Mrs. Presley Shaw went t,
Lima, yesterday.
Miss Mabel Cushman went to Spring
field, Wednesday.
Mrs. F. r. Mclaughlin is visiting
friends in Austin, Ills.
Mrs. John Herman and children visit
ed friends in Dayton, this week.
Miss Florence Roebuck is visiting
her aunt at Worthington, Ohio.
Miss Mary Sweet of Columbus, visit
ed friends in this city, yesterday.
Rev. G. Conway and sister visited
friends in Springfield, Wednesday.
DR.. Simon Morgenroth is visiting his
uncle, Abe Morgenroth, in Muncie.
Mrs. Robert Boyd, of Kansas City
visited friends in this city yesterday,
Miss Amanda Hamilton is spending
her vacation with her sister in Lima.
Mrs. J. M. Hamilton will GO to Mack
inac next week. Miss Mabel will joir
her.
Prof. Henry Whitworth and son Ker
nan are visiting in Beaver, Pennsyl
vania.
Messrs. Homer and Myron Lesourt
went to Piqua, Tuesday, on theil
bikes.
Mr.. and Mrs. S. K. Nogle, of Kenton
are the guests of Mr.. and Mrs. E. L
Sears.
Miss Mabel Hamilton and Master
Fred are visiting DR.. George Kalb il
Erie Pa.
Mrs. Rob Boyd, of Kansas City, Mo.
was the guest of Miss Name Scarf
Thursday.
Miss Grace Short and Mr.. Leistel
JoHantgen are expected home toda.
from London.
Auditor Campbell, wife and two sons
Quincy and Alfred, returned from
Lima, Tuesday.
Mrs. Davis and daughter Helen have
returned from visit to her parents, a.
Lexington, Ohio.
Mrs. Jane Defrees went to Sidney
yesterday on account of the serious
illness of relative.
Miss Carrie Butler and her nephew
Horace Butler, left yesterday to visi
friends in Franklin, Ohio.
Mrs. E. J. Hahn, Mrs. J. G. Brown
and Miss Anna Barthauer visited the
Children's Home, Tuesday.
Mrs. Kizzie Moore, of Kenton, visited
the family of Mr.. Charles Mclaughlin
on East Chillicothe, this week.
Mrs. S. M. Thompson and Mrs. Mil
roy and daughter, are home from {
visit with friends in Columbus.
Mrs. A. A. Aull, of Chattanooga, wht
has been the guest of her daughter
Mrs. Vance Wellman, left for home
yesterday.
Miss Kizzie Moore, who has been the
guest of Mr.. Charles McLaughlin'1
family, returned to Kenton Wednes
day evening.
DIR. Chas. E. Miller, of Muncie, wa
the guest of his parents near the city
the first of the week. The DR.. ha
many friends here.
Mrs. Estelle Campbell, Mrs. SUI
Thrift aud Roxy Gearing will go t.
Youngstown, Monday, to attend tn
State Convention of w. r. C.
Mrs. H. G. Moore, of East Columbu
avenue, has had the pleasure of visi
this week from her two sisters, Mrs
Huling and Mrs. Deardorf, of Urbana.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
CANDY KITCHEN.

Only one candy kitchen in our city
and this is owned by the Greek-Ameri-
can, on Columbus Avenue. You will
find there every kind of candy, and it
is all fresh and good. The best ice
cream in the city too, and only 25 cts.
per quart. Pure cream, and first-class
goods cannot be made cheaper.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
TO COLORADO.

From June rs until July IL, inclusive,
the D. & L. N. will sell excursion tick
cts to Denver, Colorado Springs, Pueblo
and Glenwood Springs, Colorado, al
very low rates. These tickets will be
good returning to October 81, inclusive
For further information call upon OF
address, w. M. SEGAR, Agent,
If 7sA Bellefontaine, Ohio
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16

James A. Coulter, of Huntsville, has
been granted reissue and increase of
pension from $500 to $500 from July
%, 1896, and $40 from May 10, 1899.
Joseph Kaylor, of Washington town.
ship, has been granted an original
pension from January 9, 1899. Both
through Thos. H. Wright's attorney
ship.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16

1t is reported that last Sundays
revelries were worse at the Reservoir
than anything before. A woman was
struck blow on the neck by a man
and felled senseless to the earth.
Respectable people should be ashamed
to be seen there on Sundays.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16
THE NEW DEPOT.

The D. & L. N. now occupies its new
depot on West Buckingham street.
Conductor Segar has moved his Office
to the new depot. Frank Arnold will
act as operator, and Lee Traul as bag
gage master.
The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-06-16

The observance of Knights of Pyth-
las decoration day, was attended this
year, with unusual interest at Belle
fontaine. Mr.. A. Jay Miller made the
address at the hall, and the procession
to the cemetery was headed by the De
Graf band.