The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-05-21
AT HIS OLD BOYHOOD HOME
FACTS ABOUT A COMMON LONGING As
VIEWED By EX-TANK Nc. 10.

Three Attempts to Get There-One Landed
Hin on the Pacific Coast and the Other
In Kansas City His InKloriouS Arrival and
triumphant Exit by Means of n Medal.
Which I think may say. without fear OF a
call-down. that this thing OF going back to your
old boyhood home is n pretty hard one to put
over the plate. and it's usually n frost at that
when you do finally get there remarked Ex-
Tank No. 10 Of the Harlem Club OF Former
Alcoholic Degenerates after the ceremonies at
tending tho initiation Of three new members
had been completed at the last meeting. Il
suppose there isn't a fellow here who hasn't
had a bunch to go back to the old place and
have a look around at
Wait q minute" interrupted No. 7. the par
Humanitarian and kicker. Il want to ask the
Chief Ex-Tank II he doesn't think there's been
a whole lot too much sentimental gush at these
experience meetings lately. At me old boy
hood home down on the farm. or In the dell. or
out In the woods. or on the water front. or In q
blooming cave. for that matter. who wants to
listen to a lot O. slush like thatP submit that
it sounds too much like beery ballads from the
go-off. What's Fifteen's boyhood home got to
do with rum Where does red-eye break into
a mans bunch to sneak back to his old boy
hood home and
NO. Seven is fined n round dozen vichy and
lin " llttt HOslnk uIItdSOhuulo ODJec-
tions," said the Chief Ex-Tank, peremptorily.
Alcoholism is inseparably mixed with any
mans desire to return to his old boyhood
home. This is obvious. No mar not In an
alcoholic state would he Jay enough to think
OF going back to the home OF his boyhood.
I've wanted to go back to my old boyhood
homo myself. and I know all about that soggy
desire. Fifteen will continue"
You see." resumed Ex-Tark No. IS. II
hadn't got within more than hitting distance
OF the old town since I left IL when I was a
twelve-year-old kid. and I wanted to see it. 1t
got so that every time / corned up / just longed
to get on a train and ride to the middle Of the
country. where the towns located. and look It
over. Fact Is. I started for the place on three
different occasions. Once I shot over the mark.
owing to the fact that I went to sleop for three
days on tho train. and I landed on the Pacific
coast. I didn't land there right. either. and
1t was up to me to get right back
here to my base on this seaboard. Sold Chinese
canary birds on commission on the San Fran
cisco streets and from house to house to get
the price OF the ride back. I got acquainted
with a lot Of the hands working on the China
steamers. Every time they made San Fran
cisco on their return from China they brought
back big punches Of these ~canaries In little
wooden cages. They let me have 'em for 81
teight bits. they call it out therel apiece. and 1
conned people into buying 'em for from 50 to
81 each. I had enough to get back here with
bells on inside Of a couple OF months.
Next time l started out for my old boyhood
home l woke up In a Turkish bath in Kansas
City. ordered five drinks right away. and found
when I started to dress that I was shy on the
price OF them. Didn't have a nick. Came near
being handed over 10 the cops for ordering
booze that I couldn't pay for. Didn't see much
chance to get out of Kansas City until 1t o.
Cured to me that the Fourth OF July was only
three days off. So I rented a little vacant store
on my face. got a cargo of fireworks on tick
from a big wholesale house and went into
business. II was something easy. I sold out
three times before Fourth Of July night and
Il wasn't sogged enough to feel like keep
home then. and so ], called myseifin.' The very
next time | went skating here the boyhood
wanted e hear the III Trumpet calls e %S Gas' from
home. i wanted to see the little old Church,
Wanted to size up the river where learned
Of Wheat AND iinha diettiha the C cool Ole evening Hsi fraSr neles
Beery thinks" Erowled No. Z under his
Wanted to land there with gig lamps on
nn p Win d9nGh IN every pocket; and show the
was 70 ft''S years. ears u old what t they ayf nyis Ms VIZ" ft's a ,
Queer old bug. tho boyhood home bug is. and
every line roy hear flute music and you're
third time and made it. Say. you Si'S can lD' talk ak
S Wssn't in yo SHAPE 'sse enjog my oia bo ShtoS9 home
s %o! Pp9dG Of IN nU Ghlsa e inc eoan 1se Itttay when
Abbey to. me when / was a iid"in my
l S2SA0G red. h0T That / k mes al ali Gpf'' my TO p the
Dreams OF landing at the odd place
where learned what I know OF fractions. but
around and watch the Kids among whom l was
raised shaving at their trades. and then. when
work and go carriage riding with me. It had
been my original idea. or one Of 'em. in coming
e NIX old 6Gyhood HON 10 ed e dig up the old
wine for q few days. Likewise. i'd intended
ranged to give my old b Si home me ap blow %g-
sorry that they hadn't pulled away from there
and hadn't become somebody. "'A u'u
- got a JOB that afternoon as a waiter in the
sISss, fHs d &SShS"S Eno WIN ne: We 9. S eoqrs ssn, md i
S SlaP Soy Ts@s fhH oBs ine 70 naSn ny ny i / Mss | IN h mS
that l had made q hash OF my arrival at my old
boyhood home, but I wasn't going to complete
the Job by putting anybody next to who | was.
! lust took that tray-juggling job for eight q
three weeks I'd have the price OF a ride back to
Chicago or anywhere outside Of my old boy
hood home. and that kept me up.
when Sunday came around l thought Pd
look around. anyhow. Went to the church
where I'd been an acolyte when a kid. Took q
rear seat and watched the bunch coming in,
Recognized a lot Of the people; The little girl
named. Kittie O'Hoolihan. who had spurned my
offer Of marriage when we were both 10 years
Of age. was one q the early, arrivals. She
girls. all looking the same age. along with
looked Just like she looked at their time OF
life. The little girls that I'd haughtily
refused to have anything to do with when
l was a youngster because they weren't
pretty enough to suit my. juvenile ideas OF
beauty had changed to handsome women. and
the girls who had ~bewltohed me with their
frocks seemed TO have all switched to homeli-
ness; The young fellows who I'd figured out
would probably be working as iron moulders or
paper-bo factory hands. pranced down tho
middle aisle. done UP to tho limit. with the
swell girls, and those who ! thought would be
about stake class by the time ] visited my old
boyhood home. were side-aisle plugs who
looked like brlckyard hands. The church,
that I'd been figuring on HS little short ~