Evening star., 1899-03-25
Mr.. JoBsoN's REVENGE

Mr.. Jobson got home from his Office a
4:l5 one afternoon last week and found
note from Mrs. Jobson saying that she hat
gone to hear the performance of long
haired pianist, and that he'd find his din
ner all ready for the girl to serve it.
fhats a good thing, too" mused Mr.
Jooson sulkfly, when he had read the note
II wonder these mattress-headed gen.
fuses that come over here to this country
ana rake In American dollars, hating Amer
leans all the time, wouldn't call their game
al an hour that 'ud permit toihng mans
wife to be on hand at home to give him
something to eat when he wants it." etc.
etc.
Inc opportunity was too good for MIR
Jobson to miss, so he declined to eat any
dnner when the servant put it on the
table. Instead, he slammed on his hat and
went down town. He wanted to give Mrs
JoDsoH lesson. He ate an unsatisfactory
dinner at restaurant, and then poked
around until 1t was time for variety thea
Ter 10 open It's doors. He had to watch a
lot OF poorly-played billiard games in order
70 put IN this time, and to talk with lot
OF bachelors from whose WAYS of thinking
ne had departed. He was bored exceeding
~ by theater time. The show bored him
still more. But he stuck it out, for he
wanted to get home as late as possible. the
better to rub it In on Mrs Jobson BY II
O'Clock he reflected that he had had pretty
poor sort of an evening-his evening paper
unread, his favorite pipe neglected for a
iot OF cigars that gave him heartburn, a
poor dlnner idle talk with slew of men
that he didn't want to talk to. and. finally.
taWdry, cheap variety performance that
might have got a laugh out of him ten
years before. but was only so much ribal-
dry to him now He took in a couple more
billiard games, however, after the show.
and threw couple of cocktails into him
Seif. not because he cared to drink but
because ne wanted Mrs Jobson to smell his
breath and thus perceive the awful conse-
quences of her conduct
MIS-. Jopson was comfortably tucked In
Ded When Mr.. Jobson got home about half
an hour after midnight She had not even
ieft iight burning in the vestibule or In
tne oeo room. She woke up very leisurely
Wnen MI. Jobson started one of the gas
Jets going. She didn't say anything how
ever: Mr. Jobson had expected to find her
up, tuliy dressed and in tears. He was dis
appointed He was more disappointed that
she didn't greet him with repnings Mr..
3obSon saw that she was likely to go to
sleep again, and that he wasn't causing
any sref at all by being naughty and
said:
Did he play the Buck Dance Concerto
IN ~. MINOR with his hair, and how was h?"
Ihere was lot of sarcasm In the way
Mr.. Jobson asked this question.
Mrs. Jobson didn't turn over at all.
What are you talking about?" she in
quired, sleepiy.
Il want to know If that Dutchman that
Kept you away from your duty of serving
meal to your husband after his day of
grinding labor, gave you your moneys
worth; also. if you think you're making
any kind of hit with anybody by these
methods, hey?"
"Oh, the recital-thats what you're
speaking of, isn't it?" said Mrs. Jobson,
sweetly. ''Well, 1 didn't CO. / had intend
ed to go when 1 started out shopping in
the morning, and left the note for you tell
ing you so. but I thought it might annoy
you to have me away from dinner, and So
when I concluded my shopping about 4
o'clock this afternoon, 1 decided not to
go to the recital. The '14th street car that
brought me up town passed the car that
took you down town. 1 saw you on the
open car, and wondered why you were
going in that direction. I was home at
twenty-five minutes past 4, five minutes
in advance of our ustiai dinner time, but
of course, you hid gone suppose you
had to go back to your Office to work It's
shameful the way they're overworking
you, You poor old thing" and then Mrs
Jobson. who kne* that Mr.. Jobson hadn't
been working at bis office, turned over and
subsided into dreamy slunber.
You can't beat, en- thought Mr.. job
son, when he got into bed. He was think
Ing of women in general.