Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-03-13
AUCTION SALE COMEDY.
HOW THE TRICK OF WAKING ONE
BID AGAINST SELF Is WORKED.


shepherdess-Fraised Hex Ewes Cult.
The vase was about eighteen inches
! high, and of varying diameter. 1t
was OF some sort of crockery OF china
wars, and it was as ornate as Lone
somehurst cottage. On one side was
Il Watteau young woman, clad in a
truly rural pink satin puffy skirt,
mostly all pleats, and an apple-green
| bodice, also satin, and shepherd
ess" hat that must have cost at least
24.S0, and white silk stockings that
ended in pink satin slippers (high
heeled), apparently No. u, cbildren's
size. The young women was engaged
in holding on to the kind of shepherd
ess' crook that shepherdesses used al
ways to carry in the old days-gilded,
and with vari-hued liberty silk rib
bons tied all over it. She was also
industriously engaged in gazing into
the branches of sapphire blue cherry
tree, wherein very red and dvery
spankable Cupid was doing the usual
act with bow and arrow. On the
other side young man, with more or
less OF the same makeup, without the
skirt, was climbing gilt ladder into
q gilt balcony shaded by Tyrian pur-
pie vines.
The auctioneer held it up.
'What am L offered for this real
thing?" he inquired, insinuasingly.
''Ladies and gentlemen, the age OF
this vawse is beyond my humble com-
putation. Moreover, do not like to
go beyond facts that L know. I do
know that this vawse adorned the
home of the Russian Minister-Cacky
--Cackyowsky- something like that
to this country seventy-two years
ago. 1t passed from his unwilling
keeping, when he was recalled, to the
household establishment CT the Gar.
The many vicissitudes through which
this vawse has passed in finall y reach
ing my humble but reverent hands,
ladies and gentlemen, were too pa-
thetic to relate. 1t suffices to say
that 1t is a gem Git to have adorned
Versailles-as, indeed, who shall say
that it never did adorh Versailles?
Ladies and gentlemen, I ask you to
make me an Offering for this yawse,
keeping in mind"
"Two dollars" said coarse, brutal
man at the far end of the room.
The auctioneer looked grieved.
Surely" said he, 'you jest.
Surely, you must be unaware OF the
merits OF the cherished school of cera.
mic art to which this"
''Two m hail." put in another low
churl with business-lile eye, up
near the auctioneer's stand.
81 perceive" said the anctioneer,
sadly, "that a spirit of merriment
peryades the room this morning 1t
is q sorry enough reflection that a
gem, prize, of this character, ladies
and gentlemen, that generation ago
would have been grabbed at by"
"Well, call it three" said the first
man to make bid.
"My friends" said the auctioneer,
shaking his head mournfully, ''are
you aware that it is among the possi-
biiities-indeed, among the probabili-
ties-that this vawse for which you
now offer me such paltry sums may at
one time have embellished tho bou
doirs of queens?-thaS the ill-fated
Marie Antoinetts herself--"
"Three-ffty," said another man
with low forehead but bright, alert
eye.
1t was at this point that the deter
mined-looking elderly woman, with
the poppy covered bonnet and the fat,
old-fashioned purse, walked in. The
love Of tradition shone in her eyes,
and she flashed look of contempt at
the bidders.
Five dollars" said she, pushing
through the crowd close to tee auc-
toneer's stand.
''Ah, madame, "saId the auctioneer,
lyon have arrive in season. It is
readily to be seen that you know
good thing when W that you have
cultivated eye, til = is to say, for
such perfect produc.s Of sadly de-
Perforated art as this. Yet L fear you,
too, strike too low note. Five l am
offered-who, then. is to make it
ten? who makes it ten?-ah, ten am
offered"
Nobody in tho room had spoken.
The determined-looA elderly wom-
an looked around defiantly and ad-
justed her spectacles defan..y.
ten am offered-who makes
it fifteen?-"
''Fifteen dollars" said the deter
mined looking woman, and all of the
rest of the rooms assemblage looked
cn with very great silence.
Fifteen am ofered.-it is dreary
enough to reflect upon it-but fifteen
1 am offered-ffteen-f
who is to display his acumen and mako
me-ah, twenty"
Nobody in the room had spoken.
twenty-five dollars" SAID the de-
termined-looking woman, and she
didn't notice the grins of the canaille
about her.
"And sold to this lady with the cul-
tivated eye for twenty-five dollars"
said the auctioneer, snappingly.
ooh, yes, said the auctioneer in an
easy whisper to friend, "when you
can get 'em to bid against themselves