davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
THE NEWEST NAPOLEON.
II He Succeeds He VIII BE Entitled
the Fifth of That Illustri-
Gus Name.

France has the best army in the
world-on paper. Insulted by England,
afraid of Germany, uncertain o. Rus
STA, and worse than all, uncertain of
herself, she lacks a number of things,
but most. perhaps, a man. 1t IS ru-
mored that there is a coup d'etat in
preparation, and that presently the
man will appear. The latter is Napoleon
v. We must not believe everything
we see in the papers, yet, should the
rumor be correct, he would not be I'M
welcome. In the present circumstances
a word or two concerning him may be
of interest.
At present a colonel of the guards at
ST. Petersburg. he has three character
istics. He IS a great chap with the
girls. That is promising. He wears no
decorations. That is TIE mark of a
really distinguished soldier. He in
sists on being addressed as Imperial
highness." That is the prelude to sire"
Still young. good looking without be.
ing alarmingly so. at his hours what
the French call charmeur. he has sue
ceede6 IN charming the czar. In view
of Frances spaniel crouch at that door
this means a good deal. His name, too,
is potent. Napoleon may rhyme with
Sedan, but it rhymes even better with
Aus;erlitz.
But why, it has been asked should
the grandson of Jerome Bonaparte be
Napoleon "? For two reasons First,
because the prince imperial would have
been Napoleon IV.-would have been,
that is. provided other things were fav-
orable; second, because there is luck in
odd numbers-particularly in his fam
lily. 1t is worth noting hat the third
emperor, in spite of the king of Rome.
intended to call himself Napoleon H.;
but after the coup d'etat, when his
name was billposted. that which the
printer had intended for three excla-
nation points after it was mistaken for
the mineral III. Being of good augury,
it was accepted. 1t is in this way that
history is made.-Collier's Weekly.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
Salariea of PreaIdenta.

Very few persons would suspect how
small the salaries of presidents of re-
publics are. when the enormous
amounts crowned heads receive are
taken into consideration. The foreign
er often thinks the $4,000 salary of the
president of the United States is merely
Il joke. and that he receives ten times
as much in reality, but the same for
eigner may not know that the French
president, in a country where the
wealthiest monarchs one reigned, re-
ceives only $4,000 a year. The presi-
Gsnt of the little Andorra republic con-
tents himself with a salary of SIS a
year, and the president of the Swiss re-
public. must be satisfied with So. O00.-
Chicago Inter Ocean.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
INQUIRY SOON ABANDONED.
Father Stops Questioning When
His Smart Son Mixes Slang
and Hfstory.
phia Times.

A ten-year-old Cedar avenue boy is
quite a reader, considering his tender
age, and his father delighted in
aging his literary taste. Not long ago
the father suggested to the boy that he
should read up on the life and death of
Nathan Hale. the spy and hero of the
revolution.
A few evenings later the father asked
the lad if he had carried opt his request.
The boy said he had.
"Who was Nathan Hale?" the father
inquired.
"He was stringed up by the British
soldiers" was the somewhat %irreverant
reply.
You should say hanged" said the
father.
"Stringed up is just the same" said
the boy.
"No." said the father, cit isn't just
the same"
Well" said the boy. ats just the
same to Nathan Hale"
This was something Of a poser, and
the father discreetly changed the sub
ject.
"And why did the British hang Ma
than Hale?" he asked.|
Because" replied the boy promptly.
because he rubbered for Central Wash
ington."
This %atrocious definition Of a spy's
was too much for the father. and
he promptly dropped the Hale inquiry
there and then.-Cleveland Plain Deal
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
SCHOOL AND CHURCH.

Five new Presbyterian churches have
been erected in the Adirondacks the
past year.
In 1886 the expense Of Prussia for
each child in school was six dollars;
IN 1896 it was nearly nine dollars.
The American Bible society has cir.
culated 6.394.06l volumes in China, OF
which 5O0,5S4 were issued last year.
A famous musician say that so per
cent. of the Germans understand mu-
sic. 16 per cent. of the French. and two
per cent. of the English.
The highest church in Europe is St.
Maria de Ziteit, above Solux. It is
2,434 meters above sea level-nearly
5000 feet above the forests.
The Methodist Episcopal church
board of missions appropriated s1.174.-
FOG to foreign and domestic missions
for 1s99-an increase of nearly s45.O 900.
Ex-senator George E. Edmunds. for
merly Of Vermont. but now a resident
Of Philadelphia. has been elected a
trustee of jefferson medical college of
Pennsylvania.
Bishop Hurst is enthusiastic over the
American university of which he is the
head, and be declares that it will get
S1,oO0,000 from the Methodists of Penn
sylvania alone.
In Frankfurt. Germany. there is a
reform gymnasium" or high school,
which is attracting much attention. 1t
teaches French first. then Latin, and
Greek only in the last year.
Commodore Philip has been elected
a member of the Young Mems Chris
tian associations international COM
mittee. and chairman of the subcom-
mittee in charge of the associations
work in the navy.
Pho Mono b%egueathed to the church
100000 francs in gold. Leo XIII.
has almost doubled that sum. which is
deposited among various European
banks. The holy see has no debts.
those which existed having been all
paid by the present pope.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
RIlEY'S FOLKS.

sometimes. when things don't seem to &c
tes' right about the place,
"hen bein' pore seems jes' as bad as bein
In disgrace.
When everything goes wrong. you know,
as sometimes they will do,
And he lue that should be in the sky Is
all penned up in you
IT'S then / like to jes' sit down all by my.
self somewheres,
With one o. Riley's books. to sort O. bright.
en- up affairs.
Them people Riley writes abou, has ,ed
blood in their veins,
They're folks that lives and breathes
they've got their joys and aches and
pains:
Each one OF 'em has got a heart-you al
most feel 1t beat;
They're not imaginary folks, they're peo-
pie that we meet.
And when they stand before me as he
paints EN- I'm inclined
To feel a sort of proudness that I'm one O.
Riley's kind.
I mind how kind of choked I was when my
boy went away.
Tears wouldn't come and seemed as il the
load grew ev'ry day:
l ouldn bear to hear folks tell how bad
they felt fer me-.
Until, one day, 1 got a book that Riley'd
wrote. and see
That pome on Little Wesley, Well, the
tears come freely then,
And so took the burden up and pushed
ahead agen.
Some people want to live in towns and put
on lots O. style.
They'd like 10 roll in money and do nothin'
ali the while,
But I'm not one O. them. they amt the sort
O. stuff, you bet,
That made this LAND the gloriousest the
sun has shone on yeti
| want to stay where nature planned it
best fer me to be
To love and live with Riley's folks .hat's
good enough fer me.
S. +. kiser. in Cleveland Leader.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28

<h>iS.
was not a chance for some new Erofes-
siun: if among our million wants there
WAS not n that was not already sup
piled.
"Tne idea came TO me by accident. J
was stopping at my uncle'S house. when
he received as a present from his wife's
brother a singularly ugly but very vaIu-
able pair of oriental vases. His wife's
brother was frequently N my nncle's
house. and therefore these abomina-
? lions had to be displayed. heard him
grumbling about this. l suggested that
he should sell them. The idea was. of
course, absurd; he told me so. Nor, he
said, could he break them himself, for
his wife's brother would never forgive
him: nor could he ask his wife to break
them, because, although he has beeu
married Is years. he felt that he did no.
know her well enough; nor could he
ask the servants to break them, for
that would encourage carelessless and
thriftlessness on their part.
That is all right 1 said. l rose
from my place and smashed the vases,
one after the other, on the floor. Sorry
| was so clumsy l said; you had bet
ter ring. and have this rubbish cleared
away.
HE rang and told the servant that l
had broken them accidentally. When
she had gone he said, without a smile:
1t seems rather a pity 1 said: 4 am
short of ready money. Could you lend
me five pounds?' He wrote me a check
for 20, and said that I vas a useful man
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28

The United States government shaves
its senator's; likewise it cuts their hair
and trims their whiskers. Three ne
groes, n drawing $1,000 per annum
and the others receiving $40 apiece.
are paid to keep our senator's well
groomed as to their heads. No one has
ever been able to tell precisely why the
government looks after the personal
appearance of its senators. AS the dis
bursting officers of the senate said re-
Gently. this is the custom which has
prevailed from time immemoriai. 1t is
assumed that the custom is adhered to
because there is a precedent for it. and
the senate is welded to precedents.-
Chicago Chronicle.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
ROME OF OLD.
The City as II A. pearedt to the Hero OF
n Story of the Twelfth
G. injury.

Gilbert had reached Paris in the train
of Duke Godfrey in September; the
Christmas bells were ringing when he
first caught sight of the walls AM: tow
erS of Rome. As he drew rein On the
crest of a low hill. the desolate brown
waste OF the Campagna stretched be-
hind him mile upon mile to north ward.
toward the impenetrable forests of
Niterbo, and Rome was at last before
him. Before him rose the huge. half.
ruined walls Of Aureiian, battered by
Goth and Saracen and imperial Greek;
before him lowered the fortress IF Ha-
driah's tomb, vast. im~pregnable. Zero
cious. Here and there above the
broken cancellations of the city's bat
Elements rose dark and slender towers.
square and round. marking the places
where strong robbers had fortified
themselves within the city. Blu. from
the point where Gilbert halted Rome
seemed but a long brown ruin. with
portions standing whole. as brown as
the rest under the bright depths of
vaulted blue, unlocked by the leas.
fleece of cloud in the matchless
c%learness of the winters morning
Profound disappointment came upon
him as he looked. With little knowl-
edge and hardly any information from
others who had %journeyed by the same
road, he had built himself an imaginary
city of u~nspeakable beauty, wherein
graceful churches rose out of the sunlit
streets and fair open places planted
with lordly n of trees. There,
in his thoughts, walked companies of
men with faces like the face OF the
great Bernard, splendid with inno-
cence, radiant with the hope of life.
Thither. in his fancy, came the true
knights of the earth, purified of sin by
in the holy places of the cast, to
renew unbroken vows of chastity and |
and faith. There. in his dream.
the venerable father of bishops.
the vicar Of Christ, the successor OF
the spotless head of the Holy |
Catholic and Apostolic church.
There, in his heart, he had made the
dwelling of whatsoever things are up.
right and just and perfect in Heaven.
md pure and beautiful on earth. That
was the city of God, of which his soul
was the architect, and in which he wa.
be a dwel,er, in peace that should
pass understanding. Marion Craw.
ioro- in Cen.ury |
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
Curiou. Light of Firenie..

The light of firefiies contains photo
graphic rays, which will pass through
aluminium. cardboard or copper plate;
the rays are capable of reflection and
probably %refraction and polarization:
this indicates the presence of rays be-
longing to the ultraviolet class. and if
this is so they are probably the same
as the rays emitted by uranium. known
as Becquerel rays; besides these invis;-
lie Photographic rays it contains or
binary light rays. The organ producing
them consists of a transparent. super
fetal layer which gives off the light. and
CT a deep Opaque layer whose function
is not obvious; the ultimate branches
of the trachae or air tubes are distrib-
uted through this apparatus. as are
also nerve fbers.-Scientific American.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
The Breaker
By Barry Pain
y APPEARANCE he was about


commonplace as other people
middie-aged man, inclined to portli-
ness. As the train moved on he dis
cuSsed commonplace subjects with me
i'll Il commonplace way. | should no:
have been surprised 20 have been tolI
that he was a stock broker, or a solic-
itOr. or that he was engaged in the tea
trade. In the course of our chat some
thing happened to be said about Curl
Gus occupations.
Well" said my companion, 81 do no:
suppose that there is any more curious
occupation than my own. l am a
breaker"
He had moi at all the appearance of a
nan used TO horses; but | suggested:
"A horse-breaker, you mean"
No" he said, lust a plain breaker.
\ man who breaks things, breaks my
thing that requires to be broken; gets
his living by breaking things that any
one wants broken"
| glanced ~nervously at the commu-
nicator though he looked even less like
4 lunatic than he did like a horse
breaker.
Il see,' he said, smiling. that 7 must
explain. When l left Cambridge. with
a classical degree, no prospects, and no
influence, | looked about for a profess
sion. l found everything oyercrowded;
besides, O of the professions APP
pealed to me at all. / like to travel
about 4 little. and l enjoy socia; life.
[ like taiking-talking to anyone. L
hate work of any kind. This being the
ease I looked about me - see i there
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
Killed by Hailatorm.

During the extraordinary hailstorm
which visited Manila on October 10 sew
eral goats were killed while at pasture
on Corradino. The hailstones are de-
scribed as being Of abnormal size. In
many cases they were larger than q
good-sized duck egg. in some places
larger than an orange. and several ere
Sid to have weighed half . pound
Cincinnati ENQUIRER
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
R%AILR0ADING IN CHINA.
The Advent Of h Iren Horse Ansns
the Celestials Was Not At
All Welcome.

Mr.. Cox. who was recently assaulted
near Peking. had had many similar ex-
periences during the dozen years he has
been railroad building in the Chilli
province and has only extricated him.
self by dint Of tact. pluck and good hui
NOR. he has practically for years car
ried his life in his hand. In 1890, for
instance, during the floods. a mob, led
by the soldiery of Lutai. a military
camp near Tien-Tsin. cut the railway
embaukment and destroyed seven miles
of their line, their officers encouraging
them and enlightened Viceroy Ii Hung
Chang, in his yamen a few miles OFF.
'layin' low and sayin' muffin" The
cause alleged was that the embankment
prevented the flood water from running
off. which. as there were frequent out
let's. was utter nonsense. Previous to
that attempts had been made to wreck
trains and the lives of the foreign EN-
ployes were constantly threatened.
The life too of the foreign guard on q
train is not always a happy one. Man
darins' servants without tickets take
possession of a first-class carriage; eat,
drink. sleep and perform other func-
tons of nature in it. Perhaps they
light 4 pan of charcoal to warm them
selves if the weather is cold. Charcoal
has certain asphyxiating effects; the
other passengers complain and the
servants have to be elected. Too much
violence might lead to a general attack
IN foreigners and another Tien-Tsin
massacre, while too little would not be
effective. The unhappy guard has to
follow the happy" mean between a
good hard push and a mild knock-down
blow.
There have, of course, been many ludi-
crous as we'll as dangerous incidents on
the North China line. When it was
first opened Chinese would come to the
booking office and try to bargain for
tickets. When told the fare they would
offer half and gradually raise their bid,
much Disguised that they should not, in
a business spirit, be met half way.
One day a country gentleman on his
first ride in a train seeing his house
midway between two stations flying
past deliberately opened the door and
stepped out into space. At the pace the
train was going a European would GER
tainly have been killed. but the supple
celestial, after a prolonged series of
somersaults, was seen TO pick himself
and bundle up. dust his clothes and set
off home across the fields-much
pleased with his short cut and the con-
venience of the fire wheel carriage"
An unfortunate railway coolie. equal
ly ignorant of the laws of mechanics,
did not get off so well. Seeing two
trucks coming at a snail's pace down n
he placed his foot on the rail 10
stop them. To his establishment it was
cut off and he learned, like Stephen
COW, that momentum is made of
mass as well as velocity.
But. in spite of everything. railways
are bound 10 prosper in a country
travelling is otherwise so slow
and difficult, carts and ponies in the
Iorth and boats in the south never do
ing more than 80 or 40 miles between
and dark.-London News.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
HUMOROUS

Are these real down pillows?" "Oh.
no. they're only marked."-Yonkers
Statesman.
What can equal the warmth of .
true woman's lover asked the dearest
girl. Her temper" replied the savage
Observation-Disclosures.
What makes you think the English
man regards his engagement IS .
joke?" Because he takes it so serious
ly."-Brooklyn Life.
Where there is one woman who trims
her own bonnet there are scores who
pick other women's bonnets to pieces.
Boston Transcript.
VIVA, Spoiled It.-Newcomer Cat win
ter health resort)-"Is this a restful
place." Native-"Wsl. it used to be
until people began comm here to rest"
Puck.
Love may be blind, Mr.. Cheaply,"
said Miss Quickstep. coldly. as she
handed him back his ring with the al
legged sapphire, but it isn't stone
blind."-Town Topics.
Nhat Will happen 10 you II you ara
good, little boy?" asked the kindly old
lady. "IIl get a stick of candy for be-
ing good" And what will happen to
you if you are bad?" I'll get two
sticks of candy for promising to try to
be good."-Chicago Evening Post.
"Oh. that 1 should have married a
funny mani" she walled. what is the
matter, dear?" asked her most intimate
friend. HE came home and told me he
had a sure way to keep jelly from
molding at the top. and when 1 asked
him how, he said to turn it upside
down."-Cincinnati Enquirer.
A German actor played the role OF
the parricide Franz in Schiller's Rob
bers" so realistically in a remote village
that several indignant peasants way
laid him after the performance and
gave him a sound thrashing. While the
blows were falling thick the actor ex-
claimed, proudly: II thank you gen.
tlemen. This is the happiest hour o.
my life."-Fliegende Blaetter.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
FRENCH ARE PHILOSOPHERS.
They Give the Impression of Being
the Happiest People In the
World.

The more nations / make the ac
quaintance of the more deeply con-
firmed l get in this conviction, that the
Frenchman, with all his faults and
shortcomings, is the happiest man in
the world. OF course. the wealthy
classes have everywhere found the way
of enjoying life, more or less. but TO
the observer of national characteristics
these classes are Interesting. Good So
cicty is good society everywhere. For
a study, give me the masses of the peo-
pie. And it is among the masses in
France that, after all, l find the great
esl amount of happiness. The French
man is a cheerful philosopher. He
knows best of all how to live and enjoy
life. Moderate in all his habits, he par
takes of all the good things that nature
has placed a; his disposal. without ever
making a fool of himself.
He understands temperance in the
true acceptation of the word, which
means. not total abstinence. bus mod
Grafton. When you say that a country
has a temperate climate you do not
mean that it has no climate at all; you
mean that it has Il climate which is
neither too hot nor too cold. We have
no teetotalers, because we practically
have no drunkards. A Frenchman
would be as astonished to find that the
law prevented him from having a glass
of wine. because a few imbeciles use
wine to get drunk with. as he would to
find that the law forbade him to use
knives in his quiet and peaceful, home.
Lecause there are a few lunatics who
use knives to commit suicide with or 10
kill their fellow creatures. - North
American Review.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28
Thev Are All Cousips.

Every crowned head of Europe. with
;he exception Of that Of Turkey. is 10
sceuded from one of vi sisters. the
of Duke Ludwig Rudolf Of
brunswick Wolfenbuttel. who lived
about $50 wears aro.-Golden DAYS.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28

Grandma-What do they mean by the
"ante-bellum times?"
Grandpa-Oh! That means way
back in the times befoyp We were mar,
Pied.-Puck.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-01-28

Have you got any engagements at
present." l asked.
Yes" he said; Il am going to one
now but it is a trifling thing. requir.
ing no tact at all. Had l an assistant
I should have sent him. l am to go
the day after a wedding reception when
the presents are being packed. Those
which, from their ugliness or worthless
ness, are not worth packing up and
sending to the bridegroom's distant
home have been placed on a separate
shelf. l shall upset hat shelf and &C.
cidentally stamp on anything which is
not broken in the fall. The job won't
take five minutes, and I get three
g%uineas for it. l am doing it for the
bridegroom without the knowledge of
the bride. Men begin to deceive women
very soon, l find"
Il have" l said, lone or two little OBJ
jects in my w home which"
But at this moment the train entered
Victoria station, and, though l man
aged to complete my sentence and my
companion said hat he would be glad
at any time to oblige me or my friends,
in the confusion of u arrival l neg
to take his name or to give him
mine.-Black and White.