The Daily Ardmoreite. [volume] (Ardmore, Okla.) 1893-current, 1899-07-23
Mr.. EPIZOOT WILKINS.
He Relates His Experience at St.
Louis "ez q Harmunizer nv VaErant
Idees" mt the Recent Meeting of the
Democratic Committee.

Idees" mt the Recent Meeting of the
Democratic Committee.
copyright, 1899. by American Press Asso-
ciation.l
WASHINGTON. D. G.
Ez a harnunizer Nv vagrant idees |
considered it tn be mi dooty tn attend the
lait meetin NV the Dimicratic National
Committee wich wuZ held in Saint Louis.
in the Dimicratic stait Nv Missouri. About
twenty members wuz present, and 1t wuz
desided thet the exigencies Nv the sitooa-
shun justiide US in deein with thet num-
Der, in speekin wv en- es two-thlrds Nv
fortr-6ye l menshuned the subjeck tn
Mr.. Bryan hoo | he'd never met befoar.
and ne sed thare wuz no reesun why
twenty cooon't be called two-thirds NV
forty-tive eE eaZy eZ fifty cents wurth Nv
silver Good be called dollar. In fact
twenty wood hev alwaZe bin Nv thet size
If it hedn't bin fer the crime NV 10 and
the unconstitooshunal encroechments Nv
the Goldbugs. Ez it wuz. he sed he wuz
in faver Nv Elanetanin thet rasho with
out vatin fer the konsent Nv emmy furrin
nations.
The members Nv the National Commit
tee wuz called tugether fer the purpus Nv
organizin sum harmuny fer next yeer-
Tha wuz expected tn du in St. Louis. on
a big scale, whut | he'd failed tn du in
Washington on a small wun in mi hum
BILE wa After we he'd organized and
compared notes we found we he'd gained
nothin bi changin the center Nv disturb
ance A Goldbug Dimcrat wuz jest ez
oncompromsin and onreazunable in st.
Louis ez he wuz in Washington, and
free silverite wuZ jest eZ big n fool in
wun place ez he wuz in anuther. We
Good mostly agree upon drinks. and he'd
no violunt outbrake consernn the bill Nv
fare; but wen it cum tn shapein out
pattern fer a platform US prinsiples fer
q crate politikal party tn yoose year
ahed. we run aginst moar snags than
Mississippi River steamer. We he'd a fu
men hoo insistid upon the gold standard
sich ez Mr.. Cleveland insists upon. We
he'd moar hoo wantid whutever Mr.. Bry-
an wantid. Then we he'd sum thet didn't
kno whut tha wantid except that tha
wantid tn git intu offs and didn't care
how tha got thare Most NV EN- felt thet
the heethen Nv the Fillipeen Islands
coodn't git fair deel ez long eZ Dewey
and Otis wuZ oppresSin them with the
Amerikin army and navy. and sum nv
the western members hoo he'd sons in the
thet emmy man hoo simpathized with sich
Uneasy heethen wuz no better than the
heethen themselves. We all agreed thet
it wuz our dooty tn fte imperialism" if
we Good only find out fer sure jest whut
Imperialism WIZ, and thet we wuz agin
''expanshun if "eXpanshun wood help
the Republican party. The tariff. we con-
cluded. wuz tu Inutch Nv hot potater tn
handle safely es all our predickshuns
consernin it he'd bin nocked in the he'd bi
the fggers at the custom house and the
internal revenoo buroo.
Only one issoo renamed beside Mr..
Bryan's idol Nv free silver and thet wuz
tn maik n howly howl about the Trusts
Mr.. Bryan insisted thet hiz idol shood
head the processhun. but we prevailed up
on him tn sidetrack it fer a little vile.
ontil we Good feel the Dimicratic pulse.
with the onderstandin tibet it Good be
trotted out agin if it wuz thot best tn du
so. Under these condishuns he consented
tn talk tn us about the Trusts and pro-
seeded tn whoop it up fer us at the rate
Nv hundred wurds minnit. ! must sa
thet Mr.. Bryan hez timber tung and kin
yoose it tn hiz advantij. He kin speek
with moar stile and put in moar big licks
than emmy Moo Gersey Dimicrat Nv mi
ackwaintance-not eXceptin mi next door
udDer, MT. OleNeluuO. lie talked Iu us
upon the wickedne Nv the Trusts. Jest
ez if no Dimicrat he'd ever gone intu EN-,
and loaded us up with ammoonishun tn
fire of in smaller charges doorin the next
campane. IF the government kin Gre
ate" sed be. ''it kin destroy. and it is its
first dooty tn curb the monster combi-
nashuns Nv kapital tibet thretten tn over
whelm US. We kinnot expect emmy releef
frum the Republikins-fer the Trusts
own them body and sole. The only hope
wich the people hev left is in the Dimi-
cratic party wich stands agin all sich on
constitooshunal enkroaehments upon the
liberties Nv the common people,"
"Excoose me fer interruptin w, COL"
sed /, ''but does thet mcleod sich Dimi-
Gratis ez our lait Sugar Trust Senator.
Jim Smith. and William c. Whitney. and
Mr.. Dick Croker. and lots Nv other Dimi
Gratis like EN-. hoo air intu the Trusts
clear up tn their necks. and will git in
deeper if tha kin git the munney?" "Tha
air G6ldbucs." sed Mr.. Bryan, land no
better than Republicans"
"Tl5en how about the Populists with
whom w air in sympathy" sed |. agin
interruptin him. "rha want the guver-
ment tn buy up all the telegrafs. and all
the ralerodes. and about everything else.
Now woodn't that be creatin Trusts hi
IQe government. anu lne very DlESeSl
kinds Nv Trusts. too. exactly the thing
yu air komplainin about?''
mi frend." sed Mr.. Bryan. ''the Popu-
lists hev nothin but brains and hair. Tha
hev no munney. and don't expect tn hev
onless sum rich relativ onexpecktedly dies
and leeyes them a legacy Then tha turn
Republicans and put their funds intu the
Trusts. But like most people hoo hev
manijed tu steer cleer Nv wealth doorin
their lifetime. tha kno how the government
ort tn be run. and how its fnanshal af-
fares sbood be konducted. and the wick
edness Nv accumoolatin munney in the
rong hands. Con6denshally. / may sa tu
yu that neither the Populists nor the Dim
icrats wood be fritened by a government
Trust il tha Good only control it. Jest
imagine fer yourself how we shood be
fixed il we Good only git hold NV a few
hundred thousand extra offices tn throw
around amung our trends"
a+'Tha Noo CarSav nimicr1tS wood xuo nf