davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
PITH AND POINT.

Gossip is a cartridge fired from the
gun of idle curiosity. Chicago Inter
Ocean.
BE patient with your daughter, the
girl graduate. After she has been out
of school few years she will acknowl-
edge that you know more.-Atchison
Globe.
THE way Jack Bright is devoted to
that Plunkett girl is ahead of anything
| ever came across" How does he
show it?'' 'You know Ma Plunkett--
weighs 200 pounds?n Eyes, Jack is
teaching her TO ride wheel! Cleve.
land Plain Dealer.
Had a putty bad cyclone over in your
county last week. didn't your SHOULD
say we had! Worst ever scent Itleft
things mixed up almost as bad as the
stuff in a bureau drawer after a wom-
ans tried to find something there
Chicago Daily News.
An English Peculiarity.-'Isn't San
Tomas an English town." asked Van
Braam. "Of course not" replied Din
widdie. ITS Philippine town. What
made you ask if il were English?" 81
noticed that the 81 had been dropped"
Pittsburgh hronicle-Telegraph
Gentlemen of the jury" asked the
clerk of the court, shave you agreed
upon a verdict ~ "We have" replied
the foreman. 1.-THE verdict of the jury
is that the lawyers have mixed this case
up so that we don't know anything at all
about it."-Philadelphi North Ameri-
can.
just the Same Way.-"That's a rather
extreme gown that Miss Sheckels is
wearing. Doyounotice how it is held up
by single strap across her shoulder
"Yes, and it reminds me of old times. j
knew her daddy when he had but one
suspender and wore it just the same
way."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
"Mr. Scripps," said the head of the
firm, 'the firm is very much pleased
with the work you have been doing"
THANK you, sir" he replied, and the
Vision of a raise grew more distinct.
yes" continued the head of the firm,
1--WE are very much pleased with your
work, and-well, we thought you would
be glad to know that you are giving sat
isfaetion. "-Philadelphia North Amer
lean.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

Those who ship fruit to market may
not be familiar with the methods of
handling fruit by the carrier and mer-
chant. Fruit started from the farm
may be apparently well and properly
packed and yet arrive in the market
in poor condition. The packing of the
fruit for market requires Judgment and
experience. There is something TO
learn and every grower should give
some time to securing information in
that direction. One of the most impor-
tant points is to have the fruit uniform
and of the same quality at the bottom
of the basket or box as at the top
Buyers always make close examination.
Rural World.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
Tha TrnnhIe mith mi

81 wish you would tell me what is the
matter with this watch, said the customer,
passing it over the counter.
1T stops occasionally and you have to
shake it hard to make it go, don't your" in
quired the jeweler, after he had examined
the timepieoe with the aid of an eyeglass.
Yes"
Sometimes you have to open it and start
the balance wheel with a toothpick or
something of that kind?"
Eyes"
Perhaps you don't blow through the
works to get the dust out as often as you
should"
1--WE done that dozens of times, and it
doesn't seem to do any good"
what really ais the watch is that it
has a darned fool for an owner" said the
jeweler.
This, however, was the remark he made to
himself. What he said to the customer was
that it needed about five dollars worth of
epairs.-Chicago Tribune.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
THE Widest LIONS.


Judge, jury. gallows, rope and al
Baltimore Sun.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
THE COWS TEETH.

years old, still one may judge near
enough for all practical purposes. If
a cows mouth presents an eight-year-
old appearance. it does not make much
difference If she is nine or ten. She
will. in all probability, last as long as
the average eight-year-old COW. Deal
ers will often insist that the ten-year-
old mouth here illustrated belongs to
the seven-year-old COW; but that is no
reason why the buyer should be de-
ceived. He can easily learn for him
SELF Grant Morse, in Rural New
Norker
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
Making Meat Balls and RissoIes.

Chop sufficient cold roast beef to
make one pint; mix with it half pint
of stale breadcrumbs, a tablespoonful
of chopped parsley, half a teaspoonful
of the grated rind of lemon, a tea
spoonful of salt, and two whole eggs
slightly beaten. Divide into balls about
the size of an English walnut. Beat
one egg until well mixed; add half a
cupful of milk, and stir this carefully
into half a cupful of flour; strain to
make sure that you have it perfectly
smooth. Drop the meat balls into this
batter, and then into smoking-hot fat;
drain on brown paper and send at once
TO the table. Beef rissoles may be
served plain or with tomato or brown
sauce.-Ladies' Home Journal.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

New Jerseys good roads bill, appro-
priating 100000 for permanent stone
roads. has passed the senate and will
probably go through the house. This
is $50. 900 more than the former annual
appropriations. but every dollar of il
is already spoken for. If the state
should appropriate 100000 it would
hardly more than meet the requests for
state aid in the building of the stone
roads already laid out and waiting for
the states share in the cost of their i'm
provements.--El Elizabeth IN. j. Jour
nal.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

married him. He is now the'Duc DAT
COS, and Spanish minister to this coun-
try.
There are people here who affect to
believe that the Lowery residence,
which is for sale, would be exceptional
ly acceptable to Admiral Dewey as a
gift from the nation. But at the same
time it is suggested that, maybe, Miss
Virginia Lowery, now the Duchess
D'Arcos, may desire to make use of her
childhood's home as the home of the
Spanish minister and his bride.
This sounds little like romance. But
it is gospel truth. SMITH d. FRY.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
HANDY GARDEN MARKER.
How to Make a Device That Is oper-
ated by Hand and Does Its Work
TO Perfection.

A light marker for making garden
rows, to be run by hand, may be made
on the plan shown in the illustration.
The bar, a, is strip of board about
four inches wide and six feet long.
Fastened to the center is a tongue, b.,
with wooden braces TO keep ii firmly
at right angles with a. At each end OF
the strip, a, is a detachable runner.
The center runner, c, is attached to the
tongue. 1t will be explained later.
One of the runner attachmentsissh shown
more plainly at (. 1t consists of a
short, wide runner firmly fastened to
a strip Of board 2ls feet long. The
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
Her Estimate.

"You ought to be very proud of your
husband remarked caller to the wife
of a great man.
"Proud?" was the response of the
worried-looking wife. What's the use
of being proud of man who can talk
political economy and the needs of so
ciety. if he hasn't sense enough to put
on an overcoat when it's chilly p
Washington Star.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
An IRRITATING phrase.

"Are you seriously ill?" asked the well
meaning friend. ooh, no" answered the
dyspeptic, with Earring, sarcastic laugh
Il hurt all over and don't care whether tbs
sun rises tomorrow or not But I'm not Sc
caiiy in. I'm going through ali the symp
toms, but don't mean one Of them. Wash
inpton Star
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
The WAY Men Are.

Lillian Marie. does your husband
get vexed if you interrupt him when
he's talking?
Marie-No; but he gets furious if |
interrupt him when he's eating or
sleeninp. Free Press.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

Write today to Allen s. Olmsted, Leroy,
N Y, for FREE sample OF Aliens Foot
Ease, powder to shake into your shoes. 1t
cures sweating, hot. swollen, calious, ach
ing feet IL makes tight shoes easy. Cures
Corns, Bunions and Ingrowing Nails. All
druggists and shoe stores sell it, - cents.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

colored messenger

Look There's colored messenger
boy running"
''Sure enough. They ought to adver-
tise him as warranted fast black -
Philadelphia Bulletin.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
The United states a Power for Good.

The United States a Power Tor tToous
a distinguished historian writes, while
onizing power, that we represent the .'cen-
turys political conscience" and that our
influence for good over European spheres
will be immense. This result was just as
inevitable as is the cure which follows the
use of Hostetter's Stomach Btters, the
great remedy which is found in every home
and drug store throughout the country. 1t
cures Indigestion, constipation, overworked
kidney and liver, allays nervousness, and
tones up the whole system.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
Dninty Summer Bnth.

For a refreshing summer bath use soft
water Make dozen or more cheese cloth
bags Fill them with oat meal, and finely
shaved Ivory Soap, add a little powdered
orris root, mix well, and tie up securely. One
bag in a tub full of warm water will make q
delightful, cleansing bath, and render the
skin soft and smooth as velvet.
ELIZA r.. PARKER,
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
ObeyinK Orders,

SIS the lady of the house at home to call.
ers?"
mo. sir; not to-day"
"But tell her that it is the doctor who has
called
impossible. sir; she can't see you. She is
sick La Carieature.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

Gosh durn those Filipiny fellers, any.
how" muttered Uncle Josh; 81 KANT keep
track ov EN-" Dew tell, JOSH" Yep;
I've got me eye on Aguinaldy an Agoncilly
all right, but who in thunder kin this Teller
Archie Pelago be?"-Philadelphia Record.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
His Practice.

"Say, you knew Deacon Hardway's boy
Hen, who went up to the city to study med
icine, didn't your
"Oh, yes; / knowed Hen well. What
about him?"
'He killed himself day before yesterday. .
"You don't say! What was the matter!
Couldn't he git no outside praetice!"-Chi
cago Times Herald
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
THE AGE OF A cow.
with the Aid of the Three Diagrams
Here Given IL Can Easily BE
Told by the Teeth.

BY looking at the teeth of cows of
which one knows the age, he may soon
become well acquainted with their APP
pearance. While it is impossible to tell
exactly the age of COW when over five
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
The Cornfed philosopher.

ST should like to be informed" said
the Cornfed Philosopher, of the why
ness of the fact that the more sisters
a young fellow has the less reverence he
has for woman ?''-Indianapolis Jour
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
A RihlIcnI Explanation,

Mrs. Peck-I could never understand
why there are no marriages in Heaven,
as the Bible says is the case.
Henry-Wen. there has got to be
some way to distinguish il from the
other place.-Puck.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
They Never speak Vow.

Mrs. Naberiy Can you give me a
good receipt for sponge cake?
Mrs. Smith--No, but | will give You
receipt for that pound of tea you Dor
rowed a month ago if if you will bring
il back.-N Y. Journal.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
Reyni Encournxcment.

"My queen" exclaimed her adorer,
timidly, may kiss the royal hand?"
My faithful subject" replied the
young woman. with an air of one gently
Gliding him, what is the matter with
the royal lips Cincinnati Enquirer.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
A Libel Refuted.

Women are cats" snapped farley,
vieiously.
Nonsense" said Dawson. did you
ever see woman try TO climb fence 2"
Harlem Life.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

"Just fancy a girl OF her social position
falling in love with a contortionist"
think she saw in him man she could WIND
round her little finger. STRAY Stores
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
Al Realistic PLAY.

GLOW very realistic plays are nova
days. remarked Mr.. Kilduff.
''Yes. they arc" replied Mr. Poindex-
ter. II attended theater a few nights
ago ard in one of the scenes a table
was spread for a banquet. and real
toothpicks were used. ~. y. World.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
ono yIrtue If Mormoni.m

One thing may be said in favor of
MorInonism: 1t doesn't throw the en-
tire burden of supporting husband
upon one woman. Chicago Daily
News.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
what to say About the baby.

The wise bachelor who is called upon to
compliment the new heir of his welded
friend can make himself popular by declar,
There is no gainsaying that. 1t isn't a bit
complimentary, and sounds like strong
praise -Philadelphia Times
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

1t should be remembered to the everlast-
ing credit of the men that when woman
becomes famous, no men claim that they
were once engaged to her.--Atchison Globe.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
r,,k .ccompIi~he. votninr

The individual who spends his Tune
in telling what he is going to do after
he gets there always fails to arrive
Chicago Daily News.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

But Short Time-"And pray" asked
the gay coquette. what is this claim of
yours to distinction?" why, replied the
lovelorn caller, Il am the man Of the houri"
Brooklyn Citizen.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
A Straight TIP.

Don't 60 to a doctor with broken heart;
he is likely to call it appendicitis and oper-
ate.-Puek.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

Via Big Four and Chesapeake & Ohio Ry'
One Fare Round Trip; tickets on sale july
2-l3-good to return until July 3lst. Can
be extended to August 18th. For full infor
nation and description pamphlets address
Chicago
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

Silas-Is your son still practicing medi-
cine?
Reuben--Nope. He's learnt it now.-N.
Y. Journal.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

'Mrs Wall says she is interested in high
art" mo doubt. Her husband IS Tres
eoer Phiadelphia Bulletin.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

Piso's Cure is a wonderful Cough medi-
cine--Mrs. w. Pickert, Van Sielen and
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

Pride and fashion are the taskmasters
who make breadwinning slavery. Rams
Horn.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

If one friends advice doesn't suit you,
keep on asking your friends until one gives
the kind you want-Atehison Globe.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

ut were better to be right than to be
president" bat it were still better to be
both.-Nirginia Etchings.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
So small.

Some awful stroke has caused relapse
The anxious doctor said;
The patient paid the modest bill
And promptly fell down dead.
N Y World
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

Some smart men are fools for revenue
only.-Chicago Daily News
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15

To Cure q Cold In Ono Day
Take Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets. All
druggists refund money lift fails to cure. 25c.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1899-06-15
Halls Catnrrh Cure
a Constitutional Cure. Price, 75c

Wit without wisdom becomes weari'
some.-Chicago Daily News.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10
Married.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS this
city, Jan. 7, 1899, by the Rev.
Mcintosh, Charles Harshman
and Miss Julia Swanby.
Mr.. Harshman was a native of
this section and passed the earlier
years of bis life in this vicinity.
Miss Swanby has been well and
favorably known to our citizens
for the past two or three years
and has won many friends.
These young people will take up
their abode in Gilby, N. d., in
the'spring, where Mr.. Harshman
has fine farm.
The TINES coDgratulates the m
and extends its hearty wishes for
their welfare.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10
C. G. Glass Chosen.

The election to choose a post
master for the city of River Falls
took place Saturday which resulted
in the election of c. c. Glass.
There were four contestants In
the race for the ofice-C. G.
Glass, G.. E. Pratt, w. S. Arm
strong and w. P. Marshall. The
contest was sharp, each man using
every possible effort to secure this
$1,000 job. The day was very
cold, yet 736 votes were cast,
showing that the people out of
town were interested as well as
those in the city, as we'll they
should be. 1t is believed that any
one of the four contestants would
have made very good postmaster,
yet as Mr.. Glass was the peoples
choice by fattering majority, with
him must rest the responsible
duty to "look pleasant "never
back talk" or "read postal cards. !"
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10
ADA MARIE GRO W
A PICTURE STORY OF
"A Vacation Trip to Europe" Illustra-
ted with


100 Superb Paintings of Eng
land, Ireland, Scotland, France
and BELGIUM.
This Coupon and 10 cents will
admit any teacher or pupil of the
Public schools.
Parents are most urgently re-
quested to accompany their chill
dren at a special rate of Is ce nts.
10000 teachers, pupils and par
ents have listened to this delight
full picture story.
General admission Is cents.
At Opera Hall, Friday and Satur-
day evenings, Jan. 13 and IA.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10
Wireless Telegraphy.

During the last year or two a
great deal has been heard of
wireless telegraphy. A knowl-
edge of results of great discover
les in the past makes the
discovery of the principle
involved in such telegraphy
seem but a prophecy Of far
greater practical applications of
that principle. Already these
prophecies seem about to be
fulfilled. Who can say what
will be the results of the two
recent achievements of the not
ed electrician, Nicola Tesla? One
of these inventions, which gives
promise Observation-Disclosures
tons is a device by which
electrical currents of almost un-
limited electromotive force may
be generated, and then transmit
ted any desired distance without
the use of metallic conductors.
The other of these devices above
referred to is an instrument Of
warfare over which the inventor
seems to be very enthusiastic,
not so much because of it's great
power ofdestruction but because
It's great destructibility will
make war impossible. It is of
the nature of a floating torpedo
which, by means of various cleo
trical contrivances contained
therein, and by the employment
of apparatus similar to that used
in wireless telegraphy, the
operator on shore may direct
against any hostile fieetand blow
it up before it comes within
range of the guns of the harbor.
.With this apparatus, " theinven-
tor declares, "the weakest nation
can protect itself against the
combined naval forces of Europe. !"
From the Normal Badger.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10
Died.

DE1ss-In Big River, Jan. 8,
1899, Anthony Deiss of la grippe
aged 81 years.
The deceased was an old resident
of the town in which he died and
was highly respected by his many
acquaintance. His funeral takes,
place in Big River today.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10
Oak Grove.

Misses Bernie and Nora Cor
coran spent Saturday with Clifton
friends.
Mrs. G.. S. Davis entertained
Miss Ida Cle mems of Prescott last
week.
Miss Ida Hall of Ellsworth
spent last week at home.
Miss Grace Filkins returned
home from River Falls recently.
Zero weather.
Peter Boles is visiting relatives
here after a two years stay In
South Dakota.
John Corcoran and sister, Nora.
returned to the Prescott High
school Monday, after two weeks.
vacation at home.
A large number of young people
surprised Mrs. T. Brackin of Big
River Wednesday evening last.
All report a pleasant time.
It's better than ready money
because it cures rheumatism con-
sick headaches, indiges-
ton. Rocky Mountain Tea,-C.
r. Taggart & Co.
Hon. G. r. Morse left last
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10

If you buy anything
at JensOn's and it is not
what it ought to be,
bring it back. We want
your trade and we also
want you to go out OF
our store locking pleas
ed.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10

The weather has moderated. Is
it owing to the heat generated by
the election Saturday!
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10

The fear that we are going to
have serious trouble with the
Philippine insurgents does not
appear to be shared bv members
of the administration. Thecable-
grams received from Gen. Otis
this week have not been made
public, but they are claimed to
have been reassuring.. A prom
inent official said of the situation
in the Philippines: eff we have
any serious trouble in connection
with our assuring authority over
the islands, it will not be with
Aguinaldo and his ignorant
followers, but with those who are
responsible for the advice which
has been given Aguinaldo by
oficlous busy bodies who are inter-
ested in trying to get up a little
war between the United States
and the Filipinos. He did not
say who were the responsible
parties, but, in view Of the general
suspicion, it would not be difficult
to guess.-W. c.
The River Falls times. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1894-1933, 1899-01-10

For SALE-120 acres of improv-
ed land all fenced, good buildings
and good water. This land is
situated four and one half miles
south of this city. Easy terms.
Apply to P. MoYNIHAN, River
Falls, Wisconsin.