The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1899-09-25
VOICES m THE SHAFT.
Passagcsin Diplomacy and Comments
BY the Tenants on the Absent.

Passages IN Diplomacy and Comments
by the Tenants on the Absent.
New York Sun: II should never
have known anything about the spread
Of information up and down the eleva-
tor shaft" said the top-fat woman, III
my housekeeper had mot gone away on
a vacation and had mot been trying to
convince my small but picturesque fam-
fly that scrambled eggs and fried pota-
toes contain eli the hydrocarbons and
protelds and all the rest Of the really
important features Of a square meal. I
missed the beginning Of the conyersa-
ton, but It seemed to be the case that
after the ashes had been sent down the
second floor lady improved the opportu-
nifty to assure the frst-hoor lady that
she thought that the woman on the
third floor intended to be away over
September also. and here she was back
at the end Of August. and probably It
was because her money had run out. 1t
is an interesting contribution to philol-
ogy that seems to have escaped Prof.
Basil Glldersleeve and the other learned
lights at Johns Hopkins that in such
air and elevator shafts conversations
the person addressed Is always a lady
and the person under discussion is al
ways the woman Of such and such a
That's very likely" rejoined the
first-floor lady, land they say she
drinks like fish, too. The janltor tells
me that Us soon as It gets dark she
PUSHES the can something awful, ana
he ought to know because she called
him down for taking a pull at 1t when 1t
came in at the front door.
"'What shame It Is said the sec
ond-hoor; I always say II you can't
have your grocer send you half dozen
bottles Won ought to bring the GROWER
in at the cellar and send It up the ele-
Vator. You've no call to bring 1t tn the
front way and give the apartments a
bad name. You might Just as well live
in tenement house and be done with
1t. 1 pity that poor girl Of hers that
she sends out with the tin. It's a shame
that's what It ISL
But here the shaft door Of the third
floor opened and the lady under dis
cusslon was prepared to take a share
in the debate.
"'Good morning to both of you be-
low she said. I'm Just back from
the sea and I'm mighty glad to get
back, can tell you. was at a place
where you couldn't get any beer for
love nor money. So I'm glad to be
back In my own home again, where
can have what l want and when
want 1t, and nobody's business. And
was hearing what you was saying Just
now about the woman that lives on top
Of me. She must be getting worse.
didn't know It was that bad with her
that she was In the way of chasing the
duck up the front stairs. But then you
ought to be charitable. Sure Its more
than once that both of yous have sent
up to me in the evening and never
asked whether the grocer had failed to
bring Il or whether yous had drunk 1t
all up during the day and had none left,
though dozen Of beer is pretty big
swIg before dark comes. and then
never thought anything about sending
out the cnn, Just SOS to be neighborly.
But I'm sorry to hear what you do be
saying about the woman above, such a
decent woman In appearance too. and
she doesn't put on any airs even though
hIle QueS nuNG u COOh anu StAAlS ASA a
housekeeper.'
"'Indeed, we have much to thank you
for said the second floor. Excuse me,
ma'am,' to the first floor. I didn't no.
tice that you was talking. Go on,
please
"oh, never mind me. ma'am,' replied
the first floor. 4 wasn't going TO say
anything particular. only what you was
saying, too. But it's shame that the
lady couldn't get her beer In the coun-
try after the doctor had told her that
she must build herself up. II would be
well II all folks was as temperate IN
what they drink as she is. She's an or
nament to the apartments and not like
some that would make you think they
never had lived but in tenements where
they rush the growler In at the front
door and never think anything of II. It's
shame. and II the janitor doesn't do
something surely some one should
speak to the agent about 1t. l would
myself. only don't want to remind
him that the September rents due
"'True for you, ladies', said the third
floor lady. 4 have to be very temper
ate In my condition Of health, the doc
tor tells me must It's big stroke
Of fortune that can't get drunk; not a
bit Of II. Sure, the first pint that goes
to my mouth It goes to my head, that
It does. Then want more, OF course,
as who wouldn't? Then they give me
buttermilk or any old thing and I never
know the difference: it's all one to me-
It's a great blessing, indeed It Is. But the
poor woman upstairs-I'll have to
speak to her and she such lady and
with a housekeeper, too"
---
Graceful Recognition.