Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1899-09-10

IN his Yest-pOck6t.'
Don't read another word Of it," snort
ed the COmmander-in-Chie ITS per-
fecty disgusting. Somebody ought 10
break the old scoundrers neck. The idea
of it-that horrid. odious old man-that
loathsome creature taking a nice young
girl unto himself. But it's just like you
men. l never saw one Of you yet who
wouldn't try 10 get some sweet, fresh
young girl for a wife,
We'll" said |. for l knew this was one
Of her favorite themes, you don't think
we ought to go TO the homes for aged
women when We wish 10 select our wives.
do you? Listen to this; it expresses my
ideas exactly. And then l read as fol-
lows:
Colonel Kissee conceived the idea a
few days ago that he had been a widower
long enough. He cOnfided TO a friend
who suggested several widows fair and
49, Nope. No hens for me; fryin' size or
none the Colonel replied. So fryn' size
1t had TO be. for having his own way Is
one Of this old mountaineer's strongest
traits. day or two after Colonel Kissee
drove TO the Garrett home. Waving
c0urtship prellminaries, he bluntly in
formed Papa Garrett that he was search
ing for a wife. He concluded his brief
had anything 10 offer. There was a brief
silence. Colonel Kissee saw several girls
with bare feet and cheeks Of tan romp-
ing about the yard. He reckoned most
any Of 'em would do. Take your pick
said Papa Garrett. A little later Miss
Dora, clad in new Bingham. was seated
alongside of the Colonel in his rickety
old buggy and they drove TO the county
seat 10 get a marriage -hcense. And Mrs.
Kssee' is now the first lady of Kissee
Mills"
"Of course. of course" scornfully re-
torted my good but strong-mnded wo-
man. And the girl was fool enough to
accept. Just like women. just like EN-;
they can't learn any sense. And that
old man will live and live and hang on
forever. She needn't count on his dying
Poor thing. l pity her"
"She did it of her own free will" !
ventured TO remark. Nobody can drive
woman. you know. II she made a
mistake she's got nobody TO blame but
herself"
There you are" shrieked the Queen
Bee, with burning indignation, you're
just like all the rest Of them. II l were
TO die / haven't a doubt you'd try your
best to get one Of these frying-sizer
yourselves, you'd want one about II
years old. I'd give you just six months
after l was in my grave. You don't
doubt for an instant that the most cele-
brated beauties in the land would fly TO
you and beg you 10 accept them"
. my. that woman was mad-hOpping
mad. The idea of my ever running my
head into the moose again makes her
spit fire. 1t occurred 10 me that / might
have some fun irritating her
Assuming a grave look. said: Dear,
oil
did wrong i'm choosing a l5-year-Old. Now,
IT, or anywhere along up TO Il. ought
to have suited him. Something In
the pullet class should have served just
as well and been plenty young for him.
II ] had been in his"
Don't you dare TO think you'll ever
get a chance TO be i'm his place" she
fairly shrieked. Never, never, never
would submit to it. I'd rise up out OF
my grave and haunt you. II ! were on
my deathbed and suspected such thing
I'd get a new lease on life. I'd have too
much mercy on the woman who was
herself away; I'd save her II
IL were possible"
At this dangerous juncture l was com
PEELED to retire in order that 1 might put
our youngest child to bed.
The Emperor william. OF Germany,
seems to look on women very much as
Sitting Bull or some Of those other old
time Indian ROSTERS regarded their
sCuaws.
Recently he was waited upon by
delegation of mOuse-feaTers, who had
the boldness 10 innict upon his nibs a
long address on the rights and wrongs
Of women. The Kaiser appears 20 have
been bored by the communication for
when II was completed he remarked: Il |
agree with my wife. who says that
women should not NEEDLE with anything !
beyond the four K's-Kinder, Kirche, !
Kuche. and Kleidung children, cooking, |
church and clOthing'D