Daily Kennebec journal., 1899-06-12
Reflections OF a Bachelor.

No woman ever learns how hard 1t Is
not to say II told you so.'
Most men aren't worth the trouble
women TAX. to get them, but a few ar,
worth about half as much.
Every girl has certain period when
she spends most Of her time looking al
things you cant see.
men a man never kisses his wife un-
less she asks him TO. it is generally a
sign that ne never has to ask her to
No man can really tell whether anoths
IS conscientious ,Lristidn or not til ht
has been around when he puts the wrOna
end Of his penholdcr IN his mouth by mis-
take. He can tell then by the way h,
looks right after he has said ii.
4 woman never fUrgiyes a man for
looking shabby himself 50 she can spend
more.
4 woman viii Ioye anything that sh,
Is with long enough The proof uf this IS
cats.
When woman puts her clothes On. snr
dresses; but when she takes them uff she
"disrohes."
! wonder why q girl always bIushes 80
after she has said that thing was about
the size Of cigarette.
Empty TWO quarts of dried peas into %
bass drum ana trim up the outside with
pink baby ribbon. ana you have thr aver
age mans idea OF his wiie's 5-u'clock teas.
Maybe they used ~ spell them Satan
slippers.
Whisky makes trouble, bu, soiled wrap
pers make havoc.
Il isn't that a woman cares 50 much
about losing "a man: shr just doesn't want
some othcr woman tO gain him.
The meanest boy tnat ever lived never
tortured a starved eat the way a "joIly
good fellow can torture his wife.
When 4 man j. smoking ana slappIng
and waving - keep of mosquitoes !,
woman IN luW-ncck gown ana open
work stockings will sit sill and smile and
Just swear inwardly.
TO satisfy man "A woman doesn't have
g know how q do anything but please
him.
a married woman always believes that
she Is the only one she knows who can
come out Of a Irritation with unsOiled
wings
The woman who knows her business
never tries 10 convinov man with argu-
ments; She does it with smiles, pouts and
tears.
When a woman IS skating on thin ice
she hopes she won't fan in: but she rs
glad that ii she does no harm will be-
done unless she gets found out.
No woman would mind getting old III
every other woman WAS older.
Dress up a log in woman's frills ana a
Juno IN plain clothes, and man Will Sc
lect the frills.
When woman puts on her stockings
she feels that she is dressed. the rest *
merely touching ~.
Give A woman the choice between being
admired or respected, ana She Will choose
being enNicd
It's funny how the people who let their
houses run themselves ana their children
go 10 the dogs are SO busy searching for
higher light ana other things.
Without her fuibles woman would be
about as interesting as man is not.
Most times the lions den has purring
kittens in it. but the fool Daniels get
cilWed just the same.
1t is early morning pillow reflections
that make i man wonder why nIs Judg
mcnt goes all to pieces sometimes.
\ mans idea of an exciting summer
day is "A seaside piazza a mint julep ana
a woman whose lips speak innocence
while her eyes look deviltry
Ii is the fool husband that confides to
you how he trained his wife to believe
his habits are all right.
Some women have way Of telling you
where mosquito has bitten them, a. If
they expected you to do something about
1t.
The woman who loves the wrong man
doesn't get any more sympathy Tor being
good ana mOpng over II than for going
to the devil with him.
When you go into a room ana the wom-
en- there stop talking suddenly YOU pre-
tend to believe they have been saying
something mean about you. ana the
chances are you needn't pretend.