The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1899-04-06

can breed thin, an then tn women an
children will get lots av pleasure watch
ing tn young Gondolas cutting up
didos on tn river front
Before the Mayor left the land of his
birth, he was mixed up in "the troubles
of 49, and was on the hills, lighting for
the rights and liberties of the little
Screen ISLE"
In one of the very few meetings be-
tween the Irish and the English John,
single handed, took no less then sixteen
prisoners, all at one time, and brought
them safely into camp.
The teat was such great one, that
the Colonel said in tones of astonish.
ment: "Why John, how in the world
did you ever do IT,"
John looked puzzled for the moment.
then said: "Begorry. Colonel, OF dinnaw,
but Oi guess OF surrounded Thin"
When the Mayor first came to this
country he was about as hot a green.
horn as ever landed
Horace Greeley's advice of "Go West"
was then being passed around, and
John accepting it, hit the pike for the
setting sun, in company with another
greenhOrn.
All went we'll with the boys, until
they approached Pittsburg, Pa. Here,
for the first time, they commenced to
notice the nice granite mile stones,
which were set along side OF the road
This stone stood about five feet high
and on each of the four sides was cut a
hand, pointing downward, with, 43
miles from Pittsburg, underneath. The
Mayors companion was a bit of an
"ommodawn," and could not think
what the stone post meant, finally he
said to the Mayor: "Sure, John, what
do thin stone posts be, thot we kape
meeting?"
"'Thlm do be monuments" says the
Mayor, 'ye see tn hand pointing down
means: here lies tn dead, age 43, an
his name is Miles. from Pittsburg."
When the Mayor is not busy keeping
the river running, he plays the star part
of ''Flash Light Johnny" in the great
Melodrama: "Watched After Dark :"
at The Minnesota State Prison. A few
evenings ago, as the Mayor passed
along the gallery, letting his light shine
for the wicked, near the end of his
round, he came to the cell of a new
arrival. The Mayor sized the new one
up for minute, then said: "My, my,
what ever brought a bright looking
young boy like We into this place."
"Alas," replied the boy, "alas, my kis-
met was against me-"
"Was he, well, tn domed round
head, it's sorry OF am fir ye."
The Mayor passed along meditating,
until he reached the sanctum of "Bill
Sykes"
'See here, Sykes what's this kismet,
thot was against by back here,
mean?"
"Kismet? Why kismet means fate"
"lt do, do it, so kismet means fate,
well, the young divil, sure he made me
think it was some Swede."
The following night when the Mayor
reported for duty, he was lame in both
feet and hobbing along in great pain.
AS he passed through the Turkeys
gate he met DIR. W, who said:
"Why John, what in the world is the
matter?"
"Arrah, Doctor" said John, "me kis-
NETS are thot sore OF can hardly walk"
The Mayor has peculiar Tastes in re-
CARDS to music, the main ingredient
must be agressiveness against England.
Here is sweet little gem from his
favorite:
o! Ireland was old Ireland,
When England was pup,
And Ireland will be Ireland,
When England's all bunged up.
I'm the scrappiest little Irishman
That ever went to mass,
And no "bloody bleeding Englishman
Dare resent my Irish sass,