davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
Swallowed a Railroad Spike.

John Woodman, king fisherman of the
state, last week caught salmon in Lake
Penneeseewassee, in Norway, Me-, that
had 14-ounce railroad spike in it's stom-
ach. The spike was dropped from Wood
mans boat a few days before while a
party were fishing for trout, the spike
having been taken to kill each fish with
as it landed, and by some accident it fell
over board.
MIR. Woodman a few days later spent
an entire day trying to get bite He
was successful, inasmuch as he landed
thirty-five black bass. However,, he de-
clared that he had come for salmon and
would stay the night out if necessary.
Finally he got a strike that he played
for some time. landing a fine salmon in
the boat. Weighing it. he found that it
was a six-pounder, but remarked that
the size of the fish was much out Of
proportion to its weight, as given by
the scales.
When he arrived home he invited sew
eral friends to see the cleaning as it was
the heaviest salmon that had been taken
from the lake this season. Cutting the
fish open, his knife struck hard sub
stance that turned the edge. Finally,
when the belly of the fish was laid open,
the railroad spike was found tucked
away in the intestines, with several
''shiners" used for bait.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
AbSent-MInded Father,

A certain learned professor has a wife
and family, but, professor-like, his
thoughts are always with his books. One
evening his wife, who had been out for
some hours, returned, to find the house
remarkably quiet. She had left the chill
dren playing about, but now they were
nowhere to be seen. She asked what
explained that, as they had made a good
deal of noise, he had put them to bed
without waiting for her or calling maid.
Il hope they gave you no trouble" she
said.
NO" said the professor, with the ex.
ception Of that one in the cot there. He
him and putting him to bed
The wife went to inspect the cot
why" she exclaimed. that's little
Johnny Green from next door!'-Buffalo
EnOTirer
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
Best Way TO make Jelly.

The only way one can be sure each
time to have satisfactory results in jelly
making is to keep trying the juice. Take
a little out on a saucer, let it cool, and
then examine it. 1t is a safer way than
to trust to a given number of minutes
The condition Of fruit is hardly ever
twice alike. If possible, when making
jelly, put the fruit after it is cooked into
a flannel bag and let it drain slowly 1t
is much more likely to be clear than if
squeezed or pressed out hastily. In max
ing elderberry jelly cook the berries till
soft. then strain through a jelly bag.
A thicker and better-favored jelly is OBJ
tanned by adding one-third grapes or ap-
pies. To every pint of juice add one
pint of white sugar.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
Why Toast is Easy to Digest.

I~7alids the world over are given their
bread in the form of toast. The lay
world is generally quite ignorant of why
this is done. 1t is because (explains e.
Densmore, M. d. toasting bread until it
becomes brown largely converts the
starch into dextrine; and hence, so far as
the brown portion is concerned, one Of
the processes of digestion is gone through
before the bread is taken into the stom-
ach. It will be found that the thinner
the slices of bread, and the more thor
oughly they are toasted the easier diges-
ton will be, and when all portions of
the slice of bread are thoroughly toasted
mot burned, but still changed to a deep
brown color-it will be found to be still
more easily digested than ordinary toast.
London Mail
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
JUDsoN w. LYONS.
Remember that cho1era morbus. chol-

Remember that cho1era morbus. chol-
era infantum, summer complaint, bilious
collie. diarrhoea and dysentery are each
and all catarrh of the bowels. Catarrh is
the only co"rect rame for these affec-
!. lions. Pe-ru-na is an absolute spec. fc
for these ailments. W hich are so common
in summer. DR.. Hartman, in practice
of over forty years, never lost a single
case OF cholera infantum, dysentery,
diarrhoea, or cholera morbus. and his
only remedy was Pc ru-na. Those desir-
ing further particulars should send for a
free copy of Summer Catarrh." Ad-
dress DR.. Hartman, Columbus, Ohio.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
April %. 1899.

April %, 1899.
Pe-ru-na Drug Mfg Co., Columbus, O.:
Gentlemen-I find Pe-ru-na to De an
excellent remedy for the catarrhal affec
tons of spring and summer, and those
who suffer from depression from the heat
of the summer will find no remedy the
equal Of Pe-ru-na.
JUDsON w. LYONS.
No man is better known in the financial
world than Judson ". Lyons. His name
on every piece of money of recent date,
makes his signature one Of the most IA
miliar ones in the United States. Hon.
Lyons address is Augusta, Ga. He is a
member of the National Republican Com
mittee, and is a prominent and influential
politician. He is a particular friend Of
President Mckinley.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
A Sudden RelapSe.

"He's a mean man." was the earnest
comment; "a mighty mean man."
What has occurred?'
II was explaining to him my success
in demonstrating the power of mind over
matter. / was telling him how | had
brought my will and my intellect to bear
upon a corn, and how l had subjugated
the delusion called pain, when he DELHI
erately stepped on my foot!-Washing-
fon
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
"Your Medicine Worked Wonders"

q had been sick ever since my mar
riage, seven years ago; have given
birth to four children, and had two
miscarriages. I had falling of womb,
leucorrhea, pains in back and legs;
dyspepsia and nervous trembling Of
the stomach. Now have none of these
troubles and can enjoy my life. Your
medicine has worked wonders for
me. Nine. S. BARNHART, NEW CASTLE,
IA.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
FREE FOR 10 DAYS.

:: ; s.: =; : +:
,r0 Il. wv, for the positive cure Of the fol-
l'''-01 ~ lowing diseases: RHEUMA-
TISM, SCIATICA, NEURALGIA,
Asthma, Hay Fever, Catarrh, Toothache,
Nervousness, Neuralgia Headache, Heart
Weakness, Earache, Malaria, Dropsy,
Creeping Numbness, BRONCHITIS and
LA GRIPPE. Don't fail to avail your
self of this great opportunity, and RE-
MEMBER it is only for 10 days from
issue of this paper. Large Bottles 900
doses $1.0O. SWANSON RHEUMAT-
&c CURE CO., 160-164 E. Lake street,
Chicago, III.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
Ladies Can Wear Shoes

One size smaller after using Aliens Foot
Ease, a powder to be shaken into the shoes
1t makes tight or new shoes feel easy; gives
instant relief to corns and bunions. It's the
greatest comfort discovery Of the age. Cure:
swollen feet, blisters and caiious spots
Aliens Foot Ease is a certain cure for in
growing nails, sweating, hot, aching feet
At all druggists and shoe stores &c. Tria
package FREE by mail. Address Allen s
Olmsted, LeRoy, II. Y.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
A Story of Sterility,
SUFFERING AND RELIEF.
LETTER TO MRS. p1NKHAx NO. 6o,1s6l

"DEAR MRS. PINKHAM-Two years
ago l began having such dull, heavy
dragging pains in my back, menses
were profuse and painful, and was
troubled was leucorrhea. I took
patent medicines and consulted a ply
sician, but received no benefit and
could not become pregnant. Seeing
one of your books, wrote to you tell
ing you my troubles and asking for
advice. You answered my letter
promptly and I followed the directions
faithfully, and derived SO much benefit
that I cannot praise Lydia E. Pink
hams Vegetable Compound enough.
I now find myself pregnant and have
begun it's use again. l cannot praise
1T enough. Mrs. CORA gibson, YATES,
MANIsTEE, MICH.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

Once upon time a Millionaire con-
ceived the idea that it would be dis
graceful to die rich. Accordingly he fell
to giving his wealth away. But it soon
became apparent that he had more wealth
than he could possibly give away in 400
years, working ten hours q day. What
shall l do?' he asked himself in much
alarm But he was a resourceful man.
and it was not long before he hit upon
the happy eXpedient of revealing all his
belongings to the assessors. That being
done, he was speedily reduced to panury.
Detroit Journal.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

A story illustrating the reticence of the
Scotch regarding their private affairs
was told by Ian Maclaren when in Bos-
ton. \ train was at railroad station
when a porter put his head into a car
and called out:
Anyone in this car for Doun? Change
for DOM? anyone for Doun:''
No one moved, and il few minutes
the train was speeding along. not to stop
again for nearly an hour. Then an old
Scotch woman turned to a lady sitting
near her and said:
I'm for Doun, but I'd no tell that
man so.'-Youth's Companion.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

Did you ever hear about the French
man, the Mexican, the Scotchman and
the Irishman talking of the ages of their
mothers when they were married? Well.
the Scotchman, he says: My mother was
married at a." The Frenchman said:
That's nothing: my mother was mar
ried at 49," The Mexican said his
mother was married at II. The Irish
man didn't say anything, and they asked
him: We'll, when was your mother mar
ried?' He said: why. she was married
before | was born. ''-EXchange.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

"Oh, Mr.. Ricketts.' said Mrs. Proons
to her star boarder, 1.-The ladies and gen
tlemen Of the house have decided to have
a picnic this afternoon. If you care to
go I'm sure we'd be glad to have YOU
Il don't know about going with the
party" replied uhgallant Mr.. Ricketts,
but what time does the relief expedition
start |'-Judge.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
Discrimination Against the Sex.

The new Hessian special taxes on
bachelors and bicycles looks Ike wanton
discrimination against two Of the prin-
cipal amuSementS of young women
Providence Journal.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
what the Duchess and 1 Saw
Europe

By Lou J. Beauchamp. the celebrated
lecturer. Full of fun. 80 prototypes of
the worlds wonders. One agent sold so
copies in one day. Complete copy with
terms for % cents. Earl Beauchamp,
Hamilton, Ohio. Agents wanted.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

According to a report just issued by
the state board of horticulture, based on
the condition of orchards May 10, Ore
CONS fruit yield this year will he about
SO per cent. of the average.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

"A number of miners came upon a lit
ter of five mountain lion whelps while
prospecting in the hills east of Logan,
Utah. An expedition at once left with
the expectation of catching the entire lit
ter alive. The cubs are about quarter
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

Thomas Dunn English has just cele-
brated his eightieth birthday at his home
in New Jersey. He is the Oldest living
graduate of the University Of Pennsyl-
vania. Still, his fame continues to rest
on the shoulders of immortal Ben Bolt.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

Writer'S and actors and artists of all
sorts and the like should keep as far as
they can from business and the haunts
thereof, says the Lights and Shadows
man Of the New York Tribune. They
are as much out of place there and as
likely to get into trouble as a business
man is when he tries to find out how an
artist looks at a forest to see it purple.
And of all people who ought to beware Of
such snares the writer Of plays is prob
ably the most helpless. One Of the flock
came IN among his brother lambs the
made him look SO sheepish. I've lost
my play he said
Then they all sympathized, for when a
man loses a play all { once he feels it deep
ly, but when he merely sends it around
from one manager to another and has it
returned, the fate of it dawns on him
gradually, he gets used to it slowly and
there is no such shock. How did you
lose lt?'' they asked.
Il had it all done'' he said, land I put
it in my pocket, thinking that | would
leave 1t with some typewriter to have it
copied. In the mean time | had occasion
to call on a friend in one of the big office
buildings downtown. l didn't know what
floor of the building his office was On,
but l just told the elevator man whom
wanted to see and he took me to the
right floor. My friend was out, and the
once BOY SAID ne nad gone 70 the bar
ber's shop in the building. l told the
elevator man to take me to the BARRIERS
shop. | didn't know what floor it was
on and | didn't notice where he took me.
but when | got there they told me my
friend had gone to the restaurant in the
building for luncheon. | told the eleya
tor man to take me to the restaurant
and there l found him. Somewhere in
the course of these wanderings | saw
card on a door that said 'Stenographer
and typewriter | thought: This is just
my chance and went in and gave my
copy to the young woman and asked her
when she would have it done She said :
Come in the day after tomorrow
The day after tomorrow meant today,
SO | went 20 get my play. When l got
to the building it occurred to me for the
first time that | didn't know the girls
name or the number Of her room or even
the floor 1t was late in the day, but
started with the twenty-ffth floor and
worked down to the sixteenth. | think
if l work all day tomorrow l can
finish the building and find the play;
but what stupid way to run a building.
Suppose anybody was going for the doe
tor, instead of a typewriter, and had to
60 through all that
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

Piso's Cure for Consumption has saved
me large doctor bills.-C. L. Baker, 422s
Regent So, Philadelphia, Pa, Dec. 8.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

Japan has established at Yokohama
an Imperial Commercial museum, mod
eled after the one in Philadelphia.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

1t is estimated that at the beginning
of the new century England will have
$4,000, 900, 900 tons of coal still unused
and aYaila BILE
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
Ella WheeIer WiIcox's Saia,

Ella Wheeler Wilcox has transferred
her allegiance from the Evening World
to the Evening Journal the inducement
being, so it is reported, 500 a week
salary.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

Miss Mary E. Wilkins is going to
Europe this summer-partly to visit in
Scotland such places as Thrums and
Drumtochty, in which she is particularly
interested, her liking for the books of
Barrie and Ian Maclaren being acute.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
THE SCORCHER.

He scorched along the boulevard;
He scOrched across the hill;
He scOrched into cable car;
We think he's ScOrching still.
Il ,iff
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

The estimated wool clip of Natrona
county, Wyo., this season is estimated at
1000 pounds.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

Mrs NfnSIOw's SOOTHING SYRUP for children
teething, softens the gums, reduces Inflammation,
allays pain, cures wind collie. 25c bottle.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

"A process has been invented and pat
ented in Brazil for preparing coffee in
tablOids by a system Of compression.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

California produces about one-third
Of the almonds consumed in the United
States
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

In Manitoba there are 100000 acres
under crops, of which 100000 is wheat.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
SPINNING WHEEL.
NEWSPAPER VERSE.

NEWSPAPER VERSE.
Between the news from seats of war,
Three stanZaS from some journal placed
Beside the message from altar,
Above recorded woe and shame.
Three stanZas from some journal placed
That Neniy the page be spaced.
oh, warb.e from singers heart!
Some sweet blind shepherd of the hills,
Tuning his ready pipe to start
A mUSing tune beside still rillS
Might so have sung q welladay,
Might so have trilled roundelay.
Three stanZaS to change all my world,
To let the sunshine through by need,
Glad laughing brooks that leaping puried
Through sunny maZes Of joys wood,
word play tit TO rouse a king
And bid him forth go wandering.
strain of music undefiled,
picture limned upon the wall
That aGrant Nerse-but as q child
Lifts Up its eyeIids at Il call.
l lift my heart, sometimes perverse.
To thank God for that vagrant verse.
Elizabeth Cherry Waltz in Cou1ier-Jour
nal.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

wANTED-Case OF bad health that R.rP.A.N-S will
not benefit Send cents to Ripans Chemical Co.,
New York. for 10 samples and 200 testimonials.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

New Mistress-"Now,B Bridget, when l
have company / shall expect you to stay
out of the room
Bridget-'Yis. mum, an DIN expect
the same Of you. "--Tit-Bits.
-:O:-
It is said that Prof Blackie often told
this anecdote ION himself.'' This genial
old professor used to form a very pictur-
esque feature in the Edinburgh streets.
He was wiry old patriarch. with hand
some features and hair falling in ringlets
about his shoulders; no one who had
seen him could possibly forget him. One
day he was accosted by very dirty little
bootblack with his: ''Shine your boots,
sir?' The professor was impressed by
the flthiness of the boys face.
Il don't want shine, my iad,' said
he. But if you'll go and wash your face
I'll give you sixpence."
"a RIGHT, SIR was the lads reply.
Then he went over to neighboring foun-
tain and made his additions. Returning,
he held out his hand for the money.
well, my lad said the professor,
you have earned your sixpence. Here
it is
Il dinna want it." returned the boy,
with lordly air. Eye can keep it and
get yer hair cut.
NILS. 0Ieen NWuO lu1HhS OIL nlrluS)--
'But is the girl honest? Can she be
trusted?'' Mrs. Brown (the girls former
mistress)-"Yo need not be in the least
alarmed. She is perfectly honest All
the time she was with me l never knew
her to take a thing-not even my advice
as to how things should be done."-Judy
Somewhere there's an iceberg
Floating DER the deep:
Somewhere there's a polar bear
Doing off to sleep:
Somewhere there's an Eskimo
With q SnoW-crOWned shack.
And his everyday apparel
Is q seal
SacQue.
Somewhere there's a storm cloud
Gathering on high;
Somewhere there's a snowflake
l gaping from the sky,
AID somewhere there are people
Hot as burning coal,
Wishing that this hemisphere
Were all
pole.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
AWEIGHTING A REPLY.

Two questions are, who pays the freight
When Mac makes trips in royal steight,
a thing he's done quite oft of leight,
And are these junkets on the streight?
Life
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

There is only one sudden death
among women to eight among men.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

There are over seventy miles of tun-
nels cut in the solid rock Of Gibraltar.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

v
the service to his own satisfaction.
Il think | got through the service
without mistake, John?' he remarked
to the old clerk, who was helping him
off with his surplice.
1T was frst-rate, Master Dick, said
the cid man, with enthusiasm. Il don't
know as | ever heard it better done. "
After a pause he added. But the old
parson, he never gives US the evening
service in the morning. Tit
Aunt Broadhead (who has been visit
ing)-"When Abby Stang was married,
over at Kohokus, she tainted dead away
jest before the minister could pronounce
EN- MAJ an wife,
Mrs. Longnecker-''My land: What
happened?'
Aunt Broadhead (dryly)-"Oh, she
come to before the groom could git
away"
The Cincinnati Enquirer says that Il
soiemn-looking Irishman entered a bust
ness house the other day, and, walking
up to one Of the men employed on the
lower floor, asked:
us dhere amy chanst fer mon t get
job av wur-rk here?"
Il don't Know" answered the man ad-
dressed; you'll have to see Mr.. Ho-
BART
An pfwere is hep asked the Irish
man.
up on the second floor,'' was the an
Shall Oh walk up an talk t him?"
queried the seeker for employment.
mo need Of that replied the man.
Just whistle in that tube and he'll speak
to you" pointing at the same time to a
speaking-tube.
The old Irishman walked over to the
tribe and blew a mighty blast in it. Mr..
Hobart heard the whistle, came to the
tube and queried:
What's wanted down there?'
IT'S Oh, Paddy Flynn answered the
Irshman. AR We tn boss?"
Il am replied Mr.. Hobart.
"Well, thin yelled Flynn. ''sthick yer
head out av tn second-story windy
whole Oh sthep out on tn soidewalk. OF
want to talk t yer'
Il don't like Snaggs' idea of joke"
said IIiland.
"No?' replied Halket.
NO, l don't
Tell me about it.
The other night l called to see him.
All right | said, get a bottle with /;
stick in it SO Snaggs went out and
presently returned with a bottle of muci-
lage." -Pittsburg Chronicle-Telegraph
A wildly turbulent peasant was. once
a witness in a trial before Chief Baron
O'Grady, tells the San Francisco Argo-
naut. The counsel, after Fostering him
for some time, put a question to him
which reflected on the witness character
If We AK me that again I'll give We a
kick in the gob.'' was the answer The
counsel appealed to the court, stating
that an answer was necessary to his
clients case. ending up with the query:
What would your lordship advise me
to do?'' If you are resolved to repeat
the question" replied the court, I'D adj
wise you to move little from the wit
-
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

A young Irishman once went to a kind
hearted old squire for recommendation.
An elaborate one was written and read
to him. He took it with thanks but did
not move. whats the matter with it?'
roared the squire. ''Oh. nothin', so"r,''
don't you go?" ''Sure, sorr, | thought On
the stringth of recommind like that
you'd be wantin' to hire me-
The squire's son had just been or
dained, and on the following Sunday he
was to take the morning service in his
native village.
He was young man and very nerv-
GUS. However, he did his best, and re-
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
STOMACH TROUBLES.
GAINESVILLE, Wis, March 3, 1885,

GAINESVILLE, Wis. March 3, 1898.
Enclosed find one dollar for which
please send me three packages of ZaegePs
Swedish Essence of Life. The sample,
used according to your directions, acted
wonderfully in my case. After the sec
ond dose my stomach troubles were at an
end. l shall leave 10 opportunity go by
to highly recommend this excellent med
icine. VIM. BUCHHOLZ.
The great blood
Two Weeks purifier Zaegei's
Treatment Free. of Gu ifa is Hf 30 he
given away free
to readers of this paper. This medicine
cures Rheumatism, Stomach, Liver and
Bowel Complaints, by renaoving disease
germs from the blood. Hundreds of let
tiers like the above on file in our office
are proving this every day. A reward
of 800 Dollars en- Gold will be given to
anyone who can prove that they are not
genuine.
A book telling all about it's wonderful
cures and a free sample, large enough
TO convince Won of its merits will be
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25
Two Weeks
Treatment Free.

mailed to all who write
to N. r. ZAEGEL &
CO., P. O. Box 1913,
Sheboygan, Wisconsin.
A 2-cent stamp should
be enclosed in your let
ter to pay the postage
on this free sample.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-07-25

1t is estimated that one crow will de-
stroy 100000 insects every year.