New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1899-11-15

'"rho St Paul Pioneer Press last week issued
handsomely illustrated number commemorative oi
the ffteth anniversary of its existence tnat was
not only creditabe to It in all ways out also
Illustrated the phenomenal growth in wealth. popu-
Iation and Industry OF the great Northwest, OF
which "The Pioneer Press is so able and Drhiant
a spokesman.
Judge-was the stolen jewelry gold or silver!
Well why don't you answer 1rdoo what silence
PriSOner-Dont you know Juuse "''"N ~
is?-H'egende Bitter
1.-THE right of burial" says The East LONDON
Cburca chronicle" ''n the churchyard of parish
in the north of London is being keenly disputed oy
the rector of the parish. Addressing his cofgFesd
ton on the subject the other Sunday ne "ouhu up
with the following: In fine II you submit u tn'S
outrageous imposition, then In Few years "he
our call 10 rest shall come shall have 10 walk
over five miles to find graves for ourselves ms
If we remember rightly was the distance St Denis
who FRIED his head under his arm, walked on MS
way TO Paris
An lola soldier relates that one day General OTIS
came out on the firing line and ordered tne shoo..
lin iS ali sors of damage TO the insurgents. kept
on shooting Ddnt you hear my eom Wbo a 1e
you?' asked the soldier m General Otis' otis
he'll responded the solder Il Em9T Ea mat ws s the 10
Otis never comes out mere. ana oahs "e"' '''e
gun.-(Kansas City Journal
During the Civil War" says THE Boston Tran
script" .the Law School at Cambridge was pre-
sided over by Professors Parsons, Parker and
Washburn. They were divided In their pontcal
views and each did his best to maintain MS oplh-
len. Professor Parker was one day asked; HOW do
you get along politics at the Law school:
Nicely he answered we are equally divided
But how can that be-? continued the inquirer
There are three of YOU? Easy enough. replied
the professor. Parsons writes on one side and
on the other. and Washburn-he speaks on one side
and votes on the other
I'VE are ready to contribute considerable fund
70 your reelection confidently remarked the
agent of the new electric light company. with the
understanding. of course that you look aiter our
interests when the matter comes up oetore the
Sir exclaimed the Alderman from the 'steenth
this is the first time have been insulsed since
the campaign opened; HoTmer-nro o,S much are you
Premier Seldom Of New-Zealand worried by the
unemployed and the decreasing birth rate. has an
nounced that If any man out of employment VIII
bind himself to marry inside Of six months he the
Premer) will find him immediate work
Frederick Fitz-Maurce let me pass!'
Genevleve gestured imperiously; but the villain
and fall back before the whitening glance of any
young person who says pass instead OF pans!
girl paled For besides being S tor from
manager-(Detroit Journal
itar" A Young man left small package at the
home of a young woman upon whom he was maxi
ing his first call. She wrote him a note telling
him he had left It. He wrote her telling her
IL was some edbles. and that she might appropri-
ate it to her own She wrote again to ex-
press Ter appreciation. He replied TO express mis-
appreciation of her appreciation She retaliated
with an expression Of her appreciation Of his APP
probation OF her appreciation. At the present
time the expression of appreciation Is going for
ward in arithmetcal progression as the letters
multiply and as they contain something a little
more serious in its nature there promises TO be
some very interesting complications resulting from
a correspondence presumably for the expression
Of appreciation.
The First Society Of Spirltualiss Of Syracuse
held a meeting at Empire Hall. in that city; on
Sunday evening. Among others present were Mrs;
took number Of questions from the audience and
viii my wife recover from her severe plness?"
'As YOU have no wife she will not recover" was
Another question was. What is the matter with
my wife the last few days? -, ..,..
cause as she followed you last Thursday night"
Utica Observer.
1.-THE Philadelphia Record tells about a relic
factory hidden away in a cump OF trees
Gettysburg. The value OF this years production
will be $4,000 and II consists OF odd bullets
pieces OF bone and sabretasches all Of course, OF
very ancient and worn appearance These are
the cheaper products. There are. besides i'm the
finer and more costly lines Testaments bored
through by bullets. love letters burned by powder
and stained dark with blood skulls with big leaden
balls lodged neatly in the eye sockets the Jaw
and the full uniforms. properly punctured and
bloodstained. of all the officers slain upon the bat
tiefed. The factory makes nothing in advance,
thus avoiding overstockipg. II only runs
ders and by night the customers call for their
goods They the nnkeepers. the grocers the
saloonkeepers. bakers and real estate men OF the
town. I'd whenever II is moonlight they may be
seen distributing the rare relics cautiously and
judlclousy the Held Visitors there now are
more numerous than they used to be- 1t Is no
longer usual to poke about all day without I'M
earthng so much as a single bullet and tourists
appreciate this change"
The new housemaid who had answered the ring
OF the postman glanced at the wrapper OF the mag
azinc. on which was inscribed. James Smith
MGhoo. and returned Il TO the man In the gray
uniform with the remark That isn't for us The
name OF the people who live here is Smith
That's al, right he said handing II back well
put II isn't all right Don't you suppose | know
n hs name M Of this family This "a for somebody
how ! got my job You can read well enough 10
see that The first part OF that name is James
% March @ the ms IT'S pSd IN the he MGhoo
you'd better take H. You're a nice looking girl
mmSEnins See you again tomorrow "-(chicSSSoo