The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1899-10-14
JUSTICE JOHN
HAS MANY KIN
Proved 10 be a Direct Descendant Of
CharIemagne.
CHAMPION STREET CLEANER.
Walter Jenkins, a Good-Looking
Young Man, Charged With Steal
ing Clothes-Ordcr In The
aires and Street Cars.
CHAMPION STREET CLEANER.

he came down town town this morning,
and IL was easy to see that he had some
thing on is mind.
lie had been taught by forefathers that
he came from good old English stock but
81 all the people who are anxious to claim
kin with him are his relatives, he belongs
10 a very large and influential family.
A South Carolinian proved TO him con-
clusively in a letter, that he belonged 10
his family and was direct descendant
81 Chnrlemague.
A New Englander tells him that ne Is
OF puritan descent and traces his gen.
ealogv beyond dispute. An enthusiastic
Philadelphia Irishman shows by facts or
unbroken connection that he Is fuI
bloosed lrishman.
He is much puzzled to know where
he's at" He however has the consolation
that no one has yet taken him for a
Boer or a Spaniard.
BROOM HIS SCEPTRE.
Justice John IS the greatest street clean
or OF the century. lie used broom Tor
81 court sceptre yesterday and OBJ
siructionists to the city thoroughfares mad
as well take warning or be swept INTO
noihingness.
A brave officer Of the First Station. In
the dead hour Of the night stealthhy
crept up on seventeen tons Of junk iron
on a street parrellel 20 Main. and not lar
from the canal dock. which. for many
years had eluded the lynx-eyed guard
fans Of the law. and having surrounded
his quarry so that Il could not escape be-
fore morning. reported il at the station
as the worst scrap he had seen for
long time.
This iron had lain around the street do
ine nothing for It's OWN support for years,
and now when iron Is being worked all
over the country this iron. which seems
70 have lost cast. wrought no good TO ae
community
IL was charged with being a common
vagrant and given three days to get off
the face of the earth.
RECOGNIZED MERIT.
The officer who made the report was
invited 10 stand up on the desk beside the
Great Regulator with a newspaper under
his No L. brogans so as not to scratch
the oil finish OF the handsome furniture
while the Great Regulator patted Him on
the back and delivered 10 him the joint
thanks Of the American Mechanics and
the National Iron MOulders Union.
The great eclat that surrounded this
episode showed that the officer who fer
reted out this serious obstruction to the
citys thorouehfare was ranked with
Columbus. Livingstone. DR.. W. II. Tay-
Tor and other great discoverers.
The field Of research in this new line Of
discovery is very large in Richmond, and
the reputation gained by this noble officer
may cause others TO seek fame and also
become public benefactors.
A THEATRE PARTY.
Good order in theatres and street-cars
was the text for a pony lecture by the
Great Regulator.
A party of young men had taken so
cial glass. 1t became lonesome and they
gave IL company at the next still-hou9e
reached The sociability was OF a high
order by the time they reached the
theatre.
one of them lit a cigar and an usher
told him 10 put it out They were noisy
and a policeman reinforced the usher
order. The friend OF the smoker. accord
.ug % The usher. took II up and chewed
the rag" and was arrested
The offence was more of the boisterous
than disorderly character. The Great
Dispenser announced that $40 was his
smallest fine for disorder in theatres and
street cars. but discharged the young
men with warning.
Walter jenkins, young man or good
dress md appearance. and Of g0t family,
was charged with being suspicious
character and of stealing a coat and vest
from T. X Tennel. who boarded In the
same house with him.
NAME on THE CLOTHES.
jenkins pawned the clothes. They
had the name of Fennel on them, but ne
claimed that Mr. st. John, Jr., gave them
10 him &c pawn and that he did not know
whose they were.
The case was continued TO hear the
evidence Of ST. John. whom he sought TO
inplicate in the crime
George T. Harrison who was under
compact with the Great Dispenser to the
effect that If George Il. came before him
for drunkenness again I'm sixty days,
George T.. should Join the chain gang
for 20 days.
The Great Dispenser and not Geo. = was
the one To recall the agreement Geo. y.
would dissemble and have a lapse Of
memory. hut the Great Dispenser nail
cd him with superior recollection and
made his promise good.
OPINIONS OF HIS OWN.
John Finegan was intoxicated and per-
sisted on forcing his opinions IN regard 10
imperialism. and the Transvaal war on
people who were only interested IN the
question OF Increased gas bills. and how
they are going 10 pay their state taxes
next month.
He was charged with being drunk and
interfering with people on tho street.
n cost him him $3.50 and the p,lce %
ride IN the police coupe and some other
small trimmings.
Martha Mayo. colored, was promenad-
ing the streets after 10 o'clock. She sad
she was only going TO a girls home
after cape. Fined 81 for going too
late"
Edmonla Johnson colored, was ehsrg-
I'd with disorder on the streets. She said
she was only going u Jerry ORouke's.
Fined 80 20 "for going
And then the Great DISPENSER slappeA
the lids OF the docket book together tin
4, popped like cannon cracker hol-
Tered "jovrn cote till y o'clock and
skipped IKE "A Central school Kid at re-
cess time
Al ~ o'clock whom Court convened
brain no disposed Of rs civil Cases.
Sunday School Rally.
C.h.of raflv Will he he'd AT