The Bellefontaine Republican. [volume] (Bellefontaine, Logan County, Ohio) 1855-1905, 1899-02-28
JONES' UNFORTUNATE
JOKE
BY MATE PALMER.


ZONES declared women had no sense
ii of humor-couldn't see a joke un-
less it was labeled, and wouldn't put
themselves out to reach serious in
depreciation of the airiest jest.
His wife thought such jokes as his
would hardly be recognized if they
were labeled and said clumsy prevari-
cation was a long way from a wit
ticism anyway, and man of refined
sensibility wouldn't play practical
Jokes on his own wife.
Then Jones grew very angry. 1t
isn't pleasant to be misunderstood and
maligned, and to have ones innocent
pleasantries and good-natured fun
dragged in the mire of condemnation
and dubbed falsehoods.
He said cruel things calculated to
rankle for a long time in the feminine
heart, If by chance it didn't perma-
pently ruin the domestic harmony of
the establishment, and his wife took
them all in dead earnest. They
wouldn't have more weight if they
had been deliberately planned six
months in advance.
She knew she was heartbroken and
she assumed an injuredinnocnce
manner which she intended should be
deeply pathetic, but which was really
very ludicrous and strongly suggestive
lof a fit of the sulks. She was bound
to make the punishment fit the crime
and determined that only the most
.abject apology should ever bring
her off Of her stills.
She performed her various house
hold duties with the utmost precision.
She prepared delicacies of which he
was specially fond, thus heaping Goals
of fire on his weary head, and then
sat like a wooden woman while they
were being served.
But posing as a martyr is difficult
task. Few women can endure the
tension longer than a week. Mrs
Jones kept it up five days. and then
her dearest friend found her, like
Niobe, dissolved in tears.
She had INDUCED in a few surrepti.
tious crying spells at different times
before, but, strong in her determine
tion to conquer, she had been able to
choke back all such indications OF
weakness and present heroic appear
ance when the enemy arrived. But
victory seemed as remote as ever and
her nerves appeared to be dancing q
perpetual cancan.
She feared she was on the verge
Ct total collapse, mental as well as
physical, and visions of detention hos.
pitals mingled with the shadowy phan.
toms of hysteria.
Her friend was astounded to find heI
in such state of grief. Jones had
always been considered a model hus
band; it couldn't be his fault, and nc
one was dead or seriously i'll. That
much she managed to gather between
the sobbing and moaning. But it was
some time before the poor sufferer was
sufficiently quieted to give coherent
idea of the cause of all her woe.
1t appeared that a few weeks be
fore, her husband had told her thai
some old friends of his had moved tc
Chicago. He was delighted because
they had come, for he was very font
of them, but sorry he had not known il
st ason to get them into their neigh
borhood. She had asked where they
did live and he said: "Away out OF
Minute. street beyond Jackson park,
and told her she must 60 and call or
them as soon as possible, and the1
fearing she might forget the number
he had written it down for her, =
Minute street.
Two or three weeks went by before
she could spare the time, and it wa.
cold, uncomfortable day when she
finally started to make the visit. L
didn't occur to her to ask any ques
tions. Her husband had said that they
were way out beyond Jackson park
So she took a Cottage Grove avenue
car and when they got out in that
neighborhood she told the conductor
to let her off at Minute street. HI
asked her over three times and theI
said she must be mistaken in the name
he had never heard of such a street
But he was a new man on the route
and there might be such astreet.
She was sure she had gone fa1
enough, so she got off and walked ant
i studied the names on the lamp posts
| She asked small boy and he gigglet
and said it was ''just up yonder."
She went there and the woman she
| met on the corner never heard of sucl
| street and had lived on the Soutf
| side ten years.
She made a grand detour, taking II
numerous streets in every direction
| and then it began to grow dark, and