The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-01-22
TOO FRESH "
A ~Drummer's Experience in P~ersonating n
Railroads General Manager.

A Drummer's Experience in Personating n
Railroads General Manager.
There is a slang expression about being
too fresh" said the drummer. as he lighted his
cigar. Il have adopted that expression and
written 1t at the head ofevery page of my note
book. so that 1t will be constantly before me.
Last fall l changed cars at a little junction
in the western part of the State. 1t is a dreary
spot, and the trains never connect within three
hours Of each other. Finding time hanging
heavily on my hands ] wandered over to an
orchard near by. where there was some tempt
ing looking fruit. | was so busily engaged in
throwing stones al a MISUNDERSTANDING apple in
the top of one of the trees that | did not notice
an old farmer bearing down whereI was with
blood in his eye. When l discovered him it was
too late to fee. so | concluded to face 1t out.
Fine orchard you've got here said I.
opening on him before he had a chance to get
in the first word. 1t will be a pity to spoil it
by running a railroad through it,
Hay 2 said he.
g" remarked said I. that It will be a pity
to spoil such a fine orchard by running a rail-
road through it. ! am the general manager OF
this road. and | have been looking It over with
a view OF strengthening out some of the kinks.
/ have about concluded to run the road through
your, orchard and thus get rid of the bad curve
=" This disarmed the old man at once and
placed him in a more conciliatory mood.
come W. ter the house an',we,'n talk it over
Thought the old man had something in the
line of wet goods that he wanted me to sample
In the hope that / might nut me in good humor
aud save his orchard. | looked at, my watch
and seeing that | had nlenty Of time | CON
Guided TO carry on the Joke. so / followed him
up to the house.
the old man threw the door omen and invited
me to inspect a fine lot of hams that he had in
side. ! stepped In the doorway, aud az | did so
side upon my hands and knees, Before | could
recover myself he had thrown the doorshut and
locked II.
"'General manager,\ he YEP he bawled
through "A crack in the door.
"l didn't think il wise to deny It. SOL shout.
ed back that ! was, and moreover that ] would
take pains to see that the railroad ran straight
~ Wi. we'll talk about that later said he.
,Momber that thar bill that | sent " fer killin'
Itruth'ully replied that / didn't,
go Wul,' said he, youll stay whore ye ar till
ye do. I've got 70 les, whore ! want We. anti
go don't pay me that thar fifteen dollars that
ye owe me fer KILN them sheep the railroad
is goIn Ter be short one general manager sFs7
| tried e. explain the true situation. but he
refused to listeni i was fifteen dollars or stay
old man / heard my train whistle Il mile or so
off. ] had an important engagement to meet,
aud | simply had TO catch that train. so | poked
fifteen dollars through the crack,
The old man unlocked the door aid ! was
stepping out when he suddenly threw his
weight against II,
What for| | howled az | heard my train
getting nearer and nearer
va " obontP tSs , ;Ss stf%P7 that l wasted writin'
| poked out 50 cents more AM legged 1t for my