Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1899-03-18
Its a mousse she volunteered,


VIII SnlVer OF 1rlPnu.
Now, that was just like a woman,
but didn't dare tell Constance so-un-
disturbed by yowling cats, yet thrown
into a fright over a sound that it took
me 10 minutes to hear and 10 minutes
more to locate. lit the gas and started
on a search for the mouse.
Then it was that Constance forged to
the front as a military dictator. She
could give Shafter miles and then beat
him. Huddled up i'll the middle of the
bed she conducted the campaign, leav-
ing me to go to the front and get into
the hot of battle. Spaniards are like
getting money from home i'll comparison
to catching mouse.
"Oh, he's eating up that edition dc
luxe of the Three Musketeers' that you
gave me when we were engaged"
squealed Constance.
Now as that edition de luxe she men,
toned consists of two volumes that
weigh about three pounds each, and as
there is arsenic in the green binding, l
didn't worry about it, but l went to the
bOokshelves, pulled back the curtains,
gave shove or two on the bottom shelf
and out jumped one of the most fero-
CiOus mice | ever saw. ! jumped to
meet him, and we rolled over on the
floor together, but in the melee he es-
capped. Constance says | was trying to
get away from the little beast. Well, if
l was didn't succeed, for it was all
could do to keep from screaming when
i'll its reciprocated excitement it touch
ed me with at least two dozen cold,
scratchy little feet.
l was starting back for headquarters
when Constance began to execute a
series of fantastic gestures. She waved
her arms appealingly and pointed at
the curtain over the door to her writing
room. Then she pointed at the mantel-
piece. l promptly turned out the gas
and secured my pistol.
"Oh, Mr.. Bine! Why can't you IN
derstand?" she finally said.
Now 1 could have said something
cruel there, but refrained. l was not
reared on Comanche reservation, and
have no Apache blood in me. lit the
gas again, disarmed myself, secured the
broom my wife had gesticulated at and
ambushed myself behind the foot of the
bed, to watch for any commotion that
might indicate the whereabouts of the
some tlimsy stuff-crinoline or Isle
thread silk-began to flutter again.
"Deploy," said Constance.
"You don't deplore this half as much
as l do, l said, perhaps little snap
pishly. The clock was striking /.
"That is a military phrase" said
Constance haughtily. 'Enfilade him, )"
she added aggravatingly. 1t was plain
Constance was trying to enrage me.
But l was superior to her efforts-that
is, until she made her next remark. In
a rush of desperate determination, feel
ing that was sure to get that mouse,
l charged on the curtain and hit several
sounding whacks.
Constance said that | should have put
on my slippers before l began to prowl
around after the mouse. AT any rate,
could not contain my Anglo-Saxon feel
ings when that mouse jumped graceful
ly out of the curtain and scampered
across my feet. When he touched my
left foot, | jerked it up, and when he
touched my right foot almost at the
same moment lifted that, and as a re-
suit of this ambipedal movement 1
went down on the floor in a heap.
suppose it must have been funny-very
funny-for Constance, forgetting her
fright, rejecting all sentiments of graft
tude, fairly SCI canned at me between
bursts of hysterical laughter, "Foiled.
''It is just as well that l do not re-
member what retorted. Constance says
she will try to forget it. 1t didn't take
me long to get back to bed, and l had
very little to say. 1t is likely l was
little ashamed of myself. But here is a
point would like to have some light
thrown on-was Constance a humorist
or merely a woman when she said to
me at breakfast, "Mr. Bine, we would
have had no trouble at all if one of those
cats had been in the room?"
And when | said, Eyes, it would
have stopped the yowling outside" she
laughed until Alice and Joseph stared
at her in amazement
l wonder if she meant that the cat
would have caught the mouse? Never
theless | am now the proud possessor of
mOusetrap and am merely awaiting
developments. Exchange.