The record-union., 1899-08-21
Pa is Almost Convicted.

the Time when you're out mites by jist
ridin' Around on your Wheel"
Them was the Words nav Spoke to
paw when He Come Back from putin
His Bisickle in the Basemunt the other
mite, and you could tell She ment it by
the way she spoke.
Paw wiped about Half pint Of Hon
est Sweet offn His Brow with His fore
finger and Let it Trickle Down on the
Steps. I mean the SWEET Then He
says:
What's putt That Fool idee into
your Hed?"
II Don't Beleave ennybuddy Would
Be foolish enuf," NAV Says, "to Go out
Every mite and Ride steddy fer fore
Hours Like You Do. / Bet you Just
go Somewhares and Set around and
mebby Git into Bad cumpny."
THAT made paw purity mad and He
says Kind of Sneerin:
when you amt around to Suspicion
innosunt people I'll Be Ded Sure Of
One thing"
What's That?" NAV asst.
you'll Be the Vicktum of Foul play
or Else you'll Have a Good Deal more
Common Sentz than you got now,' paw
anserd.
"They amt no use Tryin to turn it
off That way" NAV says. "Peeple al
ways GIFTS mad When Thay are Found
Out"
Well" paw Holered, you Got a
Chanct to Find Out Whether tell the
Truth or not. I got a Siclometer on my
wheel. That'll sho Whether just Set
around Somewhares or not"
YES" NAV says, land / Looked at
it This Evenin Before you Started Out,
Too, and I no jist How menny miles
They was registered on it."
So the next mornin Paw Fergot all
| about it and Went to work, and me and
| the pupp and Little Albert went Down
in the Basemunt after Breakfast and
Turned paws Wheel Upside Down and
Begin Spinner the front one Back
werds. First 1 would Give it Whurl
and Then Little Albert would Spin it,
and the pupp would jump up and
Down and Stick his Ears eorrerd and
| Try to Bite the Spoox. 1t was Crate
Fun. Then we Set it Back like we
| found it and when paw come Home
NAV and me and the pupp and Little
Albert was Settin on the porch and !
says:
Nav, thot you was Coin to Look
at paws Bisickle to See How fur He
rode Last nite.'
Yes paw Says. ST want you to
| See What a Blame Goose you made Of
yourself
SO He went and Got the Wheel out
and Brot it around and pointed at the
| Siclometer and says:
"Thare, now, see whether You Think
| / lie er not
Nav bent over and then She Gave
paw a Look what I'd Halt to Have en-
nybuddy Fire at me.
"You rode jest a Half mile Last
nite,' says NAV.
| Paw He looked and Says:
| ooh, they's something the matter
| With the Blame Thing
'Spin it awhile I says, "and See.'
] So paw Give the Wheal a Whurl and
! the Siclometer went all rite.
| Hen Moffett," NAV Says Beginnin
| to Weap, look at Them two innosunt
| Children Settin Thare! You've Broke
| up our HAPPY Home
Then She Cuvered up Her Fais with
Her hands and paw looked at me and
! the pupp anu LlllIC tAlDGIl 81 Jd1 lilS5
Sumthin Seemed to Crawl up into my
! throte and the Teers Come into my
! eyes and little Albert He Blubbered and
Said He'd Be Good Boy and never Do
| it agin if paw woundnt punish Him and
Then He Up and Told the Hole Blame
| Bizness.
l Fell over the Railin When paw
come up the steps and He Tramped on
| the Pupps Tale and the pupp Yelled
Like if it Was Gittin Killed and nav
| Screened Becoz She Thot I was Grip
pied for Life, and Everybuddy around
! Thare come a-runnin. I purtended !
| coulden't Hardly walk and That my
Back was Hurt, So They Helped me in
the House and NAV Brot my Supper up
/ to me in Bed.
| | diden't Hardly sleep all mite. I was
SO Trade paw intent Be Over His mad
BY morning. It's turrable to Have a
/ City Conscience. GEORGES. E
Kiser, in Chicago Times Herald.