davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
A Fighting Snake.

Don't wake up moccasin," seen;s
to be the moral of an experience u lder-
gone by southern correspondent of
the Forest and Stream while ish1ng
one day in bayou of the Pearl river
He says:
my end of the boat had turned to-
ward the nearest bank, which was dis
tant about thirty feet, and lying asleep
on a log at the waters edge l noticed
a moccasin of very fair proportions.
Signaling to my companion, I point
ed to the snake, that he might hold the
boat steady while tried shot at it
with small pocket pistol-a twenty
two caliber-that we always carried on
our trips, ard in the use of which con-
slant practice had made me very ex-
pert. The snakes head was not visi-
BILE, so I concluded to try shot at the
thickest part Of the body, which show
ed clear on the highest part of the log,
presenting fair mark that could hit
nine times in ten.
AS fired, the boat must have moved
slightly, for my shot struck one-half
inch lower than intended. Instead CT
going through the snakes body it welt
between it and the log, and must have
felt very much like hot iron, to Judge
by his actions.
After quick shiver and full-length
squirm, he began to bow his back and
spit like an angry cat.
This was so unusual that it amused
us very much, and we sat laughing
heartily for moment or two, expect
ing every instant that the snake would
take to the water and disappear.
Suddenly the snake swung round,
with it's head stretched in our direc-
ton and plunged into the water, but
did not disappear. Threshing through
| the water like mad, he made straight
for me with an air of business that
cured my attack of laughter PROMPTLY
and effectually.
Straight on he came until he was bu..
few feet from me as sat in the boat
| and then recovered my powers of lC.
comotion, and most ingloriously fed.
There was no choice of routes. so
| straight down the long, slender boat
dashed toward the end my companion
occupied, clearing the middle seat with
jump that nearly drove the bottom
| out.
| My companion had started up with
startled cry to Look QUIT" and had
grasped a. heavy paddle lying in the
bottom of the boat; but seeing me
bearing down On him in wild fight
that was certain to carry us both over
the end of the boat into twenty feet Of
water he dropped the paddle. stooned
| low and caught me with an approyfd
football tackle-hold just above the
knees, and together we fell with q
crash against the end seat, nv head
striking with such force that I was
| rendered almost unconscious.
Springing to his feet, my friend
snatched up the paddle and ran to
the end of the boat from which I had
fled, and found the snake still in MR.
suit, although the boat had move1
some distance from the impetus given
by the sudden arresAng of my fight.
Not until he had received blow thai
almost disabled him did that pugna-
cious serpent retire from the attack
He then swan back to the bank ard
crawled out on the very log on which
! we had first seen him
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
Kttty's Picture,

ntILy6 fIcCure.
/ took my kitty yesterday
To have her picture made:
They wanted me to hold her still,
Because she was afraid.
Il never have my picture took,
Because I always cry
When it begins to stare at me,
That awful Cameras eye.)
= My kitty wiggled all about
And stood upon her head,
And I forgot the Camera
Until-"All done! they said.
But when the picture came it was
The queerest thing-you see,
The kitty didn't show at all
The picture was Of me!
e.. .. -Abbie Farwell Brown.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
A Triumph of DUTY.

Men," said Sir Colin Campbell, as
chat chin red line" now historic. .pre-
pared to receive the Russian cavalry,
"men. where you fall you must lie un-
til the band corps picks you up. If
any man leaves the ranks to help a
wounded comrade, I'll post his name
on the parish church" The men were
Highlanders, and posting on the
church door meant disgrace through
out the parish. Every laddie and las
sic would turn from a posted" soldier.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
Little Hunlky Dory.

Little Hunky Dory.
There was once a little boy,
And his name was Hunky Dory,
And he used to ask his mother
Every night to tell a story!
Then she'd pretend to shiver,
And to shake, with awful fear,
And she's say: 'Oh, dear, I never
Told story, Hunky, dear!"
Then Hunky used to ponder
On his little mothers knee;
And then he'd say: "a truly one,
Dear mother, tell to me-!
John Ernest Mccain.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
The Natural Question.

Teacher-Once upon a.. time there
were two rich men, one of whom made
his fortune by honest industry, while
the other made his by fraud. Now
which Of these two men would Won
prefer to be? Tommy (after a. I NJ,
ment,s zhesitation)- Which made the
most? ~Es..,. *-r., 's-@ s 80 ~, -
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
!, The Exact Difference

The, pupils in school were asked
to give in writing the difference he
tween a biped and a quadruped one.
boy gave the following: "A biped has
two legs and a quadruped has four.
legs; therefore the difference between
a biped and a quadruped is two leps !.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
No Doubt About 1t.

-z"Colonel, you swear positively that
your regiment never received a pound
of embalmed beef in Cuba. How is it
possible for you to- be so absolutely
>certain?" Because my regiment new
er got farther than Tampa, SIR
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
FAMOUS FOLK.

And the Troubles They Give Their
Doctors.
The pope is becoming very disobe-
dent. Though DR.. Lapponi, the papal
physician, recently insisted that his
holiness was not to leave his bed, and
not to receive anyone, the energetic
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
All About the Peach Crop.

Atlanta Journal: There is yet hope
that we may have another great peach
crop this year. Without an abundant
supply of Georgia peaches, the pleas
ure of life is distinctly decreased for
millions Of the people Of this coun-
trxv
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
Els Acknowledgement.

on admit" said the judge, severe
ly, 'tthat you married these two Wom-
en-" Il did, said the unabashed big
amist. They are my better two
fhirds."' 81 ;z= 1.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
Getting Even.

It is not always easy to punish a
Door without losing ones temper, but
London paper tells how a boat-load
of sailors, on shore-leave from man
'of-war, did it good-naturedly and
without violence.
AS they journeyed up the roadway
into the Cornish village, a gentleman's
Waggonette passed. One of the tars
thoughtlessly jumped on the step be-
hind
Git orr there! shouted the coach
man. and being a churlish sort of fell
low, he dashed the sailor viciously
across the face with his whip. That
was enough.
In an instant the other eleven blues
had closed round and stopped the
trap, the boatswain's mate in COM
mand. "'Tention!" cried he, and ten
ton there was. "Dismount the gunv'
he shouted, and it seemed as if every
bluejacket carried a whole carpenters
OlJtfjt .....- .
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

In three minutes they had taken the
~wag gonette into one hundred and sew
~enty-two pieces, and that without so
much as scratching one bit of paint or
losing a solitary screw. They laid
them all out neatly on the stony road,
and the boatswain's mate, after in
specting the job, cried, Good. Dis
miss"
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
Breakfast Table Land.

breakfast Table Land.
In all the world of Food-and-Drink
There lives no Prince like Bobolink,
None half so good and fair.
He reigns in Breakfast-table-land, .
Which spreads away on either hand !
Beyond the willow chair. H. ;,
Upon the right, near Orangeville, Z
There rises famous Muffin Hill;
And just a bit beyond 49,
The glistening Sugar Rocks are piled,
A place beloved by. every child: :. :,
And close by New~Milk Pond. .-..-, ~
The Sweet-Cream Falls slip smoothly
And join the Coffee Springs, all brown
And hot as hot can be.
And. there's the town of Johnny Cake,
Old Doughnut Mountain, Syrup Lake,
And pleasant Pancake Lea.
Each morning to his willow throne
The prince ascends, and in a tone
That makes his subjects quake
He says: Good morning, every one,
IL you don't mind, I'll start upon
The town of Johnny Cake!
He eats the hills; he drinks the creeks:
He stuffs whole mountains in his
cheeks!
He likes the trees and sand:
And when at last the Prince gets
down
There's scarcely left a. stream or town
In Breakfast ble-land!~
Willard Keyes.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

WedlOck rhymes with deadlock. Yo
can draw your own inference.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
FOR BOYS AND GIRLS.
SOME GOOD STORIES FOR OUR
JUNIOR READERS.

lsreak fast-Table-Lan Youthful Pos
simist-A Triumph of Duty-Getting
Even-Kitty's Yictnre-Little Hunky
Dory.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

It's poor contortionist that cam
make both ends meet.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

WHIT Coughs and Colds Cured Quick
WIFE Or. Seth Arnold's Cough Killer All Druggists
and Country Stores. 25c. bottle,
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

Only two rulers Of Russia since Pc.
ter the Great have died a natural
death-Catherine II. and Alexander
ILL.,, the father Of the present car
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
Comment.

congressman Talkington says the
question Of expansion demands serious
consideration
"Oh, well, he always is on the
fence. ''-Puck.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

When person is down in the world,
an ounce Of help is better than
ponnd of preaching.-BulWer
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

FITS PermanertlyCured. Motifs or nervousness aftes
1rst days use of DR.. Hines Great Nerve Restorer
Send for FREE $500 trial bottle and treatise
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
A Good MRf'oh

A Good Match.
''The doctor and his wife seem to be
we'll mated"
'eThink SOP
eyes. People call him a quack and
he calls her 'Ducky.' "-Philadelphia
Bulletin.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

To be honest, as this world goes, is
to be one man picked out of ten thou
nd.-Shakespeare.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

Provision is the foundation of hospi-
tally and thrift the fuel Of magniti-
cence.-Sir P. Sidney.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
Depression.

Il suppose Washington will seem
rather dull after we are gomez re-
marked the statesman.
ooh, don't know" sal dthe amiable
lady with whom he boards. "Of
course, it will take some time to forget
all these debates. and yeas and nays,
and such. But it won't be more than
a week or two before we begin to liven
up a bit. Washington Star
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20

Are You Using Aliens Foot-Ease7
It is the only cure for Swollen,
Smarting, Burning, Sweating Feet,
Corns and Bunions. Ask for Aliens
Foot-Ease, a powder to be shaken into
the shoes. At all Druggists and Shoe
Stores, Csc. Samples sent FREE. Ad-
dress, Allen S. Olmsted, Leroy, N. Y.
The Cook County herald. [volume] (Grand Marais, Minn.) 1893-1909, 1899-05-20
EALTH and beauty the glories Of perfect woman
hood ,5 T
= Women who suffer constantly with weakness peculiar
cannot retain beauty. of

pretty features anu IUuHueu 10TH IS
q duty women owe to themselves.
The mark of excessive monthly suf-
ering is a familiar one in the faces of
young American women.
Don't wait, young women, until
your good looks are gone past recall.
Consult Mrs. Pinkham at the out
start. Write to her at Lynn, Mass.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1899-02-17
POLAND AGAIN.

THE powers OF northern Europe COM
bined to crush and partition Poland. II
was because the Poles within their do
minions gave TO another government n
higher allegiance than they would give
10 the ear or the kaiser"
That was the assertion Of the anti
Mormon" professor OF history on
Tuesday. February II. which the Dea-
orct News showed was entirely incor-
rect.
For many centuries Poland gave
her qualified allegiance to Prussia. for
200 years she had held Russia as an
enemy"
This IL from the same high authority.
In attempted explanation three days
later. We are not quite sure that there
Il any dIncovcrabie sense IN the words
quoted. but II seems TO be this. that the
Poles gave ''quaiihcd allegiance" TO
Prussia and higher allegiance to
Russia. The Inference il that there
fore Prussia and Russia combined with
that other power OF northern Europe"
which happens TO be situated In the
south. Austria. and they divided Po-
land.
After this lucid explanation there can
be no doubt that tho historian has
studied the history OF Poland With
enough care 10 be able 10 trace the
causes" OF her sad fate. that IL. n we
take his own word for Il. lie says
further;
For 700 years she Poland had held
Russia MS an enemy"
Indeed What about the coalition
between Russia. Poland and Denmark
against the youthful king. Charles XIII
Too had that the histories with which
people have been familiar since their
school days should be 70 sadly In need
~ revision. And how fortunate that
such luminous historian rhould now
nrisci However. ms long az our anti
Mormon contemporary lives. Poles
may checrfully sing the old refrain;
"Noch lat Pollen nloht yorlorcn." uo-
land II not yet lost)
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1899-02-17

The main object In exposing lncom-
petent administration. such M made
possible the treatment Of the American
soldiers In Cuba and Puerto Rico IN 10
prevent "A recurrence ~ IT, 10 white
wash the guilty parties by either silence
or a bogus investigation N 10 invite n
repetition on much larger scale;
hence. we hear OF bad beef being
shipped 20 cuba at this very moment.
There " another reason for getting az
tho truth and driving the guilty parties
from public llfe The United States ~
not out Of the woods, II may yet have
trouble both In cuba ana the Philip
pines The army bill, which passed the
House few days ago, calls Tor 100000
men. II II becomes generally known
that an incompetent secretary still has
II In his power To make the lives OF the
soldiers miserable, and subject them
TO disease ana death from improper
food, viii II be an easy matter TO enlist
lOO,0 900 men, or even 10000? This IN a
point of view that has not occurred 10
those who blame General Miles for too
much zeal?
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1899-02-17
THE DEATH OF pAuRE.

n France. ~ has been supposed. II
gradually drifting towards IA rcvoiu-
ton. the sudden death OF President
faurc may possibly accelerate the
movement. liut the probability II that
he tragic event, coming M Unexpected
~. has found the opponents Of tho Re-
public unprepared Tor any decisive step.
and that before their forces can be
rallied the vacant place VIII be nlled
by some one. perhaps oven better quail.
led for the position than was the de-
parted French executive. This Ii 10
Do hoped. at least, for the sake Of
France herself and for the cause of
popular government In Europe. The
iownfall Of republican institutions In
hat country could not. from an Amer
can point OF view. be regarded other
Nise than az n calamity 10 Europe.
President Faure was u comparatively
young man. Through his own efforts
no acquired education. wealth and hon
Dr.; he rose from the ranks of the COM
mon people 10 the exalted position he
occupied at the time Of his death Hut
he mental strain he has been subject
"a 90 lately proved too much for him,
Uneasy lies the head that wears the
crown" aud heavy have been tho
burdens upon tho men chosen To stand
AZ the head Of the French republic.
The suspense created by the vacancy
VIII not be long. - new president will
De chosen Immediately, II the proyl-
sions OF the constitution are carried
out, and until the selection Is made
he situation In France win be watched
with Intense interest.
The latest news IL that the question
81 a successor 10 NJ Faure az president
Of the French republic II TO be settled
tomorrow. Saturday. the hour Of bal
loting being fixed for / ., m. Already
the leftists have nominated NJ. Loubet.
and claim that his selection IL assured
Other French political leaders who are
fered presidential possibilities are
NJ. pupuy. present minister Of the in
terior, and NJ, Paul Deschanel.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1899-02-17
PAIRING.

The total vote for senator today was
%. Four members Of the Legislature
were absent. We are Informed that
three Of the adbsentccs were paired.
n that IL correct the total lawful vote
could only be &C. The President Of the
joint assembly Is reported M dcclar-
Ing that those who were present In
person. Notwithstanding they were
paired. would ne counted aS present
and voting. lie subsequently an
n,unccd that he would hold that opin-
lon for revision. Hut II seems that the
voting was counted according TO that
declaration.
The very purpose OF pairing IL TO Sc
euro the balance that Is made by as
many mcmberp who are present alb
staining from voting. as the number
Of those members who are alb
rent and have made tho arrangement.
That has evidently been knocked on
the head by the absuriity OF countlns
the votes Of members who were paired.
The result was not materially affected
by The supplementary proceeding.
but n principle was involved that
might be very important ON some 9th.
or occasion.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1899-02-17

The report of the war board Of inquiry
has been published at last. and. while
II IL phraRed with an exaggerated eau
ton ANA an apparent disposition to
avoid subjects that might be too pain
ful. Il corrOborntes the popular judg-
ment formed long ago--the judgment
that the general administration of the
war department was lacking In energy
and capacity The board finds that the
medical. qunrtermaster's aud adIutant
generals departments We're caught un-
prepared FOR war, ana attributes the
failures IN those departments mainly
10 this fact. II cnmmends EaEan and
virtually doniea Cen. Miles charges
about the "omhalmed beef" In the
main Il N nonconmlttal, lndeelslye and
n marvel OF military proprlcty. None Of
these fncta. however. can obscure the
force OF one statement, which the board
mnlgea with n delicncy ana refinement
OF phrase which should give the report
q high literary value. In the Judgment
~ the commission there was lacking
In the general administration " the
war department during the continuance
~ the war with Spain that complete
grasp " the situation which was es-
sential Ia the highest efficiency ana dis
olpline OF the army"
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1899-02-17
Ban FraneIneo Chronicle.

To the gratlncd surprise Of the coun-
try. which had begun to fear thnt the
Chicago beef combine had really I'm
posed upon the war department In the
matter OF the beef ration, the invchtlga-
ton board declares that the ration was
generally good and was at hand when
needed. AZ TO the latter point the
sweeping statement Ia made that whcr-
ever the troops were ordered the rn-
tiona prescribed by law were On the
transports and NJ the camps with them.
80 far MS We have been able 60 aacer-
tain" says the report. There was but
one occasion. that ~ n day In front OF
Santiago, when the troops were serious
~ short Of rationa. They had been
supplied. but were thrown aside when
the troops went INTO action. the con-
dition OF the roads and the lack OF
transportation prevented prompt re-
Issue" To veteran cnnpalRners who
lived on the country with sherman
between Atlanta and the sea this scar
city OF u single day will appear In tho
light OF the most triiling incident OF
war. although. at the time, the yellow
press wrote II up TO the dignity OF a
national scandal and catastrophe.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1899-02-17
nnoKEN PLEDGES.

In reference tn the charge that Faith
has been broken with the Nation, with
the Gontlles aud with the Mormon
Masses" the Deaerct News challenged
the accuscr to siye the proofs. In pre-
tended reply he rolterntca the state
ment that the Church, the First Prcsi-
dency and all the Apostles. made cor-
tain pledges which he says were that
mo more marriages should be made In
polygamy; also that "hencoforth the
people should be absolutely. politically
free"
Wen, suppose all that for arguments
sake. Is admitted. Does the repetition
Of the alleged pledges prove that they
have been "hroken2" The anu-"Mor-
mon" accuser closes his paragraph IN
answer to the call for proofs In this
way:
The people understand Il, young Utah
especially understands II. ana AN the
Ink that the Shiny cuttlenHh uf the
News can throw out cannot conceal
the dreary facts.
That II. people understand the plodg-
cs and that Is proof they have been
brokenl Ana the Deseret News Is a
"sllmy cuttlensh' FOR intlmating that
any other proof should be required
II N OF no use TO repeat charges. or
10 tell over and over again what In
meant by them, evidence that they are
true IL all that Is asked FOR. and that
the public as well as the News" have
the right 10 demand.
Imagine n prosecuting officer when
asked for proof OF charge made
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1899-02-17

Under the new custom-housc rcguia-
lions every American returning from
abroad IN required to hand In a list Of
everything he has purchased abroad for
his personal use. and u he forgctH n
gC-ccnt toothbrush. or a cheap collar
he IL liable to arrest and line. American
customs regulations have FOR years
been exceptionally haraasing and an
noying. but the latest enactment IL
really tyrannlcai. Public opinion should
be declared against such extremes. II
should not be more difficult for an
American citizen to enter his own coun'
try than II Il for him to pass by the
bars Of the European monarchics. our
government has no right TO prcsuppose
that every American citizen Is u SNUG
glcr and n cheat.