The times., 1899-09-24
PRESS AGENTS ROUND TABLE.


PRESS AGENTS ROUND TABLE.
There IS nothing particularly promising
perhaps. in q Joke nearly = century and
quarter old, and yet one Of the most
lsughsble heard recently in Washington
has all bit reached that age The jest
hss for its authority no less a parsonage
then Charles 3. Hanford, Of the James
Kfd6sr-Hanford triunvirats, who is said TO
have given II 10 2 friend last year over the
nuts aud wine According 10 the actor.
tae premiere Of Richard BrinsIey Sberi-
dams The School for Scandal at the
Drury Lane in London. was attended by
al inconssquential rival named CumbeT-
Iand- This man. who had constructedseveral
pretsnH0us works, engaged seats and
brnaghr with him g family Of children. The
little ones rozred throughout the PERFORM
aaee greatly 10 the disgust Of their jeaI-
Gus parent. who admonishsd them severely
Keep quiet. you Ounces he said 20 them
occasionally and. finally, unable TO make
himself obsysd. rose and left the house.
On the following evening Sheridan was
z0id OF the incident The great dTzmatist
IS reported 70 have remarked promptly
well. DevIlish ungrateful that / sat
our his tragedy or Wednesday and laughed
from beginning TO end.T
Another capital story Is being repeated on
Ro5ert Downing. who, in common with Mr.
Eznfore Is . native Of this city. This
narrative includes the information that Mr.
Downing is quite lirterateuT, reads con-
tinuslly. and was really delighted Whea be
found himself able a year ago. 10 spend
has sumner almost under the walls OF the
new Congressional Library. After arriving
here be began frequenIing the big building
CT The hili until ali the clerks grew 20 know
him and his taste for odd volumes. The
actor spent nearly every moment Of his
spare time among the desks il the centre
ot tie structure and greatly increased his
store Of knowledge- But one day in June
enc unfortunate day-Mr. DoWning's lean
ing turned TO poetry and, upon reaching his
accustomed place, ne took card and wrote
upon il the name Of the cele-
brsted Rubsiyat OF Omar Khayyam,
the wonderful verses OF Per
sian genius. The applicant did not
ask for FitzgeraId's or for any other Of the
works numerous versions, but sent down
the slip as it was. Presently an attendant
hove in sight bearing a heavy. wood bound
book with leather straps and strange let
ters on the top. Upon seeing il, AF. Down
ing was electrified and, after opening il. de-
terminsd that he must have been mistaken
Tor q Chinamzn- The pages were brown
ard on each were printed about twenty
mystical characters that resembied moth
Ing so much as tie Turkish words il the
Koran. Mr. Downing gsZed al them a fun
minute before the truth occurred 20 him.
He had asked for the Rubaiyat without
mentioning any translation and he had been
given copy OF the original written in
Persian and bound IN Oriental fashion The
mater was easily adjusted, but the exper-
isace has taught Nr. Downing q lesson re-
gardlnE the resources OF the Congressional
Ifh-z-y-aud his next choice OF q work VIII
Be accompanied not onIy by the name Of its
author. but By explicit directions as TO the
version. its covering. the number Of pages
contained therein, and other information
thar may be OF value 70 the attendants.
Manager Chase. OF the Grand Opera
TI01se. was reminded OF an enjoyable an
ec10fe the other dag by a jest printed in
this column The article in question told
hcw various New York typesetters hal
EuGdlez the name Of plzylet exploited
By Pstrice. and IL drew the gentleman in
question into such a reminiscent vein that
he devoted portion OF last week 10 look
lng ever an old scrap book IN search OF a
Eix years NJ Chase declares that the few
lines the clipping contains are the worst
mixed he has ever seen and no one who
compares them with the copy stuck a. their
head can doubt him.
Al the tine that the extract was printed
the vaudeville director had Just lost the
press agent Of his Mount Vernon Park and
F-as attempting 10 attract the attention OF
De pubIlc without assistance The story
Uzs part Of this endezvor. Il concerned
two 0lce-fsmOus singers. knoEa as the
Fairtine Sisters. and was supposed to have
been narrated-lb by the headiiner or the park
bill The yarn told OF how the father OF
TIE two girls was arrested IN the West
FOR q crime OF which he was afterward
proved innocent. OF how a benefit was 10
be given them Ia order 70 defray the ex-
pelses Of a trial, and OF how IN the midst
os q rehearsal. word reached the duo that
q mob rad Iynehed the accused on the pre-
vious evening.
M Chase had treated his topic very
tsndeTly. The lines fairly were soaked
with patAos and the entire effort was 3
most creditable one. It's final sentences
were as follows. The stage manager
was conducting the perfornance-one OF
the meAOdic Chimes OF Normandy while
tie P1irtine Sisters were seated n the
centre OF the roam, their faces almost the
color of their white wigs. In the midst Of
TX A@A1@-sa- N---~ so4-6 4e4-0N stopper
fh0rt- A telegraph boy had been shown
81 and had givez him q message He read
Il aloud The father had been hung the
nighE bef9re. There was no further need
for the money" That was all
II would be difficult 70 guess just how
the thing happened. but this was not the
form IN which that beautiful incident was
described ON the following morning A
country printer had labored over the copy
all day and here Is what he had made Of IL.
The stage manager wss conducting the