The Portland daily press., 1899-12-08

From whom did you purchase yonoer
pumpkinsf"
From Uncle So-and-so Of Rota," an
swered the man.
"That is rs II should bel" cried out
Uncle Buscabeatas- HE Is just At for
such businessi When his own vegetable
patch, which is a very poor one. fetches
him In but little, he sets to work to rob
his neighbors"
But" continued the magistrate. turn
ing to the old gardener. admitting the
hypothesis that 40 pumpkins were stolen
from you last night, how can you be GER
tain that these. and no others, arc
yoursT
"well, wellr' replied Uncle Buscabea-
tas why, because know them as well
as your excellency knows your own
daughter, IL you have any. This one
look, your excellency-is named Rebo-
fonda, (round and puffy: this one. Cachi-
gordeta pretty, plump slice): that one,
Barrigona (potbelly); that one, Cooradilla
dainty colored). and that other one yon-
der, Manuela, because II resembles my
youngest daughter so much"
And thereupon the poor old man began
to weep very bitterly.
'This is all very good" returned the
Judge of supplies, "but the law is not
satisfied with your merely recognizing
your pumpkins. The authorities must
feel convinced as TO the previous condi-
ton of the things in question. and thereof
you must give adequate proof. Gentle
men, you have no right to smile. am
lawyerW
"Well, then. your excellency shall see
how quickly l can prove to everybody
without ever stirring from this spot that
yonder pumpkins were grown in my vege-
table garden" exclaimed Uncle Busca-
beatas, to the no small amazement OF the
bystanders.
And, dropping on the ground bundle
that he had been carrying and crouching
down till he sat upon his heels, he began
quietly to unite the many knots in the
handkerchief wrapped about the afore-
said bundle.
The wonder Of the magistrate, the stall
keeper and the crowd increased rapidly.
what Is he going to pull out?" they
asked one another.
At the same instant up came another
inquisitive body to see what was occur
ring, and the stallkeeper. espying him,
called out:
Il am glad you have come. Uncle So
and-so! This man says the pumpkins
that you sold me last night and that are
here listening to the conversation were
stolen. Now, you answer him."
The newly arrived turned yellower than
wax and tried TO run away. but the by
ISLANDERS bodily prevented him. and the
Judge of supplies ordered him to stay
where he was.
As for Uncle Buscabeatas, he was al
ready eying the supposed thief and say
ing:
Now you shall see what Is good"
Regaining composure, Uncle So-and-so
held forth as follows:
"You are the one who had better heed
what you are talking about, for il you do
not and you cannot prove your accuse
ton l shall have you sent to jail for libel
These pumpkins were mine. l raised
them, as likewise oil the others that l
have brought to Cadix this season, In my
kitchen garden at Egido, and nobody can
prove the contrary"
"Well, you shall seew calculated Uncle
Buscabeatas, who, having at length got
the handkerchief unified. drew forth and
scattered ON the ground its contents-a
multitude of pumpkin stems, still green
and dripping moisture-and then, seated
on his heels and nigh dead with laughter.
he addressed the following speech to the
curious bystanders:
Gentlemen, haven't you paid taxes?
And haven't you seen the ugly green
book. from which the tax collector tears
of receipts, leaving still attached to it
stump or little slip, so as to prove wheth-
er such and such a receipt be false or
notP'
"You refer to the 1ibre talonario' Stub
book" gravsly observed the judge of
supplies.
"Well, that is just what am fetching
here-the libro talonario' Of my vegeta-
Bile patch, or otherwise the heads to
which these pumpkins were Joined before
they were stolen from me. Look, gentle
men, aud see! Here Is the head to this
pumpkin. No one can doubt II. This
next one, as you see. belongs to this 9TH
err pumpkin. Here is one thicker, which
one for this. There Is another for that.
And this pumpkin goes on yonder stem"
Thus speaking, he kept fitting q head
or stump to the cavity made in each
pumpkin when torn from the vine, and
the spectators saw with amazement that,
in fact, the irregular and crooked ends of
whitish shape and slight hollow present
ed by what we may call the cicatrices Of
the pumpkins.
Then all the bystanders stopped down,
including both the policemen and the
magistrate himself, and began to assist
Uncle Buscabeatas in so singular a YER
ifcation, all sxclaiming in the same
breath with childish glee:
"No, no! 1t is 30 undoubtedly! Look
here, gentlemen! This goes here; that
goes there. Yonder pumpkin belongs to
this STEM this pumpkin to that STEM"
And the loud laughter of grown up
men mingled with the shrill cries Of
urchins, with the imprecations of wo-
men, with the old gardeners tears of
triumph and gladness and with the
thumps that the bumbailiffs began to be-
stow upon the now convicted thief, as II
impatient to carly him off to jail.
There Is no need TO add that the bum
bailiffs got their wish; that Uncle So
and-so beheld himself obliged to hand
back to the huckster the Is duros re-
reive6 from the same: that the latter