The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1899-02-16
Sforyeffes.


conversational footing between them
selves, though the Texan couldn't quite
understand why the young man
wouldn't "take nip for night cap
Before they slept the talk turned upon
the customs and morals of Texas as
exemplified i'll lynching, the young man
arguing against it.
Gee whiZ, you don't reckon we
Oughtn't to hang a boss thief, do your
the Texan exclaimed in tones of horror,
but without profanity, out of Difference
TO the character of the other side.
''MOst assuredly not"
But what ought we do with him :?
Not let him get loose?"
''Let the law take its course"
"Mebbe it'll miss fire and the cuss'll
git away"
"That is not your fault If the law
says he is guiltless you must accept
the decision and forgive the sinner"
"They amt no authority fer that, is
thar"
"The Bible"
"Thar's nothin' thar that covers the
ground"
ooh yes, my FRIEND" said the student,
warming in his zeal; "even the thief on
the cross was forgiven"
For some reason the Texan seemed
to choke moment, till he caught his
voice again.
cav, here, young feller," he ex-
claimed III a tone of eXpostulation,
'that wasn't no boss thief" and the
Texan was so serious about it that the
young man had to laugh in spite of
himself
y German lady, arriving for the first
time in England, drove to a frstclass
London hotel, asked for room, and
was shown into very small, scantily
furnished one She said, in a deter
mined manner and in very broken
English, Il will not have this ROOM"
'NO, ma'am'' said the porter, and
brought in the first box.
MAN. repeated the lady emphatic
ally" 81 will not have this rOomw
"No, maam," said the porter, and
brought in the second box.
The lady thought her faulty gram
NAUTICAL construction was the reason of
the porter's continued obstinacy, and
repeated, with stern distinctness:
'Man, l will have this room not
haver'
"No, ma'am,' said the porter, and
brought in the third box, whereupon
the lady left the room Indignantly, but
the porter drew her hurriedly back
across the threshold, pulled rope, and,
to her establishment, the lift went up.
OKO
Old Zach Wheeler was quite char.
acter in his time, being clever, easy
going, confding man, who managed to
let everybody cheat him out of his in
herited estates. Just as the last farm
was about to slip out of his hands he
succeeded in raising the money to lift
the mortgage. Aaron Romer, a prom
inent Mason, accompanied him to the
registers office, which was in neigh
boring town. AS they were riding
along on horseback, so Aaron says,
Zach, in a confiding manner, said:-
"Now, Aaron, we are here all alone,
and 1 want you to tell me the secrets
of Masonry"
81 can't, Zach; they would kill me-"
"Why, no, they won't; they'll never
find it out"
eyes, they will; you'll tell of it."
"No. swear 1 won't"
"Well, if you'll ride close alongside
of me, and put your hands under my
thigh, and take the oath III admins
ter, III tell you the secrets of Masonry"
Zach was not slow to comply, and
most powerful "iron- clad" oath was ad-
ministered and taken.
'Now for the secrets" exclaimed the
impatient and unsuspecting victim.
SWELL" said Aaron, with mock
solemnity and secrecy, Gin the first
place, we Masons combine together to
cheat everybody as much as we can.
This is the first grand secret. The sec
ond is like unto it. When we can't find
anybody else to cheat we cheat each
other, but as little as we can"
"Well, exclaimed Zach, with evident
surprise, 81 swear l'll join. wish had
done it twenty years ago-I might
have been rich man afOre now"
OXO
Talking about rainy weather." said
the Westerner, 81 remember once out
in Indianapolis meeting farmer who
took the most cheerful view of damp
ness of ANYBODY | ever saw I asked