The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1899-05-05

, was only a distant relative on my
r fathers side.
He had been knocking about for the
last fifteen years or so in Australia, and
having amassed a considerable for
tune, returned now to his native city,
with the hope of ending his DAYS
among his kindred.
. He was unmarried; and hidden
secretly away in his rugged bachelor
heart was the long-cherished dream of
wife and ffreside of his own.
But after spending the best part of
his life in rough toll, separated from
all society of women-or in fact, sOcie-
ty of any sort-he found himself now
laboring under great disadvantages.
The girls that he knew and played
with when he was boy had grown SO
far away from him in many directions
that he felt he had no part or lot with
them, and so, slowly and sadly, the
hope OF years began TO fade away.
1t was just here that de. r, ..ld-fash-
Toned Aunt Bethia came into his life;
and from the first moment of their
meeting Uncle jerry appropriated her
in Eis heart of hearts, as the one wo-
man specially provided for him, and
straightforward elected her to preside
over the ideal future he had dreamed
of.
In short, for the first time in his life
he found himself passionately in love,
and as men of his age are apt to do in
such case, ne resolved to make short
work" of his wooing.
Accordingly he spent one week in
watching her every word and action
and in studying her face from under
his shaggy eyebrows, while he pre-
tended to read his newspaper.
Another week he devoted to follow
ing her about and waiting upon her
with such alarming ssiduity, that the
little woman began to wonder and to
trenble at she knew not what.
Finally, he grew impatient to know
his fate.
What is the use of beating about
the bush p lie said to himself, in his
blunt fashion; if she don't fancy me
now she never will, aud may as we'll
| know"
So he came in upon her one after
noon as she sat knitting by the win
! dow, and ,nerving himself for decisive
| effort, he TINS addressed her:
| "Bethia, hain't known you long,
to be cure, but feel better acquainted
with you today than should with any
| other woman in years time. Things
, have changed 'mazingly' in the fifteen
| years that I've been away from home,
and the women most of all. find
! don't know 'em.
| The girls that used to study out
of the same books with at school,
hear talking now about culture and
art, and 'affinities, and so on and so
| forth-a Greek to me. l left 'em
| doin' homework and knittin' stock
ms, and now find 'em playin' on the
pianner, and ravin' over picters and
statoos-things | don't know nothin'
about-and what's more, don't want
to!
THE only s.atoos that l ever liked
the looks on at all, is the Injun girls
standin' outside of the tobacker shops.
And as for music--why, BeIhia, I'd
ruther hear you sing cid Naomi. the
way you did last Sunday night, than
all their rattle and clatter.
81 did use to think when l was out
In Australy, that wien l come home
I'd git married aud try to settle do Hn,
but | DON'T s'spose any of these new
fashioned, highfalutin' women would
have me with all my money; and"
says he, ungallantly, by George
don't know as l want them"
You see ~ ne continued, APOLOGIZE.
cally, I'VE couldn't take much comfort
together less we felt somewhere nigh
alik- abo1t things, now could We ?"
why no. said Aunt Bethia, can
didly, locking up at him in q medita-
tive way; Il don't s'spose you could"
And should hate to see my nor ey !
fooled away on trash that dom, care |
a continental for, though know wo-
men are master hands to spend money,
and l mean my wife shall have plen- |
ty,. too" ., ~
travagant, I'm sure" said Aunt |
Be5hia, with some show of spirit. II
know l amt, unless" she added, depre- |
catingly, perhaps am in the matter |
OF white aprons. Mother always said
SO, and | do like plenty of clean aprons |
saw one ev,ry afternoon"
my wife shall have a clean one for
every hour in the day, if she wants !"
reared Uncle Jerry, the enthusiasm.
And, now l think of it, by George,
If don't believe white apron dresses
up a woman more than the big Koch |
moor coGld
And shouldn't wonder, after all,
if them white aprons had somethin'
to do with your lookin' SO different
from other women-so kinder good |
and old-fashioned, you know"
Aunt Bethia blushed and laughed.
They call me the 'old-fashioned
| woman she said, simply.
And | am an old fashioned man."
he said significantly.
Then he looked at her and met the
startled glance of her soft eyes.
| To- I,n 70 n
me, thSt there's somethiu' peculiarly
interestin' in the fact that l am an
old-fashioned man, and you are an old
| fashioned womln-coincidence amt
| it now:"
| Dear me, "murmured Aunt Bertha
| dropping dozen stitches in her con-
fusion; why, no, hadn't thought
ont"
He took her hands with gentle force,
llnittingwork and all, and bent over
her.
think ont now. then, won't your"
said he. Come, Bethia, be my wife,
and we will show the world what u
happy couple an old-fashioned man
and an old-fashioned woman can ber
She looked up into the honest, kind
ly face, glowing down upon her, and
it treasured her. The grasp of his
| hands SO firm, yet SO loving, compelled
her, and with thrill sweet as strange,
she opened her heart at orce and well
coined in his love as the bird does its
mate to the nest.
She dropped her head in confusion,
and foolishly, just for the sake of say
ing something, faltered:
81 know l am old-fashioned."
"Old-fashioned! So is daisy! go is
robin red breast-and so, by George,
am ~ Aud plucking up courage,
Uncle Jerry took her face in his hands
and kissed her on both cheeks, and
lastly, on her lips.
UNEXPECTED RESPONSES
A teacher explaining to class that
the land of the world was not oontin-
uous, said to the boy who happened
to be standing nearest to him, Now,
could your father walk around the
world?" mo, SIR" was promptly
answered. "Why not2' Because
he's dead" was the altogether unlock
editor response. AS little anticipated
probably was the answer made to
another teacher, who asked, What
is howell" and was met with the re-
ply, "What you live in"
PATS EXPLANATION.
Gentleman Ito an Irishman): "Well,
Pat, see you have a small garden"