The Worcester spy. [volume] (Worcester, Mass.) 1898-1904, 1899-10-22
UP TO DATE CLERK.
Dapper Drug Man is
a Human Ency-
clopedia.
%5,,5
SHOULD KNOW EVERYTHING.
TS7N&2fs3l
J. Must 4 Answer Foolish Cues
lions and KNOCK" His
2Tk Acquaintance.

Inc 10th century drug clerk is the
nearest human approach to an ency-
clopedia. The slick looking fellow who
draws soda, sells cigars, and answers
foolish questions on an average of IL
hours each day, in addition to COM
pounding prescriptions, if he be reg
istered, is supposed to know about ev-
erything conceivable in current, future
or past. events. The same dapper, sal
low complexioned chap who acts as
though he had not care in the world,
is usually burdened with trouble
Worcester drug clerks are the best
dressed men in local mercantile life
Customers always wonder how it is
possible for &. drug clerk to wear tailor
made clothes, sport the nobbiest of
cravats, and top off with neckties for
each day in the week, and trousers of
such a hue as to blend with a clouded
or clear sky, sunshine or stormy
weather The human encyclopedia"
is a world heater when it comes to
shreWd figuring. He must possess this
FACULTY or he Is small potatoes in the
estimation of the proprietor. The man
Who receives a salary of IS per week
and never beats the cash register yet
lives like a thoroughbred in time off, "
will probably own the store, and hire
the proprietor to open the door for
customers at the beginning of another
century if drug clerks continue the
absorption of the novel methods of liv-
ing faster than the public hears of
them, and do not shut the valve
through which a world of information
has been pouring into their gray mat
ter in recent years.
Customers add tinge of pleasure or
unhappiness to the drudgery of the in
door life of a drug clerk. If a clerk
should be caught mapping by a Gus
toner and is forced to consult time
table to answer question as to the
leaving time of a train or street rail-
way car he Is at once stamped as
green" Should he fail to notify each
customer that a demonstration is dis
pensng samples in the rear of the
store, the proprietor concludes that the
young man is dickering for an automo-
bile on a house lot on the west side,
and that his mind is away from bust
ness.
Customers in drug stores are usually
very communicative. and Ioungers are
especially so, because it gives them an
EXCUSE for maintaining a loafing place.
Nothing. so delights the ear of a drug
clerk as an exclusive bit OF information
concerning Bills Indebtedness or i'm
pending trouble for some young man
who has been insulted by a landlady
who had the audacity to ask for three
weeks room rent.
Here is a sample Of drug store gossip
when business is light and the store is
filled with the regulars"
Say, Joe is en- the firing line tonight,
fellers. Saw him down street and hei
wasloaded. I Kind Of pity him. and, Of
course, none of the gang will say a
word about it."
Joe owes me a half. Borrowed it
about a month ago"
He let you down easy" chirps in the
clerk He touched me for two bones
the other night. Here he comes now.
Hello, old man, glad to see you. Quite
a stranger, joe"
After buying smokes for the gang,
and making a good fellow of himself,
Joe goes out. Sorrow is manifested at
his early departure. When the door
slams, the discussion joys along like
this:
THAT man gives me pain. He never
was known to move except in the night.
Guess he don't know much, anyway"
He is about the biggest jayhawk I've
seen in years
Everybody who is inclined to leave
the circle of gossipers gets discussed, /
and it continues along the same lines
until the clerk is left alone. He is the
best fellow in the bunch then. There is
no one to knock" him.
bustling, busy woman came hust-
ling into a local drug store recently,
and stepping up to the clerk who was
smoothing his hair she brusquely or
dered: Zone bottle of Johnny Hoff' S
malt" Yes, ma am" answered the
clerk, and walking. to the rear of the
store, he brought out a bottle of Jo-
ham Hoffs malt, and the deal was
closed without the slightest grin on the
knowing clerks face. When the wo-
man reached the sidewalk, the clerk
was having a smile and laugh in the
back room or back shop" as druggists
and clerks always designate the. space
at thesrear Of the prescription desk.
Then a supercilious looking man with
vaxed fnustache enters, shifts and
lights aehefeot, The clerk is wait
ing to. catch the first word. The i'm
portant man gives his order: 81 want
a box of those round pills. like those
bought here a few weeks ago" What
forYp1 asked the clerk. ess'To use, young
II an, to use; what are pills made for?ii
Cold in the head, lungs or chest. in
digestion. violent headache or anything
Of that sort can be cured by our own
pills,rsvefltured the clerk Don't care
whose they are!" snapped the custom
er. "but I am in a hurry" Half a
minute later he dives into his coat
rocket and fishes out the bottle which
steps the whirling mass in the clerks
think tank On the bottle is the num-
her of the prescription, and the clerk
hastily fills it. Might have done it
in the first placel" growled the Gus
toner as he takes his change and walks
out of the store biting q quarter for a
nn,,ntnrfait lest The clerk dared NOT