Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1899-09-28
a spanking for arsday."


from the professions of the past that
made some people respect him, and his
head is becoming enormously swelled.
In New York, recently, he publicly
apologized for the canal ring thieves;
later, in Ohio, he made speech en-
dorsing the Republican platform, which
applauds the Presidents blow at the
Civil Service. And TEDDY" made
his best reputation as Civil Service
reformer. More recently he has been
making himself insanely ridiculous
by attempting to put himself forward
as the star attraction of the Dewey
reception.
Teddy deserves good spanking,
and he gets it. The spanking is adj
ministered by that admirable publica-
ton, The Philistine, printed by the
Society of the Philistines, East Au-
rora, N. Y, and in manner and form
is as follows:
Hes only buy-don't take him
too seriously-Teddy of Oyster Bay.
Just kid is our own Teddy, with his
thirst for adventure, and itch for turn
ing things upside down, his rough
riding. big game killing and broncho
busting! Only an oyergrown fighting
kid, with dirty face, buttons off his
clothes through much rastling, and a
casual suggestion of shrt-tail that he
has neglected to tuck in.
"Boys are savages-boys are destruc-
tive; boys are cruel. To bust and
kill, and stamp upon things is the
delight of the boy. Boys are DULLES:
they cuff their younger brothers, pinch
their sisters. arrange bent Fins for
their elders. shoe the cat with walnut
shells and tie tin kettles to Rover's
tail
"They catch fish and throw them on
the bank and watch them gasp and
founder in the sun, They snare song
birds in the woods; rob nests; put fer
rets into rabbit burrows; tie each
others clothes into knots when they go
swimming taking caro- not to modest
the clothes of the big, red-headed
fighting boysl, and they duck all the
little boys who cannot swim.
"But most boys outgrow the destruc-
tive period and evolve into something
better, leaving these destructive boyish
things behind. Occasionally you find
man who Is yet boy-such one is
our own Teddy.
Teddy is boy in all his instincts,
4 ap,httionu and .Sr;rat;opc and trhan
he comes to us with highly moral
plea for "A Strenuous Life, he shows
the spasm Of wanting to be good that
comes occasionally over every boy.
Boys Of twelve who go forward and
kneel at the mourners' bench are not
TO be trusted-it's only q moody, half
hypocritioal, transient desire 20 reform.
They will girde your apple trees neat
week.
"Teddy is forty years of age, forty
past, and he'll never change. Hell
put ferrets into rabbit burrows to this
end of his days, and at seventy-fiye
. when the corners Of his eyes are full o.
plum tree gum, and there's quaver il
his voice, and a sciatic limp TO hi
walk, he'll suck eggs, catch mice fo
the fun of clipping their ears and tails
and make you 'chaw beef If he get
the chance.
Teddy himself has told us tina
when he was Assistant Secretary of tn
Navy, the hum drum duties of tn
place palled upon him. He paced tn
Q streets with Leonard Wood. restless an,
disconnected. The piping times q
: peace were not to the taste of thes
: men-they longed for something t
happen.
= Through Teddy's influence tn
+ Maine was sent to Havana harbor
n something happened! have read his
g tory little, and know the record c
9 the rough riders who through rough
n on-rats policy towards the lesser breed
/ without the law, have made this worl
x place of the skull. The man of vic
: lence has ever received quick recogni
:. tion-but not lasting fame. We def
u only the gentle mantle man {
y thought and feeling-the man of hear
Q The sober good sense OF the tim,
ID simply through the law of self-presc
IS walton. will not continue to push to IL
le front the man who delights in a fight
II "In passing it is we'll to note tt
20 truth, that there is no virtue nor exec
lence, per SO, in the Strenuous Life
10 The highest wisdom often consists
is mere passivity. Contemplation
20 usually safer than hustling, and wht
you are in doubt about what to d
take the advice of Seneca and do not
- ing. .0-a4.t5.
az TEDDY is as high now as he W
:. ever get. To promote him furth
~ would be TO invite him to swing b
~ chapararros astride the neck Of Ere
~ dom and ride hell-to.split ra
., through our fondest hopes of the Ide
he Republic.
~ IF Teddy had the power he'd 70
- mankind as mavericks and brand us q
y with red hot iron OF his own devic
- and with the butt end of a quirt he
- persuade us into his own way Of thin
80 ing.
~ "Not that Teddy is bad boy, q
~ no--he is his mammals daring cots
= tootsy, who has SO much life and enere
=, you know And then boys will be DO!
4 anyway. Lawks a-daisyn'
SO ----g-
leS The first vessel to greet Admit
I'VE Dewey and his cruiser, the Olymp
go in the waters OF New York Bay,
so Tuesdav ,nornino was the Long Rran