The Anaconda standard., 1899-03-10
COMEDY OF A SHOTGUN.


had a thrilling experience and lost his
nerve There wa time when he
| quoted Tom Moor. IaIieved that every
pretty girl liked 10 II, kissed, and posed
as devil OF a fellow among the ladies'.
| Now he abjures poetry and kisses and
has a chastened and apologetic air.
When he calls upon a girl he prefers
having chaperon IN the room
The young woman VINO wrought this
reformation is in a New York boarding
school; and when S"e came pack. af.er
the Christmas holidays. she told, with
unfeeling glee, thr tale of the man who
was frightened into walking the path
of rectitude and prlHiety. He had been
devoting himself to her, with true Texan
enthusiasm, and un New Years eve, he
| called upon her, and pushed the fiirta-
ton along with reckless zeal. The
| boarding school g.II was presumably
unsophisticated. II would never do to
assume that she led The youth on. One
| doesn't learn such things in New York
| boarding schools This fact being estab-
/ lished, one may imagine her horror and
anger when her admirer suddenly, ana
| quite without prove ation-this is the
story as told by thn matden-kissed her.
| She was angry. very angry Her first
| remark proved thai
| IF you do that again, I'll tell papa
| SIle Sdiu severely.
The offender wasn't terrified. He had
an 1bsenian idea that people don't do
| those things" The possibility of an en-
core being sugges;pI he promptly re-
peated his rash act Now. the moral of
this story is. first know your girl. This
particular girl astonished the young
| man who had formulated his theories
from feminine genelaities. She rose in
frigid haughtiness. and walked toward
\ lan RI IA ,,,1 CT rnI a n
retreating form. Sh" was really going.
He appealed to her. m humble accents.
She ignored him. II" apologized but
she sta!ked through the door without
turning her head. WAen she had gone,
he dropped upon the sofa. and wiped his
brow. Suppose she should tell her fatn-
err To be sure. girls never did those
things, but she might be an exception,
and her back had locked angry and de-
mined. He was distinctly unhappy. Her
father. the colonel. had the reputation
of being hot tempered. II she should
tell the colonel, and he should take
things seriously--the rash young man
looked Wistfully toward the door II
she didn't tell her father. would she
come back? Supposn she should return
to find he had fed in dsmay! No; he
would stand his ground. He settled him
self upon the sofa and waited.
Meanwhile the irsutpd young woman
marched firmly and sternly from the
parlor to her fathers den. The colonel
looked up from his book inquiringly.
Papa" said his daughter with inno-
cent sweetness, "Mr. Smith is down.
stairs. and I've been trying to tell him
about your new gun that came home
this morning. You know he is wild
about hunting. You'd like him so much.
He doesn't understand about these new
irnproyenapte T c0u1ln't pXD1ain them.
you know, but he wants awfully to see
the gun. and told him I was sure you
would show it to him
The colonel jumped up with alacrity.
He was mighty hunter, and guns were
his hobby. The opportunity to show his
latest acquisition to sympathetic fel-
low sportsman was a joy to him.
Certainly, my dear, certainly he
said. rrr
He took a shotgun down from the
rack. handling it over with care. A
queer expression twinkled in his daugh-
ter's eyes, but he didn't notice it. Her
mouth was quite demure. She followed
him down the stairs and through the
hall. The young man, on the parlor
sofa, heard manly footsteps approach
ing. The perspiration broke out upon
his forehead. If she really had told her
father, what should he do, what could
he say? He rose and tried to steady his
shaking knees. The door opened. On
it's threshold stood the colonel. with a
shotgun firmly srasped in his hands.
For one-half of a second Smith stood
transfixed with horror. Then, before
the colonel had time to speak, the
young man gave a stified cry, looked
desperately round the room, rushed to
the long French window. flung it open
and plunged over the balcony into the
darkness beyond The girl has not seen
him since that inglorious exit, and the
colonel is still puzzling over the erratic
conduct of his daughters friend. For
obvious reasons the daughter has never
volunteered an explanation.
The success of the Texas girls story
inspired one Of her roommates to cap it
with a story of her own. 1t also con-
cerned a daring young man and stern
father, but it's moral was not so pointed
and profitable. This time the joke was
on the father. The roommate lives in
Cincinnati. and, she, too, went home fer
the holidays. Her father is a lawyer,
with a face severe enough 10 frighten a
defendant into fits, and with rigid ideas
upon the discipling of daughters, His
own daughter happens to be particular
ly charming. and when she does go
home from school venturesome youths
will fiutter around her, but her father
has uncompromsing objections to them.
If thye call the chances are against
their seeing the young woman, and if
they do get In they watch the clock
with an anxiety that dampens their en-
joyment. There is a tradition ahoat
that anyone staying later than 9 o'clock
would be thrown out. The girl has
one admirer who is abundantly supplied
with the useful commodity known as
nerve. During the holidays he man
aged to see her Oftener than any of his
rivals. but he always carefully observed
the time limit and avoided paternal
wrath until the evening before the
girls return to New York.
Then he fingered, and when the clock
struck he cheerfully disregarded it.
Half past came and the girl was
frightened, but the imperturbable youth
seemed unconscious that he was sitting
on the edge of a volcano and dangling
! his feet in the crater. When the hands
of the clock pointed to a quarter befole
! 10 a heavy tread was heard in the hall
The girl looked frightened. but the
| cheerful youth assumed an expression
of pleasant expectation. The portieres