davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
ONE ON THE PROFESSOR.
College Episode Narrated in Glcc h,
the Boy Who Thought
1t Funny.

II wonder if told you how Young
fooled old Roots the Greek professor,
exam. timer" asked Billy, and as no
one could truthfully say that he had
heard it, Billy started in:
Roots as we call him, thinks, al
ways, that some one is cribbing in
exams. Now, in reality, he's away off,
because the fellows don't crib up there
now, but Roots is always looking for a
chance to catch some one, and he got
it last week. We were having an exam.
in Greek and he was sneaking up and
down the aisles watching everyone. He
was Mt the end of the room furthest
away from Young when he happened
to look over and see Young take out
his watch. You can't work that old
watch crib game on Roots he's too old,
and when he saw Young's watch appear
he sneaked up back of him to see if
there was anything wrong. He could
walk almost as quietly as a cat, and
was behind Young without having made
sound, just as he touched the spring
and the cover of the watch opened.
There surely was piece of paper in
that watch case and Roots saw it. That
was enough. He leaped over, grabbed
it and told Young to come to the desk
with him. We Immediately came to
the conclusion that there was some-
thing wrong, so everyone stopped writ
ing and watched Roots and Young.
Up to the desk they went; then Roots
sat down and without looking at the
watch, which he held in his hand,
looked at Young and said:
"'Mr. Young, l find that you have
been trying to use aid in this examina-
tion.'
"T beg your PARDON Young an
swered. 4 haven't used anything in an
unfair way
Roots was taken back for mo-
ment at the fellows nerve when he
had been caught red-handed. But
what have you to say about this paper,
Mr.. Young? said he. You were about
to make use of it and it has written
upon it Here he paused and looked
at the paper, then blushed and APP
peared to grow angry, and finally told
Young to take his seat and go on with
his paper.
what it all meant was more than
we could make out, and it was not UNI
til after the exam. that we found that
the paper had contained but one word,
and that word was fooled IN. Y.
Sun.
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
HAPPY YEARS OF YOUTH.
Them and Should BE Consider
ate Of the Young.

AS the years go by we become little
by little out of touch with the things
with which we were wont to delight
our childish hearts. Who that is
grown to manhood or womanhood
would find much pleasure in wading
through the deep snow and exposing
himself to cold and wet? Yet when
the thick mantle of white recently COW
cred the earth, boys and girls by the
dozens might be seen romping where
the drifts were deepest, falling, rolling.
deluging one another, and all in the
best of spirits. Or they built strong
forts behind whose walls an enormous
amount of ammunition was stored in
the shape of snowballs deftly rolled.
ready for use in repelling an attack of
the enemy, should one be ventured
Then came the sally with arms laden
with the cold, white missiles, and such
shouting and laughter as only children
can produce. And, too, there was the
building of great snow men, whose
portly bodies rested on prodigious legs
and whose heads comfortably adioined
their shoulders without the Bother of
intervening necks. All these are among
the joys that we knew in younger days.
They are just as potent and full of at
Effectiveness to the youths of to-day as
they were to US, and so it will be as long
as the world wags on and snow falls.
And although We no longer feel our
spirits moving us to take part in these
sports, we should look upon them with
q deal Of sympathy, recalling the times
when they were to US of as much i'm
portance as the more serious game of
life now seems to be.-Detroit Free
Press
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
SCARED BY THE DISTANCE.
Telephone Charges Make Her Forget
What She Was Going
to Say.

1t was evidently the first time the girl
had received long-distance telephone
call. She had waited around the drug
store for an hour in a state of high ex-
pectation and every time the telephone
bell rang she would say to the clerk:
Its for me this time, isn't it?" Then
look of extreme disappointment would
fit over her face as he would shake his
head to the contrary. At length the
drug clerk said: miss Grace" and she
stepped out of the telephone box. A
deep flush mounted to her face and
with nervous step she crossed tho
floor, while the clerk and few lis
tcners watched her movements in an
interested manner.
"Shc is going to be married next
week to fellow out Of town." the clerk
explained. 81 presume he's the one at
the other end"
"IIello, hello! Yes, this is Grace"
foatcd from the half-open box-door.
'This is Grace, ! say. Yes, I am Grace.
Hello! Is that you, Eddie?" A pause.
"Oh-h-h!" Then not another word did
she utter until she said: "Good-by,"
and hung up the telephone.
"Did you get the Connection" asked
the clerk.
EYES,"
"You didn't have much to say. All
the talking must have been at the other
end"
mo, it wasn't" Then, laughing. for
she knew him we'll, she continued:
"You know, l waited an hour and had
SO much to say wondered how l could
ever say it all in three minutes. | was
sure would have to talk ten or fifteen
minutes at least, and it is awfully ex-
pensive from New York"
"Your fiance?"
"Yes. I wanted to tell him all about
the wedding arrangements and all that,
and when 1 picked up the receiver my
thoughts left me and couldn't think
of thing, so didn't talk"
allow about him?"
"Well, I don't know. But as soon as
he found out he had the connection, he
didn't say thing, so we just held the
wire until the signal came to cut off,
then we said good-by. There's nine
dollars thrown away"
Connection possibly bad?" suggest
ed the clerk.
mo. Just scarf" the girl said, a.
she went out.-Chicago Chronicle.
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
HOW HE CAME TO LEAD.
Aguinnldo Shot n Spanish Officer
Sent to Arrest Him and
Made n speech.

Gen. Emilio Aguinaldo y Fanny, the
president of the Filipinos, is little more
than 80 years of age. He was born in
linus, n little village near Cavite. His
father was a planter, and the son was
first sent to the College of St. Jean de
Lateran, then to the University of st.
Thomas, in Manila. The youths educa-
ton cost the father much privation, for
the cost of pursuing course of study
at these institutions is not less than
1900 francs year, and the elder
Aguinaldo had great difficulty to make
both ends meet.
At st. Jean de Lateran the student ia
drilled in Spanish and Latin and the
classics, and when he is able to trans
late the masterpieces of Rome with
facility he is ready for the University
of st. Thomas. This, like the college,
is under the Dominicans. In the uni
versity the principal studies are
physics, metaphysics, theology, juris-
prudence, law and medicine.
Aguinaldo was adjudged very dull
student and gave no promise of dis
tinction. In fact, the Dominicans
finally sent him home in sheer despair.
Aguinaldo then entered the normal
school of the Jesuits. Here he made
some progress, but ut this time his ia
Their died, when the youth was forced to
return home to take care of his
patrimony, which was threatened by
lawsuits instituted by the Order of the
Recollections-an organization COM
posed of the greatest land proprietors
of the colony.
In was in 1893 that DR.. Rizan created
the Philippine league, the object of
which was to unite politically the vari-
Gus parts of the archipelago. Rial was
banished, but shortly afterward the
order of Katipunan was formed, which
soon had more than 100000 members.
The object of this society was cooper
alton for the protection of the colon
lists.
The government then, fearing an alli-
ance of this society with the freema-
sons and the various secret orders hos
tile to Spanish rule, began to take ac-
tive measures against it. Aguinaldo
was suspected of being one of the lead
ers. A Spanish officer, with squad of
native soldiers, came to arrest him.
Aguinaldo, when confronted by the Off
Ger, promptly shot him, then eloquent
ly appealed to his companions to leave
the service of their foreign oppressors
and strike blow for liberty.
The soldiers received his words with
acclaim and instantly chose him as
their leader. He then sought the fast
nesses of the forest, where he was soon
joined by thousands of his countrymen
all flaming to join the standard of
revolt.-San Francisco Call.
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
said, tremb1ingly, ut will be because

said. tremb1ingly, ut will be because
-you-wish me to; for no other rea-
son."
She raised her eyes to him as she
spoke. They were beautiful eyes, and
sent a thrill through the medical Off
Ger.
II wish you to say 'Yes?'" he ex-
claimed, coming towards her.
"You have been so good to me; YOU
saved my life when first came here.
l should never have recovered but for
your care and attention. always fecl''
she clasped her hands tightly together
you are the only friend 1 have, and
there is nothing l would not do for
your sake"
The passionate warmth of her tone
startled DR.. Evesham. He caught both
the hands with which, ashamed of her
freedom, she was about to cover her
face, and said, tenderly: "My poor
girl! Then you shall never say Yes
to this offer!"
The board was waxing impatient, and
the squire and parson had almost
broken their long friendship over the
prize "gate-post" mangolds, when DR..
Evesham returned with Susannah
West.
well, doctor, 1 hope you have
brought the young woman to see rea-
son." said the former.
II hope So" replied the doctor, dryly.
HAS she said 'Yes,' them" asked
the squire and the butcher in breath,
"she has to me, gentlemen" said DR..
Evesham, reddening. II am going ia
marry her Observation-Disclosures Jour.
nal
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
THE ENGINEERS STORY.

Well, yes, tits hair-curlin' story
would it could not be recalled!
The terrible fright of that hell-tinctured
night
Is the cause of my head bein' bald!
was runnin' the Git-There express, sir,
On the Yankee Creek Jerkwater Line,
An the track along there was as crooked,
swear,
AS the growth of field pumpkin vine.
Ny run was night one, an nights on the
Yank
War as black as the coal piled back there
on the tank.
We pulled out of Tenderfoot station
day and almost half late,
An every durn wheel was a-poundin' the
AT wildly extravagant rate!
My fireman KEEP pilin' the coal in
The jaws of the ol94
Till the sweat from his nose seemed to play
through hose
An splashed round his feet on the floor
AS We Numbered along like demon in
A-rippin' streak through the breast Of
the night!
AS we rounded curve on the mountain,
Full sixty an hour, will swear,
Just ahead was a sight that with blood.
freezin' fright
Would have raised a stuffed buffalo's
hair!
The bridge over Ute Creek was burnin',
The flames shootin' up in their glee!
My God! how they cleaned in the air, till
they seemed
Like fiery-tongued imps on spree!
Jest snickered an sparkled an laughed
like they knowed
I'D make my next trip on different road!
In frenzy reached for the throttle,
But twas stuck an refused to obey!
I yelled in alright, for our maddening
fight
felt that never could stay!
Then wildly grasped the big lever,
Threw her over, then held my hot breath,
An waited fur what assuredly thought
Was sure an terrible death!
Then came the wild crash, an with horror.
fringed yell
Down into that great fiery chasm fell!
When came to myself was lying
On the floor of the bedroom; my wife
Sat astride of my form. an was making it
warm
For her darling. you bet your sweet life!
My hair she had clutched in her fingers
An was jamming my head on the floor.
Yet yelled with delight when found that
my fright
Was horrible dream. nothing more!
had wildly grabbed one of her ankles. she
said,
An reversed her clear over the head of the
bed!
Denver Evening Post.
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
His Fatal Blunder,

Don't you think you could learn to
love me, Mildred'?" faltered the young
man.
81 might have done so, Harry" she
answered, "if you had not taught me to
play chess, but how can ever learn to
love man whom can give the odds of
a pawn and checkmate in 10 moves?'
Chicago Tribune.
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
Quite Different,

Magistrate-You say your wife threw
fiatiron at you?
Plaintiff-No, your honor; said she
threw flatiron and hit men, 7.
Journal
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15
Millions Have 1t,

Wilmer Shortly after the introduc.
toni beg pardon, Miss-I didn't
catch your name?
Miss smith-That's strange. Why,
It's epidemic!-Brooklyn Life.
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15

Queens Travelling Expenaes.
The queens annual comings and 60
ings to and from Scotland alone cost
her close on s25, 900 a year.
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15

The young couple had rushed into
each others arms, and were locked in
fond embrace.-Translated from the
French for the San Francisco Argonaut
by Judson F. Davidson.
The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1899-04-15

"Here is man we'll defended"
thought Anatole.
Finally the door was opened. Ana
tole found himself in the presence of a
gentleman with a large, curled mus
tache, who wore fencing costume as
his night-dress.
always ready, you see. It is my in
vention."
The walls of the ante-chamber were
hidden by suits of armor. In the little
parlor into which Capendac conducted
his visitor, he saw only weapons galore;
ataghans, poisoned arrows, sabres, one
and two-handed swords, pistols, lances;
there was plenty there to make timid
heart quail.
"Bah," thought Anatole, "what do
risk now? Two hours and half at the
most. Here goes"
Monsieur" said Anatole, "you are
going to marry Mile. Nicette?'
Eyes, monster"
Monsieur, you shall not marry her"
BLOOD and thunder, and who will
hinder me?"
II will.''
Capendac looked askance at Anatole,
who was not large man, but who
seemed very determined.
'Ah, young man." said he at length.
"you are lucky to find me in pleasant
humor. Profit by it. Do you know that
have fought 20 duels in which have
had the misfortune to Stay five of my
adversaries and to wound the other 1872
Once more warn you to retire."
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
OUR STOCKS RETURN.
Foreign Holders Have Unloaded to
the Extent of 100000.

New York, Feb. 4.-The Tribune says:
The exceedingly heavy domestic buying
of stocks and bonds on the local stock
exchange last month was not accom-
panied by a similar movement on the
part of London investors. Foreign hold
ers of American securities, on the con-
trary, were extensive sellers, and these
securities are now beginning to arrive
here in enormous volume The Majestic,
which has just arrived from Liverpool,
brought American securities of the ag-
gregate value of more than $4,000. 900
and it is estimated that the Lucania is
carrying about 81, 900, 600 worth more.
The steamers which sailed for New
York in the middle of this week also
have on board many packages contain
ing American stocks. Foreign houses
having sold these securities in this city
for London account have been borrow
ing the stocks on the exchange here for
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
SHOTGUN QUARANTINE
Against Smallpox Prevails Over
Large Part of Arkansas.

Little Rock, Ark, Feb. 4.-Governor
Jones will send another special message
to the legislature dealing with the
smallpox situation. The pest now exists
in half a dozen counties. In Fulton and
lizard counties the disease is epidemic
and much excitement prevails in neigh
boring localities. At Mountain Home a
rigid quarantine with Shotguns has
been established and no one is allowed
to enter from either Fulton or lizard
counties. At West Plains, Mo-, a short
distance away, the fear and excitement
are even greater.
Guards watch both day and night on
the Townsville, Mountain Home and
Salem wagon roads and all the trains
are so carefully watched that it is i'm
possible for any person to enter the
town from any locality where smallpox
is believed to exist. In Garden bottom
in Yell county, the disease is spreading,
some families now having as many as
five cases. The town of Oardanell is
Quarantined, men guarding every road
leading in from the Garden bottom dis
trict
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
HALL ON HOLMES FIELD.
$175,OOO of the Pierce Bequest to
Harvard Will Build an En-
cheering Hall

Cambridge, Mass, Feb. At meet
ing of the faculty of Harvard university
yesterday afternoon it was decided to
expend $175 900 of the Henry l.. Pierce
bequest in the erection of a new build
ing. Two-thirds of the building will be
devoted to the courses offered by the de-
partment of engineering in the Law
renee scientific school, the remaining
third to such college uses as may be
hereafter determined.
The building of Pierce hall may be
said to be the final step in the system of
combining the scientific departments of
Harvard to that section of Cambridge
north of Kirkland street which was be
gun by the erection of the Agassiz mu-
scum and the Jefferson physical labora-
tory. The building will be situated on
Holmes field, fronting on Oxford street,
and with Walter Hastings hall will form
a new quadrangle, thus making Holmes
field, famous in the past for athletics,
a college yard.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
COL. MOONLIGHT VERY ILL.
He Had Serious Hemorrhage Tues
dav Night, But is Better Today.

Leavenworth, Feb. 4.-Col. Thomas
Moonlight, who has been seriously i'll
since Tuesday night, was better today
He had been suffering with grip for
about three weeks and was out for
awhile Tuesday, returning in the after
noon to the home of his daughter, Mrs
E. E. Murphy. About 10 O'Clock that
night he was taken with a fit of cough
ing which resulted in a severe hem
orrhage from the lungs. The flow of
blood was so copious as to cause faint
ness and in falling Col. Moonlight re-
ceived several bruises.
Col. Moonlight's condition was con-
sidered alarming for awhile. so much
so, that his son-in-law, E. E. Murphy,
was telegraphed for, arriving today.
Friends of the ex-miniSter now hope for
his continued Improvement.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
GIRL CATTLE THIEF FINAL
When Her Sentence Was Affirmed
She Returned Voluntarily
to Oklahoma

Perry, Okla, Feb. 4-Miss Lottie
Kretchner, aged Is, whose home was
near Mangum, Oklahoma, has been sent
to the penitentiary for five years for
cattle stealing She was accused with
her lover, Allan Cook The latter
victed and sentenced. She appealed
and in the meantime gave bonds and
went to Denver Col, to live
The conviction was affirmed, and Miss
kretchner's bondsmen notified her that
she must come back and serve out her
sentence. The girl wrote them to send
her the railway fare and she would
meet the officers at the penitentiary
By SO doing, she said, she would protect
her honor and save her lover
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
AN OFFICIAL VACANCY
In the General Land Office Brings
Out a Number of Candidates.

Washington, Feb. A lively contest
is on for the assistant commissioner
ship of the general landof1ce, which
Frank w. Mondell of Wyoming, who
has been elected to congress, will va
cate on March 4. Mr.. Mondell will pre-
sent his resignation very soon and sew
eral candidates are in the field. Elk
Governor Richards of Wyoming, who
has the advantage of geographical To-
cation and of familiarity with land Of
flee work through some years expert
ence as surveyor general of the state,
has been urged on the president and is
strongly backed. Ex-Representative
Anderson of Tennessee, former chief
clerk of the general land office Is among
the other candidates.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
JUDGE HOOK MODEST.
He Requests That There Be No Pub
lie Demonstration.

Leavenworth, Feb. 4.-Word was re-
ceived from Judge Hook today that he
had observed in the newspapers it was
intended to give him pubic reception
at the depot upon his arrival home and
that his wishes would best be observed
in avoiding any public display.
He goes on to say that he appreciated
the kindness that suggested the thought
hut that if wouldp rove less embarraSS-
ing to him to have no public denonstra-
ton upon his arrival.
AS a consequence of this information
the committee who had been delegated
by the Business Mems club to make ar
engagements for his reception at the de-
not has declared all arrangements off.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
RHEUMA1I ISM.

No disease that attacks the human body so uaver-
sal as rheumatism
Almost everyone is liable suffer from it, in
form other.
Exhaustion of nerve force is the underlying
The Immediate is the presence of certain NOR
bid waste material in the blood and tissues.
Rheumatism in several forms; there is acute
rheumatism rheumatic fever there is what is termed
rheumatism. There is chronic muscular, in
hammatory deforming rheumatism and there is rheum-
attic govt
Over-work or whatever induces n undue exhaustion
of force will aggravate the disease hasten its
appearance
The aches that accompany the disease in its incipent
stages often for time attributed to other less ser
The cure for so deep-seated trouble be an
ignorant preparation that will only dull the pain give
temporary relief There a thousand and
called medicines for rheumatism that not only
effect cure, but unfortunately often the of
discouragng people who use them
Panes celery compound is as little related to these
worthless preparations honest gold coin is to
clumsy counterfeit.
Panes celery compound is specific for the of
rheumatism in any of its forms.
The first friendly pain "-friendly because it gives
early notice before serious mischief has occurred should
send you to the druggists for bottle of this
remedy. It will your rheumatism It will so
cleanse nvigorate and the blood that every
organ of the body will share Immediately in the healthier
condition 1t will build up and make you strong. Its
peculiar ability increase the amount of blood and
stimulate the action OF the liver and kidneys has made
the regular prescription of the best physicians
Thousands of people have been cured of rheumatism
by Paine's celery compound.
Mrs. H. c. Danolds, of Rochester, N. Y, writes:
Last season had a attack of muscular rheu-
matism At first used good deal of liniment but in
spite of it the rheumatism increased then began using
Panes celery compound and the second bottle cured
completely recommend Paines celery compound most
heartily invaluable remedy to all who afflicted
Other people-scores of them in every town of any
size in the country have written similar letters apPrec
alive and grateful the propretors of this wonderful
remedy-the best of all blood purifiers and restorers
the discovery OF Dartmouths greatest professor.
Whoever has used it has recommended it to others.
And that is the that the demand for Paine's
celery compound is greater today than for other
remedy in the world.
The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1899-02-04
Clothing for a K. N. G. Co.

Manhattan, Feb. 4.-Captain w. E.
Leicester has received orders from Gov
ernor Stanley to make requisition for
new clothing for company I, K. n. G.,
of this place About 40 of the boys who
formerly belonged to company I and
volunteered during the war will return
to the old company and the remainder
CT the 81 men Will be recruited,