The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1899-07-05
BILL SMITHS COURTSA|P
BY J. r. Mcvay.
A Georgian's Method of Dispos'
ing of His Rival.

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q Talk erbout gittin married, fellers."
y aid Bill Smith to some of the boys
4 ..,oupcd around the stove in the post
y ottcc the other day. ''ef ye hav' az
a much trouble with yer courtin NJ did
8 ,onIl ricomember hit az long az yc
q We
& What wuz yer 'spericncc, Bill?"
Il cuimcd in several voices. "Tell us
. e.boilt hit.
A .IIt WIZ erlong in the fall Nv the
81 ,ecr, crbout sorgum time, when my
,r,uble kummenccd," said Bill. Down
i &, ,Jcems Dostcr'S the nabOrs there
81 .Dous had been a-grindin Nv ther
Il eauc. an forwards ther tnil end wv the
4 week hit wuz Civ out that thar wuz
a I, hr er candy pullin an shindig at
4 T,.,ms' home Saturday mite. The VIM
4 zen folks made big preparations fer er
i ,ionstrous Quiltin endurin NV the day.
q ar tho whole thing WIZ ter wind up
With the frolic ut mite.
4 Now, thar WIZ er gal in ther sittle-
Il .ent by the name NV Nancy Parker
Il Snc WIZ cr dartcr Nv OIL Coon Parker
a Who used ter trap game m sich like up
4 On the Connysaugy river. thought
re sun riz an sat in Nancy's eyes. fer
4 she WIZ the purtiest thing thet ever
wlre caliker. luved her wusser than
q luvcd possum an inter, an you uns
j lncws possum an taters IL too good ter
4 talk crbout. We he'd fallin out, how
sumcver. crbout er feller by the name
4 UT Gus Burke, who he'd kun in ter the
4 aaborhood ter teech skule. an I had
aot been ter see her in sim time until
i onc mite 1es' afore the frolic went
over to her house. Nancy WIZ out at
Tier cowpen a-milkin, an az walked
A ap / sed:
: Hello. Nancy!
4 why, hello, Bill! Ye are nuff ter
a care ther sore eyes. Whar in the
y round world hev ye bin keepin yer
4 self:'
"'Oh, I've bin worlin over Mt the
4 sorgum mill purity much all day an Nv
4 Mites, an jes' slipped Off ter run over
zcrc an Ak yc If could take yc ter the
8 >hntiig III Jcems DOrstcr's tern0rTow
] aitc.'
4 Wcll-er-er-Bill,' says she, Gus WIZ
4 over here-I mean he wuz passin by
tic house las mite, an he sed az how
] led be glad ter cum by an take me
OYER thar, IN tole him all rite
'''Ye tole him all rite, did ye?'
Yes. Yer know, Bill. thet ther
saod book says first cum first sarved.'
j First cum thunder! Hain't lived
n l,IrnoIa,,fo o11 M Y, n JfFo0,
j "'Yaas.'
'Hain't bin hawlin wood over ter
4 Their sittlement an spendin my hard
j earned money fer candy, IN sich like
4 fer ye?'
"'Yaas.'
Now. this is what git fur hit.
I Long Gums flonpyeered. bowlegged,
whamplc jawed feller. with hiz ha'r
combed like las yecr's jaybird's nest,
Il an yc are jes' as sweet NJ pie ter him.
q I'd like ter know what bizness he's got
4 heer anyhow
why, Bill. he's cr-goin ter teach
Sam Bcason's plnce. 1 thort you know
ed thet. An they do say he's a nifty
1 5nc feller.'
WHO sez so? I'll bet er load Nv the
aes' chestnut wood on the mountain
that you're the only oge.'
Nov, Bill, ye oughtn't ter git so
4 :calous.' .5
Jealous thunder! Who's Jealous?
Hit only makes dandcr rize ter see one
I w them city upstarts cum out here an
4 run over folkes jes' cause he's got on
store clothes. They don't make him
4 20 better'n we uns. but burned sight
.wusscr, I'm thinkin.'
"'Well, Bill. we shouldn't judge pee
ile by tlleir 'pearance.
"'No, / guess. not, fer ef we did he'd
cr-bin in the chain gang two minutes
atter set my eyes on him. Well, j
] mus be a-gwinc I've got ter git up
soon in tho mornin an finish hawlin
I shet new groun' cane ter the MILL. So
goodby. Nancy
'Goodby, ff you call thet gone. 1
never seed you in -slch hurry befo'.
William.
"'Oh, kin stay here tell daybreak
ct hit suits you.,'
II doh't want ter keep ye." she said.
Hits gittin bedtime anyway an she
"hisked inter the house without even
so much az a-lookin at me.
Il TUX d nigh cut frum thar thru the
woods ter Jim Lnnd's store. Hit wuz
ther only store fur miles Ground. an
Nv mites the boys Nv ther .nnborhood
would meet thar an while they set
Ground on the cracker boxes er whit
tin ull tell Jokes, an funny stories.