The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1899-02-08

oenSlbiNe-uOI Is IL you consult Con-
rad Schmitdeil."
Quirk lost no time in sending
stamps to the publisher of Peppers
Gazette for canvassing outfit, which
arrived in the course OF few DAYS.
Once possessed of his implements of
navigation, he determined to embark
upon his sea of trouble at once.
1T is the crucible that purites the
gold." thought he, land it will be
through hardship that 1 am cured of
my maladies of disposition.
The sample copy of the Gazette pre-
sented very handsome appearance,
and, as Quirk gazed upon it, he con-
graduated himself on his choice.
Once started on his tour, the nervous
gentleman reconnoitred for suitable
street on which to operate. A long
avenue, lined with houses occupied by
people of the middle-class, attracted
his attention, and there it was that he
began the actual work.
The first house was plain brick
building, and under ordinary condi-
tions he would not have given it a
second thought, if, indeed, it received
a first one. Now, however, it loomed
up appalling, and Quirk pictured
dark, gloomy rooms for the imprison-
ment of agents.
He remained in front Of the house
for at least ten minutes before he
raised sufficient courage to climb the
steps and ring the bell. His hands
were shaking, and he toyed nervously
with the paper which he carried. At
the last minute Lis small amount of
nerve failed him and he fled ig-
ANONYMOUSLY, but not in time, for the
lady of the house opened the door just
as he reached the street.
YOU'RE nice one," said she, cup
to the tricks of boy, bringing people
to the door by ringing the bell!' And
she disappeared.
ga lucky escape" said Quirk;
"she is regular tartar. I'm glad /
didn't stay, but she inferred that 1
rang the bell to bring her to the door.
How inconsiderate some people arel"
Fearing another encounter with the
lady of the first house he skipped
four, and clenohing his fists determin-
edly, mounted the stairs before a COM
Portable frame dwelling.
This time he stood his ground. and
waited for whoever or whatever should
appear. 1t proved to be very lady
like person, and when she stood on
the threshold and looked inquiring
at Quirk, he remained speechless
for moment. Suddenly it dawned
upon him that people don't ring door
bells and stand on steps unless they
have an errand.
Madam, " said he, trying hard not
to stammer, ~ represent Popper's
Gazette" He took a sidelong glimpse
at the paper to assure himself that he
had rightly named it. 81 should be
pleased to enter your subscription at
the rate of one dollar a year. I say 1
should be pleas ed to enter -"
slQuirk's nervousness was almost the
cause of his undoing. The lady
pursed her lips in that distant manner
so exasperating to sensitive person.
Besides, you see, she was lady.
81 don't care for Peppers Gazette, 4"
said she, quietly, yet with q plainly
discernible sneering infection, "aud |
1 never purchase anything from
agents"
Quirk stood bolt upright, his hands |
at his sides, his face pale, awaiting
her further utterance. Nothing more |
came, however, and the lady retired, |
closing the door, and, to Ouirk's |
great chagrin, locking it as well.
That was the unkindest cut of all.
But the thing had to be done.
Quirk knocked bravely at the door of
the next house. No one responding.
he pounded harder. Soon steps were
heard in the hall, and George found
confronting frowsy-looking
man who wore no collar, and whose
hair suggested very recent sojourn
in bed. The mans eyes were about
half closed, and he assumed a frowp
deep and intense.
"What the deuce do you want?"
said he.
81 represent Peppers Gazette,
magazine" And Quirk hes
itatingly advanced the sample.
''You blasted agent" almost
screamed the sleepy man. 'T'd like
10 hang your whole tribel Waking a
fellow up to show him your con-
founded Peppers Gazette, or some
darn thing"
81 am sorry to have disturbed you,"
replied Mr.. Quirk. 'I say am sorry
TO have disturbed you."
"Well, 1 heard you. Look here,
our number is four-thirty-four. Mark
it down, and don't you never come
here with your papers. If you do, by
iinksl I'll lay you out. 4"
"Sir," said Quirk, ''you are no
gentleman.
81 don't care for what you say. 1
. 4 T