The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1899-01-11

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-Chicsgo News
HIS SURRENDER.
When a widow puts notice in her
window TO the effect that there is ac-
commodation within for a respectable
single man it usually means mischief
It is the old, old Invitation of the spi-
der to the fly. How on earth could
mere, ordinary, inexperienced, guile
less single man be otherwise than clay
in the hands Of Mrs. Potter?
Originally Whelks, she had marri-
ed in the first place Higson and in the
second the late but unduly nnlamented
Potter.
The grass on the grave of the latter
having now begun to grow quite luxu-
riantly, the relict considered that TO re-
main a widow any longer would be
sheer waste of time and opportunity;
hence the card-6 inches by 4-with the
announcement referred to.
"The rest said Mrs. Potter, 81
leaves to Providence"
And Providence, thus piously invok-
ed, responded with Joshua Jebbings.
He was an unassuming individual,
was Joshua, and so was conscious at
times Of vague presentiinent that this
was condition Of affairs too good TO
last. 1t was Joe Whibble who first
opened his eyes to the snare that was
being spread FOR him.
Reckon ye'll be for putting up the
bans fore long," remarked this wor-
thy, with a significant wink.
"BansF' exclaimed Joshua. II amt
got nothink TO do with no bans,
amt"
Unabashed by the array of negatives,
Joe executed another wink of even
deadlier significance, but eontented
himself with the skeptieal mohosyl-
liable "G'arn.n
This was all that passed at that time,
but Joshua went home with the Omin-
Gus word bans ranking in his
breast.
He was very silent over his tea, ex-
cepi when bone went the wrong way.
His landlady Kept an intermittent
watch on him out Of the corner OF her
eye.
'Its about time ! give i'm int. )"
she thought. Times getting on, and
Whitsuntide'd do as well as not"
1t was at this moment that Mr.. Jeb-
bings, looking up, caught her eye. But
for the poison instilled into his mind
by Joe whibble il is probable that he
would have seen nothing particular in
it As il was, It seemed 10 look ''bans'
at him-whieh was worse than dag
gers. Mr.. JebbiDgs chOked again, part
ly from emotion and partly owing to
another misdirected fish-bone-
Mrs. Potter sighed sigh of fond
reminiscence.
~ declare, if you don't remind me
for all the world Of Higson. Wonder
full one he we're to choke. I've know
ed him to go black in the face over
red herring. And more'n once he's
brought my heart into my mouth with
apple core. But, for all that, he lived
to die in his bed"
AS soon as supper was over Joshua
slipped out and sought soIace and secu-
rity at the Ham aod Chicken. Joe was
there, and TO him Mr.. Stebbings-after
the usual interchange of opinions on
the weather, the crops and the price of
pigs-put poser.
"S'posin' wid-that is, wom-
leastways female makes up her mild
TO marry a man and he won't have her,
what then?r
"As a gin'ral rule responded the
oracle, after seeking Inspiration at the
bottom of his blue and white earthen-
ware pint mug,-''as gin'rai rule she
marries him all the same"
Mr.. Jebbings rasped his chin des-
pondently with the back of his hand
"Ain't there no way of choking her
olF?" he asked desperately.
depends whether she's single or a
widder," replied Joe, with an express
sion Of deep meaning.
"S'pose we allows. just for the sake O.
argument, as she is widder."
aThen," said Joe, slowly and en-
phatieally, "my advice is, 'ook it,"
Joshua Jebbings quilted the Ham
and Chicken strung up to the pitch of
giving his landlady weeks notice
By the time he reached the corner of
his road his resolution was oozing fast
There was hardly vestige of it left as
he raised the latch.
The first thing that met his too con-
scious gaze was Mrs. Potter.
"If it's all the same to you," put in
Mr.. Jebbings, with considerable trepi-
dation-"if it's eli the same to you, Z
Pm thinking Of leaving you this day
week if-if no objection" he concluded
laInely.
"BIess us and save US alIF' exclaimed
Mrs. Potter.
's6oo good night" answered Mr..
Jebbings, executing a retrograde move
ment in the direction of the staircase
Never mind about getting me can
die, and-I shan't be wanting any sup
per-"
"Here, you come back
The words foated after him and had
the effect of making him quicken his
steps.
ssThank goodness, that's overF' be
thought as be bolted himself in- 81
wish next week was over and done
with, too. Wonder whether she's TAX
ing on much7''
Somebody's bin and put him up to
THU" !" reflected the lady. "Weil, after
ali, dunno's it matters much"
Tt was four-roomed house, two down
Tmma r -