The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1899-04-14
BUREAU DRAWERS.

"How absurd" says somebody; "as
though there were anything to be said
upon so trivial sulect!''
That somebody evidently has not
read the ingeniously fascinating four
pages which DR.. Holmes wrote con-
| cerning cart wheel. And if that
somebody bureau drawer had "balk-
ed for five minutes, resisting all per-
suasions, and had then yielded with an
impetus which sent its victim rceling
with q dislocated kncepan, there would
be a revision Of sentiment which would
cause that somebody to say, "Let a
volume be written upon bureau draw
ers, and let it consist strictly of exple-
tiv.s.
Gail Hamilton no doubt had bureau
drawers in mind when she wrote that
chapter on "the total depravity of in
animate things"
II know it is woman writing"
again says somebody. Ofcourse it is!
What man knows anything about bu-
reaus! Haven't You kept your hus-
bands chifonier in perfect order ever
since You married him? His flannels
in the lower drawer ; niehtshirts in the
one above; linen shirts next above
that; hose in the next: neckties, gloves
and handkerchicfs in the next collars,
cuffs and various buttons in the upper
drawer. Aud if he wants shirt or q
handkerchief, doesn't he open and toss
over every drawer but the right one
before he finds it
This, however, is excusable in a
man who is weighted with care, and in
boys whose physical vigor is generally
too riotous for little, orderly details.
A friend of mine went recently to
visit her son in college. After she had
been the rounds of sight seeing, and
had enjoyed Bohemian spread with
some of the "fellows," she was about to
depart: and was expressing pleasure in
her visit, when they shouted, 80, you
mustn't go till you've seen Billy's
drawers" She opened her eyes, but
they dragged her into the next room,
where they took by surprise a tall
young fellow in his shirt sleeves, with
his feet on the mantelpiece.
"Say, Billy, may we come in they
politely said, after they had made
themselves at home ave want to
show Mrs. ---- your drawers" ""Billy"
gracefully acknowledged the introduc-
tion, and laughingly explained: "Those
chaps can never get over it that don't
keep my letters in the water pitcher
and my socks in the scrap basket ;
they think they are going to take me
by surprise sometime, but everything
is all right to day. I'm their prize
side show And he obligingly pulled
open drawer after drawer, which were.
indeed, as neat as pin.
Yes, | am a woman, and | keep my
bureau drawers in order. Well,
must except the upper drawer, which
does have q way of getting topsy-tur-
Wy. Yours does too; if you smell
something burning, or hear Teddy
suddenly screamed, you don't stand on
the order of your going, but thrust
anything and everything into the
bureau drawer, and fly. And there
are so many little clippings and stray
poems that you must save to show
John when he gets home, so those are
just tucked into the upper drawer.
This may be carried too far.
| have friend who saves so many
newspapers and clippings that she re-
ally hasn't room for her clothes, which
are spread round the room promiscu-
ously.
consider bureau the test and the
revelation of character.
When | see cotton satin pincusll-
ion (and such a one proclaims itself as
! fat with sawdust) its tawdry lace cover
stuck with ninety innocent stick pins;
plated silver toilet articles, and the
mirror bordered with the reigning IA
vorites, know perfectly we'll that the
| bureau drawers contain heteroge-
neous assortment of coarse Hamburg
edgings, and that the upper drawer
will display a ribbon-bound glass glove
box (said glove box containing soiled
ribbons, Old letters, concert programs,
an odd garter buckle, lcadlcss lead
pencil, and two CT three visiting cards
But if | see 4 dainty muslin pincush-
ion, whose lignt puf1iness announces
itself all wool, and brushes whose in
expensive back permits frequent,
wise renewing, while on the mirror S
edge | see the bright quotation for the
day, or a quaint old German proverb
to be memorizcd while the hair is
brushed, then know that ruflles and
dainty hemstitching would refresh my
eyes if | should look behind that curved