The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1899-06-01
STORYETTES.

two horses, and will pick and shuck
eight acres of corn in day. Think of
it, sir! 1t lightens the farmers labors,
it makes the toll of corn husking a
mere pastime and"
"Huh! 1 don't see how! That ERE
ding FILTERED machine don't kiss the
girl every time it finds a read ear, does
it?"-Harper's Bazaar.
81 have heard some very romantic
stories about your successes" SAID the
young woman, as she looked out OF the
corners of her eyes and adjusted her
mouth so as to make dimpleS.
"Yes?" responded Senator Sorghum,
with compIacent smile.
at has been intimated to me that
you have made money out of politics.
But of course one doesn't have to be-
lieve everything one hears
"Well, these silver people did so bad
ly when they tried to make politics out
of money. dunno's man would be to
blame for turnin' the experiment the
other way around"
And then another person told me
that you got your very first start in
life as a curbstone faker."
That's libelous."
Il thought So"
absolutely false! The way / got
my first start was this: l had farm
Iiob nnn6
thing else, so got it surveyed and
had maps printed and opened an office
and sold the whole thing off in lots.
Pm not a man of small enterprises.
When | start out to do anything L do
it with a will. AS soon as made up
my mind to fake, faxed whole town.
Wouldn't stop with a curbstone."
o II
The teacher discovered that very
small boy, not more than five years old,
was chewing gum, and she ordered him
out and babe him disgorge it.
81 can't" he said.
"You can't?" she answered, in sur
prise, "why, yes you car, and you
mustr
"No, can't" he persisted, and kept
the gum in his mouth.
"Now, why can't you give me that
gum, johnny" the teacher asked.
Because" said Johnny, stOutly, cit
belongs to little girl in Somerville!-
Boston Transcript.
OxO
In Hull recently a little girl was in
yited to party at a friends house.
After tea different games were engaged
in until it was time to go home. AS
She guests we're leaving, the hostess
offered the little girl bun.
"No, thank you, ma'am," said the
girl; Il could not eat any more"
The hostess then told her to put it in
her pocket.
Il can't" replied the mite, "it's full
already; but the next time 1 come l
will bring basket" Times.
*
He was the new pastor and found it
somewhat difficult to get acquainted
with his flock.
On his way home after his first SER
mon he overlook cOmely young
woman whom he recognized as one Of
his congregation.
She greeted him with smile and he
felt embolden to talk to her seriously.
81 was glad" he said, "to see you in
church. 1t always gratifes me greatly
to observe young person voluntarily
seeking the one true haven"
Excuse me-" interrupted the girl
with Sigh blush, "you haven't got the
name quite right. It's Havens, Jim
Ravens. He passes one of the plates
Then the pastor changed the subject
Minneapolis Tribune.
o%o
A Chicago clergyman some weeks
back was visiting one of his humble
friends. The wife received him. They
talked for short time, when the gooC
woman said: ooh, sir, have you seer
our new dog? Such beauty, and he''
got a name after dog in the Bible"
81 shall be very glad to see 1T" sal(
the parson. "But I don't remember ;
dog mentioned in the Bible which hat
name..'
Dear me-" said the woman. 81 di'
think as how, you clergyman, nigh
known it. Don't yer know what the
say about poor Lazarus? How More
over the dog came and licked hi
sores? So we called i'm Moreover, w
aid."-Fun.
A Death Warrant-1798. Wherea
James O'Coigley having been attainte