West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1899-12-28
MR. BROONSEDGE BREAkS LOOSE iGlN.
He Describes A Runaway and Re-
ports the Details With SCrUpu-
lOuS Care.

matter of fact form. But whom your
correspondent, after going over his
letters with the object Of striking out
every statement which looks the least
bit crooked, is told his attempts TO tell
the news are taken as jokes, il Is
enough to raise a scowl ON a copper
tocd hycna. However, put back my
Indignation long on~ugh to ask the
leading men of Kiugwood, for a tcsti-
moniOl OF character, They gave il
with no more coaNing than the average
girl requires to bc induced to have a
hcaptng dish of | scream. Here it is.
Kiugwood, Buckwhcat Co.,
". Va, Dee. 10, lS0o
To Whom 1t May Concern
Know all men, women and children,
bY these mot ChriStmas) presents,
thusly, to witty aud morcoverlv:
This is To certify that Col Icph1niah
Broomscdgc, Of parsuip Corner. has 10
license, duly signed by the Judge OF
Circus Court, authorizing him 10 tell
the truth from the 3lst day of Dccem-
Der To the lst day OF January We re-
sent ;hc doubts as 10 the reliability OF
his letters, aud we assure the public
that they are just IA true at one time
ns another.
The signatures OF the aforesaid lead
ing men ought TO come next, but after
the paper was handed in at TuE ARGUS
stlicc, and before it could bc put in
Print the Office goat found it and
chewed mp the list OF names.
thought it an imposition on the good
nature of The public to ask the people
TO sign the paper again, aud so I give
IL as it is.
The news report this week was told
me bY one who was brought MP 60 be-
hcvc it is wicked TO tell any lies OF
course had TO use my imagination
somewhat in filing in the details but
being now fortified by the Endorsement
OF tho men OF the town, hope oyery
one viii see keep close 10 the facts
with the straightness Of a corn row ON
Il rocky hillside.
Two young men Of Pleasant District,
whose names may be Charles ana Jud.
undertook TO return buggy by hand
TO the neighbor's house where 10 be-
longed. Like many other undertake
ings, this one went all right for u
while. Then, while going down "A
slope, Jud's long legs got to moving
too fast for the procession, and Charles
buckcd against him 10 reduce the
speed. But the buggy insisted on go-
ing on like the car OF progress. Ind's
heels slipped in Il muddy spot, aud he
went down Charles accommodating
did the same, and the buggy new on
over them to the foot OF the slope
Before Jud could get mp, his long feet
standing mp iu the moonlight, we're
mistaken for two little boys who were
being hunted for by their watchful
parent
Jeremiah. Jehosaphat n You
two little scalawags don't get pow
erful big move on YOU and hurry home.
IN warm yon up with fence rail"
But as ne saw Jul strctch himself up
by sections like "a spy glass, be- mutt
tered his disgust.
There IL is again. Nigh, have
known IT, Got fooled once more ou
Jud's long feet
Leaving tho father Of Jeremiah and
Jehosaphat to hunt somewhere else.
the young men went in pursuit Of the
buggy the shafts Of which had been
plowing furrow iu the road. The
buggy overlook COW. and az the same
moment % sudden jerk caused the
shafts TO spring up TN they found
resting place ON the cows horns. The
COW remembered she was yaltiug TOO
slowly, but the buggy kept after her
like Gen. Lawton after Aguinmdo
40 the foot of the bill they parted com-
DanY, and the buggy shafts would
hayerun into tla baul, IL they had not
pinncd TO the ground % blind dog thai
was too slow 60 get out Of the way
The boy freed thc dog and began to
draw the buggy onward a little
farther ou vas another slopc and iu
going over smooth boulder .bs bug
gy forced them into another run
-See there" said Charles "1here's
a .lcerin The road ahead OF us lla
can't get out Tor there's bauI, on
each side Wen make him draw lhe
buggy. Lets Jump onto h.s blc.a Jui
You hold tHc shafts, andI'li hold the
steers horns and guide hiu."
This arrangement was carried out.