Evening journal., 1899-02-04
BILL JONES SURPRISED
CONTINUED from First Page)

bin we'd a-had to hav Civ up the hte.
I'm a holdin' up that Dili 6uyin'
typewriter fur the stait insurance
commissioner. Hit don say IN the bin
as to wciher the typewriter is to be
a blonde OF a brunei, an wan him
TO git jes' wat he wants wgee he's
about hit
We wus al serprist to-aay TO git let
ters frum q feler nameu Howard De-
Ross, OF Wilmington. askin' us to git
together an elect a Yoonited Stats
seniter SO as how he or sum other fel-
Ter By the same name could be nome
rated fur mayor Of that municipality.
Ne CANT fin out as hoo THIS teller IS.
Stait Trsshurer Ross sez ais how he
hahn no kin TO him ef ne KNOWS hit
One Of the seniters tol' me ne dldn'
no hoo Ross wuz. but ef he coWd
FIN out his address he'd dlay half the
expense Of buyin' Darrei OF salt 90
sen to him to cure his freshness.
didn notis as how this fe,ler Rosses
letters dun ennything flrenern change
the vote of them free silver feAers
frum Chanseller Nicholson to John
Gee Gray, an I've hearn tell as how
they wuz agoin' 70 do nit ennyway
wen aroun' among the Waste baeiuts
to-day an foun i9 Of them Ross let
ters witch had bin misplaced by maiis
afore-thai. Mister Ross addresses the
Republican members as mi 0ele feller-
partisansi" an now everybody IL mad
because he didn' jes say ''Fel.ersl"
Seniter Pile run acrost some soop to-
day as Civ him the surprise OF his life
Vile he wusn looln' Representative
Frszzle poored into nil about haif a
pint Of terbasco eawse an Sentter
Blakely added a pint OF strong vinegar
Wen Seniter pile begun vaiin' that
soop nobody didn' hav' TO tell him
wen be had enuf Hit dawned on him
al OF a suddin as how he didn' wan no
soop fur dinner nohow.
hav' foun' ont wot's the re.e trub-
Bile between Hyou C. Browne an j..
Edwlrd Addicks. Mister Browne wuz
edukated at the Conference Academy
and Mister Addicks wuz edukated at
he Cawcuss Institoot. Mister Browne
wants to hop conferences an the time
an Mister Addicks won hol nuthin'
but cawcusses. tell you, Mary Ann.
there's all the difference IN the worlf in
the way fellers edukated an hits
wunderful as how these here literary
fel.ers Will stick up fer there own eol-
edges.
Mary Ann, ! notdst Sitty Cownsil-
man Smith an Bahff Rine down yere
frum Wilmington to-day. CESS the
ether fellers mus be sick. Ef they
hahn down tomorrow I'm goin' to
commence to dock 'em' fur los time
an wasted opportunities.
Mister Abbitt has made his MAIDEN
speech in the Senit, an ef the Della
ware Hysterical Sassiety don max,
him an honorary member hit awt tc
lose hits charter. / wuz in the lobby
Wen hit cum of, an / wisht yo' cou't
a heard hit, Mary Ann He's a good
iookin' feller. an wen he's filed up L,
the neck with elokwence hits an in
splrin' site. Wen / wen in he WI,
fellin' the feilers sumthin about wo
we dun at the dinner table up In Filly
uelha, an sed as how all big thing
iur the publick good was dun will
d7ner wnz being et. I wuz jes abou
to ask him wot cum out(en our Dime
but a big Nll fur Mister Addiclss d,
pay. Wen I reckolected as how / wuzn
q member Of the SenIt. an 80 had Z.
kepe my mouth shet. He tor Semitic
Nox as how he wuz a desendent O
John Nox the reformer. an Mlste
Nox's Ease lifted up, an he began ritz
away 10 draw up a bill fur reform il
the insurance department OF the state
Thea Mister Abbit toll Seniter Hart a
how his desendent. Peter Hart. wu
the furst man TO git a and grant frun
the Dook Of York Mister Hart lene,
over TO Seniter Mawl an sed. Il wun
der how hit Gums that Mister Abbit
Knows 50 much about my family al
fares?" Before Seniter Mawl coul
anser. Mister Abbitt sed as how Miste
Mawl's desendent. John Mawl, wuz tn
attorney wot drawed the deed fur tina
Ian. Senited Mawl turned to Semitic
Hart an sed: Il don think Pete Hai
ever pade John Mawl fur DRAWN tina
deed. an 50 I'll hav to hold you fu
the BILL Seniter Harz sez: "Ef yo
sue me fur hit III set up defense a
how yore claim Is cut out by the sta.
yoot ov limmytashun." An then the
wuz interrupted by Senlter Abbitt te
lin Seniter Shakespere as how he WI
descended frum the French Hugeenot
an Seniter Shakespere turned roui
20 Seniter Nox an sed: "Pariee vo
Frawnsay?" Hit kinder nettled Mi
ter Nox to be called anything IN
that. an he sed: Il hahn a fitil
man. The res ov them fellers WI
waitin' to here sumthin' about the
pedigrees, farenhks. wen seniter A,
bit stopt. They hlt slited an We
hit cum to a vote on the amendmel
g1vin' the Delaware Hysterical Sass
ETY. five hundred dollers, insted