The Norfolk weekly news. (Norfolk, Neb.) 1888-1900, 1899-11-09
MIR. EPIZOOT WILKINS.
He Finds ga Disturbin Element nv
Unusual Magnitood" In the Propo-
sition TO Nominate Admiral Dewey
as the Democratic Candidate For
President.
BURo wv
WASHINGTON, ID. G.
Tu the Editur

BURo wv INFERMAsHUN,
WASHINGTON, ID. G.
tn the Editur:
A nu and disturbin element, NV unusual
magnitood, hez bin fired intu these Dimi-
cratic headquarters hi sum onthinkin pee
pie hoo don't realize whit kind NV a sir
kus tina air %startin. | allood tn the move
ment " sum Dimicrats in Moo York and
luther places tn nominate Admiral George
Dewey ez our candidate fer president
next ~yeer-after we hev indooccd a lot NV
our people tn swallcr their convicshuns
and nominate William J. Bryan. The
project fell like a bumshell intu our
midst, and it cum so suddinly we don't
quite kno WHARF we air at. or course
the name thing IL tn elect a Dimicratic
president hoo we kin depend upon tn
properly distribit the Offices. Everything
else kin pla second fiddle. SO fer ez the
man IL conserved it don't make no differ
encc. We kin vote fer ~ennybuddy we
air told tn vote fer without askin emmy
qu~estyuns-cz we did wen Horace Gree
ley wuz the Dimicratic candidate.
Admiral Dewey hez no record tibet
wood kommend itself tn a Moo Gersey
Dimicrat-or one tibet wood create en-
thoosiasm in Tammany Hall or the slums
NV Moo York. He hez dun nothin fer us
in the wa NV stuttin ballot boxes, er gittin
votes kountcd rite on the mite Nv cleo
shun. He hain't attended convenshuns,
nor taken the stump fer us, nor ritten
no letters tn arouze us tn acshun, nor
kounted out the Niger vote wharcver he
Good find 1t. l am afrade tibet the ground
wurk Nv a troo Dimicrat amt in him.
Thet liz the feelin NV the most Nv us at
headquarters, at present, but it liz subjeck
tn change, later on, if w think it best tn
nominate him. Hiz recepshun in Moo
York wuz a CRATE wun If it IL reckoned
bi fireworks and all kinds Wv noises in big
crowds. But hoo is Dewey frum a per-
litical standpoint? Thet's whit we want
tn kno before we go tn hoopin it up fer
him ez our candidate fer president. Hiz
antesedents air agin him. He Gums frum
Vermont. the most rabid Republican staff
in the kountry, WHARF applejack is scare
er than hens teeth, and WHARF a Dimi-
crat hez nothin tn hope fer. We hev no
record tibet he ever voted a Dimicratic
ticket, or ever thretened tn. The only
cumfortin thing we hev herd about him
IL tibet he writ a letter tn sumbuddy, last
yecr, tellin EN- tibet he warn't no Repub-
! likin. Kin sich a man be depended on
tn du the square thing hi the boys and
stick tn the party, rite or rong, like a
Moo Gersey Dimicrat? I'm afrade it's
a risky peece Nv bizness. fer he seems tn
hev moar regard fer the kountry than
mi party. The Dimicratic party coodn't
git along with tibet kind Nv a man. We
must hev sumbuddy hoo is fer the party
fust, last, and all the time.
Thare is anuthcr objecshun tn Admiral
Dewey. He il agin Ag~uinaldoo-hoo we
hev been p%raisin all over the kountry in
Dimicratic mcetin's and convenshuns ez
a second George Washington, hoo liz Mt
present engaged in dealin out liberty and
Independence in doses tn SCOT the Fill
peen Islanders. If we shout fer Aguinal-
doc how kin we hooray fer Dewey? The
2 noises wunt mix. We must keep up
the racket fer our Fillipeen ally even If
we hcv tn throw down an Amerikin ad-
miral. In alloodin tn Aguinaldoo ez a
man hoo wuz only a freight clerk tibet
didn't amount tn nothin, and wun hoo
wuz the tool NV uthers, Mr.. Dewey hez
tride tn discredit a good Dimicrat hoo IL
embarrassing sitooated and can't du ex-
actly ez he wood like tn. Tu speek litely
Nv n man hoo IL innokulated with so
menny Dimicratic prinsiples, liz not the
wa fer Admiral Dewey tn git the sim
patty and votes " Aguinaldoo's trends
in this kountry.
We don't kno WHARF he STAINS, on the
issoos we air tryin tn git rid uv-sum Nv
wich air alreddy ded and uthers on the
MO 80, Tho tNn,, Frhnnn T., pa t,ll;, hn,,
soon we ma hev tn dig EN- up, or tri tn
put nu life intu I'm. 1t wood be diskur-
rijin tn be obliged tn resurrect the free
silver issoo, jest ez we air gittin reddy tn
plant it, and then hev Admiral Dewey
declare hizself agin it.
Ez a whole it appeers tn me we he'd
better go slow about nominatin a man
hoo liz carryin around so menny oncer-
tainties with him and ST yin nothin about
it. 1t wood be embarrassin if he shood
turn out tn be n Republican, and it wood
be distressin tn shout fer him before we
found it out. Besides, how kin we ever
fergit tibet he IL in favur NV the unholy
and unconstitooshunal war witch IL bein
waged agin them tibet we simpathize with
in the F%illipeens, wen we hev wasted so
mulch ink in copyin resolooshuns agin it?
The Moo Workers hoo air putin up the
job tn nominate Dewey sa tibet he kin be
elected without half tryin, and | must sa
it looks tibet wa after reedin and heerin
about hiz recepshun Wherever he goze.
Tha sa it wood be a CRATE skeem tn nom
mate him and let the people holler and
hoorah him intu the White House, and
we Good save IA good deel Nv munney bi
the arrangement that Good be spent fer
drinks in bracein up and strengthenin
our constitooshuns That may all be
troo, but whut's the use NV electin a man
president if tharc IL emmy oncertinty
about how he IL goin tn act after he il
elected? Fer instance, if | shood go up
Ia the White House and Introduce sum
good Dimicrat, hoo wuZ not on speekin
terms with the muItiplicashun table, and
ask tn hey him appointed tn a hi posishun
r~equirin sun nollege NV tiggers, Good |
depend upon President Dewey tn appint
him? I'm afrade not. Good | rely upon
him tn put men intu offs hoo were prac-
tikal OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES hoo kno how
tn expand the Dimicratic vote Wen and
WHARF il IL most needed? Good we he