The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-08-27
EX-TANK II AS AN ACTOR.
TELLS THE CLUB OF Hrs GRIEVANCE
AGAINST SHAKEsPEARE.

Was Shanghnicd Into "homeo ana juliet
Performance TO Play Count Paris, and
the Audience at Minonk Put Him Out
of tho Business ON the Second Night.
"Without entertaining any desire 10 dcuac,
from the glamour with which posterty has invested
the genius OF tho Hard" remarked Ex-Tank No.
70 Of the Harlem Club OF Former Alcoholic Do
generates drumming with obvious unconscious.
ness on tho table with the fingers Of his left hand
so AZ 10 give the overhead lights chance TO bring
nut the beauty OF all the facets Of the fauluessly-
cut ok blue diamond on the third finger. "and
with no purpose or wish TO induce the members
of this club 10 change their prcconccived oGons
with reference to the Swan of Avon yet take
the liberty OF rising TO state that Bill undeniably
made a few bad breaks. I'm not speaking OF the
way he permitted Macbeth to wabble around and
allow himself to be bulldozed by his wife. nor of
his failure To land the Melancholy Dane in a nut
factory at the wind.up Of the play (there must
have been some kind of Bloomingdale outfit
in Denmark at that time for folks who had wheels),
nor Of the yellow finish he dished out TO Antony,
nor Of the four flushing talk he put into the mouth
of Coriolanua nor Of any OF the rest of the little
idiosyncracies in the writing of the Bard which
the pygmies since his day and date have called
attention to I'm Just throwing II into him a few
to sort a. square up personal grievance. I'm
sore on him because he heavcd some superhuous
characters into his plays, and Of these the super
nuouses was end is Count Paris In Romeo
and Juliet know that that parts supernuous
because we played il myself It's pretty unusual
thing for man to be Inundated through no less
a famous gazebu than William Shakespeare, but
that's Just what happened TO me Through
Shakespeare was made To feel like ten lien Tsin
tacls There was win out end 10 ii finally, but"
knock off talking like n man in a cave" urged
the club, gently. in chorus
You can't spreadcagle this outfit by going at a
talktest both ends from the middle" protested
FIX Tank No T. the pariamentaran and kicker
you're ten lengths behind your field Hunch up
and do some riding or you'll be beat a quarter of
q mile"
but resumed Ex-Tank No ~ where he
had left of tho thing left its Here's what
one Of the little Jay papers said about me" diving
into his vest pocket and producing a yellowed
clipping about stick long and reading:
The underfcd, reluctant tentative PROPOSE
ton in red cotton tights, a frayed green tunic OF
Nisigoth architecture. and Mexican SLOUGH ha,
minus the rim bells, who essaycd the role Of
Count Paris-well we frankly own TO being
up against II in the attempt which we had intend
ed To undertake TO describe this young mans
weird and wild Interpretation. Briefly. then, he
made the Bard look as II he had been hit on the
wishbone by a steamboat when he was writing
that part We doh our bonnets reverenuy at the
mere mention Of the great Singers name. and
yet we're bound to say that In our humble judg
ment he should have fixed IL so that Coun,
Paris could be kicked 10 death by rabbits in the
hrst act II may be that in the ranks OF Thcs-
plans there male bipeis capable OF assuming
the role OF the Count Of Paris and OF making that
pnhead look less like a zinc dime than he really
is in the play, but we doubt IL Assumed however
by man with the physique Of a hodcarrior and
tho grace and carriage OF cook trying to
climb a tree
Il object" interrupted tho parmentarian and
kicker. Il ask the members Of this organiza ton
and all, If this is a literary outfit or a club Of
bx-disciples Of the Demon Rum, and also inquire
when we may expect TO have some mug get UP
here and try TO hcave 'Curfew Shall Not Ring
Tonight into us? What's the"
1T happened in Minonk. Illinois," went on Ex
Tank No. IL, carefully returning the clipping tc
his vest pocket late in the autum of so. II
Isn't germane to the main incident what was
long in Mnonk. Illinois. but may state that
was-er-gong from Chicago 70 St Louis with.
out money. on a wager-wth myself when fell
into Minonk. Fell Is about right in this con
nection The brakeman demanded coin, and
had no coin. So fell of the flatcar, and the
place where fell happened to bc Mnonk II
was then about o'clock in the morning. and tn.
fast freight went right through Minonk. / ddnt
even get scraped landed in some bushes on the
outskirts OF town. and il was soft spot. ! got VI
and hoofed ii to the station An accommodation
train had just got in and there twelve sad
people on the platform They looked their part
They were hams. / can tell ham two mile.
away In a valley without pince-ne They
were dickering with tho driver of a craft tha
looked like a Hank Monk stagecoach about tn,
ride up to the hotel. likewise for the transports
tation of their gear to the op'ry house. There
were three trunks in the bunch. which included
costumes. street apparel and the whole works
for the presentation OF 'Shakespearean roper,
tore. The bus driver wanted 10 cents for the
whole job, and the main guy of the push was try
Ing 10 get him TO do II c. o. ID. The driver re
nigged, and when the main guy got him down Il
90 cents he produced the half and the bunch start
ed for the inn. was standing rubbering at em
with my hands In my pockets, and filled with thu
earnest desire for coffee and hot biscuits tina
you've read about when the main guy, who hac
on an olive green frock coat mot the origina
colon and plug hat OF an extreme vintage, pipe,
me OIL neglected to state that all in all, had
pretty good front for fat car tourist Befor
starting out from Chicago I'd got hold of 81. AM
Invent down the bay with it Got PAPER mac
suit shoes. hat, and pink flannel shirt for 81 so
the goods still held together and looked goo
enough.
'lia, mo Cassie says the boss ham OF tn
bunch stepping away from the bus and looking
me over. ''me.hinks you resemble tho castawa
upon the shores Of Time that we lost back in Fair
bury yesterday.
That So? said l. lie must ha' been a la-la
I'd like to meet up with a double that had tn
price. l could use him.
The poor guy looked hungry himself hut h
had learned the lesson OF chcrrfulrnss unde
adversely. He beamed upon me ja-' ~ il h
was on the point OF handing me mo: s.. and h
said:
"'Canst act?'
TWAS UP TO me tolaugh. and I did.
81 could put UP the biggest bluff you saw
Abanquet scene, right now. without any rehearsal
told him. but in other parts I don't think Il
ever be able TO chase Booth and Barrett over tn
Mexican line
Say. said the poor devil, dropping his voic
conhdonually and Delaying his shakespeare
patter. you'll do We're a man shy. He ddn
I'M -.