The times., 1899-09-10
CAPTAIN SIS WISE GOOSE.
An Exception in the Species UsuaII.
Called Silly Bird.
(From the New York SUI. }


Folks call a man goose when he's
iort O. foolish, but l tell you gen elmen
that's great mistake. The goose is one
o the wisest animals as flies, an / knows
what I'm talking bout"
Capt. 81 Bunnell was getting under way,
one of the most expert gunners round all
the shore of Barnegat Bay, and his hear
ers were two New York sportsmen who
had run down for two or three days with
the geese and ducks during the season just
closed.
''I'll tell you what's the gospel truth.
once had an old gander named Ben, an
be knowed almost as much as a man.
got him this way: One day i was out gun
ming an a flock of geese came to the
stools. l let 'em have both barrels
downed three. Two on EN- was pretty
badly hurried an / got 'em easy, but 10th
er one give me long chase, an 'cept that
goose can't dive I'd never have got him
at all. Hows'ever l got him, an when l
come to 'samine him he wasn't hurted a
bit 'cept that the tip end of the bone on
one wing was shot off. That kept him
from flying then an frever afterward.
Wei, sirs, as he was fine gander | made
up my mind to keep him for a honker
He soon got right tame, an would eat
out o my hand an follow me all bout
the farm. l learned that fellow to do
most everything told him to do. I'd say,
'Honk. Ben, an he'd honk till you'd think
he'd split his throat The geese I've killed
with that bird would s'prise you. I'd take
him out to a seaweed bed an he'd set there
quiet as could be till I'd see a flock O.
geese coming, an I'd say 'Honk. Ben
an he'd hOnk like he was calling EN- to
supper. An bless your hearts. they al
ways come.
We'll, on course he got talked bout an
lots o gunners tried 10 buy him from me
but wouldn't ha teked a hundred dollars
for him. At last, one day when | was
way from home he went OFF. / knowed he
hadn't gone fur o. his own accord, but
when he didn't come back Flowed he'd
strayed down 10 the medders an been kill
ed or stolen.
'Arter q couple O. months or so, hearn
tell O fellow on tother side OF the bay,
a onery thieving sort o cuss as had
goose, an / lowed at once that was my
Ben. So cross the bay ] goes, an sure
enough. as soon as / seed the goose rec
ognized him an he recognized me. But |
didn't let on as | come for the goose, for
/ was feared the onery cuss would get
way with it. Spriggs, says I, that's
mighty fine gander you got there; kin he
honk?' I guess So says he; but l amt
had chance TO try him yet; l bought him
from maan down the bay arter the season
was over
Il come back, an up to Toms River l
goes an gets a writ o plev'n for that
goose, an when we gets into court that
there SpTiggs he went an swore he'd had
that goose two year. .Jedge says 1, with
your leave, I'd like to ask that there fen
dant one or two questions. Fire away
says the jedge. Now, look here Mr.
Spriggs,' says /, you say you had that
there goose two year: I'd like you to tell
me if he knows what you say to him.
How can a goose know what you says to
him?' says he. Is that so? says l. Jedge
you'll allow If I tell that goose TO do GER
tain things, an he does 'em, that he's my
goose sure enough That 'ud be pretty
good evidence. says the jedge,
'All that time they had old Ben tied by
the legs an perched up on a table. ledge,
says I, Just make 'em turn the goose loose
an I'll soon show you The jedge made
'em take of the strings, an Spriggs he
says nuthin cause he didn't know the bird
Ben says !, come here The way that
old gander futtered off the table an come
trotting up to me made the jedge look
sharp at Spriggs an Spriggs turn pale.
Ben says /, set down. and down he sot
Ben says /. git up, an he got Ben
says |, honk. an honk good Ben honked
till you'd thought the roof was going off
'Capen ST.. says the iedge, there can't be
no manner o doubt that goose is yourn'
An so, gentlemens, says the man as says
the goose is the foolishest animal as flies
don't know what he talkin' bout"