The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1899-05-26
FACTS AND FANCIES.

Explicit.-Willie ION being asked to
bring from the library table a book that
HAPPENED to be bound in paper)-''Do you
want the seft-ehelled one, mamma o.
Judge.
women are CATS" snapped farley, Vi
ciously.
Nonsense" said Dawson, Ibid you
Harlem Life.
Excusable-Young mother-'Horrors
Here's an account in the paper of a
woman who sold her baby for 10 cents"
Young Father (weari1y) it
was teething. New York Weekly.
One sort: "Ypu sold this dog to ME for
a bifu dog: He doesn't know bird
when he sees Gne. / took him out yes
terday and he wouldn't t0Hk at d bird. -
.Well, how was the bird cG8ked?"
Brooklyn Life.
Mr.. Hornbill- you know, darling,
| could pick you out Of a crowd of woln-
en- {ust H y yGSr styled DON'T vonaor and
me with this same old dress for the last
two years!"- -Brooklyn Life.
Clothii1g-Actor-.. Y our play Is rather
wordy' Playwright-"t have sought
only to clothe my thought In fitting IAN
guage'' ''To be sure, but d little cloth
ing goes Il good way iii the Modern
drama, you kiiow. "-Detroit Journal.
Mr.: Casey-:"Phwat's thot chune yer
Maggiy-"s1 wish My Rent Was
Paid"
Mr.. Casey-"Drop thot, We divil! YEN
Puck,
Mamma johnny; what did you mean
by saying NO when l asked YOU If you
went bathing, when you knew you were
telling a wrong story?"
day to 6e d lhaf aid learn to say No?
Boston Transcript.
A little 5-year-old youngster who had
been to see ''Uncle Toms Cabin" said
to- Ills mother the next day: Mamma,
what's g6lhg to be at the Bijeu tonight %
ri 5a4H Tgp 'f4 GaRi my sl n,gy replied
" u foHi diea FFestssfaaay7lS u ''e wy
Blitzen-"I was Sorry t0 see tei Ut,
your wheel last Sunday. Evidently you
haven't much respect for the Sabbath"
Donder- You'd better talk; you were
playing golf all day long"
Blitzen-"Yes, but golf, you know, is a
holey game. Boston Transcript.
Dad" said the youthful Billvillian,
'thar's a big rattlesnake under the bed!''
"All right" snid the old man. composed
ly, ''jtst let llip stay thar--~kaze # you
poster him He'll sBritg his rattle an
wake yer nanny up, an then thar'll be
the devil to pay!'-Atlanta Constitution.
Hibbler-"What are you writing now?''
Scribbler--"A volume of bright sayings
for infants"
Hibbler-"But how on earth can it be
of any use to infants?'
Scribbler-"It can't. It's intended to
be of use to parents i'll saving the wear
and tear on their imagina ton. Brook
Ign Life.
49," exclaimed the Ohio judge scorn-
fully, you are the kind of main who
would try to get a divorce from your
wife simply because she had an artificial
optic"
lit th wasn't simply hat Xoor d hGnGf IT,
a burden to me asking me if her eye was
in straight. '-Washington Star.
Servant from next door)-"Please
mum, missis sends her compliments, and
will We let your daughter. sing and play
the piano this afternoon?
Lady-"Why, certainly. Tell your
mistress I'm glad she likes it."
Servant-"Oh. it isn't that, mum; She
expecting visit from the landlord, and
she wants some excuse for asking for u
| reduction in the re1lt."-1it- Bits.
~ lOotpail nldtcH Ill tiaSso", an
old lady and her son were among the
Spectators, when the following cunversa-
ton took place between the two:
Old Lady-"I Gamma un erstan' that fit
ba' ava"
Her son explained about the opposing
teams trying to kick the ball through the
goals.
Old tady-"Well, the stupid gowks
that wadnu be i'll to dae if they wad
baud DOT O. ant anither's road.'-Tit.
BITS