The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1899-03-20
A THEATRICAL TALE.
Showing That the Modern Stage Has
Vocabulary of Its Own.
washington POST


MY Friend From India" in company
with the Merchant of Venice" stroll
ed BY the Sad Sea Waves" One Sum-
mer's Day." and each told of his
Bachelor Romance. Now both of
these men were stopping at the Hotel
Topsy Turvy,' where they heard about
What Happened to Jones. The
Widow Jones' told of the time when
she, The Bride Elect" stood before
The Little Minister, listening to The
Serenade" she was receiving. 1t was
just before she performed "A Marriage
of Convenience" for she was Worth
a Million" and owned the Old Home
stead" Way Down East in the "Shen-
andoah'' valley. She told of the trouble
she had with THE Head of the Fam
ily'' when he was AN American Citi-
zen" and as such always treated his
Little Host with Brace OF Part
ridges and some "Tannhauser" every
time they happened to call So one day
Lord Chumley'' and the Hon. John
Grigsby'' trotted into the Hamlet"
thinking of "A Round of Pleasure" they
would have with The Village Post
master" for through the influence of
The Senator and his Uncle Dick he
got that position. They found him ly'
ing sick like "A Dog In the Manger,"
being attended by REV. Griffith Dav-
EXPORT" DR.. Belgraff" and "A French
Maid" who was one of the Cay Pari-
siennes." but still "A Lady of Quality"
He was able to tell of the time when he
was "a War Correspondent" and how
"A Little Corporal of the Jolly Mus
keteers" planted the Red White and
Blue" Beside the Bonnie Brier Bush
While the band played Yankee Doodle
Dandy and THE ConquerOrs' marched
or.
Each man had a tale to tell. One told
of THE Girl From Paris "a Runaway
Girl who was chased by the Secret
Service" men to 1.-THE Heart of Mary
land and there arrested for being con-
cerned in THE Great Diamond Rob
berry" She made The Sign of the
Cross" to show that she was not "A
DeviFs Disciple" but AN Artists Mod
Stolen" and AN Enemy to the King"
but now a favorite of Bonnie Prince
Charlie Miss Francis of Yale "A
Female Drummer" hearing of the
Much Ado About Nothing went in
search of this Dangerous Maid" and
found her ION the Sidewalks of New
York." where she had been for "a Day
and Night looking for "Chimmie
Fadden," the Beau Brummel'' of
.Hogan's Alley "Aristocracy." They
happened to recognize each other as
1.-The Two Orphans" but looked more
like THE Two Migrants" in The Span
of Lie"
The last told of "a Carpet Dagger"
who, after having a little of "a Vir-
ginia CeurtshiD" with "a Colonial
Girl was given THE Marble Heart"
and took "A Trip to Chinatown" "A
Black Sheep" got mixed up in the
crowd with "A Black Hussar," and the
latter gave the animal Wang" which
in;c Of II 10
met THE Sporting Duchess" "At the
French Ball. but THE Sporting Life
and 1.-THE Ballet Girl" was TOO Much
johnson" for him, and he had to give
in. So ION. and OFF, during The
Twelfth Night of his sickness he fell
asleep, Never Again" to have chance
to talk with The Telephone Girl but
thought only of his wife, Because She
Loved Him So
tales of these 'Three Dragons" Won
der in amazemenJ at the things Herr
man does. and can tell us why THE
Minstrels" are slower than The Tur-
tie" But you all will be surprised
when /. "a Fortune Teller" tell you
why Smith Left Home" You see, he
married The Belle of New York"
named Catherine who was a friend
of THE Charlatan' and a believer in
Tue Iuoi > rye. w ell, one Gay She
fell in love with THAT Man, Nathan
Hale, "a Stranger In New York" and
dead "On Going to the Races" and
asked him to name '"The Wedding Day"
She was arrested one day after seeing
that beautiful painting fTrilby'' and
"Courted Into Court" on the charges
of being "A Guilty Mother of "a Rag
Baby'' and for trying to Rob Roy" of
"a Bunch of Keys in order to get THE
Great Ruby" which Julius Caesar"
said was in "1492'f slowed away I'm
der the Red Robe,'' and left there by
"A Fool Of Fortune
No one is to think of "Jim the PEN
man" and the writer are Rivals" but
we feed sure that ."Zaza" would call the
men who wrote these stories Liars"