davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
WOMEN EXECUTI0NERS.
BeIgIum Had One Recently and Nlr-
EInia Had One Before the
Revelation.

What do you think Of a woman Who
offered herself to the gov
ernmcut as the public executioner?
s few years ago the official public ex'
ecutioner at Brussels died and sub
stitute was temporarily appointed. On
one occasion this person was i'll and
unable to attend. But at the appointed
hour stout middle-aged woman pre-
sented herself at the central police sta
tion and quietly remarked to the as
semblcd furctionaries:
1--WE come for the execution. My
husband is not very well this morning
and has asked Inc to take his place
Please let Us get 10 business.
The general stupefaction may be
more easily imagined than described,
which, being noticed by the would-be
lady executioner, she added, in re-
assuring tone: "Oh, this is not by any
means the first time
ltafterward transpired that the wom-
an. who name was Marie Bege, had Of
fciated Oh several occasions in lieu OF
Iher husband. Dressed in his clothes
auI her face masked, she had been the
public cNccutioner at several eNeeu
tions. and never had the proceedings
been interrupted by single hitch. 1t
is needless to add that the police au-
thorities were unable TO avail them
selves of her offer on this occasion,
however.
1t will be a surprise to most people
to learn that there has actually been
a woman cXecutioner in this country
In olden times few cared to undertake
1.-THE office of executioner. and occasion
Ially death sentences were rCspited or
demolition that the criminal should per
form this Office \ case Of this sort oc
Ieurrcd in pre-reyolutionary days, wher
A woman was sentenced to death for !
murder She had committed in Virginia
The death sentence was respite ] on
Iaer offering to become public execution
er, and, known as Lady Betty" she
performed these duties for many years
e She officiated on the scaffold withou
any mask or disguise and flogged erin
!. I,nals through the streets with enthusi
i lastic vigor.-N. Y. Herald,
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
IlIA pLACED NV.

| was talking with the sheriff of
Albemarle county when a man came
nm and shook hands with him and
asked after his health, and he was
on when the official said:
Say, your face is familiar, but your
name has slipped my mind
"rruefoot, sir-IIyman Truefoot," re-
piled the stranger.
"Truefoot? Iou-you live around
tere?'
about IA miles away
"And where have ! met you
"Why. can't you place me-? asked
the man with a laugh.
81 somehow can't. know your race
and the name is also familiar but
can't get you down fine.
"Well, I spent two months in yonl
iail and just got out last week | stol'
hog. | was in cell No. A, Don't yo'
place me now?'
"Oh, of course-of course laughed
the sheriff. Eyes, ! place you now, ant
how do you Go, Mr.. Truefoot-how d
YOU do? Really, but I'm ashamed 0
myself for being so absent-minded''
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
80 - II -
a An ulth a YeunE Lady Who
Wrote Circular AoTe
Letters.

yss p.sDls can rons eIeze to each other
~ E9,t ssrsBin1 ia big city. 1 stumbled
--t, : easa ~ ether day. A lev menths
sr5 / was let down the trapdoor q SOM
h5Iy's confidence. Men don eonhoe Nefe
often. but whsn they do they maze lahl-
> M T6is one did. He told me Of poor Attle
C7Inrbus eirl who was h0peless-y II lS4g
WIN nm. Unrequited love Is such a o-1
for sympathy, YOU know, and m TINS So So
# seemed . dreadiulIy pathetic. foor Iittte
tbipql II She could only care. loE some ms M
eisaf Rut then she couldn't, be kneW' h5
,-as worried in a lofty, e0Rdescendlng Alnl
of way. He hated TO think that ne mus
wreck a life on the shore Of loye-ont theh
be could not care for her-toT, Wella sue
cared too much for him, you know
Before the end Of the month / was w
"a the ears in confidence SIX uniorIuhla.e
fellows. neither Of whom knew the olheI' ..
were beloved by six unfortunate girls-Ml IN N
al Of the love emanating IRON me ieli@'s
side -. ,f u
sax wban one day / called in on lively
! little friend Of mine in big Hlgh s1se'
4 ofSea bpildinq. and found her writing iet-
/ tars "Six N them-al alike, except Tor the
I addresses" said she.
"Circular letters!' ] asked.
"Yes. circular love letters" she laughed
t showing the addresses.
Marjorie. YOU don't mean that you arS
the composite young woman IN love VIII
/ these SIX men% A..
SOb. YES, / am, and it's great fun, too
And you ought to see the way they all oe
Teye III TAX about Aattering woman
Why. they can't be touched compared TO
man. Why, i has never occurred to one o
them that possibly ! might not mean me y !.
Oh, YES, I'm an object OF pity, an Ilen'
Let's see-Im to commit SUICIDE t"lTe' q
;nfo M two nunneries, and-well, die OF 81
hroIep ln[2 N hearts some way. Oh, I'm in al
awful shape o.4or.o;r
nert Int then. YOU know, Tn understudS
inc a mart at the theater that gust need
such practice. Ohio State Journal.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
M. QUAD'S HUMOR


THE NfAN N 10 wet I-DAsf.
He vas a seriuos-lookins though /
rather seeiy man. and thcrc was an ar
Of mystery about him as kc approached /
the man in the doorof q shoe store and
said.
Wreck. ruin and deso'arion for poor
humanity.
What's the mattcrw With bumanityT
asked the other.
up here on the corner" whispered
the ssrious-looking man. as be pointed
a long finger, there is place where
souls enter. to be forever lost 1t IS q
wreeker Of happy hearthstones-a de-
stroyer Of family happiness.
Il never heard Of such a place.
But it is there. Its external appear
ance is calculated to lure the uHwary.
They ,uter-they imbibc- they are
wrecked. At this moment men who are
drinking in there are fitting themselves
for suicides graves-for prison-tor
everlasting infamy. They will 60 home
TO beat their wives and 10 slay their
children
Maybe you are speaking Of a sa-
loon?" queried the man in the door
way.
- am, sir-a gilded palace where you
can see yourself in mirrors while Won
drink. 1t is also a free-lunch place,
! There is also a ticker in there. All!
ruin. wreck and desolation.
swell, you keep away from i and
YOU will escape. There is no law tc
compel YOU 10 enter there"
But l want to enter, sir, protested
the scrious-lookiug man. "lcs, sir,
want to strike you for nickel and en-
ter there"
"Oh, you do? There is wreck. ruiz
and desolatjon there"
Il know it, sir, but | want to b
wrecked, ruined, desolated. Can't yo'
spare me nickel?'
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
STRUCK A BARGAIN.
A Deal In Cow Buying That Crea'eu
BAD DIood between Neigh
bOrs.

Blanks ugler than bear, complained
one board Of trade man to another, recent,
liz. "Whats the matter with him, anyhow;
Haven't YOU heard: III tell you on the
1uiet. but never intimate to hlm that YOU
know thing. 1t would be all your lie
worth. You know he owns tne home out
north OF the boulevard .,
"Off to the right near Highland PARK!
That's the place. lie has nelghbor on
either side and one OF them owned one OF
these cows that never wants to stay where
she's put. She was constantly breaking into
Blanks back yard, tramplng the lawn to
oieces, breaking the shrubbery and using
the side of the house, in lieu OF straw,
stack, to rub against. No tencethat would
not deface the property would keep her out,
and Blank decided that something must be
done He could not bear the idea OF a
neighborhood row, so he went to the owner
of the cow, told him that She had become an
intolerable nuisance and that he would glad
w give $50 to have her disposed Of: The of
Ter was promptly accepted, and the money
paid. A morning or two later the COW was
IN the yard again, destroying things just as
Of old. Blank hunted up his neighbor and
said: i thought you promised me to get rid
Of that COW at once.
- did and ] have. Sold her to your
neighbor on the other side for $50. Pretty
| good deal, wasn't it; $50 for a S25 COW!
Blanks been mad enough to shoot eve
| since Detroit Free Press
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
/" Only the First Step
Difficult. y

The fist step n Sgn1g
Should s. to cleanse Nafare's 5
loose from Wnter's aocunis-
lztions. Hoods Sarsspaniila
does this Soork easily. Il Is
Americas Greatest Spring
Heiicine. EpgrifSes tie blood
IS niilIonS of people say.
+ i makes the weak strong, as nervous
rasn and women gladly testify. It
cures al blood diseases, as thousands
ef cured voluntarily write. It is just the
msdieins for you, as you viii gladly say
after yOu have given it fair trial.
BAD Bscod = Although past 70 years Of
are am thoroughly well. Il was three
bottles Of Hoods sarssparilla that made
me 40 after spending ever 80 in medical
attendance. Ny trouble vas raw sore On
nv ankle.n Mas LoUIaA Mason, Court
Street. Lowell. Mass.
Running Sores AFTER Worrying four
months gave my children Hood oAfsa'
parilla and il cured them q running sores.
Hoods Pills cured me q cysgepsia and
constipation Mas. KATE Z. THOMAS, q
Governor ST., Annapolis, Nd.
Constructive Cough : a Five years
ago / had a eonsumptive cough when re-
d1ced ne to a skeleton. Was advised to
take Hoods sarsaparilia which ! did and
recovered normal health. have been vel
ever slnee.n MATILDA BREDSEWATEE, Cor
Pearl and Chestnut Sts., JefieTsonville, Ind
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
POKER PARLANCE.
A sunday School BOY whose Educ"'
tiOn Included . knowledge
Of Good Pairs.

The mixed metaphor Of South SIDE Sun,
day school teacher and the precoclousness oil
a youngster Of seven in the juvenile class,
who had evidently been listening to some
fatherly club stories not intended Tor ms
ears, combined to disrupt the. Bible seIV-
ices temporarily couple Of weeks, ago, he,
Gently the good pastor Of the church received
a call to snother congregation and IN re-
ferring to this the young woman who sees
to the spiritual growth Of the youngest
charges Of the church dwelt at some length
on the righteousness, faith and upright lie
of the pastor who had been so highly hon
ored. She impressed her young hearers with
the "faithfulness to duty, that had char
aeterized the career OF the beloved minister
and was listened to with devout and deep
attention. Believing this lesson had Ell
fectively penetrated the young minds tht
teacher asked:
"And now who can tell me the one thint
that our pastor held so dear that he shoulC
receive this CALI"
After an interval Of silence, during whicl
the members Of the small set looked abou
somewhat uneasily, a shrill voice came from
the end Of pew, where its owner and hi
knickerbocker suit were curled up com
fortably against the cushions
II know"
''Well, Bobby|
"Aces,"-Chicago Inter Ocean.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward
for any case Of Catarrh that cannot be cured
by Halls CatarIh Cure.
F. j. Cheney & Co., Props, Toledo, Q.
We, the undersigned, have known F; y.
Cheney for the last Is years, and believe HIM
perfectly honorable in all business transac,
tions and financially able to carry out any
obligations made by their firm. ~
West & Truax, Wholesale Druggists, To-
ledo, o. until.
Walding, Kinnan 4 Marvin, wholesale
Druggists, Toledo, o. I'll.
Hsil's Catarrh Cure il taken internally,
acting directly upon the blood and mucous
Snrfa9es of lie system Price 75c. per bot
tie. tie Sold by ali Druggists Testimonials
Halls Family Pills are the best.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
The Modern hattie.

Said the famous general to his chief CT
staff. "Are the correspondents ready?
They are, sir" ,.,t,.
Have they been informed that ! have
new uniform on"
eyes, general" -
Have the photographers done their
duty%
"They have, sir."
"Then let the battle 60 on."-Boston
Transcript.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
DRIVEN OUT.

"Well. George, how do you and the
Baptist church get along these days|
asked the colonel OF a colOred man who
bowed TO him on the street corner
81 hain't got muffin mo to do wild dat
Baptist church. sab" was the reply.
Since when?'
"Since two weeks ago. sah.'
"What happened then?'
"Why dey dun driy me into de Meth
odist rcligun by prcsentin' a pew-rent
hill fur fo' hundred dolars!'
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
The novaI wedding Cake.

ROYAL wedding cakes are never sent
out until they have matured at least
six months. The actual baking proc
ess lasts from five to seven hours. So
great is the demand for cake on the
occasion of a royal wedding that the
makers have always a stock of more
than 1000 pounds in the seasoning
room.-CincinnaA Enquirer.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
- - st.tIon q - -.

The new United States naval station g g
I,~s+s5 st Ssn Juan, Porto Rlcos VIII oe oI
~ Utmost imp0rtzace 70 tins cou54L! e -
~ ~ the situation when the Nle2EAsl14
ra1sI Is constructed. The key 70 good ns-isn Y
3 Wesfpttaris Stomach Bltters, Itguards me
digestive organs from attacks q IldlseslloLi
bfiiousnsss and constipation, Just the sane -
~ new naval station al San Juan VIII ara
~ attaeks upon this country BY foreign Toes
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

Old Bagrox-Do you think you can
surround my daughter with any de-
gree of luxury. sir?
Young Cheek-Yes. sir! Every time
I embrace her she says it is heavenly;
and that. ] believe, sir, is even better
than mercy luxurious Puck,
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
Not What she Expected.

Fangle-I saw your friend, Mrs, Jay
smith, get on the train and leave town with
married man this morning.
Mrs. Fangle deeply interested)-Well'
I've been expecting a scandal in that quar-
ter for some time. Who was it with the
shameless thing?
"Her husband. Harlem Life.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
Crescent Hotel. Eureka SPRING. Ar
knnaas,

Opens February % In the Ozark Noun
tains. Delightful climate Beautiful scenery
Uneaualed medicinal waters. Cheap e1-
eursion rates. Through sleepers VIA frisco
Line Address ]. o. Plank, Manager, Room
Ii, Arcade, Century Building, or FRISCO
Ticket Office, No. lol \. Broadway, ST.
IouiS Mo,
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

s.Rastusl" yelled Aunt Diana in ioua
voiee. svo' en- Miami Snowflake cum IN 2. heah
~ berry instance en- stop PlaylR' VII Gen. deIn
sir white folks ehillun, All dey wants 1
4 learn a lot ob cakewalk hgahs en- Gen z,
dey won't hab nuthin' mo t do vii 20 =
0hin State Journal
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
Hard on the Collector.

The Merchant-Did he kick at the bill?
The Collcctor-Yes, but | don't see what
made him think had it in my hip pocket
N. Y. World
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

First Cook (reading gl-Wanted, to 60 ta
Connecticut, a 6rst-elass cook. Good wages
Second Cook-Niver, on yer lolte. sure
isn't that where they make alarum clocks!
Jewellers Weekly.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

OH times are hard indeed, of which I'm
the sad recorder:
No business dcing everywhere | roam.
Ive been ont now three weeks and Got but
a single order
And that was from the firm to come
straight home.
--Iudge
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

Write ta-lau to Allen S. Olmsted, lie Roy,
~. for FREE sample Of Allen toot-
Ease. a powder to shake into your shoes. IL
cures chilblains, sweating, damp, sWollen'
aching fee;. II makes tight shoes -, eaSs
C,,raS C0rns. .Bunions and Ingrowing Nails.
AUdrurgists and shoe stores selllt . cents
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

Husbaud-"0hl there's that confounded
rheumatism again." Wife-"Im so sorry;
! wanted to goshopplng tomorrow, and
your rheumatism is always sign OF rain.
Isn't it provoking! !'-London Tit-Blts.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

"Jumkins never laughs unless there's
money in it." I've seen him laugh at the
theater." "0f course he has to laugh there
to get his money back. Chicago Daily Rec
ord.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

Jimny-"Is your aunt on your mothers
oryour fathe sside" Tommy" Sometimes
on one side and sometimes on the other. 1t
depends on who is getting the best OF it. =
Boston Globe.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

"How are you getting along with that
raw Swede girl you hired 2 She is not raw
now. My wife's mother mas been roasting
her three times day ever since she came.
Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

"I would like to tell you funny story
about my little boy" oh, well, go ahead.
"But | have forgotten it, Say, don't you
want a good cigarE-Indianapolis Journal.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

"I'll make a fortune out of my new musi,c,
box. You put penny in the slot and"
"And the thing plays popular air, NO
1t stops playing one. San Francisco Ex-
aminer.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

A Sure Sign.-Dasherly-"W Wonder if thal
was married couple that Just passed
Downtrod-"Without doubt. heard her
call him awkward eaif when he stepped on
her skirt. IN. Y. journal.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

He-Do you like classical music?
She--Do you want my honest opinion OF
ire you thinking of inviting me to the opera
Chicago Evening News.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

McGonigle-The candidates voice has
PLAYED out
Heeler-WeN, be can still sign checks,
can't he?-Philadelphia North American,
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

He ian old hand)-They had dropped their
anchor.
She ia beginner)-Served them right. 1t
has been hanging over the side all day long
Tit Bits.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

'0vhg do you call Jimpson a confidence
man. Because he's always taking people
aside and telling them his private affairs
under pledge OF secrecy. san Francisco
Examiner.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

80 your poodle ran away, Miss Che!
"Ycs. I'm very sorry now ! didn't have a
muff made out of him-as Jack wanted me
TO PUCK.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

The best is the cheapest, but the cheap
est isn't always the best-Chieago Da'y
News.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

II was afflicted with Eczema more than
twenty years One box OF lettering cured
me."-RevA A. G. Turner, Lakeland, ria. QUO.
ct druggists, or by mail for cash or stamps
!, T, SRuptrine, manir., Savannah, Ga.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

Costs but lc per b. TO grow. SalZer haS. the
seed. German Coffee Berry, pkg. l5e; Java
Coffee pkg. l5c Salzer's New American
Chicory l5c. Cut this out and send l5c for
any Of above packages or send 3Oe and get
All 3 pkgs. and great Catalogue free to JOHN
A, SALZER SEED co. La Crosse, Wis.lk. !
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

whats dis yere copper combination deg
talks of in de papers? Some new move OF
de p'lice commission, ! s'pose. e."-Bostor
Commercial Bulletin.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

The Grip OF Pneumonia may be warded OF
with Hale's Honey of Horehound and Tar.
Pixies Toothache Drops Cure in one minute.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

It's difficult for men to check their ex-
penses unless they have bank balance
Chicago Daily News.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

Whenever some people are able to raise
the wind they can't resist blowing them
selves.-Puck.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

No man can resist rattling a little money
he has in his pocket.-Washlngton (la.)
Democrat.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

Sububs-"Fve just returned from hunt
ing trip" Towne-"H House or cookE-
Puck.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

After physicians had given me up, was
s,ved bv Piso's Cure.-Ralph Erieg, VIII
Transport, Pa, Nov 2, 1898,
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

and Fever is bottle of GROVES TAsTELEss
CHILL Toxic 1t is simply iron and qulnine IN
q tasteless form Nocure-no pay. Price,0Oc.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

Don't use cannon to kill chipping BIRDS
Olean IN. W Times.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

You can't tell about boys salary by the
engagement ring he buys for his glrl.-N ASH
ington (Ia.) Democrat.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

at is dreadful TO think what horrid
things people are saying about mel"
My dear lady, surely you don't mind
such ill-natured gossip as all that?'
"Certainly do-wheu it's every bit of
II e!"-Punch.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
To Cure a Cold in One Day

Take Laxative Bromo Quinine Tablets, All
druggists refund moneHifit fails to cure. 2oc.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

<HE constantly recurring monthly suffering gives women
the blues! ..
How hopeless the future appears, month after montn
the same siege with menstrual pain
Comparatively few women understand that excessive pain
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

indicates ill-health, or some
serious arrangement of the
feminine organs.
A million women have been
helped by Mrs. Pinkham. Read
what two of them say.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
J6ctASel1qba'l8
IIl2lzsI slE!:I ::IIfIU

Hood1 r7lls rurs liver ~, the aoa-lrri,atlnE and
lie cnIy esihaTtic 70 take with noods sAIsapaIiA:
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07

The president Of gas company naturally
has light income.-Chicago Daily News.
The Southern herald., 1899-04-07
DESPOM OMDEMT
WOMEN

Mrs LIZZIE COLEMAN of Wayland N. " writes
DEAR Mrs PINKHAM-For years suffered with painful
mensruaton and falling of womb The oearngoow pans
/; NV hack and bps were dreadful l could not stand for
-. G.. .n;.n4or time when mensruaton began
The oasis., 1899-08-19
WILL some of the newspapers

WILL. some of the newspapers which are so glib about bogus mining stock schemes" tell what is a bogusscheme ofthe kindl Some of the mines which have prov ed the most valuable sunk shafts great distances and expended hun dreds of thousands of dollars be- fore getting pound of ore. On the Comstock lode shafts have been sunk one thousand or fifteen hun dred feet or more with good indica- tions all the way. yet no ore, while in shafts few hundreds feet away on either side bonanzas were deve- loped How is mine to be deter mined fake without going down? How can depth be attained with out expenditure of money? How can money be secured without selling stock9 Who would sell the stock if a mine were we'll developed and paying handsome dividends? It IS the faith which can see what is in the ground before a hole is dug, and the confidence which can be imparted to others who will invest their money upon that confidence, which has developed the mining re- sources of the world, in all climes and ill all countries.
The oasis., 1899-08-19

ECUADOR has adopted the gold standard, to take effect in 1901, but the business men of the country have already brought the commerce of the country to gold basis. The gold "condor" about the same in- trinsic value as the English sover- eign or the American five dollar coin is to be the standard of va- lue, and of the "sucre" the present standard, about equal to the Mex ican dollar in value ten are to ex- change for one condor" Coinage ofsilver and gold are to be at ra- tio of 3o.I toI.
The oasis., 1899-08-19

THE Fl Paso Times says: HE OASIS says: At Casas Grandes, Chihuahua, 100 miles from the scene ofthe Yaqui trouble, across al. most impossible mountains, a cor respondent of the Chicago Tribune,
 is wiring daily whole colums of fake news from the seat of war, which is in turn telegraphed to other pa- pers all ovsr the country. The sto- ries all eminate from the fertile ima- gination of the correspondent and do much harm" THE OASIS would be safe i'll gambling that the cores pondent has never seen Casas Gran des, and is operating from Austin.
The oasis., 1899-08-19

WHENEVER the adherents oi any cause resort to assassination, vio- lence or intimidation of those oppos- ed, that cause is inherently weak and deserves defeat. The recent attempt 10 assassinate NJ. Labori, the chief counsel for Dreyfus is the strongest kind of evidence against his accusers. Any cause which re- sorts to such ends is rotten.
The oasis., 1899-08-19

THE people of Calabasas and vicinity who had so successfully fought off the Calabasas land grant now find they have another grant to fight, the "Baca float No. B." having been held to include their lands. What a curse these land grants have been to honest settlers in the west.
The oasis., 1899-08-19

DIAPERS history of the civil war lays down the proposition that there is ill the growth and develop ment of nation an inherent force which cannot be hampered or divert ed by written constitutions or pre- cedents. That was the force which held the Union from disintegration in the early sixties, which led to the Mexican war and acquisition of California and New Mexico in the forties, and effected the Louisiana purchase at the beginning of the century. The same force controls the American people now, and it will make not only the Philippines but all the Antilles iualienable American soil.