The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1899-01-19

A wise doctor enlightens young men
the St. Paul Dispatch on how
to select wife 10y examining her eye
brows. Still young males will probably
continue in their ill-advised efforts to
examine other parts as well.
Xxx
eve have annexed slavery" cries al
exchange. "The contract laborers III
Hawaii are really slaves" And what
the deuce are the contract laborers of
the United States? If they don't like
their jobs they can quit, hey? Yes
and be Immediately arrested for vag-
rancy and set to work OH the public
street with ball and chain attachments.
There is not an obsolete, tyrannical old
monarchy in all Europe where things
of that kind can be done, but then, OF
course this is free country.
*
That beef could not have been worse,
embalmed than Gen. Egan's mouth.
1t has bad taste. There certainly
must be something deceased up the
creek, as Hamlet used to say.
One Fri Day of Ohio says that
Mckinley is superior to both Lincoln
and Washington. He should change
his name to Bray. 1t would be more
in keeping with his nature.
1t was not so generally known that
BLACKBOARD could hold high rank in
the U. S. Army, but it has now beer
proven.
Xxx
One OF my exchanges mentions t he
fact that he always saves THE MIRRoe.
to give to tramps who beg for paper
Now that stamps that editor as kind
hearted man. There are plenty of ed
itOrS who in that case would have Civ
en- the tramp their own paper. But
those men are on a par with the Chart
able young lady who gives the tramp
the cake made by herself, while she en-
joys the one made by the hired girl.
Morristown Press, please copy.
Xxx
"A veteran of the Civil War starved
to death in st. Paul last week. This is
merely feeble attempt on the part Of
the capital city to prove itself metro
pOlitan.
A Tennessee man asked his wife for
) cents for street car fare and was re-
fused, upon which he went out ana
borrowed a black mask and came back.
and held her up for $4,000 which she
had saved out of his wages. He has
not yet been arrested, but as he takes
the car twice a day, he is suspected.
~
The Chicago Board of Education has
made rule that no married womau
can teach III the public schools there
1t is darkly limited that some mem.
bers of the board will get a rake Off
from the divorce lawyers on the result.
ant fees.
Xxx
A Missouri man has been sent IL
jail for six months for kissing young
woman. He was no naval hero.
Xxx
Bill Smith has been chosen speaker
of the Colorado Legislature. The
name seems familiar.
Harry Wakefield of the Hutchinson
Times offers to loan me virgin cut
of Lydia Pinkham if l should wish to
illustrate the lady who was not kissed
by Hobson. Declined with thanks. In
the first place this won Id not be safa
place for a cut of Lydia. Harry will
no doubt understand this when he sees
what the cOnvicts do to the muse,
whenever she strayS in here. And
secondly, there is among our compost
tors gentleman who used to compete
with Uncle Sam i'll making pictures Of
the Goddess of Liberty. If we want
any illustrations we have the artists
here.
**#
Editors in the West have fancy fOs
pyrotechnical names for their papers.
Everybody remembers the Laramie
/ have pleasant re-
of the ''Solid MuldOon" OF
Ouray, Col, also of Ration IN. M
Comet. Then there is the Creede Can
die and Lamar Sparks. But the latest
addition is the "Bull Hill Single jack
What kind of a name is that to open a.