Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1899-03-09
CARLYLE AS A TUTOR
AN AMUSING ANECOOTE OF TIE
GREAT AND GLOOMY MAN.

a writer in The Scotsman has IN
earthed an amusing anecdote of Thomas
Carlyle as country dominic, " for
the accuracy of which he vouches. 1t
was told in 1853 by CUpar Fife law
yer and provost who had been one of
Carlyle's pupils at Kirkcaldy, to the
writer and Hugh Miller. The interest
| Of this gentlenian's "reminiscences of
| his schoolmaster was heightened by his
utter unconsciousDess that his old do
mimic was the Thomas Carlyle who was
then beginning to lie known TO fame.
| The old gentleman described the older
| race of Scottish sChoolmasters as always
| during scnOol hours wearing their hats
at least keeping their heads covered
| and many of the boys, viewing the Pc
| culiar angle at which the hat stood up
On the head and how near it came TO the
| eyebrows, could conjecture if the saw
age mood were to be that day predoni
nant.
"But my teacher" said the provost,
"a strict and gloomy disciplinarian
with the name of Carlyle, never wore
| his hat in the school, and indeed his
| brow was so overhung with dark threat
| ening that no extra expression TO alarm
us was needed from his lum hat! He
| did not thrash us either very often or
very severely, but we had fear that,
! if provoked, he would go great lengths
in punishment. | have seen his mere
scowl hush at once the whole school.
Hugh Miller here interposed by ask
ing, Ibid your teacher ever burst into
a strange laugh in SCHOOL,"
"That is a very odd question. re-
4 he Nk,xrf n och
But now that l remember, he had at
times verv extraordinary laugh that
made Us all stare. 1t had train of
queer chuckling which exploded in a
succession of loud and deep outlaws that
shook his whole body and displayed all
his teeth like the keys of a piano. He
then clapped his hands on the book he
held against his knees. Yet none of us
never knew at what he was laughing.
He had grim smile in reproving pupils
and n habit of tapping their heads with
his knuckles as he told them that the
heads would never be worth the price
of hats or the charge of barber, though
mammas and aunts had that morning
combed, kissed and blessed them, as if
they were teeming with the sublimest
inventions and designs!'
The provost saw that Hugh Miller
and some other guests were listening
eagerly, and he proceeded:
lone morning, few minutes before
the school hour, when most Of the pu-
pills had arrived, and, as rain was fall
ing, they had gone into the school, a
donkey, which had broken loose from
its tether on grassy spot near, was en-
tering the playground. Bill Hood and l
were so far on our way, and Bill, who
was stout and frolicsome lad-the
ringleader in many sports and tricks
rushed 10 mount the animal and began
TO guide and force it into the school.
with desperate squirting the donkey
was induced to carry its rider over the
Threshold, and what Il reception both
of them got from the Juvenile crowds,
Bags of books were at once fastened tn
the tail and around the neck of the ass,
and so busy wers Bill and half a dozen
companions in urging the animal to II
canter around the school and to ascend
the short stair of the masters desk that
they did rot notice how time was speed
ing, and before they could remove the
stranger Mr.. Carlyle appeared.
1--WE expected q tremendous explosion
of wrath, but he burst into a roar of
laughter-such a roar, however, as, in
stead of tempting us to join in it, pro
duced a sudden and complete hush, and
that roar was renewed again and again |
when the ass, withdrawing its furefeet |
from the first step Of the desk stair and |
turning round, took pace or two slow |
ly toward the master as if TO salute him. |
- That, exclaimed Carlyle, is the |
wisest and best scholar kirkcaldy has |
yet sent me. He Is fit to be your teach |
err He tapped the donkey's head as he |
was wont to do ours and said, There's |
something here far mere than in the |
skulls of any of his brethren before me, |
though these skulls are patted IN fond |
admiration by papas and mammas and |
though that far grander headpiece meets
only with merciless blows.
He then gave some hard taps on
Bill Hoods head, and would not allow
him to dismount, but for penalty or
dered him to ride up and down the |
school for an hour, while those boys |
who had been NEST active IN helping |
Bill to 20 through the farce had to
march in pairs before and behind the
perplexed looking ass. He did not re-
quire the other scholars to attend TO /
their several school lessons, but silently |
permitted them to stand as spectators |
of the grotesque procession Then he
himself, seated within his pulpitlike /
desk, surveyed Bill and his company.
II have not for years thought OF this
scene" continued the provost, but it
has now come back TO me freshly, and |
I remember that my old master had
very strange laugh. l don't know what
has become of him, nor indeed have 1
heard of him since I left kirkcaldy |
school"