The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1899-10-08

| from any man.
| The farmer on his wheel
To market brings his eggsi
| And many tidy pail
OF Wr1thing froggies' legs.
| The farmers daughter, too,
Not, doing things by halves.
| Wheels after him and Jugs
A healthy pair Of calves
Mr.. Hanna says that the way the DEM
| ocrats are urging Dewey to allow his
name to be used for the presidency Is
| simply indecent. 1t would be indecenter
If Dewey should accept and the indecent
| est thing that ever happened If he should
| be elected.
| What would an old-fashioned Christian
say to the churches of today? The SER
mons are about the latest scandals, and
| the minister tells the congregation to be
| sure not to miss the next chicken pie So
cial. The titles Of the sermons are some
| thing on this order:
THE Great Lesson Of the Dreyfus
| Scandal"
1.-THE Effect Of Electric Roads on
| Morals"
1.-THE Man in the Moon of the Bible"
| "Dewey's Influence"
what Robert Ingersou Did for HUI
manity'
Admiral schley and the Angels"
What Shall the Churches Do About
| Asphalt?"
Christian Athletics"
who's Who in Religion2'
"a Biblical Prophecy Of McKinleys
Policy"
"The Church and the Poles"
The Rev. Anna Kent will preach on
Masculine Ethics in the Pulpit
At the Old church, on Backnumber
street. the pastor will preach on God
and His Precepts." All seats free.
At a st. Paul church last Sunday the
minister said it was a perfect shame
the people didn't give more money to the
church. He said he did not believe there
was one man in the congregation who
had given a months, or even a weeks,
salary to religion. One young man want
ed to know where he could eat and sleep
while he gave his salary to the church,
but, finding that the pastor had made no
arrangement to feed the people who give
their salary, he says he will have to
wait until he saves up. Religion is almost
as expensive as matrimony and 1t costs
more to go to heavn than toto stay
here.
There is man in Chicago named
Dowie who is what is known as a good
thing. He is the head and front, neck
and crop, Of an institution called Zion
Temple, for which, within the last ten
says money Is tight? Dowie took this
sum and threw is up at the Temple cell
Ing, and all that stuck there he gave
to the Lord; with what was left Dowie
endowed the Dowies. His is a Christian
Science joint, with no medicine. Dowie
prays for the gullible sick, and If they
are not very Ill they get we'll and give
largely to the Temple in Thanksgiving
If they die, their faith failed but there
is nothing the matter with Dowie! Oh,
no; he's all right! He told his congre-
cation the other day that If they did
not give one-tenth of their possessions
| to the Lord, as represented by Dowie, he
| hoped that their houses would be de-
stroyed by fire and they in them. So it
may be said that Dowie has followers to
! burn. The Chicago ministers are busy
| denouncing Dowie, but as there is a
| sucker born every minute there IS no
fear of the aforesaid Dowie losing his
| Job.
Minneapolis is preparing a petition for
| the next Legislature, asking that Goose
bury's Best be made the state flower
There is big fight in prospect.
| Mr.. Merriam, the new census man, has
| issued some regulations about the work
to be done. He says men-of-war cannot
! be counted, nor buoys In the river, nor
the dead in Minneapolis, nor women
over thirty Of there are any, He also
| has declared that twins must be counted
but once, and men who lead double lives
! only once But he will write a special
little note to st. Paul to say that AL
bert Berg would count for two. Mime
| apolis is giving away a sack of flour
| and a picture of Tom Lowry couchaut
! to every new inhabitant who gets there
! before the census man begins.
In little Minneapolis paper published
! all over the world, but printed right here.
there appear some letters from admiring
readers. One letter reads: at Is GER
tainly delight TO throw ones self down
and read about friends all over the state
and the notables all over the coun
try" This is a bad case of throw
| down.
day laborer recently eloped with the
| daughter of the mayor of a Wisconsin
town. Sometimes a man will do any
desperate thing to set job.
Lost-One Pull: of value to no one but
owner. Return for reward to Capt Car
ter, Of Leavenworth.
| The Dispatch is authority on Pope's
bulls, but it may be accommodated If
| it doesn't look out.
| This year 800 women have taken out IL
censes to preach The others haven't
thought it necessary
| lady on the hill has cook who is
| city bred, and who was recently In
itiated into the mysteries of country
! life for the first time. She came rush
| ing in to her mistress the other day and
| said "Oh, ma am, the old black hen has
! got twenty-five little chicks. and I'm
| afraid she hasn't got milk enough for
| them alI.''
| Boys take notice-a New York scientist
| has Just discovered there is very little
| danger in kissing.
| The administration is getting terribly
| discouraged. Just as 1t was cooking ND
| nice scheme to send Dewey to the
| Philippines If he would not get so
| in the way, the acmiral says, he wants
| that house, and he wants 1t D. d. q. So
| the last cabinet meeting opened with a
song. "Oh. What VIII We Do With
Dewey Reggie.