The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-06-11
THE RETIRED BURGLAR.
One of the Most Remarkable of HIS Many
Singular Experiences.

I'm the hall OF house that had visited one
night" said the retired burglar. Il found In
the umbrella can an umbrella that was the big
gest one | ever saw designed for private use.
II was a silk umbrella. and a moderately tight
roller. too. and evidently made for somebody
to carry; but 1t was as big as those umbrellas
you see opened out over the drivers seat on
wagons and trucks. And in the same can was
n cane. or what supposed was cane. that
was as big as drum majors baton: thought
first maybe that's what 1t was but that
wouldn't account for the umbrella: a drum
major wouldn't want any bigger umbrella than
anybody else would.
but | was still more surprised when l
turned away from this can and started
through door from the hall into the parlor;
| had come up into the hall from the cellar.
This door into the parlor should think was
nine feet high-eiGht and half sure. I'd
never seen any such doors in my life. any
where; they went almost plumb up to the
ceiling: and there was the Same kind of door
from the parlor into the dining room back Of
1t. And In that dining room. among the chairs
standing around the dining table there was
one an arm chair. at ono end that was the
biggest chair l ever saw at all: IL seemed as
though It must have been made for some great
giant. l pulled II out from the table and
sat down in It. When l worked myself
floor. and when put my arms up on the arms
OF this chair had to put EN- up like chicken
does its wings when it's half walking and half
sort OF flying. running along the ground.
Why. say. 1t made me feel like a big baby
sitting up there. and laughed when slipped
down. Then showed the chair back In place
think I'm stickler for order. for do hate
to see things lying around-and took . look
into the drawers of the sideboard.
1T seemed to me that there were more carv-
ing knives there without forks than I'd ever
seen before. but discovered in moment that
these were not carving knives. but table knives
Of very unusual size. discovered a moment
later forks to go with them. l never saw any
forks like 'em for size, and silver they were.
too: you could see that at u glance: and there
/ should think. four times as big as an ord-
nary tablespoon. They made me laugh when 1
looked at en-. same as the chair had they were
SO different from the ordinary run OF things.
! suppose must have been stupid not to real
ize by this time what 1t all meant. but didn't.
ri didn't put away, that silver, in my bag, I
watches da%on I@ and know nee what
not up there and | thought IL / needed any
fuIl load upstairs; or anything Of value. why
tprnsd away frS% the a BOARD my ' l fs
glinted along the handle OF one Of The big
spOOuS, anu Il UlCheu tIdl up ana put IL In my
eye, and Ilpieked it up kind o. half involun-
tary Then went on upstairs.
There was one room opening off that up
stairs hall that had door the same height as
the ones I'd seen downstairs. eight and a half
my lamp around inside Of that room I struck 1He
bed that looked to me. under those circum-
was really about ten-and lying on that bed
was man that made me think Of the shapes
you see around in different parts OF the coun-
try on the tops OF hills and mountains that the
people OF the neighborhood call the old man
Of hs III The sn and
suppose ] must have been kind o. thought
Less and tck sSt i my lamp against the
lying on his left side with his back toward wa M me
He must have been awake or else he was very
he Just rolled over as he lay onto his right
side; facing me; and, all In the same move;
EN- to the floor. while he raised his body at
the same time. and almost before l realized 1t
he. was sitting up on the edge OF the bed.
dug out The fact us is S tRnS kin Kind 'n' Upset
me little. I'm not accustomed to losing my
spite of what I'd seen downstairs the giant
and don't believe he ever looked so big to a
living soul when he showed in the circus-I
who was living here In comfort-as he did kiaH to
foot bed; !, And il he was as auick and
wouldn't nave been in 1t at ali with him. and
inst Is. simply got out as quickly as could.
down pulled that fig spoon out Of my outside
those big spoons and forks. il there was room
Tor them. this one spoon was the only thing |
ad TIE ws xhGe h hss R
relic Of an odd experience, and We made It
useful. too: ! bent the handle up at a suitable
R%fte and we've used 1t ever since for soup