davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

tain all the features of the original
architecture. The old centers OF
French life, st. Louis cathedral and the
French market, are no longer dominat-
ed by the Creoles. They have been
wrested from them by the Italians who
live by thousands in the ancient dwell
ings of the original settlers.
The only custom which these Italians
seem to have acquired from their
French neighbors is an inveterate OBJ
lection to sunlight and fresh air, for
walk of several miles, on bright
spring morning, failed to disclose
single open shutter anywhere. And the
shutters to which this alludes are not
mere blinds. They are made of solid
boards, locked with padlocks and other
safety contrivances, and applied to
doors as well as windows. In summer
the shutters are opened in the evening;
in winter they remain Theoretically
sealed; and this queer state of affairs
seems to prevail among the wealthy as
well as the poor The combination of
odors which pervades these houses must
be smeled to be appreciated; a de-
scription in words would not do justice
to the variety Of French and Italian
cookery nor to the possibilities of the
olfactory organ.
The portions of the French section
inhabited by the better classes are char
acterized by large gardens surrounding
the various mansions which, though
gray from age, reflect the Importance
of the people who dwell within their
walls. OF all exclusive creatures on
American soil the upper-tendom Creole,
especially if of the feminine gender, is
the proudest and most provincial, equal
in every respect to the high-caste
Brahmin who considers social inter-
course with interiors and foreigners a
sacrilege. 1t is said that some of these
Creole danes, although born and reared
in New Orleans, have never crossed
J Canal street. which is the dividing line
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
THE CRESCENT CITY.
In Many Respects New Orleans Is
Without a Rival.
The Ubiquitous IcOnOcIRst, However,
Il Hard at Work and In Rapidly
MOderniElng Thought and
Action.
[spee!al New Orleans Letter. ]


New Orleans certainly is sui generis.
There is no other city like it in the
world. 1t combines the customs of an
era that has passed away in all other
American towns with progressiveness
that is surprising the nation. Its popu-
lation, numbering 100000, is thorough
ly cosmopolitan. Americans, Creoles,
Frenchmen, Germans, Italians, Span
iards and negroes live together in unity,
yet each nationality has its special dis
trict or faubourg wherein it preserves
provisional customs, virtues and vices.
The Creoles, descendants of the early
French settlers who came to America
with Bienville some 200 years ago, are
the "oldest inhabitants" and have, with
characteristic tenacity, preserved the
manners and traditions of their fathers.
Not until very recently have the
scions of this proud and ancient race
consented to meet their American fell
low-citiZens on a social level; and
among the elders of the French colony
there still are scores who refuse to look
upon the yankees" as equals. The
younger generation, however, have out
grown the prejudice of their elders
Intermarriages are frequent; and these
unions between Saxon and Gaul have
as rule, proved beneficial to both races
and called into being a new type OF
American-physically perfect, and
combining the poetic temperament and
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
SERIOUS HINTS ON DRESS.
Accompanied by Some FliDpant Come
mentH by n Boston
MAN.

We have received little pamhlet
which we hope has been distributed
widely among our readers, observes the
Boston journal. The careful study of
1t may put an end to doubts that have
embittered households and poisoned
the wells Of domestic happiness.
This little boolt-we dislike the term
"booklet"-tells in simple language
how to dress your coachman, groom,
butler, doorman and page.
Thus, for instance, the coachman
should wear six buttons on his coat
two on the back at waist and two at
the bottom of skirt. He should also
have flaps on his pockets. Otherwise
he might be mistaken for the groom,
who has no flaps on his pockets and
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

Jones will git fined SIS and costs fur not
hevin' his ltickin' masheen in good con-
dition!"
The president helped himself to n
glass of water, wiped the dew off his
spectacles and kindly inquired If any
body had seen Elder Toots within the
last month. The elder was only ten
feet away, and he looked anxious and
worried as he rose up.
"Elder Toots," softly began Brother
Gardner, did you eber meet up wild de
tranquility of de precarious retlec-
tion?"
"No, sab, neber did"
"Did it eber occur to you dat de
munifcence of de problematical might
enter into de radiation of de epitome?"
mo, sah."
"You will scuse me fur akin de
questions, elder, but day or two ago,
when you was buyin' spool of thread
in a store, heard you tellin' de clerk
dat OWN to de impressiveness of de
fluctuation you felt obleeged to prevent
de ostensible deliberation. You know
what you meant, don't you?"
"Not skassely, sah."
"Was it your objeck to paralyze dat
clerk?"
81 reckon it was"
"And reckon you did it. At least,
he thinks you ar fool or a lunatic.
Now, den, one brief word to you and AN
others. Dis foolin' wild de English
language has got to stop or dis Lime
Kiln club will be busted all to smash.
When you want Goldfish go to de gro
Gerry and AK fur it in so many words.
When you talk of war pollyticks or re-
ligion, you don't need any big words.
I'm all out O. patience wild SIGH foolin'
around and fur de last time warn you
dat de elimination of de infatuation
will lead to a convolution of de pers-
piration. We will now pour de con-
tents of de WATERFALL into de fire and go
home"
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

DE grocer didn't fall dead, but he will
not be a well man again for some
weeks. Jest what did you mean by
dem words, Brudder Shin?"
81 dunno, sah," was the hesitating
reply.
"Was it your object to paralyze dat
grocer?"
Cant say"
ibid your words refer to 'taters,
-'lasses, watermillyons, or what?"
Dunno"
81 thought not. You may sit down,
Brudder Shin. You jest picked up dem
words one by one, and when de time
come you shot 'em off altogether. If
you imagine dat you lowered de price
Of Eaters any let me tell you dat you
am mistaken, and dat de captation of
de duration will soon dominate de
jurisdiction. In other words, de next
time l cOtch you putin frills on de
English language you will come yere
to find de doah locked agin you and
your name crossed off de rolls.
'And Brudder Bebee," said the presi-
dent, us he motioned for that individual
to arise, 81 hev a few words to say to
you. / happened into place de odder
- day whar' Is Guild men was shoot
i'm craps. / was lookin' for my lost
.dawg You was one of dem IS men.
You didn't see me, but heard you say
dat de climax of de occasion appre-
hended de similitude of de paragon /
writ de words down in my book, and
yere dey am. Will you kindly explain
de pint you was tryin' to make?"
''We was talkin' bout de wah, l
reckon" replied Brother Bebee in
shame-faced manner.
ooh! l see! And did dem big words
of yours refer to boom-shells, or
WHAT"
Reckon it was boom-shells, sab"
Eyes? Did you ever see a boom
shelf"
mo, sab"
"Well, l hev. Dey was invented to
diff folkses up in de air and blow em
all to pieces. 1 will gin you one week
to git de kinks out O. your tongue and
git back to de plain English language
At de end of dat time, if you heven't
done it, you will find a bomb-shell
waitin' fur you at de head of de alley
stairs, and de pomposity of de aftilia-
ton will produce consanguinity to
articulatc de diaphragm, In plain Eng
aish, Brudder Bebee, dat boom-shell
will scatter you ober square mile of
territory, and your wilder will begin
loOl1in' around fur man wild sense in
his head. You look tired and home
sick, and you may now sot down"
AS Brother Bebee fell back on his
chair with a great jar the president
asked for Shindig Watkins. The broth
er WINS in his place, and as he stood up
he was asked:
"Brudder Watkins, was you in a
woodward de odder day TO git job?"
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
A PROFESSIONAL "FLoeGER. "
He Ii an EngIlshmRn and He Says He
Never Punished the Same
Man Twice.

The writer was the other day intro
duced to stalwart warder of one of
our great convict establishments, by
no means unlsindly looking man, who
for many years has been the official
wielder of the -nine-tails at the
prison where he serves, says Answers.
81 scarcely know how the new prison
bill will affect me, but have in the past
logged some scores of men with the
cat receiving an extra sum on my pay
of five shillings for each one operated
upon. l never logged one yet that
didn't deserve a good deal more than
he got; but, of course, this is my point
of view. OF perhaps so men to whom 1
have applied the cat-men ranging in
weight from eight to fifteen stone--I
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

between the French and American poU.
tons of the city.
But, as has been said, the younger
generation does not view this tradition
al prejudice with favor, and with its
passing away must be noted the disap'
pearance of ancient superstitions
among the lower stratum of French So
ciety. In religious way the French
people of Louisiana have chung with
marvellous fidelity to the Catholic OBJ
servances of century ago. They are
still firm believers in the efficacy of
amulets and relies, much more so than
the Catholics of the north. A favorite
pilgrimage of the young people of the
city is to the old cemetery of st. Roch,
wherein stands chapel containing
marble representation of the Corpus
| Christi. In this chapel there is large
square table with several hundred tin
| candlesticks. At the cemetery en-
trance votive candles can be purchased,
as well as diminutive images of st. JOS
! eph holding the Christ child. The
common belief is that the burning of
one of these candles, when accompanied
by prayer, will cause ones wishes to
be fulfilled, especially those of a senti-
mental nature. The image of st. JOS
eph, who, according to the tradition,
had a warm heart for love-sick SWANS
and damsels, in order to work wonders,
should be carried head down until ones
wish has come true, the argument be-
ing that the saint, prompted by nat
ural desire to be placed in a more COM
Portable position, will speedily answer
the prayers of the worshipers. OF
course, the faith in these and similar
manifestations obtains only among the
| ignorant, yet few visitors to the city
fail to burn candle at St. Rochs or re-
turn to their homes without an image
of st. Joseph in a brass casket.
Slowly but surely these ancient be-
liefs are dying out, and with them, too,
will depart more of the quaintness Of
Creoledom. But one interesting form
of population New Orleans will always
have-the negroes. And these negroes
| arc lllO lLOoI oulIllCSS anu lhOuS ullESH
of their race. Thousands of them live
in such abject poverty and squalor in
that part of the city which has by COM
mon consent been set apart for them
that truthful account of their mode
of existence would not be believed by
northern readers. Improvidence and
utter disregard for future needs seem
here to have reached the fullest meas
ure. And yet they appear to be happy
and contented, free from care and abb
solutely unconscious of responsibility
to themselves, their families Oh their
country. The man who said that full
stomach maketh a glad heart must
have had in view the negroes Of the
south, as nowhere else does the stom-
ach play so great part. 1t is, in fact,
the ruler of all things; and nothing
could create any social revolution in
Coontown as long as some sort of food
was obtainable. The matter of raiment
cuts no figure whatever. In fact, the
less said about it the better for everys
body concerned. G. W. WEIPPERT.
Forty-two million pounds of India
rubber were imported into North
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

have never known but one who bore the
punishment without yells, or, at least,
groans. a great deal depends upon the
man who Yields the cat as to the extent
of the pain, and much also depends
upon whether the cat is an old one, with
toughened thongs, or not.
"The understood, dissipated city
street-corner thief suffers the most,
strong fellows who have done outside
work for years not being affected in
anything like the same degree. AS for
the behavior of the logged, some of
them use awful imprecations, swear
ing, with awful oaths, how they will re-
venge themselves; more still yell unin-
telligibly, like whipped children. The
doctor present largely regulates my
own efforts. have never had to fog
the same man twice; | do not think any
warder in England ever had to do So"
Can't Blur the Coroner.
London coroners are sticklers for
their rights. A box held at railroad
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
dress; for it is sad sight when the
groom is mistaken for the master.
ouesn Victoria LIberaI-Minded.

Some one once asked frequent Wis
itor to the table of Queen Victoria:
what do you talk to the queen about?"
Everything" was the reply. "Ev-
erything and anything. There is no
topic on which her majesty is ignorant.
She appears interested in everything
and accepts all new ideas and views
with large-mindedness which is sim
ply astonishing in woman of her age"
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
A.pcaaap e~@@O G@@~D G->0mNl-0 D0~0 SagS@SOgs
~ Brother Gardner. ~
He Has Some Remarks On - ~ BY NJ QUAD.
4 English As She Spoke" Wv Copyright 1875
Brother Gardner

When the routine business Of the
regular meeting of the Lime-Kiln club
had been concluded, Brother Gardner
arose and looked up and down the
.aisles over his spectacles and said;
"Doorin' de past two weeks hey bin
,clusly watchin' sartin members of dis
club, and ! hev bin panied and grieyed
ito diskiver dat de advice ] hev fire.
4quently given has gone fur naught. A
dozen times in de last three years !
hev advised and cautioned against de
way a majority of you use de English
language, but IL pears to hev done no
good. Ebcr since was 'lected presi-
dent OF dis Lime-Kiln club ] hey sot
you an example in dis matter, heV
spoken plainly and simply, sayin' what
j meant and meanin' what said. De
English language as she is spoke am
good huff fur anybody. Nobody need
so huntin' around fur big words to
make hisself understood Nobody need
lose his breath in findin' language to
ask dc way to de post Office or de time
% day.
"'If Brudder Samuel Shin am wild us
we're tonight he will riz up" continued
the president, after a rather painful
pause.
Samuel had crowded in behind the
stove and was just falling asleep, and
he was long minute in getting out
where he could be seen. Then Brother
,Gardner said
"Budder Shin, de odder day, when
you was buyin' Eaters in a grocery,
heard you say to de grocer dat de am
biguity Of de sinuosity didn't pear to
he commensurate wild de comparison
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

station recently, owing to the railroad
officials having lost the waybill, was
opened, though it was consigned to a
Hamburg museum, and the body of a
young woman and two skulls were
found inside. The young woman was a
mummied Peruvian and the skulls were
prehistoric, yet the coroner of the dis
trict insists on holding inquests on both
mummy and skulls unless the museum
people have them removed.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
BY M. QUAD.
Copyright, 1898.

"Y-yes, sah' was the reply.
"Did you notice an old bald-headed
Guild man soGter hangin' around
dere"
"No, sab"
"Well, dere was one, and 1t was me.
| sorter wanted TO hear what you
would say to dat man. When he axed
IL you had had any experience in run
min a saw you answered dat you had,
and dat de emergency of dc homestead
had always iubilated de nonresident.
DO quote your words correctly, sab y"
FL reckon"
"And as to DER meanin'? hev
worked in woodward myself, but |
can't make out what dey refer to. Do
dey mean dat you am hustlerY"
"Yes, sah."
ibid de woodward man so under
stand"
"Reckon not, sab"
"No, reckon he didn't. In fact, I'm
sure he didn't. wasn't fur off when he
riz up and took you by de collar and
put his foot agin you and bounced you
out. He didn't know you was tryin'
to tell him dat you was a hustler from
Hustleville, and could keep dat sawred-
hot all day long, and so it was bad fur
you. I've got jest word to say to you.
De next time you come up yere you
will find Brudder Giveadam Jones
waitin' on de stairs. You jest inquare
of him if de perspicacity of de reso-
luton has absorbed de climax of de
catastrophe, and he will begin de work
of maxim you feel weary. If you don't
drap back on plain English befo you
strike de bottom step den Brudder
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
Lakes of Killarney.

The Irish land court will soon offer
the most admired portion of the Lakes
of Killarney for sale. The Muckross
estate has already been sold to the
tenants, and the mansion, deer park,
etc, will be offered with the lakes. The
sum mentioned as likely to be asked is
100000.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
England Rest Lighted.

The English is the best lighted coast
in the world. Of the 1886 lighthouses
in existence, Sc are scattered round
England's rocky coast, some of the
lights being so powerful that they are
visible 20 miles out at sea.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

Judge-Do you mean to state that
you recognize that the letter was writ
ten by the prisoner by the character
of the handwriting?
Witness-Naw, yer honor; the man
who wrote that letter never had no
ENTHUSIASTICALLY Life.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08
Her WAY.

May-It's funny thing for Tom
Justwed to call his wife little insur-
gent.
Dot-An insurgent? Why?
MAXWELL, you see, every time they
have fight she always looks for a cash
promise.-Judge.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

She-How can one go about applying
foI divorce?
He-Well, applying flatiron to the
side of his head is a pretty good way.
indianapolis Journal.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

The people of the United States con-
sumo about 100000 bottles of pickles
every week.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

Sir Thomas Lons
the
e
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1899-06-08

Forty-two million pounds of India
rubber were imported into North
America last year.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-09-14
He Failed AS an Educator.

The story is true, but it's rough on
the lawyer. He is fond of his children
and has hobby for trying to teach
the small fry great lessons by simple,
pleasant means. He often collects a
crowd on the square and displays a toy
engine. This he winds up, and as the
wheels go round he will explain the
principles of steam as applied to loco
motion. Then he gets kite and tells
the chestnut about Franklin. He al
ways has something to display and talk
about. One day as he walked out
to the street small boy and his moth
u, who had recently moved into the
neighborhood, came along. ooh, ma,
look, look; there he isl shouted the
small boy, pointing toward the lawyer,
there's the crazy man wat goes around
up here with them playthings'
Any one wishing a supply of second
hand engines, kites, lead ducks and
magnets can secure them now for
mere song. The owner has gone out OF
the philanthropy business.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-09-14
WITH THE HuMoRlsT,


Lulu, what a lovely bronze Bee
thoven!"
Isn't he sweet? I use him to prop
the door open; he isn't always falling
over and breaking his nose, like that
plaster Mozart Chicago Record.
MIR. Junks has written a poem in
memory OF his departed wife"
is that so? l hope he'll get it pub
lished before he marries again. Chi
oago Record.
The Teacher-Where is the caribou
found? Thomas, you may answer.
Tommy Tucker-The caribou is found
m the Caribbean sea.-Chicago Trib-
une.
Mrs. A-But can't the dear little
things father suggest some name?
Mrs. B.-Yes, every night his father
calls him new name, but I'm afraid
they wouldn't do.-Chicago Daily News.
81 believe" he said thoughtfully,
that Miss Jenkins intends to marry
me-"
What makes you think so?"
Il asked her to go to church with
me, and she wanted to know if we
couldn't just as well go to the minis
Explanatory.
Guest-You charge more for porter
house steak than you used to do. Why
is it?
Proprietor of Restaurant have to
pay more for it. The price of beef has
gone up.
Guest-The stake is smaller than it
used to be, too.
Proprietor of Restaurant-That, Of
course, is on account of the scarcity Of
beef.-Chicago Tribune.
PERSONALS.
Daniel Lamont's private fortune is
now said to reach S5,000,0O0.
Alexander Henderson of Syracuse
has acted as pallbearer at the funeral
of 172 of his friends during the last
fifty years.
Two divinity students are working
their way through Yale by doing job
printing The name of the firm is
Clark & Watkins.
Of the Vatican's 1000 rooms, Pope
Leo has reserved for his personal use
only three-a small parlor, a little din
ing room, and bed room.
Queen Wilhelmina of Holland meas
ures AZ inches around her bust, which
is only two inches less than the bust
measurement Of the portly Queen of
England.
81 hear you have wide acquaint-
ance," some one remarked to Con-
gresham Allen of Mississippi. "Well
yes" replied the humorist. 81 should
say that Barnes weighs 300 pounds"
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-09-14
Wonderful Caves.

The Bellamy caves in Cuba, situated
three miles from Matanzas, rival the
Mammoth cave of Kentucky, for, though
they are smaller they far exceed it
in beauty Of formations. The Gothic
temple" is about $50 feet long and It's
feet wide, filled with wonderful stalac-
titles and stalagmites. A second series
Of caverns is reached through long,
descending corridors and up ladders.
placed almost perpendicularly.
The stalagmites in these farther
caverns are colossal, all covered with
crystal moss and lichens in tracery so
fine that it reminds one Of frost work
on window panes By holding torch
back Of some Of these formations and
looking through them, their full beauty
Is brought out Samples Of these beau
tiful formations in the open light show
that they are purest crystal, without a
spot or flaw. Between 10 and Is miles
Of this wonderful chain of caves have
been explored, yet probably only the
smallest part Of them has been seen by
human eyes.
1t Is we'll known that robbers and
pirates used these caves as a rendez-
vous years ago, and some enterprising
explorer may some day be well repaid
for his exertions in searching for treas.
ure.-San Francisco Argonaut.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-09-14

Helen, footsore and weary from
sightseeing, sank down gratefully on
the steps of the Government building.
She had listened to the strains of La
Paloma," played by the band, and
watched the last red tasseled hat of
the musicians disappear in the colon
nades. She had seen the drill of the
life saving crew and their gallant res
cue Of the victim daily drowned in the
lagoon. She had paid her respects to
King Corn and had viewed Hawaiian
products from standpoint of owner
ship. Now she refused to go a step
farther and allowed her friends to go
without her to criticise the impress
sionistic wonders of the Art building.
4 She made pretty picture, With her
dark hair and eyes and somber gown,
MS she leaned YEARLY against white
column Of the building. The gondolas
glided softly down the lagoon in the
midst Of the splashing fountain. The
buildings were dazzingly white In the
rays Of the afternoon sun. The colon