The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-06-28
HuMoRs OF CHRIsTENINGs.
Stories of Funny Things That Have
Happened at BnptismRI Fonts.

From London Tit Bits.
The principal person al a christening is
sene&a!ly too young 20 take any active
part ipsthe ceremony beyond crying loudly
-withoutswhich, an some localities, tho
christening is not considered lucky" the
baby's likelihood of good fortune being
measured by the vigor of his crying. But
at the very drst service of the kind at
which the writer OBLIGATED the recipient
of the baptismal name distinguished him.
self and brought confusion on the bashful
ana inexperienced young person OF those
| long-ago days; for It was not untl long
| afler that memorable first baptism that l
lost all fear of dropping the infant and a
notion that a baby is kept together by its
| clothes and may at any moment fan to
pieces II not very carefully handled. 1t
was double event; that is to say. two
chidren of the same family were present.
ed for baptism together.
In another case well known to me eight
children of one family had been saved up,
and seven were marched to church as an
escort to the eighth, and all were baptized
| together, the father afterward intimating
that the vicar ought to knock summat
| on the fees on the usual principle of "a
| reduction for quantities, like" In my case
there We're only two. and l found one OF
them one too many for my peace of mind,
for he-a boy Of some years of age
startled and amused the congregation and
COMPOUNDED me, when In the ACT Of sprink-
Ing the water on his brow, by Justify
singing out, Here, drop II, W n yer!' Per-
haps the protest was natural, but It was
highly disooncer ing.
Generally, however, the recipient of the
name Is quiescent--eXcept in the matter
Of irresponsible yelllng-hut the parents oc-
| casionally furnish such amusement. and
especially is tho demand made 10 them,
Name this child" sometimes provocative
of very queer responses indeed.
| am not now referring to the eXtraordi-
nary combinations of high-soundlng names
with which some ambitious parents bur-
den their offspring though now and then
they are sufficiently mirth-provoklng. par
ticularly when preliXed to an ultraplebe-
Ian surname. Florence Bertha Made
laiue Victoria Snagglos' the homogeneous
title rings in my memory after many years
lis a case in point. This surname, by the
way was not "Snaggics, but it was quite
as full Of pathos as that.
| / have IL on the authority of an entirely
veracious clerical friend that on one oc-
casion he was staggered, on saying Name
this child" by the response. "Lucifer" -
as he thought. "What2" he asked
"Luthy, SIR repeated the lsping and now
blushing mother; and this time my friend
graspod the situation and dealt with the
infant Lucy accordingly.
One child was actually chrlstened and
registered Robert Honly," instead OF
plain Robert on account of his mothers
anxiety TO prevent the addition of Sec
ond name The clergyman had not quite
caught what she said, and asked for rep
EDITION. Robert" said the parent; then,
fearing lest the parsons defective hearing
should result in error. she hastened to say
Robert lonly." The M made all the
difference.
one curious case came under my notice
i'm the Mdlands many years ago. When
asked for the child's name the village ma
tron replied. "Senna-tea," or what sound
ed like 1t. The astonished cleric asked for
"A repetition of the name. Again came,
more distinctly than before. "Senna-tea."
There was a pause and general bewilder-
ment. At length the pew-opener hit on
the solution, and, bending toward the per-
picked clergyman, she whispered, "She
means 'Slnnetta sir" and all went well.
The explanation was simple-and roman
TIC Sinnetta was the name Of a gypsy
buried I'm a neighborlng churchyard. The
handsome gypsy girl had been wooed and
won by an autocrat, but had pined away
and died. Her heart-brolen husband mad
her buried near his hall and placed over
her a plain white marble tomb bearing the
simple name, "Sinnetta." Possibly moved
by the romance, certainly attracted by he
unusual name, the good woman wished
her child to be so called.
The following Is almost too strange to
be believed; 1t actually happened, never
theless
The baby was proudly borne, amid ad-
miring relatives and neIghbors to the
font and duly presented for baptism.
Name this child"
"Beelzebub."
"What?"
'Beelzebub."
but. my good woman, you can't call
the child that"
TITS q Scriptur' name, SIR, amt it?''
Eyes, but do you know what 1t means?
1t Is impossible to call that child 'Beeze-
bub.' Give him a good, sensible name.
Call him John, say"
As no protest was Immediately made,
John" the child was duly named and
the parson congratulated the baby on
having gained a plain, honest name, and
himself from having saved the poor mite
from being saddled with title which
would have become lntolerable
But his satisfaction was short lived,
and he was speedily shaken out OF hts
congratulatory mood by the hurried re-
turn Of the mother. Fastening down the
aisle, she brought her baby back 10 the
font before the parson had had time to
leave it, and exclaimed in CONSERVATION,
as II the dlsconcerting anomaly had only
just struck her: Johns a wench. sir"
Sure enough, the baby was a girl, and
another name had TO be found and con-
ferred.
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