The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1899-08-30
INTRODUCING BILLY.
" LII this was overheard in . hote
~ lobby:
"Ilello, Billy"

Hello, Il ON.
You're here, are you? Been waiting
bngp
ii just this minute sat down. You're on
the dot"
Il was afarid you wouldn't get the note"
81 found it in the box this morning. Where
is this place you're going to take me|
Its a garden-away out on the North
side. I've got an open carriage outside there
beautiful night for ride"
"And the wifeY
"She's out therein the carriage"
"Well, let's not keep her waiting. I'm
ready. (Starting)
"Say-hold on; you needn't throw away
your cigar. Sit down. She can wait mo.
ment"
i "Well, maybe she can but can /? You
must remember that I've never seen the
wife"
you'll get good look at her presently.
Before we go out there l want to refresh
your memory"
"Do what"
Refresh your memory. You know, we
were together last evening"
"Were WEI"
1--WE were-unless you want me to pay ali
mony. Don't you remember? You see, yes
Iterday afternoon thought possibly you were
in town already, so | came around to the
hotel about half-past FIVE and found you
here. You were delighted to see me, OF
icourse-roomed together at college, frater-
nifty brothers, shaved with the same razor
and all that. You insisted that take din
ner with YOU"
did II"
Il should say you did. You insisted very
strongly You said that you would be Of
Tended if | didn't cut everything else and
dine with you. tried hard to tear myself
away. You may remember how pleaded
with you. | told you that my wife was wait
ing for me at home, that her sister had come
over from the North side to spend the day,
and that if l didn't appear at dinner she
wouldn't speak to me for week. Then you
said that an old friend had some claims that
even wife could not disregard. You said
that l could dine with my wife every other
day in the year, but this was the one day
that l had to give over to the Oldest and best
friend of my boyhood days."
at seems that l was quite determined to
have you dine with me-"
BILLY, you were simply immovable. You
wouldn't take mo- for an answer. You or
dered dinner for two while l was trying to
break away. You were positive that my wife
the circumstances"
II am to remember all this, am II"
"You are to remember all that, and more.
You are to be prepared to tell what we had
for dinner repeat portions OF the converse
ton, mostly in regard to the dear old days
in college, and testify that drank only two
glasses of wine"
"a cheerful prospect; but can't say that
I'm much surprised You may recall that
had to do more or less lying for you when we
roomed together"
II know, Billy; but this is different. It's
easy enough to fool the faculty, but it takes
an artist to convince my wife that there's
nothing wrong when fail to show up for
dinner and don't get in until two o'clock In
! the morning."
"Was it as bad as that"
"Well, that's merely rough outline Of it. >
| Where were you, anyway
IT was with you"
"Yes"
ooh, yes. This is where you have to dc
some more refreshing. You will recall that
we sat at the table for at least an hour talk
ing over old times and then we went up Il
your room"
"Why did we go up there2"
GIVE got that all fixed. We went up Their,
to look at some photographs-old friends o.
ours, college friends
at seems, Tom, that the college them,
runs all the way through this masterpiece.
That's right. We sat up in your room
and talked about the men in our class, tn,
ball games we used to VIA,
ut wouldn't take rng to tell abou
those"
"And so on-about nearly everything, ex
cept girls. We didn't talk about girls, re
member that When was in school l wa
rather diflident, and knew only two or tire
girls in town"
Great Scotti"
'Now you've got general idea of tn
whole thing.
"NNhat would a man on his way to Vel
lowstone park want with lot of photo
graphs?"
That's what she asked l told her tina
you always carried them with you-one @
your peculiarities. We looked at these pho
tographs, fell into rambling conversation
and forgot all about the time until you hap
pened to look at your watch and told me i
was after one o'clock. l was horrifed-ral
out and got into cab and went home"
"And she believes it, does She"
"She will il you corroborate the Who'll
thing. Here, watch me. Do you remembe
the sign of distress we used to have in tn
frat? Well, give it to you now"
"By George, Tom, you are wonder.
this is to be my introduction to your wife
Is it! I'm to start out being scapegoat TO
your sins? Do you know where was las
evening? Calling on an uncle out here O.
the West side, sitting on the veranda an
talking Christian science"
'You merely thought you were out Their.
As a matter of fact you were down her
with me-"
Talking Of the beloved college days"
Happy college days"
From half-past five in the afternoon VI
til after one o'clock in the morning-in tn
house all the time, and the thermomete
ut co."
'I'u admit that the story might be in
proved, but it was the best could do in th
time had. Good or bad, it has been sprea
on the record and it must be backed up. Sh
asked me if it wasn't rather warm sitting /
hotel bedroom all evening, and / told he
that you had room on the tenth floor an
got fine breeze"
"But there are only seven floors in tn