The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1899-11-24

The development Of the real facts or
the campaigning in LuzOn, IS they are
being brought out the past few days by
officers and men Of the Twentieth
Kansas, has amazed the plain stay-at- !
home folk who have been but just now
50 superlatively RproarOus over the re- /
turned heroes, especially Generals |
Funston and Metcalf. They are a bit !
ashamed of their Partisan extrsvagan- !
ces Of fortnight since. To hear from
men Of character and reputation, who
we're right on the spot, eye witnesses,
that many Of the tremendous deeds of
Generals Funston and Metcalf at the
other side of the world were really, for
the most part, done on paper with q
lead pencil by Kansas reporter, has
been to say the least startling and dis
quieting And it makes the adulatiOn
that has been given the men of war
rather ridiculous, too. Think Of it, this
reporter having the chosen heroes risk
their lives over and over again-in his
dispatches-much as the press agent
Of a comic opera diva bathes his en-
plOyeress in milk, or robs her of a for
tune or so IN diamonds, and then all
America going wild over it! Isn't it a
joke? By the testimony Of officers and
soldiers who were most certainly on the
field Of battle at Guiguinto, though
they did not figure in General Fun
stOn's reporters glowing reports. Cen
eraI Metcalf was never in sight Of the
fighting there. He was 20 miles away,
or thereabouts, headed for the hospital
at Manila, having been struck in the
toe by a stray shot at the skirmish of
Bocoue, while from a half mile to a
mile in the rear Of the firing line, with
the reserves. He never got within ten
miles of GuiRuinto. And yet Metcalf
has been brevetted brigadier general
for his gallantrY in that battle!
Then there was Funston. He was
herOfied and duly promoted for stories
Of natatOry feats that delighted the ma
ton. He scored in the newspapers the
country over as a later day Bayard,
without fear and without reproach. He
got to be the central figure Of the
whole disturbance in Luzon. And now
it develops that, after all, this Ajax,
according to Lieutenant Callahan, lay
ingloriOusly on his stomach behind a
rice dyke at GuiguintO in mud and
safety, while the fighting went forward
under the leadership Of his unadver-
tised lieutenant colonel. And Funston
never plunged into the Bagbag in the
face Of a hail of bullets and led his
men in an amphibious charge. Neither
did he breast the turbid floods Of the
Rio Grande "while the Mauser bullets
zip tipped about him" All this he has
been credited with, but it was the press
agents work.
However, the public does love hero.
And since it was out Of the question to
keep up the hurrah over Funston and
detcalf, what was the matter with their
press agent? There was surely a gen
ius in his line. Why not have him up
on a pedestal? He may be famous yet,
no telling. But even the hero-maker
is a good deal of a sham. He was not
really original in his schemes. There
was the original famous sentence he
put in FunstOn7s mouth about holding
his ground until his regiment was mus
tered out. That came from an old civ
il war story. Somebody dug it up in
an old bOOk-a copy of every book that
ever was written is to be found some
where in Kansas.
Fur Their yet, take the swimming sto-
ries. More plagiarism. Nobody in
that country, from Maine to Califor-
MIA, or from the lakes to the gulf, but
knows the Original-the old, old lyric
of the darling daughter whose mother
consented to her going out to swim
provided she'd use a hickory limb as a
clothes tree and wouldn't 60 near the
water.
What lamentable tumbIes the Twen:
tieth Kansas romances are taking.
Kansas City Times.