The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1899-12-29

y
capitalists will get street railway
franchise. Further than that lie un.
certain.
The editor of the Cherryvale Clarion
who has been assuring the world that
that IL the best town this side of the
New Jerusalem, wants to sell out.
The Moran Herald says that col
ored boy at that place froZe his feet
and they swelled considerably. He
is now one the features exhibited to
visitors.
The Cofleyvile city court officials
offer to retire from the salary and go
on the fee list, in which case the life
of evil doors will he as miserable as
those of their neighbors.
One firm in Topeka has refunded
81 ,000, 600 worth of Kansas school and
township bonds inside the last year
In every case the interest has been
reduced | to 2 per cent.
Here is cheerful lie from the Ar
kansas City Ira veIer: An Arkansas
City man Complains that his wife dis.
turbs his sumbers by tickling the
bottoms of his feet with her toes after
they have gone to bed.
Conner Davies emphasizes his polit-
ical faith by getting out Is pages in
one issue of the Concordia KansaH.
He ADMITS himself that II was never
done under a Democratic admins
tratiOn.
One Of the most popular ad. cuts
with the country papers right now Is
that of man kissing girl. The
| "a 80 -, a
the premises are so obvious and
varied.
Arkansas City Traveller A Second
ward woman has grieved herself to
shadow because the fortune teller
told her that she would die before her
husband and that he would marry
again. She fears that her husband
will love his second wife the best.
Topeka State Journal A new cure
for rheumatism has been discovered.
| 1t Ia called the whale bath. The
! treatment consists in deposting the
patient i'm the body of a dead whale.
Almost invariably the patient lie able
90 climb right out unassisted. Re-
markable cures are reported.
The editor of the Neosho Falls Post
says he wants to buy a few shoats.
1t is not, however, this editorial "wen
who wants the shoats, but the post
master 81. ."
Tie Topeka Capital thinks that the
biggest gossip in each neigh I orhood
should be given the job of census
enumerator, but this would mean an
other election to make the choice.
The Jail at Emporia, which houses
the city's and county's wicked, is
empty, for the first time in years.
"However," says the Gazette, "don't
get gay, there's light in the window
for you"
rhe wild young people of leisure at
Newton now lunch at the new cafe,
named the "Idlewylde" Newton is
railroad town and the name was
stolen, doubtless, from a Pullman
sleeper.
A Florence youth stole the penny
in-the-slot machine from the depot
and an extra guard has to be kept
around his prison to keep the indig-
nant and disappointed populace from
| lynching him.
A travelling fiddler who played
"The Mocking Bird" at Chanute re-
Gently so moved his numerous hearers
that they showered half dollars ON
him. Eagles paying tribute to the
song bird is appropriate.
Leavenworth has despaired of John
Seaton's building an opera house,
and Ferdinand Mella offers 81 900 to
the man who will build one near his
place of business. Mella Is probably
one of the fellows who dispense
mella drinks in the regular Leaven-
worth way.
Vic Murdoch glances back INTO the
past and says: "a man may come to
throne or a million, but nothing
will ever appear as desirable to him
as little bag, made of mosquito net
ting, full of mixed candy, did on a
church Christmas tree when he was
| five"
AtchisOn Champion: If we should
publish the list of all the men who
will "swear OFF, drinking and smok-
ing on New YEARS. there would be
no room left for either news or adVer-
tisers, but If we should publish the
list of those who will execute their
promises without any failure, there
would be very trifiing consumption
of space.