The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1899-03-24
WAYS OF WOMEN'S CLUBS.
What 1t Means Now to BE Distinguished
Guest.


| Guest.
Were you ever a distinguished guess
at woman's club?" said Mrs. Pepper
to Mrs. Pickle
Me? No! Not at woman's club 0,
anywhere else.
well, if l We're you I'd begin yer.
soon"
Il couldn't be a distinguished guest
at anything. An insignificant body like
me,'
Weren't you the secretary pro tenn
OF the Orkazoo Tuesday club three
years ago."
Yes. but"
| ''That's all that's necessary. You'll
appear on the list as the ex-secretary.
and so forth. And what I was going to
| say was that, if you know when you're
well off, you'll make your debut soon.
| This role of distinguished guest is get
! ting more exciting all the time. I've
| been at it now for several years, but
I'm not sure that I can keep at it sew
eral years longer.
When ! was first invited to be a
guest of some friend at her club lunch
con or breakfast l went, ate and was
filled-with papers and talks and bouil-
len and croquettes. That was all right
Then there was a change. 1 got to the
point that, at a certain stage of the
get up and say: Ladies', we have with
us this afternoon a number of friends.
and, as | am sure you would all like to
know who they are, the secretary will
now read the Names
THAT wasn't bad at all. l can't say
that my bosom didn't swell with pride
to hear my full name announced with a
flourish. But things didn't end there
Pretty soon the president stopped call
iOp 'friprHE' vote 10
guests Then we developed into dis
tinguished guests That title became
Immediately popular and one Of the
freallish habits of almost all women 81
clubs now is to read a long list of WISH
tors under the heading of distinguished
guests
Not long after this title came into
fashion an enterprising club president
had the brilliant idea of asking each Of
the distinguished guests to rise when
her name was called. The secretary
would announce: Mrs. Myrtle Green
Pepper Then T would get up and
stand there, feeling like several kinds
of a fool and knowing. that 200 or 800
women were guying me in their Utmost
souls. I always felt as if the president
held me up as If she We're showing an
insect to a class in natural history
Still I made the best Of it. and by get
ting only about half way up and then
subsiding promptly. I shortened the
agony as much as possible. This ris-
ing for inspection has been the fash
ion for some time, but the other day
l had an experience which showed
me that the distinguished guest business
is capable of almost unlimited develop
ment.
Il had been invited to go to the
luncheon of a well known club and l
found myself, as usual, one of a half
dozen or more of visitors. After the
bouillon and croquettes part of the pro-
gramme was over the president cot up
and began the old. familiar formula:
Ladies, we have a number of distin-
guished guests here present with us to-
day and it gives me a great deal of
pleasure to have the secretary read
their names
"Then the secretary began: Mrs
Margaret Smith Brown, Mrs. Myrtle
One moment interrupted the pres
ident. I request that each lady rise
and bow when her name is called
And bow. That was a new wrinkle
I sat there and wondered how in the
world l could do it without adding a
Shrek of laughter to my bow. Ina CINE
the asininity of getting up and making
a bow as if you were a little school
girl about to say a piece. If she had
said for us to rise and turn a hand
spring, l couldn't have more confused
Well, the secretary again began with
Mrs. Brown. who got up and made her
little bow. | knew my turn was coming
next and, as ] was in the middle of the
room, with women to the right of
me, left of me and behind me, l won.
dered whether | would be requested &c
make four bows or would be let off
with one. | made one and dropped into
my seat, and the secretary passed on
Nov, l tell you the distinguished
guests of WOmen'S clubs have a great
career before them. The bow is bui
the beginning. Next they viii be re-
quested to rise, bow and turn slowly
on one foot. This will give the specta-
tors comprehensive view of the dis
tinguished guests, back as well as front.
After that they will probably be asked
to rise, bow, revolve slowly, close ana
open the eyes, smile, frown and give
various other detailed expressions. To
this may he added an injunction to
bring with them typewriter biograph-
zeal data. After a While they can be
asked TO bring also typewriter de-
ScriptiOns of the gown and hat worn,
stating cost, materials and anything
else of interest. Don't you see? There $
no limit to it. Now. if you think YOU
would object to being a distinguished
guest under such advanced conditions
| urge you to take your turn al it now
when you can get off with the injunction
TO make a pretty bow to the ladies' The
wheels of progress are moving, and the
distinguished guest is being hurried tc
unknown antics. New York Sun.
Professional Ethics.
he I,,.l