Daily press. [volume] (Newport News, Va.) 1896-current, 1899-07-08
THE uNpOETIc LAW
is About to Smash Up an l.rec,.
Lar and Artistic combinatdn.
TROUBLE AT sALTERS CRtRk
Tax ON the Revelation OF Hidden Futu
res:
the Menagerie Born Of Liquid Light :
Ing and the MILKY Way Across
the Moonless Night.

VI late there has been an assen,hl,,tr
or peculiarly heterogeneous conglon,
eratioh along the rccdy banks that en-
e'ose 'ne piacld, but unpicturcsuue
".efs Oh oas4srs Creek, which .wriccles
10 "ss''tercstlng way along tho victim.
.tS VI the boundary lne between tho
oiu free State Of Warwick and Eliz-
;sbeth City county.
nc aipfcsald aggregation is compriS-
sdToi sypsics, fishmongers. sandwich
manufacturers, con characters ana
ueaicrs in liquid lightning.
II you want to peer into the mvstc-
Aous future, il you are uncertain con-
eerilhE the events of your paet lirr
aho would like to refresh your mem
wy II you desire to know your f,tc
30 much per nervc-quivcr if Won ara
NeiH1s lor q closer acquaintance
Nf'ii me ozark haired man." or If you
a'e possessed OF an unconqucrnhlc long
- set me worst Of a bargain in
Nurse liesh. consult The gypsics.
~ az seized with a passionate
us aof pies or raging impulse to
..a,,,,,.. = nam sandwich apply to the
rough deal table which stands fra-
grant and greasy, beneath the shadow
OF the pines.
" YOU have had bad luck 1shinr mr.
MI YOU do not know how to fish IN,
would Ike to make your friends believe
tiiat you are Il second Walton. Won can
procure fish of all descriptions and in
auantltles to suit from the boy with tho
s',o"y lace and the ivory smile.
Nie you awcary Of llfe's listlcss, luck
less, routine? would you like to forget
your own troubles and rcycl in ms
woes OF others? Have you a secret in
spl1atlon to murder your best fricnup
AZ enere in your heart an unreasonable
anxiety to 'ninsle With u menageri. of
SNAKES Lizards. rats, bats and black
NOES flf you arc oppressed with any
81 these inclinations. cal! on the man
with the liquid lightning ana he will
attend to your case in a manner that
would make Bar lIarbo1- turn green
with envy
fAi TINS and much more may be found
along the edges Of the marshes and
we woods. I is all Very Irregular and
arcstlc. but the authorities Of Elizabeth
Clty county, sadly lacking in that 10
eelc quality SO necessary to The apprc-
eia'ion OF Irregular and artistic cordi-
eioils' nave determined either to smash
the whole irregular and artistic husi
iA'to q S'NhCd ITIJ demand
IN pehalf OF the county a just and legal
incense upon each and every lucrative
institution established III the neighbour
hood
10 this end a true and trustv officer
was yesterday dispatched to Salters
Creek to investigate and report. like,
wise to inform all concerned thai no
business Of a taxable nature world bc
permitted within the limits of the couu
~ unless the proper license be paid the
authorities
EVEN the picturesque sypsics fan
under the remOrSelcsS hammer or IN,
law and Will be smashed unless The re-
Aulfeheifts are complied with. That
Ivory smile set like a milky way across
moonless night must be measured at
so much {, yard and charged for at the
same rate. Those snakes and rats and
hogs, imnlaterial as they are, must sub
init to be taxed just as though they
We're Gagged and on exhibition.
what will the result be? Will Won
get an imperfect vision Of the future.
an anterior jag. and a vacant pic, for
your money? The customer pays the
tax. Or will the irregular and artistic
comblnation be dissolved and scattered
TO the fog winds?
Qulcn Sitbc?