The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1899-11-10
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A ROLL OF RED TAPE.
THE cIRcuMLocUTloN OF THE ENG
LlsH PosToFFlcE.

TrnyeIfngs and Troubles of n Citizen
Of the Great Metropolis In Elis At
terapt to Alai1 IA Little Package For
Delivery In New York.
In this greatest of all Cities London,
there is place called st. Martins lie
Grand, and in St Martins lie Grand
there is an institution which fills both
sides OF the street and in which every
man, woman and child of these blessed
islands has more or less of peculiar
interest. 1t is called the general post
office and is presided over by the latest
OF a long line of illustrious dukes and is
really very great concern indeed.
Well, went there the other day.
did not go on some extraordinary en-
] rand. did not wish to worry the duke
OF to discomfort the officials with uues-
lions as to the rules and regulations
AS a matter of fact, went to post Il
packet of photographs.
Now, it is a remarkable fact that al
though | have lived in London for a
| good many years had never previous
| ly posted anything at the general post
| Office. | should not have done so on
this occasion hut for the fact that the
| clerk at my local office had got more
than usually acute attack of asininity
and could not tell me for the life of
him What to do to get my modest pack
| ct of photographs off by that evenings
mail to New York.
| 1t wanted just five minutes to the
closing time for the American mail
when | arrived, hot and breathless
with my rapid walk in ST. Martins lie
Grand. wanted three things, my par
Gel weighed, the necessary stamps and
information as to where to post it.
Now, at most poStottices when you re-
quire stamps you make your way to
door In the immediate vicinity of the
posting slots, where you find the room
devoted to their sale
Not so at the London general post
office. l approached the nearest door.
A red braided official sitting on sack
asked what wanted.
Stamps" said
you'll get them in the building
across the street." he answered.
Dodging across the street, therefore,
at the usual risk of life which attends
such performance in this greatest of
all cities, l ran into room and I'D to
long counter, and, seeing close at hand
notice bearing the legend, Late fee,
foreign parcels" made for it and ask
ed the clerk to kindly tell me how
much that would take"
He told me to apply half way down
the counter. l did So, and, after
weighing my packet. another, clerk told
me it would take two penny 4halfpen-
ny stamp.
"And the late fee?" queried.
"Oh. do you want it to go by this
mail? Oh, all right. Another halfpen-
n.y."
Where must post it?" asked.
"Outside. across the street." he re-
piled.
CHANGING at the clock, l rushed out
and, diving across the thoroughfare
began careful study Of the various
posting slots to discover which particu-
lar one was for the reception of late fee
packets for the foreign mail..sI studied
in. vain, and, catching sight ofaanother
red braided official in corner L asked
him to direct me. After a look at nv
packet he said
Hand it over the counter across the
street."
With a remark not loud but Deep
once more lodged the traffic, charged
up the steps, upsetting two men and
boy on the way, and thrust my parcel
over that brass railing which the au-
thorities with much prudence and fore
sight have instituted in these establish
ments obviously to protect the so call
ed officials from the righteous fury of
an outraged public.
What is it?" asked the clerk.
81 assure you,' replied that this is
packet of photographs. tied round
with string and directed to New York"
well, you must post it across the
street." he said.
Steeling myself no frightful calm
ness, explained to him that had al
ready been three times across the
street over that same packet, but that
nevertheless l would cheerfully cross
it dozen times if the regulations Of
her majesty's service so directed. He
seemed hurt a little at my remarks, but
finally asked to have closer look at
the packet. At last:
''Take it to the other end of the coun-
ter" he directed. 'and ask the man
there"
did so, and, after answering one or
two further assinine queries as we'll as
my trembling sanity would allow. it
was accepted. and so at last | succeed
ed in posting packet of photographs
to New York.
And this is true story from 1.-The
greatest city in the world.'-London
Cor. New York Mail and Express.
FrenchwOmnn's Way of Lacing.
In the first place, silk corset strings
are invariably used. They are not
much more expensive than the cotton
ones and give far more satisfactory re-
suits. Three separate laces are re-
CURED. The top one is laced loosely
to give ease and fullness to the bust.