The Portland daily press., 1899-12-13
JOLLYING AN ANGLER.
Better sport Than Fishing for the
Questioner.

Catching anythingT'
The man to whom this question was
addressed sat on the end of pier pro-
jecting into the lake and held fishing
rod in his hand.
He squinted up at the questioner,
timber, elongated person in crash suit,
and replied:
"No. 357."
"Yes," rejoined tho elongated person.
81 think / comprehend. l am the three
hundred and fifty-seventh man perhaps
who has asked you this morning II you
were catching anythingT
The man with the fishing rod nodded
sagaciously.
II see no Indications of your havin:
made any great CATCH" pursued the 9th
er. MAY 1t not be that the exertion of
keeping tabs on your questioners absorbs
your mental energies so that you cannot
give your mind to the work of fshing|
The fisherman looked at him out of the
corner of his eye and grunted something
to the effect that the condemn fools
scared the fish.
1.-THE 356 condemn fools who preceded
me, thought think you remarked that
/ was the three hundred and ffty-sev-
enth-were drawn by idle curiosity, but
this Is business ON my part. l am out
for q morning walk, but l want a mess
of fish, and i am prepared to pay for 1t
In current coin Of the realm, wherefore,
II you have gathered enough ring perch
to make meal for three persons, includ-
ing domestic"-
"Do you take me for condemn dock
fsherman" angrily interrupted the man
with the rod.
why, certainly. What else are you?"
81 don't fish for living, you walled
eyed, grasshopper Legged
II beg your pardon. l see you don't.
A professional fisherman would have an
swered civil questions in civil manner.
You've been sitting here all this morn
ing, with the reflection of the sun shining
up in your face, counting condemn fools
and watching that line out there without
getting a nibble, all for the fun of the
thing. is that itY'
"Oh, don't know that it makes any
difference to you. Suppose you kind OF
chase yourself along the pier"
"You absolutely refuse to sell me
mess Of fishY
Don't get funny"
"will you take so cents pound for
what you've got and call 1t a days
work.?
'I'll tell you what think Of you
'Will you take 81 fish without re-
gard to weight or
"Say, what asylum for feeble minded
children did you escape fromT
"Will you take IS a fish for what you
have caught"
.I'll take something to you In a min
ute you won't like, you darned Old
"It's just as l supposed. You haven't
pulled in fish. You have dangled your
legs all morning over that pier and
haven't had bite. You haven't got az
much sense as the fish you are trying to
catch, I'm blessed II you have! You want
me to chase myself along, do you! DO
you own this pier, you cork headed idiot!
Does the atmosphere about here belong
to you? Do you pay taxes on the ozorg
that Hi, therel Look at your line!"
The man with the rod turned eagerly
to look at his line, but it was q false
alarm. The angular man in the crash
suit had cruelty deceived him.
"You doggoned old
"Don't bluster, my friend. You won't
have any better success in soaring mo
than you have In fishing. I've often won
dered what kind of human beings gather
on this pier to fish all day long with the
same kind Of luck you are having. 1
never saw one OF them catch anything.
My curiosity Is gratihed. 30 far as you
are concerned. Ii you should meet me
along the street anywhere, I'll take 1t as
a favor IL you won't speak to me. You're
the biggest ass I've met in the last
month. and that's saying a good deal:
With which parting remark he strolied
away, leaving the amateur fisherman
still dangling his legs over the pier and
swearing like a professional-Chicago
Tribune.