davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
upRoARTous APPAREL.
That Worn by the Young Man OF the
Period Would Make Solomon
Look Like Thirty Cents.

Some hopeful people had an idea last sum.
mer that the limit had about been reached
in the loud colors Of mems attire, in shirts,
ties, hosiery and soft hats, and that this
summer might see a return to more placid
and subdued hues and patterns as a sort OF
reaction. The advance styles in the win
dows of the haberdashers' shops indicate
that such hopes are vain and that linen and
things will this year be even more startling
than last season, if that be possible. Some
OF the shirts on display in the windows seem
to actually shrek through the glass at the
observer, and the width of the stripes is Of
the general style and pattern so long popu'
lar at Joliet penitentiary. These conversa'
tional shirts have gradually grown worse
and worse each year until now the pessimists
do not see how anything worse can happen
than the things which are now on sale.
The red hat affected by the college boy
last year and its side partner, the blue crush
hat, have rival this year in pale white hat,
with the under side Of the brim and also the
band of deep blue, making striking CON
trast of color, which seems to be what il
most particularly desired.
All the fashy patterns in hosiery, the
plaids, the reds and yellows and greens IN
combination, are once more to the fore, and
when the young man OF the period gets him
self up in all the colored trimmings he car
buy, with red and blue barred shirt ant
cuffs, white collar, a red hat and PLAID
hose showing above his low ties, he will
make Solomon in all his glory look like 81
cents.-Chicago Chronicle.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
AN EVEN EXCHANGE.
The Fortunate Outcome Of Bank
Messengers Heart-Breaking
Blunder.

"I was carrying $780, worth Of govern
ment coupon bonds from Washington to
Cleveland" said the bank messenger, land
the wisest thief couldn't have told whether
| had bonds or OLD clothes in the satchel.
How the change was effected could never
figure out, but in leaving the car picked up
the wrong satchel and had carried it half a
mile before the mistake was discovered.
You may guess what my feelings were when
l realized what an awful blunder had been
made, and for ten minutes | lost the power
of speech entirely. was a trusted man, but
there was 100000 gone and the doors OF
state prison yawned for me-. When shook
myself together made tracks for the Wen
dell house, and III be hanged il the first man
| ran across wasn't German who was tax.
ing on at great rate because somebody had
changed satches with him. | was the one,
of course, and the way he went for me was a
caution. He had dress suit in the satchel !,
and was to attend wedding that evening,
had to treat him to four beers before he
would calm down, and as we made the ex,,
change he waved his arms about and
shouted:
"Mein Gott, my friend, but if ! don't get
mein satchel back vhas damaged more ash
feefteen dollars in my feelings =,
'He did not know the contents OF mine,
laughed the messenger, "or it might not have
been so easy to effect an exchange. CHI
cago Evening News.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
LnISe on the Mninr.

The major, just returned from Boston,
tells in strict confidence this story:
Il had engaged my berth, and was stand
ing on the rear platform five minutes be-
fore the train pulled out OF the Park
Square depot, when a midde.aged woman
and handsome girl, both ladies', passed me
and entered the car, accompanied by a
gentlemanly-looking chap who carried their
baggage. A moment later this fellow pushed
up to me and said he was in a most embar-
RAISING position, had his sister and mother
aboard, and had lost his mileage book He
would introduce me TO them and give me
anysecurity for S25. said needed neither
introduction nor security, but would give
him ten dollars-all had to spare. He in
sisted on giving me his diamond scarfpin,
and then rushed into the station to see il
he could get more cash. As the train pulled
out without him, he came running wildly
after 1t, but had to give it up.
"Then the porter approached me tenta-
lively. Was that man annoying your he
said told him no. He insisted on carrying
the baggage Of two ladies inside, sab, an '-
an'-dd he get any money out Of youg
"'Of course he didn't, said l. but took
the first opportunity Of examining that pin.
It was worth about five cents."-Buffalo
News
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
EMpREss ELlzAaErn.s FuN.
An Occasion When she Kept the Fos-
sIlized Professors Roaring with
l,au0htar.

An occasion Wneb Sne Aopt tMo EOA~
sIlized Professors Roaring with
Laughter.
Among many interesting anecdotes
circulated in Vienna society about the
late Empress Elizabeth is a rather
amusing adventure which occurred
during visit to Ireland. The empress
was devoted to the chase, particularly
fox hunting. The day prior to her re-
turn home, longing for a farewell dash,
she STARTED for few hours sport In
the vicinity of Maynooth college. She
was having extraordinary luck, and the
largest fox she had ever followed was
likely to be soon tracked down, when
the willy creature turned abruptly and
darted off in bee-line for the college.
The bell had just sounded the recrea-
ton hour, and a minute later the as
sembled students were surprised to see
fox clear the low stone wall OF the
playground, and the next instant
pretty young woman dashing among
them in the same unceremonious fash
ion. While the servants easily dis
posed of the fox the empress dismount-
ed and asked her circle Of youthfua.
admirers to direct her TO their college
president, at that time DIR. William j.
Walsh, now archbishop of Dublin.
Upon the doctors appearance, En-
press Elizabeth revealed her identity,
told what brought her no the college
and asked that she might be shown to q
room, as in crossing pond the bottom
of her floating blue velvet habit had
dipped into the water and the cold,
clinging garment was far from COM
Portable. A blazing fire being built in
the college guest chamber, she pro-
ceeded to dry her clothes, which she
discovered were so drenched as to in
yolve several hours imprisonment.
In the meantime what was she to.
wear? She would borrow one OF DR..
Walsh's gowns. So while her amazon
was steaming before the fire the SOW
ereign gayly wrapped herself in the
ecclesiastic robes and invited the Presi-
dent and principal professors to share
q friendly cup of tea with her, and, as
DR.. Walsh often tells his friends, it
was the merriest cup ever drunk in
that college, for Elizabeth had quite
entered into the spirit of her inn
promptu party and kept the fossilized
professors roaring with laughter by her
numerous anecdotes and rare sallies
of wit. The amazon dried, she dis
missed her guests, dressed and depart
ed, having given the students and fac
ulty of Maynooth college a topic OF
conversation for weeks to come.-N. o.
| Times-Democrat.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

crouching in corner, a white-faced
creature with walling eyes and dis
heveled hair.
"Who is it?" came from his lips in a
rasping whisper.
Friends" said Hendricks.
Gielow tried to rise, but fell back
ward.
IN Gods name-water!" he gasped.
Here, drink this first" said Lampkin,
kneeling and drawing out from his
pocket a flask of brandy. Gielow tried
TO take the bottle in his hands, but his
fingers were too stiff from cold. DR..
Lampkin placed the bottle to his lips,
and Gielow drank.
"Oh, thank God!" he said. "Is it true,
are you fricnds?"
This is Mr.. Minard Hendricks" an
swered Lampkin. with glance at the
holder of the lantern, land Miss Hunt
ington is outside in carriage waiting
to take you home"
"Oh, no, really?" cried the prisoner,
and then he lowered his head to his
knees and laughed like happy cEild.
at seems like years since came here
He tried again to rise, but Lampkin
stopped him.
"You must first drink some of this
liquid food" he said.
As he opened the bottle, Glelow eyed
it like famished beast. AS he was
taking 1t from spoon from the doc.
tors hands, Hendricks peered out
through the crack.
81 have the solution now," he re
marked. "In cutting the new road
along here, they came within a few
feet of chopping the end off this cav
ern. The blasting caused the crack
He must have thrust his message
through il"
Gielow nodded as he ate, but he madt
no comment.
"Now, that is enough for the pres
ent," said Lampkin. "We must get yol
out of here and warm you up before W.
do anything else"
They raised the artist to his feet, ant
bore him slowly between them alons
the dark passage, and up the darl
stairs to the hall above.
"We'll take him straight to Kola'
room and wrap him up" said tn
doctor.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
CHAPTER XX.-CoNT1NuEp.

"Good, good!" approved Hendricks
as Kola's body began to grow limp
'Give him some more!"
"Oh, no, he must not be too deeply
under it," objected Lamplun. He is
Just right now. Let him loose. III man.
age him as easily as a rowboat down
stream. Now, if he will only talk"
Kola's face was bloodless. For mo-
ment there was no sound inside or out
side of the house. Lampkin raised the
towel a little, for the lips of the lndiar
were moving.
A harsh laugh broke from the death
like face.
"Its the wisdom of the cast,
chrckled Kola. IN never be suspect
ed, and when Hendricks is out of the
way, shall,be free, Yes, free, and rich,
and as powerful as king"
There he paused. LamplEn held VI
his hand to warn the others not tc
speak, and in a distinct voice said:
"But Gfelow-will be be found?"
"Never!' burst impulsiyely from
Kola's lips. mo enc else knows the Sc
cret door. No one would think of the
head of the dragon"
The eyes of Hendricks and the doctor
met. Hendricks flashed knowingly
and he grunted as he turned ard ran
into the hall. A moment later Lamp
kin followed, finding the detective eX'
ainining the walnut dragon at the foot
of the stairs.
81 believe on my life that the head oi
the thing unscrews," Hendricks ex
claimed, excit0dly. "See where it has
been rubbed by use. BY Jove, l have
it'll"
Grasping the head in his hands, Hen
bricks gave it a powerful wrench, and il
began to turn. In moment it came
off, aad they saw, protruding from a
hollow tube in the neck of the dragon
a steel rod with ring on its end. Hen
bricks tried to push the rod downward
but it resisted his efforts. Then, as
cending the steps till he was above the
ring, he pulled it steadily upward. A
little bell inside the dragon rang. This
was followed by a crealiing sound un'
der the hall floor, and tall gilt-framed
plate-glass mirror in the brick wal
near by leaned. outward on one side
Running TO ii, Lampkin pulled it out
aud fousd that it turned on hidden
hinges. And behind the mirror was re-
vealed n doorway and narrow flight
of stairs leading downward into the
darkness. There was a lantern on the
first step, and Hendricks lighted it, and
holding it above his head he hurried
down the stairs At first the steps were
of wood, but deeper down they were ol
unhewn stone.
Perhaps 40 feet from the surface Of
the earth, they found themselves in &
long, narrow cavern, which wound
.abount like serpent's trail. And when
they hid gone perhaps 200 yards from
their starting point they found them
sselves stopped by brick wall in which
was a rusty iron door. The door was
locked. but bunch Of keys hung on a
hook near by.
I'VE have found him." said Lamplcin
Hendricks nodded as he began to try
the keys in the lock. After many fail
ures, the door was finally opened, and,
iu the combined light Of the lantern
and streak Of daylight that came in
at tiny crack In the rock, they saw,
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

tinni. You Actually do so many good
deeds that you forget about them. You,
of course, remember telling US about
the head of the dragon, the lantern,
the stone stairs. the long cavern, and
the cell at the end"
Kola's face darkened. He reflected
a moment and then said:
81 see you made me talk unconscious
ly. 1 acknowledge that you have un-
done me completely"
He sat up and his handouts clanked
as he folded his hands over his knee.
rs Gielow alive?" he questioned.
Thanks, yes;" saidsHendricks.
"Well, am glad of that, anyway. He
stood between me and my desire, that's
all had against him."
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
Appropriately charENd.

"That was funny thing that hap
pened out in Ohio the other day." said
the man with the saffron whiskers and
twinkle in his left eye.
The undertaken looked grave and
asked in sepulchral tones:
"What was that?"
"An epidemic of typhoid fever was
traced to the ice people used"
THAT was not unusual"
sand they arrested the iceman for
carrying congealed deadly weapons."--
Town Topics.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
when a vaae Is a varse.

FIFTY cents for this beautiful little vase, y
called the auctioneer; going, going for so.
Do | hear 65 for this beautiful little vase"
and no one thought anything about the
auctioneer or the vase which went for 80
cents until another one was put up, an i'm
mense affair of cloisonne. Nov we will
show you an exquisite piece, not to be du-
plicated in this country" he went on. "An
exquisite cloisonne vaFse-" and there the
Wellesley girl said excitedly to her com.
panon: Now, that is what | call true
Boston culture. Would you expect man
Of that kind to make such delicate dis
tinction? He must have been educated at
a woman's college. When he is selling a
5O.cent article he says vase in the ordi.
nary way, with the long sound of a, but
when he comes to a big piece of cloisonne,
it is varse, with the broad "a every time.
That is according to rule. Over ten dol
lars in price you find varse, but under
that nothing but an ordinary, everyday
vase. IN. Y. Times.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Each sprIng the ma

Each spring the married man will calm him
down
And move about as quiet as a mouse;
Naught will he do to tempt his wife to
frown,
Lest she should say it's time to clean the
house.
Judge
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Michael MacDonagh's Irish Life
and Character" contains some good
"bulls," of which the best is this:
A lady one day heard a servant knock
at the door, and afterward asked the
servant who had called.
''It was "A gintleman, ma'am, looking
for the wrong house." replied Mary.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Foreigner-Why is it that so many
American cities are complaining of bad
water? Is not the water supply under
the direction of city officials?
American-Usually.
Foreigner-And are not those officials
elected by the people?
American-Yes.
Foreigner-Then it appears to me
you have not been careful to select Off
cials who are good judges of water.
N. Y. Weekly.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Frick-Did old Bender sell his car
riage and take to riding in the street
cars so as TO save expenses?
Burns-Well, / guess notl He want
ed to set his neighbors good example;
you know he owns the trolley road
now.-Brooklyn Life.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

"What's the matter?" asked the
friend. You're not angry because that
man accused you of being the political
boss of this town"
"That isn't what he said" replied the
indignant citizen. HE intimated that
l wasn't the boss."-Washington Star.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

An Atchison girl clerk demanded raise
Of wages this morning. She said that she
had been eating brain food cereals for a
month past, and felt that if they were as
beneficial as the testimonials on the wrap
pers declared, her ability was now such as to
demand due recognition.-Atehison Globe.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Bates-That nephew of yours called
me blackguard.
Yates-Just like Ben; no tact about
the boy. I've always told him that the
truth was not 10 be spoken on all oc-
casions.-Boston Transcript.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
The Curse of War.

Mrs. Henpeck Visiting her first hus-
bands grave)--Yes; here lies hero
You would not be my husband to-day
had he not been killed in the war.
Mr.. Henpeck (fiercely)-Yes; what a
curse war is.-Tit-Bits.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

$50, you see, there are several things
that would interest you, and I'm sure
you would enjoy yourself very much.
Now, can't | persuade you to come
to our next mothers meeting?
"Well, yer leddyshif, you're kind;
but meyer was society woman!"-
Punch.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Beloved" he cried, throwing himself
at his wife's feet, "we have lost all save
honorl"
The woman pressed her hand to her
streaming eyes and wept as if her heart
were breaking.
"How awkwardl" she sobbed. Just
the thing we don't need if we've got to
deadbeat!"
Verify, it seemed that relentless
fate pursued them.-Detroit Journal.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

"Louise, / could hardly sit through
the sermon"
"Sleepy, Arthur"
"No; but your hat looked so much
like a spring salad that it made me
hungry."-Chicago Record.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

"Ma, I'm at the head of my class"
"How's that, Dick?"
"Teacher says I'm the worst of all
the bad boys in school. IN. Y. Even
ing World.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Julia O'Stubs-Yer tells me OBJ yer
lobe and wants me ter be yer very own.
Is yer income big enough ter buy me
dat dream of hat and de dresses ter
match it. If it is, Mortimer Irving
Stages, Use yourn to the end.-N. y.
World
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
The Girl behind the Fan.

We have talked about the prowess
OF the man behind the gun;
We have told in song and story
How he made the Arabs run;
But the highest pitch Of glory
For this brave. intrepid man
Is attained in boasting Of 1t
To the girl behind the fan.
The Rival.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
Rend NeMsnnner..

Minister (sternly)-Do you know
what becomes of boys who tell lies and
steal?
The Urchin-Yep; when they gets to
be men they become politicians.-N. y.
World.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

The menu of love consists chiefly of i'm
probable possibilities.-Chicago Daily News
No Credit-Bramble-"You complain oi
being poor, but look at me. am 5000 il
debt" Thorne-"That's jVst what | an
kicking about. can't get into debt"-N
Y. journal.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Mrs. Skimpen-I think Mr.. Smith
must have liked the beefsteak pie. He
had two helpings of it.
The Tactless Boarder-Possibly he
did it on a wager-Boston Transcript.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
why They Sigh.

The men who sigh for good old times,
Are those who do not know
How stupidity the world was run
An age or two ago
Chicago Daily News.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

,atrice - Isn't that sad about our

Patrice - Isn't that sad about our
,at?
Patience-What's that?
"Why, the poor thing was drowned"
"An accident, SUPPOSE"
"Of course; you never heard OF cat
being drowned any other way, did
?"-Yonkers Statesman.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Jane keeps little lamp alight,
Within closet-day and night.
'Tis not Loves shrine-no-droll device
She fancies 1t will scare off mice.
Chicago Daily News.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

There's no old age;
We mount life's ladder rung by rung;
At twenty-five
We're old-at sixty we are young.
Judge
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

81 am told that Squallinger has be-
come a Christian"
81 don't believe it. saw him throw q
banana skin on the sidewalk the other
day."-Boston Journal.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Japly-'1 wouldn't mind getting drunl
occasionally but for one thing" Yaply'-
"What is that?' Japly.-"lt always givel
me the courage to call on the very people
that don't want to have see me in thai
condition. Town Topics.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

"0h, Harry, listen to this: In Sberi
they chain convicts to their wheelbarrows.
"'Well, Harriet, you know very well you'
chain me to the lawn mower if you weren'
afraid the neighbors would blow about it.
Chicago Daily Record.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

LADY, wish to get birthday present
for my husband.
Shopwalker-Ho long have you been
married, madam?
"Ten years" g,
Bargain counter to the right, madam.
Rival
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

"Three is a crowd" and they were three
The parlor lamp, the maid and he;
But two is company" no doubt
That's why the knowing lamp went out.
Il. A w Bulletin.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Shea doctor in Berlin, after a great
deal of study, has discovered that married
men live longer than bachelors" He Tim.
ploringly)-"Save my lfe!" She (oyously)
-"0h, Clarence, how did ySu guess that
| loved youy-Oho State Journl
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Husband is no hurry, dear
I've just telephoned, and they say on.
train is four hours late.
Wife-Good!' I've just got time to fl,
my hair over again.-Town Topics.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
arent DinnnpoIntment.

He-My wife's taste is for every
thing rich.
She-She must have been awfully dis
appointed in you, then. = YonkerH
Statesman.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

A sparkling device seems to be a necessary
part Of the motor carriage. The old-fash
ioned horse that could be driven with one
hand, and a covered buggy, were considered
a good sparkling device in those days.
L. A. w. Bulletin.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

"Did that man to whom you were
just talking say your affairs were mis-
managed?" asked Mr.. Meekton's wife,
severely.
snow, Henrietta, that was simply a
little aside; it wasn't intended for your
ears at all"
II insist"
"Oh, well, if you insist; he didn't say
my affairs were mismanaged. He said
they were Mrs.-mAnaged. Washing
ton Star.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
A Boomerang.

"He laughed madly when she broke
a plate over his head"
Suddenly deranged?"
"No; it was plate she had painted
herself. &C Chicago Record.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
Too Much Ovation.

The whistling bullets fierce refrain
Could not make him afraid;
But when he got back home again
His nerves broke down beneath the strain
When all the brass bands played.
washington Star.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24
quite Certain.

| The newest fashions now are In,
And, from the way 1t looks,
Though coats and has may change,
there'll be
No change in pocketbooks.
IN, Y World.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Horrible Death.-"Poor Siddons! His
dead body was found on the banks of the
Sehnylkill yesterday" Drown himself?'
"The suppositon is that he drank some
Of ."-Philadephia Gall.
The Wellington enterprise. [volume] (Wellington, Ohio) 1899-1900, 1899-05-24

Easily Dstinguishabe-"Well, | ought
to know my own mind" Certainly! You
try hard to have it different from anybody's
else!"-Detroit journal.