Evening journal., 1899-07-28

NEol lONs DJl hEhIt ID MI II
ING PUT IN THEM TO LULL YOU
TO SLEEP.
REAL ESTATE AND RATTERS.
Recently young real estate man
and future lawyer were meandering
up Market street The word meander-
ing is used because it is the only word
that describes their peculiar style oil
ambulation. From the general cut Of
their exaltation the Wayfarer sup
poses they had just been eating voc
amin" or something else 10 put one in
a Celestial state of mind. 1t was plain
that just then they owned Market
street-if not the whole town. Near
Sixth and Market streets they paused
for mutual admiration, and, as they
were leaning against each other. sup
posedly for mutual support. Al this
blissful moment. when not feather
had been allowed to moult from the
wing of friendship (begging Mr.. swiv-
eller's pardon). an Ethiopian hove in
sight, followed by a very large. very
lean, very ugly dog. yellow in color
and belonging to the genus cur To
the Midsummer Nights Dream OF the
real estater the dog was a beautiful
black-and-tan ratter. and. Of all
things. such beast was what he just
then wanted So he called to the sable
owner OF the canine:
Say. thish your dog?"
Yes. sub. dats him; dats a beauty.
sub"
And he is beauty. sure" said the
real estate owner want TO sell
him?"
Wen. sub, no suh--not ezackly.
suh.g
Give you a dollar"
NO, suh."
Give sou five"
mo, sub"
Say. pard. l must have him. He's
the best. finest ratter ever saw. Give
you ten"
NO, ssh."
Give you thirty" =.
no sub"
"Give you nifty dollars
About this time tender spot was
tonched in the Ethiopian bosom. With
the look popuiarly supposed to have
been on the face Of the Arab sheik
when he declaimed in the desert
MY beautiful my beautiful,
That standest meekly by" etc,
he said. between tears OF loving part
ing and smiles Of expected Hhekels:
Well. sub. reckon xouse got to
have i'm. l CANT stan yo' pleadin'
that-a-way."
The prospective purchaser steadied
himself against the telegraph pole and
began sort OF vacation ramble
through his pockets. But the coin was
on a vacation, too.
With all the solemnity be1tting such
solemn business transaction, he said
TO the budding legal spirit;
Dlils ltMU iHt "a lAllit tHunbc+
The prospective sale had attracted
quite q good sized crowd which sympa-
thetically watched the legal embryo
making q still hunt for cash in his
clothes. After a thorough overhauling
OF all the pockets OF both the sum OF
exactly forty-nine cents--counting Al
It's face value a plugged dime-was
produced The real estate counted Il
very wisely and carefully several times
and said:
"Pard, I'm a little short-money's IN
mother clothes seer You guarante,
the dog to be good ratter and wei
take him along ana you can come
rosnd Monday and collect, see?"
The face Of the Ethiopian was a study
as he said
Yes, sub. I see-In ust bring d.
dog round Monday. an collect"
The Ethiopian resumed his iourne,
coastward, saying:
"You cain't list tell what's in
whip mans pocket by de way h
spresses hisself. Guess III cit hom
sobah. anyway. and dat'll save som
trouble"
About forty dogs have been since Of
fered the real estater. bus aome va
none Of them seemed to suit him. and h
sits 70 this day at his Office near Mint
and Market dogless and unsatisfe'
But it's getting to be a little war;
around there when anyone mention
selling him q rstter.
REAR ADMIRAL. OR COLONEL.
Union Republicans do not take kline
ly to the action OF President McKinle
in changing the name 0: Fort Dell
ware to Fort DUPONT. in honor OF Rel
Admiral DUPONT They take it mo