davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Benefit of Peerage.

Every one may not know what the term "benelit of peerage" implies. A peer can demand private audience of the sovereign to represent his views on matters of public welfare. For treason or felony he can demand to be tried by his peers. He cannot be outlawed in any civil action, nor can he be arrested un. less for an indictable offense, and he is exempt from serving on juries. He may sit with his hat on in courts of justice, and should he be liable to the last pen alty of the law he can demand sflken cord instead of hempen rope
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
A Clever WIfnesn.

In 8 recent county court case in which . man sued another for balance of wages the defendant called witness.
 Witness-I beg pardon, your honor. Before give my evidence l want my expenses.
 Judge (to defendant)-Pay him 7s. Cd.
 The defendant having done so, the judge said, 'Now that you have had your expenses, what do you know Of the oase?"
 Witness-Nothinga at all, your honor. London Tit Bits.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
rRv .IIEs.s FooT-EAsE

A powder to be shaken in the shoes. At this season of the year your feet feel swollen. nervous and uncomfortable. IT you have smarting feet or tight shoes, try Aliens FoOt-Ease. It rests and comforts {; makes walking easy. Cures swollen and sweating feet, blisters and callous spots. :. Re lieyes cOrns and buniOns of all paiE and is acertain cure for Chilblains, Sweating ,,damp or frosted feet. We have over thirty thous- and testimonials. Try it today. Sold by all druggists and shoe stores for 25c. Trial package FREE. Address, Allen $. Olm- sted. Ie Roy. x. |.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
George Was Stubborn.

George almost broke my heart Sun- day"
 How soT'
 'I begged him to go to church with me in his uniform and he wouldn't do it."
 How mean! What reason did he give?"
 He said 1t would have to be disin- fected first"
 How perfectly selfish. Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Remarkable Coincidence.

Somehow I'm awfully stupid to- night" remarked young Borum, Ian guidly, the other evening.
 Indeed you are," retorted Miss Cut ting, somewhat impulsively.
 Do you really mean thatT asked the young man in surprise.
 'I merely indorsed your remarks; didn't you just now assert that you were stupid?" she queried.
 'Yes," he responded, 'but only said so without thinking"
 And up to the time you spoke of 1t, she replied, 'T only thought so with out saying it''
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

The California Fruit Grower says that Winters man has been experi- menting with fig curing, and comes to the conclusion that the figs picked from the trees at full stage of ripe ness, instead of being allowed to fall to the ground, make the best dried product. This is quite probable. It is not generally expected by experienced horticulturists that fruit of any kind, which is allowed to drop from the tree. will make a first-class dried product.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
HOW,s THISP

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward for any case of catarrh that cannot be dured by Halls Catarrh Cure.
 F. J. CHENEY & CO, Props, Toledo, O. We, the undersigned, have known F. J. Cheney for the last IT. years, and believe him perfectly honorable in all business transactions and financially able tO carry out any obligation made by their firm.
 WEST X TRuAx, Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, O. wALDING KINEAN & MARVIN, Wholesale Drug gists, Toledo, O.
 Nails Cata:fh Cure is taken internally, act ing directly upon the blood and mucous sur faces of the system. Price, Zoe. per bottle Sold l,y all druggists. Testimonials free.
 Halls Family Pills are the best.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
some sharp sayings of BIsmarcIs.


 Bismarck had the frankness to say that he looked upon the comedies of Dumas the younger. and indeed on most French plays of the lighter sort. as grossly corrupting to the public mor- als. "Panem ct circenses, smiled De Morny. "Panem ct saturnalia," nut tered Bismarck.
 "Prince Bismarck is respectfully re- quested, wrote the American, ito ca ble a few words in reference to the fol- lowing question: What benefit will be derived in your grace's opinion from in- ternational expcsitions?"
 On the margin of this the prince sim ply wrote in pencil, "None. "-"B Bis marck's Table Talk. 1" by c. Lowe
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Foundation of a Theory.

Watts-I see that German scientist asserts that the memory is stronger in summer than in winter.
 POtts-I guess he wrote that after hearing some old fellow talking about the hot summers of forty years ago. Indianapolis Journal
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
George IV'm Wifi.

Mrs. Byrne, in her Social Hours With Celebrities, tells this anecdote of George IV's wit: ''I remember one of the Rev. Mr. Wagner's stories con- cerned some nobleman who had enjoyed an unenviable reputation for assininity. It had been suggested to the king to confer on him an order of the Thistle which had become vacant. Give the Thistle to - exclaimed the king Why. he'd eat itl' '
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

We pay $1OO if We cannot prove that we can save you MONEY on everything you buy, We are saving the people of the Pacific Coast thousands of dollars every month. For full particulars, address, Gil bert Clements Sons, 218 California St. San Francisco, Cal, Wholesale and Retailers of family Supplies
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
She EXnIaina.

He-Why do women always carry their purses in their hands?
 She-Oh, don't you know? What would be the use having q nice lace handkerchief if one couldn't let the ends hang through her purse so that people might see them?
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

rRAINs TO RUN sLowER

Railroad officials claim that it is very ex- pensiye to run their express trains, and are talking about reducing the speed. It's like wise expensive to the health to struggle and compete in business affairs as men do now adaSs. The whole system gives out. For restoring strength Hostetter's Stomach Bit ters IS the proper remedy.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
That Disastroua Crook.

Miss Sympathy-Oh, feel so sorry Mir. Carryon has met with an accident. MT. S.--That so? What is it?
 Miss S.-I heard some one say that his elbow has taken such a crook that he has lost his work on account of it, Boston Courier.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

We trust that the czar has observed that President Mckinley is right in line with him on the disarmament proposition. The President approved the plan, and then, in his message, ad- vocated an increase in our military forces.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
There is no Telling.

Be sure not to let Rheumatism stay in the system longer than you can get bottle of St. Jacobs Oil to cure it
 There is no telling what part it may striko or how much misery it may give.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
once Too orten.

Whats all this excitement aboutf' Nothing worth mentioning. Man got knocked down."
 "Accident?"
 Mot exactly. One of these men who always catch hold of you and push you out of their way when you happen to meet them at a crowded corner grabbed the wrong man just now. That's all. !"
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Knew What He Required.

Diggs-Good gracious. Riggs; why don't you turn off the steam? Your of flee is as hot as an oven.
 Biggs-Well, isn't that as it should be? This, you know. Is where I make my family's daily bread.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
The Morning Meal.

"Now, children" said the teacher, "what do you call the meal that you eat in the morning?"
 Oatmeal. promptly responded number of the class. What to Eat.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

When coming to San Francisco go to Brooklyn Hotel, 2O8-2l2 Bush Street. Am erican or European plan. Room and board $1.OO to $1.50 per day; rooms 50 cents to $I.00 per day; single meals 9 cents. Free coach. Chas. Montgomery.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

If, as the brewers say, the war tax has diminished the amount of beer consumed to the extent of 20 per cent, there is no reason to be seriously alarmed about the effect on the con- gumerS
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Two of a Kind.

Husband tat the breakfast table)e "Oh, for some of the biscuits my mother used to makep
 Wife (sweetly)-Pm sorry you have n't got them, dear. They would be just about stale enough by this time to go well with that remark.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
strong as a Steel Ramrod.

If you want to feel your spine Is a pipe-stem ready to snap, just get Lum- bago. If you want to feel as strong as a steel ramrod, use St. Jacobs Oil; it has magic.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Makes ths Muscles Strong.

Fropl hard work or excessive exer else soreness and stiffness sets in and lays up St. Jacobs Oil will cure it, after few applications and make the muscles Timber and strong.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
OUR BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND DO.
 INGS HERE AND THERE.

Jokes and Joke1ets that Are Supposed to Have Been Recently Born-Sayings and Doings that Are odd. Curious and
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
How They Get On.

Ma You say Mir. Little has 2 d. fly o, -en and he gets only SIP week :! How on earth does he get along?
 Jennie-Oh, every Little helpsLPhil- adelphia Record.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
{ tranCe.

ShortsOn-ShysOn, until now I have never felt obliged to ask for a loan
 Shyson-And, strange to say, Short son, until now have never felt obliged to refuse you.-Judy.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Jealous of Himself.

"Is he really so jealous? "Why, he some one told him matrimony had made another man of im."-Cincin- natl Enquirer.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

The psaltery of Spain is supposed to have been introduced into that country by the Moors It is still in common use among the peasants.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

No household is complete without bottle of the famous Jesse Moore Whiskey. It is pure and wholesome stimulant receommened by all physicians. Don't neglect this necessity.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Her Dearest Friend.

Maude- Funny what curious eyes some people have! l showed my new photograph to the Nellisons to-day. He said 1t was awfully pretty and she said it didn't look bit like me.
 Edith-So it seems that husband and wife can think alike, doesn't it?-Bos- ton Transcript.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

Teacher-NOw, Johnny, what does g-t-i-n-g-y spell?
 Johnny Bright-Do you refer to the business end of a wasp, or the prin- ciple of my dad when I ask for a new pair of skates?
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

ETC Permanently CnreI. No Its or nervous tiiS ness after first days use of Dr. Khne's Great Nerve Restorer, Send for FREE S2. .OO trial bottle and treatise. DR. R. II. KLINE, Ltd. p30 Arch St., Philadelphia. Pa.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
HOITT,s sCHoor. EoR Rovs

Now at Burlingame will remove to it's beau tiful new home at Menlo Park, San Mateo Co.,, Cal, and reopen January 18th, 1898. Address, Ira G. Heitt Ph. D.. Menlo Park, Cal
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Benefit of Golf.

"Tm surprised to hear that you're so enthusiastic over golf, Sligher. Do you play"
 Not in a thousand years. Wouldn't know link from a ballroom. But my wife Is so completely taken up with. the game that she has quit trying to run me"-Detroit Free Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

If women were as crazy after the men as some allege, they would not work so hard to go to heaven, where they know there will not be any.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
He Respected Her Will

Flossette in mourning! Who is it?
 Bertie-Beasly shame-aw-maiden aunts dawg-aw-departed-aw-she insists on my showing respect, don't cherk now!--St Paurs.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

Il don't know" answered Senator Sorghum. ''It ain't accurate, anyhow. It was in politics that I made my money. Star.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

About the time a man gets a large family of daughters of his hands he has to begin setting hLs sons-in-law on their feet.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Cruel Girl,

Clarence-I don't know what's the matter with me. I feel like fool to- night.
 Myrtle-NOw l know he was wrong. Clarence-Who was wrong?
 Myrtle-The man that said looks are deceiving.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
HorticuIture nt Home

Expectant Father-Well. is it lit tie peach?
 Excited Nurse-Ho, sir. It's little pair. .-Yonkers Statesman
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
SDoiIed Darfiur.

"What are you crying about now, dearie?" asked the fond mother. els there something mammals sweetest wants"
 Yes"
 ''What is it?''
 T-I don't know. That's what I'm crying aboutw-Indianapoli Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
The PrnInOuA.

Smith-YOu are not superstitious. are you?
 JoneS-I should say not But why do you ask?
 Smith-Because I wanted you to lend me SIS until next week.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

Tobacco Was discovered in Santo Do mingo in l496, in Yucatan by the Spaniards in 1920. It was introduced into France in l5GO, and into England in 45S3.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
An Insinuation.

Hattie-You are looking rather pale of late. Why don't you do as do, take two-mile walk every morning for your complexion?
 Ena-And do you really do that? 1 had no idea 1t was that far to & drug store.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

The great trouble with the worlds idols Is that they are all more CT less cracked.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

shall recommend PisO's Cure for Con sumption far and wide.-Mrs. Mulligan, Plumstead, Kent, England, Nov. 8, 1895.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
To Cure a Cold In One Day.

Take Laxative Promo Qunine Tablets. All Druggists refund money if it fails to cure, 2jc.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
EXn1aiued.

Why" asked the youngest boarder, do they measure the speed of ship in knots?'
 ''I think" said the Cheerful Idiot, ''that 1t has something to do with the tied. ."-Indianapolis Journal
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Mun;cipaI JeuIousie..

New Yorker-You are a stranger here, l presume?
 Chicago Man (haughtily)-I am from the great city that New York is jealous
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Refutltion.

What does that man mean by say ing you made all your money out of politicS% exclaimed the indignant
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14

New Yorker-Ahl And how are things in dear old Lunnon!-New York Waoklv
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
He Didn't Like a Crowd.

Mrs. GotrOx-Mabel, dear, arc you sure MT. Woodby loves you for your self alone?
 Mabel-Yes, Pm sure he does, man. ma. He Is always so restless whep you are in the room.
The St. Johns herald., 1899-01-14
Iiu,s Wicked Des;re.

Little Jim is crazy to have school begin"
 ''Is he so fond of study?"
 No; but he says he wants to see how much his teacher knows about the new geography. y."-Detroit Free ~xess.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-06-08
SPORTS AND
SPORTSMEN.
Franklin Baseball Club De-
7 feated the Hudson Base
ball Club Yesterday.
NEWS OF The WHEELMEN
Intercollegiate Regatta--Local
Sports at the Eighteen
eral Notes.

The Hudson Baseball Club suffered de-
Club yesterday in a good game on the
Washington street grounds. The Frank
Inns won through their heavy stick work.
In this feature alone did they surpass
the Hudons. The latter played the best
game in the field. The game was a most
exciting one all the way through. Inc
Hudons were defeated in the last in
ming.
When the game opened the Hudsons
went to the bat frt and hit Smith four
times. They earned two runs> in this in
ming. The Franklin went to the bat and
they scored twice. In the second Sn,tn
took on D. more puzzling feature in MS
delivery and the Hudson could not find
him. They were retired in one, two, e,iree
style here, a they were also treated in
the third. In these two innings the
Franklins kept busy enough to score two
runs in each Two were added on by
the Hudsons in the fourth and one each
in the fifth and sixth. After the third
inning the Franklins were unable to
score until the sixth, when they got one,
n We're then held off until the last in
ming. In the seventh the Hudons got
two runs In and were feeling happy.
They failed in the last inning and the
Franklins went to the bat. Burke had
been working HARD up to this point and
here he weakened. The Franklins bat
ted him all over the field and never stop
ped until they had scored seven u n
The score.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-06-08
INTERCOLLEGIATE ROWING.
Annual Regatta to Be Held on the
Hudson Juno 26 and 27.

The Intercollegiate Rowing Association,
consisting of the Universities of Cornell,
Pennsylvania and Columbia, is the only
college rowing association in the United
States holding an annual regatta in which
the leading colleges in the United States
are invited to participate. The chief OBJ
ject of this association is to afford an
opportunity annually for rowing compe-
tition in order to demonstrate which Of
the university crews of the country is en-
titled to premier ono The annual re-
gatta of this association will be held on
the Observation-Disclosures course on the
Hudson River on June 26 and june II,
1899. There will be three events:-
The freshman ei~ght-oared race between
the Universities of Wisconsin, Columbia,
Cornell and Pennsylvania.
The four-oared race between the Uni
versities of Cornell and Pennsylvania; both
of which events will take place on June
IS.
The university ei~ght-oared race between
the Universities of Cornell, Pennsylvania.
Wisconsin and Columbia, which will take
place on June Y.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-06-08
NEWS or THE WHEELMEN.
inaugural Meet of the N. ]. r. A. to
Take Place Sunday at Newark.

Take Place Sunday at NeWarA.
The interest taken in the Sunday race
meets to be held at the V~ailsburgh board
track, Newark, is in the opinion OF the
promoters, the New Jersey Racing Asso-
| citation, something phenomenal. Letters
of inquiry and of cengratulatlon nave
poured into the association all the week
and the success of the venture Is ALREADY
assured. But few of the prominent pro-
fessional and amateur riders nave hesl-
tated about taking part in the sunday
meets. and the local interest thus far
manifested is highly gratifying to the
managers. At the inaugural meet to be
held next Sunday, June II, almost all the
crack professionals who will ride at Am
hnose park on Saturday, will take part.
The list includes the names of Maetar-
land, stevens Huffstetter, Kraemer, Hen
shaw, Hadfeld, Babcock, Maya, Sims
Goodman, Walthopr, kimble. Becker
Crooks. and a score of other profession
ais. while in the amateur events, IN Which
about fifty riders ave entered, such men
as Roome, Lake, Adametz, RUM, hunter
Firth. Ross, King and Ayers VIII appear
The meets will be conducted in the same
competent manner that has always char'
acterized the Newark meets.
John Weston, the well known Splinter
| of Hoboken, will ride in several meets this
season and his friends predict Tor MIN d
successful season, as he has attained con
siderable speed this season and is stronger
tina he was last year.
The Arcanum Wheelmen are making
several changes in their home. The mem
bership is growing at every meeting ano
there are plans forming for a picnic ano
an excursion.
The macadam roads on the south shore
of Long Island are in good shape to
Amityville. A path has been built and is
being improved from Amityville to Baby
lon. From Babylon through Bay Shore
to Islip the roads are in good condition.
Sidepaths and cycle paths good through
Oakdale, Sayville and Bayport to Patch
ogue.
The Defender Cyclers are working marc
on the final arrangements for their an
nual picnic which will be held on Satur-
day night at Pohlmann's Pavilion. The
affair is already an assured success as
the sale of tickets has been very large,
The committee in charge is greatly
pleased and promise that all past affairs
will be eclipsed. The various cycling
clubs throughout the county have re-
ceived cordial invitations to attend. The
floor manager will be genial Teddy
Muhlenbeck and Francis Kehoe will as
siSt him..
The Mantle Wheelnen will have 9
club run to Rockaway Sunday. The start
is to be made at $50 in the morning. This
point is a great favorite with the mem
bers and a. large GROVE is expected tc
turn out.
The North Hudson County Cyclers are
considering plans for a picnic. The road
officers are arranging a schedule of clut
runs for the season.
Captain Henry Miller of the Defender
Cyclers is paying strict attention to his
racing staff and is getting the cracks
rounded into good form as the season is
now on. 1t is said that the clubs colors
will be seen in almost all the meets here
abouts this season.
The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-06-08
LOCAL SPORTS AT THE FIGHT.
James Kelly Will Be Timer for
Fitzsimmons.

The observation-disclosures fight will draw
a large crowd from this city tomorrow
night. All the local sports have signified
their intention of seeing the mill.
James Kelly. manager of the Jersey City
Baseball Club, will be one of Fitzsimmon's
timers. Kelly knows that end Of the bust
ness all right, and will no doubt give en-
tire satisfaction.
The two principals have given UP work
and are now resting until they meet in
the ring when the greatest battle of the
century will take place provided there are
no accidents. Fitzsimmons knows all
about fighting and a veteran of the ring.
having met and DEBATED the best men in
the business. He counts much on his ex-
perienee and feels a sure winner.
Jeffries has raine hard for this mill
ard has a good chance with the cham
pion. 1t is probable hat the affair will
not last more han ten round as Fitzsim-
mons is out to win quick. He taxes no
chances and will put Jeffries to sleep in
the first round, if he can.