The record-union., 1899-05-07
THE TANNING OF POLGLAzE.
As Told BY the Sergeant.

do you remember Sergeant Polglaze,
Cornish?' said Sergeant Harding rem
iniscently Cornish said nothing. For
the Sergeant liked to tell his yarn, and
his elaborate leading up to his supJect
was never anything except a pretence
that his stories were drawn out of him,
rather than that they were, as was the
fact, if you touched the right tap,
poured out freely And, perhaps, the
tap did not matter very much FOR
as on this occasion, if no one rose to
the bait the tale came out just the
same.
When he lay at Shorncliffe," went on
the Sergeant, "Polglaze was Senior Ser
geant in a company. He was a hne
chap. 1 don't usually like these big
soldiers. They eat too much, they
can't march, they go over at the knees
and the only reasonable use to be made
of them is to lay them on the ground
in front of the shelter pits to stop the
bullets. And. considering the bullet
goes through forty-eight inches of clay,
they won't do for that with the Lee
Metford But Polglaze stood six-four,
f1lous fat on him. He was strong and
we'll made, all in proportion to his
hight. And when you get a man like
that he ought to make good shot,
| for he can hold the rifle by the upper
hand, and, with twenty-five solid stone
behind it, the rifle ought to be as steady
as if you put the buttplate, not against
mans shoulder, but against ST.
Michael's Mount. And, if there's wind
from the right, he has only to blow
along the side of the barrel second
before he holds his breath, and where's
your wind?
lone night l was one of the picket,
under Sergeant Polglaze, and we were
slowly pacing through Sandgate, when
We saw Pengelly, who was busily en-
gagged in tumbling into the gutter.
Pick n up said Polglaze, am We'll
take n back t. guardroom. Hocken
and I stopped to obey. but Pengelly
let out SO madly with his feet that we
drew back
The mans crazy drunk said Pol
glaze. Come, Pengelly, you'll only
make bad worse by carrying on these
way. A plain drunk is a thing which
must overtake the best-meanin' man
now an then. But dun't, by resistin'
the picket, turn n into a discredit to
'eeself an the D. c. L. T.
" Go t hell gurgled Pengelly.
All in good time. Come along.
dun't mind III cursin', eff cell only
come along quietly Be a good bwoy,
an dun't discredit the regiment before
all these Holy Bwoys' an 'Strawboots.
'Pengelly never said word, but lay
where he had fallen.
Try again t pick n up said Pol
glaze.
I'VE tried. He made my nose bleed
and knocked Hocken into the wall by
kicking him in the stomach.
Us We given n fair chance t. come
quietly said Polglaze. Us can't let
D. c. L. I. picket be laughin' stock t
other reg ments. Go an fall on n lone
an ALL an see eff zee can keep n
quiet
"Hocken and I had had enough The
others tried For two minutes the arms
and legs were flying wildly, and no one
knew what was happening At the
end of the two minutes, the picket held
off to get its breath. Pengelly was in
his old place in the gutter. Four of the
picket We're on their backs in the road
All the rest of them were holding one
part or other of them from their heads
to the ammunitions. where they had
been struck or kicked. They were all
Icursing Pengelly.
Give n frogs march, Sergeant,
said Trewent savagely.
dun't like dom that said Pol
glaze 'tO one Of O11r- oxrp Am l1a
tomorrow for givin' US so much trou-
ble'
An I'm sorry tonight IT'S well
'nough for you t. talk, Sergeant You've
not been savaged by n. like us have
dun't, said Polglaze, mind takin
my share of my knocks that be foin'
Therefore l will now take my turn with
you rankers.' He walked up alongside
Pengelly
Are zee comm quietly?'
"Pengellys only answer was to aim
a kick. Polglaze simply sat upon Pen.
gelly's chest
Now he said calmly, EFF zee bwoy:
will come an take hes arms an laigs
perhaps us'll get n back t. barracks
They held Pengelly firmly till Pol.
glaze got up. Then the kicking 5egar
over again
Fell never get n up to barracks,
said Trewent, unless zee do give 4
frogs march,
I'm afeared not said Polglaze. 'Ye,
l dun't like et'
'Pengelly let out with arms, legs and
teeth like raving mailman
Frogs march ~ said Polg!aze re-
luctantly
They frog s-marched Pengelly UP the
| hill to the guardroom. He struggled q
! good deal at first. but less and less as
time went on. The picket was congrat-
ulating itself on having taught him q
wcll-needed lesson
1 think we might let n walk a BIZ, .
said Polglaze. AS quiet now
| Think what ct meant t. get n Ser
| geant, said Trewent. Better keep n
| safe now us we got m
Perhaps you're right. But 1 dun t
| like these frogs march,
AS they got to the guardroom Pen
| gelly ceased to struggle at all. They
carried him in and laid him on one Of
the wooden beds. The Sergeant of the
guard vert to look at him, while Pol
glaze sat down and asked whether.
there O,.1 mr. q n