New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1899-01-07
TIE TALK or THE DAY.

one Of the New- England newspapers which OPP
poses expansion gives aid and comfort TO the enc
mics Of the United States by hoping that the spirit
OF Concord and Lexington will fire the hearts OF
Aguinaldos followers II they decide TO take up arms
against the United States. According to a literal
Interpretation OF the Constitution this is treason
Yet the paper in question is shouting every day for
a literal Interpretation OF the Constitution.
Dusty Roads-Tough old place that State Of
Weary wraggies-what yer givin us. Dusty
Dusty Roads,Water is the only lawful tpple
down there. and they've got city by the name OF
Bath.-(Boston Transcript.
An adjourned meeting Of the National Prison
Association OF the United States will be held In
New-Oreans. beginning on January 81.
Concatenation OF Catastrophe. Have you your
rubber oyershoes, MarmadukeT asked his wife
solicousy.
~ you haven't you are liable to slip down and
would be to say you were drunk and you
know how the neighbors Will talk Goodby, dear
All what an inspiration to n man is such help
meet.-(Detroit Journal
A ten-year-old boy In Cleveland reads great
deal. and his father delights in encouraging his
literary taste. Not long ago the father suggested
10 the boy that he should read up on the life and
death of Nathan Hale. the spy and hero OF the
Revolution. A few evenings later the father asked
the lad II he had carried out his request The boy
said he had. who was Nathan IIale?" the father
inquired.
'He was stringed mp by the British soldiers"
was the somewhat Irrelevant reply.
You should say hanged" said the father
"Strnged I'D is lust the same" said the boy
NO" said the father at isn't just the same"
We'll" said the boy, IT'S just the same 10
Nathan Hale"
This was something OF a poser, and the father
discrcetIy changed the subject.
And why did the British hang Nathan Hale?"
he asked.
because" replied the boy promptly. because
he ribbered for Central George Washington
This atrocious definition OF a spy's duties too
much for the father, and he promptly dropped the
Hale inquiry then and there.
Every town has liar or two; IA smart Aleck:
some pretty girls; more loafers than II needs a
town would be better OF without: men who stand
women. a who laughs an idiotic laugh every
time he says anything; scores or men with the
men who can tell you about how the war question
should be settled. the weather, and how to run
other peoples business. but who have made dis
NAL failure OF their own-(Northport News.
Il was recently making out deed for a man.
SAWS "A Detroit lawyer and all went swnmingy
tu | turned 10 him and asked hrs wife's name
oh yes OF course. Wife's name Very necessary
10 be sure and II plain to be seen that he
was sparring for time. while making every effort
10 bring his memory into play. lie had a rush OF
blood 10 ,he face looked sorely troubled and finally
turned his back me while he looked out OF the
window as though relief were TO be found there
.Wouldn't that beat you he exclaimed. he
turned slowly back. IN be blowed II can recall
her name You they used to call her Pet
when she was a girl at home. and that was her
mel me with me up 20 two years after our marriage.
when / began calling her Mamma" couldn't
tell Won her name II II were capital offence not
10 know IL Spose II wouldn't do to just call her
PET I'M the decd II wouldn't. he hurried
away and I'm an hour was back with his wifes fun
name on slip Of paper "-tDctroit Free Press.
What appears to be the matter with your
IN her? inquired the doctor. as he hastily put his
clothes
lies got the plumbago." replied the boy II
think that's what ma says II is.
Pain In the small OF the back presume" said
the doctor A.,
nav weighs 2i pounds "-(Chicago Tribune