The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1899-08-05
BRIGHT PARAGRAFS.
From the Pens Of Brother Editors
here and There.

wa '''t w NUN 4hllF'i = ava ~ tlN"i
Mecca postof1ire, in McMihn C0uu-
ty, is phenomlnal spring, the wat
ers IF which convert into stone all
kinds of substances which are pla-
ced in them. Many interesting and
unique fossils or petrifications have
teen taken from this curious spring
from time to time; among others,
petrified snake Notwithstanding
Democrat.
Here are some of the terrible
things which, according to a coun-
try exchange are likely to befall a
delinquent: "Last week delin-
quent subscriber said that he would
pay up Saturday il he lived. He's
dead. Another, T'll see you to-
morrow He's blind. Still anoth-
er one said, 4 hope to ray you this
week or go to the DEVIL He's
gone. There are hundreds who
ought to take warning by these
procrastinators and pay up their
subscriptions now.D-Jerry Simp-
sons BayOnet.
A preacher once said: "You edi-
tors dare not tell the truth. If you
ever did you could not live, your
newspapers would die" TO this
the editor replied: "You are right;
and the minister who will at all
time tell the bare truth about his
members, dead or alive, would not
occupy the pulpit more than one
Sunday, and he would find it neces-
sary to leave town in hurry. The
press and the pulpit go hand in
hand, with Whitewash brush and
kind words, magnifyiDg little vir-
tues into big ones. The pulpit,
press and gravestone are the great
saintmaking triumvirate." And
the great minister went away look
ing very thoughtful, while the poor
editor Turned to his Work,-Select-
ed.
Running local newsper is just
like running a hotel only differ
ent. When man goes into ho-
tel and finds something on the ta-
bic that he don't like, he does not
get up and kick all the fat in the
fire and tell the landlord to stop his
darned old hotel. He just pushes
that dish aside and Wades into
some other eatables. But it is diff
ferent with some newspaper read
ers. They find an item they don't
like and without stopping to think
that it may please whole lot OF
other people, make grand play OF
their asinity, and stop the paper
The paper don't stop, but that par
ticular gentleman's copy fails to
reach him the next week and he is
sure to sneak around and borrow
his neighbours copy, 'just to see il
it is still published" you know
The press still grindS on, however
and new subscribers line up in
place of tie dyspeptic who stopped
his source of information because q
small part Of tt did not suit him.
South Pittsburg Hustler.
The ninety dollar pate glass win.
dow in the front Of the Enterprise
office looks as though it had bee n
punctured by shell from one OF
Admiral Dewey's war ships-but il
has not. About seven O'Clock last
Friday evening a reader of this pa.
per entered this Office with the
avoWed intention of raising a row
and he accomplished what he un.
dert0ok, to the full letter of the law
1t need not be necessary to go into
details. He was grasped by the
seat of the pants, put through the
window head first and landed in
heap on the pavement. He is re-
operating in the hospital, where
he is receiving better treatment
than he deserves. OF course it is
costly but we have maintained oul
honor. The next delinquent sub
scribeT who preambulates into this
sanctum wanting to fight because
his wife's sickness was accidently
omitted, will go through the othel
window in like manner. a couple
of barn doors nailed together some.
what disfgures the front of thi!
block, but it will have 10 do unH
further collections.-Berea Enter
prise, Ohio.
Y Organizations are forming in Gu
, ba to secure American citizenship