The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1899-04-27
Sforyeffes.

A very subdued- looking boy of about
13 years, with long scratch on his nose
and an air of general detection, came to
his teacher in one of the Boston public
schools and banded her a note before
taking his seat and becoming deeply
absorbed in his book. The note read as
follows:
"Miss b: Please excuse James
for not being thare yesterday. He
played trooant, but | guess you don't
need to lick him for it, as the boy he
played trOoant with an him fell out,
an the boy licked him, an a man they
sassed caught them an licked him, an
the driver of sled they hung on to
licked him also. Then his pa licked
him, an | had to give him another one
for sassing me for telling his pa, so you
need not lick him until next time.
guess he thinks he better keep in school
hereafter Harper's Bazaar
OK
One of the most embarrassing things
the hrapne-shells. There is not so
much danger in their fire as in that of
modern musketry, but the sound of the
shrapnel is much more disconcerting
and demoralizing; its wild "whee-wew-
wew-wew" suggests missiles filling all
the air and coming from all directions.
A surgeon relates that, as he was stand
ing in front of hospltal-tent near
where two wounded colored troopers
were lying, he heard one of them say, as
a shrapnel wound past: 81 don't care
for dem Mauser bullets, for when you
hear one of 'em, you know it's done
gone past. But sho'ly would like to
know where de cannon is dat shoots
dem camp-kittles full O rOckSn'
a certain little man of six had been
all eagerness in anticipation of sum-
mer at the seashore. He could hardly
wait for the first bath. When, how
ever he saw the ocean, with the great
waves rolling on the beach, he could
not be induced to go near it, and
positively refuse to put on his bathing
suit of which he was so proud. So one
day his father offered him fifty cents if
he would put on his suit, and get wet
all over once. He wanted the money
very much, so he finally consented.
ClaSping his arms around his fathers
neck like vice, the great undertaking
had begun. After much shivoring and
trembling, he was wet about two inches
above his ankles, when he exclaimed:
*'Papa, -I-will-Only-
take-ten-cents-W this time"
Industrial School Gem.
The editor of the Oracle was alb
sorbed, when Junior, who often fur
nished poems for the paper, walked into
the room. The coming of the poet did
not disturb the editor, and he paid no
attention to the visitor. At last the
poet spoke.
'Good morning" was what he said.
"Oh, responded the editor, lis that
you? How are you? | am seeking
food for thought"
The Junior gave a hungry sigh, as
he laid down manuscript on the desk.
II don't think l can help you on that
line" he said, "but l can give you
thought for food"
And the editor took the poet to Brun-
del's and bought for him dozen dough
nuts and piece of mince pie.-The
Oracle (Iamlin, MIMI
oXo
One summer day while [ was sta
TtlOned in Steuben county, n. Y, near
the village of Bath, was sent for to 60
about half mile on urgent business"
Upon reaching the house designated
found, not death-bed scene or re-
pentant sinner, but smiling old man
of 20 or more, who informed me that he
wished "job DONE" He then intro
duced me to a lady perhaps a few years
younger than himself. 1 said: "Are
you ready?" eyes" he answered, seat
ing himself by the bride; ego on, elder"
/ then said: "Will you please stand?"
Re replied: 81 have usually sot" And
they 'sot."
CLEAN, N. Y. H. G. WOODS.
The keen-eyed stranger sided up to
The tall man who was hurriedly Snuff