The Portland daily press., 1899-12-22


have an Inexhs ustiole fund Of humor.
and they frequently interspsrse funny
anecdotes with their solemn deliberations
onos they are inside the sacred domain
of their private session cham ers, says the
Washington Star. Justice Brewer Is one
Of the most ipimitable story tellers among
them, and he told one the other day that
amused his colleagues immensely. Out
In Indiana, be said, there was justice Of
he peace who owned a farm. One line
Of his fence formed the boundary Of the
States of Indiana and Oaio. Like others
In rural districts who hold that Office he
had an abnormal appreciation of the re-
sponsibility of the Office and never lost an
opportunity to exercls, his prerogative OF
dema rding that the peace be preserved.
One day his son and his hired man got to
fighting on a stretch Of tn farm near the
boundary line fence and the justine Of
the peace rushed olt and mounted the
fencs. Then, with head cooked high and
the air Of one who has but to command,
he shouted, sin the name Of the State of
Indiana demand tbs preservation Of the
Dthtbl thth the AChSo saw V1S
under his weight, and as he went down
with the fence topping over to the Ohio
side be shouted to his son, "Give him the
Jim; I've lost my jurisdic-
tioni''
Judge Brewer Ia a firm believer In the
value CT plain. convincing argument, I'M
decorated by language of the 1owery type,
t-k rtu
When ne was stu iying law In New York
City he evinced some interest In the
campaign then on aud was n
vited to make speech on certain ocoas-
ion. Ha,sccepted. and carefully fortifytng
himself with infor mRtion on the subj sct,
aud otherwise preparing for his pirt of
the Irogramnie, he appeared on the plat
form in ample time. When he got up he
made an eloquent dep ction of the virtues
Of his party; he made deep drauRhts on
smile and metaphor; his sentences were
eJ q ulsitely rounded, and 1t WAS master
ly example Of class-iay oratlon. The
audience sat unmoved, an occasional nod
alone creating what he said The next
speaker was an upkempt individual.
careless Of grammar, who com mitted
wholesale slaughter of the English lan-
guage; but he made several eood points
In crude way that appealed to the
crowd, and when he ended the applause
was deaiening. AS the then wouli-be
lawyer with the lin, periods Lassed out
q man behind, not recognizing him,
Whispered In his ear. 81 like that second
Teller better; he talks ssnse."
The chinese minister, MIR. Wu Ting
Fang. hiss achieved great reputation for
bright speeches ard quick wit. and some
of his friends were telling brand-new
story about him the other day that showed
his power Of ready response. Ii was on a
big junket to the West not SO very long
ago, ard he was one OF large party
made up of officialdom, the Congress. the
diplom tic corps. the press ct ais. At n
little station that seemed to have been
dropped upon barren wilderness by "a
passing cloud the train stopped and o
crowd of townsmen gathered about the
car platform where he was standing
.."What's the population of this placer"
he asked of one of his party who was &C.
quainted with the state.
zone thousand"
"How many menr'
"One hundred"
"And womenf"
mine hundred"
He gratefully acknowledge the infor-
nation, reflected q momen {. walked In
side TIE car. gathered up some of his be-
longings ard began giving each member
of his party "a haDdshake.
"Why, what are you shaking forf"
some one asked.
This town." he answered. quick as a
flash. has nine hundred women and only
one hundred men. This Is where l get
off. Good bye"
A little while ago there was quist
little dinner, In the course of which IL
was up to Mr.. WI to speak. lie logan
with a complimentary sllusion to Ameri-
can ways, but said there are few things
about Oriental civilization aupsiior TO
our own. There had been some beastly
weather that week. and he turned to
Willis Moore, the weather bureau chief.
who sat CLOSE by. "For instance" he
said, hercely, eve in China would long
ago have cut OF this young mans head !"
IL dazed the company for minute, hut
they soon grasped the playful allusion to
the weather-maker and roundly greeted
the remark.
There Is a man at the head of one of the
Government bn-eaus of Washington
who IL almost entitled TO q certificate or
twinship with President Mckinley by
reason Of a markahle chain of ooinci-
dences that mark their early careers.
Captain Newton NJ. Brooks. superintend-
emit of the foreign mails, and for over a
score OF years identified with the admin
istfation of that sy stem, Is the man. Both
of them We're born on the goth of January,
is43. Each was the seventh child Of his
parents. Both WERE engaged In their
studies at educational institutions when
the war broke out and both enlisted AS
privates at the age Of eighteen. Both
carried THAR inusksts for fourteen months
and then received commissions. Both
came out OF the service as captains In u g.
tuai rank. The President, however, came
out In 1se5 undisahled, while the other
mourned leg at his discharge six months
earlier. Then, too, both sesyed under
General S. 5. Carroll OF this city, though
at different times. And there is strik-
ing similitude at other steps In their
early lives.
In speaking of John X. Mclean, one OF
the youngest of the newspaper men told
q eooi story on himself for the first time
the other day.
During the last Illness OF great stetss-
man some years ago the new reporter had
to keep an eye on the house and bulletin