Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-12-10
Mr.. BOWSER'S TRIBULATIONS.
He Buys a Recipe for the Benefit Of the Poor.

+, kitchen and asked the cook for the
kettle.
as it going to be an experiment with
gun-powder?' she asked, as she hand
ed it to him.
my dear woman" replied Mr. Bow
ser, as he looked at her sharply, Il
think you betray signs of consump-
| ton"
1T can't bel"
"But I'm sure of 1t. Do not be
alarmed, however, | am about to COM
pound a certain and speedy cure. One
bottle will restore you TO health, and it
won't cost you cent. l propose to
save 5000 lives this year.,
IF I've got consumption I'm going
right away to my sisters tonight"
exclaimed the cook as she united her
apron.
"But you can be saved"
But l can't watt"
Away she went to notify Mrs. Bowser
and pack her trunk, and Mr.. Bowser
hadn't got all his stuff mixed in his
kettle when he heard the front door
shut behind her. He expected call
and a protest from Mrs Bowser, but
she did not appear. He had brought
home molasses, gin, gum arabic,
,icorice and two or three other things,
which were to be mixed with the yolks
OF six eggs and heated over the fire,
and he needed no help. He had miXcl
according to recipe which had cost
him S., but when the compound began
to heat up the smell was not agree
able and the taste did not suit his pal
ate.
while it is the duty of consump>
tive to swallow cure without kick
ing" he unused as he looked about the
pantry, Il might as well mix in some
thing to tickle the palate. I'll just
shake in a little ginger. I've heard
that consumptives craved ginger
The ginger didn't seem to make
much change, and he grated in a nut
meg and then poured in half bottle of
vanilla. He was slowly stirring the
contents of the kettle and wondering il
lemon or two wouldn't make it just
right when the compound suddenly
foamed up and boiled over. AS 1t ran
over the edges CT the kettle there was
flash. sheet of flame and smoke
leaped to the ceiling. Mr.. Bowser was
in his slippers, and just after the burst
of fame had singed off his eyebrows
and curled his hair he felt something
hot strike his feet Mrs. Bowser heard
which Jared the house, but she sat
still. She heard Mr.. Bowser strike a
chair and pitch over it, scramble up
and bang open the back door, but she
held her chair. Then she knew that
he was galloping about the back yard,
and she heard people crying "Fire!"
but it was until the firemen were bang
ing away at the door that she rose up.
The house was full of smoke and smell,
but there was no fire. The firemen
had been gone ten minutes, and most
OF the smell had floated out upon the
night air, when Mr. Bowser entered
the sitting room and stood before her.
He was dilapidated man. He had suf-
fered, for the cause of humanity. He
lifted his right foot and his left foot
he gestured with his right arm and mis-
left arm. He wanted to say some
thing-he wanted to utter hundreds OF
words with six syllables, but his feel
ing oyercame him.
"1es, | know" quietly replied Mrs.
Bowser as she looked at him. eyes,
you want TO say that / made another
attempt to assassinate you, and that
the limit has been reached and divorce
must follow, but you can't get it out.
II were you I'd go to bed"
And like one in dream he dragged
his legs after him from stair to stair.
wondering and wondering, but speak
ing no word, and an hour later, when
Mrs. Bowser followed him, she found
him in bed with the clothes drawn up
to his chin and look of benevolence
on his face. He was dreaming of saw
ing the lives Of 5000 of his fellow crea-
lures annually, but as she gazed on him