Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-03-22

BY Goa. SOOQ grace
And the strength of our hand;
1.-The strength of our hand
On every land
Till the maSter-WOrk
Of the world be done:
For the slaves release,
For the bond of peace,
That wars may cease
From under the sun.
Charles G. d. Roberts in Pail Mall MaGa-
zine.
Its too bad about Kipling, isn't 1t z"
said the girl with the big blue eyes.
Yes said the girl with the spotted
veil. He's sick isn't he?"
Awful sick And you never saw any
body worry about him as George does.
You'd think he was one of the family.
How funny. Does George know
him?' :,
NO, only by what he has written.
Let me see What has he written?
''Oh, lots of things. George tries to
read some of them out loud, but they re
awfully poky. All about soldiers, and
ships, and Hindoos and things 1t makes
George 50 angry because L don't rave
over them"
He writes poetry. too, doesn't he?"
Yes. He wrote that what-do-you-call-
it. You know the one | mean-about
the lest-We-fOrget-it.
Then he wrote that awful thing he called
The Vampire Wasn't that too dread
ful?'
I've forgotten it.. Did you read his
Light that FailedT
No Was it-he-he-he--a bicycle
lamp:'
You silly thing. 1t was poky story
abOuC a blind man and A fool of a girl.
on couldn't have any patience with
them. But l get out here. Goodby.''
"GoOdby. cleveland Plain Dealer.
Fuddy-"Dilson says he isn't going to
New York until he goes on his wedding
trip
Duddy-"Any particular reason for
it?'
Fuddy-"He says when he is on his
wedding trip he expects to be so happy
that he won't notice the many things in
New York that make a Boston man
homesick. Boston Transcript.
A gentleman from London, hearing
some village people talking foolishly
about certain forgery case, could not
resist the temptation to join in the con-
versation, says the Weekly Telegraph.
In rough terms, you say it is impossi-
bic for the camera to detect faIsifed
handwriting he began. Now, how do
you arrive at that conclusion?'
BY thinking about it, mister an
swered an old husbandman IF a
chap can't tell when things forged by
looking at it, it amt likely a photy
will help him.
But [ know for a fact that photogra-
phy can. and often does, aid in the de-
lection of forgery declared the London
err IF, for instance, you were to forge
will, / could, by taking a photograph
Of it and comparing it with your own
writing, bring the crime home to you at
once"
No. you couldn't, mister retorted the
husbandman, stolidly; I can't write,'
This triumphant assertion ended the
argument, and the husbandman believes
to this day that his answer settled the
question once for all.
We were on our way home from Bonn
bay during the time Of the plague there,
when / overheard two of our men count
ing up the days we should be before we
reached Southampton.
Private A. suddenly remarked: "Why.
we have not passed quarantine yet"
For goodness sake shut upr' an
swered Private B. Don't show your
ignorance up that way. Quarantine isn't
place, it's a disease weekly Tele-
graph.
Seven-year-old Jessie, daughter of a
newspaper man, who has all Of her faith
er's admiration for his paper, and per-
haps more than his faith had her first
day in school recently.
Children, what makes it snow?'
asked the eacher
All the pupils looked puzzled except
the new member of the class, who held
up her hand.
Miss Jessie, what makes it snow?'
We'll, said the young lady, confident
ly. You see, God has Il box full of
snow up in the sky, and when he reads
In the -- in the morning that it's 60
ing to snow, he lets some out"
This was the same young lady who
sent her mamma into IN unusually deep
TT Of meditation. One day her mamma
remarked:
My, how it's showing and blowing"
Whats showing and blowing?" asked
Jessie.
Mamma vaguely replied Tt then sat
down to think.-New York Press.
-:o:-
New Justice-"Were you-h' never
arrested before?"
Prisoner-"Aw, say, Gully. Dis is no
place fer kiddingr'
-:O:
The New York Sun tells of man who
went to Cuba last summer VINO had
promised to bring back to girl at homo a
Spanish fag-from which it may be seen
what an extraordinary sort of man and
girl they were. But the man was pretty
busy in Cuba and the days passed with
out his getting hold of a Spanish flag.
Other fellows got them now and then and
stored them away and said how they
meant to give them 10 girls at home, but
not he. His regiment was ordered home
finally, and still no flag for him. The
thought of the eXpectant girl spurred him
on, however, and when he reached home
he was able to present her with a bit of
red and yellow bunting which practiced
eyes might perceive bore no relation to q
flag but which she received with such
joy that the man trembled at thought
of what might have happened had he