The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1899-11-25
FRANK PIhSBGRYS
~C0GNTERFEIT.
BY MRS. ALBERT r. COLLIER.
DON'T know what can have made us

1 DON'T know what can have made us
all take Frank Pilsbury for a fool,
but am sure we did so Judge him.
Some of them, if were to name them
here, might arise in their indignation and
effrontery and deny that they were ever
mistaken about PilsbuIy's mental caliber,
but it would be the height Of insncerity on
their part As for me, l freely confess that
/ thought him an extremely simple youth
until these things happened which sm
going to tel. And yet do not know why
we took him for fool unless it was be-
cause Of several outward indications which
we observed-to-wit
He parted his hair in the middle and
brushed It smooth on his forehead, which
was not high.
He wore kid gloves all through the
sumreg
He would talk earnestly with a girl for
an hour at n time, giving her points about
how 10 trim n hat.
But that is the worst OF these dudes. You
never knew quite for certain whether they
are fools clear through or only on the sur
face.
Tits mistake of ours was set right about
the close Of the war with Spain or a little
before its close. And it happened as follows:
Late in the spring OF 1898 Jeanette
Brennan WAS showing signals of distress,
and she let it be understood that the cause
of her distress was Frank Pilsbury. 1t ap-
peared that he was making love to her,
chiefly by giving her a great deal of his
socie.y--wlth advice on millinery matters
and also by presenting her with flowers
not artificial millinery flowers, but real
ones. All this bored Jeanette, and as
Jeanette was a good sort of girl we boys
said that it ought to be put stop to. Be-
sides, Jeanette was by public opinion
assigned TO be the fate Of one Robinson
who was not at all fool, like Pilsbury,
and was general favorite.
About this time it was reported that
Letitia Heimund had at last yielded to the
persistency Of Fred Stimms' woong and
had allowed him to call it an engagement
Then number of the boys enlisted for the
war, Fred among them, Frank Pilsbury
not. Everybody slapped Fred on the back
and called him good fellow. Everybody
felt sorry for Letitia Helmund because
Fred had gone to Tampa and was being
eaten by mosquitoes, and everybody felt
sorry for Jeanette because Frank would
not expose his perfect complexion to the
raVages o! these spiteful insects.
I.etitia Helmund was present one day
when somebody said Cant we make
Franz pilsbUry 20 off to the war? Can't
we bring public opinion to bear on him %
Ieuta sighed, thinking no doubt of poor
Fred Droiing and being eaten at Tampa.
Then e1c said III her Gentle, musical way,
"lf everybody wants poor Frank Pllsbury
out Of the ray, why not get him to go to
Tampa ?"
"Do you think be could be persuaded
to 20 thas Iar?'
Il think he might" said Letita
Why was it that nobody had thought of
this before? Frank Pilsbury was, by emf
hence, the squire of danes among us
Letitia plan was simply to go off herself
to Tampa 50 as to be near poor, heroic Fred,
and to make Frank 20 with her as escort.
Jeanette thanked her with tears OF graft
tude. Everybody called the plan an in
spirat'on 81 genius ard also a huge joke
The idea Of making pretty Frank 90 to that
abomnable den Ct mosquitoes and hold a
suushade over Letitia's head so that Fred
might make love to her in peace between
drills