The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-10-29
THE PROFEssoRs WAY.
Extremely Simple Method of Solving .
Troublesome Cat Problem.


Troublesome Cat Problem.
Il mover hear a cat caterwauling," said Col
Calliper without thinking OF how my old friend,
Professor Lucius Grilgobbler. circumvented the
cats that had been accustomed TO congTegnte on
his back fence. In Storkville Centre. Vermont
Professor Grl-that's what we all called him,
used to come there summers only: in winter he
would shut up the house, or else give 1t rent Tree
to somebody TO take care Of ii.
For other, don't know why
the back fence Of this house had always been .
favorite resort for The first night the professor
slept in the house-so he aftcrward told some Of
the neighbors-he was amazed at the number Of
cats ON the fence a I'd at the noise they made;
he said he never had seen or heard anything like
It, The next day the neghbors saw q. man at
aaas S 1p tas
ing II away Before night the man was back
there, putting on along The top Of The fence an,
like the one that had been taken off. except that
il was perhaps little more rounded, The neigh,
the two strips; but It turned out that the professor
knew what he wos about
IL was living in the second house from Prof,
GIRLS, and the same side Of the street could
see his back fence from my second.story rear
Min w everybo3y else hat knew about the change,
there was Just as much noise as ever; as matter
Of fact, there was more than ever before. My
! grncousl You never heard anything like II in
your life / should think they had there not
only all the cats in creation but that individually
they were making more noise than any cats had
ever made before and there was a new note in
/ their voices and an added sound that had never
| dow 10 see what these things meant l saw some
/ thing very singular.
THE cats would come up from the fences ON
either side and start along on the professors
| fence, as they had always DONE hoTling in Just
the ordinary way, but before they'd gone three
and all the time making desperate efforts to hold
and astonishmcni, and ,lhcn as they began 10
slip about and, despite their most frantic efforts
TO cling TO it, to lose their hold entirely, they'd get
Wild and frrnziedi and begin to howl and shrek
I like wild cats And then presently would come
Pat new note ne most nnsaf bs e enmn mar when
the ca, was finally comgeLled to let CO. and drop
fitted cal wen, down; and that new, added sound.
lis dun hmd as s'I nnd The only
down For while there was the greatest
there was quiet, perfect quiet end the next nigh:
there wasn't cat on the Professors fence. not
bo rho DIV And all Storkvie wondered Some
people said one thing, some, said another; mos!
it. somehow, but We couldn't SEQ any wires.
nor anything else, for that matter; and that made
it seem all the more wonderful: Prof GrilEobblea5
that though they didn't know Just what II was.
he must have put into operation hght ,t there IN
But one night one Of the neighbors saw tho
Professor, out in his back yard by the fence with
on the fence and then il all came out That
smooth top strip was simply the old strip covered
with covering Of sheet iron carefully rounded
and the stuff in the pan was kitchen grease, that's
, all which the crudiie Professor put on with a
paint brush; and that's all there was to IT; the
cats simply couldn't stay on the fence, and SO
they STAYED away from it.
Il think 1t was a little shock 10 some Of u.s. to
I have the Professor go about il in this way; We
would have expected him to bring to bca! on
the solution Of this cat problem comic sections
and loGarthms and all sorts OF scholarly and
scientific aids; whereas he had really gone at it
in the simplest way in the world; And then
there were others OF us to whom this fact was
a comfort; who found pleasure in tho reflection
that when il came to the practical affair OF lie
algebra didn't count 80 much as gumpton.
but, however thoy might regard the means
by which the result was reached. everybody con-
coded that the method was successful and at
once all over the village people began putting
up, on their back fences, what. was called, by
common consent, the Professors cat rail: and
for n long time in fact, people paid attention
to these rails and kept them creased the back
fences of Stotkville Centre were comparatively
free OF cats"