Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1899-08-12

1t was about twilight, and Mr.. Jobson
stood in the middle of the back parlor and
surveyed the situation.
Madam said he sepulchrally to Mrs.
Jobson, did you have any particular I'M
revealed motive IN giving my residence over
into the possession of that pin-headed black
female servant of yours before my return
here to resume my domicile?'
Mrs Jobson looked mystified.
I'm sure 1 don't know what you are
talking about" she started to say, but
Mr.. Jobson broke in.
"Of course" said he. sarcastically, "you
dlun't write to that half-witted Afro-Amer-
at the beach, telling her to come here and
make her daily headquarters here during
our absence. And of course she hasn't
gone off to a parlor social just before every
rain storm and left these windows open so
that the waters of heaven could splash in
here. And Of course you couldn't have
taken my word for 1t that left this house
tighter than a No. 6 shoe would be on your
foot, but you had TO-
1t was Mrs. Jobsons turn to interrupt
Even If 1 had done such simple thing"
she said mildly. how could Polly have
the house along with your"
Madam" replied Mr.. Jobson, in tone
Of sorrowful calm, "a woman who places
so little reliance In her husbands judgment
and ordinary common sense as you Is quite
capable of having duplicate keys made for
the accomplishment of any underhand pug
pose which she may have in contempla-
ton
Mrs. Jobson was meanwhile making an
Intellectual effort to light the gas. There
was no gas.
THE bill was left two days before I went
away" explained Mrs. Jobson, serenely
land you put it your pocket and started
down to pay it, Did you? Anyway, thcv
have turned off our gas"
Mr.. Jobson regarded Mrs. Jobson with
the expression of a deeply-injured man.
Then a flash of suspicion came into his
eyes.
This is the work. will not go SO far as
to say that 1t Is at your direct instigation,
Mrs. Jobsen-but 1t is the work of that
half-imbecile relative of yours at the gas
office. I am beginning to perceive in all
this a conspiracy to wreck my hap"
Mrs. Jobson was pointing to large bun
die Of newspapers piled up Just inside the
basement door-for they had descended to
| the basement.
1.-The Star paper-seventeen of them-one
| for each day we've been away, of course"
| said Mrs. Jobson, picking them up and
| counting them. THE boy always throws
| them through the transom of the base
| ment door, your know, and you see, the
| transom is open. So the boy did not know
we were away
Mr.. Jobson thrust his hands into his
| trousers pockets and ratified the keys and
change therein. He regarded his wife with
bland sarcasm.
Il can see it all now, Mrs. Jobson," said
| he. It's a plain, ordinary, onnery every
| day conspiracy. It's one of your put-up
i JoDS 10 Hulullldte me ana make me feel ike
| one-eighth of a gill of carbonated Poto-
| mac water. I suppose the milkman has
| been here every morning and left his jar
| of pale blueing at the basement door I've
got no doubt the iceman has happened
| around this way each dewy morn with the
| usual fiftean-cent hunk Of GOODNESS for the
| caterpillarst and snaiis to crawl over.
suppose the punk-braned bakers boy has
| slammed the regular matutnal dozen of
| rolls up against the basement door every
| morning, too. It's just a job, that's ali.
| You deserted the home for which I've had
| to slave and toll and mol in order to keen
| it going and to keep you in Queen of
| Sheba like luxury. because you knew all
| these things were going to happen and
because yop wapted to point the finger of
| scorn at me over it all. You've been just
| tlckled to death and hugging yourself all
| the time we've been away because you
| knew WEEDS find jthe whole outfit gone to
| smash when ws1got back, and you could
| throw it in my teethl Well, this is the
| finish! I'll see the legal sharp in the morn
| ing and We'll go it aloneT'
Then Mr.! Jobson sneaked around to the
| corner grocery. and bought a lamp and
| some oil, and wondered what he'd do if he
| didn't have a Conspiracy or something
| to fall back on in tight places.