davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28
Lnrrigan Got a job.

"A curious-looking chap ran in here the
other day" said the vaudeville booking
agent. according to the New York Sun,
land throwing himself down on that
couch. said to me in excited fashion:
That's the narrowest escape 1 ever
had
Who are you, anyway 1 asked.
I came mighty near not being any
body at an he said, suddenly becoming
serious. That's a fact. l came mighty
near not being anybody at all Nothing
but my cussed luck saved me from four
kinds of destruction; yes, five kinds or
destruction
Il saw 1 was up against a crank, and
thought that the best thing 1 could do
was to let him talk himself out. 1 wasn't
busy, anyway, and ne struck me as being
kind of funny.
Well 1 suppose you're going to tell
me all about it, l said. Fire away.
g I'm the luckiest man in the world,
he said, and you'll agree with me when
I'm through. l got up this morning feel
ing very blue. When / got through eating
my breakfast 1 was bluer than ever By
10 O'Clock | was dead certain that the only
rest for me was in death. got more and
more stuck on this idea the more
thought about it. Finally 1 just made
up my mind that I'd do it, and, having
come to that conclusion, 1 swore I'd make
a clean job of it, so l went out and bought
a can of kerosene oil. box Of matches
two ounces of arsenic, twenty yards OF
good strong rope and a big revolver. With
this outfit went up on the Harlem river,
and got a boat. l rowed along until
came to a quiet spot where there was a
tree, with a long branch extending out
over the river. I stopped under this
na TO Thap
made moose on the end of the rope, put
it around my neck and hauled it so tight
that when / kicked the boat out from
under me I'd be left swinging there. Next
/ poured the kerosene oil over me, swal-
lowed the arsenic touched my oily clothes
off with a match, put the revolver 10
my head and fired, kicking the boat out
from under me at the same time.
80 You re q liar l exclaimed at this
point, for I'd become so interested that
I forgot l was dealing with a crank.
" Hold on now he said, wait till you
hear the rest, and your believe I'm the
luckiest man in the word. You see, kick
ing the boat out from under me threw
my pistol hand up, and the bullet went
through the rope, cutting it in half, so
that l fell into the water. Well, the wa
ter put out the fire, and I swallowed so
much of the dirty stuff that 1 got sick
and was relieved of the arsenic. B'gosh,
If I hadn't known how TO swim, I'd a
drowned right there
"'say, what kind of pipe dream is
this, anyway?' I asked.
"'Just one of my stories,' said the man
suddenly becoming business like. I'm
Larrigan the comic juggler, and l tell
stories like that one while 1 Jungle Can
you book me?'
Il booked Larrigan for the business of
the season, and I venture to say that no
comedian ever got job by such novel
methods before"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28
The RIue and the Grnx.

Inscribed to Col. Willard Glazier, Com
mander-in-Chief of the Blue and Gray
Legion
All the world wondered when our guns
Numbered,
Down in the isles of despair, night and
day;
Grim veterans mingled; how their veins
tingled
With the old thrill of battle! One flag
for this frayl
Now God save our heroes; the Blue and
While Dewey is reaping his laurels of
May.
When the drums quickened, where the
fight thinckened,
Vengeance for loss of maine" brooked
no delay;
There was rain of hot tears, for the blood
past years,
And "Comrade, lean on me-" from Blue
to the Gray
"Our Countrywide last word to hear
or to say.
O! was it not glory-the marvellous story?
North and South keeping step"-just
the old way!
White men to dare and die, under a
blazing sky
for the wrongs OF their Drothers? o,
brave Blue and Gray
With tyrrany routed from forest and
bay.
Hail to our ruler just! Honor to soldiers
dust!
Peace and earth's praise for our nation
to-day,
Not a lad fought in vain! Justice to cruel
Spain
Valor won! We retain! Who'll saw MS
''nay?"
Old Glory forever for Blue and for
Gray.
Helen Hinsdale Rich
Chicago. May 20, 1899.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

helping hand would meet with a rather
cool reception.
II the soldiers outside of Havana also re-
fuse to accept the money and give up
their guns, the 100000 viii be brought
back TO this country. and many of the sol
diers probably will attempt TO make a
living with their guns-that is, they VIII
become robbers. win it be pleasant to the
Cuban generals to know that the prosper
ity Of their island is obsructed by bri-
gands?' And yet if lawlessness, and even
war. comes they viii know that they are
almost wholly responsible for it.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

The MORNING NEWS is published
every day In the year. and is served to
subscribers in the city. or sent by mail,
AT 500 month, $500 Tor six months, and
5000 for one year.
The MORNING NEWS. by mail, six
times week (without Sunday issue,
three months. 800; six months, 500; one
year, $50.
The WEEKLY NEWS. issues week,
Monday and Thursday, by mail. one year,
Sl.OO.
subscriptions payable in advance. Remit
by postal orders, check or registered let
ter Currency sent by mail at risk Of
senders.
Transient advertisements. other than
special column, local or reading notices.
amusements anu cheap OF want column. ~
cents a line Fourteen lines of agate
type-equal TO one inch square I'm depth
is the standard of measurement. Con
tract rates and discounts made known on
applica ton at business office.
orders for delivery of the MORNING
NEWS 10 either residence or place OF busi-
ness may be made by postal card OF
through telephone No. 2lO. Any irregular
sly In delivery should he Immediately re-
ported to the office OF publication.
Letters and kilograms should be ad-
dressed MORNING NEWS" Savannah
Ga.
EASTERN OFFICE. q Park Row. New
York city, c. S. Faulkner, Manager
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28
Presence of Mind.

The late Isaac Bromley, noted editorial
writer, was ''cool, calm and collected"
Seldom was he put into place so tight
that his nerve did not disclose an omen
door. The New Haven Register tells this
story of the way he once saved himself:
Bromley was lecturing before local in
stitute in Lichtield county, Connecticut.
upon trip he had recently made to Cali
fornia and the Yosemite valley, and con-
Guided with a beautiful description of the
Bridal Veil falls. which so charm all who
visit them. AS he took his seat he was
surprised to see the man who had presided
over the meeting step forward and say;
In accordance with our usual custom.
we shall now be glad to hear any oues-
tons that the lecturer may be desired to
answer in relation to the subject upon
which he has been talking At this a tall
red-headed man rose in the audience. and
with rasping voice said: :. would like
to ask the lecturer the exact hight of the
Bridal Veil.' Bromley, who had expect-
ed nothing of this kind, and was never
strong in figures, was entirely taken bv
surprise, but gave no sign thereof as he
rose and advanced to the front of the
platform and coolly answered: I did
measure them, but as nearly. as I can re-
member, the exact hight is 361 feet 9Ih
inches No further questions were ask
ed"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28
A Shooting Fnmilv-

A week ago there was set up in the GEM
etery at Debrecsln, in Eastern Hungary.
a tombstone which might well have served
as a record of the House of Aureus. saws
the London Chronicle. We give the in
scrption in English:
Here rest in the Lord
Joseph Moritz, Sen, who died in his
sixty-second year. He was shot by his
wife
Frau Joseph Moritz, Sen, who died in
her forty-seventh year. She was
shot by her daughter
Elizabeth Moritz, who died by her
own hand in her seventeenth year, after
shooting her mother.
Joseph Morltz, who died in prison. eeed
twenty-seven. He had shot his father
May Eternal Mercy have pity on their
poor. sinful souls.
This strange memorial has been erected
by a local literary association, 70 which
the last of the Moritz family left about
$500 for this purpose.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28
CURRENT COMMENT.


The Birmingham Age-Herald Dem)
says: "The present prevalent trust con
spracy is directed alike against producers
of raw materials and consumers of goods,
and IL will prove also to be directed against
labor, for the time win come when profits
on watered stocks and bonds cannot be
secured except by squeezing an-produc-
ers, labor and consumers. The trusts
know what is coming. They know the
American people will not be led like sheep
to the slaughter. They know there Will
be kicking of very vigorous sort, but
they know what they can secure from the
Republican party by the slush-fund route.
They know that the robber tariff can be
maintained intact through that party, and
that is about all they want"
The Chicago Record Qnd.) says: 'In
the heart of the Tagal there is no capacity
to understand the motives of an enemy
who shows kindness TO his foe. He re-
CARDS ieniency and even justice to an an
tagonist in arms against him as evidences
OF weakness. 1t is this characteristic OF
the Philippine natives that makes the sit
cation in Luzon far less promising than
1t would appear 10 be If our troops were
fighting civilized people"
The Richmond Dispatch (Dem.) says:
THE shot on the lynching question that
ex-Gov. Northen of Georgia fired at his
New England audience evidently went
through the heating process before the
speaker loaded himself up with them. And
from the way the New England papers
have been squirming since the fusiade, il
would seem that the said shot burned TO
the core"
The Springfield CMass) Republican Qnd.)
says: Those Filipinos may be savages,
but their talent for diplomacy would make
Abdul Hamid white with jealousy. Four
times now have they entered our lines to
negotiate for peace, and four times have
they Withdrawn much interested" in our
proposals. They now want to know what
Congress is likely to do with them. And
the fighting continues"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28
THIS ISSUE
CONTAINS
TW ENTITY PAGES
INDEX TO NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.

Meetings-Forest City Gun Club; Lafay
cite McLaws Camp, No. $50, U. c. V.
Special Notices-Desirable Residence for
Sale, Walthour & Rivers; The Columbia
Wheel T. A. Bryson, Columbia Agent;
Proposals Wanted by Young Mems He
brew Association for a Home From Sept.
!; Once a Customer Always a Friend, II.
H. Cohen & Co.; Bicycle Suits, Leopold
Adler; You and Everybody Can Have
Conidas Ice Cream; Ryan's Business Col
lege; Miss NJ. c. Benefits Annual May
Ball, May 80; To the Trading Public. Leo
pold Adler; A Charity Sociable, 119 Liber-
ty Street, East, May %; stearns Bicycles
for 80, r. V. Connerat; Joseph II. Bakers
Stall, &C Market; The Gorrie Ice, The Cor
RE Ice Manufacturing Company; Special
Notice, ]. E. Fulton & Son: Neck and
Sash Buckles, at Desbouillons, the jew
eler; Early Closing Retail Dry Goods.
Clothing, Mems Furnishings: Notice to
Superior Court Jurors; Tetley's Teas at
Abercorn Grocery.
Business Notices-E. & w. Laundry; We
DO Not Claim the Earth, Savannah Steam
Laundry Company; Shoes Repaired and
Shoes Made at Okarma's
Where Your Money VIII Buy Most and
Best-Faik Clothing Company
Very Interesting Bargain Opportunities
This Week-Foye & Morrison.
Successful Business-M. S. Brown.
Insurance-The Mutual Life Insurance
Company OF New York.
Excursions-Annual Picnic of Isle of
Hope Union Sunday School, May 80, at
Warsaw; Annual Picnic of Sunday
School of ST. Johns Episcopal Church at
Tybee. May 81
Lightning Freezers, Etc.-Thos West &
Co.
1t Is As Good as It Loolzsl-savannah
Carriage and Wagon Company.
Ginghams Going Low-Daniel Hogan.
Time to Awake-Byck Bros.
Summer Resorts-Prospect Park Hotel,
catskill Mountains. Catsk.n, N. Y.
Inauguration of Our Special ''Cut Price"
Sale in Harness-Leo Frank
Water Coolers. Etc.-Edward Lovell's
Sons.
Are You Going to Paint-southern Paint,
Glass and wen Paper Company.
Special Sale Eye Glasses and spectacles
AT Gardner's Bazaar
From the Old Hoss Sales. Bernstein.
Auction sales-Valuable Medical Libra
ry, by c. H. Dorset, Auctioneer.
Special Sale-At Gutman's-
Selected Georgia Syrup, Etc.-C. A.
Munster.
Special Negligee Shirt Sale-At The Hub.
Our Ability to Please the Ladies-Walsh
& Meyer
The River Seeks the ocean-At Levy's.
Cut Prices to Promote Great sales-I.eo-
pold Adler
Always the Best OF Everything for the
least Money-At Gutman's
Annual stock-Taking sale--At Eek
STEMS
Prudence Suggests Economy-Mutual
Gas Light Company.
Postum Cereal Coffee-Postum Cereal
Company.
Distract OF Beef-Liebig's.
Medical-Radway' Pills: Erie Medical
Company Lydia Pinkham's Vegetable
Compound; S. S. s.: Sawyers Remedies
Worlds Dispensary Preparations; Hoods
Sarsaparilla; Cuucura Remedies; DR.. Ken.
pedys Favorite Remedy; p. p. p; Sui
plum; Johann Hofs Genuine Malt Elk.
tract; DR. Hathaway & Co.. Munyon's
Guarantee; Seven Sutherland Sisters
Scalp Cleaner and Hair Grower: Mothers
Freud; Abbo.
Cheap Column Advertisements
Wanted; Employment Wanted; For Rent
For Sale Lost; Personal: Miscellaneous
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28
THE COMMENCEMENT SEASON,

The mails are now bringing square en-
velopes which contain reminders that the
college commencement season is at hand;
the season of speeches and essays, OF
diplomas and honorable mention, of laugh
ter and tears, of "the sweet girl graduate"
and her esteemed contemporary of The op-
posite sex who, while he may not be call
ed sweet, is usually a very decent and
clean sort of a fellow, worthy of friend
ship and encouragement. Many of those
who have left commencement days far be-
hind in their own lives, and who imagine
themselves to have accumulated wisdom
with years, affect to regard commencement
exercises as being insipid or frothy, or
both. But the fact is, if the wiseacres would
only acknowledge it, that there is more of
truth, earnestness, sincerity and human
kindness in the little speeches, the little
essays and the little weepings which are
inseparable from graduation days than the
participants in them wta probably know
in years to come, after they have for some
time associated with their critics. for the
older heads win teach them politics. and
commerce. and finance. and coquetry per
haps) in which arts and wiles are account
ed accomplishments with which to win
success.
When the "sweet girl graduate" writes
an essay to her dear teachers and dear
companions on the sweet sorrow of part
ing, it is a terribly earnest piece of bust
ness, and she means every word that she
writes. The best friendships of lfe-the
most lasting and the truest-are made In
youth, and at school. The adult of forty
forms few friendships which are charac-
terized by that sticking quality which
marks friendships formed in youth, and
after the age of fifty is passed those pleas
ant incidents of life become sull more
rare. The young person accepts a friend
and excuses faults; an old person studies
the individual, and is satisfied to be
merely an acquaintance. The young per-
sons emotions are natural; the old ones
are artificial. And that is why the young
girls essay, ebullient with superlatIve ad-
jectives and poetic SMILES, should not be
derlded, but accepted as expressing truth
and honest sentiment.
And the colege young man who de-
claims of world policies with as much ease
and rhetoric as a congressman making
Fourth of July speech, is also sincere and
very much in earnest. He may part his
hair IN the middle. and his hat may fit
little tightly but those things should not
be counted against him. He is all right A
few years out of school will get the hair
parted in the proper place and reduce the
temporary swelling, and then he will be
just as good a business man and citizen.
| husband and father, any of those who
| formerly poked fun at him.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

The custom authorizes at New Orleans
have got into a tangle of snakes that is
bothering them snake charmer and
his wife from Brazil entered that port NOS
long ago with a large lot of performing
snakes. The charmer Gained that the
snakes We're his tools of trade, and were
therefore not liable 10 a tariff duty. The
custom house officers were rather of the
opinion that the collection constituted a
menagerie and ought to be taxed 20 per
cent. ad valorem. The matter has been
referred to Washington; and it is intimat-
ed that the authorities there, as well as
the snakes and the officials in New Or
leans are just a bit ratified.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

The 'undershirt' law and the anti-smok-
ms law went into effect in Havana last
Monday II is stated that on the first day
there were something like 500 arrests. Such
Ni-eonsioered. picayunlsh, tyrannica avs
can hardly have any other effect than 10
convince the Cubans chan we mean TO in
s'''ute petty tyranny instead of freedom
in Cuba
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28
GARDENERS BAZAAR,
Il BTOushtOn Street, East

SPECIAL SALE
Eyeglasses and Spectacles, pair, 1Oc;
biggest value for the money ever offered
Il ream-1A to- 112 pounds excellent
Note Paper, 10c.
A-1,O0O good Envelopes, 22c.
Excellent Ink Tablets, 15c, 1Oc, sc and
4c
Genuine Bond Linen Envelopes, pack
10c.
Genuine Irish Linen Note Paper, qulre
12c.
Is Envelopes, "a sheets Splendid Paper
sc.
Esterbrooke. Spencerian and elliott
Pens, dozen, &c.
Splendid Cuspidors, each, 10c.
Handsome Jardiniers, 10c.
Plant Food, pound, DC.
Child Garden Sets, sc.
Croquet Sets, 73c.
Crockinole Board, $1,T.
Carrom Board, $500.
Beauty Pins, Guilt and Mourning, for
&c.
Beautiful Collarette Buckles, 25c.
Handsome Belt Buckles, 75c, SOC, 25c
Nobby Shirt Waist Pin Sets, handsome
settings, zoe.
Very pretty and substantial Cuff But
tons, 25c.
Very pretty Collar Pins, 25c.
Friendship Hearts, 1Oc.
Best Tooth ever offered in this city for
10c.
Cutcle Soap, 8 cakes, Csc.
Baby Rattles, &C.
Dolls, Games, Toys, Lunch Baskets,
Cages, Bird Seed and Food, Gold Fish and
1000 Paper Novels. standard authors
10c.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

Yesterday we printed an Associated
Press dispatch from Manila in which 1t
was stated that events during the past
week had emphasized ''the need of much
larger army here" This is significant, be-
cause of the fact that dispatches from
Malina must pass through the hands of a
military press CENSOR
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

Prof Arthur Twinlng Hadley, who mas
been elected to the presidency of Yale, to
succeed President Dwight, whose term ex-
pires with the close of the college year,
June 3d. is the first .ayman who has ever
been considered in connection with the Of
fee Since Abraham Pierson, a Harvard
graduate, became Yales first executive
head, in 1902. Congregational clergymen
have succeeded each other as presidents of
the university. Prof Hadey is Yale
man by both inheritance and training. His
father was professor Of Greek in the uni
versity for many years, and he himself,
after having gradua cd from Yale in 1876,
and serving as a tutor in the Institution
until 70, has been professor there ever
since. President-elect Hadley is 43 years
old.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

The postoffice department will send an
inspectortto Lake City, s. c., to look over
the situation with a view to determining
whether postofice shall be re-esta blished
there. The inspector will find some soft
spot upon which Bristow, the underling
who imagined that he was clothed with
judicial and executive powers of plenary
scope, may fall and he will fall upon it,
The postohice at Lake City will be re-
established. We are not living under a
bureaucracy. Notwithstanding Mr.. Fourth
Assistant Postmaster General Bristow
seems TO think we are
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

Isn't is marvellous how quickly a lie
travels and how long it takes the truth
TO overtake it? The New York Evening
Post says that money expended in publish
ing and distributing advertising matter
descriptive of Georgia's resources viii
be thrown away so long as Georgia al
lows barbarous iynchings, and so long as
judges Of her courts say, as ore did to a
convicted criminal the other day, that It
was pity he had not been lynched' No
Georgia judge ever said any such thing.
1t was reported some days ago that Judge
Gambler of Atlanta had made such a state
ment but the report was false, as Judge
Gambler has positively asserted, and has
been published in various newspapers II
The Evening Post reads the Georgia pa
pers it must have seen the denial; never
theless 1t is willing to add the weight of
its influence to keep the lie going.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

Andrew jackson has been nominated for
sheriff of Lancaster county. PENNSYLVANIA
1t must not be supposed that this is the
Andrew jackson who licked Packenham
at New Orleans a good many years ago
and for whom the people OF one
OF the counties In this state
have been voting for President
of the United States ever since,
according 20 an old story; ii is another
Andrew altogether.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1899-05-28

IF YOU WANT GOOD MATERIAL
and work. order your Autographed anu
printed stationery and blank books from
Morning News, Savannah, Ga.
The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-11-12
MENDKLssOHN HALL.
CAPPIANpS GRAND CONCERT

such distinguished artists a. tho Prims Donna
soprano Laura Ballini. the Nero soprano Helen d.
q. DEL PUENTE, the Violinist HEKBERT
ARNOLD and other eminent artists MAJ hszlsr.
accompanied.
The Irish standard., 1899-04-01
ORDER As No. 29S.
1906

Cut this adj out and send it u.s. and will send you
this Single Buggy Harness by express d. subject
examination. You examine it your express Office
that retail at $500 to SIS and the greatest value
express charges less the SIC sent with the order,
S7.95.
ness made heavy selected Oak Tanned Leath
err heavy single strap saddle long patent leather
jockey Traces are extra heavy, raised edges TX
in. vide. BrideExtra high grade. side rein or
initial resettes fancy head piece Breast
folded neck strap BreechngVery heavy folded, heavy
layer Bring stay heavy hip and side straps extra heavy
black tan x1s in. handparts with spring billets
nSSi q q black rub
ORDER AT ONCE. We will save you $500 to $1,000
Write for free Harness and Buggy Catalogue.
The Irish standard., 1899-04-01

$l775 strong very heavy through
$l5 9s
* .h sass e sg0 o
In and fancy housings heavy hook and ferret
j,
heavy " inch With and breast
piSa y,ht q Trims
$500 need heavy doabls ha
Buggy Cata
The Irish standard., 1899-04-01

Unstable swing key slip with our new style ,ex
handsome top to organ. A large receptacle 1
frames with the best brussels carpet; on each
meath to move the organ about with ease. III
brilliancy. combined with great power, and
Of orchestral toned reeds. two of three octave
Diapason, Duloet, Principal, Cremona, Melo'
Forte. Treble Coupler, Grand Organ and Kn
mont, $50 Lbs. Former Price. 1910. New Pr
accompanies order, $96.7b. Send for Free Or
- ]. y. Roberts, Supply House,
The Irish standard., 1899-04-01
Two Biz Bargains in Bedroom Suits,
Big Bargain No. 4.

No: 74o4a board Of bed Bed is s IT, BIZ
has fancy shaped Top mirror 1924 German
contains two drawers with polished brass This
equal not better than suits would Our
pieces commode ready for shnment
The Irish standard., 1899-04-01
SEND Us 81 CENTS
Order as Our Leader. =

Gut this ad out and send to
us and We will send you this
heavy double farm harness
by freight @. O. d., subject to
examination;you can exam.
inc it at your freight depot
and IL you find it equal to
harness others get $50 to SIS
for. perfectly satisfactory
and the greatest value you
ever saw, pay the freight
agent our SPECIAL OFFER
PRICE. $l7.75, and freight
charges, less the 97cts sent
with order. The harness
hoxad woinha El lha Onr