The Worthington advance., 1899-07-14
eEph lie kind o p,.ll.d his II 1lskers.

lugged a slammin' big mess O them
chubs o. Eph's home with it, and want
ed that pork to fry 'em in!'
Il hadn't said nothin', but begun to
think that if 1T was as interestin' as
they was sayin' it was, it behooved me
to git on its trail, so ! says to Eph:
s s Was it much for size?' says. Was
it as big as any Gil ever killed? 2 says.
Cause Gil was a tremendous hunt,
er, but a poor jedge O heft.
Big as any Gil ever killed!' says
Eph. Why, thunder! It was bigger yit
than any Gil ever said he killed!'
''Gil didn't say nothin', but begun to
Steve he .snorted right out, and says:
3 "'Eph,' he says, if I was you I
wouldn't take a jug with me no more
when I went fshin'; and when I see
Jonas I'll have to warn him to have
the size of his snake-cure pocket cut
down from quart to pint, cause you
fellers is beginning to see things!' he
says. -. II
But thinks to myself that where
there was SO much smoke there must
be some fire, and I thought it mowt be
worth my while gittin' onto it's track.
So next day I started out. I heerd Oh
it here and there and most everywhere,
and begun to think that maybe Pau
pack Steve had been leetle too hard
on Eph and Jonas, after all. I heerd
on it bein' at Jake's, where it broke into
the milkhouse, lugged out a 12-quart
~ wifi
goin' to do her chrnin' with, and sot
down on the back stoop and swamped
the hull ~ quarts. hardly stoppin' to
breathe. Then it took the crock and
smashed it ag'in the door, as much as
if to give notice to the folks inside that
they'd better be a comm out and look
in after things. Jake told me all about
the doin's. He didn't see 'em himself,
he said, cause he didn't happen to be
home, but his wife seen 'em, he said.
and was so scared that it was all she
could do to tell him when he got home.
''And that's the way it kept goin' on
similar all around the country, 'cordin'
to what folks'd tell me here and there,
but couldn't strike it's trail for GER
tain for more'n six weeks, and then 1
did. Job told me that it had got into
one of his traps, and had took the trap
along with it. This give me the trail,
and it p'inted straight for the big tam
arack swamp. hadn't gone more'n
two miles when I-come to the trap. It
laid under a hemlock root, and there
was a couple O. toes in it with claws
on 'em two inches long.
It's yanked it self loose, hay?' says.
1t won't be SO gay and funny now when
I come up to it as folks has been say
in it's Eeen,' says.
And before long I come up to it,
backed ag'in u big hemlock, nussin' it's
sore foot. When it see me it just ripped
and tore. It sot me down as bein' the
one that had got it into trouble, and it
riz up and howled and smashed and
showed set o. teeth that made me
quiver.
'Eph was right says I. It's bigger
yit than any Gil ever said he killed.
"Not wantin' to see such an unpleas-
in showin' of temper any longer than
could help, pulled up and whanged
away. That must s'prised it, for it
turned and went smashin' away so fast
that it got out O. sight in the brush
fore could give it another one. fol-
lowed it, though, and it led plump to the
laurel patch t'other side o. the Knob.
hurried round by the cowpath and
was standin' there when I see Pete
comm long the path on his way to the
Hobby road, and see that he was goin'
to leave the path and make a short cut
through the patch, jest cause it'd save
him mebbe somethin' like an eighth of
a miled, and says to him:
"'You'd better keep the path, Peter
I says, and go round
"Pete, bein' stubborn and head
strong, kind O. shifted at Inc and says:
"'What fer?'
"'Well, says, it'll be considerable
further for you, but if you keep the
path you'll get there good deal
sooner
"'Cause I know'd it was in there, but
Pete gave sniff and plunged right
into the patch and went on. I don't
know exacly whether it was on top
or whether Pete was on top.:when they
came out, and hain't never been able
to figure out jist how managed to git
ball through it and stiffen of it out for
good and air without KILN Pete, they
was so kind O. mixed up; but I did.
Then I got Pete around, and as soon
as he could get back some idee o. what
had been goin' on he says:
"'Danl, think it swatted me!'
There amt no doubt about it, Pete
I says. You ought to KEEP the path
'The first time that folks sees Pete
they maturity wonder how he happened
to tumble into the thrashin' machine,
seein' that left ear O. his'n hangin' most
down on his shoulder, and his face all
wopperjawed, and him favorin' that
left leg O. his'n as if lie want Just sure
whether it was goin' to stay there when
he puts his foot down, or whether it
want. But he didn't tumble into no
thrashin' machine. He was swatted.
And the bear that swatted him was big
ger yet than any that Gil ever said he
killed.'-N. Y. Sun.
A Hearty Eater. ~ =
Two girls were overheard talking to-
gether on Ontario street.