The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1899-07-23

a Gis@pse ~ Av1y Life $50 m sne1-
aenfsI Pies for the Csnfeen.

aentsI Pies for the csnfeea.
kkEy Ar. this In rich, It's fnstrurtsve
asd improving. It's tbs siicksss
thing We ssen yet. It's positively
enchanting. sswseen.ng. ravishinx- Talk
about your hixh-class felton, Nny. now
els areast In 1t with thiss Fer picturesque
description. Imagination. pure inventive
genius. this takes the cake. ! Used TO
thzHx Mark Twain was funny. but after
this he goes 50 the sheis. and when need
feai hufaor 10 cheer me up read nothing
but this A. Saxe says.
The dssputsHsx I wesn
Ra!l en- Ia Etser ignorance
OF what each other mean,
And pirate about an elephant
Not cFae Of fbe1H has seem
''what calls forth this burst Of eli
0uance. Harry Looks like the ceugres-
at0nl Record you've got there. There
never was any fun Ia that"
eOhs There wasn't. chr Wei. you men
glance ovsr these remarks on the canteen.
and yoa u change yotr mfnds.''
For the nsxt ten minutes the group Of
eflcsrs seAnsd over the table and devoured
The Record. occaxtunaily interrupted by
shouts OF hearty laughter Finally they
returned 70 their chairs, locked from one
20 u1< other with Amusement In their
faces. and then. a. BY common consent.
burst Into loud laugh
1nys m 9sSsA& I'd HauW y1At 10 ny
wife, said one. '.Shs runs q monthly
eanteen bali az from 80 20 &c Won't sisc
De Mortified when She sees what a sinful
Institution II il she eonnfves at! She'll
think X wicked 90 buy another egg or
another pound Of butter there. But. hello.
the colonel doesn't seem TO be as much
amused AZ this rest Of Us. What's the
trvubfe. coicuelf'
Tin not amused. There's no fun In IT,
IVA 1u1RA ff1e arryav srh aprtnh a,ss 40
Was common. but now thinga are different.
The canteen has been the Host powerful
temperance agent wa have had. To de.
otroy Il would be TO make a step hack
ward Yemembcr this very post when Ii
was fairly surrounded by ginfniils Tho
eafiteea destroyed their business and they
vanished But ] understand that three
different parties are planning new ones ia
case tbs canteea 10 killed. These state
mantx that amass you youngsters 80 much
are honest enough. but the congressman
have been wofuily misied by tha liquor
dealers and the temperance eranks. say
cranks adylsediiy. for ] mean not tenn
perance advocates. but those who cali
themselves such and are really most In
temperate In that they insist upon their
own extreme views"
hut. colonel. what difference win IL
make Il they do abolish the eautecn? We
were forced 10 Introduce II. and as soon
~ the old conditions are restored we will
be forced 10 do so again"
Certainly. boys. hut It's dead loss Of
time. However. Wa won't let things slip
backward. Whatever law is provided,
think II viii 30 enforced sensibty. and
hoTe no harm VIII he done"
Well then. sir. you can afford 80 laugh
~ these sermons. for they ara really great
sport. They're so serious a. 10 be ero-
tesduc and ludicruus. Int hang morals
$50
This proposition was received with en-
thusiasm. and the eues wers coon nj work
As usual the game began tarsseiy. bat soon
walked up until the room rang with mlrth
when some one made an especially unfor-
tunate shut. When the game had become
hilarious, another welcome proposition
was fnsie.
something" TIE button was pressed. but
no steward appeared A second and third
attempt met the same fate. The young
men grew impatient and thirsty. The nd
Jnsaat stuck his head cut 81 the door and
summoned the steward I'm tn. tone tha.
always brought the battalion TO attention
with a strap No steward appeared. The
colonel gave II np. and went home. The
young lieutenant they called Harry
Claimed the hslgty to mix rafting goosi
punch. ard proposed that they make "A
raid on the stewards Wine hsskar. The
raid WAS made. bar the steward had taken
hts keys with him. By this time their
threats were dry from shouting on, tina
door fer the missing servant. and their
thirst was real afsa growing.
'sEairekaF' came a triumphant shout
from the reading ros.n Wild rush dis
covered youth waving the Congressional
Record
.sr7ne tesplssf eantcen.s he shouted I'm
80 down with any other man and bring
up something
Thrcwing their cares around their shout
derr two of the party fastened away and
In a ssu minutes returned wita~a bag III
iesssons ard another ~ sugar II was al
the wicked santecn had except sarsapa-
rita. The civilian behiss the counter Had
apnlcEtxea snd explained tina, he'd have
some heur the next day. lsus they coaiGn,
wait.
The huge punch howl wus placed on
table and aiiea vita Lemonade. rev
rarso OF pool WAS hswua. and all taiHei
IN and sang Benny Ravens" song fal.
bowed song Tire tsawl was essptsssa sSlIad
and ernpsisd again. and the leashsfn bottle
Ypelra around tne table or fell CT upper
the fsoer amid sfoans and cheers.
The chaplain stood outside abe deer with
lts hand On she knce and MA face sad
sni srrsuwfut tie had came 20 look owes
the evening paper. sat turned osfuils
away.
Tue following saoTtalng De appeared al
post headquarters affcr guard mounting
ard asked Scr the eesaussR isag osricsT.
.'Setsnei,s said be. "a sad duty brings
me 30 yua. ere that TeeeF thought wsala
fail uSson wss. I have been proud of Abs
young men 81 tsss gseSs ard 80 their fraee
dem fHasn Wee az All ksusss tsst l must re-
part taat iSst night. Was aAsst &
enter the nsezH ! was sAaSked 20 ossssFxs
Through the nFxa ssaNe that All ias yctiuxes
erse~F= were - NE salIsaEa roen avaunt
she pinch howl AID they wess all asaSsss
Srank"--<ew York SQn.