Omaha daily bee., 1899-12-07

Joke foundries and paragraphers ought, in
justice to a malgned profession, give the
messengers rest and turn their attention
to that which has achieved a record rival
ing the snail. Constitutional aversion to
haste has reached its highest development
in that portion of Uncle Sans transport
service paid by the day A sample of the
lot is the transport Pennsylvania, now in
the Philippines. Recounting recent journey
from Manila to Jola pronounced Olo) a
correspondent of the New York Sun says:
"In the order for the journey of the
transport an absence from Manila of ten
days was contemplated But the Pennsyl-
vania was built in the days when fifty or
sixty pounds was a liberal working allow
all the freight there was at one trip, SO
that she could take her time about it and
not hurry back for the rest. Now when she
is under charter to the government for
something like $500 day, the foresight Of
her builders becomes a matter Of amaze
ment. And voyage in the transport is a
matter of weeks instead of days.
The captain of the ship is a redfaced
fat man, from England originally, aptly
named Broomhead but it isn't so thick that
it can't see that every day of delay means
an additional $500 in the pockets Of the
owners. In command of the recruits on
the southwark voyage was another redfaced
fat man, from Tennessee, by circumstance a
major, by law a gentleman, and by nature
one of the kindliest souls that ever lived.
The accident of birth named him James, but
that did not hide him. He lived to be one
of the few great ones chosen by fate to
read their own obituary notices in the news
papers and to send home to their admiring
friends marked copies of the glowing eulo-
gies. X The accident of early association
named him Cupid, probably because the dis
cerning young men who surrounded him in
the military academy at West Point saw
that it must have been he, in one of his
anterior incarnations, who served as model
when Raphael painted the cherubs and the
Sistine Madonna, just as in his uterior in
carnation he certainly will be a cherub and
sport about in white wings. He worked
with might and main and spared neither
himself nor his one suit of khaki to get the
men in his charge off the ship, and then
when the recruits from Cebu were to go on
board he personally inspected all their
papers to see that all were right, thereby
attesting the accuracy of the printed forms,
many of which he compared, and winning
forever the heart of the skipper, by causing
a delay of two days"
THE Americans have changed things very
much in Jolo, but in no particular more
than in the relations of those inside the
walls to those outside them. Now the
Moros come up to the outposts with as
many arms as they like, and the old block
house that stands just outside the main
south gate is recognized by natives and for
eigners alike as market, where the Moros
in large numbers every day to
sell whatever arms they can to the Ameri-
cans Some Of their weapons are very
curious and the Americans have bought
great many of them for souvenirs of the
place. AS a consequence the price has
gone away up. as in fact every price has
the Americans have touched these
islands. Whenever a steamer drops an
Choir in Jolo bay the word goes out among
the Moros very quickly and Immediately
they flock to the market with all sorts OF
wares The Pennsylvania came to anchor
a little after o'clock on an afternoon when
one of the brothers of the sultan had come
over with some companions from NAHUM,
with General Bates They rode straight
over the hills from the south side of the
island to the north. and when the confer
ence was finished they rode straight back
again. On their homeward way they spread
the news that a new American ship was IL
port, and the next morning there were mora
cenders of arms at the market than could |
get inside the old blockhouse."