Perrysburg journal. (Perrysburg, Wood Co., O. [Ohio]) 186?-1965, 1899-08-18
Consulted beT Relatives
Family mass meeting 10 caIk Over
belen's Future State


n ooNA
Ia could be in her own way, but with
strong tendency to keep the run of
everything and everybody in her
own block and with mania
for including herself in any group
of "relativcs and friends" that
;might be invited to attend any fu-
neral within mile of her own home,
received the following letter from her
sEicce recently;
. Dear Aunt Sue: 1t may surprise you to
hear that want to get married, but know
THAT It will please you TO learn that before
taking such an important step ] mean to
ieonsult you and all my other relatives ana
Lthen be guided by the opinion upon which
.most of you agree.
! You know that there has always been
more or less hard feeling and coolness
,among the folks ever since my sisters Ju-
idith and Emma were married, just because
esveryone was not consulted in ad-
vance. Since Judith married Tom. you
know, Aunt Eunce has hardly spoken
Ito her, and Aunt Eunice's boys
won't even recognize Tom on the
iRtrcet. not because they have
tthing against him. for he is very good
Husband but because they were not con-
quilted. And 1t is just as bad with Emma
Iand Cousin George. He pretends that he
Iiz heart-brokcn because she married VIII
.ltam without first asking him what kind of
IN man William was when she knew all
fAbout II herself.
/ Now. / don't want to cause any more
Fdfssensions in the family. and so propose to
Lhave what you might call II mass meeting
tof all our folks and urge general discus
snfon and then take ballot to see who is
Sthe most suitable man for me TO marry.
kAS I do not propose to have any vote my
ssslf. for fear of hurting some ones feel
ltags. shall preside at the meeting. After
Eealling the meeting to order / shall an
ERounce that ] have received two offers of
Hh;.. :.2S7. cne from young clergyman
snd one from sSnng business man. nam Ineg rney
arc both splendid young men. IT,. IT,, good good
tsos,'iGns pos, s SE9 t. .Hrs wsss PqthS,r an surS
saaughter to pihrrry either Of ihcm, I'll
admit thai prefer one to the other and
lh selt at liberty 10 decide for myself
p-ould not hesitate to make my choice.
However, 1 should not say at the meet
iAg which one / prefer, because know
ishat one OF mothers cousins does not like
sAim.
II have counted up all my relatives on
both sides, and find that in addition to ia
Ether and mother, the four grandparents,
bay brother, two sisters and two brothers.
Etn-law, there are seven aunts. II uncles.
- FIRST cousins 10 second cousins, three
,1reat-aunts and my little niece. So you see
sthat II will be quite mass meeting. /
shall ask all who cannot come to send let
stars expressing in full their opinions and
preferences in the matter. / shall read
these letters aloud at the meeting. which
twill be held next Thursday evening. Your
affectionate niece.
HELEN.
'P. S.-Do YOU know whether John Hud.
dington Is really a cousin of ours. or dc
we call him uncle because the families used
10 be so intimate. He Is living out in Omaha
Jnow, and, of course. couldn't come TO the
Emeeting. but If he Is actually a relative. !
Unjust write to hi>2 and get his opinion by
letter Please answer H."
Z Aunt Sue was delighted with the let.
itcr from Helen. aaG after wriling bacl;
ktEat John Huntington was II sort OF Il
third cousin ard that it wouldn't do any
harm to consult him. and also announc-
Sfng that she would come to the meet.
Eing carly enough for dinner and to have
IA long private talk before the meeting,
sthe spinster lost no time in telling her
sneighbors what sensible niece she had
End that her brother had at least one
daughter who was a credit to the fam.
hly.
The plans for the meeting went off
without hitch, and of the II relatives
INVITED all were present but one aunt
Three uncles, seven cousins and The
little niece. The little niece, Judith's
lchild, was reported as sick with bac
lcold, which caused Eunice to sniff and
Intimate that Judith knew as much
Sabout taking care of baby as She die
inbout whale, and that she had mar
tried the wrong man, anyway. But
;the friction didn't develop and Heller
tgot her mass meeting into parliamen
Itary form without confusion.
"You have all learned, she said, "fron
tyour letters of invitation what the pur
fpose of this family gathering is. fee
livery grateful that so many of you have
sshOwn your interest in my welfare by
seoming here tonight. Before asking TO
fremarks / will read two letters that
ihave received, one from Uncle Joe anC
the other from Cousin Susan. This Il
kthe one from uncle:
! ".My dear Niece: Your strange reques
sEaceived. 1t will be impossible for me I
ATTEND your foolish meeting. but woul'
mot come II could, because II is none o
5uy business-your choice of a husband
s5Baarry the man who lbves you and WHOM
hsou love, and 1t Is my earnest wish tina
10 may be worthy of you. I'll be at tn
bwedding, no matter what other engage
Epasnts have. Congratulating you In ad
vance. am your affectonate
JUNGLE JOE"
Z Murmurs of disapproyal from the as
smbled relatives followed the readinl
sk this first letter. One aunt expressed
er gratitude that Joe wasn't on he
stds of the family, and said that h
Eeyer had amounted to much and nGve