davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07

1--WE must have city directories, and
we must have names to fill 'em up
said the canvasser for the big book
so familiar to all, sbut the getting of
those names has almost become a
work of heroism. You'd think, in the
first place, that every family would
want to be represented, and in the
next that it would only be a minutes
work to get name, but the man who
argues that way had better canvass
for a day. The city directory is as
old as the hills. Canvassers have been
going from house to house once year
for a lifetime, and no one can profess
surprise at their appearance or suspect
them of evil designs. The getting of
names, however, grows harder every
year, and in some quarters the at
tempt has become dangerous. Outside
the business/districts we come in con-
tact only with women. If I were to
call alta house with a solid silver
pitcher in my hand and offer to sell it
fof dollar don't believe I'd be asked
/half as many questions as l am in
pursuing a legitimate business. 1t is
a servant girl who generally opens the
door. | tell her | am taking names
for the city directory She at first
suggests that l call again, but finally
consents to call the mistress. How
easy for the lady to tell me that her
husbands name is John Smith and let
me go my way, but that is not on the
programme.
Well, sir, what is it?' she de-
mands, as she faces me.
81 am getting names for the city
directory
"'Um! We don't care for the book.
But you will not get one, ma am,
simply want your husbands name.
".Then come when he is home
You were living here last year,
maam?'
If we were we paid our rent!'
Sometimes I can convince her
against her will and get the name"
said the canvasser, "but the chances are
that | must make a second call. The
servants and the children are eau
toned not to have anything to say to
a canvasscr, and the directory man is
constantly mixed UP with all sorts OF
agents and has to suffer for it. A
man with business is always prompt
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07

to give his name, but mechanics and
laborers are both careless and ohsti-
nate. In many cases they have left
the neighborhood in debt and don't
want to be traced, and in others they
suspect some sort of a trick. You'll
think it curious, but I've met people
who were superstitious about having
their names in the directory. I've had
dozens of them tell me that it brought
bad luck, and tell tales of misfortune
to prove 1t, and if they gave a name
at all it would be a false one. In
looking over the directory you can't fail
to see the number of widows there
listed. There's trick in that. Among
certain class a woman figures that
she will get work as a widow much
sooner than a married woman. and
that the grocer and butcher win have
more sympathy. Not long ago l met
a stranger who stopped me to ask if
wasn't the man who canvassed his
house for the last directory, and when
replied in the affirmative he indig-
nantly exclaimed:
We'll, my wife told you that she
was widow, and yet you have got
may name there!
But | must have found out that
she wasn't widow" replied
oh ha1 o,
When a woman says she's a widow
that settles it, and it's mighty mean
man who'll go poking around to find
to the contrary! If it wasn't for the
policeman over there I'd put head on
you.'
There's another queer trait of hui
man nature to be found in the direc-
tory, and it is the result of false pride
and novel reading. The mans name
may be Moses or Abner or John. The
wife or daughter thinks it too old fash
Toned, and she makes it NJ. Reginald
Doe, for instance, and feels that she
has boosted the family up several pegs
in the world. Your real widow is also
particular about her given name. If
she belongs to the better class she'll
give it grudgingly, if it's old-fashioned,
like Betsy or Hannah, but in a fiat
house you may look out for something
taken from story of novel. You'll find
Mrs. Britomarte, Blank at the wash
tub, and Mrs. Nina Roe on her knees
with a scrubbing brush, and it isn't
for you to wonder what has become OF
Bridget or Mary. ! know one widow
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07

darker
Down came box of another shade.
This time the search lasted fifteen
minutes. There were ten dozen pairs
of gloves in the box. All were exactly
of the same shade, the same length of
finger and the same number of buttons.
Why two minutes should be taken up
in accepting or rejecting could not
see. There were only three shades Of
tan. When the woman had exhausted
them she suddenly inquired the price.
The reply was that the gloves were
$3.50 per pair.
My soul!" whisperingly exclaimed
it's good thing thought to ask the
price. know of three different places
where I can buy those self-same gloves
for $1.49. Come on
Il led the way out, but soon discover
ed that the woman was not following.
Turning back, found her at the lace
counter. She put in ten minutes pric-
ing different makes, and then went over
to the waist department.
Il don't want waist, of course" she
observed en- route, "but I'll just look
'em over and ask the prices"
The salesgirl exhibited blue, black,
red, brown and all other colors in silk
waists. They ranged in prices from
$2.9S to 500, The bust measures were
from "a to 40. Eack and every waist
was the latest thing out and was being
sold at tremendous sacrifice One
particular waist, which reminded me
of the usual state prison uniform, had
been sold right along at $15.59, but as
it was the last of the lot, and Cuba had
finally been turned over to the United
States, it would be knocked down for
the trifling sum of 1888. The woman
dallied among the waists for twenty
minutes, and just as I had made up my
mind that she was going to buy at
least ten of them she calmly remarked
to the salesgirl:
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07
MY DOUBLE PASSED.

TO fall into the arms Of a detective Just
as ne had tapped me on the shoulder my
double passed US, making for the en-
trance. For a minute I was knocked out
The resemblance was SO close that won-
dered that If 1 mad not suddenly lost my
mind or fallen aslsep. The detective didn't
notice the man, ard didn't wake up until
too late. II seemed that he had been
gambling on the train ana beaten green
horn out of fifty dollars. and wniie l was
in parior ear he was riding on the same
train IN the smoker The victim the
conductor and the brakeman al identified
me. and my double get safely away while
was trying TO Prov that was myself
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07

Eyes, they are perfect darlings and
wonderfully cheap, but l was just look
| ing, yeu know"
| Then we made new start to get
| out of the store, but she stopped to
look at a $4,99 umbrella reduced to
$1.95, to price a shell comb which
hadn't been reduced at all, and to ad-
mire a whisk broom holder which
might once have been cheap at $5.51
less than a quarter. When we finally
got out l found that we had put in
sixty-fve minutes and hadn't hair
pin to show for it. We started for an
other store and the gloves, and as we
passed a shoe store the woman halted
and spent five minutes looking at the
styles in the window. Then she said:
I'VE will go in and see what they
have"
But Go you want shoes?" I asked.
"Of course not, we are out shopping,
aren't WEI"
l thought she might look at three or
four makes of shoes and perhaps buy
pair of slippers, but she calmly took
seat, asked to be waited on at once
and for forty long minutes she kept d
clerk busy. She tried on almost every
style of he kept in stock, but there
was some fault to be found with each
and every one. The very last pair did
seem a perfect fit, and for thirty Sec
ends l believed the woman was almost
tempted to order them home Then
the temptation was put behind her and
we walked out. That is, we walked
out after she had priced three different
styles of slippers, a bicycle shoe and
all the overgaiters in sight When
we finally reached another dry goods
store | should have had some trouble
in entering had l taken the lead l
let the woman go first, and she was a
| good leader. By using her shoulders
and elbows she opened a lane through
the crowd in every direction. Women
We're pushed along, men turned to right
and left, and children had to get under
the counters or be run down. Before
reaching the glove counter the woman
| stopped to inspect some handkerchiefs
at 10 cents apiece, some stockings as
rs cents per pair and some table nap
kins at so cents per dozen. These
goods were cheap only in price. They
had once been sold at such figures that
only millionaires could buy, but owing
to cyclones, cloudbursts, confagrations
and business failures the prices had
been cut down and down until they
were now within reach of the poorest
Il want to look at some pearl-colored
gloves said the woman, as we finally
reached the goal.
But you are after tan-colored," ]
protested.
81 have changed my mind"
Ii was the same thing over again. A
hundred pairs of pearl-colored gloves
all her size, were handed down, but she
couldn't make up her mind to buy, no
even when she learned that the price
was only s1.49. For a time she evi
IDENTIFY struggled with herself as tc
whether she would buy and save thai
cent, or let the gloves go and lose {
tremendous bargain, but she finally
turned away to inspect some untrim
med hats at SO cents each. If the sale:
girl had told the woman that thoss
hats had been marked down from
$3.50 to 80 cents on account of the dis
covery of America or the death O
George Washington, think she would
| have bou&t the whole lot, but no par
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07

would occur before the day was out.
saw the detective enter before any OF you
did. I knew he came Tor me. and you
witnessed my readiness 10 go with HIM -
And what was the charge This timer
was asked.
We'll. my double has gone into counter
felt money" was the reply. ard / finally
have hopes that ne viii be caught and
done for. Yes. he was in town two weeks
ago and passed lot Of the queer. and
the police kept 1t from the papers in hopes
he would return 10 work the field again
There was a detective at the depot 10 ar
rest, but he got TO flirting with pretty
girl and Let me pass unnetlced. The po-
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07


ticular inducements were held out, and
she elbowed her way down the counter
to look at some ostrich tips. Here
was genuine bargain. Owing to the
failure of an ostrich farmer, combined
with the bankruptcy of great Ameri-
can importing house, ostrich tips worth
81 would be sold on this day at q
cents each. The sixteen women who
wanted to buy a hundred tips apiece
were showed into the background, and
for twelve minutes the woman held
the fort and tried to make up her mind
whether to take four dozen or the en-
tire lot. When she appealed to me /
couldn't help her. A circus ostrich
had pecked off and swallowed my cap
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07

lice feel rather fiat because I turned out
to be the wrong man, but IL they only
keep their eyes opan my double VIII tuEn
up sooner or later. Uncle SANS men
will also be on his train. and It WIN be
only a question Of time when ne Will
be driven to fee the country or find him
self behind the bars"
but how do we know that you are tho
right man instead OF the double?" queried
a doubling Thomas.
You don't know" replied the man with
a laugh, as he sauntered off for a night
can
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07

O the grip
The terrbia grlwi
I'm wondering still 4 Rel gst me this trp.
II heH cough ne 70 glory
And finish my story
The grip-the terrible grip!
o TIE GRIP
The terrible Fript
I'm wondering Still II heH founder the
ship!
or sin keep bosy
A-taklng MS "toaLy''-
The grip-tne terrible grip.
o the grip
lAiH.t Ii me for a 'snsp'fe
Be sure thai the hour-the minute don't
ss-p)
I'm almost as &scky
As folks in Kentucky
SO here's 20 the gslp--fo the grf,.
IF. L. Stanton II Atlanta Constitution.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07

once Drisues ike d diminuJiye tomcat
and draws fits head back into the FIRST
ring Of It's body, swelling out tho red
edge Of these rings like fighting
cock.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-05-07
A WARLIKE WORM.

This odd little animal, known as the
caterpillar OF the puss moth, as soon
as II scents the approach of danger at
The true northerner., 1899-11-08
MattaWan.

Mr.. and Mrs. A. II. Campbell were in
Bangor, Thursday.
After averal days of serious illness,
Miss. Ella Brewer is now convalescent.
w. H. Glidden's folks are now city peo-
pie. They occupy the Boynton house.
Fred Murch is home, having closed a
successful season sailing on the lakes.
Miss Fannie Bockius spent Saturday
and Sunday with friends in Hammond,
Ind.
Ernest Cook has sold his personal pro
perty and has gone to join his wife in
England.
The M. E. social held last Tuesday was
fairly we'll attended and an enjoyable
evening was passed.
The w. Fl. M. u. meets with Mrs. Scott
Glidden, Thursday of this week. Dinner
will be served by section "a"
The ladies of Van Buren, hive will give
a chicken pie social in K. O. L. Nj. hall,
Tuesday evening, November IA. An early
supper will be served.
The snow storm of last Friday and
scarcity of cars makes the sugar beet
growers feel anxious a.out harvesting
and marketing the crop.
James j. Mcdonald, deputy X. o. y NJ.
commander, was at the regular review
held last Wednesday evening. A men,
Der getting contest was inaugurated.
Chas. Hubbard has moved his house
hold goods here and will move into the
place now occupied by Mr.. Van Patten.
Mr.. Hubbard has purchased the prop
erty.
Last Friday afternoon the scholars in
in Miss Orrs room debated on the topic,
Resolved, that it is better to receive in
structions privately than in a class" +"
The affirmative won.
A decided shortage in cars is making
life burden to the grain and produce
buyers. Less yachts and more cars by
the Vanderbilts, would be appreciated
by the patrons of the road
On Friday evening of this week the
G.. Il. society will give an oyster supper
and social in K O. L. NJ hall. Supper
will be served at o'clock at the nominal
fee of 10 cents. A program is being ar
ranged a part of which will be, reasons
given for not marrying" by IA bachelors
and old maids. Possibly some interest
ing information may be gathered if they
tell the TRUTH
The true northerner., 1899-11-08

Miss Lizzie Sweet is home from Hart
ford.
Seldom Baxter has been home from
Holland on visit.
Mrs. VIM. Baxter is in Kalamazoo,
caring for sick lady.
Rev. Ketchum and wife of South Ha-
ven have been visiting in town.
Sweet & Leader are doing mason
work at Bloomingdale this week.
Mr.. and Mrs. Roy Perkins of Bloom
ingdale were in town over Sunday.
G. d. Myers returned from Kalama-
zoo, Thursday afternoon, much improved
and is attending to business again.
Miss Lois Daratt left Monday night
for New York state, where she will con-
tinue making her home with Rev. and
Mrs. G. b. Hart
John Butts died at his home south
east of this village very suddenly last
Thursday. He was at the creamery in
this place during the day with milk, but
was taken sick before reaching home in
the evening and died a few hours later.
The funeral was held Sunday.
The true northerner., 1899-11-08
300 Reward, 300.

The readers of this paper will be pleas
ed to learn that there is at least one
dreaded disease that science has been
able to cure in all its stages, and that is
catarrh. Halls Catarrh Cure is the on
ly positive cure known TO the medical
fraternity. Catarrh being a constitution
al disease, requires constitutional treat
ment. Halls Catarrh Cure is taken inter
nally and acts directly upon the blood
and mucous surfaces of the system, there
by destroying the foundation of the dis
ease, and giving the patient strength by
building up the constitution and assist
ing nature in doing its work. The pro
prietors have so much faith in its cura-
tive powers, that they offer One Hundred
Dollars for any case it fails to cure.
Send for list of testimonials. Address
+. j. CHENEY a. CO, Toledo, ..
Sold by druggists, price Toe.
Halls Family Pills are the best. m
The true northerner., 1899-11-08
Decatur.

Birney Mead has gone to Kalamazoo
county to work.
Henry Hinkley of Berlamont was in
town last week.
Mr.. and Mrs. Frank White have re-
turned from Louisville, Kentucky.
Mr.. and Mrs. Eugene Rouse of Dowag
lac spent Sunday with l. S. Dewey and
wife.
Morris Hamlin has gone to Eaton
Rapids for short visit with his brother
and sister.
Will Hamlin returned last week from
Idaho. He expects to spend the winter
in Arkansas.
d. w. Brodhead has completed his
seasons work at Pearl and returned with
his family to Decatur.
Mrs. Lena Percy and daughter of Bat
tie Creek were guests at the home of w.
w. Greenman, Sunday.
Miss Florence Hawks, who has been
visiting in Decatur the past week, re-
turned to her home in Galesburg, Tues
day.
Mrs w. II Clark, who has been very
, sick at the home of her sister, Mrs. M. G..
Griswold at Evanston, Ills, is simproving.
Mr.. Clark spent Sunday with her.
Married, Sunday evening, November
5, at the NJ r. parsonage, Decatur, by
Rev. A. n. Eldred, Loren r. Smith and
Meta u. Deming, both of Paw Paw.
Emory and Miss Inez Bishop of Eaton
Rapids have come to Decatur to make
their home with their brother, Superin
tendent Bishop. They will attend school.
Alden Horten and wife have returned
TO Decatur from Galien. Mr.. Horton
was obliged to give up his position in the
telegraph Office on account of i'll health.
Abram Norwood of this village and
Mrs Melissa Barrett of Hamilton town
ship were united in marriage at the
Methodist parsonage by Rev. A. N. Ell
dred, Saturday evening, November 4.
II. T. Creagan has purchased the liv-
ery and feed barn of w. III. Conway and
->.t5e& possession the first of the week.
Mr.Ssreagsn will also practice his pro-
fessioiI si veterinary surgeon. His office
will be at the barn opposite the post
Office.
The true northerner., 1899-11-08
A Budding Genius.

Speaking Of budding geniuses," re-
marked the editor of a New York paper
of the illustrated variety, III have one
in my employ as a typewriter and
office factotum who will some day be
really great. l can't say whether he
will attain greatness as a statesman
or a burglar, or filibuster, or an an
archst. but he'll get there somehow,
and In order that you may keep tab on
him l will say that his name is Hiro-
mis-Hiromis Henry Lee. How he got
Hiromis / do not know. but l suspect
that he did it as he does other things.
He is about II years old, and is smart
enough to have graduated at a pretty
fair sort of college. AS sample OF
the kind or genius he is, let me cite on
instance or two Of his methods.
mot long ago. in looking over his
copy of letter had dictated. found
that he had written 'yeaterday' for
yesterday an easy mistake to make,
seeing that the "a and s. are side by
side on the keyboard. | called his at
tention TO ii and suggested that he had
better learn to spell. There's nothing
much the matter with that said he,
glancing over IL indifferently Nor
said /, with some sarcasm. No. said
he. Yea means the same thing as yes,
doesn't it?' / had to admit that il did,
though made him write II over again.
Another time h ID occasion to use the
Latin word for man servant. l knew
that 'ancilla' was the word for maid
servant, but had lost the masculine
l appealed to Hiromis. 'Ancilla,' said
1, being the Latin for maid servant,
what would the word for man servant
be, do you thinkY You see, 1 wanted
to approach him gradually, for 1 felt
the need of impressing him. 'Um,'
said he, scratching his head, did you
say ancilla was the word for maid
servantT Yes said 1. Well said
he, IL ancilla'-putting the accent on
the 'an'-'is the word for maid servant.
l should say that Johncilla or Jimcilla.
or perhaps Dicksilla, ought to be the
word for man servant He never
smiled and 1 didn't, but I sent him
out after a lexicon.
"One more and 1 am done. L had
been trying to get photographs OF odd
things, kind Of a freak show exhibit,
you know, and Hiromis was much In
terested. as he had two or three cou-
sins who were amateur cameraists.
At various times they sent In by him
a basketful OF photographs, but they
were not TO the point at all, and when
l turned down the last batch that he
presented told him TO get odd things.
something, for instance, with two
heads to it. Can you tell me just
whatr he asked. No. said |. desper-
ately; get a photograph of any two
headed thing you can find and I'll pay
so cents extra for it. Hiromis smiled
softly and went away. 1t was Satur-
day and Monday morning he came I'm
to my desk, still smiling, and laid a
photograph down before me. / looked
at ii a second and looked at Hiromis.
Then | handed him so cents. He had
brought me in a photograph Of a bar
rel."-Washington Star.
The true northerner., 1899-11-08

nut was Promptly Fined and Run Out
Of the Town.

when I graduated from the law
school," said the old lawyer, II took
Horace Greeley's advice md went
west. I located In a little town that
then was on the frontier. and waited
with the confidence Of youth for cli-
ents.
Before had fairly opened my Of
fee / was retained to defend a man
for stealing a horse. This elated me
very much, for / was not aware at
the time that the case had been re-
fused by all the other lawyers la town,
as defending a horse thief was not
thing TO be desired II man valued
his life.
"The case came to trial before an
old judge and a jury composed OF be-
whiskered ranchers. There was no
doubt that the man was guilty, but he
had number of friends who were
willing to swear to anything, and l
thought that it was my duty to make
the best possible use Of them. They
were all willing to swear that the de-
fendant was forty miles away from
the spot when the horse was stolen,
and the prosecution was unable to
break down their testimony. l saw
that l was going to free my client, so
it was with a satisfied air that / saw
the jury leaving the room to prepare
their verdict.
They were back in five minutes,
and the old judge asked them II they
had succeeded In arriving at a verdict.
1--WE hev.' answered the foreman,
as he shifted the gun he carried on his
hip. We find the defendant not
guilty, an recommend the defend
ants lawyer, OWN to his youth an
innocence, to the mercy Of the court
"While I was gasping for breath
the judge fined me $500. and suspend
ed sentence long enough for me to get
out of town. 1t wasn't law, but l
didn't stop to argue the matter. New
York Sun.
The true northerner., 1899-11-08
Six Frightful Failures.

Six terrible failures of six different
doctors nearly sent VIM. l.. Mullen of
Lockland, o., to an early grave; all said
he had fatal lung trouble and that he
must soon die, but he was urged to try
DIR. Kings New Discovery for Consump-
ton. After taking five bottles he was
entirely cured. 1t is positively guaran-
teed to cure all diseases of the throat,
chest and lungs, including coughs, colds,
la grippe, pneumonia, bronchitis, asthma,
hay fever, Group, whooping cough; SOC.
and 81. Trial bottles free at Longwell
Bros. drug store. m
The true northerner., 1899-11-08
Brave Explorers

Like Stanley and Livingstone, found it
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and typhoid disease germs than savage
cannibals: but thousands have found
that Electric Bitters is wonderful cure
for all malarial diseases. If you have
chills with fever, aches in the back of
the neck and head, tired, wornout feeling
a trial will convince you of their merit.
w. A. Null of Webb, H., writes: "My
children suffered for more than a year
with chills and fever; then two bottles OF
Electric Bitters cured them" Only SOC.
Try them. Guaranteed. Sold by Long
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