davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

One great consolation Is peculiarly
the humorIs,s-he Isn't supposed tc
laugh ct his productions.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

Tho only way for an entertainer to
he sure Of applause Is to arrange be-
foreliand to pay for It afterward,
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05
How lie oct tter,

ibid her father throw you OUT.
NO: u was her great. EEr4I.Er,.,.
grandfather"
Ties dead and gone long ago"
"S-H. but she has just discovered 4,
was q Evolutionary hero OF sufn5 EIrI
and that decided her not TO marry n =
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

There is much difference between
Boosting OF sickness and glorying in
wounds.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

Many a man who would shrink from
taking purse for profit will steal a
character for pleasure.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

The eagle on the silver dollar Is
merely to remind US that riches have
wings.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

The same flre that makes the dross
evident. purses the gold.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

Few girls practice economy as faith
fully as they do the piano.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

Character is the only reliable certin-
cate issued by the school Of life.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

The average man is polite to lot Of
other men he would rather kick.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

send my typewriter EiFl IN h--y.
Jimmy" ~ daar-nt lnteFFupt ~ -.
she's t-sdiH' a letter from krF t,ssg &"
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05
TO CURE a coLp ~ ONE DAY

Take Laxative .iirusno slininr Tahse.G A.
druggists refund the tana-y II li fails % rs.-'
20. The svEuisa has l. u . % sses l..af.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

Nickel trimmings on stove are .
source of much heat-to some people.
Rocky Ford enterprise., 1899-10-05

The stage prompter might be appro-
priately termed q theatrical poster.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

All was excitement at the scene of
the supposed fire on High street. The
uproar of the changing engines drew
the usual crowd of curious people, who
were greatly disappointed because the
fire turned out to be nothing more Sc
rious than the angry sputter;ng of an
overworked chimney. The lady of
the house was, nevertheless, almost
hysterical with excitement as she re-
lated to group of sympathizers the
details of the stirring episode.
1.-The first thing L thought Of" she
painted, twas my bicycle and-ard-I
rushed for that. Then 1 thought OF
my new dress, and | was bound to save
that. SO ran upstairs and secured
it. OF course there were many other
things of value, but if the house had
burned, would have been satisfied
that had saved two of my most pre-.
cious possessions.
"But what about your baby?" asked
one of the ladies', in surprise.
"Oh, dear me, L had forgotten all
about the baby! 1 wonder if the
little darling is awake" And the ex
cited woman bounded up the stairs al
rapid transit rate.
"Well," remarked one of her neigh.
bors, "seems to me Mrs. - is ter
ribly absent-minded. Detroit Free
Press.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
A son OF JUPITER.
ALFRED VANDERBILT INHERlrS
62,5oo.ooo.
Never Did a Hard Days Work In Els
Life, But Managed to Please His
Father-His Brother Gets Only
PaItry S12,OOO,OOO.

Alfred Gwynne Vanderbilt inherits
the bulk of the property left by Cor
nelius Vanderbilt, Sr. Alfred Gwynne
will Inherit one-half of the paternal
millions, while his mother and his four
brothers and sisters will share equally
what remains. Estimating the value
of the estate at $125 1000, Alfred
Gwynne will get $62,50o,OOO. Poor Cor
nelius. Jr., will get only $l2,5O0,-
600. This seems big enough to the eyes
of ordinary mortals, but many things
tend to make it small in the eyes of
Cornelius, Jr. Prior to his rupture
with his father some two years ago,
when cupid led him captive by the
forelock and made him Indifferent to
consequences, Cornelius, Jr.. was
looked upon as his fathers legitimate
successor in charge Of the vast estate.
Indeed be was specially trained to meet
this responsibility. But fate decreed
otherwise. However. he will not
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

starve on $12, 100000. This will easily
support him until he can get some
thing to do. Alfred Gwynne is the
second son of Cornelius, Sr. He gradu-
ated from Yale college in June last.
Speaking of him one of the most inti
mate friends of the family says AL
fred Gwynne never gave his father one
single moment of serious uneasiness.
He has been an average boy of the
best sort. Throughout his college ca
reer at Yale he was universally popu
lar. He spent money freely, but he
was never ostentatious. He was not
trained like Cornelius, Jr., to assume
the responsibility of managing the
estate. Very likely Mr.. Vanderbilt re-
Trained purposely from imposing this
burden upon his light-hearted son
whose spirits seemed at variance with
business restraints, while those of Cor
nelius Jr., seemed to invite them. AL
fred Gwynne is thoroughly democratic.
In personal appearance he is tall, dark
and slender. He has graceful, easy
manner and charming brown eyes. He
likes to enjoy himself. Those who
know him say that he would much
rather that his brother, to whom he is
very devoted, should receive the great
est part of the millions, with the re-
sponsibility they entail. But there is
no telling how responsibility may de-
velop him. There is wonderful stuff
in the Vanderbilts.
Besides the original will there are
said to be two copies. One is in the
hands of Mrs. Vanderbilt and the 9TH
er Cornelius Vanderbilt has. Henry B.
Anderson, the lawyer, has the original.
The war revenue tax on the estate will
be about $2,OO0,000. All estate above
81 100000 must pay revenue of 2R
per cent. Comptroller Coler of New
York will collect the state inheritance
tax, which amounts to S1,0O0,000. This
is the largest tax ever paid by any
estate. The surrogate will appoint an
appraiser as in the case of Jay Gould's S
| fortune. There can be no division of
| the estate until the taxes are paid.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

There is always something interest
ing in the discovery, or even the sup
posed discovery, of new malady.
The race reioices in nothing so much
as i'll talking about its physical disa-
bilities. We have a long succession
OF troubles in connection with the
bicycle. 1t is only natural that the
new rival of the wheel should keep
in the swim and produce its own
peculiar troubles. A piece of dialogue
in the Automobile Magazine shows
that the expected has happened. A
young woman is the subject of the
conversation "'Puts on good many
airs, said one neighbor to another, as
they walked home after the rapidly
disappearing automobile. You d
think that she invented the horseless
carriage and owned the only one in
use, instead of taking few rides by
special invitation. And did YOU
notice that she's getting the automo.
bile face? Il noticed she looked
kind of queer. Yes proud and
pulled up, as if she were somebod,
better'n any other woman. That
the way they all look, 4"
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

Geot ge Dewey may have begun TO
be hero late in life, as he says, but
he is real hero, because he is so
human, observes the New York Sun.
We know from his manner of speech,
his sympathies, his liberation, his
brave natural carriage and the bold
but gentle light of his eyes that he
must have been the same Dewey
all his life that he is today. The man
was always ready for the opportunity
to be great, but it did not come to him
until the first of May, 1898. 1t has
probably puzzled him to find that he
has grown so famous, and that III the
estimation of the world lie is to take
his place among its great men for all
time-puzzled him because he is so
modest and so incapable OF being
anything but the plain, unaffected
character whose worth his friends,
aud whose great qualities his brother
officers, have known all along.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

There has been no relaxation of the
demand for fractional silver. and the
situation. according to treasury Off
cials, is likely to get worse rather
than better. All the uncurrent and de-
faced coins have now been coined up,
and the treasury is at the end Of its
resources. When Secretary Gage took
hold in March 1897 he had SIG
900 in subsidiary coin. That sum has
steadily declined until now there is
less than $3,00O,000 in the possession
of the treasury, and this a. scattered
over the country. The demand for
small coins continues from ali sec
tions. and there has been found no au-
thority of law to purchase bullion to
supply the demand. The secretary last
year suggested to congress that he be
given authority to use the seigniorage
for subsidiary coinage, but the only
response was TO direct the coinage OF
all this seigniorage into silver dollars
There will be a scarcity of small
change until congress acts
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

The old fashioned toy house that
told us it was going to be fair because
the woman came out of the house,
and that it was going to be stormy
because the man stood to the front,
gave us the natural idea of the wife's
and the husbands place. In matters
fair and gentle and domestic the wife
Is properly the head; in stormy, stern,
and especially in out-of-doors affairs,
the husband is the best head of the
house, or his wife is unfortunate.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

Our bill for ammunition during the
Spanish war was not ne-ffth as great
IS the amount expended annually
by the British navy in practice
Torty-fiye thousand dollars worth of
ammunition was fired at Montoio's 5
seet in Manila Bay and 500, 900 was
expended in following up and destroy,
ing Cervera's fleet. Each round fired
by Dewey cost about So. 80 and the
average price Of the rounds fred by
Sampson was $14.25. These prices
Indicate the prepouderance in the
tights of small calibre guns.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
"Three cheersi HurraI hurrai

~ ohNoiS 81 huTInb null ~
hurra!"
They caught up the exhausted child
fiinging him from burly shoulder to
shoulder, striving with each other for
the honor of bearing him, and so, in
irregular, tumultuous, triumphal pro-
cession they brought him back to the
depot and set him down among them.
Pass the hat, pards!' cried one.
1t had been pay day, and the saved
engineer and fireman dropped in each
their months wages. Not hand in
all the throng that did not delve into
a pocket. There was the crisp rustic
of bills, the chink of gold and silver
coin.
"Out with your ndkerchief, Joe!
Your hands won't hold it ALL Why,
young one-What?-what's the mat.
ter?"
For the boy with scarlet cheeks and
burning eyes had clenched both small
hands behind his back-the poor,
twisted back laden with its burden OF
deformity and pain.
'No! MOI" he cried in shrill, high
voice. Don't pay me! Can't you see
what it's worth to me, cnce-iust once
in all my life-to be of little USE
like other folks?"
The superintendent had come from
his office. He had laid his hand on
the boys head.
"Joe," he said, "we couldn't pay
you if we wished. Money doesn't pay
for lives But you have saved us a
great mary dollars besides. Won't
you let US do something for you?"
"You can't! You can't Nobody
can!" The child's voice was almost a
shrek. 1t seemed to rend the air
with the pent-up agony of years.
''There's only one thing in the world
! want, and nobody can give me that.
Nobody can ever make me anything
but Crooked Joel"
The superintendent lifted him and
held him against his own breast.
"My boy" he said in his firm, gem
tie tones, "you are right None of us
can do that for you. But you can do
it for yourself. Listen to me! Where
is the quick train God gave you and
lue brave neufJ! NOC IN tnat Dent
back OF yours-that has nothing to do
with them. Let US help you to a
chance-only chance to work and to
learn--and it will rest with yourself,
to say whether in twenty years from
now, if you are alive, if you are
Crooked joe or Mr. Joseph Bryant"
Visiting in c. not long ago a
friend said to me.
Court is in session. You must go
with me and hear Bryan"
The court room was crowded, at
our entrance, with an expectant audi
ence. When the brilliant young at
torney rose to make his plea noticed,
with a shock of surprise, that his
noble head surmounted an understood
and mis- shapen body. He had spoken
but five minutes, however, when L
had utterly forgotten the physical de-
feet; in ten minutes L was eagerly in
terested, and thereafter, during the
twohours' speech, held spell-bound
by the marvellous eloquence which is
fast raising him to the leadership of
his profession in his native city.
ga wonderful mani" said my friend,
as we walked slowly homeward. Then
he told me the story of "Crooked
Joe. San Francisco Report.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

appreciative people. frame the poems
and hang them in their parlors. 1t Is
strange how practice makes perfect.
Before l went into this undertaking
business | thought it was very difficult
to write poetry. Now l can write an
eiGht-stanza poem of the dollar
grade in two hours. First
get my rhymes-grieve, dove, 3e-
reave, love-something like that,
you know, and then all have to do is
to fill in. If business ever gets slack
I'll take to writing poetry for the mag
azines, but | guess they don't pay as
much as I'm accustomed to getting"
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

The present idol of the British pub
lie is Prince Edward of York eldest
son of the duke of York, grandson OF
the prince of Wales, great-grandson OF
Queen Victoria, and heir in the direct
line of the crown of Great Britain.
Prince Edward, having been born on
June 23, 1894, is now well into his sixth
year, and regards himself as quite a
big boy. His brother Albert is a year
younger, and the two princes have had,
perhaps, their share, but no more, of
brotherly SCRAPS" The duke Of York
is said not to have interfered with their
small wars, saying to "let them fight
it out will make them better men,"
But he has interfered successfully wIlh
another weakness OF Prince Edward.
1t Is customary for the royal children,
in meeting the queen. to kiss her hand
and not her cheek: but Prince Edward
did not like to do this. and Objected
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
SIMPSONS SUCCESSOR.

Rear Admiral Farguhar has succeed
ed Rear Admiral Sampson in command
of the North Atlantic squadron. On
account of his years, which though not
greatly advanced are verging upon that
period when men naturally desire to
withdraw from the busy turmoils of
life and to enjoy what time remains
before them in comparative quietude,
Admiral Sampson asked to be assigned
to duty on shore; and in Difference to
his wishes, backed by his service in
tho late war. this request has been
granted by the naval authorities. Ad-
miral Farguhar, who is scheduled to
succeed Admiral Sampson, comes Of
good fighting stock and if the past is
any Indication of the future. he will
prove himself abundantly worthy Of
the promotion. He entered the navy
some thirty-odd years ago and served
with distinction in the war between
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
UNDERTAKER'S RHYMES.
Novel Feature Introduced by Man In
Pennsylvnnia.

"The incest part of my business" a
Manayunk undertaken said the other
day, according to the Philadelphia
Record, sis the writing of poems for
my patrons-dirges. don't you know,
lamenting the death of the departed.
Maybe you have seen some of my stuff
In the obituary columns. l charge 81
per stanza of four lines If the first and
third and the second and fourth lines
all rhyme. Besides appearing in the
papers, my works are printed usually
on sheets of paper about the size Of
concert programmes. with broad
mourning lines inclosing the print, and
copies are sent to all the friends of the
family. The recipients, il they are truly
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
A Coal and Iron Center.

Birmingham, Ala, is built on a
foundation of limestone. Its southern
limits touch range of hills which are
filed with iron ore. On the north
lies another ridge containing i'm
mense deposits of coal. Nowhere
else, it is claimed, are the three es.
sentials for the manufacture of iron
and steel found so close together. As
a consequence, Birmingham is one of
the greatest producers of iron and
steel in the world A new steel mill
to cost $1,000, 900, and rod, wire
and nail mill to cost 1000, 900 are
low in process of erection. Birming-
ham makes pig iron at II cost of Sc u
ton and basic steel at an additional
cost OF from SO to So a ton. Because
OF the low cost Of production its mills
send more pig iron to foreign coun-
tries than all the rest OF the United
States put together. During the first
six months OF 1898 Birmingham s
shipments to foreign ports amounted
to 9S, 600 tons of pig iron, in addition
to 5000 tons of cast iron pipe. For
eign trade for 1899 will show an in.
crease of more than thirty-three per
cent. over the previous year.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

strenuously. One day he heard some
one speak OF her majesty" 81 know
who her majesty is,'' said he; Its
just granny" "And who was the
naughty little prince who would not
kiss granny's hand?" THAT was me-"
said Prince Edward, unabashed; "and
I'm not going to kiss granny's hand"
But when he had arrived at the age OF
S. he felt himself quite a man. and
began to 90 as other men did-kissed
the queen hand and always doffed his
cap in her presence.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
Two Kinds of Sickrooms.'

DR.. Emily Blackwell, one of the
pioneers of her sex in medicine, heard
a young physician deliver fierce di-
atribe against. opening the doors OF
the profession to women. When he
ceased she asked: "Will you please
tell me one reason why they should
not practice medicine?"
Certainly, madam; they haven't
the muscle, the Drawn, the physical
strength"
81 see, sir. Your conception of a
sickroom is slaughter house; nina
is not. "-Philadelphia Saturday Even
ing Post.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

In the Island of New Britain a man
must not speak to his mother-inlaw. /.
Not only is speech forbidden to his
relative, but she must be avoided
and if by chance the lady is met the
son-in-law must hide himself or cover
kis face. Boston Herald
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
THE REWARD THAT is WAITING.

Success 10 In waiting somewhere
For the man who keeps pegging away;
Who strives In foul weather and fair
Shall meet her, all smiling some day
Some day the reward that he Graves shall
be won
II the world deigns to notice before he is
done.
The way lies direct to the goal
For him who keeps doing his part
With faith ever fresh in his soul
And hope ever high in his heart;
The reward of his worth shall be granted
some day
II 1t isn't too late when the world looks his
way.
IS. E. Ktser, in Chicago Times Herald.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
The Word Won Him.

Sprockett - Wheeler seems to be
stuck on that new doctor Of his. Skor.
cha-Yes, he likes his up-to-dateness.
When Wheeler was sick in bed the first
thing the doctor said was: 20! Wen
have you on pedals again in a few
,laus Catholic Standard and TtmeA
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11

the states. Since that time he has ad-
vanced rapidly from one post of honor
to another. In 1896 he was commander
of the Newark His shore assignments
have included stations at the Boston
navy yard, the League Island navy
yard and the Norfolk navy yard. "He
was commissioned rear admiral on
March last.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
CAUSES OF NIGHTMARE.

Nightmares are similarly suggest
ed by fatigue, changes in circulation,
hunger, thirst, and especially by indi-
gestion, when gases of the stomach
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
EFFECTS OF SMELL AND TASTE.

EFFECTS OF SMELL AND TASTE.
"Likewise with the sense of smell.
l heard of a physician who when re-
quired to spend the night at the ill
melting house of a cheesemonger
dreamed he was sealed up in an in.-
mense cheese, where an army of rats
were running over his body.
'Taste will act similarly. Former
Surgeon-General Hammond tells of a
young woman who put aloes on her
thumb to cure her baby habit of suck
ing that member. She dreamed that
she crossed the ocean in vessel of
wormwood and that she tasted its bit
terness whenever eating or drinking
In Europe, she imagined physician
treated her with OK gall, and the Pope
ordered her to eat piece of Lots
wife turned to salt, from whom she
broke thumb, which she put to her
mouth. When she awoke she was
sucking her own thumb, and all of the
sloes had disappeared.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-12-11
kittIa Joe Bryan.
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES

THE older yard men told the
story even yet-how young
4 Michael Bryan, as straight
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1899-08-23
The Southern Railway Depots

The Southern Railway evidently means to
make strong pull for the business of Sum-
ter and it is going about it in the right way.
Work has been commenced on the freight
depot, and as soon aa all the material arrives
large force OF bsGds will be employe !.
The freight depot viii be handsome build
ing $50 Z 40 feet. Red pressed brick will
be the material. used std TIE joints will be
finished with red cement. The plans have
been drawn so that the depot may be en-
larged at any tine that tie business demands
more room. The side tracks to the depot are
being laid and a temporary spur is also being
put il to provide greater conveoiecce for
handling freight that is received before the
depot is completed. The passenger depot
will be commenced at an early day and will
be completed as quickly as possible. 1t will
be well appointed building, amply large to
accom- nodate all toe busineee the road will
receive.
The passenger trains will ee put on on
September 4th, and convenient schedules
will be operated The tine card will be
iesued shortly.
At present the Southern IS operating two
freight trains daily and the service is as qaick
and satisfactory as could be desired. The
tine required for freight to reach the city
from New York is three to four days.
Freight shipped from New York on the 18th
was received yesterday, which is quick
enough to satisfy almost anybody. except
those who would like to have goods sent BY
telegraph free of charge.
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1899-08-23
RELIGIOUS.

The Youog Men Christian Association
has teacered the use of the association hall to
the Magnolia Street Methodist Church during
the heated term and their very kind and
appreciated cffer has heen accepted. The
congregations at the services of this church
have ontgrown the size of the Mission Chapel
and for sometime past the building has not been
large enough to accommodate those who have
desired to attend services at the church.
Arrangements are now being made to com,
mence the erection of new house Of wor-
ship and in the meantime the Sunday morn
ing and night services will be held in the
Y. NJ. C. A. Hall. The Sunday School and
prayer meeting services will continue TO be
held in the Mission Chapel Services will be
hello in the Y NC A. Hall on Sunday rex,
at IL 80 a. m ;, and $50 p. N. Preaching by
the pastor, Rev. W. Aiken Kelly. A cordial
invitation is extended to the public to unite
in these services
The watchman and southron. [volume] (Sumter, S.C.) 1881-1930, 1899-08-23

About one month ago my child, which is
fifteen months old, bad an attack of diarrhoea
accompanied by vomiting. l gave it such
remedies as are usually given IN such cases,
but as nothing gave relief we sent for ply
sician and it was under his care for week.
At this time the child had been sick for about
ten days snd was barring about twenty-five
operations of the bowels every twelve hours,
and we were convinced that unless it soon
obtained relief it would not live. Chamber
laiu's Colo, Cholera and Diarrhoea Remedy
was recommended, and decided to try it, I
soon noticed change for the better : by its
continued nee complete cure was brought
about, and it is now perfectly healthy
L. Bogg, Stumptown, Giimer Co., W. Va.
For sale by A. J China.