Burlington weekly free press. [volume] (Burlington, Vt.) 1866-1928, 1899-08-03
BOTH COULD TALK.
AND BOTH OF THEM DID TALK TO
SOME EXTENT.
which Led 60 n sudden md UnpIcns-
ant Termination OF, the Converse
ton In which both Takers Had
Been Speaking mt Cross Purposes.

ton In which Both Takers Had
Been Speaking mt Cross Purposes.
as this Mr.. Gwiliams?' inquired the
caller, a Snug parsonage of self possess
ed bearing and businesslike aspect, adj
dressing himself to the somewhat angu-
lar elongated man seated at the roll
topped desk
yes, sir"
"Glad to know. you, Mr.. Civilians. My
name is Scorjel-Godfrcy Scorjel. | see
you are busy, and | am not the man to
take up another mans time without some
good reason for it. Are you carrying all
the life insurance you want, Mr.. CIVIL
liams?'
ayes, sir"
Eyes? | represent the Unpuncturahle
Mutual Life association a company, Mr..
Civilians, that combines the liability of
the old line insurance organizations with
the economy Of the fraternal insurance
orders. 1t guarantees to furnish abso-
lutely reliable protection at actual cost.
We pay no fancy salaries, Mr.. CIVIL
liams. The officers Of the Unpunctura-
BILE, Mr.. Civilians
"Your family well, Mr.. Scorjel?"
"Oh, yes, thanks! AS l said, we fur
nish the best insurance at actual cost.
What is your age. Mr.. Gwlliams?"
"My age? Well, suppose you put it
down at So"
Him, | should have guessed you were
considerably over that. However, on the
basis of-let me see-here it is-at 80 it
would cost you, on each $1,000 only
$3.50, Mr.. Civilians. Figuring on the
basis of-of 10, let us say, it would cost
only S17.SS year or a little over $50
year on $1,000 | defy the world, Mr..
Civilians to equal those figures
"Do you belong to any chureir, Mr..
Scorjel?"
mo, | am not exactly a member. l
attend church pretty regularly, though.
T ] believe in churches and all that, Of
course. I've taken the applications of
hundreds of church members. In fact,
the Unpuncturabe almost makes spe-
cialty, you might Say, of insuring that
kind Of people. 1t pays bigger dividends,
Mr.. Civilians. than any company
what is your first name, MIR. Scorjel"
Godfrey"
ooh, yes / remember. Ever in Nc
Connellsvile or
IL never was. Now
Handsome old town. Some of the
best people have ever known came
the chapce, Mr.. Scorjel you must visit
McConnelsville, without fail"
"Ycs; | certainly will. How much life
insurance did you say you were carry
ing, Mr.. Gwlliams"
II didn't say, Mr.. Scorjel. | said I
was carrying all the lie insurance l
wanted to carry, Mr.. Scorje BY the
way, Mr.. Scorje, did you ever take up
oxygen as special studyF
II can't say | ever did"
Its a wonderfully fascinating subject.
The air we breathe, Mr.. Scorjel as you
may be aware, is composed of about II
parts oxygen and 10 parts hydrogen.
With every breath you draw you cause
rhe air to lose about per cent of its
oxygen. If we suppose you breathe 70
cubic inches of air at each inspiration
and breathe IS times a minute, you
cause 46S cubic inches of air to pass
through your lungs every minute, and in
an hour you vitiate-let me figure little
you vitatc, Mr.. Scorje, quantity Of
air equal to-
at wouldn't take me two minutes, Mr..
Civilians, to-
"But passing by the mere question of
figures, Mr.. Scorjcl, let us consider oxy-
gen in its relation to the blood. The oxy-
gen is taken up by the lungs and carried
off in the arterial circulation, impartng
to the blood in the process the bright red
color
Now, there's no use Of your trying to
have fun with me, Mr.. Civilians
Il don't like to mention it, Mr.. Scorjel,
but you have been chewing wooden
toothpck ever since you came in. | may
be unduly fastdious, but the habit Of
tends me- a man who goes around
chewing n Observation-Disclosures; you look
better now-wll run his arm behind a
girls elbow and grab her hand in his
as he walks along the street with her.
Then, | suppose, Mr.. Civilians, it's
no use to-
Not the least in the world, Mr.. Scor-
jel. The girl doesn't need to be sup
ported in that manner
Think you're smart, don't you. Mr..
Gwillams''-
beg pardon, Mr.. Scorjel, but If you
interrupt me in this way how can | tell
you what | think of man who wipes
his face with his handkerchief and then
looks at the handkerchief to see the re-
suit
What kind OF n blamed old
That's right, Mr.. Scorjel. Swear and
call names, Mr.. Scorjel! | don't mind il
you half civilized boor. Pm used to it.
IL were not the most patient man since
Job, I'd be in hot water all the time, fol-
somebody is always trying to irritate me
!. But | won't be irritated, confound you
Some men would get up and kick you out
of the office, Mr.. Scorjel, but shall sim
ply--halo, James. Show this man the
nearest way to the elevator, will your
Chicago Tribune.
Frequent Cause of Trouble.