The commonwealth. (Scotland Neck, N.C.) 1896-1929, 1899-02-02
VARIOUS MOUTHS.
Observations On the Faces Ct a Choir
AREN'T THEY so FUNNY?

Idle Reporter in Richmond Dispatch.
Have you ever sat In church on the
preachers "off day." when the sermon
didn't absorb your entire attention. and
studied the mem bers Of the choir? 1t
seems to me that such a pursuit sup
plies ample food for reflection. There
is so much character in the singers,
and some of them have such SELL
satisfied, complacent air about them.
L haye seen in choirs young ladies
whose very faces seemed to say: "l'm
Il very important feature of this occa-
sion, and I can't quite see how the SER
vices could get along without me-"
And 1 may also add that I've seen
bassos and tenors who strutted around
with puffed-up air that was strongly
suggestive of the bullfrog In Aesop's
fables-men who not only thought the
services couldn't get along without
them, but who also labored under the
impression that the world at large was
dependent upon them. OF course, I'm
not speaking Of class, but OF indlyldu-
ais. It doesn't follow that the Nam
bers of cholrs are all self-important.
Indeed, there is just as much meekness
and modesty among this class OF singers
as there is among any people IN the
world and certainly church services
would be dreary without their assist
ance. Ten to one the lady soloist is
frightened TO death and has the blind
staggers from terror, and maybe the
| baritone, with voice that thunders
forth from the very soles OF his tan
shoes, is trembling with embarrass-
ment. Things are seldom what they
seem.
Yes, these singers certainly are inter
esting to me, and I'm not even saying
that I wouldn't vastly prefer hearing
them to the preacher. While I meyer
could exactly understand why choirs
chop up their words into polysyllabic
mincemeats and chant their selections
on the installment plan. still do know
that the general effect is very pleasing.
It wouldn't be we'll to undertake to put
down their remarks in shorthand, but it
you haven't anything to do but close
your eyes and listen, its delicious.
Even if you don't care for music q
have never yet seen man who would
come right out and frankly confess that
it was an awful bore to hlm), it is fun
to watch the mouths of the singers
while i'll action. Each mouth has its
own individuality, and some OF them
have two or three peoples individuality
all combined in one. There is the cat
fish mouth, horizontal orifice that
means business, and the chipmunk
pucker, little pursed-up affair that
trills and tra-las until you are reminded
of scroll drawn by professor In a
penmanship college. The baritone
jowl. overhanging hippopotamus fangs,
suggests extreme feroclty, while the
oval aperture of the tenor reminds one
Of egg -crates, and goes so smoothly you
think the rough edges have been filed
off. All kinds of geometrlcsi figures
triangles, parallelograms, hexagons
heptagons, and octagons are suggested
by these music-maklng mouths, to say
nothing of many irregular lines, slants
curves, and zlgzags. as one star differ
eth from another in glory, so one
mouth diff reth from another in Size
and architectural construction.
Some days ago, at one of the rehear-
sails of choir in this city, the soprano
while bravely singing, suddenly came
to a halt, and Immediately thereafte,
evinced marked signs of dlscontent to-
| wards herself in particular and the
world IN general. The young lady in
question-or rather the young lady out
of question, for after the incident she
was completely disabled-throws her
whole soul into her music, and never
sings hallway. When she Is in earnest
one facing her is reminded of the whale
| that swallowed Jonah, and on this oc-
caslon the reminder was particularly
forclble. Indeed, fly which had no.
thing particular to do at the time, flew
into her mouth to investigate the
noise. The effect was instantaneous
both on the fly and on the soprano
though it is hard to tell which found
the incident the most unpleasant. You
can never appreciate the many interest
ing features connected with swallowing
fly until you make the actual expert
ment yourself. A theoretical knowl-
edge of the process will not half suffice
to give you the correct ideas. The
soprano to whom allude said that she
never had the slightest idea as to the
slxe OF these insects, until she was
thrown into close relations with the
one which flew down her throat. She
now believes an ordinary house fly has
about the same dimensions as grizzly
bear.
Chamberlain's Cough Remedy in