The Farmington times. [volume] (Farmington, Mo.) 1874-1902, 1899-10-12
WIVES AND INCOMES.

wife he adores, { diminishing income and
inexpensive tastes. Imagine also won
an"
The p0ssessor Of an ideal husband and
expensive tasles.-who Is probably the cause
Of the diminishing iGcome Aforesaid"
Right, oh intelligent Entieipator Of
sventA'"
"wsRy
''she has gone
"Ilow gone! Not dead'"
ooh. dear no! No, dead. but gore before
--lha, il, before the income diminished TO
vanishing point"
That wss very oonsidera.e Of her, hht
has probably saved au impasse."
(Which 10 the French Tor the workhousc!'
"Wcli. ycs. ! suppose We both sympathiFe
with the woman. because the man viii laugh
last. Bot wander IRON the subject. Wives
and iuromes, my dear fellow, are both per
ishabie commodities, incomes especially 50.
The former arr comparatively casy 10 re
place With the latter 1t Is different One
can live with an income. yet without } wife.
One can live with both, bui well. you ace
what | mean when say that the woman has,
in all probability, saved the situation. In
such = menagc as you have pictured. the
onus OF maintaining mutual happiness
would rrst heavily upon the man - poor
chap"
VINEYARD leaned forward.
The man WAS desperately in love with his
vie. worshipcd the ground she walked on
and 81 that sort OF thing They never quar-
relied"
Her demands were made exclusively upon
his purse aud his Affections"
Yes. and tbey we're invariably houored.
In other matters she allowed him a superior
knowledEs, and bowed religlously before H..
Told the poor dcvil be was a man and knew
best. while she was only poor weak, little
woman who had thought that such aud such
thing might possibly be- correct, hut was
evidently mistaken, since he. her wise hus'
band. knew othcrw
(which means that she always got what
she wanted"
There was pause and Vineyard sank back
10 his chair.
YES. its all over now h. went on.
while u lasted 1t was good 10 sec. Only
one cloud-thc diminishing income, which
b. d,dn't worry about then, Of which she
knew nothing
no nothing" erhoyd Monterey.
There was not q family jar among al
their domestic crockrry llad they entered
Tor the Dunmaw Fitch, they would have
started the hottest iAyorIlts known for
yrars and won comfortably, That marriage,
ms boy. WAS made 10 Heaven.
But. Ike most things celestial. Il has
lccn spoiled by terrestrial contact. Andahs
cpds"
"Ahou. = month ago tho man had a Ions
and unpleasant interview with the keeper OF
his money bags, who resides IN a dusty Of
fee near L,ucolu's Inn. he wac informed
that II he didu pull up sharp he would drive
biz cart over the prcgpicc-that old, Ia
mtlIAr prccipicc. so he went home
and shaped a speech ,mhudylng bis reasons
Tor q pulicy OF peace, rolrCurhmcnt and re-
form lie delivered It at what be deemed
q favorable moment THIS programme
speedily created az opposition. lie carried
the rctr,uUhmeHi par. Of 1t. Tor be meant
business aud held the purse strings. The re
form be- shciyrd for a time. liu, the peace
motion, dcspte his readiness 60 accept any
reasonable amendment, was carried to q d.
Vision aud lost Here. however this par
iamoutay amiic gets q little mixed. lie
e. iut rCsgu. su the opposition has allied it.
fe.f TO q third party, fought the ChiItcrn
Hundreds (which means. | suppose. the con
i.ncn,I, and The victory rests with the gov
trnmcnt. Now. Phil, which is il, his mon
~ nr his wife,
The light had entered Monterey brain,
bnd hs hand flew to the others shoulder.
Good heavens. Jack You cannot mean
that Agnes has"
"Oh, see. il's the regulation roman trois,
with all IT. hackncy-l accomplishments
lave her last words on paper don't
know who be u. I've made out q list, but
can't decide On single starter Even after
&c even, can't prophecy. only knew Of
1t an hour ago. and care round herr to sc"
II ,5u were ml-siBg In such a case, does not
ulC always tly Ia ones best friendF'
And after this
"Nolhinr' Am bound 10 scour the tAr,t
Tor them Have they not put me to IHcoa
Srnieure enough already II chance upon
tlcm. ruppuse must shoot him, or, better
ttill, hourVhip him. 4 man looks a bigger
fool after a ,hashlng than he does upon
marble s!ah. At present suppose look
fool The companion picture in the maIri
m1nal farce to the rampant mother ~ iaw
D. the deceived husband And she--she hA,
two lords. one spells his name with cap
ital: I'm the other, oh. Afues. Agucsl
wonder what your patron saint, the Virgin
aul Martyr, thinks Of you now! Yet, Phil,
~ do snme,kiug. i'll-lIl take a drink hCrc
and nov Ia mine own club. For. behold,
um once more a bachelor or, the next bcs,
thing to IT, Drink with me. Phil; and con
fer that, for a newly deserted husband, I'm
the deuce 81 a cool hand"
oh. stop that. Jack"
Don't, Phil. please: don't say I'm rorrier
than look. It's commonplace remark,
sad It will deprive me Of ths consolation
derive from imagining that I'm taking i,
philosophically."
There was q long pause. Presently Jack
Vineyard spoke through sickly smile
There are two things. Phil, in this un
tavory business that positively give me
pleasure"
"One is-w
That she didn't bolt with you'll"
And the other"
That she leaves me no souvenir Of our
snmpanionship which should he forced TO
keep as an index 10 her dishonor. The
alrieal, ish't Il. bat. Phil, you haven; ait
sworcd my question. Which do you think
q fellow iancies the least, the divorce court
or that set aside for the examination al
blnkrupts' Would you rather face the
Judge or the official receiver"
We'll. Jack, If must answer, one looks q
better kipd Of idiot before the one than he
docs before the other. And yet--but you
know what mean. Jack. I'm bcastly sorry"
A tear rolled down Ninyari's cheek. bu.
he answered gayly;
We'll old man, Il you're beast.y sorry. I
have my OH Of sympathy"
Il ray, Jack, I'm running over TO OHtend
10 morow; come along"
That's haekneycd way Of forgetting
things. But III come. Meanwhile let us 90
cut aud Kill something; time for choice
or a correspondent.
And few minutes later they lrst the einh
q I'm ~ arm The f-Fi.fe