Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1899-10-30
REVENGE WENT ASkEW.
Jobson Planned 1t Out All Right, but
Was Too Previous.


Was Too Previous.
Mr.. Jobson got home from his office
at.4. 10 one afternoon last week and
found a note from Mrs. Jobson saying
that she had gone to hear the perform
ancc of long-haired pianist, and that
he'd find his dinner all ready for the
girl to serve it.
'"That's Il good thing, too. " mused
Mr.. Jobson sulkily, when he had read
the note. Its a wonder these mat
tress-headed geniuses that come over
here to this country and rake in Ameri-
can dollars, hating Americans all the
time, wouldn't call their game at an
hour that 'ud permit a toiling man 5
wife to be on hand ut home to give him
something TO eat when he wants it, "
etc, etc.
The opportunity was too good for
Mr.. JobSon to miss, so he declined to
eat any dinner when the servant put it
on the table. Instead, he slammed on
his hat and went down town. He
wanted to give Mrs. Jobson u lesson.
He ate an unsatisfactory dinner at a
restaurant, and then poked around un-
til it was time for a variety theatre to
open its doors. He had to watch a lot
of poorly played billiard games in order
to put in this time, and to talk with q
lot of bachelors from whose ways of
thinking he had departed. He was
bored exceedingly by theatre time.
The show bored him still more. But
he stuck it out, for he wanted to get
home as late as possible, the better to
rub it IN on Mrs. Jobson. BY II o'clock
he reflected that he had had pretty poor
nj N 10 on
unread, his favorite pipe neglected for
a lot of cigars that gave him heartburn,
poor dinner, idle talk with slew of
men that he didn't want to talk to,
and. finally, tawdry, cheap variety
performance that might have got a
laugh out of him ten years before, but
was only so much ribaldry to him now.
He took in II couple more billiard
games, however, after the show, and
threw u couple of cocktails into himself,
not because he cared to drink, but
because he wanted Mrs. Jobson to
smell his breath and thus perceive the
awful consequences of her conduct.
Mrs. Jobson was comfortably tucked
in bed when Mr.. Jobson got home
about half an hour after midnight.
She had not even left light burning
in the vestibule or in the bedroom.
She woke up very leisurely when Mr..
Jobson started one of the gas jets go-
ing, She didn' say anything, however.
Mr.. Jobson had expected to find her
up, fully dressed and in tears. He was
disappointed. He was more disap-
pointed that she didn't greet him with
repinings. Mr. Jobson saw that she
was likely to go to sleep again, and that
he wasn't causing any grief at all by
being naughty and keeping still. So
he cleared his throat and said:
Did he play the Buck Dance Con-
certo in Il minor with his hair, and how
was it?"
There was lot of sarcasm in the
way Mr.. Jobson asked this question.
Mrs. Jobson didn't turn over at all
What are you talking about?" sne
inquired, sleepily.
II want TO know if that Dutchman
that kept you away from your duty of
serving meal to your husband after
his day of grinding labor gave you
your moneys worth; also if you think
you're making any kind of hit with
any body by these methods, hey?
'Oh, the recital-that's what you re
speaking of, isn't it?" said Mrs. Job
son, sweetly. "Well, l didn't go. l
had intended to go when | started out
shopping in the morning, and left the
note for you telling you so, but |
thought it might annoy you to have me
away from dinner, and SO when | con-
cluded my shopping, about 4 o'clock
this afternoon, | decided not to go to
the recital. The Fourteenth street car
that brought me uptown passed the car
that took you downtown. | saw you
on the open car and wondered why you
were going in that direction. | sup
pose you had to go back to your office
to work. Its shameful the way they re
overworking you, you poor old thing, u
and then Mrs. Jobson, who knew that
Mr.. Jobson hadn't been working at his
office, turned over and subsidized into
dreamy slumber.
"You can't beat EN-" thought Mr..
Jobson, when he got into bed. He was
thinking of women in general-Wash.