The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1899-09-01
JOKE MANUFACTURE.
AN kRTIFlCER GIVES AWAY A FEW
SECRETS o HIS CRAFT.


Writers Consider the Garb in Which
to Dress Their Antiques Served Up
With Sauce Southern, Northern,
Eastern or Western.
Il have come 10 regard an idea as
purely a matter OF merchandise. said a
local newspaper man, who augments
his salary by supplying pearls OF
thought 10 the Northern periodicals.
"When invent a Joke, for instance
Immediately cons der the garb in
which it Will bring the best price. and
you would be surprised at the extent
OF my literary Costume shop. To Illus
trate the point, lad a sma. insp!ra-
ton this morning that | have not yet
decided how % use. The Simplest form
would be a bit Of dialogue 10 accom-
pany a picture IN one OF the come
weekhes. in which case 1t would run
about like this
"Old Moneybags (seyerely)-I trust,
sir, that you haven't contracted any
new debts
Young Moneybags with engaging
franknessj- On, 10 sir; but / have SUI
ceeded N expanding q number Of old
ones.
q would label this Expansion Policy
Up TO Dale, and, i accepted. I would
receive cheek for the muuificent sum
OF ST.
But | have a good paper on my
staff, continued The industrious young
man. that is fond Of little anecdotes OF
the brand once popular in Harper's
Drawer. and is essentially partial TO
southern flavor. /, / send my jOkelet
there l shall dress il abou; as fol-
lows.
one Of the small tenants on the
plantation owned uy Colonel L. was
good nstured. shiIl.ess old negro, who
answered to The name of Nose. Al
though Nose had al excellent piece OF
land tina, was cultivated with fair sue
cess by his numerous progeny, he was
always hopeiessly entangleG in debt,
and the Colonel took frequent Occa-
sion 10 lecture him on his IMPROVE
dence. One day the old darby hobbled
past the manor house, suuh, appdT-
entity, in the deepes; detection. Hell
10. Nose. called ne Colonel from the
porch. What are you looking so glum
about" Use IL chilly stressed IN
mind, Kurnel." replied the tenant,
mournfully. Wen, l suppose you've
been contracting a lot Of new debts
said the planter. No, SAN" replied
Nose, earnestly. NO Kurnel; there
AIM been no new debts tracted but
they's been er po'ful 'spansion OF SOM
mer III ole ones"
Now that 5 an innocent little anec-
dote, not calculated to bring blush
TO the cheek OF any reader and illus
trating what our Northern friends re-
gard as the native Wit of the co.oged
brother Such jeux desprit sell at
three for s..
i might continue these lightning
changes Indefinitely the speaker went
on, but l think I've covered my point.
However, il | was running a series of
dialect or character sketches l wouldn't
use sNh a joke separately at all, but
would store il awey 10 work in,o the
general drift Of the text. Merely as an
illustration. suppose was the inventor
Of Mr.. DOo.ey, which | wish to the
Lord I was, I'd start of about like
this
'They'se no deEyin' Hinnessy. that
tn imper-rayel policy has taken furrm
hould on IN mag nation OF N tOll4n'
masses, said Mr. Dooley.. They're like
~ i96 GdGire' eXper-riehce e an ~ g "a
bricks. At prison iverythings fer tx
panslon. l was at Hogan's last night,
an young Tim. ye know he's WIG
divvle, struck tn ould man fer fifty.
What fur?' says Hogan. IAN is it
new debts we've been CONTRACTING"
says he. NO, father says Tim. its
ould vans. says he. I've been ixpand-
in" says he. lis no wonder, Hin
messy, that
But you see how it is. With a lit
tie care and ingenuity l can serve I'D
my diminutiye idea in almost as many
different forms as Oscar at the Wal
dorf-Astoria can serve eggs. which l
believe is 916. Sometimes star, to
indite TWO line text for a picture and
expand the theme into 5000 word
storiette. It's one Of the tricks OF the
trade, me boy, without which | should
be obliged to take my meals at a con-
siderably cheaper hashery. New Or !
leans Times-Democrat