Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1899-08-25

arouse Sir Titus Blaydes one night and
| inform him that we have reason to be-
lieve that burglars are in the house.
"While lie Is waiting and am there
to keep him company, you two fellows
make track for the gallery, and when
you get there you proceed to make up
the statue In the guise of modern
burglar by means of coat trousers,
muller, overcoat, cap, shoes, beard,
whiskers and grease paint, Ill of which
you can conceal about your persons.
directly the disguise business is
completed you fire revolver. Hear
ing the report, rush up to the gallery
with long face to tell Sir Titus that
the burglar, desperate ruflian, has
been accidentally shot. You two men
will then carry down the supposed
burglar whose face will be covered
with handkerchief"
Grimes drew a long breath. "Wcli,
I'm bowed" he exclaimed hoarscly,
as he knocked the ashes from his clay,
"if that amt the FUNNIEST an the cut
est dodge rs ever came acrost. Yer
'and. gov'noS, yer and. It's pleasure
to commit fcllerncy with bloke like
yer to boss it,
The evening Of Dec 1 was a typical
foggy night BY the time st. Giles
church struck ~, a cab containing
Grimes, Harris and myself was on the
way to LongwOrth Court.
The dressing of the statue had al
ready been rehearsed dozen times on
plaster Apollo which had bought in
Euston road, and there was therefore
little to fear in the way of a break
down unless Sir Titus insisted on ac-
companying the supposed constables in
search of the imaginary burglars.
However, in all probability he would
do nothing Of the sort; at worst, if he
did so, we would simply abandon the
business and go home.
Longworth Court was some 10 miles
from London, and it therefore took us
the best part of three hours to reach
our destination.
We alighted at the end of the lane
leading to the mansion, and babe Flow
ers, one of my oldest and smartest
chums, to wait till he heard our whis-
tie before driving up to the door. This
precaution was taken in case any local.
police Glanced to be hanging about the
house while we were engaged inside.
We then marched boldly up the drive
and rang the bell. After an interval of
five minutes there was the sound of
| Lo1t 4 th,,
swung open, disclosing a white haired
old man whom l took to be the butler.
He gave cry when the light from
his lantern fell on our faces and uni
forms.
Calm yourself, my good man." |
said, assuming an official voice You
have nothing to fear. From informa-
ton received, we believe that burglars
are in the east wing of this house, and
we have come to catch them. Arouse
your master Immediately"
Sir Titus Blaydes, thin, pinched up
little man, appeared quickly. He was
evidently quite as scared as his butler,
and when we told him our mission he
wrung his hands.
"Be quick, officers" he screamed, his
face blanching with terror, land will
wait here in the hall till you return.
Stay inspector. You might stop with
me in case the blackguards should
come this way"
During their absence Sir Titus, with
chattering teeth, conversed with me-
telling me how he had always dreaded
such an attack, and now it had come
to pass. His reflections were inter-
rupted by loud report, which rang
out sharp and clear through the still
house.
l darted from the hall and an instant
later returned, with a gloomy mien.
Il regret to say, Sir Titus" | cried,
"that the man has been shot dead.
There was only one of them, but he
made terrible resistance, and In the
struggle his own weapon went Off, the
bullet entering his brain. We will take
him away at once"
l thought my heart would stand still
when, after the supposed corpse had
been brought toward the door, Sir
Illus Cdllc lOTMuIu uHl tANiuiilitt III
quick, hurried tone: stop! Set it
down. Strangely enough, in all my 81
years. | have never seen dead man.
Let me see the face of this one"
There was nothing to be done but to
let the morbid baronet have his way
and trust to luck and to the deception
of wig, paint and beard.
The baronet knelt beside the statue
and raised the handkerchief from the
blood stained face. Then II look of dis
gust crossed his patriclan features, and
he rose, having carefully replaced the
handkerchief.
"Take it away, officers" he said. IA
more rcpulsive and rufiianly looking
countenance never saw. Crime is
stamped on every feature"
And that was how the millionaire
collector of the antique characterized q
statue for which he had refused 500
OOO-London Tit-Bits