Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1899-04-28
THE ROOSTER.
John Conway, Of the Norton Champion,
Oaokles off Some Interesting
Oockthoughts.

CGJ the study OF the roost-
m ~ er. What is our
M ISSSMN ROSTERS mission in
WIeSASRfs8V the economy of the
z u universe2
To wear fine feath.
ers and look CAV. Nature teaches this
as the predestined function of the male.
But perverted humanity reverses mat
ters: who, in the civilized groups of
humans, wears fine feathers and looks
gay2 An examination of an Easter bon
net solves the mystery
Indians have better sense than their
pale brothers. Indians. not squaws,
wear feathers. Both rooster and Indian
are closer to nature, nearer to truth.
In the division of labor the same fact
is revealed. In the chicken wcrld what
are the constitutional functions of the
hen7 To lay eggs, to hatch them and
scratch living. The rooster does not
condescend to do either. Among the
Indians the burdens of this life are
upon the back of the squaw. The
Indian is rooster; both would starve
rather than do the work of squaw or
hen.
Behold the rooster: thing of beauty!
proud, digni6ed, imperial. very Solo
mon of glorious decorations! In his
crest is the purple blood of dominion
and sway His arched tail is rain
bow of colors; his neck, reproduction
of crimson sunsets, amythists jeweled
in plumage. and every feather sprinkled
with the dust of pulverized opals,
pearls, diamonds. emeralds, topaz, COZ
nelians, sapphires and other precious
stones too numerous to mention.
The rooster is your dignified individ-
ual No one would mistake the fact
that he is the mogul of the flock.
Suppose another rooster invades his
harem; what is the consequence A
battle royal, war of determination. a
survival of the httest. Not so adroit
as King David, when the rooster sees a
fair Bathsheba bathing in garden OF
dust, he does not send her Uriah forth
to battle in the van but dispatches him
with his own lanced spur. AS result,
brood of Solomons for wisdom, max
Ing an imprudent bather the mother of
prudent progenies.
BOOSTERS are jealous. So is nature.
Neither will brook trifiing with their
laws; both wound and kill the innoya-
ton. Man with all his brains has
rarely sense enough to be jealous; or
when jealous, suspects" as Byron
says. lin the wrong place
The rooster is eloquent on state oc
casions; his periodical crowings are
timely messages of the stability ant
prudence of his government.
We have not yet been able to settle
on an alphabet of hen talk, but chick
ems have a language. We saw a her
o on discovering grub call to its attacl
a whole brood of wandering chicks
that hastened to the scene intelligently
they recognized the call.
East evening two rival hens seemed
to bicker over the pride of place, mex
Q the rooster. They quarreled. henpeck
. ed each other and made hairpullins
scene. The rooster rises above both
seemed to deliver moral lecture full
of sage advice and peaceful philosoph.
which the two hens somewhat disre
garded; they kept ''sassing'' back ant
forth. What does our authoritive gen
tleman do but peck at the covering
hen farthest from him using Language
we shall put in English as follows;
.Dang you! behave yourself; let hel
roost next to me this time, and watcl
your chance to get next tomorrow
night"
Why the male member of our domes
tic fowl is called a rooster has neve
been explained. Hens are roosters; S
are mugwumps or any other animal
that roost upon perch or perch upo
fence.
The rooster is a polygamous Mormon
and would not exchange his domesti
relations for a perch IN congress. :
Nature taught him this religion, SO W
are led to believe, because translatio
of the Old Testament in his Language
has not been open to his inspection
He could not have read the story o
Abraham, Jacob, David and Solomon