The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-10-27
HAD A KICK TO MAKE.
AND HE MADE TT RIGHT TO THE HEAD
OF THE FIRM.
Kicker Went About Landing His
PrOteAt In u Rather Unconventional
Manner, hut the Chances Are He
Got What He Was After.

eyes" said tho tall, loose jointed
man at the telephone, ''that's the num-
Der l w~ant--229."
Double two nines" queried the
voice ut the central office.
"Well, I don't know that double two
nine is any better than the plain, or.
binary two, two, nine, but If you insist
on that style suppose we say double
two single nine and get it exactly'right
Hellol Ia that Spotcash & Co. 'sP"
eyes" responded the voice at the
other end of the wire.
lis Mr.. Spotcash inF
lis it something importants He is
much occupied"
$50 am I. Yes; lisa matter of some
Importance, and ! want to talk to Mr.,
Spotcash personally, Yes; I'll hold the
wire-that ia, I'll hold the phone
"Hellol' snapped somebody at this
"Hellol Is that Mr., s~potcashs
eyes. Who Is it,"
"You are the head Of the firm of
Spotcash & Co., are you notP"
eyes" was the impatient answer
"What do you wantY Who are youY"
"Gwilliams, 1898 Pumperniclsel
street. I want to enter a complaint"
"What aboutP"
~ bought m icebox at your store a
few days ago, and
"Call up the household goods depart
ment, confound you'll ! have no time to
spare to look after such things"
you've got as much time, perhaps,
as I have. I haven't any complaint to
make to the household goods depart
ment. The head of the firm Is the man
I want to talk to. I bought an icebox
at your store a few days ago for $40. rs.
I might have got it cheaper somewhere
else, but that isn't the point, Having
bought it and paid for it. l had a right
to expect 1t to be delivered within a
reasonable time and in fair condition,
It didn't come for four days. and when
it did come
"Say, you, l employ men to hear
complaints Of this kind
~ have no use for them, You're the
responsible man Of the house. The sys-
tenn Is yours. If it doesn't work smooth
ly, it is your fault, When that icebox
came four days after purchase, n Of
the casrors was missing, the varnish
was scraped off the outside surface in
more than a dozen places, and it looked
as If it had gone through a hard season
ut a cheap boarding house
IF there's anything wrong with it..
roared MI, Spotcash, send it back !
can't take up my time
"Stand q little farther away from
the phone, Mr.. spotcash, Your voice
sounds as If you had your mouth full
Of mashed potatoes
"Who the devil are your
II think I gave you my name and
address-Gwilliams. 1895 Pumpernickel
street. next door to Lazarus J. Spill.
horn. You don't know me from a
stuffed alligator. but you may have
heard Of Spillhorn. Don't you allow
yourself to get hot, Mr., s%potcash, over
an icebox. The incongruity Of such a
thing ought to be apparent even to the
head of an overgrown junkshop'-
IF You were here, sir. / should kick
you out Of my office
You would probably need some help.
II that icebox had simply been defaced
q little, / shouldn't have made any fuss
about it. but the stupid ass you sent to
deliver it,
Haven't you sense enough, you in
fernal idiot, to know that I don't look
personally after the little details Of a
business amounting to millions Of dol
lars a year,
IF you don't grasp every detail Of
that business. you Cheap John notion
peddler in a gilt binding, you are not
At to be the boss Of It'll Don't try to
crawl out Of the responsibility by
throwing the blame on some boy. If
that icebox had simply been defaced a
little, ! repeat, ! shouldn't have made
any fuss about 1t. but the fellow you
sent to deliver it didn't have any more
sense than to tumble 1t on the side
walk
Bring it back. blank you''-
"Look here, Spotcash, that won't do,
you know. You are not allowed to talk
in that style over the telephone. Exer.
else a little common sense, Spotcash.
You know 1t isn't my place to bring
that icebox back. The proper thing to
do, you thirty-third degree h~aberdasher
and toy vendor, Is to send me a new
icebox and take the damaged one
back
"You blank fool, do you think you
can tell me-
again let me tell you, Spotcash,
not to use such language over the tele'
phone. Some remote ancestor Of yours
may possibly have been a gentleman.
Try to emulate him. Spotcash. In the
meantime please accept the assurances
Of my distinguished consideration, and
the icebox will remain in my dwelling
subject to your order. II it Is replaced
properly and within o reasonable time.
you will not hear from me again. II it
isn't, l shall call You up, Spotcash, per-
-