davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

AMI WE ne ALIVE IS
ED TO KNOW WHAT THE-THE
PATIENTS DO AFTER THEY
LEAVE U.s."
with a smile of divine pity ON the
sweet lips.
He could see it now, though his
back was turned to the girl busy at
the table, and he gave an inward
groan as he remembered that soon he
would see 1t no more, except in
dreams.
No one knew what that face had
grown to be to him In the past few
weeks. No one should ever know. he
resolved, with a little tightening of the
lips, as he turned from the window.
She did not care for his going-that
was evident.
1--WE take good care of everyone,
hope" she was saying somewhat cold
ly, "As for our being glad to see them
go-that is nonsense. We are very
sorry to lose you, Mr.. Blakeslee-"
A groan burst from his lips.
"Oh. spare me that. l beg" be ex-
claimed, wrenching himself into his
blue cap%e-overcoat.
And we're always interested to
know what the-the patients do after
they leave U.S." she proceeded. hesitat-
ingly. Shall you return to the army.
Mr.. Blakeslee?"
81 suppose So" he replied, "In go
out to Manila and get shot, If they'll
waste the powder and ball on me-"
How %cowardly that sounds!" she
cried, Indignantly. and the little wom-
an of 5 feet l surveyed the big soldier
with curling lip and dark, scornful
eyes.
1T would be drawer, perhaps, to
stay at home and face death in the
shape of a diphtheria microbe or a
mettlesome horseless cab," he said
with rather unsuccessful sarcasm.
tits Drawer to face life than death,
sometimes" was her reply. why
shouldn't you want to live?"
He crossed the suddenly and
stood close to her. looking down into
the flashing eyes,.
81 wonder If you know how pretty
you are?"
Il wonder II you know how rude you
are?" she retorted.
do you suppose it's easy to say
goodby to a girl with a face like
yours?" he went on recklessly, taking
her hands-the poor little hands all
Redeemed and roughened by hospital
work.
Then It's only my face that makes
It hard. You flatter me, sir" She
had withdrawn her hands promptly
from his eager clasp.
"Oh, well. 1t might be q little easier
II you were crosseyed or looked like
like Lydia Pinkham," he admitted. And
they both laughed.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
New Devices In Camaraa.

Films on rolls were introduced into
photography to overcome the burden
and trouble OF carrying a lot Of glass
plates in plateholders. Films are not
as capable Of fine negatives as glass
plates, however, and now the leading
makers of Photographic materials are
offering cameras which carry a dozen
plates, each Of which can be moved
after being exposed to the rear of the
camera and out OF harms way by
means of a flexible leather bag at
tached to the side or top Of the instru-
ment.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

would be In my grave now IL 1t had
not been for your God-sent remedy.
Pe-ru-na. was a broken down wom-
an, had no appetite; what little l did
eat did not agree with my stomach.
1t is now seven years past that l used
Pe-ru-na and | can eat anything
Mrs. Eliza Wike.
Every woman should have a copy
of DIR. Hartman's book entitled
Health and Beauty" This book con-
tains many facts OF especial interest to
women DR.. Hartman has treated
more ailments peculiar to m than
any other physician in the world. This
book gives in brief his long and varied
experience.
Send for free books on catarrh. Ad-
dress DR.. Hartman, Columbus, Ohio.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
A Story of SteriIity,
SUFFERING AND RELIEF.
LETTER TO MRS. p1NxHAM NO. 6o,rs6l

"DEAR Mrs. PINKHAM-Two years
ago 1 began having such dull, heavy
dragging pains in my back, menses
were p~rofuse and painful, and was
troubled was leucorrh9a. I took
patent medicines and consulted a ply
sician, but received no benefit and
could not become pregnant. Seeing
one of your books, I wrote to you tell
ing you my troubles and asking for
advice. You answered my letter
promptly and I followed the directions
faithfully, and derived so much benefit
that 1 cannot praise Lydia E. Pink
hams Vegetable Compound enough.
I now find myself pregnant and have
begun it's use again. 1 cannot praise
it enough."-MRs. CORA gibson, YATES,
M~ANIsTEE, MICH.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

The life of an editor in Servia is
not a delightful one Within the last
two years a weekly paper has had
sixteen editors. Fifteen of them are
in jail for too keenly commenting
upon government affairs, and the six
teenth has Just been hustled of to
Join them for the same offense.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

The last big fire reported from Dawson
City makes the fourth in the last two years.
Three of them started in saloons and two
were the direct result of fights. Despite
the low temperature of the region they
will probably continue to have hot times
in Dawson as long as the whisky and build
ing material last.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
HEALTH AND BEAUTY.
A Book That Should Be in the
Hands of Every Woman.

Mrs. Mckee Rankin, one of the fore
most and best known character ac-
tresses and stage artists of this genera
ton, in speaking of Pe-ru-na, says:
mo woman should be without a Dot
tie of Pe-ru-na in reserve."-Mrs. Nc
Kee Rankin. Mrs. Eliza Wike, 120
Iron street. Akron, Ohio, says: II
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

DIR. Otto Naegell, a Swiss physician, de-
clares hat the best way to overcome in
somnia is to initiate the breathing of a
man who is asleep and to make the head
undergo the various movements to one
side and the other which one unconsciously
makes while falling asleep in a sitting
posture.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
where the Expense Came In.

Young Mr.. Bliss dust married)-I'm
going to start housekeeping and you
can give me a hint or two, can't you?
! suppose the biggest item Of expense
will be the house rent, Ell? Mr.. Chill
ders-For the first few years, yes.
Bliss-And then? Childers-Boots and
hoe
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
The Mean ling,

"A woman thinks that when size
speaks Of the NJ. S. o., the A. R. L., or
the @. K. Y. club, to which she belongs.
that the men who hear her lie awake
all night for a week trying to find out
what the letters stand for. Women
are such mysteries!-Atchison Globe.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

A distinguished historian writes, while
referring to our advent as a colonizing
power, that our influence for good over
European spheres will be immense. This
result was just as inevitable as is the cure
which follows the use of Hostetter's Stom-
ach Bitters. 1t cures indigestion, consti-
patton, and tones up the whole system.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
nnr Last Raannrnaa.

How often we look upon God as our
last and feeblest resourcei We go
to Him because we have nowhere else
to go. And then we learn that the
storms of life have driven us, not upon
the rocks, but into the desired haven
Macdonald.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

"You made me fall in love with you,
Gwendolynne, and how am l TO get out
Pm from Missouri" "Ba bette" said the
young woman to the servant, "Kindly
show the door to the gentleman from Mis-
souri,
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
Society Leaders

Are necessarily people Of excellent jude.
ment, taste aud refinement. In travelinx
they demand the best service obtainablo
and the aberaiity with which they pat
ronize the Union Pacific is one Of the best
proofs Of that lines superiority. Ticket
ONCE, "Old Stand" POI Main street.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

"Im just h%urrying through your
principal cities" said the distinguished
foreigner. ooh, l see." responded the
American. Going to write a book
about us, eh?"--Philadelphia North
American
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
Geological HiatorY.

"You remember the frog in the ia
ble?" "Oh, yes. The one who would
be an OK in size and merely made an
ass Of himself on a small scale."-In-
dianapolis Journal.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

It is the only cure for Swollen.
Smarting, Burning, Sweating Feet.
Corns and Bunions. Ask for Aliens
Foot-Ease, a powder to be shaken into
the shoes. At all Druggists and Shoe
Stores. Csc. Sample sent FREE. Ad-
dress, Allen 8. Olmsted, Leroy, N. Y.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

The real hypocrites among men and
women, too, are those who convince them
telves in doing something selfish and mean
that they are folio wing the dictates of q
sacred, though painful duty.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
A Drawback.

"This region open to fishing on Sun
day." asked the visitor. Yep" replied
the native; "but all the gin mills Is
ose d."-Philadelphia North Ameri-
can,
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

A wealthy Kentuckian disguised himself
in rags in order to test the affection Of a
young woman and determine whether she
would marry HIM for himself alone. She
saw through the rags and accepted him.
They are now rich and happy.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

1t is suggested that c~annonading brings
rain, which, il true, when Admiral Dewey
and the Fourth of July meet should bring
on about the worst rainy season that
America has ever witnessed.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

Mrs. Hard-Do have some more
cream, Miss Sweetooth! Miss Sweet
Doth (hesitatingly)-Well. just a little,
Mrs. Hard. Only a mouthful. Mrs.
Hard-Bridget. fill Miss Sweetooth's
plate up again.-Tit-Bits,
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

"Papa, will ice an inch thick support a
mani" Undoubtedly, my son; why, our
iceman, I believe, supports q family in
splendid style On ice that seems much
thinner
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

section of land in South Dakota for the
c~commodation of all the insane Indians in
the United States. An Indian insane asy-
lum ought to be a pretty lively place.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

One of the Kansas soldiers who wa s
present at the capture of Malolos says that
the flag of truce displayed by the natives
who remained in the town when the Amer
lean troops advanced was a pair of white
duck trousers.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

The bulbs on electric light plants are
growing larger and more numerous every
year.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
"Your Medicine Worked Wonders,

"I had been sick ever since my mar
rage. seven years ago; have given
birth to four children, and had two
miscarriages. I had falling of womb,
leucorrhoea, pains in back and legs;
dyspepsia and a nervous trembling Of
the stomach. Now 1 have none of these
troubles and can enjoy my life. Your
medicine has worked wonders for
me."-MRs. s. BARNHART, NEW CASTLE,
PA.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

The French have laid claim to Dewey on
the ground that he descends from a Hugue-
not family named DeHuoy, and the Bel
gians have put in a plea for him as DeWay.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

"The world is mine," shouted Monte
Cristo. just as the curtain fell in a Havana
theater. 'Say, whispered one youthful
Cuban to another, CHATS Dewey, amt
1f2N
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

He was born in Detroit, Mich, and
when 80 years old, the time the photo
graph was taken. he weighed 492
pounds. He was widely known in
many parts of the United States. and
died In New York
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

Kharkav, Lazan, Astrakhan and Kishi-
new, four Russian cities, each with a pop
ulation of 100, 1000 or more, own and man
age municipal banks.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

1t is better to be touched by the poverty
of the Industrious poor than by the impe-
cunious friend.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
Why IL Ia Cultivated ut All.

Strictly. I suppose. the brain ID
muscle" Then why Is 1t not more
cultivated In our collegesf"-Detroit
journal.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

A Louisville judge has most properly
ruled that if "a woman wears a mans hat
she must take it off when she appears in
his court.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

81 think, Sluggen, we ought to do some
thing to hold up the white mans burden"
"All right; let's follow the first jag down
some side street and try our luck"
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

We honor the champion of Santiago
Bay, and also sell Champion Mowers,
Binders and Rakes, Plymouth Red
Tag Irvine, and Case Threshing ma
chipery, nothing better made. Houses
at Idaho Falls and Montpelier, Idaho,
Logan, Ogden and Salt Lake City,
Utah.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

shall recommend Piso's Cure for Con-
sumption far and wide.-Mrs. Mulligan.
Plumstead, Kent, England, Nov. 8, 1895.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
Halls Catarrh Cure
Is taken internally. Price, 75c.

Sometimes aman who distinguishes him
self at at a banquet sadly fails in that par
ocular before he reaches his home.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

Sand is a good thing to nave in you, but
it doesn't improve the favor when taken
with strawberries.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
New Dining Car Service.

Effective June list, the Rio Grande West
ern railway began operating it's new din
ing cars, serving all meals on all it's through
trains. The arrangement included No. Q
leaving Ogden at 40 a. m. and Salt Lake
City at $3.50 a. ~. also No. 4 leaving Og-
den at 6:35 p. M. and Salt Lake City at
TAO p. m. The west-bound tt through trains,
both morning and night, will also carry
diners. The cuisine is as perfect as it is
possible to make it. Service, a la carte
so that you can have your coffee and
rolls" for breakfast, or you can select from
a menu as elaborate and complete as the
market of Utah can supply.
A little girl walked into a bicycle repair
shop the other day, leading a bicycle with
a punctured tire. Then she somewhata ptly
explained, "It's all out of breath.n
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
Chronic Constipation Cured.

The most important discovery OF recent years IL
the positive remedy for constipation. Cascarets
Candy Cathartic. Cure guaranteed. Druggists, loo,
90 5no
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

whenever a confectioner receives an
order to serve ice cream at a party" re-
marked the observer of everyday life, she
never asks. how many persons in the
party but how many women"
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

The nan who can't be humbugged misses
half the joys of life.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
Ar. you Using Aliens Foor-Eass,

Often the men of means are the very
meanest.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

Mrs. Windows Soothing Syrup
for children teething. softens the gums. reduces In
aammation, allays pain, cures wind oolia Is csnss
o bottle.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

When a girl looks killing, no wonder a
man falls dead in love with her.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

Shake into your shoes, Aliens Foot
Ease, a powder for the feet. 1t makes
tight or New Shoes feel Easy. Cures
Corns, Bunions. Swollen, Hot and
Sweating Feet. At all Druggists and
Shoe Stores, 25c. Sample sent FREE.
Address Allen s. Olmsted. Leroy, N. Y.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

Even men with an aim in life cannot sue
coed without ammunition.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22
JIM BROWN. BIG MAN.

This is a picture OF Jim Brown.
nicknamed Jumbo, who was one of the
heaviest violin players in the world.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1899-07-22

Co-oP. WAGON & MACHINE Co.
The citizen. [volume] (Berea, Ky.) 1899-1958, 1899-09-13
STILL RULES THE WAVES
OF the World In ships and
Uncle sam IL Next.

The old-time boast that britannia
rules the waves" was never more justi-
fed than IL Is to-day. Figures pub
lished in Feilden's Magazine show that
the entire tonnage Of the world in ships
amounts TO a round total of 27,673, S2s
tons, of which enormous aggregate
the United Kingdom and her colonies
own rather more than one-half, or, to
be precise. the immense and overshad-
owing proportion Of l3.9sS, sos.
Deducting from this latter total
LOCI. 5s4 owned by the British colonies
throughout the world, the United
Kingdom possesses no less than IL, $685.
024 tons. II is indeed far cry from this
predominating tonnage 10 the second
biggest, which, IL is hardly surprising
20 learn, Is that Of the United States Of
America, and which figures out TO 2. 465.-
ss7 tons.
Germany takes third place with 2,453,-
23+ tons, which thus follows closely
upon American heels. All probably but
those who follow maritime affairs close
ly will learn with some surprise that
Norway easily occupies the fourth
place.
The citizen. [volume] (Berea, Ky.) 1899-1958, 1899-09-13
OLD FOES WATCH EACH OTHER.
Nsvsios and moki. SIN Kespips .
o-ard Their Ancestors Estsb-
Iished 900 Yeas Ago.

The Navajos and the Monks are an
Client enemies. The Navajos stalk the
plain, wide scattered. The Mokis
huddle on the point Of a PERCEPTIONS
mesa towering a thousand feet above
the rcd desert. Inch by inch they
covered before their prosecutors
through a hundred years until at last
they built their village OF to-day on the
heights four centuries. Though bitter
foes, the Navajos peaceably visited the
Mokis every siternate year on the dny
Of the mysterious ceremony Of the
snake dance.
Three hundred summers ago, 80 runs
the tradition, Navajo boy while watch
ing the dance fell from the brink Of
the mesa 90 a mangled death on the
tumbled rocks far below. And every
second summer since, when the visiting
Navaj Jos come on 10 the mesa they stand,
now in groups, now singly, at the spot
where the boy fell and gaze down from
The heights for hours at time
The Mokis believe the Navajos are
only waiting a favorable opportunity
10 pounce upon them and avenge their
clansmnn's death. Recent visitors to
the land Of the Nokis say that on the
day Of the dance there 10 always a red
blsnketed Navajo on a. point Of rock
gazing stolidly below. B~5ind on the
pile Of the village and outlined against
the sky is the solitary form OF xoki
watching the Navajo intensely. Both
were standing the guard their ancestors
stood through 300 summers.
The citizen. [volume] (Berea, Ky.) 1899-1958, 1899-09-13
THE BUTTERFLY.
Mother Uses the Down from Her Boty
to Make . Nest for Her Young,
Then Dies.

There Is something really pathetic
In the way a mother butterfly builds a
nest for her children. In the first place
the little home where the eggs are de-
posted represents n great deal OF sac
rifice, for IL is lined with several lay
ers of soft down plucked from the
mothers own soft body. The eggs,
having been laid carefully upon this
luxurious, pretty couch, are protected
by m equally pretty coverlet made OF
the same material. These butterfly bed
clothes are often arranged with an in
tricacy that is quite curious and per-
picking. Sometimes bed is made so
that each separate delicate hair stands
upright, thus giving the entire nest the
appearance OF little brush Of downy
fur. Then again the eggs are laid
spirnlly round a tiny branch, and as
the covering follows their course. the
effect resembles the bushy tail Of a
fox, only the nest Is more beautiful
than the brush" OF the finest fox that
ever roamed over country. The build
ing Of this downy nest is the last earth
ly labor OF the mother butterfly, for
by the time IL is completed her own
delicate body is denuded Of It's natural
covering. and there is nothing left for
she promptly and heroically makes in
the interest Of the coming butterfly
generation.
The citizen. [volume] (Berea, Ky.) 1899-1958, 1899-09-13

A pretty story is told at Vienna about
Archduchess Valerie, youngest daugh-
ter OF the emperor. II seems that when
travelling the other day from Linz TO
Vienna she noticed on the platform at
Linz a l4-year-oid schoolboy crying bit
terly. She had the conductor bring the
lad 10 her compartment aud. finding
that he was proceeding 10 Vienna to
attend his fathers funeral. she insisted
on his travelling with her. paying the
difference in his fare. as he had only a
third.claSS ticket. During the trip she
devoted herself 10 the task Of comfort
ing him, telling the boy, among other
things, that she, too, had suffered much
from the loss OF fondly loved parent,
who had died suddenly in foreign
land. II was only when the boy reached
Vienna and was leaving the train that
he discovered that the kind lady was
Archduchess Valerie
The citizen. [volume] (Berea, Ky.) 1899-1958, 1899-09-13
GRoupRR AND PARROT FISH.
The Characteristics Of One s'rikins-
~ Dt,plsyed In the Task Of
ths 0thevs.

The Bermuda groupers are 40 called
on account OF their habit Of grouping
together. There are plenty Of fishes
that'on occasions by accident or design
may come together side by eide, or In
soue other regular order or formation,
but there are few N any that get TO-
gethcr as the groupers do. In the tank
Of groupers at the aquarium, says the
New York Sun. these fishes may be seen.
half a dozen or more Of them at time,
ranged along the glass at the front Of
the tank, heads all 90 the front, and
with their bodies tapping one another
diagonAlly with uniform regularity.
Sometimes at feeding time they stand,
or rather suspend themselves in the wa
ter side by side, in n uniform rank,
heads up, near the surface. and wait
there for the man with the food. whose
step they may have heard on the plat
form back Of the tanks.
A curious illustration OF the fishes
tendency TO group wns shown in an
other way. Into a tank in which there
were two parrot fishes there was put
also a grouper. One Of these parrot
fishes was not feeling very lively; in
stead Of swimming around II lay on the
bottom OF the tank. over in one corner,
Just breathing and taking things easy.
This was the grouper's opportunity,
and II stretched itself out on the bot
tom OF the tank right alongside the par
rot hsh and a. close TO II as II could get,
and stayed there.
The citizen. [volume] (Berea, Ky.) 1899-1958, 1899-09-13
THE GRAND BRACE.
Pathetic Pies Of the Bibuiou. Heat
Of the House Next
MorsInG.

One Of the Bohemian citizen, Of the town
vent home the other night after having
donned pair Of skates that would have slid
him over an Arizona desert with the mer.
curry bubbling out Of the top Of the thermom.
eter. He had no recollection Of how he got
home, and even the next morning he was
not certain whether he was on a storm.
tossed Atlantic liner or making leap from
a balloon minus a parachute. lie went
down to the breakfast table with enough wet
towels wrapped around his head 10 make
Q turban for the mshd. His wife met him
with reproaches in her eyes, but she did not
scold him. She wanted to inform him Of his
conduct the night before, however.
my dear" she said, did you know that
you came very near killing us all when you
went to bed last nightY
Nope" said her husband, thickly, as he
felt his hot forehead.
well, you did. You knocked over the
baby's cradle. Then you blew out the ga,
and ne, We we're nearly a'phy1iated. What do
Her husband IL usually a resourceful man,
but the fumes Of many cocktails taken the
night before somewhat clouded his intellect
He made a grand brace and tried to look pa.
thetic.
"M'love," he said, as a ray Of inspiration
burst through his foggy brain, wasn't
here to die with you!"-Washington Post.