The Wilmington daily Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1890-1902, 1899-06-23
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By RUDYARD KIPL1Ba.

Obi Where would be when the bullets N.Y.
Obi Where would be when come to dieI
Why,
gomewherss singh my chun1.
II 'e's liquor, ell give mo some;
II I'm dyin. ell old my cad,
An ell write 'em ONE when I'm dead.
Gawd send % trusty chuml
-Barraok Room Ballad
Ny friends Mulvaney and Ortheris
had gone on shooting expedition for
one day. Learoyd was stillin hospital,
recovering from fever picked up In
Burma. They sent me an invitation to
Join them and were genuinely panied
when I brought beer almost enough
beer to satisfy two privates Of the line
and me-
"'Twasn't for that we bid you well
him, sorr," said Muivaney sulkily
"Twas for the pleasure av your COM
ply"
Ortheris came to the rescue "Well.
e won't be none the worse for bringin
liquor within. We amt a file O. docks
We're bloomin Tommies, ye cantanbris
Hirishman, an 'ere's your very good
'ealthi"
We shot all the forenoon and killed
two pariah dogs, four green parrots,
sitting. one kite by the burning ghaut,
one snake flying, one mud turtle and
eight crows. Game was plentiful Then
we sat down to tiffin-"bull mate an
bran bread" Mulvaney called it-by
the side of the river and took pot shots
at the crocodiles in the intervals Of cut
ting up the food with our only pocket.
knife. Then we drank up all tho beer
and threw the bottles into the water
and fred at them. After that we eased
belts and stretched ourselves on the
warm sand and smoked. We were too
lazy to continue shooting.
Ortheris heaved big sigh as be lay
on his stomach with his head between
his fists. Then he swore quietly into the
blue sky.
"Fwhat's that for'" said Mulvaney
"Have you not drunk enough2"
"Tott' MIN Court road, an gal l
fancied there. Wot's the good o. aod-
GERM"
"Orth 'ris me son." said Mulvaney
hastily, otis more than likely you've
got throubls in your inside with the
beer feel that way mesilf whin my
liver gets rusty"
Ortheris went on slowly, not needing
the interruption;
"I'm Tommy-a bloomin, eight
anna, dog stealth Tommy, with num-
Der instead Of decent name Wot's
the good O. met II l 'ad a staid at
'ome, might a. married that gal an
KEEP little shorp in the 'Ammersmith
Igh-'S rth'ris Practical Taxi-der-
mist. With stuff fox, like they as
in the Haylesbury diaries, in the win
der, an little case of blue an yaller
glass heyes, an little wife to call,
'Shorpl' 'shorpr when the doorbell
rung. As 1t his, I'm on'y Tommy-a
bloomin, Gawd forsaken, beer swillin
Tommy. Rest on your harms-'versed.
Stan at-hease; 'shun. 'Verse--harma
Right an lef'-tarrn. Slow-march.
'Alt-front. Rest on your harms
'versed. With blank cartridge-load.
An that's the end O. me-" He was
quoting fragments from funeral parties
orders.
"Stop utl' shouted Mulvaney.
"Whin you've fred into nothin as often
as me, over better man than yourself,
you will not make mock av thin
orders. IT'S worse than whistlin the
dead march in barricks. An you full as
q tick, an the sun cool, an all an ALL I
take shame for you. You're no better
than pagin-you an your firin parties
an your glass eyes Won't you stop ut,
sorr?'
What could 1 dot Could tell orthe.
ris anything that he did not know Of the
pleasures Of his life2 was not chap
lain nor subaltern, and Otheris had
right to speak as be thought fit.
"Let him run, Mulvaney," I said.
"It's the beer"
"Nol 'Tisn't the beer" said Null
vaney. II know fwhat's comm. He's
TUX this way now an ag'in an ut's bad
-ut's bad-for I'm fond av the bhoy."
Indeed, Mulvaney seemed needlessly
anxious, but knew that he looked aft
er Ortheris in fatherly way.
'Let me talk, let me talk, said Or.
theris dreamily. "D'you stop your par
rit screamin O 'ot day, when the cage
is a-cookin 'is pore little pink toes OFF,
Mulvaney'"
"Pink toes D'you name to say you've
pink toes under your bullswools, you
blandanderin" - Mulvaney gathered
himself together for terrific denuncia-
ton - "schoolmisthressl Pink toesl
How much Bass wild the label did that
ravin child dhrinkT'
"'Tain't Bass" said Ortheris. "It's
a bitterer beer nor that. It's 'omesick-
nessI'
"Hark to himl An he's goin home In
the Sherapis in the inside av four
months'
II don care. It'sall one to me- 'Ow
d'you know amt 'fraid O. dyin fore
gets my papers2" He recommended, in
singsong voice, the funeral orders
had never seen this side Of Ortheris
character before, but evidently Null
vaney had and attached serious impor-
lance to It. While Ortheris babbled,
with his head on his arms, Mulvaney
whispered to me-
"He's always TUX this way whin he's
been checked overmuch by the childher
they make sarjints nowadays-that an
havin nothin to do Ican't make ut out
anyways"
"Well, what does 1t matterH Let him
talk himself through"
Ortheris began singing parody Of
"The Ramrod Corps" full Of cheerful
illusions to battle, murder and sudden
death. He looked out across the river as
he sang, ard his face was quite strange
to me. Mulvaney caught ms by the el-
bow to insure attention.
"Matther3 Ut matthers evsrythingl
It's some sort av fit that's on him. I've
seen ut. Twill hould him all this night,
an in the middle av ut he'll out av his
cot an go rakin in the rack for his
GOVERNMENTS. Thin he'll come over to
me an say I'm goin to Bombay. An
swer for me IN the mornin. Thin me
an him will fight as we've done before
him to 90 an me to hould him-an 80