The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-09-03

| soy. Mobbo they're rots an mebbs not Il
they're rots, they're tho fooniost rots Oh liver did
SEQ
"Allatonoo . thought occurred 70 mo Islappod
my leg. and turned 70 Mary, that's my wife, and
said
81 have IL They're those blessed gophera'
| "Gophers' sho echoed
"Gophers. said l. 'Bifkins's gophcra He's
had EN- sent to him out Of spite, and he's going
70 make holy show Of my place with them. He's
doop he's deep. Two noticed for long time how
Jealous he has been Of the appearance Of our homo
| Tho scoundrclr
But Josiah, my dear, demonstrated Mary,
that's my wife, Just think. Two poor little goph-
ers couldn't do all that damage
7 don't care shouted bet its tho gophora
I'll have tho law on Binkins'
And. sir. II was the gophers. got up at f1vo
o'clock In tho morning. and found not two but
twenty Of tho little demons browsing on the fruits
OF the sweat of my brow Where they came from
from don't know. made rush at EN-, but
they all got away Then / became desperate.
scattered rough on rats ell over the place but
IL didn't do Bit Of good. Those gophors sctu-
ally got fat on IL And breedi Well, say you
needn't tell mo any moro about rabbits breeding.
Gophcrs can give EN- cards and spades and out
number en- any day In the week never cav
anything increase in population as my garden
did In ten days more fully a hundred Of the
brutes were disporting In IL used to get up and
pot at ON with an air gun but the more 1 killed
the moro turned out 70 be shot at next day. And
Bifkins made mo madden than the gophers did
He actually had the nerve to say that he wasn't
responsible for their profcrring my garden to his
dive Said that could go TO law. and DO hanged.
He wouldn't own help mo TO get rid Of them.
Pretty soon the little devils cleaned out tho
fhev hepa 10 IN IL, h.
Fact, sir. They announced their change of base
by playing tag in tho halls all Of ono night They
ate the bottoms Of the lace curtains dug holes In
the sofa cushions burrowed into tho walls and
mado themselves . bigger nuisance than ever,
TO say nothing Of soaring the women folk half
70 death
why, II was nothing to take up a loaf Of bread.
with the intentions Of slicing IL only to find that
gopher had been before you, and was snugiy
sleeping In tho interior Of the Loaf which he had
neatly followed out They used to make nests
In the flour barrel and In tho sugar boxes
bought a bull dog TO exterminate them, but thsy
exterminated him in q single night He was q
dead dog before morning.
Finally tho climax came last night was
sitting in tho dining room. trying TO road with |
my legs cooked upon the table so az to keep tho |
gophers from running up my trousers when |
heard an unearthly screech. II camo from our |
bedroom, and whom I rushed up stairs found |
the baby having At with gopher calmly roost-
Ing on tho foot of its crib, and Laughing at II
That was the last straw. Fmarohed right over
10 Bifkins, and told him what thought Of him"
Brown paused
"Weli7' asked tho real estate man, sympa-
'Weil," said Brown. I don't exactly remember
what occurred after that II you look at mo
'losely you can make pretty good guess though
We've left the house TO the gophers and are going
70 live In New York. Bloomfield Is a bit too OK
dting for my blood. But I'll have the law on
5ifkins yet you bet
With farewell injunction to rent his house |
n Bloomfield as speedily possible, and breath
ng removed threats against Bifkins, Brown
trode out OF tho real estate Office Enthusiastically
IS he could under tho circumstances