Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1899-12-03


Aunt Judy. I'll not say he amt.
There was a poor lot, all iv thin. But
l have no close rilitives in this coun-
thry. IT'S a way / have iv savin' a
little money. I'm like tn good an
gr-rateful American people. TIL fur
Their We stay away firm thin tn more
they like We. Sieond-eousin-iV-me-
Aunt-Judy- George made a mistake
comm home, or if he did come home
he ought We Investigated his
welcome an see that 1t
wasn't mined. A man cud stand up all
day an lave Packy Mountjoy whale
away at him, but tn affection iy tn
American people is always aimed thrue
an is invariably fatal.
9TH la-ad Dougherty was in to-day,
an he kxprissed tn feelin's iv this
grateful raypublic. He says, says he:
This fellow Dewey amt what
thought he was he says. i thought
he was good, broad, lib'ral man, an
it turns out he's cheap skate, he says.
We made too much fuss over him, he
says. To think he says, Nv him TAX
in tn house we give HIM an tur-rn1n'
it over to his wife. he says. This
scandlous, he says. How much did
we con-thribute?' says l. 1 didn't give
anything he says. TIL collector
didn't come around an I'm glad now
| hung on to me coin,' he says. Wen,
says l, L appreciate ye'er feelin's, l
says. 'Ye agree with tn other sub
scribers,' l says. But I've med up me
mind not to lave annywan talk to me
about Dewey l says, unless, | says,
he subscribed tn maximum amount
iv tn subscription, l says, 'thirty-elght
cints,' / says. So I'll thank We TO tip
toe out, l says, befure l give ye cor
rect imitation iv Dewey an Mountjoy
at tn battle iv Manila | says. An he
whit away.
9TH throuble with Dewey is he was
so long away he lost his understand
ing Nv tn thrue feelin' iv tn American
people. George r-read tn newspapers
an he says to himself: BE hivins,
they think we'll iv what / done.
guess I'll put shirt in me thrunk an
go home, FIR to see tbs hot out here
an iyrybody'll be glad FIR to see me,
he says. An he come along, an New
York was r-ready FIR him. Tn bust
ness in neckties has been poor that
summer, an they was necessity fr
pullin' it together, an they give George
welcome an invited his admirers
from tn country TO come in an buy
something f'r tn little ones at home.
An he ERODE up Fifth avenue be-
tween smilin' rows iv hotels an dhrug
stores. an tin-dolar boxes an 50-cint
seats an he says to himself: HOLY
smoke, if Aguinaldo cud on'y see me
now!' An he was proud an happy,
and he says: 'Raypublics ARE not al
ways ungrateful' An they amt On'y
whin they give we much gratichood We
want to freeze some iv it or 1t won't
kape.
"Tis unsafe FIR amy man alive to re-
ceive tn kind wurruds that ought to
be said on'y iy tn dead. AS long as
George was a Autograph iv himsilf IN
saloon window he was all fright.
Whin people saw he cud set in a city
hall hack without flowers CROWN In
it an they cud look ut him without
egasAle4 ylsssss they begin to weaken
in theft devotion. 'Twud We been tn
same, almost, if he'd married Presby-
teeryan an hadn't decided his house
to his wife. Dewey don't look much
like hero says wan man. / shud say
not says another. He looks like an
nybody else He amt hero says
another. Why, anybody cud We
done what he did. l got an s-year-old
boy an if he cudden't take baseball
club an go in an bate that Spanish
feet into junk in twinty minutes I'd
call him Aiger an thrade him off fr a