The Billings gazette. [volume] (Billings, Mont.) 1896-1919, 1899-06-30

s TWO STAY At HOMES. :


IF wantin to was doin an ther'
weren't no weemen, I'd a ben in San
dyago long ago." said Abner Ricka
back. He rolled a nail key close to tn,
stove, seated himself upon it, dipped {
handful of crushed tobacco leaves from
his coat pocket into his pipe and lighted
the odorous weed with a sulphur
match. Then he wagged his beard al
the assembled company and repeated,
"Yessir, I'd ben in Sandyago long ago.
"Weemen amt much on tightin away
from home" observed Samuel Snuffer.
biting a cubic inch out of plug Of Agri.
culturist's Charm which he had Dor.
rowed from the man who was sitting
next him on the counter. The charm
had passed half way around the circle,
and the remaining cubic inch of it had
been restored to its owner, when Abner,
not catching the full intent Of Mr..
Shutters remark, replied: "Yaas
they's a heap O truth in that there.
Weemen is sot ag'in Turin wars. Least
ways my weemen is. Now
do they prefer the domestic kind?"
asked the drummer of notions, who was
packing up his sample case preparatory
to leaving the store.
mot at all--not at all, said Mr.
Rickaback. "Ye see, my missus passed
thoo SIGH terrible times back in 1850,
when I was a.bangin away at the rebels
down in the Wilderness, that when this
here Spaynish war broke out she sails
to me sails che, 'Ye just shan't CO.
'Marthy, sails I, I'm a veteran.
The governor O Pennsylvania has call
fer 10, 900 men. an he don't name me,
but he means me jest the same. Be ev-
cry mortal an jest right. l bein a wet.
era am included in that 10, O00."
with that I puts on me blues an
gifts down me musket an kisses the lit
tie ones all aroun an starts fer the door.
Well, sir, You ms never seen sech a
time ez was raised when they see l was
off to fight the Spaynyards. Mary Alice,
the eldest, jest th'owed her arms aroun
my neck al bust out with tears. The
sever others begin to bawl, Pap, pap.
you'll git shooted!
"'Children,' I sails. sails I, your
papa's a veteran an a experienced SOL
dier. Duty Gale, an he obeys.'
1.-The missus didn't see things tibet
way. She jest gets me be the collar an
sets me down in an armchair, draws me
boots, walks off with them an me mus
ket an hides EN-. She wern't goin to
have no foolin round the shanty, she
sayd.
"Marthy seemed to think tibet tibet
there settled it, but she didn't know me,
fer all the evenin ez I set there be the
fire so meeklike I was a-thinkin. Scenes
wasn't to my likin, so l conceded I'd
jest let on like I he'd give up all idee O.
tghtin Spaynyards, wait tell the fam
lily was asleep an then vanquish.
"At midnight I sets up in bed. The
moo was shinin thoo the winder, jest
half lightin the room, so I could move
aroun without trippin over the furni-
ture. The missus was a-snorin gentle
like, an overhead in the attic l could
hear a soft sniffin jest like a thrasher
engine when the men has shet down for
dinner. 1t was the children asleep. I
climbs out over the footboard an looks
arou for me boots. There they was
stickin out under the missus' pillow.
Known I couldn't git 'em without
wakin her, l conceded to vanquish bare
foot. But they was one thing ag'in this,
and tibet was tibet the door was locked
an some IN he'd took the key. l tried
the winder, but tibet he'd been nailed
shet. Then ! gifts mad-thet there kind
O. quietlike mad when ye boils up in
side an hes to keep yer mouth shet, It's
the meanest kind O. mad too. 1t seemed
like there was a smile a-playin aroun
the missus' face, an tibet made me sour
er an ever an kinder spurred me on.
"Well, sirs, ez l stood there in the
middle O. the 0 thinkin what I'd do
next and wonderin whether l hadn't
better jist slip back to bed, me eye
ketched sight O. an old comf'table that
Sled a hole in the wall where the
daubin he'd fell out from atween the
lawgs. Thet put me in mind O. a scheme
tibet ] wasn't long in kerryin ont, fer
the hole vas pretty good sized an I'm a
v0SUs oSo0 "" VSy' ~ ACsS ~ w WIS
the conf BILE was outer tibet hole, an
] vas In 1t, ! staid In 1t, too, for jist
as me head an arms an shoulders got
ont o. doors ! felt a sharp prickin In
side, pushed back an a great big
splinter Jagged me, ! tried to 90 on
an IT Jagged me again, 10 bad
most yelled, So ] staid right there
lne-half outen the house an the other
aalf In. Seemed like time begin to
move awful slow then, an 1t 'peared a
whole day fore the moor went from
he top q the old lone pine tree In
Irandaddy's chestnut, which IN jest 30
~, Then me feet m legs was bakin
Rsv1fssstugf an the cold Apryl winds
~ 4 whistlin down me neck,
Rlss soak 70 countin Jest TO pass time,
Vow J mrst 4 counted 70. 0Qo. 900
49, -