The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1899-07-08
BURDEN.
m"ch suherin% sprGEg from Il Name
inflicted Ey "a ThouGhtIess Eu-
ther Upon His son.

u wasn't born crosS-eyed nor club
ionted, said the man from Montana.
"a he made a vicious bite at the end
OF Il fresI cigar. and things have gone
fairly well with me in a business WAY.
but Yet there Is one thing which never
comes up 10 me that | don't feel like
committing murder. Ny father named
me Honaparte. As a child was. of
course. called Iiony. but as soon as old
enough 10 get out into the street the
boys shortened that to Bones and
Bones ! am to this day. I'm telling YOU
that no man who j. Bill or Joe or Tom
ever gets up in the world beyond a GER
tam point. He may he known as a
good fellow, but your familiarity with
his loses him your respect and YOU I'M
Hervaiue him. Let a man get Il nick
name after he has conquered fame and
II helps him. but people are not helping
Jacks and Jims and Petes TO congress
Sional honors or goyernorships. That
name of Bones excited ridicule and
contempt. | licked 80 different kids
for loading it onto me, but it stuck.
wentt to Sunday school and day school
as Bones. | went to college and to
business rs Bones. If nv name had
been George or Reginald or Harry peo-
pie would have considered that | had
feelings. but as it was any old thing
was all right for Bones. No introduce
tion was considered necessary. Being
named Bones | must be a good fellow,
and good fellows never stand on cere-
mony. The name kept me back at
school and college. and though | fell in
love with a dozen different girls before
I was -. they all gave me the shake on
account of the name.
Il finally packed up and took Il skip
of a thousand miles for the sole purpose
IF getting rid of Bones. | simply used
The initial. and after three months |
was way up in the new community.
| opened a store. began 10 court a girl.
and the people insisted that | take the
pustmastership. I'd nave had it and
probably Il wife at the same time. but
for the advent of one of my old ac-
ouaintanccs. He dropped into town
and called me Bones. and il knocked
me into the middle of the last century.
Nobody had any Use for Il man with
such = name. There WAS no weight. no
dignity To il. II would have been all
right for n Digger Indian or Il China
man. bat even the Hanks and Sans
and .kbes Scoffcd at it,. ~ Il matter of
fact. il was Il man known to everybody
as Snuh-No>ed Fill who started the
move to freeze me out. In go days |
took another Jump and settled down in
new place. | was almost Immediately
asked to run for the state senate. ! had
accepted. and the campaign had opened
with Il certainty of my being Il winner
when | WIS given away again. | knew
how it would be. Within - hours |
was asked to withdraw. and another
candidate was put up. The local papers
even tried to make i; ont thar | VAS u
villain for having played the public.
MY third skip landed me in Montana.
I'm there yet. I'm Zones to every man.
woman ard child for a hundred miles
around. I'm Bones to my c~oWpuncher
and Bones to every tramp who comes
along. and I'm given the thruw-dGwn
for no ether reason. For the last
month I've been working n political
racket which vas designed to land me
in congress after awhile. 1t has cost me
Il good deal of thought and considerable
money. and this forenoon | vas dead
sure of success. BU I'd forgotten my
hoodoo. you see. An hour ago | re-
reived this telegram from one of my
workers. See what he says: No use.
They got on to Bones. and the deal is
DIN. Y. Sun.
uyrJrC