The Irish standard., 1899-02-11
Meditations of Mr.. Dooley.

meditations of Mr.. Dooley.
"Whin we plant what Hogan calls tn
| starry banner Nv Freedom in tn Philip
peenes," said Mr.. Dooley, AN give tn
sacred blessfn' Nv liberty to the poor,
down-throdden people iv thin unfortu-
nate isles, We'll larn thin lesson"
Sure said Mr. Hennessy, sadly, I'VE
have thing or two to larn ourselves"
| But it isn't FIR thin to larn u.s." said
Mr. Dooley. TITS no fr thin wretched
an degraded crathers, without a mind
or shirt of their own to
| give lessons in politeness an lih-
erty to nation that mannyfacthers
more dhressed beef than amy other i'm
peryal nation in tn wurruld We say
to thin: 'Naygurs,' we say, poor, dis
solute. uncovered wretches,' says we,
| 'whin tn crol hand iv Spain forged
| man'cles f'r yeer limbs, as Hogan says,
who was it crossed tn say an sthruck
| off tn come-alongs? We did, by dad,
we did. An now, We miserable, child
ish-minded apes, we propose FIR to larn
we tn uses iv liberty. In ivry city in
this unfair land we will erect school
houses an packin' houses an houses iv
correction, an we'll larn we our Ian
guage, because It's aisier to larn We
ours than to larn ourselves yours, an
Well give we clothes If We pay f'r thin,
an If we don't We can go to tn morgue-
| ~
square meal v ARMY beef. And We'll
sind tn great Gin-ral Eagan over Fl
to larn we etiket an Andrew Carnegie
to larn We pathreetism with blow-holes
hould onto job, an whin we've become
edycated an have all tn blessin's Nv
civilization that we don't want, that'll
count ye wan. We can't give We amy
votes because we haven't more thin
enough to go round now, but We'll
! threat We tn way father shud threat
his children if we have to break ivry
bone in yeer bodies. So come to our
ar-rms,' says we.
But, glory be, It's more like rass-
lin match than fathers embrace. Up
gets this little monkey iv an Aguenaldoo
an says he: Nor for us, he says. We
thank ye kindly, but we believe he
says, in pathrondizin' home indus
thries. he says, an he says, "a very
SUPERIOR brand iv homemade liberty
like ye'er mother used to make he says.
IT'S long way firm ye'er plant to
here he says, an be tn time a cargo
iv liberty he says, got out here an was
handled be tn middlemen,' he says, it
might SPOIL he says. We don't want
amy coli storage or embalmed liberty
he says. What we want an what tn
OIL reliable house of Agueenaldoo, he
says, supplies to tn thrade,' he says, is
fr-resh liberty, Fright off tn farm,
he says. I can't do anything with
ye'er proposition, he says. L can't
give up he says tn rights FIR which
f'r five years I've fought an bled ivry
wan | cud Preach he says. 'Onless,'
he says, y'd feel like buyin' out the
whole business he says. I'm a path
ritter he says, but I'm no bigot,' lie
says.
An there it stands, Hinnissy, with
tn indulgent parent kneelin' on tn
stomach Nv his adopted child, while a
obligation firm Boston bastes him with
! an umbrella. There it stands, an how
will it come out l dinnaw! I'm not
much Nv an eXpansionist mesilf. F'r tn
last tin years I've been thryin' to decide
whether twud lie good policy an thrue
to me Traditions to make this here bar
two or three feet longer, an manny's tn
night I've laid awake thryin' to puzzle
it out. But l don't know what to do
with tn Philippians any more thin
did las summer, befure l heerd tell iv
thin. We can't give thin to amy wan
without maxim tn wan that gifts thin
feel tn way Doherty felt to Clancy whin
Clancy med a friendly call an give Do
herty's children tn measles. We can't
sell thin, we can't ate thin, an We
can't throw thin into tn alley whin no
wan Is lookin'. An 'twud be disgrace
FIR to lave befure we've pounded these
friendless an oungrateful people into
into insinsibility. So suppose, Hin
Missy, we'll have to stay an do tn best
we can, an lave Andrew Carnegie Sc
cede firm tn Union. They'se wan con-
ISOLATION, an that is If tn American
people can govern themselves they
can govern anything that walks"