davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30
Unconscious British Humor.

Here is a personal that appeared not long ago Tn a London newspaper. Willie, return to your distracted wlfe and frantic ehildreni Do you want to hear of your old mothers suicide? You will if you do not let us know where you are. Anyway, send back your fathers colored meerschaum." And yet we say that the Briton has DO very lively sense of humor
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30
Deadly GrutIpr.

"You and Briggins don't seem to be very good friends any more"
 No, he is a wolf in sheeps cloth ing.
 Why, what did he ever do to make you conceive such an opinion of him ?9
 Made me believe I ought to take my bicycle apart for the purpose of cleaning IL
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30
]. s'SearehlightS.' :
~% hiS@~~~NsN @Nl@gNN% Ac3
How dtsyou like the title?

Our "Searchlight" noticed a very Impressive and interesting scene on Nam street Thursday afternoon. Sitting at one olfhe muehly ttavers- ed corners was D old woman, poor " clad and bearing an infant on her arm. With the free hand she was sueeessiyely turning the crank of an Old hand organ. A sign bearing the words. "I am blind covered her breast. Several passersbg dropped money into the rattling tin cup and a look at the poor. unfortunate cre- ated sympathy h every one. Soon two small newsboys walked up to the corner and readsthe sign. "She is blitd, said one, ives sir. said the other, see she has both eyes out, . he continued. Wished had a nick al, said the little fellow who carried an armful of papers, but 1 will give her something" and looking around to see if anyone was watching him, he quietly dropped a paper into the lady's lap. He then strolIed on down the street whistling, never stopping to realize the mistake he had made. He had done q kind act and went away happy. Although the paper was of no use to the poor blind woman, she doubtless appreciated the act.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30
Trna to uLmseIf.

Whats the matter, MeManns2" said he captain. Before we succeeded in aEing Santiago you scoffed at the 5panish flag, but now that we have obtained possession here, I see that you are shaking your fist at the stars ard stripes"
 ..Yes. begorra, said Patrick, I'm agin the gover' r'ment. Let's turn the rascals out.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30
Not 10 His Knowledge.

The eminent statesman was running for reelection. and the race was 3 close one. T hear, Senator, whis- pered his fugleman, you have met with another check T hope not, ' replied the eminent statesman. equal ly confidential, T have just parted with another check. Chicago Trip une.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30

New York. May 9. To the Walker Drug Go, Pine Blu fl Ark. entlemen:-We have notified our r 20 house that you are our sfnts in Pine Bluff, Ark, for the nekeye Camera and that you are be protected in the sale uf our s1ods in your city.
 Very truly yours,
 D. < H. r. ANTHONY Co.,.
 No. 59l Broadway, N. '.
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30
To the Public:

To the Public:
 We have, after considerable cor respondenee and by purchasing a large line of Buckeye Cameras se cured the agency of the Best Film Camera on the market. fact tEat we are ready to prove to any one
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30

Recently in this city, negro ap- piled To leading business firm for a position as porter. He was ac- cummodated and given instructions by the manager not to waste his time talking to ladies during busi- ness hours. He nodded and said he would strictly obey orders. That san,e afternoon he was seen by the manager talking to "yalleI gal" partly blocking. the front door of the establishment. The manager walk ed up to him and said, Jim, take your hat and 3our lady love and leave. The negro looked dumb. founded and turning to the manager said, Boss, what has 1 did?e Didn't l tell you not to talk to la- dies duling business hours?s was the response. Dis har ain't no lady, answered the servant, dis har am my wife. :"
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30

" ho will call a nd al- low us to
 demOnstrate te its workings to you. We are always read.a anu
 willing to give you an y
Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-06-30

information YOU may desiie concern ing Cameras, Kadacks, Developing
 Printing, Tassling and Fixing. X etc
 We also carry in stock at all times a complete line of Photograph Sup plies, Cards, Printing Out Paper Paste, Developing Fluids, in fact every thing pertaining to Camera and K odanls Nuark Call and see Us
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
Date.Groxing in the Southwest.

If present advices are correct anoth.
er important industry, that of date
growing, will shortly be inaugurated
in this country. Through the efforts
of our Agricultural Department the
date tree Of Algiers has been success
fully transplanted and successfully &C.
climated in Arizona, and the beginning
OF another profitable industry has thus
been made. 1t Is predicted that in a
few years American orchards will!
supply the entire home demand for
dates. 1t would seen that not only
Arizona, but New Mexico, the "staked
plain region Of Texas, and consider
able patches in California and the In
dian Territory afford the peculiar con-
ditions Of soil and climate necessary
for the date. 1t does not appear to
thrive in regions where the humidity
is so great as in our Gulf states. A
single tree yields from 100 to 400
pounds Of dates per annum.-B Brad.
streets.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
Romance Of the PeninsuIar War,

There has been great deal of jok-
ing" says the Philadelphia Press,
about the odd name of the place
where Sir William Whites English
troops have been doing battle. AS a
matter of fact, Ladysmith did get it's
name from n woman. This was the
wife of General Sir Harry Smith,
whose marriage, by the way. was one
of the rOmances of the leninsular
War. At that time two young British
officers i'm Il Spanish town, which had
just been occupied by an English
force, were surprised by a visit from
two very young and beautiful Spanish
girls OF the better class. These fair
callers begged protection in the alarm
ing circumstances in which they had
been placed by the occupation Of the
rougher soldiery. Their request was,
of course, CALAMITY granted and in IA
short time one of the officers, Captain
Smith, found himself desperately in
love. In due time he married the wO-
man whom he had protected. The
marriage proved a happy one"
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
Com mis- sarIat of the Beers.

The Transvaal has no commits :iaI
connected with its military organiza
ton, each man being his own commits
sariat and carrying ut his saddle
enough biltong and mealie meal for his
use for weeks. Biltong T.. sundried
beef, tasteless, leathery substance
only enjoyed by Beers and Kaffirs
Mealie meal Is a coarse form of our
cornmeal. With such oasis Of food
1t is not remarkable that the delica-
cies they like should he unique. Who
but Boer, for instance, would enjos
sardines dipped in treacle? Yet this
Is a favorite dish among them. They
are a hospitable people, and no matter
at what hour Of the day you may ap-
pear at the door of Dutch household
you are Immediately offered a cup Of
coffee, which they drink from morning
until night, being fortified for such in
dulence by being naturally among the
most phlegmatic Of peoples.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
Bright Sayings Of the Wee Ones.

"Can any Of you tell me the use OIL
the collar bOne?" asked the teacher of
the junior class in physiology. 1T is
used for the collar to rest on" prompt
ly replied the small boy at the foot of
the class.
mo, Tommy" said his mother, zone
piece of pie is enough for YOU" well,
can't understand it." responded
Tommy. You said the other day I
should learn to eat properly, and now
you won't give me chance to prac-
tice."
Mamma" said small Johnny, II
thought you said Mr.. Jones was a
very wise man." Eyes, so he is" re-
piled the mother. well, don't think
So" said Johnny, "'cause when I told
him / was in school he wanted me to
tell what time 1t is without looking at
his watch" How can he tell?" asked
the lady. IL don't know" replied the
little fellow, "but when / ask him
what time 1t Is in the morning he says
it's time to get up. And when 1 ask
him in the evening he says it's time to
go to bed. Chicago News.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30

Island about q year ago, and she has
since lived in retirement, her sister also
being In mourning. They were con-
spicuous figures In their widows
weeds as they drove about the streets
OF the West End, and their resem-
blance was SO strong that the general
public was not able to distinguish be-
tween them, and referred to them fire.
quently as the Mclean widows"
When Admiral Dewey and Mrs. Ha-
zen are married they will of course oc-
cupy the modest but handsome and
well located home presented by the
contributions OF the people, and which
1t now develops Mrs. Hazen and not
the admiral finally selected. Had this
house not been purchased, however,
Dewey and his bride would not have
been without roof to shelter them,
as Mrs. Hazen, her mother, her broth
er and her. sister have houses enough
and to spare. The admiral indeed Will
marry wealthy woman, charming
enough to have won two gallant hus-
bands and old enough to know her
own mind.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
Vice Versa.

When Miss Caroline Hazard was in
stalled President Of Wellesley the
other day, DR.. Hadley, Of Yale, met
President Eliot, Of Harvard. II hope
you are coming to the Inauguration at
Yale" said DIR. Hadley.
II expect to-" replied President
Eliot.
1t suddenly occurred to President
Hadley that as President Eliot had re-
ceived his degree of LID. from Yale.
the Harvard president might properly
appear at the Inauguration as a son of
Yale, so he said: II hope you will
wear your hood of Yale blue"
President Eliot grasped the situation
instantly. He remembered that Presi-
dent Hadley had received his degree
Of LID. from Harvard, and he said:
III wear my Yale-blue hood IL you'll
wear yours Of Harvard crimson"
Agreed" said President Hadley.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
His Wealthy Wife.

I was the only passenger In the
Fifth avenue stage the other morning
when. at Fiftieth street, the door
tered.
There was no doubt Of it, they were
newly married; the actions Of the wO-
man showed that plainly. The man
was small, weakened and with "a
harassed look upon his face; further
more, he had the air of not being used
to his clothes, which were of the most
contrary, was stout, ford, perfectly
groomed, and at least ten years older
than her companion.
After cursory glance. they decided
that l was paying no attention. and so
they continued their talk-that is. she
talked. Her tongue ratUe1 incessant-
ly, she called his attenrr,n 20 a spot of
mud on her new boot ard reached out
one ankle coquettishly. She wanted to
know If he liked her new hat. IL he
thought that her gloves were not
little too large-she had such small
hand it was so hard for her to be
fitted.
Suddenly there was an imperious
ring; they had forgotten to pay the
fare. He hurriedly produced his
pocketbook and began to search for
coin, but found none. With swift
movement she placed ten cent piece
in his hand.
1T Is pity il my wife has to pay
my fare!' he exclaimed. pettishly, as
he dropped it into the box.
She gave coquettish giggle. That's
what you get by marrying rich wo-
man, my dear fellow" she said.
He flushed deep red as il some one
had struck him and glanced up Mt me
sharply to see IL l had heard. but l
was looking out Of the window. Not
for words would l have increased his
punishment. AS for the woman she
was again chattering volubly, and
with her coarse nature she was prob
ably not even aware Of the stab she
had infiicted.-New York Herald
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30

A Milwaukee coal man explains why
there is often n shortage of chestnut
coal and why that size Of coal Is dear
or than some other sizes. There is a
great demand for chestnut coal, while
the supply here Is limited. The coal
man, who Is noted for his veracity,
says that the consumption Of chestnut
coal Is 60 per cent of all hard coal
while the production Of this kind Of
coal is but "a per cent of all hard coal
In the transportation and handling Of
coal many of the larger pieces are
broken. In screening the coal I'm the
yards additional coal Of the chestnut
size is obtained. Chestnut Is the size
the poor people, who are supplied by
the county, use. On account of Its
scarcity coal men say they had to put
up their figures pretty high in bid
ding for the county contract or else
remain out Of the competition.-Mil.
waukee Evening Wisconsin.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
As Seen by Others,

Lewis Carroll, author of "Alice in
Wonderland" told with keen relish of
a rebuff given him by little girl who
knew him only as learned mathema-
tician.
"Have you ever read Through :he
Looking GlassT" he asked her, ex-
pecting an outburst Of delight.
"Oh. dear, yes" she replied. 1T Is
even more stupid than Alice in Won
derland" Don't you think SOP
Wordsworth could not conceal his
chagrin when he heard that his neigh
bors, the farmers, described him as IA
daft, idle body, who went moaning
about the hills and had not wit enough
to raise field Of oats. Youths Com
panion.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30

The Bessssy Religion assures nst Tine u
Life 10 Its vofar. -,

Baking themselves In huge, roaring
| ovens is the climax o: emotional en-
thusiasm and self-sacrifice of strange
sect OF Russians. They are the Begon-
ny, and they live I'm the village Of
TiernOwo, near Tlraspol.
They are not religious fanatics, al
though they have been associated with
religious movement. that of the Poles
In Russia. Their origin was a political
and economical one, their agitati0ns
having always been directed toward
greater personal liberty and political
power for individual members of So
ciety.
They demand the abolition of dOcu-
ments for proving identity and also the
abolition of the necessity for the pass
port, while their desire Is toward cOun-
tries In which people can live unknown
In the pursuit Of wisdom.
The members Of the Begonny repudi-
ate compulsory military service, and X
forced to bear arms they are liable to
emotional enthusiasm, leading to self
sacrifice. The form of death which
they adopt is usually burial while
alive, but occasionally 1t is self-de-
seructiOn by fire.
When the last great sacrifice of the
sect was made the people adopted the
voluntary crematOry method as n
means Of getting an eternal release
from their troubles. On a single day
four families went out from village
and did themselves to death A huge
oven was built, and into il those who
voluntarily decided to die plunged
themselves
Then people who lacked the neces-
sary enthusiasm or strength of mind,
or who felt that they We're not worthy
of attempting the great achievement
knelt and prayed while they wept for
their relatives and friends, whose
charred bones they kissed in an ecstacy
of affection and admiration.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
WHEN GROWING THE BEARD.
Awful Spectacle the Human Face Presents At
That Period.

Whether he intended to do 1t mt the
start or fell into 1t by accident will
never be known. All Mrs. Carruthers
can testify to Is that she first observed
that her husband had not shaved for
three days, and thought he had neglect
lected that toilet necessity through lack
Of time. When she delicately limited
as much to her liege lord he grunted,
passed his hand over the red stubble
on his face and said that was all
right" Although Mrs. Carruthers did
not coincide in that opinion .she held
her peace, as n good and dutiful wife
who wants to live peaceful life. and
trusted to Providence that Carruthers
would see the error of his ways and
visit the barber before he came home
from business that evening. But he
didn't, and the crimson jungle on his
face looked worse than ever that night.
Then things came TO an issue when,
after dinner, she looked him squarely
In the eye and said:
James Carruthers. what do you
mean by going around with face like
a burglar? You're Il sight Do you in
tend to get shaved or don't you!"
mo, | don't" said Mr.. Carruthers,
cheerfully.
'Whaty' shrieked his wife i'm alarm.
I'm raising n beard" asserted the
head of fine house, and Mrs. Carruthers
tossed her head, snOrbed that he'd be a
fine looking specimen with red beard,
and retired from the field
At the end of the first week Carruth-
ers looked like returned Klondiker or
a member of the Peary relief expedi-
ton. Mrs. Carruthers absolutely re-
fused to speak to him. which saved
him between $40 and $50 that week.
Things got worse and worse as the
second week went on and Carruthers
began stunning his former haunts and
clinging close TO his own steam coil.
He forsook the club entirely, and spent
his odd half hours gazing into the mir
rOr at the sunset scene which his chin
and cheeks presented. He began to
grow proud of it. Along in the third
week Mrs. Carruthers conquered her
pride and said:
""hhNS, oiN W. SUMS w 'hV Ah"i'
ley's Thursday night as we promised
some time ago?'
why, certainly" said Carruthers in
surprise, why nOt?'
well, er-do you intend to go calling
on your friends with those-with that
your face in that awful condition." she
demanded.
well, don't know why shouldn't"
said James, caressing the bristly
spikes which now looked like wheat
field after it had been shaved by a
reaping machine.
well, If you will, won't" said his
wife decisively. IF you have no
more respect for yourself and for what
you owe to me than to go about that
way-Oh, dear, don't know what
shall do" she continued and retired in
tears.
They didn't go to the Hartleys', but
as the fourth week drew OH the forest
acquired sufficient length to permit of
pruning, and Carruthers came home
one night with a beautiful Vandyke
beard. And his wife. with .charmingly
feminine consistency, said it was love-
ly. and he never looked better i'm his
life.-Chicago Chronicle.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
Explosion OF q Potato.

A peculiar explosion occurred Sun
day at the home of Mrs. X. s. Garnett.
She had some potatoes baking in a
stove. In the oven was also a roast
of beef and other good things. With.
out warning an explosion occurred,
blowing open the oven door. The toast
came tumblIng out of the oven, follow
ed by other eatables. Upon investiga-
ton 1t developed that a mild-eyed
Irish tuber had swelled up and let CO.
A similar accident occurred near Mon
terey, in which potato exploded In
kettle, throwing hot water ON the
lady of the house and seriously wound.
ing her.-Owenton Ky.) News
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30

George Odom is only 16 years old,
but his earnings amount to many thou
sand dollars a year. He Is the light
weight jockey who has been engaged
by william g. whitney to ride for him
during the next three years. MIR.
Whitney agrees to pay him $4,000 an
nually. In addition to which there IL
the regular. $25 fee for every winner
landed and so for every loser. Odom,
ut the same time, can ride for other
owners, and such IL his skill that
present Of several hundreds of dollars
will frequently be made him for win
ming a race, and the lads brother, who
trains him. expects that George VIII
make more than $4,000 year.
Many n boy will envy the lot or
George Odom, and, perchance, strive to
emulate him, but before doing so let
such boys stop and think of the lie
this jockey leads. When, mounted ON
a powerful race horse like Mesmerist,
young OdOm canters out on the track
invariably gasp Of amazement ana
pity is heard from the grand stand.
The eyes of every woman are turned
on this little fellow with baby face.
and the wonder Is that he can even
maintain his seat. There are, perhaps,
fifteen horses in the race with COM
binations of jockeys, skilled and un-
principled, whose object is to get Odom
In a pocket or crush him against the
rail- anything to prevent him from
winning. But this lad is not to be in-
undated and will take any chance.
Thousands of persons all over the
country are betting on his horse. often
times only because OdOm is the rider.
The instructions are to take the rail at
all hazards. and this Is one of the
most dangerous feats In turf riding.
The jockey must guide his horse to the
rail and II necessary force him on be-
tween the rail and another mount.
whereupOn he Is hurled against the
wooden fence. After taking the rail
a boy will often be practically para
lyzed for days and the whole side of
his body discolOred.
George Odom Is one Of the few
jockeys who will take the rail. and the
betting world knows this. Moreover.
he weighs but eighty-seven pounds
and keeps in splendid training. Like
the other boys he must go to bed at
O'Clock every evening, attend church
on Sundays. use no tobacco or alcO-
holic stimulants and continually take
long walks in heavy clothes in order
to keep down his flesh. He spends his
evenings quietly reading some good
novel or history and Is n modest, un-
assuming little fellow whom assOcia-
ton with the racing track has not con-
taminated. He is a Georgia boy by
birth.-New York Sun.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30
A Brides Ides.

The clergyman had finished and the
organ was pealing forth the sonorous
rapture Of the Mendelssohn march.
Zone moment, George" said the
radiant bride. and. facing the audience.
she raised her exquisitely bound,
though somewhat bulky, prayer-book
in her daintily gloved hands, and point
ed II directly at the brilliant audience.
There was sharp click.
"All right, George" said the bride;
"come along"
And as they marched down the aisle
she showed him that the supposed
prayer-book wasn't prayer-book Mt
sll. 1t was camera!
Its my own idea. George" she
whispered. Clever, isn't ity"-Cleve-
and Plain Dealer.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1899-11-30

81 was much amused one day about
a year ago, when was on my way to
Washington" remarked a Detroiter
not long since. II had finished good
meal in the dining car and was enjoy
ing myself in the smoker. Pretty soon
two young fellows came in who APP
peared to me to be college undergradu-
ates returning to their alma mater.
They began to talk of a visit they had
paid to Washington during the Christ
mas holidays year before, and We're
recalling incidents and episodes OF the
trip. They mentioned the name of
Congressman from a Western State
and told of the good time they had
had at his house. One of them was i'm
especially good spirits when speaking
of the Congressman's daughter.
"'You know, had great time with
her. he said, and fiatter myself that
i made quite an impression. I guess
she hadn't seen much of society. for
l just waded In and took her of her
feet. didn't do thing but take her
to half-a-dozen functions" and I guess
j made her think she was the only
girl there was He said n good deal
more in the same strain, all of which
l couldn't help hearing. The reason IL
interested me was this. knew the
Congressman and knew his daughter
quite well. She was about 30 years
old, almost ten years the senior of the
young fellow who had taken her or
her feet She had spent four years in
New York society, two years In Lon
don, where she was favorite. two
years In Chicago, and had been for
four years one Of the most popular
young ladies In Washington social cir
Giles. l rather imagine that there were
two playing at the game of making the
other think OF being the only one there
was "-Detrolt Free Press.