The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1899-05-14
L0CKsLEy's HAUL.
lNLodernired.l

(Modernized.)
Comrades. hold me here little, for
scarce can longer stand,
Canned roast beef not Spanish valor,
downs me on this foreign strand.
Bear me hence little farther. where, be-
side yon cactus screen.
can curb this hortid gnawing In a
draught OF Hippocrene.
AS before. the soyran bug-tuicc may per-
chance relieve again
Grievous pangs and woes titanic which at
flict my abdomen.
Here. reclined within tho shadow OF these
lnterlaclng vines.
] can hear the stormy clamor of our fierce
invading lines.
And though body-racked and tortured,
can speculate and grope
How this pain was first engenderod, how
attained its wider scope.
All, my Cousin Amy, cruell mine nave peen
the years of grlet
But loves anguish Is not in II with pains
wrought by roasted beef
Imprisoned on the ships,
And our stomachs gagged together as the
hash pile passed our lips.
For an opening Wild aromas struggled from
each Soldered can,
Fraught with promise to the skipper, but
confusion to the man.
And said THESE things are bogus,
they're reminders OF the past.
And their breath proclalmeth stoutly that
the corpus can not last
Whose the fault for which | suffer on this
uninviting ground
Where the lizards thrive In myriads and
the fraudful mango's foundg
I will dip into the future like the wizard
OF Lochiel.
may gain some useful knowledge which
the vision can reveals
Through the future see proofs come 10
our martial boards again
That our spring time yermined canned
meats make the hercest fighting men.
For in spring the frogs soprano browns tue
hum OF humble bees;
In the spring the shippers fancy turns 20
thoughts OF stronger cheese,
II the spring the thoughtful trader floats
himself a larger note,
In the spring ntenser breezes grow around
each billy goat.
IL the spring the seedy poet goes still
deeper into seed
IL the spring the deep gorged vulture
shows the signs of fiercer greed.
True. we chase wars Turing grandeur; not
to barter life away
To the vultures IN wars commerce, who
thrive best on human prey.
While young manhood for the country
makes sacrifice OF self.
Others reyel in wars profits in the higher
realms OF pelf
Patriots tow'ring Teneriffe-lke, great
through governmental deals;
For we gauge our mightiest patriots by tho
greatness Of their steals
Let the soldiers feed and sicken. suffer
agoDies and die;
There are myriads to replace them--an I'M
limited suDDly!
Common soldiers but bear weapons--great-
er patriots sink with cares,
And the country's flush with soldiers, but
it's short on millionaires.
y
Therefore. wise ones deem it better that
men perish, one by one.
Than that censure reach the leaders and
our party be undone,
Hence the verdict OF the beef court, which
the future will proclaim
VIII enhance our party's glory, give more
luster TO Its fame,
But the meats were sweet and wholesome,
soon our war boards will declare.
And 1t furnished our brave heroes with a
| rich. substantial fare.
But we failed to take advantage. ere the
war rose fierce and high.
To present the Spanish army with our
roasted beef supply.
Then our contest had been shorter with
the chivalry OF Spain.
For our canned meats. not our bullets
would have swelled their lists OF
slain. John A. Kirlicks.