The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-07-02
TWO SMITHS IN THE STRIP.
MISTAKE or 4 CHEROKEE LANDLORD
UHO JCDGED By CLOTHES


Them submerged free lunches, consistin'
OF the cherries that tho barkeep puts into tho
Martinetti cocktails he juggles IN. are very
much to my taste" remarked Col Martin /
Haley OF the Cherokee STRIP. now on sojourn /
in the kindred wllds OF Brooklyn. The dee |,
of putin a small bite to eat In tine bottom OF n /
glass whore a man must take an appetizer be- !
fore he can get Mt 1t il worthy Of an Irish |
brain, an I'll bet a yearn' hrifpr that this /
here Martinetti is nothin' hut good old Celtic |
Martin. with the Dago ETH hitched onto his |
right name.
a man that likes cherries Us l do con-
tnuod Col. Haley. will chcorfully put himselt I
to the trouble OF removln' whatever is between
him an the fruit he seeks. | find that eleven |
or twelve cherries punched ur that way are |
entirely film. while II yc pick em off the tree |
ye can eat peck measure full which goes to |
show that Martnettis scheme is not only |
pleasin. but economical, i'll the end.
You folks in the cfete East can't appreci- |
atc the liquid blcssin's which a divine Provi- |
dence has put We next to until we've been out |
in the Cherokee strip. with yer tongues |
parched and entertainin' a constitutional dis |
like for alkai water. Lookin' for drop OF |
somcthin decent and conson' in the Strip Is |
like huntin' polar bears in hell. tejious in the
detail and unsatisfactory in the result. The |
most prevalent cocktail in my part OF the coun- |
try Is made 10y miXin' alcohol and water with |
enough sorghum syrup to make 1t slide down
easy. Kansas is n temperance State. as they
call 1t, and the Strip is worseithan that. which
means that when man gets drunk his viola-
ton of the law carries its own penalty with It,
"Sein' n Cherokee drop of rum is almost
MS bad MS stealth sheep down there. and the
only man that ever did it and retained the re-
srect of n dommed unresppctabe community
rna n fppr IA IA ~ m n sherwood who q
doctor Twin right inside the Kansas line.
Az course. yen understand that doctor can
write prescription with whiskey into it and
have it filed at any Kansas drug store. That's
how them drug stores live. Most Of them have
q stock consistin' OF cheap spiritus fermenti-
learned that word through personal expert
ence-uunine white lead. putty and glass.
with side line Of Colts forty-fours and car
Vel this Doe Sherwood. who lived adjacent
to the Cher"kees, and had sheepskip to prove
that he was entitled to do it, used to have only
When an InIun come to him, he'd look at his
tongue ,nd write out n s ip Of paper with big
X which had a line run through it to make II
look official An what he always wrote was
s Sn.n'n f@rms"''. s 5Sr
Sly. As much as YOU like often as you please.
SHERWOOD.
would collect what he was lookin' for. while
the drug store would be relieved from all re-
sIomsinility.
temperanee EVANGELIST by the name Of smith
struck Coireyvlle tn. town nearest the strip
the hot" and registered as r. Smith. Il ansas
CITY On the same train there was only one
Robert smith. Kansas City.' Now the cvnngel-
list looked ike pretty sporty nov, for he had on
"A little diamond pin aud nice fashionable clothes
Of a yalerish gray color. wifi the other Smith,
who, ye understand. wasn't an evangelist at
all. bat q lghinih rod agent. lOokin for far
mn a shear dressed highly
able in back clothes and plug hat. SO as to
make his Job OF sh"arin, the easier; Ye couldn't
kilograms from both Of these Smiths telin'
him they was comm down and TO save no ms
which was which: Like, any other mddlin'
sort OF man. he took the lightnin rod man for
the temperance Teller and the evangelist for
NV shin 70 get SOLID with the preacher for
ns man in the bsS chS. and nd m
make himself agreeable. Hows yer noble
work goin, OF ?, he asks ina tone Of voice like
says the other chap, rnd ngurin' from the land
lords tone of speaking that he was on the re-
o. heaven 'ltnonght. SAYS the landlord. a
oft hs h' T% 1Hn s thS iss
lightnin' rod chap. who was surprised himself.
Tneres no money in it. s"en' that volcanoes in
! this country amt nett her frequent nor hustlin.'
with which he goes into the dinn' room for
'!WeiI the landlord fecln' locoed for fair.
turns TO the evang"lts, with the dude clothes,
| rod business when he. with his hands cappcd
! around the place whore a cinch band would 10
trouble, ana I'm afrarel it'll get worse il
| don't see doctor Could you recommend me
The landlord thinkin' to do favor to fell
| Ter creature in need 81 h lister and a stranger
in the town. gives him wink and says Doc,
| Sherwood Is the man ye want to see I'll have
kni f he d ." 1T" When Se ev "rsS
got to Doe. Sherwooi's, teiIin' him that the
landlord had sent him there; he begun to map
| out his symptoms. bur the Doe cuts him short
then gives him one Of them favorite prcsrrip-
tions OF his, also tein' him whore to get it
THE temperance chap does as he's told.
and then retires to his room in the hotel to
| take the treatment. 1t comes to be about
brethercn OF the church is hegnnin' to gather
IN tn" hotel narIor TO- greet their guest, when
the stairs. chuck the bottle down tho same
,me as he d",s his S"cs Hey wHmfor GGt
asks the bunch cora lad IN the parlor. Only
HoSo2Ih sm tT Anal 'Ii ho oGI~ eoin Il"
anaora '"T viii H' thu " sh h." ' Stop says his
v"ca organ pulled out full and strong It's
sham ha ;" Sh"nd and !" MemGSth the same
M Smh says oI one ' Of the hs sisters ws
| business is business, SAYS the landlord. an
Especially beasts observes the sister. snif1n.
| an me. who was rounded IN in the grocery
store and put on the reception committee
could hardly help laughn out loud BE that
| us Il may, rs the Scriptures says observes the
| landlord. turnin' his eyes M. and then he sends
| his kid out for to have the prescription re-
| newel.
Pretty soon tho liGhtnin rod man in tho
| black outfit stravs into the rar!or. accidentally
like and the l4ndlurd era los him AMI intro
dures him as Mister Smith. which. Of course.
was no lie Yen he, expected at the church in
| half an hour saws the Landlord. bOwin' like a
| huckn' pony. For whyf asks Smith. To
| deliver yer speech on the noble cause OF tom
| prrancc. Cf course, says the landlord The
hell yc say. saws Smith, hrckn' an. and all the
| sisters kinder Gnsprd hut me. sizin' up the
situation. comes IN 10 Smith and gives him Il
! quiet steer as to how the land LAYS Smith
| was fly coyote and drops in a second. Lend
| on. h" saws like q ulnv actor and they ali
| corts him to the church. across the road. me
| hrin n guard Of honor
| Well the temperance speech that Smith
| made was for sure cyclone He cusse whis-
| KEY ami then COtf"vyie whisk"y and what he
| said about that reckon he meant, for he'd
| probably sampled II. and then ne switched 10
| the celestial anger which was bound to over
| come inilutuus towns. such as COlIcyville. in
tn" shape Of lightnin' which descended alike
GU the lust and the unjust And then the gall
| of The told how he had especially pro-
vdod for the earthly salvat ion Of the righteous