davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09

Carter, Miss c. Paiecki, F. A. Vickery.
II. Frohlich. F. Won Sender, J. Berg
strom. J. w. Hail. l.. Kee, J. Kolohoe-
10, C. Yick. Can Chock, and 70 deck.
From Eleele, per stmr. Noeau, Oct
u. II. Spencer and deck.
From Yokohama, per stmr Gaelic.
Oct. IA. w. Bash. Mrs. 4. w. Bash,
Miss c. Bash, Miss Mary Bash, Mrs.
Sarah Beers, j. III. Benedict, l.. a.
Blumberg, T. j. Bourne. Miss Virginia
Cranna, w. G.. Coke, Mrs. Z. II. Con-
ger, Miss Conger. Harry De Gray, r.
Dearborn, Mrs. F. Dearborn, Master
Dearborn. w S. Davidson, Geo. Fred
ericks, Lieut.. G. Z. Gelm, U.S.N., Mrs.
G. E. Gelm, Chas. Hardy, DR.. F. A.
Hardy, T. Ikeda, II. w. Leu, Jas. III.
Love, H. NJ. Martin, Miss Margaret
| Moore Victor Marsh, Col J. w. Pope,
Miss Pierce, b. NJ. Stiebel, DR.. T.. a.
Scale, r. Sano, VIM. NJ. Swart, Rev. j
B. Slocum, Mrs. J. B. Slocum, Maj. G.
B. Urmston, Lai Tai Wing, DR.. II. ID.
Wilson, c. Yoerger, Thos. Davie.
From Maui, per stmr Maui, Oct. s.
G. p Grimwood and wife, Miss s. Ke-
kahuna, Miss X. Hayselden, David
KAPPA, r. j. Place, j. Mckay, w. II.
| Campbell, W. Dunn. T. F. Sanborn,
ReY. kakdnl, wife ana cnlld, MISS Nal
mi, c. K Chow, c. Ferguson and wife,
A. Garvie, p. Krog, G.. Horner, ID. Ly-
man, Dr. Winslow, S. Berliner, III. J.
| Harrison, A. p. Boiler, S. Parker, J. ID.
| Holt, w. Stoddart, Alama and wife, ID.
X. Unauna and wife, Miss Sheldon,
Miss King, A. A. Wilder, Mr.. Meier,
| L. A. Thurston, j. B. Castle, w. o.
| Smith, r. r. Berg. Captain Mcleod,
| Captain w. L. McAllep, w. Bal, r. S.
| Moore, w. III. Lambert, c. NJ. Logue,
r. w. Wilcox and SO deck.
From Paauhau, per stmr. Helene,
| Oct. 6.-J. A. Moore, A. Madden.
From Kaanapali, per stmr Kauai,
| Oct. CT. Hayselden and wife, C.
| Hedemann, c. FOwden.
| From Makaweli, per stmr. Mikaha-
| Comstock and 10 deck passengers.
| From San Francisco, per schr. Ho-
| noipu, Sept. 13.-Carrie T. tombstone,
| Maud T. tombstone, Harold w. John
stone, Norman J. Higgie.
Departed.
! For San Francisco. per stmr. Gaelic
| Oct. S.-MrS. G.. A. Robertson, Mrs. ID.
c. Little and daughter, A. Hamburg
F. w. Graham, Mrs. Parker, child and
maid, DR.. c. b. Wood, F.. B. Moseiey,
Lieut.. Gen. Sanford, V. Y. Scantlebury
S. NJ. Ballou and wife, c. G. Ballentyne
Mrs. Lovejoy, c. E. lie Munyon, c. b
Whiting.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
ASSESSMENT NOTICE.

NOTICE is HEREBY GIVEN THAT
the fourth assessment OF ten (1Ol per
cent on the capital stock of the Homo
lulu Rapid Transit & Land Co., will be
due and payable to j. II. Fisher ut Bish-
OPP & Co., bankers, Honolulu, on the
LIST day of October. pro&. The shares
upon which any assessment may re
main unpaid after thirty days from
said date will be declared delinquent
CHAS. II. ATHERTON,
Secretary II. II. 7. & l.. Co.
Honolulu, Sept. 20, 1899. 534S
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
NOTICE TO PASSENGERS.

FROM AND AFTER THIS DATE
passengers may book and secure tick
cts for passage by steamers OF the In
ter-Island Steam Navigation Co. Ltd.
at the main Office OF the company
Queen street. up TO one hour previous
10 sailing time OF steamers. after
which hour. tickets will be sold at the
wharf Office.
INTER-ISLAND STEAM NAVIGA-
TON CO, LTD.
y. +. GEDGE. Sec'y.
Honolulu, III. l.. Oct. .. 1899. 535s
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
WANTED.

a LARGE ROOM OR LOFT OF
from 1900 to 1900 square feet floor
space suitable for a night industrial
school for boys. 1t should be easily
accessible, dry, and at reasonable rent.
Second or third floor satisfactory.
School will be under direction of re-
sponsible man and no rowdyism will
be allowed. Any one having informa-
ton on this subject will do a favor to
the Industrial Committee of the Bows
Clubs by addressing P. NJ. Pond. chair
man, p. o. box 699. 5351
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
SHIPPING INTELLIGENCE.
ARRIVED AT HONOLULU.

Friday, October g.
Stmr. Kauai, Bruhn, from Kaanapa-
Ii, Oct. 6: 4.005 bags sugar, l pkg. sun
dries.
Saturday, October Z.
Schr Honoipu, A Olsen, from San
Francisco, Sept Is, Palaau, Oct. s:
lumber and A passengers.
Stmr. Mikahala, Peterson, from Ma
kaweli, Sept. s: 1880 bags sugar, SO
bags taro, 10 pkgs. sundries.
Schr. Ada, Moses from Hanalei: 500
bags rice.
Stmr Helene, Weisbarth. from Pal
hal, Oct. 6: 1850 bags sugar, 90 head
cattle, Is hogs.
Schr. Lady, from Oahu.
Stmr. Mokolii, Dover, from Molokai
Oct. 6.
Stmr Noeau, Wyman, Is hrs. from
Eleele.
u. s. A. r. Sheridan, Pierce, IS days
% hrs. 30 min, from San Francisco,
with troops to Manila, to U. S. quar-
termaster.
Sunday, October s.
Stmr. W. G. Hall, Thompson 10 hrs.
from Nawiliwili: Ii bdls. hides. 10
pkgs. sundries.
Stmr. Kilohana, Thompson, s hrs.
from Kaanapali.
Stmr Maui, Cameron. II hrs. from
Kahului: 21S SKIS potatoes, So SKIS corn,
1853 SKIS taro, SO pkgs hides, l horse,
Isl hogs, 1873 pkgs sundries.
Stmr.- Waialeale, Green, IA hrs. from
Kappa.
Stmr. Gaelic, Finch, from Yokohama,
Sept. %: pass. and mdse. TO Fl. Hack
field & Co.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
NOTICE.

TO PROPERTY OWNERS ~ KAI-
muki, Kipahulu and Kapiolani Park
additions:
Applications for water privileges
from the Pahoa Water Works, Kaimu-
XII Tract, will be received at the Office
of Gear, Lansing x Co., Judd building.
Fort street. up To the LIST day of No
vember. 1899.
Water privileges will be granted at
Government rates, but water mains
will not be laid from the Pahoa Wa
ter Works TO connect with properties
adjoining the Kaimuki Tract unless
sufficient applications are received for
water privileges to justify the laying
of said water mains.
GEAR, LANSING & CO..
1851 Judd building Fort street.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
SAILED FROM HONOLULU.

s1 Il Saturday, October T.
Stmr James Makee, Tullett, Kappa
U. S. transport Tacoma, Buford, Ma
Mia.
Stmr. Kilauea Hon. Mosher, Mauna-
lei.
Schr. Golden Gate, Pahia, Kaunaka-
kali
Sunday, October s.
U. S. transport Centennial, Eagles,
San Francisco.
Am. schr. Olga, Ipsen, Puget Sound.
Am. bkt. Omega, Harrington, Puget
Sound.
Stmr Gaelic, Finch, San Francisco.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
FURNISHED COTTAGE TO LET

A COMPLETELY AND COMFOR-
tably furnished cottage house OF Z
rooms and bath on College street
above Dominis street, in Makiki. con-
venient to the cars and in every re-
spect comfortable home. For par
ticulars apply of
WILL T.. FISHER.
Real Estate Agent and Auctioneer.
5351
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09

IF YOUR HOUSE IS FOR RENT
IF YOUR PROPERTY IS FOR
SALE
IF YOU WANT TO RENT 4
HOUSE
IF YOU WISH TO PURCHASE
REAL ESTATE
Call on WILL E. FISHER
Real Estate Agent and Auctioneer,
1856 Cor. Fort and Merchant SITS.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
NOTICE TO C0NSiCNeES.
BARK IOLANI.

The bark Iolani will begin discharg-
ing at Brewers wharf on Monday. the
9Th inst, at a. IN. The vessel will
rot be responsible for any goods left
on wharf after "a hours
c. BREWER & CO. LTD.
1858 Agents Bark Iolani.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
FOR SALE.

A wELL-BRED GENTLE DRIVING
mare: safe for lady TO drive; will be
sold cheap. as owner has left the city.
Address =. q. box 6SS. 1854
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
MEETING NOTICE.

THE REGULAR MEETING OF THE
Catholic Benevolent Union will take
place this (Monday) evening at 7:3O
o'clock at the Catholic Mission.
JOHANNES F. ECKARDI,
Recording Secretary
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
BORN.

CHILLINGWORTH- Honolulu. Oc-
tOber 6, to the wife of S. F.. Chilling
worth, son.
SIMS-In this city, October Z. 1899, to
the wife of w. r.. Sims, son.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
WANTED.

CUSTOMERS TO CALL AT THE
Triangle Store, corner King and South
streets, where they can obtain a COM
plete line of Groceries, Provisions, etc.
at lowest market prices. Telephone
SO. $3.50
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
FOREIGN PORTS

TACOMA-Sailed,S Sept %, ship. Oc-
cidental, for Honolulu.
PORT GAMBLE-Sailed. Sept %
schr. Nokomis, for Honolulu
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
LOST.

POSTAL SAVINGS BANK BOOK
No. 1902 ID" Finder please return to
tnlS once. 1854
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
NOTICE.

DURING THE ABSENCE OF MR..
c. G.. Ballentyne, Mr.. ]. III. Fisher will
act as manager of the Honolulu Rapid
Transit & Land Co.
CHAS. III. ATHERTON.
Secretary II. II. Il. x l.. Co.
Honolulu. Oct. Z. 1899. 1851
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
LOST.

CERTIFICATE NO. 16T MAUI TEL
ephone Co. stock in the name of c..
Ferguson, has been lost. Finder will
please return same to c. II. Dickey.
secretary Maui Telephone Co., Paia.
Maui. 535l
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
WANTED.

POSITION AS ENGINEER BY 4
young man that understands the bust
ness thoroughly; also a first-class
pump-man. Address 5. Dorff, City.
$3.50
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
FOB SALE.

THE RESIDENCE OF f. r. HEN
dry. on the corner OF Kinau and Pen
sacola streets. Apply on premises.
533s
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
FOR SALE.
FOR SALE.

\ BABY CARRIAGE new. ONE
cornet. one alto horn: will sell cheap.
Address =. o. box 29t. city. $3.50
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
DIED.

SIMS-In this city, October Z, 1899,
Katie E., beloved wife of w. r.
Sims, and daughter of the late Chas.
II. Rose, aged % years.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
PASSENGERS.
Arrived.

From Nawiliwili, per stmr Mikaha-
La, Oct. 8.-A. S. Wilcox and wife, w
II. Rice, A. Crop, L. e. Pinkham. F.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
FOR SALE.

\ FEW LOTS ON KING STREET
in Palama District: part cash. balance
on mortgage. \ good opportunity to
build on main street. Apply to
WILLIAM SAvIDGE.
No. $40 Fort street.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
NOTICE

MISS NINA ADAMS WILL OPEN
classes in physical culture at the Y
NJ. c. 4. gymnasium. Ladies' class
Wednesdays and Saturdays, S:i5 n. NJ:
children's class, Saturdays. $3.50 a. m.
teachers class. Saturdays, 1915 n. m
1856
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
LOST.

AN OPEN-FACE GOLD-FILLED
watch, with guard attached: No. S14-
449 on inside case. Finder will be suit
ably rewarded by leaving same at Ad-
vertiser office. 1858
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
WANTED.

A GOOD BRIGHT OFFICE BOY.
Apply at Cation, Neill e Co., Queen
street. 5355
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09

Barometer corrected to 80 F. and
sea level, and after the LIST OF February
for standard gravity of Lat. As. This
correction is -.06 for Honolulu.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09

METEOROLOGICAL RECORD.
By the Government Survey, Published
Every Monday.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
WANTED.

BY a WOMAN OF EXPERIENCE
position as housekeeper or care OF
children; very best of reference Civ
en-. Address J. L., this Office. 1858
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
FOR RENT.

A 4-ROOMED FURNISHED COT
tage, situated near car line King street
Address NJ. A. s.. Advertiser office
1858
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
FOR RENT.

\ LARGE HOUSE CENTRALLY
located, suitable for boarding house
or small hotel, containing Ii rooms
and kitchen, 2 porcelain baths with hot
and cold water laid, and patent clos
cts; electric light throughout; newly
painted and papered. For further par
ticulars apply to
5325 GEAR, LANSING & co.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09
WANTED.

A GENTLEMAN DESIRES ETH
er furnished or unfinished room or
suite with bath (without board), in
central locality. Address p o. box
705, giving full particulars. 1856
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1899-10-09

The fine Passenger Steamers
This Port "a Hereunder:
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
HIS HEAD LIKES THE HEAT
But the Negro Always Tries to Keep
His Heels Cool.

But the Negro Always Tries to Keep
His Heels Cool.
1t has often been said that the ca
pacity Of the negro race for enduring
heat has never been fully tested. An
incident related by dairymar living
on the outskirts Of the city seems to
bear out this assertion.
This dairyman has young negro
boy who looks after the cattle and
does chores around the place. The on
ly effect that the heat produces in his
case is a desire to slumber. The dairy
man had young calf in the barnyard
and as the sun was pouring in on the
poor animal his wife sent "Carlna"
out to turn the calf loose, so that he
could seek shady spot. After wait
ing an hour for his return the house
wife went to the barnyard to investi-
gate. There she found both boy and
calf curled up in the hot and sitting
barnyard. The calf was dead from
the effects Of the sun, but the boy was
slumbering peacefully by it's side.
While negro can stand any amount
of heat on his head he loves to cool his
heels. 1t is a common sight in the
winter to see a negro boy on frosty
morning with his head bundled up to
keep out the cold and at the same time
walking unconcernedly along the
frosty ground in his bare feet. One Of
the hottest places in the city on hot
day is at the lumber wharfs of the
Florida Central and Peninsular rail-
road. When the men knock off for
noon, they frequently take nap with
their faces upturned to the rays of the
blazing sun. At the same time they
get their feet under the shadow Of
some friendly lumber pile.-Florida
Times Union.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
DOES oE TODAY.


Tobacco and beer are relished by a
dog in Belmont, o.
A Washington dog snaps at any one
who calls it nice doggie"
A Louisville man has little house
dog that chews gum with relish
A Vienna scientist has written a
learned article to prove that dogs
laugh.
In Lycoming county, Pa, kidnapped
dog lives with foxes that stole it by
force.
The Savoy hotel in Kansas City has
dog that acts as bellboy, going for
the mail and carrying notes to the
clerk.
A Mount Vernon, NJ Y, woman has
died as the result of vicious attack
by a Great Dane watchdog owned by
her husband
Angling is the favorite pastime of a
Rock Rapids, Ia, dog. 1t swims out
into the water and catches the fish in
its mouth.
There are three varieties of the dog
that never bark-the Australian dog,
the Egyptian shepherd dog, and lion
headed" dog of Thibet.
A Newfoundland dog guarding a
warehouse in Boston had to be dubbed
into submission by the firemen before
they could enter the building to extin-
glsh the fire.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
They Saw the Point.

An American farmer near Guadala-
jara convinced his Mexican neighbors
that oxen can do more work under
American yokes, so generally used in
the republic The American brought
several modern yokes from the United
States and used them with success.
The curiosity of his Mexican friends
was aroused, and they proceeded to
ask questions.
Well said the American, when
you lasso Il steer and the lasso gets
around his neck what do you do?'
Turn him loose" was the reply.
"Why?"
Because he's too strong for us that
way"
THAT'S it." answered the American.
His strength is in his neck, not in his
horns'
The MeXicans saw the point, and
now yoles of United States manufac-
ture are generally used in that neigh
borhood.-NIodern Mexico.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
Man and His TaiInr

advantage, tailors say, away from a
glass. Standing before mirror he is
almost certain to throw out his chest,
if he does not habitually carry it so,
and take an attitude that he would
like to have rather than the one he
commonly holds, whereas the tailor
wants him, as the portrait painter
wants his subject, in his natural pose
and manner. With the man in that at
titude the tailor can bring his art to
bear, If that is required, in the over
coming of any physical defect and pro-
duce clothes that will give the best at
talnable effect upon the figure as they
will be actually worn.-New York Sun,
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
Another Case of Superstition.

Nearly every passenger on the Long
Island railroad who has been COM
muter for one year or over has at one
time or another lost something that
has found its way to the information
bureau. More umbrellas are inquired
for than anything else. A farmer was
looking for one on Saturday. When
did you lose it?" asked the big, fat
manager. 1T wur bout ten days ago"
(which train? What day." THE
'leven clock night train, Thursday
night, a week ago. 1t wur left in the
smoker car con which division?"
North Shore. 1t had er straight han
die, rough like, an there wur tear
in it nigh the top" We've got thou
sand umbrellas here without names on
'em. Why don't people have 'em
marked?" He looked through large
book, went to the parcel room, picked
up an umbrella and began to examine
it. The farmer cried, That's it, that's
it! Open it up an see if there amt
tear" open an umbrella in the
house? Not on your life! Take it,"
Agricola fastened away, but was
called back to sign his name by way
of receipt.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
He Wanted a Com promise.

II General Joseph Wheeler does as
active fighting in the Philippines,
where he has recently been ordered,
as he did in the south during the civil
war, ne is apt to make his presence
felt. General Horace Porter tells the
following story, which is both true and
timely: 1t was about the middle of
the civil war when freshly appointed
colonel with newly enlisted regiment
joined the Union forces in the far
south. They were beautifully new, both
IN experience and in uniforms, and
they were very anxious to fight The
routine OF camp life drove them almost
to mut1ny. One bright October morn
ing word was received that a small
detachment of General Wheeler's cav
alrymen were on the other side of the
nil, and force started out in pursuit.
The next day the confederates were
reported miles distant in the opposite
direction. The third day the new colo
mel ana veteran brigadier started out
for a pleasure ride. A mile from
camp they rode into the fugitive con-
federates. who had been circling the
camp for week 1t was narrow es-
CAPE but they got away unframed
After 1t was over the general said to
the colonel:
Well. what do you think of war
now?"
rs Wheeler in this neighborhood
much of the time?" replied the colonel
evasively.
"All the time. He is here, there and
everywhere. What do you think of the
prospect?'
Well" answered the colonel, reflect
lively, Il wonder whether there isn't
some way this Internal thing can be
compromised"
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
One Child For Each Hour.

Henry Bloch, a business man OF
Brooklyn, eats breakfast at half past
Rosie, goes to breakfast at Is minutes
to Gabriel and retires for the night at
Achilles. Mr.. Bloch has u children,
9 girls and 3 boys. He is fond of his
family and in order that he might al
ways have them in mind had a watch
made with the miniature photograph
of one of the children in the place of
each Of the hours on it's dial. Thus
where the figure I would be on an or
binary watch dial the pretty face of
his daughter Rosie looks out. The face
of the boy Gabriel represents 1 o'clock,
that of Freda . o'clock and so on
around the dial At his home Mr..
Bloch has a large clock, on the dial of
which the figures are represented in
the same way.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
A Just Rebuke.

A young and newly married couple
were entertaining their friends, and
among the guests was one whose con-
tinued rudeness made him extremely
Objectionable to the rest of the COM
pany. His conduct, although most I'M
bearable, was put up with for some
time, until at supper he held up on his
fork a piece of meat which had been
served to him, and in vein of intend
ed humor he looked round and re-
marked:
SIS this pig?"
This Immediately drew forth the re-
mark from quiet looking individual
sitting at the other end of the table:
(Which end of the fork do you refer
to?-Spare Moments.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
An Absentminded bride groom.

Robert Dewar, brother of Lord Will
liam Dewar, the British scientist who
was the first eXperimenter to liquefy
air, is remarkably absentminded
man. 1t is said that on one occasion
he left his home early one morning
and repaired to the house of a friend,
in which there was a fine library to
which he had access. That afternoon
his relatives and friends searched the
neighborhood in vain for him. At
length he was run down in this library.
BY his side was a new suit of clothes.
It's nice man you are" ironically
said the spokesman.
whats the matter nowY returned
Robert irritably.
"Your bride and the preacher are
waiting for you this two hours. Don't
you know this is your wedding day,
man?"
81 declare" said the groom, ''I'd for
gotten all about it! Wait till 1 dress,
and I'll so along with you."-Saturday
Evening Post.
Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1899-10-19
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

Nine excuses out of a possible ten
are lies.
Talk is cheap-and much of it needs
to be discounted.
The less woman tries to be ir-
resistible the more she is.
Trouble drives fewer men to drink
than drink drives to trouble
A fair exchange is no robbery-and a
fair robbery is no exchange.
The man who hesitates before re-
plying to query is always doubted.
You have probably noticed that only
level-headed people agree with you.
The man who talks in his sleep dis
plays his wisdom by remaining a
bachelor
Some men are like cigars-the more
you puff tfem the smaller they be-
come.
Make it an object for them and some
men can plainly see that black is white.
Chicago Daily News.