The Providence news. (Providence [R.I.]) 1891-1906, 1899-03-10

guest Of some friend at her club lunch
con or breakfast 1 went, ate and was
fllled-with papers and talks and bouil-
Ion and croquettes. That was all right
Then there was n change. 1t got to the
point that, at a certain stage OF the
game, the president OF the club would
get up and say: Ladies. we have with
us this afternoon a number OF friends.
and, as j am sure you would all like To
Know who they are. the secretary will
now read the names.
That wasn't bad at all ] can't say
that my bosom didn't swell with pride
To hear my fun name announced with
flourish. But things didn't end there.
Pretty soon the president stopped call
ing us friends, and referred 10 us as
guests. Then we developed into dis
tinguished guests. That title became
Immediately popular and one of the
freakish habits of almost all woman's
clubs now is To read long list of Wis
itors under the heading OF distin-
guished guests
Not long after this title came into
fashion an enterprising club president
had the brilliant idea OF asking each of
the distinguished guests To rise when
her name was called. The secretary
would announce: Mrs. Myrtle Green
Pepper. Then l would get UP and
stand there. feeling like several kinds
hundred women were guying me i'm
their inmost souls. | always felt as IL
the president held me up as IL she were
showing an insect TO class In natural
history. Still i made the best of It.
and by getting only about halfway up
and then subsiding promptly, ! short
ened the agony as much as possible.
This rising for inspection has been the
fashion for some time. but the other
day / had an experience which showed
me that the distinguished guest bust
ness is capable Of almost unlimited de-
velopment.
Il had been invited TO go to the lunch-
con of well-known club and 1 found
myself. as usual, one OF half dozen or
more visitors. After the bouilion and
croquettes part OF the program was
over the president got up and began the
old, familiar formula: Ladies, we have
number of distinguished guests here
present with us today, and it gives me
great deal of pleasure To have the sec
retary read their names
Then the secretary began Mrs
Margaret Smith Brown, Mrs. Myrtle
One moment, interrupted the pres
ident i Will request that each lady rise
and bow when her name Us called
And bow! That was new wrinkle.
sat there wondering how in the world
/ could do II without adding a shrek
w
asininity OF getting up and making a bow
as IL you were little school girl about
To say piece. III she had said for us
to rise and turn handspring |
couldn't have ben more confused. Wen.
the secretary again began with Mrs.
Brown. who got up and made her little
bow. | knew my turn was coming next
and. az | was I'm the middle of the room.
with women To right Of me. to left of
me and behind me- | wondered whether
] would be requested 10 make four bows
or would be let Off with one. l made
one and dropped into my seat, and the
secretary passed ON.
Now. ! tell YOU the distinguished
guests of Womens clubs have a great
career before them. The bow is but the
beginning. Next they will bc requested
to rise. bow and turn slowly on one
foot. This Will give the spectators a
comprehensive view of the distin-
guished guests. back as well as front.
After that they will probably be asked
TO rise, revolVe. and give various
other detailed expressions To this may
be added an injunction 10 bring with
them typewriter biographical data.
After "a while they can be asked Ia
bring also typewritten descriptions Of
the gown, and hat worn, stating cost.
ana anything else of
interest. Don't you scep There's no
limit to H. Now. IL you think YOU
would object To being "A distinguished
guest under such advanced conditions. |
urge YOU to take Your turn at IL now
when YOU can get off with the iniunc-
tion To- make 81 pretty bow to the la
dies The wheels of progress are NOV
ing. and the distinguished guest is be-
ing hurried 90 unknown antics. New
York sun.