The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-07-16
THE PIG WAS THERE. SURE ENOUGH.
a Showman's Prize, as to Which Nature
Was OBLIGED to Draw tho Line.

Was Obliged to Draw tho Line.
II was jogging my horse along slow and easy
one day on the edge Of the Allegany oil field.
near Bolivar" said John Gilbert. the travelling
groccryman when | saw standing under
tree by the roadside n tall. lank slabsided man.
His back was toward the road, and he was
Ecsticulating over IA wooden box that lay on a
stump in front Of him. as il he were making
speech. The road was dusty. and the man was
SO absorbed in what he was doing that he did
not hear the horse or wagon as | drew near.
and pulled up only rod or so away from him.
Then discovered that he was. in fact making
n speech.
Ladies' and gentlemen he was saying.
with sonorous twang. IL | han't got pig in
this here box that's got four eyes. with two OF
'em lookin' crossways. besides havin setch in
cdental talent as eight legs. four ears. and
two tails. I'll make you philopeny present OF
it. I've got the pig. and it's right here in this
box. along with it's four eyes, two of EN- look
in crossways, its eight legs. four ears two tails
and all, If any of you ladies and gentlemen
has got five cents worth Of curiosity you can
git red Of it by walkin' right up and seem
whether I've got the pig hid in this here box.
or whether | ought to 20 back to my native
hills a branded provaricator. Five cents. ladies'
and gentlemen! Half a dime"
The man PAUSED. peeked into the box
through an aperture in the top. which had IA
slide over it. kept his eyes there a moment and
then resumed:
Ladies' and gentlemen. maybe you don't
wish to see this pig with four eyes, two Of EN-
crossed. because of a lngcrin fear that I'll
play glass eye or two on you. Far from it,
Every one o them four eyes is smon-pure.
born with-t-n article. If there's a glass eye
among 'cm you kin have 1t for watch charm
III
o glass eyes. maybe it's wooden legs you're
fi 6nt MoT ladies' and gentIsmen. do
crarkn' it ur as moral SHOVE DO I-thank
The man drew the slide. waved his hand
toward it and bowed. Just as il he were receiv-
alleged TO be in the box. The movements in
doing this made him aware, Of the fact that he
an no me- toward
h Mp HI, I'm En- Foin the county {a! next
Al right Two Of EN- crossed; Eight legs.
And I'm Goin to turn it into BARI o money noy
t got this here rig down yender n Pennsyl,
sort: hut Vas i9ofin round Hoi for good '%i
farm. They had been braggin' whole
oum h GS aa dorm SCrnss hef ha, %
six foot Ave inches high. and raised 9 patch o
his farm $50 an acre cause it could grow
and almost bought the place when what does
le ,t sl"epers farm do but come to the front
il nine foot from the ground. each ear
inches $40 long Ths price no
that was Gon,, to buy, jim sloeum's
place fr2ze on to SleeTer's. 0ld Dayey Jolls he
corn nor taters nor raspberries on his farm.
and so he couldn't put up the price Of his land.
buy me a snug farm to settle down on and
heerd that the Jolls place could be bought way
below What farms was bcin' held at down that
in the mir and his farm marked way up above
~" How,s this; farmer" says to Jolls.
Ths HoT Sv this rh he says Ii swe,Iin out
''tater vines and their tall cornstalks and their
towerin raspberry bushes" he says. but have
they got the d farm ,nat turn ont
eyes. and two Of ,'em crossed at that2 II they
have" he says, then they kin ask as much
doin,', pigs like them
".,"nne come last night he says.
"'"Then sposcc you won't take six thou
IVY" Pooh, d he says. Ten thousand is my
-. Farmer" says, I'm give you seven"
Ten or nothin'l " he SAYS.
III go you eight" | says.
Ten. or don't waste your BREATH" he
. Nine I'll give YOU" I says, and that's my
- Ten thousand dollars, and not cent
less 9"ys ,mT @GGrnf,G ip farm ne Says
use tryin to git up decker for the Jolls place.
J got, got down the road niece and then an idea
another hack, | led him out behind the cow
80 Farmer" SAYS, will you take so cents
for the eight legged mig ?"
The old Teller thought it over minute
."."Yes, by thumrs will he says.
land bought tn the eight, legged pig, ladies'
two, Of EN- crossed, two tails, and go
wagon and saying i Hat woGd E Ike to TAKE
., Itll be 1--WE cents he said, Half dime.
II handed him, a nickel,
Thank you" he said. Pass your eyes
~" lie drew the slide and passed my eyes in.
I'M, mhG inur;Syrd pig was there sure enough
and! preserved in . two-Gallon Jar of spirits,
You We. got the pig said !. but it seems
to mo that it would suit the public better il it
man, snn it T bt re The LA. Spn sn G
us everything there is. II she's Kind enough
to give Us twice as many legs and eyes and
to kick cause she overlooked the trlhin' mat
ter o putin breath into us. Natur' Is kind.
but she's got to draw the line somewhcrcs. A
pig with as many, cxtrys as this uns got
ought 10 be thanklu to le red of the trouble
that his twO-legCcd and two-Nyed brethren
and sts'ern, hnrdoned with life md big appe-
tiles for swll, has got TO tumble into
There was log Q and uhil osophy in this CON
cIuspn, aud ] nodded my head. got back into
my wagon and iroye, on. The tall lank. slab,
sided man resumed his rehearsal, and the last
! heard him say was
land that's how | got this four-eyed mig.
with eight legs fonr ars and two tails ladies'
and gentlemen, with two eyes crossed that I've
got here in this box. Don't crowd. please.
on kin al see It fer half a dime A nickel.
Five cents"
DislocRted His Liver.
From The Thiidd 'iDhid Time.
Daniel NIacgoIgen has the distinction Of being
the third in the records Of st. AGness Hosuital
To meet with peculiar sort Of accident, He is
m iccman and lives at 2l22 Dickinson street.