Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1899-04-29
Mr.. JOBSON'S EXPERIMENT

| Ing about a month ago. we've got too ex-
| pensive house on our hands. There are
| only two of u.s. and we're hogging enough
| space for a big family. Get roomer for
| the second-story front. It'll help to pay the
| rent, and one roomer won't be any trouble"
Mrs Jobson looked thoughtful Her &C
| simultaneously with Mr.. Jobson extends
| over long period of years.
| I'm sure that you wouldn't like a
| roomer--' she began
Get somebody to take that second STORY
| front room, Mrs. Jobson,'' said Mr.. Jobson.
| in stern tone Il know all about what
| you are going to say-that you need eight
| big rooms, not to mention the basement,
| for your own use, and all that sort of
J thing. It's hard. know but you'll have to
! squeeze yourself into six seven rooms
But I'm perfectly confident that you
wouldn't get along with
Il can get along with anybody. Mrs. Job
son" said he. Just because you yourself
have never sounded the depths of my
amiable, simple. frank nature, you cher
ish the erroneous idea that I'm hard to
get along with. Just you get a roomer for
that second-story front, and you'll see how
l get along with her
"Her?" said Mrs. Jobson, in a surprised
tone.
Yes. her repeated Mr.. Jobson. Il don't
want any plaster-haired Wilie-boy around
my house. Want some nice. quiet, settled
woman to take that room. OF course, L
wouldn't turn her away from my door if
she happened to be good-looking." he added
maliciouSly.
Mrs. Jobson saw that it wasn't any use to
demur, and SO. three days later, second
story front roomer was installed. Spinster.
not far from forty, exceedingly thin. in
office. Mr.. Jobson didn't meet her at all
before she was installed, but after dinner
his reading of the evening paper was some
what interfered with by the weird strains
which came from the piano Square. and Of
the vintage of So approximately in the
second-story front. The strains were of the
most elementary sort, the notes being
picked out one by one. The second-floor
front practiced in this wise from 5 until
o'clock, and by that time Mr.. Jobson had
read a great many of the days dispatches
a number of times without getting any
sense out of them. and had eaten his finger
nails close to the quick
Whats the matter, dear?" Mrs. Jobson
asked him several times. but ne only
garded her with expression of deep
proach.
The next morning. around o'clock,
while Mr.. Jobson was dreaming that he had
just finished paying for a $1,000 house, he
was awakened by more elementary music
from the second-story front. If Mrs. job
son had not long been accustomed to with
ering looks she might have been shriveied
by the glances which Mr.. Jobson bestowed
upon her While those matutfnal diScordS
from above were being hammered out. But
he said nothing, although he was exceed
ingly thoughtful at breakfast
Inc tnump-tnulnp practlClnS only lasted
from 8 until I o'clock that evening, but
this seemed to be quite long enough for Mr..
Jobson, who spent the final hour of it in
vain attempt at reading his newspaper up
side down. AT Z O'Clock, right after the
cessation of the music the voice of the
second-story front was heard over the BAN
listers.
Mrs. Jobson," said the voice, have you
Why no." said Mrs. Jobson, going to
the foot Of the stairs. Il didn't know that
you had pair
Well" said the voice. they We're in my
room when | left it this morning and l
can't find them anywhere now"
There was lot of suspicion in the tone,
and Mr.. Jobson looked go wrathy that Mrs
Jobson afraid he would say something
right out loud
Say" said he when Mrs. Jobson return
ed to the sitting room. dye suppose for a
minute that she thinks you swfped those
scissors and pawned them for the price
of couple of ice cream sodas?'
''Sh-sh." said Mrs. Jobson. She'll hear
you"
Il don't care continental whether she
does or not" said Mr.. Jobson, raising his
voice. Dye think I'm going to let people
call you thief in so many words?'
Mrs. Jobson smoothed that over. But
she couldn't smooth the practicing over.
On the third evening the second-story
front took her music lesson. 1t was pro-
tracted seance. 1t was just about over
when young woman friend of the second
story front appeared to take her music les
son on the second-story fronts piano. She
didn't have any piano of her own, the poor
thing, and so the second-f1oor front had
kindly invited her to avail herself of her
vintage of IS piano upon which to take
lessons and practice. Nothing of this, how
ever had been mentioned in advance to the
JobSon family. 1t was about 10 O'Clock
that night before the tin-panny din from
the secOnd-fioor front ceased, and by that
| time Mr.. Jobson was walking up and down
the sitting room, wearing holes in the car
I isti hli in iGt q
knots.
Does the music annoy you, my dear?"
Mrs. Jobson had asked him.
"Musicr almost shouted Mr. JobSon.
Music, Dye call that-annOy me? Why,
l fatten on it, If it lasts another week I'll
be fat that l won't be able to waddle!
The next morning the perfume of fried
onions floated downstairs from the second
story front before the Jobsons were astir.
Where's that smell coming from?' in
quircd Mr.. Jobson.
The second-story front is preparing her
breakfast" replied Mr.. JobSon.
Ten minutes later the voice of the second
floor front heard over the banisters.
Mrs. Jobson," the voice inquired, has
my jar of milk been left at the basement
door this morning? Yes? Well will you
kindly hand it up to me-?
Mr.. Jobson sat up in bed, aghast.
Say" he yelled, dye mean to say that
YOU re waiting on that
"Sh-sh-sh She'll hear you,' said Mrs.
Jobson.
Shortly after o'clock, While the JoDSonS
were at breakfast, the second-tloor front
came down TO the basement before going
out, and deliberately locked the wheels of
her bicycle.
What did she do that for?" inquired Mr..
Jobson, when the roomer had gone.
We'll, she probably fears that, my wheel
being not quite so new as hers, might be
tempted during her absence to
Ride it, hey?" said Mr.. Jobson. well,
tell you one thing, Mrs. Jobson-you got
me roped into this thing. but it's all over
now, and it's not a-going to happen again
You can just serve one week notice on
that-er-roomer, and the next time you
take occasion to ding-dong it into me that
this house is too big for our comfort, and
get me TO consent to having 1t f1lled up
with a lot of dancing dervshes and bowling
RedIamites why, l want you to send me a
Dostal card that's all I'm pretty yield
ing, but that's one proposition that you
won't make stick with me any more, and
YOU hear me a-talking!
Amende Honorable.
From the Chicago Tribune.
You had an item this morning IN your
paper, sir said the rough-looking caller