The Anaconda standard., 1899-01-01

eHtciIiio II lie IlltuG d ldldl IliStd&e
He put AggieG gun down outside the
door Two minutes later Aggie was
patrolling his post his gun on shoul-
der, the picture of an alert and faithful
sentry. At the same moment the Off
Ger of the guard was instructing the
corporal of the guard to arrest him.
Duly arrested. Aggie was escorted to
the state room.
Corporal" said the officer sternly
when Aggie confronted him. put this
man in the guardhouse to await trial
for neglect of duty and losing his gun
But he has his gun" ventured the
corporal.
For a moment the officer looked stag
gered and the MS aid contemptuosly:
1T is some other mans gLn.'
1T is my own" said Aggie firmly.
do not add lies to your other
crimes exclaimed the officer sternly.
Corporal, bring the first sergeant Cf
this mans company and his gun rec
ord
The first sergeant came.
Sergeant said the officer, ''What is
the number of this mans gum
''Steen hundred and 'steen, sir
Corporal, what is the number of the
gun you found in this mans possession
when you arrested him?'
'Steen hundred and 'steen, sir
The officer gasped. He compared the
| HlilSeI. 1lcH Ilt SldilCSu Out-
side the stateroom door Then he sat
in chair for awhile and fiddled his fin
gers. Finally he said:
MY man, you may go back to your
post But beware. sir, beware!'
You see," said Aggle, later. he
couldn't afford to admit that he had
| been as big a chump about the gun
as l had. Whenever he meets me now
he looks at me with a red-like and in
| quirin' eye
The only iced water on the Vigilancta
| was in tank in the officers cabin.
Strict orders had been issued that no
enlisted men should drink thereof,
under penalties most severe. The order
| was a formal one and had been type
written and pasted up right beside the
| tank. Aggie's dry throat thirsted for
a drink of the forbidden fluid. One
warm day when he thought the coast
clear he lodged into the cabin door,
| grabbed the glass and turned the
spgot. Just as the glass was brimful
| the ponderOus figure of a certain staff
officer loomed up beside him. Aggie
took in the situation in flash. He
made no move to drink the water but
reached for the toothbrush in his hat
band.
How dare you drink that water,
sir?'' demanded the irate staff officer.
I'm not drinking it, SIR responded
| Aggie waving the toothbrush in sa
| lutte.
You We're going to drink it, sir"
II beg your pardon responded the
impassive Aggie, politely but firmly.
Il was not going to drink it.
Then, sir, what were you doing with
ito"
Il was going" said Aggie, holding
the drinking glass out in one hand and
the toothbrush in the other, to brush
my teeth in it,
Good heavens, sir!" gasped the staff
officer, his features picture of horror,
that is worse than drinking it,"
II know it is" said Aggie, but" and
he pointed with his toothbrush to the
typewriter order, ''it isn't against or
ders."
Then he stepped out on the guard,
and before the stunned staff officer
could recover his wits to protest, had
calmly brushed his teeth, replaced the
glass, and disappeared. I'd
This was by no means Aggies last
encounter with the same staff officer.
Aggie was a born speculator. He. was
a high roller and would bet his boots
off his feet on a bobtail flush without
the culver of an eyelid. The ship was
fourteen days on the trip from Tampa
to Siboney, and during the voyage 'Ag-
gle fluctuated between affluence, and
| abject poverty. There We're days when
he possessed practically the entire
available cash assets of the regiment.
There were other. days when he put
up his jackEnife as. security for a
quarter to get in a game. Now, the
staff officer referred to was a perss-
tent enemy and prosecutor of every
man who aspired to accumulate wealth
through the agency of cards and dice.
He instituted raid after raid on the
games, and one by one the gamblers
were thrust into the guardhouse. there
| to ito TO hpir CT tint htp
was, as he put it, "cagey,' and it was
not until the seventh day out that his
capture and imprisonment were achiev-
ed. Then the staff officer folded his
hands over his plump corporati ton
heaved a sigh of relief and said:
Now I've got him. That ends the
gaming on this boat
Alas for human hopes. On the follow
ing day he visited the guard house tC
see if his victims were properly con-
trite. Sad to relate, the first thing that
greeted the parsons eye in the guard
house was flourishing game of STUD
poker, with Aggie acting as banker ant
dealer. Then he gave it up.
When the list dashed up San Juar
Hill, raggedly but bravely-a company
here and a fragment of battalio,
there-the foremost man in his compa
ny was Aggie. Up the hill swept hi
company, over its crest and $50 yard
| down the opposite lncilne IN support @
! Grimes battery. Just at barhed Wir
} fence, a hundred yards in advance o
: the line where the American intrench
ments were located that night, Aggi
got in line with one of the enemy
t rapid-fire guns. Five minutes later
| lmping painfully over the crest of th
t hill, the blood streaming from half
dozen wounds, Aggie passed his zap
| tain.
"Hit?" asked the captain.
"They've p-p-peppered me, captain'
he suffered with his never-failini
smile, Into regular p-p-pepper box.
That evening at the division hospita
they patched Aggie up the best the.
| could, rolled him in a blanket and lef
him to lie there and gaze up at th
stars. He had limped and crawled fiv
= miles with the blood streaming from
, his wounds and he must have beer
weak as a sick kitten. But as the even
ing wore on a tremulous tenor voic'
lifted itself in that place of pain ant
: death and began to sing familiar songs