davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
The Yale Presidency.

From the Springfield (Mas.J Republican.
The Yale Alumni Weekly. after much con-
sultation with Yale alumni throughout tie
country finds that the graduate body Is
substantially agreed that the new president
Of the university should have the following
qualifications:
A natioral reputation.
A Yale diploma
Youth.
Those qualifications cons titute a sine qua
| non. 1t appears. But there are other quail
f~ications which the Yale alumni demand.
although with less unity. Here are some
OF them:
Strong human sympathy.
Magnetic. stimulating influence.
Orthodox religious views.
An ins pirer of reverence.
Strong religious nature.
Expert in pedagorics.
Highly developed administrative talent.
Marked financial acumen.
And. finally. he must be found at once
and placed in office without delay.
Persons who see Yale only from the out
side will conclude that the Yale alumni do
not want much of a man. They want the
superhuman- For example. II the Almighty
should consent to u special creation for
| the Yale presidency to suit the desires Of
Yale graduates. he would have to combine
il one being the best qualities of such
men as William Mckinley, Timothy vigil
Theodor. Roosevelt. Bishop Potter, Dwight
l.. Moody. Rev. Mr.. Joseph Cook. G. Stan
ley Hall. John Wananaker and the late
jay Gould. With President McEinley's
national reputation. DIR. Dwight's Yale
training. Governor Roosevelt's youth. Bis
hop Potter's human sympathy. MIR. Moody's
magnetic influence. Joseph Cocks orthodox
religion. President Halls pedaSogios. Mr..
Wanamaker's department. store admins
trative talent and Mr.. Gould's keenness in
finance. it is possible that a college presi-
dent could lie created that would satisfy
the Yale spirit"
Everyone hopes that Yale will find such
a MIN. 1t Is possible. however. that some
OF the qualities mentioned will have to be
sacrificed. Perhaps even one OF those three.
regarded by all the alumni as absolutely
essential Will have to be sacrificed. Now
If Yale can find a man combining Messrs.
Dwight. Roosevelt. Potter. Moody. Cook.
Hail. Wanamaker and Gould. with Nj.
Mckinley left out. she would do we'll TO
secure him. A human being possessing all
desirable qualities except national reputa-
ton would be a good investment as a col
lege president. We guarantee thai with
in Two years. such u man would have all
the reputation hat Yale could possibly
need. There is the president Of Harvard.
Did he have national reputation when
chosen to his present Office? DR.. Eliot
was q rather obscure professor Of chemistry
when called to the Office he now holds
with such success and power.
The chances are that II the nan Yale
wants exists he has no national reputation.
II he had one. 1t would be impossible Sor
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

about , In the morning. he said: Toll
those fellows II they have anyone who
knows how to run the Globe Democrat bet
ter than 1t Is run. to send him to me and
i will nay him a rare salary The only
interview I ever had with ]. b. MccuIlagh
was ended"
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

Ysse 10 get hims OWING to N trevious en-
Rakement,. Just a. o o a. such remark
able become nst,onaI figures
they are found to be already snapped up
by destiny. or professional ties, or some
railroad corporation. at an enormous sal
ary. The way TO secure the exclusive serv-
ices OF a genius is to discover him, Is
the stage managers say Of new actors, and
the publishers Of new authors. And you
must discover" him early.
Provided that the rest Of the ideal presi-
dent be found. the quality OF national prom
inence may safely be left out. We hasten
to say. however. that none Of the other
qualities should be lacking In the college
president Of the twentieth century-poor
man. That Is evident from the modest
demand OF the Yale alumni
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

The closing OF the nineteenth century and
s~apaa0ng OF the twentieth will be marked
Nnn unusual number OF great fairs and
GUpcdtIo0s. The first OF these will be the
sQDon&sr American" exposition At. Omaha
fnom July ! to November 1 OF the present
s1Uss. Il n to be held In the same build
80 uad by the trans-Mississippi EXPOSE
sGoa, and In some respects will be a con-
VI >nnetaon q that enterprise. Exhibits from
TT nsw lnsulsr possessions will be a spe-
alleefxre. or. -.
fH3goeably the most important undertaking
t&lhs kjld VII. b the centennial celebra-
~ e the Louisiana purchase. to be held
o. u Louis. preparations for which are
eoeAy under way in the preliminary stage.
SdDn1cubtsdly this viii be he most inter.
eeQag md inpEessave Of the great fairs now
nE1)ectod. especially to Inc people of the
concerned. st. Louis business men
%aNon Uiedgs themselves for . sufficient sum
- 1nsare. with the aid Of congress. the
ncnsM OF the enterprise.
11n.1n. at Buffalo. N. Y. WIN DO held the
4en.American expedition, said to have been
1deUlnally conceived by James G. Blaine.
- ~ the people Of Ohio will celebrate
y tp1sdo the one-hundredth anniversary Of
- a1mission Of their state to the Union.
- appropriation Of $4,000 in its behalf
Efgag already been made by congress. In
nyssext year. Warrington city viii cell
the establishment of the federal gov
IN the District of Columbia.
0eAae fairs now under consideration are
- weaan's Industrial exhibit ut Wash
S1ngtea and the Commercial exposition Al
v1GAdelphia- Besides these expeditions in
.511m5ca. the United States wiz be largely
s{N4ss6ted IN the great worlds exposition
'lpb = held In Paris in lsao. for which con
Hyls has appropriated over t1.oe. 0oo.
Centennial expositions. with their exhibits
$500 ptoducts OF our industries. have their
~ I the economies OF the country and
their lesson Of freedom and prog
IL ~
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
Followed the Doctor. Adsice.

From the Boston Transcript.
Justice-"What have you to say In an
swer to the charge OF stealing this mans
plank walk?"
The accused-.I took II by advice Of my
physician. yer honor. He told me to take
a long walk every day. This was the FIRST
long walk I saw to-day. and Of course I
took it"
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
SPRING.

Too we'll I know you. Spring. and % FestrstA
Ny foolish muse from all such aattsrings vain
As mild and ''gentle"-iest ] b repaid,
Even n Aarsyas Of old. md dayed.
This time BY Icy hail and cutting slssG
Instead-r pray your going nay b 1sse
That soon I may forget and drovss vay
My WEAKNESS beneath Dear summer sway.
Oliver HEREFORD in ScrthoarA
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
OCEAN CAnLEs AND CoMuEncE-

+ The bureau OF statistics of the treasury
department. has included in its last
monthly summary q valuable treatise Upon
the Submarine and Land Telegraphs Of
the World" showing their location. num-
Der. length. service. cost and history. A
vast amount Of data has been arranged
and Classified. making a monograph of most
usefu. reference. Most impressive has been
the effect of submarine telegraphy upon
commerce. In 1866. the year when cable
communication between the United States
and Europe was successfully established,
our commerce with Europe amounted to
$G52 81. 2S9. In 1895 this had
reached the enormous sum of s1,s47.5 81 ,Ssi.
The commerce of the islands Of Asia and
OceaEica adjacent to the Philippines
amounts to s2.0to. Oo0. 900 a year. OF their i'm
ports of ! 0e.O0o.0O a month. the United
States supplies less than 6 er cent, although
these imports include many articles manu-
factured In this country. The inference is
obvious that a trans-Pacific cable. together
with the Nicaragua n and the ,encour-
aGement Of our merchant marine, would
secure US a larger share of this enormous
Oriental market, with the Philippines as
a center of distribution and supply.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
Plain Corollan.
From Tit-Bits

From Tit-Bits.
The pupils in a school were asked to give
In writing the difference between a biped
and a quadruped. One boy gave the fol-
lowing:
"A biped has two legs and-a quadruped
has four legs: therefore the difference be-
tween u biped and a quadruped Is two
legs"
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

General Otis continues to do business or
the veni. vidi. vici principle. and the work
of compulsory civilization goes grandly on.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

General Miles has not gone so far as to
represent that the canned maggots had a
stunted and starved appearance from eat
ing the beef.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

Perhaps the difficulty in Cuba could be
smoothed away by counting the members
Of the assembly as soldiers. In the distri-
button.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

However. Mr.. Croker is confident in the
belief that a genuine Jeffersonian banquet
can be pulled of without the assistance
Of a boy orator.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

1t is reported that the climax Of the
struggle with the Fiiipinos is about to be
reached. Can it be that Mr.. Hoar is going
to surrender?
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
HI. stock In Trade.

From Puck.
She-"I hear he has more money than
brains"
He-"well, he needs II In his business"
She-"What's his bus.ness?"
He-"Looking for a wife"
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
EDITORIAL NOTES.

The Missouri legislature will enter to-day
upon another week of doing nothing Of any
particular consequence
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

Ex-Governor Altgeld has published a
book, and there is no longer any excuse
for those who are struggling along without
In Altgeid surfeit.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

to grind down the common people, as Mr..
Bryan has SO often assured us. the Money
Power is proving itself wretchedly incom-
petent.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
During THE WEEK ENDING MARCH

Weather Forecast fer Monday.
WARRINGTON. March ls.-For okiahcma and ID
esan Territory: Fair; south wisds.
Pr Asksnsas: Fair: variable winea. =
Ha Iowa and Missouri: Fair: north winds.
Fog Kansas and Nebraska: Fair: variable v1nda
F6 Colorado: Fair: winds becoming eas,eriy.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

After the fumes Of the wine had disap-
peared. British statesmen discovered that
Ambassador Choate's speech contained a
great deal more sparkling eloquence than
fraternal sentiment.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

Notwithstanding the Infamous attempts
Of the plutocrats to eEbarrass him by a
general increase of wages, Mr.. Bryan con-
tinues to talk good old orthodox hard times
straight from the shoulder.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

David B.. Hills announcement tina he
will have nothing more to do with moss
back politics is not alarming. He CAM
swing a jimmy vigorously enough to break
into any influential place in Republican
politics.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

Just before this fated country strikes bot
tom in its downward plunge to expansion
destruction Mr.. Carnegie should take
passage for Scotland. There is no obliga-
ton resting on Mr.. Carnegie to remain and
be smashed up with a country that is too
pigheaded to follow his guidance.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

'Ute out vit
: attended q
!, good. fala
Tly relieve
70 facs and
sp6rriuys vi
Z tdss told
. treating 4
daughter
RxAspiEi
n RHY0
roknovthat
IriCURA. pi
lord instant
ay.ournips.
END scalp.
b 70 fNl I'd
mort ed
~sef and rel
oAe.Pesdy1
WA Houu
G~A0}
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

Chicago high-salaried preachers are NOV
ing to New York to obtain higher salaries.
but Chicago is not to be given over wholly
to wickedness nevertheless. Evangelist
Moody begins a series OF meetings there
this week. and Evangelist Moody has quite
a batting record.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
-
an
- Id
lAA1
We
. sh|
.1ss
NSe|

20 hear tn
NIPPON. has
said an
a great
has bee
>shrs
the
:. and
:. II
h
ted |
81 ye
stan
At in
and 7
, this
neve
Il sue
o best
and
when
> in Z
cope "
Dynsk
fought
fighters
the
pfomisin
1Or once
- lookin
!. Unlike
"a from tn
Gee. which
q frugal LIN
~erty in
1isOrnia. ha
comfortable
!. where he
II light
anu
he
Til'
Gaile
Ruhl
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

either directly chargenble or incident to tho
war with Spain. and tE.oco.co more can be
charged 70 the Increasing needs Of tho kov.
ernmcnt. Tho Increase In the regular APP
propNAttons includes:
Pensions ........ ...$ 4N00.0O
Postal service ......"":..... ie.ooo.oN
Rivers, and harbors, including
work under contract previously.
authorized ....... ............. 100000
New hip for the navy........ 6.0eO.0o0
NeRinninE twelfth census ........ l.0O.0V0
Paris exposition ...-....-...... H. O.S go
New -sptlblic buildings. Including a.
the huilding. for sthe depast.
merit Of justice. and for slterI.f
and partial construction OF the.
now government printing Of ...
lice, about ,-... ..........s. 6.00o,0 90
Payment 81 judgments rendered
against the government on ac-
count Of French %spoliatipns
and under the Bowman act. 3.f0c. oo0
These eight items alone cover more than
the apparent difference between expendi-
lures OF the Fifty-iifth congress. with the
war expenses deducted. and the Fifty
fourth. and none OF them show any wanton
recklsssness In the use OF public funds.
As for the war expenditures. aggregating
near half a billion. the Democracy can have
su the comfort It can get from attacking it.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

II 1t is true that President Mckinley and
Speaker Reed are to get together at Thorn
asville. Ca, to-day for the purpose Of
agreeing on a policy Of harmony and CO.
operation. the verification of the report
will be most gratifying. With these big
leaders working at c~ross-purposes. the in
terests of both the Republican party and
the country will necessarily suffer. 1t will
he pleasant to know that the president and
the speaker are too good Republicans and
too broad patriots to permit such a sacri-
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

A correspondent writes that "the init
nation that Jackson county's deficit will
be Offset by the next train robbery is a
vile SANDER" The correspondent is proba-
bly, right. The gang is not in the habit
of making good one of its steals with the
proceeds of another. The haul from the
next train robbery will doubtless be dis
posed of in the usual way and the hole in
the county treasury go unplugged. Any
intimation to the contrary is an unfair re-
Election on the gangs business methods.
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
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Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

day event.
Yer and v
asker and
Tvs. ii. e
yeesler an
vi. Cook
Casey
''sand Lyle
@day ey
y. Pottery
& evening
I'm mn n
'OlfeIman
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20
IDePs a.

"Hb !"
Ilarch 49,
y troop. V
.y games
~tch be
lrrow.|
'Ort Fl
!. Cal
j : sixd
q quart
.AHlent
.iiiery,|
D Hamiltl
!. OF Ldeu
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

From the Springfield (Mas.) Republican.
The Yale Alumni Weekly. after much con-
sultation with Yale alumni throughout the
country. finds that the graduate body Is
substantially agreed that the new president
OF the university should lave the following
qualifications:
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

Defeats
March 10.
agreed {,
Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1899-03-20

AsS SaN" SAh y IhdhV "HS ltlIItS-
sion upon the back" NY monologue last
ed for more than an hour. Certainly I
talked until 1 was out OF talk. and got not
the Slightest response. not even an indica-
ton that l was heard by the owner of the
massive-looking back Immediately in my
what I should do next. 1t seemed wise to
do nothing and. lighting a cigar. I COM
posed myself as well as / could upon a
most upright and uncompromising chair,
and waited for results. 1 was satisfied
something would happen; my language had
been TOO plain. and he must nave heard.
I did not fear personal violence. I was
closer to tie door. but I confess l was
thinking how my name would last, with
the rolling years. along with other rare
specimens gathered from the clergy and
other ranks Of life. and forever embalmed
and preserved by Mr.. McCulIagh in the
columns OF the Globe-Democrat in purest
English. 1t was not a pleasant half hour.
At last the back turned and Mr.. Nc
Cullagh. rising. looked at his watch and
remarked It was nearly midnight and we
had better be going. Arriving OF the street.
l noticed a buggy at the curb. and Mack"
invited me TO ride with him 10 the res
taurant and eat something. as he was in
the habit of doing AT this hour. At the
restaurant. having given an order to the
waiter. he turned to me and inquired II I
would take something to drink. I felt the
need Of whisky. and said so. From that
lime until he again entered his buggy Mr..
McCullaEh talked and l listened Never
a word did he say about the message I
had given him.. As ] bade him farewell,
The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1899-09-01
MAKE A DEFINITE FINISH.

Itisevident that tho adn,,;s
,r,,;o, aoos no, nr,no..
80. ~ ,n"" " x" !"
10 tue campaign OF iSVV win the
handicap of the Philippine war i'm
periling it's chances OF success n
# il posslble 10 remove the hand.
oo, h, mo.ns ,f a NOR. .;,.
o'r 30 n.N. ,..' s"'o"'
or 'h'e"'gep' management OF the
situation.
The new proposition to estab.
lisb a rigid blockade of nj, phil,n.
ni,o ,or,s ;,o,,a;,o Mil, ,.,
r'"0 WV"
ne reopen'pg VI tue campaign al
'"e c'osc " 'ne we, season indl
ca'ss ."a' s'e'n e"or, ~ 'he I'm
'neu'a'e suPP'es''o" vi we Agul'
',", , U. ore"h ~ 10 DC made
:" &c A"o' 'oS" "'py vi .V'oVo
soIu'' eN0ee"'"s any co'oni"'
'o'o .',, y, years 10 the
~ Sa ssVs C S",e 'na ,, enp'oy
GU ~ 90" :" O"o" WI" '"en oe
aNa ,, w ~" "perauohs
,-a 's;,, ha su'""uS , coas'
80 1V ,va,so u a"a, W '"o S"'ps
W 80" 49,, ".u. .,.
.,,. ,noa" ,,a ..'y oo Poss'o'e
WI. WI 90 49, m .I au'ah
o 49, ,oo 40 "h ns1 81. 70 an
CO.. ,na, O,,a,ss , "nu ~ - "o' ,Se'y
no III 10, ~ n."pSo"! WIN oe
Is ~, daan;,I, ." :" ''o Wy
aa,n,ona - ,ha ph ',;n,;. . ou'
- .nason 90 ha,;a,a ~, P"'' '"o'e
The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1899-09-01
Big Bargains at III.
Buchanan's Closing
Sale.

The average man : inability to han
die tools is responsible for much of the
profanity heard to-day. Perhaps the
Introduction of manual training in the
public schools will have IA tendency TO
purify our language.
The days are gradually growing
shorter and the evenings cooler. The
approach of fall and winter is thus be-
ing quietly proclaimed before we re
alize that the summer is fast slipping
away.
Some of our bachelor friends in
search of sweet little thing" for "A
wife may find her in the 500 poud Cal
ifornsa girl, Miss Lucia Deni II Is not
necessary to see this lady in order to
testify TO h9r MASKING powers.
The ladies of the Methodist church
gave an enjoyable ice-cream Tuesday
evening AT Mrs Alice Amberg's. In
strumental and vocal music by Mrs.
Belle Cox and Misses Mercer and Fuqua
contributed to the pleasures of the
eve ming.
~ positively will repair your
watch or clock at less than the cheap
tHts HtiNt tIt ibbiH anu
can execute tine work. Yours truly,
X. w. BUCK
"A young man attired as soldier
has been making good wages i'll north
ern Indiana selling lizard cactus direct
from Porto Rico" One woman at Val
paraiso has already raised crop of
mustard from it,
Out i'll the far West there is said to
be a perfectly honest slot machine. Its
legend reads: Put quarter III the
slot. and get IA surprise. The surprise
consists of II mechanism which points u
loaded revolver, with the notice, Drop
III all your money and your watch or
III explode in thirty seconds"
"A certain Hickman father, "A few
evenings ago, wished TO replenish the
kitchen fire, and requested his sixyear
old son to bring in few sticks of wood.
The youth replied Father, the gram
NAUTICAL portion of your education has
been sadly neglected; you should have
said Joseph, my son. please transport
from the pile of combustible, To the
threshold of this edifice, a few of the
curtailed excrecences or defunct log. ="
Who says Hickman isn't keeping
abreast Of the times
The Hickman courier. [volume] (Hickman, Ky.) 1859-current, 1899-09-01

kels- Fresh Oysters ana Celery rcceiv-
ed daily at the City Bakery.
Tho CITY Council will meet in reg
ular session next Monday night
Mr.. G. |. Hagan is building new
residence ON his farm on Troy road
Possession is nine points of the law,
and the attorneys fee is the tenth,
Mr.. Green Walkers new residence
in West Hickman is about completed.
The world has more charity for dead
men than it has for men who are dead
broke.
MIR. Goebel says he will speak IN
each county in the first Congressional
District.
There are thirteen inmates Of the
county Jail awaiting the action of the
circuit court next week.
The Woman's Equal Rights AsSo.
citation will meet at Mrs. Robert Faris'
this evening at o'clock.
Clinton is infested with burglars.
and the suggestion Is made to try Full.
tons remedy, which Is, we suppose, to
hang few.
The farmers of Hickman County
are preparing land for the largest acre.
age of wheat ever known in the history
of the county.
Merriam Garter died suddenly in
Union City, and his wife has been ar
rested charged with poisoning him.
Bail was refused.
Sept. 4th is Labor Day. by procla.
nation of Gov. Bradley. God proclaim
ed 3l2 labor days in each year-6 days
shalt thou labor, &c.
The Terpsichorean club of Hick-
man enjoyed "A dance in the new La
clede building Monday night to the
Measure of all who attended.
" Over 20 years experience IN re-
pairing fine watches aud clocks Salts
faction guaranteed or money refunded
Il. w. BUCK.
A large railroad force is now en-
gagged in putting in a "I' in West
Hickman. When that Is COMPLETED
work will commence ON the elevator.
Gov. Bradley has been advised that
no Kentuckians took part in the lynch
ing of SQUAD Bolin at Fulton. Tn,
lynching took place over the tennessee
line.
q loaves Bread for 25c.
20 loaves Bread for 81 90.
Patronize home industry and save from
20 to 30c on the dollar, AT the New CItl
Bakery.
Passenger travel on the river Is yer,
heavy at the present time. All the boat
plying between st. Louis and Memphi,
are crowded with excursionistS every
trip.
Deeds, giving the consideration a
'Sl. love and affection" must be stamp
at the value of the lands so transferred
\ special deputy from Washington j
looking after such deeds.
The Fulton Leader says it was ru
mored on the streets of Fulton, Sunday
that IA storm had done serious damag
to Hickman the night before. The re
port was without foundation.