Barre evening telegram. (Barre, Vt.) 1898-19??, 1899-02-15
HUMOR OF LUNATICS.
ASANE MANS EXPERIENCE IN AN IN
SANE ASYLUM.

have powerful sense OF humOr, sac
Washingtonian who recently returned
from trip to the coast. II confess that
I've always found morbid sort Of in
terest in going through noted insane
asylums. and 80 l armed myself witt
the proper credentials in San Francisco
and went up to Napa county to have a
look over the splendid asylum for the
insane there. Inasmuch as I wanted tc
see few things without tho attention
of a guide. didn't present my letters.
but just rambled around the beautiful.
spacious grounds for awhile. hadn't
spent three minutes examining the ex-
traordinary rose gardens in front Of the
main asylum buildi1g before a tall.
slender young man, well dressed and
exceedingly well groomed, emerged
from clump Of oleander trees and ap.
preached ME.
Taking a look around. chr" said
he to me.
Yes l said. 4 only arrived here
a few minutes ago, and I'm taking the
liberty of nosing about without any
official guidance
Well. the tall young man said.
pleasantly, Il don't suppose / fall out
of the classification "official guidance. y
seeing that l am the assistant superin
tendent here, yet should be pleased to
show You about and at the same time
try not to place any restraint upon you
by my awe inspiring presence.
well the young chaps manner was
so pleasant and winning that could
only thank him for his kindness. and
we started over the grounds. We
hadn't gone far before middle aged
man. also we'll dressed and well groom.
ed. appeared some distance in front Of
us down the gravel walk, and he beck
oned to my companion. The young
man excused himself courteously and
went up to the middle aged man. The
two conversed earnestly together for n
few minutes, and then. linking arms.
what do they do but coolly walk of.
leaving me standing there in the mid
die of the gravel path. good deal non
plused.
Z" Surprised over the way they de-
serted your said voice right back Of
ME. You mustn't mind little thing
like that, though. Both of those men
are as crazy as looms.
II turned around. and there, stand
ing behind a hedge about ten feet to my
rear, was little old gentleman. neatly
dressed in black, and with quizzical
smile on his features.
Surely, said, you cannot mean
that that rational speaking, pleasant
hammered young man who was conduct
ing me about the grounds is bereft of
his wits?'
"'Mad as a March hare, repeated
the old gentleman fatty Incurable
case. Harmless, but incurable. The
man that he went off with is also a
very sad case---very. Thinks he is the
Maharajah of Bludblud, or something
like that. But you mustn't mind 'en.
Lots of visitors are taken in the same
way. If you care to, I'll just show you
around. am one of the board of visit
ors of this institution and just happen.
to be here in my unofficial capacity to.
day.
"Much marveling over what the old
gentleman told me, fell in with him.
and we rambled around the huge gera-
mum arbors, and finally entered the
enormous glass building where the cul-
tivation of violets is carried on.
"'Nice array Of flowers. isn't it9
the old gentleman Inquired Of me, wav-
ing his hand at the beautiful beds of
violets in bloom. y ain not Unfortunately
vain, my friend, l hope you will under
stand, and yet cannot but congratu.
late myself upon tho introduction of
this violet raising feature here, for !
myself was responsible for it and only
succeeded in having this dollhouse con.
structed after enormous exertions with
the authorities of the institution
~ congratulated the old gentleman
upon the result of his labors and was
just about to ask him to take NE into
the main building and introduce me to |
the superintendent when he suddenly
excused himself. saying that he had
left his speclacles on a bench in the
gardens and would be back directly. !
waited for him for fully ten minutes,
but as he did not return | started on
out of the glass building
"'You didn't really expect him
back!' ! heard voice say. and then
I pleasant faced man, dressed as a la.
oorer and carrying a watering pot.
came from behind a group of palms.
He spoke with Scotch brogue.
"'The old gentleman you We're with
is very bad mp here, said the man with
;he watering pot, touching his fore
1ead. He's been here for 20 years, and
1e fancies he owns the place. am the
head gardener here, and he tries his
best to run me- But he don tho, sir,
lie don't. He can't No crazy man can
un me. And the Scotchman went down
he length of the raised violet beds. wa.
ering the plants.
III passed out of the glass building
md started for the entrance to the main
'ul!dlng' there to present my letters.
IS ! was about to walk up the steps to
he entrance man with side whiskers
nd rather sharp. piercing eye walked
Up to me.
lyon have business here? he in
uired Of me in rather sharp tone
Veil thought he might DO another
t EN-. and SO kept right on. He fol.
owed mo up the stairs and into the
flee. and had to hand my letters to
i'm. He was the superintendent. He
miled when | told him of my expert.
nee IN the grounds.
(which of them was really insanry
asked him :