Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1899-08-10
TIE ouIck-EIRlNa cRAzR.
Fast Reaching tho Point of Absolute
 Absurdity.

Absurdity.
 The Austrian press, including even the military journal Reiehswehr has en giving prominence to the alleged invention Of q remarkable quick-fring rife, says the London Globe This truly wonderful weapon win in the hands of a trained soldier emit no fewer tB@ 2.7eo bullets an hour, or forty five in one minute. Thus in an engagement which lasted several hours each soldier could loose off carload of ammunition, if he had il at his e. bow and an army of 50,000 men-a mere handful Of men as continental armies -w0uld require 5o,000 cart loads with the firing line in one seri- ous engagement For a campaign of invasion each soldier would require te be followed by a magazine; and shell exploding in q company would produce as many devastating explosions as there were men. If, on the other hand, each soldier marched with, say, his own 20e rounds, he could fire them all in less than five minutes and be left without ammunition for the rest Of the engage meu6 Such considerations are. of conrae. =extremei but they show that Che @reductio ad absurdum" of quick firing rifles is easily reached. Even BON the difficulty is to get enough am munition to the firing line and to keep control of the fire If rapidity of fire is much increased without some entire iy new method of bringing up ammg- hilton the occasional advantage of he- ing able to pour in a deadly hail of bull lets for a minute or two will be dearly purchased at the cost of whole bri5 gades perhaps being rendered .hors da combat for want of ammunition at the beginning of fight What applies to rife fire applies also to artillery. and the armies which have been in q hurry to arm themselves with so-callet qUiekfring artillery before the ma chinery was perfect OF the ammunition problem solved may find themselves in a worse quandary than if they had re- tained their old weapons.
 Catching Rogue.
 In great city like London thers are many importers, who make busi- ness of appealing to public sympathy by shamming sickness. Not only do they pretend to be crippled or blind. but they also feign epilepsy and other diseases, and are taken to public hos pitals in state of assumed uncon- i sciousness. One of these imposters was carried into hospital from po- lice van and laid on a sofa in the ex- amining room. The resident surgeon l had a keen eye, and watched the pa tent closely. As the apparently un= conscious man was deposited on the sofa few pennies fell out of his pockets and rolled on the floor The patient opened his eyes and made a 1 quick movement to recover the coins. l Then he bethought himself and drew ] back
 The doctor, accustomed to deal with such pretenders, turned to an attend ant and remarked:
 .You notice, probably, how limp ths man is, and how heavily he is breath ing. It is a bad case. and needs inn mediate and severe treatment. Fetch the battery
 There was a suspicious trembling oe the patients hands, and the loud breathing ceased. When the battery was produced, the doctor added, brisk ly;
 f.I1e scarcely breathes. You musc be quick Let him have the full power of the battery Half a charge will not answer the purpose
 The patient by this time had opened his eyes from sheer terror and before the wires were well in hand he had found his voice. Sitting bolt upright on the sofa, he shrieked:
 eLet me go, l beg of you. There is nothing the matter with me. l ana only poor sert of bumbug, that tries to ma few pennies by shamming Turn off your batteries and let me go
 The patient was dismissed after h7 had picked up the coins which had fallen under the sofa,
 Rough on the General.
 A French actor named Hyacintha once illustrated the saving, "Discre- .ion is the better part of valor," relates Tit-Bits. IL was in the month Of June and company of the National Guard. of which Hyacnthe was a sergeant. Bas engaging body of insurgents behind a barrieade at the other end Of ihort street One of the insurgents iE particular, from corner Of the barri- ,ade. was making remarkably effective practice on the assailants. At that mo nent up cane q general. We must