Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1899-02-17
TOO FRESH.
experience Personating a Rail
road Manager.

"There is slang expression abor
being too fresh, (" said the drumme
as he lighted his cigar, 81 have ador
ted that expression and written il ;
the head of every page of my not
book so that it will be CONSTANT
before me.
Last fall changed cars at a littl
junction in the western part of til,
State. Il is a dreary spot, and tb,
trains never connect within tbre,
nours OF each other. Finding tim,
hanging heavy on my hands, 1 wan
dered over to an orchard nearb,
where there was some tempting look.
ing fruit. 1 was so busy throwing
stones at a luscious-looking apple in
the top of one of the trees that 7 had
not noticed an old farmer bearinp
down where L was with blood in his
eye. When I discovered him il was
too late to flee, so L concluded 70
face it out.
'"Fine orchard you've got hero
sad l. opening on him before he had
chance to get in the first word. Tt
VIII be pity to spoil it by running
railroad through it.
"'Hay?' said he.
L remarked said |, that it will
be a pity to spoil such fine orchard
oy running railroad through il
L am the general manager of this
road and have been looking over it
with view of Strengthening ont
some OF the kinks. I have about
concluded to run the road throuob
your orchard and thus get rid of the
bad curve just beyond
"This disarmed the old man ot
once and placed. him in a more con.
ciliatory mood.
General manager, be ye?r said he
'Wul, come up ter the house an vel
talk it over.
Il thought the old man had some
thing In the line of wet goods that
he wanted me TO sample in the hope
that 1T might put me in good humor
and save his orchard. 1 looked at
my watch and seeing that had
plenty of time concluded TO carry
On the joke, so 1 followed him up TO
the house.
AS We were passing a brick smoke
house the old man threw the door
open and invited me to inspect n
lne lot of hams that he had inside
stepped in the doorway and as /
lid so the old man gave me a shove
That sent me inside upon my hands
and knees. Before l could recover
myself he had thrown the door shut
md locked it.
" General manager, be ye?' he
'awled through a crack in the door
81 didn't think it wise to denv il
so L shouted back that / was. and
moreover that L would take paius to
see that the railroad ran STRAIGHT
trough his house.
'Wul, we'll talk about that later
said he. Member that thar bill that
sent ye fer KILN them sheep?'
81 truthfully replied that didn't.
'Wul, said he, you'll stay where
re ar till ye do. I've got We ies'
where L want We, an if ye don't pay
ne that thar fifteen dollars that We
owe me fer kilIin' them sheep the
The railroad is goin' ter be short one
general manager
81 tried to explain the true situa-
ton, but he refused to listen. 1t was
fifteen dollars or stay where I was.
While was arguing with the old
man l heard my train q mile or so
off. L had an important engagement
70 meet and / simply had to catch
hat train, so I poked fifteen dollars
through the crack.
''The old man unlocked the door
md l was stepping out, when he
suddenly through his weight against
it.
Poke out 80 cents morer he
shouted.
What for?' I howled, as | heard
ny train getting nearer and nearer.
For postage stamps that 1
wasted writin' ye about that thar
BILL
81 didn't have time to argue the
question, so poked out SO cents
more and legged it for my train"
Journalism in Georgia.
L