The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1899-03-09
QUIT USING MECHANICS.

QUIT USING MECHANICS.
When You Are on a Sleeper Call the
Porter ''POrter."
To The st. Paul Globe:
Through the columns of your valuable
paper I'd like to make few remarks in
regards to the posted and should-be posted
travelling public First the real up-to-date
lady or gentleman who has been used to
travelling gets on ma train or boat, and then
the boat or train, either him her, &C
cording to the badge he or she wears. The
up-to,date lady and gentleman receive
these officers to bestow upon them without
any misunderstanding ON the part of either
party concerned. On the other hand. the
should-be posted traveller manages to get on
the train just as it is pulling out from the
station.
After getting two, hours ahead of leaving
times before the train leaves, and then
jumps on the way the train men do and
proceeds te kiss his hand to some lady who
ding some friend adieu on the same train.
Now are under way. The should've
posted traveller proceeds to the smoking car,
tween the smoker and the sleeper. comes
in contact with the brakeman and probably
baegageman and conductor. All these officers
are addressed by this passenger according
to their several badges.
Now he arrives in the sleeper. and secures
passage therein, seats himself and proceeds
to reading the newspaper, and then begins
to inform the passenger next to him the
contents contained therein. However, the
party whom he addresses has been reading
the newspaper for certain length of time
The conductor comes into the sleeper.
Tickets, please"
What ticket do you want?"
Your railroad ticket
What time do we get to - Mr.. Con-
ductor? Are we liable to be wrecked before
we arrive there? Are you the sleeping car
cOnductor?' -..rss4
mo, l am not. Train ticket please
Wbereupon the sfiould-be posted traveller
proceeds to give his ticket to the conductor.
Now comes the porter. A few of the
names addressed to the porter by the should
be posted traveller will be found as follows.
However, I must say before start to tell
you the names he is addressed by, must
say to you he wears a badge and uniform,
which the company that has employed him
has conferred upon him, and he is compelled
to wear it.. However, his office is designat-
ed by the badge. AS these men are colored
men, would like to know are we so in
feror we cannot be addressed by the name
hich our office designates?
Mr.. Editor, l would like to know this of
the travelling public: Every man who is in
the employ of the railroad system, from the
engineer to the sleeping conductor is ad-
dressed accordingly Consequently, how is
it that we, porters, wearing a uniform
cannot DE addressed ''porters'' also. Of
course. it is not expected that stranger
boarding sleeping car is going to address
you by your name at once, but, instead of
his saying ''Eph,' 'Mose'' Sam 'Guv-
enor." or something, why not address the
party concerned as his Office and badge des-
1gnates, as Porter" No, it seems it is an
impossibilty.
If a conductor passes In and out of the
train. he is addressed as Mr.. Conductor or
Brakeman SO and so, but each time thew
wish to call upon the porter they call him
by every name that has been given to man
or dog since the creation of Adam down to
the present time but Porter The follow
ing is only small number of the names
he is called:
Abe" ''zekial.'' "Mose," Boss" "son-
n n9 Boa sh Maior "co Fom "Som
Cap and thousand others too numerous
to mention.
Now, Mr.. Editor, one question have I to
ask, are we as porters so illiterate and in
ferlor that we cannot be addressed by the
name which the railroad company has des-
ignated for us? Weigh the matter well. all
we who travel, and tell me why we cannot be
addressed as Porter as well as the conductor
as MT; Conductor. j. NJ. NJ.
st. Paul, March 6, 1899.
Perhaps the chief reason for the familiarity
with which the travelling public treats the
porter is because of its greater confidence in
him. conductor, as 81 NJ NJ must have
observed, establishes business relations so
promptly with the public. and is, withal so
exGctlng in his fiduciary transactions that
he conveys the impression, in smoking COM
partment parlance. that he is the entire
cheese.
If a passenger who is TALL thin, full-beard-
ed and has two clear blue ewes is riding
upon borrowed mileage calling for short
pudsy person, with galways only and soli-
tary optic, symptoms of distrust are likely
to be awakened that sometimes have serious
consequences. This, we suppose, may be
somewhat accountable for the feeling CT
bauteur that has grown up between the pub
lie and the conductors of the Northwest
which finds its true expression in the more
dignihed Mister Conductor. 1t is really
fetching term when It's use Is accompanied
with an air of reservedness, not to say OF
extreme misunderstanding, of course, the
passengers mileage properly attended 10
before his journey began.
y. M. NJ, who Is undoubtedly an cb-
serving man. must have noted that conduc-
tors are not half-bad. are even human at
times and susceptible of fattery. In the dis
charge of such professional duty as the
firing of passenger whether for a real
or an imagined offense, custom has estab-
lished two lines of action-one leading
through the nearest plate glass window. the
other via the platform. The one Is sud-
den, somewhat unceremonious and never
dignifed mode of exit. To be led down a.
car aisle to the platform and thence be boot
tinctive merits as compared with the other
mode of procedure, albeit it, too. hath It's
humiiations The huge tones of the inter-
state commerce commission contain no record
of traveller DISSEMINATING by the first meth
cd who remembered the phrase Mister Con-
ductor," coincidently with the moment fixed
by that official for his departure from the
railroad train OF course, -. NJ NJ" will
readily concede, although the point may be a
trife irrelevant to the subject under dis
cIssion. that Mister Conductor" is really
one of the few genuine projections Of those
who patronize the many Interstate con-
nections established by railroad magnates OF
the nineteenth century, chiefly for their own
convenience.
We have entered upon no defense of the
conductor. Indeed, he has ever been quite
able to defend himself, But with the porter
things are so different. He has odr confid--
ence at the very outset of our journey. We
entrust him with our shoes. our watch and
chain, our wraps. our travelling bag. In the
long. dreary ride. when he gives US his Ip- /