The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1899-04-08
WORK AND
WEDLOCg.
May Talents Thrive In a
Domestic Atmos-
phere.
H IDEAL WIFE
Reflected Fame Not Always
Satisfying Foolish
Mrs. Benedict.

uncommon view OF Jho ARTIST u mar
riage.
This writer says: stThe imperious need
of man is not to love, but to work. II he
love happily, his work goes IN apace; If
he do not love, it still goes on.
eff he marries and loves his wife, he Is
glad of her presence in the intervals Of
rest between labor or novel or portrait.
And Of woman and love this writer
points out: "a primal need of woman's
nature is not to work, but to love. She
must decide whether to pursue her chosen
art or to marry will make her happier"
To sum it all up, the author Of these
remarks has but subscribed to the old sem
timent, Love is of mans life a thing
apart; it's womaWs whole existence"
/ may be neither so learned nor wise as
the cid writer or the newer one quoted,
but the world is spread cut before US all,
and why may we not all tell Of the lessons
or facts that we have learned2
Love is not of mans life a thing
apart, neither is it "woman's whole ex-
istenee"-that is, it is just so much a part
of her existence as 1t is a mans; no more
nor no less on either side.
1t has been insisted upon times without
number that a talented man or a talented
woman should emain unwed; that one
who is taken up with the pursuit of fame
is not calculated to make another happy.
Well, we cannot nave everything in this
world. If u husbands are inventors or
scientists or writer's or painters, we cannot
expect them to be amiable escorts to thea
tiers or dinner parties every evening. We
must find our recompense In. being "the
wife of the famous Mr.. Smith"
And now for the other side of the ques-
ton, for there is another side, and this
side is the one that proyokes much gossip
and much speculation every time ii Is
dragged forth into the glare Ct public
opinion. Shall g woman pursue her tai
ents after she is married?
Let the life stories of the women whe
have answer this question. There Is no
need for me to attempt to.
Perhaps the talented and ambitious
woman is quite content to be the famous
Mrs. Smith," while her husband is simply
"Mr. Smith, the husband Of the brilliant
Mrs. Smith" If Mr.. Smith is satisfied
to have this so, why need the rest of us
make COMMENT? But Mr.. Smith Is not
always satisfied, and shat is why we conn
ment and many times credit Mr.. Smiths
rebellion to the arrant imperioasness of
man. Poor Mr.. Smith He rather de-
serves our sympathy. He Is . little proud.
you know; has a good position, which he
has made for himself in the world, and.
love, youknow, is dependent upon q good
mary things for life, and not the least Of
these on the part OF the proud man Is q
certain little tactful flattery on the part
of the woman he has asked to share his
lot. If you call tli1s selfshness and AFRO
canoe, then set it down to that, but re-
hN,. I 49, r-LsJ-
been SO, and the most of us would not
change it all If we could.
My Atlantic Monthly friend mentions
Mary Shelley and Elizabeth Barrett
Browning as the happy wives of talented
men and wisely mentions them as excep-
tions. These were truly ideal marriages,
but it was the intellectual and not the
domestic life that formed the ideal.
There have been other happy unions Of
men u women whose tastes and asptra-
tions ran along tremendously in the same
grooves, but these, too, must be noted as
exceptional. They certainly do not be-
long to the commonplace, else we would
not cite them.
Let me tell you q funny little story. Ak
least 1t is funny now because both the
people concerned in it are young and the
honeymoon Is not SO long past that they
have grown indifferent to the small triies
that worry each other every day.
Mr.. Benedict is an immensely clever
fellow. He looks well to his business af-
fairs and writes stories and poems that
meet with ready acceptance. Now little
Mrs. Benedict has discovered that;a liter
airy mans wife has woes. She has been
thinking a good deal about this discovery
of late, and one evening not long since she
read some of Mr.. Benedict's stories and
poems and cried. She did net cry because
the writings were in a particularly deleful
strain, but she cried because-weIL she
told Mr.. Benedict the ssbecaussn after dim
ner, and she reserved her tears until that
moment too.
"You are not writing them to me, /" she
sobbed. You love, or you have loved,
some other woman"
Poor Benedict did what hecould to COM
fort her. He declared that she was the
only woman he had ever loved or ever
would love and finally wound up yowin8
he would never write another line.
Now, about Mr.. Benedict's heart affairs
I do not know, but 1 do know that he will
write many more lines; that he can no
more refrain from putting on paper his
rare and charming thoughts than q bird
can cease from flying until its wings are
broken, and l am glad of it. 1t should
more than a woman's whim to kill q
mans ambition. But never fear; genius
is immortal. 1t may sometimes be- stided,
but it can never be killed.
/ do hope that dear little Mrs. Benedict
will put by her childishness and praise the
next stories and poems that the clever
Benedict writes until he concludes that he
discovered the very best critic that the
has ever produced and therefore
works to please the little critic at his
hearth as well as the big outside public.
If Mrs Benedict does not do this, then
she will find her talented husband drifting
away from her and becoming more and
more devoted to his work. And then it
Just may happen that she will call herself
) NEGLECTED wife" and take no share or
in the fame that comes to Mr..
Benedict.
A woman may pursue her talents after
narriage-yes, if she can set aside all
domestic claims without bringing discord
INTO her W or the lives of others.-Mar-
yaret Hannis IN St. Louis Republic
Retter Left Unsaid.