Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1899-09-27

Morgan's Bur- Saw.

Norgan's Buzx Saw.
My dear misguided human brother: Just |
lay down your fusees. bows and arrows and |
let me talk TO you a little. I want to give you |
little advice and some information.
Now, to begin with, you fellows would do |
just as well to climb into Q sausage grinder as |
to tackle Uncle Samuel Uncle Samuel il a |
fgurative expression for seventy millions of
people. do not want to SEQ mince meat !
made of you. We have too many varieties OF
beef now. You may think you are receiving |
pretty hard treatment but, Great ecotti what
would 1t be If Uncle Sam should take notion
to send you cargo of canned army beef?
You ought to be thankful you have escaped
that.
Now let me tell you what to do: Stop Tight
ing. 1t is only a matter of time when you'll
get licked anyway. Surrender on one condi-
ton only-that you shall not be fed on canned
beef.
You fellows do not know what good thing
you are missing by not wanting 20 become
citizens OF this grand country of ours. There
isn't anything like IL under the sun. You
ought to send delegation over here to see us
this land OF the free-land Of churches and
400 900 licensed saloons; bibles. forts and guns:
houses OF prayer and licensed houses OF pros
titution; 'millionaires and paupers; theolo-
gians and thieves; libertines ana liars; Christ
| tians and chain gangs; politicians and poYer-
w.. and "a md frar
money and n Use ry; homes and hunger; yir-
tue and vie
A land you can get good bible for
Is cents and a bad drink of whiskey for
| three wives, and lot in the penitentiaries for
having two wives; where some men make
| sausage out OF their wives and some want to
| eat them raw; where we make bologna saus-
age out of dogs. canned beef out of horses and
sick cows, and corpses out of the people who
eat 1t; where we put man in jail for not
having the means OF support and on the rock
pile for asking fora job of work; whore we IL
cense bawdy houses and fine men for telling
| the truth on the street; where we have con-
| gress of 400 men to make laws and supreme
court of nine men to set them aside; where
good whiskey makes bad men and bad men
make good whlske,; where newspapers are
paid for suppressing the truth and made rich
for teaching lie; where professors draw
their convictions from the same source they
do their salaries; where preachers are paid
$25, 900 year to dodge the devil and tickle the
| ears Of the wealthy; where business consists
in getting property in any way that won't
"hold you up" and poverty holds you down;
where men vote for what they do not want
for fear they will not get what they do want
by voting for it; where "niggers' can vote
and wome where the girl who goes
wrong liz made an outcast and her male part
ner fourishes as a gentleman; where women
we ar false hair and men 'dock" their horses
tails; where the political wire-puler has dis
placed the patriotic statesman; where men
vote for a thing one day and ''cuss" it 1884
days; where we have prayers on the floor of
lar; where we spend $1,000 to bury a con-
gresham who is rich, and $40 to put away a
workingman who is poor where to be virtuous
is to be lonesome. and to be honest il to be cal
of energy and pull wide open the throttle of
conscience; where gold is . substance-the
one thing sought for and God is a waste bask-
ct for our better thoughts and good resolu-
tons; where we pay $4,000 for dog and Is
cents dozen to a poor woman for making
shirts; where we teach the "untutored In.
dian" eternal life from the bible, and kill him
with bad whiskey; where we put man in jail
for stealing loaf of bread, and in congress-
for stealing railroad; where the check-book
talks, sin walks in broad daylight Justice II
asleep, crime runs amuck, corruption perme'
ates our whole social and political fabric. and
the devil laughs from every street corner.
, Come 20 us, FIllies; we've got the grandes'
aggregation of good things. and bad things,b bis
things and little things, hot things and cold
things. soft and hard things, all sizes. varie
ties and colors ever exhibited under one tent
We've got more guns, more bibles and more
whisky than any two shows on earth. If yor
, don't come Wen fetch you. "Read ye not the
changeess truth, the free can conquer but t.
, save?' or words to that effect? We want t.
: save you first, then wen "salr you down.
! Then we will give you bible and you can ge
, consolation out of it without extra charge
"If the salt lose its SAVIOR wherewith shall it b
Z saltedT' whom the Lord loveth He chasten
!. eth" ''Thro' much suffering you are mad
perfect" That's what our guns are for.
OF course when you fellows Zine us yol
:. win have to stop eating each other. You vii
be our meat then. Our people won't stand /
to see a lot of good meat wasted that way. Vol
can eat each others substance that makes tn
flesh--we do that. but not the flesh. You cal
eat dog bologna or canned horse meat. 1t wi
y be almost as healthy and will expand on
| rnaot troaa