The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1899-01-26
PASSING EVENTS.
months,
BY HANS MILLER.

BY HANS MILLER.
Several moons ago we had an idea
that if patience and perseverance
were prime essentials in the making of
a writer, your humble servant, Hans
Miller, thought he was created especial
ly for that purpose. Laboring under
this delusion we have succeeded in
wasting loads of paper, including a
faber or two, but find that writing is
as uncongenial to us as it is for mud
turtle to leave log hastily. That old
idea has moved out and methinks it
will require a thirteen inch gun to
force like idea into our belfry.
Capt. William Taylor has just
brought claim against Uncle Sam for
$72,5OO for vessels which were used by
Commodore Farragut during the civil
war. We are happy to say that he is
no relation of the genial usher connect
ed with this institution. We asked
him about it and he said he thought it
it was only few schooners stolen by
middies while on shore leave.
The MIRROR is decidedly on the
boom lately. There isn't day but what
we receive several new subscribers and
numerous requests for sample copies.
Old subscribers are as prompt in their
renewals as is cashier in cashing a
check. New exchanges are coming in
from all parts of the United States,
and it is being quoted by the very best
of them. There is nothing too good for
the Dutch, and the better the paper the
harder the editor hits the ceiling. This
is his way OF expressing his apprecia-
ton when he sees first class, spicy
and up.to date paper. This expansion
wave has carried many dollar on its
crest and safely beached it high and
dry in our woodbox. Iii continues to
wave for another six months, the editor
says that he may enlarge the paper and
thus add few features in it's makeup,
including social column written by
the female inmates.
An inventive genius has invented a
trackless locomotive. This is an aw-
full sad blow to train robbers and law
yers.
A young woman in St. Louis demon
strated the fact that she was immune
from snake poisoning by letting rat
tier sink it's fangs in her arm. Her
appearance at this stage of the poison
ing epidemic, is very timely. She can
be utilized as faster of bon bons and
bromo- seller.
An eastern paper has just discovered
that the President keeps horse in the
west end of the White House. Our
Washington correspondent says it was
placed there at the beginning of hostil-
tiles when the whole seacoast was
threatened, so as to enable the Presi-
dent to make hasty exit and avoid
being captured by the Dons.
"A syndicate has purchased the oil
wells in California. The price amount,
ed to seven figures and the transfer was
conducted in a smooth and satisfactory
manner.
In st. Louis policeman was arrest
ed for stealing guns. We think he was
trying to sneak into "Old Tig's" shoes
and become a "big gun" all in a mo.
ment.
When you are positive that you are
right, don't throw the throttle wide
open and rush madly ahead with full
steam on.
"The Bryan ImperfectO" is the name
of new brand of cigars that has been
put upon the market for the express
purpose of filling the Democratic bar.
rel. This means death for all faithful
Democrats. The Republicans could
win even if the much despised Sec. AL.
ger was placed at the head of the
ticket.
o o o
Two headed snakes are very plenti-
full in West Virginia. The whisky
down there must be something like the
imported" quality they have in the