Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1899-07-18
u 57s577s
WHAT IS A KISSING BUG?


Circus day two fellows were quarrel
Ing in front Of the Hotel Windsor over
the question, what is kissing bug?
Each had al small bottle and each bot
tie contained a bug. Each disputant
vigorously maintained that his bug was
the genuine kisser and that the other
was a fake.
The first one said that the other did
not know a kissing bug from beer
wagon, and the other retorted that his
opponent could not tell an osculatory
beetle from a Wheelbarrow.
Fortunately the professor happened
along just as they were preparing to
settle the argument by force of arms
and they decided to leave the matter
4 with him.
The professor adjusted his spectacles
and examined the bottled specimens.
Just as / expected" he said. This
animal you have here" referring to the
first specimen, lis not a beetle. He be-
longs to the sub-kingdom, annulosta, -
the class insecta, and is member OF a
sub-order of the Orthoptera, called the
Blatta, in other words, 1t is nothing
but cock roach.
The man who championed the cock
roacher's claim as kisser seemed
much disappointed.
"This other fellow" said the profess
sor, referring to the second specimen,
lis in measure related to the cock
roach; he is also member OF the sub
kingdom, annulsoa, and is likewise an
insect, but of the order Coleofstera-
commonly known as the beetle. This
particular specimen is the melontha
yulgaris, and bears the common name
of cockchafer or May bug, but it is
called by many in this locality the June
bug. 1t is an awkward, stupid brown
fellow that, following the light, often
plumbers into houses and flies in an
aimless way, butting against the walls
and furniture AS bug it is absolute
ly harmless. In its larval state it
does much damage to crops. 1t some
times exists in such numbers in Europe
as to cause great inconvenience in
travel, sometimes stopping transit of
stage coaches. Like the bedbug, the
cock roach the mosquito and the fly
it follows the flag" All these pests
keep pace with civilization"
But professor if neither of these
bugs is a kissing bug what then is a
kissing bug?"
well" said he refectively, both are
about as much kissing bug as can be
found. That bug, my friends, is not
found in any work in entomology on
earth, and has never been met by nat
uralist, Zoologist, or scientist. He ex-
lists both in the imagination and in
current newspaper reports and is but
a SDecieS of the hum bug"
mo one ever saw this supposed bug
bite anyone-and all such cases are
merely suggestions. And then the
wonderful description of this bug! =
here the professor took packet of
newspaper clippings from his pocket.
Il have here a number of descriptions
of him, and he is veritaIbIe protean,
for with each appearance he changes
his outward character. In Philadel-
phia he is 81 black, shiny bug with red
eyes" In Pittsburg he is "a frealNish
looking blue bug with long mosquito
like bill and has protruding eyes, 1t
is doubtful if such bugs as those de-
scribed, ever existed. In Wheeling
here, he is of medium brown color"
and has eight legs In the coleop-
terra or order of beetles, it is estimated
that there are from fifty to one hum
dred thousand species, and this is the
first instance of an eight legged one
being found. 1t would require columns
to describe all these kissing bugs and
the various supposed effects of the al
legged bites,-they are as disslmilar as
the different brands of "red licker'
Everything from a stone-bruise TO car
buncles and dropsy is attributed to this
strange bug. 1t is simply an evidence
of what imagination will do"
CAS- an example, take the great joke
perpetrated by the N. Y. Sun about the
flying machine-somewha similar to
its great joke of earlier years, the bal
loon hoax, by Poe-eyerybody every
where saw flying machines in the air,
when there was not one to be seem
.'Some years ago in down the river
town, man said he saw a strange ami
NAL in the river. The story got into
the papers and every body along the
river commenced seeing all kinds OIL
strange animals. Then the report cir
culated that it was an escaped sea-lion
from a circus. Then the people
promptly commenced seeing sea-lions.
When in truth no sea-lion had escaped
and there was no strange animal to be
seem
IF bug of such propensities and
dangerous effects really existed, it
would have been located and classified
years ago. All kinds of innocent bugs
have been charged with the alleged
crimes of this mysterious humbug.
But it is contrary to the laws of evolu-
ton to suppose that a bug would
change his habits OF centuries, in a
single season. Even the harmless fire.