Akron daily Democrat. [volume] (Akron, Ohio) 1892-1902, 1899-07-28
A MUTILATED POET.
HIS LINES WERE LAME. BUT WERE
PRINTED UAMER.

Whcreat the Indignant songster
Arose In His Wrath and Vafnly
Tried to Show the Editor the Error
of His Ways.
When western editor WAS sitting in
his office one day, man whose brow
was clothed with thunder entered.
Fiercely seizing Il chair. he slammed
his hat on the table, hurled his UNI
brclla on the floor and sat down.
Are you the cditor?" he asked.
Yes"
Can you read writing?
of course
at the colonel an envelope. with an in
scription upon it.
"R"- said the colonel. trying to
spell it.
That's not B. It's an s." said the
man.
IS; oh, yes; see. Well, it looks like
Salt for dinner or Souls of sinners :"
said the colonel.
No, sir" replied the man; nothing
of the kind, That's my name-Samuel
H. Brunner. | knew you couldn't read.
l called to see you about that poem of
mine you printed the other day on the
'Surccase of Sorrow"
Il don't remember it. said the colo
mel
"Of course you don't. because it went
into the paper under the Infamous title
of 'Smearcase Tomorrow"
a blunder OF tiic composi:or's, sup
pose"
''Yes, sir: and that's what want to
see you about. The way in which that
poem was mitiiA;ed was simply scan
dalous. ] haven't slept night since.
II exposed me 20 ;lerision. People think
that am an ass. Let me show you.
Tho first line when | wrote 1t, read in
this way:
Living by a weeping willow. underneath gentle
Siope
THAT is beautiful, poetic. affecting.
Now, how did your vile sheet present
1t to the public?
Lying to a weeping widow to induce her to elope.
Weeping widow, mind you. A wild
ow: Oh, thunder and lightning! This
is too much.
But look a-here at the fourth verse.
That's worse yet:
"Cast thy pearls before the swine and lose them
in the dirt.
''lIe sets it UP in this fashion:
ii they hurt.
"Now, isu't that cold blooded out
rage Oh mans feelings? I'll leave it
To YOU if IL isn't
IFS harti. that's Il fact" said the
colonel.
And then take the fifth verse. In
the original manuscript it said, plain
as daylight:
'Taae away the jinsng money; it is only gilt
'crng dross.
'1n its printed form you made me
say:
Take away the tinging honey: Put some flies
in for the boss.
"By George. felt like Draining you
with fire shovel! | was never so cut
up in my life. There for instance. was
the siAth verse. wrote:
q am weary OF the tossing OF t:a ocean as it
hes cs.
1T is a lovely line 700. But imagine
my horror and the anguish of ing fam
lily when opened your paper and saw
the line transformed into:
'.I am wearing out nv trouser. till they're omen
at the knees.
''That is a little too much. That
seems TO me like carrying the thing an
inch or two too far. l think l have
constitutional right TO murder that
compositor; don't your"
81 think you have
lie, me read you one more verse.
wrote:
"a swell the flying echoes they roam among
the hills
And feel my soul awakening to the ecstasy that
thrills.
'Now. what do you s'pose your mis-
erable outcast turned that into? Why,
into this:
81 smell the frying sho.s they ,>.st along the
bulls.
And peel my soul mistaken in tae rrctary that
whirls.
81 must slay that man. Where is
he?"
"He is out Just now," sait the colo
mel. Come in tomorrow"
81 WILL" said the poet. and l will
come armed"