Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1899-12-01
"reminiscences Of Cushing.

all his life, and it is not On record
that he had any fondness for the fair
sex. On the contrary, there is good
reason to believe that he he'd sort
of antipathy to them, as tn. follow
ing incident will show.
Nearly opposite Mr.. Cushing's
bachelor quarters lived Hannah F.
Gould, poetess of no mean preten-
sions and celebrity of Ter time.
Her aversion to bachelors, too, it
would appear, was pronounced, and
upon some pretext or other unknown,
she took occasion to express her
antipathy for her neighbor, il wanton
and womanly fashion, as follows:
Lie still, all ye dead,
For on the next bed
Reposes the body of Gushing
Who crowded his way
Through life, so they saw,
And now, though he's dead,
May be pushing"
Evidently this was too much for
the dignified statesman, who, stunc
by the post m,ortem reference to his
vaulting ambition, retoIted with an
epitaph, for his spinster assailant, in
this pointed style:
"NOw Hanna is done,
WIN nor rhyming and hin,
AND green grows the grass that's
She has sent every beau
10 the regions below,
AND has gone down herself for a
Now the STANDARD is also able to
relate rather humorous reminis-
cence OF the distinguished statesman
which, it is believed, has never before
appeared in print. The pleasant
story proceeds somewhat On this wise ::
When, during the administration of
PRESIDENT Tyler. Mr.. Gushing was ap-
pointed Commissioner to China to
inaugurate the first treaty ever made
between that nation and the United
States, he took with him as his priv
ate secretary, Fletcher Webster, son
of Daniel Webster, a home-m ade.
Yankee of the first water. At inter-
walls during his official duties, Webster
found time to write home to his
friends many graphic accounts of
ludicrous scenes which agreeably var
led their monotonous life in the ca nj
tai OF the Flowery Kingdom. One of
the spiciest tid-bits he ever wrote
back was an account of their first
meal taken after reaching China. On
being ushered into the gorgeously
festooned dining-hall, it happened
through some oversight that their
Chinese interpreter was not present :;
although, as Webster puts it, "being
hungry as wolves" they Jared very
well, considering the adverse circum.
stances. BY the way, Fletcher avoided
everything in the meat line and filled
himself with delicious fruits and
vegetables. Not so, however, with the
greedy Cushing. He ate everything
that had the appearance of fish, flesh,
or fowl. From one particular dish
resembling sort Of highly seasoned
minced meat, he filled his plate many
times and devoured the last morsel,
"Now Mr.. Cushing" said Webster,
after they had finished their meal,
suppose you find out what YOU have
been eating" "How could lido that"
replied Cushing, "when neither the
walters nor ourselves can speak the
others language" "Why, indeed"
continued the irrepressible secretary"
just try natural language; that is, you
have only to motion one of the wait
ers and then below like bull, bleat
like sheep, squeal like a rig, quack
like duck, gobble like turkey, or
crow like a cock; don't you see?"
81 see, / see," replied Mr.. Gushing,
gleefully as we'll as hopefully, and so
he essayed to do. Touching his plate
and reckoning the stupid waiter, he
began thus, " Moo! moo! varing the
lingo as John Chinaman shook his
head, until he had gone through the
entire category OF "Ba-al ba-a!;
Week! we-e-k!; Quack! quack! /;
Gobble! gobble! and Cock a-doodle-
do" With heathenish chuckle and
a grin, the waiter shook his head at
every one of these natural signs, to the
utter wonderment of both of the
men. AS last resort, Mr.. Cushing
touched his plate and looked appeal
ingly into the eyes of the mummy
faced heather who at once removed all
doubt by pursuing his skinny lips and
vociferating, "Bow-wow-wow! New
mew-mew" go yes~ screamed Flet-
cher, "and so it was stewed puppy and
kitten, after all ha! Ina! hap
Now the STANDARD does not wish to
take the wind out of Mr.. Plummer's
sails he has trimmed SO nicely, but we
rellglously believe that Fletcher
Webster's yarn would take the prize
before competent jury of up-to-date
professional humorists.
OLD METHODS. The
old and nresumahlv uall oato ll;sLaI