The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-10-01

let me make you map Of college, society,
First we have an inner set made up oi the incest
girls some rich. some Of good family. some clever
lar girls in college but some Of them have not
the qualities that would have made them popu-
lar II they had stood on their own merits hey
are merely negative and have nothing obiec-
tionable about them. They entered under favor
able circumstance, as you are entering Some
preparatory school. bringing friends wiithp her
and finding friends awaiting her, is enough 70
carry her into the set But after all. as said,
these advantages are little more than introduce
tons II you do not have them you must show
reason for entering the set You must be par
you will be taken in; but II, at any time, after
you are are, in you run counter TO public opinion
Is swift and s efa ies9 money in nor 'G sis
nor brains win save girl who has been pro.
nOunced vulgar"
And what is the punishment" .,-..
Social nstracism You cannot imagine any
thing harder than the extreme cases Of IT, No
her in the hall you bow without speaking. i
she comes TO your room you do not ask her 70 sit
down down, She walks alone. goes e all the college
worst Of the whole thing s that The Punshmsn,
cept a general feeling that the sirl was un,idy
and unclean. Her nails were often dirty. and
her hair looked uncombed and greasy, and it
was r ,btt mat she bs thed only once week
50 did some Of the res, Of us, But we could
we would have been dropped ours ourselves That
il one thing want to warn you about Don't
yet entangled in any Of these ostraesnl cases
degrees Of them, running from the extreme cases
TO the lightest ones where the ostracism Is little
more than an exclusion from intimate gather
ings No one talks about these things, but pub,
lie opinion makes itself felt In most cases there
y some reason back Of IT. Nearly every, time
will harm yourself"
Please 20 back to your map"
from outside social conditions but weeds itself
out and enlarges itself tests Of personal merit.
Next there is the crowd Of the commonplace girls
who help make UP public opinion and who
all nice enough II you find them interesting. And
finally there are the girls who are ostracised
broken into little cliques, and as the year goes
ON the cliQues get stronger After they are once
formed they are seldom changed A girl almost
acquaintance outside Of her own clique. but not
intimate friends
But thought colleges had no cliques | have
There is something disagreeable in the sound
Of the word, so people often deny the existence OF
them. But isn't II perfectly reasonable that a
large body should break up into small bodies in
which greater intimacy IL possible? There is
nothing Objectionable in the process. The only
trouble is that the intmacies are usually the result
OF accden, and are not founded on any likeness
in taste or temperament Now you are going
But girl who comes here as a stranger is apt TO
fall in at first with the girl who sits next TO her
Laboratory. Or worse still, one of the girls who
has failed TO make friends in her own class will
call on her and ,overwhelm her with attention
Rather than walk alone. she goes 10 walk with
one OF these girls Others who see them together
will couple their names in speaking Of them until
suddenly they are committed to an intimacy;
uncongeniel. but II they are broken up the new
girl finds that the other cliques are formed and
by the company she keeps 80 that one OF these
unfortunate friendships may delay or even pre-
vent altogether the formation OF dcs rable ones
You can't exagSerate the importance OF this mat
ter ! sometimes think that more depends on
your friendships in college than on all your study
ing. wish could have a card printed and put
in every freshmans room;
Don't be in a hurry 10 make friends
mon with you
Don't lei propinguity alone cause intmacies -
There was little pause. The freshman sat
disappearing. doubling. The senior was restless
and changed the position OF the silver writing set
on her table two or three times before she began
once more.
There are two suggestions want to make for
the sake OF completeness, although they do not
apply to you at all. One is that girls who in
college ought TO be very careful about their per
sonal appearance. Shut up together as we are
we become much more critical than men, and we
sensitive ' 70 ngness We notice and a' APPRECIATE
clothes girl need not dress extensively, but
want her 10 DIRE $ tastefully. She can wear
shirt waists all winter but they must fit her and
De clean.
The second thing is that girls ought to make
an effort TO be good .natured all the time II you
can't mend thing by speaking OF II, don't speak,
have known many enemies made by the persis-
tent repetition, at the breakfast table OF the ono
sentence We always have such bad coffee here
After all, however. the main thing IL 10 put your
best foot forward in the beginning keep yourself
subordinate until you are sure Of your ground,
and avoid rash intimacies and i'll advised friend
ships. / wish | could say mat TO every freshman
here Iverl!y believe II would save half the OF
nervous breakdown, for they usually come from
social complications and not from overwork. II
We drank healths in tea | would say, Here's TO
your social success in college"