Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1899-05-09

IL,
Got on TO every crook and curve
OF open ard of secret foes,
And by their skill and by their blows
I'ut Uncle Sam where he could be
The steel-clad master of the sea;
OF what you've seen and done and heard
Saw wood.
Saw wood ye great; saw wood. We small;
Saw wood We tighteIsi one and nd, al LILA
Say many that would stir the blood;
The man who's safe in all he says
Keeps still in forty languages.
You've done your duty as you should,
And now saw wood, saw wood, saw wood,
Say, don't you know where you are at!
A tighter is no diplomat.
w. ]. l.. in New York Sum-
At breakfast recently Washington
young woman found a little note at her
plate. saying that her aunt had arrived
from the East the night before and was
at a well-knoWn hotel, says the Phlla-
delphia Call About o'clock she went
to the hotel indicated and asked the
clerk whether the newcomer had been
formed her that he did not believe she
had been down, and offered to send up
card.
..Oh. never mind doing that she re-
piled You just tell me the number
Of her room and | will go up,
NO. promptly the
and the young woman took the elevator.
Upon arriving at the door of No. -,
instead of rapping. she softly put her ear
to the door and listened, in order that
she might not disturb her aunt, ii she
We're asleep. She heard no noise, and so
took out one Of her cards, and after writ
ing will come again at 10. Jane" she
tied a little bunch Of flowers to it and
left it on the knob, where it would fall
into the doorway when the door was
opened.
At 10 o'clock she came again The
clerk had not seen her aunt, and did not
believe that she had left her room. So
after looking about the parlors in vain
she went to the door of No. and
softly tapped.
Who is it," came a gruff voice, and
at the same time a man opened the door
and stepped out into the hall.
oh, you are the party who was COM
ing again at 10 o'clock, are you?'' con-
tinued the man, smilingly. well, what
can do for you?''
Nothing, thank YOU she replied, sun
less you come downstairs and help me
thrash that hotel clerk
I'm one of the schools Of this city re-
GENTLY" says the Worcester Gazette.
the teacher, intending to relieve the
monotony of the regular exercises. asked
OF course there was an instant clamor in
the affirmative, and then the teacher
asked what song they would prefer. One
little boy, in his eagerness to- make the
selection spluttered out something which
the teacher did not catch. Turning to
the boy across the aisle, she asked what
Johnnie said. Please came the unex-
pected answer, he says he wants to sing
His Country, It's of Him.
-:o:-
From Fennimore Cooper and other au-
thorities we have gained the impression
that the Indian is stolid, severe individ-
ual, with no sense of the white mans
self quite civilized joker the other day
in the United States court He was on
the stand in a hotly-contested case and
Attorney d. 4. Bailey of Sioux Falls
was after him in the most approved
fashion of cross-eXamnation. Finally.
after apparently frightening the Indian
with the awful consequences which
would follow the slightest deviation from
the truth, Mr.. Bailey took his most por-
tentOus tone and solemn manner and de
manded:
Now, sir, I want you to tell me the
exact truth, without any shutting or eva
sion. | want you to look me square in
the eye and tell me how you get your
living, sir
The Indian looked straight at Mr.
Bailey, and, with that imperturbable ali
familiar to all acquainted with the red
men. simply said, Eat"
The courtroom roared, even Judge Car
land smiled and Mr.. Bailey let the wit
ness go.-St. Paul Pioneer Press.
An amusing incident happened in one
of the prominent uptown hotels in New
York the other afternoon. when a we'll
dressed woman, about six feet high,
rushed up to the desk and importuned
the head clerk to find her husband. who
had become lost. There was search,
and in a few minutes the diminutive
partner-for he was only three feet high
of her joys and sorrows was found
In full hearing of the hotel help and
guests she lectured her midget husband
severely for getting lost, concluding by
informing him that had she not been SO
careless as to leave the railroad tickets
to Cleveland in his keeping she would
have left him behind. The husband
looked as if he were sorry that she had
not executed the threat.
you amt toll me nuthin' bout John
what's he adoin' of now?"
We'll, when be ain't farmin' he's
teachin' school, and when he amt teach
in he's preachin' medicine, an when he
amt in the medicine business he's
preacnln an SaVln souls. ana when be
amt a dom of that he's a-runnin' fer
office, an when he amt in politics he's
lawn III the iestice courts, an when
that gives out he most inginrully is a.
sellin' of books or maxim of moonshine
Hckerr'-Atlanta Constitution.
That letter of reprimand to Capt
Coghlan has not been made public, but
the Pittsburg Dispatch may not be far
~, -
runs something like this:
''Ofice Secretary of the Navy,
Washington, D. c., April 20, 1899.
ITO Capt. J. B. Coghlan, United States
Steamship Raleigh:
'Sir-As a story-teller and dialect
singer you sem TO be a popular success,
but DON'T DO IT AGAIN, you ras-
cally seadog. Very respectfully, your
obedient servant, John d. Long,
IL