The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1899-05-20
Senator yandiyer.


Prom the Fulton Sun
JEFFERSON Cir. No., April 2i.-
Gray = haired, gentle = yisaged, warm
hearted Charles II. yandiyer, Of La
iayette county, senator from the Seven
tenth district, Is one Of the characters
OF the Missouri state senate. When
the hours grow tedious In the senate.
and monotony and WEAKNESS peryade
the south end Of the state capitol, II
becomes the duty Of the gentleman
from Lafayette to relieve the dullness
there investing aud deligh, the risibil-
tiles Of Missouri senators. Senator
VandiVer doubts that be is witty aud
rather ~deprecates the fact that be is
the accredited humorist Of the senate,
but the story Is out that he is mirth-
provoking and that he tells a good
story, and whether desirable, or other
wise, he must be = wit so long as he
remains 4 member OF the senate. The
senator can blame himself for the
reputation he has for humor. II he
had never told his rabbit story be
possibly could have served numerous
years 10 the general assembly and told
stories hourly and still never have
been called 3 hnmorist. This rabbit
story is about two darkIes who had
rabbit dogs. Negro vanity in the
ownership Of dogs caused one darkey
to boast of the excellencies his dog
possessed, and the other darkey dis
credited the merits of the dog and
claimed bis dog as the superior rabbit
dog Of the community. 1t was decided
to test the comparative merits Of the
two dogs in q hunt. In IN Inlmltable
style the Senator tells the story Of the
dispute, and gives an account Of The
bunt and the boisterous Boosting Of
the negro whose dog was successful in
the chase. He uses the genuine negro
dialect, and brings down the house
every time. Once each year be must
tell this story at 4 reception at the
executive mansion.
Senator yandiver presided on the
occasion Of the reelection Of Senator
Cockrell to the United States senate In
January, and after the formalItie'
attending the election Of a United
States senator had been finished, ht
was called on TO sing a song and tel
the rabbit story. The song wal
original with vandiver, and tells how
TO get to the political land Of Canaan.
and RUM in this wise:
Then fall In the line and follow Mr.. Bryan,
PoF the bimetalic hos am a-gainin';
And honest Dick Bland "a a-comln' wild de ban'
GOiu' 10 the happy land Of Canaan"
There are five verses Of the sOnl
besides the chorus and refrain. Teller
Stone and Marx Hanna ars al
mentioned in the song.
In the last session Of the legislaturl
Nj. VandiVer introduced q bill to fin
widows and old maids not less thai
500 nor more than $500 for refusing
TO marry bachelors and disconsolat
widowers. The senator is q bachelo
but no one has EVER limited that thi
bill was designed 10 assist him 10
matrimonial alliance. After a heaie'
discussion IN committee Of the whole
Was referred TO Gen. Billy Rider.
Another trolicsome bill introduce
by Mr.. yandiVer was one 10 proteC
"aged, inGrm and debilitated sheep
and to pay them one thousand dollar
per annum. At the same time b
introduced q bill TO make II "unlawft
for any person or persons TO kill, main
or wound any bug, g~rasshoppel
screech owl, red ant, black ant, G
other insects that eat chintz bugs.
But YandlVer is not always funny
When business is on hand be is read
10 deal with il in q serious way. II
has the interests Of the people at beal
and Is rigid In cbampionlpg the
cause. tie does as much TO promOl
good legislation as any man in Ii
|, senate. lie fights vigorously again
trusts and combines and corporal
r Entertainments. la the mental men
orandum every lobbyist keeps IL a
entry concerning the infexibility (
Senator VandiVer. lie is stern IN b
degotlon to duty aud untirng in h
efforts to assist righteous causes.
Mr.. yandiyer is an excellent exampI
Of the courteous old Virginia gentl,
wan, for he Is afable and agreeable