Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1899-09-22
ARE GREAT BUFFERS.
Central Americans Can Appreciate
No Argument but Force.

From the New Orleans Times-Democrat.
The key to the situation is this said
veteran shipper, discussing the crisis in af-
fairs at Bluefeds: "A Central American
invariably takes it for granted you are
bluffing. That's why it is 50 easy to skin
them alive a poker. When a native official
says thing, he always means another.
and, therefore, when he wants to tell the
truth he is obliged to tell lie. The thing
sounds paradoxical, but its a cold fact.
Ethics are topsy-turvy down there, and the
only way an American arrive at the
native point of view is by standing on his
head Now, Torres. for instance, has sup
posed all along that our government was
joking, and if the Detroit TO pitch a
shell into his custom house he would be
greatly aStonished on two counts. First,
that the cruiser really had any ammuni-
ton, and, second, that it meant business.
This was illustrated in 1884, when the Me-
araguans arrested an Eng4ishman for fun
and put him in jail. His home government
promptly demanded an indemnity of $4,000.
and the Nicarasuans nearly died laughing.
How droll are these Brtishers, they eX-
claimed, and went off again into fits. In a
few days warship appeared at Corinto
and the captain sent word that he would
give the officials twelve hours TO fork over
the cash. Again there were roars of merri-
ment. 1t was regarded as a solemn, pom
derous Anglo-Saxon jest. When ten hours
elapsed the captain sent WORD once more,
suggesting that non-combatants hunt COW
er, and with that he cleared the ship for
action. The officials thunderstruck.
Why didn't you tell US you meant it?' they
demanded I did,, said the captain. But.
ah, senior, they protested. you should have
added that you meant that you meant il,
and also that you intended to carry out
your Intentions The upshot of it was that
they hustled like blaZes and paid the money.
Since then they have never molested an En-
glishman.
They do all their fighting on bluff con-
tinued the veteran, and find it cheaper
than gunpowder and just as effective. Take
the last revolution, for example. Reyes
small army, mostly Americans, was march
ing up from Greytown. They could have
annihila ted the few ragamuffin soldiers
der Zelaya's general and the latter knew
it. What did he do? Why, he simply put
up a bluff 1 have 800 men behind that
HILL he said through a messenger, and
also a quantity of artillery. L am about to
say you but if you surrender quietly | will
refrain Being unused to such tactics the
Americans surrendered. The way Reyes
lost his gunboat was also exceedingly
amusing. He sent it out to eat up small
tin-clad which had been loaned to Zelaya-
The tin-clad came along, picked up the
gunboat and sauntered off with it, and that
ended the war. The incident reminds me
of the old story of the starving mechanic,
who in desperation resolved to turn high
wayman. Securing a section OF lead pipe,
he hid in a doorway, and when strapping
big fellow happened to come along he hit
him a terrific blow on the back of his bull
neck The lead pipe wrapped around the
big mans throat like scarf. and he walk
ed off with it whistling Annie Laurie
There goes my last chance said the hon
est mechanic That was the way with
Reyes. To return to the Bluefields affair."
all that is necessary for us to do is to con-
vince General Torres and his friends that
mean business. To that end threats
messages, correspondence and diplomacy
are perfectly useless 1t Is absolutely es-
sential to use a club but light swipe
will be sufficient Trouble will then in
stantly end, and all thereafter will be
peace, harmony and brotherly love"