The Caldwell tribune. [volume] (Caldwell, Idaho Territory [Idaho]) 1883-1928, 1899-10-21
too, might be prejudiced, and
low are we TO know unless we
carefully examine both sides.
Pleasantries.

The Bore; II assure you, madam, that
my dear friend here and are two souls
with but asingle thought" The Lady
Indeedl and which Of you has posses
sion Of the thought tO-day?"
Miranda Visiting city friends): any
hers her visitin' card" Miranda's Hus-
band: "What does it sayP" Miranda
at says she's at home Thursdays.
Wonder where she stops the rest Of the
timel"
Teacher: "Billy, can you tell me the
difference between caution and coward
ice" Billy: Eyes, ma'am. When
you re afraid yourself, then that's eau
tion. But when the other fellows a
fraid, that's coWardice."
Young Wife. II got a beautiful
parchment deploma from the cooking
college to-day. and I've cooked this for
you. Now guess what it is" Husband
with slab of Omelet between his teeth:
1.-THE diploma. "-IIt-BitS.
lie Ceiling a hair-breadth adventure)
"And in the bright moonlight we could
see the dark muzzlss of the wolves"
She (breathlessly): "Oh, how glad you
must have been that theyhad tho mug
zles Onl''-Sacred Heart ReUtea0.
"WhRt do you cargo to wash shirt ?"
inquired the man at the counter in the
laundry. "What kind of a shirt ?" ask
ed the clerk, with his mind on outing
shirts, dress shirts, negligees, and the
various other possibilities in that line.
"a dirty shirt" replied the man.
History is all the time having new
readings, and some of the best of them
come from the mouths os children.
when Rome was burning, the En-.
peror Nero was playing a fiddle" SO
the teacher told Robbie. and this is
what Robbie told his mother that eve.
ming. "The Emperor Nero was play.
ing a fiddle, so they burnt Rome.
DR.. Humphrey and l were standing
on the ssreet.COTneT, while he was wait.
ing for car. He suggested that it
was time to be moving over to the 9TH
or corner as the car was approaching.
said there was plenty of time. "But,"
said DR.. Humphrey, Il am a little lame
like the captain you have read about,
who shouted to his men in battle, "Ad-
vance to that hilltop and then retreat;
but since am little lame. Ill begin
10 retreat now "-Ad00nce.
A Scottish divine was greatly upset
~ the frequency and freedom of the
language used on the links by a much
'espected elder of his church. He
pointed out that such indulgences was
lnseemly, and suggested that every |
ime he gave way to a strong word he
hould put a stone in his pocket rs a re.
hinder. at the close of the play the
lder walked up to his pastor, and slow
emptied his pockets of little heap
'ebbles, saying discOnsolately: These
re the monOsyllablOs. 1 fear the 9th.
rs will need a cartl"-Chrtstian life
at beats mel" he said, as he laid
own his newspaper thoughtfully.
Whut air ye talkin' about?" asked
is wife, anxiOusly. "Literatoor," he
nSWsred. "Course we've seen it show
d up in the newspapers, time and
gin, how all an editor does is ter set
own weth pot O. paste an a pair O.
'issOrs, an cut out things ter put inter
paper" Certainly. 1 don't see
othing SO beatin' about that" "But
lis is the ques.in. Some Teller hez ter
Is them pieces up in the fust place 1t
sVOr struck me afore, but I'd like ter
now who the feller is tibet starts In an
lts up them there things fur the edit
l.