Little Falls weekly transcript. (Little Falls, Morrison Co., Minn.) 1894-19??, 1899-06-27
LOOKS LIKE TWAIN.
THE FAMOUS HUMORlST HAS A DOU-
BILE IN KANSAS.

'-tS - SAS1AkcHhs AWE UNIV SSAC
Britisher~ Once Made Life Miser-
able For Him by Insisting That He
Was the Real and Only Mark.
Mark Twain has a double and tho
double doesn't like it a bit. AS for Mark,
no one knows that he cares-in fact, 1t Ia
rather uncertain whether the great Mark
knows Of it. The double has Marks own
name, Clemens, with the pref1xed initials
of 6. G: He is a Kansas socialists law
yer by trade-and as he bears striking
resemblance to the real thing, he Is often
taken for 1t, in America and abroad.
People say that they are cousins, and the
socialist has to deny 1t every other day.
He went to Europe years ago, and people
there dined and wined him, believing that
they had the real old stuff with them.
The more he tried to explain that 1t waA
all a mistake on their part, and the mad.
der that he got, the more tiokled they
WERE
"Oh, Mr.. TWAIN" they said, "you are
so funny! Now we see through 1t all, and
you can't conceal your identity from U.S."
This is what Mr.. Clemens Of Kansas
says when "joshed" by his friends upon
his great relation: II understand that
Mark Twain Ia . man Of good natured
ability, and, had he turned his attention
10 some proper pursuit, he doub tless
would have made his way In the world,
stood we'll in society and perhaps have
been mayor of his city and perhaps COVER
nor Of some western state But he got tho
notion into his head that he could write
and threw away his chances to win i'm
mortality by appointing policemen and
notaries public. He took to writing books
even after he must have known the whole
world was laughing over his literary
illusions. He chose his career without
consulting me, and If he Is disappointed
with the result let him look to 1t and not
be saddling himself upon me by claiming
kinship. I am in no condition to stand
any foolishness. I have hard work to get
credit at my grocers' now"
IL. the year of the Russo-Turkish war
this Kansas Clemens went to Europe to
try his luck as a war correspondent. 1t
does not bear on this story, but it may be
of interest to add that he never got a
chance to show his prowess in the line of
war correspondence. Possibly his reputa-
ton was enhanced by this absence of op-
portunity Anyway, Fourth Of July Of
that year found G. G. Clemens on ship
board crossing the Atlantic. Already he
had been taken to be the only Mark, In
spite of all his statements to the contrary.
He made little speech at the Independ-
ence day celebration, but the main address
of the day was made by some unknown
who bore the title Of colonel. Clemens
having been chosen press agent, upon his
arrival in Glasgow, he took the colonies
speech to the Office Of newspaper to have
it printed, with report Of the proceed
ings. He sent his card to the editor, and
on leaving said to the editor: IF you
leave out anything, leave out my own
speech. If you print anything and leave
out the colonel's speech, can't stay here
and be safe." The next day the city was
placarded with such poster announcements
as this:
"'Mark Twain on the Old Country,
seq Glasgow Evening News"
Clemens got copy Of the paper, and
there was the oolonel's speech, to be sure
but his own led the story. Clemens tried
all sorts of arguments to prove that he
wasn't Mark Twain, but oil the editor
said was, IF you want to travel inoog.,
It's all very we'll, but cannot and will
not tell my readers that the speech that
have published as yours is not your own. "
That night Clemens went to the theates
with some of his steamer friends and
greatly to their amusement Mark Twain
gags were thrown at him from the stage.
The next day crowds Of people came to his
hotel for his signature. He wrote his own
honest mamie in their albums, and they
departed happy.
He began to be afraid that II the real
Mark Twain showed up anywhere he-the
Kansas man-would be denounced as an
imposter. So he fed to London and went
to the Inns Of Court hotel. In the next
mornings paper he saw the announce
ment, mark Twain at the Inns of Court
hotel" Now the Kansas man felt really
good, because he Rad made up his mind
to 60 to the real Mark and tell him all
.hout it. SO he asked the clerk for In.