New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1899-08-04

W. ara nuzzIed TO know whether the writer Of the
following message to Tho Tribune contemplated
marriage or suicide AS the price is the same, we
could offer no inducement either way;
Gentlemen; Please send me your prlce for
marriage OF u'''" Mrs. q. A. J.
Brooklyn. Aug. l. 1899
There was a happening at the ostrich farm re-
only which dsproves the theory that the ostrlch
Is satisfied with eating rails harped wite anu Inc Inc
ike A man who had visited the farm the uay DC
ahinkng that no might have lost it at tho farm, he
re'turned to look for H. When he arrived he en-
s1d the sTSGn Ht much hope Of ndns
watch About the hrst thing noticed ny the youth
vas @ an and would have been swallowed II It
had not a glass faced watch. II happened tnat
The next day the valuation Of one Of the birds was
enhanced $50. 1t swallowed diamond from the
setting OF woman visitor, who inadvertently
sought 10 console the bird by caressing its fore
head-(Arizona Republican.
Wong Sob. a good looking Chinaman. has hired
out as a coachman for n Philadelphia doctor Wong
learned the art OF driving in Pueblo. Col. where
he worked in n livery stable
Probable-Tommy Tompkns-I bet my pup kin
Willie Wiikins-well bet II he does hen wish
ne hadn't when my kitty grows up.-COhio state
Journal.
Not long ago an English physician was arrested
for riding a bicycle on sidewalk IL came out on
tho trial that he was on his way to Visit n very
sick patient. and he was acquitted under an old
lou allowing doctors TO take the shortest cut when
their services urgently required.
said Flooding Pete. you learns dat every time
you drinks water you puts a bunch o wild an
Yes" answered Meanderlng Mike IAN II you
drinks whiskey you has EN- In yer head' so what
a man to do?'-(Washingto star
Mrs. Mary Pidcock. of Chester, Penn. who will
be eighty-four years old the 18th inst is getting
a third set OF teeth
Teeth That Didn't Chatter.-Doctor-Did you have
Fair Patient-It seemed so.
Doctor-Dld your teeth chatter?
Fair Patient-No; they were In my dressing case.
-(New-York Weekly.
Last week an expedition OF the Liverpool School
Of Tropical Diseases sailed for Sierra Leone to
study malaria and fever during the wet season.
The expedition consists OF Surgeon Major Ross.
lecturer to tho school; H. T. Annet, demonstration
n the school; +. f. Austin. dipteroogist to the
british Museum, and DR.. s. Van Neck. Belgian
Government delegate to the Liverpool school.
At the start-The Bride (rapturously)-Oh. Jackl
The bridegroom (devotedly)-Yes, darling-and
aren't you and just everythlng?-(Brooklyn Life.
In making their monthly inspection OF the books
n queer assortment OF articles was found by the
librarians OF one OF the big public libraries In
Philadelphia. Among the articles were all kinds
OF bills-grocery bills gas bills and the like; hair
pns and hair ornaments OF every description, de-
sign and material: love letters galore. locks Of hair.
bits of lace dress samples and watch chain charms:
pen and ink pencil and crayon sketches; postal
orders and postage stamps There were many
photographs. besides an insurance policy The lat
ter was claimed by the Another queer
is made o. the books. One enterprising medicine
firm had An agent visit the library once and under
the pretence of looking at the books slipped cir
cular In each one.
The Learned acknowledgement Skinner is
student OF Dante"
''IVhat makes you think so?'
He tackled n card the door OF the last onium
Joint the police raided that bore this line Abandon
dope all ye that enter here "-(Cleveland Plain
Dealer