El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1899-03-02
THE BREAKER.

place as other peoples middle aged man,
inclined to portliness. AS the train moved
On he discussed commonplace subjects
with me in a commonplace way. I should
not have been surprised to have been told
that he was a stock broker or solicitor,
or that he was engaged in the tea trade
In the course of our chat something hap
pened to be said about curious occupations.
'sWell,'' said my companion, 81 do not
suppose that there is any moro curious
occupation than my own. am a breaker"
He had not at all the appearance of q
man used to horses, but I suggested, "A
horse breaker, you mean?"
'No," he said, "just a plain breaker;
man who breaks things-breaks any
thing that requires to be broken; gets his
living by breaking"
/ glanced nervOusly at the communi
eator, though he looked even less like a
Iunatic than he did like a horse breaker.
81 see,'' he said, smiling, THAT 1 must
explain. When left Cambridge with ii
classical degree, no prospects and no infiu-
ence looked about for a profession. l
found everything overcrowded. Besides
none of the professions appealed to me at
all. 1 like to travel about little, and l
enjoy social life. I like talking-talking
to any one 1 hate work of any kind.
This being the case, l looked about me to
see if there was not a chance for some new
professionals among our million wants
there was not one that was not supplied
1.-The idea came to me by accident. L
was stopping at my uncle's house when
he received rs present from his Wlfe's
brother a singularly ugly but very valu-
able pair of oriental vases. His wifes
brother was frequently in my uncle
house, and therefore these denominations
had to be displayed 1 heard him gruln-
bling about this. suggested that he should
sell them. The idea was of course absurd
He told me SO. Nor, he said, could he
break them himself, for his wife's brother
would never forgive him; nor could he
ask his wife to break them, because, al
though he has been married 10 years, he
felt that he did not know her we'll enough :;
nor could he ask the servants to break
them, for that would encourage careless
ness and thriftlessness. That is all right,
/ said 1 rose from my place and smashed
the vases one after the other on the floor.
Sorry 1 was so clumsy 1 said. You had
better ring and have this rubbish cleared
away He rang and told the servant that
l had broken them accidentally. When
she had gone, he said without a smile, 1t
seems rather pity. said, L am short
of ready money Could you lend me Is?
He wrote me a check for G2O and said that
| was a useful man to know of. Then L
said, Recommend me to your friends, for
already 1 saw the possibility of my future
profession He mentioned me to some
half dozen people he knew, some of whom
had never seen in my life before ihey
senB>me invitations to their houses, and
they indicated the objects on which was
to operate. In my first week L broke, L
remenib Der. a lamp shaped like an owl an
oil painting, a tea service and "a dining
room table. y
But an oil painting" L said-'-hew
does one break an oil painting?'
1T is simple enough" he said. " Hrst
of all undid the wires so that the picture
fell, then i'll picking it up put my foot
through the face. 1t was portrait of my
hosts wife's aunt. 1t was more difficult
to break the dining room table. L recoi-
lect that it became necessary for the pur-
pose to invent a somewhat boisterous form
of round game. Even then we had &c. play
it for three evenings before the legs came
off When left this house, my host hand
ed me a check and promised to recon-
mend ne to other people. l never advcr-
tise, and l have more breaking to do shan
can possibly find time for. If L could
find a young man with plenty of taat, 1
would take him as an assistant.
at must need some tact, L suggested
lit does. 1t so often happens that am
employed by the husband without the
know ledge of. the wife, or, by the wife
without the knowledge of the husband.
disIiked, but that must put up with.
The other day one of my, clients asked me
to come to his house to break, a, dinner
service l dined there and made myself
rs pleasant L could and. told. several
good stories But then L also broke the
dinner service, or most of it. and 1t was
one to which my hostess was, much at
| tached. She said to him afterward, l
will never have that brutasin. my house
againl
And what did Re say?''
He said: L fully agree, with, you, my
dear. To,the hest of my, belief the man
was drunk. If he had not been tho son of
an old college friend. l. should. never have
asked him, at all. That was, lutte
| mean, but then it was, necessary for him
to cover himself in some way, and as l
never break IA dinner service. under e25,
received some solatiun for the iniSignity
''Haya,ycu got anyengageInRntsa at pres
| ent.'' L asked.
..Yes,'' ne said. II am going to one
| now, bait it is trif1ing thing, requiring
| no tact. as all Had had an assistant
| should have sent him. l. agn to go the day
| after ii wedding reception when the pres
| ents arc being packed. Those which from
| their. ugliness or worttlIessness are not
| worth packing up and sending to the
| bridexrooms distant homo have been
|! placed on separate shelf. l shall upset
! that shelf and accidentally stamp on any
/ thing which is not broken in the fail. The
| job won't taxa five minutes, and b get
| guineas for ih. l ain doing it for the
bridegroom without the knowledge of the
bride. Men begin to deceive women very
| soon, find" 30.
[ Il have,'" said. lone or two little OF
jects in my own home which,
But at this moment the train entered
| Victoria station. and, though l managed
| to complete NY sentence, and NY com
| panion said that he would be glad at any
/ time to Oblige me, in the confusion of ON
| arrival neglected 10 take his name an,