Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1899-03-03
NEWEST IN ARITHMETIC.
EACH PROBLEM WILL PROVOKE
YOUR MlRTH.
Genuine Humor Served Up in Novel
Form - The Average Boy
Painted True to
Nature.


to bed and his brother John had three.
When they got up in the morning
James had no marbles at all and John
had eight. How did John increase his
number?
Allowing that there are twenty-four
hours in day and that a boy set to
beat carpet gives it four whacks an
hour with broomstick, how many
days will it take him to finish the
job?
An express train moves at the rate
Of ffty-fye miles an hour and tele-
graph boy at the rate of seventy. How
much faster does the boy move than
the train and what reward does he
gain for humping himself in that fash
ion?
A tramp who is moving at the rate
or fourteen miles an hour has forty
rods start Of q dog moving at the rate
Of % miles an hour. What distance
will be covered before the dog is near
enough to take hold?
There are twenty EIGHT panes of glass
In the windows Of certain old mill.
A boy - years old passes the mill
twice per day on his way to and from
school. At the end Of ten days how
many panes will be left and how long
will the teacher have to lick the boy
before he will own up that he even
broke one?
a 40 " owl, fnya
q birthday present After sixteen boys
have helped him to ''play STAGE for an
hour the fragments Of the cart are val
ued at IL cents. How much was lost
or gained?
a. cat walking on a back fence must
move at the rate of 100 miles an hour
to escape a cucumber hurled at her by
a boy. What fraction of an hour would
be consumed in moving twenty feet?
Henry is sent to the store for quart
of molasses. On his way home thirteen
different boys are allowed to taste of
the contents to make sure that the
grocer didn't put up vinegar instead.
When Henry gets the jug back he
| swings it around his head to show his
| muscle, and the bottom is knocked out
against lampposf. How many hours
after the boy reaches home does he
get over aching?
| Being sent to deliver a peck Of po-
| tatoes, a grocer's boy consumes fifteen
minutes looking through knothole at
game of baseball, ten minutes more
inspecting the cellar for new house;
eight minutes in jawing with mes
senger boy WHO says he can lick him;
four minutes in looking into a show
window and six minutes further in fol
lowing up an ambulance. How much
time was lost in all and how long
would it have taken him to deliver two
pecks?
A boy has twenty feet to go to reach
a fence, while goat has forty-two feet
TO go to reach a boy. The goat moves
one-third faster than the boy, and both
put in their best ticks. BY how many
inches did the goat miss the target
and how long did the boy sit on the
| fence making up faces at him?
William has a top worth cents, a
hunk Of putty worth 1 cent, novel
worth 5 cents and door knob worth
| 3 cents. He trades them all with
James for roller-skate worth cents
| and a 1shline worth cents. Did he
| gain or lose, and how much?
A fire engine which has half a mile
to go moves at the rate of twenty miles
an hour. When it reach the scene of
conf1agration it finds that boy who
started five rods behind it got there
| ten rods ahead of it. What was the
boys rate of speed per hour and how
fast would be move if sent on an er-
rand by his mother?-John Brisben
Waller in Chicago News.