The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1899-09-08
miscellaneous
AND HE DID.

Theodore Shy was an exceedingly
bashful man, and when, after much
debating in his mind, lie decided tt
take wife, his thoughts at once turn
ed to a matrimonial paper as the best
means for attaining his object. No
that he was unacquainted with any
being on whom ne would have beer
willing to confer the title OF Mrs
Theodore Shy. But such was his in
nate bashfulneas that he dreaded hi.
determination being ascertained b,
his friends aud himself consequently
ridiculed. Chaffed he would certainly
have been, but as Theodore was in
every respect an eligible party there
was no reason to expect ridicule.
Theodore Shy at the time of contem
plating this most serious step was
thirty-six years of age. Passably good.
looking, good natured, 4 'good-natured
silly fellow" he was sometimes styled
b, his borrowers), he possessed a good
house, a good income, and all he re.
quired was good wife to make his
home happy.
While matters were at this stage
Theodore was brought to full stop,
and for this reason; he could not con.
coct suitable advertisement.
"Of course" he said, 81 don't want
an old wife, but can't advertise that
Iwant a pretty young girl-and shall
certainly want her to be good-looking.
And what else? Let me see. Modest,
musical, domestic, loving, cuddlesome
hang it all. can't do it. II it was
ever discovered to be my advertise
ment, should never hear the end of
it."
He was in dilemma for two days.
when he determined to ask the advice
of lady friend-a young widow who
had often commiserated him on his
solitary lot. Its surprising that being
SO bashful he should have actually
have sought the advice Of a lady, and
that lady, too, one who would possibly
have no objection to becoming Mrs
Theodore Shy herself. But, strange
to say, that had never occurred to him.
Mrs. Ready was an old friend whom
he had known before her marriage,
and was the only person he felt be
could take into his confidence, being
assured of her sympathy and discreet
ness. She had married when only
nineteen a young lieutenant in the
army, who, three months afterward,
was inconsiderate enough to leave his
wife a widow. She was at this time
twenty-five years of age and exceed
ingly pretty. Theodore often thought
that she bore strong likeness to the
widow in whose eyes Uncle Toby en-
deavored to find the imaginary some
thing. He had not, however, consid-
cred the possibility of her likeness in
character to the aforesaid widow, and
acting on his first impulse he lost no
time in paying the relict of the late
Lieutenant Ready visit.
He saw the young widow in her
and she met him with
hand and a smile of welcome.
After talking of the weather of yes.
terday, the prospects of ditto for today
and tomorrow, Theodore sought an
opening to the subject of his call.
Il wish to seek your advice On a
matter of great import t. myself"
"Yes 81
"There is no one else of whom l
should care to ask this advice, and feel
ing assured of your sympathy and help
determined to be guided by your
counsel, if you would be SO good as to
give it.''
The widow, much surprised and i'm
pressed by his seriousness, repressed
her inclination to laugh and said she
would be pleased to help him in any
way in her power.
THANK you, you are very good"
and taking the widows hand Theo-
dore rather profusely expressed his
gratitude. well the fact is" he said,
-; ,;sk har ho~I ah el,
made no attempt to withdraw, 81 am
contemplating marriage and knowing
you-knowing you to be"
Yes 90 said the widow demurely.
knowing you to be more eXperien-
ced in such matters, and being so kind
so good-so-"
Here the pretty widow blushed and
looked even lovelier than ever.
"Yes ~ she said in a low tone, NOV
ing little nearer to him. And"
"And 80 disinterested."
Here she gave him an unutterable
look of reproach.
~ thought could not do better than
ask your advice as to the lady wish
to marry"
Mrs. Ready looked puzzled. Was he
not going to propose after all?
"Who is the lady ?'
"Well, all, the fact is don't know"
Don't know ~
No" he went on hurriedly. "You
see ! expect there will be great deal
of chaff at such an old bachelor as my
self getting married, aud l am anxious
to avoid it."
Theodore had. by some process of
come to believe he was too
old to dream of marriage. The widow
thought otherwise and ventured to say
so.
"Well, at any rate" he said, my
friends think SO and would ridicule the
idea, so I've been thinking of using the
columns of matrimonial paper for the
purpose"
The widow looked aghast.
What do you .ant me to do then ~
"The fact is," he confessed, II can't
write such an advertisement as l
would like, and want you to help Inc
to word one, if you will be so kind"
Mrs Ready was amazed and not a
little disappointed. She had tried her
best to create an impression on this
man, and the only impression that she
had left was that she would make a
good counsellor; and now he came to
ask her advice as to whom he had
better marry. She thought she knew,
but unfortunately it would not do to
say SO.
Writing materials being on the table.
the widow sat down and took a sheet
of paper on which to commit notes.
First of all" said the lady, what
sort Of wife do you want p
This was a staggerer. Theodore eX-
amined the pattern of the carpet, the
ceiling, the mantle and half dozen
things, and then turned his eyes to the
widow, on whom he gszed intently.
1t seemed that he now for the first
time fully recognized her charms.
Really" he said, II cannot describe
the sort of lady l should like. Ions see,
it seems SO foolish, especially for me-"
"Well, then" replied hi, companion,
who had apparently received an in
spiratiop. 81 will suggest such and