Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1899-07-26
HIS SUPERIOR KNOWLEDGE.
A Philosophers Opinion of Facts Fanc
op,1 Iyocfc IIeefuI

and Facts Useful.
Nine times thirteen an seven-eights
is ere ah!-lemme see" muttered
a farmerish-appearing man, sitting in
q corner Of the lounging-room of a
tavern at Pettyville and frowningly
coming document resembling bill
for goods purchased.
"Ah! my friend!" genially inter-
rupted recently arrived stranger, a
ramshackle parsonage with a long.
meditetive face and considerable hair,
'''I see you are deep in some interest
ing calculation.
"Yepr
"Quite so! To me there is nothing
more absorbing than the study of
figures and statistics. dote on them.
There is strong fascination in reduc-
ing to actual figures the haphazard
guesses of the average mind. The
possibilities for interesting calcula-
tions are all about us, if we but keep
our eyes open, and yet how many
people are blind or Indifferent to
them! For instance, did you ever
think to estimate how long it would
take grasshopper Of given size, which
would, were he physically perfect.
jump given number of feet and
inches per hop, and make certain
number of hops per minute, but is
handicapped by being lame in one
leg which reduces his hopping ability
one-third in length but not in fire.
quency, to Jump around the world at
the tropic Of Capricorn?"
, "Nope!" was the reply of the far
mer, who was still frowning on his
bill. s'Never see how I could make n
cent out of it. !"
''True. But how can man occupy
his time more proftably than by ac-
quiring information which will be of
great satisfaction and perhaps positive
value to him at some future time? Yet
how few avail ourselves of the oppor-
tunities which are all llaround us! Now,
I venture to say you have no concep-
tion of the quantity of wheat that you
would be obliged to possess if you
were to bestow upon the owner of q
checker board one grain for the first
square on tho board, two. grains for
the second, four grains for, the third,
and so on, doubling the number of
grains for each succeeding square?"
"No," was the moody reply. 81
hain't'
EXACTLY! And I presume you can
not tell how long it would take to bail
Lake Titicaca dry with common
tablespoon? Perhaps you do not
know how many bones there are in
the skeleton of IN ichthyosaurus, nor
how many times the word tooth oc-
ours in Holy Writ, nor the rapidity
with which the mongoose will multiply
if left unmolested, nor the date of the
death of Pope Adrian, nor"
"No," answered the agriculturist,
turning at last like the proverbial
worm, but still glaring at the docu-
ment in his hands. mo; an there's
lots of other things that don't know,
either. On the other hand, do you
know old Levi Grabbenheimer, who
runs the 'One Price Emporium
around the corner yonder?"
"No, sir; I can not say that do.
"Wa'al, then, if you don't know
him he'll be pizon sure to skin you
alive the first time you have any deal
ms with him, same s he's tryin' to
do me now with this ere bill. I might
know all about the jumpin' ability Of
a given frog, the quantity of water in
Lake So-an'-so, an what slew the late
Pope What's-his-name, without the
knowledge maxim me an ounce fatter
or nickel richeS but if didn't
know old Levi, an know him blame
we'll, into the bargain, I wouldn't have
enough financial pelt left on me by
this time to- make fashionable-sized
watch pocket. G. day, sirl I'm goin'
over now to whoop the old scoundrel
up little. Tom P. Morgan, in
Puck.