The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-06-15
FAT DRUMMEns GETTING RARE
Conjuring Has Caused n Revolution in the
Methods of the Trade.

sighed the shoe house drummer. who was tall
and thin and solemn looking. and might have
been taken for either a minister or an undcr-
taker ITS going TO the dogs
What's the matter with it, inquired his
sympathizinG friend.
The matter with it p echoed the shoe
drummer, Matter enough. Look at me-
Il could look at you with better effect were
We to adjourn to the cafe"
"Oh. hang it all. man. I'm not Joking
mo more am l. This weather does not adj
NIT OF jokes. Spiel on"
What i was going to say continued the
shoe house drummer. " is that no one would
take me for the traditional knight Of the grip
sack. u representative Of tho great commercial
interests of this country"
Possibly not" agreed the sympathizing
friend. " But why wouldn't thcyt'
Pm too thin" answered the drummer in q
doeful voice.
"Thinf' said the sympathizng friend, lift
ing his eyebrows. What in the name Of the
three witches has that got TO do with it."
Everything" gronned the shoe house drum
mer. What's your ideal Of a commercial
traveller?'
"A rubicund. CHEEKY faced fellow with an
engaging smile. an infectious good humOr. an
explosive joy. capacity for various vinous.
malt and spirituous liquors. controlled only by
the limits Of the expense account and a foud-
ness for Rabelaisian anecdote."
Exactly" commented the drummer. DO
fill the bill 2"
Well to be frank. old man." laughed tho
sympathizing friend. you bear about as much
resemblance to the ideal drummer as Don
Quxote does to Jack Fastafr."
Now that you're talking" said the shoe
, how many q The fellows you know in this
Iathizing friend. after he had reflected for
Right again" asserted the SHOE house
drummer with melancholy smile Fat
drum mers are as rare as 1amingoes III
What's the cause, of this, sudden melting of
al! too solid tlesh?" asked the sympathizing
trade is responsible for IT, The boys Of tho
that drummer worth his salt Ind to he an
alcohol immune. lie had to be able to drink an
so M BUT Changed
crate days cant aSr3 to cntVat t an artistic
a WHAT" Gasred the sympathizng. friend.
narlor entertainer5m,,a prestdigitator-a
II think do" said the sympathizing friend,
Welt, that's why the business is going to
the dogs" continued thesn house drummer.
IN bitter voice: 81 fellow ism able to sell
bill OF goods In the country now without hyp-
nothing The, merchant and reelinG on dozen
TRICKS Oh, I've been at IT a year now. and I'm
one. make dollar bills change into tens. l
change queen Of clubs into an ace OF hearts
ard eyetryThere go give gratis exhibitions
u should think that there'd be lots OF fun
mi said the symrathiznG friend
What thought at i,rst Al! The boys who we're
customers told me that there was more fun In
taking half dollars from mans nose than In
s nd You %r hg pa be
lieve those boys. They are willies II they
sprine that gag on YOU. I've got enough pres
Il T psn working the sleight. OF hand racket
shoe house drummer. but the sympathizing
friend interrupted him.
tho sa0qs1 hs s oGy praeteel your arts in
-" Oh, we'll. it's tho same thing" remarked
the shoe house drummer. With shrug Of his
Rochester and other country towns is that
Rochester owns u part OF the board of Arbitra-
King pin: ,necromsn act. and th S t"f
had ne hep. proprietor Of one Of the big shoe
good. Never saw a man so astonisned in ali
ny ne; i iugGIed away cards. coins:
an alligator swallows doughnuts He list
gogg ed his eyes on ME and gaspeu whenever
had him put down in my little book Tor couple
OF thousand plunks. But didn't rush in and
p sm nd Jed os@S sSG
ing. Finally ] saw my opening and sailed in.
realm. vintage Of, %, and tossed it on the
wide The proprietor, looked at It closely and
| said IT was all right. Hight YOU are. says l.
p% % esr hG ,P PSs my I ssnsDe
=. am says he; do your worst
-" Now watch mo close says l.
"'Then put out your hand says I. as solemn
as a nlnn who reads tho comic supplements of
He held out his paw. and tossed the dollar
Ike Ike obster cawne s gravel T 'G smiled ' Ike I
| fancied keliar would smile in II similar stun
SEa ss E9 b S9 il n b.
dollar once get my hand on it. Open, your
ast go c;omrm agnls The old curmplrSon
there on his palm was twsnty-dollar god
. D%SA capital trick he exclaimed; a capital
." think SO myself said complaccntly.
But what's become OF the dolarT he
Oh Ianswercd jauntily: that was trans
his T"ckc ' that "s y? yam s%s f "2
making money. It's sort Of % TO / scheme.
"' Here. give me back my money. gasped.
| Your money 2 he said. with an air of as
constituent. oh. yes to lie sure. to he sure. ,
! And the, old guy took a silver dollar from the
tlla nd handed II to he me.
II laughed like fellow with the cramps.
! but thought the old fellow was playing lit
| tie Joke oil me, so dn,t say anything. hung
| around trying to sell him some goods. but he
told me that he had Just stocked up from an
| other concern. | STAYED around. however. but
never word did Mr. Shoeman say. After
man must be going home. / enjoyed your
| little enterta inment Immensely. Drop in when
you re round this way again
| And blank me" said the shoe house drum :
| mer, but was so completely dashed that
| couldn't say word"
sympath2ng friend,
| "Eot a damn word"
| Tho sympathi2inG friend looked reproach-
| fully at the shoe house drummer and sighed
| Billy" he said. solemnIy, the drinks are