The evening times., 1899-02-06
TROUBLE ON THE L ROAD.
The Ticket Seller, the Chopper, and
the Book That Said "Must.''

the Book Thats Said "Must."
(From the New York Sum-
1t was at an uptown station of the
Sixth Avenue Elevated Railroad in the
neighborhood of recent big fire. The up
town track was blocked by the fire and
the uptown trains were being switched
onto the downtown track at Eighth Street
and sent north on that track to the next
switch, which Is at Fifty-ninth Street.
great deal of confusion naturally resulted
and there was some excuse for both the
ticket seller and the ticket chopper to be
out OF temper. The ticket seller had been
wrangling with passengers who wanted to
go down town and demanded their money
back after depositing their tickets in the
box and learning that the trains were not
| running down town. The ticket chopper
had been wranglng with the same would
be passengers who demanded back their
chopped tickets.
train came along at this moment and
one of the guards tossed off note. The
| ticket chopper grabbed it. 1t was an Or
| der to the station agent on the uptown
| side to send all the uptown passengers to
! the downtown station. The chopper called
| the colored porter and hustled him across
| the track with the order. Then he went
| inside.
Il shust send an orter ofer to dod oder
| weller by der uptown site alretty," he
| said to the ticket seller.
''Vod!" demanded the ticket seller.
'Vod vos dod? We're dit you ged dod
orter?"
From auf der drain und send it quvick
! alretty,' answered the chopper
You didn' done it," declared the seller.
81 dell you l dit done it, said the chop
| per.
You are loafer. Vod mage you dell
me you dit done it, ven you couldn't done
| it, snorted the seller.
Il done gare vod you said | couldn't
did done it alretty," snorted back the
chopper.
You vas a pig tam fool; dod's vod you
vas. You god no comprehension. You
| know you couldn't done it, so how could
| you done il, ven you couldn't done it?"
| snorted the seller again.
Il say you vos liar shouted the chop
! per. Il dit done It, n | dit done ii if
couldn't done it. l dond gif tam. | did
done it n dod's all dere vos apout il"
Ivy, man. came back the seller, you
vas crazy. You think / dondt know der
pook? Here, you WOOL. vod does this say
He took little paper covered book OF
rules from the money drawer. and with
his index finger emphasizing each word
he read slowly:
-orders-must- be delivered at
once-to-the-agen -charge-at the
| SldIioll- NHtIt tIitf dlF AS'N'hNN-
| Now he demanded. ',vot does must
mean? | say vot does must mean?"
Il don'd care about der pook tam /
dell you | dit done it, snorted the chop
per, 'un dots all dere vos apout it.
dit done it,
How gould you done it ven der pook
| says 'must?'" demanded the seller, his
face an apopleetic red. ta'Vod does must
! mean? You couldn't done it. Der book
| 'r1uct NpT vnu irwin fp off any-
! ways? Must, must. must,
You vos Won tam fools yourselves, :"
shouted the chopper Il dit done it und |
don'd let you gall a liar again. | dit
done it. II l couldn't done it l don
know; put dit done it und l dit
| Then they glared at each other through
the grating. Finally, the seller blurted
Such liar, sayin you did done it ven
you couldn't done it. Der book says
must Dots English, und If der orter
come here il must come 10 me. See,
must must How could you done it?
You didn't done it, dots all, You
couldn't"
The chopper was dancing with rage
now, and he shouted back: Il dell you ]
dit don't it und / know vod / done und
dit done IL. | gif der orter TO der Niger
und send it TO dod odder vellers und your
/ pigger tam vools as l.
Il don'd gare yod you say you done -
shouted the seller You didn't don il
cause der pook says must, und you
couldn't done it.
AT this moment the colored porter came
in with the order. Boss he said. 'the
uptown man says o. k He handed the
order TO the seller 10 be filed
There, there exclaimed the seller
triumphantly. didn't say so? Don'd dei
pook say must und didn't it? Yod voI
you come lyin' arount to me sayin' you
dit done vot you couldn't done?
The chopper went back TO his choppine
machine as the seller muttered; Such
tam vools dose choppers are, sayin' he
dit done vot he couldn't done! Der gom-
pany ought TO get some intelligence men!
Such vools,"