The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1899-05-14
BILIOUS MANS COON HUNT.
A LAMENT GROWLED ar WHILE
GETTING OJER n EFFECTS.
No Coons, but n Remarkable Coon Dog
Loss OF tile Whiskcy and Discovery of
Uses for Jersey Lightning Encounter

talk about coon hunting at this time OF the
year. but there are cxtenuating circumstances
In the first place no coons were killed second
ly. the dog would probably have climbed n treo
himself II he had found one. and lastly. Hen
Volt told n victim Of one OF these hunts that
although he has lived at whitehall. man and
boy. for nigh on to seventy years. he has never
known a coon to be killed on those particular
hills. But tho Cheerful Liar. who personally
conducts the expeditions. saws they are coon
hunts and that settles the matter. He has or
Gnnized ono every Saturday night for two
years, and saws he is going to keen right on.
The Cheerful Liar is n business man pri-
marty. and n naturalist. ornitholoRist and
botanist on the side. Moreover. he is fond OF
walking. in season and out. and thinks every
one else should be. In consequence. he goes
coon hunting and invites his friends. and then
spins yarns which they cannot in decency con-
tradict after having enjoyed his open-air and
pcripatetic hospitality but he made a mistake
the other day and the hollow mockcry has
been exposed. A wanderer. who is known
as Bilious Pete. returned to the city
one Friday and called on thu Cheer
full Liar. lie was promptly pressed into
service as a coon hunter and this is the
story that he growlcd out TO his friends while
nursing his feet during tho following week.
As it would hardly do to give 1t In his lofty and
sensational language. 1t will be told in the
usual way. On Saturday afternoon tho bilious
one met the Cheerful Liar by appointment at
the ferry, ..,
and he. handed over s9methlng 'a Carefully
wrapped In paper. The bilious one felt OF I
supply of sandwiches here continued the
hist his aI gSlnt!ipNs oW TO q tl SaG as SSs that i hs had %s u RSSs
Just time to catch the ferry"
boarding the ierry6oat. they crossed to
After lighting their cigars and making them
selves comfortable in the smoking. car they
began to exchange news. and got so thoroughly
having reached whitehall As they walked
along the road in the twilight toward the
hunting toys and was to get a suit OF the same
kind for his guest. the Cheerful Liar suddenly
exclaimed:
T ISSay; talking is dry r what do you say H.. hin
pocket with the air OF one wh? was used to it
age was gone. While ioliing in his seat in. the
smoking IN ear i had Eaa been se pushed Iit up out e HEh his
the full horror OF the, situation dawned upon
them they were speechless with disgust, for it
t E&s i The @li iooE Ie fh nt d aSale othe sai i1 sile at b f@T a
few moments Then they began to swear
softly and they both swore at the same person.
suppose | came hunting for; anyway That
stuff was so per cent; proof. cured for Ave
years III the WOOl, anu ldu Il DOuNlutI llhc all
Old wine. Well, l must say you are a -"
and the Luciferian litany began again. w
nothing sRf 1se Else n'q 1h S%m Te tSr e so the n chss;r aPfl Liar
insisted that 1t should proceed. While they
were changing their clothes he moaningly
ment the man climbed into Che iiioft and after
john. OF Jersey lightning. guaranteed to DEFY
insulation and not only to cover the historic
SPOT spot b but to , create rSnoDt tsr tS.i or a f9ur more and . The
drinking. the health Of their host to the detri-
ment OF, their own they filled the tiask which
Ed Volt. who owns the coon dog whose name
the, Cheerful Liar has made famous in
away on the mountain side. In order to reach
him and begin the hunt properly. they took tho
short cut through the woods toward his house.
started. but after they had stumbled over Il
couple Of glacial m.oraines, a dismal swamp or
and man never trod before rs the poet says.
the Cheerful cert e h Liar bumped in int 9n a GiaIEbsd:Wire
You stay here" no said 70 the man Of bile
and III wander around and seq i | cant find
judging from the sounds that issued from the
darkness he found a whole lot Of other things
Berkley's theory Of the ideality Of matter BY
s%tubbinK his toe on a Jagged piece OF serpen;
first into a clump Of cat ,briars. and believed
with Schopenhauer that this is a world Of sor-
row. 4 little more lopnderinG brought him to
a realizing sense of the fact that he was lost
again and didn't know which way to go to find
his guest; ,o ro,,o, .poto,"
But the man OF bile was resting. and per-
haps there was a slight thought OF, vengeance
III etf mint mn his X ASiea. 2 Snt f n vain the T fnseT a% tISs
occurred to tho bilious one. and creeping Gui-
city. toward his host, until, within a few yards
which he is famous in three Western counties.
over which It has been heard simultaneously,
exclaim as he heard the click of a revolver.
and the Cheerful Liar didn't shoot.
,o They yn he!d q 6rlSt Gophs Nt aniS o ahd then ,sn theXy
them, Then the Cheerful Liar raised his
armed hand and fired Ave cartridges in rapid
cheer was heard in the DISTANCE which he rec
"SGized as that Of ia Host; Il ThSy anSTeTed It
emily there was a crashing In the, bushes, and
an odor that could not be mistaken. Like a
Planet whiriing through chs space an and o corry5in Ing
bounded up to them redo!ent Of many victories.
After receiving his frisky greetings. the bilious
On" Il Ft' you &c don't mind. 3 he SAID. !"lIwSoaltd ike
to know IL this dog hunts by eye or hyearT
Lynx he hunts by the scent OF course"
We'll. i he does. / GiSre we don't catch any.
thing tonight that hHlI be able to smell above
At this point I'D Volt appeared silently from
among the trees. After 3 greeting and intro,
inquired with q tone OF mild disgust,
but how did you come to lose the track 2"
We couldn't see it in the dark" said the
Cheerful Liar.
Wei. II you couldn't you could feel it,"
Hold on. there" said tho Cheerful Liar. do
you suppose was going to your house on
my hands and knees p
There's no need Of doing that said Ed.
a beaten track always feels hard to your feet
while tho rest of the ground in the woods is
soft and covered with twigs that crackle. You
oughter have known YOU were OF the track
on the first step you took ava from it,
This bit Of wood craft and night, craft
s~ilenced the two city men, and they followed
their skiltul leader, Presently. the Cheerful
Liar Inquired. referring to Eds father:
is Hen coming with us tonight r. -,
No" said Ed. he told mo that his head
didn't hang exactly that way tonight, This
touch OF local color made them both wish for
the sake Of pure literature that Mr.. Howells
was one of the party.
While these things were happening they
were climbing up the mountain side. and, the
dog could be heard from time to time rushing
hither and thither among the trees ahead OF
them. They walked In conn arative silence
until they reached n winding country road.
incloSed by stone fences. that skirted tho al
| most precipitous hillside. Thore they sat and
looked out over the valley tlecked with dim
lights and were beginning to think r~oetical
things. A short distance ahead OF them they
could hear a rivulet tinkling and murmurlng
down a rocky gorge. and the charm Of the
opening leaves and spring flowers was in the
air. But before they had time to get ~poetical
the coon dog emitted Il howl as weird and COM