Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1898-08-10
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'Platonic lovers always fall desperat.
ly in love with each other"
Wife (enthusiastically)-How NM.
do you think we took In at tho =
zaar? Husband (quietly)-How man
you mean.-Boston Traveller.
Mr.. Hunker-I have merely snaa,
ing acquaintance with Miss Throoe
morton. Mr.. Spatts-You are Won.
lucky; all her other acquaintance ar,
listening acqualntances.-Judge.
Druggist-See here. Why didn't Van
tell that customer that We had SOM
thing just as good? New clerk-Becaps.
he was after some postage stamps
Puck.
"Old Grabber ought to be satise0,
with the money he has" He /,
satisfed-so much SO that he wants a
lot more of exactly the same kind
Tit-Bits.
Sarah OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES trumn,,
Alice OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES stupidlty
Why, trumps was the card l turned IN
at the end Of the deal-whatever tha,
was.-7Judge.
Before man is thirty he falls IN
love with every pretty girl he looks ar
"YesT and after he is thirty he fall,
In love with every pretty girl who look,
at him. Chicago Record.
you have looked upon my face for
the last time" he resolutely declared
as he put on his hat. what are Won
going to do she cried; raise ybs.
kers !"-Chicago Daily News.
Lady-Now that you have partaken
of good dinner, are you equal to the
task Of saving some wood? Tramp
Madam, equal is not the proper word;
I'm superior to it.-Chicago News.
Washington belle Ito young naval OF.
ficer-I suppose the hardshlps of your
life at times, Lieutenant Slnecure, are
simply frightful. "Ya'as, very. Tba
cost Of gold braid alone Is something
feahful."
81 saw fine specimen of Whlstlers
art yesterday" said the girl who likes
pictures. Excuse me-" said Mrs
Cumrox, gently; but you mean YOU
heard it. don't you, dearY-Washing
ton Star.
"Now that your son Is partner In.
stead of clerk, Mr.. Hardly does he
help you in your business as much as
formerly a good deal more" THAT'S
fine" Yes; he never shows up at the
office now"
Benedick scanning the butchers bin
What's this? A shilling pound for
shoulder of mutton? 1t seems to me
that's rather high. Mrs. B.-Yes, dear;
but you know that high shoulders an
fashionable just now.-Tit-Bits.
I'm proud of you,' said the head Of
the firm. Il have letters from all over
Kansas saying that they have seen our
samples. How In the world did you
manage it?' and he patted the travel,
ing man on the back. Cyclone"
"Ah," said gentleman who was
monopolizing the conversation, st Is
easy enough to be good on $1,000
year; but some of us have to be good
for nothing, and'-looking round in
self-satisfied way-"some of us arer
Mistress-Get dinner to-day on the
gasoline stove, Bridget. Bridget-Plaze,
mum, did thry, but tn stove wint out,
n nj
Yis, mum, but it's not come back yit. Il
whit out trough tn roof.-New York
Weekly.
'Thackeray master Of style" re
peated Chollie to the earnest person
my deah fellaw, you pawsitively don't
know what you are saying. I've Seen
dozens of pictchaws Of the old Johnny
and not one of them showed coat that
had the least approach TO fit."-Cl.
cinnati Enquirer.
Author-How do you like my new
play? Critic-It's simply great. The
robbery in the third act is the most
realistic piece of work l ever saw on
the stage. Author (pleased)-Do you
really think SO? Critic-Of course
do. Why even the words spoken by
the thieves are stolen.
Mr.. Wellwood-How did you Ike
Nine. Medley? Miss Highrocks-she
was wretched. Mr. Wellw00d-lm as
tonished to hear you say that. thought
she was in fine voice. Miss HighrocRs-
Oh, her voice may have been all rign-
but I'm sure the gown she wore ne'@
could have been made In Parls.-Cae'e
land Leader.
"The mask Is torn off thy face! sue
cried, with all the vehemence OF 'ne
woman scorned, land the cloyen HUI
is revealed The unworthy lover cow
cred back. That" he muttered, TOT n'
was not unconscious of his dehclenee',,
doubtless arises from the fact tna'
cannot open my mouth without pu'uns
my foot In it"-Detrot journal.
Dear mev' exclaimed the girl WIN
pensive, brown eyes and Ink Oh Nv,
fingers, 81 wish | had entered scnVO'
a year sooner" "What Is the mal'e,'
dear?' Things are In such an upse'