The record-union., 1898-09-04
THE UNROLY TELEPHONE.
SOME OF THE FRANKS TT PLAYS
BOTH DAY AND NIGHT.
1t Has No Etiquette or Delicacy
Though Many Are It's Serv-
ices to Mankind


1t has long been noticed by careful
observers that the telephone as an ad-
Junct to civilization has done many
marvellous and unlooked-for things. 1t
has shortened distance, but it has also
doubtless increased profanity among
mankind. By reason of the fact that
ones identity is not revealed it has led
to fraud, vulgarity, flirtations, and
practical joking to a larger scale than
ever practiced before.
1t is said that certain Sacramento
restarauteur has had more trouble over
orders that We're sent in by wags-"just
for fun"-than over all his other troub-
les combined. The same kind of a COM
pla1nt comes from San Francisco and
| from every town of any Importance in
the country
Send five oyster loaves to room p, .
| tsuch and such a street, sounds like
| a buSlnesS-like transaction, especially
If the voice making the order over the
telephone says it is the voice of a we'll
| known customer; yet just such orders
| have often been sent to the alleged ad-
dress, only to find that the person liv-
ing there was wholly innocent of
| giving the order, or that the place
| named was a vacant lot
The Record Union is only one
newspaper in hundreds that have
learned through the telephone some of
the characteristics, if you please, of
women. As a point in illustration:
| During the great Corbett-FitZsimmon
prize fight the telephones in this office
rang quite often, and many of the ca
| hot hp
were the voices of women who would
not give their names. In some in
stances they confessed to a morbid de-
sire to know the result, though they
said they had never attended prize
fights and had no desire to see one.
Some weeks ago a doctor, who had
been very busy all day, was awakened
by the ringing of his telephone.
Who is there?" he asked.
Mrs. Jones'" said the voice at the
other end of the line.
What is Wrong?"
''Oh, come up right away" said
she, for baby is very sick. He awoke
hoarse and is crying now
rs he near you?"
Yes, right here by the telephone"
Hold him up and let me hear him
| cry"
The babe was held up, the telephone
was in good order, and the sleepy
doctor heard the haorse crying of the
child. The telephone told the story
of the labored breathing.
HE has Group" said the doctor
land it will not be necessary for me
to- come up. Do what 1 tell you and
all will be well.''
The doctor then told the excited
mother what to do and the child was
saved, though the doctor lost the OPP
portunity to charge mileage.
The telephone is a most ill-mannered
member of society. On a recent oc-
casion in this city a wellknown pro-
fessional man was engaged in his of
fee on private and important business
! The telephone rang and got his ear,
though a dozen respectable citizens had
been waiting at the outer gates for
hours to see the man for just a mo-
ment.
| This illustrates that the telephone
/ has no etiquette and that when it
wants to see you its appeals are in
vincibe When it lends its voice TO
the entire public how is the patron Of
the noisy thing to tell whose voice it is
that calls? 1t may be his wife, his
sweetheart, his banker, or his doctor.
| There is no way to tell until one
bushes the intermittent ringing of its
sharp bell-and then it is too late to
say one is not at home.
| There are many points yet to be set
| tied regarding the legal phases of the
telephone. Men have accepted service
| of legal process by telephone, thou
| sands have been interviewed by news
papers in the same way, While the
| courts show that breach of promise
suits have been based on proposal
made over the telephone.
The weird instrument plays so many
| tricks when wires are crossed and
when atmospheric conditions are aJal
that no man can swear by the card
that this or that sound is the voice OF
friend or foe A man is just as likely
as not to ring up his bitterest enemy
by mistake or to take his friend for
stranger and refuse to grow warm IN
| the conversation.
| In it's manifold phases there is much
| in the telephone to attract the atten-
! ton Of mankind. now drawing forth
| the admiration and now the condemna-
| tion of those who use the talking ma
chine either for pleasure or during the
| rounds of their daily cares. But who
would do without it?