davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Advica of fha Critic

"At your request" said the kindly critic to the young author, "I have read your book from beginning to end. |"
 "So good of you, returned the young author. And now I want you to feel that you can speak frankly and tell me just what you think about it. suppose you saw a great deal i'll it that you would change if it were left to you.
 Moo" replied the kindly critic thoughtfully. "On the whole I think I may say tEere was very little
 "Reallyp' exclaimed the young au- thor delightedly. "Do you know I had an idea you'd tear the whole book to pieces, fguratively speaking, of course. l can't tell you how pleased I am. But of course there are some changes that you would advise relative to the pubIi- cation of 8 second edition. What are they?'
 "There's only one that's of much i'm portance, " explained the critic.
 And that?' said the young author inquiringly.
 Why, that's where the hero jumps from the yacht into the ocean to save the heroine from drowning" l"
 ls 1t too thrilling? Wouldn't you have him jump after her?'' inquired the young author anxiously.
 "No, it's not too thrilling" was the reply, land of course would have him go in after her; but, you see, they re both rescued I wouldn't have that
 "You-you .Jouldn't have them res cued?"
 "Certeinlv not Let them h0th drown.
 But this happens in the first chap ter-almost the first thing in the book. ''
 ' Precisely. That's just when 1t ought to happen. Chicago Post
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
She Will Teach Bonnet Making.

Mile. Valentine About. daughter O Edmond About, the author is going t. open ''class i'll hat and bonnet mak ing" Everybody ill Paris is surpriscc at the necessity for it, as during hi. lifetime About kept open house in hi: hotel on the Rue de Donai, and a fet, that he gave to the Authors society il the chateau he had just bought at POn toise is remembered as almost princely By what reverse of fortune About family were left destitute uobody seem to know Although he himself began life humbly'as the son of a grocer, hi daughter was a brilliant young society woman brought up iu luxury, and every DOuy auIIIIIlIs Gno courage witI which she has undertaken to solve tht difficult problem of the Struggle fol life. "-Boston Woman's Journal
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
An Actors Speech.

The oratorical and speechmaking habit on the part of some of the stage luminaries often leads to striking if not ridiculous results. De Wolf Hopper decked out as Spanish soldier of the sixteenth century, in the act of reciting the performances of the immortal Casey ie case in noint. Conld anvthino more absurd be imagined than Francis Wi. son, n tue costume of a yagabonG. mak- ing a serious speech, assalling his ene- mics and hurling figures of speech at his detractors To be called on for Q speech when robed in such habiliments would be sufficient to disconcert. any body, including the actor. Jerome Sykes, when with the Bostonians, was called upon for speech in Philadelphia under peculiar circumstances The finale of the last act of "Prince Ananias' found Sykes and Mcdonald sitting on a throne, Sykes smoking cigarette, robed in Roman toga of green with lavender drapery thrown over his shoulder and a papier mache crown on his head. Imag- inc the consternation of the comedian garbed thus to have an audience set up a cry for 8 speech. Sykes squirmed, while Mcdonald said, "Go ahead, ter ome; say something"
 Sykes ambled down to the footlights and said: Ladies and gentlemen, MT. Mcdonald, my compatriot who sits up there, informed me just minute ago that he had a neat little speech prepared that he'd like to have chance to try on the audience. hope you'll give him chance"
 Whereupon Mcdonald looked silly, and Sykes was never again prompted to Ego ahead and say something. "-Nev York Telegram.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
"I Feel Like a New Person."

Mrs. GEO. LEACH,
 1909 Belle St., Alton, H., writes:
 "Before began to take your Vege- table Compound l was a great sufferer from womb trouble. Menses would ap- pear two and three times in a month, causing me to be so weak could not stand. Icould neither sleepnor eat, and looked so badly my friends hardly knew me.
 -.oss doctor r4c-,,~ila but Ii- not derive much benefit from 1t. My drug gist gave me one of your little books, and after reading it ] decided to try Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Com pound. feel like a new person. l would not give your Compound for all the doctors medicine in the world. I can not praise it enough"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Extreme Caution.

''I caught myself just in time this morning." exclaimed Mir. Meekton. "I came very near annoying Henrietta quite severely"
 By some remark?"
 "No I started to whistle 'The Girl ] Left Behind Me, but stopped before she could recognize it.
 ''She dislikes the tune then?''
 ''I don't know that she disliIes the tune. But l am sure Henrietta would resent any insinuatiOn that the girl was not away in the lead, no matter what the occasion might be-
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
TRY ALIENS Foor-EAsE.

A powder to be shaken into the shoes. At this season your feet feel swollen, nervous and hot, and get tired easily. If you have smarting feet or tight shoes, try Aliens Foot-Ease. It cools the feet and makes walking easy. Cures swollen and sweating feet, blisters and callous spots, Relieves corns and bunions of all pain and gives rest and comfort. Ten thousand testimonials of cures. Try it today. Sold by ali Drug gists and shoe stores for 25c. Sent by mail
 for 25c in stamps. Trial package FREE. Address, Allen s. Olmstead, Le Roy, N. Y.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
.osr HIS LIFE SAVING OTHERS.

country boy visiting New York stopped a frantic runaway team that was about to dash on the sidewalk where there were hundreds of women and children. He saved their lives Dut lost ms owa. Hundreds of lives are saved every year by HOstetter's Stomach Bitters feopie who are fast going to their graves with disorders oi stomach, liver, bowels and blood are brought back to good health by it. All the sick should try it.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
DEAFNESS CANNOTBE CURED

By local applications as they cannot reach the diseased portion of the ear. There is only one way to cure deafness, and that is by cOnstitu- tional remedies. Deafness is caused by an in = famed condition of the mucous lining of the Eustachain Tube. When this tube gets infamed you have rumbling sound or imperfect hear ing, and when it is entirely closed deafness is the result, and unless the inflammation can be taken out and this tube restored to its normal condition, hearing will be destroyed forever; nine cases out of ten are caused by catarrh which is nothing but an inllamed condition of the mucous surfaces.
 We will give One Hundred Dollars for any case of deafness (caused by catarrh) that cannot be cured by Halls CatarTh Cure. Send for cir culars, free.
 F. J. CHENEY X CO, Props, Toledo, o Sold by Druggists. 75c.
 Halls Family Pills are the best.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Her Lucky Day.

A North Carolina paper says:
 "A negro struck his wife two terrible blows on the head with an ax The negro escaped to the woods, and his wife soon revived and said: I mighty glad he done it, kase now he'll stay cl 'ar CT de neighborhood en Iwon't have ter suppo't him no mo It wuz lucky day fer me wen he hit me wid dat axp 7"
 Very few of us are as thankful as that for these little blessings in disguise.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
REGAINED HEALTH.
Gratifying Letters to- Mrs. Pink
 ham From Happy Women.
VI Owe You My Life"
Mrs. E. WooLHIsER,
Mills, Neb., writes:

Mrs. E. WooLHIsER,
 Mills, Neb., writes:
 "DEAR MRS. PNKHAM:-I owe my life to your Vegetable Compound. The doctors said had consumption and nothing could be done for me. My menstruation had stopped and they said my blood was turning to water. l had several doctors. They all said I could not live. Ibegan the use of Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound, and it helped me right away; menses returned and have gained in weight. I have better health than have had for years. It is wonderful what your Com pound has done for me-
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
THE DANGER OF BEAUTY.

never read the papers without feeling e content That both my eyes are twisted find my nose is
 slightly bent I'm glad my mouth is out of line and that my teeth are few, And if had ''wealth of hair'' don't know
 what I'd do. "tiny foot" or lilly hand'' would fill me
 with dismay, And if had slender waist I'd eicken in a
 day, For have noticed from the first, as strange as
 it may seem, The girl wbo gets the worst of it is ''lovely
 as dream" The papers never tell about a woman being
 shot, Or mangled by a trolley car, or married to
 sot, Or forced at point of pistol her last fifty cents
 to lose, But that her eyes are ''limpid" and her boots
 are number twos. So can live in sweet content, without the
 slightest fear That trouble or calamity will evSr hover near, And when l see my nlisft face IL some relief
 to know That I'll outlive the beauties by hundred
 years or sol
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Diplomatic,

Henry" she said disconsolately, you didn't give me a birthday gift ''
 By love, that's so,'' said Henry, but you see you always look so young that can't realize you ever had birth days"
 Then she was happy, and he smiled the mean, subtle smile of a man who has saved money.-London Tit-Bits.'
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
ThoughtIess Girl.

Thoughtless Girl. "A most thoughtless girl" said her mother in accents of despair.
 What has she doneT asked her father.
 "She sat on the beach this morning so close to the water that the spray from breaker unexpectedly reached her," explained her mother.
 And took the curl all out of her hair, suppose" suggested her father. Worse than that" answered the mother. 'It ruined her bathing suit" Chicago Post.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Unsatisfactory Interview.

Good gracious, George, how you look! What did you say to papaT
 ''He didn't give me a chance to say anything" "Did you ask him for my hand"
 'T tell you he didn't give me a chance"
 What did he do"
 'He just enlisted me in the company he is getting up and told me to report for duty tomorrow morning" land Plain Dealer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
An UngratefuI Wretch.

Dear George: We are going to send you some canned stuff. What do you prefer"
 Dear Susie: Put whatever you please In half the cans. Fill the other half with whisky for antidOte. e."-CleVe- land Plain Dealer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

dancing ball. When winter is over we have the mOthball and now we have baseball, which will be with us until football comes again. ."-Pittsburg Chronicle-Telegraph.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
A Musical Festival.

'T want a big drum for my wife, a banjo for my daughter, an accordion for my little boy and a cornet for my self"
 Gracious! Are you all going on the stage"
 "No; we are fixing up an orchestra to discourage that man next door who plays the piano fifteen hours day. Detroit Free Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Why He Moved.

'Why has that blind beggar shifted his position, wonder? He stood at one place for nearly seven years until about week ago, when noticed that he had moved about half block down this way"
 'Yes, he had to do 1t. He couldn't read the war bulletins from where he stood before. e."-Cleveland Leader.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Hia Hone.

One day an Irishman was taking walk in small town near Glasgow when he met an old friend. After walk ing along the. road together, Pat friend said to him:
 Have you heard the latest newsT Pat-NO; what is it?
 There's a penny off the loaf"
 Pat-Bedad, and I hope 1t Is off tht penny ones.-Tit-Bits.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
HUMOR OF THE WEEK
STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN
 OF THE PRESS.

Odd, Curious and Laughab1e Phases of Human Nature Graphically For trayed by Eminent Word Artists or Our Own Day-A Budget of Fun.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Ancient Playing Cards.

The ancient Tarot packs were the ear Hest playing cards known. to our forefa- thers They consisted of 72, 77 or 76 cards These cards are still used in re mote parts of Italy, France and Switzer land and are made m Florence the de s.7-.@ -s--s -i-l down from genera tIon to generatinn.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

The Advertising of Schilling's Best in this paper met with such success that few months ago Messrs. A. SChilling & Co. started the advertising oftheir mOney-back baking powder. They are evidently we'll pleased with the results, for we have aga n recieved an order for advertising of their tea and baking powder-this time for in- creased space.
 There is nothing that sells so well as a good article advertised in the town where 1t is to be sold.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Little Night Shadow.

Jones-Funny about Deacon Pratt. Awfully absent-minded, you know.
 Brown-What's he been doing now?
 JOnes-At the prayer meeting last evening Elder Goode asked him to lead
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
All on Account OY the Deacon.

"There's another war on between Closer and Pinchem
 "No? Whats the matter this time?''
 "Of course you know they hate each other. Been rivals in business and so- ciety for years. Long ago both wanted to marry the same girl, and neither got her. Each blames the other for that. Mention Closer to Pinchem and he ----t- -~ G~l+ Mor+i0n Pinrharn to Closer anu laI swear m tue richest vocabulary 8 profane man ever accumu- lated.
 Deacon Worthy was the occasion of the most recent rupture. He was raising money for some good purpose and went to Closer, who headed the list with $500 under a positive agreement that $200 of the amount was to be immedi- ately handed back to him. When the deacon went to Pinchem, there were red splotches on the moon. He denouno- ed Closer as a miser and a shark. The idea of his having subscribed but $500 to such cause was d1sgraceful. Pinch em put down $500 and generously told the deacon to call on him if more were needed.
 "When Closer saw the list again, he was tickled into coughing fit and had word conveyed to Pinchem of his agree ment with the deacon. They thought for time that they d have to put Pinch em in straitjacket. The names he called Closer would keep a stenographer busy for week. They reached Closer, and now there is to be islander suit Each has vowed to whip the other on sight, and it is better than a circus to see how they dodge each other in their daily walks. The deacon only smiles while he deplores the fact that any had feeling was created.''
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Not a Hero.

Maria. is this red, white and blue ice-cream wholesome?"
 T don't know; but what if it isn't? Aren't you willing to take any risks for your country?
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
No Show.
walIace-I haven't noticed you dis

cIssing the war 8 bit Don't y0I take any interest In such things2
 Ferry-Oh, yes, but I've got such a weak voice that 1 stand no show in an Grgument.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Her Papa.

Her Papa. My papa's all dressed up to-day: He never looked so fine; I thought when 1 first looked at him My papa wasn't mine. He's got beautiful new suit The old one was so old It's blue, with buttons, oh, so bright l guess they must be gold. And papa's sort O glad and sort O sad-I wonder why; And ev'ry time she looks at him It makes my mamma cry. Who's Uncle Sam? My papa says That we belong to him; But papa's joking, cause he knows My uncle's name is Jim. My papa just belongs to me And mamma And guess The folks are blind who cannot see His buttons marked U. s. U. s. spells us. He's ours-and yet My mamma can't help cry, And papa tries to smile at me And can't-I wonder why? A single spade in the hand Is worth more than a tray of diamonds in the
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

Underground London contains 8, 900 miles ot sewers, 34,00O miles of tele graph wires, 4, 530 miles o1 water mains, 8, 900 miles of gas pipes, all def nitely fixed
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
A Compromise.

A missionary in British Guiana who has recorded some of his experiences in a book relates some curious instances of the choice of names by negro parents He was once asked to baptize a child "Seriatim ad Valorem," which would certainly have been distinctive "Whis- ky Emmanuel" may be quoted as Q tri umph of compromise - Westminstes GaZetta
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Tom-Fourth of July has such a de pressing effect on business

Miss }+lealar-1lr la.l#l Goesr' think so.
 Tom-What Is your fathers busi- ness?
 Miss Wheeler-Hes a doctor.-Cin- Cinnati Enquirer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
The Renuirements.

She-It requires money to get into society nowadays.
 He-Yes; and 1t requires brains to keep out of it.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
The Husbands View.

BachelOr-She dresses regardless of expense.
 Benedict (glOomily)-Did you ever see woman that didn'tANew York Jour- nal.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Al Curb to Superiority.

"My wife knows more about the geog- raphy of the war than I do."
 Doesn't that annoy you"
 ''NO; when she gets to showing off l correct her pronunciation of Spanish words"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

in prayer, and before he knew what he was saying the deacon replied: Tt isn't my lead. dealt 'em." It was evident that his mind was still on the little game he had the night before.-Boston Transcript.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

Piso's Cure for Consumption is the best of all cough cures.-George w. Lotz, Fa- bucher, La, August %, 1895.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

EITC Permanently Cured. No It's or nervous iIiS ness after first days use of Dr. Kline's Great Nerve Restorer, Send for FREE $2 .OO trial bottle and treatise. DR. R. II. KLINE, Ltd. s30 Arch St., Philadelphia. Pa.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

According to correspondent at Pla- centia, the chickens in that vicinity have been suddenly taken with a strange mania for ripe fruit and are at- tacking the orchards, where they fly into the trees, causing great loss to the fruit growers. Tn connection with the matter, it is said that the chickens were first taught the trick of flying in to the trees for the fruit by the birds which would drop pieces of fruit to the ground, thereby attracting the atten- uon Of the domestic fowls. Placentia chickens are now considered highfyers of the first grade.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
A Merry Round.

'It Is a trifie odd how balls mark out the circling year," remarked Mir. Man chester.
 What do you mean" asked MT. Bir- mingham.
 "Well, suppose we begin with au- tumn. We then have football. Ut is followed by snowfall. Then comes the
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
SociefH Nerve.

ITS Juppers cOurageOusT
 ''Wen, he is brave enough to wear red, white and blue golf stockings"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
We'll Mated.

We never have any trouble enter talnlng aunt Mary and aunt Eliza when they visit us.''
 ''Why not?
 They entertain each other bragging about their diseases"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

Miss Long (scornfully)-DO you call that serious, MT. Short? Why, don't think l ever heard anything so ridicu. lOuS.-Detroit Free Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

What did he die of, papa"
 "An eruption, dear."-Facts.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
A Fatal AftaCL.

'What's that book you're reading, papa"
 ''The Last Days of Pompeii,' my
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

In general the eggs or an insect are destined to be matched long after the parents are dead, so that most insects are born orphans Probably it is this that makes insects behave so horribly
 Mixed Party.
 ''I understand that was rather a mixed crowd that attended your benefit ball, Rastus.
 'Yassir, dey mixed once or twice, but we got 'em scatterated befo' any one had time to call fer de wagon. Gin cinnati Enquirer
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Economy of Goodness.

'T know why Boston girls have so much money to buy books" "WhyT
 "They never wilt their collars"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
Counarisons Are Odious.

Comparisons Are Odious. "She hurt my feelings dreadfully." "What did she say" "That I wasn't as good company as her dog"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

A single spade in the hand Is worth more than a tray of diamonds in the pack.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

Try schiIllng's Best tea and baking powder
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

1EUW lIg AlUOAEW WE IEs Mir. Short-My dear Miss Kate. have a very serious question wish to ask you.
 Miss Long-What is 1t. pray2
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03
What Impressed Her.

He-What was the first thing that i'm pressed you about me, darling?
 She-Why, Jack, 1t was your arm, don't you remember? I had only known you about an hour.-EXchange
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

her dog" l"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-09-03

tlon to gcneration
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1898-07-01
"IEIsRLES II STANLEY.

WI pract,cc il the Courts of Prince Georges ami
adjoining counties am, the Court II Appeals.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1898-07-01
EVELYN CAR E.
HELPING ABOUT TIE HOJSE.

The helpfulness of a good man:
when it comes to assistance in domes-
tic affairs, is apt to be very much like
that of the Mr.. Baker, says the Youth S
'.Companion,' whose exploit is narrat-
ell below:
His wife had asked him to hang a
picture she had purchased for the
par,or and he had said he could DO it
sin a iiff'y."
''You just get me the cord and a
picture hook" he said to his wife,
''and tell the servant girl to run down
in the cellar and bring up the step
ladder, and carry it into the parlor,
and where's those two little screw
thing-a-ma-iigs that 90 into the back
Of the frame at the sides to put the
cord through: Look them up for me:
and III need the gimlet TO bore little
holes for the screws. Somebody get
the gimlet, or may be | can drive them
in. with the hammer. johnny, ven
run down cellar and get the ham
mer."
81 don't known but a chair viii Ee
better than the stepladder for me tc
stand on. Somebody go out into the
kitchen and get me a chair. l don
want to stand on one of the parlor
chairs.
"Got the cord. Just measure off
about the right length and fasten it
in those little things at the side.
- here, now, there's your picture
all hung up in good shape, and no fuss
about it. The difference between us
men and You women is that when We
have anything TO do We go right ahead
and DO it and make no talk about
if
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1898-07-01
Diseases Of the Blood and Nerves.

Diseases of the Blood and Nerves.
No one need suffer with neuralgia. This
disease is quickly and permanently cured
by Browns Iron Btters. Every disease of
the blood, nerves and stomach, chronic
or otherwise, succumbs to Browns Iron
Bitters. Known and used for nearly n
quarter of century, it stands to-day fore
most among our most valued remedies.
Browns Iron Bitters is sold by all dealers.
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1898-07-01
Q n . To7IA.
E Bsas, the ~ The I!11 You Have AWAY:
Signature sf &HzNzzNx

Statistics show that in Antwerp
alone nearly 10000, horses were slaugh
tered last year for human consumption
and the numbers Of shops dealing
exclusively in horseflesh in the Bel
gian ports exceeds 30
The Prince George's enquirer and southern Maryland advertiser. (Upper Marlborough, Md.) 1882-1925, 1898-07-01
CASTORIA
For Infants and Children.
The Kind You Have Always Bought
1 1sass the Of GeHHZ2zzZ~

Judge Ermston tells Il good story
about a man he was questioning as to
his being good to so on Il $500.
"What property have YOU TO the
amount Of 5000 asked the judge.
Il have $500 in a building ass ca
ton replied the witness.
"Well, and what more:'
Il have stock in trade to tie amount
Of $500"
$50 on
Il have household furniture worth
500"
"WelI, we still want So"
Il have your note, judge, for that
amount, which you gave me seven
years ago at College Corner
Tableau,