Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1898-10-26
dt'ausiae Gatherings.

| when you don't compare well.
H@ An ocean racer burns about $l3,-
900 worth of coal every trip.
s4- There are estimated to be 2,754
languages and dialects spoken.
g0- Condors have been killed in Peru
with wings of 40 feet spread.
sd~ This country has more than g.
1000 men fit for military duty.
sd Many a woman who cannot drive
nail or horse, can drive man.
sT- The United States still have q
S35, ,757 square miles of public land.
p@ IF you cannot win mankind's ap'
probation be satisfied with your own.
eE An Indian smokes pipe of peace
and an Irishman smokes a piece OF
pipe.
sd- Not many tears are shed when
the man dies who has lived only for
| himself.
sS- There are great many things
the devil cannot do without the help
of hypocrite.
gar The pulsation of an infant is
from 13O to 40 beats minute; of an
old man, rs or 80.
s6s- The highest church steeple in
the world is that of the Cathedral OF
Antwerp, 476 feet.
saE The mos; difficult ups and downs
of this life are keeping expenses down
and appearances up.
s9 Love in a cottage is all right if
YOU have mansion to 60 TO after the
cottage affair plays out.
aS1H 1t is difficult for woman to
keep a secret; and know more than
one man who is woman.
s6 An old business sign in Phlla-
delphia, many years ago, read: "Wlll'
lam Shot and Jonathan Fell"
pIg- About one-half the population OF
Mexico are full blooded Indians, and
of these one-half are uncivilized.
sS- The largest theater in the world
is the Paris opera house. 1t covers
three acres and cost 100, 100000 francs.
p9- The best government is not that
which renders man the happlest, but
that which renders the greatest num-
ber happy.
tag If you lose your soul it will not
be because there are hypocrites in the
church, but because there is sin in your
own heart.
R6@ 1t is mans character, and not
his political or religious opinion, that
gives him a standing among good men
in all communities.
p9@ The latest wrinkle for weddings
is the substitution of rose leaves for
the time-honored rice thrown after the
newly married pair.
p9- Sir Arthur Sullivan is said to
have struck million notes on piano
in eight hours. The performance was
the result of challenge.
p@ Mrs. Slocum Ito her husbands
chum) Tom, wish you'd break Jim
of playing poker. The Chum-I did
break him only last night.
p6- Some people think that black is
the color of heaven. and that the more
thew can make their faces look like
midnight, the holier they are.
p6- Wise men are instructed by rea-
son men of less understanding by ex-
perience; the most ignorant by neces-
sity and the beast by nature.
s6- Norway is the only country in
the world which is not increasing its
annual yeald of cereals. The reason
is found in climatic conditions.
s9@ "How came you here ?" said the
visitor to prisoner in the penitentiary.
81 was bought here by my convic-
tions," was the firmly spoken reply.
sar 1t has been truly said that most
of us eat too much and sleep TO little
we read too much and think too little /;
we work too much and enjoy too little.
aaF She-You're awfully young to
be called colonel. He-Well, I've
been in IS engagements, and the girls
and I fought like the deuce in every
one.
s9- Mother - Willie, dear, what
would YOU like best for your birthday
Willie-Oh, mamma, 1 should like a
telephone next to my pillow, so that
might 90 to school in bed"
a6y Mrs. Brown-I am the mother OF
seven boys. Do you wonder thai l
am breadmaker? Mrs. Jones-I am
the mother of seven girls. Do you
wonder that l am matchmaker.
s@ "Don't be afraid of the bacon,
Mr.. Jenkins" said a clearinghouse
mistress TO boarder. "Not at all ,
madam. I've seen a piece twice as
large, and 1t did not scare me Bit"
s9~ 1t is better to begin life on Indian
meal pudding and salt Goldfish and rise
to roast beef and mince pie, than to
begin on roast beef and mince pie and
get down to Indian meal pudding and
Goldfish.
S9 "Oh, oh ~ exclaimed Mrs. B.,
crazed with toothache, "why can't peo-
pie be born without teeth ?" If you
will recollect a moment, my dear" )"
replied Mr.. B., "you will be convinced
that such is the fact"
B6~ Father-But you have no means
and no prospects. If give my daugh,
ter to you, what is TO become of her
Suitor- Well, sir, you are wealthy
man, and you are surely not going to
see your daughter starve.
s9- A horseback ride to Texas in five
| ,nnnthc and q ride ha ck hN rail in less