The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1898-12-22

that was practiced by the Master now
i soon 1900 years agone, but which has
God better-in the meantime fallen
somewhat into desuetude.
xxx
Mr.. Jos. MCGEE of Ypsilanti, Mich,
aged 10 has taken out license to
marry budding slip of 80 summers
All McGees, however, do not attain
such great age. Some meet with acct
dents.
| Xxx
The fellow who keeps on hOllering
"silver is dead,' reminds me of the
small boy who whistles when it's dark.
Xxx
AS Spain reads the lists of assets and
liabilities of the gentlemen who are
getting financially rehabilitated by
means of our new bankruptcy law, she
no doubt wishes that she were in g.
position to take advantage of it.
Xxx
The Rev. Samuel COlcOrd is on the
trail of Bob IngersoIl. Lots of people
think that the devil is also on his trail.
Thus it will be seen that Rev. Samuel
has company.
! Xxx
The Salvation Army in San Francisco
got up a glOve-contest in which the
contestants represented Light anG
Darkness. Those who placed their
| no rl> lo;,
show OF foundation, that they were
given the double. cross.
| ~
Pro Bono Publico-Your article OF
"America's Vampirial Policy" is re-
fused with regrets.
| m#m
A girl in Maine who was curling the
lilax on the back of her neck dropped
the hot curling iron down her back.
But then she didn't need it any more,
as her remarks made her hair curl.
The fellows who had fixed to steal
the streets of Chicago had to give UP
this time. But they will get them
|
to steal the river down there.
Xxx
"a dollar shaved is about ten cents
earned" said the coin sweater.
| Xxx
'SOme of the we'll meaning, but "a
ther innocent women of Chicagos
southside propose social ostricism for
Doodle aldermen"
| The above is one of Abbott Blunt's
paragraphs in the Minneapolis Times
Abbott is sometimes uncOnsciously
humorous. You will perhaps realize
that if you should attempt to figure
out to what extent "rather innocent
woman is off color.
~
The congressman are not likely to be
too inquisitive about Mr.. Roberts mat
rimonial relations, because you can
never tell whose madelinepollard will
be the next to raise row.
*.
Sir Christopher Sykes, the notice
clubman and friend of the Prince of
Wales, died the other day. There is a
suspicion in this Office that he was ar
ilIegitimate father or some other dist
ant relation of our Bill Sykes.
| #*#
A Western editor was running the
motto 1--WE tell the truth" at the head
of his paper. The other day, however,
he was compelled to encounter sever
al gentleman who objected to the truth
being told, and as a consequence the
motto disappeared and the following
notice was printed: "Until we recover
from the injuries recently received this
paper will lie just like the rest Of
them"
Out in Butte, Mont, they have been
digging holes in the ground until they
have got so close to hades that people
are dying from the fumes that arise.
1t is not unexpected. 1t has been sus-
pected right along that Butte was
either war or mighty near it.
Xxx
"This is sad story" said Belcher
about the ballet of an American opera
company being shipwrecked on one of
the cannibal islands,"
"Did the cannibalS eat them?" anx-
iously inquired Growler.
"No. They took few of them apart
and when they found that all the ten
derest parts were made of horsehair
and sawdust, they sent them to prison
| for IL ltoratinn of food cunnliac .