Martinsburg independent. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1875-1900, 1898-12-17
MRS. Bigbee's Tribulations.


Mebby you never heard Of Finni.-
0an's goot2 II ever you've been
out to Cars Cross Roads you must
have heard the critier mentioned;
but II you've never beon this way,
why, mebhy you don't know about
her. She belongs to Mrs. Finnigan,
and is OF the female sect, and they
keep her for to give milk for the
Finnioan twins. And before 1 git
through you'll understand that she
amt q goat to be sneezed at;
A spell ago, Sarah Jane she got
her young man. She's been try.
ing to fix one SOS he'd stay put
for quite a while--one that would
take her to parties and pay for ice
cream and sody. She hain't seemed
to have much luck that way, until
she went to visit her Aunt Isaac
Pitman, in Boston, and then she got
acquainted with Mr.. Clarence Eustis
Fitz-Jenkins.
Land sake When / was girl |
never had to look twice at teller.
I had all the beaus could attend TO
when agreed to take Abram Big
bee for better or worser. There
were three strings to my bow at that
very identical time, and sometimes
I've thought that took the very
weakest one of them all. But, law,
you can't begin to see ahead of you
as you can behint you. II my be-
hint sight had been as good as my
befront sight, mean TO say, that
if my befront sight hadn't been no
better than my behint sight-good
graciousl I'm all tangled up in my
interlects today
What I want to say is, that if |
could have looked into the future as
we'll as l can look into the past,
mebby 1 shouldn't have took Abram
Bigbee for better or worser, and
mebby l should. You can't always
tell what you would have done,
now, can you?
Sarah Jane was awful tickled to
think that she'd got young man at
last, and she wanted to invite him
right out to spend few days at our
farm. He's a skyropodist by trade.
A skyropodist, as mebby you know,
takes out corns and cuts your toe
nails for you at twenty five cents
apiece, and warrants not to hurt
you, and after a week Or two them
things that he took out will come
back again jest as pert and good as
new, and then he'll take them out
again on the same terms.
It's a sartain sure way to make
living, Sarah Jane says, because you
are always sure of crop, without
regard TO weather.
Abram and l we consented to have
him come out to our mouse, and
Sarah Jane she used up all the eggs
that Abraham full pedigreed hens
laid in three weeks, s-making cake
for him. She turned the house all
upside down, and hind part afore,
and trimmed all creation with ever
green, and sparrer grass, and spruce
boughs. 1 guess you never seed
such fuss made over one corn doc
tor afore.
had to put on my black ally
packer gownd, and Abram he put on
his new six dollar suit, marked down
from 25 dollars and warranted yard
wide, all wool, and fast dye, and
custom made. He hated awfully to
do it, for Abraham had about as
lives die as git off his old clothes;
but told him be could turn up his
panterloons when he MIXED, and put
some old stocking legs on over his
sleeves, and one of my bingham
aprons to keep the front of him
clean.
Beats everything how man does
hate to shift his clothes!
Sarah Jane she walked down to
the depot 10 meet him. She wanted
to take the old mare and the shay,
but Abram said the old mare had
showed some signs lately Of having
one of them balky spells of hern,
and he was afraid she might be took,
and they wouldn't git back to the
house in time for supper. That are
boss has some awful tantrums every
time she's been halnessed ever since
that are affair of Spiggott's and that
makes me think--Betsy B. amt
spoke to Spiggott since, and as for
Mrs. Grimsby, she packed up her
kit aud went off TO her sisters; and
Spiggot is doing his work hisself.
Mr.. Fitz.Jenkins come all right,
and he and Sarah Jane come up the
front walk arm in arm, as loving as
two little birds. He wasn't much of
anything to look at, but then you
can't always tell by a mans looks
how much he amounts to. He was
light-haired, and he had a little yell
Ter moustache that was the next
thing to invisible. But he kept
feeling of the place where it was ex.
pected to be all the time when he