The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1898-03-11

Some Amusing Tales OF lile&ibic
handwriting.
London Globe.


1t is the perversity of human nature
that people who ought 10 do one thing do
another. Men who write legiole hand
(no one can accomplish more tnan mat
now, Will use typewriter, ana DINERS,
who ought never to be trusted with
pen, order thsm by the gross. ana take tne
discount Rudyard kipiing writes neat.
delicate hand, and Conan Doyle's Is As
plain as the proverbial pikestan. but both
use machines. IL would have saved
deal of misery and helped to perpetua.e
a useful art If other writers OF eninence
could have been prevailed upon to type.
Unfortunately, the typewriter was too DE-
lated an invention to affect many or the
hest bal writer's. Carlyle would not have
struggled with a keyboard, but " would
have prevented that miserable compositor
fleeing from Edinburgh TO London out OF
his way II he had. Cariyles, however,
was copperplate to others that could be
mentioned. Hugo's manuscripts, we are
told. presented the appearance OF a sort
OF battlefield on paper. in which the killed
words were we'll stamped out and the new
recruits pushed forward In anything but
good order Napoleon was unique in ey-
erything even in his handwriting. His
letters from Germany TO Josephine were
at first taken for maps of the seat OF war.
And his signature was fndistingusha-
his hierogiyphie. Byron and Dean Stan
ley wrote atrocious fists" and IL is said
that Sidney Smiths was no better, al
though he used to chsH Jeffrey badly He
used to say that jeffrey read from left
10 right. and his Wife from right TO left.
but neither could maxi out syllable.
Jules Janin would rather rewrite than at
tempt 10 read over again what he had
written. and Montaigne could never read
what he had written. The acute thinker
mended matters by employing a secre-
tsry, whose writing was absolutely unde-
cipherable Bszac was big a sinner.
and Dickens microscopic characters. writ
ten on blue paper with blue ink. appalled,
many seasoned compositors A terriDle
hand had Henry Ward Beecher; his
daughter once declared that she had three
guiding rules IN copying tiff letter was
dotted IL was not an "a" and II IL was
crossed II was not a. 81" ana word with
capital letter did not begin a sentence.
Jacob Bryan said OF Arehdeacon Coxe's
caligraphy that IL could neither be called
a hand nor a fist bat a foot and that
. club one His hieroelyphics formed
clumsy tangled black skein that ran
across the paper In knots, which IL was
impossible TO unite into meaning. Lord
Eldon used TO tell OF John Bell. a great
chanecry lumlnaTy OF bis time. that he
rad three different methods Of putting his
wisdom on pap@r-~one intelAEibie 20 + m
read and ne could not. and the third which
neither he nor his clerk nor anyone else
could read. The funny letter OF r II.
Aldrch 10 Prof. Morse stands alongside
Of Tom Hoods <scetious reply 10 Lady
GeorginA Fuiiertons as protest against
learned eligibility. Alarich assorted sha.
he could iecipher nothing IN the profess
sor's missive but the date, which he
knew. and the signature which be
guessed H.
The story of the Duke Of Wellington
writing 20 Bishop Bloomfield when he nd
received a letter from J. c. Loudon. the
eminent landscape designer. asking 20 see
the Waterloo beeches a; St-afhfieIdsaye
fs chestnut. but II makes Us laugh Ia
though. perhaps We ought notl TO pic
ture the CONSERVATION % the bishop (sna
through him the shcck % the whole Epis-
copal bench. on receiving permission 10
view the dukes Waterloo breaches Also
classic ~ the tale Of Hscready's aGrnis-
sion ticket being solemnly made ur, by
the aDothecary tho a cough mixture TO
5e taken three times cay" The mama
81 Horace Greeley has. in this connection
20 be mentioned with chassened re~pecs
He, undoubtedly. was the great rrasss-
81 iiisgloihty. II was OF him the com
posftor averrea that II Refsfazxsr rad
seen hts handwriting on The wall he would
have had cause 30 be terrified A common
Story SU ia.:<e 20 Grseisy. bsAA -