Evening journal., 1898-04-22
THIS ALLIGATOR FAD.

THIS ALLIGATOR FAD.
when a man receives a young alliga-
as gife from friend he is swayed |
Z various emotions. At first he curses
q giver and decides to get rid of the
Then friends and neighbors tell ,
ID how nice it is to own an alligator,
he begins to appreciate the distinc-
"a. He has a p. T. Barnum feeling
wonders when the rest Of the me-
7yerie will be along. In his mind he
s bates whether it would not be move
6 the right direction to mortgage his
s Ongings and apply the money so de-
Z ed to the purchase of a babbling
s ok or a mill-pOnd. At last he com
mises the differences between his
rt and his judgment by putting a
= lar or two into a zinc-lined box COW
d with wire screen. He makes a
dwoOd Goat for the alligator to use
his sun-baths, and just when he has
or s. carefully invested for the al
atOr's benefit and comfort, It cries
Florida water and dies. The Way
'N er knows all about the bitter eX-
ience, and if any lover of young al
RtOrs wants to buy an alligator out
"a at a liberal discount, all he has to
81 is to. apply to the Wayfarer or to
renee Wood, of the Delaware Con
4lction Company, who had two deaths
81 his alligator family at Morrison's
Int in one day, and which proved
4 n a blow to Jimmy Devlin that he
been shedding crocodile tears ever
Zee. There are several other Will
hgtOn men who are acting as dry
..s F,rs al o11fUnfarsc and rnncf Of
m will be wearing Grape on their
s before many weeks roll by.
saloon keeper out on Maryland
nue. is another man who feels the
lgs Of grief. He has a friend in
rida, and, like all other friends who
in Florida or who go to Florida,
5 friend concluded that he was in
4 y bound to send on young alliga-
When it arrived the saloOn-keeper
Mt some money to entertain it in a
pitable manner. The cOlOred do
site, when she saw it, asked her en-
yer what it was, and received the
ly that it was an alligator
# Well, wots yO' a-gwine to do wild
navigator" asked the woman.
axe soup outten hit?"
E No, it's a pet,' answered the man,
pping a sigh at the altar of friend
b.
bne evening recently the saloon
per and some friends were playing
ocial game Of cards, when a racket
heard in the dining room.
Slip in there and see what's up"
1 the saloOn-keeper to one Of his
nds
Nothing but the dog and cat playing
s n a mouse" said the friend as he
irned and resumed his play
ne noise in the dining room cOntin-
and became so annoying that the
prietor left the card table to put a
p to it. There was a dogs yelp and
PATS meow, and the saloon-keeper
ne back carrying a young alligator.
lch was in the thrOes Of death.
laring at the man whom he had sent
to investigate he said
You've played the dickensl 1 have
opinion of a man who can't tell an
gator from a mouse"
The game broke up in confusion.
Rect IMPROVEMENTS INHADES
made up my mind to quit smoking
evening" remarked a young man
the Wayfarers acquaintance to a
end.
How did you make out?" was the in
ry.
I swore off at II O'clock" he said
passed the night pretty well. At &
lock next morning I smoked two
PES before I got out of bed. Then
breakfast. Before I left home for
Office I smoked another pipe. After
cached the office I hit it three times
the way up town l smoked two Gig
Rttes and a cigar. l have come to the
nclusiOn that I must taper off.
. Yes, | should imagine so" said hi.
end Here. have a fresh cigar"
Thanks, old man." answered the
low who had wearied of the tobacco
bit" Let me have a light, please.
hell is paved with good resolu
MS this fellow is responsible TO
improved condition of about tw,
iares and a-haf of streets.
OFFICER SMITHS MISTAKE.
Special Officer Smith, whose beat i
mined to the premises of the P, W
Is. railroad station, is one Of tn
81 conservatOrs of the peace in tn
lploy OF the railroad company. II
es not make himself obiectionabl
those who have business at the sta
1n, and in the several years that tn
ayfarer has known him and see
M on duty he has never noticed an
clination on the part of Office
lith to be officiOus. On the contrar,
is always polite and obliging I
Rll-disposed persons, but a terror {
il-dOers.
No matter how efficient or how care
an officer may endeavor to be. the1
c times when he makes egregiou
unders It is related of Officer Smit
at he recently arrested a man an
ok him up to the City Hall. III
buse sergeant wanted to know the n;
re and scope of the charge.
Loud. obscene and abusive talk
nicer Smith is credited with repl,
q.
Whats your name?" asked IL
buse sergeant, turning to the prisone
no returned a stolid stare.
"I say, what's your name!" eXclain
the house sergeant. nettled by Il
ans apparent inattentiOn.
Still there was no reply. Final
e prisoner became aware that he VI
sing addressed. He raised his han
nd began talking to the sergeant
M cans OF deaf-and-dumb signs.