The herald., 1898-08-01
|, Mr.. DOoIey on Our Cuban Allies

"Well, SIR" said Mr.. Dooley, dam thin
Cubians. If was Ginral Shafter I'd back
up tn wagon In frunt iv tn dure an I'd say
to Gin'ral Garshay. I'd say, Il want you.
an I'd have thin all down at TIL station an
cacIntly booked be tn deck sergeant befure
tn faEtv night TIL impydinoe iv thim!"
"What have they been doin'?" Mr.. Hen
messy asked.
Failing to understand our civilization"
said Mr.. Dooley "Ye see it was this way.
This is tn way 1t was. Gn'ral Garshay with
wan hundred thousan mems been fight
in bravely f'r two years FIR to liberyate
Cuba. FIR two years he has been marchin'
his sivtnty-five thousan' men up an down
tn island destroyin 'th' naughty Spanyard
be tn millyons. Whin war was declared he
offered his own sarvice an TIL sarvices iv his
ARMY iv fifty thousan' mem to tn United
States, an while waitin' FIR ships to arrive
he marched at tn head iv his ten thousan'
men down to Sandago de Cuba an captured
cigar facthry which they soon rayjooced
TO smokin' ruins. They was holdin' this po-
sition-Ginral Garshay an his gallant one
thousan' men-whin Gin'ral Shafter arrived.
Gin'ral Garshay immejitly offered TIL sar-
vices iv himself an his two hundred men FIR
TIL capture iv Sandago, an whin Ginral
Shafter arrived, there was Gin'ral Garshay
with his gallant band iv fifty Cubians ready
to ate at a miniyits notice.
"Gin'ral Shafter is a big, coorse, o-fisted
man firm Michigan, an whin he sees Gin'ral
Garshay an his twinty-fife gallant followers.
'Fr-ront.' says he This way he says, step
| lively, he says, an move some v these
things. he says. Sir says Gin'ral Garshay,
dye take me fr a dhray?' he says. I'm q
sojer,' he says not q baggage car he says,
I'm a Cubian pathriot an I'd lay down me
life an the lives tv tv'ry wan " tn eighteen
brave men fv me devoted ARMY, he says
but III be damned II l carry thrunk he
says, an they ain't wan iv these twelve men
here that wuddent follow me to hell if they
was awake at th' time he says. but he
says, II twas wurruk we were lookin' f'r,
we cud have found it long ago. he says
'They'se lot fv 1t In this country that no.
body's ustn'.' he says. What we want he
says is freedom he says. an If ye think
we have been In th' woods dodgin' th' saw
age correspondent f'r two year he says 'f'r
tn sake iv rushin' ye'er laundry home
he says, It's no wondher,' he says, that tn
r-roads firm Marlnette to Kalamazoo Is
paved with gould bricks bought be tn people
" ye'er native state he gays.
80 Shafter had to carry his own thr1lnk.
an well 1t was FIR him that 1t wasn't Gin raj
Miles. tn weather bein' hot An Shafter
was mad clear through, an whin he took
hold iv Sandago an was sendin' out inyi-
tations he scratched Garshy. Gnrshy
took his gallant band iv six back to IN
woods, and there tn three " thin ar-re
now. ARMED with forty r-rounds iv canned
lobster an r-ready to raysist to tn death.
Him an tn other man has written to
Gin'ral Shafter to tell him what they
think iv him. an 1t don't take long"
"Well." said Mr.. Hennessy. II think
Shafter done wrong. He might We asked
Garshy in f'r to Sc TIL show, seem tina,
he's been hangin ar-round FIR long time,
doin' tn best he cud."
'It isn't that" explained Mr.. Dooley
9TH throuble is tn Cubians don't under
sthand our civilization. over here free
dom means hard wurruk. What Is tn am
bition iv all iv us. Hinnissy? 'Tls ayether
to hold our job or to get wan. We want
wurruk We must have it. Dye ray
mimber TIL sign tn mob carried in TIL pro-
cession las year: Give us work or we
perish, 1t said They had their heads bate
pist'd come along an make thin shovel
coal. Now, in Cuba, whin tn mobs turns
out they carry banner with tn wurruds
"Give us nawthin' to do or we perish
Whn a Cuban comes home at night with
a happy smile on his face he don't say to
his wife an chtlder: Thank Gawd, I've got
wurruk at last He says: Thank Gawd,
I've been fred. An tn childher 20 out
an they say: 'Pah-pah has lost his lob
an Mrs. Cuban buys herself new bonnet
an where wanst they was sorry an de-
spalr all Is happiness an a cottage organ
"Ye can't make people here underestimate
that an we can't make a Cuban under
sthand that freedom means tn same thing
as pinitinchry sintince. When we thry
10 get him to wurruk he'll say: why
shud I? haven't committed any crime
That's goin to be the throuble Th' first
thing we know We'll have another war in
Cuba whin we begin disthributin' good
Jobs, twelve hours a day, wan sivinty-flfe.
Th' Cubians amt civilized in our way.
sometimes think I've got a touch " Cuban
blood in me own veins. ."-Chicago Journal