The record-union., 1898-10-17
sIsTERLY SYMPATHY.
Planned to Fool His Wife, but the
Scheme Was Frustrated.

Gardiner wishes he had left well
enough alone. He realizes all too late
that a social reformer must not act
hastily. Up to a week ago there was
no cloud on his domestic horizon.
Sometimes he did wish that Mrs. Gar
diner was not so successful in combin-
ing ardent attention to church duties
with an expensive taste in dress, but,
after all, these are venial faults Then
his evil fate threw him in with Dicken-
son.
The GARDENERS only recently moved
into Hyde Park. The Dickensons were
about their first friends there. One
evening Dickinson descanted on the
times they had been having with what
he called talking board" which, ac-
cording to him, was a board with The
letters of the alphabet on it, and which,
in conjunction with a small, heart
shaped piece Of wood mounted on three
legs, was supposed to spell out mes
sages from Julius Caesar and other de-
parted celebrities, the operators fingers
resting lightly on the small piece.
Tell you what" said Gardiner, lets
put up a job on my wife. Some even
ing when we come around you put your
wife up TO it and let this board get off
some message from Mrs. GARDENERS S
grandmother, Eliza Harrington; don't
forget the name.
What sort of messages?" asked
Dickinson.
oh" said Gardiner, tell her that her
grandmother is quite panied by her
extravaganza. See! Then stick in some
thing about church duties being all
right, but point out that men who work
hard all week should be allowed to sleep
late Sundays-you know the style of
thing"
Dickinson fell into the plot readily
enough, but when he broached the sub
ject to Mrs Dickinson she remarked,
apropos of nothing in particular:
You men are all alike
"Well, my DEAR" said Dickinson,
there's no harm in it,
mo, 1 suppose not" said Mrs. Dick
enson meditatively. We'll, I'll see
what l can do"
A few evenings afterward the Gardl-
ners dropped in and the talking board
was produced. Mrs. Dickinson. With
one hand resting on the indicator, pre-
pared for converse with the spooks.
To the initial question, rs there any
spirit who wishes to talk to anyone
here?" the board answered Yes"
ITO whom does the spirit wish to
speak?" solennly demanded Mrs. Dick
enson, and the board promptly spelled
out Amelia Gardiner
"Oh, William" said Mrs. Gardiner,
clutching her husband, did you see
that?" William, striving to suppress
grin, said he did.
What is the spirits name?' inquired
Mrs. Dickinson, and the board spelled
out ELIZA Harrington" while Gardi-
ner winked at Dickinson in an excess of
enjoyment.
Did you know any one of that
name?" asked Mrs. Dickinson, turning
to Mrs. Gardiner
"Why. yes" answered Mrs. Gardiner;
'its Grandmamma Harrington. Please
Mrs. Dickinson, ask her what she wants
to say to me-
Under Mrs Dickenson's careful tutor
ship the board spelled out, Il am trou-
bled in my mind about William.
How grandmamma?" asked Mrs
Gardiner, and the board rejoined, he
smokes too much"
There, now, William, I'm always
telling you that" broke in Mrs. Gardl-
ner. while the board continued until II
had spelled out, And he doesn't go to
church often enough
See here" said William, this is
but his wife stopped him with:
William, how can you interrupt such
a message? Do hold your tongue II you
have any proper feeling at all. What
shall I do, grandmamma? What shall
I do?" and the board responded:
"Wrestle with him in the spirit, my
child"
'I will, grandmamma, I WILL cr1ed
Mrs. Gardiner, fervently, and at THIS
point Dickinson found GARDENERS race
too much for him and retired abruptly
to the hall, while Mrs. Dickinson, see
ing that Mrs. Gardiner was becoming
hvsterical answered that the spirit had
departed.
Gardeners leave-taking was marked
by an arctic frigidity, but last Sunday
evening he came to Dickinson an abb
ject suitor.
For heavens sake" he said, take
the curse off me. 1 haven't had a cigar
for four days and I've been to church
twice to-day. Man alive! she woke me
up at o'clock this morning to wres-
tie with me in the spirit"
Dickinson only chuckled and re-
ferred him to Mrs. Dickenson--Chi-
cago Times-Herald.
GATES AND THE REDSKINS.