The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1898-07-01
THE FRENCHMAN AT LARGE.
He's a Pretty COmical Parsonage,
But He Cant Help 1t.

ly down on the Englishmen, the cheap
Jokes and caricatures at whose expense are
the making indeed of the boulevard
comic" weeklies. It is just possible that
we may look a little out of our element in
the land which is a dangerous place Of
residence for snalls, but the Frenchman is
under a deluson if he imagines that he Is
other than a laughable object in London.
As a matter of fact, he is excellent sport
dong before he gets there. Have you ever
watched him start on his journey from the
Care Du NOrd OF the Care 81. LaZare, in
his own capital? If he was bound for the
pole in "a balloon he could not make
greater bother. The bulk of his family
has gathered TO see MIN off, and he struts
and fuses about the platform, convinced
that he has a good deal in common with
your Stanleys and Livingstones. He Is
travelling to a far country, he is leaving
civilization behind him, he is a daredevil
fellow and he knows it. His family knows
il, too and pats him on the back in proper
pride.
Then the moment of parting comes, and
he disappears from sight amid Volley or
kisses and a shower of tears. Until the
train is about a mile out of the station he
waves his handkerchief out of the window,
after which he consents to take his seat.
and at once he sets to work to eat the con-
tents of a score Of paper packages, pos
sessed as he is of a deeply rooted belief
that the true long-distance traveller Is
called upon by the rules OF the game to
make a meal in the railway carriage.
The fate of the meal is usually unhap-
py for there is that pesilent channel 10
be negotiated, and Frenchman are eXtraV-
agantly prone to suffer from NAL de mer,
Moreover, of all the lamentable sights to
be met with in this vale Of tears there is
none that comes up to a seasick French
man. Doubtless nobody presents brave
appearance when prey TO this abOmina-
bic affection, but the fathomless woe of the
Frenchman is the very acme of anguish.
The poor stricken soul attains to the eX-
IRENE limits of human misery. The
spruce, sprghtly, laxative creature who
on terra firma was overwhelmed with
the proud consciousness of his claims to
the title OF globe trotter, has become a
agonized oountenance would read the heart
agonized countenance would red the heart
Of a Chinese executioner. He is the liV
ing embodiment of abject hopelessness. a
crushed, wailing thing unutterabiy for
lorn.
However, he revives, and in a longer or
shorter time is again in the best of spirits
Once more he is a credit to his clothes.
For at bottom the only reason which in
duces a trenchman to travel Is the joy he
experiences in airing, in the course of his
peregrnatious what he considers an ap-
propriate costume. Be it said I'm passing
that it Is precisely similar motive thar
has induced him TO take to bicycling; he
would never have risked himself on a ma
chine if it had not been for the glory of
knlckerbockeTs and their appurtenances.
Similarly he travels very largely for the
sake of what he calls his ''complet"-that
is, of his complete suit of the same ma
terial, for to travel except in a 'complet"
would be as inglorious in his eyes as to
admit that he could exchange half a doz-
en- sentences with a lady without her fall
ing in love with him. Then there is the
French hat of travel The ideal article Is
in soft felt. preferably gray or perhaps a
lovely brown, a style that may be worn
with very jaunty and adventurous cock"
But there are possibilities as well in the
straw, since the makers of French straw
hats are imaginative, and have muti-col-
ored monstorstes in stock for the men
who, having the courage to travel have
naturally the courage to wear them The
Frenchman too, may be known by his
boots; NOT merely by their pattern, which
is peculiar British notions go. but by
the fact that they are always too small
for him. 1t is tight boots that explain
why il is that Frenchmen do not walk
but hop around, like so many birds, the
resemblance being completed by their
fowl-like manner of chirping and chatter
| ing The hat and the "complet" go a long
way toward making the French tourist
but he loves to complete his equipment
by swinging a bag about his person by
means of a strap. If he be a bachelor,
the bag probably contains nothing at all,
unless il be a stale sandwich; but if he is
married, il secretes a powder puff and his
wifes handkerchief.
The grand chic" is TO complete this
accoutrement by an opera glass dangling
on ha spuff 81 10 10 he Naar xr~,s d,
superb finishing touch is furnished by a
Photographic apparatus. The little man
would ada a knapsack If 1t were not for
certain uncomfortable "reminiscences of his
military service.
Thus arrayed the Frenchman fits from
Westminster Abbey TO the Empire, from
the Tower of London to the cafes in and
about Regent street In really what he ad-
mires most is the big city policeman Of
ten enough in summer time you may see
him rooted to the pavement sizing up in a
fascinated stare the colossal gentlemen in
blue who stand outside the Mansion
House. After he has thoroughly taken in
their proportions, he approaches one of
the giants, bows. takes off his hat and at
tempts TO ask the way, not so much for
the sake of the information, as he is prob
ably quite incapable of understanding the
answer but for the personal satisfaction
of having conversed, even momentarily
with iileal OeSCSnQunt OF LOG or Ma
cog.
He has other joys, and one of the great
est of them Is the hanson cab. You DO not
know what il is 10 look happy if you have
not seen a Frenchman, fresh to the eXpe-
rience. hall hanson and get into it, after
spending a minute or two striking gym
nastic attitudes on the step The very
small boy taking one of his first rides in a
train is not half so elated. On the other
hand, the omnibuses perpleX him. Ac-
cusromed IN his own capital 20 pay the
same fare whatever the distance he sus.
poets the conductor of trying to take adj
vantage of him. He is given in consequence
TO making scenes ana 90 losing his temper
He also hoses his way
Doubtless other strangers lose their way
bat the Frenchman - perpetually in this
predicament, owing to his invariable igno-
rance Of The language and to his haram-
scarum fashion Of darling round without
paying the least attention to where he is
going.
lie feels that England has no secrets for
him, and he says as much to whoever will
listen to him. He knows as much about
ssIl.4ta bJgeleC'f n 10 does ahout Tho hon