The record-union., 1898-07-03
FRIENDSHIPS OF WOMEN.
Claimed that Some Will Last as
Long as Life.

| Especial Correspondence Record-Union)
PORTLAND orr, June 2S.-I was
reading not long ago an article in
certain well-known magazine on the
friendships of women, which set me to
thinking There are some people who
do not believe that friendship can ex-
list between women, but that it can
and does proves the fallacy of this be-
| lief. Some of the sweetest and trCest
friendships have in the past existed
between women, but the woman who
maintains and keeps up an ideal friend
ship of this kind must be a woman
of brain; a woman who thinks of high
er things than dress and frivolity; not
that these are not very good things IN
their way, but if allowed to become par
amount factors in a woman's life they
will make her in time petty, narrow
and exacting.
Friendship, in my eyes, should be
game of give and take. To accept all
and yet, when the time comes, be un-
able or unwilling to give at least As
much as has been given, is a very poor
sort of friendship; indeed that is a
friendship unworthy of the name.
There are two kinds Of friendships.
The first is the sickly sentimentality Of
one to love; she is fairly yearning Cor
some one upon whom she can bestow
her surplus affection. Sometimes she
chooses a woman of sense and discre-
ton: woman some years older than
herself, who can give her advice and
assistance which will be of use to her
in her future career. So much the bet
ter; but, unfortunately, this is not al
ways the case Her alteration, for that
is what it usually amounts to- is pinned
on some girl friend. They dear" and
honey and darling" each other until
it becomes simply wearisome to hear
them They dress alike SO far as pos
| sibIe. and are together morning, noon
| and night. In the course Of time the
| inevitable result is sure to follow; they
| quarrel fiercely over some trif1e, and
| hate each other ever afterwards. When
| it is over they try to look cynical and
talk of the insincerity Of their sex. OF
course it's silly, but the comfort of 1t
| lies in the fact that they are bound to
| get over it in time. Personally, don't
| believe such experiences help any girl.
They have a tendency to sow in her
heart the seeds Of doubt and mistrust,
and it would not be beneficial to either
her health or morals to have her faith
in humanity shattered too many times.
Such experiences are bound to come to
her sooner or later as she mingles more
freely in the world of men and women.
1t is the duty of every mother to know
and approve of her daughters intimate
| friends If she is careful Of this when
this same daughter grows to woman
hood and reaches an age when she is
able to pick and choose for herself, she
| will be less liable to mistakes and con-
seqIent heartaches.
The other friendship is the friendship
which comes in later years. 1t is more
enduring, because tempered with the
winds of experience. It Is less gush-
| ing and demonstrative than the girlish
| friendships, but has an air Of quiet
dignity and truth This is the friend
ship which will last through time and
through eternity. The ideal friendship
is not exacting; is merciful in it's for
giveness. and above all else is sincere
Sincerity and truth are the ground
| work of all true pure friendships. To
have the happy faculty of making peo-
pie love you; to be above all mean and
petty spites and jealousies is one Of
| the secrets of the true noble friend
ships which have existed between wo-
men and which will exist until the end
of time. BESELENA.