The Kootenai herald. [volume] (Kootenai, Idaho) 1891-1904, 1898-06-11
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Not SO Remarkabe.-De Sappie-I
believe my dog knows as much as l
DO She-rve seen smarter dogs than
that.-Puck.
Fair Nisitor-What a lovely parrot!
ITO parrot)-Polly want a cracker? Pol
ly (cautiously)-Did you make it your
sef?-Truth.
The Rule-The Able Editor 0ronical-
ly)-Is this poetry? Contributor-Didn't
| begin each line with capital letter?
Boston Traveller.
Little Clarence-Pa, what is the diff
ference between firmness and obstin-
acy? Mr.. Callipers-Merely a matter
Of sex, my son.-Puck.
George, father has failed" That's
Just like him! l told you all along,
darling, that he was going to do all he
could to keep us from marrying. Tit
Bits.
He DECENTRALIZATION have refused
me! Tomorrow l go to seek my for
tune in the Klondlke. She-May l have
the refusal of you when you return?-
Puck.
"Are you the boss of the house?" in
CURED the man at the door mo; I'm
only the boss understudy," was the
much-married mans Observation-Disclosures
Statesman.
Nariable.-Stranger lin TeXas)-How
long do you fellows work at a stretch?
Cowboy-Well. 1t depends a good deal
on how easy de Teller dies. Dey're
varlable.7Judge.
"They say poor Clara consulted the
stars before marrying him." "Ani
what was the resultY' "They all gave
him "A good character, except one
vaudeville star."-Life.
General Recruit surveying the ball
room)-I think your ladies would make
excellent soldiers. Van Teel-Why so?
General Recruit-They display so much
INSTRUMENTATION Life.
Doctor, who was that man that
screeched and yowled so loud when
you were pulling his tooth?' "That
was a Christian Science friend of
mine. Chicago Tribune.
Laura-When Bob proposed last
night, did you know what was coming?
Lucretia-No; l didn't know papa was
within hearing; neither did Bob. Poor
Bob.-Yonkers Statesman.
Mrs. Booser Ito Mr.. B.)-Why, you
/, disgraceful creature, you're never so
Der! Mr.. Booser-No? Mus have been
, 'toxicated when married you, an not
'ponsible for actions. Fun.
Mistress (severely)-If such thing
= occurs again, Norah, 1 shall have to get
another servant. Norah-I wish yez
wud-there's easily enough worruk for
two av us.-Boston Traveller.
She-Here is such a pretty story in
the paper about how Edison came to
marry. Hell wish some of these bright
o journalists would explain how l came
, to marry. -Indianapolis Journal.
4 Mr.. Millyuns (briskly)-Want my
+ daughter, Ell? Well how much are you
=" worth? Money talks, you know Boil
e Hardup (cheerfully)-Yes. l know; bu
e I'd be willing to let her do most of tn,
It talking.-Punch.
3 Misunderstanding Character-Wot',
I Their time, guv'nor? Mr.. Bluff (hittinl
l. lim over the head)-Its just struck
one! Misunderstanding Characte
'groaningly)-I 'ope your watch ain
I. a repeater,-Tlt-Bits
A Misinterpretation.- Hair-cutter It,
= parent)-Shall l give your boy ban,
on his forehead, sir? Parent (busily)-
Yes; and If that doesn't quiet him, Civ,
\ aim one in the neck. He's been warne,
k not to hdget in the BARRIERS chair
Of Judge.
i ic Fuddy-Do you really think tina
lg Baskers cares much for his wife? bud
Id dy-Cares for her? He dotes on her
"a Scores of times I've known him to max
n faces for his wife when she had t
re take nasty-tasting medicine-Bos
he Transcript.
a, 81 observe in the public prints" sal
Sc the scientific bOarder, that a whale
n tongue sometimes yields a ton of oil.
~, If the whale is as oily-tongued a
x that" said the cheerful idiot, mo wor
is der Jonah was taken in."-IndianapC
Mt lis Journal.
,ir 80 don't worry about such trifies
ms said the New York girl. Just keep
stiff upper lip and you'll come out a
re right" But" replied her Bosto
&c cousin, sit is a physical mposslbilit
or for me to maintain superior labial ri
M idity.-Chicago News.
1y Still Has Faith.-"Mrs. Higgins
Ie- still wildly in love with her husband
va Nnoac Sba ,,trt tho huttone on h., Chi.