Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1898-03-22
HE NET HIS MATCH.
WHY BULLY eRoNsToN OF WYOMING
WILL NEVER BOX AGAIN.

WILL NEVER BOX AGAIN.
The Chsmpios Pusiiist of the Hunting
Grounds Had Downed Many Kinds of
High Omciaia. but Never Before Tsc-
killed. . Young Consul.
There was hardy fellow named
Bronston whe lived in shack on des-
ert claim just at the edge Of the Wyo-
ming hunting grounds who had q repu-
tation for being about as handy with
his fists a. the next conner. Bronston
had IN especial dislike for the dude"
hunters, and IL was his boast that in
fair encounter he could best anything
wearing good clothes and carrying 81
pounds Of varieRated ammunition. He
was kept fairly busy.
The hunting grounds, despite the
presence Of Bronston, became moro pop.
ular year after year. until finally he had
to be little more select in his opera.
tions, as there were altogether too many
visitors to allow him time to do the
whole lot justice. He finally announced
that in future he was going to whip no.
body under the rank Of colonel in mill
tary life and nobody who in civil life
wasn't at least mayor Of big town On
president Of railroad. BY following
this plan he succeeded In filling his time
comfortably without overworking him.
self He was uniformly successful until
one day party stopped ut his ranch
and introduced themselves as eastern
tourists bent on doing some elk exter-
mination. They asked II they might
stop overnight with him.
Gentlemen. said Bronston, "do it
happen that they's q giniral among
your"
No, there didn't happen TO be.
"A Judge, mebbe, or vice presi.
dent?"
There was not. Il was an unofficial
party. The only man with anything ap-
preaching an official designation was
young fellow who was Portuguese con-
sui in seaport town down east. He
wasn't native OF Portugal himself
Just n plain American citizen, who had
been appointed to the place because he
had the time to attend to the few duties.
"Concernin q consul, said Bronston
refiectively. II don't know. l never
heard Of SIGH Doubtless, mebbe. it's n
responsible an honorable job. "
He was answered that IL was
well, he suggested, ''mebbe he'll
do Come ont here in the yard, gentle
men. an the exercises will begin.
They had no idea what was coming.
but Bronston explained briefly. and the
young man seemed perfectly willing to
take his part III the melee, though the
others. terrified, tried their best TO
argue Bronston out Of II. The desert
claim settler made rush at his victim
and found he wasn't there. He had care
fully stepped aside. and as the mountain
fighter Numbered past him the consul
hit him on the ear Then the Portuguese
representative followed up his advan'
tage, and leaping upon the PROSTATE
Bronston battered his head against the
ground until he had worn hole in the
hard soil He picked Brouston up and
threw him out into the road, and then
went out and threw him back again
The Portuguese consul, il may be re-
marked, had spent the better part OF his
life learning how to box and wrestle,
and this was his first opportunity 10 let
himself out.
In an hour Bronston came back 10 life
He YEARLY looked about him and said,
Gentlemen, did dozen or two su.
preme court judges sneak up while l
want lookin an tackle me?' He was
told that no such thing bad happened.
"P'raps it was state legislator"
No, IL was just young man who was
Portuguese consul.
He drew u sad sigh. II wouldn't a
believed it,. he said. 81 had more con.
fidence in the institutions Of this land
Of freedom Of ourn. To think that man
who has licked governors an state tor
neys an sherifs an congressman should
riner that can't talk the langwidge Of
| his own Turin country! Gentlemen,
they amt no use bein patriotic no
more. The republican form Of gov 'ment
Is crumblin an she's Roin to fall. Dog II
all. beat the daylights out Of reg lar
| United States senator wunst, an here i
am on the broad Of my back with two
ribs broke by "A emissary Of despotism
The games over, an the U. 5. Of Amer
icky amt got chip to cash in"
The speaker Of the house Of representa-
tives went up that way 10 hunt after.
ward but when somebody suggested TO
the desert claimant that here was an ex.
cellent chance to give greatness fitting
pugilistic reception he said II was no
use. He would very likely whip the
statesman, but what would be the goodi
Since the young men Of the country had
got to prostitu,ing their great talents to
the service of foreign dynasties he felt
that the country had gone to the dogs
and that there would be no substantial
JOY even in backing the eye of the presi.
dent himself. Chicago Record.
An Actors speech.
The oratorical and speechmakipg
habit on the part Of some ot the stage
luminaries often leads to striking il mol
ridiculous results. De Wolf Hopper,
decked out AZ Spanish soldier Of the
sixteenth century, in the act Of recitine
the performances of the immortal Casey
Is case in point. Could anything more
absurd I've imagined than Francis vii.
son, in the costume Of a vagabond, max.
ing serious speech, assailing his enc
mics and hurling figures Of speech at
his detractors To be called on for a
speech when robed in such habiliments
would be sufficient to discomfort any.
body, including the actor. Jerome