The age-herald., 1898-07-17
ICopyright, 1S9s.1


 We-that is, the large establishment in which a number of people, including me, two dogs and a canary bird, are counted-have decided to what place we will hie q rather like that expression; it sounds as if I had intentions toward the stage). Really, we think the ideal place is reached. It is farm with lot of room outdoors and not too much in. Consequently the supply of board- CTS is limited. The landlady has some ideas tending toward civilization. since there is bathtub. and she can realize unlike the average landlady, that people of fastidious tastes prefer when there Is only one tub in the house to have it ln- timately acquainted with the scruooing brush and some soda and hot water once in awhile. I once went to farm house in the really rightly country where I used to help with the tea things, assist the ''purps'' to chase the mice in the barn and teach the girls in the fam fly how to cut their skirts after the latest new fashion, but woe is me! The mouse no longer fears me, for when l start to run a twinge of rheumatism announces to him that grabbed youth ana rneu1ldl1SIu CdnilOl uh litCl iiiiiA with success, though they do some times.
 However, to return to the present. which when one has passed 21 is always pleasanter than the past, we are here. Like the detective in the melodrama who always pops up and saves the heroine, "We have came" How we will like it remains to be seen. This morn ing, when felt little poorly and one shutter would shake, our courteous land lady fetched genial looking gentleman to arrange the shutter, who, seeing me arrayed as most people are who are in bed, gave me no opportunity to say any thing. but announced that he had daughters of his own and needn't apol- ogize. He little knew that had no in- tention of doing this for had put on matinee jacket with pink ribbons espe- cially for his benefit. At first I did not understand exactly why he looked at me with what seemed a measuring eye.
 He appeared to be taking me in by inches.
 Then think of it. I learned that this shutter fixing person was the village undertaken, and he was staring at me with an eye to business. But I am glad to know that gentle and genial as he was he will never make anything off me- for when I bid goodby to this gay and festive world I shall depart in plain pine box. want nobody to look at me and want to be taken to my grave in a wagon and have only cou- pie of the men of my family at the funeral
 But we will drop that now and talk about going to the country. When we -<.sr yl.>x~- were all the rest of them, and then I came with the two dogs bowling with delight because they were going to ride in a baggage car and be made much of while young man who has weakness for me carried the canary, chirping its shrillest because it realized it was go- ing where it can be in the sunshine all day long and can sniff the very sweet est of flowers. Then there were a cou- pie of men who announced that they wouldn't carry a thing, but who stag gered under a dress suit case contain ing something which was forgotten un- til the last moment while somebody else had box of candy a pound of fine tea and three umbrellas and a storm coat. which we forgot to put up, but they had to go, so they went And when we got there, there was a large wagon to meet us. and we looked as if we had just arrived from the old country, and we went sailing (metaphorically) sitting on our trunks. The two dogs turned up their noses at this, so one sat in my lap. while Molly held the other one, who would insist on trying to catch flies
 There are times when puppy, cheer ful as he may be, is somewhat in the way. On our arrival this truth was proved. since the two small fox ter riers got into a fight with a large col lie, and, much to the sorrow of our small boy, it was interrupted. The col lie was tied up in the stable, while the two pups went out, sat just outside it, and he walled as if there were going to be a death in the neighborhood until the farmer united him, and then they all kissed and shook paws and were good friends. The average dog is very peculiar and would rather eat some dirty old bone covered with cold fat and fshed out of a coal scuttle than a nice piece of chicken on a china plate To return to the two legged ones.
 As far as can be expected, we are now settled, and we sit out on the veranda and are industrious beyond expression and lounge in halnmocks and read or go to sleep, but we take life easily and find that we gain flesh by doing so. We have wonderful discussions, in which the farmers daughter joins, running in every now and then from the kitchen, where she is making cherry pies, to give her opinion. which is not flow cry, but a floury, one.
 We have discussed the war, killed the Spaniards, own the world, having long ago possessed the flesh and the devil. Then we come down to clothes, and the daughter, who is pretty girl, with a very good idea as to the correct l thing in frocks and other things, said, 1 having given the last look at the pies, | Do you know I never can get veil | 10 suit me"
 And girl who came with us and who l s counted one of the best dressed in the l ;ity grew slangy and answered, sYou | lre not the only one-dear, no!" Then l -he farmers daughter whose name is | Bessy (doesn'R that suggest clover and ! good things to eat and dimpled cheel,s?). l said: "Every time go to New York I | lAve the same old bother. If put my 5eiI On tight, either my eyelashes poke