The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1898-03-31
A PRACTICAL JOKE.

-. By J. II. Wolfe. -.
~~>>>>

TN MANY respects Tom Drummer was
acknowledged to be one of the best
fellows. His penchant, however, for
practical joking, though it never sa-
vored of malice, gained as a rule more
censure than appreciation. For one
reason, his jokes were not alwaysin good
taste; and the case in point will serve as
an illustration. It took the form, first
of all, of an advertisement in one of the
Gailies, to wit:
"A gentleman, unattached and under
30, with good income, would like to
make the acquaintance of an amiable
young lady with view to matrimony.
Address, in confidence. x 100, Office of
this paper.
He smiled grimly as he read it over in
print, wondering, with curious interest,
what sort of replies he would get, and
how he should treat them. Although,
literally speaking, he was unattached
that is to say, although there was no
spoken engagement between him and his
old playmate and friend, Nellie Marsh
he felt that he was sufficiently idol
lied by that lady, and sufficiently under
the spell of her charms, to defy the
possible influence of any of the :appl-
cants, however, fascinating.
Moreover, as his income was at pres
emit too modest to permit of his marry
Ing anybody, he went into the jest with
double sense of safety.
The replies were several, and, on the
whole, not interesting. Most of them
were from matrimonial agents, who
promised, for reasonable fees, to pro-
cure him the necessary introduction,
while guaranteeing their clients
amiability and every other virtue. The
rest, with one exception, were palpably
bogus. The terseness of this one, apart
from it's neat and ladylike handwriting,
gave it genuine ring. It read as fol-
lows:
IF the advertiser is willing to send
by post further particulars about him
self and exchange photos with the
writer the confidence will be respected.
Address, Miss Townshend, ~ Hill street,
Kings Oval"
"Decidedly the lady means bust
ness,' thought Tom; and the thought
led to others, which convinced him that
in following up the joke he would run
risk of making an ass of himself, or
worse. After all, it was clear there
was not much fun to be got out of the
affair; and he was about to put this re-
ply, with the rest, in the fire, when sud-
denly a new idea struck him.
While rummaging among his collec-
ton of photos day or two previous he
had come across one of a club acquaint-
ance, a Mr.. Pellingham, which had
reached him on some forgotten occa-
sion, probably through third party.
AS this photo happened to be on his
table at the moment he placed it in an
envelope. He then looked up the adj
dress of the original, whom he knew
to be a single man like himself, and
boldly indited the following letter:
maple Terrace, Regents Park-Dear
Miss T townsend: In Acknowledgement of
your letter, I inclose my photo, and beg to
state that am junior partner of the firm
of dawson & Pellingham, railway con-
trat tors. My object in advertising I shall
hope to explain, with further particulars,
at an early interview. leave the appoint
ment in your hands, and sign myself
Yours faithfully,
ALFRED PELLINGTiAM"
This letter he inclosed with the photo
and posted off to the address in Kings
Oval; chuckling at the tale Pelling-
ham might have to tell on some future
occasion.