Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1898-09-11

Bowser. Did you spell it with an
e or an 'a'?'
With an "a of course
men you are a party to the swim
die. | have lived in this world for 4S
years, end it he's always been spelled
with an 'e' by honest people. By what
authority do you put an "a in ito"
L presume | was wrong" she an
swered, hoping to dodge the question.
On, you do? Well, its something to
own IN. Let's see what Webster SAYS
P, Q, r, S-here it is. By George, but
he's get an "a in it, Say, now but
want to understand this matter. Do
you spell separately with an 'a'?'
''Scm-sometimes.
Don't fool with me, Mrs. Bowser.
Here is sOapmaker who deliberately
puts ont sWindle on childhood, and
our family grocer is in partnership
with him. So is old Noah Webster, and
so are you, / say that separately is
spelled with an e | once took the
prize at a spelling school on that word,
and I've written it with an e in law,
insurance and real estate papers a mil
lien times. By what right do you and
old Webster spell it with an az"
Because that's the correct way, and
you'll find it so in every dictionary in
the land" replied Mrs. Rowser.
"Oh. 1 will! That is to say l have
been wrong all these years, have l.?
Not on your life.~ Hand me that news
paper. I'll find that>vord and prove I'm
right a hundred times Overt"
After hunting for minute Mr.. Bow
h.
spelled according to Webster and Mrs.
Bowser He was pale-faced as he
Clared at her and swallowed a lump
in his throat, and his voice was hardly
above a whisper as he finally said:
Il will look into this contemplate
swindle to a further degree tomorrow
and if l don't have some one in jail be-
fore Saturday night you can call me a
goat. Meanwhile, here is another catch.
How do you spell the word 'unri-
valled'?'
What is the use of fussing with an
old soap advertisement when we might
go out and enjoy pleasant EVENING"
asked Mrs. R0wser as she rose up.
s"The use is that this sCap-maker as
listed by hundreds of grocers. has been
putting out a swindle on the people,
and it is my duty and your duty to
help expose him. How do you spell the
word?'
With one T."
Then you are also in the swindle
and ought to be sent to prison, Web
ster and every other authority on the
face of this globe spells it with two
is. | was looking it up for Brown
only a week ago. How many bars Of
soap were you to get for being part
ner in the swindle?"
Mrs. Bowser turned to Webster and
pointed ont the word. 1t was spelled
with one ~ only,
Then he's a liar and a fraud"
shouted Mr.. Bowser as he smote the
big book with his fist. The copy
consulted last week had two Is in it
as big as a house. So he's in the soap
swindle with the rest Of you, There
a silver medal in my desk l won on
spelling that word when l was twenty
years old, and now you and Webster
and some soap man pretend that I'm
all wrong"
Mrs. B0wser looked into the back
yard and held her peace and mentally
vowed TO cut off the ears of that gro
GERS boy the next time he showed up,
and Mr.. Bowser walked up and down
and snorted his disgust. BY and by ha
said:
perhaps you'll tell me that I have
been wrong all these years in spelling
the word descriptive with an i in the
first syllable?'
Il presume lots of people spell it
that way" she answered.
But do you and Webster and the
soap-maker contend that it's wrong?"
he insisted.
Yes; we spell it with an e."
He picked up the dictionary and
looked to see. 1t was spelled with an
'e', He carried the volume to the open
window and heaved it into the back
yard. and turning on Mrs. Bowser he
asked:
DO you know what I was going to
do to-night?'
No"
Il was going to take you to a roof
garden for couple of hours, and then
have an elegant supper afterwards"
Il should have enjoyed it,
Your birthday comes Tomorrow
When we got home 1 should have put
seven-stone diamond ring on your
finger as present.
How sweet of you!"
'ACd having made an extra hundred