New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1898-09-02
THE TALK or THE DAY.

Saws THE Philnd slphia Record: AS n trloute
TO tho Few Navy which performed such marvellous
work in the recent unpleasnntness with Spain tho
American Mail Steamship Company has decided
10 name the four vessels now being constructed
at Cramps shipyard after the American admirals.
Tho Admiral Sampson Will be launched IN ABOUT
two weeks. and the Admiral Dewey the Admiral
Sch,cy and the Admiral Walker viii follow In sue
caes,on There was some discussion among officials
Of the company as 10 which admiral was entitled t,
he ropro.entcd by the fourth ship. but it
hraly decided TO honor Admiral Walker.
Mutuol consratul1t'ons.-"Hello. hello. On, Is
This is Miss dare Who is talking"
"Don't YOU know my voice. Its Nappy"
yes yes. Nappy-Nappy Bonapar'e. Don't
"Oh yes rs Mr. Ronaparte You must excuse
meC,here's such a ouzzns in the phone"
That's 90. I just called you up 10 offer my con-
congratulations what for7"
Why. that American war IS sure 10 throw US oo,n
that's 40 Ain. It nice? Such rest for both
Thank you much for reminding me- OF the pleas
ami fact Goodby. Nappy."
Br-r-r-r-r.-CCcvciand Plain Dealer.
Citizens OF Fargo. y D.. according TO n CORE
spondent Of The Boston Transcript" say that the
divorce business gives them a chance to become
acquainted with some OF the most cultivated and
interesting people ~ the East. and II IL "A mntter
Of frequent reference tina, Mrs So-nnd-So. OF Dos
ton spent last winter here. and that Colonel y. Of
the Regular Army. Ia expected as soon "A hosi-
ties close. There is evidence OF considerable con-
tagion I'm this divorce habit One woman II Is re
lated. came here TO visit brother VINO was serv-
ing his three months OF residence and although
she never thought Of divorce when she started
concluded that while here. and since II could DO
done so conveniently. she would shake or the
cumbersome ties ot matrimony. Many OF tho young
people Of tho city too. have come to think that
NJ prN
At hand, for which persons from distance pay
so heavily.
Long I'm getting too stout for comfort, but am
una BILE To find remedy
Short-It il said that nothing reduces surplus
LONG But have nothing to worry me ,,,nr
Short-Weli. Just 10 help you out, I'm Wiling
TO let you lend me slO.-(Chicago News
The experiment Of employing women as
ductors on the streetcars of ChIlllcothe Ohio. has
proved "A success. A local paper says that they
perform their duties in polite. faithful ana con-
sc!ontous manner. with no funny business about
t. and they command the respect and admiration
OF everybody. Even the rougher element OF man.
kind who would not hesitate to impose on a man.
are toned down by the gentlcr influence ana do not
attempt any forbidden privileges. FOR they know
# would not be tolerated for moment. The con-
ductors are seven In number. all from families
OF responsibility and each Is possessed OF un-
usual degree Of nttractveness. The women work
md receive s. week for their services
Very Dlscouraging DID you hear OF the Cara
proposal TO disarm Europe?" inquired the officer
Yes" answered Admiral Camara With emotion
ut does seem that this feet OF mine has got 10 be
destroyed somehow or other -tWashington star
rho Kcnnebcc Journal says that young
was recently taken to "A Lewiston hospital and
suffered the removal OF n rib When he came to
himself he told what had been done. and
seemed satisfied. Shortly after he dropped into
semi unconscious state. and kept calling for THE
woman" For two days he was delirious. and FREE
quenty called for the woman" Il want TO see
the woman" he kept saying. At last the nurse In
desperation said. We'll. I'm the woman The
man looked at her critically from TOP to toe. and
said WHO would have thought that they could
have made such pretty girl Of one of my ribs"
And then he settled back on his pillow and when
he awoke again he In his right mind and
better.
The master was coldly critical
You can paint minor details we'll, he observed.
a9r ase ne hs ear ali ,he ures Of
sna ow s1ae How H' in your
tail Hoy w. faulty StIos be aoSa BE-, cas-, b D,
upon the floor and weep aloud In his chagrn.-
Detroit Journal
A recent issue OF The Hardeman Tenn) Free
Press contained the following paragraph: We
wish explain our lack of editorial this week
We was down to Memphis and II smart Alec at
i
vinegar. or course. we were horse dew COM
baw for three days. and now that able to
talk, our language Is not TT for publication"
MI wise-Johnny. you tell why the little
hand my watch goes faster than the big one?
Johnny latter mature rehection)-Papa. Amt II
just like why have to run when | 90 walking
with you?-(Jewelers Weekly.
A Boston publishing Arm that issues school read
ers recently received the following letters from
rural school trustees:
Mr.. - have baught all fables Story Books
and Novels am Coin to ] shall the Board
abot 1t first. have Baught all School Books
Requard am Citing teard Of Byng Novels.
Yours.
Dear Sir
Can not Get no mobiles tnoves) book for Scool
Book. he reed Out OF his Reeders and not
Out OF the Fairtall Stories Books Yours Truey
IT is solemn thing" said the young man,
when woman trusts man with her Affections
~ amt as solemn. ~ said the man with the dry
goods necktie. AS when she won't trust him with
his own "-dndianapoils Journal