Alexandria gazette. [volume] (Alexandria, D.C.) 1834-1974, 1898-02-19


Penzance" as Told by Mr.. Haymow,
of Fairfax County, to His Friend
Dedicated to the Members Of the
"Sharps and Flat" by r. j. e.
"Well, you know Jim, my cousin in
vited me 10 20 in to Alexandria and see
opera, she called it, SO we went, and
we had seats away down in the front
row. Well, it wss the greatest piece
l ever did see. First, lady came OUT
and waved stick at some men setteU
by her, and then few more waves OF
the stick and cul tai went up, and
thar was passei of fellers setten'
around playin' cards and maxim
believe they was q drinEin' somt-
thin what feller in knee dress
was pourin' out of an empty bottle, and
I they was singin' to feller who 'peared
like be was the pet of the camp.
"Atter that man come on all dress
ed up in red coat and some kind OF
yaler boots (what he couldn't keep up)
and long black hair and herc3 nous
tache, and he suug out that ue was d
Pirate Chief and That be Was proud OF
il. Il looked so foolish 10 me 10 stand
up thar aud sing. 1t seems to me il
would have been more natural like :
ne had come out and just stood up tha
ard said to them pirate fellers, I'm The
the boss of this sher camp, and dom
you forgit it. After he surg some nj,
about who he was, they all went oil
al left the old woinau what does the
coohin' aud washin' for 'em, with this
purly f, ,ller what they called Freddi-. e.
and seemed like 10 me she was mon
strous anxious to marry him. Freddie
was little shy about marryin' her, be-
cause she wheeled him about in car
riage when be was baby, but while
they was tryin' TO git the matter set
tied, the sound OF gals voices come from
behind the stage somewbar, and
then he run around look
in and a pear;n' about, maxim
out he didn't know whar the sound
come from, and when he saw they was
al beautiful young gals, he looked dag
gers at the cook, what he called Ruth,
and po' thing, thought be would juct;
ner arm of'en her, and she cried aud
begged him not to leave her, till deed
it was rale pitiful. He told her to scat
and SO she seated, aud then he r,-
membered he wasn't much dressed up,
so he said be would hide and he no
sooner got out OF sight, than in come
passeI of gals, and as purity lot, jun, a
ever seen and they was all lookn'
around like they didn't know whar
they Was and then they began TO sing
how they was cli,1 bin over rock!
mountains, like they thought | was GO
in to believe that yarn. Why when |
studied g'e g'aphy the Rocky mountains
wasn't no whar near Alexandria, bur
maybe they have changed places since
We was young, Jim, because, come to
think or it, the Bible does Soy the
mountains skipped like rams. Well,
after they all got through singin they
started in to dancin' and it did do me
good to see them gals dance-forward
and back, and swing yer partner and
ring around rosy and all, and then
three of 'em what seemed to be the
leaders like, they danced and sech
bowin' and scrapin'; first this way
and then that way, but after they got
their balance they sutenly did dance
purity.
After they had enough frolicin' one
Little gal says I wonder whar we air
at A standin' up thar as deliberate
like, askin' that question like she
didn't know she was in the Alexandra
Opera House, and then one of the 9th
ers SAYS: L wonder whar our pa is at
and then they ali made out they was
awful anxious about the old man. They
didn't worry about him long, because
thew all got to talkin' about goin' in
wadin', and was takin' oil their shoes,
when who should come in, just in time
to the fddles, but the pet of the camp,
and be sung at them and they sung
back at him. They kept that up for q
right smart while, and we'll as | could
isdge. he was askin' them all to let
MIN marry them. don't know wheth-
er he came from Utah or no, but
its agin the law in our country.
I cert'enly was glad when every one OF
them gals told him very decided like,
thew didn't want him, and while he
was beggin', and beggin', in come,
right on time, lill-e eai, VIZ oit"
like German canary, and sayin she
would take him and thank him too,
and, by jingoes, he does look SC glad
that thar was one of 'em what didn'
turn him down. The other gals look
ed kinder sorry that they didn't take
him, after somebody else had him, but
lhey didn't grieve long, for IN come
these same pirate telIers, and each one
grabbed gal, and the gals made o9t
thew wanted to git away, but notlceo,
Jim, they didn't try very hard Inc
pirates began to sing that they was
eoin' to marry them right then ana
thar, and they would have done it too,
if their pa, who was High Monkey
Monk, hadn't stepped in, jest IN the
nick of time. He wanted to Know
what was goin' on, aud while the p
rates was tellin' him, in rushed lne
cook agin, and begs the pet OF tne
camp' to remember her. l tell you,
Jim, 1 cert'eDly was outdone with them
pirates. The cook says to him, says
she, don't foreit me- and the pirates