The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1898-05-02
The Colonel With a Mania for
Patriotic Speeches.
CAPTURED A MULES TAIL
The Only Time That Cavalry Made a
Laughing Charge-A Joke on
the the Band-Hit by a
Spent Bullet.

patriotic addresses ON every possible
occasion. We had them at dress pa
rade, when so miles from the front,
and we had them while waiting i'm line
of battle. our colonel chucked Bunker
Hill, Lexington. General Washington
and other patriotic things at us until
we got very tired of his talk. and there
was universal rejoicing when the end
finally came. My regiment was ordered
out n day for a reconnaissance. There
wasn't a confederate within II miles
of the brigade camp, and most of us
knew that IL was simply "A march to
test our endurance. but before we left
camp the colonel got OF that same old
speech. We Were going to meet the
enemy. he said, and he looked for ev-
cry man to fight to the last gasp and
then die Will "A hip-hurrah, for the
glorious old star-spangled banner.
Away we marched, singing John
Brow and aching to yield up our
lives. and after about two hours reach
ed a crossroads. Scouts had reported
the enemy near at hand. and gave their
force at 10000. There wasn't the slight
est doubt i'm our colonel's mind that he
could lick 1900 men with his 1000,
and we were speedily drawn up in bat
tie array. AS we got into line we heard
a mule braying on the crossroads. and
NV ''ioi'i WV ouA III " VI ~ fii's
waved his sword three times around
his head. and began:
Soldiers and patriots! The enemy IL
upon us. He outnumbers us ten To one
and IL fighting on his own soil, but
I'm u veins runs the blood of the men
who died to create this republic, and
W. will win a great victory or die"
We cheered and flung up our caps,
and the colonel was radiant as he con
tinued:
IF we live to see the sun go down
we shall be heroes: II we fall, then our
names will be inscribed on the tablets
of time forever more. Remember Lex
ington, Remember Bunker Hin, Re
member those patriots who starved and
suffered"
At thai moment a scout who had
been Sent up the crossroad to take
another look at the enemy came down
the road and along our front. leadins
IN old one-eyed bob-tailed mule which
had been turned out To die. stopping
I'm front of the colonel the man saluted
and reported:
Il have been up the road for "A mile
and a half and the only enemy I could
iscov was this here mule. | have
cut of his tail to carry back To camp,
and Cwaving IL around his head | call
for three cheers for the ~star-spangled
banner and George Washington"
We gave them with "A will, and added
three more and "A tiger" and that
ended the patriotic address bushes.
with us forever.
There were times, as at Trevillion
Station, when Custer ordered his band
into the thick of 1t and kept them toot-
ing. and the idea was a good one. At
Gettysburg, however, the band didn't
come I'm. Custer was after Lees trains
and Lees cavalry realized his plans
and were on hand To prevent. As the
scenes shifted We found the confederate
cavalry massing to hoVe a try at us,
instead of keeping the defensive. A
battery came dashing up ana opened on
them at Ions range, and following this
four regiments were lined up for a
charge. il was To be dow across a
field. over a stone wall partly thrown
down. and then across "A meadow for
40 rods. We We're not above 1000 men
altogether, n IL looked as IL we were
going down against three times our
number. There was "A period of wait
ing, with overstrained men speaking i'm
whispers and nervous horses plungins
or backing. We We're hoping To get
the bugle and have IL over with when
the members of the ban began climb
ing up on the roof of Il long shed to
u right. This shed was matched
with straw. ms the elevation would
give the spectators IA splendid view of
the charge. The "tooters' had Just
got fairly seated on the thatch when
the confederates opened ON us with a
single gun. The first shot went over
our heads, but the second struck the
shed just at the caves and went
through IL with "A crash. As IL passed
out ON the far side IL drew a wisp of
straw after II 10 feet long.
Those band men didn't wait for the
bnR alA 49,. III
and took "A roll down the slope and a
drop to the ground and the sight set
5000 men To laughing. The trooper in
line waved their hats and yelled. and
faces which had been as pale as death
turned red as man after man struck
with a plump and got up and made
for the rear. We were all yet laugh
ing, and | saw broad grins on the OFF,
GERS faces, when w got the bugle call.
We were over the wall and halfway
across the meadow before the Chuckles
were suppressed and men began To
clench their teeth and think uf the seri-
GUS work i'm hand. The lighting was
hot and saVagc when We got at il. but
] believe II was the only instance in
the whole war where "A body of cavalry
made what might be called a laugh
ing charge"
Some II or 20 of Us. under command
of a second lieutenant. had been sent
OUT win a wagon aftef forage. We
had loaded the wagon with corn and
hay and were ready to drive Off. when
a bushwhackpr VINO was hidden be-
hind a hay stack fired upon the officer.
IL was a long shot. and probably fired
i'm bravado. but the lieutenant dropped
like a log. As Ne ran To him and lifted
up his mead he feebly moaned:
Boys, don't give up the ship! Rally
around me and die hghting,"
We rallied, but as we couldn't see
anything TO fight we thought We had
better see what could be done for our
stricken leader.
Its too late-too late" he moane
Il have only "A few minutes 10 live. and
] want you to remember my last words.
Tell u colonel that ! died with my
face To the foe. and hat my last words
were for o TO perish in your tracks.
Write to my mother-
Here he seemed about to give up the