Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-10-12
SPINNING WHEEL.
JIM.


JIM.
] hear the drum roll, rub-a-dub, dub,
And the piccolo'S shrill refrain;
The boys in blue, with hearts so true
Are marching home again.
| hear the drum. but it beats for me
Despair and grief's tattoo;
I'd be so glad if our only lad
Our Jim-poor Jim-marched, too!
1 hear the tramp. the tramp, tramp, tramp
Of the army marching by:
Brave soldiers all, at their country's call,
They went to fight and die.
Their task is done; with heads erect
They pass there in review;
Instead of tears I'd give them cheers
II Jlm-poor Jlm-marched TOO.
I hear the clank, the clank. clank, clank,
Of the swords of captains gay; >
But my worn eyes rest on the biood-stalned
Of a hill far, far away.
They left him there where the weeping
Sing dirges faint and few
They're home-God's light! How grand the
If JimNpoor Jim-marched, too.
George Hobart III Baltimore American.
"George!'' she screamed, my neck.r'
whats the matter?"
There's q pillacatter-'
"a what!'
a taperkiller-"
What in the world do you meant"
ooh, DEAR she moaned, as she clutched
him frantically.. "A kitterpa Ter. You
.'Oh!' said George. with evident relief,
and he proceeded to brush the future but
terfy away.-Exchange.
Some years ago DR.. S. Weir Mitchell
of Philadelphia was troubled with a nerv-
Gus ailment, induced, it was thought, by
his ~unfiagging energy in two lines OF
work, says the Atlanta Constitution.
His condition became so serious that he
went abroad, thinking that a change of
scene and a giving III of his labors might
tend to make a well men of him. In
Paris he suffered an attack of the Old
trouble and deemed it well to call upon a
certain specialist With whose name he
was familiar as being that OF a man ia
nous on both continents.
He visited the physician purely as a pa
tent and did not even give him his name.
During the conversation preliminary to
the examination the Partisan said: Il
see you are an American"
Yes answered DR.. Mitchell, Il am
an American"
(Which is your home city," he was
asked and replied. philadelphia"
The French physician held UP both
hands and exclaimed: "What. Il man
come to me here in Paris to be treated
for a nervous ailment When his own home
is in Philadelphia, where resides the most
famous nerve specialist in the World.'
ITO whom do you refer?" asked the
author.
"Ah, you have never heard? Why. to
DR.. S. Weir Mitchell, Of course"
A parrot owned by an Arch street ply
sician gave signs Of possessing almost
human intelligence" the other night. a
party of young folks were on the lawn and
were spending an hour in guessing rid
dies. Finally, a young lady asked: why
does a dog turn around twice before he
lies down?'' Before anybody could an
| swer, the parrot croaked: "One good turn
| deserves Observation-Disclosures Call.
They are telling a good story against
the Boston child. which may be a chest
nut for aught one knows; but if it has
been going the rounds the "Chatterer' of
the Herald did not meet with it until the
other day. 1t seems a Boston mamma
was in~structing her little daughter how
to behave when she went to luncheon at
the bishops house. Nov, dear, when
the butler hands you something the first
time, take a little on YOU plate. When
he comes the second time, you may help
yourself to a little more; but the third
t1lllC SOu mGSC Say NJ, ludIh SOuy
just as you always do at home" So the
little Boston child went to the bishops
house to lunch and came home much de-
lighted with her visit. Did you do just
as | told you, darling?" inquired mamma
anXiously. Yes, | did, was the reply.
I took something very nice when it was
handed to me the first time, and then,
when the butler came again, l took a lit
tie more, but the third time | said: No.
l thank you But when he came the
fourth time, you hadn't told me what to
do, SO l just thought of papa, and said:
No, damn your"
According to an exchange two young
women were discussing halloween spells
and cantrlps III advance. and the brother
of one of them was offering occasional
suggestions.
You get an egg that has never been
laid before-Ered, | wish you would go
away and attend to your own business.
l mean an egg that has been laid by a
hen that has never laid an egg BEFORE
A returned volunteer tells a good story,
which, by the way, goes to show that Of
hcers were not f~easting while the men
were living on ordinary army rations.
One of our generals in Cuba entertained.
1t seems, some visiting officers at his
field quarters near the fighting line be-
fore Santiago. The fare resembled in
simplicity the legendary roasted sweet
potatoes of Revolutionary times. but the
hosts hearty welcome and still more
his wealth of good stories carried along
the meager menu. At length, however,
there came a pause, both gastronomic
and conversational. The guests were
awaiting what next when the old ne
gro servant was heard to hiss into the
generals ear: Give EN- another big
! no1 ~A~b =