The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1898-04-20
HUMoR OF THE DAY.

He's she really so curious?'
She-"Curious? Why, she'd listen to
advice. Brooklyn Life.
1.-TWO souls with but single thought"
The poem says, nor errs-
His thought is all of her, you see,
And so, likewise, is hers.
Chicago News.
Fweddie-"Aw, 1 couldn't get along
without my watch" She-"How much
do they let you have on it?"-Harlem
Life.
Suitor-"Sir, I love your daughter"
Blunt Father-"Well, sir. What does
that proye?"-Philadelphia North
American.
The Boy-"I guess sisters beau
must be engaged to her at last" The
Girl-"Why?" The Boy-"He has
quit giving me money. ."-Up-to-Date.
"Don't you think my new
bonnet is n perfect dream?" Matte
cts more than dream, dear; it's
genuine nightmare. Chicago News.
you've voted here once to-day"
said the election officer. Nonsense,
replied the repeater, unsbashed; you
see, I'm twins. ".-Philadelphia Amer
ican.
Parker always exaggerates every
thing SO" eyes; he can't even start
an account at the bank without over
drawing it. ."-Columbus (Ohio) State
Journal
"Do you think it is like me-" she
asked as she showed him her latest
photograph. "Like you?" he repeat
ed. 81 can almost hear it. t."-Indian-
apolis Journal.
"This mandolin cost only $40, and
it will last your daughter lifetime"
ga lifetime? Gracious! Show me
one that will last her about ten days"
Chicago News.
Jones-'I started to ask Newlywed
whether two could live on what one
could, but" Brown-''Butw what?"
Jones-"But he struck me for ten
before 1 could finish. Puck.
Traveler-"Don't you ever get tired
answering so many fool questions?"
Ticket Agent "Yes." Traveller
(which one tires you most?" Ticket
Agent THAT one. Chicago News.
pride" said Uncle Eben, "am er
good ting in its place. But er coun-
try or er citizen is in hahd luck when
he ain got muffin much 'ceppin' his
pride ter be proud of. Washington
Star.
Buffers Come, you owe me an
apology. / hear you said there was
nothing in my head" Chesley-"I
hope you will forgive me. forgot
about the wheels. Boston Trans
cript.
"Our Cousin John, who lives next
door to us, has gone to the Klondike. D."
weren't you sorry to see him go?"
"Not SO awfully sorry. He took his
six dogs with him. Chicago Tri.
bune.
"Joes is looking all over town for
ycu. h)O Dut Il ia
keeping under cover. 1t must be that
1 owe him money or that he wants 10
owe me some. philadelphia North
American
"Young Mr.. Enjee is quite statu
esque," remarked one young woman.
eyes" was the answer. "He strikes
attitudes all the time he is awake. All
he does is to pose and repose. y
Washington Star.
He-"The trouble with too many
people in this world is that they never
stop to think" She-''Yes, but l no.
tice that the most successful people
are the ones that don't have to stop to
think. Chicago News.
Conclusion: Sportsman (who has
bagged nothing and is bargaining for
a hare) Seven n-and-sixpence? That's
rather high, isn't it?" Shopkeeper-
"Ah, but see what splendid place it's
been hit. Pick -Me-Up.
Really, my dear, you are not blind
enough to think that the count has
real love for you?" SIT does seem in
credible, does it not? But he has
offered to let me keep half the dowry
for myself. f."-Cincinnati Enquirer.
Professor bad One of my
pupils, to whom l have given two
courses of instruction in the cultiva'
ton of the memory, has forgotten to
pay me, aud the worst of it is, 1 can't
remember his ame!"-Fliegende