The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1898-03-12
H.A 81 :.
B --: "a ~
NEVADA


GOOD evening, Miss You look like
regiment of rosebnds tonight. File
gende Batter.
s''They say all the neeessaries OF lie
are very dear in tine KIondike' Not
ut all. Ice is SO cheap they can't give
1t away."-Pnek.
Photographer-"No try TO look like
yourself" Noting the efreetl-'Well-
er, Inn: try to look like Somebody
else Harlem Life.
Johnny-"Papa. what is factionT
Papa-"It Is a terms used to describe
that section of the party 10 which you
do not belong Puck.
Friend-"This seems to be a comfort
able fiat" Tfarleiiiite-"It does. II
makes that impression on everybody
who doesn't live in it."-Puck.
Elderly Goquette fsentlmentally)-
"Yes, my dear Mr. Assessor, love is
eternal Assessor ffrlghtenedl-'So |
perceive. Fliegende Blatter.
Experience" said Uncle Eben. as
er good teacher: hut education Is li'ble
ter be wasted on er man dat don pen
on muffin. else Washington Star.
Execntlve-.I would appoint" your
man, but he's too ignorant for The po-
lice force Heeler =.Den put him on
the school beard. New York Herald.
Does my whistling disturb your
"Oh, not in the least. I'm used 10 hear
ing men whistle. I'm a collector for a
millinery house. Workers Statesman.
A Long Head.-"Why does that hard
drinking Beasley wear his hat all the
timer For fear he cant get i on II
he takes il of. "-Cleyeland Plain
Dealer.
Mistress Bridget, are there any let
tiers for me this morning. Bridget
Only two. postal cards. but there's
nothing of importance in them. Pile
gende Batter.
A Dllemma.-.'WeH George. dear,
what do you think of my new hat"
II wish | knew" Knew whatY
"What | am expected to think. "-Clevc-
land Plain Dealer.
How 1t May Be.-"People are not
nike, and what suits one may not
please another Il guess that's right.
What is one mans bicycle is another
mans juggernaut Puck.
Il hear" said the zephyr. that you
have been raging through the north
west. Never was worse mistake
Al II 4 81 n
coo" -Indianapolis Journal.
He docking out at the window
SO bright and cheerful within and so
cold and gloomy without She
"Without whatY7 He-"Nhy, without
you. dearest. Chicago News.
Marriage said the Sentimental
Girl. rs a lottery" But the trouble
Is" said the Pessimistic Bachelor,
that the man takes most Of the
chances. Indianapolis Journal.
How He Filled in His Time Magls-
trate-.'What do yon do during the
weekY' Tramp-"Nothing.' Magls-
trate-"And on Sunday" Tramp
Then take day off. ''-Tlt-Biis
Maria. wake up quick!
The house is on fire. You save the
baby Wife-"oh. my wheel. my
wheel~ IIusband-"Gome on, car
rled that out first. Rochester Herald.
First Motller-'Don't you find II
great relief 10 have the children in
school again. Second Mother-"Well,
1t would he II they didn't learn so
many new questions TO ask."-Tit- Bits.
Jean-"why do you never speak to
Mr.. Outref He is uncouth, but | feel
sure he Is n diamond in the rough"
Katherine-"So do /. That's why I'm
cutting him, '-Cineinnati Commercial.
Good Frlend.-.l have reason to sus.
pect that your husband is flirting with
other women. You ought to follow him
wherever he goes" .'.Great. heavens,
My husband IS a postman. "-Fliegende
Blatter.
The Wise roprietor.-aeiuest lin
cheap Recommendations, waitct..this
meal Is simply vile. | won't pay for It,
Where's the proprietor Waiter
Hes out at lunch, sir. Philadelphia
Record,
Kate-"lIe seems extremely devoted
He talks of going to the Klondlke fol
my sake Beatrlce-"Well, that would
give you two chances. He might conn
back with a fortune or he might no
come back at all."--Puek.
Cruel Naomi-"IIes n mean, insult
ing thing" Stella-"WhyT Naomi
Il told him didn't know whether f
go to the opera or the play, and he sail
was old enough TO choose for myself.
Philadelphia American.
Mr.. Wlggles-"The true facts of tn
case were that" Mrs. Wiggles Din
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. did you eve
know any facts that weren true?
And she never heard the rest Of tina
story.-Somelyille Journal
How lie Loved Them.-Mrs. Merry
II never saw boy so fond of pets n
Bobby Is" Mrs. Wallace" Really ?
Mrs. Merry-"Yes. hes worn out
kitten and two pups in the last tw
notf Days.
-. ead of theh dis
consisten.. sastodon dow
Legislature pass. ~ i did
chewing gum and corsei" poop
hate to DO in their places "'
returned home to their WI
all Nol
Hon. v. ]. Bryan. the M