The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1898-11-09

But His wife Discovered his Buss .
Worried Him by Telephone.

WENT TO the oAoHGLoH
hut His wife Dtscovsrsd His Buse 80
Worried Him by Telephone.
When a young man with a reprehen-
sible liking for bachelor Inner marries
a woman who Is much older than ne,
and who believes that the home 10 n
place where a man should spend Dis
evenings. there's bound to be trouble.
Even q person of ordinary intellect can
prophesy that. A well-known New
York couple is now busily verifying
their friends prophecies. Their social
set find itself torn by ~contending emo
tons. The elderly wife Is so
bly, good and so pre-eminently intellect-
ual that. In spite of eccentricities, she
has many friends. The young nus
bands behavior is lamentable. Every
| one disapproves Of the graceless way in
whic he outwits and eludes the vigil
| ance OF his better half. Yet he II an
agreeable, likable fellow. and doesn't
do anything tremendously out OF the
way, n he is so frankly jubilant over
a successful ruse. so like a jolly bad boy
playing hockey. that even the sterner
OF his acquaintances feel q certain sym
| pathy with him.
TIL schemes and diplomacy. the baf-
fed attempts. the daring escapes. the
hairbreadth adventures Of that young
man furnish conversation for all his ac-
qusintances. n his appearance at a
social function. looking gayly triumph
ant. always excites wild curiosity and
promises thrilling narrative. Usually he
successfully eludes detection. but some
times he is caught; and then for weeks
society knows him not. He stays at
home and does penance, with q broken
and contrite heart.
A short time ago a dinner was given
at an uptown club and the young hus-
- a--as- III ~-@an. xvna IN
be a momentous one, n he wanted
exceedingly 10 accept the invitation;
but when he mentioned 1t he was
promptly crushed.
bachelor dinner, indeed!" said Mrs.
Blank. with whitening scorn. AT a
wretched club. too! No, sir! Never Will
/ give my consent to your Joining such
an orgy"
Mr.. Blank knew. by past experience.
that there was no use OF arguing the
question:: but ne accepted the invita-
ton. Then, with splendid optimism n
self-confdence III awaited developments
and inspiration. The dinner was TO
be on the sth. On the 1th Mr.. Blank
developed an excruciating headacne
and a pain in his chest. On h sth ne
felt too Ill to go to business. Evening
came. and III had no appetite. He sat
in the library, after dinner. and his
wife read Paracelsus to him until y
o'clock. when he felt drowsy. very
drowsy, and thought perhaps he would
better go to bed early. and see what a
long sleep would do Tor MIN. MIS-.
Blank approved the idea. He went TO
his room on the third floor She went
to hers on the second.
The coast was clear and everything
propitious; but the wretch had not
reckoned on the loving solicttude OF his
wife. She worried about him, ma,
about IL o'clock, was moved to see
whether he was able to sleep or was
wing awake and suffering. h tiptoed
L,softIy to his door and entered. The BED
was unrumpled. Mr.. Blank was not
there. Having drilled her MIND on
browning. Mrs. Blank was quite equal
to this simple problem. She remember
cd the date-the club dinner; and.c can
die in hand. she stalked sternly to the
telephone and called w the club.
us Mr.. Blank there?" she asked.
II don't know, madam; I'll see." re-
piled a boy in buttons. who forthwith
informed another boy that somebody
wife had I'm IL for him. Even across the
wires Mrs. Blanks on was unmls-
taxable. In a few moments the boy
returned to the telephone.
mo. ma'am. He amt here ne said
s~uayely. at the same time triumphantly
showing the other boy a crisp dollar Dill
IT think you are mistaken" said Mrs
Blank.
mo, ma'am. I asked everywhere"
and he hung up the receiver.
Five minutes later the bell rams vio-
lently.
lis Mr.. Blank there?"
mo. ma'am."
You go look again"
He went away and came c
c~huckling.
II amt here, ma'am."
Mrs. Blanks voice rose, and the wires
curled under IL.
Mr.. Blank Is there-at the dinner.
"Oh, no. ma'am."
AT say he Is You tell Mr.. Blank tha'
I know he is there. and that shall sta.
here and ring this bell until ne comes
to the telephone.
Once more the boy scurried on. Wher
he came back he was followed py !
sheepish- looking man In evening
Couldn't you do a~nythins7" asket
the man. desperately.
.No. sir. She said h wouldn'
Wei. here goes" Inc with a de
snairing groan Mr.. Blank stepped vi
, to the phone. 4.
Renewed tones. Then he braced him
self for the flood: but only one remarl
!, came sharply to his ears.
MAJ the Lord nave mercy on you
, soul"
He went back to the dinner. An ex
ira hour or two could make no diner
ence. Then he buttoned himself int
his coat. babe a touching farewell Z
; his friends. and started home.
The Lord may have mercy on me
but I know who won't" he said cole
fully. and since that evening fesuv
, circles have known him not. The PEI
, ting is in favor of his not turning u
, before Thanksgiving.