The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1898-05-30
EplsTLEs TO ST. PAUL.
EPIsTLEs TO ST. PAUL.

The horse had been newly clipped and was
evidently proud OF itself. It was pulling q
high wheeled affair which might readily have
been taken for juggernaut II it were not
occupied by maiden with NO other aim on
earth than to have her tailor-made effect
count for what 1t was worth. The equipage
passed down In front of Newspaper Row
and couple of messmates saw it.
"Ah,' said one that's queer oversight -
What's that?"
why they clipped the horse and banged
his tail, but they forgot to remember the
mane."
81 see that the committee on highways Of
the assembly has not made much progress
with that Dunno resolution" said Assembly
man Reardon.
What resolution was that" asked Alder
man Sheperd.
Why. don't you remember that at the
last meeting Of the assembly Billy Johnson
offered resolution directing the board Of
public works to take preliminary steps for
the relaying Of the hirsute on Horace DUNES
head? The committee is up against it be-
cause the repairs are to go on a down town
thoroughfare that is much used and nothing
but asphalt ought to go on there. The ad
jacent property owners will kick on the ex-
pense, of course but the work ought to be
done or the foundation will be gone. Now If
Bob Hare the board -" and then
Mr.. Shepard made his escape.
cts funny what an effect drinking has on
Bill Bikers eyes, said Martin. lone of them
takes on glossy look after he ticks up a
few beers.'
That's fact. cut in Fitz, GIVE noticed
it myself. Hot"
''You fellows don't appreciate the provisions
Of nature" remarked the scientist. That's
Bills spirit lamp
The people at the Windsor hotel remember
Miss Bell yet. She was the leading lady in
Mr.. Lifts big production of the "War of
Wealth." and when she walked out on an
aerial structure to give the villain of the
piece a chance to assassnate her they didn't
get the rescue party ready in time. and Miss
Bells internal economy received jar con-
seQuent upon a fall of thirty feet and the
alighting upon the naked boards. Miss Bell
was sent to the Windsor to stay until she
recovered. and she stayed there and ate ham
and eggs and other epicurian and fearsome
dishes for three months. Mr.. Lift order d
that no expense be spared-and there was no
sparing for she sued him for $4,000 as soon
as she got strong enough, and he settled for
81, 600. But that has nothing to do with the
story.
Miss Bell was an exceedingly dramatic
young woman, one of those persons who say
"Sir give me postage stamp" and things
like that. 1t is related of her that on one
occasion Col Monfort sent her up choice
bit of lunch-early fruits and things of that
kind 1t happened to be ten minutes before
the regular hour for luncheon, and she made
the waiter stand outside with the tray until
the hour had struck
One day IGhe gave a servant some cloths
for 1oIyn manfred tlGV
would be ready. The servant told her they
would be ready at noon on the second day
following
'Let them be here at 70 o'clock on Wednes-
day." said Miss Bell.
The time for the return Of the laundry
work came and passed. but the Clothes were
not returned. At ten minutes past IL M SIS
Bell rang for bell boy
'My Clothes" she said; "bring them to
me-" The boy went away and came back
presently.
'The clothes are not ready" he explained;
"you can Lave them tomorrow"
t'Bring them now she commanded. "They
were to be ready. 1 can brook no delays"
"But they are not washed" he persisted
"Fetch them" she sad; sit mattcrs not to
me what has been done. The time has
come"
Three minutes later two men carried tub
full of soapsuds and dirty clothes inso the
room and went out The Philistine.
n --
When Van came down Friday morning-of
course everybody knows Van-he got a note
from Postmaster Smith requiring him to at
once present himself at the pos.office and
take away his mail or be declared a nuisance.
Van cut out few editorials and pasted
them up and then concluded that it might be
as we'll to send that boy who was making the
doiJ, 70 ha sent
him. Presently the boy came back and made
humble request that there be a dray sent
in the place Of him, for the mail matter was
more than he could bear, or something like
that. Then Col Vandiver sent dray and he
presently got his mail.
He had forgotten the fact that he had sub
scribed to the curative qualities of Gimcarts
indigestion poultices. But the public had not
forgotten the picture they had been requested
to look upon. and some members of that same
public had made comments
1t seems that the medicine that had been
boosted by the colonel had to do with dys-
pepsia, and the first correction that came to
hand inquired if he had not subscribed to
the wrong sort Of dope.
One writer said: why do you complain
that you could not eat without getting that
full feeling?"
Another asked what indigestion had to do
with mans looks: A third unfeelng wretch
desired to be informed if that full feeling was
in any way related to that tired feeling, and
another communication, from an unmarried
lady, sought information as to whether he
was as handsome as his picture made him.
Van went through a good deal of the matter
and then sent for the porter and had the mail
taken down to the engine room and fed to the
flames. Said he:
Hereafter it will be different. If I have
leg and get cured of dyspepsia
won't mind telling about it, but l hope
may die if 1 ever get into the dyspepsia game
again. If my stomach has no more standing
in this community than has the dog that runs
the street, then what is the use of a man
spending all his life trying to build up
reputation to prove that he is all right so
far as his innards are concerned?"
How Sea-POyver Counts.
From the Philadelphia Press
Was there ever a more significant vindica-
ton of sea power?
This country of 7O,COoC0O, with unexamplei
resources. was about to occupy Cuba last
week in overwhelming forces. Suddenly four