Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1898-10-14
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poor woman whose arm had been &C.
verely bitten. AS he was dressing the
wound he said: II cannot make out
what sort of n creature bit you. This
is too small for a horses bite and too
large for a dogs" ooh, sir" replied
the patient, ''it wasn't an animal, 1t
was another lydy."
DIR. o Rokitansky. of Gratz, who
has just died, was a son of the cele-
brated Vienncse professor, Rokitansky.
The latter had four sons, of whom two
devoted themselves to medicine, while
the other two became singers and the
old man used to say, when asked what
their professions We're: "Zwel heulen
und zwei heilen"-"Two arc howlers
and two are %healers."
The late Professor COIN, the famous
botanist of Breslau, thus opened his
course Of lectures OH botany: 1.-THE four
chief constituents of plants are: Car
bon. G; Oxygen, o; Hydrogen, H; and
Nitrogen, n" Then writing down these
four letters, with apparent carelessness,
on the blackboard-COHN-he smiled,
observing: ut is clear l ought to know
something about botany"
w. S. Gilbert, the English dramatist,
was lunching not long ago at a country
hotel, when he found himself in COM
pany with three cycling clergymen, by
whom he IA drawn into conversation.
When they discovered who he was one
of the party asked Mr.. Gilbert how he
felt "in such n grave and reverend
company." II feel" said Mr.. Gilbert,
like a lion in n den of Daniels"
DIR. Evans, n member of Parliament
ut Melbourne, was an old man, and the
other members jokingly spoke Of him
as belonging to the era of Queen Anne.
Once, while making q speech. he re-
ferred to Queen Anne. and was greeted
with cries of Did you know her?"
"What was she like:' "Yes. sir" re-
torted the doctor. II did know her. The
scholar is contemporary With all time"
A. wealthy German of Tangier has
purchased a number of plots Of land in
the town from the Moors. "Your gar
dens are pretty, but scattered" re-
marked an Englislman to him recently.
"Yes," he replied; they happen to be
on the sites of the forts which Eng
land must build when she occupies Tan
gier. England will pay me for my
pretty gardens. I return to the father
land comfortably Fortunate"
AT the great meeting in st. James's
Hall in the summer of 1856, to protest
against the disestablishmcnt of the
Irish Church, some Orange enthusiast,
in the hope of disturbing Bishop Will
berforce, kept interrupting his honeyed
eloquence with inopportune shouts of
"Speak up, my lord!' II am already
speaking up" replied the bishop in
his most dulcet tone; 81 always speak
up, and I decline to speak down on the
level of the ill-lnannered person in the
gallery"
Coleridge, who was an awkward
horseman, was one day riding along
the turnpike road in the county of Dur
ham, when n wag who met him drew
rein and said in an impertinent drawl:
'My graceful friend. did you happen
to meet q tailor on the road?" I'm in
clined to think I did," said Coleridge,
meditatively; II was not sure at the
moment, but he said something about
my meeting n goose farther along the
road" The wag put spurs to his horse,
and the poet logged calmly on his a
When the Duke of Wellington was co.
operating with the Spanish army in the
Peninsula against Napoleon, he was
DESTROYS on one occasion, during q gen.
eral engagement, that the general COM
handing the Spanish contingent should
execute a certain movement on the
field. He communicated the wish to
the Spaniard personally, and was some
what taken aback to be told that the
honor of the king of Spain and his
army would compel a refusal of the re-
quest unless Wellington, as a foreign
officer, g%raciously permitted to exist
and fight ON Spanish soil, should pre-
sent the petition on his knees. The old
duke often used to tell the story after
ward. and he would say: "Now, 1 was
extremely anxious to have the move
ment executed, and I didn't care a
twopenny damn about getting on my
knees. so down I plumped"
A number of years ago Schley was in
command Of one of the old navy shfps
that vas fitting out ut the Brooklyn
Navy Yard for a foreign cruise. A few
days before Schley's ship was to sail
a big party of Brooklyn Sunday-school
teachers visited the ship in a body. The
crew were engaged in slowing and
breaking out stores. On the main deck
stood u big hogshead packed full Of
b~eer-bottles that had been emptied.
AS the bottles stuck out of the packing
straw there was NO way of telling
whether they were filled OF empty. The
Sunday-school teachers held a confer
ence " that hogshead, and deter.
mined to send an emissary to the skip.
per about 1t. Schley received the ennis
sary in his cabin. "Sir," said the mes
senger, at is regrettable to observe the
huge quantity of liquid intoxicants
your vessel is receiving" "How's
that?" Sclley inquired. The emissary
told about the enormous hogshead filled