Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1898-12-08
AUCTION SALE COMEDY,
HOW THE TRICK OF WAKING ONE
BID AGAINST SELF is WORKED,

5
The vase was about eighteen inches
high, and of varying diameter. It
was OF some sort of crockery or china
ware, and it was as ornate as Lone
somehurst cottage. On one side was
a Watteau young woman, clad in a
truly rural pink satin puffy skirt.
mostly all pleats, and an appie-green
bodice, also satin, and shepherd
ess" hat that must have cost at least
$24. so, and white silk stockings that
ended in pink satin slippers (high
heeled), apparently No. 12, children's
size. The young woman was engaged
in holding on to the kind of shepherd
ess' crook that shepherdesses used al
ways to carry in the old days-gilded,
and with varihued liberty silk rib
bons tied all over it. She was also
iudustriously engaged in gazing into
the branches of sapphire blue cherry
tree, wherein o very red and very
spankable Cupid was doing the usual
act with bow and arrow. On the
other side young man, with more or
less OF the same makeup, without the
skirt, was climbing gilt ladder into
a gilt balcony shaded by Tyrian pur-
pie vines.
he auctioneer held it up.
What am I offered for this real
thing?" he inquired, insipuatingly.
'Ladies and gentlemen, the age of
this vawse is beyond my humble COM
putation. Moreover, do not like to
go beyond facts that 1 know. L do
know that this vawse adorned the
home of the Russian Minister-Cacky
-'Cackyowsky- something like that
to this country seventy-two years
ago. II passed from his unwilling
keeping, when he was recalled, to the
household establishment CT the Gear.
The many vicissitudes through which
this vawse has passed in finally reach
ing my humble but reverent hands,
ladies and gentlemen, were too pa
thetic to relate. It suffices to say
that it is gem Git to have adorned
Versailles-as, indeed, who shall say
that it never did adorn Versailles?
Ladies and gentlemen, I ask you to
make me an offering for this vawse,
keeping in mind"
"Two dollars" said a coarse, brutal
man at the far end of the room.
The auctioneer looked grieved.
Surely" said he, ''you jest.
Surely, you must be unaware of the
merits of the cherished school of cera-
mic art to which this"
1.-TWO N a hail." put in another low
churl, with business-like eye, up
near the auctioneer's stand.
81 perceive" said the anctioneer,
sadly, 'that spirit of merriment
pervades the room this morning. 1t
is sorry enough reflection that a
gem, a prize, of this character, ladies
and gentlemen, that generation ago
would have been grabbed at by"
"Well, call i. three" said the first
man to make bid.
"My friends" said the auctioneer,
shaking his head mournfully, ''are
you aware that it is among the possi-
bilities-indeed, among the probabili-
ties-that this vawse for which you
now offer me such paltry sums may at
one time have embellished the bou-
doirs of queens?-that the Inflated
Marie Antoinetto herself"
"Three fifty" said another man
with low forehead but bright, alert
eye.
1t was at this point that the deter
elderly woman, with
the poppy-covered bonnet and the fat,
old-fashioned purse, walked in. The
love of tradition shone in her eyes,
and she flashed look of contempt at
the bidders.
Give dollars" said she, pushing
the crowd oloso to tee auc-
tioneer's stand.
"Ah, madame" "said the auctioneer,
"you have arrive in season. It is
readily to be seel thai you know a
good thing when that you have
a cultivated eye, thu is to say, for
such perfect products of sadly de-
Perforated art as this. Yet I fear you,
too, strike too low note. Five / am
then. is to make it
ten? who makes it ten?-ah, ten am
Nobody in the room had spoken.
The determined-looking elderly wom-
an looked around defantly and ad-
justed her spectac!es defans.y.
ten am offered-who makes
it fifteen?-"
"Fifteen dollars" said the deter
woman, and all of the
rest Of the rooms assemblage looked
On with very great silence.
Fifteen am offered-it is dreary
enough to reflect upon it-but fifteen
I am observation-disclosures,
who is to display his acumen and make
twenty"
Nobody in the room had spoken.
Twenty five dollars" said the de-
termined-looking woman, and she
didn't notice the grins of the canaills
about her.
"An9 sold to this lady with the cul-
tivated eye for twenty-five dollars"
said the auctioneer, snappingly.
"Oh, yes" said the auctioneer in an
easy whisper to friend, "when YOU
can get 'em to bid against themselves