The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1898-08-12
UNCLE JOE'S PLEDGE.

county, is dead" said John Gilbert. the trav
cling groceryman, "and that reminds me
that he never broke the pledge that he made
more than 20 years ago. Uncle Joe Sheester
was a jolly old Pennsylvania Dutch farmer,
and he had been for 40 years or more con.
spicuous as citizen through his perennial
| conviviality.
'There were few nights in the week when
Joe's faithful bay mare Betsey could not be
seen tied to the tavern hitching post in the
village near which his farm lay, waiting pa
tiently for the coming of her master, when
his ibations, shared by an always willing
collection of loungers in the barroom, had
produced certain condition of booziness in
| Uncle Joe that made him no longer agree
able or profitable company. At this stage he
was always conducted to his horse and
helped upon her back. Uncle Joe never had
much control Of his physical or mental facu-
ties at such times, 80 long as he was afoot,
but the moment he was in the saddle upon
Betsey's back he would straighten up like a
major. As soon as he was well settled in the
saddle and the reins were in his hands his
mare would be off like a shot, and she in.
variably delivered Joe safe at his farmhouse
door,
when Uncle Joe arrived et that particu-
lar degree of stupidity in his cups the boys
were in the habit OF playing all sorts of tricks
and jokes on him, the general obliquity of his
discernment making him an easy and credu-
lous victim. Joe paid but small heed to his
surroundings at such times. In one of the
villages in that neighborhood there was
man-and he's there yet, guess-who had a
remarkable genius for carving and modelling
effigies Of animals In wood. He once carved
i wooden dog for patron and had placed it
on the sidewalk outside his shop to give pass.
ers-by the privilege of admiring the work of
art. So natural in pose was the figure. and
SO true to life, that vagrant and scrapny
coach dog that came along soon afterward
stopped in front of the wooden dog. bristed
up and growled, end then pitched into the
mock dog with Eavugeness and earnestness
that left no doubt in the minds of those who
witnessed the assault that the coach dog
was deceived by the cunning of the artist
into believing the wooden dog real one.
The coach dog did not discover its error un.
til it had wiped up the sidewalk with the
image several times and knocked it's legs off,
Then the real dog dropped the wooden dog,
gaZcd second or SO at the shattered ruins
with staring eyes, and then sneaked away
with its tail between its legs, about the most
ashamed and sheepsh-looking dog that ever
found itself detected in foolish business
This artist in wood carving got an order
from Reading harnessmaker one time,
about 20 years ago, to chop out q life-sized
bay horse, which the merchant wanted as a
sign in front of his store The horse was to
be built standing at rest, in an easy, horse.
like pose and to be mounted on four large,
easy running casters, so that it could be
moved in and out Of the store with the least
possible amount of wear and tear on the
clerk. This order was executed TO the let
ter, and in manner that excited the won
DER and admiration of all who saw it. 1t
was so natural, some one declared. that il
the wooden horse neighed it wouldn't have
aprprised anyone.
about that time Unce Joe Sheester tied
his old mare Betsey at the tavern hitching
post one evening and took his usual place in
the barroom to WOO conviviality. While he
was thus engaged some of the boys were
seized with an idea that they thought had
promise of particularly brilliant results, and
they Immediately proceeded to carry it out
They surrcptitious!y removed the wooden
horse from the she'd put saddle and bride
on it, led Betsey to the shed and shut her in
and tied the counterfeit prcsentment of a
horse to the tavern hitching post. The night
was dark. About ten O'Clock Uncle Joe
came out of the tavern with a large cargo
aboard. Some of the boys helped him on the
horse, united the halter as they always did
with Betsey, and put the reins in Joe's
hands. Joe had submitted to all this me-
chemically, as was his habit, but when he
Strengthened up in the saddle, and Betsey
did not dash away, he sat a moment speech
less with astonishment and then slapping
his leg with one hand exclaimed, in tone OF
maudlin despair:
my alt petsey ISIS pally NIT me, py
shing!
Wait, Uncle Joe,' said one of the jokers.
I'll lead Betscy ways, then she'll 60 all
right
"Fhe road from the tavern was wide and
smooth, and had steep, straight descent
just beyond the tavern of 200 feet or more.
At the bottom of the hill was a level stretch
of few yards, when the road raised another
hill to the level country beyond. The wood.
en- horse was pulled along until il was well
started down the hill and then left to ITSELF
1t kept right on and as it increased its speed
Uncle Joe gave a whoop of delight. Two
OF three of the boys ran after the horse to
note the climax of the joke and its effect on
Uncle Joe. The wooden horse on wheels
sped down the steep, hard hill, scooted
across the level space at the bottom, and
started up the ascent ON the other side.
There its speed, of course, soon decreased,
and the horse at last came to standstill.
just q moment it was quiescent, and then
began backing down the hill and stopped on
the level at the bottom. 1t was plain that
Uncle Joe was dumbfounded He sat still l
moment in the saddle, and then scrambled to
the ground. He passed his hands up and
down the horses legs, and then exclaimed:
She ISIS tet! My alt Petsey ISIS tet, shift
und shtrait in her shoes. yet! Udderwioe.
de witches has her, alretty!'
"Joe's alarm over the strange situation |
sobered him up somewhat. He started back
toward the tavern. Anticipating this, the
jokers had removed Betsey to her place at
the hitching post. Presently Uncle Joe ap
peared there, putting from his hard pull up
the hill. Before he could report his astound
ing discovery Betsey greeted him with a
whinny of recognition. Joe stopped short,
and for full minute stared at the mare with
bullying eyes, while she stamped impatently.
Then he sank down on the tavern steps and
threw his hands in the air.
My alt Petscy shift set in te boiler, al:
retty,' Ire moaned, 5'unt my alt Petsey allie
unit vinnerin' here on tie hill, yit! Tie witches
sure haas my alt Petsey'
while Uncle Joe was bemoaning the pos.
session of his mare by witches the jokers ar
rived with the wooden horse from the hol. |
low. As it was run up in front of the tavern |
one of the boys said:
81 knew that wooden horse was as natural |
as life, but ] didn't think it was natural |
10