Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1898-05-12
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Illt. TrXs
Iienrcck- have trouble, : ~
Mrs. llcnpeck- But you ara @ ~ n,
OF my woes. Henpeck. w. ~
Star ~
~rhc doctor would like to ). ~
side, -aid the maid to tho s,s' 1
reception room. Not mue lug lsGs
startled patient; "he cant ).
Ray on mo Yonkers st.,. SaHM
Nodd My wife told me NJ -
peace with her, would h,r,.
from my club. Todd-ADd II
getting along all right now, warf
Oh, yes. I'm living at the Oh, le Is
Il I"ar that the crowd ass, en a
when you appeared at tba b. les'
Opera House" False me- hs nese
replied tie eminent rrocs5,' lll's
Barn,- ToiTcr; AL false n 81 ,
no crowd. Indianapolis JOpr' J. ~ n
"nH you hear of the acclds,, ble.
hcfcll you lrother?" "Accld,. n
Not Stliods, | hope" "WsN (und
IN idca struck him, and now N 81
upper pant Of his head is psnr log
New York Herald. 4,
Mr. IsaacS l sells you dot r., pee
grad sacrifice. Customer-Bu, cts
that Of All your goods. How :
make a livinGE Mr.. Isaacs-yeh, E9
makes a small profit on de M, =
string. Now York Weekly. 8
"Wlat Intensely red hair tlst
man has" exclaimed Maud: II
priscd That you seem to lks
we'll oh" replied Mamie ! =
like him yery well. never hi, +,
to anything put pink teas."-Vs
ton Star.
Gargoylo back in town after, S'S
absencpl-When | went awsy
and Brown were rival suitos b ~
TWitter's hand. Which proved "
the lucky man? Glanders-C.1 =,
that yet. She married Brow :, :,
month ago. Ask Inc again ID X
year.-Life.
FNck-Call him a musician. VI, y
doesn't know tie difference b1] hi
noctulnc and SYMPHONY. n \.
You don't mean it? And they n, ,
get away from one another n 4,
terribly afraid that the other vi
by the way, what is the dltfeN E
Boston Transcript.
NO. ma'am said Meanderig
I'm sorry, hut it's ag'in my Tf1
! can't split no wood Well d
fWered. there will be a load 4
mere this afternoon, and" II
ry ag'in; but can't carry no Oa
I'll tell YOU what | will do-Tlcl
mise. IF you've got a gas-slN|
turn on the gas. WashingtOnS
Here. you've been telling
along" said the bright-facel
wife, what wonderful COOK
mother was: and now your Aun'
has just told me that your fatAs
a chronic dyspeptic.' well, yG
the young husband murmured,
deep sigh. mother learned by "a
ing on father. "-Cleveland Plain
er.
THAT young man of yours sol
Observing parent. as his daughteI
down to breakfast. should apl
a job in "A dime museum "Wly
en-" exclaimed the young lady, in
of Indignation, what do you ns
Il noticed. when passed throus
hall late last night" answered Tx
man, that he had two heads uF'
shoulders. "-Chicaco News.
Foster-So her father refused toa
sent TO Your marriage with bis da'
ter? NiGlin-No. that's just the q
Of il. He gave me no answer WIZ
told him What had called for, and
me if didn't leave in less tlan
seconds. he'd kick me out WhalsW
do,,c with a fellow who will val
off in that way from the sub]eclu1
cussion ?-Hoston Transcript
Mrs. Gree ne-My husband SN'
thorcl tful mn, He Always
Gown ilLo the basement Kitchen
smoke. Mrs. Gray-And lets tleS
come upstairs into the dlnns
through the dumb waiter. MIS- u'
Yes. Lat that's because he Is a's
minded. loor man. That has n"l
to do with his thoughtfulness
Boston TRANSCRIPT.
Attorney-You say you had cala
see Miss Billings and was al lle "
at the time the burglary was cVu-
ted: Nitness-Yes, sir. A''uDe|
Then how did it happen tnat "NsI
prisoner dashed into the room an'
saulted YOU. you leaped throusn
window and vert home hlaA'ns ,ra
tempt to dcfenu' the lady or sns
alarm? Witncss-l thought II vas
father.-Life.
MY FRIEND" said the kindly olu 'r
tleman who likes to MAKE a'g y,
ances while travelling. you sllo'', +,
low ny example. | strive " )" ,
something new every day. ~"
the answer Of the quiet !ouhs ia,
that may do in your line OF u 'n. i
but if YOU were doing vau''e'n .aon
with me. you'd realize that auu
seem disappointed if they WV ,o
what they have been taught 'O'Af
Washington Star.