Daily camera., 1898-08-20
IF THEY WERE IN CHARGE.
other How to Manage
the War.


Napoleon wasn't much of warrior
after all. The story of his wonderful
military genius occupies several vol
umes in history, but it is evident that
he would be a very common and ordi-
nary soldier if he were living to-day.
All of these strong and revolutionary
statements are made after stroll
through Fort Mcpherson reservation,
where there are 1850 embryo generals
and war heroes.
The luster on the glorious war rec
ords Of every great general who has
lived and died is dimmed in the at
mosphere of Fort Mcpherson, where
so much greatness lies loose and rest
less. None of the famous military
strategists who have won fame could
plan, battles and accomplish brilliant
victories so well as do these raw re-
cruits at the fort, who are just simply
itching "ter git at EN-
They seem to have been born gener
als-these recruits at the fort. One
is led to believe after listening to them
that this great government is making
mistake by sending Miles, Shafter,
Brooke and others to lead the great
armies. The recruits themselves do
not doubt that mistake has been
made. They say that Gen. Miles
should be on sentry duty at Fort Nc
Pherson; that he is entirely out of his
sphere when in command of the army
"W'y, if old Miles had er been ftten
fer to command, he'd er licked them
air Spaniards long ago." said one long,
gangling recruit the other day. This
critic of Miles was sitting on the fence
of the reservation, nibbling at an ice
cream cake and licking it's paper wrap
per to be sure that none of the rapidly
melting cream escaped. He thrust his
left leg through the interval between
the planks of the fence and strength
ened by this new hold on the fence
he continues:
"Col. Miles amt no more ftten to be
commander of this yere army than
that ere feller over there 'thout any
shirt on" designating recruit who
was attired in ragged striped trousers,
rolled up above his knees.
81 jest wish l had ter run this war"
struck in greasy-looking soldier
whose sole uniform consisted of
campaign hat. He also wore an un-
dershirt and the relics of pair of last
years trousers.
"Lemme tell yer, boys" he contin-
ued, 1.-The right kind of er way to er
walloped them Spaniards wuz ter went
straight across to Hayanny and blow
up Moro castle the first thing. Then
after smashing Gen. Weyler's board
ing house I'd gin them fellers lessin'
in fightin'.
"Now, I jest know as how I could er
took regiment er you boys and er
sent ther whole Spanish army er hump
in'."
"Ah, git out, yer don't know whut
you're talkin' bout" snarled a recruit
with a large ginger cake in his hand.
He took large swipe at the cake with
his mouth and continued in a muffled
tone, caused by an overclogging of the
gingerbread: IF you wuz to go over
there to blow up Morrer castle you'd
git blowed up higher'n that ere flag
pole. wy amt you got sense ernuff
to know that ther 'arbor down there
in Cuba is packed full er torpedoes an
mines ser thick that ther fish has to
90 outside ter swim?
"Ther onlyest woy to git Cuba is to
starve old Blanco. Now, if wuz in old
McKinley's place I'd jest take all er
these here volunteers and regulars
and git out erbout 40 miles this side Nv
Havana; then I'd march right down to
ther back side er town and pitch camp.
Every time a market wagon 'ud come
along I'd jest stop it and take all the
vegetables. Then I'd send the empty
wagon on to Blanco to let him know
that l meant business. 1 Wouldn't let
a single dairy wagon go in that blasted
town, and it wouldn't take me two
weeks to make old Blanco wish be had
good supply of hardtack. It's all bosh
to be blockadin' aroun' on the lake side
of Havana. Them fellers is too sharp
for old Admiral Watson, and they can
git all the grub they want. My plan
is ter starye 'emN by putting soldiers
on ther back side er the city,
The plan met with flood of disap-
proval. Howls of condemnation of the
starvation plan arose on every side,
but the would-be conqueror munched
his ginger-cake undisturbed in his con-
fdence in his own ability to crush the
Spanish.
'Derned if see any militerry erbil-
ity in sittin' down by Havana and wait
ing fur the people ter die. I say,
gimme blood. The way ter end this
here war is ter go at 'em with er rush
and bayonet the whole skeedattlin'
that amt kilt at the first shot," fired
in young man who looked very meek
in all respects except his mouth.
This warlike declaration was re-
ceived with cheers, and half a hundred
recruits protested that this was the
only way to capture Spain.
ST wish Col Cook md gimme a chance