Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1898-09-25
, philosopher ON GUARD.
Gives His Views on Camp Duty an"
the War.

strolled up 20 the noble guardsman'
who was YEARLY plodding his beat with
his gun. see-sawing his shoulder His
sergeant had evidently been a little pre-
mature in detailing him. as evidently ne
had lust como from the backwoods OF
Virginia. having the regulation long arms
big, front teeth, and heavy, hrm-set jaws
pf these noble scions.
.eWen, how do you like guard duty?" l
asked. ~
In the customary drawl he then launch
ed OUT
"Waal don't like totin' dis gun up and
down here so much fer nothin'. Reckon
day want me ter be a sort or skeer-croW
here Ef | had my way l wouldn't make
fellers stay out here in the rain ana not
sun. I would lis put up lot OF skeer-
crows In sojir clos all-round mere IKE
we do on dc farm. and let de men stay
in dere tents. Ef dey would give me
horse and plow and let me work up els
eroun' bout here, 'twold suit my tralnlh
better could have ploughed 1t up
wild de 'bennet' on dis gun by now. DIS
g. too much like chopin black gum
wild a sledge. When l wuk likes ter see
de chips Nv Den dey say i got ter walk
IN and down here ter night. l Jis wanter
saw I'm ulster goin' ter bed wild de chick
Ans and never KEEP my eyes open
a. night befo'. 'cepin' at shindig or
coon hunt. Think I'll mention TO de mann
man de visibility OF putin bob-wlre
fence round here wild sign, mo loaters
; or hobos lowed" an tie bulldogs all
round de plantation. never was no
hand ter hang round one place, nohow'
When / fined dis army it was ter hght.
not ter keep pokin up an down mere al
Gay an night wild sorter caAe-"aiA Oh
myself.
PRESENT ARMS no HIM.
''Dem big striped-leg cap'ns worry me
noren all de oder brass buttons Dat one
YOU see ober yonder laughin' had de gnu
,er ask me ter present desc here arms ter
him. 1 tole him not on his me- ne 'ole
me Tor come ter o port when talkin' ter
CIV one / tote him I didn't know whar
=. mort was. lie den asst me If l knoWed
nv Central Orders, an when tole HIM 1
badn, cot 'auainted wild any OF de generals
vet he laughed so IN my face dat come
nteb Iambastin' him wild de butt OF dis
- s'nose dey are de oberSeers OF
dcsa dieeers. but dey needn't think dat
ah'rv teller whar comes from de country is
q guy. RE asst me what was de extent NV
my pos. an l tole him l dunno; ana no
pos long here cep'n pine stumps.
"Dey don't manage war 'cordin' Ter my.
notions. How in de name o Jim Henry
do dey speck US ter whip anybody stayin
here when de Spanyons am way cross DE
scar / specked ter be turned loose on
dem soon as / got here. an was Jes'
goin' ter make de fur fly. l imagine Wild
dis here shootin' iron could pick seen
lieht-hole in q man dat he wouldn' nave
tor turn his head ter see what's behind
him, an wild dis tater-dgger ! could do
some pow'fnl scratcnin'.".
THE COON IN THE TRAP.
But, old man. peace has been given U.S.
nov, and don't think you VIII ever have
an opportunity % use them.' l ventured.
"Aaa an Il mought NV been 'clared
fore de war was fer all we have dope.
II minds me NV a coon hunt what / went
on W ia ole Bear creek. De dogs got
way head NV de rest NV us. an tr@sd dc
coon. Some fool had sot "A trap at d&foo.
or de tree, an dc coon run down right
IN DE trap so dat he couldn't fight, an
when We got dar all de dogs had pounced