The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1898-12-09
w. C. U. COLUMN N.
CONDUCTED BY MRS. NJ. l.. HOBBS.
Hans Schneider Tells How II Has Helped
Saloon Business.

abDudt What a fine ding dis var ha-
bin for our fellers { | meen us saloon
geepers). Yust when dose fanateek
brohibeeshunists begin to unide deli
forces agin und forgit aboLdt gold
und silver, und dalk like der boys
we're of more inheritance dan dat
money question, den dis var comes
Iup to uccupy der addeunshun.
"It is an i'll Wind dot nobody
good" folks say, and yu can bet
our fellers be sharp enuff to dake
advantage of emmy ding vat comes
our way. Yu bin dalking aboudt
10000 boys dot We want to dake der
blaze of der drunkards dot die in a
year. Veil sum of us really began
to dink dot maybe der dime was
neer by ven We Good not git so many
Aber der brewers found oudt a
sure way to git dem und lots more /;
und it vas slick way, too; such a
way dot der dembrans kranks Good
not de- eat. Oh, but uor fellars are
wise Dey yust shtarted saloons
right in der camps of der soldiers,
und make it seem deir duty to buy
beer, SO as to furnish nice dings for
der sick vnns. And dey even git
der soldiers to tend bari Sum
dimes dose who we're members OF
der churches und Sunday schools
und Christian associashuns at home,
we're detailed to sell beer in the camp
saloons. Den to make it seem not
so bad for dem fellers dose saloons
were called canteens. Dot also fool
ed lots of folks at home, for dey did
not know at first dat dey were sa-
looms. Veil, next ding der water
vas bad, und der soldiers had to
have sumding to drink dot wood
taste good und wood not make dem
have dyphoid fever and such dings.
OF course not all dose soldiers will
drink beer, neejer be all of dem
boys, aber dere will be enuff of dem
drinking at home to make up der
difference.
1t be true dot der dembrans
cranks und der mudders und sum
ladders und breechers hav bin dry.
ing to git der saloons in de army
aber dey will have deir
balns. 1t yust make me laugh all
over inside to hear dose beeples
dalk aboudt Citing president Me-
X inley to shtop de army canteens.
L. He owns a share in dot opera
house at Canton und it has a saloon
in it What he (oder his wife, vich is
der same ding,) gifts rent for, and
so.of course he is in SYMPATHY NIT
our business.
2. He wants to be elekted bresi-
dent agin, und he knows he Good
not be if he dared 10 shtop our fell
ers from running them canteens.
3. He is not his own boss, aber
he is bossed by der bolitishuus,
ind dey will never let him shtop
der canteens.
4. Der government is in bartner-
ship nit our fellers in der business.
It not only gives der license to sell,
lber it gifts two tollars on every bar
rel of beer dot is sold emmy where,
20 if he wood shtop der canteens he
,ood dake a great bile of money q
,udt Of der pocket of Unkle Sam. |
SO yu see Why it makes me laff t
I'll over to hear dose preachers und I
ranks dalk aboudt Citing up great
ong betishuns to Mr.. Mckinley
gainst der canteens. 1t gives dem
}leasure to dink dey are doing sum g
lings, und it don't do us ennyIt
larm, for We knows he will pay no r
ddenshun to their betishuns. For Z
hy? He knows dot dose preachers n
ill vote for him der next chance
ley git, for dey dink he is good
member of der church, und it is an $
lonor to der churches to have him ?
Or a president und he knows dot i
ur fellers will not vote for him If I
le NEEDLES NIT our business; need "
II will We let de fellers dot We con- I
rol vote for him und he can never
,e president agin.
Annudder ding dis var is doing {
or our fellers. 1t lie opening up
Trade for us in der PHILIPPINE Is Z
ands und udder blaces; for where
.ver der star sbangled banner goes,
lere der blessings Of our bizness will {
20 too; for it is Unkle Sans biz
ness as veil as ours, und it is to his
nderest to exdend it as much as
possible.
Idll yu our brosbects are bright
Every where. Nobody is hurting us