The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1898-03-06
NOVEL CURE ron APPENDICITIS.
The Way One Doctor Earned Fame
and POcISeted "a Fat Fee.


had lately moved here from the West
'Why, I left behind me a reputation as
an appendicitis expert that would pe
worth twenty thousand a year In Chlca-
CO."
What's your percentage of cures?"
asked the recently graduated NJ d.
Just an even hundred per cent"
what are you giving me? There isn't
a surgeon in the country who's never lost
a case. why even"
Yes; but l don't use the knife" said
the other doctor interruptng.
Medical treatment. eh? Wen. I don't
hold much with that 1t only alleviates
Doesn't cure. What's your method; oil?'
mo Just water"
"Hydropathic treatment for appendici-
It's! You must be crazy"
who said anything about hydropathIo
treatment? You hospital youngsters al
ways want to build up a four-story name
Tor everything, so as to charge more in
the bill, | reckon. I'm telling you that
We saved 100 per cent. of my appendi-
citis cases by the use of water; and now
II you'll give me a chance, I'll tell you
how l did 1t, but | wouldn't advise you
to follow my method. 1 don't follow 1t
myself"
Fire ahead" said the young doctor.
ITO begin with the truth. nv 100 per
cent. consisted of one patient. Append
citis hasn't got fashionable out our way
yet. Few people know about il, and, in
my opinion, It's one of those diseases you
don't get until you get thinking about
them"
The young doctor looked wise "Invol-
untary muscular action due to cere-"
as IL X,,sz
TN furnish all the necessary foot notes
myself This patient of mine was a chan
named Dunby, "a big, robust fellow, a
great eater, and too lazy to take exercise.
Consequently his stomach was always
troubling him. Wen, one day he got hold
of semi-medical paper containing a long
and grewsome article on appendicitis That
was the first intimation he had that he
was the proud possessor of vermiform
appendix. As soon as he discovered il, II
began to bother him. He kept poking and
prodding himself to see If he had any pains
there, and naturally he made himself sore.
One day he came down TO my office white
as a sheet
I've got it, Doc he said; I've got IT.
81 Got what? l asked
Appendicitis. l can feel It swelling
up. 1t must be a lemon seed or something.
though I've been careful not to swallow
anything OF that sort.
you've got stomach ache, and that s
ALL, 1 said
'Stomach-achel Oh, II you could feel
it? I'm dead man.
You're blooming fool said, and
you'll be dead fool II you scare yourself
into it, Lie down here and let me look
you over
THE result of my examination was such
as to assure me that Dunby was suffering
from a bad fit of indigestion and scare
combined. l tried to get him to look at It
that way, but he wouldn't have 1t. That
Internal medical article was firmly fixed
in his appendix veriformis, and though
was satisfied there was nothing else there
he was likely to die Of it. got him home
and returned to my office to smoke a pipe
over the problem, promising to return that
evening. When / got back there was a
little blue mark on his abdomen.
Modification, moaned Dunby
"As matter of fact It was simply a
slight bruise caused by his continual prod
ding at himself; but / had formed my plan
and proceeded TO act upon 1t.
You were right Dunby,' / said. 1T is
appendicitis That mark shows it,
oh, my GodP he cried. Send for my
brother l want TO see my nearest rela-
tive before die.
You aren't going to die said.
You're going to be cured this very night
How's the paln?'
Gone Numbness of approaching
death he gurgled
Keep your nerve up / told him. Then
/ went 10 a carpenter and had him set In
a sort of reversed stocks over Dunby's
bathtub, like the kind they used TO set
| malefactors in, only they were contrived
so that the man should be held upside
! down and they were padded to prevent
| his ankles from being hurt. When they
| were finished / made Dunby drink water
| until his eyes bulged out.
| If you drink a lot of water explain
| ed to him, It will wash the foreign mat
ter out of the appendix as soon as that
| organ is reversed. Swallow every drop
you can get down.
when Dunby had drunk till he was
puffed like a pouter pigeon my assistant
| and / took him and hung him up by the
feet over the bathtub. IL was a very
hard job, too for he was heavy. Three
times we filed him up and three times
we hung him up and made an inverted
roaring cataract out Of him. 1t was pretty
| tough treatment, but the moral effect was
! grand. AS soon as he was able to talk
! he assured me that he was washed our
| clear to the tips of his toes. Certainly
| no man ever got more thorough inter-
nal bath Just to make sure / turned on
| him a fake x-ray, and told him the ap-
| pendx was clear
Now said /, all you've got to do is
! to be careful. Take plenty of exercise,
don't overeat and don't worry. Wen
| leave the carpenters work there in case
you have another attack
IF you'll believe 1t, the first thing Dun
by did as soon as he was well enough TO
| get around was TO get an ak and knock
| the stocks contrvance to flinders. Such
| is the ungratefulness Of man. But he
| sent me a check that 1 was almost asham-
| ed to take, and talked about my wonder
| full skill until / was afraid of being heId
up to the contempt of the profession as
an advertiser. My reputation was made.
| But / don't expect TO adopt that treat
ment here, and / shouldn't recommend
you to try It In a case Of the real thing"
NO; I'm not likely to-" said the hospi-
tai doctor. "Of course, need hardly tell
you that the case you cite is one Of hys.
| terical involuntary muscul--"
IL don't think you need" replied the
other dryly IF I'd told my patient thar,
the undertaken, not !, would have had
mis- money. IT don't always pay to call
a spade a spade when it's a double-bar-
relied Iatn-named spade. You might
write that in the front Of your notebook
| Yes; you're welcome"