The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1898-06-30
Sforyeffes.
BY CASEY.
BY CASEY.


fleet first appeared outside of Santiago
the Spanish soldiers believed that Ad-
miral Cervera was only waiting for
sufficient number of the warships of
the yankee pigs to get around there
to sail out and capture or destroy the
flower of the American navy. Thus
the officers would often sit down and
figure out how much their share of the
prize money would be for each one of
the Yankee battleships, and also the
territory they would apply for when
the United States were captured.
1t was Don Cabello Luengo Y Corto
ell Seso who remarked that he proposed
to apply for the title of Due de la Chi
cago y Omaha in addition to his
other titles. Don Pereza Lave de Pob.
reza remarked that he had chosen the
title of Due de New York y Hoboken
as his share of the plumber, adding
that he had heard that there were no
less than four banks IN New York.
Just then white flag was displayed
on the Iowa. The two dons immedi-
ately went out to take possession. They
were disappointed, however. 1t was
only "Fighting Bob" Evans, who had
had his other shirt washed and hung
out to dry. They are still waiting for
the Americans to surrender.
O*O
The following pretty story is told OF
man who afterward became the ia.
ther of the literature and poetry of his
country:
When he was little boy, he was one
evening sailing across lake with his
father in small boat. Looking up to
the star studded sky above, his father
asked him what he supposed the stars
were.
The boy replied thoughtfully: II
suppose that God, being very old
man, walks across the vault of heaven
leaning heavily on cane, and when
he leans too heavily on it, the ferule of
of the cane penetrates the vault, and
then the glory and brightness of heaven
shines through the holes, and that is
what we call stars.
"Apraham, 1 hat Won fine free atver-
tisement."
"Vot it vos?"
I've say nit dot baber dot We pay
dose men in our ombloy vot vas to en-
leest shust de same ven dey gone. Hey
"Aber mein Colt, Isaac, dot will us
ruiniren."
"Aber NIGHT. We hat in our employ
shust dirty.sefen girruls ant drei duties
dat smoke cigaroots."
Grand, Isaac, grand"
O%O
How the bitter often gets bit is again
demonstrated in the case of the Katie
Emmett mine at Clear Creek, Colorado.
This mine was abandoned as worth
less when the owner, wishing to recu-
perate at the expense of some tender
foot, managed by dint OF various rep
reservations as to the prospective rich
ness of the mine to induce pair of
this interesting species to invest their
money in the abandoned hole in the
ground. But as he was kind. hearted
man and did not want them to waste
their strength in tunnelling in the
granite, he pointed out to them a soft
spot in which to dig the regular ten
foot hole.
Before that hole was finished the
tenderfeet were taking gold nuggets
from the decomposed quartz. The ten
derfeet are now rich and are shipping
ore running 5000 to the ton.
The smart man is now hiring men
by the day to kick him.
O&O
was millionaire once Lost it in
speculation. Want to know about it d?
1t was this way:
engaged in the brokerage business
in Constantinople in partnership with
Yusuf Ben Ibrahim, an Armenian
apostate, who was smart enough to
cheat Jew out of his eye teeth. We
did flourishing business in Georgians
and Circassians, selling largely for fu-
ture delivery, and had contracts for
supplying the harems of many of the
greatest pashas, when Yusuf hit upon
the fatal idea of cornering the market
for Circassians.
Well, his scheme seemed plausible
and we had already bought for future
delivery more than four times as many