The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1898-07-25
THE PICNIC SEASON.
4 Few Reflections Cpon n summer
Pastime by Practical Man.

THIS Is the season 81 the year when peo-
ple-otherwiSe saCe-s~arm out into the
country 10 be bitten ny insects, acquire
freck.ss. and suffer other a1scornforts. My
impression OF a picnic WAS that il vas
counted on as being = jolly day spent out
In the woods VI here the scent OF new nlown
trees ard Joily carols Of the crow and song
birds aiiei the air. along with The regu-
lation moss covered hooks. trailing ivy and
purllng brooks. But now I know better, I
DO. IN other words. man. poor man, In
herited the custom from his remote an
cestors Primitive man i.ved IN the woods
continuously and his descendants are IN
able 10 shake of the inherited instinct -
camp nut
Nevertheless, l am pretty we'll satisfied
since I overheard a conN erSatlon between
two young ladies on the street that shere
is still another explanation for The picnic
mania which breaks out every summer.
Tie blonde asked the brunette II she Was
gong 20 the picnic. 10 which the latter
replied that she was net. as the young
man 20 whom she was engaged objected.
Oh replied the blonde. Il didn't know
YOU were engaged. ~ course. you have
got fellow roped in already. you don't
need 10 go 70 picnIcs any more, anyhow"
Like 81. Paul on The road 10 Minneapolis,
saw a great northerIs light. and the pop
uiarity OF p4cgics was Invested of much o.
its mystery.
The picnic. from my view OF it, taken
on the spot. is as full OF de.us.ve decep-
tons dire disasters. and dreaded calaIni-
ties as a Dutchman * full OF lager a The
ball. given by the Sandwich and Beer Club.
People VINO 40 TO p.cnics are 80 happy
when they get home they are glad they
went. \ picnic may be relied on 10 yield
s. worth Of solid misery for every nickel
spent az il
As soon as the victims OF the picnic
habit have found splendid. delightful
place, and a table is spread. down comes
the rain, and for the rest OF the day the
picnic, rletaphorcally speaking, sits IN the
woodshed with its umbrella between It's
knees. While there are no flies, SO 10
speak. or a thunder storm a. a disturbing
element. still half a dozen enteFprising hor-
nets can create more CONSERVATION than
the livei!est thunder storm.
Il Is strange that in droughty parts OF
the country, like parts Of Arizona, Kansas
and other states | could mention. the pic
mic has never been utilized as Il sure means
Of breaking UP the dry spells. Picn!cs Will
DO for the good people OF the above dry
sections o. country what the rainnakers
have failed TO do. namely. bring rain. and
bring it In large quantities.
Another discomfort Is the amalgamation
OF the eetahes and drinkables This is
discovered as soor The baskets are
opened. Much difficulty is experienced
81 pai3liltS the lidsli SdHu"ltftSS fEtIIi
the lemon pie The mustard has been
carefully scraped of the dome Of the
pound cake, while the gentleman who
has kindly volunteered TO carry the
basket walls out loudly over the dis
covery on his new ligh; suit OF clothes
that the custard pie has been ooz.ng out
ever since the procession started. The
glass Jar has lost rs top and the cold tea
that was in Il IS now 20 be rung out Of
the nice clean linen napkins. The warm
mellow lemonade IS drunk with a live
grasshopper in Il. while the condition Of
the cheese suggests that chloroform be
used 10 prevent its escape.
one Of the lucky men a. the picnic Is the
enthusiastic youth who shins up a tree to
adjust me swing. lie pats his foot on a
dead limb. takes 4 drop ana disioca;es
his hip. He is sent home in a wagon. and
thus escapes a more lingering death from
dyspepsia.
VIA; pen Is able to 80 justice 10 the
picnic pie with is plaster ~ Paris crust
and its evaporated hlackberries. harder
than kloniikc miners heart ever Will re
When chunk Of l. has penetrated he
system II the un~uspccting victim he -
4 doomed man. Then, too. there "a the
kiln-dried picnic chicken. The softenng
Influences OF tho golden summer time has
no visible effect on the limb Of this fowl
Verify. ! say unto you, The man who IS
not ostrich, and has not the digestive
facilities ~ an anaconda. should shun the
picnic with its leather pickles ard the
heayy~e eight auge! cake etc However n
he survives. The boarding house fare has
no terror for HIN he car pat an with any,
thing short of lead biscuits. aud frozen
rocks.
Some people maintain THAI The man who
engineers picnic does not get . rest. This
= a mistake. He works hard three or four