The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-04-18
MR.. FLYNN'S MORNING NIP
THE KING OF THE FIFTEENTH
WARD DRINKS "WAUKEsHA."
1t Almost Cost Him His Life Yestcr-
day MOrning-He VIII Drink NO
More of 1t.

The Honorable Bill Flynn, saloon keeper
and assistant sprinl1ling inspector under the
Taggart administration, was born under q
lucky star. and an incident of yesterday
morning fully confirms this fact. Mr.
Flynn's charge on the silver push in the
Iron Hall building, the uneXamped heroism
of his personal encounter on that occasion,
his escape unscathed from the very jaws of
defeat, if not death. is a matter of history.
AT the recent Taggart primary i'll his ward
many a man went to the floor in the scrim-
mage, but the Honorable Bits pennant still
flew at the masthead when the last of the
enemy guns were spiked and the bartender
Lad mopped up the gore. On Easter Sun
day Irish friend tried to prove himself
the best man in the Honorable Bits saloon
and DIR. Courtney sewed up all the evidence
which went to show that he wasn't the
best man. Yesterday Mr.. Flynn took an
other shy at fate, and after-but this is get
ting ahead of the story.
Recently Mr.. Flynn has been drinking
Waukesha water, habit which has to be
followed surreptitiously in the Fifteenth
ward. He didn't even confide his secret to
his bartender lest that worthy lose respect
for his employer. If it should ever become
known in the Fifteenth ward that Bill Flynn
had signed the pledge, that same Flynn
would be hurled from his throne in a fifty.
But it is not known for certain that Mr..
Flynn signed the pledge, although that
seems the only rational reason for any good
Democrat drinking Waukesha water. Sat
ur1ay night Mr.. Flynn took down his bottle
of Waukesha and put It back on a shelf, to
be placed in the refrigerator when time
came for closing up. After locking his doors
the saloon keeper grabbed the bottle which
he found on this back shelf and planted it
on the ice
Yesterday morning, bright and early,
Flynn opened the refrigerator for his Wau-
kesha water. fitting the long-necked bot
tie, he took copious draught, and then
spewed out a mouthful of it.
THE divils own wather is this!' he eX-
claimed. Walker Shaw, is 1t? If It's
Walker Shaw, he's did and in tn bottle,
an he's bin did long time, too, from tn
taste O. it. Humph! Mibbe that's tn way
this wather is intinded to be, for l know
some wathers do be doin' tn more good the
rottener they taste. I'll take another swig
jist to dhroWn the taste of tn first one
So up went the bottle, and a quart of the
Flynn was thirstiest. The gentleman sud
Who's had this Walker Shaw bottle Of
mine?" he bawled out. 'Oi say, who's had
this Walker Shaw wather of mine? Be-
gorra, I'm done for. Sind for a docther!"'
And send for the doctor they did. The
medical gentleman was prompt in respond
ing. He ascertained. first, that Mr.. Flynn
had swallowed a quart of benzine. Then he
took steps to relieve the patient of the ex-
plosive fluid. In short time the assistant
sprinkling inspector was out Of danger. and,
now being entirely recovered, he is the vic
tim of his friends pointed remarks. 1t is
said when he discovered he had swallowed
benzine he clapped his hand over his mouth
and mumbled:
Hare We, Tarry ne-mum-mum-tak
away thot saygar. Poot out thot foire, l
say, and don't COON near me wild it! Poot
id out Dye want ter make a volcano out
o. me? Poot id out!'
Mr.. Flynn is now all right, and will be
inspecting sprinkling in his usual happy
style this morning.