The Pascagoula democrat-star. (Pascagoula, Miss.) 1878-1920, 1898-09-09
TIE SUCKER WELL DEFINED

A sucker Is the little fish that Ia
worth the little worm it takes to catch
him; but the human sucker is yener.
ally caught with an empty hook, and
hooked in the gills at that.
. A sucker is a ''hWdOO' who buys
packages of soap with $40 bills in
them for S..
A sucker is a fellow who Signsa re.
ceipt for a car load VI grindstones and
then finds ont that he has signed
note for 5000.
A sucker is a farmer who buys his
goods from a travelling pcddler when
he can buy them Of his home mcr.
chant for Is per cent less.
The sucker is the windbag who sits
around In the store and abuses every.
body behind their back and imaginess
people don't hear Of it.
A sucker Is a business man who
sends his job work to some snide
house out 0f town, and expects his
home paper to blow up the town and
benefit him and his e~ntcrprislng
ncighbOrs.
A sucker Is a kicker who opposes
every improvement and rails at every
hustler in the town until some other
town springs IN near him and his
property depreciatcs IS per cent in val.
ne, and can't sell Tat that or get out
OF debt until the sheriff helps him out.
A sucker is small Alexander at
twenty, who knows more than his
grandfather at eighty.
The world and water are full Of
suckers and the shore lined with
sharks. The current is principally
down the stream aud the suckers
must swim against the current II
they don't want to get hooked.
Here is a Columbia, Mo-, special to
the St. Louis Globe DemOcrt, which
reads more like fiction than fact:
Downing Buckner and Miss Fannie
Reid were married here to-day under
strange conditions. In order to ob.
the marriage license which had fallen
into the hands VI a rival Of his pres
ent wife, Mr.. Buckner was Obliged to
agree to IA contract tn the effect that
should his wife die or Il divorce result
no must without further choice at
once marry the rival, who dictated
1.-THE terms 81 the contract. Announce.
ment Of the immediate marriage OF
Mr.. Buckner and Miss Reid was made
several weeks ago. The prospective
groom and his party were ut the
church and all was in readiness. AT.
ter waiting several hours for the
bride, YhO came not, they were In.
formed tn she had decided not to
marry, andsf3p1 just boarded q train
for St. Louis.
She remained there until she heard
Mr.. Buckncr was preparing to lead 10
the altar Miss Lucille Johnston, a
bitter rival. When Miss Reid heard
this she came to Columbia in . hurry,
and told Buckncr she was eager u
J marry him at once. Miss Johnston
was promptly forsakcn and the mar
riage Of Buckncr to his FIRST love was
set for to-day. A license was procur
ed and placed In the hands OF Rev
w. II. Osburn. When the weddlnI
party were assembled, Mr.. Osburn as
founded Mr. Buckner by asking FOL
!. the license. Buckner stated that h'
supposed tito be In the hands OF MI
Osburn. Then there was sensation.
Investigation proved that MIS-
Johnston, the ~f0rsaken, had socure'
the license by sending TO Rev. Osbur'
,, a messenger, who claimed to reprcsen
Buckner. Things were looking hope
= less, when Miss Johnston appcare'
n and cody confessed that the lIcens
!, was 10 her possession. She then mad
q proposition to the effect that sh
would surrender II on condition tina
, in case Of death or divorce from III
J Hrst wife Duckncr must marry MIS-
Johnston. The terms were acccptce
II and the wedding proceeded wlt''ou
further interruption.