The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1898-07-13
By Telephone from Limbo.

Davy Jones Threatens to Resign IL the
Yanks Overwork Him So.
Telephone Call, 14746, July 3, 8 A. M
"B-z z-z-z I'll"
"Hellol What's wanted2"
rs this Davy Jones' lockei3'
"Yes. Who's t~slking?"
"This is Admiral SIMPSONS feet.
Please call Mr.. Jones to the phone.
Hellol That you, Mr.. Jones?"
eyes; this is Davy Jones"
admiral Sampson sends his respects
and begs to inform you hat the Span
ish fleet is coming out of Santiago har-
Dor. Kindly prepare for its reception"
pretty crowded; but I'll do my
best. Good-by,"
"Good. by" BIZ z-z-t.
Telephone Cal, 14747, July 3, 1920
a. NJ
B z z-z-zl "Hellol Is this Admiral
SIMPSONS feet2'
eyes. Who's this talking2"
"Davy Jones. Present respects to
Admiral Sampson, and inform him that
PlutoD, first of consignment, has been
received. Good by"
Telephone Call 14748, July 3, 10:45
A. M
B-z-z-z.z-ztl "Hellol SIMPSONS Aeet2
This is Davy Jones. Furor received.
Good-by."
Telephone Call 1910, July 3. u M
B z.z-z.ztl "Hellol SIMPSONS feet?
Yes; this is Jones. Almiranta Oquen-
do re ceived. Coming pretty fast. Any
more comingP What's that? Goshi
Good by"
Telephone Call 1880, July 3, 1915
p. NJ
BIZ z.ztl "Hello, SampsonI Say,
slow down there, can't you? Infanta
Maria Teresa just arrived. Don't hus-
tie a man so. This is no summer no.
tel. Good-by."
Telephone Call ID, ISL, July 3, 1890
p. NJ
B-z-z-z-ztl' "Hellol Vizcaya arriv-
ed. Have put out Standing Room
Only sign. This is getting beyond a
joke. Two of my assistant mermen
have struck. What are you trying to
do; bottle me up, toe? Mol Apollo
gies don't GO. Good-by."
Telephone Call II. 1852, July 3, 2 p. NJ.
B z-z.z-ztl "Hello! That you, Samp-
son? No, 1 want the Admiral HIM
self. Hellol Look here.
Sampson, I'm boss here, and 1 want
you to understand that I've closed
shop. Set? The Cristobal Colons'
here, and she's the last. Understand
that? I've shut and locked the locker,
and I'm going back now to sit on the
cover. That goes, too. Good. by"
Telephone Call 1853, July A., 10
A. M.
B-z-z-z. ztl "Hellol This the White
House, U. S. A.?"
ItVoe. uhot,a Uoptod0B
"Davy Jones's respects to President
Mckinley, and he'd like to talk with
him over the phone for a minute.
. Hellol
"This President Mckinley? Congrat-
ulations, Mr.. President, on your glori-
Gus Fourth"
MANY thanks, Mr.. Jones. Can 1 be
of any service to your"
eyes, MI. President; l want you to
call off your navy"
"Beg pardon, Mr.. Jones. 1 don't
think l quite understand you."
"Mr. President, I've got too much
business. l want a respite"
"But what have p
"I'l tell you. On May l 1 got a con-
signment of Spanish ships from Adj
miral Dewey"
eyes"
"I've just got them nicely slowed
away, and now comes Admiral Samp-
son with a rush order that's just swamp
ed my accommodations, and am hiring
extra help as fast as l can"
"I'm sorry we disconnected you,
Mr.. Jones'"
"Now, Mr.. President, as between po-
tentate and potentate, l want to ask
you if you've any more Spanish ships
in sight?"
swell, there's another feet around
at Suez that
"Great green-eared sea-serpentsl
Another? Do you think l want a
Spanish colony down here? l won't
stand it'll"
"But, Mr.. Jones-"
"No but about it, Mr.. President.
1 won't stand it'll You send 'em here
and III turn 'em back. There's q linn
it to my endurance. No, sir, I'll turn
the locker over to the mermen and GO
out Of business, and that settles it,"
every we'll, Mr.. Jones. In that case
Wen have to keep that Spanish feet
ourselves"
"That's the idea, Mr.. President.
Congratulations on your victory and
good-wait a minute. Mr.. President,
will you do mt a favor?"
with pleasure, Mr.. Jones. What is
it?"
"If your nation gets into trouble
with Germany let mi know in time 30
that l can resign and 60 and climb a
tree"
Certainly. Good-by, Mr.. Jones'"
"Thanks. Good-by, Mr.. President"
BIZ z zt.-New York Sun.
Mrs. Shackleford-"They say that a
distinct moan comes from Niaoara.n