The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1898-09-11
Pulchritudinous Republican Candi-
dates,

Personal pulchritude is a condition
precedent to success in politics in only
two congressional districts in the coun-
try The unique in appellation has
come to be a prime requisite for the
attainment CT political eminence In
some of the rural districts in Georgia
and Ala ALBANIA. Our own Col. Mic POtt-
gieser attained some fame and one o.
flee for the sole reason that he had
been blessed in his name. The Hon.
Dink Bolts took to himself the admir-
alton Of his fellows and attained to
some dignity because his name could
not possibly be misspelled or faulty
pronounced. Henry Feig and DR.. Zier
had place in the lawmaking body of
this state because simplicity predom-
mated in the naming Of them. 1t ap-
peals to the unlearned, this simpllfca-
ton of appellatiOn, and is a thing easily
understandable But this other thing
Of personal beauty contributing to po-
ltical success is not so easily appre-
ciated.
1t does not appear to us that the edu-
cation of the people in the thing beau
tiful has gone far. The eye that Is
gratified by the yellow dado may look
askance on the countenance Of good
seeming. The Seventh district Republi-
can who holds that there is beauty in
an Eddy would necessarily be Social
list if he lived in the Third district and
the same arguments were advanced for
his support of the lovely and altogeth-
err ingenious Joel HeatWOle. Eddy was
elected because he was a plain, blunt
man. It has been proved to us by oc-
ular demonstration that Mr.. Eddy is
beyond question plain man; his con-
gressional life has demonstrated his
bluntness. Yet he ran upon the same
platform with Joel and was elected for
the very reason that Heatwole's OPP
ponent was defeated. Here, then, is
contradiction in premises. The Third
district of Minnesota Is Republican be-
cause Joel HeatwOle is lovely; the Sew
enth district is Republican because the
countenance of Mr.. Eddy is so far re-
moved from the lovely that it Is alleged
to have been remarked by his young
son that his papa would be much bet
ter off if he had no face at ALL This
may be mere rumor, into the truth Of
which we shall not now inquire.
It is clear, however, that Mr.. Kinds,
who has accepted the challenge Of the
lovely Joel, must put aside the discus
sion Of principles and meet Joel on
grounds aesthetic. The soundness of
the theory Of protection is not so much
involved in the campaign that is about
to open as is the theory Of inherent
loneliness in the face and features Of
ID Of
to revise the canons of beauty that
have hitherto prevailed in his district.
Let him educate the people to accept
the old maxim that handsome is that
handsome does" that personal beauty
Is not the element that counts for
influence in all Of the striCts Of Wash
ington. If he will but convince the peo-
pie that the personal attributes Of a
Sam Phillips are not the elements Of
which statesmen are made; that in
fuence in Washington and the good Of
the country are not so much dependent
on the looks Of the congressman as on
his soundness in such small matters
as the tariff and other governmental
theories; If he will show to them that
the beauty of Joel is but skin deep, and
that his presence in Washington does
not contribute as much to the welfare
OF the country as it does to the gayety
Of nations, Mr.. Heatwole will not be
the next congressman from the Third.
If, on the other hand. Mr.. Ringdal
can only open the eyes Of his consti-
tuents to the real seeming Of the pres
ent member from the Seventh; II he
can but show them Eddy as he is; can
poiDt ont 70 them that some sort of
countenance must be presented in Or
| der to induce a hearing for the i'm
pruvement Of the condition Of the peo-
pie, then will the Seventh district re-
deem itself and the loneliness Of Joel
and the LONELINESS Of Eddy will no
longer be in the category of national
issues.