The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1898-02-19
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Il AN sue. luOusduu paIuOhSt
You look so happy and so independent,
felt sure you were the servant"
Parson Johnson-So dis little chile
am gal. Do de udder one belong toe
de contrary sex? Mrs. Jackson-Yais.
pahson; OATS gal, too.-Judge.
THAT man singing Only One Girl In
the World for Me" has been married
three times.". "Well, that's all right;
he means only one girl at a time
Chicago Record.
Il see" said the shoe clerk boarder,
that there is king In Africa who has
been drunk for fifteen years" That"
said the Cheerful Idiot, "ls what might
be called soaking reign. "-Indianap-
oils Journal.
"Iichael, what kind of a tree is
thatT "The one beyant the bineh,
mumT Eyes, that large tree" vivid
the little green one to the llftr'' yes;
what is it?" ''They do be calling that
a shade-tree, mum."-Brooklyn Life.
She Heard 1t Flrst.-Bob Borrower
What! You say you can't lend me ten
dollars today because you haven't got
it-why, l heard you made FIVE hun
dred dollars yesterday. on wheat. Tom
Tooler ldespairingly)-We so did my
wife.-Puck.
Last night" said Mr.. Booze, Il
made remark TO the effect that had
one of the greatest heads In the ward"
HIM Of l,o a II.
We'll, this morning | feel fully pre-
pared to say that was right. "-Clncln-
natl Enquirer.
Wheeler-IIave you learned to make
the repairs on your wheel yet? Sprock
No; | never SHALL either. ! haven't
n bit of mechanical genius. "Oh. yes
you have" Indeed haven't
couldn't even invent a car coupler
Cincinnati Enquirer.
A Useful Art.-"Of course" said one
old farmer to the other, your boy Is
learnin' Latin and Greek Mt college,
but is he gettln anything practicalY
"Oh, yes. In the last letter he writ, he
tells me he Is takin lessons In fencln'."
Detroit Free Press.
violet-How did Mr.. Bighed come to
accept the doctrine of reincarnation
Roosevelt, you know, he always had
an impression that the world couldn't
get along without him, aud If that Is
so, II stands to reason that he will
have to come back.-Truth.
How old would you guess her to
be-" ''oh, about % would be a safe
guess" shes surely older than
that?' II said % would be n safe
guess. 1t Is always safer to under
guess a woman's age. She may hear
Of it.'-Indianapolls Journal
And. in spite of all the light that
has been brought into your lives. you
still burn mlssionarles?" The savage
was palpably confused. yes" he an
swered, sadly; Il must confess thatcv
llzation doesn't seem to have made
our cooks appreclably better. Puck.
What this country wants to do"
said the reformer, sis TO raise the re-
quirements for ofiice-holders. SEX
actly So" replied Senator Sorghum;
and allow me to remind you that the
principal requirement of an office
holder is his salary. Washington
Star.
mo man ever obtained anything
worth having without working hard
for It," said Mrs. Blckers to her hus-
band, who was In discouraged mood.
That's So" replied Mr. Blckers, re-
fectively. 81 remember that obtain
ed you without the slightest difficult
ty."
A naughty little boy was crying be-
cause his mother wouldn't let him go
down TO the river on the Sabbath, and,
on being admonished, said: Il didn't
want to in In swimmin with 'em, ana.
! only wanted to go down and-and see
the bad little boys get drowned for
goin' In swimmin' on Sunday"
II thought that Miss Homewoods
essay was much the best OF all those
read at the commencement" That's
odd. | never knew that she had much
literary ability. What was the sub
ject of her essay How to Make a
Cherry Pie. ''-Pittsburg Chronlcle-Tel-
egraph.
Now, Johnnie" said the teacher,
''tell me what an engineer ls?' HE is
n man that works an engine" replied
Johnnie. Correct" said the teacher.
Now. Tommy, can you tell me what a
pioneer lsY' Eyes, SIR" answered
Tommy; hes man that works
piano"
George" said the senior partner to
the Junior in a law-frm of three, ~
thought you told me that Alfred had
gone out of town on legal business? |
understand he's down the road on a
visit to a young lady" "Well, sir"
said George, with an injured look. ITS
not Illegal TO call on young lady, |
believe"
Mamma, what is hereditary ask
ed little Robby, laboriously tripping
Over the syllables of the long word.
why, it is-it Is anything you get
from your father or me-" replied the
mother, IA little puzzled for definition
suited TO his years. "Oh, know" he
exclaimed, you mean spankin',
don't you, mamma|
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Increase of Populations.
During the last slxty-fve years the
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