The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1898-08-18
Sforyeffes.

In the name OF God, amen! l,
Timothy Doolan, of Barrydownderry,
in the county of Clare, farmer; being
sick and wake on my legs, but of sound
head and warm heart-glory to God
do make this my first and last will and
Ould and New Testament. First |
give my soul to God, when it PLACES him
to take it-shure, no thanks to me, for
/ can't help it thin-and my body to be
buried in the ground at BarrydOwn-
derry chapel, where all my kith and
kin that live after, belonging to me
are buried-pace to their ashes and
may the sod rest quietly over their
bones. Bury me near my godfather
and my mother who lie separated alto
gether at the other side of the chapel
yard. l lave the bit of ground contain
ing ten acres-rale old irish acres-tO
me eldest son Tim, after the death of
his mother, if she lives to survive him.
My daughter Mary and her husband,
Paddy O'Regan, are to get the white
sow that is to have twelve white bonifs.
Teddy, me second boy that was killed
in the war in Amerikay, might have
got his pick of poultry, but as he is
gone I'll lave them to his wife who died
a wake before him. 1 bequeath to all
mankind fresh air from heaven, all the
fishes of the sea they can take, and all
the birds of the air they can shoot. l
lave to Peter Rafferty, pint of poth-
cen can't finish, and God be merciful
to him after he drinks Tx.
O%O
A close listed old farmer thought
there was a good chance to get some
legal advice from the young man, gratis,
so he dropped into his Off Q, told him
how glad he was that he had come into
town, because the old Judge was getting
superanuated; and contrived in the
course of the talk to get the legal in
formation he wanted, and then bidding
him good morning was about to leave,
when the young man asked for his fee.
what for?" said the old farmer.
"For legal advice" said the young
lawyer.
How much is it ?"
Give dollars
The farmer declared he would never
pay it, and the young lawyer told him
if he didn't he would sue him. SO the
farmer trOtted down to see the old
judge, whom he found hoeing in his
garden, and said:
Judge, | went in this morning Just
simply to make neighborly call on
that young scamp of lawyer who just
came to town and he charged me So"
Served you right" said the Judge.
"You had no business to 60 to him."
swell, have got to pay t."
"Certainly you have"
well, then, if | must l must. Good
morning"
Hold on" said the judge, ''aren't
you going to pay me-"
''Pay you; what for:'
"Why, for legal advice, of course"
what do you charger"
"'Ten dollars"
The result of it was that the old fell
low had to pay So to the young lawyer
and SO to the old one.
Moral-Don't try to get legal advice
for nothing.-Granite Falls Journal.
OzkO
Scene 1-Train stopping at a big
junction.
Ticket Collector examining passeng-
er's ticket)-This won't do you will
have to get out and
Passenger shall not get out. re-
fuse to be bullied by you. Here is my
card. You have your remedy, etc., etc.
Ticket Collector only wanted to
say sir
Passenger-Don't talk to me. You're
only a mental. Fetch the station mas
ter.
Ticket Collector-It's all right, sir.
(Train proceeds, and passenger relates
tales of his various triumphs over rail-
way officials).
Scene "A dark and lone railway
platform. One melancholy figure,
brooding
Passenger (thoughtfully)-I wonder
if that collector only meant to tell me
1 was on the wrong train.-Tid- Bits.
o.
A man stood on the bank of Chap
man creek in Dickinson county, Kan
sas, the other day and gazed long and
curiously at big cottonwood tree that
stood we'll down on the bank, and then
to a reporter for the Chapman Standard
he told of the interest felt by himself
in that narticular free In 1890 q oloud