St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1898-03-19
THEY NET AT '.PUGE."
by NJ. QUAD.

Fhe old farmer with the spectaclea
on his nose had spent ten minutes read
ing card tackled up on the market
house when the red-faced policeman
sauntered up and observed:
Il see you are reading about the
scraps 10 come off before the Knock
Out club tonight. DO you think of at
tending?"
"Not by iugfull!" was the prompt
and hearty reply. mo, sir, don't
want nuthin' more to do with fighters,
nor my son Moses don't either"
Been getting into trouble with y
.puge? queried the officer.
"You might call 1t trouble. and l
guess it was. Moses and me was COM
in to town with load of 'taters about
month ago, when we seen a feller
comm on the run down the road. It
was purity hot weather. but he was all
bundled up like winter. As soon as we
sees him Moses says:
Dad, thar's critter as has bin up
10 some badness in town. and l guess
we'd better stop him.
"'All right, Nose Gays /. Hes a
purity hefty lookin' kuss, but / guess
you kin git away with him. II you
can't, then I'll help
Il stopped the team," continued the
old man with sigh, "and Moses jumped
down and spit on his hands and got
ready fur bizness. rayther expected
to see the feller jump the fence and take
TO the fields, but he cum right along
as sassy as you please. When he got up
to us Moses squared of and told him he
was prisoner. He kinder smiled at
fust and was goin' to pass on, but Moses
got in front of him and says to me:
dad. watch my left. I'm goin' to
let fly fur the pint of his jaw!'"
"Then you know something about the
ring?" said the officer.
"Mose does, but I don't. He Jest
hauled of and let fly, and the next
thing / saw WINS Moses turnin' cart
wheels up the road. 1t seems that his
left didn't reach. The other seller's did,
however, and Moses was still playin'
circus when I jumped down and squared
of and swung my right"
"But you must know something
about the ring" persisted the officer.
"Noap-not a blamed thing!" replied
the farmer. 'Me and Moses used to
think we knowed sunthin' bout swings
and punches and jabs and upper cuts.
but we was all wrong. / swung fur the
feller's jaw. but landed on air. Then
he swung fur mine. and his duke
loosened every tooth in my head and
all the hair on top of 1t. I was sleepin'
away when a feller Gums along and
wakes me up. and I gin him dollar
to 60 arter Moses and git both of us
into the wagon. Arter we had drawed
a long breath and found we wasn't dead
Moses locks up in sorrow to me and
says:
Dad. did the same locomotive hit
you, too"
".It did, my son-it did, says I.
".And hadn't we better go home fur |
THAT'S what we've got to do, Moses.
We also want about week to figger |
Oh this thing. You let fly with your
left?
"I did. and second later my hull |
body was fyin'. You swung with your
right, didn't you?
"I did, Nose, and that. was the last
! remember fur half an hour"
"You must have run up against a
puge' who was running his six miles
and back" said the officer.
eyes. reckon it was that way" re-
Piled the old man, "but it took me and
Moses jus: three weeks to fgger it out,
Ind he still hollers out in his dreams
Every night and seems to be goin' into
! decline"
OF C0urseI
She-Yes, they are expensive materi-
lis; but agree with Polonious-.'Cost-
y thy habit az thy purse can buy"
Her Friend-That was his advice to
| young man, was 1t not?
She-Certlinly! No man would find
I necessary to give such advice to