Butler citizen. [volume] (Butler, Pa.) 1877-1922, 1898-08-04
What a Drummer
Saw and Thought

vile yesterday 1 SAT Dentnu t"o
bows who were trying 10 impress me
and everyone else IL the smoking car
with the tact thai they were men OF
the world and fairly desperate char
acters.
They were between IL and &c, I should
Judge. and this age, under proper con-
ditions, represents the ful! bloom OF
amateur deviitry and afoolishuess. These
bows we're not from the country. They
we're from Bonneville, and they affected
that superior manner and easy ltnoTl-
edge of The world which come from 3
long residence IN town.
From the moment they came into the
car and fell into their seats with smi!-
ing abandon they were acting. They
wanted everyone to know thas they
we're experienced ana reckless young
men to whom a Journey by railroad WAS
an everyday incident Perhaps they
deceived each other. but they didn't de-
ceiye anyone else. Their acting was
too labored.
say, Ed, have you another cigar
there in your pockst?'
What's the din il / have?"
'.Aint you goin' to set 'em up TO
smoker"
why the dickens didn't you buy
some cigars before we started? You
might know we can't get DO good cigars
over at Ransom. They don't keep any
kind over there but them regular
stogiee."
"oh, rats Be q sport and set 'em
up"
These Introductory remarks were
made IN tones which aroused everyone
In the car. An cld-time travelling man
across the aisle from me had HIS head
down on his grip and ives trying to
catch n little sleep when the two be
gan. He opened his eyes slowly and
shook his head.
Two more of those train-ro bbers,"
he murmured.
Before the train started the two des-
peradoes made several illusions to some
experience Of the night before. They
made frequent use OF the word beer"
in order 10 let IL De known tnat tney
were confirmed drinkers, aud, also, they
garuished their loud talk with clumsy
swearing.
There are several kinds OF profanity
and some of Ii is not only endurable,
but actually enjoyable, II you can dis
regard the question of morality. a
commander urging his soldiers in the
madness Of battle is not generally
blamed If he swears little. A cowboy
handling q broncho, a boss canvesman
directing circus gang" an impatient
man milking cow in 1iytime, freight
brakeman who misses a coupling or Il
bike rider who suashes his wheel ten
miles from repair shop may let out
string of expletives that are simply pic
turesque in variety and intensity.
don't say that these men are justified IN
giving vent TO their feelings, but 1 do
say that sometimes It is worth going
miles to hear them.
But abhor the swearing of the young
man who does not know how TO swear.
lie does not swear by impulse or from
habit. He has to struggle to accom-
plish anything, and Re is half ashamed
CT himself at the time. Under such cir
cuTnstances profanity becomes an ap-
palling wickedness, even to the most
hardened "rounder."
As | sat behind those two boys and
listened to their noisy discussion of the
late orgies and their painful efforts to
impress US with their worldliness II oc
CURED to ne that II would be Il good
idea 70 take those two boys out and
have them photographed in their sum
mer suits, with the hashy white felt
hats and rainbow cravats, and after
that let them talk for about 30 minutes
into phonograph.
Twenty years from now, after they
have become seedy and haryl-headed
married IL eu, with growing children of
their own, It would give them cause for
reflection if they could take out these
photographs and study them and then
listen TO their own conversation IN the
phonograph. No doubt they would ex-
claim. what spectacular biaddcrs we
must have beenl"
The two boys on the train were fair
ly good types. have seen the same
kind OF young man in every small town.
Sometimes nv sense of humanity
moves me 20 appeal to the young man.
I feel az if I ought 70 SO up to him and
say; MY dear boy, don't be 90 desper-
ate. Don't think because you worry
your mother that you are really bad.
There are thousands Of young men in
this country who wear their hats pulled
forward and their cigars pointed up the
sare as you have them, and they have
;re same kind of tonthnick shoes and
speckled neckties, and they use the our
rent slang just as awkwardly as you do,
and are Just as far behind on the Popu-
lar songs. Because you drank two
glasses OF beer night before last and
ther sang a Hot Time In the Old Town
through the principal streets, that's 10
sign that you are q person of any I'M
portance. Don't hold your shoulders
IL that position when you walk, and
please don't swagger. It's great ef-
fort for you to be tough, and It annoys
other people"
! hope that no one will take 1t that l
am 'rapping" the small town. l was
born and reared In small town, and
nearly all of my friends live In the small
towns All that wish to do Is TO call
attention to one of the features OF town
life.
1t may be remembered that two
weeks ago I wrote something about tho
girls in the small towns. These girls,
as q rule, are lovely and well behaved.
OF course, there are few Of the feath-
er-headed variety who want to firt
with every stranger who comes into
town, but most OF them are essential
ly all right, and the only fault that
I have TO find with them is that some
times they endure the society Of the
weird young men with the loud voices
and tae hats over their eyes. y i rea-