Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1898-12-04


THE REAL. cYRANo.
mustache and his great nose.
Col" he cried fiercely. "Go!"
Help, help!" begged the actor.
GO on, Montfleury," advised the
mobiles indifferently. 1--WE will protect
you"
Another moment" cried Cyrano,
''and I must even slit his ears off. My
anger rises"
He left his chair and stood in the
middle of circle.
| Your protectors he said politely, Il
will meet first-one after the other. Cen
| tlemen, come on! What, none? All,
, then, to you alone 1 will devote myself.
| Thrice I will clap my hands, thus At
the third clap get you gone. One!"
Montfeury wavered. Hell stay!'
! shouted the crowd.
Two"
Gentlemen. begged Montheury,
"'twere discreet. he thinks
"Three!"
Amid the jeers and cries of the whole
house the enormously fat actor dis
appears on the instant. Cyrano, center of
circle. banded jests. Jodelet, the man
ager, mourned over entrance fees to be
returned.
Here, take that" called Cyrano, and
tossed him a bag of gold
And all the while the eyes of his cousin,
the dainty wit Roxane, were bent upon
him from her box.
Jodelet weighed in his hand the purse
that Cyrano had just thrown to him on
the stage and told him that at this price
he was welcome to stop a play every
night.
The audience rose and prepared to
leave the theater. The ladies in the
galleries stopped i'll adjusting thor
nantes and scarfs to listen to Cyrano,
who again mad the floor.
It's shameful, Montf1eury is pro-
tected by the Duke of Candal Have you
a patron?" demanded a bore of Cyrano.
mo patron or protector answers
Cyrano, grasping his sword, but 1 have
a protectress here
You'll have to leave town. The Duke
has a long arm
Not so long as mine when it's length
ened out" retorted Cyrano holding out
his sword. Show your heels now or
tell me why you stare so at my nose"
Your grace Mistakes" apologized the
bore drawing back.
Come now" said Cyrano what
amuses you? Is it that it's dangling like
an elephants trunk or crooked like an
orx-l,S O,- &c ha Rx hat taly
the air on the tip?'
'I-I-did not look. l was CAREFUL
! knew better
Then why did you look at my nose,
sir? Does it disgust you? Is its hue I'M
wholesome to you, or its proportions too
/ larger"
mo, no!'' gasped the bore. at is small,
| quite minute, in fact. Heaven help mel
It's enormous" said Cyrano, land I
| am proud to possess it. Every medder
knows that big nose is indicative of an
affable soul" And to illustrate his point
| he soundly cuffed the bore, and having
| taken him by the shoulder, turned him
| around. that he might administer part
| ing kick.
| The bore Runaway, calling to the guards
| for help, and Cyrano, having convinced
| the audience that he was a man of his
| word, warned them that the next who
! finds amusement in his Nose shall have a
| taste of his sword and not of his boot.
Down from the stage came De Guichd
| with his friend the Viscount de Valvert
| their swords Gathering at their sides and
! both annoyed at the turn events had tax
| en-, disappointed at not having seen the
| play and jealous perhaps of Cyrano, the
| hero of the evening, who had sprung into
| sudden popularity with the facetious Par
| isian audience.
This fellow become a nuisance" said
| De Guiche struggling his shoulders.
| "A swaggerer,' said De valvert. viii
no one put him DOWN.
a." answered the viscount will treat
him to one Of my quips. See here. sir
] your nose is-h'm-very bigi
| Very" answered Cyrano gravely, who
| was as great master of his tongue as hi
| was of his sword. rs that all you car
say young blade? Your repartee is e
| trife short. You might have said at leas
hundred things. Aggressively you NIGH
have said. sir, if 1 had such nose Ii
amputate it; or it must fill your cup wher
you drink you ought to have a drinking
. trough of special shape; or when YOU
| smoke your pipe do not the neighbor:
say The chimney's afirer or pray hav.
an umbrella made that the sun may no
| destroy its color: or this useful crook /.
the \latest thing TO hang your hat on
frienN: or, as rustic. It's dwarf pump
kin Of a prize turnip: or behold the nos