St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1898-12-10
and roar as my name went laundering

down the corridors of the ages yet TO
come. Those were happy days. geEtle-
men. and ] was the happiest man on
earth; for had not perfected the most
astonishing machine man had ever
dreamed of? Aow little then did !
ever think that !; would turn out to be
a Franke nstein that would rise up in
its might and destroy me at one fell
swoop. Yes. thought |. wealth and
fame and name will be mine as soon as
! get it on the market"
wont you tell us about the machine
itself?" asked Cleaver. Cant you tell
us the principle upon which ii was
constructed. how it was operated and
all about ;t?"
The Man locked out into vacancy
for a moment, and then crossing his
right leg over the Ief, knee and tap
ping the ash from his cigar. replied:
Yes, suppose I might as well-now.
1t can do TO harm. Iou see. he con-
tinued, "in the first place it was an cleo
trio mixer. Its system Of guide wheels
was so complete and perfect that II
acted as though it were possessed Of
intelligence. Gentlemen. that milker
ran itself, II was Only necessary that
the cattle be driven into a ten-acre
lot and TIE machine Sc: goiEg. Gen
tlemen, whether you believe it or not
it is nevertheless fact that that ma
chine would make for the mich COWS
only. II wouldn't run within ten feet
CT calf or a steer. 1t was worth go
ing ten miles to see that mixer dodge
stumps. Its movements were the pc.
ctry of motion. Its four little legs
swung along as rhythmically beautiful
as quatrain by Kipiing-"
"Rut where was the milk collected?'
asked the Doctor.
81 am coming to that" replied The
Man. From the tank of the milker
proper there extended back to the
edge of the lot four rubber tubes. the
other ends of which were fastened in
side porcelain bathtub standing on
its own platform on the other side OF
the pasture fence. The tubes, being
on the reel in the mixer. and rubbe /:
at that, would of course stretch as
the ground covered by the mixer in.
creased"
"And, gentlemen. the Strangest
thing about my milker was that il
was its own skinner, its own churn
its own cutter. its own stamper. You
think l am telling you an untruth.
will explain. As the milk ran through
these rubber tubes to the bathtut
on the other side of the fence and
fell into the little vat there pro-
vided, a set of paddles were put into op.
Grafton that 50 jiggled the milk that
the cream rose to the surface almost
instantly. This cream could be bottled
there at once and taken to the dairy
house. or wherever else ii w1s needed
by the bathtub attendant. The re-
naming milk was handled in this way
The aforesaid paddles did not cease
operations. They continued their con-
slant churning until the butter hal
thoroughly formed, when four knives
would drop from the top Of the tub ano
cut ii into chunks of the required
size. These would be instantly seized
by another set of paddles. which would
work the butter and roll it into long
bars.
THAT was all there was to the ma
chine" said The Man. 1T was upon
that machine that l based my hopes;
it vas by that machine that they were
shattered"
"Howe" asked Cleaver. "Didn't you
give il trial?"
"Yes," replied The Man. Sand thou
sands are the times since that ! have
wished I hadn't"
"What about the trial?"
"It was made out in Washtenaw
county. this state. / had managed t
interest a dairyman by the name oil
Sutherland. who lived about six miles
east of Ypsilanti. took the machine
down there. 1t was beautiful day
in early summer. 1t was the grass
butter time of the year. l set mp the
bathtub attachment just outside ths
pasture. l stretched the tubes owe;
the fence and connected them WITH
the mixer.
"When ail was ready l Sc: the ma
chine going.
Gentlemen, you should have beer
there!
II shall never forget the result o.
that trial as long as l live.
with whirr and rip of wheel:
that mixer started for mich COW
about ten rods down the pasture
The COW heard the noise and turned
Instantly her ears and tail stood per
pendicularly parallel. She gave one
| deep low and made break for tn:
open even before the other COWS il
/ the field had had time to observe ths
cause of her fright. She dashed
through the rail fence and broke fol
| the road, with that mixer after her
At the shattered fence the machine
| hes;tated an instant, owing to tht
tubes having stretched to their ut
most, then with a snort. 1t seemed Il
me, the mixer tore loose from the
wires and rubber Ct her fastenings ant
darted after that cow. On and on sh'
sped-the cow. And en- and on dowl
/ that country road dashed the mixer
The speed of each was awful. Suther
land and l ran across lots to head Of
either the COW or the mixer. but whel
we reached the road. half a mile below
we were just in time to see the milk
er pass On its wild chase. There, upol
; a little knoll, we watched it tearin:
| through the dust after the cow. Oh
and on it ran unit! finally ii hat
crossed the last iaillock of the roat
and .hen it disappeared. I said moth
ing. Leaving the oathtub attachmen
by the pasture fence, l went back t.
the crossroads station and took tn,
train for Huntsville. Later l had t
pay fo- the COW, for she never re
turned.
At this juncture the doctor ros'
from his chair, and taking a do!la
from his vest pocket offered it to tn
man. Thereupon each Of us gave hin
a coin. He stood and bowed his thanks
Then he put on that battered hat an.
slipped down the steps. We hear'
the gravel crunch beneath his heel,
The darkness of the night swallowe,
| him and he disa isappeared.-Detroit Ere