The Monmouth inquirer., 1898-03-17

snouts The compcsitor had set up
shouts correctly, but had not observed
that the top of the h was broken on.
An enthusiastic editor began his lead
ing article on a local election campaign
with the phrase, THE battle is now
opened" Unfortunately the composi+
tor transformed battle into bottle, and
his readers said that they had suspects
ed it all along.
Many of the humors of the compos-
ing-room arise from mistakes in pune
tuation. For example. the following
was prefixed to contribution in the
Poets Corner of a Cumberland journal:
''These lines were written nearly fifty
years ago, by a gentleman who has
for several years lain in the grave for
his own amusement" Another paper
in reporting a suicide said: Deceased
blew out his brains after bidding his
wife good-by with a gun" After the
last Egyptian campaign a London even
ing paper printed the following para
graph headed "A Claimants Generosi-
ty:" 'STo show the enthusiasm with
which our troops have been received,
we may mention that We have been
told of several instances where cabmen
have driven soldiers from Egypt to the
Barracks without charge. This was
generous. no doubt. but the journey
must have been hard upon the horses.
TO a writer in one of the many ladies'
journals we are indebted for the news
that ct has become the fashion of
late for ladies' TO take their tea in their
hats and gloves"
DIT III e~+f1 3r,1.c, so
verely at the hands of a Washington
reporter. who. describing the costumes
at the Presidential reception had in
tended to say that Mrs B. wore moth
ing in the nature of a dress that was
remarkable. He left hurriedly for the
West next day, when he opened the pa
per and read: Mrs. Brown wore moth
ing in the nature of a dress. That was
remarkable. A London paper report
ed on one occasion the capture in mid
channel of a large man-eating shark.
A provincial journal, copying the para
graph, but less careful about the pune
tuation, gave different version of the
incident. "A large man, eating shark,
was captured in mid-channel." The
omission of a comma once gave an
awkward Interpretation to paragraph
in a Dublin newspaper. which ran. "A
very handsome memorial has been
erected in st. Jerome's Cemetery to the
late Mr.. John Phillips accidentally shot
as a mark Of affection by his brother.
In the following instance, it was no
doubt bachelor compositor who. IN
setting up the toast, Woman. without
her, man would be a savage," by
trlfling transposition of the comma
made the sentence read. Woman, with
out her man, would be a savage. In
q sermon on drunkness which appeared
recently in a Dublin paper, the reyer-
end gentleman was made to say: 1T
was only last Sunday that a young girl
fell from one of the benches of this
church, while / was preaching in a
beastly state of intoxication.
In a certain newspaper, for instance.
the descriptions of a street brawl and
a church function were confused in this
fashion: "The crowd then proceeded
TO indulge in language of a profane and
obscene character. The Very Rev.
Dean B. preached on the occasion, and
the services was fully choral. the
worshippers at a Wesleyan chapel IL
well-known town in the Midlands
were once sadly shocked to find. at the
end of a report of one of their services
in a local paper, that The congrega-
Ion was large and respectable. and
drunk and incapable in charge of
horse and car" In one of the London
daily papers a high-fown eulogy of
new tenor, who was reported TO have
entranced the audience by his singing,
concluded with this astonishing state-
ment: He was sentenced to five
years penal seryitude, so that society
will for some time be freed from the
infection of his presence
Plausible Theory.