Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1898-07-08
FIRST FISHING STORY.

1t WAS when historic men roamed
over the thick forests oi the world,
and successfully maintained the right
t. fish in any stream or lake, that he
first leaned to romance, says Pick-Me-
Up. Before that time he was too
thick headed to tell lie, but there is
something about fish that stimulates
the brain; the phosphorus, perhaps
we never thought OF that before-any-
how, no sooner did prehistoric man
take to fish diet than he began to
tell lies. Prehistoric woman was the
first victim who had to hear these in
ventions. Then in prehistoric volapuk
she would say:
as that all? Why, they're not
worth cooking. You'll have to be
content with fried snails on bananas
again"
Penelope" he would cry, "you
should have seen the one lost-it
was the biggest fish ever saw. You
know that mastodon that l nearly
killed the other day."
"You mean the one you ran away
from, and was so frightened over?"
"That wasn't fright, silly; that was
excitement, and as to running away, l
only came to tell you to have look,
and you were so slow that it got away
before l could club it-well, never
mind about that now, but the fish l
lost was bigger than mastodon-
much bigger"
"Go along" Penelope would say as
she did up the last curling leaf and
patted it straight, and then began to
brush her back hair with a hedgehog.
"Fact; don't you believe me just be
cause I'm your husband? A man
never has any profit in his own home.
But this is the solid truth. Twas fish.
ing with one of these little tiddlers for
bait, and the trout came along and
snapped it up. I'd only hair line
"Wherc is he, then, Adair Fitzba-
BOOM"
"Can't you let fellow finish what
he has to say? AS soon as I'd got him
to the bank saw a jack, the biggest l
ever saw"
"But that isn't as big as a masto-
dom"
"Look here, Penelope" and the pre-
historic man rose angrily, If you in.
terrupt me again shall tell you moth
ing. Did 1 say that the jack was as
as big as mastodon?"
"Well, don't get angry, Adair; go
on with your story while 1 give baby
his supper"
Pshaw! You make me wish I'd
never married. For the last time, l
balted my hook"
"Oh, baited."
ayes, baited-now do you under
stand? I baited my hook with the
ten-pound trout"
"Seven pounds, you said"
"Well, seven, if you like. Perhaps
you weighed it?"
"No, but you said seven, and why
can't you stick to the TRUTH"
MADAM, do you mean to accuse
your husband of being liar?"
"I'm sure I never said so, Adair."
"You implied that's worse.
Now, don't interrupt me again."
ayes, 90 on Adair; Pm listening"
and prehistoric woman began to sing:
LULLABY baby on the treetop.
Hold by your toes or else baby will Drop"
Prehistoric man sprang once more
to his feet and cried angrily:
Enough, madam, you are becom-
ing more like your mother every day.
was going to say l caught that jack !;
it weighed ia pounds. l baited my
hook anew with it, and with it caught
a salamander weighing seventeen hum
dredwcight and more; again baited
my hook and nearly caught a fish of
the genus Placodorous cramensorus,
which weighed 102 tons and more. 1
had got it clear out of the water when
the line broke lost it and my bait
as we'll. was going to tell you all
this, but now I shall say nothing.
Nothing, madam, you understand?
Nothing. l shall 60 to my club. and
you needn't sit up for me-" and he
walked away, and prehistoric woman
said softly under her breath to baby:
"What a beautiful book papa could
write, If he wished"