The age-herald., 1898-01-30
HIS SUIT VS. HIRSUITE.
From the Washington Star. CHAP. I.

From the Washington Star. CHAP. I. Alphonse loved Marie He was the pas try cook at the Klondike hotel. She was chambermaid Being pastry cook, Alphonse had the dough. Being a cham bermaid, she had an eye out for the dust. Marie loved Alphonse in her way and he managed to put himself a great deal in her way He was short and stout, with a perfectly smooth face. Her face was also perfectly smooth. Neither rode a bike.
 CHAP. II. Emile was a waiter at the Klondke ho- tel, but he did not play the races with the tips he received. He was French. The first time he saw Marie he hummed a lit tie French song, and she was attracted with his charming Parisian accent. He had a little black mustache, waxed, oh! so carefully at the ends. This also att tracted Marie. Finally 1t was toss-up between Alphonse and Emile for the hand of Marie, until Emile became an odds-on favorite. The girl loved his mustache. He seemed to win by hair.
 CHAP. III.
 Alphonse declared sadly to Marie one night their return from the Bal Du Cercle Diablerie: "Once you lofed me, mais. Je believe you are-vat you call heem-stoock on Emile" His breath came in spaghetti-like chunks.
 Emile has such a lovely mustache, AL phonse,' the girl answered with happy have your lip shaven?" The strong man did not answer. It was because he thought he resembled the boy wonder
 CHAP. ".
 "Sacrem Alphonse muttered this because he was French, and the writer thinks it sounds we'll "I will foil heem yet. l haf ze gr-r-r-and scheme. Aime will assist me.
 This Aime was Alphonse's friend. He was an artist-a tonsorial artist, who had the Klondike barber shop. When he shaved Alphonse he never stuck his fingers In Alphonse's mouth, cut his chin or filed his eyes with the contents of the brush. They were like two brothers
 CHAP. V.
 Alphonse stood behind the barber's chair disguised. His eyes glttered and his false beard twitched convulsively.
 'It is hees time" he told himself. 'He has never failed to come yet" Aime says. q will be patient"
 It Emile's father day. If he failed to come all was lost. Alphonse realized this. He would lose Mare's love for ever.
 Hist! Emile approached He doffed his collar and necktie and took Alphonse's chair, Alphonse's hand trembled but he was outwardly calm.
 Flair cut or ze shaver" he asked in composed voice.
 Shave"
 Alphonses time had come. 1T will mes- mer-r-r-ize heem," he muttered.
 He used mesmerize instead of hypnotize because it gave him chance to rol his because it gave him chance to roll his forehead two or three times, and the man in the chair was wrapped in slumber. Quickly Alphonse scraped the razor over the upper lip of the victim. The mus tache disappeared. Emile awoke as if from a trance.
 "Ha, ha; now make ze lofe to Marie,' Alphonse shouted, in glee. "She will not speak to you again. Look in ze mirror. l am r-r-r-eyenged."
 Emile gave one glance in the glass at his changed appearance, leaped from the chair and fled from the shop.
 g CHAP. VI.
 Alphonse and Marie are husband and wife now. Alphonse wears a handsome mustache, and they both are as happy as the hairs of his moustache are long.
 As for Emile, speak his name gently It is not known what has become of him, but it Is said he has become a desperate char acter. It is even rumored that he has applied for a position as umpire in the Southern League for the coming season.