davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
PERSONAL AND i@PERsoNAL.


Mr. GlsAstone's voice shows no
sign of age II the listener but SHUTS
his eyes when the old man Is talkihg
he feels that he is being addressed by
g man in the prime of life.
Queen Victoria has just been pre-
scented with a fine collection OF blue
and white water lilies which were sent
her from New South Wales. The lines
we're frozen in lee, and when received
were in perfect condition.
There was a good deal Of sound hui
man nature in the unexpected reply
of the dying old woman TO her min
ister's leading questions; Here ut the
end of a long life, which of the Lord $
mereies are you most thankful for
Her eyes frightened as she answered.
My victuals.'
Lord Houghton's sister was often
ANNOYED at her brothers indiseriminate
hospitality. DO you remember, my
dear" he asked her at dinner one day
whether that famous seoundrel u
was hanged or nequitted?" "He must
have been hanged, or you would have
had him to dinner long ago" replied
the lady,
Prof. Heinrich Fellmath, OF Mu-
mich. has started the hobby Of collect
;ng street car tickets. He has founded
monthly bulletin, "Tralnbilletsport,
the object Of which is to give pictures
of tickets used for street car fare in
great cities and furnish detailed in.
formation about them. lie wishes to
establish society and trambillet
boerse.
Miss Mamie Dickens, the eldest
daughter of the great novelist, makes
her home ut quaint old Dunton rectory
In the town Of Brentwood, in Essex
The love of flowers, which with he1
amounts to passion, is fully gratitieo
IN that beautiful country. Her rea
life work consists in ministering to the
poor and sick and needy.
President Kruger, Of the South
African republic, is in his Goth year
! but is still Il wonderfully strong ano
dcllfc HiHl' IIS Is INV 81 ms ~
third term as president and is common
" known as "Oom Paul" or Uncle
Paul" He has been twice married ant
has a family of ten sons and daughters
He and his wife are very simple in theii
ways. They belong to the Doppers, {
strict sect of Dutch Professionals, Will
peeuliarities of manners and dress tina
somewhat resemble the QuRkers.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
:nAlcA HAS a LEAD.
The Island Holds Its Own In the
tfon of the Best Ruri ON Earth.

ton af the Best ERltA On
Run is the one thing in which no
,,lace can excel Jamaica. Ana
strange thing about it is that one Dig
estate will produce only common SUM-
while little one close by may ne mag
inc the very finest spirit possible at SIX
seven or eight shillings a gallon. ne
eouso seems 10 be from some difference
In the soil. But what that Is no man
can say. And here d planter mas 10
be his own engineer aud chemist j nc
wants to succeed.
As TO the cane plants themselves, we
cannot Irrigate them at Will, ana 80
bring them to the perfection TINT is
gained IN Peru. Still they do we'll anu
in some gullles, where the surface soil
Il wished down from the surrounding
higher ground, the canes have not Deeh
rcplanted within living memory.
Again, other large estotes always Heea
to be fresh planted after the second
cut
A great pest of the enne fields here IL
plant called eow-itcE. That is some
what like the scarlet runner, and IL
sheds from the outside of its pods n
down that causes acute pain. Should
cow-tch infest Il patch of cane TINS
brake must be burned TO prevent the
mischief spreading widely afeld.
Zone day." said our informant i
was riding through my fields AMI com
planned to a negress that one corner
was not sufficiently cleared Of the loose
leaves. She told me: Too much COW
itch in it. Not believing her, | got
down from my horse and lifted some of
the leaves myself. Heughl how they
stung! / could hardly keep from
showing the pain, so mounted again
and rode away again without a
word. But when got once out of sight,
down | jumped pretty sharp and
rubbed my hand well with earth"
This gentleman told me something
of the chinehona growth which Lad
been fostered here recently by the gov
/ ernment. 1t is known better under The
form of quinine at home, and is com
paratively new attempt, which so fal
has been only failure.
What of the sessel hemp, which has
also lately been introduced into th'
island p l queried.
81 fear our soil is too rich for it,
said the planter, thoughtfully. "Ml
own experience is that the sessel henl
thriyes best on the poor land; just Al
does our big aloe, here called 'maypole
by the people, because on May day theii
grandsires and grandams used t.
dance around it."-Cornhill Magazine
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
A COSTLY PERFUME.


And TO what use is ambergris put?
1t is an indispensable article with fine
perfumes, as it is used to give per-
maneney and lasting quality to very
feetiug scents. 1t is Il curious fact
that the keynote or basis of "nose-
gays" or bouquets as kerchief
odors are called, is not, as one might
suppose, the altar of garden flowers
nor the penetrating balsams-these are
Indispensable, but are not the ground
work. That basis is always one of
the four animal odors, / G., ambefgris.
musk, obtained from small musk deer
in Asia, eiyet, from the eiset cat, of
India. end castor, secretion of the
castor beaver, and now almost ebso-
lete in the perfume trade. The pure
and separate tinctures of any of these
odors is too intense and powerful to
be tolerated. Like all substances OF
these kinds, they must undergo a slow
decomposition till the remainder pos
sesses very little volatility. Even then
they contain a virtue which clings per
tinaciously to woven fabrics, and not
being solubes in weak, alkaline lyes. is
still to lie detected III the mfterial ftel
passing through the layatory ordeal
They aIe, therefore. of great value tc
the perfumer, and are the essential
foundation in almost every formula.
The essence of ambergris is obtained
by mixing three ounces of it with one
gallon of pure alcohol, and not till
after a month is it eady for use. This
however, is only kept for mixing, and
is far too strong. Only when t has
entered in minute proportion into the
bouquet does it produce those agree
able ond characteristic perfumes, the
effect of which upon the nerves of the
sensitive nose is much like the happ,
sensation produced by harmonious
mus cal chords on the delicate ear, OF
the perfect blending of colors to the ed
ucated eye.
As ambergris is the most costly OF
the basic perfumes, the bouquets cor
tanning it are the most expensive kinds
Boston Transcript.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
THE BURGLARS PARACHUTE.
London Cracksmen Adopt Aeronaut's De-
vice for Practical Use.


Burglary on scientific principles has
brought James Sanders, a ticket-of-
leave man, into great trouble. He was
not mere jimmy and-ladder man, but
Il student of aerostatics, and found out
that the best way Of dropping out Of
window was to do it la parachute,
for which purpose when he went a-bur-
Cling he carried large umbrella. This
he intended to open when he had
amassed his booty, drop gently to the
ground under its auspices and hurry
away with the parachute under his
arm, like a respectable family man
taking home the Sunday dinner.
His first experiment ON his newly in
vented plan took place the other even
ing in a house in Pimlico. Entry was
effected comfortably, and the articles
to be taken away were carefully ar
ranged in a parcel. Suddenly he fan
cied he heard noise. He rushed to
the window, parachute in hand, saying:
Now for the scientific departure, but.
unfortunately for him, in the hurry Of
the moment he forgot to open the UNI
brella before leaping and consequently
lost all the benefit of his scientific skill,
lie and his booty dropped into the area
with crash like any ordinary burglar,
much to the alarm of the occupant of
the Kitchen, who was sitting quietly
smoking a pipe after his weeks work
sanders was picked up in consider.
aoly damaged condition, reproaehing
himself for his absence of mind and la
menting his bad luck. A former exploit
On unscientific principles brought him
seven years penal service and a ticket
OF leave. The present may prove quite
as lucky. Mr.. de Rutzcn. the Westmins-
Ter magistrate, committed him for trial.
London Telegraph
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
RAT ENGINEERING
Curious Cases of Ingenuity Displayed
by the Rodents.

Some years ago as an east-bonnd col
lier was going up the Thames in Eng
land a basgeman gave warning shout.
and on looking over the side the sailor
saw a rat with lis head out Of a small
hele which il had gnawed in the side
of the ship. 1t was lapping The water
like dog The collier was beaehed al
once to avoid swapping. Il is probable
that the bursting Of one Of these sip.
ping places accounts for iae strange
stampede Of rats from doomed ships.
which forms a fixed tradition Of tue
sta.
4 curious ease Of rat engineering CO.
new meat market had been built N
Place street, and, though it was sur
rounded By wafer, the butchers (who
did not appreciate rats laid their
plans 10 exclude the whole tribe and
ration, and in case any should reach
their stands they resolved to head off
their march by making the posts IN
their stalls unsealable by rats. This
they effected by covering the posts
with zinc, and The butchers, looking
al the shining surface of the metal,
cnuekled at their victory. Bur they
reckoned without their host. The rats
got the meat. A Waterman posted in
the market called a butcher who came
carly on the scene to witness the meth
od. On stall hung two quarters of
leef and a leg Of mutton. The rats
spied them and found them unap-
proaehable. A general call for the ma
tion at large was evidently sounded,
as the rats came tlocking in, and an old
rat seemed to take command. There
were enough projections aud ineqaali-
ties 10 enable them TO reach the table
Of the stand, but how to scale the zinc
covered ioists was the task for the en-
giaeer corps to decide. Their plan was
soon formed. The rat army moved up
IN solid mass, he stout fellow in front.
On these climbed smaller and smaller
specimens, until a small rat mountain
rose. Then some of the rats climbed
to the summit and one raised himself
Oil his hind legs, resting his fofelegs
'Safhst ihc NihS. 1 htH auotuNt Siilib1u
up his back and, taking post on his
shoulder, assumed the same attitude;
rat after rat assembled the Jacobs lad
der, till at last one reached the cross
beam and scampered along il. y Whole
regiment followed ard the meat was
attacked, the engineers evidently aim
ing 10 drop dowa what they could for
the benefit Of the army. The onlook-
ers, however. were not disposed 10 let
them go too far. and, with all their en-
cheering skill, the rat army had 70
leave the field.-WoFld Of Science, i.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
a LITTLE NONSENSE.

Jack to friend on BICYCLE
whats your hurry; are you racing for
II train2" Joe-"No; I'm training for
raee."-Harper's Round Table.
Mamma" asked the little girl
peering in between two uncut leaves of
the magazine, chow do they ever get
the printing in there 2"-Chieago Trib-
une.
Miss Bobleigh says she dreamed
Of me-" said Willie Washington. TN
deed2" Yes. And she also says that's
the last minee pie she's ever going to
touch. Washington Star.
die didn't have the sand to pro-
pose, did he, Bessie?" Yes. but she re-
iected him. She said that while he had
the sand to propose, he didn't have the
rocks to marry.s-lIarper's Magazine
-Roaming Willy--aI read in a medi-
cal book to-day that it WIS unhealthy
for Teller to sleep in his underelothes.
Meandering Mike-"I'm mighty glad
desc I'm wearin don't belong ter me-
--Norristown Herald.
--He-"One thing is sure, have i'm
proved my wife's tastes since | married
her" She-'Well, guess that's right
She didn't have very good taste wher
she married you."--Yonkers States
man.
-Marie-"That actress says that she
always puts her diamonds on when sh'
takes bath. Do you suppose she il
afraid they will be stolen?" Hills
mo: it's force of habit with her
She's so used to putting them in soak
you know. Pioneer Press.
This unique specimen of a certifi
cate of death was rendered by NATIVE
apothecary at an inquest in India 1"
think she died or lost her life for wan
of food or on account of starvation, ant
perhaps for other things of her com
fortables, and most probably she dice
by drowning "-Household Words.
q am here, gentlemen" explained
the pickpocket to his fellow prisoners
las the result of :, moment of abstrac
ton" "And l." said an incendiary
because of an unfortunate habit o
making light OF things" and [,
chimed in a forger, ION account Off sim
pie desire to make a name for myself
"And l." added the burglar, through
nothing but taking an advantage of al
opening which offered in large mer
camille establishment in town." 3d
here the warden separated them.-Tit
Rite
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26

a natty c-spring buggy, built Tor two.
The turnout was hitched at the gate,
awaiting Mr.. Robertson's pleasure 1t
was noticing the ring that gave Father
Downing an idea.
Robertson. he said, in a friendly
way. lump into your buggy aud drive
down the road piece, and see haow
fur YOU KIN hear the Win
All right, sir responded Robert
son. IF one of the girls viii go with
Iae. You know I'm tolerable hard of
hearing
sNo. I didn't know it said The old
man. dryly: take one of the girls and
20 1ong-you won't hei fur tew 90,
most likely
s0ne Of the girls was a positive
stroke of genius. Those girls were
were all sharp as ferrets. and each
enc had pressing duties elseWhere-all
excepting Maud. who was at once nus
tied into the buggy by The others.
There Is d free masonry among young
people. a. potent as thai of the ancient
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
THAT BLESSED PuDeY IDOL.

The creature was a baby. and imagine may
be the youngster was
Bald headed, Just because II was so wise
It had "a glanse judicial. seemed TO acorn
things superficial. and reineaFnate
Socrates looked gravely from It's eyes.
It had TO suffer kisses from demonstratiye
young misses. # was euddled
Rugged aad rumpiod IN the most regardless
way.
And think the little wizard In is very Utmost
Rizzard was
Inclined to LOOK alth seofu upon such gush-
ing things as they
It would somstimes delgn to fralte be at sea-
sons melon collie, would
EatEine liselftu hoW-kuets without reason
ar eumman8.
And Inc vas ID ef1ued aud taealed with its
hsh=C vaize azsaaeklea,
Was a liflas exn1s5uoa le ne ROSTERS Of
he lala
Is provenaer s. rarlaas. is appetite preea-
rieas. As W. e.
auckiaa tAlars inside mystery obscure.
And wonder was is Plastic eardlun-piailea
and elastic
Way ofgettiag around eafahles with hanFine
movements sBre
II was sometimes Ike q aummF, sometimes
like living mummy,
Often Ike wheel gyrattng on pivot or q
point.
And It's quick baek-aetIon Hlang lng-swttty
rotating er lungiHg-
Seemed TO prove that ezch bone Ia Il was
tumbling toggle-ioint
Yet this Niigglesome yeuHg sinner was the
winsomest heart winner
Il was euddlesoms and hugEahle. a package
Of sweet Joy.
And II really didn't matter-aor could fact It's
value shatter-
Whether mamma's pOpsy -wopsy was little
girlor boy.
You cannot magnify 1.-THE vast treasure which
could buy it-for the
Baby is the monarch Of the nfeside and the
world.
And within that little cradle. hugginz bottle,
luck and ladie
Is the gem Of all the universe ia dreamland
snugly eurled.
L Edgar Jones. Ia Ram Horn.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
WIDOW BY GASFlxTURATlON,
she Told the Court That Her Husband
Died of That.

She was witness in a Minetta lane
stabbng case that was being tried in
the general sessions before Recorder
Goff. II
And did yodAsee What happeited
that night?e asked Assistant Uy.rict
Attorney Hennessy. a.
DO you mean when tn tall as1l man
cut de lady wifi his razor?"
YES said MIR. Hennessy Describe
how it happened
"Why, he just carved her VIII one
carve" answered the big negress.
"Welr,swhat led up to it? Didn't she
say something to him?"
"say somethin'!' exclaimed the wit.
ness. "Say somethin'! How kin lady
talk when her gurglin' vein is cut?
Why, you speak like yer were brought
up in de baekwoods."
"Where were you brought up?" asked
counsel.
"In Jackson's alley" answered the
witness. 81 were horned, married and
buried ma husband dere."
30 you are WHOM
Eyes, I'm widow! An I'm not a
snoozin' round for another man, either
One fool were nuff for me, tell yer"
"Was the man you married a fool?"
asked Mr. Hennessy
Look a-heah, lawyer, don't you think
a man what goes off an gasfxturates
hisself is 4 fool?"
what did he do?"
"Gasfixturated himself"
You mean asphyXiated himself" ex-
planned Mr.. Hennessy; "he turned on
the gas aud died of asphyxiation."
"GasfNturation," corrected the wit
ness; "afterward | made up my mind
I'D nebber marry de best man de Lord
made. No, indeed; when yer married,
nobody but yer husband will look at
yer; but If yer n single widow dc men
ies' chase yer round. An den IL yer
smack 'em in de jaw dey come back
next night wifi a present for a new in
terduction."
you're speaking OF the Africa Gus
tom" remarked the recorder; but they
don't end quarrels so lovingly among
the Spanish or Italians"
Look a-heah, icdge." said the wit
ness, I'm no Italian Don't take me
fo' no Spanish. I'm niger, dat's what
] am"
I'll apologize" said the recorder. as
the time for adjourning court had ar
riyed.-N. Y. Sun.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
TELL-TALE COAT COLLARS.
How Your Tailor Knows Whether You
Pay Your Bills.

Pay Your Bills.
The man VINO thinks he has the best
of his tailor had better take off his coat
and examine the tags under the collar,
where with great care the fashioner
of garments has sewn in. There let
him look at the stitching which binds
that iunocent-looking bit of linen to
the cloth. Let him then see wherher
the tailor is fool or not.
As surely as bad habits leave their
mark upon the countenance of the
wicked, so the willy fashioner of ward
robes has set his seal. The honest man,
;he beat, the slow payer, the schemer
and the dolt are known by the stitches
by their marks We shall be understood
or words to that effect.
The object of this new sartorial fancy
is TO enable knights of the shears 10 tell
at a glance whether you are good pay
or not. It's all in the threads, as it
were. Here is the key to these ingen-
ious tags of the tailor. The Jog
stitehis the one regularly used for good
customers, who require good work.
The criss-cross is significant of ow
pay. The stitch with dots and dashes.
which looks like the Morse alphabet,
tells the inquiring tailor that its owner
is a bad risk. The reverse dot stitch
shows the good fellow who wishca his
friends 10 dress wen, but hates like
thunder to pay. what they win finally
owe ON his introduction.
Tho round curves are used TO indieate
mean man, and the tag with convex
loop- at each corner is "a sure black eve
for the wearer. It's g. good scheme.
altogether The tailors think.-N y.
Womb
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26


order when they want TO bring things
out on the square.
Father Downing had no time to inter-
pose objections until the two were out
of hearing. bay Dick flying with them
down the road like streak OF shadow
IN the silver moonlight. West Robert
son held the reins taut in his right
hand, while his left arm stole about
Maud's trim waist, and two young
heads inclined innocently toward each
other, and if the fiddle squeaked they
did not hear it. What they did hear
was the music of the whole orchestra
Of love.
Meanwhile Father Downing sat with
his watch in his hand and timed the two
who were supposed to be doing their
whole duty as listeners. Hosea played
that violin as that instrument had never
been played before or since. If his play
ing was not noble and sublime like
that of the founder of his school. Il had
both audacity and excitement. His
musical feats on one string electrified
his audience. They were moved to tears
wien he gave them "5weet Home, and
"SuWanee River brought forth rounds
Of applause. Then Father Downing
again consulted his wateh-which he
had forgotten in his enthusiasm-and
stopped the music to say hastily:
Something has happened 10 them
twol / bet that horse has run away
The girls looked at one another.
They were frightened, and like their
father believed there had been a run
away But they eXonerated the horse.
In the moonlight and distance the
two lovers had crossed ten miles of ter
ritory, and neither had thought of the
violin. They had taken sweet draughts
OF pleasure from each others eyes, and
made up for lost time by exchanging
Condolences about their future. And
then Bay Dick turned into a lane that
led to house that was lighted as if for
company.
1t was the parsonage of the church in
that parish and the minister himself
stod in the doorway to welcome his
tullt-S bNNi II lliAOA llANNl
beforehand of the service he was eX-
pected to perform, and his wife and
daughter were on hand as witnesses,
and when his two visitors left he was
richer by liberal fee, and West Rob
ertson was possessed of wife. And
Bay Dick went back to the Downing
homestead as if he had wings to his
feet
The whole family and the visitors
crowded down to the gate, and Father
Downing, reassured by the safe return
of the truants, asked, sarcastically;
"Iaow fur could We hear Hosea play
IMP"
Clear to the minister's" said West
Robertson, as proud as you please, land
/ have the pleasure of introducing to
YOU my wife, and we both ask your for
giveness if we have done wrong"
"lIaow fur could We hear the vi'lin,
did We say?" drawled the old man.
And then Hosea, Jr.. came to the rescue
with what he called "chune' 70 the oc-
casion, which was a composite of
"IIaste to the Wedding" and several
other melodies. and his father was
"called off, and il he did not forgive the
lunaways he made no demonstration of
enmity. He had been fairly beaten in
love if not in war. He touched on the
subject only once more, and then it was
10 ask Robertson what "chune" Hosea
was playing when he heard him at the
minister's.
And Robertson answered, innoccntly.
at sounded like march. detroit
Free Press.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1898-03-26
PugnacInns nGainrs >.

In an Alabama town a storekesner
received from Florida friend q two
'oot alligator, which he put IN a ta,l,
IN his hack yard. A few weeks l,to,
he received another alligator from,
Louisiana, and then had luroe toni,
made TO receive both saurian, For =
time M went well, the gators rev,
rapidly. played with each other o,,;o
oily, and were a source of pride 70
their owner One day, hovcicr ,o,,,o
enc threw a piece Of meat i'm tho t,.I
and both animals seized it M ono
Immediately there was a Sight rbo
two alligators reared and rlawed .onL
other until the water was Owed ,.;,,
blood. The store,cepcr and D Is friends
pokcd the eombatants with polcs nus ,u.
they kept at it until the Louisiana ana 'lu'
gator succumbed Then the -.
proceeded to eat his adversarr bn+ ,, ~,
hauled out by The tail and prt ;r +Ss
small tank 10 cool f.-Goldso Ar, ''''