The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1898-10-14
MY ENGAGEMENTS
By LILLIAN QUlLLER.COUCh

AM convinced IN my own mind that
/ it is quite the right thing for
woman to be really very angry some
times. don't mean q raging, violent
| sort of anger that makes one untidy
| and flushed, but superior, discreet
| anger through which one can smile
| and talk and cause no damage to the
arrangement of ones back hair.
l myself have been very angry for
about two hours now, and the relief
| and satisfaction which l feel are in
describable. Two hours ago the draw
ing-room door opened to admit my
| cousin George, and, although l had
been In most placid and genial frame
of mind one moment before, all the
wrath which had been battened down
for the past 12 months blazed up in
side me before Jane had finished an
nouncing him-and smiled upon him.
1t was generally understood among
my friends and acquaintances and re-
lations that suffered secret and un-
ceasing pang of hopeless love after
my Cousin George changed his mind
and delcately refused the honor of
my hand, and perhaps the only ray Of
comfort which slanted my way came
from the inner knowledge, which !
might hug to myself, that 1t wasn't
true, that l had not q spark of hope
less love in me-that the only strong
feeling l had In the matter, and nat
urally enough, too, was the one which
found expression in the words Tut
tered quite privately to myself: "All
right. Cousin George, you just wait
bit! And l think I didn't look quite
them.
Of course, if l had been offered to
Cousin George. and he had not wished
to possess me, that would have been
| another matter. and l should have
been the last to blame him; but the
way In which he philandered round
and pestered me when he came home
from Heidelberg. nearly four years
ago, became more than joke, 1t be-
came absolutely absorbing. hadn't
even time to mend my frocks, for I
didn't like to bring whole shabby
skirt into the drawing-room. to bind
the bottom of it while he sat and
looked at me; SO I used to do silly
small things, such Us darning three
cornered rents in my pocket handker-
chiefs, where I had hitched them on
to the bushes, and such like-things
| should never have dreamed of do
Ing at all if he had not been there.
He proposed to me five times, which
thought pity each time he did it,
and his proposals used to make me
very hot and exhausted. They were
all made in June, and generally in the
sun cousin George never had much
idea of the fitness OF things), and SO
soon came to the end of all had to
say that l was at disadvantage, and
quite as uncomfortable, sitting there
and saying nothing; whereas Cousin
George seemed to be able to prattle
on forever.
l don't know why did 1t, but the
fifth time Cousin George grew Write
about the lips and finished up, rs
usual, by saying "Will you marry me,
FLOP" l said: "Oh, we'll. don't mind
If l do" And really, didn't mind.
for had known Cousin George for
years and years, and was very fond
of him. and felt that, at any rate,
it would put an end to his proposals,
and Aunt Theresa said that July was
going to be very hot.
Well. anyhow, whether II was right
or wrong. or stupid or sensible, said
straight out: "I don't mind If dot"
and then. of course, we were engaged.
| really did not mind it at all, for
knew Cousin George SO well, and he
knew me; and there was no bother
| about rearranging ones ideas and hab-
its. as some girls have to just to please
the man they're going to marry. I
used to look at him sometimes (when
he didn't happen to be looking at me)
and say to myself: "Well, to think
that that's the man I'm going to
marry!"-for II really did seem odd,
but wasn't at all upset about 1t, and
after awhile I decided that 1t was
really a most comfortable arrange
ment, and that 1t was probably an
nonsense that height Of bliss" apd
overwhelming happiness" sort OF
stun that some persons talk and write
| about.
was very matter of fact at first,
but when poor George chafed at that
! did my best to play up to my part.
| never could imagine why persons
couldn't go on just as usual, instead OF
sinking Off for tete-a-tetes. just like
silly children telling secrets; but
George seemed to like 1t, and by de-
grees got on capitally. really tried
hard to do as other engagedsgirls did.
| don't mean to say that had to try
hard because it was irksome to me,
| really did not object to 1t, only I
was apt to forget sometimes. How
J ever, In less than month broke my