The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1898-02-02

greater number of them should be. A
man who for the first time In his life Is
to be an usher at a wedding writes, or
gets an obliging sister to do II for him,
asking what fashion approves in mems
clothing for such occasions. And so It
goes.
From one point of view, all this IS
amusing. The manner of asking many OF
the questions sometimes makes the editor
that answers feel that his task is hope
less. more sympathetic and generous
view of life, however, invests these In
Quiries with a real dignity. Sincere the
inqulrors certainly are. The earnestness
indeed seems painful and out of all pro-
portion to those with whom knowledge
of the conventionalities began in the
nursery. The little things that mark
the conduct of wel-bred people havo be-
come so habitual to them that they have
ceased to realize how large a part they
play in social intercourse. These people
have always known just what was de-
manded of them on every occasion, and
they would be puzzled that any one else
should treat their easy knowledge as
of state Importance. In the truest sense
they are of great Importance. Tennyson
says:
Manners are not idle, but the fruit
OF loyal nature and of noble mind
-O--
Admitting all this, and even stating
that good manners are the protection a
| gentleman has against boor, it must be
| ADMITTED that as rule people pay more
| attention to mere conventional form
| than to the grace of style in speech and
| action. a man or woman may observe
| every dictate of fashionable etiquette and
| be neither q gentleman nor lady. Gently
| bred people are distinguished far more
| by their manner than by their manners.
i nn VsaN. y,sNN a~1aNr at
| quette. Their apparent inconsistencies,
indeed, sometimes puzzle onlookers.
Anyone can recall persons that now and
| then violate certain customs of society,
| and yet no one ever doubts their good
| breeding. If people in society followed
the regulations laid down in the aver
age etiquette book without intelligence
and variation, they would be as animated
and individual as fashion plates.
gentleman of wide social experience
| once characterized q young woman he
| had met as charming in her conversation,
adding that 1t was not what she said,
| but the way she said it. 1t was the
| way that constituted the charm. A
| study of manners as we have said is by
| no means to be despised. On the con-
| trary, II is to be encouraged But un-
| less some attention is bestowed on man
ner as well, the newly acquired manners
VIII seem like transplanted not native,
| Eraces. Manners without manner are
| the letter without the spirit. To say of
| a person that his manner is fine is in
| tinitely higher praise than to say that
| he has fine manners. Just what consti-
| tutes fine manner IL would be hard to
| say, but Difference is certainly part of
| it, 1t Is an interesting fact that one
| now and then meets neople that have
practically no social training, and yet
| have beautiful manner. Du Maurier
| speaks with admiration in 1.-THE Martian''
| of the manner of n fisherman. Manner,
| indeed is not dependent on social posi-
| tion.
The value of a fine manner can hardly
| be estimated. On the stage it gives a
distinction that adds a flavor to the
| highest art. In every walk in life it is
a protection against discourtesy. BY a
| courteous manner the clerk wins custom
| for his employer 1t Is a mistaken idea
that people that have a soft manner are
necessarily lacking in force. The hand CT
| iron is not less effective because it is in
| caSed in the glove of velvet. Suayiter
| in modo is not incompatible with fortite,
| in re. 1t has been truly said that there
Is no grace without force. Manners vary
| from one age to another. A fine manner
| is passport anywhere. A woman may
| know nothing of the minutiae of polite
| customs, and still be charming. In the
| natural order of things, manner and man.
| ners go together The very desire to i'm
| prove ones manners is the first sten
| towards that refinement whose flower is
| a fine manner.