The San Francisco call., 1898-12-22

well; while the last are doing business along Market, Kearny, Post and Geary streets. There are also some minor issues, which will develop later in the narration.
 It all came about in this way: MT. Stet- son is a stately gentleman of dignifed carriage, as becomes one of the solid citi- zens of this great metropolis. Therefore it is only meet that his broadcloth and immaculate linen should be topped with a glistening silk tile. A most imposing figure was that of MT. Stetson as long as he kept within his own bailiwick-that is, in the wholesale district-but when he invaded the retail precincts uptown it was different, and all because of those awnings that project over the sidewalks. NOW, awnings, properly adjusted, are of vast benefit to pedestrians as well as means of protection to goods displayed in store windows. But when they are permitted to drop down over the sidewalk like a nightshirt on a slack clothesline they are neither useful nor ornamental.
 MT. Stetson has met these awnings be- fore, to his discontinue and the muSSing of his hat, and there are several vows re- corded opposite his name to the effect that when he went uptown again he was going to take to the roadway. The VOWS might have held good had it not happened that the gentleman had no occasion to take to the bad lands again until last Monday, which was somewhat juicy. The awnings were temptingly set, inviting him under their sheltering folds, and in moment of weakness the vows were re- considered and MT. Stetson got out of the wet.
 Before he had gone block his hat had been brushed from his head by the avn ings and was a sight. MT. Stetson was in a rage, and boarding streetcar he went out and told his troubles to the Grand Jury.
 Those inuuisitors discovered that there is an ordinance-long since forgotten-re- quiring awnings, signs and similar ob- structions to be at least nine feet rom the sidewalks. Street Superlntendent Ambrose was sent for and notified to tear down every awning at once that was be- low the regulation height. MT. Ambrose instructed Deputies Alman, Maxwell and Bowen to carry out the mandates or the Grand Jury, and at 8 o'clock yesterday morning they began work. They did not tear down any offending canvases, but they notified the tradespeople along Kearny Market, Post and Geary streets that they must raise their awnings at once or they would be removed Almost every storekeeper on those streets was found to be an offender, ana they oa reserves of the ultimatum with various degrees or fortitude Some promised to remedy the evil at once and proceeded to do so, others declared their intention or tak1ng their time about it, while few made warm weather remarks about the Grand Jury and everybody else.
 The deputies experienced the greatest difficulty among the milliners and halr with the ladies. He tackled a hearny street milliner, but did not remain inside long, He came out looking red in the face and appeared to be apologtzing to a determined looking female. The avn ing was not disturbed. After that he shied whenever he saw woman in store Maxwell, too, seemed to pass the ladies by after bout with. pair of candy girls, so that duty fell upon All man, He got along all right until he went against the proprietress of a hair dressing establishment on Market street. The lady was fixing up the show window when AL that the awning in front of her store would have to be raised to nine feet above the sidewalk, and instantly he was sorry that he spoke.
 fully "You're Sam Rainey in disguise, but you can't do any politics here. That awning is fifteen feet from the sidewalk, and I shan't touch it; neither shall you"
 As the lady was not more than nine feet out of the way in her statement AL man said he was sorry for his mistake and escaped.
 One merchant on Geary street said San and declared his intention of moving; Market street bookseller threatened to report the Grand Jury to Chief Lees if any harm befell his awning, and ladies' furnishing goods dealer in the next block openly defied the deputies. Alman opened his pocket knife and was about to cut the awning down when the merchant weak ened and promised to have 1t raised at
 Superintendent Ambrose is determined to abate these nuisances, and in day or two he will send the deputies out again with positive instructions to tear down any awning that may be found below the regulation distance from the sidewalk No further notice will be served on the StorekeeperS.
 And thus is J. B. Stetson's ruined tile