Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1898-04-17

bands. and how they oftumes veer
around and fool the public 10 death. A
l2-year-Old WOman-yOu know they ma
ture at nowadays-has lofty ideas OF
her future consort She IS saturated with
fairy tales and the like. and while think
ing over matrimony when she ought 70
BIO studying elementary grammar she
decides that she'll wed Prince or
course. he must have millions, and ac-
cording to fairy-tale Prerequisites, should
wear silk dOublets and hose though TINS
latter requirement is severe tax ON
b0W-lceged royalty. At Is lass Will
begin TO realize that the crop Of princes
is unusually short nowadays. and at il
she Will be willing TO compromise on
Duke At 10. when the human flower may
be said TO be in fun bloom. she finds
men in general so agreeable that she
does not require royal blood as a condi-
ton precedent, but only demands q
man who is lawfully handsome and
worth two or three millions She viii
probably cling 10 this idea for two or
three years, ana until some day It daWns
upon her that her father, who Is pretty
good old chap, has never been able TO
make over $40 a month. The realization
Of this fact forces her to conclude either
that her sire is A mighty poor old rooster,
=
This matter may puzzle her, and the
possibilities are that shell make up her
mind to aim less high-tO compromise on
some "goOd-looking fellow with an hum
drtd thousand" She still clngs TO good
looks YOU observe. though at times IN
her experiences she is astonished 10
come across some very ugly fellows who
are decidedly clever and Akeable. Maybe
she viii be so pleasantly impressed that
H.. So. HrH.rr H
marry an ugly man worth an hundred
thousand, provided he isn't red-headed,
and provided. further, that he has q
mCustache.
Later she'll encounter an ugly fellow,
who has only fifty thousand, and no
mOustache. and he viii do u great deal
towards convincing her that no could
make her life happy. Just about the time
he thinks he's got her she'll bar him,
because his locks are slightly auburn.
and the next year, when some older
woman shows more sense and takes him,
she'll conclude she always did like blonde
fellows. In twelve months more her
heart tells her that she could cheerfully
go through life with even an ugly, red
headed man, who Lad twenty-five thou
sand and by the time she's "A, when other
women begin to PAIR Off, she reduces the
guarantee deposit 10 five thousand, ana
viii possibly excuse the suitOr II ne s.
ugly and red-headed, and even little
bit cross-eyed In fact, her scruples be-
gin To diminish so fast now that men
actually get shy about unburdening their
souls TO her Maybe. even at this late
GATE. she viii still prescribe certain re
Quisites, but she tells herself that II
sufficiently urged she might waive them
Possibly shGu stick out to the last that
she wouldn't marry Il man unless his
name were Reginald or Perciyal or Mont
morcucy or Kenneth or Archibald or
such like. But watch her. Just when you
conclude that her narrow views VIII ne
cessarlly make her a spinster, she an
nOunces 10 the astonished world that she
/ IS 20 become a bride. Inquiry elicits the
! fact that she IS TO wed a red-headed
! man, variOusly known as william and
Buck" and that the prospective groom
/ has eyes which are at variance with one
another, and that his salary is only $3.50
per week. This IS the woman who at u
/ intended 10 marry Prince.
!
| Wen do l recall the palmy days OF my
| own gilded youth, when the whole air WAS
! redolent with the perfume OF my hair
! Oh, and the creak Of my new shoes could
/ be heard from Bacon Quarter Branch 10
! Sheep tlill. In those days the present
| mmander-in-Chief then a lass Of ten
/ der years. who thought il clever TO squcal
/ and be sktt,sh. positively and firmly de
! chned TO be moved by my matrimonial
| ovcrtures. Neither the wilderness of my
! paper collars nor the lustre OF my neatly
I polished raw-hide boots could move her.
and she would have none OF me" Gas
| Shakespeare and the old-time boys. ex-
| press 10. She swore that none but bru-
! nette. with SOFT brown eyes and small