The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1898-06-16

ing, and wish you'd excuse me from
duty"
What duty are you detailed for?''
Guard"
@What appears to be the trouble?"
"Well, I've headache, and pain in my
stomach"
What have you been eatingg"
"Nothin' much"
Nothing much? Did you eat your
breakfast yesterday morning."
Yes, sir.
"And what did you eat between that
Rnd dinner.?"
''Nothin' much. Only a half a water
melon an piece o pie"
land what did you drink"
"Nothin' much. Only two glasses o.
FED lemonade and bout three cups o
water"
did you eat any dinner"
''1es, sir"
"And anything between dinner and sup
per-"
pie, an some crackers an cheese"
"What did you drink?'
'N-e-l-l, my bunkey he he'd sum Ticker
an we TUX a drink o that"
''Did you eat any supper; if so, what?"
"No, / didn't feel like eatin' much sup
per, so ] only eat sum bacon an beans,
an pertaters, an sum bread, an drunk
sum coffee.
'"What did you eat and drink after sup
per-"
well, one o. the boys an me, we
had a watermelon, an then bought the
lemonade"
"Well, you didn't eat or drink 'nothin'
much but you made your stomach a
slop bowl for great deal of trash.
Steward, give this man good large dose
OF castor oil. And" Ito the mani you come
back at noon and tell me how you feel,
and in the meantime don't eat what you
call 'nothin' much and nothin' much
will trouble you by tomorrow"
He had been delivering beer in that part
of the CITY adjacent TO some OF the numer-
Gus camps, and had disposed OF nearly all
his load, and left his team standing with
out watching, while he gossiped with a
friend of the gentler sex, at a window not
far from the street. But, taking adj
vantage of his carelessness, the team
started for home, and soon were putting
country behind them as rapidly as was
possible. Crossing the track OF street
railway, they unloaded three kegs of beer
very quickly, and almost as quickly they
were found by some passing soldiers. The
case was one in which possession was
nine points in law, with the truth in doubt
and not counted.
A huge tin cup was soon reduced, and
attempts made TO Stake a deep thirst.
But policeman who put in an appear
ance about that time attempted To stop
he replied that he was not allowed to
drink while on duty.
'EBilly take that club, and relieve that
man for five minutes" and before he had
time TO object the guardian of the law
found himself disarmed, and the despOiler
brandishing the club TO enforce his order
10 Drink"
BY the time he had emptied the quart
cup las he was forced to do) second
SQUAD appeared on the scene, and when
told of his performance, declared they did
not believe it, and would not, unless they
saw it done.
Protests were vain. He was friend of
SQUAD No. !, who were well-known as
gross preVaricators, and the only way TO
save their credit for yeracity on the pres
ent occasion was 10 give ocular proof Of il
by repeating his feat. 1t was finally down,
but with many a stop and long drawn
breath.
BY the time No. 2 had moistened its
own clay by pouring liquid into its hollow,
No. 3 came in sight and seeming the
spoil. came for a share. Told of the alb
insisted, with many dire threats, that
seeing was believing, and that they want
ed proof. C
The full cup was again presented, a re-
sounding thwack of his own badge of
office on his shoulders caused him TO
begin a struggle with another measure.
A pause for breath, and the order Keep it
up, and put 'er down." emphasized by an
appraised arm, was scarcely forcefui
enough 10 compel obedience.
Before the vessel was emptied, however,
the provost guard appeared on the scene,
and the whole party OF soldiers was soon
in the guard tent. How the policeman
explained matters to his chief has not been
disclosed.