The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1898-07-09
NEVADA.

.Jack-A woman can't throw straight.
l don't know. Did you ever
have one throw you down!-New YORK
Journal.
He-It makes me a better man every
time l kiss you. darling. She-oh' liar
old. how good you must be now!-Bos-
ton Traveller.
Timmy-Pop, II there's a war are
you going? Pop-NO, SIR. FOUR mother
has been the mar OF the house for the
past year.-Lfe.
Sunday School Teacher-Why is 1t
wrong to have two wives? Tommy
Cos no man can serve two masters
New York Journal.
Everything on earth has Its mis-
Sion" How about mosquitoes "rhey
make us thing more kindly Of flies
IPhlsburg Chronicle.
Zones thinks a great deal of me-
$50? l didn't know you e such
friends" "We're not; l owe him mon
ey."--Menphls Appeal.
Little Clarence-Pa, Is there really
"honor among ~thievesT" Mr.. Callipers
No, my son; thieves are just as bad
as other people.-Puck.
Hell suppose the chalnless wheel Is
lfastf She-I suppose so. wonder
4,dw long 1t will take 1t to reaeh the
bargain counter.-Puck.
His Ideals the water yod get at
your boarding house puref EgDert-
No; there seems to be a lot OF milk In
lG-Yonkers Statesman.
Jack-Yes. ancestors certainly help to
give a person social prestige. TONES
pecially when they are wealthy ana
one lives with them.-Life.
Quick Work.-Jones-I married my
wife a month after she accepted me.
Brown-And | married mine three days
after she refused me.-Puck.
From Two Points of ~yiew.-Minnie
l(admiring her new ring)-Isn't 1t n a
little thing? Jack (who bought hl-in-
deed 1t is!-Jewelers' Weekly.
Mrs. Ferry-Are your new nesghbors
welltodof Mrs. TerryL think they
are. The children have such awfu
mamers.-Cinclnnati Enquirer.
81 Wish to establish a fine private IL
hrary. What book Is the best TO start
on p 81 would advise a pocketbook."--
philadelphia Evening Bulletin.
Watts-Newspaper English Is getting
worse every day. Potts-Why not
The offices are filing up with college
graduates.-Indianapolis Journal.
Charles Bragg-Yes, Miss Brightly, II
costs me ten thousand a year to live.
Miss Brighdy-Oh, Mr.. Bragg, do you
think it's worth it?-Boston Traveller.
shortleigh-My Uncle Frank is a YER
stable Klondike. Longlelgh-Why'
how's that? Shortleigh-Plenty OF
wealth, but cold and distant.-Chicago
News.
He Wouldn't Do.-Friend-Wouldn't
YOU like 30 have me sit here and shoot
at the poets when they come lnf Editor
No. You are too poor a shot.-Har'
lem Life.
She (reading)-Mlce are fond OF mu
sic and will get as close to 1t as they
can. He-Just cut that out and II
send 1t to the girl In the next fiat.-Yon
ikers Statesman.
Seems to Cover It.-Hojack-Give m
4 paraphrase of "All Is fair in love ant
war" Tomdik-The tactics permissible
in COURTS. p are equally allowable af
ter marriage.-Puck.
she-Your face Is too nea to mine
HeIts two inches away; and that
as bad as a thousand miles. She (pout
inglyeWeli. 1t wouldn't be for Som
men.-Harlem Life.
Btggs-What did she say when sh
rejected you? Griggs-She said
wasn't necessarily due to lack Of meri,
but on account Of the great pressure o
other material.-Life.
Jake Fell0wsI have a great MOTTO
to kiss you. Miss Sweetlips (giancin,
In the mirror)-Well, sir, to be fran
with you, l couldn't blame you much
New York Evening World.
Aunt Maria-Why, Johnny, what |
the world are you thinking about
Johnny-Only thinking up things to sa
when | grow up that / used to do wheI
was a boy.-Boston Transcript.
Mrs. Higgins-What wretched tast
that Mrs. Wilkes has, Mr.. Higgins
Yes. l met her down stairs this after
noon and she was wearing that ugl
Ia cox hot Won thou0ht vo,, xuapfad
Chicago News.
1--WE English" said the intelllgen
foreigner, do not run for office; W
stand for it." "And here said tn
bright American, 'the mar u n for OF
fee II the people will stand for it,
indianapolis Journal.
Adelbert-I cawn't say that I'm feel
ing nachuwal this eve: I've got
beastly cold In my head, don'tyerknow
Geraldlne-Never mind, Addy. Don
grumble. Even II II Is only a cold, IL
somethlng.-Richmond Dispatch.
what a beautiful specimen OF In
laying" exclaimed the guest. "Yes,
replied Mr.. Cumrox, as he put his hand
behind and tiptoed eomplacently; .'bu
that Isn't anything. You ought to havl
seen the outlay 1t represents."-Wast
engton Star.
The Cautious One-I wouldn't go I
the Kiondlke. Already more none
mas gone in there than has been take
out. The Sanguine One-You don't say
If the place Is getting richer like that.
think III go as soon as l can.-Cincli
nat Enquirer.