The Holly chieftain., 1898-02-18
THE T,DY HUSBAND.
He il Evcn More Exaspesating Thaa
the One Who Il CAKelena.

He i lsven More ExasperatinE TAan
the One who IL Careless.
is there anything more trying on this
iarth than tidy" husband-that is to
say the man who thinkx himself the
very pink Of perfection, Ms FAR as neat
ness goes, and yet Tho hns absolutely
no idea OF orderlinness? His own
belongings, clothes, pipes. books, ETC..
| are allowed TO lie all over the house,
and an attempt to put these in their
right places brings down a torrent Of
gi umbling on his wife.
why cannot she mind her own busi-
ness? Is nothing private from wom-
ans prying and curiosity? Let her
confine herself to her own duties, which
would certainly be improved by little
niore care" etc.
But other peoples untidiness-uh!
that is theme upon which he is never
weary Of talking and periodically he
has fits of tidying up ut home, where
life. for those in the house, Is one long
weariness.
| Then nothing is private from his pry-
ing and curiosity; books and papers are
carefully sorted out and put back in the
wrong places; those which his wife has
especially laid by for future reference
IRE either tied up with the waste paper
to be sold or sent out to the Kitchen
to be burned; letters are torn up in
discriminatory, whether they are an
swcred or not; the cupboard shelves
are packed with lot of rubbish which
is really useless, and which was only
Whiting an opportunity to be got ria
of; and for the next few weeks con-
fusion reigns supreme; nothing cnn be
found when it is wanted because every
thing has been put just where IL
shouldn't be.
When he has tired of making him
self thoroughly Objectionable down
stairs, he goes upstairs and turns out
| ali his boxes and drawers, and-leaves
them; for his fit of tidincss does not
last sufficiently long to allow of his
reducing the muddle he has made tc
neatness; that is for his wife to do
later on.
With duster. too, he goes about
which don't exist, and piece of string
and a reel of cotton out of place APP
parently causes him agony and is the
subject of n long homily on .'the amount
of rubbish which is allowed to uccumu-
late unless there is some one TO take
an interest in the house."
There are generally premonitory
symptoms to warn the obseryunt wife
that the fit is coming on-a restless I'M
easiness, an nimless moving of the orna.
rnents on the mantel piece md the re-
iterated question: where is that
hook Tor that paper) that was read
ing?" He sighs frequently. too-a sigh
of weariness and hopelessness. as of q
man who battles unsuccessfully with
the faults and fittings OF others; his
face wears wearied and heartbroker
expression, and little frowns appear on
his forehead. lie refuses to make or
join in any lengthy conversation, Talk
ing only in snatches, and then on the
most gloomy subjects; he even heave'
against his faporite pipe, which refuse.
to draw" and he spoils six mntche.
for every one that he lights; and by thu
next morning his maiady is fully de
veloped and as soon as breakfast !,
over he begins to tidy up"
But although one may see the out
break, it is difficult TO know just hov
to check ii, and indeed it is often wis
to accept it as an inevitable discomfort
There are so many worse cranks which
h. might take up, and, ns we are al
supposed to be slightly mad on one sub
ject at lenst. mania for tidiness-ir
other peoples al most hurmes'
idiosyncrasy.
II the fit threatens to be very bat
one it may be rendered less severe Dy
extra sweetness and kindness of man
ncr by an excellent dinner or the judi
cious Leading of the thoughts in another
direction.
Or the wife may anticipate her hus
band and have II ''tidying up" spell OF
her own account. The bustling about
the extra dust-which can always b'
raised If one goes the right way tS
work-with few gloomy references t.
IL good clean up" will usually SO tir'
him out that he will be only too glat
to allow things to stay as they are, thai
h" may enjoy u little peace and quiet
ness.-Philadelphia Times.