davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
AN OPEN LETrEa TO ,MoTHCRs.

AN OPEN LETTER TO Iii OTHERS.
 We are asserting In tine courts oiIr right to tht exclcSive use Of the word CASrORIA," and "PIrcHER'S cASroKIA,' '' as our Trade Mark I, pr. Samuel Pitcher. of Hyannis Massachusetts wasthe originator of a PITCHERS CAsroRIA," the same that has borne and does now bear tht fac-simile signature of cHAS. II. FLETCHER on every wrapper. This is the original " PITCHERS CAsEoRIA" which has been used in the homes of the mothers of America for over thirty years Look Carefully at the wrapper and see that it is Ae kind ,0H haVe a!zoa1s 6OEghf, and has the signature of CHAS. H. FLETCHER on the wrapper. No one has authority from me to use my name except The centaur Company of which Chas. H. Fletcher is President.
 Afarch 6, LS07. sAMUEI. PITCHER, MD
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
What Is StYle2

The fact that we use the word "style'' in speaking of architecture and sculp- ture, painting and music, dancing, play acting and cricket, that we can apply it to the careful achievements of the housebreaker and the poisoner, and to the spontaneous animal movements of the limbs of man Or beast, is the noblest of unconscious tributes to the faculty of letters. Morals. philosophy and as- thetic, mood and conviction, creed and whim, habit, passion and demonstra- tion-what alt but the art of literature admits the entrance of all these and guards them from the suddeIness of mortality All style is gesture, the ges-
 ure of the mind and of the soul Other gestures change and fit; this is the ul-
 innate and eEdul ing revelation oS per
 Gnality. -'Style. Ey Walter Raleigh
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
A Mean Dog.

He was small boy-not such very small boy-in an out of town school He had written composition. It was upon the subject of dogs. Now the teacher of the school was a man, and he wGs not popular He WIS what tho boys called mean They disliked him thor oughly, from the tips of his shining shoes to the ends Of his pompadOur comb cd hair L- the composition there was q story of % dog It was Che story Of a very mean dog and as the composer Of the literary etOrt came to the last line he read it emphatically and with great distinctness of utteIance, and the hearts of all the other small boys in the room, as they listened, quaked, half with de- light and half with fear. knowing what was to follow, and gazing, fascinated, at the upright cOiffure of the master, as the reader ended, And that dog was so mean that his hair stood on end ''-- New York Times.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
4 Long Felt Want.
Bright-I've got an idea that will be worth millions if I succeed in perfect fu0 if

W-tE5t-Wh That JAr scns-He? Brigbt-A smOkeless cigarette -CLl- oago Eeyve.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
The Original Organ Grinder.

When barrel organs, once the usual accompaniment of the magic lantern, came into use, a native of the province of Tende was one of the first who tray eled about Europe with this instrument
 In his peregrinations he collected money enough to enable him to purchase from the hing Of Sardinia the title o4 count of the country where he was bOrn for which, probably, in a time of war h. did not -ev above !. 900 eui-cas.
 With the remainder of his money he purchased an estate suitable to his rank and settled himself peaceably for the remainder of his days in his mansion.
 In the entrance hall of his dwelling he hung up his magic lantern and hls organ facing the door, there to be care- fully preserved till they moldered to dust, and he ordered by his will that any one of his descendants who should cause them to be removed should forfeit his inheritance and his patrimony revert to the next heir, or, in failure of sue eessor, to the hospital of Tende.
 Only few years ago the organ and lantern were still to be seen carefully preserved. Pearson s Weekly.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
KLONDIKE.

The cold is as bitter in many sections of our Western country as any freezing corner of Klondike, Twenty degrees below zero is not an uncommon condition of winter weather, and by reason of this intense cold, rheumatism has its best chance to grow painfully intense and chronic in its cOn- tinuance. We need not, therefore, borrow an idea of cold from Klondike. What we want is the best cure for rheumatism, and anywhere and everywhere, whether in freezing cold or melting heat, St. Jacobs Oil is known, valued and used as the Mas ter Cure of this universal plague of man. kind. The proof of its efficacy can always be produced, and it's efficacy in the cure of the disease goes on in all conditions of weather.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
South Africa,s Curse.

The South Africa cOlonists have got rid of their lions and elephants, but they have not yet been able to get the
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
THE FLARBY BUNDLE.

Experience of Doctors Wife Who
 Disliked the Profession.
 The wife of a welI-known physician tells an amusing story of one of her early experiences soon after her mar riage.
 'When was a girl" she said, T had the greatest dislike of the medical pro fession, and always said that would never in any circumstances marry doctor; and, of course, it was my rate to fall in love with a medical student who was simply absorbed in his profes- sion.
 @After a long enga cement, during which time Dr. s. had graduated, and esta blished fairly good practice, we were married, and I moved to my new home, where there was quite a four ishing medical college, the head of which was an intimate friend of my husband. My dislike of the profession in general still continued and, when ever the two men were shut up in the library together, 1 always imagined that they were discussing horrors as I fiippantly called the scientific re searches.
 "One afternoon, when pr. s. was off on his rounds, a small boy presented himself with a curious-looking oblone package, with my husbands name on the wrapper. 'Dr. B. sent this,' said the imp, and I was to say 1t oughter be put on ice iWmediatelE.
 '>'Good gracious I thought, what is that dread dfuI Dr. B. sending 10 my hus- band WAl~- ~-ursftc TO DC put on Ice at onceY And as I took the package 1 felt a thrill of instinctve terror run through my frame, for 1t was not firm and comfortable like an ordinary bun de, but felt 1abby and yielding. Like a human arm! I suddenly thought; and, with a cry of fright, dropped the thing on the hall floor
 My first impulse was to call one of the maids; but, rallying myself and feing ashamed of my silly imagination, approached the long hateful-looking package, which nevertheless possessed a sort of horrible fascination for me.
 with shrinking fingers picked it up by the cord which was around it and carried 1t over to the table; and then growing bolder, How absolutely silly I am,' said to myself, as If Jack would have legs and arms sent to him in this casual fashion, Taking out a hairpin-that universal woman's i'm plement-I scratched little hole in one ened of the bundle.
 Horror of horrors, 1t was flesh! 1 gave loud screech, which brought the two maids and my husband, who had just driven up, all on the scene; and then I distinguished myself by going off into my first and only attack of mysteries. After much difficulty Dr. S. ascertained the cause of my fright; then he opened the susplcious-Iooklng bundle and held up before my mort- fed vision an uncommonly fine fish. The hole had made in the paper just happened to expose the smooth flesh like portion between the gills and the eyes"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Sad AIisuuderstaudia@.

Ut was all ] could do to keep from laying violent huuds Oh h,m. said the keeper of the high class cafe as the pale young man departed. "The idea of his calling this place a beanery!"
 "He meant to pay you a compli- ment, said the listener. Are you not aware that he is Bostonian?'-Cin- oinnati Enquirer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
SHAKE INTO YOUR SHOES.

Aliens Foot-Ease, powder for the feet It cures painful, swollen, smarting feet anC instantly takes the sting out of corns and bunions, It's the greatest comfort discov cry of the age. Aliens Foot-Ease makes tight-fighting ornew shoes feel easy. It is a certain cure for chilblains, sweating, damp callus and hot, tired, aching feet. We have over 10, 900 testimonials of cures. Try stores. By mail for 25c. in stamps. Trial package FREE. Address Allen s. Olmstsd Le Roy, New York
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
A Great Find.

Lady of the House (to servant girl applying for a situation)-You were ir the service of my friend, Baroness K. Why were you sent away?
 Servant-Please, ma am, for listen ing at the doors.
 Lady-Ah, then I will take you, only you must promise to tell me all you heard. London Fun.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

they have not yet been able to get the better of the balloons. 4 baboon, al though somewhat like a dog. has all the mischievousness of man. It is the ugliest animal in ,aIl creation The Boers call him AdOnis and never des- lgnate him under the official name that has netu given D lfC- lv science. <Dyr. .nis creature IS tue curse or the Cape Colony. He commits depredatiOns for the love of the thing. Any impudent tomcat that ventures too far away from home is sure to be captured and strangled for fun by a baboon. Near ly all the Angoras, the choicest and most costly animals imported by the colonists, have been destroyed by these huge monkeys. Even the dogs share the same fate. The bravest and most breeds are unable to cope with adver- saries armed with just as powerful jaws and with the immense advantage of having four hands instead of four paws. With deXterity that conspic- ously exhibits its surgical aptitude, the baboon bleeds his enemy in the throat and in less than a minute the duel ends in the death of the dog. One of the principal amusements of these big monkeys is to gambol around the wire fences that protect the tame ostriches just to terrify them. The panic among them is so great that they often break their legs in their wild rushes. This is pastime which the monkey seems to enjoy hugely. A broken leg for an ostrich means a death sentence.-Paris Figaro.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
THE GOVERNMENTS DOMAIN.

The commissioner of the general land office has submitted his report to the Secretary of the Interior. Compared with last year, it shows decrease of ], ,298 homestead entries az egating 578,625 acres. Quite propOrtionate to no effort is made to reform irregularity of the bowels. This can easily be accomplished with the aid of Hostetter's Stomach Bitters, also q remedy for malaria, dyspepsia, rheumatism and liver trouble
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
THEY DON'T LIKE PAPER.
Savages at First Contact Regard the Fabric
 With Suspicion.

Savages at First Contact Regard the Fabric
 With Suspicion. When savage people first come in CON- tact with the whites, none of the won- ders that they see is regarded with more suspicion than large sheets of paper. The native is apt to regard paper as a sort of cloth, and the fact thaA it tears easily and is worthless for most of the purposes to which cloth is put convinces him that it is fraud.
 One or two Kongo travellers told of the disgust with which the natives at first regarded paper. The Kongo tribes. by the way, are on the lookout for sharpers, and it is exceedingly hard work for anybody to sell them bad quality of cutlery or cloth. Savages soon find, however, that paper is not in- tended to serve the purposes of cloth. Then they cease to look upon it as fraud, but they do not think it ranks high among white man S manufactures, and they have little use for it.
 Some time ago well known explorer was travelling in the interior of Queens land, Australia, where he met many natives who had never seen white man before.
 One day crowd of natives was in the white man IS camp carefully inspect ing the explorer and his baggage when a newspaper happened to drop out of his pocket.
 : The natives uuf0lded and spread 1t ! cut on the ground. They decided th4v 4 must be an article of wearing apparel, ali1 ol-, off ttl,.o-1 tried IL un. lie wrap l ped 1t round his shoulders like a shawl and sat down on the ground, arranging l his covering this way and that and watching the faces of the crowd to see what they thought of his elegant gar ment, covered as it was with many l thousands of curious marks.
 Presently, however, an accident hap pened. While the savage was rearrang- ing his shawl and trying to bring the corners together in front of him the gar ment began to tear at the nape of his neck. A howl from tho crowd called at tention to the disaster. The blanket, or whatever it was, was evidently made of the poorest sort of material.
 The savage took his covering off, ex- amined the mischief he had wrought, made the tear a little longer and then with his finger poked hole through the paper.
 That settled the fact that the article was worthless. The newspaper sudden ly lost all interest for the natives, who turned their attention to less destructi- ble objects Pearson Weekly.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
MOderuizeJ

Hurry and clean up before dinner, Henry" urged Mrs. Wheeler.
 Now, twenty years ago husband so addressed would have washed his face and brushed his hair, but MT. Wheeler didn't. He rushed out into the twilight and cleaned his wheel.-Judge.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
The Difference.

Mrs. TT am worried because my husband is keeping something from me, and don't know what it is.
 Mrs. S.-My husband, too, is keep Ing something from me, and am wor- ried because I know what it is.
 Mrs. T.-Indeed! What is it?
 Mrs. S.-It is money.-New Orleans Times-Democrat.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
LET US ALL LAUGH.
JOKES FROM THE PENS OF
 VARIOUS HUMORISTS.
fleacant Incidents Occurring the World Over-Sayings that Are Cheer fuI to Old or Young Funny Selections that You Will Enjoy.
Not an Appropriate Adaoe.

Wursted-The old skinflint who owns that clothing store on the corner, is q rank, unmitigated fraud and swindler.
 Hursted-Whats wrong now?
 Wursted-Look at the condition of this overcoat that bought of him; and I've only worn 1t a week
 Hursted-Well, that doesn't justify you in calling him names. You know the adage says Never judge man by his clothing"
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Not Good Boarders.

Landlady-Are you a bicyclist?
 Applicant for Board-Not |; never was on a wheel in my life and never want to be.
 Landlady-I only asked, you know, because the men who ride bicycles are such eaters, and then they take so much exercise that they look as though they were starving to death.-Boston Transcript
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Beginning to Take Notice.

John-So you really think you have some chance of winning her, do you?
 Henry-Oh, yes; I feel quite encour- aged. She has begun to find fault Wlln my yIooks.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Hal Hal

Yeast-Pve just invested in one of those salt and pepper suits.
 Crimsonbeak-We that sounds as If it would be good for at least two sea- SOnS.-YOnkerS Statesman.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Educating | Inn.

Maglstrate-The gamekeeper declares that he saw you taking this pheasant. What have you to say to that?
 Prisoner-I only took it for lark.
 Magistrate-SiX months for making such an pathological error.-Tit-B Bits.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Had Looked Them Over.

Mistress-Bridget are there any let ters for me this morning?
 Bridget-Only two postal cards, ma'am, but there's nothing of import ance in them.-Fliegende Blaetter.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Pana,s Unconcern.

Masilda-Have you spoken to papa?
 Bertie--Yes. I asked him through the telephone, and he answered, "I don't know who you are, but it's all right. ''-Pick Me Up.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
A Side IufereSf

"Where is your son RobertY' ''IIe's the left half-back of the Cone yale football team"
 Then he's attending collegeY "Yes, incidentally" y."-Cleveland Plain dealer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
[,ittIe Girl-Four hours.
Danger in the Ball Room,

"What a beastly cold you have got, Saml Where did you get it?"
 "IFs not q cold; it's hay fever. ! got It dancing with that grass widow the other uight."-Punch
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Women Preachers in America.

There are more than POO ordained women preachers in the United States, not including the numerous colored preachers of that sex.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
According to Darwin

Slmkins-SOftleigh Is trying to trace his genealogical tree.
 .Timkins-I'll bet he will find a mon key on one of the branches.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

After a woman becomes widow, she begins to say a great deal about her extreme youthfulness when she mar ried.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Her Reasoning Was Excellent.

"Oh, yes, had any number of young men hanging around me when was girl"
 Then don't see why you picked out your present husband"
 "He happened to be the only one that suggested marriage. ."-Cleveland Plain dealer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Vice Versa.

"Now that she's married I suppose she belongs to an old family"
 If she paid what she Is said to have paid the old family ought to belong to her. r."-Detroit Journal.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

ETC Permanently Cured No fits or nervous lIIS ness after first days use of Dr. Kline's Great Nerve RestOrer, Send for FREE $2. .OO trial bottle and treatise. DR. R. H. KLINE, Ltd 930 Arch St Philadelphia. Pa.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Wearing Stockings,

MT. TrOuble-You say that men are haSder on their stockings than women. How do you make that out?
 Mrs Trouble-Because women wear -hc;~ stocl-:c-~ longer. T7~-+o- Date.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Royal Residence in Ireland.

The Prince of Wales Is quite favor able to the establishment of royal residence in Ireland.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
His E.aar.r-s.

"Did he leave Is wife much when he died?'
 Well, doU't know as to that, but he used to leaye her about every night
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
IT'S NOT EXPENSIVE.

Its the quality that's high in TEA GARDEN DRTPs, 'ToBoGGAN MAPLE SYRUP and PELICAN LOUISIANA MoLAssEs. For said by frst-class groeers in cans only. Money refunded if goods are not satisfactory. Don't accept an Imitation See that tho manufacturers name Is ltho
 THE PACIFIC COAST SYRUP co.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Related Convict.

Prison Missionary-What are you in for, friend?
 Convict (bitterly)-Just for missing train
 Nonsense
 "No nonsense, sir. I missed train for Montreal. ''-Harlem Life.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Her HCaIIiugO

The Perfect Lady-Dear mel I have been so busy making calls all day that l am nearly prostrated.
 The Other Perfect Lady-Calling ''cash," I presume.-Indianapo Jour nal.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
An Instance.

First Tramp-You're the worst ever see. You won't believe thing unless you see it.
 Second Tramp-Oh, yes, I will. know I have a terrible thirst, but can't see it.-YonkerS Statesman.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Very Much So.

'Did you notice while in Italy," said one traveller to another, that the chill dren along the roads near the Eternal city turned somersaults for you as you passed, In the hope that you would throw them some of your superfuous coin!'
 'Yes, indeed" was the reply. T thought it very Rome antic." c."-Up-to- Date.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
But He Can't Read Her Mird.

Simkins-The X-ray will be of great benefit to the average man.
 Timkins-For instance?
 Simkins-With It's aid he will now be able to see through a woman's ways.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

AFTER being Swindled by all others, send us stamp for particulars of King SolomOns Treas MASON CHEMICAL CO.,, P. O. BOX 747 PHILADELPHIA, PA.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

Some men act like hogs, and there are others who do not need to act
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

T want to advertise for a sort of gen eral manager, who must know the minutiae Of my business" said the cit izen. Hell have to be honest, too. Juct fix it up for me, will you?"
 "All right, MT. Willix," said the ad. writer, and this Is the way 1t appeared:
 "Wanted-At Willix's emporium, an all-rOund man who must be entirely square" e."-Cincinnati Enquirer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

Balmoral is a greatly larger estate now than it was when first it became a royal residence. To the original 10, 00C or 1000 acres were soon added tn. 5000 acres of the adjoining Birkha estate. Then in 1878 the forest of Iln lochoule was purchased GOO aores-aud there haze since r. more recent acquisitions
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
SNw1nafhN

CaTuc-Ihere goes MISS Serely auI her oissipated fiance. She says she is going to marry him to reform him. Fanny thing. suppose she can't get any one who doesn't need re- form?
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Not the Correct Thing.

Signal Service Man (meeting dyspep- tic acquaintance)-Fine day, Jones'
 Jones-Oh, don't talk shop!-Chi- cago Tribune.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
His Life Was Not Insured.

Country Girl-Papa is going to Kill hogs this afternoon.
 Sensitive Gentleman guess I won't stay.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
And the Band Was pIo

Jack-Say, old man, your silk hat looks deucedly shabby this morning
 Tom-Yes; I was out all night and f. lost its nap.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
Philosophy.

''If man do not work" said the gen. tleman with the good clothes and the dignifed expression, 'he shall not eat"
 T don't find 1t 'zactly that way" said Perry Patetic, but I know if my stories don't work I don't eat."-Cin- cinnau Enquirer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

nnnO I0r tracing and locating Gold or Silver hltttN Ore, lost or buried treasures NJ. ID. AlOAH FOWI IER. Box 337 .SCutcuRtOn. Conn
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
A Unitless Problem.

Teacher-If one servant girl could clean two rooms in two hours how long would 1t take two servant girls to do It?
 Little Girl-Four hours.
 Teacher-WrOng. It would only take one hour.
 Little Girl-Oh, didn't know you was talking about servant girls that wasn't on speaking terms-Tid-Bits
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26
A Literary Man,
Young NJ
Onr Flexible Language.

Old -ent-Ees; but what do you | for . living ng?-Cinclnnah Enquirer.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

First Tramp-Say, WOggIes, yer don { look we'll. What's de matter?
 Second Tramp-I slept in hoss rad lsh bed last night, an I has a colt in my throat-Detroit Free Press.
The St. Johns herald., 1898-03-26

~ Piso's Cure for Consumption mas oeen a GOd-send to me.-Wm. B. Mcclellan. Chester, Florida, Sept r, 1895.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1898-01-31
Though. 10 End II.

Those who have feared that the in
depreciation of the now famous section
- of the tariff law would result in an
additional tariff on all articles i'm
ported into this country from abroad
through Canada. also in a discriminate
ing duty on all goods brought in by
other than American vessels may rest
easier After the attorney general,
Mr.. Mckenna, had expressed the opin
ion that the law should not he con-
strued in that way the agitation sub
sided. although this was net settle
ment of the question. a test case was
TO come before the board Of appraisers
and if its decision should prove con
trary to the opinion given 10y the at
torney general question would have to
be passed upon by the supreme court.
Indeed ii could he brought before thu
court if the government should choos
whatever the decision Of the board
might be. That board Of appraisers
has now reported its decision being in
accord with the view taken by the at
torney general. This is generally r.
gaided as virtual settlement of the
question as it is not thought the GOV
eminent Will care to bring the matter
before the court.