The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1898-07-01
CIRCUS PEOPLE OUTCOME.
Dickered for Cheap Fares, nut the
Railroad Man Was No Fool.


Railroad Man Was No Fool.
There are people who think you
can't beat a circus man. But want to
tell you that the hardest man to do is
live railroad man."
The old sawdust manager had tried
It, He continued:
Know where Purcell is in the In
dian Territory? Away down at the
jumping-off place ON the Santa Fe
road. The show had been at Purcell,
and We wanted to get out in the night
for a long run. We were going to
make jump to Kansas City. Not
far from Purcell is another town, Okla
homa City. At that point competing
road with the Santa Fe runs in. We
had five hundred people, and of course
the railroad men were after us. 1t
was a big haul. Some Of our people
bought through tickets from Purcell.
and they didn't worry. But about two
hundred, maybe more. Of the crowd.
that always haggles over ten-cent
dicker. concluded to take the Santa Fe
from Purcell to Oklahoma City, pay
the short haul, and then take the COM
peting line at Oklahoma, the agents Of
which were active and full OF promises.
Then the Santa Fe men fixed it so
the dickerers couldn't buy any tickets
from Purcell to Oklahoma, for the
train we were to 60 on was special.
The dickerers said that was all right;
that they would wait for the regular.
In less than five minutes a bulletin
was slapped on the board of the sta
tion to the effect that the regular Santa
Fe was twelve hours late This made
the fellows who were dickering for a
cheaper rate turn white around their
gills.
I'm another five minutes see man
on track velocipede scudding down
the stretch. Every man to his bust
ness. So thought the railroad people
knew what they were doing, and they
did That chap on the velocipede was
going down the track to flag the regu-
lar and hold it indefinitely. Smart
trick, wasn't 1t? Wait until I tell you.
There was smarter trick than that.
when the special got ready to pull
out, the dickerers asked the agent If
they could pay on the train from Pur-
cell to Oklahoma. And he said cert
So they all boarded the train at Pur-
cell, intending to get off at Oklahoma.
Just before the train pulled out, the
agent walks down to the engine and
asks the old man at the throttle how
long he had been on the road and
about the capacity of his iron horse,
and SO forth
How many miles can she go at her
best?' asked the agent.
Ion good track, sixty-fve miles,
els it good track through Okla
homa City,
Yes, pretty good
"'All right. You've got no orders to
stop there nor to slow up, have your
mot yet
Well, when you get to the edge of
the town you let her go. Don't stop
for anything-fags, or teams, or cat
tie. Scoot through the town at six
ty-five-mile gait, or more If you like,
and don't slow up until you strike that
strip of desolation about eleven miles
t'other side, and you smoke box of
the finest cigars in Chicago. Is it
go?'
eff don't get no orders fore
start
Well, you are five minutes late
now
In minute, and l calculate it was
less, the circus special was under way.
1t went around curves like scared
snake. 1t shot across straight lines
like gazelle that had been singed. It
whirled the dust of that country into
the sky. After while we saw town.
Then we went through it like the wo-
man that's shot from the catapult, only
more so. One of the dickerers, who
was smiling to think the conductor had
not yet come round, asked brakeman
as the train was going through the
street, What town is this?' The brake
man said: Oklahoma City,
1.-THE dickerer's smile faded as It
came, as the poet says, and his hair
stood up, and turning to the brakeman
he says:
'Jezecrimini! Stop her! Here's
where we get off,
She doesn't even hesitate at a
town like this said the brakeman.
We'll, about eleven miles on this
side, in a strip Of country where a
crow can't live and where an Indian
wouldn't be caught dead, the old iron
horse began to slow up. The conductor
came through just then and said:
'Tickets'
well, say, that was funny sight.
Them that had tickets showed up and
then went to sleep. But the dickerers
began to kick. They said they should
have been let of at Oklahoma City.
The conductor said the train didn't
stop at Oklahoma; that it wasn't
scheduled to stop there, and that he
wasn't going to 60 back that trip. The
leader of the dickerers for cheap fares
wanted to know what was to be done.
"The conductor was an old-timer. He
had face on him like a woman who
never loved anybody. He just told
them. Pay or get on Then they ask
ed him where they could pay to. And
he said the train wouldn't stop any
more until 1t got to Kansas City the
next morning, unless 1t stopped to put
them off. And he reached up and
caught the bell cord
And every one of the dickerers paid
to Kansas City. And, of course, under
the railroad law, they paid more than
they would have paid If they had
bought ticket at Purcell. And the
company was that much ahead. And
that's what mean when say that the
hardest man to dc is live railroad
man."