The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1898-11-02

He saw the lambkln where It played,
Aud nervously "let co.
He'd shut both eyes, and so OF course,
The poor thing was laid low.
And then the hunter hurried back
Into the city, where
He still relates the thrilling tale
OF how he killed bear.
Chicago News.
Had Substitute.
Dixon-'Is your friend Smithson
deep thinker?"
Hixon-'No, indeed. Hos maj
ried. Chicago News.
Woman's Reason.
"She sent my letter back unopened.
"Why?"
"She said the postmau who deliv
cred it kicked her dog. Chicago
Record.
Ins and Outs.
''He married into one of your bes
families, did he not?"
''Not exactly; his wife married on
Of one of our best families. "-Detroi
Journal.
Her Early Training.
with what gracefully sweeping
motion she handles a fam"
''Yes, she used to keep the flies of
'he table in her fathers Omaha luncl
room. ."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
A Friendly Offer.
Lawyer Goodly-"What's wrong,
Did chap"
Uglimugge-'I won a kiss from Miss
Purtiest. She won't pay up"
Lawyer Goodly-"Never mind, old
nan; I'll collect it for you. Truth.
Able to Worry Along.
'Do you need any help?" asked the
lizard.
'I think not" replied the snake.
4 can'pull off this event without your
assistance. Thanks"
And presently he finished shedding
his skin. Topeka kan Capital.
His Gentle Little Joke.
please, sir, can't you help me?'
tsked the seeming mendicant; 81 an
sick and in need of few dimes"
''If you are sick, why don't you gC
to the hospital?" answered the sub
citizen.
II thought little change would d,
me good" was the plausible reply. =
Kansas City Star.
Tommy's Last Question.
Papa" said Tommy Tredway.
"Now, Tommy" replied Mr.. Tired
way, II shall answer only one NOR,
question to-day. So be careful wha
you ask" !"
eyes, papa"
swell, go on"
''Why don't they bury the Den,
Sea"-Harper's Bazaar.
At Last,
First Veteran-'T tell you, thes,
modern improvements in long-rangt
guns and chilled-steel projectiles have
made war a good deal riskier than i
was in our day
Second Veteran-''Yes; l see tina
somebody has invented a gun nov
which, at a thousand yards, WI G,
clear through small pocket Bibl
carried over a mans heart. Judge
A Last Request.
He-"And am I to understand tina
your refusal is final?"
She-''It is"
He-"Then life no longer has
charm for me; l shall hang myself.
She-"Will you grant me favor?
He-"Certainly. Name it,"
She-"Discontinue your existenc
elsewhere; papa objects to your hang
ing around here. Chicago News.
Trouble Ahead.
II regret to observe" said Skill
ton, "that there is to be another
yacht race for the Americas cup"
"Regret? Why it indicates tina
England and the United States ar,
coming together againl" said Jones
"That's just it," said Skillton
1--WE are beginning to get along s
nicely, and now all the old trouble
will be reopened. "-Harper's Bazaar
why He Was Troubled.
Jack-"Come, old man, cheer up
What if she did break ths engage
ment; she's not the only fish in tn
swim.
Tom-"Oh, L don't care any. I'M
about her breaking the engagement
but you see I've got to go right o
paying installments on the ring 70
the next six months. That's wher
the icy breeze comes in."-Chicag
News.
A Plausible InprobabIlity.
The Boarder (irascibly) - "Ho,
many more times, Katy, must 1 tel
you that 1 want my toast well Drowned d
This is hardly more than yellowed"
The Maid Gnnocently)-"Sdre, sol
ut was brown whin l tux ut aft til
shtove tin minutes ago. May be q
settin' in the sun moight have fade
ut since. Sure the sun-loigat do b
dreadful har-r-rd on colors, sor. -
Puck.
Moral Suasion.
Old Gentleman-"Do you mean t
say that your teachers never thras
you?"
Little Boy-''Never! We hav
moral suusion at our school,"