The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1898-03-25
VOL. XLIU---NO II
M4TRTMONIAL SNAG.

| call it Il matrimonial snag because
the matrimonial bark is always going
| to pieces on il. 1t does mischief to
other things, interferes with the
smooth current OF innumerable friend
ships, and mars many IL close intimacy.
But it is to the bark in which man
and his wife have been launched to-
gether that it does the great harm.
Now this snag in itself is not a for
midable affair. 1t is made up simply
of two diverse opinions about resting.
\ ct no jagged reef is more dangerous,
and all those who cannot sail over it
must inevitably be wrecked on it.
a man, for instance, has worked all
| day out-of-dOors-in the field maybe.
he has had the air and the sun, and COLI
versed with men of his kind. Resting
| to him means coming home, stretch
ing out his limbs, and breathing in
domestic peace.
The woman, however, has been In
all day, without the air, and without
the sun-dusting, sweeping, cooking,
sewing, disciplining children; seeing no
one, talking to no one, meeting no
one with whom an idea could be in
terchanged, or from whom a new
direction for her thoughts could be
gained. When night comes, her
greatest rest would seem to lie in
change of scene, the bringing in of out
side interests, or a more sympathetic
| and enlivening intercourse with her
husband.
He, however, cannot understand
this. You are restless he says to
her, "discontended. But you cannot
find anything better than this wher-
ever you go. Take my word for it;
| have seen them all" And he folds
his hands and pUffs at his pipe, and
basks in the quiet contentment of
soul that has been satisfied.
1t is the same thing when a man
goes down town all day and leaves
the woman at home. His idea of rest
ing is cheerful lireside at night: a
wife as bright, as gay and responsive
as when she received in her mothers
house, and all care was spared her.
Pm SO tired, | would like to go to
sleep with the children at six O'clock"
many wife signs. But it is just the
time my husband likes me to be at
my best. 1t bothers him to have me
tired, and he has such different ideas
of resting from mine.n
Duties, on the other hand, may
have called the woman out of doors
all day, and duties may have kept
the man in an office. Then it may
rest him to go out at night. He may
crave amusement and diversion, some
entertainment for the mind. These
distract his thoughts and rest his
brain, and make him fresher for the
morrow's work.
But the thousand demands of the
day, the obligations and requirements
of some position she must fill, have
used the woman up. The thought of
new eXcitements and diversions only
wearies her. The efforts she makes to
respond to her husbands wishes seem
spiritless, and no pleasure is given or
felt. He cannot understand why it
all Is. She cannot understand why he
does not see. He grows discontinued,
she dissatisfied. The need of another
kind of sympathy is suggested.
Interests begin to diverge, and two
paths are made, growing every day
wider apart.-HG1per's Bazar.
CAUTIOUS.
He walked into the apothecary shop
with hesitating step, and glanced
nervously at the rows of bottles with
a scared look in his pale blue eyes.
After fidgeting about uncertainty for
of the clerk, and reckoning mystic
riously, led the way to, secluded
corner by the cigar-case, where the
clerk was surprised by finding a
trembling foretinger hooked tena-
ciously into one of his button-holes
and an eager face thrust suddenly
almost against his.
WHAT the matter asked the
clerk.
Il s'pose you can lay your hand
right on the morphine bottle, can't
your" said the stranger, i'll an anxious
whisper.
Yes, sir. Certainly" replied the
astonished salesman.
An | reckon if you was pushed
you could find the strychnine in a
minute or twoY'
"Of course"
"Mebbe the arsenic hasn't got lost
or mislaid clear beyond findin,., if you
just had to, has it?'
"Assuredly not"
AN the sugar lead bottle
couldn't get away from you if it
tried?n
No, indeed"
AN chasin' up the vitriol to its lair
would be just play for your
with all the drugs here"
But s'posin' some of the other
fellers had been changin' them
around, just as a joke you know"
What do you mean?"
Suppose the bottles had got
mixed?"
impossible. Besides, everything
is plainly labelled"
AN there amt no chance of your
palmin' off prussic acid for pepper
mint?'
Not the slightest"
"Well, rve-half-a-n otion-to-
risk-it. Yes, you may give me two
onnces of peppermint, young man."
WORDS OF VISDOM.
MISUNDERSTANDING everybody
gets after it is too late to make use of
it.
A man generally asks a woman's
advice so he can show her how foolish
she is.
Life's pleasures, if not abused, will
be new every morning and fresh every
evening.
Lots of men have nice necks and
shoulders; only it doesn't count them
anything.
Honesty may be the best policy, but
life insurance is more satisfactory to
the widow.
Kindness in the heart is like rose
leaves in a drawer, sweeting every OBJ
ject around.
The woman who marries for home
| is apt to find that she has married a
| pig for Il sty.
ldleness is the dead sea that swal-
| lows all virtueS-the self made sepul-
cher of living man.
Some people are content with being
up-to-date, but there are others who
borrow trouble two or three years
| ahead.
Some men keep so busy deciding
what women they don't want to
marry that they never get time to de-
eide what woman they do.
Daniel IVEBSTER'S OXEN
OF oxen Mr.. Webster was always
fond, and was as good judge of them
as could anywhere be found. He
knew all of his own by name, kept
track of their ages and peculiarities,
and frequently wrote home from the
national capital directing such and
such yoke to be sold and replaced by
others, in order to keep his stock al
ways at the best.
On his return from Washington
| tbav Uarn aIn0Oc- tbn first obiacfS of