The herald., 1898-08-15

! Nj. DooIey on Gen. Miles,
: ''NIoon|lght Excursion"
: f<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

ffftTTtfH\<
Dear, oh, dear" said Mr.. Dooley. "I'd
give five dollars-an' I'd kill man fr three
Ii was out iv this Sixth wa-ard tonight
an down with Ginral Miles gran picnic
an moonlight excursion in Porther Ricky.
tbs no comfort in bein' q coward whtn ye
think " thin br-rave la-ads facin' death
be sufllcation in bokays an dyin' iv waltz
In with tn pretty girls Nv Porther Ricky.
II dinnaw whether Gin'ral Miles picked
out tn Job or whether twas picked out
rr him. But annyhow, whin he got to
Sandago de Cuba am looked ar-round him,
he says to his frind Gin'ra1 Shafter. Gin
ral,' says he, we have done we'll so far,
he says. ''Tis not rr me to take tn lorls
frim tn steamin' brow Nv thrue hero.' he
says. 4 lave ye here he says, 'rr to COM
plete tn victhry ye have SO nobly begun,
he says. FIT you,1 he says. 'th' wallop in
tn eye firm TIL newspaper rayporthers,
tn roun' robbing AM tn sunsthroke,' he
says, 'fr me tn hardship iv tn battlefield,
tn late dinner. tn theayter party an tn
sickenin' polky,' he says. Gather he says,
'th' fruits iv ye'er bravery he says. Ray
turn, he says, to ye'er native land an
rayceive amy gratichood tn sicrety Nv war
can spare firm his own family he says.
'F'r me- he says, there Is no way but f'r
to tu'urn me back upon this festive scene.
he says. 'Ordherly,' he says, put bottle
on tn ice an see that me goold pants that
I wear with tn pale-blue vest with tn
drmon buttons Is irned out he says. An
with haggard face he walked aboord tn
excursion steamer an wint away.
I'D hate to tell We iv tn thriles iv tn
expedition, Hinnissy Whin tn picnic got
as far as Punch, on the southern coast Nv
Porther Ricky, Ginral Miles gazes out an
says he: This looks like a good place to
hang tn hammicks an have lunch, says
he. Forward, brave men, says he, where
ye see me di-mon's SPARKLE says he. For
ward an plant tn crokay arches Nv our
beloved country he says. An in they
wint. like intrepid warryors that they
ar-re. On tn beach they was met be dill
CATION firm tn town Of Punch consistin Nv
tn mayor, tn common council, tn polls
an fire departments, tn Grand Army Nv tn
Rapublic, an prominent citizens In car
redges. Gin'ral Miles, maxim hasty tie.
let, advanced unflinchin'ly to meet thin.
'Gintlemen,' says he, what can do f'r
YEP he says. we come, says tn chair
man Nv tn comfy, 'rr to offer ye,' he says.
tn run " tn town. he says. We have held
out he says, as long as we cud,' he says.
But he says. 'they'se a limit to human
endurance he says. We can withstan' ye
no longer he says. We surrinder. Take
us prisoners an rayceive us into ye'er
gloryous an well-fed raypubIic.' he says.
'Br-rave men, says Gn'ral Miles, I con-
gratulato ye.' he says, on tn heerofsm Nv
ye'er Defense he says. 'Ye stuck man.
FLY to ye'er colors, whativer they ar-re.
he says. 4 on'y wondher that ye waited
fr me TO come before surrindhrin, he says.
I welcome ye into tn union he says. I
don't know how tn union'll feel about 1t,
but that's no business iv mine he says.
'Ye will get ye'er wur-rkin' cards firm tn
walkin' diligate' he says, AM yell be en-
titled he says, to pay ye'er share Nv tn
taxes an to live awhile an die whin ye get
f-ready,' he says. Jus tn same as II we was
bor-rn at home he says. I don't know tn
names Nv ye. but I'll call We all Casey f'r
short he says. Put ye'er boakays i'm tn
hammick,' he says, an raytuYn to Punch.
he says, AM freeze somethin' fr me- he
says, 'f'r me thrawt Is parched with tn
labors " tn day. he says. Th' r-rest Nv
tn avenin' was spint in dancin,' music an
boat-ridin', an an enj'yable time was had.
9TH mex day tn army moved on Punch
an Gin'ral Miles marched into tn ILL
fated city, preceded be flower girls sthrew-
In r-roses an geranyums before him. In
tn afthernoon they was lawn tinnis
party an at night tn Gin'ral attinded a
banket at tn Gran Palace hotel. At mid
night he was serenaded be tn Raymimber
tn Maine Banjo an Mandolin club. tn
entire popylace attinded with pork chops
In their buttonholes to show their pathreet-
ism. TIL mex day, afther breakfastin'
with Mayor Casey. he set out on his weary
march over tn trough, fiower-sthrewn
paths fr San Joon. He has been in gr-reat
purl firm a witherin' fire iv bokays, an
he has met an overpowered some iv th'
mos savage orators in Porther Ricky.
But whin las heard iv him he had pitched
his tents an ice cream freezers near th'
irnimy's wall. AM was graJully silencin'
thin with proclamations."
They'll kill him with kindness II he
don't look out" said Mr.. Hennessy.
II dinnaw about that" said Mr. Dooley,
"but I know this. that there's tn maxim
" gr-reat statesmen In Porther Hickey. A
proud people that can switch as quick as
thin la-ads have nawthin' to larn IN tn
way " what Hogan calls tn signs " Gov
ernment. even firm tn supreme COURT
Chicago Journal.