The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1898-07-11

Dor. Kindly prepare for its reception"
Pretty crowded; blu I'll do my best.
Good-by."
"Good-by." B-z-z-z-t.
Telephone Call 14.747. July 3. 1880 a.
B-z-z-z-z-t, Hello. Is this Admir-
al Simpsons feet?"
Yes Who's this talking?"
"Davy Jones. Present respects to
admiral Sampson Inc inform him that
Pluton, first of consignment, has been
received. Good-by."
Telephone Call 14,74s. July 3. 10:45 a.
B-z-z-z-t. Hello! Simpsons fleet?
This is Davy Jones. Furor received.
Good-by."
Telephone Call 1879. July 3, ~ M
B-z-z-z-z-t! Hello! Simpsons fleet?
Yes: this is Jones. Almirante Oque1do
received. Coming pretty fast. Any
more coming? What's that? Gosh!
Good-by."
Telephone Call 1880. July 3, 12:15 p.
B-z-z-z-z-t! Hello. Sampson, Say,
slow down there. can you? Infanta
Maria Teresa just arrived. Don hustle
a man so. This is no summer hotel.
G~ood-by."
Telephone Call 14,751, July 3. 1890 p.
p-E-L-L-t. I1ttIo. N1LCdyd arrived.
Have put out standing room only sign.
This is getting beyond a joke. Two of
my assistant mermen have struck.
What are you trying to do; bottle me
up, too? No! Apologies don go. Good
by"
Telephone Call 14.752, July 3. 2 p. NJ
B-z-z-z-z-t! Hello! That you, Samp-
son? No, l want the admiral him
self. Hello! Look here, Samp-
SON. I'm boss here, and i want you to
understand that I've closed shop. See?
The Cristobal Colon's here. and she's
the last. Understand that? I've shut
and locked the locker. and I'm going
back now to sit on the cover. That
goes. too. Good-by."
Telephone Call 1883, July 4, 10 a. M
B-z-z-z-t Hello! This the white
house, u. S. Az"
Yes: what's wanted?"
"Davy Jones respects to President
Mckinley. and he'd like to talk with
him over the phone for a minute. . =
Hello!
This President Mckinley? Congrat-
ulations, Mr.. President. on you glori-
Gus Fourth"
MANY thanks, Mr.. Jones. Can l be
of any service to you?"
Yes. Mr.. President; 1 want you to
call off our navy"
Beg pardon, Mr.. Jones. / don't him
L quite understand you.
NJ President, I've got too much
business. / want a respite"
But what nave r.
"I'l tell you. on May 1 l got a con-
signment of Spanish ships from Ad-
miral Dewey"
Yes"
1--WE Just got them nicely slowed
away, and now comes Admiral Sampson
with a rush order that's just swamped
49,, recommendation and ~ HIRING ax-
ira help as fast as / can"
I'm sorry we disconnected you, Mr..
Jones'"
Now. Mr.. President, as between po-
tentate and p~otentate. / want to ask
you if you've any more Spanish ships
in sight?'
well. there's another fleet around at
Great green-eared sea serpents! An
other? Do you think l want a Spanish
colony down here? I won't stand IL"
But, Mr.. Jones'"
n but about it, Mr.. President. l
won't stand it! You send 'em here and
I'll turn 'em back. There's a limit to
my endurance. No, sir, I'll turn the
locker over to the mermen and go out
of business, and that settles it,
Very well, Mr.. Jones. In that case
we'll have to keep that Spanish fleet
ourselves"
That's the idea, Mr.. President. Con-
gratulations on your victory and good
wait a minute. Mr.. President, will you
do me a favor?"
with pleasure, Mr.. Jones. What is
it,"
IF your nation gets into trouble
with let me know in time so
that | can resign and go and climb a
tree"
Certainly. Good-by, Mr.. Jones"
Thanks. Good-by, Mr.. President"
R-z-z-z-Z-t.