The record-union., 1898-01-24
The Blooming. and Fading
Of a Local Wit,
(Written for the '.Record-Union'' by
Elwyn Irving Hoffman.)

(Written for the Record Union by
Elwyn Irving Iioffman.)
The stage driver. driving through
Pleasant Valley, pulled in bis horss
under certain oak tree, and then
leaning from his seat proceeded labor
iously to spell out the notice that was
tackled thereon. The notice was writ
ten o half sheet Of foolscap paper iT
a peculiarly running hand, which the
slight rain that had fallen the night
before had made even more running
and as the stage driver was not much
of scholar it was some time before he
mastered the sense of it. When he did
however, this is what he read:
NOTICEi
Notice is hereby given that on Satur-
day evening next, at the Pleasant Val
will be delivered by Mr.. Anthony
Hobbs, whose fame as a Wit extenos
south as far as Smartsville, north as
far as Browns Valley and west and
east more than three miles and guar
ter, Mr.. Hobbs has devoted all the
energy OF his mighty intellect upon this
lecture and It Will be one great lauSh
from beginning to end
SOME ADVICE TO FARMERS. II
YOU want TO know how to rise, with
to transplant post holes, put on your
store clothes. hitch up old Betsey and
come and hear him. Admission only
Is centSi
Come one! Come all!
so young Ant Hobbs IS Scin' 10 lee
ture-hey." said the stage driver -
himself as he drove or. Nel., ae.s a
pretty smart feller. ar | giless hell
make it so. But / DOUBT i" and he
shook his head sagely.
The notice which the stage driver had
read was only one OF a dozen that All
thony Hobbs had tackled up in con
spicuous places around the valley the
evening before Anthony was q young
man who lived on little ranch at the
lower end of Pleasant Valley. As the
stage driver had said, he was a smart
feller'-too smart, perhaps, for such a
pohy little place as that in which Ia
lived. He was a natural humorist. ana
needed only touch to raise him to
fame, and he had seized on the idea Of
lecturing as d chance to develop HIM
self If ne could make a success Of
that, he felt that it would not be long
before he would be able to command
larger audiences and, perhaps, some
day. become as famous as Mark Twain
or Bill Nye He had already contrib
uted to several papers. and was spoken
of as bright, tal.nted, versatile
writer by all of them.
The Hobbs ranch was the prertiest
little place in the valley, but it failed
to pay even expenses. The clover had
about run out, the fences were getting
old and patchy, and the vineyard had
been attacked by black rot. Not evea
the -hriftiest farmer could have made
his .;iving on the place in its best days,
and much less could Anthony, whose
heart was not in it, He was devoured
with greater ambition than were his
humdsuIn neighbors and it was abso-
lutely impossible for him to understand
the art of farming. Perhaps it was Il
realization of this which suggested the
subject of his Some Advice 10
Farmers'-"for,' as he told his moth
er, IF there is one thing moro than an
other of which l know nothing, it is
farming" Z
1t was on the g aernoon of a Sunday
that he wrote his lecture, sitting out
on the little porch where the June
breezes brought him the perfume Of
fragrant honeysuckle, and where lie
could hear the mellow notes OF the
mud larlks and the caroling of the little
redheads.