The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1898-05-08
ALL ABOUT KISSING.
sad story az "a urgeo Who offered To Kiss
Not wisely hut when He Was Drunk.

sad story Of n surgeon W ho offered tn Kiss
Not Wisely hot when HE Was Drunk.
From the New Orleans P~icayune.
Some one with plenty OF time on his
hands has conceived the idea of hunt
ing through the works of all the we'll
known English and American noveiists
for the purpose of gathering all the
adjectives with which they qualify the
word kiss. The result OF his labor is
that kisses can be as follows: Cold.
warm. icy, burning, chilly. cool. low
ing. Indifferent. balsamic. fragrant.
blissful. passionate. aromatic. with tears
believed. Ions. soft. hasty. intoxicat-
ing, dissembling. delicious. pious, ten
der. beguiling, hearty. distracted, fran
tic, fresh as the morning, breathing
fire. divine. satanic, glad. sad. super
fetal. quiet. loud, fond. heavenly, eN-
ecrable. devourinS, ominous. ~fervent'
parching. nervous soulless. stupefying.
slight. careless. anxious, painful. sweet
refreshing. embarrassed, shy. mute.
ravishing. holy, sacred. firm. trembling,
ele ctrifying. ecstatic. hurried. faithless.
narcotic, feverish. immoderate, sister
ly, brotherly and paradisaical. The
task seemed interminable and ne gave
up AT his stage. This leads to saying
that the secretary of state for India
has lust issued "A solemn order i'm coun-
ell dismissing from the service ot the
Anglo-Indian government one OF tne
medical authorities at Madras. a mill
tary surgeon named Clarence smith,
enioying the equivalent rank to that
of brieadier general. for merely aving
requested n kiss. The surgeon general
was a married man. possessed OF en-
cumbrances in the shane OF sroWh-up
children. and the lady To whom he OF
fered his salute had a husband. she
might not have said anything about 1t
had the surgeon general been sober.
but when he made the offer he had
been dining not wisely. but too wen,
and instead of breathing love. ne
breathed the odor of brandies ana
sodns. Even ladies i'm the East are
ayerse to taking alcoholic stimulants
i'm this form. and accordingly the OF
ended female turned the medical gen
eral out of her house, and minated
to him that she should inform her nus
band. The following morning the or
fender realized that he had made a
fool of himself. and wrote a letter OF
abiect apology To the lady. attributing
his behay ior to intoNiCation. But there
was no forgiveness i'm her. and so. a
few days later. her husband sent a uc-
tailed report of the generals action 10
Headquarters at Calcutta, along Win
the letter of apology. All this took
place "A year or two ago. and ever since
then the British authorities nave nad
their hands fun Of correspondence, as
cussion and renOrts about the matter
= The ARPIleNed n1Sltnu utlld iltltu lidN
' the offender be fttingly punished. and
/. afte, due consideration the Viceroy,
P Lord E,Iein. who. as a Scot, is naturally
e devoid of any sense of humor ordered
the DISMISSED from the service or the
. all too gallant general. The latter APP
| pealed against the decision, pleading III
Y extenuation Of his temerity that IN.
lady had frequently permitted him to
r kiss her hand. arguing that this JUST
u fled further advances. The lady pro
;. tested, however. that she had resisted
Y and resented even the first approach
: toward what diplomatists describe az
an understanding. and the authorlt'
les appear to have accepted her state
ment and have confirmed the dismissal
of the general, after "A service covering
a ouarter of a century. nominalIy ol
the ground of Offering to kiss a married
lady. but i'm reality because a man wh'
could be such a fool as to risk his posi-
q tion TO embrace an elderly and unat
II tractiye woman was obviously too fool
D. ish TO be ~intrusted with any r~esponsibl
Is office in the service of her Brltanni
z majesty. 1t is unfortunate for the sur
l, geon general, Clarence smith. that ID
p is not in the service of the queen OF IN
y Netherlands. for the Dutch courts q
NJ appeaI have recently decided that
L. man who kisses p lady who Is a tota
stranger to him.. i'm the public street
N cannot be legally punished for the OF
IN Tense. ITO kiss a person reHlarhe
lie the president of the supreme couT'
ID cannot be a misdemeanor, as IT Il J
m he nature of a warm mark or Syn
Id pathy." Indeed. the Dutch judges seer
g. 10 consider il as a permissible an
at praiseworthy way Of showing admira
e. ton for personal charms. II Is inter
at esting to note that the case which le
a 10 this remarkable statement on III
as part of the Dutch court of appeals wa
I'd decided I'm the first Instance by III
a lower courts aeainst the kisser. VII
G. was fined a norin for his temerit.
10 This Judgment. however, was r.
Id versed by the higher courts. which ar
IL appears. Of the opinion that u
nm privilege OF kissing "A Dutch Nrow
es not worth even the trihlng sum OF
cents.