Santa Fe new Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1898-1951, 1898-01-28

thompson cotAs down to the wharf lookil
mighty excite and when he could cit hi
breath he sayAi
Boys, what dye s'pose has happened
III be goshed to Goshen If that skulema an
hain't gone In to bust the community
This AFTERNOON she told all her scholars
that the airth was as round as a ball."
II can't believe it, " says Josephus Har
mon.
"She'd never dare to do it, SAYS Jot
Taylor.
did I ever hear the likes o that, say
Phineas Green.
But it turned out that she had said so,
ana, moreover, when a committee was ap
p1nted to go and see her about it she hello
up her chin and deolar'd that it was so.
Then we called an i%ndignashun meetin tt
see what should be done. When the meetir
was ready fur b~izness, Plato White got III
and says:
II know thar's hills and hollers ON this
alrth, fur I've seen some o. 'em myself, but
outside O. EN- the world is as flat as my
ole wallet, and anybody as says different
does it to pick a fuss"
"Im with Plato" says Harrison Pom
eroy as he gifts up. "That time 1 was
bowed out to sea and picked up by an
Englishman and carried to Liverpool |
found nuthin but f1atness fur the hull
5000 miles. If the world had bin round,
Fe'd hev either gone up or gone down hill.
! felt In my bones jest how it would be,
aad now it's come. The idea o. that gal
comm here to talk sioh stuff and nonsense
10 folks as hev bin ketchin crabs and lob
sseys fur the last hundred vars"
Three or four others follered In the same
strain, and then tho preacher got up and
pIrty nigh took the roof off the buildin by
deoiarin that the gal was right. He brung
In q globe to prove it, and he p'inted out
sails on the ocean to back up the globe.
lie run ag'in a mud bank, however. He
ptnted and talked and talked and p'inted,
hut nobody would believe him. Bimeby
he 60 ired and said he didn't keer whether
we believed or not, and we passed a reso-
iushun that the gal shouldn't teach any
more sich stuff to our children If she want
ed to keep her job. Things went along all
right fur q week or so, and some of the
children had got so they could tell the pic
tur' o. a kangaroo from that O. a church
steeple, when the skulema'am broke loose
ag'in. She told the children that the airth
moved around the sun, and before dark
Squan Greek was b'ilin over with excite
ment. 1t was wuss than when we got the
news that p. L. Barnum's five legged colt
was dead. We called another indignashun
meetin that very night, and Tim Smith
got up and said:
al this heresy or sedition or what?
Ever since Columbus diskiyered this North
Ameriky, with Moo Jersey and Squan
Greek i%nclooded, the sun hev bin movin
from Squan Greek pint around to Seven
Feet inlet. Our grandfathcrs saw it, our |
fathers saw it, and if we hain't seen it |
then we must be blind. She's moved ev-
cry day O. her life, and the airth hain't |
had nuthin to do with it, but along comes
q gal from Philadelphia that don't know |
an oyster bed from a jib topsail and says
the sun has bin standin still all this time.
l was purity nigh knocked out when she |
declar'd ag' in the fairness o. the airth, but
this thing finishes me. I can't low my
son Jonas to tend that skule no more. |
With SIGH teachin's as that he wouldn't
know huff to bait a fishhook next var"
Tim Smith sot down amid the awfullest |
sort O. applause, and then Solomon Temp
kins got up and said:
eve ar told that this airth do move.
When has she moved? Every man of lis
here tonight was born in Squan Greek,
and did any o. MS ever know this town to
move up to New York or down to Barne-
gat? Has the wharf or the lighthouses
moveds Amt everythin standin Jest
whar 1t was so Vars ago? AS to the sun
standin still, if my ole woma should tell
me that l should hev her locked up fur an
idiot. She's bin movin ever since the
wheels O. time was set in moshun, and
she'll keep right OH movin when Squan
Greek has bin forgotten. I've got a boy
named Thomas what is attcndin that
sKule. He's a good boy, an he'll find a
clam under W o feet O. mud. Ruther than
hev that boy split I'll sell out and move
away"
solomon also got lots o. applause, and
we sent fur the teacher to explain
matters. She showed up, and she was
powerful sassy about it. She stuck to it
that the sun stood still and tho airth
moved, and she talked and talked to prove
1t, aud the preacher backed her up. We
we couldn't be mistooken about
1t, but arter jawin fur a couple o. hours
we agreed to try her fur a week longer.
We voted to do 1t, and it was a clus vote
and Orter bin a warnin to her, but it
It wasn't over four days when
Abner Whites boy corrected his father fur
sayin 'sChowsday." The old man got arter
him, and the boy owned up that the teach,
or had told him to allus call it"Tuesday.a
That was the last hair that broke tho
back. Abner went out on tho
street and bowed his fishhOrM and got the
town out fur another i%ndignashun meetin,
and this time thar wasn't to be no foolin
about things. He gifts up and he says:
Fur the last 200 vars Squan Creek
folks hev bin calm the third day Of the
Chcwsday. Tho name has bin good
fun the best of us till that gal cum
here from Philadelphia. All of a sudden
she pops In and tells our children to call II
Tuesday, and as I'm helpin my boy Jim ,
nsh ana 'taters tonight at supper time
he stands up and corrccts me. Kin Won !
imagine the feelin Of i father when he's I
told by his son that thar's no SIGH word AZ
.hewstay md that that father has bin
wrong all his life2 I'm one as saws that
must 20. If that gal keeps on with
her ways, Squan Creek won't market =
lobster next var"
We was all agreed with him. We felt
chat VIZ was standin on the aige Of a vol.
cano, which might bust forth at any mint
overwhelm us, and we paid that gal
"A and sent her off next day and broke up
;he skule. Thar's bin talk Of settin up
snother-one to Farm the children TO read
write-but | don't think It'll ever be
lone. Readin and writin ia good 'nuff fur
as hev nuthin else to do, but they
lon't help nobody1to find CLANS nor set
obster pots. M. QUAD.