The record-union., 1898-11-14
FOR THE CHAMPIONSHIP.
Vermont Cousins Have Been Imi-
tating Ananias.


Pea Soup Ridge, VT, March 10, 1898.
My Dear Uncle-Say! What you tink
You ant tink you was have one smart
nephew Ell? All tink me dat All was
more smart as All tink All was probly.
When All tole you what All have in
vent Ahl bet you twenty-five dollalre,
yes bah gosh Ah'l bet you more as
dat, Ahl bet twenty-five dollaire and
fifty cents dat you say All was more
smart as you tink All was An want
you to come wrote on me at once who
de mans name was what put de patent
on de new tink what All have invent.
You see hit am lax dis; Ma bruddeX-
in-law Pete, he have 10 female hen.
Now he was brag about dose hen, about
de eggs he was lay. He was come on de
grocery store an sit on de counter an
tell all de mans present what nice hen
he was have. He say dat he get l.
eggs hevery day from dose 10 hen for
de las month Den he screw up his
| eye an look for to see if he can squirt
one yard tobacco juice through de
knothole on top de flour and still have
strength left to tole some more big lie
| de same day.
Well All was come on top ma house
an tole ma Rosa what Pete was brag
Ma womans he was say, What for you
| ant smart enough to beat dat Pete an
make your hen lay de more eggs as his
hen?" All tole her ma hen don't was sc
| foolisher as lay SO many egg lax Pete
/ tole bout he hens. l can't help Du'
think what Ma Rosa he say about max
| ing ma hen lay some more egg.
| All tink of it long tam, but after
While l tink of plan for fool de hen. Hit
was lax dis All was TAX some boards
| an make me a nest what have hole
! in de center of de box. Den All was
| fix tube on de under side dat hole foi
to convey de egg outside de henhouse
SO All can get de egg an de hen ht
can't see me took hit.
| When All was got de nest finish Al
| tink All was look for see how it was
make success, SO All peek through the
knothole. Putty soon one de hen hi
/ was fly on de nest. He lay an egg, ant
poomi it was come roll through de hole
All was make in de nest and den rol
down de spout into de box All wa:
build outside Dat hen was feel kan o.
lazy and don't was hurry about get of
| de nest, but All watch him just de
| same.
Bamby he get up' and step on de edge
of de nest an open he mouth for tt
eacl1le She get de mouth about hal
| open before she see dat dere don't wa:
| be any egg in de nest. Probly she tinl
she forget to lay de egg, cause she 81
right back an try some more. Al
guess me dat All was wait about hal
an hour when out come another egg.
Dis tam de ole hen she begin for t.
cackle before she get off he nest. Whe1
she got off and find here out no egg yol
nevair see one so surprise all you la
| tam O. bah gosh All was laugh me
| All cant most stand up ah was be 81
tired for laugh SO much
She look on top de nest, she look OF
de ground, she get in de nest. but sh'
can't find de egg, SO bamby she shake
his head and tink. All guess she mus
| been dreaming cause she was lay twt
more eggs before he was run dry.
Well sch. All was come on de gro
Gerry store an tell de mans All have go
some hen what lay four egg apiece
hevery day, and dat Pete ant in it, bu
| dey laugh and say All tole more bis
lie lax Pete, All don't care me fol
what dey say cause / get de eggf Al
| don't was tole any one how / don il
| except ma Rosa.
| Hurry up an send me da name Of d<
man for patent ma hensnest.
ANTWINE ROSEAU.
| P. Q.-Don't tell Pete.-EsseX juno
| ton CVt) Record.