The Black Hills union. [volume] (Rapid City, Pennington County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1889-1904, 1898-12-02
TO BE HAPPY IN MATRIMONY
A Woman Of Experience Draws Some
Wise Conclusions.

drunkenness is a thing that can not
very we'll be provided against, nor"3et
can it be made a matter of compromise
II confess that I never had to deal
with it, but I have seen Others try, and
I verify believe hat the gentle hand is
always the strongest hand. Now, gen.
tleness is the very essence of compro-
mise, so even in the home wrecking:
matter the spirit of compromise is be-
lieve to be better than the wilful and
the masterful way. I do not insist
on it, however, because I know not of it
in my personal life, and only speak Of it.
is a distressed observer.
1.-The one curious thing about matri-
monial compromises is that the less
worthy always give up the least. Take
a silly man and a wise woman, and he.
is sure to rule the roost. This would
seem in the fact of it to argue against
compromises. But such is not at all
the case. A marriage in which there is
happiness is a pure democracy, and all
the parties to it must be cut off a bit
and somewhat added to the stature of
the other OF course, it is dreadfully
sad that somewhat of the best should be
sacrificed to the unworthy; it would be
much better the other way But then
life is not a picnic, or if it is it is q
picnic on a rainy day. Still we can
extract a lot that is satisfactory out
OF it If we are more skillful in
antics than the u in the china shop
There are instances, to be sure, where
to effect a compromise the sacrifices
are much too great to be endured. Then
comes sure unhappiness, unhappiness
which it may be is worse than the pain
of making the sacrifices.
II know of an instance. Two young
people We're married just after getting
out of their teens. 1t seemed likely
that they would be happy, as both
were worthy and upright and the hus-
band had no bad habits and was also
blessed with an ample competence
Neither was particularly cultivated,
n so far as education was concerned
they We're on a par. AS they grew old
err it was hard for them to get along
the girl a come from a sprightly
race, the boy from a sedate one. She
loved to sing and dance and be merry.
he, when his work was done, wanted
to sleep. She gave up her singing and
dancing and became as sedate as q.
Quaker. He merely slept after doing
the work in which she had no share.
Deprived of the innocent .gayeties to-
Which she had been accustomed, the
young woman began to read. Having
a quick mind, the reading opened to her
new realms, and in these she lived a..
life in which he could not participate
In cultivation she was soon miles be-
yond him. Among their friends when
he took a holiday from his work ana
his sleep, she shone like a star, while
he sat like a bump on a log, silent, and
when not silent, boorish. He sought.
by little ty%rannies and base cruelties;
TO Cypress the m who was his wife
Well, | won't tell you any more of the
story. 1t had the inevitable end-the,
man went to the bad, went to the bad
because in the beginning he did not
nave the sense to work less and sleep
less-in a word, because it was not i'm
MS nature to compromise, but, on the
contrary to demand everything and
give nothing"
Ihere are several other paragraphs.
IN the. lady's letter all tending to the.
same thing. 1 believe she is quite right.
compromise between the married is as
good as arbitration between nations.
But i DO not him that anything is,
quite so dangerous as an attempt at
arbitration between the married. If
they cannot settle and arrange their
ol1ferences no one can do it for them
Besides, what they know of each other~
Is privileged, and sc long as there is;
no 'pretence of keeping the
that knowledge must be inviolably Sc
cret. l can think of nothing quite Sc.
vie and low as a wife complaining to-
al outsider of her husband except when
a husband speaks in other than words
OF praise of his wife. When the time
10 speak arrives, then the time to part
mas surely come.
l believe sincerely in matrimonial
compromise, but in matrimonial arbi-.
%tration, never.
Chops, birds n dry fish are all
most delicate when broiled in naner
Use heavy white note paper spread:
win olive Oil or butter. When the ar
ticle to be brOi1ed is 1o;d +bo,o ~