The evening times., 1898-09-17
THE TALE
OF p FLAT
1t Is a Sad Warning to Anna
teur Housekeepers.
0nIy Those Who Have Rushed Into
Like Experience Can Appreci-
ate This Tale of Woe.

For sixteen months they had ex-
listed happily on the red carpet, but one
evening Ruffies came in ia;e from her Of
fee and saw Katie curling her hair AT
the glass. Ruffles, so called because she
never can forebear to have some bit of
fiutng even on her shirt waists. threw
herself into the rocking chair that had
lost an arm during the war.
The spinal column of Ruffies suddenly
stifiened and she sat up in her chair.
Say, lets go to housekeeping, anyhow.
I'm clear tired of boarding. We can take
some rooms in a teenty-weenty fiat, have
what we want to eat, and save money.
] used TO know a girl when ] went 10
business college that boarded herself for
81. 10 a week, and she said she had all she
wanted. She used to eat her finger nails
all the time, but ! don't suppose that
was because she was hungry. Lets figure
UP what we would need if he had three
small rooms-parlor bedroom and kitch
en-
kaje got paper and a pencil on which
she gnawed a point when she failed to
discover her knife Rutiies pondered.
First, we must have a table, two rock
ing chairs, two other chairs and a book
case in our parlor-and a rug. Have you
put that down? We will only get the
necessaries first, so we won't put down
couches or pictures. Then in the bed
room there's a bed, another chair and
dresser. Now comes the kitchen. What
If our rooms didn't have a gas stove?"
I'VE could use gasoline" Kate said,
''if it wouldn't blow US up
Wei. We won't worry about The kind
OF stove yet" Ruffies replied. Now. We
must both think of the things that
are used in a kitchen, and after We have
put th-m down we can check off the
Injuries. and only buy the things we
must have Now begin to think"
There was a long period of silence.
then Kate said ''egg-beater," and put it
! on her list.
YES. that's good" Ruffies said. ''and
skille.."
Flat irons" Kate gasped, and made
note of them
Ruffies was thinking. and tying her
forehead in a knOt-'Poker."
Kate wrote the word. and then reccl-
lected that there would be no need Of
d poker with a gasoline stove. ami
crossed il off. Cant you think of any
thing really useful?" she asked, super
ciiously.
"A wooden spoon and a nutmeg CRATER"
Then there was a scattering fire from
both girls. and Kate scratched the names
in shorthand, cake pans ''griddIe."
carving knife" bread board ." tea
kettle salt shaker" dish pam roll
ing PIN 'chopping bowl
There, I think We have down almost
everything" Ruffies said c1mplacently
Kate read the list. and they discovered
that there were no luxuries-al were
necessaries. though Ruffies rather
thought that a nutmeg crater could be
1is-n4n=p1 Kz-i+b
made.
1T is surprising. isn't it. how few
things people really need in housekccp-
/ ing she said Now. on Saturday
afternoon ] will look for rooms. and You
can go 10 lhe department store and
order our furniture and kitchen things,
/ to be delivered carly Monday mornine.
when We've told them where were go
| ing TO live. You'd better buy six Dlates
and two deep dishes, too. I'm glad now
! that j had the souvenir spoon craze
/ and that Aunt Kate gave me that chafing
/ dish. And you've got that slumber
robe and that lace curtain that YOU got
| At such barsain-all these things help
furnish"
They gave notice TO their landlady,
and after a weary afternoon on the
! southside Rufies found two tiny rooms
| attached TO a so-called kitchen. which
was IA IteAilAe a tiOStl WIN q window.
| Early in the day Ruflfes would have
rejected this apartment scornfully, but
! she now pronounced it very cozy'' and
\ paid the agent of the building the first
months rent in advance
She hurried back to the department
store, where she found Kate struggling
with salesman who told her that no
home was complete without a patent
4 pot-lifter that could be converted into a
I IL
weary of battling with the yaIesman. but
RufIies brusquely refused the patent ar
rangement, and asked If the list of nee
essaries had been purchased.
Kate replied that the salesman had
forced her to buy half dozen forks.
Well. I suppose we did forget to men
tion them" Ruffles replied not willing
| to bestow any praise on the salesman s
foresight. but many people get along
without forks out in the nineteenth
ward"
They ordered their goods TO be sent
10 their fiat early on Monday morning
and went to their boarding house to
| spend the last Sunday on the despised
red carpet and 20 pack their trunks.
On Monday morning each arose with
a violent headache, which obliged her to
telephone to the others employers that
their stenographer was too i'll to report
for duty. Il kope our Office boy won't
| remember your voice" Ruffies said as
they left the pubic telephone station.
Ever since that time ] was silly enough
to try TO disguise my voice when l stayed
away TO go to the picnic he has been
awfully suspicious of me-
''Wei. I'm sure my head does ache, -
Kate answered She had q conscience
that frequently drove her to bromo selt-
zer during her festal Illnesses.
They hurried out to their fat which
Kate criticised severely. It looked mean
and ugly enough to Ruffies. but she de-
Tended it. What do you expect for 81
a month" she asked sarcasticaIly, "a
tied bathroom and hardwood fioors?"
The furniture arrived and there was a
time of hustle and confusion. The four
chairs and table were arranged in the
SKIP parlor, the chatting dish was set on
the mantel, and then it was discovered
that the gasoline stove had been forgot
ten. Ruffies went down town to buy it.
while Kate spread the rug in the bedroom
and ran around 10 the corner grocery to
| lay in a supply of provisions. She bought
2 sack of -four, some sardines, cheese. a
dozen eggs and some butter.
1t was quite noon when Ruffies returned
in triumph with the stove, a red-faced
man and a can of gasoline The red
faced man explained the working of tbs
stove. said that a child of one year could
! operate ii without danger. and then he de.
parted. He left ii lighted, and the house
was soon permeated with the delightful
oder of gasoline.
Now, let's cook our first meal in oul
own home" Ruffies cried. She took of
her sailor and rolled up her sleeves
What shall we cook?"
Il bought eggs and I thought yor
might know how 10 make some kind OF