The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1898-06-02

"A sthrateejan," said Mr.. Dooley, in re-
Spouse to Mr.. Hennessy's request for in
formation, according to the Chicago
Journal, Us a champeen checker player.
Whin tn war broke out me friend Mack
wint TO me frind Hanna, an says he
What he says, what can we do to
cr-rush tn naughty power Nv Spain he
says an bring this hateful war to i
early conclusion?' he says. Mobilize tn
checker-players,' says Hanna. An from
all CORNERS iv tn country they've gone
TO Washin ton, where they're called tn
sthrateejy board.
Day an night they set in room, with
a checker-board on tn end iv a -four bari
an study problems iy tn navy. At night
Mack drops in. Well, boys says he
how goes tn battle? he says. Glory
GUS says tn sthrateejy board Two
more moves an We'll be in tn king row.
All says Mack. this is too good to be
thrue, he says. In but a few brief min
yits tn dhrinks'H be on Spain he says
Have We any plans fr SIMPSONS feet?'
he says. Where is itY says tn sthrateejy
board I dnnaw, says Mack Good
Spanish fleet says they. 'Bombardin'
Boston, at Cadz, in San June de Matzoon,
sighted near tn gas house be our special
correspo. 1ent' "A sthrong position says
tn sthrateejy board. Undoubtedly tn
fleet is headed south to attack and seize
10 sail North as fast as he can an lay in
a supply iv ice.
" Tn summers comm on. INSTRUCT
Schley to put on all steam an thin put in
off again. an call US up be telephone,
wanst. They must be no indecision
Where's four mules to Tampa, to Mobile,
to Chicenmaha, to Coney Island, TO Ire
land, to III divvle an r-rush thin back
again. Don't r-rush thin. Ordher Samp-
son to pick up tn cable at Lincoln Park
an run into tn BARN. Is tn balloon
corpse r-ready? 1t is? Thin don't sind it
up. Sind it UP. Have tn Mulligan
Guards cooperate with Gomez, an tell
him 10 cut away his whiskers. They've
got tangled in tn riggin'. We need yell
low fever troops. Have We amy yellow
fever in tn house? Give it to twinty
thousand three hundred men an sind
thin afther Gov nor Tanner.
" Teddy Rosenfelt's R-rough R-riders
ARE downstairs havin' their uniforms
pressed. Ordher thin to the goluf links
at wanst. They must be no INDIGESTION.
Where's Richard Harding Davis? On tn
bridge iv tn New York? Turin tn bridge.
Seize inral Miles uniform. We must
strenthen tn gold resarve. Wher's TIL
Gussie? Runnin' off to Cuba with wan
hundred man an arms, iv coorse. oh,
war is dhreadful thing! It's ye'er move,
Claude says the sthrateejy board
An so it goes on, an day be day we
r-read tn tur-ribe story iv our brave
sthrateelans sacrificin their time on tn
altar iv their country, as Hogan says. Lit
tie we thought whin we wnt into this war
iv tn horros it wud bring. Little we
thought iv tn mothers at home weepin'
FIR their brave boys down at Washin' ton
hur-tin their poor eyes over a checker
board. Little we thought iv these devoted
men, as Hogan says, with achin' heads,
plannin' to sind three hundred thousand
millyon men an a carload iv beans to their
fate at Tampa, Fla. But some wan must
be sacrificed, as Hogan says. An these
poor fellows in Washin' ton with their fred
eyesan' their tired backs will be an exam
pie TO futre ginerauons, as Hogan says, iv
how an American soldiers can face his
jooty when he has to an how he can't
whin he hasn't to-
Dewey AMT a sthrateejan?" inquired
Mr.. Hennessy.
No said Mr. Dooley. Cousin George
is a good ma-an an I'm very fond iv him.
more be raison iv his dom that Mayo bos-
thoon Pat Mountjoy, but he has. low
tastes. We never cud make a sthrateejan
Nv him. They'se a kind iv a vulgar fight
in sthrain in him that makes him want
to go out an slug some wan wanst a
month. I'm glad he amt in Washin'ton
TIL chances ar-re he'd go to tn sthrateejy
board an pull it's hair