davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
yiscissitudes of Journalism.

For the past two years have on
deavored to furnish the readers OF the
Press with the news from this place and
hope that l have not failed TO interest
some OF the many readers with my wan
dering paragraphs. With this issue Will
bid the Press and readers adieu from
this place and seek more lucrative po-
sition in another ciime.-F1oyd Va)
Press
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
stannton,s Annlsersary.

sTAUNTON, VA. Aprll Especial :.
A large meeting Of citizens wes held
tonight In Columbian Hall for the pur-
nose OF making arrangements to 'saitably
observe the one hundred ana tft!eth an
nlversary OF the city OF Staunton. Tao
celebration will take place on July fih.
az which time the city viii have seen her
one hundred and hlticth birthday. The
meeting was an enthusiasts one.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
All He Ncedrd.

"Why don't you caii me a donkey and
have done with IL? You've limited at II
long enough" he snarled out.
at wouldn't be quite true" she re-
piled.
81 suppose not. suppose I haven't
ears enough for that animal he retorted
sarcasticaQy.
aOh. yes you have" she returned
sweetiy. 'You don't need any more
ears
,,Whas DO ! need. thenrs, NJ
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The washington Post says "one man
was killed and several dangerously IN
iured in a negro funeral procession at
Richmond. Thus has It been demonstra-
ted that n funeral procession Is as dan
gerous as a parlor social or cake walk
stm in this land Of liberty the colored
man has a right to his own pursuit OF
happiness.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
Not So Warm.

81 don't think the professor makes a
very ardent wooer?
mo. his love for Ada Is of-er-that
profound nature. Their affections VIII
not melt and run together, but rather
connect and freeze. "-Philadeiphia North
American.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
Poor All Around.

Doetor-"Do you know that the ma
iority OF physicians are comparatively
poor men,
Gibbs-"No, I wasn't aware OF that;
but I know some OF them are awfully
poor doctors" -Tit-Bits.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
To Mine the HarbOrs.

PETERSBURG. VA, April 7.-Speciai-
A detachment OF twenty-five artilierymen
passed through here tonight from WASH.
ington en- route for Savannah ana
Charleston 10 place mines in the haroors
at those places.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
All lIOOnshine

"Uncle Sans" boys made a rad
through here Saturday night-cut down
one still" several tubs, and caught two
bows mapping. Boys, you must be on
the watch better next time.-Stuart CVa)
Enterprise.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
THAT Is EASY.

The Savannah Morning News notes the
fact mat the cruiser Columbia went 10
sna the other day twenty-five per cent.
short in her complement Of men. That
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
Reliable War News.

"Why. Julia. how the waist OF your
frock smells of tar?'
Eyes, mamma; poor Mr.. Ratllhes' OF the
Naval Reserves. has been bidding me good
~, again ''-i1eyeland Pl6in Dealer
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

Jack-Did she get mad when you kissed
her on tho cheek?
rom-Her wrath was terrible 10 be-
hold.
JacK-What did she say?
Tom-Asked me IL there was anything
the matter with her lips.-New York
Evening Journal
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
ADVICE TO TOBACCO PLANTERS

We print elsewhere an article from the
Southern Tobacconist, OF Richmond, an
article on the cultivation of Virginia leaf
for the Austrian trade. which planters
throughout the dark tobacco belt will do
well to study.
The Austrian trade demands the finest
dark-red wrapper leaf. of fine grain dell
cate texture and good spread. The to-
bacco Is used in the manufacture OF cigars
in South Germany. Italy and Austria, and
the demand for It IS so great that the
difficulty is to find It in sufficient quanti-
ties to Ill orders.
II commands a good price and planters
who will produce it according TO direc-
tions will strike it rich.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

II there are any good clerks who want
a lob where under the law there is moth
inr TO do but draw salary they can apply
to Hon. Joseph T. Lawless.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

Mckinley must have chucked to him.
self at the assemblage Of all the diplomats
begging him not to fight.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The Legislature tried to abolish the po-
siiion of Register Of the Land Office, but
failed. Their day Of convening and ad-
isurning was wisely fixed before hand.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

In the preliminary skirmish some OF the
Stuart Horse Guards give evidence OF be-
ing tireless warriors.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

Another awful benzine explosion and
this time q man was kindling a fire with
It. The servant girl seems to have learn
ed better.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The Madrid date line got in a little late
but 1t is pushing Key West might nara
these days for superior guessing.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

Senior Polo Bernabe viii observe thai
he is expected TO play second fiddle in the
concert of the Powers.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

Glasgow has 100000 inhabitants and
only 4s4 doctors. People will thrive If
they are properly protected.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

And now the concert of the Powers is
being given on our stage.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

II will be observed that in robbing the
Broad-street stores the thieves avoided
the corner buildings.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
IL Seemed So.

Sunday School Teacher-"why did Eve
eat the appleY'
Bright Pupli-"Because the Lord told
her not to."-Puck.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

only married men are being taken in
the artillery regiments because the mar
ried ones have contented the habit Of
pleading for peace. perhaps.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The recent Texas primary elections re-
suited as usual in taking few names of
the poll books forever
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

Chicago has at last defeated a majority
Of her Doodle alderman, but she has prob
ably added to her regularly employed
footpads.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The Cincinnati has run aground on
mud bank. This is one phase of the sit
nation at least that is grounded on fact
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
ro crRr coLp Ix oNr DAY.

Take Laxative Brono Quinins Tabists.
All druggists refund the money Il Il fail
10 cure, &c, The gepulpe has L. u Q, "a
each tablet.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

Steve Brodle's death seems TO have
been given out on strictly a war news
basis.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
FOR DISEASES OF THE LIVER,
STOMACH AND KIDNEYS.

the Water OF the Greenbrier White Sui
pnur Springs is the most valuable In
America. Purcell, Ladd & Co.. wholesale
agents.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The price of The Times is two cents per
cony and ten cents per 1eek, or II paid
monthly, 90 cents per MONTH denver"
within tho limits of Richmond ana MAI
chester. Sunday paper three cents
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The Senate has adjourned again. Why
not make IT permanent?
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

DO you want homer Reed thA big
ad on Page g.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

more legs and batter voice. "-Har
lem Life.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08
TIMES BUILDING.
TENTH AND BANK STREETS.
nIcaAOND. VA.

MANCHESTER BUREAU. 1in HULL
STREET.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The T!hes IS always Indebted 10 TREND and
who favor II with society items in s 1,,h
personals. but must urge that a., The
be sent over the slgha'uiV
AN unsigned communications will be re-
jected always
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

PETERSBURG AGENT, S; c. :, H ~ III
fNsON. Z LOMBARD STREET,
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

The Louisville Courier-Journal suggests
Fitzhugh Lee as the first President o.
Cuba.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

THE DAILY TUNES is server by carriers
on their own account in this CITY anu
Manchester. for 10 cents week Wnen
paid weekly. but SOC. per month. wheil
paid monthly. by mail. outside OF
Richmond 20 cents a month. SoW
year anywhere in the United states
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-08

. The railroads centering in Birmingham
report a larger business in March than In
March, 1897.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
The Shy Little Pair.

Concerning war taxes, another man
contributed, II have to say that If all the
counting that is carried on on the trolley
cars could be taxed our war debt would roll
away like water off ducks back. Last
Sunday night l got on the Illinois-street
cars, and as rode l noticed quaint little
boy and girl who sat right in front of me.
He was a little cut-short boy about thirteen
years old, wearing a grown-up coat, and
hat that looked borrowed from his father;
his arms were folded across his breast, and
he had on a sedate, even severe manly ex-
preston. The little girl was about eleven,
and she was equally sedate and mature in
a ppearance-one of these pinched-nose
blonde little girls who look as if they were
born elderly and well-behaved. l casually
decided they were little brother and sister
going home from church together, but, bless
you, on closed inspection / saw that her
little white hand was nestled in the square
brown paw which he protruded from his
side, under his folded arms. The folded
arms were only clever dodge, and the
shy little couple were sweethearts, holding
hands as they rode. Soon they grew FESTIVE
under my observation and gravely ate cara
mels out of a paper bag. When I left the
car, however, his manly pose Of folded arms
was resumed, and they were again in their
quaint little Cupid's fairyland-a little cut
short boy and wizened little blonde girl
holding hands,"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21

When the lady who hadn't said anything
was asked what made her so quiet, she re-
piled: "Oh, I'm all worn out; this is the
hardest summer ever spent in my life. Did
you ever borrow horse? Well, don't ever
be tempted to do such a foolish thing. When
my married daughter went away for the
summer she said: Now, mother, we want
you to have good time while we are gone
so we will lend you Billy and the surrey
or course, you know Billy is a triie lively,
and has to be driven every day, but Jim
will drive for you, and you can have ride
every evening. Now, that seemed a very
pleasant prospect, doesn't it? Well, just
wait until you try taking a ride every even
ing. whether you want to or not. AT first
did really enjoy it, but after l had taken
out to ride with me the few friends who
have stayed at home during the hot weather
it began to be a bore. Every night here
came black Jim with Billy and the surrey.
and every night my young cook Sarah
would attack me indoors and force me to
go. She would say: Come, now, Mrs.
Badger; there's the horse and here's your
bonnet. Mis- Cora said you must go ridin'
every night, so come on, now The horse
is lively and I'm nervous, so my summer
pleasure has been very tiresome. I'll be
glad when my daughter comes home"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
A Friendly Suggestion.

Among the cheerful martyrs of this world
very large people must surely be enum-
Grated at the head of the class. ''Of course
I'm sensitive about my size" said the
stoutest lady; who wouldn't be? But 7
think l had my severest shock this week
when went to buy new brocaded silk
gown. The man behind the silk counter
very courteously showed me his entire
stock and was undecided between a black
brocade and a wine color and dark erean
brocade. AS I pondered the matter tbe
clerk patiently waited; but he finally leaned
towards me and said in a subdued tone of
gracious social wisdom. mingled with do
nestle discernment:
Madam, if were in your place 1 would
take the colored brocade; it will make YOU
an elegant gown-wine color is always ele-
gant-and then when you get tired of it
you know, you can cover all your parlor
chairs with it,"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
An Obsolete Trade.

There are peddlers and peddlers," the
elderly gentleman from down East re-
marked, "but in old-time Yankeeland we
used to have a peddler that have never
seen or heard of anywhere else. He was
the yeast pedder, and came around
through the farm lands twice week with
great regularity. In his little old cart was
barrel full of yeast from the England rum
dstilleries, and in the barrel was a long
cane with half-pint cup or measure fast
ened to it. He stopped at every farm ard
sold to every farm wife the little measure
of yeast for l cent He generally brought
a little news or neighborhood gossip with
him. and was a welcome visitor. There is
no modern tradesman who fills a more use
full station in life than that old Connecticut
yeast peddler."
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
He nidn,f Worrv.

The middle-aged man who was sitting on
the railing fiicked the ashes from his cigar,
and then said: This dont-worry movement
isn't anything new; there always have been
people who take life easy, and there always
will be. When I was a boy / lived in a
small town which had just one good grocer
one man who kept an up-to-date stock of
goods and sold at fair, honest prices. Well,
in the summer time that man used to shut
up his grocery every afternoon at ! o'clock
sharp and go to bed. His store doors were
locked and bolted, and you couldn't buy a
match or a potato of that man until 3
o'clock. At that time he would open his shop
again, put out his barrels of vegetables and
his baskets of fruit and begin all over
again. His trade was brisk, the whole town
knew his peculiar way Of doing business,
and he PROBABLY never lost any money by
retiring for two hours of sleep. In the win
ter. of course, he kept open all day. His
health was always good he made fair
living, and left his family enough money
to quarrel over when he, died. In my opin-
ion he was the original don't worry organ
iZation-a club of one"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
MERE PLEASANTLY.
Told ON the Porch.

1--WE often think we stand well with the
whole world remarked a comfortable
looking dowager in a lace cap, land just
about that time something happens to take
down our pride. Last week my daughter
came to visit me, bringing her two lovely
children, little joe and pet Mary. NV
daughter is not well and 1 make her take
a nap every afternoon. Yesterday little Joe
got obstreperous while she was mapping
and said in lordly manner: L want nv
mamma She's asleep, joe 1 said, and
you mustn't disturb her. He continued his
demand for his mother in such a noisy
fashion that I had to speak decidedly to
him and forbid him making any further
clamor. At this he struck a warlike atti-
tude, legs astride, fists doubled up, eyes
glaring, and said: Grandmother You're
the meanest old lady on the whole earth.
First time catch you standing up I'm 60
ing to knock you down. Then piped in
delicate four-year-old Mary, her fists
doubled up. too. Yes, an I'll help him.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21

Down at Chickamauga the other day." a
travelling man said, "a lot of men We're
talking about the yellow fever, and the
prospects Of its getting into this country
this year. One of the soldiers, a young
Irishnan, seemed SO concerned and appre-
hensive that his comrades could not resist
the temptation to rlay on his fears
Eyes, indeed. one man exclaimed, 1--WE
are going to have yellow jack here this
year-and we are going to have it bad I'll
bet every immune in this camp will have
yellow fever this year. "Begorra," the
Irishman said, turning paler-"then the
holy saints ii have to look out fer us; if
them mmunes gifts tn yellow fever-begor-
ra-wesll all git it,"
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21

Harper.s Bazaar.

harper bdzar
This is the story that was brought hack
by young person who had spent a morn.
Ing at a hospital in Auburn. N. Y.
While / was there a man and a won,n n
came in, bringing burned child in a blan.
ket 1t turned out that the man didn't
know the woman, nor the woman the man
and neither knew the child. AS the womar
was riding on an open trolley car on her
way TO the hospital. she heard shrek and
saw child in a dooryard with its dress
afire.
she jumped off the car, grabbed a bIan.
ket which hung on a clothesline, wranned
Ii around the child and rolled ii on fhe
ground. The child's mother came out III
the house and picked the child up. Thai
started the fire again. The rescuer instant.
IN grabbed the child from the mother. rolled
il on the ground In the blanket some more
and then ran with ii to the car, got aboard
and brought II % the hospital. The mar
MaS -, ~ 80, - e MY Happened e
block or 50 from the car to the hospital
The child was badly burned. but will re-
cover. Don't you think that womans wits
were pretty QuIckg
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
Served Him Right.

I'VE had a great time at our house this
afternoon. but don't suppose my wife will
want to tell about it. Sd will tell it,"
Now, Henry, don't you tell that" the
young matron expostulated.
Yes I will, too" said Henry. Mother
and Julia always sit around every after
noon in the hot weather in sacQue and petit
coat; all married people present know what
sacque and petticoat is, and those who are
not married can get married and find out.
Wen. we have new maid, and about 2
o'clock mother heard the maid ushering 4
man in through the hall Julia heard him.
too. and had time TO ny into the closet. but
mother had TO sit still in sacque and petit
coat The man turned out to be a book
agent. He didn't seem frightened at the
white sacque and petticoat. but sat himself
DOWN and talked and talked, after the man
ner lof his kind. Mother just let him talk.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
He died Lieutenant of H. NJ. S. Weymouth,
A. d. 1928, aged AZ years.

'
This tablet is erected near Selkirk's lookout
by Commodore Powell and the officers
of H. M. S. Topaz, A. d. 1868.
The unnhabited Galapagos islands of the
coast of Ecuador have more recently had an
Alexander Selkirk. This mas was deserted
by his companions, and when found years
afterward he was quite naked and was car
rying a pig on his back. He had lived upon
fruits and roots, and had caught wild cat
tie in traps and had killed them with spear
made of a pocket knife tied to stick. His
hut was made Of the hides of such cattle, of
which there were a number on the island,
having been left there three years ago. when
the place was used as a penal colony for
Ecuador.
MONEY FROM A DUNGHILL.
Other interesting islands are found in the
great archipelago which lies between here
and Cape Horn. These shall travel among
on my way around the southern end CT
South America. The most interesting of al
the Pacific islands, however. are the Guano
islands. They are, in proportion to their
size, the richest islands of the world, for
they have already added more than 81 O0O,-
100000 to the worlds wealth. Think of pull
ing billion dollars out of dunghll. That
is what Peru has dug out of her guano isl
ands. Her creditors are getting something
out of them to-day, although nothing like
the enormous sums realized in the past
These guano islands are scattered all along
the coast of Peru. ] first saw them north
of Lima. near the shores of Salavary. and
at Pacasmayo guano ship from the Lobos
islands came in for mail and provisions
Off the Bay of Pisco, Peru / saw the IA
NOUS Chincha islands, which have produced
more than twelve million tons of this bird
manure, and have brought into the Peru
Wan treasury millions upon millions of dol
lars. The shipping of guano is going on
from these islands to-day, although the de-
posits are to a large extent exhausted. The
American firm of Grace e. Co. of Lima.
has the contracts for loading the ships
and they have docks and machinery at the
various islands for getting the guano out
of the earth and on to the vessels. / am
told that the shipments of the current year
will not probably exceed $1,000 tons.
The Guano islands are merely masses of
volcanic rocks which have risen up out of
the ocean. They have not blade Of grass
nor any green thing on them, and are mere
ly rocky islands covered with a ragged
white deposit. 1t never rains upon them.
and for thousands of years the manure upon
them lay and grew in quantity from age
to age. For some reason or other, the
ps'licans. sea guIIs and other birds which
feed BY the millions in the waters Of these
parts OF the world have chosen these ISL
ailds IS their nightly roosting places. They
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21

and finally discerning that he wasn't sell
ing any books. the agent arose to go.
Mother sat still in sacque and petticoat, and
the poor man, laundering among the num-
erous doors in the room, lost his bearings
and opened the door into the closet. There
stood Julia-in sacque and petticoat."
Now. Henry. do STOP" said Julia.
Go on" shouted the laughing porch par
ty; how did the man finally get out?"
Nobody remembers said Henry.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
A Friend in Need.

Washington Star.
II don't know what I'd have done" said
the Santiago SDaniard '.if 1t hadn't been
for that optimistic friend of mine"
He encouraged you to hold out to the
bitter end?"
mo. When we were tired and hungry we
was always saying. Cheer up; wei be CON-
Quered In a few days
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
Locating Trouble.

Baby Frances hasn't had much experience
in this great world of sensations, conse-
quently she was profoundly at a loss when,
in riding out with her father the other
evening, dead animal wagon was passed
A strange expression crept over her face,
and it grew stranger as the disagreeable
odor became more dense; then the little
three-year-old maiden excitedly exclaimed:
Papa, papa, let's go home to mamma,
quick-there's somepin' awful the matter
with my nose!'
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21
Rad Aim.

Detroit Free Press
Not a single book that have written
has made HIT"
Fms you must have some SnaFisr hInos
In your veins 1920
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-21

He was landed from the Cirque Ports gal
ley, So tons, is guns. A. D. 1704. and
was taken off in the Duke, pri-
Vateer, 18th Frebuary, 17O9.