The San Francisco call., 1898-01-30

| go wild at the sight of fresh meat? How could 1t have been borne in upon | them in advance that Denver becomes intoxicated at the prospect of a square meal and gets delirium tremens if the meal is to be free? When the horde attacked the barbecue they simply walked through it. Tn their enthusi- asm they did not pause to eat No- body had time to eat. Did one get a slice of beef another snatched it, and in ensuing fights the flower of the city was bathed in the steaming marrow of the beasts slain to make a holiday. The | dull thud of the ham bone as it pelted in the gaping countenance of the rash and hungry, the smash of hunk of sirloin against the breasts of the brave was sickening. Strong policemen look ed and then turned around, deeming 1 it better to get swatted in the back than to have their bosoms unused with gravy. Even the militia, accustomed to scenes of carnage, stole away on the dead run. A barbecue in Denver might be success if the guests were but chained to posts first and fed by means 1 of pitchforks. I fear that comedy town | is degenerate. It has always been re- garded as proper there to raid a Chi nese procession graveyard-b bound. and snatch the funeral baked meats, but l supposed this was due to racial preju- dice and the sheer joy of stealing, and at times when 1 have witnessed such affairs, being there in the capacity of society reporter, observed that the gen. tlemen engaged had the presence of mind to eat what they stole. They were enthusiastic, but not frenZied. l can imagine barbecue to be more en- | ticing than a solitary roast pig, and the people flocking thither licking their chops. But cannot imagine why they refused to eat Perhaps Denver is get ting too refined. The absence of nap- kins from a function so dignifed may have proved irritating.
 With all the respect to Dr. Hall he may merit, wish to place on record a 1 feeling of disregard for the jurymen who failed to convict him of murder Not that I charge him with being guilty, for I do not know, but I would be perfectly willing to have some chaps convicted on general principles, and Hall is enc of these chaps.
 l Cruz
 ] He publishes paper there wherein to hide | the news.
 And to disport from time to time his own
 peculiar views.
 Oh, all know Dune. McPherson well, so blithe
 and sweet he sings.
 So gayly dips in stinkpot loud the hurting
 dart he slings,
 Or scars in meter like a bird equipped with
 busted wings.
 Mayhap he writes jingle for to grace the
 daily Punk,
 May be he gives in halting prose the thoughts | he hasn't thunk;
 l In either case he makes 1t clear that he's what
 rhymes with Dune.
 Private Jones of the regular army deserves a medal. He is the young sol dier who extinguished the sparks which were burning their way through a woolen bag containing fifty pounds of powder. He had every reason to be- lieve that his bravery would be fatal, yet he recognized the scant possibility that he might save his comrades, and he did it, expecting no reward. Rarely is there such an exhibition of presence of mind, and no act could have been braver.
 Not possessing scientific knowledge, confess with shame an entire inability to see any sense in grating one insect upon another. It is peculiar thing to do, of course and novelty has charms. It isi true that when bugs are thus united till death do them part, their blending into a beauteous whole makes | h,,cr hod txUn ha- fore, certainly theoretical improve ment; yet the fact must not be disre- garded that the one bug is a whopper apt to have double set of incisors. To equip a biting bug with twin heads or bestow upon the hornet the boon of a pair of tails may be scientific, but should think science would rather be doing something else Perhaps, how ever the hornet is not classed among insects. It may be bird. The flea is an insect, beyond question, and even now is a thing of terror. Give the flea an extra set of legs and springs, an extra lot of augers, chisels and drills and would life be worth living? If the man of science can divorce his atten- tion from the creation of freaks a mo- ment would like him to answer. There | is an intimation that the experiments tend to open an endless field. If the mortal part of a bug can be amputated from himself and annexed to something else, there appears no reason why In the exuberance of investigation the sci enlist should not soon have the ele- phant wearing the camePs hump, giver in exchange for a trunk. And there does not flash on the startled intelli- gence reason why scientist of a jo- cose disposition might not catch 6 friend asleep and cause to spring from his head a donkey's ears, to be last. ing joy. To get back to the starting place, do not like bugs, but so far a. the association is inevitable, believe the old-fashioned bug would be my choice. The scientist may bend his en ergies to the manufacture of new. fangled ones, but remain true to tht Junebug of memory, the striped beetle of youth, the warm and enter l