The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1898-08-16
OH, F|E! CHIEF MURPHY.
Mayor Hoos Finds Green
Goods Flourishing in
Montgomery Street.

Clerk George Bouton was sitting in his
office in the Street and Water Board, at
the City Hall. this morning. when in
bounced President Anthony Hauck actual
" pale with excitement, and an Pve-got-
a-pfece-of news for you look on his face.
Heard the news?" painted Mr. Hauck.
NO; what is it?''' replied Mr.. Bouton,
locking up from his desk.
Mayor Hoos has began the other
when Mr. Bouton listlessly interrupted
with
Another veto I suppose
sOh, dear, no; just wait until / finish.
He has actually discovered green goods
ficurishing in Montgomery street, in open
daylight, too. if you please; and UNDER
stand that his Honor has written to you
about it, said President Hauck.
Written to mer almost shrielxed
the Clerk, jumping from his seat and
vehemently exclaiming, Now by all the
heather gods and goddesses without
skirts or bodices, what in thunder have I
to do with green goods fiourishing in
Jersey City streets?''
Perhaps His Honor thinks it rightly
belongs to the Committee on Streets and
ssor to the Committee on Pumping sar-
castically rejoined the Clerk, ..for its won
derful how those green goods chaps pump
the money out Of the come ons'. But
why does His Honor honor me with the
communication about green goods. He
ought to send that to the police. Guess
I'll ring up Chief Murphy" and suiting
the action to the word Clerk Bouton
seized the telephone rang the bell and
shouted
Hello, Central, give me SO, Police Head
quarters
rs that headquarters" he shouted and
some one answered Yes.
Il want to speak to Chief Murphy. Oh,
is that you Chief? Well, do you know
that | am told that Mayor Hoos has dis
covered green goods fourishing in day
light on Montgomery street. That's one
on you old man." chuckled Mr.. Bouton,
putting up the receiver, while Chief
Murphy sent for his detectives and lee
tured them for their lack of vigilance and
ordered them out double quick to inves-
tigate.
In the meantime, while Clerk Bouton
and President Hauek were talking about
the impending blaze and the letter which
His Honor would send to, the police, one
of the clerks outside brought IN a letter
from the Chief Executive himself
Didn't I tell you said Mr.. Hauck
triumphantly to the clerk, who tore open
the envelope and then read aloud -
To the Honorable the Board of Street
and Water Commissioners
Gentlemen-I most respectfully call
your attention to the dfsreputahle
condition of the sidewalks on both
sides of Montgomery street, from
Monmouth street to Summit ayenuei Il
they would do credit to a newly dis
covered region. They look like mfia-
ture forests covered as they are with
tail grass and weeds Your honorable
Board should Immediately designate
two men 10 go there with scythes to
cut down this unsightly grass.
Trusting that you viii give 1t your
earliest attention, | am
Yours respectfully,
EDWARD HOOS, Mayor.
The President and the Clerk stared help
lessly at each other and the long silence
was only broken by the former muttering
something about going out and having a
beverage, the name of which rhymes with
Mickey: it isn't Irish, though, although
YOU can use that brand.