davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Taking off her sunbonnet, she shook it
several times to attract his attention,
but he did not happen TO be looking
in that direction. Then she called, in
a shrill voice:
''Josiari"
He looked up from the checker board
and awaited further Overtures.
Amt you afraid you'll miss the
train?"
IT'S missed"
How'll you git to town.
'Ain't goin'."
why didn't you come over to Cousin
Jud's and git the wagon SOS you could
go home an go 10 work.
It's gittin' kind o. late an thought
there want no use o. putterin' aroun
doin' part of a days work. Seems sort
O. shifless like"
How did you come to miss the
train?"
Il didn't miss it. I happened to think
o. somethin' an let it go past. I re-
was Friday. an Fridays a terrible I'M
lucky day. 1 wouldn't O made no head
way in 6 lin someone to contract for
garden truck, eff l started on Friday.
It's gittin' kind o. fur into the month
anyhow. 1 guess I'll write 'em two or
three letters an tell 'em to be on the
lookout fur me about the LIST of Au-
gust"
She dismounted from the wagon,
went into the store across the road and
came out with an almanac.
The 1st of August comes on Sun
day." she said.
well, some other day'n do jes' as
we'll"
Fridays the only day ASH skeer
your" she inquired.
well, Saturday amt so very lucky
neither. They do say that when you
start suthin' on Saturday ye're lrble to
die before We git it finished
II guess that's purity nigh true in
your case. Look here. In August
there's five Sundays, five Saturdays an
four Fridays, not countin Thursday,
the 18th, which 1 jedge is wussn all
of 'em put together"
He assented with a nod.
There's Is days" she went on, after
a mental calculation, ''or half the
month. when you don't feel safe in
doin' anythin'."
He made no answer.
well, jump in the spring wagon an
less go home. There's aIlus somethin'
to be thankful fur. I'm glad it's super
stition that ails We and not laziness.''
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Two Old Maids.

There were three of them, says the New
York Press; two old-fashioned women
and their quaint little maid, woh carried
the bags and tried to help the ladies
along. The youngest of the three must
have been over 20. They had come down
on the West Shore road, and, taking a
cross-town car, got out to change for a
Boulevard car at Seventh avenue and
Forty-Second street. At their ages, natur-
ally, these women could not move very
last. and the car was detained mo-
ment.
Step lively. therer' shouted the con-
ductor; come, get move on your
Step lively, you idiot?" piped out the
diminuL4ve maid, in such a funny little
voice. They look as though they could
step lively, don't they? Wait till you get
to be their age and see how lively YOU will
step. You q better get down kld help with
these bags" But the conductor did not
help; he chung to the bell strap and with
scant courtesy barely waited until the old
ladies We're seated. Then. with an angry
pull, he rang the bell and With a jerk the
car started.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Believed In Short Engagement.

At the big midsummer wedding, one
of the ushers, who is good deal of a
cynic. was rather unfortunate in the
phrasing of his fluctuations TO his
friend, the groom, says the San Fran
cisco News Letter.
Now, old boy" facetiously remarked
the usher. who would rather have been
bending over his ledger in the bank
than officiating at a wedding. Il hope
that you will not find marriage a fail
ure.,'
Il hope not, indeed" was the ready
rejoinder, for the chief reason I
brought the courtship to such sud
den close was that the engagement
would soon have made a bankrupt of
mel"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
a SONG FOR THE sAILoR-MEN.

Now it's hail to the commander,
And it, hail to the valiant fieeti
And it's hail TO the guns that thundere'
Through the battles lurid heat!
But well not forget the sailors,
So it's sailor-men, hurrahi
It's your countrys hand we give you,
For TO shake your grimy paw.
The sailor-men, the sailor-men,
The men who fought below,
The gunners and the striplings
And the naVVieS we don't know
But it's hail to them and Honor
Wreath her roses round their fame;
For twas them that did their duty
When the cannon spoke their flannel
o, cheer the mighty commodore,
The credit is his due,
And cheer the under officers,
The gunners and the crew.
But don't forget the sailOr-men,
Who fought me fight below.
Where the devil lit his furnace,
And they hadn't any show.
The sailor-men, the sailor-men,
A flag we'll fly for them.
And the girls will wreath the roses
In a gaudy diadem;
For to crown the seaman's valor
And to honor them that sweat,
Where the devil lights his furnace
And the bloody decks are wet.
Now it's hail unto the commodore,
The captains, and all that.
But we shant forget the underlings,
Or be they Mike or Pat;
For they fought the fight with valor-
Here's your country's hand to you,
Every hearty lad that's numbered
In the squadron's noble crew.
The sailor-men, the sailor-men,
The lowest and the high,
With heart for any duty
Though that duty be to die
Here's a cheer across the valleys.
And an echo Ger the hills;
For the land from hill to valley
With your splendid triumph thrills!
Yea, hail the grimy sailor-man.
And sure he's got a breast
That's filled with love of country
And it S hail him with the rest;
For the fires he kept a-burning,
And the guns he kept awake,
And the sweet life that he offered
F. or his darlin' countrys sake
o, the sailor-man, the sailor-manl
When all is said and done.
At Manila or wherever
Nalors bloody race is run,
He's deservin' of affection;
For, behold the commodore
Without the grimy~ sailor-man
Can't make the cannon roar.
baltimore News.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
TILE SALT LAKE HERAIlr MONDAY, SEPTEMBER ae. 1895

was the most available for his use.-
says the New Orleans Times-Democrat.
He sat down in the space, squeezing
the small boy nightly.
Say" protested the possible future
president of the United States, SUD
pose you went by weight, you'd pay
three fares, wouldn't you?"
And suppose you went by weight
said the fat man, with a snort and
scowl, do you suppose the motorman
would stop the car for your"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
HAD A ROUGH TIME OF 1T
CAPTAIN NOBLE RETURNS FROM
CUBA TO RECUPERATE.
Captains Noble, Allen, McFarlane
and Lassiter of the Old Sixteenth
First On Top Of San Juan Hill.

Captain Noble of the gallant Six
teolth is in the city. He looks a little
wan physically, but mentally he is the
same old affable man. Captain Noble
says he would not trade off six feet of
good American earth for the whole is
land Of Cuba, so far as he is concerned.
He wants no more of it.
Captain Noble had rough time of it.
He had yellow fever and dysentery at
the same time. The officers thought [
was a conner" he said, land had my
Obituary all fixed up; but 1 weathered
her, and here am, satisfied to be hon, q
again.
He Will remain in the city until Tues
DAY, when he will go to Boise. Captain
Noble was one of the conspicuous fig
ures in the storming of San Juan hill.
He and Captain Allen, Captain Nc
karlane and Captain Lassiter were first
on the top with their commands Las
sitter was shot and severely wounded.
Captain Morrison was killed before the
apex was reached. The captain does
not care to speak of the part he took
IN the fight, being especially reticent
when 1t comes to that portion of the
work. But he will get a jolly welcome
from his many friends in this CITY.
when they meet him today. All Salt
Lake is glad to know he is here again.
Cure thau Cough with Shiloh's Cure.
The best Cough Cure. Relieves Group
promptly. One million bottles 9old last
year. 40 doses for % cts. Sold by
Nelden-J udSon and other druggists
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Conversation.

Boston Transcript: Hicks-Wheeler and
Brassey met for the first time yesterday
and they got on together famously. Iney
kept lp their talk until late in the eve
ming. 100
Hicks-Bicycles anr golf
Wicks-But Wheeler doesn't know the
first thing about golf.
Hicks-Neither does Grassy know any
thing about bicycling. Each kept it up on
his favorite topic without listening Ia the
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
President Faure,s Bath

President Faure of France is fond of
his bathtub. Recently matters of state
followed him, it is reported, even there.
A secretary entered, apologized no doubt.
and in any event stated that the minis,
ter OF foreign affairs had come regarding
something of great urgency which re-,
CURED his immediate attention. Cant
have any Deace?" the president. in his
evaporation, cried. Does he want to kill
me-in nv bath at that?" Then. with a
gesture infinitely resigned. the gesture of
a martyr, he added: Show him in-shoW
in Charlotte Corday"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Cute But Wrong.

Chicago Post: What do you under
stand by the department Of domestic
science?"
It's where they teach women how
to keep their husbands away from the
clubs"
OF course the answer was wrong, but
they all felt she ought to go to the head
of the class just the same.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
His EXPANSIVE Hart.

Chicago News: Clerk have been in
your employ row going on five years. and
l am getting the same salary | started
with.
PROPRIETOR know it, but every time
that I've made up my mind to cut you
down or discharge YOU sonnet hing has re-
minded ne Of Jour wife and little ones at
home, and so l just couldn't do It. There
my man, you see 1 have a heart as well
as head
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Setting the Style.

portrait of Admiral Diedrlchs, the Ger
man commander at Manila? He looks
just like the Prince of Wales"
Is that SO? Too bad he doesn't do as
the prince has done
''hoWs that2'
Why. you know. Albert Edward took
tumble the other day."
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
IN THE GARDEN.

Come into the garden, Maud.
For the wintry days have flown;
Come into the garden, Maud,
And see how things have grown
l have planted pansies and sweet peas
And morning -glories there
Come into the garden. Maud.
And see how my seedlings fare"
He took her little hand in his,
And they sauntered out to see,
But not a pansy had come up.
Nor solitary pea:
He took one look around, and then
He wildly tore mis- hair
His next-door neIghbor's chickens had
Preceded Maudie there.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
She Was Glad.

His big straw hat, with sloping brim,
made him look like giant mushroom
as he sat by the railway station on the
end of an empty tomato crate. playing
checkers, says the Washington Star. A
woman drove up in a spring wagon.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Working Fer Rest.

New York Weekly: Thompson-You look
pale and thin, Johnson. Why will you
persist in killing yourself working night
and day such weather as this?
Johnson am trying TO earn money
enough to pay the expense of week
rest in the country.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Einancieripp.

Washington Star: What's re. use o
botherin' me bout dat rent?'' inquired the
occupant of a dilipidated shanty De
groceryman wuz jes roun' hyuh an !
owes a Doctors bill an a hull lot o
yuther folks. An hyuh is down to my
last four dollahs.
:.Why don't you pay that on account
"Go'Way, man, l needs dat ter pay de
license foh dem two dogs.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Got Into Sunday School.

Town Topics: Sunday School Teacher
And Samson pushed asunder the pill
lars, causing the temple to collapse.
Johnny Uodate-But I'll bet it was
Sctley who really did The trick.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
That Was Enough.

Indianapolis Journal: She-Have you
heard Songs Without Words?"
He-Ive heard lot Of Inem without
music.
After that the incident and the piano
were closed.
No More Snakes.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Chicago Evening Post: 81 never
hear any more sea serpent stories from
your place." suggested the late arrival
at the summer resort.
Naturally replied the proprietor.
1--WE sell a better quality of liquor
now
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Just the Time.

Chicago Daily News: She-Oh, please
don't tease me TO sing, I'm so hoarse
tonight that 1 can hardly make a
sound.
He-Yes. know That's why 1 think
this would be a good time to have it
over with
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Punch: A Travellers Tale.-Mr. Bore
castIe-At last l came to the place where
1t was so steep that it would be hardly
safe even for donkey to go down-sO L
turned back.
Mrs Downshire Tall-Why?
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
The Retreat.

Indianapolis Journal: 'I see," said the
elderly boarder, that the paper says the
foe retreated doggedly. 1 wonder what
sort of retreat that was?"
presumably" said the Cheerful Idiot,
they took 20 their banks.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Not a. Calamity.

Chicago Tribune: THAT hailstorm was
the first salamity of the kind we have had
for several
"A calamity? My dear sir, you are talk
ing to a glazier-who hates English spar
rows"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Hadn't Heard It.

Chautauqua Assembly Herald: Higgins
Hall--Have you heard that empty box
story?
Rustic Bridge-No.
Higgins Habits just as well you
haven't, there's nothing IN i.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

turned in deep disgust, holding a dollar
in his hand and making trite observations
about his own mental condition. Now the
favorite query of his troop is:
Shot any thistle chucks lately, SER
geant?"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

There is one Christian minister for
every 900 of the population in Great Brit
ain; one in every ia, 600 in Japan: one in
l65,0S0 in India; one in 222 COO in Africa.
and one in $4,000 in the Chinese empire,
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
If He Needed It.

Detroit Free Press: He-If l should en-
brace YOU would you call for help?
Shelf you really thought you needed
u
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Street Car Renartee

A very fat man made his way
through the crowded car and decided
that the place next a very small boy
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
Have You Seen

the new fall Miller. Denney, Schoble,
Warburton and Halves derby hats?
Sole agents.
BROWN TERRY & WOODRUFF co.
166 Main street
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Tit-Bits: ny lord" said the prisoner
to the Judge. i should like to have my
case postponed. My lawyer is i'll and I'M
able to attend"
The judge took two or three minutes to
consider. THE case E.ay be postponed"
he said at last, If you desire it. But l
see here that you were taken in the act.
What can your counsel have to say on
your behalf2"
That's just what I want to know, my
lord said the prisoner.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Tit-Bits: The wife of a certain book
seller presented him with II S)ns, one af-
ter another. The good man carried his
professional spirit in family life, so he
named them "Primus," "Secundus."
concluded it was time to stop at the 11th
so he named him 'Finis." But it was
not fms. There was yet another to come
"a dat ghter this time-sO he called her
Errata."
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Chicago Record: when I asked for a
raise 1 told my employer 1 had grown
gray in his service.
What did he say?'
HE said if L had worked anywhere
else L probably would have got bald
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Puck: Yes. Ethel, he proposed and I
accepted him"
What. Gladys! Without consulting
papa and mammal"
Yes; I'm not going to have any board
of strategy running my affairs!'
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
FAREWELL ADDRESS
Delivered By Rev. F. L. Arnold Yes
terday Morning.
AFTER FORTY YEARS
DIRTY YEARS
HE RETIREs TO A WE'LL
EARNED REST.

Briefly Recaptitulates His Ministry
at the Westminster Presbyterian
Church-Severance of Strong Ties
Keenly Felt By Both Pastor and
Flock.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Washington Star. DO you think there
of our navy?" inquired one SDaniard.
Well" replied the other, after much
reflection, there's the ocean it used to
float in
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
IN THE BEST OF HUMoR.

Chicago News: A dog may not pose as
a star performer but when he travels
with a blind man he is always giving a
leading part.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
FLAGS.


By the Rev. Edgar w. Preble.
Trailing aloft from the towering stats,
Waving above the street;
Wooing the breeze with their crimson
bars,
Flashing the light of their silver stars
In the path of the marching feet.
Flags! Flags. Flagsi
Fleclling with color the houses arrow,
Cheering the store and mart.
Worn as a bow on the maiden's breast,
Rising and falling in East and West
Like the throbs of the Nations heart,
Flags! Flags. Flagsi
Coiled in the smoke of the battling fleets,
Flung from the masts on high.
Breathing defiance TO foes at sea,
Telling the world by their fictory
A story that can never die,
Flags! Flags! Flagsi
Draping the clay of the heroes asleep,
Canopies for the dead;
Symbols of hopes we never outgrow,
Blending the light of their stars below
With the light of the stars o'erhead,
Flags Flags Flagsi
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Tit-Bits: The Doctor-Queer saying
that about the truth lying at the bottom
of a well.
The Lawyer-You wouldn't think so if
you knew the amount of pumping we
lawyers sometimes have to do to get
at it.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Indianapolis Journal: Would you
not" asked the earnest woman, like to
occupy a high seat in the councils of
your country?"
Nav" said the fat man, as he adjust
ed himself to the hammock The end
seat in the summer car is good enough
for me-
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26
PATHos AND BATHos OF THE
FLAG.

Offence to Good Taste In Some of Its
Uses as Seen Now.
To the Editor of The Tri' une.
Sir: OF the many opinions on the sub
ject of the proper use of our flag which
you have published in your interesting
column, there is something in each one
which finds an echo in q loyal heart. I
lnclose you some lines, which l have cut
from the Universalist Leader, which
may not be inappropriate to the subject
as you have treated it. Truly yours.
AN AMERICAN.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

One day he met his Waterloo
II d maiden dressed in pink;
He asked her is she'd marry him;
She answered, Il don't think
Chicago News
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

There was a man in our town
Who posed as quite wit
And when a question he was asked
He always answered Nit
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Harper's Bazaar: Mrs. McLubberty
Cooking up from her newspaper)-Oi do
be r'adin' thot ut costs $500 a day to
run a battleship.
Mr. McLubberty-Wu av that's so, OF
am afeared av OF hod the runnin av a
battleship Ut wud how to walk afther the
first tin minutes.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

Cleveland Plain Dealer: at will be
necessary for you to state your age"
You'll have to eXouse me until l can
consult my mother
Don't you know your own age?'
'Ye-es. but I'm not quite sure about
mothers.''
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-26

He's got out his whitewash brush,
An tech up de sepulchre's stones;
He don't mean to fail eff de kalsomine pail
Can kiver de dead mems bones.
New York Times.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1898-06-17
TEACHERS TO GATHER.
Meeting of Trans-MississtppiE duca.
tors June 2s-3O in Omaha to BE
Notable in Scholastic Events,

Omaha, Neb., June 10. = Notable
among the educational conventions of
the year will be that of the TRANSMITS
sissippi teachers, to be held in this CITY
June %, 20 and 80. The scope of the
convention is quite large and several of
the famous educators of the country
Will be present and will make addresses
to the delegates.
The importance of Trans Mississip-
pi educational congress can scarcely
be oyerestimated. According to the
best calculations there are 126. 45o teach.
ers In the schools of the Trans Missis-
sippi states, directing the training of a
rapldly-rising generation of 3,sS4Os5
pupils In 10 states. The total valuation
OF school property in this territory ia
estimated at the time of the last cen
sus to be Sl46, 749,3o0, though it is safe
to say that the actual conditions at the
present time are much greater. In 10
OF the Trans-Mississippi states, with
out any regard for population there are
!lS universities and colleges. Illinois
heads the listwith % institutions whose
aggregate valuation of grounds, build
ings and other property is SO, 45s, 625.
Missouri is second, with rs; Iowa third.
with 20; Kansas fourth, with IA, Mime.
sofa, California and Nebraska in order
named. Nebraska's six college institu.
lions have property worth s1,114.0
There are 272,seO enrolled pupils in the
state, g. S7 schoolhouses and 8, 491 teach
ers. Over 1880 pupils are enrolled In
the Omaha schools and the value of the
property is 81 ,500,0 600.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1898-06-17
PREACHERS DEFEND BICYCLE.
EpiscopnIian Divines Don't Believe
the Use of the Wheel ON Sum
day Is Demoralizing.

The Louisville Ky.) convention of
Episcopal churches, at its session, en-
gagged in a discussion of Sunday OBJ
servance, and in connection Herewith
took up the practice of Sunday bicy-
cling. After several expressions against
it, Rev. George Grant Smith took issue
and advocated the bicycle. He thought
it did good work for those whose men
tai and physical condition was such as
to require a ride in order to obtain a
quiet respite from cares and worries
He did not think the majority of men
who ride the wheel on Sunday did SO
in order to go to saloon. DR.. Craik,
dean of Christ church cathedral, made
remarks in commentator of the wheel.
He referred to various expressions from
Louisville clergymen pro and con on
Sunday bicycling. He thought the con-
ditions of life in city were SO varied
that it was difficult problem to answer
for all alike. II have deep sympathy"
said he, "for the mechanic who works
all day during the week without any
hours for recreation, and it would be
hard to expect too much of him."