davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
In Madison's Gay Capital.

Up in Huntsville they are becoming very fastfdious. The ladies of that en- terprising town are to meet in the par lors of the Huntsville hotel tomorrow night to form a Village Improvement Society, with a big ", I. and s. A large number of ladies' says the Mer- curry, have become interested in the matter There are such societies around Boston, and in other centers of culture, and it now appears that Huntsville has caught the improvement fever dn its latest and most approved form.
 It is very safe ito say at the outset that the town COW and the town hog will not be seen in Huntsville after the new society is organized, and proceeds to business. There will be receptacles provided at street corners for odd bits of paper; the walks and benches in the parks will be renovated and improved; prizes will be offered for the best kept lawns, and for the best kept rear prem ises that abut on railroad lines; the condition of railway stations and land ings will be looked after; the sanitary condition of schools will be investigated, and first and last Huntsville is bn a fair way to become very stylish. If streets or sewers are neglected, the new society will want to know the reason why.
 Health and a pleasant aspect are what Ehe Village Society seeks, and must have. And it is astonishing how much society composed of ladies can accomplish in a town. Sometimes such a society needs funds. It Is then that a fete champetre or some other import ed form of entertainment is offered to the people, with scarcely the right to de- cline attendance, or the payment of ad- mission fees, and such other fees as the skill of the promoters can devise. Altogether Huntsville is about to be dedicated to beauty and refinement, and The Age-HeraId stands ready to congratulate the Queen City of the Ten n; ssee valley. There is nothing too good for Huntsville.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

with the men outside. One of them wanted to sell me mule which he had hung up on the fence, and I started in for dicker. After we had been talking for perhaps quarter of an hour, the smith asked me to stop inside and show him something about the work he was doing. As soon as he got me away from the crowd he came close and grew confidential.
 " ain't thinkin' of buyin' that critter' air you?" he asked in all sincerity.
 Well, don't know. I want mule, and that one looks all right" I said.
 ''You can't tell mule by his looks, mis- ter. Mules is for all the world like wo- men"
 ''Whats the matter with him?" l in- quired quite ignoring the comparison.
 'He ain't safe. Course I ain,t got noth- ing agin the mule nor the owner, and I'd be glad enough fer him to git the money fer him, fer he owes me fer the shoeing of him; but I don't like ter see a stranger tuck in an done up like he's trying ter do you"
 ''But you haven't told me what's the matter with the mule,' I insisted. will he kick?"
 'eThat's his weakness, mister" respond ed the smith, letting his voice fall to a whisper. "You won't believe me, p'rhaps, but I'm tellin you he's the kicki'nest crit ter in the mountains. He shore is, mis- ter, an I hope I may die right here, ef he can't kick the sody outen biscuit an never crack the crust. He kin, mister, or I'm brother to him."
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
'RASTUS STANCE.
Didn't Believe in the Supernatural, and Made It
 Lively for the Spirit.

From the Columbus Dispatch.
 'Rastus Johnson attended seance held by the Roottown Colored spiritualistic So- ciety, one evening not long since, and the next morning expressed himself as follows: "Br'er Jones dun tole me ter cum on hole a confab wifi de spirits We'll we dun go into da'ak room, brack as de debil an he say ter sit down. Lordy, how dem shib- bers chase cross me spare-ribs and ma very blood tux chill didn't know what was cumin'. Sufin wuz movin' round, but Br'er Jones sez 'twus sum hes libbin' frens.
 "'Wha I see dem spooks?' says l.
 You cain't see 'em, yo' jes heah 'em,' says he
 tus Johnson,' says it.
 Who is you = 'jaculated I.
 i" I'm de spirit ob Bud Noses
 "'Yous a iah, who ebber yo Is, kase Bud didn't go ter hebben. Tole ma suffin, sos I know fer suah.
 Chickens at Mars Butler's,' says de speaka.
 Don't brefulate, yo is him. I said, fo po' Bud was mascercated at dat coop
 ''Now, how'n Jaspa'd he get ter hebben Suah he didn't brib Saint Petah wifi no chickens, fo dey wuz lief behin'.
 'Wha yo all doin' up tha, Bud an how yo git up?' axed.
 "'Oh, I'm de do keepah fer nigger heb ben,' says he T am Saint Petah's po-tah You doan git up heah, yo rascal, Ions Ise de main guy
 "'Yo ain't so pow'ful,' says, 'an mo- ober yo ain't in hebben, eben eff yo voice do circ'late from de ceilin'.
 ''I wuz listnin' wid raptuah and nuthin' missed ma obsavathun. Somebody wuz in de room ovahead. jes pull ma gun, an shoot quick Suthin' holler an say: I'm ,o+,, tad xuh da 1iD1 wha' a predicament! Some fool nigger wuz hangin' half wa down trap do in de ceil- in an dem coon wuz libbid. Den jes pull ma razza an says: Make way eff you Tub yo' existence! an make ma 'scape.
 .'That DO coon wuz mos dead, but serve him right, he wuz so foolish. Theys lots ob cullid folks what b'lieves in spirits, but yo cain't fool his blackjack"
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
VERBAL BRlLLIANCIES.

In spite of the fact that George Meredith as an author Is so complicated many refuse to read him, he voices numerous clever thoughts throughout his books in the form of aphorisms. Here are few:
 Speech is the small change of silence.
 Observation is the most enduring of the pleasures of life.
 We women miss life only when we have never met the man to reverence. test of her nature.
 What a woman thinks of women Is the
 There is nothing the body suffers that the soul may not profit by.
 The future not being born, my friend, we will abstain from baptizing it.
 One may be as a weed of the sea while one's fate is being decided. To love is to be on the sea, out of sight of land.
 After 40 men have married their habits. and wives are only an item in the list, and not the most important.
 The hero of two women must die and be wept over in common before they can ap- precate one another That small motives are at the bottom of many illustrious actions is a moedrn dis- covery.
 Intellectual differences do not cause wounds, except when very unintellectuh sentiments are behind them. Whether a woman loves a man or not, he is her lover if he dares tell her he loves her, and is heard with attention. True poets and true women have the na- tive sense of the divineness of what the world deems gross material substance.
 The young who avoid the region of TO- nance escape the title of fool at the cost of celestial crown. Cynicism is intellectual dandyism without the coxcomb's feathers; and it seems to me that cynics are only happy in making | the world as barren to others as they have made it for themselves. | The true word spoken has its chance of somewhere alighting and striking root. Look not to that. Seeds perish in nature; | good men fail. Look to the truth in you, | and deliver it, with no after thought of | hope.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

geant who testified against the captain when called upon was reduced to the ranks and now a private has been discharged Tor the same reason. What are we building up in our army system? Is 1t to be spe- cies of prison life with the officers TOT keepers and the soldiers for prisoners Has it come to a pass where the pr1vate soldier must sacrafice his rights as Iree- man to satisfy the petty spite of his su- perior officer? If captains and majors and colonels and generals are to become des- pots over the men who are serving their country quite as well as they then It Is time that the army of the United States should either be abolished or subjected to mora humane rules.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
REFLECTIONS OF A BACHELOR.

It is only the innocent who are afraid in the dark.
 A woman never appreciates how lone- some she has been for some one to love her till she gets him.
 A specialist is a doctor who can always find that man has some form of par ticular disease if he examines him long enough.
 When a girl is in love with man she always tells him that it's funny, but she has always been considered so cold by the other men.
 A woman can never understand why the bugs will persist in crawling up on her plants from underneath when she washes the leaves so carefully on top
 As soon as a woman begins to say how much she would like to meet a certain lit erary man, her husband says pooh! she probably wouldn't like him bit if she did know him.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
THE OLD YEAR AND THE NEW.

By Father Ryan.
 How swift they go,
 Ltfe'5 many years,
 With their winds of woe
 And their storms of tears And the darkest of nights whose shadowy Are lit with the flashes of starries hopes. And their sunshiny days in whose calm heavens loom The clouds of the tempest, the shadows O0 the gloom
 Yea! men win cling,
 With a love to the last.
 And wildly fling
 Their ahms round the past! As the vine that clngs to the oak that As the ivy twines round the crumbled walls; For the dust of the past soma haarp Than the stars thaH flash out from fhA Let the New Year sfhg
 At the Old Years graYej 4, ., What 4,Is,,1s.. the Old Year gatsI "A And hds brow is mrehthed with manr [ But how many tnoqns do the foses co& ceal, Which aaod the ,ersss rSsss when withered. shah ' Yesl bright New Year, ;4. i
 Der all the earth, vi With song and cheer tt'
 They wdll hail thy birthj ., They wial love thy nace. they wdn lRud thy power; <s. For the New has charms which the Old has not,
 -s-s--sr--.-- "
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
Maryland, Texas and Tennessee.

The Ohio senatorial election is not the only pending senatorial election by any means. There is one in Maryland for Germans seat and the race is chiefly remarkable for its withdrawals. Postmaster General Gary first took himself out of it; then Gov. Lowndes declared he could not think of making the race, and even Congressman Mudd declined ito be considered a possibility. IA wealthy coal dealer, one Alexander Shaw, seems to have all the chances that Wealth generally affords in repub- 1ican circles, although Gov Lowndes and Senator Wellington and the admin istration at Washington are supporting ex-Congressman McComas, now a fed eral judge. The legislature is strongly republican and MT. Gor1nan's successor will be a republican.
 And over in Texas there is also a scramble. Senator Roger Q. Mills is convinced that he should be elected to succeed himself, but Gov. Culberson is inclined to think that dhere should be rotation in the senatorial office and that the notation in this case should strike the gubernatorial chair. A good democrat will be elected in any event.
 There is also the Tennessee vacancy the legislature having been convened in extra session. Directly after the death of Isham G. Harris, Gov. Taylor ap- pointed his former law partner, Judge Hurley, of Memphis ito the vacancy. Senator Hurley does not see why he should be busted, and if one read the West Tennessee papers, one will be apt to conclude that the senator will be his own successor. But if he read the pa.- pers of Middle Tennessee, he may con- clude that Benton McMillin, now serv- ing his tenth term in the house. will have a walkover for the senatorial seat. There wsll be hot time in Tennessee before this contest between two good democrats is ended.
 Some think Bob Taylor boom may spring up at any time, although nearly every member is pledged in one form or another to either Senator Hurley or scattering votes to create a deadlock, a Taylor boom may be started, and go on to victory. Whoever wins the seat Will stay in nffiea nntdi March 4. 1901.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
Total ...... ...s157, ,s5o, ,751 $2O2, ,215. .751

Total ..... ...$157, ,S50,7 ,751 $202, ,215. .751
 The deficit of the treasury at the end of the first half of the fiscal year is therefore $44,364,9 ,999, all payments on account of the Union Pacific railroad be ting excluded.
 The small surplus that December shows should not induce any one to think that the Dingley bill will hereaf large interest payments in December. These will occur again in January, when the deficit will be materially increased.
 It will be remembered that congress- was hastily summoned to provide suf- fcient revenue for the needs of the gov ernment. Nothing less would do. Nothing less would restore confidence, usher in prosperity and give business great upward lift. So the Dingley bill Wes iarumed through. Even the secre- rary of the treasury anticipates a de- f1ciency of s2S,OOOOOO on the first day of next July, and a deficiency of $21,- 000,000 one year later. Here are defi- ciencies covering two whole years un- der the bill that was to produce an ade- quate revenue at once. The adequate revenue from the bill goes to the swarming trusts and syndicates and monopolies that made up Hanna's cam pallgn fund, and not to the treasury.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
CURRENT FUN.

Property Ghosts Won't Go.-Tragedian- I won't perjure myself by going through that Richard III. ghost scene again.
 Manager-Perjue yourself! What do you mean?
 Tragedian-TIere I have to swear I've seen ghosts walking about me, when I know well enough the ghost hasn't walked since we left New York.-New York Even ing World.
 Not Just as He Meant.-"Johnson wants to borrow some money of me- Do you know anything about him?'
 "I know him as well as I do you. wouldn't let. him have a cent. "-Indian- apolis Journal.
 The Very. Cheapest.-Patience- is the cheapest looking thing you ever saw about bargain counter?
 Patrice-A husband waiting for his wife. -Yonkers Statesman.
 An Economical Parent.-Father (to son who is leaning over theater gallery railing) Take care, Johnny, and don't fall. It'll cost you shilling more in the pit-London Tit-Bits.
 A Mysterious Disappearance.-"Abra Lincoln, whar's dat cookey?"
 'I dunno. Uncle Nose said dar was a cake-walk yeste day abening, and maybe it haint got back yet."-Century.
 The Glory of It.-Large Delegation of La dies-Mr. Potts, we have come on behalf of the Charitable Cooking school. We wish to get all things at cost or below. If you refuse this, MT. Potts, we are in a position to make you regret it; but, dear MT. Potts, we feel sure you will oblige us, 1t is such a beautiful charity.
 MT. Potts (aside, sadly)-They get the halo and I pay for it.-Harlem Life.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
POINTED PARAGRAPHS.

From the Chicago News.
 Two heads of family are not better than one.
 The more innings a man has the better he enjoys his outings.
 A woman's blooming cheeks will not al- ways bear close inspection.
 Many sermons cease to be interesting when the dinner bell rings.
 All bicycle repair shops should mend puncturned tires at cut rates.
 It is better for a man to forgive an enemy than take a sound thrashing.
 You can't judge the size of mans brain by the amount of noise he makes.
 From the deposed oficeholder's stand- point public office means public thrust.
 Lots wife evidently passed some other woman and looked back to see what she had on.
 The dudes trousers roll up from the bot tom and the golf players stockings roll down from the top.
 When a woman begins to notice every act and word of man she has begun to either love or hate him.
 The more the average man sees of hu- man nature the more respectfully he re- moves his hat and bows to the mirror.
 When a mans trousers are out at the knees it's sometimes difficult to tell wheth- CT it's from praying or shooting craps.
 Before getting the appointment man seeks the office early and late, but after getting 1t he isn't in any hurry about get- ting around in the morning.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
TYRANNY IN THE ARMY.
The Conduct of Some Officers is Becoming
 Unbearabe.
From the Springfield Union.

From the Springfield Union.
 Uncle Sam had better turn his attention to the army and eliminate some of the snobbishness and exclusiveness that per- vades our military system. Army officers as a class are of the opinion that the earth was made for their exclusive use and woe to the soldier who crosses their path either in the line of duty or unthinkingly. It has reached a point now where superior officer in the United States army is like the king-he can do no harm and no matter what his sins, he must be forgiven. Only a few weeks ago the country was scandal ized from one end to the other by the trial of Capt Lowering, of Fort Sheridan, for brutality td a soldier in his command, but it was supposed that the incident was closed. However, 1t appears that the sore spot still exists. A day or two ago ser
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

were at loss what to do. Presently they met a countryman riding a COW.
 "Can you tell us how far 1t Is to Bar ton?' 'one of the party asked.
 The countryman looked to the right and left, as though seeking information from the palmettos and prickly pears. Wall, l reckon hits bout two whoops." he said, at length.
 1.-TWO what?"
 The countryman seemed to take this as challenging his veracity, for he once more looked questioningly at the palmettos and prickly pears.
 "P'raps hit may be some furder," he ad- mtted, refectively, but I low hit ain't more'n two whoops an holer."
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

All Tennersee is becoming very warm over the race as it stands. and no one can safely say more than that the new senator will be either Hurley, McMillin or Taylor.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
A CLUE.
From the New York Press.

From the New York Press.
 It seemed as if the victim of the accident should not be allowed to slip thus from life without a realization of the awful fu- ture.
 And can you look with composure," they asked him, 'upon the narrow confines of the grave?"
 The sick man spread his arms in de- lirium of joy. "The grave?' he repeated. "Think-think of all the room shall have!''
 It was apparent to those who stood around him that he was flat-dweller.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
SLOW, BUT SURE.

Doctor" said the young wife, 1T am un- easy about my husband; I'm sure he is working himself into an early grave. Can't you suggest something that will prevent his rapid decline?"
 "You might try getting him elected to the ce-presidency," replied the doctor; The would then have four years in which to gradually decline before sinking into the depths of oblivion"
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

The purchasing power of a dollar is greater today by two fold than it was sev- eral years ago. It will buy more of every thing known except gas. The people of Birmingham are yet paying $1.65 for less than a dollars worth of gas
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
EXPLAINED.

From the New York Press.
 The Literary Boarder-I just read story of the early career of Scrybell. the famous poet He had an inspiration one day, and, having no paper, jotted it down on the side of a public conveyance.
 The Idiot-Ah! That explains it
 The Literary Boarder-Explains what?
 The Idiot-I have heard that at one time he was a hack writer. From the Chicago News.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
IN THE BLUEGRASS REGION.

First Colonel-"Have you heard the news?"
 Second Colonel-"No; what is it?" First Colonel-"Our old friend Maj. Fuller has quit drinking"
 Second Colonel-"Do you mean 1t sho'?" First Colonel-"Yes. Positive fact" Second Colonel-"Deuced sorry to hear that When does the funeral take placer"
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
At the End of Six Months.

The Dingley tariff bill is still a de- ficiency tariff, although a small surplus appears in December. The figures of the first half of the fiscal year are given below:
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Should congress punch few holes in the civil service law it will only make it possible for Carl Schurz to deal in more oratory. This will be evil far more annoying to the public than civil service, with all it's viciousness.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

If Mark Hanna is as handy ct bribery as he has been in destroying labor organi- cations there is hardly doubt but he will be able to purchase his seat in the senate.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Gov. Bushnell might order out the militia to suppress the Mckinley agents camping at Columbus, doing missionary work for the real head of the machine.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
HE COULD KICK.
A Mule That Was a Past Master in the
 Art.
From the Washington Post.

At rare intervals along the moutnain roads of West Virginia and Kentucky the traveller may come upon blacksmith shop, but he is much safer in the shoeing of his horse if he will carry few nails and tools in the bottom of his buggy. On a trip by Pound Gap on one occasion I found a blacksmith shop at the forks of the road
 and, as usual, half dozen or more men sitting around it in the shade. My turn out needed some repairs, and, as the smith was pottering about it inside made talk
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
A BOOMING MARKET.

From the Charleston News and Courier.
 The Birmingham Age-Herald notes sad ly. but truly, that prosperity" appears to have struck the murder market last year, at any rate
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Bismarck's sore foot attracts more ate tention than does the movement of Ger many's squadron in Chinese waters.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

If it is to be a compromise on Calvin S. Brice it will be just as well to permit Mark Hanna to have the job.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

There are few happy days in the Klon- dyke country at this season of the year, though there may be many long nights.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Mark Hanna might try salt on those erring members of the legislature.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Richard Croker feels comforted in the belief that his crown is on straight.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Tt is well to observe that the pension looters are very much cast down at the turn things have taken in MT. Hanna's fortunes.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

It is noticed that Speaker Reed has no' sent his condolences to Columbus.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Everything falls in price but gas. The board of aldermen is expected to bring that to earth.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

The Commercial club took it all back that had been said about periodical tickets.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

an historical fact that some of the most eminent liars have died on the scaffold.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Durrant arrived at the end of the rope a little late. but he got there just the same.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Durrants earthly troubles are ended while Mark Hannats have just begun
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Durrant died protesting his innocence. This might mean a great deal were 1t not
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

MT. Hanna may find it easier to manage a legislature than to control grand jury
The age-herald., 1898-01-08
THE REAL ISSUE IN CHINA.

Mark Hanna might hire a substitute as he did in the early eos
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Mark Hanna is by no means in sympathy with the war that is being made on the bosses.
The age-herald., 1898-01-08

Remittances can be made by express, postoffice money order or drafts at curfe'e THE AGE-HERALD;
 Birmingham. Ala.