davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
PlTH AND POINT.

Satan can do much with happily
married couple. To repeat trite plati-
tude, "the deuce can't beat pair. -
Puck
Elderly Coquette (sentimentaIly)
Yes, my dear Mr.. Assessor, love is
eternal" Assessor frightenedl $50
/ perceive. "-Fliegende Batter.
Does my whistling disturb you?"
"Oh, not in the least. I'm used to hear
ing men whistle. I'm collector for a
millinery house. "-Tonkers Statesman.
Experience" said Uncle Eben, us
er good teacher; but education is
li'ble ter be wasted on er man dat dom
pend on muffin else. Washington
Star.
why do you remain at Yale, Tom /?
You are not doing anything there"
mo. but the family considers it lux
ury, and insists on my staying."-Har-
lem Life.
Marriage" said the Sentimental
Girl, SIS lottery" but the trouble
is" said the Pessimistic Bachelor,
that the man takes most of the
chances. indianapolis Journal.
Mrs. Jones-"I wonder what it is
that makes baby so wakeful?" Mr..
Jones (savagely)-"Why, its hered.
itary, of course! this is what comes
of your sitting up nights waiting for
me- PUCK
She (at the football game)-"My
brother says the Michigans have got
a lot of rooters here. What is a root
er?' He (his first appearance at a
game) Its that rubber thing the
players wear on their noses, I pre-
me."-Chicago Tribune.
-Caller-"You call this garden scene
June, but the leaves are all on the
ground, instead of on the trees
D'Auber-''They were on the trees,
but the picture got such a whitening
criticism from the committee that they
curled up and fell off''-Tit-Bits.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

the condensed steam This arrange
ment is very good for light work in
small quantity, \ large number Of
eight-quart cans may be more rapidly
treated by having long sink with
narrow draining board the whole
length of the back side provided with
row of steam jets the pipes of which eN-
tend upward a foot or So above the
board in order that the cans may be
placed above them and sterilized with
out danger of falling over while others
are being washed.
If large 40-quart cans are to be
handled prefer a small table as repre-
scented in Fig. .. II should be about -,
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Do not fatter yourself that a hair
from your head is fine and delicate
affair. In a needle factory one day a
hair was pierced by the apparatus used
for giving eyes to needles. Through
the eye thus made silk thread was
drawn and the whole placed beneath
the microscope That truthful, unf'at-
teIing instrument promptly showed the
hair. when compared with the silk, to
be like cable compared with picture
wire.-C Chicago News.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Put pain to sleep? St. Jacobs Oil does
This with Scjatica. Torment cured.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
A Difference in Insanity.
ooooooooooooooooooooooo

CONDUCTED By TIC assistant jaiicr.
| Hartley climbed the iron stairway
and walked down the ccmcuted cor
1Idor until he reached the door Of hi>
clients cell. Then. after look which
meant good afternoon" 70 The o1icjas
with thc big keys, h. drew mp the chair
which had been left for such purpose
in the corridor and spoke 30 the dark
space Of the cells interior \ low
laugh, mirthless and dry, came frori
the farthermost recess. and after a time
a man shambled ont into the borrowed.
bar-fltercd light which came etingt'E
from the world beyond the heavy walls.
"Wcu, Harry" said Hartley, I've
some Did YOU miss me
The man beyond the bars laughed
again and clappcd his hands togetHer
like one applaudiug The light which
now shune upon his face showed i a.
wearing Il Blank look The eyes wore
wide aud white and they ro'ed about
the walls and upper bars IF the cell Il"
vagrJnt way
I've been away for three weeks.
said Hartley. but I've been at work on
the case All the time The court issued
Il call for special panel this morning,
and they'll take it up Monday by the
fnrthest"
The prisoner laughed again cacl-
ling, cracking laugh that meant
seither JOY nor amusement.
Come nearer. Harry. Hartley COM
uauded u n low tore.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

according 10 The bulletin On The
sugar beet, issued by the United States
department Of agriculture. bcets do
best after wheat or some other cereal
4 good scheme Of rotation IS. fist
wheat, then beet>, then clover. one
crop of which is cut for hay and the
second crop piowcd under; then pota-
toes. wheat and beets in the order
mentioned BY this method. and ju-
d:cious use of stall manure and con-
mercial fertilizers, the fertility Of the
soil can be maintained and even in
CREASED.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

The Chicago Medical Missionary IranlnG
School, 1926 Wabash avenue, has been IS
tablished for the purpose Of preparing
Christian young men and women to labor
in city missionary and rescue work. ConSc-
Grated young people OF both sexes arc re
ceived as students without regard to creed
provided they are prepared to devote their
lives 10 Gospel philanthropjc work, The
instructors are physicians, trained medical
nurses and philanthropic workers who give
their services free; and students are. fur
nished with room and tuition free Of charge
and boarded on the European plan at cost
of from 81 to 81 % per week for meals. The
superintendent OF the school, who may be
addressed at 1926 Wabash ave. Chicago, Will
give all the information needed regarding
this purely non-sectarian, benevolent es
tahlshmenL IL. aims and work.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
Bcware Of ointments for Cntarrh
That Contain Mercury,

as mercury viii surely destroy the sense ot
smell and completely derange the whole sys-
TEN when entering it through the mucous
surfaces. Such articles should never be
used except on prescriptions from reputable
physicians, as the damage they will do is
citeu ten fold TO the good YOU can possibly
derive from them Halls Catarrh Cure,
manufactured by Il. j Cheney & Co. Toledo,
O.. contains no mercury, and is taken inter.
ualiy, acting directly upon the blood and
mucous surfaces OF the system. In buying
Halls Catarrh Cure be sure you get The gen
Toledo, ONO 10y f. j. Cheney < Go. Tcsti-
mouials free.
Sold by Druggists, price 15e per bottle,
Halls Family Pills are the best.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

the severity ot the disease or the prompt
and perfect cure performed by Dr. Ayers
Ptlls. Similar results occur III every case
where Dr. Ayers Pills arc used. They
helped me right away" is the common
expression OF those who have used them
Here Is another testimony TO the truth Of
this statement
II formerly suffered from indigestion
aud weakness Of the stomach, but since
began the use of DT. ]. G. Ayers Pills,
l have the appetite Of the farmers boy.
am A years OF age, and recommend all
who wish to be free from dyspepsia to
take one OF Dr. Ayers Pills after dinner
till their digestive organs arc in good
ofder."-WM. STEINEE, Grant, Neb.
Dr. Ayers Pills offer the surest aud
syiftest relief from constipation and all
its attendant ills. They cure dizziness,
nausea, heartburn, palpitation. bad breath,
coated tongue, nervousness. sleCpiessncss,
hiliousncss, and a score of other affections
that arc after all, only the signs Of a more
deep rooted disease. You can find more
information about Or. Ayers Pills, and the
diseases they have cured, in Ayers Cure
book, story OF cures told by the cured.
This book Of 100 pages is sent free, on
request, by the J. c. Aver Co, Lowell, Mass.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
slNoLENEsS OF PURPOSE.
why IL Is Necessary 10 Success in
ANYTHING.


A Young man. anxious TO become law.
yer. made application for a position in the
Office OF a baIrister, wheTeupon the follow.
ing unconventional dialogue cusued:
"Well, young man, and So you'd like to
be lawyer
"Yes, sir: think would like to be one -
Where's your gun, my boy | want 70
see your gun. my young gentleman. fond
OF sporting, eh!'
II have no gun, sin; don't know whether
Id like cunning,
@No gun We'll, YOU keep boat then?
Like boating"
q do not own boat sir: do not know
how to use one
''You wear a watch. or keep dog
Il am too poor TO wear watch, and J
have no dog"
You'll do, my lad. il YOU persevere in the
course you have begun. The law is teal
Gus mistress. and cannot be Won except by
undivided attention Remember this my
lad, and / viii insure Your success. You
may rely on any assistance | can render
YOU
The young man entered the office. aud in
time became a famous lawycr.-N. Q. Pica
}uuP.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

BY feeding poultry and stock with cooked
food during The winter months, at least one
third of the food is saved; also having stock
in healthy condition, preventing hog
cholera among your hogs, and insuring the
hens laying freely during the winter
months when eggs are always wanted at
high prices This Cooker win pay for itself
in one weck's time and is without doubt the
best aud cheapest on tie marI1et-just what
lis name implies, Farmers Handy Feed
Cocker. Upon application to the Empire
Manufacturing Co. Gl3 II St, Quincy, H.,
catalogue, giving a fuli description, may DC
obtained They are made in all sizes.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
NEW CITY POST OFFICE AT WASHINGTON. D c

avenue will be developed. One of thes,
days, maybe after the narrator has
ceased writing, and the reader has
ceased reading on this earth, Pcnusyl
vania avenue will be the most beautiful
thoroughfare in all the world; and
then only will be realized the dream OF
the wonderful civil engineer who
planned it so long, long ago.
SMITH d. FRY
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06


fet square. aud foot to IS inches IL
height, The top should be galvanized
iron. Have the outside the highest and
let it slope toward the center, where
the drip is located This had better be
connected with The sewer, or at Least
pass through the floor il you are so un-
fortunate as to have a board floor in
your wash room. Near the center is the
steam jet and the valve for operating il
should be located at a height in the
supply pipe TO suit the operator. This
steriIizing table is very convenient
for steaming out not only 40-quars
cans, but also large separator bowls
and even small churns and workers; III
fact anything movable in or about the
creamery Orange Judd Farmer.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
Destructive storms AIonG The coast

Reports Of maritime disasters along the
ego down to the sea in ships" should bear
in mind one thing in particular, namely
that il is highly desirable to take along 4
supply OF lIostetters Stomach Biltars as .
remedy for sea sickness Nausea, dysuepsie.
biiiouSue-~ cons, ypation, malaria, nervous
uess and lidney trouble. all succGmb TO It's
heneicent and sncedN action
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
Proof of IntcIIectu.Ii,,

as She an intellectual girl?" said
SpolSes to his friend Whiffet who had
been raving about his fancec
"InteIlectual?" replied Whiffet. II
should say she was. She pronounces
ceramics as though the word were
spelled with a 'k'."-Louisyillc Courier
T1urpai
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
FARM AND GARDEN.
STEAM IN THE DAIRY.
The Rest Method of Applying Heat 90
SteriIiXc Utensils.

The Hest Method of Applying Heat 90
steriIixc Utensils.
The best method of applying heat 10
sterilize dairy utensils is by means Of
steam. When conducted slowly into
large ovens or sterilizing rooms it fills
all requirements of bottle and glass
ware sterilizer and if some caution IS
observed to cool slowly very little
breakage need be expected. Tin and
woodenware may be treated in a sim
liar way, but the quicker method is to
place the can or vessel over a Jet Of
steam and allow ii to get the full bent
lit of its force for short time. Avery
convenient way to arrange this steam
Jet is shown in Fig. !. which represents
a steam jet introduced into the center
Of the draining board Of he wash sink.
The draining board should have mod
crate slant toward the sink 10 carry oil
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Squildig-The prohibitioHists ought
to feel highly encouraged
McSwilligeu-Why?
Because so much Of the country IS
going dry. "-Pittsburgh Chronicle
TELEGRAPH
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
AUDy Ahead.

Mabel-Tm getting new tooth in my
mouth.
Ruth-Oh. that's nothing. Ny papa's
a dentist and ! can have on the new
teeth want - Philadelphia North
American
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Somebody in Columbia, Ky, has
sent out and got printed in The west a
story that the Green river az that place
has been SO low lately that swine have
taken to walloving in ii and catching
and eating fish.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
IN oIdcn TiIucE

People overlooked the Importance Of rcr.
nancnuy beneficial effects and were salts.
fed with transient action; but now that 1t
IS generally known that Syrup OF Figs will
permanently overcome habitual constpa.
lion, wel-informed people will not buy
other laxatives, which act for time, but
finally injure the system. Buy the genuine,
made by the California Fig Syrup Co.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Il saw Midkiff and Mumaw yesterday.
ard both of them we're bowling drunk"
Yes: Midkiff was celebrating be-
cause he won a lot Of money on the
election and Mumaw got drunk because
he had Iost''-N. Y. World.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

He-Do you know think you are
most singular girl?
She (coolly)-I assure you II isn't
from choice.-Odds and Ends,
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
lie wns Accented.

Maiilda-Have you spoken to papa?
Bertie-Yes; l asked him through the
telephone. and he answered: Il don't
know who you are, but It's all right"
Pick Me Up.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Billy, keep your eye ON this small
boy of mine while run over TO the post
office minute"
Keep my eye on him! Graci, I'm
no revolving telescope. Detroit Free
Ireee
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06


others like
should
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
A TALK WITH MRS. PINKHAM
About the Cause of Anemia,

Everybody comes into this world with pre-.
disposition to disease of some particular tissue;
in other words, everybody has weak spot.
In ninety-nine cases out of hundred the
weak spot in women is somewhere in the utter
inc system. The uterine organs have less re-
sistancc to disease than the vital organs: that's
why they give out the soonest.
Not more than ono woman in n hundred
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

The ring Of the tyrant Caesar Eorgia
contained poison which he skilnuuy
cropped IN The wine Of anyone whom
he wished to put out of the way.--De-
truit Free Press
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Hogau-Oi wonder who will he th' last
man on airth2
Grogan-Oi dunno amy more than YOU.
But il is hoped that he'll lie an oondcrtaller,
50 he will know how to bury himself daceut
v-IudiauaUoliS Journal
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

\ sample OF WasteiuI and eAtraTa-
giant road work was lately noticed by
the government road commissioners
i'm Canadian town For IS years
broken stone and gravel had been
placed on one street until there is :.
depth OF from two to three feet of stone.
The money spent on it was sufficient to
pave all the streets in town with as
phalt. brick or other good material.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

OF all the keen-edSed Instruments
That are in battle swung,
The sharp 81 and most powerful
Is an angry woman's tongue.
Chicago News.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

The udder should receive prompt at
tenuon IN obstacle may be removed
from the tent he first hour that might
baffie science later
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Still he's generous TO a fault"
Pleads the kind. indulgent tone.
Comes tho grudginS answer: Eyes,
If the fault s his own"
Tt,Gon
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

hundredha perfectly healthy generation This points
to necessity helping the life
10 e O
of
in blood
turns to wa
II
i'm Why build
upon uplifting tonic, like E.P nkhams
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

What 1t Means Bobbe-"P oppa. what
does it mean by saying Wisdom crictb
without? Father Without being
heard my IN. Brooklyn Life
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

No man ever had as many suspcndors rs
he wanted arlington Dcmocrat
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

While asleep. cured soreness, stiffness
All right St Jacobs Oil did It.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

] cannot speak too highly OF Pisos Cure
for Consumption Frank Mobbs 20
VI. 22d ST.. New York, Oct. %. 1894.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

1t is always hard on a man when love or
the measles attacks him late in liic.-Chi
unn11 Nn1.-.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Eyeyone's fayorite adjective, which he
secretly enjoys when applied to himself, is
"pro4incnt Atchison Globe
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Sudden weather changes bring rheuma
tism St Jacobs OIL makes prompt cure.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Accounted What's all this Austri
an trouble about. anyway It's all over
a question Of national language" "Oh. ]
see, that accounts for the war of words -
Philadelphia North American.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

IIe-'Don't YOU think it rather risky to
come SO far alone on your wheel" She
Hadn't thought Of IL but ii YOU feel timid
I'll see you home y GLOW Book.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Pa what is the difference between 4
vioinist and a fiddler"
Pa-Anywhere from one to five thousand
year Boston Transcript.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06
SKILL OF DOCTORS TESTED.
Fifteen Years of Suffering.
IL thought | should surely die"

when thc stomach begins TO fail III
its duties, other organs speedily become
affected III sympathy, and life Is simply a
burden almost unbeatable. Indigestion
aud dyspepsia are 50 common that only
the sufferer from these diseases knows
the possibilities OF misery that iuhcrc in
them. q typical example Of the sufteriug-
of the victim Of indigestion is furnished
i'll the case OF John {. Pritchard. lie went
on for fifteen years, from bad to worse.
In spite OF doctors he grew constantly
weaker and thought he would die. lie
got we'll however, and thus relates his
experience:
For fifteen years was 4 great sufferer
from Indigestion i'll its worst forms. ]
tested the skill Of many doctors but grew
worse and worse until / became SO weak
I could not walk fifty yards without having
to sit down and rest. NV stomach, liver.
and heart became affected. and thought
would surely die ! tried Dr, J. G. Ayers
Pills and they helped me right away I
continued their use and am now entirely
we'll. ! don't know Of anything Mat viii
50 quickly relieve and cure the terrible
sufferings OF dyspepsia as d.. Ayers
Pills"-JoHS c. FRtrcHARp. Brodie, War
rem Co, ~ {.
This case is not extraordinary, either in
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Intuition-What some people claim To
have when they succeed in making a good
guess Chicago News
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

\ divorce suit should he included in the
wardrobe OF the actress who hopes to be
we'll adyertised.-C Chicago News
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

Unbdden guests give pleasure--whcn
they go.-Ram's Horn.
All kinds, little or big s.. Jacobs Odl
Surely cures aches and pains.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1898-01-06

When a man begins to move others he is
called "crank. Rams Horn
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1898-04-12
,1D FOR CUBA.


..,.-- ~ these facts and OF these con-
.,i-a~stions ask the Congress 10 author-
- ernnover the President 70 take
.--.,e,,ree n secure a full and nnal ternli-
-, ~ bostilities between the govern
,,,ont ~ spain and the people OF Cuua
ard ~ secure in the island the esIaoiiSi'-
mont of a stable government capdole ~
,,,.intain order and observing us in1erlld-
tional obligations. 'ensuring peace a, .'
,r,rouilitv and the security or us cur
zo,s MS well MS our own. ana 10 use .n1
,,,ititsrv and naval forces OF the uiii''"
ct.t., as may De necessary TOT inns pun =
IA d, The interest Of humanity anu
=, la ,r preserving the lives OF the sttrN-
',,,onie ~ the island. recommend that
,ho disfribution Of food and suppheS De
oa,+inued and that an appropriation De
ID ont of the public treasury 10 sup
riornant the charity Of our citizens.
THE ISSUE WITH CONGRESS.
Tho issue is row with Congress. II IS
q soieun responsibility. / nave eAheuse-
ed every EFFORT 20 relieve the l.toler 1ole
-@,d,tfon Of affairs which il at our doors.
I,,.l,,1-.d 10 execute every obligation I'M
I,nsfd uuon me by the constitution ana
The law / await your acton. =.
Yesterday. and since the preparation
~ The foregoing message. official mtor-
nation was received by me that the lat
csf decree of the Queen Regent or spain
ducts General Blanco. in order 10 pre-
,ars and facilitate peace TO proclaim
suspension Of hostiliues. the duration
and details Of which have not yet been
communicated 70 me. This fact with
every other pertinent consideration. VIII
am sure. have YOUR JUS ana caretul az
tsnrlon In the solemn deliberations upon
which YOU are about 70 enter
II this mea sure attains A successful re-
suit, then our aspirations as a Christian,
peace loving people Will De realized II u