The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1898-05-08

entirely the lovers fault. Nine times out
of ten the lover believes and declares that
the blame attaches to the woman. Be
this as il may, it is a rare thing to find
q young woman who changes lover into
a friend, or a married woman who has re-
tanned her girlhood admirers as her
friends. Perhaps this is a wise provision
of nature to insure peace OF mind TO nus
bands. or it may be that Benjamin Frank
lin was right when he said, After three
DAYS men grow weary of a wench' a guest,
and rainy weather"
A bachelor, a girl, and a young matron'
whose old beaux are now her best and
truest friends. had a discussion over this
problem not long ago, says the Chicago
Inter-Ocean.
Il never in my life saw person who
changed beaux as often as you do said
the matrou, facing the girl squarely. For
a few weeks you rush one set, and they
drop out one by one and are never heard
of-that is from you-again, and the next
thing your friends know you have another
dozen on the string. How is it? I con-
fess frankly 1 don't like the idea at all.
1t makes me conclude that you are some
thing of a flrt. Why don't you retain
these men as friends?'
The girl blushed and hesitated, and the
bachelor put in:
''Oh. that's hard thing for the aver
age woman to do. A woman must be
worldly wise indeed to convert a cater
pillar into butterfly. and then change the
butterfly back to a caterpillar again.
That's out of all reason with nature. ard
the woman who can defy nature, human
nature, / mean, is more witch than wo-
man. You ask this poor little girl why
she can't make all the men who fail in
love with her fall out of love with her,
and then become fond of her in friendly
way. Do you know what Balzac says
He says: Man may go from aversion to
love; but when he has begun by loving
and has reached aversion, he never returns
TO love. When this girl meets a man the
first thing he does is to fall in love with
her Some women have that faculty OF
compelling men to love them In lover
like way, and she is one of them. OF
course, she don't love them all, and when
she tells them so, one by one, their pride
is hurt even ifs their hearts aren't and
hurt pride breeds aversion in mankind.
Put this in your pipe and smoke 1t:
mans pride is more easily Scared than
his heart, for it is softer. This girl, or any
other for that matter, might spend the
best part Of her time trying to turn her
lovers into friends, and maybe she would
succeed with one out of a thousand; but
doubt it."
"Bosh!' exclaimed the matron. There's
something lacking in woman's makeup
If she can't retain her lovers as friends.
I've done it, and without any trouble
Perhaps they never were lovers, but
were always merely friends" suggested
the girl.
The very idea!' calculated the matron
contemptuously ITS a dreadful thing
to confess. but the other night my best
FRIENDSHIP was my girlhood chum-and
counted up the actual lovers we had had,
beginning with our first sweethearts. I'd
had seventy three and she almost as many,
and we've both retained them as friends.
Every one of those seventy-three men who
were once my sweethearts is now my very
good friend, except, of course, those who
have died or removed to other parts of
the world. How did l manage? There
wasn't any managing about it. was one
of those vivacious, flashing girls, and
about the first thing a man began to do
when we first met was to make love to
me. Nine out of ten began it all in fun,
but got in earnest. I'd let them say
what they pleased, and 1 did the same,
but / never put anything in black and
white, and I held myself above my
beaux That's the real secret of a wo-
mans power If she puts herself on a
pedestal and says to her admirers Hands
off, I'm above you, I'm out of your reach,
and you mustn't even stretch up after me,
for you'll only succeed in hurting your
SELF they'll worship her. Respect will
form the basis of their alteration, and
then she can make friends of all that are
worth having as such. No one knows
woman so well as a man who has ceased
TO be in love with her and man reads wo-
man of this type and says to himself:
This is a woman worthy to be the friend
of my mother or my sister. / can't afford
TO let her pass out of my life, and he
doesn't"
Il think it would be very vain kind of
woman who would set herself up over her
men friends in that way" observed the
girl.
Not at ALL" answered the matron but
she is a very self-respecting woman, a
genuine thoroughbred. Did you ever try
mounting a pedestal? Try It, If all wo-
men made a habit of this, there wouldn't
be any misguided or lost ones wandering
GROUND. Really it's the only way TO COM
nand the respect of mankind. Men esti-
mate US not by what we really are, but
by our own estimate of ourselves. / we
hold ourselves apart from them as some
thing too pure to be touched by an inn
pure deed, or word, or thought even, they
will regard us in that light, and soon,
dearie. we grow to be what we have as
sumed we are. That was a wise man who
said: Assume virtue If you have it not
There's no hypocrisy in doing that. It's
eievating. 1 tell you. Force men TO ideal
ize you and you'll find it easy to live up
to their highest ideal of you.
I'm thinking over my married women
friends who have not kept their old flames
as friends. ! find that they are the y-o-
men who. as girls, We're too yielding to
men, They let their hearts run away with
their heads; they sucked the orange too
quickly. and then there was nothing to
do but to throw away the rind. They sot
down on a level with their admirers. in
stead of looking down on them. I'm not
saying anything against a girl with his
disposition, mind you, for as a rule she
is the most magnetic, lovable of creatures.
She is capable of an unending variety Of
social conduct; she is a creature of fasci-
mating moods; she hatters for the mere
pleasure of INDUCING her generosity: she