The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1898-08-18

ads of such stores are batting out of
their turn.
Xxx
"Boys," said the old man, "take my
advice and lead honest and upright
lives, for if you should ever be convict
ed of larceny, great consideration will
be taken by the judge of your previous
record"
Xxx
If was only sure that free lunch
would be introduced into Cuba and
Porto Rico along with the other Amer
lean institutions it would greatly sim
plify my future plans.
Blanco is worrying about that, too.
TX
A young man fell onto the Chicago
river the other day and received severe
Commissions. He also swallowed a.
mouthful of it, but by the use of the
Roentgen process it was located and
successfully removed.
~
In West Virginia there is we'll
which discharges gas with such force
that it can be heard six miles, says an
exchange. That's nothing. In Ne
braska there is a gas we'll which can
be heard all over the country.
~
1t is considered high treason to say
~ told you so" in Spain.
Xxx
We don't care about the Philippines
and we are willing to let Cuba be free
and to let the Spanish take their guns
and things along, but this we insist on
--Blanco must surrender that type.
writer.
Xxx
1t is becoming clear that the Chinese
empire will be second Poland. The
only question is, who are going to par
ticipate in the division?
Xxx
Our friend in Watertown urgently
requests an explanation of strike
in this column two weeks ago. A dia-
gram in four colors will be forwarded
on receipt of the necessary revenue
stamps.
~
An inquirer wants to know the diff
ference between profession and
trade. That is hard one. A man
with trade makes bargain for the
price of his work, while professional
man takes all he can get. That is prob
ably the reason thieves, lawyers and
beggars are counted among profess
SiOnal men.
*
The law of Minnesota provide that
men serving sentences in county jails
shall not be given pastry or other
delicacies except on Sundays. 1t is
we'll that this law exists, for else the
prisoners in Ramsey county Jail would
surely have their digestive apparatus
hopelessly ruined by pie.
*
Grover Cleveland has gone into the
poultry business. He intends to devote
himself exclusively to improving the
breed of Democratic campaign roosters.
The broods of these birds turned out
the last few years have had too few tail
feathers to suit Grover.
*
The moon gets full twice this month
for the first time in fifteen years. 1
mention this merely to call the atten-
ton of the New Y ork Voice to the en-
croachments OF the rum-devil.
*
In spite of the good times Saltwater
merchants are still able to handle all
business offered. It is only in case of
fire that any St. Paul department is
called on.
There are $50 prisoners in the pen at
Honolulu. They are employed as SER
wants in families of the city. Every
evening at o'clock the warden of the
prison goes out on the front porch and
rings bell, upon which the prisoners
Immediately rush from their work to
be shut up for the night. Then the
doors are locked and stragglers are
locked out. Just think of it, locked
out!
~
Has anyone heard about any propo-
sition for cessation of hostilities be-
tween the partisans of Mr.. Schley and
those of Mr.. Sampson? A protocol
is in order.
**x