The times. [volume] (Washington [D.C.]) 1897-1901, 1898-08-23
SKETCHES FROM TIE STREET

& Athos Portions and Aramis were in
town yesterday. They wore Second Army
Corps emblems and. having been de-
prived of opportunity TO fight the Span
iards they were very willing to fight
anything that happened In their path
They called at many warehouses where
in tales. wines, liquors and cigars might
be purchased and, like Falstaff, they
were blessed with unquenchable thirsts,
which produced "uneonquerable vaior-
But try as they might, no civilian had
aught but smiles and soft answers Tor
boys who wore the blue, and the three
bayoneteers were unable to crafty their
bloodthirsty desires.
They bumped into tough-looking citi-
zens and then inquired why in Paradise
the wise individual didn't dig some OF the
dirt out of his blessed eyes, but all 10
no avail. They called barkeepers names
which were gorgeous in their proiathty'
and they went out of their way to make
/, themselves Objectionable to everyone they
happened to see 1t was no go, however,
so they Iurched out of the thirty-hfth
saloon with the determination OF disgust
in their eyes
/ Lets catch some d-n Niger an XIII
| him. auoth Athos
Lets kill two d-n niggers,' spake
Porthos.
Better t. kill three d-n niggers," sug-
gested Aramis.
Therefore they swung down PennsyiVan-
| la Avenue with their searchlights pruned
for anything black.
| 1t was nearly noon. The heat was m
tense. They stood at the corner ana
guarded every approach
There's onei' said Althos pointing TO
| a figure away down the street. The hs-
ure was limping. and limping slowly at
| that, but the three bayoneteers marveled
not at the speed, so long as the enemy
] approached.
/ Fix tsayonassr quoth Aramis. ST
| the rear Right for'ard tours right
! Haiti Prepare t receive charge
| d-n Higgers."
The three waited and still the enemy
| approached. Nearer and nearer drew the
| foe and still were the three prepared TO
| receive his charge.
| At last he reached the opposite curb
and the three saw tina. he was a soldier
4
ed painfully with the aid of a cane, and
a snow v',its bandage was tied beneath
his hat. He was black, but the color of
his skin only served 70 make the band
age the more prominent
The three managed TO take in these
details after a little trouble with the
sidewalk which several times attempted
| TO rise up and strike them. They with
drew their imaginary bayonets from the
| defensive attitude staring a
! tie enemy, who was beside them by this
time
| Porthos advanced and after graveIy
| looking the enemy over inquired:
| Amt y uigger?'
/ Yes, si-,''
/ SOLDIER"
! Yes si=i'
| Cit shot?"
I YES SIR
| "Cmon have a drink
1 The last heard from the three was an
earnest declaration that any who
| called their new addition a Niger would
| have something horrible happen to him.
| and when they disappeared into saloon
| door the four Were arm in arm.
It's funny just how quick man can
| win worldwide renowH. The unknown
man today tomorrow simply owns the
town. Just walk along the street and
/ keep your both eyes open wide. and you'll
find that being famous is as bad as sui
! eide
The girls want Hobson kisses, nothing
| else will suit their taste: If the habys not
| named Dewey, why the mother fees dis
| graced. The children wear SchIey blouses.
| though they're anything but big, and the
/ pig that amt named Blanco is a mighty
| friendless pig.
You read Drink Sigsbee Whiskey''
Roosevelt beer won't make you full"
Eat Sampson oats for breakfast and
you'll have a Sampson pull use Ore
gen spring water, it will shake up man
| or beast" Just try Cervera smokers
they won't hurt you in the least Our
| Fftz-Lee tires won't puucture, put them
on and there they'll stay. With our
anti-Shafter ear drums you can hear a
mile away Children Cry for Weyler
syrup, for it wouldn't hurt a thing"
Amt Merritt full of merit. is the latest
song to sing"
And SO it goes and who can tell where
this wild rush will end, for heroes here
are forced to wish they didn't have a
friend But advertising pays. of course.
when prefixed by name. so let "Agui-
naldo bitters' have a front seat at the
game