Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1898-04-07
Hoods SarsapariIIa
ErENJNU ECHOks.

30 tney " nov somethln u open II wild,
Judge.
us your baby intelligenty" "In.
telligent! Why. IL she wasn't she'd
mover bc able 10 understand the Lam
guRgp my wife talks TO her. -" Black
anu White.
Held like TO sea that 10 inch gun
which is being made for the defence
of Now York hRrbor. She--SO should
]. | had DO idea any OF those guns
were SO short. Truth.
Beware of the man who smiles when
hos angry; bs'R dangerous. And bs-
ware also Of the man who looks glum
when hos glad he's probably
humorist. Chicago News.
When a girl falls in love with a man
she didn't inland to fall in love with,
she generally finIs she has fallen In
luvo with a man who did intend she
should fall in love with him. New
York PIess.
Pompous and Wealthy Distiller to
his partuer)--I say. Worts, what name
shall | give TO my new mansion
Stanley Hall" or "Darnley HALF"
Worts Call it alcohol. W. London
Graphic.
How q your brother, Tommyr' an
in bed. miss; he's hurt himself. =
How did be do that7" "We were
playing at who could lean farihest out
OF a railway carriage window and he
won. - lid Bits.
Smith never argue with Crank
leigh any more" Jones--"Why not?"
Smith because I'm always sorry for
him when hv doesn't agree with me.
and when he does I'm sorry for my
self. Chicago News.
Mike-How old are you, Pat? Pat
Thirty sivin next mont. Mike-Yez
must he Older than that. When were yez
born? Pat--In 1861. Mike-I have yez
| now. Sure. ye2 told mo the same date
tin years ago It'd Bite
1 believe" said Uncls Ebeu, "dat
| lie human race would be constable
wiser an happier ef you could git EN-
TO foller an Argument as easy aH you
kin git EN- to foller a circus puhces-
sion. "--Washington Star.
''Tell me. Harold, oh, tell mo-" aha
said, as she pinned the flavor on ths
lapel OF his evening cont, elf there
should BIO war would you go?'' Yes
he answered, ~ think would - to
Europe. "-Waahingtnn Star.
lie knew what they always saw. 40 he
thou hit he would forestalI her. ~
suppusa you've nsyer been kissed by a
man BEFORE bio said "Do Look "a
homely as all that's" she demandel.
haughtily. Chicago Evening Post.
"Wfl u | have to he identified when
cums here next time?'' inquired MIR.
Jagway. No, sir. replied the bank
cashier Not unless you swear off in
the meantime. should know that nose
among a million. '--Chicago Tribune.
Miss Oldcash ulia, dear, I'm going
to give such a novel birthday party.
l'vo invited guest for every year of
my life. Won't it he Just lovely? Miss
Passee--Yes; but where will you find
room for them all?-London Graphic.
Hell love you, Miss Peach, ar
IDENTITY, pasaionately, madly. She-Non.
sense. Mr.. De Sever; you are hardly ac-
quainted with me. lIe--I know, but
then-why, perhaps that's the reason,
don't you know. - Boston Transcript
| Mrs. Peck" Henry, want you ia
tell me the truth. Have you ever re.
gretted that you married me?" Mr.,
pecH with unwonted epunk l-"I never
have. There's no chance for me to do
1t. You married me. "--.Cnicago News.
III de average young man. SAID
Uncle Eben, "ud be willin' ter % froo
as much hardship ter git useful kuoEl-
| edge H5 he did leRrnin' ter smoke his
fust cigar, dar wouldn't DO nigh az
many regrets in dishere life. Wash
ington Star.
Our Representative, save tho
Fiunkville Buglc, whose editor did not
get the postotlice, has been in Com
gress a year or thereabouts and the
only measure he has ever opsned his
mouth about, is a pint. n.-.Indiana-
| polls Journal
Here, hold on there, hoys! What
are you chasing that child fur?" "Ile's
Spanish eYnperfizer, that's why."
Spanish sympathizer? What do you
mean by that?" Ills ma washes him
via castillo soap--come on, Kids n'--
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
SuHpicious-"Of COURSE" said the
mild hammered man to the farmer, "if
you insist that those eggs | bought laet
fiom you were new laid, there is nothing
more to be said m that point. But are
you aure that tine hen hasn't taken IN
the rage for the antique?' '--Intlianap
liz journal.
Hostess (at partyl--And does your
mother allow you to have two pjeces of
pie when you are at home, Willie?
Willie who has asked for a second
piece mo, ma'am. Hostess We'll, do
you think she would like you to have
two pieces here? Willie confidently
oh, she wouldn't care. This isn't
her pie. lid, Bits.
Restful Rogers bringing subur-
oanite's doorbell OF | a. IN. l-'Scuse
me, pard-but me aud Weary Willy and
Dusty Rhodes and Frosty Fagin is
a-tryin' ter sleep 10 your barn, and
wouldn't yer be kind enough ter cholo-
rof1rm dat kid, or put him under a tub,
or 40 suthin' to i'm ter mako i'm stop
yeilin' 80 Internal loud?--J Judge.
he-l wonder what the meaning Of
tnat picture is? The youth and the
maiden are In tender attitude. She
I'm, don'tyou see? He has Just asked
nef 10 marry him, and she is accounting
nIm. How sweet! What does the
artist call the picture? lie docking
about oh. ! ses! It's written on a
Date. ''''"' oP''o
miss Cayenne had caused her mariner
great deal of annoyance by forgetting
what her long suit was and remaining
ooIiPious TO trump signals. He moppei
lne perspitation from his brow and
.entured ths observation 81 was under
me Impression that you said you we're
accustomed to playing whist {" Z" Yes. 4"
sne anSwered, sweetly, ~ play it.
Ton I work at it, as. some people do. -,
Washington Star.