The times., 1898-05-22
.Pastime Stories.

Thomas Nelson Page has gathered to-
gether a volume of ''Pastime Stories"
stories of high life and low life. Bohemian
revels and functions most select. all
brief. all pointed, and most of them cap
italy told. Some of these tales have ap-
peared in Harper's Drawer. and some in
the various illustrated magazines which
deal with the short story in all its forms
The dedication. ''To All Good Story
Tellers." is most appropriate, for many
Of these stories are just such bits of
Misunderstanding. anecdote and Incl
dent as are told where good story-telIers
meet. One of the best is the first, a char
acter-sketch entitled How Jimmy Eased
Her Mind" The principal characters are
the negro janitor of an Office building and
his wife who one day knocked him sense
less with a flatiron, and caused an inva-
sion Of the police. The speech which the
husband made when the jury returned a
verdict OF guilty" and condemned the
prisoner 70 the peHitcntiary for two years
is one of the most unique things in dia-
lect. He said:
well, gent'mens, jes' wants to say Che
paused. and took in the entire courtroom in the
sweep Of his glance Il ies wants to say dat
don't think you ought 20 do jimmy dat-a-way.
l'all ain got nuttin' Z all 'g'nst jimmy
She ain do nuttin to you all-nuttin' I all She's
my wife, an what she done she done to me. Ef
sho' Now. hits disa-way. Y'all is married gent
mems, an yo' know ies' how I Is. Yo' knows
sometimes 'ooman gifts de debil in her 'Tain't
her fault: tbs de debifs. Hit ies like wolf in
COWS. done know jimmy ever sence she
WIZ little gal at home In de country / done
know how mean she is. / done know all dat
and done marry her, 'cuZ she suit me ] had
plenty O urr gals I could "a marry but | ain
want dem / want jimmy, an ! poster her till
she had me Well, she meaner chen n / think
she Is; but dat amt nuttin; | satisfied wild her
an dat's 'nough. Yall don know how mean
she is. She mean as 8 narrer-faced mule She
kick an she fight an she quo1 tell sometimes
hardly ken stay in muh house: but dat aim nut
tin. stay dyah an when she git thoo right
dyah same as befo' an ] know den | gyvine have
good supper, an ain got to poster my mine
about nuttin'. Y'all done been all long dyah
'cuZ yah is married gent mems. Well, dat's de
way 'twuz turr right. jimmy been good so long
/ feared she got some'n de matter wild her. and
! kind O. git oneasy, an sort o. poke her up.
But she amt; she all right ! so glad to find
her dat way, sort o uppish, an when she hit
me j slapped her. / didn' mean 10 hut her;
/ Jes' hit her little tap side her head, SO, an
she went all TO pieces in a minute. / done hurt
her feelins. Y'sll knows how it's yo self Vim
mems got mighty cu'ious feelins; ain like chill
lern's nor mems. Ell you slap 'eTn, dey goes
got TO ease dee mine. Well. Jimmy she got
mighty big mine, an when she dat-a-Way it
tccks night smart TO ease ito smoove IL. Fust
she done try broom, den cheer, den shovel den
skillet; but ain none O. dem able to case her,
an den She got 10 try de fat-iron She got to
do II. l'all knows how It's Ef winners got
70 do anything dey got to do 1t. an dat's al
Flat-iron don't hurt none. ain eben feel IT,
Hit just knock me out muh head little while an
/ ies good as / wuz befo When | come TO |
fine dee done rest jimmy. OATS what hut me-
Jimmy done Leen easin' her mine all desc yeahs
an we ain nuver had no trouble befo'. An
now vail say she got TO 10 de penitentil'y
How'd y'all like Eomcbody TO sen 1o' wife 10
penitenilay when she es ,asin Ter zine?
Ok 20 dat How She swile ease he- mine dyahe
ak You dat. ! know vail Esina sen her
dyah, cnt'mens Cuz you d1nc say rou is !
know you IS an ain got nuttin' to saw bout
1t, not wudi but all | AK you is to le' me 60
dyah, too. don want stay here bdout jimmy
an y'all ain gwine know how to manage her
b'dout me. is de onliest one kin do dat Jimmy
got six chllern-little chillern-dis las crap;
she didn' hab none some seyrul wears an den
she had six g,vine bring em ali right up hyah
10 y'Rll TO teck keer on, 'cuz | gwine wild her
-ef you le me. | kyarn stan il dyah by myse'f
leetle mo- went 'stracted last night. Y'all kin
have EN-, 'cuz y'all ken teck keer on 'em, an l
Lgan't. would jes' like you 10 let her go home
fer leetle while 10 yo' SEN her up les would
like dat. She got right new baby dyah, squeal
in for her dis minute an / mighty feared hit
gWine to die widout her, an dat'll be right hard
pom jimmy. She ain never los but dyah one,
an had right smart trouble wild her bout dat
She sort o out her head arter dat some seyrul
months, till she got straight again git long
toler'ble well wild de urr chillerns, but I ain
able 10 nuss dat new one, an she squeal all
night. l got CONAN to come dyah an look
arter ii, but she say she want jimmy, an ] think
jimmy want her-I think she do. Jes' let her 20
dyah little while. OATS all want to ak you"
It IS interesting to note at the end of
the story that the jury Gil married men.
found the prisoner guilty of only easing
her mind.
zone from Four" and "Billington's VAL
entine" are bits OF society portraiture,
somewhat In the nature of conundrums.
In each of these stories the reader is left
to construct the denouement to suit him
self. somewhat on the pattern of THE
Lady or the T1gerY' There are two or
three mule stories. three or four stories