davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
DIRECTORIES FOR HEIREssEs.
The Curious Volume That Has Been
Complied for the Use OF Eligible
! French bachelors.

Nowadays when a young French
bachelor. grows tired of single blessed
ness and decides TO become a benedict
he goes about selecting a wife in the
most businessSii manner. In the alb
stract monsieuf is gallantry itself. but
marriage is with him serious affair.
Therefore as soon as he concludes TO
take unto himself aKwife he consults the
heiress directory, a hook which has just
been published in. Paris. He argues
thus: Does not a haAker, before lend
ing money, make due Inquiry as 10 the
wouldSbe borrowers stsnding? How
much more should I be careful before
investing my future hapeiness?" ?" In
the useful and important yelume men
toned above is 10 be foundSa full lis;
of tue girls OF all classes in Elence who
have money in their own 'sxpecta-
.tions,'' and there are addAd the
amounts supposed to be commanded by
them, their age and a short description
of their personal looks, figures sand
other characteristics. Doubtless this
directory has been found useful and
requisite, because in France marriage
are arranged in most cases upon strict
~ business lines and are a matter for
the relations of the "happy couple
rather than for those "unlucky" peo-
pie themselves. At any rate the book is
having good sale, so its publishers are
well satisfied. Speaking of this direc-
tory recalls that it is not quite novel
idea, since in some parts of Italy. espe-
cially Genoa, there have been for some
years men and women called marriage
brokers" who make a speciality (and a
good living) of bringing young people
together with view to their finding
life partners. In this way they are
very successful and publish regularly
list of the "eligibles" of both sexes in
order to facilitate matters for their
clients. Very large commissions are
often paid by those who are thus intro
duced to each other if marriage fol-
lows, as it frequently does.
In England such directories of heir
esses are not entirely unknown, though
not published for general sale as in the
instances above quoted. Only while
giving the amount of the income OF
each heiress-more or less correct, gen
orally the latter-these lists have not
descended to the minute particulars
which are to be found in the French d.
rectory. On receipt of a stipulated
sum, however, the person sending the
list promises to forward more details.
-Chicapo Chronicle
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
NUMBER 27.
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.


More than 100 Mandatory poems have
been sent to Lord Kitchener since his
return to England
Prot. kitridge. of Harvard, is said to
be the only maa living who can read
Eliot's Indian Bible.
Cornelius Vanderbilt, Jr. recently
had his finger crushed while coupling
ears on the New York Central railroad,
on which he has been employed as a me-
chanical engineer.
Lord Leicester has II 1.0O0sswans upon
his estate at Abbotsburg. q charming
little village few miles from Wey-
mouth, England. The cost Of caring
for the swans averages over $1o. 900 per
year.
Most of my boyhodd," says +.
Marion Crawford. was spent under a
French goyerness. From her learned,
in her language. geography and arith-
metie, so that now / write French as
easily as English.
Princess Theresa of Bavaria is a sci,
entific writer of considerable merit.
She has already published one book on
South America, and is now at work on
another, to get materials for which
she made a journey Of exploration IN
the widest parts of Brazil.
That there is aftersall some sort OF
'.honor among thieves" is shown by
fecent communication to a leading pa.
per of Palermo, Sicily. Candino, a noted
brigand, writes thai one Galbo, a no
tortous member of his band, has been
expelled for s'discourteous and unman-
perlysconduct in his dealings with the
publicg'
The journal Officiel lately contained
in list'cf pensions granted to widows
of French officers the name of Berthe
Amelie Bertineourt, widow of the late
Col. Henry, who committed suicide in
prison after having confessed that the
Dreyfus borde5Pau was forgery. She
gets 1867 franSs a year, or about 1893.
Martegazza has written a Utopian
romance, in which he expresses the
opinion that in the year 1000 all coun-
tries of the worldwill form one fedora
ton, the United States of the World,
and there will be but one government
with only four miristries-of agricul-
ture, hygiene, education and com.
merCe,
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
/ HM
CUTTING PRICES
TO SUIT THE TINES.

/ will sell Staple Goods for Cash
paid on the delivery of goods at dis
count OF 20 per cent. and other goods
at discount of from 20 per cent. to
30 per cent. from Regular Prices All
Who have money to buy their supplies
with will do we'll to call on me and
examine my Goods and learn my Prices
before buying.
My Stock of Goods consist of Staple
Dry Goods, Ready-Made Clothing for
Men. Youths and Boys; Hats and Caps;
Boots and Shoes for Men, Women and
Children; Furnishing Goods. consisting
of Underclothes, Work Shirts, and
Dress Shirts, in great variety; Collars,
Cuffs, Neckties, Scarfs. Suspenders,
Hose. Half-Hose, Gloves, Mits and
aandkefehiefs, 10 great variety. Fine
Hair OH Perfumery, Toilet Soaps,
Staple Drsgs and Patent Medicines.
Seeond- -Hat1 Books. School Books,
Blank Books Paper, Envelopes, Tab
lets. Box Papsr, Ink, Pen Stocks, Pen
Points. and alk kinds of School Sup
plies. Watcher. Clocks. Spectacies in
great variety. hazors. Razor Strops,
Homes. Pocket Knives, Pocket Books,
Purses, Ladies' Bays. Satchels, Photo
graph and Autograph Albums, and an
immense stock of Laces. Ribbons and
Fancy Notions. too Numerous to mem
tiou. HENRS BARNHoUsE.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
IRONTON. MO-. THURSDAY. DECEMBER % 1893.
SWEARING OFF STORIES.
Promises Are Seldom Kept by Eithev
of the Parties to the
Compact.

Speaking of swearing off, said
narrow chested, dark complexioned
Iyoungsfellow.to group of his cronies
swore off smoking. That was when /
was young and did not know myself. 1
swore off with friend, and the penalty
was a suit of clothes to cost $50. The
condition was that we were not 10
smoke in town. When travelling or
hunting or fishing-out of town, in fact
we would be allowed to smoke. The
scheme worked we'll for some timess
then began to want 10 smoke. l bats
tied with desire for several weeks, each
day of the period becoming a harder
trial than the preceding. At last, when
the longing became too great, [ went to
see my partner in misery to tell him
that we had better call the contract off,
as I could not stand it. He was not at
home. He had gone out of town week
before and would be absent another
week. Then I broke down. The
thought of the party of the second part
smoking himself blue in the face while
l suffered was unbearahle. So, with the
fine of $50 staring me in the face, l
bought cigar. and smoked it. 1t was
worth $50, thought. But did. not die
for lamb only; 1 smoked vast guam
tity of cigars before he came home.
Then I went to him and told him to go
order the suit, that 1 had broken the
contract. He smiled quietly, as it to
himself, and then said: All right, old
fellow, but do not be disturbed about
the suit. kept the contract just three
days"
Another man said: There were two
men in this town who swore off, the
breaker of the contract to pay the other
ten dollar hat. Finally one of them
weakened, saying to himself he did not
mind giving ten dollars for smoke.
While he meditated over the matter,
however, he thought out scheme to
save himself on the hat. He went to the
hatter's and bought a ten dollar hat and
had it charged to the other fellow.
Then he called on the other fellow, and,
pointing to the hat, said: See that
hat, old boy? 1t is one I have just had
charged to you on that swear-oH con-
tract The other fellow cried out:
How in the dickens did you find out
1 had been smoking?' Never mind
said the other. a little bird told me-
Pittsburgh Times.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
CHURCHES:

CATHOLIC CHURCH, Arcadia College
and Pilot Knob. L. WERNERT Rector.
High Mass and Sermon at Arcadia College
avery sunday at O'Clock a. VI. Vespers and
Benediction.of the Blessed sacrament at !
o'clock p. ~. High Mass and Sermon and
Benedictionat Pilot Knob Catholic Church
at 1880 O'Clock A. NJ. sunday School for
children at 1870 O'Clock P. NJ.
NJ Z. CHURCH, Cor. Reynolds and
3 Mountain Streets, G. ID. DANNER, Pastor.
y Services Ist Sunday eaon mouth, Granite
willie, 1916 a. m; lrontOn, 1880 p. m. I'd
SUNDAY each m ,nth, Iron son, lO:45 a. IN. !;
GrauiLeSiile, 1880 p. m. Sd Sunday of ca n
mont4, Grauiteviile, 10:45 II. M; Ironton,
7:30 D. m. 4th- Sunday lch month, Gran
ireYiile, 10:45 q. IN. aud 1880 p. m lst and
I'd SundsYs each N iuth, iron Mountain, .
d. an. Prayer service eyer Week, Granite
vile, Wedn ssday evening, $3.50 p. m Iron-
toa, Thursday evening. 1880 =. m. Epworth
League, Granitegille every Sunday, evening,
80 %. M. cordial Invitation to all.
"a NJ. E. CHURoH, SOUTH, Fort Hill,
between Tronton and Arcadia. Rev. L.
n. AsPLEY, Pastor. services every Sunday,
Sat IL A. NJ. and 1880 P. NJ. Prayer meeting
Wednesday evening, 1880 O'Clock. Sab
bath school at 3 80 A. M. Ladies' All So
sesety, Thurs lay, p. NJ. Ladies' Prayer
Meet ng, Friday, . P. NJ. Juvenile Mission
. arg Society at Par ,Daage, Saturdat, 2:3O P.
n, Choir Practice at Church, Friday, 1880
M All are cordially invited TO attend
these services.
BAPTIST CHURCH, Madison street,
near Knob ST., Rev. GEORGE STEEL, Pastor
s Residence Ironton. Preaching on every
5 saturday before the first Sunday OF each
month at $3.50 p. n. and every sunday at IL
A. NJ. and Z p. NJ. Sunday School every
sunday at $40 A. NJ. and Prayer Meeting
avery "Wednesday evening at $3.50 p. M.
Presby terian Church, cor. Reynolds
and Knob streets, Irontou. services at II A.
M. ani I:30 p. ~ Suliag Senool at $3.50 A.
NJ. Z. p. s. C. l., $3.50 P. NJ. Prayer Meet
& pg Wednesday, P. NJ.
ST. PAUL's CHURCH, Episcopal, 1routon.
Rev. A. BRITAIN. Pastor. Services Sunday
II A. n. aud Pm. Also ! P. NJ. "Wednesday.
Sunday SchooI every Sunday, at $3.50 A. NJ.
LUTHERAN CHURCH, Pilot Knob.
Rev. j. @. FRITZ, Pastor.
NJ. e. CHURCH, Corner Shepherd
and Washington streets, Ironton. ID. A.
sHENLEY. pastor. Preaching every sun
,iay at II 4. NJ. and 1880 P. NJ. Sunday
Schoo oil st $3.50 A. NJ. and Select Reading al
p NJ Literary every Tuesday night at 8.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
Two POINTED odestlons Answersd.

What is the use OF making better
rticle than youe competitor If you
can not get better price for itp
Ans.-As there is no dtfference in
The price the public will buy only the
better, so that while our profits may
De smaller on a single sale they will
be much greater in the aggregate.
How can you get the public to know
your make is the best?
Ii both articles are brought promi-
nently before The public both are cer-
ain TO be tried and the public will
very quickly pass judgment On them
and use only the better one.
This explains the large alr oa Cham
oerlain's Cough Remedy. The people
nave been using it for years aud have
iound that it can always be depended
upon. They may occasionally takeu up
With some fashionable novelty pni forth
with exaggerated claims, hui are GER
tain to return TO the one remedy that
they know to be reliable, and for
coughs. colds and Group there is noth-
ing equal to Chamberlain's Cough
Remedy, For sale by Geo. G Jacobs,
Druggist.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
THEY SAW THE GAME.
One of the Four Young Rooters Got
Excited and the other
One Got Mad.

It was on the free grand stand at the
big intercollegiate football match.
They were young, pretty and vivacious,
wearing huge yellow chrysanthemums.
They chattered necessarily betwee n
plays, but left no doubt as TO their
fealty, for they screamed their applause
for the varsity boys of Michigan. no
matter which side was gaining tenn
porary advantage. But just as par
ticularly brilliant end play was being
made there was an unexpected out
break.
Floss" exclaimed one of them, why
didn't you tell me that my hat was on
one ear?" and she screamed the inquiry,
because her voice was pitched in that
key.
"Never mind your hat! Who cares for
d hat? Tear 'em upl Tear 'em up!
Hurrah! Whee! See i'm go! Michigan
Michi-O, there, he's down. They had
no business to slap him down in the
mud like that. They can't play any
how" and only the broad shoulders of
man IN front prevented her topping
ever as she tried to wave the yellow
umbrella.
''Do behave, Floss. You mustn't get
SO excited. Now tell me before you do
another thing, is my hat on straight?' ?''
''I'll fix it. Lean on this-Rah! Rahi
Rah! W-h-e-e-ee! Wasn't that a beau
tiful kick? And that Illinois fellow
didn't carry it back three feet; not two
feet. Hip, hip, tear 'em up!"
During this brief moment of ecstacy
the hat was made to look as though i:
had been in the rush line, for the fair
enthusiast had been yanking away at it
to vent her excitement. 1t was now
over one eye instead of one ear, and
was woefully dishevelled. A laughing
ntatron at hand made the best of the
wrecked millinery, but the owner
couldn't see any sport in football from
that time on.-Detroit Free Press.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
ALMOST HOME.
The Sad and impressive Ceremony OF
a Soldiers Bsrial
at Sea.

When war is done and the great ships
turn their prows toward home, laden
with the true heroes of nation, 1t is
then that gladness comesA into the
hearts of those at home whose loved
ones are returning; but manAa heart is
heavy with woe, for their idYed ones
have fallen in a foreign land where
they fought under the banneF of the
Cross, and in the records of oSr hon.
ored dead many soldier willy have
"Buried at sea" after his name.
There was hardly single transport
that made its homeward voyage THAT
did not experience the sad rites over
the body of some poor soldier who had
started for home full of hope, ard some
of the ships buried many in the deep.
A burial at sea is not so terrible as one
on land, where the body is placed in the
ground, for somehow the restless wa
ters seem to forever mourn in ceaseless
motion.
When everything is IN readiness the
great engines cease their throbbing and
the officers and men gather on the aft
er deck to do the last honor to brave
man. Comrades carry the body, tha!
has been wrapped in his blankets and
sewed in sail-eioth, to the tilting-board,
where it is draped in the folds of the
flag for which he gave his life. Around
the deck are grouped his comrades and
mess-mates, who stand reverentially
attentive to these last honors, and
scarcely a sound breaks the Stiffness
except the splashing of the waves
against the ships sides as she tosses
easily on the seas. An occasional or
der seems to be strangely out of place
and every one treads lightly and speaks
softly, in subdued voice. as though fear
irg to awaken their comrade from his
final sleep. The chaplain reads the
service and offers his prayer, which in
cludes the living with the dead; a
prayer for the rest of the soul that has
flown from a noble body, and prayer
for those who have still few hours be-
fore they, too, go to join the great ma
jority-S prayer of sorrow and OF
thanksgiving.
The trumpeter plays the slow, mourn
ful notes of ''taps," that tell of the last
Sights OUT and as the final long, clear
note dies out, and is lost across the wa
ter, the board is slowly raised ard the
body gently slips into the sea, its eter-
nal resting place, and over the eddying
waters the fring-squad thunder the
last three volleys. Then the great
wheels again commence their grind and
send the ship toward home.-Leslie's
Weekly.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29

Or unusual interest 10 every reader
OF this paper is the ad dsertisement else.
where in this issue OF the St. Louis
Globe Democrat. unquestionably one Of
the greatest American newspapers.
That peerless paper can now be had by
mail, every day, including the big
Sunday issue. for only six dollars per
year, and. at that price, it is certainly
within the reach OF all who desire to
read ANY daily paper. The Weekly
Globe Democrat is issued IN sewi-weekly
sections of eight pages each, making ii
practically q LARGE SEMI-WEEKLY.
aud almost equal to the average daily,
at ONE DOLLAR A YEAR. This issue
is just THE THING for the farmer,
merchant or professional man who has
not the time totread daily paper, but
wishes TO keep promptly and thorough
ly posted. 1t is madeup with especial
reference to the wants Of every mem
Der of the family, not only giving ALL
THE NEWS, but also great variety,
of interesting and instructive readiHg
matter of all kinds. Write for free
sample COPIES TO Globe Printing Co.,
st. Louis, Mo.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
To Raraaiu Younr.

Take brisk walk every day; secure
fresh air, glimpse of fresh scenes and
fresh faces. These are worth more
than doctors tonics to toanovertired and
nervous man or woman, and give pref
tier glow to the cheeks than the finest
manufactured rouge in existence. One
who keeps mind and body on the alert
will seldom need to have recourse to
science or diet to decrease size and
weight If you have thin face, and
the flesh seems unwilling to become
plump and round in response to mas
sage, build up the system by taking a
half pint or more of sweet cream every
day. eat of cereals which have been
cooked for several hours, raw egg
beaten up in milk once a day, warm
drinks of milk diluted with hot water,
and baked sweet apples or ripe, sweet
fruit at each meal.-Cincinnat En-
atiirer.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
THE FLAGS OF TRUCE.
They Amused and Exasperated Our
Men in the Trenches Before
Santiago.

The days that followed July were
filled with innumerable visits to the
Spanish lines under flags of truce. To
the men in the pits, who knew nothing
of the exigencies of diplomacy, these
virgin flags were as offensive as those
of red are to the bull. The men had
placed their own flags along the en-
tire line of trenches; and, though they
afforded the enemy perfect target and
fixed our position as clearly as buoys
mark out race course, the men wanted
the flags there, and felt better at See
ing them there, and so there they re-
mained. The trenches formed a horse.
shoe curve five miles in length, and
the entire line was deiantly decorated
with our flags. When they futtered
in the wind at full length and the sur
kissed their colors, they made one of
the most inspiring and beautiful pic.
lures of the war. The men would
crouch for hours in these pits with
these flags rustling above them, and
felt well repaid for their service; but
when they saw crawling across the
valley below the long white flag OF
truce, their watchfulness seemed
wasted, their vigilance became farce,
and they Knocked and scoffed at the
white flag bitterly. These flags We're
sent in SO frequently that the men com.
pared them to the different war extras
of daily paper, and would ask: HAS
that ten o'clock edition gone in yet?'
and, sis this the baseball edition com.
ing out row, or is it an extry?"
One of the regulars said to me in
great perplexity: II can't make out
this flag of truce gag. It reminds me
of two kids in a street fight, stopping
at every punch to ask the other fellow
if he's had enough. Why don't we keeI
at it until somebody gets hurted?'
One of the cowboys of the rough
riders expressed the same idea in pro-
fessional phraseology: "Now that we
got those Mexicans corralled, he said
s'why don't we brand them ?"-Richard
Harding Davis, in Scribner's.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
Title of "sir', for Frenchmen.

The decoration of French officers
with the Royal Victorian Order, in re-
turn for the various grades of the Le-
gion of Honor conferred on the duke of
Ccnnaught and his staff at the French
maneuvers, has revived the question of
whether Frenchmen who are English
knights should call themselves .Sir.' .
Before the institution of the new order
there had been no British knighIhoods
conferred en- Frenchmen since the
Crmean war, the last survivors having
been Marshals MacAkahon and Canrob
ert. who were G. C.. B.'s, and Gen. De
Mel.inef, who was *. C. B. 1t would be
quite in accordance with tradition for
French subjects in the service of the
republic to use foreign titles Due
dc Bsaccia, when ambassador N Lon.
don, spcrted a new Neapoiitan tie,
though be was heir TO an old French
duixedom: and princes of the Holy
Roman empire, Papal counts and Aus.
tran barons abound IN French official
lists. The difficulty that Gen. de
Negrisr, G. G. II. o., and M. Crozier, *
v o.. have In calling themselves ST,
Louis de Negrier and Sir Philippe Gro.
zier is that the title ..Sir does not exist
in French, ard ChavaIier does nnt corre-
spond to London Word.
job Work Of all kinds at this office.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
The snider,a Apnefffe.

The spider has tremendous appe,
tite and his gourmandizing defies ali
human competition scientist who
carefully noted a spiders consumption
of food in "a hours concluded that il the
spider were built proportionately to the
human scale he would eatat daybreak
(approximately) a small alligator; by
seven a. m, a lamb; By nine q, M,
young canelopard;' by one o'clock, =
sheep, and would finish up with lark
pie in which there were 10 birds. Yet.
In spite of his enormous appetite, a
spider has wonderful power of refrain.
ing from food, and one has been known
to live for ten months when absolutely
deprived OF food. A beetle lived in a
similar state Of unrefreshment for three
years.--St.. Louis Globe4Democrat
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
sIewesl Beef ( La Mode.

Takesthe desired quantity of round
beef. cut into three-ounce pieces, and
dreage with -four. Fry in the stew pan
some beef drippings and sliced onion.
Put<sft the meat and fry well, stirring g
cenSsantIy ten minutes. Then add
gradually enough water to cover the
meat. season with salt. pepper, tea
spoonful each allspice. clfsve 5 and mace,
bay leaf an a q sliced Isrlon Let 1t
simmer gently zsoas neinnati
Enauirer.
5oh-work of all kinds Sc this oIice.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
oFEIeIAL DIR EcToRY OF IRON COUNTY
sCOURTS:

~ a u
CIRCUIT. COURT is held on the
Fourth Monday in April and October.
- EOUNPY COURT convenes on the
First Monday of March, June, September
and December.
PRoBAPE COURT is held on the I'd
Monday in February, May, August and No
Tember.
OFFICERS:
q. W. FARRaR. JR, Representative.
r. L. Carly, Presiding Judge county
s ". ALcoRN, county Judge. Southern
a. G. MoYER, county Judge, Western
Dlsi irict.
w. Il. EDGAR, Prosecuting Attorney.
w. I'll. FISHER, collector.
w. A. .FLErCaER, County Clerk.
ARTHUR HUFF, circuit Clerk.
HAsRy ii. BUFoRD. Probate Judge.
p. ". WHfTWoRTH, Treasurer.
". T. 0'NEAL, Sheriff.
G. .G3HENDERSoN, Assessor.
G. W.sFARRAR, SR., coroner.
j. VI. HAWKINS, School commissioner.
CITY OFFICERS:
Magor, W. X. Edgar.
Ntsy'Shdl. j. I. Marshall.
CITY Attorney,
Citg Clerk, Arthur Huff.
Citg Treasurer, Mann Rngo.
Collector, W. fl. Fisher.
City CouncitneR-G. W. Marshall, w.
Gay. c. a. B1ckeS, w. J. Scuwab, Geo.
ID. Harks and Henrs Kendall.
Street GoBamittee-H my Kendall, w. T.
Gay aud G.. w. Marshall.
Fire CoHsnt.tt8e-G. ". Marshall, w. j..
Schwab and q. A. Buckley.
Health Consnaittee-G. d. Marks and g..
A. BucAeJ.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
weak Eyes are Made Strong,

dim vaSaon made clear, styes removed
aasa 6ulated lids or sore eyes Of any
kind speedily and effectually cured By
the use ol alheriand s Eagle Eya Saive.
It's put up IL tubes. and solde0n s
guarantee by all good druggists.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
Coughed % ssars.

/ suffered for 25 years Nth cough,
and spent hundreds OF dpllars with
doctors and for medicine IA 20 avail
until / used DR.. Bells Pine Tyr Honey.
This remedy makes weak luuAs strong.
1t has saved my life.-J. b. Rosell,
|Grantsburg, Ill.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29
Official Directory.
MEMBER OF CoyGREss


Hos. Epw. RoBB, Thirteenth District,
g Perfyvules No.
II. s. LAND OFFICE - GEORGE STERL,
Register; g. 5. RUSSELL, Receiver from
on, No.,
j. FKtSK GREEN, Judge Twenty First
Circuit. De Soto, Mo.
Iron County register., 1898-12-29

DR.. Cady's Condition. Powders, are
just what horse needs when In bad
condition. Tonic. blood purifier and
vermifuge. They are not food but
medicine and the best 10 use to put q
horse in prime condition. Price %
cents per package. For sale by Geo.
G. Jacobs. Druggist.
AS Imperialism comes in. American
ism goes out.