Santa Fe new Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1898-1951, 1898-03-21

rs you keGTG the NeIDS3"
than I believed that every man who did
not was a coward. But I have come to
look at things differently. Where's the
use trying to steer against the current
when it is so much easier to drift with
it?
II have stood under pretty hot fire
tonight, Mamie. Your guns were heavl-
ly shotted, and before you came l had
been trying to convince my brother that
this was no concern of ours.
II have been trying to convince my.
self that l was not needed on either
side-I, such a miserable failure, al
ready forgotten by the world. | could
not fight for slavery. l did not want to
fight against the men who owned slaves.
But you have said things tonight that
have made me long to court a bullet
hole or saber thrust as a pleasant relief
II may not be worthy to stand side
by side with the professor. my dear,
but at least | shall no longer skulk in
the chimney corner My duty in this
matter has not been quite clear, my
path not we'll defined. You will have
the credit of having armed two combat
ants-your father and your lover"
All the scorn was gone out of her
face, leaving it white and sad. She lift
ed startled eyes to him, where he stoo'
close to her chair. Stern resolution was
written in every line Of his worn face.
II don't think l quite understand
you, Strong"
"Nor"
DO you mean to say that you are go.
ing to do something that your conscience
does not approve Of simply because you
think | want you to do til"
Evidently she did not understand
him. He would not enlighten her. Poor
little one, he would not by one feathers
weight add to her sorrows or her anx.
ieties. He smiled wistfully down into
her upturned face and answered evasive-
~:
"Conscience generally does get worst
ed in a hand to hand combat with love,
don't you think? l simply mean that I
am going to do battle for my principlea
l am going out to take my chances Of
being shot at along with countless bet
ter men, perhaps a few worse ones.
She leaned back YEARLY in her big
chair and closed her eyes. Tears were
providing hot and fast under their lids.
II don't know what " say or what
to unsay 1t seems so wicked for you to
keep all your strength and health and
vigorous young manhood shut away
from the world in this way--but. Strong.
Strong
She stood up swiftly and stretched
both hands toward him with the look
Of q terrified child in her eye.
"Mamiei My dearl What is it?"
If anything should happen to your"
"You will respect me-dear.
If anything should happen to you
I would be your murderer. And the
world-oh, Strong. the world would be
90 horribly empty"
He held her in his arms q moment,
Just long enough to press his lips eve
emily upon her shining hair. That was
all. Then o stood back, holding her
small trembling hands in a tight clasp.
II had not meant to say anything to
you until l could look you and the pro-
lessor squarely in the face. Everything in
the future is yelled by a black cloud Of
uncertainty. We will bide our time, my
sweet, and I will grow strong, knowing
that you believe in me.
She swayed, closed her eyes, chung to
him for q brief second Of childlike
abandonment, and then asserted her Gus.
tomary self possession with q pathetic
little smile.
II have grown 20 absurdly weak all
Of 1 sudden. II must be because ! am
% tired. We Won't talk any more TO-
might. Good night, Strong. Than, a
4 n concession e the pleading " his