The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1898-12-15


of heavy ribbons. From the descrip-
tion this young lady gives of the head
gear of the ladies of that period, 1
would judge that their heads resembled
load of hay built by person who
didn't understand the business. 1t was
the style for the fashionable society
ladies to bedeck their faces with what
they called party patches. They were
divided into hostile factions. The diff
ferent factions would attend the opera
with their faces all smeared over
with plasters. They were bitter ene-
mics and would claw and spit at each
other like lot of Killkinny cats.
Now L can remember when the
women of this present nineteenth cent
ury adorned their faces with a patch.
What this patch meant, or what it
represented | never learned-in fact
never went to the trouble of finding
out [ have also seen men with black
patches Oh their eyes. l understand
the meaning of those kinds of patches.
There is nothing artificial about them.
They are the genuine article. 1t was a
very serious matter in those days for a
person to meet a member of the nobil-
ity if he failed to remove his hat and
acknowledge the fact by various other
facial and bodily gymnastics.
suppose the foreigner who contem-
plated a trip to London and wished to
insure himself against arrest went in
to active training under the guidance
OF some professional contortiOnist five
or six months previous to the time he
set sail. In the text book of our stud
les we read OF one Peter Plumb, a mer-
chant of London who was indicted by
the Honorable Mr.. Thomas Gules, of
Guile Hall, in the county of Salop. for
that the said Peter Plumb did in Lom-
bard street, London, between the hours
of two and three IN the afternoon meet
the said Mr.. Gules, and after short
salutation put on his hat, valued five
pence, while the Hon. Mr.. Gules stood
bare headed for the space of two Sec
onds. 1t was further urged against the
criminal that during his discourse
with the prosecutor he feloniously stole
the wall of him having clapped his
back against it in such manner that
it was impossible for Mr.. Gules to re-
cover it again at his taking leave of
him. [ have heard OF men stealing
houses and cellars, and of forcing their
way into vacant lot and grab an arm
ful of post-hOles and escape. But Mr..
Plumb was the first person l ever
heard of stealing wall. The trial pro-
ceeds and the plaintiff Mr.. Gules takes
the witness stand and testifies that he
was the Cadet of very ancient family,
and that according to the principles of
all the younger brothers of the said
family he never sullied himself with
any business. He continues his testi-
mOny and swears that he would rather
starve to death like a man of honor
than perform any manual labor
and bring disgrace on himself and
family. Mr.. Gules produces witnesses
who cOrroborate every word he swore
to and, they didn't perjure themselves
either.
The defendant Mr.. Plumb takes the
stand and casts many reflections on
the character of the plaintiff such as
bum, free lunch fiend, and thief. He
produces some witnesses but his case
was hopeless, and he was duly con-
victed. This case in many respects was
similar to brace game of faro. Mr..
Gules was the man who caught the
lambs and steered them up against the
judicial fleeing machine. The jury
was the professional cappers, while the
bailiff kept cases. The prosecuting at
torney done the dealing. His honor
with deck of strippers up the sleeve
of his purple robe was perched up high
on the lookout chair. The defendant
was the sucker. Now I have always
harbored and cherished the thought
that the blue blood of bumocracy
courses through my own veins, and
when l read the testimony of the
plaintiff Mr.. Gules, my claims to noble