New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1898-07-10
A WAR PRlM Err.

A WAR PRIMER.
A. FOR AiPhonso the hoy boy Kin nY Of Spain;
G is for Cuba the tyrant-oppressed;
d is FOR Dewey. with victory blessed:
+ FOR for F F4snt w most ad NOT Of
9 IS for Gomez. fierce in the fray.
Il is for Hobson our hero today ..
J Is for Jlngoes all firing OF words:
X for TIE knsdSom th IN, y thre1'ens 70 'a:
NJ is FOR Maine. remembered. indeed
Is 70, for 6 Nsyy f ss,,e. tAS ezra grand
is :or Phippnss the far;conGIeiTed h snd
IS Tor tor EisSieoas and ,ustaed wars.
Is FOR sampson. an Admiral he.
is Tne$ San; ~ho r sS ,hs I big sh how
/. i FOR X eTxes. OF war ri methods eth Old
is for Yeow-take rumors OF war.
rs for the Zeal OF our hip. hin hurrah'
-(Cincnnau Post.
A Chinese essayist thus describes the American
people: They live months without eating mouth
ful OF rice: they eat bullocks and sheep In enor-
nous quantities. they have TO battle frequently;
the men dress all alike. and. 20 judge from their
appearance. they are all coolies neither are they
ever 10 be carrying a Fan or an umbrella. for
they manifest their ignorant contempt OF these
insignia o. a gentleman by leaving them entirely TO
women: none OF them have fnger-nas more than
an eighth OF an inch long: they eat meat with
knives and prongs; they never enjoy themselves
by sitting quietly on their ancestors graves out
jump around and Kick balls II paid 20 do II. and
they have no dignity. for they may be found walk
Ing with women.
An amusing incident occurred in an a. r. & c:
car on the afternoon OF the Fourth. Four young
seated on one siie ~ the car having decidedly
good time. While their merriment was at IT'S height
a seyen-yelr-old boy across The aisle suddenly
leaned forward.
Say. mister. he called to one of the young men,
why don't you kiss your girl?"
The young looked UP in surprise and the
'Talmage Tamage." said the boys father. what
do YOU mean by such talk"
TS Gy G 9s at % h yd !" Srs'd he ss sfsd
You told me you'd DO It II YOU was him
terestins until the young people left the car
cleveland Plain Dealer.
West Bath. Me. farmer never has his horses
shod. He SAYS that the practice is Hgairs, nature
AMI brings his horses up from colthood TO travel
on their hoots. They never seem 10 have any dif-
hculty In getting over the roads even In slippery
weather
This is the biz from your oculiss." said the col
Just take IT back and tell him that ! can't read
1, with those glasses he sold me."-tDetrot Free
1T was n pouring wet December Saturday night
In barracks" says writer in The Nineteenth
Century" "and a late after-ordcr had been issued
altering the hours q. divine service on the following
day The battalion orderly sergeant reading
tho amendments by the light 81 a lantern To his
sh vering audience. District a.ter-orier.' he bel
lowed. Hours OF divine service tomorrow De-
nominations will p'rade as under: chn'ch OF Eng
land. 1880. Kau,holcs Si6.' The rain beat down
rclentessly he turned the page OF the order
book He observed at glance that the Prcsby-
ter.ans. Wcslcyans and Primitive Methodists were
all to parade AZ the same hour. the rest OF the
information he impaired In this precise form:
Fancy religions 10 o'clock. Right turn Dismiss. :"
A German correspondent comes to the rescue OF
his country men. concerning whom we expressed
surprise that they should prefer 10 use "A word of
four syl!ablcs when another word expressing the
same Thing In forty sy.lablca was available. H..
sends us II copy OF the "Nolnischc Vo,ksZeitung."
In which occurs n sentence OF Coz words. occupying
sixty nine lines ~ the newspaper
This worl-serpcnt occurs I'm "A legal Judgment. and
even the printers got To- hate Il after setting up
about four hundred and ATTY words OF H. So they
put In n fuiis,cp. which. IKE rife bullet In the
spinc of n boa constructor killed the whole SEN
tcnce Bui must really be nice to have
papers IN which you begin TO read sentence NJ
breakfast continue n In the train and trlumphantiy
reach the verb at office.-U-ondon Globe