Santa Fe new Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1898-1951, 1898-04-05
NEW HORROR OF WAR
AN APPALLING FEATURE That HAS
HITHERTO BEEN OVERLOOKED.

How Could England Expect Englishmen
to DO Their Duty In Battle With Their
Complications That Worry a Thinker.
Even the remote possibility of a
war is a terrible thing to contemplate,
said the thoughtful man who is always
making trouble for himself by thinking.
"There is something about that OBJ
servation that has a c%hestnutty flavor"
returned the man who makes it a point
never to do any more thinking than is
absolutely necessary to live.
"Ah, but the thought is peculiarly
horrible at this time," explained the
thoughtful man. "The conditions are
such that the result of a war-partic.
ularly a war with England-would be
simply awful. You see, in considering
these things the average man overlooks
entirely the most appalling features.
He fails to dwell sufficiently Oh the ter
! rible conflict that would wage in the
breast of many an Englishman when
he should be thinking only Of his duty
to his country.
"Picture to yourself the young Duke
Of Marlborough on a gunboat just out
side of New York harbor, went on the
thoughtful man, warming up to his
work. "Duty says he must shell the
town. Puff! A boom and a wreath OF
smoke, and what happens? He has
blown the roof off his father-in laws
house or made serious inroads into the
art treasures of his wife's uncle. Shall
be fire again? Think Of the torture Of
trying to answer that question. Anoth-
or shot may jeopardize a million or two
that he has hopes Of getting later, or it
may have a serious effect upon some OF
his wife's Investments. In addition to
this he has the fortune of the dowager
Duchess of Marlborough to think Of,
which amounted to about $7,000,O 900
when the late duke got his hands on it,
and for all he knows some fool gunner
may lop a cipher off of it without know
ing what he's doing. .
"And while these thoughts are fit
ting through the head Of the young
duke somebody in the next boat is very
likely worrying for fear he may knock
the spots out of q section Of the $12,-
900, 900 that Mrs. Marshall Q. Roberts
is said to have brought Colonel Ralph
Vivian, while Hon. A. H. Paget, who
got a little something with Miss Paul
inc Whitney, is trying to figure out
how he can avoid hitting the stock mar
ket, and the Right Hon. Joseph Cham
berlain is shooting blank cartridges to
avoid doing any harm to the securities
that he got with Miss Mary Endicott.
cat the same time L.. 2. Letter is on
top of the statue Of Liberty signaling to
Hon. George N. Curzon for heavens
sake to spare him and his fortune, if
only to show his appreciation Of the
IS, 900, 900 that he got with Miss Mary
Letter. Then there is the so, 900, 900
that Miss Cornelia Martin brought to
the Earl Of Craven and But why con-
tinue? Why harrow up the soul by pic
turing the awful struggles that would
come with such IA war? Why bring
home to England the fearful thought
that some Of her most promising young
men would be sorely tempted to turn
back from the war and tell her to chase
herself down to India or the Sudan,
where there is money to be made and
not money to be lost-where there are
no wealthy relatives to anger or finan-
oially disable?
II tell you, SIR" and the thoughtful
man became more emphatic, There Is
no limit to the terrors Of a war between
this country and any of the European
nations that are old enough to have IT,
ties to sell. Think Of Prince Hatzfeldt
storming the Stock Exchange with 4
gatling gun! Think Of the Count de
Castellane %bombarding railroads and
smashing dividends! In the old days il
was possible to go to wal and kill peo-
pie and burn towns without doing any
serious injury to oneself or ones rel
atives, but it isn't so now. Any shot ia
likely to be a boomerang, and there are
relatives everywhere. It is worthy Of
note, too, that, although this is a young
country comparatively, it is rapidly be-
coming the papa-in-law Of all the rest
Of creation"
The man who makes it a point never
10 do any more thinking than is neces-
sary observed the worried look Of the
man who is always making trouble foz
himself, yawned and replied carelessly
"a war would be sort Of tough,
wouldn't it?''-Chicago Post.