The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1898-03-05
SMARTER THAN FOUR WOMEN.
Junk Man Who bought a Fine Ward.
robe for Eighty-Six Cents.


robe for E~ighty-Six Cents.
"Cau you recommend an honest junk
man." asked Mrs. McGosh the other
day of one of the pensioners about her
place. We're going to move you know,
md we have a raft of old stuff l should
like to dispose Of"
IAN honest junkman!" was the pessi-
mistic reply. II can send you a junk
man, but he won't be honest"
Honest or not, his "junkship" came at
the time appointed.
81 hear you are going to move, amt
it?" he remarked as he waddled in at
the side gate.
The four women OF the family were
on the back steps to meet him, each and
every one of them having vowed to be
assharpandk keen as a razor in the trans
actions to follow. and all together hop
ing that the dealer in old clothing and
other c~ast-off articles would not get the
better of them in the bargains to be
driven for the old suits and dresses, the
old iron, the bottles, rags and other
stuff piled up in the separate heaps on
the cellar floor. The stuff they had to
offer had cost hundreds of dollars when
new, and they had figured it out that
not even a iunkman would think Of
offering less than $50 for the lot. At the
end of their bartering they had a differ
ent idea. and the junkman had their
stuff for a good deal less. too, than $50.
'Come on, junkey," said the leader of
the quartette of females, starting away
TO the cellar. We'll start in with the
cheap things first. What do you pay
for rags
Half a cent a pound" was the reply.
Three or four bags that must have
weighed more than 200 pounds were
produced and knocked down at half a
dollar. the junkman cutting the weight
by working the short arm of his steel
yards under his elbow.
"Now we'll sell the old Clothes" DE-
clared one of the ladies, dragging forth
an opera cloak of blue velvet with
ostrich feather trimming and lined
with yellow satin. "How much for
that?"
I'll Weigh it and see" replied the
junkman. and when he had. dGne SO
offered the grand sum of five cents.
what" exclaimed the young woman
ment like that"
Dots no garment init me-" replied
the junkman complacently. "every-
ting is rags, und I give you pig weight"
well. how much for this" asked an
other of the women, hauling forth a
cast-off dress suit once worn by her
Ten cents" replied the junkman,
making a recklessly eNtravagant guess
after "hefting" the suit in one hand.
"Well, l declared" gasped the young
lady in establishment. Five cents for
n silk-lined opera cloak as good as new
a little out of style, and ten cents
for a full dress suit"
well. don't sell 'em if you don't want
to-" said the junkman unconcernedly.
II can't stay here, though, if you don't
vant to sell"
eve do want to sell, but we thought
you would give something like what
are worth"
81 give all they are vorth-to me-" re-
piled the iunkman. off you vant that,
[ take it; eff You don't, GO"
The result was that the junkman got
he opera cloak and the evening suit for
Is cents-less by far than ne paid for
700 pounds of rags-and took away be-
sides tut glass bottles and finely
wrought chandeliers that couldn't be
duplicated for hundreds of dollars.
When the accounts were finally settled
Up the junkman paid over Sc cents for
lis plumber and the four women of the
McGosh family looked at one another
II foolish amazement.
"WelI. we've got rid of the old stuff at
rate" said the mother. land if that
miserable junkman did cheat us it is
better than having IL new house lit
cred up with a lot of plumber that is
10 use to anyone."-Chicago Times
ToraII