The Anaconda standard. [volume] (Anaconda, Mont.) 1889-1970, 1898-01-10
Itenes Picked Up
Here and There

HONS as compared 10 the SilpsHOu UldtlHeE
of presenting plays % years ago. when |
scenery was left to the imagination and /
one scene In its time played many parts. |
The advance agent then was king of /
paste and brushes. and with his overalls I
and working paraphernalia was a grne- /
some object. The "avant courier" of /
to-day is a gentleman, who, well Croomed, I
well-dressed and well behaved, impresses |
those with whom he comes in contact
James &. Davis was a fin de steele aVant /
courier. who had the distinction of her +
aiding two well-known attractions. lie /
was one day sitting in smoking car en-
route TO Anaconda, where one of his at
fractions was booked to play. The easy
motion OF the train caused Jim 10 fall
asleep. and he fell into n dream so real
istic that he could scarce be made to be-
lieve that ii was but a dream. And this
is what he dreamed:
The conductor called. "All out for Ana
conda." Jim threw away his cigar. gath
cred up his belongings. and giving his
sealskin overeoat "A shaking. marched out
of the ear to the station platform. There
he was met by a delegation who read
him an address of welcome and at its
conclusion the band played Hail to the
Chief while he was conducted To car
riage drawn by four white horses and
driven to the leading hotel Of the city,
preceded by the fire company and the
band. At the hotel he met Manager John
Mcguire. who told him the entire house
was sold for his attraction and showed
him the files of papers with columns OF
laudatory press notices, including a por-
trait and biography of the famous j. c.
Davis.
During the afternoon Jim was busy re-
ceiving in the parlor OF the hotel the lead
ing citizens of Anaconda and expatiating
on the merits of his two attractions. In
the evening he attended grand BAH Civ
en- in his honor at the hotel, where gaiety
reigned supreme. He was in the seventh
heaven of delight and leading the
belle of the city In to supper when
rough voice shouted. Say, governor, give
me your ticket" II gave YOU my ticket
for Anaconda" replied Mr. Davis. well"
said the conductor, you're 10 miles be-
yond now" and ringing the bell, stopped
the train ut Stuart and put Jim off
who trudged back TO Anaconda in the
snow, meditating on tho realities OF theat-
rical life compared to 1.-THE Agents
Dream
They hadn't met since 1897. The other
day they met by billboard.
How dor said one.
'Helio!' said the other; haven't seen
YOU since last year. Come over and have
something
NO
"Why?"
1--WE quit"
Are you one Of those swear-off
out?''
mo. never swore Off anything before
but I'll tell you. This looks like Il good
year-one that has something good in
it for me. And feeling that way | want
to deserve everything that ] expect to
get this year, and SO | won't drink, gam
BILE. chew tobacco, swear. smoke. go In
debt, kick the eat or can my dog. And
want to cordially salute every man
against whom | have held an imaginary
ct q H.
every petty prejudice. ! want to be a
good fellow In every way that you can
put it, / call off everything. I'll start anew
and try to be somebody. So can't accept
your invitation to drink"
How about that fellow that wouldn't
trust you for a pair of shoes last month2
VIII YOU cordially salute him when you
meet him again."
Hadn't thought of him. Guess I won't
What are YOU going 10 do about that
rattle for horse? You hold about dozen
| chances on IL, you know
"Oh, well. I'll shake for 1t. of course,
| but after that I'll quit dice for good"
And the races next summer
That's different. I've got fast horse.
| you know"
| looms? That makes IT bad for the sa-
! looms. You always could store away a
| deal of beer but then | could put you
under the table every time. couldn't =
NO you couldn't. / can stand. up under
a bigger load than you can, I'll bet
| "I'll bet you s. that you can't"
Put up
Once in the saloon the stakes were In
| the bartenderss hands and the first Install
! ment of beer on the bar Late In the
night one man was asleep in chair and
/ another under table. When tile
"swamper" went around To clean mp he
aroused the couple from their slumhars
They walked to the bar and took eye
| openers.
Il win tho stakes" said the man who
didn't swear off. Il put you under tbs
| table"
mo you didn't the man of resolves
replied. you were under the table,
I'm leave 1t to the 'swamper.
"All right"
The "swamper'. was called and askee
to point out the man he pulled from UNI
der the table. That official settled his
| gaze on the man with n cigarette in hi:
mouth and said:
You wuz purity drunk. sab. but yoaf
pahrdner was wuss Off EN- you. You WI;
in de chaih an him wuz unner de ia
BILE
So the man who had made the resolu
lions puffed harder on his snipe as h,
nocketed the stakes and stalked out o
the saloon. saying he disappeared
| through the doorway; II feel just Xix.
doing somebody, so I'll go down and licl
that fellow that called me liar the othel
day
Occasionally a few Indians come int
town from their camp near here ant
look at show windows. purchase ginge
root and castor oil. frighten dogs an,
scratch and grunt. Yesterday trio o
them stood before large picture alleges
10 he "A representation of the massacre
Of Custer and his brave company OF sol
diers one of the Indians wore a whit.
f cowboy hat canvas 0SpreQaf5 lfnpI
shirt and standup collar. cravat. sus
penders. moccasins and inteiligen
countenance. The others wore whateye
they could find. One appeared TO be tn
critic of the trio. and his gestures, ar
ticuations and general demeanor con
WINGED the spectator ii the pantomim
that he was giving his companions III
straight of H. He pointed 10 a buck draw
ing IA bead on whit" man and smiled
+ The others smiled also. Then he pu
his finger on a number of dead men an
grunted. His companions gfaHtea like
a "A