davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
Precious Document.

A good story is told at the expense
of the custodian of the foreign docu-
ments department of the French Ma
tional Library. The New York Times
is authority for the anecdote.
During the visit of King Chulalong-
korn, of Siam, highly priced paper
that no one had been able to decipher
satisfactorily, because of the mixture
of Siamese and Chinese characters, was
unearthed and shown to the Siamese
visitor.
The King glanced at the precious
paper and then laughed heartily, after
which The went ON to explain that this
carefully guarded and highly priced
document was merely fire insurance
policy drawn up for a Chinese company
by some Siamese firm, and that his own
signature, which it bore, was such as
all similar documents contain. 1t was
moreover, written by one of his secre
taries detailed for that work
That document is not so highly priced
as it was.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
Naws of Minor Note.

The Madrid cabinet has declue' " " "i
more of the steamers Of the 0p""''"
Trans Atlantic Company.
The municipality of Malaga mas s "pt The
eized to the American consul there III ~
attack by a mob on the consulate
Mexicans and SpaniardS Oh Tue a;ncp
border have been growing arrogant ' - i
talk of war with Spain started III" "
feared serious trouble will occur :.
The widest scenes of appfo'": S' rnars
the Massachusetts Legislature III I'm In
greeted the war appropriation I Dm', the
just twenty minutes from the ne, 'I nIark to
bill was first introduced By tne me Gov.
the final reading for engros slno 0io
Wolcott had at his disposal 1'''' tho
At Mississippi City, Miss .,; ~ns'g pried
sheriff is also tax collector, tn,eS todroom
omen the window of the shefln 10 HI his tax
on the night of the day he ma can l his
collections, and with fshnet 'D the win
trousers, and, pulling them rem s sberiff slept
dow. rifed the pockets, liz '"N
with light in his room'
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

water. At a little expense the Cape
government provides an apparatus for
the use Of the farming community and
drilling operations are in progress in
nearly all parts of the country. 1t is
generally believed that there is abund-
ance of water at depth of from fifty
to a hundred feet, but the finds are few
and weak. Unlike Australia there are
no subterranean rivers to tap. The
hope of the farmer lies in the conser-
walton of the rainfall, which, If not
stored in dams, quickly runs off into
the SHUTS and "spruits," and leaves
the parched earth but little refreshed.
In many places the drinking supplies
regularly fall short and the farmers
are reduced to the thick, Opaque con-
tents of a dam. In the remoter dis
tricts the Beers experience this acute
". A Boer recently called at an En-
ghshmans house while on a journey
and asked for drink. The English
man had good supply and gave him
sparkling draught. The Dutchman was
greatly surprised and in his kitchen
.'taal" expressed himself highly de-
lighted with such a sweet drink, as
he observed, cit had neither taste nor
smell -
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
The Grave of Eve.

At Jiddah in Arabia, the Mohamme-
dams locate the grave of Eve. A small
temple, utterly out of proportion to the
Moslem conception Of the first woman
(they claim she was 200 feet talD is
erected above the ashes. The structure
is in bad repair, and If it rained often
in Arabia, Mother Eve would have a
rather damp resting place. AS it is, a
big palm tree has forced it's way
through the room. The spot Is the
mecca Of a seven-year pilgrimage.
On June 3, which is alleged to be the
anniversary of the death of Abel, the
doors of the temple remain open all
night. On that night the spirit of Eve
mourns for the loss of her murdered
son. In fear and trembling the pill
grims listen to awful sounds of Ia
mentation emanating from the tomb.
There are usually in the throng one
or two scoffers, who claim to recognize
the voices Of the priests in the doleful
walls, but their opinions do not carry
weight with the majority.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

der janitor is kept at a yearly expen-
diture of $135, and to prevent Arthur
from getting cold $50 is expended on
fuel. The interest on the 1894 that
it cost to build the handsome two-story
brick schoolhouse in which he Is
taught amounts to $416O8. Thus the
total cost of the schooling Of this one
child is $1,1S6.O8.
Arthur is a quiet little chap Of 8
years, as black as the tabled Egyptian
darkness, with big round eyes that
look out upon the world without the
least sign Of establishment or concern
at the extravaganza Of his education.
That he drinks in knowledge at the
public expense at the rate Of $3O.41 per
week, or $6.08 per day, is no cause Of
wonder to him. It has not been charg-
ed that his teachers quarrel over
which shall instruct him, but it is a
known fact that he has to furnish the
excitement for the school, because he
is the only scholar in the new Lovejoy
school, erected solely for the colored
children.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
some Ludicrous Mistakes Compounded
in the Composing-Room.

Some LudicrOuS M1StdASs
in the Composing-R Room.
.sWhat is this?' exclaimed a COM
hositor who was expecting to be pro-
NOTED to a proofreadership shortly.
8. Sermons in stones, books in the run
ming brooksv Impossible! He means,
of course, Sermons in books and stones
in the running brooks" And new
reading Of Shakespeare appeared next
morning. A sporting compos1tor
thought "Cricket on the Hearth" must
he a slip Of the pen. He made 1t
"Cricket on the Heath" A writer on
angling had the joy of seeing MS SEN
tence. s'The young salmon are begT
ming to rum" printed, 'sThe yo'
salmon are beginning to swim, =
other thoughtful compositor h.. ing
been at work. Happier was the trans
formation of the sentence, Bring me
nv toga," into Bring me my toys.
There is less subtle vein of humor
in the story of the editor who wrote
during an election, 1.-THE battle is now
opened" The compositor spelled "bat-
tie" with an co." and the other side
said, of course, that they had suspected
it from the first. 1t was by similar
mistake that the late Baker Pasha,
who might fairly be described as
| "battle-scarred veteran" was called
"battle-scared veteran" the libel be-
ing by no means purged when the
newspaper called the gallant officer
'bottle-scarred veteran" Owing to an
error in printing the announcement "A
sailor, going to sea- his wife desires the
prayers of the congregation" became
"a sailor going to see his wife deserves
the prayers of the congregation" 1t Is
not necessary to believe this In order
to enjoy it. The statement, "MesSrs
IS preserves cannot be beaten was
rather vitiated as an advertisement by
the omission of OBJ in the last word.
Innocently gay was the newspaper re-
port which said that the London ex-
press had knocked down a COW and
cut it into 'calves. "-Gesta Typograph-
lea
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
HOUSE WITH A HISTORY
Structure Which Has More than Com.
mon Interest for Masons.

In Canton, N. Y, stands a house
which has more than a common inter-
est for the masons Of the country. 1t
shows, in the first place, 1.-The royal
arch," which seems to be shape of
mystic meaning to the order. And in
the second place, it was built to fiaunt
the principles of it's builder, Paul Boyn-
ton, in the faces Of his enemies, the
anti Masons.
Boynton came to Canton in 1881 and
was prominently identified with the
Masonic order. About that time cru
SADIE against the organization started;
there were pamphlets published on
Masonry Exposed" and the like. In
the excitement one prominent opponent
of the Masons disappeared and his
comrades alleged foul play. Boynton's
house was burned in the trouble that
followed.
Boynton forthwith built another
house. 1t is the "royal arch house,
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
Definition of Eternity.

Here is schoolboy's definition of
eternity: "When our ships all come in:
when the sea gives up her dead; when
Father Time hangs up his scythe; when
the heavens are rolled up like scroll:
when Gabriel blows the rams horn:
when the solar system collapses; whe<
we find the lost Charlie Ross and the
man who struck Billy Patterson; when
Johnny gets his gun; when society be-
comes pure; and after the ball is over
then will be eternity Orleans
Times-Democrat.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

1t has long been the fashion to place
upon menu and dinner cards sketches
and quotations to suggest topics of con-
yersation, but Partisan hoSteses have
adopted an opposite course. Their form
ula reads, while sitting at table,
speaking on the subject of the Dreyfus
question is forbidden" In like fashion
Catherine II. once posted on the walls
of the Hermitage: ut is forbidden to
have an ill-tempered air, to exchange
unkind words, to speak i'll of any one
whatever. All quarrels must be left
Mt the door with hat and sword" How
beautiful to be dictator! Yet even in
this land Of free speech, the De LONE
indiscretion suggests the wisdom of
dictatorship over ones own tongue.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

One result of the financial depression
one of the good things that often
come out of evil-has been the back-to-
the-land movement among urban peo-
pie. The illusions that drew thousands
from the farms to the cities have been
shattered by the hard conditions en-
tailed by the panic. The vital, ever
present, unacceptable necessities Of hfc
are bread and butter, and these the
city can give only at second hand.
Whatever storms may strew the indus
trial sea with wreck, food, shelter and
clothing are assured to the man on the
city must walk the streets in vain
search for work.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

is your coffin.-Rory of the Hills" The
men who issued the posters We're I'M
prisoned for their offenses, but the
country was placarded as daringly dur
ing their Imprisonment as before. Now
copy Of one of these posters is as
scarce as hens teeth, and, though not
a bit artistic, they are treasured by
poster collectors as if they were print
ed in letters Of gold after design by
some master draughtsman.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

product being 2O,O72, 758 tons, valued
at the mines at $14,472,529, or an aver
age Of u cents ton. Pennsylvania
stood at the head of the list, with a
product of 1884, 800 tons Of bitumi-
nous, valued at $37, 1854 1876, an average
cost of 70 cents a ton at the mines. 1t
will surprise people to learn that West
Virginia stands third in coal production
of all the United States, her total reach
ing 13, 556, 97S tons, valued at $685., 617,
an average of 81 cents a ton at the
mines, which was the lowest Of any
State in the Union. Ohio coal cost an
average of Is cents, and, although the
total was 100000 tons less than was
mined in West Virginia, it sold for near
~ 100000 more money. Alabama
stands number five in the order Of pro-
duction. Then come Iowa, Maryland
and Indiana. Coal is mined in twenty
nine States and Territories, and the
national product last year was 1926,
1888 tons, valued at sos, O94, 707, or near
ly 81 a ton at the mines. OF this 2,122,-
4O8 tons was anthracite, produced IN
Pennsylvania alone. The average cost
Of mining anthracite was $1.65 ton,
and the average cost of bituminous was
81 cents. Out in Oregon they pay $3.1
a ton for mining coal, in Nebraska $3.64
and in California 1926. The increase
in the tonnage sent out last year was a
little more than 3 per cent, while the
anthracite product decreased nearly
2.25O,0O0 tons.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
Advertisers Are Immortal.

Great advertisers live in the history
of the city and the prosperity of their
firms long after they themselves have
"shuff1ed off this mortal coil;;'' their an
nouncements In the newspapers contin-
ue to bear fruit after the advertisers
are dead. On the other hand, the nom
advertising business man is dead to the
community long before he leaves this
life; and his business is more than apt
to die with him.-Savannah News.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

On the shores of North Lubec, a little
town in eastern Maine, there has been
established an enterprise that seems to
suggest hmitless possibilities. 1t is
plant for extracting from sea-water,
by a. secret process, the single grain of
gold which every ton contains. Since
the undertaking is novel, all the appli-
ances are necessarily crude; but even
now the yield of gold is said to be re-
munerative. AS business proposition
it seems, at first thought, an absurdity
to treat ton of water for the sake.
of a grain of gold. Manifestly, how
ever, the enterprise would be subject
to the same general conditions that de-
termine, say, the ACCESSIBILITY of min
ing low-grade ores. And the marine
miner, if we may so speak, has the ad-
vantage of an exhaustless claim for
the total mass of sea-water is estimat-
ed at nearly e-and-a-half million
million-millions tons. The new expert
ment is not only interesting in itself;
it is significant, as a probable prelude
to other efforts to recover the riches
held in this mighty reservoir. No one
but the scientist can comprehend the
wealth of the waters-and even he hes
itates to attempt to measure it. But
he is able to name, in addition to gold,
more than twenty valuable compo-
nents of the ocean salts. These, besides
the chlorides and sulphides of sodium,
magnesium, potassium and calcium,
which are the principal components,
include arsenic, lithium, rubidfum, cae-
SUM, silicon, boric acid, bromine, 10
dine fluorine as acid, and the oxides of
nickel, cobalt, manganese, aluminium,
zinc, silver, lead, copper, barium and
strontium as basic compounds. Should
circumstances ever seem to call for the
utilization of these treasures, science
will find the way. 1t Is likely, indeed,
that long before the need of them
arises, commercial enterprise will have
been attracted to this new field of ex-
ploitation which is capable Of adding
so largely to the wealth of the world.
There have been pessimists who
argued that in the distant future in
ereasing population might exhaust
natural resources. They did not real
lie that man has but just begun to get
acquainted with his dwelling place.
The sea, as we'll as the land, may some
day satisfy all the needs that are
known to the present age, and meet
new demands of which we do not even
dream
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

One man with brace of pistols and
the inclination to use them put to
flight five bandits who stopped train
I'm New Mexico the other week. Here
Is new support for the theory that a
little ordinary courage displayed by
passengers, train crews and express
messengers will furnish all needed pro-
lection against the rufians who so often
succeed in duplicating on land the
achievements of the old sea rovers.
There is not the faintest excuse for the
docility almost invariably shown when
trains and stages are attacked.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

Spain has now population of about
100000 people, and of these, accord
ing to a recent report Of the Spanish
Government, nearly 100000 profess
no occupation. Grandees and beggars
alike disclaim the plebeian virtue Of
daily toll. There are nearly 100000
registered beggars, half of them fe-
males, in this poor little land, and one
third of the entire population is entire
Jy unlettered. The ancient social
canker" of contempt for work and
workers has eaten the life from Spain.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

A candidate for the office of Cover
nor in a Southern State has single
plank in his platform: Simple. una
dulterated, unpurchasable, unbulldoz-
able manhood" An excellent working
summary for every one, candidate or
voter.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

"Cooper's worksY replied the shop
man. Eyes, madam; here the the
Misunderstanding Tales II don't
think I want Them" replied the shop
per. Hasn't Mr.. Cooper written any
Golf Stocking Tales yetY-Harper'-
Bazaar.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
MESSAGE THAT MEANT DEATH.

The Famous "No Rent" Poster Which
Landed Many Irishmen in Prison.
Here is relic of a time made excit-
ing by agitation in Ireland. It is the
famous mo Rent" poster, which was
one of the features of the movement Of
1881 that landed so many ardent Irish
men in prison.
The National League of Ireland, the
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

Amendments to the Constitution of
the United States, frequently proposed
by theorists and Missionaries, seldom
command enough support to receive Sc
rious consideration. There is a sound
conservatism, which fortunately is pop
ular, against meddling with the text of
that historic instrument which is the
great charter of our institutions. There
is now upon the calendar of the Senate,
however, a joint resolution, which has
received the favorable report of the
Judiciary Committee, and which has
behind 1T the force of its provision for
possible exigency. This amendment,
which 1T is proposed to submit to the
Legislatures of the several States for
their approval, is designed to meet the
contingency of the death of President
elect, between the time when the cleo
toral college casts Its vote, early in Jan
uary, and March 4, the date of the in
auguration. At present, there is no pro-
vision by which another President
could be elected, and Congress has no
authority to supply the deficiency. The
President elect occupies a position of
peculiar responsibility and of possible
danger. Had the plot to assassinate
Lincoln at Baltimore ON his way to
Washington succeeded, there would
have been no legal method to choose
lis successor and a state OF anarchy
would have preceded the civil war. Had
Blaine been nominated by the Minneap-
oils convention and elected, there would
have been a similar dilemma, as his
lamented death occurred ON Jan. 70.
Four Presidents of the United States
have died Within a few weeks after
their Inauguration. 1t would seem,
therefore, entirely wise to confer ian ex-
press terms upon Congress the power
to provide for the case where there is
no person entitled to hold the Office OF
President OF Vice President, declaring
what officer shall then act as Presi-
dent The constitutional lawyers Of
Congress may split hairs to their brains
content over the precise form and Ian
guage of this amendment, but its pur-
pose is as plain as Its need is obvious.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

"Ever since I was a child,' remarks
Mrs. Frances Hodgson Burnett, Il have
felt an overwhelming sense of RESPONSE
bility for the universe" Perhaps that
is why Mrs. Burnett has grown tired OF
assuming the responsibility of hus-
band
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
Severe Attack of Ptety.

The DOg-faced Boy-The Human Os-
trich appears to be getting very relig-
ious.
The Albino Girl-Yes, he wouldn't eat
anything but stained cathedral glass
for his dinner-New York Evening
World.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

pended by the pub
lie on the education
Of one simple indi-
vidual. His name is
Arthur Obey. For
him a teacher Is
employed at $270
per annum, for him
a principal is en-
gagged at 1915 per
annum, to keep his
T. 80.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

The extraordinary safety Of the mails
is illustrated in the history Of the
Round Robin of the class of "A Yale,
which in fifty-three years Of travel
across the continent one hundred and
fifty times and journeyed more than
five hundred thousand miles without
once being lost
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

The other day a coroner's jury re-
turned a verdict that 'the decedent
came to his death by being struck by
railroad train in the hands of a re-
ceiyer." That must be deadly
weapon.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

'Nope," said Mr.. Rockwell, as he
wiped his glasses, I'm afraid Johns
college education amt goin' to do him
much good, after all" why, Silas,"
his anxious wife cried, what makes
you say that?" "He admitted in the
store yesterday that there was still a
few things I knew more about than
him."-Cleveland Leader.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

A Washington scientist wants all
American subsidiary coins made Of
nickel, because they would be durable
and velvety to the touch" There's the
rub! What is really needed is a coin
that Is hard to the ''touch."
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

A Maryland man suddenly died the
other day while laughing heartily at
Joke. The dispatches do not tell what
the joke was, but it must have been
perfectly killing.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

A California thiei sold his plumber
for $14 and with the money paid an
honest debt AS soon as the moral OF
this incident has been studied out 1t
will be duly announced.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
Formal Declaration of War Is
Made in a Hurry.
RECOMMENDED BY A MESSAGE
1t Declares SPANS Action Was Beqiu.
ming of HOstilities.

President Mckinley Asked Conoroa.
to Make Formal Declaration Of
War, and a Bill in Accordance w;+,,
His Message Passed the House II
One Minute and Forty-one Seconds
Senate Acts Almost as Quickly.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

No matter which diplomatic shell poor
old China picks up, the pea will not be
under it. It isn't the Ce1estiaPs game.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
nisinfect the Books.

Health Commissioner Wende is at
present engaged on plan whereby
books in circulation at the Buffalo pub
lie library and the public schools may
be diSinfected.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

The Emperor Of China is known as
The brother Of the sun, but he is not $50
warm"
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

Mr.. Moody says it is easier to con-
vert a man than to convert woman.
Who doubts it? There is so much more
from which to convert a man.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

aDo American wives consider their
Husbands merely as bread winners! r
asks London paper. If the American
wife is welded to an English duke she
LdoaSn't
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
TO CoRREsPoNDENTs

An communications for this paper shotld be accom-
panied by the of the author; not necessarily fos
ublcaton but evidence Of good faith ON the part
of the writer Write only side of the paper Be
particularly careful In giving and Dates to navs
the letters and figures plain and distinct.
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28
ALToN's EXPENSIVE BOY.

Taxpayers Put Up Nearly 81 200 a
Year for His Schooling,
1t costs the public of Alton. ILL.,,
$1,1S6.OS annually to educate one black
boy. This is the largest sum ever e1-
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

executive committee of which issued
and signed this remarkable document,
was opposing landlordism by coercing
the tenantry into not paying rent. Such
tenants as were known to intend to
defy the National League and to pay
had these mo rent" posters nailed to
the doors. In the corners were certain
terrifying sentences. your fate is GER
tain if you pay rent.-Capt. Noon
light" was the sentiment in one, while
the other showed a coffin bearing be-
meath it the cheering inscription, 'This
Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1898-04-28

Down in Kentucky a bank cashier
has been convicted and denied a new
trial. It's a poor defaulter who can't
steal enough to protect himself.