The Wadsworth dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1892-1899, 1898-02-09
SPARKS

the beauty contest.
A small boy thus defined scandal 1T
is Whon nobody amt done nothin', and
somebody goes and tells"
One of the first signs parents have
that their girl is growing up is when
they begin to keep their bedroom doors
locked at night.
A Carson correspondent of the DIS
PATCH mentions the name of Eugene
Howell Tor Governor. If he was nomi-
mated on the Silver ticket he would poll
a good many Republican votes.
OF the failure to institute a Good Tenn
plar's lodge here the Reno Journal re-
marks: "The Wadsworthites know
when they have got enough and res
trictions, however good the intent, are
unnecessary"
Theodore Hoffman and Mamie Shehee
were united in marriage at Reno u week
ago Sunday night. By the way the item
has been going the rounds it is a won
der the newspaper fraternity didn't turn
the rules in grief.
Andy Russell WAS sick last week and
the maddest man We have seen for a
month. Some kind friend brought
him a dish OF turkey but Andy's throat
was stopped up and he couldn't even
get a feather down.
Sing a song Of penitence, a fellow full
of rye; four and twenty serpents dancing
in his eye when his eye was opened he
shouted for his life; wasn't he a pretty
chump to 20 before his wife? His hat
was in the parlor underneath a chair,
his boots were in the hallway, his coat
was IN the stair; his trousers in the
kitchen, his collar on the shelf; but he
hasn't any notion where he was himself
when the morn wal breaking some one
heard him call his head was in the ice
box, which was the best Of all.
John Day is very o~bservant. If the
water should run out OF his pipe after he
he has dug and cussed and dug for five
days, he would observe it. He observes
just how the boys act and look when
they feel particularly good: The vague
70 never walks; the saw man just slops
over and has a full flush the newspaper
man walks pigeon-toed anyhow but then
his heels come down with a thud;
bonanza king sits up and drinks day and
night for seven OF them and wears vio-
let's all the time; the other one says
"sic EN-" tells of the time Butte was in
its glory and he wore diamonds and is
going to Olinghouse tomorrow to dig out
u few thousands and do Frisco proper;
the shoe mar just rushes the growler
till the boxes get hot the bootblack
rushes through the Truckee river and
takes to the brush; the president OF the
corporation laughs and cries by turns,
gets hysterical and then sick the saloon
man wants to tell funny stories and eat
limburger cheese; the doctor gets solid
and dead level to his collar button, then
uneasy and makes a sneak to his labra-
tory from whence he comes back straight
to guy the rest OF the gang the loaters
fall by the wayside and are put in the
cooler where there are swelled heads
and hot coppers and no ice water. And
then seeing it vas all day and no thawed
out pipes with him we left.
Mr.. Forrest, of the s. F. Bulletin, who
has been sojourning in Wadsworth sew
eral weeks, broke into our sanctum late
ly with a 500 smile. We thought he
would let it drop if we gave him time.
and he did. He dragged his chair up
next to ours conidentially, swore us to
observe his copyright and opened ND
that he had struck a sensation. Over in
the Indian camp back of town he had
found a squaw with twins he was sure
were white ahd had been stolen and he
Was going to work it up Tor his sheet.
We were downcast for a while to miss
such good stuff, patted him on the back
and persuaded him to wade in and re-
ceive the thanks of some father for re-
storing his lost darlings. We were
standing with Mr.. Forrest and a large
party OF friends yerterday on Pacific
avenue where the Pabst brewery is loca-
ted, when he gripped us by the arm and
whispered tragically, There she comes
now with those unfortunate infants and
l will have this matter Strengthened up
in front OF these citizens" When the