The record-union., 1898-10-16

tions. Lands, claiming that he had
been misrepresented, was urging his
question, when Mr.. Johnson abruptly
said: "I decline to be interrupted by
the gentleman"
You dare not be interrupted" quoth
Landis.
Turning toward him Mr.. Johnson re-
Piled: That sounds like the challenge
Of a pigmy to giant, and pay my
self no very high compliment when l
say it,
There was a lively little tilt while
Jerry Simpson was discussing the par
agraph on seeds in the agricultural ap-
preparation bill. An effort was being
made to strike out the appropriation
for their purchase and distribution.
Jerry said that three hundred thousand
people lived in his district and they
We're nearly all farmers. The seed dis
tribution was about the only thing that
kept them in touch with the Govern
ment at Washington. 1T is the only
benefit they get in the line of paternal-
ism," he added
Here General Henderson Of Iowa,
shouted: Well you are a connecting
link, Jerry"
Yes, SIR responded the statesman
from Medicine Lodge; "and 1 am a
farmer who farms the farm and not
the farmer
GROSVENOR'S HUMBLE POSE.
A laughable incident occurred while
General Grosvenor was discussing the
civil service question. He referred to
William E. Barrett of Massachusetts,
as one who had been suddenly born in
% - -
party. Mr. Barrett a moment after
ward interrupted him by saying that
he wanted a report of the words used
in reference to the cuckoo matter. 1t
was evident that he was incensed at
General Grosvenor's remark. In his
interruption he said: II asked him
General Grosvenor) sotto voce to whom
he referred, and he said that he re-
ferred to me-"
Yes" Grosvenor replied, there was
so much voce or so much sotto that l
did not hear the remark
In the debate on the Indian appro-
priation bill Jerry Simpson made an at
tack on the Dingley bill. Governor
Dingley, in reply, said that during Jer-
rvs services in past Congresses he had
always dwelt upon the miseries in Kan
sas. In this session not a word had
been heard from him about these mis-
cries. This was an indication Of pro-
gress Jerry shouted back: well,
Governor, I will say that Kansas is
now under Populist rule and has no
miseries"
That's misery enough in ITSELF"
roared General Henderson of Iowa.
And everybody guffawed.
In a discussion concerning the Tel
Ter resolution the veteran Grosvenor
was neatly turned by his colleague,
James A. Norton. Norton accused him
of indorsing the demonetization of sill
Yer. Grosvenor said that he was not
in the House at the time it was done.
You were one of the gentlemen" Mr..
Norton insisted.
II was not" General Grosvenor re-
piled. Il was humble and private
citizen of the State"
You were not a humble and private
CITIZEN" Mr.. Norton shouted. you
have always been a public and a noisy
one"
The retort excited great laughter, be-
cause Grosvenor usually comes out
ahead in such contests.
SHERMAN'S SHORT RETORT.
A laughable incident occurred during
the consideration of the Indian appro-
priation bill. Mark Smith Of Arizona,
was ridiculing the idea Of educating the
Indian. He alluded to the thousands
of Indians in Arizona, and wanted TO
know what they would do with them
when they learned to read and write.
James Sherman of Utica, replied that
they would make citizens out Of them.
Yes" responded Smith, you would
make a citizen out of him as soon as
he could sing a psalm"
yes" put in Mr.. Sherman, 1--WE
would make a Christian citizen out Of
him then"
To which Mark responded: And all
that he is able to do is to recite verse
and sing a psalm. There are thieves in
the penitentiary who can do BOTH
Il don't know about that" Mr.. Sher-
man gravely replied; Il never was in
the penitentiary"
Another amusing scene occurred when
Henry D. Clayton of Alabama was
comparing the manufacturers dinner
in New York, at which President Nc
Kinley was guest, with BelshaZZar's
feast. He said that they dined in a
hotel that cost $4,000, 600, at a ban
quet that cost SIS or $40 plate. "Oh,
no." shouted Albert M. Todd Of Kala-
mazoo "a thousand plates were spread
there at 500 EACH ....
My gracious" exclaimed Mr.. Clay
ton, "$15 or $50 ought to have been
enough A man who eats that much
at meal eats a bale of cotton in Ala
bama."
Yes" interjected Jerry Simpson, "S15
or $50 would hardly pay for the tooth
picks at such a meal"
Well" said Long Jim Richardson of
Tennessee, "a man who would eat a
hundred dollars worth at a meal would
eat up two mules in Tennessee
SENATORIAL AMENITIES.
So much for amenities in the House
And the Senate is not behindhand. The
other day Senator Allen of Nebraska
was talking. Senator Spooner of Wis
consin said that if the Senator would
read the rule carefully he must admit
that he was mistaken. Mr.. Allen re-
piled that he was not a skilled parlia-
mentarian, like his friend from Wis
consin. Mr.. Spooner said that the SEN
ceeded him in that respect
"Or like my friend from Maine (Mr.
Frye" continued Mr.. Allen, "who
shakes his head at my proposition. I
wish he would nod it occasionally; it
would be gratifying"
Il wish I could" responded Senator
Frye, land preserve my conscience"
ooh, l don't think that would trouble
you great DEAL" Senator Allen non
chalantly responded, and even Senator