The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1898-07-31
NEW IN PARLOR LECTURES.
Plan or A BACHELOR GIRL ON BAu
TERMS WITH FORTUNE

- ~ uDhC 10 ANehE 3AuouN NV
tinEuished People md Of the Lecturers
to Tell About Observation-Disclosures OF the
Subject by n Woman Who Writes Poetry.
There Is one kind Of misery which generally
prefers a wido berth and no company to speak
Of. This is the misery described by young per-
sons as being boiling hot" There Ia n tempera-
ture ut which water ovaporates. There Is also
a temperature at which ones love for society
evaporates. This temperature was reached
one night last week.
Nevertheless, that evening happened TO be
the very ono whom three or four bachelor girls
met In an apartment belonging to two OF their
friends. Naturally. Inside OF two minutes the
conversation was OF at a, canter on the line OF
the weather. After a series OF remarks which
would wound even the feelings OF the weather
clerk. they all fetched up with one question:
How In the world do you happen to he in
town." And to this there was such q unani-
nous reply that 1t seemed as II 1t ought TO be
chanted solemnly by a Greek chorus:
Because l couldn't afford to get outl'
Then followed several frank and funny tales
Of financial woe. Women used TO consider II .
disgrace to be hard up. Girl bachelors have
found out that 1t is sometimes irolic. some-
times discomfort. sometimes heartache and
hunger. but always an experience. They have
learned to look at 1t and treat II with an ironi-
cal good fellowship which takes away half iS
power to hurt. So these impecunious young
women laughed and sympathized over one an
others sklmpinG. and were fertile In SUCCESS
lions for wooing fortune more efectually.
Well. I've been thinking It over" said .
| young woman who writes poetry and had just
declared that she had taken her luncheon. or .
substitute for It, by biting OF the top Of a cork
penholder and chewing 1t vigorously while she
composed q sonnet. i've been thinking 10
! over and I've decided to 60 In for parlor leo-
lures, ! tell you. that's tho way to make
money, Just look at So-and-Sot She goes
round with three pieces she's patched UP about
her nsIv,t sSgs RI bSsrirS 9P h. P s%oDE sI pTY Di 20 for tn"
money and 81 in Il respectful Ct sIIsnHpss to hear 50:
ences, But there's something about the scheme
1 peopf RswSSs T f2e EdocEiSsdf tRS SefiifHl Pm ng SoiSs % q
WOO the muse BY writing sonnets ia betteR
What arc y9u H going to lecture abopt2"
ni vel V9H. I'xs got ptv E new st t 'S%b stSt AND Tot thHHt eta
most ,parior lectures, when you boil them down,
are along one line. They all depend for thelR
tdifHaEHuisEhed G PERSON ON or persons SSqSGI' whom no the lee.
turer has met. Sometimes II, hasn't amounted
across her the 2l eeturer 81 path h' Within at least
opera-Glass range. and that's enough founda-
b BODY s Ioys sa}E to t Res an a sGbSfd dist PIn ag1nr}RS,f' p aSS5is'
and talk about them. too. Lecturers are NOT
the only persons WHO love to punctuate their
discourse with familiar names.
the ~" o Vas gGP sg . 0TeFn q. list O{ bg9sSSi tSsE Pss65l sT tea
S aGaiEn 1as @sP ip qe anf Western este Pf t9%as. and {Hh%sfiRl
sKpSEien9es had not been partIcIlarly inspi13
one up nfS TS 9onS SaY had dine ed With %fRf an NJ auttRorrts
here SnS'H IN New YoFk and iiy f y i The same boar 4
tioneil !" so ] ] tIt myysSIf aI9ns t{fs same Iine,
and tanoEn By the isSct that t once lnnched
VIII is also a a novelist. rs Kind Of funny. oiissnaVS
Il? And there's one friend OF mine who, when
doing i Just ofIhand, about Duran the ia:
him ~ many as three times. But 1 always
turn d u cree away oSo soon 10 after re tb ( answer .tEsTg her.
as she. 10 certain to do. that Duran and I are
great friends:
poss g } @is 81 s saFes; &c fots s I G so%s e9 aPa / 1se;
have had, and might fake some which I
b 6fP a pstlo had fslR end B sS | Fs ibi nRR an { cav sYs559 20 Set sGEs
That That linz aSnI has toe many EIHr l i'm 'bs.} =; 10 ARR ~ bod
met all the distinguished people we would like
to know, I've a perfectly un bounded capacity
ffs m a eaPsci t9e w SRfiSsht R hns be ed the !sr fbFtRi c sBs
tped. and confined by lack Of opportunity.
PshayI With the willi1RsPfSss and sven the de-
It's a good deal OF a come-down to gel, only, an
Introduction to q State Senator or the PresidenO
I might have biiosssonl;od out into a ,pqrlos
lecturer a long while ago, only realized that
trammeTed. You know You Just cannot be e'o-
qusnt over Presidents Of souIless corporations,
a stats s2 sena afoFf from Saa Po SSSf ' Hollow %1t" I've been
trying TO make a meal of private secretaries
f fRS s e Slfe jns9 the to Idq PGia aSd w aRS RRG pTep9s SH %
SSUuished People Whom I Have Not Met
What do You think Of thatH Why. it's 2 per-
s soar ass1 aionS that nf line. Is And n Il then. doS't yoS
tSs nsqRRbEs ay ya2 e or esfve m or S stanlo S"S or aS Srs.
Hqmphry Ward or Queen yictorEta or MARY
see. its ali the same to me. m get them up
whatever, they. want. 1t means, more work.
G Gishesp viii Ru be s9 and how how much mach E sreSteF mi the e" de-
mand will be for my lectures.
subject. ' too. '%n Just th i io WHAT Il MEANS to dis
t Ing Sst PeSSg 9s m saem t6aM three a0W or Rf on4,
Then they are the only ones who are barred
out, Every other distinguished person in the
world and out Of It will be entitled Ito to ny con- m
four who are not eligible because Of my nc
you think / ought 70 strike a rich field ?"
sstMar G ssSj sSs y ys ftss Sia assm to tFsf' your sub
"'"Oh. I've thought it all out, Do you want an
example Choose q name. as the children say.
You can have anybody. Tho catalogue IS q
bright lexicon which reaches all the way from
AtoZ: from Albert Edward. Prince q Wales.
to Johnny 2immernan, Prince, Of ledalIerSI
/. You sec there's room for a whole, squad ~
, lecturers. n could only get my idea COPY
{ riRhted! Well, where shall | bcGinf
UOh, take Albert Edward"
Love our love With an ~, 50 10 speak, Wei.
hero goes: Ladies' and gentlemen. il is scnrce-
! Unnecessary under the cIrTnmStaE@es t. "XElain
ME whom / have not met. Their" have been a
great many occasions when these interesting
encounters did not occur. One OF the most
, notabir Of these failures 10 meet was one win
= ter when the Prince was a. Nice and was
spendinR the winter In California. We wore
v both out OF our latitude and perhaps that pre-
. disposel US 70 have u strong feeling Of sympa-
q NY, One morning when The Prince was wh,E.