The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1898-12-30
THE BREAKER.

place as QUIET people, Lu4OOA6 &ESu I1aUs
Inclined to portliness. As the train moved
On he discussed commonplace subjects
with me in a commonplace way. sheuld
not have been surprised to have been told
that he was a stockbroker or a solicitor,
DIT that he was engaged in the tes trade.
In the course of our chat something hap
pened to be said about curious occupations.
well, p" said my companion, Il do not
suppose that there is any more curious
occupation than my own. am breaker .
He had not at all the appearance of
man used to horses, but I suggested, "a
horse breaker. you mean?"
fsNo, - he said, ''just a plain breaker;
q man who breaks things-breaks any.
thing that requires to be broken; gets his
living by breaking.
I glanced nervously at the cemmuni-
Gator, though he looked even less like
lunatic than he did like horse breaker.
Il see, - he said, smiling, THAT 1 must
explain. When left Cam bridge with a
Classical degree, no prospects and no influ-
ence looked about for a profession.
found everything overcr9w6ed. Besides
none of the professions appealed to me at
all. l like to travel about little, and
enjoy social life. I like talking-taIking
to any one. I hate work of any kind.
This being the case, 1 looked about me to
see if there was not a chance for some new
PROFESSIONAL among our million wants
there was not one that was not supplied.
1.-The idea came to me by accident.
was stopping at my uncle's house when
he received as a present from his wife's
brother a singularly ugly but very valu-
able pair of oriental vases. His wife's
brother was frequently in my unole's
house, and therefore these denominations
had to be displayed. I heard him grun-
bling about this I suggested that he should
sell them. The idea was of course absurd.
10 roll ma IA
break them himself, for his wife's brother
would never forgive him; nor could he
ask his wife to break them, because, al
though he has been married 10 years, he
felt that he did not know her we'll enough;
nor could he ask the servants to break
them, for that would encourage careless
ness and thriftlessness. That is all right,
1 said rose from my place and smashed
the vases one after the other on the floor.
Sorry I was SO clumsy I said. You had
better,ring and have this rubbish cleared
away He rang and told the servant that
I had broken them accidentally. When
she had gone, he said without smile, 1t
seems rather a pity 1 said, I am short
of ready money. Could you lend me esp
He wrote me check for $50 and said that
I was a useful man to know Of. Then
said, Recommend me to your friends, for
already saw the possibility of my future
profession. He mentioned me to some
I had never seen in my life before. They
sent me invitations to their houses, and
they indicated the objects on which I was
to operate. In my first week broke,
remem Der, a lamp shaped like an owl, an
oil painting, q tea service and a dining
room table"
But an oil painting said-"hoW
does one break an oil paintinRY"
1T is simple enough, he said. 81 first
OF all undid the wires SO that the picture
fell, then in picking 1T up 1 put my foot
through the face. 1t was a portrait of my
hosts wife's aunt. 1t was more difficult
to break the dining room table. I recol-
lect that it became necessary for the pur-
pose to invent somewhat boisterous form
of round game. Even then we had to play
it for three evenings before the legs came
of. When I left this house, my host hand
ed me q check and promised to recon-
mend me to other people. I never adver-
I can possibly find time for. If I could
find young man with plenty Of tact, I
would take him as assistant.
1T must need some tact, I suggested.
"It does. It SO often happens that am
employed by the husband without the
knowledge Of the wife, or by the wife
without the knowledge of the husband
Even with the utmost tact one gets oneself
disliked, but that / must put up with.
The other day one of my clients asked me
to come to his house to break a dinner
service. dined there and made myself
as pleasant as I could and told several
good stories. But then 1 also broke the
dinner service, or most OF it, and it was
one to which my hostess was much at
taohed She said to him afterward, I
will never have that brute ia my house
againl' 3"
"And what did he sAyP"
he said: I fully agree with you, my
dear. To the best of my belief the man
was drunk. If he had not been the son Of
an old college friend, should never have
asked him at all That was a little
mean, but then it was necessary for him
to cover himself in some way, and I
never break a dinner service under ego, I
received some solatium for the indignity."
Have you got any engagements at pres
entY'' asked
Yes" he said, st am going to one
now, but it is a trifing thing, requiring
no tact at all. Had 1 had an assistant 1
should have sent him. am to GO the day
after wedding reception when the pres
ents are being packed. Those which from
their ugliness or worthlessness are not
worth packing up and sending to the
bridegroom's distant home have been
placed on a separate shelf 1 shall upset
that shelf and accidentally stamp on any
thing which is not broken in the fall. The
job won't take five minutes, and I get 8
guinsas for f. I am doing it for the
bridegroom without the knowledge Of the
bride. Men begin to deceive women very
coon, find
II have,'' said, zone or two little OBJ
jects in my own home which"
But at tEis moment the train entered
Victoria station, and, though managed
to complete my sentence, and my COM
panion said that he would be glad at any
time to Oblige me, in the confusion Of our
arrival neglected to take his name and
address or to give him mine. barry |