Daily press. [volume] (Newport News, Va.) 1896-current, 1898-12-15
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DRUG MANS DEAF CUSTOMER
ne was deaf-deaf as Il post. and
"heh ne Went into the Washington ave-
l'ue drus store ana laid Il physicians
prescription down on the counter in
,r'i't oi the proprietor he bawled: Hey
nave you got ths?''
The druggist sized up the old ,on,ta
man and his nfirmity at the same time
i'e saved time and his vocal chords by
SHillnE and nodding an affirmative
men put it up said the customer
seating himself upon a stool while the
uruS man retired behind the prescrip-
.i'h case. The druggists junior assist
ant brought the medicine out to the old
gentleman in few minutes ana the
!atter after thrusting the package. deem
do"n INTO his nrercoat pocket made an
ear-tru'npet Of his hand and shouted:
| f:n" :.uch?'
Dollar and ten cents roarcd the iu
niur clerk
Hey? ten cents? Did you saw ten
cents? and the old gentleman lished
out dime. dropped it on the counter
ana hobbltd towards the door.
say. come back here. Dollar ana len
cents. not ten cents. yelled the drug
sists young man. But the old fellow
T, heard him not
I HI hold On there minute" shouted
| tht proprietor in the voice Of a man
hailng II ship two miles distant
The old fellow was opening the door
| nor'. and III" voices Of the men behind
| the counter fell short Of his hearing. AS
2" issued int" the street the Junior
clerk started To follow him
Let the old deaf fool GO said the
boss. let him go. wouldn't undertake
| I" explain his mistake to him for twice
the 'n"n"y. Anyhow we've made nine
| cents profit"
WHY FRANCOIS SENT 1tr.GItI:rs.
Professor l!"atwright the cru,ltc
| president of Richmond College. is not
"hlH n distinguished educator but Il
man OF brilliant parts. MOI the least OF
| his many and varied accomplishments
is his nnctious faculty for story telling.
| n" Professors stories are always en-
tertainlnS and frequently ones that he
can H"urh for, in the case ,,f his
friend. the Et..ntuckiAn. whose cxperi-
| '.nre With a new gardener the Professor
| delights in rccounting.
The kentuckian is a gentleman farm
| .i. Sometime ago he hired n French
man recently landed. to look after the
extensive grounds about his mnnsinn
Francois was landscape gardener Of
excellent taste and skill. The pretty
ana picturesque effects designed by him
boH'ifiii'd the place to that extent that
III" aesthetic soul az the proprietor was
mad" exceedingly glad. He pronounced
t''' Nov gardener a treasure. and be-
| came deeply Interested in his welfare
Francois was deficient only in onr ,hinl,
Ills Knowledge. Of the English ,nn.,.
was Very limited. ana whit. nothing al
f"rd"d HIM more pleasure than plotting
ne Major 5 guests over the state. and
pointing out the various objects of in
t"r@sl that ;lbpilndc,l lr was frequently
"a
hehd the meaning of his jarSon This
defect panied both the Major and the
Francois and they determined To rene
dy it.
Francois was accordingly provided
with suniry dictionaries. ErinInars and
elementary treatiseS and the Major took
upon himself the task of instructinr the
Ear"ener in the language. Shortly after
FRANCOIS began his course in English
TIE Major was crossing the lawn one
morning, reading n book Francois was
pushing Il grass cutter over a Mat near
hS and as the Major approached the
gardener faced him With an expression
Of rrrplexity
Monsieur" said he. you haf tell me
Eat ven hear Re word vich not under
S'and come t" you. For Eat gf YOU
z" many snnks''
Wen, Francois. Gucrird the Major
"hat is the trouble this time?''
rs sing, Monsieur. vat You call him
IN The l.cnSlish polar bear Vat he do
ch"" - -.
The Major laughed You mean to
ASK Francois. what is a polar b@.r?
Isn't thar so?''
10. no, no. | know ze polar bear
Monsieur. vat h" is. but VAT he dc? -
Well. Francois returned the Major
with an amused look, that is something
Of :, sticker. The polar bear? What
docs he do? Let me see now The 20
lar bear Yes, the polar bear sits on tho
leland he eats fish"
me ghrdcnc. threw up both hands
SITS on ~ cr? he exclaimed sits
on ~ ice and eats fish, Parbleu, will
not go"
go whcrc?" demanded the Major
taken ahack ut the Frenchman's intense
perturbation.
Monster answered the excited gard
cner. Il know not ze customs Of zis
country | haf 81! my promecsc Eat
be vnn polar bear at re funeral Of re
friend. but cannot sit on &c ice ana
Diet, ST fish
TIN, tt-0NrE,JyJ,