The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1898-01-27

SOG ClIcu OIL IL ny All ny, an plchlu1 up
that beeskip under one arm, away he
went with it OH the double-quick lords
the turnip patch yender. My wife's the
fur-seein'est woman there is in all the
borderin' counties, an she says:
''Pimley,' she says, ''we won't have
no honey for our buckwhit cakes this
winter. she says. IS
II knowed in my heart Samantha was
right, but, bein' the oncommittin'est
man myself there is 'twixt Dutch Forks
an Biler's Crossin', says:
Samantha" says, mot bein' per-
sonally acquainted with bear an their
natur', can't say" says.
"But the bear KEEP right on, an me
an Samantha follered him, serenadin'
him with the milk pan an chuckin'
stones at him. Wen he got to the place
in the field yender that you kin see it
youstand on the fence the bear stopped.
He sot down, an with a swat an a
swoop he scattered that beeskip to the
winds an then scooped up the honey
an went on his way eatin' of it an
smackin' his lips till he got into the
woods down yender, an we lost him.
My wife's the philosophizinest woman
that ever see the sun git up. An she
says:
"'"Pimley," she says, IF we can't
have honey for our buckwhit cakes we
kin have lasses," she says.
"'Which there wasn't no denyin' of,
an bein' the agreein'est man myself
that ever voted for the last man that
asked him, I says:
"'"So we kin, Samantha" I says.
$50 we kim
Samantha went back to her house
work, an I mogged for the buckwhit
| field. Next day at dinner time was
washin' up an Benny he came in from
! school. Benny bein' the sniffin'est an
nose :wipin'est boy that ever 'peared to
think that sleeves must a been made be-
fore kan'kerchiefs, it was quite spell
| fore he got out what he had to say, but
when he did git it out it was this:
"'"Pap," says he, ''the bears come
back, an is playin' mumble-je-peg with
the turnips.'
Get looked out O. the door, an sure
enough, there was the bear down in the
turnip field yender, not fur from where
he had harvested our honey crop, pull
in up turnips, eatin' some, skitterin'
more around the field, but always pull
in up fresh lot, till see that if he
| wasn't fetched up in his career tol'able
sudden we wouldn't have no more tur-
| nips for winterin' over on than we had
honey fer buckwhit cakes. hollered
| for Samantha, an she bein' the sot-
finest in her way woman there is 'twixt
the West Branch and Huckleberry Hill,
grabbed the milk pan an the 'tater
masher, an hollerin' fer me to git the
AK, an for Benny to run to Howser's.
down yender, fer a gun, she dashed
lords the turnip field, soundin' the milk
pan enough to set a circ'lar sawmill
hand def. I grabbed the ak, an Ben
| ny run to Howser's. The bear didn't
pear as if he seen us marchin' on him
in battle array at all, an KEEP on pullin'
up an chuczin' down turnips as if they
want part O. the mainstay O. life in
these parts O. the hemlock belt. We got
as nigh as couple O. rod of him, when
he riz up with snort that skeert Sa-
mantha so that she dropped the milk
pan, an me SO dropped the Ak, an
both of us so that we turned tail an dug
for the house.
We got there, shet ourselves in, an
looked back out o. the winder. The
bear had stopped where the milk pan
laid. He pranced round it an round
it, like an Injun dancin' his war dance.
Then he turned it bottom up, an
dropped kerchunk down on it with
both fore feet. Then he picked it up,
| an Samantha didn't need to be the fur
seein'est woman 'twixt the two rivers
to see that*it wouldn't never be worth
cent for holdin' milk ag'in.
"That pan seemed to tickle the bear
more than the beeskip had. He tossed
it, an he kicked it, an he jumped On it
till it had more corners on it than
| there's prickers on chestnut burr.
When he couldn't hammer no more
kinks in it he left it, an staggered
straight for the house. When Saman-
tina breathes hard she never says much,
but she up an does. I had heerd her
breathe hard, an knowed her to up an
do lots O. times, but never heerd her
breathin' have quite setch an edge on
it as it had as she seen that milk pan O.
! hern bein' trifed with by that bear, an
the bear then comm to the house
lookin' for more fun. The bar come up
and stuck his nose ag'in the winder an
snorted at us. Samantha had a dipper
| O. soft soap standin' on the bench. She
took it up. She riz the winder, an
fore the bear got over his s'prise she
s1ashed that soap plumb in his face.
BE tumbled back an he yooped an he
hollered. He couldn't see which wav
to go, an he jest rolled and how1ed,
Jest what would "a come to that bear
at the hands o. Samantha, for she was
breathin' harder'n ever, if Benny hadn't
got back jest then with Howser an his
gun, never kin begin to tell. Howser
put bullet in the, bear, an he won't
never have no more fun with nobody.
My wife's the suddenest woman to grab
situation there is from Monkey Run
to Ceres Junction, an as soon as she
quit breathin' hard after that bear give
up the ghost she says:
"Pimley," she says, "there amt
nothin' so good on buckwhit pancakes
as bear meat gravy-not even honey"
she says.
"'1'm goin' to town tomorrow to git
new milk pan,' concluded Mr.. Pimley.
AM while there I'm also goin', to git a
gun. I find they're farmin' emple-