Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1898-02-10
A STAGE KISS,
It Had to 30 Given Even at the Risk Of
Bloodshed.

It Had to BE Given Even at the Risk Of
Bloodshed.
1t was a home talent show, and
we sat patiently waiting for the I'M
expected to happen. The unexpect-
ed always happens with home tai
ent show, and an inner mountain
village is not proof against this long
accepted stage fact. We strangers
from the unregenerate east who
were there in the mountains for our
health s sake felt assured, therefore,
of an experience before the night
should be over.
1t was 1.-THE Mikado' which was
to be presented, tattered and torn
by it's transit from first class thea
tiers in the east to the town hall of
Teton City. We had heard Nanki
Poo as he had sung about being a
thing of shreds and patches, and we
had heard 10 Kos announcement
Of his theories and ideas and were
getting along fairly well in our lis
tening when the kissing song was
reached. Then Red Pete Barker,
who was singing Nanki Poo, adj
vanced to the footlights.
Ladies and gentlemen, the tenor
singer began, 'tthis is mighty poor
place in the show to interrupt the
proceedings to make a speech, but
as certain things are about to nap
pen think it is only fair that you
be put on. l have heard that Holy
Moses Perkins, who is known and
generally hailed and greeted as the
eventual husband of Miss Betty
Hoyler, who is taking the part of
Yum Yum, has announced to all
concerned that if / followed out the
directions of the book of this play
and insist on kissing the lady there
will be five different kinds of trou-
BILE. / hereby announce that am
going to begin kissing the young
lady in about three minutes and
shall keep right on kissing her
through the whole blamed song,
and I further announce that shall
do that kissing in full view of the
audience. Moreover, it may be Of
interest to you to know that have
secreted in these long and flowing
robes two first rate six shooters
right ready for business. am also
armed with the fact that Holy Moses
Perkins is sitting in seat No. 1877,
which is in plain view from the
stage. AS the scene which is about
to be presented is cross between a
delicious love song and a homicide
and as / shall caress the young
woman with one eye on her beau
teous charms and the other on seat
No. 1877 | hope you will overlook
any little shortcomings in the affair.
hate to mention such low, coarse
things, but the gun which I shall
use first is a self cocker and has
been recently oiled. Thanking you
for your kind attention, the show
will now go on.
We listened to the rendition Of the
kiss-kiss song with great interest, es-
peclally those who were in range of
seat No. 1877. Nothing happened,
however, Mr.. Perkins remaining
statuesquely mute. But when the
applause continued onsits demand
for an encore Mr.. Barker appeared
once more at the stage front.
THANK you,' he said, for this
vindication, but if you want some
more of it am compelled to say
you can't have it. ] respect Nh.
Perkins claims on the premises.
Thank you one and all, and especial
~ Mr.. Perkins, who has this night
sacrificed his feelings for the ad-
vancement of art. The show will
now proceed"
We then leaned back and listened
respectfully while Pooh Bah told
about his troubles and his expecta-
tions. Chicago Record.
Is .