New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1898-12-22
THE TALK OF TIE DAY.

Here's piece Of country journalism" says The
PHILADELPHIA Press which It will he hard to equal.
Il actually appeared. not very long ago In the
columns OF n far-away little daily giving a de-
scrption of drug store: The floor said the
article is covered with linoleum. having tile ef-
feet The opening is and for this occasion
flowers potted tropical plants and ferns add beauty
to the room Mr.. A, the proprietor has been In
our midst for period of fourteen years. His es-
tabllshment has always maintained reputation
equal to (sic) and that Will be the aim OF
the future. Prescriptions carefully compound
ed with pure and fresh medicines That paragraph.
first intimated. is itself certainly equal to
none unless 1t be the criticism of an actor in
Samson and Deliah.' credited TO the same paper.
This said. Mentally and physically, Mr.. Blank is
Samson"
The sands OF Margate are indirectly responsible
he nhotorrnnhed hy one Of the itjnerant beach
dends when one of the olive branches in fear per-
pursuit. The chase waxed long. for the urchin was
blessed with sturdy legs and the mothers skirts
indulgent to a fault at holiday time lost patience,
or perhaps he was reminded by the photographer
ira coppers. ,'Urry up with the npper, Maria
Ere's the boke a-waitn' with the chimera"'-
(Cornhi Magazine.
writer IN Tho Forester" says: Valuable
characteristics are noted OF willow. growing spon-
taneously along the Missouri River from the mouth
of the Great NAmaha south 10 the Yellowstone
north Familiarity known as diamond willow. Pro
fessor Sargent names It Salx cordata vesta En-
perience demonstrates II as durable almost for
underground uses posts. ETC., as red cedar. North
ern Indians seem % have known Of its valuable
characteristics. They call It twat.' which. inter-
preted. signifies durable. 1t grows readily from
cuttings, either in its natural home the bottom
lands. out the high upland prairies"
This Is the paror. eh?' tentatively remarked
the agent who was looking oyer the house ALI
YES" replied old man kidder. but usually call
It the courtroom-Tve got seven daughters, you
know"-(Boston Journal
The Philadelphia Record" tells Of an old Penn
sylvania farmer who recently came into possession
OF a check for $500. 1t caused him great deal OF
anxiety and for long time he could not muster
I'D the courage to have 1t cashed Finally, while
a trip to town, he summoned up nerve enough
and, strolling into the bank presented tho check
The teller glanced II hastily and then, after tho
fashion Of his kind brusquely asked: What de-
nomination." Lutheran gol durn IT, But what's
tibet got tew do with it, brusquely replied the
old farmer to the great astonshment of the bank
official. II required several minutes explanation
before the teller could get the old man TO under
stand his question. and then the latter took his
money and departed with sundry growls deroga-
tory banks In general.
Uncle Joshs Theo,y.-Nephew 0rom the city,
Why do you haye those nn vS know Gm y1SSe
theory that they afford protection has long since
been exploded?
Uncle Josh--Wall | kin tell you they dew act
perteckters. thcry or no the'ry. ,.,,.
Nephew-Do you mean 10 tell me you peheve they
protect you from lightning?
Uncle oshMebby not young 'un: meb IS, not
but they perteckt me rum them pesky hghtnin
rod peders.-(Chicago News
"The Nashville Banner" says that petition In
bankruptcy recently filed In Nashville probably
has equal in the country In the way or liaoity'
which Is confined TO the item Of alImony due a
divorced wife. 1t was filed by Gentry X. Smith. OF
Murfreesboro. who forth that his liabilities are
g no. due Mrs l.. A. Fits, OF Enon College. nee
Mrs. l.. A. Smith," Incidentally. may remark.
Mrs. Fits. who born Mrs. Smith. must be
remarkable
Questions OF Values-Iie knew that she
clever business woman and therefore he thought
she was a good judge of values.
Il have made bet that Will marry you.' he
Money up" she asked;
Yes" he answered. pleased at the buslnesslike
way. she took hold of the proposition
Five hundred dollars"
She looked him over critically.
TOO low. she said at last. "Your have to get
II raised to 5000 or you'll lose
And at that, she afterward explained. she was
giving him bargain-day pricc-(Chicago Post
The difficulties OF voting at sea are thus de-
scrbed by soldier In "A Kansas regiment; The
voting place established first In little room
on the middle deck. but the ships cook soon routed
MS out as II happened to be a messroom was
watching the proceedings consequently was called
on to help move the books ballots. etc; first out
on deck where the election was conducted for n
few minutes from the heads OF some convenient
barrels thence TO chest on the hurricane deck In
the PROV OF the boat, and finally to a stateroom.
where the election completed. BY this time a
good many OF the men were too sick TO vote. and
since then the Judges and clerks have been too sick
TO count the ballots"
Haucinaton Just hear Hawkins yelling every
few minutes TINT he - gentleman VIII you,
Yes. He has said that so often that no almost
hcllnYos II ulmaclf II Cincinnati EnQulrer.