St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1898-02-26

Ife tufnfp patcn yenuef. MY WlIc tHe
woman there is in all the
borderin' counties, an she says:
"'"Pimley," she says, I'VE won't have
no honey for our buckwhit cakes this
winter" she says.
Il knowed in my heart Samantha was
right, but. bein' the oncommittin'est
man myself there is 'twiNt Dutch Forks
an Biler's Crossin', / says:
g. Samantha" says, mot bein' per-
sonally acquainted with bear an their
natur', / can't say" says.
But the bear KEEP right on, an me
an Samantha follered him, serenadin'
him with the milk pan an chuckln'
stones at him. Wen he got TO the place
in the field yender that you kin see II
YOU stand on the fence the bear stopped.
lie sot down, an with a swat an a
swoop he scattered that beeskip to the
winds an then scooped up the honey
an went on his way eatin' of it an
smackin' his lips till he got into the
woods down yender. an we lost him.
Nv wife's the philosophizinest woman
that ever see the sun git up. An she
says: :.
.."Pimley,' she says, IF we cant
have honey for our buckwhit cakes we
kin have lasses," she says.
(which there wasn't no denyin' OF.
an / bein' the agreein'est man myself
that ever voted for the last man that
asked him saws:
"'"So we kin, Samantha" l says.
$50 we kim"
".Samantha went back to her house
work, an l mogged for the buckwhit
field. Next day at dinner time was
washin' up an Benny he came in from
school. Benny bein' the sniffin'est an
nose-wipin'est boy that ever 'peared TO
think that sleeves must been made be-
fore han'kerchiefs. it was quite spell
fore he got out what he had TO say, but
when he did git it out it was this:
""Pap," says he. "the bears come
back. an is piayin' mumble-Je-peg with
the turnips."
"I looked out o. the door. an sure
enough. there was the bear down In the
turnip field yender. not fur from where
he had harvested our honey crop. pull
in up tmrnips. eatin' some. sklftern
more around the field. but always pull
in up a fresh lot. till see that il ne
wasn't fetched up in his career tolabie
sudden we wouldn't have no more tur-
nips for winterin' over on than we had
honey fer buckwhit cakes. l hollered
for Samantha. an she bein' the sot-
finest in her way woman there is 'twiNt
the West Branch and Huckleberry Hill,
grabbed the milk pan an the 'tater
masher. an hollerin' fer me to git the
ak, an for Benny to run to Howser's.
down yender. fer gun, she dashed
lords the turnip field, soundin' the milk
pan enough to set circ'lar sawmill
hand deef. / grabbed the ak. an Ben
nv run to Howser's. The bear didn',
pear as If he seen us marchin' on him
IN battle array at all, an KEEP on puilin'
up an chuckin' down turnips as if they
want part o. the mainstay o life id
these parts o. the hemlock belt. We got
as nigh as couple o rod of him. wheE
he riz up with snort that skeert Sa.
mantha SO that she dropped the milk
pan, an me so dropped the ak, an
both Of us so that we turned tail an dug
for the house.
1--WE got there, shet ourselves in, an
looked back out o. the winder. The
bear had stopped where the milk par
laid. He pranced round it an round
it. like an Injun dancin' his war dance
Then he turned it bottom up, an
dropped kerchunk down on it with
both fore feet. Then he picked it up
an Samantha didn't need to be the fnr
seein'est woman 'twixt the two rivers
to see that it wouldn't never be worth
a cent for holdin' milk ag'in.
"'That pan seemed to tickle the bea1
more than the beeskip had. He tossed
it, an he kicked it, an he jumped on il
till it had more corners on it thar
there's prickers on chestnut burr
When he couldn't hammer no more
kinks in it he left it, an staggered
straight for the house. When Saman
tha breathes hard she never says much
but she up an does. had heerd hel
breathe hard. an knowed her to up an
do lots o times, but never heerd hel
breathin' have quite setch an edge OF
it as it had as she seen that milk pan o
hern bein' trifled with by that bear, an
the bear then comm to the hous'
lookin' for more fun. The bar come vi
and stuck his nose ag'in the winder an
snorted at u.s. Samantha had a dippel
O. soft soap standin' on the bench. Sh'
took it up. She riz the winder, an
fore the bear got over his s'prise sh'
slashed that soap plumb in his face
He tumbled back an he yooped an b,
hollered. He couldn't see which wa,
to go. an he jest rolled and howled
jest what would "a come to that bea
at the.h hands o. Samantha. for she wa
breathin' harder'n ever. il Benny hadn'
got back jest then with Howser an hi
gun. never kin begin to tell. Howse
put bullet in the bear. an he won
never have no more fun with nobody
Nv wife's the suddenest woman to gral
situation there is from Monkey Rul
to Ceres Junction. an as soon as sh
quit breathin' hard after that bear Civ
up the ghost she says:
"Pimley." she says. ''there ain
nothin' so good on buckwhit pancake
as bear meat gravy-not even honey.
she says.
"'rm goin' to town tomorrow to gi
a new milk pan. concluded Mr.. Pimley
AN while there Tn also goin' to git
gun. / find they're farmin' emple
ment in this part o the hemlock bel
that's usefuller than your plough al
harrow. A plaguey sight, accordin' t
my idee-and Saman,ha's.' IN. ]
Sun.
A Frank Av0yval.
"Well. young man." said a prosecu,
ing attorney, Il see that you have uT
dertaken the practice of law in carr
est"
.Yes," replied the barrister. who ha