Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1898-04-06
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window already.-Tit-Bts.
What do you think of woman S
rghts?' 81 think" replied the shoe
clerk, that they ought to match WON
ans lefts Chicago Post.
! Patlence-What Is the cheapestlook-
ing thing you ever saw about bargain
! counter? Patricia husband waiting
| for his wife-Yonkers Statesman.
Magistrate-The evidence shows that
you threw q stone at the man. Mrs.
McDuff-An' 1t shows more than that,
yer honor 1t shows that | hit him.
Mabel-You should see the French
Count who is dancing attendance upon
me. Susie-Ah French dancing mas
ter, dear?-Philadelph North Ameri-
can.
Charles Bragg-Yes, Miss Brightly,
1t costs me ten thousand dollars year
to live. Miss Blightly-Oh, Mr.. Bragg,
do you think it's worth it?-Boston
Traveller.
Ledgerby-It does seem good to see
old Daybuke back at his desk after his
long illness. Bilfile-You bet 1t does
I was afraid it was another case Of 81
all round for floral tribute.-Chicago
Journal.
81 have n doctors certificate here
that l cannot sing tonight" said the
prima donna. what" roared the
manager; 'T'll give you certificate
that you never could sing."-Detroit
Free Press.
Mrs. Wabash-Mrs. Lakeside Is 60
ing to celebrate his golden wedding
next week. Mrs. Naturalization don't
say SO. Mrs. Wabash-Yes; she will
then have been married fifty times
Town Topics.
Ethel-Isn't 1t strange that Flosse
attracts such intellectual men? Maud
| Oh, no; she told me she always planned
her gowns when they talk to her, and
that gives her face that interested ex-
pression.-Harper's Bazaar.
do you really mean to stand by
what you say about retiring from pub
lie life;" inquired the intimate friend
just before an election. How do
know!' responded the politician; 'I'm
no Observation-Disclosures Star.
! Miss Thirtysmith (meaningly)-An
Italian proverb says that 'honest men
marry soon," and Jack Swift (sol-
emnly)-I can not conceal 1t any long
or; live in deadly fear of being at any
moment arrested for embezzlement.-
Puck.
Il don't know which Is worse" NUT
/ tered young Blunderheads at the swell
reception, retreating to corner and
wiping his perspiring brow; "but be-
lleve [ would rather be run over by a
! train than to step on one.'-Chicago
| Tribune.
"Did you ever 60 into a dark room,
where you couldn't see any one, and
yet something seemed to tell you there
was some one there?" asked the spiritu
alistic medium. "Oh, yes" replied the
man; II used to have that experience
often, In my counting days."-Yonkers
| Statesman.
Blupderly Cooking at female por-
trait)-Great gracious! What hideous
face. Where did you find that sitter?
Artist (coldly)-That, sir, Is portrait
of my sister. Blunderly-I beg your
pardon. My mistake, I'm sure, After
all, ought to have noticed the family
esemblance.-Tit-B
Magistrate-You were drunk, Of
course, when the hold-up men went
through you? Battered-up prisoner-l
was, your honor. Magistrate-They got
everything you had, suppose? Batter
ed-up prlsoner-Everything, your hon
or, except a two-dollar bill had in my
watch pocket. Magistrate-The fine
Chicago Tribune.
81 do SO enjoy being at sea- away out
Of sight of land" said the ingenue. at
Is romantic" assented the soubrette. II
hadn't thought Of that. But when l
look all around and see the horizon at
the same distance everywhere, there
comes over me delightful sensation of
occupying the center Of the STAGE
Indianapolis Journal.
First shade-What ails that hump
shou,dered fellow that just arrived last
week? rarely see him at his seat late
ly. Second shade--Hc claims to have
been bicycle crank while on earth;
but wha. that may have been l know
not. At any rate, he has constructed
very peculiar machine with a couple
Of old halos.-Puck.
of course, sir, need scarcely say,
in giving you my daughter, that ex.
pect her to be surrounded with all the
luxurles to which she has been accus-
toned Certainly, sir. If l had any
preference for a nome Of our own, l
would feel constrained to yield it. Your
wish, sir, is law with me."-Detro!t
Journal.
Jack Fiarce-It was a great surprise
to me to learn that you had invited
YOur npiphbOrs tho Flo tpuroao 20 n,..