Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1898-11-26
DON'T BORROW TROUBLE" BUY
IT'S CHEAPER IN TIE END
SAPOI-lQ
Saturday and Sunday Prices or
Baked Beans, Boston Plum BroWnDread.
10c cents.
CITY BAKERY, Augusta.

1t is very clear that we can not spend
the rest of our lives speaking to each
other through the medium of black
cat. In despair / again consult my
| club friend, Major Allerdice.
Poison the cat" he says laconically.
That will make your wife speak"
For day l hesitate, but the brute
seems to have sinister power over
my wife. There he sits purring and
blinking while Mary chatters to him.
making little hits at me, and evidently
has no intention of falling on my
bosom and weeping tears of penitence
as wife ought to do. She cuddles
Lord Salisbury and lays his great
black head on her pretty white neck.
and tells him with a glance at me from
under her fashes that she has ordered
a rational costume like Mrs. Deane
Mosleys.
My mind is made up. Dinner over, +
tell the cat that / am going to the
club. l knew Mary would rise to that.
Poor Puss! she says. Il wish 1
could take you to that lecture on ethics
tonight
The ethics have sealed Lord Sails
bury's doom. go straight to q chemist
and demand an ounce of arsenic. Per-
haps I look wild; the chemist refuses.
l try three without success, but obtain
what 1 want at a fourth on giving my
name and address, and send the fol-
lowing telegram to Allerdice: ''Will
| make an attempt to poison Lord
Salisbury tonight
1t is done, the arsenic is artfully
mixed in chicken outlet, and poor
! Lord Salisbury is preparing to take his
last meal.
For day I forbore, hoping Mary
would relent and apologize-but in
vain. She is more defiant than ever SO
the black cat must pay the price. She
is sure to cry then, and will forgive
her.
Lord Salisbury has taken the outlet
off the plate on to the carpet. That
knock saves the cats life. Jane, the
maid, with face of ashes and her eyes
jumping out of her head. appears.
There are two policemen to see
you, SIR
To see me? am not a magistrate
what can they want? know only too
soon when find myself arrested for a
supposed attempt on the life of the
prime minister.
much more, to have Mary come, as she
comes now, her face all pleading and
terrified, and in spite Of the inspector
of police puts both her soft arms round
my neck, and they would be bold men
who would attempt to take me from
that sweet stronghold.
And it is Mary who guesses the
idiotic mistake. 1t is my clumsy at
tempt to poison Lord Salisbury that
has put me in this awkward position.
My telegram to Allerdice had been
promptly forwarded to the authorities.
The four chemists had sworn to my
wild appearance and trying to pur-
chase arsenic. 1t is as plain as noon
day.
1t is not pleasant to have been mis-
taken for a lunatic, and Mary UNI
doubtedly, shows great presence of
mind. First she rescues the chicken
outlet. partly to save the cat and part
ly to assure the police, and with her
lovely eyes full of confusion she tells
the police inspector the whole story of
our foolish quarrel: and have never
felt so small in my life.
When they are all gone Mary turns
to me sweetly.
my poor old boy! Why didn't you
say you were sorry at once? 1t would
have saved all this trouble
Somehow I think it is l who do the
apologizing, after all. l know
avoided Allerdice for some time and
bought a very smart collar for Lord
Salisbury.