Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1898-02-10


could like him so much better if he
didn't want 10 marry me.
| have always found it extremely
unpleasant being made love TO by q
man to whom l was Indifferent. l
daresay it wouldn't be the same if il
were anyone l cared for. Some girls
are so happy when they are engaged,
but | am sure | should be quite the
contrary if were engaged to VIII.
Feb. Is. have had long talk with
mother. She is delighted that Will
has proposed, and seems to think there
can be no question as to my accept
ing him. She kissed me, and said
was very fortunate, and that she
I knew of no young man whom she
should prefer for a son-in-law When
I told her how l felt towards him
and that when l thought of marrying
him l liked him less than ever before.
| she tried to laugh, and said that was
nature, that it was just a girl's shy
ness, and would wear off, and that shu
was sure l would look at it sensibly,
and that we should be very happy to-
gether. She did net like my asking
for three days to think it over in. She
said after the length of time Will
and | had known. one another, it was
quite unnecessary. When one thinks
o. it in that way, it seems as if she
were right, but l have felt different
about some things of late.
Ida came in yesterday afternoon and
We had such nice visit talking over
our school days and everything, and
she said she had never regretted mar
rying a poor man, and that she loved
her husband more than the day she
married him, partly, she believes, be-
cause they had been through such
hard times together. Her husband is
quite a friend of George Farmers
They were in college together, and he
says that he is a fine fellow" l al
ways think so much of a mans
Judgment of another man. Ida said
that George Farmer was a great ad-
mirer of mine. l wondered just what
| she meant, but Of course couldn't ask
| always enjoy visit with Ida, and
mean to see more Of her. 1 like hen
| husband too.
Feb. IA. This has been the most
eventful day of my life. l got UP
this morning feeling nervous and de-
pressed to the last degree. Will was
coming for his answer tonight, and
I couldn't decide what to say to him,
for mother wouldn't hear of my re-
fusing him, and told me it would be
unkind and dishonorable after the
way in which | had encouraged him,
adding that sentiment was all very
well, but it wouldn't pay the grocer,
aid the dressmaker, and that a daugh-
ter ought to take the advice of one
who was so much older than herself,
with the advantage of years of ex-
perience, and who had her child's best
interests at heart.
The idea that [ had encouraged Will
did not trouble me, for he had fiirted
with half the girls in town, and
never thought he was serious till the
last minute.
Then mother reminded me that it
was two years since | had had an Of
fer, and that l was nearly thirty, and
it was time | was settled, and this
was the only prospect had at present,
unless | was waiting for George
Washington Farmer to make up his
mind whether he wanted me or not,
and that she had heard about my sit
ting out dances with him and probably
everyone else had, and that she didn't
doubt the man himself thought he
could have me for the asking.
l ought to have known what mother
said it for. l really did know but it
was dreadful to think he might have
suspected anything, or that people had
been talking, and [ cried and told
mother that / didn't care anything
for George Farmer, and she knew it,
and everyone knew it and then as J
said it all in a moment it came over
me that [ did care for him and that
was why l couldn't bear the thought
of marrying Will 1 was afraid he
knew it and l felt that | would rather
die than have him know it. Mother
said anyone could see that he was only
gratifying his vanity at my expense,
as any man would be tempted too who
saw a girl look and act the way :.
looked and acted whenever he came
near me. She asked me quite sharply
if he had ever said anything" to me,
and when I said, mo-" replied very
significantly that she had supposed
not.
was never in my life so ashamed
and unhappy and yet, as l thought it
over, did not believe what mother
said about his amusing himself at my
expense. He was incapable of that;
probably he was sorry for me, and l
felt as if could not endure his pity
1 who had always been so sure of my
self until now I had not thought
him Indifferent, but mother could read
human nature, she knew better than
I. Had I not betrayed myself to her
before I understood by own feelings?
The moment of my humiliation and
despair was her opportunity. She
told me not to cry, that whatever any
one might suspect, all tongues would
be silenced by the announcement of
my engagement to Will Wilson, and
that I must battle my eyes and try to
get some rest before Will came for his
answer. | was thankful to escape to
my room to cry by myself, and when
| caught a glimpse of my face in the
glass l looked a perfect fright. l
didn't care, nothing seemed to matter