The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1898-09-08

between New Orleans on Lake Erie
and Cleveland on the Gulf of Mexico,
we would think it funny, too.
Nv
An Iowa paper wants to know what
the reward of Mark Hanna should be-
for his part in the late unpleasantness.
How would it be to try dose of Mime
sofa "reformatory plan" on him.
*
The most terrible lot of backsliding
in the history of the country is now
going on. All the recently converted
yachts and cruisers are relapsing into
their former ways.
The value of the annual plum rop
in France is 100000, not counting
Anna Gould and other imported fruit.
~
Admiral Cervera, on being asked by
a gushing Boston lady what particular
part of the American navy impressed
him most strongly, replied: MADAM, l
am forced to acknowledge that those
eight-inch shells of the Brooklyn made
a very deep impression"
Xxx
A California man saw a wildcat en-
ter shed and went in and fired at it.
but hit instead a job lot of dynamite.
When he came to be reckoned it must
have been mOuntain-liOn.
Xxx
Minnesota's Twelfth and Fourteenth
will now proceed to lick the internal
revenue into shape. They will all have
chance to lick stamps, even though there
were not enough Spaniards to 60
around.
Xxx
1t is question whether the return
ing volunteers or the returning KlOn-
dikers have the worst hard luck story
to tell.
Xxx
Admiral Montijo says in his report:
81 was not taken by surprise" No,
the surprise was an afterthought, as it
were.
Xxx
Col. Patty de Clam is beginning to
feel little clamy around the gills, and
Major Esterhazy thinks that the future
looks extremely hazy.
Xxx
The high military gentlemen of
France are very much disposed to treat
the Henry scandal "as an incident"
Xxx
A Missouri man stole his neighbors
trousers and got six years. He did not
take the suspenders. If he had he
would have been hung.
Xxx
would like to bet little even money
that bank wrecker Todd never comes
here.
Xxx
10 fail is human, but to confess is
idiotic.
Xxx
1t is asserted that the Spaniards are
so unsuccessful in war that they can't
beat anything-not even retreat.
~
An editor down in Kansas rakes up.
the old scandal about Adam and Eve
not being married by regularly Or
dained minister. 1t seems to me he is
lacking in proper family pride.
Xxx
Some of the daily newspaper owners
are lying awake nights trying to think
what to do with the boId-face circula-
ton statements which are running at
the head of their editorial column. 1t
is even limited that figures have taken
to lying since the ending of the war.
*~*
We have had lots of visitors who
have registered this week, but as the
cap ms are run short and we don't
want to offend by referring to them
as mr.. and mrs. we will postpone them
until next week.
*
1t is said the sugar trust has lost
nearly nine million dollars by the Hav-
emeyer Arbuckle fight, but it is still
able to pay IL per cent on its capital.
stock.
x"x
The string were mostly thorOughbreds
And Dewey led the van.
horse that never baked or swerved,
Though riderless he ran.
Then there was Schley and Sampson,
A gallant pair of grays,
Who made pretty run for place
Though checked by 'board" delays.
Bill Shafter carried overweight;
And handsome Ganaral Miles