New-York tribune., 1898-01-29
THE TALK or THE DAY.

The Red Ribbon Club. OF Lincoln, Neb. has unani-
mousy resolved that the recent dinner OF the
Princeton alumni in this city has filed II with
righteous revulsion. chagrin. horror and disgust
and it declares that President Patton and Professor
Shields are Conspicuous dcbauchers Of the public
and private conscience of our beloved America" A
dinner which MI people nearly two thousand
miles distant with anything however unsatsfac-
tory. must have y-ry filling qualities
out OF the Question -"Wouldnt Your Majesty
Ike 70 take out Some life insurance. Respectfully
asked the agent, on being admitted 10 the royii
Il can't afford it," replied King Solomon rs
about all can do TO look after my iamhy "n"e
Waving his hand to signify that the Interview was
his steward to To- provide 55o Porterhouse STEAKS ard
family dinner.-fChicago Tribune.
The Cory Penn) News" thus describes a new
social function: The wednesday Afternoon En-
broidery Club met with a member yesterday after
noon and enjoyed a hobo tea Each lady was
given a tin plate, tin cup tin spoon ana req
bandanna handkerchief Retro hments were served
In paper sacks Coffee handed around In od
toma,o-cans, with cream and sugar IN sard'ne ana
salmon cans"
Ahead o: Him Quiet Parry (enersine from i,1,. tron'
door of Daily Terror" oificeDWha Is the trouble.
my friend?
ff;xcitabie Party 1crumbng copy o. "Daiy Ter
quiet Plrty-It isn't necessary I've stopped II.
I'm the Sheriff. 'hlc1gO tribune
\ bill FOR tho determination Of rabld dogs intro
duced IN the Florida Legislature was defeated by
representative from Polk County who sad that
for his part he had the ocst rabbi; dog in Florida.
and any man-it # was the Governor himself-who
tried 10 Kill his rabbit dog would find he had the
biggest fight on his hands that he had ever 80, Into
He sat down amid long and continuous applause.
Making the Rules-"You know" said the Chinese
Emperor 'poss.ss IS nine poHts Of the law
must remind you that there several hundred
points in the game We are playing N!ne RoInts
represent mere bagatele In The score -'"ash-
ington Star
In reply 10 subscriber. the Democratic "Kinder-
hook Rough Notes" says III Mr. Bryan is renom-
mated by the Democrats and this paper remains
under It's present management. Il Will support him
TO the best Of It's ability. regular nomination by
a Democratic convention is all that Is necessary TO
secure the support Of The Rough Notes 1t Is noi
a nuswump newspaper" That Is 10 say. The
Rough Notes" prefers party principle in order
to prove Itself no; a muswump
Really shameful-He-I have been bothered all
through the day Wi,h collectors coming and want
ing money for the foolish frippery You !maeine you
have 10 wear. You ought 10 he ashamed of your
she-You are the one who ought TO be ash ashamed
of yourself Why don't You pay your hills?-nn-
danapolis journal
Gladstone himself is lightweight year older
than Pope Leo and Lord Gwydyr and three years
older than Sir George Gray. DR.. Samuel Smiles and
Mr. Henry Russell Sir Henry Besscmer and Verdi
arc eShty-four Lady Buriett-Coutts and Lord
Cranbrook eighty-three Bismarck is eghty-two and
Sir Charles Gavan Duffy eighty-one. Mr.. Gladstone
is the oldest OF Brita!ns Prime Ministers for TWO
centuries. and the oldest ex-Prime Minister In Eu-
rore.
We sympathze with the converted Jew who has
been told that ne must eat pork a testimony that
he is real Christian. and who publishes his pro-
in the leading poem Of n Jewish Christian
magazine 1t begins:
oh must we eat the flesh Of swine
Because Lord Jesus We are thne?'
II is not at all necessary -Gniependent.