The Providence news. (Providence [R.I.]) 1891-1906, 1898-12-16
BILL WAS APPROVED.
Colonel Dissatisfied and Bowser Ex-
peCted 10 Lose Job.
Little Difficulty Ended Happily With Order
For Whisky Straight

"A Domestic Cyclone" at keith's, was
| one Of the party. Bowser takes great
| interest i'm the affairs of the day and
| shows quite a knowledge OF political
matters. When this was remarked on
| by one Of the party. Bowser replied;
We'll, you See boys, as a youngster
i was destined for a political career
My father was quite ward politician
and knew thing OF two about pullii
the wires. Naturally, l was ambitious
10 follow in his footsteps, and that am
bition led TO little incident which
don't think IL will do any harm to tell,
as the administration has passed away
MY fathers political rival, but
great friend of the family, Col. X, was
up for congress, and, after most ex-
citing campaign, was elected. When
the colonels election was assured,
thought my time had come for further
ing my own projects, and i waited on
him with n request To be taken To
Washington as private secretary
His first question was: Young man,
did your father send you2' No, colo
nel.' replied my father knows moth
ing OF my request, and probably would
frown upon IL If he did We held a
! confab en- the subject and l was for
tunate enough TO persuade him that my
personal knowledge Of his ideas AMI
mode of work would enable me to serve
tial stranger SO the bargain was
struck, and up TO Washington l went
as his private secretary.
"The colonel was a man of impor-
tance, and i'm the making up OF COM
mittees he was placed on the ways and
means committee: and through his in
Guence l was made secretary of that
august body. Those were stirring
times, and gee-whiZ, but IL was work!
Now IL so happened that a very i'm
portant matter came up which called
for an investigation by the whole com
mittee i'm New York. 1t was decided to
take along a lot of minor bills, go into
, session on the train and devote the
five hours journey to work. We had
"a special car. of course, and started
early i'm the morning, after an all night
session: and everybody was pretty
nearly used up. the chairman so much
so that he was too i'll to work. The
other members fretted and fumed about
the loss of time, when the chairman
solved the difficulty by proposing TO act
by proxy.
Gentlemen he said, these bills are
of minor Importance. Why not put
Bowser in my place in the chair ana
get To work and clean them off the
slate? He was in earnest, and his sug
gestion was adopted, the session opened
and / found myself in the position of
chairman of the ways and means COM
mittee.
"All went swimingly until a certain
bill came up which has been fostered
by my father. The colonel, as rival
of my father. had opposed il violently.
When put to vote there was tie, and
] cast the deciding vote in favor of the
bill. The colonel was wild. He looked
black as thunder, but said nothing till
we were al our journeys end and safe
ly i'm our private rooms at the Fifth
Avenue hotel when he let loose the
vials OF his wrath. and. turning OF me
with a blankety- blank blank. shouted:
Young man, what did you mean by ia
Voring that blankety- blank bill?'
well, colonel / replied, that bill
was all right. My father favored II
and he wouldn't favor anything that
wasn't dead right
Ugh growled the colonel: that
may be good fraternal equity but it's
damned bad politics.
Then he made rush for the bell. /
thought my time had come and could
see the metaphorical basket into which
my head was to fall. When the SER
want entered in answer TO the bell. the
colonel simply yelled: Waiter bring
two big drinks of old Kentucky whis-
key; and, waiter, make 'em straight"
Everybody in New York knows Lit
tie Dooley.'" said Comedian Charley
Bowser n few minutes later. that is,
everybody who knows Broadway and
clubdom. for Little Dooley. il a fea-
ture from the Astor house to the Plaza
hotel. He belongs to more brother
hoods, fraternities and societies than
any man in America; and when Little
Dooley' is your friend he's your friend
i'm earnest. He is friend OF mine; but
he led me into trouble once.
Il had just finished breakfast at my
club and was hurrying off to a re-
hnarsn1 nf Domestic CVrlOnp' when
| met Little Dooley with a roll OF
manuscript under his arm. | accosted
him with Hello. Dooley! Going into
the playwritinG business"
mo said Dooley, this is my fu-
neral Grafton over poor Mack
well | replied, I hope it's up TO
the mark, for I'll be there tomorrow to
hear it,
Tomorrow. indeed. exclaimed Doc
ley: 1T will all be over with my ora
ton tomorrow, for Mack is to be
buried today.
you're mixed on your dates, Doo-
ley my boy; the funeral takes place
tomorrow.
"'No. today replied Dooley. This
is Thursday, and Thursday is the day
of the interment
Taken aback at his resolute state
mont, | almost shouted: BY Jove!
that's so Wait, Dooley. till | tele-
graph up To Welch to dismiss the re-
hearsal. and I'll go with you. Mrs.
Mack would never forgive me If / were
not there
Mack was a great caterer. and Mrs.
Mack the best cook i'm New York: and
they were great favorites with the
boys The telegram was sent, and, as
it was a raw morning. We dropped into
Kinks for bracing nip 'Dooley'
slipped bottle of Kinks best I'm his
pocket saying. It's morning for DIS.
and an ounce OF prevention is worth a
pound of cure
THUS prepared. we made a rush for
Macks residence and arrived just i'm
time TO see the cortege drawn up i'm
lire ready to start. The first hack was
open and empty, so we dived into II.
closed the door and pulled down the
blinds. AS II our arrival was a signal.
the procession started at once. All the
way down town. over Brooklyn bridge
and out. through Brooklyn to the sub
urbs 'Dooley' was mumbling over his
grafton: and we were a silent pair, the
monotony of the Journey broken only
by an occasional pull NJ Kinks bottle.
Arrived at the cemetery. we made
slight DELAY. while 'Dooley' arranged