The Worcester spy. [volume] (Worcester, Mass.) 1898-1904, 1898-12-18

mosquitoes on squash vines, mosquitoes
| here, mosquitoes there, mosquitoes
| everywhere. Where's the man thai
would move to Whitinsville?
And that natty little nonpareil line
Special to the telegram" How nice
that sounds! Special and to the
Telegram" the Only" the Mellen
mouthpiece and the Blair Memorial
Special? Perhaps so; but how? Was
it by wire or by wheel, by cable or by
car by telephone or tally-ho? Per-
haps it doesn't matter, anyhow, so long
as it came: but, without getting fly at
all, there's a kind of natural curiosity
surrounding these things which must
be respected.
The best thing about this scoop
from Whitinsville, however, is the
news" God save the mark! Talk
about your Spanish wars, your riots in
Paris your wrecks along the coast!
Use the axe; there are mosquitoes in
Whitinsville-and flies Turn the col
umn rules, double lead it, and grind
out one of those pretty poetical heads,
for there are mosquitoes in Whitinsville
and the '"Gram" has got an exclusive.
Stop the presses, pull up the forms,
clear the first page! To the hell-boX
with the sermons, Y. NJ. c. A. news and
that sort of slush, there are mosqui-
Blair Memorial has got a SCOOP" Talk
about news! Here it is red hot and
reeking with sensationalism. MoSqui-
toes and flies in Whitinsville, and no
one knew it till the Only told EN-
so. Get a quart Of oats, hitch up the
horse, grease up that delivery van,
pump up the circulation man and start
him for Whitinsville. Get out that
stock cut and show EN- how they do
urh 70
but what a chance to get back the cir
culation!-a fly and a mosquito seen
hobnobbing in Whitinsville, and the
police in ignorance of the fact. Seen
by Timothy Sullivan, clerk for Her
bert Dudley.
Don't say where, but never mind;
isn't this an exclusivei Seen while tax
ing orders. Rather obscure; don't state
whether fly, mosquito, or Sullivan, or
Dudley was taking orders. But never
mind; don't cut a line of it, for
it's an exclusive and all the way from
Whttinsville. All! a clue to the mys-
terry. They We're seen out of doors flying
around. Now we are getting down to
hard pan. out of doors, chi And fly
ing around! Now, what do fly and a
mosquito want out of doors and flying
around and at this season of the year
and in WhitinsVille? Nothing good,
that head; here's the chance of a life
time. Maybe that fly and that mos
quito were out all night, perhaps they
are a runaway couple crossed in love,
who seek surcease from sorrow on the
frosty side of a December day, and
Wearied with the troubles of life in a
great city-like Worcester, with so
many great men--and great papers
hied them away to Whitnsville to live
and die in each others arms. Perhaps
they are bold bad villains, the outcasts
of the mosquito and the fly tribes who,
with every hand raised against them.
have gone forth into the cold, cold
world determined to beat out or bust.
Perhaps they have committed crimes,
foul nauseating crimes and seek to hide
themselves from the eyes of men or of
their fellows.
Perhaps that fly has worked havoc
in many a household. He may even
have invaded the quiet of the sanctu-
airy and by the strength of his person
ality, been the means of turning the
righteous from the straight and narrow
path Perhaps that mosquito has pune
tured somebody's tire. Perhaps the
villain has even drank of human blood.
Wough! this is terrible, but never mind
it's news" and it makes good read
ing, excellent reading-for primary
schools, so hurry along that story and
get it into type. What do we care if
it does SAVIOR of the sensational. What
matter if weak women faint and strong
men turn pale. Does not the only
print the news and only the news? Yea,
verify, and here endeth the reading of
the lesson.
But oh, Mr. Cgisty, charming Mr..