davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
ror, aoAos MUST co



They Are Com pseseey oct % asarDoay
with she TtDes.
There are localities IN which toll
roads exist and are fairly. well kept,
and where the other roads are exceed
ingly poor. BY comparison. ut least.
the toll roads are excellent In such
cases the wheelmen are apt to deprecate
agitation looking to the abolition Of toll
roads. fearing that everything would
sink to the level of the average, un-
eared-for country road. They prefer
to retain the existing toll ronds. with
their many Objectionable features, to
letting them go and taking the chances
on other roads improved and properly
cared for.
This is perfectly natural. Cycling de
pends SO much on the character Of the
roadways that we cannot afford to let
any fairly good roaGs become deterior-
a,ed. and some correspondents tell us
that where turnpike companies have
given up their charters. the roads have
been allowed to go 10 ruin. Such con-
dition OF affairs Is all wrong. and in
dicates a failure Of the people TO realize
their own interests and n lack of pro-
gressiveness in thisvery important direc-
tion. Does II not indicate. too. that
wheelmen have not agitated the road
question long enough and thoroughly
enough to arouse popular sentiment
and get public opinion formed intelli-
gently on the subject?
AS soon ms the importance OF having
good highways Is once appreciated, and
the people become sensible of the neces-
sity for concerted action, and the CO.
operation Of the state. when they get
out of their ruts and outgrow the notion
that good roads would be only of local
value. and unite in suitable legislation
for their promotion, they will realize
how completely toll roads have had
their day, passed their sphere Of use
fulness. and how out OF harmony they
are with the times.
The usefulness of toll roads in a limit
ed number of localities constitutes no
argument for nurturing an institution
which was born under very differen@
conditions from those which now pre-
vail. and which. after failing to move
with the rapid progression of the times,
hns fallen into decline, and in many
places refuses either to meet the re-
quirements of the times or vacate in fa-
vor Of the public. On the contrary,
IT imposes greater responsibility upon
the wheelmen OF such sections. as pio-
neers in. the good roads movement. to
carry on an agitation that will result in
the improvement OF the country roads,
and success in this direction will even
tually wipe out of existence the toll
roads. through the changes that will re-
suit from the construction of modern
Hghways.-L. A. W. Bulletin.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

A wealthy but eccentric citizen of
Hopkinsville, KY, who has had stone
coffin prepared for his burial many
years, is dead from blood poisoning,
aged 81. Ryan had fancy to rest in
a grave that should be perfectly secure.
He had two immense stone caskets
h>wn out, one for himself and one for
his wife. and kept them on exhibition.
His wife died some years ago. Her re-
mains were sealed up in the stone sar-
cophagus, which was then sunk deep
in the graveyard. His own coffin was
placed beside her Gave and will row d
used.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

Claus Spreckels is said TO have over
100000 invested in beet sugar re-
fneries. In one factory alone 5000 tons
of beets are consumed each day. Annu-
ally. in this country, 100000 tons Of
sugar are used. Owing to the INSULT
cheney of the home supply much of the
sugar required by the great fruit ard
condensed milk factories is imported.
In order to give us the necessary
amount of sugar each year 1,333,333
acres of beet-producing land. yielding
5000 pounds of sugar to an acre, should
be cultivated. 1t is believed that farm
ers may realize three times as much
money from raising sugar beets as from
crops of wheat.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
nut Possible

To benefit morally, mentally and
materially every resident of the
state; to encourage immigration;
TO establish new enterprises; to in
crease the value of every acre
of good land; to set the debtor free
by enabling him to pay his debts; to
aid the growth OF moral and religious
sentiment in the rural districts by
making smooth the road 10 church. and
to confer upon future generations the
great boon of general education by re-
moving the chief obstacles to attend
ance at school-bad roads and poverty,
are the aims Of the Florida Good Roads
association.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

There is one young man who can say
he went through water to win wife.
1t all happened through rise in the
Raritan river. Walter c. Dobbins was
on one side Of a swollen stream and Miss
Bertha Gorton Van Cleef was on the
other side. The marriage had been
fixed for three o'clock at the Van Cleef
home in East Milestone. Dobbins
started at 10:30 n. IN. in a coach. At
Bound brook II was necessary to 60
through the tunnel over which the Cen
tral railroad crosses. There was six
feet OF water in the tunnel. 1t took 10
minutes TO measure the bright Of the
tunnel before the dash was made. The
coach barely squeezed through. Once
on the right side of the Raritan the
horses were urged to their speediest.
and the final dash. 10 the door Of the
brides house was made in good style.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

Pupils are conducted through many
"ologies" and introduced to many
"isms," but they are not well grounded
in the three or four primary matters of
an English education, rightfully re-
marks the Des Moines Register. A boy
or girl who has learned to read and
write and spell, with a knowledge Of
arithmetic and geography. is better pre-
pared for university education than
a boy or girl who has been dragged
through an endless array of the So
called higher studies in the common
schools.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
The wife Of S. A. whitmore. a bankee,

The wife Of S. A. Whitmore, banker
at Drayton. n. D., received q unique
Christmas present in the shape Of a
mountain turtle. Nearly 80 years ago
her husband was boy on hfs fathers
farm in Wayne county, O. He found a
mountain turtle, on which he cut his
initials, "S. A. W." A few weeks ago
Will Adams. son Of Postmaster C. C..
Adams. Of Wooster. while out hunting
found the turtle. A notice Of the find
happened to catch Mr.. Whitmore's eye
and he opened up n correspondence
with the boy, resulting in the turtle
being expressed TO Mr.. Whitmore. lie
says that he will care for II as long as
il lives. and when ii dies he will have
the she'll mounted as souvenir from his
boyhood home.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

A clergyman in Maine offered TO u
widow seat in his carriage, in which
he was driving TO church. She was not
quite ready to start, and to save time
he offered to feed q calf in the barn
while she put on her bonnet. The calf
rplashed pan of milk all over the min
ister's clothes, and when the widow
went to the barn to see what the noise
was about, the parson and the calf were
mixing it up" as Hon. Mr.. Fitzsim-
mons would say. The calf's neck has a
twist in it yet.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
FLOOD GATE SUBSTITUTE.

been placed in position. It is best to
make the poles or rails of some good
timber. Use enough of these 10 make
the fence or gate sufficiently high.
These swing around on the rods rs the
water forces them apart. When the
water recedes these can be ngain placed
in position, and there is no loss of fence
material. The ends are laid on each
other, as in building up rail fence
Albert Shewmaker, in Orange Judd
Farmer.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
ilurlse and Ills Digger.

When Burke. in melodramatic fash
ion. threw down the dagger on the floor
of the house, eXclaiming: ''These are
the fruits of your French revolution!"
Sheridan was heard TO whisper: "rhc
gentlem,n has brought US the knife,
but where is the fork?" Laughter"
as Quinsilian observes. "has more
despotic power than anything else"
but there are things on which men feel
deeply, when they will not tolerate
Ievity, and the words of King Henry TO
Falstaff rise to the lips: "Reply not TO
me with some fool-born jest"-West-
minister Review.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

A story told out Of pride has cost .
girl Of Beloit. Wis.,. : husband. unless
the prospective groom changes bis
mind. Clara Christensen was to have
wed Landers Noughen. and many In
vitations had been issued. and the we'd
ding feast prepared. The bride had
some time ago informed her lover that
she had 500 in the bank. which she had
saved to help furnish the house he had
built. and the day OF the wedding. while
the new furniture was being taken into
the house Houghen suggested that she
turn over her money so that he could
pay the balance due on the furniture,
and thus they could start in with every
thing free of debt. She said she would,
and an hour afterward reported that
she had drawn the 500 from the bank
and had lost it. OF course everybody
who heard Of the loss searched for the
money, but during the day it wns re-
vcaled that the bride-to-be had not had
any money 10 lose. Wnen spe confessed
to her lover that she had circulated
the report because she had deceived
him he was very angry. and refused to
marry her when the time for the serv-
ice had arrived. The wedding was
therefore declared off, but the guests
were hidden to the wedding supper.
which the bridegroom had prepared.
Friends thought the ceremony would
take place later in the night. but
Houghen declined to wed the girl. say
ing that her deceit had frozen his heart
against her. She pleaded with him for
forgiveness. but he was obdurate. Now
for breach Of promise.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
ONE OF TWO WAYS.

M. No.,
Inc o'aoder WAS created Tor one
PIrpose, nsineIy, rrcspt"c's Tor the
urine, ana rs sncn " Is NOT liable to
auy 'oru oi M,sease @ ~xcept oy one ot
.wo ~ays me nrst way IL from
mper,ect ac'ion ci tue S'dneys. The
seccna way rs ir",' careless local
''e"'""e"t Oh oIner diseases.
CHIEF CAUSE.
Unhealthy urine from unhealthy
kidnevs is the chief cause of bladder
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
bishop McCabe, of New York,
on Or James Headache

with regard to DR.. James Head
ache Powders, I have no hesitation
in commencing them to sufferers
from headache. They relieve the
pain speedily, and have never
known anyone to be harmed by their
use. ] have been n great sufferer
from headache in my life, but have
almost gotten rid of it by the con-
slant use OF hot water and fruit and
by doing without coffee. The DR.
James Headache Powders have,
however. greatly relieved me at times
and never allow myself to be with
out them, and have recommended
to others freely. G. G. MoCABR."
For sale by w. II. Spangler, Drug
gist Middleburgh, Pa. 6l7-9m
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
RctraCtlOn.

"Col. Blood" says the current issue
of the Weekly BATTLE AK and Loyal Mis-
sissippian, "has called at this Office and
demanded n retraction Of our remark
that he was n famous liar. We retract
cheerfully and fully and do so by here
by stating that the esteemed colonel
is an infamous liar" - indianapolis
Journal.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
A tramp accosted a Mcpherson (Mo.

A tramp accosted Mcpherson (Mo)
woman who was shoveling snow of her
sidewalk the other day, for something
to eat. "Shovel this snow of" she said,
"and I'll give you dinner" He drew
himself up TO his full height and re-
piled: MADAM, do you think for q
moment that 1 am SO dead to the in
stncts of q gentleman as to enter into
competition with woman? Perish the
thought"
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

Small Southern Boy (politely)-
Please pass the 'lasses. 70 .'t ~
Prim Northern Aunt-You mean mo-
lasses, do you not? ~ ,1
Small Southern Boy-How can mean
mo. 'lasses when haven't had any,
N. Y. Truth. t -.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
The Burnt Child, Etc,

$50 you are really going to get mar
ried?" asked Mr.. Longsuiferer, Of his
nephew, Charlie Rashboy.
"Yes, indeed, want TO be happy
man."
"And that's the way you go at IT," re-
piled Longsufferer, with n side-glance
at his wife in the next'room. That's
like trying to heat an oven with snow
bnlls."-Tamman Times.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
Exa mple at Hand.

Johnny docking up from his read
ing)-Mother, what is a bookworm?
Mrs. Billus with a sharp sidelong
glance at Mr.. Billus) "A bookworm,
Johnny, is man that always sticks his
nose in n book or paper when his
wife wants to talk to him. - Chicago
Tribune. ---L--
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
rAeorx ana Pr.etice.

Madame Tweedledee (princ;pal Of
great dramatic school)-I wns 70 sorry
l could not be present at your debut
last night Did You follow my advice.
and hold your powers in check during
the earlier acts, SO rs to reserve your
self for the grand climax in the fourth
act?
New Society Actress-Y-e-s.
Madame Tim so glad. And didn't
the audience go perfectly wild over that
grand clmacteric scene in the fourth
act?
New Actress (sodly)-They went be-
fore the fourth act-all Of them.-N. Y.
Weekly.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
To Keep the streets Clean.

"After great deal of thought and
patient figuring" he said. 81 feel that
can safely say that / have solved one Of
the great municipal problems"
(which is?" they asked him.
keeping the streets Clean" he re-
piled.
"How would you do ftp"
81 would assess the cost where II be-
longs-on the men who advertise by
means of handbills and circulars" he
answered. .-Chicag Post.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
PENNSYLVANIA RAILROAD.
Sunbury Il Lewistown Division.
In effect Nov %, 1897.

Train leaves Sunbury 5 25 D IN, ar
rives at Selinsgrove 8 As p III
Trains leave Lewistown Junction
So a m, 10 IS q m.I237 ms 27 p mr. on II sspm
Altoona, Pittsburg and tho West.
rs i5 0!p IN For Philadelphia and New
York 8 33 35 IN, I 90 I SO 43 and II 10 . m For
Harrisburg 90 IN and 2opin
Philadelphia & Erie R r Division.
NORTHERN CENTRAL RAILWAY
.rains leave Sunbury daily except Sunday
"a m for Erie and Canandaigua
or G: and ,S
10 p m for Bellefonto Kane 4 CanaEdaieua
bNp m for Remove and Elmira
y % IN Tor Leck Haven
Sunday 8 i3 q m for Erie and Canandniyua
945am for Lock Haven AMI 9a5 p IN for vii.
Transport
526a m for Catawissa and Hazelton
% m, 9 IS IN 10 and asp m Tor Wilkes
barre and Hazelton
5So e.; a m, - 70 = n: ss p m. S45 m for shamo-
Sunday 0 IS q u for Wilkesbarre
Trains leave Selinsgrove Junction
100 m, week days arriving at PHI ,delphia
NY NY IN New YORK bS p IN Baltimore 3 II p IN
sai p N daily arriving a, Philadelphia
10 20 p IN New York 8 So q IN. Baltimore 9l5pm
S4lpm. week days arriving at Philadelphia
80 IN New York I 33 IN
\ Trains alsO leave Sunbury:
so q IN daily arriving at Phiadeidhia Q 50 III
Baltimore 20 q IN Washington 74O m New
York V33 m Weekdays, 10 8S N Sundays,
81 pm, week days arriving at Philadelphia
Sg3 m. New York 93O p In, Baltimore % m
Washington bpm
Trains also leave Sunbury at $50 IN and 25
and y 30 p N, for Harrisburg, Philadelphia and
Baltimore
J X. WOOD. Gen'l Pass Agent
j. b. HUTCHINSON, Gen1 Manager
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
How Roads Are Ruined.

A macadam road that Is covered with
mud after every rain and in winter
has either been improperly construct
ed. or does not receive proper care
probably both. In such a case proper
return Is not being received from the
Investment
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
A Natural Query.

First Deaf Mute Qn department store.
speaking by finger signs, admiringly)
Those two salesgirls over there are
rather pretty! tH
Second Deaf Mute (spealsing ditto.
puzzled)-Yes l wonder II they are
talking with each other. or merely
chewing gum ?-Brooklyp Eagle.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
Ruts in macaarm Roads.

Nothing is more ruinous to ma
cadam road than water. Ruts hold wa
ter. and. therefore, should never be al
lowed to exist. To guard against their
formation ind development is one OF
the principal parts Of proper care Of n
rondwny.---L a. W. Bulletin.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
A Nice NciEhborhood.

Deacon Ebony - heah you hab
moved, Brudder Black. Has you got
inter select neighborhood?
Brudder Black-I hab. fer fac, dea-
con. Nebber saw sich n selection OF
chickens in nah life.-N. Y. Weekly.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
PILES PERMANENTLY CURED
In from 3 TO . days time. by tlse us'
Of E.0..M(b.

One bottle guaranteed to cure any
case of piles, regardless OF how lo:g
standing. what you have tried, or
what your physician may claim.
Money refunded II permanent cure Is
not obtained in the most severe cases
In less than B days time. After all
others fail get Lo-Mo and be cured,
Price 75c. per bottle, sent prepaid
to any address. on receipt OF price.
Address Harry Logne, 100 w. Fourth
street, Williamsport, Pa. 023-1y
ED'Sold by all first class drugg!sts
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
lie Wasn't Sure,

'Is your picture in the academy sue
eess?"
THAT'S what am wondering. Some
one said it was worth the price Of admis-
sion."-Tit-Bits.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
A blow AGAINST VANITY,

Algernon O'Rafferty (gloomily)-
I'm goin' ter Klondike.
Marguerite Maloney--Wot fer?
Algernon O'Rafferty-Ter dig gold.
Marguerite Maloney-IIum. 1 sup
pose wenye cum back yen be drivin' yer
own goat wild harness made outen mug
gets, but have n care. Me ladders a
plumber an winters on.-Chicago In
ter Ocean.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
NOT HARD TO MAKE.

HOW TO COnstruct q GOOo Substitute
u for . Flood Gate. -
! Where a flood gate cannot be used,
the device shown in the illustration is
very desirable; represents the posts
or trees to which the device is attached;
b is piece Of iron in the shape Of q
capital l., the lower end Of which is
driven into the post. Further up is a
small iron with an eye which fits over
the upper end Of this iron. Thisis driven
in or turned in after the poles have
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
Easy Enough.

Mrs. Brooks-How did you break
your husband Of going out nights?
Mrs. Banks-I told him he talked in
his sleep.-Harlem Life.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
A bad Opinion of II.

Mr.. Wilberforcc-What do you think
of the third party, Miss Dimhng?
Miss Dimling-Oh, always rerested
a chaperon.-Louisville Courier-Jour-
nal
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

Book Worm-Haveyou acopy of "Fif-
teen Decisive Battles?"
Saleslady-No; but I've got ''Recol-
lcctions OF Married Man.'--Tit-Bits.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

So far no Klondiker has beem.heard
from who did not report "the best route
10 the Klondilse" was the one coming
home."
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

Maud-I have heard people say she
sings like bird.
Madge-She does sing incessantly.-
Puck.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

Bacon-To what do you attribute old
Coldstein's success?
Egbert - To mis- failures.-Yonkers
Statesman,
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

Mrs. Gabbleton-Ia am a woman offew
words.
OLD Gabbleton-Yes, but you warm
EN- orer 50 often.--Ppck. -
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
The Hunt for Unhappiness

Where ignorance is bliss,
But suspicious women who
Search their husbands pockets through
Never think, alas. of this!
Chicago Daily News
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

TO CURE A COLD IN ONEDAY
Take Laxative Quinine Tablets. All Drug.
gists refund the money II IL fails to cur. pc.
l0lt7m.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

Trustworthy and Active gentle
w men or ladies to travel for responsible, es-
tablished house In Snyder County. Monthly
encc. Enclose self-addrcssed stamped enve-
lope. The Dominion Company, Dept Y.
Chicago, Illinois. 0-i6-l6t
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27
4 Paradox,

I've often heard II said,
And often seen.
That blackberries are red
When they are green.
N. Y..Journal.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

EVERLASTING pStS pas, Recipe to .a.. make Fence
time Is good for oil kinds OF timber. Recipe
for making this paint, SOC. Write to-day. Adj
dress, ID. q. Back, Kreamer. Pa. 5tf
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1898-01-27

WANTED-Agents to sell washing machines
Jones l.. Knoll, l07 s. 4 St., Lebanon, Pa. jy &.
The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-08-27
HOAR MAY SUCCEED HAY.
He Can Go to the Court of st. James If
He Desires the Position.

BOSTON Aug. 26-The Journals Wash
ington correspondent says: IF George F.
Hoar will consent to accept an appointment
as ambassador at the court of ST. James
the appointment will probably be made The
President is seriously thinking of asking the
senior senator from Massachusetts to take
the place which will soon be vacated by
Ambassador Hay, and he is restrained only
by his reluctance to remove Senator Hoar
from the position he now holds. 1t is hardly
believed that Senator Hoar would be willing
to abandon the Senate after so many years
in order to enter on diplomatic career, in
volving the formation of ties and the accept
ance of strange conditions, but the Presi-
dent has thought that he would be the ideal
American representative in London at a
time when relations between Great Britain
and the United States have become so close
and when the duties of an ambassador are
to be peculiarly delicate and important.
Senator Hoar is perhaps the one American
who, without great wealth, can maintain
the prestige of an ambassador in London,
for he is almost the only American who is
SO well known and highly regarded there
that he could safely live as he liked The
one thing which causes the President to
hesitate is that he has not already sounded
the senator on the subject and is unwilling
TO take him out of the Senate"