The Denison review. [volume] (Denison, Iowa) 1867-current, 1898-09-30
WORSE THAN B A TTLE,
ALL THE BOYS AGREED cUBA's BUGS.
WERE lNsuFFERARLE.

g" :;.I s'rs s:- s; ~ 81 !; n; II:
! Mulyaney ana HniarousJ0ne9.
They were all talking about the war, as
brave soldiers will, and one and all agreed
that the bugs Of Cuba, including land
crabs, scorpions and tarantulas, were the
hardest nuts to crack in the whole cam
paign.
.They don't tackle blooded stock like
me-" said Ralnrod Jones, "but tell YOU
what does, and that the tarantula. I'm
positively convinced that If went to sleep
in a spot with the nearest tarantula five
miles away before morning that cussed
spider would be trying to make q nest in
my ear
fanny of 'em spike yer"
| "Only three. Two on the leg and one on
the arm It's bad enough, but it ism t as
bad as most people think. The worst bite
got didn't lay me up for more than two
days. What object to mostly is the feel
| ing of having one of the hairy beasts on
you"
"Out on the firm line, . said Mulyaney,
EVAN day mind it was July 2, fer
that was the day got two meals to keep
up with the date-sorra the luck that they
didn' t kape along on that principle
as I was sayin when somebody Interrupted
me, which think it was myself, that day
we was shootin pretty lively when E
Troop man began lettin off with six
! shooter he'd picked up somewheres right
into the mound in front of the trench,
Along came an officer swearin blue blazes.
What are yez doin there, ye fool?' he;
says. do yez want to shoot peepholes fer
to see the Spaniards through?'
Il got him, lieutenant says the E
troop man; i got him. He had his eye
on to me an was comm my way in series
Of ferocious leps, he says, but nailed
him on the last shot, an turn me blue
av he didn't point out big tarrantaler
kickin his last wit bullet troo his mid
de-
Gone Of 'em nearly gave me pneu-
monia, !" observed the dude
Dragged the blankets off you, sup
pose, to line his nest WITH" said Ramrod
sardonically.
"I've seen 'em big enough for that"
He just roasted on the inside Of the tent
over my cot. !"
"Waitin fer to drop down on yer slum-
berlin FORM" put in Mulvaney. such is
their outragis habuts."
"Didn t get the chance this time. It
was one of those blazing white moonlight
nights when the light Sits right through
the tent. My bunkie happened to wake
up and saw q black blotch crawling up
the canvas. he didn't say word, but
just reached down for his gun, got good,
long sight and sent that tarantula flying
through the tent on a free trip to the
planet Mars, which was pretty prevalent
over Cuba about then. I was too sleepy
to do more than curse once at the noise,
but made up for the lack afterward, for
In an hour there came up rainstorm,
with the storm center coming down in 8
Niagara through that hole. didn't do q
thing but get up in the morning with q
hospital lung that never has quite straight
ened out. :"
Did you ever see one of those big light
brown tarantulas Jump" queried Charley.
Horse.
81 never seen wan that cud jump as far
as me av seen him first remarked Null
vaney.
"You must be in line for a champion
ship, then," said Charley '.I've seen 8
big buck spider that threw boot at aft
CT I'd got out of my tent take nip at the
boot and then leap the whole length Of the
tent and land three feet up on the canvas
and stick there, with his eyes blazing"
"Id like to see the chap that would stay
in his tent when one Of 'em had taken up
his abode there, /" said the dude. ~ know
I always got out and danced on the green
sward as soon as heard tarantula rat
Ting around in my tinware. Funny how
they always take to your tinware and then
come around and crawl into your blankets
ism t it?''
If the scorpion had the same habit of
announcing himself, he'd be easier to get
along with, - said Ramrod "The trouble
is with him you never know when he's
there."
ooh, yes, said the dude Hes always
there. You can't miss him."
Where do them scarpeens live when
they do be at homer" inquired Mulvaney.
sin my boots" said Corky positively.
II kept two select boarding houses for
scorpions all the time was in Cuba, one
in each boot, and there was an eviction
every morning after I'd got stung acouple
of times, and some deaths, too, when was
quick enough. 1t takes lively man to
catch an ablebodied scorpion"
You ought to put salt in your boots,
advised the dude. "That'll keep 'em out,
so Troop H's bug hunter says"
| Somebody told that to Metropolitan
Bill, my bunkie," said Corky, "and as he
didn't have any salt to spare he got some
sugar somewhere and tried that; said q
scorpion wouldn't know the difference
Result was that all the ants in Cuba came
and ate holes in Bills boots"
That boog hunters broth av lad"
quoth Mulvaney. "He'd have his tent
full Of butterflies an moths all the time
that he'd catch with his hat. While we
were fightin on the line wan day red,
white and blue boog came foatin by, look
in like star spangled banner wit wings
to it. Up jumps the boog hunter. There's
y pollyoticus pillywinkus!' he yells an
goes off after it in the face of the Spanish
fire. When he come back, which was not
until the Ammerykin flag boog was comb
IN Its whiskers in the top of mango tree,
he'd hole in his hat fer token av Span
ish sharpshootin.
He's the chap that got q live tarantula
and said he'd bet ten hard tack and pair
V~R ArA -