The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1898-12-18
VAIL OF POETS UNION
THE EVENING NEWS is EMPLOYING
A SCAB RHYMESTER.
violates All the Trade Rules by Sell
fngsVerses as He Would
Sausages.

! lied last night in order that the combined
| energies of the profession may be used
against an evening newspaper that threat
ems to grind poetry and it's makers under
its tyranical heel Alfred Tennyson Bards-
ley was unanimously elected president of
| the union and he responded gracefully to
the calls for a speech Mr.. Bardsley
| formerly a boiler maker. One day he fell
and struck his head on his hammer. He was
unconscious for five days, and when he
revived he was poet His ability took
form in the death sentiment" line. Mr..
Bardsley is recognized among litterateurs
as man of genius in his speciality, if that
plebeian term may be used in this connec-
ton.
Brothers and fellow-workers in the field
of poesy," said President Bardsley, I'VE
have associated ourselves together this night
| for the purpose of confronting boldly a mon
ster in print that threatens our holy art. 1
need not explain what this monster is or
| what it threatens, for you know it well
as I, and it hurts me inexpressibly to think
| of it, much more to discuss it. Let us bend
/ our every energy to fighting this foe, even as
we fought the syndicate that demanded that
| we grind out, at the rate of So a column,
those thoughts which should be the spon-
| taneous product of the brain guided by our
beloved muses.. But what can be said of this
| monsteri'
| At this point Mr. BardsIey was overcome
by his emotion, and, pressing his artistically
tapered hand to his high forehead, he ex-
claimed in fluffy tones, ooh, Poetry. thou
heaven-born maid!'
The members of the union, who were
gathered close about their president felt in
stinctively, being under control of extreme
y sensitive minds, that no word should be
| spoken. The brooding silence was broken
! by the president, who, with cheerier tone
| in his voice, announced that there was a
repast awaiting the unions discussion in
back room. During the dinner the following
resolution was adopted unanimously:
Resolved That we, the members OF the
Indianapolis Poets Union, denounce the
| Evening News, to which we were attracted
| because it is called the University, as a
| tyrant and ogre which has in mind the
prostitution of Poetry TO mere money
/ getting DEVICE and we will hereafter devote
| our energies and minds to uplifting the
| want ad page of the Cincinnati Enquirer
| by contributing to it the verse which we
write that immortal and ever-beautifIl
| subtect-Death
The explanation of the cause of the or
| ganizltion of the union and the bitterness
| poured out by the poetical coterie of the
! literati against the larger of the evening
papers is found in perusing the verses on the
want adj page of this paper. There is a
| large number of people who have lost mem
| bers of their families or their friends, who
deem it their duty to have printed in the
| sOrrowing over their deaths. This particu-
| lar newspaper has been set on as the favor
| lite organ of this class and the Saturday
evenings issue is the one in which the
verses usually appear. The poets discovered
| that one rhyme. twisted and deformed to
suit the different names or the prices agreed
| TO be paid by the customer, was appearing
| in this paper. If the customer only cared
| to pay for eight lines he was given what he
| We nj or If 10
! that amount he was suited. A suspicion
arose that the advertising clerk was being
| when time proved that this was true, the
poets organized. A careful examination of
| the files of this newspaper reveals the con-
ditiOn set out below.
/ About two years ago Edward" passed
away and the second anniversary of his
death occurred few days ago. Then the
following appeared on the want ad" page
| of the paper under discussion:
1.-TWO long sad :, years have slowly ~ passed passed
The hand OF death touched his brow,
But we know he's in heaven now
| His fond and earnest care
Our home is dark without him;
God loved him. too and He thought best
| To take him home to be at rest.
Three years back from day which the
| world passed but few weeks ago Blanche"
| died, and the following verse in commem-
Grafton of her appeared:
| ''Three long, sad years have slowly passed,
| Since dear Blanche breathed her last;
The hand Of death touched her brow,
| But we know she's in heaven now.
! We miss her kind and loving hand,
| Her fond and earnest care.
| Our home is dark without her,
| We miss her everywhere.
| To take her home to be at rest"
When the second anniversary of ell
mers' death came around, which was but a
few days ago, the advertising clerk must
| have had a change of mind, for after the
/ first two lines of the stock verse q new tack
| was taken, with the following result:
1.-TWO long, sad years have slowly passed
Since dear Elmer breathed his last.
| Heaven now retains our treasure,
1 Earth his lonely caSket keeps,
| And the sunbeams love to lipger
Where our dearest Elmer sleeps
| God loved him, too and He thought best
| To take him home to be at rest"
'Lizzie's'' friends wanted to invest only
| enough money to buy three lines. so it was
run i'm and really four lines of lin memoir
| lam" were given them as special mark of
favor:
''one precious to our, hearts has gone, the
voice we loved is stilled. Her place made
vacant in our home never more be filled"
| A newspaper man insists that while in
| the counting room of this paper one day he
| heard a conversation between an undertaken
and the advertising clerk, in which the
| clerk said: well, now, here is something
| that we have used with universal satisfac-
| ton. l do not attempt to estimate how
many times 1T has been printed but in every
| case those who paid for it have assured us
| that they got their moneys worth. 1t is
lines I will fix it for you. But cannot
work in Marie Rose you will have to
make it Mary or Rosy 1t sounds just
as well, and to me it sounds a little more
| sentimental and grievous, and, if / do say
| it myself / have been told by my employ
ers that L have a good ear for poetry. Even
| the managing editor came in the other day
and said in his opinion was a natural-born
adapter. What could be more sweet than
this Two long, sad years have slowly
/ passed. -
The undertaken was convinced, the news
paper man said, and bought five lines of the
verse. He had been deputized by the be-
reaved family to put token in the paper
and he had done it as economically as pos
| sible
The result of the organization of the poets
/ will be looked for with interest. 1t is
| question whether the newspaper will after a
| time crave that the boycott be removed so
| that it may have some new death verse;
| or will continue to adapt the present verse
/ to all occasions and names
A Wonderful Woman.
! Chicago Record.
.'Hobson ,dotes on his mother-in-law."
Just to be peculiar?''
/ mo: at Christmas she ALWAYS sends him