The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-15
RTHnLrTTnK oI ~.

Or ons eooa TGTn Deserves AnSaAsr l1-
omplinsd-In rwontlsth Csntury HAS
win Rest and Let woman Do tbs HuS-
tiinE.
The twentieth century husband was
asleep In the parlor OF the little Har-
lem fat. He made pretty picture as
he lay curIed up on the lounge with his
aiiken tresse5 Of the fashionable Titan
shade, his dainty spring shirt waist and
the chIffon bloomers which reached TO
MS slender anklea In his small, whke
hands was a copy of the Young Mans
Home Journal, opened at the page Of
''Hints to Beauty Seekers" Evidently
he had been in the act Of reading the
well-known Philadelphia periodical
when, overcome by drowsiress, he had
fallen asleep.
One, two, three, four, I'VE. SIX, chlmed
the ormolu clock upon the mantel piece.
The sound awakened the young hus-
band. GOOD graclous!" he exclaimed.
"six o'clock already and Susan will be
home In half an hourl I mustn't keep
her waiting for dinner again I shall
never forget the dreadful language she
used the last time 1t occurred"
spHnging to his feet he fetched his
wife's slippers from the bedroom and
placed them upon the electric radiator
to warm. Then he hurried into the
kitchen ard busied himself with mash
Ing the potatoes, pounding the beef
steak to make 1t tender, and with Vari-
out other little preparations for the
evening meal.
At 6:25 everything was ready and the
pretty housekeeper had five minutes to
spare before his wlfe's aIrship was due
to alight upon the roof. sudden
thought occurred to him that made him
clap mis- hands and giggle ike a school
boy. "I'l give her little surprise ne
murmured gleefully.
There was no time to be lost. Hastily
shutting the kitchen door so that the
smell OF the cooking would not spoil his
little scheme, he scrIbbled a few hurried
words on a sheet of'note paper, and laid
II on the dining room table. Then ne
touched button which extinguished al
the electric lights and left the nat In
total darkness. Scarcely had he done
50 when his quick ears caught the Hap
ping sound OF gigantic steel wings:
Almost simultaneously the prolonged
hiss Of brakes denoted that the vast ma
chine was coming to standstiH over
head.
A few moments later the young bust
ness woman tramped heavily down the
stairs which led from the roof, tried thS
door OF the fat and mutteret impatient
" at finding Il locked. Then, after con-
siderable fumbiIng she produced her
latchkey and admitted herself An eG-
cIamation Of astonishment escaped her
when she saw the place was apparently
deserted. Where the deuce can he
be?" she mutteredL ITS the first time
have known this to occur since our mar
rage" Turning on the lights, she
staIked into the dining room, snatched
up the sheet Of paper and read the fol-
''FareweH forever. am tired OF mar
ried life and have gone home to pap.
GEORGE"
with staring eyes and puzzled brain
the Young wife read and re-rea6 the
cruel words, at first mechanically and
then With a sinking heart. Brave and
womanly as she was, she could scarcely
keep bacx the tears that welIed INTO
her eyes.
her two loving arms embraced her
tightly and she felt mans soft cheek
upon her own. ''You silly old girl!'
said her husbands voice. ITS all
Joke. You didn't think 1 meant It. did
your"
Instead Of returning his fond oareszes
the wife roughly disengaged herself
WITH blush to record it-an exclama-
ton Of profanity!
Her husband looked at her with an
expression Of agony on his gentle fea-
lures. Are you sorry that-that
didn't go?" he asked in trembling tones.
"Of course mott" was the gruff re-
Spouse OF the young business woman
but wish to heaven you wouldn't be
quite so demonstrative. had some
twenty-five cent cigars in my vest peck
ct, and dollars to doughnuts that you've
smashed 'em every one!"-New York
Journal