The age-herald., 1898-09-04
DooLEY DISCUSSES ALGER.
Chicago Philosopher Discourses Upon
 the Woes of the Secretary.
From the Chicago Journal.

From the Chicago Journal
 ''I usen't to know" said MT. Dooley, ''what me frind Gin'ral sherman meant whin he said that thing about war. I've been through two iv thim, not to speak iv con-vintions an primaries, an divvle tn bit iv harm come to me no more thin if was settin on a roof playin' an ac- corjeen But 1 know now what tn OP la'ad meant. He meant war was hell Whin twas over
 ''I aint heerd amy noise fir m tn fellows that wint into trenches an plugged tn villyanious Spanyard. Most iv thim is too weak to kick. But tn proud an fearless pathrites who restrained thimsilves an didn't go to tn fr'ront, tn laadS that sthrugged hard with their warlike tindin- cies an fin'lly downed thim an stayed at home an practiced up on tn typewriter, they're ragin' an tearin' an desthroyin' their foes
 'Did ye see waht me frind Alger wrote to Chansy Depoo? Well, sir Alger has been msthreated. There's a good man. say he's good man. An he is, too. At amy thrick firm shingles to two-be-fours he's as good tn best. But no wan ap- prechated Alger No wan understand him. No wan even thried to. Day be day he published tn private letters iv other peo- pie, an that didn't throw amy light on his charackter. Day be day he had his pitchers took, an still tn people didn't get onto tn curves iv him. Day be day he cnatteO W tn IuTrOTS W war, an Stlil people ony said An Alger also Fran. But tn time come whin Alger cud contain himself no longer, an he set down an wrote to Chansey Depoo.
 "Mr. Chansy Depoo, care iv Grand Cin- tral Depew, New York, New York, Es- quire. Dear Chanse: I've been expectin' a letter firm ye fir three or four days. In reply to same will say: Oh, Chanse, ye don't know how I suffer. I'm that low in me mind I feel like bunch iv lathes. Oh dear to think iv what I've gone through. I wint into tn war unprepared. I had on'y so many r-rounds iv cartridges an a cross- cut saw, an I failed to provide mesif with tn ord nary necessities iv life. But in spite iv me deficiencies I wint bravely ahead Tn sthrain was something tur'rble on me- Me mind give out repeatedly, I cud not think at times, but I niver faltered. In two months I had enough supplies piled up in Maine to feed iv'ry sojer in Cubai. They were thousands iv r-rounds iv cart ridges fir livery reg ment an all tn rig ments had to do was to write fir thfrn. Tn navy had taken Manila and Cervera s fleet an tn army had taken Santiago an tn yellow fever. Tn war is over an peace wanst more wags her wings over tn coun- thry. Pine scantlings is quoted tshrong. Anywhere is peace an contint. Me pho- tographs are on sale at all first-class news- dealers. Yit there is no cam fir me.
 'Onthinkin' vans insult me- They tell me a sojer can't ate gin'ral ordhers. They want me to raysign an go back to rne humble home in Michigan. DisgustIn' men that've done nawthin' but get thip- silves shot ask f'r milk an quinine They Il be askin' me to carry food to thim next. Oh, Chanse, oh, hvens ye can't know how grieved I am! Rather wud I have perish- ed in a log jam thin to've indured this in gratichood. But in lookin' back over me past life can think iv no wrong I've done. If me mem'ry is at fault please note Me career.is an open book. I've held nawthin' back firm tn public not even whin twas marked private. I can say with -th pote that I done my jooty. But oh, Chanse! don't iver aspire to my job Be sicrety iv war if you will, but niver be sicrety iv A war Do not offer this letter to tn news papers. Make thim take it.. How's things goin' with ye, oP pal? I hope to see ye at tn seaside. Till thin I'm yours, sick at heart, but 'atin reg'lar Russ .
 'well." said MT. Hennessy. .''th' phoor man.must've had har'rd time iv it."
 'He did, said MT. Dooley ''Niver laid his head to pillow before &, up with tn moon, he's suffered as no man can tell But he'll be all r-rfght whin his minds at r-rest'