davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
THE SENSE OF HuMoR.
q ". oas ef ,hs Lsss sfi-s ufnsres
Great Charms.

AFeat NHaNmAs
A sure. keen sense Of humor wEs BY
no means the least Of the late Frances
T. Wizards many great and good gifts.
Il was largely Instrumental In her sue
cess as aa organizer and leader. Many
a trylr Moment Of possible tension
has ff.rthtened and frightened BY
a good story or some appropriate and
timely Incident. She was alway ready
10 join In a laugh and often she laugh-
I'd - herself. but she was neTer known
20 laugh AZ OILERS. Her belle. 10 those
who worked with her was ihcir lnspi-
ration. Like pliny. she always saw me
good In ar cO.ITaccs: {, feem,d 20
though she could not see the bad. II
her flasses we're now and then -o-e-
colored. she refused 10 think 20. and
no matter how much blaze she might
receive Tor that. vent on her way with
q sincere spirit. believing trait the had
merely anticipated. and that folks
would some day be as sht thought
them. Folks" was a faSorite word
OF Miss WnlarFs Her kindness *
tended to the smallest doi1l she was
ever gracious 10 the autograph hends'
by whom Ia late years she was much
sought Her Cltsklll home a. Twilight
park was their haunt an summtr Ions
but no matter how lusy or wcary sh'
was. the lmportunates usually got
what they wanted. One morning. while
Lady Henry Somerset and Siss VII
lard we're engaged "a entertaining visit
ors az the cottage @ man presented
himself % the cottage with no other
excuse than the autograph book under
his arm. but with the utmost courtesy
Miss willard dropped everything In
scribed her name as desired. rorsuad-
ed Lady Somerset TO do the same. aad
then. Instead Of sending the took out
by the maid took II herself TO the
stranger. Miss WIZARDS belief In love
and In the power Of Lore was bound
less. when asked for a motto for a
girls club some years ago she gave
the following: Nothing IL ineEoTable
but love"
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

So far a. the most recent statistics
go. the known proportion Of blind peo-
pie Is about one In 1900. which would
give a total Of one million blind In
the world. The largest proportion 10
found In Russia, which has in Eu-
rope 100000 blind in a population Of
$4,000 900. or one In $50. Most OF these
are found in the northern provinces Of
Finland. and the principal cause Is
ophthalmla. due to bad ventilation Of
the huts OF the peasaniry and the In
adequate facilities for treatment. There
IL a great deal Of blindness In Egypt.
due TO glowing sand.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
nR. MARY wAlKER,s ATTIRE.
Glad She stack 10 Trousers In spite Of
All Jtidlsuie.

fttad she stuck tn NFnussHs " "Fit' ~
All Jsidirule.
Dr. Mary Walker. the famous little
Washington physician. is always
source OF wonder 10 women who meet
her because she wears without embar-
rassment and has worn for years mas
cullne attire. Among those who know
her the matter has ceased 70 be sub
Jet Of remark Long ago. when she
entered the army as a surgeon with the
rank Of FIRST lieutenant she put on
uniform like the other officers Of her
rank. She got a medal from congress
for active military duty She likes her
trousers. She often hears unkind re-
marks about her clothes but she
doesn't Worry. because she figures that
only ill-bred people would do 80 and
about ill-bred people she cares little.
It's great relief she thinks. for
woman 10 wear what will avoid annoy
ance ln any form. It's fine thing TO
arrive In a strange city and not have
some man annoy you with his atten-
/ lions simply because you are a woman
and alone She has often been taken
[ FOR a Catholic priest or Protestant min
| lister One time she couldn't convince
a minister from Atlanta this was 10
l Washington she wasn't Brother
Brown" often young girls have tried
20 dirt with her and women shocked
| her just because ihCy took her for o
man. when women ask her why sho
doesn't wear clothes like them she says
she hasn't them and asks them 10 send
her some They don't. though A wo-
man once asked her II she'd send her
skirt would she wear b an she did.
The doctor said she would. Shed hold
q 70 a. she ala. 30 Il wouldn't inter
fero with her walking. but she'd have
her trousers on under 10 20 as much
% her legs a. her wOuld-be friends
wouldn't show. The doctor hasn't any
particular tailor when she has plen.
" Of money she has her clothes made
20 order AZ other times she buys them
ready made. and has only 10 have The
sleeves shortened and that 10 because
her shoulders are narrower than most
mems She never has kept track Of
how many pairs % trousers she wear,
out In a year but says her work a not
hard on clothes. and she l. careful oi
them.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Nlneiy-nine women In hundred
making sandwiches FOR company eX.
pec.ed IN the evening. aud wanting
them crus,less. will cut the crust on
after slclug the bread. Take a whole
loaf Of bread. cut the sides and top
crust on. leaving the bottom crust on.
Then. having squared on one end.
spread on your deyiled ham. sardis g
paste or whatever. and cut a thin slice
back % the bottom crust Release the
slice by running your knife down just
inside the bottom crust Then neither
the bread nor your meat Is crgmpled.
New York World
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
quite Eteusabie.

Harpor's Round Table prints the FOL.
lowing note resolved by a city school
teacher from the mother Of one Of her
pupils. "Plese eXcooze Henry FOR abb
sents yesterday. Him and me got a
chance to ride to funeral In a char
rige. an let him stay TO home. a. he
had never rode In charrige an never
went TO funeral nor had many other
measures. SO plese excooze."
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

W. s. Gilbert wanted Ave thousand
dollars as damages because a London
paper said he was given to pomposity,
envy and ingratltude. and the jury
disagreed. Mr.. Gilbert satirizes men.
women and ideas rather more than any
other man. and Il is not reasonable
that he should be sensitive to that sort
OF thing as applied TO himself. 1t re-
minds one OF the generous lad who
said to his companion. Let us play
] will hit you with = club and you will
back up against the fence and cry"
'Tbe suggestion that those who give
should be willing TO take would evil
IDENTIFY come to Mr.. Gilbert as a new
proposition.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
smiling 10th rnrile..

Poor wife Cto husband, whoa, loud
snoring keeps her awakel-"Charlie.
Charlie do stop snoring Turn over on
your side" tNudges him. Husband,
only half awake. grunls. turns on his
side. and continues 10 snore. wife b.
a happy idea. Remembers line from
an article. How 10 Prevent Snoring
Gives her husband o second nudge,
which Gillette acottc Erurt Oh. Char
lie. II you'd keep your mcu.h shut you d
be an right" Charlie tsemi-conscious)
so would YOU" Punch.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Al the recent celebration OF his
elghty-third birthday Prince Bismarck
walked with the help OF gold-handled
cane that was given him by the pres
ent emperor. Those who saw him thus
supported may well have thought Of
the fateful days when the first En-
peror william leaned on Bismarck as
on a strong stafi. and by tina, aid was
enabled TO walk sturdily along uniried
and perllous paths to the imperial
throne.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

A correspondent OF the New York
Press believes that II the clergy united
In prayer to that end God would sink
every Spanish war vessel 1t Ia well
10 have faith, but II IL safer to keep
your powder dry. Suppose, for In
stance. the Spanish should pray the
Almighty TO sink all OF our navy!
Why would not the efficacy Of suppl
cation be as great in one case as In the
other?
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
The Turn of Iifa.

Tho cessation % TIE msnsei Usually cc.
cnfa between the Agea % forty and City.
Great ifFrgulnniy take place in The peucdic
dirchargea for some time bcfofe The inI
Cesaaiion, the female usually etpsugucirg
sudden fasheasf heat, fulinesa ~ thf heacs
headache and other evidences % crlfi a.
tonai disturbance. Tie nsffour system
Observation-Disclosures and thsft b. gIeat
irrt.hiliiy and melancholy, INC patent "a
discoufAgcd and has = Ecnse VI iulintiaor
nunuf alton.
~ 10 time In her life does 4 woman reed
more constant care aud WaichiGi tender
ncss. nor has more need for remedy 70
invgofAte and strengthen her. The towels
should BE- Kept regular With Dr. ~, n. sifn.
mons Liver Medicine. and II DF. simmons
equaW Vine Wine h used drfng the whole
Of this critical period. u will ihvigofaif ADD
enrich her blood. soOthe and strengthen her
nerves aEd thus relieve the suffering ana
enable her 20 pass safely through TIRE Jan.
ger, prol0ng her lie and afford Der strength
And 10Y IN her declining years.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Jack tenderly. to the little brother
Of his adored onel would you like 10
know a secret. Tommy Tommy
should think would" Jack-"Well,
I'm in love with your sister Tommy
oh, that's no secret. The family
has talked about II every day since
Aunt Emma promised Nell that she'd
bring about an introduction"
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Muncie and Richmond. Indiana. are
preparing 10 try the Pingree lot-garden
scheme this year on q more extensive
scale and systematic basis than any
city In Indiana has yet attempted.
Richmond has been experimenting
along these lines for the last three
years-not individually, but as city.
and under city management. The re-
suits have been wonderful. The poor
Of the city have thus been employed
and have raised enough each year 20
take them through the winter with
plenty OF food. The city council has
just voted an appropriation Of several
hundred dollars 10 carry on the early
spring preliminary work. and citizens
are pledglng their vacant lots 10 the
clty-not TO individuals. More than
$50 lots will be given over to that pur-
pose this spring and the city superin-
tendent. who is appointed by the mayor
and paid by the city. Is now entering
the names OF those who want the gar
dens and assigning them 10 certain
lots. Only the poor need apply and the
amount OF ground given Is regulated by
the sire OF the family. The ground Is
broken and prepared by the city, and
the city. through the government pro-
vides all OF the seed. All that Is re-
CURED Of the poor is TO plant. TIL and
care for the ground and harvest the
crops. The city superintendent super
vises all OF this work. and II be finds
that n man is negligent he will appoint
Others 20 attend 10 the work and reap
the reward. This system costs the
city something. but the cost IL slight
when compared with savings In the
long winter months when such de-
mands were made on charity.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

The frequent difficulty In balancing
account books has been solved. accord
ing to the Chicago Post. by the treas
urer Of a woman's club. who explains
her system thus: Il Just add up what
! have received. and substract from
that what have paid out, 90 show
what IL due the club. and then ! make
my husband give me a check for the
amount" Unfortunately many expa-
trlated cashiers have no husbands.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

The Detroit woman who offered TO
nip a cent with her husband TO see
whether the two should separate has
fhe right idea. why the cost and scan
daI Of such cases In court when the
simple separation IL the one thing de-
sired? Legality? Well, did any d.
yorced parties ever have any respect
for thatg
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

A man In New York gave his girl
two brand new front teeth az we'd
ding gift. TO an up the gap as he
expressed II. Directly the two separ-
ated. and then. on the highway, he
tried to pluck the teeth from the gap,
and the magistrate before whom he
was taken fined him ten dollars for IL.
The proprieties Of life ought to be re-
spected. Only a stingy man would
have limited his generosity to two
teeth. He should have given her a fu.l
set, a wig, and cork leg.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
A Recommendation.

Boston Transcript. Mrs. Green
(who thinks Of biring) But is the girl
honest? Can she be trustedl Mrs.
Brown Cthe girls former mistress) -
You need not be In the least alarmed.
She Is perfectly honest. All tho time
she was with me never knew her to
take a thing not even my advice az
10 how things should be done.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
DUTIES OF CHRISTIAN LIFE.
No Virtue In ones Daily Actions Unless
Established In the soul


The obligations and duties Of the
Christian lie are no, all external"
writes Cardinal Gibbons. pointing out
a religious life 20 young men. In the
Ladies' Home Journal They are
mainly material and must proceed
from the heart There IL no virtue IN
ones daily actions unless II be FIRST
established in the soul. and Is only
an external expression Of the souls
convictions or pro'ongation % heart
felt sentiments. Yet the external prac-
tlce Of Christian virtues and the per-
Torrance Of Christian duties pertain
TO the integrity n not 20 the essential
character Of Christian life. The in
terror sentiments soon perish without
external expression. as life and bodily
powers become extinct without due
and proper exercise or employment
However. as the external duties are
not absolutely and under all clrcum-
stances essential. they vary both IN
number and frequency. according to
environments and opportunities. A
business man cannot do all things that
a clergyman Is expected to do. a man
In trade not what a man In leisure
can accomplish. nor man Of the world
all that Is possible and easy TO one
who keeps himself from society. But
all. no matter where. no matter what
their engagements. and secular pur-
suits. how little or how much time
they an call their own. can and arc
Obliged 10 perform daily acts Of prayer
and religion. and accomplish many
duties Of virtue and charity. There
Is no condition Of life which is lnccm-
pstible with the dictates and prla-
clples and precepts % the Christian
life"
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

While II + quite true that the pro-
porion of deaths from malaria a. IN
Immediate cause Is proporfionali,
SMALL. 80 pAyssians are thoroughly
convinced that u causes maladies Of
a fatal character. and begcis danger
ous nervous prostration. This malady
Is eradleaied and prevented by Hoe
irifers Stomach B.tiers
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
sponeinr Around.

Bramhlc-The theory that women
have no sense OF humor Is wrong.
Wesley How do you explain ~
Bramble Whenever Aunt Susan comes
to make us one Of her long visits my
wife fairly compela ms to live on sponge
cake.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Old gentleman tat his daughters
weddlng)-"My dear, don't see how I
can get along without you" Bride
Never mind. pa Since the ceremony
was performed my husband has con-
fessed that he has not enough saved 10
20 housekeeping so you may not lose
me. after an. Punch.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Mr.. Croker will do bis part OF the
fghsing with Spain on the racing
grounds Of England; but az TO his
struggle with Hill he will leave orders
and fight by substitute.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Family Friend--'1 congratulate you.
my dear cir. on the marriage Of your
daughter see you are gradually get
ting all the girls OF your hands" Old
Olive Branch-"On my hsnds-yes!
But the worst Of II Is have to keep
their husbands on their feet. Tit
Bits.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

The value Of the instruments and
machinery exported from the United
States during 1897 for scientific pur-
poses was ss.O54.l55. which was an in
crease Of $4,000 as compared with
the exports In 1896.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

THE woman who swoons has passed
out" says a lady. We have long had
a feeling OF respect for the woman who
lndulges in the good. old-fashioned
faint and no fuss or airs about II.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Ted-"IIow In the world can you
think Of getting married when you're
broker"
New-"why, shouldn't broken things
be pllcedy"-Truih.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Little Johnny opened his drum 10
nnd out where the noise came FROM"
ibid he find out7" Yes when his
father came home the noise came from
little Johnny"-Tit- Bits.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

There's a man who has been In this
country thirty years. and still he can't
speak English" We'll. know people
who have been here all their lives and
are In the same fx."-Philadelphla
North American.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

II wish could remember what Lo-
bella told me to order when came
down town this morning" said Mr.. Ne
Swat. 1T was either tea set or a
settee. but which one OF the two II
was / can't call to mind to save my
llfe."-Chicago Tribune.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

No North or South. no East or West.
no parties or half parties; but the UNI
Ion a unit for free Cuba and the Mon
roe doctrine In lis broadcast sense. No
more Wholesale starvation. no more
white slavery. no more foreign govern
ment control of anything or anybody
on this continent.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

England can never be considered an
ally Of ours while her army continues
10 blow African savages from The
mouths Of her cannons.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Again has Spain demonstrated her
pre-emlnence In diplomacy. She drop
ped Il FIRST
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

II Is confidently asserted that during
this little scushe tea, coffee and breath
will be untaxed.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

4 voman'f understanding has a
great deal % 90 with her ideas c.
drc1a reform.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

Mr.. Ricketts-some scientists cay
that kissing is dangerous. Do you
think SOL Miss KlttIsh-It Is likely to
produce palpitatIon Of the heart,-Tit-
Bits.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
tiOOh - TITS pills. AID Digestion Il
ARKANSAS LADIES
DON'T III.
MucMSHUNS&.,ryv

Malvern. Ak, saFfi Have
usssi d.. ". A.simnons
Liver Medicine % yeafs,
ard ind ita Trraf c6al
BITTER than "lsliina
Regulator" and " Hlack
Dfaught" Il has iiecn n
great lcucfttnmy naugh-
tcf and Niece during their
monthly troubles for OBJ
stfustssi McBstTuation.
ThsTe should - ~ Lone
without H.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18
ORR grnuit @nple.
BRYAN. TEXAS

You canno; Judge a mans religion
By tie condition Of bis front yard.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

After cleaning plated goods. a final
rubbing with tissue paper viii very
much Improve the polish.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

In Baltimore a horse i!ed a few days
ago aged forty ycara.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

w t-hAf lhF iliiN tsufs
Guaranteed tobacco habit rura. makas Esak
uen strong biooi pure Soc % Anirassais.
The Bryan daily eagle. (Bryan, Tex.) 1895-1898, 1898-05-18

II Is impossible TO run at an sltl
tude OF 1900 feet above the ssa
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1898-03-04
ment. is denied in high official quar-

ment, is denied IN high official quar-
tiers.
KEY WEST, Fla, March Capt
Hanlon, of the steamer Mascotte, which
arrived from Havana Wednesday night,
says that when the vessel left Havana
there was no signs of impending riot
or of an anti-American demonstration.
On the contrary everything was nor
mally quiet.
HAVANA, March 3.-The wrecking
tug l. J. Merritt, of the Merritt &
Chapman Wrecking and Dredging Co.
commanded by Capt. D. A. WOlcOtt, ar
rived here from New York Wednesday
morning and later in the day she
moved a barge near the wreck and
commenced work.
Fred. J. Sharp is here in charge for
the company. The Merritt is a power
full boat. but another and bigger tug is
expected here shortly. The Right Arm
will probably remain as long as she
can be useful.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1898-03-04
INTERSTATE COMMERCE.
Commission Holds Sessions in Cleveland,
GA Merchant Makes Complaint Againse
Car Service Co.

Commission Holds Sessions in Cleveland,
GA Merchant Makes Complaint Againse
Car Service Co.
CLEVELAND, O., M arch 3.-The inter.
state commerce commission, repre-.
sented by Judge Charles A. Prouty, OF
Vermont, began Wednesday an inquiry
into the complaint of H. M. Strauss, a
commission merchant, that the Cleve-
land Car Service association, which in
cludes all the railroads entering the
city except one, is discriminating
against small shippers IN favor of big
ones. j. j. McAuliff, of Washington,
the commissioners official stenOg-
rapher, was in attendance. JAS. ID.
Yeomans, of Iowa, member of the
commission. will attend the hearing if
possible before it's close.
Lewis Williams, manager of the
Cleveland Car Service association, was
the first witness. He had hardly taken
the stand when discussion arose upon
the request of the compliments that
the association books and records dat
ing back to November Is, 1889, be
brought before the commissioner.
Williams subsequently testified that he
did not object to producing the books.
He said that association records were
open.
The testimony of Aaron Goodman
and H. NJ. Simmons, former employees
of the Car Service association, was
taken. 1t was to the effect that the
association strictly enforces upon the
small shippers rule imposing ware
house charges for allowing goods to
remain in cars, unlOaded longer than
specified time, while no such charge
is made upon the heavy shippers.
The Strauss hearing is in measure
a test case. Further proceedings in
the other instances will depend some
what on the decision in the Strauss
case. 1t is an open secret that the
smaller shippers hope that the end of
the matter will be that interstate
commerce commission will dissolve
car associations throughout the coun-
try.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1898-03-04
Believe the Court of Inquiry
Will Find
That the Maine Disaster Was Caused
Blu the Explosion
Ola Floating Submarine Mine Under
Port Side of Vessel Forward.
Wrecking Tug Merritt and Barge Clearing
Away the Debris-In a Few Days All
Above the Water Will Have Been Re-
moved-An Quiet ip Havana.

KEY WEST, Fla, March AL the
Names dead that remain unburied
will be laid to rest in Key West.
Orders to this effect were received
from the navy department and the
coast survey boat Bache will bring
here any bodies found. Fifty collins
have been ordered from Key West I'M
dertal1ers
Officers and men of the Maine were
examined Monday. The members of
the board of inquiry, after taking tes-
timOny of these men, will return to
Havana to complete their work.
They may be ready to return by We'd
nesday or Thursday. Divers are work
ing on the Maine all the time. When
the beard returns to Havana the result
of the divers work will be laid before
them.
HAVANA, March Little work was
done Monday by the divers from the
tug Right Arm. Capt. MCGEE, who is
in charge. seems to lack authority from
the wrecking people or others, and is
indisposed to work on his own judg-
ment except in smaller details.
Capt Sigsbee thinks Spain has a
moral and international right to make
an independent examination, and he
viii give the Spanish divers such facili-
ties as are possible.