davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-23

have you. and Jest the same as ac-
cepted you'll"
20! No, no! merely made some In
Quiries!" he replied.
Then Inquiries was about love, sir
and my heart's n-thumpin away like
all git out. said I'd marry again, and
I Will We are engaged. When do you
want me to be ready?"
Madam, you have totally mIsunder-
stood me-" explained the young man, as
he turned all sorts OF colors and APP
peared to grow small. 81 asked you a
few questions out of curiosity"
"Mebbe the jury will call II curiosity
and mebbe they won't" she said, as she
set her Jaw.
"They don't allow no foolIn' round in
Posey county When feller goes as
fur az you hey IT'S hitch or damages.
I'm trembiin' all over like girl, an
my hearts a-tryln' to jump out. It's
regular love, or don't know the road
hum. You don't leave here, young man,
till this case Is settled"
but, ma'am. you Soc"
81 don't know nuthin' but marriage or
damages. You've asked me to have you.
1 said would. VIII you marry or
settler"
"How-how much?" he Gaspcd, as he
looked around and failed to find any
sympathy.
Wall Saginaw salt is dollar and a
quarter bar'l," she replied. as she
glanced at a row Of barrels down the
platform. IT guess the oxen kin git hum
with two har'is Make Il two and III
call 1t sQuur."
Everybody grinnsd except the young
man. He realized that he was done for,
and got out Of the box by planking
down the $3.50 to the agent. The cart
was driven around to the spot, the bar
rels loaded up. and then the woman
came back to say to the young man:
1--WE settled this case. and the salt Is
in the cart. and Jest want to remark
that II you happen this way agIn, and
you happen to feel so awfully cunnin'
that you can't held yourself. you'd bet
ter go slow on wldders. Thar's sixteen
Of us round here, an I've all drive yell
Ter oxen hltched to carts, an we all go
b'arfoot IN the summer and sigh to get
married agin. The reE'lnr fgger is three
bar'ls of shlt and pound Of tea, but
OWN to your youth and that thunder
storm commin' UP, I've let you on easy
Good day, bub; good day, all!"-New
York Herald.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-23

porch continued in bllssful ignorance
Of the situation. The young man an
swered her In monosyllables. HIS
thoughts were all on his hair. But she
kept up lively chatting, and appar-
emily did not notice how distract he
was.
Pretty soon the girls mother came
out on the porch. Now, he wanted to
make good impression upon the girls
mother. Yet he didn't rise. He didn't
bow. He didn't even nod. 1t was too
duslSy to see the faces OF the ladies. but
he knew they regarded his as n first
class boor He grOaned lnwardly and
pulled on the Varnlsh until he felt as II
scalped.
The elder lady said very Htde, and
what she said had an ley flavor, The
young woman made brave effort to
draw the visitor cut. and she soon saw
that II was no use. Silence ensued.
The youth knew It was time for him to
so. Yet he didn't stir. He wondered
what the night Waterman would say
when he saw him sitting there in the
early morning hours.
Then he knew he must speak up.
excuse me-" he said, "but-but do
you-that is, could you lend me this
chair-just long CROUCH TO take 1t
homer"
"sir?" said the elderly lady. She
probably thought he was intoxicated,
81 am in earnest" said the youth,
dlsmaliy. never was more In earnest
In my life. find that can't go home
without the chair. and, Of course, /
can't stay here all night-at least. don't
want to, and"
What is the matter?" family in
quired the young woman.
81 think" said the youth gravely, II
think 1t is varnIsh--but really can't
look to see"
Dear mel" cried the elderly lady.
Are you stuck fast?"
Il am" said the youth.
''Wh-where?" gasped the young wo-
man.
"My haIr." said the youth.
what a shame" cried the young
woman in relieved tone.
TITS dreadful" echoed the old lady.
So then they got at him and the old
lady found some lInseed oil and soft
eued up the varnlsh, and the young
woman got the cutest little pair Of
scissors and cut off few particularly
stubborn locks and they fused over
him until the young man reluctantly
gave d little sharp pull and was free
And now, madam" he said TO the
elderly lady, will you permit me TO
make amends for my late irciviiity?"
And he shook hands with her ard made
his best bow, and the old lady was de-
lighted. And everybody felt so pleas
ant that the young man stayed q full
half hour longer
But he sat In another chair.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-23
ATEXT MAI REFLEcTD,
But the Preacher Said That he Meant |"
Insinuotion.

/ uul lllG ETGuGUGT Oat0 uuob W. "'SS "
InsinuOtion.
Weekly Telegraph; In the earlier dnH
of Methodism, when the itInerant syi'
TEN was more prevalent than now !
very stout minister. was deputed 70
preach on a Sunday morning In The
old-fashloned chapel OF a small Cor
nlsh village. The congregation had as
sembled, when the parson mounted the
pulpit stairs and found to his horT@
that the door was too narrow to admit
him. He retired in confusion to 'He
vestry amid the audible amusement o.
the audience. and the stewards event
ually decided that access to the puIpN
should be obtained by means OF Two
chairs, zone placed inside and one o0''
side q the pulpit. This was done ana
at the end OF the service the exit wa V.
arranged In the same manner at'e' 'u'
congregation had departed, -,
on the evening OF the same "a! ~
minister who was appointed to preach
was rs amuslngly thin as the prt"N",ii
earlier IN the day had been stout S's
his attenuated appearance eXelts1 ~.
goodideal OF subdued comment ana Wv
tiers of5nmusement among the peop,S'
which eliminated in the anuounCs,'a,.s%s,
OF the text. The minister assured NV
stewards atterwarl that he knew hV ~,
ing OF the Incident Of the morning, Va W.
he had selected for the theme o. ~. M
Discourse. He that enteretb rot pE ' nv
door into the shcepfold. but climetn u
FoTe other way. the same Is thle' AZ"
n rohl,arW
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-23
HAD AN OLD DISEASE.


l
The mercury In the Thermometer had
dropped Off a point or two. and the air
responded to 1t with an effect of resllI-
ence on the spirits of the average hui
man being which made all the world
seem less Hike the other place where
good Americans don't go when ihey die.
Notwithstanding all this. the man in
the northwest corner OF green car No.
1853, coming down Capitol hill showed
signs OF depression.
whats the matter with you?" In
Qulred a friend who came aboard at B
street and got a place beside him.
my wife has punomania," replied the
man, gloomily.
"Pneumoaia! What is she doing with
pneumonia now, when she's got all VIM
ter and spring to have 1t in?"
Il said puDomania," corrected the
husband,
"Oh, excuse me. What's punomania?"
"The disease OF making puns."
"GeroOsalem!' exclaimed the last
man, "is 1t catching? II 1t is I'll send
my wife around, She never said a
funny thing in her life"
Neither did mine," sroaned the first
man.
why. I thought you said she made
punsS"
Il did. but that's no sign she says
funny things A pun once In thou
saEd years is eudurable, but as steady
diet puns are worse than the horrors OF
war. That reminds me. The other day
she asked me II Miles and ShRfter and
Wheeler, and some more OF that rank
were general officers who were particu-
lar officers, and before l could swallow
She asked me what the last era Of Span
ish defeat war. and when thought she
vas serious, and started TO tell her, she
give me the hoo-hR and said II was
Ctrv-era. Yesterday AT breakfast she
rald that Notwithstanding the war was
.ver in Cuba they were sighting there.
ard when failed to catch right on, she
asked me II ! didn't think there ought
10 be a colonel In the hull Of II ship in
stead OF a captain OF commodore. And
1t has been going on that way ever
Stree married her. The war only
makes II worse by giving her a greater
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-23
GO SLOW ON WIDOWS.



a score OF US were sitting In the shade
OF the depot building waiting for the
train, which was an hour late, when q
yoke OF oxen attached 10 a queer-lOOk-
ing old cart turned the corner. They
were driven by woman about fifty
years OF age, who wns barefoot and
wore mans straw hat.
cit mp thar. Buclt!" she exclaimed,
as she laid the "gad" on the OF OK with
n resonndlnE whack. You, thar, Pete,
what you sklttishun round that way
fur? Whoa, nowl Both OF yous stan
stili!"
She turned them up TO the platform,
threw down some hay taken from the
cart. and came up among us to inquire
Of the depot agent about n barrel Of
salt, He was busy lust then. and she
was waiting around. when tho smart
Alcck Of the crowd who wDs travelling
for wine house, remarked In tones
meant for her to ovcrhear:
II have always said II married at all
I'd marry woman who could drive
oxen"
rs that meant for mc?" she asked. as
she walked straight up TO him.
Are you a widow, ma'am2"
81 am Bin wldder ever since q saw
log rolled oyer Jim nine years ago.
And you'd marry again II you had
the opportunity. would your"
II would. when Jim lay n-dyln' IN
the house he told me to marry again II
! had a show"
"Ahcml GFec Gould you love sec
ond husband2'
III coald. II runs In our family to love,
We begin airy and keep II up to the
grave. what's your proposition? I'm
plain woman, full % blZncHs, and never
do any foolin'. II you've got anything
TO say. spit Il ont aforc 'cm ALL"
IL don't want 10 marry Just now"
he BlAinmered.
Don't Ell? Then what's the use OF
gcttin me on my tIptocs about II? You
man. you Jest the same as asked mo TO
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-23

field. Why, this morning, as I left the
house, she asked me for some money "
go shopping, and gave her hak a DOL.
lar. She objected 10 the amount, and
began TO argue, ard she snapped Oul
that 1t was money that talked, and
when snapped back and wanted y
know what II talked, she said It talked
cents: at least mine did, and then shA
went back into the house and ! CANE
away wondering what in thunder sal
meant by that All I've got to say y
groaned the victim. that you ought .
thank heaven for s-nding you vie
vho isn't so darned smart"
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-23
Why be Nea ,ucetl Inc Distance.

A Prospect Mc). Correspondent con-
tributes this account OF the discomflt'
ure at a would-be smart young lawyer
who finally, in case of assault and bat
terry, asked an old man OF the vicinity
at what distance he WAS from the par
ties when the assault happened.
''Just four feet Ave inches and hall, y
answered the witness.
"How came You to be so exact?" ask
ed the counsel.
Because expected some fool or other
to ask me and so measured it."-Au-
R1IRtA CMe,), Journal.
The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-23
Stuck EAsI IOA CHAIR.
Luckily this Youth was Fastened BY His
Hair, Not BY his Cloths.

Cleveland Plain Dealer: A society
youth had rather unpleasant time Of
It on an East End porch a few even
ings ago. The people Of the house have
been making general renovation of
the premises, outside and In. and
among other improvements painted and
Vanished the porch chairs One of
these chairs. It was one with wicker
back, was chosen by the youth as his
resting place. and he found 1t very
comfortable one. Pretty soon. however.
the heat OF his head with It's thick
ndornment, softened up the Varnish and
he suddenly discovered 20 his dire dis
may that his hair was firmly stuck fast
to the chair. He pulled gently. but 1t
wouldn't let so. He pulled little
harder, It was stu Arm. He gave p
Jerk and the tears filled his eyes. But
the varnish held on for dear life.
OF course the young woman on the
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26
> Long Staple Cotton.

A report from Cuero regarding
the new long staple cotton gin in
operation there is as follows:
The ''long staple cotton gin"
shipped here from England, which
is under the management and
control of the government agent,
Mr., w. S. Stevens of Charleston,
S. c., is now in. operation at
Messrs. H. Runge IL Co.'s gin.
The gin, known as the Mozart
ney Single Action Cotton Gin" is
manufactured at Bolton, England,
and furnished to the government
by the Bailey-Lebby company Of
Charleston, S. c., is that used
almost exclusively in Egypt. II
consists of a roller, covered with
leather, either in solid washer or in
strips fastened to wood. against
which is pressed a fixed knife
The cotton thrown into the hopper
and falling is seized by the friction
of the leather and is drawn between
the fixed knife and leather surface
While this is taking place there il
a beater knife which is recipro
Gated at considerable speed anC
which strikes the seed attached tt
the, cotton drawn away by thu
leather roller. The detached seeC
will then fall through grid
provided for that purpose. TIL
cotton is constantly fed to tn
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26
Good to Eat.

1t has been demonstrated that
the GAZETTE is not only good to
read but is also good to eat. Mr..
Trautwein came up town Wednes-
day evening and got his GAZETTE
out of the post Office and laid it in
a basket which he was carrying.
He then walked down to the gin
where he had to feed some stock
before he went home. Going to
the feed pen he set the basket Just
inside the fence and went inside.
When he got through with his
work he came out and started to
pick up his basket, when he no.
ticed that his paper was gone. He
looked around and saw the last of
it just going down the throat of an
odd brindle COW which was stand
ing just outside the fence. She
had run her tongue through a
crack in the fence and gobbled up
the paper Mr.. Trautwein said,
II grabbed up fence rail and
tried to smash her but she backed
off and actually winked at me.
She was licking her chops like she
had eaten something mighty good.
When l got home my wife had to
go over to the neighbors and borrow
a paper"
The GAZETTE is still only dol
lar year.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26

that he was on the grand jury
which had indicted defendant. Il
was decided that he was disquali-
fled and was consequently excused.
The defendant entered a plea of
former jeopardy in his appeal after
conviction on that trial, but the
Court of Appeals reversed the case
on other grounds and did not pass
upon that point. The attorneys
for defendant presented their argu-
ments yesterday before Judge
Winter. They maintained that
Burris was in jeopardy when he
was arraigned before the jury in
the trial of November, 1896, with
Kendric as juror, and when Ken
dric was excused and another Juror
sworn in it was another arraign.
ment and placed him in jeopardy a
second time. Judge Winter sus-
tanned the plea and discharged the
defen dant.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26
A MoCKERY.
Texas Criminal Law.

AT Waco last week a man named
Burris was set at liberty after
being convicted four times.
Burris was charged with high
way robbery two wears ago last
October, Allison Harrison, the
assistant postmaster, being the
victim. The robbery was com
mitted in the business center Of
the city and the robbers were cap
tured soon afterward in saloon.
Lou Moore, now serving a life term
in the penitentiary for the murder
of Deputy Sheriff Tate of Dallas,
was Burris' pal on this occasion
and was convicted and given nine
years. Burris has been tried four
times and convicted each time.
The case was reversed once and
the verdict in each of two other
convictions was set aside and a
new trial given. The last trial,
which was concluded last Saturday,
resulted in conviction and five
year term, whereupon Burris
attorneys applied FOR writ Of
habeas corpus asking for his re-
lease on the ground that he had
been placed in jeopardy before the
last trial.
The former jeopardy plea il
+ based upon the fact that in thu
| trial of the case the third time, il
I November, 1896, one of the juror
who had been accepted, sworn nnC
empanneled to try the case, wa
/ excused and another juror wa
sworn in his stead. James NJ
| Kendric, the juror discharged
5 arose at the conclusion of the read
ing of the indictment and state,
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26

roller by the action of an, auto
matte feeder, also with reciprocal
motion. The production is from
seventy-fve to eighty pounds of
clean cotton per hour. Three
horse power being sufficient to run
the gin at full speed.
w. H. Wentworth, the gentle
man who has labored for years to
introduce long staple cotton in
Southwest Texas and at whose re-
quest this experimental test is now
being made, has about 1000 pounds
of Egyptian cotton, together with
the hybrid Of his own creation that
is being put through the gin. above
described
The cotton when ginned shows a
long silky fibre, measuring from
one and +. one-quarter to one and
one-half inches in length, some
what resembling mohair or cash
mere wool.
A number of citizens and farmers
are present and there is decided
interest manifested in the test.
Mr.. Pittocksof the Agricultural
and Mechanical college of Bryan
Texas, is present ard taking the
data to be used in report that
will shortly appear relative to the
test now in progress.
When it is thoroughly demons
trated that the production of long
staple cotton will pay in this sec
ton, the problem of low priced
cotton will doubtless be solved anC
instead Of the planter realizing :
to 5 cents for his cotton crop
double or three times this sum vii
be obtained and Mr.. Wentworth
will have his reward for the pro
gress and enterprise he has evinceC
, in 80 perseveringly keeping thi
question before the public.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26

"Boss, l dun spent dat money
wot you gimme, and if you wants
to be 'lected for sho, you's got to
put UP some mo-" Colorado
county election talk.-Weimar
Mercury,
1t also sounds very much like
Lavaca county election talk. The
papers all over the country should
wage war on this iniquity, per-
puade candidates to stand on their
honor and make Negro politicians
90 to work. II lies in the power
of the press to do a good work here
and it should not be neglected.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26

The chances are that Eugene
Burt will never hang. A fool of a
Judge, named Brooks, granted him
stay last Thursday and he will
be tried for insanity some time
next spring. The judge should be
lynched and Burt roasted by a
slow fire. The crime with which
he stands charged is the murder OF
his wife and two babies.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26
Eor Constable, Precinct Mo-. s..

We are authorized to announce
H. J. STAMINA, of Sweet Home, as
u candidate for Constable of Pre-
cinct No. 3, subject to the action of
the Democratic party.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26
Henry Krause of Moulton passed
through here Monday on his way
to Gonzales on business.
BaIIard,s Horehound svrrp

ing drugs, but is scientifically pr, :.
prred remedy that cures coughs and
colds, and all throat and lung troub-
les Its action is quick, prompt and
positive. 2Ss, & soc. For sale by
AUa, GRAVE.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26
Billiards. Snow Imminent

Will cure Lame Back, Sore Throat,
Wounds, Sprains, Bruises, Cuts, Oid
Sores. Ladies, it will cure your
back-ache. For sale by
AUG, GRAVE.
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26

Mrs. S. L. Townsend of Yoakum
died Friday from the effects of an
over dose ofmorphine, taken aeei-
dentally,
Shiner gazette. [volume] (Shiner, Tex.) 1893-current, 1898-01-26
For Tax Collector,
E. F. RUHMANN.
ANTON BERKOFSKY.

For JUSTICE OF IHt FeaCe' FIoCIINI
No. 8.
We are authorized to announce
FRANK STAMINA, SR., of WED, as a
candidate for Justice of Precinct
No. 3, subject to the action of the
Democratic party.
The age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1897-1902, 1898-11-26

postoffices was 1900, against $1,000 with
in this period the postage has increased
about 80 per cent, while the postal business
has multiplied nearly threefold. The gem
eral increase of expenditures for the past
year has been little more than the preeed-
Ing one. There was an increase in postal
receipts Of nearly six and one-half million
dollars over the aggregate Of 1897, which is
cited as a proof the country is again pros
porous. The estimate of revenues and ex-
penditures for the fiscal year ending June
30, 1900 follows:
Total estimated revenue 800, 95S ,112 es-
timated expenditures, $105 224 900; deficiency
for 1900, estimated. A,265,SSS. But for the
gross abuse of second-class matter privi-
leges the deficit would have disappeared
long ago, and its present and promised de-
crease is in the face of this abuse.
Discussing rural free delivery the post
master-general says replies to circulars
sent out suggest some assurances of the
permanence of the service. A revision and
Encouragement of the service established
prior to 1897 is contemplated.
The most marked advance in volume of
system was the past Year. increase being
100000 in number, S16000,000 in money
carried. There were 2S.753. 412 money orders
Issued face value, $204 ,S91. Legislation
is asked for at the next session of congress
to correct the evils growing out of the ex-
listing system of speculative bidding for
star route service There were 15,600,22)
pieces of mail matter registered at the post
offices during the year.
Among the recommendations for legisla-
ton are those to make depredations of rail-
way postal clerks a continuous offense: to
provide a severe penalty for employees en-
bezzling or destroying newspaper mail;
severer statutes covering green goods and
obscene matter: the issue of a special
stamped envelope of superior paper quail
ity for ten cents for greater security and
safety for at least curtailing the use of
postage stamps a medium of exchange
and for allowing postmasters of the second
classes to paw for the special delivery of
letters by saaried postal officials and to al
low car fare to special delivery messengers
in the great cities
The age-herald. [volume] (Birmingham, Ala.) 1897-1902, 1898-11-26

dies of the town reception at the home
of Judge and Mrs a. J. Driver, which was
an unrivaled social success in every way.
Judge Drivers home was beautifully deco
rated and nothing was spared to render
the occasion delightful. Music was furnish
ed by Mike Roses band, of Columbus An
elaborate repast was served. Thirty-hve
couples were present. of whom the follow
ing were visitors: Misses Olive and Carrie
Dent, Messrs. cliff Glover and Aubrey
Fuller, of Newman. Ca: Misses Susie
Reed and Lita Clark, of Opeika; Mr.. r.
II. Boyd, Camp HILL
new court house for Lafayette is only
a question of a few months. Plans will be
submitted at the next meeting of the coun-
ty commissioners early In December The
present Chambers county court house was
built in 1885, The new court house. which
is badly needed, will be a handsome
structure, to cost between twenty-five and
thirty thousand dollars. After six years of
stagnation under populist rule, this step in
the interest of progress is taken by the
...w democratic administration Of county
affairs. a..