The Saint Paul globe., 1898-07-23

"One-Eyed" Connolly will not become
member of the Salvation Army-at least not
the st. Paul end of the army. He tried to
enlist himself the other evening at the meet
ing that was being held in front of Schune-
man & Evans. He told the captain of the
band that he felt something stirring him to
join and he volunteered to tell what he hoped
might happen to him if he were allowed to
wish his sins away in water. He was told
to 90 on, but as soon he started the pri-
yate who beats the bass drum hit 1t a few
thumps and then somebody started to pray.
Mr.. Connolly made several false starts and
was always headed off. He got even when
the time came to take up the collection. The
mob was urged to contribute something for
the good of the work-to throw a coin or
two onto the head of the drum Mr. Con-
nelly had friend with him:
Hand me quarter till l chip" whispered
Connolly to the friend. The friend handed
over the coin. Mr. Connolly very dexterously
slipped his fingers into his pocket and changed
the quarter for a dime. The smaller coin
he threw on the head of the drum.
Here, Connolly" said his friend, ''no fair
buncoin' me-"
Get out" returned Mr.. Connolly 'syou
didn't lose anything, but if that guy hadn't
been so wise the Lord would have been is
cents more ahead of the game.'
There was rumor about on Tuesday to
the effect that Admiral Dewey had fired upon
and sunk a German man-of-war. 1t, the
rumor, finally penetrated into the city hall.
Capt. Gallick met an Irish policeman and
told him what he had heard.
Hist said the "copper" don't let that
get to the ears of the mayor, or he'll fire
every Mick on the force"
Ihere were enough prominent st. Paul men
IN the party which accompanied Gov. Clough
to the Omaha exposition, and also enough
rural state senators, so that no particular
individual need feel called upon to defend
himself in this case, but the story tat is
brought back from the Nebraska gates city
is as follows:
On the midway, as on all midways, there
is German village. one of the conventional
type, with picturesque bar maids, warriors
of heroic mould, Tyrolean warblers and beer,
served in the stein.
Two senators, and the st. Paul man, after
enjoying the very bad singing and perhaps
worse dancing of two young women whose
faces were evidently their chief reliance, al
though their neither limbs gave them some
tangible support, joined the bacchantes at a
table near the stage door. 1t was claret and
beer ard Rhine wine and seltzer and every
thing was going nicely when one of the SEN
ators said roses. and the word seemed to
cast spell over the feminine contingent A
messenger boy was summoned,s but on the
way he must have stopped to see the lagoon
Illuminated. or the sword swalower choke on
a chickenbone or something for by the time
he had returned the rural senator not so
rural, after all. had ducked, as the saying is.
The st. Paul man paid Tor the roses, but
ne murmured, in a tone of plaintive expos
tuiation:
It's bad enough to be taken in at all. l
could have stood it if it were Minne apolis
man, but did not think these ruralists had
it in them.'
Still, he found a chance to laugh at anoth-
er member of the executive party who is
credited with considerable erudtion, es e il
ly in the methods OF the legislative worker.
Tbs astute Minresctan dri,ted away from the
Minnesota party long enough to chase into
a fake museum on Sixteenth street. where
for ten cents the patrons regalsd with
some delectable visions Of tawdry chromos
and alleged wonders of more less
certain Value. The two chief features of the
place were a fascinating lecturer and d Ii
gent small boy to take tickets. After the
lecturer had finished showing the party
around, he informed the ladies and the
minors in sepulchral tones that they Were
through. However, the men, if they desired
to see 'our special b.ll,' might remain for
additional charge of Is cents. The men
stayed mostly.
Are you ready, Maud?' shouted the lee
turer, metamorDhosng into a stage man
ager with the easy grace Of an Omaha Ches-
terfeld.
From the depths back of cayernous cur
tain came in feminine voice, "Not quite
The crowd surged closer to the curta N:
eyes set forward in their sockets like pigs at
their matutinal trough. In a moment that
IN he
The curtain pulled aside.
Maud was ready.
and there was not wrinkle in her brand
new bicycle suit, either, that had not been
draped before the stage mirror.
The Philistine.