Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1898-07-20
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w neat went uOWH from 4l,Do to 94a
to-day. Mrs. Kirby-I thought you mon
didn't believe in bargain days.-Truth
Giles-I just heard that Hawkins re.
ferred to me as perfect idiot. Smiles
Oh, don't mind what Hawkins says; he
always exaggerates more or less.-C1l.
cago News.
you are the party l gave ten cents to-
yesterday. Beggar-I am, sir. Did you
think dime would make new man of
me?-Truth. o.
"Of course" observed the thin wheel.
man, water won't run up hill"
We'll" replied the fat wheelman, who
was still putting and blowing, Il don't
blame it.'-Puck.
Briggs-Was the Boston girl pleased
when you proposed? Griggs-Immense-
ly. She said that in twenty minutes
straight talk l didn't make one gram.
NAUTICAL error.-Life.
Millie-Why do you never speak to
Mr.. MARBLES now? He is uncouth, hut
feel sure he is diamond in the rough.
Clara-So do |. That's why I'm cut
ting him.-Boston Globe.
He-Have you heard of this new cure
for nervous prostration? The patient
Is not allowed to talk. Shield just as
soon die from prostration as exaspera-
tion.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
Hiram-Hurry up, Mandy, an git
away from this buildin'. Mandy
What's yer hurry, HI? Hiram (chuck-
ling)-The Teller in the elevator forgot
to collect our fares.-Truth.
George, dear, you remember that
lovely sideboard that was so cheap?
Well, I've discovered n plan to make
room for it." "How, my dear?" by
taking larger fiat. Brooklyn Life.
Mrs. Quiverful-Do you know, dear,
in her sleep? Mr.. Quiverful (savagely)
4 don't know about that, but l know
she often cries in mine.-Pick-Me-Up.
Application.-"I am very much afraid
that our friend Mr.. Fritters lacks ap-
plication," remarked the business man.
Not at ALL" replied the friend. "He
applies to me for loan once a week
regularly. "-Washington Star. {
Excited Lady lat telephone)I want
my husband, please, at once. Voice
from the exchange)-Number, pleaseG
Excited Lady snappishly)-Only the
fourth, you impudent thing.-Boston
Globe.
Scorcher-They say that it has bad
effect on the brain to ride with your
head down between the handle-bars.
Sprocket-Don't you believe word of
1t. The men who ride that way
haven't any brain to be affected.-Bos-
ton Transcript.
A young Englishman, being asked at
dinner whether he would have some
bird s-nest pudding, said to the hostess;
"Ah, yes; birds nest pudding. And
what kind of bird may have made ity'
ooh, 1t was the cook-coo made it, was
the prompt reply.
you are advertising quite early In
the year." said the summer-resort land
lords friend. Eyes; | always fix up
my announcements at this time Of year.
You see, | am thoroughly cOnscien-
tious man, and l wish to be able to
state that there are no mosquitoes.
Washington Star.
Miss Homewood-Cha Brushton
told me that was looking pretty this
morning. Miss Point Breeze-That isn't
what he told me he said to you. "What
did he say?' ''He said he told you that
you We're looking as pretty as ever
Pittsburg Chronicle. So
The JUDGE believe l shall leave It
to you this time. About how many
days do you think l ought to give you!
don't just know. Do you think 1t Is
goin' to be an early spring or late
one ?-Cincinnat Enquirer.
Wayworn Watson-Here Is one OF
these story writers who says in the pa
pers that genius Is nothing but hard
work. Perry Patettic-Nothin' but hard
work? And to think that l used TO
have a great respect for them felers
who could write.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
Il understand that you have been
called to another charge" said the In
terviewer NO" said the minister
who had been struggling along at the
tail end Of the little church debt, by
the blessing of Providence this Is cash
situation that l take. indianapolis
Journal.
1t Would Be Costly-He watched the
pompous man getting measured for
suit of clothes. Its an excellent
thing" he said at last, that a mans
egotism Is not included In the measure
ments, or some people would go broke
paying for one suit. Chicago Evening
Post.
II would go with you to the end OF
the earth, he asserted passlonately'
Not with me you wouldn't" she re-
piled, coldly. why notT' he demand
ed. For two reasons" she answered.