Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1898-02-26
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You will keep out of my sight-Boston
Transcript.
"Do you know don't think much Of
Mawson." "You don't have to. You
can size MawsOn up In two seconds"
Brooklyn Life.
= lseggy-Aw-Miss Guace. youah A.
ways In my mind, dontcher know. Miss
Ornce-GOodness! that Is worse than
living IN a fat.--Up.to.Date.
He-Sbe told me I was the light Of
her heart. She--Then what? He
Well. her old man came down and put
the light out.-Columbus journal.
Her Tather--Havc you heard my
daughter sing. young man! Edwin
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES in spite Of
that-1 should like to have her, sir
Ally Slopcr.
Tommy-A lighthouse Is n sign Of
rocks isn't 1t. paw? Mr.. Flight dc.
Ponds on whether you are referring to
the seashore or the drama.-lndian.
apolls Journal.
Sallle De witt--Do you play whist,
Mr.. Lange? Willie Lange-Me play
whlstf Well, I don't think. Sallic De
witte-Ah. true! I had forgotten that.
Brooklyn Life.
mo. l never take the newspapers
home; I've n family Of grown.up
daughters, you know" Papers too
full Of crime, ehT' "No, too full of
bargain sales."-Truth.
Edith-She sings like a canary. Der.
tha-Oh, no! o canary begins to sing
when people commence to talk; people
commence to talk when she begins to
sing. --Boston Transcript.
Tho Missing Evidence.
Maude doesn't show her age Mt NIL.
does she2 Ella-No; but ycr can see
where she scratched II out Of the fam.
fly Blble.-Chicago News.
Tommy-Paw, what sort Of fighter
II a "cyclone hghtcrY Mr.. Tigg-l
don't know much about fighters. but
suppose It IL one who goes blowing
around Indianapolis journal.
His opinion-"what are you doing,
JimmieY' "Readin' tn dictionary
through" "How do you like itr' "Oh,
some o tn words IL good, but others
hain't much sense In 'em."-Judge.
''Does that baby Of yours taiS yetr'
Ills mother says he does; but II It II
talk, then the kid has invented a new
code Of slang that will make him IA.
Observation-Disclosures North American.
Old Million-Aiy dear Miss Young.
thing, II you'd only marry ine. could
die happy. Miss Youngthing-why.
Mr.. Million, II you were dying. I'd mar.
ny you In mluute.-New York Weekly.
Ethel--IIave you noticed how Lord
Slabsidcs drops his aspirateS2 Pencil.
ope-Oh, but that's nothing to the way
lie drops his v0wcls-papa says no has
got more than q dozen Of his i-o.u.s.-
Judge.
''Why does the baron look 20 glum3
I thought he had Just married an heir.
ess." $50 he has; but he speculated a
few days after the marriage and lost
the better half Of bis wife."-Fliegende
Batter.
Mr.. Romanx-I tell you what, a baby
brightens up the house, and that's .
fact. Mr.. Practickel-Yes; we've had
20 keep the gus burning all night ever
since ours was born.-Philadelphla
Record.
"What In thunder do you mcan." ask.
al the city editor. "by comparing the
air to frozen Quinine" II meant to
say" said the new reporter. with proud
humility, that It was bitter cold
Indianapolis Journal.
D0llie-I wonder why Love II repre-.
aented always with wings? Mollie-
They are for him to use In Tying out OF
the window when Poverty comes In at
the door. Don't you know that much!
Cincinnati Enquirer.
DO you think that glasses tend to
weaken the sightr' asked Col. still.
wells friend. Aud after pensive con.
celebration the colonel replied: 1T de.
ponds. sub. intiahly on how many You
take."-Washington tsar.
us your sister ut home. Willier'
asked Willie's sisters young man.
mo; I heard her say she was engaged
this aftern0on-but don't be frightened;
don't think It's a marrying engage
ment."-Harper's Bazaar.
Unscientitic.-First Arctic Explorer
] have always considered Columbus .
somewhat over-estimated man. Second
Arctic Explorer-Why? First Arctic
ExplOrer--He discovered America the
hrst time he went to look for it.-Puck.
Robinson. the electrician. Is positive
~ the meanest man ever heard Of"
SLOWS thatY' HE persuaded his wife
to wear an electric seal sacQue on tho
ground that It would be an advertise
incnt for his business. Chicago News.
II have received nineteen proposals
In the last two months" "YOu don't
say! What a large number of suitOrs
you must have. Whom were the pro.
pOsals fromT zone from Charlie and
eighteen from that French count
Judge.
II should like to know your inten.
tons, SIR" said the old man to the
youth who had been calling on his
daughter with great regularity for q
long time. "Same here" replied the
young man promptly, I'd like to know
yOurs."-ChicagO Post.
"IIow can you say such cruel things
Of your antagonists In debateY' she In.
quired reproachfully Of the statesman.
oh" was the reply, "that's easy
enough. keep scrapbo0k, and when
s,x, nvyn ts1aus arivn ont I m In that