Willmar tribune., 1898-01-04


mind can persew so menny idees at
wonst. Now thare is old Gladstone
for instans who in the midst of all his
pollytickel labors hez found time to a
lot Of pewrly literary work, thet wood
hev tacksed the entire time of an ordi-
nary individewal. And thare is our
own Henry Feig, who while his CRATE
mind is soreing high up to the ewten-
ant Governors chair, can still find
time to lay plans for the improvement
of his fellowmen. With won CLANS of
his eagle eye, he hez seen that the reel
caws Of the llnanshal trubb]es lies in
poor spelling: for in cors a POOR
speller cant be rich. So lifts his GEN.
tel mewsical vols for the return of the
old fashioned spelling skool.
Now, thare aint no dowt in my mind
but what Hank is rite this time. tho 1
differ with him sum on the point in
wich spelling skool is ewsful. I
ewsed to attend spelling skool purity
reglar when l was a young man, and
thare Waren't anuther man in the
Hoosier Stait more interested in them
then [ was, but still my spelling aint
ecksackly purfeckt akkording to Web
ster. The fackt is that the spelling
was only an eckews for coming togeth-
er, and thare were only a few phools
that pade much attenshun to that part
of it, Thoze of us who hadn't no sort
OF amblshun to shine as champion
spoilers jest spelled by sownd and the
sooner we had to set down the better,
for in cors we sot down by sum purity
gal and begun the reel bizness of the
evening, wich was sparkling. My,
wasn't them good times? Thare aint
no plais in the world that will beet a
spelling skool as handy plais for
sparkling. In church you've got to be
keerful, kaws thare the people are all
wais watching to see what everybody
else is doing. But at a spelling skool
everybody pals attenshun to thare own
bizness, and thoze who aint got emmy
pay attenshun to the few fellers that
are spelling. In. evry commewnity
thare was generally 3 or fellers what
hadn't got no ambishun fur emmy thing
else but to spell down the skool, and
they we're nifty handy kritters to hev
around to attrackt the attenshun of
those who were either too old or too
young or too orfully homely to get a
chans to do emmy sparkling. That is
the CRATE beauty of a spelling skool,
and If [ was young agin woodn't ask
no better fun than to 20 to spelling
| skool and heer Hank spell, purviding
the room was big enuff so hold his
spelling apparatus. In cors he Good
MT risk his reputation by missing a
word on purpose, and as long as he
kept on spelling, thare wouldn't be
emmy risk of ennybody heering what
you sed to your pardner Yes, by awl
meens let us have the spelling skools
back. If they get up one around here,
burned if won't take my old woman
and set down with her in a back sect
and let on that we are back in old In
jianny 40 years ago. It is undoubtly
trew that the champion spoilers gener-
ally spells orful poor when it cons to
writing simple words; but as sed, the
spelling schools were not intended for
anything but sparkling and fun. If
we only had more Of spelling skools
and husking. bees and sich like ocka-
shuns WHARF sparkling is natcherally
expected to be carrid on thare would
be less bawld headed d>old bachlers and
thin!n osed old mades, and even
widdowers mite stand some show of
hitching up agen.. For old times saik,
every spelling skool arownd here will
be patronized by
-. J1MMINY CRICKETTs.