Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-08-24
A LUCKY MAN.

to make your fOrtune-marry It. Best re-
turns for the smallest Investments"
''This is a bad season." returned his
friend.
Last hundred thousand just engaged.
Not much left-yes, Brand is deucedly
lucky
Brand was young artist and poet of re-
fined tastes and agreeable manners, but
no money-eXcept what he earned by his
brush and pen-and that was little enough.
He had the good fortune to meet Miss
Virginia Oldham at social function, who
straightway fell in love with him. Miss
Oldham was heiress to half million
hence he was the envy of his friends when
he distanced all competitors and won her
hand.
The silver thread of intimacy that had
connected our two third-hoOr- rooms
in Thirty-fourth street, lost its continuity
when Brand was led in golden bonds of
wedlOck up Fifth avenue. So for sew
eral months l did not see him.
| heard of him, however, as moving IN
q distinguished circle, surrounded by every
agreeable circumstance that beautiful,
accomplished and devoted half million
could command; in short, he was favor
lite of fortune.
Imagine my surprise one evening, when
after a tap at my door, figure entered
as Brands ghost had he not grasped my
hand with such yigor that l was forced
to believe it flesh and blood.
Johnson said he, "Iye come to you
for Sympathy.'
sympathy for such a lucky dogE' L
cried in aStOnIshment.
''There it is again! You, too-every-
body-everywhere l go dining 1t III my
ears! It's unendurable.
pardon my violence" he said, after a
pause. "You-happy fellow, have never
been lucky. You, doubtless, do not know
that lucky man is synonym Tor ms
cradle wretch.
/ begged him to explain.
Can a man be happy by becoming
nobody?''
| thought it doubtful.
"Can he enjoy life without friends!
[ admitted that he could not.
''Can he be otherwise than wretched
without love?'
| thought of Arabella and said ''no."
''Then l will relate some OF my expert
ence.
'EThe first thing 1 realized after my
<iuck' was that | had lost my identity:
and I have never got any other III It's
stead. If any man can dispute my claim
to champion featherweight in the social
arena ] should like to see him. have
no mission. My muse has deserted me.
No longer inspired by board bills. L can
not paint, [ cannot write. ! would g!adIy
assist in managing my wifes business
affairs. but | am no business man, and
she is. She has even made large sums
by sDeculating in stocks Of what use
am [ then? | am an appendage. house
hold ornament! a pet!
''Driven to desperation by these renee
lions one day. | thought would make
myself useful by keeping my Wlte's ac-
counts. | got possession Of ner books IN
her absence The first page was headed:
Household expenses for October, READ.
Taxes so much: servants 50 much;
'horses. so much, and so on down the u.s.
until near the bottom | came to husband,
5000 I dashed down the book, and
rushed out to purchase arsenic. but was
deferred from doing 50 by reading IN I'M
agination the item, burial of husband,
so much.
.:As 2 matter of course, in losing my
identity | lost all my old friends. Smith
cut me at once: others by constantly re-
miuGing me of my changed condition,
compelled me to cut them. | might have
endured all this had | been solaced by
love but what has matrlmOnlally-fOr-
tunate man to do with love. 1 love Vir-
ginia. it is tue. But somehow her halt
million is an impossible barrier between
US She loves me and manifestS 1t by
the kindest treatment. One morning.
shortly after our marriage, L was seated
in her bOudOir She was regally beautl-
looked into her eyes and experienced an
irrepresSible gusb Of tenderness. L took
her in my arms, telling her of my love,
and calling her ehdearing names.
''She seemed touched by this spontan-
eous expression of affection. and gave me
a heavenly smile and kiss and then
presented me with $500! (Here Brand
grOaned)
''Since then I have been haunted.
have in dreams at night seen Virginia be-
fore men, queenly. brilliant, adorable,
and when | have FASTENED to embrace
her, | have found in my grasp only a
bundle of bank bills! Then a thrOng of
people have surrounded me eXclaiming in
chorus: oh, most lucky man.
by day | have been the victim of a
strange optical illusion. Instead OF my
wife | have seen fantastic figure
with real diamonds instead of eyes,
golden thread for hair. pearls for teeth
and an ample dress composed entirely
'of crisp bank bills, and displaying a
well-fIled purse. 1t is the figure of
I'm society | have heard whispers all
around me. Husband Of the Half-AI
lion-a lucky man.
This is my last appeal for sympa-
thy, Johnson. \ man without sensi-
periences, | cannot survive them"
Here ended Brands recital, and 1
gave him what sympathy l had under
such an ordeal, and he took his leave.
| did not meet him again. 1t was
the season of the great panic. One
day [ saw the red flag of the auction
Ger waving before his door, and heard
that he and his wife had left town.
Poor fellow every one called him
now.
A few months since I received q letter
from him, bearing a California postmark
"Oh, my dear johnson, what a happy
day when the crash came. You remem-
Der | mentioned her speculation in stocks
Well, stocks fell and fell until they
they brought down her half million. 1t
was strange, wild exultation l felt
when the news came, and Virginia in an
agony of tears and despair would have
fallen to the floor had I not caught her
IN my arms-the first support l ever gave
her. Fearing to shock her by my selfish
joy. I laid her tenderly on a sofa and
rushed out to enjoy it myself Hasten
ing to Wall street l jostled my way