The Roanoke times. (Roanoke, Va.) 1897-1977, 1898-02-03
THE QUESTION OF MARRIAGE.

THE QUESTION OF MARRIAGE.
Some fSther of a nun erous flock of eli
glib daughters has written to the New
York Sun asking it's advice about purely
family matters. 1t seems that certain
wooer, after four years of ardent court
ship and engagement to one of his girls.
still finds that his finances are not such
as to permit him to marry at present. but
that he will continue his attentions. and
that when the future develops his re-
sources so that he can support a wife he
will then marry. Now we do not believe
that the tired father should have taken
his troubles to a newspaper for a. solution
of them. but his just grievance opens ND
n theme that is well worthy of attention.
In spite of the opposition to short en-
gagements we believe they are far prefer
rable to Indefinitely prolonged ones. No
man has any right to monopolize the best
years OF a womau's life by hanging
around her, shutting out other possible
suitors. while waiting for his finances to
get into such shape as will permit him
to marry. No girl should tolerate such
attentions, but if she should be so blinded
to their injurious effects, then the par.
ent should step in and put an end to it.
The prolonged acquaintance has no tend
ency to cause them to know each other
better, but rather to produce WEAKNESS
in Que or the other, which will only in
~ n q
attempt to bind woman to him by a
promise of marriage at some remote time.
merely because he has happened to con.
celve an affection for her. is selfishneess
of the highest type. IT he loved her 8 he
should, the very knowledge of his inabil.
ify to marry at anytime in the near future
should be the best of reasons for leavinp
her untrammeled by any promise. A
betrothal is second only in sacredness to
a marriage, and the Jewish custom, and
one now being followed in certain cities
by the fashionable leaders of society, of
publishing engagements is n good one,
and wonl" have tendency to break up
thenevils of long engagements
There used to he an old. fashioned Gus
tom, and it. was by no means confined 10
the humber classes of life. That when
father founds young man dawdling
around forever after IL daughter, 10 make
n business matter of it, and have him
"declare his intentions Such a thing
now among cultured people would he
considered thing too boorish to he en-.
tertained for IN ent, but we are Ger.
tain shat the principle EN- bodied in it is
a correct one.
For man to declare his intention to
marry glIl when able to do so is no en-
gagemeut, since it binds neither But
having done this, let him not m onopoliZe
her society to the exclusion of all other
corners, until she comes to be considered
as out of the list of elieibes ny reason of
his attentions
-Four years engagement and no nearer
fruition than when first entered into!
1t is ridiculous. Four months were bet
ter, and it, may be set down as truism
that each will know the other just as
we'll in that time as after four years of
We are we'll aware THAI such cold
hlooded, business-like treatment of such
. subject is liable to lay one open to criti- |
cism. but we are firmly convinced that in |
many cases some such treatment of the |
subject is legitimate one OF the ten.
Ter beauty of loves young dream, of that
June time Of the soul that comes at some
period into every young life. filling and
looding it With rapt nre and a delirious
10Y, the remembrance of which, even after
one years have passed away, causes the
blood to course with warmer life through
every vein, we are in fullest sympathy.
Not one word would we say to mar the
poetic romance of such "a love; but. for the
nan who under the pretence of a be-
-rothal is selfish enough TO drag n wo.
mans freshest. sweetest years through
IN eternity Of waiting, we have con-
Tempt.
Mr.. f. G. Helbig, IL prominent druy.
tist ot Lynchburg, Va, says: Gone ~
our citizens was cured Of rheumatism of