The age-herald., 1898-06-05
WHAT 1 MIGHT
 HAVE BEEN
Or the Story of One Who Failed to Take Advantage of
 His Opportunities.

"When you ride, the world rides with you, when you walk, you walk alone" said old R. E. Morse, as he viewed with envy passing train, and reluctantly sized up long stretch of telegraph poles along the line of a ballasted road.
 "Two years ago this June,' he continued, T came to this dad-blasted town and em- parked in business with a capital of s2O.- 00O-and today I am busted, disgusted, and can't be trusted.
 Well, I'll tell you how 1t happened: My aunt, an old maid by trade, died and left me legacy of $20,O00 in cold cash, and with this inheritance I was left to shuttle for myself-poor thing!
 Arriving here, entered the dry goods business with s5O,Ooo stock, and my first customer was an advertising solicitor, who bought a spool of thread. and in return wanted $2000 yearly contract for an ad- vertisement in the morning paper. This I absolutely refused, but he came every day for a month, and so persistent was he that I had to threaten to have him locked up if he came again-and ] have never seen him since.
 q didn't believe in advertising oh, no! My goods would advertise themselves. s e? Since my two years experience I consider myself the dad-blastedest idiot that ever let nice legacy decay on my hands.
 Advertise!
 "That word will be on my lips when turn up my toes and sink into world of mysteries.
 'When I first began business. trade was rather good on account of the newness of things, but after a week or two it began to drop off, and finally 1. only became nec- essary to refer to my cash register ab ut once Ronth. So had nothing to do but knock tfss cob-webs from my door and gaze at the passing throng. My9 goods were soon out of season and out of fash ion-mot h-eaten and shop worn, and I be- gan to see the handwriting on the wall. Time had not far advanced, when, was forced to leave the hotel (for reasons bet ter known to myself and seek cheap res taurant, and in the latter days I gave up my seat at the restaurant Cor the same reasons) and daily came in contact with the free lunch counter at a thirdclass lsa- loon. How is that for business man?
 Advertiser soaiT
 ''That word will ring in my ears like the resounding echo of Dewey bugle5efo years to come. Didn't believe in advertis- ing. Oh, no! My goods would advertise themselves. See?
 ''The first of June (not two years ago, but the present month) my creditors swamped down on me like wary carrion over the carcas of swarthy Sranard and I am nova merchant without a job. Hut it is said 'experience Is the best teach- err and am now on my way to the jun gles of Africa, where intend to establish junk-shop, and the first advirtising so- lcitor for morning paper that enters my rendezvous shall invite him to take a:seat. send out and get basket of Mums Ex ra Dry. let him inhale the fumes of pure Havana, present him with separate and distinct hide of every beast of the forest, give him sf0,000 yearly contract and slip a cool hundred in the pocket of his linen duster for an extra write-up
 'well, say must be going. No use waiting for the next train. Oh for a fve- cent piece. that might once more bathe this face of mine with a glass of foaming beer and rub this empty paunch against that free lunch counter before my depart