The herald., 1898-07-24
THE TANNED CARTRIDGE
When Commodore Watson Felt the
Disadvantage of Not Swearing

Disadvantage of Not Swearing
hington.-Commodor Watson, who
| is billeted to do some lively work on the
coast of Spain with his squadron, does
not belong to the list of "cussing officers"
yet as man-o'war skipper he never had
a man of his ships company aft for
swearing. He was singularly indugent
of the hard swearers forward.
| Hard language helps man along &C.
casionally," he has been known to say to
one of his deck officers upon overhearing
| a stream of maledictions from the lips
| of some fiat-foot working at a stubborn
job forward. And it is better for the men
to work off their wrath over fouled an
Choir chains in cuss words than to take it
out of each others hide"
Aboard one of the ships under Watson's
command there was an old bosun's mate
named Fuller, who had the call through
out the whole navy as the champion pro-
fame man of the governments line of
packets. He would simply stand back
and regard the inanimate object of his
wrath--a bent Delaying pin, perhaps, or
slack ridge rope-and then he would
open UP in an ordinary conversational
tone. But the utterances he gave vent
to were sulphurous. 1t always took Full
er a good five minutes to work off what
he considered the necessary number of
remarks on such occasions, and it always
seemed, when he was through, that he
had quite exhausted the whole vocabu-
larry of profanity But this was a mis-
take. The very next time anything went
wrong with bit of Fuller's gear he would
start in on new line that would contain
absolutely not single repetition of any of
his previous performances. 1t was al
ways a source of wonder to Fuller's ship
mates, even the oldtimers, where he
picked up the new ones, all of which were
Of startling originality and force.
These shipmates related only one in
stance In which he found himself at a loss
for words. He was in a landing party
from his ship, marching on the outskirts
| of Chemulpo, Corea. He stubbed his toe
on loose boulder in the road and fell on
his face in the dust. He picked himself
up and looked at the road. He opened
his mouth to say something, but he had
no words. He was dumb with wrath.
Two or three times he attempted to be-
gin, but 1t was no CO. He was stuck for
once. So he pulled out pistol and de-
liberately fired it into the air five times.
He had to express his feelings in some
returned to his ship for firing the weapon
without orders, especially in foreign ter
ritory, but his skipper knew the old time
loose after a day or So.
When Fuller was serving aboard Wat
sons ship he was in good shape, and his
frequent quiet outbursts kept the for
ward part of the ship keyed up with Won
der as to what was coming next. One
morning, at big gun drill, Capt. Watson
himself was experimenting the exercise.
One of the wooden cartridges became
damned in the breech of the six-inch
rifle to which he was devoting most of
his attention. He wouldn't permit any
Of the gunner's mates around him to at
tempt to loosen the cartridge, but essayed
the job himself. He tugged at the jamme6
cartridge and broke his finger nails over
it, and still it wouldn't come out. 1t was
pretty hot morning on deck, and the
perspration began to roll off his face in
streams. But he persisted in trying to
loosen the stuck cartridge. He looked
as if he would like to say heap. We're
he a swearing man. When he had been
working for five minutes over the damned
cartridge, with no success, he looked pref
ty helpless and miserable. He gave one
final tug, but the stuck cartridge re-
manned in the guns breech. The skipper
gathered himself together, mopped his
forehead and looked at the gun.
"Confound it al!' he broke out.
"Wheres Fuller? Send me Fuller, some
body"
Fuller was on hand directly. He wasn't
a gunner's mate, and he had nothing to
do with the guns. But Watson wanted
Fuller to tackle the jamnned cartridge
all the same.
Fuller" said Watson. TRY to get that
dummy out of that gum"
Fuller looked at the stuck cartridge,
and Watson retreated to the starboard
side of the quarterback. Fuller made
two or three claws at the wooden car
fridge, but it wouldn't come out. A gun
ner's mate could have got it out in a
jiffy, but Fuller wasn't in that line of
service. He tugged away, but it was no
go. Watson stood regarding the hori-
zon on the starboard side of the quarter
deck. Fuller spat on his hands and made
one more try. The dummy didn't move
the tenth of an inch. Then Fuller mop
| ped his forehead with his neckerchief,
| clapped his cap on the back of his head,
and opened up. 1t was great work, this
performance of Fuller's, and no mistake.
He eclipsed all of his former efforts. He
stood with his hands on his sides, looking
at the gun breech, and saying things at
it that no Morgan, or Kidd, or Teach, or
other heaven-defying pirate could ever
have equaled. The men stood around,
| just looking at Fuller in open mouthed
| amazement They couldn't make out
where he got them all. They were all
in English, but the combinations were
weird. The peroration was frightful, al
though delivered in the mldest tone i'm
aginable.
| When Fuller finished he mopped his
forehead with his neckerchief again, and
walked over to his commanding officer.
who was looking over the starboard rail,
apparently thinking deeply.
Its stuck proper, SIR" said Fuller. 81
can't get it adrift."
"Wel," said Watson, IT didn't think
you could, Fuller; but I needed you
Thanks. You did very we'll. Go for
ward. New York Sun.
She Couldn't Live on 500 Week
"Glover-Rubsam-OnF Friday, July 8, 1898.
by the Rev. Mr.. Meury, Josephine Louise
| Rubsam to Fred S. Glover"
This announcement tells of the sudden
marriage at Jersey City of a young girl
who couldn't struggle along on 500 week
| a N6 all