Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1898-01-05
they WE'RE sUDs, NoTSoUP.


IND Gne Ee2naA0 investigators OAdn'G G0S
Her Name In the Paper.
There is an ambitious young WON.
an reformer in st. Louis whom
every reader of the papers knows.
Not long ago she heard that the city
government was about to make an
inspection of the workhouse, and
she made up her mind to forestall
the investigation by making one on
behalf of the alphabetical associa-
ton of which she was a member.
She had heard horrible stories to the
effect that the Wandering Willies
in the workhouse we're sadly mis-
treated, starved, bastinadoed and
deprived of many of the things
which are essential to the advance
ment and welfare of mankind.
Armed with a permit from the
secretary of heS society and wear
ing the baNst = a member. she
swooped down upon the workhouse
one morning, and, after gaining ad-
mission to the grounds, stole with
stealthy steps around the basement
of the building in searsA of the
kitchen. She knew she would find
the cook making sausage out of the
days killing at the adjoining dog
pound or serving the dishwater as
soup to the friendless inmates. 1t
was just dinner time. She would
catch the miscreants redhanded and
expose them in the public prints
Her name would appear as one of
the leading reformers of st. Louis,
and maybe Lady Somerset would
send her an autograph photograph
of herself. Oh, rapture!
She stepped into long hall unob-
served and was rewarded by seeing
two men, apparently walters, march
ing toward her. Each carried a
mighty caldron of steaming liquid.
"Soup!" Kissed the reformer Turk
ing in the shadows. ''P1l see
whether they are feeding dishwater
to these poor prisoners and calling
it soup, the villains. And she
waited for the coming walters.
"Stop," she almost shrieked in
her excitement, as the two soup car
riers came opposite her. ''Set down
these caldrons. / am Mrs. Hot Stuff,
second vice president of the Won
ans Society For the Prevention of
Dishwater Soup" and she gave her
name and showed the aluminium
star on her heaving bosom. The
men set down their burdens in awe.
'Get me a SPOON" said Mrs.
Stuff, shifting the steam from the
liquid while one of the carriers dis
appeared into a doorway, to return
in a moment with soup spoon.
''This smells to me like dishwater, "
said the lady, ladling up spoonful
of the stuff. The men stood grimly
by while the dauntless reformer
blew upon the hot liquid a breath
like the south wind on the sanitary
company.
Then she slipped the soup with
a grimace. THAT is not SOUP" she
said solemnly "You know it isnot
fit to drink. =
"No, ma am, it is not soup, said
the first wretch.
''It is dishwater, and you know
it," said the reformer.
"No, ma am. it is not dishwater, "
said the second wretch humbly.
"What is it, then? Speak out. It
may be that it is not your fault, and
I will intercede for you if you tell
me
"You see, madam, this is wash
day. After the washing is done we
get the hot water from the laundry
and USE But she was gone. She
didn't wait to learn that the two
TRUSTEES were going to scrub the
superintendent's back porch with
the hot soup" and the next morn
ing there we're no faring headlines
about workhouse abuses and the
brave woman reformer. -St. Louis
Do,o,1h1io