Evening journal., 1898-03-25
WHAT MADE THEM FLAT.

herself in an unpleasant position sever
al days ago, and only extricated her
self therefrom by main strength and
awkwardness
She and her husband came in town
20 purchase two bicycles and few
other things. Everything progressed
satisfactorily until a few minutes be-
fore it was time to start for home.
Then. in a moment OF restored conf
dence, as the Republican politician
would say, she asked her husband to
hold her pocket-boOk for her until she
adjusted the bundles she had In her
arms.
Like any other man would have done
he slipped the purse in his pocket and
forgot all about It. His wife forgot
1t, too.
Presently a Riverview car came up
the street, and the Wayfarer was on
1t. After 1t had stopped the pretty and
vivacious young wife was heard to
cay to her husband.
Now, dear, you take the wheels out
home, and I'll be there TO meet you"
She entered the car and It was soon
bounding merrily towards Brandywine
village. The conductor began collect
ing the fares. She felt for her purse
and suddenly recollected that she had
given II to her husband and that he
had failed to return II. She was in
most unpleasant predlcament. Sud
denly her face frightened. She saw be-
side her a man whom she recognized.
How do you dO?" she said ad-
dressing him.
II am so glad that you are here for
my husband has kept my purse and
want FIVE cents for car fare"
He smiled, said something about be-
ing pleased to have the opportunity,
pulled out the required amount and
held it ready to give to the conduc-
tor.
How is your mother?" she asked.
VERY well, he replied, smiling more
broadly than before.
Are yOu still living in the coun-
try?" she inquired. appearing, to the
Wayfarer to be determined to keep
up an easy flow of conversation.
He looked surprised
Il never lived in the country" he
answered. II live on Ninth street"
Then IL was the pretty wOman's
turn to look surprised.
Why aren't you Mr. Hayes?" she in
quired 1nlu
in"No; my name is Mr. Brown"
y
the wrong man."
Am II" he answered, laughing.
well. I'm sorry"
Just then the conductor reached
them. Mr.. Brown offered the nickel.
The woman interposed an objection.
Please don't take IL, she said, ad-
dressing the conductor and indicating
Mr.. Brown, for that's not the right
man. I mistook him for someone else" ."
Mr.. Brown insisted that he be per-
mitted to pay the fare.
No" she demonstrated. Il would
rather owe the conductor, please"
The passengers were laughing heart
lily and once more Mr.. Brown essayed
10 pay her fare
f'I insist upon owing the conductor"
she said decisively "at the same time
thanking YOU for your extreme kind
ness. Conductor, / will leave the
money for you at my grocer's. No.
Blank Market street. and / trust that
that arrangement will be satisfactory
to you"
Perfectly, madam" he said.
Mr. Brown slipped his nickel back
an his pocket and doubtless mentally
cursed the luck that made him look
so much like Mr.. Hayes without Civ
instead
OF one on Ninth street.
Both he and the pretty young wife
felt fat and uncomfortable but there
was no attempt on the part of either
70 renew the conversation so enthu-
siastically begun.
THE WAR STORM-CENTRE
This diplomatic crisis, which NAV
terminate in war with Spain, has
Drought TO the surface more statesmen
than II was ever dreamed that America
possessed. Like corks, they are float
ing and bobbing up and down on the
troubled waters, discussing the situa-
tion and its developments and deciding
what course President Mckinley and
Congress should pursue in the matter.
Every home, store, Office, mill ana
manufactory has one or more such
Statesmen. They know Just how the
maine explosion occurred who did II
why II was done and what retaliation
snould be inflicted. Long before the
dlVers began their operations these
statesmen had definitely determined
just What they would find. They were
perfectly familiar with all the nice
points OF international law involved in
the controversy To them the secret
sessions of the Board of Inquiry were
as open as though held in an unfenced
neid, and at this iuncture they know
Just what the report contains. what tn,
board recommends and what Presiden,
Mckinley and Congress will do in IN,
premises. '-''
The clerks in one Of the large Office,
not more than two squares from Mar
ket street bridge have formed them
selves into a regular cabinet They hoI,
daily meetings, outline policies. draw
up an ultimatum every three or fo1r
minutes; follow it with a declaratio,
OF war. and an assignment of ships ia
coast defense. They count upon thei
outing Club to act as a great naval re
serve in such an eventuality as tha
which they desire.
II President Mckinley and CONGRESS
want to know just how this Cuban mai
Ter stands and what will be the out
come of il all they need do is 10 asl
Dan Walter, John, Leonard and IN
rest Of the boys about it.
A STRANGE AFFECTION