Arizona republican., 1898-06-12
ELI'S NOTES FROM NEPTUNE.

The following note received at our of flee by flying fish to avoid the censor. ex- plains itself:
 'sOn board the Merrimac, bottom of Santiago bay. Cubic, June 5. 1898 mew style.)
 sMy Dear Eli. This Is the dedgasted- est joke on the Spanish Kingdom I ever heard of, and I've seen some pretty mean jokes played on 'em from year to year. Jugg1n' from this one, the armada business as a payin' industry, had about as well be give up. It's passed its divi- dend again and the board of directors is Twin too high to suit the stockholders. The fust thing they know sumthin' Il bust and it won't be no gallus button either.
 When pulled up and quit Key West because them clockwork boats was rilin' ! up the water and gittin' it all greasy with machine oil I didn't think there d be anythin' much goin' on about here, but just pushed along to see if schley was to be given a show to earn his pay or was to be kept tied up with one of them darn lightnin' hawsers they're been rigin' all over my dominions lately. knew Cervera was inside the bay, but give him credit to be sharp enough to things up with 6 hurricane, and then sneak out, but Gosh, he couldn't git out now with a flock of balloons.
 'I vas sittin' on a lump of coral f1irtin' W1In aA H6TIud1Q dO0uC . CHUCK III lIC mornin' of Friday when heard the dog gondest thumpin' an puffin', an blowin' an wheezin' that has give me the fidgits sence sailin' ships went out, and lookin' up I see Hobson and lot more lubbers sa1lin' along on cast iron stove full of black rocks, that was just rollin' from side to side and plowin' up the foam and kickin' up Cain with It's flukes and rip- pin through the wated at the terrible rate of about four knots an hour.
 What in the name of whales is this?' says. Has Hobson gone to peddlin' junk, or is he goin' to throw rocks at the Spaniards. or is he tired of life, or what is he?
 "And then I looked at him closer and my. but was shamed.
 "HObson had lost his clothes. So had his gang. There wasn't pair of sus- penders among 'en, and as for pants we'll, I won't say how scarce pants was, but 1t was the most gosh-all-tadpoles few-clothes expedition I ever knew the American navy to be guilty of. and the American navy has scratched along on some pretty diaphanous raiment before this. Hobson had rat and Diegnan had a shirt, but Murphy and Kelly and the rest of 'em looked like they'd jest ing-house and hadn't remembered to take anything along but a six-shooter and a box of cigarettes.
 '1 rubbed the barnacles out of my eye DTOWS tO lOOh dS dlLIt lOI I COulOnt De- lieve the boys were just goin' for swin, but by Jupiter, it seemed like they were A flat mouth shark next to me began to grin, but give him a poke with my old pitchfork and I guess he's goin' yet
 "Just as they got in range of Tomor- row castle the Spanish began to wake LID, and they thought their time had come. They began to shoot and swear in Span ish but that old cook stove didn't mind being hit no more than an empty barrel It kept on it's wobblin' way, scrapin' the sides a bit, but Hobson just smilin' and them Spanish shootin' trunksful of old iron at 'em and mostly goin' wide
 "By and by Hobson gets her right into the narrow part and jerks a line tied to a feller in the bows. The feller cuts the cable and down goes the anchor. Great whales, how them Spanish did shoot, But it wasn't no use. They couldn't stop it. Then the fellers began to jump overheard, HobSon last, and just as he went he touched a lightnin' button that let off the goldarnerest pack of fire crackers I ever saw underneath her and blew the bulkheads out of the old craft. which proceeded to heel over and sink They all got aboard of little two-bar- reled catamaran and pulled over to the admirals flagship. askin' did he have a ieW extra suits of clothes. and would he nave the steward pipe all hands to break Iast, as they were hungry, and he need Tt be in any hurry about leaving Santi-
 The admiral was surprised to zee