Santa Fe new Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1898-1951, 1898-10-18
THE REAL BURGLAR.
DY B.. LEWIS.

From the time l could read the life
and adventures of "Sixteen String jack
up to a few months ago I had Il pro
found admiration for the highwayman.
Next to the highwayman came the bur
glar. l don't know but he was an equal
favorite in my imagination. For years
l left doors unlocked and windows open,
hoping a burglar would call, but fo1
reasons unknown to me my house was
avoided.
A few weeks ago | was left to keel
bachelors hall while the rest of the
family paid a visit in the country. One
night at midnight, as I peacefully slept
in my bed, something happened tt
arouse me. 1t took me a minute or two
to discover what that something was,
but l made no mistake. A man stooG
over me with a cooked revolver held
close to my head, and as he saw that ]
was awake he growled:
CHOW, then, l wants to talk to yer.
If yer go to raisin any row, yer'll git a
bullet plumb through yer head"
"Who are you?" I asked.
eyer kin call me most any name"
"And what do you want here?'
"I'm after the swag."
"Then you must be a burglar"
Eur sure"
So my burglar had come at last. l sat
up in bed to get Il good look at him, and
after one glance l felt sick at heart. The
burglar Of my imagination had always
looked the gentleman. This fellow was
q low proved, common locking man who
hadn't been shaved for a week even if
he had washed his face or combed his
hair during that period. He not only
looked common, but he looked low mind
ed and tricky. l had always given a
burglar credit for wearing good clothes,
but this man had on a cheap suit, and
it was badly worn in spots. I was dis
appointed and disguised, and he saw !
was and asked:
care you sure that you are a bur-
glafa" I queried.
"Of course I am. Haven't I bin ar
rested five or six times and served two
different sentences fur burglary?"
"That may be-, but I had a different
idea Of the fraternity. You are not an
intelligent looking man. You wear very
shabby clothes. You can't speak ten
words without making a slip in your
grammar. Be candid with me. Aren't
you a chap who got i'll here by mistake?
Wasn't it your plan to rob the clothes
line or steal something from the wood
shed?"
"What yer givin me, ole MANI" he
exclaimed as he tapped mt Oh the head
with the muzzle Of his pistol. after
l gifts through with yer yer'll think I'm
q burglar fast huff. Git over ag'in the
wall Now, then, if yer move a finger
I'll bore yerl'
One side Of my bed stood against the
wall, and I moved over at his bidding.
My clothing hung on a chair at the foot
of the bed, and he laid down his pistol
and picked up the garments in success
sion and searched them. From my trou-
sers he took u roll of money amounting
to about $40, from my vest a gold watch,
from the breast pocket Of my coat some
papers Of no value to him, and after a
glance he returned them. On the dresser
was my diamond scarfpin, and when he
had placed that with the other plumber
I said:
II have always believed that men
were driven to burglary through power
ty or misfortune or unjust treatment.
How was it in your case!"
"I went into the bizness because l
wanted sunthin dead easy" he replied,
with a solemn wink Of his left eye.
"And doesn't a burglars conscience
trouble him now and them"
II never heard if it did. II the pur
leece let's us alone, u consoiences are
all right. Where's the rest of the stuff,
ole MANI"
care you asking if l have anything
else Of value you can carry Off"
eur sure! This is no haul. There
huff money in this to pay me fur
walkin half a mile"
ut will figure up close to $500, and
1t seems to me that is pretty fair pay for
IN hours work"
"Shet up. Now, then, git outer bed.
What for?"
Tim goin to tie yer fast while !
ransacks the crib. Where's the wife and
children"
"Out in the country"
That's good. I'll hev the crib all to
meself. Put on yer trousers. Now sit
He placed the chair against the radi-
stor, and as ! sat down he whipped a
sheet off the bed, tore it in strips and
tied me to both chair and radiator. He
nervous and alarmed all the time,
out attempted to hide it by buster. I
told him that he ought to be
ashamed Of such nerve and was reward. !
ID by n cuff on the ear which kept my
head ringing for five minutes. When he
lad secured me to his satisfaction, he
ooked me over and said:
"I'm goin down into the kitchen for
Iunthin to eat, and If yer try any tricks
NJ me it'll be the wuss fur yer"
1T is no use to 60 down." l replied.
There has been nothing to eat in the
louise since the folks went away a week
lgo."
"Then I'll hev to 70 hungry. Let's
'ee what's In this safe deposit" [,
He opened all the drawers in the