The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1898-03-27
How He Began a speech.

! There Is well-known lawyer in this
city, says the Philadelphia Times, who is
especially sought after for after-dinner
| speaking by various clubs and societies.
/ he Is never dull is often eloquent and
Is experienced in humoring an audience.
The two hardest points of a speech are
the beginning and the end. The introd:lc-
ton must put the diners in good humor,
and bit of oratory must leave them APP
plauding at the end. Now, the close of
a speech is generally the suggestion of
the moment, guided by the temper in
which the after-dinner speaker has found
| his listeners. But there is no time TO
sound at the beginning, and the start of
the speech must be prepared beforehand.
The way this lawyer has found to be the
safest to open his toast, and one which to
the knowledge of the writer he has used
invariably, in the speeches made this win
ter is this:
The speaker picks up his menu card and
glances at the toast, throws back his head,
smiles and adjusts his glasses. Then, in
three or four sentences as TO the ma gni-
tude of the subject-he generally speaks
on the President" or "Our Country
he winds up with I'm afraid you've cali
ed the wrong man.
Here there are always one or two who
generally cry: mol" go onr' and, aft
er the interruption subsidies, the speaker,
as If suddenly remembering, says: Il feel
something like the Irishman-you'v all
heard the story''-rnore encourag ing cries
of Go on"-"the Irishman who left the
hotel he was stopping at and went off on
a drunk. While he is out waggish friend
persuades him to have his beard shaved
off, and the same friend, after taking him
to the hotel, leaves call for Pat at 6:15
Accordingly at that hour next morning,
the chambermald knocks on the door I'M
til the man is awake. Up jumps Pat,
when suddenly he sees his changed face
in the glass. All remembrance of the DO
ings of the night befoSe has left him. He
runs to the door, opens it and bawls after
the chambermaid 'Begorrah, you've call
ed the wrong mani "
Here there is continued laughter, and
when it subsidies bit the speaker says,
so I'm afraid you've called the wrong
man to respond"
Not bit of itr' shouts some voice, ana
the speaker goes on: Thanks for the in
terruption, and, speaking of interruptions,
reminds me of another story" Here the
diners enthusiastically applaud the ready
wit of the speaker, who continues: 'There
was once an Irish lawyer, Mr.. Finnerty
by name, who was practicing in Dublin.
During his very impassioned address on
behalf of his client suddenly outside the
window an ass brays. His honor, fond of
joke at the expense of the lawyer (here,
if there is judge among the audience, the
speaker mentions him by name and says
that the judge will bear him out when
he says that this is always the case) and
interrupting at this very moment says,
Pardon me, Mr. F'innerty, but 1 didn't
quite catch the last point you made
daughter interrupts the speech)
But that isn't the end OF the story.
When his honor is charging the jury the
ass brays again and Mr.. Finnerty (here
is added, if the banquet is an Irish one.
praise for the quick Milesian witt, hold
ing his hand to his ear and smarting I'M
der his honors castigation, retorts, If
you plaze, your honor, repate that last
point again. The echos so bad in court
l couldn't quite make out what your honor
said -
The strangest thing is that the lawyer
who uses this introduction has yet to see
it miss fire. Each audience approximates
10 the other and the Interruptions on which
the motive for the jokes is hung never
fail to be made. The formula can safely
be recommended as a safe and sure one
for an after-dinner speaker to use