The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1898-07-17
Lessons for Men,
Lessons for Women
Mrs. Jefferson Davis Analyses the Causes of and Suggests
Remedies for the Extravaganza of Wives.

to give. | think the difficulty lies in wo-
men of moderate means competing Wllh
the wives of millonaires whose proper
and reasonable expenditure IN I'll month
would amount to more than the friend $
yearly income. rather than to any desire
on her part to be wastefully eNtrava-
CANT. Perhaps it is Il weakness, but one
in which we sympathiZe.
A PLEA FOR SIMPLE PLEASURE.
1t is very hard for an elegant, we'll
born woman to realize that her lack OF
money will exile her from fashionable
society. and yet if the women of our day
could appreciate the wholesome sweet
ness of simple pleasures bossoming with
i'll the circle of their own homes. doubt
if there would be so many heartburnings
and overdrawn bank accounts.
/ do not wish to say that Il nervously
constituted American mother ought TO
take complete charge of her children. but
century. and women would be super
human should they escape its pernicious
effects. This desire to- excel has brought
with it no concentrate pleasure. and it
would be absurd if it were not so in
tensely tragical to hear the complaints
of fatigue of the devotees of fashion who
the muckrake. refused the heavenly
crown for earthly stubhle. Human ma
ture is so constituted that people demand
pleasure of some sort almost as impeli-
ously as they crave physical sustenance.
1t is simply question of the choice of
amusements. and it seems TO me that
education and personal endeavOr should
both be directed toward the development
of simple. wholesome tastes which may
he INDUCED without Il profigate eXpendi-
ture of either health or money. Just
herein exists the danger of our modern
life.
We seem unable to do anything within
the measure of that golden mean which
Confucius lauded. If we play game
we play it as though it were the business
Of our lives: if we offer our friends enter
tainment the pleasure of extending hos
pitality is stihed by the ambitious desire
to excel our neighbors.
THE PROFESSIONAL SPIRIT.
The professional spirit, as sporting
and the formation Of their moral charac-
ter for the mere chase after social dis
tinction has, like Bunyan's man with
the mother who denies herself the pleas
IRE of watching the mental development
men call it, is the curse of the nineteenth
are driven before the winds of their en-
gagements until all idea of real friend
ship or pleasure in social intercourse
drifts far to leeward.
What we want is Il return to simpler
or more American standard of living
where contentment and cheerfulness will
find Il place in the home circle growing
up as they do from the gentle courtesies
and mutual forbearance which are the
flowers of family life.
1t is the multiplicity of amusement and
not its costliness which makes the diff
ference between gayety and boredom
indeed, any one who has associated with
fashionable people must have recognized
the feverish delight with which they
plunge into any novel form of entertain
ment, thus demonstrating the inadequacy
of expense as Il means Of pleasure. and
could people only seek to be simpler in
their hospitality, could space for spon-
taneity be left in the programme of the
hostess. it is just possible that the rare
and beautiful lost art of conversation
might spring up again among MS and we
might amuse ourselves Herewith to the
enrichment of our pockets and our minds
as well.
yARINA JEFFERSON DAVIS.