The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1898-08-27
NEVADA.

wv 80 = ~ - -
jorf Gallant afajor-No. I can't: but
you don't look it-Tit-Bits.
Josh-It's wonder none OF them fell
lers ever found the north pole Hiram
--Mebbe IL amt there.
Hoax-rm not going TO cali on a sin
gle girl during Lent. Joax-eoing IN
for the married ones. Philadelphia
Record.
Poor Jimmie, Foive years In sing
Sing. do feel sorry for him. .'Beiad.
an yure shympathy's trowed away.
He's surrounded By frinds. Harlem
Life.
Rastus. Jr.-Poppie, IL we gwine toe
hab turkey 70 nah birfdays Rastus.
Sr.-'Pends on de moon chile. de night
befo'. Ponds on de moon.-Inter
Ocean.
Little Sister-What's the din renee
tween Electricity and lightnin5 Lit
tie Brother-You don't have TO pay
nuthIn' fur lightDln' Detroit Free
Press.
Sponger-Say, old man, can you oblige
me with a cigar? Fred twho knows
him)-Sorry. but I've the only one I'm
smoking, and another which | shall
smoke shortly.
Mistress (seyerelyl-If such a thing
occurs again. Norsh. | shall have to get
another servant. Norah-Oi wish yez
wud; there's aisily enough wurruk for
two ay us.-Puek.
Daughter-But. pa, Mr. Sweetser has
accumulated a competence. Pa-Com-
petenee be blamed. Money is the thing.
You want husband who can support
you.-Transcript.
johnson wants 10 borrow some
money Of me. Do you know anything
about himgr | know him as well as |
do you. | wouldn't let him have
nt."-IndIanapoIis Journal.
Perkins-Has Slopay ever paid you
that ten dollars he borrowed last year:
Dobson-No. | guess he has forgotten
all about II: he Is just as social and
friendly as he ever was.-Puck.
Attorney isternlyJ-The witness VIII
please state II the prisoner was In the
habit of whlstllng when alone. Wit
ness-I don't know. was never with
the prisoner when he was alone.
De Short-You notice. perhaps, that l
have sold my gold watch, and now car
ry silver one. Harduppe-Yes. old
man; It's only another proof OF the old
saw: circumstances alter cases" you
know.-Life.
Brady-Did We hear av the foight be-
tuxt Hinnissey and O'Gawliganf Grady
-Oi did not Was 1t to a finish? Brady
That was Hinnissey's lntintion, but
Hlnnissey was knocked out before he
got that far.-Boston Transcript.
Your son." said the professor, has
been laboring under a misapprehen
sion" Peerless" exclaimed Farmer
Corntossel, with joy In his voice, we
don't mean itI' Mean WHAT That
Joslar has been workin'. "-Washingto
Star.
Paterfamilias Look here. Dick, |
you've been a bit wild yourself In your
day and I'd like some advice. What |
am | TO do with Harry? The young
rascal exceeds his allowance every
month. Cousin Dick-Increase it-Chi- |
cago Journal.
she-How Is 1t you were not at West
ends receptionf Hell stayed away
on account of personal matter. She
May ask what 1t was? He-Will you |
promise to keep 1t seeretl She-Yes. |
He-Well they failed to send me an in
yltation.-Collier's Weekly.
Mrs. Betterhawse-I am told that you |
allow your husband to carry a latch |
key. Mrs. Graymair-Yes, but It does |
not fit the door. l just let him carry |
II TO humor him. He likes to show 1t |
TO his friends and make them think he |
Is ependent.-Clncinnat Enquirer.
Mosher-What are you doing with all |
those bits OF card in your poeket5 Wis
well-They are seat checks at different |
theaters. 1t says on each, Retain this |
check" It's an awful bore, to be OBJ
llged to carry SO much pasteboard |
around. But, then. what's fellow to |
do?
Lady lin employment office - As |
there is only my husband and myself in
the family. think you ought to be will |
Ing to come for less than you ask. |
There are only two persons to cook for. |
Domestic-But. mum. when I'm wild |
you there'll be three.
"Habberjohn doesn't seem TO have a
very loyable nature" well, no. IL
Habberjohn We're at a banquet and
some one should discover that there
We're thirteen at the table all eyes
would instinctlyely turn toward Hab-
berjohn as the one TO go."-lndianapo-
lis Journal.
Clara-Well. aunt. have your photo
graphs come from Mr. Snappesehotte's?
Miss Maydeval Cangrily)-Yes, and they
went back, too, with a note expressing
my opinion OF his impudenee. Clara
Gracious. What was ii? Miss Maybe
yal--Why, on the back Of every picture
were these words: The original OF this
Is carefully preserved"
A clergyman new to living in the
west of England was told that an old
man In his parish was of an exceeding
ly crusty disposition. so be determined
TO make friends with him the first OPP
portunity he had. Overtaklng him IN
he village one day, he said: This Is
old weather, John" Receiving no re-
,ly. he tried again: 81 said this Is cold
yeather, John" Turning angrlly
xa tha old man renlIad. aVail