The Winslow mail., 1898-02-19

>esseESATpf ing groeeryman
the tavern there The only man l saw
at first was a jolly looking, red-faced
little old man, on whom care or sorrow
seemed to have never laid a finger.
"F'ine day. said, getting off my
blackboard.
'Ptic'lar fine an cheerful the little
old man said. 4 hain't see a cheer
fuller day in forty years an better
Then he went down the road whist
ling. vas gazing after him yet when
some one said:
Its leetle queer that Uncle Abel
went away without waitin' to see
whether you want going to buy sum
pin an asst him in; but he's feelin'
overpowerin' glib to-day, an mebbe
thought nothin' could make him feel
any BETTER
This speaker, as l saw when ]
turned to look, was tall and slim and
lanky, and was whiting a stick. He
had come from the barn, and, as ]
found, was the landlord. walked in
Yes, said the lanky man, Uncle
Abel Is feelin' overpowerin glib to-day
You wouldn't take him to be a lone an
lorn widderer, which the pardner of
his bosom was only laid away yiste'-
da.-, now, would you?
Il had to admit that the old gentle
man was trifie clipper and cheerful
for one so recently bereaved.
Yes the landlord went on, Aunt
Huldy's left Uncle Abel at last. 1t
was sort Of an accident like, though. I
don't think she ever would although
O. doin' of it, cause Uncle Abel was
four that Aunt Hubby had handled. an
she had wore black bombazine fer
three on 'em, an it was jest as good as
ever, that black bombazine was, an
there amt no kind o. doubt that she
had stiff idee O. Wearin' it fer Uncle
Abel, an mebbe fer Somebody that had
the courage to be No. 5. You see, Uncle
Abel is the harmlessest man that ever
sot round, an Aunt Huldy's disposition
s sot sumpin' like a cross-cut saw,
an when she got to movin' she was a
ripper. How would some fresh tansy
schunched in glass and moistened
with about three fingers O. Jmaky rum
strike you?
II was willing to risk it, and the
lanky but garrulous landlord scrunch-
ed the tansy and moistened it per
recipe.
eyes, sir he went on, having
scrunched and moistened for himself
also, and taken pay for both. Aunt
Hubby was ripper when she got to
movin', and the trouble was she was
movin' most O. the time. I've knowed
Uncle Abel to rOOSt In an apple tree on
his clearin' all night, waitin' for Aunt
Hubby to quiet down, an I've heerd
him say, mOre'n wunSt, that 1t was a
good thing he'd been kicked in the
head by a mule wunst and got over it,
or he'd be afeared O. the consequences
If Aunt Hubby got to movin'.
"'Aunt Hubby she was tremendous
sot ag'in Uncle Abel goin' fishin', an
Uncle Abel he'd ruther go fishin' than
to the circus. Last week he couldn't
hold out no longer, and he went over
to Ben Runnels' pond to troll for pick
er'l. The fact is, though, that the pond
amt Ben Runnels, cause there ain't
no setch person as Ben Runnels, nor
hain't ben this twenty year an better,
an when there was a Ben Runnels he
didn't own the pond. The last day
there ever was Ben Runnels he went
ftshin' on that pond. If the f1shin'
hadn't ben so uncommon good that day
Ben mowt be with us yit. Ben had
half pint O. fish worms with him in
an old tomattus can, an half a gallon
o worm o the still In jug. This was
for exhilaratin' purposes. Ben alluZ
exhilarated arter ketchin' a fish, but
the fish bit so fast that day that they
KEEP Ben buster than usual exhilar-
atm, so that when folks went to see
what was the reason Ben didn't git
home that day, an found the boat up
sot an Ben an the jug f1oatin' in the
pond, there was less than two little
1iggers of eXhilaration left in the jug,
but there was more than five gallen O.
WdleI III Del. 1t WASH QrOW HULL Iudl
killed Ben, some folks thought. They
said 1t was the sudden washin' of all
th- exhilaration outen him by so much
water gittin' inter him that done 1T,
Ben not bein' used to setch overpower-
in Disappointment. An that's the way
Ben got the title to that pond, an it's
ben called Ben Runnels' pond ever
sence.
"'Well, there's where Uncle Abel
went fishin', spite O. Aunt Hubby s
warnin s. an when he got back don
s'pose that Aunt Hubby ever moved so
rippin' in her life. All that Uncle Abel
has ever said about 1t is that she jest
swatted him over, an then sot on him
till she peeled what Uncle Abel says
=. -ust ben more'n a bushel O. taters.
Aunt Ruldy weighed in the vicinity O.
200 pound, an every time Uncle Abel
wiggled she'd scrunch down on him.
An speakin' O. scrunchin', there's lot
more tanZy; shell l.
Il interrupted the landlord to say
that l didn't care for any more, and he
seemed so much disapDointed and re-