The record-union., 1898-10-04
SCHEME WENT ASTRAY.
An Easy Way to Get Your Ten-Acre
Lott Dug Up.

A curious sight met my gaze as ]
| turned into the road that leads to CO.
vina- In a zen acre lot there were
about 100 men and women of ali ages
and sizes, working with feverish haste
tearing up and uprooting the ground.
The only party who did not appear to
be excited was an old man seated on a
bowlder in the shade of a pepper tree,
calmly smoking a corncob pipe.
"Howdy, stranger?" he exclaimed, as
he removed his pipe, yer rather late,
but hit amt been found yet; so if yer
wanter start in ye kin
What hasn't been found ?"
Them yaller boys, stranger. Thar's
$1OO,O00 out thar in thet year field"
How did it git there?'
hit wuZ planted thar by the old
Spanish fathers over 200 years ago, an
hits all in tWenty-dollar gold boys. an
hit goes ter the man who finds hit
Nonsense! Don't you know that
there wasn't such a thing as a twenty
dollar gold piece in those days?"
The old man grinned at me and-then
said:
I see thet yer on, stranger; but don't
give hit away. Yer see, thet ten acres
belongs ter me, an 1 wanter put spuds
in hit, SO 1 jes' started thet yer yarn
ter git the field dug up. I reckon thet
hit will all be dug by sundown"
l smiled and rode on
In the evening 1 passed the same spot
again. The excitement seemed to have
increased and centered on one spot in
the middle of the field. A huge bonfire
lighted up the scene and the dirt was
flying in all directions.
As 1 was watching the novel scene |
was hailed by the old man from a spot
near by. / walked over to him and dis
covered that he was tied to n .ree
For Gawd's sake, unite me, stran-
ger!" he cried
What is the matter?' I asked.
Natter" whined the old man. THE
matter is thet I'm an old fule. After
ye left this morning 1 got to worryiri'
fer fear they wouldn't git the place dug
up before sundown, SO 1 went over an
added another hundred thousan ter
sorter cheer them up.
"Wul, darn my hide! while I wuz a.
hoppin' around thar a-wavin' my arms
an shoutin' to them ter work faster
lost $50 gold piece. an one of them
fules found hit, an hit set the whole
lot plumb crazy, an l wuz the craziest
of 'em all a-tryin' ter make them be-
lieve thet thet yaller boy wuz mine.
"Furst I tried argument, but they
wouldn't listen; then l tried swearin',
but they wouldn't listen ter thet; then
tried foutin', but they hadn't time ter
fout; so they tied me ter this tree.
Stranger, they've got a hole over yon-
der thet's fifty feet deep, an goin'
deeper every minute, an only Gawd
knows when they are goin' ter stop.
They've ruined the field and they We
ruined me, cause thet yaller boy wuz
all l had. But, stranger, / amt told
We the worst yet. I thought thet my
ole woman needed a little exercise, so
didn't let her in on the scheme, an
she's over yander ez crazy ez the rest,
a-clutchin' an clawin' at the dirt like
wild hyena. An when night came she
went and sot fire ter the house, so thet
they could hev light ter work by!
Stranger. I'm a ruined man, an if
the old woman gifts on to the scheme I'll
be dead one, For Gawd's sake. unite
me, so thet I kin leave the country"
/ united him, and he started down
the road on a clean jump, and for aught
l know he is running yet.-St. Louis
Post Dispatch