The White Pine news. [volume] (Treasure City, Nev.) 1868-1906, 1898-09-03
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lpAftH dAN 'HtA
ly in love with each other
Wife Observation-Disclosures much
do you think we took in at the la
zaar? Husband (quietly)-How many,
you mean.-Boston Traveller.
MIR. Hnnker-I have merely speak
Ing acquaintance with Miss Throck-
morton. Mr.. Spatts-You are yerg
lucky; all her other aequalntances are
listening aequaintances.-Judge
Druggist-See here. Why didn't yoa
tell that customer that We had some
thing just as good? New clerk Because
he was after some postage stamps
Puck.
"Old Grabber ought to be satisfied
with the money he has He is
satlsfed-so much so that he wants II
lot more OF exactly the same kind -
Tit-Blts.
Sarah fyawning)-W- what's trumps?
Alice (indlgnantly)-Nhat stupidity.
Why, trumps was the card turned up
at the end of the deal-whateyer that
waS.-Judge.
Before man is thirty he falls in
love with every pretty girl he looks at. :
"YesY' "And after he Is thirty he falls
In love with every pretty girl who looks
At him" Chicago Record.
"You have looked upon my face for
the last time" he resolutely declared.
as he put on his hat. what are you
going TO do" she cried; raise whls
kersT-Chicago Daily News.
Lady-Now that you have partaken
of good dinner, are you equal 10 the
task of saving some woodf Tramp
Madam, equal is not the proper word;
I'm superior 10 it.-Chicago News.
Washington belle 10 young naval of
ficer-I suppose the hardships Of your
life at times. lieutenant Sinecure. are
simply frightful. "Ya'as. very. The
cost of gold braid alone is something
feahful."
II saw a fine specimen of Whistler's
art yesterday" said the girl who likes
pictures. Excuse me" said Mrs.
Cumrox, gently; but You mean you
heard it. don't you, dearg' Washing
ton Star
Now that your son Is n partner In
stead Of clerk. Mr.. Hardly, does he
help you in your business as much as
formerlyY" "A good deal more. That's
fine" Yes; he never shows up at the
office now"
Uncle Ia lawyer)-Well. my boy. I'm
sorry to hear that you are studying law.
l can't see any way that young law
yer can make money now. Nephew
Where there's will there's way
Truth.
Benedick scanning the butchers bib
What's this? \ shilling a pound for
shoulder of mutton: 1t seems to me
that's rather high. Mrs. B.-Yes. dear;
but you know that high shoulders are
fashionable just now.-Tit-Blts.
I'm proud of you" said the head OF
the firm. Il have letters from all over
Kansas saying that they have seen our
samples. How In the world did you
manage it?' and he patted the travel I
Ing man on the back. Cyclone"
''Ah," said gentleman who was
monopolizlng the conversation. ''it Is
easy enough to be good on $1,000 a /
year; but some of us have to De good /
for nothing, and"-looking round in
self-satsfed way" some Of us are"
Mlstress--Get dinner to-day on the
gasoline stove, Bridget. Bridget-Plaze,
mum, did thry but tn stove whit out. |
Mistress-Try again, then. Bridget
Yis. mum, but it's not come back yit. 1t |
whit out trough tn roof.-New York |
Weekly.
''Thackeray a master of Style" re. |
peated Chollie to the earnest person. /
MY deah fellaw, you pawsiiyely don't /
know what you are saying. I've seen
dozens of plctchaws of the old Johnny.
and not one of them showed a coat that
had the least approach to ft."-Cn- |
cinnati Enquirer.
Author-How do you like my new
play? Crtic-Its simply great. The
robbery In the third act is the most
realistic piece OF work ever saw on
the stage. Author (pleasedD-Do you
really think so? s.Critlc-Of course I
do. Why even the words spoken by
the thieves are stolen.
A Words Variations me see,"
said the man who had picked up an old
volume; don means to put things
on doesn't itY 1T depends upon cir
cumstances," replied the friend, who
was reading newspaper. AT pres
ent the Don's sole purpose seems to be
to put things of. "-Washington Star.
Mr.. Wellwood-How did you like
Nine. Medley? Miss Highrocks- She
was wretched. Mr.. Wildwood as
tonished to hear you say that. thought
she was In fine voice. Miss Highrocks-
oh. her voice may have been all right,
but I'm sure fhe gown she wore never
could have been made In Paris.-Cleye.
land Leader.
"The mask Is torn off thy face" she
cried. with all the yehemence of the
woman scorned, "and the cloven hoof
Is revealed The unworthy lover cow
cred back. THAT" he muttered, for he
was not unconscious OF his DEFICIENCIES,
doubtless arises from the fact that |
cannot open my mouth without putting
NV foot in it."-Detrolt Journal.
Dear mev' exclaimed the girl with
pensive, brown. eyes and ink on her
fingers, Il wish had entered school
n year sooner" what Is the matter.
dearY" Things are In such an unset
tied state that | scarcely know what
adrice To give the country In my gradu.