Audubon County journal. (Exira, Iowa) 1884-1993, 1898-03-24
UNHURT BYA 40 FOOTBALL
Drummer Alighted on stones-Would Have
Been Killed Had He Been Sober

1
Been Killed Had He Been Sober.
"Talk about the luck of drunken
menu said the man from Bingham
ton. Give seen enough of it to be-
lieve that it's impossible for one to
hurt himself under any circum-
stances. We had an instance of this
a few weeks ago up in our town, and
you can bet your life that the only
reason the man wasn't killed was
because he was drunk.
when coming into Binghamton
from the west on the Lackawanna
road, you have to cross a bridge
over the Chenango river. The river
runs right through the center of the
town, and the bridgeis about 40 feet
above it. It's shallow enough, but
when the waters low little islands
of small stones dot it for miles.
Right under the railroad bridge
there's one of these islands, about
| 100 feet across. It's never entirely
covered except in the early spring,
when the water is very high.
"Well, on the night of this occur
renee I'm speaking about train
was held up by signal dead in the
center of the bridge, 1t seems there
was drummer in one of the Sleep
ers who was bound for our town.
He had gone to bed paralyzed drunk,
but had left word to be called IS
minutes before the train arrived.
The fool porter forgot to call him
until the train was just going on the
bridge. Then he rushed in and
shouted: 'Binghamton Hustle up
there! Forgot to call you before.
Then he darted away.
Walked out of deep sleep, the
drummer chucked his clothes on in
about 80 seconds and started down
the car, bag in hand, and still more
asleep than awake. Just as he got
to the door the train came to full
stop. He didn't though. He flung
open the door and stepped out into
the black, black night.
''What that fellows feelings were
you can imagine. He must have
thought it was a new kind of jag he
had. Down, down, down, he went,
and landed, kerplunk, right in the
middle of the island.
"He WASH t missed until the train
pulled into the station. Then the
open door told the whole story, and
the porter, pale and trembling, stag
gered into the station to report the
matter to the agent. Thelatter was
a bright, hustling fellow, and he
Immediately rounded up two bag
gage handlers and the lunch counter
man. With the porter and the train
conductor they ran down to the riv-
er bank, clambered down to the wa
ter, cut the painter of rowboat
that was tied to tree and put out.
"They shouted at the top Of their
lungs, but got no response. They
looked in every direction for a float
ing body, but didn't see one. Final
ly the porter made out figure on
the island OF stones.
Fo de Lord!' he exclaimed,
'dere he is dere.
"The station agent ordered the
baggage men to pull for the island
When they got within a few yards
they saw the drummer sitting on a
rock near the water. The agent in
great excitement cried OUT
My God, sir, are you alive OF
deads'
"For moment there was no re-
spouse. Then a faint, uncertain
voice, said:
Shay, if this Binghamton, l
mush shay have the longest steps
I ever see.
It's fact that beyond a few
bruises and good shaking up that
fellow hadn't been hurt at all. We
took him up to the hotel, filled him
with whisky, rubbed him down with
liniments and then put HIM to bed
The next day he was around selling
his goods as though nothing had
happened.
eff he'd been sober that night, it S
a 10 to shot that he'd been killed
by that fall. How he escaped with
out a broken limb OF fracture of
any kind is one of the mysteries
that there's no solving. l just at
tribute it to the luck of the drunken
man. New York Sun.
Ranters.