Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1898-06-01
dtausiae Gatheritlgs.
~ Friends and umbrellas are sell
dom at hand when needed.


United States was Incorporated al
Philadelphia, December 81, 1881.
pg 1t is an old proverb that "boys
will be boys" What pity it isn't
equally true that men will be men.
p9 That young man who drinks
bets, swears, gambles, and idles away
his time, is on a thin place on the ice
tag Japan has a population of 45,'
100000, with a territory but three
times greater than that of Pennsylva'
MIA.
s@- Unsocial old Snarl says that love
is q combination of diseases-an affec'
ton of the heart, and an Inflammation
of the brain.
p@ The Goddess of Liberty can new
er be considered up-to.date until she
mounts a bicycle with quid OF gum
in her mouth.
p6 California crops have been dam
aged by hot winds, and southern crops
by cold ones. 1t seems to be an i'll
wind either way.
e6 Gold keeps coming to this coun-
try from abroad, and the treasury gold
reserve is now at the unprecedented
figure of $1SO,000,O00.
sd A resident of Tuscaloosa county
Ala, is the father of II children, six
being school teachers, and the other
five attending school.
pS "How emphatic Whooply is in
everything he says" didn't you
ever notice that an empty wagon
makes the most noise?"
p@ "Do you really love me, Uriah p
"Course does. Think I been walkin
six miles week ter see you fur the
las year cause I hated you?"
s@ Be careful of your promises, and
just in your performances, and remem'
ber it is better to do and not promise
than to promise and not perform.
pS 1t is easy enough to refrain from
buying what you do not want; but
there are people who economic in this
way and who are awfully proud of it
p9- The United States has fifty dis
tinct secret orders with 5,500,00C
members. This does not include Ia
Dor, military or college secret fraterni'
ties.
p~ We always admire the answer o.
the man who, when asked how old he
was, answered, "Just 40 years; but il
you count by the fun I've seen, 1 am
at least go"
p9 There are people who profess tc
care only for the good things beyond
the grave, but who take pains to Sc
cure all the good things possible on
this side of it.
sar There are banks in all great ci.
ties of the country that could cash q
check for S1,OOO,000 with no greater
delay than would be required to count
the notes or gold.
p6r Sometimes, when a woman re.
fuses to 90 out of town on visit be,
cause she is afraid her husband will be
lonesome, her real reason is that she is
afraid he won't be.
H4 How small portion of our lives
is that we truly enjoy! In youth We
are looking forward for things that are
to come; in old age we look back
ward to things that are past.
p9 Among the new diseases are lis.
ted typewriter's backache, telephone
earache, gumchewers' lockjaw, and
cigarette smokers insanity. A crino.
line craze is threatened also
.@ "Say," said the city youth to the
modest countryman, "hay-seed out o
your hair yet?" "Wal," was the de,
reply, ~ jedge not, from the
way the calves run after me-"
s9r The flying frog of Borneo has
long toes which are webbed to the tips
Its feet thus act as little parachutes
and enable the frog to leap from lofty
trees and descend gradually.
B9r At spiritual meeting, a short
time since, Balaam was called up and
asked if there was any jackasses in
his sphere. "No," replied he, incig'
nantly "they are all on EARTH"
B9 A country newspaper thus de.
scribes the effects of d hurricane "It
mountains, tore up oaks by
the roots, dismantled churches, laid
villages waste, and-overturned hay
stack !"
p0r Statistics show that in 1000
marriages, 392 men marry women
younger than themselves, $40 marry
women of their own age or near it,
and SO marry women older than them.
selves.
pS An Irish gentleman lately said
to another, ~ called to see your fami.
ly, but they were not at home; and ]
suppose they had gone to ride in a
carriage which was standing at the
door,"
s6 John and Matilda sat for hours
in sweet content with the gas turned
off, and yet the time was when either
of them would have been frightened
to death to sit in the dark. Children
are silly creatures
~ "Don't you think have good
face for the 'stage?" asked a young
lady with histrionic aspirations. 81
don't know about the STAGE" replied
her gallant companion, "but you have
a lovely face for bus"
s6 A little 4-year-old girl was ca
pering around her mothers knee the
other day when the mother remarked,
"Why, dear, you are certainly beside
yourself" The little girl replied,
lINEb1 mo T fot 7 woo hocido ION ~