The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1898-01-23

all know her. We have all been her VIC
Tins, for she has all times, and seasons,
and neighborhoods for her own. and
though you journey to the uttermost
parts of the earth you shall not escape her
opportunities She is one of the pests Of
society, and the wonder is that in a world
too full of laws we have not yet found
any way to abate her as an unmitigated
nuisance.
Apparently she never provides herself
with any of the necessities of life how.
ever much she may flaunt the luXuries
before your face. Indeed, the time comes
when you are forced to the conclusion
that her borrowing habit is nothing more
or less than kind of blackmail she
levies on the neighborhood in order to
spend her money on show, and not on
plain, everyday living. At any rate, a
familiar and monotonous figure in your
kitchen soon comes to be her servant
or child with the request Mrs. B. says
will you please lend a cup of sugar, or
a lite coffee. or some baking powder,
or a teaspoon of vanilla" OF course you
lend 1t to her Sometimes she pays II
back, generally in an inferior article,
oftenest you never hear of it again. Now,
the question of generosity doesn't enter
into the matter at all. You might, and
would be delighted TO give il outright to
her if she needed it, but it is troublesome
TO have TO go and get things out. and
equally troublesome to put them away
again if they are returned, and with fatal
persistency the borrower always sends
just at the most inconvenient time, when
you want least to be interrupted.
Naturally, the borrower always has her
nerve, as the slang goes, along with her.
She doesn't hesitate to send over and
borrow your new waist to see how the
trimming is put on, or your patterns be-
fore you have used them, or your papers
and magazines before you get a chance
to look over them These are so nanv
economies she permits herself at your
expense. Then, if you happen to have the
misfortune TO be staying in the same
house with her, she borrows your stamps.
and your fine stationery and you soon
come to know that if your perfume. or
any little belonging is missing, YOU can
hunt 1t UP and locate 1t in her rooms
"Hou are so good-natured l knew YOU
wouldn't care" she says sweetly, "sni |
Just happened to be out" as if she wasn't
eternally out of everything she ought TO
have
Worst of all the borrowing fiends is the
one who borrows your clothes On the
snghtest acquaintance she will presume
10 borrow your new cape, or your picture
nat and friendship with her is simply
wardrobe
Inc Laggard in Love-From Puck
Il give you a key to my heart" said she.
so come when you will and unlock il:
Your key is just this" land she offered a
kiss;
Don't let it wear holes in your pocket!'
Two days fitted by ere 1 ventured TO trv
MY luck in that storehouse Of blisses;
tried the new key she had given to me
But, 10! she rejected all kisses.
You're really so slow" she yawned,
don't you know
Or were you away on vacation?
knew your keyd rust, and-you don't
mind, | trust
I've altered the combination!"
II really seems, says the New Orleans
Times-Democrat. that In climbing 10 a
mounting
sand hill that has peculiarly loose dis
position TO slide under her feet. A case
nave heard of betokens this. A Mrs. R
had pet $50 dog and another brute her
husband. Had this second been sunstrucl,
or otherwise assisted to die she could
have borne up bravely under the bereave-
ment, replaced the red ribbons on The
dogs neck and tail with decorous rem
nants of her own Grape and p,acidlv
hoped that the deceased was having as
calm time in the next world as she was
in this
But cruel Fate decreed otherwise, which,
the fact that the dog was the idol of her
heart, serves to explain: 1t was her lii.
lie god spelt backward, her constant com
panion, which had been shorn IN part SC
as 70 resemble some other animal as vel
unfamiliar TO natural history; and had a
coVerlet and an appropriate tid-bits, a sill,
covertet and an appropriate bark to which
its tail beat time. He escorted her yher
out OF doors, and was as much attached
10 her by a silver chain as to feel himself
10 be her very caYalier-and liked nothine
better save the toothsome caramel
But some misunderstanding arose be.
tween this pet and the husband-theN
omitted 10 speak save in a growl. ana III,
latter, failing 90 recall that Love me
love my dog" was a vital clause in the
marriage vow TO which he had declared
Il will" permitted his petuent foot L
cOiilde one morning with the darling
which thercupon sped TO its mistress yelp.
ing its grievance. The resentment of tn,
wroih wife was shown for several dav.
in tranquil Inconsistencies that the az
gressor existed and when dumbness shut.
down the safety-valve Of her speech n wo
man Is In something like a dynamite stage
of feeling, as you know by experience
Irritated by her large storage of reserve
and persuaded that ii was all due TO The
dog, he lay in wait for Il, feloniously
seized IL, bore il from the house and gave
&c away to some unknown persons. but
with probable instructions to give il }
nice bath and brick
Do you know that that woman has
sought the Court Of Common Pleas and
the inhuman judge decided that the h,,s.
band was at entire liberty to bestow a
kick upon the dog whenever he pleased
nay, that the town officers would mound
Al, too. IL found astray, and that she had
no remedy whatever; and this. mark YOU.
after all the bland assurance of man that
woman Is his equal and that her tender
susceptibllties and other property should
be put beyond his control
And now that woman thinks Of her lost
one. unkempt and stimulating its de-