Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1898-06-12
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SidhuHldS, sisters, SWeetneartS, COUSINS,
| old maids, and even widows, and wish
/ ed II was they who We're about to
/ clean out and leave us instead of the
/ boys. To tell the truth. 1t made US
| fellows who stayed at home feel that we
weren't anything, and that we might
! die and be buried without even so much
as getting a decent funeral or a piece
| Of poetry along with our obituary
notices. Let's reconsider this thing.
ladies', and see if we stay-at-homes
can't capture few tears. You don't
know what good times those soldier
fellows are going TO have without you,
I and the only reason we didn't go with
them is because we thought so much
! Of you. Weep for me tonight at II 80.
when 1 administer the latest remedies
for teethng, or grease the crOupy craw
Of my third-boTn. Peace Of this be
peace hath its victories no less than
war
The average woman, be she rich or poor,
would resort to almost any trick TO save
n cent. Somehow this insignificant sum OF
money seems to have a deadly fascination
for them. Indeed, believe they would
spend a dollar just to gain that one
penny. Witness their mad rush to the
dry-goods stores when two-dollar ar
ticlcs are cut down 20 one dollar and
ninety-nine cents. IL the same stuff were
reduced TO one dollar and "A half they
wouldn't wish it, for the figures thus ar
ranged lose their fascination And then,
too, women reason that any ola chump
could save fifty cents. but IL is only the
most thrifty and economical who look
after the single pennies. At present. the
prime hobby of these parsimonious rem
nant-hunters is the three-cent hOrse-car
line. The antique cars on this route al
most jolt the Filings out of ones teeth
and the ancient vehicles have all the
requisites to make life miserable, but
every woman in town rides in them.
And why?-simply because by walking a
few squares to find the Out-of-the-Way
places where these cars pass, they can
save one cent. Many a time they go down
rown Just for the purpose, rs they think
Of cheating the company out Of that
penny.
Philosophers have sought to fathom this
picayl,ne tendency on the part Of Ewes
erratic daughters, but all explanations
have been more or less unsatisfactory.
Nv explanation is based on the idea of
Woman's bulldosiVe tendencies towards
her husband. They are never happy IN
less they can pick att their consorts,
and masculine extravaganza is one OF
their favorite themes. Ii does their souls
good to mention the fact that they ride
on the three-cent car-line, and to re-
proach their husbands for their prodi-
gality in not doing likewise. That's the
way with you men," they triumphantly
say; you preach economy and cutting
down expenses from morning I'LL night
but YOU wouldn't turn on your heels to
save a cent" And the busy man. whose
time is worth at least half "a dollar an
hour, feels that 1t is vain for him to
explain that il would not pay him TO
lcse twenty minutes trying TO save |
penny. Verify. the "penny-wise and |
doctrine was exclusively |
invented for women.
Every mother in the country viii have |
some excuse for her boy who falls 10 |
pass the public-school EXAMINATIONS.
JIard-headed brats who have made their /
teachers lives miserable will suddenly |
he described as invalids and weddings.
We will learn for the first time that |
these puerile imps suffer from nervous
ness but in our hearts we Will know |
mat a barrel-stave could have remedied
the whole trouble
Richmond lawyers would like very much
~ see a subterranean passage cut from
Main street TO the basement OF the CITY
JTau The Capitol Square with It's green
Grass and gray squirrels and striped con-
victs Is very pretty, but II Is death on
the starched shirts of those who traverse
h eight or ten times a day. The lovers
~ veal-gkin literature are very properly
sesionated az the legal profession these
nard times for IL is shoe-leather and not
brains which brings them their present
revenues.
WHY is II that as soon as green-peas,
tonotoes and strawberries fall 20
.erfs a quart we lose our appetites for
Nom hut when their prices are way
m in q we consider them the best
.bings on earth? This Is question the
,veraea housekeeper would like to have
and so would some OF her
)oarders.
We were sorry last week that we took
49, ,y,fe's advice and did not discard
-. winter fannels. But had we gone
,ontrary 10 her suggestions and been
.auaht In a cold snap, there wouiu
,evsr have been an end to the Il told
,on sos" We stood chances OF getting
roast either way, and may De- aIVer
m. we took the wisest course.
Thank goodness. we have arrived al
hat uninteresting stage OF maturity
yhen we are not expected to send
,ounpet 10 every girl who mails US an
notation TO her school commencement
)ld axe has some advantages, after All.
Now is the time when the head OF the
amily selashly captures the liver OF the !