Pleasantville weekly press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1890-1911, 1898-07-27
A LETTER FROM THE
CITY BY THE SEA.
Argus writes "sarkasti-
cally" Of our Happy
Municipal Family.
INCIDENTALLY COMPARES II WITH BlRIUAs.
HOW THE TAXPAYERS DELIGHT TO BE
"sALTED" AND HOW ECONOMY HAS NO
PLACE IN THIS LATITUDE.

The City is pretty well filed with peo-
pie who are here to spend more or less
money and our native citizens wear a
contented look which seems to say 81
told you So" / say "native citizens"
but perhaps | ought not to for cOmpara-
lively few of the present yearly residents
of this City first saw daylight here. The
most of them have the honor or misfOr-
tune-whichever way you look at it-Of
having been born in some other section
of this Country-or in some other COun-
try. But those different places and
different countries that had the honor
Of our positively first appearance on
any stage were not large enough to hold
us so we all drifted here, by hundreds
and by thousands until now we are
quite cosmopolitan City of distinguish
ed citizens who make considerable of a
noise in the world, wear English broad
cloth, and own electric light and water
stock and other things that make men
great. How well we have succeeded is
known to all the world, and hither flock
men from all parts of the world to imi-
tate our example and learn how to be-
come both good and great. They note
that we are seemingly happy family
and will tolerate more monkey bust
ness" in municipal affairs without "kick-
ing" than any people on earth. Barnum
it will be remembered by our elder circus
goers, had Happy Family" of cats,
rats, mice and other animals whose
natural tendency was to devour each
other. By some process of training he
overcame those natural tendencies and
the interested spectators could look into
a cage and see big tabby cat, with a
peaceful smile on her bewhiskered face,
while good-sized mouse ran all over
her unmolested. In another corner a
terrier would play with rat as if none of
his race had ever dreamed of chewing up
q rodent. | never could quite under
stand how the trainer of those animals
overcame their natural antagonism to
each other, but one of the employees of
the circus threw out hint. He keeps
them chock full of everything they like"
said he. Perhaps it may be SO here.
Our own "Happy Family" of rodent
contractors and terrier politicians feel at
times that they want to chew each other
up, but some skillful trainer takes them
in hand and by iudlciously filling them
up with something they like they lie
down side by side and sleep and play
with each other as if they never harbor-
ed thought of tearing each other to
pieces. This process Ofjudicious feeding,
or hypnotic tanning, or whatever it may
be, has been extended until our larger
Happy Families of easy-going citizens
are expected to keep quiet while all the
big and little rats nibble away at every
thing they want and run all over our
municipal tabby unmolested. These
sly old rats have right to suppose that
the old Cat will never arouse herself and
destroy them because she has SO long
been content to let them run all over
her without making any fuss about it.
Although Barnum's Happy Family was
to all appearances asupremely contented
and happy organization, | have heard
there came time when the older and
stronger animals reasserted their suprem-
acy with their old time vigor, and the
smaller ones suddenly disappeared from
view. The cat enclosed the mouse, the
terrier shook the stuffing out OF the
rat, and sundry educated bugs went to
nouIish the gizzard of big Shanghai
rooster. So | sometimes think the
time may come in the dim distant
future when our City's sleeping big cat
may wake up in terrible wrath and
slay everything around her. At present
everybody knows that we pay more for
every thing we get than almost any
other small city, and one has q right to
suppose that il is entirely satisfactory.
Why Just look at the price we have been
paying for water and light, and horses
and hose Don't the taxpayers delight
to be "salted 2" OF course they do.
They are just aching, in these glorious
easy times, for the opportunity to pay
big bills, and institute high rates of
taxation So what is the use of The
Press defending the right of the taxpay-
ers and why should Councilman Kelley,
or any other man, start in to lessen the
burden of taxation Don't the people
who work hard for living dearly love
to pay big taxes Most assuredly they
do SO why should Mr.. Kelley and his
colleagues in Council or on the Sanitary
Committee 60 smelling around the coun-
try, from city to city, to find out which
is the best system of destroying garbage
and which is the cheapest and best for
the City to use
Economy has no place in this latitude.
Didn't we proclaim that fact loudly
enough when we ordered the purchase of
the Schaufier property for City Hall
park Have we not done so in hund-
red other ways What business then,
1 again ask, has Mr.. Kelley and his few
reform friends to get garbage burner
that will burn They know well
enough that the present one won't, and
that of course ought to be a sufficient
reason why we should keep it. Besides
they know that some enterprising gen.
tlemen bought many dollars worth of
iron which is still ON their hands and
likely to remain there so tar as Mr..
Kelley and the reformers care. Still the
enterprising gentlemen would be glad to
realize on their investment, and hope
through delay that things may drift in
their direction. | tell you the fellow
who undertakes to save for the City is q
monumental ass. Did anybody ever
know Congressman Gardner, or Senator
Hoffman, or our late Mayor Stoy to be
guilty of such thing Well | guess
not.
Will our new Reform Mayor-you
notice spell reform with big r this
time-be guilty of attempting to depart
from existing conditions He promised
to in great style before election, and a
whole lot of people are watching out''
to see him make good his Ante-election
promises. Will he do it, or will he as
sumo that we all want obe bamboQzled
just as we have been ? Time alone can
determine. ARGUS.