Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1898-08-17
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ciety is very stupid" oh, | cant ho
lleve 1t Is SO good as that."-Detroit
Journal.
Hostess-I hope you found the had
comfortable, Mr.. jenkins. jenkins
Excellent, ma'am. l nearly fell asleen
In it.-Tid-Bits.
WAS he secretary or treasurer of thu
company? well, they supposed ba
was only secretary until after he had
gone."-Chicago Journal.
The attorney-You say you could nor
believe this person on oath? The wit.
ness-NO, sir; OF never heard the LADY
swear in me loife, sir.
First Burglar-Any luck lately? Sec.
ond Burglar-No. Worked all night
ON a safe, and when l got it blowed
open it was a folding bed.
The Judge-What made you so Ger.
tain that you had the right of way? The
driver-Sure, an my wagon was the
heaviest, yer honOr.-Life.
Mrs. Straight-My daughter has been
very carefully brought up. Col. Blunt
But, Notwithstanding madam, | find
her a very interesting companion.
Hendry-So you take stock in that
yarn? Why, l wouldn't believe that
story If told 1t myself. Cowgage-
Well, in that case, neither would l.
Deacon Welfxt-I kin read your
thoughts, Miss Nancy. Miss Nancy
tcoyly)-Then what makes you set so
far away, deacon?-New York World.
There are two ways Of making
Maltese cross. you know said he to a
Red Gross girl. 81 know only one" she
returned. "Well, the other is to step on
his tail.'-Judge.
when my wife gets cold can cure
1t In day" what do you give herr"
Nothing; simply say that if she Is
well by night l will take her to the the
ater." Tit Bits.
doctor, who was that man that
screeched and howled so loud when
you We're pulling his toOth?" THAT
was Christian Science friend Of
mine" -Chicago Tribune.
"Ain't little bow-legged?" asked
the dubious young man. "Bow-legged,"
said his tailor. 1.-THE Idea! Your lower
limbs, sir, are absolutely without par
allel." indianapolis Journal.
He-Isn't it disagreeable feature OF
golf, losing the ball so often? She
Oh, no; that's the only way George and
l could get out Of hearing Of the cad.
die for an instant.-Yonkers Statesman.
There's no coal, num-" said Bridget
land the fires are going OUT mo COAL
Why didn't you tell me before"
couldn't tell you there was no coal
mum, when there was COAL" answered
Bridget.
How Is your club for the inter-
change and development of ideas get.
tirg along?" swell, so far, 1t has de-
yeloped the idea in each member that
he is the only man who has any Ideas
indianapolis Journal :
Dear me, that was terrible! Man
fell overheard in midocean the other
day, and never was seen again. said
Hicks. "DrownedW asked Mrs. Hicks,
"Oh, no, of course not. Sprained his
ankle, probably" said Hicks.-Harlem
Life.
EVERY man has his vice." said Ten
spot to Tenterhook, who was fond OF
Offering unsought counsel to his &C.
quaintances. What is my vice, pray|
asked Tenterhook. advice" replied
Tenspot, unhesitatingly.-D Free
Press.
81 suppose that there are many prob
lens which polar explorers seek to
solve" said the unscientific man. Yes
replied the intrepid traveller, "a great
many" What Is bhe most important
one?" Getting back. "-Washlngton
Star.
The fancee of a New Yorker at the
close of his nomination to an office, one
evening during the election campaign
season, hearing Of the event, sent him
a Smyrna date in Its native sugar, ana
with 1t her card on which she had writ
ten: Il love the candy date"
Delia-Professor Monograph is visit
ing you, understand. Doesn't he nnu
the sights and sounds Of the city odo'
Amelia-Not at all. Some berry peu'
dlers passed the house to-day crying
their wares, and the dear old man ask
ed me what college they belonged TO-
Puck.
my Wife" said the tall, lantern-)aw'
ed man, lis as womanly a woman as
you could find, but she can hamine,
nails like lightning "Wonderfui.,
sang the chorus. Lightning the Ian'
lantern-jawed man continued, seldom
strikes twice in the same place -oin
cinnati Enquirer.
"What did you do with that iet,el
that was on my table?' asked Gus po
Smith of the colored boy who ciean'
up his room Il tuck 1t to the posi-
office, sab, and put 1t in de hole
What did you do that forf Dia WV
not see that there was no address VI
tha onvalonaou az saw dar was no