Pine Bluff daily graphic., 1898-03-24
A CLOSE OBSERV YER.
THE YANKEE DRUMmER's STRAIGHT
 TALK ABOUT EUROPE.

many From Big, Red Haired Man--ae
 Says He Kept His Eyes open-Do Yoa
 Think He Did?
 Greater New York is going to be bigger than London, remarked the lit tie man in the cross seat with an air of wisdom.
 'No, siree, 1t isn't said the big red haired man who sat alongside of him as he dusted m invisible speck from his new coat "It won't be marker to London. I've been there.
 What-to London?''
 Sure, have. It was three years ago, and 1 know what Pm talking about Now, it's . strange fact that there are some fellows in our business that Il travel all around and never see any thing. always keep my eyes open in strange towns It gives a man things to talk about and it broadens him. "
 The little man began to eye his con- panion with new interest He pondered his sage words for a minute and said:
 How'd it happen?"
 Why, 1t came about just after left you at St. Louis. I returned to New York and brought back with me $60, 600 worth of orders. That pleased the firm. I can tell you, for no one was doing any business in those days. Our foreign buy CT was i'll and as was pretty well post ed on what the trade wanted the firm said to me:
 Here, Jones, you go over to the continent and do our buying this win ter. Did go? We'll, does duck swim?"
 Where did you go?' asked the little man.
 London, Paris and Germ ny
 "Say, what kind of town is London anyway? I've always wanted to know. !"
 "Well, I'll tell you on the level. It's bum, two for cent place. It's no good, and that's straight I'ye been there. Don't you let anybody fool you about it. You can read all of this jubi- lee stuff you want. and if any one tells you London is any good you just tell him that Jones said it was on the bum !"
 The little mans face frightened up, evidently from the delight of getting authoritative statements first hand, and, with the air of man who wanted to improve each shining hour and add to his stock of knowledge, he said:
 Hell me about London. Is it any thing like New York?'
 Mot a bit, know all about the town. It's 25 years behind tho times It's like New York was before the war Why, honest, now, there are whole rows of houses that look like they were falling down. The streets are dirty and crooked, and all houses are built flush with the street. eeuldnt do any busi- ness there at all. They are saving lot, those English. :"
 Did you see any fine buildings!"
 Not one, except a church or two. Now what I'm telling you is honest. There isn't building in the whole town worth seeing, and if there was you couldn't sec it half the time. It's a dirty. foggy place and not fit to live in. It's an old apple woman of town. Ev- erybody in London drinks ale or gin. I'm telling you straight, it's on the bum. D
 Paris is bigger, isn't it?''
 "Well-er-no Not exactly bigger. London is a whaling big place and don't you make any mistake rode right straight ahead one day from 2 in the morning until in the afternoon, and was i'll London all the time. Par is is different I got some great bar gains there. {"
 Did you take your wife with you to Paris?''
 ''No; she staid in New York because was going on business. can tell you all about Paris, and you can rely on it, for I've been there. D
 The little man s eyes frightened in anticipation, and he said:
 ''Tell me all about it-everything "
 Paris, !" said the big man in the tone of a platform orator, lis all right, and you can say that I said so. You can live there and see the town on 16 francs a day-that is $2-good living too. Sleeping costs you 40 cents night, and you get a room that would cost you $1.5 in New York. Interpreter? Now, that's nonsense that you've read. There were four of us in the party, and when we started out we hired an interpreter When we'd taken about two of them French drinks-cognacks they call lem, sort of brandies they are-we gave the interpreter the grand bounce and we didn't see him again. Three of those cognacks will make you talk French like native. Fact, because tried it. Four of them will make you feel as if you had taken Q $10,000 order for goods that the firm wanted to get rid of. ?
 Did you see any interesting build ings or places?"
 Saw the whole outfit, and it's nc great shakes. The Paris boulevards are pretty fine, though
 The little man locked disannointed