The Providence news. (Providence [R.I.]) 1891-1906, 1898-07-09
copyright. 1881

. ihc tiHie mas now come Wnen lOVely
woman. having stopped to folly in the
way OF leaving everything too late. Is
| searching for a summer place. She
reads guidebooks and sends to all the
| railroads for those pamphlets that de-
scribe cheap and nasty farmhouses. She
answers advertisements by tho hun
| dreds. and she is willing to take every
| bodys advice as to where she is to
abide during the long summer days. She
Is uncertain as to whether it is the
mountain or sea air that she wants.
| She claims a positive contempt for big
hotel, but nothing will induce her to go
| into a boarding house. The kind OF
place she wants is in reality the one
which is next door to heaven-absolute-
| ly the ideal.
In the first place. 1t must be near
i enough the city for the father of the
i tribe to come out Friday evening and
remain until Monday morning. Then 1t
must be too far from the city for all
ones poor relations TO come down and
spend the day. The rooms must be
comfortable, and yet she doesn't pro-
pose to pay the price that the landlord
demands. She would prefer to be near
/ a lake, because she would like the boys
to learn the difference between an eel
and rattlesnake. and yet she would
like to be far enough from the lake to
prevent there being a funeral in the
family. She wishes the boys to learn to
swim. but she has a sort of an idea that
in learning this accomplishment they
would better begin In the bathtub. She
doesn't know that the little tikes have
been swimming this many day and
that they learned In what might be
called a practical fashion-that is to
say, the biggest boy threw the littlest
one in the water and warned him If he
didn't swim to shore he would not only
drown. but get thrashing.
Then she would like an aristocratic
neighborhood--a neighborhood where
there are some nice young fellows who
are likely to inherit some good old
ducats--but IL must be the sort of place
where aristocracy and shabbiness go
hand in hand, since on account of the
war she must economize, and the girls
have got to wear last seasons frocks
fixed over. Then she feels as IL she had
a longing to get where she would. be
free from the bondage of servants and
able to eat her dinner as IL she were an
independent woman. So she travels for
hours on hot day over dusty road
only to find that advertisements do not
always picture things as they are and
that the country home so beautifully
described doesn't compare for GOODNESS
with her own house in the city. Then
she goes cavorting around trying to ind
a resting place where there Is country
air. Thank goodness, you can have plen-
ty of that without being charged extra
for every mouthful, plenty of grass.
mountains at the back OF Ii, water not
very far from 1t. fresh butter and veg
etables, milk from a cow and not from
a tin can, and chickens that were not
witnesses of the late q. Washington's
will!
IT Is almost unnecessary to say that
this place is never found but every
blessed woman among US looks for 1t
every summer, sheds bitter tears over
the unreliability of printed descriptions
and then trots off to the best place that
she can get and tries to be happy. IL
there is anybody in the world who
knows a rather lonely and somewhat
lorn place where they know how to
make corn bread, serve chickens fried
in gravy after the Maryland fashion,
make a good cup OF coffee and where
permission is accorded one to dress as
one pleases, to read when one pleases
and not TO get too intimate with the
family unless one so desires. let her or
him write to me. don't pretend to say
there are not such places. 1 only say
that somehow or other we don't seem to
find them, and yet we don't demand |
much.
The average country boarding house
from the city who has come TO rest. |
She objects fiercely to your wearing a
cloth skirt, "a shirt waist, lying in
hammock and reading. She thinks IL is
your duty as a Christian TO bring along
all your best frocks. TO show them to
her, TO tell her how much they cost and
who made them, and then when the
usual fair Is given she prefers that you
should dress as IL you were going 10
the opera, for then her special chum
can whisper to her: "Oh, I say. Marthy.
amt them city women wicked, showing
their necks that way and their arms all
barel I call IL perfectly indecent! And
before the minister tool" And the lady |
who entertains few guests for n con-
sideration says I'm response: "Welli |
Well When you have seen as much OF |
the world "a l have--I once staid nearly |
two weeks I'm New York city-you will |
know that as bad as these women look |
they might be worse" And YOU hear |
this doubtful prnise. But when o party |
go 10 a farmhouse and lie around on
the grass and In hammocks and read |
and play with the chickens and fnd ont |,
exactly how much intelligence n turkey |
has (and if you devoted a month 20 |
studying a turkey. as I once did. YOU /