Evening journal., 1898-05-02
A POOR SUBSTITUTE

"A IOOIN D0A9D IL ~ -
The man who shaves himself and
homes his own razors is no friend OF |
the barber, but he establishes for him |
self a reputation Of local character as |
an economist OF the tonsOrial sort |
There resides on Van Buren street a |
Young economist Of this sort. He is |
connected with one OF the local ice |
companies and is a pretty good sort OF |
a fellow. His tonsorial outfit Is COM
plete and usually in good order, neces- !
sarily so by reason of the tender char
acter of his face One OF his business
friends recently told the Wayfarer an
amusing incident connected with one OF
his shaves. After he had scraped of
the beard he took a sponge and washed
off the lather. Then he applied bay
rum or some other lotion and dried his
face as best he could with a towel.
When he went to get mis- powdered
chalk to put on his face he found that
he had used It all. The same condition
had existed at prior times, but there
being babies in the house and one or
two boxes OF talcum powder within
reach. ne never suffered any inconven-
ience by reason of his improvidence.
On this occasion NE went to the baby's
talcum powder box, filled the pun full
or Ine DOWQlIt anu dppllNh IL lAbtioiA9
20 his face. It struck him at the time
that the powder did not have either
the agreeable smell or effect that tai
cum powder usually had upon his SEN
sitive cuticle, but he dismissed the
matter as one OF purely imaginative
character and continued with the work
OF making his toilet.
Later on he repaired to the living
apartments of the house and inciden-
tally mentioned that the talcum pow
der in the baby's box did not have the
same agreeable effect that it usually
had.
'You certainly didn't powder your
face with the powder which is in the
baby's box" his sister said.
''Most assuredly," he replied. why
shouldn't II"
"Wlhy. you goosel" she retorted.
"That isn't talcum powder at all.
am going to clean house and that is
insect powder which l purchased down
town to-day and put in that box for
use tomorrow in driving the water
bugs away"
He made break for the bathroom,
but not quickly enough to escape the
hearty laughter at his expense. In
future he will regard every youngsters
powder box with mingled feelings Of
dlstrust and resentment.
CARLISLE AS A PROPHET.
Trainmaster Carlisle, OF the Mary
land division OF the p, w. g. B. rail
road, is plain man himself and he
does not like to see any man, no mat
ter what may be his station, putting on
more frills than is necessary either in
the matter of dress or in the use oi
language in the transaction OF bust
ness While lounglng around the p.
w a. B. station in this city on Satur-
day evening the Wayfarer, in conver.
sation with a railroad man, heard tn,
following anecdote illustrative OF this,
III was on the first day that thu
United States troops were SEN
through here on their way to Chicka
mauga Park. For the delectatioI
Of the soldiers hot coffee and sand
witches were provided in abundance a
the station, but no special preparation
were made for the officers. Colone
McKibbon was in command of the regi
ment and he sent word to Superinten
dent Barnard that he would like t
have a dining car provided for him ant
his fellow-officers. The superintendent
replied that ne had no dining car, an,
that 1t was a matter of impossibilit,
for him to supply one here. This mad
the doughty colonel indignant and h
sent back peremptOry demand tina
one be supplied Immediately, as he di
not propose to eat like a common sol
der This ugly message not only In
censed Superintendent Barnard bu
was equally exasperating to TrainmaF
ter Carlisle
THAT fellow will be d. glad to ca
out OF a trough before he gets back!
the latter was heard to exclaim, as tn
messenger was sent for a second tim
te inform the colonel that there was L
dining car available for his use.
HE FORGOT THE DATE.
BY the time that some Of the funn
things which happen in our home con
munity reach the Wayfarer's ears the
are a little out OF date, hut many
them still retain their original favo
and here is one Of them, just a mont
old, and still as good as the day tn,
10 occurred. The hero is employed Q
the local street railway, and he
neither a conductor nor a motorma
On April ] he found the following tel
phonic message waiting for him at II
office, with his wife as the reputC
sender OF it:
The water pipes have burst al
are flooding the house. Come home in
mediately"
Now, there was no skating on Apl
/, and the meteorological condition
were not such as would lead a thinkiI
man to worry about water pipes burs