Kansas City journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1897-1928, 1898-02-09
DID NOT DIE ON scHEDULETIME
James Crawford Was In His CONN
Waiting, but Was Dis
appofnted.

] appOluteu.
Arrangements were all completed for the
funeral of wealthy James Crawford, of
Ashland. Wis. His house was crowded with
mountaineering friends; the undertaken
was there with his plume-decked hearse;
six pallbearers, dressed in suits OF black
and looking very sad, stood in readiness
TO carry the body from the house to the
hearse. But the corpse was missing. Craw-
ford was there in his handsome casket,
ready and willing to become a corpse. but
the grim reaper failed to appear upon
the scene at the appointed time, accord
ing to contract. and 1t therefore became
necessary to postpone the funeral indeti-
nftely.
Now the wealthy Mr.. Crawford is looking
for a certain fortune teller whose nom de
guerre is Patheus de Grasso. and who is
charged by the irate Crawford with haV-
ing caused the arrangements to be made
for the funeral in question. as well as the
attending disappointment to the mourning
friends and all others concerned, includ-
ing the would-be corpse. 1t is suspected by
the police that Crawford has been victim
lied by a tramp named Gately. who was
released from the Douglas county work
house only a few days ago.
Crawford was never In better health
than at the time appointed for his fun
eral. He is a good-natured but very eccen-
trio old man. possessing a fortune of $780,
coo. the principal part of which is invested
i'll registered government bonds. He is
about &c years of age, and for the last ten
years-since the death of his wife-has been
living the life of a %recluse. with no COM
panion but a big Newfoundland dog. He
has always been considered a man Of
sound mind and good judgment. except up
on the one subject-death. Though appar-
emily in good health and good spirits at
all times. the old man has constantly hoped
and prayed for death since the demise of
his wife ten years ago. Whenever question:
ed regarding his reasons for this strange
desire, Crawford invariably answered that
he had lived long enough on this earth,
and wanted to try the other world. where
going on. He has often been heard to eX-
press the opinion that a person is allotted
but seventy years of life on earth. and
should die promptly upon the expiration
OF that number Of years.
A few days before Christmas a seedy
looking Individual with a long black mus
tache and a foreign accent called at Craw-
vited to partake of a cold spread inside,
and while doing so ventured the informa-
ton that he was a fortune teller by pro-
the future Of his host.
There is only one thing that I want
foretold," the eccentric Crawford said. IF
you will tell me the exact date and hour of
my death I'll give you s25 cash.
So the hour Of Crawford's death was
fixed at 2 o'clock on the afternoon of jan
uary l9, 1898. The fortune teller received
his S25 and went his way Rejoicing. hut
was arrested the next day and sent to the
workhouse for being drunk and disorderly.
Crawford resolved to spend his remaining
days on ~earth.which numbered about thir-
Accordingly he employed a k and
kept open house for his friends every day,
serving expensive refreshments at all times.
and occasionally engaging an orchestra for
the entertainment Of his guests. This was
continued until the eve of the appointed
concluded with a grand final farewell dance
and anque which was attended by seven.
ty,five acquaintance. Upon this occasion
all arrangements were made for the tuner
al. and the next morning Crawford dressed
himself in a new suit of black, babe the UNI
dertaker and the housekeeper a cheerful
farewell, and crawled into the casket to
await the coming of death. He was with
out an ailment of any description, but never
doubted that his end would come at the
appointed time.
Shortly after the noon hour guests began
to arrive. and by l o'clock the parlors were
crowded with men and women. In the
meantime Crawford reposed in his coffin In
the middle of the front parlor. with eyes
closed and face serene. waiting for the end.
in hand ready to start the funeral with a
rush at the proper time, and the doctor sat
beside the coffin with watch in hand.
AT last the clock struck two. The doctor
leaned over and scrutinized the face of the
man in the coffin. Then he slowly shook his
head for the information of the guests and
composed himself for another walt. At 2:15
the doctor took another look at his patient
with the same result. Then he held a con-
the two men went over to the casket TO
consult with the corpse. :
Crawford. and everybody settled down
again. Three o'clock struck. still no angel
of death. Another conference with the
the funeral indefinitely. The would-be
corpse arose from his cramped position and
sat upon the. lid to address the audience.
Ladies and gentlemen" he said, 81 have
been disappointed and so have you. l have
been swindled, but will have revenge, and
promise you a first-class funeral before
long. if I have to commit suicide to furnish
the corpse
Crawford says he will not get caught
again in like manner. He intends to devote
The remaining days of his life to the spend
ing of his fortune. and in order to facilitate
operations in that line will move to AL
bany, N. Y, where his nephew lives.