Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1898-08-21
TWO BR CHIT YARNS.
BY BAksDN JONES
WHY ADAM FELL.

Z. A little colOred fellow and his aunt
were standing on corner across from
I: where a gr~up OF various colored
: youngsters were feasting on melon.
i 'Jis' look there, aunty, see that
(, Shorty Brown rootin' is nose in that
watermillion.' After a GoHy,
! wish / had some O that million"
(, Don't you go ovah thar begin
aroun Don't you know, honey, yo'
paws got big watermillion in de
ceilah? Deed ne is, honey; an it's
| fo' you an de res of us. You needn't
/ make no hog O. youse'f like dem boys
| you jis' wait till we git home an
| you almos' bust"
"Watelmillion bout de bestest
! thing there is TO eat, amt it, aunty?"
''CO'se it's de bestest; OATS why
| cullud folks likes it. Ought to be de
bestest-caused all de Misty in &c
world"
How'd it cause de Misty, aunty?"
| Law me, Appolonaris, dean you
know dat yet? 1 tell you how it was.
De fus' man was name Adam, an he
| was black man. De Lord put i'm in
| big ga den an back of it was a wa
| termill1on patch. De Lord he say to
! Adam, Adam, you kin eat de bana
mas, an de peaches, an de peahs, an
| all dat you kin fin, but doal monkey
wild de watermillions-dey's green
/ Adam he browse aroun an eats
! peaches an plums till he's full up an
| presently ne see &c watermillion
! patch.
! Laws sakes, honey, dey was de
| bigges' millions in dat patch! Bigger
dan a Gawgy million? Huh! dey was
| mos big as bar'ls.
Adam he go out an pick out de
| bigges' one an jes' as he was gettin
ready to gouge into er, de Lord ap-
pear, an lie say, Adam, what TO- you
| gwine to do wifi dat watermillion?
| Use gwine to eat 'er,' said Adam
'E5an you know l said fo' you not to
| eat dat million?' said de Lord. KANT
| help it, said Adam; Use gwine to eat
| 'er anyhow But l tell you dat mil
liens green, said de Lord. Den Adam
he thump her, and den he scrape 'er
wifi his fingh nail, den he squeeze her
! an' she SCUM ali right, an he say
/ Lord, 'Ones''iy b'lieve dat millions
ripe an l bettah eat 'er.
| Den de Lord got ruty mad. You
! Adam, said de Lord, ''ef you eat dat
million you'll have a mess O. trouble
an al kinds O mis'ry, an all you
| kin folk'h have all kinds o Misty an
trouble Len Adam ne scratch his
head an thunk an den at las he says:
Lord, | spec you'll have to bring on
| de Misty an de trouble, cause I'm
| gwine to eat dat million anyhow
AN Alam he jes' done eat dat mil
hon-shuah! And dat's what cause
all de trouble now
+ why you s'pose Adam like dat mil
lion so Wei, aunty?" asked the inter-
ested little fellow
Why Adam like 'er. Why do cul-
lud folks all like watermilion? Jist
cause dey know what's good; dat S
why, honey. WatermilliOn b'longs to
de cullued folks anyhow, cause when
Ham went inter de ark ne TUX pock-
etful @ seed an" de fust thing he do
/ aftah de watah go down he plant a
| eats 'en-dey kind O. 'aiverous ami
mails anyhow, an dey jest eats every
thing dey gifts dere hans on.
Come long here, AppClinaris, ives
gwine over home, an Ell yo' paw doan
i get dere On time, weil jest cut dat
| million anyhow
ORDERING COAL BY MENTAL. TEL
EPATHY.
This theory of the transference of
thought, or mental telepathy, as some
/ cali It, is all right" SAID Burns, as ne
whisked the asnes OFT the end of his
| cigar.
What is it? What's it about, any
how" asked Wise Kelly, as he lit
/ a stogie that was darker than a Cuban
| insurgent.
Its like this" said Burns. You
! concentrate your mind on some partic-
ular person and keep thinking about
| them, and presently from some unac-
countable reason the person feels that
you are thinking Of him. You keep
on thinking, and in some cases, under
favorable conditions, the person knows
almost the exact line CT your
| thoughts"
do you believe that?" asked Kelly.
of course. do" Burns replied.
Now, for an easy example take a
| crowd at an opera house-and no doubt
you have all tried this-just keep
thinking of some person you see pres
| eul anu KEEP YOUR eyes fastened upon
| him-presenty you will notice the
person get restless like and then turn
around and look straight at you Of
! course, he don't know why, but he
! does it: it's mental telepathy."
| Every one acknowledged the truth
of this and their interest deepened.
They began to look upon Burns as the
! leader of a new Gull.
The most curious thing along this
| line occurred a few days ago." contin-
| ued Burns. LAS l left the house Mon
! day morning, my wife said: Now,
/ dent forget to order that load of coal.
! Of course l said l wouldn't l thought
of that coal all the way to the Office and
as soon as | g0t there something else
! must have entered my mind, for l
| forgot it. At supper my wife mention
| ed the coal again and l acknowledged
| that l had overlooked it, but promised
| faithfully to telephone thes order as
socn as | got to the Office next morn
/ ing. l forgot it again-just like a fell
{ low forgets and carries one Of his wife's
i letters around for a week or so. That
night | had to bulge the truth a little;
- CIINT