The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1898-07-09

lions OF firewater, and the most active Of
them, In undulatlng tones, tinged with
q deep Htbernlau accent, maintained
that the correct spelling was "o.a-l,"
while the companion with whom he had
made the bet, was not 50 certain IN his
claim that It was apelt "o-w-l," yet was
more certain that "o-a-W. was incorrect,
The scribe when appealed to reached
acros his desk for his old friend, Web
ster. and soon disclosed 10 all eyes the
picture Of the blinking bird. and its
spelling, "o-w-l." Was the man who
previously differed convinced? Well,
there are few men who give In easy, and
this gentleman retired ungracefully
with, the remark that "he didn't care
what Webster or any other edition said.
he would hunt every newspaper office in
town till he'd find The right spellIn.'
There Is diplomacy in all things, but
the best laid plans of mice and men
aft gang aglee," saying which Will
come home to wheeling gentleman
well versed In the tntricacles OF poli-
ties, and whose little ruse on a Baltt-
more & Ohio train, on the Pittsburgh die
Vlsion last Saturday afternoon, was
fraught with dismal failure He occu-
pied a chair car, and longed to enjoy the
pleasures OF q cigar at the same time.
There was no place to smoke except
on the rear platform, but through the
open door, few feet away he saw a
lady sitting on a chair on the platform
with her brother. How to induce her 70
leave the chair and platform so the
Wheeling colonel could take her place
and delight In his longed-for smoke was
the problem that confronted an astute
politician. II have It," he remarked to
his friend. Then he pressed a button,
which brought a dusky porter on the
scene. Porter" said the colonel, THAT
lady out on the platform there will get
her waist all black from smoke and cln-
ders; she ought to get in here" Only
too anxious TO please. the tip-lover
withdrew, returning shortly with a
newspaper, which he put on the window
rod at the lady's back, to prevent her
waist from being solled, The lady didn't
even notice this attention, but remained
in her chair, oblIvious TO all but the
scenery In front And the porter got
no tip, and the plans OF the politician
who wanted q smoke went gllmmering.
The slot machine now jlngles forth
its merry lay again in the places where
men are wont to congregate. and the
verdane youth and his susceptible senior
proceed once more to buck the tiger.
The proper way to beat the machine Is
with an axe, but acting in conformity
with the saying that "a fool and his
money are soon parted" the man With
a pocketful OF nlckels goes on the BELIEF
that he can break any machine by put
tl.g nickles in to bring more out. So
he drops his nickels In the slot, turns
the crank, the wheels whirr around and
then stop but the man doesn't until he
Is led away. He may think Of quitting
when his pocket grows lighter, but who
wants to show the white feather with a
lot Of other fellows looking at you?
Slot machines were made for theic own
ers, else they wouldn't BE- made, and
the saloon-keeper who said he would
have spent the summer at Atlantic City
II the authorities hadn't prohibited the
machines some time ago, knew whereof
he smoke. But it's better to toss the ct'in
into a machine than into a whlskey jug.
once In a while some fellow does hit
the machine for a goodly sum, and an
Ohio county farmer says ne struck
good thing, he says, the other day, by
Dlayin' one O. them slot machines In
front Of Market street drug store. It
only cost cent a throw" he chuckled,
'.but hit It every time. Yes, sir, !!
didn't miss once In gettin' a piece o.
chewin' gum, and pretty near so: an
armful in an hour"
A marriage shortly to be announced
OF two South Side people IS an indirect
result of the war at any rate its con-
summation was FASTENED by Uncle
SANS call for volunteers. The prospec-
tive groom few days ago had an en-
gagement to take his fair one to pic
mic at the park. and was to call for her
after supper. Not feeling we'll, or feel
ing too good, he quit work at noon, and
after removing surplus beard and dom
ming his Sunday clothes, he called a.
her home. Her mother met him, and
the two made IN the ioka. witch wc9