The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1898-01-25
BILL ARP ON 'POSSUM.
He DiscOurses on the Filthy Varmint
and Likewise on Various Topics OF
Current Interest.

He Discourscs on the Filthy Varmint
and Likewise on Various Topics OF
Current Interest.
"'Possum seems to be the slogan of
State politics. 1t Is among the first
Latin words | ever learned to decline,
and means 81 am able" AS filthy
varmint decline it still, and if had
been invited to the feast should have
but not 'possum. A buzzard would be
as palatable, for one Is a day scavenger
and the other hunts for carrion by
night. Not long ago Mr.. Hale told me
at Rising Fawn that his boy caught
three on three successive nights by
sitting his steel trap on a dead hog In
the woods, and Mr.. Young told me
yesterday that the last one his dog
treed was In the carcass of dead horse
Now, II q 'possum Is kept up in coop
or pen for a month and fed on decent
food, his cily carcass might be fitten
for scalawag or o hungry darkey
Colonel Gambler in his letter sings the
praises and the oily juices of the North
| Georgia 'possum, but turns up his nose
at the piney woods breed. The diff
ference is that dead dogs and hogs and
mules are few and far between In the
piney woods, and the 'possums can't
get enough carrion to get fat. But
'possum Is just now the political fad
and politician will eat anything for
that DR.. Miller used to say that he
could eat crow, but he didn't banker
after 1t. We college boys used to have
'possum suppers away In the night,
but Hansel, who furnished them, Kept
them up and sOall fed them. The
chief satisfaction, however, was In
breaking the rules and dodging the
professors and tutors. Jim Warren
and Chess Howard used to give lnid
night suppers and pull up the 'possun
and t.ters in o basket by = rope anG
take It in at third story window
Well, the nation has got slogan
too. Cuba and Hawaii are still OF
deck as shuttlecocks, and the game |,
long and uncertain. Cuba Is a frui
that Is about ripe, and ought to bt
pulled before 1t rots on the tree bu
Hawaii is es green as q gourd. Cubs
: Is 400 miles long, and Is near by ant
, should be purchased just Mxe w
3 bought Florida from Spain; but Hawai-
is 1900 miles from our Pacific coast
and all the islands put together hav
! not as much area as a single county i
lS6de. ucy Say W0 Wbbb ~ loT
3 cOaing station. We have 1t now TO
q that, and can keep 1t during peace
but itwould take all OF our little nav
t to hold 1t during war. 1t looks yer
!, like the whole ploJ of annexation is
J. personal job for few men. They ar
l. trying to alarm rs with the threat the
# II we do not auneA 1t England will.
don't reckon England wants 1t yer
1t bad. In case ola great war, 1t woul
n take good part OF her navy to hold |
r, and the game is not worth the candl
lie Our poor little navy wont justify us
le annexing anything, and we can't hurl
up any more battleships under I'll
Id Dingley tariff and the pension fraud
IN England has l5 battleships,
I'd cruisers,6 gunboats, SO torpedo boa
a and war steamers--in all 1l6 keel
ly The United States has 6 battleshiI
or 18 cruisers, 10 gunboats, 6 monito
III and torpedo boats--in all, 30 kee
How Is that for war? Japan has mo
he war keels afioat than the United Stat,