The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1898-03-13
IF YOU QUARREL WITH HER
NE MIG HTY CAREFUL ABoUT TIM
ING THE ROW.

,,,dv 10 please woman. This doesn't happen
ot,en. though. The average man seeks the COM
..nionship of his women friends In order that
= NAV be pleased. American men have to
work. and they have to work hard. After q
dav nj business, which has for the most part
amounted to a fight against the world, the
desh. and the devil, man is in no trim to specu-
late on the art of pleasing his feminine fellow
beings. That is too much to expect of him. He
hos barely time to rush home. fling himself
into his dress suit, swallow his dinner at a gait
that nuts digestion completely to rout and
isayes the way clear to bad temper, ana get up
- down or over to S'tcenth street to spend an
,veninr with poll, or Molly or Dolly. as the
.ose NAV be. II he arrives in an nmiable mood,
tbe visited should feel thankful, and should not
hr an instant expect him to cater to her whims.
However, about once in n lifetime a woman
does meet a man who actually shows n dispo-
s,,ion to please the opposite sex in little things.
The average man. every woman knows. is good
and kind and true TO women, but no is not
always so thoughtful Of their feelings and COM
tort as he is of his own. Perhaps that's just as
veil. for il he were. there would be no need Of a
future state. This old world would be a heaven on
Earth. and women wouldn't have to go through
that discipline which is popularity believed to DO
40 good for tho development Of their characters
and which is certainly good for the complete
destruction of their nerves.
certain woman met her one man not long
nro who honestly wants to please the women.
snd said so.
"What's tho mattcri You seem dumpy to-
hight" remarked the girl as soon as the man
was comfortably settled among the cushions on
the couch, and had the smoking tabaret fixed at
lust the right angle.
"Yes, I feel real cross with myself tonight"
he answered, blowing a series Of rings upward
with a preoccupied air. You and l are the
best Of comrades, so I'm going to toll you all
about 1t. I always feel that I can talk to you
lust as l can with ono of the fellows that I care
most for. You know, or perhaps I'm such a
~blockhead at the business that you haven't OBJ
served 1t yet, that I faithfully try to please my
women friends in little things. 1 let the other
men do the big things for them and I try to do
all the significant. and 1 use the word In both
senses, things that you girls like. Well, it's
harder work than bucking against tho market
In these war times. You know, l have a great
weakness for Elizabeth. Well, the other day
we had a little tilt-one or those epistolatory
tilts you women are so fond of. She wrote and
accused me OF something disagreoable, and l
replied in a truthful and tender but digniled
way. 1t turned out that she misconstrued every
sentence in my note. and here came the most
absolutely cold and cruelty worded note from
her that l ever read. That settles it, l said to
myself. Il shan't waste any more ink, but shall
60 straight to Elizabeth and talk it all over
l did. and that's where 1 made the mistake.
worked all day with a fury born of rage, and
you can gamble on 1t that everybody with whom
1came in contact set me down as a very brusque
fellow. That night I couldn't get to Elizabeth's
soon enough. Imagine my amaZemcnt when
she walked into the drawing room in a mood
sweetness itself and rcordiality and apparent
sincerity. Her attitude for the minute throw
me of my guard. but pulled myself tose,her
woman has been cruelty unjust to you, and
yon must, show her that you aren't to be
fittings at once and gave her some very plain
talk. | said a good deal. for was wrought up.
e eaS dITh I She sSs @ seemcd to feel spi too d deeply go to s sas
what she wanted to say. You know she is one
Of those women so noble in her nature that
thought than her body is with her soul" and he
stopped to light another cigarette and to look
""WeIiT = said the girl, interrogativcly;
di SWe aIas shs only :, said ba I.s ,Tm sorryf c Diee on,I !
say sayn that un I'm sorry. There's ns resa Nothing mo snn t tRat
lean say. Il I'd, been a half decent chap ia
have taken that girls hands, in mine and told
never have thought of the matter again. But
Ho. didn't do that. What did I dol Isaw that
ru nS% 'Rf It P IN %nd Fl I @ snioged E h as t i@@ FsRs S as
savage Indian enjoys sealping a white man,
as thoroughly as q darky cook enjoys
oughly as a cat enjoys tantalizing a mouse.
But got tired after a whilea and wanted to make
the mouse. Elizabeth was still sweet, but there
was such a hurt, disappointed look in her eX;
pressiye eyes; She said; Why, of course. IT, all
ge, all about it. but we never have. I couldn't
reestabllsh our usuall relationship. that night,
I've done my best. Two been. oh. SO thoughtful
about all the little attentions that Elizabeth
cares for, but there Is an indctinable something
between us that the remembrance of her birth
day, huge lunches Of her favorito red roses. the
newest book by her favorite author Of the day,
OIL cannot vanGuish, or haven't so far. Do you
wonder that ! feel out of sorts with myself and
sneFynody eiset There now, I'm glad I've told
81 wonder that you don't feel idiotic." an
sMered me girl. wEo is noted for her common
sense. Why cant you men learn not to pick a
quarrel with a girl or to bring up anything dis
ssseeaole as soon as you get with her. Ifeel so
secret well h0 En e%"s to t !" my so sex. 'S Sesa ase Be a% cross g
wilma girl Mt the beginning or end of n visit.
whyi sImplyfo r this reason: II is a bad thing
ostart or end the evening in bad humor. The
p pIas TO DO Is to start out by establishing q
and it is easy enough to repstablish tn,
have in mind how pleasant things were during
.ne Irst part OF the visit. and both are eager to
ssS BACK on the same footing; both make con-
LESSONS, both make an effort. and one comes
nall way to meet the other and harmony reigns
U Uh more, But start as you did the other
night, and there is no pleasant impression on the
Emis mind Tor you to play upon. Anybody can
~ why II u bad to quarrel at the end of an
tSpen,ng. no explanation is necessary concern
~ mai. There is no time to patch up things;
friends part In a disaerceablo frame of mind to-
Eard one another and the breach broadens with
tt Wssng over it in the interval be
mou'u be the little things that you
nen would be thoughtful about in seek
NV 10 please women. That's what we mean ny
esie things. We don't mean that we want to
ESLea ana have gifts showered on us. Bah! |
s1HaIa give you points OH that subject. but it's
tesogether another story, 80 | won't. / do en-
va you. however. and / wish every man in tho
Morni would do the same, to be most careful not
a. ;onr manner of quarrclling with women. hut
I'M time. Many a friendship has been broken
%t"reh man and woman because the man WAS
i%,ou.lsh az to begin or end an evening call with
lhnnk you." answered the man earnestly.
Al Wonder what / can do to ohliterate that first
n agreeable impression from Elizabeth's mind.
one'p me out won't your
"aflerS are gayer than ever before. No wo-
nan dreams OF wearing plain elastic bands to
AeoP up her Observation-Disclosures. Indeed. gar
serS are now made so many colored that they