davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
THE FUTURE OF soupAN.

The darkest stain upon the memory
of the great Gladstone was his indecis-
ion, his hesitation, at the beginning of
Lord Wolseley's expedition for the re-
lief of Gordon. And, like the vacilla-
ton which marred McKinley's record
in our war with Spain, it will remain
while the recollection of the tragic con-
sequence is on the mind of man
There was an Indifference about the
undertaking which left Wolseley as
poorly equipped for his campaign as
the American army was left in its in
vasion of Cuba The very reluctance
with which both expeditions were per-
United to proceed, clogged them with
that neglect which has never ceased to
be a matter of reproach in England,
and will be so regarded in our own
similar affair
Now that Omdurman has been taken,
and with such ease, wonder begins
anew that Wolseley failed so near his
goal But it was not his fault. 1t was
the lack of sympathy behind him, the
lack Of interest shown by those at the
head of his government.
AS the american sailors ana SDfUlSTS
adopted as their battle cry, Remember
the Maine so did the Anglo Egyptians
force their march. step by step. through
scorching sand and choking dust, across
the desert of Soudan, cheering each
other with the shibboleth which sound
ed afterwards in battle above the chant
of the bowling Dervishes-"Reme
Gordon
The impression of weakness left by
the fight of the British, years ago.
when they retired without glory from
the valley of the Nile,has given place
to new impression. This re-conquest
of the Soudan implies a further English
southwark movement toward the max
ing of an African empire from Cairo
to Cape Town. And, all vindictive and
imperial purposes aside. the expulsion
of the Dervishes from Omdurman re-
stores the valley of the upper Nile to
civilization" says a London cores
pondent of the Commercial-Advertiser
For nearly fifteen years. the Dervishes
have harried it, putting the native
tribes to the sword, in some cases al
most to determination pillaging them
of their possessions. wasting their VIII
lagos, until whole districts that were
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
Force of Habit.

Lord Kelvin. the celebrated English sci
enlist, has just celebrated his 74th birth
day He was born in Belfast, ireland. For
over 80 years he has held the chair OF MAJ
ural philosophy at Glasgow University,
and this was rightly considered so re-
markable that in 1896 the jubilee was en-
Enthusiastically celebrated. A good story is
related of his lecturing- methods at the
university. AS a professor of science, he
can use long words in such formidable ar
ray as would make a dictionary break its
binding with horror. During a course of
lectures once on magnetism. for instance.
he defined an ideal magnet as IAN infinite
" long. Infinitely thin, uniform and uni;
bar" and the misguided students vocifer-
ously cheered. which caused the professor
to say: Silence" The definition was
made and cheered, with the usual repri-
mand. frequently during the lectures.
Once. near the conclusion. however. the
students did not cheer. but Lord Kelvin.
from force Of habit. raped out Silence"
the same as before.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Tie Tribune. which endorses Arthur
Browns party. intimates that the Dem
ocratic candidates are for bimetallism,
but will change when the national plat
form Of the party changes. In the first
place. the-plateorm will not be changed.
ing apparatus In the second place,
the Democratic candidates are actually
lending their humble services to the
silver cause. while the only doubt cast
upon them comes from the goldbug or
ganization. In the third place. the
Tribune didn't need to wait until its
party changed the platform.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

The following is original with the
Ogden Standard and explains itself:
We declare that the protection issue is
dead FOR all purposes in this campaign.
but We pledge ourselves, if we get a
majority in congress, to knock that
DingIey bin heli-west and crooked, and
that those sheepmen who have been
leaving millions Of dollars in the state,
shall. under Democratic rule, eat hum
bic grass. We pledge ourselves, if VIC
torious at the polls. to turn every Re-
publican and Populist out Of Office,
leaving only Democrats to draw the
coined dollars from the public treasury.
We declare chat there are many ether
things we viii 90 ii elected but deem
it unwise to say anything about them
now
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Our morning contemporary should
ceniine itself to facts a little more
closely. It should own up that the nom
partisan movement was originated and
manipulated by and for Arthur Pratt,
an administration Republican; that it
was supported by the Tribune, which
has since rejoined the Republican party
upon the platform, anything to beat
the Democrats; that the cause of sill
yer was. threatened, in a measure, by
the men elected on Tire non-partisan
ticket: that every non-partisan who
voted for city bonds, voted for gold
clause; that they persisteEtly and re-
peatedly voted for a gold clause; that
such an action would have been a re-
proach UPON the advocates of free coin
age If it had been successful; that only
the determined efforts of the men eject
ed in opposition to that non-partisan
movement prevented the disaster and
disgrace. Our neighbor shouldn't forget
the disgust even it showed at the atti-
tude of its bipartisan creatures.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

: Republican organ insinuated that
the Democratic candidates for the legis-
lature were not up to its standard in
silver lore Naturally, we took it's ideal
to be the man it is supporting for con-
gress. At least we could not believe
sist upon candidates for the legislature
knowing more about this national issue
than its congressional candidate knows.
Therefore we offered TO back in a debate
or examination, written or oral, one Of
the legislative candidates against its
candidate for congress. But the Tribune
calls this AN evasion" How can its
doubts be satisfied if not by some such
test2
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
THE SALT LAKE HERAID lrHURsDAY. SEPTEMBER 5.1sss


in the. country month. and the house
was closed up; yet the gas bill was as
'.of course, Gas meters never take a
vacation Is
Chicago News: Il say, I've an offer
TO go to work for a West End wholesale
house, What would you do if you were
After a careful inspection: Il think I
would black en-
Chicago Tribune: Mrs Chugwater-
Josiah. l see a good deal in the papers
about internal machines. What is an
Internal machine?''
Mr.. Chugwater-WeI, sometimes 1
think it's a lawn mower, and sometimes
think it's a piano"
Judge: Uncle Reuben-Silas don't talk
so much bout politics as he used to- A
couple OF years ago he was the best
posted Teller on national finances 1 ever
saw.
Uncle Joshua-He was; but since then
he's raised some rattlin' good crops.
Puck: We have all heard of the man
who bit off more than he could chew.
But there was another man. He at
intellect would permit. And. of the two.
he presented by far the most lamentable
spectacle.
Indianapolis. Journal: Though soldiers
are paid by the month"; said the Cheer
full Idiot, and paused.
We'll. what?'' asked the transient
boarder
''The commission will be paid for peace
work"
Pittsburg Bulletin: A number of chill
dren were making a good deal of noise,
and their mother, after rebuking them
several times. at last said: If l have
to speak TO you again, L shall punish
some of you.
At this the youngest child rolled off the
awhile, remarked: Then, mamma, I'd
advise you not to speak.
Judy: An eccentric old gentleman
placed in a field on his estate a board
with the following generous offer painted
thereon: Il viii give this field to any
man who is contented."
He soon had an applicant; We'll. my
man. are you a contented telloW? asked
the old gentleman.
Yes, sir: very"
''Then why do you want my field?"
The applicant did not wait to reply.
New York Evening Journal: The sim
pie children of the desert contemplated
the mirage with feelings akin TO awe
Look cried the child with the long.
gray whiskers "A phantom train! How
very real it seemsi''
Probably it's mistr' exclaimed the
Otner Child
Curiousiv enough these persons had
never lived in any suburbs or been in any
sense commuters
Cleveland Leader: The boy was crying
bitterly. Whats wrong, my SOM? the
kind-hearted man asked.
Il didn't m-mow the lawn when pa
told me to-
''Ah! And he punished you. then, did
hep
''N-no: not just then. He said he
would-wouldn't have no insurgents
around the pla-place."
And you are weeping because he called
you an insurgent?'
''N-no. l told him they w-would al
ways b-be insurgents when they was
SDaniards around tryin to rule them.
That's when it ha-happened."
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
CARLYLE and Titan.

At Royal Academy dinner, several ar
lists and literary men waxed enthusiastic
in praise of fayorite painters. His glo-
rious coloring is fact about Titan" said
one. "And his glorious drawing is an
other fact about Titan" cried a second.
Carlyle, who had been listening. inter-
rupted the remarks by saying. with slow
deliberation: And here l sit, a man made
in the image of Cod who knows nothing
about Titan and cares nothing about II
tian-and that's another fact about I'll
tan" Thackeray. slipping claret at the
moment, paused and bowed courteously to
Carlyle, as he remarked: Pardon me.
that is not fact about Titan. But il is
q fact-and lamentable one-about
Thomas CarlYle"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
DO YOU KNOW

that in making the trip to Omaha ex-
position you are on the road ONLY
CNE NIGHT if you use the Overland
Limited" of the Union Pacific? Just
the thing for nervous people who prefer
to travel by daylight; and for Men
of Affairs" to whom the saving of =
business day is an important consider
alton, we have the Fast Mall ONLY
ONE DAY on the road to Omaha. APP
probation of this Incompatible time,
together with dining car service ana
superior equipment, is best shown by
the popular demand for tickets via the
Union Pacific at the. "Old Stand" POI
Main street
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Our neighbor denies that ANY one
connected with the Tribune ever, by
word or intimation, asked aught' of
any official, past or present, in the city
council, state or territory, that any
citizen might not, with perfect pro-
priety, have asked The Tribune's
ideas of propriety are its own. And
still perhaps, there is no way to prove
shat Pratt. Clark, Thomas. Devine,
Stanton, or any of those city, county
and state officials were in any way tied
up with our morning contemporary.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

once fertile and prosperous have be-
come a litter of bleaching bones. with
only birds of prey to dwell in the de-
serted tents With security from the
Dervishes and orderly administration.
there is every sign OF recovery in Dom
COLA and in Berber. Villages are spring.
ing up again, and British supremacy is
asserted to be disputed no more.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

some of the officers. He frankly admitted
that he had bagged the pork. but solemn
" asserted that it was in obedience TO or
ders.
what do you mean?" demanded the
superior officer.
Il ordered that pig to halt. sir, but he
kept right on | gave him another chance
by commanding him TO advance and to
give the eountersign. but he disregarded
this, and then I realized that l must
shoot"
The dignity of the court could not be
maintained. and the soldier paid tie pen
atty by hunting up the owner and paying
him for the pig.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
Senator Peffer,s Potatoes.

Senator PETER is fond of relating the
story of how he once duped the managers
of a Kansas county fair. "On examina-
ton of the sweet potatoes exhibited" ne
says. Il saw that the size of the speci-
mems was nothing to brag of, and l sent
out to a grocery store and purchased a
out for home use. carried the rest to the
fair grounds, entered them in my own
name, and drew the premium for the best
specimen of sweet potatoes grown in VII
son county,"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
TALES OF THE DAY.
Kissing the Black Girls.

One of the northern regiments, return
ing from a southern camp, was detained
at Charlottesville. Va, for little while.
and hundreds of black gals gathered
around the train. says the New York
Press; Such OF the soldiers as were well
enough got out q the cars and made { ha 80
after the wenches, who CATERED ike drst,
with yells and screams. The boys caught
and kissed them right and left, on cheek
and chin. mouth. nose and eyes. 1t mat
tered not in the scuffle. Some captives
were led up 10 the car windows to be
kissed by the sick and wounded. There
never was such a kissing of ''cullud Ia
dies and all of the Virginia papers are
mad. The girls are now above work.
Their whole conversation is of their
white gemmen friends f um de NaWth."
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
George Grossmith's English.

I The amusement which English papers
found in George Remnants remark that
an English attache in Cuba had only a
slight English accent" recalls a story
which George Grossmith, the English mu-
steal humorist. likes to tell at his own ex-
pense. a New York gentleman" he
say: was once chatting me about my
pronunciation of certain words, and ! was
very much amused at it. So l said to him:
It's our language, you know. We invent
ed il before you were discovered He was
O. bit abashed at first The nhe said:
That's so. Well think it's about time
you learned to speak it
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

A goldbug organ insinuates that
Judge Rolapp is not a silver man. The
judge is not so old that he clings to
any party for the sake of past mem
cries and deep-rooted prejudices; he is
not so partisan that he would remain
in an organization that declared for
gold; he is just a plain, unassuming
friend of free coinage, standing on a
bimetallic platform and working in a
silver party.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
An Explanation.

The reason for the great popularity
of Hoods Sarsaparilla lies in the fact
that this medicine positively cures. 1t
is Americas Greatest Medicine, and
the American people have an abiding
confidence in its merits. They buy
and take it for simple as well as seri-
Gus ailments, confident that it will do
them good.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

From the Republican camp our morn
ing contemporary shouts through Ar
thur Browns megaphone: We tell
them they are but amateurs in the (sil-
ver) business" Are all the profession
ais in the goIdbug party?
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

When our morning contemporary was
interested in the defeat Of the Nevada
silver party it claims that The Herald
was. supporting the Democratic ticket.
Certainly. The silver issue was not then
a bone of contention between the par
ties in Utah. It was, however, between
those parties in Nevada, and is between
the parties in the nation today.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

They say that places on the Republi-
can ticket in Grand county are begging
this year; they are industriOusly seek
ing the man" who invariably fees upon
their approach Il legislative candidacy
having cornered two citizens, they
shook dice the other day to see which
should escape.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

A -partisan-fusion-B Bryan cKin-
ley organ declares The Herald pro-
ceeds every morning to insult all who
were interested in that effort to secure
q better government for the city"
Now that means Pratt and a Pratt
government for the city.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Whenever an apostate Catholic raises
the A. 2. A. issue, and tries TO resur-
rect buried difference, rest assured
there is more Of political demagogy
than religious solicitude in it.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

BY making AIger an issue, Senator
Hanna hopes to turn the public eye
away from those bribery charges
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Aguinaldo threatens to sue for libel
the newspaper which refers to him as
Algernaldo.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Hoods Pills cure all liver ills. Mailed
for 25c. by c. 1. Hood & Co, Lowell,
Mass.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
baltimore American: Yesterday o,

| Baltimore American: Yesterday our
| Washington correspondent telegraphed
| as follows: THE most optimistic mem
| Der of the Republican congressional COM
mittee would not today venture the pre-
! diction that the next house VIII show an
increased Republican majority. On the
contrary, it will take good. hard fighting
| to retain the majority of % lover ALL
which is now the Republican bulwark
against free silver legislation. The reve-
| lations of Secretary Ayers mismanage-
ment have excited indignation and con-
tempt, and President McKinley's appar-
ent determination to shield Mr.. Alger
has caused no little concern to local man
ayers Of congressional campaigns"
Boston Herald: General Zurlinden, the
military governor of Paris, has succeed
ed General Cavaignac as minister of war
( and 1t is reasonable TO suppose that he
will ask for time to look into the evil
dence on which Nine. Dreyfus' petition
is based The general is officially familiar
with the earlier aspects of the case for
he held the war portfolio in the short
lived Ribot cabinet of 1895, and 1t was
during his tenure of office that q bill
growing out of the Dreyfus scandal was
introduced and passed. This measure
fixed the. penalty of death for the crime
of revealing plans or documents or giving
information in relation to the defenses
of the country.
Philadelphia Bulletin: The death of
MILFORD Woodruff. president of the Nor
mon church, recalls attention to the
utter collapse of Mormonism as a politi-
cal factor. II is not many years since
the suppression Of polygamy and the
restriction Of the growing power of the
Mormon organization was one of the
prominent questions of the day. The en-
forcement of the Edmunds law and the
admission of Utah as state have chang
ed all this completely. While the elder
Mormons still cling tenaciously to the
tenets of their faith. the community
which Brigham Young and his followers
founded in the midst of the western des-
ert has been transformed by the domfna-
ton of progressive Americanism, and the
Mormon problem. which was the theme
of so much discussion and the cause of
such perplexity. has ceased to exist
Probably not one American citizen in 80
could have told a week ago who was the
head of the Mormon church. and the
choice OF Woodruff's successor is a mat
ter which viii interest nobody outside of
the Mormons themselves.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
Phiiadelnhia Pnhlic

Philadelphia Public Ledger: Count
Esterhazy says he cannot prove that he
did not write the famous Dreyfus Dor
I dereau." but claims that it is not neces-
sary, las Dreyfus was judged by the
law to have written it," Nevertheless,
Esterhazy says he is ruined in every
way but there Is no proof of that,
either.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
New York commercial Advertiser: Gen.

New York Commercial Advertiser: Cen
eral Zurlindens appointment as min
lister of war argues well for a revision of
the Dreyfus case 1t matters little
whether any of those who favor revision
believe in Dreyfus' guilt or not; that is not
the point which concerns either France
or the world. What everybody is wait
ing for is a return to honest judicial pro-
cedure.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
WIT AND HUMoR.

Brooklyn Life: my whole family was
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15
COMMENTS OF THE PRESS.

Pittsburg Dispatch: While the middle
of-the-road Popuiists were probably
guided by the old proyerb that lit is the
early bird that catches the worm. they
would have been wise 10 first consider
who is to be the bird and who the worm
in this case.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Puck: We have all heard of the man
who bit off more than he could chew.
But there was another man. He at
intellect would permit. And. of the two,
he presented by far the most lamentable
spectacle.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Judge: Uncle Reuben-Silas don't talk
so much bout politics as he used to- A
couple of years ago he was the best
posted Teller on national finances 1 ever
saw.
Uncle Joshua-He was; but since then
he's raised some rattlin' good crops.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Chicago Tribune: Mrs. Chugwater-
Josiah. l see a good deal in the papers
about internal machines. What is an
Internal machine?''
Mr.. Chugwater-WeH, sometimes 1
think it's a lawn mower, and sometimes
think it's piano."
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Indianapolis Journal: Though soldiers
are paid by the month"; said the Cheer
full Idiot, and paused
We'll, what? asked the transient
boarder.
THE commission will be paid for peace
work.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

in the country month. and the house
was closed up; yet the gas bin was as
large as ever"
of course Gas meters never take a
vacation.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1898-09-15

Chicago News: Il say, I've an offer
to go to work for a West End wholesale
house What would you do if you were
in my shoes2''
After a careful inspection: II think 1
would black en-
The times., 1898-12-23
General wheeler's Position.

II appears, according to a statement
published in the New York Journal of yes
terday, that General Wheeler has an
nounced his determination to retain his
seat in the present Congress, as well as
his commission as major general. 1t is
also stated that he ascribes the objec-
tions made by "a few Democrats to this
course to his refusal to follow the lead
ership of Mr.. Bailey last Summer on the
question of expansion
The Democrats who have any such rea-
son for holding that General Wheeler
ought either to retire from Congress or the
army are very few indeed, if they exist
at all outside of one or two individuals.
Certainly no motive of the kind could be
laid at the door of The Times.
We think that 1t was all right
for General Wheeler, as a member
of Congress, to volunteer to fight
in his country's cause, and that it
was patriotic and noble in him to
do so. II has nothing to do with the
question at issue that his record in the
Spanish war is superb, and that he is
y >
that he may ask at the hands of the
nation. Returning from Cuba with the
laurels of Ell Caney and San Juan fresh
upon him, it was unquestionably his right
to accept an election TO the F.sfy-sixth
Congress, which will not come into exist
ence until the fourth of March next. In
our opinion, 1t was not right for him TO
retain his commission and his seat in the
Fifty-fifth Congress at the same time.
1t would probably make any newspaper
reader in Washington laugh TO be told
that the animus of The Times in saying
this was resentment because General
Wheeler refused to follow the leadership
of Mr.. Bailey last Summer on the question
of expansion" The general could hardly
be a more advanced or determined expan-
sionist than this journal is If he tried:
nor could he possibly entertain any less