Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1898-08-23
COULD BE HAPPY YET
WHILE making trip through the
wv Y,,o,,pfoine re oue{ar,, Eao+,,ol,p
The Old MountaIneer Had Had a
Troublesome Time.

WHILE making trip through the
Wv mountains of eastern Kentucky
last summer stopped one day under
the inviting shade of thick-headed
beech to rest and cool my horse.
Soon heard soft, measured tramp,
tramp in the thick dust OF the road,
and, looking up, beheld an old man
approaching my shade, his chin against
his breast.
He came up, said: "Howdy, stran-
ger" took seat close by my side and
emitted a long, deep sigh.
He took out his jackknife and nerv-
ously whitfield his right shoe sole a
few seconds, then closed the knife
again, rammed it back in his pocket
and looked around at me with an ex-
preston Of desperate agony.
Mister" he began. after signing
pause, I'm in heap O. trouble this
ere day. Hits the tip-top of noun
tin Of trouble that's bin a-pilin' up
fer the last Is years. I'm jist out
huntin' fer some one to help me let
loose of 1T little. I'm a-gittin' white
all mixed up in the black of my hair,
an can't stand up under things as
could when there was more sap in
my timber. I want you to advise me
what to do-you are pirty peart-
lookin' little bow-legged Teller"
We'll, tell me your trouble, and I'll
put in a hand If can help you any
I said, smiling.
wall, about Is years ago me an
Tom Snodgrass, near neighbor of
mine, went away off down ter Gin
cinnati to sell lot Of fox an coon
skins.
wall, we wanted to have err little
time arter we sold our skins, an so
we got to maxim hog-troughs outen
our stomachs by pourin a lot of stump
water-lookin' stuff In EN- called lego
beer. Not bein' use ter anything wuss
than moonshine whisky we soon got
SO ediotically drunk that we couldn't
tell our own names.
WALL, when the sunlight o. sense
begin to rise on our intellecks ag'in
I found every cent Of my coon-skin
money was gone. was busted. So
I seq to Tom: Tom seq I, I'll have
ter borry leetle speck o. your money
ter git deck passage back on boat
home
tom hesertated leetle while, then
sed: Bill, amt no Wall street my
SET, but, by guml I'm man, Bill
a man clear through from rhyme to
rhyne-an' I'll be cnssed ef I don't let
you have 80 cents. Lots O. fellers, We
know, wouldn't do 1t, Bill. When a
mans down lots o. fellers tries to keep
his face In the clay. but 1t amt Tom
snodgrass- time. Here's the
stuff, by gully!'
II took the money as bat takes
fly, an sed, seq i: Tom. this thing
don't stop here. You are pllin' me
outin a mighty tight place, ,an' I'll
remember the favor while there's oil
In my lamp. No difference what you
want outin me hereafter, all yo've got
to do is to holler fer 1! an We git It,
"Wall, about three months arter we
got back Tom comes to me just as
the sun was squattin' down behind
hill an sez: Bill, that ar gal o. yourn
-Sarilda Jane-she's about the incest
piece O. femernine furniture in these
ere hills, an I've decided want to
add her to the attrackshuns O. my
brand-new log house
at can't do 1t, Tom sed, the
fack is, the gal is about to hook up
an make team with John Stacey.
They are to trot off together next
week
"I can't hep that, Bill he said,
lookin' at me with an eye full of tears,
I got my heart sot on the gal an
can't git 1t off. You must give her to
me at once. | don't want to throw up
nuthin to you, Bill, but you know
what We sed when let ye have that
%, aents.' -r,.Ss