The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1898-10-20

rudely shocked by one feature of
her entertainment at the Kansas
capital. People went up and down
the street singing a song, the chorus
of which goes as follows: ooh. I'm
a lulu, I'm Honolulu gill;
Jefferson City (Mo.) Courier.
A reward has been offered to the
man who can explain why man
looks dismal at prayer meeting and
gay at the theatre and yet be full
Of piety.-St. Peter Herald.
The American may be a-foreigner
by birth, but he is a hero by natu-
ralization. As soon as he lives
under the Stars and Stripes long
enough to appreciate what they
stand for he is ready to protect
them. There is whole lot of brok-
en- English spoken in the lines of
an American regiment, but there
is no break in the line of patriotism.
-Arkansaw Thomas Cat.
The trouble why great many
people have so few friends is that
they consider themselves "the only
reliable and regard all others as
being inferior in every respect to
themselves.-Boys Lantern.
Spain is demanding things in a
way that would seem to indicate
an impression on the part of that
government that it was Sampson
feet that was sunk.-Minneapolis
Times.
"Who commands the Spnish
Armada?" asked a Hot Spanish
teacher in history. "McGinty''
answered the boy who was never
known to study his lesson.-Ar-
kansaw Thomas Cat.
Teddy Roosevelt's friends be-
lieve that he could defeat the Demo
Gratis of New York if they would put
up a dozen candidates against
him. In this they resemble the
man who boosted that he had
whipped a man eighty years old
and that he felt he could have
licked him if he had beena hundred
Toledo Critic.
Col. Roosevelt will be among
the first to test the value ola Span
ish war record as a votegetter,
The sporting element are backing
him to win.-Glenville Progress.
The inventor denies that rubber
is used in the manufacture of arti-
fetal eggs. We must accept this
as evidence that they will not hatch
chicks of the spring breakfast va
riety.-Denver Post.
That deliberate lie in news
paper is as bad, if not worse, as the
common every day lie, but some
newspaper men don't seem to care.
Albert Lea Standard.
That Atkinson teacher who
was dethroned for kissing a fair
lamb of his fold has been forgiven
and received back into the open
arms of his parishioners, but the
lamb is yet regarded as very
black sheep.-Denver Post.
The Chinese minister to the
United States is a wise man; he
has been tossing newspaper bou-
quets at the old Dowager Empress
ever since she regained the reins
of government.-B PLANE Her
aid.
A Boston old maid declared that
if Hobson had been benedict he
would not have dared to kiss Miss
Arnold. She is probably right.
The country would not have toler-
ated a Benedict Arnold affair
Lansing (Mich.) Enterprise.
There are too many parents who
think that to teach their boys to
be good, they should be given a
dime to put in the collection basket
every Sundey, and not to be
allowed a cent to spend during the
week. st. Louis Humorist.
God never made a lazy man.
Money, the devil and a soft brain
make lazy people, and are not very
good workmen, after all. A lazy
man is poor job, even after he is
finished. -Orange( Va. )Observer.
'Stick to it and you'll pull