The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1898-05-28
QUICK WITTED PATSY
HOW HE SAVED THE DAY FOR HIM
SELF AND HIS LAWYER.
ThoughtIessly Signed an Afidavit With .
Name He swore Was Not His Own-But
He Won the Judge and His Point by His
Explanation.

My first case came at Florence, Ala, |
a few months after l was licensed,
writes Attorney B. NJ. Jackson. The
sheriff there, Captain W. 7. White,
now dead, q gallant Confederate soldier
and IL of natures noblemen, met me
on the street and told me there was a
man confined in the county Jail who
wished to see me.
| was then II years old, but would
readily have passed for II. The clients
name was Patrick Donovan, but he was
commonly called Patsy Donovan. Go
ing to the Jail, 1 found a man from 80
to 30 years old, an intelligent, nice
looking, devil may care Irishman.
When l entered, he greeted me with
Good evening, miss" Pretending not
to have heard him address me as miss
and assuming much dignity, l told him
| was the lawyer whom the sheriff had
promised to send him. For answer he
exclaimed, "Well, I'll be DID," and
burst out laughing-laughing uproar-
iously. l was irritated to a degree by
this reception. Il beg pardon, judge,
it's a go. You do look pretty young,
but Tom 1.-THE sheriff. says you are a
daisy Get me out of here, and my
folks whc've got plenty, will pay you
we'll for your trouble "
He told me his story He was a skill
ed mechanic from Keokuk. Ia, and had
been employed By the government in
constructing a lock on the Mussel Shoals
canal, near Florence. He had shot the
physician i'll charge of those works.
This physician was q brother of the
United States engineer in control of the
canal construction, and it was evident
that the prosecution would be bitter
sparlng no pains or expense to secure a
conviction, entailing a long pe%nitentiary
sentence. The doctor and my client
were both men of reckless courage and
overbearing temper, both sometimes
looked Oh the wine when it was red,
and both, / inferred, were striving for
the favor of the same woman. A clash
between them soon came. They had a
savage quarrel at their boarding house
at dinner. The doctor being armed and
my client unarmed, the latter had to
submit to unlimited abuse and would
have been shot but for the interference
of several men who were present. Soon
after nightfall of the same day my
client went to the DOCTORS Office and
sleeping room, about a mile distant and
in a secluded place, and, knocking on
the door, was hidden by the doctor to
come in. Entering, he found the doctor
putting ON a shirt, and thus for the
moment disabled, and, remarking, lyon
had the drop on me this morning, but
I've got it on You now" fired, striking
the doctor in the neck and inficting a
dangerous but not fatal wound.
The case soon came on for trial.
While the defendant version of the
occurrence as he had given it to me was
very different from the one in the fore.
going, yet it was so improbable in itself
and so inconsistent with the attendant
circumstances that it looked as if a SEN
tence of ten years was inevitable if the
case was then tried. To gain a post
ponement an objection was interposed
to the competency of the court on the
ground that he was related by affinity
to the prosecutor. This failed. Next an
earnest effort was made for a continu-
ance. The state fought this aggressive
ly, thus giving warning of what was to
come, and it, too, failed.
In sheer desperation | then whispered
to my client, Your real name is Pat
rick, not Patsy, isn't it," The indict-
? ment named him Patsy Donovan. Then,
moving to quash the indictment for the
misnomer, l wrote out the defendant
affidavit in support. The affidavit stated
; that the defendant S name was Patrick
and that he was commonly known and
, called by this name and not by the
t name of Patsy Donovan. He took the
| affidavit and read, OF seemed to read, it
carefully and, going to the clerks desk,
r swore to it and signed it "Patsy Done
4 van" This, of course, was the way he
usually signed his name, but he never
reflected that to sign it Patsy this time
was to afford the strongest evidence of
the falsity of the affidavit.
Y Arguing the case without looking at
the affidavit, l didn't see how he had
| signed it, but the state attorney had
f noticed the signature and in his reply
called the courts attention to it. This
disclosure raised a storm of laughter
e and jeering i'll the courtroom. l was
V COMPOUNDED and at the end of my re.
sources. Not so was Patsy. Realizing
S his peril, that the slip was his W and
that he alone could retrieve it, he spoke
out, not a whit abashed: II signed il
e Patsy out of pure respect for your honor.
It's not for me to give the lie to your
= honor's court papers. Your honor's
court paper says I'm Patsy, and I'll sign
-, it Patsy until your honor gives me leave
to write my own true name"
The court sustained the motion from
pure admiration for Patsy. We now
had time to look about us. A few
months later the case was tried, the
s jury failing to agree. The bail bond,
which had been fixed at a high figure
was then reduced to a reasonable sum
He gave the bond, saying he had "lost
by a nose," but he never returned tt
stand another trial, although his bonds
men were promptly reimbursed, and thu
writer was generously remembered, re
t ceiving, as | now remember, $500.
have often been curious to know VIVA
became Of the game, rollicking, imper
turbable Patsy.-Memphis Commercial
Appeal.
The Essentials.
"Do you want a shirt that opens il
the front or one that opens in the back"