The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1898-09-15
HITS AND STRIKES,

A st. Louis man is charged with i'm
personating an officer because he went
to the side-door of a saloon, gave three
raps and got drink.
*
A Philadelphia woman was killed the
other day by jumping off car back
ward. Out in Denver such things new
er happen. The women out there are so
forward since they were emancipated.
~
Since Gen. Alger has determined to
"stand on his record" the tight rope
performance of Blondin across the Nj
agara is threatened with total eclipse.
A Chicago lady who caught her hus-
band teaching another lady to ride BIZ
cycle Immediately informed him that
'the stuff was off,, petitioned for di-
vorce on the ground of undue famil-
iarity' and got it.
The silver party in Colorado should
change its name to the Galena party
because silver and lead seem to 90 to-
gether out there.
~
If Hobson succeeds in raising the
Colon g. it will be an astonisher (D.
2. S. 1t is necessary to furnish dia-
grams like that with our joshes because
of the number of inquiries which are
made in regard to the point (.)
TX
Prof. Harry Thurston Peck claims to
be able to judge mans mental and
moral traits by the kind of perfume he
uses. l wish he would take a trip
with me around the galleries about the
time when the boys take their shoes
off. l would introduce him to some
brands of Jockey Club and Ylang.
Wang he has not met before.
#**
Minneapolis Man-Have you seen
the MISREPRESENTATION?
st. Paul Man-NO. Er-did you lose
one?
Xxx
The man who gives checks which
come back marked n. F. is not de-
tered by the necessity of affixing rev.
enue stamp to them.
*
The G. A. r. veterans did not endear
themselves to the American public by
cheering Alger and kissing Gov. Pin
gree. If they continue to cheer every
one who is veteran and hiss every
one who is not, their influence Will
soon be confined to their own ranks.
*
What an awful lot of weather we
are having, to be sure. The mean tenn
perature is extreme in it's meanness.
***
There is a Cholly boy in here He
stopped me the other night and said:
"Do you know, I'm weakly afwaid me
twousahs will be all out of style don't
chernaw, before 1 get out" That is
really case for the Board of Pardons.
~
The Queen of England is said to be
ambidextrous but then her son is some
what ambisinisterous, so that makes
things even in the family.
Xxx
The store of a St. Louis firm has
been burglarized twelve times in seven
years, and that city proudly lays claim
to the worlds record in this matter.
*~x
1t may, be true that He'll IS paved
with good intentions, but if so, there
is no necessity for any good roads"
agitation there.
*
Our best printer is scanning the
"Male Help Wanted" columns in the
papers since the last Board meeting.
Xxx
A gentleman in New York has writ
ten book on "How to Act Like the
Four Hundred" Some of the boys
will probably argue that "acting like
sixty" has gotten them into sufficient
trouble.
*
It is said the National Undertakers'
Association have adopted as their mot
to the legend, "You kick the bucket;
we do the rest"
xx
One feature of the State Fair just
closed has been complete failure.
The owners of the red lemonade priv.
ileges failed to connect.
Y X
The Democrats who announced their
iptontion tO snnnOrt the administration