The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1898-02-10
Stories Told OF
Famous Men

The story is told of the English actor,
Penley, the creator Of "Charley's
Aunt" that on one occasion he was
going north and barely caught the train
at Euston. He jumped into a carriage
where were some young fellows, and
the only available seats were filed up
with bags and gun-cases, and, as no
one offered to move them out of the
way, he stood up and held on the hat
rack
This went on for an hour or so, when
one of the fellows shifted some of the
things and asked him if he wouldn't
like to sit down.
"Oh, don't trouble" said Mr.. Pen
ley, with twinkle in his eye, I'm
only going to Scotland!"-San Fran
cisco Argunaut.
When the late Neal Dow was a
young man he was chief of the volun-
teer fire department of Portland, Me.
His activity in temperance reform
made him unpopular with the liquor
sellers, and they tried to get him re-
moved
At hearing on the matter one wit
ness testified that Mr. Dow was arbi-
trary and reckless of the lives of the
men. BY way If illustration, he said
that he was ordered by the chief to
take the pipe which he was holding
into a place where he refused to co.
telling the chief that no man could live
there.
on cross-eXamination he was asked:
'What did Mr.. Dow do them"
"Snatched the pipe from my hands
and told me to clear OUT
What else?"
He took it into the fire himself"
At that point the case against the
chief broke down.-Youth's Companion.
O.
AT one Of the recent general elections
in England the Earl of Carlisle Q be-
lieve) was a candidate. The earl is eX-
ceedingly youthful in appearance, and
during one of his speeches he was in
terrupted with the question, Does your
mother know you're out?" Quick as
lightning the earl replied, "Yes; and
tomorrow she'll know I'm in" An
other political speaker who was stig-
matized by an irate questioner as not
having the manners of a pig, had the
presence of mind to retort: "Sir, 1 am
sorry to see you have" On a similar
occasion Sheridan was informed by
one of the questioners that the answers
given by him were so unsatisfactory
that he (the questioner) could not give
him his countenance at the election.
whereupon the orator replied: Sir,
am very glad, for an ugler countenance
never did see."
Turning from politics to literature,
we have the famous encounter of Sir
Walter Scott and Robertson, one of the
Scots judges. Between these two there
was a notorious feud. One day in
passing Robertson, Scott remarked TO
a friend, There goes Peter of the
paunch Robertson was equal to the
occasion with, And there goes Peyeril
of the Peak!" SCOTS forehead, of
course, was very pointed, while the ne
culiarity of Lord Robertson's figure
may be easily guessed from the story.
What is 1t that constitutes a success
full repartee? undoubtedly one of the
main elements is the rapldity of pro-
duction. OF course all quick replies or
remarks are not repartees, but the fol-
lowing borders so closely on the genu-
inc repartee that there is no reason
why it should not find a place in the
list: There is true wit in the reply of
the Irishman to the gentleman who
asked him why his horse was so white
III ldNS' SOIT. ana your
head had been in a hotter all day long
your face would be white too" As the
question was put as a test of an ordi-
Eary Irishman's readiness, the ques-
tioner ought to have been satisfied with
the result.-Evening Post.
O.
General Grant had as much to do
with Longstreet's becoming a Republi-
can as anyone else. They had been
schoolmates at West Point, had been
graduated the same year and received
their commissions at the same time.
They fought among the cactus bushes
of Mexico and had drunk mescal from
the same jug thousand times. 1t
was at Jefferson barracks, near st.
Louis, that Longstreet introduced his
cousin, Miss Julia Dent, to Grant, and
1t was Longstreet himself who told
the young lady of the worth of his