Santa Fe new Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1898-1951, 1898-07-07
THE KLONDIKE BEAR.
MARVELLOUS ADVENTURE OF THE
BLOATED ARlSTOCRAT.

Bruin Almost as Much In Evidence as
Gold In the Frigid CIime-Story of q
Long Hunt Wherein Patience and Fer
severance Are Finally INDICATED.
"No," says the bloated aristocrat reflect
lively, II can't say as l did hev any adven-
lures in the Klondike-leastways what !
would call adventures. Course l can't
deny that l hev been in some queer sorapes
thet We might call adventures, but to my
experienced mind they are nothin-abso.
lutely nothin."
"No, no." shouts the little band in the
corner grocery, mot at all! They were
real adventures, all we want you to tell us
some of them"
Thus earnestly exhorted, the bloated
| shifts his position OH the baking powder
box and tells the following thrilling yarn:
"It was in May, a few days after first
arove in the Klondike, tibet me an my
mate determined to 90 out an hev a bar
hunt. Bars, ye know, are mos ez plen-
tiful up thar ez gold, an thet's needless. y
Here he braces himself and looks at his
pointed shoes with evident self content
ment.
"Waal, we started ont, gun an knives
in our hands an lots of ammunition in
our bags. We walked about 40 mile,
ppos fore we struck a bar, fer, like
gold, thar Is sometimes constable
stretches where they're wantin. This one
we found under a tree, perfeckly motion
less. Gosh, but he wuz a whopper! Mos
16 feet, l guessed, ez soon ez I saw him.
Bill, my mate, didn't think he wuz &C
long, but / WIZ right.
''Thar no sot, never movin a hair, ez me
an my pardner separated an crept ez sly
o. we could up to the beast. guess Bill
got thar first, fer pretty soon 'Bang!' went
his gun.
"Waal, sirs, / wuz mos tetotally s'prised.
knew he wuz a bad shot, but l did think
he'd come near enough to Mt least brighten
the bar. But he never budged. Then
heard Bills gun go off again. No effect
ON Mr.. Bar.
"tLet him shoot SEE l. 'S'long's HI
don't desturb the annermile, I've no OF
jeotions,'
"And shoot he did. Why, sirs, l s'pose
he shot 80 bullets into tibet thar bar an
never a one hit. He knew, l s'pose, tibet
Bill couldn't even strike a rich lode, SO hi
Jest sot thar to tantalize him.
"Purty soon l heard Bill a-yellin:
"'Sam, We darn fool, why don't "
shoot the contrary c~ritter?'
"'Jest a-goin to- SEE l, with an in
diff 'rent tone of voice, for I wuz pretty
sure l could bring him down. PITY ye'rs
80 narvous, Bill!
"Iheard him mutter, Tell with nervous
ness or somethin, IN then ! took aim,
Jest a careless sort of aim, fur I wanted to
hev some fun with the beast. But SURF
ez my names Sam Williams, boys, the1
thar critter never moved.
"'Ill do er die, SEE I, an I spit on my
hands, rested the rife on the tree an fired
l hit him fairly in the heart IN had thu
satisfaction Of seein him stir. Thet WI
all, though, an l determined to investi
gate an CONSISTENTLY run up to him. II
be tetotally consumed, boys, II tibet b'a
wuzn't froze stiffer'n a nicyclel Togethe
with the warm sun an u bullets-fu
Bill he'd hit him onoe-we he'd arouse
him a little, hut by the eighth star in til
Little Dogs tail it took us three days t
thaw him out SOS to give the fatal thrust.
As he utters this grandiloquent phras
he looks up just In time to see the last oc
cupant Of the room passing out the door
while from without comes peal after pea
Of immoderate laughter. Toronto Satui
day Night.