davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

A Frenchman politely passed tooth
picks TO a Turk at a banquet in Paris,
who declined, saying: NO thank you.
! have already eaten two Of the ac-
cursed things, and | want nc more!'
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01
For Prospective KIonhikers.

Send a 2 cent postage stamp TO ". b.
McNider, general passenger agent Sioux
City and Northern railroad, Sioux City.
for the best descriptive folder of Alaska
ever issued. Shows all routes To all the
Alaskan gold fields. gives fun information
how to get there, what outfit Is necessary,
cost. mining laws, etc. A large detail maj
of Alaska and a special map showing the
route from Skaguay down the Yukon &c
Dawson, Circle City and Fort Yukon.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01
ORANGE AND LEMON CROP INJURED
The Crop of Southern California In.
jured by u Succession or
Cold DAYS.

Los Angeles, CAL, Dec. 23.-The
orange and lemon crops of southern
California have been injured by frost
Turing a succession of cold days. The
fact that oranges do not show the ef'
feet of frost from two weeks to a
month after the cold weather, renders
the extent of the damage, even to the
growers of the fruit, very uncertain.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

The good people that think Il is wick
"a to let their children believe in a Santa
Claus are probably the same ones that
tell them IL they eat the crus,s they will
make their hair curl.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01
In

Puck: THE British ambassador" said
Tewhk Pasha, wants TO know IL we arc
ready TO evacuate the Grecian proyin-
Ies"
Not quite replied the sultan: but
you might tell him that we'd be willing to
exchange them for the Klondike."
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

a New York state farmer has mar
ried a ballet girl. 1t is not announced
whether the farmer will go on the
stage or the ballet girl into the dairy
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01
wor.hv of COMMUNICATION.

washington Evening star: "Neves
mind" said the legitimate actors friend,
.posterity win doubtless recognise you.
Yes" was the reply. but you forget
thu so far as I am concerned. posterity
Is made up exclusively Of dead heads"
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

Mrs. william Thaw. jr., has built in
Pittsburg. Pa, and presented to the
Civic club a bath house whore the poor
Of the city can obtain baths by the pay
ment,Of , cents each.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

EFT Q Permanently Cured. No fits or nervousness after
VI y FIRST days uS uf Or. Kiinc's Great Nerve Re.
storer, Send for FREE AZ 90 trial bottle and treatise.
bR- X, u. KLINE, Ltd. g1 Arch Street, Philadelphia, Pa
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

You very seldom see u man who can
b- a Christian and take a porous plas-
ter OF his chest at the same time.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

Onicer-The mans back is broken.
and hs can make no statement Is 10 the
circumstances of the Assault. Magis-
trats-It looks very much like justifia-
BILE tackling. but we viii hold the pris
oner on the charge Of Interference In
the tlrst degree, pendiag further invss'
tgatioR
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

A Kentucky a has married the
granddaughter of the girl who refused
him.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

PisO's cure for Consumption has been q
God.scnd 20 William b. Mcclellan.
Chester. Florida. September l.. 1895.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

COmplerionAl defects are srddicsted, not hidden. b.
Gleuns Sulphur soap.
HIS r air and Whisker / ye, black or brown. SOC
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

For years the English have been So
busy ruling the waves that they have
never learned how L put out a fire.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01
ONE ENJOYS

Both the method and results when
Syrup of Figs is taken; it is pleasant
and refreshing to the taste, and acts
gently yet promptly on the Kidneys,
Liver and Bowels, cleanses the sys.
tenn effectually, dispels colds, head.
aches and fevers and cures habitual
constipation. Syrup of Figs is the
only remedy of its kind ever pro.
duced, pleasing to the taste and ac-
ceptable to the stomach, prompt in
its action and truly beneficial in its
effects. prepared only from the most
healthyand agreeable substances, its
many excellent qualities commend it
to all and have made it the most
popular remedy known.
Syrup of Figs is for sale in 30
cent bottles by all leading drug.
gists. Any reliable druggist who
may not have it on hand will pro-
cure it promptly for any one who
wishes to try It. Donot accepts any
substitute.
CALIFORNIA N SxRUP CO.
san FRANCISCO. car.
LOUISVILLE, ~. Mw y0Rks NJ
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

To CURE a COLD IN ONE DAY..
Take Laxative Bromo QulniDe Tablets All Druggists
refund The money " u fails n cure CSC
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

Houston. Tex. has a lawyer named
Crank. And there are others.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

IL is reported that the Kaffirs have beer
taught by the Chinese to become opium
enters.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

His name is Williams. 1t was as conductor on the Denver cable
line that l knew him. lie was always complaining of some trouble or
other with his stomach and bowels. He seemed to be either bilious or
constipated ali the time. In describing his condition he used the
expression " out of whack" l remember it particularly because l had
never heard it before but have often heard it since. Finally somebody
recommended him to use Ripans Tabnles and he told me that never in
his life did anything do him so much good. Said he felt like a new
man. He told me that his wife used them too; but what she took
them for I don't remember
Anew .k p~Mse asaM9sT ma sIAs%rn s IAsssc %%TSssG wsaS%E sss n. @. S.
ILL., Snr S% s sssSss 9s@SH@SM s aST-% S%S sEMaa.s nSaa.S WI b sS tor %ss -A
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

Judge: I'm going 10 marry Mr. Hinck-
ly."
What, that awful bore2'
Yes: but you see. my dear, he il make
my life seem so long.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01

Mrs. winsiew's soo1HtSo SruUr Ter eeildrss
tee thing. s0ftens the gums, reduces innarnmaAon'
aIlays pain, cures wind collie. 2e . bottle.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01
NEVER ENDORSE ANY MORE.
DIR. Dopev Has Forty Thousand or More
Reasons why.

had both money and friend.
lent my credit to my friend.
' lost my money and my friend
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1898-01-01
he. herself, for, after all, Deb was her

Mr.. Craig's intention OF j%onrneying TO
Glasg ow was postponed because he caught
q very severe cold, and was obliged to keep
his bed. This was a very trying time to
the household, as the old man thought ne
was going to die, and demanded endless
attention. 4, was therefore in the last
week Of January that, encouraged by a
favorable change Of weather, he set out on
his travels. He only intended TO be away
two clear days, but on the morning Of the
second Mona received O few almost illegi'
BILE lines from him saying that he did not
expect to get away till the foi.owIng Sat
hrday.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
A New COmbusCibIe.

In the island of Barbados large guam
titles of a mineral have been found which
the natives call ''manjak." 1t is of
bright black color and occurs at a very
slight depth, sometimes on the surface,
in beds one to two feet thick. 1t gener-
ally appears under an angle of about
40 degrees and in the immediate vicinity
of rock. 1t is presumed to be solidifed
petroleum, which is often seen there eX-
uding from the earth or floating on the
water. In its composition this mineral
is similar to the pitch of Trinidad, to the
%4ilsonite of Utah and the Canadian Al
berthe but it is of a much better quality
The best varieties Of 'manjak" contained
2 per cent. of water, 1855 per cent Of
volatile organic substances, 26.97 per
cent. of organic solid ones and O.18 per
cent. of mineral parts. Trinidad pitch
contains from u to 80 per cent. of wa
ter and about 3S per cent. of ashes
Hence the manjak mineral is much richer
in natural bitumen. It is used, among
other purposes, for the insulation of cleo
trical conduits, for varnish, bituminous
concrete and for fuel, mixed with peat.
etc. 1t may to some extent supplant
gUttapercha as an insulating medium
Scientific American.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
A Practical Demonstration.

Before the days of chIoroform there
was a quack in San Francisco who adj
vertised tooth drawing without pain. The
patient was placed in a chair and a
wrench given, when he roared violently.
II thought you said there was no pain"
$50 there is not by my process. That is
Cartwright's way. That's the way he
does it. It's very different from mine. .
Another tug, and a still more violent
howl That's the way Dumerge pulls
teeth said the unabashed practitioner.
You don't like it, no doubt. Who
would? Another twist was given and the
patient, as a rule, howled worse than
ever. THAT" the dentist says, sis Park
inson's mode" By this time the tooth
was nearly out. Il will now," he said,
display my own method" whereupon he
triumphantly withdrew the tooth and
held it up for inspection. you observe
that by my truly scientific process there
is really no pain whatever"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

The good order which has prevailed at
the Methodist church of Monongahela,
Pa, since revival services began is
marked. Perhaps this may be on ac-
count of the reputation which had come
to Monongahela ahead of the pastor. 1t
is stated that Rev. Mr.. Johnson once,
while located in a Beaver valley town
somewhat noted for it's tough element,
was w s.; disturbed by some OF them: At one
disturbed by two young men, who audi
bly, scoffed at everything they saw or
heard. Finally the pastor demonstrated
with them on their behavior and asked
them why they attended the meeting.
I'VE came expecting to see miracles per-
formed" impudently replied one of the
rascals. Leaving the desk and walking
quietly down the aisle, the pastor seized
one after the other by the collar, and, as
they disappeared out of the door, re-
marked: eve don't perform miracles
here, but we do cast out devils"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

Egypt has gained an enviable reputa-
ton as a winter home for those VINO sui
fer from diseases of the respiratory or
gans. Every year, as the cold weather
approaches, large numbers flock to the re-
gions bordering the Nile, some on pleas
ure bent, but the majority imbued with
the hope of deriving benefit from the eX-
ceptional climate The ancients were well
aware of the health-giving, medicinal
properties of the climate of Egypt, al
though it is only within recent times that
this fact has been appreciated and I'M
derstOOd at its full value. The Roman
physicians were accustomed to advise
their patients to go to Egypt-by Egypt
meaning Alexandria, as in those days
the interior of the country was almost a
terra ignOta, owing to the difficulties OF
travelling. HerOdOtuS makes mention OF
the Salubrity of the air. and as a teStl-
mony to this points to the healthfulness
Of the Egyptians. Naturally nowadays
most of the visitors to Egypt are English,
although lately many Americans follow
their example: indeed, during what is
known as the Egyptian season, there are
to be found gathered there representa-
tives of nearly all the civilized nations.
In view of this, remarks the Medical
Record. it is matter of great Importance
that thoroughly reliable information
should be obtainable with regard to the
variations of climate in different parts of
the country. Some years ago, before ac-
curate records of the varying degrees of
temperature had been taken and tabulat-
ed it was thought to be immaterial
whether the sufferer lived III the cultiyat-
ed valley Of the Nile or on its western
side in the desert. So long as the destina-
ton was Egypt, the particular location
was regarded as an unimportant detail.
Within recent times, however, the knowl-
edge of the climate of Egypt has been
greatly extended, and now physician is
able to advise his patients as to the dis
trict best adapted to the necessities Of
! their individual cases.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
Had the Wrong Series.

''Now, look here, Thompson re-
marked Brown, sit has been six months
since you borrowed that S. from me-
Seven" corrected Thompson gravely.
"WeI, then, seven mouths" snorted
Brown land you promised to give it
back to me in week. Promised faith
fully, you did, to return me it in seven
DAYS instead of months"
81 know it" answered Thompson, sad
", drawing a memorandum book. from
his pocket. ''That bill was Series E,
No. 672. 500, issue of 1881 I made the
note, and then I spent the money. Since
then I've been trying to recover it.
would do as welI.'
No" responded Thompson, shaking
his head; I'm a man OF my word. When
you gave me the bill / said I will re-
turn this to YOU, and / meant it. Brown,
old man, just as soon as I come across
No. 672,929, Series +, issue Of 1887, I'll
see that you get it, for I am not the one
to go back on my promise. Harper S
Magazine.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
The First New Orleans.

There has been q New Orleans in the
United States navy before the Brazilian
cruiser which is to bear the Crescent city s
mellifuous name. According to the Bos-
ton Journal. it was a wooden line-of-bat-
tleship of "a guns and 28O5 tons-a ship
larger than most of Nelson's-which was
built at Sackett's Harbor, on Lake On
tario, just after the War of 1912. Al
though the treaty of 1918 with Great
Britain forbade the actual launching on
the lakes by either power of war vessels
of such tonnage, the immense hull of the
New Orleans was completed and she lay
on the stocks in significant readiness. She
was there even SO late as the War Of the
Rebellion
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
Shake Into Your Shoes

Aliens Foot-Ease, a powder for the
feet. 1t cures painful, swollen, smart
ing feet and instantly takes the sting
out Of corns and buniOns. It's the great
est comfort discovery of the age. AL
lens Foot Ease makes tight-ftting or
new shoes feel easy. 1t is a certain
cure for sweating, callous and hot,
tired, nervous, aching feet. Try it to-
day. Sold by all druggists and shoe
stores. BY mail for 25c in stamps. Trial
package FREE. Address Allen S. Ohm
sted lie Roy. i. y.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

Emergency lectures are good in their
place. but writer in the New York
Times thinks that some of those who at
tend upon them acquire very exaggerated
ideas of their own consequent fitness to
deal with serious cases.
The other day woman fell in the
street. and broke her arm. She was
taken into a store, and clerks ranged
themselves at the door to keep the crowd
out A gentleman had helped to carry
her. When she had been placed in a
comfortable position, he, after cutting her
sleeve from wrist to shoulder, called for
some cotton, and making some splints of
the thin boards upon which dress goods
are rolled, prepared to set the limb.
At this moment tall woman with eye
glasses, having with difficulty run the
gauntlet of clerks at the door, pressed
eagerly forward.
''You're doing that all wrong; all
wrong" she said.
AS the gentleman did not even turn,
she continued, Come, you must let me
do that You don't know anything about
it: have an emergency certificate"
The gentleman paused in his work. and
without looking up, remarked briefly,
pardon me, madam, but | am a sur
geOn.'
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
Try Grain-O! Try Grain

Ask your Grocer to-day to show you a
packageof GRAIN-O, the new food drink
that takes the place of coffee. The chill
dren may drink it without injury as well
as the adult. All who try it. like it.
GRAlN-O has that rich seal brown of
Mocha or Java, but it is made from pure
grains, and the most delicate stomach re-
ceives it without distress. "a the price of
coffee. 15c. and % cts. per package. Sold
by all rrOcerS
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
What Do the Children Drink?

Don't give them tea or coffee. Have
You tried the new food drink called
GRA1N-O? 1t is delicious and nourish-
ing, and takes the place of coffee. The
more Grain-O you give the children the
more health you distribute through their
systems. Grain-O is made of pure grains,
and when properly prepared tastes like
the choice grades of coffee, but costs
about "A as much. All grocers sell it. 15c.
and 25c
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
A Strange Coincidence.

At Trinity Episcopal church in New
Haven, Conn, ON a recent Sunday the
choir was rehearsing and was singing,
ooh, Had I the Wings of Dove" when
a carrier pigeon flew in at an open WIN
dow. The bird, which was exhausted,
was caught by the sexton, but after be
ing fed appeared to be in fair condition.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
More Money than at Needs.

c;aI NT Year and the high price Of Of con liI
find the British government with more
money in its hands than it needs, and it
has been decided to spend f2,50O,O0O in
buying sites and erecting buildings for
the great public departments, including a
new war Office.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
Great Beneyo1ences.

In large cities Of the United States the
condition Of the poor is constantly being
improved by the benevoiences of wealthy
people. Sanitary reforms are suggested
and carried out with earnestness, but
those produced by Hostetter's Stomach
Bitters in disordered liver, bowels or nerv-
Gus system are very conspicuous.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
An Odd Pet.

A New York correspondent of the Phil
adelphia Times tells of a typewriter in a
downtown office who has made pet of a
mouse. The little creature sits on the
top of the machine and seems to enjoy
the click of it's keys and the clang of the
bell. Its mistress found it one morning
shut up in the machine, and won its
friendship by petting and feeding it.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
STATE OF OHIO, CITY OF TOLEDO, 81.
LUCAS COUNTY %

Frank ]. Cheney makes oath that he is
the senior partner of the firm of Il. j.
Cheney Il Co., doing business in the city Of
Tol-Co, county and state aforesaid. and that
said firm will pay the sum of ONE HUN
DRIED DOLLARS for each and every case
Of Catarrh that cannot be cured by the use
of Halls Catarrh Cure.
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in my
presence, this 9th day Of December, A. D.
1856
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

A Likely Place.-Jane (reading)-"The
wearied sentinel leaned on his gun and
stole a few moments sleep" Little Rob
bie-"I know where he stole it from
Jane-"Where, Robbie?' Robbie-"FrOm
his nap-sack. '-Cleveland Plaindoaler.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
SPINNING WHEEL.
TWO UPON A TANDEM.

TWO UPON A TANDEM
When all the ting wheeling stars
Their cycle-lamps have lit,
And, bending DER their handlebars,
On roads celestial fit,
1 trundle out my tandem fleet,
With Daisy at my side;
We mount, and then our flying feet
ProDel US far and wide.
Along the smooth secluded pike
We take our ev'ning run,
Two souls with but a single bike,
Two hearts that scorch as one.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

1t is stated that the most crowded SPOT
on the earths surface is the "Manedera-
gio," in the city of Valetta, in Milan.
Upon d spot in this place, about two and
a half acres in extent, no fewer than
2574 live. This is at the rate of 636,O0O
per square mile, or 10l7 to an acre
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

The following personal was taken from
a paper published in Northern Wisconsin,
and written by a Canadian Frenchman:
My wife he left my home, she amt AK
me- l will taken notice on every man, any
man she trust hinl-dots loss for you.
Joe Mufrat
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

A demure, Misunderstanding old lady,
aged 60 or whereabouts, was sitting down
at her mending and sewing one after
noon, when a beggar came to the door
She was quite alone in the house, which
was in a lonely situation, but the mans
forlorn, half-starved appearance so ex-
cited her compassion that she invited him
into the kitchen TO have something to
eat. The old lady forthwith proceeded to
the pantry for the food, and when she
came back her gold-r;mmed spectacles
were gone. She turned to the tramp and
said, You've got my 'specs"" But he
fatty denied it. Quietly laying down the
plate, she went to the cupboard, took out
revolver, pointed it at the beggar, and
told him that if he did not put chose
specs" upon the table he might look out
for the consequences. The fellow then
quickly took the missing glasses from his
pocket, and, without a murmur, handed
them to her. Now said the old dame,
calmly, ''eat what | have brought for you
and go. You don't deserve anything, but
you seem hungry enough" The man ate
in haste and departed at express speed.
When, later, the old Iady's son William
appeared, she again took the revolver
from the cupboard and said to him, evil
liam, how do you make this thing go?
What do you start with ?''-Exchange
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally
and acts directly on the blood and mucous
surfaces Of the system. Send for testi-
monials, free.
f. !. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
Sold by Druggists, T5c.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

The tallest shaft or pillar in London
or the neighborhood is the London monu-
ment, which is only POP feet high.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
Coughing Leads TO Consumption.

Kemp's Balsam will stop the cough at
once. Go to your druggist today and get
a sample bottle free. Sold in % and 80
cent bottles. Go at once; delays are dan
GprOuS.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06
Lanes Family Medicine

Moves the bowels each day. In order
to be healthy this is necessary. Acts
gently on the liver and kidneys. Cures
sick headache. Price, % and SOC.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

Piso's Cure for Consumption has been
a family medicine with Us since 1865
J. R. Madison, 2409 42d ave., Chicago,
I'll
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

About 200 tons of refuse are swept off
London streets daily.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

-Eighty-hve per cent. of the people
who are lame are affected on the left
side,
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

-Simla. India, is built on the sides of
q steep hill, and the roof of one house is
often on a level with the foundation of
one in the next tier.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1898-04-06

There is a firm Of wholesale grocers
in JOhnstown, Pa, which rejOices in the
name of Love, Sunshine & Co.