davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The record-union., 1898-01-28
NEWSPAPER WAITS.

Mr.. Callahan-Eucher is not a bad
game, but I'd rather play poker Mr..
Cohen-Vell, eucher is chenerally der
best if you lose undt poker is der best
if you vin.-Puek
Brown-Do you know. that the ma
jority of physicians are comparative
ly poor men? Jones-No, I wasn't aware
of that; but 1 know some of them are
awfully poor doctors.-Chicago News.
Author-What do you think of my
new book? Friend-It certainly con-
tains much food for thought. Author
Do you really think so? Friend-Yes; ;
but it seems to have been wretchedly
cooked.-Chicago Record.
In the Barnyard. Hen - What
are those young bantams fighting
about? Second Hen-Ohi they are dis
putting about the question, Which is the
mother of the chick-the hen that lays
the egg or the incubator?-Puck.
A boy being asked to describe a kit
ten said: "A kitten is remarkable for
rushing like mad at nothing whatever,
and stopping before it gets there" 1t
must have been the same boy who thus
defined scandal: "It is when nobody
amt done nothing, and somebody goes
and tells Tit Bits
A Chilling Comparson.-'Let US try
to remember" said the jovial citizen.
for the sake of holiday festivity, that
Christmas comes but once a year "
Yes" replied the ascetic acquaintance;
and for the same purpose let us try to
forget that the bill collector comes sew
Sure to Succeed.-"She is the most in
nocent young woman I ever saw" re-
marked Willie Washington; II can't get
her TO talk without reserve, no matter
how l try Have you given it up?'
"Oh, no. There is one way that /
haven't tried. I am going to arrange
to have her play whist. Va Washington
Star.
A young colored philosopher was en-
ployed in one of our stores at a salary
of SO 30 per week. He told his employer
one morning that he was going to
leave, having got a better place. "a
better places? echoed his employer;
what wages are you to get?" Three
dollars a week" But that is not so
much as you get here No" said
the boy; but then it's better to do less
and not get so much than to do more
and not get enough. boston Trans
cript
The record-union., 1898-01-28
The GREYHOUND.

AT the end of the reign of Henry vi
the lady prioress" of the Nunnery OF
Sopwell, near st. Albans, was Dame
Juliana Berners, described somewhere
as second Minerva in her studies and
another Diana in her diversions. Let
this be as it may, she wrote, among
other works, Book of Hunting Cbet-
ter known, perhaps, as the 'Boke OF
st. Alban'sD in doggerel verse, and
there is probably no passage in all lit
erature of the dog more hackneyed
than her description of the "Grehoun.
But as no article on the breed can be
considered complete without it" (and
as I have actually something quite new
to say about it). I give the first six
lines out of the twenty:
grayhoun shold be Needed lyke a snake,
And neckeyd like a drake,
Footed like a catte
Tayllyd like ratte,
Syded like tene,
And chynyd like a beme.
Now it is a fact, and a very curious
one, that out of all the people who have
criticised this description, there is not
one, so far as I know, who has under
stood the second line. They nearly all
praise the simile (than which none
could be worse if drake" meant mail
Iard''), while some make bold to suggest
that goose or swan would, perhaps
have been better. But Dame Juliana we
may be sure never suggested that
greyhound should have a roley-poley
neck, the same size all the way down
like a water-fowls When she wrote
drake" she meant dragon. l doubt
indeed, If the word drake for he
duck was known in the fifteenth cen
tury. And it is certain that Shakes
peare a century later never used the
word. To say that a greyhound should
have the neck of a mallard is ludlcrous
To say that it should have the neck OF
a dragon--a familiar beast enough IL
the days of Henry VI, but now unfor-
tunately extinct-is to describe it pre-
cisely. namely. tapering to the throat
and widening gradually to the great
depth at the chest. Whether the sport
ing prioresS really wrote the lines her
self, or was merely quoting current
doggerei, who shall say? But in Wyn-
kyn de Worde's Treatise on Hawking
Hunting, etc. published in l496, very
soon after the DANES work, the pas
sage occurs without any acknowledge
ment of her authorship, and with the
(excellent) alteration in the sixth line
of reading Dream for beam This
looks very much as IL the worthy Wyn-
kyn were quoting from memory, ane
his commission altogether of two lines
goes to confirm the idea.-Good Words
The record-union., 1898-01-28
A MARSHMALLOw ROAST.
The Sport Is Undignitied, but You
Will Have a jolly Time,

| For a genuine jolly time and undig-
nified sport nothing equals or can ap-
proach marshmallow roast The ne
cessities are an open fire. small, pointed
sticks for toasters and marshmallows
The Boston Journal tells the rest.
Marshmallows in boxes are always
fresher and nicer than those bought at
a showcase. In any case they are ex
pensive, a fact which would deter many
in planning roast. But the making
of marshmaIlows is not confined wholly
to the practiced confectioner
l found out one thing in experiment.
ing with recipes which give gum arabic
as an ingredient, and that is that gum
arabic is 81 90 a pound. and that the
majority of marshmallows We're made
from gum tragacanth,an ounce of which
goes as far as four of gum arabic, the
price of the gum tragacanth being half
the price of the gum arabic But the
recipe for marshmallows is this: To
half a pound of gum add a pint of water
and allow it to dissolve Half a pound
of sugar is then added. the whole placed
over a fire and stirred constantly until
the mixture is the consistency of honey,
when the well-beaten whites of four
SStS iiS eiQOS0, N@iAl d lew uIOPS VI
tincture of marshmallow, the whole be-
ing stirred until quite thin and so it
does not adhere to the fingers The
confection is then poured into pans,
busted with powdered starch and cut
into squares when cool. If you are sue
cessful with your candy-and perhaps
you will be obliged to try more than once
10 perfect yourself in its making-yo
can give a roast, with home made
marshmallows, to your friends.
bright fire of pine wood should be
built in a CRATE. When guests arrive
sticks cut from a shngle and sharpened
at one end, as we'll as decorated with a
ribbon, are passed around Then each
person provides himself with marsh
mallow and proceeds to roast it. Held
to the fire. it first puffs up, and then
grows brown. Great fun is had in know
ing just when to remove the marshmai
low cautiously from the toaster to the
mouth. If it grows too hot it drops
unawares into the fire, or mayhap falls
to one side.
But when transferred to the mouth at
exactly the right moment it is delicious
beyond expression, melting away rap
idly and leaving only a desire for an
other one as a remembrance.
Finger bowls must be near at hand,
for the most ardent lover of roast
marshmallows cannot deny their sticki-
ness. A prize may be awarded to the
one who browns a marshmallow the
finest, or perhaps to the one who con-
sumes the most. This viii occasion
some gorging, especially among the
sterner sex. Fruit and fancy drinks
will be acceptable to the sweetened
guests after the fun is over
The record-union., 1898-01-28

than eight pages would be a great boon
to the reading public and would COM
mand the respect and support Of ah
classes CT people who are so busy that
they cannot spare the time to sift the
legitimate news out of the rubbish that
The newspapers print every day."
In the opinion of this paper the sue
cessful metropolitan paper of the future
viii not only be smaller in size than the
present bulky and padded sheets, but
Will give the news of the world in little
more than one-half the space now de-
voted to that purpose. The news VII
be condensed, and what is of still mora
importance, the money now spent in
amplifying trash will be devoted to the
securing of correct information. Such
paper would be a boon to the public
at this time, but of course it will not
come antil the public has sufficiently
shown its disapproyal of the present
yellow methods. 1t is common re-
mark il Fresno among intelligent news
paper readers that they get more news
and more satisfaction out of the
Republican, than they do out of the
San Francisco dailies. In the latter
they have not the time to dig the news
out OF the rubbish heap.
a SOURCE OF WEALTH
Alameda Argus: The tariff law has
done one thing, at least, and that IS 90
give California citrus fruit show.
There * a heavy decline in imports,
and all the California product is in.
ready demand. A New York paper de-
clares the trade is revolutionized. When
the details of trade and tariff are all
permanently settled it promises to show
that Caiifornia's citrus product will be
one of its greatest sources of wealth.
THE DUDLEY INCIDENT.
Fresno Expositor: We are inclined to
sympathize with the Santa Rosa
tPress-Democrat' that the good people
down at Stamford are making a great
ado about nothing over the arrest of
Professor Dudley for counterfeiter by
blauderng Constable. The professor
is entitled to no more consideration
than would be any ordinary day-labor-
er and many good man is arrested al
most every day on equally groundless
suspicious and later turned free. 1t
may be all wrong to arrest men in this
Wayi and if Professor Dudley's arrest
VIII inauce amateur detectives to ex-
ercise greater care it will have served
a good purpose
The record-union., 1898-01-28
A Terrible BIunder,

Hands uni" said the villain with
the low brow and the bulldog jaw.
"All right, I'll put up my hands," re-
piled the man with the tall forehead and
the pale countenance, but you have
evidently made a mistake. / am a
newspaper man."
Here said the footpad, tears Of pity
springing into his eyes, SIS a quarter.
Don't let this ever become known, or
the gang'll put me back in the anna teur
class"-Cleveland Leader
The record-union., 1898-01-28

if they are proved guilty, they will be
duly taken and hanged to death
In the meantime in the name of COM
mon decency, let that advising Con-
stable and that Anticipated Justice be
removed from Office, and let Los Angeles
redeem her name by sending mission
aries into the Gala basas section to bring
the benighted of that region UP to some
thing near the common level of appre-
citation of right and wrong that Ameri-
can citizens are supposed to entertain.
At the same time let Los Angeles
overhaul its records and open its eyes
to the fact that it has no title of record
to most of its road property, and then
proceed TO civilize itself by securing its
property and removing it from the order
Of murder meters.
The record-union., 1898-01-28

Spain Is about to send her biggest
strongest warships to American ports
Good Come on with them. There is
room in plenty and welcome. If the
first ship Is sent as a scare-piece it will
effect nothing. We do not frighten
easily. Oh, no, send on your ships,
Queen Regent, Americans will be
pleased to see them in any American
port at any time We ask no privileges
Of you that we are not ready to grant to
you. You have been ridiculously and
childishly fearful and jealous because
we wanted to anchor an ironclad of our
own at Havana to afford our people pro-
lection when your subjects get into
scrapping matches and break things
that do not belong to them. But we can
afford to endure your jealousy laugh to
scorn your fears and welcome all the
Spanish men-of-war you may wish to
plant in our waters. Let the bronzed
boys come ashore also. Nobody viii
harm them. We have not felt free to let
our blue jackets have shore liberty at
Havana, it's true, because your hot
headed youths are so provokingly pug
nacious; however, We bear no grudges
and your blue jackets can run around
our cities in perfect safety.
The record-union., 1898-01-28
Weather Forecast.

Northern notwithstanding cloudi-
ness Friday. and probably showers along
the coast; northerly, changing to south
erly winds.
The record-union., 1898-01-28
Affairs.

''Have they nominated a man Of af-
fairs?"
Il believe so. There is talk, particu-
larry, of an affair with an actress. -
Detroit Journal.
The record-union., 1898-01-28

The Stockton Mall" an esteemed
contemporary, quick to resent. begins a
leader with these words:
This city of Stockton is dirty-dis-
gracefully. vilely. injuriously and evilly
dirty.
The offense is rank.
1t smells to heaven.
There is filthy mud on all the streets
An unspeakably vile mess of unmen-
tionable compounds compared to which
a Chinatown bum is as a sweet SAVIOR.
Now just suppose a Sacramento paper
had said half as much about Stockton.
what a hot time there would have been
airy.
The record-union., 1898-01-28

The most insufferably silly thing that
is said against the annexation of Ha-
wall is the constantly reiterated state
ment in the sugar press that the islands
must be at once fortified at an expense
of millions. How many millions has
this country ever spent in fortifying
Alaska since ii was annexed?
The record-union., 1898-01-28

The story from Korea that the EN-
peror of that unhappy country has
asked the United States Minister to ap-
peal for him TO the American nation
for protection from influences tending to
provoke revolutions in Korea, is dis
turbing. The rumor seems to be fairly
we'll authenticated. What is more, there
is a good deal of reason why it is true
so far as the danger of revolution is
concerned. But it is not Understandable
the United States. We must wait for
light on that head. We do not appre-
hend should it prove true, that such
an appeal has been made, that the
United States will meddle with the
troubles on that peninsula. Korea Is
doomed, come what may. between
Russia and Japan its independence Is
fading away. 1t is not really capable OF
self government. Its people are, OF all
Orientals, least intelligent, least tract
able, least humane. It's royalty is bar
barism, and its aristocracy is pigged
stupid and cruel bigotry and ignorance
We would have a pretty job Of 1t at
tempting to save such a people from
themselves. Perhaps it would be well
for humanity and civilization if the Jap
anese or the Russians could wholly dom
mate in Korea Of course, the Koreans
have the human right to be left alone, TO
be free from robbery and conquest, TO
be as exclusive as they please and to
continue forever to exist between the
fires of domestic contention. Of course
we ought to protest firmly, if they ask
us. that their human rights should be
respected and that they should not De
robbed and divided among the spoilers
But beyond that, which will amount 10
nothing, the United States cannot go.
The record-union., 1898-01-28
VOICE OF THE PRESS.
FROM EDITORIAL
EXPRESSION.
State and Coast Opinions on SUBJ
jects of Living News
Interest.

Tacoma Ledger: Confidence was what
was wanted, said Mr.. Mckinley, and
confidence being restored, the business
conditions are improved. A report from
Sioux City illustrates this to a degree.
Business has increased in that city, but
not to such an extent as have the bank
clearings. This is explained by the fact
that during the season of distrust the
people did not do business through the
banks to such an extent as now. Conf
dence is restored and the banks are
being used, to the great convenience Of
business men
The record-union., 1898-01-28

Referring to the Mayors denunclatlon
Of the gift by the city Of a site for a
new free library, the New York Post
says that the Mayor simply represents
the men who chose him, and these are,
as rule, representative Of the class
| that cares no more for art, literature,
public education, the elevation of the
masses, and the betterment of the race,
than did Alarac and his horde when
pouring into Rome. In both cases the
party most to the fore was after "the
stuff" It is in keeping with Mayor
Van Wyclss denunciation Of the free
| library site, that Croker should about
the same time denounce the Board Of
Education of New York City, and bring
about his ears such storm Of public
| Indignation as made even the champion
| boss vince At the same moment the
| Brooklyn Democratic City Club was
meeting in it's halls and denouncing
| Croker and Tammany with such an or
ator as Thomas G. Sherman on the ros-
| trum, a Democrat whose Democracy
/
clined to concur in the judgment of the
Post" that Tammany is not a party,
though it goes through the motions Of
one, but is an organization out for
dough-" nothing more nor less. 1t
has men of brains In it in plenty to be
sure, men devotedly attached to their
! country too, but these neither control
nor suggest management of the organ
/ ization. When Tammany sets up
through Van Wyck to sneer at free Ii
braries, through Croker to denounce
Boards Of Education, and through Gra-
dy to abuse and sniff at the Chamber
of Commerce Of the greatest Of Amer
lean cities, the real purpose and the
grossness Of Tammany control appears.
The record-union., 1898-01-28
THE SADDLE ROCK
RESTAURANT AND OYSTER HOUSE

FIRST-CLASS HOUSE IN EVERY RE-
spect Ladies dining-room separate
Open day and night. BUCkMAN & CAR
RAGHER, Proprietors. No. 1919 Second
street, between j and K, Sacramento.
The record-union., 1898-01-28
NEW STATES

Los Angeles Express: It is all right,
perhaps. to deny the three Territories
that are left the Statehood they are
coveting, but is not Congress a little in
consistent, unwise, or something else
out of the way, TO refuse admission to
New Mexico, Arizona and Oklahoma,
while at the same time 1t proposes to
annex and admit far-off Hawaii?
The record-union., 1898-01-28

MAISON FAURE.
RESTAURANT DE FRANCE. 427 X
street (formerly near Golden Eagle Ho-
teD Family Orders. Banquets and We'd
ding Parties speciality. ss1ss..s
L. FAURE. Proprietor.
Worcester morning daily spy., 1898-03-13

AS if to forestall the report which 1t
is now practically assured the United
States naval court of inquiry at
Havana will give, that the Maine
was blown up from the out
side by a mine or torpedo, the
president of the Spanish court of SINH
lar character states that he and his coll
leagues have decided for various rea-
sons given, that the disaster was caused
by an internal explosion. These rea-
sons will hardly weigh against the more
convincing opposing ones which our
court is likely to give.
This being the case, demand for in
demnity from Spain is already foreshad-
owed. But win our government be sat
isfied with demanding an indemnity
Statements are being made to the con-
trary-that, coupled with the indem-
nifty demand, viii be another that the
war in Cuba must be Immediately end
ed.
Whether such demand would be re-
garded seriously by Spain is a question.
COlAit SuPDOoGdlJ MNll-liIlOl Hitu people
hold that fighting will cease, and by our
guarantee of Cuban bonds, the independ-
ence of Cuba will follow On the other
hand, Senor Morett Spanish minister
for the colonies, stated in a speech at a
Madrid banquet, quite recently, that
Spain will not allow an inch of her pres
ent territory to pass from her; that even
now the insurrection in Cuba is nearly
crushed, and that autonomy in Cuba is
a success-an allegation sceptically re-
ceived in the United States.
Another straw which seems to DISPOSE
of the idea that Cuban Independence
can be demanded without causing Span
ish hostilities with the United States is
the fact that the Spanish conservatives
in Cuba are now at one with the gov
ernment in favoring the autononist pro
gram.
With another rebellion under way in
the Philippine Islands, Spain will have
her hands full il she should reject un-
equivocally whatever demands the adj
ministration at Washington may make
There is no denying the reasonable
ness OF the belief that the pres
ent crisis will not be over
should the Maine incident be
peacefully closed If the administra-
ton, backed by congress, is determined
to aid Cuba to purchase her independ-
ence without reference to spain's wishes,
our relations with the latter country
Worcester morning daily spy., 1898-03-13
PopIins.

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SHOT POPLINS-These are entirely
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BAYADERE MARVELLIEUX, all the
popular light and dark shades, "A in.
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CANVAS CLOTHS, so in. wide, light
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GRANITE CLOTHS, plain colors and
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WATERPROOF CHEVIOTS, 60 in.
wide very serviceable and handsome in
shades of navy, green and brown, price
$1.25, $1.5O PER YARD
PLIESSE TUCKS-5 different color
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$3.50 PER YARD
BAYADERE CORDS-These are par
ticularly desirable, and are shown in
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ings. Price. 1925 PER YARD
Worcester morning daily spy., 1898-03-13

One by one the remaining noted gen
erals of the great war of the rebellion
are passing away. Gen. Rosecrans is
the latest of these. His name will long
be remembered, for he was an able com
mander, despite his failure at Chicka-
mauga. He was a man of force and
character, popular with his men, and he
showed his strategic ability both when
he commanded the right wing Of the
army of the Mississippi and later when
he was promoted to the leadership of
the army of the Cumberland. Never
theless, his mistake at Chickamauga
cannot be excused by many military
historians.
Worcester morning daily spy., 1898-03-13

The feature of the past week in the
Americans Spanish Cuban situation has
been the active preparation for possible
trouble carried on by both the United
States and Spain. Each side has been
looking about to buy new warships or
contemplating constructing some But
our government has been especially
solicitous with regard to coast fortifi-
cations, perhaps
Whether there will be war or not
probably not, if peace can be assured
with honor-this unusual attention paid
by the army and navy departments at
Washington to the proper defence of our
large stretches of coast, particularly to
that of the Atlantic, is well timed Bos-
ton and New York and the other large
ports have not been the objects Of so
much parental solicitude on the part of
Uncle Sam for years. For this solicitude
they have the Spanish war scare to
thank. All of these ports, it is safe to
say, will be better defended in the fu-
ture, and one or two of them are likely
to secure-for instance, Boston-what
has long been needed, proper docking
facilities.
Again, if the country is to emerge
peaceably from the present crisis, it will
be with an enlarged and better appoint
ed navy thanks to the unusual govern
ment appropriations; and the regular
army will with pleasure see its ranks
swelled by additional artillery regiments
and it's fortresses. armaments and
equipments strengthened and increased.
There is nothing like rumors of war
to stir up a country to a realizing sense
of its defensive deficiencies in the role
of a possible combatant, and to re-
solve to overcome them as rapidly as
possible. We shall be ready for trouble
unless it comes too soon or in unex-
pected force