The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1898-01-28
SANCTUM TROUBLE.

NlAANAl ~ 4u wv
The copy boy came busll.ng through the
composing room.
MIR JaFgcrs, he sid to the FOREMAN
"Mr. Hummer wants 70 ~c yoS right
away-Quick, %
Mr. Jaggrrs dr,prcd N'S pencil as he
arosc aud pushed hack his chair
81 wonder what In merry shcol iswrons
now he muitorcd,
A moment or two later he stood before
Che managing editor Of the grat daily
"Sit down, Jaggrrs,' S,id the editor
without looking up from his work "lO
see yon In n moment
Mr.. Jaggcrs sat down and sotily sighed.
He knew the symptoms He was In for a
had quarter Of an hour.
"wcl. Jaggcrs," said the great man
presently, "Ivc called YOU In TO tell yon
that things are all wrong in your depart.
ment, ard, by iIngO, they've SOS TO lie
straightcncd out"
ITO what do YOU refer, sir'' inquired
MIR. JagecrS
"To-what-do-I-rferF' echoed tie
editor in a tone Of excessive sarcasm.
"That's god Look here, Jaegers. Day
befor, yesterday you ran a cut In the pa
per which should have appcard ON The
woman's page. lt was officially deseribcd
as Pattern Of shirt waist for girl Of -
And what did you do! You ran it In the
PAPER upside down and called it Turkish
plan Of operations on the Macedonian
plainF
"Th that's what IL looked Ike upside
down. sir, " mumbled the unhappy Jag
gers.
"Hers, wait minute, " said the editor.
He turned to a speaking tube and whis
tied shrilly.
SIS that you, 6eorgel say, GeOrge, how
much did the sale fall of on the 2sdi
What's ,hati Sold 1000 extra' Ehl Three
hundred and eight new subscribersi
What's thati Everybody wants the war
mApi That's all, George
The editor dropped tho tube and turned
20 Mr.. Jaggers
.'You see" be cried, you're simply
making the paper ridiculous And now.
Just look at this e.
He opened another copy Of the paper and
pointed e a cerD n column.
How In the .fame OF the prophets he
harshly cried, did those headlines get 50
oontoundedly mixed What sort Of u title
do you call that for a column account Of a
Prohibition gathering
Mr.. Jaggers looked. and this Is the glar-
ing line that confronted him:
"wet Grounds
THAT" said the editor. evidently be-
longs on the baseball page. And now just
see what you've got there.
Again he handed the paper 10 Mr.. Jag
gers, and that nervous employee read this;
Drink Did II"
The editor crump!ed the paper In his
hand as be took II back.
That's fine slur on our struggling
ball club, isn't 10y Every man jack who
reads that headline will take It for grant
ed that the club was drunk and couldn' Z
play. What do you suppose the effect oi
such idiOtic headlines Is ON an intelligent
public! Listen TO this.
Again the editor seized the speaking
tube and whistlcd.
"Say, George" be called, have you
heard any comments on the headlines we
had in the paper yesterday Eh, what's
that-7s lettersi All pralsing the clever
work Of the new headline man' Get out
Is that soi"
Again the tube dropped. The great
editor was evidently taken little aback.
Then be rallied once more and again
pounced ON Mr.. Jaggers.
"There," he said, begin on that col
umn and read down. Then tell me what
you think Of such u diabolical mix upi
Read 1t aloud" "
This is what Mr.. Jaggers read:
"The silent man at the head Of the br'.
liant cayalcade rode speedily forward. Be
fore him rose the pine clad bills Of the
Hutchacoochie and far below flashed the
crystal waters Of the laughing Ockmulgee.
Suddenly be stopped and shading his eyes
with his hands looked steadily across the
valley.
&" Bring me my glassy be said.
1.-THE orderly quickly obeyed.
Raising the foaming beaker to her lips
the fair young girl cried:
For God and France
"Then with movement full Of limo
cent grace she half turned In her saddle
and cast the cup far over the cliff.
No other lips shall profane that
toast, she murmured. With lighter ali
she gently added:
And now, messieurs, let US advance.
We malt here, cried the silent man
and be tossed his cigar on the ground.
1.-THE staff quietly dimounted and stood
back in respectful silence. With knitteC
brow the general swept the horizon. One
he gestured and twice his lips moved
Then he nodded 70 himself The plan o.
battle was complete.
May, quoth the maid, we will NO
fight except IL be Gods will. like no
these scenes Of blood. AS for the plan O
battle, Of that have no conception. Wher
God directs me, will fght, and he vii
show Inc the way.
1.-THE little bodyguard gazed with rap
eyes upon the maiden where she stood II
the transhguring sunset light
Even us they gazed there came rud,
interruption.
Give Inc fresh cigar, cried tho gen
eral.
And be lighted 1t from a slow burning
match with coolness which belied tn
fact that the fate Of the nation was hang
ing on his next move
Mr.. Jaggers paused.
This is awful, he said
Awful is no name for it," cried tn
, editor. "You zee what you have doncS"
eyes" groaned Mr. Jaggers, 81 hay
mixed up On the Skirmish Line Will
Grant with the Annals Of Joan Of Arc.
"You bet you have, !" cried the editor
why, thing like that is enough 90 ruiz
the paper foreyerl How do you suppos
the public regards iii Listen to this. "
: Once more he snatGhed the tube:
"Say, George" lie shouted, chow dit
the papers go this morningi What's that
> Sold out three hours agOf Presses on OK
ira edtionY Mob in the officer What
the troubleS Eh They are all clamorinI
for the new composite romances Goo
landp
He dropped the tube and looked at Nj
Jaggers. His lips moved conyulsiyely. il
, snatched a memorandum from pigeo
hole.
fGD. no,.,,. - L., ,,,L t.,.,,.J ttT I,Iic..