davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

"Yon shonldn't, you know" he sAid. ''It's awfully bad for your inside ''
 After nll, it is my inside" retors- cd.
 "The stomaoh'-- began Cheedla
 "The stomach, said l, "is no doube very necessary part of the humAa body. But as tonic of conversation 10 fnils to interest me.
 "Wben you arc married" - said Cheedle.
 "When l am married, said I. "I shall try to conceal the ravages of inev- itable deterioration. i" "You will bo very interesting" ''I shall be unique, said |.
 There's an argument in favor of marriage, said he.
 "A fox, being caught in steel trAp by his tail, said solemnly, was slsd 10 compound for his escape with the loss of it, but upon coming abroad Into the world he began to be sensible of the disgrace '''-
 Sometimes" said Cheedls oritiosi- iy, "you approximate slightly to the ass. "
 "You don't approximate, rstortsd. You are the ass, pure and exceedingly simple"
 ''I am too happy to quarrel with yos, Phil, he said, laughing. "even if | had time. l just dropped in to leave my address and to ask you to come and hs introduced to my wife. She is dying to know you. You see. she has heard 70 much about you"
 "what has she heard2' asked, soms- what startled.
 "oh, only what 1 have told her. \ have edited you, you know"
 "I will come tomorrow" sAid I. "f l may bring my pipe"
 "She smokes cigarettes berssif," saad he "I am teaching her. The mater sAys she doesn't know what the modern wo- men are coming to. tell her 1 hQps they are coming to stay. Nell puts dowz all my smart things in her diary" T
 Has she put that downr' Asksd.
 "of course. !" said he
 I'm afraid she loves you very much. 1" said I.
 "I believe she does" said he. "wiu you come-dinner nt 7:80. and whatev- or you like atterwardf' "I will oome," said l.
 He ran away, and l turned to Bass.
 "He bears up well, said l.
 "Yes" said Bass. "She is rather nice, you know"
 "Ihope he edited me very carefully" said slowly.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
Vice For Sale.

Several good religious people. says the Louisville Commercial, "who are accustomed to drive out the Browne boro road, were considerably shocked the other morning when on passing . blacksmith shop at the edge of the town they were brought face to face with . large sign. Vice For Sale Here. One old lady, who has for years been identified with philanthropio and ohmrits bis work, was especially indignant. Purely in the interests of society she undertook to discover just what particular style of evil was for sale. Entering the shop with her nose high in the air, she ap- preached the proprietor. Man sh1 said, T understand you have vice for sale here. The brawny blacksmith fell back before the incarnation of naughty. offended virtue. Yes. ma'am.' he rs- piled weakly. Il, went on the woman austerely, am a member of the Soolsty For the Suppression of Vice. and wish to see what form of the deadly sin you have. The man turned and led the way to the back of the shop where oteel wise was screwed to s workbenoh. There 1t is, ma'am, and the very best steel too. It's dead cheap at sa.bo.' She has not yet recovered.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
THANKS FOR A TYRANT'S FALL.

The circling year that brought the ross And lily hastens to It's close; Not many times the sinking sun Shall set before It's sends are run. It brought us hints in moon and star Of grim and blood. envisaged war Till over April's sky of blue Was spread It's pail of inky hue. For the Great Power who understands And holds all nations In his hands Saw tyranny aLut our shore, And stricken hearts his aid implors. And so as by some angel sent. War came for just arbitrament. And naughty Spain's unpitying yoke For purer peace and freedom broke. For what our warning heroes won We give a heartfelt benison And thanks for wars so swift decree And human gains on land and sea. For barns we'll filled and gifts in store. For Ere edom's new~ extent of shore And space, may every grateful voice And heart with thanks this day reJoic,.
 JOEL BENTON.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

HE CHEEEED WITH THE LoUDEST.
 and the result is that all the feelings of your boyhood are imprisoned in your wrinkled old heart. Now, won't you give that boy a holiday"
 Mr. Putancall wavered, recovered himself, then hesitated again, and when he looked into the frank, good humored eyes that were watching him, he yield ed completely. He was experienced enough in the world to know that their honesty was unmistakable Grasping the proffered hand, he wrung it with the hearty enthusiasm of youth.
 Good !" exclaimed the Young Man. "Now, let me use your telephone for . few minutes, and will order dinner |; then we will go to the football match. !"
 "I have only $30," said Mir Putan- call while the young man was waiting for central to answer
 "That's more than enough" he re- piled. We can have the time of our lives on that. Hellol Is that the Del dorf? Tell the head waiter to come to the phone. It is always better to order dinner like this ahead, he observed to MT. Putancall, who had put on his street coat by this time
 "Helloi Is that you, Jean? Yes; want you to get up a Thanksgiving dim ner for two to be served in one of the private rooms at 2 sharp. No, sir, you can't have carte blanche I know just what I want. Now take down what tell you. First I want two orders of olams-oysters are superstition, he remarked aside. "Got that? Then some- thing really good in clear soup. Tor may decide on that yourself. Next we want Lake Ontario whitefish. Whats that? The close season for them, you say? I know it is, but that shouldn't trouble you. Oh, you think you know where you can get one? All right, and this is the way you are to cook it: Dress two pound fish and put 1t on the range in a kettle of cold water. As soon as the water comes to boil take it off, and the fish will be done. Notice if the flesh cracks open at the back of the neck, and you can tell if it is done exactly right. Then you are to serve it with egg sauce. Next we want roast turkey-a turkey hen, remember, not muscular gobbler and you are to stuff it with old fash toned country dressing of onion and bread crumls Then we want apples, nuts and such things. Besides, you are to send down to that little old liquor store on Chambers street for couple of bottles of hard cider-the special brand that the farmers put white wheat in | and flavor with sassafras. Got it down all right? And be sure to have dinner ready to serve at o'clock. Goodby." "Now," exclaimed the Young Man, Eve must hurry if we want to be in time for the football match"
 "Are we going there?" asked MT. Putancall, with mingled surprise and uneasiness.
 | Certainly we are. What would Thanksgiving day be without taking in the football matohi We just have time to catch tho next IL express if we rush.
 While they hurried along the street and then raced up town on the express the Young Mans tone changed gradual, ly. While still retaining his frankness and gayety, he skillfully led Mir. Putan- call to talk of the matters with which he was familiar until he regained his self possession and habitual air of com mand. When they reached the Polo grQpnds. the fnancier was So complete
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

cd. "my sins are not troubling me, and think I have enough brains to carry me through this difficulty"
 Still the fact remained that he didn't know where he was going to get his Thanksgiving dinner, or. what was still more important, how he was going to get ticket for the Yale Harvard football match.
 At first he let his mind dwell on the Thanksgiving days he had spent in the past, and then he gradually veered around to those he had seen described in stories, but he could find no connection between his present case and any he had experienced or seen described.
 "In the stories have read," he thought to himself, "some miserly mil lionaire is always made happy by hav- ing his flinty heart softened so that he spends much money in charity. Now, being poor. I am just in the position to make miserly rich man happy by let ting him help me. '"
 A few minutes more of reflection made the whimsicality uf the idea de- lightful, and he decided to act on it. But the first thing to do was to catch his millionaire. Stepping into hotel reading room, he looked through copy of Sunday paper in which he had mo- ticed series of interviews with rich men, in which those ever interesting in- dividuals had confided to the reporter their plans for Thanksgiving day. He pead:
 "I shall spend the day in attending to business,' said Mir. Putancall curtly.
 He'll do." said the Young Man to Himself, "for besides being rich and crusty he is bachelor"
 It took him about an hour to walk down town to old Putancall's office {; but, being without street car fare, he had no choice but to pace off the dis
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
What s s.lnT!"


 "I am here to do you great kind 1 ness. Then he added, before Mir. Put AaoAll had time to adjust his mind to this unprecedented state of affairs, By the bye, how many years is it since any one has called on you in the way of kindness?"
 This unusual question simply tripped the financier into deeper confusion, and he looked at the daring Young Man in blank astonishment.
 "Now, see here," said the Young Man, noticing his advantage and assum- ing an air of authority, "you have earned over $5, 900, 900, and you don t know how to enjoy $5 bill. You are here in your office today simply because you don't know what else to do, and you are feeling wretched because the ab- sence of your assistants makes it impos- sible for you to smother your feelings with effective work. Why aren't you enjoying Thanksgiving day? Haven't you anything to be thankful for?'' These direct criticisms and searching questions reduced Mir. Putancall to a condition of helplessness that made the Young Mans magnetism tell more on him every minute.
 1T saw what you said to the reporter who interviewed you last week and made up my mind that it would be an act of charity to prevent you from keep ing your word about working today. How much money have you got in your pocketi"
 This question immediately filled Mir. Putancall's mind with fear. Was this mysterious stranger going to rob him? He instinctively reached for the mes- senger call.
 "That's all right" said the Young Man. "You may ring for the police if you like, but before they have arrived shall have convinced you that you have made mistake Mir. Putancall withdrew his hand. "But why do you want to know how much money I havef"
 ,"Because you will have to pay the expenses of the days fun. And 1t will be a new sensation for you to do it. Really, MT. Putancall, your case. is one that I sympathize with. When you came to New York years ago, it was your intention to win n modest fortune and then go back to live among your old friends. By the time you had ao- quired such fortune as you had at first dreamed of your old friends had scattered or become estranged and you had become so accustomed to business life that you could do nothing else.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17


 PATIENTLY, "wELLf' tance. On his arrival he at first thought the place was deserted; but hearing footsteps, Mir. Putsncall came out of his private room to investigate. He was in decidedly grumpy and dissatisfied hu- nor, for the absence of his heads of de- partments and clerks made him realize that, after all, he was only one man. Without them he was like an octopus shorn of it's tentacles. The Young Man stood and looked him over quizzically. "Wellp exclaimed MT. Putancall impatiently, "well'
 "wellr' responded the Young Man, smiling.
 What can I do for your" asked MT. Putancall with rising anger. He was not accustomed to being echoed in that way.
 Nothing" said the Young Man cheerfully.
 "Then you will have to excuse me, for am busy" And he stepped back into his private office. The Young Man followed him. "You are too hasty," he said. "The boot is on the other leg. \ ana here to as xomstAin9 fer you."
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
THANKSGIVING PUDDING.
Rich and Toothsome Enough to Tempt .
 Sated Appetite.

sated Appetite.
 Good Housekeeping gives the following recipe for a Thanksgiving pudding: Soak D pint of cracker crumbs in 8 pints of milk for half an hour; wash cupfuls of Cali iornia seedless raisins boil them in water to cover while the crumbs arc soaking Mix cupfui of sugar, teaspoonful of salt and half teaspoonful each of cinnA- mon and nutmeg; add tablcspoonfuls of butter and beat until creamy. Beat in 6 eggs, one at a time, beating each until none of the yoik is seen before adding an other; then stir this into the milk, into which the raisins have becn stirred (with- out the water in which they were cookcd) Butter . deep pudding dish thick with cold butter, turn in the pudding and cover 1t. Bake In moderate oven During the first hour occasionally stir up the pudding from the bottom to keep the raisins on top. Bake hours in all, removing the cover at the last to brown 1t. It should whey little when done. Do not cut tho raisins Serve with hard sauce of half n cupful of butter, crcamed, Q cupful pow dcred sugar added gradually and favored with lemon or vanilla To mako this into B soft sauce beat In . tablcspoonfuls of thick cream or the white of an egg
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

come his way by thousands. but he still lives Jacky is fond of a holiday, and one of the things that go to complete . perfectly spent holiday with Jacky Is . good "squure meal" with "vittles" of different kind than the oommissary supplies. "Soft bread and shore food" are the main parts of this repast. and there must be lots of them. While Jacky enjoys every holiday that comes along the one in which he finds the most pleasure is Thanksgiving day. This is especially true when the ships are in some home port or in the navy yard. Then Jacky is sure he can have what ever he wishes for.
 The regular routine work of the ships as far as possible is suspended for the day. and after "quarters" the men are allowed the freedom of the ship. The mess quarters are decorated with the ensigns and signal flags, while the long rows of tables are abundantly supplied with all the delicacies of the season from the turkey which the men call "the buzzard, with its cranberry sauce and other garnishings, to the choicest fruits the market affords. Usually an outside cook is called in to prepare the meal, for every man in the ship Is going to enjoy the holiday. and no one works. There are other things that occupy Jacky's mind besides the "grub, as he calls it. for the day is long, and there are lots of things that can be done. As soon as "quarters" are over the amuse- ment usually begins with parade and review, at which all the officers of the ship are asked to be present. It is not a dress parade, where the men have to wear their regulation uniforms nor do the tactics as prescribed by the govern
 ment carry any weight. The uniforms and tactics are of the mems own get up,
 and each participant does about as he likes when the commands are given. The uniforms are remarkable, there be- ing no two alike. Every color in the rainbow goes to make up some part of the grotesque costumes worn by the men. This Is one opportunity the men have of showing their like or dislike for some of the officers in a mild way. During the drill, which lasts about half
 an hour, the commands aSe given to
 mimic some of the officers, while the
 men themselves perform all kinds of queer antics.
 After the drill few athletic sports
 are indulged in before the little red
 pennant Is run up to the signal arm
 and "mess gear" is sounded. They find
 desirable spot for the purpose. Then
 football, baseball and other games are
 enjoyed. Jacky's speciality is "pig chas-
 ing," and, without good healthy
 porker, well greased, to give him run
 about the grounds, the day would be lost.
 Often the pig is too lively for the boys,
 and many of them get good tumble
 before he is finally captured.
 Suddenly the familiar sound of the bugle comes over the water to the place
 where the men have Leen enjoying themselves. They do not wait for the
 second call One seems enough, and
 they drop everything they have been
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
Decline Of Religious Obssrva.oes.

Ever since the game dinners eaten by Governor Bradford's constituents and their Indian allies 276 years ago, Thanks- giving day has been . feast day, and . day for family reunions People, especial ly New Englanders, go hack to their old homes by thousands to enjoy 1t with "the old folks, or, If obliged to stay away, celebrate it wherever they arc In New England style Less and less attention Is paid to the religious observanccs, and while in the old times a long sitting In Q chilly meeting house while the parson ponderously progressed from his text to "fifteenthly, my brethren" was the uni vcrsai prelude to the prandial exercises, there arc now comparatively few attend. ants at church on Thanksgiving morn Ing. Boston Herald
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

 perhaps so much about Thanksgiving ss about some method by which he can have the ribs ironed out of the roof of his mouth, and his tongue reduced to such 6 size that he won't talk thick. The persimInon is sort of wild plum.
 which is. however. not as wild as him that partakes of 1t not wisely. but toe soon. Small boys find unbounded pleas, ure in gathering the persimmon, be. cause it clings so tenaciously to the limb that it compels him to throw stones and clubs among the branches until he ia as sore as one afflicted with inflammatory rheumatism. The force expended by a boy in knocking down ten persimmons is about equal to that necessary to chop two cords of wood or to learn page of Latin. That Is why he is so fond of persimmons. If he could pick them in punches like grapes, n wQnld not eat them. -ReEsimmons are
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
---~----~~-------- Tnspksgivipgs In Europe.

Thanksgiving day comes down to us from New England's earliest times, and so docs the turkey The pumpkin pie had its birth in Massachusetts and Connecti cut, though cranberry sauce has less ancient and honorable history. But Thanksgiving was not original in New England Days set apart for giving thanks to the Almighty were known in Europe before the reformation and were in frequent use by Protestants afterward, especially in tho church of England. where they were a fixed custom long be- fore they were in ths coloniss- New York MoylA
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

you feel thank ful, when you have bitten off a mouthful of it,
 that you didn't bite off two mouthfuls. Any one who takes . good sized bite out oA a persim- mon that is not quite ripe and feels his mouth pucker until 1t 8 ee m s like 8 m a c k @ rel sky 1ooop,t think
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
Choosing the Turkey.

In choosing a turkey select one with white flesh and fat. Turkeys with long hairs should be avoided; also those whose back and legs have purplish tinge The birds when young have smooth, black legs, with Gin the cock) short spurs- The feet of young turkeys will be supple. The turkey should be hung as long as possible without aeQuisins any tain& --Exchanss
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

like dollars. 1t Is the dimoG.;y n get ting them that makes them so dear. Andthey come at Thanksgiving when the paper rose blossoms in the bosom of the market turkey and gladness and joy perform double song and dance from one end of the county to the other. So much for the persimmon which is now in the market, whore it ought to stay.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

spent his last 26 cent piece in pur- chasing a bou- tonniere of Yale blue violets ; then he walked up Fifth avenue, Ne v York. to mediate on what he had to be thankful for.
 My liver is in excellent condi- tion, i" he reflect
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
THE NAVY'S TURKEY.
HOW THE JACKlsS ENJOY THEIR
 DAY OF THANKS.

How They aGuy" the Omcers During the Novel Annual Parade and Re- view Aboard ship Chasing the Creased PIG.
 (copyrisht. 1898, by F. A. verdul
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
Turkey Dressing.

A turkey may Do stuffed with chestnut forcemeat or truffies It Is iuost excellent stuffed with mushrooms and served with . mushroom sauce.-Exchange.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
The Future of Travel.

"What is rapid transit. Uncle Chris!'
 Rapid transitF Why. it is electric oars which have to run so fast that they never stop to take on passengers "-Ds. treit Free Pssss.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

T IS undoub btedly
 true that Jacky,
 and that means the sailorman of Un- cle Sam's navy, is more thankful this | year than ever be- fore-he Is thank full he's alive.
 Spanish shails haya
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

that the cran- ISN'T HE A BIRD! berry s1ucarnadined smile is intensified by the turkeys flush of pride.
 The turkey is bird among birds a dish among dishes, a dream among dreams.
 When the small boy eats the drumstick,
 Like an ear of corn, by hand And he somehow doth his thumb stick
 In his eye to beat the band. Then the greatness of the turkey all win
 fully understand.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

sauce is some- times strained,
 but not in it's re- lations with the turkey. They go together % har- moniously that they are one, and several poets say
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

IN ALL HIS 9IORf. f6R6C ne so IA4 outsoars the eagle that to compare them seriously would be like casting oxalts acid upon the OK.
 It is believed by many thinking peo- pie that Thanksgiving was invented ts give the turkey distinction and a pres tige and to give us medium through which to offer our gratitude while ex- perienoing perennial thrills of pleasure, The selection of the turkey for the star part was happy, because every one likes turkey, be it hot, cold or canned. Un- like veal, corned beef and fishballs, the turkey Is a concrete symphony that causes every soul to ripple in song. Ola and young are alike victims to its peer less quality.
 The young eat it with their first teeth, the middle aged attack it with their second teeth, the old masticate it with their third or store teeth, and it is even toothsome to the toothless. The cran- berry's chief distinction is that which it enjoys in being the tail end of the Thanksgiving ticket. The cranberry
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17
WHO SAID PUMPKIN

golden pie that PIE!
 lifts one to realms of fairy gold, it is not wonderful that it should gild our pass ing thoughts at this particular season and fill our spirits with liveliest antici- pations of the glories of Thanksgiving. Whether the pumpkin pic be made at home by hand or in o factory by ma chinery the effect seems to be the same. You cannot taste the wheels in the fac tory made pie because the pumpkin pie is wheel itself whose magnificence dwarfs the other wheels into insignifi- canoe. Furthermore, it is pumpkin pie, and when you say that you have no room for hostile argument. The pump kin pie, whether square, round or ob- long, is warranted to adjust itself to any stomach, the stomach gracefully exerting all its power of elasticity that the pie may be comfortably located, to assimilate with the turkey, until the spirit is suffused with dreams of peace and resignation and the diner feels so kindly toward every ybody and every thing that he refuses to doubt the &C., curaoy of ice scales and gas meters, while the fact that the plumber is re- garded as moral monstrosity strikes him as an empty fantasy. Still he would doubtless prefer to make bar gain with plumber while clear headed and unpied. In conclusion, our opin- ion of the pumpkin at Thanksgiving tide Is such that we can recall no proud or moment than that at which we were pointed out as being ''some pumpkins. !"
 R. K. MUNKTTRICK.
Connecticut western news., 1898-11-17

L00 uhblOuul DlTu.
 The turkey may not equal tho eagle as a Fourth of July minstrel,
 but as a biped calculated to gild the feeting mo- rnents of the T b n k 8 g lying feast he SO far