Montgomery County sentinel. [volume] (Rockville, Md.) 1855-1974, 1898-01-21
MAN UNDER THE BED.
ny CHARLES u. LEWIS.

When Colonel Northrop retired from
the army, at the age Of 90, and set up
in bachelor apartments in town, he had
several things to pride himself about.
He had made an honorable record. No
one In the Northrop family had ever
| disRraoed the name. His windows were
provided with burglar proof locks of his
own invention, and no had sang froid
which nothing could startle him out Of
The colonel was we'll satisfied with him
self and the world at large, and those
who knew him best said he ought to DO.
Atmidnight one night Colonel North
rop came home from his club In his usu-
al good humor, and, finding couple Of
letters on his table, sat down to read
them before going to bed. When finally
ready to retire, he was half asleep, and
he was no sooner between the sheets
than he departed for the land of nod.
Just one hour later by the clock he
opened his eyes and sat up in bed,
thing which hadn't happened since his
boyhood days.
Some sound had disturbed him, but
just what it was he could not tell. The
idea that any sound should thus infiu-
enoe him aroused his ire, and after a
moment he sprang out of bed and lighted
the gas. He meant to make tour of his
rooms and see IL his celebrated burglar
proof window locks were all right, but
as he was ready to move no was jumped
foot high by the sound Of a sneeze I'M
der his bed. 1t was II mans sneeze--a
hearty, wholesome sneeze with note
Of defiance in it. The colonel had boast.
ed that nothing could startle him out of
his everyday plaoidity, but mere sneeze
had done it, and he was furious about
it. He dropped on his knees and looked
under the bed, and what he saw was u
man stretched at full length on the floor
"Hal You rascal, but I've got you'll"
exclaimed the warrior as he made out
the form of the intruder.
II guess not, colonel, was tho cool
reply.
An army revolver, endeared by old
associations, reposed in drawer not
far away, and the colonel jumped for il
and said:
Now, then, you roll out here or I'll
blow your head off. "
w - liJtiO blOWy TtDlltu
the man under the bed. eve also got
a gun, and the instant you stoop down
I'll send bullet into you
"You-you will?'
II will for sure, and guess l II shoot
at one Of your legs as 1t H."
Acting on tho impulse Of the moment,
the colonel sprang upon his bed, but 10
seconds later no was 80 mad to think
he had jumped that he leaped to the
floor with the exclamation:
Come out here now or you are
dead MANI
That's all bluff, colonel, said the
intruder. Pull on your trousers and sit
down and take things easy"
The colonel obeyed. He obeyed be-
cause 1t suddenly struck him that he
didn't look dignified without trousers
and that he would need them anyway |
when no came to escort the man out |
doors and hand him over to the police. |
He sat down because his knees trem-
bled under him and that very fact made |
him boil over with anger and chagrin. |
With tho revolver pointed under the |
bed no queried:
"When did you get into this room?"
About o'clock, colonel. "
GLOW did you get in2'
Through that window to your left.
You thought yourself smart when you
put that wonderful catch Oh the sashes,
but 1t did not bother me five minutes.
l wish all windows were provided with
such soft snap"
L., I,rA l,nH
dowP' shouted tho colonel, who had re-
peatedly told his friends that he would
give any burglar leave to work ON his
patent all night
"Then I'm IL liar and you are gen
tlemani However, don't blame you
for feeling bit sore. l heard of your
patent and your boasting long ago, and
/ knew / could take you down peg
when had few minutes to spare. 1t
was easy, colonel, dead easy"
But what are you in here forl"
Robbery, colonel. That's my trade,
you know. / had "A pal with me who
took off bag Of stuff, while staid be-
hind to investigate further and was
hidden under the bed when you came
In. l was about to crawl out and go
through your clothes when you awoke."
Now, then, are you coming out?"
Numbered the colonel.
well, hardly-not just yet"
"Then I'll shoot you where you are "
mo, you won't. The minute l see
your legs moving / shall open fire on
them. From where you sit your bullets
can reach me, while have dead sure
thing ON your legs. Go slow, colonel. "
The colonel was up on strategic posi-
tions, and he realized that the enemy
had all the advantage. While furiously
angry, he retained all his common sense
and figured that be must temporize.
II he was to capture instead Of being
captured, he must resort to diplomacy.
He therefore controlled himself to say !:
You must see that you cannot es-
cape, and 1t will DO better II you quiet
ly surrender"
That's where we differ, colonel, !"
calmly replied the man under the bed.
"All have TO do is TO shoot you through
the legs and make my way out by the
window. 1t depends ON you, however.
What's the use Of being so peppery
habits should have perfect control over
himself. "
"You villainp Missed the colonel be.
tween his clinohed teeth.
''No use to call names. might call
you an old brag and blowhard. but thai
wouldn't help the case any. It's Away
better to argue point. What is the ex
act time, colonelp'
Its time / called in the police anc
had you out Of this, and here goes
Click, click 1t was the man unde
the bed getting ready to FIRE on tn
, colonel's legs, and the colonel happil,
realized 1t and fell back into his chair