The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1898-10-05

"'Pulled off fer constable, Sim says
Il s'posed you knowed that been
wantin' To run fer constable, too, and
that if Jake run there wouldn't be no
use o. my running, and that says to
Jake that if he'd pull of I'd give him
the gun, and that Jake said he'd pull
of, and that give him the gun and he
pulled off. s'posed you knowed that,
says Sim. I'D rather be constable than
have the gum says he.
THAT made me so consumed mad that
l went home and run agin Sim for con-
stable myself, and beat him outen his
boots. Then what does Sam kriter
do but marry Jake Peeler's daughter
jimmie, and Jake gives him the gun for
wedding present, and he had it ever
since. So when he come round and
said he wanted to sell the gun, L says to
him:
"'Sam,' l says, what do you want to
sell the gun for? It's good gun, amt
it?'
"'Good gum says Sam. We'll, there
want never no better gun pinted at a
bear than that gun is says he. No,
nor as good one, by smoke, says he.
Then what in Sam Hill do you want
to sell it for?' says. Amt short o
money, be your l says.
"'Not particular Sam says, but 1
hired out to Miles Boyd to do the work
on his farm, and not fer to be minute
man, by smoke! And don't hire my
gun out to Miles, not by durn sight
says Sam. Now jest look a-her how
things is runnin'. Only yesterday 1
was settin' on the back stoop up to
Miles, greasin' double harness. Miles
he was doin' chores round the barn
yard. His chickens was scratchin'
and peckin' away, when cheeky big
hawk sweeps down from somewheres
or other, and sweeps away ag'in with
one o Miles chickens. Course didn't
see none O. this, but suddenly l heerd
Miles say:
Samuel, git your gum"
Il alluz keep my gun jest behind the
kitchen door, says Sam, and when
heerd Miles holler, l maturity runs and
grabs it, and runs with it to the barn
yard. AS got there Miles hollers:
"Yonder he is, gol ding him!" and
he pointed up into a dead pine tree
more'n quarter of mile away, where
the hawk was settin', rippin' his dinner
outen Miles's chicken. "Yonder he Isl"
Miles hollers. He's got the dominick
hen! Whang him, gol ding him!"
Vow says Sam, 4 wa Mt a goin' to
strain that gun by whangin' hawk
that was quarter o8 a mile away, and
/ started To sneak up a little, but the
hawk must knowed the gun, for he
riz and sailed away, and in less'n two
seconds he was so far that a cannon
ball couldn't a overlook him. So went
back to my harness greasin', and put
the gun behind the door ag'in- Miles
old woman was weedini onions in the
garden down back o. the house
was gittin' pooty we'll along with my
harness greasin' when I heerd a squeai
and a yell down in the garden, and
Miles old woman iz her voice and
hollered:
Samuel, git yer gum"
Il grabs the gun ag'in an pixies fer
the garden. AS got there, says Sam,
the old woman she pipes out:
"Yonder he goes! Down yonder
he runs, lords the brush lot. He's got
/ one o my bramer hens chickens!" she
pipes.
Its a ding funny hawk to be
/ runnin'." says.
"Dain't no hawk" boilers the old
woman. "It's a blacksnake, and he's
bigger'n bean pole" she boilers
81 hurried on with my gum says
Sam, but the blacksnal1e got to it's
! hidin' place, and I couldn't find him.
81 went back and put my gun be-
hind the door says Sam, and took up
the harness greasip' agin. / hadn't
been at IL more'n 90 minutes when
( Miles boy Tommy he come runnin' up
! from the back medder a-hollerin':
samuel, git your gum"
4 drops the harness and grabs the
! gun and follered Tommy down to the
medder.
/ There's big grounding got his
! hole in our medder," says Tommy. as
we run. "an' he's eat up half o. our
/ clover CROP
II sot down in that medder and
watched till shutdown fer that ground
/ hog TO come outen his hole, and be tore
TO splinters with that gun, but he never
come out says Sam, and l shoulders
/ my gun and went home
Hawks, snakes and groundhogs'll
make produce on this here farm come
high IL things keep on" says I.
After supper me and Miles was set
tin on the back stoop smokin' our pipes
when we see a man comm on a run
down the road. It was our neighbor,
Job Spring. He stopped at the fence,
and az soon as he could get his breath
he hollered:
samuel, git your gum"
L jumps for my gun, and we run out
TO the fence to find out what had struck
the farm now.
IA slammin' big bear has Jest
come outen your pastur'," says Job,
land has gone inter the woods with one
| o. your lambs!" he saws.