Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1898-05-04

5okes.-Indianapolis Journal.
Harry, do you love your little baby
brother?" whats the use? He
wouldn't know 1t If 1 did"-Tit-Bits
An Exceptional Case.-"He's very
timic, is he noty" every. Why. he's
so timid that he's scared by war
| scaresr'-Puck.
/ After the Battle.-He-Then I go
/ and forever. She-Very well! But
don't call tomorrow evening; for
sha'n't be in.--Life.
At doesn't do any good to scold the
does. / get all warmed up when l tals
to him."-Chicago News.
She|I like your impudence. l
haven't reached the bargain counter
yet. He-You would be a bargain on
any counter.-Harper's Bazaar.
Il have just taken my newly grad
uated grandson into business with me-"
"HOw are YOU getting on with himw
well. seen 10 please him."-Life.
Johnny-Is lingo a man who would
Ike TO make war on all foreigners!
Papa-Yes, my son; and he would pre-
fer to talk the enemy to death.-Puck.
He-Do you know when you get
had coin? She-Certainly do. How
do you know?" "Why, the man 1 Of
fer 1t to refuses to take it."-Yonkers
Statesman.
A Pointed Inquiry.-Stern Father
Henry. have you and your new watch
parted company already? Henry ia
ronicallyeBroke. Father-Which?- P
jewelers. Weekly.
= Useless Advice.-Wiggles-M physi-
clan has ordered me never to take ac-
tive exercise after a hearty meal. Wag.
gles-Well, what Of It? Wiggles-l
board.-Somerville Journal.
The Rev. Longnecker-I wish l could
think of some way to make the con-
Eregation keep their eyes on me during
the sermon. Little Tommy-Pa, yo1
want to put the clock right behind the
pulpit.-Boston Traveller.
Ethel-Why didn't You attend Prof.
Dumps lecture on the Cycles OF
THmeT 1t was very interesting.
Maude-The subject OF the lecture was
embarrassing 10 me. You know, dear.
I bought my wheel on the installment
plan.-Pittsburg Press.
Il shall not call upon you next week
nor the week after" said the young
man. In fact, l shall not call upon
you until after Easter" Why not"
Ihe asked, anxiously Because l am
giving up what love best-for Lent"
raid he.-Harpers Bazaar.
She-Don't you think Mrs. Wapstey
Il a beautiful woman? He-She is a
beautiful woman-the most beautiful
l think, that 1 have ever seen.
She (after he has gone)-I wonder II he
has always been such fool. or wheth-
r 1t has just begun TO grow on him
Leader.
Ohollie-Maud has to wear glasses;
he oculist says she has been using Ler
yes too much. Charlie should say
70, You ought TO have seen her at The
lance the other night: she was Just
by men all the time.-Har-
Jer's BaZar.
She-Ah, count. you don't know how |
ny love for you dlstresses my parents! |
heard my father say this morning
hat he would give $4,000 if l could |
ever see you again. The Counties
Ink ?-Chicago News.
Little Tompkins-That fellow Brown
ried to stuff me up with some Of uis |
raveleTs' tales the other day. Talked
bout his trip to Italy, and the waving |
elds of macaroni, but he didn't catch |
re, you know. They don't wave
lunch.
Parson-Ah, my friend, rum brought |
ou here, of course, l, too, used to |
rink. but for ten years not drop Of ,
quor has passed my lips Convict J
-scuse me. pard. but I don't want to
roubles of me own.-Life.
Anxious Mother-I think you should
Interfere. Edward. There is young
tumps sitting for the last half-hour
rith Mabel. holding her hand. You
now that he's not in a position to mar
y. Father (complacently)-True; but
It him hold her hand, Martha; it will
eep her from the piano-Exchange.
Restful Rogers tringing suburban
e's door-bell at ! a. m.p'Scuse me,
ard-but me and Weary Willy and I;
Dusty Rhodes and Frosty Fagin 's
-tryin' ter sleep out in your barn.
nd wouldn't yer be kind enough ter
hloroform dat kid, or put him under a