The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1897-12-17

"
~Inanks. Maclinaw," said the man
from over Sinnemahoning way. "Your
gentle humor goes far toward dissipat-
ing certain sadness and tendency to
abstraction and fit of the blues that
always assail me when think of that
kicking fever of the Sinnemahone, and
thank you! When I see the fertile
acres of the Jepheniah Bffkins estate
spreading along the Sinnemahoning' S
classic bottom and think how they
would now all be mine but for that
kicking fever l am prone to sadness.
But you've knocked 'em silly this time,
Mackinaw.
Eyes. yes. Those rich Jepheniah
Biffkins acres would now be mine but
for that kicking fever that came to the
Snnemahone country. These acres
then belonged to Deacon Judd Peeler,
and the deacon's daughter Nancy had
promised to be my wife. and Nancy was
heir to all the wide Peeler estate. So
when I think-but let that pass. 1t is
all over now.
"Wherever that most singular all
ment could have come from no one ever
knew, but it certainly cut a wide swath
along the Sinnemahone. Twas off down
the river when ii began its attack, and
consequently I DIDN'T know anything
about it until got back home couple
of weeks later. The first person it struck
was Uncle Billy Tope. Uncle Billy was
a mild and easy-going citizen that no
one would have thought had any life
in him at all, and he was a strict tee
totaler. Consequently you may imagine
the establishment of Squire Bunker.
who owned the sawmill where Uncle
Billy worked, to see the old man com
ing up the road one day, giving a tre-
mendous kick every two or three steps
: he took, sometices to the right and some
y times to the left, as If he might have
: storted oat TO kick all creation into the
middle of next week. Squire Bunker
was scared, and he edged off to one side
of the road as Uncle BILLY came along,
kicking and scufIing and looking as
wild as an Indian. The squire venturetN
to say as the old man was cavorting by:
"What's up, William?'
"Uncle Billy only shook his head. and
giving a ok that didn't miss the
equire's jaw by more than half an inch,
went on his way toward home. kicking
as he went.
'Astounding!' exclaimed the squire.
4 never thought Pd live long enough
to see Uncle Billy Tope turn out to be
drinker!'
"Then the squire started, for home.
He hadn't gone hundred yards before
he began to feel little mulish himself,
and the first thing he knew he was
kicking away as unreasonably as Uncle
Billy. He couldn't stop it any more
than he could have stopped his mill race
with a three-inch plug. The squire
didn't have for to go, and before he
could reach out and open his door he
had kicked it open with bang, and his
wife came running out of the kitchen to
see what was the matter.
"'Clear the way. mother!' the squire
hollered. Give me room! Don't get in
my way or I'll make widower of my
self at one swoop!
"The squire's wife, cared almost to
death. locled herself up b. closet. and
the squire kicked his wsy out of the
4 back door and bropgh tupl the gars~n,
where he yelled for some ne to come
and tie him down, or else tnru him into
> ten7acre lot Rbereihe could have room.
"And that's the way that most unac-
coDBtable kicking fever started along
the Sinnemahone. In less than a week
1t had taken a whack at almost every
man. woman and child in that baili-
Eui0l The Einls iprr NIL ha
monitory symptom of the fever. After
tie victim had kicked high and kicked
low, and to the windward and to the
leeward, for half an hour or so. the fit
would pass away, but it would come
back again after awhile. The kicking
stage of the epidemic lasted two days,
and then the second stage came on.
This was a scorching fever. Sam Belts
when he got over his attack declared
that his fever was so hot that his wife
had TO keep the sheets wet to prevent
their catching fire, but Sam wasn't
native of the Sinnemahoning country
He was from this side of the mountain
somewhere, and folks didn't believe
him. The fever lasted day. and left
behind IL a consuming longing for
something to drnk-not water nor
coffee nor tea nor milk. but rum. rye,
apple juice. anything that had tooth
and edge to it. This strange symptom
of the malady was discovered in start
ling way. Dominic Dibble was the first
victim that it developed in. One even
ing while half dozen of his flock were
mingling their sorrow with the domin-
les over his affection he suddenly
shouted:
"'Give me rum! Fetch me some
scorching rye or biting gin!'
1.-THE brethren and sisters were
shocked, but Dominic Dbble kept on
hollering for rum. No one made a move
TO get him any. and at last he sprang out
of his chair, rushed out of the house.
-s~~~~-s-.1,1asnus
and made straight for the tavern like
man running to a fire. By and by he
came back singing:
Home again, home again.