Smyrna times., 1897-12-29
WAS GETTING EVEN.
A WAITER GIVES A CUSTOMER ALEs-
SON IN IMPORTUNlNG.

This bread and butter goes with the
pork and, doesn t it?'
YES, sir "
And this glass of water?'
Certainly, sir. -
well, that s all want"
Yes, sir. Like to try a cup of our
chocolate?"
mo. If want anything else, III
call for it. y =
The waiter stepped back, but returned
presently to ask:
Wouldn't you like to have me bring
you some Of our homeless Goldfish? It's
the best in the country"
NO"
ing?'' W ''''-1
Don't want any.
. It's first class. "
That's all right l don't want II ,,
i think you'd like our roast beef and
Drowned potatoes "
Didn't you hear me say that if l
wanted anything else l would call for
it?' 0''-- Aoi
Eyes, sir -
The waiter stepped back again. but
III few moments returned to the at
tack.
Excuse me for saying so, my friend.
but you look as if you might be needing
some kind of game. Suppose you try
our jacksnipe on toast. "
Great Scott! Don't you reckon
know what | want?'
Yes, sir. Our jaclzsnipe is fresh
and good. Everybody needs to eat game
once IN awhile. Kind of tones up the
system - W
I've told you don't want any. "
Yes, sir. Rabbits amt good this
time OF year or we'd have some rabbit
Squads are about as good as wild game
though, Like to try broiled SQUAD on
toast?' "a
I'D like to eat my pork and beans
In peace Bring me some more water.
will you?" '''-'
Yes, sir shan't I bring you some
iced tea?'' '-'-o
Not any iced tea. )"
Its very fine -
Don't want it, -
Its good for some people: tones mn
the system. " ' ~
That's all right. Bring me that
water will your
yes, sir. -
lie went away and returned in an in
credlbly short space of time.
Here's your water, " he said. 'but
think you'd find our iced coffee mighty
fine " ''7-'''
The guest made no reply.
Better let me bring you some iced
coffee, sir. "
"nen want any iced coffee or any
thlng else, I'll let you know"
Ever try any of our stewed musb-
rOoms?" ''''-'
No. and | don't want to try any of
your stewed mushrooms either y
You needn't be afraid of them. sir.
They re all right. We guarantee them
ana there amt any better in the United
States. " ---'~'
q don't''-
Some people, you know, are afraid
Of mushrooms. Ours are selected with
great care. The man we get our musb.
rooms from Is an expert He raises 'em
scientifically
Say, do you know you're a con-
founded nuisance?"
II hope not, sir. I'm only TRYING
your own way of doing business ON
you -
What do you mean?''
You run barber shop on State
treet, don't you?"
Yes. What of that?"
You have the chair next to the
ront door, l Think"
Eyes. "
Well, went to your shop last Sat
lrday to get shave. You shaved mo.
on tried to get me to have my hair ,
ut. You told me ought to have a
hampoo You said my hair needed
lngelng. You wanted to know if
adn t better have some tonic or bav :
UNI You wanted to sell me a sDecial :
having mug and brush You bored me =
very minute you were shaving me. and q
SAID to myself that if | ever got a =
hance at you I'd even up things. :
iuh expect you quite so soon, though.
ay, We're about even, amt we?''
wen be little more than even q
men l tell your boss about your dog
oned impudence'- 7
guess you won't do that There's q
dozen OF us that get shaved at your
lop' You go to making any trouble h
nd you'll lose the lot of us. You'd bet Il
+ take your medicine like a little
-olng' arc you? Well, come again.
reat you all right next time. Chi
lgO Tribune. t.