The Saint Paul globe. (St. Paul, Minn.) 1896-1905, 1897-01-27

laughter. IL WdSGIDaC OF al AIlSIlCdu
woman living in, England, who first
skulked behind the walls 70 the Cow
ards Castle Of Anonymity and attacked
the American man in the columns of
one of London's leading dailies. Then
two or three weeks afterwards ap-
pended her signature to a article In
another paper, telling all about the
superiority" of the American woman
and the inferiority and utter unworth-
mess of the American man. Here, in
substance, is what John Bull read in
his morning paper:
1--WE, the American women, are hand
some, stylish, clever, fascinating, too
lovely for words and altogether to be
desired. But, alas, we cannot say as
much for the American men, who are
so far below us that they are absolute
ly unfit to marry us. American men are
the most elemental race of men in civil
lization, and their two leading char
acteristics are money greed and SEN
suality. The only place in the world
where we can find men who are phys
ically and Intellectually fit to mate with
us is England. Therefore, dear John
Bull, we come to you by the scores and
by the hundreds! You are so sensible,
so intelligent, SO healthy and so whole
some! You live a clean, outdoor life,
and you love sport better than women!
You are infinitely superior to your Brit
ish womankind, just as we are superior
to our 'hodge-podge' American man
kind. 1t is not meet that you should
wed the English woman-she is so far
below you. The American woman is
your true mate, your very affinity, John
Bull! Marry her, and then behold, all
the world will point toward you and
exclaim: Mark the perfect man."
Now, as 1 said before, honest John
Bull was at first staraled out of his
usual equanimity. He felt somewht
suspicious when he saw himself so
gloWinghly depicted in such flattering
terms by an American woman. 1T must
pc she's making game of me- he re-
nected; pure satire and sarcasm"
But after while the funny side of
the thing struck him, and then he
laughed, and he's laughing STILL 1t
may be that some Of his laughing is
done up his sleeve, but he's laughing
just the same. John Bull has a sense
of humor, although itsm may be true that.
as Mr.. Depew has SO aptly put it, the
humorous aspect of things travels to
him by freight. He has an excellent
opinion Of himself, but he appreciates
the fact that he has a few shortcom-
1ngs, and no one knows better than he
that IN some of the points at issue he
IS not able to come up to the high
standard of the American man.
Size by side with this American
Woman's arraignment of her country
woman let me quote the opinion of one
OIL the most courteous and liberal mind
Ell Eng1shmen, Sir Edwin Arnold:
An American woman?" he said,
sm1lingly, coming toward me and ex-
tending his hand, when, shortly after
my arrival in England, I called to in
terVleW him. Let me congratulate
you! 10 be an American woman should
mean to be happy. Somehow I always
think Of happiness as being the neces-
sary state of the American woman.
what Is there that she needs and has
not got! The laws Of her country seem
TO nave been framed for her express
benefit, and if there is one thing more
than another for which she should be
thankful it is for the American man
VINO has made those laws All! those
American meni When 1 was in your
contrary could not help smiling when
l heard them boast that they lived in
a republic where each man was a king
unto himself, acknowledging no other
sovereign! Why, America is an unlinl-
1ted monarchy! The American woman
sits on the throne, an absolute queen,
and the American man is her humble,
obed1ent and contented subject!''
THE AMERICAN AND THE ENG
LISHMAN.
70 make an important comparison
between the American man and the
English man it is necessary to- go back
to their childhood. almost to their very
birth. In the English household the
boy baby is a far more important fac
hn ic in hn
hold. Surprising, in the English nur-
sery. there is a boy baby and a girl
baby, and both infants happen to cry
for the same plaything, the boy baby
generally gets 1t, and as he grabs it
in his chubby fist and ceases his
Yoctferous cries there is a certain look
upon his determined little face which
says, II ought to have it, because I'm
the man! So it is throughout his
childhood and boyhood. The girl baby
is treated kindly enough, perhaps, but
she's not looked up to" as is her
brother. The little girl is not dressed
nearly as pretty as the boy. English
rage have little attention paid to. their
wardrobe, but the eostuming Of the
boy is a matter for grave and careful
attention. With shis perfect fitting
trousers, his hobby Elton jacket and
collar, gold headed stick and shining
silk hat, he is certainly a smart little
specimen Of humanity, and when he
walks out with his little sister he puts
her ''in the shade"
And in America? What about the
boy baby?
my son." says the American father
Or mother, you must give in to your
little sister! Give her your jumping
frog and your mechanical polar bear
Let her have the biggest half Of your
apple, and don't murmur If she wears
the prettiest sash ribbon and has a
little more money spent upon her than
we spend upon you. Give in to your
little sister-because she's the lady!'
So the boy baby 'gives in and when
be grows up he keeps. on "giving in"
and it is in just this particular that 1t
seems to me lies one Of the chief DIFF
ferences between American men and
English men. The American man will
give I'M and the English man will
not. The American man can be cOaXed
and cajoled and reasoned with by
women, I mean, Of course The En-
glishman cannot. His John Bull stub
bcrnness makes him "set in his ways"
Some of those ways Of his are very
nice, in which case one doesn't mind
his being "set" in them, but whether
or not his ways are the right ways, he's
set in them just the same Now, the
American man may have strong opin-
ions, too. He may know he's right and
try to go ahead, but let a woman coax
him, scold at him or, cry at him-par-
ticularly the latter+and he has a pleas
ant way Of giving In ooh, well, If
you will have it 50, why have 1t sov'
he says. Whats the difference hun
dred years from now, any way?"
But shall we coax an Englishmar,
cry at him to get our womanly ways?
Great heavens, non From that magni-
flcent height of hisebenign countenance
looks down upon US, with something Of