Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
pIsConDANT BELLIES.

d mony OF the universe and vexing IN
s life OF the Governor of that State.
d One OF these is Miss Richardson ant
o the other Is Miss Bradley. Both are
/. young and charming. and, therefore. al
n the moro capable OF doing mischief. The
d basis OF the trouble Is another she-a
|, United States war-vessel, soon to be
$ launched at Newport News and to be
{ called Kentucky
n According TO one newspaper correspond
{ ent Miss Richardson persuaded Secre-
| tary Herbert to name the vessel Ken
t lucky" According to another. equally
, reliable, or unreliable the name OF Ken
| lucky had been fixed upon by the Sec
rotary OF the Navy ere Mr.. Herbert ever
met or was bewitched by the lovely Miss
, Richardson.
However that may be- It seems to be
admitted that Mr.. Herbert agreed that
Miss Richardson might christen the ves-
sell A news item to that effect was soon
started opt upon its rounds and in due
course Of time reached the utmost parts
Of the dark and bloody hunting-grounds
Of old Kaintuck. Nor was any murmur
Of discomfort heard. 1t being agreed that
| Miss Richardson was all that a Ken
lucky sponsor should be. And her popu-
larity was much enhanced by the fact,
which was promptly made known, that
she intended to repudiate the custom of
breaking a bottle of champagne upon
the deck Of the vessel. and meant to use
instead Of the effervescing French liquid
bottle OF good, old, substantial Bour-
bon county whiskey. True, there was a
remonstrance heard from several Ken
lucky gentlemen that IL was shame to
waste so much good whiskey; but an
explanation was forthcoming that it was
to be a libation to Neptune, and that
Neptune expected the best in the land.
and so all objection on that score was
waived.
That point safely passed, the satisfac-
ton of Miss Richardson and the State
Of Kentucky was complete.
But, alas! one of the results Of the
disastrous presidential election of 1896
was that Secretary of-the- Navy Herbert
was ousted from office. The present
Washington authorities either knew no
thing about Mr.. Herberts arrangement
with Miss Richardson, or held that she, |
as well as Mr.. Herbert, was functus Of |
ficio, for they proceeded to arrange with |
Governor Bradley for another christener |
Now 1t happens that Governor Brad
ley has very pretty daughter with the
appropriate name of Christine), and it
also happens that she was induced by
"Vox Populi" and other importunate clti-
zens to become a candidate for the po-
sition of christener. But the appoint
ment being in her fathers hands, and 1t
being supposed that he wanted back
ing" numerous petitions were circulated
and signed, imploring him to lay aside
his modesty and appoint his daughter.
And the Governor, beguiled by the pc
ttioners. and, no doubt, coaxed and
by the female members Of his
family, and not knowing the trouble
that he was going to brew, yielded, and
appointed his daughter.
To this yielding of the stern father.
Miss Richardson and numerous OF her
friends promptly objected. Among other
things, they pointed out that the petit
lions had been circulated through some
If the gallant young colonies of the Gov
srnor's stan. on the other hand, Cover
Tor Bradley is understood as declaring
hat he had no information-no "official
we suppose-as to the ar
angement between Mr.. Herbert and Miss
richardson.
And so there is a great quarrel be-
ho hafr nd
Governor Bradley. no doubt, wishes that
10 had never had anything to DO with
he matter. Nor is the situation i'm :.
roved by the publication of the fact
hat Miss Bradley is Of a Republican
amily while Miss Richardson is of
democratic family
Interviews have been given out freely
y each side, and very warm ladylike 1
,ords have passed. The result of all v
MS is that not only is the Kentucky ad- W
Illustration embarrassed, but the trou-
lie is disturbing Secretary Long, also. la
Ir. Long succeeded Mr.. Herbert in Of do
&c, and may not have known anything
the arrangement that Mr.. Herbert
ad made. 1t is but charitable to sup
|
that any one holding his III
Ugh office could be mean enough to GUST in
Democratic belle to make place for a
epublican belle. 10
Our rule of conduct is not to interfere
womens quarrels-feeling ourselves,
deed, no match for one, much less 10
yo-but we desire to say that If this We
ere dispute between two Kentucky &c
lonels instead of between two Ken re-
cky bellies we should propose TO set ,
, it by primary election. We would 10,
we the voting by Australian ballot. 80
I'd on one ballot we should have en-
emized a bottle of frothing champagne,
d on the other a modest bottle Of old sta
,urbon whiskey. This done, we should tel
willing TO submit the case to the peo-
, of Kentucky without further argu- /
mt a
Most of the sky-scrapng buildings In
wv York have been erected upon con-