davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Katrina,
FOr the DiSnatch-

| tor the Dtspatch)
Katrina, you can found it oud
OF yet my heart dit holt you,
When sometimes it would be my n.oul
Would oben oud to scold you,
Your lofe would look your eyes oud ub
| Und makes me feel so meaner
| Dot l would shnuggle in your arms
| Ish dot not so, Katrina?
Sometimes der morning dock me way
/ Nit vrowns yust like der vetter,
Und NIT my lankwage | would say
I've don'd come back together"
But when der shutdown baints der yes,
Nit ylowers like verbana,
Der doorway found me always in
Ish dot not so, Katrina?
Und Of id wasn't SO. Gem nights
When sangerbunds would dock me,
Und in some vaterland delights.
Und voaming peer would cook me,
When sunrise dit got ub, und birds
Would sing some gavatina,
Who vas i'd in der hallway down?
Sayl VINO vas dot Katrina?
Ach Why, 1t should vorgotted been-
Der lofe dot vonce dit bound us?
Ii vas too shdrOng enough to vean
Der Sweetness vrom around us,
Und yust der same ash when IL vas
We cad der vilopena,
So will i'd wefer shdop to be-
Humph! Aind 1t so, Katrina?
IND When der hair ish bait, und feet
Vas noting use for walking,
Der beebles dot would shance TO meet
Where you ind me vas talking
Would dink, der way our vorts would
sound,
Dot Gupld's goncerdina
Vas blaying always i'm our hearts
Won't dot been so. Katrina?
WADE WHIPPLE.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
CUBAN AUTONOMY.

Information has reached Washington
from Habana to the effect that the or.
gan of the Autonomist party OF
the island has issued formal
circular, declaring in behalf of the
Cuban Autonomists, that they are
satisfied with the plan of Cuban auto
nomy now extended and declaring fur
Their that there remains no reason for
continuing the fight In the field The
circular closes with a strong appeal TO
the men in arms to return to the peace
full homes of their regenerated father
land.
If the fighting Autonomist heed this
appeal, another blow will have been
struck jingoism in this country, and an
additional reason Will have been afforded
why Congress should "go slow in inter-
fering further in the Cuban matter.
And it is not altogether unreasonable
TO suppose that the appeal will be heed
cd to a considerable extent Numbers
of Cuban Autonomists who have partici-
pated actively with the insurgents in
the field. were driven by Weylersm and
against their better judgment 10 make
common cause with the element in Cuba
that is struggling for absolute indie
pendence. However, that the organ of
the Autonomists should issue such a cir
cular evidences that influential leaders
OF the party who have not Joined the
Revolutionary forces believe. not only
that the days Of Weylerism are over
but that Spain is at last sincere in Of
fering autonomy. These facts, coupled
with the remembrance that after the
long rebellion Blanco did all in his power
10 keep faith touching the reforms then
offered. are, It would seem, calculated
10 win back many original Autonomists
10 the policy Of solving the Cuban ques-
ton by the autonomy plan.
In that event. as IS easy to under
stand, the cause Of absolute independence
would suffer seriously in respect, both
OF material and moral support. So. we re-
peat. Congress would do wen TO Ego
slow" In interfering further In the mat
ter-at least. until the new programme
shall have been tested, and it shall have
been proved that the majority of the
more intelligent Cubans viii not be salts !
fed 20 1--we under the Sagasta pro- |
gramme. Even II It be true as claimed |
by the Cuban annexatlonists In this |
country. that II is only a question OF |
time when annexation Will become an |
accomplished fact. the United States, as |
has been wisely remarked, would have
all to gain and nothing to lose by allow
Ing the island to prepare for annexation
BY going through a season of autonomy |
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Of Mr.. Bankhead. 1t says. among Other

VI wi. bankneaos IL says ahohs os"S'
| things:
"Mr. Bankhead was pioneer OF
pioneers. He loved the still woods and
the solitude of UNEMPLOYED regions. He
was full Of that corc'uering instinct
which has made the Anglo-Saxon race
the colonizing force Of the age. He wac
a mighty hunter and an unerring shot.
Even In his old age, when too feeble TO
walk, his sons would assist him to the
woods and leave him beneath some large
tree. There he would sit and watch for
squirrels. He could not see the little
animals. but he knew where they were
by their motions. He was never mis-
taken and never missed shot.
Mr.. Bankhead was remarkably hand
some. He was 6 feet Q inches high, and
his well-knit figure always commanded
attention. He had a straight nose, and
gentle, kindly eyes On the Randolph
side OF the house he was descended from
the Indian Princess Pocahontas. His
love OF free. outdoor life may have
been an Inheritance from this far-away
ancestress.
The story of John Warner Bankhead
was cultivated man. He was graduated
at the University OF Virginia. He loved
books, yet he loved nature better. He
was type OF the old-school gentleman,
fast disappearing In these days OF COM
mercial enterprise. His was a happy.
well-rounded life.
John Warner Bankhead took time to
live"
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
A RELICOF THE PAST
Surgical Operations for the Cure Of
Piles and Rectal Diseases No
Longer Necessary. .
A Medical Discovery which Will
Change the Treatment Of All
Such Diseases.

| 1t has long been thought not only By
some physicians but by people In general
| that the common painful and exceedingly
annoying trouble. piles. was practically
incurable by any other means than a
surgical operation, and this belief has
been the cause OF years Of needless SUI
fering, because OF the natural dread OF
surgical operations.
There are many salves, ointments, and
similar remedies on the market which
afford some relief in cases OF piles, but
the Pyramid Pile Cure is the only pre-
paration so far introduced that can be
reliably depended upon to cure TO stay
cured every form OF itching. bleeding, or
protruding piles.
Mrs. NJ c. Hinkley, OF col Mississippi
street, Indianapolis. was told by her ply
sicians that nothing but n surgical opera
ton, costing between 800 and $500, could
cure her, as she had suffered for Is years:
yet, even in such n case as hers, the
Pyramid Pile Cure accomplished a com
plete cure. She says: II knew an opera
ton would be death TO me, and tried the
Pyramid with very little hope, and II is
not to be wondered at that / am so en-
thusiastic in its praise"
Mr.. ID. F.. Reed, Of South Lyons, Mich,
saws / would not take $500 and be placed
back where l was before / used the
Pyramid Pile Cure, l suffered for years.
and it is now eighteen months since |
used 1t, and not the slightest trace of the
trouble has returned.
The Pyramid Pile Cure is sold by nearly
all druggists at so cents and 81 per pack
age. and as ii contains no opium cocaine
or other poisonous drug, can be used with
perfect safety.
No one need suffer from piles In any |
form who will give this excellent remedy |
a trial. Send for book on cause and cure |
Of piles, sent free by addressing Pyra- |
mid Drug Company Marshall Mich. Qor- |
merly Albion, Mich).
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
THE RICHMOND DISPATCH.
by THE DISPATCH COMPANY

The DAILY DISPATCH is delivered to
snhsor,hers nj FIFTY CENTS per
month payable to the carrier weekly or
monthly. Mailed at IS per annum; s.
for six months; $3.50 for three months
90 cents for one month. Price per copy
cents.
The WEEKLY DISPATCH at 81 per
aanum.
The SUNDAY DISPATCH at $50 per
annum. or IS cents for six months.
subscriptions In all cases payable IN
advance, and no paper continued after
the expiration Of the time paid for. Send
post-office money order. check, or regis
tered letter. Currency sent by mail VIII
be at the risk Of the sender. subscribers
wishing their post-ofiee changed must
give their old as well as their new post
Office. Sample copies free.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
A Football Beneficiary.

Jester: Well, don't suppose there Is a
subject that can be named on which
public opinion so widely differs as this
very question OF football. You. for in
stance. are fierce in your condemnation
of 1t, and only a moment ago was con-
versing with another friend who as
strongly commended it-in fact. he said
it had benefited him more than anything
in his experience.
Quester: The man must be a fool.
Jester: No he's not; he's a doctor.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Proved His Endurance.

Surgeon Ito patient who has called to
have an operation performed: Well. how
do you feel? Do you think l had better
give you anything to help you through
the ordeal?
Patient: Oh, no; 1 guess I've got the
nerve to stand It. / attended that anna
teur concert last evening and survived
your violin solo all right.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

The Pennsylvania railroad is expert
menting with view to reducing the
time of its limited express between New
york and Chicago to twenty hours The
experimental train LEFT Pittsburg on
Thursday at 6;5S A. NJ, and arrived In
Chicago at o'clock p. NJ. making the
iSS miles in COZ minutes. The same train
left Chicago at A. NJ. reaching Pitts
burg at 6:z5 p. NJ. in 565 minutes, making
the eastward run thirty-seven minutes
faster than the western run, whios
breaks all previous records. "Pennsy"
continues to be leader among railroads
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Not mt All Natural.

Mrs. Hunt: All, Mrs. Blunt, 1 regret to
hear OF the death Of your husband. Did
he die a natural death?
Mrs. Blunt No; he dropped dead OF
heart disease.
Mrs. Hunt: Why, that's natural death,
isn't it?
Mrs. Blunt: Not for him; 1t wasn't at all
natural for him to do anything in a
hurry,
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Not Her, Indeed.

Mr.. Friendman: Don't go away from
home, old man, with any such feelings
as that towards your wife. Some day
she will go to join the silent majority,
and then you will feel sorry for having
spoken as you did.
Mr.. Harrier: What My wife join the
silent majority? She couldn't stand 1t; it
would kill her If she had to be silent for
Just one little minute.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

They are training In the Reichsrath, we
can swear,
For the tocsin Of their practice rends the
air.
Till there echoes from Vienna.
Such suggestions OF Gehenna,
That we know they've got hot time
over there.
petrate,
And the pugilistic form of their debate,
And the fractures appertaining
To the same. that they are training
For the football championship Of ninety
eight.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Scoring n Scenter.

Mr. Rubicund: called, Mr.. Oldhead, to
ask your advice. / am anxious to get a
government position, and am anxious to
know where TO apply.
Mr.. Oldhead contemplating Mr.. RS
nasal effulgence): should say. my dear
sir, that you would be useful in the Sig
nal Service.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

The bicentenary OF tho reopening OF St
Paul's Cathedral Gondon) was celebrated
Thursday afternoon with splendid
Masonic service. Though the present
building is but 200 years Old. the site has
been occupied by houses OF worship from
time immemoriaL The New York Tribune
states that Christopher Wren was OF
Inc opinion that there had been a church
en- the spot. built b. Christians In the
s'Hs OF tho Romans and demolished by
Wy pagan saxons. This church is be-
ssssa 70 have been restored by King
~''As'psF' "a about the year eio. and 10
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Deserve Concentration.

Were you at Yawper's concert last
EVENING""
81 was"
"Must have been a great affair. heard
that several hundred people were turned
away
II wish / knew who they were; I'd go
around and congratulate them"
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
At the Zoo,

Dude Cat the hyena's cage): All, keepah!
1 WEAKLY don't care to bothah you, don't
yer know, but cawn't you inform me
what sawt of beast we have heah?
Keeper: Certainly sir; that is the
laughing hyena. (Sotto voce) And
don't blame him, either.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Fits the Cnse,

Clipper: l suppose you know that Mixer
has started a new cafe on the corner?
Upper: No; 1 hadn't heard Of 1t.
Clipper: Well, he has; he calls 1t the
Counterfeit"
Upper: The Counterfeit?
Clipper: Yes; hard to pass, you know.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Greatness.
Cincinnati Enquirer

Cincinnati Enquirer)
which is the greater city, New York
or Chicago?" asked the teacher
The little boy lately from Boston arose
and replied: New York is the larger. but
greatness, as SUCH cannot be truthfully
assumed to appertain to either of them.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Doubts.
Cincinnati Enquirer.)

ICIncInnatl EnquIrerD
There is some mistake" said the re-
turned Klondiker, as he crawled from the
box-car, about the fabulous amount of
gold in Alaska. AS to there being on
amount of fabulous gold-well, :hat is
different
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

The recent blanket of snow over Kan
sas was of great benefit TO the wheat crop
of that State. which goes into the winter
season, it is reported, In better condition
than for ten years.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Mr.. Asbury Peppers.
Cincinnati Enqulrer)

NOIItIHIdII ENqUITtf.D
"'At eve,'" read the poetic boarder
who will inflict his compositions on the
rest Of the victims of homelessness, ".At
eve the cows came lowing home"
Are you sure" asked Asbury Peppers,
that they were not hieing homer
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

Cicero has said that IMAM was born
for two things-thinking and acting" II
would elevate the stage IL the average
actor would be mindful of this initial
requirement.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

The victim of a shampoo is willing L
admit that 1t calls for a good deal o
head work.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
No Wonder.

That's an odd-looking chair, and yet
your husband says he can get sleep in
that when he can get it in no other chair
in the house,
Eyes. You see, it's a chair I had made
for him out of an old church pew"
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

by declaring that Cape Charles is town
that has not even a public road leading
to It. AS we have said. the fight over
the removal question promises to be
lively.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Taught by Experience.

tnCdSO 1rlDune.)
Tuffold Knutt: Wot are we goin' to do to
celebrate the day? Wash yer face?
Mosely Wraggs: Nav. done that last
Thanksgivin' and wuz bit by four dogs
durin' the day. They didn't reco'nze me-
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
No Need To.

Pittsburg ChrOnicle)
THE Austrian Reichsrath ought to pass
a riot act" remarked Halket.
"A body which can perform the riot act
does not need to pass one," replied Hi
land
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

We don't know anything about the
language of Mars, but assume it to be q
sort Of mother-tongue.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

A conference is soor to be held In New
York TO secure the enactment OF laws
bringing primary elections under State
supervision. That is the trend every
where.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

The man who has no faith in a future
state doesn't take into consideration our
territorial resources.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

The Eastern Shore Herald meets the
contention OF the Cape Charles Headlight
that the county COURTHOUSE of Northamp-
ton should be removed to Cape Charles
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

Two OF the biggest banks in Chicago
the Union National and the Hide and
Leather National-have been consolidated
under the appropriate title Of the Hrst-
named institution,
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

The athlete never gets really tired until
he runs for office.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

1t is generally conceded that the actor''
carriage is decidedly STACEY.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

It's funny, but the more eye-openers
a man takes. the more blind he is to
his own good.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

1t is said one in ten of the people Of
Hawaii. which We are about to annex, is
a leper That doesn't look very healthy.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

Some men attain influence by the way
Of affiuence.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Suits to Order.
$3.50.

Some Of these goods formerlv
sold for $50 suit. We have 100
many goods on hand. We off,
you big inducements to help D,
turn our stock into money.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

All letters recommending candidates
for Office must be paid for to insure their
publication. This is long standing rule
of ours.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
Great-Grnndson of Jererson's

The man who truly loves doesn't "falr'
in love.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

All letters and kilograms must be ad-
dressed to THE DISPATCH COMPANY.
Rejected communications will not be
returned.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

Resolutions OF respect to deceased
members passed by societies, corpora
tons, associations, or other organiza-
tions will be charged for as advertising
matter.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05

UPTOWN OFFICE. BROAD-sTREET
PHARMACY, 5l9 EAST BROAD
STREET.
MANCHESTER OFFICE, 1903 HULL
STREET.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
ADVERTISING RATES.
HALE INCH OR LESS.

vance C25 words or less)....'..''''' 20
Above rates are for every DAY OF au-
yertisements running consecutiveiy.
Reading notices in feading-matter type
Eve lines or less. 81; in nonpariei' leaoed'
1--WE lines or less. 70 cents.
card OF rates for more space furnished
on application.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-05
ONE WORD.

observation-disclosures 5, 1897.
New-York tribune., 1897-01-10

Pacific Railroad, when as boy Of twelve ne
earned his first wages driving span OF mules.
He did his work well and when this Job was
finished he worked on farm In the mean time
saving some money. Then he learned telegrapny
and worked for the Western Union Telegraph
Company on the old overland stage and tele-
graph line running to Montana. After several
years of this work he employed by the
Wells-Fargo Express Company as agent. Then
he went into the newspaper business and started
the daily. known The InterMountan OF
Butte City, Mont. with which he is still con-
nscted. Then lie became Alderman. then Mayor.
then several times member Of the Legislature.
and last year he elected to the Senate of
the United States"
who is he?" asked two three listeners at
once
But there is something more and better than
all the rest" continued the Senator. not needing
the interruption. 1.-TWO years ago he built one
OF the handsomest houses in Butte City and put
that blessed old mother in it,
There little pause Of unbroken silence.
then as il suddenly aware that he had not grati-
fled the curiosity of the interested group, the
Senator added:
"Oh. who is he? Well. he is still young man.
probably the Youngest in the Senate. for he is
barely forty -fve-Lee Mantle. the junior Sena-
tor from Montana"
New-York tribune., 1897-01-10

in architectural language bm, If only onern Amnr
could return and take glimpse of the interior
ana obtain a conception of the luxuries that moo moo
ern invention art and taste have supplieh shc
would disclaim all right to having this Aladdin
like palace called after her name. The extensive
stables and kennels of the Hanna properly pear
witness to the admiration for those wG best irend+
of man the horse and the dog, which il eVldentls
shared by all the members of the llama iamliy,
ID r. Hanna drives the finest span IN the western;
Reserve and was the inspiration OF the Inaugural
Horse Show OF cleveland: which attracted eied'
crowds to that city last November. .
Mrs NJ. A. IIannas pleasure In entertainlns III
her handsome home Is shared by her husband
There is no doubt he Is hest beaming with pleas
ure and as sincere he Is warm IN MS welcome
of his guests and his greatest delight Is 10 see
his friends about his table.
During the recent campaign many distingusned q
visitors were welcomed to the house parties which
the delightful favored situation OF the Hanna resi-
dence makes particularly ENJOYABLE IN snmmer, ~ J.,
goes without saying that Major Mckinley ana ms
wife were among the welcomed guests, ana tnat
there the Major found not only chahss oi sJe,s
but freedom from the reception or delegatlons.
which. doubtless aided him greatly in keeping his
health and cheerful spirits TO the close OF the
memorable campaign. A., =, ~
The Hanna mansion ana that or Mrs NJ i
Herrck. In Cleveland. Mrs. Mckinney VISITS more
frequently than any other homes, thosc ol Her
IA hardly excepted.
New-York tribune., 1897-01-10
DTSTRTBT TING THE MAIL.
. Youths Companion.

From The Youths Companion.
ANY one who has known what II Is 10 walt day
after ay I'm some out of he-world nook for letters
which were all the time safely reposng IN some
neglected corner of "A sleepy postoice Fan appreci-
ate the story that is told of Lord olseley by Mr.
Nourse who was with Her Majesty's forces
through the SOudan campaign. .
At Korti Nourse went into the postonlce 10 look
for some letters The postmaster was a native ana
not much used to handwriting. lie made a super
fcial examination of "A big pile OF letters and papers
and said there was nothing Tor the applicant
Nourse asked 10 see the pile Of letters and while
he was looking them over man with nothing "a "a
designate his rank came into the office. lie took In
the situation At q glance
Lets clear this thing out he said.
They iumped on the counter and proceeded "a
clear II OUT by first bundng out the postmaster
Then they began careful examination OF the
postofice and found ii congested with mail for the
army They searched every nook and Granny
throwing the letters for each regiment into diff
ferent pile. and heaping up all the newspapers In
the centre of the room. Then they went through
each pile and separated II into companies. Before
night every letter In camp and distributed
and the next day the papers were out.
Nourse did not know the name OF his companion
i'm the benevolent deed. and when he asked the
answer was They call nre Charlie
Some time after Nourse found II necessary TO see
the commandant and sitting near the tent to which
he had been directed he his companion of the
postofice . .,, =,
''Hullo Chare,' he said. I'm looking for the
commandant Where shall | find him.
Well" said Charlie. you won nave to look far
I'm the commandant. Come Inside and have bit
to eat and drink"
II WAS Lord WOlseley.