The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1897-05-06

Brick-Top; udders, Billed Carrots; he an
swered roll-call tub BeiIer," and he made
me call him Mistuh Jo"
Mistuh 10 wuz de very incest kind of q
man. He cud lick anybody in de regiment
he beat de Majah playin pokah, and once he
throwed suffer in de ribber. Every body
liked him. Dey treated him mitey civil
I've often herd de Kurnel hisself say to
him:
'Beiler, you need rest. Let me run dis
regiment awhile my ownsef You go tub
de guard-house fer 10 days"
And Mistuh 10 always went Sum times
hit tux ez many ez five men tub. take him,
but Mistuh 10 always went. De Kurnel
wuz de kind OBJ man dat can't bear tub be
disappointed.
Mistuh 10 wuz awful good tub me. He
rugged me out in a suit OBJ blue cloze Jest
like him; learned me my letters so I cud
read de labels when wuz helpin de sutler,
and swipe de brandy peaches; showed me
how to turn jack from de bottom, and ring
IN cold deck on dem low-down teamsters
who WIZ a-skinnin me; started me in de
cookin perfeshun, and wouldn't let nobody
lick me but hisself
You've bin fadder tub me, Mistuh Jo,' y
l SEE tub him one day, in de fool-my-
nashun OBJ NAH gratitood.
DE blazes / hev," sezzee "Hit must
hev bin de darkest hour oh an eklips wen /
wuz fadder tub you. Eff Pm ebber ladder
tub anything, I want hit tub be about a
milyun times lighter'n you is.n
Dis refruns tub my complekshun WIZ de
unkindest ting dat Mistuh 10 ebber sed tuh
me.
One day, wen we wuz in dem woods
T. IL
tub take de camp-kittle down tub de kirk,
fill hit wild watch, and glib his cloze good
bllln. dun got de camp-kittle all right,
and de watch, and de cloze. Den linked
round fer sum stones tub sot de kittle on
same ez seed NAH nanny do. But, eff
you rekolleks, dey ant no stones in all dat
country. Muffin but sand and mud. and
feas and ticks, yaller dorgs, and ornery, POI
white trash.
Bime-by I see couple OBJ big cannon
bawls not fur away. Huntin round, done
found anudder
Dey's jest de t'ings," SEE tub mahself,
SEE |. Dey's iuhn, and dey won't burn !;
and dey's done bin shot, so dere's no noah
hahn in dem.n
Dat shows how fool niggeh will sum-
times make believe he's reezonin out a
match, wen he's only fxin up ded-fall
tub nok his own swelicd he'd often hisself
Well, l dun rolled NAH cannon-bawls
close tuhgedder, sot nah kittle full oh coze
on, and started right peart fire undeh hit.
I'd bin tub de tent tub git sum sope, and
wuz a-startin bak, wen wun OBJ dem cannon
bawls bust intuh a milyun pieces, wild de
powerfullest crash and bang you'll heah till
Judgment Day, wen de hebbens and de
airth cum tuhgedder. I see de camp-kittle
and Mistuh JOS shirts and drawers 60 sailin
up abuy de tree-tops intuh de clouds I
wuz nokt fiat, and jest had sens enuf left
tub pull dek oh cards outen NAH pokkit
and fr0w dem away afore I died wild dem
on me.
Den anudder cannon-bawl bust intuh ten
milyun pieces, wild powerfuller smashin
and bangin dan de udder. One of de
pieces cut off de limb oh an oak Jest abuv
me ez big as NAH leg. Hit fell on de small
Oh nah bak, and bent NAH backbone like q
letter s, and / nebber did git de kinks
straitened out agin. Anudder piece flew
troo de Chaplain's tent, who wuz a-shavin
hlsself, and skeered him so dat he razored
a piece often his own eah, and run out on de
parade-ground, and yelled:
Kurnei, deres masked battery opened
onto US. Let's retreat to wunsn
While l WIZ jest a-dyin de udder cannon
bawl bust intuh hundred milyun pieces,
wild de wust roar OBJ any. De bugles begin
a-callin, Fall in" I thought WIZ really
dead, and Gabriers trumpet wuz a-blowin
De Kurnel and all de men run up, and
see de hole in de ground big enuf to bury
a mule, and NE layin dere whiter'n ghost,
and DRAWN NAH last mortal bref. For a
long time dey couldn't understand what he'd
happened. Den dey all set up de greatest
latin and hollerin, and Mistuh 10 he frowed
de limb often me, and stood me up, and glib
me lickin wild his ramrod. Hit felt mitey
good, tell you. wuz powerful glad tub
hab anything left oh me tub lick.
AFTER dat nebber fooled wild no mo-
cannon-bawls dat hedn't bin cracked and
DER kernels dun TUX out.