davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Decorah-posten., 1897-04-02
Cattle. Wont.

Si bar iaur bopt en- lang cg 'trens 9inter
Der pna Stcoet. Sen b%egDnote i Nooember,
o. ioa9 - ben 23os Marts - er bet en- rDs
oenoe Snciorm. Set bar uo9eululoe bra
fra Miotrn ai September % til Slutten al
Sanuur; men ira Den Sio og I'll M bar
@oopeirsoa9suc iuuoclig life oGret nlange.
Smiplertio bar bet life 9iro % geir, ie8
trnits at ppparte ureo, men leg sniter at be-
rettc liot ON ct Sscsfulo, iom inotrai / ocnne
Menisbso ioits Iinttr.
Zen Iiopoe er Nels q. Nelien, isot
@arran, Ncrors Sronobiems Imt, Ncrge,
Den 2loe Sttobcr 1852 az TorClorere Nlers
amber Iilien % Suitru Sbals Ssr9ins, ieot
@ranoe. Soan uppanpreoe til Nmerita | Is
Wars gloeren iamnlen meo i'm W(ooer; 6as
oeren bar nemlis rsiit ct Bar aar iicrpcien.
Sc boiatte is i 6illmort So, Wtinn,, boors
fra De / garst 1873 hptteoc til Reo 8iper
Salen, bpor DC to9 2ano / RGrbecen al eDen
Salitap. Ter blep ban ianlme Nar gift mco
piee Singer Sperieu ira SsuOre Auroals
preitesielO, Rcr8e.
Sc bar | otrcs 9Goteifab baot s gsrn,
bporai 7leoer, ben rloite ca. 10 % ben pngite
ca. 3 gar qarnel.
I 1888 reiitt De til Montunu, bpor be bar
leuet iosn. Sen giosor bar ~ioruoen in Sohs
itru ca Born TO Sntlsr, Martiu og anton
8rarot % en- Setter Sena bpiiooenoe her.
Noaren 1896 ~bsoDuote ban at islc fig life
ri0ti0 psl; men ban bar Dog cppc oS runot
uoopcr Sommcrer, iad ingeu trocoe, bet par
no%ocniombtIt 6are p~aaiGrpe; men oa bet Ieo
| I'D / Sttcbcr MATTE han tillengs, % oa ble0
Sage tiltalot. San buooe 'pst 2rge ipr os.
ioo, men cnt,n ban life foritoo Sp9oommen
eQsr alereoe oa pioitc, bet bar for tent, men
intet laqos, pco ri lille. Meu ban iunoe Oes.
prrrc iutet oisre for barn. Soan ia9oe, at
han feb al ct ubelbreosligt Wiaotonoe; ielo
en- Operation piloe life 9apue uogct. Smip.
lcrtio forourreocs ban lite roset uooocr &ss
ten: BET iaa snoog no, icm ON ban forbeores
bes en- Sip; men eiter Nptaar begDnote bet
iQien at gaa reooper, og ben 25oe Sanuar
oeoc ban, A gar 9ammel.
Set or Dog en- 5rsit Scrgen at oioe, at
ban baooe 6rso meo i'm @uo % git til ct
beore Qip, bopr bet par bans ~inoerlige gsu
% gnFe at iaa iamlss mso fine SiGre. Me=
nisbcoens t~roiaie SiGleisrgcr, s. e. Maos
fen, bcisott ham ina cite, ban baboe gluleo:
ming ctrtil (bau bar 5 ior7ieliss Steosr at
prroife paa 90 langt at reiie), og ban ia,
til flor 5rsit og Cpmuntrins baape for BAN
% 6amilien.
Zen Nfosoe blep ~be9raoet ben 2Soe I. M.
Taitor Maoicu raj ocspGrrs life bib til pc
srapelisr, iaa ben fOrretteoes at en- puitor
Smith fra Gaitle. Soan talte pafre os iuoz
trrnstno. Orb baaoe / Sicmmet os oeo @ras
ben. 2igfelget par fort % beitco baaoe al
Rorite % sllnerifancrc, Tom snfeoe at beoiis
ben tiGre gipsoe ben iioite 96re. pator ).
tG. Maoisn antom Suscu eiter os prGoiicce
ben paaislasnoe Ssnoas, bporpco ban c9iaa
benpttspe 9eilisbeOen % uotalte baaee trss
itenoe % iormanenoe Orb baaoe til ben isrs
oenoe Gnts % DC i~aocrlsie gsrn, iumt Den
spriss 6oriamlins.
geo famine 2eilisbeo inopisos ban osiaa
@rapplaoIcn. u. 8.
Decorah-posten., 1897-04-02
ara 9lmbnrnoaIe, 0iS.

= nor laaet en- ub Spnopspreit Der | Mes
o7'''a MI, lom beoocr Soposn, en- ouslie
"'a'o | NANCE Maaosr.
"''"'eIorentns er Der ftiftet for l9nse f.
y, 'S 0e bar Disos bper Maansb. Iu fo.
,. Ya'a oar Preiten meo paa Msost % talts
's"'"aI''Hoe Src til benz os itprfeoe Dem
NO'''asen0e, iaa at be psnote biem mel
n' 0''9daontuger. Ss bar siort airie,
nsn'0s III Qoosoopsabs, os til bet Wlaal er
p"''''i 'Ho itfe iua tibet alsreos; % en-
."'8ssaSe 6remtio bill Siis, at osIaa Der
D boa5el ~
N"'''''s sr BET, naar osiaa apiucerne ilaa,
.."'ll'n % lsfter / 5lci o. "itrioe, ION
pSl'' 0I'O Der bbsset ct siol.bus til en-
e.. 0mtrsnt 500, 90 bet fob iom en-
"'"''' 9oa Wurtn; men Wattsn til s.r
Decorah-posten., 1897-04-02
Elepa, IRIS.

zen liSt DARTS bapo. en- Gel 0enntr %
%''a az osn 75uariss Sisne Spuriou be.
li'''i at o~otrraie benos paa bcnoes @eburts.
g9. Se IamleOes i 6uist hos bcnbe Smoas
A''oa9 mtO oti iDlote aurpe, % be tom bcls
!" we %tonbGnotos meo Ssnipn til @apcr.
yNra' ole bnOoe foripnet is peo bet oels
"'''0' SorN, bolot e. g. Grieiion, ipm er
W. mto ben Dngite Satter, en- for anleoniu.
.' m'9't pasicnoe Sale, bppri ban aap ct
WI NHrlo5 al Den @amles aipsisrelie, iiGr
'''' Eano, bpor bun bar baot lit Si.m
.'oa 1852. Scrpaa bleb Der oplait ct Siat
1iaacfen.
S'''' 'ar en- meget bpsselis % opbpsseno.
-''''a'omit for ule, Tom osltos | ben.
q. 3.
Decorah-posten., 1897-04-02

l7oe hofltosn brandt. bet u.o tiolia ON
Worsensn, isrtnO noetn bar cYp,, o. bet Ct
os bltosr en- llst @1aos, bporltots Sloen
brso los, oa colt bar Rarbsoen Of bet pms
trent al. II pm 0aitsn os inssn Iare up,
oa9eoe. Set blir III, iaa fort FAB a~lliaeusl,
tbi bet par a%siurerei ior 5000.
Zen nGite Morseu, oa solicit ioriamlso.
fs paa grdnpitsoet for at optris oetunpttiee,
bleo Der 'trar giort GOrbsreoslisr til at op.
fsrs ct anest pan De iamme Niurs, cs be fam.
menialots etIPsos oesansnasnoe, bpOr be iam,
rnaoeoe ig os lasoe plantr, o9 Der tisrcs ollie.
reos paa De iornsone Wuttrialsr, boilist CT
pnattoe, oo Snten boloer paa at iorlaoe os
igitn ior osnne Sang, Os Barren bar alsrtDe
bc9Dnot at aanot.
q. q. Guoie.
Decorah-posten., 1897-04-02
Iasiage for 200 Nariioen

Or. qebmnnu / Berlin bar nplis
paaplit, at en- Sten ben usiprnte Sal
/ 8~erliuer. Wuipet, bulltsu er tasen
ira Nong Snubertbs SALADS | NlnIus,
ircmiilsr en- Ra5 aaebebanolluI. J
ct Tett Ter man bL. a. en- paa ct 2ete
uourott &rjger, pan buem en- anocu
iyrelaler ulsie 6aanogret, Der sitsr
Or. Gebmnnn. o. nnOre GP9ers Mt.
nrna life fan tpoe paa anoet eno en-
Wias UNDERSTANDING, iom uoiGrtes for
2,7OO Nar Uocn.
Decorah-posten., 1897-04-02
Ten farliNitc Spaoom

/ Serosu er, meuer Ir. 6.ouitoH. 3i'
rcttgr ior Suo5ip9saiplet I Goin9.
burgb, Suflueu5oen. Sloeu 1890, oa
oruue SD3oom ior GlUOr bssBuote at
berie | europa, bar SIuosiggoomme,
ipcelslt Od WslartOli, tiltaget en- iOr.
nroligsnOe Grab, tiger Or. Glouiion.
"Jufaeu5as8liteu" err, meuer ben bes
%tlsnote SlnosiD3et9Se, ben uirfiomite
EOeI9ggcr al NerUecucr9ten o9 6rems
brln9er al RerusiD3oommr, Tom man
i0r IIoen iienoer.
Decorah-posten., 1897-04-02
correspondence

"---,,r,,r uoen savn ga gsresi: iasss iife
&'rates N. be elir life snsana piennt InlSfi tie az
rrsf' s,a papu,t iii life bli5s cfientIigsict. NIB
si9ath''. rr,upe aptreipenberf su.cr bet, men
ri1.' . -a, bap, gapret % doyesien.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03
RECIPROCITY AND BRAZIL.

Blaine's Pan-American policy received
a hard backset by the Cleveland admin
istration. The way to do business with
the South American countries is
through reciprocity. In NO other way
can the advantages offered by Europe
be overcome, advantages in prices and
Of marine service. Blaine was states
man enough to see this and strong
enough to have the policy embodied IN
the original Mckinley bill.
What Mr.. Cleveland's destruction Of
the reciprocity system has done for our
trade interests with South America Is
vividly revealed in the case of Brazil.
The commerce between that country
and the United States in 1892 amounted
to S13333, 900 900, and this year it will fall
below SS4, 100000. The same shrinkage
is going on in our trade with nearly all
the other South American countries and
with Mexico. The whole record OF our
commerce with those nations under the
Cleveland policy is dismal story Of de-
cay and loss. The decline of the Brazil
ian trade is positively startling, and 1t
offers an unanswerable argument for
the immediate restoration Of the foster
ing policy under which 1t reaches the
splendid proportions which it enjoyed
five years ago.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03
THE LEAGUE At DETROIT.

The National Republican League
meets at Detroit, Michigan, July Is, II
and Is, the railroads all having grant
ed a one fara round trip. Ever since its
organization in 1857, the National Re
publican League of the United States
has kept it's Office open and its orga-
nizing and educating forces at work,
despite a hostile national administra-
ton on the one hand and a money panic
on the other. 1t has been the only po-
Etical organization representing Re
publican policies that has refused to
"shut up shop" The league is Opt
mistic and is now enjoying the fruits
of a victory won by Thrift over Shift
lessness, Honesty over Dishonesty, and
Intelligence over Ignorance In the
great campaign of 1896 the league play
ed no small part. Subordinating itself
to the Republican national committee
and quietly hewing to the line, it was
instrumental in turning the tide in sew
eral states. In the struggle for office
the league takes no part. 1t Is the
volunteer Army" Of the Republican
party. 1t backs no man for place. 1t
is not a breeder OF discord, neither does
it shelter the disappointed seeker after
patronage. 1t is close to the people.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

her husband was of opposite political
fahah; and today Lord Salisbury is
stronger because the trust and sympa-
thy of the court Is with him. He will
never willingly relinQuish that support,
and there will be no abdication against
his advice.
1t is said that Prince Albert when he
died exacted a promise from Queen
Victoria that she would never abdicate,
as he distrusted the character of the
Prince of Wales, his eldest son. This Is
hardly probable. The prince was still
in the hands of his tutors and not yet
of age when his father died. 1t is posi-
BILE that Albert Edward would have
been more of man if his mother had
relied more on him and taken him more
freely into her counsels. But the repu-
tation of a Prince of Wales is but a
poor indication of the sort of king he
will make Albert Edward is man OF
high education and extraordinary tact,
and the probabilities are that he will
turn out an excellent king.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03
THE BRITISH CROWN.

The other day a baby, the great
grandchild of Queen Victoria. celebrat-
ed its third birthday. The baby is a
boy, the son of the Duke of York, and
heir presumptiye TO the throne of Eng
land. four notches removed, he having
his father. his grandfather and his
great grandmother all standing between
him and the British crown. There will
be no more queens of England soon.
although that boy may be on the throne
In his early majority. His grandfather.
the present Prince OF Wales. has been
swift youth. But he is getting old
waiting for his mother to die or abdi-
cate. She has been in no hurry to do
either. and so the prince has been sober
Ing down. If he can hold out he may
be the making of a level-headed king
after all. That baby boys great grand
mother is old. his grandfather broken
down and his father inclined TO be
stitution from his mother, Princess May
of Teck. Ii is admitted by the British
Newspapers that the jubilee has told on
the nerves and physical condition of
Victoria. and that the reaction threatens
10 shorten her days. In all human
probability the Prince Of Wales will IT
40 distant day ascend the throne Of
England, and II is almost rs probable
that history will repest the old story
OF the accession Of Henry V, which Is
told by Shakespeare. lie VIII ther
throw aside his frivolous boon compan.
ions and call about him the ablest and
most serious men OF his realm for coun-
sellers. II is true thai under the British
constitution the monarch has no pOliu-
cal power; but his immense social
weight is great auxiliary 10 the party
with which the crowns sympathies lie.
Peel felt it so seriously that he tried TO
make the young queen dismiss one of
the women Of her bedchamber because
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03
Outlines of Oklahoma

Governor Barnes seems disposed to feed
the other fellows harmony with . bis
spoon.
Ell Reno but got his head down IN time to
escape being hit.
Joe McNeal and Jake Admire both put
up fine brand OF gorgeous neutrality in
that Ell Reno meeting.
The Flynn crowd seems TO be misnomer.
Flynn is in New York. while BIZ Grimes
" as at the throttle at FL Reno.
Some Of the time Harper Cunningham
had to work like a trooper. but he kept
the engine on the track all the time
DR.. Sutton Of Pawnee. who was the
Barnes Chairman al e. Reno is valuable
man and Barnes ought to remember him.
Harvest hands are wanted all over Okla
homa, yet tramps are to be seen daily
begging from house 10 house FOR something
TO eat.
Hester Of Kingnsher was present at FL
Reno as a delegate and got away with his
scalp intact, and never wants TO attend
another one.
For a while at El Reno Harper Cunning
ham had to hold the breach all by himself.
Then tie fellows found he was q fighter and
came forward to help him out.
TIE happ:est man in Oklahoma IL DIR.
Dean. Dean has been after Professor
Patriok's scalp q long time and he has j,
a, last. Patrick being now a fugitive.
There never was a convention in OkIaho-
ma where there was not at least one ex-
citing scene. It started away back with
the statehood conventions and has got 10
be habit
for harmony at Ell Reno. But ne hasn't
quite got those soft, white. tapering. waxen
fingers on the neck OF that United States
attorneyehip yet.
As Governor Barnes won his fight with
out the help Of all his appointees. that Is
all he can appoint, the boys should let up
on their remarks IN derosat.on OF Arkan-
saw. Arkansaw IS a good state.
Governor Barnes had il his own way at
e Reno, by 6 good deal Of hard pulling,
and II must have occurred to him at the
tine that it was only year ago that they
walked on his form in Logan county.
Colonel Bradley at FL Reno yelled with
al, the Kingfisher crowd at his coat-tails:
Let US walk out OF here and let 'em
Barnes mem go to hell" But the King
fisher crowd never does walk out. II isn't
built that way.
The Oklahoman Of Oklahoma City roasts
the Choctaw road for its gate system which
keeps people waiting in the sun. The
gate system is all right Perhaps the
trouble is with slow and over-cautious
man at the turn-stile.
Frank Greer at FL Reno undons himself
like an extension telescope and gave .
short, sweet talk on harmony. Frank is
all right. The only trouble with Frank Is
that he didn't make that private financial
platform OF his stick last fall.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

The prince OF Wales and the princess went
TO 10 Chamberiain's house TO reception.
but the crush was so great tina: they dove
back home A special dispatch to the
Eagle from London says that the princes
private reason for leaving was that he car
red several eggs IN his pocket as a presen,
TO Mr.. Chamberlain
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03
Nobody Ever saw Two.
Fronn Eurka Messenrer

John Wright's hired mar, Joey. is the
xaruaes, product OF Victor Auriock's &C.
MUS that the pubic knows anything about
He is not entirely imaginary, either. Every
body experienced IN country lie has know
irs; one such aired man. but nobody ever
lnsw rvo
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

Many and many a man has borrowed $50
TO take that trip to Frisco, just for the sake
Of keeping the $50 from going TO waste
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

Up in Minnesota several Indians have
swallowed large quantities Of hair restorer
and the settlers expect some hair-raisinE
experiences.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

While the Endesvorers are having a good
time surely il IS hard 10 keep out OF ones
mind the suggestion that most OF them are
sitting around in crushed pies and cold
chicken scraps and debal;tatei jelly, and
drinking oceans OF coal-dust railroad water.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

II Dan Stuart had known that the Chris
tan Endeavor was going TO have these cut
rates. he would have postponed that little
entertainment at Carson until now.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

The Colorado insane asylurns are already
fun of Pullman porters who have been
driven mad by the word 'Ahr' And now
the Christian Endeavor trains are swelling
the list.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

We suggest that the one business letter
the new fast mail train has carried be
framed and sent to the postmaster general
al WASHINGTON
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

The papers are demanding that Hawaii
have but one !. We have two ourselves.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

Mark Twain could make it very funny for
Colonel Sellers 20 est raw turnips for break
fast. dinner and supper. but when Mark
Twain is threatened with a Ike diet him
self he probably can not see anything funny
in Il
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

It is related TIA; a sophomore ere CON.
nencemezt day Was crossing re camps,
of Emory college. Oxford. Ga. With II:
sweetheart. who stopped 70 read tie IN.
scr.ptson upon the stone 70 tns memory Q:
Igns-us Few. the first president,
What does ths. mean - she ASKED paint
rig 20 Ire Ii, Fiyi:-ncl a,ortu3s eat .
Proud o. as ability % trxns.ace Lztir. fss
STUDENT explained: He ayes' No. re
don't: he's dead New York Carsaaa
Advocate
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

II re Pcpuis.s saf-k tha- by hirsng
Noble Prertss 20 write heir school history
Of the United states. they s-- go.1z 70 have
Grz.. roasted sor letting rh< crime q IA
hAyyeE. iaey are wofs.ly ESssAkeR
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

General Rivera, the insursent general.
says: II do not expect to have a room in
the palace" he IS satisfied with a dun
Boon. This IS the first real down sensible
sort Of philosophy we have ever noticed Al
q captured Cuban.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

ingalls, should not be rnisses 'ato ary
Swiss m.xstry sAcket he sacGA sssy
right n Kansas and walt for tat fst<<ui
day which VIII grant k1z The p-3v1sg> u
Jumping OF some % lis mediocre ese-zses
aza tabosng h.< spu-s irto HEN
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

Hoh, Why should excursion trains
travel to Carson 10 an uneodly fight with
out single wreck, while the Christian En-
beavers are piled up In heaps every few
miles by accidents.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

II 10 not to be taken as sacriiege, on the
part OF the Christian Endeavorers that a
carload sang, as a dispatch relates Nearer
My God TO Thee" while going over Hager-
mans Pass at Leadville
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

Tom Watson roasts Bryan for sending a
telegram OF congrstulation TO Mckinley.
Perhaps Bryan knew Of Tom watson's let
ter OF acceptance and its rough experience
and was afraid OF the mails.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-07-03

the WEEKLY EAGLE
he . ku0 Rev aS1
gives thu se~s
ge< hys - ss0sers
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1897-08-24

This novel engineering work is called
a "pont transbordeur" and is designed
to fulfill all the purposes Of bridge,
while it will offer no obstruction to the
passage of ships with towering masts.
On each side OF the river will be erected
a small Eiffel tower. about ITO feet In
height, and these towers will be Joined
at the top by latticework bridge upon
which lines of rails will be laid. On
these rails will run n skeleton platform,
which can he pulled from side to side
by the agency Of steam or electricity.
From this platform. which will be loo
feet above the quays, will depend steel
wire ropes, which will support at the
level of the river banks slung carriage
large enough to accommodate q tram @,
full of passengers. besides other vehicles.
II is intended that this novel form OF
bridge shall be in connection with the
tram system at both sides Of the river,
20 that passengers can be carried across
the river without leaving their seats In
the cars. The work Of building the tow
ers has already been commenced, and II
Is expected that the bridge will be open
for traffic in IS months time. 1t is said
that the only contrivance bearing any
resemblance to this "pont transbor'
deur" is in operation at Bilbao. Cham
bers' journal.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1897-08-24
A scuol aR,s DEFAMATION.

1The following little poem was de
claimed bv Elvira b. Dunham at th'
close OF Rev. Seth Benson's school In thi'
district, some eighteen years ago. Sub,
seauently II was wanted, but had passed
into oblivion and there remained until
recently, when copy Of IL Was foune
by our better half while searching for
something else. now send Il for pub
LEGATION, knowing that not only th'
teacher, but some Others, will be K lad t.
see il in print. might add that 1t wa
written for the above mentioned pur
pose.
We thank you, dear teacher. as scholars should
do.
For nil this book learning and piety. too;
May the seeds you have sown. since school hrs'
began,
Produce rich harves, for tpis little band.
And as you 20 forth, In the field OF the Lord.
Whether teaching the youth. or preaching his
word,
Re true to Your calling, commend aud reproye
In the spirit Of Jesus, and filed with his love.
And when you have passed o'cr life's stormy sea,
Nav your home evermore with the glorhed lie
And now. beloved teacher, with tear-bcdimmed
Your hand We will clasp. then bid you goodbye.
LEMUEL DUNIAM.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1897-08-24

THE ExsENTEIC FEMALE GRABBED NE By THE
COAT kOLLoR
me afeckshuni,ely by the hand. "Oh,
please let my darter III! Shee's asweet,
gushin child of natur. "
Let her gush!" roared |, as mad as
I Good stick nc their tarual nonsense.
LET her gushw Where upon they all
sprung back with the simultaneous OBJ
seryashun that | was beest
MY female friends" sed /, "be4
you leeve I've few remarks 10 re-
mark. Wa them we'll The female
woman is one Of the greatest institoo-
shuns Of which this land can boste. It's
impossible to get along without her.
Had there bin no female wimin in the
world | should scarcely be here with
my unparaleld show on this very occa-
shun. She j. good III sickness, good in
wellness-good all the time. Oh, wom-
an. womanr' cried. my feelins work
ed up to hi poetick pitch. "You air
angle when you behave yourself, but
when you take of your proper apparel
e. (mettyforically speaken) get into
panty!oons, when you desert your fire
rides & with your beds full of wimin's
rites noshuns 20 round like roarin lions,
seekin whom you may devour some.
boddy-in short, when you undertake
to play the man, you play the devil and
air an emphatic noosance. My female
friends" continued rs they were in
dignantly departin, iva well what A.
Ward has sedr'-Artemus Ward.
Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1897-08-24
Warm Hair.

Talking ab0;,t warm hair, a lady In
Milwaukee, whose hair very nearly
matches the brick in the Wisconsin
building and who has been joked about
her red hair until She goes around and
shoots the last few thousand who make
ancient remarks about it, says she heard
a new thing on red hair the other day.
A friend from the east said 20 her,
MRS. -. rather like this Skaneat.
eles hair Of yours. She didn't like 10
ask questions, bat finally curiosity got
the best of her, and she asked. well,
what in the Daine Of the l3 apostles Is
Skaneateles hair;' ooh. says he, a. he
got Oh the other side Of the table and
held his elbow up over his head so the
press board wouldn't hurt, Skaneateles
is about 40 miles beyond Auburn, you
know" He is now carried in a sling,
and his friends have 10 get pass from
the matron Of the hospital to see him.
Newspaper.