Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1897-10-20
atausiae Gatherings.

l.
enjoyment of being abused to your
face now, and being praised behind
your back 100 years hence.
a9- "Freddie, why did you drop the
baby on the foor?" swell, I heard
everybody say it is a bouncing baby,
and wanted to see it bounce"
S6- The watch carried by the aver.
age man is composed of 9S pieces, and
its manufacture embraces more than
1000 distinct and separate operations
s6- A cynical brute suggests that
the reason that women were not given
boards IS because it is almost impossi-
BILE to talk while one is being shaved.
Va A soldier who remarked he had
been in seven engagements was inter
rupted by small boy, who said his
sister had been engaged eleven times,
p6r Stability is the great secret oi
success. No man can prosper who is
a mechanic one day a professional
man the next, and nothing the next
day.
sd- If yon were sick unto death and
should hear bell tolling for funeral,
how do think you would feel? Why
continue useless and semi-barbarous
custom ?
e@ Willie-"Ma, can people leave
parts of themselves in different pla.
ces?" "No; don't be ridiculous"
"Well, Mr. Jiggs said he was going to
Arizona for his lungs"
s6 A gushing poet asks in the first
line of q recent etfusion, "How many
weary pilgrims lie ?" We give it up ;
Iexperience has taught us that
D4ere are a good many.
pE A horse can live .25 days with
out solid food, merely drinking water ;
II days without either eating or drink
ing; and only five days when eating
solid food without drinking.
s9- A gentleman writing a letter
concluded it as follows: "Give Every
body's love to Everybody, so that No
body may be aggrieved by Anybody
being forgotten by Somebody"
s9r A religious society in Montana,
composed of young women, offers at q
small charge to do mending of all kinds
brought to them by young men who
have no one to do their sewing.
p@ "Hold your tongue for fool u
was the polite recommendation of an
Irish husband. "Sure, then, you're
going to spake yourself!" was the
equally polite reply Of the wife.
pg a lampwick which does not re,
quire trimming has been invented. 1t
is thick coil of clay, perforated with
minute holes, through which the oil
ascends by capillary attraction.
pG "Home is the place for boys" "
said Sprinks to his eldest pride and
joy. eyes," said the youngster, duti-
fully, "I like to stay at home all the
time but ma sends me to school,"
pg Miss Lucy YenGes says that the
art of sleeping consists in making the
mind a perfect blank before retiring.
If that were infallible, great many
persons would be asleep all the time.
b6 England has but fifty eight pris,
ons. Less tnan twenty years ago there
were one hundred and thirteen. Alb.
solute uniformity prevails in them all
in regard to diet, discipline and clothes.
aa5 If one hasn't the happy satlsfac,
ton of contemplating ones own sue
cess in life, the next best thing may
be to contemplate, without envious
feelings, the success Of ones neighbor.
B9 ~ will admit that in some ways
a tandem is all right" she said, shut
when it comes to courtship, should
think it would be mighty aggravating
to have a man talking to your back
hair"
p@ The largest telegraph Office in
the world is in the general post office
building, London. There are over
5000, operators, 1000 of whom are
women. The batteries are supplied by
10000 cells.
B@ 1t appears that there is a certain
kind of leather which contains poison
GUS germs which may result fatally to
the wearer. We often hear of "dead
mems shoes" Perhaps they are made
of this kind of leather.
I@ "Yor see, my DEAR" said Mr..
Younghusband to his wife, triumphant
ly, at 8 q. M, the other morning, "the
moment I begin to sing to baby she is
quiet" eyes," said his wife; "she is
easily frightened ; poor little thing"
p@ As soon as you see lump COM
ing out On or under the jaw on cattle,
wash it with warm water and soap,
then rub it with coal oil. The one
application as above precribed will
bring a sure cure. Paste this in your
hat.
sa "Wife, why do you open that
Window We only have ten degrees
of heat in this roon." "Yes, that's
so; and in the open air it's four de-
grees. Now I'll let those in, and then
it will be fourteen, and quite comfort
able here"
b6 The Knights of Pythias have
raised twelve thousand dollars for a
monument to John F. Rathbone, the
founder of the order. I: will be placed
in New Forest Cemetery in Utica, the
owners of the cemetery donating a
plot of 10000 feet.
H4" A Providence man of iconocias-
tic disposition has put an old fable to
a destructive test by letting pet fox
have the run of a vineyard with grapes
within his reach. The fox cares neith-
er for ripe grapes nor sour grapes but