The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1897-08-06
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Little Man (golf enthusiasm w.
don't you play golf? Big Man dh,os ""'
Why, because | object to chasing
quinine pill around cow-pasturs
IidBit
She-I think you had better send -,
another rat-trap, John. He-put
bought one only the other day She
l know, but there is a rat in that ono
--Tid-Bits.
Kind Old Lady-To what do Va, a..
tribute your uncontrollable ANNETTE
for strong drink? Is It bereditarv,
Weary Walke'-No, mum; its thIrstr
Philadelphia Record.
Sawyer seems to think n good deo,
of himself" IL should say so. no hss
had Moorish curves cut in his Office
doorway so he can get his head in and
out'-Chicago Record.
Mrs. Jobber-Too bad the now cook
spoiled the steak; she is so young and
inexperienced. Won't you be satisfied
with kiss instead. dear? Mr.. Jobber
All right; call her in.-Judge.
why don't that European war
you've been predicting right along come
off, Mr.. Sportly?" inquired his wife
81 suppose the kaleidoscope people are
not ready. "-Detroit Free Press.
Belinda, how do you treat stupid
man who admires your" Really.
don't know; when man admires me
l never do myself the Injustice to con.
slider him stupid. Chicago Record.
Mrs. Saver must feel that she was
very extravagant in buying that new
gown what makes you think SOP
shes begun to argue that it will be
the cheapest in the end."-Chicago
Journal.
81 hear that Judge Buckets is study
ing mind-reading," said the lean law
yer. IF he gets proficient" said the
fat lawyer, hell arrest the whole
town for contempt of court. Indians
polls Journal.
Herr Oil-Haf you heard dot dog OF
mine ate tape-measure undt diedl
Herr Kut-I suppose he died by inch
es, NIGHT var? Herr Oil-Aber nit; he
vent oudt in der alley und die Ply der
yard.--Columb;a Spectator.
ut was so dark in the parlor when
young DR.. Plummer came in that
did not notice he had shaved off his
mustache." Didn't you? | felt the
difference while you were getting a
light. "-Cleveland Plain-Dealer.
Jones-Sillibub has a medicine which
he declares Is a sure cure for heart
disease. Smith-Did 1t cure hint
Jones-Yes, 1t gave him such fright
full attack of indigestion that he for
/ got all about his heart-Harper's Ba-
Ear.
u. Addison.' Eyes, your excellen-
cy:' Il hope that the agriculurists
will appreciate the beginning Of our
efforts in their behalf" an what
way, sirY' well, in sending Hay to
England" -Pittsburg Chronicle-Tele.
graph.
DIR. Ende-There's nothing serious
the matter with Patsy, Mrs. Mulcahey'
l think little soap and water will do
him as much good as anything. Mrs.
Mulcahey-Yis. docther, an will Oi
giveitt him befoor or afther his males
Judge.
Mrs. Henpeck-Young Mrs Bagley'
who was married on last thursday
tells me her husband left almost I'M
mediately for the West on a business
trip. Henpeck fviciously-Nes; he Writes
me that he finds married life very
happy existence-Philadelph Norln
American.
Parke-So strong is habit they say
mans spirit goes right on DONG 'n'
same thing after death that ne uiu ~
life. Lane-That can't be true IN your
case. Parke-Why not! Lane-i-ooa
at the habit you have gotten INTO o.
shoveling the snow from your waiA'-
The Jester.
"Old man. YOU seem worried. "Nor
rled is no name for it. Brown Is com
Ing around at O'Clock to pay me 80.
"Thlnk he may not Gomez on ne
come all right; but Jones Is due u
4:15 to try to collect $40 l owe MN
Suppose he should get there just as
was being paid by Brown -Oli''''
natl Enquirer.
"Ah, yes" said the soulful younl
man. Il see signs of spring on ever
hand nowadays" "Why, didn know
von'd noticad r." declared the land
lady. as she threw shawl over TN
horsehalr lounge. through the sea. 0
which a long spiral of heavy wire na'
worn its way.-Cincinnau OomhereiS
Tribune.
Il have always felt sorry Tor Moan
said the large-hearted man. uon
seethe need for 1t, said the man oil IN
shrunken sympathies Looks to m
as if Noah got off pretty wen. Du
just think Of it. When the waters SUI
sided there was not soul ieit Tor n,n
to ask, Nov. what did tell you
Indianapolis Journal
Mrs. Pawson-My sister IS "orrieu
death over her son Reginald IN
wants him to enter the ministry III
father wants him to go into business
while Reginald himself mas eo' =.
mind set on being an actor anu say
nothing shall keep him from II. MT
Dawson Trunl how old is her ME-