The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1897-08-12
What Should Govern
The Marriage Mari?



Sentimental considerations do not al
ways rule in modern marriages but there
is usually an attempt TO pretend that
they do. Even the mothers of marriage
able daughters who are looking for rich
husbands will insist that they are only
concerned for the dear girls happiness.
But one woman has had the courage to
state the commercial view of matrimony
without disguise. In a recent article in
the National Review the Countess of
Desart insists that marriage without
money means misery, and that conse-
quently marriage market, and matrons
expert in the ruling rates, should be en-
Souraged rather than blamed. Such
frankness Is a little dsconcerting. Our
motives seldom look we'll when they are
examined in their naked simplicity. But
the principle expounded by Lady Desart
has long been admitted. Modern society
is largely arranged with a view to bring
ing about matrimc NAL engagements. 1t
is important, moreover, that these should
be of the kind known as desirable. What
satisfaction is there In bringing up ones
daughter well, in knowing that she is
clever and attractive and has many ac-
complishments, If she is simply to marry
some ordinary poor young man and go
to a home where cleverness and beauty
and accomplishments will be wasted
upon single undeserving person Even
in circles outside of society a more prac-
tical view of marriage is now held; and
the letters written to the yellow journals
calling for husbands and wives show
commercial rather than amorous inelina-
tlons. The man wants a woman who can
sew and cook and does not care to go TO
the theater; the woman asks for man
with a steady income
Prudence is, of course, an admirable
tNs 1d hn IN
that it can be carried too far Nor are
happy-go-lucky marriages. based upon
sentiment that may be evanescent,
always happy ones. A good deal is to
be said in favor of the pains which
French parents take to secure the flu
ture of their daughters. We do not
say that the initiative should be left
to the parents. Our English freedom
enables young men and women to- see
something of one another while they
are still fancy free; and attachments
formed under such conditions are quite
as likely to be permanent as those which
must be developed after marriage, If at
all 1t Would be a distinct loss If the rap
lures of young love- foolish as they may
be, were eliminated from the world. But
1t would be well If we were more par
ticular in the matter of marriage set
Elements, If parents felt responsibility
TO their daughters as well as to their
ophoI pipNlulilS lHtil WIltn tnty mar
ried and refusing to commit their whole
future comfort to any one man. There
is nothing in the dowry custom 10 Jar
with true sentiment; there is no dispar-
agement of a mans sincerity in a re-
quest that a father who is able to do so
shall settle a sum of money upon his
daughter. A great deal of nonsense has
been written and talked on this point.
But to say that sentimental considera-
tions are not the only ones is not the
same thing as saying that they should
have no weight whatever. Enough mari
tai misery has resulted from the disre-
gard of these to serve as warning. And
Lady Desart would find It hard work 10
prove that 'love matches usually lead
to the same end.
A part of Lady Desart's argument is
quite unworthy of the subject She de-
clares that there Is Something tragic"
In the Willingness often exhibited "hv
young lady tenderly nurtured and ex
qulsitely bred" to share the lot of "a
struggling artist, man of letters or pro-
1essionai man." How long will the bloom
or high breeding survive poor surround.
irss and sordid cares? Well, thai de-
pends on how high the breeding Is and
what the young woman's notions of nov
erty and sordidness are. 1t is diricult
TO go from home where life IS carrIod
on at ten thousand year to one where
everything must be done for two tbous-
ana But any humber of people ge. along