The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1897-08-07
JUST As NATURAL
A. LiTs-You Have been There YOURSELF
and Il sounds Like Your Wife.

puAJ anu aAAos ANbuabAA aAN eooNSA va NAN
veranda OF the stansbury house. 1t Is
early dusk. Mrs. Robson is supposed
to have dlned with the Stansburys. The
two stansbury children are playing on
the abbreviated lawn in front OF the
house Mr., stansbury takes a cigar
from his pocket and rolls Il critically be-
tween his thumb and fore dngerj
Mrs Stansbury-"were you thinking
of smoklng2"
Mr. stansbury-"Well, yes, I thought
! would"
Mrs. SIT seems to me that You
might ask Mrs. Robson II she objects to
smoking"
Mrs. Robson-"oh, my not Mfr Rob-
son smokes all over the house"
Mrs. SIT would be Just like Mr.,
stansbury to light his cigar and go puff
Ing away without saying word to any
one about IT,"
Mr., Sob, r6 Now, haven't light
ed this cigar yet, Are you sure you
don't object to 1t, Mrs. Robson?"
Mrs, R-"Object to TT The ideal
Our house Is full OF smoke all the time,
I'm never afraid OF the moths"
Mr., SIT won't annoy you, will II,
my dear, II | sit over here at the edge
where It will blow the other way?"
Mrs. s. with a nervous little laugh)-
II don't suppose II makes much differ
ence whether It annoys me or not
Mr. Swell, I'll not smoke II II an
noys you, ! didn't suppose Il would"
Mrs. S.-"For goodness sake, so
ahead and smoke II you have TO.
know you won't be happy until you get
that cigar going. ! dare say can stand
L."
Mr.. Son, well. can wait until
after awhile"
Mrs. s.-"For goodness sake. don't
wait on my account Go ahead and
smokci"
Mr.. Swell, I think WILL" Lights
his cigar)
Mrs, Sold you ever see anything
like II, Mrs. Robson? II Just shows what
hold habit like that can get on a
man. He isn't happy unless he has q
cigar In his mouth"
Mr.. S.-"Don't make 1t any worse than
1t Is, my dear. Never more than two q
day-only one In the evening"
Mrs. S.-"Goodness mel Two day!
II seems to me that's enough"
Mrs. R.-"Well, don't know-but 1t
always seemed to me that men enjoy
smoking so much"
Mrs. S.-"Mrs Robson, my dear, don't
you know that thousands OF men injura
tts he l,NFa l,,ia
man like Mr.. Stansbury ought to
smoke at all. He's OF nervous, irri-
table disposition, inclined to be very
cross with me and the children at times.
and think that tobacco makes him
worse than he would be naturally
Mr. S.-"Do ever beat you or the
chlidren?"
Mrs. S.-"Don't mind him, Mrs. Rob-
son. He's rather sarcastic at times
when he isn't feeling very we'll"
Mrs. r. daughIng)-'T don't believe
Mr. StaRsbury 10 very cross"
Mrs. ST don't know that you'd
call II cross, but he is-well, irritable,
I'll say some little thing to him and he'll
flare up in minute. He was out quite
late one evening last week. and. I'll do.
clare, he was simply unbearable AZ
breakfast next morning, (Mr, STAINS
bury slides further down Into his chair
and huns little tune) He seems to
be In better humor this evening"
Mr.. ST am always happy. my dear,
when ! hear you telling anyone all about
me. Mrs Robson, l don't mind at all
being held up as a horrible example.
You can see for yourself that l am q
depraved character"
(Nirs. Robson laughs)
Mrs. S.-"Really. Mr., stansbury, l
can't see that there's anything to Joke
about"
Mr.. s.-"can't you, my iove?"
Mrs. ST hope you'll not pay any
attention TO him, Mrs. Robson. don't
know when I've seen him act this way
before. Pah-h! I got Whit OF TINT
smoke then. That must be a bad cigar +"
Mr.. SIT hadn't ought to be-cost
two for quarter,
Mrs. S.-"No wonder we're hard UP.
II costs you n quarter every day for
cigars, does ~"
Mr.. SIT does. my darling-every
day l smoke two"
Mrs. S.-"A quarter a day practically
thrown away. How much would that
amount 10 IN n year? Let's see, nearly
two dollars week-about a hundred
dollars a year Think OF lt!'
Mr. S.-"Astounding!"
Mrs Swell, isn't It? That's the
way with him, Mrs. Robson. You tell
him something, aud It has about as
much effect on him as II you spoke TO
wooden Indlan-Just about! He seems
to think II perfectly proper for him TO
A..
year on cigars. with that much money
/ could send Lulu to the best piano In
structor In this town. A man has no
more idea OF economy"
Mr.. S.--"I'll tell you what's better
than that, my dear. II we give up this
house and camp out we can save over
five hundred year"
Mrs. S.--"Indeed"
Mr.. S.-"Then by putting ourselves on
a diet of oatmeal and crackers we can
keep the grocery bills down to about
six dollars a month. and save enough
on groceries alone to give Lulu the finest
kind of n musical education"
Mrs. ST. dare say YOU think that's
very funny Don't laugh at him. Mrs
Robson. II simply encourages him. I'm
very sorry, Mr., salisbury, mat YOU
can't be serious for moment, not even
for moment"
Mr.. ST. was simply trying to con.
vince you that ] had some practical
ideas as to economy"
Mrs. ST. suppose you'd make us live
on oatmeal before you'd give UP your
cigars"
MIR. STA that what sald2"
Mrs. S.-"That's what YOU meant,
dare say. It's nothing to Joke about,
I've always claimed, Mrs, Robson, that
smoking 10 tho next thing to drinking.
/ simply cannot understand why men
consider these matters 30 lightly. II
seems TO me terrible responsibility for
n man 10 smoke cigars In the presence Of
his own son. II anything ever goes
wrong with Freddie, ! shall always