Birmingham state herald., 1897-01-03
F U N {!

A primary teacher in Watervliet Sum day school took for subject, "The Lord Loveth a Cheerful Giver." She inquired if any one knew what it meant, when a little 4-year-old boy said:
 Miss L., I know what that means"
 "Well, George Edwin, what is it?"
 Tt means give whole lot, and don't cry over it.'"-Troy Times.
 "Just thirty years ago today" said the old soldier, the top of my head was grazerd by bullet.'
 There isn't much grazing there now, is there, grandpa?" was the comment of the youngest grandchild; and as the old gentleman rubbed his bare poll he had to admit the correctness of the assertlon.- Indianapolis Journal.
 mustn't tell any one.
 He-why?
 She-Oh, I don't know. I'd rather give you another than have you tell.-Boston Herald.
 Busiman-Do you want to do little work for me?
 Weary Wiggins-No, sir! never work for any man.
 Busiman-Tm sorry. I just wanted you to work the growler for me.
 (Wiggins faints.)-New York Truth.
 Say, you're the fourth feller that has come here to try to trade horses today" said Farmer Shortcrop. "Whuts got into you all?"
 Why" said the visiting farmer, sheep ishly, "the story got out someways that you'd got religion at the revival last night."-Cincinnati Enquirer.
 Ally-That novel of Thompsons is perfect mush.
 
 Philadelphia Times.
 Well now, that you are back, you can tell us how much it costs to go to Europe"
 "All you've got and all you can borrow over there."-Judge.
 s"Do you believe that a green Christmas makes fat graveyard?" asked the horse editor.
 q don't know anything about that" re- piled the snake editor, but I do know that any sort of a Christmas makes a lean pocketbook. ."-Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
 The bankruptcy court can boast some delightfully."- naive rejoinders How, sir, is it possible" angrily demanded the Op- posing counsel to the bankrupt, ito live in the luxurious style you have affected on $2, 900 year?
 x The witness replied, with an air of jus- tifiable pride, that that was problem to which he had devoted considerable time in the interest of social economy, and the results of his humble efforts were now before the court. t."-San Francisco Argonaut
 How do you happen to call this place Fellow that founded it was named Dale.''
 "But I don't quite understand" ss Simple enough. Dale was redhead- ed."-Detroit Free Press. Y Weary Watkins: Suppose you had your choice-all you could eat fer a month, CT all you could drink-which would you take?" Hungry Higgins: "It would wind up in my doin either of starvation CT the de- lirium trimmins, I dunno which."-In- idianapolis Journal.
 "After all," said the Cumminsville sage, "there is not so great a difference between me and dude." "No?" said the grocery loafer : "No He wears his clothes well, and my clothes are we'll worn. n."-Cincinnati Enquirer.
 is about finished. 1 have just enough left to buy Christmas present for my husband. I want { Proprietor (hurriedly): "Here, James, show this lady some cheap penwipers." Detroit Free Press. | In the Red Gulch Wayfarer's Rest Eastern Guest: Look here, waiter, I can't drink this coffee."
 Waiter (with brace of revolvers in his belD "Well, you can't eat 1t, that's dead sure so I guess you'lll have to go hout."-Somerville Journal. . A Thoughtful Child: "T've got somethin' here for Christmas present for mamma that'll just make her jump most out of her skim
 What isit?" s.ss 5l.
 Its mouse in a box."-cleveland Plain Dealer.