The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1897-10-23

about three days-you know: man with
fearfully bran new suit, hat, shoes, gloves
and cane, and that wriggly, uncomfortable
look that fellow wears when his whole
rig-out's right off the hook; girl with
equally new everything, from hat to Spats,
and looking as if she'd appreciate abou,
ten minutes OF wrapper and slippers a
whole lot. Well, this pair certainly did
carry the brittle chip on their shoulders.
They seemed to ne just looking for trouble
with each other, and "a heap Of it, and
like to have spraned my neck looking
dreamily up in the air while their rows
were on | figured it that they got married
to get even with each other for something.
"'Let's 90 up to the dome, said the girl.
I" Not any, thanks, said the man. Pm
too strong
"'Well, I'll 90 up alone, then, sad she,
swapping her eyes.
Not today, you won't said he, with
mean man sticking out all over the way
he said it,
"'Oh, | don't know said the girl,
dreamily. Not that | haven't been up
before a few times s.
The deuce you say he chopped out.
You never told me that! Who with, I'd
like to know?'
You don't know, do you?' said she
with one of those slow smiles a woman uses
to work a man into States prison with.
Well they did have it out some, now, Pm
a-telling you. | went off in corner and
pretended to watch spider do a fly grab
hing game while the scrap went on. Then
heard a gurgle of two, and it W IS all right
for while. About three minutes later
started 'em for the basement TO show 'em
the machinery. The man made little
stumble on the dark steps, and he s4id
DAM
Do you know who you are with, rray?'
asked the girl, stopping stock still.
Unfortunately, yes, he replied, and
began to hunt around for another spider to
TAKE an interest IN Tor awhile.
oh, well, come along" said she, after
pause. 1t is impossible for me not to
reflect, though, that the last time was
here wasn't compelled to listen to-
" Look here, said the man, | want to
know, and want to know right now, who
the COMPOUNDED, blithering Miss Nancy
idiot was that you trapsed around here
with, and 50 on, and was reduced to the
necessity of twirling the pedals of bike
that was tethered in the corridor for the
five minutes or so that this mix-up lasted
Pm wondering yet whether that pair hailed
from a State where 'incompatiblity of
temperament is loop.hole for break
away in the High Court Of Part en-
Asunder, for III bet red apple they won t
eat their Thanksgiving dinner together
1t pains me to state that the finish of their
Capitol tour was their ad journment to the
restaurant after the final scrap, and that
the groom threw more cocktails into him
self than he absolutely required in his bust
ness. He was good natured then, and
whole building all over again. But says
to him-the cocktails induced him to adj
dress me as 'Bill'-you see, "Willie, you
require rest you are very weary, Willie;
come up here next Fourth of July and ri
shoot off a bunch of fire crackers, and away
they went. the girl with light in her eye
that didn't like for thirty cents, and his
Martiny iaglets with the whole building
and all the grounds in his left-haDd vest
pocket, by the looks of him cant recall
when | have so much ached to give a man
a good, swift boot
REAL ENGLISH GOO. GOOERS
1 had pair of English goo. goocrs
around few weeks ago that gave me that
queer pain. They were making a tour of
the world, and l couldn't exactly figure
how long they have been married, but they
certainly were as affectiouate bunch as
ever got next to. 1t kind O. knocked me.
WV, ioi u hi"oyo 81 lnuCH dDUut
the reserve Of English people. But with
these two it was a case OF Bertha, me own 4
and Edward, me King from cellar to gar
ret. O. oout d, Walkod ahort zen f. +
ahead of 'em to let 'em have room, bu. all
the same they gave me that empty feelin..
But | didn't start to tell you how much
they loved each other, but how they hatei
the United States. Neither Of 'em COT ID
abide this country at all, and they gave
everything in the Capitol the joyous ha-ha
from the go-off. Now | stood for this for
quite long while, but all the time could
feel the Ohio Ameriean creeping into my
gorge like cascade. They looked at the
pictures.
How stupid, said they in chorus.
"They looked at the statuary.
"'What a Brummagen lot, said they in
one voice.
ct was all the same all over the build
ing. The whole thing, from one wing to
the other; got the hoarse boot from the pair
OF them, until the spirit Of '76 began to
rattle around in me so hard that | could
just barely keep my voice in. Finally |
got 'em around to the painting of the Bat