The Monitor-register., 1897-06-04
Tommy's Composition on Spring.

Spring according to f~losofers is the
season that comes after winter but i
don't think so always. It's my privite
opinion that it's Winter that comes after
spring sometimes because I've seen many
a year when winter has just regerlerly
chased spring inter what a Pote once
called the lap of summer, as if summer
had a lap you could sit down on. It's
name is what dictionery writer's would call
a sarkasm. When it comes folks have less
spring 10 'em than they have at any
other time. Your )ints don't work easy
and you DONE want TO get up in the
morning because you have those tired
feelings you see spoke of in ADVERTISE
ments of patent medicines which re-
minds me of a joke.
"Why is a man in spring like a bicycle
wheel ?"
because he's tired"
l think its new but maybe not.
There are several other kinds of
springs carriage springs, mineral
springs, watch springs and bed springs.
Also the springs Ksngaroos give and the
springs ships spring when they spring
aleak but as they aren't the springs | am
to write about l shall not write about
them except to say hat l dom see why
mineral springs are called mineral
springs. l wen to Saratoga once and
visited all the mineral springs there was
there and not a mineral was sprung on
me, only water. MIybe its another
sarkasm.
Spring is also a favorite topic of potes,
Pop says. And when l said what's a
topic Pop said a subject, but l guess he
was joking because when l asked him if
an Englishman was q topic of @ leen
Victoria he said no he was a subject, and
then we got all mixed up. II a topic is a
subject one minute and then the next
minute a subject ANITA topic I don't see
where we're at. Potes however do write
about spring there's no use of talking.
Pop says vixen they can't think of any
thing Else to write about they sit down
and write about spring. It gives a
splendid chance to betray their imagina
tiop he says. It's dead easy too. l
wrote a pome on it myself though l don't
| pretend to be a pote. l may b. some
day but | hope not. If there's a circus l
can join IN do that because it's more fun
than being a pote. 1 began it with the
title Spring just like all the rest and
then l said
o spring 1 always think
When on me you are sprung
You are the worst season that ever went
unhung
You amt all joys and blossoms white
By a darn sight.
But nine to one you bring more wheezes
Coughs and sneezes
Than pleasure to our hearts
Or strength into our kneeses.
Pop thought that it was good aud sent
it to our church paper but they sent it
back just because it had the word darn
10 it | guess. Buffalo Bill had a spring
too which 1 forgot to MENTION. He
throws balls out of it to shoot at, but
that kind amt my ''topic" either SO l
won't mention it.
Spring is sometimes called a season.
There are several other kinds of seasons,
pepper and salt and the opera season.
Pepper is a hotter season than spring,
and salt amt quite so fresh, The opera
season l don't know much about though,
ma says it's fun and Pops always glad
when it's over on account of the ladies
hats which he says is plain highway rob-
berry to pay So and not see anything but
them. Ma said you don't go to see you
go to hear. And Pop retorted at her
with "well, l vent to see" and | laughed
and said what on a steam boat or a
yacht ? That smoothed things over for
the time being, but its come up once or
twice since, and its my privite opinion
if the opera season hadn't stopped when
it did there'd have been a separation in
the family.
It's like a good many other things
though. You can't get to the COLE of
your ambitters without goin' through a
certain amount of trouble. You can't get
into office without being a candidate.
You can't get to Philerdelf, without
going through New Jersey. No more
can you get to vacation and the Forth of
July without taking in spring, so being a
necessary weevil l think it best to take
spring as she comes and if you can't
make out a good case for it without tell
ing lies. say no more, which l shall now
do.-Harper's Bazaar.