New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-04-12
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

Commenting on the assertion OF a newspaper
directory editor that many religious journals make
deceptive statements about their circulation, The
Waterbury American" says: "Our experience with
some OF the editors Of newspaper directories Is
such as to make us think that they are not good
Judges of truth II the religious editors msrepre-
sent in their reports TO the newspaper directories
moro than tho newspaper directories misrepresent
the secular journals which make report, then
they are liars, indeed"
She had wandered into a department store
Il want some favors for german" she ex-
planned n foor-walker.
Count or baron?" he asked. politely
She gave him a naughty glance and walked out
Chicago POST
There was a written examination on the Book
OF the Acts the other day in London Sunday
school and one scholar turned In the following:
when they saw Stephen they were In such
temper that they knashed him with their teeth,
and charged him TO be taken out OF tho city and
stoned. stephen said: 'Ye stiffnecked things. why
speak We So? The second supernatural event was
the striking down dead of Anarias and Sapphira
his wife for telling lies TO Peter. This was super
natural because II Is not natural TO have persons
struck down dead for telling lies! Ananias and
sapphira were two great prophets. Ananias
prayed to God to take him to Heaven, and 1t came
to pass that "a he on his horse he was carried
up TO Heaven"
What became Of that samuels girl that Potters-
by was flirting with last summer
You mean the girl that Pottersby thought he
was flirting with? She married him."-(Tit-Bits
There is only one successful way OF getting a
man up early" says hotel clerk. I'VE have 10
send boy 10 his door who will knock until he
hears and then tell him that there Is a telegram
for him. That always brings a commercial man
out at once, and as soon as he opens the door Tor
the telegram we Just say: Sir 1t is 1870 o'clock
He will slam the door shut with the biggest sort
,Io,,. tbo o1 ~ a
wild bull That wakes him up pretty thoroughly.
and he comes downstairs feeling so sheepish that
he doesn't say a word. We practise that deception
every morning We've got 10. The other morning
we awoke n man In that way after trying tho bell
repeatedly He was mad at first, but when he
ca me downstairs he said 1t would have cost him 500
n he had missed his train
Evidently MIR Bailey. that most ardent pursuer
OF the spectacled Jade Minerva. never heard OF
have no time for study Il he wore dress suits and
went out" Well poor Mt Gladstone has read
10 do II while wearing all the necessary clothes
the most exacting conventions OF his day called
for And Mr.. Bafour and great host OF English
ana Continental statesmen and Americans. too.
eminent in the arts, sciences and statesmansnip;
have managed to find time to live and learn. and
i've and learn in all decercy. Mr. Bailey might
we'll pattern after Balfour He might learn some
thing n he merely hung about the outskirts OF the
eminent e1,is "conservative's Intellectual and political
sct.-Philadelpha Press
Professor Reynolds. of Yale, thinks there Is
,rh I'm tho story that chair Of athletics Is advo-
Gated for the university by certain alumni. lie
SAYS: "It !s simply old story which appeared
about three years old trumped up again. At that
time some prominent New York graduates agitated
this subject OF establishing athletic professor
ship but It came nothing. 1t is my opinion that
this is the only foundation for the recent report"
and your advance met with firm refusal?"
"It seemed 10 me more Ike syndicate refusal
before all the family got through with me.'-(De
trot Journal
John F. Cuddy a farmer. OF Baltimore County.
Nd who died the other day. made the first
trip on Better cooper's locomotive the Bait
more and Ohio on August 2S. 1890 lie also pres
ent when Professor Morse sent the first Geographic
message over the Baltimore and Ohio wires between
! Baltimore and Washington
Blkins-IIow Is business wilkins?
Wilkins-Can't make II CO. At this rate I'll be
bankrupt in another month. don't seem TO have
any head for business
BIlkins-No you haven't; but you have a good
stand and # you'll promise 10 Keep hands of and
let me run things I'll go in with you as partner
Wilkns-Done friend In need Is friend In
deed -
Guest OF Mr. wilkins (en years after)-What
magnificent place you have! Everything that
wealth could buy or heart wish You have been
wonderfully prosperous. Mr.. wilkins;
only half the profits OF my great establishment.
lust tell you my old friend. the mistake o. my
life was In taking partner'-tNew-fork Weekly
Earl Gray Wilson, the newly elected Mayor OF
Morrow Ohio is said to be only twenty-one years
old.
a Honeymoon Incident. -she-Thls road Is very
steep Can't get a donkey 70 take me up'
He-Lean on me- darling.-CTit Bits.