The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1897-03-05
Courteous Childran.

NINA tnat there should be two laws of
conduct. one for grown-up people and one
for children, and that well-regulated
child should refuse to initiate his elders
except in few particulars where imita-
ton may be Thoroughly agreeable to the
initiated party; but it is far from plain
to the child, writes Marion Washburne
in the Chicago Herald. lie tends with
all the force of his nature to do unto 9TH
ers as they do unto him, and while it may
be the part of the regenerated to do as he
would like to have others do. still this is
a good deal to expect of young child,
that direction; Moreover, if there be two
laws Of conduct for the child and the
adult, it seems scarcely fair to require
more OF the child than of the adult. If
there is to be any difference as to what
constitutes right for the child and the
have the harder rule to follow. If, there.
fore, it is so hard for the grown-up indi-
yiduat to keep from interrupting the lit
tie one, he ought not to expect that weak
er one to keep from interrupting him. If
what the child says is Of no Importance
TO the grown man or woman, it must be
remembered that what they say is equally
cannot possess their souls i'll patience un-
I'll he says his little say, by what right do
they expect him to be patient while they
speak? Any child, unless unusually timid
and brow beaten, will continue to inter-
rupt Just as long as it is interrupted,
without intending the least HARM
What are you going to do about it p I
hear some one ask. Surprising that the
mother is convinced that i, is right and
fair to treat a child as she wishes him to
treat her. She is not the only member of
the household. There is the. father and
n 10 tSvvnc nj,
more old-fashioned grandparents who
cam see any sense in such new-fangled
notions: What are you going to do with
them?"
Well, l should labor with them. Not
that should have the least hope of con-
Vertlng them, but that [ should want to
make my own position clear. And then I
should rigidly refrain from interrupting
my child myself, 10 matter what anyone
else might do, and l should treat him
with careful courtesy as often as I could
remember to do it, and apologize to him
when l forgot. A child is the most loving
little forgiven under the sun, and will
initiate, a lapse for which you have ex-
pressed due contrition. And when I ask
my child to do anything for me should
really ask it, and leave him free to refuse
me if he wanted to. If he did refuse, I
don't think l would coax him much. l
:"
injured air, but simply letting him feel his
full freedom. 1t is only by being free
to accede to a request Or to refuse it that
a child enters into the JOY Of willing serv-
ice.
am going to be personal bit. I have
had so many letters either asking outright
if | had any children or implying that l
didn't that ! wish to announce that
have four children, on whom all these
theories have been tried, with what
seems to me uncommonly satisfactory
results. Moreover, | know a number Of
other children belonging to my friends
who have survived similar treatment. In
this matter of courtesy my eyes were
opened by Helen Hunt Jackson's .'.Bits of
Talk About Home Matters" Therein
she describes a day with courteous
mother in a manner that convinced me
that with the best intentions in the world
I was not consistently courteous. I think
conviction of sin upon reading it. Since
then | have tried to mend my ways, and
in trying have discovered how widespread
and deeprooted is the error.
The right way to teach courtesy is to
treat q child eourteously from the cradle
up; If +; this has not been done, and the
child is already rough and unmannerly, !
think the only way is to take him into
your confidence. Acknowledge your mis-
take with him and ask him to help you
overcome it's evil effects. If there are
those in the family who cannot be
brought to do as you do, tell them frank,
" of the disagreement and ask him to
help you prove that you are right in
treating him as if he were young gentle
man. A boys sense of loyalty is strong
so is a gir!'s-and if you can once make a
child see that you are on his side and try
ing to obtain for him fair and rational
consideration, you are sure of the best
possible ally in the effort to train him. It
is not at all out Of the range of possibili-
ties that with your aid and sympathy he
may even manage to be uncommonly po-
lite to those who are rude to him. But
don't expect this all at once 1t is a rare
thing even with the best-bred people, and
when he fails to say please and thank
YOU do not rebuke him but pass it over
in silence, waiting until some hour when
his heart is open and full of love to re-
mind him of the lapse. And as long as
you see him trying hard do not even do
this, but encourage him in the difficult
way which your own ignorance has made
so unnecessarily hard.-Harper's Bazaar.
The Pushing Woman in Society.
Why one woman remains in the hum
Il rH,,v0 cha l.