The Topeka state journal., 1897-05-15

Some men do business as they trade
| horses.
/ When a man gets a shave and a hair
cut. he looks as good as new.
Probably no man in the world ever
had among his women relatives two
who agreed upon what was his duty.
Remember that people care nothing
for your misfOrtUnes or sorrows: they
are interested only IN your successes.
Our idea of a thoroughly good and
consistent church member is one who
| is glad to have his minister call on him
during business hours.
Another Atchison girl has become en-
gagged. She has told her II bosom
friends of the fact, and yet she expects
to keep it a secret for two years!
One reason why all of US down in our
hearts have unbOunded respect for an
old wOmanS cures, is that she never
charges So a visit and her sympathy
never sounds like the clinking of coin.
Just as sure as woman forgets TO
take her handkerchief with her, some
one tells her a tale of woe, and she is
compelled to weep under such embar-
RAISING circumstances that she doesn't
enjoy it.
waits the table at church socials-
If she enjoys it, she becomes a regular
hand at the work, and in time is re-
ferred to as fSiSter.' If she dislikes it,
she drops out, but she loses her Fepu-
tation as a sincere" Christian in doing
it.
We hear great deal about the Lord
loving cheerful givers. We wonder
where he finds them.
A certain Atchison woman is a great
kicker at the grocery stores, but she
has good things to eat at her house all
right.
Very often, on hearing of the death
of a useful man, honest people wonder
why they who are more worthless have
been spared so long.
Every time we meet a girl who used
to be named Maggie, and ask her name,
we are informed of another way of
spelling Marguerite"
You spend great deal of time in
mercilessly criticising others that
should be devoted to a candid examina-
ton of your own faults.
An Atchison business man failed late
~ who never had anybody in his place
except loafers. No wonder he failed.
LOafers should not be allowed around a
place of business.
An Atchison business man who start
ed in a few months ago at taking
drink before breakfast, is beginning to
visit other business men in business
hours. This is a sure sign of approach
ing trouble.
An Atchison man is a firm believer in
inspiration. He was recently engaged
at a prayer meeting in praying for
forgiveness for his enemies, when he
suddenly thought of plan to do his
enemy up, which he has tried since with
success.
When a business man is a success,
his councillors advertise him
No business can stand still; if it does
not improve, it goes backward.
Every one expects a great deal of the
future, although the only certain thing
in the future is death.
The trouble with keeping your latch
string out is that you are soon out of
everything else in the house.
A woman's idea of true genius is to
be able to order just enough ice cream
for a church social that not a spoonful
is left over.
Whenever a woman wants to put a
letter or receipt where her husband will
not find it, she secretes it in the family
Bible.
Every once in a while some new fan
gled notion is sprung that makes those
of US that were brought up in the old
fashioned way, wonder how we lived to
grow up.
The greatest noise in the barn yard
is made by the hen that lays only an
occasional egg. The old pioneer hen
that lays eggs as faithfully as the clock
strikes, doesn't make much noise The
people are a good deal like the hens in
this particular.
-
A worthy Atchison couple is travel
ing in the vale of humiliation. Their
daughter was i'll recently, and they ask
ed their minister in to pray for her. The
girl was deliriOus, and during the whole
of his visit shouted, Whats trumps?''
What's trumps?''
Ottawa Chatauqua Assembly, June II
to %. One fare Via Santa Fe.
Suffered Most in Spring