Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1897-07-28
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oo, MISS olhftn, all Is over DetWeen
nsW You've hit It," Then give me
back the presents promised you."-
Sketch.
Mr.. lpstein-Does dot novel end uu
sad, or oderyise? Mrs. lpstein-It ends
fine! Everybody gets rich in der last
ehapter.-Puck.
II awoke 30 find the house full of
smoke" Gracious! And YOU didn't
lose your headY NO; held my nose
Detroit Journal
Arthur, dear, have you spoken with
father about our engagement II
can't find him anywhere owes me
some money."-Ex.
Dibman-Ddd your watch stop when
you dropped 1t ON the floor? Magley-
or course 1t did. Did you think 1t would
go through ?-Tit,Bits.
Minor Pcet--Ah, how do? Did Won
get my book l sent you yesterdays
Hostess-D couldn't sleeu
till I'd read it-Punch.
He (sympathizing with his bride. who
has Just been stung)-How Intelligent
was that bee, my dear, to know thai
were ON our honeymoon!--Judy.
Gadzooks-The Greeks might have
saved themselves by n rapid advance.
Eounds-rhey seemed to think they
could save themselves better by u rapid
retreat.
Teacher (angrly) don't you an.
swer my question. Bobby? His Brother
Tommy answering for hlm)-Please,
sir, he's got peppermint In his speech.
-Tit-Blts.
Reporter-That fellow who wanted
his name kept out of the paper called In
to-day. Oh he was mad Editor-What
about? Reporter-It seems we kept II
out.-Tlt-Bits.
How Is this count they say the
stone In this ring you gave me is ind.
tationT "Oh, like enough. l never
was very strong In mineralogy."-Hu.
morlstische Batter
The Wife, think we ought to hayQ
daughters voice cultivated, John, if II
doesn't cost too much. The Husband
1t can't cost too much, my dear, II il
will improve 1t any.-Puck.
Half the world" sagely observed Mr..
Billus, never knows what the other
half is doing" ''Thats generally true"
retorted Mrs. Billus, eying him sharp.
ly, 'as to the better half. Chicago
Tribune.
Fuddy-You call money stamps
don't you? Duddy-Yes. Fuddy-And
money is currency. So l suppose that
when you speak of an elastic currency
you refer to rubber stamps.-Boston
Transcript.
She-How funny that you should be a
Presbyterian, while your wife is an
Episcopalian! He-What makes you
think she is an Episcopalian? She
Didn't you say she was a confirmed in
valid New York Press
"McGibbs is contemplate creature"
I'm what particular wayr We'll, he Is
the kind of man who would send anoth-
er man Sunday newspaper without
marking the article he wants him %
read. Chicago Times-Herald
Good Idea.-Mrs. TenspOt-Isn't II
odd that the encores are always much
more enjoyable than the regular mum.
bers ON the program? Mr. Tenspot--
Yes, it is. l wonder why they don't
sing the encores first?-Judge.
"You want to marry my daughter,
eh?" said the practical man; ''we.I,
what provision have you made for the
future?" "Oh, as to that" replied the
sultor, "rll join the church right away
Philadelphia North American.
"How still they are" remarked Mrs.
Fogg, apropos of the young couple In
the next room. YES" replied Mr.. T.,
'it reminds me OF my army days. 1t
was always wonderfully quiet just pre-
vious to an Engagement. Boston
Transcript
At the Intelligence Of1iee.--"Have you
any cooks that weigh 200 poundsf"
Goodness! What do you want with
such a big oneY' well, we would like
one that won't be always trying to ride
my wife's wheel ON the sly."-Detroit
Free Press. =
"You may talk as you like" said a
solid citizen, but there was one good
thing about the giadiatorial fights OF
olden times What was that p 1.-THE
loser never had chance to talk 10 the
papers and explain why he lost. .'-Bcs-
/ ton Herald.
Say" remarked the war editor, Il
don't see how Turkey ever got her
forces transported into Greece. do
your Certainly" replied the political
/ editor; ''she got hold of all the passes.
Ask me something hard."-Cincinnad
Commercial Tribune.
An Interpretation.-"I wonder" said
Mrs. Cumrox thoughtfully, what that
nice, old-fashioned lady means by put
ting p. p. c. ON her card" THAT
means she is going away" replied heI
daughter "Oh, see, and she wants us
to know that she is going to travel in
q Pullman palace car."-WashingtH