Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1897-08-19

poetry in motion as. handsome young
lady on her bike
The Chalute Blade Questions after
this fashion: .'Oh. consistency in gold
bug editorials. where art thon?,'
-
Lillian Russell says that every time
she married it has ,oeen for protection.
MIR. Dingiey ought to have made a
place for Lillian in his biII.-Kansas
City Star
Warren KnaGs says: I'VE are now
living and hoping for prosperity under
the Dingley Bill; at least it is supposed
to be the Dingley Bill. as nobody else
will claim 1t as his offspring"
1 see in your last issue that you have
noticed the deplorable condition OF the
Great Bend cemetery Why do not the
people form eemetery association
and arrange to have the City of the
Dead kept in good order?
-
Ellsworth Is located a long way from
heaven The editor of the Messenger
says SO. and he ought to know: "A
woman registered ar one of our hotels
last Saturday as Sarah Elizabeth
Bentenhou residence, no home but
heaFen-" She failed TO ind any ae-
quaintances in Ellsworth. as she was
long distance FROM home"
-
To show our eastern friends what 4
hard time our farmers had TO get hands
TO harvest the immense wheat crop We
clip the following, which was said to De
nailed on the trout gate: Harvest
hands wanted. Hired girl, blonde and
genial Cabinet organ music in the
evening Pie three times 2 day. Three
spoons Of sugar with every cup OF cof-
fee. Hammocks, feather beds or
leather divans at your option for sleep
ing. Rising hour 9 O'Clock in the morn
ing. Three hours rest at noon. Come
one, come all. :.
Did it serve him right: He stoCd d
on the porch in the evening as the sun
went down; and TIE June bug bright,
in the starry night, few merrily through
the town On, sweet were the gentle
zephyrs that blew from the baImy
south; and red were the lips and sweet
were the sips that ne took from her
pretty mouth Her tiny waist was en-
eIrcled by his arms SO strong and true.
Said he. Whose duck are you. IoveT'-
4Ourn, she murmuTed, '-and whose
are yOu?" On. the haHeBed hours
that evening" Oh, the cruel caprice of
fate. Her father. unkind. stole up
from behind and kicked him clear over
the gate. Ellsworth Messenger.
*
It does not appear whether the
writer of this pants article is a wearer
Of pants or simply a painter after the
Wearer OF pants, as the authorship has
been lost in its painting rounds: Pants
are made for men and not for women.
Women are made for men and not for
pants. When q man pants for a
woman. and a woman pants for man.
they are pair of pants; such pants
don't last Nen are often mistaken in
pants Such mistakes are breeches of
promise. There has been much dis
cussion as to whether pants are singu-
lar or plural. Seems 10 me when men
wear pants it is plural and when they
don't its singular. Men go on tear
IN their pants and it is al right When
pants go on tear it's all wrong"
How would this sort OF marriage Ger
emony suit the up TO date" girl: It
is supposed To have originated in West
ern Kansas, the birthplace of the
novel and new: Wilt thou take her
for thy pard. for better or for worse:
to have to hold. TO fondly guard till
hauled of in hearse? Wilt thou let
her have her way. consult her many
wishes; make the FIRE up every day, and
help her with the disheS2 Wilt thou
give her all the stuff her little purse
will pack: buy q boa aud q muff: a
little sealskin saques Wilt thou COM
fort and support her father and her
mother, Aunt Jsmima, Uncle John,
three sisters and brother?r Aud his
face grew pale and blank. il vas too
late to jilt: As through the chapel floor
he sank. be sadly said. wilt" and
he yilted-