davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

A Chicago heiress is going to marry
a foreign lord named Tweedmouth. Is
he any relation of Flannelmouth'S?
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05
pnck. Widow Reagan

Puck: Widow Keegan (philosophizing)
Isn't it shtrapge, Mister Kelly, thot
some of tn shnfartest men in thish wur-
ruld LUX loixe dom fools?
Mr.. Kelly (doubtfully)-Are yez thrying
L fiatter me. Norah?
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

The sultan's policy seems to be to
conce6e everything. but to do nothing
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

An Indiana skunk farm has failed
These failures are beginning to smell
to heaven.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Kansas City Star: In his fight on
Quay Mr.. Wanamaker names TO names"
but when he speaks of a man who owns a
majority of the legislature, and of d
boss who has taken the state by the
throat, everybody knows whom he
means.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

The tariff hearings are being con-
Quoted on the plan of go-as-you-please.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

San Francisco Chronicle: The story
related about an alleged sell out of the
Cuban insurgents by President Cleveland
will be received with derision even by
the enemies N Grover
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Philadelphia Times Mill buildings are
seldom as handsome as those of banks.
Hence of late new mills being built in
Germany and banks going up here.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Tt is easier to write 1897 on a check
than it is to get it accepted
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

L Maceo still lives, then rumor is a
deiusion and a SANDER
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Pugilism is said to be cure for
asthma.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Detroit Tribune: Some idea of the
Princess Chimay's affection for her gypsy
lover may be gained from the report that
she intends to learn Hungarian in order
to talk to him.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Tit-Bits: Baroness-'Clara. bring me
those dozen pocket handkerchiefs on
which l told you to mark my mono
gram" Lady's Maid-"Here they are my
LADY, Baroness-"But how it this? You
haven't marked all of them with my
monogram" Lady's Maid-"Indeed
have, my lady. l marked one with your
monogram, and l have marked all the
others with the word 'Ditto.''
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

New York Tribune: Apparently we
need to turn some OF our attention from
the protection of Venezuela against Euro
pean aggression to the protection of our
own sailors from aggression by Vene-
zuela's nearest neighbour, Colombia 1t
is not pleasant to find our commerce i'm
posed upon by one of the family of ma
tions we seek to benefit.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Chicago Record: OF Modern Applica-
tion.-"Badger. did you enjoy the play
Richard III ~ Yes; that fellow had
dent of any bicycle club on earth"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Puck: Burglars Gully, where's d
silverware?" Man of the House-"I-
s-sent it all away yesterday to be re
plated
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Life: Ambiguous-'I am sorry to hear
that you have lost your wife, Cicero
YES. pahson, but de Lawd knows wot's
beS' foh u.s."
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05
SOME EDITORIAL COMMENTS.

Philadelphia Record: A tariff on qui-
nine would mean freedom for the malarial
germ, and bondage for its fever-smitten
victim.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph: The
Pessimists Christmas.-"How did your
Christmas presents suit you?" asked the
Optimist of the Pessimist. Well" was
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Tit-Bits: Willie Mamma, they say
history repeats itself, don't they?"
Mother-"Yes, dear" Willie-"Well, why
don't it repeat itself when I'm trying to
learn it?"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

New York Weekly: Teacher-"What is
that letter. Pupil don't know. -
Teacher-.'What is it that makes honey?"
GLUCOSE"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Courier journal: That Mississippi rail-
road engineer who refused to stop his
train for a mob furnishes an object les
son that might well be taken into con-
sideration by our Kentucky jailers.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Hoods Pills are purely vegetable and
do not purge, pain or grippe. All drug
gists. Csc.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

the reply of the sad one, ST didn't re-
ceive the things l expected to get; but
then l had no hopes of getting them
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-05

Cincinnati Commercial Tribune: A
Natural Deduction.-The Teacher-'When
a womans husband dies, Patsie, what is
called? Patsie-"A wilder" The
Teacher-"And when a mans wife dies.
what do we call him." Patsie, after
some Thoughtful wid-out-her, mu-um!'
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
Factory Buildings.

One of the most perplexing problems
that the mechanical engineer OF the su-
perintendent of a manufacturing estap-
iisbment encounters is the dovetailing
of new buildings upon old ones SO as TO
work in harmony with them and at the
same time introduce such improve
ments as may be necessary. frequently
half n dozen buildings are erected OH
large plot of ground, each building FAC
ing in a way that seems most cohven
;ent at the time and without any particu :
lar reference to the others. When the
establishment has grown SO that tno
available ground area must De nearly
covered over with buildings and each
one must, either by shafting or betting
be connected with its neighbor or Win
some central source of power, then 'ne
trouble arising from lack OF harmony III
the original structures makes itself iei'
in a most aggravating manner. 1t seems
sometimes as though trouble hao peen
created on purpose by those VINO hrs,
erected the shops, so aggravatins anu
recommending do the buildings ap'
near The moral therefore is that III
putting up a shop it is well to tnink 4,
long way ahead and to consider at ieas'
some of the most probable contingencies
If the future. easier s Magazine
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
INEQUALITY In the World.

There is and there. always has been
inequality in the world in spite OF the
striving of generous hearts and enlight-
ened minds for equality. Although
equality has never ceased to show itself
and effect itself within the different or
ders. and in modern times to character
ize at least specifically that large COM
posite order which we call good society,
civilization is still embruited and en-
dangered by inequality. One need not
allege instances. They are abdundant III
every ones experience and observation,
and those who dread or affect to dread
the dead level of equality are quite right
in saving that even i'll political de-
mocracy there is as much Inequality as
anywhere. But this does not prove that
they are right in admiring it that 1t Is
not offensive and stupid. Inequality still
persists. but so does theft, so does muir
der. SO does unchastity, so do almost all
the sins and shames that ever were. In
eouality is, in fact, the sum OF them.
I'm the body of this death they tester
and corrupt forever. As long as we have
| inequality we shall have these SINS ana
shames, which spring from it and which
live OH from inferior to superior. Few
vices live from equal to equal, but the
virtues flourish. =" Equality as the Ba'
sis of Good Society,"" by W. d. Howells
in Century.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
The Sacred and symbolic Palm.

From the very earliest times the palm
tree has been recognized as symbol OF
victory. Among the Greeks and the
Romans palm branches were used to
decorate the buildings and streets OF
their cities in honor Of the return OF
victorious army. This custom appears
TO have been taken from the eastern
nations, but from what one in particu-
lar no one now knows.
At very early age the Hebrews were
accustomed to carry palm branches ON all
occasions of rejoicings This custom
having been observed on the entry OF
Christ into Jerusalem, the tree has come
to bear special symbolism among
Christians. The primitive church used
it to express the triumphs of the Chris
tian over death through the resurrec-
ton. As early as the second century
A. d. it became the custom to carve
palm branches OH the tombstones OF
those who had died for the faith, and
about the same time all pictures OF mar
tyrs were figures holding representations
of palm branches in their hands. st.
Louis Republic.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
Weighing Silk.

Some improvements in the treatment
of silk are noted. Ordinarily silk is
"weighted'' by depositing tannate OF
tin on the fiber; the material receives
bath of fannie acid and then another OF
perchloride Of tin, repetition OF TINS
being made until an increase OF the
weight amounts to from 10 to 20 per
cent, beyond which it is not considered
safe to 90 in the case of silk intended to
be dyed light shades or to be bleached.
Recently German inventor has brought
forward process in which silica is the
weighing agent. In carrying out this
method three steps are described. First,
the silk, raw or in any stage OF manu-
facture and either before or after dye
ing. is worked for an hour in bath OF
perchloride Of tin; then, after squeezing
and washing it is worked in a warm
solution of water glass or soluble sill
cate of soda for about an hour, followed
by washing, having also been previously
passed through a solution OF phosphate
of soda. The operation may be repeated
again and again with no harmful effect
ON the fiber or OH the subsequent dye
ing, and in five operations the silk may
be increased in weight some 100 to l2o
per cent. The silk is now soaped, and,
if already dyed, is cleared in an emui-
sion of olive oil and acid. New YORK
SIM
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
Hard Work and Huxley.

A great part Of the work by which the
world knows him was done after dln-
ner and after hard days work In the
lecture room and laboratory. He never
shared himself. Often and often have 1
known him leave the circle OF family
and friends, of which he was the hfe'
very early in the evening and betake
himself to his library, room OF when
the only luxury was books. If remon-
strated with or appealed to for another
half hour, he would only shake his
head. There was something to be done.
And it would be midnight or ! or .
O'Clock before it was done, and then ne
was up at z in the morning.
I sometimes thought he had no hlgher
happiness than work; perhaps nobody
has He would dine OH little soup ana
bit of fish more than that was clog
ON his mind. 1.-THE great secret, ne
said, sis to preserve the power OF WORK,
ING continuously l6 hours day II neeo
he. If Won cannot do that, you may DC
caught out any time. ''-Scribner's Mag
azine
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
HIS GRAcE's susPeNoeRs.
Clever Ruse by Which welIington's Auto
graph Was Secured.

graph was Secured.
It is we'll known that toward the lat
ter years of the Duke Of Wellington's
life it was next to impossible to coax or
wheedle his autograph out Of him. All
the stratagems used to get reply from
him to letters failed; he either did not
answer them at all or directed his pri-
vate secretary to do so, and thus the ia
NOUS signature of wellington became
rarity highly priced by collectors.
Apropos of this Answers tells OF.
London lady who had an album gar
nished with the autographs of most OF
the great men of tho day, but wanted
that of the "Great Captain. She men
toned her distress to friend, certain
Mr.. H., and few days after he, to her
great surprise and pleasure, brought her
note from the hand of the victor OF
Waterloo. 1t ran thus:
"Field Marshal the Duke Of Yelling
ton never ordered pair Of braces OF the
Messrs. Simpkin. If +. M. the Duke OF
Wellington had ordered the articles, he
could not forget it. +. M. the Duke OF
Wellington always pays for his braces. >
This was very odd document for
lady's album, but its authenticity was
undoubted, and it therefore found the
best place in the interesting collection.
The way in which this singular note
| was elected was this:
Mr.. Fl. filed up one of the bankruptcy
court forms and signed it, informing
the duke that in winding up the affairs
of Messrs. Simpkin he (the assignee
found OH their books the sum of Us. 3D.
due by his grace for a pair of braces
which he requested the duke would I'm
mediately pay or have paid. Mr.. d. Z
ruse was founded OH pure fiction. but
cnOceedad
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
A PLAGUE or PARIS.
Tho Wild Dogs of tho Days of the Reign
of Terror.

of Terror.
So many startling events hapneucd
from day TO day during the reign of
terror that the apparition Of wild dogs
III Paris is commonly overlooked. Bus
1t was quite natural The greater part
of those grandees who fled or went in
to hiding kept dogs, and very few of
them were able to make any arrange
ment for the poor beasts wher they left
home
The dogs, abandoned, took to the
streets, OF course, and shortly they be.
gan to congregate in two packs, one &C.
cupylng the Champs Elysees and one
the Bots de Boulogne. Soon they became
a public danger. Carlyle pokes fun at
Santerre, the brewer, who proposed a
law that all dogs should be hanged; he
had not noticed the paragraphs in the
newspapers telling how people had been
attacked in the Champs Elysees.
At length the situation became really
grave, as is easily understood when
thousands Of starving animals have to
find subsistence in starving city. Many
of them were wolf hounds and of pow
erful fighting breeds. So in September,
1898, drastic measures were takei!
against the Champs Elysees pack.
Two battalions of the national guard
surrounded the area, leaving gap to-
ward the Rue Royale, while multitude.
| of ragamuffins beat the cover The game
was driven up the Rue Royale to the
Place Royale, where troops made bat
tue of it, firing volleys. Three days con
secutively this operation was repeated
and more than 5000 dead dogs lay il
the place.
A certain Gaspardin received orders
to clear them away, and he, short O
means, applied for the royal equipages
1t was timely jest, greeted with ap
plause So M. Gaspardin packed tn
dead dogs neck and heels in gilde'
coaches as full as they would hold ant
made state procession through delight
ed Paris. Pearson Weekly. (
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
IMPRESSIVE GLITTER.
The Metallic Splendor Of the Diplomatic
Corps on New Years Morning.

The Metallic SplendOr OF the Diplomatic
Corps on New Years Morning.
: Washington's most picturesque fea-
ture, the diplomatic corps, never gets IN
TO action until the reception at the
White House OH New Years day, al
though the individual members will be
seen out in society for q month or more
before the recognized social season. AT
the New Years reception, however, the
diplomats come out strong, and the pro-
cession of the members of the foreign
legations and embassies from the White
House to the home or hotel Of the secre-
tary of state, where the diplomatic
breakfast is served, is one OF the gala
sights of tho year. Many of the popula-
ton Of Washington stay up all night IN
order to get place on the White House
fence where they may see the procession
pass as soon as it has been received and
properly attended to by the president.
After. this reception the entire organi-
cation lines up and puts out on foot Tor
the home of the secretary of state. AS
thew pass from the White House grounds
in their glittering raiment they are the
sbowiest things in Washington and
worth coming miles to see. The lowll
est attache in the crowd will give cards
and spades to the most showily dressed
drum major in the country and Will VIII
out with ease. They have gold lace ant
bullion strung all over them, while thu
aigrets plumes, epaulets, cords. tassel.
and ribbons of any one legation would
stock millinery store. Such IS the Ell
feet of this aggregation Of beauty ant
valor on the great American Grove
gathered without the gates that ever.
man in it utters at some time while tn
procession is passing, with contemptu
GUS emphasis, the remark which occur
oftenest in the narrative OF the adven
lures of Chimmie Fadden.
lis Journal
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
AN EDITORS NIGHTMARE.
He Was Fifteen Years In SURPRISING an
Insistent Contributor.


The former editor of The Scotsman,
when he retired to enjoy his we'll earn
ed leisure, gave Alexander Russell this
advice, "The conduct of daily paper,
he said, sis always very serious thing,
full of dangers and difficulties. but in
addition to its usual anxieties you, my
friend, will every night have to keep
the most vigilant watch lest that man
Hill Burton should contrive to insert
his theory about Scotch cheeses into
your columns.
1t is not necessary to particularize
what it was; it will suffice to say that
this theory-based upon the exposure OF
Scotch cheeses i'll front of the shops, and
the treatment to which they were con-
sequcntly exposed-was not comph'
mentaly or likely to recommend them
to the purchaser.
ebay AMI night" said Russell, "for
Is years, never forgot my predeces-
sor's warning. A hundred times that
theory endeavored to gain admittance
into my columns, and by most unlocked
for channels; sometimes it lurked con-
cealed in an article about the Crimean
war, sometimes in one Of the divorce
cases, sometimes in one on the division
of the Free church in Scotland. or even
in the disruption itself; but it was al
ways detected and struck out.
| at was duel to the death, for
knew that Hill Burton would never re-
lax his efforts, to get his views upon
Scotch cheese into print while there was
breath in his body. On the morning OF
the last day of the fifteenth year he ran
into my office waving paper in hii
hand and crying out, It's in, it's in!
"'What, cried l, mot in The Scots
man surely?' 80 500 a.. 2
"'No, said he. in Chambers "Infor
nation For the People.
my relief of mind is not to be'de
scribed. Pearson Weekly.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
o.. NJ Fields Franks.

A story that has been written aDou.
rs;oId concerns the trick he played Oh
two car loads of Kansas City merchants
who went away one time ON an excur.
sion Each car was to 90 by diiferen1
ronte and the cars separated at an early
honr in the morning when everybody
was asleep. except Gene Field, who was
along to write up the trip 'us fused all
the cars parted company ne CARR. lie, %"
the shoes from one sleeper mo 'n III o" ha
and carefully exchanged them. . tn.I hnd I'D
took the shoes from the sleeper 'n"' ; nso
a double supply and carried .nein LIZ, ,n,'
the sleeper where nobody had any sI h1ne
The next morning there was 49, sv
streak two ways across Kansas: n' "a
man v' in both sleepers was miles anu
niles away from his own shoes
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
Matching Eggs on a Fire Engine.

A good story is told concerning the
members of the fire brigade in certain
town not far from Hastings. On one oc-
casion it appears fire brooks out in the
town, and rush was naturally made
for the fire engine, which was always
kept ON the premises Of one OF the in
habitants. When the men attempted to
take the engine out, however, they were
met with the exclamation from the GUS
todian:
"Hil We can't take that out I've got
a hen sitting ON there, and you'll break
her eggs. F"
Tradition AYERS that the men, seeing
the force of this argument, instantly
withdrew, and the fire was put out by
means of pals of water drawn from a
neighboring well.-Pearson's Weekly.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-03-03
rEssIMisrIc LAsoUcHERs.
re Thinks tho Principle Of Perversity
Governs All Departments of Life.

re Thinks the Principle OF Perversity
Governs All Departments of Life.
II has been observed from time i'm
memorial that curious perversity or
climate-so we have been accustomed
to consider it-generally provides ono
sort of weather to match precisely OPP
posite sort Of clothing. Thus walking
stick will generally attract rain and an
umbrella will produce sunshine.
Indeed the principle of perversity
governs every department OF life.
Should sunshine be necessary 1t will be
wet. Documents of no Importance are
never mislaid. We invariably meet the
people whom we are anxious to avoid
and miss those we especially wish to
meet A woman generally loses her
heart to the wrong man; man gener-
ally marries the wrong woman. Livery
one will be able to add to these exam
Piles almost indefinitely from personal
experience.
There are no accidents whatever in
life. Modern science has established
that every incident is governed by an in
variable law. Careful observation and
the study Of statistics prove beyond the
possibility Of doubt that clothes do very
materially influence weather, discov-
cry which should be invaluable not only
to the farmer, but to every member OF
the community.
Recent science, moreover, has erro-
neously adopted the theory Of the surviv-
al of the fittest. The primal law which
governs every circumstance OF life If
the survival of the unfittest. For In
stance, if man is to inherit fortune
from relative, the latter will survive
to extreme old age. In literature and IL
art the man of talent fails, the charlatar
attains fame. In finance and in com
merce the swindler makes a fortune ant
becomes fashionable, the honest man Il
driven into bankruptcy. An enemy j
sure to flourish. The pattern Sunda.
school boy is cut off in his youth; tn
truant grows to manhood, marries hap
PLY and dies respected and regretted b.
all. The worthy youth never Marie
the woman he loves; she marries nj
utterly worthless rival. London Truth