The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-08-04
WITH THE COFFEE.
@0O~ 5000 AS6YS 90.

Whats the meaning of these outland-
ISL figures?'
Four hundred and ninety-nine people out
of Ave hundred make this inquiry every
day in their mind as they pass the Hall
of Relics and the odd one will ask the
( policeman On the beat. Inc copper wall
! shake his head and recommend the in
J qui-er TO go over 10 the DeSeret News
/ office on the corner if he is hunting Tor
/ classics. Over there John James Will say
he mas been asked chat very same ques-
ton hundreds of times, and tomorrow ne
would look it up
/ is employed around the hall IN some ca
/ pac.ty and knows all about the pioneers
and their relics, has a very unique way
I Of explaining the NEUROLOGICAL figures
which Stand on eacn side OF DalEns
s.-t-e of Peace CUT on the Sidewalk
he will declatm:
strength. Century (centaur) IS - the
name, because Century is aft 'Orse, alt
man and this ere is alt hon and ali
woman. It's a name commencing with
c and sounds like cribbaSe-but OF course
tisn criE6age.
SINE Of those who have listened 10 the
Engi.s.lTnan may Forthwith hurE up
dictionary and look at every word and
It's meaning commencing WITH before
they give up in despair. But i 5 the cas-
lest thing n the world TO ma Il IN the
back part Of WebS-er's unabridged among
uae Psychological illustrations And IL
the stranger thing in the world why II
is not found in the latest classical dc
The name of the .'outlandish figure is
androSpnlnX, and Webster defines it as
"a man SPHINX sphinx having the head
CT man and abe Dody of hon The
word IS derived from the Greek
The dosing up of the Kelley Institute
not a believer IN the efipaev al his own
treatment, sends a shiver down the SPINE
OF those gradusEes from the jag cure col
lege VINO keE.l their piedges: Ilme was
when the Carlo House numbered among
its students z gOOdly array Of bright men
who flew 10 the gold treatment as their
only savior from a drunkard's grave.
man wh1 operated the hypode-E,sc
syringe knows When they were pro-
nounced cured the doctor called the
graduating class into his presence ami
solemnly warned them thar the nature of
blchlor.de ci gold was harmless in tESelt.
but if The drink habit succeeded she treat
menf the pro and anti-naXup would prove
disastrous and the man would fall down
dead
There were many horrible examples
IN those days whose pictures and teSti-
moniahs were printed in the newspapers,
ard many of the better class Of students
were so elated over their recovery that
of the-- coats One by one The horrible
examples found their way 20 the low
saloon and their accustomed places in f-le
ccy prison. One by one the brighter men
yielded TO the temptation urru only a
score of the Gardo crowd remain as an
example OF Will power over hUmbus- But
not one of them ever fell down dead
g g g
Ik's a wise man that does not get tan
gied up sometimes en- the tariff question.
For example a man with 10 cents IN MS
vest poci2sIt. straGdled stool at the lunch
counter in CaldeT's park the other day
Looking up at the price list Of eata5ieS
which STOOD OUT in bold relief on q sign.
he discovered that his dime would buy
a tiny ham sandwich, but no coffee, or a
cup of coffee, bur no sandwich, while
S-:ss cheese and sardineS were out of
sigh Just as ne was about 10 order the
So ndrv.cs. he saw at the bottom of the
sign Two hard boiled eggs. cents.
Throwing Down the dime ne was served
with two hard boiled eggs IN little sau-
Ger and -wO more Of the same kind IN
another little saucer, with the privilege of
reaching out and helping himself 10 salt
pepper and vinegar. When he finished a
square meal off 10 GEMS, ne remomS ered
reading up in a congressional debate on
the tariff mat this country imported from
China las year 126o0.0O0 eggs, but the
Chinaman paid no tax. He is now Won
def-sng where thu ad valOrem comes in on
eggs, wlsile ham sandwiches cant be
found in either schedule II or schedule 5.