davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
On Ships Beds.

The Arundel Castle is the finest boat
I have seen in these seas. She is thor
oughly modern, and that statement COW
ers great deal of ground. She has the
usual defect, the common defect, the
universal defect, the defect that has
never been missing from any ship that
ever sailed-she has imperfect BEDS
Many ships have good beds, but no ship
has very good ones. In the matter Of
beds all ships have been badly edited,
ignorantly edited, from the beginning.
The selection Of the beds is given to
some hearty, strong backed, self made
man, when it ought to be given to a
frail woman accustomed from girlhood
to backaches and insomnia. Nothing is
so rare on either side of the ocean as a
perfect bed; nothing is SO difficult to
make. Some of the hotels on both sides
provide it, but no ship ever does or ever
did. In Noah's ark the beds were sim
ply scandalous. Noah set the fashion,
and it will endure in one degree Of mod
ification or another until the next food.
Following the Equator" by Mark
Twain, in McClure's. =
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
Feeding q Baby Elephant.

-
In St. Nicholas F. Fitz Roy Dixon
tells Of baby elephant that was cap.
tured by friends of his in Ceylon, after
the death Of it's mother. Mr.. Dixon says:
When Sidney was first brought over,
virtually in order that she might be
fed, the question naturally arose as to
how she would take her nourishment.
Of course the proper way for an adult
elephant to take in water is by means
of the trunk, which is furnished with
two tubes running it's whole length.
But when a bowl of milk was placed
before the baby elephant she did not
know what to do with it. She dipped
the tip of her trunk into it, and the
lockers on thought that there would be
no difficulty about her drinking at all,
since she recognized the scent of the
nourishment she had been accustomed
to. But she was quite at a loss and sci
up roar which seemed quite natural
under the circumstances. Then some
one suggested pouring it down hel
throat from a bottle, and this was &C.
cordingly tried, and after one or two in
efectual attempts she understood.
She was half starved when this wal
done, for she had had nothing to cal
since the death Of her mother, and he1
delight at being fed was most amusing
The only trouble was that it was diff
cult to satisfy her, and it was feared
that the change of diet would disagree
with her, but fortunately it had no il
effect.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
OUR OWN.
I had known in the morning

II had known in the morning
How wearily all the day 5s e.
The words unkind would trouble my mind
That said when you went away.
had been more careful, darling,
Nor given you needless pain,
But we vex our own with look and tone
We may never take back again.
For, though in the quiet evening
You may give me the kiss of peace,
Yet it well might be that never for me
The pain Of the heart should ceasei
How many go forth at morning
Who never come home at night!
And hearts have broken for harsh words
- spoken
That sorrow can meier set right.
We have careful thought for the stranger
And smiles for the some time guest,
But oft for our own the bitter tone,
Though we love our own the best.
All, lips with the curve impatient.
. In, brow with the shade of scorn,
'Twere cruel fate were the night too late
To undo the work of the morn!
Margaret E. Sangster.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
THE MOUNT AIN MAID.
She Had : Natural Anxiety, which She
Made Manifest. 81;

She Had . Natural Anxiety, Witch She
Made Manifest. a
AS my horse, putting like porpoise,
Few me and my buck board up the last
sharp activity Of the mountain road
that led out into the pass between the
SUBMITS rising on either. hand he would
have exercised his privilege and stopped
moment to blow, but 100 yards ahead
of us saw a bright bit Of calico CLEAN
ing in the morning sun, and, driving on,
I came up to buxom mountain maid
sitting on q stump at a point where a
footpath leading up from the valley
met the main road. ,s..s
Good mornin," she said before I
had chance to stop, and there seemed
to be an anxious tone jim the voice. =
'sGood morning." ! responded, and /
was on the point of asking her how far
it was to the next place, favorite man
ner Of starting conversation on noun
tain roads, when she broke in.
Air you preacher?'' she asked.
Ono, answered, with smile, for
had never been asked that question be-
fore.
Nor squire?'' .
"No.''
"Well, Jim Martins comm along
this away purity soon now, an I wuz
jis' akin SOS thar wouldn't be no mis-
takes" go .3s
~ don't quite understand your ex.
planation,'' I said, completely in the
dark as to what she was trying to get at.
II reckon not, but amt takin nc
chances, an thought I'd better stop
you while had the chance"
"Thank you, I'm sure, but if you
will tell me what's up may be able to
know what you are talking about
She laughed good naturally. -
''Well, you see it's this away" she
said. Jim, he's been a-courtin an
a-sparkin round me fer about two ye'1
now, an last night he popped an says e.
how eff I'd be here this mornin ez he
come along we'd go down to Logville
an git hitohed, an Jim's mighty onreli.
able, an likes not eff we got thar an the
preacher ner the squire warn't thar I'd
never git Jim in the mind ag'in, so
kinder thought mebbe you might be the
squire or the preacher an didn't want
you to git away. Eff you meet Jim any
where's down the road, don't tell hin
you seen me, fer I don't want hin
skeert. "-Washington Star.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
Clever Man.

It is said of contributor to some Of
the comic papers of the day that his
wit shines more brightly in his speech
than in his copy rs ..:
What a clever man that Tompkins
is, : he said lately to an acquaintance,
referring to q well dressed, ordinary
looking man who had just passed him
with q bow.
'tClever!'' echoed the other. Why,
I never heard of his saying or doing
anything!'' .55
That's just it, = returned the writer
gravely. Think Of his being able to
live without sayifig or doing anything.
I couldn' t. = Youth g Companion.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
His Bluff.

When the young man called to ask
for the old mans daughter, the latter
naturally thought it was necessary to
put up good bluff, that being the usu-
al method of procedure. Consequently
he looked solemn, coughed once or twice
as sort of preliminary, communed with
himself minute or two, ,coughed again
and asked:
"Can you support her in the style to
which she has been accustomed?'
eff I couldn't, = returned the young
man promptly, I ought to be ashamed
of myself. :" 5 r...iS ,, 4. . 5s
The old man bluff was called. Chi
cago Post.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
IMPORTANT CHANGE In TINE VIA
NICKEL PLATE Road.

NICKEL PLATE ROAD.
Commencing Sunday, Nov. 18th, the
New York & Boston Express will leave
Chicago at 10 rs A. NJ. instead of 10: 36
A. NJ. as formerly. The New York s.
Eastern Express which formerly left
Chicago at 8 :05 P. NJ. will leave at 200
P. NJ. The evening tram will leave at
1915 P. M, as heretofore.
The same high standard of through
train service will DO maintained as prior
to Nov. 18th, with the advantage to
passengers leaving Chicago on our 200
T. NJ. which will afford through sleep
ing car Accommodations to Boston, reach
ing that city at 10: 80 the following eve
ming. All the delicacies of the season
will be served on Dining Car.
For full information in regard to train
service, call on or address J.Y. Callahan,
Genl Agent, III Adams St., Chicago.
Ill. 81. Thorne, c. P. & T. A.
COMMENCING SUNDAY, Nov. 14TH,
trains via the Nickel Plate Road will
leave Chicago as follows: Train which
formerly left Chicago at 10 :35 q. N. will
leave at 10 :25 a. M; No. 6 will leave at
2 100 p. m. instead of 8 :05 p. m. and win
afford through sleeping car accomoda-
tions to Boston, arriving in that city at
10 80 p. m. the following day. The eve.
ming train will leave at 1915 as former
~. All coaches in charge of colored
porters and Dining Car service une1-
celled. Every facility for the comfort
Of the travelling public. Rates lower
than via other lines. ]. Y. Callahan,
GenI Agent, Ill Adams ST., Chicago,
Ill. H.Thorne, C.P. & ia. III Adams
ST., Chicago, I'll. s ..5s
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
ABOUT THE WEATHER.
MI. Wingleby Explains to George Abo'
tho Seasons. w..

MI. "1ngleby Explains to George About
tho Seasons. ..--
"You see, George" said Mr.. Win
gleby, whose youthful son had asked
him how we came to have different
kinds Of weather, 1.-The weather is put
up in tin cans, days weather to a
can, and usually they put up about a
years supply ahead, enough to last
through spring, summer, autumn and
winter. In filling the cans they sort it
all out as we'll as possible. Sometimes
when they get a can full there may be a
little left over, and whatever remains
in this way they throw into one lot.
When they've got pretty nearly all the
cans full and the regular stock of wealth
er has run out, they fill up from that
lot of odds and ends. The cans so filed
contain what is called variable weather,
because it's mixed, but most of the
weather they get pretty well sorted out
according to the season.
"When they've got all the cans filed,
they stack 'em up where they'll be
handy to get at, and there's a man that
does nothing but open them. Every day
he cuts can and pours out the weather
for that day, and of course great deal
depends upon him. Sometimes this man
gets careless and pulls down a lot of the
wrong cans, getting them, say, from the
July shelf in the month Of April and
likely as not getting down week
supply at once, so as to have them handy
on the opening table, OF course he dis.
covers his mistake the first can he opens,
but he is too lazy to put the rest back,
and so he keeps on then until he has
opened them all, and that's how il
comes about, as it sometimes does, that
we get hot spell at a season when w
ought to have nothing but cool weather:
"But Of course those April cans ar
not lost. They must be around some
where, and we get 'em later. Maybe
the man will sprinkle them along witt
the hope that we won't notice then
much, but as likely as not he open,
them one after another together, 1naybt
after some terribly hot, spell in July o.
August, when they are sure to be {
blessed relief, and if he does this we ar,
pretty apt to forgive him his mistake il
April. louisville Courier Journal.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
a BACHELORS QUARTERS.

Nothing HOmeltko About Them, Accord.
ing to the Married Mans Story.
They hadn' t met since the old college
days, ten years before, and Of course the
benedict insisted that the bachelor
should come home to dinner with him.
Married the year after I left col
lege, 4 he said, .and I have the incest
little home and the finest lot Of young.
sters that you ever saw. want you to
come out and see how nicely I'm fixed.
I tell you man doesn't know what
life is until he's married. Il
SHOP 4
well, I should say not. =
And SO it happened that the bachelor
went with the benedict and met the
latter's wife and played with his chill
dren and made himself generally useful
and popular until they were all seated
at the dinner table.
It was over the coffee and cigars, aft
er the benedict s wife had left the table,
that the benedict finally suggested:
pretty comfortably fixed, ain It I, old
man? Children, why don't you go into
the other room?'' -. =s
every nicely, indeed,'' answered the
bachelor, replying to the first question
and ignoring the second.
ooh, there's nothing like home life, -
went on the benedict. willie, stop
trying to climb on Mr.. Browns knee.
He wants to smoke. Do you know, old
man, I laugh when I think of my fool
ish idea that I knew in those old days
what happiness was. Why, a man
doesn't begin to live until Maggie,
put that nutpick back on the table.
You'll jab it in your eye the first thing
you know. Yes, sir. I actually have
to laugh when I think Of it. Our idea of
contentment in those days was to get a
pipe and book and bottle of Scotch
and lock the door and lie down and
Would you mind moving your coffee
cup little farther back on the table,
old man? Tommie's trying to reach it,
and my wife would raise my scalp if ]
should let him break one Of her very
best cups. That's it. Thank you. As !
was saying, we didn't know what ease
and contentment was in those days. No
single man does. A man has to have q
big armchair and his slippers all ready
for him and everything sort Of restfu]
and quiet before Now, don't cry, Ma.
bel. IF you didn't want to get hurt,
why did you grab the end Of my cigar!
Tommie, take her in to her mother.
There, Willie, I told you you'd stick
that nutpick into your hand if you
didn't look out. Run, into the other
room and ask your mother to put 9
bandage on it. Let's see, where was I,
old man? Oh, yes, I remember now.
was about to say that there's nothing
homelike about bachelor quarters
mo-" interrupted the bachelor, with
considerable emphasis, "there isn't.''
| The benedict couldn't quite see thu
reason for such an emphatic assertion
but he wisely changed the subject, JUS
the same. Chicago Post. E-.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01

Smoking in Germany is not pas
time. It is an art, and an art that has
grouped about it respectable number
Of industries. Every smoker carries q
cigar case, cigar clipper, matchbox
and usually q little leather box for the
cigar tips The tips are collected By 8
society organized for the purpose ii
each province and are sold to the manu-
facturer for the benefit of charitable in
situations ~ s555 III Is s55
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
SAVING UP A LOG.

How Planks Are Cut Into shape In q
Great Western Sawmill.
w. s. HARDWOOD contributes "The
Story of a Pine Board'' to St. Nicholas
After telling of the cutting down of the
tree and it's progress from the forest to
the mill Mr.. HARDWOOD says: ~.
Up from the yellowish brown depths
Of the slow moving river flowing so
steadily on it's way to- the sea comes a
huge, dark brown thing with shining,
dripping coat. 1t is our log, entering
upon it's last stage. It passes at once up
a long incline called the "slit''-a
trench of wood about eight inches deep
and two feet wide at the top, SO hol-
lowed out that the largest log will lie
in it securely as it is being drawn up
the incline by the stout chains with
which the slit is. equipped. Projecting
pieces Of steel on this chain serve to
keep the log steady, it's great weight,
causing it to sink upon these pieces of
steel, which are like sharp teeth. A
workman, standing at the side. Of the
slit, by means Of lever throws up two
powerful steel pointed arms, which lift
the logs out Of the slit and throw them
upon tables, from which they are rolled
down to the carriage which leads to the
saws. When the log reaches the car
riage, it is thrown upon the framework
by the niger "a long, ratcheted tim
Der or piece of steel. This framework is
like section Of an ordinary fat car
running on q regular railroad track.
Two men stand on the moving carriage
and at signal from the head sawyer,
who directs the cutting Of the log, reg
ulate the thickness of the plank or board
by the levers Of the carriage.
When the log has been adjusted, it
rapidly advances to the saw, and in a
very few seconds it's water soaked sides
have been trimmed by the sharp teeth.
The carriage flies back to the starting
place with the swiftness of the wind,
and it is enough to make one shudder to
see it go. You expect every instant that
one of the men will be thrown off and
terribly injured. They learn to balance
themselves, however, though there are
frequent accidents. One instant of mat
tention on the part of the head sawyer,
who regulates the speed of the carriage
by his lever, would send the carriage
flying back to the end Of the mill with
tremendous force and probably kill both
of the men. One of the men on the car
riage, called the 'setter,' - fixes the
width of the board to be sawed on sig
nal from the head sawyer; the othe1
man is the second sawyer.
As I stood one day in one of these
mills, watching the men flying forth
and back on the narrow carriage, ant
almost expecting that one or both O.
them would be thrown off in the swift
ness Of their fight, took out my watcl
and timed them, and found that the.
travelled on an average on this littl
railroad not more than 30 feet long
1853, 900 feet day, or about 81 miles.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
The Ra.cal won.

\ What's the price Of these gloves?''
she asked 5s
"a dollar and seventy-fve cents, =
said the clerk; "but I'm afraid we
haven't any small enough for you. We
can order an extra small size, however. "
.Oh, these will do. I'LL take three
pairs. - Chicago News.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
It's Usefulness.

Mrs. Newlywed That is our new
burglar alarm. You see, If q burglar
should get into the lower part Of the
house, that would ring.
Her Mother-Oh, and scare him Of?
Mrs Newlywed {doubtfully Well,
it might, but it would give Clarence
and me plenty Of time to hide in the
attic anyway lick Ne Up.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01
Two 4 U..efu, !. Iltens.

Half lennon makes 8 very good sub
stitute for = bar Of toilet soap, and an
orange, cut il half and rubbed on g
ssooty kettle, makes very good shoe
sblacking, which takes q fine polish.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01

Whistling is tabooed IN the dressing
rooms OF 8 circus That It is an III
omen is one Of the superstitions % the
circus people. Somebody is sure to be
discharged i any che whistles, they
say.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-12-01

More than 1 !. 600, 900 yards q tweed
are used annually for clothing the male
population of London alone.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1897-01-15
THE EGISAND INTELLIGENCER.
BEL AIR, ND, JANUARY IS, 1897.
~ IPPLE PROBLEM.

Once upon n time there were two
old men who sat in the market early
every morning and sold apples. Each
one had 50 apples, and one of the old
men sold two for IL cent and the other
old man sold three tor a cent. In
that way the first old man got 10 cents
for his basket of apples. while the
second old man received 10 cents, so
that together they made p cents
each day. But one day the old
man who sold three for IL cent was too
sick to go to the market and he asked
his neighbor to take his apples and
sell them for him.
This the other old man kindly con
scented to do. and when he got to the
market with the two baskets of APP
pies he said 70 himself. Il viii put all
the apples into one basket, for 1t will
be easier than picking them out OF
two baskets" So he put the 60 APP
piles Into one basket. and he said TO
himself. Now, If sell two apples for
a cent. and my old friend sells three
for a cent. that is the same rs selling
five apples for two cents" When he
had sold the 90 apples he found he
had only p cents, which was right be
cause there are - tiveS in go, and
twice u are 81 But if the other old
man had been there and each one had
sold his apples separately, they would
have received - cents. Now, how Is
that explained.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1897-01-15
Growth of the Tourist system

The Pennsylvania Railroad Company thro
its persona iy-conducted tourist system and
the unexcelied standard OF bjXh service has
won an unViablc record ritSC3. These tours
have grown to be thoroughly appreciated III
this age OF luxurious travel. ana Tx Srrtch an
uOunced for the season OF :i6 and 81 tdlnlrl-
blv illustrates the progress Of the times.
First comes Il series of the Golden Gate start
ing from New York, Philadelphia and Harris
burg January %, February 2l, and March -,
Tourists will travel by superhly-appOIntcd
speci&i trains of Pullman com pant mcnt. draw
ing-roOrn sleeping. dining, smoking and Obscr.
Yation cars, under the SuperNiS on OF Il Tourist
Agent and Ch3perOn.
Next i'll importance comes 4 series OF tour to
FI2rha-January -, February and %, and
March 81. The first three admit OF two weeks
in the sunny South. while tickets for the fourth
tour are good to retura by regular trains until
May 81.
4 series of short tours 10 Washington from
New York Philadelphia and adjacent points
will hc ran on December 30, 1896, Jauuary = /
February II, March II, April / and ~, and
May IS. 1897.
Old Point Comfort, Richmond and Washing
ton tours will leave New York and PEiludCl-
| pkia December 26, 1896. January u, February
"a March Is. and April 10 1897
Handsome illustrated itineraries viii be is
sued w the Peun> yiNaniu Railroad Company
containing full information is 10 now these
tours may lie pleasantly and proiitahiy MADE
These itineraries may he procured on personal
application or bS addressing Tourist Agent,
l 1876 broadway, New ork; $50 Fulton street
BROOKLYN: 7S9 Broad street. Newark, n. j., VI
Room All. Broad Street Station, Philadelphia.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1897-01-15
Tours to Florida.

No district in America presents, during the
Winter season, so many varied attractions as
| the State of Florida. Besides its delightful
climate, which to one escaping from the cold
and unhealthful changes of the North seems
almost ethereal, it is pre- eminently a land oil
sport and pleasure. Along it eleven hundred
miles of salt water coast and in its twelve nun
bred fresh water lakes are fish of almost every
conceivable variety, from the migratory tribes
common TO Northern waters to the tarpon
pOmpanO, and Others OF more tropical CHAR
Heter. Nowhere in all our broad land can the
angler find greater variety of game or better
sport.
| iere also the most enthusiastic hunter finds
safety Deer, turkeys, bears, pantherS, and
wild cats roam AT large through the more
sparsely settled regions, while birds OF all kinds
| may be found III abundance through ut Tire
State. The more novel sport of alligator and
manatee hunting may also be INDUCED i'll 10y
the more adventurous tourist
With its matchleSS climate, Its orange groves
its rivers and lakes, its boating and bathing, it,
| fishing and hunting, and its extensive forests
| Florida presents unrivaled attractions for the
ValetudiDarian. the lover OF nature, the sports
man, and the explorer.
To this attractive State the pennsylvania
Railroad Company has arranged four person
alfy-couducIed tours during tine season OF ! So
leaving by special train January 2G. February
! . and D. and March 8. The first three tours
will admit of sOiourn Of two weeks in this de
lightfuI land: tickets for the fourth tour will
be valid to return until May 81 by regular
trains.
Rates for the rount trip, $50 from New York
SIS from Philadelphia, and proportionAte rates
from other points.
For tickets, itineraries, and other informa'
ton. apply to ticket agents, special booking
Offices or address George w. Boyd, Assistant
Gen raj Passenger Agent, Broad Street station
YhjlalelDhiu
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1897-01-15
VARIETIES.

If it weren't for pug dogs girls
would get kissed more:
Babies are always emitting teeth,
or else it collie or something.
People who know most about love
are the ones who never had il.
Don't think woman has to have
"a nice foot because she wears Il pref.
~ shoe.
Look at it this way: The world
and everything in it is yours TO help
YOU make true man of yourself.
If we are unsympathetc and self
fish. we exclude ourselves from many
of the greatest and purest joys OF lie.
The man who is a slav2 to sin now
little further on in his career will be
likewise IA slave of sorrow that shall
be without end.
Cultivate the habit of always see.
ing the best in people, and, more than
that, of drawing forth whatever is
the best in them.
Its pity woman can't ever be
satisfied with marrying herself with.
out doing every thing she can to get
some other poor girl in trouble.