Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1897-04-01
When Students Don't Know.

Medical students are i'm the throes
OF examination time, or are enter
ing upon the anxious period preced-
ing their appearance before examin-
ers, who are to decide their fitness
for graduation. During this period
OF anxiety, when minds are strung
up to their highest tension, ludi-
crous slips are frequently made in
answering questions propounded by
the examiners.
Some of these mistakes may be
appreciated only by the questioners,
or those familiar with technical de-
tails of the subjects with which
their questions deal. Others, how
ever, may be appreciated by the lay
men, as the answer of a student that
that " music" is secreted by certain
glands in the throat. He meant, no
doubt, to say mucus, but many will
think he was not far from wrong,
especially in regard to some throats.
"TO strain the blood" is a COM
mon answer to the question concern
ing the function Of the liver.
One young man, in the course of
examination, in answer to a ques-
tiOn as to what disease the liver is
most liable, wrote oliver complaint" )"
Usually it is the freshmen in med
ical studies who make the most Seri-
Gus blunders in their answers. They
are unaccustomed to the mode Of eX-
animation, and for the nonce lose
self-possession, if they are not actu-
ally ignorant of the proper answer.
Rather than make complete funk
some answer is written down, and
this gives the examiner relief from
the monotony of looking over end
less pa pers.
"Give an outline of how the bony
framework of the body is built up,
and name some of the moro impor-
tant bones," was the question put to
a student.
The bony framework of the
body is built up to protect the vital
organs" was the comprehensive an
swer. Then he added: "Some Of
the more important bones are skull,
back, shoulder, hip, and collar
bones"
A more advanced student returned
from examination of baby patient
and reported that the little one was
" emancipated." When asked what
was meant by that term he replied
in Bowery parlance. "The baby
has tin ting" (thin thing.) The
patient died of lack of nourishment,
or inanition, and the report of the
would-be med;co was that the cause
of death was ammunition"
"What is the Office and use of the
brain in the human anatomy, and to
what diseases is it most liable ?" was
n double barrelled question pro-
pounded by an examiner. The
terse answer of the student was:
"Seat of intelligence, apopleXy,
fever"
a question in an examination on
materia medica was " What is an
Alternative" Almost laconic was
the answer, "A change for the bet
ter"
"A change produced with the aid
of chemicals" was the answer to the
question, Define ch @ IN i C
change" Define the term decom-
poSition," was asked student in
chemistry, and he replied, In state
of decay"
Containing iron and sulphur"
was the strange answer professor
received to his question, " What is
an antipyretic?" or, a drug to allay
fever.
One bright youth was asked what
hn "A hn
patient who was sure to die. "I'd
turn the case over to another physi-
cian," was the ready response.
A similar question was asked Of
another student, who replied: 81
would have to let him die, sup
pose"
One of the unsolved questions in
medicine was asked another student.
" Well, DECLARE" he replied Its
too bad. l know that perfectly well.
but it has slipped my memory just
at this time"
"That's a great pity" responded
the examiner, "for you are the only
man who ever discovered the solu-
ton of that problem. Try to re-
member it,"
Such answers would not have been
out Of place i'm the time of John
Wesley, the founder Of Methodism.
He was the author of a book called
" Primitive Physick," for ministers
in his time we're bodily, as we'll as
spiritually, healers. Some of the
prescriptions In this volume, which
went through six editions, will bear
repetition. For violent bleeding
at the nose a piece of white paper
was recommended to be placed un-
der the tongue.
To swallow pint of warm ale,
with an infusion distilled from warts
taken from horses leg, was the
proper treatment for cancer of the
breast. Consumptives were directed
to breathe for fifteen minutes each
morning in hole cut fresh in the
turf.
A pint of salted water was the
sovereign remedy for apoplexy..-
Poultices of toasted cheese were
quite the correct thing for cuts. For
cold in the head was recommended
orange-peel thrust up the nostrils.
AT THE late Republican Conven-