Lincoln County leader. [volume] (Toledo, Lincoln County, Or.) 1893-1987, 1897-01-21
F[A{HEI;Ia,ZEkKiEJy !'Ilil !,
q ia W sg12~'''
"Tll not be engaged to orv r y
en-, Less a sc solitaire he will bring.
She was 20 then, she's 30 now.
She'd accept most onv olI Io.'

NCoHSOllngly)-No
mortal is perfect, dearest. II"
Mr.. Savery-What. Retrimmin, ,,
last years hat! You are an onco,, ,,u' ~
savery-An angel. am l? Wen tsaa
give me $40 to buy wings.
"Have Scribbler the author oDan,
wife made up?' "Oh, yes. She uoS @
reads what he writes and he eats vS., VII"
she cooks."-Fliegende Blaetter
"Well, now that you are back Won
can tell us how much it costs IN a: -.
Europe" "All you've got and ali Won
can borrow over there Judge
Dabney-Glibney started on A cpptD,,
run to-day. Babley-Where has h.
gone? Dabney-After the fellow WIN
stole his wheel.-RoXbury Gazette
"By the way, how did that schema
you went into pan out-the one tn rot
sugar out of beets?" I'VE got beat ont
of the sugar."-Cincinnati ENQUIRER
The story about a pretty girl kiss.
ing burglar by mistake is all WRONG
and should be suppressed. 1t il an
incentive to crime.-Chicago Post
Miss Scraggs-Yes; once when was
out alone on dark night, | saw man.
and, oh, my goodness, how ran! "And
did you catch him, Miss Scraggs?"
when l get into my new house
mean that everything shall 20 like
clockwork. 81 see; the same as here.
tofore; tick, tick. boston Transcript
Truth crushed to earth will rise again.
When comes the proper juncture,
While error, wounded, writhes in pain,
And can't repair her puncture
indianapolis Journal.
If Eve hadn't tempted Adam with
that apple, what would the modern tai.
lOrs, milliners and dreSsmakers be do.
ing for living now?-SOmerville Jour.
nal.
And what do you regard as the
greatest triumph of modern surgery
collecting the bills" promptly re.
sponded the great practitioner-ChL
cago Record.
First Tramp-That old feler what
wuz givin' me der lecture said he didn't
know de taste O. liquor Second Tramp
Well. dat's some excuse fer him talk
in de way he did.-Puck.
One MatrOn-Since | have been mar.
ried | have taught my husband good
taste. Alphabetically? 1t is good
thing for you that you did not teach
him before you were married.
Did old Grumpey make much Of
kick when you asked him for his daugh'
ter?" Did he make much of kick!
The doctor says | am threatened with
curvature of the spine. Detroit Free
Press.
"Hark! cried the long-haired masa.
zine poet, chow the people cheer me
how they recognize genius You're
mistaken" whispered his wife. "rhey
think you are Il football player. AT
lanta Constitution.
Father-It was strangely quiet in the
parlor while that young fellow was call
ing last evening, Edith. Daughter-
Yes; he's one of the U. of NJ. tacKes
and seems to think Of nothing else
Detroit Free Press.
I'm putting up prescription lot
your wife's milliner," said the drug
clerk to his employer. what Shall
charge herr" "What is the usual pree
for what she is getting?" Fifty cents
"Charge her $2.75."-TeXas Sitter.
Mrs. Digby has a husband that re,
ally thinks something of her. "Wna'
has he doneY "Why, instead OF DeV
ting to win hat on the election iol
himself he bet Il new bonnet lof HE
wife. Chicago Record.
81" he shouted, impassionedly iron
the rostrum. 81 shall begin at ohce - y
the noble work of crushing tyranss'
Then, after the storm of applause na,
n
ceased, he went home and tried 10 HAS
the hired girl.-Cincinnati enquirer
"How do you like the new ieau,n,
lady you have, Footlites" "she WIN 'a
do at all. She's only been uiai,.t' .s
twice, and hasn't had any dlainOuu ",
stolen for a year. She's got no en,, n,o
gy at all."-Cincinnati Counie''''
Tribune.
Did you know" said the man "r w,
was reading an article about tne .,ot ~.
traction of metals, "that cloch ",h DM
faster in winter than summer .,o.,
never noticed that about wos, @
But know a gas meter does WI a''
ington Star. ,ceiy
Husband Ito wife)-I cannot CON- s.
what is the matter with my wal'r, ~,
think it must want cleaning Ipv,,o s"n
Child (breaking in)-Oh, father, nd uI
think it needs cleaning. Ban! ans ~,
81