Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1897-04-30
Wa5hingtpn Standard
A MISERABLE WIFE.


have 10 rent or sell the farm; my wife
l. so miserable. | cannot carry it on
without hiring. and hiring eats up all
the profits
| looked at the speaker admiringly.
He was about 30 years old, and as ro-
bust as man of 80 His whiskers
were neatly trimmed, showing a full,
red check. He wore a jaunty hat and
nattv cutaway coat, and below his vest
hung single fob and heavy gold seal.
/ was proud of him. He was such a
perfect specimen Of New York gen.
tlemen from the rural districts that l
wanted to imprint hi, picture on my
memory.
d" So your wife is miserable?"
eyes. Kinder dropping, with dry
cough and no ambition. She just
kinder drags around the house and
looks so peaked and scrawny it gives
me the blues. 1t does, swan"
Naturally weakly, wasn't she?'
"She! Oh, no. When 7 married
her, she was the smartest girl on the
creek. She used to work for my faith
er, and the way she made the work
stand around took my eye. She was a
poor girl and her industry got her a
rich husband"
Here he took out gold watch,
looked at the time, put it back and
adjusted the silk fob on the front of
his nicely fitting trousers.
$50 she did we'll, getting married
on account of her industry"
why, of course. She was getting
only $3.50 a week, and she became
mistress of farm"
Excuse me, but how much are you
worth now-confdentially, you know?
am a scientific man and will never
use such facts to your injury with the
assessor"
"Well, professor, could crowd $780,
600 pretty hard"
"That is good. How long have you
been married?"
"Thirty years next Fourth Of July.
We went down to Albany on little
teeter, and proposed the match and
Jane was willing"
"How much do you suppose you
have made in these 80 years?"
Hum-um-lemme see. got the
Davis farm the first ten years, then I
run in debt for the Simmons place, got
war prices for my cheese and squared
up both places. Well, I think have
cleared up $4,000 since we spliced."
every good indeed. And your wife
has been a great help all this timer"
"Oh, you bet! She was a RATHER!
She took care of her baby and the milk
from 20 COWS. I tell you she made
the tinware flop! Why, we have had
four children, and she never had a
hired girl over six months in that
time"
"Splendid, and you have cleared
$4,000 in that timer"
eyes, easy"
CHOW, how much has your wife
made?"
"she? Why, durn it, professor, she
is my wife,"
az know it. But what has she
made? You say she was poor when
you married her. Now, what has she
NADER"
"Why, you beat all! Why, she is
my wife, and we own it all together"
"Do you? Then she can draw on
your bank account? Then she has q
horse and carriage when she wants
them? Then she has a servant girl
when she wants one? Then she rides
out for her health, and has watch
and gold chain as you dor Is that so?"
Professor, you must be crazy. No.
body's wife is boss in that shape. Who
ever heard of such thing'"
"Now, look here. You say she did
we'll in marrying rich, and I cannot
see it. If she was getting $3.50 per
week when you married her and had
saved her wages, she would have had
now $500. If she had invested it,
she would have had $1,000. Now you
tell me she is broken down, used up
and miserable, and looks 80 badly she
makes you sick, and she has no money,
no help and will probably get nothing
but Scotch granite tombstone when
she dies"
Professor, if you was younger
man, l would lick you quicker'n a
spring lamb can jump thistle"
"What for? am stating this case
fairly, am l not? Your wife is no
longer young. She is no longer hand
some. Her hands are as hard as To-
cal editors cheek, and she has stopped
over a milk can until she has a hump
on her back like peddler."
"Shut up, will your"
"She has raised four children. One
of them is at college. One is taking
music lessons in Boston. The other
two are teaching school. She is at
home alone, going around in tread
mill life which will end in rosewood
coffin and a first-class country funeral"
"Stop that, professor, will your"
"While you are still handsome
man. with inst enough pray in yOur