St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1897-02-20


Weatherfords have sense and money
and most everything else exceptin fits.
He Chastised the Crosscut Saw.
J. It was on my return back from town
New Year day that i rid around by the
Neatherford place to change compile
meuts and swap lies and tobacco with
old man Bunk. Whilst ! was there julie
Nabors he come begin up to the front
eate with a crosscut saw on his Shout
ders. 1t would seem like old man Bunk
had loaned his saw to julie way last
fall, and from first one thing and then
another julie never could think to fetch
it back home. Finally at last the old
man had sent julie word that he would
love to borry his own saw for few
DAYS, and then julie he fetched it home.
Old man Bunk made out like he was
the proudast in the world to see julie
Majors that day, and nothin would do
but julie must come right in and take
q chair and &c seated and change his
breath with somethin a little more
stronger than branch wate-. Well, Of
course, julie was more than willin. and
the old man soon had him feelin power
full welcome and familious like.
And then what do you reckon? Old
man Bunk go: up and walked out to the
front gate where the crosscut saw was
leanin agin the palms. He shock his
fist at the saw, and took it vi, and boxed
its Jaws two or three times. Then he
went out to the orchard and cut him
good switch and came back and lit in on
that saw. For the next three minnits
he didn't do q blamed blessed thing but
give that old crosscut saw the ail-Over-
est beatin you ever heard tell of. And
between the ticks he likewise give the
saw some plain United States talk.
run off from home and stayed six
months, did your I Will learn you
better than that if 1 have to knock every
durn tooth you have got down your
throat"
Then the switch burnt the wind, and
you could hear the ticks on that old saw
for 200 yards around.
"Now. dad5urn you! The next time
you git away from home maybe you
will know the way back"
In the mainline broke loose and
laughed. did MORALLY hate to do SO
and julie right there. but it was laugh
or bust and didn't want to bust en- the
frst day Of the New Year. So laughed.
julie Majors he turned red and white
all over in spots. and locked like man
that was sent for and couldn't possibly
come across.
When old man Bunk had teliterally
wore his switch out or the saw he
snatched it up and yanked it under the
house, shook his double fist at it oncst
more and remarked:
"Now stay there, dadburn you, and
the next time let you go maybe yon
won't forget the road back home"
After that the old man cooled down
and come in smilin all over himself.
aud henceforwards he was as pleasant
as a basket Of chips to julie and me But
julie didn't tarry around and remain
over much longer. He soon made up
a good excuse and went of towards
home. s& = fE..S 1
Fresh News FROM Panther Greek.
And who do you reckon come to see
N on Saturday the first day after New
Year? Who but Aunt Nancy Newton
from Panther Creek. What did she
bring in the way OF Christmas and
New Year gifts? Nothin much to
speak of in that line. But she brung
her dear delightful old self, her thanky
bag and her pipe, and large assort-
ment Of fresh and scandalatious news
from the old settlement.
Now as to me, never did have no turn
to keep up with what Is goin on around
amongst the people in general. 1t takes
my level blamdest to know what is
comm to pass right around home, and
I don't have to 20 . henscratch from
the front gate to find more business than
my muttonhead and lily-whites hands
can tend TO. But when my Aunt Nancy
comes and throwS6R hef ny bonnet, and
lights her pipe, and puts her feet to
the fire, all. have got to do is to press
the button and then lay low and let
her do the rest.
"News l have got, Rufus. and news
ON top of news" says the dear old soul
that night after supper. Nobody sick
or dead or gone crazy SO fur AZ l know,
but everybody takin Christmas. and
margin and courtin and lallagaggin
and goin on to beat Bobtail.
"You never would of thought, know,
but IL left-handed Dunk Watson and
Dolly Wagner didn't sail in and git
married the next day after Christmas,
then Christmas didn't come at all and
amt here at Rocky Creek. You reco:-
lect, Rufus, there il old man Dunk Wat
son. and big Dunk and little Dunk, and
then, in orderment to know which from
tother, there is left-handed Dunk, and
10 = the youngster which has put in
al q . student to hangin his clothes
on the same pes with Dolly Wagner.
.Efom general outsids experiments
It would seem like Dunk and Dolly had
worked up . right tolerable bad casa
amongst themselves way last SPRING
which about that time they went to
school together over at Prosperity Hill.
She 10 right young thing, ~ you know,
Rufus, and he amt nothin bu, boy
II you 60 by the almanac and count up
the years on 'em. But you know some