The sun., 1897-12-12
"SAYNoTHING;SA WOOD"
SAGE ADTIoE OF THREE TYPH-
WRITER ORhCLEs.

0entin,enta1 Observation-Disclosures Runpteyeru
ne well ss Tiddiewink steEeGrs phors, and
There ousht TO Ne y schos, for Their TraipiuG
They were three little maids from school, but
good long way from school wero they. Neither
were they pert q schoolgirl well may be, nor
hllod to the brim with Eirlish giee. They were
not Japs; they were typewriter girls. Not OF
the species which desires to DO known as
"typists," but OF that rare variety which 10 ac-
auainted with commas and knows how to spell.
Perhaps they looked too much upon toe dark
eido Of thinEs II 10 to be hoped 30. Not 90
much on their own account, for they seemed
able to take care OF themselves; but on account
Of other little maids from school, tender type
writer buds. 30 to speak. OF a susceptibility COM
mon to their kind According to these three,
the typewriter buds must be prepared for both
frost and fire. OF tho two. frost 10 to be pre-
ferred, but one cannot always choose One can
only try to be ready for anything. These three
oraclea declared that tho Alpha ana the Omega
of every typewriter buds education should be,
Bay nothing and saw wood"
All Of this information. and much moro, was
the result Of q question which the reporter put
TO the oldest Of the three oraclea:
4, "Iisuppose you have your trials r. said the
reporter. invitingly.
"Trialsl" exclaimed tho trio In concert
"Can you tell me some Of your experiencesI
They opened their mouths with one accord,
then closed them with another. Then they
pursed up their lips into an expression
which plainly said that they were very shrowd
young persons and that they knew the time for
saying nothing we'll as the time for saving
wood. Said the oldest one finally:
You'll put 1t in the paper, and our employ
ers will read It. and" she kissed the tips Of her
hnRers and spread them apart" good.by to
usl"
"You' ra too mn usnicinus"
The whole trio clucked one melancholy cluck.
Perhaps" said the Oldest. Suspicion isn't
such bad thing. We need 1t in our business"
An ounce Of suspicion 10 worth O pound OF
repentance" said the youngest oracle. Being
the youngest, she had larger stock of worldly
wiso remarks than either of the others had.
"weve had experience and to spare" re.
marked the middle oracle, who rather pinsd for
speech. "Show me the typewriter girl who
hasn't had experiences and I'll show you"
=" The girl that's never had an employerl' said
the youngest emphatically.
80 We might tell you some things about the
employers we once had" said the oldest oracle
meditatively. The middle ono frightened up.
They agreed that this could do no harm.
"If were h man." said the Oldest, " and were
contemplating marriage, should pick out q
typewriter girl. Why Because I'd know that
she wouldn't expect me to be an angel or q hero
or an encyclopedia. She wouldn't faint II said
Damn and she would stand the smell OF to-
bacco Pmoke in the house without having sick
headache"
"Yes.' said the youngest oracle, land she
wouldn't crack q smile II her husband called
himself 'healthful' and tho house healthy
The typewriter girl knows what to expect of q
man in the line Of language"
"That's right" said the oldest oracle. "I had
an employer once who would persist in dio-
tating: AS usual, this house is notorious for
the quality of the goods offered suggested
that he say well known or Celebrated or al.
most any old thing rather than notorious. but
he assured me that he know his business.
ef tho goods offerea..' concluded that he did
Well" said tho middle oracle. "Td rather
have an employer who would stick to his own
would make me take the Responsibility and tho
suffering. ! had one Of that kind. He'd start
% aasFess M nfh fhsaanshss %sd
sisted On t9e Ts0e S m he'd e the
and ho always ended BY saying. Oh. well. tell
him we can't agree to his proposition or some.
thing Of that sort. according to tho circum.
s snd hed p a. rs
our address and the date and the Dear Sir just
as II 1t was something had never before heard
"I would put his directions into as business.
I didn't Away always bit Il on right Even il did
mako no mistakes, why there was always
,Sa ssp.n. to oq
fault or not, got the blame. No. stree! I'd
rather have an employer who would make
one who made me the scagegoat for all his ig-
noranee and SHORTCOMINGS"
as employers CO." said the Oldest oracle sadly
"but II you've never worked for a man plus .
sure what kind). you don't know what sorrow
Is; once thought wasn't getting enough pay
place. / received note asking me TO come TO a
certain downtown office Vt 10 o'clock the next
sented myself, for we soon learn. in our busi.
ness. that punctuRlity is worth moro than al
most anyhpF Th
low. I wouldn't have been willing to stay in
the Office with him for hundred dollars .
:" He began by asking me If l knew anything
about the business he was In: This business
fconfessed complete ignorance. He seemed to
resent this good deal. and appeared TO think
that an acquaintance with arlesian wells should
cluded to see what could do, however, In TAX
sias s s a. the side Dc Of his desk. gave W mo Single
sheet Of paper. an old stub OF pencil. and be-
ssoc Of St6
Well. then, you don't know all OF the hard things
The other two oracles shook their heads with
deepfeeing and fetched silnulta eous sigh.
The mans voice" resumed the oldest ora
which never seem to get out OF the lungs, but go
bounding back and forth inside OF the chest
until there is a perfect medley of sound. He was
bad enough in everyday English; but when ho
got into technical terms, Ia as soon have taken
dictation from the Bull of Bashan. We worried
along for a while, then he told me TO write out
what had written. | asked for a typewriter.
and he sent n boy TO dig one out of the Rsh bar.
rel, fancy, for II was so old and rusty that II
made as much noise as one Of his artesian well
drills at the height OF action.
"When had thnmped out what had writ.
ten, he looked IL over gloomily and said that II
was better than the rest had done. asked
him what kind OF work ho expected with such a
machine and such appliances. He didn't pay
any attention. but asked me II had ever taken
dictaton from graphophone. or whatever II
waA 1t seems that he liked to stay down there
in the evening when he felt like 1t and dictate a
lot of letters into this phone and have his
stenographer take them from 1t in the morning
He got the thing out, put the rubber tubes In
my ears, and turned on the machinery. WAS Ia
take the words directly upon the typewriter
Gan you imagine what his voice Was Ike whe1
1heArd IL via that 'phonei II had given money
tn hear ag a freak sound / should have felt