Vilas County news. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1896-1927, 1897-11-15
LovE-MAKING STATISTICS.
How the Young Man Tells the Story
To the Young Wn1r1an

How the 1Oun2 Man Tells the Story
to the Young Woman.
Statistics are at present being coll
lected on almost every conceivable sub
ject. What do you think of scholar
who has actually thought it worth his
while to collect statistics in regard to
the manner in which men and women
make love to each other? He has spent
| considerable time over this delicate
work and now at last informs the world
how the men, as a rule, propose to the
women, and how the women, as rule,
| accept the proposals of the men.
According to the scholar, the number
| Of young men who embrace their sweet
! hearts at the moment when they are
| inviting them to become their wives
| amounts to SO per cent. On the other
hand, 81 per cent. of the men IN love
kiss their sweethearts on the lips at the
critical moment, while per cent. show
er kisses on their hair and per cent.
content themselves with kissing their
hands.
At one time it was the fashion for
love intoxicated youths to fall on their
knees when about to make proposals
of marriage, but this fashion is evident
ly dying out, for we are assured that
| only per cent. of those in love at pres
ent fall on one knee, while only 2 per
cent. venture to sue for their ladies
favor on both knees. A curious reason
has been assigned for the decadence
Of this chivalrous custom, which is that
Of late years the neither garments Of
| males have been SO constructed that it
is rather risky for a man to flop down
suddenly ON his knees in lady's pres
ence. Garments, when strained, will
rip and tear, and no self-respecting low
er desires to have his act or alteration
turned into farce by any such cas-
ualty.
On the other hand WoOers OF to-day
seem to be far more nervous than the
gallant men who Wooed and won cen
tury ago. just fancy, 20 per cent. of
the lovers of to-day are aWfully ner-
vous when the decisive moment comes,
and in the throat of each mothers son
Of them there seems to be huge lump,
which it is impossible for them to Swal-
low. How they got over this difficulty
heaven only knows. Somehow the
lump disappears after they have strug
gled with it a minute or two, after
which it is to be hoped that their agony
is at an end.
The behavior Of the young women is
similarly remarkable. When the men
invite them to share their homes they
by no means all act alike. Eighty-one
out Of every hundred fall without a
word into the outstretched arms of
their chosen ones and so very easily
put an end to a rather embarrassing, IL
otherwise very delightful, situation; 60
per cent. blush very becomingly, and in
maidenly fashion shrink away as
though frightened at their companions
holiness; one out Of every hundred
possibly more, possibly less, says the
statistician-falls on a sofa as though
about to faint, and per cent are real
ly astonished at receiving proposals OF
marriage.
On the other hand eighty out Of every
hundred know very well what the men
have come for, and hence they are not
taken unaware, and they behave just as
they should behave on such a momen-
tous occasion. Furthermore, 60 per
cent. look their wooers boldly in the
eyes, evidently with the idea of still
further bewitching them, or of reliev-
ing them from their apparent embar
rassment. Curious facts these, but the
most curious fact of all is that one
maiden out of every hundred runs
away before the young man has finish
ed his pretty love tale, with the object
Of telling the good news to her girl
friends.