The Ocala banner. (Ocala, Marion County, Fla.) 1883-194?, 1897-12-24
AVER. PORTER AND THE COW

AVER. PORTER AND THE COW;
Or, How Aver Secured Railroad Pass.
To the Editor Of the Banner:
1t is a favorable sign when our legis-
lators begin TO search the musty rec
Ords of the past to find out how the
great statesmen " no framed our repub-
lie comported themselves. When they
begin studying the works left by these
great statesmen for posterity's guild
ance, and get SO imbued with the
democratic views and republican sim
plicity of the fathers that they begin
seeking the way our fathers trod, and
even show a strong desire to initiate
these great men in the smaller minuti;e
of dress, etc, we may fairly conclude
that the millennial dawn is at hand;
| that the white horse is already loom
| ing up in the eastern horizon, and the
banner Of white robed peace has been
unfurled to the world. And, truly, if
all the representatives of our country
were like our noble Aver we would
speedily get back to the simplicity
and honesty of the halcyOn days of
our republic, when franklin appeared
in democratic simplicity before the
effete monGrchs of Europe, and Jeffer-
son, the immortal, rode up on horse
back to the capitol, and hitching his
steed to the palings, went in and took
the oath of office, grasped the rudder,
and began to guide the ship of state
on its perilOus voyage through the
rocks that the federalists constantly
dropped in the way. Our distin-
guished representative, from his earli-
est infancy, was familiar with this
feat of Mr. Jefferson, and when the
people called him, as they did Cincin-
natus of old, from amidst the rural
pleasures of his farm to go up to the
capitol and rout out the hungry hordes
of ghouls that had so long been vast
| ing their substance, he thought that
he would at least parallel Tommie
Jetierson's feat. But his is an active,
ambitious mind. TO him, to wish is
have; TO decide, is to do. He is no
mere apist; when his great mind is
once turned into a certain channel it
rushes along like mighty untamed
Niagara that bears away all obstacles
and overlooks all bounds; and so,
when the day comes for him to set
forth he puts aside the equine steed
and determines to see Mr.. Jefferson
and go him one better. On his Marion
county farm, near Mcintosh, nature
had spread out a large, marsh or
prairie, on which, as the recurrent
seasons rolled around, rich grasses
sprung up in most succulent and lux
uriant growth. Attentive to natures
teachings, he had promptly accepted
her Invitation, and while yet "the
orange dispelled its perfume" had in
vested in Holstein cattle of pure and
generous strain and placed them
amidst the thanks and braes" of his
fertile farm to feast and fatten on the
succulent grasses that flourished there
in Klondike profusion. While wan
dering about the flowery mead and
watching the gay gambolngs of his
lusty calves, an inspiration came to
M Ill 81
these happy thoughts? Are the old
muses. of mythology still lowering
around to guide and direct puissant
genius, or are these great thoughts
heaven-born-a hand Divine directing
the motion of the gray matter that
moves unanimously within the |
cranlums of these, our noble states
men? Whatever the source, the in |
spiration comes like a flash of irridIs- |
cent light, and he determines that |
Tommie Jefferson shall be outdone. |
He will ride COW to the capitol and |
turn her loose to Craze beneath the |
trees that surround the ancient pile,
while he goes in to smite, hip and
thigh, the railroad lawyers and gov
eminent crib buns, who have been /
fattening on the taxes of his constitu-
ents.
There is quite an advantage in this
mode of travelling over Mr.. Jefferson's,
Tor while he doesn't exactly carry his
rations with him, as Phil Sheridan
said the crows would have to do while
flying over the valleys of Virginia, he
still carries a goodly supply of that
tactical fluid that formed his principal
stay and s0lace during the time his
budding genius was yet pleased with
a rattle, tickled with straw" And
what a feeling of independence it
gives a fellow to know that "men NAV
come and men may go" but his milk
flows on forever. No railroad ring.
no combination of sheriffs or other
lobbyists can starve him out, for
he is MIXED and buttered to stand a
summers siege. 1t is an easy matter
10 bring a starving man to terms, for
munger knows no law, and its pangs
were potent to bend the stubborn Jew
and bring jerusalem to terms:
But virtue well supplied.
May safely long be tried,
Ere railroad rings
And money kings.
With passes fair
And boobies cheer
Can catch and hold our noble Aver
Now, MIR. Editor, / want to know
what is the difference between Aver.
Marion county's big trucker, growing
large crops for the railroads and paying
them thousands of dollars in freight
every year, and Aver, Marion county's
representative. growing nothing for
the railroads and paying them only
the paitry sum of SIS for thousand
mile ticket? There is 4 diifsaenee and