The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1897-02-09
WAYSIDE GATHERINGS.
Bits OF Humor and Nuggets of Truth
for the Multitude.

The only way to have a friend is
to be one.
Nobody but fool will try to be
always witty.
No man can truly say that he has
always done his level best.
The able bodied man who will not
work deserves to starve.
| The time to show a courageous
| spirit is when the trial comes.
Diversity OF opinion proves that
things are only what we think them
-Switzerlan1 is the only civilized
country in the world which grants no
patents for inventions.
Tho ancients knew how to cheat.
Loaded dice have been found in the
ruins Of Herculaneum.
1t Is said that the emperor of
Russia received over 500 threatening
letters prior to his journey to France.
Strange to say, the bicycle now
iorms no inconsiderablc portion Of the
miscellaneous supplies forwarded to
the missionaries abroad.
George Vanderbilt is the largest
land owner In North Carolina. The
next largest is General Matt w. Ran
There are some people who mover
nave cheering word for the struggler.
They make life just as hard as possi-
bic for all who are striving to do right.
The more machinery, tho more
the farmer must hustle to drive it and
pay the bills. Tools are no excuse for
loaiing, but idle machines heap uu
debt.
Teach self-denial and make it's
practice pleasurable, and you create
ior the world destiny more sublime
than ever issued from the brain of the
widest dreamer.
"A Texas man claims to have in
vented perpetual motion machine
that can be utilized in saving wood,
In practical use, it would be splendid
object lesson for many men.
Sailors do not like cats. Thew
have saying when the cat is frisky
she has gale Of wind in her tale, and
u charm is often resorted to in a calm
by throwing the cat overheard to raise
q storm.
A bushel Of corn yields about 40
pounds of glucose. There are only about
hall dozen glucose factories in opera
tlon in this country. The smallest of
them grinds 10000 bushels of corn a
NaJ' WIG idI 3 CSU OU,OUU.
1t is folly to think that discomfort
can ever be cured by a change in
environment. 1t Is disease of the
soul. and can be removed only by in
spring that soul with the highest
principles of love and service.
So great Is my veneration for the
Bible, that the earlier nv children
begin to read it, tho more confident
will be my hopes that they will prove
useful citizens to their country, and
respectable members of society.-John
q. Adams.
1t is now said that X-rays exist in
nature and are produced by the com
mon glow-wOrm. The light from
these tiny creatures has the same ca
pac1ty as the ROentgen rays for passing
ordinary solids. 1t will even
penetrate thin sheets of aluminium.
Though an Inheritance of acres
may be-bcqueathed, an inheritance of
knowledge cannot. The wealthy man
may pay Others for doing his work for
him; but it is impossible to get his
done for him by another, or
to purchase any kind of sclf-culture.
=" Daddy" asked little Ephraim,
" whar did the fust turkey come from?"
" Nebber ,yo' mine askin' irrcligious
iuSSViouS, Sdlu UuC OlQ man. An
wen Pahson Thompson come for din
ner Sunday doan' yo fink yo hab ter
ask whar dat turkey come fun, elder"
"A famous Prussian general was
inspecting some military stables.
" What do see there" he said in tones
OF thunder to sergeant =" cobwebs ?"
% Yes, sir" was the respectful reply,
we keep them here to catch the fies
and prevent them from teasing the
horses"
"A father, in consoling his daugh-
ter, who had lost her husband, said
" don't wonder you grieve for him,
my child. You will never find his
equal" [ don't know as can" re-
piled the sobbing widow, "but IN do
my best :" Tho father went home
eomforted.
"A youth Of Hibernian extraction
in chopping wood with hatchet the
other day was so unfortunate as to
Craze the thumb Of his left hand with
which he was steadying the piece of
kindling he was splitting. Ruefully
gazing at the injured member, he re-
marked Begorah, it was a good
thing | aid not have hold of the han-
die with both hands or I'd have cut it
OFF, sure"