The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1897-08-19
SINNERS AED REILLY
Argue About X .on4 Lg and c Pro'Psst
lng for Beer.

II
SAY, Reilly, guess I'm crazy as
bugbed," said the sInker man. wheT
sarsaparllla Reilly entered the little
restaurant, as reported by the New
York sun
Dots der first time my vile salt
something right" he continued, "unl
! now ] belief myself 1t stands In del
paper night before yesterday dot whole
lot oof mems finds whole lot cot gold
In der streets oof--not Cairo-what dc
you call dot placer"
'Rlondyke?" suggested Reilly.
''Yeh! Krankheit!" said Slnkers
Dots der place, KraHkheit-Yhat q
foolish name! Really, Reilly, dots Ger
man for sickness. Krankhelt! Aeh, my
Reilly, when think on dat name you
may believe me not get sick una sick
er, Dot must be called after a hosplt-
able; What? You know Reilly I'm moi
superstltlous, but mebbe dots a bad
place for a man 60 vent 1 believe II.
Now | don't go at all
"Dld yer think ay goln'?' asked Reil-
ly,
"sure," answered slnkers; 81 we're In
tentioued to pack my trunk next week,
NOW | amt crazy no more, cause
chust changed my mind, seeY My wife
she said 10 me dot | we're crazy cause
didn't had enough money In der bank
to bring my family 10 KTankheit. She
said, What We lose by stayin' In New
York, und dot We might as veil been llv-
In in a gold house, nit gold shutters
mn dere. While our chil'rens pick der gold
flowers from der blackberry bushes In
der back yard ind dig der gold outer
der mudgutter for only play. Den she
say we're crazy for not savin' some
money for to go on KFaRkheit, but I'm
glad now when recommended such u
hard luck name. Really Reilly I'm hap
ny again, und mebbe Lena's crazy You
know What she did when We come in der
ferry house from Brooklyn?"
"No," said Reilly. What did she do?'
"she throwed away money regular
lOc dime piece. She put It In der nickel
slot machine to Weigh her und
me for &c each, ind We don't
got Weighted at tall cause der
machine only Weighs one for nick
ell upd not two for dime. Den When l
said she we're foolish she told me don't
mind her own business why don't save
my own money, und would had enough
to so to Rrankhelt."
TITS Klondyke," corrected Reilly, mot
Krankhelt."
"Yeu, what Is Il It's, anyhow" asked
the slnker man; "aln't II good city
What somebody didn't find before last
week?"
NO." said Reilly. "lt's a-a-wen, it's
n place that's noice an green In III
distance, but whin yer git up to It yen
foind RS not green at tall, an thin yer
April fooled, dyer molnd2"
Don't dere Vos any gold In der street
gutters?" asked Slnkers.
There's no streets there" answered
Reilly; "the min who KEN back say
they had ter swim through icebergs as
big as tn Brooklyn bridge an thin
wade across the sea av-what dyercall-
az"
Sea of shipraiterw interrupted Sink
ers.
Not at all" said Reilly, "Gibral-
ter's In Italy, where the Eyetalions
come from. / mean III sea av-Alaska
now 1 have it-Alaska. Well. they ate
iclcles all the way over, an tn gold
they found there they had ter leave on
the Ice bekase II was too heavy for them
ter carry widout gloves"
rs II yet so cold?" asked SlnkerS.
Worse" said Reilly. "a friend ev
mine was tellln' me II was so cold up
there last winter that he had ter put his
stove In his ice box ter keep tn fire
from freeZln'. bekase the lnsolde av his
ice box was only seventy degrees below
zero, while Il was slYen hundred an
sixty degrees below zero outside in his
Kitchen"
rs It yet so cold In tn summer"
asked the siuker man.
no" said Reilly, "its very warm;so
warm thye have big Ice fires there made
be tn SUMS rays, an millions av Ice
bergs are burnt livery summer jist as
they have forest fires out on tn pralrles
In the west"
Zach. my, how varm!" remarked Sim
kers, ''Vhen 1 see a cake oof Ice blaze
out iere can tlnk how warm 1 would
be-"
But to return to the gold question"
said Reilly. "If wlnt out ter that
country I'd have tn name changed
Immediately. I'd call II Clonderry, be-
kase Klondyke sounds too Dutchafed. "
Now you're commencing again,"
said the slnker man; I've don't want any
Irish gold cities. Ven It's tin city, den
it's Irish, but when IFS gold It's Ger
man-how you like dot?'
shut upl" shouted Reilly; you're a
dummy an so in your wolfe. Who
dropped III lOc piece In the nickel IN
the slot machine TO get two weighs at
once?"
"Reilly--say-Re US not fight,
hey?" remarked Slnkers. what We care
for Klondyke-not by darn sight: do
We Reilly, hey?"
Nav" said Reilly NOR Tor gold
mines; let's go next door an prospect
for beer"
And they went.
NJ, ,,,od 10 srrnInh ynut. IIfa nwoy