davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25
Two Minutes With Ed Howe,
From Atchison Globe.)


II a man wants to do all the talking
It is a sign that he thinks he is smarter
| than you are.
| Nearly every man a reporter meets has
Joke" on somebody he wants printed.
Excessive hot weather IS not necessary
to mature corn; it is simply mischievous.
If a merchant intends TO charge all alike.
| why does he use cipher for a selling
mark?
| woman who said to her children, Shame
on your
A rule has lately been adopted that an
unmarried woman is not an old maid until
after she passes thirty.
| We never care TO hear a banjo except
when we are drunk, and as We never get
drunk, We never care to hear banjo.
The women should be awfully good
| TO the men. What with war and appen-
| d:otis, they are becoming awfully scarce.
Every time we read a dry goods adver-
| tisement, it doesn't seem TO cost much
| to clothe woman. but we change cur
mind when the bill comes in.
| Probably at no time in a girls life does
1 tltS luluIc louh IilOEe HORS4SSo Niidl
she turns her face toward home, after
haunting the streets in vain TO see Him.
AS soon as a married couple who have
| been boarding announce that they intend
20 go 10 Housekeeping. doctors begin 10
SO out OF their way 10 speak pleasantly
10 them.
An Atchison girl. who has been kept in
the background. IS now OUT in society.
No party has been given to make her de-
but. but she IS 10 longer allowed TO run
out 70 the mi.kman with her hair uncomb-
ed. and in the evening joins her sisters on
the front porch in a new gown and an
attitude Of expectancy.
The country vlu have on ali It's new
spr.nx clothes by next Sunday. and when
nature goes IN for adorument, pretty
girl isn't IN Il. Wild blossoms viii make
TIE woods fragrant. ard violets. kitten
breaches and c-ocuses VII abound in pro-
fusion. The summer birds are al here 10
formally open the season with big con-
cert Admission free.
TIE writer Of this recently rode fifteen
miles IN company with a man who has
q reputation for good sense, ability 70 hold
his tongue. ard discretion L would have
been as interesting 20 have ridden w!ia
& corpse IL e hearse az = funeral TIE
wise nan never said word = ire journey
% fftesa miles. except 70 say Yes" or
No" There = no denying that laxative
tool Is occasionally good company
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25
FIRE LOSSES DECREASING.

| Last month the loss OF properly ID,
fire in the United States and Canada
was nearly $4,000 900 less than il wa
In March, 1896. or in the correspondent:
part of 1895. For the first quarter Of tn,
year the decrease in this waste wa.
! about $4,400.0O0 as compared with 1885,
and S7,2OO,0OO with 1895.
This would be very cheerful fact /,
| 1t meant nothing more than the grea
| saving which shows on the surface L
! has far wider and deeper significance
however. The change has been going
on SO long and under such conditions
that it seems to be pretty good evidence
that modern fireproof construction oil
great buildings is having its natura.
and proper effect and that the tendency
toward the concentration Of business
and industry in large establishments is
also movement in the direction Of bet
ter safeguards against fire and the bet
ter protection of property.
This is only one Of many signs tina,
business is being more and more care
fully organized and managed and that
The waste of American hurry and care
leSsneSs of little details is being gradu-
ally lessened. No doubt there will be
continued and more rapid Improvement
hereafter
The unspeakable Turk is also unpro-
nouncable.
Prince Constantine is having a hot old
time-sort OF Turkish.
''ItI had It 10 90 over again" remarked
4 politician yesterday, I would be born
in Ohio"
Just now me Louisville club is standing
on tip-toe and preparing to take its annual
scoot 10 the bottom of the row.
About the only way Grover Cleveland
could get a newspaper mention now would
be TO claim that he had seen the airship.
While the Egyptian poodles are yelpirg
at the pyramids the Greek dogs have begun
10 bay the nooR-the new moon, Of course.
Ola General Naseline = breaking out IN
Crete again and the Sultan has called ou,
TWO corps Of the DandriTs al Constantine
pie.
Il must be conceded frankly that Leaven-
worth does not appear 10 have gained any
advantage by having two United States
senators. so far.
Said Edin Pasha IS now in the field Il;
Will De remembered that the said Sad
said Sai5 E6hem Pasha wouldn't Be able
10 cut the caper
Osman Pasha who has been faster 10
the Sultan viii. in a few weeks. by run
mig the spoon around in the soup. hni
the Sultan himself.
Tim Mccarthy. the new mayor o: Lar
ned. Is a dead likeness for King Humhe=t-
We desire 10 inform ssSsss.ns. however,
that Mr.. Mccarthy wears galvanized iron
vest.
London dii not hear Of The battle Q.
Waterloo unt.i four days after II was
fought. The Eagle every day publishes dis
patches from Greece ats o'clock n the
morning relating things that took place
- 9 o'cjo~x tha SarYse r,orrinr
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25
W9vGasgA1s&g
In the Carpet Department

IN the Carpet Department
There is going to be considerable excitement in
the Carpet Department Wednesday. Look in the
big window.
l. 200 fine Scotch Wilton Rugs, 77x6o inches, will
be put on sale at S1.00 EACH
It's just like finding them.
On Thursday
we will offer Is dozen of Mems Night Robes
gooo length. good material, good make, all for e
cents on next Thursday. See north window.
Grear Remnant Carnival
Friday.
The greatest collection of Remnants ever put
before Wichita buyers. The short lengths from the
spring seasons choicest things will be sacrificed
here next Friday. Silks for waists and trimmings
dress goods for waists skirts and cidrens dresses
wash goods remnants in great numbers, donestcs
and odds and ends through this entire store.
Look for our Millinery Specials.
Flowers and Fine Sailors i'm a few
days. They will be full of interest.
Shirt Waists, Dress Skirts and Suits at special
prices
1913 and I27 Main St.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

Pa who Was shyioek.' ''Gre1; goot-
RES, boy You attend church e,1 Sunday
scAooi every week and don't know wno
ShylOck VAS cried his fsihs-. GO ans
rad your Ethis. ss-r-T,,-B...
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

Little Eva crsp-~Whsn deg szy Il 6ss
Eyzh stn-y GAs ds gal WIZ FAR. to1s ley
zseza s1e Scz g0ot-iook.u- ,.-ss Craps
We'll / eg-7c. r<be< deg Eez1 eAe
WIZ q nuis,ss-'-Puck
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

London dii not hear Of the battle o.
Waterloo until four days after il was
fought. The Eagle every day publishes dis
patches from Greece ats o'clock IN the
morning relating things that took pace
81 o'clock the same morning
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

A.stress-"Why. Mary you have dat
ej yo1r s7tIer a week ahead" Maid
Il Is n: L VIII take over a weak fo- !; 20
sc: 70 ne mother. and she wouldn't care
% De reading oI5 rexs"-Bosto1 Trans
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

The unspeakable Turk is also unpro-
nouncable.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

'It / had 1t 10 90 over again" remarked
4 politician yesterday. Il would be born
In Ohio"
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

Just now me Louisville club is standing
on tip-toe and preparing TO take its annual
scoot 10 the bottom OF the row.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

Prince Constantine is having a hot old
time-sort OF a Turkish
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

TIN Mccarthy. the new mayor % Lar
red, Is a dead likeness for Kiag Humhe=t
We desire 10 inform sssass.ns. however.
that Mr.. Mccarthy wears galvanized Iron
vest.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

About the only way Grover Cleveland
could get newspaper mention now would
be 10 claim that he had seen the airship.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

Osman Pashs who hss been faster 70
he Sultan viii. in a few weeks. by run
r.ng the spoon around in the soup. hni
the Sultan himself.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

While the Egyptian poodles are yelpirg
at the pyramids the Greek dogs have begun
TO bay the nooR-the new moon, Of course.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

Said Edin Pasha is now in the field I;
viii be remembered that the said Sad
said Sai5 Edhem Pasha wouldn't Be able
70 ,,;Tr the csper
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

OLD General Vsseline = breaking out IN
Crete again and The Sultan has called out
TWO corps of the DandriIs al Constantine
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-04-25

Il must be conceded frankly that Lesven-
worth does not appear TO have gained any
advantage by having two United States
sar,aro 81 far
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31
A TRACT FOR HER PAINS.
DIRE RESULT or SPEAKING TO AN OLD
LADY IN THE ELEVATED TRAIN.

Julia" asked the tall girl who had just de-
scended the elevated stairs. OF the friend
whom she met at the corner. do ] look like any
particular kind Of reprobate? Because I've just
been taken for one. and the moral Of it all is to
me- Don't volunteer any Information to stan
gers in the cars
Then. taking pity upon the utterly mysthed
expression Of Julia's face. the alleged reprobate
proceeded to explain the situation
"You see" she said at Twenty third st. a
nicc-looking old lady got into the train and hap
pcned to sit down by ne. l noticed that she
watched every station sign as If she were AFRAID
she would not get out at the right place. ana
finally when we were at about Fifty-ninth-st..
think. she asked the guard 10 tell her the near
est station TO Seventy -fourth-st. He didn't seem
TO pay mach attention to hcr-perhaps he didh l
hear hcr-so | thought | would be polite and
offer my services.
"T am going beyond that madam. said.
and | shall be glad to see that you get off at
Seventy second ST.. which is the nearest for
you
We'll she thanked me. and then she began To
look me over from head to foot Just as | was
getting rather nervous at this. and wondering
what could possibly be wrong with my clothes,
she pulled out little pamphlet from her satchel
and offered it to me. Julia. what do you suppose
it was. a tract. as sure as I'm alive ! stared
at it and then at her Then "A confused idea mat
she might be selling these for the beneht oi
some charity occurred to me. and ! began L"
open my purse.
"'No. no. she said. in 4 rather agGrevcd
tone salvation is free
"'Oh-or-yes. Of coirsr. murmur"d. trying
10 apologize. but she went right on:
81 always carry a supply Of these little Lear
lots with me. and make practice II distributing
them here she looked Al me harder than ~ r -
where think They VII Do the most good"
This is Seycnty-sccond-gi.. where YOU want
,o get out was an | needed 70 say just then
and you may be- sure said it. But you see 1t Al
came Of my speaking To- her in the first place
We'll. We live 10 learn. GooIby.' and she hur-
ricd off across town.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31
GIRAFFE HUNTING.
From Harper's Weekly.

rIoil I1dTIcI , w
The pleasure of a giraffe hunt is indisputable.
but ii is one that no real sportsman will repeat
more than twice a hard spur and a SJambOk
gallop through bush and thorn with more than
an even chance of your nag putting his foot
in jackals earth. gradual overhauling Of
the giant mammals that are sailing without
apparent cXertlOn in front Of you. hasty
dsmount unless you are lucky enough To be
able to shoot from horseback. bullet planted
just above the tail and penetrating through the
tough skin into tne heart and lungs. and with
n crash your game comes to earth. and YOU
standing. dripping with rerspration after your
tWO-me run, and outra geOusly scratched with
haakdoorn. over the body Of what is surely the
strangest animal that even South Africa can
produce.
The trouble is that beyond the chance Of be-
ing thrown or of coming in contact with a tree
there Is not much danger in the pursuit Of
the giraffe No animal could be more gentle
or defenceess. You have the thrilling excite
ment of a twenty minutes burst, but YOU miss
what should be the spice Of the big game hunt
ing-the risk. All that need in giraffe
hunting is a good nag if possible one that has
been us,si to the business. 1t is hard 10 keep
an inexperienced horse from boring To one side
when the disagreeable smell of an old giraffe
bull comes down the wind. With that ana
press ones are not firm enough 10 yet far
beyond the inch or inch and half Of brazen
hide that incases these mOnsters-succcss is al
most certain.
CRATES do not put out their fullest speed
unless very hard pressed. They start of at
an easy. ambling gait moving the legs on
one side simultaneously. Ike an American
PAGER Their black bushy tails corkscrew over
their backs and their immense nccks bob back
ward and forward at each stride. They DO not
appear to be going very fast but you will find
YOU have to be we'll mounted to get within
shooting distance of them. If not run down
Of getting clean away. When going their
hardest they change their gait into extra
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31

only one respect-t Is possible to raise or de-
press the aim of one without moving its mate
From the outside the drill with them appears
SLOW process. for the guns cannot be moved
rapidly.
Among the other exercises Of the morning
were few minutes rife drill and the setting
up drill-a series OF calisthenic movements de-
signed to improve the mems bearing and keep
them agile. Training of this kind is especially
needed on the modern warships, which, in their
baroness of everything like spars and rigging
afford none Of the opportunities for exercise
which were plenty on the ld-fashioned vessels.
The setting-up drill is usually the first on the
days programme. being held Immediately after
the general inspection at quarters. The men
are exercised in divisions the forward deck
and the quarter deck Each division is always
drilled by the same officer, who is thus able to
notice how his men improve and what move
ments they chiefly need There are. in ALL
eighteen different exercises prescribed in the
regulations. They consist of the best recognized
movements for developing all the muscles of
body and limbs and for strengthening the
breathing apparatus. The setting-up drill
usually concludes with brisk double quick
for a few minutes. The space for this being
limited. the men become expert in making short
turns in close order The officers of some of
ashore for the double quick" but it is the Gus
tom on the Puritan to drill at all times just
as if the vessel were at sea
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31
A NOVEL TYPE OF GUNBOAT.
THE HELENA AND HER MILITARY MAST
GUNS AND SHARPSHOOTERS IN
THE FIGHTING TOPS.

Novelties IN naval construction 10 meet new
features expected in actual warfare are not
elsewhere more apparent than in the latest gun
boats. of which the Helena. recently a visitor
to the Washington ordnance establishment, il
a type. This vessel attracted widespread Gu
riosity there among Uncle Sans professional
warriors stationed at headquarters. particularly
on account Of her lofty smokestack and mill
tary mast. which are wholly dsproportionats
to her size whcn compared with familiar marine
craft
This mast. with its platforms or tops" is
designed for novel uses. In the river service
for which the Helena class has been especially
adapted. it is to furnish shelter as elevated
as possible for a wide outlook over the sur
rounding country especially where the banks
are high or wooded. and To provide unexposed
pcrchcs for sharpshooters. 1t is practically two
masts as high As the lower fighting top. the
inner tube or mast proper Of two feet diameter
extending To the platform above the search
light. sixty feet above water where four
mca manipulate the automatic guns. firing twice
each second. Around this mast an outer shell
SIX feet in diameter covers u staircase to the
pilot-housc and to the lower top. where eight
men are in action stationed at the four one
FOUNDER rapid-hrc Hotchlkiss guns each firing
"a
fighting tops run electrical ammunition hoists
rca hing down into the magazines below water.
and speaking tubes. signals. steam steering
gear and other apparatus are inclosed.
Above all. towering over one hundred feet. rises
the signal mast. The huge stack discharges its
smoke eighty feet above the iire-grate beneath
the boilers. this height serving the double pur
pose Of carrying away the smoke from the
sharpshooiers and furnishing great natural
draught IN the nre-rOoms without the aid Of
blowers
The Helena has eight four-inch rapid-frc
rifles. six In broaGs.de and two on the main
deck Each has crew II four men attended
by four ammunition passers. The gun captain.
standing AT the left. trains. cleyatcs and fires;
the second captain. at the right relieves him
when disabled. No . with a sweeping
motion swings open and shut the breech. AMI
~. loads the J1-pound cartridge nt'
the gun. The Hecna'5 forward deck crew VIII
hi; a snail target mile away five times in
forty-lVr seconds with steel shot weights;
thirty thrcc pounds The shield protecting the
four men is of thrcc-inch steel and the guns
pedestal. besides containing all needed mplc-
mcnts rcsists twcnty-ton rccoil at each dis
charge,
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31
DiREDEIH HLROISV.
BRAVE RESCUE oF GENERAL PAYNE nY soMs
NEGRO VoLr STEERs.

BRAVE RESCUE oF GENERAL PAYNE BY SOMB
NEGRO VOLUNTEERS.
From III, Buffalo Express.
The most daredevil piece % herosm ! ever
saw was by some negroes before Fort Pillow.
when 1 was "a prisoner Insd" the fort and Gen
cral Payn. WAS lying IN front Of II with his leg
shot of % was the way Charles Cotton. Of Com
pany & 81 the lGlst Ncw-York Infantry. began
"A story Of valiant rescue that H. told to some
negro veterans.
General Paync's les: had been shot of in the
first charge" ne continued. and he was lying
hidden behind some rocks in front Of the fort,
him The scathing fire from the fort swept
that spot and no officer dared To command any
II his men To 20 t. certain death in what
looked Xix. a vain attempt To rescue their cher.
while the men were celebrating negro
stepped up and said. We might as well run
our chances now as any other time. ana L. Tor
one Will make the attempt He was handsome
fellow. and the spirit he displayed was At once
cqualled by that Of eleven other negroes VINO
stepped out and volunteered their SERVICES
str,tchcr was brought. and tour OF them started.
but had gone only a few yards wren every one
was shot dead. moment after Tour othcrS Oh
the volunteers rushed out. and. picking up IN"
str.tcher carried II a few yards furthrr. Wnch
they too were killed The -four who were LETT
went ahead as If nothing had happened. ana
two of them cane back alive with the General
while TIA" other two we're left dead it the pir
of rocks where General Payne had been lying
General Payne is still living. and. am toii. IN.
two noble fellows sho rescued him nave Wahte"
for nothing ever since.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31

From The Cincinnati COnmcrca-Tribune
The big politician SAT surrounded by bottles
and pill boxes Of all sizes and descriptions. w ~
ne sick? Missy,
Nov. let me SOC" h. unused II hay" sent
testimonials to eighteen of those twenty patent
,n.Iiciu. makers and inside week they VIII all
nv. . thrcc-colunu picture of mo in a thou
sand papers at once. along with my letter IN
dDrsing their stun.
He smiled softly To himself as ne "mptied Two
of the bottles into the fireplace.
This beats ordinary campaigning al hollow
rIl write for some more sampl" bottles Tonight.
It's the only way To- keep before all the people DIT
once"
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31
81 RPRISED As BiLliU WAS.

From Cass"lrs Journal
The following is the story told Of doctor NJ
one Of the London hospitals. lie was one day
Iecturing To y class of medical students. when
ne stopped and asked Il question winch Tor some
time none OF them answered. 'ut one man. VINO
had never answered question before. and was
looked upon as the fool of the class. answered
corrcctly The doctor was astoniShcd. ana
stared at the man in amazcment.
You look surprised sir" said the student
so did Baaam! was the doctors sharp reply.
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31
PRESEN'T or VIVID.

From The Cleveland Leader.
She DO You ever :eaa poetry
IL Nsishing % imlress herr on. yes. am
quite fond i poetry.
Shc-Tm 50 Glad, ~. got a poem here that
wrote when / was AT school Ia lik" 10 have
your opinion ~ %.
Ur-Hist, hist, / smell smoke, | believe the
house j. aiire.
during the excitement a. escapcsJ
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31
I o. TSTION.

From The Indianapolis Journal.
First Siatcsmau-I hear that there are some
fellows going around Offering hrihcs
Second Stiicsms n-Thai IS something that
ought To- be- taken hand a soon possible.
"Which-the fell Us or The mOncyH'
New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-10-31

ordinary sort of gallop. their hind legs being
well straddled oct and brought forward one
on each side in front of the forecgs 1t is
jerky. convulsive. awkward movement. but
wonderfully effective a means of getting over
the ground.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1897-12-04
THREE OLD MEN WIN.
CONTINUED FROM FIRST pAGE)

constituents: because he had not been
able TO prevail upon Mr.. Helms to en-
ploy all the men In Richmond who
wanted Jobs at the penitentiary; because
he had not succeeded I'm getting Speaker
Ryan TO appoint about a hundred Rich
mond BOYS as pages In the House. He
desired 10 endorse Captain O'Bannon. be-
cause ne thought the latter was the most
frightened man he ever saw to have so
many votes behind him. Mr.. O'Bannon
had made a splendid officer. he said, and
Il gave him great pleasure to second his
nomination. Mr.. Folkes's speech was the
hit of the evening.
Mr.. Pitcher, at its conclusion, said that
the gentleman from Richmond had ac-
quilted himself so handsomely that ne
had decided 10 vote for Captain O'Ban-
non, though he had at first intended 10
cast his ballot for Mr.. Marsh. He also
said that at some other time he would
grant him Folkes) permission TO again
address the House.
Mr.. Minter. one Of the Oldest members
OF the body, took occasion to congratu-
late Mr.. Folkes on his effort, to which
he referred as an eloquent, sensible,
and telling speech" He declared that he
hoped when the young man reached ma
turer years and further development, ne
would discover that sometimes the
'tother man can get cold also"
The roll was called to ascertain the
vote, and when something over half COM
pleted, IL was evident that Captain O'Ban-
non was the choice beyond a doubt, Mr..
Lowry asked that the nomination of the
incumbent be made unanimous, which
was done.
The caucus then adjourned.