The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1897-02-10
THE COLONEL
AND THE MAJOR
BY JOHN KEARNS WHITE.

The colonel was born on the 10th day
of December, and the major followed
promptly the next day. At least this
was the tradition i'll the old Virginia
town which was the place of their ne
tivity. To be sure, heard one man
say that he looked into the family Bible
and had found the record of the majors
birth in March, but he was a croaker
and a skeptic generally, and his cyni-
cal utterances can have no weight
against well-established tradition.
This much is sure, however that the
day after the colonel was first sent 20
school the majors name was also en-
rolled on the list of pupils. You see
the way Of it was this: The two fami-
lies lived next door to each other, and
naturally the boys became playmates,
and continued so until the colonePs
eighth birthday. Then the coionels
mother decided that he was old enough
to go to school. Not so however, with
with the majors. She thought that
the major was 'entirely too young to
be sent out into the world yet''-the
''worldn meaning Miss Fannie Adams
school down at the corner. So the coll
onel went to school and the major
stayed at home-for one day. He could
bear it no longer than that; the side
ward was desert without the colonel.
He pleaded and wept until finally, with
fearful eyes, the fond mother decided
TO send her son out into the world, and
two young hearts were made supreme
ly happy.
On account of his advantages in age,
and his longer experience in school life,
the colonel undertook the office of
patron to the major, which service the
latter accepted very gracefully, until,
having acquired some experience him.
self, he began to relson that the colonel
was scarcely far enough ahead Of him
to warrant his attitude. So he rebeil-
ed against the colonePs authority and
proclaimed his independence.
This lasted three days, and then the
| colonel regained his ascendency in a
manner altogether unusual among the
powers of the world.
While so little older than the major,
he was good deal larger and stronger,
though il must be added in justice to
the latter, not a whit more courageous.
He did not us9 his superior strength to
coerce his former follower into renew,
ed allegiance; but the day that Ton,
Sykes, the bully of the school, attempt-
ed to take 10y force the majors top,
| knocked him down, and was proceed
| ing to administer a severe thrashing,
Iss,E,,a.denly the colonel appeared on the
scene ana aA-ssomptly placing himself
in front of the bIs,,W, engaged him in
battle. What a battlseit was! 1t took
rank among the classics OF fssnre ssr.. ciio0i'
and to this day the two or thres
viving witnesses will tell you, ''n
bated breath, how, after long str
gle, the colonel succeeded in whippif $
Tom Sykes, who Was so much oideA
and bigger, and who had never been
whipped before.
And from that day forward the ma
jor never questioned the propriety Of
yielding his allegiance TO the colonel.
And the colonel in turn appreciated
this devotion, so that when he raised
company to enter the Mexican war,
and they elected him captain, and
Fred Collins first lieutenant, he refused
to accept the honor unless they made
the major first lieutenant, and SO they
got together again and nullified the
election of Fred Collins and elected
the major in his stead. And this ad-
ded to the strength of the army, for
Fred Collins left that company and
raised one of his own, and was elected
captain and went to the war, ard,
poor fellow, he was killed.
And then when the great Civil war
broke out and their regiment held q
meeting to elect officers, the foremost
local orator arose after Major Jett had
been elected full colonel, and said:
Gentlemen of the -th Virginia, it
gives me great pleasure to put in NOM
ination for the lieutenant-colonelcy Of
this regiment the name of that modest
gentleman, that brave soldier, another |
veteran Of the Mexican war, Lieuten-
an. -" and he called the maine of the |
major. And now the boys did cheer!
and the colonel led the cheering, and, |
in fact, it was whispered that the ma
lor's nomination was due altogether |
TO the colonel's contriyance anyhow. |
Well, the major was just overwhelmed !
with pleasure aud surprise, for be |
thought the name to he pronounced l
would surely be the colonePs; in fact
he was a good deal astonished that /
Major Jett was elected commander in !
stead of his friend. As it was, he rose
to his feet, blushing ard stammering,
and after thanking the gentlemen for .
honor conferred, he said that there
were many in that gathering who were