The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1897-05-16
Conyright. 1897.

II shines at intervals-and one day it is
so abominally hot that every woman longs
20 be dressed, as was the maiden fair
reouested to by her lover with rose in
her hair" and the next day one is regret
ting that the furs have been packed.
American weather and the American tar
iff are alike in being movable feasts. The
only thing to do, unless there is strong
warming for the grip and the better land
that's pretty sure to follow it, is to stay in
the house in a comfy frock, read an inter-
esting book while one wonders vaguely
what kind of clothes one will get for the
summer time. Then one thinks of the wo-
men who have gotten summer clothes
Usually the woman who has belongs to the
tyne that is aggressively beforehand. She
prides herself on being up to date in every
thing. She observes holidays religiousiy
and nine times out of ten she wears stiff
straw hat with a black band around it,
which she has selected, not because it's
Incoming, but because it will wear we'll
She's certain, too, to drag her hair back
from her forehead, not allowing it to be
fluffy or loose. but pulling it so tight that
her eyebrows so up in queer sort of way
and she looks as if she couldn't wink her
ewes. She says that waving the hair will
eventually burn it off. But it certainly is
herter to submit to feminine weakness
of burning eventually, and give to ones
face a womanly sort of expression. She S
the sort of woman who wouldn't put any
powder on her nose if it shone like look
ing-glass She's one among the many
who are blots upon this otherwise civilized
nation. Her kind are the women who are
sadly. mournfully, aggressively, over
whelmingly, assertively and disgustingly
clean They have a scrubbed air that is
neither feminine nor fascinating. Her
cleanliness is not virtuous; it is Pharl-
saical. 1t announces itself by her shiny
nose. which absolutely says, "Ho! no!
behold l am not like unto other women;
I've scrubbed my face with soap and
water, and the powder of the toilet table,
the understanding waters and the dainty
unguents are considered by me as the
vanities of vanitiesw She ought to be
boycotted. Why? Because she is bitterly
opposed to everything that's nice and an
ardent advocate of everything that Is
nasty She would prefer soda water to
something good that's extra dry. She
thinks the blue Sundays that we are nav
ing are most desirable institutions. She
induces, by continual nagging, the unfor-
tunate husband whom she controls, into
voting the prohibition ticket, while she
wonders that anybody should prefer ter
rapn to some wheat composition Whlch
looks like glue and tastes like paste Ten
to one she's a crank at intervals on the
subject of dress reform, and makes her
self an object-spelled with big o.
by carrying out her theories.
The feminine crank positively objects to
the corset She wears a boned bodice,
which points a moral and adorns a tale.
She is utterly shapeless, and her appear
ance is enough to drive the feminine Wo-
man to tight lacing, which would be
wrong. In summer time she looks not. IL
she is stout her appearance is improper,
because it's unbeautiful. And II she S
thin she looks like a planked shad. she
usually uncomfortable. though she
wouldn't confess it TO save her soul.
have said about a million times, more or
less, that a well-htting corset hurts no
one. All this talk about having skirts
suspended from the shoulders OF women
is really nonsense of the worst kind. The
Lord didn't build women that way. He
sustain any weight that was necessary.
This is the truth, and If truth is mighty
and really does prevail, then, in some nap
by future the desirability. of the well-ht-
ting corset will be recognized. All those
nasty, ill-fitting health bodices remind me
of the men who won't have glass Oh
wine in their own houses, but are very
happy to drink it when visiting. They
haven't independence enough to do the
right thing, and they compromise on the
namby pamby. It's rather funny that
there are no women in this world as
healthy as the English woman, ana no
women who lace so much. Inc tIeAch
women and the American women have,
naturally, broader hips and smaller waists
so that 10 attain the fashionable, which
is not the hour-glass shape, no lacing Is
required. But the English woman, with
her narrow hips and broad shoulders,
needs to make her waist smaller to achieve
the shape that she desires; and yet, WheIe
are there women who bring into the worla
finer sons, physically, than the English
women? That Is one of the very best an
swers when objections are made to the
corset. The best specimens, as far as
size and beauty go, of English men, are
not what a clever girl called tailor
made" but to coin an expression "motn-
er-made."
Where are they? It's very easy to say
put on comfy gown anu icdh al AAN~A
esting book. but first you must eaten your
book. Why doesn't somebody write
really interesting book? What has be-
come of the people with imaginationsT Is
there nobody to succeed Dumas and
Charles Reade. Wilkie Collins and Dick
ems, Gaborlau and Balzac-this mingling
may seem odd. yet II covers a class OF
books that interested everybody Doesn
anybody know how TO write a book that
will get one up TO such a pitch OF excite
ment that ones heart beats quicker walt
ing for the denouement, and the blood
courses through ones veins while SYM
pathy, hate and love are touched upon
llkethe strings OF harp IN rapid success
sion? These old stories. probable or not.
took one out Of ones self and kept alive
the natural feelings. Why doesn't some-
body write something where there Is con-
tnual change and where forty pages are
not given TO analyzing what the heroine
thought OF the hero's appreciation OF mu-
sic hve 70 her disappointment when she
round Il did not agree with hers, and five
moro 90 their last meeting. wherein we
are generally told exactly how he held his
nat. how she looked out from under hers.
ana how, bidding each other farewell.
they walked off, or out into the unknown
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