El Paso daily herald. (El Paso, Tex.) 1881-1901, 1897-01-09
A sLIDETROMBONE SOPHOMORE.
Or the Sad, Sad Fate of a Prominent
Member of the McGinty Club.

There is an embryonic artist over at
the McGinty club, an embryonic artist
on the slide from bone, who recently
passed successfully the shoals of his
from bone freshman year, and has been
hero1cally battling with the apparent
ly insuperabl obstacles Of his first
sophomore semester.
This struggling genius acknowledges
gracefully the title and cognomen OF
Colonel Dangerfield. He is earnest,
perspiringly earnest in his stole, II not
absolutely heroic determination to
| konker that from bone or perish in the
attempt. That is, his red fire burns
brightly until the neigh borhood has
become aroused, and a more or less
temporary season of sudden seclusion
in the cyclone cellar becomes matter
OF pressing concern.
The gallant colonel ignited his red
fire the other evening, and taking six
teen marches from the band library,
he sat down with stole mien, resolved
to ''do or die" He was doing the do"
all right enough-that is to his own
satisfaction, when the neig nbors sud-
denly concluded he would do well to do
the Idle" act also, and that too without
unnecessary delay. When the per-
former found things unexpectedly
coming his way, he pulled his freight
for the cyclone cellar, and emerged
when the storm had blown over, with
a cautious andantino movent. Then
hieiDg himself to the band room armo-
ry where the instruments are stored,
he lighted the gas, and proceeded very
tentavely to oHce more attack the
ramparts of the divine muse. The fret
effort was an original Interpretation
of Back to the Old Home-the city
jail" The treatment of this selection
was marked by an entire absence of
staccato, and the development of the
legato into prolonged glissando.
Each crescendo and diminuendo was
about twenty three bars long; and a
toboggan slide on the one hand, and
the slow climbing up the hill on the
other, weren't in it at all. 1t was
prolonged candy pull with 'goipg to
see man between the acts left out.
With this achievement, Colonel
Dangerfeld Stacked his thirst-not at
the bung hole of a barrel, dearly be-
loved reader, but with hearty, healthy
drafts of city water works lemonade
from the club room faucet. Then he
started in with Fair, Fair, with Gold
en- HAIRCUT still we do not like it in
our butter.'' In this choice bit of ro-
mantle sentiment, the legato-glissando
study was taken up again, but in an
advanced stage of the disease. Our ar
tist was now boning right down to usi-
ness IN the OeadcSt KIND or dead ear
nestness. and was stretching out IN
horrible extenso all the y-y-ee-ows,
m-m-ee-ows, k-k-ee-ows, h-h-ee-ows,
SIS ee-ows, s-s-c-ee-ows of the most dia-
bOlical kind of a glissando, such as
make a man feel that the nerves are
being slowly pulled from his teeth,
when a tumult outside the club room
door startled him. Ala, in an evil mo-
ment the artist bad left the armory door
open, and-and-and, the entire neigh Dor
hood was
Gentle, rosy checked reader, let us
draw the curtain DER this painful
scene; ring it down, in fact, with "a
terror stricken fugitive working the
disappearance racket up
the scuttle of the club house
atmosphere. Imagine if you will, a
crouching figure behind a chimney
fearful for life itself. while an enraged
populace with pitchforks and other
cheerful instruments of torture are
hoOraying up those scuttle stairs after |
the terrified prey. But don't please !
expect the writer to go into such !
utterly narrowing details, because he J
positively refuses to do so The chron-
cles of the McGinty club contain the
in all their horrid minutiae, |
md the dear, curious public is referred
20 Librarian Baber who keeps these
5ybaline books, or to President Reck-
lart.
Here endeth the thirteenth lesson.
The natural bridge of Arizona is one
If the wonders of the world, and far