davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
poo TO BE PROUD OF.
Could Swim Under Water and Turn
'Flip-TIapS" in the Air.

Could swim Under Water and Turn
"Flip-TIapS" in the Air.
II was way the trappers had to spin
yarn or two and get old 81 LimiclS
started, for he was easily the most
fluent and imaginative liar that ever
struck a trail, says the Detroit Free
Press. "Spealin' bout dogs" broke
in 81 with his slow look and honest
drawl, II owned the curi'stest canine
bout ten year back that ever wagged
a tail. He was a ugly little runt an
no good fer bars, but when 1t KUN
ter small game an fish he war p'isen."
What er yer given us bout a dog
fish, SIT"
Lots o. things in the worl you uns
never heerd on. That there dog ulster
run roun tn bottom O. river same's
'twar dry Ian. / seed him swim fer
half mile onct un'er tn ice an bring
out a fish bigern hisself. TIL critter
could do 'ithout breathin' frum fifteen
ter twenty minutes, cordin ter how
he war feelin'. rugged up regular
bellyban with a blowed up bladder
'tached by rope That thar doggone
up lister git inter tn mersheen, on his
own hook and go sailin."
But how would he sail back agin
tn win, Si?"
He'd jist haul in tn bladder, jam 1t
atween his forrard legs fer life per-
sarver an paddle in. He never turned
pup ulster git inter tn mersheen on his
tn win war.
But what beat me bout that dog
war his 'gility. You I'd orter seen
him workin rabbit in a brush heap.
He'd be yelpin one side, an the rab-
bit would start fer ter run Dutch 10th
err side. He'd make bout tn orfules'
jump you ever see. When he'd be half
way over, the rabbit'd whirl, and right
thar in tn air that thar dog'd turn
rare en- fip-fap an Ian whar he started
at time ter catch tn rabbit. Never
heard O. no other dog could do it."
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

DR.. Richard s. Storrs, the president
of the American Historical society,
chose for the subject of a recent ad-
dress, 1.-THE Contributions Made by
Plain, Uncelebrated Men to the Devel-
opment of the United States" The
names he mentioned were Eleazar
Wheelock, Manasseh Cutler and Mar
Gus Whitman. The first was poor
New England country minister, but his
efforts founded Dartmouth college,
where Daniel Webster, Rufus Choate,
Salmon P. Chase and George Ticknor
were educated. Manasseh Cutler was
also a country minister, but to him
was due the fact that slavery never set
foot upon the soil Of Ohio, Indiana, Illi-
nois, Michigan and Wisconsin. And
Marcus Whitman was an humble mis-
sionary who gave his life for the In
dams, and to them-for they killed
him; but because Of Marcus Whitman
Oregon belongs to the United States
and not to Great Britain. These were
all plain, uncelebrated men," but they
saw things worth doing, and did them
manfully.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
A coMpLETE FAvoRrrE.
How y Conversational Terror Was Van
quishsd by Superior Forces.


quished by Superior Forces.
well" exclaimed the man with the
fur-trimmed coat, according to the
Washington Star, II never expected to
see 1t, but I'm glad 1t happened" He
was so busy talking to himself as he
hurried through the depot that he ran
into a policeman, II beg your par
DON" he exclaimed, as he observed the
policeman's offended dignity. II really
didn't mean to do 1t. Things have
gone 80 strangely with me today that
| am liable to make most any kind of
blunder; / really am"
What's the matter with your" in
quired the policeman. "You aren't get
ting hysterical, are your
Certainly not. was holding lit
tie Jubilee-a sort of jollihcation meet
ing--all to myself. You see, myself
and the other people connected with
the dime museum which / manage
have been domineered over for a long
time by the bearded lady. She's pop
ulist, and | never saw anybody so opin-
donated. She won't even admit that
McKinley's elected. She talks silver
by the hour and when anybody tries
to argue with her she simply opens
the flood-gates of her eloquence and
washes EN- clear out of the debate.
She started in just as soon as we left
New York to make life burden to
everybody in the car, Talk? She can
articulate faster than Russell Sage
makes money. We all gave up trying
to outtalk her long ago. We knew
there was nobody that stood any
chance. So we just let her have her
own way. But she met her Waterloo
at last, and it's all l can do to keep
from singing for JOY"
How did she meet it?' inquired the
policeman, who had condescended to
become interested
"The two-headed girl Joined us here
this afternoon. They're mighty bright
i mean she's mighty bright girl.
The bearded lady started In to talk
politics and in few minutes she didn't
know what was happening to her. One
Of the two-headed girls heads threw
the protective tariff at her in sentences
a yard long, and the other head gave
her Observation-Disclosures about the
gold standard. 1t came like a cy-
clone and the bearded lady hasn't had
word to say for more than three
quarters of an hour"
"The two-headed girl is quite hero
inc, then, amt she?"
81 should say so. She was kind O.
bashful at first, because she has been
out of an engagement and wasn't
dressed very we'll. I'm going out now
to look for a millinery store. want
to buy her a couple of handsome new
bonnets just to show her how much
we think of her."
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

Since the seal family at the zoo has
increased to seven members the big
tanks in which they reside are sought
out by great numbers Of visitors, and
especially at o'clock each afternoon
the crowds gather around to see Keep
er Geiger perform with his pets At
that hour the keeper comes out with a
bucket Of fish in his hand, trots along
a plank over the surface of the water
to mound Of rocks in the center of
the tank and assumes heroic pose on
top of the eminence. Then with an in
troductory bow to the audience he
whistles to the seals and distributes the
fish, The seals cluster about him at
the base of the mound in picturesque
group and reach up their heads to re-
ceive the food, which he deftly losses
down their yawning mouths. If the
fish go in head first they are gulped
down with an avidity that would put
the patron of an Eighth street lunch
counter to shame, but if by chance they
strike the other way about the scales
are apt to catch in the rough upper sur
face of the seals mouth aud cause mo-
mentary choking. When the fish are
tossed into the water and have to be
dived for the seals never make mis-
take but invariably swallow them the
right Philadelphia Record.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
An EXCESS of Faith.

Presiding Elder examining appli-
cant for church membership)-Does
20 beleebe dat Jonah swallered de
whale?
Applicant (devoutly)-I suttingly
does, deacon.
Presiding Elder-Does yo' beleebe
dat Goliath killed David?
Applicant-Oh, rs positive shuah OBJ
1t, deacon.
Presiding Elder-Does yo' beleebe
dat de lions ate David and dat an ass
slew Samson wifi de jawbone OBJ Phil
istine?
Applicant-Yais, deacon, OATS gospel
trufe.
Presiding Elder-Oof! Yo' mus be-
leebe jais opposite to ev'yt'ing de bible
sails, den. Yo's wuss dan a hertic an
yo' KANT jine dis var chu'ch nohow.
-Harper's Bazaar.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
REV. MARY A. HILLS.

In letter just received from the noted
Evangelist, Rev. Mary A, Hills, she writes
u gladly give my testimony to the healing
properties Of DR.. Kay's Lung Balm, nv
son has had terrible cough every winter
Tor i've years and he took dozens Of bottles
Of the leading cough medicines but nothing
seemed to help him or quiet his congh,
But two csc boxes of DR.. Kay's Lung Balm
has cured him, and 1t has been great re-
lief to other members Of my family when
afflicted with colds.n
We know there never has been medi.
cine TO equal 1t for the lungs, throat or
catarrh. WE GUARANTEE IT to cure even
If all other remedies and doctors have failed.
Why not try it now. 1t costs only 95c a
box at druggists, or sent by mail by DR.. B.
J. Kay Medical Co, Omaha, Neb. Send
Tor booklets. Valuable book on female dis
eases free,
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

Gov. Lee of South Dakota doesn't be-
lieve in taking the word of banks,
b'gosh! They told him they had sew
eral hundred thousand dollars of the
states money, but he wanted to see
it, and so a militia company guarded
the train which brought the actual
cash to the capital, where the governor
counted 1t, bit the pieces to see If
they were genuine, rang them upon
the tables, and then sent 1t all back
again. Gov. Lee isn't taking any
chances-not II he knows.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

A man suspected Of murder was re-
Gently put under hypnotic influence in
Galveston, Tex, and while in that con-
dition was closely examined in the
presence Of number Of witnesses. He
made good many statements he would
never have made had he been con-
scious, but his answers convinced the
police of his innocence, aud he will
probably be set free. In this case the
prisoner expressed perfect willingness
to undergo the experiment, but the in
cident suggests startling possibilities
for the mysterious force we cab nypno-
tism.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

and from being an object of almost
universal aversion and suspicion, bids
fair to become a popular hero. The
particular dog that has brought about
this important state of affairs ia the
property Of City CouciIman H. Bun
gay, of Spokane, Wash, says the ST..
Louis Globe-Democrat. pat" Is the
name of the clever animal. There is
nothing particularly attractive in his
appearance. His lower jaw has that
same ugly appearance that has preju-
diced the public minds against animals
OF this class. 1t is Pats jaw, however,
that has gained him fame. Mr.. Bun
gay has a store in Spokane, and in
front OF his place of business, when
ever the weather would permit, Pat
mas been in the habit Of taking up his
station. His original task was to guard
the store from all the nuisances that
walked in that direction, and In this
capacity he has long been unequaled.
Mr.. Bungay has spent no little time
- "SeS'Ahto hAlll lhdI WHICH, u uOTbt anu
buggy were left in front of the store
1t was the intention to have them re-
main there until the person who left
them returned and took possession.
Several times horses which have been
temporarily stationed in front of the
store have taken the notion to wander
on. Each time Pat has interposed an
objection that always had weight, for
he Is a stocky dog and weighs a good
deal more than his looks would lead
one to think. The climax in Pats ca
reer came few days ago, when, as
he was lying on the steps of the store
apparently sleeping peacefully, a horse
and buggy came dashing down the
street at a tremendous pace. The bug
gy was empty, for the horse had
broken his hitching strap, which was
swinging wildly in the air as the fright
ened animal tore down Sprague street.
Pat comprehended the situation at a
glance. AS the horse neared the Bun
gay store Pat gathered himself to-
gether on the sidewalk and waited. A
moment later the spectators saw a
white dog swinging in all directions
at the end of that portion of the hitch
ing strap which remained attached to
the horse. For few seconds the horse
did not seem to mind the animal that
chung like grim death to the hitching
strap. Pat would swing wide of the
horse and up in the air, and then come
down with thud that made the peo-
pie who heard it sorry for him. Every
time he came down, however, he
braced himself and gave the horses
head vigorous pull. The results of
Pats methods was that within com
paratively short distance the runaway
wGs brought to standstill The dog,
rather scratched and a good deal
bruised, sat calmly down by the foam
ing horse, pulling the strap at inter
walls, as if to say: "You might just as
we'll stop first as last when 1 get hold
of the strap" OF course, there were
any quantity of men ready to hold the
horse after Pat stopped it, although
none of them had exhibited the least
inclination to get in its way while it
was on the run.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

One Of the observed of all observers
at recent tea given by Mrs. Cleveland
to number Of ladies, gentlemen being
barred, was Mrs. PAX Ye, wife of the
minister from Corea. She was clad in
a quaint gown of dark blue brocade
and wore curious head dress which
sparkled with Jewels Mrs. PAX didn't
know word of English and could only
look on, but seemed to enjoy the &C.
casion as much as her more loquacioue
sisters.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
DR. FahrnOy's Big Book.

OF biggest books in the world''
there is no end, but it is believed that
the blank book of greatest weight, size
and bulk belongs to an eccentric ply
stefan OF Baltimore, one DR.. Fahrney.
1t was made in Chicago in 1891. 10
weighs exactly $50 pounds and n
ounces, and has leaves made of tho
very best rope MANILA. The cover Of
this giant of books weighs so pounds
and is provided with two complicated
padloclrs. The book cost the doctor
S65. Boston Journal.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

Musgrove Allen, farmer Of Bass
River, N. j., said a "cuss" word one
day in Trenton, and was arrested and
fined SIS. Mr.. Allen has engaged the
best lawyer in the state to take the
case to the Supreme court, and says
he will spend whole lot of cash to
show Squire Gale that the word is not
profanity. The people Of Bass River
are said to be with Mr.. Allen to man.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

William II. Beaumont Of Brooklyn
sued Nicholas H. Snyder Cor 100000 for
alternating the affections Of his wife.
After hearing mass of testimony
rather discreditable to all parties but
Snyder verdict was given for the de.
tense and the court not only directed
the plaintiff to pay the costs of the
suit, but also imposed a fine of $500
for his impudence in bringing 1t.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
1oo7 RUs. POTATOES pEn ACRE.

Don't believe it, nor did the editor
until he saw Salzer's great farm seed
catalogue. It's wonderful what an ar
ray Of facts and figures and new
things and big yields and great testi-
monials it contains.
Send This Notice and 10 Cents Stamps
to John A. Salzer Seed Co., La Crosse,
Wis, for catalogue and IL rare farm
seed samples, worth $40, to get start.
WIN.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

Willieboy-That doosid Jones girl
tried to be sawcastic at my expense,
but think I made her feel that was
wespected, don't you know.
Hargreaves-Yes; she told me about
it. She said you were positively queen
ly in your indignation.-Ind
Journal
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
Had Been Duck shooting.

Mrs. Blinks-See here, Mr.. b., I
thought you said you had been duck
shooting.
Mr. Blinks-Yes, m dear, been duck
(hicl shooting.
but these ducks you brought home
are tame ducks"
yes, m dear; +amed 'em after I
(hic) shot EN-" New York Weekly.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
ALL ABOUT LINCOLN.
EXTRACTS FROM PAPERS eV
WOULD-BE POLICEMEN.
Some Samples OF the Intelligence Con-
tanned In the Heads OF Men Who
Want to Garry Handouts aud Clubs
In New York.

OR some of those
who see no use In
written civil-ser-
vice examinations
for policemen,
President Roose-
welt had the fol-
lowing extracts ta-
ken from essays on
abraham Lin
coin" written by
unsuccessful appli-
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

N New York the courts have de-
clded that monuments and tombstones
In place are not subject to liens. How
then are the marble workers to get
their pay? But insurance money is
exempt from attachment since 1t is a
fund set apart for the widow and
orphan. In a like spirit, the graves Of
the family are pl detected from desecra-
ton.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
A Fine Arrangement,

"See here, young man." said the
stern father, IF you don't come home
earlier after this I'll know the reason
why"
"Glad to hear 1t, governor; that will
save all explanations on my part
Detroit Free Press.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
"Don't You Remembers"

When you were boys and girls and
walked miles to see the elephant come
into town, and even ran away from
school to carry water to help make the
pink lemonade of commerce, you
played at circus for the remainder of
that summer. What fun you had keep
ing the other boys and girls from ascer-
tanning what was going on at the very
private rehearsals of the performance.
How grand you felt when you struck
off on the homemade printing press
that you had built from an old ink roll
Ter and small wooden picture frame
some handbills that read, in various as
sorted type:
....,....,,...'.' '''.'...,.......,
Coming July 81 Big Show Re-
servedseats 5 PINS Admishun
IS Pins Children as small AS
Skinny Powers pins Be sure
!: To See the only trained ele-
plant Captured at Jacub's Dam
at Benedict's barn at 2 O'clock
Lemonaid 2 pins extry!!!
Don't you remember?
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
Crisis Almost Due.

Madeline-Frances says she knows
Francis loves her now. 1t is as to
whether his love will remain after she
is old, that she is in doubt about.
Gwendolin--Well. she hasn't long to
wait before she fnds out.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
The Worst to Come.

Mother-Dear me! the baby has
swallowed that piece of worsted!
Father-That's nothing to the yarns
she'll have to swallow if she lives to
grow up.-Boston Transcript
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
The Outlook Good.

She-You know, dear, we won't get
any Of fathers money while he lives.
Hell know, but he's going to reside
with us, and you're going to do thel
cooking. Let's hope for the best.
Cleveland World.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
Human Nature.

A man may battle against fate for
fifty years and when he finally does
reach the long fought for goal his
friends will invariably remark: "Well,
that lucky old fool~-New York Jour-
nal.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
Anpreolntlon of Experience

"Why do you think so much more of
your father than you did before you
were married?"
Because l had never lived with any
other man up to that time. Detroit
Free Press.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
DOG STOPS RUNAWAYS
nANoS ON TO THE HORSE UN-
TIL HE STOPS.
He Is Popular Hero-Dragged and
Thumped for Squares, But Was Re-
warded by Finally stopping the Ami
NAL.

HE bulldog has
found a new mis-
sion, His peculiar
tenacity Of grip,
c o m b ined with
flrmness of pur-
pose, has made him
of service in a good
cause. He has be-
come an important
factor in the stop
ming Of r1InaWavs
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

It's now the boy who slept SO .ate,
Despite persuasive din,
10 out at dawn, that he may skate
Before the thaw sets in.
Washington Star.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

Long cloal1s of brocaded silk, cloth
and uncut velvet, made with bishop
sleeves and trimmed with fur, are
worn with evening dress.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
Time to Learn.

Q Man Overboard-Help! Helpl
CStranger-Phuy don't yea swim?
II don't know how"
"Begorry, we've got an illigenS
chance to learn"
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

Being out Of debt sometimes indl-
Gates that man is prudent, but oc-
casionally 1t merely shows that his &C.
quaintances are wise.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
A sInennra.

Mrs. Flynn-An' phwat's yer son
Moike doin' now, Mrs. Casey?
Mrs, Casey-Shure, Moike amt do
in anything, Mrs. Flynn. He's got a
government job Judge.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
WIZ 1t Kaan2

In reply 20 correspondents asltlnR Mr. sneep
about his oporto Grape Juice he says he will war
tanS II 20 keep any length OF time In bottles IL
they are kept full and wei. oorked The iuico IN
not likely 10 keep long after allowed 10 come in
contact With the atmosphere over 10 degrees tenn
perAture. IL Is excellent for invads,
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
NO.TO.RAc For FIFTY GENTS.

Over 404, 900 cured Why not let No-To-Ba0
regulate or remove your desire for tobacco.
Saves money, makes health and manhood.
Cure guaranteed, SOC and S1.00, all druggists.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

If o pinch of powdered alum is
stirred into the batter of which ginger
snaps are to be made the snaps will DO
more crisp and brittle.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

One reason why The world gains
knowledge so slowly, is that every
child must find out for itself that fire
Is hot.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
WHERE CORK COMES FROM.

The great cork forests of the world
are in southern Europe, especially in
Spain and Portugal. The trees will
grow and even thrive in America, but
the cork produced is of an inferior
quality.
The Spanish cork forests cover an
area of 100000 square acres, those of
Catalonia and Barcelona taking first
rank. Cork trees growing near the
seacoast are subject to fungous
growth which renders their product
useless for purposes of commerce.
Cork trees are not strong enough to
stand the operation of barking till
they are fifteen years old. After that
time they may be parked every three
years without detriment and will con-
tinue to thrive and bear for about 15O
years.
Cork of the first stripping is called
corcho bornio, or virgin cork; that of
the second stripping is known as pelas
The work of removing the bark from
the trees is done in summer time by
men, who are paid about 60 cents a
day. After the bark is stripped it is
boiled, sometimes in the woods, but
more often in large caldrons at the
cork factories, for the purpose Of in
creasing its thickness and elasticity.
In Spain, Italy, Turkey, Morocco and
Algeria, the countries where cork is
most plentiful, it is used for many
things besides bottle-stoppers. For in
stance, bee-hives, kitchen pals, culin-
airy utensils, collins, images, crosses,
cabins, drinking vessels, pillows, shoes,
armor, boats and many articles of furn-
iture are made from cork.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
RECENT INVENTIONS.

A recently patented chopping ak has
its head in three sections, the blade
having a recess cut in each side to re-
ceive the ends of the head portion,
which is hinged in the head the two
back pieces surrounding the handle and
being attached to the blade by means
of a screw.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

A western exchange observes: after
all, it isn't much of crime to rob a
pool room" No, it is more of mir
acle.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

Men and sheep are generally unsatis'
fed unless they follow the prevailing
fashion.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

The niger In the executive council
wood pile at Boston positively refuses
to be cut down.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04
Built on n Poor Plan.
HE.

have NO wealth to bring to you,
My little one, my queen.
But I've heart that's pure and true,
And a record that is clean.
SHE.
Begone! Begone! You make me sick
You aren't half man,
For no one but the poorest stick
Is built on such plant
Cleveland Leader.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

Natures that can brook defeat better
than delay generally suffer defeat.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-03-04

It 10 a wise plan to wait until some
body else recalls the fact that you made
a prediction that came out right.