The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-01-31

with whom she comes in contact; but
the fact is, we are considering the eff
feet of the contact upon the girl, and
the effect of Overlooking the big brother
and Overlooking the little brother is
now and then unfortunate, retarding
the development of individuality and
Self-rel1ance. Yet in nine cases out OF
| ten 1t is help to the DEVELOPMENT of
that bower Of hearty fellowship and
! OF family tenderness of which all
| through life she Will stand so much in
need. That brothers and sisters, little
and big, grow nearer to each other, is
one OF Our great home questions. We
suggest 1T as an admirable topic for
! some OF the clubs that are struggling
with the problems of the universe. And
/ no part of the whole study undertaken
by the so-called mothers clubs is of
more Importance than that which re-
lateS to the cultivation of the affection
OF brothers and sisters in the home.
These two comrades, the big brother
and the little brother, are the first
that draws the young girls he away
from itself. They belong esI lily to
the period when she is in the ,.ume. 1t
will only take the first half OF the first
year at boarding school for her 70 find
that girl comrade who, once enthroned,
dethrones for the time being the home
loves, big and little. Lest this seem
too sweeping an assertion, let me ask
! the middle-aged woman to look back
| to their own first violent friendship for
! that other older girl. Notwithstanding
! this friendship, parents, brothers and
sisters still exist. Duties are still to
! be en1oYed, but the heart is waking
up. The young soul is testing its ca
pacity for admiration and alteration.
For the time being there is nothing in
! the universe like this "other girl
! friend
The friendship has almost the charm
of first love, and does no special mis-
chief if only the first love comes along
in its due and proper time. The glamour
and blindness of love is one of its
characteristics also l know a girl of 16
the devotion of whose whole heart was
expended upon a woman of 81, with
high cheek bones, the scar of an acct
dent upon her chin, a turned-up nose
and liquid blue eyes, both of which
were cross-eyed. But then she had a
llly-white skin, a gentle voice. a lovely
manner; she played the piano bewitch-
lngly and wore beautiful clothes, and
seemed worlds above her to that little
girl OF 10, to whom she was very kind
PARENTS little imagine the strength
and intensity of these attachments on
the part of girls whose emotional ma
lures are Just waking into life, and
VINO are searching for nothing else un-
DER the sun so eagerly as they are
searching for something on which they
can throw themselves away. In other
words, the consequences of having a
great wealth of devotion to expend
somewhere makes the whole nature
alert for something to which it may be
given. At 43 a woman can expend her
directions, having found no use for
them before. upon a cause with a
capital &C" but Is or 80 years younger
what can be expected but that the
heart shall find natural outlet in the
direction Of some woman friend.
That child is happy who, in the fer
Vor of the first self-spending, pours if
upon girl a little wiser, a little older.
a little more Conscientious or religious
or intelligent than herself Then the in
huence becomes helpful, stimulating
and means blessing to the life One
strong affection of this kind keeps a
young girl from great many foolish
lntlmacies. If she tells one girl every
thlng she knows, she is much less like
~ to tell 80 girls almost everything she
knows. The affection becomes at once
a delight and a safety valve If the
right young people have come together,
Tor them to be very, very fond of each
other is the best thing that could hap
pen to them during LIES formative
stage. The choice is too often an I'M
wise one, and then the pity of it can
hardly be told. These girl friendships
come when the nature is at its most
lmpressionable time, and while it
would take volume to tell the value
ana advantage of good companionship.
1t would take library to follow the
effects into the lives of the women of
To-Day of that friendship and compan-
ionship which has not been good.
In many lives there grows up a noble
sentiment we'll worthy of the name of
irlendshlp between young women who
nave known each other in youth, a.
friendship crowned with all such mo-
tives as dignity life, a friendship that
Wnlle 1t may not be the best that life
could nave given, is yet we'll worth
having and worth pricing as a gift of
COD But for the majorities of women
these early friendships give place in
que time to that which is really the
love of the lifetime. The "other girl''
Whom we adored proves to have a
eIother or our own brother has a
friend, or somewhere in some fair dav
OF life we discover that there is a love
whose mastery over the whole being is
quite a different thing from the fervid
friendships of our schoolgirl DAYS. We
know, then, that all other affections
were but the opening viStas leading To
thlS new world. Now we enter this
~" WI III, oelOIS 10 IL, are part of il.
can feel its significance and compre-
memo us mysteries and recognize the
SfaclousneSS and the greatness with
winch God meant every true WomanII-
life should be crowned. Now the value
OF that early habit of looking to the
strong and sturdy manhood to do and
dare brave things shows itself. That
which we expected our own brother TO
De, we expect, in still greater degree of |
MN who is to be closer than the
brother. Now the value of that nro-
tectlve and motherly love for the little i
brother reveals itself. for in a certain
sense every woman is mother and ten
der caretaker for the one beloved. Now I
too. the value of the friendship Of
woman for woman reveals itself. and
the old friends who kept by our side |
as we came nearer to the great love of |
Ire time, are even dearer than when !
we had no other friend. The love that
leans, the love that is leaned upon. the |
love that shares and helps, then all
unite in happy combination in the love
that simply loves
And the same kind of a heart in a /
young girl that reaches up with a warmth |
OF .reverent appreciation to the bip
orotner, reaches down with an almost |
prOtectiVeneSs to the jittIa faI
low who adores her in his turn She is
ike his mother. only she is prettier
There are good many times when the
small boy, especially the unmitigated
small boy. is bore. He has an incon-
wanted. and of staying Just when Won
wish he would go and of never being any I
where when you hunt for him. When
you feel as If you wanted to show YOUR
friends how lovely he is. he appears
soiled from his play and gummy from
his SWeetmeatS From him tho ,,pa--