The Somerset reporter. [volume] (Skowhegan, Me.) 1868-1909, 1897-08-12
KELLEY NOT FIRST.
A CURE FOR DRUNKENNESS RE-
PORTED FROM THE LONG AGO.

]
Doctors" Simple Remedies the
Medicine" Cured Joe Robinson With
out Asking the doctor"
1t was about the medicated whisky
cure which we proposed to speak. To
Dr. Kelley, who, living down at
Dwight is almost neighbor, credit is
generally given for being the first per
son who employed the pharmacopGia
for the purpose of killing a drunkard s
appetite But Dr. Kelley Is by no
means entitled to this credit The first
physician whose medicine ever cured
drinking man of his thirst was long
haired, specialized old tourist who called
himself 'the Indian DOCTOR" and who
operated down in the neighborhood of
Belpre o.
The doctor did not tell the secret
of his medicament, but three or four
boys who lived near the farmhouse
where he boarded had an mixing, be
cause the boys had the contract for
catching the toads for which the doctor
paid tnem ~ cents dozen.
While the Doctors abode has been
spoken Of as farmhouse it was more
than that, for, being near a stockyard,
where trains LAY over, p" it was also a
boarding house, or tavern, whittier the
droyers came for entertainment.
Among the stockmen whose duties
brought them frequently to the yards,
1 al.
ing place. was a man named Joe Robin
SON. who had drunk whisky all the way
from St Louis to Baltimore, with spe-
clal reference to Piedmont and the
country along the II mile grade of the
Baltimore and Ohio. Robinson was a
firm, vigorous and vigilant drinker, one
who allowed no guilty dramshop to es-
cape He was such a shining light that
at least 2 temperance societies were
working upon him at once, for 1t was
known that the credit for his reforma-
ton would mean much. But he resisted
all their entreating efforts.
This brings things up to one May
evening. Robinson had arrived at
Belpre with seven cars of hogs and
large, commodious and farreaching jag.
He took the hogs into the stockyards
and the jag to the city of Parkersburg,
W. Va, just across the river for he
wanted to trim and ornament 1t little
before retiring Now it so occurred that
it was a damp night, and Harry Stone
and Hughey Drain, the boys who had
the contract for supplying hoptoads to
the salye making Indian doctor, set out
on their own hook and without consul
tation with their employer to get flour
bag full of toads They were eminently
successful, and at 8 O'Clock they APP
peared at the boarding house with
peck of kicking, piping, shricking spoil.
For good measure they had ON this oc-
cusion added three belated garter snakes,
two lizards and boot owl. The family
was not happy.
Mrs. Bruce directed the boys to carry
their burden, of the character of which
she had no idea, up to the doctors
room, he being out. The boys did So
or at least they thought they did-but
they turned the wrong corner at the
head Of the stairs and deposited the
sack in the room to be occupied by Joe
Robinson.
Mr.. Robinson came home from Par
kersburg about midnight The evening
had been most successful one. He had
found 3 new saloons. He entered the
room in the boarding house with the
presumption that he was either the car
of Russia or Napoleon Bonaparte, but
was not quite sure which. In his doubt
he collided with the paper flour bag
full of hoptoads and things There were
few words of wicked derivation, and
then, turning up the light, Mr. Robin
son looked to see what he had found.
Whore you, feller?" he inquired,
addressing the bag Wont answer,
hey? Too p'lite to talk to a drover,
huh? 'Lri Take thatr' And he aimed
an unsteady kick ut the doctors ingre-
dents. Then things happened.
An active garter snake left the bag
in midair, and, alighting on picture
frame, twisted and squirmed before Mr..
Robinson view. Then the toads began
raining around him, and when he felt
most surprised and interested the owl
came forth and few at the lamp. The
sack fell to the floor and lizard shot
into heightened view and the rest of the
hoptoads leaped out into comparative
liberty. Mr.. Robinson clambered in
fright upon the bed and found himself
in the presence of half dozen of the
batraohian invaders which had been
flung upon the counterpart by tho force
of that very vigorous and masterful
kick. He crept behind the bureau and,
lol garter snake dropped therefrom
and made for the shelter of the closet.
In the middle of the floor there were,
he believed, about g. 052 varied kinds of
hopping visitors, and with II wailing
cry Mr., Robinson crashed through the
vortex and made for the door and bolted
for the night outside.
The next morning very pale and I'M
strung man appeared at the farm board
ing house and answered to the name of
Joe Robinson. He went up to his apart
ment and looked about for some signs
of the visitation of the night before, but
the toads and things, more frightened
than he, had escaped by the same door
through which he had gone while the
careful hired girl had gathered up the
-four bag and burned it. Mr. Robinson
sat down and thought for IA moment,
and then he said, addressing himself to
the picture frame from which the snake
had dangled, that this was the last
time He had had enough More would