The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1897-05-17
WOES OF A BROOKLYNITE.
HumOrOusIy Set Forth by n New
York Correspondent.

York Correspondent.
New York Letter in the Chicago Chronicle.
One of the funny things in New York
funny to a newcomer-is the hippant way
in which the resident of Manhattan re-
fers to the resident of Brooklyn. The
fact that the Brooklyn man may have his
business in New York. and perhaps spend
most of his time in New York does not
change the situation. A Brooklyn man,
like the New Jersey man, is the butt
of ridicule for the New Yorker in every
phase of his existence. And another
funny man will often, when he is over in
York, turn against the town where his
home is, and berate it worse than the man
of Manhattan.
But the story that follows will be a bet
ter explanation than any introduction. The
New York man begins TO talk. He said to
me:
"Some day shall write a story, and the
title will be, Why Did Not Eat Dinner
with an Acquaintance in Brooklyn
Somewhere l had met an individual
who was about perfecting a patent that
was to remove the hosiery from Aladdin's
lamp. l do not know why he bounced
upon me as a victim. There is not a
mechanical bump on our genealogical tree.
! gave up my resolution to eVade the man.
Wherever / went / met him, and always
did he recur to the fortune which lurked
about his patent. And when he had fas-
tened his snaky eyes upon me one day and
had asked me to dine with him in Brook
lyn, when he would show me his drawings
and explain the details, / accepted. As
the day came nearer, my fears were in
tensihed.
But the fairies, who are always good to
the Irish, came my way. ] was being buff
feted in Broadway one afternoon when the
patent man from Brooklyn grabbed one OF
my arms and opened up on one Of my ears
as one does on a transmtter. The engage
ment to dine was off. And I listened to
his tale of woe
" 1t is my luck he began. 4 have never
had anything good happen since | went 10
Brooklyn 10 live. | went there for the same
old reason that 100000 others went there
cheap rent and a yard. 1 had to have yard
room for my children. When / lived In
New York they had no place to play ex-
cept In the ash cans, and that kept them
half naked, because was not able to buy
clothes for them. The ash cans and garb-
age barrels that line the sidewalks in
front Of a tenement row In New York will
wear out a suit OF clothes every week that
the wearer comes In contact with the re-
ceptacles. j do not know why some chill
dren seek the filthiest places 10 play. Mine
always did when ] lived in New York
Zone OF my children IS a boy. / would
not want him to know that / said Il, but
he Is about as tough. as they grow. When
/ lived In New York there was a grave
stone cutter IN my block. One day / no.
ticed that he was moving, and, being OF
an inquisitive nature asked him why.
lie stated TO me cOnfdentially that ne was
afraid my boy would get killed and that
/ would call upon him (the grave-stono
cutter 10 carve some tender sentiment on
a gravestone 10 go at my boys grave. In
Il
low him to do Il. and that would break up
the friendship between the two families. 80
he concluded TO leave the neighborhood. /
told him I was going 20 move myself. He
was interested OF courses, to know where.
I told him Brooklyn. lie seemed relieved.
lie said he was going TO Jersey City. He
knew / would never cross two rivers 20
hunt him up.
but this Is only incidental 20 my roa-
son for canceling the engagement for din
ner ] have had more trouble IN Brook
lyn We have never been able to M
social engagement since we have lived
there. When / went home last night /
learned that my boy was IN the police sta
ton ! would not like for him 10 know
said d. but / was not surprised 20 hear g.
III there was any surprise IN my makeup
II was that the boy had not got there be-
fore The detention Of the boy was al
the request Of the complaining witness. "A
Dutch butcher, whose customer I had
been. That IL what made me hot.
had tried 20 De content with some or the
tough meat hc had sent me, because 1