davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
PITH AND POINT

Ruling Passion. = Sprockett -
'We've got baby at our house" Ham
del Bars-'You don't say so! 90 or ss7T's
Boston Transcript.
She Was Talker.-'sThat's speak
ing likeness of your first wife" II sup
pose the artist couldn't help it--and 4
had him paint it in the most quiet
colors, too. Cleveland Plain Dealer.
A Convincing Circumstance.-"He
is very poor judge of human nature"
remarked Miss Cayenne, thoughtfully.
''What leads you to that conclusiong~
HE has such good opinion of him
self."-Washingto Star.
-A.-"Well, and how did you sleep
last night? Did you follow my advice
and begin counting?" B--"Yesl I
counted up to $4,000" A.-"And then
you fell asleep?" B.-'No; then it was
time to get up."-Ht-Bits.
A Come Down.-"Poor MaGge! Be-
have such an elegant turnout" "Yes;
and now she has bicycle and bloomer
suit, and won't turn out for anything
less than trolley car. "-IndiaDapolis
Journal.
The Fond Mother-"E Everybody says
he is such pretty babyl I'm sure the
poet was right when he said that
Heaven lies about US in our infancy"
The Uncle (unfeelingly)-"B he
should have added: so does everybody
else.' Life.
How do the children of the school
take to the idea of contributing their
pennies to send the teacher awayP"
asked the superintendent. "oh, they
are enthusiastic over il. The farther
away the better, they say" replied the
Observation-Disclosures Commercial Tri-
bune.
Her Clever Device.-"Flossie didn't
have to write much of graduating es-
say" 'Why not?'' ''The title of it was
so long" what was it?" sit was
Whence Does the Human Soul Derive
the Remarkable Power of Investing Ex-
ternal Circumstances with the Lurid
Hue of Its Own Feelings?' "-Chicagc
Record
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
SATAN ON A BEER KEG.
COmmOtiOn Caused by a Hungry Ape
in a Dutchman's Household.

COmmOtiOn Caused by a Hungry Ape
in n Dutchman's Household.
A short time ago the police station at
Apeldoorn, in Holland, was telephon-
ically informed by a maiden lady of the
name of Sprank that she, her two sis
tiers, all the maids, and the stranger
within her gate had locked themselves
up each in her own room, and were at
present in terror of their lives by reason
of "a man in the Kitchen The tele-
phone went on to say that the bur-
glar in question had emptied the con-
tents of the plate basket with a crash
upon the ground, and that he seemed at
present to be cooking something at the
family stove.
In consequence of this message three
trustworthy agents of the Apeldoorn
police took their revolvers and sabers
and marched to the assistance of the
Misses Sprank. They found, after fore
ing shutter and getting into the kitch-
en-, that something was certainly cook
ing on the stove, for certain meats had
been burned to a cinder. These, how
ever, were merely the fragments of the
servants supper, which had been pre-
the footsteps of the unseen invader.
On the ground they also discovered the
forks and spoons and the emptied plate
basket, but the kitchen itself was void
of any burglarious body.
Then the Apeldoorn agents drew
their swords, prepared their lanterns
and descended into the beer cellar.
Here they caught the malefactor.
Looming out in the darkness was a
large beer barrel, and seated solemnly
on the beer barrel was very small ape,
with the fragments of a loaf of bread
by its side, its attitude suggestive of
peace at last and blissful repose. He
had not tapped the beer. As the bur-
glar entirely refused to leave the bar
rel of his own free will. he was carried
upstairs, and, after being securely
strapped down. wheeled off to the po-
lice station. The appearance of a small
ape in child's carriage, surrounded by
armed guards. is an unusual one for
peaceful country town, but the hood
was kept down and the station safely
reached. The ape was eventually re-
stored to its home-a small travelling
nagerie.-Philadelph Record.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
Total Disability,

\ dejected-looking Irishman entered.
the Cflice of an accident insurance com
pany not long ago, and handing soiled
and crumpled paper to the clerk in
charge, said: There's me policy. and
it's mesilf wants it paid up this dav.
sorr." On what do you base your
claim for total disability" inquired
the clerk. after a comprehensive sur
vey OF the sturdy though sh:ftless-look
ing man who stood leaning against the
desk. Sure and it's mesilf that came
over to this country to be a butler in
the furrst families returned the Irish
man. sUlkily. and havin' no ricom-
merdation- Oh was wakes widout a
place; and whin OF got wan. the very
next day me feet, bad cess to EN-.
tripped under me, and broke foive ILL
gait plates and three cups av coffee.
And they discharged me, and Diver n
stroke av wurrk can Oh get since. And
if that amt total disability it's mesilf
would like to know swhat IS ?'-Youth's
Companion.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
LIFE LARGER IS TO-DAY.


pass; ~
Men gaze no longer through half Opaque
glass,
But with great lenses n3e-cfr,, g..
Behold heavens spaces vast, each sun and
star, '--'~-
Traversing miles by millions in one span;
The universe pays tribute unto man.
Men now see widely in a day or year.
BY science and invention made most clear
a million things once hidden in the mists:
Anu nov nov with sharpened hearing each man
To secrets all made plain; mapped out, re-
For ages from the wisest men concealed
When grumblers loud bemoan the good
old days.
Consent thou not, for in a thousand ways
Inc gooo ZOO ne" days are broadcast, brightest.
And in them life enlarged finds newer
zest
Than when men CROPPED half blind in foggy
Slaves unto narrow grooves and circum-
stance.
Mankind now moves with steadier. nobler
With knowledge lighting paths made
smooth and wide
keen-brained Invention and well-tested
Producing powers obedient to his will.
Each one well-trained giant, every wheel
Ioiling with sinews made of steam and
steel.
No more does superstition dim his mind,
No longer prejudice his vision blind:
his views OF God are kindlier than of
yore,
His days of mental slavery are Ger,
Inc while from mountain peaks his thank
full soul
Sees prospects vast before its sight unrolI.
And in these better days each passing
hour
Enlarges with some new device his power.
Breaks from his limbs some fetter of the
past,
Lights some dark cloud which once his
skies o'ercast
They lack true wisdom who mourn times
of old,
These times more glorious are thousand
L EDGAR JONES.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24

wait, and in the meantime his eyes
wandered about the richly-furnished
room.
These fine fixin's," he unused. ''air
bought with my money. Them easy
chairs. an that cyarpet. my money paid
fer. An them picturs. too. an that
pianer. I've been humpin' myself day
in an day out, year arter year. a-makin'
an savin' money jest SOS Bob Herring
toms wife and gals could hev all them
pooty things, while Liza an my girls
hes never he'd rothin'."
Bob Harrington came in ut last, as
smiling and affable as you please
Good morning. Mr.. Skrimp.' he said.
Il am glad 10 see you. hear you have
not been we'll
mo. hain't felt we'll lately"
Well. what can do for you to-day,
Mr.. Skrimp?"
II rode over" Shrimp began TO say,
ito see erbout thet money"
Yes, yes. I'm glad you came. but
you see we are not in position TO do
anything now. The matter is in the
courts, and Will be adjusted in time. All
YOU can do is to wait" Anal almost be
fore Shrimp realized it. be- found him
self gently workc ii out of the room and
the door closed after him.
AS S!lrimp rode slowly aIor~ on his
homeward way. he fell TO bordering
very seriously over what had tranSpired
in the last few days. and At last he
asked himself:
What is er teller ter do with his
money? IF he buys Ian he don need.
il is Jest er 'cumbTance on i'm an Their
taxes eats II up. Fl he loans II he gifts
heat outten it. An eff he buys too much
stock it eats its head of" and he shook
his head despiiringly.
Just then he came even with Smiths.
and Smith, being out in front, invited
Slime to stop for dinner.
.'Thankee," he said, but l guess I'd
better jog along"
But Smith insisted. and Slime yielded
and followed into the house.
He was introduced to Mrs Smith. and
was struck with her happy, healthy.
contented look. and he could not help
contrasting her with his own pale
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
"FLlEs" ON VESSELS.
Not the Little Insect, but q Weather
Yane to Aid I'm Steering.

Not the Little Insect, hut q weather
Vane to Aid I'm Steering.
The Ely" at the masthead is often
used as a sign to steer by. It revolves
on a pivot, and hence, like a weather
vane, shows the direction from which
the wind is blowing; whereas, flag
attached to a halyard streams direct
ly astern, or at an angle more or less
affected by the speed and course of the
vessel. A glance at the fly having shown
the winds direction, a glance at the
pinnacle shows from what point of the
compass it comes. Then, by watching
the fly, and thus keeping the ship al
ways at the same angle to the wind,
you are able to keep her on her course.
The ships of different nations have
distinctive flies. The American and
the English fly is little triangular
pennon. German ships often have
small tapering bag at the masthead,
and French vessels 'dog-vane"-a line
of corks with colored feathers on a
wire. The steamers of the French line
from New York to Havre have a dog
vane at each masthead-it is one of
their distinguishing marks.
Steering by the fly is one way of
steering by the wind. but there are
other tricks for finding the wind-point.
A sailor can find the point of a stiff
breeze by simply letting it blow against
his face. In a light air, almost a calm,
he lifts his hat and turns his head until
he feels the cool breath on his moist
brow, which is far more sensitive than
his sun-tanned face; or he moistens the
end of his hand, and turning it toward
the wind, waves it gently back and
forth and to and fro, until the GOODNESS
of the air is felt on one side of that
narrow surface and not on the other
In heavier airs he will moisten the palm
of the hand and hold il fiat to the wind.
The wind-point being found, the ship
is sailed as close to the wind as pos
sible, the helmsman keeping his eye on
the sail-leech. The least culver, and
turn of the wheel keeps her of
enough to fill her sails; but with an ex-
perienced hand on the wheel there will
be no CULVER along the leech. For an "a.
b. can tell by the "feel' of the helm
when the ship is about to come up into
the wind. As 3 vessel comes up" the
strain on the rudder is lessened, and by
quickly checking her, he keeps the
sails rap full and asleep"-keeps them
from quivering-and holds her on her
course without so much as glance at
the compass.-Gustav Kobbe, in St.
Nicholas
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24

x-RayfnE a Painting.

Not only have the Roentgen rays been
employed with success to test the gem
uineness of jewels, and also, it is said,
to detect flaws in armor plate, but a
story comes from Germany that they
have proved the authenticity of a paint
ing which was attributed to Albrecht
Duerer: 1t was head of Christ painted
on the wood, and supposed to have been
executed in 1891. 1t is very dingy with
age, and has probably been restored"
more or less. After several efforts q
photograph was successfully taken by
means of the Roentgen rays, which re-
yealed much that the eye could not per-
ceive. The features of the thorn
crowned Jesus, the drapery about the
shoulders, and the hands which grasped
the latter appeared much more distinct
" than in the painting. But there also
came to light a Latin inscription in
quaint Gothic characters, the mono
gram of some grand duke flor whom,
perhaps, the picture was painted), the
artists initials, and the date "1524."
This date was accepted as the correct
one. The photograph reveals the grain
of the wood and the fiber of silk hand.
kerehief stretched on it--Chicago In
ter Ocean.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
Not InIHchN-

y well-krOwn woman of title had sev-
: eral times had 4 man from the cycle
makers to execute various repairs ia
! her machine-Tepairs which were nee
essa-y or account OF the firms careless,
workmanship. Her ladyship's little girl
happened to be watching the work with
great interest, and remarked to the me-
chanic:
Don't you think mammals very un-
lucky with her bike?''
''Unlucky, did yer say?'' was the
mans reply. Why, her ladyship's alive
still, amt she? Well, some of our Gus.
toners n't-"--London Mail.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
Tennyson nt TnbIe.

1t is seldom that great man is great
er than his work, and the following
story from DR.. Max Muller's reminis-
cences in Cosmopo1is will not dis
prove this fact. Once during the long
vacation Tennyson went 20 Oxford and
DR.. Muller invited him to dinner and
breakfast. my wife. young house
keeper, did her best for her unexpected
guest. He was known to be a gour-
manCs and at dinner he was evidently
put out by finding the sauce with the
salmon was not the same one he pre-
ferred. He was pleased. however. with
the wing of a chicken, and said it was
the only advantage of being a poet
laureate. that he generally received the
liver-wing of a chicken. The next
morning at breakfast we had rather
plumed ourselves on being able to
get a dish of outlets, and were not q
little surprised when our guest ar
rived to see him whip of the cover of
the hot dish, and to hear the exclama-
ton: Mutton chops! The staple of
every bad inn in Engiandi' However,
these were but minor matters, though
not without importance in the eyes OF
a young wife to whom Tennyson had
been like one of the immortals."-
Youths Companion. =
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24

Mrs. Slogan (at an L station}-Don't
sou ever trust man as long as you
live. They are all frauds, every one of
'em.
Daughter-Why. ma! All?
Every one, no exception at all. Look
at that man near the news stand. The
brute,''
WHY. he looks the very picture OF
pentleness and refinement"
..Oh. yes; but he's standing there gaz-
ing at rat poison poster, all the same
III bet his wife has pet poodle. ~.
I. Weekly.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
The Cheerful Idiot.

$50 you say began the moderately
new boarder, that he speeulated on a
large scale exclusively. May / inquire
what was the use of this large scale?"
''Glad to answer YOU" replied the
Cheerful Idiot. He has to have it for
weighing the consequences. Indian
apcSis Journal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24

The Magnet I'm the Extraction of Ores.
At the Franklin furnace. in New Jer-
sey, an Edison plant is being operated
with magnets for extracting ore. The
magnets are arranged in sets and oc-
cupy a length of about one mile, the
ore passing this line. The magnets are
arranged in tiers. of five. The first or
upper ones are very weak, but they
gradually increase until those at the
bottom are very powerful. It is claimed
that the first set of magnets will extract
CO per cent. of the oxide OF iron; the
second set takes up about rs per cent,
and in some cases IS per cent. has been
secured. The ore is ground very fine
and the experiment has thus far prov en-
great suecess.-N. Y. Ledger.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24

H-WeII, what are you suilking about
now?
She Severely why was you so cool
to Mrs. Masham this evening?
H@Was 1? I didn't know it.
She-Oh yes, you did, wretch You
were afraid of arousing my suspicious
by showing your real feelings Oh, you
.lissembleri-N. Y. Truth.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24

Gobang-Faint heart never won fam
lady, you know.
Grymes-Oh, l don't know. Some
widows are fair Iadies.-N. 7. Truth.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24
Not q Common Carrier.

George, wish you'd leave this little
package at the express Office"
ME carry bundle2 I guess not.
Besides. I've got to lug both my tires
and handle bar down to the repair
shop."-Clevelnnd Plain Dealer.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24

The average cost of criminal prose
cutions in England at present is & %
each.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-06-24

i'm Melbourne a woman gets two
pence-halfpenny for making a shirt,
while Chinaman gets fivepence for
washing it.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1897-06-19
BuZ uur.

The membes.s and friends OF
Reamv's Memorial Baptist Church
at Horntown VIII hold a bazaar to
represent the seven days of the week
on the 18th and 14th OF July. Dinner
and supper will be served-dinner
on European style. Unique enter
tainment may be expected both
evenings. A very pretty and durable
quilt and an elegant afghan will be
presented to the person or persons
guessing the nearest number of peas
and shot in four and SIX ounce bot
ties. We hope to have the hearty
co operation Of our sister churches
in this effort. Public cordially in
vited. Proceeds to furnish the church
If weather should be inclement next
fair day. See posters later.
COMMITTEE.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1897-06-19
yy,cy,nNraSEuG.
Mr.. Bert Styles, of Norfolk, is a
guest of his father this week.

Mr.. Bert Styles, of Norfolk, is
guest of his father this week.
Bicycle fad has revived in Wacha-
nreasue. Rev. G. e. b. Smith has
white Flag
Mrs. Clara Garrison, who has beer
confined to her bed for several days
is now convalescent.
Misses Eulala Dunton and Maggie
Wescott. Of Nas>a wadoX, favored ou7
town with n visit this week.
ChilGrcn's day exercises, observed
last Sunday in Upshurs Neck, were
rated the best in the history OF the
church.
Misses Lula Wiclls and Clara Hnnf
returned from Blackstone Female
Institute this week. They are con
templating trip through the North
west States soon.
Mr.. Tom Heath. u Bib. Lit Of
the r. NJ. c. system, at Bedford City
passed his examination with distinc
ton. and will enter the college al
Ashland next September.
Mrs. Margaret BELL, widow of Lo
rcnzo d. Bell, accidentally slipped to
the ground on Sunday last, fracturins
her hip. Owing TO her advanced age
her recovery from the injury is
doubtful.
Drums are still biting at Little
Machipuneo Inlet. The last catcl
reported was eight and n half, a hal
being appropriated by 4 voraciou'
shark Us the ninth was drawn in 10y
Capt. jimmie Coleburn.
Levin, the little son of Capt. l.. e
Core, fell into an old sink near til,
oyster house, or Monday, sustaining
among other injuries, II ragged
wound of the leg. which was skill
fully dressed by Mr. Bernard LeCato
The little patient is LOW doing well
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1897-06-19
ISiQNOIil.

Mrs. Wray and son have returned
to their home at Newport News.
Miss Maude Goodwin is visiting rel
atives and friends at Horntown.
Mrs. A. w. Short has returned from
a visit to her sisters in Baltimore.
Quite number of our farmers are
shipping Irish potato this week.
Mr. Eugene Mason has been home
from Richmond on visit to his wife
and children.
Misses Agnes .Sturgis, Mary Hin
man and May Bloxom attended the
commencement at Onancock last
week.
Rev. w. C. Walden, who has been
confined for some time with a factur
ed bone, we are glad to say, is i'm
proving.
The plan has been received for the
new Methodist Church at this place
and work will begin on same at ar
early day.
The ladies of Bloxom will hold {
festival OF July End, for the benefit
of the Methodist Sunday school, at
this place.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1897-06-19
Mnrsarc. Academy Commencement.
The following students received
prizes in the classes named:

The following students received
prizes in the classes named:
PRIMARY DEPARTMENT.
General Standing-The Young Car.
observation-disclosures w. Taylor.
Second Observation-Disclosures
Water Babies-Mary E. Wilkins.
Geography and History-The Old
South-Mildred B. Brent.
First Observation-Disclosures
Wonder Book-Ruth A. Kellnm.
General History -Hawthorne's Tan
glewood Tales-Helen M. Jollifre.
ACADEMIC DEPARTMENT.
Edward G. Observation-Disclosures,
Algebra, History of the United
States-Tom Browns School Days
Ethel Broughton-5th Latin. En-
glish Grammar. and English History
Life of Gustavus Adolphus.
Ethel Johnson-English History.
Arithmetic, and Algebra-Life OF
Charles Mi.
James Observation-Disclosures, Alge-
bra, and Third English-Gueber's
Myths of Greece and Rome.
Lily Nelson-3rd French, 4th Latin
1st Arithmetic-Life OF Napoleon.
Susie U. Nottingham-3rd Latin
end French, End Algebra, End En-
glish-Johnson's Lives of the Poets.
Annie E. Fosque-2nd Latin, LIST
Algebra, 1st French-Life of Nelson
j. Harry Rew-3rd Latin, American
History, 2nd German-The Golden
Age of Athens.
Cecille Powell-2nd Latin, End Ger
man, Chemistry-The Old South
(Page)
Constance Taylor-3rd Latin, 1st
German, Geometry.
Rowland H. Latham-1st Latin, Isl
Greek, 1st German, 1st Mathnatics
American History-Bryant's Trans
latlon of Homer, Plumtre's Transla
ton of Sophocles.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1897-06-19
Fair Privileges.

The privileges of the Chesapeake
Agricultural Fair Association will be
let to the highest bidder, at public
auction, on the grounds, Thursday,
July LIST, at $50 o'clock, p. m, on the
arrival Of the mail train at Cape
Charles. Catalogues of fair can be
had by applying to the secretary,
Chesapeake, Va.
Peninsula enterprise. [volume] (Accomac, Va.) 1881-1965, 1897-06-19
Festivals.

There will be fair and festival at
Leemont, held by the members and
friends of the NJ. P. Church on July
3rd. Supper will be served.
Fourth of July celebrated on Sat
urd;.y, the Bird, both day and night,
on Parksley M e. Camp ground, by
Parksley and Crowson NJ. E. Epworth
Leagues. Fine confectioneries and
ice cream will be served.
Don't forget that the 3rd of July is
to be big day for Mappsburg. And
don't forget, either, that the drama
ut night is one of the very best-one
that will interest and delight both
old and young.
There will be an all day fair at
Sanford Nj. E. Church, South, on
saturday, July Ord. Dinner, supper
and refreshments will be served.
Proceeds for the benefit Of the
church. Public cordially invited.
There will be fair and festival at
Wisharts Point, Saturday, July 3rd
for benefit of Atlantic NJ. 2. Church.
Boat sailing, excursions, speaking,
dinner, supper, ice cream, confec-
tionary, sc. Come and have good
! time and help a good cause.
The guild of Emanuel Church will
give a free entertainment consisting
Of the Meeting of the Flowers and
the Flag drill, " at jenkins Bridge,
Saturday, July Ord, beginning at 2
o'clock. The public cordially in
vited. Supper and refreshments
served on the grounds.
A fair will be held at Harborton,
on the Sd Of July, under the auspices
of the NJ. e. Church, South. A brass
band has been engaged for the occa-
sion. Foot and tub races and other
athletic sports will be among the at
tractive features of the day, to be
followed at night by fireworks and a
comic lecture. Ice cream and other
refreshments will be serve d. The
public is invited ard expected.
All who wish to enjoy Saturday,
the 3rd of July, should spend that
day at Mappsburg. With baseball
and other games, public speaking by
one of Accomac's most gifted sons,
tournament and coronation addresses,
brass band, &C., not dull hour will
find place during the day. Dinner
aad supper served on the grounds.
At night that splendid drama, click
DRY Farm" will be played in Maps
burg Hall. Don't fail to see this
play. You will be amply rewarded
for money expended. General adj
mission, % cents; reserved seats, 81
cents: children, Is cents. Doors open
promptly at o'clock.
COMMITTEE.