davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
PainG'S Celery Compound Max

In March, April and May use Paine s
celery compound.
And only PINES celery compound! For
is natures remedy.
Do not for a moment confound it with
any of the ignorant, Catohpeony, short
livet patent remedies-sarsaparill ner-
vines and tODics that bear as much re-
semblance to Paine's celery compound as
the parasite vines do to the oaks that they
live on.
Paines celery compound cures disease
It makes people well. 1t has saved the
lives of thousands of sufferers. 1t makes
the weak strong.
1t purifes the blood and ennches the
nerves.
Every condition of winter life has been
detrimental to health. There has bcen a
steady decline in nervous vigor. Now that
spring comes the body is ready to cast off
unhealthy tissues if it is only given a
chance. This opportunity comes when the
eXcretory organs, kidneys, skin and bowels
are made to work actively and the nerves
are able to furnish sufficient energy to the
digestive organs.
No remedy in the world accomplishes
these results like Paine's celery compound.
1t nOurishes, regulates and invigorates the
entire nervous system from the brain to the
minutest nerve filament. 1t causes an IN
creased appetite and tones up the stomach
to deal with the increased food. It's nour-
ishlng action is Immediately manifest in q
clearing up of the muddy, unhealthy skin,
an increase in weight and more refreshing
sleep.
First discovered after laborious, scientific
research by the ablest physician America
has produced, Prof. Edward E. Phelps,
MD LID, Of Dartmouth college, it is
prescribed and publicly indorsed by the
best practitioners in every city of America.
1t has been so enthusiastically recon-
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

mended by grateful men and women in
every walk of life that it is to-day in every
sense, the most popular remedy the world
ever knew.
1t has proven itself The greatest of all
spring medicines.
In New York. Chicago, Philadeph
Boston, st. Louis and two or three other
large cities, the leading newspapers making
their own canvasses again this year, have
found that the demand for Paine's celery
compound surDasses that of all other reme-
dies togetherl
Paine's celery compound, taken during
the early spring days, has even more than
, it's usual remarkable efficacy in making
people we'll. 1t makes short work of disease.
1t rapidly drives out neuralgia, sleeple>s
ness, dyspepsia and rheumatism from the
system. 1t removes that lassitude, or
"tired feeling" which betokens weakened
nerves and poor bloc d.
Women working in close offices, sales
women tired out and nervous from long
hours standing on their feet and waiting
on impatient, irritating customers; over
worked, worried and disheartened men
and women Of everywhere will be aston
ished to find how much happier life be-
comes when their nerves have been strength
ened and their blood purified by means Of
this great remedy.
No other remedy has the hearty approval
of a like body of educated men and women
and professional men, nor has there ever
been a remedy that was welcomed in so
many intelligent, prudent homes where
pains is taken to get only the best in 50
vital matter. In such families all over
the country Paines celery compound is the
first, last and only remedy used.
Prof. Phelps had studied the nerves in
health and disease, when we'll nourished
and when ufsder-nourished, in men and
women and children years before he looked
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

for the remedy. Paine's celery compound
is the outcome of his entire professional
life. 1t is the one remedy that the world
could not lose to-day at any price.
Paine's celery compound induces the
body to take on solid flesh.
Physicians recognize Paine's celery COM
pound as the one scientific spring remedy,
and it is universally prescribed by them
wherever there is great need OF vigorous
and prompt restoring of health and strength
to the worn out system.
Paine's celery compound is the best
spring remedy because it is more than
healthy app tite, complete digestion, regu-
lar action of the bowels and the other ex
cretory organs whenever taken, whether in
summer or in winter, hut as the greatest of
spring remedies it has extraordinary op.
portuuities for inducing the body to throw
off morbid humors that poison it and cause
rheumatism, neuralgia, heart trouble and
the system is more pliable and chronic dis
eases so securely lodged in the system that
they are with difficulty ousted become
more ira table.
Thou ands of men and women have
found from personal e5 perience that Paine's
celery compound makes people well, and
keeps all from sickness VINO take it in the
spring.
Many a father and mother have noticed
the unmistakable impr vement in the
he nth of their children from taking Paines
celery compound in the spring. II is the
one scientifically accurate remedy fitted by
its composition to thoroughly purify the
blood and dispel that exhausted feeling and
get rid of skin disea es, head .ches, and fits
of depre ssion with which children with
weak, nervous systems, as well as grown
people, are afflicted
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
How the Day Was Won

"Sire,' quoth the chief of staff, 1.-The
Amazons are assembling on the right
wing and evidently intend to turn our
left with vigorous charge"
do you mean the Amazonian wheel
corps?'
Eyes, sire; and they are a gallant
sight. Their wheels have all been re-
nickeled and they have donned theiI
new ashes of roses boomers for the
first time. What shall we do to avert
the danger!'
"Order out the royal sprinkling
carts"
"Yes, sire"
"Let them make the battle ground in
front of our left wing as muddy as
possible.
Eyes, sire"
"Just as soon as the charging Anna
IONS in their new silk boomers strike
that mud they will whirl about and
ride back as fast as they can pedal"
For what, sire?'
For their mud guards. stupid. Then
If we advance rapidly enough to sur
prise them before they can get thell
helmets on straight, the day is ours"
And it was even so.-Cleveland PlaiI
Dealer.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
TOO MUCH BARK.

1t is not the best watchdog that barks the
most. The old watchdog lays low and
seizes the burglar before he knows it. In
the treatment of rheumatism many suffer
ers talk too much and do too little. II
they want to find out what is best for it, lei
them get st. Jacobs Oil and use il. 1t is
a good watchdog against the intrusion OF
pain. 1t goes to work quickly and surely,
and seizes hold of rheumatism for the pu..
pose OF driving it out. ami holds on until
its purpose is accomplished. 1t is, there
fore, the best remedy. because it takes the
best means to accom- plish its end, as many
who have suffered for years with the all
ment will testify. The cure is the same
in chronic or mhammatOry cases. With
patience and free use OF it, the worst cases
of long standing have been finally cured
hx- ~
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Where Lincoln Was Born.

Efforts are being made to sell to the
government for $50, 600 the farm Of 112
acres near HodgensyiIle, KY, on which
Abraham Lincoln was born. The pres
ent owner Of the property is a citizen Of
New York, who bought it not many
years ago for So, coo. The little one
room log cabin which for time served
as Thomas Lincoln's home stands today
practically as it was in 1909, but it con-
tains no furniture or other relics dating
anywhere near back to that year
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
AmnIe Protection.

The New Mexico council has passed
a law requiring every sleeping Car pass
ing through the territory to carry safes
for the protection Of the passengers val
uables, and Mr.. Pullman responds by
threatening to lock the doors of all his
cars when they are passing through the
territory. Between the two powers the
passengers ought to be well protected
from all robbers except the porter. -
Charleston News and Courier
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
OYER TIE PRECIPICE

Hosts OF invalids tumble to destruction
simply because they will exercise no dis
cretion in the matters of eating, drinking and
the avoidance of exciting causes and, atoye
all in the item of medication. They persist
in dosing themselves in season and out OF
season with drastic and violent remedies,
opiates and mineral pOisons. The BEST the
safest the pleasantest substitute for such
hurtful no-remedies is Hostetter's stomach
Bitters, potent for malaIial. rheumatic, dys-
peptic, nervous and bilious complaints
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Two Obstacles.

One of Congressman sideways con-
Etituents in New Hampshire wrote him
the other day about a pension bill Mr..
Sulloway replied:
"Only two obstacles stand in the way
Of passing your bill-Jehovah and Tom
Reed. 1 think can manage Jehovah if
you will look after Reed.
Mr.. Sulloway has not yet received
reply to his letter. Washington Post.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Gold standard For Japan.

The japanese government has decided.
to adopt the gold money standard. The
mint ratio between gold and silver has
been fixed at 3215 to 1. The silver yen,
or dollar, will be withdrawn gradually
from circulation, and the smallest gold
piece will be of the value of yen. The
new standard will go into operation
next October.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

1uOGldS JcllSTSOu vas lu0 uTSG pT6Sl-
dent inaugurated at Washington. For
four months previous he had presided
over the senate, during the second ses-
sion of the Sixth congress, the first to
meet in Washington, lodging at Con
RAIDS boarding house, within stone S
throw of the capitol. The north wing
had then been so far completed as to be
occupied by the senate, and the house
met in a temporary brick building in
the south wing, called at the time the
oven.
The senate met at 10 O'Clock, Senator
Hillhouse of Connecticut presiding. a
quiet, dignifed little man advanced to
the desk and was received by the vice
president, who administered the oath of
office Aaron Burr repeated it after him
and took his seat in the chair as vice
president There was no formality. The
onlooker would not have been aware Of
any change except tnat the two men
had changed places.
A little later President Jefferson left
his lodgings on foot in his ordinary
dress, his appearance being very much
like that Of tall, raw boned farmer,
and walked across the square to the
capitol. He was accompanied only by
Secretaries Dexter and Stoddart of John
Adams cabinet and several members Of
the house. President Adams had fed
from the city, leaving only the secre-
taries Of the treasury and navy to turn
over the government to his successor.
Into the north wing the new presi-
dent walked with his little company Of
friends. Vice President Burr arose and
greeted him, seating him in the center
chair on the platform, Chief Justice
Marshall occupying that at Jeffer-
sons left and Burr that at his
right After short pause, to let the
small audience quiet down, Jefferson
rose and read his inaugural. When he
had finished, he turned to Marshall,
who administered the oath. The cere-
mony was over.
Jefferson then returned to Conrad's
boarding house, where he was congratu
lated by few foreign agents in Wash
ingtOn and his friends.
John Davis, an Englishman, publish
ed lying book of American travel i'll
1903, in which he asserted that he saw
Jefferson ride on horseback to the capi-
tol, hitch his horse to the palings and
60 in and take the oath. Davis was not
in this country at the time, and, though
the story is untrue, it will live Charge
d'Affaires Thornton wrote to Lord
Grenville that Jefferson was escorted
by body of militia artillery" i'll his
walk across the square, but this was
an error caused by visit of platoon
of Virginia militia to the city. The in
auguration was Of the simplest kind,
yet full of dignity.
Personal expenses Of Thomas jefferson
his inauguration as president..... None
Cost to government. Observation-Disclosures. None
Expenses of coaching and stage parties
to the national capital and entertain
ments there ........................ 5000
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Their Reflections.

Mrs. Gray-Mr. Soule is going to
preach tomorrow. l wouldn't miss
hearing him for anything"
Mrs. Greene-I'm aWfully sorry
shan't be able to CO."
Mrs. Gray (after saying good-by)-
No wonder she doesn't want to be seen
in that shabby old cape again.
Mrs. Greene-Got a new bonnet or
something, l suppose.-Boston Tran
script.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
OF C0IIr5e.

"a horse is no good any more" de-
clared the bicycle dealer; ride him an
hour and he's tired"
"Yes, but one of your burned ma
chimes Is allus tired before you start TO
ride it," replied the farmer, who was
just looking around.-Detroit Free
Press
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward for
any case of Catarrh that can not be cured by
Halls CatarTh Cure.
F. J. CHENEY e CO., Props, Toledo, o.
We, the undersigned, have known F. J. Cheney
1or the last 10 years, and believe him perfectly
honorable in all business transactions and fin
ancially able to carry out any obligations made
by their firm.
WEsT & TRUAx, Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, o.
WALDING, KINNAN Il MARVIN, Wholesale Drug
gists, Toledo, Ohio.
Hali's Catarrh Cure is taken internally, acting
directly upon the blood and mucous surfaces OF
the system. Price 75c. per bottle.
Sold by all Druggists. Testimonials free.
Halls Family Pills are the best.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
The Road to Wealth.

A gentleman saw the following ad-
yertisement in a paper: ''The road to
wealth. Send twelve stamps to -"
The gentleman sent twelve stamps, and
in return for his outlay received minute
instructions how to get to the Bank Of
England from any part Of London
Tit-Bits.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
No Fixed Rule.

You cawn't set down no fixed rule o.
conduct in this life," said old Virgins,
the Barley Now orator. Samson got
into trouble cause he got is hair cut,
and Absalom got into trouble cause be
didn't t"-Tid-B Bits
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Modern improvements.

House Hunter-Seems to me this
house isn't very well built. The floor
shakes when we walk.
Agent-Um-yes;t that's the new kind
of spring floor for dancing, you know.
House Hunter-And those stairs
creak terribly.
Agent-Y-e-s; we furnish this new
patent burglar alarm staircase without
extra charge.-Boston Traveller.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
The Only Drawback.

Vlsitor-There is panel in my new
dining room that that would just fit.
Hungry Artist-Most happy, I'm sure
Visitor-Only, when the room is paid
for, shall have no money for pictures.
-Harper's Bazaar.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

Chambermaid crushing in)-Please,
mum, the cooks fell down the cellar
and broke her arm!
Lady Of the house (quickly)-Ill have
1t taken out of her wages.-New York
Journal.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
The Brute.

Shells my hat on straight, dear!
He-I don't see how In the nature OF
things it can be.
She-And why, pray?
He-Because your head isD't.-Bos ton
Courier.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

The Rev. DR.. r. R. Swope of ST.
Matthew's P. E. church of Wheeling
has received al invitation to accept a
call as rector of All Souls church, Bilt-
more. N. c., on the Vanderbilt estate.
DR.. Swope has not decided to accept
With Mrs. Swope, he is preparing to
visit Biltmoreand look over the field
There are hundreds Of employees ON the
estate
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Did Him a Favor.

Pedestrian Ito footpad)-MOney or my
life. is it? l was wondering how l was
going to live through this week. Now
l won't have to. Very kind Of you.
Shoot away.-Boston Transcript.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
1t Depends.

"Do you Think" said the young man
who had gone into politics, that man
in my position can afford to be indiffer-
ent to public opinion?
81 don't know" said Senator Sor-
ghum, thoughtfully. "How much IS
your private Washington
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Awfully Slow!

He-Darling, l have loved you ever
since first we met.
She-Well, why didn't you say so
long ago? Did you think l was mind
reader?-Cleveland Leader.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
HOME PRODUCTS AND PURE FOOD.

All Eastern Syrup, so-called, usually very
light eolored and of heavy body, Is made from
glucose. 'f Tea Garden DTips'' is made from
Sugar Cane and is strictly pure. Itis for sale by
frst-class grOeers in cans only. Manufactured
by the PACIFIC COAST SYRUP co. All genuine
'' Tea Garden DTfps" have the manufacturers
name Autographed on every can.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
ReDaratiOu.

John Butts, SRI want to leave my
property to my two sons-one tenth to
my youngest son, John Butts, and nine
tenths to my eldest son, Royal Chester
field Chauncey de Peyster Butts.
Family Lawyer-H'm! Do you think
that's quite fair?
John Butts, Sr.-Yes; want to make
some kind Of reparation to Royal for
allowing his mother to give him such a
crackjaw name.-Tit-Bits.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
A Cru sty Opinion,

"Uncle Theophilus, what is a grass
widow?"
"Well, she's a widow whose husband
didn't have to die to get rid of her,
Detroit Free Press
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Plain and Blunt.

"I'm a plain, blunt man, Margarete,
and can frame no honeyed speeches.
Will you marry me?"
Pm little on the plain, blunt order,
myself. NOp'-DetrOit Free Press.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

Nurse Girl lost track of the child.
mum, and"
Mistress-Good gracious! Why didn't
you speak to a policeman?
Nurse Girl wuz speaking to wan
all the tonne, mum.-London Pearson's
Weekly.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Hard on Hubby.

An exchange announces, on the death
of a lady, that 'ishe lived fifty years
with her husband and died in confident
hope of better life."-Texas Sitter.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

All ailments arising from disordered stom-
ach, torpid liver and constipated bowels are
quickly cured by using Lash's Kidney and
Liver Bitters.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Ouite Prenared.

Doctor (sympathetically)-I trust you
are prepared for the worst.
Weeping Wife-Quite. l had some
lovely mourning bargains last week at
Crepe & Wede's selling off.-Illustrated
Bits.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Information.

Young man." said a wealthy city
man to his spendthrift nephew, 81 laid
the first foundation Of my fortune by
saving cab-fares."
Il didn't know you ever drove one,
uncle" remarked the youth.-TidB Bits.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

We will forfeit 81 coo if any of our pub
lished testimonials are proven to be not
genuine. The PIso Co., Warren, Pa
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

81 never could understand how people have
the nerve to marry aga n after being divorced
"Oh, it merely shows how sure they are that the
other party was to blame"
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
HUMOR OF THE WEEK
STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.

Odd, Curious and Laughable Phases
of Human Nature Graphically Por-
trayed by Eminent Word Artists Of
Our own Day-A Budget of Fun.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

Lash's Kidney and Liver Bitters searches out
all impurities and eXpels them harmlessly
through the natural channels from the system.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

Another-Really? 1t was good
thing that you did not teach him before
you were married. -Tid-Bits.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
The Piano Salesman.

Mrs. Rockets Gnterestedly)-Have
you taken the young gentleman TO
board whom l see around your house
SO much lately?
Mrs. Vanwart (wearily)-No; he is
merely trying to sell us piano.-New W
York Journal.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
A Good Thing.

One Matron-Since I have been mar
ried l have taught my husband good
taste.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
HOW'S THIS &?

To thoroughly eradicate the taint or heredit-
airy disease from the system use Lash's Kidney
and Liver Bitters.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Courier.

Nora-Oh, guess what? George prom
ised to buy bicycle built for two.
Coral presume he meant two dol.
lars.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

Boat officIal-To put out that electric
light turn it off the same as you would
gas.
Pat-Av coorse! Ofm no granehorn;
but yez mey lave me few matches in
case OF wants t. loight it agin.-St.
Louis Post-Dispatch.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
1TaIarIa aud GriD positiyely cured: als(

ell other Medical and5urgicaI eases guaranteed
s cure or no charge. Reasonable terms; call OF
write; confidential DIR. CRAIG & CO., Medi-
cal Institute, 1916 Market ST., San Francisco, Cal
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
TWO INAUGURATIONS
M,KINLEY'S COST ABOUT $3.50 900.
JEFFERSON's ABOUT $1,000.

These sums Include Cost to sightseers at
Both Ceremonies--A Historical Contrast
Between tie Incoming of the First Pres
ident of the Century and the Last.
This is d conservative estimate of the
cost of the Mckinley inauguration to
the president elect personally, to the
citizens of the District Of Columbia, to
the visitors and to the government;
Mr.. McKinley's special train from
Canton ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. S1,oUV
Mr. and Mrs. McKinley's hotel ex-
penses at Washington ................ 300
Mrs. McKinley's ball gown............ 500
Mrs. McKinley's inauguration cos
tune e.......,................,. 200
Six evening gowns at $3.50 each. h....... 1850
Mr.. McKinley's inauguration outfit. 800
Total personal expenses ............ s4,sOO
Cost of ceremonies at the capitol, erec-
tion of platforms, decorations, etc..
at public expense. e..................... s.,
Cost to government in salaries of pen
sion officials and clerks temporarily
idle, though under pay, during use
of pension building for festivities. : 10000
Estimated cost in loss of services, re-
transfer of records, tracing or re-
placing lost records .............,,,. 1900
Total cost to government through this
interruption ......................... $4,000
Expenses of citizens Of the District OF
Columbia on account Of ball, music,
printing, etc. guaranteed and raised
by subscriptions .6..,,............. $50
Cost to private parties for erection Of
reviewing stands 5000, less $4,3 300
paid for privileges by SPECTATORS. 6,700
Estimated amount paid by private
parties for seats at Inauguration
ceremonies, parades, etc ........,... $1,000
Cost Of transportation to visitors from
out of town ESTIMATED by railroad
officials-Pennsylvania railroad, 60-
600; Baltimore and Ohio railroad,
10000; Chesapeake and Ohio rail-
road, 10000; Southern railroad, TO-
0O0; total number Of visitors, 100000
at an average per capita transporta
tion cost of $l0). Observation-Disclosures. 1,4OO, 900
Cost Of lodging and meals to visitors
at So each .......................... $4,000
Cost of tickets to inaugural ball ..... $4,000
Six thousand suppers wine, ETC.,
erage of So ................. 1900
Flowers ........ NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.. 5000
Public carriages at So per call. ........ 20, coo
Total expenses of visitors. So 407, 600
Grand total So $50, 500
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
At Last.

Jack-Hurrah, Mamie! We can get
married now. Union stock is going up
Iilya liOhtOinO
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

TenderfOot-Is Slippery Sam hanging
around here nowadays?
Alkah Abe-Naw. He was but the
Mayor had him cut down yist'day maw-
nin'.-New York Journal.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Noah's Claim to wisd ON.

Teacher-Who was the wisest man?
Tommy-NOah.
"Noah?"
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Poor Boy,

Rev. DR.. Choker-Ah, what a sweet
little girl, and what a pretty dress she
has! VIII the little pet tell the minister
her name?
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

"Yes'm. He was the only man who
ed."-Indianapolis Journal.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
Reason to Like Har

Preacher-HoW do you Ike your new
mamma, Johnnie?
Johnnie-Oh, purity good. l ct Jar
of plums yistaday and she blamed 1t on
the hired girl.-Cleveland Leader.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
An Exciting Game,

Mamma-Oh, Billy! Don't you know
it is cOwardly to strike your little
brother?
Billy Qndignantly)-I'm not acting
like coward. I'm pretending I'm his
papa, and I'm Furnishing him.-Har-
pers Bazaar.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01
MEDICAL.

"a LPEAu1S French Pills; boon to ladies
- troubled with Irregularities; no danger;
safe: sure; 81 80 express. G. o. D.; don't delay
until too late. OSGOOD BROTHERS, Oakland.
DR.. RECORDS restorative Pills, the great nerve
tonic and specific for exhausted vitality; phys
icaI debilIGy. wasted forces. etc; approved by
G. STEELE, 635 Mar4tt St, Palace Hotel. S F.
Irce OK of so, ST %; 100, 81; of 20o, 50 so; OF
400, Sc; preparatory pills, s.. Send for circular.
The Winslow mail., 1897-05-01

Mamie-Oh, Jack! And have you
some?
Jack-No; but our father has."-New
York World.