The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1897-02-05
HE STOLE A MARCH.
end Afterward Had Plenty of Time to
Repent at Leisure.

Repent at Leisure.
When I was running the GeeviIle Beacon
Light of Liberty, one of my patrons from
n way back district came into the office
one day late in the fall. Joy was beaming
from his face like a candle shining through
the holes in a jack lantern.
s.Tol dc rol, de rol, de raddiGyl To1 de
rol, de rol, de ray ~ was his first remark
as he cut a series of backwoods pigeon
wings around the room. 1t was court
week, during which event the Geeville tav-
erns were wont to set forth to their eager
patrons a tipple that had won much fame
for the proInptness with which it took dull
care by the neck and tossed it out of the
window, and I at first thought that my
friend from way back had been in fond
and too protracted dalliance with the in
sinuating bowl, but such was not the fact.
After he had warbled and pirouetted off
his first burst-of glee he plunked down in
a chair and said:
m goin ter give yer a piece fer yer
paper better'n boss stealth, or runnin off
with somebody else's wife, or burnin yer
neighbours barnI Ye know the Wilder
Buggles, an ye know the Wilder Buggles'
place, don't yep
told him did.
''How cid dye s'pose the wilder is?'' he
asked, and told him had no idea.
why, dod durn it, she's 6S-68 pastl
An amt she hunly? She's so all fired
hum1y that she sot in her corn patch this
season an actu'ly skeered the crows away!
That's poorly durn huInly, amt it? An
amt she thin? An ash saplin's got more
meat on it than the wilder has Factl
She's deefer'n a post, too, an her off eye is
out, an you couldn't raise white beans on
that clearin of her'n! For agricultural pur-
poses that clearin amt with shi1l'n an
acre. But, do We know, she won't sell the
durn place for any price. She says if any
Teller wants that clearin he's got to take
her with it! An who dye thinks ben
edgin round the wilder, anxious to git the
clearin on them diskerigin terms? Actu'-
ly willin to marry the Wilder Buggles to
git that clearin? Why, Pete Sykes! An
why is he SO durn willin to git the clearin
on them diskerigin terms? Cause he's
found out that the clearin has got this yere
on it, that's why
My friend from way back took hand
full of glittering, heavy bits Of ore from his
pocket and handed them to me. Then he
danced joyously again, shouting:
''Gold, by thumps-gold! TOT de ro1,
de rol, de raddidy! Gold on the Wilder
Buggles' clearinl She's old an rattly as a
dried gourd def an short an off eye, an
her clearin amt with shill' n an acre for
asricultur', but there's gold on her c1earin
tons an tons of It! An Pete Sykes, he's
found it out somehow an is willin to
marry the wiClderl He told me sol But
he don t know tina. the widder's dead sot
On mel Pete's go1n up to ask her tonight
Tol, de ro1, de rol, de raddidyl An the
wilder don't know she's got gold on her
clearin! She's dead sot on me- an Pete
can't fetch her! She's old enough to be
my NANNY, but she's got goldl Say,
amt this goin to be piece fer your paper
that'n make things rattle?'
I took the specimens my way back
friend handed me. They were iron pyrites.
put them on shovel and held it in the
Gre Presently they vanished as if they
had never been. The look ON my visitor s
face was sight to see.
That's what they call FOOLS gold, Jag
gers I said Its entirely worthless.
You couldn't get dollar for a thousand
tons of it. You've had q narrow escape.
You might have married the decrepit
Widow Bugglos and her worthless clearing
Let Pete Sykes have the widow if he wants
her."
situation. He stamped and thumped and
knocked things around the Office and yelled
and swore until things looked blue.
Let Pete have the widder?p he yelled.
'fWhy, great craclzin heels of Julius Cae-
sar's ghostl There ain t nc widderl The
Widder Buggles, old an rattly an def az
without off eye, amt the Widder Bug
glesl She's Mrs. Elnathan Jaggers, by
thumps, fer I stole a march on Pete an
married her this norninl''
And my friend from way back dashed
out of the office and away. I never put
his piece in the Paper.-Ed Mott in New
York journal.