The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1897-02-11
CHANGE IN GHOST STORIES.

CHANGE IN GHOST STORIES.
He had been dead for matter Of 112
years, so naturally the place looked
strange to him.
What he now saw had never been
part Of his physical existence, and lie
wondered If it were not best for him to
60 back to the graveyard and have a
conference with some fresh corpses who
would know all about those things
which has thus early filled him with
doubts and misgivihgs. From the new
ly dead one he could obtain information
which might keep him out of trouble.
But, as he calculated upon it, such
action, 1t seemed to him, would make
him laughing stock for all the fool
ghosts in the neighborhood. They
would deride him as jay ghost who
did not know enough about the haunt
ing business to set at it withoutn guide
book or time card or letter of aH-
vice and credit. They would gather
around and hoot and jeer and shame
him half to life, for they couldn' shame
him half to death, he having been dead
for good 112 years.
II wish," he said to himself, that /
had exerted myself a little to keep
abreast Of the times. Here find myself
with my entire death wasted. just
Laying around in comfortable grave
in the daytime and spending the night
time in disputing with a lot of cid fos-
silized sixteenth century ghosts con-
ceuning things of NO interest whatever,
have allowed opportunities to pass
and q lot Of juniors who weren't even
born, much less dead, when l died. have
pushed me aside and am just a piece
Of old furniture. If we're thousand
years old or something like that it would
be better, for could lie and swear and
slash around retailing stale yarns, like
King Arthur or Caesar or Ahab or one of
that lot, and be interesting. But ! don't
know anything about the remote past
or the adjacent present. have fooled
away my chances, but I am going to
! remedy conditions. I am going to go
; haunting around this town and get up
reputation and go back to them and
assume my proper position in spiritual
society. Why, just think Of It! Dead
112 years and have never scared any
one yeti Never screeched at q school
boy in lonesome wood OF groaned
around In deserted house, or any
thing"
You could see that he was ashamed
of himself and that he was determined
! to rectify his errors of omission. To be
sure, he was q. bit nervous and dubious
about it-although, perhaps it isn't cor
rect to use that first adjective in descrip-
tion Of ghost, inasmuch as his nervous
system is generally supposed to be COM
| pressed air or fog or something of that
kind. He felt that it was pretty serious
undertaking for a strange and passe
ghost to drift into strange town with
the avowed purpose of haunting it into
a state of terror, but he was an insistent
old spook, and buckled down to bust
ness with determination.
"As have always understood it," he
remarked to himself, "the thing ought
to begin with demonstration In the
matter of blowing out lights. Iremem-
Der when was alive that they used to
talk of ghosts sneaking up behind one
and blowing out the lamp, and it al
ways filed me with horror. It's good
trick. wonder who invented it? /
hellol If here isn't chance just ready
for me, I'm a tombstone!"
The city was dark, it being after mid
night, and all was very still. Suddenly,
however, as he turned corner he
slammed square up against window,
out through which q faint light
streaked its way. At desk sat man,
DOING over book. 1t was a beautiful
chance. The ghost quietly slipped in
side.
"There is going to be festival OF
fear right here in about four seconds, u
he murmured softly to himself.
"Oh. guess not" he thought. "Jnst
imagine how he will feel, how his hair
win raise, how his flesh will crawl W hen
lean over his shoulder and blow that
light out! Why, it almost scares me
myself"
He leaned over and blew.
The light continued to burn steadily
The ghost had Strengthened up ready
to give vent to wild, demoniac laugh
as IL the custom, he believed, for sucl
cases made and provided, but he did not
laugh. There was nothing to laugh at
The man continued to read on undis
turbed In his dozing fashion.
"That's funny" the visitor said tc
himself. Haven't got any lungs any
more or any strength Of breaths Well