Spirit of the age. [volume] (Woodstock, Vt.) 1845-1913, 1897-01-30
THE RETIRED BURGLAR.
An Experience lat Wa. Very Curious
and Az Highly Eyaspcrating.

on remember ! thlt YOU me
other day" s"iI thereto" hIrglnr
"ahout urS"rtng tt cDL. OF buck
cts of past" IN rnpn th-r W.T. be-
ing paprrcU AMI Iaiim ;do"n i 'he
paste ami getting uli ',"pNei Win
it and then sitting du,,n iii corner
seat IN The il,.t room 81 '.Tip' the
paste oil ny shoes un ,ilnJlin4 when
I GOT w that | hi .D!l cushions
sU"l to IL" al over: Well, that
muko- M ;hink uf %uD-hcr sticky
experience | h one thlt " -
somewhat ii't"r nj no u thlt
"Nuu II lpJli over . ! .rHlu
and ,llroual -, itrelu drawers i'll
IL room when you can, Nou0rc pref
ty suro to lin1 something about
bureau wonGh carrying off, but you
don't ulWdy-. | D., mE lump down
one night on toe ot Il bureau after
Il preliminary ,rEcy o,Hr it with
ont finding anything and then went
tbror@h tn tUl drawer without
finding anything there and 5hcn |
stepped back Il lj'Tlo IL get at the
next drawer ".-,icl o. r:.tl!rr | was
going Ca -rl. back, Int coat hit. |
was stuck fast. standing there in
front of the NirrA, lcauHn tmove
my feet any inH2e'n if t.r"E'd been
strapped down to thel:""r wlth iron
straps.
"Cuurse my hands were free, and
l picked up my lamp and turned it
down on the floor. found on he
floor il front of the |urelu Il board
about I feet long nnd maybe i on
90 inchr, wide. thai wa, Stunning
on Ii wa. screwed down tot he tinOr
at the four con trr' AMI it WIS Gov
cred all over thick with the HtjrkirS't
stuff | ever came across. What it
wa.; l don't know, bat the ,tickir+t
glue that ever was would have bren
like mild ,lilutiOn Oi weak mlici,
lage compared to it. | juat simply
coul,ln' mDvr my feet ut all. And
unfortunately. for some reason,
hadn t worn my rubherS that night.
1t was NY shoes that W.,' stuck
down, and I'd got to get out of en-.
OF course could have unacrewed
the board from the floor [ had Il
scrcwtrivrr right there in my bag
alongside Of me--but what good
would that have done! Id have had
to take the board along with me,
and, hopping along WITH Il board 1
feet long and ] = feet wide fastened
to my feet, I'll have made as much
noise as dropping boards in Il llm-
Der yard. There WASH t anything to
do but get out of my shoes, and
bent over en- carefully and unlncod
'em and then held ON to the bureau
and stepped out III 'em, one ut IL
time, on to the floor. You know, 1
hated to leave them shoes there like
that, but thclc Walsh t anything else
to do. lunl,cl ut EN- mimic and
then dropped my lamp in my ulster
pocket and picked NJ my laG--that
is, l tried to picl; ii up. hut might
Just as we'll have tried to lift the
house. realized then for the first
time that | had set the bag down on
the sticky board, and it was stuck
as tight rs my shoes were.
We'll, that mad" ne kind of mad.
Id carried the OH bag for years
and got used to it, and l hated to
lose it, especially like thut But
what could do about it! Nothing.
And then | almost fell over on the
board myself when Preached for the
bag and il didn' come, and | kind
of felt tnnt it WASH t sensible to fool
around here too long. There wash t
unyhuGy awake, and I wa; just as
free TO move HEUut a., ever, but |
colll;iH t helptliin!>ing that anybody
that would invent scheme like
that might have something else ON
foot anyN here around the house so
| orrnel the bag and got the things
out OF ii and dropped 'em in my
pocket. and then | took one more
look at my SHOES and the bag stand
ing there in II $or, of irregular row
in front ui The bureau. and then |
left 'pm aud made bee lin" ont Of
the houIr, carefully avoiding. ~ far
as could. contact with anything ON
the way. New York sun.