The Wilmington daily Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1890-1902, 1897-06-30
BURDETTE AND THE BICYCLE.
He Says He Ride. but Not That He
Does.

A report got In circulation to the effec,
that Bob Burdotte was dead. The Burling
ton with "Hawkeye," which the humorist
was formerly associated, denied the rumol
and Bob confirms the denial in the fol
lowing letter to the editor:
| BRYN MAwR, PA, June IA, lS97.-"My
Dear Waite: Like the true friend and
4 loyal comrade you ever were, you do right
to protest against my burial prior to the
autopsy.
| II am, indeed, very much alive. Not
| only SO, haven't been dead even Il little
bit. Not once. Could have been, he'd /
wanted to be. Could be yet But don t
| want. May be ought to be, eve now.
| But, as we make weekly confessio 1--WE
have left undono those things which we
ought to have done"
Possibly the rumOr that / have gone
dead grew out of the fact that / have
learned to ride bicycle / say, have
learned Not am learning Learned in
one lesson. All by myself.
went out in the moonlight last Friday
night to learn, having first locked my
family in the house, and forbade them to
look out of the windows.
Led my bicycie out on the turnpike-the
Brin Mayr pixies are broader than the way
TO destruction, twice as smo 9th and much
cleaner. It's young bicycle-a colt,
foaled in 97. Would give the name but
for the fact that l had to pay for the
wheel. Will only say, therefore, in ac.
cOrdance with the ethics Of our profession,
that it is NOT the wheel anybody says it
Is.
Il held him by the withers right in tho
middle of the road, and mounted without
assistance.
Il dlsmounted in the same independent
manner
Got on again and proceeded to break
him to saddle.
Did ride the first time?
"Well. say
"Peoplc had told me-liars of all ages
and both sexcs-that / couldn't fall if, |
when felt that was falling, I would |
stick out my foot.
Il stuck out both feet and both hands
and fell on my head.
~ fell on one side of that dlabolical |
wheel and then on the other ! fell on both
sides at once; fell on top OF it and under
meath it, and mado 'dog-fa with it. l
fell between the wheels. i foil behind the
hind wheel and before the front one at the
same time and don't know yet how did
it. fell and thrust both legs lhrough the
spokes of one wheel. lmet terrified man
in buggy and drove him clear off the
pike through Wheelers hedge and don't
think he has come back yet.
Every time l fell slapped the palms of
my raw swollen throbblng hands on the
hard 1nelasGic pike, except the time | fell
on my head, / fell harder and with great.
or variety Of landing than any man could
fall unless he dropped out of balioonand
lit in lead of furniture l lost my con-
fldenCe, my patience, my temper, my {
clamps, lamp, bell and reputation. I
broke one pedal, the saddle, and the ordi. t
nance against loud, boisterous and abusive
language at night. t
ran Into everything In sight except the .
middle Of the road. sat down on every.
thing in the township except the saddle E
l scorched in cirorit not fifteen feet in |
circumference until you could smell
birthstone. made more revolutions than |
Il South American republic, and didn't @
get ten feet away from where started. !
haven't been go mauled and abraded, SO I
and beaten, so trampled upon l
and pounded, SO bruised and scratched |
Since left the army But can ride. d
Il don't say that do But lean. /
. "Do consider hiking good for the '
healthP
For the health of some people l do. y
don't sec how physician can bring up his
family unless his children have something Z
10 eat. 8
But in my own case, reserve my de.
cision. will wait until know whether n
am going to dle.or get we'll And do you
tell Brother Davis to keep his obituary ON r
lho standing galley until he hears from b
Slug Nine.T fdon't believe I've got 80' s
yet. Although friends who have called to II
zee me break down when they say good. t
oye' and walk out Of the room on tip. toe.
But wouldn't mind that if knew what
became of my shoulder blades the time l
an under the hay wagon. Cheerfully
'ours. ROBERT ], BuRDETTE."