The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1897-08-18

sssA SS&a-~-.
Heller hair is like sunsElne! She
Ye-es; It's brighter some - Tvs than
Others.-Puck.
she-I can sympathize with you.
was married once myself. He-But you
weren't married to q woman.-Tid-
Bits.
She Coming up suddenly)-Where
did that wave go? He coughing and
strangling)-I swallowed it.-Dublin
| World.
Melicent-Aren't bicycle lamps an
noying? Miriam (veXatiously)-1es;
mine goes out every time I run into
anybody-Puck.
Dora-He said there was one thing
about me he didn't like. Cora-What
was that? Dora-Another mans arm.
Detroit Free Press.
Nevada Justice (solemnly)-1 now
pronounce you husband and wife
shake hands-take your corners-and
may the best man win!-Puck.
"Now, they speak of her as an up-to-
date girl. What do you understand by
that?' 'My boy, girl that is up to
date is up to anything."-Puck.
Flint see where Boston is going to
spend over 100000 on those pneu-
matte tubes. Flam-That's lot OF
money to blow in-Boston Post.
:The world owes every man a lly-
ing" "Yes, and we don't get 1t col
lected until we have almost learned to
do without it."-Chicago Record.
"Would you consider it proper to pre-
cede the father Of your sweetheart
down stairs?" cit may be proper, but
it isn't always safe."-Yale Record.
$50, Dorothy is not going to marry
Mr.. Scrymser?" "No; she kept talking
to him about books he hadn't read, and
he got irritated and broke the engage
ment."-Puck.
The Eootpad-Only a dollar and a
quarter? Come, where's the rest of yer
money!? Mr.. Isaacs-Mein frendt, it's
in real esdate undt it's in my vife's
name-Puck.
"There are six necessities, you know,
for a happy marriage" "What are
they? ''First, a good husband" "And
the othersT' ''The other five are mon
ey."-La Caricature.
"Do you think, Harry, you could in
duce one or two boys to come to Sun
day school?" II could bring onc,' he
replied; "de udder fellers in our alley
kin lick me."-Dublin World.
GLOW is it that Wilson comes to thu
| club every night now? 1t used to b.
that we couldn't get him here once
month" ooh, he married last fall an(
settled down."-Detroit Free Press.
"Theaters ought to be seated Will
the women all on one side, and the mel
!. on the other" "Why?" $50 that whel
men 90 out between the acts they cal
tramp on each others toes.'-Detroi
!. Free Press.
WiggsLThe doctor told Browns wifi
to give him whisky If he had anothe
attack Of the fever and ague. Wages
Has he had a relapse? Wiggs-Wel
he's been shaking for the drinks all til
fternoon.-Evening Journal
y "Your wife has such liquid voice,
said Mr.. Fosdick to Mr.. Tiff. 'Yes
|, that's pretty good name for it," II
piled Mr.. Tiff. Mr.. Fosdlck looked Il
n inquiringly, and Mr.. Tiff added: 81
g never dries up, you know."-Harper
! Bazaar.
y Artie-Darling, you have no idea ho'
q anxious was while you were comm
- down the rope ladder. 1 was so afral
4 YOU had not fastened it secured
q above. Susie-You needn't have bee
y alarmed. dear. Papa tied the knot f,
me.-Detroit Free Press.
a Walker Home-I think l will get
o lob wild one O. desc concerns VIII;
makes amat'ur photygraf outfits. Odo
4 Gus Oliver-What? An go to work
a Walker Homer-Work? Nav! All L
a have to tackle will be to do de resi-
! an dat will JUS suit me.-Detroit Ere
q Press.
! George just saw you coming frol
! the conservatory with Miss Goldi
, Rather handsome girl, but too reserve
. for me. Thomas-Yes, just reserve
! her for life.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
ever notice what an even tempe
Q Johnson has? No matter how much b
9 Is disagreed with, he never gets al
/ gvy." "So; but wha. deep pity b
haa for the other fellow
|, 1 e -~ratassP