The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1897-06-12

The next thing that | bring you
Is the Editors little song
Which has at least one merit
1t isn't very long.
He sits in his Office weary
The ink he cannot sling.
He feels so awful bunny,
And thus begins to sing.
EDITORS SONG.
Life is dreary,
| am weary
And the copy hook is bare;
| was out last night
And cannot write
So | swear and pull my hair
Hope is fled
| wish ] were dead
And through the gates on high.
The pressman Joe
Has stumped his toe
And two galleys are now in pi.
The ''Deyil" is sick
The ink is thick
And the pony refuses to go.
think I'll sell
And move to-well
Where the little birds don't shovel
snow.
A list of arrears
Covering several years
With no hope they will ever pay;
Still | hoe my row
But I've got no dough
Oh, am a miserable jay.
But while he is singing so happy and
gay
An irate subscriber is passing that
way
And dropped in the Office with horse
whip and gun
And the editor passed through the
back door on a run.
Then down in the bed room he sits
him and thinks
OF the hardness of life and the soft
ness of drinks
And while he is following along in
this strain
These are the thoughts that fit
through his brain.
A RETROSPECT.
When Paris to his Trojan home
Led back his Grecian bride
And bore her safely in his bark
Across the raging tide
Then Menelaus the one bereft
Cut up some ugly capers
| But not one the story read
In the next mornings papers.
When Caesar led his Roman hosts
Away up in old Gaul
He met the bearded Gothic men
And drove them to the wall
The noble Romans left behind
| Could do naught else but choose
To wait some months for tidings-
There was no Daily Ne'cs.
Then when old Alexander
Had conquered all the world
And all his troops were sent away
| And all his banners furled,
He could not sit him down at night
After affairs diurnal
And see his name and read his fame
Writ in the Daily Journal.
When down to Egypt Caesar went
And carried wars allarums
Subduing Cleopatra fair
BY daring deeds of arms
The ''leathery" gossips at his home
With envy turned not green,
For no Egyptian special''
Brought tidings Of the scene.
And now good friend | pray you
! Come listen Onto me
And ! will close my doggerel
With an apostrophe.
AN APosTRoPnE.
| Well now, my friends, yc editors,
! We wielders of the pen,
Who educate the populacc
And mold the minds of men,
From every town and hamlet,
From every pleasant hill,
From where the beech and chestnu
Hang DER the ripping rill.
From where the broad Potomac
Slips silent to the sea,
To where the rough Kanawha
| Rolls onward to the lea,
And from the smiling meadows
That line Ohio's shore,
To where Monongahela's tides
Flow on forever more.
From every plain and wooded heigh
You've gathered here today,
| Like knights prepared for battle
| And ready for the fray,
To gather inSDjratiOn
| And to clasp each others hands,
To bind your hearts together
As though with iron bands.
To increase hope and courage,
| TO help you on your way
To touch the lutte Of friendship
That it may happy play
/ You've come from every section
i To Weston town today.
And let mo say in closing,
When homeward you shall turn,
! Let On the affairs Of your hearts
The Ares OF friendship burn;
50 when again you grasp your pens
pray you WELD them we'll.
And now, nv brother editors;