The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1897-03-17

The rails on the jefferson branch are
given time to cool, these days.
The miners in Forest city work about
one and half days uer week. with
excellent shipping facilities in every
direction, with plenty of unemployed
labor and coal at a nominal figure, For
est city ought to be a great manufac-
turing town, and not entirely given over
to mining
TO ERR Is TYPOGRAPHICAL.
81 wish to say to the congregation
said Susquehanna clergyman, that
the pulpit is not responsible for the er-
rur on the tickets for the coming con-
cert The concert is for the benefit of
the arch fund-not the arch fiend." We
viii now sing hymn six, '1'o err is hui
man, to forgive divine
VARIOUS MATTERS AND THINGS.
our good Bre'r MaXey, of the Forest
City News, has decided that when next
he has an idea that the borough needs
a prominent puRilist he will just send
and get one and say nothing.
Somebody has been writing from
Tniondac to the Montrosa Democrat
that the village has from 20 to % tat
tiers. and suggests that the place be
called "Tattletown." Suffering Moses.
but there will be fun in uniondale when
that scribe is lassoed!
The Grow, the robin, the Scissors to
grind" man, and the awning agent have
been in usquehanna-prime evidence
that almanac snrin9 is here.
Many man never gets on the pOpu-
lar side until he joins the silent majori-
tY.
The cremearies have Dissolved the all
ALTERATION society-"dogs, dairy-Wo-
men and drudgery.'
a Susquehdnna man. just returned
from the far west, says that he didn't
see Il newspaper in six weeks Neither
did the apostles.
SOME OTHER THINGS
Now in jubilant cadenza
DO our voices gaily trip,
For the dreadful influenza
Is loosenng its grip.
When it comes to Speeding the part
ing guest" no one does 1t more joyfully
than does the victim of the grip when
1t takes its departure.
So-called dun times only inspire the
shreWd business man to give more care
ful attention to his newspaper adver-
Using.
Fourteen tramps sawed wood i'm the
Susquchanna woods on Monday. And
still some people claim that the tramps
Will not work"
1t is a mean landlady who won't fur
nish boarders with a comb when there's
hair in the butter.
1t is said that LaCkuwanna county
has a "live editorial liar of 20 600 volts"
VINO is he?
The only thing that makes money
without advertising is the mint.
THE BARD AND BEECHER.
The recent sad and Sudden" death
of Sarah UrCh Kelley, brings Vividly
to mind her poem on the death of Rev.
Henry Ward Beecher, ten years ago.
The poem was entitled, Passed to His
Rest" and is as follows:
Henry Ward Beecher's earth life passed
away,
In the beautiful spring-time upon sunny
day;
His memory. too, our Beloved Nation
hold dear,
The people win miss him for many year.
Though he did not admire the prayer we
often say,
"From sudden death deliver us" we ever
would say;
\ political reformer he has been in his
times
Admired by many, who will sing him in
rhyme
We hope he is gone in peace to his rest,
Numbered with orators, blest and best;
Thou'lt be remembered for many Il day
Rest thee in glory, We gently would say.
March 9, 1857. Sarah ulrich Kelley"
RACE WITH A WOODCHUCK.
Farmer Elias Stanton ran race with
u MOudChuck one sunny day of last
week He saw the WOOdChuClS niDDlinS
a turnip some distnCa from his hole, and
put in his best licks to get ahead of
the woodchuck. Stanton got there first
ana. stuck his heel in the hole, with his
foot toward the SCamperiug animal
There wasn't room for the Woodchuck
and the heel. and 50 the woodchuck put
his teeth through Stanton's boot and
into his big toe. That made Stanton
remove his heel from the hole with Il
good deal of celerity. and the wood
chuck slipped out of sight in a twink
ling. stanton went limping to see Il
doctor.
NEWS SUNDRIES.
Cashier G. Fred Wright has returned
from a western and southern business
tour.
Sir John f. Mcdonald, second grand
duke of CarbOndale, beamed brightly
upon the borough on Monday.
Clarence r. Ellsworth, formerly of
Montrose, but now of POttSville will To-
cate in Susquehanna and engage in the
insurance business. He win be warmly
welcomed,
At this time of the moon, Methodist
ministers begin to wonder where they
are at"
A SusQuehanna carpenter assaulted a
fellow workman with a glue pot. In
fact it may be said that he sized up his
man. WHITNEY.
Tour to Old Point Comfort, Rich
mond and Washington.