The herald., 1897-04-26
A FIESTA EXPERIENCE
PECULIAR FEATURE OF THE
RESTAURANT BUSINESS
The Limits Of the English Language
Not Wide Enough for Some Peo-
pie to Express Themselves

with the advances made in the arts
and sciences the English language Is be-
ing enlarged and new words are being
constantly added. In view Of this fact
1t is somewhat strange that among GER
tain classes the language is being spoken
in such manner that 1t promises soon to
be little better than a patois
We are told that among the very low
est of the criminal class about 5000 words
is the limit at their command with which
to express themselves, while, it is said,
$4,000 words is the extreme limit Of the
cultured individual. The margin of Diff
ference is sufficiently striking, and how
1t comes about may, to some extent. be
explained by the willful distortions Of
language and odd contractions that are
being made every day. And this in no
wise refers to the coming of slang words
long felt want" and accurately de-
scribe in word or two what would 9TH
erwise need q paragraph.
The greatest sinners against Lindley
Murray may. probably, be found in the
persons Of the walters in the cheaper
restaurants, and during the festival
week good opportunities have been af-
forded to pass Judgment. In the rush
and hustle of La Fiesta these gentlemen
Of the white apron have not been al
lowed much time to spare; they have
had to fill their orders on the hop, skip
and the jump.
To any young man just starting out In
life it must have been very edifying to
sit quietly in one of the restaurants and
watch with what avidity the white jack
eted walters seized upon the hungry
strangers as they entered and marked
them for their prey. The business apti-
tude displayed In endeavoring to get
the largest number of Servings" down
the greatest number of throats in CIV
en- time was rather remarkable and ex-
emplified in practical working the max
i'm of mercantile life, ito make the larg-
est amount Of money in the shortest
space of time"
Rejoicing in the vulgar appellation Of
"hash singers" the walters, with pile
of dishes stacked up on the left arm,
rushed in an apparently frantic way
back and forth to the wicket leading into
the kitchen, or mayhap into the kitchen
itself, giving in orders in a jargon wholly
unintelligible to the uninitiated.
lone swim, one boot leg, one ride on
the cable, mashed murphies, shipwreck
and a muddy" yelled a waiter, and
moment later came out a bowl of soup,
one plain steak, Frankfort sausage.
mashed potatoes. scrambled eggs and
cup of coffee. A couple of rancher
men seated in moderately close prox-
unity to the wicket heard this order CIV
en-, and the dubious look that overspread
their faces was very refreshing. Only
after some little whispering together
did they determine what to order, and
then the first one modestly requested a
cup of tea, cabbage without corn beef
a couple of turned eggs and some buck
wheat cakes. The ranchers' faces turn
ed white, and it appeared as if their
hearts had stopped beating when the
waiter yelled out: "One light Chinaman,
old Ireland without a shamrock white
wings slapped on the back and stack of
whites"
"what'll you have?" queried the wait
er to the second of the two as the color
began to return to his face.
Lord" said the Pomona delegate to
the court Of Queen Francisco, give me
the same, with the exception of the white
wings"-and he and his friend blinked
and tried to look as If they were onto the
ropes.
A little later the cry of a waiter 20
"Try a flop and have it bloody" made
one think he had sanguinary intentions,
but he was only ordering rare beef
steak. When one of the walters rushed
from the front of the restaurant and
breathlessly called to friend in the
kitchen: Jim, gimme Adam and Eve
on the ocean," the thought was upper
most that the NEUROLOGICAL beauties of
the night parade had just slightly touch
ed his brain. But it hadn't, for. grab
bling plate of poached eggs, he scurried
back to his post.
An aristocratic appearing colored
waiter called for a BRASS band widout
de leadah, foah steps an draw one in de
dawk!" 1t wasn't Volapuk he was talk
ing but just calling for plate of baked
beans, four slices of bread and cup of
black coffee. A whitehaired old gentle
man had, apparently some qualms of
conscience about taking any refresh
ment after hearing his request for a
bowl of mush and milk translated into
IA graveyard stew" and prim lady of
uncertain age almost had fit when her
gentlemanly attendant, his face wreath
ed in smiles and perspiration, called the
kitchen man to boil three cacklers, roll
out three steps and ante one pale China
man. All the same she did justice to the
boiled eggs, bread and tea placed before
her.
AS may be readily understood, the Gu
rious expressions are in no case abbrevi-
tions Of the orders given, and are evil
IDENTIFY not used on that account, but the
mode of expression seems to be one of
the peculiar characteristics of a branch
of trade in which there are many curious
things.
But, with this kind of thing going on.
what will English as she is spoke" be
fifty years from now?