The evening tribune. (Pawtucket, R.I.) 189?-190?, 1897-04-20
A CANNIBAL KING.

lodging back and forth behind the tops of
the pines, and the lone coyote which had
| a monopoly Of noises down the gulch was
indulging us with temporary rest The
patriarch occupied the seat of honor, a
camp stool, and the rest of US were ranged
on q troe trunk.
The patriarch looked at me- "I'n do
| you the favor" he said, "of fllin my
| pipe with your tobakky. Speakin of sea
yarns that story of Jim's about the ice
bergs that hunted in pairs, keepin keen
lookout to squeeze ship caught without
| a breeze, while the polar bears sat by and
laughed, was tol'bly good, and the one
| you told about the thing that could stand
on Its head on the floor Of the ocean and
Zap the face Of heaven with its tail was
purity fair-yes, purity fair. But they were
just yarns, plain yarns, neatly unrayoled
And that makes me think Of what old
Absalom Briggs used to say, Always toll
the truth, my Lad, IL you're master smart
hand at f.
"Absalom had distant relative-he
lived in Nantucket. and his bother was
anchored In Jamaiky-who brought and
money His brother was a smart man,
nigh as smart as Absalom himself, and he
might have lived to be a great one IL they
had given him plenty of rope. AS 1t was,
he was u leetle too high strung to make
success Of life It's queer how the furri-
ners acquire all Of our improvements, even
the art of lynchin. .t ft
"AbsalOm was master and sole propri-
ctor Of the good old tradin brig Keep Mum.
They were two of a kind, A Absalom and the
brig. AbsaloIn wore o suit Of homespun
that hung on him like n sail wrapped
around q windmill, and the brig was all
right il she was only as black as she was
painted, for she needed sprucin up badly.
But they were both hard to beat in their
deceptive lines, reckon. The Keep Mum
was one Of the best Of her kind that ever
faded out Of sight Of a revenue cutter, and
Absalom was entitled to a patent right on
lots Of the tricks Of his trade He was a
quiet kind Of man, though he had good
command of language, resultin from hard
study Of circus posters when he was lad,
and the Keep Mum sailed 50 Silly that the
wind couldn't whistle through her riggin
even. ll
'Now, Absalom was temperance man
| from principle and interest, though he
| WASH IcilSiOuh anu WOTsuip-
| cd nothin, so far as know, except saw
in's banks. Never taste the intoxicatin
cup, young man. he used to say. You
might miss a chance to make d dollar.
But just the same, after his brother came
aboard ut the end of my first trip to King
ston, bringin with him q mysterious air
kind Of strongly scented-Absalom loaded
the Keep Mum with the rum. And such
rum! In barrels, with rusted hoops and
cobwebs clingin round 'em, they hoisted
il on board. The pirates that hid IL cen
tury before stored nothin weak, and every
year added 10 its strength. Our second
mate, who was a man of much liquid ex-
perlence ashore US well as at sea, took
cargo of one cup. 1t was just three days
before he could navigate, and-would you
believe itY-for two weeks after that when
ever he dreamed of that rum at night he'd
wake up in the mornin tipsy.
"Absalom was man who glanced over
newspapers from curiosity and read trade
journals for profit. So knew somothin
extremely uncommon was up when he
spent whole forenoon porin over u news.
paper, with his elbows on the tablo and
his fingers clutched In his hair, and when
heard him chuckle was interested. Abb
, SALON. Biggs never wasted chuckle. l
heard him say as he went out of the cabin
They're strong In the body, but weak in
the head
''Of course picked up the paper. 1t
told the story Of an awful tribe OF canny
balls who resided on the west coast of AZ
| riky. 1t seemed they were n tribe of reg lar
bunko stecrers, for all the missionaries who
went there were invariably taken In. Then
the queen Of England sent down gun
boat, and the captain of the gunboat sent
q man with a white flag and proclama-
ton in violent language to these canny-
balls. But there was some misunderstand-
| in about the matter, for the cannybals eat
| both the gallant tar and the proclamation.
| 1t hurt the captains fcelins very much, 80
| he landed most of his forcc and went after
the heatheD. Alas, he didn't know 'cin.
| ] disremembcr all of the affectin lines the
| poet larryntc wrote about 'om, but the cen
terpiece of the work run somcthin Ike this:
"They were an awful hungry lot
And hayin nothin much TO do,
hvaygled the tars-the sun was hot
| Into nice scclooded spot,
Then ate that gallant crew
"Her majesty missed q reception on nc-
count Of that, and the foreign secretary
missed two first class races. Then - cyuis-
cr went down there on business. But tho
captain, not bcin on his job, was shortly
on tho rocks. and when the men swan
ashore the heather met EN- with hearty
reception And it was awful annoyin aft
or that to the people on the Engllsh boats
that went sailip by 10 scc them savidges
a-sittin on the rocks and suDnin them
selves, dressed in Dritish naval uniforms
and sarcastic smiles. And the foreign sec
retary had takcn to his bed, so the paper
| said.S tNlH II Lah
1--WE sail for London tomorrow, said
Absalom Bges, who WINS siondin In the
| doorway with his hands in his pockets.
All the information you ever got out VI
Absalom about his business was yolun-
teered, 30 I saved my breath 10y askin no
, questions We sailed with fair weather
and a good breeze. All the way over Alb
SALON. didn't do anything but walk the
deck with bis hands In his pockets and
commercial expression on his face Did
tell you that We didn't unload that rumy
I'VE reached London, and Absalom put
on his best store suit TO 90 up to see tho