The Winslow mail., 1897-09-04
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MARK was going away. Il said, Good
by, Mark; may God be with Won al
ways He drawlingly replied. I-hope
-he-will-but-I-hOpe, too-that he
may find some leisure-moments-
e-care-Of-yOu'
Not long ago the Right Reverend
William Croswell Doane, Of Albany,
paid a visit to the Old country. and
while there registered as "William Of
Albany" On his return (says the Phil
istine) he met Bishop Potter. who had
also been to Yurrup, but got home first,
when the latter said: TOO bad Doane,
that you didn't live in Buffalo,; in that
case you could have registered as Buff
falo Bill"
Senator Cameron once called upon
President Lincoln in behalf Of an ap-
plicant for consulate who was a par
ticularly pestiferous person to him.
where do you want to have him
sent?" asked the President. There was
a large globe in the room. The Penn
sylyania Senator put one arm around
1t as far as he could reach, and said:
Il do not know what my finger is on,
but send him there" And he was sent
Wendell Phillips once, when he was
interrupted by an unfriendly audience,
stopped down and began talking in a
low voice to the men at the reporters
table. Some of the auditors, becoming
curious, called Louder" Whereupon
Phillips Strengthened himself up and
exclaimed: $50 right on, gentlemen,
with your noise. Through these pen
cils'-pointing to the reporters-''I
speak to forty million people"
A travelling man relates that he was
driving across the country to a little
town in Western Kansas, the other
day, when he met a farmer hauling
wagon load of water. "Where do you
get water?" said the traveller. Cup the
road about seven miles," the native re-
piled. "And you haul water seven
miles for your family and stock 2"
yep" 'Why, in the name of sense,
don't you dig well?' Because it's
jest as far one way as the other, stran-
ger"
Bishop Potter visited a brother prel-
ate last summer at popular seaside
resort. AS the bishops were walking
home from the Sunday morning SER
vice, they could not fail to notice the
crowds Of bathers in the surf, clad and
unclad in all manner of costumes. The
resident prelate turned to his visitor,
saying with a sigh: "What should you
do if you were confronted by a prob
lem like that in your diocese?' Broth
err Bishop Potter quietly replied, "this
is not my seev'
While making a post-prandial speech
in Chicago, the other night, Colonel
WatterSOn lamented that he was un-
able to summon to his assistance the
comfort which Daniel was able to sum-
mon when he found himself in the
lions den. Casting about him and as
certaining that there was no possible
means of escape, the prophet folded his
arms and turned upon the ferocious
beast who was licking his chops pre-
paratory to devouring him, and he said:
hOAC Ia OlAC NOLlLOI ar AOW. A1lCI
this meal there won't be any speech
making"
The other day the heavy downpour
and the closeness of the atmosphere in
the Rhode Island Senator's committee
room (says the Washington POST evolv-
ed some marvellous tales about trout.
Senator Caffery spoke of a superlative
catch in which he estimated his fish at
nine pounds. Mr. Aldrich went him
one better by putting a certain catch
of his down at forty-one inches long.
"Where did you catch him?" inquired
Senator Oaffery, obviously. 'In Rhode
Island" "Hm! said Senator Caffery;
''there isn't a river in the State long
enough to produce such fish"
In the Brazilian hotels men are en-
ployed to do the chamber work. and
they are prone to rush into the bed
rooms of the guests when occasion re-
quires without knocking. A prim little
Yankee "schoolmarm" visiting Rio de
Janeiro was much annoyed at this Gus
tom, and, after mildly protesting sew
eral times without effect, she said Sc
verely to the boy who did the work in
her room: Juan, be good enough to
understand that will not allow you to
open the door Of my room without
knocking. If you do it again l shall
certainly report you at the office. Why,
might be dressing!' mo danger of
that, senora," responded Juan, in his
best English, "before l come in l al
ways look me through the keyhole."
Captain Mahan, in his "Life of Mel
son., tells the following story of the
great sailor The fleet letters had Just
been sent off, when Nelson saw mid
shipman come up and speak to Meuten-
ant Pasco, the signal officer, who, when
hearing what was said, stamped his
foot in evident veXation, and uttered
an exclamation. The admiral called
him and asked what was the matter.
Nothing that need trouble your lord
ship was the reply. you are not the
man to lose your temper for nothing"
rejOined Nelson; what was it?" "WeH,
if you must know, my lord, | will tell
you. You see that coxswain:" point
ing to one Of the most exacting of the
petty officers; I'VE have not a better
man on board the Victoria. and the
message which put me out was this. |
was told that he was so busy receiving
and getting off the mail-bags that he
forgot to drop his own letter into one Of
Them and he has inst dicoo1yorod If in