Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-09-30

'"'" IOu hnOW now TO
manage women and could have given
him some valuable advice"
J well, I've never been married, hut
I've always known one thing" said the
dentist. "A man has got to assert his
independence in his own house. II he
let's his wife think that she can order
him around and treat him like school
boy he might as well give up all hope
OF having any liberty OF his own. don't
say that man ought to be harsh with
a woman, but he ought to give her to
understand that he can come t.nd go
once in awhile without asking her per.
mission" A
That's right" said the Flush" IL
this book ngent friend OF ours had gone
out and got drunk the night he married
the old girl and then came home and
chased her around the house with n
Ratchet she'd have had some respect
for him. knew man once who chased
his wife with hatchet-at least once
n month, He loved her all right, and
wouldn't have harmed her for anything
in tho world, but he claimed that he
had to make this Ratchet demonstration
at least once n month in order to main
tain his rights, After every outbreak
/ she'd be pleasant and attentive for sew
eral weeks. Then her respect for his
rights would begin to weaken and he
would have to get out his hatchet
again"
Seriously speaking, l don't believe
n woman has much regard for n man
who allows himself to be tied to her
apron strings" said the dentist.
"Why, of course mott" exclaimed the
freckled boy, with an Indifferent ges-
ture, to show that he was an expert.
"I'll win out in ten minutes where one
of those easy, polite guys wouldn't
make u shown in an hour You've
got to make woman think that you're
the real stuff and know what she wants
better than she knows II herself"
Gentlemen" began doc" Horne,
gazing critically at his cigar as he
rolled IL between his thumb and Sec
ond finger. Gentlemen. went into
n store In Ohio one day and listened
for am hour while three men discussed
the fine points of navigation. They
had beautiful themes as to the handling
OF vessels and some new idens in ship
building. / learned Ofterward that not
one of the three had ever been within
500 miles of salt water or had ever
seen boat more than 20 feet long. Your
learned opinions regarding matrlmony
and the management OF wives reminds
me OF that talk on navigation"
THAT is what Is called an upper-cut,"
said the Flush"
doc, I don't see any medals on you
for getting married." remarked the
freckled boy, with n wink at the dem
fist.
"And you have not heard me telling
of the rights and privileges OF hus-
band, either" snId "Doc," turning on
the freckled boy and speaking with
earncstness "Why, gentle
men, It nmuses me to hear you young
gentlemen sit here and talk about om-
en- and matrimony as you had studied
them'for years. Don't you know that
woman has been the puzzle Of NIL ages
because there were never two women
alikeP How can you pass Judgment
on n husband when you know nothing
of the conditions surrounding mar
lied man? It's very easy to sit hero
md tell what you would do or You
would not do II you were n husband,
You seem TO forget that millions OF
young men have talked In the same
manner, only to learn later that the
)ries count for little when applied to
lctunl experience. Some of you may
earn, some day, that the wise hus-
'ond simply gets along with as little
rictlon as possible, preferring com.
promise to open battles. You have
poken, half seriously, OF the propriety
I husband tanning and managing
wife as he would domestic animal.
DON'T you know It Is the brutal husband,
ather than the complaining wife, who
makes married life hell in so many
ouses? Furthermore, you young men
Tho are accustomed to the skylarkine
nd irregular life of hotel seem to
hink 1t Is unreasonable that woman
hould attempt to interfere with hus-
an0s going or coming, or complain
he arrives home Mt all hours of the
light. Here you sit and consider the
nse of q married man from the stand
ONT OF bachelor. You're like so
lany raw colts not yet broken to ride
nd drive. You can tell how you win
lex up and smash things II they ever
lddle or bride you and dare to touch
on with the whip, but oil Of you will
ecome good old family nags in time
the right trainers get hold Of you.'
Where can get copy of the lee.
Ire, Doc" asked the frecl1led boy.
"And what you need" continued
Doc" SIS large woman with mind
her own, who will keep you OF work
x days week and collect your pay
Saturday. I'd like to meet you, young
an, about two years after your mar
age and find out if there has been
~ change In your Chicago
ecord.
To tho Point