Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1897-09-08
Mjausiae 6atherings.


residences.
s9- Printers ink may be black, but
it sheds more light than any other
luminary, however bright.
bds. The sole duty of one of the land
office clerks at Washington is to sign
the presidents name.
p@ ]. w. Arnold, of Providence,
now in his seth year, and weighing
1876 pounds, rides bicycle.
p6 How would you define 'ennui' p
at is when you're tired of doing moth
ing, and too lazy to do something"
a8- There is nothing that lightens
ones burdens so quickly and so much
as to help other people carry theirs.
s9- 1t is an Id proverb that "boys
will be boys. What pity it isn't
equally as tue that men will be men.
Rag A pretty definition for good
wife-One who always takes care to
have herself and dinner nicely dress
ed.
p@ The treasury department figures
indicate a decrease of one hundred
thousand in the immigration of the
year.
nay" Mr.. Moody, it is said, has stated
publicly that there are many men in
the pulpit who ought to be saving
wood.
s6 Rev. DR.. Bevan, of Australia
SAYS that he ''is not in love with the
average run of globe trotting evange-
lists"
B9 He that does good to another
man does also good to himself, for the
consciousness of well-doing is an ample
reward.
p& "Pa, what's an egotist ?" Gan
egotist, my son, is man who thinks
all the world but himself is riding low
grade wheels"
sR Drunkenness is the parent of
most other vices. 1t quenches the
salutary power of reason, and makes
us the snort of raging passion.
ga" 1t was the saying of heather
that he who would do good must either
have a faithful friend to instruct him,
or watchful enemy to correct him.
s9 "Do you stutter all the time p
sakeda kind lady of the poor young
man. "N.n-n-no," was the answer,
"only wh-wh-wh-when l t-t-t-talk."
s6. s:Where did you spend the sum-
mer?" "Where I lost my identity"
"Eh ?" "Among my wife's relatives,
where I an simply known as 'Mary's
husband."
H4 An indianapolis man swore in
court the other day that he did not
know his wife's first name, though
they had lived happily together for
thirteen years.
tag The latest official statistics show
that the depositors in New York saw
ing banks number $4,000 more and
have $26,0OO,O00 more to their credit
than year ago.
a6r Kansas has boom on, and the
railroads cannot get cars into the
wheat counties fast enough to meet
the demand, and have to beg, borrow
and steal them.
pdF The London manager of one Of
the chief accident insurance compan.
les is said to have stated that his COM
pany would not insure lady cyclists on
any terms whatsoever.
B9 An editor became martial and
was created captain. On parade, in
stead of "two PAGES in front-ad-
vance =" he unconsciously bawled out,
"Cash-two dollars year-advance !'
s@ eyes," said the young man with
the square chin, ~ am going to Klon-
dixie, or thereabouts. Imay get richer
than 1 am here, and if / die, / won't
die any deader than I would if stay
ed at home"
Bdg. A liberal offer: "Doctor-Now,
you are to take a tablespoonful of this
mixture three times day. Pat-Och,
murther Sure, doctor, dear, I'll pay
We just the same if yell put tay-
spoonful wanst day
s6" "Neither your typewriter girls
has taken q vacation this summer" "
"No; there's looking young
man in the office, and neither of the
girls is willing to 60 away and leave
the field to the other one."
p6e The time to do good thing is
when you can. If you find it in your
power today and here to help strug-
Cling soul, you are guilty before God if
you fail to stretch out your hand. To-
morrow will be too late.
H6" A little fresh-air child saw herd
of cows for the first time, and after
watching them chewing their cuds, in
amazement, he said, deprecatingly, to
the farmer, "Oh, mister, do you have
to buy gum for all those COWS ?"
pa" The greatest of luxuries in Cen
trail Africa is salt. The long continued
use of vegetable food in that country
creates so painful longing for salt,
that natives deprived of it for long
period often show symptoms of insan-
ity.
s6" awe have some kind of calami-
ty shrieked with us all the time," says
Uncle Allen Sparks. "Just as soon as
the wall about hard times begins to
stop, and things look little cheerful,
here comes the katydid predicting an
early FROST"
s6 A German experimenter says
that coal loses considerably by expos
ure to the weather. Anthracite and
camel suffer least, but ordinary btu