Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1897-04-06

ley Miles Mills Overy, Choice Chase
Chapman. Married Brown (as like as
not he died a bachelor, although mar
ried almost as soon as he was BORN,
Affability Box. Britannia Bottle, Reser-
yoir Green, Noah Ark Smith, Jocose
Ann Reynolds, Man Friday Wilson,
Orange Webb daughter of Lemon
Webb. VirtuOus Jane Sturgeon, Miss
juliar Brooke, Happy Ephraim Jlggins,
Millenarianna Carlisle, Smith Follows
Smith (Which nobody can deny)' and
Alfred Got Barelegs Ga fact doubtless
patent TO everyOne.)
Some parents appear to have been
determined that their children should
somehow or other be mentioned along
with the great, and so we have Albert
Edward Prince of Wales Morris, Jubilee
Guelph Battenberg Morley Timbers,
ROYAL Consort Darlington, Prince (sic)
Charlotte Cope, King George Westgate,
Duchess DOwager Cushway, and many
similar names.
The desire for long. high sounding
names leads to some strange, incongru-
Gus medleys. especially when there is
an ATTEMPT to make them cOmmemora-
tive. Thus we have Americas Nespu-
cius XenOphon BuCephalus stephen
Mesmer. John XerXes Alciblades Eben-
ezer. Braden. Faustus Present Remem-
brance CattermOle. Robert Alma Balac-
lava Inkerman Sebastopol Delhi Dug
dale (the son, surely, Of a soldier Dold),
and Naval Review Ball.
We get into denser jungle with Fig
bougbanghal O'Timeraugh Hope de
HindIev Turner: and deeper still with
T.vr1nb Ydwallo Odin NestOr Egbert
Tvonel Toedmag Hugh Erchenwyne
Saxon Esa Cromwell Nevill Dysart
Plaptagenet acknowledgements
Thomas Hill Joseph Napoleon Bona
Darte Horatio Swindlehurst Nelson
Karl +. w. C. A. F. w. |. G. o. H. NJ.
Won der Recke Volmerstein.
Rut in this matter Of long names it
nust once more be place aux DANES.
for here comes lady with a name LOT
every letter of the alphabet. 1t IS Ann
Bertha Cecilia Diana Emily Fanny Ger
trude Hypatia Inez Jane Kate Louisa
Maud Nora Ophelia Ounce Rebecca
Starkev Teresa Ulysis (sic) Venus Win
fired XenophOn Yetty Zeus Pepper.
Fancy going through the marriage SER
vice with a lady bearing such a name
We pitv the parson, the bridegroom,
and. most Of all. the poor girl herself.
In the case Of twins and triplets we
meet with some amusing collocations'
such rs Buttercup and Daisy Price,
CaDtain and Colonel Jaeger. Alpha and
Omega. Rose. Lily and Violet Brown;
Faith. Hope and Charity Olive; Peter
the Great and William the Conqueror
Wright: Patience. Mercy and Prudence
Ferdoe. And in the marriage records
are also some curious pairs. A Cart,
for instance. marries a Driver; Goat
man marries a Horseman; a Sparkle a
Smart. and Cole Miners
There is. perhaps, not much fault to
he found with such combinations as
Pearl White. Vernal Greenwood, Laurel
Leaf. Rivers Banks, Winter Summers,
or Virginia Virgin; we may even excuse
Major Minor. Eve Christmas, or Minnie
Rifle. and Ernest Frosty Winter, Al
fred DAYS Weeks, ]. Cake Baker, ".
Windy Bank. and Joseph Lion Lamb
have each the alternative OF emitting
tho second of their prenomens from
their SIGNATURES: but what shall we say
of Pine Coffin. Farm Stock. Oak Post
(ybo by the way. was, or is, a fence
csrnenterl. Time of Day. Fish Fish.
Golden Kew. Ether Spray, Mineral
waters Foot Bath, Noah Flood Ship
wright. Partridge Roast. True Case,
Reecb Wood, Sherwood Forest, Trial
Bailey. Wonderful Goodman, River
Jordan. Happy Land. Brave Savage,