Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1897-04-16

Inc old man sat uoWu tuu tht
pfesuher went on.
In Ave minutes more a bald person
Of more than middle age, with mucb
suppressed excitement, revealed him
self about the mid lie Of the room.
"Preaoher,o he called oui. ~ DON'T
want to Interrupt you, but them
things you call seArchlights--did l
hear right when 1 thought you said
that when one Is showed up In a
tower u can read q paper Jour miles
ava 20
"Yss, sir. Oh, yea" said the smiI.
ing rtavers.
"PreAcher, 1 don't mind ssyin' you
lie."
Travsrs looked startled, and he WAS
more startled when the audience broke
out Into applause. He was shocked
and sosndalIzed, nut he WAS relieve
to see old Martin Nipple, the president
OF tue board OF trustees, rise In his
seat, for he expected n prompt rebuke.
The rebuke came. too. But alas, II
was not as expected.
"Prescher," the president said In
solemn and sorrowiul tones, Minnie,
Minnie, tickle'-ap' 30 on, as you well
remember 1t was wit. / thought at
here things you have said might be
The result OF some sick uess. When you
said that there big spyglaBs in Cali
iorny had brought the moon within
Thirty mile Of tho yosrth 1 gsoaned In
spirit. The idll TIE moon ten mile
n. her than Market Lake. Why,
blame 1t all-excuse them kind Of Ian.
guags, my friends-if that WAS true we
could all trade at the moon ins.eai Of
havin' to haul them extfy ten miles
through the Snake river bottoms,
where dust Is eight foot deep In tu
mer. Or course 1t was y lie. Tnen
that lamplight story about wire, an
thai thing of talkin' a thousand mil
by use OF baled.hay material! Pshaw!
All them | would ha' been willin'
to set down as the outgr0wth oil your
lame lung, but when you get up an tell
about there beln' o light 90 strong that
= msa eau read = paper four mils
away, that passts forgiveness anu
mercy. Four mil! Why, q news.
paper wouldn't look as big as q postage
stamp that distance. All my uaugh.
ter, who has good eyesight, can do is
TO read the paper when Its sixteen
inches or so away. Fur mile! Four
gentlemen sn' Understanding To
the audience-"by the rights vested
in me 1 adjourn this meetin'. The
church trustees will meet In solemn
session right away aa' right here"
Twenty minutes later the board o.
trustees by unanimous vote passed
the following resolution:
"Whereas, the preacher, William
Trsvers, has declared things which
any fool would know amt 81;
"Resolved, That SAID Tfavers be dis.
charged anu degraded forthwith;
"And, whereas, said statements
having been made In a church anu
therefore bsing likely to be give credit
by the unthinking;
s."Resoive1, Thai this board OF trus.
tees hereby cancels said statements
aud announces TO all whom these
presence may come, greeting, that
oobody knows how nigh the moon H.,
but II 10 q mighty long shot further
away than Markel Lake, also thai
them telephones. wire.lights and par.
iicular the big, four.miie reading
light, is declared unconstil utional anu
Incorrect, apu that there amt no such
hinge and never will be-"
The prescher had left town before
NORMAN csme, and 10 this day there
10 . Boycott against sciegce IN tn.
settlement of Hencae. far up In Fro.
mont county, liaho.
But, potent as Hencoe was in dsclar.
Ing against the strange things which
are not understandable, It is not SAT.
for other people to be equally positive
in the same KIDD OF denunclation.
Before this wesk 10 over We may all
be seeing Airshipr, and real ones, too.
SO don't put yourself on record.