St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1897-02-12
A MISERABLE WIFE.

| '"NS W rent OF sell my farm, my vile
Is :" miserable. cannot carry it on
without hiring, and hiring eat up all
the pr fits"
looked at the speaker admiringly.
lie W about fifty years old, and as
robust as man OF thirty. His
whl>kers were neatly trimmed, show.
ing 'ull red check. He wore a
JAuntN hat and ndtty cutawav coat,
and below his vest hung single fob
and heavy gold seal. | was proud
ct him. He was such perfect spyci
men OF New York gentleman from
The rural districts that | wanted to
imprint bis picture on my memory.
$50 your wife is miserable ?"
Yes. kinder droopin, with a dry
cough and no ambition. She just
kinder draes around the house and
looks so peaked and scrawny it gives
me the blues. 1t does, swan"
Naturally weak, wasn't she ?"
"She! Oh, no. When married
her she was the smarlest girl on the
creek. She used to work for my
father, and the way she made the
work stand around took my eye.
She was poor girl, and her indus.
try got her rich husband. y
Here he took out a gold watch,
looked at the time, put it back and
adjusted the silk fob on the front OF
his nicely fitting trousers.
$50 she did well, getting married
on account OF her industry ?"
"Why, Of course; she was getting
only two dollars and fifty cents a
week, and she became the mistress OF
a farm"
Excuse me, but now much are
YOU worth now? Comfortably,
you know; | am scientific man,
and will never use such facts to your
injury with the assessor"
well, professor, could crowd
fifty thousand dollars pretty hard"
That is good. How long have
you been married ~
Thirty years next Fourth OF July.
We went down to Albany on little
teeter, and | proposed the match,
and Jane was willin'."
How much do you suppose you
have made in these thirty years 2"
Hum um-lemme see. got the
DAVIS farm the first ten years, then
run in debt for the Simmons place,
got war prices for my cheese, and
squared up both places. Well, |
think | have cleared up thirty thou,
sand dollars since we were spliced.'
Very good, indeed And your
wife has been a great help all this
tim, p
On, you bet! She was a RATHER
She took care of her baby and the
milk from twenty COWS, [ tell you
she made the tinware hopl Why
we have had four children, and she
never had a hired girl more than six
months in that time"
Splendid; and you have clearec
thirty thousand dollars in thai
,ime?"
Yes, easy
Now, how much has your wit,
made ?"
she? Why, durn it, professor
she is my wife"
Il know it. But what has sh,
made? You say she was poor wher
YOU married her. Now what has sh,
IN de ?"
why, you beat ALL Why, she il
my wife, and we own it all together.
DO you? Then she can draw OF
your bank account? Then she has ;
horse and carriage when She want
them! Then she has a servant cir
when she wants one? Then she ride
OUT tor her health, and has watcl
and gold chain as you do? Is tina
SOL"
professor, you must be crazy
Nobody's wife is boss i'll that shape
Who ever heard OF such thing ?"
Now look here. You say she die
well in marrying rich, and canno
w
and half week when YOU marriet
her, and had saved her wages, sh
would have had now thirty.siX hun
dred dollars. II she had invested it
she would have had five THOUSAND
dollars. Now you tell me she i
broken down, used up and miserable
and looks so badly she makes 20,
sick, and she has no money, no help
and will probably get nothing but
Scotch granite tombstone when sh
dies"
professor, if you were a younge
man, | would lick you quicker'n
spring lamb can jump thistle"
: What for? | am stating this cas-
fairly, am | not? Your wife is NJ
longer young, She is no longe
handsome. Her hands are as har
as local EDITORS cheek, and she ha
stopped over a milk-can until sh
has a hump on her back like ped
der"
"Shut up, will your"
E "She has raised four children. On
II; of them is at college. One is takIn
/ music lessons in Boston. The othe
: two are teaching school, She is a
' home alone, going around in treaC
! mill life which will end in roSewoo
i coffin and first class country tur
" eral.'
stop that, professor, will you /"
= And your wife does not look we