The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-04-27

yes. Amt it all right?
Mrs. Skinner-Willie Skinner. you're
getting too old to play innocent. You
knew that wasn't in the piece.
Willie-Uncle Jim said it was.
Mrs. Slkinner-Well. it seems to me
your Uncle Jim is all the time trying to
get you into trouble. / should think
you'd find him out after awhile.
Uncle Jim-Why. there's nothing bad
in what he said. twas just a little vari-
alton on the old verse. Y
Mr.. Skinner (tTying TO keep straight
face)-What did your teacher say, Will
lie?
Willie Encouraged by his fathers
mirth)-Oh, gee! She was hot under
the collar.
Mrs. Skinner-Willie Skinner, where
do you learn such language?
Uncle Jim-Nhat did she do?
Willie-Aw, she just stopped me and
made me GO back to my seat, an said
next time she'd send me home
Mrs. Skinner-If I'd been your teach
er I'd have whipped you good.
Willie-Ho! Hobo! That just shows
all what you know. Teacher can't whip
kids any more. Any teacher that whips
kid gets fired that's what Ed Nc
Carthy says.
Mrs. Skinner-Well, Ed Mccarthy
needs whipping if amy boy ever did.
Mr.. Skinner-It's n good thing for
you that you haven't got my old teach
er. If you tried one Of those funny
recitations on him he would have tanned
your jacket.
WiIlie-Huh! I'd like TO see some
teacher lick me,
Mrs. Skinner wish sometimes that
teachers could infiict punishment. l
know if l was a teacher I'd whip those
Mccarthy boys if 1 lost my job the next
Gay.
Ethel-When we're bad in our room
the teacher sends us home.
Mrs. Skinner-That must be Terrible
punishment for some children.
Uncle Jim-Pll bet Bill would hate TO
be sent home one of these pleasant
afternoons.
Willie-Aw, / wouldn't care.
Uncle Jim-Would you come right
home?
Willie-Aw-w-w! One day way Sast
summer Ed Mccarthy KEEP on THROWN
paper wads so the teacher would send
him out, 'cuZ he wanted to see a ball
game, an | guess she was on to him. for
she didn't send him home. at all. She
put him in the corner and made him
stay after school, an then all us kids
waited to holler at him when he came
out, an he was so mad he run after
Bob Ellsworth an chugged him right in
the stomach an
Mrs. Skinner-Willie, you'd better eat
your dinner. You can finish that some
other time
Uncle Jim-Who is your teacher
now?
Willie-Aw, it's OF Miss Sanders.
Mrs. Skinner-Willie. Don't let me
hear you speak in that manner of your
teacher again. Do you hear?
Willie-I guess if you had to go to
school to her every day you wouldn. t
be so stuck ON her.
Mrs. Skinner-Never mind talking
back If you have anything TO say
about her, call her Miss Sanders.
UncleJim-Doyou love your teacher?
Willic-Aw, keep still.
Uncle Jim-Why, every little boy
ought to love his teacher. Ethel loves
her teacher, don't you, Ethel?
Ethel liked her the first day.
Willie-Oh. gee! You can do any
thing you want to the first day. We
thought Miss Sanders was a dandy
when she first come, but she's got so
cross now us kids can't do a thing.
Mrs. Skinner-No wonder. You boys
would spoil the temper Of Il saint. It's
bad enough to take care of one. don't
know what I'd do if 1 had 20 on my
hands
Uncle Jim--You'd do what Miss San
ders does. You'd put up with them as
long as you could and then send them
home.
Mrs. Slinner-WeIl, I'd get even with
! those Mccarthy boys. I'm sure Willie
would never have got to reading those
cowboy stories if it hadn't been fol-
| them.
Uncle Jim-Probably Mrs. Mccarthy
| thinks it was Willie that led her boys
Gstray.
Mrs. Skinner-IHdeed! / don't see
what reason she has to think anything
| like that. Willie behaves himself very
we'll when he keeps away from those
boys. They are always getting him into
some trouble.
Mr.. Skinner-Tm afraid they don't
have to pull at him very hard.-ChicagO
| Record.
Making Railroads Smoother.
The fact that within the past Is years
| twO-thirds of the uneyenneSS in rail