The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1897-01-26
wAYsfDE GATHERINGS.
Bits OF Humor and Nuggets of Truth
for the Multitude.


"A pound of phosphorus makes
900, 600 matches.
"A million tons of ice are expected
this year from the Kennebec river
alone.
TO be able to say no at the right
time is better than to be able to speak
hall a dozen languages.
"A clever Partisan has invented O
machine which can split one human
hair lengthwise into 30 strips.
President Cleveland will be 60
years old two weeks after the expira-
tion of his present term of office.
M. Nobel, the inventor of dyna-
mite, who has just died, was a singu-
larly gentle and mildmannered man.
California now has over 81. 900
acres of almond orchards, represent-
Ing an investment of more than $lO,-
100000.
"A clock keeps its hand before its
lace, probably because it is ashamed
OF the cowardly way in which time
flies.
The cigarette fend smokes to kill
time, out usually discovers that time
can stand the racket longer than he
can.
Don't try to get rich all at once.
Any one can be sure Of a conpetency
who has sense enough to keep what he
earns
In u breach of promise case the
lover was convicted OF writing, "Mi
hart boots only for the, Mi darling
hunney."
.-Savo in the Ottoman Emire, Per.
sla, Arabia, Siam, China and the in
terror OF African countries, slavery is
now extinct.
In Melbourne woman gets two
pence half penny for making shirt,
whiie Chinaman gets five pence for
washing it.
In the Pabst brewery at Milwua-
klo is machine which corks, wires.
and caps 10000 bottles per day auto
matically.
"A strong microscope shows the
single hairs of the head to be like
coarse, round rasp but with teeth ex-
tremely irregular aud jagged.
The lowest temperature ever re
corded was on December 10, 1871, by
Professor Gol ochOn, at " rchoiausk.
siberia, 81 degrees below zero
According to college statistics,
Glrard college, Philadelphia, is the
richest college in this country, having
over 81 ,250, 600 of endowment.
Tho speculative astronomers are
now arguing that the moon is in the
shape OF plumb bob, and that the
large end is always toward the earth.
In the last 20 years the Southern
States have expended $S,000,O00 for
negro schools. Nearly every dollar of
this vast sum was furnished by the
white people.
Steel pens are destroyed by cor
rosion from acid in the ink. If a nail
or some old steel pens are put in the
ink the acid will exhaust itself on
them, and the pens in use will not COR
rode.
ALI experience teaches us that we
become that which we make ourselves.
We strive against the inclination to
do wrong, we strive for the inclination
to do right and little by little we be-
come that for which we strive. Every
days effort makes the struggle easier.
=" The reason bicycles cost SO
much, explained the agent, "is that
the cost OF manufacture "The rea-
son bicycles cost so much, " INTERRUPTED
the rider, is that people are crazy
enough to pay SO much for them.''
And the agent did not feel that he was
Justified in entering denial.
AT some of the PENNSYLVANIA
mines coal is selling for 30 and 60 cents
a ton, and the miners are paid 20
cents. The owners Of the mines appa-
rcntly lose money on each ton of coal
cakeh QUIZ but as many OF them are
interested in the railroads which carry
the coal TO market, they probably
more than make good the loss.