davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19

Fresh oysters and celery at Klau
mann's
A fine line of correspondence station
cry just received at Campbell &
Christians
Miss Furith Proctor visited heI
mother in Anderson county the first
of the week.
Postmaster ireland got letter from
a man i'm a neighboring town lately
which asked whether a certain wO-
man, giving a detailed description OF
her clothing, had bought a stamp
here on a certain day and mailed a
letter, and if so to whom was the let
ter addressed? Aren't there some
funny yeOple in this world?
The A. o. L. w. banquet at the
Opera House last Monday night was
a great success, socially. intellectual
ly, unsteady and gustatOrially. Five
long tables were spread the full length
of the hall, and promptly at 7:30
O'clock the assembled WOrkmen and
their families and invited guests, to
the number of three hundred, were
seated and the exercises of the
evening" were begun. A gallant at
tempt was made to dispose of all the
viands i'm sight, but after an assault
of an hour and half, which seemed
to have scarcely an appreciable eff
feet, the assailauts gave il up and
settled back in their chairs for the re-
mainder of the program. This con-
sisted of a report by Recorder Nc
Clure of the condition of the order in
general and Ofthis lodge in particular,
followed by brief addresses on the
three watch words of the order,
Charity, Hope and Protection, by
Chas. +. Scott. w. S. Picken, and
Rev. Beesen, of Carlyle, each taking a
in the order named. Mrs. Sauter, word
OF Coffeyville, Grand Chief of the De-
gree of Honor closed the speaking part
of the program with short talk about
the benefits of that branch of the
order. The band. and Miss Beck !
Miss Davis and Miss SmeltZer en-
Iivened the program with delightful
music and contributed much to the
enjoyment Of an occasion which will
be long remembered by all vino were
so fortunate as to be present.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19

1t was election day and the old man
had been quietly circulating around
the polls, distributing rewards o
merit and increasing the per capita
when he suddenly turned and rushed
b ick to his office where his friends
were gathered, and painted despair
iugly: "Boys-bOys; for Heavens
sake send some one down to the
Fourth Ward. them idiots there have
been for three hours, voting just as
they damn please"
That's principally what's the mat
ter with Kansas. We haven't been
able until last fall to vote as we pleas
ed-as we damn please you prefer
the Latin. For six or seven years
Kansas has been under the spell of
the demagogues From 1890 to 1894
all parties We'd with one another in
putting tommy rot into their plat
forms. You gentlemen here in Ohio
have doubtless noticed with cOnster-
nation, from time to time, what fads.
what fool isms, what rank nonsense,
have passed current for Repu blicanism
at one time or another, out in Kansas.
When Jerry Simpson ran for Congress
the first time, the Republicans in his
district stole his platform bodily, and
then absplved the Republican nOmi-
nee from the duty of abiding by the
house caucus. The people couldn't
vote as they pleased. They had to
nhonse the Iess violent of two lunatics.
For years crowd of fellows dOminat-
ed the Republican party in Kansas,
" hose motto was, "MOlasses catches
more flies than vinegar" AS result
the State platform was often more
of fly trap than a declaration of
Republican principles. The gentle
men saw that Kansas was built on
the installment plan, TO be paid for
in small monthly payments. They
preached bogus way out of debt,
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19

These are popular delusiOns which
hurt Kansas. And of laIe a new de-
luslon has sprt ad through the country
to the effect that the POpulists are off
the reservation killing plutOcrats oui
of season anu contrary To law. These
things being prevalent belief, make
the street car horses laugh till their
sides hurt when they see a man from
Kansas.
This is unfair. Kansas is a little
queer at times; but so is Indiana aud
Illinois, for that matter. But just be-
cause four or five Kansas congressman
have the Iumpy-jaw you should hot
infer that we grow tails and run wild
with the buffalo. When Mr.. Altgeld
of Illinois began to see things and
talk to himself, you gentlemen didn't
believe that the citizens of Chicago all
walked backwards to keep their
trousers from bagging at The knees
Because Ignatius DOnneiIy scrambled
his brains with the wheels in his head,
no one ever thought of putting Mime
sofa in the vinleut ward. Because
Jones of Arkansaw-hOld on! 1t
hasn't got SO far yet that a Kansas
man has To defend Arkansaw in order
to stand up for Kansas. We will
have To draw the line somewhere and
ArKansaw is a good place to hegin.
have been invited here to tell you
what is the matter with Kansas, and |
have come nearly thousand miles in
the middle of winter, to say that there
is absolutely nothing the matter with
Kansas. There has been something
the matter with Kansas good deal
the matter with Kansas. The devil has
been to paw out i'm Kansas, but be has
been paid in one hundred cent dollars.
And that account seems to be closed
The best way to explain to you what
has been the matter with Kansas is to
recall story of Uncle Chester Thomas,
who used to be the boss in Topeka
politics. The old man was rarely dis
turbed, but one time, when the re-
formers gave him the fight of his life
in Topeka, he lost his head. That
was the campaign in which the old
man told his cohorts to "Chur'fer 'em
boys, chur fer 'em, but vote agin 'em. ,,
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
A GREAT SPEECH.
Will. White Tells the Ohio Republicans
What is the Matter with Kansas"
in Talk that
RINGS THE BELL EVERY RENTEsCE.

w. A. White, of the Emporia Ga
zette, whose scorching editorials about
Populism and the POpulists have
attracted National attention, was in
vited to address the Ohio Republican
League at GAINESVILLE, o., last Friday
night. made a speech that was a
stem winder. Here it is in full.
WHATS THE MATTER WITH KAN
SAs?"
There is a song which some Of you
may have heard which begins:
80 potatoes they grow small out in Kansas
And they eat them tops and all. out in Kansas"
There are fnrty-three stanzas to this
ballad, aud the burden of the song is
that Kansas is about the thirty-third
degree in the lodge OF the Royal A rch
Demon. And that a man, after going
through the whole sizzling infeno is
sent to Kansas To get humesick for
Hades- That song contains several
important errors.
In the first place we do not eat them
tops and all, out in Kansas. We eat
them mashed, with chicken gravy.
and fried ham with gravy, just as gu
do here in Ohio. In the second place
we do not have to fill our wells with
rock to keep them from blowing away;
nor do we trim the claws of Kansas
catfish to keep them from scratching
the bark off the trees i'm dry weather.
Neither do we send our abstract To
Missouri so that the grasshoppers may
not destroy the titles tn the liant.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
For sale or Trade.

ID A Ayers, miles south aud miles east of
LaHarpe, has 400 OF 500 bushels OF good heavy
oats raised in 1895 and also some good flax
seed for sale.
John Wright, 4miies north of lola, has clover
and timothy seed for sale.
J. n, Swigart for miles north of lola, has
some clover and timothy seed for sale,
B. F. Clark, west Ofthe river, has seed oats for
sale.
Harry Thomas, lola, has two wagon loads of
stock beats to trade for one wagon load of corn.
Geo. W, Ingram four miles east of lola, has a
horse cart harness, and two good shOats for
sale
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
Scientific.

The botanical garden at Buitenzorg.
Java, has 500 determined species Of
palms. besides about 100 that appear
distinct.
The statement is credited DR.. Burton
Ward that lunatics seldom use the
thumb when writing. drawing or sd
luting. and that the non-use of this or
gan is an infallible symptom of insan,
ity. however rational the person may
appear.
4 balloon was recently sent up from
Paris to bring down few quarts of the
upper atmosphere for analysis. 1t
carried a special reservoir with a
cloclwork apparatus to open it at the
end of one hour and close it after ore
minute. Instructions to the finder for
returning the balloon were placed in
the basket.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
Honed Not.

Mrs. Gaswell-Some people have an
idea that we shall pursue in the next
world the avocations which occupy eur
attention in this.
Mrs. Dukane-I am inclined 70 think
there is something in the theory.
"Oh. hope not"
"Why?"
well, my husband is such a con-
firmed scorcher."-Pittsburgh Chron-
icle-Telegraph.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
USES FOR OLD J-WELRY.
How Obsolete Ornaments May BE Turned
to- Good Account.

How Obsolete Ornaments May BE Turned
to Good Account.
There are perhaps few women who
have not on hand quite collection of
old jewelry, which they occasionally
take a look ut and sigh over because
there seems no available way of utiliz-
ing it, for the antique gold brooches,
dangling earrings and wonderful brace
let's of 30 or more years ago stand little
show of being again made fashionable
by our modern workers in gold and
Jewels. There are, however, several
ways in which these obsolete treasures
may be made to serve u purpose both
useful and beautiful. The huge oval
brooch, for instance, worn by your
mother will make beautiful frame for
a miniature or other small picture. #
the collection of human hair or other
curious center is taken out.
Then there are those terrible silver
manacles which women wore quite
cheerfully not 50 very long ago. \
dainty use for these, and one which
will commend itself to all who like
something uniquefor their toilet tables.
is merely to transform them into pin
cushions. First clean the bracelet
thoroughly and then glue the lower edge
very firmly to an oval shaped piece of
cardboard. When the bracelet has stuck
we'll, cut the board to the extreme edge
end proceed to make your cushion.
This must be oval. of course. and NAV
lie filed with bran.-Dct-oit Free Press.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
Truly Romantic.

Young Lady tagged siNteen) - Oh,
dear me! There's that interesting
young man going past who followed
me as | came from my music Iessonl
He comes nearer! What beseeching
glances! How romantic! But must
shut down the window.
Young Man (outSide the window,
and with a strongly-marked nasal ac-
cent)-Do you happen TO have any old
clothes to sell in this ere house?-Tit-
Bits.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
NV Neighbor Told Me

A bout Hoods Sarsaparilla and advis
ed me to try it-This is the kind of adj
vertising which gives Hoods Sarsa
parills the largest sales in the world
Friend tells friend that Hoods Sarsa.
parilIa cures; that it gives strength,
health, vitality aud vigOr, and whole
neighborhOods use it as family med
icine.
HOOPS PILLS act easily and prompt
" on the liver and bowels. Cure sick
headache.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
RnrI,len,s Arnica SaIHe.

The best Salve in the world for Cuts,
Bruises, Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rheum,
Fever Sores, letter, Chapped Hands,
Chilblains, COrns, and all Skin Erup-
tions, and positively cures Piles, or nc
pay required. 1t is guaranteed to
give perfect satisfaction or money re-
funded. Price 25c cents per box. For
sale bv c. b. Spencer q Co.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
NaInahIe SI,rnl,s.

In winter valuable Towering shrubs
which need protection should be very
carefully wrapped in straw. They are
often killed by the sap starting in
winter
THE grass that grows in Janevere,
Crows tie worse for all the year"
The same IS true of every plant and
shrub. 1t is desirable they should have
an unbroken rest from growth under
the frost and SNOWY. y. Tribune.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19

beat US again, for money, marbles or
chalk.
That is why came so far to tell
you that Kansas is all right. Don't
worry about the Kansas man. If he
happens to be a Populist he is no
worse than the Ohio Populist. When
you wake up in the silent watches
OF the night and begin to fret over the
moral decay of the one hundred and
seventy thousand Kansas men who
lined up with Mr.. Bryan, turn over
and go to sleep resting in the sweet
assurance that there were four humid
in Ohio who did the same awful
thing When your children tremble
at the tales of the terrible atrocities
of Jerry Simpson of Kansas, soOlhe
their childish fears with the hOneyed
words of wisdom that drip from the
inspired lips of j. s. COxey of Ohio.
Remember that Pop. In any State is
just as sweet. POpulism is not Kan
sas complaint. 1t is in the blood of
men. Sometimes it becomes cpl
demic. Then too often it brings out
all the envy In man, all the cUvet-
BUSINESS, all the malice. Then it is
not cOnvictiOn-it is Temperament.
1t affects its victims nearly all alike.
The Kansas POpuiist is not one whit
worse than the men of all ages, who
have let their envy get the better of
their honor, aud who have desired to
make men equal, by dividing some
other mans property. Cain was the
first POpulist. When he saw that
his brothers. gift was acceptable to
God and that his own gift was not
acceptable, Cain did what every
Kansas Populist would do, and what
the Nebraska POpulist would justify
in glowing rhetoric. Instead of get
ting out and hustiiDg for better Of
fering, Cain got a club and went after
his more diligent and successful broth
el-just what tire POpulist today is
doing. Gentlemen, from the tree that
grew the club of Cain. has come every |
plank in the Chicago platform.
In this great fight before the Amer
lean people for the preservation of
institutions, gentlemen,
you may depend on Kansas. She is
flesh of your flesh, bone of your bone.
The Republican party in our state
has been chastened. and strengthen
ed. for the great work. The last year
has taught the Kansas Repu blicans
the greatest lesson of life-the lesson
of courage. We have the iron in our
that makes mau strong,
who shall make Kansas great. For
States are not great
Except as men may make them
Men are not great except they do and dare "
And in that great battle whose line
is forming, between patriotism and
anarchy, Kansas may dedicate to her
service men worthy to fight
beside the patriots of Ohio-Ameri-
cans as fearless as John Sherman. as
iauntless as Foraker, as powerful as
Mark Hanna. And one day Kansas
may give the world knight, with
put fear and without reprOach-
worthy to stand i'm the Nations his
5ory, beside William Mckinley, of
Ohio.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
Value OF Labor.

A striking Illustration OF the value OF
labor, when bestowed uFon material
like iron. is given ~ the statement
that a bar of iron worth FIVE dollars.
when manufactured into needles, is
worth 500; into penLnivcs. about. 81
$50: into buttons. s2n.5U1. aud into
watch springs. s"55 "oA.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
evidently in Earnest.

Gotham Dame-Do you think Mr..
Niccfellow is in earnest?
Daughter glIesso. He asked me
last evening which one of your daugh-
tiers was your pet, and told him that l
thought if all three were married you
would rather live with Clara or Dora
than with me.-N. Y. Weekly
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
How to Gain Flesh.

Women who wish TO gain flesh should
keep warm. One physician puts his
whole prescription to such patients in
one sentence: Eat root vegetables and
keep warm" Soft. warm. wadded
Longing robes. deep downy chairs and
pillows to nestle in. should be part of
the belongings CT the woman seekir~
nvoirduno:s- Philadclnh. Press.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
That is Why He Got Up in the World.
Santa Fe Route.

Annual meeting Grand Lodge A &.
o. u. w. of Kansas, at Salina, Feb.
20 to q. One fare for the round trip.
date of sale, Feb. 10 to %, including
final return limit March /.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
For Sale.

Small farm of Is acres, house and
barn; twO-thirds of farm in fruits of
all kinds, bearing, never failing we'll
of splendid water, land all tillable,
close to lola, and only costs you 1915.
Buy it. BOSTwICK & ACRES.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
No Ear for Music.

Miss Yam isn't at all musical"
How do you know"
II offered to sing oh. Promise Me-
last night. and she said she'd promise
anything if wouldn't" Philadelphia
North American.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
Onr OWN EauIt.

There have been thieves in the city
hail." he said. as he put down the paper.
"Oh. we'll. you have no right TO COM
plain" she answered. You helped to
elect them. Chicago Post.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
ABOUT US AND OTHERS.
Pertinent and Pointed Press Paragraphs
about Persons and Things that
WE ARE INTERESTED IN.
We May Call Him General.

We May Call Him General
Eagle. Fred Funston says he has
but one request-that the people of
Kansas do not call him "Msjah."
It Runs In the Family.
Star: Captain Tim StOver's son,
Lutte, also has the rank of captain
He ruus the lola end of the Kan
sas National guard.
Now You're Guying us. But Fred's all
Right, all Right.
Wichita Eagle: Over at lola they
really believe that Fred Funston
stands up and lets the Spaniards flat
ten their bullets on his chest.
He Missed His Calling.
Eagle: The lola REGISTER is Ofthe
opinion that had William Jennings
Bryan started out early selling medi-
cine he would have been as great q
man to-day as Diamond Dick is.
But he could Always do What he Started
out to do.
Wichita Eagle: Fred Funston has
been promoted in Cuba for his aim as
an srtilleryman. And vet when
young Funston lived i'm Kansas, it
was generally known that he couldn't
hit the ground if he had fallen out of
balloon.
GoO'iin is all Right; but Moore dosn't
count.
Laurence Journal: The republi-
cans Of the old second district regret
to loose their cOngressman-a misfOr-
tune which has happened hut once be-
fore i'm the history of the district
lola REGISTER.
How about John r. GOOdin i'm 1874
and Col. H. l.. Moore i'm 1892?
But Watch lola This Year
Breeze: The editor of the Moran |
Herald has listened as long as he can |
to this talk i'm other towns about the |
amount of business done, |
and now comes forward with few fig |
ures showing that there are no blueb9t-
tleflies roasting on Moran. Last year
there were l 500 cars of freight sent in |
and out of town, while the gas nIetrOp-
Dlis, lola, only claims 1,243.
His Brother Lived Here.
Mail and Breeze: A FOrmOsa man
who bet that he could tell which shell
he wax was under and then invested
what he had left i'm a package of soap
hat was supposed to- have five dol
ar gold piece i'm it but didn't, declares
that There are so many
'chemers i'm town that a man has To
'it with his feet under him to keep his
egs from getting pulled
IfYou have it, Use 1t.
Union: The gas wells near Hum
)oldt are "bIOwed Out' frequently,
md if some doubling people be- pres
'pC and hear the roar, and see The
rude oil fly up into the air fifty feet
" more. they would be convinced
hat Humboldt has all, and more gas
han is needed tor any purpose. The
Fisher and Woods wells are powerful
-ushers. and the gas that is wasted
would supply large city with lights
md fuel.
That is Why He Got Up in the World.
EtDOrddO Republican,: Col. J. II.
of Fort scott, attorney of
he Missouri Pacific Railway, who is
pending part of the winter at the
Copeland hotel, Topeka, is not only
m able lawyer and polished gentle
nan but easily the most popular man
t the hotel. He il a brilliant con-
and favOrite with
he women. He dresses with eX-
RENE taste, eats moderately, euter-
aims hospitality and at no time for
-ets to he a gentleman. He is a most
OO m blo man
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1897-02-19
ShouId stav In Town.

He. who to keep his secret tries.
Should not the country seek,
For corn has ears. and potatoes eyes,
And all the mountains peak.
L. A. W. Bulletin,
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-09-08

for five DAYS and then [ came up and the
captain made me work the rest of the
way. When got to Dyea some miners
were getting ready to go to the mines.
They told me I could work my way
along with them for my food. Isditl it
and we got to the mines in twenty sew
en- days. There got work at $11 a day
and board. There ale twenty one OF us
in shanty, 20 by 20. The beds are
made of rough boards and like a
shelf, one above tie other. We use our
boots as pillows and wrap ourselves up
in thick blankets. In the middle of the
room is a hole where the fire is made
and our cooking done. The smoke goes
out through a hole in the roof We live
on rice, bread and bacon. l have also
stal<ed off claim and have had good
luck. am going to quit work soon
and work the. claim. It cost $10O to
get a patent Oh it. I worked three days
on it and took out four panfuls out of
which got $977. A pan holds about
two shovels of dirt
The man who owns the Star has Of.
fered me $4,000 for my claim, but I
will not sell, as can take out $500 dai-
ly. I had very hard work clearing up
my claim. I have traced the vein back
900 feet and have taken out place on
ly SIX inches long and one foot wide and
six inches deep, but the vein is about
four feet deep and two feet WIDE
have ftty-tive panfuls Of dirt not cleaned
that have been offered $4,000 for, but
| did not sell, because it will bring at
least $4,000. intend to work my
claim about three years, but ,ion't
know whether you will ever see me again
In coming over the mountains we saw
snow drifts hundreds Of feet high and
dead people were seen every day. The
people use gold dust here. No money
is seen. send this by a miner who is
returning to New Orleans and don't
know whether it will ever see q stamp or
when he will put it il : postof1ice.
Maybe not until he gets to New Orleans.
Ispend my spare time looking up the
n
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1897-09-08
Truth or
Fiction?
Willie Gollnast Writes Home and Tells
Most Remarkable Story.
After Running Away from Home he says
he Made his Way to Klondyke. =
There He Struck it Rich. Offered $4,000
for his CLAIM

A most remarkable story of adventure
and luck reached this city last week.
Last September, Willie, the 14-year-
old son of Ferdinand Gollnast, left his
home in this city and went, no one knew
where. The morning before his depart
ure pistol shots were heard in the rear
of Mr.. Gollnast's saloon. The boy
claimed at the time that he had heard
someone attempting to enter the rear
door, that he went downstairs, saw the
men a. work boring holes near the lock,
and, taking a revolver, fired at the
burglars; that they fired back and that
one of the bullets passed through his
hat Very little credence was placed
in the boys story and he was confront
ed by his father with the charge that he
had been playing burglar himself--the
result of reading thrashy tales of adven-
ture. The boy denied it stoutly and the
next morning disappeared. Nothing
was heard from him after that until last
week, when his father received a letter.
from him, dated Feb. II, at Star Claim,
No. 7O5, British Northwest Territory.
The letter says:
l started from home in the morning
and went to Madelia. From there I
Z ~ E.z
went to Cripple Creek. { got there in.
seventeen days, but I found no work
there, SO sold my bicycle for $75 and
went to Tacoma, Wash. had only one.
dollar when I left home. When got;
to Tacoma I got work for two days
loading ship. a sailor told me to hide
in the hold till out at sea and then
come up and they would have to-
take me along. So 4 went and.
bought $50 worth of warm clothes and
hid on steamer bound for Dyea. hid