The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1897-07-07


was escorting a visitor from a distance
through the gallery the other day, when.
as they started to go out, she remember
ed this room and halted.
you haven't seen the three Ps," she
explained, and started back with her
guest. Reaching the room she pointed
to the portraits and remarked on their
excellence.
"The three P's," repeated the visitor.
81 don't understand. On, you mean the
three portraits"
"Of course not" said the senators
wife. Don't you see? The president,
the pope, and the plutocrat."-New York
Tribune.
When the Prince of Wales visited Can
ada thirty-seven years ego the lumber
| men and raftsmen of the ottawa valley
presented to him an address which con-
cluded with the words, Long may you
remain the Prince of Wales. THE lead
ing raftsman. Alan Mason, afterward ex-
planned to the prince that this doubtful
compliment was no slip OF the pen, as
| might be supposed. I'VE are perfectly
satisfied with the queetn," he said, land
want her to remain on the throne as long
as she can" The other day Mr.. Mason
wrote to the prince, reminding him of
| the incident, and has received the follow
| ing reply: His royal highness perfectly
| remembers the incident to which you re-
| fer His royal highness greatly appre-
| ciates and thanks you for your kind and
| loyal sentiments and he will not fail to
| make them known to the queen."-The
| Tribune.
| The gatekeepers of the exposition have
| strict ideas Of duty, which they carry out
| Ito T." Professor Barnard, the airship
| man, can testify to this, as he has had an
| experience.
| When he made his first ascent several
| W. KS hp ont with oil mill Of
| Nashville, when something gave out and
| he came to earth. He unjointed his ma
| chine and, packing 1t into a farm wagon,
drove to the centennial. He presented
| himself confidently at the gate and was
| stopped by the guard.
| where's your ticket? asked the guard.
| II don't need one," said Barnard, 81
| have pass"
well, where's that?"
| Il haven't it with me; it's in my other
clothes. You see, when went up /"
There's no use explaining; you'll have
| to get a pass"
| But you don't seem to know who |
am. 1 am Barnard, the airship man. l
| went up from the grounds and left my
| pass on the inside
"Why didn't you come down on the in
| side? Then you wouldn't have had to
buck against me-" growled the guard.
| Despite the long argument which en-
| would either have to buy a ticket or climb
| back on his wagon load of bamboo sticks
and wait for some one to get his pass
| 1t is said that the little man was furi-
| Gus, and threatened to use his airship
hereafter to carry people over the fence
| free of charge just to spite the guard
| Nashville letter to the Chicago Tribune
In his new lecture on the house of COM
\ mons Mr. Lrcy tells how the late Mr..
> 3iggar had the Prince of Wales and Sc
iect party of noble lords turned out of
the house. In some way or another"
Jaid Mr.. Lucy, Mr.. Chaplin had in
,drred the displeasure of Mr.. Biggar, and
the latter was not long in finding an op-
portunity of having his revenge. A few
nights later there was down for discus
sion business which had reference to the
| breeding of horses. Just before the mat
ter came on for discussion the Prince of
Wales and following of peers whose
faces We're we'll known at EPSON and
Newmarket entered the house and took
seats. Mr.. Chaplin had not spoken moro
than half dozen words when shrill
| voice was heard calling the speakers at
| tention to the presence of strangers. For
| Il moment the house sat in awful silence,
and then the speaker said: ID l under
stand the honorable member to persist in
| his reference to the presnce of strangers" "
| If you please, SIR replied Mr.. Biggar,
with perfect gravity There was nothing
for il but to enforce the usual order and,
| amid a freezing silence, the Prince OF
| Wales, the German ambassador and some
of the Iroudest peers of England were
compelled to scuttle."-New York Trib-
une.
Senator Caffrey is very proud of the
length and breadth of the Mississippi
| riyen when II confines itself to its picture
| fpaV IL of dos
canting on the great Commonwealth AMI
| sovereign State" of Rhode Island. The
other day the heavy downpour and the
closeness of the atmosphere in the Rhode
Island senator's committee room evolved
some marvellous tales about trout. Sena'
tor Caffrey spoke of a superlative catch
in which he estimated his fish at ---
pound. Mr.. Aldrich went him one better
| by putting a certain catch of his dowT
| at Al inches long.
"Where did you catch them?" inquiret
Senator Caffrey, dubiously.
"In Rhode Island"
"Hm! said Senator Caffrey; "thert
| isn't river in the state long enough tC
produce such u fish,"
= o.
One day the late Daniel w. Voorhee!
was arguing a case before an Indians
court and was Gispleased with a ruling
| He expressed himself as astonished tina
a man with so limited a knowledge of tn,
law should have ever succeeded so far II
! beguiiny his fellow citizens as to secur,
their co mission to sit on a bench. for tn,
| trial of causes.
1.-The court will fine you $40 for con
/ tempt of court, Mr.. Voorhees," said tn,
| juTst.
Mr.. Voorhees, retort was quick an,
3 crushing
MAY It please the court, your homo
viii have TO name a sum far In excess o
= | that II the court wishes to make the nm
2 az all commensurate with the degree o
3 | contempt l feel"
To be a perfect story It should stol
right here. But in the cause of truth
= must be recorded that Mr.. Voorhees, late
Y apologized and the fine was remitted.
| o.
, There is an old story of Tom Marshall