Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1897-10-01
WAS GETTING EVEN.
AWAITER GIVES a CUSTOMER A LES
SON IN IMRoRTUNlNe.


Pork and bcansG Yes, sir Anything
else?"
"No."
The waiter in the Madison street res
taurant filled the order with alacrity
''Did you say coffee, sir5'' he asked
rs he placed tho pork and beans before
the hungry guest
mo, " replied the lattor.
You'll find our coffee very nice,
sir. :"
"This bread and butter goes with tho
pork and, doesn't it2'
Eyes. sir "
'And this glass Of water?"
Certainly, sir. "
"Well, that's all want
Eyes, sir Like to try cup of our
ohocolate?'
mo, If want anything else, III
call for it. j."
The waiter stepped back, but returned
presently to ask
Wouldn't you like 10 have me bring
you some Of our boneless codfishf It's
the best in the country"
''No. i"
How about roast turkey with stuff
ing?"
Don't want any"
Its first class.
"That's ull right. don't want it.
II think you'd like our roast beef and
Drowned potatoes,
Didn't you hear me say that If l
wanted anything else | would call for
it?''
Eyes, sir "
Tho waiter stepped back again, bu5
in few moments returned to the at
tack.
Excuse me for saying so, my friend,
but you look us if you might be needing
some kind Of game. Suppose you try
our jacksnipe on toast, "
"Great Scottl Don't you reckon ]
know what want?"
YES. sir Our jacksnipo is fresh
and good Everybody needs to eat game
once in awhile Kind Of tones up the
system.
1--WE told you don't want any"
"Yes, sir. Rabbits amt good this
time of year or we'd have some rabbit.
Squads arc about as good as wild game,
though. Like to try broiled squad on
toast2"
I'D like to eat my pork and beans
In peace Bring me some more water,
will your
''Yes, sir. shnn't bring you some
iced tear"
mot any iced tea"
ITS very fine. "
Don't want it. "
tits good for some people; tones up
the system.
"That's all right Bring me that
water, will your
Eyes, sir"
He went away and returned in an in.
credibly short space of time
'Here's your water, he said, 'but
Think you find our iced coffee mighty
fine"
Tho guest made no reply.
Better let me bring you some iced
coffee, sir -
when want any iced coffee or any.
thing else, I'll let you know"
Ever try any of our stewed mush.
rooms9''
mo, and don't want to try any OF
your stewed mushrooms either"
You needn't be afraid of them, sir
They're all right. We guarantee them,
and there amt any better in the United
States
Il don't"--
Some people, you know. arc afraid
of mushrooms Ours are selected with
great caro-. The man we get our mush.
rooms from is an expert He raises 'em
scientifically
Say, do you know you're con.
founded nuisance?"
81 hope not, sir I'm only trying
your own way OF doing business on
you,
What do You meant"
"You run barber shop on State
street, don't you?"
Yes. What Of that?"
'You have tho chair next to the
front door, ! think"
eyes. f"
"Wcll, went to your shop last Sat
urday to get shave You shaved me.
You tried to get me to have my hair
''s- AHN WIN AlAN L bAkHl 10 llNNN u
shampoo, You said my hair needed
singeing You wanted TO know il |
hadn't better have some tonic or bny
rum. You wanted to sell me special
shaving mug and brush You bored mc
every minute you were shaving me, and
l said to myself that if | ever got a
chance at You ia even up things ]
didn't expect you quito 50 soon, though.
Say, we're about even, amt WEI"
wen be littln moro than even
when | tell your boss about your dog,
guncd impudouce"-
81 guess You won't do that. There,
dozen Of Us chat set shaved at you,
shop. You 90 to making any troubl,
and you'll lose tho Lotto us. You'd bet
ton toke your medicine like little
Going, are you? Wen, come again
Treat you all right next time. Chi
cago Tribune
Zola's superstitions.
Emile Zola, tie French novelist Is
creature OF supcrstitiuus fears and beliefs
While many people look upon tho Dumbh
10 as indicative Of evil NJ, ZolR grows pail
over the innocent number II nnd viii
begin no work ~ Importance on the l7tl
day Of the month. A cab numbered 81