The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1897-10-10
THE RENTED SUMMER COW.
4 cITr MANS EXPERIMENT VT AN
xGRICUETURIL CONDITION.
Erect or BeinE Rented Upon the Cows Ncr-
voua system-The Animals Varied Activi-
ties ana Their Conseauencrs-Picturesaue
and Sudden Conclusion or the Experiment..

Vous hniunIn varied Activt-
ties ana Their Conseauencrs-Ticturesaue
and sudden Conclusion OF the Experiment.
I'VE camc to the country, as usual, the first
OF June" said the man who hired the COW.
'"Thc boy had gotten through his examinations
with honor-he takes after me In his fondness
for books-and 1t began to get warm in the city,
50 we started, as usual, and landed, rs usual,
in the doar old place.
" Jonathan said my vito to me at the tea
table that night, I'VE must have a cow
" Yes I groancd, and j hate the bother Of
getting her. That isn't the meancst part of II,
either. The COW market is always bullcd when
l want to buy in the spring. and bearcd when
want 10 sell in the fall.
"'Ncs.' said my wife, thoughtfully, 1t doesn't
seem as though a COW could deteriorato so
much in four months
It, the company she keeps I answered.
Our hired men would demoraliEc Satan
" How much did you pay for that Holstcin
last ycari'
"'Sixty dollars. and ! was mighty glad to get
ten for her in September
" Father said John, why don't you.rent a
cow1'
bright boy said I. will and 1 did.
81 interviewed Farmer Haskins on the sub.
ject first.
well said he, T.never did rent out a COW.
and | don't know as I ever heard ,of such a
thing, but, seeing it's you
No, you don't said +. T'm,not going to
have any of that nonsense. You just forget it's
me and make believe it's your son Henry
"'Pshaw,' said the old man. 4 wouldn't rent
him the north side of a barn to store apples on,
or he'd skin my eyctccth for me. If you're GO
ing to be him. it's no use talking to you,' and no
went Off.
"Well, I looked high and low, and at last1
found a COW and rented her. A sweet thing
she was, Jersey, pretty as a picture, and. We
turtles Of Amsterdam! how she could go! I've
seen her feeding quietly in the pasture at 90
minutes to 9, and looking as innocent as q calf,
and at % minutes of 10 she was two miles
away in John Slocum's corn. The first thing after
breakfast | would call up the coachman.
Lloyd, is the sow all riRhtl I would ask.
Yes, sir he would reply.
" Keep your eye on her. Lloyd. 1 don't
want any complaints. to-day
" An right, sir. / will, SIR
Half an hour after n farmer would walk up
TO the front gate driving a COW before him.
He'd halt and look up at me with a little twin.
kle in his eye.
" BE this your ~critter, Mr.. Jonesl'
1T looks like her. I'd sayVcautiously. But
I think ours is in the pasture
" We'll. 1 wish you'd find out. If faint
yours I've got to go to Jim Banks's with her.
II would Gallup Lloyd and ask Is the COW in
the pasture, Lloydf'
" We'll. sir. she was till ten minutes ago,
when took my eye off her, and went to wash.
ing the carriage with it, siri'
Sec II she's there now
Lloyd would grin.
That she amt sir. That's her by the post
there
"'How do you know that's our cowl'
L know her, sir. That's her sure, the little
devil
Then I'd pay damages and we'd put up the
COW. And the same scene would be enacted
VIII! The uiorne that tAr c"W ate ate. " the Gas shc
trampled down, the gardens she brOwsed over.
and the miles She walked were, and are still.
climbed the hills into Nod, she roamed down
Chicken street, she waded into the reservoir,
glass, wc-descricd her outlined against the sky
and sent Lloyd 10 rescue her, Whether II was
owned. or whether she took a mischicvous de-
light in iormcntipg us because, we hailed from
fence could restrain her, no eye be watchful
enough to hold her in check.
NOW we live a mile and a half from the station.
l come from the city every day with pleasure, hut
after hard work there all day docs any one think
want to walk Tint Eerpendicular mile and a
But that's What had to do time after time when
LLOYD turned his back on the cow and she
NannpDNed the ranCll. men LLOYD went OF 10
,,oS Tor her. aud ;, rs the country folks. say,
'hOofCd ii hUm.'
The end came at last. Ono day the COW
had disappeared a usual, and Lloyd in consc.
uucnrr of my repeated commands. expressed
with more fcrvor than .devoutncss, had driven
down 10 the station and then started or ON his
daily huu;. Ii MAS successful. in fact SO sue.
gcssiul That he appeared driving the COW just as
Hello, lloyd, / cried. Go the cowi'
" see here, ii will take you half an hour to
1riNsn Ilr hmm. IHnltpn her IN rho hnRl nf the
wagon and jump in
lloyd looked doubtful. DO you think she'll
" Coz OF course she'll 60. I'd like to see
her help herself II she's tied to the back axle of
this wagon. with the horse trottinS in front. Get
n rope from tho Postmaster and come on
Lloyd got a rope aud fastened it around the
cows horns. Then he looked ur at me;
Don't YOU think. sir. il would be better II
! you held the end o. the ropc' Then II she didn't
like it and acted bad YOU could let go. Cows
are very uncertain animals. sir. and they're
took queer sometimes, which I've seen myself,
:" Hold the ropci Not q bit Of it. She'd yank
me out OF the wagon Just from spite, and II let
go Of the rope we'd have 10 chase her all night
over the mountain yondcr. Tic her to the axle
so Lloyd made her fast to the back axle and
got in AND, we started. The next mo:nent there
was a below OF fright and Indignation, an in
furintcd COW climbing into the back end OF the
wagon. and | found. myself over in the meadow
beside the road without knowing how got
there. Then the COW stood on her hind legs.
Then she stood on her fore LEGS. Then she
braccu ncTSclI. all iOur 1cct Wlue apart, anu
rugged at the rope with might and main. Then
she tried TO toss the wagon and gave IL n fine
tip, sending Lloyd half way over on the horses
back. Then she tried to run around and catch
the horse. who was backing and plunging in
fear. Then she climbed into the wagon again,
Then she did everything she had done before all
nj once.
II cannot give the details of what followed.
! only know that had II ticeting vision Of n
Ferris wheel, small, but very active, n conglom-
crate of horse and cow and wagon. whose
spokcs flew around with inconceivablc rapidity
and earsplitting, crackings till suddenly there
came n burst Of fragments, and then an i'm
measurable silence and l lay back on the grass
in II dead faint.
" 'Snkcs alive, Mr.. Jones' the local butcher
was saying when came TO. i wouldn't give
you two shillings for that there COW. No. sir.
Id lose money on her II | did. Why, she's
nothing hut mincemcat, that COW amt, nothing
hui minccmcat. And she's so mixed up with
wagon spokcs that ~ have to Gnt, her FIVE
taken to giving loothpicks along with their
bologna.
You're welcome to the COW. said ! fecbly
as ] climbed into n kindly neighbor'S wagon.
hat don't you bring me any Of your bologna. "
How 90 Drink without Getting Drunk.