Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1897-01-20
PERILS Of EDUCATION.

PERlLS OF EDUCATlUN.
"Speakin' bout eddecashun," said
the old mountaineer, as Free Press
writer sat on log at his door smlok
ing a pipe, "speakin' bout this yere ed
decashun that yo' git outer skules and
books and papers, never could abide
it,"
"Most people believe in education"
I replied.
"Let 'em believe. That very biz
ness of book-larnin' is the cause of'my
hevin' a second wife, this ole, shakelty
cabin, and of my son Tom bein' the
Lord knows whar' !"
"I would like to hear your story"
"Wall, hain't no objeckshuns to
tellin' it, and mebbe it'll prove warn
in to yo' not to try to be too powerful
smart. Yo' see, had son Tom, and
he was so cute that everybody said I
orter send him down to Knoxville to
be eddecated. Iwas jest fule 'nuff to
do it, and things turned out as might
hev been expected!"
"Did he go to the bad?"
"No, not that, but he sent the rest
of US thar. AFTER he'd bin down thar
bout two Vars, be comes home one
day on a visit. We was livin'' three
miles up the road then. ! had
mighty good log house jest at the foot
of what we call Coon mountain. Way
up on the top of the mountain was
thumpin big rock, standin' thar all
alone by itself. Tom had seed that
rock dozen times before this day
I'm speakin' of, but wasn't idiot huff
to meddle with it. Wall, when he
cum home he began to talk about nat
eral science, material philosophy, full
crums, levers and all sich, and bimbeby
he said he was eddecated 'nuH to tip
the big rock over. Sez I to him, sez I,
Tom, don't be CROWN over your old
dad. Eddecashun can't tip over rocks
no mo- than it can raise con stalks
twenty feet high. "
"But it can," he said, as he shook
his head and sighed heavily.
"Yes, I found out that she could.
Tom he talked till he got me riled up,
and jest told him that if he could tip
that rock over with his own hands I'd
gin him a mewl colt. He grins and
chuckles and says he'll 'stonish me,
and I'm free to say that he did. The
onery critter toted his fulcrums and
levers and material philosophy up the
mountain, and went to work on that
rock. One AFTERNOON, when was hoe
in CON and cussin the poor quality of
the sile, sunthin' happened"
"The rock moved, presume"
"She did, stranger-she did Nate
raj philosophy was too much for her,
and she rolled over and took start.
She was jest in line with the house,
but we hadn't thought o. that. I
heard noise like the heels of 10000
nevis a.kickin' on a barn door to
once, and I looked up to see that ole
50-toner a.comin'. The ole woman
was in the cabin a.singin' Happy Day
and patchin' my trousers, and she
didn't hear me holler. The rock made
a bee-line fur the cabin, smashin' and
crashin' and maxim the airth tremble,
and when she struck it was like the
fall of so big trees to once.
"And your wife"
"Never ever found piece of her !
Everything was carried across the road
into ravine 80 feet deep, and could
never be exactly sartin of the spot.
whar the cabin STOOD"
"And what became of Tom ?"
"Run away, and I've never sot eyes
on him sence. Dasn' face me arter
that, reckon, though I got over my
madness arter bit. I had to build
this year cabin, git spliced to that ar
woman inside, and lose my only son,
all on account of what they call eddie
cashun, an yo' can't wonder I'm agin
it. Yes, I'm powerful down on eddie
casEun. Stranger, be yo' one of them
eddicsted crittes?"
~ can't say I am."
"Then it's all right, and you kin hev
the best bed in the house and roast
chicken fur breakfast If yo' was
eddicated, however, I'd be bound to
say you'd better hitch up and move on"