The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1897-03-08
NO FRENCH MENUS FOR HIM.
A Michigan Legislator Wants 10
Abolish Them by Law.

Out in that part of the wild and woolly
west which constitutes the state of Mich
igan any man who is a little more weird
than his fellow men is usually sent. not
to the asylum, but to the legislature.
That's how they get so many strange and
awful laws in that state. A recent offer
ing in this line is by Representative Good
el of Wayne county, and is regarded as
the prize specimen of the present session.
Wayne county is in the southeastern part
of Michigan, and includes within its boun-
daries Detroit and the Hon. Potato Pin
gree. 1t is largely given over TO the raising
OF hay. Mr.. Goodel is also a product of
the soil. He is a plain, hard-hsted straight
spoken son of toll; no fangle-dangles about
him, as he frequently tells his constituents
in political meetings assembled, and he has
no patience with highty-tighty notions;
therefore, when Mr.. Goodel who with one
of his constituents, recently went to Chi
cago to see the city, dropped into a res
taurant which puts forth pretensions to
being "ee-light," in the language OF that
community. he was rather out of place
This impressed itself upon him to such an
extent that he restrained his constituent
who was about 10 discard coat and cuffs
and sit down ia the unobtrusve comfort
of shirt sleeves, as an honest tiller of the
soil should, and suggested that he thought
il wouldn't do. Then no tipped back in
his chair looked around the walls for
signs, such as Hams and Eggs, 15c :"
"Beefsteak, with Potatoes and Coffee
20c.;' and '2 Fish Balls with Rolls, 10c. ."
which constitute the main mural decora-
ton Of the heightened restaurants OF
Wayne county. Seeing none. no whistled
for a waiter. The walter came. smiling
and obsequious.
What you got to eat?" demanded Rep
resentative Goodel of Wayne.
The waiter bowling, handed a menu TO
the legislator, and another TO his friend
lie did not speak, because there was no
need of It. Mr.. Goodel thought him unso-
ciable. He wasn't; he was French. SO
his for a moment and then broke out:
Great turnips! It's Latin"
''No. It's Eyetalian," corrected the
other. This is what comes of unre-
stricted immigration"
SAY, honorable" said his companion
nervously ION formal occasions in Wayne
county they address their legislators as
"honorable'O. ''Thls is too rich for me.
Let's sneak. I want TO git somewhere
where l can shuck my coat and eat like a
ChPstian."
mo, sir" replied Mr. Goodel emphati-
cally. Were going TO stick II through
now. No foreign language can bluff me.
/ stand here on the rights Of an Ameri-
can citizen and the Monroe doctrine.
Here, waiter; bring us some Of this"
He pointed to an article on the menu
and the waiter wrote II down murmur-
ing "Pommes de terre la Chateaubri-
and" to indicate that he had the right
article
''some of that, too" he added putting
his finger down on the menu.
"Pommes de terre au madere. Oui,
m sieu'," said the walter.
'Took-a here, HONORABLE" put In the
constituent, "all them dishes along the
middle there has pomnhys de terry on 'em.
What's that for do you reckon2"
That's dago for dishes ready now or
paw at the desk or something like that"
explained the legislator.
Most likely" agreed the other. but.
saw. Honorable, here's some with long
names to 'em. Spozen we get some o.
them, and maybe Wen get more for our
money. There's a good one right there"
So pommes de terre au riz, a iorange, |
was added to the list. Then following out
this suggestion as TO length, the legisla or
made a further selection and boldly plung-
ed into the unknown language.
Bring Us some Of that pommys de terre
a la maytree dee hotel"
'Mais. m'sieu'," put In the walter start |
sam. Eat you haf ordaire. Eet is all ze--"
"That1l do" interrupted Representative |
Goodel When / need advice from you |
I'll order It and pay for IT, Bring those
things quick. Hold up there he added |
as the waiter started away. Wei. want
some potatoes. Bring US some OF those
pat-aties a lee espag-nawl That SPELL |
ing wouldn't win any prize in our SPELL !
Ing bees at home"
you're a hand at furrin tongues. amt |
you, Honorable,' said the constituent In |
great admiration. "Where'd you ever learn |
IT. / didn't know you was to coolidge"
Waving away the compliment, the legls- |
lator began 10 talk politics. Meantime |
the puzzled waiter had gone to the mana
ger and told him about IL.
let them order what they want" said |
that official and bring what they order |
Perhaps they're yegetarians. Anyway |
it's not our AFFAIR what they eat"
Accordingly the dishes were brought and |
set before the two Wayne county men. The |
legislator tackled one dish and pushed an.
other over to his companion. simulta- ]
neously both reached for another dish.