davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19
Epterprises of Great Pith and Moment

Have, ere now, had their currents, turned
awry," as Hamlet says. by an attack of dys-
Iepsia. Napoleon failed to improve his adj
vantage at Austerlitz in consequence, it IS
said, of indigestion brought on by some in
discretion in eating. In order to avoid dys,,
pepsia, abstain from over indulgence, and
letters Stomach Bitters, more effective
than any dietetic in improving the tone of
the stomach. Liver complaint, chills and
fever, and rheumatism are annihilated by
the RitterS
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19
Her Regret.

He was worth good deal in money, but
not in anything else. :,
81 am sorry to have to leave you so much" y
he said, as he put on his overcoat and start
ed for the club.
81 am sorry you can't leave me more and
do it sooner" she returned.
And somehow that bothered b i'm all the
evening. In fsct, he was somewhat tempt
ed 70 change bis will.-Chicago Post.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

Trenton, n; J., June "a Especially; Suit
Register Company of Dayton, Ohio, against
Edwards & Vreeland, grocers of Paterson,
y. j., who use Globe cash register, which
the National Company claims infringes it's
patents. An injunction and damages are
asked for
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19
Very Natural.

He-Thcy tell me your husband is great
artist.
She-That he is. He painted picture OF
some onions for the last exhibition, and
they were SO natural that the committee put
them on the top line, so that the people
wouldn't smell them.-Yonkers Statesman.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

No matter how much a man protests that
he won't tell you about Il row he has had
with neighbor, if you handle him care
fully, he will tell you all about it.-Nash
ingtun Democrat.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

The man who Is always pretending that
he does so much for others, needs watch
ing.-Washington Democrat.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

Women like to talk of death in which
the sickness was 50 brief that the victim was
'perfectly well on Monday, and laid in his
ng."-Atchison Globe.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19
Halls Catarrh Cure
Is a Constitutional Cure. Price 75c.

Queen Victoria always looks so solemn +"
You'd look solemn if you had had the
prince of Wales for a son all these wears"
Chicago Record
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

Piso's Cure for Consumption is an A M
l Asthma medicine.-W. r. Williams. An.
tioch, ILL.,, April II, 1891.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19
Light matchmaking gas pipes.

When a man moves away and then comes
back he always. feels lil< apoogizing for it
Washington Democrat.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

You can always tell false teeth because
they are so much nearer perfect than natu,
raj ones.-W ashington Democrat,
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

'T heard you fought duel with Parker"
IT did" weren't you afraid to stand uE
before loaded pistol!" Not with Par e1
holding it. I'm Insured in his company. -
Tit-Bits.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

Very Mean.-Mrs. Snaggs-'1 read a para
graph in the paper which said: Woman
was made before mirrors, but it wasn't her
fault!' Don't you think that is a mean re-
mark to make about woman!' MIR. Snaggs
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

Teachcr-"Where were you yesterday"
Pupil (whimpering was all Billy
Smiths fault. He hipnertized me an made
me SO fshin' with him"
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

Mrs. Newed-'Was I nervous dear, dur.
ing, the ceremony" Miss Spitegirl-Well, q
trltie at first, darling, but not after William
had said yes Truth.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

Willie-"Say, pa" Pa-"Wel, what is
it?' WiliA"Why do they always weigh
the babies as soon as they are born? Do
people always pay for them by the pound,
the same as for raw meat!'-Cleveland
Leader.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19
Dodging.

Tolliver-Can you let me have ten do,h,.
for week, old man? e's
Duero-What weak old man?-Harl.m
Life.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

The stupid son of stupid father mich,
be called chip of the old b!ockhead.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

The Tramp-"Can you tell me how can
get some work, sir =" The Citizen (crust
ily)-'ies; buy bicycle and try to keep
it clean!"-Yonkers Statesman.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

Yes, | think it is. What the writer
meant to say was that woman was made
before mirrors and had been before them
graph.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19

"What's the natter?" inquired q. g
man, as he entered the sanctnm for . .
and noted the editors bleeding nose So s Copy
len forehead, pulled. red eye and tai, smo,
dusty. coat. Fall downsiairsn "NoNaselI,
that" replied the editor. pointing with ".
hhnger t to a paragraph in the. paper before ",
Smith wedding. 1t ought to read. aHplS ;yy.
Smiths drmpled, shining face formadd 'ss
pleasing contrast with Mr.. Crapleys st .u :
bold physiognomy. But see how = ione,
printed" And the foreman read "a, ~
Smiths pimpled, skinny face formal ias
pleasing contrast with Mr.. Crapley's ston. :
h bsld physGgnomyh "GIapley was Just K
blood streaked handkerchief in Tia Ss oae
basket and feeling in his pockets for ~ ciaas
one, "and he-but just send that fol ', .
proof reader in here! There's fight jss - :
me yetl"-Typographical journal. s "
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1897-08-19
"stnr Tobacco, ,,

"stnr Tobacco.
As you chew tobacco for pleasure -.
Star. 1t is not only the best, but the No. -
lasting, and therefore the cheapest. '0ss
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09

Speaking roughly, quart Of oys-
ters contains on the average about
the same quantity of actual nutritivs
substance as q quart of milk or Q
pound Of very lean beef or a pound
and a half Of fresh Goldfish or two
thirds of q pound Of bread. But
while the weight of actual nutri.
ment in the different quantities of
food material named IL very nearly
the same the quality is widely dif-
ferent That Of the very lean meat
or Goldfish consists mostly Of what
are called In chemical language pro-
tein compounds, or flesh formers"
the substances which make blood,
muscle, tendon, bone, brain and
other nitrogenous tissues. That OF
the bread contains but little of these
and consists chiefly Of starch, with q
little fat and other compounds,
which serve The body as fuel and
supply 1t with heat and muscular
power. The nutritive substance Of
oysters contains considerable Of both
the flesh forming and the more es
pecially heat and force giving ingro
dients. Oysters come nearer to milk
than almost any other common food
Their values for supplying the body
with material to build up It's parts,
repair its wastes and furnish it with
heat and energy would be pretty
nearly the same.-Exchange.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
Sleeping In Gloves.

There is an anecdote Of DR.. Russell,
the famous war correspondent. The
most unenviable position in which he
ever found himself was not In battle;
but In bed. As the story runs, the
correspondent was on the way to
India with the Prince Of Wales and
stopped at the palace in Athens. Tbs
king made an appointment with him
for an early walk. DR.. Russell nass
rates: II went up stairs to bed. ]
couldn't sleep. The mosquitoes bit
me to their hearts content, particu:
larly about the hands and arms. !
happened to have pair Of long white
kid gloves in my bag. I got up and
put them on. 1awoke In the morn
Ing with the knowledge Of having
somebody by my bedside. It was the
king, accompanied by his big dog:
It was $50! 1sat up in bed. In half
an hour, Mr., Russell, said the king,
smiling as he left the room, I shall
come back for you At breakfast
that morning, during moment ct
silence, the king, addressing the
queen, with o sly glance in my direc-
don, said: Well, I've met a great
many dandies in my time. but Mr.
Russell beats them all. He actually
sleeps In white kid gloves"
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
Patents

Caveats and Re- Issues secured; 1Tdde Marks
and Copyrights registered; Opinions given as
70 validity and Infringement of patents As.
ssgnments, Contracts, etc, prepared and recor-
ded, and all business in the Patent Office in
tbs UNITED STATES and all FOREIGN
COUNTRIES promptly and carefully pros
ecuted. Upon receipt Of model or sketch or
photograph of invention with description,
will advise as to pateptability free Of charge
Main offices directly across from the U. s.
Patent Office, and attention is specially called
to my perfect and long established facilities
for the most vigorous and successful prose-
cution of applications for patent and for
tending to all business entrusted to my care,
in the shortest possible time. Rejected cases
specially. FEES MODERATE and exclu-
sive attention. given to patent business. Book
of information anti advice, and special refer.
snoes, sent without charge upon request.
J. r. LlTTELL,
Attorney and CounseNor in Patent Causes,
Washington, d. c.,
Opposite U. s, Patent Office
(Aeation this Papsr)
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
OFFIcR-MASONIC BUILDING.
East Main Street.
Church Directory.

Reformed Church--Rev. G. A, WhitmoIe
ras or. Services biweekly alternating
morning and evening. Services ednes'
day. Z D. m, Sunday School Up. M.
Guild each Lords Day 30 p. m. ether SER
vices announced from the pulpit.
Lutheran Church Rev. A. Bredenbek, pas
t,r. Services, Sunday 10 A. n. and $50 P.
NJ, Sunday School, 2. P. Y Prayer Meet
ing, Wednesday, Gas P.
United Brethren Church-Rev E: G. B.
Castle Pastor. Regular Services by ap.
appointment from the pulpit
Glass Meeting every two weeks at 10 a. m.
Prayer Meeting every Thursday evening.
Sunday School Pm.
Mite Society m-monthly, wednesday
evening at 8 o'clock. w. Mis-. Meeting
Monthly at Parsonage.
Moravian Church Rev. NJ. F. Oerter, Pas
tor. Sunday School every Sunday, ga: M
Preaching services will be held every other
Sunday rs heretofore. alternating morning
and evening at 10 aid $50 respectively
Methodist Episcopal Church - Rev.
NJ. H. Courtney Pastor. Services every alter
nate S ,nday at 10 A. M. and 700 P. M
Sunday School at o A. NJ. Prayer Meeting
every Wednesday evening at 100 p. M.
81. Stephens Church, Protestant Episco-
nal. Rev. Ernest McGil, Rector. Ser
vices every Sunday at 1880, a. M, and
~. m.
Service on FRIDAYS at 8 p. M.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
Romance OF q Bank Neto.

Some 60 odd years ago the cashier
Of Liverpool merchant received In
tender for business payment a Bank
of England note which he held up to
the scrutiny of the light, so as to
make sure Of it's genuineness. He OBJ
served some partially indistinct red
marks OF words traced out on the
front Of the note beside the lettering
and on the margin. Curiosity tempt
ed him to try to decipher the words
90 inscribed. With great difficulty,
80 family written were they and 80
much obliterated, the words were
found to form the following sentence:
IF this note should fall into the
hands Of John Dean Of Longhill, near
Carlisle he will learn hereby that his
brother is languishing a prisoner at
Algiers."
Mr.. Dean, on being shown the note,
lost no time In asking the govern
ment of the dey to make intercession
for his brothers freedom. 1t ap-
peared that for II long years the lat-
ter had been slave to the dey Of Al
g1ers, and that his family and relar
tives believed him to be dead. With
o piece of wood he had traced In his
own blood on the bank note the mes
sage which was to procure his re-
lease. The government aided. the
efforts of his brother to set him free,
this being accomplished on payment
of a ransom to the dey.-Now York
Home journal.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
Politics devoted to Literature. Local and General News
7HURM0NT Frederick County, Maryland Thursday September g. 1897
A Photogrsphss's "Reminiscences.

- AxuOtOKHoP0oVo nouhlnl1C00OO0s
Phillips Brooks was the one celebrt
y who did not wish hts photograph
put out for sale. you may sell
them to the Harvard students, but to
no one else," was his command.
Possibly this was ono Of the reasons
why "crimsons men" 30 reverenced
him. But the students were not
true to their trust. They could not
resist the coaxing Of friends who
wanted q portrait Of the great pas
TOR Of Trinity to rest upon their
mantelpieces.
There are two rules which must b
Invariably followed in order to make
strong and true photograph. First
the photographer must understand
tho face Of his subjects second, he
must know how to pose that face SO
as to bring out its striking qualities.
Sometimes striking view is caught
In a glance, again 1t requires quar-
ter of an hour.
Joseph jefferson Is the same good
fellow when he is having his picture
taken that he is ALWAYS. We chatted
during the whole time OF our last
sitting. Directly he looked up to
say, When are you going to take
the picturei" Il have taken two al
ready ! replied. Wonderful" he
cried. Just as he closed his lips !
snapped the camera and got the best
picture ever made Of him. e. Pach
In New York Herald.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09

AxPl&0oSAOu u - o~Obu AEsoAs
A trick in which sword is appar-
emily passed through a persons ab-
domen is explained as follows: The
sword employed is a thin, Aexi.
BILE, dull blade. The prestidigitator.
whose body the sword will simply
pass around, but not pierce. carries
concealed beneath his.vest sheath
that consists OF hollow tube, semi
circular In shape, the two extre1nities
of which are bent in contrary direc-
tons In such way that they are
situated in the same straight line, the
two orifces opening In front and be-
hind at right angles with the abdo-
men. This tube runs around the
farther side Of the man, who, appear.
ing ipstinctively to grasp the point
Of the sword as il to protect himself,
directs it into the metallic tube. The
flexible sword makes its exit between
the tails Of the coat It is necessary
to operate rapidly, 30 that the spec
tators shall not have time to see that
the length Of the sword has dimin-
ehed, the curved line that it follows
not being the shortest passage from
one point to another. Cincinnati En-
Quirer. ,
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
RtchfnR Photogra phs ON Glass.

It Is now found that In the art Of
etching photographs on glass very
satisfactory result may be secured by
covering the surface with a solution
of gum made sensitive with bichro-
mate of potash, and printing the same
under a negative. After the image
has in this manner been produced, 1t
Is busted over with minimum or red
lead, and the red picture which IL
thus obtained is fixed and burned &C.
cording to the usual process. The
easily soluble red glass which comes
from this method is treated with
strong s,,lphuric acid, when white
matte design is produced, and the pic
ture appears by transmitted light as
q positive. Some specimens in this
line by German artists are described
as exhibiting superior merit, as COM
pared with those produced by ordi
nary means.-New York Sun.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
Novel DoArtrap.

The early settlers of Bethel, Me-,
were much troubled by black bears,
who killed the sheep, robbed the bee
hives and raided the cornfields.
A farmer, whose corn, being in the
milk, attracted the bears, placed a
tub Of new rum and molasses in the
field. The next morning he found a
large bear stretched out beside it
beastly drunk. The tub was empty.
When bruin woke up, he found him
sell securely chained.
It was an unfair advantage to take
of q beast who only followed the ex-
ample of many of the settlers when
rum and molasses were at hand
Youths Companion. :.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
A Fable and q MorNl,

A cock, scratching for food fos
himself and his hens, found a pre-
cious stone, on which he said: IL
your owner had found thee and not
!, he would have taken thee up and
set thee In thy first estate, but I have
found thee for no purpose. Iwould
rather have one barleycorn than all
the jewels in tho world. However,
on second consideration, thou wilt
make a good addition to the gravel
that Is In my craw and may help to
correct the slight dyspepsia that has
troubled me of late" This said, the
cock ceased moralizing and swal-
lowed the Jewel.
Moral-There are a great many
people who wear diamonds for their
health.-Hallo
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
Tho Trade Of Burhlary.

Burglary Is trade. II has its
tricks, Its tools and its ups and downs.
II is a trade which Is continually
changing and improving. Methods
OF high class burglars that were In
vogue 20 years ago are hardly known
now. The thiefs Jimmy" is out Of
date. Safe blowing has given way to
safe cracking. Four or Ave men,
with a few sticks Of dynamite, rob q
train nowadays as easily as 20 men
armed to the teeth did 1t dozen years
ago. But In spite Of the changes the
motto of all low grade crooks is, ''The
way to steal Is to steal"
They embrace every opportunity
and steal whenever they can, often
making a bungling Job and getting
nipped. After a few terms In the
penitentary, however, they are no
longer low grade crooks, but have be-
come educated professionals. The
penitentiary Is their school There
they are taught all the improvements
of the trade" and there many bur
glars devices are invented by brainy
but vicious men.-St Louis Globe.
O6snocrnt.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
Man AIillincrs Hired by tho Day.

Il Is not generally known, perhaps,
that there arc man milliners who
hire out by the day or week az trim
mers to New York modistes It goes
without saying that these trtmmers
are artists. Their greatest value lies
in what they call original designing.
The frames or shapes In stock are
taken with whatever decorative ma.
terial may be available, and unique
bonnets and hats are evolved which
may serve as models or be used for
special orders. The men trimmes
command a salary of $50 week or
80 a day Of six hours. They arc
regularly employed by modistes
who, In connection with dress and
cloak making, do some millinery
work, but the largest class of patron
age comes from the millinery shopA
The intruder is scorned by the wom-
en- In the workroom, who not only
make personal remarks, but depre-
cate everything he turns out-New
York World.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
Not What They Seemed.

A surprising discovery was made
by Food Inspector Mellor not long
ago. An honest Scovill avenue groces
had become suspicious Of prepare
tions which had been sold to him rs
being raspberry jelly and honey, and
he took samples of them to the In
spector. The jelly was made from
corn starch and was colored with
cocnineal and favored with raspberry
extract The alleged honey was made
from glucose sirup favored with OF
alic acid. No favor Is necessary tn
the production of honey. It is only
required that the glucose and oxalie
acid be mixed In the right proportion
and in o few weeks the result 10
honey, at least so Tar as taste and ap
pearanoe 90. The stuff had been
cold to the grocer as strained honey.
Cleveland Leader.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09

Every ono who admires trees mdse
be interested In the result of Profess
or Heilprins studies Of the pines that
clothe the slopes Of the great vol.
capic mountains Of Mexico.
These huge peaks seem to have
pierced their way upward through q
mantle Of pine forest, which cllngs
to their sides up to height Of nearly
81 miles.
The vertical range Of the pine In
Mexico Is remarkable It Is found
among the sun loving palm treeS at
the foot of tho mountains, and il
stands defiant Of the cold close to the
perpetual SHOWS that cover their
s,,mmits. s.-Youth's Companion.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
John Hopes Methods,

The late John Hope Of Edinburgh
was O man Of many peculiaritiea
He had q peculiar horror OF boys
smoking IN the streets. Whenever
he met an urchin with a pipe In his
mouth. he would stop end lecture
him on the evils of smoking. Cen
orally he finished his homily by pur-
chasing the pipe and destroying 1t In
the boys presence. THIS method Of
advancing the cause Of the Anti To.
bacco league did not meet with
much success, as the boys usually In
vested the money In new pipes and a
further supply Of tobacco.--Edin.
burgh Correspondent
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
The Odor OF an Old Library.

The library has its own odor-to
the born student as alluring as that
Of the salt and springing waves to
the born sailor. Old leather, curl
ous dampness, grave and wise antiq-
uity embodied in a scent. Habitues
of the Atheneum library know. 1t in
It's perfection when they climb the
oorkscrew stairs and grope through
the narrow, echoing galleries and
half lit rooms packed to the ceiling
with faded, dirty volumes whose
very names are lesson In ancient
history. Boston Commonwealth.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1897-09-09
A Deaf Man at the Opera.

When opera was running in New
York, there was no more attentive
member of tho audience than q
slight, fair man, who was perfect in
dress and had a pleasant suavity Of
manner. He was always present
with his wife, but it was noticed that
they rarely talked together, and he
never seemed to take offense, as so
many Of the audience used to do, at
the talking and laughter In the
boxes. He was stone deaf. He en-
joyed color and dancing and pictur-
esque groupings, and he went to the
opera to see it. He could sometimes
get tho gist of q sentence by watch
ing the lips of a speaker, but he had
not even that comfort at operas
where the singing was done in Ger
man and Italian.-New York Sun.