Lincoln County leader. [volume] (Toledo, Lincoln County, Or.) 1893-1987, 1897-06-17
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doesn't look bit like them. "-na,.
JournM.
"fes, said Uncle Jonas. 'that hor
mine allus wus fond O. books an, r,'
he's becom' page in the ligislaturS
Philadelphia American.
Quericus-Do you know wbv fiji,
often called a cold world? Cyni~,
To distinguish it from the next sm
pose.-New York Journal
Roberts Harry fond of femao
ciety? Richard-Immoderately r.
known him to play whist with tb,'
women.-Boston Transcript.
Did you read that magazine arid
on The Working of BankY" "No
1t by an ex-bank president or an d
Observation-Disclosures Enquirer
"The Turks seem to have a mighb
poor opinion OF ihe Creeks "ysl
that accounts for them running 's
down.'-Cleveland Plaindealer
"Clingstone never takes any intert
in euchre unless diamonds are trumm,
why is that?' He is base,hl
crank. nk."-Louisville Courler-Journal
"Few men have any trouble in ms.
.ng their creditors" says the Manayud
Philosopher, but they do have tw
bic in dodging them" Philadelphh
Record.
He must have a kiss for every can
mel, dear. She-Some men would hsu
bought whole box instead of th
measley little paper bag full.-Detpt
Free Press.
Julia, have you bought a new sprilI
suit yet" mo, I'll have to wait until
next month; Dick had to buy a ney
spring gun and two new spring fshig
rods this MONTH"
He-Just listen how that hen cackls|
She doesn't know how little one eg.|
will sell for. She-Perhaps she does
She may be advertising a bargain
Somerville Journal.
Mrs. Jones-Wake up, John! ThereI
someone trying to get into the house
Jones-How do you know? Mrs. JOna|
The dog has stopped bowling. HuW|
John!-New York Journal.
Mr.. Crimsonbeak-I don't believe j
man ever stole anything but he LIVED
to regret it. Mrs. Crimsonbeak-YU|
stole my heart once, John. Mr.. Chn|
SOnbeak-Yes.-Yonkers Statesman.
Joe got the inside track of his wild
this year. What did he do?" "Hl
read her whole lot of newspape|
stories of men who had dropped dead
beating carpets. Detroit Free Press
Kerrigan-Phat's good fer coWhI
Casey-Hov yez got tn proice Nv tW|
hot whiskies about yez? Kerrigan-O|
hov not. Casey-Will, thin, Kerrigal|
ut wud be mercy not t. tell yez7 /
Puck.
Walker Farr-I thought your neI|
tour was to have been through SOut|
Africa. Count d'Ties-It was, but th|
company struck. One of them ha|
read that an ostrich egg often weigh
dozen pounds.-Puck.
Amanda (alighting from her wheel 4
the roadside, where Mortimer avail
her)--Have l kept you waiting long
dear? Mortimer-Long? Many cycd
have passed since the hour appointe|
for our meeting.-Judge.
"You see, it was this way: The
were all three so dead in love with hd
and all so eligible that to settle u
matter she agreed to marry the on
who should guess the nearest to hl
age" And did she?" 81 don't knoT|
l know she married the one who CUES
ed the lowest" t."-Pearson's Weekly.
A hereditary liar: Mrs. Jackson
OATS sebenteen lies yo's tole me to|
day. all diffrunt. Yo' am reglar raj
skillion. 'Rastus Jackson-W-whd
am rapskillion, nanny? Mrs. Jac|
soma rapskillion am young 'un da1
got his ladders blood in him-daI
whad rapskillion am.-Judge.
"You don't mean to tell me you hay
gone and got engaged to two womd
at once?" "Yes, but 1t really amoun|
to only one engagement-half an e|
gagement for each girl" "Will yt
please explain" "Why, certain
Each of 'em is engaged to another y
low."-Cincinnati Commercial Tribu|
A vindication: 81 don't understaI|
why you dislike Herbert so," said NJ
bel to her father. 81 don't think he b
any ideas of finance" 81 am sure y
wrong him. He Is devoted to 1t. 4
stopped right in the middle of his pr
posal to me to ask how your buslne|
was getting along. g."-Washing STD
Mrs. Commonstalk (soberly)-A|
you sure your fiancee will make a goI
home-body, Eli? Do you think 81