The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-10-24
A Joke on the Scientist.

Here IS VIVA: might be called a brand
new one" 10 add 10 that constantly elon-
SatiEg Est OF mistakes OF authors"
which. every now and then, some nosey
literatuT detective. with = microscopic
eye for errors in names, oates. facs or
fancy. turns on, upon those happy folks
who read books simply for entertainment.
and rot 20 pick flaws. OF course. you
know that even the immirtai William has
been run through q ine tooth comb By
these ''error-aunting fisnds" and his
naaehron.snas have been turned out BY the
score. Then there was Dickens: il seems
he played hobnoo with a crescent moon,
just born. that was rushing around the
horizon too late 10 come within the dc
tates OF a well-edited almanac. Thack
cray offended BY having a character. killed
II one chapter. suddenly materfaAze in
subsequent one Dennis has been Toundly
abused for the lack OF correct ulatAs-
matical figuring he shamsfully displayed
in his inal rounding up of Monte Chris
to's fortune. Charles Reade. n a marine
story. had a caStaway reckon latitude and
Longitude in q manner that made sea cap
iains laugh. Rider Hasgard once had the
audac!ty 10 eclipse the moon when Il was
new-aa astronomical innovation which
was not regarded as worthy OF acceptance
by the academies OF sciencs-and so on
runs this list OF mistakes" taking in
George Eliot. Macaulay. Wilk.e Collins.
Browning. and every other writer Of prom
inencs-past or present The famous En-
gl!sh astronomer. mathematician and an
alyst, Richard A. Proctor when alive had
not always his investigating optic glued
20 the eye-piece of heaven-sweeplng tel
escope. studying the twinkling stars He
had most irritating fashion Of reading
hooks just for the keen satisfaction II gave
him in detecting errors and slips Of writers
and many = poor author has REDEEMED in
shame over some unhappy mistake which
the astronomer had tumbled out OF its bed.
But there's that old proverb: Folks who
live in glass houses should not throw
stones" and that ''brand-new one refer
red 10 above is on Proctor himself. and
the pity OF it is he'H never know H. Care
full accurate. scientific, logical and ana
lyticaI Richard A Proctor wrote a mos,
capital essay entitled. Poker Principles
and Chance Laws" II is an admirable
exposition of the law Of possibilities In
card combinations. and may Be found IN
his recently published collection OF ms
cellaneOuS writings. In order 20 give 70
the uninit.ated reader an idea of the rela-
tive value of poker hands" he says: In
every case where two hands are OF the
same kind, The cards of the highest de-
nomination in the pair. tr,plet. four, flush,
or sequence wIns. Four aces beat four
kings: full house OF three aces and two
deuces beats a full Of three kings and TWO
deuces beats a full OF three kings and two
queens. but a full OF three aces and two
thfees beats a full OF three aces and two
deuces" My. my. Richard, Where did
you ind two players in one deal. with one
of them holding three aces and two
threes" and the other three aces and TWO
deuces?" Hands like that simultaneously
displayed in a common. everyday. ordl-
nary poker game would provoke language
strong and vehement. Why, what means
Sax aces? Must have been. and the only
authorized. accepted and bets-paid-upon
pack contains but four. Even the pot
shy player of befogged Thompson street
would have had his razor air-AyIng !.
upon laying down three aces and two
deuces' his opponent sought TO hypnotize
the dollar in the pot with "tnTee aces and
two threes.' Richard A Proctor may have
known to an inch that the planet Jupiter |
is iSf.OoO.c0o miles. 20 yards2 feet ana 81 |
inches distant from the sun. bur ne had |
never counted de aces IN dG /
mack