The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1897-02-27
SAILING in THE SKY.
CALAMITY JACKSON OESCRlBESACOl-
iISlON WITH A WHITE CYCLlST.

"'ON WIN - F''l l. ~ SLlOI.
We Then rays Fine For scorching-The
Proper Dress For Winter Riding Broth
er CIayton's Patent Cold Annii,iiator q .
Great MISUNDERSTANDING Over Cows.
When tho regular weekly meeting of the
Thompson Street Bicycle club had been
opercd in due form, President Touts an
nount ed that all members of the club rid. |
ing out after the first snowstorm would
wear rcd wooden mittens as n distinguish
ing badge. While any kind of hat or cap
might be worn, he personally favored n
catskin cap, with red or blue wooden ear
flaps. CGtskin not only looked aristocratic
and iaunty, but was waterproof and warm
and would prevent any sort of hair oil from
freezing to the hair. The attention of the
members was also called to Brother Clay
tons patent cold annihilatur, invented
expressly for the use of colored people rid
ing the bike in winter The patent con
sists of jug of hot water attached to the
steering post. From the mouth of the jug
radiate four email rubber tubes Two of
these are attached to the feet, u third goes
down the back of the neck, and Il fourth is
coled around the badly. The hot water cir
culates through the pipes and back to the
jug, and spirit lamp under the jug keeps
the water at the boiling point. The cost OF
| the contrivanco is only So, and 1t is certain
! to boom winter spins and make them a
thing of JOY. The jug can be painted red,
green or yellow or decorated with land
scape or marine view. In case of a COLI
sion with street car or u truck the hot
water from the broken jug shoots forward
and scalds everything in front.
Under the rules of the club any member
who cannot learn to ride the bike in four
months is liable to suspension as an active
member. At this meeting Il communica-
ton was received from Brother Stepback
Thompson, asking for an extension of time
to six months. For four months he had
faithfully praCticed every day in the week.
The first 80 days were spent in loss of con
seriousness, coming to and wondering where
he was at. During the next 80 he managed
to get into the saddle twice. He was now
able, with the help of two boys and IA pea
nut man, to locate both pedals within five
minutes after getting on, and the wheel
I showed u disposition to keep in the road
instead of taking to the sidewalk. He was
sure lie would learn in time. If the extern
sion were granted, he would either be able
ing to give it up and stick to the razZle
dazzle. On motion of Brother Sarsaparilla
White the extension was granted and u
vote of encouragement extended.
Brother Calamity jackson was present
to explain his absence from the last two
meetings and to ask that his fines there.
for be RENTED. His right arm was in a
sling, he limped on his left leg, and his
head was bandaged up until only one eye
and part of his chin could be seen. The
reason for his absence was head on colli-
sion with Il white man on another wheel.
As many of the club had often wondered
what would be the effect of two riders com
ing together when going at pace of / 3 ur
20 miles an hour, Brother Jacksons de-
scription WAS listened to with great inter
est. He said:
II was a-gittin right along to git home
, befo' de thunder shower cum. l was bent
over de handle bar, eyes on de ground an
dem pedals jest a buzzin. Way off down
de street was white man on wheel, an
he was doin jest de same as me. He wasn't
lookin for coons an l wasn't lookin fur
white folks. De fust thing knowed we
cum together wild n crash, an jest thought
seven street kyars had bumped together.
Den we boat took II fly. Den we boat
yelled in chorus. Den we boat cum down
ut de same time, an de same ambulance
took boat of us to de hospital. AS fur dem
, wheels, it wasn't 10 use to pick up dc
pieces 'cept to use fur tookpicks. l can't
, Zactly tell you what de sensation was, but
my ha'r haint got frew curtin yet, an il
,, seems all de time as If was sailin around
up in de sky. De shrieks an yells an Gus.
? words of dat white man ain still ringin il
. my ears, an when l close my eyes l XIII
. see wheels an spokes an pedals an pieces o
steel scattered all around me. D."
) Brother Compromise Jordan said he haC
: been making some experiments with thu
bike and was ready to report for the bene
fit of the club. While riding in the suburbs
he had run over cow lying in the road tt
see what the effect would be from u scien
tific standpoint, His expectations wer
. fully realized. The COW rose up as the bili
: hit her, and Brother Jordan and the blk
both rose li!sewise, at the same time. The,
, also came down together, but the COW gal
loped off. Brother Jordan thought he la,
unconscious for two long hours, but wa
probably mistaken as to the length Of time
1t cost him So to be patched up by sur
geon, however, and the repair to his whee
footed up about 50. 1t was his opinion tina
members of the club had better avoid cows
no matter whether standing up or lyin,
. down.
He had heard members say that the,
. could jump their bikes over an open ditcl
feet wide He had experimental with
!, ditch only feet wide. On approaching i
he had drawn in his breath and bumped vi
, his back, according to instructions, but in
stead of the wheel jumping the ditch boil
had gone into it, ana for the next fou
:, days he was II wreck. 1t might be jus
: possible that bikist could jump "a ditcl
and thus save dismounting, but his nd
=, vice was against experiments in that direc
- ton also. He had heard it said by mem
bers that wheelman could strike a fa
> pedestrian while riding at a clip of tel
miles an hour without other results than
'. gentle rebound. He wished to warn al
y such members that they were sadly mis-
!, taken. As an experiment he had seecte,
- II fat colored woman carrying basket O
: laundry work, and there was nothing gen
tie In what followed A clothesbasket,