Evening journal., 1897-09-09
A PRACTICAL JOKE.
One That Had Some Good and Ill Re-
suits for the JOkers.


The "Pickings" man fell in with a
squad of lawyers yesterday who were
talking about practical jokes. Il have
not INDUCED in practical jokes for
many years." said an old ex-judge. II
was very fond of playing all sorts of
jokes on other persons when l was a
young man, but was cured of tho hab-
1t very effectually.
Il was attending the Cincinnati law
school about the time the war broke
out; my most intimate chum was the
son of man who kept large retail
hardware store on Main street, in Gin
cinnati. He was a practical joker as
well as myself, and between us we
managed to make good deal of trouble
for others. This young man assisted
in his fathers store when not engaged
in his studies or attending lectures,
and 1 often loafed around there myself
when not engaged.
"One afternoon in the spring of 1851
I went into the store to see Billy and
found it nearly full of farmers buying
their spring hardware. Billy was be-
hind the counter selling an old man
some trace chains. Walking up to the
counter, / leaned over and Missed saw
age defiance in his ear as if we were the
bitterest enemies instead of the closest
friends. Billy saw the point and
grabbed up an old toy pistol that could
not have been fired If it had been load
ed, and with a face as black as a thun-
der cloud, yelled that he intended TO
blow my lungs, livers and lights into
the middle of next week.
II jumped behind the customer and
begged him for Gods sake not to shoot.
The effect was electrical. The old man
started for the front door at a 2:40 gait
yellingmurder,a ,andIin his sflightlInocked
down a rack against which some cross
cut saws and other loose pieces of iron
were leaning, making a great noise.
Every customer in the store became
panic-stricken and bolted without
waiting to find out what the racket
was all about.
ITO keep up the farce, ran with
the rest. L stumbled over a nail lseg
and fell and broke my leg below the
knee. The sudden exodus scared some
and two or three of them ran away.
These teams ran against other vehicles,
so that all told there were more than
dozen wagons and other vehicles
wrecked. But this was not the worst Of
it. Some one, hearing the cry of muir
der, and seeing the excited throng,
sent for the police. The station was
only two squares away, and in
about two minutes about 80 policemen
came in a body on dead run, under
the impression that there was o riot
and that murder had been committed.
by this time there must have been
1000 men In the street, which was fair
" blocked for a whole square. The
police knocked down and ran over more
than 80 men before they could reach
the front door. Some one yelled fire
2 and In less time than it takes to tell
It several engines galloped up. One
: line Of hose was finally forced through
r the crowd. and in at the show window
which had to be demolished. as 1t was
I impossible to get IN at the door. An
r other company put up ladders and de-
, molishe1 all the front windows of the
second story in their search for the
fire. and not finding it raised their lad
r ders to the third story, which was
treated in the same way.
! "While the racket was at its worst
lay among the nail kegs with broken
4 leg. As soon as it was discovered that
nobody had been killed and there wa:
no sign of fire the crowd slowly dis
p persed, and I was carried across the
3 street TO a drug store. was sent Z
D a hospital, and did not get out for {
month. After I had been taken to th'
S hospital Billy sneaked out to see ms
e and we promised each other to sa!
r nothing about our horse play in th'
store and nobody seemed TO know how
] the trouble started. Billy's father al
e ways seemed to think that the OLE
S farmer who raised the first yell ant
= started on n run for the door had beer
S seized with a sudden fit of insanity
4 "After 1 was able TO get around ol
e crutches, Billy brought his mother ant
d sister out to the hospital 20 see me
{ and as 1 had been hurt in the store o
}. the young lady's father, she insisted
e that / be taken to their house to re
s main until fully recovered. That cir
t became my wife more than 80 year
f ago, or soon after 1 came ont of tn
+ army. OF course I told her how III
n racket started before we were married
: and she promised TO say nothing abou
j it. though for several years, wheneve
n she thought l was getting too gay
b she would threaten to tell the old man
y and she kept this up as long as he lived
e I have not engaged in practical joke
t since."-Indianapo Sentinel.
d A Back view.
r. A dressmaker noted for her skill an