Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1897-06-26
STRIVING TO PLEASE.
"A Snowman Who Was Willing to u
More Thin Most Would Do,

"A Snowman Who Was Willing to Do
More Thin Most Would Do.
always strive to please" remarked
the dramatic editor as he scratched the
words big thing" out of the advance no.
tice he was writing and substituted mega
therian aggregation"
Thanks, 1 am sure" said the advance
agent. as he read over the ten lines the
dramatic critic was giving to him. and care
FULLY put back into his pocket the half col
umn notice he had first drawn on the d. c.
L presume" smiled the d. c., that you
always strive to please. too. don't your
Not always" in a semi-disappointed
tone. but used to have friend who did.
ne really was the most self-denying chap 1
ever saw, and what he wouldn't do to
please an audience wasn't worth doing"
Where is he now?"
Dead"
"Dead?"
Yes. 1t killed him. 1t was this way: He
was In the pyrotechric branch of the dra-
natic ART and used to give shows at one
OF those imitation Coney Islands to be
every river tributary to the Mississippi
He had been the originator of the fireworks
feature at this place, and his phenomenal
success had made him so proud that he
would sooner have died than had failure
One Fourth of July he was going to give
the grandest display Of his life, and the
feature in the biggest letters on the bill
was set piece, q hundred feet high, with
an enormous balloon loaded with fireworks
to go up from the top as a grand finale
There wereifen times as many people there
that night as there had ever been, and nv
friend. was feeling so good you could see 1t
in his walk" ~
Everybody was on edge, too. for the
grand blazer of glory the management had
been advertising for weeks, and when,
promptly at the hour Of 10 o'clock, my
TREND M stepPsd forth like a peacock to set
there was q round of applause. followed
by dead silence as the audience sat
GREATNESS watching for the burst of blaz-
Ing glory. But somehow 1t didn't burst.
The professor fired the train and retreated
to a safe place. but the powder wouldn't
burn. 1t fizzleds and went out, instead
Once, twice. thrice, it fizzled, sputtered and
went out. and then the crowd began to
growl and guy, as crowds always WILL and
the professor began to get wild.
Several other attempts to set the piece
on were no more successful, and at last
with a smothered scream OF crazy rage, he
shot up the ladder of the tower to its very
top. where he had a platform stored with
all sorts Of infiammable and explosive
things, arranged to go off at the proper
time He stood there moment silhouetted
against the sky, the crowd INDUCING in
gibes and jeers. with row and then threat
as to what he might expect If he would
only come down to the ground. This was
his tins to show what he could do to please
his audience. and in minute, and before
anybody had any idea what he would do
next he caught up an armful Of the ex-
plosives about him, fastened them to his
clothes, and hung wreaths and rings over
his neck and shoulders, and setting the
whole thing afire, he swung out into the air
in the balloon. which was already Juggling
at Its anchor.
LAS the balloon shot up, 1t was a terrific
sight, and the poor devils shrieks added to
the intensity of the scene, already lurid
with red and blue lights, while the air was
filed with all manner of bursting bombs
and crashing explosives. Women tainted.
men ran helplessly about shouting. and still
the balloon swept upward with its fiery
freight and passenger, until. when 1t had
reached a point thousand feet above the
mass shot like a blazing ball straight to
the ground.
You will be safe in betting those people
never saw such an exhibition as that be-
fore, nor will ever again in all probability,
and when 1t was over" concluded the
agent, 1.-The audience seemed to realize
what the professor had done to please
them, and they Clipped In and built him a
monument where he fell, having on it, be-
sides his name and the proper dates, no
other inscription except He Strived to
Please"
The dramatic critic was at least half q
minute in recovering his speech after the
recital Of this remarkable tale, and before
he could ask any questions the advance
agent had folded his tent like a circus and
stolen away to the office Of the next dra-
matte critic he had to call upon.