The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1897-03-02
No. SO.
wAYsIDE GATHERINGS.
Bits OF Humor and Nuggets OF Truth
for the Multitude.
Lost time is never found.

Pay as you go and go slow.
Men lose moro by selfishness than
they gain.
breaking your promise toa child
Is one wav OF teaching it to lie.
when is lawyer like a donkey T?
When he is drawing conveyance.
Accusing another often means
nothlng more than excusing ones self.
1t 10 OF no consequence how good
man is abroad is he Is really mean at
home.
The British museum has three
copies OF the Bible written on the
leaves of the fan palm.
One drop of ink will darker glass
OF water, and one bad hoy will corrup
neighborhOod.
a Philadelphia grocer has this
sign behind his counter: "The man
who trusts Is out"
"A Japanese tailor makes the lin
ing to a garment first, and cuts out the
cloth from it as q pattern.
The oldest national flag In tho
world is that Of Denmark, which has
oeen In use since tho year 1915.
If all the States were as populous
as Massachusetts their age regate popu-
latlon would be |, l,11S,045,O0O.
The house fly of Europe Is said To
oe OF an entirely different species
from the same at1liction of America.
One Western, journal forcibly
characteriZes another as vacillating
as a hea twenty minutes after bed
time"
The London telegraph Office is the
biggest In the world. Over 5000
operators are employed, and upwards
OF 5o,oOO batteries being used.
,-Greenland has no cats. How
thankiul the Greenlanders should be
imagine cats in a country where the
nights are six months long.
Many mon imagine that the world
couldn't get along without them, but
when they die the town in which they
live experiences boom.
Tho man that forgets a great deal
That has happened has better memory
IMAM he who remembers q great deal
that never happened r
Courage is not the absence of fear.
ANY one can do what the world calls n
brave deed If he is not afraid. but II,
takes hero to do it when he is afraid.
"A philosopher who went to a
church where the people came in late.
said 1T was the fashion there for no.
body to go till everybody got there"
"A writer in the London Speaker
declares that the greatest aid to diges-
tlon Is conversation at meals and that
laughter Is almost cure for dyspepsia
1t is proposed to ship Texas cot
ton from San Francisco, Gal, to To-
Hio, Japan, In q japanese steamer.
rms Is new movement in the cotton
trade.
The man who is always pious, but
never pleasant, is probably not much
nearer the kingdom of heaven, than
the man who is always pleasant, but
never pious.
In single district in India, 90
600 people have died of starvation.
spared by the plague, annihilated by
munger. Civilization is sometimes as
cruel as nature.
1T was Martin Luther who said
he who Is not handsome at 20, strong
at 81, educated at 40, and rich at so,
VIII never be handsome, strong, educa-
ted or rich"
=" Is this fast train ?" asked the
travelling man Of the conductor. "Of
course 1T Is, was the reply. 81 thought
so. Would you mind my getting out
to see what it is fast to %
Mrs. Partington, in illustration of
the proverb, a soft answer turneth
away wrath" says, 1t is better to
speak paragorically of a person than
him."
The oldest love letter in the world
is In the British maseum 1t is pro.
posal of marriage for the hand of an
Egyptian princess, and it was made
3,o0O years ago. 1t is in the form of :.
an inscribed brick. -
The British parliament has nass-
ed, during its existence, about q. 600
statutes, of which only about 5000 ara
still in force. Nearly one-half, or 8, 300.
nave been passed during Queen Vic
toria's reign.
Who ever heard of slandering q
bad man? Who ever heard of com.
terfeiting bad note? Slander, as q
rule, is the revenge of coward. t.
Is generally the best people who are
injured in this way.
"A student who had too frequently
asked Tor leave of absence offered as
a reason the necessity of attending
the funeral Of cousin. "Weli, I SUP.
pose you must CO." said the doubling
professor, " but l wish it were nearer
relative"
Some Of the papers are calling
attention to the fact thatpensions have
cost this country $2,000,00O,O0O since
1867. But more than that amount
within the same time has vanished In
the flame and smoke OF connagrations
in the United States.
Fully as important as the matter
OF saving a portion Of ones income for
a rainy day is the matter of maxim
'h" t'"'~ IAN TIL" h