davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
A Queer "Professor."

The state Of things that may result
from the persistent misuse of an hon
orable word is we'll satirized by little
story told by Philadelphia paper. A
train, it says was about to leave a sta
ton when a young man in one of the
cars leaned over the seat Of an elderly
gentleman, shook hands with him, and
said:
"Good-by, Professorv'
"Good-byw said the elderly man, and
the young man went out and the train
moved on. A man who sat in the next
seat eyed the elderly man sharply a
few minutes, and then leaned over and
said to him:
'Kin We do any tricks with cardsT'
mo; never touch a card"
'Mebby ye play the pianny?"
81 know nothing of music, except N
it's relations to mathematics"
The man stared a moment, and then
went on:
oval, ye amt no boxer-I kin see that
by yer build. Mebby ye play pool?"
"Nop
COR SWITCHBOARD?
81 never heard Of that-whatever it
is.''
We'll, say, I've guessed ye this time.
Wonder l didn't think Of it before.
Ye're a meSmerist!'
81 am nothing of the kind"
"Well, I'll give ye up! What is yer
line?"
II am professor of Greek, rhetoric
and ancient history"
"An' ye can't do no tricks, nor play
music, nor hypnertize?
"Of course notp'
The man turned and gazed out of the
window on the opposite side of the car.
AN he calls himself a perfesser" he
said to himself, musingly.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
Navajo Indian Weaving

'In the art of weaving the NavajOs
excel all other Indians in the limits Of
the United States," said r. G. Johns, Of
Santa Fe. "In fnenesS of finish, artis-
tic design and variety of pattern the
Navajo blanket is ahead of any of the
handiwork of the other tribes. They
are clever enough to weave blankets
with the different designs on the oppo-
site sides, but of late years their work
has deteriorated somewhat because Of
the substitution of inferior aniline dyes
bought from the traders for permanent
native dyes formerly used, and also on
account of the yarn got from the same
source, instead of that laboriouSly
twilled by the hands Of the Indians.
They are great at weaving belts, sash
es garters, and saddle girths. The
Navajo woman finds her greatest di-
version in this occupation, and the ac-
ouisition of money is by no means he
chief motive that actuates her In pro
ducing a blanket that is really work
of art, for after wearing it little
while. till the charm of newness is
gone. she will sell it at a price that
doesn't at all compensate for her time
and labor. The wealthiest of the tribe
will weave just as assiduously as their
poorest neighbors, which goes to prove
that they regard it as more in the light
of pastime than toil."-New York Trib-
une
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

A writer in the New Century Review,
discussing the subject from thorough.
| ly pro-Spanish standpoint, entertains
great hope of the early settlement OF
the Cuban trouble. He pays compli-
ment to the patriotism of the Spanish
| people and, unlike other writers, seems
to have no fear for the solvency of the
| Government, but he thinks; 1.-The infer.
ence is reasonable that prospect ex.
lists Of some system Of autonomy in
Cuba, such as will save Spanish honor,
satisfy American sentiment and bring
to an end the prolonged strife that is
running all industries in the island"
Inc writer appears to speak with au-
thority, and we may hope that he has
good reason to predict the settlement OF
the conflict. 1t would be much easier
to. arrange terms of peace if the Span
lSh Government were to take the In
1tiatiVe than it viii be if our Govern
ment is placed in the position of forcing
Spain to give way. To this we may
come eventually, for, as the most con-
servatfve men in the PR sent admins
'AN'HOH oSe dS Clearly as Mr. CleVo
lands advisers saw more than a wear
ago, the fnsurrection cannot be permit
ted to go on for many months. 1t has
degenerated to a mere succession Of
skirmishes that can be prolonged intfed.
nitely by the combatants, and if the
Spanish Government does not end It by
formulating plan suited TO the wishes
of the people of Cuba our Government
must.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
al sequence in his own mental

tcal sequence in his own mental
processes. simultaneously he seemed
to have reached conclusion, for he
replaced the pistols and locked the case.
NO." he said, Il will not do it. He is
a good boy and it is not his fault nor
hers either. She is as good a woman as
ever lived, and 1 am fool"
He spoke now with the decisiveness
he had shown at Horseshoe Bend,
where, as everyone knows. Gen. Jack
son had called him the brayest man in
the army. He was almost cheerful as
he rose and left the house. walking
towards the bluffs, as was his morning
habit, with the light, swinging step he
mad learned on the trail with the Che
rokee friends of his boyhood. He did
not return until II o'clock, and goiTg
straight to his Office he found John
End1cett, his secretary, waiting for him
with formidable bundle of papers.
Use your own judgment, my boy, on
all that will not keep until tomorrow.
l am busy to-day with work that an
not wait"
He passed into his inner rooms as he
said this, and began sorting the papers
in his private pigeonholes. Endicott
could hear him tearing them, but if he
wondered, he asked no questions, and
the Governor kept up his work long
after his usual dinner hour. When he
went home he found what he had ex-
pected. His wife had gone to her
mother, and he never saw her again.
1t is said he wrote her a most affec-
tionate letter, but if he did, nothing he
said in it changed the course of his life
or hers. Nonsense. His heart did not
break" said my grandmother. Why,
all the world heard of him at San ia
cinto. A brave mans heart never
breaks while he has work to do.'
Perhaps she was right At any rate,
there was no tremor in the Governors s
voice as he spoke to her that morning,
riding with his horses head turned to-
ward the old Cherokee trail that led
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
MT. ST. ELIAS.
Its Recent Ascent by Swiss aud italian
Mountaineers.

The ascent of Mt. st. Elias, which
was accomplished by Prince Louis of
Savoy and his associates, demonstrates
the special adaptability of the Swiss
and Italian mountaineers for this class
of work. That a mountain rising the
better part of half a mile above the
summit of Mont Blanc, and in a region
where the snoW-line deScends to within
1000 to 5000 feet of the sea-leveI or
even lower, should have been ascend
ed in first effort is evidence of sur
prising advances that have been made
Of late years in mountaineering craft.
Although by no means rising to the
height of the Karakoram Himalayas
(Pioneer Peak, some $4,000 feet, or of
Aconcagua, or even of the Ibi Galnin
upward of $4,000 feet, Mt. st. Elias
has in its prodigiously extended snow
mantle, and in the hazardous approach
to 1t over the backs of gigantic and
greatly rifted glaciers, certain elements
associated with it which have been
thought to render the mountain one of
the most difficult to climb of any on the
SUI law VI IhC CdA III. 1Ac dlIlluil'|, az
computed by the mercurial barometer
is $1,000 feet, a result surprisingly in
accord with the determination by angle
measurement, of Professor Russell
who obtained "1S, S,1OO, plus or minus q
probable error of 100 feet" Earlier
measurements of the mountall ranged
from less than $4,000 feet (La PerOuse
in 1885 to approximately 1860 fee
(Dall, 1874. 1t is probably safe TO &C
cept the present measurement, wi.icf
places st. Elias-barring a possible ex
cess in favor of the neighboring Mt
Logan-as the second mountain il
point of elevation on the North Amer
lean continent, the place of honor be
longing to the Citaltepetl, the Stal
Mountain-better known as the Peal
of Orizaba-of Mexico, to which The de
examinations Of Heilprin QS9O, aue
roid), Scovell 1881, triangulation), anf
Kaska QS97, mercurial barometer) giI {
$4,000 feet. The non-volcanic nature
Of Mt. st. Elias had already virtually
been determined by Professor Russell
but 1t will be a satisfaction 10 geolo
gists to know that Prince LOUIS stud
les Of the mountain for the four thou
sand feet left untouched by Russell con
firm this investigator general conclu
SiOnS
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

One OF the Chicago Sunday papers
las been discussing the bachelor uues-
ton, or rather has been getting mum.
Der of women to discuss 1T. The mat.
ter has arisen lately apropos of the agt
tatlon in New England against 'bach.
elor politicians" and also of Ella Wheel
er W1lcox's proposition to tax all bache.
lors over 30 for the benefit of spinSers
over 4O. The women who give their
opinions on the subject in the Sunday
papers are all entitled to write Mrs"
peIore their names-a fact which, in
the opinion Of spinsters "over 4O." II
there are any who have reached that.
age, would disqualify them as Jurors in.
the case Bachelors VS.. Spinsters." AS
a jury, however, they bring in a Scotch
verdict Of mot proven" and by so do
Ing will win the gratitude of bachelors
over 3d." One of the ladies, even hints
that there may be good deal of meth
od in the madness of the men in delay
ing to enter upon the delights of matri-
mony under modern conditions, least
wise she would not have the law 90
matchmaking with whip in it's hand"
Miss Lillian Bell, in her recent hook.
has clearly established that man under
30 is raw, unfinished, wearisame
product, who takes himself and otflers
far too seriously. He may be used fo r
waltz, an occasional escort. at1,:. bu
as companion he is insaIifera bic.
Granting Miss Bells concllEsion. II
would seem to be an Injustice to tax
men who persist in renla inings&f1gke I'M
til they become ripe, finished, charming
to the other seX-men who. take moth
ing seriously. To seesr to compel men
to marry while in tlseir green, Adde'S
cent state would saam to be an injury
to the young mem and also to cast a
doubt upon thar power of woman to
charm this gay, brilliant creature into
matrimony.. The man who defers mar
riage untfE 80 or after, however, if we
may believe the ladies now clamor1ng
for his punishment, has become alto
getaer too gay and charming, and pins
9ls faith to the advice of Punch as re-
Igards matrimony--"Don'tr' What the
ladies' will do about it is an interesting
Question, especially for the bachelor
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

taking from it a pair of the long blue
steel dueling pistols of the period,
tried the lc of both, and then look
ing at them, said aloud:
'They are the ones Benton gave me
The same, sir, had the misfortune to
be obliged to use in my difficulty with
my much-respected friend, Gen. Jack
son.
Before he had concluded his uncon-
scious mimicry of Benton's presenta-
ton speech he recognized the fact that
he had caught the solemn pomp of that
statesman's carefully -modulated peri
DDS. The incongruity of the idea grew
upon him, and as he turned one of the
pistols over and over in his hand he
almost smiled at the -er lack Of log
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
TO TURN THE SWITCH.

jacket or guide to movable shaft. The
latter has handle at the top, and
when out of use this folds close to the
dasher and under the top rail- The
other end of the shaft is fitted with a
rearwardly extending arm, to which Is
fixed a shoe pointed at the front end.
In service the handle is pulled toward
the operator. This allows the shaft to
fall and the shoe drops into the groove
of the track, and by pressing the han
die to one side or the other the switch
tongue is turned by the shoe us it slides
along, passing to one side or the other
of the tongue switch at the will of the
operator.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
The Zionist Conference.

The Zionist Conference, recently
held at Basle, Switzerland, was a gath
ering of influential Hebrews who be-
lieve that it is practicable to re-estab-
lish the Jews in Palestine, under some
form of autonomous government tribu-
tary to the Porte. The dream that the
Jews may some time return to Pales
tine is widely cherished among that
people, and of late years a number of
Jewish agricultural colonies have been
establis he'd there. The new plan, in
which DR.. Herzl and Dr. Max Nordau
are leaders, is more ambitious. The
program adopted contempkates the set
ting up of Jewish state in Palestine
through a financial arrangement with
Turkey, and it is proposed to raise a
fund of fifty million dollars in further
ance of the scheme. The conference
next year is to be held at Jerusalem.-
Youths Companion.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
Monkev Ruried with Military HOnors

A pet monkey belonging to Gunners
Mate William Bentley of the naval
academy at Annapolis recently died
and was buried with honors. Six sail
ors acted as pallbearers. Carpenter
John Jones made the coffin. The mon
key was named "Chink." He was pur-
chased by Mr.. Bentley last January at
Rio Janeiro and was a favorite aboard
ship. His death resulted from convul-
sions. caused by eating too freely Of
yellow paint, with which the deck Of
the frigate Santee was being covered.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
New Use for Chewing Gum.

Even gum-chewing may stand one i'm
good stead upon occasion, as a young
woman of Camden, Me-, found during
an ascent of Mount Battle. She wore
a short skirt and it caught on broken
bit of shrubbery and was torn. She
calmly took the gum she was chewing
from her mouth, put the torn parts of
the dress into place and fixed them
there with it. Anybody who has mad
vertently stepped upon a piece of gum
put to less good use will have no diff
Guilty in believing the story.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
On the KInndike.

"There's a lot of shootin' goin' on
over there at Alaska Dicks saloon.
Are the boys hayin' fun with the ten
derfoot that blowed in last night?
Fun nothin'! The boys is shootin'
to kill. They're fightin' like hungry
tigers over a raw onion they happened
to see in that tenderfoots baggage."-
Chicaoo Tribune.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

Electricity now supplies the power
for ringing the chimes in Grace.
Church, New York, and the curfew
hymn is played by an automatic. ar
rangement breaking the current to
huge magnets Connected with, ten bells,
the largest weighing 1900 pounds. Mu-
sic produced by mechanical means is
becoming more popular, in this country,
and orchestrions and self-playing pi-
amos and harps., to, say nothing of
monographs, are. multiplying.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
A Matter of Colors.

"Sister Millie wants to know If you
won't let us take your big awning?
She's going to give porch party to-
morrow night and wants to have it on
the piaZzer."
wants my awning"
"Yep. She would have borrowed the
Joneses', but theirs is blue, you know,
and Miles hair is red."-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

A man in Massapequa, l.. l., has gone
on the roll Of philanthropists by devils
Ing a new plan for dealing with the
surprise party" The surprise rarty,
like the pastoral donation, has been
looked upon as one of those mysterious
dispensations of Providence that, like a
visitation of locusts, must be accepted
as irresistible, endured with becoming
humility and received with praise be-
cause il does not come more than once
in a season. But the MasSapequa man,
perhaps from confusing the facts,
adopted a different method. When the
hilarious surprise party, male and fe-
male, gleesomely pounded upon his
front door, he came to the door with a
gun. The women shrieked and fed,
and the men. from behind trees, tried
to convince the unwilling host that
they were not white caps or tramps or
robbers. But the man with the gun
had his doubts, and it was only after a
long parley that the visitors were ad-
ukted to the house. Perhaps 1t was q
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

A tourist who, has been looking over
Daniel Webster's big farm at Marsh
field. Mass. found but one person who
was acquainted with the statesmen. A
former superintendent of the farm still
survives, and relates how he drawe the
oxen past Webster's window IN order
to crafty the dying mans desire to see
them once more. The old superintend-
ent denies that Webster was a hard
drinker, and insists that the only trou-
BILE was that ''he did not have as much
money as he needed
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

weak surrender. But the guns muzzle
is like the opening to a path of deliv-
erance for those similarly afflicted, and
the closed door is like a door Of hope to
all sufferers from like siege. 1t may
De necessary yet to add to invitations
TO surprise parties: 'Please bring re-
freshments and bullet proof coats"
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

To work worthily man must aspire
worthily. His theory of human attain
ment must be lofty. 1t must ever be
lifting him above the low plain of GUS
tom and convention in which the senses
confine him into the high mount Of
vision and renovating ideas.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

The New York Sun has a ntural Curl
osity to learn where Spain gets the
money to continue the Cuban war. To
be sure. it is a deep mystery, and well
worth probing, but it fades into insig-
nificance before the query where Spain
would get the money for a difficulty"
with the United States, about which
Its statesmen love to hint darkly.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
Gold niscoxerer Hanged.

The first man who discovered gold in
Australia was hanged for his pains.
He was one of the first convicts trans
ported to Botany Bay, and when he
learned the great secret he brought a
sample to show his success, and was
promptly hanged by Gov. Phillip for
attempted escape and to keep the de-
moralizlng discovery unknown.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

Not every American girl has the. good
luck of Miss Julia Chaplin, of New
York, who got divorce from a titled
European rascal and married an Amer
ican gentleman.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
Thought So.

"What is that cigar-box arrangement
on top of the houseY' asked the guest
from the city.
THAT" said the proud owner of his
own suburban home, sis a watch
tower"
ooh! 1 thought it was too small for z
clock tower."-Cincinnat Enquirer.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

A relic just acquired by the Paris
Military Museum is the wood and iron
leg of Gen. Daumesnil, who lost one of
his own legs at Wagram and replaced
It with a contrivanee Of timber and
iron springs. When the General at
later day was summoned to surrender
fort near Paris his reply was, "Give
me back my leg andsyou can have Vim
eennes." The old Napoleonic veteran
survived until 1882.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

1t is estimated that in one city, Chi
cago, the coin1in-the-slot machines are
devouring. more than two million dol
lprs year. There are two kinds of
the machines: Those that have a slot
for petty gambling operations, an Il
those that are supposed ALWAYS to give
something in return for the slot invest
ment. Those who put money in the
gambling; slot take their chances Of get
ting something out, and the makers and
buyers OF the machines take cana that
these chances are none too good. Those
who drop coins in ostensibly vending
slots are not gamblers, but they are fire.
quently dupes; the continuance swaI-
lows the coin, yields. nothing worth
having, and seems to ask, ''What are
you going to do about itT There Is
practically no choice between them,
and both classes of slot machines
should be avoided by all save million
aires, and outlawed by the State,
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

The woman who waltzed herself to
death furnishes the dancing professors
with another strong argument in their
crusade against the waltz. There is no
record of anybody ever dancing them
selves to death in the redowa.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
SWITCH-TURNsNG DEVICE.

Street Rail Switch May Be Manfpu-
lated from the Car Platform.
A very simple device by which .
street rail switch may be manipulate
ed from the. car platform was recently
patented by John HI. Boyer, of Phila-
delphia. The invention consists of a
small upright guide fastened to the
dasher of the car, which acts rs q
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

There are several tunnels under the
Thames, one under the Hudson at New
York is more than half completed, and
one to be built under the Danube at
Buda-Pesth will be vestibuled by cleo
trio machinery. The projected tunnel
under the Irish Channel, to connect
Great Britain with the north of Ire
land, will probably be put through
within the next decade.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

Since those Yukon steamers have not
yet brought down the millions with
which they were loaded-by the CORE
spondents-there must be more gold up
there than was predicted.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

across the Mississippi through Arkan-
sas to the Indian Territory.
Good morning, Mrs. Tupton," he
said as he bowed to my grandmother.
'It is beautiful day, and your roses
are almost beautiful enough to be
worthy Of you."-Utica Globe.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18
Theory.

Weary Watkins-Ain't it funny some
mon can't work till they are full Of
booze?
Dismal Dawson-I don't see nothin'
funny about it. Amt man got to
drown his misery Indianapolis jour
nal
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

The theory of the European rulers is
that it's all right to talk eloquently for
peace, so long as the armies and navies
are kept in proper fighting trim,
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

Football has some advantages over
baseball, for when the players want
to roast the umpire there's the "grid-
iron.'
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

A Klondike club of women have
hired a man to go along and do their
cooking. No terrors can daunt the
Klondike woman.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

Minister Woodford must have disap-
pointed some of the jingo journals by
not slapping the Queen of Spain in the
face.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

The action of the dancing masters in
tabooing the waltz is direct blow at
the theory that one good turn deserves
another,
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

Montana produced 81 ,53O,O13 pounds
Of wool this year ,and leads all other
States as a wool grower.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

Gen. Weyler may be putting down
he revolution, but he isn't putting up
very much of a fight.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

When a girl thinks she is awfully
sweet, she finds it difficult to keep the
opinion to herself.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

Water is so scarce at BroomtowH,
Ala. and vicinity that farmers have to
haul it a distance of three and foslf
miles.
The Winslow mail., 1897-12-18

The amount of air inspired in TWEEN
ty-four hours is about 10000 quarts
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1897-11-11
Weight of Pigs MT Btrth.

What is the weight of a pig at birth ?
At the Oklahoma experiment station a
litter of five pure-bred Poland-China
pigs from yearlirg sow averaged 20
pounds the day of birth. When seven
days old they averaged 40 pounds. Five
from an older grade Poiand-China sow.
out of a litter of seven, two having died,
averaged 2.75 pounds at day of birth
and SO pounds when seven days old.
Nine Duroc-Jersey pigs, two others
having died, from two-year-old Duroc-
Jersey SOW, averaged 2.44 pounds when
One day old, 4.7s pounds when seven
and 5.57 pounds when Is days old, two
pigs having been lost in the meantime.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1897-11-11
LIVE STOCK POINTERS,

Feed cattle by cutting up the shocked
ccrn. 1t is economical.
The hog that quietly eats and keeps
on eating is the hog for profit.
Food wisely fed Will always come
back doubled if fed to good animal.
Defective eyesight is often a cause
of shying, and the whip will not help
that, will it?
One ounce of Scotch snuff to a pound
of grease makes good application for
Ice on cattle.
Shorts, corn and oats, with some oil
meal, will keep the fall pig growing
during the winter.
Stopping pigs through the summer
IS good thing. Hogs can be brought
&c the fattening or finishing period on
alfalfa alone
1t is hardly practical to feed an ex-
actly balanced ration. Come as near
to it as possible, under ordinary man
agement, and let it go at that.
Lice and worms are the hogs great
enemies. When changing hogs from
one feed to another it should be done
with some care, as well as with other
animals.-Western Plowman