Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1897-07-10
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doesn't look a bit like them. Detroit
Journal.
Yes" said Uncle Jonas, that boy O.
mine allus wus fond o books. an now
he's becom' a page In the legislature
Philadelphia American.
Quericus-Do you know why this is
often called a cold world? Cynicus-
To distinguish it from the next, l sup
pose.-New York Journal
Roberts Harry fond of female so
ciety? Richard-Immoderately. I've
known him to play whist with three
women.-Boston Transcript,
Did you read that magazine article
on The Working of Bank?' " mo. Is
it by an ex-bank president or an ex-
burglar?"- Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Turks seem to have a mighty
poor opinion of the Greeks" Yes;
that accounts for them running 'em
down. "-Cleveland Plaindealer.
"Chngstone never takes any interest
in euchre unless diamonds are trumps."
why is that?" He is a baseball
crank. louisville Courier-Journal.
Few men have any trouble in meet
ng their creditors" says the Manayunk
Philosopher, but they do have trou-
bic in lodging them. '-Philadelphia
Record.
He-I must have a kissforevery cara
mel. dear. She-Some men would have
bought a whole box instead of that
measley little paper bag full-Detroit
Free Press.
Julia, have you bought new spring
suit YETI" mo, I'll have to wait until
next month; Dick had to buy a new
spring gun and two new spring fishing
rods this month"
He-Just listen how that hen cackles!
She doesn't know how little one egg
will sell for. She-Perhaps she does.
She may be advertising a bargain
Somerville Journal.
Mrs. Jones-Wake up, John! There's
someone trying to get into the house!
Jones-How do you know? Mrs. Jones
The dog has stopped bowling. Hurry,
John.-New York Journal.
Mr.. Crimsonbeak-I don't believe a
man ever stole anything but he lived
to regret it. Mrs. Characterization
stole my heart once, John. Mr.. Grim
Standardization Statesman.
"Joe got the inside track of his wife
this year" What did he do?" He
read her a whole lot of newspaper
stories of men who had dropped dead
beating carpets. Detroit Free Press.
Kerrigan--Phat's good fer cowld?
Casey-Hov yez got tn proice Nv two
hot WHISTLES about yez? Kerrigan-Oi
HOY not. Casey-Will, thin, Kerrigan,
ut wud be a mercy not t tell yeZ.-
Puck.
Walker Farr-I thought your next
tour was to have been through South
Africa. Count d'Ties-It was, but the
company struck. One Of them had
read that an ostrich egg often weighs
a dozen pounds.-Puck.
Amanda (alighting from her wheel at
the roadside, where Mortimer awaits
her)-Have l kept you waiting long,
dear? Mortimer-Long? Many cycles
have passed since the hour appointed
for our meeting.-Judge.
"You see, 1t was this way: They
were all three so dead in love with her
and all so eligible that to settle the
matter she agreed to marry the one
who should guess the nearest to her
ha LIMO
know she married the one who guess
ed the west."-Pearson's Weekly.
A hereditary liar: Mrs. Jackson
OATS sebenteen lies yo's tole me toe
day, oil diffrunt. Yo' am regular rap
skillion. 'Rastus Jackson-W- whad
am a rapskillion, nanny? Mrs. Jack
SOMA rapskillion am young 'un OATS
got his ladders blood in him-dat's
whad rapskillion am.-Judge.
"You don't mean to tell me you have
gone and got engaged to two women
at once?" Eyes, but 1t really amounts
to only one ngagement-half an en-
gagement for each girl" "Will you
please explain" "Why, certainly.
Each of 'em is engaged to another fell
low."-Cincinnati Commercial Tribune.
A vindication: 81 don't understand
why you dislike Herbert SO" said Ma
bel to her father. 81 don't think he has
any ideas of finance" 81 am sure you
wrong him. He is devoted to 1t. He
stopped right In the middle of his pro-
posal to me to ask how your business
was getting along. "-Washington Star.
Mrs. Commensurate (soberly)-Are
you sure your fancee will make good
home-body, Eli? Do you think she
knows anything about mending for In
stance? Cholly Commonstalk-About
mending, mother? Why, that is her
very strongest point. l saw her mend