The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1897-01-21
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

--Laura's Dear Friends. - Irene
Laura Kajones's face looks dreadfully
pinched." 81 don't know about that,
but know her feet do" - Chicago
Tribune.
When Eli Perkins, the lecturer, was
making a tour OF the west, he said he
was travelling for his wife's pleasure
"Then your wife is with your" suggest
ed some one. "Oh. no." said Eli, shes
in New York"
--Widow-"Do you know. Mr.. Caller,
that you remind me very much of my
late husband?" MIR. Caller docking at
watch) -"Why. it is late, isn't itP Ex-
cuse me. really had no idea OF the
time. '-Richmond Dispatch.
Numerous are the people who have
"buildcd better than they knew" A
small boy in one of the public schools
was asked to define demagogue. "a
demagogue," he said. lis a vessel that
holds wine, gin, whisky or any other
liquor. '-liangor News.
First Yale Student - "IIave you
telegraphed to the old man for money!
EDtCohb lSos wv diI
answer" Yes. telegraphed the old
man: Where is that money | wrote
for?' and his answer reads: In my in
side pocket "~-Texas Siftings.
--Irene--"Isn't it curious how inno-
cent George Ferguson is? They say
he never kissed anybody in his life, and
doesn't know how to kiss" Laura
49, l., Il To
has-that is-why, l should think he
would know how by this time."-Chi-
rago Tribune.
"A tall fellow persisted in standing
during the performance at the theater.
much to the annoyance of the audience,
and was respectfully requested to sit
down, but would not; when voice
from the upper gallery called out:
let him alone, honey; he's q
tailor, and he's resting himself" He
dropped into a seat.
Learned Mnemonics.-Prof. A
''Do you know, find it difficult to re.
member the ages of children!" Prot
B.-"I have no such trouble! ! was
born 1900 years after Socrates; my
wife $500 years after the death OF
TiberiuS Caesar; our son John 1900
years after the entrance into Rome OF
Titus Sempronius Gracious for the re-
enactment of the 'leges Liciniae, and
cur Amanda 800 years after the begin
ming of the Folk-wandering-tha is
perfectly simple, you ee."-Fliegende
Blaetter.
Apple Compote.-Pare the apples
cut the cores out, leaving them whole
make IA syrup, allowing three-fourths
of pound of sugar TO pound Of fruit
when it comes to "a boil put in the apples
| and let cook until tender, but they
should remain whole. Remove the
| apples to a glass bowl, and dissolve one
third of a box of gelatine in a half-cupfu
of hot water and stir briskly into tn,
syrup, first taking off the fire. Their
strain it over the apples. When cold
heap whipped cream over it. This
makes very presentable dish for tee
or -Ilousekeeper.
Cracked Sandwiches.-A savory
baA'"Ni 10 iiohi
unsw eetened crackers, spread with &
paste made from three tablespConfuIs
Oh Roquefort cheese, a tablespoonful OF
butter and q teaspoonful of pars
ley chopped very fine. Serve viii
q green salad, or lay each on a crisI
lettuce leaf before serving. Water
crosses mixed with the yolks of hard
boiled eggs also make an appctizinG
mixture with which to make sand
witches of brown bread. Season thu
paste with little olive oil, vinegar an,
paprika. Cut the bread for all sand
witches thin" though not new, is N
often forgotten njunction.-N. Y
Evening Post.