davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

Mrs. WinsloW's Soothing syrup
For children teethnR the reduces fnha m
alAys pain, wind collie IS cents bottle
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

Sbe-''So you don't like the hat Just in
front Of us. How would you like II
trimmedr'
He (savagelyl-"with a lawn mower
T1t-BttA
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

Don't miss the corn roast at Loyelant
Monday. September 9Th.
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

The average height of the Scotch is about
flye feet ten Inches.
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

fs Cure Constipation Forever.
Take CaScarets Candy Cathhrtic. lOc or Na
u q @. O. tAtl to cure, druggists refund money
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

The hags used by the navy have 10
endure frost and snow, rain storms and
h,azing suns. and therefore great care
u exercised in the choice Of goods and
coloring and many testing devices are
used before choice is made of cloth.
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04
OUR BUDGET OF FUN
SOME GOOD JOKES. ORIGINAL
AND SELECTED.

he Colorsd Indsvidaars Excuse Or tho
Eject Of soieatiao Research on Rsrsi,
Chicken Cosps-A Legal Lanissry-'
Midsummer Rest.
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

Ns-TS- Aas for Fifty CentA
Nen stroeG, blood pure. bOc 81 All druggists
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

There are four miilionsires In Englasd Il
me In FraAes.
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

It is the boast of the department that
the workers turn out hags better made
than those obtainable in any other po--
tion Of the globe. Not only are Amer
ican flags made but flags of all nations,
for each warship is required to be fit-
ted out with nag Of every nation
which sends ships upon the sea. James
Crimmins. the foreman, knows more
about flags than any one else in the
world. He weighs the bunting, tests
| the colors, measures the stripes, cuts
the cloth, carves out the stars and in
srects the sewing.
The department reserved for the
| measurement of the flags resembles
gigantic tennis court only in place of
white lines the floor is inlaid with
strips and plates of brass. The meas
urements of the flags must be perfect.
The floor is SO good and SO large that
| the semi-monthly balls of the officers
stationed at the Brooklyn yards are
held in the room.
Some OF the women who sew the
flags together have worked for fifteen
years. Machinery and electricity have
done away with the necessity OF sew
ing the fiags by hand. but the women
who sew on stars are expert needle
| women. certain number Of stitches
is allowed to one inch and only care
full hands can do the work. Cutting
out the white stars is interesting 10
< watch. The foreman folds the cloth
twenty times, places a metal star on
the pile and marks the pattern. Then
with chisel and mallet he cuts out a
whole shower of stars at once.
& The flags used by the navy have 10
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04

Mike d New Arrived-And whore air
~ rum?
Pat-Dublin.
Mike-D'ye know Dennis O'LAsyf
Pat-Faith, an Oi'm his brotAsr.in
law.
Miks-Surs. Oi thought OF ssv Q re.
DoAblanee.
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04
W.. IAex.r. ~

Whsa TAsy'Pe DsssoAna
Soxsy-Why are thoss tAin0 that
widow wear SalIsA "veeAa~f
knoxey-bssasss they sDglne up
and choke ~ gFtsf.-PsttooWg WSvH
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04
M, lala-s,um.r Rest.

GAIN the happy
time 10 here
When souls with
work distresaei 4.
Enjoy. with naugii {
to interfere.
Their glad vaca-
tion rest.
From all his cares.
the city drudge.
Will HE himself
away.
And eighty sew, II
miles will trudgs
The Meeker herald., 1897-09-04
WA u sASvs.

VisitorCTAs natives down here cont
ssen to b very ambitious,
osorEisA-Doat, sA? Yoa'd oaght-
- - one whsa gresnbottJs ~ hgAts
o. the back Of his neek.-FAiIaAsaDAi
North American.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
SMeening With Air.

One of the greatest aids to the mod
ern housekeeper Is the pneumatic
sweeper. This surprising new inven-
tion, which nobody seems to claim thu
honor of having discovered, and which
is, therefore, open to all manufactur-
ers, relegates the broom to the garret
and takes the place Of the mechanical
carpet sweeper, which few years ago
was thought to be perfection.
All that is necessary to fit the pneu-
matte sweeper to any hotel or private
house is pipe connection for COM
pressed aiI. When pneumatic sweep
ers have completely won their way
pneumatic tubes may be carried into
every house from main in the street,
as is now done with gas and water.
With such connection tho whole
house could be cleaned from cellar to
garret in few hours and the labor of
several servants could be dispensed
with. The pneumatic sweeper can be
applied to busting the furniture.
The new sweeper consists simply Of
long nozzle attached to the end Of
rubber hose. The nozzle is about the
same size as broom handle.
One end of this pipe is inserted
into the rubber house, and the other
carries q brass arrangement about
foot in width across the face. Here
there is narrow slit running from
side to side, and not more than 1872
of an inch in width.
Through this narrow aperture the
compressed air is forced at the rate Of
seventy-five cubic feet a minute. The
household using the pneumatic sweep
ee passes it back and forth over the
surface of the carpet.-New York
Herald
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
Grants Game of Mumble-the-Pes.

"A favorite game with the boys OF
John D. Whites subscription school,
at Georgetown, was mumble-the-peg.
Grant couldn't play the game very skill
fully, and the peg always got a few
clandestine licks every time he was to
pull it." says McClure's Magazine. "On
one occasion 1t was driven in so deep
that the boys thought Lys could never
get 1t out. He set to work with his
forehead down in the dirt, the sun beat
ing hot upon him. and the crowd Of
boys and girls shutting out every
breath of fresh air. The peg would not
move. The red-faced, shock-headed,
thickset boy, with his face now all over
mud, had forgotten his comrades. and
saw only one thing in the world-that
was this stubborn peg. The bell rang.
but the boy did not hear 1t. A minute
later, after final effort he staggered to
his feet with the peg in his mouth. The
old schoolmaster was in the door OF the
schoolhouse, with his long beech switch
the only person to be seen. There
was glee inside at this new develop
ment-here was fun the boys had not
counted on. Imagine their surprise
when, as the boy came closer. ana the
stern old schoolmaster saw his face, ne
set down the switch inside the door
and came outside. One boy slipped to
the window and reported to the rest.
The old man was pouring water on
Lys Grants hands and having him
wash his face. He gave him his red
bandanna to wipe it dry. What the
school saw a minute later was the
schoolmaster coming in, patting this
very red and embarrassed boy on the
head"
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
A Thought Weighing Machine.

The cerebrum is the organ of the
will and it is known that in the exer-
else of its function there is an increased
supply of blood to that part. Profess
sor Mosso, an Italian psychologist, has
invented thought weighing machine,
consisting of delicate balances SO con-
trived that they weigh the varying
amount of blood in the brain. The
activity of the brain is in direct pro.
portion to the amount of blood there
in. According to local newspaper
report, the machine is so delicately
constructed that it readily detects the
difference in the exertion required to
read Greek above that necessary to
read Latin. Every youngster is ready
to believe in the machine. Medical
Record.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08

Cambridge, Mass, is indignant
justly it would seem to Harper's
Weekly, because the Postoffice De-
partment declines to recognize it's OK
istence officially except as "Station F,
Boston" The city ordered the other
day of the Government some thou.
sands of stamped envelopes on which
was to be printed the notice to return,
if not delivered to City Hall, Cam
bridge, Massachusetts. Word came
back that the printing would not be
done as ordered, but the letters would
be made returnable to Station r, Bos-
ton. OF course Cambridge was indig
nant. 1t got its envelopes and had
them printed privately to its own taste,
and now its Citizens Trade Associa-
ton is on the war path, and its Con-
gresham has been notified to make
trouble. Harvard University, as loca-
ted by the Postofiioe printer, is at
"Station F, Boston,"
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08

1t is true the settlement OF the West
and Northwest has been largely by
immigrants from foreign countries,
but these immigrants have been of the
best kind. The class OF immigrants
who find it to their taste to drift into
the slums OF the large cities have never
come west OF Chicago in large num-
bers, says the Sioux City Qowa) Jour
nal. The Germans, French, Dutch,
English, Scotch, Scandinavians and
Irish, who have gone upon farms of
the West to make homes for them
selves, or have built up the small
towns and Aourishing young cities of
the West, have been intelligent and
we'll educated, and they have come to
the United States with fixed purposes
and sensible plans. The fact that the
undesirable immigrants are filling up
the cities of the East and driving
Americans westward is sufficient cause
for alarm-in the East. 1t is this fact
that gives to the movement for greater
restrictions on immigration SO much
force. 1t is not desirable that we
should receive fewer immigrants, but
1t is desirable that those immigrants
should be of better class.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
Another Palace of Hay.

Toronto, Ont, will have to step back
with its palace Of hay. One of our
boys who lives in Sollitt, ILL.,, read the
paragraph published last week about
Torontos scheme for such a building
at the coming exposition, and he sat
right down and wrote that the plan
wasn't new at all. Here's part Of his
letter:
About five years ago such a palace
was built, and stood as erected for two
years within fifty miles Of Chicago, at
the town of Momence, where it was WIS.,
tied by large crowds daily, the baled
hay being taken from the Kankakee
swamps. 1t was handsomely decorated
with grains and ornamental grasses OF
all kinds.-John S. Elliott"
Hurrah for Momence-our boys and
girls will stand up for her and her pal
ace Of hay.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08

open. Miss Ritter ran to a crooked
tree and managed to climb to fork in
the tree. twelve feet above the ground.
The bear stopped to eat the contents Of
her lunch basket. while she screamed
Justify for help. In her efforts to get
higher Miss Ritter's clothing became
fast in broken limb. The bear made
no effort to climb the tree, but kept the
school teacher in the tree nearly three
hours, when a farmer, Mr.. Shurk, came
along. The bear fed and the farmer
climbed up into the tree and helped
her down. Once on the ground Miss
Ritter tainted and Mr.. Shurk carried
her to the nearest farmhouse, mile
away.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08

We found Wilson sitting on the
edge of his bunk, in his shirt sleeves,
His shirt was soaked with blood, and
there was big hole in his right
breast. His rifle lay.on the floor be-
side the bunk. He had taken off his
right shoe and pulled the trigger with
his great toe. He was very white in
the face, but smiling.
"Well," he said in low voice, as
we stopped over to examine him,
"you fellows can cit around the stove
and have something to talk about on
rainy afternoons now. But it's all
right-all right"
Just then the young naval officer
pushed through the crowd of US
around the bunk. When he caught
sight of his brothers face he reeled,
and one of us had to catch him to pre-.
vent him from falling.
"Jackl Oh, my Godl" was all the
young fellow with the silver anchor
could say. 1t was easy for us fellows
standing aronnd to see how his heart
was aching under his blouse.
'It's all right, Ed., all right" We
all sneaked away then. Well, no, I
can't say that any of us felt very hill.
arious just then for fact.
The little lieutenant of our battery
went in. In few minutes he came
out, just almost carrying the young
naval officer, man about twice as
big as he was.
We all volunteered for the firing
party, and the four young wind-push-
ers who trumpeted for the batteries
quarreled over which OF them should
blow "taps" over the grave. We'd all
spent many an afternoon cleaning our
guns after firing volleys who had
passed from our outfit over the divide,
but that certainly was the-well, the
breakingest-up funeral that Candy
ever saw. Wilson's brother was there,
in full dress. But the name that was
printed by the post painter on
Wilson's headstone was not Will
son. 1t was the same Eame as
that of the young naval officer. The
cemetery at Candy is only couple of
hundred feet from the roaring sea. In
a few weeks two ladies, one quite old
and white haired, the other young,
pretty, but sad looking, came to Can.
by in mourning. They had "Wilson's"
body sent somewhere back to the
States.
1t was long time before we got at
the inside of the story. Then we
found out that "Wilson" had gotten
his commission at West Point and had
resigned year after his graduation
on account Of some difficulty. He had
shipped in the navy as bluejaoket.
After his first cruise he had been
drafted to ship on which his broth
er, who had meanwhile graduated
with distinction at Annapolis, was
serving as watch and division officer.
The humiliation OF it had been too
much for him, and "Wilson" had
promptly deserted. Then we got him.
He had probably been meditating
suicide for long time, and the final
sight of his brothers face in suoh an
off-the- earth place as Fort Candy
wrought upon him as the working OF
a fate that seemed to be crushing.
Thus the rife ball. We did not talk OF
him around the stove at all. But his
gun was taken out OF the rife rack and
slowed away out Of sight. Washing
ton Star.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08

The reasons for the interest with
which the plans for Pacific cable are
watched in England are not altogether
political or strategical, says the New
York Post. The possible diversion of
cable traffic from nm old submarine
system to q new is indicated in some
figules given in London Mt the last
meeting of the eastern Extension"
Company, one of the greatest of the
enterprises to which Sir John Pender
gave hts thought. The gross revenue
is about 50, 1000, 900 year; the work
ing expenses run only about 5000, 900
N year Discussing the prospects of
Pacific cable competition, the Marquis
of Tweedale said that the loss of the
Eastern Extention business might
range from 100000 to 1880, 900 q
year. He hardly expected such ad-
verse conditions, however, and mean
time the new rival cables had not been
laid. As to the possibilities of an
augmented cable traffic at the anti
podes and with China and Japan, it
appeared that an increase of $3.50, 900
in the last half-year had sprung almost
entirely from the activity in yves.
tralian" gold mining. AS regards the
stability of the English submarine
cable enterprises, it may be noted
that the Eastern Extention property
is valued at premium of $40, 900, 900
on its capital value, and the allied
Eastern Telegraphs at about $40, 600, :
900 more over the capital value.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
The Hartford Conn Courant te,,

The Hartford Conn Courant tells
q story of Yale in the old days. The
boys used to bribe the printers
"devils" to get proofs of the examina-
tion papers for them. When the coll
lege authorities put stop to this
practice q bright idea seized one fellow
and he saved the whole suffering party.
He hired one of the printers lit was
summer) to wear pair OF white
trousers to the Office, and at noon to
sit down on the "form" in which were
locked the precious questions. The
inky seat of that pair of trousers sold
for a deal more than the clothes were
worth in their original spotlessness,
and relief was assured.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
Starving Out Education.

In the province of Guadalajara there
are something over $50 schoolmasters
whose individual salaries do not reach
500 pesetas per annum. The school OF
Canamares receives an annual grant
of 46 pesetas ($S, roughly. In spite
OF this scale Of payment, the depart
ment Of education owes the schools
and teachers Of this single province
$4,000 pesetas. And the schoolmast-
ers Of Velez-M Malaga, literally at the
point of starvation, have addressed a
piteous circular, imploring aid, to the
sovereigns and heads of other states,
including the president of the French
republic.-North American Review.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
Horses with Wheels"

"It was In the early days of railroad
ing in the SOUTH" remarked the gentle
man with the stock Of "reminiscences
the other day. 81 was located In Flor
ida about the time when the govern
ment had made vassals Of the Seminole
Indians Of that state, and In order 10
impress the redoubtable Billy Bowlegs,
the Tecumseh of the Seminoles, 1t hao
Invited that heap big chieftain' to
make trip to the seat Of the national
government. Billy was bit dubious
about accepting the invitation, fearing
possibly that the Great Father at Wash
lngton might have designs upon his life
,r happiness, but he was prevailed upon
TO make the trip and he embarked on
Of courage. The trains of that period
were not the flyers of to-day; in fact,
on many Of the short lines engineers
were compelled to get out Of their cabs
and walk to tighten the train and per-
NIT 1t to proceed at an even rate OF
speed. When Billy Bowlegs returned
from his visit he had overcome his
trepidation and looked with scorn up
On the locomotive. ! visited Billy a
day or two after his return and asked
him how he liked travelling on the iron
horse.
Huh" he said. with an upward
twist Of his prominent proboscis, horse
wild wheels no good. Big heap no good.
Me on horse better than two; run way
all time. White man heap smart; In
Jun heap better. Huh! New Orleans
Times-Democrat.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
WHEN THE WINTER SUN IS LOW

When the winter sun Is low
And the wind through waving trees,
Flinging frost doth hurrylng go.
Moaning like the moaning sea;
Through the fields bereft Of cheer
Sad l walk and dream OF thee
All were sweet If thou vert here;
Love, why com'st thou not to me?
When the winter moon Is high,
And the blast across the void
Bloweth from the northern sky
Where the stars are glistening cold,
Der the signing fells alone
Sad walk and dream of thee
Sorrow never maketh moan,
o, my love, when thou'rt with me.
When the stars wax faint and white,
And gray dawn begins to shake
Through the skies her dappled light,
From my restless couch | wake;
Then my soul flies out to thee,
Swift to thee, her own sweet choicel =
All! why com'st thou not to me,
With the healing Of thy voice?
Through the fields walk In woe,
For thy smile is fur away;
And the tears In secret flow,
Sorrows rain, from day to day.
oh, my sweetheart, oh my own,
Why should space or place divide
Hearts that God hath made as one2
Thee claim, my heaven sent bride!
ID. ]. Donahoe, In Donahoe's Magazine.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
Bear Stops Schoolma'am.

Some days ago Lucretia Ritter, teach
er of school in the Elk Lake district.
Sullivan county, had thrilling expert
ence with a black bear, says the New
York Press. Her school is in q sparsely
settled part of the county, and the road
from her boarding place runs through
a mile of dense woods. When walking
along through the woods she saw what
she thought was yearling calf in the
path. She shook her lunch basket at
the beast to see 1t scamper. 1t didn't
scamper. She found that 1t was not
calf but full-grown black bear The
bear ghcE.-i = ..... :, her, with mouth
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
A SKELETON EXPOSED.

The new woman orator waxed elo.
quent.
''And what" she demanded, as she
came to the climax, sis to be the re.
suit Of our emancipationP"
She looked around with the calm
assurance of one who had asked
poser, and this was too much for the
little man who was waiting for his wife
in far corner of the hall.
II know" he shouted.
"Ah," returned the new woman on
the platform, scornfully, "the little
man with the bald head thinks he has
solved the problem that we came here
to discuss this afternoon. We will
gladly give our attention while he
tells us what is to be the result"
''Oold dinners and ragged children"
roared the little man.-Chicago Post.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
AN EXPLANATION.

Benevolent Gentleman Indignantly
-"You're fraud. You told me the
other day you wouldn't be begging
but for your wife and two children,
and learn from the police that your
wife has been dead long time, and
that your two children are grown up
and in good circumstances.
Beggar-"Indeed, told you moth.
ing but the truth, sir. l wouldn't be
begging, as l said, but for my wife
and two children. My wife sup
ported me till she died, and my two
children might support me, but they
won't. l wouldn't want to be begging
with lie on my tongue. ."-Trulb.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
The Cars Horses and Carriages.

The Czar of Russia has four sepa.
rate Services" of horses and carriages |;
namely, the Russian, French, English
and gala sets. Each set comprises at
least fifty horses. The Russian set
accompanies the Emperor wherever he
goes, and at Gatchina it is used, to.
gether with the English set.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
A Rough Diamond.

Walking down the street we saw two
very ragged boys with bare toes, red
and shining, and tattered clothes upon
which the soil Of long wear lay thick
and dingy. They were few and far
between"-only jacket and trousers
and these solitary garments were very
unneighborly, and objected to a union,
however strongly the autumn wind
hinted at the comfort of such an ar
rangement. One of the boys was per-
fectly jubilant over half-withered
bunch of flowers some person had cast
away. Il say, Billy, warn't somebody
real good to drop these ere posies jest
where l could find 'em, and these SO
pooty and nice? Look sharp, Billy,
and may be you'll find some bimeby-
o, jolly! Billy, If dere amt most half
a peach, and tain't much dirty neither.
Cause you amt got no peach, you may
bite first. Bite bigger, Billy, may be
We'll find another fore long"
That boy was not cold, nor poor, and
never will be; his heart will keep him
warm, and If men and women forsake
him the very angels will feed him and
fold their wings about him. Bite
bigger, Billy, may be We'll find another
fore long" What hopeful little soul!
If he finds his unselfishness lily repaid,
he will not turn misanthrope, for God
made him to be man, one to bear his
own burdens uncomplainingly, and help
his fellows besides.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08

A Boston jury recently decided that
yankee Doodle" was not fit tune
for Sunday concert, and now objeo-
ton is being made by the New Eng
land Sabbath Protection League to q
Sunday performance of Rossini's ora
torio, "Moses in Egypt"
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08

The salt industry of Utah is grow
ing rapidly. Five years ago not over
twenty carloads OF refined, or, as
commonly called, commercial salt,
were sold annually to outside points
by Utah men, says the San Francisco
Examiner. Now the business is about
1900 cars of refined salt annually.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1897-02-08
FoRaor HE WAS IN IT.

The palm for absent mindedness is
probably taken by learned German,
whom Berlin comic paper calls Pro-
iessor Dusel, OF Bonn. One day the
Professor noticed his wife placing
large bouquet on his desk. "What
does that mean 2" he asked.
"Why |" she exclaimed, "don't you
know that this Is the anniversary Of
your marriageT
"Ah, indeed, is itP" said the Pro-
fessor, politely. 'Kindly let me know
when yours comes around, and will
reciprocate the favor. ."-Pittsburg
Bulletin.