Emmons County record. [volume] (Williamsport, D.T. [i.e. N.D.]) 1884-current, 1897-06-11
ITEMS OF INTEREST.

Mandan people are getting civilized
and insist that cattle and. horses he kept
out of the cemetery.--Jamestown Capital.
A New Jersey man who commenced
using tobacco when he was small boy,
has lost all his teeth, cannot hear well and
his eyes.are failing. The afflicted gentle
man is only 1876 years old.
''It you love your wife buy her gas
stove," says an advertisement in the
Grand Forks papers. What for-to CON-
vert her suddenly into an angel. Better
buy her 'Blue Flame OIL stove and let
her llves
The fools s5s re- not 4 gil dead s an
newspaper the other M day % and discover discovered i
an advertisement headed, t.How to Make
Pants Last" He sent fifty cents for In
slructions, and IN due time received the
followings Make the coat and vest
first" At last acrounts the simpleton
was trying to recover his money by legal
process.
Minnesota newspapers, says the st.
Thomas FINES, are now supplying their.
readers with copies OF the session laws in
supplement form. furnished and paid for
by the state. North Dakota cfliAtns have
the privilege of paying dollar for a
copy OF the laws passed by the last legis-'
lature. or of remaining in bllssful ignOr-
ance concerning the same. The next
legislature should be prevailed upon to
remedy this evil
An exchange Gays that ali editor out
West, having been asked III he had ever
seen a bald-head woman, replied: "No;.
we never did Nor did we ever see a
woman wAltEing around town. with n
cigar Between her teeth and running into
-azrry saloon she saw. We.ne0 saw 4
woman ges fshing with a bottle in her
hip pocket sitpa the damp ground all
day; and go home atniRht drunk. Nor
have we seen woman>y >yAnk off her coat
and swear that SHE conlt lick any woman
in town. God bless her she lsD,t built
that way" '',
The sheep man has u, mucl, hc,ter out
look for his industry to-day, says tho
Mnndan Pioneer, than be has had for
some time: The Country is about ten
millions short of sheep, rs compared With
1892, while the population Of tile nation
five years The owner of 1000 head of
sheep can feel that his property is worth
vt least 81 600 more than it was six
months ago. Wool and mutton will both
be higher than they are now, and the nd-
vance in price up to dale is q handsome
one.
The editor sat in his office, whence all
but him had fled, and he wished that
every last deadbeat was in his grave :
stone dead. His mind then wandered far
away, to the time when he should die,
and his royal editorial soul should 20
shooting to the sky; when he'd roam The
| fields OF paradise. and sail DER jasper
seas, and all things glorious would com.
bine his every sense TO please. He
thought how then he u look across sttie
great gulf, dark and drear, thassll yawn
between his happy soul and those who
swindle here; and when for water they
would call, and in agony they would
caper; he d shout to them, Just quench
your thirst with the due that's on your
paper.
Passing Away.
The Grand Army Is dying at the. rate of
one hundred a day, says the ST. Louis
Globe e-Democrat. Every fifteen mluules
OF the twenty-four hours the final taps
sound for some one who wore the blue
Every year puts under the sod more old
soldiers than there are enlisted men aud
officers in the United States army. Tim:
is carrying Them off fasterin the ninetles
than bullets did'in tDee sixties. The war
lasted four years to u month. II the four
years liz, 900 men fell in battle on the
Union side. But now between 35, 600 and
4O, 600 die IN the course of nature each
succeeding twelve months. Aud, for
every three Union veterans who 90 to
flames eternal camping ground, two
Confederates are numbered with the dead.