The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1897-10-21
for dMo1nen

iety. says Lady Burke III the NeWafh
Evening News. If she has no definite oc-
cIpation, she is always uncertain of her
future. and may be driven by unforeseen
circumstances il any direction. Her
character and person may be all that
could be desired, and hope may iiutter
around her heart and fan her daydreams.
nevertheless shu cannot escape the anxi-
ETY. that besets uncertainty. But one
thing she may de. and her duty TO herself
demands it of her. She can prepare her
Self for certain given eventualities; she
can study, with the interest that a keen
chess player feels in his game. The proba-
bilities of the moves on LIES checkered
board, and SO avoid a checkmate.
II, from the carelessness of her pa
rents or from any other cause. her edu-
cation has been neglected. or not work.
ed on the most useful lines. she must
study to make good the deficiency. Every
person arrived at the years of reflection
can do his. and many of those most
distinguished for Intellectual abilities
have taught themselves. 1t only re-
quires good sense and moras resolution.
Books and other means are accessible to
all. and two or three hours a day of
steady work would effect valuable re-
suits. and bring pleasure as we'll as pro-
lit. If one-third of the time devoted 10
useless and pernicious novels were
spent in serious reading. the sex would
lose the charge of %fippancy and vacuity
that is now made against it. Serious read
ing, too. offers a charming variety his
tory. poetry. biography, travel. phisoso-
ply and all the sciences. There are gold
en- mines in literature that have been
rarely explored. and many of our best
works lie buried in dust on their shelves.
The race OF the maudIin Tyellow-baeks
meanwhile goes on nnerrily. IL is not
from such pabuinm as these afford that
the minds of sensible women can be
nourished. They foster false emotion and
spread the seeds oil many faisetoods- but
rarely quicken higher sentiment or lofty
thought. Intellectual taste was developed
for a better purpose than TO become the
slave of the trashy three-yolume novel,
The girl emerging into womanhood may
be satisfied with her moderate personal!
attractions. or may be lowered with the
fatal gift of beauty" but something more
is required before she is tit to become a
wife and a mother. or even a useful mem
Der of society. Physical loneliness. is fas-
cinating while it lasts. but its reign is
brief. and no amount Of artificial substi-
tuition can supply it's place. Intelligence
and amiability. however, never grow old,
and a pretty woman without rhsse, even
in the glory of her youth, is only a play
thing for an hour: She whose soul is IL
Illuminated and beautified can afford TO
dispense with cosmetic, powders ana
paints and other deceits. Engaging in
mind and natural in body, she wins es-
TEEN by her candor and virtues. Her
charms never decay, and in the evening
of life she is as dear to her husband as On
their wedding day.I 1t is the strongest re-
proaeh to young women that they rate
the or-namentation of their bodies so
much higher than that of their minds;
that they spend nearly all the time and
money they possess in personal decora-
ton. and give so little toward self-culti-
walton. YET we know that they do this
because the majority of men prefer it so.
and therefore the reproach lies still
heavier on these. They ask for dolls and
they get them; for empty-headed women
who pail upon them before the honey
moon is over, and the matrimonial market
is consequently flooded with such.
The chief danger to young women 2t
the ourset Of their lives is iattery-espe-
cially male fiattery. Foolish mothers, in
their fondness, teach them before they
can lisp to love snowy clothes and orna-
ments. e-omplimenting them TO their faces
and give them the first taste Tor what
may at length become their ruin. Thus
we see little girls mincilg in gait and az
fecting the airs Of adult vanity. AS they
SOW they reap. The girl in her teens gets
a lover, who writes a sonnet 10 his mis-
tress's eyebrow" AS she grows older her
appetite for fattery becomes grosser and
at length Unsuitable.
1t is most important that girls and
young women should be very careful in
the selection of friends and acquaintance.
The proverb says:-"All are not friends
that speak US fair One may rid oneself
at once of a worthless book. but not so of
a worthless friend. Such an one has a
limpet-like capacity for sticking Casual
mountaineering is SO risky that it would
be better TO be altogether avoided, and
only those of known reputation should
be admitted TO ayoung womanss intimacy.
Association with worthy acquaintance
may ripen into friendship, but the process
should be a slow and careful one. no mat
ter to which sex they may belong. Friend
ship is too momentouS 10 De mdae ndsliiy
or thoughtlesssly. For the whole course
of a life may be seriously affected BY it.
sFriendship,@ said a classical writer. is
stronger than kindred" II so, how nee
essary it must be 10 exercise the wisest
discretion in entering upon 1t.
If friendship requires careful hoice
love, which is of more Importance, comes
unbidden, and probably only comes once.
We mas esteem from reflection, may like
from association, but we can neither love
nor refuse to love at will. Love. too. can
neither be bought, nor sold, bartered nor
~bargained for. As the proverb says, Love
is the lodestone of love" And this is one
OF the most powerful reasons why a girl
should guard against chance acquaintance
lest she bestow it on some one unworthy
of IL. Amorousness and fts of fancy aris-
ing from propinquity are cornmo en-
ough ana sufficiently mischievous, but
love is rare. is. constant. stronger than
death. and deeper than the grave. Wret-
ched are they who pestow without rsceiv-
ing; happy are they who find it. The girl
who -contemplares marriage should be
well assured that she possesses q real
love. and that it is mutual. Nothing else
can make welded life happy. or even en-
durable 10 h:ghly-strunG natures. And
that 1t may not be barred in after-life by