The Wichita daily eagle., 1897-06-17
Stories of an Inland State.

|
ing chairs. s,ckiy geraniu7n. several
wooden cofgins polished to a high degree
standing on their ends. center table, a
! Bible and general air of gloom. In the
front windows were two rather ornate cas-
keis in horizontal repose, whose function
was partly notification to the passing pub
tic OF the nature of the establishment and
partly an assurance that with such rich
caskets as these to be had 1t was an actual
pleasure to die. whether for ones country
or not mattereG little.
The proprietor, MIR. Martin, was a man OF
small stature and bursting rotundity OF
girth. SO much so, in fact. that his legs.
early and propneticaily aware of the heavy
task before them, began, after a small ankle.
to spread out tremendously and never ceas-
ed spreading until they ended beneath his
over-hanging paunch. Above an incline
of snowdr.ven shirt-front rested glowing,
| chubby face, which in its naturally happy
lines revealed a certain grotesque sorrow,
parity real and partly artificial. The DOWN
| ward indenture of the corners of the mouth
| was artificial and you would say that he
held the look Of stern sorrow with an effort.
But there was marked wall of the eyes
"a pitiable look of abject despair in these
! large blue eyes which you would unhesitat-
| irgIy declare to be nEnistakable indicative
of some lasting cor:osion OF his peace OF
| mind.
Mr.. Martin. with a watery eye gave
| generous sweeping glance which took in all
| the collins in this front room, and which
| Travelled half way back again and rested
with a dumb, pathetic stare on several
small members of the coffin family.
| Then he sighed heavily and rested his
| clasped hands on his paunch and signing
| again said audibly in part and maud. bly,, in
part without regularity in ei-hef. as Is the
wont OF modern soliloquists:
why does the sun shine? What Is sun
shine 10 me? What is the open-eyed daisy
worth to me? What has the babbiing brook
| got to babbie to me?'
He glanced appealingly at a large coffin
| with a look which asked for and despaired
simultaneously Of an answer from the burial
case.
He heaved another sigh and drawing the
corners of his mouth down abruptly said:
Nothing
The PLAIN facts were that Mr. Martin had
answered himself correctly. From the day
OF his birth he had felt the imperative ne
ce ss!ty of bubbl;ng over, r.sibly, al every
provocation. The whole world was joke
to him. Nothing was too serious TO hide
from his humorous nature its funny side
BY q chain of curious chances he had be-
ccme an undertaken in this western town.
The calling had in vain attempted to blight
him. 1t could not. he was always in re-
c.pal stock in trade. His solemnity. But
he knew that that solemnity was his prin-
oipal stock in trade. His solemnity had
driven poor Hits. his competitor, who af-
fected fast horses and occasionally ''iiqucr-
ed up' almost out of business. The women
of the town. and women really make the
SCI ,,l rf~f1prrQkprS
own death, had forsaken the bleary-eyed
Hits with countenance showing traces OF
BacChanalian revelry, for the solemn-eyed,
morose Martin
Mr.. Martin understood this perfectly. He
felt that every dollar in his till was mfnted,
by some curiousiy devised mechanism.
from dropping corners Of his bnghted
mouth.
Wien he entered church Sunday morning,
he felt and knew that his sadness was gain
ing him custom. He did not resent 1t. But
he retaliated-by looking over the congre- |
cation soberly and dealing in futures.
The vain Mrs Gibbons in the front pew
with her tossing plumes, may have, indeed |
did feel certain pleasure when the grave |
Mr. Martin bent his eyes upon her. but she |
certainiy would have cried out in horror if |
she had known that Mr.. Martin was stu
diousiy weighing the chances of her living |
until autumn frcm her jaundiced cheek and |
figuring whether a box fivo feet six or five |
feet eight would hold her.
Just now Martin saw little group on the |
sidewalk opposite his establishment and |
impelled by an impulse which he knew was |
evil and was certainly bent on making him /
crack smile he started across to JON il.
Suddenly he stopped short and said to
himself:
Il mustn't go. It's Daisy telling it and it's
a joke. Oh, but it must be funny. damn
ably funny and / won't be able to laugh
Some day III burst out and end it all No,
1 mustn't co.
While he was still arguing so, his legs
with naughty independence carried him
across the street.
Tell it again." some one in the crowd |
cried. Tell it again. Here's Martin"
Mr.. Daisy, the narrator, with that en-
which forbids a man to re-
tell story to the same crowd, coushed and
said: Il was just telling'm about Gin-Fizz
George"
Mr. Martin raised his eyebrows and sigh
ed
.'Gin-Fizz filed up" Daisy went on try
ing TO select new words for the old story |
and sam fresh applause from an old aud.-
ence. And went down on Pepper creek
ard threw in his line with little worm cn |
the hook that a sun perch would turn UP
is nose at. Then he took a pull at his
bottle and fell over in the sunflowers and
went dead TO sleep. Just then my boy and
Ed Snooks and Harry Treat come monkey
ng along tire bank soaring the bull frogs
ii and they run against old Gin-Fizz snor-
ng Ike a bumb,e bee with the dyspepsia
Then my boy goes down in his pocket and
axes out little pulley-wheel such as they
use to pull up awnings and he studies II a
ong time and he says: i got an idea Then
10 takes the other boys little way apart
30 as 10 not wake old Gin-Fizz and they
lold a consuIta ton. Then Ed Snooks slips
ID ard pulls out Gin-Fizzs hook and ties
long fresh line TO L. Then the boys get ]
ID on the railroad bridge ard carry the ]
string with them after putting Gin-Flzz's
,obber back in the wafer. Then the boys J
ook that little pulleywheel and tied IL to
railroad coupling PIN. passed the line !
through il and dropped it easily into the !
middle OF the stream and then they crossed !
'ver ard hid in some bushes with the end l
# the fiue which went through the pulley .
N the bottom OF the river and was tied TO :
re ole fellows hook
Mr. Martin suddenly grew very red in the >
ace and coughed with such violence that 2
he story was interrupted.
We'll those boys waited an eternal long
ime for old Gin 70 wake up and finally !
hey threw a clod over and he got up. Then
~ boy gave the string a r:;le jerk and
ibbie nibble wer. GINS bobbe--'
Mr. Martin pulled his handkerchief out
uddenly and wiped his eyes and blew his
ose. {
Then Ed Treat grabbed the line and +,
ulled il slow so the bobeer Wen, under
ioxly Old Gin grabbed the pole and
-a,tad n second and the bobbsr came up d