The leader., 1897-12-08

of water, carefully scraped a nutmeg
into it, and, after removing his coat,
necktie and collar, he advanced to the
front of the platform and began:
MY frens," he said, as he locked his
fingers together and then looked be-
nignly down upon the shiny bald
Uranium of Judge Cantelope White,
does riches make happiness or does
she not? At de fust go-off, it would
appear dat she did. When we see a
rich man ridin' by in his kerridge, his
arms folded. his head up high, an his
black bosses prancin' along as proud
as pcacocks, we am apt to envy him
an wish we was in his place. We see
only outside appearances. If we could
foller dat pusson to his home OF lux.
Try we should take different view OF
de case. De mint he gifts into de house
his wife wants fo'teen thousand dollars
fur new dresses; de chillun cry fur him
to buy an elephant; de cook has broke
70 plates while washin' de dishes, an
de gas bill is ober seven dollars mo- dan
it was do month befo'. DE proud smile
on dat rich mans face fees away an he
goes out behind de ban an kicks his
self an wishes he had nebber bin bon.
Cheers, shouts and wild applause.)
"You go into rich mans house"
continued the orator, San yo' see lace
curtains, kivered chars, fine carpets
an heaps O. brick-abats. Some OF 'em
has got as many as five beds upstairs,
an If you go down cellar YOU find
hull bar'l O. pork and 16 bushels of
'taters. Muffin seems wantin' to COM
plete dat mans happiness, but OATS
all on de outside. He may be sittin'
around on dem fine carpets or lookin'
at hisself in one of dem lookin' glasses,
which neber costs less dan nine dol
lars, when he gifts a telegraph. He
opens it to find dat somebody has
robbed de grave of his gran'fadder out
In Chicago, and demands one millyun
dollars to restore de body. Applause
so vigorous that two legs fall out of the
stove and serious calamity was mar
rowly averted1
4 war in de private otis of mill
yunaire de odder day. He was cuttin'
ue coupons off his bloated bonds. OAR
war II bags of gold on his right hand
an IL bar'ls of silver on his left. [Sup-
pressed excitement.l OAR war TO-
eushels of diamonds piled up behind
ue Stove, an about two bar'ls of pearls
an opals ober by de washstand. [Whis-
pers OF Yum! Yum!"l Dat pusson
owned de awfullest biggest plantation
N DE hull souf. He had six millyun
NOSES an cattle. He owned TO banks
an SIX railroads. He owned all de
yeoges an half de lawyers in de state.
II 20 frowed club at his dawg he
e So hev yo' sent to prison for life.
loighs and groans.] An wild all dis
power an riches, was dat man happy ?
w. lie had sore heel; his stomach
was out of order; he was gittin' bald
u Top OF his head; he woke up In de
Aignt and saw spooks wavin' DER arms
,'er MIN, an he said be would give all
ue mad on airth to be like me. [Applanse
which put out three lamps and upset
'ne water pail
No, my frens," calmly contin ued the
orator, after slipping q little more nut
meg riches doan make happiness.
y Is Jest handy when yo' feel like
sou IKE to git measured for TO- new
sa'r's' or yo' want fried chicken fur
- inner All de rest Is vanity. an suah
- Dring trouble. Take de case OF
sa,no'g Watkins, Of dis club. at whose
soln ! am stoppin' temporarily. free
slarge' He's got q rag carpet an
ss eane-seat cheers IN. his parlor.