The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-12-06
STORY ORA SEVERED HEAD


whiskers-that is. as far as the de-
scription can go.
A colleague OF the doctor holds the
position of anatomical demonstration in
the same college, and it fell out re-
Gently that he stood in need of a head
for dissection.
Now, it happens that doctor No. is
connected with a hospital, and to him
No. , appealed for help in supplying
the deficiency in the matter of heads.
No. l readily undertook to fill the
want, and in doing so made a story
which he considers funny and tells,
with every Indication of being sincere
in his belief, to his professional and
semi-professional friends.
Shortly after the professor applied to
me, said the doctor, a woman died in
the hospital. She was one of those
unknown and friendless beings who
drift into the paupers' plat at our
cemeteries if unclaimed for scientific
purposes, SO l put in a claim on her
and appropriated the head.
l had arranged with the doctor to
leave the head in the back hall at the
college, to the door of which I had
key. So 1 wrapped it in paper and
slowed ii in a basket and went on
about my duties in the hospital. 1t
L
was drizZling rain when / boarded the
car to go to the college.
When it came to paying my fare
discovered that [ had left my keys at
home. and 1 knew the college janitor
could not be found at that hour, so
decided to take the head home with me-
The car was crowded with damp peo-
pie, when it stopped to take in an adj
ditional crowd, and large middle
a cd Oil 40
her way through the damned aisle as
no one but fat woman can, and
crowded her ample proportions between
myself and young woman on my
right.
The fat party carried her umbrella
in defiant manner, so L moved away
from her as far as possible, consign-
ing her to oblivion, as we'll as I could
consign, with some hundreds of pounds
OF her form resting on my lap. The
basket was on the floor of the car at
my feet, and as I had covered it with
several papers I did not give it a
thought until a little scream, all out
OF proportion to her SIZE yelling up
from the fat woman and an eXclam-
nation OF horror from the young wom-
an called my attention to them.
Then l saw the fat dame hastily re-
moving her umbrella from my basket,
where she, guided by the evil star that
dominates the actions of fat women.
had poked 1t. disarranging the papers
to SUCH an extent that the face of the
head within looked up at the frightened
passengers like mute victim of some
dark and sinful deed appealing to them
for vengeance.
Wool! Murderi'' snorted the fat
woman, and the man hanging to the
strap above my head, and between
whose feet the basket stood, looked
! down, then bolted for the door. / bent
over the evidence of my guilt and at
1 tempted to hide it, while the people in
/ that end of the car who had seen if
/ crowded upon each other in an effort
! TO give the red-handed murderer more
/ room. 1 lost no time in taking ad-
1 vantage Of the space left clear and
made my way to the front door, where
l dropped off the car with nv shame
/ ful load, feeling very much like the
murderer they had taken me to be. and
! which l would undoubtedly have been
II had had that fat woman in some
| seQuestered spot just then.
I waited until a car came with room
/ outside for the basket and myself,
momentarily expecting a policeman to
rush breathlessly up and clap hand
CUTS upon my wrists. When [ reached
home l found a message which d.
rected me to call at once at the house
/ OF a patient, an apoplectic old lady
and as the message had been delivered
haI an hour before [ arrived, [ felt
/ that had no time to tarry. SO | sent
Tor my carriage and rushed into the
mouse, leaving the basket in the dining
room threw the remedies I was
most likely to need into my case and
rushed out again, forgetting to give
the servant any instructions concern
ing the basket
n
! VIE went into the dining room. fOund
the basket, explored it's contents. and
Wen, my wife is woman, so she could
do little else but faint, which she did
promptly and effectively, precludine il
! by scream.
The cook went to the rescue and
emuiated her mistress by tumbline
down in heap on top OF her at thu
first glimpse of the unfortunate head
The impact of the cooks frame brought
my Wife to her senses, who set about
bringing the cook cut of her trance.
She succeeded finally, then directed
her to carry the basket into nv H.
Drary. AT that the cook openly re.
oelled, supplementing the refusal with
notice that she was going to leave
When L returned home [ received 2
lecture from my wife and the informa.
llon OF the cooks Intentions The cook
was a good one and [ did not care r.
lose her, so l undertook to explain
put nothing would satisfy her or shake
her discrimination to go, and I believe
she thought 1 had brought the heaf
home as a replenishment of the family
larder from dark hints she threw oul
While L was talking with her.
L carried the head, which seemed te
be pursued by some lucllless spirit thai
would not let it rest even in death. Il
the loft of the stable where nv coloref
coachman slept, and locked it in :
closet with a set Of old harness.
Next morning l went to the Office
without giving the hidden basket :
thought, and when I returned in thu
evening my wife Informed me that tbt
coachman had not been seen all dav
The coachman was a tall, yellow fellow
about 80 years of age, who had beer
in my employ two years. Staalins
came to him as naturally as sleeping
and l had on more than one occasion
traced missing articles of small yalu,
to his failing in that direction
figured it out that he had been to,
free with some one else's property ant
landed in jail at last.
AS knew where he lived I concluded
70 drive over, at the same time fakins
the head to the COLLEGE