davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
WHAT HE MADE.
The Man Told. and Yet the Professor Was
Not Satisfied.

The Man Told. and Yet the Professor Was
Not Satisfied.
Professor b, who conducts tho
clinic of nervous diseases at ---- Med
ioal college of Chicago, is himself n
very nervous and easily irritated man.
Recently Mt the close of long clinic,
when teacher and students were we'll
tired out, tho assistant rushed in and
asked TO have exhibited very interest
ing case which had just arrived
well he quick about it. +" said the
Doctor and he proceeded to emphasize
somo previous remarks concerning tho
influence Of occupation upon nervous
conditions. which point he proposed to
illustrate i'll the case TO be- presented.
Tho patient, an awkward Swede,
having been hustled into chair, was
now confronted by Professor B.,
with the admonition To be brief and nc
ourato in his replies, as time was linn
tied
Nov. sir. what do you dor" no com
mencod.
Jaw am not vera we'll.
mo. say, what do you do?"
ooh, yasI Aw verl. +"
Yes, | know, but what kind Of
work."
"Oh, Get es hard vork. "
yes, but do you shovel (illustrat-
ing with gcsture) 'or drive II car or
work at machine, or do
"Oh, yasl Aw verls at IA masheen.
" Ali What kind of maehinel'
"Oh, ct ees Il big masheenp"
BY this time tho students were grin.
ming broadly and whispering pleasan,
tries, all of which caused the professor tc
redden and break into volley at The
| poor Swede.
Now look here. sir want no NOR,
of this. You answer tho questions asl
yon or go homa What do you mako on
this maohino?"
A ray Of intelligence lit up tho face
of tho Swedo and, with confident
smile, ho said. ooh, now aw understan
vol Yo' want to know vat aw max ON
tho masheop, eesn't ctr"
Yes. sir, that is 1t. What do you
maker"
"Aw max II cents an hour. And
he and the class were dismissed -Hnr-
per i Magazine.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08

A member Of military band at n
certain barrack came to the surgeon re-
Gently with a long face and plaintive
story about u sore throat.
Sore throat. eh, said the surgeon
pleasantly. Let mo see. Oh, that s
not so bad A slight irritation; nothing
more. You'll be all right in day or
two. think you had better fake no
risk in renewing the trouble by using
your throat. though, go / will recon-
mend you for a fortnight's sick leave ="
Armed with the surgeons certificate,
the bandman obtained his two weeks
sick leave The two weeks had just
come to an end when he met the sur
geon ON the parade ground. The band
man saluted. The surgeon recognized
the face and stopped.
"How's the throat" he asked pleas
antly.
It's quite well, sir. was tho reply.
That's good, said the surgeon.
"You can get back to your duty with
out fear. BY the way, what instrument
do you handle in the bandY'
1.-THE small drum, sir, " said the mu-
stefan. Chicago News.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
" WHERE NEITHER MOTH NOR RUST
CORRUPT

10 peradventure In the years to be
You come, q child, TO narrower needs of mo
As the world widens to you-even although
Life touch you with Indifference as you go
No longer hand In hand and heart to heart
should we he borne apart.
Thrust far asundor in the hurrying press
Even SO | shall not fare companionless
| mid the last late loiterers wandering slow,
With wearied, cquable pace,
The solaee of the sunset ON my face
The sunset spacious and low
With tired feet III the dew,
Lifting mine eyes where you
Far in the forefront of the pageant ride,
Mailed in the splendors of your strength and
pride,
You-yet another you,
Yourself AS verily-leans his cheek to mine,
Lifts inarticulate eloquenco divine
With hahbling call and coo.
The small down Vesturcd head
Golden and faint,
Pale as tho aureolo of child saint,
Dear as tender thought of one long dead
The innocent eyes. the sweet
mpetuous little feet
These. though tho world went mourning for
your sake,
Not the sheer tomb could take
The sweet eyes plead. the futtering hands i'm.
plore,
The frail arms cling us fondly as before
The strange years worked their will.
Child of my heart though change and time
divide
Ale and your later semhlance, you abide
However time may devastate or fulhll,
Safe. incorruptiblo, shall my treasure hide
Borne ON my breast, light pattering ut my side.
The fair ghost linger still.
-Rosamund Marriott Watson in Harper's Mag
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
UNNECESSARY HEROlSM.
A Connecticut Mans Experience with -
Substitute Bathtub.

substitute Bathtub.
One of the most ridiculous situations
which at the time bring the coolest
sweat out on mans brow and ever
after remain with him as q constant
source of nirth occurred to u Shelton
merchant He thought no would take n
bath, and as his fiat is minus ono Of tho
chief requisites for tho job-a bathtub
tho extempori2ed ono out of small
washtub and enjoyed cooling ablu-
ton.
He had just concluded and stepped
from tho tub for tho towel, when sud-
denly the top hoop of tho tub burst with
sharp report, and tho man saw to his
horror that tho whole contents of tho
tub would soon be flooding tho floor. At
the same moment no thought of tho
store beneath and tho amount Of dam
ago tho water would do rs 1t ran down
through tho ceiling Ho is man of
quick thought, and i'll n moment no did
tho only thing possible-threw himself
down beside tho tub and, olasping his
arms around it, held tho already fast
swelling slaves together Ho was sue
cessful i'll keeping tho water in--but
what situation He dared not yell, for
he was hardly i'll condition to receive
callers, especially as he knew that all
in tho block ut the time were of the
gontler sex, and he realized nc once that
the only thing left for him was TO stay
in that position until tho return of his
wife. who was out on shopping expe-
dition.
Like the boy who saved Holland. he
manfully remained in his most uncom-
Portable position until relief in tho
shape of his wife appeared. Then, to cap
the climax, when he asked her TO get II
rope or any old thing to tic about tho
tub, she, after II long fit OF uneontrolla-
Bile laughter asked him why no didn t
carry tub and contents out to the sink
room and pour out the water. With n
look that fro2o tho smile ON her face he
did as she said and without word don
ned his clothing and wandered out into
the cold, unfeeling world, crushed
and Inundated man. -Ansonia Senti-
mol
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08

Barristers' fees in England are Il
variable quantity. As viewed in So
licitor's bill of costs they look some
what mysterious. A barrister's guinea
$50 25I is always 81 3s. Cd. $50. SO; ,
guineas $50 800 are invariably e. I'd.
(SfI.76), and so ON. This is explained
by the fact that he charges IL supple
mentary fee for his clerk at tho rate of
2s. Cd (G2 cents) for every guinea he
earns No fee il less than II guinea. An
unwrttcn law, dating from tho time
when the guinea was coin of the
realm, DEGREES that barristers must not
accept silver. One transgression of this
rule is recorded A somewhat impccuni-
Gus member Of the profession accepted
few shillings as payment from poor
client lilo was promptly called before
the benchers of the inn to explain. His
plea was that if he did not take gold no
at least took all the man had got,
whereupon he was at once bonorably
acquitted. 1t was impossible to cavil ut
such "a worthy upholding Of all the ira
ditions Of the profession. Like physi-
Clans barristers cannot recover their
dues at law The fee is supposed to be
an "honorarium" which was not ex.
pected. There is quaint survival Of
the alleged sensitiveness of barristers
about fees. In their gowns may still BIO
noticed sort Of long, narrow pocket
arrangement, hanging down at the
back of the left shoulder Its occupa-
ton is gone now, but III the old time it
was the recognized receptacle for the
guineas which were supposed to be
dropped in surreptitiously by the client
Very different is the brazen effrontery
Of these days, when eminent pleaders
will calmly demand their 80 guineas
retainer" to induce them even to look
at the profIercd brief. New York Mail
and Express.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
Natures Rattleboxes.

Near New Brunswick, N j., says
Minerals, are found hollow balls. or
masses, of yellow iron ore which con-
tain loose particles that rattle. when
shaken, like the contents of child's
rattlebox. 1t is thought that when the
concretions of ore were formed the GEN.
trail parts consisted principally of some
material which afterward dissolved
away. SO that the interior space now
contains only fragments of ore and sand.
When these balls are broken, the frac-
tured edges sometimes show beautiful
bands of red and yellow.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
No Sound of II.

Many languages arc devoid of certain
sounds quito familiar to us. Tho
Chinese, for instance. has no sound
equivalent TO our "r. +" For America u
Ohinaman says Yamelika. !" The So
ciety islanders could not pronounce
either 90" or tx, " and tho nearest APP
proach they could mako to tho name of
tho celebrated navigator Cook. who Wis
tied their shores, was Tut. "
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08

There is no necessity for this A clergy
man adds nothing to his usefulness, but
greatly detracts from it. by neglecting his
health II a man, be he clergyman or layman,
will resort to the right remedy just AS soon
as he feels out Of sorts, and knows that he
is a little bilious, or that his liver is torpid,
or his digestion Is out of order he will re-
main healthy and robust and add much TO
his usefulness and many years to his life.
DR.. Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery
restores the appetite, makes digestion and
assimilation perfect, invigorates the liver,
purfcs the blood and tones the nerves. II
is the greatest Of all known blood makers
and flesh builders. II cures % per cent of
all cases Of consumption and diseases of
the air passages Thousands who were
given up by the doctors and had lost all
hope have testified to their complete re-
covery under this marvellous medicine. II
is the discovery Of an eminent and skillful
specialist, DR.. r. v Pierce, for thirty years
chief consulting physician to the Inyalids'
Hotel and Surgical institute, al Buffalo,
NY. All medicine dealers sell it,
Eight years ago was taken with what my
doctor called liver complaint" writes n. r.
Kendfick Esq. Of Campton, Grafton Co, New
Hampshire 81 began doctoring Tor it, taking
sarsaparilas and other medicines. Last Febri-
ary had a bilious attack and could not sit up
long enough to eat. began taking Dr. Pierce :
medicines I have taken one bottle Of Golden
Medical Discovery and one vial OF Pleasant
Pellets lind no other medicine equal To yours
in helping me
Without an equal for constipation and
biliousness - DR. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08

When you buy "A few yards of cloth
in Japan. tho merchant always unrolls
the whole piece and cuts Off tho inside
end, in order that you may not have to
iakc the part that il faded and shop
worn.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08

From the tops the cathedral spire in
Mexico you can see the entire city, and
the most striking feature Of the view is
the absence of chimneys There is not
a chimney in all Mexico, not CRATE
nor "a stove nor furnace. All tho cook
ing il done with charcoal in Dutch
ovens
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
Tho Gnnh Ont nIIi

Landlady-I believe in letting coffee
boil for 30 minutes; that's the only
way to get the goodness out of it,
New Boarder (tasting his and leaving
it)-You succeeded admirably. ma am.
London Fun
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08

The average clergy
man Is not a healthy
man. There are many
reasons that contrib
ute TO make him deli
Aacate. He leads Il
OSse dentary life.
He doesn't take
sufficient exer-
else Just the same
he Is a hard work ing
man. He takes too
much trouble about
other peoples troub-
les TO trouble much
about his own. lie
think rs too much
about other sick pco-
| pie to look after his
own health The re-
suit is that the hard
working clergyman
becomes a semi in
mild eatlu In Lie
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08

Bowling, billiards and card playing
are unlawful in Michigan, according to
some dead letter statutes.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.

T7IAIE UF HNDHh" u bINDi DECkAskD'
Pursuant to the order of o. II Sproul Surrogate
Of the County of Hunt erdon, made on the seventh
day Of May. A. ID. one thousand eight hundred
and ninetyseyen, notice is hereby given TO all
sons having claims against the estate of A ndreY
l., Bird, late of the County of Hunterd0n, de-
ceased, to present the same under oath or aft r.
nation, to the subscriber, Administrator of said
deceased. within nine months from the date OF said
order and any creditor neglecting to bring In and
exhibit his or her claim under oath or sili
ton within the time limited, will be forever
barred of his or her action therefor against the
said Administrator.
Dated May 7th. A. ID. 1897.
GEORGE w. ARNWGNE. Administrator
May &c, 1897.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.

ESTATE or CATHARIEg McNEILLY, DECEASED.
Pursuant to the order OF o. II. Sproul, Surrogate
OF the County of Hunter1OD made on the six tenth
day of January, A. D. ore thousand eight
hundred and ninety -seyen, notice Is hereby given
to all persons having ella inns against the estate of
Gatbarine McNeily, kite OF the County Of Hun
terdon, deceased, TO present the same under oath
or affirmation, to the subscriber, Executor of
said deceased, within nine months from the date
oisaid order and any creditor negleetiug TO bring
In and exhibit his or her claim under oath or
Affirmation, within the time so limited will be
forever barred Of his or her action therefor
against the said Executor.
Dated January 10th, A. ID. 1897.
A. ID. ANDERSON,
Jan. 20, 1897. Executor.
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
CHARLES A. STRAUSS,

Manufacturer of
Marble aud Granite Monuments, II cad
stones, Enclosures, &c,
N RFH UNION STREET MAR NJ. E. c HuRon
LAMRERfNIl.fE. N. J.
Nov. ., iss7.-iy
The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1897-09-08
NOTICE.

Mywife having left my bed and board, hereby
give notice that / will not be responsible for any
debts OF her contraction. ,-,,-,s
Lambertville, n. J., June 10, ls07.-3t.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03

4G TON. DETROIT Mich, Jan. 10, 1897.
ITO TIE REPUBLICAN ELECTORS OF THE STATE
or MICHIGAN:
The republican electors of the State of Mich
bgan, and all others who may desire To unite
with them in upholding the principles or the
republican party. as declared IN It's platforms,
are hereby requested TO send delegates TO the
State convention of said party, 10 be held at
the Auditorium, in the city OF Detroit, on
Tuesday, February %, 1897, beginning at III
O'Clock q IN, for The purpose OF nominating
candidates for justice OF the supreme court
and Two regents OF the university, ana the
Eransaction OF such other business as may
properly come before the convention.
Every county will be entitled TO one dele
gate Tor each 90 OF the total vote cast Tor gov
sern0r at the last State election November,
1896, and one additional delegate Tor every
fraction amounting to $40, but each organized
scouaty will be entitled TO at least two Dele
gates.
trict are requested to meet in caucus at III
% clock q m, on February %, 1897, to select
candidates, as follows, to be presented 10 the
State con yeution for confirmation; One vice.
president, one assistant secretary, and one
member for each OF the committees on ere
sdenUsls," permanent organization ana order
of business" and resolutions, and Tor the
rtranss ction of any other business properly
coming before them
In accordance with resolution adopted
June 3D. 1880, the officers OF each county con-
yention are requested to forward to the secre-
aary OF the state central committee (Lansing).
10y the earliest mail after the delegates 10 the
State convention have been chosen certified
list OF such delegates and their respective
ypostofice address, from their respective coun-
6ies as are entitled to seats in the convention
Under the above, the following counties are
santitled TO
Houghton. ................15 delegates
heweenaw .............'...... =,
3arsga .............''.''''''' q.
~ 49, DEXTER M. FERRY.
DENNIS E. AWARD, Chairman.
Secretary.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03

have given Chamberlain s Cough Rem
edy fair test and consider it one Of the
very best remedies for Group that have
ever found. One dose has always been
sufficient, although use it freely. Any
cold my children contract yields very
readily to this medicine. can conscient-
iously recommend 1t for Group and colds
in children-George Z. Wolff. clerk of
the circuit court, Fernandina, Fla. Sold
by Sodergren & Sodergren.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03
The Opera House Orchestra.

This is the same organization that
played at the performances OF the
operas, billie Taylor" and bohemian
Girl" thereby gaining a most enviable
reputation. In compliance with numer-
Gus requests from connoisseurs OF 8 cd
music the organization has been made n
permanent institution and now solicits
the patronage OF the public at large. No
amateur affair. but professional music
by professional musicians. Anyone de-
string the services Of the orchestra for
sacred or secular concerts, parties,
dances, ETC., will please apply to the mus
zeal director and manager, Mr.. Max Won
LEM, 205 Eighth street, Red Jacket.
Special music arranged or supplied on
short notice. without extra charge.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03

Mr.. Ward l.. Smith, of Frederickstew WI.
Mo-, was troubled with chronic diarrhGa
for over thirty years. He had become
fully sati fled that it was only aqueeti' n
OF short time until he would have 10
give up. He had been treated by son e
OF the best physicians in Europe and
Ameria, but got no permanent relief.
One day he picked up a newspaper and
CHANGED to read an advertisement OF
Chamberlain's Collie, Cholera and Diar-
rhea Remedy. He got bottle of it, Il e
first dose helped him and It's continued
used cured him. For sale by Sodergren
& Sodergren.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03
BosToN, February I. 1897

"a bull market" properly character
azes last weeks stock exchange trans
actions notwithstanding the fact that
there was no great activity. Prices ad-
vanced steadily and in q way suggestive
of still higher prices and Of trading more
widely distributed throughout the list.
A very noticeable demand has sprung up
for railroad bonds which might come
under the head OF second-class, as distin-
gui-hed from the gilt-edge Investment Sc
.curities, and these bonds have advanced
In market value materially during the
past two weeks. IL is only question Of
a short time before demand will be mo-
Iticed for the low priced railroad stocks
which, in turn, will advance proportion.
sately.
Saturday was the last business day oil
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03

House tn Rent-No. Ago Tamarack st vepy
Laurium, suitable for a small family VIZ
cheap rates. Apply on the premises IN.
To Reut-Four good rooms To- rent ia pine
quire of Mike Halter. on the PREMISES wv
street
Wanted To Rent-Eour or hve roo"''
Apply at the NEWS Office.
To Rent-Wanted to rent by com ,,s n
employee, house of four or nve Lv,,srs At
Yellow or Blue Jacket. Leave particu'"''
the News office.
For aale--An eight-ro0m house on nv 10
town road, No. 3046, Swedetown; h kRppss
John b. Wertin or at the companys onn0o,
For 8alo-House No. 1888 RaympaulS os'
rooms. Enquire of Mat Lucas heo 9soA oh
For bsle-For $3.50, house No: 90 en- m.
barn, on county road, RaymDaui1o""
quire at house or of the company.
For Sale-House No. 1872 Lake Lino ro,ms.
enue. corner Railroad street. Len wv
inquire of the company.
For eale-House No. S101. ewedse.oosrsat.
Enquire at Joseph sotlich's store heo '"'
For sale--House No. s2os. swedetown ~
quire ut the house.. =,
For eale-House No. 8lni SIX roo%IS umst
situated In ewedetown. Apply !"
and Hecle mining company
For eals-House No. 2llb B street ns com.
baultown. Apply on the premises or inc
! Fer Ralo--House No. s120 Tunnel s"
0wedetown. Apply on the premises, No sfsS
For pale-eeven-room house, Lvto Alex
Tunnel street. swedetown. Apply
Beppala.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03
in the Anaconda mine, which yields but

in the Anaconda mine, which yields but
4 per cent.
The Boston Financial News say: "The
annual report of the Kearsarge Mining
Co. will issue TO shareh lders, about he
last part of next month. IL is no secret
that for the last five months Of the year
(1S96) stamping was suspended, because
the Tamarack required all OF its facilities
in that line. Daring the first five months,
however, the net mining profit Of the
Kearsargs was something like $35. 900;
but although stamping was discontin-
ued at the end Of that time temporarily,
development work was carried on IA usu-
al, and the expenditure for the balance OF
the year in that direction was something
like SIC. 900, 80 that the surplus added
for the twelve months, was about S25-,
900 in round numbers. making the total
surplus at the first OF this year, between
100000 and 100000. Some question
has arisen respecting the payment Of div
idends on the stock and we can state it
az being the best opinion Of those closely
identified with the property. that this
year will see 81 per share paid. We are
told also that never in the history Of the
mine has it looked so well as at pr, sent,
or with it's prospects so good"
EVERETT
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03
There Is Nothing So Good.

There is nothing just as good as DR..
Kings New Discovery for Consumption,
Coughs and Colds, so demand it and do
not permit the dealer to sell you some
substitute. He will not claim there Ia
anything better, but in order to make
more profit he may claim something else
to be just as good. You want DIR. Kings
New Discovery because you know it to be
safe and reliable, and guaranteed to do
good or money refunded. For Coughs,
Colds, Consumption and for all affections
OF Throat Chest and Lungs, there
is nothing &C good a. is DR.. Kings New
Discovery, Trial bottle free at d. T..
Macdonald's drug store. Regular size
90 cents and 81.
The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-02-03

Try Electric Bitters as a remedy for your
troubles? If not, get a bottle now and
get relief. This medicine has been found
to be peculiarly adapted to the relief and
cure of all female complaints, exertlng a
wonderful direct influence in giving
strength and tone to the organs. II you
have loss OF appetite, constipation, head
ache, fainting spells, or are nervous
sleepless, excitable. melancholy, or trou-
bled with dizzy spells, Electric Bitters is
the medicine you need. Health and
strength are guaranteed by its use.
Fifty cents and 81 at d. T. Macdonald
drug store.