The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1897-11-27
SIGHTS AT GREAT FALLS.
A Few Observations of an Observing
Gentleman in a Hot Town.

''AiN' 4 w. N'A WIN ~ iiitNINHAt't
in knowing what | have seen and heard.
Great Falls is Il great place for seeing
and hearing things, and whether from
undue exercise in listening, or from the
constant action of the high wind, the
people here are developing "a tendency
toward lop-ears--by climatic conditions
becoming like those of the state of
Washington.
At the point of the Missouri river
where Lewis and Clarke crossed in 1904
there is o II prosperous city of $4,000
inhabitants, with all the promise of
great achievement in both manufacture
ing and m 1t will be the only
great city between the Twins and the
coast, and your children, dear pard, will
see it. And if you, by fortunes, or mis-
fortunes, decree, don't happen to have
any children, your grand children will
see it.. This is an old gag, sandwiched
here only on the principle that one story
is good till another is erected
enjoyed one evening of superior ed
ification at the hall of the A. O. L. w.
last Thursday night. The Great Falls
lodge of this order has members, stout
hearted and true, as chivalrous as any of
the doughty adhdrents of the famous
Don Quixote. They wear their hearts
on the left side, and ballast the anatom-
ical ship by slowing the liver away on
the right. The stomach is placed
as nearly in the center as possible, but
sometimes a surplus cargo of free lunch
causes the vessel to veer and lurch, with
an occasional turning keel upwards. In
this emergency they are obliged to
throw some of the cargo overheard.
The lodge initiated a member while |
was here and | had a rare opportunity
to see the operations of a good degree
been introduced to the mysteries of the
secret art, nor had had a taste Of the glo-
ries that await the curious and credulous
children of unrest. He entered the hall
with buoyancy of heart. He went out
with buoyancy Of head. He stood up
to take the oath, and later declined to
be seated when hidden. He said there
was no longer any comfort in the sitting
posture. To become a good and true
workman was his hearts idol. To
make a good and true workman of him
the team was not idle. The first degree
was what the vernacular would call
"soup." The soup was administered by
means of a siphon.
And when the second degree was
reached, our candidate was given a fore
taste of heaven, by a superior eXempli-
f~ication of the dangers, trials and suffer
ings experienced in the flesh. He
thought any place would be heaven if
ONLY the team would desist with their
instruments of torture. But this they
could not do, else the merchandising
process would be incomplete. He was
cafrazzled and razooed; he was cross
hauled and dubbed and hornswoggled.
And when he came to the 2x4 admins
t~ration, Fred Arthur and Harry Prentice
were in fine form to give it to him right.
They raised his soul INTO the realms of
ethereal bliss and his hind feet four feet
off the floor. 1t was an interesting and
highly instructive performance, leaving
impressions on tine candidates mind
which will not o be erased. 1t left
other impressions also not of the mind,
which will be noticeable for a moon OIL
through with him he looked pleased.
The A. o. L. w. is a grand order.
enjoyed the pleasures this week of
attending a teachers institute is a place
where the school teachers of the county
congregate for a week to eat hotel chuck
and make new mashes. There the fair
and beautiful maidens of the county, of
all ages from IS to 20, spend the days
in a lecture room-and nights at a thea
ter. They imbibe new inspiration for
their winters work, together with such
other potablcs as the extent of their
purses warrant, or the nature of their
tastes require. That acknowledge maketh
a mans face to shine," is equally appli-
cable to women's faces. But the incan-
descent quality Is not so apt to center in
the nose. There were a great many col
ored ladies in attendance at the institute
but they were not born that way.
Paste and powder does the business
turning the complexion of an Arkansaw
turkey-egg into that of a luscious, sun
kissed peach. Some of the pedagogues,
distinguished from the pedagoguesses,
had double-decked brains-and in a few
instance they had flexed the towering
forehead back as far as the crown of the
head in order to get it out of the way.
A certain sprig of "A pedagogue was by
resolution of the teachers ostracised from
their society, all because they said lie