davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
A.oueer Misundersta nd,ne.

A certain East End man is growing
more and more deaf, and greatly dis
likes to admit it. He makes brave
pretense of understanding what is said
to him, and this frequently entails
amusing mistakes.
Not long ago neighbor met him and
said:
Perhaps you haven't beard about
the agreeable visitor that arrived at
our house yesterday Ia fine baby boy
"a perfect cherub?
The deaf man smiled PLEASANTLY and
replied:
20. we have lots of EN- at our house.
My wife gets them by the bushel
Stews 'em, you know. and puts 'eln up.
She put up more than 40 cans this sum-
mer. Yes, indeed"
why said the bewild-red neigh
Dor, what do you think said p
''Yes, she likes the red kind best, >
continued the afflicted ci izen. ''Says
they amt SO tough. Is yours the black
sort ?''
''Sir !" cried the indignant neighbor.
"What are you talking about ?"
The deaf man heard this.
sWhy, cherries, of course" !" he pleas.
antly remarked. "That's what you
said, isn't it p
But the neighbor walked along with.
out explaining.-Cleveland Plain Deal
or
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
The Goal Tariff.

notice that Hon. Henry &. Davis,
John Sheridan and others interested
in West Virginia coal have been be-
sieging the committee on ways and
means of Congress to raise the
tariff on coal from 40 tc 70
cents a ton. When coal can
be produced in the United States
cheaper than in any other coal pro-
ducing nation in the world, regardless
of labor cost; when many companies,
notably the ones ip which Mr.. Davis Is
interested, have been exporting coal
and coke by the thousands of tons un-
der the 40 cent tariff. it IS a very peril
nent subject of inquiry to know why a
rs cent tariff is wanted. No coal comes
to this country from abroad except.
perhaps, a little to some of the New
England seacost towns, and that IS OF
very poor and unserviceable quality.
In fact, if there were no tariff at all,
foreign coal could not be imported ex-
cept at a loss. 1t is well understood
by all who have examined into the
subject that competition between for
eign coal and domestic coal is not pos
sible because of the cheaper produc-
tion of American coal. It is beyond
comprehension how an argument can
be advanced in favor of tariff on coal
when it is fact universally known
that coal is subject of export, and
has been for a number of years, from
the United States to Cuba and Mexico,
and possibly by water to the Pacific
| coast.
The people who are clamorlng for
more and higher tariff usually make
the hypocritic plea that they wish
! higher tariff in order that the wages
of working people may be increased
This idea might afford Congress an
opportunity to test the sincerity of
employers. If it be true, as the pre-
tense is made, that higher tariff
means higher wages, why not make
any increased tariff tnat may be agreed
upon contingent upon the payment O
greater wages Such legislation would
be new departure. an unprecedented
thing in law making, but it would be
right. and would, moreover, put to
real test the pretended friendship o
the employer for his employes.-Dail.
Sentinel, Parkersburg, W. Va.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
Successful X-Ra7 Experiment.

By the help of X-rays, under the
treatment of DIR. David Orr Edison,
John F.. Martin, blind for nine years,
can now distinguish a color. For the
first time since his daily treatment was
begun, a week before, Martin was
able Monday to distinguish that
the radiance of the Crookes tube was
"a sort of green"
When DIR. Edison first subjected Mar
tin to the treatment the result was
that Martin simply saw something
brighter than was discernible by the
faint sense through which for decade
he has been able to distinguish day
from night.
The whole progress of the treatment
thus far tends to prove the verify OF
DIR. David Orr Edson's theory, as shar-
ed by his brother, DR.. Cyrus Edison
that the X-rays will gradually accom-
plish for the atrophied optic nerve
what massage has done for atrophiec
limbs and muscles.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
Around the World.

Charles A. J. Brouard, editor of Gi
Bias. of Paris. reached New Orleans
Sunday on his way around the world
on a wager that he could make the triI
around the world in eleven months
working his way and leaving Paris
without any resources except his ma
tive wit and five francs in money. he
will go from New Orleans to New York,
whence he will sail for France. Mr.
Brouard says that he has had very
hard time of it. He left Paris on Feb
ruary 25 last and followed the follow
ing route: Overland via Germany,
Bavaria, Austria. Hungary, Roumania,
Turkey, Armenia, Persia. Australasia
Siberia, to the Pacific coast and Japan
He spent twenty one days in Yeko
hama and sailed via the Northern
Pacific Company for Victoria. b. G.;
t'upnce overland to San FreHcisen
which city he reached on election day.
He then went via Ell Paso into Mexico,
to Chihuahua. to Mexico, to Vera Cruz,
thence by steamer to Monterey, to
Palmpico. to San Antonia, to Houston,
to Galveston, to New Orleans.
Mr. Brouard says that he was twice
attacked and robbed in Asia, and that
many time during the long trip he
has despaired of ever seeing La Belle
France again. Now, however, he feels
that his task is almost finished, and
has no doubt of being able to get to
Paris by midnight of the 25th of this
month, although he has not the money
now to pay his hotel bill in the Cres-
cent City.
He has earned money as he Travelled,
he says, by all sorts of work. from
making illustrations to shoveling coal,
and while he is to get a liberal share
of the wager made by two friends o1
his on the result Of the trip he does
not want any more globe trotting with
out money.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
Enormous Exports Of Apples.

Up to the first of this year shipments
of apples from Atlantic ports were up
wards of 2,175,000 barrels. The bulk
of these went to British consumers,
only about 5000 barrels being sent to
other countries. These enormous ex
ports have been quite disastrous to
British markets. Supplies at ports OF
entry have been so heavy and prices
so low that exporters lost heavily on
shipments made late in the year. Dur
ing the guilt American apples sold very
low, one Glasgow firm reporting large
quantities sold at from one to four
shillings, or 25 cents to 81. per barrel
Considering the quality of the fruit
exported these prices are much lower
than the market prices on this side OF
the water
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
The Discovery Saved His Life.

Mr. G. Caillouette, Druggist, Beaversville, ILL.,
says: ITO DIR. Kings New Discovery owe my
life. Was taken with La Grippe and tried all
the physicians for miles about, but Of no avail
and was given up and told could not live,
Having DIR. Kings New Discovery in my store ]
sent for bottle and began it's use from the
first dose began to get better. and after using
three bottles was up and about again. 1t ii
worth its weight in gold. We won't keepstore
or house withoutit." Get q free trial at B. F
Hughes Drug Store.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
And now that you have gradual,

And now that you have graduated
from college, Tom, what do you expect
to do? asked his pretty cousin.
shall study law, he r piled gravely.
But isn't that profession. very much
overcrowded, Tom?
Possibly it is, but that is not my
fault. In this world we must all look
out for number one. As / said, shall
study law, and those who are already
in the profession must take their
chance.
The following request for informa-
tion comes from CORES pendent who
"encloses his card"
Dear Mat:
have just returned from Tampico
and find the service of the Central
up to the same high standard as on
my former trip. Do you know why a
certain party who accepted a pass and
then kicked because the third class
passengers were not provided with
Pullmans, and the mosquitoes all shot
kbefore his arrival has ceased his sug-
gestions as to how the management
should handle great railway?
TOMMY.
Yes, Tommy, know. al 4 so do many
other people, that the author of those
attacks and criticisms was metaphor
cally speaking, laid across the knee of
the management and re buke admin
istered that smarts even ), ct.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
Oyer.Fat and Half Fat GattIe.

The London Live Stock Journal says
editorially: "It is quite noticeable that
the cattle offered at the Christmas
market were not nearly SO big and fat
as they used to be- The public will
not now buy over fat meat at any time,
and feeders have been quick to adapt
their stock to the altered taste. Neat,
level, well-shaped, fine-boned beasts.
in moderate condition and of nice
quality, were sought after. and other
descriptions were neglected. Because
the heavy, fat animals that used to be
seen were absent, some of the specta-
tors concluded that the stock were not
as good as usual The fact is that they
were better, and, moreover, they were
more cheaply produced"
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
He Was a Natural Kicker.

After breakfast, when half-a-dozen
of us were settling our bills and maxi
ing ready to take bus for tie depot, a
man who had kept in the background
stepped up, to the desk and said to the
landlord:
'.Sir, you had a wretchedsupperl last
night !"
II didn't hear any complaints" /" was
the reply. ''Sorry if you did not find
things all right"
| s'And it was miserable room you
gave me, eir-a miserable loom."
| mo. As is one of our best rooms,
wish you had spoken last night"
| "And it was wretched bed, sir-tht
worst bed l ever saw in a hotel"
Is it possible! Why, it's new hal
Mattress
"And, SIR" pursued the guest as he
sawed the air with his right arm, ''tht
breakfast which I have just finished
was an imposition-a meal which NJ
ditch digger would be satisfied WITH
"You don't say % grasped the lano
/ lord. "If you are not satisfied, an
sorry indeed. Under the circumstan
ces will take nothing from you"
.Sir! What is the amount OF my IN
debtedness ?''
.sWhy. it would have been $3.50. bu
under the circumstances"
tOnly $2.5O!''
: "That's all sir, but under the cir
: .Sir p shouted the guest as he arose
81 demand that you make my bill $3
: And here is the money, sir, and sha
never stop at your house again"
The landlord looked at him and turI
ed pale as he made several unsucces'
/ full efforts to speak. Finally he maj
} aged to whisper: .sFor the lords sa
: what k ind of man are you anyh how!
! "a kicker. sir-a natural kicker
t replied the guest. s'and your oinnlbr
/ is now FIVE minutes late and II l mli
the train I'll sue for $4,000 damages.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
Cure For Headache.

AS remedy for all forms of Headache Elec-
trio Bitters has proved to be the very best. 1t
effects permanent cure and the most dreaded
headaches yield to it's influence. We urge all
who are afflicted to procure bottle, and give
this remedy q fair trial. In cases of habitu,
consti patton Electric Bitters cures by giving
the needed tonic to the bowels, and few cases
long resist the use of this medicine. Try it
once. Fifty cents and sl.OO ut Hughes Drng
Store.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
RUMOURDs.
The CrOaIE er

The CrOaE er.
Things amt what they used to be; the world
amt half as bright;
There amt such suns by daytime-such
meller moons by night;
Oats was growin' taller; corn was ten foot
high,
An money don't buy half as much as money
used to buy
Things amt what they used to be; goods
amt half as cheap:
Haryests amt as plentiful as them we use
to reap;
Not much use in livin now. an kinder think
I'd die
If 'twarn't that these new funerals come SO
amazin high
Frank l.. Stanton.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
CHURCH DIRECTORY.

First Presbyterian Church, on Frederick 81
between New and Market streets, services
II a. m. and p. m. Pastor. Rev. A. M. Fraser
Second Presbyterian church corner Freder.
lex and Lewis streets. Services at II q. m
and 8. Pastor. Rev. ]. NJ. Wells.
Emmanuel Episcopal Church, worship on
West Frederick st. Services at II a. m. and
p. m,, Rector. Rev. r. c. Jett.
Trinity Episcopal church, Main street, be-
tween Lewis and Church streets. Services at
IL a. M, and Sp. m. Rector, Rev. W. Q. Hull
linen
United Brethren chrfel, Lewis street, be
tween Main and johnson streets. Services at
IL a. m and p. m. Pastor, Rev. s. X
Wine.
Methodist church, Lewis street, between
Main and Frederick streets. Services at II a
N. and p. m. Pastor, Rev. ]. H. Boyd, D. D
Christ Evangelical Lutheran church Lew
is street, between Main and Frederick streets
Services at II a. m. and p m. Pastor. Rev
H. F. Shealy.
Baptist church, corner sialn and W shing
ton streets. Services at II a. m. and p. M
Pastor, Rev. IL. L. Wood.
st. Francis Roman Catholic, North Augusts
street, Mass at and 1880 a. m. vespers and
benediction Of Most Blessed Sacrament Ut
p. M. Pastor. Rev. Father Mcverry.
Young Mems Christian Association, corner
Main and Water streets. Services at p. m
| Sunday. Geo. A. Overdorf, Secretary.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
Rucklen,s Arnica Salye.

The best Salve in the world for cuts, bruises
ulcers, salt rheum. fever sores, tetter chapped
hands, chilbIains,corns, and all skin eruptions
and positiyelygcQres piles, or no pay required
tits guaranteed - give perfect satisfaction OF
money refunded. Price CSC per box. For sale by
g. +, Hughes. apr S-lyr
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
Woman

Woman-God bless her. the queen Of
all creation.
Woman-Tbe tyrant we love, the
friend we trust.
Woman-The sweetest creature the
Lord ever made.
Woman-The source of help. happi-
ness and heaven.
Woman-She needs no eulogy; she
speaks for herself.
Woman-Once there was a woman,
sir, and here she is.
Woman-A creature "nobly planned,
to warn, to comfort and command
Woman-The fairest work of the
great Author; the edition is large, and
no man should be without a copy.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
The Plague.

BOMBAY, Jan. 14-It is estimated
that over 500 GOO persons, comprising
more than half the population of the
city, have fed to the country to escape
the plague. The streets are practical
ly deserted, and business is practically
at standstill. The doctors are begin
ming to fear treating plague patients
lest they contract the disease and many
of the native doctors have fled. About
900, 600 persons are encamped at And
neri. but they will not be able to re
main there long. owing to scarcity of
water and the uusanitary conditions
prevailing. The cemeteries of the city
are filled with the dead. Up to last
night the official statistics showed that
there were 1894 cases of the plague
and 2, 1853 deaths from the disease.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
A Singular Death.

The tragic death of Miss Ellen Beach
Yaw occurred on Tuesday night at
Binghamton, N. Y. She was singing
before an audience, and, in reaching
the high notes for which her voice was
famous, the jugular vein in her throat
burst and she bled to death on the
stage before her hearers. Miss Yaw
was able to reach the highest note of
any cantatrice in the world. which was
due to a peculiar formation of her
throat. In straining to reach this note
muscles in her throat we're pressed
against the jugular vein, and injured
this by abrasion until the membrane
was worn through causing hemorrhage.
She had been warned by the best vocal
masters what the result would be if she
persisted in singing SO high. but the
warning was not needed. Miss Yaw
was born In Boston. Erie county, N.
Y. and was about thirty years of age.
Track laying is going forward on the
railway between Taku and Pekin, Chi
ma. The line is 80 miles long. Materi-
al is delivered at Taku, the seaport
end of the road. Ties to the number
of 100000 are being shipped froln the
Pacific coast of the United States, and
include fir and redwood They cost 7(
cents each delivered at Taku. Russian
and Japanese ties are said to be of in
ferior quality, and hence preference
has been given to the American article
The road when completed will b,
equipped with a swagger Pullman
drawing room car.
Affidavits as to personal characte
may be necessary to allay suspicion o
to attract the simple minded; but wha
has the manufacturers private char
acter to do with the efficacy of his SO
called "cure ?'' Ely's Cream Balm de
pends solely upon its reputation o
years as a successful cure for catarrl
in all its stages. 1t is absolutely fre
from mercury or any other drug inju
rinus to the system. Being apple
directly to the diseased membrane
affords instantaneous relief and wi
effect perfect cure Of catarLh.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21

Friend-Are those game cocks :? Su-
burbanite-Yes an improved breed.
Friend-W hat is their strong poiit ?
Suburbanite-They crow at each other
ferociously their time arrang-
ing the preliminaries. as it were-but
they never fight-Puck.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
Missed Each Other,

Mrs. Gabb (who spent last summer
on her aunt's farm)-I did not meet
you at any of the summer resorts, Mrs.
Gabb.
Mrs. Gabb (who summered on her
uncle's farm)-No o; and, by the way,
I don't remember meeting you in
Paris.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
An Inquiring Mind.

Bangs-From the west. eh?
Eyes, sir; from Chicago"
'.Ah! Indeed! Ispent several months
in Chicago. Been there long?"
''Yes, sir. am member of the city
council. ~
"You don't say SO? What street is
your saloon on ~
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21

r ARGE FARM FOR SALE.-A splendid
IL farm In Augusta county, the richest
quarter Of the Valley of Vtrgin1r. containing
about $40 Acres. has on it good new eight room
dwelling, two now barns covered with slate
and painted, other new outbuildtngs two Or
tion with turnpike leading to station. in splen-
did state of cultivatIod. fine spring, plenty OF
timber, in sight of churches, mills, stores, etc
years time. Has on it nov 13 head horses, 80
CATTLE 40 hogs, lao sheep. 10 mich cows, raised
1000 bushels OF corn last year, other grain In
proportion. Write for full description to this
ONCE.
Staunton spectator and vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1896-1916, 1897-01-21
PILES! PILES! PILES!

Dr. WilliamslndianP Pile Ointment will cure
Blind Bleeding, liberated and Itching Piles II
oats SIS a poultice, gives instant relief DR..
Williams Indian Pile Ointment is prepared
only for Piles and Itching of the private parts,
sold by druggists, sent by mail for SOC and 81
per box. WILLIAMS MEG ",
mar2U-ly Cleveland, Ohio.
The record-union., 1897-04-14
While Being Examined for Insanity
by Judge Ogden.
Terribly Mutilates His Throat and
Respiration Organs With a Hat
pin, But 1t is Thought That His
Effort at Seif-DestructiOn Will Not
be a SucCess-The Scene in the
Courtroom a Remarkable One.

OAKLAND, April 13.-W. c. Grebe,
a maniac, jabbed a hatpin down his
throat at noon to-day while being ex-
amined for insanity in the courtroom
of Judge Ogden. It was thought for
a time that he had succeeded in kill
ing himself, for his throat and the or
gans of respiration We're terribly mu-
tilated. but it is now believed that he
Will recover.
Grebe fought with all the despera-
ton of insanity to keep the officers
from removing the fragments of the pin
from his throat, and it was only after
he had become unconscious from
strangulation that they were removed.
The scene in the courtroom was
remarkable one. Grebe was very vio-
lent when brought in by Jailer Lane
and fought to free himself. He begged
for poison or weapon that he might
kill himself, and could not be quoted.
The hearing had about closed, and
Judge Ogden had issued the order for
the confinement of the prisoner in Ag-
news, when Grebe asked permission TO
kiss his wife, a tall, handsome woman,
who sat with him during the hearing.
As he advanced to her he suddenly
seized her about the neck and tried to
bite her. She screamed in terror and
struggled to free herself. Grebe
clutched at her hat and tore it from
her head AS he did so he saw the long
pin that had held the hat on her head.
In an instant it was in his mouth, and
he was forcing it down his throat. The
jailer and bailiffs seized him and
hurried him from the courtroom.
The record-union., 1897-04-14
WHITE THE WINNER.
Gets the Decision i'm His Bout With
Eddie Curry.

NEW YORK, April 13.-Tommy
White of Chicago and Eddie Curry of
this city We're the principals in the
star bout of twenty rounds at the
Broadway Athletic Club arena tonight.
The referee decided in favor of the
Chicago man.
Kid Mccoy, who arrived here last
Saturday from South Africa, was intro
duced by Announcer Harvey, who stat
ed that Mccoy was willing to meet
Creedon in the ring before the club Of
fering the best inducements. Just as
Mccoy stepped into the ring Creedon
followed him, and the two shook
hands. Tom O'Rourke then announced
that he would give $4,000, or 30 per
cent of the receipts of the house, for a
go between these middleweights.
AS soon as O'Rourke made this offer
Charley White, who trained Corbett
for his recent fight with Fitzsimmons,
jumped up and said: Il offer 81, 200, ,"
and Eugene Comiskey went him a thou
sand better, shouting out, I'm give So
000"
Neither White nor Comiskey would
say what clubs they represented, but
insisted that offers would be made
good
The record-union., 1897-04-14
HUNTER MAY WIN.
Gold Democrats Will No Longer Break
Quorums i'm the LEGISLATURE.

FRANKFORT (Ky.), April 13. - The
gold Democrats at a caucus held to-
night decided to break no more quorurns
in the balloting for United States Sem
ator. They admit that Hunter is liable
to be elected now, but they say that
the Blackburn men, who refuse to sup
port Martin, will be responsible for the
result. II Hunter is not elected after
a few trials they will demand that he
retire. They are determined that if
they cannot elect a. gold Democrat they
will help elect a gold Republican.
The Grand Jury is not ready to re-
port.
The State Executive Committee of
the silver Democracy to-day called a
State Convention to be held in this city
on June I'd for the nomination of a
Clerk of the Court of Appeals The
committee reiterates its approval of the
national platform adopted at Chicago,
but is more liberal in the provisions of
the call with reference as to who shall
participate in county and State con-
VentiOnS.
The record-union., 1897-04-14
NEW JERSEY ELECTIONS.
The Democratic Candidates Generally
Successful.

TRENTON On. j., April Is. - The
following details of the elections in
New Jersey have been received:
Newark-The Democrats gained con-
troll of the Common Council
Orange-Democrats swept the city,
carrying every office.
Paterson = Ex-senator Hinchcliffe
Oem) elected Mayor by 200.
Hoboken-Lawrence Fagan (Rep)
was elected Mayor by about 500
Dover-George Pearson (Dem) was
elected Mayor by a majority of 20.
Elizabeth-Democrats made a gain of
two on Board OF Education. The Coun-
ell remains about as last year.
Bayonne-Seymour (Dem.) was elect
ed Mayor by 1000 majority.
Asbury Park-Frank L. Tenbroeck
was elected Mayor without opposition.
Passaic-Andrew Mclean (Rep) de-
feated Ruslind Oem) for Mayor by
a large majority, the Republicans
making large gains.