The times., 1897-08-01
SEP JONES AND OTHERS.

! never do think of what happened to
poor Joe Bradshaw without bein' cut up
about it. Every man a Squan Greek who
had fish boat was liar and knowed he
was, and when Joe Bradshaw cum up
| from Absecom and jined the fleet we
'sposed Of Coulse lie was liar like the rest
| of Us. He Was humble man who didn L
| DO much slyea rim and was soft-spoken but
We thought il his way and didn't praise
him fur it. What we hoped fur when he
Jined US was some new lies, as We'd got
purity tired of the old ones an d he didn {
disappnt u.s. One day, when he'd bin out
to take up his lobster pots, he come back to
the wharf to say To half Gozen Of US:
Il should Ike To tell you of a lobster
run across out thar, but I'm afeard
youn think I'm lynn"
''of course we WILL" says Phineas Green
but what OF it?'' We ar all liars here,
and you amt no better nor wuss than the
rest OF Us. Jest draw d long breath and
tell US whCpper."
But Joe Bradshaw wouldn't do il. He
seemed TO be hunt in his feelin's and re-
fused 10 say a word We thought it was
mighty queer in him, and next day when
/ met him alone l says:
Joe, il you'll tell me about that lobster
/ won't say nuthin' to the rest of the crowd
Wen swap lies on the quiet You tell me
bout your lobster and I'll tell You bout
my shark
But I'm no liar says Joe. II never
told lie in Inylife, and l wouldn't tell one
fur all the fish in Squan Bay. If I'm to
tell You about this lobster you've got TO
believe It - f
proinisedT would, though didn 'tintend
TO. and he told me that lac saw a lobster
as big as cider bari "a reg1ar old socker
who must hev bin crawlln' around when the
battle OF Bunker Hill was fit. l tried T.,
get him to take off some and say the lob
ster was no bigger'n a beer keg, but ne
stuck night to the size aud wouldn't abate
jot. You never saw n man more airnest
and i almost believed he was teIlin' the
truth. When told the gang about the big
lobster they was nightly pleased.
That's the biggest kind of a lie" saws
Plato White, "'but it's a new one and we
orter rejoice. Wen encourage him to keen
on Z"
That's what we did Every time he
went out TO his pots we anxiouslv inouirad
after that lobster and appeared to be powar.
fully interested. We made it ND tn run
ACROSS the varmint ourselves, and to he
amazed at its size, and Bradshaw didn't
exactly know how to take US Now and
then he'd come in to saw he'd Seen tho
lobster agin, and we'd wink at each other
ana DAM webster Brown would say.
res seen him myself yesterday ar
ternoon, and of all the sockin' ole Holsters
IN this Atlantic Ocean he takes the cake
why, bows, the claws on that critter ar
ionger'n my arm, and Jest about as bip
around, and his eyes stand ont like peeled
onions AS to how old he is the Lord only
knows, but if he hain't seen 200 wars
hope TO never bring up another oyster "
Then we'd wink all around ap1n and
Noah Wilkins would heave a sigh and ada.
And when / was down to the bell
buoy last Chewsday I must n seen tba+
same lobster, but he was so powerfuI
big that took him for two dead nor.
poises lashed together / started IN pit
a tiuSer look at him, but he thrashed
around illi he skeert me off. never
was a-feared of nuthin' that walked or
S"an1' Dut wouldn't hev that old lob
ster GIT holt of me fur nobody's SO, ,OOo.m
The story of the lobster got around
'till preacher Thomas felt it his dcotv
to say sunthin'. Joe Bradshaw was n
member Of the church, and allus runp
the rThursdayevenin'p pra yerrneetin,s
One eyenin' the preacher called on Joe and
said:
Brother BRADSHAW W, how big do YOU saw
that lobster is?''
As big as cider bar'l," saws Joe.
You don't mean naiIkeg?n
No, sir. I've seen him five or six times.
and he's as big as cider bari, while
reckon his claws at four feet long"
You won't abate any from that?s
Net an inch, sir. I'm teIlin' the solemn
truth, and the Lord knows I am, and If
] ahated I'd be a liar"
The preacher fused aruond fur awhile.
not believin' the story, and yet not wantin'
TO call Joe liar, and finally he said:',
Brother Bradshaw, perhaps you hadn't
better ring the prayer meetin' bell no more
till that big lobster has been cotched The
sarvice OF the Lord and the saryice of
satan ar fur, fur apart
That must hurt Joe's feelin's. fur we
saw a change in him, and artcr that he
had no more TO say about the lobster
We tried 10 joke with him but he was
sorter sad and humble and wouldn't
mind us. Things went along fur about
a month, and one day when he went out
TO his pots his boat was found driftin,
about and him missin'. We turned out |
to search, and we finally found the BODY |
IN the grass on the edge OF Cat Island.
Thar was sunthin' tangled up with it, |
and that as the big lobster Yes. sir.
hat ole eocker of lobster was thar.
and it took three men to manage him, and |
he was sold in Philadelphia for $50
Mebhe he wasn't quite as big as q cider
bari, but he was clus on to it, and his |
claws was strong huff to splinter an oar |
Joe Bradshaw was right all the time |
he was no liar. and he had sawn w hat he
had sawn. We had called him a liar, the |
preacher had believed he lied and the hun |
of Squan Greek had said the truth wasn't
n him. 1t was. though, He was the |
1nly one who hadn't lied, and nebhe it |
vas the Lords doIn's that he was removed /
Q better land and aw ay from bad in
luences