Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1897-02-16
FROM PARIS, MAINE, TO PARIS,
FRANCE.
No. l3.
ON THE WAY TO KENILwoRTH.
(rrom our Special Foreign Correspondens)
LONDON. ENGLAND.

(rrom our Special Foreign Correspondent
LONDON, ENGLAND.
"The splendor falls on castle walls,
And snowy submits old In story;
The long Hight shakes across the lakes.
And the Wild cataract leaps In glory"
There are many very delightful excur'
sions FROM London, but the most en-
chanting, long-looked-for, long-to-re'
membered OF all, was the visit TO kenil-
worth Castle, the scene OF Sir Walter
SCOTS novel ''kenilworth." In order to
do this in one day, for It Is 100 miles frou
London, we must get up with the early
bird, and breakfast by gas-light, and hie
US to the underground station, which We
found by following our nOse"-which
was quite distance ahead, we admit
and NOT by following the advice OF the
policeman who directed US. The London
policeman is a character. He Is not ex-
actly bubbling over with delight to serve
you. AS this conversation will show.
"Is this Gloucester Roadg"
mo"
"Is that It over theres"
NO"
"what street is this:''
"Cromaell."
"Is that Gloucester Road over thereg''
NO"
"weil, look here, where Is Gloucester
Road ststiouy'
"rhree minutes walk to the left"
Which we found Was ten minutes
walk 10 the right. He seemed much sur
prised TO think We wanted to know where
Gloucester Road was. Perhaps II is not
to be wondered at that he answers In
monosyllables, for he has 10 wear hel-
met fastened on by strap that goes un-
der his nose, or In his mouth. IL his hat
Is knocked off his nose must go too. His
coat has long tails, full at the bottom,
and belt tight around the waist, which
reminds YOU OF the costume OF ballet
girl. lie does as well as could be expect
ed OF a man who only gets $500 week
without the privilege OF clubbing people,
for they are not allowed TO use their
cl lubs, except In case of life and death
IL they do they are liable to be sent To
prison for one To ten years.
In our country, IL Is the rest OF Us VINO
have To exercise our ingenuity TO Keep
out Of Jail, but In Englandit Is the police
man. Neither Is he allowed to carry a
revolver, but he is allowed TO take tips,
the usual amount being four cents. You
can't imagine what our Boston police
man would do II YOU offered him four
cents for telling YOU where certain
street ia, unless IL Is TO swear because II
Is not five-the price of drink. But
here they say THANK YOU" as does
everybody. II Is the one phrase on
everybody's tongue. No matter whether
you do them a great favor or threaten ia
break their necks, it's THANK you,
just the same.
when our walk IL ended, We enter a
long, arched railway station, and 60
down a long flight OF stairs, where the
man at the gate punches your ticket.
which YOU don't have to be bothered
with again, till the end of the journey,
when the man at the gate takes IL. You
are now underneath the street, where all
the light comes through n glass roof.
that opens into the road above, and Is
there enclosed by an iron fence. We
here ask for the train for Tottenham
Court Road, which We are told by the
guard Is the second that comes along.
When IL comes we are about To board II,
when our attention Is attracted by a
party of American gentlemen, apparent
ly going To the same place, and whom
we hear ask IL that Is the right train.
Some one inside says. NO" and we
wait for fully five trains more, before
the right one comes, which we don't
know then. unless We ask some one who
has nothing to do with the railway
trains. We are fortunate enough 10 get
in the same carriage with the aforesaid
party, who are evidently not in love with
the underground system, which We will
let one OF them describe:
There are things about this under.
ground system that you can't help MOTTO
ing. In the first place the light don't
hurt your eyes with It's glare. In the
second, II you've got any moths around
your clothes, they are going TO leave.
This smoke would drive any well-bred
moth out OF the middle Of sn oak plank.
1, NAV kill the man, but II will get a
move on the moth. You might as we'll
try TO breathe in gas retort. But what
YOU come In here for Ia, is recreation, not
breath. You will smell like fitch Of
bacon when you get out, IL you get out
at all. Still you won't know IL, because
YOUR lungs will be coated with smoke
by that time, 10 say nothing Of the cin-
ders and dust and things you have in
hailed.
Then, il you are alone, and some cut
throat gets into the same compartment,
he can carve YOU up in the most elegant
style. lie won't have to hurry, so he
can make a good job Of 1t. Should the
porter neglect TO close the door, 1t will
Nv open, and 60 scooting down the plat
form, knocking people down like nine
pins.
"You are bound to rest In one OF these
cars, because you can't do anything else.
TO look out of the window for.
"When you come to station you
might imagine it was the guards duty
TO call it out. Not so. In America they
seem to find that sort Of thing necessary,
but the English are so smart they know
by instinct when they get to the right
place. As matter of form, seemingly,
you will notice little board at each end
Of the station with the name of the place
on it. But you never can see 1t, no mat
ter how much you hunt for 1t, for 1t
is never in the place you expect. Oh,
it's great old system-knOcks the New
York elevated silly"
By this time we have reached the sta
tion where we wish to get off, and have
a walk OF some minutes, so we ask the
first policeman we see where Euston
station Is. 81 don't know, Madam" he
SAYS, so We walk TO the next corner, and
looking around for another policeman,
we accost him with the same question.
II don't know, Madam, you've asked me
that once before" OF course we humbly
beg his pardon, and keep on walking till
We see another, and as we see no re-
semblance to the other two, We conclude
there can't be trinity, so we ask this
one. II don't know. Madam, you've
asked me that question twice before"
Thinking TO get even with him, we say,
"My friend, you are laboring under a
delusion. It was two other women who
asked you that question, and not US at
all, for If you are the only policeman In
London we are not the only wOman."
We succeed at last in finding some one
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