Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1897-11-25

as TO be the last man 10 co. On TWO
evenings he detained me till ten o'clock
telling stories, and, as l began to get
suspicious of his intentions, | sought
advice Of Mr.. Baker.
On the afternoon of the 30th Mr..
Thompson dropped in and passed jokes
with Mr.. Baker for half an hour, and
we heard great deal of laughing in the
private Office. At eight o'clock in the
evening the postmaster had about
So, 900 in our safe, and the amount al
together was about $4,000. 1t was a
dark and rainy evening, and there were
so few customers in the store that let
the clerks go home. At nine o'clock, as
expected and counted on, Mr.. Thomp-
son arrived. 1t was walk of five blocks
from his hotel, and he would not have
come out in the rain, except that he
was expecting important letters. lie got
none, and the post Office closed after his
inquiry. AS he came through the store
1 was all alone, and there was no doubt
in my mind that he was pleased to find
things thus. He took seat on the
counter and began smoking and asking
me to guess various conundrums, and
at half-past nine o'clock the streets
were quiet and the hour had arrived
for him to show his hand. sat In a
chair facing him and only few feet
away. OF a sudden, and while he was
smiling and laughing, he put his hands
on the counter and leaped forwards and
landed full upon me. was carried
backwards to the floor, and he had his
hand on my throat and his knee on my
breast before l could put out finger.
"Be quiet and sensible, now!" he eau
toned. 81 am Mr.. Thompson. Some
times ] am funny-sometimes not.
There is no funny business about this.
If you keep quiet, | shan't hurt you. If
you don't, I'll use you mighty rough!"
l had no idea of struggling with him.
lie took from his pocket pieces of rope
and bound my arms and my ankles,
and when he had finished said:
"I'm after the money in the safe, of
course, and of course shall get it. 1t
viii save time and trouble, however, If
you will give ME the word. If you are
obstinate about it l may have to hold
a lighted match under your nose"
refused him any answer, and after
minute he passed into the private Office
and began working at the safe. Icould
hear but not see him. He saw that all
the doors were locked before he left me,
and on such a night as that had lit
tie fear of being disturbed He took
the list of 20 words l had given him
and started in on the combination.
lie had tried eight of them, when MIR.
Baker and two policemen suddenly rose
up from behind screen, each with a
pistol in hand, and MIR, Baker called out,
in great good nature;
"Ah, there, you funny Mr., Thompson,
but this is an unexpected pleasure! |
was just dying to hear one of your fun
ny stories, but hardly thought you'd
call at such late hour!"
Mr. Thompson was struck dumb for
moment, but he was a man of cheek
as well as of humor, and, after catch
ing his breath, he answered:
THAT you, Baier-ha! ha! ha! Did
you ever hear the story Of the man who
dreamed he was horse"
mo, never did. If you are feeling
we'll tomorrow, come around and tell
it. know it must be funny-ha! ha!
ha! Were you trying to work that COM
bnationW
"Why, yes, was trying, but have had
no luck. You seem to have expected
me- here tonight"
YES, hal hal ha! Say, Thompson,
doesn't the situation strike you as rath-
CT funny?"
YES, devilish funny-ha! ha! hal"
Same here. shall miss you more
than | can tell. If you have time be-
fore you go to state prison, wish you
would write me out few of your best
jokes. The one you were telling me yes
tcrday was regular corker-ha! ha!
hal"
And for a quarter of an hour more the
two continued to joke each other, while
one of the policemen came out into the
store and released me. didn't feel
very mirthful over the affair, but Mr..
Baker slapped me on the back and eX-
claimed:
Charles, my boy, you mustn't hold
any spite against Mr.. Thompson. He's
very funny man, and if he could only
stay in Greendale for few weeks long
err I'd get fat laughing over his jokes
-ha! la! ha! Say, Thompson, tell him
the story of the old maid and the COB
lin-ha! ha! hal"
IL don't feel as funny as usual, for
some reason" replied Thompson. THE
fact is, l think I've got myself boxed
up"
The funny Mr.. Thompson took his
dose like a man. He had played his
hand and lost, and he was not the man
to kick about it. He attempted no de-
Tense, but said he was probably walk
ing in his sleep. He received a sentence
of seven years, and before he was taken
away Mr.. Baker went to the Jail to see
him and say:
"Well, Thompson, any new jokes or
conundrums before you are off?
Nothing to-day" was the reply.
"Say, we used to swap some mighty
GOOD things, didn't we?-ha! ha! ha!