The evening times., 1897-03-03

to know byintuitlon where ever yuody wants
to get Oft
inquired what class Of people are
most troublesome to the conductor and
elected the following replies.
One said, why. it's six OF one AMI
half dozen OF the otHeT-thc cranks ale
equally divided"
Another some think old people give
trouble, but I would rather deal with the
most exaCting old lady than with one Of
those smart dudes
One Jolly. pleasant-faced man said Il
don't have trouble with anybody. because
! keep my temper and laugh when things
get cTosSways; II a passenger says thing
is green, let it lie green. even il it, black;
MY day passes quickly. and I'm always
happy
In the early part OF the day the depart
mcnt clerk son the warpath. and sometimes
gives the conductors temper good discip-
line Nine O'Clock is too early, anyway,
to go to work-he oversleeps-has no time
to eat breakfast. and must run like the wind
in order to catch a car which Will enable
him to fall into his seat at the tapping Of
the office hell; the nIaledictions of a nght-
eous man are poured down on the head of
the conductor who whirls past the corner,
and fails to see that frantic wave of the
umbrella two squares away.
There are others who start from home in
good time, and settle themselves comfort
ably in the car for few minutes shop talk
witha neighbur Int the course ofaconversa.
tinn between Brown and Jones, sucn frag-
nents as these float to the ears OF the pas
sengers:
I'm afraid shan't be able to hold on
''But If Mckinley holds to his views in
regard to civil service, you know"
'He-here- conductor I'm past my COZ
ner; why didn't you put me off?''
Next corner sir" yells the 'imper-
turbable." while Jones, In his haste. eX-
ecutcs q double somersault from the car
toward his office
The old lady who has so little leisure
that she reads her magazine on her vay
to work, often goes to the end OF the line
The conductor is genuinely sorry that she
will be late; yes, he ought TO have known
where to stop for her; she has ridden on
his car before; ne apologies profusely for
what he has not done, and helps her Oh the
return car.
When the clerks are Quoted down at
means over rAnavalancheo ofmarket baskets
sweep down on him to be lifted aboard;
some of them so full that the fragrant
cabbages and onions creep out to vegetate
on the car floor The hours from to IL,
and to 6, are ordinarily the busiest
OF the day; on Sunday the church trip
makes traffic brisk.
During conventions or large gatherings
of any description, though extra men and
cars are put on, the conductors duties
are quadrupled; yet despite this fact and
the difficulty he finds in cutting his way
into human wall, which resists his pas
sage through it, few rides are stolen; his
ability to keep up so well with the number
who board the car would seem miraculous,
If we did not know that 1t i 3 due as much
to the high average OF honesty among
as to his alertness.
Attempts are occasionally made to
pass off an expired transfer. A man viii
obtain his transfer, go away for several
hours and returning board the intersecting
car; he is very indignant, too, at being
compelled to pay another fare A con-
ductor frequently advances the fare to
one who enters the car and finds to his
that his pocket Is empty.
In most cases the favor is promptly re-
turned, but one or two instances were
rited in which the parties were never heard