The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1897-11-26
ALL TANGLED UP.
Lamentable Effects of Lawsuit on "a
Southern Community.

Lamentable Effects of a Lawsuit on
Southern Community.
Woodworking, mentlegen Dice
nay" politely saluted pale, intel
lectual-looking man, as he passed
the Ruralville tavern, on the porch
of which the landlord and drummer
were conversing:
Great Scott! What on earth is the
matter with that mani" asked the
commercial traveller in astonish-
ment when the passerby was out of
hearing. THAT is the most pecu-
liar impeachment / ever heard of a
man having in his speech. Who is
he, anyhow"
"That is Lawyer Broad head" re-
piled the landlord. "He was the
leading attorney in the case of
Hitchcock vs.. Hotchkiss, which was
tried last month, and in repeating
the names of the plaintiff and de-
PENDANT over and over he got his
speech all tangled up, as you no.
ticed, and hasn't been able to get it
! Strengthened out yet"
"Ah! And what was the nature of
| the case?"
"Well, Hitch mean Hotchkiss,
ran store over yonder on the corn
er, where you notice that a building
was burned down, and Hitchcock
bought him out, paying him a sum
in cash for the store, fixtures, good
will and accounts, just as they stood,
all in lump, and when he exam
ined the books he found that Kich-
that is, Hotchkiss, had been keep
| t.Nn. l., t., Il
fashion that he couldn't make head
nor tail of them.
"The merchant has very short
memory, and when he couldn't re-
call customers name he Just
charged the goods to some peculiar
ity in the appearance of the patron,
and as a result he had accounts
against the 'one-eyed man, the
lady who talks fast the queer
looking fellow with the lame dog
and so on. Naturally, there are sew
eral One-eyed men and rapid-spOken
ladies and queer-lOoking fellows in
the vicinity, and Koch-er-er-the
purchaser of the accounts met with
denials of the charges on all sides
when he attempted to make collec-
tons.
"Thereupon he sued Hotchkiss--I
mean the other fellow-and Koch
er-ah THE man he bought from
fought back. He said he had sold
everything just as it stood, and
'm-the purchaser
had no rightful kick coming. Law
yer Broadhead went into the case
with all his might and made thrill
| nnh alnnnnnf -, NH oh
the names of the plaintiff and de-
PENDENT were repeated so often that
he got tangled up till he couldn't say
em straight to save his life. The
jury got all snarled up, too, and
brought in a verdict for Kisscock,
and then tried to change it by say
ing they meant Notebook. The
Judge endeavOred to set them
right and got tangled up himself
and Kitchkissed aud Kickhosed till
he got mad and threw the case out
of court"
"And how did Messrs. Koch-that
is, Kiss-er-eT"-beg the drum
mer.
I why, Koshkick--I should say
Kishkosh," answered the landlord.
Jaw, whatever their COMPOUNDED
names were!" gFowled the drum
mer. How did they finally set
tie it?"
Hish-er-Koek 81 mean Kick
"Pshawl Let's change the sub
iectl"
"All right was just going to
say that the store burned down the
night after the Judge ruled the case
out of court, and most of the cOu-
; tents, including the accounts, were
destroyed. A portion of the goods
were saved, though, and those Law
| yer Broadhead gobbled for his fees.
Looks kinder like rain off in the
' northwest, doesn't it2n-St. Louis
Dispatch.