Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1897-12-24
HOW A LOVER WAS UNDoNE.
A Mean Trick In Which the Girl FAR
ticipated.

A Mean Trick In Which tho Girl Far
ticipated.
War has broken out in a certain
Euclid avenue clearinghouse, ana
all along of maiden fair" the latter
being, in fact, the landlady's daugh-
ter, says the Cleveland Leader. Among
the boarders is highly educated for
elgner who, probably, can knock
greater variety of sounds out Of a
piano in a given time than
any other person in this town.
For several weeks past this gen.
tleman has been in the habit of
lettering in the parlor, after the re-
tirement of the other boarders, and
evoking sweet strains for the delecta-
ton Of the fair girl hereinbefore men,
toned. Those who profess to have OBJ
tanned inside information declare that
he did much signing, considerable gaz-
ing with soulful eyes, and some whis-
perings of airy nothings between
tunes, all OF which was strongly OBJ
jected to by the less-gifted men around
him. Upon various occasions the gen.
tleman from across the water was re-
quested to perform for the benefit of
others beside the landlady's daughter.
but he strongly objected to this. Oc-
casionally he would throw little fit
upon the keyboard for them, but he
positively refused to sing for any one
save the sweet girl, although it was
known that he had a fine voice. At
first the gentleman's attentions to the
landlady's daughter were rather enjoy
ed by her, but they soon became so
fervid that she shrank from them, es-
pecially as she knew that everybody
else in the house was aware Of what
was going on, and was disposed to
regard the whole business as some
thing to be laughed at. So few even
ings ago she intimated to some one
that she would be glad of an opportu-
nifty to rid herself Of the foreigners
attentions, and plot was arranged.
After dinner she was to remain in the
parlor, with her adorer, and ask him
to sing for her, being assured that
something would happen, as soon as
he began, to bring matters to head.
She carried out her part of the pro-
gramme, and. having drawn several
long signs and gazed at her in mute
admiration for long time, the lover
touched the piano for the customary
boom boom-boom, p-r-r-r-r-r amp-amp
amp, and began to sing an amatory
song from the Italian or something
else that nobody in the house. save
himself, could understand. Then, Of a
sudden, there was a fearful racket up
on the stairway. Forty-th ousand tin
cans seemed to be fastened to the tails
Of as many dogs, all of which had been
turned loose at once. The lovers
song became feeble pipe in chaos
Of distracting sounds. It was as II
presidential election night, a boiler
shop, and the entire fire department
had been consolidated and we'll shak-
en- before using. The young man.
face became white and he stopped
singing. whereupon the sweet girl
clapped her hands over her empurpled
visage and rushed from the room. 1t
is alleged that people three blocks
away heard the gentleman gritting his
teeth, after the other racket had sub
sided, and his wrath was in no wise
diminished when he began to under
stand that the girl whom he adored
had been party to the humiliating
ordeal through which he had passed.
At present the piano remains unused,
and an ominous quiet hangs over that
clearinghouse. The foreign gentle
man is still there, and it is understood
that as soon as he can learn the
name of the man who engineered the
plot the latter will be invited to choose
his weapons. This is why some of the
others have ceased to regard it as a
joke.