The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1897-05-09
cnnvright. 1897.

nat M woman must talk much, for as
~. as she does, she will draw her lips
.o,stber in a fashion that's unbecoming
y, wav. | believe this, but in another
.r don't The woman who can talk
well fails in her duty if she does not talk
otten but there are ways of making the
f.,,,nine mouth, which ought to look like
rosebud extremely ugly. There lit
Al, French word 'riante" which. freely
.r,rslated means laughing. and expresses
sxactIv how the mouth of a woman ought
70 look. 1t doesn't mean. however, that a
woman should get in the habit of smirking
and present a continual grin to the mascu-
line world that stares at her Think of
the women whose mouths have interested
vau-There's the woman who is usually
snolzen of as being very firm, and having
decided opinions; she expresses them by
drawing her lips together, so that they
look like the clasp of a steel purse, and
setting her paws as if she We're trying to
rival the best breed of bull pup. That's
the sort of a woman you want to have as
an acquaintance, but not as friend or
sweetheart.
Then. there's the woman-thank good
ness. she's generally English-who has
been told that her teeth are good-so
they are-big, strong, useful and white,
and she parts her lips and smiles with
the amiability and exactly the express
sion Of a rather large horse. If you doubt
me look al any picture of George Eliot.
he rr7bA Ifxrae
q her teeth and her dimples-she opens her
4 mouth to show one and she contracts it
to intensity the other. If you speak to
her about bright woman she asks, right
away. IF you noticed her teeth" If she
Il discusses the heroine of a book she won
ders that the author said nothing about
y her mouth or her dimples, and every &C.
n tress, as far as she is concerned is good
Il or bad, not from the standpoint of art,
4 but from that of the dentist. When she
81 has a Photograph taken she hesitates as
4 to whether she sail show her teeth or her
4 [mples; and she generally compromises
Il b. making a bargain, permitting her TO
have the two styles for very little more
money, and in one she is deeply dimpled,
W.. in the other she smiles until you
feel you can count her teeth.
LIE woman with q. DtduLlIul mouth idS
the pinkest of lips, the whitest of teeth
and the most even, but they simply flash
occasionally when the lips are open, for
after all. there is only one poetical
thought given to teeth, and that is the
comparing them to pearls Pearls amount
TO little, unless they are brought out by
good setting. Just remember that, OH
maid of the teeth and dimples! and when
YOU are about to grin-don't,
81
in the commercial world. Then, too, it
is OF use to make those powder bags,
used by people who refuse to recog-
nize the value of fine face powder,
but who strain at a gnat and swallow
q very enormous camel, by banging
starch bag at their faces and gaining,
as result. something very like the
pictures raved over by the impression
lsts. You know what l mean. Those pic
lures where the sky is a blotch of green,
the grass a pale lavender, and a huge
Jump of pink paint and another of black,
f-present two lovers parting. OF course,
t1e lady is another mans wife. You
Wouldn't know it was two lovers parting,
mless you had that ability to read the
meaning of paint daubs peculiar to this
school of art But to return to starch.
never knew a laundress who wasn't
generous with starcn-in the wrong place.
cay - RtNdl AlduOulld u TIE WdSuAuDS
makes your handkerchiefs and the upper
\ part of your petticoats as stiff as boards,
Nnie your collars are as limp as a de-
/ Heated candidate. Then, there is no such
'aoomlnauon on the earth as a stitfiy
tarched frock. 1t is the joy of the laun-
dress. The girl who wears it may be cool
Chat Is doubtfuD, though she will never
convince the world at large that she is
anything but an aggravating blot on the
landscape.
The muslin froclS adored by the poets.
was, certainly, what the darkies call,
shnky." If 1t had any acquaintance
with the washtub il had none with starch,
consequently, when a heroines sylph-like
form was embraced, the frock didn't rat
ue and announce what was going on to
the whole neighborhood. History, as well
as the Encyclopedia Britannica, tells US
tnat the old woman who invented starch
was huns for a witch. Was there ever
hVing being who denied that starch was a
product of the Evil Spirit? 1t ruins the
temper and makes every woman feel COM
laohp!ace You may have the most beau
tlu pettcoats in the world, but If they're
going TO make a dreadful noise as you
walk by the side OF your adored one. you
"ih yearn TO ask him If he would mind
inmersing you in the first watering cart
mat happens along.
N'A~At aAAN Alt MlelutFE OF IT. dit DpH-
s,sscd of clever demons. About the belt
OF ones pctticoat win be a solid pound OF
u whlle the fri.ls win be entirely free from
H. That part OF the collar which is hid
Ger under the gown will be stiff and calcu-
loted TO hurt your innocent flesh, while
me upper part will be soft ana entirely
lacking IN the stuck-up element. The
worst OF 1t al Is. that. give a laundress a
itetty lawn and lace matinee to do up.
charge her not to let IL see even the out
sue OF starch box. and you can bet nine
70 one that II wiz come back with the saw
lhEs Of years, in the way Of starch, lavish
ca upon II, and when you put it on you
Nhl leel Ike sandwich man. Really
.aerc ought TO be an anti-starch society.
Inink Of all the dear little babies that
alHei from the sticky stun during the hot
tuhihnr' Even tho word itself Is dlsa-
aree'n'a Who likes sturchy people?
VINO hics women who SO up as II they
were s'ar'hed? IL MIR. Mckinley has the
"Va9t laat credit bin with, he will make
ter months.
rather funny, but that clovcrost II
,eU' Mr' Labouchere. credits the morality
~ cur sfandmothers 20 the stiffness or
, w cars IN which they used 10 sit. n
~ VII lake the trouble TO look up the
p'"'.,, "Ies Of some old-fashioned chairs, you
I,i Xxx una Yourself wondering why they