The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1897-10-10


out wonder if anything has suddenly af-
Iected the muscles of his face. The VIII
/ tIepoy ltts his hat about two inches from
rus head and replaces it with a gesture
4 thdt suggests his being wound up like the.
mechanical dolls The average woman
nous and she usually looks sulky, though
/ she may not feel So This is the result
Oh forcing herself never to look pleasant
/ on the street, because of the uuickness
| win which some stray man may capture
| the smile and claim it for his own An
other type of woman may meet the man
| she azores and gives him the most coldly
indifferent bend of the head-a something
Whch bespeaks recognition, but not ap-
pfopatlon. This indifferent bow always
piques man, because the chances are
ne mas been telling some companion that
Here comes a charming woman whom
l Know very well,' and this very slight
nod seems to give him the go by and TO
make his statement appear what his Eng
llsh cousin would call a tarradddle. The
| art or bowling consists in being able to
grade ones bow according to ones ac-
| quaintance. A slight smile and a bend of
the head to those who are well known is
good form, while a perfectly impassive
face and more formal bow to those who
are almost strangers is sufficient. The
gushing bow is more to be avoided than
anything else-in fact, the girl who gushes
VIII in very short time damn herself
socially, and, realizing what has caused
it, will be more than willing to pay a
messenger boy 80 cents an hour to saw
bad words for her because of the position
in which she finds herself through her
own stupidity
When people got back to New York,
they were greeted by a hot spell and then
by cold spell, and, as they say in the
game, the consequence was that every
body caught cold. From the lady in
silks and laces down to that other lady
who halls from Erin in a blanket shawl
there is this one democratic trouble that
is too too common. Entire households are
afflicted with it. Brave men and fair
women bend before it. Who can make
love to a girl who snuf1es? Or who can
admire man with a swollen nose and his
eyes swimming with water? Everybody
has a different remedy. Hot Scotch and
a foot bath is oftenest recommended by
the men, while some sort of a plaster and
black draught, or a Dover's powder or
a large dose of quinine and hot lemonade
are advised by the women folks l don't
approve of women doctors any more than
l do of women lawyers, but like to hear
the amateur exploit her knowledge and try
her doses on some innocent victim For
this reason, and this only, I am willing to
tell the world at large what l advise for a
cold. First, dress your chest in a mus
tara plaster. Wear it until YOU have an
idea how 1t must feel to be in the inferno
While little host of devils direct that all
the nre shall be aimed at
your chest and that alone. Then take
black draught. A black draught is
truthful in its name 1t is as black as the
ace or spades and it tastes and smells
ike a combination of photograph gallery
and the morgue But it's wonderful in IFS
eHect' some people take a bottleful of it
as dose, but they belong to a race of
giants; others consume the half of a hot
tie, but / only advise two tab,espoonfuIs
After the joys of the mustard plaster and
the bliss of the black draught sleep with a
not water bag-let ii be a movable bliss
perambulating around wherever Won NAV
feel chilly. This treatment will cure a cold
ana is the only one 1 recommend under
any circumstances 1t is true that some
people prefer TO have the cold, but thew
are the people who do not really eniov
lie at its fullest. There are always nm
peasant people in this world-people who
don't think just as you do It's like the
good and the bad men-the men we like are
good men, and the men we don't like are
bad men,
1t IS unpleasant when you think YOU are
entertaining people by giving them your
OPINION OF a book to have some fool say:
didn't know you'd ever set up for a
brain?'
1t is unpleasant when you know that
your fox terriers pedigree hasn't a single
par sinister in 1t to have somebody ask.
w mere did you get that cur?"
IL is unpleasant when you've nut all
your money in a well fitting trig cloth
gown to have some man say, "a woman
never seems womanly to me unless she
wears silks and laces"
IL is unpleasant when you do know lust
now much money you have spent and Just
how much you started with and YOU try
to straighten an account, only to find that
you nave spent more money than you had
and there's still IS cents in your purse, to
nave man look at you and wonder audi
ply rs there any woman in the world
who knows the multiplication table?'
1t is unpleasant when you like some
body to have somebody else wonder what
you can see in him; or when you enjoy a
play to have somebody wonder how such
trthes could amuse you; or when you eat
a bit of candy to have them ask how a
sensible woman can consume such stuff
and then tell you what it's made of All
these things are very unpleasant. How
ever, they do exist, and the only thing that
one can do is to smile and ignore them
AT least that's the policy of Bah.