The evening tribune. (Pawtucket, R.I.) 189?-190?, 1897-06-10
SANCI'UM TROUBLE.


"Mr. Jaggcrs," be sad TO the foreman,
"Mr. Hummer wants TO $50 you right
sway-quick."
Mr.. Jnggcrs dropped his pencil ~ no
arose and pushed back his chair.
II wonder wbat In merry shcol II wr0ng
nowi" he muttorcd.
moment or two later he stood before
the managing editor of tho great daily.
"Sit down, Jaggors," said the editor
without looking up from his work. "Pr
eco you In a moment"
Mr.. Jaggers sat down and softly sighed.
He knew tho symptoms. He was In for .
bad quarter Of an hour.
"Well, Jaggers," said tho great man
presently, "I've called you In to tell you
that things are all wrong In your depart
msnt, and, BY lingo, they've got to be
Strengthened outp'
"I'o wbnt do you refer, sirs' inquired
Mr.. Jaggers.
"To-what-do-I-re -referr' echoed the
editor In q tone Of excessive sarcssm.
"Tbat's good. Look here, Jsggers. Day
before yesterday you ran q cut In the pa
per which should have appeared on the
woman's page. It was officially described
ss Pattern Of shirt waist for girl Of 49,
And what did you dof You ran IL In the
paper upside down and called IL Turkish
plan Of operations on the Macedonian
plainf"
"Th-t that's what IL looked like upside
down, SIR" mumbled tho unhappy Jag
gers.
"Herc, wait minute" said the editor.
Ho turned to speaking tube and whis-
tied shrilly.
"Is that you, Georgep Say, George, how
much did tho sale fall off on the 22d?
What's thatY Sold 1000 extraY Eth! Three
hundred and eight new subscribersf
What's that? Everybody wants the war
map9 That's all, George"
The editor dropped the tube and turned
to Mr.. Jaggcrs.
"You see." he cried, "you'rc simply
making the paper ridiculous. And now,
Just look at tkisl'
Ho opened another copy of the paper and
pointed to certain column.
"How In tho name of the prophets" he
harshly cried, "did those headlines get SO
confoundedly mixed What sort Of a title
do you call that for q column account of u
Prohibition gathering"
Mr.. .Jaggcrs looked, and this is the glar-
ing line that confronted him:
"Wet Grounds.
''That," said the editor, "evidently be-
longs on the Baseball cage. And now just
see what you've got there"
Again he handed the paper to Mr.. Jag
gers, and that nervous employees read this
Drink Did It."
The editor crumpled the paper in his
hand as he took 1t back.
'Grhat's 0ne slur on our struggling
ball club, isn't itP Every man jack who
reads that headline will take 1t for grant
ed that the club was drunk and oouldn' t
play. What do you suppose the effect Of
such idiotio headlines is ON an intelligent
publicf Listen TO this"
Again the editor seized the speaking
tube and whistled. 80
"Say, George" he called, '"have you
heard any comments on the headlines we
had in the paper yesterday Eh, whats
that--73 letterss All praising the clever
work of the new headline mans Get OUT
is that sof''
Again tho tube dropped. The great
editor was evidently taken little abaok.
Then he rallied onoe moro and again
pounced on Mr.. Jaggers.
"There," he said, "begin on that COL
umn and read down. Then tell me what
you think Of such diabolical mix upi
Read it aloud"
This is what Mr.. Jaggers read:
1.-The silent man at tho head of the bril-
liant cavalcade rode speedily forward. Be-
fore him rose the pine clad hills Of the
Hutchacoochie and far below flashed the
crystal waters of the laughing Ockmulgee.
T.. l. o.kD ,v~I eA tu<v TO-
with his hands looked steadily across the
valley.
Bring me my glassp' he said.
"The orderly quickly obeycd.
"Raising the foaming beaker to her lips,
the fair young girl cried:
For God and FranceP
"Then with a movement full of inno-
cent grace she half turned in her saddle
and cast the cup far over the cliff.
No other lips shall profane that
she gently added:
"'And now, messieurs, let us advance.
I" We halt here, cried the silent man,
and he tossed his cigar on the ground.
"Tho staff quietly dismounted and stood
back in respectful silence. With knitted
brow the general swept the horizon. Once
uo BtobuTtu tWiCo
Then he nodded to himself. The plan Of
battlo was complete.
May quoth the maid, we will not
fight except IL be Gods will. like not
these scenes of blood. As for the plan Of
battle, of that / have no conception. When
God directs me, will fight, and he will
show me the way
"The littlo bodyguard gazed with rapt
eyes upon the maiden where she stood In
the Thanksgiving sunset light.
"Even as they gazed there came rude
interruption.
"'Givo me fresh cigar cried tho gen
eral.
"And no lighted It from slow burning
match with a coolness which belicd the
fact that the fate of tho nation was hang
ing on his next move"
Mr.. Jaggers paused.
"This Is awful" he said.
awful IL no namo for IT," cried tho
editor. "You SEQ what you have donef"
YES" groancd Mr.. Jaggers, II have
mixed up On the Skirmish Limo With
iirant' with the Annals of Joan of Arc. I"