The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-09-18
CAUGHT THE EDUCATED CRAB

l
other day and Cap'n Eph Browles Wis
tied the village to celebrate the event
When last seen, bound over the hills o.
Hardscrabble, he was close hauled ana
laying course as tortuous as the wake
of q mackelel smack beating to wind
ward against tide and q stiff moth
easter.
| Cap'n Eph had been fishing for the
Educated Crab ever since he was sc
afflicted with rheumatism that he had
to knock off cruising between Bishop
and Clerks lighthouse and the Hand.
kerchief ledge, and do all his fishing in
the bay or of the breakwater. He had
always maintained that the Educated
Crab was yaised in Buzzard's bay and
that it had legs around New Bedford
1t showed vicious knowledge, accord.
ling to Cap'n Eph, only to have been
gained by long experience among
whalemen.
II s'pose that air crab hex been Afoul
my line at least 'leven hundred times, "
remarked Cap'n Eph when he stood in
front of the post Office and displayed the
cadaver of the crab. which he had
brought from the beach carefully
wrapped in paper.
| How do know it's the same crab
Don't yer s'pose kin tell his figger-
head from yourn? addressing the
neighbor on his left and pointing to the
one on his right.) Crabs hev phizes Jest
ez much ez pussons. Sides, there never
wus crab afore that wuz sheathed all
along its keel and deck with barnacles.
! I've hearn tell tibet yer could tell tn age
Nv rattlesnake by tn rattles he steered
by. Eff tibet holds good in tn case Nv
crabs this'n' must be nigh thousand
years old.
1T I'd steal bait Eastern hull school
Nv flyers. Thet's where his dedication
cum in. I've leaned over the gunwale
when l wuz fishing in clear water an
watched him skirmish round morn so
times. He'd 90 skuttlin' round my hook
four or five times, jes' ter get tn bear
ings NV tn bait. but he wouldn't make
no effort ter tech tn bait until he'd gone
up ag'in tn tide for two or three faith
oms. Then he'd come sailin' back with
the tide on his beam an heave to about
three inches from my line.
Every other crab would hev jes'
grabbed fur tn bait an made sail. That
wuzn't tn style of tn dedicated Crab,
howsomever he'd jes' port his helm an
swing athwart tn tide till he'd got his
starboard claw fore an aft with my line,
an then he'd grab tn hook by tn eye
an pint its dizziness end away from his
belly while he picked the bait of with
his port claw. 1t didn't matter how fast
Lhauled in tn line, he'd hev tn hook
bare by tn time rized him to the edge
NV tn water.
He spilled my fishin' fur three sum-
mers, but kotched him at last. How
1t cum about shows that tn smartest
crab amt no way superior 10 man eff 1t
NEEDLES with rum. Night afore las
opened half bucket ur CLANS an set
the bait down by the table right under
where Td-sot nigh about full bottle Nv
Medford rum; enatf use0af0f 6DsiI(i.
leg fur rheumatic. I'd aforementioned
ell about that bottle when cum hum
long about nine o'clock O. night an
tried to light tn glim. Whilst wuz
foolin' round fur match knocked tn
bottle over an most all the likker
swashed down on them air clans.
cussed myself fur lubber all night,
fur had pains in my leg an stumach
mighty bad. But l amt sorry tibet I
spilled tn likker now, SEEM that
kotchsd tn dedicated crab.
II thot ez the likker would be likely
to Spite tn bait, an sureenough didn't /
git bite till tn tide wuz about ebb an
tn ole crab hove in sight. He tosk to
the rum soaked bait jest ez kindly ez a
prohibitionist away from hum. He
my hook an made sail fur his
port, but bimeby he cum back under
full Roadway an seemed dreadful eager
fur mother bite. He got it, but acted
so wobbly that it sot me ter thinkin'.
Says / ter myself, you hev sartainly got
brains enough to git tangled up in
your latitude eff You hist in much more
NV that cargo So / jist jambed tn
hook full Nv rum-soaked clans an let
Cap'n Crab navigate all over the bottom
with it. Bimeby seed tibet he was too
wobbly ter steer within three pints NV |
his course. He he'd to tack half dozen
times afore he could lay himself along
Bide the hook when l baited up agin |
and then he jest grabbed at tn bait,
hook and all, regardless o. conse-
lrecences. / let him git good hold |
lfore yanked, an when / did give pull |
On tn line druv tn hook nigh half
through his port quarter. 1t wasn't |
lime for tn wink ur yallerleg's eye
lfore l he'd him in tn boat; an he lay
har an blinked at me ez drunk ez q
foremost hand in tn fo'kas-
lie NV Baltimore packet. Thet's how
kotched tn dedicated crab. boston
Traveller.
Before His Honor.
Thu fn1I0xn-sx~ ss