Mesa free press., 1897-11-19

like to see you!-Detroit Free Press.
Hell love you madly. She-Thats
what you have already told my friend.
He-Yes, but since then have grown
more sensible.-Fliegende Batter.
Never marry woman unless she
will follow you round the world" eff
had money to go round the world,
wouldn't marry until got back."-Chi-
cago Record.
Impossible People: "Whom were you
just now walking with, Edith?" "No-
body, mamma" That's what l sus-
pected. You must drop him at once"
Detroit Journal.
Pedestrian-Have you no occupation?
Beggar-Yes, sir; I am a collector of
rare coins. You haven't got a spare
ten-dollar gold piece about you, have
you?-Philadelphia Record.
Boblin-Wagley has had his bicycle
stolen. Looley-Is that so? Well, he
has the consolation of knowing that its
loss may prevent him from getting the
bicycle back.-Roxbury Gazette.
docs your wife object to your stay
Ing out so late Of nightsT' "a little;
but what really raises her wrath is for
me to come home so quietly that she
doesn't know when I got in."-Indian-
apolis Journal.
Jibson-I thought you could keep a
secret? Jabson-So 1 can. Jibson-
why didn't you keep the secret I told
you the other day? Jabson-Because,
when you told it, it ceased to be a Sc
cret-Puck.
Gaffer-Queer could never stand pros
perity. Bland-Why? Gaffer-Just as
soon as he began to make money, the
police swooped down and arrested him
for counterfeiting.-Phi North
American.
do not insist, my dear! 1 sha'n't
tell you what 1 am going to give you,
for want to surprise you on our we'd
ding day." ''Tell me quickly, then, for
you keeping your word."-Journal
Amusant.
Jenks-Doctor, have frequent and
intense desire to kiss young and beauti-
full girls. Do you think ought to get
married? His doctor-No; under those
circumstances you'd better not get mar
ried.-The Yellow Book.
81 have read repeatedly" said the
young man, never tc ask a
young lady's permission when you
uy;Chod RI lyicc borv tsyUon r hone vo,,
didn't" said his friend. "No, didn't;
but the young lady, I think, does not
read the papers. Puck.
81 am afraid" said Maud, thought
fully, 'that Willie Wibbles will never
come here again." did he go away in
q pet?" asked Mamie. "Well, some of
him did. Just before he started, my
dear little dachshund bit piece out of
him" Washington Star.
"What lovely bouquetv' eyes; I'm
taking it to Mrs. Wells, as this is her
birthday" "But 1 thought you were
not on very good terms with her now"
Neither 1 am, but this is her fortieth
and she knows that I am the
only one who knows it."-Judy.
"May 1 ask" said the stranger, "what
that party of men is?' Certainly" re-
piled Derringer Dan; "its vigilance
committee. Eff you happen to think of
it, you might ask me ag'in in fifteen or
twenty minutes" ''Will it be something
else then?" yep; coroner's jury
Washington Star.
"Did you get an invitation to that
little blowout Nudge is going to giveY
st haven't yet. What sort Of an affair
Is it?" "He told me over the telephone,
and 1 am not quite sure whether he
said stag party or jag party F" "Real-
ly, now, what is the difference?'-
Journal.
A minister who formerly preached in
Somerville had a little boy. A few
days before his father left the city to
go to his new parish one of his neigh
bors said to the little boy: $50 your
father is going to work in New Bedford
Is hep ooh, no" he said; ''only preach"
Journal.
"Miss Passleigh has had exceptional
social advantages" said one young
woman. "She has been presented to
the queen" "It's strange that never
heard of it," replied the other. "Oh,
she never mentions it. You see, it oc-
Cured so soon after her majesty's core
nation" Washington Star.
Traddles-Don't bother yourself try
ing to invent a flying machine, old man.
If you want to make a hit invent
kicking machine. The Inventor-What
would I do with it? Traddles-Why,
set it up where it will catch the crowd
on the way home from the races
Town Topics.
A country curate calling on the great
lady of the village introduced his newly
married wife as "a poor thing, madam,
but mine own" whereupon the lady,
looking upon the curate severely, re-
piled: "Your wife ought to have intro
d,,ood Won &c snoorar thing hut mino