The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1897-01-27
OUR \SHCDUY ARIS1OCRACT.
AN AMERICAN "PRINCESS."

"A n A VI + RlCAN -PRlNCESS.
Some years ago an old fellow, named
Ward, owned lot Of steamers on the
Great Lakes, and built up an immense
fortune, which descended to his
daughter, Miss Clara Ward. The
young lady, like most Of our modern
aristocracy, despised the mighty ma
tion in which she was born, and de-
sired to put the cap-stone to the old
mans life Of grabbing plumber by
marrying prince. A plain citizen of
the great Republic was not good
enough for her, and so she welded a
Prince Chimay or Chimney or some
such name; and ''left her country for
her country's good;" and the old man
died and probably went to country
where everything is too hot to steal
The story is told of Scotch marau-
der, who two or three hundred years
ago, returned from a raid into Eng
land, and told his father that he had
carried away everything he had clapt
eyes on, except hay-stack. ''And,
Sandy mon," said the old gentleman,
why did We not TAX that?" ut was
on fire, father replied the dutiful
son. Ii there is he'll, land the JUS
tice of God seems to require one,) our
modern aristocracy, when they mi
crate there, will probably have their
thicving propensities checked by the
same considerations which appealed
so strongly to Sandy. We can
imagine Jay Gould and the elder Van
derbilt swapping their fingers and
dancing around, after vain effort to
appropriate some unconsidered trifles
belonging to the devil.
Well the Princess Chimney led her
unfortunate hus band a lively race,
and finally ran off with an ugly little
gypsy, and wentsto live in his moth
er's mud-hut; and the Prince was
compelled to bring an action for d.
vorce; and when the trial came on
this is what happened.
At the opening Of the proceedings,
the public prosecutor asked that the
case be tried in camera So much
publicity, he said, had already been
given to 1t that the world proba bly,
could not be further interested in the
proceedings, but in the interest Of
public deCency he asked that the pub
nc and newspaper men be excluded.
The judge acceded to the public prose-
cutor's request, and, therefore, the
hearing was secret.
Counsel for tire Prince asked the
court to grant his client divorce up
on the admissions of the princess. He
also asked that the princess be allow
ed an hours visit per month to her
children, she paying them an allow
ance Of $4,000 francs yearly. If neces-
sary, counsel added, the petitioner
would produce witnesses to prove
further stated the petitioner could prore
four times thdt number of acts n justit-
cation Of the proceedings.
Isn't that beautiful! And are we
not proud, as Americans, that our
country has had the honor Of produc-
ing such beastly little harridan?
And should we not help the gold-bu
and bankers, (such Of them as remain
alive in these good times'). to de-
stroy the liberties Of this country, and
change it into monarchy; and SO &c
into the breeding of such dirty crea-
lures as this Princess Chimney?
This is to be the elimination of the
tolls and hazards of Washington and
Franklin and Jefferson, and the men
OF 1916 We must give up the dignity
and the majesty of the worlds great
est republic, and go to breeding such
sluts, and send them over to Europe
and put them on exhibition to aston
world with infamies greater than
they have ever dreamed Of!
Is it any wonder that there are So
cial circles in London into which no
American woman can enter2