The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1897-11-17

there are five-a, e, l, ., u ana some
times and y.
"They have discovered a lake up
in Alaska that is tecming with fish. >
"Eh? 1 thought they did all their
teaming with dogs.
: 'Is your baby intelligent p. In
telligent! Why, if she wasn't she'd
never be able to understand the Ian
guage my wife talks to her.
Wife-"John, there's a burglar
in the house p John fervently)-
"Thank goodness he is not out in the
woodshed-my wheel is out.
= "My Freddie rode like lightning
the first time he got on wheel. .
"You are fbbing!'' "Not bit.
Doesn lightning go in zig-zag?'
"Well, well" said the old friend,
chow did you ever come to join the
Salvation Army ?' "It was the only
way" the young man admitted, that
1 could get the public to submit to
my cornet playing.
There is no need of little children being
tortured bv scald head, eczema and skin
eruptions. DeWitts Witch Hazel Salve
gives instant relief and cures perma-
nently. Evans Pharmacy.
= Wife-What sweet smile there
is on the baby IS face, John! Husband
Yes; he's probably dreaming that
he's keeping me awake
You can't cure consumption but you
can avoid it and cure every other form OF
throat or lung trouble by the use OF One
Minute Cough Cure. Evans Pharmacy
Mrs. NJ. G. Linn Of Galacio, Rush
county, Kansas, gave birth recently to
three boys, whom she named after
Bryan, Lcedy and Simpson. Jerry
sent silver dollar to his boy to cut
his teeth on.
Small pill, safe pill, best pill. DeWitts
Little Early Risers cure billousness, con-
stipation, sick headache. Evans Phar-
macy.
Henry, do you believe in the
universal brotherhood of man p BE
lievc in it? 1 should say SO down at
the sea-shorc this summerI had thirty,
five sisters" "
You can't afford to risk your life by
allowing cold to develop into pneumo'
MIA or consumption. Instant relle1 ana
certain cure are afforded by One Minute
Cough Cure. Evans Pharmacy.
Here's a check endorsed y. r.
Tompkins.' Who is Tompkins, a man OF
woman ?" "a woman, Of course.
"Why. of course p "lt's endorsed at
the wrong end. !"
J. Nj. Thirswend, Of Grosbecl, Tex.
saws that when he has spell Of indiSes
ton, and feels bad and sluggish, he takes
two of Dewitt's Little Early KiserD a.
night, and he is all right the next morn
ing Many thousands of others do the
same thing. Doyou? Evans Pharmacy
eff 1 had known" sobbed young
Mrs. Fitz, "that you would be such
brute to poor Fido, 1 would never
have married you "My dear, re
piled Mr.. Fitz, "the anticipation Of
kicking that miserable little beast val
one of my chief reasons for proposing
to you"
WARN1NG-Persons who suffer from
coughs and colds should heed the warn
| ings of danger and save themselves suf
fering and fatal results by using On
| Minute Cough Cure. 1t is an infallib!'
| remedy for coughs, colds, Group and al
! throat and lung troubles. Evans Pbar
macy.
= After trying for half day t.
ride his new bicycle, the slim-legge'
bookkeeper carried it up to the attl
and thrust it in among the cobwebs
II shall have to charge that machin
up to profit and loss he said, with
dismal sigh, 81 never can make /
balance y
J. C. Berry, one Of the best known citi
zens of Spencer, Mo-, testities that b
cured himself Of the worst kind of pile
by using few boxes Of DeWitts Wltc
Hazel Salve. He had been troubled wit
piles for over thirty years and had use
manv different kinds of so-calied cures
but DeWitts was the one that did ih
| ...o.I, nna ha will perifv this statement