Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1897-12-28


10 amused the Italian that he felt obliged
to rush into the shelter Of the basement
to conceal his delight Had he been q
native Of this country. II might have
suggested itself to him 10 sweep the
thin guise Of snow from the ice and 20
sprinkle salt or ashes uron il; but. being
a foreigner aud not very well acquainted
with our language, he did not think OF
this, but instead he posted himself in
position 10 give him n good view OF the
corner and patiently waited for devel-
opments. He saw them. II his object
was to get an idea Of the fullness and
hexibility OF the English language, he
could not have possibly adopted better
course
Scarcely had the carpenter gathered
up his things and limped of when
man smoking came hurryiug along.
When be reached the ice, he suddenly
turned part way round. bit brier wood
pipe completely in twain and slid on his
breast off from the walk into the gutter.
He got up. cautiously recovered his pipe
and melted away. The Italian shook all
over.
Following closely after this mishap
was laborer with dinner kettle.
When he touched the ice, il was diff
cult for the fruit merchant 20 determine
whether il was his feet or another part
Of his person. il was done so quickly.
The newcomer appeared to suddenly
come apart and shut up at the middle,
and in the same fash the tin pail de-
scribed q circle Of lightning rapidity
and was then slapped against the pave
ment with terrific force. At the same
instant the Italian saw piece Of pie.
several half slices Of buttered bread,
two hard boiled eggs. u piece OF cold
beef and fork and spoon fly of in diff
ferent directions. while pint tin OF
coffee made its appearance and emptied
its contents in the prostrate mans lap.
While this individual was getting up
to his feet and securing his pail and
cutlery the Italian managed to blend
considerable instruction with the amuse-
ment
Then there came man with board
on his shoulder. He lay down ON the
board, with one of his hands under the
board. Then he got up and put the IN
jured hand between his knees, where
he pressed it tightly, while he used the
most dreadful language the Italian ever
heard, and he didn't hear il all either,
being 80 convulsed with laughter as to
necessarily divide his attention.
Aud thus the performance went on
until after O'Clock. Scarcely ten min
utes elapsed between the acts. Some
times q boy would be- the hero, then
again couple Of merchants or perhaps
somebody connected with bank. Who
ever IL might be. he went down, and
went down hard, and the Italian watch
ed and improved his mind and began to
think that this country had its advan-
tages as well as its disadvantages. IL
was ii minutes past when the final
catastrophe occurred This was consum
mated in the person Of long, slim man
with picture under his arm and very
large woman carrying q basket. The
long, slim man was somewhat in ad-
vance. The Italian, being impressed
with the conviction that something OF
an extraordinary nature was about to
transpire, stared with fairly bulging
eyes at the. coming figure. No sooner
did the tall, slim man touch the treach
erous spot than the venturiDg foot kick
ed out most savagely at the atmosphere,
and his body shot around like fireworks.
The picture few from his possession at
the same moment, and, being thus freed.
he made q spasmodic clutch with all
bis limbs at once for place Of refuge.
and in fash his legs whipped about a
corner leg Of the inoffensive peanut
stand, and the great, shining yellow
pyramid followed him TO the pavement.
The Mortified Italian, stunned for an in
slant by the enormity Of the catastrophe,
sought to plunge out to the rescue OF
his goods, but was too late. The heshy
woman. having rushed TO the aid Of the
tall, slim man, who was her husband,
was caught herself by the subtle foe.
and in her descent. which was BY far
the most vigorous Of the series, she took
in two-thirds of the peanuts, and the
crash of the demolished fruit as she
pinned IL to the walk might have been
heard four squares away.
The unhappy vender reached the
place in time 70 be taken in himself,
and the addition Of 1870 pounds Of maca-
roni fed Italian added to the dismal
proportions Of the scene. How they got
disentangled and on their feet no one
seems able to explain, but the result
was reached amid an appalling uproar
Of Italian, English and feminine noises.
What great matter little fire kin
dlethi Ten cent? worth Of salt would
have saved all the misery and digtress.
Al it il. Danbury has some 90 persons
With damaged backs or legs, the owner
OF the building has four suits ON hand
for damages, the tall. slim man and bis
wife are confined TO their beds, and on
Saturday last the Italian was morosely
squatted alongside Of the funnel Of Q
steamer bound for Italy,. H. Bailey.