New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1897-07-08
THE TALK or THE DAY,

When Robert Lowe was once the Continent In
the enjoyment of long vacation. he and friend
In the course Of walk. across a man who
appeared to be lying asleep the ground. AS they
returned they found him in the same position, and
his companion. going up to the body. exclaimed:
Good God! the man is dead" Come along" said
Lowe, taking his friends arm, mo business Of
Custom Of the country"
Deluded-Weary Watkins-Don't Alabama mean
here rest?
books and went down there TO about 1t. and
them long haired. gun-luggin' farmers KEEP me on
till got out.-Qndianapolis Journal
Bombs and Internal machines Of all sorts have
been occupying the attention Of Parisians to such
an extent during the last few weeks that their
presence Is suspected upon the slightest possible
evidence The latest scare occurred few days ago.
In the presence Of a considerable number OF per-
sons who had assembled to hear a notary read
their uncles will. The reading took place In the
house Of the dead man. While the usual inventory
being taken a general search made
through the various drawers and cupboards. and
there discovered small cylindrical metal
box. The heirs thought they had found hoard of
money when suddenly one Of the nieces, examin-
ing the box more closely. gave a shrek.
BE careful" she cried. lit has a fuse
And So on investigation it appeared TO have
Besides. the cylindrical form Of the box pre-
csely in accord with the descriptions OF bombs
The police were called at once, and the engine OF
destruction was hurried Off TO the municipal labo
ratory and opened. 1t contained-a preserved pine
apple. The supposed fuse was the stem OF the
fruit projecting through the top. The heirs depart
ed, rather mortified, but the laboratory officials
profted by the occurrence. dsposing of the bomb
promptly and with satisfaction TO themselves.
Diogenes on foot. with bicycle lantern.
why do you carry that lantern? inquired the
king.
quoth, Diogenes. and up to the present date each
man have net has recommended different one
-(Washington Capitol.
The Aftieth anniversary Of the incorporation OF
New Bedford. Mass. will be celebrated on October
10 On that day, which will be Sunday. special
services will be held in all the churches On Mon
day the festivities will begin, and will continue
three days
Little Jchnny-Pa. why is Il they have that big
Pa-B.cause my son. the eagle is a bird OF prey
When you want to know anything: always come
right to your pa.-(Boston Transcript.
THE Charleston News and Courier mentions
The Tribune as of the Northern papers that
have accused the people Of Texas Of narrow min
edness in their attitude toward Northern professors
In the State University. On the contrary. The
Tribune declared editorially that the attack on
these professors in the Legislature did not repre-
sent the views Of the people Of the State, and the
failure Of the attack has proved that view of the
correct.
womans way..,,He-when women ge; to voting.
II they ever should, they will be found wearing the
party yokes meekly as the men.
She-Thcy won't If Jokes are not in style.-(Cin-
cinnati Enquirer
The London Daily News says that c. Roevelen
recently found in the Philippine Islands group u
orchids bearing rich blue flowers. Blue orchids
had never been heard OF before The dlscoverer
named the species Dendrobium Victoria in honor
Of the British Queen.
The summer sun glared iercely down
Upon the seashore gay,
And watched the maidens as they pranced
In Neptunes brny spray.
.'Humph." said the orb as up he rose
And took another turn;
IT'S true that men are lacking here.
But there are girls TO burn life.
The following sentence won prize recently Of
fered in England for the longest tweve-word tele-
gram "Admnstrat tor Generals counter-revou-
tionary intercommunicaio tons unclrcumstantia ted
Ouartermaster Generals Observation-Disclosures
Enthusiastically contra distinguished unconstitu
tionalis,'s incomprehens!bties" 1t is said that
the telegraph authorities accepted 1t as dispatch
OF twelve words.
Misunderstood-"By Jover said the British
I0S SSnS sst nice cold tub ~
4 gosh said the Gassenser with with the he whisksrs
myself"-(Cincinnati Enquirer.
Kansas Doasts 'hdt u ia" """"'"''" TIC o'Hcr
day In which the hallstones were as large az
ostr,chs eggs and It Is said that one enterprising
farmer filled his cellar with the stones. covered
them with sawdlst. and will sell them to families
that need Ice.
Last Cal.-'I have come to have a serious inter.
view with you" announced the wouid-be son-in-
law.
The old gentleman fell right In with the idea AMI
made things so serious that the young man
glad to escape without his hat-tDetrot Free
Press.
Irish flags were displayed on number Of build
,rgs In Leadvile. Col. on Monday. but the owners
were compelled to take them down by crowd OF
angry citizens
"In Austria" she said. nearly all the BARRIERS
are women"
He looked up from his paper and shook his head
doubtfully. Il wouldn't like H." he said. at last
TITS bad enough to have prizehght news dinned
into your ears when you're helpless. but II would
be Infinitely worse TO have to hear oil about the
latest fashions. "-(C Chicago Pest