The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1897-10-19


Religious Scruples And Go To A Circus
AFTER A Tremendous Struggle lhey
Desert he Poor 6eathen
R.-"HelIol Mr.. Editor"
R.-"Hellol Major. Hope you are
feeling "a solid as a o silver dollar.
B-"Bu5 1 amt, In tack I'm fee!in'
awl stove up. l feel like Ihad just bin
through two perliElkal campanes, a
cyclone an q family disturbance or
two. II you hev ever bin thai you
know how l feel; il you hsint bin thar
you will h5v ter ak sum ov the Majors.
If you can't judge CIV my teeIins by
whut I've done tole you, then IN say
that 1 feel ike a feller does after ne
hex lifted up the hind foot ov a plous
Iookin'' mule, or just after he hez bin
monkeyin' with g Ouz saw"
R-"Well lay aside your pains and
aches ard come down 60 the interest
ing part OF your story"
Bah right. Coin ter the circus
Caused it wi Ne an Betsy, especially
RsfsV. ~ara-sorter down On Circuses IN
general. an In particular, too, but we
can't Keep frum tallin' from gTeeo sum
times. We don't exactly a the fur
hidden fruit, but We drink the furbld-
den lemonade ON the circus GROUNDS
sumtimes We ant keep frum 1t ter
save our natural ives. Sumglm9 ergo
Betsy read III the papers that a circus
wuE headIn' this way. she sed she
Wuz nifty sorry fer them lrcuses do &
lot ov harm one an another, an take
lots ov mummy out ov the country WhuU
mite go ter educate the poor heather
in the Sandwich Islands an other fur
rim places. i sed yes they DO,
they take away lots ov money tnaS
mite be used ter pay taxes an things
like that. Then | sed That we wouldn't
bother with 'em this year, fer l Wuz
too busy gatnerIn' corn an soWln
wheat ter be wasJln' time on cIrcuses,
an thai we would chip IN a nice little
poi fer the poor heather instead.
NothiD' more Wuz sed erDOuJ it till the
other day q wagon cum erlong an d
Teller tnrOwed out SUI show papers
aWl pictured eff with animals an
things, an they had readIn' On them
teliin' wnut great things they wuz
soin' ter snow. Betsy go5 n ov EN-
an put On her glasses an soG down Ter
read iE. l wouldn't take a strate LOOK
at it fer I wuz awlready feelin' like q
little req lemonad would comfy Nee,
even II the poor heather should run
short on Testaments. Directly Betsy
flowed 'well, I would jest like ter see
that VOL dertul new animal they hev
in the show that cum awl the way
frum Africa at an expense on $50. coo "
/ sed yes Betsy, &c would l but remem
Der the poor heather. They need awl
our spare charge, an the home churches
stand IN need Nv aWl the help we KID
give them" Sne lowed, why, OF
course, / amt goin' ter see them"
NOthin' more Wuz sed till the mite be
fore the SNOW WuZ ter be In town. /
tole betsy that aWl ov Bill Simpsons
folks were goIn' ter town ter see the
circus, an awIso Henry Smiths folks,
in fack most aWl oV the MAJORS. Betsy
sed she'd like ter go an look st the
street parade if she Wuz sartin' they
would play Dixie" on the steam plan
ner. 1 tote her maybe they would, but
we must not turgiG the poor heather In
the Sandwich Islands. We went ter
bed, but L noticed that Betsy didn't
sleep much. I didn' either. I seen
that the chances fer the heather were
CROWN slim By four o'clock / tole
Betsy we mite as we'll give up the fEe
an git up an go ter town in time ter
see the street parade anyway. she sed
she had made up her mind ter stay
away, but That life wuz short an we
mite az veil hev a little Jun as not ter.
/ felt that q CRATE load he'd bin lifted
off my shoulders. We went an saw
the parade an then / sed we mite az
well go an look at the animals Judgin'
frum whut we both kin tell erbout
whu5 the bareback riders an the
clowns did we both saw the circus part
oV it, too, but l don't remember how
we got into that part ov it. anyway
I'm feelin' awl broke up, Betsy sed it
Wuz caused by my tryin' ter see whur
Wu7 goln' on in aWl three ov the rings
at the same time, but 1 reckon it IL be,
kase we cheated the poor heather out
oY Whut we mite hev given them ter
subscribe fer religious papers. GUIDE
bye"
"Owe no man anything, " said PAUL.
Now If you owe US ANYTHING please
send it at once.