The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1897-09-02
WHITNEY'S GRIST
OF PERT TRUTHS
IT'S the Chronicle Of a Pen That Never
Prevaricated.
OLD SUSQUEHANNA's LATEST cURIO
TweIve-Inch Lizard with a Head Like
a Frog, Porpoise-Likc Nose and
Other Characteristics Suggestive OF
Strong Drink --Uther News and Cos
sip from Our Northern Neighbors.
pecial to the Scranton Tribune.

sip from Our Northern Neighbors.
Special to the Scranton Tribune.
Susquehanna, Sept. 1.-Farmer Will
son, of Great Bend township, drew up
from his well, in the water bucket, a
most curious reptile. The thing, which
looks something like a huge lizard, is
about twelve inches long. and is of a
dark brown or leaden color, with dull
yellow spots over the entire dody. 1t
has head like a frog, is white under
the throat, and its breathing holes are
situated in its upper jaw, in the same
manner as a porpoise. 1t has four legs
and a large fiat tail about the same
length as the body. With this tail it
can propel itself through the water at
a very rapid rate. 1t is by some sup
posed to be triton or water rewt, but
Wilson says that if it is removed from
the well. the well will go dry as it's
mission is to keep the springs open,and
they generally go in pairs.
THE NEWS RECORD.
In Great Bend, on Thursday, an al
lied aggregation of Scranton, Syracuse
and Great Bend players dubbed the
hanna club two games. The morning
record was - to A; the afternoon, 10 to
{. The conduct of the crowd at these
games during the two games would
have been a disgrace to tribe of
Sioux Indians. 1t is a mistake to send
missionaries to India when a ripper field
is so much nearer home.
The Great Bend club came to Sus-
quehanna on Saturday afternoon, and
the home club downed them, 21 to IL.
In view of the indecent actions OF the
crowds attending the games in Great
Bend, Manager Mcmahon, of the Sus-
quehanna club. may cancel the remain
der of the dates with, the Great Bend
club.
The celebrated ex-Cuban Giants, of
New York, will play a game with the
home nine, in Beebe park, on Wednes-
day afternoon.
The corner stone of the Susquehanna
Presbyterian church will be laid on
Thursday, September 9. Several prom
incnt clergymen of the Lackawanna
Presbytery will be present. Rev. Shas.
Lee, of Carbondale, will preach the SER
mon.
GREATLY EXAGGERATED.
A woman at Stevens Point on retir-
ing to bed the other night saw a large
snake crawling along just above her
head. The reports that her screams
were heard over in Wayne county, fif-
teen miles distant, is an exaggeration.
They were heard only as far as the ad-
joining township, a distance of not
more than thirteen miles and a half.
This habit of eXaggeration should be
frowned down.
THE SHORT OF IT.
The funeral of Jacob I. Skinner, an
occurred on Monday afternoon, with in
terment in McKune.
Quite a number of Susquehanna and
vicinity young men have Klondcitis, in
a chronic form.
A goodly contingent of vicinity young
people have hied them to the hop fields
at Otsego county.
After a shut down of several months,
the Susquehanna Shirt factory resumed
| operations on Monday.
Susquehanna will be we'll represented
at the five county firemen's conven-
tion in Athens, September 2, 3.
The Susquehanna club has won IA
of the II games played this season.
There's nothing small about that per-
centage.
HELP TO SUPPLY THE WANT.
Late statistics show that 213 Penn
| sylvania towns are without news
papers. If those communities are
equipped with the usual quota of gar
rulous women, who chase the streets
before their breakfast dishes are
washed, to gather up, magnify and dis
seminate the gossip and slander sew
erage of the night before, the absence
of newspaper will, in part, be sup
| piled.
HEARD ON THE BOULEVARD.
S. S. Tooker. of New Milford, was
in town few days since, exhibiting a
six pound cannon ball, caught by him,
red hot from the cannon, before it
touched the ground, at the first battle
of Bull Run. Mr.. Tooker will probably
be engaged by the Susquehanna ball
club.
Our State Senator Hardenbergh failed
to catch the Republican nomination
for Auditor-General, but dollars to
doughnuts that he will get some nice
plum later on. Mark the prediction.
rive anu SIX lOOI IattleSnakeS are
being killed hereabouts with charming
regularity-and a club. The sweet
songsters are exceedingly plentiful this
season.
Camp meetings are being we'll attend
ed this year. The world is growing
better.
The prospects are that owing to the
excessive drought early in the season,
and to the presence Of a new-style
bug, there will not be enough cucum-
bers in Susquehanna county this year
to give one able-bodied man a decent
attack of collie.
AN UP-TO-DATE STEER.
Farmer Thomas Morgan, of Sum-
mersville, Is the owner of a steer that
pumps, by the use of it's horns, all the
water 1t drinks. When taken out of the
barn the steer makes straightway for
the pump. BY placing one horn on the
pump handle and forcing 1t down, and
then changing and placing its horn