The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1897-05-30
PERSONAL AND SOCIETY
SUGGESTIONS AS TO ETIQUETTE
PERTINENT TO ENGAGEMENTS.
Part Americans Are TO Play Socially
at the Queens JubiIee-MOve-
ments of People.

One of the new forms for wedding invi-
tations is to have the reception invitation
printed as the main part of the invitation,
and if one is to he asked to the ceremony,
at the left hand corner are the words Ger
emony at ) O'clock or whatever hour may
be desired. This does away with an envelope
full Of cards. Part of the reception invita-
tions are printed with the ceremony an
nouncement and others have it omitted, a
custom which has it's advantages.
The wife of one of the British delegates
TO the postal congress, says an exchange
delightful woman who has spent much
of her life in India, tells of an Indian GUS
tom which quite makes one want to start
for Calcutta by the next steamer. In Cal
cutta, she says, everybody has servants by
the dozen and when you go out to dine you
always take with you a servant from your
own household who is perfectly familiar
with your tastes. 1t is his duty to see that
you are given only such things to eat as
you like, and if he permits you to be served
with a dish you are not in the habit OF eat
ing. you discharge him at once. 1t seems
like a fairy tale, but l wish it were fairy
tale that might come true in this country.
OF all the years, this one is to be notable
for the presentation at court of young la
dies. One of the great difficulties is the
management of the long trains which are
worn and those wearing them have to back
out of the presence of the Queen and are
not allowed to raise the train from the floor
A writer says there are schools in London
where one is taught how to manage train
The scholars at these establishments are
women of all ages, and the teachers are
experts in all the ways of society, the
ethics, the methods. 1t takes weeks of
preparation to become fitted for presenta-
ton at court The English society girl is
taught to look forward to the event as Sec
ond only to her wedding day She thinks
of it all during early grlhood and is edu-
Gated with the idea in mind.
The following from an exchange gives
what is supposed to be the etiquette of en-
gagements. If strictly followed the matri-
moniaI alliance may be found trife irk-
some When a man has received the an
swer which is conventionally supposed to
have made him the happiest creature in the
world his first step must be to secure the
reality of that supposition by asking the
consent of his future brides parents or
guardians
1t is correct to see the parents. not write
to them, unless the latter course is the only
one pOSSlDlC 10 NdhCs w ilCit SOASChN 40 SANNA
the engagement is looked upon settled
thing, and the next thing is to make it
known.
This should be done in the very first in
stance by the bridegroom expectant, who
announces it to his family. They should
without delay call upon his fiancee. ex-
pressing their pleasure at the news, and as
surfing her of o. welcome among them.
These calls should be returned, or the let
ters answered, with promptitude; and now
the general public is informed of the event.
This may be done by writing to distant
friends and telling otheSs by word of
mouth 1t is usual to send notice Of the
engagement to certain papers, where it is
likely to be widely seen.
The bridegroom-elect Arst care should
be 10 provide the engagement ring, the out
changed. 1t is usual to let the brides taste
select 1t, and he may either ascertain her
preference before buying 1t, or send tray
from the jewelers. for her to select from
Friends and acquaintance on hearing of
the engagement, should at once send their
congratulations and good wishes This may
either be done by calling in person to de-
liver them. or by writing. Calls of congrat-
ulation should be returned and letters an
swered, A few words Of cordial thanks are
all that required.
During the engagement some of the
stricter rules of chaperonage are relaxed.
Engaged people are allowed to ride, cycle
and walk together unattended, though not
of course, as publicly as necessitates a
chaperon as well. Considerable people, where
they dine out, will often try to send them
in TO dinner together; but this is a point
which can never be looked upon as a right,
since presidency and convenience have to
be considered.
A correspondent of the London Times
says: THE American girl, like the Ameri-
can Beauty rose, will be one of the notable
features of the Queens jubilee. This has
been placed beyond all doubt by the per-
senality of the young ladies whom Embas-
sador and Mrs. Hay have chaperoned
through the awsome channel that leads to
the harbor of the royal presence Many
very handsome young women who hail
from the United States have been pre-
Sented at court, but the debutantes of 1897
in court life from the other side are un-
usually attractive. CHANGING at the list of
names of those who have bowed low in the
royal presence, there is noticed one of the
most notable of the New York pretty So
ciety girls, Miss Daisy Post. Perhaps one
OF Miss Posts claims to prominence is the
fact that she Is said to be engaged to Brad
iey-Martfn, jr. Then there are Miss French
of New York; Miss Taylor and Miss Caro-
line Phelps Stokes, of the same place and
Miss DreXel and Miss Julia Rush. of Phila-
delphia. Even though small, this is a list
for the portrait painter to revel in The
Gainesborough beauties will certainly have
to look to their laurels''