The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1897-11-04
NYE'S COSTLY DINNER.

occasions when he got into the same
horl2on with Sam" Davis, and when
they associated there were hot times
in the old towns.
After Nye had become famous and
had taken to lecturing. he had an odd
adventure with Davis, whom often be-
lore ne mad met joyously and parted
from sadly. 1t was such an affair.
narrates the Chicago Record as the
humorlst used to delight to put into
print, and 1t seems impossible that he
has not told the story. If he has. the
man who has read it heretofore can
skip it in this column.
Davis was working on a San Fran
cisco paper, and Nye meeting him. ask
Ell II 1t were true that one could get
royal banquet in the Golden Gate
town Tor the ridiculous prices mention
ed by men who had been there Da-
Wis said the stories were overdrawn.
Dut still one could manage to exist on
Wnat was set before him, even if he
did not have kegful of money in his
possession.
III tell you what" he said, you
come along with me to dinner this
everlag, and I'll take you to a rotis-
selle-one of those French restaurants.
you know, where you can get some
thlng for twenty-five cents. OF if you
prefer hfteen-cent meal"
guess not" cried Nye. who was
spending fifteen dollars day for be-
ing allowed to breathe in the Palace
Hotei. "A quarter meals cheap
enough"
After they parted Davis hurried to
one CT the finest eating-houses in all
lhe coast country. and had a brief but
convincing conversation with the pro-
prIeto'. He also called in to his aid
man with whom he knew Nye had
Il some pleasant correspondence, and
"AOhl the iecturing knight desired to
meet In the evening the three gour-
me's approached the lair of good eat
ing. Inc menu card was presented
Il was about as long as the Canadian
IStlncs timetable, and made men,
tlo1 OF wonderful things gastronomi-
cal but Davis and the Other san
ncls"oan behaved with illtsnner
en- trey saw it. There was no va
Ii.'y. IL was no better than the ten
cent meals provided on Kearney street.
ana mere they were prepared to ray
|" y 0lts head. Finally these two i'm
PaNently directed the waters to br,n.
e'~-J lhiag that was on the bill. and
they would select something fit to eat
Dut or the lot. Mr.. Nye had very lit
tle half, but what he had rose in q
spiky way.
10 you mean to say" he gasped,
that tne price Of such a meal as you
are ordering is a quarter"
Wen, said Davis, in confusion "of
course hfteen cents would be about the
right price, but something seems to be
wrong with the chef to-day. Try to
MAKE out little, and we will 60 some
Where else tomorrow. | am really
hlied with shame at bringing you here
10 such poor, dismal excuse for n
dlnner, but l hadn't been in here for
month, and didn't know il had run
down So"
The two coastwlse men objected IN
everything. The wine was not more
than twenty years old whereas thew
were paying money enough to get good
stuff. The Holsters were wrong IN
some way, the salads were faulty, thew
insisted; the bird, the fish. the sirloin
everything clear through to the fruit
and ice cream and pastry and coffee
ana cognac was criticized. 1t might
De considered passable at twenty
cent place, but at shop where the
price was twenty-five cents it was in
excusable. The worst of it was that !
tney had guest with them. and he
would carry away a poor opinion of |
san FRANCISCO hospitality. They again
called the proprietor over and forced
hlm to apologize 20 the visitor for the !
Wretched food he had served. Then
Davis paid the checks, which were for
twenty-five cents apiece, and Nye near.
ly tainted when the cashier humbIy
thanked him.
The next day Nye slipped away from
all friendly hands and secretly went
around to that restaurant. He want
Bd 10 nave just one more of those stu-
pendous twenty-hve-cent dinners. So
ne ordered about one-third what no
naa taken on the previous day.
Ihere's no use wasting food lust he
cause it Is provided so generously ana
at such a price," he reasoned. And
ne called for his check.
Somewhat to his surprise. the checs
Was for twenty-five dollars and sew.
anty cents.
The Davis dinner had been nice
pleasant little prearranged swindle nut
up by sam" and his friend and the
'estauranteur
IL was the same Sam" Davis who
previous to this, had been for one dav
Ihlef Justice OF the Supreme Court of
ne state of North Carolina, though
lie mad never been in North Carolina
Going East one winter, the man
from the Coast stopped off at Laramie
TO renew his troubles with Nye. who
vas then Justice of the Peace The
OSa. wGs busy with legal hearing
ana when Davis appeared in the door
way .Nye Immediately called him for
ward.
Gentlemen Of the bar" he said. ad-
crossing the two attorneys, 1T affords
me pleasure to introduce Chief Justice
OF the North Carolina Su-
preme Court. Judge, your arrival Is
most opportune, and | want Won to
sit here with me and advise me on this
case. Join me on the bench" Then
In whisper, Back me up, you out
law, or IN commit you for ten days
as a yagrant."