The San Francisco call., 1897-01-03
The Loaded Goat
Of BornaI Heights

"Eanible" wss being led up the hill by
Billy Maroney, when he spied bunch of
thistles and glued himself to them, chew
ing at the spky leaves with evident relish.
Billy could not pull him and so kicked
him. The next second "Hanible" had
turned like a flash, had knocked Billy
Maroney on his back after several in
voluntary handsprings and was executing
a can-can upon his recum bent person and
using his horns in highly scientific and
vigorous fashion. When Billy Maroney
finally got up, with the help of the small
boys who fought "Hanible" eff, there was
a big red swelling on his right cheek
where he had been gored, his nose was
bleeding and he was breathing very hard,
but was still game, and took "Hanible's"
rope once more and led the beast to the
battle-ground.
Hanifn's goat going to battle made no
trouble. He walked along peaceably
enough, with head down and an air OF
meekness about him that made all the
gossoons laugh.
law, he's no good. Ranible will use
him for a chopin block"
That seemed to be the case. The Hani-
fin goat could not be coaxed to rear up on
his hind legs or to butt. Mike Hanlhn
was in despair.
'Whstp he said. 81 know what he
wants-milkweed." ?"
Mike was off like shot and after
little was seen toiling up the hill once
more. In his arms he carried five-gallon
oiIcan bristling full of weeds. The Hani-
fin goat smelled them afar and his
eyes twinkIed with glee, while he emitted
the most pathetic and coaxing whinny of
which he was capable.
GOOD boy" said Mike, admiringly.
"Wait little. boys, until he gets nip
and then he'll be ready for YOU"
The oilcan was just large enough for the
goat to get his nose in. He began to make
crunching noise as the edible weeds
were crushed between his teeth.
"Hanible" smelled the weeds. too, and
made for the oilcan. The Hanifn goat
heard him coming and looked up. There
was danger of losing bis feed, and the
Hanihn goat, with one eye on Hanible,
hastily tried 10 resume his feed. In some
way he got his horns inside the can.
When he raised his head he was wearing
a tin helmet, of which he vainly tried to
free himself.
Then it was that the real fighting blood
of Hanifn's goat asserted itself. Blinded
as it was, it made a rush for Hanible,
thinking that this was trick put up on
him by his rival.
Crash! bang The tin helmet struck
Hanibie cornerwise souarey in the mid
die of its forehead, and that animal
turned tail and ran, frightened by this
strange thing on four goat legs.
"Hooray!" shouted Mike Hanifin;
"he's off"
Mixes triumph was short-lived. The
goat went in his direction and hit
him in the wind, and he doubled up
like iackknife and went down below
ing.
Then Billy Maroney was bucked off his
feet, and half a dozen other boys were
rolled over, and there was panic among
them which speedily became rout. They
ran down the slopes like party of charg-
ing Apaches, and the Hanihn goat, like
Jill in the nursery ballad, ''came after"
Yes, the Hanifin goat came after with a
rush.
Hanifin had a half day off and he
reached home just as the goat charged
down HILL There is no doubt that he was
astonlshed, as he had ;he right to be. He
did the best thing he could to divert the
goats attention, which was TO drop his
dinner pail, which he had i'll his hand and
run. The goat chased Haniin who ran
so that all BernaI Heights was delighted.
Biff! bang! whang came the goat up
against Haniin's front fence just as Han
ifn tumbled over it into his wfe's flower
bed. breaking down ali her Lady Wash
ington" geraniums and kicking into
smithereens a small greenhouse which
it had taken Mrs. HanIfin's brother half
a day to build. Hanifin had hardly got
on his feet before the goat with the tin
helmet on its head was chasing him
around the YARD, following him by the
sound of his footsteps and the curses
which he audily emitted.
When this part of the entertainment
was over the Hanihn goat backed out and
got Tom Hannegan in chancery and was
likely to punch the breath out OF him for
good, but Tom got hold of the oilcan and
Maroney pulled at the goats tail and
something had to give. The tail was on
stronger than the can, and so the can
came off fist. Daylight bursting on the
goat it at once made bee line for Hani-
fms overturned dinner pail, and before
Hanihn appeared on the scene with
club with wrath in his eye and fragments
of rosebush in all other parts of his anat-