Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1897-09-08

engaged to him. what caused the
delay"
She-And what would you be now If
1t weren't FOR my money? He-A bach
eor.-Boston Traveller.
Il saw Singleton with his wheels to-
day why not say bieycle?" Be
cause 1t was baby carriage"
How much have repairs cost you
since you've been riding the blcycle?"
Repairs to what-myself or the ma
chine ne?"-Boston Traveller.
Husband-How do you like the view?
Wife with ecstacy)-Oh! am speech
less. Husband-I shall stay and build
n house.-Journal Amusant.
Blhman-Did your watch stop when
you dropped 1t on the floor? Mag,ey-
or course it did. Did you think 1t
would so through ?-11t-Bits.
where's yer brother got to lately.
'Lza?" "'E got ten days for knockin'
pleeceman down." "W'ot? ten days
for one Y-pick Me-Up.
'I'm sure I'll never be able to walk
up the aisle with papa "Why not,
my childT' Papa Is so ridiculously
low geared. d."-Clevelan Plaindealer
"Do you suppose scorching is the
cause of all these bicycle faces we
see?" "Shucks, no! In nine cases out
of ten it's the lnstallment plan."-
Truth.
Frank-some genius in Birmingham
has inyeEted buttonless shirt. Billy
Why, that's old. I've worn them
ever since my wife learned to ride
bike-TidrB Bits.
Mr.. Kashbocks-My money is lot
of trouble to me. Miss Mayting They
say every man ought to have some
woman to share his troubles.-Cincin-
natl Enquirer
She-Who was 1t that said "There's
no such word as fail?" He-Oh, don't
remember; some smart Alec who never
tried to open car window, | suppose.
-Yonkers Statesman.
Mrs. Fussanfeather-I understand
that Mr.. Tallman kissed you on the
stoop last night. Miss Fussanfeather
Why, yes, mamma; he's SO tall he
had to.-Yonkers Statesman.
Nurse-Johnnie, the stork has
brought you little baby. Wouldn't
you like to see your little brother?
Johnnie But I'd like to see
the stork.-Stockholm Kasper.
81 have Just taken a life to save my
own" what do you meanW If l
hadn't taken that Life of Grant the
woman book agent would have talked
me to death. h."-Cleveland Plaindealer.
Wheeler-W -Whew! Isn't this day a
scorcher? Walker-It has been dis
agreeable, exasperating, muggy, infer
nally hot day. but l would not call 1t
so mean a. name as that.-lndianapolis
Journal.
George, l fear you are marrying me
just because my uncle left me for
tune" mo. my precious. I'd marry
YOU lust the same as If any other
friend. had left it to you. u.'-Boston
Traveller.
"You have, aw, no leisure claws in
this country, aw," remarked the in
terrogative visitor. you can't have
seen a room full of government clerks
in action" replied the native Ameri-
can.-Life.
Excited Wife-Oh, professor, the
cook has fallen and broken her collar
bone. Professor-Discharge her at
Il hat m
she broke anything more.-Detroit
FreePress.
Look atShat girlw exclaimed Mrs.
Prim at seashore; ''she might as
wep.have nothing on as that bathing
suit!' "Never mind, my dear, III coy-
er her with my glasses said Mr.. Prim
sympathetically, suiting the action to
the word-Ben Franklin.
"why," said the patriot, ''the United
States would have a picnic with Japan
If she objected to our annexation of
tho Hawaiian islands" "Of course"
echoes Joe Cose, land the islands
would furnish the sandwiches. PHIL
adelphia North American.
81 WONDER" said the man of statis-
tical turn, II wonder how much pow
der Is destroyed daily in useless sa-
lutes?" There must be a lot" said
the, frivolous girl. But l suppose
women will go on kissing one another
Just the same indianapolis Journal.
The Doctor-Mrs. Brown has sent for
me to go and see her boy, and | must
go at once. His Wife-What is the
matter with the boy? The Doctor
don't know, but Mrs. Brown has Il book
on "What to Do Before the Doctor
Comes" and l must hurry up before
she does it.-Medical Record.
Dear" said the Senator's wife, the
papers are accusing you of letting the
stock market influence your vote. 1T
is lie," roared the statesman, as he
pounded the table with his fist. "All
| have done in that direction was to al
low my vote to influence my dealings
in the stock market t"-Indlanapo.is
Journal