davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
TRICKS ON THE TEACHERS.

The other day a pupil in one of the
public schools asked the teacher to do
little example in grammar, and sine J
then what seemed at first to be IL sim
pie problem has had the serious con
sideration Of all the pedagogues in
the community, and it has been
unanimously agreed that there is DO
rul le in grammar to cover the point
raised. The youngster's position was
this:
1t is two two miles to Woodfords.
Now please write under that sentence
There are two twos in the above sen
tence.'n
That is What the hoy said He did
not submit the problem in writing,
and when the teacher tried to follow
his injunction she found out the
reason why. 1t dawned on her that
there were not two twos, neither were
there two tos, and how to express in
writing what was easy enough to do
verbally SHE ascertained to be impos-
sible.
The boy responsible for the forego-
ing must be near relative to the
youth who asked his teacher how to
spell Paris green, and when she re-
piled, "Pa Par, is, Paris, green,
green, Paris green" retorted:
No, you're wrong; you can't spell
Paris green, or blue, or any other
color. You can't spell it anything but
Paris. "-Portland (Me.) Argus.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
NETER 81 TIST'IED.

When spell of drouthy weather
Comes along to veN the soul,
And the roads are ground To powder
by the wheels that O'cr them roll;
1t Is then there's Widespread yruubling,
Loud expressions OF disgust,
And the cause of indignation
Is the all-pervading dust.
Every vehicle in passing
Sends aloft a dusty cloud,
That at once goes seeking places
Where no dirt is e'er allowed
Through the curtains it comes Sitting,
1t comes stealing through the door
And the angry housewives scOlding
As she sweeps it out the door.
1t plays havoc with the faces
That left home SO bright and clean,
And when beauty peeps at mirror
Dire results therein are seen.
Grimy etreaks. alas. disfigure
Cheeks she tinted like he rose,
And dozen dusty smudgcS
She discovers on her nose.
And the chappie's heart is broken
As H. gances ut his shoes,
Which an hour ago he polished,
And the waste of time he rues.
Now with dust they're dim and yellow,
Or perChance are white as lime,
And he's forced TO seek At sinner"
Who relieves him of that dime.
And the people who go riding
In the open trolley car
Find breeze, but get II dusting
That will all enjoyment mar.
Eyes will smart and blink and water,
Ears will be another mark,
And the riders will he growing
When from cars they diSembarh.
When it's dry and dusty weather
People bitterly complain.
And we often hear them wishing
For good, old-faS hioned rain:
But when showers that they yearned for
Come along and cool their blood
They again Indulge in Grumhliug.
And its then about the mud.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
4 TRUE INCIDENT.

There had been a smash UP and the
young bicyclist lay insensible on the
ground in the tangled wreck of his
wheel.
With clatter and bang the surge on
of the bicycle ambulance corps arriv-
ed on the scene. The sight met his
eyes and blauched even his stern face.
Hurriedly jumping TO the ground,
he ran to where the youth Icy groan-
ing.
After II minutes careful examina-
ton the surgeon arose. Amy hope?"
asked bystander.
"Oh. it'll come around all right"
he answered. Tire punctured, FIVE
spokes out, handle-b bar broken, rear
wheel smashed to pieces and one pedal
missing, but with careful attention it
can be fixed up as good as new. Same
make OF wheel as mine," and with
that the ambulance surgeon remount-
ed and sped away, while sympathiz-
ing citizens carried the youth into his
house and tried to staunch the flow OF
blood. Judge.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
A GEORGIA GIRLS OPINION.

a little Georgia schoolgirl was asked
for a composition ON The Confeder.
ate Veteran" A few days thereafter
she handed in the following:
The Confederate veteran is one
that fought and bled and died for his
country. He is sometimes on one leg
and sometimes on two. The State
gives him enough pension to keep
him in tobacco. Then the State
builds home and sells it before he
can get i'll it. My pa says he is
veteran. He was wounded by having
a leg sawed off in Confederate saw
mill while making collins to bury SOL
diers in. The State don't help my pa
much. and my pa says d the
Statenl
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
John BoISiano's Horse Fly Liquid Is
1he Rest.

None genuine without our signature on each
can. ..Jobn B1lgano.' Beware of false lmita-
tions. We manufacture nothing but the best.
Drives flies and insects of all kinds off horses,
COWS. dogs, &c. Pint, Csc; quart, SOC; gallon,
s1 80. We also manufacture J. b. House Fly
LIQUID. Drives mosquitoes, reaches, ants
cbinches. and all other insects out of the house
permanently. Bottles, Oc and 25c.; pint,
ouart- 81 .25. The John Bolgisno Co, Manu-
focturers. 21 East Lombard ST., Baltimore Md.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
FIVE GEMS TOKrH NE4DING.

We speak of secret sin; all sins is
secret; when it becomes open it is
crime.
The true reward of workman il
not his wages, but the consciousness
of having done good job.
Think of God not as one before
whom we shall stand, but az one be-
fore whom we do stand every day,
We dread the open shame of the day
of Judgment, but really our present
inner complacency is more terrible.
What we call forces are only Gods
methods, and they are as secret as he
is. mo man hath seen force at any
time.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
Notice to Tresnassers.

All persons are hereby fOrewarned from
trespa ssing on the lands of the undersigned, or
to hold in possession any property which may
be stolen from me. The law will be strictly
enforced against all offenders
JACOB LIE EZES.
ChurcbviIle, Md.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
JOHN A. YOUNG,
PRACTICAL
Matchmaker and ODdCial.

Twenty-Five years as watch repairer, 8
years apprentice. one year under instructions,
316 years a foreman and the balance of my
time in business for myself, during II Il this time
| have made a study of optics, fitting Spec
tacles and Eye Glasses properly, as they should
be fitted.
The lenses are ground to their proper axis
and are fitted and adjusted by myself in Spec
tacles and Eye Glasses of Gold, Silver, Nickel,
Steel, Rubber or Zylonite frames, and am re-
sponsible myself for all mistakes.
In fitting Lenses TO the eye my speciality is in
Myopia, Hyperopa, PrcsDyOpia and Astigma-
tism, which are near-sghted, far-Sighted. old
sighted and poor sighted; Nearly all cases of
astigmausu " cen in children, causing pain in
the eve rubbing of the eyelids, pain above the
eye-br owS. ada che, letters running together,
So Itave complete set of instruments and
test cards which Iuse to correct the sight in the
Young as well as in the old or middle-aEed.
w@I refer to DR.. VIM. S. Richardson, DIR. E.
Hall Richardson, DR.. w. B. Munnikhuysen and
Dr. ]. Ward Scott.
JOHN A. YOUNG,
16mh Main Street, Bel Air. Nd.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
LiROR IN YIN.

The strained effort to do too much
is one cause of the large amount of
slipshod, inefficient work that all de-
plore, and yet accept. No one can
give OF his best until he has learned
what to lay aside as well as what to
do. Others fail to give their
best by attempting to do what is be-
yond them. They might have sue.
ceeded well, and done good service in
one direction; but, scorning this. they
are doing very poor work-which
neither benefits others, nor reflects
honor upon themselves, in some other
line. Thus, a first-rate builder who
is needed in the community is sacri-
feed to make third-rate architect,
who is comparatively valueless. Men
who might have made their mark as
mechanics become inferior business
men, or others who have a talent for
commercial pursuits spoil their value
by rushing into professions or politics.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
Notice..

The regular meetings of the Bel Air Bicycle
Club will be held every Tuesday night at eight
o'clock Persons wishing TO join must appear
before the Board of Electors at the next meet
ing on August 10.
HARRY S. CARVER, Pres.
s. A. HOBLITZELL. JR Sec
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
FROM An Old 4RTTHaTETIC.

Speaking OF old fashioned problems,
one of our friends of Springfield, Ills,
sends three queer examples which ap-
peared i'll Adams Arithmetic more
than so years ago. No doubt the boys
and girls of those days puzzled long
and tediously over the kits, cats, sacks
and wives and never stopped to think
whether or not frog could climb
well curb. Read over the problems
and see if you can answer them:
IF herring and half cost a penny
and half, what will II pence buyI'
IF frog at the bottom of well 30
feet deep, climbs up feet every day
and falls back feet every night, how
many days will it take to climb out of
the well?n
"As 1 was going to ST. Ives l met
seven wives. Each wife had seven
sacks. In each sack were seven cats,
and each cut had seven kits. Kits,
cats, sacks and wives, how many were
going to st. Ives?'
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
THE EGIS ANDiNTELLIGENCER.
Is Published Every Fridayty
FRANK E. GORRELL.


Transient tAduertisenentS.-On Square, 3
insertions or less $1.5O. Each subsequent in
seruion 25 cents. Longer advertisements in
the same proportion. a space equal TO six
lines makes II square. Figure work double
price.
Obituaries and Personal Communications
will be inserted ut 10 cents per line.
Yearly Advertisements ut Special Rates.
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
A MODERN SOLOMON.

President Kruger is a veritabIe
Solomon. A man in South Africa left
his property to be equally divided
between two sons. Not being able to
agree, they decided to let President
Kruger arbitrate. He said TO the
elder, You are the elder, are you
noti'
Yes" was the answer.
80 you shall divide the property"
This pleased the elder immensely.
"Iou are the younger" continued
Kruger to the other, 80 you shall
have the first choice
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24
TTME TO SITEAR OFF.

a little school girl in a rural district
was assigned a composition on TEN
perance,' and the following is the re-
suit:
"Temperance is more better than
whisky. Whisky is 10 cents a drink,
and lots of it. My pa drinks whisky.
Que night lie came home late and my
ma went out ard cut some hickories
and walloped him good Then she
ducked his head in tub of soapsuds
and locked him up in the barn. And
the next morning my pa said he reckon
he'd swear off -
The aegis & intelligencer., 1897-09-24

Doctor-My good woman, does
your son always stuttel. Mother
Not always, sir, only when he at
tempts to talk.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
Attempt to Push the Libel
Repeal Section.
SEVERAL MOVES ARE BALKED,
Doings of the Nations Law
Makers.
Other Late News of the Day
By Wire.

Springfield. Jan. 27.-A number Of
bills from Chicago prepared by the
drainage board, arrived this morn
ing. They are all amendments to
the drainage law. In the house.
Revell's bill, the repeal Of the libel
law Of the last session, came up as a
special order. A motion to strike
out the enacting clause was defeated.
Revell moved to make the conside-
ration Of the bill on the second read
ing the special order for tomorrow
morning, which was lost AZ to 81.
On motion of Selby the bill was
made special order for Tuesday
morning with the understanding
that it remain in order of the second
reading subject to amendment. The
Illinois senate is in session Just 10
minutes transacting routine busi-
ness.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
The Nations Law Makers.

Washington, Jan. 27.-In the
house Daniord called up the confer.
ence report on the immigration bill.
An agreement was reached by which
q vote is to be taken on the adoption
OF the report at 4:15 this afternoon,
Danford then made the opening ar.
gument in support of the report. In
the senate the committee on foreign
relations had the arbitration treaty
under consideration this morning,
but failed to reach any conclusion.
1t will meet again Saturday.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
ABBREVIATED TELEGRAMS.

The glove contest bill introduced IN
the Nevada legislature to permit the
fight between Corbett and FTitzsimmons
to take place in that state has passed
the assembly.
Senator Lodge has received a large
number of protests from the west
against the immigration bill, which he
says are worked up by the steamship
companies.
The condition Of Senator George. of
Mississippi, who is i'll at Washington. is
said to be satisfactory and his physi-
clans reports him to be holding his
own.
Miss Lulu Allen. eldest daughter of
United States Senator Allen, was mar
ried yesterday TO Daniel Lynch. of
Platte Center, Seb.. al Madison. Neb.
Hon. John p. Jones was reelected
United States senator forNevada yester-
day.
The Star furnace. jackson. O.. burned.
caused by the bursting Of a stack Hugh
Martin and Frank Davis. workmen.
were burned = death.
The First National bank. Of Olympia.
Wash, has closed. Liabilities. SlcO. ESQ:
assets. S226.ooo. The failure was caused
by the withdrawal Of tie state deposit
Of $4,000.
With the end Of the present week one
half of the session Of the Oregon legis-
| lature VIII have passed and no business
whatever has yet been done. owing "a
| the difficulty over a senator.
BY an accident on the Inter-ColoniaI
| line in New brunswick Arthur Edce.
comb, Of St Johns. postal clerk. ana
| Mrs. Fatrijurn. of Bloomfield. y. b
were killed and half dozen severely
| injured.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27

In the course Of the discussion about
the lnd.an schools Murphy OF Arizona
questioned the good results OF the pres
ent Indian educational system so far a.
IL related TO those who were returned
to their reservations. He declared that
every Apache who was educated in the
east and who returned to his reserya.
ton was weari.E the brecch clout to-
day. Curtis OF Kansas paid high tri-
butte TO the work the educated Indians
were doing In Kansas and other states.
Have net the Indians developed great
Powers in foot ball?' asked Grosvenor.
And is not foot hail considered in our
modern colleges the highest test OF cul-
ture and civilization tLauEhter.1
Hartman of Montana offered an
amendment which produced q howl Of
laughter. recalling as IL did the recent
exposures IN connection with the motor
ious Seeley dinner in New York. It
provided for an appropriation of si.coo.-
o0o.o00 for the education and civiiiza-
tion OF the Seeiey savnEes "of the Man
haitian reservation" The hnuss greeted
the reading Of the amendment with q
hearty laugh. Hartman made no re-
marks upon it and it was ruled out on
the point % order that it was new leg
islation."
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
Jonc. Hcp,i.. 90 ,s,I,. r.m.c,,,.

Washington. Jan. Ex-senator Jones
has replied 10 The Idaho Democrats with
n telegram stating that his action and
that Of the prominent Democratic mem
bers of the national committee and 9TH
ers ''is In no sense an interference in To-
cal affairs. Prominent and leading Re-
publicans abandoned their great party
and gave hearty support 60 the plat
form and candidates Of the Chicago
convention, and it would in my opinion
he an exceedingly narrow and undemo-
cratic course for the party 60 fail to
testify its high appreciation of such
conduct"
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
PERRY HEATH VISITS HANNA.
Latter Goes to Canton to See the Major0
Question of Senatorship.


Cleveland, Jan. 27.-Perry Heath, Of
Muncie, Ind, who had charge Of the
literary bureau at the Republican head
quarters in Chicago during the late
campaign, had a long conference with
Chairman Hanna yesterday. Ever since
the legislative reunion and banquet at
Columbus there has been a growing
feeling in well-informed political cir
cles that the naming of Hanna as the
successor Of Sherman by Governor
Bushnell is well nigh certainty. This
is not alone confined to Hanna's friends,
but is row even admitted by those
who have opposed him as a candidate
for the senate. Governor Bushnell"
said a politician of national reputa-
ton, has everything to gain if he
names Mr.. Hanna and nothing to lose
On the other hand, in the face of the
general sentiment in favor OF the lat
ter, should he select some other man for
the place, it would mean political sui
cide.''
Canton, Jan. 27.-Major Mckinley
had many visitors yesterday, including
". z. Mann, Of Pinckneyville, Ills, who
called to talk over Illinois matters, and
it is believed was here in the interest of
Senator Cullom. But the most i'm
portant visitor was Chairman Hanna,
who arrived last evening. He Will re-
main until some time today. but has
nothing to say about why he is here.
A party from Brooklyn. y. Y, also
came to see Mckinley. They presented
Representative Wilson's (of Brooizlyn)
name for a cabinet position. On Feb
% the major and his wife will hold 4
goodbye reception for friends in Cam
ton.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
uEE KaSAKA MAJESTY RECEIVES.
oucen Liiiuokaiani Visited iy . lot Of rair
and Curious r-upi-.


Washington. Jan g. - Ex-o-ecn
Liliuokaiani had n reception yesterday
afternoon for two hours - her rooms in
the Shoreham. Il was her purpose to
confine the reception mainly q rrvsEri-
per men ard FPch persons In Official
life IA cared 80 call However. IN,
ladies in the hotai soon rass,,l t;ls nsvs
OF the affair 10 shriT friends elazNacrs
and in Consequence u. small parlar
set apart for the call o. was we'll
crowded with rcrspnH mostly OF the fair
sex. and generally animated ~ 9 l.
in= CT curiosity t. Fsc ihe woman vino
had been n queen AMI had nlicd a page
in the history of Polynesia. The queen
was assisted in the rec rtioa Il vt.!fsra
by her lady In waiting. Mss Ria
Sahaolciua and by her SECRETARY and
agent. Joseph II. Heieiuhc. both native
Havaiians.
MIR. Palmer. acting as her chamber
lain. received the callers at the door
way and presented them 60 the rcsliv-
ing party. The que vas bcc5riir ely
attired in n black silk rovn trimmed
with royal purple and bore herself with
great dignity. responding apiiy to the
salutations oG her callers and having
n pleasant word for every one. Whether
or not she will again receive the public
in Washington Is not known. and wien
she was asked the question how long
she Intended 20 remain here sh, rc-
piled that she did not know: she found
1t so pleasant IN washinrtnn that she
had as yet given no thought 60 de-
parture
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
Eanquet to the "EasY Boss.n

Albany, n. Y. Jan. 27.-The Repub-
licans of the state rendered a banquet
to Thomas c. Platt, senator-elect from
New York, at Harmanus Bleecker hall
last night, at which were present all the
Republican state officers, all the party
leaders in the state. and many Repub-
licans of national Importance. Covers
were laid for nearly 1000, while as many
more looked on from the galleries and
listened to the speech-making. Platt
made it the occasion of his formal ac-
ceptance of the senatorship to succeed
David B. Hill
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
WOULD BE LONESOME,
White Thinks, il Anybody Could lie Got to
Serve-Cannon Coins a PhIase.

There was no purpose so far as he
knew, White proceeded, to oppose this
measure, as it was felt to be harmless,
while it might satisfy its promoters
who might feel that it kept some Of
their promises; yet with this act they
were doomed to certain failure. The
senator referred to the ''lonesomeness"'
of the proposed commission. going about
and seeking nations with whom to con-
fer. He doubted if any one would be
appointed to this commission unless
some large emolument was attached to
the places. II was futile movement.
declared the senator. and having re-
lieved themselves of the financial ques-
ton by this harmless device its pro-
moters would then turn their attention
to levying more taxes.
Cannon urged an amendment direct
ing the president of the United States
10 call the conference, and recitinE that
the purpose was toward securing a
ratio between 10 to / and Is to J. lie
said the wolcott bill merely relieved
Mckinley from all responsibility. Ieav
ing him the mere administrative duty
of appointing commissioners. Tpc.e
was a belief. he said. that Mckinley.
in his holy OF holes" entertains a
conviction favorable to bimetallism. and
the bill should be made broad enough
to permit the coming president 20 aid
in the accomplishment Of This great end.
instead of retiring into a passive and
administrative attitude. As TO inter-
national conferences in general. Cannon
said he had little faith in them. and &:
would be about as easy to ralvanize
life into one of the Pharoahs as to get
any definite results from such \ con-
ference. The senator referred also To
| Wolcotts trip to Europe. and said little
was to be expected from this "du-
letarte dalliance" with the great ques-
ton involved.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27

A little group of advanced women,
girls with strong ideas of the rights Of
women, believers in their free competi-
tion with men and ropudiators of the
idea that women should be treated with
more Difference than men, were talking
when one of them began:
"Oh, girls, what DO you suppose? l
bought two men drink" "
"You did:" exclaimed the chorus in
admiration.
81 did"
"Not in salcc:. hopc:" anxioutly
inquired one who was not as advanced
as the rest
mo; Of course not. Il was in drug
store"
''Oh, DO tell us all about it!'
"You sec, was walking along the
street with two men, when one of them
suggested that We go in drug store
and get drink. made up my mind
that would not go i'll drug store and
let any man buy me soda water. / de-
termined that l should insist upon my
rights as a woman and buy the drinks.
So said would so if they would let
me pay for it
''You brave girl"
'They treated it as a Joke at first.
Tho very idea! But I told them nv
principles. and finally they agreed, al.
though the mean things laughed. Then
we went in. You don't know how afraid
Twas that they would pay for the drink:
anyhow. But I was too quick. When
the clerk laid down the check, jus,
grabbed it, end wouldn't give it I'D
and when wo went ont / reached tht
cashier first and laid down Just the
right amount. The cashier seemed sur
prised. don't see why. But actually
bought soda water for two men. Wha
do you think Of that?"
"You were herov' declared the CIR
who was the first to recover her breath
''Scme day your sex will erect monu
ment in your hcno-. Chicago Times
Herald.
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
PROHIBITION AGAINST A JUDGE.
Prosecutor in n Mine Riot Murder Case
Saws lie Is Preiudiced.

Denver. Colo, Jan. 27.-Yesterday aft
ernoon the supreme court of Colorado
issued a temporary writ Of prohibition
restraining Judge j. r. Overs, of Lead
Vile. from presiding at the trial of J.
r. Arburn; i. J. Dewar. prosecuting
attorney of the Leadville Miners un-
ion, and G. r. Handy, charged with the
murder of jerry O'Keefe, the Leadville
fireman, during the riots last October
The petition on which the writ was
granted was filed by Attorney General
Carr, and was supported by the affida-
wits of twenty prominent mine owners
Gnd leading citizens of Leadville, in
cluding the prosecuting officers. alleging
that Judge Overs is prejudiced in favor
of the defendants. The writ is return
able next Saturday. The trial was be-
gun yesterday at Leadviile before Judge
Overs
Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1897-01-27
Beyaa's Ovation Ia tho South.

Austio, Tex, Jan. CIV. J.
Bryan visited the Legislature this
morning. Ali business of both
houses suspended while he made a
speech which aroused enthusias IN
1t was directed chiefly to the ques-
tion OF corporation influence and leg
isla,ion against it. He favored law
prohibiting any corporation from
contributing to the campaign fund.