The Monitor-register., 1897-10-22

the art was SO finely exemplifed in
the brilliant salons of the beautiful Re-
cam1er and clever Nine. Mora; where
men OF letters and women of mark met
weekly to discuss the topics of the
times, to follow the abstruse questions
OF the day, and where sparkle and bril-
llancy seemed, as it were, to flash from
each person. Subjects, although weighty
III themselves, became as clear as
lucid water when handled by these in
tellectual spirits who had made them
an object of research for years. In rooms
where these receptions were held the
furniture was often out at the elbows
and the curtains faded and worn. Mel
Their a tempting collation. nor fashionable
music was held out as an additional
charm. Still, when the time came, they
were generally crowded with men and
women who delighted in the "feast of
reason and flow of SOUL"
Nowadays true hospitality is really
at a very low ebb, especially in big CEN
tiers where there are axes to grind every
day in the year, SO that to meet ones
acquaintance it must be at a formal
dinner or company luncheon, or perhaps
an afternoon reception, where guests
appear, stay a few moments and then
depart. The old fashioned way of break
ing bread informally or the request,
Come and take salt with me in my at
tic, " has long since passed away. To
the woman who fully understands the
art of giving good dinners her invita-
lions are sent out at least some seven
days in advance-that is, if the function
is a formal me-.
But formal OF informal affairs of his
sort are just about the same in methods
devised for entertaining. The chief
point required is that care should be
taken as to those selected for the feast
and that they should be SO we'll grouped
in topics of conversation that an inter-
est will be given to all. The clever
hostess is often the go between, amiable
to be sure, but without doubt the ruler
of the occasion, insisting that each
guest should have a chance to offer an
opinion which shall be listened to with
out interruption. In the giving of social
functions, particularly dinners, CONT
mental people, who perhaps are the finest
OF entertainers, declare that one hour is
the allotted time for any formal meal.
At the expiration Of hat period, be it
breakfast, dinner or luncheon, the con-
versation generally lags, and what was
a delight in the beginning becomes in
the end a bore.
Afternoon teas have had a long reign,
and, although still in favor, are often
stupid affairs, owing to the fact that
the hostess is a poor one
OF all social gayeties the afternoon
reception is the one where, being a pro-
miscuous assembly, introductions should
be given. We all know that women as
a class are sticklers for propriety and
are unwilling to recognize each other
unless formally presented, however
much the rooftree is respected. AS for
the American man, naturally he has
but little time for everyday social
affairs, however enjoyable they may be,
and it is a very wise conclusion that
even in the big c~enters, where distances
are SO great and time so precious, it is
really a compliment for a man to call
and pay his respects.
Afternoon functions, to be a success.
require generalship on the part of the
hostess. A word here OF an introduction
there, is much appreciated, so that each
guest at least should receive some small
share of attention, and if a line like this
is we'll followed out ~"wallhowers''
will indeed be scarce in that drawing
room.
In all gatherings where men and wo-
men assemble naturally the touch and
go OF small talk generally occupies
most of the time, yet underneath this
crust of vapid sayings there is always an
intellectual longing that creeps up to-
ward the surface and takes a hold ever
in the dullest of places.
Perhaps in the giving of social func-
lions, especially if it is a sit down affair,
a tactful hostess might to each Of her
followers give surreptitiously q slight
knowledge of the person presented. A
few words will suffice for the woman
of ordinary culture, who will her know
what topics to introduction it is a
woman's prerogative always to com
mence conversation-making for the
time interesting themes and thereby
adding to the comfort of her hostess,
who will gladly thank her afterward
for her wise consideration. The clever
hostess is n that is eagle eyed-in
fact, a veritable Cyclops, who at a glance
takes in all shortcomings and brings
out the salient points of those who will
do her credit. Another important duty
is that the hostess should consider the
strength of her guest and by that be
governed. A restful hour at noon and
alone, undisturbed, is a boon to any Wis
itor. To entertain a person all day is
inhuman. There are times for retire
ment which for both parties are a re-
lief. In fact the city woman generally
considers herself exceedingly lucky if
her visitor is one who can amuse her
self at least some hours out of the
"a, reserving, of course, the evenings
for special pleasures in which the host
as well as the hostess joins in for the
amusement of their guest.
But with country entertaining the
art is quite Oh another plane. There
good form is perhaps more difficult than
IN town. Invitations booked for any sea-
son should be sent out some three weeks
LII advance, SO that an acceptance or q
d~eclination can be promptly received.
Above all, let invitations state the day
and hour for arrival and let the time
also for departure be explicitly given.
This is only due to other guests who
generally make their preparations time
ly ones as far as visits are concerned.
At all country houses the guestroom
should be fully equipped with the home
comforts SO necessary to a guest, such
as the well appointed writing desk,
comfortable bath robe and warm slip
pers.
Well bred entertainers at all times
allow their domestic duties to go Oh as
usual, believing that any guest admit
ted to the hearthstone will be willing
to conform to the rules which govern
the home.
1t is bad form to urge a visitor to at
tend weekly or even Sunday services at
church, to insist upon long walks which
she does not care to take or drives which
at certain hours INDUCED in are sure to
result in a bad headache. In all such
matters guests should do as they prefer.
There are times when a hostess should
be deaf, dumb and blind. Ignore, if pos
sible, the peculiarities of all guests.
Unpleasant humors can be easily ward