The copper country evening news. [volume] (Calumet, Mich.) 18??-1907, 1897-10-05
A JOKE ON ARTEMUS WARD.
The Humorist Got the Worst of II In IA
Bit of Horseplay.


The Humorist Got the Worst of 1t In IA
Bit of Horseplay.
The Bookman has an interesting article
on Artemus Ward, dealing at considera bile
length with his experiences in London
When no made his first appearance in that
city, he enriched his programmes with "a
note explaining that he would call on citi-
zens at their residences and explain any
jokes that they did not understand, and it
Is said that there was reason enough in
such an offer. in view of the fact that
John Bright. the eminent statesman, was
reported to have remarked after attending
one of the humorist's performances:
II must say cant see what people find
to enjoy in this lecture. The information
is meager and is presented in desultory
disconnected manner. In fact, can't help
seriously questioning some of the state
ments.
Artemus Ward was fond of telling sto-
fies and jokes at his own expense, and he
had habit when upon tho lecture plat
form of purpoSely making people laugh at
his own awkwardncss, but he had one cx-
perience that he never referred to Dur-
ing part of the time that ho lived in
Cleveland he resided at fashionable
boarding house on Seneca street and was
in the habit Of cutting up all sorts of ca
pers there, to the amusement sometimes,
but as often TO the CONSERVATION, of the
other borders, most of whom looked upon
him as II half baked fool.
One of his fayorto jokes was to scare
women nearly to death 10y pretending to
fall down stairs. The parlor whore tho
boarders congreGated was connected by q
large arch with the hall, where the stair
way was, practically making one big room
of both. Every time new boarder or u
stranger happened TO bo present Mr..
Browne, as he was known around the
house, would cough at the top of the stair
way to attract attention, then pretend TO
trip on something and go tumbling head
long downward always managing to
catch the railing and thus escape injury.
The women would, of course, yell and
make Il great fuss over him whom he picked
himself up, and he would generally man
age to get off some droll remark that
would set everybody laughing.
But this sort of thing got tiresome after
awhile, and one day some of the men
boarders decided to stop it. a young lady
had just arrived at the house, and it was
a foregone conclusion that Browne would
take his customary tumble at the first OPP
portunity. So, promising the landlady
that they would have things properly re-
paired after the trouble was over, the jok-
or's enemies sawed tho spindles in the bal
ustrade almost in two, leaving the rail so
that u slight wrench would break it loose.
That evening all the boarders congre-
gated I'm the parlor, the newly arrived
young lady, who had been let into the Sc
cret, among them. They didn't have long
TO wait for their victim In passing up TO
his room Browne SAW that a stralecr was
present, and, after making his toilet, he
started to go down stairs. He coughed
loudly several times while passing through
the upper hall, and then when he saw
that everybody was looking at him, STUN
bled and shot out into the air.
But when he grasped the rail of the bal
ustrade there was sharp crack, followed
by crash, and the man who afterward
became famous as A. Ward lay stunned at
the bottom of the stairs, with skinned
elbow and bleeding nose.
That ended the stairway joke, and
Browne soon moved TO another boarding
house.