Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1897-06-17

E1hOthOi tiiiASs oNi- -os = 49,
twister suck sixty gallons of molasses
out of a barrel in front of grocery
store and distribute to every family in
town who had bucket out on the back
porch for the milk man.
He cleared his throat and began
again: ''Back in the JOS we had
terrible cyclone in western Kansas.
1t blew the cracks out of the fences.
pulled a cistern out of the ground.
moved township line and changed the
day of the week.
This last fusillade induced one of
the listeners to speak up. He said: 'I
do not know much about cyclones, but
once when l was at sea saw water
spout pick up tons and tons of water
and carry it mile and"
"Hold on!" cried the Kansan. "If you
are going to degrade this conversation
to the level of common lying contest,
l will retire. And he got up and
walked away pompousiy.
AnOIQ0E man Will du idCO
told this story and expected people to
believe it:
"I was out in Kansas last summer
and the first cyclone, of course. went
down in the cellar, like other folks.
The house was soon blown away. The
next thing knew the cellar went. too,
rolling over and over like silk hat.
was soon spilled out. With infinite
labor l crawled back in the teeth of
the wind, intending to take refuge in
the hole the cellar cams out of. To
my CONSERVATION found that that had
blown away also"
A prominent Kansan is credited with
telling this.
"Tell you what's a fact, l have
known 1t to blow twelve days and
nights on a stretch and hold sheep
up against the side of the barn until
he starved to death"
Probably the story which better
illustrates the position of the populist
farmer in Kansas than any told in re-
cent years is this:
Kansas man visiting in the east.
farmers. Look at her vast prairies
covered with crops so heavy that they
make whole counties sink down in the
middle. Look at her corn crops, so
vast that it crowded township lines
into the river.
Some Kansas man-at the popuiist
meeting in his own neighborhood-:
Fellow -sufferers-Dry weather, Hes
sian flies and goldbugs prey like vam-
pires on our State. Our once fair
state is plastered over with mortgages
so heavy that we have to bore a hole
through them with an augur in order to
plant corn. Rouse, ye slaves
A country editor not far from Sum
merheld, just after receiving a cord of
wood and big supply of vegetables
on subscription, dipped his pen in the
ink and flashed this off: s'When you
| talk about state better than Kapsas,
every potato winks its eye, every beet
gets red in the face. every onion get
stronger, every oat field is shocked,
the rye strokes its beard, the corn
pricks up its ears, and every foot of
| ground kicks.
There has been a premium offered
for the capture of the man who start
ed this clever lie: "a Kansas farmer
planted his farm i'll popcorn. and
gathered it into his barn. The barn
took fire, the corn popped and filled a
ten-acre field. His old mare, thinking
it a snow storm. lay down and froze to
death. :"
In discussing the question in western
Kansas not long ago, a citizen from
the short grass country said: 81 think
that Kansas is in need of agreat deal
of irrigation. There are times when
it Is so dry in the western part of the
state that you have to soak hog over
night to make him hold swill. There
| are places where water is wet only on
one side. l know a place where the
owner of ferryboat hauls water eleven
months in the year to keep his ferry
running. Why, water is so scarce
there that the men won't drink it. The
cause of this drouth is that the
railroads of Kansas have cornered the
water supply of the state to put into
their stock. -
| L.. :. ..othar dro1,th cf,,-,, told b.,