The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1897-12-20
HOME THOUGHTS.
The etiquette Of Domestic I.ifs-Ths De-
iuslon O1uC0mpany AIAnnsra.p


as he pleases in his own home, I'd like
to know whatit is good for. was the sin
cere exclamation OF u schoolhoy whose
extreme courtesy had been commented
tTeme courtesy had been commented
on by a lady lately his hostess. His
grained mother. In repeating these
compliments to him, said that she was
particularly pleased, because his care
less habits at home SO often caused her
regret and anxiety. The above quota
lion WAS his candid expression as 10
the folly OF exercising pollteness and
Difference In family life, Nor was he at
all an exceptional or ISOLATED example
OF those who are scrupulously careful
OF everV conventional decorum among
strangers, gentle 20 the aged, kindly TO
children, thouahtfui W the comfort and
convenience OF the households in which
they visit, and yet steadtastiy ignoring
every one OF these delightful things as
soon as the home door Is closed upon
them.
Nor was he only an exponent OF n
boys ideas, 1t may be too sweeping an
assertion To say that he exemplities the
conduct and belief OF half the men and
women In perhaps the majority OF fam
lilies. yet surely the number Is not small
who think as he,did and live as he liv-
ed. And the reconsideration. the rough
speech, the readiness to give trouble,
the satisfying OF self and personal pre-
dlction, "harks back" to a native bar
barism, which Is kept alive In the heart,
however perfect the veneer OF social
convention may appear,
There are only too many households
in which 3 perpetual friction brings out
sparkle OF irritation, which mar the
whole mutual existence Of peace and
rest. There are houses in which order
and beauty would be wholly lost II II
were not for the patient vigilance OF
one, on whom the burden OF restoring
the symmetry Of things falls heavilF,
while lending helping hands 90 the SER
wants, whose work Is doubled by the
careless selhshness of others.
Much influence of early training Is
lost by the years spent IN colleges and
schools, where for ten months out of the
twelve the idea OF the mutual owner
ship and responsibility OF home is set
aside. To young men this is especially
tho case. but girls fall largely into the
came way OF looking at things, though
their pursuits do not bring in their train
such palpsble disorder and disregard
for rules made for the benefit OF all con-
cerned.
On summer day the delicate beauty
and reposeful charm of country
house can be obiIterated In hall an
hour by the arrival OF the young peo-
pie, who throw hats. caps, sticks, capes,
bats hither and thither, draw UP the
blinds, let In the sun, throw themselves
on the lounges. order glasses and pitch
ers and whatever they want brought
hither and thither, regardless OF the
apick-coming meal or the dainty neat
ness OF their surroundings.
In winter the cosey den to which the
tired father turns for his hours rest
before dinner may be made to resemble
the dreary result of dynamite eXp1o-
sion by the brief occupancy OF his boys,
who never cast a though; toward hts
comfort or his Homecoming,
Where n sense OF true regret and
modification win arise over the slight
est delay or Interruption caused In q
house whore young man or woman is
a guest. not so much as word OF apol-
ogy will be Youchsafed at home when
a meal has either been spoiled by
waiting, or entirely reserved for the
convenience Of those who could have
made the meal cheerful and orderly bF
q promptness which would have cost no
EFFORT. Just a remembrance OF mother
and home comfort which would as
suredly have been bestowed on n stran-
ger hostess, would have saved much
labor and given great pleasure,
To take the most comfortable seat, In
volv!ng the pleasantant light whereby
to read or the coolest breeze Oh hot
day. and Keep It unmoveu If Il IL oaiy
one OF the family who enters; 10 alter
the temperature OF the room Without an
appeal to others, who may dread more
heat or cold seems to be on Inherent
right In certain peoples minds,
Why should the meal prepared In a
parents house. perhaps with especial
thought Of each Individual preference
be allowed to be desplseG and rudely
found fault With. so that sense OF
general dlstaste and doubt arises In ev-
cry ones mind Why should questions
OF domestic order and economy be ar
Eued across the board which Is meant
90 be the railying-place OF the family
for physical comfort and loving inter-
course? The simplest regard 10 natural
ciVility should lead us to spare the
mother and provider our unpleasant
comments upon the food set before us;
and the mcrest recognition OF what
makes gathered family dear to each
other should guide us TO lend the aid
OF pleasant chat and kindly speech
while seated at dlnneriable.
1t would be hard to measure what
good could be accomplished by agree
ing not TO find fault with what was
provided until some other time, and u
sincere determination TO make our
meal times a source of pleasure 10 one
another. We gather flowers to make the
material board beautiful, and count 1t n
legitimate use OF our money 10 buy
more literally OF what adds grace and
nttracuveness TO our tabto than else
where In our houses; we prepare IN
vain II rude tautt-hnding spirit rules
our family and differing opinions take
opportunity to proions discussion and
increase irritation. One could hardly
find q better bond 10 hold together the
home circle; one could scarcely hope to
make the thought Of home dearer; there
could he - Cheerier memories OF fam
sly life than OF the pleasant hours spent
around the aforementioned table, IL
By any pressure OF persuasion or In
fluence Of affection we could prevail up
on our children TO use the same cour-
tegy at hoe that makes them delight
ful guests elsewhere and show the
gracious Difference TO father and mother
that they would surely give to any 9TH
or host or hostess, however slightly re-
gardcd.
II IN unquostiondbiy true that We are
30 anxious that our children should love
their homes that We sometimes nllOw
them to mnko them very dlsnErccablc
rn.. tuhnrnLn 10 lLNn md I'm Tho ON