The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1897-02-18
EXECRABLE LAW.

"Dish yer thing yer calls de law ain
got no sense in it, - screamed Tempe.
Nevertheless she loosened her grip on the
prisoners collar, and he, squirming from
underneath her heavy hand, fed for the
woods with the speed of an antelope
''The court is forthwith adjourned, sine
de- announced Colonel Ben, rising from
his seat on the back porch steps
The colonel had been called forth by q
perfect storm of vililcation that ragged
in the kitchen, which was built, In old
Virginia style, at considerable distance
from the mansion.
Checking his impulse to swear at the
cook and add fuel to the flames, smile
stole over his weather beaten features.
The other members of the family had
been drawn to the spot-Jerry, Thomas
and pretty Drusilla, who carried the keys
and spoke when she please
They found the earthquake and wind
storm in full blast. Tempe, the cook, was
framed in the doorway, brandishing a fry
ing pan in one hand, with the other insert
ed in the collar of a long Hnbed, sham bling
youth who was scuffi1ng desperately to get
loose.
On they came, a string of both sexes
hands from the field who had come in to
dinner and were too much interested to
think of food, all talking at once.
The excited group struggled up to the
foot of the steps, and there Colonel Ben
waved his hand.
"Silence ALL
'Now, Tempe, you may have first go
and state your grievance, and then the
prisoner, whom I recognize as Eugene,
can defend himself"
Eyes, sir. I aim guine tell no lie bout
it. I guine give you de facts what dis hyer
vilyun Ujeem's done done and Billy dar-
Billy my witness
Billy came to the front, and shifting his
weight upon the right leg, very proud Of
being placed in a position to be SO much
noticed, blinked like a frog in the sun
shine.
NDish yer Ujeems he done stolt my huss-
buns pistol, which he done buy way out
yonder in Happystraw, crost de seas in
New York, an pay his cash money for, an
moufharps aim good huff for Ujeems, an
he got to set hisseh up wild corJeen,
which he solt dat pistol my huSsbun done
yeaFn de cash money for SO he kin buy dat
corjeen, which Billy dar is my witness, an
de Lord in hebben know he cyarn play de
moufharp good as my little Sally Ann
kin howI' from Eugene who could
endure much, but not such insult as the
last.
"Don't interrupt, Eugene said the
colonel. 1--WE will listen to you presently"
f'I aim guine tell no lie bout it, - cried
Tempe, beginning again. Ny hu6sbun' s
pistol is stolt an solt for q corjeen, which
dat Ujeems cyarn' grind mare chune out
er, an Billy is my witness, so he'p me
Gordl Amt dat Sc, Billy?'
Billy blinked afnrmative1y and stood
but the fr1ner on his right leg.
can dish yer Ujeems' Tempe gave
the prisoner a shake which made his teeth
chatter se stols my hussbun's pistol an
solt it, an he took an shoot de African crow
often de top o my Sunday bonnet. Me,
guine long de road to meetin house an
thinkin bout muffin tall, and African
crow which my hussbun gint So out de sto'
in Happystraw crorst de seas, whar he
wuk in de brickyard to yearn de cash
money for to buy pistols, he SO kind an
good lennin dat vilyun de pistol, de reason
he so gen Gus an kind he amt got no
| house an land like ter folks is dis day.
Tempe was wound up like a clock and
kept ght on with her injuries:
can dish yer Ujeems face black as de
fryin pan call hisself high 1arnt an turn
up his rusty nose at my hussbun an say he
dun went thoo nine Gfuffey readers an a
whole endurin barrel of books he dun buy
at cotton dun read 'em all spang theo,
an half 'en was Bibles. Dat SO, Blly?''
Billy blinked his right eye.
'Now, he done stolt my hussbun's pis-
toll an shoot folks African crowso off de-all' g
bonnit which dat crow had red tail an yal-
Ter wings sorter sot up so.'' She placed
| her arms alziInbo. To do this she was
| obliged to loosen her grip on Eugene.
! Then was his time to escape, but though
present in body the fatuous youth was alb
sent in mind
Sc Ain dat so, Billy?'
Norm. One wing sot up mo- higher
dan de yuther wing said Billy.
There was a murnur among Tempe s
hackers at Billy's going back on her.
! 81 gwine set de law on him, prison
him, Jail himp' screamed the virago. DE
1aw-de 1aTl Prosecute him wild de Law
u LIZ L.
''That will do, Tempe. Now, Eugene,
what have you to say to rebuff these
charges?'' said the colonel.
81 ain nuver know muffin bout no pis-
| toll ain lay my eye on no pistol, - de-
clared Eugene. ST never know Gable had
pistol. I kin prove it by Billy dar.''
Billy shifted his weight to the other leg
and ga2ed in a ruminative manner at the
trio of buzzards floating high up in the
blue.
A loud groan of disparagement rose
from the listeners, and Eugene saw he had
| gone too far and made haste to weaken
his statement.
f'Fo' Cord an de angels, de old rotten
pistol was broke whenst Gable Iont it &c
me, an Billy dar know it, an whenst
turned it back to Gable de pistol was In
good order, an kin prove it by Billy dar. -
Billy stood now on the left leg and nod
ded affirmation.
An OaC a pine plank lie, bout L cydFn
| play moufharp good as her Sally Ann, ar
Billy dar he my witness. Sally Ann cyarn
play no mon muffin"
"I'n mash your mout' with dis fryir
pan, belittlin my Sally Ann,'' screamed
the enraged Tempe 81 gwine by de law
de law!''
s'Stop, Tempe said the colonel cru
gene admits that your husband lent him {
dangerous weapon, and he being under
age, the law of Virginia, in handling ths
crime of malicious assault upon privats
property, includes your husband as parti
ceps eriminis, and if Eugene goes to jai
Gabriel will go with him, Eugene being