San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1897-11-23
TIT FOR TAT.

The Restaurant Walter Played the
BARRIERS Old Game.
Pork and beans? Yes, sir. Anything
elseP"
NO"
The waiter in the Madison street res
taurant filled the order with alacrity.
"Did you say coffee, sill? ?" he asked. as
he placed the pork and beans before the
hungry guest.
mo-" replied the latter.
you'll find our coffee very nice, sir"
This bread and butter goes with the
pork and beans, doesn't it?'
"Yes, sir"
"And this glass of water?"
Certainly, sir"
"Well, that's all want"
"Yes, sir, Like to try cup of our
chocolate?"
"No. If I want anything else Til call
for it."
The waiter stepped back, but re-
turned presently to ask:
Wouldn't you like to have me bring
you some of our homeless Goldfish? It's
the best in the country"
mo"
"How about roast turkey with stuff
ing?"
Don't want any"
cts first class"
"That's all right. don't want it."
81 think you'd like our roast beef and
Drowned potatoes"
Didn't you hear me say that If l
wanted anything else would call for
it?"
eyes, sir"
The waiter stepped back again. but
in few moments returned to the at
tack.
Excuse me for saying so, my friend,
but you look as if you might need some
kind of game. Suppose you try our jack
snipe on toast?"
"Great Scott! Don't you reckon l
know what Iwant?"
Eyes, sir. Our jack-snipe is fresh and
good. Everybody needs to eat game
once in awhile. Kind O. tones up the
system"
"Pve told you don't want any"
Eyes, sir. Rabbits amt good this time
of year, or we'd have some rabbit.
Squads are about as good as wild game,
though. Like to try broiled SQUAD on
toast?"
I'D like to eat my pork and beans in
peace. Bring me some more water, will
your"
"Yes, sir. Shan't 1 bring you some
iced tea?"
Not any iced tea"
Its very fine"
"Don't want it,
"It's good for some people. Tones up
the system"
That's all right. Bring me that wa
ter, will your"
"Yes, sir"
| He went away and returned in an in
credibly short space of time.
Here's your water" he said, "but
think you'd find our iced coffee mighty
fine"
The guest made no reply.
Better let me bring you some iced
coffee, sir"
when want any iced coffee or any.
thing else I'll let you know"
ever try any of our stewed mush
rooms?"
mo, and 1 don't want to try any OF
your stewed mushrooms, either"
you needn't be afraid of them, sir
They're all right. We guarantee them
and there amt any better in the United
States"
81 don't"
Some people, you know, are afraid
of mushrooms. Ours are selected with
great care. The man we get our mush-
rooms from is an expert. He raises 'em
scientifically"
"Say, do you know you're confound.
ed nuisance"
81 hope not, sir. I'm only trying your
own way of doing business on you"
What do you meant"
"You run barber shop on State
street, don't you?"
"Yes. What of that?"
"You have the chair next to the front
door, think?"
Eyes"
| "Well, went to your shop last Sat
urday to get shave. You shaved me.
You tried to get me to have my hair cut.
You told me ought to have shampoo.
You said my hair needed smuggling. You
wanted to know if I hadn't better have
some tonic or bay rum. You wanted to
sell me special shaving mug and brush,
You bored me every minute you were
| shaving me, and said to myself that if