davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-02-26
MARIHUGH STILL PURSUES.
NOW CHARGES LEWIS AND ROB
INSoN WITH TRESPASS.
Martin Olson Starved His Horses
and is Fined For Cruelty-John
W. Openshaw Relates a Piteous
Tale of Decentralization Police
Matters.


Justice Wenger had quite busy day
yesterday A charge of trespass pre-
ferred by William Marihugh against
R. s. Lewis of the coal firm of Nor
ris & Lewis and Thomas Robinson, one
of the drivers in the employ OF the firm,
occupied several hours.
The facts appeared to be that Rob
inson had delivered a ton of coal at
Marihugh's house. Marihugh claimed
he paid Robinson for the coal on de-
livery, and Robinson denied abso-
lutely that he had received any money
from Marihugh.
Lewis and Robinson took a wagon,
went to Marihugh's coal shed and re-
moved 1900 pounds of the coal Mari
hugh a week ago laid a charge of petit
larceny against Robinson for steal
ing the coal. The case was heard be-
fore Justice Sommer and Robinson was
discharged, hands down. Then Mari
hugh brought the present charge of
trespass, and after the hearing his
honor fined Lewis and Robinson SO
each, but soon afterwards Robinson
was pardoned. Lewis paid his fine
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-02-26
BOND QUOTATIONS.

Chic. & Nor I. u y L. oS--.----l1teS
trust reefs 5S.. - o. 5. L. cons IS i5l4
d. of c. 3-6 5s..109 P & r. zs....... 81
d. & r. G. 1sts..1117s Preferred inc. a.
D. & r. G.. As. SS1. r. G. W. 1sts-.. %
Erie G.. l.. As--- 651s st. i. K 1. NJ.
Fit W. & d. c. gen. 5s.-.-...--- 70
lists ...........-. 5SIa st. l. & S. F.
C. H & S. A gen. 6s.---.-.-..111A
1st 6s............104 st. Paul CON-. .1S11s
G. H 81 S. A. st. P, c. & P
End 7s---.---.-.. SO lists ...-.-.-..--11I
G. Z. debs 5s.-.. 957s S. Car. 4l5s..---.105
II. & T. c. 5s..-.109 S. Ry. 5s..-.--.-. S9it
H & T. c. con. S. p of c. lists. .10715
6S ...-......--... 1O2S4 Tenn. new set IS 50
Iowa Cent. lists 90 Tex. Pac. 1sts-.. 30
X p. cons. 70 Tex. Pac 2nds.. 21is
K. P. LIST. Den L. P. lists OF 90. 1913
yer div.........1 1861 L. s. Is reg. of
Louis. con. As. 90 1925. -122l5
NJ. K & T. ends 59Ss L. S. As coup of
NJ. x. & T. As. S42s 1925 ...........-.1225s
Mobile & o. As. IS U. S. new As
Mutual L. 6s....110 coup. of 1907. .11l%
y. ]. c. gen. 5s--11615 L. S. 2s....--.---.113 !
n. Y c. & St L. S. 5s reg. SSi5
L. 4s............105 10. 5. IS coup. -.1135s
n & w gen IS 120
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

and slippery steps. Then came a strug-
gle that, after at last he had borne his
fiercely battling comrade up into the
night, left Murphy breathless and ex-
haustcd. and then came the rain of
blows that toppled him, crashing, into
the ruin of the hot-bed.
'She came upon me that sudden and
furious-like, sorr, l couldn't explain;
an it was tryin' to pacificate her was,
backin' off, an niver see the hot-bed be-
hind me for the hot batin' i was get
tin afront. An thin whin she had me
down on the fat of me back, an grasp
in at thin glass works, poor Riggs,
niver KNOWN what he was doin', sorr.
only to help me, grappled with the ould
lady for the purpose of expostulatin',
an thin that raygur wench run screech-
in into the house, an the young lady
came shriekin' to the windy, an the
stranger-the gentleman-lept to the
side door, an 1 a-callin' to him to come
an square me an Riggs. whom he got
into the scrape, an there was more
screamin', an, he niver so much as axed
to shpake, but run fur his life when the
lieutenant jumped in an batthered
Riggs, who was only askin' chance to
explain"
do you expect me to believe that any
gentleman stood there and saw Riggs
grapple that poor old lady and never
raised hand to stop it?' asked Lam
BERT almost angrily.
Its Gods thruth, sorr. He was
maxim motions, crazy-like. but he niver
came outside, that doorway until he
saw the lieutenant. an then the lamp
wint out. wild him a-runnin'."
. The lieutenant pondered moment.
Had Sergt. Burns ventured on an en-
preston of doubt, the interview would
have come to an end at once, with MUIR
ply in disgrace; but Burns looked full
of honest perplexity. and yet belief.
You ought to have had sense enough
to know should be glad to send to town
for anything Mrs. Walton needed" said
Lambert. "Why didn't Riggs ask per-
mission?-or why didn't you?"
Murphy was certainly frank. "Sure
we both knew il would be anybody but
Riggs the lieutenant would send. We
wers guilty enough of going to town
without permission, an drinkin'; but
IL was charity, not thayin'. sorr, that
we entered the garden for"
"You may send Murphy back, ser
geant. Wen have TO hold him until
Riggs can tell his story. OF course"
said Lambert, as the Irishman was
led away, ''if there's anything in this
story about the stranger, il helps their
case materially. There was certainly
something queer about the agitated
words Mrs. Walton used just before we
came away-words about their testi-
mony and preventing court-martial.
You heard, did you not?"
"fes. sir--a little, anyway"
Can you imagine who the man is.
or account for his strange behavior?"
II can't sir. II might have been one
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

There is an honest Swede employed as
gardener in the East End, and his deib.
crate speeches are source of much delight
to his employer. lie has been much an.
noyed by thievish birds, and few DAYS
ago suggested that va scarecrow would be a
good thing II took him some time To
make the employer understand what he
meant, but finally he realized it VAS a
dummy bird scarer, LAX in oil country"
The employer fell in with the idea and
told the Swede to rig up frame When
this was completed the latter was given a
bundle of cast-of clothing TO deck out his
dummy. lie looked askance at the gar.
ments as he put them on the sticks and
was evidently much impressed by their ex.
cellent condition. He glanced down at his
own clothes from time to time and seemed
TO be making silent comparison. Present
ly he put the scarecrow in the garden and
returned to his employer, who stood at
some little distance. He looked at the work
of art with his. head very much on one side,
and finally said;
Say mister"
well, Johny"
"Ay tank maybe IL was better change
clothes with scarecrow, OF else stand myself
in his place"
He couldn't bear to see the dummy wear.
ing better clothes than he, did.--C Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
: cct,ins !, R,rht.

They were riding on the rear seat of a
Collamar car, aud were strangers to each
other. One of them was short and stout;
the other was man OF medium size, TO
whom everything along the route seemed TO
be new.
As they were passing along near the car
barns the medium sized man looked up at
the fine residence upon the bluff and said:
do You know who lives in that large
house up there, with the big veranday''
That big brown house!' the other re
turned.
Yes"
"Nou mean the one with the porch run
ming clcar,around ty"
Yes; do YOU know who lives there?"
The third one from the end of the row.
That's IT,"
- mean the third from the westerly END
OF the row"
Yes that's the one mean"
That one with the green awnings"
Yes"
Lets see! Eh,med il know who live,
there"
The .medium-sized man said no n.ore, but
he looked as il he wanted to fght--Cleve
land Leader.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26


!. They were two loe,l golf players, both
to play q match in the dark. Each Johnnie
had cut hole In his pocket. and had ball
all ready to drop down in the leg Of mis- trou.
sers just in front of the other ball. OF they
drove, and ON they walked. and presently
one says TO the other:
II say, Jock, my mon, I'm thinking yo're
o'erwalking your ba'."
Ma, ma, says the second, ''mine was Z
fine, clean drive, but whaur's yours"
'fh, mon, mine was an awful clure.-
SO they went another 80 yards. Then tho
first SAYS:
Jock, mon. I'm TAX my davy we're past
yours the moo"
Then whaurs your ain?"
Eh, mine was an awful clure.'
Another 90 yards brought them to the
putting green.
green"
Maybe you'd hest see If it's in the hole
MY certes, why there it IL. And. eh,
put y . curious; but there's mine in the hole
beside it, Mon. it's awful curious"
Het's hasved, then"
,.Hets halved--one each--good play
They teed up for the next hole solemnlv.
Then they stood looking at each other a
moment before they drove off
Say, Jock, my mon, dye think it's any
use TO gang on playing ike this,''
I'm thinking i would just be halred
.iIet's my ain very thocht, Jock
weel,we moo ca il halved match and
gang home
I'm thinkin' 'twould save world Of
Y. Sun.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

it. Now "a gentleman" whom Riggs
knew well, had brought them help;
but he himself could not go to Tugaloo
because of certain past events with
which he was intimately connected, and
none of the Walton servants dared 90,
because of the tremendous stories in cir
culation concerning the events of the
day. The gentleman had come long
distance at big risk TO see the lady.
Riggs declared, and must get away that
night.
In this dilemma Riggs was called on
for help. His chivalric nature was
aroused-presumably; or possibly "the
tiger had tasted blood and needed more.
Riggs had got the gentleman's last
drink, and the money for more was now
in his hands. But the gentleman had
stipulated that a reliable man must go
with him to fetch the precious packet
in case Riggs got full;" and Murphy
was the man. "We got the box. sorr,
an Riggs his bottle of liquor. an come
back all right, an we stole in there as
we were bid, an raised the cellar door,
an carried down the box to the fut Of
thin slippery steps meself. for Riggs
was gettin' noisy-lilse. An thin we
stole away, niver disturbin' anybody,
sorr, only doin' the poor Teddy a kind
ness, as we were towld. We didn't see
or hear anybody. IL was afther 1t all
the throuble came"
There was pathos in Murphy's de-
scription of the ''throuble." Their task
accomplished, Murphy sought to get
Riggs to his tent, but the man had
drunk just enough to be rabid for more,
and in the struggle the bottle fell with
the gill or two remaining and was
smashed This was indeed catas-
trophe. Riggs had that fearful craze
for alcohol which is satiated only when
the victim 'apses into drunken stupor.
Murphy got him to the tent and to bed
and thought he had him safe, but awoke
later to find him gone-gone for more
liquor; but where? None was TO he
had in camp, unless he broke into the
captains medical stores, which, MUIR
ply argued, he wouldn't dare attempt
with the lieutenant lying there along
side. All of sudden it flashed over him
that his wretched 'bunky," after hav-
ing faithfully acquitted himself of his
trust before the fatal whisky-logging of
his moral sense, had now stolen off in
the darkness to rob the very household
for whose sake. or that of the bribing
liquor, he had braved punishment.
Riggs had gone back for that wine.
The Irish soldier had his faults, God
knows, but desertion of his fellow, even
in face of torture, is not one of them.
Murphy stole away, hoping II was not
too late to ,ecapture Riggs, and came
upon him, just as he feared, tugging at
something at the foot of those dark
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
SHE WANTED SNAKES
The Regulation Kind That Are Seen
In DeIirium Tremens.

"Do you keep snakesy" she asked, az she
peered through her glasses at the parrots
and Guinea pigs in the bird store
II have a Gila monster and some chame
Icons" said the bird nian
II don't think they would answer. You
see what want is regular snake, one Of
the long field kind that are not poisonous.
may as well tell you tha, my husband has
taken TO drinking and ] want the snake to
put in his boots
IF ] were you," said the man, "Id wait
and, II he keeps on drinking he'll see snakes
anyhow
'No, he won't, and he wouldn't care IL he
did If they weren't real. But II he sees a
live snake he'll quit, and I'm going to try it
on. Couldn't you get me sonle?"
Nesm, ! can till an order. II you call
around tomorrow you can get the snakes .
and the man took down the address Of his
customer.
Its a test case" he said, as the woman
went out, 'and ! feel sort Of curious to know
how II will turn out. My idea s that the
husband will be so mad when he finds the
snakes in his boots that he'll go out and get
drunk as billed owl, but maybe il will
work the other way--we'll hope il will"
Then he sent his boy out to hunt for
snakes in the hedges and bitches OF the prai.
rie.-Chicago Times Herald.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
irrational Conduct.

Walsh nearly loses his mind when
Als wife goes away"
How does he act?"
why, yesterday, before she was a
mile out of town, he went and bought
himself new straw hat, red necktie
and pair of yellow shoes."-Chicago
Record.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Those people next door lead sort
of hand-to-moutk existence, dom.
they?' said the president of the Help
ing Hand TO the Worthy Poor Sewing
and Mission society.
NO" responded the good dame ad-
dressed. They're awful poor, but |
guess they know enough to handle forks
properly. Detroit News.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

There's Pcrkins-yon know Perkinsi
entered into an agreement with hi,
wife soon after their marriage, 20 years
ago, that wherever either lost temper
or stormed the other was to keep 81
lence."
And the scheme worked?"
Admirably Perkins has kept 81.
leuce for l2 years."--N. Y. Truth.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Lady shopper lin mammoth depart
ment store, to lace counter saleslady)
Where shall find the ribbon depart
ment, please?
Saleslady tapologetically)-I don't
know where IL is, ma'am. You will have
to ask one of the floor pedestrians
Puck.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Yesterday said ,Jabson, IL refused a
poor woman's request for a small sum OF
money, and in consequence of my act !
passed sleepless night. The tones Of her
voice were ringing in my ears the whole
time
Your softness of heart does you credit,
said MADISON. who was the woman"
My wife. San Francisco Chronicle.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

of those three or four that Mr.. Parmelee
hauled in-one of the Potts crowd; but
the idea of his standing back and letting
the old lady have that tussle all to her
self That couldn't happen. sir, north
or south, unless" And Burns stopped
short.
Unless what?'
well, sir. unless there were reasons
he daren't let her know be was there"
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Cos Stick-I don't see you out riding
lately, old chap. You don't mean to
say you have got tired Of your wheel?
Henry Peck-No, not at all; but you
see my wife has taken my tires for the
baby to cut his teeth on.-Boston Trans
cript.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
Fortunate Girl.

Jinks-That was narrow escape that
Miss Highfiown had. wasn't it?
Binks--What was that?
Jinks-Why, when she got married
there was no one present TO give her
iway.-Town Topics.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
Girl. Are Artfu,.

James-Do you always write letter
in such large script as you are using
now? could not help noticing it.
Henry--No; but this is to girl. You
know they always size fellows re-
gard for them by the number of pages
he tills.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Sue-I jes' won bet from Sam an
he am gwine ter git me pair OBJ gloves
or box OF candy, whichebbah like.
Dinah-Yo' Jes' take de candy an yo'
won't hab ter tell him de size gloves yo'
weah-N. Y. World.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
No, Exactly a P".time.

Bellows--Does your daughter play on
the piano?
Old Farmer Tin tones of deep disgust)
NO. sir. She works on il, pounds on
IL, scrapes II. jumps on it, and rolls over
on ii. but there's no play about it, sir
Harlem Life.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

"The bicycle has almost run the horse
out of business, and now it has begun on
the cow"
"Eow's that?'
why, wasn't that rubber-tire beef
steak we had for breakfast ?"--Chicago
Record.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
Ann the Conxen,ence.

Tourist Tin coal mine, after passing
around cigurs) Everything seems to
be wet and damp. Where can l strike
match?
Miner-Roight here, sir. Dinnis lift
tn rubber cloth often tn powder keg!-
n. Y. Weekly.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
without Alloy.

Reuben say, Siias, be you a goin'
% Deacon Granger's golden wedding to-
tight?
Silas--Naw, i be'ant. I'm too alfred
rood a silver man to be u goin' to any
blamed old gold party.-lellow Kid
iagazine.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
Before the nnrxain sale.

New Salesman understand that no
purchaser is TO have more than ten
yards. But suppose a lady comes back
after one purchase shall refuse to sell
her any more?
Floor Walker-If you're tired of your
position.-Puck.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

"Men and women are not alike In
their commercial methods
mo: women always want to mix
friendship with business, and men al
ways want to mix business with friend
ship."-N. Y. Truth.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Employer-Go and tell that man who
just came in TO shut the door. ! hate
such carelessness!
Clerk-That wasn't carelessness on
bis part. sir; 1t was precaution. He's
a book canvasser.-Chicago Tribune.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
Lots of T,,cr,.

He.--what has become of that pretty
Miss BARCLAY who was visiting you last
summer?
she-She's joined the great majority.
He-You don't mean to say she is
dead.
she-Oh. mol She married man
named Smith.--Up-to-D
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
Friena.h,n and i.ox..

Clara (who owes her a grudge) )--Yes
there isn't any doubt in my. mind that
George Fowler is blindly in love with
you.
Winnie (blushing)-why2
Clara--He told me yesterday that he
didn't think you looked bit over 3o.--
Tit-Bits.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

why do you have plush chair on
your piazza in such hot weather. Miss
Julia?"
'"We have TO have it. We always offer
1T to men whom we don't care to have
stay all evening.-Chicago Record.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

BY the ring round Mable's finger
You may know he is her choice;
But a different opinions
In the ring of pa9a's voice.
-Puck
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
lie couIdn't Help Il.

Farmers Wife--Why do you wear
such ragged clothes?
Tattered Tramp-Because me dress
suit is gittin' pressed. ma'am.-N. Y.
journal.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Old Moneybags-Marry me. Icannot
live without you!
Miss Uptosnuff-That's just the rub.
I'd snarry you in a minute if you
couldn't live with me!--Town Topics.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
A She skeptic.

He-My dear, feel awfully baS. l
believe am going to die.
She-I guess not. You men are such
ers.-Indianapolis journal.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

she-Did you say you found light
hair in the biscuits, dearY
He--Yes, love; the only light thing
i found about them.-Yonkers States
mau
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

''Invalids are difficult to deal with"
I'm what way?"
IF you ask them how they are they
get mad. and If you don't ask them how
they are they get mad."-Chicago Rec
Jrd.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

she-what beautiful name you
have. Mr.. Montrose.
He--You like il. my lady. Take ill.,
Detroit Free Press.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
rhe Crorning Snare.

Defend me-" is my daily prayer.
From pltfall and from whirl,
\ nd keep NE from that crowning snare
They call the summer girl!'
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Fits stopped free and permanently cured.
No fits after first days use Of Dr. Klines
Great Nerve Restorcr. Free 80 trial bottle 4
treatise. DR. Kline. 933 Arch st., Phila., Pa.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

l cannot speak too highly Of Piso's Cure
for Consumption. Mrs. Frank Mobbs, 2l5
w. 22d St, New York, Oct. 20. 1894.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Mrs Peck-I see suicide is rapidly increas-
ing among the men.
Henry Peck--And ! see that marriage ia
steadily increasing. = Philadelphia North
American.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

so Boracks is going to marry that aged
Mum girl, is hey"
Yes, and the funny part Of II il that
he told her he wanted to marry her on ac-
count Of her fortune"
"Eh:"
He told her that she was too young and
foolish to have the cnre OF so much money!
indianapolis Journal.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
The place for Her.

Miss Uptodate tdisconsolately)-I
ion't seem to make a success of any
hing.
Mr.. Hardheadde-Why don't you get
job at soda fountain? The more of
tizzle you make. the better.-Town
topics.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

Business Man Ito clerk whom he has
eaught kissing his typewriter)-D
pay you to kiss my typewriter, sir?
Clerk-You don't have to-I'm will
ing to do it for nothing.--N. Y. Journal.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
Hall's Catarrh Cure
Is a Constitutional Cure. Price 75c.


Why He Didn't Know Il.
Barber You say you have shaved here
before! don't remember your face.
Customer-Pr Probably not. 1t has healed
up since.-N. Y. World
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26

No girl, according to the women, il as
pretty as she used TO be.--Atchison Globe
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
EXPERIENCE.

Edythe-Last night when 1 accepted
Jack thought he would never stop
kissing me.
Alice-Yes. That is the way he al
ways does.-N. Y. Herald.
The Beaver herald. [volume] (Beaver, O.T. [Okla.]) 1895-1923, 1897-08-26
How GambIing Paws.
ders-What did II cost you?

Gummey-I won $25 in poker game
asst night.
Glanders-What did it cost you?
Gummey-Let's see. Drinks, $40. and
$40 for new dress for my wife, after
she found it out.-Louisville Courier
Journal.
The Brunswick times. [volume] (Brunswick, Ga.) 188?-1900, 1897-12-31
A REALLY GOOD JOKE.

Whoever 1t was that formulated the
grounds of contest of the recent mum
Opal election, a synopsis of which was
published exclusively in yesterdays
TIMES, he is certainly entitled to rank
as the boss humOrIst of Glynn county
Whether it was the product of one H.
divIdual, or, as was more likely the
case, Of a combination of brains, the
same Characterization will hold good.
Mark Twain, in his most ludicrous
efforts, Jules Verne, in his triumphs
of mprobabillty, meyer did anything
better. For JOINT union of assump-
ton and righteousness, this contest
notice 10 a prize-winner.
The registration list Of the last cleo
ton was fairly representative of the
intelligence of Brunswick. The Good
Government people charge that 532
of the 1880 on this list were illegal
voters. This statement amounts, yir-
tually, to an allegation that nearly one
half of the respectable citizens of this
city are guilty of moral and lega!
transRressIon, and are not to be trus-
ted with the exercise of the right of
suffrage. There's superlative "galP
for you!
The people WHO really and honestly
believe this to be the case could be
counted on the fingers of two hands
1t is . piece of harmless absurdity
and charge so utterly incapa BILE OF
proof, that it is hardly worth while tc
give 1t consideration.