davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
THIS MAN EATS IN LATIN.
Western Lawyer Is Responsible for the
1nciptent paresis of q Walter.

Western Lawyer Is Responsible for the
1ncipient Paresls of a Walter.
A western lawyer went int the
Planters cafe a few days ago. says the
St. Louis Republic. He had not al
ways lived in the far west, and in his
college days in the east was we'll
enough acquainted with the French
bills of fare of swell New York restaur-
ants. But out in his new home he han
forgotten about soup at pot gras n
pomme de terre a la duchesse. The fact
that he could not read some Of the del
icacies on the menu exasperated him,
and he proceeded to have fun with the
waiter.
Nothing here that I'd care for" said
he to the claw-hammered attendant.
eve can serve you anything for dim
ner, sir" said the waiter, confident that
he could please his customer before he
got through with him.
Have you any sine qua non7"
The waiter stared.
"No-o-0; sir" he answered.
What about bon mots? Have you
any,"
mo, sir"
"Then let me have some nice ignis-
fatuus. That's good all this time Of
the year"
"We haven't got any,"
Bring me some tempus fugit. then!"
That's out, too, sir"
You must have E pluribus unum!"
This time the waiter looked bright.
1--WE heard them speak about 1t in the
kitchen. I'll go and see!"
He came back empty handed and de-
jected. 1--WE haven't got It," he STAN
mered.
Strange that I can't get any Of these
seasonable things. Try once more,
and find out if they haven't pro bono
publico."
"Ill call Mr.. Weaver" said the wait
er, almost crazy by this time. per
haps he can tell what you want"
The guest from the west caught him
by the coat tails.
"All right" said he, land in the
meantime bring me some roast beef
and fried potatoes"
I'VE have it," yelled the waiter in
his delight at hearing of something
that was obtainable. and he flew off tt
the kitchen and came back with thu
beef and the potatoes and Landlord
Weaver in the wake.
The attorney and the hotel man hat
a good laugh at the expense of the I'm
fortunate waiter, who confided to thu
chef in the kitchen that he struck
man who must have been eating a
Delmonico's all his life.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
A LITTLE BRIEF AUTHORITY.
Ike Was Appointed Deputy Sheriff With.
out DELAY.

Ike Was Appointed Deputy Sheriff With.
out Delay,
Few men can look back over their
lives without wondering how they sur
vived the tight places through which
they passed. have probably been
through more dangers than the aver
age man." and the mar who made his
pile in Arizona, coming back to De-
troit that he might enjoy it, seemed
to be making a selection from his many
thrilling experiences, says the Detroit
Free Press. "They made me sheriff
down there, and I had one gang to
deal with that had no trouble in keep
ing me worried all the time. They
were the very worst type of border
ruffians and thought no more of hui
man life than I did Of wiping out a
coy ote. One evening l had been scout
ing on my own responsibility, a tip
having been given me that a little set
Element in the lower part of the coun-
ty was to be raided. Without the
slightest warning l came upon three of
the gang and had my hands extended
skyward in a jiffy. 1t was the boast of
the gang that they would put me out
of the way, and it looked black. But
a man thinks fast when his time
seems short. Ike l shouted. as if
commanding a regiment, I appoint you
a deputy sheriff. Well wipe off the
slate for you and you can hold the job
as long as want to. Nail that fellow
next to YOU A little brief authority
just caught the fellow. He took the
drop on his nan The diversion gave
me a chance at the other fellow and il
was a regular triumphal procession we
made to the county Jail. Ike made as
good an officer as ever operated in thai
rough country and inside of three
months we had the gang cleaned out.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
"oLD HlcKoRY.s" ,NAuouRAL7

A Mob Followed Him from the Capitol
and Invaded the White House.
Mr.. Bishop says of President Jack
sons Inauguration in the Century:
An eye witness who took a somewhat
jocose view of the days events wrote
mat the most remarkable feature about
jackson as he marched down the aisle
OF the senate with a quick, large step.
as though he proposed to storm the
capitol, was his double pair of spec
tacles. He habitually wore two pairs,
n for reading and the other for see
ing at a distance, the pair not in use
being placed across the top Of his head.
On this occasion, says the eye witness,
the pair on his head reflected the light,
and some OF the rural admirers OF the
old hero were firmly persuaded that
they were two plates Of metal let into
his head to close up holes made by
British bullets. When he appeared ON
tho portico we are told that the shout
which arose rent the air and seemed 10
shake the very ground. The cere-
mony ended. the general mounted his
horse to proceed to the white house,
and the whole crowd followed him.
1.-THE president" says a contempor-
airy writer; was literally pursued by a
motley concourse of people, riding,
running heller SHELTER, striving who
should first gain admittance into the
executive mansion, where 1t was un-
derstood that refreshments were to be
distributed"
An abundance of refreshments had
been provided, including many barrels
of orange punch. AS the walters
opened the doors to bring out the
punch in pals the crowd rushed upor
them, upsetting the pals and breaklne
the glasses. Inside the house thu
crush was so great that distribution o.
refreshments was impossible, and tub
of orange punch were set out in thu
grounds to entice people from tn,
rooms. Jackson himself was q
pressed against the wall of the recep
ton room that he was in danger of in
jury and was protected by a number o
men linking arms and forming 4 bar
rier against the crowd. Men with boot
heavy with mud stood on the satin GOV
cred chairs and sofas in their eagerney
to get a view of the hero. Judge Stor.
wrote that the crowd contained al
sorts of people, from the highest an
most polished down to the most vulga
and gross in the nation. II never say
such a mixture" he added. "The reigl
of King Mob seemed triumphant.
: was glad to escape from the scene a
soon as possible"
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
LATE SERMONS.

Jingoes.-We are all jingoes in this
country, all but a few female men,
and as a preacher, a citizen and a man,
l take my stand alongside of the jim
goes Of this country.-Rev. Thomas
Dixon, Evangelist, New York City.
Authority.-The state exists for the
good Of the individual, the family or
the institution, but it is the creature
of the people, to which they owe ODE
dience simply because it is the high
err power.-Father Henry Brann, Cath
Ollie, New York City.
Cuba.-Cuba has as much reason for
rebelling as we had a hundred years
ago. Have not the unhappy Cubans
as much reason to expect us to go 100
miles to help them as we had to expect
Lafayette to come 5000 miles to help
us?.-Rev. J. o. Wilson, Methodist, New
York City.
Readjustment.-Life needs to be ad-
justed to the old eternal rhythm of
the universe. We need to be quiet, Sc
rene, expectant, and look at the divine
side of life-the healthful side.-and so
come into sympathetic vibrations with
the harmonies of nature.-Rev. A. ].
Wells, Unitarian, San Francisco, Cal.
Happiness.-Too much time is taken
up in contemplation Of the species of
others enjoyment. If this time was
taken up in developing the means of
enjoyment within the reach of all there
would be more happiness and content
ment in the world.-Rev. Charles H.
Parkhurst, Presbyterian, New York
City.
The Testaments.-The Old Testament
was only an introduction to the New,
and its noblest characters were dupli-
Gated and accentuated in the New.
Jonah preaching penance at Ninevah
yields to the Baptist on the Jordan,
Isaiah to Paul. David to the Virgin,
John.-Rev. J.. ]. Gilday, Catholic, Wo-
burn, Mass.
SUCCESSFUL men of attachments and
of disciplined power are self-made mon
and, while parents, books. teachers, ex-
amples and experience had much to
do toward shaping the young life, yet
the chief things were personal power,
application, devotion and enthusiasm
to bring success.-Rev. DR.. Rylance,
E~piscopalian. New York City.
The Ideal Man.-One might say that
Job typifes the ideal of patience. Nc
greater example Of submission to di-
vine authority. faith in the benevolenct
of God and heroic patience in darkness
and af1iction ever has been found in
history. And. therefore, I say Job i;
my ideal man.-William J.. Cozzens
Salvation Army. Boston. MasA
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The gospel Of self-kelp was enlarged
10y a new chapter when Booker 7.
Washington recently addressed an ALL
dience of his own race. There isn't
much that we get in this country
without working for it," he said. 81
remember a story of an old negro who
wanted a Christmas dinner, and pray
ed night after night: Lord, please
send a turkey to this darkey.' But
none came to him. Finally he pray
cd. o Lord!2 please send this darkey
to a turkey And he got one that
same night"
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The Cuban League of the United
States has undertaken to raise funds
in aid Of that cause. The proceeds OF
the voluntary donations and sale Of
bonds are to be turned over to Ben
5amin ]. Guerra, treasurer of the Cuban
junta. The bonds offered for sale are
In denominations of $1,000, $500. 500
and $50 and bear interest at the rate of
6 per cent. The league expects to raise
$1,000, 900 throughout the United States.
Among the first to support the leagues
movement by purchasing Cuban bonds
are Colonel John Jacob Astor, $1,000;
Colonel Ethan Allen, $1,000; DR.. Will
lam Seward Webb, $500; N. F. Girls
void, $500; c. r. Sutherland $3.50; Ed
ward Mckinley, $3.50, and others TO
smaller amounts.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The way has been pointed out for
the admission of the graphophone as
a witness in the law courts. A prop
erty-owner in New York sued a rail-
way company for damages alleged to
have been caused by the noise result
ing from railroad operations neal his
property, and his counsel sought to
have a %graphophone reproduction of
certain Of these noises accepted as
evidence. The opposing counsel OBJ
jected on the ground that it has not
been proved that the recorded noises
were produced originally by the de-
PENDANT company's operations. The
judge sustained the objection, but said
that he would have admitted the tes-
timony Of the graphophone If the
proper way for it's admission had been
opened.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
LATE FASHION NOTES.

A popular ribbon for summer gowns
is a moire antique ribbon with satin
backs in the widths known as so and
"a.
Pinkish violet s%unshades are going
to be very popular, as they cast a most
becoming tint on the owners complex
ion.
Louisine is without doubt the fore
most summer silk. 1t trims up beau
tlfully with mousseline, MORE ribbon,
and Valenciennes lace.
Pave, CT pavement gray, is the very
newest of the new tints of this popu-
lar color. 1t is not as becoming as it is
fashionable, for there is neither a hint
of rose. cream, nor fawn in the shade.
The craze for violet, mauve and all
the shades Of purple has extended to
the corsets and yards of violet silk
and satin, either plain or Powered, are
made up in this important article of
dress.
Broad effects across the shoulders
and a small waist are the two things
considered very desirable in a gown
but the prevailing style this season
seems to be a slightly pinched front
cut like a pinafore to show an under
bodice of lace or chiffon.
Notwithstanding the expense of the
materials and trimmings in vogue, the
| clever woman of moderate means land
she is always with us) can. by the aid
of a few smart, detachable accessories
and the use If a few nobby blouses and
shirt waists, look as cool and attrac-
tive throughout the summer as she Of
wider resources, and. perhaps. less
taste.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The Rev. Frank Crane of Chicago
says: "A minister Is asked many
times a week what In unemployed man
is to do in Chicago. Thousands are
out OF work. The afternoon newspa-
per offices are besieged by crowds of
men eager to get hold of the want d-
vertisements, to see where they can
get something to do. I have been
asked to give some word of practical
advice to a man seeking work in the
great city. The best word 1 can think
of is this: Get on the ears and ride as
far as your money will carry you; then
get off and walk as far as you can, al
ways headed straight away from Chi
cago." Doubtless many Of those unem-
ployed Chicago people would take the
Rev. Cranes advice were they moi
aware of the fact that hoboing, while
in one sense having much room, is still
a crowded profession.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
EuuaI to the Occasion.

A teacher once sent one of her schoI-
ars, who was a half-witted boy, to her
home with a bottle.
When the boy arrived back at school
the teacher said to him:
"Well, George, did you take the bot
tie to our house."
George (after observation-disclosures,
teacher, I let the bottle fall and it
broke in pieces.
Thinking the teacher was going to
sGold him, he added, quickly:
"But I took the cork to your moth
er."-Spare Moments.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

Our little Duchess of Marlborough
has been a guest of the queen. Good.
The dispatches from London say:
Eighteen months ago Consuelo Van
derbilt was a plain American girl
Not SO! She was plain" Con-
suelo was distinguee at the age of 10
and, as Miss Vanderbilt, was regarded
as a queenly young woman. And why
should she not dine with the queen
Where Is the wonder?
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
"A Bundle of Nerves."

This term is often applied to people
whose nerves are a~bnormally sensitive.
They should strengthen them with Hos
letters Stomach Bitters. After a course
of hat benign tonic, they will cease to
be conscious that they have nervous sys-
TENS, except through agreeable sensa-
tons. 1t will enable them to eat, sleep
and digest well, the three media for in
creasing tone and vigor in the nerves,
in common with the rest of the system.
The mental worry begotten by nervous
dyspepsia will also disappear.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
MRS. ANNIE
She Ia a Noble and Impressive Per-

She Ia a Noble and Impressive Per-
sonality.
This peculiarly gifted oma Is in
her 50th year. Her hair is now rather
silverv than dark; and what may be
called tine spiritual expression of her
face has become intensified to a de-
gree s%trikingly suggestive of a life in
which contemplation predominates
over action, says Leslie's Weekly. The
old-time responsiveness Of speech, far
from having waned, Is in more subtle
force than ever. The limpid clearness
Of thought and scientific precision of
phrase, combined with sympathetic
spontaneity, which count for so much
in the charm of her DISGUISE, are es-
pecially in evidence now that the ma
terial side of ocultism, SO to speak.
is the subject of popular exposition.
Order, system and self-control are the
m~ainsprings Of ker power over others.
From her precept and example pro-
ceeds an impression of the serene force
of the inevitable. Most portraits of
Mrs. Besant fail to suggest either the
meditative grace of her features in re-
pose or the winning animation of her
smile. Her dress is p:cturesquely sim
pie, consisting of soft white silk, with
the c%huddar, or shawl, thrown over one
shoulder, after the fashion of the In
dian woman. On the third finger Of
the left hand she wears the famous sig
net ring of Nine. Blavatsky-an ORR
entail onyx, engraved with the SYM
bolical device of the double triangle
and the Sanskrit word Sat, si~gnifying
the divine existence. Altogether the
English teacher presents a noble and
impressive personality, with some
thing of the outward semblance of what
might look for in a living cham
pion of the ideal amid a sensual and
material age.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

New Resident-Who's that making
a motion to repeal the ordinance re-
quiring bicycle lamps? Old Member
That's Beriam, the coroner. New Resi-
dent-And who's that bowling so for a
pure water supply? Old Member-Oh,
that's Smith, the milkman.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

Franklin used a kite to find the key
to one of natures mysteries, and we
now see the weather bureau resorting
to kites to reveal the mysteries of the
upper air, that we may have more ac-
curate weather predictions. The kite
is entitled to a high rating as an in
strument of human progress.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

Nobody will be surprised at the
charge that a Brooklyn pastor hyp-
notices members Of his congregation.
My pastors have long been accus-
toned to putting some of their audi
tors into a deep sleep.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

In ~depopulating Cuba Gen. Weyler
finds yellow fever and smallpox much
more convenient agencies than pow
der and lead. Concentration in the
towns will be more deadly than all
his battles, SO many of which are said
to have beei fought on the type
writer.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
Never Full.

Yes, sir" said the sallow man,
proudly, II can truthfully say 1 was
never intoxicated in my life"
well, suh," remarked Col. Kahn
tuck, after a pause, that strikes me as
a very empty honor."-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The anti-high hat law has reached
the Pacific coast. Doubtless in a few
years no feminine hats will be worn
in places of amusement. If woman
could but realize the truth that her
own beauty exceeds that of any art of
the milliner, no ordinance would be
necessary to enable any one to see a
play.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
She Scorned the Idea.

"See her. said he, Il want it settled
right now who is to be the man of the
house from now on!'
You are, of course said she. DO
you suppose l wish to be anything so
insignificant, vacillating and contempt
ible as a manY'-Typographical Jour
nal.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

Shelf was just three years ago to-
night that you proposed. He-Now,
what did you want to bring that up
for on the only night Of the week that
/ have away from business? Indian
apolis Journal.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
A Memorable Occasion,

From the Chicago Tribune: At the
command Of the teacher Johnny wrote
on the blackboard: Tuesday, May 4, A.
D. 1897. What does A. D. mean, John
ny?" she asked. "It means Arson day,
ma'am," replied Johnny, without a
moments hesitation.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The title of the governor of Rhode
Island is Governor, Captain-Genera
and Commander-in-Chie of the State
Of Rhode Island and Providence Plan
t~ations." So large a tile in so small
q state is rather crowding things.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The TOfnbs, New YOrk's famous pris-
IN, is being torn down to make was for
a bigger me As a prison, it has out
lived its usefulness. and was c.owded'
unhealthy and inadequate; but as II
specimen of Egyptian architecture it
was as good as new; and is so decided
a loss to the city that it seems a pity
that the outside Of it cannot be moved
away and set up somewhere else
Harper's Weekly. |
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

tn. discovery in St. Louis that a
mf7- fed corpse perspires may be
usefH&Nto the old-fashioned believers
who stiff hold to the opinion that judg-
ment after death m in the form
of heat.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
Mare

the cheek of sorrow.'
That's all right; but it takes all my
time to raise a smile on the check of
my bookkeeper."
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The development of q school from small beginnings
into a great educational institution, is directly trace
able TO a careful selection of the best ability and
minute attention to the details of administration. No
institution IL SO favorably known in this respect as the
NEW ENGLAND CONSERVATORY OF Music in BOSTON,
with nearly Q million dollars invested in its magnih-
cent buildings, and with courses in music and clocu-
ton and practical instruction in piano aud organ
tuning, the advantages offered are unparalleled, and
prove beyond question that the student can make no
mistake who selects this school IN pref ,rence to any
other, at home or abroad.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
Information Withheld.

Kerrigan-Phat's good fer a cowld:
Casey-Hov yez got tn proice Nv two
hot whiskys about yez? Kerrigan-Oi
how not. Casey-Will, thin, K~errigan,
ut wud be be a mercy not t. tell yea
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

Toller-l don't believe that Meglin
gets his money honestly; I'd like to
know what he does for a living. Will
'et-Perhaps there wouldn't be steal
'ngs enough for more than one.-Ex.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

Pawtucket, R. l., clergyman recently
performed a marriage ceremony on the
opera house stage, and, becoming fus-
tered, asked the bride if she was willing
to take the groom TO be her lawfully
welded wife.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

ONDON possesses
a Jack the Rip
per- of whom it is
proud. This man is
Mr.. Howard Denver
of We y m o u t h
street, member Of
the prominent Lon
don clubs and of an
excellent family.
He is wealthy, be-
longs to the leisure
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
Irreco ciIabIe Difference.

Alice-Why did she refuse him-be-
cause they were of different faiths?
Clara-Yes. Alice-And he refused to
change his religion? Clara-Oh, no;
his wheel.-Judge.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

There is not a man who ever loaned
an umbrella but will reoice at the fact
that a man in Wilmington. Del, who
stole an umbrella received five lashes and
was sentenced to Imprisonment for three
months.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
What Is.A s.nt

Bill-Just back from Washington?
aill-Yes. Did you get the Presidents
carp" mo; but | got a piece of his
nind."-Yonkers Statesman.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

The Chicago board of education has de-
cided to equip twenty school buildings
with apparatus for boiling drinking water,
and to furnish all other buildings with
''germproof" filters.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

1t was Bias of Priene, a Greek poet,
who was the author of these two popular
phrases: Handsome is who handsome
does" and "A guilty conscience is the
worst accuser.'
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
Don't Tobacco Spit and Smoke Your Life AVA,

To quit tobacco easily and forever, be mag
netic, full of life, nerve and vigor, take No-To-
Bac, the wonder-worker that makes weak men
strong. All druggists. SOC or 81. Cure guaran-
teed. Booklet and sample free. Address Ster-
ling Remedy Co., Chicago or New York,
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26

FITS PermanentlyCure No fits or nervousness after
frst days use of DR.. Kline's Great Nerve Restorer.
Send for FREE S2.OO trial bottle ard treatise.
DIR. X. H.. KLINE, Ltd, 93l Arch St. Philadelphia, Pa.
The Dupuyer acantha. [volume] (Dupuyer, Mont.) 1894-1904, 1897-08-26
A. Ouestio of Color.

She-What is the fashionable color
for young ladies'? He-I prefer white
ones