The San Francisco call., 1897-10-03
4 STUDY OF JHE FUNERAL FIEND."

"What's tha ?'' l asked after l had
looked at he woman mentioned and saw
| nothing particularly unusual in her ap-
pearance.
"She is woman who attends funerals
simply for the iun she can get out OF such
a queer pastime, replied the undertaken.
"Oh, We have lots OF them" he went on.
Il meet them all the time in my business,
and the nerve some of them have is simply
marvellous"
My in ormant then went on to explain
that there are aboul fifty women in San
Francisco who have an unsuitable desire
20 attend funerals, regardless OF how
obnoxious ;hey make themselves to the
relatives of e. e deceased These brazen
creatures will boldly enter any house that
has Grape on the door, even though the
inmates are absolute strangers. Once in
side they make it business to get as near
the corpse as possible. Then they viii
exhibit all outward signs of grief as
though the dead person had been dear
friend. 1t is seldom that any CT the real
mourners ever say anything to these
women. In fact, in most cases they pass
for friends OF the deceased. Not only will
these women visit the place where the de-
ceased is laid out. but they will boldly
get into a carriage and follow the body to
the grave.
Just wait awhile" said the under
taker. land there will be more of the
friends around. That man who is laid
out in the parlor there is stranger in San
francisco; that is he has not more than
dozen friends here and died in small
town about fifty miles away. He is 10 be
buried in about an hour, and his few real
friends will all be here, and so will the
others. Look there now. l really ought
to kick her out
l glanced into the parlor and saw stand
ing beside the coffin well-dressed woman
of uncertain age. For moment she rested
one hand on the lid and gazed long and
steadily at the face of the dead. Then
she put her handkerchief to her eyes and
burst into tears. Sob after sob shook her
form and she gave all outward indications
OF the deepest grief.
"Poor woman" 1 said.
"Poor humb bug" said the undertaken.
"She never saw that man alive. Why
should she weep over hiIn now that he is
dead ?'
"But are you sure she Is not some rela-
tive?" asked.
sure" replied the undertaken; "of
course l am sure. Why, I've seen her do
that very thing at nearly every funeral l
had here in the last six months. As soon
as body is laid out she comes in, and
she generally goes to the grave with the
mourners. l have also seen her act the
same way in private houses. 1 don't
know why she should act that way, but 1
think she must be crazy"
As the undertaken had asked me to wait,
1 determined to do SO and also to follow
the woman to the grave ana afterward ask
her why she had the strange desire to at
tend funerals.
There were nine friends of the deceased
at the funeral and the undertaken pointed
out three women that were what he called
'fiends, making twelve persons in all.
BY questioning these women after see-
ing their actions 1 concluded that they
are possessed of some sort of mania. Just
what it is remains for some medical man
to find out.
The actions of two of these women were
not particularly conspicuous. but the
third, the one who wept beside the coffin,
behaved so as 10 attract the attention of
one OF the mourners, who, taking pity on
her, rushed out to get her drink of
brandy.
DID you know Mr.. -" be whispered
to her when she had quieted down.
YES" she half gasped. II knew him
long ago. He was good man and good
friend"
After the simple service had been read
the coffin was put into the hearse and the
mourners got into the carriages. 1t so
happened that the nine real mourners got
into two carriages leaving the three false
mourners standing on the sidewalk.
The man who had obtained the brandy
for the woman VINO seemed so deeply
affected noticed this. He held a whis-
! pered conversation with the undertaken,
the result being that another carriage was
called, into which the three women got
and seated themselves comfortably.
| took streetcar and reached the ceme-
terry almost as soon as the carriages.
The services here were very simple, a
friend reading a passage from the Scrip
lures and making few remarks in regard
| TO the career of the deceased.
Up to this time the three women had be-
naved in perfectly modest manner, but
as soon as the coffin was lowered into the
grave the hystericaI one commenced.
"He's gone" she almost shouted.
Hush" some one whispered.
| But her handkerchief came out and the
sobbing began.
When the clods dropped on the coffin
/ lid she lost all control OF herself and fairly
| shrieked
We'll never see him again; we'll never
| see him again. Oh, it's an awful day."
Brandy was brought out and couple OF
| mourners supported the sobbing and
trem bling woman while she took long
drink. They then conducted her to seat
and the ceremony was finished.
Strange as it may seem the three false
mourners showed no inclination to asso.
citation with one another, but kept far
apart. as if in fear of contagion.
| While the service was going on I had
held a conversation with the undertake.,
and he agreed to keep the women's car
HOW AMERICAN