The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1897-01-13
all Sorts Of Paragraphs.

| IF we frame ourselves another
form than God prescribes, We worship
not him but ourselves.
= Arkansas has a town named
Credit, Iowa one named What Cheer,
and Florida one called Hurrah.
= Daniel Campbell and his wife, OF
Walton, County, Fla, arc raid to be
respectively III and l12 years old.
"Pop, what is promptness?"
"Promptness Well, it is bad habit
of always being on time and getting.
tired to death waiting for people who
are not.
= An electric ship with fourteen
propellors has been built and will soon
be tested. A speed of forty-fve miles
an hour is expected. That's a grey
hound for you.
= Hard coal retails in South Dako-
ia at $40 to S11 per ton. Two tons Of
corn will furnish as much heat as one
ton of coal. AS corn is much the
cheapest it will be used for fuel this
winter.
-"Our agreement was that you were
to have half if we won the suit, de-
clares the client. ''Exactly, t" re-.
sponded the lawyer, "but you got only
half Of what you sued for, and that is
just mys half"
= ''May I kiss you, Miss Jane 2's
II am sorry to see, Mr.. Briggs, that
you, too, are affected by the prevailing
cause Of business depression . "And
that is 2" LACK Of confidence D.
Then he kissed her.
81 said the large, fat person.,
with the large, fat diamonds, II am
self-made man. The angular gentle
man with the soured air looked at him
curiously. 'Must have been your
first job, eh ?" he said
= "There are three dead flies in the
SOUP" said stranger to the waiter in !
Dallas restaurant. eur de Lawds
sakes After flies has billed in de soup
for ha'f an hour, yer don't specs 'em
ter be- erlive yit, does yer ?"-Teras
Svtings.
| The Dutch have delightfully."-
original way Of collecting their. taxes.
If, after due notice has been given,
the money is not sent, the authorities
place one or two hungry militiamen in
the house to be lodged there until the
amount Of the tax is paid.
| The FIVE longest rivers in. the
world are the Missouri ri-Mississippi,
4,230 miles; Nile with the Nyanza
head stream, 4,200 miles; Amazon,
with the Apurimac, $500 miles
Irtish-O Oh, 3,410 miles; Sslenga-s
Angara- Yenisei, $500 miles.
Such help as we can give each
other in this world is a debt to each
other; aud the man who perceives a
superiority or capacity in a subordi-
nate, and neither confesses nor assists
it, is not merely the withholder of
kindness, but the committer of injury.
"Will you run for office again ?''
asked the politicians acquaintance.
'My friend" was the earnest and de-
liberate reply, II wasn't running for
Office" "Why-er-everybody thought
you were." II thought so, too. But
I have discovered that I took the
wrong route"
= The inhabitants of the Andaman
Islands are said to be the smallest Y
race Of people in the world. The
average height of full-grown Anda-
man is less than four feet, and the
anthropological experts who recently
visited them found but few that
weighed over Is pounds.
"A primary teacher in a Watervliet
Sunday School took for subject. The
Lord loveth cheerful giver." She
inquired if anyone knew what it meant,
when little 4-year-old boy said
'sMiss l., I know what that means"
"Well, George Edwin, what is il p
''It means to give whole lot and
don't cry over it. y
A farmer in Columbus county,
N. c., last year realized Sl01 from
four-acre patch in SNAP beans he
followed the beans with corn that
shucked out lSO bushels; this was
augmented by twelve tons Of pea vines.
These four acres turned him out $371,
or an average of $92.75 per acre, and
his land is not impoverished.
-"I suppose" said lawyer to
Dakota justice, s'that you reserve J
your decision until tomorrow, so as to
look up some OF the doubtful points
in the case p Not much" replied
the justice II make up my mind
bout this ere case as soon ash heard
who the defendent was-I want the
time to fgger out the bill Of costs. ~
For a pain in the chest piece Of
flannel dampened with Chsmberlain's
Pain Balm and bound on over the seat
of the pain, and another On the back
between the shoulders, will afford
prompt relief. This is especially
valuable in cases where the pain is
caused by cold and there is a tendency
toward pneumonia. For sale by Hill
| Orr Drug Co.
= The Japanese have some curious
ideas about their finger nails. One Of
them is to the effect that they must
not be cut before starting on a Journey.
lest disgrace befall the person before
he reaches his destination. Neither
should they be cut at night, lest cats
| claws should grow out. To throw
nail parings into the fire Isl to invite
some great calamity. If, while trim
ming the nails, piece should fall in {
| the fire, the person will soon die.
| Not a few who read what Mr..
Robert Rowls, of Hollands, Va, has
to say below, will remember their own
experience under like circumstances:
"Last winter I had la grippe which
left me in low state of health. |
tried numerous remedies, none of
which did me any good, until | was
induced to try bottle of Chamberlain,,s
Cough Remedy. The first bottle of it
so far relieved me that I was enabled
to attend to my work, and the second
bottle effected a cure" For sale at
25 and SO cents per bottle by Hill
Orr Drug Co.
- In the Royal Gardens at Kew
there is branch of what is said to be
the oldest tree in the world-the
famous dragon tree Oracoena draco)