davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28
HUMOROUS.

-~Hepperton says he won't marry
anyone but widow" Il hope he won't
marry mine" -Indianapolis Journal.
-Hewitt-"Why didn't you laugh at
that joke when 1 told it?" Jewett-
II don't believe in laughing at an old
friend" -Truth.
-Spogs-"Was it not disgraceful, the
way in which Smiggs snored IN church
to-day?" Stuggs-"I should think it
was. Why, he woke us all up."-Tit-
Bits.
Before the Scrap.-Hooley-
yez hear about Casey quittin' work.
at noon yisterday?" Dooley-"Oi did
not. Phwot med imp" Hooley-
''Shure, it wor tn twilve o'clock whis-
Judge.
81 am afraid that actors sometimes
deceive US about the salaries they get, ~
remarked the mild-mannered citizen.
NO." replied the keen observer; "they
may think they do; but they DON'T
Washington Star.
Fine Progress.-"Well, my son. how
are you getting along at college?" asked
the anxious father. They call me a
phenom, governor. l started in as a
substitute and now I'm full back DE
troit Free Press.
Wasn't Bliss.-"What know about
riding a Wheel" said the scorcher
would fill a book" eyes" said the
policeman who had gathered him in
land what you don't know about il
would soon fill the morgue. Chicago
News.
Why, Indeed p Moneyworth-
"Why will the newspapers publish col
umns of the revolving details of muir
ders? Here Pve'wasted two good hours
reading through this mass of trash
about the last ne."-Philadelph
North American.
-Landlady-"The price of this room
is 80 marks. VIII that suit you?" Stu
| dent-"Perfectly" Landlady-''Ther
you can't have it. A man who meekly
accepts such an eXorbitant price, obvi
ously does not intend topay his BILL
Fliegende Blaetter.
Ct understand you have been advo
eating a tax on bachelors" said Single
ton. 81 have" replied Benedict. ''Upor
what grounds do you justify it?' up
onIthe general theory that a man should
be made to pay for the enjoyment of ;
luxury" This he considered very
clever until his wife heard of it, wheI
it seemed to lose much of its brilliancy
| Chicago Evening Post.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28
a STROLL UNDER TIE THAMES.


Blackwell Tunnel Becomes the Pa
rade of LOndon's East End.
For some weeks past the Blackwell
tunnel has been to the tOilers of the
East end what Hyde Park is to the West
end. It is the promenade Il la mode
to as many thousands as can reach it.
Little as it's promoters dreamed-ittle
as his royal highness the prince Of
Wales imagined when in July last the
walk was declared open-Blackwall
tunnel has grown to be the great rem
devious of the people. 1t is their play
ground, their concert hall, their shell
ter from cold and wind and rain, the
trysting place Of lovers destined
to Unfold more than one romance, more
than one tragedy.
1t has already had one death, for
a few weeks ago a van driver was
thrown from his seat and killed. AS
the corpse of the van driver was be-
ing carried out a bystander remarked
to one of the policemen who stand
guard at the Poplar end of this great
feat of engineering: ga dead man,
Ell? Why, I've just counted 20 pairs
of lovers going I'M"
Blackwell tunnel! What a splendid
title for a melodrama! All day and
night the tunnel is lit up by electric
lamps-an Incompatible vista of light
a mile and half long. No wonder,
then, that when several thousand peo-
pie are in the tunnel singing, shouting,
laughing, playing on cencertina, banjo
or Jews harp, the scene should be
one unparalleled in the whole length
and breadth of London.
It will be problem to Mr.. Macdon-
aid, the chief engineer of the great
tunnel, how this huge body of pleasure
seekers is to be managed, when later
on the wintry blasts blow and their
tendency to loiter and reluctance to
leave will increase.
The tunnel was not quite finished
when the prince of Wales opened it.
1t was closed to the public for some
weeks. But since it's actual and per-
manent opening it has been found, in
a dual sense, to fill long-felt want.
There is light and love and laughter
no care, no trouble. no cold, so every
Sunday anyone who is anyone in the
near east takes his wife or sweetheart
for a stroll beneath the Thames.-Lon-
don Mail.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28
Great Waste of Words.

There was once mathematical tutor
in one of the English universities VINO
was in the habit of bOasting that he
neither knew nor cared to know any
thing about poets or poetry and con-
sidered it all "a lot of impractical rot. "
a certain brother tutor, anxious to con
vert him, gave him the famous "Chargo
of the Light Brigade" to read. The
mathematician took it up and began
to read aloud, thus: ''Half league
half league, half league" Then he
banged the book down, eXclaiming, i'm
patiently: ''Well, if the fool meant i
league and a half, why on earth didn't
he say SOP"
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28
THE BOURBON NEWS. TUESDAY. DECEMBER 28 1897

cited the facts, annoyed me. He leis-
urely assumed coat and waistcoat and
proceeded to put away his tools.
Don't alarm yourself, sir; can f1T.d
Mr. Mark. He is around somewhere"
Somewhere! Of course; but where?"
''He ran down to the sands to get
some fresh water for his aquarium"
''The sands! Good God, man, and we
are standing here! Follow me-"
ran at top speed to the waters edge.
Yes, he had left his bucket and wan
dered north, searching, probably, for
shells in the masses of seagrass and
kelp which a recent storm had flung
upon the shore. 1 noted his footprints
in the wet sand, and close beside them
the large, deeply-indented tracks of
Burlington.
Perdition! What if I arrived too
late?
To the south the sands stretched
widely fiat for miles, superb high
way, fringed with low sand dunes; to
the north were the cliffs, jutting prom
ontories of red sandstone, honey
combed with caves. These caves could
be entered only at the lowest tides,
and were favorite haunts of the boy.
In their dim recesSes were exquisite
medus9, pink, purple and green, star
fish, echinoderms, monStrous abalones
and other marvels. One cavern, to
| which the Portuguese had given the
melodramatic title Pirates cave, had a
mighty fascination for Mark. He
listened to the yarns of the ancient
mariners and believed implicitly, with
the glorious faith of youth, that chests
of doubloOns, dead mems bones and 9TH
er relics of Spanish buccaneers were
awaiting discovery. Upon the Pacific
| slope, especially in springtime, tidal
waves are not infrequent and Mark had
received strict orders from his mother
never to venture alone into the caves.
L make no doubt that he ignored these
| commands whenever opportunity
served.
AS 1 ran, vagabond thoughts whirled
| like dervishes through my brain.
recalled the proverbial patience and
cunning of madmen. Burlington, armed
with powerful field glasses, must have
watched and waited possibly for a
full month"; for this very chance. From
my knowledge of the man I shuddered
| to think what foul use he would make
of it.
When l reached the end of the sand 1
paused A cove was directly in front of
me-in fact, a succession of cOves, shell
tered, each one, by frowning headlands.
| At high tide these coves were inaccessi-
BILE from the shore; and already the
waters were tapping idly at the base Of
the cliffs. Seagulls screamed overhead.
| The wet sand was blood-red with sun
set reflections. The sun itself was be-
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28

low the horizon, the day dying fast
and the short spring twilight stealing
swiftly from landward.
Scrambling across the rocks, I
scanned anxiously the semicircular
cove in front of me- No human being
was in sight. Hurrying on, struck
again the sand, and on it the footprints.
These [ followed to the mouth of the
Pirates cave. There-where the peb-
bles hid the tracks-the spoor was lost.
My worst suspicious were realized.
listened intentiy for the murmur of
voices. Then, slipping off my shoes, I
stepped nOiselessly forward. Ny right
hand gripped the stock of a pistol
which lat the urgent request of Gerard)
L carried habitually in my pocket. The
cave had two chambers, an inner and
an outer, the latter lighted by a small
aperture in the roof. I remembered,
with sudden gust of hope, that it was
possible to crawl through this aperture
and regain the cliffs above. 1 had per-
formed this feat myself at much per-
sOnal inconvenience, but Mark made lit
tie of it. Here, then, was a loophole of
escape.
The silence, accumulated by the drip
and trickle of water, was horrible. a
more appropriate stage setting for a
tragedy could scarcely be conceived
The danll walls, Shiny with fungoid
growth, harbored no echo What
nymph, indeed, would haunt so fearful
n 81 l. r. 7
blood-stained hands. And in the deep
crannies and assures were hiding places
for hecatomb of victims.
I am no coward, but horror smote me
in the face
AS L glided in the shadows to the en-
trance of the inner chamber [ heard a
peculiar nOise-a fretting of garments
against rocks. Pistol in hand, | plunged
forward. High up, crawling painfully
across jagged rocks, was Burlington;
but where was the boy?
Haiti" I cried, sternly
The sound Of my own voice startled
me; and it startled the mailman above
He turned suddenly, grasped helplessly
at the Shiny walls, lost his hold and
crashed headlOng to my feet. He had
fallen in the most awkward possible
place, Il rift between two rocks. For
the moment every feeling was ban
ished save that of pity; but how to eX-
tricate him passed my understanding.
He lay senseless upon his back. The
trapezius muscles had borne the brUnt
of the shock and saved him a broken
neck; but in the nature of things he
must have suffered very grave internal
injuries. But the catastrophe added
fuel to the flames of my anxiety on
Marks account. Had he escaped
! through the hole in the roof? Or-I
| dared not finish the sentence.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28
PHILOSOPHER CORRECTED.
BENJAMIN FrankIin's Experience
with a Wig Maker.

benjamin FrankIin's Experience
with a Wig Maker.
When Benjamin Franklin went to
Paris as the representative of the re
VOTED American colonies, he had to be
presented TO the king, and it was mat
ter of some solicitude with him how he
should array himself for that ceremony
He was anxious not to be considered
lacking in respect for the French court,
where much formality regarding dress
was observed; but he knew it would
be an affectation for so simple a repub-
lean as he was to initiate the court
dress. He decided, therefore, and wise
~, to appear i'll a plain suit of black
velvet, with white silk stockings and
black shoes.
Nevertheless, he deemed it best to
make one concession to the French
fashion of the time by wearing a wig
something which he had not been ac-
customed to do. He ordered of a wig
maker the largest one the man had,
and in season for the presentation the
man himself brought the wig and set
about trying it on.
But do all he could, the man could not
squeeze the wig on the philosophers
head. He tried and tried, and also es-
sayed to convince Franklin, against the
evidence of his senses, that the wig was
fit. Finally Franklin said:
81 tell you, man, your wig is not large
CROUCH"
Upon this the Frenchman threw the
wig down in a rage.
"Monsieur," he said, that is imPos-
sible. 1t is not the wig which is too
small. 1t is the head which is too
large"
Accepting the rebuke as deserved.
Franklin went to the presentation with
out amy wig, and found there that the
simplicity of his dress and the honesty
and candor of his manners won him
more esteem at the court than any con-
cession to fashion could possibly have
done.-YOuth's Companion.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28

People looking IL windows are not
always looking at the goods. They are
looking to see MISUNDERSTANDING
ton (Ia.) Democrat.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28

A haSty survey of the cavern some
what treasured me, and 1 remarked.
with satisfaction. that the hands of
burlington were unstained save for the
patches of fungus. that his clothing
bore no evidence of committed crime.
that his features even were calm and
peaceful. Bending over his PROSTATE
body in the sorest perplexity 1 heard
a welcome football, and an instant later
Demetrius stood beside me.
"Mark?" l stammered. Have you
seen Mark?"
He is with his MOTHER" he replied,
coolly. Then he too bent down and
gazed steadily into the face of his en-
envy.
He is not dead, Mr.. Livingston"
The fellow asked no questions. He
accepted the situation with eXtraor-
binary stoicism.
He is very badly injured" 1 an
swered, curtly-''I fear fatally"
What are you going to do?" he
whispered.
DO? Why, get him out of this-at
once"
He laid heavy finger upon my fore
arm.
"Mr. Livingston" - his hot breath
stirred the hair upon my temples-'Mr.
Livingston, the tide is coming in"
The diabolical suggestiveness of the
words palsied my tongue.
THE tide is coming in" he repeated,
slowly, horrid smile upon his clean
cut lips.
1t would be wise, I reflected, to ignore
his meaning.
"Yes," 1 returned, 1--WE have not a
minute to lose. Take his feet, Demetri-
US. Luckily, we are strong men,"
But Demetrius folded his massive
arms and stood erect.
take hold, man.
NO
Then, with a startling change of ia
cial expression, a very petard of words
exploded, a thunderclap from a sullen
cloud. This was his enemy, his mas
ter's enemy, whom destiny had deliv-
cred into our hands. He had been
struck down with foul murder in his
heart. He deserved to die. He should
have died at the hangman's hands a
score of years ago. If we succored him
now, and i'll came of it, the blood
OF the innocent would be upon our
heads.
All this and much more. with amaz-
ing fuency and vehemence. When he
had finished speaking, the plash of wa
ter mingled family with the echo oil
his concluding words. A wave, the her
aid of the incoming tide, had broken
with sullen murmur upon the rocks out
side.
81 have heard what you say. For the
sake of your long years of faithful serv
ice shall try to forget what has passed
Take hold"
"No," said he, for the second time.
LTO BE Continued
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28

.--Godmothers never do anything fol
their godchildren except in story
boolzs.-Atchison Globe.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28
Lark Nnot I'm a sycamore.

When a Manchester (Epgland) timber
merchant was saving sycamore into
lengths he came across lark knot in the
wood an inch and a half in diameter,
When this was cut through it displayed
:he clearly marked outline of bird,
which the merchant deemed curious
enough TO have OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES
Magazine.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28
RAILROAD TIME CARD.
L. & n. E. r.
ARRIVAL OF TRAINS

ARRIVAL OF TRAINS
From Cincinnati-1O:58 a. m; 5:38 p.
m; 1915 p. N.
From LexingtOn-4:39 a. M; 7:45 a. m;
1888 p. N 6:27 p. m.
From Richmond-4:35 a. m; 7:40 a. m;
1928 p. IN.
From Maysville-7:42 a. m., 3:25 p. m.
DEPARTURE OF TRAINS
To Cincinnati AS a. M; 1855 a. m;
$40 p. m.
To Lexington-7:50 a. M; 11:05 a. m;
5:45 p. m; 1921 p. IN.
TossRichmOnd-11:0 a. m; SAB p. m;
1925 p. m.
To Maysville-7:50 a. m: 6:35 p. N.
F. B. CARR, Agent.
The Bourbon news. [volume] (Paris, Ky.) 1895-19??, 1897-12-28
The 90 Instinct.

''Why does a woman always buy hex
postage stamps three at time?"
$50 as to get pennies in change, OF
course"
''What does she want to get pennies
for?''
"Neu. that makes it seem more like a
bargain. Chicago Journal.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1897-01-08
.FIREMEN'S BALL.

The fourth annual ball tender
ed by the Virginia Fire Depart
meot, on Thursday evening last,
was one of those enjoyable af-
fairs where everyone had "a
good time" Nearly one hund-
red couples were IN attendance,
many from our neighboring
cities being present. Music was
furnished by the Gem Orchestra
which organization was rendered
many complimentary remarks
for their accomplishments, and
an elegant repast was served by
Landlord Andrew IN the new
Callaghau block. The company
treasury was about $40 ahead by
reason of the entertainment. 81.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1897-01-08
IN HONOR OF MISS STEVENS.

~ AVNVR OF M1SS S1ETENS.
Wednesday the handsome home
of Supt. and Mrs. John T Jones
was the scene Of a very pleasant
party which was attended by
twenty young people and given
in honor of Miss Emma Stevens,
of Virginia, Mimi, who is visit
ing in this city. The evening
was spent in playing cards and
dancing, dainty refreshments
being served during the course
of the evenings festivities.
Among the guests present were
the Misses Barbara Dolf, Laura
Cudlip, Tillie Carbis Lizzie Mul :
ply, Lulu Byrnes, Agnes Mur-
ray, Metropolitan; Mamie Pow
ers, Marinette; Jessie Colburn
and Clara Dolf. Messrs. Frank
Stein, Sundstrom, Hunting, Cud
lip, Clark. John Oliver. John
Sheelin, Gus Tollen. and Palmer
Zepherin, Brule, Wis.-Range
Tribune, Iron Mountain, Mich.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1897-01-08
PKOCTORkNOTT NO MORE.

The name of the station on the
D. M. & N. railway heretofore
known as P'roctorknott has been
changed to plain Proctor, the
change taking effect with the ad'
vent of the new year. And thus
passeth from local honored re-
membrance the name of J. Proc.
tor Knott, the humorous demo
cratic lawyer end representative
from Kentucky. who made Du'
luth famous by one of his witty
speeches in the halls Of congress.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1897-01-08
MINING NOTES.

The answer Of the defendant
IN the case in which the Ainslie
Land and Iron company seeks
the cancellation of the Ohio Min.
ing compsny's lease has been
filed in the district court. The
Ohio company denies the allega-
ton that it has not carried on
development and exploration
work on the property as it had
agreed. and claims that it has
furnished the plaintiff with the
maps and charts showing the
progress o. the work. which the
complaint alleges have not been
furnished. The answer sets forth
that The defendant company has
expended 100000 In develop
ment, but that it has been una.
ble to mine, except at a heavy
loss, during the past two years,
on account of the poor condition
of the market. It admits the
delinquency in the payment of
royalties charged in the COM
plant. but asks that, in view of
the existing conditions, it be not
deprived of it's rights in the
property, but that the court fix
a reasonable time in which the
defendant may cure the default
which now exists.
Notice has been given to the
Bay View employees of the Illi-
nois Steel company, those paid
by the day, Of a reduction in
wages to take place on February
1st. This is the first cut that
has been made since: September,
1898, when wages were reduced
10 per cent. The proposed re-
duction will affect the laborers,
carpenters, bricklayers and gen.
eral manual workingmen. The
Amalgamated Association will
not suffer. This reduction is
attributed to a general fall in
prices, said TO have been occas
ioned by breach of contract on
the part of certain company in
underselling other companies. |
People acquainted with existing
conditions on the iron ranges,
however, attribute the proposed
cut to the enormous wages paid
miners and the consequent nec-
essity of curtailment of expen-
ses in other departments of the
iron industry.
At about 1:30 a. m. on Sunday
last fire was discovered in No. 1 |
shaft at the Adams, presumablr
set by the accidental fall of a
lighted candle by some of the
miners WHO quit work at 11.OO|
o'clock on Saturday night. The
fire burned until about 800
o'clock on SUNDAY afternoon
being gotten under control,
buring out much of the timber
but not destroying the shaft
house. The accident will tend
to lay off few men until such
time as repairs are made. which
are now progressing rapidly.
Capt. Harry Roberts: of the
Cincinnati, has received orders
from Cleveland to put on a full
force of men at that mine, and !
commence active mining and
stock piling. A force of about
200 men will be put on.
The Bessie mine, at Humbolt. |
resumed active operation Mon
day with a small force, to be in
creased as fast as places can be
made for new employees.
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1897-01-08
MaRRIEf1.

At Mount Pleasant, Ontario,
Canada, on Tuesday, December
29th, 1896, Mr.. Chris. johnson,
of Chatham, to Miss Jessie
Sutherland, the Rev. J. John.
ston officiating. -
The bride is the eldest daugh.
ter Of Mr.. J. S, Sutherland, OF
this city. who is at present visit.
ing at his former home at Pals
ley, Bruce county, Ontario,
The Virginia enterprise. [volume] (Virginia, St. Louis County, Minn.) 1893-19??, 1897-01-08
THE CITY'S GENERAL NEWS
PICKED UP 4ND CONDENSED BIZ
THE ENTERPRISE REPORTER.
Seen. Heard and Belicrc6.

Seen. Heard and Belicrcd.
Hon. Neil McInnis was in the
city yesterday.
Judge Prince was the recent
recipient Of a communication
from Miss Emily Hobhouse, who
is so graciously remembered by
so many of our people for the
the noble work done during her
residence IN this city. Miss Hob.
house is at present in the City OF
Mexico, but will leave for Eng
land the latter part of the month.
Hudson Tanning returned tc
Duluth on Monday, to resume
his high school duties.
L. S.. Loeb. was up from Du
luth on Wednesday,.
J. S. Leary, superintendent OF
the Virginia ;: Light & Water
comrany's plant. went to Duluth
on Wednesday.
The many friends of Mr.. and
Mrs. Z. w. Miller rendered them
a pleasant surprise on Tuesday
evening, at their home at Frank.
lin.
VIM. Danahy and wife of Hib-
bing, are IN the city.
P. Schipley left on Wednes-
day for a short business trip to
M arinette, Wis.
The new board of county com
missioners held its first meeting
on Monday and organized by the
election of Capt. Elisha Morcom
as chairman. The board made
it's principal appointments as fol
lows: superintendent of the poor
A. P. Cook; superintendent o:
the poor farm, A. F. Rockwell
county physician, DR.. A. J. Bra
den.
An application made on behal
of the Stone Ordean and Twoh,
Mercantile companies and othe!
creditors for the appointment o
a receiver for D. G. Christopher
of this city, was granted Satur
day and the court appointed W
R. Triggs to fill the position
Mr.. Christopher formerly con
Quoted a general store in thi
city, recently disposing of hi
business interests to S. Ober;
and Ben Christopher, a brother
DR.. G.. B. Gilbert, of Duluth
was in the city on Wednesday.
Jos. Inderbitzen on Tuesda
purchased of E. E. Bonn the bi
lard and pool tables in the Bo
dega, together with accoutre
ments. and will hereafter run a
up-and-up billiard hall. A pleas
ant manner of spending a leisur
hour may be found with the ivo1
les as company.
Hon. O. D. Kinney was in tn
city on Monday.
DR.. G. w. Miller went tU Du
Ipth Monday.