The record-union., 1897-05-23

letters from the Rev. Charles Richard
son informing you that for $50 he
would prove that you were the right
full Duke Of Middlesex. You sent him
the money. and he sent you a paper
showing that you We're descended from
John Harris, eldest son of the Duke
who disappeared from England in the
year 1888
You're wrong in one thing says
Chicago. I'm descended from James
Harris
And I'm descended from Robert
Harris, says the man from San Fran
cisco.
And I'm descended from Henry Har-
ris, and he was the eldest son, and
don't you forget it, says the Philadel-
phia fellow.
The whole thing is put up job
says 1. The Rev. Charles Richardson
is swindler, and he's probably con-
vinced two or three men that they are
Dukes of Middlesex We may be the
only Dukes on this steamer, but the
next few steamers will be just loaded
down with them. 1 shouldn't wonder if
there were two or three among our
steerage passengers
Then you consider that we've all
been cheated?' asks San Francisco.
Sure of it. my boys says I. We've
been done out of our $50 and the ex-
penses of this trip to England. We
might as well make up our minds to
that without any more words. The
only thing that can give us any real
consolation will be to get square with
the Rev. Richardson, and l propose
that we form a little association for
that purpose and do the thing up in
style
They all agreed to this notion OF
mine, and for the rest of the passage,
which lasted three days more, we
talked the thing over and agreed what
we would do. All the three chaps took
their disappointment like men, though
knew it must have hurt them, judg-
ing from the way felt myself. There
1 had been considering myself sure
thing duke. and calculating to be as
rich as CreoSote when / once got poSs-
ession of the ducal estates. And now
found that 1 was nothing but plain
American donkey, who had paid fifty
dollars to swindler, and had come to
England on wild goose chase l tell
you it made me feel pretty considerable
small, and / was bound that the Rev.
Charles Richardson should feel worse
than I did before me and my friends
should get through with him.
We'll, we got to Liverpool all right,
and we took the first train for London,
and put up at Morley's Hotel. There
we met three more dukes, who had
been talking things over. and had come
to the same conclusion that we had
come to- We all of us had money
enough to give us week in London,
with considerable to spare, and the
three new dukes were anxious to join
square with the Rev. Richardson. We
went to the American Consul and got
him to recommend a good lawyer and
then we went in body~to see the law
yer. and told him we wanted him to
draw up the papers for a stock COM
pany, to be called THE Amalgamated
Dukes, Limited
You never saw chap more aston
ished than what he was.
That's a most hextraordinary
name says he However, 1 suppose
you have right to call your company
any name that pleases you. Now, tell
me what business the company pro-
poses to carry on
1--WE calculate to carry on the duk-
ing business said l.
Never heard Of any such business
in my life,' says the lawyer. Might
l ask you to have the goodness to ex-
plain?'
eve calculate says I, TO carry on
the regular business of British duke.
If you don't know what that is we can't
help it. All you have to do is to draw
up the papers and take your fee.
Whether you understand the business
or not has nothing to do with it.
He didn't say any more, but he
drew up the papers, and undertook to
file them in the proper quarter We
had a capital stock of seven hundred
dollars, divided into seven shares, and
each man took share, paying seventy
dollars down. This give us four hun
dred and ninety dollars in the treasury,
with the right to call on the sharehold
ers for the rest of the par value of the
shares The Chicago chap was made
Chairman, and l was made Treasurer,
and the whole seven of us were Direc-
tors. When we had got this little bus
mess done we turned to and painted
London pretty middling red for a few
days, and 1 will say that, take it by
and large, its first class town.
I'VE all went in a body to see the
original Duke of Middlesex, who had
castle about thirty miles out of Lon
don. We didn't send in our cards, for
by that time we had got to be more or
less ashamed of them, but we told the
man who answered the door that we
were Americans. and would like to
shake hands with the Duke. His
Grace had us shown into the parlor,
and came in to see us, as affable as
you please. Says he:
Gentlemen. I suppose that you are
claimants to my titles and estates I've
had nine American dukes here,
but they told me that they had given
up all idea of prosecuting their claims.
What an extraordinary people you
Americans are! What in the world
makes you all imagine that you are
Dukes Of Middlesex?'
1.-The truth is, Your Grace SAYS I.
that some enterprising scoundrel has
been writing to all the leading men in
America, telling them that they are by
rights Dukes of Middlesex. A good
many of us have been blamed fools
enough to believe him, but 1t hasn't
taken us long to find out our mistake.
Me and my friends know we'll enough
that we haven't any claim that is
worth row Of pins, but we thought
we'd just like to shake hands with you.
q nd fol1 fhat o.,