davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
A MODEL WITNESS.
He Ratified the Lawyer by His Explici
ReplieR,

Replies.
''Now, sir, I hope we shall have no
difficulty in getting you to speak up"
said the lawyer, in very loud, COM
handing voice, according to the Texas
Sitter.
81 hope not, sir" shouted the witness,
at the top of his lungs.
''How dare you speak to me in that
way?" angrily asked the lawyer.
Because can't speak no louder,
sir" said the hostler.
"Have you been drinking?"
Eyes, SIR"
~ should infer SO from your conduct.
What have you been drinking?"
Coffee" hoarsely Moderated the
knight of the stable.
Something stronger than coffee, sir,
you have been drinking! Don't look at
me like that. sir!" furiously. "Look at
the jury, sir! Did youshave something
in your coffee, sir?"
Eyes, sir"
"What was it?" -,
Sugar"
"This man is no fool-he is worse!"
stormed the counsel.
"Now, sir" turning to the witness,
look at me. What besides sugar did
you take in your coffee this morning?''
The hostler collected his forces, drew
n deep breath, and in voice that could
have been heard half q mile away, bel
lowed out:
"a spune! q spune! an nutbin' else!"
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
Turkish War Indemnity to Russia.

Russia has again allowed the sultan
to scale down the annual payment Of
the Turkish war indemnity. In 1878 1t
was contracted that Turkey should pay
$4,000 year for 100 years; in 1892
Russia agreed to accept e 100000, and
now, on the principle of take what you
can get, she agrees to accept 25 per
cent. of the whole indemnity, and ex-
tends the payment over 400 years. OF
course, no Russian minister expects
Turkey to last four centuries more, but
that does not trouble the car. When
the day Of final liquidation comes to the
Ottoman empire Russia will be there
with O long-standing claim.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

Sad Enect of Too Much Candor 10 an
Aristocratic Mansion.
Two fair young girls sat in dainty
sboudoir gazing into each others eyes,
says the New York Herald.
eve are such good friends, Marcia"
said one, "and we can afford to say to
each other just what we think. Now, I
have such n splendid scheme. Suppose
we start out to-day by telling each other
the exact truth, without regard to any
question Of politeness."
"How perfectly lovely, Lobelia,''
cooed the younger girl of the two.
Lets begin right away. What do you
think of me?"
II Think" said Marcia, chat you are
almost as pretty as you think you are,
and when you don't try to be you are
the most charming girl in the world"
"How awfully good of you" rejoined
the other, "and do you know that whe1,
you came In was thinking that you
looked just like one of those big feather
busters which had taken notion to
walk? Only your feet are SO very large
that the illusion was not quite perfect"
Two dishevelled young women, with
their faces cross lined by scratches,
were taken out of that aristocratio
mansion five minutes later md hurried
in an ambulance to the nearest hospital.
A Good Guess.
Jinks Cat party)--You never metmy
wife, did you?
Blinks-Wife7 1 didn't know you
were married. Is she in the room?
"Yes."
"Well, then, it must be that beautiful
creature over there"
by George! You hit it the first time.
She's the most beautiful woman in the
room, isn't she?"
eyes; that's why guessed she was
your wife. You are the homeliest man
in the room, and people always marry
that way."-N. X. Weekly.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

In q case in court New York woman
alleged as one of her complaints against
her husband that he could not be kept
from washing the dishes and doing the
other work about the house contrary to
her wishes. Her protests angered him
to such an extent that he assaulted her,
and he was put under bonds to keep the
peace. From this it would appear that
the New York man would make an
ideal helpmeet for woman who de-
votes her time to politics and the up
lifting of the masses.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

When dog is chasing the chickens al
the other end of the lot woman may
not be able to hit him with stone in
an hours throwing. But let him come
into the house, and she will crack him
with broomsticls every time with neat
ness and dispatch and not endanger
teacup or lamp chimney, where n
man would swipe down all the glass
and china and miss the cur.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
THE DREADED COsUMPTION CAN
BE CURED.
T. A. slocum, M. c., the Great Chemist and
Scientist, Will Send. Free, Three Bottles
Of His Newly Discovered Remedies
to Sufferers,

Editor PLAIN DEALER:-I have discovered
reliable cure for Consumption and all Bronchial
Throat and Lung Diseases. General Decline
Loss Of Flesh and all Conditions of Wasting
Away. By its timely use thousands of appar-
emily hopeless cases have been cured. So proof
positive am OF its power to cure, that to make
It's merits known, will send, free, TO any af-
flicted reader of your paper, three bottles of
my Newly Discovered Remedies upon receipt of
Express and postof11ce address. t. A. SLoouM,
NJ. c., 9S Pine strset, New York.
When writing the Doctor, please mention
this paper.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
b,eo4,eoo,ooo,ooo Descendants.

Every known plant is occasionally
inhabited by its own peculiar aphis or,
plant louise. These curious insects
breed with wonderful rapidity-a
French naturalist proving that a pair
of them will, within six weeks, pro-
duce five generations, or q grand total
Of 1904 200, 900 900 descendants.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
Consumption Among Negroes.

A medical paper prints statistics
showing that in eight of our largest
southern cities the proportion Of deaths
from consumption among the colored
race, as compared with the total NOR
tally, is more than 80 per cent. greater
than that of the white population.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

Pater Familias-How often am to
speak to you on this subject, sir? What
the deuce do-you-mean by using my
razors as jack-knives!
Future Citizen-Enough Of this
that is not proper language to use be-
fore Fanny.-Bay City Chat.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
woodcock Exes In sveden.

Owing to the inhabitants Of Sweden
being very partial to the eggs of the
woodcock it is more than probable that
the breed will be greatly diminished, If
not at last totally extirpated. The eggs
Of the above species are to be seen for
sale in large numbers in the markets in
Stock holm
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

AS result of an election bet a Mil
waukee man will leave his native land
forever on the first of January. This
election bet folly is reaching the point
i'll this country where the law should
step in and save some idiots from them
selves.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
Bell In the Contribution 1,ox.

Alice Morse Earle tells in the Atlantic
of one church where the contribution
box used contained small bell con-
cealed in itwhich would ring only when
n contribution was made. The collec-
ton was usually taken during the ser
mon, and no stingy church-goer could
fail detection,
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
Her Wish, Not His.

Gen. Delighted to meet you.
Your mother and I were great friends
years ago.
Miss Debutante-Indeedl Ihope that
history will repeat itself.
Gen. Oldbeau-Heaven Forbid Your
mother said "no."-N. Y. Truth.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
Breakin. OF the Habit.
at so cents

You're suffering from tobacco habit
The doctor told the dude;
you'll have to give tobacco up
Or quit the world for good"
"I'll do It," said the invalid,
And voice no vain regrets.
Cigars and pipe go by the board;
I'll stick to cigarettes
Chicago Times-Herald.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
A Dramatic Evasion.

"Pilkington has learned to play foot
ball, but he doesn't want his wife to
know it,"
"Why not?'
"she might think he was. healthy
enough to beat carpet. Chicago
Record.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
Different Now.

Mrs. Troubles-When we were first
married, Harry, you never uttered a
complaint.
Mr.. T.--When we were first married,
Jane, I had cash enough to employ
cook.-Pittsbureh Chronicle Tele0ranh.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
His Recollection.

willie, what was the preachers
text?"
"Somethin' about havin' faith like
grain of some kind of seed, an sayin'
to the mountain git q move on you'll
an it'll git."-Chicago Tribune.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
A sens,hla conr.e.

Maiden-What can woman do when
man that has won her affection re.
fuses to marry her?
Lawyers he rich?
mo; hasn't cent?
"She can appoint day of general
Thanksgiving and invite both families
to participate."-N. Y. Weekly.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

AS he paid the bill for the sealskin sack
The maiden's father said with sigh:
1.-THE summer girl is very dear,
But the winter girl comes just as hight!
Chicago Tribune.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
RAPID FOREIGN MAIL.
Quick Transfer Boats to Be Run from
Quarantine TO New York.

Quick Transfer Boats to Be Run from
Quarantine TO New York.
Chicagoans are to receive their for
eign letters from two to ten hours ear
lier as q result of plans of the postal
department to equip a steamboat with
all the necessary paraphernalia to facil-
itate the transfer of mail direct from
quarantine to New York and Jersey
City depots. A steamboat will be fit
ted up in much the same manner as a
railway mail car is furnished and will
be the first floating post Office ever used
in a harbor.
Experiments have been made since
August in New York harbor with ref
erence to the direct transfer of mails
to the railway stations upon which they
begin their journey in this country.
-Four tugs have been used to take
mail at quarantine from incoming ships
and transfer it by trucks to the Penn
sylvania depot in Jersey City, and the
Grand Central station in this city, to
catch the departing trains, thus saving
delay Of from two to ten hours.
While the scheme has worked admira-
bly, the post Office authorities believe
the best results cannot be obtained I'M
til the department controls the service
and has its own boat to meet the in
coming steamers and make quick re-
turn trips to the depots..
The narrowness of the tugs compel
the men to work in cramped quarters.
The new steamboa tservice will do away
with this disagreeable feature. There
will be large force of clerks, porters
and assistants, and the new boat will
have the appearance Of huge floating
distributing station. 1t is believed the
good time now made can be reduced 50
per cent. The post Office department
will ask the next congress to appropri-
ate $4,000 for the service.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
women's Ages.

He-I am waiting for the interesting
woman OF 80 that the novelists talk
about.
she-Well, you won't find her in vi
emma. All the women here under 60
are not over 22.-Illustrated Bits.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
Tho Real Sufferer,

sacks wife has insomnia"
"Poo. creature! That is hard on
her."
mo, it is hard on Jack, for she is al
ways awake when he comes in.'-Chi-
cago Record.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
shoep Stealing In Scotland

The secretary Of Scotland has ap-
pointed a committee to inquire into the
alleged prevalence Of sheep stealing IN
esssztesa 2ssts r gWNaaA ..,.4...-..-..
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
There is no Excuse

There is no Excuse.
If you want to receive the Twice-a
Week Plain Dealer for one year you
can have it whether you have the
money to spare or not. Get us four
yearly subscribers at $1.O0 each and
we will send yours free. t
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

4 widow lady of Kansas City, started
with her arms extended to grope her
way along dark hall one night re-
Gently to awaken her sons and send
them after a burglar who she thought
had just gone downstairs Suddenly
she found that her arms had passed
over the shoulders and around the neck
of man. She Rugged him with the
force of desperation and screamed to
such effect that the burglar broke from
her and ran away in time to escape her
sons. 1t takes a very neryy man to
withstand a hug and scream at the
game time.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

It has been judicially decided in Mis-
souri, that the courts must recognize
Q common-law widower the same as O
oommon-law widow. Sauce for the
.gander" ~ well ~ the ''roose1 -
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
II YOU HAVE 8EEV SICK

and the other doctors cannot help
you, write to me. Do not stay
with them until they cut you open
or kill you with their drugs.
MELVILLE @. KEITH, M. D.,
Belleville, Ohio.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05
TRUTH CRUSHED TO EARTH.

"a spune! spune! an nuthin' else!'
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1897-01-05

No Northwestern far1iis11s list Of
papers is complete without
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
A MASONIC MEMORIAL.

Resolutions of Respect to the Late j..
Addison Leach-Mr. Leach was the
Oldest Subscriber to the News and
Observer.
Thomasville, n. c., Sept. 3.-(Special)
AT a regular communication of Thomas
vile Lodge. No. 214, A. +. and A. NJ,
August It'll, 1897, the following pre-
amble and resolutions were unanimously
adopted:
Whereas, In the inscrutable wisdom
and unquestioned sovereignty of the Su-
preme architect of the universe it has
pleased Him to remove our late brother,
Past Master James Addison Leach from
the labors and fraternal ties of this
earthly Lodge to the glorious refresh
lodge eternal in the Heacens, therefore
be il
Resolved. That we acknowledge our
Indebtedness to Almighty God for his
long life of usefulness and honor and
gratefully record our need of promise
to our brother for the unfailing interest
and jealous devotion he displayed in the
discharge of the duties of the many
Offices of honor and trust in the lodge
church and State to which he was call
ed. A patriotic Confederate officer till
the closing scene at Appomattox, steward
OF Deaf, Dumb and Blind Asylum, for
many years Mayor of his town. member
OF the Legislature for years and efficient
and judicious ma gistrate, a steward OF
his church on whom his pastor leaned,
and to whom his church looked for lead
ership for years master of this lodge
and for twenty eight years never failing
in his attendance upon the Grand Lodge,
in which he was always appointed on
important committees, and held offices
reaching at last that of Junior Grand
Warden, he was signally honored by
the vote of the last Grand Lodge to pay
his expenses for life to the communica-
tons of the Grand Lodge. In all of the
positions and in all measures tending
to advance the interest of church, Lodge
or community he was a leader with zeal
that knew no bounds.
Resolved, That we tender to his grief
stricken family our deep heartfelt sym
pathy and coincidence tenderly COM
mending them to the keeping of Him
who looks with plying eye upon the
widow and the fatherless.
Resolved. That these resolutions be
spread upon the record of the Lodge
and a copy thereof be sent to the family
of the deceased brother and the fol-
lowing papers. the Davidson Dispatch,
the News and Observer. the Orphans
Friend and the Davidson County News
w. f. THOMPSON,
II. w. REMNANT,
]. A. GREEN,
Committee.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
ESCAPED FROM JAIL.
Sheriff Pritchard's Condition is Favor
able.

Sheriff Pritchard's Condition is Favor
able.
Lenoir, n. c., Sept. 1.-(Special 1.-Two
white men and a negro made their escape
from the chain gang last night They had
behaved very well, so well that the guard
concluded it would be useless to keep the
Ichalns on, and they had been removed.
They made their escape from the room
they were confined in at the county
home, where they had been at work, by
taking up the hearth and crawling out.
Nine convicts, eight white men and a
negro, were brought here last night from
Mitchell county, sentenced by Judge
Green at Mitchell Superior court last
week to the Caldwell chain gang. The
Iotficer in charge reports Sheriff Pritch-
ards condition as favorable.
Mr. w. w. Scott, of the Treasury De
partment at Washington, after spending
his vacation at home, returned to Wash
iington yesterday.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
ENGINES DOWNWARD PLUNGE.

Fails to Observe the Open awbridge
Over the Rivera Boys Mutilated
Body Found on Railroad Track. Cot
ton Doing Well.
cial)-There was a serious wreck at
Tunis on the Norfolk and Carolina rail
road last night A freight train of the
Southern Railway Company, was run
ming in from Norfolk. The drawbridgc
at the Chowan river was open, but the
Fengineer failed to observe the signal and
as the train was running slowly across
the river the engine went down in the
draw and one car suspended from the
track The engine is now under the
water and the wrecking train has gone
down from Rocky Mount to remove the
wreck. There was no damage to the
crew, except perhaps ducking of the
engineer and fireman. The trains had
a meeting place at South Tunis and the
engineer from Norfolk saw the train
meeting him standing on the side track at
the meeting point and thought it was
all clear, as he did not observe the sig
nal. Passengers will have to be trans
ferred at that point or there will per-
haps be no travel to Norfolk to-day.
There were FIVE rains in this section
last night reaching as far as Tarboro.
Three new bales Of cotton sold in Tar
boro brought 8 cents. Cotton is opening
in this county and picking will soon
commence.
A colored boy was ground up on the
railroad track near Halifax yesterday
morning. No one knew him and it was
impossible to identify him in any way, so
badly was his body ground up. 1t was
thought that he was stealing a ride.
There are over twenty prisoners in
the jail at Halifax, and the extra term
of Criminal court will be economy to
the county.
Rev. M. l.. Kesler, of High Point.
has been called as pastor to the Baptist
church in Rocky Mount. He has ac-
cepted and has entered upon his work.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
DIR. KINGS NEW DISCOVERY FOR
CONSUMPTION.

This is the best medicine in the world
for all forms of Coughs and Colds and for
Consumption. Every bottle is guaran-
teed. 1t will cure and not disappoint.
1t has no equal for Whooping Cough,
Asthma, Hay Fever, Pneumonia, Bron-
chitis. La Grippe, Cold in the Head and
for Consumption. 1t is safe for all ages,
pleasant to take, and, above all, sure
cure. 1t is always well to take DR..
Kings New Life Pills in connection with
DIR. Kings New Discovery, as they regu-
late and tone the stomach and bowels.
We guarantee perfect satisfaction or re-
turn money. Free trial bottles at any
drug store.
Regular size so cents and $1.00.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
JOhnSOn'S
Chill and
Fever
Tonic
Cures Fever
In One Day.
AN ADVANCE IN FREIGHT
RATES.

The Southern Railway has given no
tice of advance in freight rates on cot
ton at points along the Western Nortl
Carolina Railroad. The advance il
about an average of so cents per bale
This is a considerable advance and will
cause kick from those interested. NJ
reason is assigned for the increase ant
it is not known whether it is general
If the advance is sustained the Railroad
Commission will probably be asked fo
relief in the premises-provided Govern
or Russell doesn't abolish it-States
vile Landmark.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
IT IS TWO OFFICES NOW.
(Statesville Landmark

1t is a queer boast of the State Audi
tor that the work of the State Board
of Equalization is the best" work ever
done in North Carolina" when read in
connection with his subsequent statement
that the value of the property of the
we'll to do and the rich has not been
increased while that of the poor has
been increased 500 to 1000 per cent. We
repeat that this is queer boast to come
from a man who has gotten an office
by bowling about the wrongs of the
poor man.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
JUST so.
(Winston Republican,

This week there will be no issue OF
Senator Buffers paper, the Caucasian
as its office will be moved to that OF
Barnes Bros, who will hereafter print
the paper.
1t is not enough that both Of the Gnu.
casian's editors should find relief. The
paper itself has now been safely landed
and viii know how government pap tats.
1t can now sing
$50 let the wide world wag as it will
Well be gay and happy STILL"
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04

Mr.. James Amos has been appointed
a member of the Board of county com
misSioners to succeed DR.. J. r. Moss,
resigned. The appointment was made
by Clerk of the Court ID. II. Gill, who
has the appointing power. Mr.. Amos
has served on the Board before, was
chairman of it and is not unfamiliar
with the duties of the office,-Henderson
Gold Leaf
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
RTCKLEN'S ARNICA SALVE.

The Best Salve In the world for Cuts,
Bruises, Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rheum
Fever Sores, letter, Chapped Hands
Chilbains, Corns, and all Skin Erup-
tons, and positively cures Piles, or no
pay required. 1t is guaranteed to give
perfect satisfaction or money refunded
Price 25 cents per box. For sale by all
druggists ~
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
1T rs IN SPITE OF BOTH.
(Hickory Mercury

Some papers rejoice that times are
getting better because wheat is going
up, and say it's because we have the
gold standard. Why not say it's be-
cause Russell is Governor of North
Carolina? One has as much to do with
it as the other.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04
ODOM HAS GONE TO CLERKING
(Wadesboro Messenger.)

tWadesbOro Messenger)
The latest news from State Senator
Odom, the man made famous by Gov.
Russell's terrible denunciation druing the
session of the Legislature, is to the eff
feet that he has gone to clerking in a
store at McFarlan. Is it possible that,
after all, Pritchard win go back on
Odom and not give him any pie? Or it
may be the willy Senator has already re-
ceived his reward, and in such shape
that no future embarrassment for Pritch-
ard will grow out of the transaction.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04

John Griffin, Of GAINESVILLE. o., says
81 never lived a day for thirty years
without suffering agony, until box OF
De Wits Witch Hazel SaIve cured my
piles" For piles and rectal troubles
cuts, bruises, sprains, eczema and all
skin troubles De Wits Witch Hazel
Salve is unequalled. Carolina Drug
Company.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04

There is a time for everything; and
the time to attend to cold is when it
starts. Don't wait till you have con-
sumption but prevent it by using One
Minute Cough Cure, the great remedy
for coughs, colds, Group, bronchitis and
all throat and lung troubles. Carolina
Drug Company.
The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1897-09-04

Burning, itching skin diseases Instantly
relieved by De Wits Witch Hazel
Salve. unequaIled for cuts, bruises, burns.
1t heals without leaving a scar. Caro-
lima Drug Company