The Roanoke times. (Roanoke, Va.) 1897-1977, 1897-07-27
THE ARIZONA KICKER
OLD JOHN STARK COMES 10 TOWN
WITH AN ARSENAL.

WI n AIN AhSENAI.
But Givoadam Guich Was Changed and tho
Town Was Not Painted Red a. In Davs
OF Yore-Sad nIishap to a Chicago Nova.
paper Man.
A Chicago newspaper man who wan
dered this way one day last week walked
into The Kicker office and sent MS his
card. We happened to be out, and tho
agricultural editor received the card and
then went out with two guns and held
The poor man up against the wall for
half an hour till we could be sent for
In doing this he acted under the belief
that the man was an assassin. The east
ern way is to send your card to the ed
itor, and if he doesn' It like the looks of
your name or one corner Of your card
has been torn off in the teeth of bear
trap he sends back word that it is his
busy day. It is not the western wav
however. If you want to see western
editor, and particularly an Arizona ed
itor, you just walk into the shop and
kick the sanctum door open and utter
yell of welcome. If you have u gun in
your hand, it may hold him down until
you can explain that you called to shake
hands instead of to shoot. No cards for
us. Just walk right i'll and feel at home,
and if we are winding our cuckoo clock
when you enter please drop into the
chair at the head of the table.
Old Times Gone Away.
His honor the mayor (who is ourself)
hn OIL n a
John Stark, who lives in cave 20
miles away, that he would enter Give
adam Gulch OH Wednesday and hold up
the town for four hours. We were ready
for him. At O'Clock in the afternoon
the distant rumble of thunder proved
that old John was approaching the city
line. Ten minutes later there were wells
and shouts as of band of warriors, and
five minutes after that the man was in
the lookup and wondering what sort of
transformation had taken place. He
had on him rife, "a shotgun, two re-
volvers, single barreled pistol, two
knives and tomahawk, and yet no one
was hurt. Up to year ago old John
used to hold up the town regularly once
n month and had come to look upon it
as his privilege. He can't understand
why old times nave passed away and a
new deal has taken place. When given
his liberty Thursday morning, he broke
down and wept, and he solemnly as
sured us that he should buy barrel of
whisky and bag of meal and never
leave his cave again except to hang
himself. We feel sorry for the old man
and few others like him, but who can
stop the march of civilization?
A RegrettabIe Occurrence.
Thursday evening last Mrs Major
Hopkins gavo very recherche affair mt
her residence on Cochise place, and that
it ended i'll a lamentable manner is not
i'll the least her fault Indeed it was
the fault of man who was invited to
be present through accident, and whose
conduct proved that he would have been
more at home i'll "a cowboy camp. We
refer to the SO called Colonel Clay, who
has been hanging about town for the
last four weeks and claiming to be- in
tercsted in mines. AS we are the ac-
knowledged leader of society in Give
adam Gulch we were, of course, asked
to lead the german. When everything
was ready, the colonel instructed us
that the first movement was double
shuttle. We disputed him, and he called
us liar. Owing to the presence of Ia
dies we ignored him, but he turned to
Mr.. Davis. Captain Scott and others
and made himself SO offensive that he
was finally knocked down and dragged
outdoors. In the struggle he pulled his
gun and sent bullet into the leg of ex-
Judge Holden, inflicting n severe wound.
This broke up the party, and the COLO
mel was given one hour in which to get
ont of town. He got, and it will be
wise i'll him not to return. We are not
exactly up to Fifth avenue style out
here, but we know when to doubleshuf-
file and when to prance. The whole town
is sorry today that tho man was not
hanged instead of being allowed to ride
away.
Flying Editor.
We do not know the editor of the
Grass Valley Banner i'll IL personal way.
We simply know that his name is Clark
and that he is more competent in q
mental way to pound sand than to edit
Il newspaper. We said so Il few days
ago, after locking over his last issue,
which was disgrace to civilization,
and no sent us note daring us to meet
him at the crossing of Panther creek at
noon on Friday. We had INTENDED to
go, but at the last moment some i'm
portsnt business came in and we sent
our new agricultural editor in our
place. He has voice like two ton fog
horn and is cross eyed and has hair like
bristles. He relates that he saw Mr..
CLARK waiting while yet half a mile
away, and when he had decreased that
distance one-half our agricultural man
uttered Il yell. 1t was one of his ordi-