The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1897-02-18


painstaking way in which he impaired
such successful bits of fiction were to
be builded, it must be said that his eff
forts to assist me were fruitless. Either
Bill sober forgot the principal features
of the plots mapped out by Bill drunk,
or his listener was sIngularly obtuse
and failed to see things as Bill himself
did. At any rate, am not going to tell
what became of the three or four manu-
scripts in which some of old Bill's ideas
were embodied.
This saddened Bill and made him
Torose. The last straw came in the
shape of a note from an editorial friend
who had publisheda number of sketches
of mine, in which he frankly stated his
private opinion that | must have an
awful nerve TO expect him to read such
rot, much less publish it. l handed the
letter to Bill. He read it in silence,
then, with some lurid profanity direct
&C at editors in general, turned and left
the office.
At five o'clock in the afternoon he
came back, drunk and abusive, and
wanted what money was due him. l
tried to dissuade him, telling him we
wanted him to stay with the office
awhile.
"I' deuce with you an tn otfice!" he
roared. Gimme my time."
But the banks closed, Bill" plead
ed. Won't a few dollars do until to-
morrow"
me-my-time-now
went out cashed a check with some
difficulty, and came back and gave Bill
his money. He went out growing.
Next morning he came in showing the
effects of his debauch, and sat down by
the stove.
Ready to go to work, Bill?" asked.
NO. I'm goin' t hit tn road" he
said, grut1ly. "C'n We let me have four
bits?"
Great Caesar, Bill! You won't quit
US, with all those jobs on the booll?" l
cried. in dismay.
Might as well. Won't be any good eff
I stay he replied, with considerable
frmness. DO git tn four bits?"
He got it, and, after shaking hands all
round, he disappeared in the direction
of the railway station.
About six months later Bill foated
into the office again. If he had been
sober during the interval there certain
~ was nothing about his appearance to
indicate it. | have seen almost every va
riety of bum and tramp, but in all my
experience | cannot recall meeting one
of such thoroughly unwholesome APP
pearance as Bill presented that morn
ing.
VIE gents, sonny?" he hccoughed,
cheerfully. holding out his dirty paw
know me?"
surveyed him with ilI-concealed dis
gust, as remarked
at is possible that bath and bar
Der might disclose the face and form of
my old friend Bill. But now-great
Scott, Bill! Go and get bath and a
hair cut"
He took the dollar I gave him,
chuckled hoarsely and left, to return in
about an hour somewhat improved in
appearance and ready for work.
Say" he remarked. as he took off his
coat, 1--WE got tn best derned plot FIR
short story We ever heard of. I'll tell We
T. night"
But alas! it was like all the others he
had given me. and quite as valueless as
those he subsequently impaired to me
during his three weeks soiourn with us.
At the end Of that time he departed in
much the same manner as before. He
got drunk, went broke" borrowed a
half-dollar again, and walked out of
town.
\ year or so after the death of the
always sickly journal, of which I had
been editor-in-chief from the beginning,
I met Bill in Chicago. was then doing
police" on one of the morning papers
and it was while attending The Monday
morning ''rOund-up' at the old Armory
station that l became aware of his pres
ence. As the police judge. after looking
at the name on the sheet before him.
remarked something about Jim jams"
being more appropriate name than
"Iiams," I glanced up, and there, in the
prisoners dock was old Bill, looking.
oh! so tough! but with 4 knowing leer
on his face as he recognized me.
| whispered to the Judge, who
grinned. "Old friend, Ell? William. the
officer says you were drunk and disor-
derby Saturday night How about ?"
"Guilty, Judge" said Bill, cheerfulIy.
"M-hm. Ever been here before, Will
liam?"
Not as many times s ought e
been"
Coming again? No? Discharged.
Your friend here wishes to see you, Viii
liam"
Bill was entirely unabashed when
met him at the door, and seemed greatly
amused at my suggestion that he ought
TO be ashamed of himself 81 never
thought you'd come to this, Bill"
said. severely.
Fiddle de dee, boy! Likewise
rats. replied Bil, with coarse disre-
gard for the dignity of my official star.
EFF I had two bits FIR ev'ry time that's
happened. I would be tryin' Z borrow
a dollar now" he continued, adroitly.
He got the dollar and on the way up