The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1897-05-06

thing is ready for you. The janitor is
up taking look out of the observa
tory for the airship.'
Now 1 have made some bad mistakes
during my life and as 1 felt those
wings slide into place 1 realized there
are others. 1 smiled. He said: 'you
are happy; am glad to know it but if
you don't like it there come here and
make out your application and be sent
to another planet" Then, with dash
of forget-me.not cologne, he said,
''walk right in, just as if you owned
the place." 1 did and as 1 saw an ar
bor covered with blush roses I lodged
behind it unperceived. l was bewil-
dered. AS far as l could see were the
most beautiful females, all in white
with wings the same length, hair flow
ing over the shoulders, and waists no
larger round than my coffee cup; and
all talking at once yet could under
stand them all readily. l thought if
the women on earth knew of the
state of affairs here they would all take
the laudanum route and be here except
few old maids who might stay to
corner the matrimonial market.
But got move on me for 1 feared
the janltor would show up, so l
launched forth by wing. Alas. one
wing would 60 ahead, the other backed
up; not mates, twas plain. But the
move was fatal was discovered
Then such scream! 1 had heard it
before at my first entrance into JAIL
"Fresh fish," A little sIangy for the
locality, but quite proper, nevertheless.
Then began scene that beggars de-
scription. l was encrcled by Chinese
wall of talking beauties. Everyone
was clamoring, "who are you?" The
same old answer was given. 1 am one of
the Five Hundred "Oh! Do you know
Tiffany, Worth, the Astors; did know
Mrs. So and so of Fifth avenue and
Miss So and so of Fifth avenue?" 1
was in fix; the only soul on Fifth av-
enue [ knew was policeman. But
did not say so. l had no time; he had
coat that belonged to me, but how he
got it and why l did not go after it l
leave the reader to guess. And such
other questions l got till my head
swan round and round
Now a terribly detestable odor of
musk 1 smelt and a strawberry blonde
sailed into my presence. They all
looked to her, and felt by instinct she
was the ringleader. With wave of
her hand she said: 'who was at your
funeral?' How should | know, so |
commenced: the Warden and Deputy
and Chaplain-but l saw they grew
suspicious, so l fell back on my Yam
kee wit and said: one lady had such a
peach of an Easter bonnet. If [ could
get them to talking bonnets and such
brio brac l hoped to get loophole
through the crowd and make a clean
get away. But no; bonnets and puff
sleeves did not count there. "But who
else was there" exclaimed the whole
outfit. l had met my Waterloo and
the quicker let the cat out of the bag
the better.
Well there was Tom-and Bill-and
Jack. "What were they doing there ?"
said the musky damsel. Five years
apiece for fooling a farmer with the
gold brick swindle. "Oh! he is from
Sing Sing some exclaimed; others said
"San Quentin" At last they fixed on
saltwater. Yes, am from Saltwater;
and wish I was back there.
Oh! if could get the doctor in there
for five minutes with that crowd clam
oring around him l would be even on
all old scores. I made for the door but
l was not to get out till my pride was
trailed in the dust and humiliated to
the last notch. A sympathetic looking
beauty approached me and said: 81 am
from Boston, you are from Minnesota.
You are lucky, all the people from
Minnesota are too green to burn" 1
held my anger as best 1 could and re-
piled: thank you Miss Beans from
Boston, for the information also the
compliment.
1 soon reached the door, and