Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1897-01-21
From NICK. Boom.
On THE ROAD, Jauuar.

| OS The hOAD, OdOudFf, 1880.
My Dear Boy-Iu recent letter to
you, attempted to make myself known
as man you met on an Iron Mountain
train some time ago. l would like to
take you where | left you--on a rail-
| way train. l have met several people
! from your locality since | wrote you
! and with one in particular | had a
singular experience, but more of that
| later.
am now at the great Union Station.
ST. Louis, where everything is hustle
AID confusion, here Won meet all class
es of people in all conditions of life.
You see the ''curious" man from the
country on his return trip from his
first visit on the ''kears" with his 'tpa-
per mache" face watching everybody
and everything, with a paddock on his
trousers pockets and a cunning ''leer"
in his eye, which says "Boys, leave
me alone, l am onto you." There
comes the country merchant looking
for ''jobs" to paralyze bis customers
with; he is gotten up in great style;
he puts on pair of tooth pick shoes
(taken out of stock) forgets to remove
the pound of clay he gathers on the
way to the depot, and. hearing that
the Mississippi river runs through st.
Louis. puts on his ''high water pants. -
He notes the displays in the large re-
tail stores IN the city but is not con-
WINGED that they can "toueh" him in
prices.
Now watch the county official who
comes to town to see how the city
..ehumps" do business. He brings his
cunning look with him and shows his
badge of authority in the cut ''Johpa-
than wild coat and has been telling
the train butcher" if he wants to see
business done to the Queens tasteh
he wants te come down his way.
Look at the '.mashers" just arrived
from their town, who in their hurry
to catch the early train have put their
shirt cuffs on where their collars
should have been. Their first break
is for tonsorial artist who can split
eacL hair in their mustache into three
parts aud bush it out. They are then
ready for the promenade. The beau
Brummels' of the day, they commence
to "nash," but after a few vain eff
forts they learn that there are 10th
ers," and wind up by kicking over an
ash Darrell and hunting their uncle"
to get the .swhere with ali" to return
home.
SO we meet them all; the newsboys,
the farmer, the real estate man, the
banker, the cattle dealer, and the
newspaper man, all pushing aud ell
bowling their way through this life as
if the next hour was the last.
While standing and watching this
great panorama my attention was
tracted to a rather elderly looking
gentleman with benevolent face and
''Vandyke" whiskers, sometimes in
vulgar parlance called '.geatee.
He was wedged between the iron gates
leading 20 a south bound train He
was xpostulating with the gate keep
err who demanded he show his ticket.
The old gent told him he knew
what was s.due the travelling publIc;n
that he had left his station half doz-
eu times in his life and was never com
PEELED TO show his ticket until on the
cars, but he could do nothing With the
stony hearted gatekeeper, so. laying
down his bundles. he commenced his
search for his ticket. After emptying
his pockets Of number OF papers. and