Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1897-05-25

-~
"RELIGroS Is MAXIM A FOOL o. JIM" SEE |.
to trade horses, cows, wagons, farms or
anything that belongs to them at any
and all times customer may present
himself. Jim lives on a farm n mile
from the old mans.
"You sec, boys, continued the speak
er, my boy Jim had bay mare that
he traded yearlin bull IN cross tooth
harrow fur. She was good critter an
no mistake. / wanted that mare the
wust kind an made Jim heap Of good
offers fur her, but he wouldn't bite.
Last "Wednesday he come TO my house
kind o. carelcsslike and sot down on the
front stoop. was a-choppin kindlin
wood fur mornin Jim sot there a-lookin
up an down the road whistlin the
Sweet BY an Bye kind o. to hisself.
When / carried in my kindlin, sot
down OH the stoop by him.
"'Jim, seq, you better let your
old father have that bay mare O. yourn,
sez /.
Jim had Jest started the second
verse O. the Sweet BY an Bye, but he
whistled her all the way through afore
he answered me.
81 ben thinkin O. lettin you have
the mare, pap seq he, 'seein's you got
yer heart sot on er so, sez he, 'pervidin
we kin git up dicker. sez he.
Jim had been goin to camp meetin
pooty steady fur week back. an / heerd
he was gettin serious. He hadn't been
whistlin nothin but hymn tunes fur two
or three days, an when he come around
SO nice on the mare question made up
my mind that me an the old woman
would see him jinin the mourners fore
long.
Jim, seq, 4 kin stand $50 fur
the mare, sez l.
Jim looked up the road, an hum:
med a verse Of Come ye sinners, poor
an needy Then he sez:
Pap, sez he, I know orto let
you have that mare fur them figures,
sez he, but you know I've refused dou-
BILE that fur her, sez he. An so he had,
boys, sure.
i" Jim, seq again, I think ! could
raise the eighty about twenty more,
maxim hundred. sez /, but that's all
kin do. Remember, Jim, sez I. that
! am your father, al I'm gittin old,
an my hearts sot Oh that mare, sez l.
"Plunged in a gulf Of dark despair,
hummed Jim, lookin plumb up to the
sky. I guess he got away with two
verses afore he said anything to me. an
I didn't interrupt his singin. Then he
seq:
Pap. SEE he, I'll tell you what
I'll do. Give me $780, sez he, AN
throw in them two Berkshire pigs, an
the mare is yours, Sea he, Jest as she
is
"A bargaini' ses ]. The pigs is
yours, an I'll be down after the mare
tomorrow, sez l.
~ counted out the 500 an give 1t to
him. He druv the pigs home with him.
They was worth $40 apiece, easy. l
could hear Jim whistlin Hold the Fort
till he got half mile away.
'Jemima, sez to the old woman,
'Jemima, seq I, I never thought Jim'd
Qit pious, did you? But I've got the
bay mare, sez l, an what the old boy
Jim was thinkin of I can't see. She's
worth $3.50 any day in the week, / sez-
Religion is maxim fool o. Jim. sez L
"Well, next mornin early / went
down to Jim's to git the mare. Jim had
gone to town. l saw his wife.
"I've bought the bay mare, Nancy,
SEE /.
"'Yes, know you have, seq Nancy,
GRIMM all over her face.
Where is she?' ! sez
"'She's down in the stone lot sez
Nancy, GRIMM more'n ever
II thought it was funny that the
mare should be down in the stone lot,
but went down to find her. Boys,
found her. She was layin behind big
stone heap, deader'n door nail Iwent
back to the house.
"Why, Nancy, SEE !, the bay mares
dead!'
" oh, yes sez Nancy. laughin as
Y she'd split She died yesterday morn
| In with the collie, sez she.
Boys, for minute ! was mad.
Then come to- an sez to myself: III
be glued il don't git the mares shoes,
anyhow SCI !. So went back to the
stone lot to draw her shoes of. Boys,
I'll divide my farm up between You II
Jim hadn't drawed them shoes hissef.
and the mares feet was as bare AZ when
she was born.
"Now, amt no ways mad at jim,
bows, for II was fair IN square dicker,
m is shows there's stuff in him; only
he mought "a left the shoes ON the mare.
What want to know is, can't | get
back at the camp meetin folks some
way for damages? Fit hadn't "a ben for
them hymn tunes Jim larnt at the meet
in'A I'd a ben a-lookin out fur him.
But they throwed me of my guard
The way look at it is that the camp
meetin society is responsible for me los
In my 900 and two $l5 pigs. Cant
git back at 'em for trespass. or false
pretenses, or excessa-y afore the fact,
Or somethin: Can do it. boyss'