The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1897-08-28
One Thing and Another.

u oAOAShNA
worst of it, but it is usually the other
fellow.
The ife of IA man of SO became the
mother of twins the other day IL
Indiana.
Many people d" not know the deriva-
ton of The word fad" +. A. ID.
me an for a day.
Frrnchmen are more ~succtssful as Il
rule IN leading IL dual life than in dying
d dual death.
In The case oil crash trousers it is no
uncommon for one leg 10 grow shorter
while the other grows longer.
The Emperor Of Morocco has ban
ished bicy cles from his realm. bnt In
Morocco II man can scorch without n
wheel.
The author of the little book, "HoW
Te Get Rich,' was imprisoned for deb
in the Ludlow street jail, New York,
last week.
A mad dog in Il paint shop-some'
thing that happened in Kansas City
r~ecenily-is very little better than 8
bull IN a china shop.
A kentucky colonel was shot and
killed at a circus the other day, thu:
giving the spectators Two performances
for one admission.
1t is reported that the sugar king
Havemeyer, has suggested as a substi
tute for the motto on the silver dollar
ain Sugar We Trust"
A combination of green corn ant
raw apples finished up an Indiana mar
who had passed through forty cam
paigns of paw-paws and chestnuts.
Twenty pounds of wool taken from
the coat of a French poodle Is TO bt
converted into Il suit of clothes by s
New York man who isn't afraid o.
fleas.
A Boston man was supposed TO bt
doing something quite romantic II
marrying his deceased wife's best CIR
| friend, until it was discovered that she
was very rich.
Two venerable and popular supersti
lions will be confirmed by the arrest,
on Friday, of a Kansas City negro with
a sack in his possession containing
thirteen chickens.
La Bruyere: "a slave has but ont
master. The ambitious man has a!
many masters tas there are persons
whose aid may contribute 10 the ad'
vancement of his fortune"
II has Just been absolutely demon.
strated by the scientists of the Nava,
observatory that the Washington mon
ument, 555 feet high, shifts four inches
out of the perpendicular on every hot
day.
As IN instance of the degree of inia-
ton among the people of the Buckeye
stat, Il ten thousand dollar damage
suit at Chillicothe has grown out of an
offensive reference 10 an Ohio mans
feet.
A newspaper of North Carolina con-
iains an advertisement offering a hotel
for sale. The description states tina,
it is kept by the widow of Zach Hud-
gins, who died last summer on a new
and improved plan"
AT the P~an-American exposition 10
Niagara Il bicycle track six feet wide
running around the entire grounds will
be raised upon trestle work and left
open 10 give a good view of he grounds.
Elevators at two points will raise and
lower the wheels.
Fame may be acquired easily in a
small town, but sometimes. it takes a
long while. The most noted man in
Auburn, Me-, Is u man who is publicly
known 10 have worm the same straw
hat twenty-s six summers and the same
cloth cap forty two winters without a
break for repairs or renovation.
Daniel Webster's dying words, 81
still live" are doubtless familiar to
every school boy. Said a backwoods
farmer in Maine last week s'There
was a big politicioner who died in
Massachusetts quite a spell ago. The
papers said that when he died the Bos-
ton folks put his image IN their win
dows and the funeral lasted all day.
Come to think of it his name was Web
ster. Well, this great man got off a
good thing just before he died. He
riz up in bed and says he, Il amt dead
yeti"
A Georgia story from real life: A
negro rented u farm from a man who
had a store, but for everything he
needed during the year the renter paid
cash. At the close OF the year he had
Il fine crop on hand and plenty of
money in sight. The rent was paid in
full, and he solicited another years
lease from his landlord. "You can't
rent from me no more" said the land
lord. 'sI'm done with you for good. ="
didn't | pay you for all I gotP" asked
the negro, "and amt | ready TO pay
you in advance for another yearP"
s'That's just where the trouble comes
in,'' replied the landlord. "YOu're
too fond of payin' cash. What | want
in my business is a niger that farms
nm a cradit