The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1897-12-19
ETIQUETTE or PRESENT GIVING.
We'll DEFINED Rules That Should Govern
tho Exchange 0f 0iflH Between
Friends

fnmnthinE mUfu thhi d am poHMpilB ol
Tho future. tho question ~ present giVing
demands our attention. The peace ana
good will or the holy srisjn are p"rhnpn
responsible for lho very general desire 60
Eivr some Christmas tokens 0f our friend
ship 10 those nround ns -, uH hope thni
a duHro 10 receive gifts IN r-turn does
not actuntc u- aH we'll Tor that would he
tho wornt " taste and lrt Ne be- cnrcful
80 glvo the tokens IN such thctfnl MANNER
that they may not bu chua,s ~ on"na"
Present giving iH nt all times "a crucial
test ~ tact. for nothing lfiwss tho lcli'
cato bloom ~ friendship sooner than a
hrualuoly given or r"colwi prrs"ni. To
give n present IN tho right SPIRIT 10 a great
achievement II must. in The nfHt ln-
stance D. selected with careful consider
alton ~ the giycr AMI receivers relative
positions 4 woailiy person should not
s,rk 20 crush popr one hy the mag
ninr7nco of hor sir neither must she
humiliato hrr by tho ohlrnt1tiour utilliy
~ tho pruaont she has selected
Whcn rkA woman Offers winter
cloak 40 a lrcartt 10 poor friend. md
aayr. II thought this would D. ~ useful
TO you any dear" she N trcading win
the fui weight ~ hor sold.laden person.
upon th~ srnnltivo corns u the impoy"r,
shod one. who perhaps viii not rcrl her.
sir aide 60 rvfunr the unw~lcumo sir
tbiisnnntly aa she IL grvatly disposed 20
DO bocauH- N thu unfortunate fact that
tho Offered cloak would really pruy. most
useful 10 hrr and b-raus- IN her poverty
nho Gan not anuri to orcnd anyone whose
help mish. be- urgently needed on some
fuuir' 'rnlny day"
tuirsH a rich woman e. on the mos; N.
ttmnic terms with a poor one she should
mover pr-nent hor Nisi articles of Wcar.
lns apparel ~ rucA Sits H~sn TO pre-.
nuppo-r the cxtrrmr poverty Of the r..
cipieni and give ervit ofIcnsc. II IN. be.
siiss rn dimrult To ,hooa. ghrmcut for
another N1nan that viii rtaliy supply q
Ions fcll want" ana yet n she noyoy
lets us see hcr wearing g. Ne feel Offended
and sighted. and q breach invariably &C..
suits II is for tiirJr two reasons that
Fifla of coalumra cluaks. hats. etc should
rarely bo made lr1m one woman 10 nn,
other. ami ~ course "a gentleman must
ucyrr make such pr,'Srnis To- - lady unless
he bo In tho close relationship Of "a father.
uncle husband or brother
Among suitable gifls that can bo Of,
for~i ana accepted WtMoul ofrcnsc. We
can ~ course. iuclud- gloves aud furr
Even from e masculine friend woman
might accept VITA easy mind as a Christ.
mas present, nice box ~ gloves or a
fashionable fur no,klct or mum though
anything mot,' elaborate IN the FUR way
would b. unacceptable because too cx.
pcnsivr.
~ have dufI,d into this section Of
the great present. giving question. It may
~ as we'll 10 nnlYf q brfop returning TO-
the givlng and receiving % sits among
women
No man, save a near Nsntiyo. must ofrcr
woman cNpcnaivc iewclry. OF expensive
gifta ~ any description; bu, should he
ofrcr them IN lgnorancr, thr lady must be-
careful TO rvruso 80 kindly that he may
not fccl offended Men do not ~ a rule.
trouble themselves about small details II
etiquette but they always respect WON.
an who claims its aid as u support 20 her
own dignity. even though handsome
present mlS be- sacrificed by SO doing.
To accept "A valuable gift from man
places thr woman under a certain obi.
cation 20 him and ctNatcs bond or IN.
mlliarity with which she could well dis.
pcnsN Men are. As "A whole. very prone
TO tho giving OF gifts, but they do not ferl
any grStt n0~Vsion of respect Tor the
woman who win accept anything and
everything from them without question
\ married lady. In particular. should un.
der no conditions receive present from
huy man outside OF her immediate circle
of mnlc rcldtlons, But should a lady have
accepted u book, music or any other small
article, from u man. 1t would be a nice
compliment that she should let him see
she values II. and makes use of II. The
stronger sex have a great weakness Tor
praise and lattcry, and Il natt"rs them
when anything they have presented Is
utilized, while little passing natural ref.
crcnces TO It make them very pleased and
proud of themselves. II II a cheap and
easy way Of making u man happy. and
should not be neglected ny my sex.
To Il hancc gir may desire to make
some small present but lf she wishes
truly to plc,sc him SHE will beware OF
giving him n present of jcwclry; silver
clgnr case Is the very utmost that his
manly dignity could accept without pro.
test
Returning to presents between ladies',
II may be said that an elderly lady could
quite rightly give present II costume
or iackot to young girl and the latter
need nike no offence at the Offering;
young girls can also make Gifs Of wear
Ing apparel to each other. and no rules
Of good breeding would he violated
Should people Of limited means feed Il
Imperative 20 give some Christmas offer
Ing to friends mudh richer than them
sely X, I should suggest that the gift be
modest and unassumng. The giver
would injure both herself and her friend
" she spent big sum Of money upon a
glft that could be purchased without the
slightest Inconvenience by the friend Il
she needed Il. It would be much wiser
to give some handsome piece Of person
ally worked needlework or dainty