The record-union. [volume] (Sacramento, Calif.) 1891-1903, 1897-04-23
THE OFFICE BOYS DIARY.
1t Throws a Searchlight on rlany
Scantily Understood Subjects.

The boy in certain downtown Office
keeps a diary. The following extracts
are merely fragmentary, and relate to
his employers experiences in securing
a satisfactory typewriter
Say, l nearly died a-laffin' to-day
She wasn't much on looks, and was so
nervous that her back hair shook down,
but felt sorry for her, s'help me- The
boss started in dictatin' and she bang
ed away on the keys like a good fellow
for about fifteen minutes, and then all
of sudden she went in a heap and
said, Would you mind saying that over
again, 1 forgot to put any paper on
the machine? Say, you can just bet
the air was in rainbow shades for about
fourteen minutes and a quarter. =
Dis girl is peach, but she kant
rattle the types a little bit. She gave
me the glad hand and / told her / would
use me pull with the boss to give her
the sit, but he threw her down when
she spelled all the big words the way
I do.
This one seems to be right in the
swim with US. She's a troolylooler. and
no mistake. Works her machine like
| railway train behind time, and eats
chocolate creams for lunch. She's a
daisy locker, too. The boss told her to
consider herself engaged, and hope we
have got settled down at last. If l had
to have kept on receiving and making
myself agreeable to so many fairies as
have been doing lately the boss would
have been struck for more dough. A
man can't do that kind of work for any
three a week. The neckties cost more
money. This girls name is Witchin-
Miss Bewitching 1 called her lust for a
jolly. She only laughed, but treated me
to cream, so know I'm solid there.
= y
Say, the boss old lady didn't drop in
yesterday, mebbe. Oh, no; of course
not. And she didn't have a wild look
in her eye when she spotted Bewitch-
ing? L knew what was coming, you
can bet. 1t was BeWitching, chase your
self, just as the boss had to tell her
next morning. Although he did give
her a whole weeks dope in advance.
He's Sood-hearted for a boss, but he
lets his old pair of boomers run the
whole game for him. Shed a-been after
me long ago if l hadn't told her that
we used to live on Fifth avenue once,
and that since me fadder lost all his
money he would not let me go any,
where but to the wyemseea readin'
rooms.
This girls face amt in the running
at all but you can bet your life that
her muscle is. 1 tried to mash it. and
she grabbed me by the collar and shook
me till my back teeth ratified. But 7
say L wish there'd been a crowd to
see her tackle the machine, The very
flrst time she plunked on it she
broke the capital m all to ballyhunk.
ana a piece of the steel flew over and
took the boss over the left window
L told the boss that he ought to try
buck operator and stop fooling with
| the lady push, and he said that it was
the only sensible thing that he had
ever heard me get off. We got one. too
that's pretty fair, but he's getting a lit
tie bossy, and unless he squares him
| sell with me I'm afraid Wen have to
| bounce him. But I'm so tired of this
changing business that I'm going to
try and stand him for a while. st
| Louis POSt-Dispatch