The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-07
A chronological Proof.

with cattul. which sort OF diskormodes
a cowboy from getting on the warm side
of Koopid
That wuz the case with Bill Winters,
my pardner. who Is now temporarily so
journing in the Kansas pen.teash:ary al
Lansing. There wuz in the toun al the
time of which I am riting a young woman
by the name OF Sally Watkins. Sally wuz
a dressnsker un a purity gocd-iooking sor.
of a suri AZ she wuz by far the best
luking gur in the toun. OF korse she
didn't wunt for soo,ors. Then. besides,
she hadn't bin there long IN people hadn't
gut onto her drawbacks. BIZ Winters jes.
took one look al that guri IN then he de-
cided 20 go in 10 win or bust. He kun
to see me about 1t. as;ing me how 10
proseed.
Well" seq I. ''yeu want TO kwote a
mighty fine man. benevolent, kind IN con-
sideTate IN awl that
81 can't kwote pottery" he sed. ''Un
what's more. I amt a7going III. II l
wunt bur I'm going III talk her-that's the
way l argufy IL If I wunt hur. why can't
Iso tn hur un say: Kun 10 my arms
un have that settle it?''
'Coz. mebbe she don't wunt YOU" sed /.
He he'd never thot ot that, IN II sor;
OF puzzled him. Finely tole him 10 GO
ahed un du what his instinx bid him un
he cudn't go mutcn wrong
But instinx wuz ded wrong, un my sd-
wise wuz Bill kawled on the CURL IN
went ar hur sumeth.ng on this style:
Say. yu're a purity thing
She blusht I'm smiled, un he felt that
he Wuz just a-sailing.
''Un what's the youse OF hole lot OF
-nonkey-doodls tawiking about il. I'm
stuck on you, IN yu're stuck on me-
She CRU kline of pale IN backed out.
'Now, what's the youse" Bill went on
why be backward about il? Yu luv me
IN that ought to settle It I'm the best
man In this humanity. l can stand fifty
yards of un put your eye out with r.
calbur in my left hand.
She kline OF looked startled.
AT a hundred yards he went on. IT
can take a rife IN cut your gzzard loose
from The rest of yure anatumy. aimos,
folded"
She kline OF screened, un hid her face
in her hands.
81 can do it, sed Bill. not seeing where
he wuZ putting hz foot in 1t. Put ME
a hundred un fifty yards away IN with
a Winchester l can knock yer knee-csps
OH IN -FOUR chances.
Then she turned un left the room weep
ing. Bill waited few minutes un kun
bak to me fur sympathy.
to!e him agen that he must play up
his kwalities I'm not tell the poor CURL what
krack shot he wuz. He sed he cudn't
du 1t, that he wud feel Ike a monkey tell
ing bur how good he wuz wen, as matter
OF fact. he wuzn't Beside, he wuz kline
OS 80 49,
cudn't approximate good shot wuzn't the
woman fer him, ennyway.
He wud a dropped her then, but sum-
thing happuned. Young Mike Smith un
Ned Wilbur both began to koart Sally
Bill Winters sort OF regarded this az
challenge IN he wuz hot on the trail agen
in very short order. The koarting went
on, lite after mite, sumtimes the kummu-
nifty thot Mike wuz ahead; sumtimes that
Ned wuz, but Bill. who, when ne kawled,
just set around un kept his mouth shut,
wuz all the time a losing ground
One night the thing kahn 10 crisis.
After he had sit around anvil evening saying
nuthing, Bill got up to so ur vousual
made an engagement fer anut' .-sl.
But she sed she cudn't allow II $50 re-
that evening. This made Bill ra1 -
ups un seq:
THE first time I kahn her
what / cud do with gun 5un
appreshiate that Since then
mouth shut. 1 am now goi o Us,
sUmthing else. ! am the most benevo-
lent man in this kummunity; am kind.
coifsiderate un awl that
She kline of smiled family Ike she wuz
Altered of him, I'm then she seq:
How am 1 10 know it?"
"Youi find IL out" he sed savagely. 81
am. Mike un Ned are both sons-of-gu
I'm you'll find 1t OUT
This Sally didn't know mulch about, uu
hiz wurds kline Of impressed her, but she
didn't say ennything.
Tn he. seeing that he he'd failed. Civ
up the fife I'm quit.
Two days after that there kahn into the
toun a fellow in a buggy with two big
valises un he stuck up in all the winders
s.nes reeding: Professor Musco. the great |
phrenologst, will tonite at GaIloway's
Hal CHS written in) reveal the mystic /
secrets of the mind. Come one. Come |
all. Admission twenty-five cents Chil-
dren fifteen
We awl went to Musco's show. He ex-
amined everybody's head almost. un at |
last he fixt his eye on Ned Wilbur. one !
OF Bits rivals, IN brought him up on the |
stage un felt his head. clawing ali |
through his hair un saying in a big voice: I
II find very small pa riot.sm; 10 the rite /
Of the frontal ridge under the left suture /
l see a depression which make. me think /
that this yung man mite steal; that bump /.
there is acquisitiveness. II is quite large; /
here IS philoprogenitiveness. very small; I
murder back OF the ear here very large;
- T.,fx IT.
tu hurt ennybody's feelings. but wud al I
wise the parints Of this yung man to watch I
him. IN try 10 bring him out OF his evil 4
v avs"
Ned left the stage blushins red. The
audience wuz desthly still.
Then Musco motions Mike Smith TO set
W on the stage. Nike had escorted Sally
10 the hawl. un she, giggnng. tells him 10
90 up or the stage Tn Re goes.
Tn mebbe that Musco didn't roast him
He cIawed his head un sed he Mud steal
Chickens: murder has own grandmother. VI
peat a wife black un blue bSoar he he'd
been married week. Then the sud.enz
afed. coz Mike red got = az bad as Ned
Then Musco caWled Bill Winters W on
he stage. IN everybody snickered. ccE
hey kroad that IL he roasted Bill that
way. there wud be a riot. Wen. B.l Sc.
Town Ut Musco claws MS bumps. Rite I
rom the tIcsi he began:
Ladies and gentlemen. ] am surprised I
n my travels n tbs kuDf-y IN Yourope
nav feit 9ss beds IL asl. Including awl
he royalty OF InzIard az wei az aRl the
residents since Buchanan II ! van. 70
sy here tost tins he'd. TOW under ,nxps--
ion. IN b-loz ging &c a gentleman who
have not the honor % knowing py Main.
: me most perfectly developed % envy
ed I ever ecxSzm.ned Here = beuev-
Sence. charity. love " home. Kindness r.
CHOW man. Hberzlty- Why. tbs Esd. IA
.sss and gentlemen. : just a ser-es % nag