The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1897-06-06
FOR FEMININE READERS
DUTY TO A HOSTESS TOO OFTEN FOR
GOTTEN BY YOUNG GUESTS.
Careful Thought as Needful In House
Furnishing as i'm Personal Adorn-
ment-The Maids Rights.

1t seems point left out in the culture
and education of many clever and accom-
plished women, says a writer in the New
York Post that the power they have 10
give pleasure entails responsibility, and
that it is the most deep-roeted selfishness
To refuse to add their quota to thet general
fund of enjoyment in any household gath
cred under hospitable roof. / have seen
the most gracious and thoughtful hostess
try for an entire evening to persuade a
guest to sing or play, without gaining her
point some half laughing and wholly insin-
cere refusal, such as "Oh I am sure they
don't want to hear me-" or 20, do excuse
me- am so out of practice" sufficing to
relieve the young woman's mind from any
sense of obligation to reciprocate the con-
slant flow of thoughtful kindness which
was making every hour delightful. Some
times a brief time occupied by delightful
music will relieve a hostess from much anx-
iety about an intractable or uncomfortable
man whom she has been vainly endeavor-
ing TO draw into some pleasant relations
with his fellow-guests. The cheerful, grac-
ious readiness of a winning, attractive
young performer, giving expression with
voice or fingers to inspiriting music, makes
at once wholly impersonal nucleus for
the gathering of a large circle, and breaks
up the stiffness of one too small for easy
division. 1t seems as if so patent a bit of
fair play, to say nothing of good breeding
would not need to be spoken of, yet 1 have
known fine pianists purposely leave all
their music at home lest they should be
asked TO play, and women with charming
voices affect hOarsenesS and colds rather
than spend half an hour in delighting their
fellow-guests and obligating their hostess.
A hot IL Il Il
sweetness to the gathering of which we
form a part, every effort we can make to in
crease the delights we find prepared for our
coming is our duty as fully and plainly as
that we should otherwise do unto others as
we would that they should do unto us If
II Is IN our happy gift to be brilliant in
conversation, or skillful at games or en-
tranclng at the piano we can readily find,
after the first day or two of our soJourn, the
weak point in the armor of our hostess, and
forthwith try to protect it. 1t NAV be the
listening to the long stories of an inveterate
talker, which exhaust her patience and we
can lend our yet untired ears; it maybe the
annoyance Of two contradictory argumenta-
1--WE people whom your skill can keep apart;
1t may be the cheering of some Respondent
person, who is as shadow of a cloud wher-
ever she appears; 1t may be the helping at
the writing of invitations and duty notes.
which is the neVer-ending sequence of the
arrival of the morning mail; it may be the
MOWERS for which no one of the household
proper has gift; it may be carrying the
thoughts of the tired host far from the re-
suits of a weary day on the wings of a
charming song. Endless are the ways end
less the opportunities.
may perhaps venture so far as to say
that 1t seems due to ones self as a hostess
TO drop certain young men from our WISH
tors list, viz, those who are dancing men
ana Will not dance. or who In any such way
show utter disregard of our wishes. 1t is
by no means rare thing for a man calmly
TO refuse an Introduction to q dull or awk-
ward girl. for whose neglected loneliness
the lady who is entertaining him s heartily
sorry or to shirk any uninteresting duty by
which q party of a night or week might
be made more successful. Any such evil
dence of selfish discourc asy or of the neg
lect of proper recognition to his hostess
after longer or a shorter invitation to
her house, ought to close the door upon
young man firmly