The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1897-10-14
JOKE ON ARTEMUS WARD.
The Eumorist Got the Worst of It in
Bit of Horseplay.

The Bookman has an interesting ar
ticle on Artemus Ward, dealing at
considerable length with his eXperien-
ces in London. When he made his first
appearance in that city he enriched his
programmes with a note explaining
that he would call on citizens at their
residences and explain any jokes that
they did not understand, and it is said
that there was reason enough in such
an offer. in view of the fact that John
Bright, the eminent statesman, was re-
ported to have remarked, after attend
ing one of the humorist's perform
ances;
q must say can't see what people
find to enjoy in this lecture. The in
formation is meager, and is presented
in a desultory, disconnected manner
In fact. can't help seriously question
ing some of the statements"
Artemus Ward was fond of telling
stories and jokes at his own expense,
and he had habit when upon the
lecture platform of purposely making
people laugh at his own awltwardness,
but he had one experience that he
never referred to. During a part of the
time that he lived in Cleveland he
lived at d fashionable boarding house
on Seneca street, and was in the habit
of cutting up all sorts of capers there,
to the amusement, sometimes, but as
often to the CONSERVATION Of the other
boarders, most of whom looked upon
! him as a half baked fool"
One of his fayorite jokes was to scare
women nearly to death by pretending
to fall downstairs. The parlor where
! the boarders congregated was con-
nected by q large arch with the hail.
where the stairway was, practically
1 making one big room of both. Every
/ time a new boarder or a stranger hap
! pened to be present, Mr. Browne, as
! he was known around the house, would
] cough. at the top of the stairway, to
attract attention, then pretend to trip
/ or something, and go tumbling head
! long downward, always managing to
catch the railing and thus escape in
( jury. The women would, of course, yell
and make a great fuss over MIN when
! he picked himself up, and ne would
! generally manage to get off some droll
! remark that would set everybody
/ laughing.
/ But this sort of thing got tiresome
after awhile, and one day some of the
men boarders decided 10 stop it. A
young woman had Just arrived at the
/ house. and il was f0regone conclu-
( sion that Browne would take his
( customary tumble at the first oppor-
( tunity So, promising the landlady
/ that they would have things properly
| repaired after the trouble was over,
the joker's enemies sawed the spindles
in the balustrade almost in two, Ieay-
! ing the rail so that slight wrench
would break it loose.
That evening all the boarders congre-
gated in the parlor, the newly arrived
young woman, who had been let into
! the secret. among them. They didn't
have long to wait for their victim In
( passing up to his room, Browne saw
/ that a stranger was present. and.
after making his toilet he started to
go down stairs. lie coughed loudly
I several times while passing through the
upper hall, and then. when he saw that
everybody was looking at him,
( stumbled and shot out into the air.
But when he grasped the rail of the
/ balustrade there was a sharp crack.
| followed by crash. and the man who
afterward became famous as A Ward
/ lay stunned at the bottom of the stairs,
with a skinned elbow and bleeding
nose.
That ended the stairway joke. and
! Browne soon moved to another board
! ing house.