davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
TOO, MUCH ooLuMBus.

MONDAY last, when Col. Sage Green,
lvI Of this town, departed for Pilot
Hill to deliver speech to the citizens
of that town in the interests of a new
railroad, we warned him to begin and
end with the railroad and not wander
off TO Christopher Columbus, as we
knew he would be quite apt TO do. The
colonel has lecture on Columbus, and
while never yet invited to deliver it as
whole he Is always seeking to work
in few chapters under some other
head. We know the Pilot Hill people
like g. book. They can stand good
deal of Gen. Jackson and William
Shakespeare, but they are down on
Christopher Columbus and George
Washington. The colonel thanked us
for our caution and rode gayly away,
and that evening he had an audience to
make him proud. He began on the
railroad all right, but vanity soon
switched him Off on Columbus, and
three minutes later he was flying for
his life. He reached here Wednesday,
after lying in the woods SO hours,
and more lonesome and bedra ggled
object was never seen. His first act
was to tear up his address on Columbus,
and his next to get drunk, and we have
strong hopes that he will get some
sense into his head as he sobers up
Every town has its idioms, and they
should be respected. Here at Givea-
dam Gulch we are down on Shake
speare and up on Columbus, but if the
Pilot Hill people are the other way
their feelings should be consulted ia
stead OF outraged.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21


irg OF cniioren- nitnerIo we nave re-
garded fretfulness. melancholy and
bad temper as the natural concomitapts
Of Illness. But modern science shows
that these mental moods have actual
power TO produce disease No doubt in
most cases imperfect bodily conditions
are the cause of irritable and depressed
feelings, yet sometimes the reverse 10
true. and better knowledge of physio-
logical laws would show them to be
affect rather than cause. The fact that
disseminated and gloomy people are
never in good health Is an argument in
favor Of the theory that continual Ia
diligence in unhappy thoughts acts as
poison and creates some form Of dis
ease.-Detroit Free Press
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
POSSUM SKETCHES.
Zeb White Tells About q Little
Family Row.
Copyright, lfr J
''HMIN il curious critters" said
WV the Old 'r,ossrm hunfer Of Ten.

ihlN 10 CURIOUS cIlIects, S44o
wv the old 'possum hunter of Ten
Dessee one evening as we sat before the
big fireplace and smoked our pipes.
nodded my head 10 show that a.
scented, and he continued:
"My ole woman will run along as
slick as grease fur two or three months.
and then all of sudden she'll break
out and be as techy as wolf with a
sore paw. Mebbe it's that way with all
wimin, and mebbe that's what a man
kin expect TO put up with when be falls
in love and gifts married"
What's the story tonight asked
as the old man smoked in silence and
looked into the fire.
One time about six vars ago" BE
slowly began. at cum home from town
and found the ole woman sittil' out on
the doah-step and lookin' se rufied as
a wet hen. She was all right and ss
clipper as 70 please when 1 went
away il the mawnin', but sunthIn' had
changed her. She didn't pay no ten
shun to me as / sot down, ard !
knowed we was in fur row. ] didn't
say uuthiu' fur long time. but jes;
chawed terbacker and looked across
the road al q rabbit hoppin' about
Bimeby, softly SEE:
lisa noverful rlaasant eayaaiz,.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

We anarchists" said the apostle
"hold that no man he's a right to die
tate the conduct Of another man."
How about a woman having the
right 10 dictator" asked the student.
20, well, 1 suppose, theoretically she
has no right, either, but she viii do il
just the same. We acknowledge the
laws of nature. and that is one of them
-Ciuciprati Epous-ar
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

That was . very inhuman rscspticQ
Henderson gave the tramp who sallsd
there for bite to eat yesterday. wants
it?"
at hadn't heard Of it. What did he
do?"
Got out one Of his wifsS hiscuiss,
and"
Surely he didn't feed II 70 90 psos
fellow7'
mo: he lift him with it%Csvsland
Leader
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
In HuaafA

Tell You what ID H." sssd ~ -
turned tourist you csnt be SeessarU
full in Europe"
"Why?"
'In ST. Petersburg my vita remarked
TO q friend that she'd give ns . eosd
blowing up when abe met me-, end thsy
arrested her for q nihilist. --Phiiadsi-
phia North American.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
The ArizoDu Kicker.
Comments CD Various Subjects by the
Breezy Editor.
Copyright. 1879

"Heah. boy, bring Majah Hillson- q
glass"
A glass of water was brought out and
placed on the table at the ma or's elbow
He carefully inspected it for a long
minute. and then looked around at the
other glasses. Then he lifted his glass
and said:
Capt. Chisholm, the contents of this
glass seem to me to be water-rothing
but water"
"Jest plain water. sah," replied cap
tain.
"And yo' ar drinking plain water
yo'rself?"
81 am, sab"
"And these other gentlemen-they
nre drinking plain water?"
"Jest plain water, majah."
Capt. Chisholm" said the major,
as he put down his glass and rose to
his feet, sis there report to the eff
feet that the cotton crop has failed?"
''Not that have heard of, sah Cot
ton crop seems to be all right. majah.'
HAS the state of Alabama repudi-
ated her state obligations?"
Not that / know off,
Anything wrong with corn, oats,
peanuts and tobacco?" continued the
major.
Nothing wrong, sah-not that I've
heard Of" answered the captain. "Do
20, suspect anything wrong, majah 2"
Eyes. sab, do"
"And will yo' kindly explain?"
''I will. sab. When find Capt. CHS
holm, a true son of the south, drinking
plain water, out OF plain glass, sur.
.C-InrTyri " d MUD VINO arc aIso drink
ing plain water, out of plain glasses, it
strikes me that the glorious south is
IN the eve of great calamity or had
better get along to the compress and do
ny business with Kurnel Skellings!
Gentlemen, excuse my abrupt depar-
ture, and yo' can divide the contents OF
his glass between yo'!"
WITHOUT ANY OBJECT.
MAYHEM the stage stopped at thu
w hotel in Wolf Run after long
days drive every passenger of us was
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
CuItsvase Cheer.

]: WAS tsEcriie s.ysng OF BarerOft.
The hi=.sriz1. ~ho WAS . vigorous Old
naz a. -. that the secret os Gag ne IA
= never losing one's temper. Tas re-
zark wa simply . coneTsfs way % sz-
pressing he hyg.eu5e vsl5s q sEoisbiii-
ty-A PTiaeipls shles. Szsy lately. AAs
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
A ChAnR

~What's the matter wild BrigRsrsr1
asked the gentleman with the rod shir<
IL thought he was always so radical h
his beliefs and wanted the money Of the
country divided up evenly. Nov he
doesn't say a word"
Because" remarked Tia nan With
tho whiskers. "his uncle has 5uss Ian
him slo.ooo."-CincinnAd Commercial
Tribune. >
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
Cruel Man.

II cried all day yesterday
what for2"
1T was our wedding anniversery.end
Henry said: 1T seems 20 me That soDe.
thing awful occurred ten years ago TO
day, but can't remember what II was
Detroit Free Press
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
The Wrong Buny

HoaH-Jones' faith in phrcnologyhaa
been shaken.
Joax-So.
Hoax-Yes; the other day q couple OF
kids were playing ball near Jones
house and the ball smashed him back OF
the head. The lump was later de
scrfbed by the phrenologist A. love OF
little children."-Philadelphia Record
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
A Warm DfscussSoa.

Mrs. barley lat breakfsstl-n vss
very late when you returned lone lass
night, George. The debate - yosr H.
srary club must have been . ~sry loas
one.
Mr.. barley (unguardediy)-Fiftes.
hot rounds-Cp-to-Dats
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
CharftesI~

~Doa'; you fhink Mr.. L~iyhy.os 10
'>arfuily affected -
wei. I'd hate % bsii~~. szcb Esar
ners were rs:rrzI.--ChIeaSo Jogrrs1
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
LOOKED LIKE A CALAMITY.

THERE were five or six of us on the
hotel veranda. and when Mai. Hill
BON was seen coming up the street a
boy was ordered 10 bring out glass
Of water for every sitter. We were sip
ping the beverage when the major halt
ed at the steps and looked up. and
Capt. Chisholm. who was the only one
who knew him. called ont:
"Mawnin' TO yo', maiah-I hope see
20 weli?"
"Mawnin', captain" was the reply
smawnin' to all"
Its hottish day. majah.- CONTINUED
the captain as he raised his glass.
YES, rather hottish," replied the
major. as he peered at the glasses and
puzzled look came over his face
Won't yo' come up and join us?"
'T was going over TO the compress,
but am in no powerful hurry"
The major came up the steps. was
introduced TO each of us in turn. and
1is he sat down the captain said TO the
SouEg nero:
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
kfruck OnA.

"Oh, Jack. I am 30 terrified whaS
there IL lightning"
Get under the bed and n WIN nsvss
touch you"
"But we have folding beta."
VERY thing. Chance for yel 10 shui
pp."-N. y. Truth.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
Didn't Notice Her Particui.rIy.

Mr.. Mann-Did you see that woman
Just as we crossed over?
Mrs. Mann-You mean the woman II
the camePs-hair gown and beaver jack
ct; the one who had on bronze shoes
q hat trimmed with fuchsias and hello
trope, with pink ribbons and chiffor
veil? No, 1 didn't notice her in par
ticular. What were you going 20 ssJ
bout her ?-Boston.T ea0naxln
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
Not Ffr.t-CIas, In,

Yes" he said proudly. I'm self
made man"
Too bed you couldn't have had .
Ettle more practice before -ackIins tie
joo, isn't ii?" remarked the lazy man
In the corner.-Chicsgo Post.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
Keeninx Arrnunf-

Average Wife-Ay dear. aren't yot
going 20 church with ne this Sunday
Average Hrsba16-Good lands Why
I went 20 church with you last Sunday
y. y. Weeklr.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
MAJ. sHOTwELL IS sNUBBED BY A
BEAR.

N|E HAVE on several occasions an
w nounced our belief that Maj.
ShotweH was the meanest critter in all
Arizona, and something happened the
other day to corroborate all we have
said. The major was on his way to
Lone Pine, to dodge his creditors in
this town for awhile, when be ran slap
up against a cinnamon bear at the
crossing of Dog Creek. The bear was
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

Philanthropio Caller "a jsiD - M
friend. have you any reiigiou csnsis.
tons?
Avery Baddup-well. reckon th1on
what you rntghs call EN-. vas seni
hero fur robbin' church.--Ca1oar
Tribune.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
A way Wom~a Haw~

you've got me charged With 90
Of cigsrs On the eth inst that dkkanr
have" said the customer.
''on the 18th. did you say7s replied
tho cigar dealer; "Oh, yes, yva had
'em. Those are the ones your wife gave
you for your b;rthday."-Yonksss
Statesman.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
A PARTING.

Penelope-Their engagement created
quite a sensation, but I believe that
some cruel misunderstanding parted
them.
MArie-Yes; be understood that he,
father was wealthy.-Broohlyn Life.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

People who I've In gt&<s heussa
sisonldn't ibT0Ts Stones"
why
"BeczENe s-sryboSy can zee thsz "a
t---Dstroi: Free Press
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

Mlnsstsr-win yoa take Ills rss fo
better OF for worge?
Brice-How DO kDo~r Thst's vhsA
Tn marrying him for. 70 spd 07t."-x
\. Journal
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

-ETs-ythirg o. ear;b kss ia rss.-
How s5osi the Cslisorssa peach
Il, Las ia uH-. I:'s good 20 sssl--
CElesz1 Trfbzns
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
c-rsIn.neiixhr

There is cns thing which grzfises
woman rzore than all things else"
~And whs; IA fhz.y"
-B~ing told that other women a.,
jealous OK her.~-Eisicsgo R-cord-
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
inst what sb. w.nted.

Teddy Thoughtless-Do you-sw-
think Miss Highly would mahry me
don't you know?
Charley Colddeal-I think SO. Iheard
her say she was looking for a soft thing
N. Y. Journal.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
Strange,

He-Think of our meeting after AZ
this Grae'
She-Yes- And isnr 10 odd that ws
should both meet at the same ttme7-
Ip-to-Date
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
Had sone Motive. Of ce.r...

M BeilOws-I believe yoG married
ne for nv money.
Bello~s-A-hsm! Wen. I certainly
didn't 70 20 the aliar for ny health
y. i. Journal.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
Hfa Frulf.

The frost has quit the prnnpxfns
To invade the water pipe.
And the plumber Is admonished
That the plumbs are almost ripe.
Detroit Journal
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

Mr. Tupenny-I gave up grea. eeA
when ! married you
Tupeuny-That may be. but you hs-.
never given up anything sirce.-Towr
Tonnes
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
All Hone C,.s.

Miss Perkinson-Ah. there 10 - mar
rying or giving IN marriage Ia Hssvsn-
Miss Wsstlske--weli. dear. yoz kses
you have ny synpstby>-Esiesso Res
ord
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

Her Frthsr-l suppose. yoanr 1sa
yosr iafse'ioss z-r of tie D<ss7
Her SUifor-sF ~ss-~r-i irfsr1 -
Ea1rTT Tour tsBz afer,-S. y. sosrssL
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
Ok man Wbu Didn't az.
socrrT4sat ~s

HALF an hour before the train 20.
CheJ enne was due q roughly-eiad
man with z rife on his shoulder and two
reyoivers in his belt entered the depo.
at Wharton and said 10 the ,ckei
AGENT.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
AN EXCITING ADVENTURE.

A WEEK or so ago an old critter
n named Carson came down from
The mountains TO get dEak and have .
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
GEsERoSrTY.

Willie (wbo has eaten his piece Of osks
a. fssi an possibls Say! Ethel: Iett
play mensgeri.- I'll Be the MONKEY
aud you feed me with your eske<-S. T.
Tiuea
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

Grandpa, what h pesoemaksr7'
We'll. peaceznaker 10 . man vh<
jumps In 20 prevent two other nea from
fighting. and comes QUA win more
bruises and black eyes than dtber II
tbem-"-Iouisviiis Cour1er-JournaL
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
They Leave Her Alone.
ID what n that przy7

He-There is one thing have sfwsu
noticed.
she-And what n that pr~y7
That the woman who Is always pick
ing at The men Is the one the men never
pick-"-Yonkers Statesman.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

You should not Be f-sf on haSl,
Unless you vordd 10 osss1;
The early bird may get ths vorm :
But the early worm gets sstsa-
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21
NOT THAT KIND.

NTHEN Mr.. John Graham, of Chi
wv cago. arrived here last week 10
see about introducing electric light
ing for the public streets we plainly
told him that we Gidn't believe our peo-
pie would stand it Tallow candles and
kerosene oil have been used ever since
the first light was hung out, and nc
one has ever heard any complaints.
Mr.. Graham decided to give an exhibit
ton of his arc light and let the people
judge for themselves, and the display
took place Wedn esday evening in front
of the city hall. The boys were SO quiet
for the first five minutes that we began
to be hopeful, but then old Jim Hew-
son began TO yell and away she went.
1t seemed as if so pistols were popping
at once, and of course il didn't take
long for that arc light to grow wings
and fly away. When it had disappeared
Che boys turned their attention 10 Mr..
Graham, and the last we heard of him
~ was seven miles west of the town
and still on the 60. We trust he is sat
tstied with his experiment. Our peo-
pie didn't mean him any harm. but
It's just their way. Wen be in the
twin with Chicago some day. but just
IT present our affection for candles and
kerosene is too strong 10 be broken by
lny sudden wrench.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

WITHOUT ANY OBJECT.
MAYHEM the stage stopped at thu
wv hotel in Wolf Run after a long
days drive every passenger of us was
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1897-11-21

hungry enough TO eat grass, anu me
major was so frightened that he made
no effort to get away, and yet there
was no tragedy. The bear sized him
up, rolled him over two or three times,
and then walked off in disgust. He
didn't propose to lower the reputation
of the Bruin family by eating any
such specimen of humanity. We have
been told that the major took it as a
snub and feels very much cut mp over
il, and we are glad of it. He is a sleek,
slick liar, professional dead-beat, and
no decent coyote would howl over his
grave if he were dead.
The oasis., 1897-01-16

Yesterday evening Governor and Mrs. Thornton of New Mexico, passed Nogales returning home from their visit in Sonora. His excellency was much improved in health as a result of his short sojourn at Hermosillo and Guaymas.
The oasis., 1897-01-16

For pain in the chest piece of flannel dampened with Chamberlain's Pain Balm and bound over the seat of the pain, and another on the back be- tween shoulders, will afford prompt relief. This is especially valuable in cases where the pain is caused by cold and there is tendency toward pneumonia. For sale by Chenoweth & Mix.
 Reverend J. Gheldof of Yuma, has been appointed to the charge of the Catholic parish at Nogales, and is ex- pected to arrive this morning. He will be permanently located here, and bis parish will include southern Pima county-Eogales, Gro Blanco, Ari- vaca, Tubac, Calabasas, Harshaw and Crittenden.
The oasis., 1897-01-16
MORALES NOTES
Mexican Dollars. 5l O 51i.

Thursday evening MT A. bieS0Oi returned from Guaymas.
 Monday Doctor F. H. Wclles went out to Washington Camp.
 Aleiandro Ramirez returned to the City of Mexico last Sunday.
 Wednesday Mrs. J. Woodrum re- turned from ysit.in the east. F A little child of MT. A. Biester was reported quite iii on Wednesday
 Tuesday evening MT. and Mrs. Geo. B. Marsh returned from Gnaymas.
 Wednesday evening Captain Allen Mcintyre returned.from Ilermosillo.
 Jack Faulds was mp from Magdalena early this week. He returned Tues day.
 Mrs. John w. Roberts is reported very i'll. Doctor pusdy is attending her.
 Send your orders for fresh fish and oysters to Franco Bros, Nogales, So- nora.
 Sunday and Monday Mr. D. A. San ford Of Sonoita, was visitor at No gales.
 About GOO head of Sonora cattle were crossed over the line at Buena Vista last week.
 Fresh Yaqul Rlveroysters and fresh fish received daily by Franco Bros, Nogales, Sonora.
 Itis rumored that the X Ray roker cluh caught 2 sucker Sunday; but he turned out pike
 Tuesday MT O. K. Franklin went to nermosillo on business, to be gone week or ten days.
 Last week Mr Cirilo Ramirez went to Monterey, to bring home his sister who is visiting there.
 Sunday night Marshal James Speedy came up from Guaymas, arriving with the Sonora railway pay car.
 Wednesday evening MT. R. Johnson, master mechanic of the Sonora rail- way came up from Guaymas.
 Wednesday Enrique Ullmann went out to Las Planchas to enter the sery- ice of the Planchas Mining Co.
 Wednesday evening MT. ". c. Budge of Phoenix, who went south a week ago, returned from Guaymas.
 The Nogales lodge of K. of F. vii give a grand masquerade ball some time during the month of February
 Monday Mr Wm. Breckenridge, the Southern Pacific detective, was at No gales on route into Sonora on business
 Yesterday MT. Jos. Thompson came up from Minas Prietas for short visit. He will return today or to- morrow.
 Yesterday Rev Father Bezamot came from Benson with Rev. Father Gehldof to induct the latter into his new charge.
 The many friends of Mrs. Breen, who has been very ill couple weeks, will be pleased to learn that she is recovering.
 For fresh and salted meats of every description, sausage, head cheese, and other delicacies, go to Charley Beck's new meat market.
 Sunday evening rainstorm set ia and has continued ever since with very little cessation. Two or three times the sky cleared, but not long.
 The subject of Rev. s. V. Dilley's discourse tomorrow morning at the American Methodist church will be "Loye and Obedience. Evening sub ject The Way to Success"
The oasis., 1897-01-16

MT. L. Horvilleur of La Moda, has recently received at Guaymas, by sail ing vessel directly from France, con- signment of ,600 cases of groceries, wines, liquors. etc., which is now en route to Nogales. While awaiting completion of his new building they will be stored ln the Tourniel building opposite the depot and adjoining the Hotel Cazabon.
The oasis., 1897-01-16

Col. Robert Williams is continually adding to his improvements at the Montezuma hotel, and has made that well known hostelFy as comfortable and homelike caravansery as will be found anywhere in the United States. The widely known mild and pleasant climate has made Nogales justly noted as summer and winter resort. Col. Williams gives those coming to enjoy the climate an elegant stopping place.