davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1897-08-19

RUssIA's PICKPOCKETs.-One day,
says Hdrper's Round Table, while
dining together, the French ambas.
sador and a grand duke of Russia
were discussing the cleverness of the
pickpOckets Of their respective coun-
tries.
The grand-duke claimed that the
Russian pickpocket was the more
skillful. Seeing the ambassador IN
credulous, he told him he would,
without knowing it, be relieved of
his watch before leaving the table.
He then telephOned to the head of
the police to send at once the clev.
crest pickpocket he could lay his
hands on.
The man came and was put into
livery, and told to wait at the table
with the other servants. He was "a
give the grand duke a sign directly
he had done the trick.
But this was not given very soon,
for the ambassador was very wary
and always kept on the alert, and
held his hand on the fob, even wher
conversing with the most distin
guished guests.
AT last tho grand duke received
the signal. He at once requested the
ambassador to tell him the time
The latter triumphantly put his hanC
to his pocket and pulled out potato
instead of his watch.
To conceal his feelings he wOulC
take pinch Of snuff-his snuff bo,
was gone. Then he missed his rins
from his finger, and his gold tooth
pick, which he had been holding il
Ms hand in its little case.
Amid the hilarity of the guest
the sham lackey was requested to re
store the articles, but the grand duke
merriment was changed into alarm
and surprise when the thief produce,
two watches, two rings, two snui
boxes, etc.
His imperial Highness then mad
the discovery that he himself ha
been robbed at the same time tina
the French ambassador had bee
despoiled so craftily.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1897-08-19

IT MADE HIM HOMEsICK.- The
burglar had entered tho house as
quietly as possible. but his shoes
were not padded, and they made
some noise.
He had jnst reached the door of
the bedroom when he heard some one
moving in the bed, as if about to
get up, and he paused.
The sound Of woman's voice
tiOated to his ears.
If you don't take off your boots
when you come into this house." it
said, "there's going to be trouble,
and whole lot of it. Here it's been
raining for three hours, and you dare
to tramp over my carpets with your
muddy boots on. Go down stairs and
take them off this minute.n
He went down stairs without a
word, but he didn't take off his
boots. Instead he went straight out
into the night again, and the "pal''
who was waiting for him saw a tear
glisten in his eye.
l." can't rob that house," he said
at reminds me of home"
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1897-08-19

You may say that you have got
religion in your heart. Well, I'd
want 1t in my head, sure, if l could
not have it in any other place.
Heavens way the other side of
shoutin'. After you get through
shoutin' there's heap of work be-
fore you get to Heaven.
It's easier climbing up a tall tree
than it is to fall down from it. You
don't think so, bud? Well, try it..
There amt one fellow i'm tens got
sense enough to see all around the
thing.
It's easier to tell the truth than lie.
When you drop lie you have to go
back the next day to see how it's get
ting on.
When man who's been drinking
says he was overtaken by fault, ,
that's lie. The jug will never
oVertake you, brother. You've got
to run after it to get it.
If you don't try to go to Heaven
harder than you try to pay your
debts, bud, you're going where wa
ter is scarce.
In Indiana they jumped on me be-
cause down in Georgia we are said
to use Shotguns at elections. | lust
told them that they had found it
cheaper to buy votes where we
thought best to kill.
y man that buys vote will sell a
vote. And man who sells vote
sells principle, for a vote stands
for principle. And man who
sells a principle will sell anything
this side Of Heaven and hell TO get
office. That's logic that drives YOU
in hole and drives the bung-stop-
per in on top.
| preach like L think. Most
preachers think as they preach
The difference is as wide as from the
East to the West.
If fellow loves the truth and
breaches the truth, the truth will
not only take care Of itself, but the
fellow that breaches it.
Character has got to have a foun-
dation. Heaven has foundation.
but hell is bottomless.
There are some fellows who are
good because they want to get to
Heaven. If they get there, they
will have no motive any longer, and
If there's low place in the fence of
glory they will want to jump out
A motiveless man is o failure i'm
Heaven and earth.
If you ever see fellow who saws
there is no hell, you can be sure that
he feels he's going to get there.
Pm going to end my lecture here.
My talks are like freight trains
You can break them anywhere you
want, stick on caboose, and send
them off separate.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1897-08-19

VISITING SIsTER-Why were you
so cross to your husband at break.
fast ?
Wife, just couldn't help it. /
felt as ! must scold at somebody or
burst. Just physical irritabiiity,
you know - and tnen everything
went wrong. Breakfast was late,
the steak burnt, the coffee thin and
cakes heavy.
Then why didn't you scold the
cooks"
Oh, | cOuldn't-she'd leaye,n
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1897-08-19

THERE Is nothing more trouble
some to good mind than to dc
nothing.
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1897-08-19
NUMBER 13.

a BoTToMLEsS LAKE.-In County
Sligo there is a small lake renowned
for its fabulous depth. \ professor
happened to be in that part of Ire
land last summer, and started out
one day for a ramble among the
mountains, accompanied by a native
guide. As they climbed, Pat asked
him if he would like to see this lake,
I" for it's no bottom at all, SORT"
"But how do you know that, Pat ?"
We'll, sorr, I'll tell ye; me own
cousin was showin' the pond to
gentleman one day, sorr, and he
looked incredulous like, just as you
do, and me cousin couldn't stand it
for him to doubt his word, sOrr, and
so he said, 'Begorra, I'll prove the
truth of me words > and off with
with his clothes and in he jumped"
The professors face wore an
amused and critical expression.
Yes, sorr, in he jumped, and he
didn't come up again, at all, at ALL"
But" said the professor, 81
don't see that your cousin proved
his point by recklessly drowning
himself"
Sure, Sorr, it wasn't drowned ut
all he was; the next day comes a
cable from him i'm Australia, askin'
to send on his Clothes"
Greenbrier independent. [volume] (Lewisburg, Va. [W. Va.]) 1859-1980, 1897-08-19
MISCELLANEOUS.
THE COLONEL'S PRAYER.
BY LYTTLETON PICKETT PEYTON

BY LYTTLETON PICKETT PEYTON
Our versatile young friend, Colo.
mel Peyton, has struck new gait,
which, ii kept up, will certainly
lead to fame and fortune. The Colo
mel is well known as capital story
teller, and "The Colonel's Prayer, T"
published in this paper this week, is
far and away ahead of some of the
work of many of the most noted
story-writers of the day. - Udh
State Journal, JuLy 17M.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

An old farmer once assured me that
he got rich by making it n rule to bring
away from town more money than he
took to it. and as he was not man OF
brilliant intellect it follows that any
reader OF the Farmers Voice should be
able to do as well as he did. This man
always had large truck patch, great
flock OF chickens, and kept seven or
eight cows, all on ge acres of land-a
pretty good-sized farm in the section in
which he lived. He had plenty OF
vegetables of all kinds, ferries and
fruits in profuslon for his own family
and some to spare. His surplus was all
sold in town of less than 1, 900 people.
and the demand for what he had to sell
was always equal to the supply. for
what he offered was fresh and first.
class.
A great many men think it below
their dignity to deal in such small
things. but it is the way to prosperity
and comfort, and this man was as high
ly respected, and his sons and dauph-
ters were given as good an education
as the best schools could afford, and to.
day hold high positions in their social
world, every one of them having COM
Portable home, and all is traceable to
the thrift of their father Too many
farmers do not stop to consider that it
is better to sell their surplus of "truck"
at the wholesale price than to buy
things they could produce on their own
farms at the retail price.
The farmer who does not have an or.
chard and berries and grapes in plen-
ty, and good, large garden, is not
living up to his privileges, and is losing
most of the benefits that may be de-
rived from a life in the country
Farmers Vo;oo
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19


Thegrave of Thomas Watt at Bryant's
chapel, near Centerville, Ind, was bur
rowed into by ground hogs and several
of his bones dragged to the surface.
The discovery of the above facts makes
interesting prophecy uttered years
ago. Thomas Watt was the neighbor-
hood drunkard. His children ran wild
as colts and but little more clothed
His worthlessness and deprayitv
aroused the indignation of his
neighbors, and particularly of an
old woman, who, it is said, had the
gift of divination. She demonstrated
with him, and upon his failure to heed
her advice pronounced a curse upon
him. She prophesied that he would die
of violence and his bones would nc. find
repose in the grave. Thomas Watt was
drowned while in an intoxicated cond;-
ton in attempting to cross swollen
stream. Now that the latter part of the
dismal prophecy has received literal
fullfillment the old woman, who is vet
alive and in the divination business. IL
greatly feared and her power as for.
tune teller receives much credenee,-
Chicago News = &
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19
SCIENCE AND INDUSTRY.

Certain female insects live Ga times
a long as the male. The females of beec
and ants are longer lived than the
males.
DIR. School, the German hydrog-
rapher, says that there are not less
than 10000 tons of mineral matter per
day added to the store which the ocean
already holds in solution.
The Yale lock manufacturers have
proved that in a patent lock having
six steps," each capable of being re-
duced in height 20 times, the number of
changes or combinations will be Sc, 400.
Equal parts of lime water and
sweet oil well mixed will form a kind of
soap which is very efficacious in taking
out or removing inflammation, as well
as for healing wounds caused by burns
or scalds. 8
The increase of urban populations
Is one of the most important social
conditions brought out by successive
ccnsuses. In England 71.7 per cent. of
the population were in urban districts
In 1891, an increase of 1873 per cent. in
decade, as against an increase of "a
per cent. in rural population. The bal
ence of civil power has gone to the bor-
oughs.
The deepest body of fresh water in
America is Crater lake, Oregon. Only
one lake in the world, Lake Baikal, ex-
ceeds 1t in depth, and it is only 400 feet
deeper. Until recently it was asserted
Crater lake was bottomless, but sound
ings have shown its great depth to be
1000 feet. 1t is FIVE miles in diameter,
nearly circular, and occupies the crater
of an extinct volcano.
Cultivate the habit of breathing
through the nose and taking deep
breaths. If this habit was universal,
there u little doubt that pulmonary
affections would be decreased one-haif.
An English physician calls attention
to this fact, that deep and forced res
pirations win keep the entire body
in q glow in the coolest weather, no
matter how thinly one may be clad.
He was himself half frozen TO death
one night and began taking deep
b-eaths and keeping the air in his
lungs as long as possible. The result
was that he was thoroughly comfort.
able in few minutes.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19
THE TURK AS A FIGHTER.
He VIII Run When He Thinks He Il
Getting whipped.

Getting whipped.
Col. Francis V. Greene, L. S. A., re-
tired, who was sent by this government
to Russia during the last Turkish war
to represent the war department at
Washington, lately told of his observa-
tons of the Turkish army while in bat
tie. 1.-The Turks are individually good
fighters" said Col. Greene. "They
are fine soldiers, very obedient, fanatic
in their religion and fatalists. The
Turk fights up to certain point and
when ~he thinks matters are going
against him, he will run. Not for any
lack of courage, but because he thinks
fate is against him. The Turkish sol
diers are well armed. During the Russo
Turkish war, the Turks were better
armed than the Russians. They are
we'll clothed, but the commissary and
transportation systems were fatally de-
fective.
I'm numbers the peace strength is
$4,000 Greeks and 10000 Turks, and
these can probably be increased to
three times as many on each side. In
1877, the Turk put over 100000 men in
the field in Europe and over 100000 in
Asia, and they made a very much
stronger resistance than the Russians
anticipated. think Russia put nearly
half million men In the field before the
war was over.
Turkey is bankrupt, but so she was
in 1877. and that won't stop her from
fighting. They viii probably manage
'to-borrow enough money to buy guns
and ammunition, and they will get food
cut of their own country. The Turks
20 years ago fought an entirely defcn-
siye campaign. No reason why they
should not do so now. Their plan was
to seize some important point and
throw up Notifications which they con-
structed with remarkable skill, and
then wait to be attacked behind their
breastworks. They collected large
amounts of ammunition and provisions
In their forts and awaited attack. Some
times their positions were burned.
They were compelled to retreat, and
then they would abandon all their am
munitions and stores and fall back on
another line of Notifications, 20 or so
miles in the rear"
Col. Greene was asked IFS opinion as
to the relative strength of the armies of
Greece and Turkey. There is no ques-
tion," he said, shat the Turks are more
than match for the Greeks. But the
whole question. is what stand the great
powers willtake. They are all extremely
anxious to keep peace, because if the
war is once started among the great
powers it is impossible to say when it
will end."-Detroit Free Press.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19
HERE AND THERE.

twill pay any farmer to read about
his business. for no matter how ex-
perienced he may be. there are MANY
things he win never learn from his own
ventures. a
Combine Bookkeeping with fruit
growing, and you can more easily pro.
cure two crops from the same land: and
this double cropping requires no addi-
tional fertilizing, is not exhaustive, de-
mands no extra blowing or cultivation,
In draining, the first expense is all
the expense, and it is a permanent in
vestment A well-laid stone drain NAV
last half century. and one of good tile
even longer. Even one of brush has
done service for ten years.
--Endeavor to plant out trees which
are not more than two years from bud
or graft. They are more easily dug.
have better roots, hold more firmly in
the ground, and start into vigorous
growth again with less check.
Don't be afraid of the poultry busi-
ness being overdone, for we are annu-
ally importing millions Of dozens of
eggs. 1t would be better if we could
export instead of import The money
would then come to us instead of us
it from home.
ITO set out a nice orchard and then
let the trees take care of themselves il
to ignore the thousand and one dangers
which are ever ready to beset orchard
trees. Let us not forget that the
primary object is to grow healthy.
strong, fruitrbearing trees.
Whenever the foot of the sheep
touches the land it is turned into gold, >
q an old proverb. Sheep husbandry
certainly makes the land NOR profEs-
productive at less expendi-
.ure than any other animal kept "a the
arm.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19
TOBACCO CULTURE.
The Soil Best Adapted for Raising Bright
Tobacco.

The Soil Best Adapted for Raising Bright
Tobacco.
The authorities agree that r soil
favorable for bright tobacco is very
different from heavy tobacco soil.
and that soil of the latter description
can not give a good light tobacco. A
bright tobacco soil con taines very little
clay and large amount of sand. The
organic matter is very low, less than
one-tenth of what is necessary for a
good heavy tobacco soil.
1t is impossible to state exactly the
reasons for these differences in soil ac-
ton. One of the principal points is
that q too free supply of moisture is
prejudicial to good bright tobacco. and
. light sandy soil does not hold water
. stsVnely - clay soil. The danger
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

The Lowest Rates Ever Made to m
Exposition I'm This Country.
The Exposition in commemoration of the
hundredth anniversary of the admission OF
Tennessee into the Union is not a local af
fair BY any means. 1t far surpasses in ex.
tent of buildings, beauty of grounds, inter.
esting exhibits and number Of both foreign
and home attractions any exhibition ever
held In this country, with the possible ex.
ception of the Columbian of 1898. Located
q It is on the main line of the Louisville &
nashville Railroad it is in the direct line
OF travel between the North and the South,
4, ana can be visited en- route with loss of but
little time. The extremely low rates that
FAYE been established make it cheaper to go
this great show, while its own attractions
Will well repay a special visit. Write Mr..
e., r. Atmore, sGen'l Pass. Agent, Louis
vile, Ky, for matter concerning it.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19
6TATs or ONO, CrTr or ToLRDo, 1.
T.nrxo 49,

Lucas CouNrr. q.
Frank j. Cheney makes oath that he IN the
senior partner of the firm of F. j. Cheney
Y Co., doing business in the city of Toledo,
County and State aforesaid, and that said
erm viii pay the sum of One Hundred Dol.
lars for each and every case of catarrh that
cannot be cured by the use of Halls Catarrh
Cure. FRANK j. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in my
1856. A. w. GTEAS0N.
SeaiI Notary Public.
Hall Catarrh Cure is taken internally and
acts directly on the blood and mucous sur
faces of the system. Send for testimonials.
free. +. j. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
Sold by druggists, 75c.
Halls Family Pills are the best.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

with bright tobacco Il a too liberal
supply fammonia, as the least ten
dency to ran1paass has q serious effect
on the quality.
Though the ammonia must be guard.
cd carefully the mineral fertilizers are
apt to be deficient In q soil of this
type the mineral fertilizers-potash
and phosphates-are apt to be in
very slightly available forms, while
the ammonia Is quickly made useful.
1t must be remembered that the tobac-
co plant has . very limited power of
foraging for food, and, as it consumes
relatively little water, the subsoil il
not reservoir of plant food.
While it is true that lipht SANDY
soil is the best for bright tobacco. il
must not be inferred that poor sandy
soil is desirable. The mineral ma
nures must be supplied literally or the
leaf made will have no substance,
The nature of the minerals supplied
is also of Importance. The potash
should be in the form of sulphate, and
comparatively free of muriates. Muri-
ates, or chlorides. seem to affect in
juriously the burning properties Of to-
bacco; an important matter with
bright tobacco. The phosphates also
are apt to carry too much useless acid.
In order to remove. these acids. the
soil should be frequently lined; but,
lime must not be used if the organic
matter is high. In such case the ann
monia would be liberated too freely
and the supply of mineral fertilizers
would be apt to be inadequate. In
deed, in this case the lime is used
merely as corrective and Is best an.
piled Immediately after the crop is re-
moved. The potash and phosphate
may also be applied very early to adj
vantage, as the loss by drainage will
be very slight.
Place no reliance on the natural sup.
plies OF mineral fertilizers in the soil.
Some plants, notably oats, seem to
have the power of foraging extensively
for potash and phosphates, but tobacco
is particularly helpless in this line. OF
the total phosphoric acid existing in
the soil naturally, about one-thiid is
available for plant food; of the total
potash, about one-twentieth. 1t is inn
portant therefore to keep these min
erals supplied rather more carefully
than in ordinary farming.
The fertilizer recommended by au-
thority contains three per cent. ammo
mia, ten percent. potash, and seven per
cent. available phosphoric acid. OF
this not less than 900 pounds should
be used PER- acre. If shere Is much
humas in the soil, lower the ammonia
to one per cent. The manuring as d.
rected in this article is necessary on
the soil described as best for bright to.
bacco, but no form of manuring will
produce bright tobacco on a heavy
clay soil, or one very rich in organic
matters. Peacock, in farmers Home
Journal.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

An Unconscious Explanation. = First
Chappie--T wonder now, Chollie. how the
donkey ever came to be used as thc--er,
emblem of Stupidity" Second Chapp;e
hoy; must have been before our day
BROOKLYN Life.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

The Old-Fashioned Way.-esWhat vs.
yer daddy lickn' You forsS asked n the b wHs
grown boy. The other half-erown bow an.
swered: 20, he was jist provin' to me that
the whale really did swaller Joner."-In-
dianapolis Journal.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

Boys who are always waiting for the hirh
est wages are generally out of a job.-Wash
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

EYES," she said to the young man, Il have
been present when you acted" .'lndced?''
think you were with an opera company.
Your voice is tenor, isn't it?" "No,p lie
answered, II guess you are thinking about
my salary."-Washingto Star.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

As ] understand it," said Mrs. Eillough-
by to her husband, "a pugiis.ic encounter
takes place between two men," THAT Is
right replied Mr.. Willoughby. .sThen
why do they say that one 'bests the other?
They should say he 'betters' him" Louis
vile Courier-Journal.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

"Er good many folks" said Uncle Eben,
seems ter go ter baseball game foh dc
pleasure OBJ hyahin' dar own voices; and a
good many. othuhs pears ter get up an
make speeches fob pcrzackly de same rea-
son. "-Washington Star.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

why do you remain all by yourself on
that side of the rack?" said tie cane to the
umbrella. '1Don't you like company"
"Oh, yes!" replied the umbrella, 81 like
company well enough, but custom seems to
have ordained that | should be loan.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

Our old clothes have lost us some friends
but not so many as our opinions about ouI
neighbors.--Ram's Horn.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

After physicians had given me up, was
saved BY Piso's Curc.-Raiph Erieg, Will
Transport, Pa, Nov. q, 1898.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

When bilious or costive eat Cascaret,
candy cathartic, cure guaranteed. l0c, Csc.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

Years of rheumatism have ended with
cure by st. Jacobs Oil. Cures promptly.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

People kick when show is too long and
also when it is too observation-disclosures Dem
ocrat.
The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1897-06-19

There are some people who never feel ricl
except when they are giving something
away.-Atchison Globe.