Santa Fe daily New Mexican., 1897-04-22
A LAZY LOVER.

mighty souls!" the patriarch cried,
flattening his nose against the grimy
window pane and peering out into the
storm. "Jest look at it a-comin down.
He'd "a know'd we was a-goin to hev
it like this, you'd "a seen me a-leavir
home-you'd "a seen me a-leavin
home'
The old man thoughtfully stroked his
bushy beard He felt that he had met
but Just retribution for coming to the
store to loaf When, an hour before, he
had awakened from a doze in his arm
chair, picked up his stout stick and
hobbled to the village, the sky was clear
and blue. Not cloud was visible any
where, and the sun was blazing down
on the fields Of yellow grain that he
overlooked from the porch of his little
house on the hill But the storm, as
storms do in that mountainous part OF
Pennsylvania, was gathering its force
unseen behind the neighboring noun
tains .piling black cloud OH black cloud,
and then, like an army charging on
sleeping enemy, it swept forth from it's
hiding place amid the flash of light
ming and the crash of thunder and del
uged the valley.
my, oh, myp' muttered the old
man. sit serves me right. I ought to
"a know'd better. Whenever I runs
down here for minutes loaf, it rains.
Never team comes along to give me
lift home an I hez to paddle back in
me leaky ole boots.
He hobbled to his chair by the empty
stove, about which were gathered the
men Of the village, despite the fact that
no fire blazed within and cold weather
was far ahead.
II hope the company hain't displeas-
in,' snapped the chronic loafer. He
knocked the ashes out Of his pipe, refill
ed and lighted it and sprawled out upon
the counter, pillowing his back against
pile Of calicoes.
mot at all, at all. It's the loafin ]
hate. l never could loaf, !" said the old
man, glancing at the prostrate form.
The chronic loafer made no reply save
a faint Huh!'
"Jest because felly sets around the
stove hain't no sign he's lazy" said the
miller warmly.
"Fur be it from me from sayin go,
boys, fur be it, said the patriarch,
stroking his beard. tBut, as I was sayin
awhile ago. I don't want to git inter nc
sech habits as Absalom Bunkel."
"Abs'l 'lom Bunkel - Bunkel-Bunk-
el?'' repeated the shoemaker, punctuat
ing his remarks with puffs Of tobacco
smoke.
"Bunkel-Bunkel?" said the store
keeper inquiringly, tapping the end OF
his nose with his pencil.
"Who the heck's Abs 'lom Bunkel?''
the loafer cried.
''Absalom Bunkel was a man as was
naturally SO lazy it was credit to him
every time he moved" the patriarch
began. "You uns knows the ole lawg
house thet stands where Big run crosses
the road over the mo o'ntain. It's all
tumbled down now. They amt no
daubin atween the lawgs. The Chin
bley's fallen; the fence hez gone, an the
lots choked up with weeds. It's for.
lorn place, but when I was u lad it
was jest about the slickest thing along
the ridge yander, That's where Absalom
Bunkel lived an his pap lived before
him. Absalom's pap was stingy man
so stingy he'd squeeze a cent tell the
1njun yelled. Consequent, when he died,
he left Absalom fortune of $700. 1t
was fortunate thing fer the son, feI
he'd much ruther "a set on the porch
a-listenin to the birds an watchin the
bees hummin over the sunfowers, with
the pangs Of hunger a-gnawin throo his
insides, than to "a worked
"Now, Absalom was afore my time,
but ! heard all about him from my pap,
an what my pap said was allus true
true as gawspel, it was When ole man
Bunkel died, Absalom was 85 year old
He didn't 60 off spendin his fortune.
Not much. He jest set right down on a
IOCklu CudkI Ou Uu0 lIOuu pOlCn oA ACt
his sister Nancy tend the house. Nance
MIXED the COW, Nance made the gar
den, Nance done the housework an come
to store. He done nothin-absolute
nothin.
He was never outer bed afore sun up.
Ef it was warm, he'd set on the leetle
porch all day, lookin over the valley,
watchin the folks goin by an the birds
a-swoopin along the flel's Or throo the
trees, listenin to the bees a-buzzin aroun
the garden, to the dreamy hum Of natur',
fer to do him credit he loved natur' Ef
1t was cold, he set all day be the fire.
place a-bakin his shins. Once in awhile
Nance'd fergit to leave him wood when
she went out fer spell. Does he cut
some? Not him. He jest goes to the
nearest possible fence rail, kerrys it in.
1er the house, sticks one end inter the