The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1897-06-04
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And life seem nothing but fun
II work-lo0kcd as little before vor -.
As il does when you get il done
Washington Star.
What is pronunciation. Uncle JimY'
ut is something you hunt up in a die
tionary one day and forget the next"
Chicago Record.
what Is nutritious food Irncle
AleckF 1T is food that Is So chaan
and plain that many people are asham-
ed to eat it."-Chicago Record.
How long did 1t take you to learn
the bicycle?" Me? u WASH, three
days before could lie as fast as any
Of hem.'-lndianapolIs Journal.
He-You haven't talked anything but
hat for the last three weeks. Suppose
you change the subject. SheLThat is
exactly what want to do.-Exchange.
Hobson-How are you getting on with
your bicycle? Dobson-Same wav as
usual. haven't learned the pedal
mount yet--New York Commercial Adj
vertiser.
She-Then papa dn't refuse to listen
to you? He-Not bit. began by
telling him | knew of a plan whereby
he could save money.-Cincinnat En-
/ quirer. Fl
Husband-Myl how you did snore last
night. | couldn't sleep. Wife-Why
didn't you wake me up?" Il thought
you were making enough noise as il
was'-To Date
Mrs. Hashcroft-Is there too much
seasoning in the turkey, Mr.. Billings?
Billings-No; should say there is too
little turkey in the seasoning. -Indi-
annapolis Journal.
"Of all the wonders Of the great
West, which was the one that Impress
ed you most?" Wondering how was
ever going to get back home."-Indi-
annapolis Journal
De Garry-Why is it that when fell
low is alone with a girl he loves they
seldom play cards? Merritt-Because
If they did she would have to hold her
own hand.-Judge.
Eyes, sir" said one sportsman, that
pugilist has just invented three new
blows" Him." replied the other. II
thought he seemed a. little out OF
breath. Washington Star.
"Kitty's little brother scared away
her new beau" what did the little
rascal doy' HE told the man that his
sister always took hot fiatlron to bed
with her"-Chicago Record.
"well, the weather man predicted
violent storms yesterday morning, and
nothing came OF it." "How can you
say so? There was a Wagner concert
last night Chicago Tribune.
First American proudly)-My daugh-
ter is engaged to viscount. Second
American with contempt)-Humpnl
That's nothing. My daughter has been
divorced by an earl.-Cleveland Lead
er.
Fond Papa-I trusts Ethel that you
are always a good girl. and never fiirt.
Dutiful Daughter-No, papa, never
flirt any more than you used to do
when you were a young man.-Somer-
vile Journal.
Lonesome Larry-rm awfully uncer-
tain about what | ate at dat bOardHn'
house. Weary WIllam-Nhat did it
look like? Lonesome Larry can't
describe il. but its nom de plume was
hash.-Adams Freeman.
'whatg exclaimed the high naval Off
cial mo more money to equip the bat
tleships for sea service? Have we
not" 1t was clear that he knew
whereof he spoke. "A sinking
fund Y'-New York Press.
Doesn't your daughter dancer in.
ouired the hostess. The lady addressed
looked around at the tall, anaemie giri
against the wall. "Not unless she Is
asked" she somewhat frigidly replied
Cleveland Plain Dealer. -,s.'--
what do you think is the matter
with her. doctor?' "AppendicilS' |
think" For heavens sake, don't tell
her She would die with Joy Il she
thought she had such fashionable as
se."-Cincinnati Record.
"Mr Henpeck," said the doctor ai'er
examination, Il fear your wlfes mihu
is gone" That doesn't surprise ms
said the poor man; "she has been CIV
. ing me a piece of it every day FOR zen
! years. memphis Seimitar
Mrs. Callipers with a rising luuec,
tion)-My dear? Mr.. Callipers-Well?
Ms. CallIpers-why is it that II man
has popularity he calls II eccentricl'y
ana if his neighhor has the same thlhs
. he calls It tomfoolery;-Iruth.
Does your husband still call you pet
, namesY" YES" said the wife OF a
, year: ives. he does. But he does so
with a little TOO much ease tihnk, II
sort of sounds as II it we're mere tne
Z result OF praeNee~fhan the expression
of undying Observation-Disclosures"
, News.
/ Il eau get you job al cutting lse M !,
! you want it, said the member OF tue
! Association for Extending Assistance
i to the Worthy Poor. I'm mu '
! obliged" said Perry Patet'c' "ou' SEE
in as how don't cut no Ice socially. |
guess | might jist as well0keep it up
along other lines aud not bust me rsPp-
). tatlon."-cinclnnati Enquirer. Z
p The cannuafnhierwas clearly ansss-
.4r,s, =. . .,.,,, mo- he teillan cNts