Lincoln County leader. [volume] (Toledo, Lincoln County, Or.) 1893-1987, 1897-02-04
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But shopping leads from h,d
1t is an empty boast. " worse
Washington Star.
She-You seem to forget ron,
sir. He-How could | do otbsrn.,l Wu,Stll
your presence?-Judy. "''e IN
Friend-I suppose evqwtbiD, ~
write now goes; Author-ya, 'y'a
most of it comes back.-IIarlem Tito T. o1
Il know now." remarked tho ,.
man who was sued for breach of n,or or'
lSe, why they call it 'courtlpp ~ piUu T,l
Bits. LIN
Editor-Your story is fiat Aut1o,
Yes? Editor wish to comn,,n,'-,
you. Most stories we get ara rnl%,
up.-Puck. '''''u
Uncle Simon, what is A Dharom,
non:' "A phenomenon is n man mn,
'ets so rich that he won't accent a na,,
IN Il railroad."-Chicago Record. ~
Bubbles-My wife and I mat b,
accident. Thrown together by chanos
as it were. Wheclwoman Ceagorlvl
Did you break the bicycles?-Buffah
Times.
Il Jared pretty well on Christmas
said the man with the blue coat "In
deed| Eyes; you know I'm Stree,
car carconductor."-Phlladelphia North
American.
Mrs. Newlywed Gn tears)-YOu uSea
to say that you would be glad to dp
for me. Mr.. Newlywed-Well, | woun
now. Mrs. Newlywed-Well, you NAV
now.-Judge.
"Ill wager that woman submarine
diver doesn't stay under the water more
than ten minutes at Il time" "Whyr
Nobody down there to talk tO."-ChL
cago Record.
"Pugilism isn't what it used to be-"
NO; the advances made in implements
of modern warfare have thrown it into
the shade somewhat" ."-Philadelphh
North American.
Hungry Higgins-All dis here hand
out lacks is finger-bowls. Weary Wat
kins-Yes, t'ink | could cit away wid
erbout a t'ree-tinger bowl myself-Il
dianapOlis Journal.
Representatives. men fell on live troll
ley wires to-day. City EditOr-Run 'em
In the current events column. (ChOrus
of groans from the force .)-Clncinnat
Commercial Tribune.
She-Mr. Fullback never boasts of bis
football exploits, does he? He-NO, |
understand that he has nearly killed
half a dozen men, but he never says
word about it.-Puck.
Called any today" "0nly once
and then l was left out in the cold
You don't mean it; where" Down
at Bagsley's. He held four aces"-Cin'
cinnati Commercial Tribune.
Alethea (blushingly)-Now, don't Mr.
Dusnap! / know little Ferdinand Is
watching at the key-hole. Dusnap-
Well, let's crafty his curiosity, and
then he may go away.-Puck.
II am sorry to hear that Allwuhl' tue
clothing merchant, has failed in OuS'
ness" How did it happen! "OVer.
confidence. He brought on carload
of ear-muffs. ."-ChicagO Tribune
Judge Ito couple sentenced for nglt
ing)-Have you anything to say Maze
Defendant-I would like to nave Ill!
wife commence her term in prison afIer
i am released.-German exchange
She-Do you believe in long engage
ments? He-Well, | think an engage
ment should be long enough TO TEST +"
mans constancy and to give the sH
time to learn to cook.-Brooklyh Liz
Helm waiting for the interesting
woman of 30 that the nOvellsts 'aiA
about. She-Well, you won't hnu ls. m
in Vienna. All the women mere uliu''
go are not over 22.-lllustrated bI''
"You know that old gag OF telling ..' Nv
beggar that you are working TINS siu"
of the street?' l tried it the other ua.'
did it work?" mo; he licked lle w
getting on his beat!-Chicago hecOiO'
Cholly-It would be queer don,nS, ~.
know, if the Theosophists were iisu, n'
and if we came to life again In sun. sun.
other form. She-Yes, Choliy, sOm. r.
folks might expect better luck n'-
time.-Puck.
Mrs. Mulligan-Do yez feel De..e, 1.,n ~
morning, Mrs. O'Toole? Mrs u wv, ,Ir,
do, and then again don't u,d |
Mulligan-Thot's bad, fur It's na.'r . =,
to know whether to say In sOi''
glad.-Harpers Bazaar.
"They must have had a cyciODsu "u,ba
at Newrlches' last week. .,obp,
makes you think so?' MT Ne"h hiOvI
said they had their monogram ou.es
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