Morning appeal. [volume] (Carson City, Nev.) 1877-1906, 1897-03-23
HANK AND HORACE
he Evening Record has Some
fun al DOC Benton.s Expense.

Carl Smith who was sent here for
the Chicago Record wrote a great
many clever things about Carson
which the APPEAL will reproduce from
time to time.
Here is enc OF his hou,e with Dee.
Benton:
DR.. Benton is an old-timer and is
rich in lecCl!ections de used to be
an army surgeon, but rheumatism or
something of the kind has tied his
right leg into a veritable knot and all
his surgery and medicine are una
Va'l1ng for his relief. The doctor
owns one Of The big livery stables in
the town and when a patron comes in
to get a rig the doctor says: lyon
want to knOw-hOw much it'll tie? Let
me see what time it is." Then he pulls
a massive gold watch from his pocket
and looks TefieCtinRlv at it. He then
proceeds utterly to ignore the question
OF time or price, but presenting the
watch 10 his visitors view he SAYS
This here watch belonged to Hank
Monk. You know Hank Monk, the
celet rated stage driver of course.
Well he drove sixteen yeArs for me
and some San Francisco people gave
him a present OF this watch, She's a
beauty amt shea"
II not just a beauty she is at least
cohs"Crable OF a watch. She looks
like two large golden saucers set to.
gether SO as to form a case with the
convex surfaces all wrought in relief
work. There are a lot of categorical
women of almost life size on the lid of
this monster tureen full of wheels and
mainsprings, and a whole forrest Of
trees, vines and plants. Inside is an
inscription asserting the friendship
n admiration of the donors for
Hank Monk and a line. Keep YOUR
seat Horace
what does that mean?' INQUIRED
LangdOn, to whom the story Of the
ride Of Greeley to Placerville had been
told only thi !ty-two times since his ar
rival-much as it has been told the
tourist Ia the book repeatedly and
tirelessly.
Inc doctor looked at him in amaze
ment. Haven't You heard Of Horace
Greeley's ride to P1acerville?" be
asked. He wanted to make a speech
there and was afraid he wouldn't have
time, ard so Hank Monk the stage
driver assured him he would pull him
Though. and he did by thunder"
Then Langdon became analytical.
How far away is Placerville?" be
inquired.
why" the other asked. with some
irritation.
What has that got to do with it?
This here wasn't a matter of distance
80 much rs it was a matter OF Hank
and Horace, don't you understand?
Why they made pictures about it. mo
il you go into the office right up over
the door youu see an engraving Of
Horace in the coach and Hank whack
ing it to his horses" And he wa we'd
the way to the little cubby hole at the
end OF the livery barn. But Langdon
did not care to go. He was after de-
tails.
What I should like to know" he
said, lis the exact speed and the
amount Of horse power exerted. How
much faster did the stage go than
this little dinky train which now
comes down from Reno? What was
the exact gradient? With these figures
we can readily reckon up the amount
OF praise due Mr.. Monk. I have seen
your picture, and it simply shows a
whiskered parsonage welding a whip
and a bald old gentleman sitting in a
stage looking off at the far-away
mountains. How big a house did Mr.
Greeley have at Placerville, and did
the ~box-office receipts pay for the wear
and tear OF the trip? Did he manag
get a bath somewhere before appear
ing on the platform?"
The old gentleman looked az Lang
don as though he were so1n" KIND of
a strange bird. Then be drea out his
big watch and gazed at it ioteu.ly, as
though for inspiration.
'Pshaw friend" he uttered at last
You don't seem to understand the
poiot of the thing at all. 1t amt the
speed. 1t amt the horses, it amt the
road, it amt the crowd at the opera +
house-it is just Hank and Horace ,
There's the point of it don't you see?
In Hank and Horace. Keep your
seat Horace says Hank and III see
you through
d il MI. Greeley think be could i'm =
Drove ON the Sneod h1, malLin. Nau !