The Telegraph-courier. [volume] (Kenosha, Wis.) 1888-1946, 1897-07-15
GAYETY PUT 70 GOOD USE
How FrenChman Made q Banquet OF .
Mess of Beans.


How FrenChman Made q Banquet Of .
Mess of Beans.
If it is not true that one English
man is match for four Frenchmen,
as John Bull was wont to boast in
the days of his long warfare against
Johnny Crapaud, yet, despite the
undoubted gallantry of French sol
diers, it is still commonly believed
that the English are better nation
at fighting than the French. But
Captain John Goldman, in a recent
volume of "reminiscences, relates
one amusing little instance in which
in the endurance of wartime hard
ships at least the mercurial Gaul
showed decided superiority.
1t was during the Crimean war,
when French and English fought
together against Russia, and the
camps of the allies lay close togeth-
er before Sevastopol. Provisions had
run short, and Captain Goldman,
calling first upon an English officer,
and shortly after upon a French
one, had an opportunity to contrast
the reception which they accorded
him. His British host was glum and
woebegone in the extreme.
'Come in, he said none too ami
| ably. sit down. wish / had some
| thing to offer you, but knave not.
Expected a dozen of porter and a
pair of fowls up today. Couldn't
have cooked the fowls if they had
come. No coal. However, might
have lived a day or two on the por-
ter, but done out of that too. Infer
nally miserable, by Jove.'
"And so he was,'' comments the
Yankee. HE looked it ALL" And
he goes on to remark that an Eng
lishman deprived of his roast beef
and his beer remembers them,
growls, and lies doggedly down to
starve, while a Frenchman-but
this is how he was received by his
friend, Lieutenant Courtois:
Before reaching his tent we
heard snatch from an opera. With
what empressement he rushed to
embrace us, invited us to dine, in
sisted upon it, and sent for some of
his comrades to meet his guests.
His larder was scarcely better stock
ed than that of the Englishman,
which had nothing in it. But roots
were grubbed up, and a fire was
made. Some rough boards were laid
out, and clean cloth was spread
upon them.
ION came the soup, hot, at any
rate, if it was homeopathic, and in
the other courses, which were nu-
merous, beans, the material of the
soup, were disguised in infinite va
riety with such skill that they
served for fish, roast, entremets and
dessert. / am sure we had salad Of
something, perhaps it was an old
green silk umbrella. A little red
wine was eked out with water, up
ON which we all pretended to be ex-
cited as we drank the health of the
emperor.
Beans again-as, alas, too often
With us at home-served for coffee,
and my jolly friends after dinner
tramped along with us on the road
for a mile, imagining we were all
on the boulevards and sharpening
their remembrance of the absent
JOY of ladies' company by address
ing every one they met as mademoi-
selle."
That was gayety put to good use
and of sterling quality. Little won-
der the delighted guest formulated
his conclusions thus Three or four
Frenchmen can live upon the ra-
tons of one Englishman and be
more jolly upon their empty stom-
achs than he would with tight
waistband When everything else
fails, they can live upon ragouts
made of rememb rances of the past
and seasoned with hopes Of good
times to come. "
Reasons Why Chamberlain Collie,
Cholera and DiarrhOea Rem