Pleasantville weekly press. (Pleasantville, N.J.) 1890-1911, 1897-08-25
Letter from Duckfarmer.
Riverside on the Nacut,
Glon doll Cove

Port Republic, August 81.
Beriah, my brother, where art thou :?
Clad in knightly armor, and with
weapons in hand, ready to go out on
that snake hunt? | patiently await
you. expected word from you in the
Press last week but in vain Iscanned it's
columns. fyou are studying the words
OF Teller and Chandler | can wait, for
their sayings are beneficial to struggling
Americans seeking light on the question
of finance. But l fear something has
happened. fear you are entaDgled in
an alliance with one of our buttermilk
girls. The last time | saw you you were
riding your bike in the vicinity of Port
Republic. There was an ingenious con-
trivance built of soap box on the front
OF the bike similar to the netted con-
trivance on the front of a trolley car to
pick up people who carelessly step in
front of the cars while in motion. You
told me you were going for eggs. Egg
zactly SO. But pardon me for disturb
ing you, / concluded that you were
going to scoop up a buttermilk girl,
ride her in captivity a la tandem TO
Bayslde Ridge farm at Leedes Pint, and
then WOO her into subjsction as did the
Romans who captured the Satine
women. If it be so WOO, WOO, WOO,
until you win her, for when won she
will shed everlasting sunshine over the
Henfarmer. Ii it be not SO, and if you
really desire one of the divine creatures
allow me to smooth the way by arrang-
ing the details. You shall make the
match and strike the spark, but when
you come for her, clad in knightly polish
ed armor blow your bugle outside the
moat The Riverside warder will an
nounce you, and let down the draw
bridge, for the institution of chivalry,
established in the eleventh century, still
holds sway on the South Side. There is
no crescent to conflict with the cross, SO
come boldly.
But what about that snake hnnt? st.
Patrick drove all the snakes out of
Ireland and his name is blessed to the
celtics. If we succeed in driving the
snakes out of America, or suppress them,
or convert them into angels, future gen.
erations will celebrate the day set apart
by the National Government to COM
memorate our deeds. The field is vast,
the calling for the sake of humanity. If
we don't succeed we can return to our
estates and sue eggs. l said in a
previous letter the snake was a Rather
if you spelled it with capital T.
Listen to the words of the poet and then
make ready for the fray:
Do you hear the scandal mongers pass
ing by,
Breathing poison in whisper, in q
sigh,
Moving cautiously and slow,
Smiling sweetly as they go,
Never noisy. gliding smoothly like
snake,
Slipping here and slipping there,
Through the meadow fresh and fair,
Leaving subtitle shine and poison in their
wake?
Saw you not the scandal monger as she
sat
Beaming brightly meath the roses in her
hat?
In her dainty gloves and dress,
Angel-like and nothing less
Seemed she, casting smiles and pleasing
words about.
Once she shrugged and shook her
head,
Raised her eyes and nothing said
When you spoke OF friends, and yet it left
a doubt.
Did you hear the scandal monger at the
hall,
Through the music, rhythm, beauty,
light and all?
Moving here and moving there
With q whisper light as air,
Casting shade WIS on sister woman's
famt-
Just whisper, word or glance
As they foated through the dance,
And the world is busy with q spotless
name.
You will find the scandal mongers every
where,
Sometimes men, but often women young
and fair,
Yet their tongues drop foulest slime
And they spend their leisure time,
Casting mud on those who climb by
work and worth.
Shun them, shun them as you 60
Shun them, whether high or low.
They are but the cursed serpents of the
earth.
URIAH DUCKFARMER.