, 1897-11-29
A CLOSE OBSERVER,
THE YANKEE 0RUMMeR's STRAIGHT
TALK ABOUT EUROPE.

Information About London, Paris and Ger.
many From a Big. Red Haired Mamie
Says He Kept His Eyes Open-Do You
Think He Did
"Greater New York is going to be
bigger than London, remarked the lit
tie man in the cross seat with an air of
wisdom.
"No. Stree. it isn't!" said the big red
haired MAJ who sat alongside of him as
he busted an invisible speck from his
new coat. lit won't be a marker to
London. I've been there"
"What-to London:"
"Sure, l have. 1t was three years ago,
and l know what I'm talking about.
Now, it's u strange fact that there AFRO
some fellows i'll u business that'll
travel all around and never see any
thing. l always keep my eyes open in
strange towns. 1t gives q man things to
talk about and it broadsns him."
The little man began to eye his COM
panion with new interest. He pondercd
his sage words for Il minute and said:
How'd it happen"
"Why, it came about Just after | left
you at st. Louis. | returned to New
York and brought lack with me $50, 900
worth of orders. That pleased the firm.
l can tell you. for no one was doing IL
business in those days. Our foreign buy
er was i'll ani as l was pretty we'll post.
ed Oh what the trade wanted the firm
said to me:
"'Here. Jones. you go over to the
continent and do our buying this win.
ter Did go: Well, does il tack SWIM
Where did you go:" asked the little
man.
London. Paris and Germ'ny."
Say. what kind of n town is London
anyway! I've always wanted to know. "
well, I'll tell you III the level It's
a bum, two for u cent place. It's no
good. and that's straight, I've been
there. Don't you let anybody fool you
about it. You can read all of this ,ub,.
lee stuff you want. and If any one tells
you London is any good you Just tell
him that Jones said it was on the bum. 3"
The little man face frightened up.
evidently from the delight of getting
authoritative statements first hand, and,
with the air of Il man who wanted to
improve each shining hour and add to
his stock of knowledge, he said:
TELL Inc about London. Is it any
thing like New York;"
mot u bit. | know all about the
town. It's 25 years behind the times.
It's like New York was before the war.
Why, honest. now. there are whole
rows Of houses that look like they were
falling down The streets are dirty and
crooked, and all houses are built flush
with the street. l couldn do any bust.
meas there at all. They are a saving
lot. those English"
ibid you see any fine buildings?'
mot one, except Il church or two
Now what I'm telling you Is honest.
There isn't u building i'll the whole
town worth seeing, and If there was
you couldn't see it halt the time. It's n
dirty, foggy place and not fit to live in.
It's an old apple woman Of n town Ev.
erybody in London drinks ale or gin.
I'm telling you straight. it's OH the
bum.'
'Paris is bigger. isn't it,"
"Well-er-no. Not exactly bigger
London is a whaling big place and
don't you make any mistake ! rode
right straight ahead II day from Z i'll
the morning until = in the afternoon.
and l was in London all the time. Par
is is different. l got some great bar
gains there.'
Ibid you take your wife with you to
Parisy'
mo: she staid in New York because
l was going OH business. can tell you
all about Paris, and you can rely on it.
for I've been there"
The little mans eyes frightened in
anticipation. and no said:
TELL me all about it-everything.
PARIS" said the big man i'll tho
ton Of a platform orator. lis all right.
and you can say that l said so. i0u
can live there and see the town on III
francs q day-that is $2-good living
too Sleeping costs you 40 cents anlght,
and you get a DON that would cost you
81. 80 in New York, Interpreter: Now,
that s nonsense that you We read. There
were four of US in the party. anu when
we started out we hired an interpreter,
When we'd taken about W OF them
French drinks-cognacks they call EN-,
sort of brandies they are-we gave the
interpreter the grand bounce and we
didn't zee him again Three OF those
cognacks will make you talk French like
q native. Fact, because | tried it. -Four
Of them will make you feel as II you
had taken q $40. 900 order for goods
that the firm wanted to get rid OF.
did you zee any interesting build.
ings or places!"
saw the whole outfit. and it's no
great shakes The Palls boulevards are
pretty fine, though
The little man looked disappointed
at his friends meagcrness OF detail.
Then no remembered Germany. ana he
asked his friend what he had seen there.
Now you are getting right int my
stamping ground. said the big man.
''aermany beats them all went to
Berlin. aud, say. | bought u line OF SAT
inets there that netted the firm $'o.OOo.
Now, what do you think OF that! was
not that q good strok.: Oh. ! tell you
Germany IL my stamping eround!'
what Interested vru there
why, | saw everything. aud now
the Germans drink beer! II l hadh
been afraid that th.tSr s;ltint Is would 30
out Of fashion. Id have made II bigger
stroke on them. Low. don you let any
one fool you uiout those places Just
- a -. .-,,& - Wn lnhf 1