The indicator., 1897-10-16
BOB AND HIS WHEEL.
THE, AUMoR,sr TELLS ArALE.
How He Tackled His Hike with Confidence.
and Left 1t In Confusion What 1t Did
to Him.

Robert Burlettc. the famous bumor-
list, in letter to the Burlington Hawk
eye, denies the report that he is dead.
in the following letter, dated Bryn
Mawr. The story is told in his own Pc
culiar style, and proves that the hu-
1nOrlst IL very much alive, although
somewhat worsted by his experience
with the bike:
My Dear Waite:-I.ike the true friend
ana loyal comrade you ever were, you
do right to protest against my burial
prior to autopsy.
am indeed very much alive. Not on
ly 80, l havn't been dead even a little
bit. Not once. Could have been had |
wanted to be. Could be yet. but don't
want. Maybe ought to be, even now.
But as we make weekly confession
1--WE have left undone those things
which we ought to have done"
Possibly the rumor that | have gone
dead grew out of the fact that | haye
learned to ride bicycle say "hayc
learned" not ''am learning" Learned
in one lesson. all by myself Went out
in the moonlight last Friday night TO
learn, having first locked my family in
mo house and forbade them to lcol ont
or the windows. Led my bicycle out
on the turnpikc-the Bryn Mnwr pixies
are brohdcr than the way to deSIruc-
ton, twice as smooth and much clean
en-. It's young bicycle. II colt-foalel
in oI. Would give the name but for
the fact that had 10 pay for the wheel.
VIII only say. therefore in accordance
with the ethics of our profession, that
II is not the wheel anybody says il is.
held him by the wiihers right in the
middle OF the road, and mounted with
out assistance
l dismounted in thc same independ-
Got on again and proceeded to break
him to saddle.
Did ride the first time?
Well, say,
People had told mc-lars of all ages
and both scXcs-t that | couldn't fall If.
when | felt that | WIS falling would
stick out my foot
! stuck out both feet and hands and
fell on my head.
| fell on one side Of that dahoiiral
wheel and then on the other; I fell on
both sides at once: | fell on top of ii
and underneath 1t. and made dog
falls" with ii. fen between the
wheels; fell behind the wheel and he.
fore the front wheel at the same time
and don't know yet how did it. fell
and thrust both legs through the spokcs
of one wheel. met II terrified man in
a buggy and drove him c.ear OF the
pike through Who.ler hedge. and |
don't think he has vet come back. Ev-
cry time | fell | slapped the palms of
my raw. swollen. tlIrohbp. hands ON
the hard. "inclastic" pike except the
time fell on my head. ] fell harder
and with greater variety of landing
than any man could fall unless liz
dropped out of n ballcun and lit in II
load of furniture. lost my confidence.
my patience. my temper. my clamps,
lamp. bell and reputation. | broke one
pedal. the saddle and rhc ordinance
against loud. boisterous and abusive
language at night. ran into every
thing in sight except the middle of the
road. ! sat down on everything in the
township except the saddle. | scurcll-
cI in Il circuit not fifteen feet in circun-
ference until you could smell brim-
stone. | made more revolutions than n
South American republic. ana didn't
get ten feet away frGm where | start
ed. ! haven't been 50 maulcd anil
nbraided, so thumpcd and beaten. So
trampled upon and pounded, so bruised
and scratched since | left the army But
! can ride. don't say that "do." but
"can."
Do consider hiking good for the
health?
For the health of some people do.
! don't see how Il physician can bring
up his family unless his children have
something 10 eat.
But in my own case | reserve my de
cisicn. I will wait until know whcth.
cr I am going TO die or get we'll And
do You tell Brother Davis 10 Keep his
obituary on the standing galley until
lie hears from SLUG Nine" don't be.
lieve I've get go yet. although friends
who called Ia spc me break
down when they say goodbye" and
walk out of the room on tiptuc. Bui I
wouldn't mind that If | knew what had
become of my shouldcr-blndcs the time
| ran under The hay-wngn Checrfully
Nours.-R. j. Rurlettc in Farm Mach
inery.