The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1897-05-01

for a red-nosed man to look coldly in
tellectual-Puck
Shell think ! might love you more
II you were not so extravagant He
It's my extravagant nature that makes
me love you so.-Life.
as your picture in the Academy a
success That's what am wonder
ing. Some one said 1t was worth the
price OF admission. Puck
Gracie-Papa, a monologue Is when
people talk to themselves. Is II not,
Papa-Yes: or. sometimes. when they
talk to their husbands.-Puck-
Arthur would marry that girl but
for one thing. Chester-Afraid TO pop
the question? Arthur-No. Afraid to
question the pop.-Brooklyn Life.
Tagleigh - Balloon sleeves were
bound to 90 up in the end. Wagleigh-
Sure. That Is why they were named
balloon sleeves.-Boston Traveller.
Brown-Have you decided what you
are going TO call the baby? Jones-Oh,
yes Were going to call him whatever
name my wife may select.-Puck-
Hawson-Some men go through this
world as though they owned II. I wish
l could Blinks-Why don't you buy
wheel ?-PhIladelphia North American.
John" said Mrs. snaggs to her hus-
band. do you know the date Of Noah's
foodY" yes" What was itY In
undate.~ Pittsburg Chronicle-Tele-
graph.
"Jumleigh lost an awful lot Of money
on the election" Ibid he tell you so?"
mo; but when asked him he told me
II was none Of my business. "-Roxbury
Gazette.
Mr.. Peck during the dispute)-Bn.-
but-my dear wife Mrs. Peck-SI-
lence, sir, I'll not but Bo-hoo, Now
you're calling me goat-Philadelphia
North American.
Brazen Boarder (at dinner tablet
can tell n fowls age by its teeth. Sur
prlsed Landlady-But fowls have no
teeth. Brazen Boarder-No; but have.
Texas Siftings.
Il don't think Jerklelgh would hesi-
tate in telling a lie." said Radbowen.
YES. he would" said Chesney. What
makes you think 500" He has to.
He suffers -Tid-Bits
Aunt Gladys" said the small girl,
do you say a man has or Is leftF'
1T depends. dearie,' replied Aunt Gla-
dys. dreamily. ION the man."-Cincin-
natl Commercial Tribune.
Il tell you that juror in a murder
case has an awful responsibility on
him" Eyes, indeed. II he goes 10
sleep he is liable to be fined for con-
tempt OF court New York Truth.
Jinks-Thcre is a man who has a
number Of movements on foot for max
mig money. Binks-Who is hef Jinks
i don't know his name. but he's
dancing teacher.-New York Adver
tiser.
Shell am quite sure you had toe
much champagne when you called or
me yesterday afternoon. He-les;
thought I'd just look round to-day t'
see II l was engaged to you.-Piek-Me
Up.
mamie got a diamond ring for he
Christmas" How did she get IL?
~Hung up her stocking" Jack, o
coursef But how did Jack get itT
Hung up his watch.
Monthly.
I'm not much on stahtisticks,' salt
Ephraim jefferson. but I'll bet thutt.
cents dat 4.764.321 paths OBJ slippah
done bin made by young women 10
young men dat won't nevah wore dem.
baltimore News.
First Author-I learned the typewrii
or In two weeks. and yet you say yo
can't get the hang Of it at all. II
, strange. Second Author-Not al al
strange. My vocabulary is so large
, Cincinnati Enquirer.
Mrs. Cawker-This story you CAV
, me TO read is not completed in thi
number: II is a continued story. Nj
Cawker-Stops short. does IT, "Yes.
: .Then l should say il was discoI
tinued story."-Harper's Bazaar.
The poet enters timidly. Here ar
+ a few verses. Mr.. Editor" he says. de
crpntlNllN. llt NANH'N
e looking up. says. busily: please thro'
a them in the basket YOURSELF haven
!, time lust owl lllustre de Poche.
r Curious circumstances under whic
4 Stlckem left his boarding house, sal
a drummer. speaking Of an acquain
= ance whose character wasn't above n
z proach. Indeed, What was there cl
c rious about ity'' asked a friend. ~Ths
q he didn't take the house with him.
2 Buffalo Times.
The Living Skeleton (surprlsedl-No
: look terribly blue-and yet. only la
week you married the beautiful huma
centipede. The Osslfied Man (gloomil.
i am blue. No sooner are we two hal
PLY married than she gets the cycliu
fad, and have to buy her a sextet b
= cycle,-Puck.
r Mother (to her S-year-old daughtert
Now, Mabel, want you 70 sit down
r once and mend that hole In your apro
. have spoken 10 you about IL alread
I three or four times today. Mabel
Wen. mamma. you oughtn't TO spea
about il so often. Yon know the mot
: you taught me says. The least Sa