davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13
WIT AND WISDOM.

--"You are tagged out; you must give
up all headwork." "Why, that spells
ruin! TIN a hairdresser!"-La Petit
Provincial.
An Tnlxind -She-"Does my
new dress give me good flt?" He-I
think it will when you see it in the
glass" Detroit Free Press.
Elm afraid your young man is not
economical" Eyes, he is, papa; he
asked me to go sleigh riding tonight.
and he wants to borrow your cutter"
Chicago Record.
-Yeast--"I never knew a tramp to
work in my life" Crimsonbeak--
swell, 1 have. You ought to see them
work on my wife's sympathies."-
Yonkers Statesman.
1.-THE difference betweenastreetan and
Il woman said the Cheerful Idiot to
the assembled and up-to-that-time hap
by boarders, sis that the cross streets
are the quietest." -Indianapolis Jour-
nal.
-Timid Old Lady (watching the
agitated water)-"Are there ever any
persons lost in this river, boatman?"
}'erryman--"Bless yer, no, mum; we
allus finds 'em agin the next day!"-
Tit-Bits.
~ see" said Mrs. Hashcroft, shat
they have passed an ordinance impos-
ing fine on anyone who yells fire in
church" "Oh, WE'LL" said the Cheer
full Idiot, that sort of preaching has
pretty much gone out of date, anyway"
Indianapolis Journal.
Simmons "What is the matter
with you? You look as if some one had
made you angry Timnins-"Some
one has. l asked the editor of the
Bugle what he really thought of my
poetry, aud he told me that il there
were such places as the laureateship in
this country, would be sure to get
it."-Indanapolis Journal.
Not Unreasonable Haven't had
anything to eat for "a hours, haven't
your" said the man who had stopped a
moment TO listen to tale of woe.
"Well, here's dime" "That won't go
very far towards satisfyin' appetite
like mine responded Mosely Wraggs,
with on apologize cough. EFF you
don't mind, cap'n, I'll use it for
quenchin' my thirst" And he dieap-
peared with great alacrity.-Chicago
Tribune.
"A Great Weight Lifted.-"I pre-
sumo, Mr.. uarkus," said young Sorrel-
top, who had lately married into the
family, "Ethel will take her piano with
her when we go to keeping house?"
"Indeed she will not" answered his
father-in law. "That piano belongs to
her mother" "Thank you, Mr.. Harkus!
Thank you!" exclaimed the young man,
grasping him fervently by the hand;
and the light of great JOY shone in his
eyes.-Chicago Tribune.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13
Decline of Hypnotism.

1t is pleasing 10 note that hypnotism,
which, few years ago had fully at
tanned the proportions of a medical fad,
at least in France. has for some time
been declining, and at the present time
it may be said to be falling rapidly into
disflvor with intelligent practitioners,
and most rapidly with those who
have seen the most of it. Most ply
scians who have had an opportunity
to observe carefully the subjects OF
Hypnotic treatment in the clinics at the
Hospital Salpetriere, in Paris, will
ugree with the writer that the hypnotic
state is morbid or pathological con-
dition, and also that the hypnotic state
is one which cannot be easily induced
except in persons who are morbidly
weak mentally those whose volitiona-
ry powers are decidedly Detective
Good Health.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

Nor AN ENTHUSIAST HERsELF.-Mrs. Up
ton Greene (who has been watching an
Italian collect cigar stumps) -'Dear mel
pve heard Of this mania for collecting
things, but that's carrying a fad too farl"-
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13
SCrOfuIa

Manifests itself in many different ways, like
goitre, swellings, running sores, boils, sails
rheum and pimples and other eruptions.
Scarcely man is wholly free from 1t, in
some form. 1t clings tenaciously until the
last vestige Of scrofulous poison is eradi-
Gated from the blood by Hoods Sarsapa-
rilla. Thousands of voluntary testimonials
tell Of suffering from scrofula, often in-
herited and most tenacious, positively, per-
fectly and permanently cured by
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

Miss OLDuN (playfully) older than
you think ann Miss Caustique-"l doubt
it."-Tit-Bits.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13
Clssnihed.

Wade--What do the papers mean
when they speak of "The Man of the
Hour?'
Butcher--A fellow forgotten the
lext moment Puck. -
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

"BRowN's BRONCHIAL TRocHEsn are an
effectualremedy for all Bronchial Affections
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

THREE through sleeping car lines to Flor
ida daily via the Queen g. Crescent Route.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

Good Mrs Porter's already perturbed
mind was greatly exercised next morn
ing by the receipt of an epistle from the
faithful Martha, her late cook, stating
that as Marthu's mother had nov quite
recovered she proposed returning to
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

PLANTATION, when Maud she says, with
n sort of laugh: oh, it's the entrails OF
n ruminatin' animal, she says, but
didn't know it was used Tor food and
after that, Tony, ordered whitebait,
an loin of mutton and a pheasant"
at seems to me, Mariar, that you're
losing flesh over this. You amt the
.lgure you was three months ago."
"The thing that worries me worst,
Tony, is that the 'ouse amt near well
enough cleaned. Maud she does her
best, but she amt got the trainin'.
She's afraid to do bit of scrubbin', and
she does all the dustin with gloves on"
"Umph. Mutiled cats catches no
MICE" senientiously remarked Mr..
Porter. "lake my word for it, Marian,
well never feel the 'ouse our own till
they're out of it,"
"And I'm sure, Tony" went on Mrs.
Porter, determined to fully unburden
her mind, that they employ char
woman surreptitious. | saw one slip
PIN out by the side door yesterday"
"Well, Marian, there's just one thing
to do, and that's to give 'em warnin at
once."
ME, Tony? Oh, no, couldn't. Don''
ask me. Their third months up to-
morrow, too. If they was only dissatis-
fled now, and would leave"
don't you count on that, my girl
They knows when they're comfortable
They're here for life, except you sum
mons up your courage and chucks en-
"Tony, dear, you're brave man
Won't you, to please your Marian, just
tell them to go yourself?" said Mrs
Porter, coaXingly.
But MIR. Porter refused decidedly.
mo, Marian, nonsense. A man 'as
no business meddling with woman's af
fairs" Then, temporising, "rll tell you
wot'll cheer you up, old girl. You
come in to town tomorrow and I'll give
you lunch and treat to follow. Wotl
it be?"
ooh, l know, Tony. Pork pies ant
stout, and we'll go to the Aquarium
afterwards"
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

ALTERNATE rest and labor long endure
Ovid.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

The River Dee in Scotland has hau
Iaore poems written in its honor than
sny other stream On the British Use.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13

-.Fhe classic literatureisalways mod.
,rn. New books revive and redecorate
Id ideas; old books suggest aud inviR
rate new ideas.--BulWer.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1896-03-13
UPSTAIRS AND DOWN.
by MARY STUART BOYD.

lie light from a
large ha n g N G
lamp fell softly
upon the daintiiy
laid dinner-table.
Its glow centered
upon the russcts
and Colds of The
crysanthc m II m s
in the Venetian
glass jar, an d
more family il
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
STATE FARMERS.

The West Virginia State Board OF
Agriculture held meeting at Buck
harmon, Upshur county, Thursday,
June II. With the exception Of l..
Rathburn, the whole board was in at
tendance. The secretary read his an
nual report, which showed a very
small margin to continue the printing
of the Farm Reporter, which now has
a circulation of 6ooo copies and is sent
free to all who write to the secretary
stating that they are farmers and ask
ing for the paper. The farmers re-
gard this as their own paper and its
columns are open to all who desire to
discuss farm subjects. It was decided
to continue the monthly edition as
long as finances would permit. The
board cannot accomplish much with its
scanty funds, but is trying to do the
very best it can for the farmers with
the scanty means on hand. 1t is to be
hoped that the next legislature will
be more liberal in dealing with us.
The citizens of the town and county
WED with each other in making our
stay a pleasant one. The Farmers
Institute on Saturday, held under the
direction of the State Board, despite
the pouring rain, was a grand success.
The papers read showed care and judg-
ment, and were we'll received and dis
cussed by the audience. Music was
furnished by the ladies Of the town,
and the songs, duets and solos were
exceptionally fine.
Hon. T. ]. Farnsworth took great
interest in the meetings and we were
under many obligations to him. In
fact all tried to make our visit pleas
ant one. The Board adjourned Satur-
day night and all started tor home
Sunday morning. The Board will
hold its next meeting at Charlestown,
the first Monday in October. A. c.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
Middleway Murmurs.

las. w. Barringer. of this place,
has accepted a position at Harpers
Ferry.
Misses Cora Beard and Clara Gus.
ter, OF Sandy Hook, Nd, were the
guests of Mrs. Geo. w. Anderson,
last Saturday and Sunday.
R. c. Anderson, of this vicinity
was in Harpers Ferry, last Sunday.
Many persons of this community
attended the floral decorations at
Winchester and Shepherdstown.
The Perry trial drew many persons
to Charles Town during the week.
Mr.. Andrew. Gill, aged 50 years,
died near here, on June s. A wife,
son, and daughter survive him. We
extend our sympathy to the bereaved
family.
The health of this community is
not very good at present.
Harry Snyder, of near Martinsburg
was in this community last Monday.
Miller Small made us a visit last
week.
Joseph Glasford, of near Charles
Town, gave US pleasant call last
week.
Children's Day services at the M.
F. church, South, last Sunday.
CLIPPER
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
Much Ado About Nothing

Sensational reports were circulated
from ST. Louis last week that colored
delegates could not get board and
lodging in the hotels of the city.
1t is true that some colored men
were refused quarters by some houses
which were full at the time or had all
their rooms engaged, but upon inves.
tigation it was learned that but one
hotel, the st. James, was the only one
that refused to entertain them
Other houses such as the Southern,
Lindell, and Planters offered no OBJ
lection and the trouble, much magni
fed, ceased to exist
AS some interest may be felt in the
class of men sent from the South tc
the convention, we clip the following
from a special dispatch to the Phila
delphia Press, feeling that it may in .
measure at least correct erroneous i'm
pressions formed in xsaataon to them
The dispatch says:
There weresprinkled through tn,
crowd quite number Of colored men
mostly from the SouthA-not the bur
ly, addressed, careless kind-theil
fronts covered with perfect rainbow
of decorative colorsl With perhap.
one exception they were exceIlen
types Of the race Bright, weil-be
haved, gentlemanly men, neithe
subservient nor obtrusive, they wer,
Of the kind through whose effort aut
example must ultimately come the Re
demption Of the col9red race.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
Summer Vacation Tours.

The Baltimore & Ohio R. r. Co.
now has on sale at all its offices east
of the Ohio River a full line of tourist
excursion tickets to all the lake,
mountain and seashore resorts in the
Eastern and Northern States and in
Canada. These tickets are valid for
return journey until October 81. Be
fore deciding upon your summer out
ing it would be we'll to consult the B.
& 0. Book of Routes and Rates for
Summer Tours" Ali B. & O. Ticket
Agents at principal points have them,
or they will be sent upon receipt Of
ten cents, for postage, by Chas. o.
Scull, Gen'l Passenger Agent, B. s.
0. r. R., Baltimore, Md. 40
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
Our Currency rIust be the Best.
A Vigorous Foreign Policy.

This is or used to be the best nation
in the world. If it is not now it is be-
cause we have failed to measure up
to our privilege or right. What it
has been. it can be again. All that is
needed to restore our pristine vigor
is to restore confidence in the ability
of the Government to meet all its OBJ
legations dollar for dollar. That done,
prosperity will return. The misera-
BILE blunder of four years ago has set
us back rs years. Such blunders must
not be repeated. Free trade was bad
enough. but it cannot compare to the
trouble which would ensue were the
free and unlimited coinage of silver,
in opposition to the best thought of
the world, to become the policy of the
nation. Through all of the troubles
of the past there has been no serious
attempt to debase the currency. The
rag baby idea of '6S and the resultant
greenback craze undoubtedly conduc-
ed to the panic of 70, but it was
fought to the death in rs and '76.
Since then free coinage of silver has
been the only menace and it WILL go
as all other such crazes have gone.
The sober second thought-the bet
ter thought-of the people will pre-
vail and our credit will remain un-
furnished.
The Republican party favors the
largest possible use of silver and will
in the future as in the past utilize all
of the products of the nation to the
greatest good of the greatest number
of people. The great business interests
cannot be sacrificed for the benefit of
owners of silver mines in the West or
bullion brokers in the East. Farmers
and laborers want the very best money
and they are entitled to it.
The best money in the world is
gold. The best nations of the Old
World have adopted the gold standard
and are thereby growing rich and
powerful This, the best nation of
the New World. cannot think of de-
basing herself to the level of India,
China, or of the nations of South and
Central America. We must keep in
touch with the most advanced thought
of the world. and that thought is that
there cannot be two standards of
money values.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

Mckinley, of Ohio, was nominated fo1
the presidency on the first ballot. The
choice for the vice-presidency fell
upon Garrett A. Hobart, of New Jersey,
also on the first ballot.
On the defeat of a silver proposition
offered by the silver men as substi.
tute to the gold platform, % silver
delegates, headed by Senator Teller,
of Colorado, left the convention.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

After meals you should have sim.
ply feeling of comfort and satisfac-
ton. You should not feel any special
indications that digestion is going on.
II you do, you have indigestion,
which means not-digestion. This
may be the beginning of so many
dangerous diseases, that it is best to
take it in hand at once and treat if
with Shaker Digestive Cordial. For
you know that indigestion makes
poison, which causes pain and sick
ness. And that Shaker Digestive
Cordial helps digestion and cures in
digestion. Shaker Digestive Cordial
does this by providing the digestive
materials in which the sick stomach
is wanting. 1t also tones up and
strengthens the digestive organs and
makes them perfectly healthy. This
is the rationale of its method of cure,
as the doctors would say. Sold by
druggists, price 10 cents to $500 per
bottle.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

Hon. Smith Turner of the VIM
chester Congressional District declines
to ask for denomination. In an adj
dress to the voters Of his district he
says, referring to the movement for
free and unlimited coinage OF silver at
10 to I: my conviction being decid-
ed that such policy would be ruinous
to the best interest of our people, /
could not defend it on the stump. Fol-
me to do SO with my convictions
would be hypocrisy and a consequent
loss of my self-respect. So, forced tc
choose between seat in Congress and
the preservation of my self-respect,
cannot hesitate. Charles Town Free
Press.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
A Handsome Book on Summer
Travel.

The Baltimore & Ohio R. R. Co.
has just issued handsome book de.
scriptive of the various summer re.
sorts, in the mountains and by the
seaside, adjacent to or reached by its
system of lines.
1t is finely printed and illustrated
by number of very fine cuts. Send
10 cents to Chas. o. Scull, Gen'l
Passenger Agent, Baltimore. Nd. for
a copy. az
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

tOh dear, said the young woman
OF social aspirations, Il wonder why
those stupid typewriter people put the
I and % SO close together feel as
certain as ! am sitting here that /
wrote nit instead of mot in that
note to Mrs Leader. wonder what
she will think of me. Cincinnati
Enquirer.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
FOR SILVER.
West Virginia Conventions Instruct
for Free Coinage.

Wheeling, June I7.-Four Demo
cratic District Conventions. selected
delegates to the Chicago Democratic
National Convention, and all four de-
clared unequivocally for the free and
unlimited coinage ofsilver. The con.
ventions were as follows:
Clarksburg, First District-Dele-
gates. William E. Kincaid, Cameron,
w. E. R. Byrne. Braxton Court House,
and John A. Howard, Wheeling.
Davis. Second District-Delegates
John ]. Cornwall, Parsons; E. d. Tai
bott, Randolph, and John 7. McGraw,
Grafton.
Hinton, Third District-Delegates
j. w. St. Clair, Fayetteville Cat large)
]. H. Miller, Hinton, and E. Tierney
WEIGH.
Point Pleasant. Fourth District
Delegates, H. S. Wilson, Parkersburg
]. R. Wilson, and B. B. Harding,
Cabell County.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
DO You Want 10 Buy q
Buggy!

II you do, you want an assortment
from which to make selection. In
that case, if you want a phaeton, sur
reg, buggy, trap, or stick wagon,
why not call on Sencindiver & Stew
art, on Winchester avenue? They
have the Studebaker Langtry Surrey,
Popular Phaeton, Izzer Buggy, Prim-
rose and Clipper, without tops, some
thing new in the Studebaker line,
and about 40 others from which to
select, all at very reasonable prices.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
Death From Blood Poison

Is often caused by the absorption O.
poisonous fats used in ordinary toilet
soaps.
MAGIC SAPo contains neither ami,
NAL fats nor vegetable oils and is alb
solutely free from poison. It viii
cure all Skin Diseases, Chaps, Freck
les and Pinples and is unexcelled al
toilet soap. Ask your druggist o.
dealer for it. Price 10 cents.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
Bucklen's Arnica Salye.

THE BEST SALvE in the world for Cuts
Bruisers. Sores Ulcers, Salt Rheum
Fever Sores, letter, Chapped Hands.
Chilblains, Corns, and all Skin Erup.
tions, and positively cures Piles. or nc
pay required. 1t is guaranteed to give
perfect satisfaction or money refunded
Price % cents per box. For sale by l.
G. Matthaei,r Duggist.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

If our Democratic friends were con-
sistent they woald take up for the
leading commodities of the several
states and have them declared to te
legal tender. The time was in Vir.
ginia when man could buy a wife
for certain number of pounds O.
tobacco. Here in the Valley limestone
is very abundant and while the WesI
is kicking for silver why not make a
drive for limestone currency? Their
we could ali be rich. If not lime why
not iron or cotton or corn or wheat Of
baied hay. Then when a fellow goI
hard up he could easily replenish hi.
exehequer.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
Cheap Dishes.

At Kilmer's China Hall for thi.
spring trade a tremendous stock o
Dinner, Tea and Toilet sets just re
ceived, and will be sold at prices way
down. You cannot afford to pas:
Kilmer's China Hall if you want any
thing in the cookery line.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

Among the solid men and staunch
Republicans of Martinsbnrg, none
stand higher than John w. Martin, OF
the First ward, who is candidate for
the office of Justice. Mr.. Martin is
not only all right in every particular
but is entitled to every consideration
which can be bestowed upon a faith
full party worker. If nominated he
will not only be elected but will add
strength to the ticket.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

Establishments for bicycle cleaning
have been opened in Berlin. For a
small annual subscription the wheel
is called for, cleaned, and returned to
the subscriber whenever he desires.
London city has now about twenty.
three miles of roadway laid with noise.
less material, three fourths being as,
phalt and the rest wood.
An exchange says: "Calico print
works use 10000, 900 dozen eggs pei
year, wine CHARTERS use 10, 600, ooo
dozen, photographers and other indus
tries use many millions, and these de-
mands increase more rapidly than
table demands"
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20
Wagons and Wagons

The Studebaker is the best wagon
in the world. A full line-I4 diff
ferent styles, any width Of tire, at
Sencindiver & Stewards, Winchester
avenue.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

After all the worry about the finan-
cial plank in the National Republican
platform, there is very slight improve
ment on that formulated and adopted
by the recent Grafton convention.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

VIM. H. Mcdonald, of Opequor
district, is announced in this issue o.
the Herald as candidate for Sheriff
Billy as he is known throughout
the county is Republican from way
back. He is not only a safe man, but
one who will not Cypress the people,
his past record being certain guar
antee in that particular. So success
full has he been as a party worker that
he has become known as the "Sly Fox
of the Opequon, and if nominated his
election is sure to follow as he is a
worker, untiring and earnest.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

Now we suppose our Allensville
friends are supremacy happy. How
they will shout, work and vote for
Mckinley. They don't care whether
it is Bill Mckinley or Mckinley Bill.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

Boss Plat, of New York, tried to be
cranky, but they just wouldn't let
him. He got nearly all he asked for
in the contests from New York and
then had nothing to kick about.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

How do you like our ticket for a
starter? Next week we shall add
Aston G. Dayton and then George
w. Atehison, and-but Berkeley
County did not indorse any more.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

And they do say the street roller is
not such terribly bad thing after all.
What worries us is that it was not ex-
hibited on the front streets two
months ago. Had it been, the result
of the recent election would have been
at least 200 to the good.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

Your Uncle Mathew Stanley Quay
very rarely fails to get into all the
games going on. If the other fell
lows won't play in his yard, why
he walks into theirs and enjoys the
sport Just as much as if he had not
been sighted. Mathew is a politi-
clan.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-06-20

| hereby announce to the voters of
Berkeley county that l am candidate
for the office of Clerk of the County
Court, subject to the action of the Re-
publican nominating convention.
|. l.. BENDER.