Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-07-26

Ing CUT OF the COuutIt- w 49, -
loyalty. OF course, there have been 10y
al men in America. Gen. Washington
was one. Cen. Lee was another, Gen.
Mcclellan was another. and Gen. Stone
wall Jackson was another. These are
the few exceptions that go 10 prove the
rule. that. as a nation, while We are Tlch
in politicians, ne are very poor IN pa
triots."
Just then Miss Betty was interrupted
BY q peculiar sound. which was traced
10 Miss Anna. and il was discovered that
she was crying her heart out over the
woes Of her favorite herOine-Amelia,
in VANITY Fair" Is il not beautiful
TO think that that book was written?
Unlike Miss Anne, Amelia Is not my
favOri,e. but still am proud that some
one who spoke the same language that
/ do wrote a book JhGt VIII make people
forget their own sufferings. even though
they take up the woes OF others when
reading IL. Miss Betty advised MISS
Anne 10 keep quiet and nor make a
goose of herself. Then she began 10 talk
about tears.
TEARS AS 4 WOMAN'S WEAPON.
Tears. she said, properly managed,
are without any doubt the finest Weap-
on in the womanly armory. Il IS only
when one gets very red in the face,
and when ones eyes swell, that they
are not TO be INDUCED in, but even then
the sknlful use Of the handkerchief viii
make q slight practice possible Weep
ing is the sharpshooung OF the gentier
sex. i is very direct. and seldom falls
in its aim. A woman should De per
mi-led 10 cry for anything, from moon
70 a millionaire, and her chances Of gei-
ting either Will be greatly increased by
the proper Introduction OF tears. Shakes
peare knew the value Of tears. so did
Byron. so did Shelley. so did Tom
Moore. and so did this later poet, Ten
nysOn, OF whom so many people speak
Well. though for my par, prefer more
manly writer's. As I said before, wO-
man must manage ner tears properly.
There are times and seasons when tears
are really CT no earthly use, being
SIMPLY A WASTE OF AMMUNITION,
our properly directed. -ears will. nine
times out OF ten, transport 10 the femi-
nine feet either The special moor or the
special millionaire that is lOnged for.
People talk. my dear about the world
being the same old world and the same
CID emotions governing it, and every
thing Of that kind. but there are cycles
CT emotion just as certainly as there are
tides and changes Of the moon, of fash
ions and of politics. Where are Romeo
and juliet of Verona nowadays? Where
would YOU find an army of people fight
ing another army of people for a woman
as men did years ago for Helen? Where
would YOU find
A WHOLE CITY AT THE FEET OF
ONE WOMAN.
as very often happened years ago IN
Athens. or in Rome? I do most DOS
itiyely believe that if Romeo and Juliet
and all the rest of them were living
nowadays, that juliet would marry
Paris and carry on q filtration. after
marriage, with Romeo.
She would lunch with him al The fash
iCnable restaurant, she would drive out
with him in his hanson. and make
him send her bouquets of flowers every
day; she would name her first baby after
him. and the chances are her husband
would grow fond of him, and talk about
7 -
diculOuS feeling, but that was all non
sense. and my wife and Rooney and I
are the most devoted friends possible.
He would call him Rooney, 1 am certain!
Il is the fashion of the day, TO take all
dignity on, Of names. Think of my
beautiful name of Elizabeth" being
boiled down TO Betty" Though, real
~, l should feel very badly if anybody
called me by my name in all its statei-
ness. l am a bit interested as to the
emotional period that we are IN just
now, and, my dear, except that we have
vulgarzed it a little. do believe that
We have gotten 10 the Egyptian stage.
People are trying TO prove that
CLEOPATRA WAS A SMALL,
BLONDE WOMAN,
very eXcitable, and liable at any mo-
ment 10 an attack Of the nerves. This,
of course, makes her seem very like the
average woman in society to-day. Then,
if Cleopatra were like this, il is fair to
conclude that Anthony and Julius
Caesar could not have been such tire
some men as history makes them, but
really very nice sort Of fellows who
Wore their hair short and went in for
athletics. Perhaps they took them q
little differently from the way men do
now adayS. Whenever they wanted 10
get into a good, healthy glow. they did
no. punch away with the gloves, or
practice on the horizontal bar, but call
ed their servants and went out and kill
ed few people. l wish this were the
mode nowadays. OF course, it would
not be very agreeable having 20 kin peO-
pie, but 50 many people could be
spared.
We are told there were street cars
and telegraph wires, telephone and mes
senger boys in the days of Cleopatra.
Fancy Cleopatra receiving a telegram
from Antony saying he would come for
her 20 dine with him at 1880. In those
days the telegraph companies probably
managed just as they do now. So she
would receive her message at 7:10, al
though il was started at 3, and she
would have just twenty minutes IN
which TO rush around and dress her
se.f before her noble lord arrived. Then
Antony would hunt up the girl that took
the message, and the boy that delivered
il. and Kill them both. Nowadays, he
would not have that very proper priv
ilege. He could only write a letter of
complain; TO the company and the COM
pany. with its usual appreciation of the
rights of the individual. would take no
notice Of ii. And still, We are in the
Egyptian cycle.
Bah SEES a BALLET.
l am all the more certain Of it be
cause when I was in the city Twas taken
by one Of my nephews to see a ballet.
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