The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1896-08-08

Dukane-I never believe the thinos
hear in a barber shop. Gaswell-Whv
not? Dukane-It is all halr-sav~
Pittsburg ChronicleTelegraph.
Louise, where does the intellectual
exercise come in in playing whlstsr
"Oh, in getting other people to paw at.
tention to the game" Chicago Record
Mother-No, Bobby; money doesn.,
make folks happy-but I'll tell Won
what does. Bobby-I know. ma: ira
the stuff what you get with it.-Judge
Don't you think that Charity is a
queer title for your new book?" mot
at all. Charity begins at home Won
know."-Philadelphia North American
Mrs. Wickwire-Why don't you eyer
wash your face? Dismal Dawson
Don't want the sun to git a chance
to Spite me complexion.-Ind
Journal.
after all. man Is generous being"
ayes, he is; | never saw a husband
yet who wouldn't let some other man
teach his wife to ride a wheel."-Chi.
cago Record.
To Fit the Appetite.-"What do You
charge for boardY "Do YOU ride a
bicycles" Yes; what difference does
that maker 9TH be 81 more a weekr'
Chicago Record.
Reporter-Here's a bit of news tba,
Is scoop. City Editor-What is II?
Reporter-The shovel manufacturers
have formed a trust.-Philadelphla
North American.
Hipson-Layson is the LATEST man
know. Juggles-Is that so? Hipson
Yes Why, that man won't even
carry life insurance. - Philadelphia
North American.
Doctor" said the anxious mother
william can hardly speak above a
whisper" Indeed? Has he taken
cold, or did he go to the ball gamer
Washington Star
Generally That's the Hardest of
Work.-"Uncle Tom. what is executive
ability" ITS knowing how to make
other people work without doing any
thing yourself."-Chicago Record.
1t is not the proper thing to say that
a man will make a good husband. II
Is the wife who makes the good hus-
band. The bad ones only are the self
made artlcle.-Boston Transcript
He-"You should not worry so much
about dress Set your mind on higher
things" She-"I had set my mind on
higher things than you seem willing
to buy for e."-Indianapolis Journal.
He-"Oh, dear. wish / could get
hold of some good biscuits like mother
used to make for mer' She-"And
, wish l could get some good clothes like
father used to buy for me. "--Indianap-
oils Journal.
The trees are leaving" remarked
Mrs. Snaggs. Nevertheless. they are
not packing their trunks" replied Mr..
Snaggs, who objected to his wlfes
coined verb. Chronicle
Telegraph
Its terrible" he said. ito see the
way one member of Congress after an
other gets unseated" We'll" his wife
answered, lit serves them right for
giving in to the bicycle craze."-Kansas
I, City Star
8 Lieut.. Peril am afraid you couldn't
! stand the rigor of an Arctic expedi-
5 ton. You never have been on one be-
Q fore, have your Travole-"No. but l
= have spent n winter in an English
hotel.
Marry that-that-" She hesitated.
= NO word seemed strong enough to
; adequately express her contemp'.
I why. marry that-thing? Marry a
L man that rides a MISUNDERSTANDING
I ton Evening Times.
n "Bobbie, you are perfectly awful to-
h day; and just when grandma Is visit
:. Ing us. too.' well. ma, it's only to
I please you. You told me the other day
9 that you thought kept my good man
q nerS for visitors only."-Harpers Ba-
d Ear
I "But why did you refuse Prof. Grueb-
:, ling. Miss Melanie? He is such an abe
: aud noted mathematician. Ihat
just the reason! He would always he
automatically demonstrating the
errors Of my milliner's bills. '-Humor-
h istlche Blaetter.
3 Il suppose when you were In the
Il White Mountains last summer you en-,
: Joyed the echoes very muchF NO.
e didn't. l went to hear them Win
Charlie Hillard. and when they repeat
:. ed what he said they really bored me
= very much. -Harper's Bazar'
= Courtier-'Has your majesty read
4 the History of the sixteenth Dynasty.
(. by the royal historianl 1t Is MASTER.
: piece" The King of Egypt-iruiy u
n is, but he ought to boil 1t down. IL j.
II long enough to cover three PYRAMIDS
and he knows | can't spare MN MOS
than ne."-Truth.
Mrs. Wurrey Ito police cap'a.ip
IS Have you found any trace OF my BOY
ie He's been away all day, ana s''n
'e find out anything as TO his "ner '.
e abouts." Police Capabilities easy,
II madam. Describe the boy ana We "
= send a man down to the continuous i's.,
q Torrance thcater at once aud get nilu
for you."-Roxbury Gazette.