The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1896-12-03
-@nENN
1DB&zESz

Once the prettleSt girl ID the place;
But she's changed Il great deal
Since she took to the wheel,
For she now has a bicycle face.
-Upto-Date.
Mother-Johnny, why did you not tell
me that You We're naughty at school?
Johnny-'Tisn't best. to tell women ev-
erything.-BoSton Transcript.
The young man who is anxious 20 lay
the world at the feet of the girl he
adaassA three nNsltilS after he marrieS
her isn't whiting oven to lay the carpet.
-YsnSars Statesman.
"BiXby has given UP learning to play
chess" "Too much for his mental cali
berT" mo. he hurt his Jaw trying to
pronounce the names of the leading
players."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
at is shameful that the States have
to legislate about women's theater
hats" WHY" well it shows how
little influence individual mel have
with their wives.'-Chicago Record.
Artist hatter myself this last pic
ture Of mine Is an excellent one. An
other .Artist-My dear fellow. you don't
fiatter yourself half as much us you
f1atter the picture.-RoXbury Gazette.
This" said he, as he inhaled the
balmy October air, lis Indian summer"
II always maintained" she replied,
that the Indians were capable of good
work if given the chance.'-Chicago
News.
Smith, see that a bullet from one
of those new rifles will kill six men.
son-You don't say? In that case, a
man might just as we'll go to the front.
Puck.
BObby-Ma, you said that l wasn't to
eat that piece of cake in the pantry
because it would make me sick. Moth
er-Yes, Bobby. Bobby (convincingly)
But, ma, it hasn't made me sick.-An-
swerS.
Here l am" remarked the India
rubber man. But no one seemed to pay
any attention to him until he cOiled
himself up into a f~our-in-hand and tri-
umphantly shouted: Here l am knot"
New York Journal.
Little Ethel wonder why men like
to talk about their old school days?
Little JOHNNY s'pose after they got
grOwed up they is always tryin' to find
out where the teacher lives, so they a
lick him.-Conic Cuts.
"Mrs. Digby has a husband that real
ly thinks something Of her." What
has he done?' why, instead Of bet
ting to win a hat for himself on the
election, he bet a new bonnet for his
wife."-ChicagO Record.
A forced convert-"Say, Weary, wor
are you walkin' round in yer bare foots
fer" SIN trying dis yere new Kneinn
cure" "Wot fer, Weary" cause
some d%ingblasted snoozer role ne
shoes!'-Cleveland PlaiI q. a.er.
"This honey doesn't l'1i to be pure"
said the cautious groc y. But, man."
earnestly replied the ariarist, ait has
to be pure. You wouldn't expect a man
In the bee line TO be crooked; now,
could you?'-Indianapolis Journal.
Can you support my daughter in the
style to which she is accustomed""
asked her father. pretty nearly" re-
piled the sutton. "Of course | can't
keep up the engagement luxurics l have
given her forever."-Harper's Bazaar.
'I've noticed an Indian hanging
around the entrance for several days"
said the theatrical manager. do you
know who he ISL Il strongly suspect
that he's a scalpcr," replied the ticket
agent.-Philadelphia North American.
First Student-What makes you look
so melancholy? Second Student Il have
been fooled. asked my father to send
me sixty marks to pay my tailor, and
q few days later l received Thee
ceipted %tailor'S bill!'-FliegenIo Blaet-
ter.
Father-Wait a year, my son, and you
NAV feel very different. Son Conf
dently)-I've tested my love FOR Miss
Higgins thoroughly. and | know it can
not change. I've played golf with her,
and | still want her for my wife,
Household Words.
"Well." remarked the wife Of the
man who had changed his mind about
coming to Congress, you have a clear
conscience. anyhow" Il know that"
was the comfortless reply; but 4 clear
conscience isn't what l was running
for."-WashingtOn Star.
I'm all in the dark about how these
bills are to be paid" said Mr.. Hardup
to his wife. well, Henry" said she,
as she pulled out a yellow one and laid
1t ON top Of the pile, you will be if
you don't pay that one, for that's the
gas bill."-Washington Capital.
Mrs. BrOwn--Did you have a good