The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1896-11-29
JESTSABOUT OLOA6E
Americans Are Lacking IN Il
spect For Their Elders.
wlsoom or ADVANCED YEARS

Bah Takes Up Argument for Mothers
in-Law, Who, She Says, Are Ofiener
Mothers-in- Love- Old Maids Who
Are Angels Of Mercy to Jesti.g Man
--How "r4 rry's" lite Insurance was
Squandered--The Nineteenth Ger
fury Man,
Did it ever strike you that as a nation,
we demanded a rather mean sort of fun?
The joke in the newspapers, or at the
theater, that causes the widest laughter
is that directed at somebody's mother-in-
law, at an old maid, or at somebody who
is not young in years. The American
generalizing is wonderfully lacking in
respect He forgets that there is no old
maid (how abominabie that phrase isl
who could not have married had she wish
ed. He forgets that when sickness, sor-
row. or death comes TO the household 1t is
the kindly old maid to whom he turns,
not only for sympathy, but for active
help. He forgets that, when the mother
Of his children died, it was the old maid
aunt, or the old maid sister who took
care OF them, who taught them to love
him, and who trained them to be "A credit
to his name He forgets all about this,
and thinks it is no more than she ought
to do, because she has no family of her
own. But who does everything he ought
to do? | have an idea that when that
man, and his number is many, is wander
ing around the gates of heaven, praying
for admission, he will be surprised at
the number of old maids securely seated
therein And he will be more surprised
when. of their Unselfshness, they send
up supplication for him.
The stupid looking man who tells, with
great glee, joke about a mother-in-
law never stops to think how often moth
ers-in-law are really mothers-in-love.
How many men have been helped along
in their business by their wives moth
ers? How many men would find their
dinners much less attractive if it were
not for the mothers of their wiyesE And
how many men, when anything worries
them, turn as naturally to their mothers
in-law as flowers do to the sun?
BENEFICIARIES TURN J0KERS.
You couldn't count the number of men
mothers-in-law, and yet, these very men,
instead of curling their lips with scorn
at vulgar jokes about them. seem to find
such jokes most interesting. and most
witty And then. too, how these young
men laugh at the jokes about old age?
But are they going TO be young forever?
And do they ever stop to think how much
more knowledge there is in an old head
than in a young one? Youth seems to
think that il will always be beautiful and
interesting, that it will never need con-
sideration or sympathy; and 1t goes along
ieering at that which it despises, until
some day the truthful mirror calls its
attention to wrinkles and gray hair, and
some other day it finds that it is ne
elected for younger men.
Then comes the loneliness of old age.
A loneliness. my friends, that is too often
deserved IT, while you are young and
strong and bright, you trouble yourself
about nobody, who is less attractive than
you are, how can you expect to find SYM
pathetic friends when the days Of your
youth have passed away? Your old age
will be miserable, and your death viii be
lonely. Think out where the mistake was,
and while there is time give some thought
to those who have not as much Of the real
JOY Of life as you, and share, in a sym
pathetic way, Of the good things with
those whose pleasures are few.
LEVITY ABOUT MARRIAGE.
Life IS a game of give and take. Things
even themselves up even in this world
Then there is something else that you
think it fine to make jest of--and that
is marriage. You talk about it in a light
way; you laugh at its responsibilities,
and you see no reason why it should be
counted as a sacrament And yet the
bringing together of two people to vow
10 love and to be true through sickness
and health, through riches and poverty,
until death do them part, is a wonderful
act; one that makes or mars two lives, and
how do you prepare for it?
How do you chose the woman who is
to be the close companion of your life
your dearest friend. and your helpmate?
DO you make an effort to see her in her
own home, surrounded by those Of her
own name, and far away from the mad
ding crowd called society? Do you make
an effort to read her heart, as if it were
a book, where you could discover the
strength of her love, the certainty of her
tiQtlg anu Nl1C DCdAta VI A1I AdAbti Nv
YOU try to watch her behavior with the
little children about her. in order to fore
see the sort Of mother she win be to
your children? No, you don't look for a
wife in this way. You meet her at a
dance, at the opera, or at dinner party
Your heart is captured by her ability to
chatter, to dance to dress well, and to
have a train Of foolish adoFers following
her
IGNORANT ABOUT HOMEMADE
ING.
The daughter OF a silly mother, she is,
too often. educated only for a social life
and she knows nothing wahteyer about
making a home in which man can live
and less about creating love in which a
man will find happiness. Sometimes, after
her marriage, a good strain that has laid
dormant, will awaken, and the ignorant,
but loving wife win endeavor to make
herself what she should be. But this
doesn't happen often. Oftens, money
CARDS You as a desirable catch, as a good
money making, and one who isn't much
bother. Fancy noble-hearted woman