Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1896-07-28
HORACE COMPLIED.
HOW MIR. GREELEY srorrEp his wIFE's
SARCASM.

"Anecdotes Of Horace Greeley are
trIAe out OF date know" said an old
time acquaintance of the late founder of
the New York Tribune, shut some of
the best Of them have not yet been told.
II there ever was philosopher, Horace
Greeley was one. was pretty well &C
quainted with him when he was In the
zenith of his career, and couldn't help
noticing that there was q decidedly
original and philosophical streak IN his
composition.
And there was another thing | used
to notice about Horace. When he put
his foot down'-his boot was No. 10,
by the way--he planked IL down with
considerable emphasis and with the in
tentl0n Of having II remain right there
until he chose to remove it.
VI was present on one occasion when
he put it down. Mr.. and Mrs. Greeley
were In Peekskill spending the day at
my house, In company with several other
invited guests, and as Horace seemed TO
be even more careless than usual of his
appearance that day, Mrs. c., who also
had her peculiarities, spent the most Of
her time nagging at him and trying TO
make him toe the chalk mark of con-
ventionality, so TO speak. Every few
minutes her stage whisper could be
heard; Now, Horace, see II you eau do
this or Now, Horace, don't do that
''She objected to his pcrching his hat
on the back OF his head, made him wear
both legs Of his trousers on the outside
VI his boot tops, and watched over his
appearance and conduct generally like u
hen over a flock OF ducks or an anxious
mother over an irrepressible i-year-old,
and Horace bore Ii all mcekly and did
exactly what he WAS told, as II he were
a veritable boy, and expected to be re-
warded with an extra slice OF cake AZ
supper slime.
FINALLY a trip TO Iona Island. near
the western shore Of the Hudson 0ppo-
site Peekskill, was proposed, aud 1t was
while We were getting into the boat "a
large-sized row boat hired for the occa-
SION preparatory 10 starting that Mrs,
Greeley piled the final straw on the back
OF the patient and long-suilering camel,
rs IL were, and Horace put his foot
down.
They were the last couple 10 get
aboard. Mrs. G.. stepped carefully into
the boat, and settling down comfortably
In the seat reserved for her and Mr.
Greeley, placed her parasol alongside OF
her, with one end resting on the seat and
the other on the bottom OF the boat, and
then CHANGING up ut her big-brsined aud
carelessly philosophical husband, who
was about to step aboard, she shricked
"Now, Horace, be sure TO step on
this psrasol.
"All right = responded Horace, cheer
fully, 1t the same time obcdicntly plank
ing his foot down with all his weight Oi
the article In question, aud then coolly
seating himself by the side OF Mrs
Greeley AS If nothing unusual had oe'
CURED.
Mrs. C.. gave one glance o. mingled re
proach and amszement at her blissfully
unconscious husband, and then, without
a word, picked up the wreck of her para
sol and tiied brayely 10 smile With the
rest of the crowd-though noticed that
4 her smile didn't have that beaming look
to Il which indicates that one really en-
joys the joke.
But" concluded Mr.. Greeley's friend
IL have never seen more genial and
coutcnted man than Horace was the resi-
OF the day. Philosophy and good humoT
seemed 10 radiate from him in all di-
rections, and, strange TO say, Mrs. Gree
lev didn't make the slightest effort 10 re
press or correct him during the re-
maindcr Of their stsy."-Detroit Free
press