St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1896-07-31

perfect.
A Chapter on Surnames.-A good
deal has been said in praise of st.
Johnsbury, but there is one character
istic that may not be thought of, in
which it is unique, viz: in the number of
significant surnames.
We can say with Pride, and yet, with
out Noyes or Bragg, that visitors to st.
Johnsbury need not travel Miles nor
Waite Weeks for the "Powers that be"
to Grant them Holmes or Camps. We
can at once suit all sorts and conditions
OF people.
Our ecclesiastical dignitaries are:
Pope, Bishop, Abbott, Prior Dean and
Warden, one solitary Mum being con-
signed to the care of our only Beedle,
whose office is no sinecure. For their
use we have a Temple, Church, Kirk and
Guild Hall
In the social scale we have Kings,
Princes, Knights, Squires, Lairds and
Gentry, and Pages and Dressers enough
to Waite on them all and take care of
their Gould, Silver and Pearls.
Business and trades are well represented
by Taylors, Carriers, Gardeners, Millers,
mail Carriers and Turner's; Fishers,
Hunters, Chambers and Diapers;
Smiths, Farmers and Thinkers; also
Miners to look after Stone ard Steele.
Carpenters are plenty with Woods and
Forests to supply them with building
materials and Cars enough to trans
port the same wherever required
Our landscape is varied and beautiful.
Green Fields, Fairbanks, Little Hills,
Heaths and Brooks, "in many Poole
and Eddy" with now and then a shall
low Ford intervening. Our Rhodes are
excellent in every Way. Our Blossoms
Grow by the Woodside, and are Hardy,
though often exposed to Gales and
Floods or Snow and Frost. Still I'VE
have May with us the year round, with
its many birds-Robins, Pigeons, Cranes,
etc, in colors of Black, White, GRAY,
Brown, Blewett, Rose and Salmon tints.
The Great Scott" to whom such fire.
quent allusion is made, belongs also to
st. Johnsbury. We have fine Walkers
among our druggists, who are all above
reproach, though some of them bear
hard name, (Flint). This does not eff
feet their characters in the least.
In case OF invasion we can Locke our
Gates and see that our Armstrong Gums
have Ladds enough for Manning them,
as we have only a small supply OF Spears
and Blunt Pixies, and French Hornes.
Bakers we have in plenty, of equable
Temper, though one is undeniablv Cross.
We have Cooks sufficient for regiment.
Our "Cupboard is bare" sure enough
Bean Potts and few Bowles are the
only dishes we did not save our Bacon).
Ling and Rice constitute the bill! of fare,
with a little Sault and Cinnamon for
seasoning.
Personal appearance need not be ne
elected as we have whole College of
Barbours and can be sure of hair Cutting
in all Stiles A special "artist." Puffer'
WilComb fair Lockes or trim Bangs in
the very latest fashion.
We need never to be short of change
while we have such supply of Nichols
and Penneys and trusty Penniman to
take care OF them. II a Heyer breeze is
desired visit Somerville, where YOU will
find Steady Gales, and when fatigued,
you will find a substantial Coach.
We have also a choice of Wells, Cogs-
well, Caswell and Farwell-all of them
pure and supplied with Waters. free
from Reaches. Howe to conduct a
Chase with Rider is puzzle which |
must Dodge. leave it to the Wise, for
1t a mystery too deep for me.
Where teacher is wilde, there can be
no surprise at the statement that some
OF our children are Wilder still. Batchel-
ders are many and Husbands are few and
Farr between, but prospective Benedicts
are in the majority and steady Sutors
are not lacking. Our Pilgrim is gone,
but not forgotten. Our Soules have de-
parted and Graves arc our tender care.
Little excursions can be made to HYDE
Parks, Lawrence or Newton any Dav,
without leaving Towne, strange as the
Rash Story seems. We are not Slack to
mention that we have Longways and
Ihornes, yet we are Swift to proclaim
Liberty and equality No colored Por.
tiers in our community, but all are No
bles, tree and equal. Moore anon.)