Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1896-07-12

there tostudy the habits OF the bird. Some
times when l leave just after Mr.. FEM
ing has been particularly kind. he appears
10 have ali the colors OF the rainbow-the
peacock. 7 mean. not Mr.. Fleming. The
fowl Is a wldower. Several years ago my
friend bought him and his wife. and In a
year or so the brilliant couple had a bright
little son. and ditto a daughter. An an
cultured iliiterate dog. that had never
had the benefits Of n collegiate education.
dropped IN one day and Killed the bright
little son and daughter and a few weeks
afterwards the broken-hearted mother
turned up her toes, and hustled 1T to that
happy land where not only ducks and
peafowls have wings. but people also.
II was a hard blow to the bereaved
father. who had failed to insure the life
OF his cOnsOrt and little ones. Not day
since then las no been happy. His sobs
are heard continually. OFT m the Silly
night he mounts the highest tree in the
yard and proceeds 10 saw wood with his
voice. which needs grease. The nocturnal
canary Is intensely unpopular in the neigh
borhood, for he can be heard for miles.
and. as there Is nothing particularly
bright in his remarks. II becomes mo-
notonOus. and. TO people suffering with
insomnia, disgusting At daybreak, the
long-tailed lark descends 10 Mother Earh
and does business at the old stand. This
business, by the way, consists OF showing
the ROSTERS on the premises that he Is
boss. lie has long since convinced them
OF this fact. but continues 20 impress Il
on their minds The bird in question has
e. appetite Ike n Confederate soldiers
and eats corn by the quart. which. per-
haps. accounts for the huskiness OF his
voice. 70 might be argued that such
creature is a uSless ornament to society,
but IL IS not so. Mr. Fleming uses him
10 sweep the leaves and cigarette stumps
or the grass Of his lawn. The gorgeous
w'dower uses his brush Ike broom,
and when he struts along he gathers UP
the trash even as street cleaners garner
the citys bountcous supply Of dirt When
the peafowl dies Mr. Fleming proposes to
utilize its feathers for the ornamentation
OF a cigar-store Indian, who has shown
him many courtesies.
The late Confederate reunion, with all
its grandeur and gorgeous display OF mill
tary ana veterans. lacked those humorous
features which afford food for my re-
Elections. The city editor urged me 10 pro-
duce a column on the funny incidents OF
the parade. lie IS still waiting for the
article. The associations revived by tho
occasion made me sad, instead OF mirth-
ful and all day long i thought OF my
brave comrades who fell In Picketts
charge. while |, through some strange
fatality. had survived. Those whom the
gods love die young. What future
have before met There was, however one
grim incident connected with the affair,
which, while not humorous to those con-
cerncd therein, may yet be funny 10 re-
call. now that It Is over. The perspiring
party who went with me 10 see the parade
occupied seats Of a stand, which some
.nterprlsing worthy had erected on the
corner OF Adams and Franklin. Tho
place was calculated TO hold about one
hundred and fifty, but the proprietor at
tribu.el 20 us the compressibility of sar-
dimes, and proceeded 10 pack three hun
dred into the stand. There were many
protests. and as our numbers kept con-
stantly increasing, the murmurs became
loud and discOrGant. Finally there was
an open rebellion. and the occupants or
the fractional parts OF seats swore they
would suffer no additions. The proprietor
then besought the crowd 20 further con-
dense themselves, ard 30 evaporate their
feet and neither limbs. "Whct In the
name OF goodness do you expect me TO do
with myself" shouted an indignant ciu-
zen. as six more persons were crowded
around him The proprietor. in reply TO
this addressed the crowd generally, and
said, in oratoriCal tones: You would al
greatly oblige me IL you would sit kind o
boyy-Ieeecd." That was asking too much
OF us. We were willing 20 roll ourselves
I'D like bail Of twine but We drew tho
line on the undignihed attitude suggested.
Tho bow-legged man Is born, not made,
and so. also. is the bow-legged woman,
suppose. To ask US TO become bow
legged on a minutes notice, after we hah
paid 70 cents apiece for our seats was
like adding insult to injury. We just
simply refused 10 sit bow-legged-at
least. as far as l could judge. those near
me refused. OF course l can't say what
the ladies' did. Never in my life have j
snent q more uncomfortable three hours
than I did on that occasion. Every BODY
was restrained. There was no scope Tor
emotion. Finally the pressure became IN
bearable. one man, who had evidently
attended the baseball games, unable 10
suppress his feelings. cried out, Every
body stretch" and. needing no second in
vitation. the three hundred SUFFERERS
arose and stretched" IL was an IN
speakable relief. but OIL how horrible
even now is the thought Of those adaman-
tine planks.
The denizens OF Third street, In the
neiahborhood OF Main and Cary. awoke
one morning during the reunion 10 ma
their souls stricken with terror HANGING
from a rope stretched across the thor
ouchfara was large white banner pic
tured with the skull and cross-bones. ana
bearing the inscription: "REUNlON OF
THE HOBO VETS" TIE Hooos, be IL
remembered df Il can ever be forgottenD
were formerly gang or urchins Whoso
,,,.anls disturbed the neighborhood for
souares around. and frequently brought