The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1896-12-15
ABSOLUTELY PURE

hungry. 1 lad to cross some planks that
were covered with ice and before [ was
conscious of either age or infirmity [
was down iat on my back with nervous
prostration. Before l got up l looked
toward the house to see il anybody was
looking, but there was nc one. The
back Of my coat told on me aud they
said they wished they had seen me. l
am too venerable to be bumped about
in these ~ungraceful attitudes, but my
female folks make sport of me Just like
the Philistines did of Samson. / walk.
ed down town yesterday to the post
office and the rude boys snowballed me
with malice a~forethought. Lookout,
old man." was all the warming l got. l
don't believe old ago is respected like
1t used to be. l don't believe the boys
have as much manners. The legisla-
ture is trying to fix up a reformatory
for young criminals, and that is all
right, but the parents of the rising
generation should start a little one in
each family and then the big one
wouldent be needed. The main thing
now in raising a boy is to have him
graduate as a good football kicker. So
much Importance is attached to the
development of arms and legs that 1
think athletics should have a place in
the curriculum OF the colleges and
VIZ hSPotV Vi NV boy o bUdbolhR
is sent to his parents it should contain
his jumping and running and pitching
and kicking record, and this record
should have weight in fixing the hon
ors. While they are developing mus
Gle 1T would be a good idea to have a
rail-splitting and u cotton picking at
tachment in which the farmers sons
could compete 80 as to be ready for
business when the old man calls them
home. The apprehension is that great
excellence in kicking q ball will not
meet with proper rewards In after lie.
II we should have a war and the enemy
should kick balls at us we ought by all
means to be ready 70" them, but as Gen.
e"al Sanford remarked, "They won't
come at US that way"
Samson was a very notable athlete and
slew q lion and outran 300 foxes, but VIC
have no lions and foxes are scarce. I've
been wondering what we can do with
these athletes when they graduate
with all their muscular honors and set.
tie down among their unpretendipe
Tom Sharkey and Peter jackson and q
few others, have monopolized all the
business in their line. l had q very
strong darkey once who could get un.
der a loade wagon and hump it out Of
a mudhole when the team stalled, blu,
we have good roads now and don't need
these strong men.
But maybe we old men are n little
jealous over u fading laurcls. | was
talking to COMMISSIONS" Trammel.
about this ball kicking business and he
said with some emphasis:
vt ought to be stopped; it is a non
sensical business and Is dangerous. The
colleges have gone crazy"
But he frightened up when he begar
to tell of his own youthful sports anC
how he could outrun and ou.-wrestle
any boy at school.
And George Adair is Disguised, too
but delights to tell how far he coult
knock the old-fashioned town ball anC
how he used to get his ankles bruised
and blackened playing Skinny and how
many marbles he won at sweepstakes
II played fair" he said, "always toeC
the mark, but there was Jim Jen
kins, who always Judged and cheat
ed, and he is Judging and cheating
yet. AS the %schoolboy is so is the
man"
And Dragged some, too, for | wa.
the boss at some things. So maybe we
old men had better take a back sea
and saw wood. Nevertheless, Tn
bound to say the boys have run thi.
tnlng In the ground. BILL ARP.