The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1896-08-16
AS TO GOOD MANNERS.
They Will Not Make the World vfr-
tuOus, but Are n SavinG Force.

II. c.. Merwin, in Boston Transcript.
There was published last week a letter
from a stranger. protesting against the bad
manners which are displayed in the streets
of this city. Whenever he became entan-
gled in a crowd, he complained, people
pushed and hustled him about, TO make
room for themselves. with an indifference
to his feelings, both physical and mental,
which astonished him. Not infrequently,
he says. especially when turning a corner,
he would find a hand laid upon his sleeve
by some passer-by, who used him as a post
by means of which an impetus could con-
veniently be gained. In these statements
there was no e~xaggeration. For some time
past it has been conceded by all just per-
sons that Bostonians, when they go out to
walk, leave their n at home, If they
have any. No apology. therefore. heed be
offered for giving some consideration 10 a
subject which, hackneyed though it be.
really forces itself upon ones attention. 1t
has been disputed whether 1t is worth
while to cultivate good manners. Certain
people look askance upon them, as if they
were intended to cover up something bad
underneath, or as if good manners were
merely a form of either insincerity or of
affectation. Others regard them as of no
pIdCtlcdl Ndluts III II tIiaiiiPHdit i
has pointed out that Lord Chesterfield. the
prince Of good manners. never rose so high
in the world as did his contemporary and
rival. Sir Robert Walpole-a man notorious
ly blunt and rude. And yet there are GER
tain proverbs and traditions which indicate
that good manners are means OF usefulness
and success. Suaviter in modo has always
been considered the surest and easiest way
Of attaining ones object. and surely this
saying refers 10 the employment of good
manners? However, the moral aspect of
the subject is more important and perhaps
more interesting. Good manners have been
defined as the exercise OF benevoience in
little things: and if we look into the origin
OF them they seem TO depend both upon a
regard for others and upon self-respect.
These, certainly, are both good things. But
is self-respect essential to good manners?
1t must be so, when we hold that mere ser
Witty can result in good manners. and 10
hold that is impossible. The tanners Of a
slave are never called good, though they
may be appropriate. The fact Is. good man
ners impiy that the person who exercises
them has something 10 bestow. No one can
be courteous unless he has same dignity;
dignity is founded. in the main, on %seii-re-
spect; and self-fespect is possible only IN a
person 10 whom some respect Is due. This
idea that good banners are in the nature
OF "A gift was beautifully expressed by the
poet who. describing the graceful courtesy
with which the wine cup was handed about
by Balaustion. said: And each one felt as
il some gift had been given MIN. IL would
be impossible for a man without ~self-re-
spect to have good manners. or, what
comes TO the same thing. 10 give pleasure
10 others b. his manners because he would
feel, and others would feel. that his mani
festations were OF no account. They would
have as little value as the opinion OF an
imbecile.
Emerson instructed his children never I'm
their letters 10 abbreViate words of cour-
| tesy or of affection. your AFT. SON was a
signature intolerable To the philosopher. To
abbrcviate a word OF affection. as II IL were
| not worth the time required 10 write II out