The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-12-29

philosophy I'm IL. She said there wasn't
any; didn't pretend there was any. she
wanted TO know II there was any philos-
ophy IN my insomnia, and had to admit
that there wasn't rhyme or reason In II.
case of set thief to catch a thief
Il don't think that the quotation was
very pat but | tried the pan of water
just the same l didn't catch anything ex-
cept my pet mouse, and was rather sorry
about that. When / was lying awake in
the middle of the night the mouse made
~ seem TESS lonely ana dull tie used 10
nlhpie cheertully at anything ne cou.d
md, and was really quite companlonable."
Mercy! said Mrs. Gotham. Maybe
that was what kept you awake. having
mouse gnawing and squeaking around"
mo, At wasn't: for after ne came 10 an
untimely death by falling into the pan of
water, l didn't sleep any better than be-
fore. Somebody else said that If 1 would tie
feather Dust an ordinary goose feather,
you know TO the end of a string, and hang
the string from the ceiling so that the
feather would be about foot above my
face, and then lie there and watch II sway
back and forth as breathed on H. would
soon drop Off to sleep. Well, l said that
couldn possibly go to sleep with a light
IN the room, SO the woman said that
could hang up the feather just the same,
anu then imagine l saw 1t noating back
ward and forward.
Il thought I'd try Il. There wasn't any
way OF hanging the feather from the cell
ing, SO l tied the string to the handle of
my umbrella and stuck that over the top
OF the headboard. got the feather la what
| considered the proper position, and then
l put up my hand cautiously. to locate the
feather, and settled myself underneath ii.
Wen, | never got so interested in anything
in my lie! tlrst, would give a good strong
blow-breezy again, you see-and then
l would put up my hand TO try to discov-
or what the feather was doing You
wouldn't believe the tricks that feather
played. I'd be sure II was off In one drec-
ton when IL would be off In the other.
Then l would put my hand out at a cer-
tain point and try TO blow the feather
against it, Then raised to bat the feather
from one hand to the other 1t was so ex-
citing, and the fact that II was all In the
dark made II douoly attractive. But didn't
go TO sleep.
FINALLY, l realized that wasn't doing
just the square thing by my friends sug-
gestion, so | settled down TO let the
scheme nave chance. was really getting
sleepy, too, much energy, and down came
feather, umbrella, and all! / tried IL the
net night and the next, but either the
whole thing tumbled or slipped enough TO
let the feather come down and tickle my
nose and ears, so gave Il up.
II tried another scheme of my own In
didn't work out as well as l should have
liked. You know how soothing is the
sound OF rain on the roof? Well, my idea
was 10 attain the same end by different
means. / just lett the door into the bath
room open, and then | arranged the faw-
Gets so that there was continual shower
IN the tin tub. by the way, you see there
are some advantages In not reaching
cleanliness by way of china"
Mrs. Gotham looked puzzled.
u don't think l understand" she said.
What has china to do with cleanliness?'
Nothing at all, Mrs. Gotham! You're
perfectly right. ] was only--I was only
IT wasn't so bad. You know / haven't a
porcelain tub. Well, porcelain Is china
you see, 50, naturally l don't take my
baths in china Crnal an improvement
on The way l put It first) You see now,
don't your
why, IL thlnk--of course, know
=. .I.t.a -.
man anxiously. Not porcelain, conse-
quently not ch.na--oh, Welt never mind!
Talk about eating the bitter fruit of ones
transgressions she murmured to her
self.
well, I was going to tell you about my
pattering of the rain upon the bath tub,
I'm Inclined to think that 1t might have
worked pretty well, but a medical friend
of mine happened to come in one morning
| before ! had turned the rain Off, and when
she found out about II she made great
hue and cry about sewer gas. Said If |
didn't shut the bathroom door she
| wouldn't answer for the consequences. /
don't know that they had asked her to
answer for them, but she seemed to have
such sense of responsibility that | re-
| spected her feelings and promised to shut
| the door and put cotton In the keyhole.
II consoled myself by thinking that 1
| could turn on enough more rain to make
| II audible through the door. That night
| read until about midnight, and then /
turned on the water, turned out the light,
and turned in myself, 1t made a good
| imitation of a violent rainstorm when the
water comes pouring out ~ the angle of
the roof and falls IN a perfect Niagara
on the tin roof of the porch below. IL
doesn't do that way here, but 1t does out
In Oshkosh, and / was being lulled into
| the sweetest sleep when heard some one
| knock on my door.
What is it2 asked through the key
hole.
The waters running In your bath
room said the woman from the next
apartment.
- I know ~ replied calmly. It's a
stormy night
Il heard the wosuan whispering TO her
| husband who was evidently standing In
the doorway of their room.
." She says IL Is stormy night said the
stormy nothingl growled the man.
| It's as Gear as a bell
Tim afraid she's gone crazy, John.
Wen, crazy or not, I'm not going to
be kept awake by that racket. Tell her
| she's rousing the neighbors.'
.'Tm afraid to irritate her, John. She
might murder us all In our beds
"'Pll tell her. then! and he did, In LAM
S 6 stTSys &c as f S bs r na
attempt than IN the second. There ! wasi
| / tried to explain to them that / hadn't
| been sleeping for weeks and weeks, and
| that really | thought 1t was my turn; but
| they didn't see IL that way, so / had
/ to change the weather In my bathroom
night That was the only thing. OF ali
| that ] tried, that promised to be SUCCESS
! full. Everything else made me grow more
/ and more sleepiess, and I've made up my
| mind that I'll never try another scheme,
no matter what Il is
That's too bad, exclaimed Mrs. Goth
| am. u just now thought of an infal-
| Iibe method, and it's so simple"
What is it?" asked the western wo-
man apologe tically.
"It's only 10 tic your head up tightly I'm
red flannel, covering your eyes and your
ears, too It's splendid!'
1T couldn't do any harm" said the
neighbors couldn't object 20 that. Maybe
| Will try it, but l know 1t won't do any