davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
CINCINNATI FLYER.
Monon Route q q. n. b d.

M0nOn Route q C. H. u D.
The Monon has put on fast flyer for In
dianapolis and Cincinnati in connection
with the G. H. Il D. The train leaves Chi
cago, Dearborn Station, at 1850 A. NJ,
reacies indianapolis at 4:37 and Cincinnati
to Indianapolis, in four hours AMI forty
seven minutes, and Cincinnati in seven
hours and ffty-five minutes, This Is the
fastest time made between Chicago ana IN
dianapolis and Cincinnati by any line: The
"Cincinnati Flyer" is equipped with elegant
day coaches, the Monon celebrated high
backed seats, parlor car and dining car.
CITY Ticket Office, 2a2 Clark st., Chicago, III
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
Texas,

In the Agricultural line, Texas leads all
Cotton. corn and the cereals grow and are
raised in every section of the state and In
the central and southern portions sugar
cane and sorghum are protitably cultivated:
On the Gulf Coast two and three crops OF
vegetables are raised each year. Berries are
shipped six weeks in advance OF the home
crop In the north. Pears, peaches, plums,
oranges, figs, olives and nuts all grow abun-
dainty and can be marketed from two to
three weeks in advance OF the California
crops. Large quantities of rice are now
grown.
II the land seeker, the home seeker and
the settler desires to secure farm larger
than the one he occupies, on vastly more
reasonable terms; If he wants more land 10
cultivate, greater variety OF crops 10
harvest, with proportionately increased re-
muneration, at q less outlay Tor cost OF pro
11uction: if he wants an earlier season win
correspondingly higher prices; II ne wants
milder winters, all the year pasturage i0r
his stock, improved health, increased bodly
comforts and wealth and prosperity, nc
should go to Texas:
Send for pamphlet descriptive OF the re-
sources of this great state (malled 1ree).
Low rate Homeseekers excursions via the
Missouri, Kansas Il Texas Hallway on Nov'
ard and 18th, Dec 1st and 18th, 1876. d. a;
CHERR1ER. Northern Passenger Agent, Slo
Marquette Building, Chicago.
TEDDr-"I tell you it's So" Nellie-"l
say tits not - Teddy-"Well, mamma says
it's so; and If mamma says it's so, it's SO
even If it isn't So "-HarDer'S Round Table,
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
A Chance for Work.

Persons who buy 40 acres Of land st from
g to 90 an aero will be given work at $leo .
Land 10 located In Mason county. Wsshing-
ton, and viii produce fruits and oil staple
crops. Land also for sale ~ low prices and
easy terms on WILDLY Island, Washington.
One FREQ railway ticket TO each purchaser
Grand Central HOTEL st. Paul. MINI.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
HOLIDAY EXCURSIONS
To Virginia and North Carolina.

To virginia and N0fth Caf0Iin1s
In the months of November and Decem-
Der Homeseeker's excursion tickets will be
sold from all points west and northwest to
Virciuia and North Carolina at one fare plus
S2O0 for the round trip. For excursion
rates and dates address U. L. TRU1TT, N.
w. p A., Big Four, G. & o. Route, 234 Clark
st., Chicago, Ill.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
Tight-FittinT Jackets.

Tight-ftting jackets are slowly but
surely pushing their way into favor
again. We are becoming tired Of the
loose elegance, or want Of elegance, dis
played by the cape and it's marked
tendency to individuality bores us.-N.
Z. Son. *. ..-s..,.,. s. s.:.... =
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
ONLY ONE GIRL.

HEY were standing
together out OH
the .moOnlit ter
race. Behind them
in the distance
sounded the band
pl ng so + t,
dreamy waltz mu-
sic. But what
cared they for
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

MISS KEED1cx-''What IN awful talker
MIR. Gilley is, and how little be says when
he speaksl" Miss Kittish-"The poor fel.
low 10 troubled with an impeachment in his
thoughts."-N. Y. World.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
A Great Joker.

Mrs. N. Peck-Papa always was 4
great Joker.
Mr.. N. Peck-That's so. When
asked him for you he said: "Take her
young man, and be happy."-1ndian'
apolis Journal.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
Loft DosatatoI

Not Of worldly goods, but Of Ill earthly
comfort, 10 the poor wretch tormentod b
malaria. Tho felf soourge 70, however, shorn
Of Its thong In advance by Hostetter's stom.
ach Bitters, its only sure preventive and
remedy. Dyspepsla, biliousness, constipa-
ton, rheumatism, nervousness and kidney
complaints are also among tho bodily attic.
comes with certainty. Useit systematically.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

Ir's rather remarkable thing that We
can see through almost any kind Of glas.
but glass eye.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

WE think Piso's Cure for Consumption is
P ias Hn sprinefeld fls oet 1ss4
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

II AM sorry I bought one of those door,
mats with welcome on it," "Why so?'
''Some stupid fellow mistook the meaning
of the word and helped himself to it the
first night. "-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

''GIRLs like q mustache at first sight, y
said Cholly; "b4t with fellow-well, 1t
has to grow on him !"-Truth.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

How Ny THROAT Rrs!-Why don't you
Pixies Toothache Drops Cure in one minute
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

II DO not believe that I have . trua
friend in the world" $50 you have beer
trying to borrow money, too. have you2"-
Truth,
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

"Nscrss1rY knows no law" Being the
know the patent laws. sss
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

FR1END-"WeIl, Arthur, now that you've
started to school. what do you like besta"
Arthur-'tReceas."
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

''THERE are no jokes like the old Jokes
Said the humorist blithe and gay. T
"And the Jokes that now find favor E
Pleased the folks Of another day.
Philadelphia North American. 4
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

Mn. HoJAcK-'Miss Tenspot must be sur.
prisinglY beautiful" Mr.. Tomdik-sIn'
deed! What makes you think so1" s'6he
looks well even in an amateur photograph. u
| -fJfo
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

JUST try 1Oc box Of Cascarets, the finest
liver and bowel regulator ever made.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

CHOW ODD it is," said Pat, Us he trudgei
along on foot one sultry day, ''that u maj
never meets q cart going the same way a!
no is v'-Household Worus.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

"B111E was too much bent on getting that
girl" Yes and the f5Est ne foew ne was
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

CAsoARErs stimulate liver, kidneys and
bowels. Never sicken, weaken or grippe.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

Miss Abee e. Ireland, Of New York,
was the first woman dentisk
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
The Ladies',

se S; sssan 49, ss9: and gsrsst 80:
under all conditions, makes it their favorie0
remedy. To get the true and genuine
article, look for the name Of the California
Fig Syrup Company, printed near the bot
tom Of the package. For sale by all responr
sible druggists. r. ,@stf 2
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05

WHEN bilious or costive, eat a Cascaret,
candy cathartic, cure guaranteed, 10c, 26c.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
6OAu W DAu6SlSCSs sOS'
Halls Family Pills are the best.

MAu1-''Too bad, old fellow. the hanging
committee skied your canvas" D'Au6er-
my boy, with the hanging committee the
art is to conceal tho art':-London Figaro
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1896-11-05
I At Tobacco Spit and Smoke Your Life

II YOU want to quit tobacco using easily
and forever, be made well, strong, magnetic,
full Of new life and vigor, take No-To-Bac,
the wonder-worker that makes weak men
Over Eco. 600 cured. Buy No-To-Bac from
your own druggist, who will guarantee
cure. Booklet and sample mailed free: AID.
Sterling Remedy Co., Chicago orNew York.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1896-04-12
Hotel Arrivals.

Hawaiian. X. Harrington,
Portland, Maine; f. w. Jannson
and z. c. Tarbutt, London, Eng. !;
l.. J. Nathan, Wellington, n. Il. j;
f. Merricks, London, Eng; Mr.
and Mrs. j. w. Roberts, England :;
Captain l.. Ahlborn, Lahaina,
Maui; John a. Scott and wife,
HilO; Paul Jarret, Waimea, Ha-
wall; j. y. Mcguire, KOhala, Ha-
waii; j. r. Give, Somerset, Eng.
A. II. Fell and i. II. Fell, Cumber-
land, Eng; F. V. Warner, Eng.
T. Brandt, Waimea, Kauai; JAS.
Dunn, EVA; Francis Gay, Maka-
well, Kauai; Mr.. and Mrs. Ru-
dOlph Spreckels, Miss Joliffe and
i. L. Wooster, San Francisco.
ArlingtOn-A. Koebele, Alamo
da, Cal; Warren Gregory, San
Francisco; Charles Clark, Port
land, Or; a. w. Hobson, Hilo,
Hawaii; G.. Kempstor, Hama
kua, Hawaii; Mrs. W. ID.
Schmidt, wife and child, Honomu,
Hawaii; j J. Foster, Sydney; J.
b. Herlihy, Kahulqi; r. G. L. Per
kins, Maui; G. z. Coe, Wanna
nalO plantation.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1896-04-12
& COOKE, Ltd.
GREATER BRITAIN.

Find me man of the allied race
In his warm heart I'd make place.
A place for Great Britain,
A bold conception not too vast,
This bond of union that shall last
A view of the future built on the past !;
Call we it Greater Britain.
Greater Britain, what does it mean?
Grandest nation the world has ever
seen.
Sponsor for peace and truth.
No warrior, then, with armed oppres-
sion,
To disturb the peace of quiet pos
session,
OF liberty true the open confession,
This plan of Greater Britain.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1896-04-12

"Impute it, 1 beseech you, to no de-
feet of modesty if l insist little longer
on so fruitful topic" as that of Woven
Wire, that sublime combination of iron
and wood; that ready bringer of sleep.
Woven Wire Bailey makes these beds
right here in Honolulu.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1896-04-12
OSBURN-BURHAN.
A Famous Writer and Il Scholar
Quietly Married Saturday Night.


Quietly Married Saturday Night.
Lloyd Osborn. the distinguished
writer and collaborateur wjth the
late Robert Louis Steyen>on. in
some Of the latter's best work. was
married at Mountain View. Nuu-
anu, to Kathryn BurhanS. ia.y O.;
Berkeley, Cal. by the Rev AleXan-
der Macintosh Saturday evening
The bride. who is Il learned WON
an. Il post graduate of the class OF
zoology in Stanford University,
arrived by. the Alameda and was
given away by Allan Herbert.
There was neither best man or
bridesmaid.
The parlors were tastefully dec
grated with flowers and ever
green's.
Among the few present were
Mrs. Robert Louis Stevenson and
IsObel Strong. mother and sister
Of the groom, Mrs. Paul New
mann. Mrs. Bush, Dr. and Mrs.
Russell, DIR. and Mrs. .McLennOn,
Allan Herbert, Henry Poor, Rev.
and Mrs. Alexander Macintosh.
Mr. and Mrs. j. f. Brown, John
Effinger and wife.
The honeymoon will be spent at
Mountain View, and in May the
couple will leave for Mr.. Osborn's
home in Vailimia, Samoa.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1896-04-12

ITO every land with English speech, :"
You're one and all within the reach
OF this our Greater Britain.
Haste we the day, speed we the time
Our tongue is heard in every cline.
But a greater thought, yes, it's sub
lime;
Greater, Greatest Britain.
j. S. BAILEY.
The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1896-04-12
Soc.

This is only one quality, but we
have them in NINE different quail
tiles and styles, running in prices
from so CENTS to $3.50 pair.
If you have never worn the Son
nette, take a pair home and fit
them. You can return them if
they are not satisfactory in every
respect.
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20

Cages wraps beside me where they
could find me, they went of and danced
for hours and hours. For hours and
hours? For ages and ages, while with
cred away amid moldering mothers and
saw my charges through the dreadful
half dreams of such a state whirling in
the waltz, hopping in the polka, sliding
in the galop and then endlessly walk
ing up and down between the dances
and eating and drinking the chill re-
freshments that it made my teeth chat
ter to think of.
suppose they decently came to me
from time to time. though they seemed
to be always dancing, for l could after
ward remember Miss Gage taking a
wrap from me now and then, and quick
ly coming back to shed it upon my lap
again. got 30 chilled that if they had
not heen unmistakably women's wraps
/ should have bundled them all about
my shoulders, which l could almost
hear creak with rheumatism. / must
have fallen into sort of browse at last,
for was having a dispute with some
scrt Of authority, which turned out to
be Mrs. Marca, and upbraiding her with
the fact that there were no women's
wraps which would also do for q man,
when the young people stood arm in
arm before me, and Miss Gage said that
she was tired to death now, and they
we're going.
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20
Ccfchur, For Life.

When was boy. they spelled IL
"catsup," Int "caichup" will do fos
this story. The article Is made Of toma.
toes over in New Jersey. and has an
enormous sale. a dear old lady in Con.
necticut heard ct il. and. having % rep.
utation i'm the ncighborhood for making
catchup. determined TO try il. A bottle
was purchased in the village, and ON
the following morning Aunt Jcmima
started for New Jersey. Arriving ut the
factory, she called for the proprietor, in.
formed him that his catchup was. II
anything, a little better than hers, and
as she didn't propose TO be outdone nj
home, she wanted his recipe. Itwns the
first time she had ever heard Of q catch.
up being better than hers. The proprie'
tor said, smiling at her innocence, my
dear madam. ] cannot give you my
recipe, but il you will leave your name
and address will see that you get nj
many bottles of catchup every season M
you may want all the rest of your life >
She returned home only half satisfied
but the first installment Of dozen quar-
bottles eased her troubled spirit.-Nev
York Press.
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20
The Visiting Card Trick.

LADY B., Carlton House, Park Lane.
W." This was the address which an
overdressed, dowdy looking woman re.
Gently gave to fashionable west end
stationer to be engraved ON 100 visiting
cards and five quires Of the most ex.
pensive note paper.
The stationer. whose suspicious wert
aroused. communicated with the police,
with the result that n watch was set
and il was soon discovered that eycry
card and every piece Of note paper wers
being employed for obtaining goods and
money from the credulous under falls
pretenses. The woman was no mors
Lady B. than her address was Parl
lane. She was. in fact, man for whom
the police had long been in search
Pearson's Weekly.
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20
The Atlantic City LIGHT.

The Philadelphia Record says: 1.-THE
light at Atlantic City, which sheds its
warning rays at least 10 miles seaward,
burns 2,2O0 gallons Of oil every year
Five wicks are kept burning constantly
in the lamp, none of which is less than
Q inches in diameter. The wicks. like
everything in the lighthouses, arc oi
French design, rs the French lead the
world in such matters. particularly M
regards lenses. The steamer Armeria j.
kept busy nearly the entire year supply.
ing lighthouses with their needs, begin
ming in the south in the winter and
gradually working her way north.
There are many other lighthouses along
the coast Of the first order. like the ON,
at Atlantic City, which il known Il
mariners rs Absecom light"
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20
A SAVAGE MARSUPlAl.
An Australian Mammal That Is . Who
Menagcrie In ITSELF

An Australian Mammal That Is . Whole
Menagcrie In Itself.
The SO called zebra wolf of Australia
is also called the native tiger; but,
strange to say, it is not even cousin tc
zebra, wolf or tiger. belonging to the
same family as the kangaroo, the slow
and gentle wombat and the sly old opos-
sum-all those animals that carry THEN
babies in their pockets.
The eyes, which are large. are furnish.
ed with membrane, like the eyes OF
owls. and this is called the pictitatine
membrane. This is almost continually
moving in the daytime, as the eyes are
exposed to more or less of sunshine.
without this membrane the amount OF
light admitted through the large pupil
would puzzle the zebra wolf.
The general color of the somewhat
short woolly fur is grayish browns q little
inclined to yellowish. Across this ground
color the black bands show up SHARP
and clear. These stripes are usually "A
IN number, beginning just back of the
shoulders. where they are narrowest,
ana growing broader and longer back OF
the launches. The skins are in demand
for lap robes and rugs, which gives an
added reason for hunting the wearers.
Two zebra wolves were taken to the
geological gardens in London. whert
they f1ourished and raised a family.
When they came, it was Thought Greo,
Britain would be too cold for them
but there seems to be no reason wb,
they should not thrive even in Canada
as they have been known to live on the
mountains Of Tasmania, $500 fee,
above the sea level, where the prouud i,
sometimes covered with snow for man,
weeks and frosts are severe.
Do you wonder that his name !,
slightly mixed? The marvel is that h,
is not named menagerie and done witt
it, for with his doglike face and shor
wolf ears, eyes like an owl, zebra stripe,
and a pouch like a kangaroo, his mixed
pickle beastship could answer to almos
any name You might wish to call him
When he becomes extinct, we can trul;
say we ne'er shall see his like again. -
St. Louis Globe Democrat
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20
HUMORS CT WHIST.
Eemarks That Have Ecen Madc Around
the Table.

Remarks That Have Ecen Mado Around
the Table.
A good story is told Of a lawyer in
Chicago who considered himself a great
authority on whist. He wrote book on
the subject, and ssnt it to a famous Mil
waukee player for his opinion of it. In
about a week the book was returned to
him, with the following letter:
MY DEAR SIR-Your favor Of the inst.
accompanied by your book, was duly received.
have read it very carefully. It seems to lie
a very good game. but don't think it is as
good game as whist. Sincerely yours,
1t is no unusual thing to hear a play
er at whist remark, after being berated
by his partner for very bad playing.
"Well, play whist for pleasure. He
does not stop to think that he gives his
partner anything but pleasure. Such
players cause their partners many "un
mauvais quart d'heure." 1t might be
a great pleasure" for novice to play
duet on the piano with Paderewski.
One can readily imagine how much
pleasure" Paderewski would find in
the performance. If q man wants to
play whist, he should study the books
and familiarize himself with them be-
fore inflicting his play ON partner who
knows anything Of the game, or else de-
vote his great mind to dominos
1t is related Of one of these gentry
that, after hand at whist, his partner
asked him, "Why in thunder didn't you
trump that queen Of clubs?" He naive
" replied, "Why, I only had one little
trump" Sometimes, as in this case, the
humor-unknown to the perpetrator-
carries off the bad feeling engendered
by his horrid mistakes and ignorance
1t is SO easy. if one would devote lit
tie time and ordinary intelligence to
the study of the game, to learn to play
fairly good game of whist
-Four players started game of whist
not long since, noted wit being one OF
them. He was dealing and made mis-.
deal He dropped his cards and burst
into laughter. "That reminds me, " said
he. "of my dear old friend. Judge Peck
ham, father Of the present Judge. Ht
was a great whist player of the 'oli
school and had scant patience with &
poor player. I was passing the cardroon
one day and met one of the poorest play
ers in the club coming out. Have yor
been playing whist?' asked. Yes, sait
he. Who was your partner?' 'Judg,
Peckham.' he replied. Did he pitcl
into you pretty strong?' NO, indeed
He only made one remark. I was deal
ing and made a misdeal. The judg'
said, "Why, you fool, you don't evel
know how to dealp' This is the onl,
remark he made during the entir'
| game. "-Washington Star.
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20

Send your address TO H. e. Buck.
lin d Co., Chicago. and get . fres
sample box Of DIR. Kings New Life
Pills. A trial will convince you OF
their merits. These pills are easy in
action and are particularly effective
in the cure Of constipation and sick
headache. For malaria and liver
troubles they have been proved in
valuable. They are guaranteed to be
perfectly free from every deleterious
substance and to be purely vegetable.
They do not weaken by their sction,
but by giving tone to stomach and
bowels greatly invigorate the sys.
tenn. Regular size Is cents per box.
Sold by Hartz 4 Ullemeyer, drug
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20
A Geutlcmauly Judee.

In q conversation the other day Dis.
trict Attorney Graham told of his 25
years experience at the bar with the
late Judge Allison, and incidentally
paid q sterling compliment to the dead
jurist. HE was," said Mr. Graham.
"a splendid judge, with a stock of pa.
thence that was inexhaustible. No law.
yer can say that 10 was ever turned
away from Judge Allison's bar without
q kindly, courteous. complete hearing.
His bearing both ON and of the bench
reminded me always of a passage in
David Copperteld,' where Dickens
writes in effect that "A man might as.
sume q gentlemanly demeanor for ar
occasion. but it is only natures true
nobleman who never lays it aside. -
Philadelphia Record.
Rock Island Argus., 1896-11-20

DR.. Williams Indian Pile Ointment
will cure blind, bleeding, liberated
and itching piles. II absorbs the
tumors3 sllays the itching at once,
acts - . poultice. gives instant re-
relief. DR.. WiIliams' Indian Pile
Ointment 10 prepared only for piles
and itching Of the private parts. and
nothing else. Every box 10 guaran.
teed. Sold BY druggists. sent b.
mail for SO cents and el per boz.
WILLIAMS A'I'e Co.. ProPs., Clevs
land. Ohio. For sale By sil drug.
giOto.