The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-06-28

art OF dignihed bowling is unknown. and
the less dignity there is in everyday life
the greater is our state of immortality,
Personally, I am a believer in the old
fashioned courtesy on the part OF lady
and a deep and respectful bow, culminat-
ing in "a kissing of the hand, on the part
Of a gentleman. II is true that TO accom-
plish this the entire sidewalk would be
required for a few minutes, but If polite
ness could cause n stOppage of the gem
eral vulgar rush much would be gained.
You who give the careless bow, how
would you like to live in Tonga? There,
if you visit the king, you PROSTATE
yourself before him, lift his foot and put
1t on your own neck. Let us be
thankful that we are not Tonga
nese. However there are, worse things
than bowling before, the king Of
Tonga, for in another part Of Africa, in
asking a favor of the king. one has to
stretch ones self upon the earth, striking
the position commonly known as that of a
founder. and lay chewing the dust until
his giglets. with his lay rick cad Of
air" says. Arise, fair maiden" or
something that answers the same thing.
In Asia, when one gentleman calls on
another, the visitor throws himself in
front of his host and chews grass. This
is supposed to mean that We are all mdue
of the same kind of dust and that grass
we are and unto grass we viii return. IN
the southern part of Africa, when mat
ron meets the gentleman who is her lord
and master, she falls nat, Kisses the
ground three times and wishes him all
good luck. Evidently in that part of the
country the ladies don't amount TO much,
or else they wouldn't be wasting their
kisses on the ground. Somebody says
that in Loango, wives dare not speak to
their husbands except upon their bare
knees, and when they meet the dutful
wives slowly creep toward them on all
fours. That IS a nice state of affairs!
Fancy doing the all-fOurs act TO the aver
age Johnny In ancient Peru, only a
chief had the privilege, the doubtful priv
ilege. of kissing the hands and feet and
licking the knees Of the king I can now
understand why, N Peruvian history there
were so few chiefs.
The Greeks, who were never undignifed
saluted the god in favor by standing and
raising their hands to heaven. A Japanese
gentleman when paying a visit leaves his
shoes at the door aud makes eight genu-
Elections before you, while. If you are Wis
ting in Arabia and go out TO buy a paper
of hairpins and meet an Arabian friend Of
yours, you shake hands with him ten
times, and each time say "hOw art thOuy'
The Arabian form is a little wearing and
tends 10 make the hands larger or smaller,
according TO your popularity and the
number OF your acquaintance. But re-
ally and truly, there Is no dignity in the
average salutatiOn Men scOwl as If
raising their hats were a bother and
women assume an artificial smile that
deceives nobody and give a bob Of their
heads that is lacking in all grace.
We had a fire in our neighborhood not
long ago-not much of a fire, but an awful
lot of excitement And this answered just
as well. Everything feminine appeared
in its nightclothes, while everything mas
culine put on its trousers ana shoes be-
fore making its debut. Personally, haY-
ing my insurance policy in my hand and
my dispatch box In the other and a small
dog on the chain, feared neither firemen
nor policemen, but sailed across the street
toward the nearest hotel in the usual get
up of an American woman at 2 o'clock
IN the morning and with a consciousness
OF great bravery. From my youth up
have been taught to dress with a fire in
view at night, and now l see the wisdom
or II. There were women hideous in mus
I'm nightdresses and curl papers; there
We're other women more hideOus in fan
mel nightgowns and crmping pins but our
household looked as If we had posed for
that fire and knew all about it before hand
First went the lady who presides over the
kitchen in a retiring robe woven by her
self during the long days which she spent
in the county of Sligo, and which fitted
her after the fashion of a meal bag. She
carried two white aprons and a sponge
which she had picked up in the hall. Aft
er her came my maternal parent.
won't describe her dress but / may saw
that she clutched the keys with great
Valor and brought with her for future use
a bottle of cough syrup. The lady on the
floor above us endeaVored fo dress ber-
self; she got as far as her flannel petit
coat, and then she put on a Jersey and a
sailor hat, and had for ornaments a bird
cage on her left arm and three new tow
e.s on her right Her Oldest daughter
made no effort whatever at changing her
night toilette, but she kent EVERYDAY
waiting, that is everybody who wished to
be carried down by a fireman, while she
took her hair out of crimps. But the
funniest sight of all was TO see a girl cool
~ arrayed and busily occupied in polish
ing her nails! 1 felt very brave for after
! landed in the street / yelled fire in
three languages and in all the keys pecu-
mar 10 nigh soprano for at least a quar-
ter of an hour.
The boys had a nice time. They ran
up and down the ladders like cats, pre-
tended to rescue people, frightened chill
dren and scared old ladies long after the
IRE had been put out and everybody had
returned to his or her bed, furious be-
cause nothing had been burned There
was really no fire, but the wind blew a
window garden off It's mOorings and some
TOOL screamed fire and another fool turned
on the alarm, and in less time than 1t
takes me to tell it, we were all being res
cued at a great rate. There was a touch
OF the unique later on, however. in break
Iastlng at o'clock in the morning with
various friends, who had rushed around
10 see If one had been cremated, on cham
payne and sardines. Modesty and fires
are Incompatible. L can quite understand
now the lady next door didn't mind being
rescued from the bath tub In the ex.
element, one doesn't think of the gallant
l.
he becomes seXless.
There were more kinds of night dresses
IN that fire which wasn't a fire than
ever believed existed. There were low-cu
nlghtgowns; there We're high-cut night
gowns; there were nightgowns frivolou.
with lace, and there were nightgowns GOV
cred with Hamburg edging. There wer,
Vlrtuous nightgowns without any trim
ming at all, and there were depraveC
mghtgowns, that giggled with lace ant
screamed with ribbons
But there wasn't one like unto tina
which was assumed by Annie Boleyn, anl
which must have been the reason for he
killing. Hers was made of black satin
with a two-inch border of black velvet
and decorated with black taffeta ribbon
Just fancy sleeping with that! Oueel
tthzabeth's was usually of black velvet
lined with fur and trimmed with red rib
bon. But Queen Elizabeth was a virgil
queen. Undoubtedly, I repeat it, there /
morality in clothes. Il is easy 10 under
stand that hoOpskirts and farthingaIe
and high ruffs were all encouraged by tn
clergy, as it was believed that these sDe
cial garments protected the lovely maiden
Of the days gone by. There is a dreadful
story somewhere about Marguerite de va
lois, the lady who was descended from
kings and who married 4 king who was
little inclined to be rose colored and VIII
wrote book that shouldn't be put int
the hands of young person. A gentle
man from the country told her that h
couldn't understand how immortality couI
to- EN -