davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
CHICKEN IN A STREET CAR.

Causes Its Owner Much Bother, and
Finally Lays an Egg.
The other evening woman boarded
a cable car with basket. All went we'll
until suddenly loud cackling came
from her burden. The woman was nat
urally much embarrassed, and, while
blushing painfully, pretended to pay no
attention to the obstreperous chicken
which was being carried home. The
cackling continued, much to the amuse-
1nent of the passengers, who were con-
vulsed with laughter. Nor did they at
tempt to conceal their amusement,
which embarrassed the woman even
more. She failed to see anything funny
in being made the butt of fun for ten or
fifteen passengers. The cackling chick
en- seemed to have no compassion on her
owner, for she persisted in keeping up q
continuous noise, notwithstanding the
gentle shaking and the frequent "hush"
which the woman gave her. AS the
cackling kept up, says the Pittsburgh
Dispatch, the embarrassment of the
woman wore off, and faint smile IL
Illuminated her face. When the chicken
had been cackling proudly for ten min
utes, she concluded to open the basket
to see what was the matter. Imagine
her surprise and the amusement of the
passengers when she picked up a brand
new egg which the chicken had laid in
transit
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
RlANkEI MEN.
Entirely New Glass of Nomads sprinei.e
Up In California.

Entirely New Glass of Nomads springi.g
Up In California.
A resident of Ell Red, CAL, writes to
the Topeka Kansan-Sun as follows:
There is class of men here called
blanket men, They go around the
country in crowds and herds, each one
carrying his roll of blankets, sleeping
They beg from house to
house something to eat. They work
few days at time, and then go and sit
in front of saloon until their money
is gone. When Sunday comes they go
to stream and wash their clothes. 1t
is just dreadful to think men can get
so low. never thought there was any
good in the Coxey movement until now;
he was the means of getting large
number of these men out of the state.
'"They say that California is the only
state where they can live in that way.
We ask them sometimes how they can
forget their homes in the east and live
like animals. They say: oh, it's the
climate! Our preacher said when here
to tea: 4 believe more people will go
to hell from California than from any
other place, and it is all the fault of the
climate There are hundreds and hum
dreds of these men wandering from one
part of the state to another. They beg
for bread and work for whisky"
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
AGED swAlN's SUIT.
Giddy Widow of Seventy Summers Pla
False with Ifa Arection..

Giddy Widow of Seventy Summers Plays
False with His Affections.
A case out of the usual order was on
trial the other day before the Vernon
county circuit court of Missouri. E. w.
Clark is suing Mrs. Caroline Simmons
for breach of promise, setting his dam.
ages at $4,000. Clark is SO years old
and Mrs. Simmons is 10. She owns a
line farm in Vernon county and has been
married three times. Clark states that
he gained her consent last winter, at
the time she was Mrs. Harrison, to wed
him on March 81, but when he went to
get the marriage license he was con-
fronted with a letter from her, in the
hands of the county recorder, instruct
ing the recorder not to issue the license.
About two weeks later she married Mr..
Simmons. The jury trying the case was
out is minutes and returned a verdict
for the defendant.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
AMERICAN TRADE.
Novel Plan of a Consul for In
creasine Our Exports.
Would Have Manufacturers Formulate
Questions Relative to Their Business for
Our Foreign Representatives to AM
swer-Would Act as Agents.

Some thoughtful suggestions Of con-
siderable interest to American export
ars, have been made to the state depart
Inent by z. w. S. Tingle, United States
consul ut Brunswick, Germany, in the
form of a report. The basis on which
Mr.. Tingle proceeds is cooperation be-
tween manufacturers in the United
States and our consuls abroad.
The present system of consular re-
ports, where the consul writes about
whatever he pleases, which may or
may not be of value to American man
ufacturers, is not the best, according
to Mr.. Tingle. In showing how this
state of affairs may be remedied, Mr..
Tingle makes himself understood
through an exemple of the furniture
trade. He suggests that the Furniture
Manufacturers association should come
together, formulate series of ques-
tions smbodying every particular in
which it's members desire information
and send these questions to the depart
ment of state. The department could
then call upon its consuls for answers
and the information obtained could be
printed and furnished to the associa-
ton requesting it. Should the associa-
ton find that reasonable opportunity
exists in the countries named for the
extension of their products, says Mr..
Tingle, let them SO inform the depart
-ncnt, which could then authorize the
consuls of the chief places in the indi-
Gated country to hire permanently a
commodious exhibit room in the bust
ness center of the city, it's cost to be de-
frayed by charging each manufacture
srs association concerned reasonable
sum for the service. Each consul could
invite dealers and others interested in
the particular line of trade exhibited
to inspect the articles on given day, at
which, with the data furnished by the
association, he could make brief adj
dress explanatory of the salient fea-
lures and advantages of the goods in
question. A conference could then be
held and suggestions be made to the
consul and such changes as would oc-
cur to him could be embodied in a
supplemental report to the department.
In conclusion the consul could put the
individual dealers in possession of the
addresses of every individual firm com
posing the association and the matter
could then be conducted between the
local dealers and such one of the firm
as he might select.
Mr.. Jingle thinks that tremendous
impetus would be given to the export
of American goods, and in conclusion
he says:
"The opportunity is there. The ma
chinery is in existence; it requires but
little to put it in motion, but will the
manufacturers of the United States
bring to bear thatlittlc? Itisaquestion
that they alone can ansue,n
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10

More Understanding bonds. more
indebtedness, and more redemp ton
in gold. Why doesn't the U. S. turn
loose the 800, 100000 silver dollars said
to be stored there, if n silver dollar
Z is as good as a gold dollar, which sill
5dollar-tors claim is the case? A
so. States bond, pnrchasable with
.azsssd and redeemable III silver; could
not be negotiated in any money mar
ket on the globe. When it comes to
large transactions the cart wheels are
not in il. Iowa Postal Card.
For a compound OF conceit, stupid
ity and ignorance, the above is en-
Titled to the medal; if the Rothschilds
or their apologists in this country are
getting rewards of merit for such
trash. The United States have not
issued dollar of indebtedness of
any form except the gold certificates
but what are payable in silver dol
lars at the option of the government.
Mr.. Cleveland asked of congress au-
thority to issue government bonds
payable in gold, alleging as reason
therefor, that they could be negotiat-
ed at q saving of several millions of
dollars. Congress refused to give
him the authority asked and bonds
were issued payable in 'coin," which
includes silver equally with gold.
The bonds thus issued, payable in
silver as the administration alleges, at
the option of the government the
purchasers, the Belmont Morgan syn
dictate disposed OF at a profit of nearly
$40, DOC, 600; and had the amount OF
bonds been three times the sum they
were issued for, the bids made would
have absorbed every dollar, though
payable in silver dollars. and the
profit to the purchasers would have
been correspondingly increased.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
AT THE THRESHOLD.
Utah All Ready to Step Into Full Pledged
Gtofo

Ctah al heady TO step Into Full-Fledged
Statehood.
Anew York Times special from Wash
ington says: Preparations for the adj
mission of Utah as a state have pro-
cceded to the final stage. Jerrold r.
Letcher, chairman of the Utah commits
sion, reached Washington the other
morning, bearing an engrossed copy of
the constitution and a.certificate of the
votes cast thereon at the last election,
These will be presented to President
Cleveland as soon as an audience can be
secured by Chairman Letcher, Gov.
West, Commissioner Sherman and Del.
egate Frank Cannon, with other Utah
men and congressman who helped Sc.
cure statehood.
An endcavor will be made to secure
prompt action in the issuance of the
proclamation. The machinery of the
state government will be started on
the Monday following, and the legisla-
ture will be called in session soon after.
ward to elect two United States sena.
tors.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Ball Lightning.

A week or SO ago, during thunder
storm, lightning in the shape of ball
"a well-known but rare phenomenon
descended in the yard behind house
at Themenau, Austria. The ball, about
one foot in diameter, was of bril-
liant blue. On reaching the ground
it rolled along short distance and then
burst. flooding the whole neighborhood
with a dazzling white light. No dam
age was Immediately apparent, but sew
eral hours after flames burst from a
building situated at some distance from
where the lightning had struck.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
A MAsToDON SKELETON.
Finest spe cine of the Kind In the
World at Last Completed
Made Up Of Parts Found in Many Different
Sections of tho Country-Is the Prop
erty of Earlhsm College,
Richmond, Ind.

Something that attracts many visit
ors to Earlham college, the Quaker
institution located ut Richmond, Ind,
is the mastodon skeleton recently COM
pleted. 1t was the work of months to
put it in place, but the result is the
college has one of the very finest speci-
mems of the kind in the world. 1t
stands In the museum beside the skel-
cton of "Tippo Sahib," Van Amburgh's
big elephant, which WINS secured at the
time of the death of that animal For
10 years q part of the skeleton las been
in the possession of the college. The
bones composing this part were dug
out not far from New Paris, o., and
included tusk which was about II
feet long, few vertebrae, quite collec-
ton of ribs, leg, and various smaller
scraps. The tusls, except four feet
OF the extremity, crumbled into pieces
when exposed to the air.
Later on some fragments were OBJ
tanned on the Lloyd farm, east of this
city, and also a lower jaw with all the
teeth. This latter was from Nettle
creek, near Dalton, in this (Wayne)
county. Several years later the best
find in eastern Indiana was made in
southern Randolph county, where the
head Gladly decayeD one tusk, a per-
feet lower jaw, of extraordinary pro-
portions, containing it's full compile
ment Of teeth, about half the spinal
column, nearly all the ribs, the thigh
bones, and nearly all the bones of the
feet were uncovered. The Randolph
county find was purchased, and a
happy fact about it was it and the New
Paris remnant were SO exactly on the
same scale that the lacking parts of
one We're nearly supplied by the parts
of the other. Parts missing were SO
easily and naturally supplied by means
of plaster and paper pulp casts that
only IN expert could distinguish the
real bone from the rest.
The feet bones-about bushel and
half of them-wcre sent to Lansing,
Mich, to have the missing members
supplied. The dozen or more pieces
into which the great Uranium had
crumbled were placed in the hands of
Prof. Ward, Of Rochester, N. Y, and
were SO firmly put together that the
massive lower jaw, which was sound
and weighed nearly 100 pounds, could
be hung to it. 1t cost over 500 to get.
the head in good shape. The skull
weighs 300 pounds or more.
a whole fossil monster of this kind
is rare. One has recently been mount
ed for the state university at Columbus,
o., and the finest one in the world is in
the Warner museum at boston, Mass. The
Earlham mastodon excels this in some
features, however. being three inches
taller and having much broader skull.
The greatest height of the Earlham
mastodon is II feet inches, total
length, 10 feet 3inches, and the weight
about 100 pounds. BY careful esti-
mate the weight when living must have
been over 10000 pounds.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
A Cats Misfortune.

No cat in Maine probably had more
need of her nine lives than did one in
Monmouth store recently. The large
oat bin in the rear of the feed store,
holding an even car load, had just been
filled, when the cat, chasing a mouse,
went down head first between the par
titions of the bin, eight feet, to the
floor beneath. There she remained on
Ler head for 10 days, or until, the oats
having been removed, she was discov-
cred. Tabby is now alive and well and
Just as eager for mice as ever.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
pRooToR's PLAN FOR TOWER.

Inventors Latest Design for Lofty and
Substantial Structure.
For several years Mr.. Proctor, of Chi
cago, has been prominently identified
in the tower business, seeming resolved
to produce not only an attractive de
sign, but one well proportional and
substantial. The structure and all con-
nected with it will be more of
an invention than IN architecture
al problem. During the prog
ress of the enterprise many fea-
lures connected with it have received
careful attention, with view to per-
fection, and when developed will add
to its grandeur and attractiveness.
Special attention has been and will be
given 10 show on it the best results
of electric skill, and among the nov
elites will be new feature in hand
ling and operating the different flags,
thirteen of which will wave in the
breeze without the use of halliards.
By pressing an electric button they
will all at once unfurl in moments
time. AT shutdown by again press
ing the button they will disappear for
the night.
Long before the tower is completed
the successful working of the new sys-
TEN will be practically shown on some
high building. The elevator service
will develop many new features never
before used, yet the descent may be
made with perfect safety in a more
rapid, convenient and novel way. It's
location has not as yet been decided
upon. Its dimensions will be 1850
feet in height and $50 feet wide at the
base. There will be six landings, and
the tower will be capable of accommo-
dating 10000 people at one time.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
slayea Trcated ,Jn.tlv.

The former negro slaves of the Cher
ol1ee Indians have Jared better than did
tie slaves of the white men. In the
latter case they received equal political
privileges with their former masters,
but the ex-slaves of the Cherokees and
their descendants have recently been
acknowledged by the Cherokee nation
MS members of the tribe, which entities
them to about s1,3O0,OoO of the money
received for their strip" and their
proper interest in the unsold lands,
comprising MANY millions of acres.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Lumber Plant In Asbes.

Cairo, ILL.,, Dec. 3o.-The plant of the
Chicago Mill g. Lumber company, for
mcily known as the Wolverine mill,
was destroyed by fire. The loss is esti-
mated at 100000. 1t was insured for
$4,000. Seven refrigelators and three
freight cars belonging to the Big Four
railroad. standing near by, were also
DESTROYED
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Blazey Koszewsky,s rortItude.

While Tipping on freight train at
South Bend. Ind, Blazey Koszcwsky
missed his hold and fell in such IL man
ner that his right arm was severed
close to the shoulder. Blazey is only
six years old, but nervier than many
much older. Instead of fainting he
ran home, moving the stump at his boy
companions and shouting that he had
his arm cut off. His cousin went back
and picked up the arm while Blazey
was in the hands of the doctors.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Haunted House for Rent.

The following advertisement appears
in London sporting contemporary:
"A genuine haunted house; one hour
north of London and close tota faforite
town; four reception and IA bedrooms;
stabllng, lodge and park lag. Ids. First
class repair. Rent, G1OO."
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
HIS FIRST OPERATION,
Young Surgeons Experience in Cutting OF
Mans Big Too.


Mans Big Too.
"Do you recall the first operation you
ever performed yourself?" was asked
n surgeon by New York Sun reporter.
"Indeed ! remember it very well. l
was in hospital where there were $500
beds and 33 surgeons in charge. was
one of the young assistant surgeons.
If an operation was necessary in any of
the wards it WIS our duty to report it
to the surgeon in charge, who then per-
formed the operation if he chose. Ire
ported to my surgeon the Importance
of an amputatjon of great toe. The
surgeon came and looked at the man
and concurred with my opinion that
nm amputation was necessary. was
directed to get everything ready for
the operation. Then said the sur
geon, i will come and operate if can.
If not, you go on and perform the OPP
Grafton YOURSELF
II told my young associates of the
order, and they said: We'll, you go and
get ready, but he won't come. You will
have to do the operation YOURSELF And
that was the way it turned out. The OPP
Grafton, was to be at two o'clock. All
the night before was rehearsing what
i intended to do in my mind, and
dreamed of it in my sleep. The next
day could not eat my luncheon. My
hands and feet were cold. When it
came time to commence the operation
could only steady my nerve by thread
ing needles. said: Give me the
needles to thread. ] am very particu-
lar about my thread. took a needle
and commenced poking at the eye. In
a few seconds my hand obeycd my will
and became as steady as could wish.
performed the operation successfully.
After that | went on performing
great many operations, but it was years
before could take one o'clock lunch
cons if l had to operate at two o'clock"
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
His Status.

Teller-In his speech last night Col.
Windbagger, the prominent politician,
likcned himself to one of the armor
plates on the ship of state.
Grimshaw-H'm! He would have
been nearer correct if he had called
himself blowhole In one of the armor
plates.-Puck.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
An Empress Clock.

The empress of Russia has carriage
clock of tortoise shell, mounted in gold,
having the handle incrusted with
diamonds, and above the dial the i'm
perial crown in brilliants, with the
initial "a" below it, also worked in
brilliants. The clock was given to the
Princess Alix upon her marriage by
English ladies residing in st. Peters
burg,
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
What She Meant,

Mrs. Blinks-That horrid Mrs. Winks
says I'm u fool.
Mr.. Blinks-I am sure she would not
n'aks such an ill-natured remark.
Mrs. Blinks-Well, she didn't say that
in SO many words, but that is what she
meant. She says believe everything
you tell men. Y. Weekly.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Philosophy of One woman.

II don't believe whippings do chill
dren any good" said Mrs. Virgins.
"Why, l whipped Johnny at the pho
tographer's three times because he
wouldn't look pleasant, and he still
looked as cross and disagreeable as
ever.'-Chicago Tribune.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Pocket Stoves.

Pocket stoves for policemen are the
latest. They weigh only few ounces,
and the firm that builds them says that
they will make the force comfortable
in winter weather
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
A New serun.

Prof. Nocard, of Paris, has discovered
an antitetanic serum. If this remedy
proves effective in combating the hor-
rors of lockjaw, MS it is claimed to,be,
Prof. Nocard will have tnanortaltzed
himself by effacing one oftthe mostAer.
rible Affections which may,berall man.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
THE COMFORTS OF STYLE.
All EMIL.

All Full.
Applicant-Can l get board at your
house, ma'aln?
Landlady-No, sir; sorry, but we're
full.
"will you put me down on your list?"
Eyes, but thatis full just now!"
''Isn't it strange that your husband
should have sent me here 2"
"Not at all; he is full, too!"-Texas
Siftings.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Awaits the Procla,n.. tt,n

ST.. Joseph, Mo-. Dec. 21.-Allert Nee-
land, photographer of st. Louis, who
already has three wives, was arrested
here when about to marry tie fourth,
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
A Ml.under,t.n,,ne.

suitor-Beg pardon for interrupting,
but I-er-have just come-er-that is,
] have just been speaking to your
daughter, and she referred me to you.
Old Gentleman-Gee crickets! I
wonder if that girl thinks l am made of
money? You are about the 4Oth bill
collector she has sent to me to-day. If
she doesn't marry pretty soon, I'll be
bankruptcy Y. Weekly.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
L,ma. peru, to Hav. IL, rro,,.v.

Lima, Peru, to Have tho Trolley.
American capitalists have obtained
concession which will allow the con-
struction Of electric tramways through
The streets Of Lima
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Crow Ouill Pens.

For very minute writing, pens made
from crow quilts have been found to do
excellent work.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
Always in Stock.

Always in Stock.
Dyspeptic Customer-Thed doctor says
coffee isn't good for me and must quit
drinking it. Haven'tyou some prepara-
ton that makes good substitute for
coffee?
Groceries, sir. Our pure After
Dinner JAVA" ready-ground, at 20 cents
a pound, is an excellent-er-imitat
sir.-Chicago Tribune.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10

Faith is putting n,ckle on the
plate for u crown of gold.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
McELREES
WINE OF CARDlyI

will bring girls safely through the crisis.
Taken at the first indication of weak
ness, it never fails. It regulates the
monthly periods with perfect precision.
Its action is direct upon the feminine
organs that above all others, ought to
be strong and we'll.
Start the girl right. Don't expose her
to the dangers and fortunes of dragging
weakness, bearing down pains, nervous
prostration and the facilitating drains
SO common to women.
McElree's Wine Of Cardui, is home
treatment. 1t does away entirely with
abhorrent "local examinations.
Sold at s1.oo Bottle by Dealers In Medicine.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10

When the girl comes to be woman
look out. If she starts out i'll vigorous,
wonlanly health then it is pretty safe to
say she will be a healthy, attractive,
beautiful woman.
The beginning of wonanhood is the
real crisis in woinans life. Nearly
always something is wrong then i'll the
distinctly feminine organs. Maybe it
isn't very serious-no mattcr-the time
to stop disease is when it starts.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-01-10
How He Squared rh,ne..

How He Squared Things.
When Satan beheld with an angry frown.
The spread of the bicycle boom,
And how 1t was checking the growth Of sin,
His soul was immersed in gloom
But he rallied at once, and he jollied tho
girls
And got them all bicycle mad;
And then with grin that was devilish
quite
He invented the bloomer fad