New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1896-09-18
THE TAIN or THE DAY.

Two important pieces Of statuary are 10 he I'M
vciled in Fairmount Park Philadelphia. next
Spring namely. the Washington monument and the
Grant statue.
The Guild wife Reconnaissance. Golfers cot
tage. Wife deaving for the town. with basket on
her arm)-An' dse 80 think. John. that I've minded
everything I'm to sct When IN the io51 ~ 81. 90.
Of snuff.
Wife,Deed no JDhn. the times TOO hard FOR SIC
extrsvagancci Ye maun jist tickle yer nose VII
straw,-(tilasgoW News.
The officials Of the Natural History Museum. Of
South Kensington. London recently received a let
ter from n in this country Offering 10 sell them
the unbroken ash OF cigar with q small stump
adherng, for 500. The offer not accepted.
man walking by an Old graveyard N Aberdeen
shire bcheld sitting A wall an aged HighlsndfS
with hs head wrapped up in shawl eyidently -
said he You seem 10 be suffering from 4 bad hoast"
cough. "Ech. sir" said the Old man. pointing .
the graves. but there's mony yin over there wAld
be glad to ha' it,
II Fred w. Burke. Of Milwaukee is a prudent
man he viii soon begin to make preparations for
a lifelong exile from THIS country For he has
made a wager with Albert w. Donaldson that II
Mckinley is elected President he. Burke, will leave
the United States forever or before January !,
1884, Donaldson agreeing to do the same thing II
Bryan is elected
Strong Objection. There Is one objection TO
these sky-scraping buildings"
whats thatY'
the eighteenth story OF the new Utopian building.
His Wife two miles away see his office win
says he is detained downtown by extra business
he has to stand sta the expense Of leaving the gas
Mrs. P."-(Cleveland Plain Dealer
This advertisement recently appeared in an Aus-
tralan paper "Wanted-A man able 10 teach
French and the piano. and to look after the bull"
NOT BY TENNYsON
Talk. Talk. Talk,
Il the weakness OF ". j. r..
For he thinks that his tongue must utter
The thoughts that arise in he
So the eloquent Orator Boy"
Shouts 10 silverte gangs by tbs DAY;
Though the garrulous Populist Lao,
After all has but little to say.
But his tircsome CAB goes on.
And probably always will
Till he finally vanishes from the land.
And the sound OF his voh is still.
Talk Talk. Talk.
Till Novembers des we see,
But the tender grace OF his day is dead.
And will come back TO he.
IT told Miss Goghtly that | would go round the
world for her sake
What did she say? .
she answered that halfway round would co.
-(Chcago Record.
1t is quite usual 10 see in restaurants the sign,
seats reserved for ladies'" but there is a restau-
rant in Philadelphia. much frequented by women.
in which there is a sign reading Seats reserved
for men,.
Not at Home-Caller-Is your father al home?
Little DsughterWhat is your name, please?
Caller-Just tell him 1t is his old friend Bill
Little Daughter-Then | guess he amt at home.
heard him tell mamma If any bill came he wasn't
at home Washington Times.
Complaint is made that the monuments on Get
tysburg battlefield defaced by visitors. who
scratch their names on them.
with a Personal Appcation.-Mr. Meeker-Dd
you know. my dear that the scientists say IL
is the female mosquito that bites?
Mrs. Meeker-I have no doubt OF H. Prooaol!
she has TO support herself Will. her lazy HUSBAND
is downtown talking politcs.-(Ckicago Tribune
A large palace made of bales Of hay will be one
Of the features of the coming exposition at Toronto
Canada.