davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
HOLES IN THE CANVAS


lnpoee0at Discovery That 1aefoaoeo tAo
80caey of Sails.
An italian sea captain, Clio Batts Vas
allo. Of Genoa, has made very interest
ing innovation in the use of sails or
ordinary sailing vessels. He claims
that the force Of wind cannot fully take
effect In . sail, since the air in front Of
It cannot properly circulate In the In
Nated part and remains stationary inn
mediately in front Of part Of the sail
proper. He avoids this stagnation Of
air. - he calls II, by the application Of
. number Of small holes In that part Of
the sail where the depression II deepest
when 1t il filled. These holes arc re-
inforced like buttonhole, 20 that they
win mot tear out.
Trials made In various weather have
resulted - follows: With . light wind
: boat with ordinary sails made four
knots, while the new sails increased the
speed to five and one-half knots. In Z
fresh breeze the respective speeds were
seven and eight and hree-quarterz
knots. and in . strong wind they were
eight and ten knots IN hour. II stands
to reason that the doing away with 4
layer Of air which cannot escape past
the side Of . sail must increase th<
e5lciency Of > sail boat Where the
wind formerly struck cushion Of ali
which acted like . spring mattress, Dc
creasiug the sctual pressure Of ~
wind against the canvas, this current q
air now strikes the sail direct and, ol
course, has . greater efficiency. vas
allo has received much eneouEagemen1
from practical sailors - well a theo
retical Observation-Disclosures Rec
ord.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
EMPEROR AND ouMPLlNos..
Ferdinsnd Of Austria lnslstea o. Having
the Dish.

Ferdi.and Of Austria lnsistea o. Having
the Dish.
An anecdote which was current OF
Ferdinand I. of Austria at one time
greatly delighted his subjects and gave
rise to q common saying. One summer
day he was hunting in the Syrian noun
tains and WAS overtaken by violent
thunderstorm. He sought refuge In
farmhouse whose occupants were just
then at dinner, and his fancy was
csught by some smoking dumplings.
made of coarse -four. He tasted them.
liked them and asked for more. and
when he got back to Vienna, to the
horror of the royal cooks. he ordered
the same dumplings to be served up
daily.
The courtiers were scandalized that
such q coarse dish should figure on the
menu, but he now showed that he had
will of his own and persisted in graft
flying his new fancy. Finally the ply
sicians pretended that it was dangerous
to his health to be living ON dumplings
and insisted on his giving them up.
The hitherto docile sovereign stamped
his foot and declared he would never
sign another ofFicial document II hin
diet were denied him.
emperor ! am" he shouted. and
dumplings will have!:
To prevent = stoppage Of the govern
ment machinery opposition was with
drawn and his majesty clung tenacious.
" to his dumplings. Then the imperial
phrase became proverbial. and there.
after, when anyone insisted on graft.
fying . silly whim. some one was surs
10 say:
emperor l am, and dumplings I will
have!~-Youth's Companion.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
ssEM The POSTWAR PASSES BY.

z g1est that's always welcome.
3. ~ swings along In sight;
~ watchers wait. expectant,
~ eo@e new. unguessed delight.
- nay seems gfways darker,
sao0gh clouds had yelled the sky.
1ney miss his CHEEKY greeting.
tne postman passes by.
News Ae bears OF JOY and sorrow.
ana hate. from every land;
% knoWS when maid and lover
tnetr treasures from his hand.
~ ma lonely hearts beat faster
Mnen they hear his footsteps nigh.
Win nope deferred grow fainter
men the pos&man passes by.
xn0tgh the business man may Rrumble
men he hears his hurried slam,
Weu ne knows he's long been waiting
For that son of Uncle Sam.
SAno though bills. and duns, and state
ments.
Thick DER desk and table ny
kae W11 hope for some sweet message
1aA the postman passes by.
Ines say songs and tragic numbers
10 that leathern bag he hears,
ANA the bog Pandora guarded
Held but half "a many cares.
20 20 this gray-ccated Janus
Let us lift Z goblet high;
&aeelth and courage to the postmah
though he stops-or passes by.
0race d. Boylan. in Chicago Journal
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
No Kisslne h Sepa..

The women in Japan thoroughly dis
like to see n man with beard. Their
dislike msy be . reason for the uni
vcrsally clean shayen face Of the Jap
mnese men. / think il was in Chicago
that several young ladies warmly de-
hated the question Of boards from an
osculatory standpoint. the question he
ing, Ia u more agreeable to kiss . man
with beard or one without? kissing.
however. has nothing to do with the
Jananess woman's dislike for Q beard.
and this for the very good reason that
. kiss, ~ we underStand It, II an un-
known thing in Japan; not unknown
to the gay maiden Of Toxic. Yokoha-
ma, or Kobe. the demi-mondaines Of
that country, whose business II II to
amuse foreigners with their dances
and songs-but unknown to the great
majority Of people. A young man
never kisses his sweetheart. . wife
never kisses her husband, . mother
never kisses her children.-Nunsey's
Magaxiue.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
puNoENT PARAGRAPHS.

--"Baroness, have you heard IN
Il a secret, your exceIlency?" "Yes."
Then have heard of it."-Fliegende
Dlaetter.
Such a Question.-Young Artist
sDo you paint, Miss Dloomhunter?"
Miss BIoomhunter (indignantly)-"Nc.
sir, don't even powder. detroit Free
Press.
Art I'm to Date-"Ilas Mrs. Catchon
IN artistic home?" EYES; her pictures
are hung 30 low that you have to lie
down ON the floor to look at them. -
Chicago Record.
-Cawker-''The goat 10 nm impress
sive-lOoking animal" CuIaso-''I don't
think 60" Cawker-''IIave you ever
reflected what a striking forehead he
hrs ?"- .Ilarper's Bazaar.
--Watts-"There seems to be some
truth In the saying that Heaven helps
thoxe who help themselves" Potts
"Of course there is. They are the only
kind worth oelping. indianapolis
Journal.
"A Vivid Imagination.-Mrs. Cha HE
Johnnie, have discovered that you
have taken more cake than gave you. !"
Johnnie-"Yes, ma, made believe that
there was another little boy spending
the day with me."-Texas Sitter.
Might be Worse-Thc heroine tore
her hair. "Oh, that ! should come to
this" she moaned. "Well. you didn't
have to pay 10 come. - hissetl the villain.
with a meaning glance in the direction
OF the audicnce.-Detroit Tribune.
-Yeast-"Who is that richly dressed
lady coming out of that fashionable
restaurant?" Crimsonbeak-"She m
artists model" "And this eeedy-look-
ing fellow coming out of the free lunch
saloon:" "Oh. he's the artist. ."-Yon-
kers Statesman.
Little Irene entertaining Mr.. Moo
lle)-"Do you play very hard with my
sister Clara, Mr.. Noodle?" Mr.. Noodle
-"Play with your sister? Why, no,
don't play. Why do you ask?" Little
Irene "Well, she says you make her
awful tired" brooklyn Life.
Hard Fate-"This, ladies and gen.
t,emen," said the dime museum orator,
leading his auditors over to the next
platform. ''is the arnlless wonder. Sig.
Iiasil Bagstock, who was not only born
without arms. but is also deaf and
dumb. The great grief OF his life.
ladies and gentlemen, is that he eau
neither say anything nor can he sow
wood. Chicago Tribune.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25

There are from four to six grains
Of aqueous humor in the eye.
Homer attributed protruding eye
to Juno. He called her the ox-eyed
Juno.
The Journal of Insanity says that
''genius oftentimes seems to have about
It . touch Of madness. and insanity
sometimes shows streaks Of genius.
but the relation between the two il
accidental, not essential. II this has
l,een said before, it will do no harm to
say 1t again, as an antidote to the mix
ture Of each to which Nordau and Lom-
brUso and others are just now treating
the civilized world"
"A new mode of treatment for In
termittent fever has been proposed to
the Paris academic de medicine by DR..
Critzman. 1t consists of feeding the
patients with beef spleen and marrow
in order to increase the power Of the
phagocytes, the white c0rpuscules In
their blood. to devour the haematoxoa
that DR.. Lavedan has discovered in the
blood of people living in swampy lands.
which he believes to be the cause Of the
fever.
I'm the Caucasus NM. Sommier and
Sewer have discovered tracts where Q
fora Of gigantic size grows, which in
other respects Is like the fora Of the
valleys. A campanula which In the
lower regions grew to two feet here
measured six, and valerian leaf could
he used % . parasol. They are uncer-
tain whether the phenomenon Is due to
the accumulated richness Of the soil or
whether il marks the survival Of archail
giant forms.
California olive growers say that y
big demand has sprung up this season
in the eastern states for California
olives, and practically the whole prod
uct Of the state in already sold. Orders
for California olives have come from
ls.any old and conservative grocery
houses In New York, Boston and other
eastern cities, whose proprietors sny
that, now the Californians have mas
tered the art Of picleling the fruit, the
native product will drive the foreign
olives out of eastern markets.
AN Official report on DIR. Marmorek'a
new serum for erysipelas and puerpernl
fever will be made soon by Prof. Chante.
messe. At the Necker hospital it has
been tried in four cases Of puerperal
fever, with astonishing results. One
patient who had been given up recov-
cred under the serum treatment. DR.
rozzi. . Paris surgeon. il confident that
one of his patients was saved by 1t. Al
the st. Louis hospital they are more
skeptical, and wish TO see more cases
before prOnouncing on the value Of the
discovery.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
ne cLuseeD GEN. GRANT.

New York Has . Policeman Who Gave
Him . Deserved Punlshment.
Once upon q time Gen. Grant was
heaten. He was beaten in less than half
minute, and he made no attempt to
fight back. As q result Of this beat
ing there il to-day in New York a
trembling policeman. and here is the
story of the affair. Jacob Riis tells 1t.
When it happened he was . reporter.
THE Masonic temple was on me-
says Mr.. Riis. THE temple isonthsser-
ner of Twenty Third street and Sixth
avenue, and the fire happened more
than ten years ago. The fire lines were
formed. snow was falling and the police
were out Of temper. Along from the
the Fifth Avenue hotel there came n
small man, with his hands in his pock-
cts and big cigar sticking out Of the
corner of his mouth. He did not notice
the fire lines or anything, but walked
straight ahead with his head down. He
ran into the arms Of a blg policeman
who had tired himself pushing people
hack. Blank, blank, blank!' said the
policeman, do you take me for a woo:i-
en- Indian?' Without waiting for nm NJ
swer, the policeman seized the small
man by the collar and, with few more
blanks, brought his club with loui
whack across the small mans back be-
low the waist. The small man said not
. word, barely looked up and resumed
his walk, with his hands still in his
pockets. said to the policeman, whom
I knew: Great Heavens, man! do you
know what you've done? Do you know
who that was you clubbedT Nav,
said the policeman, 4 DON'T WELL
said, it's Gen. Grant and his face fell
almost foot"
The man who clubbed cid Gen. Grant
il still ON the force, and Mr.. Eiis knows
him. At present Gen. Grants son il n
police commissioner with the power of
hlighting policemen's lives. The police
man who dubbed the commissioner .
father is now wondering and trembling
- he wonders whether by any chance
l.is name or number was handed dovn
in the Grant family. He need not won-
der, for it was not, and Mr.. Riis does not
propose to tell who the policeman was.
Eesides, says Mr.. Riis. Gen. Grant set G
good example when he took his brief
clubbing like little man and walked
ON without . murmur. He knew that
he had run into . sentry on duty and
was pleased to escape 30 easily. Gen.
Grants son would probably not take
MS calm q view rs Mr.. Riis does of Gen
Grants clubbing, but 1t 10 not very like
" that he would be very vengeful. Re
Is mild man, not anxious for gore ol
trouble.-N. Y. World.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
SUNDAY BASKET sR,oAoE.

New Feature Of New Ys9k Street Life
ADDED ~ Llquse Law EnfoecsneaG
There goes the basket brigade"
The what7"
Basket brigade. Those fellows
across the street with the market bas-
kets on their arms. Know what's In
emf No? Why, beer jugs. wster
pitchers. milk cans, growlers Of all
shapes, kinds and descriptions.
"Follow 'em up for . few blocks and
you'll catch 'em trying every saloon
door they come to. An they march
down the av'nue they gather fresh re-
cruits. and by the time they strike .
side door that isnr guarded by a po-
liceman they'll be . big crowd Of 'em." !"
An artist who takes his revenge ON
Roosevelt by drawing caricatures Of
the commissioner for . newspaper
owns . silk hat, and, what II more inn
portant, a stout leather hat box. A
friend met him ON the street last Sum
day with the silk hat on his head and
the hat box in his hand.
Moving or going out Of town."
"Nope."
HAT pressed?"
"Nope."
"What are you doing with the hat
box?'
Got .growler' in 1t and I'm gong
to work the side door Of the corner
saloon"
His "growler" was large sized tin
bucket, not the very best In the world
in which 10 carry beer; but it fitted
the inside Of the hat box nicely.
This artist. like many other beer
drinkers, IL financially able to buy bot
tied beer and lay in . stock ON Satur-
day night to last over Sunday. but he
doesn't like bottled beer. There are
others just like him-many of them
n. Y. World.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25

The young American idea Il taught
TO shoot by means Of 7s3 patents issued
ON as many educational appliances. The
old-fashioned binch ruler or section q
rubber hose used in education 4 not
protected by : patent and may b
eRploye6 by eRd psdaeosue.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25

The railroad service In Asia Minor
= q romantic - the unspeakable Turk.
The Broussa Omciel relates that = short
tiuo since one o1 toe trains running
between Drousea and Non6anin 0toppeil
On reaching IN extensive vineyard; the
conductor and engjneer then went "a
cutting grapes, filing tin en- after tn
con, ard desisted only after . lose
alteEestioa With . guard Of tie plaee.
II = further said that at one time Z
train stopped to let hsakeman p1ell
up his toboeeo poueA; at onother ti1le,
-. 1T : passenger run boG& el4 ~
eqylg.Ah ~ rgyeg 1lueA
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
HATE THE ENGLISH.


The Beers Are vefy Bitterly Oppoeo4 -
the British.
'Take your goods away and get out
Of here forever, John. with the crooked
legs"
These words, according to A. Berg
man. Of San Francisco, who spent eome
years in South Africa, are = free trans
iation of q refrain in q derisive song
which the Beers of the Transvacl sing
at the expense Of the English.
~The haired Of the Boer against the
English government and Englishman
in general is very intense" said Mr..
Bergman. "All other foreigners, uit-
landers, as they term them. which lit
erally mesns Outlanders. are treated
very cordially. The English have
forced the Beers to make several im-
miRrations. Rather thon live under
the British nag they deserted the Cape
and Natal and went to the Orange
Free State. When England asserted q
partial SO. ereignty they founded the
Transvaal.
.It Is quite . number Of years since !
was there, but do not think the hos
tility of the Beers toward the Engiish
has grown less. They like the Amer
leans and the French. and are especial
" friendly toward the Germans, many
OF whom have settled there.
ssThe Beers are excellent shots. They
are great hunters. The principal ami
mails they shoot for food are spring
bo]ks and blesboks. Al these animals
are very timid, they have to be shot 1t
distances from $50 to 400 yards. Mach
practice has made the Beers almost
perfect marksmen. They picked on
the British soldiers, red jackets they
called then inohe last war, at long dis
tance ranges, and II the present trouble
leads to hostilities they will beat the
EnRlish again, unless Great Britain il
prepared TO throw . sufficient force
into the country TO completely overrun
II.
sThe Beers know the land hunger Of
the English. and they are determined
that they shall not grab their country.
The reference to John with the
crooked legs in their song applies to .
British commissioners whose limbs
were deformed. but whose name do
not now recollect."
M. Bergman was IN South Africa BE-
fore johannesburg had become : place
Of importance and remembeFs Barney
Barnato when he was . sunan broker
doing . tri1ing busineasin the diamond
mines.-Chscago Chruaic3e.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25
An The same.

"Have you any houncesT asked
Tony Pippin. with an abstracted air.
q he inserted his legs under table
In ono Of those quick Dispatch re.tau-
rants in Park Row.
The 1iuffy-haired waitress glanced
down at her plain black skirts, blushed
laboriously and said:
'What was that you wanted?"
"Flounees."
How'll you have 'em-baked, boiled.
shirred or bias7" the girl responded,
facetiously. She thought Mr.. P;ppin
Was given to repartee.
II want them fried with bacon"
Tony responded with some severity.
sWill you take my orderr
"Yes. II you call for anything ON the
bill. This amt NO Chinese laundry
Struck by . sudden fear. Mr.. Pippin
grabbed the thumb-painted menu.
scanned the oyster list for . moment.
and then said, meekIy:
II made . mistake. It's scallops !
wanI"-N. Y. Journal.
St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1896-04-25

A French chemist has obtained .
new substance somewhat resembling
ordinary porcelain. by the manipula-
ton Of asbestos. The fbers ofasbestos
are exceedingly Ane. and give IN al
most impalpable powder. From this
powder . paste n made BY the mixture
Of water, which h thoroughly kneadeti
and nodded into the desired form. ~
heating the article in crucibie to =
temperature of 400 degrees Fahren-
heit porcelain il otained With = trans
lucency comparable with that Of ors'i-
nary porcelain. An electrical expert
who has employed porous cups Of this
substance says that they have much
lees resistance to the electrical eur.
rent than the ordinary cups In use-
Sc. Louis Gl06e-DemocFst.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-11
There Want Nothing. q"

The following story Of excessive zeal
Is told by a young minister who spent
last summer in missionary work among
the Green Mountains. The two mai.
den ladies with whom he boarded kept
no horse, and were wont to rely upon
the courtesy of neighbors to bring
their mail from the postcffice.
AS the ladies' and their boarders were
sitting on the piazza one evening, q
neighbor passed in the direction Of the
village, and one Of the sisters called
out: "Are you going to the village.
JonasT"
YES" replied Jonas, pulling up his
horse; "can l do anything for your"
You might get our mail at the Of
fee, if you would be SO kind" said
Aunt Clary."
Jonas drove on but did not return
from the village until after the house
hold had retired. Shortly before mid
night the whole house was aroused by
a humping at the door, and calls Of
"Clary-Clary-Aunt Ciary"
Aunt Clary arose hastily, lit lamp,
and slipping a wrapper over her night
robe. descended and unlocked the door
why, It's you, Jonasv' said Clara.
what a turn you gave me!'
There want nothing" said Jonas,
as he turned to go, full OF the happy
consciousness Of duty performed.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-11
THE PRAYER OF colkeA

Another gone! Alas, one more
Deluded by a womans trfcki
Another stalwart bachelor
To figure as benedick!
"a marriage" see, "has been arranged
Between Miss Blank and''-yes. and
Harry!
Ny well-loved friend, you must have
changed:
You, of all men alive, 20 marryl
At Cambridge. on debating nights,
Brown and yourself snone in the lists
As valiant foes of "Woman's Rights"
A pair of stanch misogynists:
How valueless your speeches prove
Brown, too, l understand, is fated
To make, like you, the deadly move
Which loses all. by which you're mated
But. though mourn for you, my friend,
My fears are not for you alone:
This .all of yours, does it portend
like disaster of my cwn?
Is love brief insanity
Which seizes all of us7 Shall no men
Escape its ravazes? Shall I
Become lover? Abs.t omeni
Oh. Maud. or Muriel, or Kate!
Your name, from force of circumstance
i cannot definitely state;
Let US entreat you IT advance:
Oh. unknown maid whom shall weA
Let me put forward nv petition
Before you have reduced me to
A semi-imbecile condition.
When, on some fragrant summer eve.
1 VOW that you are quite divine,
And ask you simply TO believe
There never was such love as mine.
Despise such platitudes as those,
From my demented self protect me,
And il | finally propose,
Be kind, be generous and reject me
London World
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-11
Only Ono Way.

Insurance against the dishonesty Of
employees Is a recognized feature Of
modern commercial life. One Of the
great corporations carrying on this busi-
ness published an estimate Of the
amount lost in the year 1904 by embez-
dement, and defalcatlon. The total los
for the year WAS put at the enormous
sum Of $25 ,OOO.0 .0OO Immense as this
sum Is, 1t does not include the Losses,
undoubtedly large in the aggregate.
which have never been made public
by the individuals or firms defrauded.
1t is far from encouraging to note also
that this estimate shows an increase Of
about 81 600. 600 over the previous year
Most Of this kind Of stealing is done
by men Of good education, and at least
faAr opportunities for honest success.
The real cause Is the TOO prevalent
haste to gain wealth and enjoy life
without hard work-to get something
for nothing.
One Of the most valuable lessons that
can be learned is that everything worth
having must be earned by steady. hon
est effort. Henry Ward Beecher once
received letter from a lad who wanted
to find an ''easy BERTH" Mr.. Beecher
in reply, after warning the boy to avoid
the law, medicine, the ministry. trade
and other forms Of industry, because
each involved hare work, ended With
this eXhortatiR:
Don't work. Don't study. Don't
think. None Of these are easy. o my
son; you have come into q hard world!
[ know Of only one easy place ip II, and
that is the grave."-Youth'6 Compan-
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-11

the wall. Then the hen settled down
to business, and the servant returned
upstairs.
When the egg which was deposited In
the nest by the hen that day was gar
nered 1t startled the folks. 1t was of
the usual size and color. but on the
shell was embossed the form of q rat.
The body, ears and tail were all there,
raised distinctly, and as plain as the
rat which disturbed the serenity of the
hen. The portion of the shell that rep
resented the egg was slightly darker
than the rest of the eggs covering, bW
In other respects 1t was the same.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-11
A Neat swindiine Trick.

The latest swindling game was prac-
ticed successfully the other day at Ben
ton, Pa Two men, who appeared to
be strong silver and gold advocates,
were in the central depot and became
involved in a heated discussion. The
gold man offered to get a gold double
eagle that II he hammered the coin into
a shapeless mass it would stin be worth
$50. He was ostensibly taken up by
the silver advocate, but when it came
to selling the lump to Jeweler Roth the
store was closed. James Hagerty, q
strong sound money advocate who
stood by and who had implicit faith in
the value Of gold. gave the man $40 for
the battered coin The two enfhusi-
asts disappeared shortly after, and then
IL was discovered that the metal left
by them was spurious.