The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1896-05-28
Meaningless Customs.


toms often bases his adherence to
them upon the ground that they
have sprung from some natural
need of humanity, and therefore
have a claim to our continued allie
glance. The first statement is un-
,doubtedly true, but the inference
drawn from it is frequently unjus-
tiiable, for it takes no account of
changing conditions and changing
aims. A custom which was at one
time, and in a certain state Of So
'ciety, highly beneficial, may at a
later time, and in different circum-
stances, be positively injurious,
and the benefcent aim which once
inspired it may presently be quite
lost sight of amid other and far
less worthy motives.
Especially is this the case with
many Of the social observances by
which we are surrounded, and to
the pressure of which we are very
apt to submit without much ques-
ton. Take our social intercourse
for example. Its primary inten-
ton, and the one which would
still be urged for it's existence, is
wholly benefcent; it is to add to
the general happiness and we'll
being by companionship. Solitary
life, and even exclusive family life,
is narrowing and mOnOtOnous. To
go out of the daily routine from
time to time, to meet other people,
to exchange pleasant and friendly
greetings, to discover different
views and to realize different
standpoints, to give and to take
new ideas, and to create bonds of
congeniality, returning home re-
freshed and invigorated in mind
and body, is an undoubted advan-
tage to all concerned, and one
which, we trust, is often realized.
Yet are these ends kept in view
and accomplished by the usual ar
rangements in vogue in what is
called society? Are the rounds of
ceremonial calls, the crowded and
expensive entertainments, the con-
ventional gatherings of various
kinds SO prevalent among us, CAL
.culated to produce that rational
en- oyment and mental stimulation
which should be the result of So
cial intercourse? On the contrary,
do they not often miserably fail
in both these results, and leave be-
hind only an unwholesome excite
ment, dreary fatigue and mental
vacuity? Do not many persons
complain of them as burdens from
which they would gladly be re-
lieved? Yet because they feel un-
der obligations to what they con-
slider the claims of society, they
continue to go, and to invite 9TH
ers in their turn to the same kind
of wearisome festivities. They en-
dure care, trouble, discomfort, ex-
pense, not for any good or happi-
ness to accrue to themselves or
to others, but only to satisfy fan
cied debt to conventionality. The
end has been lost sight Of in a
multiplicity of means, which have
come at last to be petrifed into a
sort of social code, which few dare
to disobey.
Then there is the whole question
of gifts. In themselves, as they
should be, the sweet and tender
and delicate expression of affec-
ton, esteem, goodwill or SYM
pathy; how have they become
prostituted Instead Of being
fraught with such messages, how
often do they serve as a token of
the donors wealth. to be paraded |
as proofs of his generosity! Christ
mas, New Year and Easter gifts,
wedding presents, and even birth
day and anniversary remembran-
ces, have often no deeper or purer
source than vanity, desire for dis
play, or fear of criticism; and so
completely are they reckoned upon
and expected in many quarters,
that their absence is regarded as
an intentional slight. Not only,
therefore, have they thus lost all
their original beauty and meaning,
but they produce actual injury to
both giver and receiver, being to
the former either a heavy tax or
an occasion for boastfulness, and
to the latter more or less burden
some obligation, to be sooner or
later cancelled in kind Herbert
Spencer in one of his recent vol
umes, speaks of the customs, as
followc. "PaOn1a have created for |