davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
How He Works out His Road Tax.

The road hand arrives at the appoint
ed place, where the road work is to be-
gin, at any time from to 10 O'Clock in
the morning. He is equipped with an
apology for wedding hoe perhaps.
which he uses vigorously for few min.
utes, pulling loose earth out of the
bitches and placing it upon the road, to
be speedily carried back by the next
rain. He then rests two or three times
as long as he has worked, discussing
public and other questions, takes two
hours at noon and goes home early in
the afternoon, having done about three
or four hours work during the whole
day. Professor . H. Sheffield
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Tho Same Repairs Every Year.

The supervisors Of roads for the va
rious townships in Center county, Pa. :,
have adopted new methods for the re
pair Of roads. An examination of the
township books shows that for many
years the same expense has been re-
CURED year after year TO repair the
damage done by floods that are per
mitted to wash away the material put
on the roads the previous years Al
present no one is responsible for repair.
Ing any slight damage that may need
attention, and as result the improve
ment of the public thoroughfares re-
quires annually an excessive sum Of
money, due entirely TO negligence. The
supervisors, in order 10 insure a daily
supervision of the roads, have decided
20 hire men 70 work on the roads regu.
iarly during the spring, summer and
autumn months. Their respective town
ships will be divided into districts, and
. man to whom the contract of road re.
pairs is awarded will be responsible
FOR the care OF the roads in his district
and liable to any damages resulting
from the bad condition of the same
Philadelphia Press.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Looking For Good Roads.

The Minnesota good roads convention
held in st. Paul adopted among others
the following resolutions:
That a state road fund be established
similar TO the school fund, possibly di-
verting to this fund moneys arising from
the sale of LANDS given the state by the
general govern ninnt for an internal i'm
provement fund
That the moneys arising from the pro-
visions recently enacted as an amend.
ment to the state constitution relative
to the inheritance tax shall forI, a part
of state road fund.
That all taxes for building roads shall
be paid III money unless, in case of town
ship taxes, it shall be otherwise ordered
at the annual town meeting.
That all untaxed lands in the state
should be compelled to pay taxes that
roads and other public improvements
may be made.
That a suitable law be enacted to in
duce owners of heavy wagons to use
wide tires
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Rather Cruel.

/ know OF young man who has his
walls covered with the portraits Of pref
ty girls and women-some 900 Of them.
A few are acquaintance. but the major
ity of the photographs are Of actresses
and singers.
His fiancee said to friend of mine
the other day:
''Do you know, feel quite jealous
and heavy hearted when go into that
room of Georges. | wonder what he
can see in me, after looking at all those
lovely girls for hours at timer"
"Oh, said my friend, "some men
dom care for beauty in their wives.
And then, as the awful silence arrived
on time, she felt like sinking through
the floor, though her utterance had been
an honest one.
The maiden went away rather hastily
after that, and hasn't returned Polly
Pry in New York Recorder.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Speeches From Notes.

10 Is usually supposed by the lay
reade1 that the greatest speeches made
in congress are the result Of long prepa
ration and are delivered from volumi-
nous notes. This is not always correct
The preparation may be all right, but
in many cases notes do not exist at all
This may he i'',Istra'o1 from a tie
co"~Crs&uon | had wi n ext oncrcssman
Jol.H NJ. Fa; p:har. lie WAS booked TO
speak at q yeruion of veterans. Half IN
hour before he was Announced to t. ke
the platform | approached and laid
Air. Farquhar, | shall lie GLAD to get
an advance copy of your speech.
My dear sir, " he replied. Il never
wrote a speech III my life and never
shall never spoke from notes but once
In my life That was when was in
congress, ard my speech occupied over
four hours My notes consisted of five
words scrubbed on piece of paper.
have kept that piece of paper, and when
! have Joined the majority it may bs
considered an interesting souvenir to
somebody.
thought so too. Buffalo News.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Jesse James Bowie Knife,

Deputy Sheriff Mcclure has the bowie
knife of the noted outlaw Jesse James.
The relic Is i'm good state of preservation
1t is about inches in length, has the
ordinary bowie knife blade and has fine
horn handle, with solid silver fnishings
On one side of the handle Is a silver
heart while i'm the other there is large
silver star. Small stars also adorn the
handle On a silver bar the name of Jesse
James appears, beautifully engraved
The knife is incased i'm "a horn scabbard
that is mounted with solid silver The
weapon cost the desperate $50, but il
would take several like amounts TO buy IL
from Mcclure.
Ex-Shcrin Martin Agurre once carried
the dangerous instrument 1t was secured
years ago from Mrs Samuels, mother Of
the James boys, who at one time resided
here and who perhaps still resides here -
Los Angeles Record
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Nature No Sabba.ariau.

The Rev David Macrae has brought
together in "A most interesting little vol
ume. entitled Quaint Sayings Of Chill
dren," number Of stories, many Of
them old, but nearly all of them good.
There is one evidently told ill print for
the first time. of little girl in Aber-
deem who brought basket of strawber-
ries to the minister very early on Mon
day morning. "Thank you, my little
girl, 4" he said; "they are very beautiful.
But hope you didn't gather them yes
terday, which was the Sabbath day.
"No. sir. replied the child, II pulled
them this morning. But they was grow
IN all Yesterday.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
New York HoteIs.

The gorgeous new hotels OF New York
are not as homclike and comfortable as
the old ones, said frequent visitor to
town. The new palaces are SO hoaped
and Uttered about with costly bric-a- brac,
paintings and statues that the propretors
have to keep servants hanging around all
the time To see that the pretty things are
not damaged or stolen. One consequence
l. that no one feels az ease I'm them, and
there j. no such thing as privacy except
you lock yourself in your bedroom. To
hold a private consultation with friend
IN one of the parlors l. Impossible. unless
you do IL in whispers, because there is al
ways maid or q detective lettering near
You And If you whisper you become a
suspicion, character al once A wealthy
westerner whC dresses very carelessly made
a scene i'm one of these luxurious lounging
rooms the other day Whenever he went
into the parlOrS he was watched and fol-
lowed Either "A maid or man took turns
III keeping eyes ON him. a last he went
up TO the detective and ordered him cut OF
the room. Il live here, said he land
don't propose TO be Swallowed another five
minutes The man went out TO inquire
whether the indignant person was guest.
But before he went To the Office he sent a
maid into the parlor to see that the angry
man did not steal "a statue OF an onyx Ia
BILE New York sun
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
AFRAID MOI ne.
Ne Merely Wanted His Wife To Hold tbs
Light For Him.


At o'clock Tuesday morning, wheE
all the people living on College avenue
We're fast asleep, there was commotion
In one Of the beautiful residences along
that thoroughfare. 1t was The home Of
a merchant, and the con.motion broke
loose in the sleeI ing apartment Of him.
self and wife. She started it.
She awakened suddenly and Thought
she heard some one trying TO break in
down stairs She shook her husband, ono
after some time had elapsed succeeded
In making him realize the situation.
They both listened. There was some
noise, sure enough, and cold shivor
crept down his spinal column and even
70 his toes
He determined not 10 get scared.
though his teeth were chattcrinS, So he
announced that ho would go down and
investigate.
Aren't you afraid, dear" nervously
asked his wife.
He took out his revolver, struck >
match, lighted lamp and then looked
at her in disgust.
AFRAID Well, hardly. never saw
the man yet was afraid Of Now, dont
make any noise, but come on. "
The little woman started in astonish'
ment. Do you want me to go too?"
''Do l want you TO go: Why, Of
course / do. You must go ahead and
carry the light so can see to shoot Do
you think could hit a burglar in the
dark? Hurry up, or he'll be gone. "
And that man made the little woman
60 ahead with the light, while he held
the revolver over her shoulder at full
cock. They traversed the house from
garnet to cellar, finally found a stray
dog scratching at the back door and
came back to bed. He sat up for az
hour telling her what he would have
done had there been burglar there. -
Indianapolis Sentinel.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
WANTED TOO MUCH.
the Latter Part of u Complex Scheme
Fails to Work SUCCESSFULLY.

Said wholesale whisky merchant:
"We have the reputation of giving more
for charity than any other class of men.
While we get credit for some things we
do, yet there are many calls made upon
us that are never recorded. remember
a case not long ago. A former prosper
Gus citizen came into our establishment.
He took ont his handkerchief and wiped
the tears that came into his eyes. In
broken hearted manner he said that his
wife was dying. and that the doctor had
prescribed whisky, but that he did not
have any money. When he told such
tale of woe, ] said;
My friend. if your wife is really
sick, | will give you the whisky.
He swore he was telling the truth.
and l put the whisky in bottle on
which was our brand. He left, the hap
piest looking man in the world. | was
feeling good also and was fattering
myself into thinking l might be another
good Samaritan, when presently my
friend re- ]peared. This time his tears
we're rolling down and his frame was
shaking with cOnvulsive sobs. went
over to him and asked, Is your wife
dead?'
oh, NOT he replied, but I am
afraid she will die, as just as | was at
my front gate slipped on the steps and
dropped the bottle, which broke into q
thousand pieces. picked up the pieces
and have brought them back for you TO
see, and to beg that you will give me
another bottle.
Il was touched and turned to get him
another bottle, when TO my surprise l
got glance at piece Of the glass.
said, Excuse me, my friend, but the
bottle l gave you was white glass and
that one is green. then examined the
pieces and found that il was not the bot.
tie nor our brand. The LIQUID on the
glass was water. AS | looked at my
friend he picked up the pieces turned
red, mumbled an excuse and sneaked
Off. "-Louisville Courier-Journal.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
a. Doctors D,4oomforr In . nigh r,.e~

Some Of tho patients Of one Of the
prominent rhys.cians Al Dorchester ara
getting VII pretty rapidly these days
under the Influence q joke which
they have recent ly Leard regarding their
LIsculapius 1t seems that this doctor
has horrcr Of high places and is al
ways djzzy when on lofty buildings.
Not long ago some relatives from Eng
land visited him and suggested IA trip
10 Bunker Fill, and, in common with
about one half Of the population Of Bos-
ton, the doctor was not only forced 10
acknowledge that he had never been to
the top OF the monument, but was
obliged 10 accompany his guests 20 the
summit of the granite shaft. 1t cannot
be ascertained whether the persons whom
they found there had ever heard Of tho
doctor before, but he had not been there
many minutes when one Of the strangers
was heard to remark that the sun had
such an influence on the monument that
on warm days it warped it. This was
enough for the doctor, and, with part
ing remark that he would sec his friends
at the base, he beat hasty retreat, go-
ing down, il is said, four steps at a
time and not feeling safe until he had
run out on the lawn about the monu-
mcnt far enough 10 get ont Of the way
in case it fell. The joke Of it all is that
the doctor, in a state of absentminded-
ness told the story himself, and now.
much ia has chagrin, his patients are
laughing themselves into good health.
Boston Traveller.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
n nr,ii,ant Confederate.

A prestidigitator, in the course ~ an
exhibition in New York recently, Lad
one of the audience select OF card fro~
pack and then he handei s.le,' of
paper 70 another spectator, TIA. 4 IL 'l-
ing blond man, The professor, who I'D
not see the card, announced that after it
had been returned % the pack the de-
scription Of il would be found written
Oh tie papeY I'll card vas rho eight Of
hearts. lt was ta.;cn &C, by the profess.
or. us thai THE eight of hearts,"
asked the rra 'es>or. "Th-t's all right, +"
answered the ti:lid looking man. But
he was Wy conscientious man, and
later no insisted on telling the audience
that the professor lad written on the
paper. please .ay, 'Th..t'5 AL iGlt. I"
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
A HARD TASKMISTReSS.
The Late Rosina vokes Took Her Ar
Rather Too Seriously.


The Late Rosina vokes Took Her Art
Rather Too Seriously.
The late Mrs. Clay, better known a.
Rosina Vokes, was a hard taskmistress.
She took her art both seriously and
rigidly and demanded the same from
others. A young American girl during
q one time connection with the Vokes
company extraordinarily from feloD
on her finger. 1 ry movement of the
arm gave her pan, and she was at
length obliged to evade her required
participation in "A Game of Cards, -
where the players clap hands, the one
against the other. You shirked your
part last night, Miss Blank, Mrs Clay
took occasion TO observe the following
niorning
II did,, acknowledged Miss Blank,
''for my finger is in such a condition,
ps you see, that prescn, Use Of it is i'm.
possible.
lyon will not shirk your part to.
hight, however, remarked Mrs. Clay,
with an ominous CLEAN in her eye. The
young American knew only too well
that further remonstrance would prob
ably result in her dismissal, so nothing
more was said. That night, according
TO orders. she, with infinite pain, clap
ped hands briskly. At the first touch
the blood gushed from her suffering
finger; but, although her partner was
Mrs. Clay, neither reference nor apology
was made By that exacting star either
then or afterward. Still it was splen.
did training" said the young actress il
later years But to impartial, unprofes.
sional outsiders such training" smack
of tyranny New York Advertiser.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
ANIMAL SUPeRSTITlONs.

1t is unlucky for hare so cross your
path 1t was believed at one Time THAI
hares changed their sex every year.
Rats forsake "a ship before wreck or
house before fall, and if they gnaw al
furniture in a room IL presages death
A dogs howl near house presages the
death of sick inmate, and when dogs
wallow In the dust look for foul weather.
There is but one phenix in the world,
which, after many hundred years, burns
itself, and from its ashes another phenix
rises.
According to the legend, the lions whclp
Is born dead and remains dead three days,
when the father breathes on it and 1t 10
eeives life.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Our Future Formulation.

The territorial area of Japan is about
one-twenty fourth that of the United
States, not counting Canada, which is
likely some time to come in, and it sup
ports 40, 600, 600 people. At this rate il
is computed that the North American
continent would sustain population Of
1000, 600, 600 How soon that limit is
to be reached may be RENTED to the
prophets and the statisticians, but 1t
will come some time without doubt, re-.
curing an increasingly wise type OF
statesman and politician on the way if
we are to hold together and carry out
the destinies which seem appointed to
us.=NeW York Tribune
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Private English Ghosts.

The ghost Of knaresdals Hall, near
Haltwhistle, in Northumberland, was a
steady BELIZE not very, very long ago. In
this case brother murdered an inconven-
lent sister by drowning her in a pond.
and the lady revenged herself by walk
ing from the house TO the pond upon ev-
cry occasion that member Of the fam
fly happened TO he about after dark.
But if one were TO enumerate what may
be termed the private ghosts" Of Eng
land and Wales, the walking ladies and
gentlemen who, having been nobodies
during their lives, are determined that
something more than the mere epitaphs
over their graves shall keep their men,
cries green, the limits of this paper
would be very far exceeded. The very
house in which the author Of the paper
is writing IL we'll known by the villa
gers to have a white lady on its upper
most stair landing, a discovery which
very much unhinged some American
visitors, who declared that il iney had
known it nothing would have induced
them TO sleep so soundly in rooms abut-
ting on the said landing during three
months. But who she was history say
eth not. Chambers Journal
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
What We Have Learned.

Our fathers of IS or 100 years ago
built long lines of turnpikes straight
over hills and along valleys. 1t has
since been ascertained that it is often
nearer round hill than over it and af-
fording al opportunity for a compare.
lively level road.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
A Simple Diagnosis.

Professor Schuslich-I don't know
what's the matter with me, doctor.
am perpetually limping today. Is it loco
motor ataxy, l wonder?
Doctor-Why, professor, you are walk
ing with one foot on the curbstone and
the other in the gutter. -Lustige Blatter.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
a hIasCot.

He is the luckiest mall ever knew. :"
'In what way?'
well he was never sick day in his
life and there is every likelihood that he
will live to green old age, and yet he
is so thin and pale that every life insur-
ance agent who comes along skips him
as a dangerous risk. Chicago Post.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
Took Too Much For Granted.

Have you sold that unruly horse that
you hadf"
" \ on bet did 70
How did you manage itY
Told the fellow that my n.other-tn-l Law
could drive him anywhere
"And-and-he' -
Exactly lie had never sten heri"-
Chic, ~ Recnrd
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

On entering a room whore many
guests are assembled go at once and
speak TO your hostess before addressing
friends who are invited guests The first
and last salutation should be to those
who offer you hospitality.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

In the Cyclopean buildings at Baalbec
there are stones so feet long, feet
thick and Is feet wide. Some of them
are sc feet above the foundation.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
uthOr.

Authors may be divided .ughly into
three groups. the good, the bad and
the popular. The first make fame, the
second make cooks, and the third make
money. New York Evening Sun
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

BY act of congress, the enlisted
strength of our army, in time of peace,
is never TO exceed %, 900 men.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

Modern inks date from 79S, at which
time researches of DR.. Lewis and Riban-
court in the chemistry of ink began.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

NEURALGIA cured by DIR. Miles Pain
PILLS. "One cent IA dose" a. all druggists.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

TLGt E0nlc E0ck can De- cured with
DIR. Miles NERVE PLASTER. July Pc.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

Stop suffering: Try Dr. Miles Pam Pills
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
DR.. Niles Pain Pills stop Headache

AL pain banished by Dr. Miles Pain Piile.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

The war departing was established
by act Of cO.-e. -: 80
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

Nobody need have Neuralgia. Get DR. Miles
Pain Pills from druggists. "One cent dose
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

In 1880 the gross product Of the WOOL
en- ills was valued az 1861. 600 600,
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

Pride, that never failing vice of fools
Pope.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21
TIME IABLE
In effect May 18th. 1896.
TRAINS LEAVE AIN.
TOLEDO. SAGINAW & MUS

u n = 'fN'sNENTA' II
Lv Ashley for Detroi
at 1910 p. m.
Close connections art
made at Owosso Junct'r
with all trains of D., g
II. & NJ. R'y.
BEN. FLETCHER, T. y. A
Detroit. Mich.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

Leave Ashley.
$3.50 a. IN. for Muskegon
1850 p. m. for Muskegon
JNo. w. LORD,
Traffic Manager.
Detroit.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

stop suffering. Try Or. Miles Pain Pills
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-08-21

DIR. Miles Nerve PIasters for Rheumatism.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-04-11
State Politics.

Commodore Tom Power is no,
asleep these days. He has pulled
Paul Mccormick and \. J. Selig.
man out of the race for treasurer and
has decided that Hobson of Meageel
is to be the man. Mr.. Power him,
self would not decline to run for gov.
ernor All this is very nice. o.
course Mr.. Hobson's candidacy is in
tended to shut out DIR. Rotwitt: Pau
Mccormick out, leaves Yellowstone
county in good shape for Babcock
and Rotwitt being checked off b,
the Hobson boom is intended to leave
the coast clear for Niedenhofen. AL
efforts will be directed to keep Silvel
Bow clear for him. Richards, SWEET
Monteath, Kessler, Winters, Booth
Wines, all of these competent ant
more worthy possibilities are to BIZ
beaten down for Niedenhofen.-Ana
conda Standard.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-04-11
An Unlucky Bungle.

On the 21st of December, 1885, Ad-
miral Dundas gave up the command
of the feet and returned to England.
He was succeeded by Admiral
Lyons, between whom and Dundas a
signal parting took place which will
long be remembered as a standing
joke in the navy.
AS Admiral Dundas left the fleet
at Kamiesch the crews of both Eng
lish and French ships manned the
yards and gave him a parting
cheer. At the same moment, by the
desire of Dundas, a signal was run
up to Sir E. Loyns on board the
Agamemnon, May success attend
you, to which Sir E. Lyons ordered
to be hoisted in reply, MAY happi-
ness await you"
But though in real life hanging
and happiness are generally consid-
cred to have M very close conneo-
ton, yet in the signal code they are
very much alike. Unfortunately, in
the hurry to reply to Admiral Dun
das, the flag for the former instead
of the latter word was hoisted, and
what was worse the stupid blunder
was not discovered and hauled down
till the whole feet had seen and
read il. -Pearson's Weekly.