The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1896-12-22
wAYSIDE GATHERINGS.
Bits Of Humor uud Nuggets of Truth
for the Multitude W

'S'e' va N"oE "hu NuRSetS OF Vrutn
for the Multitude.
If there is anyone who should be
raped In slumber,' it is the man who
snores. S
What language We have T! Al
man sits down" during the daytime,
but "sits up" at night.
-Fcw women believe In putting Off
until tomorrow the worry which can
Just as well be done today.
Johnny, tasked the teacher, "what
must we do before our sins will be for
given :? Sin, replied Johnny.
After woman is 3A she ceases Tn
prevarlcate about her age, and bepins
u tell how young her children are.
10 have the advantage of an epemv.
ana yet abstain from using it, is TO
display true Christian magnanimity.
Observation-Disclosures ia
the name applied to an antiseptic Late
~ discovered in Germany. 1t speaks
for itself
Pop, what Is promptness ="
"Promptness? Well, it is a habit of
always being on time aud getting tired
to death, waiting for people who are
- II thought was going to be-
como gray, know should die |" ex-
claimed Miss Sprinkle. And when
she turned gray, she did dyo, sure
-" I've had so much brain work to
40" said Mr.. Funsmith, that haven't
oecn able to sleep for three nights
night"
When the recording angel writes
up the book OF life, he doesn't consult
she ch1rch register SO frequently as
ne does the merchants list of dead
BEATS
Visitor Do your cows give a great
deal of milk? FarmereDo t5avS
Syy It's a fact, stranger, we oct an
much milk that we dilute the well
waite: with it.
Tho authorities of the John Honkins
HOSPITAL, of Baltimore, have bniit %
coidstorage room in which dead bodies
VIII oe Kept for the use Of medical col
legs in winter.
Cluster county is one Of tho oreat-
estin Its stock growing interest In all
Moitana; 1t has 80 cattle, q horses
anc 3o sheep for every man, woman
ant child in it. n
AS result OF an election bet in
Kansas on Bryan, Farmer Doolittle
GU eultor of the Wichita Beacon, will
oecompe led to count bushel of bird.
shit, one by one.
Uncle Sam is slow about paving
rs debts. Last week, DR.. Samuel
Bll, OF Beloit, Wis, got q check for
% que pm for debt occurring in army
srvice 81 years ago.
The street cars OF Buffalo have
cmmenced running by electric power
FINISHED by Niagara Falls, 27 miles
away. The transmission was very
accesstully accomplished
49,, M What are you crying for, little
arl;" Because my brother keeps
nnchlng me-" And why do you pinch
our sister all the time, little how ~
because she keeps crying"
A big Yankee from Maine. on nav.
ng his bill in a London restaurant. was
old that the sum put down didn't in
cqde the waiter. wal" he roared,
l didn't eat any waiter, did ?"
-Thirty-fve sovereigns have as
William the Conqucrer, every month
3cept May witnessing the coronation
one or more that month not one.
The ancient copper mines of Sinai
ave JUST been re-Opened. These were
'orked by the Egyptians or their
iaVeS, 'Voo years ago, and are be-
evcd to have been abandoned about
600 years ago.
a young lady of Springfield, at q
oman suffrage meeting, remarked
Mr. roster said there wasn't a woman
the hall who hadn't as much right
De called man than he had and
hink 30, too :"
A party of 80 persons can sit down
omfortably in the dining room of the
zar's yacht. There is also library
music room and billiard room, and
II Ihe kitchen arrangements are most
laboratc and complete.
Everybody is familiar with the
luslc OF the katydid. 1t is the mala
nat has the voice. At the base of
ach wing cover is thin membraneous
latc. de elevates the wing covers
nd rubs the plates together.
With the assistance OF the latest
lachlnes piece OF leather can be-
'ahslormed into pair Of boots in "a
IN which time il passes
1rough the hands of 63 people and Is
lachines.
Among the things OF curious inter-
'rest at the University OF Chicago is
vase containing the remains OF egg
lellS. These shclls once contained
ar -ooiicd eggs, which were presery-
1 oy haVlng bltumen poured over
lem and were placed in Egyptian
'mbs for the sustenance OF the dead
nrlng their journey to the other wo i'd.
ne n shells are several tn 'usands years