The Hocking sentinel. [volume] (Logan, Ohio) 1871-1906, 1896-05-21
THE BIKE EDITOR
OF THE JOURNAL-G ALETTE.
THE FARMFR AND HIS
TEAM IN THE WAY.
Calls Him a Hog and Other Sweet
Williams.

+ ment for the special advocacy of The
t Bicycle. The editor of this depart
: ment is Of such distinguished ability
j, that he and his department claim:
e passing attention.
e In tie last issue, under caption
. "The Bike About Town we find the
following. The allusion to the conn
r try man, coming to town i'll the farm
: wagon, will be appreciated by all the
loafers in the country
"Keep the middle of the road" is
, the motto of the swine that sits up in
the seat with the lines between his
front toes and expects to force you out
into tie rough places and cutters
while he holds seierenely to his
course. Simply dismount and stand
in your place by your wheel, and look
. the swine in the eye. If lie then in
sists upon crowding you out, do a
little insisting yourself. The heav-
ier your weight, the better developed
your muscle, and the more manifest
your disposition to employ those en-
dowments patriotically. the quicker
the swine with the lines between his
front toes will pull to one side and
leave you in possession of your law
full half of the highway.
SpIend advice echoes the Bike.
Even in Hooking county we have
these animals, but we may reform
them in time BIKE.
So the Journal -Gazettee Biker and
the other dudes of the town who 90
out on frolic along the boulevard
towards Webb's Summit, improved,
we are told without any expense to
the taxpayer,propeses that the farmer,
ga swine with the lines between his
toes" shall give half the road, or
stand the whitening look of the Bike r.
Shades Of the old time ore haulers,
protect us!
Such editorial genius and such
road courage should be identified, and
crowned with the proper credit. The
Bike editor is not Comrade Tom AL
len, We are sure. The gray and bull
let pitted old veteran when he led
the charge on the battery, and when
he rushed up the sleeps of Lookout
Mountain, close on the heels of Phil
Sh eridan, was not riding on a wheel.
He was on foot. In war he so ad-
vanced, and when in the country on
newspaper work-we have it on his
own say so-he is son the wing" No,
Tom a lien is not Bike. 1t can't be
Brother Mckay. 1t has been but
such short time since he learned TO
walk, that he can not safely give it
up for fear of falling baek to the in
fantile proceeding on all tours. He
may have ambitions that way, may
want a hobby horse on wheels, but
no Bike for him yet awhile, not till
he feels the courage of red top boots
and displays the ability to walk alone.
1t then must be the old wool edi-
tor, the horn blower of the Good
Hope Hills, the mellifuent shepherd
of the Millville meadows, our own
every day Herpsichord Hulse.
He is Biker, and bikes Oil the
streets every day. He is a teacher
of a class. He gives lessons in pos
ture. lie has adopted as his model,
the rainbow curve. that being best
adapted to show the elasticity and
elongation of his back bone. When
he bikes along the boulevard to Com
missioner Webbs, the farm teams
take to the siding, and the old farmer
who treasures in his mind the legend
of the pot OF gold to be found at the
foot of the rainbow, gazing on this
curve on wheels, sees at
the eyther and neyther ends, half
side of sole leather and a squash, but
valuable products, in their place, the
one covering the immense feet of the
Biker, the other a substitute for the
head of bike editor.
Among the bikists of our town, the
bike editor may be distinguished by
the curved spine, but for further iden-
titication his countenance is adver-
tisement. His face wears a panied
and perpleXed look, a cast of countc-
nance which follows temporarily up
on reading one of his funny articles,
and has a fixed imprint upon the
author.
His last article, the "Road Hog, .
the Swine with lines between his
toes' published above, has given
sleeper gradient to his yertebra, and
l more corrugated rim to the eye
which is supposed to be set on the
man who will not drive off the road
and give him and his wheel full wob-
Die way.
1t is also our notion, in the interest
Of the newspaper having a reliable
news item, that when Bike, and cy- :
,lers of his cult, parade on the big
'oad on their hundred dollar wheels
lot listed for taxation, and refuse to
,ive the way to a teamster whose
lorses and wagon would not sell for