The people's journal. (Pickens, S.C.) 1891-1903, 1896-05-07
BILL AIsP's PHILOSOPHY.
He Has Controversy With Mrs. Arp
and Meets With His Usual Defeat.

Tho peafOwls stirred up small
garter snake down in the grove and
they raised such q rumpus as to attract
my wife's attention. The reptile came
slipping along through the grass to.
ward the house and she screamed for
me, of course. 1t camo in the front
yard and L killed it by the stone step,
but my wife mover believes snake IL
dead as long as its tail wiggles. had
to keep on killing it to satisfy her, and
thcn hang it up in q tree to make it
rain. 1t is awful dry up here, but now
reckon it will just pour down some
tilne. This is the second snake that
has ever been seen hcrc, but me wife
says sho knows that the place is just
haunted with them. They always go
in pairs, sho says. Moses mentions
any until after Eve was created.
Probably Adam lived and worked in
that garden alone for many years and
he got rs sick Of it us did Robinson
Crusoe. Then Eve was created for
Adams express company, and they got
along worry well until the serpont bo-
guiled her. "Yes, and tho poor wo-
man has TO bear all the blame Of ou,
sin and misery" said my wife. "Ad-
dam said The woman Thou gavcst
mo did give unto me and | did cat.
Why didert Eve say the man Thou
didst make me for did not protect me
from the wiles OF that smooth-tonguod
serpent. He let mo eat first and take
| all tho risk Of tho danger. Tho old
autocrat. No tclling how long he had
boon acquainted with tho serpent for
he knew all the animals and had
mingled with them and had dominion
over them and had given them all
namos long before Evc was created. y
" No doubt Of It., said |, for Josephus
says that the serpent lived in the house
with Adam and was very handsome and
very smart and could talk. Perhaps
they played marbles together and
went in awnshing."
! Yes" said Mrs. Arp, and the
Lord gave the command To Adam about
the forbidden fruit long before Eve
was born"
| "Sho wascnt BORN" said |.
Pity sho was not, said she. 'Thcn
she would have had a mother who
would have protected her from tho
serpent and from Adam, too. The
poor women never even had choice of
lovers nor u courtship nor u wcdding."
Nor trOusscau nor her picture In
tho papers" said I, land she dressed
remarkably thin considering that the
climate thcro is about like ours. [
reckon that Adams family expenses
wcro worry light about those times.
But later ON he caught it, for J0scphus
says ho had twcnty-throo daughters,
and, OF course, somebody put up u dry
sold linery. Fig leaves played out
early
" l should like to know whore they
got any dry goods and Gncry or any
money to pay for it," said she. "The
Biblo says tho Lord mado them gar
mcnts of skins"
Yes" said I, "madc thcm for
Adam and Eve, but two or thrco hun
drcd years after that thoy mado orna-
mcnts of gold and had precious stones
ana made money, too, for Moses Says
in the second chapter Of Genesis that
one OF tho four rivors flowed through "A
land where the gold was good and
thcro, too, was bdullium and tho onyx
stone. OH, they caught ON to now fash
ions mighty fast, and cut up scandalous
and Joscphus says tho sons OF Coo
wcro fallen angels and they saw tha
tho daughters OF mon were fair to loot
upon and thcy mated with them ant
raised aocrop OF giants, aud cvorybod,
got dcmoraliIcd except Noah and hi
family.
Moses tells how that wisc-hcarto,
women spun with their hands and mad
beautiful ornaments for the tabernacle
S0mo Of tho necklaces taken from tn
mummics are rs fine as arc ever sccl
at Tilany's. Tho ancionts worc no
behind us in fine fabrics and Ornamon
tai arts. We read OF an ancient IlindO(
princess who CAmo into court On .
state occasion and her father said sc
back, my daughtcr--go back and drcs.
YOURSELF And she replied, Father
I havo on scvcn SUITS but they wcro O.
muslin, so dolicatcly fine tho king coull
see through them"
We'll, that will do now" said my
wife, "Thc baby is waking up. Bring
her to mo, please. The poor little
thing can't slcop long whilo sho is
cutting that othor tooth. She is tho
best and sweetest child III tho world
| wish she would cry and be cross a
littlo sometimes. Somehow am afraid
shcl Is too precious to stay horo long.
Ium hero to your dan-ma, darling
And little Caroline puts ont her arms
and smiles and COOS, and her dan-ma
feels her forehead and says Pm afraid
sho has a little fever and has takon a
cold. When you walk out with her
you will not put on her bonnet. When
child is teething you can't DO too
careful with them.
The othor day my wife was looking
all around tho room for her spectaclcs.
When suddenly she discovered that
shc had thcm on and she exclaimed,
Well, | do reckon Pm the biggest
fool In tho world !" " No you amt
grandma" said another grandchild.
" You arc the besscst fool in tho
world" Her spectaclcs havo got too
young for her, and must get another
pair. What q pity it is that these old
grandmOthers have to wear out and
pass away Mother Eve didn't. Good
gracious what q time she had with
her postority, ,Josephus says sho had
sixty children, and if they had sixty
apiece and SO on down tho line and she
lived as long as Adam did, there wore
eight generations in sight, and that
would make millions Of people. 1t
would make a hundred millions II each
generation had only ten apiece.
But | must stop ruminating about
those speculations, for hoar Mrs. Arp
calling again on tho piazza. els it
the other snake ?" said l. "No; but
the baby Is fretting and wants you to
q IL q Hnr Il H.. . H.