The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1896-01-05
TALE OF A WARN Bot
A LOCAL INCIDENT FROM A RECENT
SWELL SOCIAL FUNCTION.
Night Was Very Cold and One Young
Man Had n Bottle in His
Overcoat.

<oSCA eaAih6S dAC hui always seen at DIG
social functions Sometimes they happen
1t was mat way the other night at a swell
dance In one OF the popular assemblage
places up town." where the buds and full
blown roses mixed in a goodly company
On the outside the winds were playing
freeze-out with the old year-and winning,
too-while on the inside of the building the
gentlefolks were bidding in the new year
with as merry cheer as the soulless gas
corporation would permlt-for the natural
gas meter that night was slower than the
meter of Gregorian chant.
'Br-r-r-r," remarked one young man,
with teeth chattering. ITS cold enough in
here to hatch polar bears"
Say" added another youth, who was
making his first visit to Indianapolis, does
Proppytilorum mean Refrigerator
NO." put in another. Its the French
for sunstroke, Of course. Suppose we go
down and bore out that gas mixer"
And SO on, and so on went the cruel re-
marks from the jeunesse doree, while the
young women in their decollete gowns, like
all Indianapolis women, being we'll trained
in politeness, made no breach OF good form
by discussing so hackneyed a topic as the
weather.
The fddles squeaked on, the harp thrum-
med and the leader with his foot beat time
for the Tommy Atkins two-step-just as he
had done nine thousand three hundred and
forty-four times before for Indianapolis
dances-the same old Tommy Atkins who
was "a credit to his nation" and will con-
tinue to be as long as Indianapolis dances
the two-step. Everybody danced in order to
keep up the circulation of the blood, and the
man who had no partner hoped from one
foot to the other out on the stair landing,
lest the cold render his limbs numb. Pres
emily the music stopped, the violin player
put his instrument in it's case and all hands
at the music took a recess.
Fellows" one young man was heard to
remark to others. lets go down in the
dressing room and see il we can't send out
for warm bot A warm bot is a choice
bit of Kentucky patois, and doesn't mean
champagne. beer nor anything like that.
Perhaps the janitor can get it at the
drug store. Have him get Old Pepper or
Monongahela, that's the BEST" volunteered
another OF the group. In little while
phalanx of Immaculate shirt fronts came
down the broad stairs and into the mems
dressing room. The janitor wasn't in sight.
1t was still cold. Quite cold, indeed.
rs there any possibility that some man
had the foresight to bring little Sunlight
fluid with him?' asked one youth. Sum
light fluid means just the same as warm
bot"
Not one chance in five hundred" was a
reply. L know man that used to bring
bottled milk to these gatherings, but his
cow is oat at the farm this winter. They
say he had indigestion or something like
why didn't they give the cow pepsin
chewing gum; that's good for Indigestion"
Here, Mr.. Smart Man, 1 was talking
about the man, not the cow
"Gentlemen," interrupted the leader of
the crowd, I'VE are not a lot of farmers
Stop this dairy talk. The question is, how
are We to get something to keep us warm?
friends overcoats, in the faint hope that
perhaps some old Santa Claus brought a
bottle with him tonight"
So a systematic, pre-eminently re-
spectacle search-Since Ii was in the inter-
est of freezing humanity-began. Overcoat
upon overcoat was subjected to this genteei
and prize upon prize was set
adrift because it did not contain the longed-
for object.
Eureka" shouted Mr.. Sophomore. ''here
it isl
those little hunchbacked affairs, with a
stubby neck and metal top that screws
on tight. The top Of the flask came off in
into friendly relations with the mouth of
SHss aust be deep c saaaSn frs
rum, Was Ule opinion Oh an
other. ''Or Tennessee brandy mixed with
came the third expert opinion.
The bottle went the rounds for more ex-
pert opinions. well, here goes" said the
liquor it is. but its got the right sort of
boquet and taste" and the bottle was tilted
sufficient ang1e That's fbs mot bad and
II have tasted worse" ventured Mr..
Sophomore.
BY the time the flask passed down the
portion of the warmth a scant quantity
Of the liquor remained. There was just
enough left. so the gentlemen thought, for
the owner of the bottle who. quite by ac-
What have you fellows found?" he in
luired.
well" replied the leader. 'You came
lust in time old man. 1t was cruel in
you to bring liquor to ball on cold
like s AND hs9 PUT ad It und But
forgive you on account of the good quality
Of the stuff.
handed Mr.. Owner.
Nothing else" he was informed.
Great Caesar" he exclaimed, Gentle |
men. that bottle cost me So
I'VE thought 1t was pretty fine stuff"
,himed in three men who had first as |
sured the crowd that the liquor was all |
light. The vindication Of their judgment |
What did you think 1t WASP" asked the |
puzzled owner.
whisky" from as many as five threats |
whisky" and the owner was astounded. |
why, men, half spoonful of that stuff |
s a big dose"
What was it?" and alarm was spread |
in several faces.
Gentlemen, that's my Kelley cigarette |
ure."
And so, 1t was afterwards said, con- |
siderable portion of the fine spread ordered |
rom Cincinnati or ST. Louis was never |
ouched. There were enough people there, |
o be sure. but it wasn't every one that had |
n appetite that night.