Lincoln County leader. [volume] (Toledo, Lincoln County, Or.) 1893-1987, 1896-11-19
.;@llENY.


If her hair gets out of friz
Judge.
Howso-l can do my best work ri.
it is hot. Cumso-What a great t"a'
you have before you!-Life,
Judge-What is the chorco
this prisoner? Policeman-He sfaL
wheel, your honor. Judge-Wbat m,s
Philadelphia North American D''
Sawyer, I've cured my wife,s iD,,,
MIA" How did you do it?o apaI
maid get up and ring the rIsing har i
the middle of the night."-Cbjcag0 D.
ord.
She-Do you suppose his wife ,0,ri
supports him? He-I Judge 50. Hp ii
me he didn't know what real honnins
meant until after he got morriI
Puck.
Louise-The bishop looked rf.
cross, didn't he? Isabel-Weu M w.,
der; every one of the bridesmaids M
on bigger sleeves than he had ri
Bits. I
Hello, gloves" said Jack to TOnna
and Sammle. "Whatcher call us ,Iov.
for?" asked Tommie. "Becausa sd
are a pair Of kids" said Jack.-Hanp,l
Bazaar.
Winks-Do you believe in hypnOtsuI
Binks-Of course | do. Don't Won "A
this necktie that the clerk induced nj
wife to buy the other day?-SOmeryl]
Journal.
II tell you, these little vacation trj
do a fellow an immense amount \
good" 80 they do; | feel braced b
enough to bluff every creditor | hsve]
Chicago Record.
81 tell you" cried the author, T1
going to rise in this world" The sI
tor eyed him doubtfully for five second
and then asked: Balloon or elevator
Atlanta Constitution.
Miss Daisy Medders (coyly)-DO NI
love me, Jason? Jason HuckleberT1
Course l love you! Do you s'pOS Tl
have been actin the fool over you Il
this time if l didn't?-Truth.
Doesn't it strike you that the tenn
perature of this room is rather hlghF
There isn't any doubt about it, Re
piled the frugal young man. Ever
ton of coal costs $6.'-WashingtOn SG
There's the bicycle face, and the bi!dl
back,
With its queer, %altitudinOus curve;
And the bicycle tongue, in the miiii
hung,
And the scorcher's bicycle nerve.
indianapolis Journal.
Bacon-Did you know there wei
over 735,O13, $50, 800 different Whs
hands in a pack of cards? Egbert-Ye
my wife tells me about each one neafl
every time we play.-Yonkers State
man.
"Bilker, you ought to be ASHAMED
wear such good clothes when you oV
me so much money" mo: you ought
be proud to lend money to a man TA
wears such good clothes."|Ch
Record.
"Country's gone to the dogs; no bop
for til" TOO bad! Just had an ee
ton, haven't you?" Eyes" "WsI
wasn't it a fair one?" "Oh, yes! DIV
l was beat, sir-plum beat."-A'aD'
Constitution.
you don't make allowances fol- o.
boy" said the fond mother. "ra
shows how little we are apprecla'u
said her husband. as he finished da'
ing a check. II don't do much else
Washington Star.
Sageman-That walters hand alW''
reminds ME of a race horse Shorty :
ter the beginning of a race. SeeAe
And for what reason, pray! saseI'
Because it's on the quarter strecA
Boston Courier.
She-Dear me. Why don't they YEA
choruses to sing intelligibly? Ns'
aggravating to be unable to dlsllnSu'
the words. He-You don't know "
luck. l have read the libretto.- lDuN
apolls Journal.
Eyes" said the tenderfoot, as ne v
ed rapidly through the air; Anu"
am an ungraceful rider. But auu
commenced disengaging himseli ~
the cacti, II don't need any po'n''
alighting Puck.
Summer Guest-The mosquitoes w
terribly bad last night. LOOK a.
face. Jersey Landlord (reassur'nsg;
Oh. there's no mosquitoes here 7"
none worth mentioning. ThemS w
New York Weekly.
Plugwinch II understand i