The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1896-11-11
A BICYCLE SUICIDE.
suPsAck TAYLOR RESOLVED THAT
He WOULD RIDE OR DIE.


members Of the Thompson Street Bicycle
club who waited for the regular weekly
meeting 20 open that President Ioots had
something on his mind OF coDsidera bic i'm
portance- He looked anxious and worried
and the routine proceedings we're hurried
over in manner to show that his inter
est was bevond There were various sur
misses Of coming disaster, but no one sus-
pected the truth until it fell from his lips
My frens said the president as he
arose in his place, 90 de painful dooty de-
wolves upon me as president Of dis club TO
break de news TO 20 dat Brudder Slipback
Taylor ara 10 mo on de face OF dis airth
He was, as 70 all know, one Of de charter
mem bers Of dis club, an a man who took
de greatest interest in all our proceedings
At noon today I met him on de street. an
ne was suckin lemon an carryin home a
porous plaster fur his back His eyes had
q furaway look. an I noticed dat he had
q limp. buE he reared TO be in good health
a speerits- Two hours ago he was found
hanEin to a tree in his back ya'd at de
eand OF a clothesline- His wife fusb thought
he was playin game On her TO find out
how much she luved him But, alas the
drefful truth was soon apparent Brudder
Taylor was as dead as a doahnau an as
cold as piece of sheet iron in Jinuary.
Was domestic onhappiuess de reason
fur dis tragedy continued the president
as nc W. pea away q 41--A w L4ALssd
went all right at home. He was not hard
up he was not sick He had no secret
sorrow. It was a plain. straight case Of
cause an effect. De bike was de cause an
de effect vas dat he was found dead.
Bruddsr Taylor was a man so years
ole Fur dc last ten y ars he has had
rheumatic, biless chilblalns, lame back.
heart disease. asthma an seberal other
ailments An if dar had been q hundred
fat an juicy watermilly0us jest Ober de
fence he could not heV clumb ober to git
one. was mo dan surprised when be
iined dis club. 1t didn' c seem TO me dat
he could eter be able TO ride de wheel, but
he would listen to no argument He jest
made up his mind dat dc wheel was good
fur what allied him, an dat five mile spin
befo breakfast would soon make a young
man OF him, JIG was no use to hurt his
faelin's ober de matter. Muffin has cher
happened to gin me mo pain dan TO watch
de efforts Of DAT pore ole man TO cOnker de
wheel. He was up befO' daylight an out
after dark- Sometimes he would come
home hmpin on boOf legs sometimes dey
would bring him on a cray. He fell on
his head, on his ear, On his back. on his
side He goe a bruisa at ebery rod. an he
left a piece of hide on cherry block. He run
into fences. street kyars, ice wa CONS, hacks
and pedestrians. an vehicles OF varus sorts
an kinds run oDer him. Policemen threat
ened, women wept an men guyed him,
but be kept right on He was gwine TO
ride that bike or die
dis afternoon Brudder Taylor went
out as usual TO hev his usual struggle Wild
de wheel He had cooked de saddle up,
soaked de chain an blowed up de tires, an
de feelin mad come to him dat success was
within his reach Nobody happened TO
see what followed 1t am s7posed, how
eber, dat in de eEhilerashun of his speerits
he attempted fyin mount Eefo' dat he
had always got-up tree 60 drop into de
saddle De attempt was a failure When
he riz on his toe, his bike started OF So
fur as I kin trace it by scraps of elothin
an loose buttons, it canUsred Ober a boss
block, lodged three times around a shade
tree AID den galoped across de street an
upset a laundry wagon an brung up agin
a brick wall Brudder Taylor was found
on de ground wild his legs tied IN a hard
knot an his head driven down so far TO 'rds
his heels dat they couldn' find his neck to
put a piece of ice on it. When dey got him
onranglad, he was advised TO 60 home an
stick TO rockiB cheer de balance Of his
days, an he Hmped away Widout word.
He went straight home, passed into de
back ia a, and de next seen Of him he was
cold in death He had evidently cum to
de conclushun dat de bike was not fur him
He had planned an anticipated, an de re-
action had bin too much fur him Feelin
waste. an hevin made up his mind at last
dat he was a beaten man, he put de moose
ooer his head q let his speerit sail away
TO dat land whar' a pa T OF wings kin gin
de bike ten rods de start an beat it home
cherry day in de week. Each member of
de club VIII wear de usual badge Of mourn
in fur de next 80 days, an de sum Of $50
viii be sent to the grievin wilder TO help
pay funeral expenses.
An I hev another startlin piece Of
news fur de members Of dis club . contin-
ued the president after a pause Last
night Brudder SHUTDOWN Smith an de wife
Of Brudder state Rights Thompson won't
out for g spin in de gloamin- DER lamps
was lighted, DER chains dooly creased, an
dey carried along de usual ~ wrenches,
oil cans an cdder implements Of repair De
gloamin cleaned, an as dey rode away de
Grehies few about an de whippoorwiI
sang his song Of love Brudcer Thompson
put de chillen to bed an den sot up an
waited wild his feet in tub OF water
De clock struck leben an II an ! an
., but his wife returned not. De hours
crepr slowly on, an when daylight cum
an she was still uissin be knocked at
my doah We consulted de police an visit
ed dc morgue, an it was three hours befo'
we learned de truth Brudder Smith and
Sister Thompson had sloped, an befo day
light were so miles away an Still ped
alin- DIS am de fusU case of slopement
on de bicycle. white or black. TO be record
ed in de history Of de world, an while our
sy mpathies may 60 out fur de stricken
husband we can't help but feel a leetls
proud uber de circumstance Brucder
Smith mad only 60 cents IN his pocket
when deF started. an we may recken on
seeln boaf Of iem widin week or So
Dey will, Of eofse, be expelled from de
club, but II Bru6der Thompson kin ober-
look the matter an take his wife back we
shan't hev 8 word 70 say. II was predict
ed long ago dat de day would cum when
de bike would be used fur jis5 sich pur-
poses, an while &c majority OF Us smiled
at de ideah we hev now got our eyes open
cd am kin take proper precaushuns- De
rest Of y0f kiu do as 20 please. but as fur
ma T .s~---- ~,-= --Har1