The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1896-10-24

Wen have no comic vn,entines;
lis cheering, you'lI allow.
10 see the skill spent IN those lines
All turned to posten now.
Washington Star.
shs-Am the first girl you ever kiss
ed? He (surprised) why. mol I have
three sisters someryIlle Journal.
She-What's your business? He
Looking for a wife. you've got a
steady job, haven't your-Life.
Blnks-Your nephew is quite prom
sing young man. Isn't he? JInks-Well
be has never done anything else as vet.
--Someryille journal.
That was a bad runaway YOU had
the other night, Mrs. Dash Eyes. but
it was very stylish; we had four
hoses. Chicago Record.
Mrs. Brown-Mrs Smith is n woman
Of remarkable strength Of mind. Mrs.
Jones-Is she? Yes. She never buys
anything she doesn't want."-LIfe.
Time works strange distraction
In the object OF her zeal:
She's forgot to want the ballot
Since she learned to ride the wheel
Washington Star.
Johnny-Pa, what Is the difference
between a tonsorial artist and bar
berg Mr. Wiggles-The tonsorlal art
lst uses longer words. -Someryille Jour
nal
He lives in brick house now, does
Eeg" sneered the rural cynic. Il used
TO wipe the clay or my boots that the
bricks in tina. house are made off,
Truth.
Her Dearest Friend: Cholly-How
old do you suppose Miss Kurdish is?
Gertrude might ask mamma. Per-
haps she'll remember Cleveland Lead
er.
The man who thinks that women have
No lively gift Of wit,
Has never asked girl to wed,
And heard her answer nit"
Indianapolis Journal
Mrs. Gazzam-Why is the ringing Of
a bell made obligatory upon bicycle
riders? Mr.. Gazzam-It gives their
victims time to make an ejaculatory
prayer.-Truth.
Waiter lat club restaurant)-Ready
with your order, sahs City Sportsman
hack from weeks ishing)-Give me
some fish; I'm tired to death of other
} things.-New York Weekly.
LaIra-Is 1t fact that your engage
ment with Willie is broken OF? Flora
Why. no; not broken Off. exactly. II
sort Of tapered of. one might say.-In-
dianapolis Journal.
Johnny-Papa, what is meant by "a
person Of sangune temperament
Papa-It means-a-it means a person
who expects a good many things tha
do not happen.-Puck.
Dah's lots O. folks puts in dab time
Il hahdly kin endure 'em)
A-talkin' bout dab troubles Std
O. hustlin' roun' ter cure en-.
Washington Star.
Balllnger-It will be a swelterni
summer at the shore. How viii yo'
manage to keep cool? Manhattan
shall limit my enga gements to Bostol
girls exclusively.-To Topics.
Osgood-I guess Matthews intends t
run for office this year.-Wawmam-
: What makes you think sog Osgood-
He's removed the fence from aroun'
. his beautiful awn.-Cleyeland Leader
= Hungry. Higgins What do you thin
' of this here eight-hour movement, any
z wayl Weary Watkins-Ef 1t mean
1 not movin' moren once every eigh
y hours guess it's all right.-Indianapc
o lis Journal.
Mrs. Buzbey-What's all this talk 10
papers are full of about 10 to IL MI
Buzbuz- Oh. Ats the score Of some grea
baseball game, | suppose. You kno'
n how crazy men are on that subject
J. Roxbury Gazette.
le How strangely do life's prizes go,
e Awarded by the crowd
E. Some triumph by the things they know,
e And some by talking loud.
le Washington Evening Star.
D. ME. Motherby-How are you gettiu
$ on with your singing lessons, KATE
" Miss Screecher-Well, think l must
l. improving. notice, anyway, thu
re when practice now the neighbo
d don't come and ring the doorbell to pr
IT test-Somerville Journal
No She ION the way over)--Just to THU
N that this big ship Is absolutely una
'e the control OF the man at the whe'
He-Oh. that's nothing. The man
D. The wheel at home claims to have pol
D. err enough TO control the whole natio
a Philadelphia North American
e When for lengthy hiking tour
d Vscationists prepare.
K The first inquiry ought 70 he
n As to the railroad fare.
n -Washington Star.
II Flowery F:elbs-Is deere any demai
l. fer farm labokrs between here a
: SQuedunk7 Farmer Jones-Naw'
5 reckon TIL farmers hey hired all 10 he
= they need by this time. Flowery fie'
II Shaking his partner)
Il Weary. We've struck de right road
; last.]udge. tfri
o Mother-"Mary, that young Spinne