The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1896-04-12
MAJOR MAYS coxrnAD1cr1ox.
Ho Seems TO Have - Proper Love or the
Flag, but Tries TO Prove Otherwise.

at was In the Nez,perche campaign. and"
And" interrupted Mrs. Max, with a slight
approach to animation. " you are going to tell
something about that Bob Billings. You always
do when you talk abotis that campaign"
"That must be-" tho Major remarked. after a
thoughtful pause. because Bob was so large a
part Of that little affair. In this instance. how
ever. 1 intended to useIBob merely rs an illuml-
native instrument"
Gracious, Major! that sounds like the X
rays or something" Mrs. Max said with Il
frown. denoting an approach OF weariness. for
the lady has small taste for any science not in
timately related to polite social problems.
My subject" the Major replied. has no
more to do with Y rays ttnn has this empty
glass with the hurried propagation of a pump
kin. Being empty. it might he inverted over a
planted pumpkin seed IN the sun, where, by the
well. known process of concentrating heat-"
Major. II l I'LL the glass will you stop talking
like thnt3"
I'll stop talking altogether IL You I'll It often
enough"
There. then. your glass 10 filed. What about
Bob?"
My dear" tho Major said, bob can wait
while We observe this wine: this seventy-four
my friend Ross sent me from London
II remember Mr.. Ross" Mrs. Max exclaimed,
HE looks like Mephistopheles and reciteA
poetry like an angel"
Yes, wherein he differs from most people
who r%ccite; they look like al gels and recite.1ike
the
Major"
Exactly. But this seventy four:
dark in color; practically still; rich In flavor
and bouquet. and"
do you know. Major" interrupted his wife
eagerly. Mrs. Jack Daring says she hopes that
We'll have war with Spain because then we'd
have a sanitary fair at Madison Square Gardens,
and have a chance to wear heavenly aprons and
lace caps and sell dollar things for ten dollars
and-Major! what are you smiling aboutr"
Il am smiling in pure Joy at n discovery,
which brings me back to my starting point; a
discovery that IN woman. as in man, the inter-
est in war 10 not promoted byany Inflammation
OF the sanguinary passion. With most of the
men. who really do the fighting. as with women.
who hold fairs to raise funds to buy chicken
broth and bandages for the wounded. the inter-
est in their work IS as free from bloodthirsti-
ness as is that of n person reading one Of Mr..
Howells's stories"
My dear Major. who is Mr.. Howells7"
Merely an innocuous example. But lot me
proceed. AS l began to say. it was in the Nez
Perces campaign when Bob Billings and /, with
a small detail OF men and a howitzer. were
doing our best TO entertain Chief Joseph in a
trip over the Rocky Mountains. Once, whom we
had taken n position in advance OF tho men and
horses, who were dragging our gun up a hill
that was little less than u cliff, Joseph discovered
our predicament and with IA force muchlarger
than ours assaulted us and"
oh. Major, you did not retreat9"
"Well. we-er-we abandoned ouraposItion.
leaving two Of our men dead"
Poor chnps!'
"When Billings went with a flag of truce and
a couple OF soldiers to ask for the bodies, Chief
Joseph returned to Bob our flag. which one of
the fallen soldiers had carried. Joseph ex-
planned, that as we seemed to think a great deal
OF 1t, and he had no use for II, he took pleasure
In returning II to u.s."
And he was a savage Indian ,~aMrs. Max
asked In SURPRISE.
We'll" replied the Major. after finishing his
glass. he was at least an Indian. Bob and l
sent tho old fellow our last pound OF tobacco
and then fought him again. AS ] was saying,
you see that there is very little passion felt by
the men who really fight. l suppose II is neces-
sary to arouse the passions OF the general pub
lie in order TO get the money to.carry on war"
The Major paused. pinched the settlers ears.
walked about the room several times. reflled
his glass, sat down again. observed that Mrs.
Max had the book she was holding iopen turned
upside down. and then said:
~ saw my old friends DnlenbecR OF the First
'tillery and Woods Of the Katahdin at the club
the other day"
Yves, I know You met them%Mrs Max said,
smiling knowingly.
But | didn't mention it,, the Major er-
claimed in surprise.
mo. but You camo home and studied that
book about what do you caltit ?-Driu Rcru-
lations all night; so knew you had met Them"
Now, Is 1t not interesting" responded the
Major graveiy, although he was blushing a
little, is II not interesting to oh ,erye how much
your charming sex learns by intuition | was
going to add two instances to prove that tho
professional warrior of to-day looks upon war
with purely scientific interest. There Is Dilen-
beck, with his trousers bRgGy at the knees from
praying for war with Spain only because his
light battery has some new model guns and n.
wants to try them; and Woods, in the same
condition OF trousers and mind. because he
wants to prove that the Katatdin can ram
through any battle ship anoat. Their interest
is purely, coldly scientific, you sea"
But, Major, what has that to ldo with your
Drill Regulations
"Oh.' responded the Major with affected
carelessness. but something in his voice made
the setter put us nose with a little whimper of
anxiety on Its masters knees. "Oh. was won
dering tiff there were trouble-whetber the
Governor would give ms a regiment OF yolun.
teers to take out"
Mrs. Max rose and walked around 10 the aid.
OF the Majors chair. For a moment she ala
not speak and there was no sound but the
nervous tapping OF the settlers tail on the car
pet. Then Mrs. Max said very softly:
Major, those men talked 10 Won about ANNA
thing besides new guns and rams. What VAS
itY" WIS
why, You see, Woods was down At Havan.
at the time Of the virRlnius AFFAIR, when snan-
iards boarded an American ship, tore up the |
American Officers American papers, and hsulSd
down the American nag" the Major answered. |
the color deepening In his face a. he spoke.
chief did :" Mrs. Max asked.
mo. but by GOD, they SpAt ON the ds0 ~
EDWARD w. ToUKsKNp.