Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1896-05-13

Brooklyn Eagle.
Florence-"What is the first thing
you have to learn In golf?" Marion
what to wear."-Puck.
She-"Did you see the Latin quarter
while In PARISH He-"No; but 1 got
several lead francs passed on me-
Truth.
Ignorance, bliss; knowledge, blister
-She-"When you married me you
said you were we'll off," Hell was;
but did not know it."-Vanity.
None Too Cordial.-The Hostess-"1
suppose there is no use of asking you
to stay to dinnerf The Caller-"Not
In that way."-Cleveland Plain Dealer
Poetry Fed-She (sentimentally)-
"What poetry there is in firew He (sad.
ly)-"Yes; a great deal of my pretty
poetry has gone there. "-Harper's Ba-
Ear.
Just the Same Thing-"Say, loan me
$40 for about week?" Cant; have
MT got but FIVE" ''That'll do-led me
the five for two weeksr-Chicago Rec
ord.
The difference between a somnambu-
list and a messenger boy Is trifing:
One walks in his sleep, and the other
sleeps in his k."-Philadelphia
Press.
AS the hurricane swept the deck and
upset a few yachtsmen 1t breezily re-
marked: 81 guess 1 can turn an oc-
casional summer-'salt' myself."-Rich-
mond Gazette.
Wizway-"What is meant by pass
ing regard?" Juzby-'The regard In
which you're held by people who bow
to you but don't stop to speak. '-Rox-
bury Gazette.
She-"We've been married four
months, dear, and haven't given you
a chance to try my cooking yet" He
"Why, love, you're not getting tired Of
me already, are youY'-Yonkers States
man.
Really Unjust.-"I have done moth
ing but blush all day." complained the
rose, land still that idiot of poet goes
on talking of the modest violet, as If
there were not others. "-Cincinnati En-
quirer.
Mulman-'I often hear people speak
about brain work being SO awfully
hard; 1t doesn't appear to me So" Gut
ter-"Of course not; to men OF your
caliber brayin' work Is easy."-Boston
Courier.
Mama-"Russell, stop teasing your
brother; I'm tired Of hearing him cry"
Russell-''It won't make any difference
II l do stop, COS IL don't tease him
he'll tease me and make me cry."-Har-
per's Bazaar.
How large were the diamonds|
asked the press agent, pausing In the
writing Of the account for publication.
about as large as chestnuts," con-
fessed the actress nwittingly.-Min-
neapolis Times.
Game warden-Look here. Don't
you know that you cant shoot deer
just now? Proud amateur sportsman
Cant pointing to fine dead buck)
Look at that and see whether l can't
Boston Courier.
Winterbloom-Dont you think $500
Is rather high for a tailormade gown?
Won Blumer tells me his wife paid
only $3.50. Mrs. Winterbloom-True,
my dear, but she got hers before
got mine.-Harlem Life.
Teacher-Can any little boy tell me
which Is the longest day in the year?
Billy-Some fellows say the day be-
fore Christmas Is, and some say the
per's Round Table.
II don't believe you know who l
am" said Mrs. Gayleigh to Tommy
mo, maam," said Tommy, Il don't
know who you are, but 1 know who
you was. heard mamma telling Aunt
Susan."-Harper's Bazaar.
"Oh, Edith! there's that lovely es-
cort you had last summer, the Count
de Lusk, selling ribbons at the further
counterr' $50 1t Is. Don't let us rec
ognize him, dear. He will prefer to re-
main incognito."-PortJ ervis Gazette.
"SingY said the speciality artist to
the manager, 81 can sing to beat the
band" However, on his appearance
that afternoon 1t was noticeable that
the orchestra, as usual, had the better
of the contest.-Indianapol Journal.
Mrs. Al am surprised that your
husband earns so little If he works as
hard as you say. What does he do?
Mrs. B.-The last thing be did was
to calculate how many times a clock
licked in the course of 1000 years.
Philadelphia Inquirer.
"What is all that row. in the dining
room ~ asked the dime museum man.
ager,. with some irritation. ,'It. do be
the glass eater, sor," said the Zulu
chieftain. HE says tn cook give him
a cracked toombler an he cut his toong
on it."-New York Press.
"My DEAR" he said to his lady love,
| 1--WE been busy all day-not manual
| labor, you know, but brain work,
which Is the hardest kind" Eyes, in
deed; know it must be for you," and