davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1896-03-24
The Best Medium.

Newspaper advertising has be-
come the recognized medium for
trade and commerce in every branch
OF business. Agricultural Adver.
Using.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
The Birds Bill Was Locked.

A curious bird tragedy is told
about in the London Field. A man
found a yellow hammer dead in his
yard at the foot of a wall. The bird
had flown against it with such force
as to be stunned. Not only that. but
the upper mandible had been bent
back, and in the Strengthening out
the sharp point was driven down
through the lower bill and locked,
thus booming the bird to death by
starvation. The man sent the head
to The Field.
A good many similar accidents
have been recorded, but it was al.
ways a heavier bird, whose weight
made the springing of the bill easier.
A good many OF the birds were
found in a starved condition, show.
ing that they died lingering deaths
from want of food. Birds that fly
against the lighthouses have the
skull bones crushed and die instant
ly, but others are stunned only.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Shelley and Butter Cakes.

Shelley called on Southey one aft
ernoon and found the latter and his
wife at tea. Southey evinced such
an appetite for buttered cakes that
Shelley vas shocked, and at last
broke out with: "Southey, I'm
ashamed Of you! It's horrible to see
a man like you greedily devouring
this nasty stuff Mrs. Southey
came to her husbands defense with
a long trade, during which Shelley,
abashed, put down his face and Gu
riously scanned the cakes. He broke
off a bit and ventured to taste it.
Then he began to eat as greedily as
Southey himself. When he went
home, his verdict on the cakes was
summed up in the report of Harriet
Westbrook, to whom he vas en-.
gagged: 1--WE we're to have hot tea
cakes every evening forever I was
to make them myself and Mrs.
Southey was to teach me-"
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
The Belated Ones,

1t looks now as if the silver band
wagon would be crowded to overflow
ing by the fellows who have been hold
ing off to find how the squirrel was 60
ing to jump. Having found ont that
free silver has the bulge" they have
run themselves nearly out of breath to
catch up with the procession. We don't
believe much in deathbed repentance,
but being assured on good authority
that "while the lamp holds ont to burn
the vilest sinner may RETURN we well
come the belated ones upon the cond-
ton they do some work meet for repent
ance and do not prove to be "Greeks
bearing gifts. "-Lawrenceville IVA. }
Gazette.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
4 Trying Part.

Plantagenet - Where have you
been for the last month, old chap?
.Maltravers-I've been travelling
with the Power of Love" theatric.
al company.
ENTHUSIASTICALLY! What part
did you have?
Maltravers--Well, in the first act
there's "a love scene, ending in a
prize fight, in which IL of the prin-
cipals is killed by a blow on the jaw.
l was him. Next act there's an elope
ment, ending in a grand railway
wreck, in which the noble engineer
is crushed under the engine. l was
him. Next act, the marriage, fol-
lowed by a grand steeplechase, in
which the favorite falls and kills the
jockey. / was him. Last act, recon-
ciliation and grand hanging scene.
l could have stood that, too, but the
audience always wanted to ring up
the curtain about six times for
cores. Parsons Weekly.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
An Opinion Confirmed,

"This suspense is awful"
The tired nan who made the remark
shat heads this story was concealed in
a growth of underhrush, while near him
were determined men in search of his
whereabouts. He expected to be discov-
cred at any moment, and yet he had
eluded capture for several hours.
just as he was beginning to hope that
he was safe Il fit of coughing told of his
hiding place, and he was in the hands
Of the enemy, and one form Of suspense
was ended.
But he still complained.
"Tnis suspense is awful. 1t is killing
me, y he gurgled ten minutes later.
He had been stealing horses, and the
lynchers had administered the usual
remedy. The suspense did kill him.
| New York World.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Must Face the Situation,

The continued reports from the west
and south of the discomfort and dissat-
isfaction of the agricnlturists and cot
ton planters with tho v ending de-
cline in their products, and the wide
spread sentiment Of western and south
ern states for a bimetallic monetary sys-
tenn, are facts which the bankers, bro
kers and business men of the east can
ITO longer afford to ignore. That the
free coinage Of both metals would re.
store prosperity to all classes of the com
munity is today conceded by some OF
our ablest economists and statesmen.
Can our eastern business men continue
to ignore the sentiments of the west and
south on financial questions? New
York Financial News.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12

ain ordinary conversation no one
would detect that l naturally stutter, -
said A l.. Benedict at the Normandie,
"but such is the fact. When I was a
small boy, | suffered badly, but over
came the linguistic defect sufficiently
to talk smoothly, as a rule. When | con-
verse with IA man who shutters, how
ever, l cannot control myself, and 1 al
ways stutter as badly as he does. This
fact came very nearly getting me in Sc
rious trouble a few days ago in the
mountains Of West Virginia. l was in a
hotel, talking smoothly as / am now,
when Il sufferer joined the crowd. He
listened for awhile, then entered into
conversation with me. At once | began
10 SHUTTER. His face turned red, then
white, and finally he could stand it no
longer.
"Arising from his chair, he began
taking oil his coat, saying: 'S-s-ss,r-
s-s-stranger, | c-~c-ccca-ca cant tt talk
to SIS s-suit yo', but l k-k-k-kin f-f-f
fight Ill like w-w-wildcats. S-s-s-
strip
81 was so excited that the impedi-
mont in ny speech became so prominent
that | could not explain, and he would
not have believed me if / had, so there
was nothing to do but prepare for IA
fight, IN which would have been placed
at II very decided disadvantage. At that
moment the town marshal entered the
room and arrested us both. l explained
matters to the mayor, and he released
as both, letting me have an hours start
to get out Of town before the stutterer
was Turned loose. "-Washington Star.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
PRESIDENTS For Title Hunters.

Tho objection raised by a section
of tho American press against the
frequency of marriages between
Yankee "milliOnairesses" and Brit.
ish and other European ''paupcr"
nOblcmen recalls tho circumstance
that in the seventeenth and eight.
zenith centuries it was the custom
for American gentlemen, descend
ants Of those old English families
who had escaped the Elizabothan
and Caroline prosecutions and set
tied in tho States, to come to Eng
land III search of wives.
Occasionally, too, the American
girl found her husband in the old
country. Thus in 1874 the three love,
ly Misses Carroll of CarrOllton, Bal.
timore, made their debut in London
society and took the town by storm
They did moro; they carried off the
best prizes in the matrimonial mar.
ket of tho period by becoming re.
spectively Duchess Of Leeds, Mar
chioness of Wellesley and Baroness
Stafford. The most beautiful of "the
three graces, - as they were popular
ly called, however, first married Sir
FELTON, Harvey and only became
Duchess of Leeds III 1927 She died
in 1874 These ladies may be said to
have been the pioneers of those fair
daughters Of Columbia who have Sc
lected titled mates in the "old coun
tries. london Chronicle.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Not q Sectional Matter,

This contest is not between the peo.
pie of the west and south and those of
the east. There will be no m%arshaling
OF armies nor will the blood of kindred
be shed i'll Il mighty struggle, while the
money power i'll its safe retreat FORCES
new letters for the limbs of all alike as
1t forged them 80 years g The con-
test is between the whole people in the
east, the west, the north and the south
and the few who i'll the cruel selfishness
OF wealth would make the happy citi-
zens of IA free republic the helots of a
crushing oligarchy, born without a fu-
turc, toiling without Il hope and dying
as die the weeds by the roadside in the
brown autumn. The interests of all the
people are the same wherever their
homes may be situated.
AT present, unhappily, the people of
many of the eastern states do not know
how thoroughly they are serving the
purposes OF the monster of greed, and
at the approaching election a majority
of them will vote in favor of wearing "a
chain stronger and more degrading than
any made of steel. History must repeat
itself. From out OF the west, this time
IN harmony with the south, another
wave must come. Having remedied one
evil, the work must be completed by
the remedying Of those other and gross
er evils fastened on the Union by the
money power, and when the wave has
swept over the land and the rule of the
people is restored, the redeemed voters
of the east will marvel again at the
blindness which now fills their eyes,
Denver NewG
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
IN A JUNGLE STORM
Where the Rain Comes Down Like Bull
lets and All Is Darkness.

Where the Rain Comes Down Like Bull
lets and All Is Darkness.
People who have never been in a
Jungle talk of the sky as a painter
talks of the horizon or u seafaring
man of the ofIing-as if when you
wanted to see it you only need use
your eyes. But i'll the jungle you
don't c the sky-at least you only
see a few scraggy patches Of it over
head through tho openings in the
twigs and leaves. Neither do you feel
the wind blowing, nor get burned
and dazZlcd by the sun, nor even see
that luminary, except by ~momentary
glimpses about midday, from which
it follows that a jungleman does not
usually pretend to be weatherwise
If he does, he Is even a greater hum
bug than the rest of the weather
prophets. On the afternoon about
which We are speaking | remember
setting forth on my walk il the still
glow of the tropical calm and Won
dcring rather at the intense stiffness
of the surrounding forest. Then the
air grew cooler and the green of the
foliage in front seemed to deepen,
and presently there was a sound as
of a giant waterfall in the distance.
Waterfalls do not, however, grow
louder every second, whereas the
nose in front did so. Then there was
Il loud, angry growl as of a dozen
lions. a minute more and the whole
jungle began to roar as if so squad
rons Of heavy cavalry were coming
up at a gallop Then came a drop of
rain and a peal of thunder which
seemed to make the world stop.
Then the storm began. The sky
above darkcned; the trees clattered;
the brushwood beneath Kissed and
bowed itself. A deluge of raindrops
blotted out the narrow view. Down
it came, soaking through the densest
leaves under which one fed for
refuge, striking the grass and sand
with millions of dull thuds, dashing
furiOusly against the leaves as if
they were so many hostile shields,
streaking the air with innumerable
perpendicular lines and hurting it.
self down with the force of bullets.
In such "a downpour one may as well
walk and get wet as stand still and
get wot. Unfortunately one did not
know where to walk to. The cir
cumbeudibUs system" presupposes
the fact that the wagon wheels and
bullock tracks a be seer and noted,
but when the cart track is no longer
u cart track, but "all turned to
rushing waters, such tracks cannot
be seen, and unless you have a peck
ct compass you may as well try to
fly as to get back to where you came
from, When one reads of travellers
lost in the backwoods, they always
steer by the SUI and probably very
badly, but when there is no sun
whataro you to do?-Current Liter
ature.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12

We played a careless, listless game
And both declared twas dull and tame
And fastened to get through it.
And now" said !. 81 know a way
To add some interest to the play,
III ii consent to do it,"
agreed, said she: 'I'm willing quite,
And cen a bet Id call all right,
But I've no money handy"
suppose" said /, "we play like this:
Ill bet you 'gainst a single kiss
A five pound box of candy"
She blushed a little, then she cried:
III do it-luck is on my side
I'll win the wager ~squarely.
Well play one hand of high low Jack"
i cut. and then she took the pack
And dealt each nine cards fairly.
well bid for trumps, then discard three,
"Here's two," cried 1. "Give three, cried
she.
"And heart is what 1 make it,"
The three cards that she laid aside
Down in er lap / saw her hide,
Then chose a card and played it.
And now our interest was intense.
Nor was the game long in suspense,
For easily / won it.
My queen WAS high. my four spot low.
She flushed, got. angry, didn't know
"How in the aorld I'd lone it,"
Blu when ! tried to claim my bet
She struggled hard and somehow let
Those three cards fall unguarded-
The ace, deuce, ten spot at her feet.
Dear girl, she didn't want to beat,
For these she had discarded.
Chicago Times-Herald,
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Filled the Bill,

"Whur is this address:'' asked the
man with the sunburned hair, showing
a newspaper clipping to the depot po-
liceman.
THAT is a vacant lot" said the Off
Ger.
81 allowed it wuz. You see, | saw a
advertisement that said l could get q
pocket fire escape for 80 cents by writin
to this Teller at this number, and as |
thought it might be handy when / come
to town ] sent fer one, an what do You
s'pose | got:"
"Give it up"
"Got il Testament. '-Cincinnati En-
uuirer.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Ruled Out of Turkey.

Here is the latest story of the
Turkish custom house: A richly
bound copy of Herodotus was found
in the trunk of a Greek traveller.
"WhO is the author of this book?"
said an official. "Herodotus. "
What subjects does he deal WITH"
Kings and international conflicts. F."
docs he allude to eastern affairs?"
He treats of nothing else" Where
upon the book was incontinently
oontiscated. London News.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12

An Italian tailor in constant en-.
ployment will make from 81. 40 to
$4.2 0 a week, out of which he pro.
yides his own macaroni.
Appealed to His Sympathies.
What do you think Of the pugilistic
championships asked Il quizzical youth
of the old janitor. .
docs yer mean prize tightin, boss"
eyes"
II d. no much bout 1t, sence Peter
jackson done got outen de push. But !
hyah's er good deal talk over de chal-
lenge dat Corbett issued. / amt got DC
pus'al information, noh friendship in
de 'casion whutsomever. But I hyahs
some talk bout Bob Persimmons, an ]
kahn help err hopefulness dat a gemman
BARN dat name'll come out on top. -
Washington Star.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12

What do the Helgulanders do with
their birds? Some are sent away to
the Hamburg market, and the rest
kept for home consumption Roast.
ing before Il slow fire, with tho trail
on, over toast, is practically an un-
known art, or at least one rarely
practiced Everything goes into the
pot for soup "Trosselsoup" is an
institution much lauded. Mr.. Gatke
tells us how it should be prepared
Take care to commit some 10 or 50
thrushes, according 10 the require
ments Of the family, to the soup
pot, and do not have the fattest
birds drawn, and if the cook is a
true artist, nc one will fail to ask IA
second helping. a favorite Helgo
land dish is kittiwake pie. In No.
vember and December these gulls
are very fat, and when prepared in
Helgolandish fashion are considered
a delicacy, although a somewhat
fishy one. The gray crow is also n
very favorite dish. - Chambers
Journal.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Cause For Thanks.

Eyes" he said reflectively, 81 am
thankful that we are to have a campaign
this summer. Ordinarily I do not like
politics or political excitement, but just
now it creates a diversion that is pleas
ing"
Il don't believe l quite understand
you"
well, l don't think l could stand
another summer of nothing but wheels
and bloomers. ''-ChicaQo Post.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Something Higher.

She-I hope, dear, you were not
thinking of business in church this
morning. You know your thoughts
should be Of higher things.
He-Well, I was thinking of that S22
bonnet of yours. Is that high enough,
think you?-Yonkers Statesman.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
WIFE VERSUS NEW WOMAN.
An Apt Story That Illustrates Forcibly Q
Much Mooted Question.

- CsO' @Atat ~ awe =
Much Mooted Question.
~ popular lecturer recently related
an incident i'll his experience which
girl readers may find amusing and
possibly suggestive. He was invited
by a woman's club to address them
upon the business careers now open
to their sex. When the evening ar
rived, he found the large hall in
which he was expected to speak fill
ed with bright, intelligent women,
most of whom were young. He de-
livered his lecture to attentive lis
teners, aud as he sat down one of
the managers, a pretty, earnest look
ing girl, whispered:
"One thing more. Tell us how
these new careers affect a woman's
chances of marriage"
He laughed. but she was grave.
He fumbled his papers to give him.
self time for a little thought. AFTER
ALL. he said to himself, "this ques-
ton is no joke" CHANGING over the
hall, it occurred to him that while
these hundreds of young women
might or might not be fitted for a
trade or profession, God had planned
each one of them to be a wife, with
children committed to Der care. The
question whether they were shutting
themselves out from that natural
work of life was surely of as much
import to them and to society as
their probable success as clerks or
in any of the numerous occupations
and professions into which women
are now entering.
The choice in marriage still rested
with men Would they be as likely
to choose what is called the emanoi-
pated woman as her domestic sister?
1t was a really serious question, yet
he smiled as he repeated it aloud.
Il have been asked to answer this
query, he said. 1T is too large and
grave a question for me to decide.
But l will tell you a story which
may throw some light upon one fea-
ture of it.
I'm the town where l live is an old
negro named Jacob who is known
as professor He whitewashes
walls and fences, cuts grass and
saws wood. A year ago Jacob took a
young fellow named Tom as partner.
Tom was quick, handy and obliging,
and the business of the new firm in
creased. The professors howell
and cart bore the sign Jacob & Co
in large charcoal lettering.
In a comparatively brief time,
however, Tom disappeared, and the
Co. was blotted from the signs.
"'Where's Tom?' I asked the old
a
81 know muffin about Tom, he
answered. Don't want no SIGH pard-
ner as dat
"'What was wrong, Jacob? He
seemed Industrious and clever
"'Clever enough! Kin saw an
NOW an handle de brush we'll as I
kin, but he took to wearin my clo'es
an smokin my pipe, an calm himself
de actin pardner in de firm. Dom
know he's place. He jes fought he
war meme! Den, sab, I broke de
partnership
MEN," said the lecturer, "are not
wholly unlike Jacob. AS l see them
I think they are willing women
should, metaphorically speaking,
saw or NOW or handle any of their
tools so long as they remain women,
gentle, modest and pure. But when
they usurp the place of men in their
habits and manners and assumptions
they will find it hard to form part
nerships for life with them
Youths Companion.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
The War of the Future,

"How many seamstresses have we
in the army?" asked the g%eneraless,
"Now, what do you want to know
that for?" asked the aid-de-camp,
who had been a hired girl and still
retained her lack of respect for au.
thority.
why, I read somewhere that Ma
poleon often won his battles by
hemming the enemy in. Indian.
apolis journal.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Spelling the Music.

Mother-Come, Fritz, why are you
so naughty today, just when auntie is
paying us a visit?
Fritz-'Cause auntie told me that if l
was a good boy she would sing for us
this evening. -Humoristische Blatter.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Saving Him.

Johnny" screamed his mother.
"why are you sitting on your brothers.
chest? You'll kill him."
81 know it," retorted the urchin.
but if ! let him up he'll go swimmin
and be d-,wned. Adams MASS. }
Freeman.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Easily

owe have decided to shoot you," said
the Spanish official i'll Cuba to the pris-
one who had just been brought in.
"liut my nationality
con, that's easily arranged. If we
find that we have made a mistake, we
Will apologize to your government
latl .'-Chicago Post.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Nothing Too Good For Her.

"You are too good for me-, I" re-
marked the bright girl.
II thought you always said MOTH
ing was too good for you." replied
the cheerful idiot.
Eyes; that's it," murmured the
bright girl.-Philadelphia Record.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12
Runs Through Cars
~TO~

TIME SCHEDULE.
Northern Pacific time card in effect Monday,
June ID.
ARRIVE AT HELENA.
No. ), Pacific Express, west bound $40 q. N.
NO. o. Atlantic EXPIRES. east bound, 400 q. m.
No. 3LivingstOn and Missoula local,
daily except Sunday ............. II 100 u. m.
No, 4. Missoula and Livingston local,
daily except Sunday ............. 400 p. m.
No. 8, Marysville mixed. daily except
Sunday. ..... .......... -. $3.50 a. m.
ly except Sunday. runs from Basin
days, from Elkhorn on Tuesdays,
Thursdays and Saturdays. .......... $50 p. M.
No. 1O2, Rimini mixed, Tuesdays only $50 p. m.
DEPART FROM HELENA.
No. 3, Pacific Express, westbound, 3:45 a. M.
No. g., Atlantic Express, eastbound, 2:O5 q. M.
No. 3, Livingston and Missoula local
daily except Sunday. . 49,. II :05 a. m.
No. 4, Missoula and Livingston local
daily except Sunday 2:l0p. m.
No. 7. Marysville mixed, daily except
No. 10, Wickes and Boulder mixed,
daily except Sunday, runs to Basin
to Elkhorn Tuesdays, Thursdays
and Saturdays. ............. -. 7:l6 q. III.
No. lO1, Rimini mixed Tuesdays only 1850 a. m.
Through tickets to Japan and China, via Ia
coma and Northern Pacific Steamship Co.
For information, time cards, maps and tickets,
call on or write
a. ID. EDGAR.
GENERAL AGENT, HELENA. MONTANA.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12

In Holland the average rate of
wages for skilled laborers of every
description is from s cents to 10
cents an hour.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12

Have l done anything for society?
l have then done more for myself.
Let that truth be always present to
thy mind and work without cessa-
tion.-Simms.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12

Georgia enjoys the complimentary
of the Empire State of the
South from the fact of it's natural
wealth and superior advantages in
industrial and manufacturing lines.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1896-09-12

"Hellc, there!'
"Hello!'
"Is that you, Mrs. Casey?"
cit is"
"Whin you git trough wild yer dress
maker. wOuld you moind sindin her
acrnSt the way to me? l want to put a
Mary Of Midicine collar to my shtriped
whist. D-Iruth