The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1896-03-04
THE HYPNOTlZED REPORTER.

As I am supposed to be hypnotized per.
haps things appear to me in u different
light than they should. Ii Is possible that
] am looking under the surface by the
aid of y rays that are twisted. In any
event there Is much both above and be.
meath the surface that looks queer. One
of the things that puzzled me recently
was the action of certain advocates OF
good government who voted to put the
party in control In our municipal offices
that has already begun TO turn the af-
fairs of the city into a chaotic state. But
this IL an old subject; one that has been
exhausted by. explanatory writer's and
may now be dropped.
-:iI:-
] have also been somewhat mystified by
the agitation over cookery that has caused
talk about the city, and astonished 10
find to what depths Scranton has de-
scended. gastronomically speaking
Maria ParlOa, the celebrated cook who
gave lectures here several years, ago. was
loud in her praises Of Scranton groceries,
Scranton markets, and even went so far
as to display an admiration for Scranton
people. She unhesitatingly declared that
Scranton possessed the finest marketing
facilities of any city that she had ever Wis
tied, outside of the four or five metropoli-
tan cities. Since the arrival of Mrs.
Rorer am shocked to discover that Scran-
ton Is In an alarming state. In addition 10
eating bread, eggs, meat. soup and other
things unhealthy, well meaning but mis-
guided citizens have been using cotton
seed oil to lubricate their entrees. Con-
ISOLATION is derived from the statement
that cotton seed oil is harmless even IL
1t does taste worse than aXle-grease. In
view OF all these facts Il Is hard 10
understand why Mrs Rorer should waste
her time teaching people 10 cook un-
healthy food. Why not give recipes for
the preparation of macaroni. cotton seed
and bean soup and spend the rest of the
course in advising unfortunate residents
to leave the city.
Jill
By the way, another matter occasionally
springs 10 the surface in a way that makes
one nervous. That is the talk Of the germ
enthusiast. This city. like others, Is
blessed with several uneasy individuals
who delight In worrying timid residents
with stories of microbes that threaten to
destroy us. Barber shops are dangerous,
towels and soap positively deadly and citi-
Zens generally are warned not to ex-
pectorate, as the germs will leap from the
dust and take wings on the air and sow
seeds OF disease ard destruction every
where. Milk has become dangerous I'm the
extreme and never should be taken raw.
All kinds of meats are Inhabited by
germs of threa tening character. And
water! The man who drinks water that
has not been boiled down 10 jelly, takes
great risks. No mention Is made of beer
I'm this connection or of the persons who
eject tobacco Juice on the sidewalks. 1t
beer or tobacco. This is the one cheerful
aspect in the germ agitation. Remember,
I do not presume to doubt the statements
of germ experts. / only wonder that we
are yet alive amid such awful surround
ings.
iii
Did you ever consider the peculiar style
of architecture that has chara cterizeI
Scranton's recent building booms? Do
you know that for one decent convenient
modern building erected in the city n
dozen balloon business shanties or ILL
contrived dwelling houses are built? That
where one substantial foundation has
been laid a dozen dangerous structures
have been erected upon almost no founda-
tion at all? 1t Is to be regretted tina
these are facts. Within the fire limits
many flimsy. one-story buildings, with
thin brick walls stand in unsightiy con-
trast beside the handsome edifices that
enterprising citizens have erected on Our
principal business streets. Away from the
business fhoroushfares uncoutf. barn-like
dwellings are springing UP like mush-
rooms on all sides, increasing the cost Of
insurance and damaging property near
These shells are held at a rental that
makes IL impossible for the average ten
ant TO occupy one unless he ttrns IT into
a boarding or lodging house. Many fami-
lies therefore are obliged to forego the
pleasure Of home and camp 0ut," SO to