Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-22


Nothing is more conducive to the en-
joyment of a meal-to say nothing of the
benefits to health-than pleasant, spright-
~ conversation st the table
If, as Shakespeare says, Good diges-
ton waits on appetite" it is very inn
pOrtant that the condition of the mind
should be pleasant when we are eating.
\ custom prevails in many families of
making complaints of the ills of life at
the table The wife and mother retails
the misdeeds of the children and the
shortcomings of the servants; the hus-
band. too often takes the occasion to
complain of the cooking, the eXtrava
gance of the household, and similar
grievances; while the children, taking
up the same tune. tell of the injustice
of their school teachers, and the unpleaS-
ant associates of the schoOlroOm, thus
rendering the time of meeting at the
table season of discomfort to all.
Every mistress of a home should early
teach her family, old and young, that
silence and surlinesS on the one hand,
querulousness and snarling on the other,
are poor aids to digestion. and convert
feast of food into a famine of thought
and goodwill. Somebody wisely says on
the subject: Half the nostrums for
the cure of dyspepsia, headache and sim
liar ills would be unnecessary if domes-
tic troubles were never referred to at
mealtime.
At Whist.--She--'Is Isn't the rule, when
in doubt, play trumps'?'' He-"The
usual rule is, when in doubt, ask what
are trumps.' Puck.
All men can give advice, but few have
the faculty of clothing It in so practical
a dress as the late Mr.. Sturgeon. Mind
you avoid inappropriate texts" he said
one day to his college students. Zone
brother preached on the loss of a ship
with all hands on board from so he
bringeth them to their desired haven
and another, returning from his marriage
holiday, The troubles of my heart are
enlarged. O, bring ME out of my dis
tress! Get among your people or some
body may be saying of you, as one old
lady said of her minister that he was in
visible all the week and incomprehensi-
BILE on Sundays. Shun all affectation in
the pulpit, and mind you never get into
the gOOdygoody style. One of this sort
said: 1 was reading this morning in
dear Hebrews"
He-"My dear, the bank in which my
money is deposited has failed" She
What a mercy you've got your check
book at home, lovev'-Tid-Bits.
Il notice." said an Englishman who
passed through New Orleans recently,
that you of the states have nicknames
for your coins, as we have in England.
You have your nickels and dimes and
quarters or tWobits as they are some
times called, your esgles, and so on
Listen and | will tell you nicknames we
have for our money. A farthing is
called fudge and a ha'penny meg
There is no particular name for penny.
A sixpence is a tanner, a shilling a
bob The half-crown and crown go by
their right names. A pound is called a
quid and a fve-pound note a pony
Money is very dear commodity, and we
all have our pet names for it.''-New
Orleans Times Democrat.
Aunt Hepsy, won't you come to Miss
tried those fancy kinds, but | like green
tea est.'-Brooklyn Life.
The late Lord Chief Justice of Eng
land used to tell his friends this anecdote
at his own expense:
Driving in his coupe toward his court
one morning, an accident happened to if
at Grosvenor Square. Fearing he would
be belated, he called a nearby cab from
the street rank and babe the Jehu drive
him as rapidly as possible to the courts
of Justice.
'And where be they?"
What, London cabby, and don't
know where the law courts are at old
| Temple Bar?"
ooh, the law courts, is it? But you
said courts of Justice
On his way to his judicial seat the
chief justice saw at once that a line
was drawn in the common mind between
law and justice. AS if for instance, while
one was dispensed, the other was dis
pensed with.-The Green Bag.
She-"So Miss Decollette won a hus-
band at lastE He-''Yes; won by a
neck. Buffalo Times.
President Lincoln reached Meade Sta
ton near pptprShurr soon after q Sori-