Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1896-07-16

Inc leading QUESTION OF Inc uay 90
Is, "Mister, what's the score?
Wilmington Star. 'flv tt
Watts-T wonder what kind Of
shirts these can be That are advertised
for 20 centsY Potts-"Married mems"
indianapolis Journal. a i..faE4
Callers-"Are the ladies at homc2
Bridget examining their cards)--
"Spre, ma'am, 1t isn't them that lives
here-it's the McAdamses."-Life.
Tommy-"My pa says it's sin to
swear" Johnny-"Huh! ! guess your
pa never tried to explain politics to
your ma."-Philadelphia North Amcri-
can.
Jim Senn-"Why do they call money
the long green?" Joe Cose-"Nega-
lively, suppose: because without It
you are short and Observation-Disclosures.
North American. alFs
Everyby-"Ths rain is a good thing
for the country. isn't it?" Neverby-
"Oh, l don't know about that. Just
look at what It's done to my straw
hatv'-Roxbury Gazette. nHi 'n'
II like summer: my wife is always
so gentle and amiable in hot weather"
80 is mine; it must be because all the
progressive euchre, clubs have shut
down.'-Chicago Record. u
Then folks from town didn't stay
much Of spell, UNCLE Reub?' Nav:
went back mad cause we didn't hev
no cycle paths an 'lcctric lights In Their
blackberry patch. "-Chicago Record.
Hicks-I saw your poem in the paper
last week. How did you get your pull
with the editor? Wicks-Oh, l didn't
Bother the editor, l called upon tho
business anager.-Somerville Journal.
Mrs. Snobbs-"How many girls do
the Newlies keep" Mrs. Nobbs--"Only
one" Mrs. Snobbs--"Only one? Good
gracious, and came pretty near call
ing there sterday."-Cleveland Lead
err. $40 ff
Husband-I expect some friends Of
mine this evening, and must go out
and buy some cigars. Wife-Why,
thought you bought some for them. II
did, but forgot to get any for myself"
Life.
"Dah's one ting Shore" said Uncle
Eben, "'bout all desher accidents da's
gwineter happen long OBJ de Fohth err
July. Dab ain nobody kin say dey
didn' know twas loaded."-Washing
ton Star.
The merchant Ito his daughters suit
or)-".Now, how are you fixed financial,
iy?" The suitor-"Well, have no
debts" The merchant-"What pityI
Then l cannot give you my daughter"
Sketch.
Mrs. Wallace-Here again, see. why
don't you settle downsto work? Perry
Patetic-Ma'am, would, but somehow
l was always too ambitious 70 come
down to wOrkin' fer day wages Gin
cinnati Enquirer. :
Horatius (the good one)-Pa says X
I'm real good he'll take me to the cir
Gus. Thomas 1.-THE bad one)-Aw, rats.
Yer amt got no brudders ner sisters-s
do ez yer please. Yer de only excuse
he's got.-Judge. ~.
Il am glad to see you looking SO much
better than when l met you last, Miss
Quickstep." "Why, when was that, Mr..
SpoonamoreT Last Thursday, on the
boulevard. You were riding bicycle"
Chicago Tribune.
what did the stranger say when you
gave him the billY" Waiter-Such mon
strous prices he never saw; we were
az abominable gang of thieves. Hotel
g. .I,xs%
abusive, Acknowledgements Blaetter.
Wardpull-I believe 1t would be n
good idea to nominate Bzskpxski. He's
a mighty good man. Heclah-Oh, he's
a good man all right, but how could we
ever get up campaign yell on such q
name as that?-Indianapolis Journal.
Mistress Ito servant looking for a
PEACEFULLY don't you show your book
Of references? Servant-Because do
rot wish to reflect on the character OF
the employers who change their SER
wants every ortnight.-Fliegendc Blaet-
ter.
Tyre-Bilkins and his wife have
bought bicycle built for two. Rider
All! Riding tandem, Ell? Tyre-Well:
judging from their wobbllng perform
ancc yesterday, should say they ware
Just riding at random.-PhiladeIph
North American. ~ f,Eyt3 ane
Here comes that Miss Eighty with
her loud skirt. The, hateful thipgw
Il don't see anything loud about her
skirt.'k "Heavens! Can'tyou hear thar
rustic ?" christmas! i wonhi gftc $40
extra for rustic in Il skirt like that
Co., rcranc,.fof wavAceiuf tss. no
Kate-Mame Carson is terribly mash
ed on Charley Sweetser.. Edith-what
makes you think so? Kate Why, he
has been three weeks trying to teach
her to ride a wheel, and she doesn't
make the least progress. The very in
slant he let's so of her she falls or
Boston Transcript.
"Well, after dinner Boresome told a
story about his exploits in Africa and
then one about an Irishman he met in
Switzerland" But Thought you wee
not at the banquet?' "Nor was l at
this particular one. but I have attended
sixteen others where Boresome told
these stories. Washington Times.