Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1896-04-16

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"Man wants but little here below"
At least, so he observes
When he compares his wants with what
He thinks that he deserves.
Indianapolis Journal.
Fogg says that to borrow ten dollars
from friend must be considered an
X-raise OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES Tran
script.
Muggins-"Did you ever attend box
party at the operaY Buggins-"No;
I'm too fond of music. "-Philadelphia
Record.
Papa, what is walk In lifep" 1t
is that procession, my boy, in which ev-
erybody has to run like mad, or get
left."-Chicago Record.
Perkins Ito Jenkins)-T heard this
morning that Barlow had been arrest
ed. What has he done?" Jenkins-"Ey-
erybody."-Harper's Bazaar.
"Oh, can recommend him to you.
He is obliging, he knows his work, he
is honest" "But he stole my watchg'
"Yours, toov'-New York Times.
''You don't see spring signs in this
city much, do you?" "Oh, yes; crowds
get bigger every day in front of bicycle
show windows. Chicago Post.
Mrs. Musicus-"Did you have much
trouble In learning to sing so beautiful
ly" Miss Frankly-"Yes; especially
with the neighbors." Plain
Dealer.
He can't pay his board, for his star of
success
Beneath the horizon has sunk;
He's an elephant now on his landlady's
hands
And that's why she's holding his trunk
New York Sun.
EFF yoh argifies wifi er smaht man."
said Uncle Eben, you done git de
wust oh it, and If yoh argies wifi er
fool yoh done vase yoh time."-Wash-
ington Star.
Young Duff never talk about
things that do not understand" Old
Ruff-"Really, you must be the most
reticent young man in the city."-Bos-
ton Transcript.
Crimsonbeak-"Do you know Fucker
ton, the cornetist?' Yeast-"Yes, he
lives within gunshot of me-" well,
you must be a frightfully bad shot
Yonkers Statesman.
Other springs the young mans yearning
Straight his thoughts of love reveals,
But these days his ardent fancy
Lightly turns to thoughts of wheels.
Chicago Record.
What can 1t be that has come be-
tween Dawson and his wife? They
used to be so happy together" Mrs.
Dawson got the chafing-dish habit"
"Oh, too bad. Poor Dawsonr'-Har-
pers Bazaar.
She-Mary John Smedler! If there
wasn't another man in the world
wouldn't have him. Uncle George
Considering the opportunities that
would give him for selection, I think
you are right.-Boston Transcript.
City lady lin the country)-I get so
impatient for the news out here. The
mails are so irregular! Old-fashioned
grandmother-La! So they was in my
young days. We couldn't trust 'em at
all.-Milwaukee Illustrated News.
II really don't understand" said the
fond mother to the photographer, why
you should insist on charging double
for photographing the baby when even
the grasping street-car corporation lets
him ride freev-Indianapolis Journal.
Though winter cease his buster drear
And skies may smile instead of frown,
We can't believe that spring is here
Until the price of coal goes down.
Washington Star.
Wife-"Shall l put your diamond
studs in your shirt, dear?" Husband
What on earth are you thinking Of?
Do you want to ruin me? / have q
meeting with my creditors this morn
ing."-Spare Moments.
II see you had a shop-lifter at your
place the other day, Berker." Eyes.
It's lucky she came Thursday instead
of Wednesday" "Why so?" Every
thing she took had been marked down
so per cent. If she'd come the day be-
fore, we'd have lost that."-Harpers
Bazaar.
Proposing parties are the rage;
In fact, they're quite the thing.
But the best proposing party
Is the chap who's bought the ring.
Philadelphia Record.
zone of the strong points about tlts
carpet, ma'am," said the salesman, sis
that it won't show dirt as plainly as
some others. You wouldn't have to
sweep it nearly as often as" II
shouldn't have to sweep 1t at at all,
young man." interrupted Mrs. Gaswell.
with much sharpness. "We keep q
hired girl."-Chicago Tribune. g
81 see you have several books by
Charles Reade," remarked the visitor,
who was looking at the library. Have
you Hard Cash hereY ''Of course not.
sir" replied Mr.. Boodelle, the eminent
contractor, with cold dignity. II have
a burglar-proof safe."-Chicago Tri-
bune.
us Mrs. Smith at homer asked the
caller. physically, madam" return
ed the educated servant, "she Is. As
an abstract question, the fact cannot be
denied. But In relation to your desire
to see her, I cannot say definitely until
1 have ascertained Mrs. Smiths wish
es in the matter. Pray be seated until
I have received advices from aboye."-
Philadelphia Times.
-
The Human Brain.
Professor Ranke has submitted to the