The Emmett index. [volume] (Emmett, Idaho) 1893-1925, 1896-10-17
Man wants but little here below.

He wants Il Httlc more.
Truth.
Hell fear the worst. She-Whata
happened. GeorgeE your father has
paid back that $40 he borrowed.
Muggins-Is your son in business,
Bugglns-Hc's contractor. Mugglns.-
What line: Buggins- Dcbts.-pbila.
deiphia Record.
Homekeep-Eve drink any of these
substitutes for coffeei Dayboard.-I
haven't drank anything else for seven
years.-CincinnatI Enquirer
Hedges appy is continually falling
off his wheel Rose-What can YOU
expect from fellow who isn't we'll
balanced. Philadelphia North Ameri-
can.
Summer Is a tough season on us par.
ents." "Why SOP Our daughters
who have been graduated Try to mako
us talk grammatically."- chicago Rec
ord
Fame" said Uncle Eben. IAN jes'
like swingin' In err hammlck. Hit am
mighty good fun eff somebody doan' cut
de string an drap Washington
Star
Does your family sympathIze with
you when you have lnsomnIa:" "Yes.
When | can't sleep | slt up all night
and practice on my accordion. Chi
cago Record.
Though you may not take vacation
On your very slender pay
There is rest and recreation
In the bores that go away.
Chicago Record.
Willle-Grandpa, tell me n story.
Grandpa-Once upon a time, before
people thought of marrying for mon
! ey-- Willie-Oh. don't mean fairy
story.-Norristown Herald.
"Enen," said old Borderkecp. there
comes them York folks. Give the chill
dren little more SNUFF an get 'em ter
sneezin'. We've got ter make 'em think
it's cool here w.'-Judge.
One bitter drop spoils rapture's cup;
When ice sells by the splinter
We cannot can the hot waves MP
To use them in the winter.
Chicago Record.
Il suppose you're fond Of Shaks-
peare," said one legitimate actor to an
other "Of course | am" Then why
In the name of humanity do you Insist
on acting his Observation-Disclosures
Star.
Wlckwire- Have you noticed that
Nudge has quit cigars and taken up
pipe? Yabsley-Yes; | wonder what Is
the cause-has he been playing the
races or getting engaged:-lndianapolis
Journal.
Just ike our hopes,
Which oft vanish in yapor.
Are the candidates promises;
Strong-on paper.
Philadelphia North American
Salvation Army Apostle-lf you
swear at those horses. my good man.
you'll never go to heaven. Teamster
thumbly)-1. knows 1t. mum; but II l
don't I'll never get to Tonawanda.-
Buffalo Times.
Mechanic have Just been married
and would like a raise In my wages
Employer II am sorry. but the COM
pany is only responsible for accidents
that happen to the men while IN the
factory. Brooklyn Life.
Wiggles-''rhe one good thing
about Hicks. He Is always willing 10
admit II when he is In the wrong
Waggles u don't think It Is goou
thing. II doesn't seem to trouble MIN
bit" -Somerville Journal
summered on the Jersey coast
And | am puzzled still.
As twixt the skeeters and hotels,
Which has the longest bill
Louisville Truth
1T seems TO me. Mr.. Stllson, tha'
your new house Is lacking In luuiclous
use of fretwork." "Well. my Wiie VIII
I'LL that deficiency Just as sooh Us sue
gets her eye on those measly closets
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
He-"I am going to pay You the
highest compliment man can pay
woman" She-"Thls is so suuueh-
He-"I know 1t. but came away WIN
out my pocketbook-ca you ic"u me .
dollar until to-morrow"-NeN VOTE
World.
And how Is your papa, Fiddle
Papa is feeling ever SO much better
to-day Il suppose it's the change 10
the weather. NO, ma'am, uaiht the
weather. Mamma has decided TO starr
for the seaside tomorrow -CieNe
, land Plain Dealer.
NO" said Dismal Dawson. IN answer
/ to his benefactor's question. naru
times Is not the best for our business
Nor yet good times. The times ,na'
suits me best is about medluni-wher
the work ain't too plenty, nor money
I TOO scarce. indianapolis Joufnai-
= A little 4-year-old occupied an uppe
berth In the sleeping-car. Awakemn'
} once In the middle OF the nikht a.
mother asked him II he knew where M
: was. 'Tourse l do" he replied =
In the top drawer" Youths Compan
ion.
Il often wonder Just what she think
OF me- said the young married man
1T Is easy to find OUT said the elder!
married man. Just sit down on ne
nat and she win tell you what sh
thinks Of you in less than minute. :
INDIANAPOLIS IOufnof