The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-06-14
-eZE1 61~E,
As a FAVOR TO AUNT SUSAN.
But the Colonel VIII Never Make
Such n Can Again to ObIige Any
Relative

Relative.
From the New York Tribune
II say" said the colonel looking around
the table "did either OF YOU fellows ever
try to hunt up one of your aunts sixth or
seventh cousins whom you had never
seen?"
Me- said Johnson; never had the
pleasure. Kindly pass me the mustard"
Well continued the colonel. stroking
his mustache tenderiy eff ever you get to
feeling too happy for health just you try
IL. It's sure cure for undue JOY.
a few weeks ago. he went on, Il got
a letter from my Aunt Susan. who lives
IN Chicago asking me to look up the sec
ond cousin of her sisters first husbands
step-brother"
Her what?" inquired Johnson, sharply.
Il said it, retOrted the colonel. IF YOU
can understand anything as simple as
tLdt might as Wei give mp trying to tell
TINS story. The lady's name. Aunt Su-
san SAID, was Mrs. James jackson. AS L
don't often have a chance to do anything
Tor Aunt Susan / consulted a directory
with an haste. / found that there We're
tnlfly seven James Jacksous i'm the city"
w hat did you dO2' said Johnson. Put
EN- IN hat and draw one2"
II did think of sending a typewriter
letter to- the hfty-three Mrs Jacksons,"
answered the colonel, asking them II
tncy were the second cousins of the stem
brother Of my Aunt Susan's sisters first
husband, but II occurred to me that one or
Two OF the SeVenty-tWO James Jacksons
might he unmarried, i'm which case they
would probably say mean things about
me, so / wrote to Aunt Susan and asked
ner, Whlcn one OF the elghty-three Mrs
Jdckson's the second cousin of her sis
ter's FIRST husbands step-brother by mar
rage thls one was. and where the devil
she lived. In a few weeks more / got an
answer saying that the second"
Aes' we know what you mean," said
Johnson, IF YOU do speak, Dutch"
wei, all right-she lived al a certain
number in Forty-seCond street. So one
Sunday evening. being in a benevolent
mood, 1 thought I would cheer Mrs. Jack
SON 8 heart with sight of me. j went
When the maid opened the door 1 said,
Is Mrs. James Fl. Jackson in?"
She said she was.
" Please take my card to her said.
She SAID she would. Then she showed me
into the draWing-rOom. which was as dark
as war cloud, and went away without
Ilghung the gas. / tried to find a chair
and fell over "a cricket While / as on all
fours hunting for my hat / saw a mans
figure outlined against the doorway.
" Mr.. er-er-RoWeY he said inquiringly
i said, I am 1T. But j asked for Mrs
Jackson 1 believe-Airs. James H. Jack
son.
oh, he said. Please walk this way.'
4 tried my best but / couldn't He
| Wad5dled like a duck. 1 followed him into
" Maria, he said, This is AIr.-er-Rowe.'
A tall, gray-haired woman with a Ro-
man nose rose from the far corner and
! stood st;ll.
Indeed said she.
I felt encouraged to remark, I dare
say you have heard my name before
" ON, all, yes, to be sure she said, with
a vacant grin. 'Rowe-yes, to be sure. of
course
Having thus been assured that was
welcome, / helped myself to a chair and
went on: My aunt Susan Miss Reed. of
| Chicago, wished me to look in on Won.
She SAID she spoke to you of me last sum
50 Nm, yes-so she did said Mrs Jack
son, looking as if She was having tooth
pulled. so she did Mr.. Jackson was writ
ms letters IN a corner. 1 was looking at
| trying TO remember where had seen worse
ones. suddenly saw the light of a dawn
| ing intelligence in her eyes
" y Ou-yOu-er write, or-Or-sOuetbipor
dom your she said, hopefully, 1 said /
And your mother was-er'-
"She looked as if she was suffering so
sad: My mothers maiden name was
"she fairly jumped at this. You took
the word out Of my very mouth she muir
"Well, after that we got on swimming
~, continued the colonel, helping him
sen Tel, 70 cheese. she asked me how Uncle
oshua was. had never heard of Uncle
Joshua, but I said he had failed a good
deal during the last year
on, then you have seen him recent
w: she asked, in a surprised way
Il said / had"
! didn't know your business would al
low you TO get as far away as New Or
leans, she gurgled.
Il said / had been i'll and went so,+L g.
my health. N'i III
Then She said: Aunt Elias death was
very sad. wasn't it?' was
i SAID 1t was worse than that. and inst
70 seem sociable, l added that her son
musl miss her very much?"
Mrs. Jackson sat up straight stIor
SON, she exclaimed. You mean her
daughter don't you% i0i
u said | did. Ordinarily I sbouId hove
stood my ground, but it wouldn't bsre
Deen polite TO contradict the ladv Tho firs+
tlme met her, and besides / WASN'T IN
lne MOOD Tor argument, anyway
MI jackson kept on writing laf+ars
l was Just thinking / had done nv 49,,
by aunt Susan, when Mrs. Jackson roI,seS
herseI with an effort and said. No -,
know, / believe that | once kissed 80
when you We're a baby SOu
THAT settled it. j don't renoan,ho. g..
how l got into the hall. l believe {{@i9
her ! would come again, but that US
only one more lie. When l cot onnosita
the drawing room, lighted the gas 6S6,S
my hat from under the sofa and tii5,ned
out the gas again. l couldn't swear 49,
1 spoke to jackson when / went o1t ;,
The colonel regarded his plate fb0Ioh+
fully moment Then he looked IN 80
caught the sympathyzing glances Of he
friends. % ms
Don't ever do it, boys" he said.