Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1896-11-18

WO1udu WIZ SelS lue uTSC SIdft."-Nau
York Sun.
Il do not believe that l have n trro
friend in the world" $50 you bava
been trying to borrow money, too, haye
you?"-Truth.
"Madge, why do you always buy
your books at dry goods store?" "Be.
cause-it doesn't give me such sbock
when the clerks know nothing about
em."-Puck.
Unmarried Sister-Do you think
Jacks yacht will be becalmed? Mar.
ried Slster-I could tell you better if
l knew that women were ON board. NV
dear.-Pick-MeUp.
what would you do, dear, If were
to die?" asked Mrs. barley, fondly. IT
don't know" replied barley, thought.
fully; (which is your choice, burial or
mation?"-Judge.
81 really think that the bike was the
cause of MacNab marrying Miss
Smithers." "That's odd" "Not at all.
You see, they were thrown so much in
each others ociety."-Judge.
His Way of Putting Its there
one fountain pen better than another"
"Well, no; should say, however that
there are good many fountain pens
worse than thers."-Chicago Record.
He pinned upon his overcoat-
That sneering Johnny Power
A big chrysanthemum and said
"That's what caulifower."
Chicago Tribune.
II wonder If that diamond Nudge
has is of the first water" Il doubt 1t.
it must be of the tenth or eleventh
water by this time. "-Indianapolls
Journal.
"See here, waiter! Those eggs are
not cooked properly" Il know 1t, sir;
but you said they were for your wife.
and [ knew If the lady was your wife
she couldn't be very particular. "-Yon-
kers Statesman.
'All | ask" said the man with the
business CLINT in his eye, is that they
will give me plenty of rope" Then 1t
was that they recognized him as
manufacturer of campaign cigars
indianapolis Journal.
"See how clean of snow Browns
sidewalk is and look at Jacobson's
next door," Eyes, but you don't I'M
derstand." 'What?" 81 saw Brown
borrow Jacobson's snow shovel two
hours ago."-Chicago Record.
Mr.. Henpect (anxiously)-Can
bring proceedings in court, Mr. BaS
stone. to set aside my wifes VIM
Lawyer-Why, your wife isn't oeaa
man, is she? Mr. Henpect-No; thats
Just the trouble.-Somerville Journal
Mrs. Snaggs (who was school teacn'
err before her marriage)-The scienunc
name of the turkey Is Meleagrls da'
lopavo. Mr.. Snaggs-We will aDole'
waite that name to Dennis for lis
time being.-Pittsburg Chronicle'Iele'
graph.
"Father," said the small boy, "wpas
makes piano players wear their nais
long?" Don't bother me, Johnny.
But, father, l wish to know" on-
it's so the public won't be able TO seu
how much their heads have sWeiieu
Washington Star.
Mrs. Lightly-You used to cal iso
"dear" before marriage, you never u.
now. Mr.. Lightly-Before l narrieu
YOU thought you dear; now kno"
you are dear, very, very dear inV ~
dear to my purse than my hear@-A'
Date.
Youth with incipient beard)-l want
a bottle of face lotion. Drusglsl-oo
you want something to use AFTER sna..
ing? Youth (confidentially)-No! Lou
see I'm raising a beard, and | wan'
the face lotion for my tiancee.-fnn'A'
delphia Record.
What on earth have you been ~,
ing. my child?" exclaimed cannes
mother as the little girl came into lno
room with her hair all awry ana lei
dress torn in a dozen places. "fMl.r
in shoppin', ma'am!" was the rep!
Yonkers Statesman.
"You are worth your weight In go'u
to me, darling" he .murmured. lnsa
do go home early, George, DEAR 81.
replied, YEARLY. 'T've lost ten pounu,'
since we became engaged, just ~
ting up with you. We can't afford s'O'
Observation-Disclosures Bazar'
Lad of 10-I say, pa, what y 49, a.
meaning of these numbers ut, the HI II
tom of every picture? Look 'at sn ~,
one: Shakespeare, 49,, Perplexea, ' ~
Their (who has never been 'in'a sol'e ~.
before)-O!-ah!-I expect. that ~ sa
telephone number. = Humoris''''''
Blaetter. s.s n
81 love to hear you talk, my dea, ~.
said Mr.. Bickers to his wife, wheh 1I u
paused to take breath Mt the enu
the second column of Il curtaln-'oo'' 20.
"but your volubility Is reaHy p
lection on my wisdom" how IA IA,
Because a word to the wise % -
| cfent, "-JIltl1e