Evening star., 1896-09-19
THOMPSON STREET BICYCLE
CLUB.


1t was clearly evident to the sixty or more
members Of the Thompson Street Bicycle
Ciub VINO waited for the regular weekly
meeting to open that President Toots had
something on his mind of considerable i'm
portance. He looked anxious and worried
and the routine proceedings were hurried
over in e manner to rhow that his interest
was beyond. There were various surmises
Of coming disaster, but no one suspected
| the truth until 1t fell from his lips as he
stood up. with trembling knees and broken
voice.
My frens," said the president as he
arose In his place. de painful dooty de-
wolves upon me president of dis club
to break de news to yo' dat Brudder Slip
back Taylor am 10 mo on de face of dis
airth. He wss. yo' all know. one of de
charter members of dis club. an a
who took de greatest interest in all our
proceedings AT noon today 1 met him on
de street az he was suckin' a lemon an
carryin home a porous plaster fur his back
His eyes had a furaway look, an j noticed
dat he had limp. but he peared 10 be in
good health an speerits. Two hours ago
he was found hangin' to a tree in his back
ya'd at the eand OF a clothesline. HIS wife
fust thought he WAS playin a game on her
to find out how much she luved him, but
alas! the drefful truth was soon apparent.
Brudder Taylor was as dead as a doah
nail an as cold a piece of sheet iron in
| Jinuary.
| Cause md Eject.
| WAS domestic onhappiness de reason fur
dis tragedy" continued the president, as
| he wiped away a tear. NO. Things went
| all right at home He was not hard up.
| He was not sick. He had no secret sorrow.
| II was a plain, straight case of cause an
| effect. De bike de cause, an de effect
| vas dat he was found dead. Brudder Tay-
| lor was a man sixty vars ole. Fur de last
ten Vars he has had rheumatic. biles chill
| blains, lame back, heart disease. arthma an
| s.beral other ailments an II dar had been
| hundred fat an juicy watermillyons Jest
| ober de fence he could not hev clumb ober
| to git cne 1 was mo dan surprised when
| he jined dis club. 1t didn't seem to me dat
he could ebe- be able 10 ride de wheel but
| he would listen to no argument He jest
| made up his mind dat de wheel was good
| fur what aiied him. an dat a five-mile spin
befo' breakfast would soon make young
| man of him, an IL was no use to hurt his
| feelin's ober de matter. Muffin has eber
happened TO gin me mo- pain dan TO watch
de efforts Of dat pore ole man to conker de
| wheel He was up befo' daylight an out
| arter dark. Sometimes he would come
| home limpin' on boat legs-sometimes dey
would bring him a dray. He fell on his
head on his ear on his back, on his side.
He got bruise at cherry rod. an he left
piece of hide on cherry block. He run into
fences street kyars. ice wagons. hacks and
pedestrians. an vehicles of varus sorts an
kinds run ober him. Policemen threatened,
women wept an men guyed him. hut he
kept right on. He was gwine TO ride dat
| bike or die.
| The End Finally Came.
| "Dis AFTERNOON Brudder TAYLOR went out
| as usual 10 hev hts usual struggle Wild de
wheel. He bad cooked de saddle up. soaked
de chain an blowed UP de tires. an de
feern' had come TO him dat success was
| within his reach. Nobody happened to see
what followed. Il am 'sposed. howeber,
1 ii in, a Of ba
attempted a fiyin mount Befo' dat he had
always got up tree to drop into de saddle.
| DE attempt failure. When he riZ on
| has toe his bike started off. So fur i
kin trace il by scraps OF clothin' an loose
| buttons il cantered ober hoSs block.
Godged three times around a shade tree an
! den galloped across de street an uISot
laundry wagon an brung UP agin a brick
wall. Brudder Taylor was found on de
ground wild his legs tied in hard knot an
is head driven down so fur lords his heels
dat dey couldn't fnd his neck to put
| piece of ice on it. When dey got niin on
tangled he advised TO 20 home an
stick TO r5ckn' cheer de balance of his
| Gays, an he limped away widout a word.
| He went straight home, passed into De back
ya'd an de next seen of him he cold in
death. He had evidently cum to de con-
clushun dat de bike fur him. lie
bad planned an anticipated an de reaction
! had bin too much fur him. Feelin'
, dat life widout de bike would be dreary
waste. hevin made up his mind
, at last dat he was beaten man. he put lie
! moose ober his head an let his specrit sail
, away to dat land whar' a par of wings
| kin Gin de bike ten rods de start an beat
| IL home cherry day in dc week. Brudder
Taylor was sot in his ways, but he
| good man an a loyal friend. Each member
| of de club viii wear de usual badge OF
, | mournfr' fur de next thirty days. an de
sum of SO will be sent to de grievin' wild
| der to help pay funeral expenses.
g Gone on Their Bikes.
AN I hev another startling piece OF
news fur de members of dis club" contin-
: uei the president. after a pause. Last
s | night Brudder SHUTDOWN Smith an de wife
e | of Brudder State Rights Thompson went
| cut for a spin in de gloamn'. DER lamps
| was lighted. DER chains dooly creased. an
= dey carried along de usual forty-two
! wrenches. oil cans an oddor implements of
repair. De gloamin' gloamed an as dey
. rode away de freHes flew about an de
+ | whippoorwill sang his song of love. Brud-
!, | der Tn ompson put de chillen 10 lie l. an
q | den sot up an waited wild his feet in a tub
! | of water. De clock struck 'leben an twelve
8 | an an two, but his wife returned not.
de hours crept slowly on. an when day
a | Hight cum an she still missin he
4 | knocked at my doah. We consulted de
e police an visited de morgue, an IL was
n three hours befo' We learned de truth.
e Brudder Smith and Sister Thompson had
q sloped, an befo' daylight thirty miles
d away an still pedalin'. Dis de fust
O case of slopement on de bicycle white or
J. | black, to be recorded in de history of de
e orld, an while our sympathies may go
out fur de stricken husband. can't help
n but feel a leete proud ober de sarcum-
z | stance. Brudder Smith had only sixty cents
in his pocket when dey started an we may
= recken on seem boat of 'em widin a week
or so. Dey will. of co'se. De expelled from
e de club, but If Brudder Thompson hin ober-
n look de matter an take his wife back we
| shan't hev a word to say. Ii was predicted
r. | long ago dat de day would cum when &c
| bike would be used fur jist sich purposes.
l. an while de majority OF us smiled at de
n ideah We hev now got oar eyes opened, an
e kin take proper precaushuns. Do res. OF
Il yo' kin do as yo' please, but as fur me.
n either ride out wild Mrs. Toot when ds
d gloamn' comes an de whippoorwill sings
Is | or she stays at home an puts de chillen tC
II he'd an picks up de Goldfish fur breakfast
ID | Not dat 1 hewitt confidence in her an G'
8. members of dis club but bekase dar an
lie no tellin what sort of a new iieah dat bike
y am gwine to bring out next, an a prudent
h man am allus prepared fur all emergencies
ID | We will now adjourn.
/