Mexico weekly ledger., 1896-11-19
THE TROUBLES OF THE BoWsERs.
Good Mrs. Bowser, Like the Proverbial
Worm, Concludes to Turn.

on the hearth rug, ''do you know that
you have got to make a radical change
in some of your little ways or / shall
know the reason why?n
"W-what!" gasped Mr.. Bowser az
he looked and then rubbed his eyes az
if wondering whether he was awake
or dreaming.
ssFor instance" she continued, 81
want you to keep out of the kitchen
and stop being a hen-hussy. You are
always poking around there and both
ering the cook, and 1 want it to
cease!"
"You-you are talking to me!'
whispered Mr.. Bowser, looking at her
in the strangest sort of way.
eyes, sir, I am talking to you! You
found fault with the meat tonight.
Don't do it again! / buy the meat,
and what's good enough for me is
good enough for you. If you don't
like my table you can go to a restau-
rantl"
MIR. Bowser opened his eyes and
mouth and stared at her. Was it Mrs.
Bowser who sat there? Was that Mrs.
Bowser's voice? Was this his wife
who had permitted herself to be bluff
ed and brow-beaten IN a hundred oc-
casions when he felt "off" and wanted
to take it out of someone? He pinch
ed his legs; he reached up and stroked
his nose. Yes, he was awake, and
that was Mrs. Bowser, and she was
giving him 'ssass." He must sit down
on her at once and with the utmost
emphasis.
tsMrs. Bowser-woman!" he shout
ed, as he sprang to his feet-"What
on earth do you mean by such Ian
guage? Do you know who you are
talking to?"
"Sit right down, Mr.. Bowser," she
quietly replied, as she looked him in
the eye. 81 know who I am talking
to. My language is all right. You
are spending altogether too much
money in cigars, billiards and at the
club. I am wearing a pair of darned
because I have to econo-
mize, while you think nothing of
throwing away $40 a week. Afterthis
you come down to two"
"By the great horn spoon, but"
''It's no use, Mr.. Bowser," she in
"We are not talking about
horn spoons or any other sort of
spoons. In looking over my closet
to-day 1 found a lot of your collars
and socks there. They are on the floor
in front of your dresser, together
with cuffs, neckties, shirts and vests.
When you 60 upstairs you either put
them away or I'll throw them out of
the window! You have 10 more order
than a pig, and I've got tired taking
care of your things. I notice you are
wearing a new pair of shoes which
must have cost 81 or IS, while you
have two or three half worn pairs in
the house. 1 must buy SO shoes in or
der to economize, and wear them I'M
til my toes stick out. There must be
a change, Mr.. Bowser!"
He was looking at her, his face white
and red by turns, and his eyes bullying
put as if a ghost stood before him.
"And another thing" she went on;
''this buying patent medicines and
gim-cracks has got to come to an end.
If your stomach can't get along with
out a new brand of sarsaparilla or bit
bers every two or three days, with
syrup or pills for your
liver between times, you'd better go
to bed and die decently. The money
you throw away on such stuff
would buy all my Clothes"
Mr.. Bowser tried to get out of his
chair, but his knees were SO weak that
he couldn't stand up. He tried to
speak, but his tongue seemed to be
fast. Mrs. Bowser looked him
over and then said:
81 was looking into your dresser to-
day and I noticed a bottle of hair dye.
The idea of an old man like you, with
a bald spot on top of your head, dye
ing your hair and trying to deceive
the public! Every time you see me
use a powder rag you sheer about it,
and yet you buy hair dye, and have
probably been to some "madame' to
have your wrinkles removed! Are
you fixing to frisk around as a gay old
"Wr-wo-!"
That was all. He couldn't get a
whole word out, while his face was SO
red that Mrs. Bowser feared a stroke
of apoplexy. She had more to say,
however:
"Every now and then you threaten
me with a divorce ease and talk about
my going home to mother. If you
want a divorce why don't you apply
for it? l have a deed to this house
and lot, and as for my going home to
mother, or going anywhere else, don't
you worry! I propose to stay right
here. If anyone leaves, it will be you!
The idea of a man getting up and
brow-beating and bulldozing as most
of them dol Their wives ought to sit
down on them like a ton of brick!
There's another thing, while 1 think
of it. You have been interfering with
my management of the house. / want
you to stop it! When / don't know
how to manage a couple of servants
I'l send in my resignation on a postal
card. You told the last cook you were
sorry that she had to work SO hard,
and you limited that I was too hard on
her, but she came right to me and
called you an old polly wolly and quit
at a days notice."
Mr.. Bowser wasn't quite dead, but a
at him would have satisfied
anyone that he was on his last legs.
"That's about all for this evening""
said Mrs. Bowser, as she rose up, shut
may resume tomorrow night. 1
shall be quite busy for the next two
hours, Mr. Bowser, and If anyone calls
you a say Pm out. In case you SO
desire, my lawyer viii see your lawyer
in the morning. Goodnight, Mr..
Stay! If you
have toothache during the night don't