The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-09-27
POET on ms HANDS,
The Celebrated "Bard of Eikton may
Advertised For Sale

m. Celebrated "Bard of Eikton" May De
Advertised For sale.
w,cr1rNGTON. D. G.. September "a
- 1,fa noet cannot forget the sull-
ttide Of the mountains. lilueT1, ,,,,'aJ
.,L 10 ufincst difficulty that Puisuati-
al him 10 come away from I'M
-" ,,'n,,rtains Of the good state OF vi
we il0 ,,bero the poet had become at
ee',,r.ii,od and endoared 10 many OF NlIsiIil1 -
ling shirts. He's sworn on Ho"'
Eut SERIOUSLY. the Bard OF Iik lon 49,
-v.d on interes- once In your Stdle tlI@
r,..G,,nes him in many hearts tnere. dno
me- complains bitterly Of being nuucsu
~ leave the quiet and solace Oh liiou-'
tafn and valley" and the enterlaiu,niten,S.
~ ..old-fa : hioned Southern nosl'sitt'
"a -. r. arv commotion Of Washing
~ lie lamenfs his lost solitude, ana re-
rnses 20 be cOmfOrted. AS pIous lir
min away with me from our JOIN sui'iI I,.-
outing j am prone 10 SYN p1'l 5i.,,r ia
,la-not too much--with the olSgr uiilleu
bard In vain remind MN VI 'N0
lie meaning OF his lines
"The wash OF me flowing river'
When day IS done and gone' d.
Sound In my ears forever, f~
am never more alone
He saws: go hang tho WASH -
In vain ! eNpostulate with him-reflhnu
MIN that ! am not laundry. IL - 10
matter" as the fellow says IN the tIaeS-
9v. the poet wiz have none OF H. A..
qbe first CLEAN Of real interest ina
have seen tighten up the duh swart OF
nav IA, 49, forl, satlirnine cOuntenance
since our arrival at the Capll"i -
Inc other day when, accompanied ~ - ~
hard | dropped I'm AT CongresSi0 hdi ,oili-
mlttee Headquarters 20 49, he
Faulkner Entire nous don , DelIe'e M ~
no.t ever saw a politician before ne
aNable and magnetic Statesman 44"i-
West Virginia was gao 10 see ny tni, 9"
we have kindly acquaL'l ,s,,t y'bila and
~ moot stood OF and viewed our metDuE
crri6uslv When The poet ana Wlthuie"
from the presence OF the shIeWu OoHs
si0nal manager 1 was hTCLsh' out VI "
nrorciind I'm of abstraction, that am sun
iect 10 myself at times, by Keen @ ~.
relentless dig in my night TICS. LoOA.tts
ouieliv around / found | was paying lht
penaltv OF a momentary forgetfulhess Oh
tho poets existence. ,, .,,.t +,,,c-
Il spoke tC you twice salu lnS' A"''O
''o DD,fi vou9" .aid. rubbing my side.
where the Jingle Of HIS bony elbow-joint
YET sent llttle electric shoots through
my anatomy. ,n.. r,.,,,,,,o- "
"Wel. don't demonstrate II en- Rim IN
.ha vav Won have demonstrated II On me.
or You'll have trOuhle! ] growled.
After this we came along COVE 10 the
. .(yry Sdidn.t yon Introduce me to any
one al headquarters. Just now ashed
nv COMPANION. breaking the silence which
was momeLtarily growing So tnick you
co "yon ''1 looked So confoundedly glum
fsncied you would insult him. l amiaply
don't know what to do with This poet.
In, sure / believe III advertise him;
perhaps some one will buy MIN:
noticed the poet was silent LOT long
ish stretch for the poet. for with all the
hard's maunderings about solitude ara
silence and the Ike. he cculd rlNdl san
ors parrot when yOu get his poeuc jaws
once started: so. ] say he was silent for
quite a longlsh spell. when presently ne
broke the silence again:
"See here Voorhees," be SAID. turning
10 me abruptly. and causing me TO halt
so suddenly 30 front OF TWO handsomelE
dressed ladies' that one fell on the back or
nv neck "See here. DO you suppose
Faulkner would want any campaign poet
Here was my chance. on most unex-
pcctcG-most blessed relief. Set him 10
haunting the political headquarters. Oc-
cupationi why IL would relieve every
soul concerned in the transaction. IL say.
el his ceaseless torture OF myself caused
hv his inadaptability 10 the practlcal
thought Of the city: Il relieved the poor
devil himself. for the wholesome erect
OF employment is too well known 10 need
comment. and IL would AFFORD the poiucSl
organizations a legitimate lsafety-VaiNe
] thought "Did ! think Senator Faux
ner wodl1 want any campaign poetry in
deed"
How ever. l became very crafty. What
IL the bard should take alarm and re-
consider "Ohi no." ! said 20 myself, lay
ing my finger along the side Of my nose.
and even then changing the action into
an ntimatiOn that my nose itcRed, mot
much-I guess not. my lad, I've got you,
thought l, Slancing asAance at my VIC
tim.
Hes writing campaign poetry FOR every
political orean.zaton In the city. ] chnc-
| kle sometimes when passing the open
window lOf a political headquarters /
catch the faint tinhling music Of a yolley
OF choice political oaths. and immediate
| " am treated with q SIGHT Of the poets
lank v.sage Issuing from the door. re
has not seen NE, 50 ] hide am told
that go one day MS reputation has be
come scmetf'ng phenomenal Unlike
politicians. MS poetic uttcrances become
adaptable TO ary political creed. For IN
stance.
l love the y orlo pclitlcal.
And fsln World de for country, gov
erpmoni and friends.
7 have no selfish purposs
! on either side ~orid lose
10 save myself from dishonest. mean.
OF unfair ends
I'm the pink Ct all pro?riety.
| TIE region OF sobrieiy.
You can rot see ~ Ike 10 baseness IN
asv way compared.
/ Look lcrF rpcn 10y wonders.
: Bear o. love. fte rumtl.ge "a inisrs
! ~ virtues Ike 20 these Tor the mnlenn-
.lm 20 prepared
"vou know. for rolliics Ia die.
| You kaOw. for others Ills / cry.
| have 70 selfish motive. aim intention;
| or course YOU know these things,
| And trat / m against all rings,
| But still l thought I'd anorf you the
| advantage OF my mention"
| JAMES PAXTON VOORHEES,.
The Offices OF the Keeicy Institute OF
/ Nira.Lnla. are now L-caiot In RLcnmond a.