Hopkinsville Kentuckian. [volume] (Hopkinsville, Ky.) 1889-1918, 1896-02-18

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~< heads" said
President Howell, as he called the
meeting to order, land / have almost
forgotten where we left off. It is un-
fortunate that this hiatus had to oc-
cur, but in the plenitude of my wis
dom / deemed it best to take rest.
You see our proceedings were getting
a little too interesting for some par
ties and they were losing sleep at
night in trying to make up their
minds whether to break the peace or
leave town. Now that things have
cooled off, let us all take a fresh
start and not let our proceedings
cause anybody to lose his religion"
The secretary was absent and as
nobody seemed to remember what
the unfinished business was, the
Clubs usual rules were relaxed and
the meeting partook largely of free
for all discussion of things in gen.
eral.
Col. Walter Kelly brought in the
petition of Mr.. Frank Ort, the new
gas man, and there was murmur of
opposition.
Col. Pyle said he thought it was
unfair to President Howell, since the
question of gas had been mentioned,
to let Mr.. Ort in.
President Howell removed his
quid and asked Col. Pyle if his re-
marks contained any reference to an
allusion that could be construed into
an implied insinuation.
On being assured by COL Pyle that
he hadn't said anything that he didn't
intend to say, Col. Howell said it af-
forded him pleasure to accept the
apology SO gracefully offered.
Col. Kelly made strong speech in
Mr.. Ort's behalf. He said there was
nothing short about Mr.. Ort except
his legs and his name. He was a
gentleman of acknowledged anagos-
ity. He had come all the way from
Ironton, Ohio, to join this Club and
it would break his heart to be denied
admission. He was eligible to mem
bership under any rule adopted. He
had no hair on his head worth speak
ing of, and what little he had was
red. He closed by moving that Mr..
Ort be brought in and his head sub
jected to the usual examination be-
fore the whole Club. This motion
was carried unanimously.
Col. j. O. Cooper and Col. Walter
Kelly were sent out to escort him in.
The first glance at his head was
enough to satisfy everybody and Col.
Pyle got up and withdrew his obiec-
tions, remarking: 81 now think, to
be Frank about it, that we Ort to let
him in"
As the egg basket happened to be
empty Col. Pyle escaped assault, as
it is against the rules of the Club to
hit a member with anything more
deadly than hen fruit.
Mr.. Harvey Smith, distinguished
baldheaded warrior from Pembroke,
was present as a visiting member.
None of the members present knew
Mr. Smith, though several of them
said they had heard the name before.
Mr.. Smith was given an opportunity
to address the meeting and he made
stirring talk on the Cuban war and
closed by calling for volunteers to
start next Friday for Havana to join
the Cuban army.
Col. Birch Bassett said he didn't
Havana objections to going, but he
expected to start east in few weeks
and would rather wait until smother
time. ... .
Col. Buck Leavell said he was
anxious to go, but he got seasick SO
easily that he would wait until the
gulf frcze and would then cross on its
bicycle.
Col. Bob Woodbridge said he was
spelling for fight and would Ike to
shed few gallons of Spanish blood,
but he didn't propose to start any
where on Friday, as it was an un-
lucky day.
Col. Bill Cooper said he needed
the exercise, but had promised his
friend Tom Edison to meet him in
New York next week and let him
photograph his brain with his new
process
At this remark of Col. Cooper's,
Coils. Joe Twyman, Lem Mckee and
Tom Williams INDUCED in horse
laugh, which Col. Cooper took as an
insult and left the room-b being I'M
able to take it with him.
Col. John Moayon said he was go
ing to Mardy Grass this week and
would go with Col. Smith as far as
New Orleens.
This proposition was declined and
Col. Smith retired in disgust, saying