The News-Herald. [volume] (Hillsboro, Highland Co., Ohio) 1886-1973, 1896-06-18
OUR CELESTIAL COOK

- Il Il
eve have certainly solved the prob
lem Of bachelor existence" said Robin.
son over coffee and cigars. ':The deep
rooted tradition that women alone are
qualified to keep house is ridiculous, for
I defy you to find a more comfortable
establishment Of its size than this one
Of Brown, Jones and myself"
"True, true" said Thompson, who
lives in boarding house and hence is
rather pessimistic, ''but you must re-
member that you have had only three
months Of it, and"-
"See here, Thompson, I cried,
"there is no use in your trying to scare
us. Everybody told us that for three
bachelors to even dream Of keeping
house was the sheerest madness. I have
tried your boasted boarding houses,
have risked life nightly facing storms in
search Of dinners, and now for one can
say that for solid comfort I'll take our
modest apartment and the productions
Of our own kitchen. Why
"But you have not come face to face
with the servant problem, interrupted
our cynical guest.
''The servant probleml'' exclaimed
Brown. why need we ever face it
while Wing Song lives Where could
you get better coffee than this?''
"Ah, there is the guardian angel Of
our household, said Robinson. "It was
. red letter day in our lives when we
ran across our almond eyed major domo.
He runs the house as he chooses, and he
runs it we'll. Of course he has his faults,
but on the whole he is the best natured,
the most faithful creature in''-
''But Jones says he reads your let
tersl'
"Now, Thompson, you are converting
mole hills into mountains. What If he
does? He can't understand them" said
Brown.
"But the very thought Of it would
drive me wild"
"Wing Song can read my letters to
his hearts content, ventured warm
ly, land enjoy the little he gets out Of
them as long as he continues setting be-
fore me his excellent cooking and keeps
the apartment in its present spick and
span condition"
"But Brown says that he has broken
several handsome pieces Of china that
he prided himself so on having selected,
at good prices too"
"A small matter, small matter, 4"
said Brown. 1--WE can afford to pay the
damage done by such servant. Just
last night he came''-
Robinson in warning, "Sshl'
There was a soft patter Of sandaled
feet, and q yellow face, above which
arose dome Of tightly rolled cue,
appeared at the door.
That door had been closed, fact not
in itself strange, but yet it always
seemed in a measure to bear on an Incl.
dent that occurred on the following
day, when. after breakfast, Robinson
and were sitting over our morning pa
pers.
''Mista IIobinson.
We looked up from our reading and
saw standing before us our servants, I"
as we called him. his face fixed in an
impenetrable calm that we knew por-
tended o matter Of import.
"Well, Wing Song?'' inquired Robin
son, who by virtue Of his seniority we
had constituted manager Of our house.
hold.
The servants" for a moment fingered
in silence the hem of his long white
coat. Then he spoke: "Me velly solly,
Mista Lobinson, but I have tloo much
wolk. 20 in laundly an makee tlelve
dolla week. You givee me tlen. I likee
stlay velly mulch-stlay you givee me
tlelve dolla."
There was solemn pause. I could
see my friends wrath rising, for he
slowly laid aside his paper and scruti-
nized our Celestial from cue to san.
dals.
"Confound it, Wing Songv' he cried
when you came. you said you would
do the laundry; but to give you less
work we cut that of, and now you want
more wages a. ,9s
"You makee tloo mulch laundly.
velly solly ! no suit. You no likee me.
glo."
''It seems to me-" ventured in pa
biflc tone, "that you ought to get along
very well ON el0. That's big wages,
Wing Song. considering it costs you
nothing to live"
II makee tlelve in laundly. You NO
ukee. ! glo. Velly solly."
Deep detection settled over him. His
eyes seemed to droop more at the COR
ners, the loose folds Of his coat to as
sume curves like those Of weeping viii
low. really felt that the idea Of leav-
ing our employ was distasteful to the
poor fellow and would have at once in
tervened in his behalf had he not turned
and with his hands clasped behind his
back left the room.
"RobinAan. cried. ''you are brute