The Norfolk Virginian. [volume] (Norfolk, Va.) 186?-189?, 1896-11-05


trrcm Current Litera,ure1
poor ltishmun offered an old sauce
ian Ter sale. Ills children gathered
a'oaAd HIN ANA inquired why he uarted
N.th H. An. mo honeys," hc answered,
would not II afthcr parting with it
ma .nr Ntuc money To buy sorncth:u,,
Ia pat IN l."
WON Hbon' nineteen years or ago, com
piH,u!nH of the dliltcu,i!cs 10 which his
early marriage subjected him said he
Wo".h never marry 50 Young again If he
lived to he ma old as Me,huscian
an inN'ld. after returning from u
Southern uir. said q At friend: oh
Shur" an i'a douc :0c II wurruld of
good i;on' away. I've como b%c:; another
man altogether. IN fact. I'm urit" mrselr
an Hecrnir.o lawyer once questioned II
client; SO EoiY Uncle. Dcunia D'tYahcr-
ty had no family" None al an. vour
mad weCutuudrC, or tn" io,lv and
mus conf nu'd: VERY good t,rd your
'"tn.r' 'l'iick o.f'!Ghertv, lid he have
chick or ,hni"'
IN an Irish provincial paper is the fo!-
lowing; notice: "Whciaas, i,a;i.c,, o'Cou-
nor lately left his lodgings. ~, is to ,.l,,c
notice that If lie does 70; rcturn immc-
d.'tciy and pay ior the same hr will t., adj
veriisud.'
f"o irishmen were WORKING IN Il quarry
wh,n one OF them fen into Il du,p Gull,y
hole. The other. alarmed. came 10 tho
maran OF the hole ANA cnilcd out.
"Arrah, rat, ar, " Ei!irl? If we're dead
srhkc.' Pat rcassu"ri Ii ~ from the bot
tom by saNing In answer: NO rim. I'm
not dead. but I'm spccchioss."
Ut II c-owdcd concert n young lady
standing atsthc door of the hail. was adj
dressed ~ nm horaat lI!bcrr,an who was
n attendance on thc ocCasi.n: ''Indadr
miss sat- he, e! should loo glad to give
you a satr. lut til" oirrtv ones arc all
fun"
PA. do You, uut,tstad Frcnch?'
Yes. If it's spoke in Ir.s.l?'
An Irish hosilcr wa. sent IL tho stable
10 bring forth a travellers horse. Nut
knowing which Of Tho iWl strange horse.
IN the stalls h,ic;.tasd Ia Tie traveller, and
w.srinE 10 avoid iho appearance OF ig-
hurancc ~ his business. il. saddied both
animals and brought them to the door.
Til" traveller pointed out h!sn horse.
saying: That's my na.," ,CrrinlnIy
yo"r honor, I know that, but ! didn't
Know which one of them was the other
GcntlcnIn'S"
\ domestic, newly engaged. presented
To his master one morning pair of boots.
the leg Of one OF which was much Longer
IMAM thn other How comes /; that thcys,
boots gre not of the same length"" 81
rally don't know. sir, but what bGthcrs
me the most Is thug the pair downstairs
~" II the Same AK"
IN lrishman, having feet of drfercn;
size. ordered the boots to be made no
c2iGinGi". Ills directions wone obcycd
"a, -a ne tried the smallest boot on h!r
iaTEsst loot. he exclaimed. petulant:y:
"to:.-drd that fellow. I crdrrcd him 10
nAF crr larger than the other. and. in
@teai of that. he has made one Smaller
than tao other"
INA! was Il tiiumphal appeal OF n:I
II sA lover of antiquity, who, in arguing
the superiority Of tho old architecture
0N@r the now, said: Where will you lima
any modern building Tint has lasted 80
lo:g as the aac!ent?"
An l;ish MAGISTRATE. censu;.in.. some
boys for lettering in the streets. argued:
III anybody were To stand in the street
how could anybody get by"
An iiiShmnn got out of his carriage "A,
q railway station for refreshments. but
the bell rang a:G Tho train left before he
could finish his rcpast ''Hould on" cried
'"'' nS hn ran Ike mailman after III,
car 'Hcu!d Cn,N g murthcr'n ouid s;ame
MIN, You've rot "A passenger on board
that's left behind"
lit Is very sickiy here" said one of the
sons of the Emerald Isle to another.
Yes" replied his companion. "a great
many have died this year that never died
before"
IN old Dublin woman went to the
chambers for Il tarthing candle, and was
~ ~ WIS Ihi7Vh 10 IL nali-penny on ac-
count OF the Russian war bad luck TO
Them. She exclaimed. "And do they fight
by candle light"
an irish lover remarks that 1t is a great
comfort 10 be alone, especially when yer
Hwateheart IS wild yc'
an eminent spirit merchant in Dublin
announced in one of the Irish papers Inn,
ne had still g small quantity of the
whiskcy ON sale which was drunk by his
late Majesty while in Dublin.
iiihernian gentleman told n friend
S'""!lnF Tor the pricsthood: II hone |
','"s nv 20 near You preach my funeral
mol another expressed the grateful
sentiment. May YOU live TO eat The
chicken that scratches over your graves
physician said oracularly of n mur
uered man: This person was so ill that
~ ne haa not been murdered lie would
nave died halls hour before"
Things in Safurni Ltio,n,y