davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
AYERS
Rather And Bike.

Linn Banks, assistant ticket agent at
the Union Depot, was cycling with
Cyrus Oldham, along the public high
way, two miles this side of Raytown,
Mo-, yesterday evening, when they
came across large rattIesnake in the
middle of the road. The reptile made
no effort toget out of the way of the
wheels, and Banks decided that he
would kill it by riding over its head.
But the moment the front wheel of the
bicycle struck the snake il coiled up
and begun striking at Banks. It's
fangs puctured the rubber tire and let
out the air. The men quickly dis
mounted and Banks killed the snake
with stone. He tied the rattler in a
handkerchief, brought it to the city
and placed it on exhibition in a glass
jar at the Union Depot.
The snake measures forty-two inches
and has three rattles and button on
the end of its tail, which indicates
that it was about four years old. Mr..
Banks is going to have the skin tanned
for belt. 1t has been many years
since rattlesnake was seen in the
vicinity of Raytown.
Two rattlesnakes always travel to-
gether, aud Mr.. Banks says he is going
out this evening for the mate of the
one he killed.-Kansas City Star.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
A DMINIsTRATOplUss ?'' he in
Tou bet L did"

\ fOu bet | did,
The gang made a grab for the rope.
"Up with him ~ they yelled, but the
leader waved them back.
"Why don't you let 'em go ahead ~
said the gentleman on the barrel to the
leader, angrily.
Whats the matter with you any
how:' asked the puzzled leader.
THAT'S all right Go on with your
rat killin', / tell you," insisted the
gentleman on the barrel.
'Not till / know more about this
snap, | reckon" responded the leader
"DO you wanter be strung up?''
"Course l do. Didn't / steal the
hOss ~
That's what you say, an it means
hangin'"
''Not if I'd got away it wouldn't, an
that's what / stole him fer. 1 wanted
to git out of yer derned country, an
seein' that you've stopped me an rve
got to stay, I'd heap sight ruther be
dead than alive. Pull away on that
rope there, you d" but he didn't
finish his remarks for obvious reasons.
New York Recorder.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
A SPIDER SAT A-sPINNING.

4 spider sat a-spinning,
,A-spinnIng one fine day.
a fly both young and foolish
Came iiuttering that way.
'That are you weaving there, ma'am,
So fine and very light?'
"a ball dress for my daughter
To wear tomorrow night.
"The glow-worm in the coppice
Has kindly lent her lamp
And the beetle his goloshes
To keep her from the damp.
She'll bind "a wreath of dewdrops
Upon her silken hair.
Excuse me, but you two, sir,
Would make lovely pair
Cried Flykin, quite excited:
"Ma'am. dancing's my delight.
I'd gladly give guinea
To go tomorrow night"
Then, sir. to find ticket
We certainly must try.
Come in and talk it over
Said the spider to the fly
\ spider sat a-spinning,
A-spinning in her lair,
Weaving silken tissue
With plump and pensive air.
Her visitor, poor fellow,
Was nowhere to be seen
And heard her gently murmur,
ale was distinctly green.'
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
A Judicial Tyrant.

The brutality of judges even in tie
present day is something appalling.
Yesterday member 81 the Chicago
bench while hearing case interrupt-
ed the proceedings long enough to re-
mark; "Oh, stop objecting, all you
gentlemen, and let's make some prog
ress with this ease.n II is hard to
think Of case Of greater inhumanity
than such command to lawyer
Chicago News.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
The Don's Delusions.

A Spanish paper thinks that in case
of war between Spain and this coun-
try the Southern States would secede
and join the Spaniards, and as a result
the union of States would smash itself
into minute particles. There are many
perils of this kind that are great COM
fort TO foreign powers that don't know
ANYTHING out.it.-Puck.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17

Dairying is becoming special busi-
ness. Formerly it was supposed that
any farmer could send good butter to
market, but it is now known that to
make the best butter requires skill and
attention to details, success being at
tanned only by those of experience in
handling the cows and their products
and with knowledge of the science
(for that Is what ii Isl Of dairying.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
JoHNsi JI,lsR;slhing a lit

+ ! you see, he proposed by lette1,
and his contention was that the ease
was of that peculiar character that
can not be properly presented by
briefs, but demands oral arguments.
The fact that the latter had been omit
ted, he held, should be held an error,
and the point was such a novel one
that | consented to let him argue it.
Then his argument was so forceful
that | granted his petition, and con-
sented to hear the whole case again.
Do you think"
II think, said the Judge, "that the
court favors the plaintiff Chicago
Post.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
Thoughtful Girl.

After they had departed she wept
bitterly. Suddenly she ceased.
1t had occurred to her that perhaps
her tears might fail on her new silk
shirt waist and spot it irrevocably.-
Cincinnati Enquirer.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
,ersans na.--I declared
Taxing no Chan oc;,,;on ,

Somehow she felt that he ,,e,ef;ceuc
with his mind made up to rby Rev.
She was rs certain of it as she wolf
have been if he had told her, and 2.
sequently she amused herself by teS-
ing him for half an hour before she let
him have chance To come to the
point.
And then he balked.
She couldn't understand it. She
knew that he was on the verge of
asking her to be his wife, but he didn't
put the question. He becam suddenly
very ill at ease and nervous and sheer
ed off every time they got anywhere
near the subject that was uppermOst in
the mind of each.
She looked at him soulfully, and he
returned the look, but that was as far
as he went. She sighed, but he didn't
put his hopes and wishes into words.
She became pensive and romantic and
talked of the loneliness of a woman or
Gun "hO hsto ho StiOhS a' " AS"i UP
on as she went through life, bat it did
not bring an avowal from his lips.
She feared then that she had played
with him too long, and had, possibly,
lost him, but at last he spoke.
"Shall we go out on the porch ?" he
asked.
She knew, although he did not, that
there were Others on the porch, and
she pleaded that she was afraid of the
night air.
He looked around the room anxious
ly, but seemed to find nothing that gave
him any hope. He seemed TO be des-
pondent, but in measure determined.
"Mabel," he said at last, speaking
very softly.
"Yes,n she returned, endeavoring
not to show her agitation.
"rhere is something | wish very
much say to YOU"
She looked down at the toes of her
boots and said nothing.
He came over to her and took her
hand.
'Mabel," he said earnestly, "If you
will take that blamed parrot out of the
room, I'll tell you what it is"
Then she understood why he had
been so nervous, and the parrot was
put where he could not overhear and
repeat what might be said.-Chicago
Post.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17

NEW SPRING GOODS. New
est styles in all kinds of
goods and lowest prices. A full
line of Cashmere and Scrges in all
qualities. Splendid assortment of
Black Wool, Worsted and Mohair
Dress in Brocaded and Novelty.
Styles, suited for dresses and skirts
A big stock of newest styles of
Novelty Dress Goods, ranging in
price from II l-2 cts to 81 yard.
GREAT variety of Silks and
" Silk and Wool Plaids, &C., for
waists & dresses. Wash Goods for
desses and waists, including Swisses,
Lawns, Percales, Dimities, Crepes,
Moire, Chintzes, Cheviotte Prints,
Ginghams, Seersuckers, DC. Splend-
id values in Table Linens, Towels,
Napkins, Table Covers, Bed
Spreads, Portiers, Furniture Da-
mask Silk and Silkolinc Draperies
and Cushions.
4 AIDES Dress Skirts and Shirt
IL Waists. Ladies Spring Capes
in Velvet, Silk and Cloth. Ladies
Night Dresses, Corset Covers, Skirts
and Chemise. A handsome assort-
ment of New Lace Collars and
Dress Yokes. Infants Long and
Short Dresses, Long and md Shot l:ss
Goats and Sacks. Great variety Of
Children's Null and Lace Caps and
Hats.
NEW Style Buttons, Silks, ,Gimps,
Y Ribbons, Laces, &c, for dress
trimmings. A large variety OF
Cambria, swiss and Nansook En-
broidery in white and colOrs.
Linen Sheeting, Stamped Linen and
Embroidery Ska large assort-
ment of Lace Curtains cheap.
Also Curtain Swiss and Scrim.
II ARGEST stock Of new Millin-
H cry Goods. All the latest
styles. A large assortment of Lace
and Button Guaranteed Kid Gloves.
Fast CoIored Stockings in Black
and colors for Ladies, Misses ,
Children, Men and Boys. Best
dark, blue and light calicoes, . cts.
Wool and Cotton Carpet Chain.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17

1t was almost midnight, and had
just left the opera house, when hand
was roughly placed on my shoulder
and a rough voice said /:
ave want you"
/ turned and found myself face to
face with a couple of detectives.
"You want me right bad, eh?" l
asked.
ave do"
al thought so, as there are two of
you,' L replied. "What am charged
with?"
Murder ~
"Oh," calculated. Il fancied it was
for skipping a board biIlo or some other
horrible crime of the kind. Well, l
am not the man you want
"Now, do you know that We are
pretty sure that you arr. Is you last
name Griffith ?"
at isl
"And isn't your Christian name
Griffith ~
"My front name, do you mean ?
Yes-both sections are alike. You
have letter of introduction, I sup
pose?'
The warrant was produced, and L
read it under the gaslight. Horror of
horrors Five victims were enumer-
ated.
81 wasn't aware that had murder
ed the whole family" / said. Il must
have used bomb. The description of
me is drawn pretty fine, with the ex-
ception of the tattoo m ,rks.'
you'll own up to them, too, no
doubt
"Swodowe." erowled ape of the de-
tectives.
That was queer lingo, deeply gut
tural. | wrestled with it for half a
minute, and translated it without a
diagram. BY that time | was walk
ing toward the station house between
my captors. When ushered into the
brightly-lighted room | said f:
Gentlemen, you think | have been
chatting, but haven't. The matter is
too seriously funny, or too humorously
serious-I don't know which. / never
killed anybody or anything-not even
a gallinipper. to my recollection, much
less whole family of bipeds.'
took off my coat and rolled up my
shirt sleeves.
"Where's the anchor ?'' / asked.
They looked sharply at my arms,
then at me, and then at each other.
"Send for forty-power microscope, "
/ said. Maybe you can see it then.
Take me around to the residence of Mr..
B, President of the Bank.
He'll vouch for me-
''He's sick in bed"
swell, there's Judge W"
"He's in Toronto
/ became desperate. l was afraid
that if / named another prominent
citizen they would probably say that
he was in Hades. Just then the night
editor of the. Daily Morning came
into the station.
"Do you know this man?'' I asked.
"Joe Darringer? Who doesn't, We
would like to know ?''
''He'll vouch for me-" said.
''If he does, you go scot free"
Certify, what does this mean ?" jol-
ly, big-hearted Joe Darringer asked.
/ explained and then he opened the
escape valve of his Indignation.
you're pair of chumps," he snarl-
ed. "Go hold yolr heads under the
fire plug"
The detectives walked off with dis
comfited look, but first apologized, not
out of regard for me, perhaps, but for
fear that Joe would roast them in the
morning edition.
Gritty rose TO his feet, whereupon we
began to fire qestions at him.
"Was the real murderer arrested ?''
"Yes."
''Convicted ?"
"Yes."
''Hung?"
"Yes.n
Certify, that's all true, is it ?''
"Eyery word of it,"
He flung away the stump of his cigar,
| and ad.iad % IL ON oath.
"And Pm the Griffith Griffith who
was hung
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17

Hundreds of precious little ones owe
their lives to DIR. Thomas Electric Oil,
the sovereign cure for Group and all
other throat or lung diseases.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
The Goat Was Hungry.

Several days ago the employees Of a
local express office were furnished con-
siderable amusement and all at the ex-
pense of an innocent goat and an aged
darky. Sampson some time ago
tpromised a Shepherdsville friend a
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
A Bold Bluff

The gentleman who had stolen the
horse in Texas had inadvertently trot-
ed into a gang of toughs, one of whom
owned the horse, and fourteen minutes
ater he was standing on a barrel at the
ioOt of telegraph pole with a rope
a direct connection between
ais neck and one of the erosstrees on
-ble.
Estate orti the leader of the gang,
te,,ers of alything to say why
granted by the proper is-2fi
signed notice is hereby Civ ,
Indebted 10 said estate To n&.-the un-
payment, and those having claims
said estate will present them, duly auth
Gated for settlement, on or before SttuF
July II, iS-i. at late residence OF dec q.
4 l. Pueb GEORGE f.. RAIMAN,
ATTY: JOHN Z. RAlMANI
Adm's of Cyrus Rayman, uec
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
THE KELLEY CURE

Is special boon to business men Who having
drifted unconsciously into the drink habit and
awaken to find the disease Of alcoholism fastened
upon them, rendering them unfit TO manage 6f-
fairs requiring a clear BRAIN A four weeks
cniIrSe Of freafment Rt the
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
lVoRYSoAP
IT FLOATS

At all of Ivory sold; that
five cake and
economical laundry general household
Grocer is of it insist his getting
Ta Pso1sR6 & esxHIc cs1L
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
ELYS
CREAM BALM

Is quickly absorb
ed. Cleanses tn
Nasal Passages, Ale
ays Pain and In
fiammation, Heals
the Sores. Protects
Restorethsc Senses
the Membrane from
Additional Cold
of Taste an I Smell.
Gives Relief AT once
nd il will cure.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17
PrTTsBURo KELLEY INSTITUTE.

No. 1916 Fifth Avenue,
restores 70 them all their powers, mental and
physical, destroys the abnormal appetite, and
restores them to the condition they were IN be
fore they indulged in stimulants. This has been
done n more than 1900 cases treated here, and
among them some of your own neighbors, TO
whom we can refer with confidence as to the
absolute safety and efficiency of the Kelley Cure.
The fullest and most searching investigation II
n vited. Send for pamphlet giving fun informa-
ton. O.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17

A particle isapplied directly into the nostriis
and is agreeable. Price 30 cents at Druggists
or by mail.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1896-06-17

IMPORTANT TO ADVERTISERS.
The cream of the country papers Is found
IN Remington's County Seat Lists Shrewd
advertisers avail themselves of these lists,
copy of which can be had Of Remington
Bros. Of New York & Pittsbur2.
The Forrest City times., 1896-03-06
SCHOOL AND CHURCH,


buddhism of late is gaining quite
number of adherents among the intel
lectual leaders in Germany, such as
George Ebers, Gabriel Max. julius
Stinde, L. Hartman, and they have just
begun to issue a monthly at Brunswick
under the title of Sphinx.
Baron Achille Paganini the only
son OF the great violinist, who died re-
Gently at Parma, was himself good
amateur musician. BY special appeal
to Plus TX. he obtained permission
to have his father, who died without
the sacrements. buried in consecrated
ground.
benjamin ID. Silliman, of Brooklyn,
becomes the oldest living Yale gradu.
ate by the death of Charles L. Powell,
of Alexandria, Va. Mr. Powell was
born in 1904, and was graduated from
Yale IN the class of 1923. For several
years his name has appeared first in
the list of living Yale graduates.
-Ramkriskna Gopal Bhandharkar,
professor of Sanskrit at Poona, has
been elected foreign correspondent of
the Academic des Inscriptions, being
the first native of India to receive the
distinction. The other new corre-
spondents are Kirchoff the classical
scholar of Berlin, and Benndorf, of vi
emma, the archaeologist.
Sir Frederick Pollock, whom Har-
ward honored with an LII. d. last COM
mencement, has not forgotten the dis
tinction, and there is much praise OF
American Jurists and American charac-
ter in general in the article on the
Harvard law school which he contrib
uted to the London Times.
The board of visitors of the Uni
versity of Wisconsin has just investi-
gated charge that President Charles
X. Adams is "a born and bred aristo-
crat," and has decided that the charge
is unfounded, on the ground that the
president was born on a farm, and
worked his way through school and col
lege.
Evangelist Smith, who is conduct
ing series of successful revival meet
ings at the Peoples temple. Boston, is
a full-blooded gypsy, and was brought
up in New Forest, England He is de-
scribed as most picturesque, forcibIe
and eloquent preacher, although at the
time of his conversion he could not
read.
The Forrest City times., 1896-03-06
ALWAYS A SOMETHING.

ihere is always something, whatever
your lot,
And OH how that something annovs,
A"ough tne merest of specks 1t becomes a
big blot,
"A pang at the heart of your Joys.
"hat matters the manifold blessings
you've got,
,r, III there's one little cloud In the blue?
lot, '''
And if It's not one thing-it's two!
II 1t wasn't for something left in or left
out,
-, Our happiness would be complete:
lis the lack of one room that we worry
about,
Ut the dwelling is on the wrong street,
III we only were thin, IL we only were stout.
II we had something different to do.
ihere is always something left in or left
out,
And If It's not one thing-it's two,
There is always a something as certain as
fate,
A fly in the ointment we meet:
Inc rich and the poor and the lowly and
great
Find bitter mixed in with the sweet.
For each has an II with his neiehbors To
make;
And 1t follows this changing life through:
ihere Is always something as certain as
fate,
And If it's not one thing-it's two!
-Hunter MacCulloch. in Good Housekeep-
ing
The Forrest City times., 1896-03-06
THE LOVE OF JEWELRY.
The Wearing of Ornaments Is Often
Called Vulgar.

The Wearing of Ornaments Is Often
Called Vulgar.
The rise Of the sentiment of equality
has debarred gentlemen in western
Europe from general use of ornament
and has induced them even to declare
the wearing of jeweIry by men vulgar
pretension; but whenever they dare,
that is, whenever usage justifies the
practice-ssy, when wearing orders or
at fancy dress ball-they exult In
their bedizenment rs much as ever.
Make it etiquette for an officer to be-
jewel his sword hilt and see.
We venture to say that, IL opinion
allow ed it, the gentlemen of to-day
would initiate Count Esterhazy, and
would be visible at every crossing at
Bond stree, or on the boulevards, from
the flashes of their jewelry, hundreds
of yards away. Kings are so visible,
on every state occasion. and kings
wives, who wear what their lords wish
worn. Indeed, subdued as the jewelry
men have now become, they are still,
even as regards their own apparel, m
portant buyers.
Birmingham would be half paralyzed,
and the great jewel distributors would
feel poorer ii men gave up wearing
watch chelns, gold backs to their
watches, gold studs, gold sleeye-links
and gold Tings-the latter three times
as massive as those worn by the other
sex. Besides, though the women wear
the jewels, it is the men who pay for
them. and. though they pay in part
from readiness to please their wives OF
fiances, it also pleases themselves
through the indulgence of the eye
London Spectator.
The Forrest City times., 1896-03-06
Justifiable Resentment.

He was a sedately dressed man, whose
countenance was thoughtful and whose
literary taste, as shown by the books
which he carried with him to read on
the train, indicated that he was a man
of learned attainmens. Even the brake
man was moved to assume respectful
manner. AS he leaned over him to open
the window he said:
Excuse me, professor"
The old gentleman was on his feet in
an instant, his eyes flashing angrily.
Needn't git mad" the brakeman
said. I've got ter ten ter me busi-
ness"
II don't care how much you attend
10 your business, but don't you ever call
me anything but mister Don't dare
call me professor. am neither dane
Ing master, a prize fighter nor a juggler.
and / have therefore no right to the
title!"-Washington Star.
The Forrest City times., 1896-03-06
A COLD WAVE.


AT two o'clock in the afternoon the
thermometer registered 81 degrees of
heat in the shadow of our little veran-
dah, where Gene sat tanning herself
after putting away lunch.
Mat, / am glad mother didn't come
down to Florida this winter" she said
TO me through the open window 81
don't believe such hot weather as this,
IN February, would agree with her,
after spending 81 winters in Yer
mont"
But it will be necessary for her to
come some time if we stay" replied:
land since father left his property in
vested here, we are obliged to stay,
even if we do not like it,"
"Oh, well, [ do like it, suppose"
said Gene, redectively. But | should
like to see just one good old snow-drift
and hear sleigh bells jingle once this
winter"
"Oh, you arc a born ncrtherner,
Gene. But for one, | am glad poor
father had the resolution to leave that
rocky old Vermont farm" said I.
''Ah, but think Of the maple sirup we
would make up there this springl"
cried Gene.
''But think of the 'cukes,' tomatoes,
oranges and pineappics we shall have
here" l exclaimed, mot To mention
Strawberries, cggplants, stringbeans,
green peas, mangoes, new potatoes,
beets and corn! Thirty acres of them,
worth $4,000! More than we coull
grub from that old Vermont farm with
ten years Of hal d work.
Whats that about ten years of hard
work p said Ruel, coming around
the corner with a phosphate bucket
on his arm, bringing a ghastly odor of
Il with him. "Yes, itIs hard work seed
ing and wedding such weather as this.
My, but .sn't it hot, thought" he
groaned, throwing himself on the floor
of the veranda.
II cannot work halt an hour without
feling weariet,," he went on. Il sup
pose it's those Vermont Writer thaw
irg out of my blood. But it is grea:
weather to make things grow! l can
see those long rows of string-beans
breaking groundl Fact, girls! Tn"
ground over those bean-heads is hop
ping all along the rows, like little
toads.
"But talk of work." Ruel continued
within three weeks. When il comes to
picking and shipping, you girls will
have to pack the tomatoes, cucumbers
and eggpplants. Won't your fingers
have to ny? But there's money in it.
1t looks as though We could get rich
here in ten years"
But Gene wants maple-sirup," said
I, mischievously.
"Oh, WE'LL" exclaimed Ruel, 1--WE can
send up 10 Vermont for couple OF
gallons-if she must have some"
Florida was a new country to all
three of us, for although my father had
bought a hundred acres here, and had
the cottage built and orange-groves
planted seven or eight years before,
we young people had not gone south
with him, and had now been there but
ten weeks. Busy weeks they had been,
seeding, "fertilizing" and preparing
our first crop of garden vegetables for
shipment north.
Our orange and grapefruit trees were
not yet bearing, and, in fact, had been
nipped hard by the December frost the
week before we came; but the weather
had been so warm after our arrival that
we found it difficult to believe that a
really coil night was possible in Flor
ida
The Forrest City times., 1896-03-06
In the finny tribe there is n

In the finny tribe there is no CON-
munication between the nasal cavities
and the mouth. Fish do not use their
noses in breathing, but breathe
through their gills, SO no communica-
tion is necessary.
The Forrest City times., 1896-03-06

What can be more foolish than to
think that all this rare fabric of heaven
and earth could come by chance, when
all the skill of art is not able to make
an oyster er?-Jeremy Taylor.