The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1896-12-17
MARRIED LEE OF TO-DAY.
Foreign Customs Discussed, and
Some ofthc Difficulties OF Modern
Marriage.

some Of the D1mcultles u MOOeru
Marriage.
From the Philadelphia Times.
The future marriage question which Is
being discussed so promiscuously In cur
rent literature, not only serves as target
for the tiresome "new woman jokes, but
is receiving the serious consideration OF
thinking minds. The French marriage OF
today has been severely criticised on this
side of the Atlantic, especially In Its DOW.
ry feature. The selection of the husband
BY the parents of the wife meets with OBJ
lection also. but there is something to he
said in favor of 1t. French parents gen.
orally, having the welfare of their daugh-
ter at heart which is only natural. 90 NOT
think of imposing on her husband Tor
whom she has not a Dredilection. girl
Of lS in France having very limited ex-
perience Of life. Is apt to be deceived IN
her estimate Of men. and her parents. win
| that knowledge of the world which time
alone can give. guide her In her selection.
BESIDES. there are other considerations.
The family ties are stronger than with us
and the daughter can no more entertain
the thought OF entirely separating herself
from father and mother than they can of
separating themselves from her. The
husband from this reason becomes as
much a member of the family as If he
were a son.. This causes them to exercise
prudence. lest he who proposes to enter
the family may disturb its harmony. Sur.
rounded by such restraints, such social
calamity az an elopement with the COACH
man Is rare. One OF the most objection
able features OF the French marriage Is
that II is hurried on too early In the life
OF the woman. French law legalizes the
| contract ut the age Of Is, and as soon as
the daughter has attained this age the
mother never rests until she has secured q
husband for her. often twice and even
thrice the age Of the wife, Thus the girl
wife rather accepts than chooses, and
there is usually no spontaneity In the ac-
tion.
There Is an idea In France that ar un-
| married woman Of 25 Is an old maid, and
from this principally arises the haste Of
| the parents. and their way of treating the
daughters as basket Of eggs that must
they should lose their freshness and be
no longer marketable. The mothers zeal
also gives rise to suspicion that she wishes
| to relieve herself of the responsibility Of
| guarding her daughter, which II not flat
tering to the latters strength Of charac-
| ter. After she Is married she enjoys a
freedom that few American women would
think Of claiming. The sudden transition
to the open air. cannot be healthful to
married life, and 1t Is an injustice to the
young wife to send her forth without
those arms necessary to woman,s pro.
tection-experience Of the world and
knowledge Of human nature. The absence
Of these naturally exposes her to perils.
Then the tepid love so often found In the
| household. and arising from the preva-
| lent dowry system, contributes thereto.
and this state Of things bears natural fruit
| in that disobedience Of the marriage vows
with which the French women are so often
charged by the English and Americans.
Yet 1t Is but fair to add that the expan-
sive, lively nature of the French woman,
provokes suspicion in the Anglo Saxon
mind when there 10 no ground for 1t.
II II u
In the United States marriages are said
to be more numerous In proportion to the
population than in any. other country
with the exception Of 1reland-which Is an
indication Of fair morality. As rule.
poor people marry in all countries regard
less Of the considerations which often re-
strain those who are In easy circumstances.
AS the man get more light difficulties rise
| before him, and marriage assumes the pro-
portions Of q great question. In agricul-
tural districts there Is general marrying
in all classes. for there Is more simplicity
Of life, which always tends to numerous
marriages. Throughout the country the
morality and contentment Of the married
life attract the people of the middle class
and those who adhere to the principles
of Christianity. whether rich or poor.
These comprise the body of the nation.
The falling off In marriages Is found In
| the centers Of population, where the needs
of life press hard. The old.fashioned dis
| interestedness has Of late years been los
atoms ago It was plain sailing; all were
interested In some sort OF work. and none
| were rich az compared with those OF to-
day. 1t has become evident that in cities
| Hymen IL losing his power; yet the god
dess who came out Of the sea-foam con-
| tinues to exercise her wonted charms over
men. though they refuse to follow Hymen.
| There has been hide-ard-seek process on
| - - xls.<- 49,,
woman, which would be to the last de-
gree ungenerous, If 1t were not in some
! measure compulsory. Fathers endeavor
| to dispose Of their daughters to those who
stand upon conditions, as though each
| were trying to shirk the expense of keep
ing them. Thus regarded the woman be-
| comes a possible encumbrance to a mar
rying man, and almost a parasite In her
own family. Looking at the matter in
pressed 1t Is not surprising that the In
| telligent women OF today have taken the
stand that they have in claiming equal ed
ucaion and opportunities with their
| in the world. instead Of looking upon mar
riage of some sort as the only possible
| means of support.
| A great number Of those who live In
luxury In the metropolis make both ends
meet with difficulty. The head Of the fam
| lily is stretched on financial wheel. which
never ceases to turn every day In the
| year. He Is often pressed for what he con.
siders the necessaries Of life. though he
may spend thousands Of dollars year.
! The capital Of the man who spends ten
| thousand dollars year at legal interest
would not perhaps yield him third nf
what he expends. and though he may be
considered rich man. he is obliged to
work hard for his living and without re-
| Taxation. He Is not In a position to help
any one but himself, however willing he
may be to do So The young man making
| his way through an ocean OF difficulties,
and often carrying heavy ballast in the
| shape Of clubs and social dissipation may
love the daughter of this poor rich father,
but he has not the audacity, even IL she
were willing to make the sacrifice, to take
her out OF her handsome nest into an in
feror one. In resisting the matrimonial
| temptation he has something to say for
himself. His knowledge Of life tells him
that there are scarcely any hours Of hap
pness that are compensation for the rasp.
| Ing, wearing. daily want of means to pro-
vide for everyday necessities and COM
forts. and that 1t IS not long before do
nestle peace gives way before this terrible
pressure. 1t Is human, too. for the wife
In unguarded moments to make compar RI
sons between her married and single life.
IN which regrets and reproaches are inn
piled II not spoken. When matters reach
this point It is the coup de grace, and do.
mestic felicity is at an end.
An adviser may say to this young man,
| II he wants to marry the rich girl, Go
| West" in order to secure the necessary
competency, but this counsel cannot often
be followed, even II 1t were wise. His lot
Is cast here. and through industry he has
reasonable expectations Of ultimately ac.
quiring modest competency. It would
be foolish for him to give up the bird in
hand for the two out West In the bush,
to. say nothing Of his likings. which in
all probability favor his present surround.
ings. His field Of labor IL already indi-
Gated, and he Ii already In the harness.
his furture being here he must submit to
accept civilization as he finds It, Thus
reasoning he turns away from the poor
rich mans sumptuous dwelling with a
| sigh; he may not pluck the coveted flower