New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-12-30
School District &c.

Hoffman Mic 3 sIsigel Creamery Co
James VIM 8 69I 6 81
Kral John 8 q,
Washington Post senator Cushman
r Davis Of Minnesota tells q good story
winch be credits to Alexander Dumas.
According to Dumas. there was once q
time when all the nations Of the earth
were summoned before the great ruler
OF human destinies. Each was to express
9 wish which was to be granted for all
time. England expressed a desire for
the greatest navy in the world. and this
was granted. france wanted to have the
most powerful army, and this was grant
ed, and SO on, until all the nations had
obtained their wishes-all except Spain,
which did not put in an appearance un-
til the rest were about ready to depart
But although Spain had beer slow in
coming, it was not at all backward in
asking. The first wish expressed was for
the most beautiful women This was
granted. Then the finest fruits We're
sought, and then the most equable eli
mate. No other nations having asked
for these, both requests were complied
with. Still Spain was not satisfied, and
asked again for the best government in
the world. .4'You have asked for the best
thing last. Having been granted three
Wishes" said the giver o: all good gifts,
"you need expect nothing more"
"And So" continued Dumas, 'sSpain
has never had decent government from
that day to this and never Will have"
New York Journal: :sDid you ever"
queried the man with the red cravat,
'.dine in one of those restaurants where
they give you meal and band concert
for rs cents?''
~ never did," replied the man with
the asbestos shirt, "but I have -dined in
restaurants where did not get either a
square meal or band concert for ST.
es:Well," resumed the man with the
necktie, laden with disgust, "this expert
ence had was new"
II went into the restaurant about five
o'clock in the afternoon. There We're no
other victims in the place. A waiter,
who wore an apron. that put me in mind
of a table cloth after a hard days work
at a chowder party, dexterously attemp-
ted to knock out my eye with napkin.
The band was just tuning up. I fancied
the leader was gazing at me with an eS-
preston of interest. Anyhow, ordered
soup, and all the time was putting it
away the band played Swim Out,
o'Grady-'
81 tackled a piece of chicken. and the
band switched to when You and II
Were Young 1 started in to carve a
piece of alleged roast beef, ard the band
played, Hes an Elephant on His Hands.
After got through with an assault on
the roast beef I took a bite out OF
pickle / thought would fool him the
next attempt, and made a sudden jab at
a piece Of pie. 1t never phased him. He
came right back at me with The Side
walks of New York. and I had to admit
as unbent my teeth that he knew the
crust. gulped down a drink Of water,
and the leader detected some evidence
of my unfamiliarity with the beverage
for the band played 'Arrah Go On,
You're Only Foolin'.' started to leave
before there was chance of losing my
mind. AS I did so, the band, with a note
Of exultatlon in the tones of all instru-
ments, spelled sJust Tell Them That You
Saw Me- You are the first man I have
told.'' .S.@ @.. Ill., @
The man with the asbestos shirt was
lost in thought for two minutes. Then
he said: zE
..Charles, I believe you're smoking at
a cheap place e.
Major c. T. Picton is manager Of the
State Hotel, at Denison, Texas, which the
travelling men say is one of the best ho-
tells in that section. In speaking of
Chamberlain Collie, Cholera and D iarr-
.hoea Remedy Major Picton says: 81
have used it myself and in my family for