The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-09-30

he WANTS A SCIENTIFIC CLUE
ORGANIZED.

He Claims That In the Tnn Of Comet
There are Millions Of Microbes an
That It is the Duty of scieatific Clubs Q
Fully Investigate and Let the PeePs
Know How They Can Escape the Terri
BILE Scourxe-CIub VIII Meet Tonirh
and Throw Light on the Subject-Do
/ Kelley Talks.
Doc Kelley Is organizing scientifi
club 10 meet at the African Methods
| church each Wednesday.
Doc was met by an Eagle reporter yes
terday and gave an outline Of the objec
OF the association in the following Ian
guage
You see that the eastern paper
what are sent 10 me from somebody.
don't know who. ara full OF the Line
club. No. 1 don't know shucks abou
the Lime club, but 1 do know from
| what my wife read me, thai the Eel
lows thar fail to answer the regulation:
propounded-
Now, Saturday night they asked tht
class about the effect OF the comet or
the human family. Now, / has don'
been engaged in moving baggage. but
confess 10 You that my cheek burned
with indignation when / read the ans
wer given in the Free Press
Il tell you that the Free Press Is a
mighty queer paper. IL claims TO b:
Democratic, but it throws mud all ovel
the platform and tine candidate II
puts me in mind of Aunt Matilds down
in North Carolina She was stuck or
Uncle Timothy, but when the time
would come she would defer the az.
engagements to a more suitable time
1t used TO make us slaves mighty hot
when Aunt Matilde would defer hei
marriage
You see Aunt Matilda was our nurse
and she was terrible cross and US kids
used 10 think it was because she had
never enjoyed the embrace of a full
sized masculine. The time was arrang-
ed for Uncle Timothy and Aunt Matilda
TO join jIbbents. but the female portion
Of the contract would fly the track
every time. / often wondered what was
the ma rrer with Aunt Matilda, but one
day when Aunt Matilda went over to
the swamp and found Uncle Timothy
as full as a billed owl and making love
TO Aunt Nancy, one Of the yaIierest mig
gers in North Carolina, my mind was
fully made up.
81 knowed that Aunt Matilda was led
by the hand Of Providence and respect
ed her from that time ON. She used 10
tell US that the moon. stars and sun
We're inhabited by genuine colored peo-
pie and that the boss had no white
blood flowing through his veins He
was as black as Sam Williams and we
used to set out and study the planets by
the hour.
IT tell you there is no time when q
man can come so NEAR nature as when
he has nothing ON but a tow shirt. The
little winches and me used to sit by the
hour and study the stars and II has be-
come a fixed purpose with me. / have
a yellow bob-tailed dog, and he howls
like the devil some nights and know
there is something in the howl.
Now, / has done got the Intelligent
colored pursons to agree to meet me at
the Methodist church tomorrow night,
and we have agreed to take up these
scientific subjects end discuss them for
the benefit of the human family.
I'VE win admit reporter for the
Eagle. because we ,cognize that he Is
one of us, and the rst subject viii be
the effect OF the JHhets ON the human
family.
Il wish that horse would stand still
till tell you something what am press
ing mighty heavy on the hat band of
this child Hold up thar you darn fool.
you feel your oats, and can't compre-
bend what 1 am telling the Eagle re-
porter. (And with This Doc got down
and gave his mare three hard ldcks)
Il was speaking about the comets
and 1t makes me blush when 1 see the
students of the High school and Pro-.
Dyer spinning along the streets eating
bananas when they fail TO inform the
public OF the great hanger they are In.
Did you ever nytice the may light
which the comets fhrows?" asked Doc,
looking at the reporter as he gave his
horse another JERK.
The reporter acknowledged that he
had
We'll, every one or those specks what
you see are a regiment of microbes. You
knows what micrpb IS? Wei they are
surpents what am done gone and bred
consumption, bowel complaint, mysteries
epeietios. toothache and 50 on. You see
a man with the bellyache and ne has
ten nicrobs; headaShe, they have seven:
diptheria, they have 1hirty-seven, and
50 IL goes on through the entire cata-
loglFe-
Now, i have an idea and that 's
that If the coloVed people VIII only
stop shooting craps and git right down
TO business they can do much good TO
the poor white trash as well as 70 the
colored people.
rfA+ra
nifyfng glass from school She had
bought II on the way to school, and /
looked at "A drop OF vinegar, and on, my
God, what an aspect / did see. I tell
you there was thousands OF animals
who displayed as much authority as
Mayor Cox.
81 tel you Sink there Is r1ias-na In
the hazy light tina. you Gee following a
comet Old mamma used to put onions
on the stove and she said the stinch
would drive away the rntasrna and
none OF US kids had the whoopine
cough. although II was In the neighbor-
hood.
Now. there e p,enty Of comets in
the air and Consequently lots Of miasma,
and think that rfe scientific club could
unrayel lots OF mystery. I have lots Of
scientific questions 70 bring before the
club and / want you 90 come % the
"Wednesday night and you VIII
find that he colorsn people have lots n
their head bessdsA nits."
Arthur Carpente' and wife are IN the
city visiting their scope 81. Carpen-
te- has left Chicsgo and - going TO
LfadV1lle where be VIII embark Ia |
The hotel business having become IN |
terested IN the Hofei yendocne OF thas |