Evening star., 1896-12-05
A KENTUCKY DEVICE.
Genius Which He Used to Ba
Purpose.

Genius Which He Used to bad
Purpose.
Somebody had told the story of the man
with sponge in a jug who tried to work
the racket on saloon keeper and didn't,
when n man from Kentucky. who hadn't
said ten words in the last fourteen min
utes, held up a corkscrew and shook it at
the presiding officer of the Warm-Corner-
in -the-Hotel-Ofiice Club for recognition
'The gentleman from sCorksville, said
the president, has the bottie.-I beg your
pardon, I mean the floor, and the meeting
will be glad to join him in--excuse me, l
mean to hear what he has to say
Thus handicapped the Kentucky man
proceeded
As l was about TO remark" he said
when the president tried to choke me
off. l never hear that sponge story that l
am not reminded of a much better one
the scene of which was In my state long
ere republican majorites and outside cap
ital had conjoined in making 1t too indus
trious for the true delights of living There
was at the time living on the classic BANKS
OF the raging Bullskin. in Shelby, an cid
fellow who owned a small distillery. In his
nelghborhood were a dozen or SO yong
fellows who were ready for any mischief
and who We're general roysterers to the dis
credlt or the good people Of that COM
mCnity.
These young men could not get a drop
or the old mans whisky without the
money, and they were afraid to monkey
with him, for he had a way of training a
shotgun around the premises that was
neither agreeable nor safe.
one Day the gang were down in the barn
OF one OF them playing cards, and they
thought they were in need of liquor, and
none was to be had except from the dis
tllery. They had q f1ve-gallon keg hid en-
the premises which had just been emptied,
and 1t was proposed to get it replenished.
RIrt fpn
tllery, and get it loaded, was voted down
P1 1omptly, as there was no money in the
croWd-the game being carried on with
l. .. US, worse than valueless in the esti-
mailon or the d1st1ller-and 1t was utterly
useless to ask credit for even one gallon
Then one chap, who was stupid at cards.
SAID he would undertake to get the LIQUOR
ana ne was hooted at. But he persisted,
ara at last they hooked a horse to sled
ard started him away with the keg At
the first springs he came to he put two GAL
longs OF water IN the keg and hurried along
to the distillery."
There he told the distillery man that
he had two gallons in the keg and wanted
the balance put in, as some men wanted
1t down the creek, where big party was
fishing. Maybe that wasn't lust the ex-
cuse, but he told him some kind of lie
and got the three gallons into the lug
Then he began palaverng around and tell
ing the Old man that he would come next
day and pay, but the old fellow got mad
IN a minute, ana, after cussing his Gus
toner all around the shop. he poured the
three gallons back into the barrel, and fired
the young man with the keg. But he did
not go back to the crowd with two gallons
Of water. Not much. 1t had mixed with
the liquor and, while it wasn't as. strong
as aqua fortis, it was two-thirds whisky,
and 1t didn't cost a cent. Neither did It
cost the distiller anything, for he poured
the three gallons into a barrel and no Gus
toner of his ever knew that there was
more water to the barrel than the distiller
was wont to put in