Eagle River Democrat. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1893-1896, 1896-07-27
A Girrs Familiar Friend.

You can never be too careful in the
condolences which you make about your
home life to your familiar friend. You
may love her., she may love you, but
after all there is no tie so strong as that
of blood, and the day will come when
you will regret having moderated any
one of your own kin. | like a girl to
have a girl friend and I<think it good
for her to share her pleasures, her In
terestS in books or pictures, even her
opinion of a bonnet with this friend, but
/ would advise her to remember to forget
the unpleasant happenings in her own
home, and not even to whisper them to
her close companion, who, while she may
love her, may not be able to control her
tongue, and so the stories will be re-
peated-theSe stories about family life
and some day they will come back
dressed so that you will scarcely recOg-
nize the. Enjoy your friend, but have
it understood between you that home af-
fairs are not to be discussed, and that
each of you is to try to get the better of
the somewhat morbid sensitiveness
which is too often part Of the character
of the American girl. She is apt to
think that nobody at home appreciates
her, and she is only too apt to repeat
this opinion until the world at large be-
lieves that she is treated in the most
unkind manner. Very often in home life
no hurt is meant, but it is only that
where there are so many the peculiari-
ties of one are apt to be overlooked
Make up your mind in the very begin
ming of your friendship that, even to
your dearest friend, nothing except that
which is pleasant shall be said about the
home or its inmates.
Having the close companion for whom
you care, remember, if you wish to
keep her. that it is the little things and
not the great actions in life that count.
You are certain that you would die for
your friend. In these matter-of-fact days
our friends want us, not to die, but to
live for them, and to live in a pleasant
manner So give to her the small pleas
ures of everyday life; You count them
small, but they are great, for it is these
small things that make life worth living
at all. Don't wait until your friend is
dead to speak of your love of her; take
the alabaster box in which is hidden all
joy and sweetness, and give her of its
treasures while she is still with you,
instead of keeping them sealed up until
she is dead, and offering them as trib-
ute to her memory. Give her flowers
every day, flowers in the form Of pleas
ant words, of kindly deeds and of low
ing thoughts, and do not keep the flow
ers to cover her cold body with. Any
stranger can send in a wreath of roses
when one is dead, but it is the close
companion only who can give the wreath
formed of the flowers of thoughtfulness,
of kindness and of consideration every
day in the year.
Between friends there must be close
sympathy, and one must be able to give
TO the other what she lacks, but even be-
tween those friends who are nearest and
dearest it is not necessary to lay bare
ones heart. Such confidence is too apt
to be greeted with a curious satisfaction,
and even from friend this qualification
makes one feel as if ones bruises had
been touched with vitriol A real friend
asks no questions. She takes the best
that comes, the best that is in you, the
best that you care to offer her, and de-
mands nothing more. She has long ago
learned, being wise, that to all of us
there comes time when nothing should
be said; it is true there is a time when
something should be said. but there is
never time when everything should be
said. There is very often silence be-
tween two women friends that means
rest, and she is unwise who breaks that
silence.-Ruth Ashmore i'll Ladies Home
Journal.