Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1896-12-05
NOTES AND COMMENTS.


In an hour the dusty streets of our
beautiful city turned into lovely
glossy mud.
! We regret to learn of some of our
people losing their fattening hogs re-
Gently Mr.. Keplinger lost some Of
his-very large ones. Opinions as
to the cause are numerous. 1t is very
discouragiug to lose them on the eve
OF butchering.
The local Editor Of the Herald is
now numbered with the married peo-
pie. We hope his future will be
bright, pleasant, happy and prosper
GUS. If any troubles are to intervene
may they consist only of little ones.
We read of a wedding in North
Carolina which certainly takes the
lead, SO far as wedding festivities are
concerned. The groom was 90 years
old, the bride handsome girl OF 10.
The guests consumed 10 turkeys, so
chickens, 8 hogs, S oxen and barrel
of corn whisky, beside the cakes, con-
fectionery, wine. ETC., required on
such occasions. We would suggest
that barrel of onions should have
been consumed to add publication and
strength to the happy couple and
their numerous guests.
1t may seem little singular to
state that the thermometer registered
here on Thanksgiving day the same
as it did on the 10th of June of this
year, when we read of the immense
SHOWS and chilling blizza rds in north
western Minnesota aud the Dakotas,
and OF their continuation for more
than 90 hours without any cessation.
We should never think of complaining
of sudden changes from heat to cold,
but how fortunate we are that our lot
has been cast in such a pleasant,
healthful, prosperous and fertile val
ley as the Shenandoah, protected as it
is on either side by mountains, which
act as barriers between storms and its
inhabitants.
We were panied to learn of the
death of Mr. John H. Potter, who was
an esteemed friend and associate of
ours. Our hope is that he may be
forever at rest, that rest which re-
inaineth for the people of God.
A sad sight indeed, was that we
beheld recently of the father being in
toxicated to insensibility and wallow-
ing in mud and filth, while his little
son, not five years of age. stood weep
ing and gazing on the Incorporate
parent with what anxiety only his
little heart could express. Oh, what
an example, what instructions for
good, ,could this pooroch;ld expect to
receive. Is it any wonder so many
boys are hayward and that their &C.
tons are in line with the lake that
! burneth with FIRE and birthstone?
WHEN DEMOCRACY WILL SUCCEED IN
WEST VIRGINIA.
When the lion eats grass like an OK,
And the fishing worm swallows the
whale;
When terrapins knit wooden socks,
And the hare is outrun by the snail;
When serpents walk upright like men,
And potato-bugs travel like frogs;
When the grasshopper feeds on the hen,
And feathers are found on hog;
When Thomas Cats swim in the air,
And elephants roost upon trees;
When insects in summer are rare,
And pepper ne'ermakes people sneeze;
When fishes walk over dry land,
And mules on vegocipedes ride;
When foxes lay eggs in the Sand.
And ladies in dress take no pride;
When Dutchmen refuse to drsnk beer,
And girls get topreaching on time;
When billygoats butt from the rear,
And treason's no longer crime;
When the humniing bird brays like an ass,
And limburger smells like cologne;
When plowshares are made out of glass,
! And Texan cattle refuse to grow horrs;
When the cabbage head sprouts crowns
of thorns,
And ideas grow in Popocrsts' heads;
| Amd wool on the hvdraul;c ron,
Then West Virginia will be Demo
cratic, and der industries won't be
worth -. RALF.
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u atE YcI1 &c me - ohear..ad ti,n .,,n.a h.