The Superior times. [volume] (Superior, Wis.) 1870-1912, 1896-12-05
HOW A HAT GETS AWAY.
One of the AGgravatinc Experiences
of Men Generally in City.

- a.
of Men Generally in a City.
a perfect gale was blowing. 1t roar
ed through the square ana plunged in
to the avenue beyond like the narrow
ed current of a stream pouring from a
whirlpool into a mountain gorge. Men
were cautiously hanging to their hats.
and women franticaily struggling with
their skirts. Storms Of grit beat against
the windows, and pedestrians bent for
ward and held their breath as they met
the stingin@. dust-laden gusts.
Suddenly something white whirled up
against the soldiers monument. Higher
and higher it rose-ten. twenty. thirty
feet Then it lowered for q moment
like a bird. and made a swift Slanting
flight into the avenue. II was a brand
new straw hat-0nc of those that ripen
suddenly at the close of the season and
fall on the bargain counter.
People on both sides of the street
stopped to watch its glimnering fight.
1t struck in the center of the electric
car track. made a low, Skimming bound
of fifty feet or more. and then settled
into a scOrching gait down the avenue.
\ man nearly block away saw ii com-
ing, and ran into the street 10 intercept
it. With feet OutSpread, knees Rugged
together and extended arms. he stood
waiting. The flying hat struck him
midway between ankles and knees.
bounded breast high and flashed over
his shoulder before he had time to for
mulate single eXpletive.
BY this time he had turned SheepiShly
around to see what had become of the
fugitive i was already a bobbing
Speck i'll the distance. Then Il trans
verse current of air caught it. ana il
sweryed to the sidewalk. Three or four
ladies lodged it, with little feminine
shriekS. Then another man esSayed
to stop it. but just as he was bending
forward and about to lay triumphant
hands upon it the evasive hat lodged
with lightning rapidity and went bowl
ing down the gutter.
In the dim distance a bareheaded citi-
zen labOred i'll pursuit His breath and
strength were we'll nigh spent. but still
he kept desperately on, shouting and
gestCulating. The mania of the hat
chaser possessed him. He could not
stop, though nature and reason urged
him 10. SO long as he could keep his
flying property in view, so long that gal
vanic action of legs, arms and lungs
must continue.
At last two men planted themselves
abreast in the path of the whirling has;
Surely thus far, and no farther it
| might come, The hat-chaSer paused.
with all his anxious soul shining in his
| beaded face. Like an arrow the hat
darted upon the two obStructionists.
There WAS moments Wavpring on
| their part, slight change of position
and between them It flashed But the
wiri"r of the two men was not to be
! thus baked. With the speed of a
Splinter he pursued. and. finally. max
ing tremendous squirt, got abreast of
! the hat, and stepped on it.
Five minutes later the parspirine
| owner arrived. He took his hat. now 4
crushed and Shapeless mass. from the
hand of its captor and gazed darklv
| upon it. For minute exhausted ma
! ture forbade speech.
Then the man Kissed. with sibilant
rage and disgust:
"Confound YOU, If you were a goat
| I'd make You eat it.'-Detroit Free
Press.