Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-03-18
ataHside Gatherings.

WOulu OO ho
p@- The memory, it has been decided,
is stronger in summer than in winter.
s@ Egyptian sugar is being import
ed because of feared shortage in the
Cuban crop.
H9- All the gold, iron and coal which
Australia produces in 80 years it
drinks away in 10.
p9 "We've got dolly that cries" is
the way little four-year-old announc-
ed the coming of a baby sister.
S@ John Neal says some persons read
mankind as they do a proof sheet,
merely to find the errors and omissions.
p6- 1t was an acute brother in black
who declared that he could talk more
religion in day than he could live IN
year.
p6- 1t was once customary that the
number of toasts drunk at banquet
should equal the number of States in
the Union.
p8- Reed pens split at the end like
Quill pens have been found in Egyptian
tombs dating probably $500 years be-
fore Christ.
sS- A sign posted up in Wisconsin
sawmill reads: "The saws are run
ning--no use to touch them to con-
vince yourselves"
R8- Constantinople had snow-storm
heavy enough to prevent trains from
leaving the city and to suspend navi-
CATION in the port.
p6- The bay of Fundy has the high
est tide in the world. 1t rises foot
every FIVE minutes, and sometimes
attains a height of 70 feet.
sd- "James, you've been fighting. |
can tell it by the look in your eye."
eyes but mother, you should see the
look in the other boys eye."
R6F One of the ironies of life is the
fact that the man who has money
enough to pay as he goes, can get all
the credit he wants.
pd- Josh Billings says that he will
never patronize lottery so long as he
can hire anybody else to rob him at
reasonable wages.
p6- Persons usually write at about
the rate of 80 words minute, but
read at the rate of 400 words minute
when not reading aloud.
p6 The man who sits down to wait
for his opportunity will sometime dis
cover that it passed that way several
hours before he sat down.
H9 In a New York local court a
few days ago Chinaman who was
called as a witness, took the oath by
lighting a parlor match and blowing
it out.
p6 1t is only by labor that thought
can be made healthy, and only by
thought that labor can be made happy
and the two cannot be separated with
impunity.
s@ A Yankee describing an oppo-
nent, said II tell you what, sir, that
man don't amount to sum in arith-
metic-add him up, and there is moth
ing to carry.
p4 A correspondent says that a
good way to teach calf to drink is to
punch the pith out of a corn cob, put
the cob in the calf's mouth and put the
nose in the milk in the pail.
t6 A woman arrested in Paris su-
burb for illegally setting off fireworks,
said in court that she was merely cele-
brating the anniversary of her hus-
bands death.
H@ There is a superstition among
German peasants that if a young girl
buries a drop of blood under rose
bush it will ever after insure pair of
rosy cheeks.
p@ A Democratic speaker said in
Rhode Island, the other day, that the
Monroe doctrine simply meant "you
can't cut cherry trees in our back
yard"
s6F Every time a business man talks
hard times he loses trade by so fright
ening some people that they will hide
their ready-made money instead Of
spending it.
s@ "Dad, what's running account" "
'It's an open account with drygoods
store, my son, which keeps your moth
er running down town all the time to
buy something"
H~ An image impressed upon the
retina of the eye remains there an
appreciable time. This is the reason
why a torch swung rapidly seems to
be circular flame.
ST A gloomy prospect: "You have
an immense amount Of hay" observed
the visitor at the Clover-meadow farm.
"Ya-as," said Farmer Redneck, "but
there amt dang thing t. feed it to
but bicycles"
s9 "Johnnie, said his mother, "did
you get any marks at school today for
conduct ?" "Yes," promptly replied
Johnnie, "several; but if you want to
see them, I'll have to take off some of
my Clothes"
~ At a dinner given to Hall Caine
during his recent visit in Ottawa, a
gentleman, unexpectedly called on for
a speech, rose with the following
quick composition
| If you ask me to speak in the presence OF
| Caine.
While the rest of you set round the table,
I'll rise in my place at the board and
| explain
That, though pious and good, I'm not
| Able.
a9r "It is no use telling you to look
pleasant" said the photographer to
the pretty young lady, "for you can
not look anything else" And his
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