The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1896-08-21
MTAA0RpH]SIS FINANCIAL.
Farmer snodgrass Receives the Light on the
Currency Question,
lightning Does for Him What All the
Wise Ben and OeulIsts COuldn't Do
In Regard to Opening His
Eyes TO Sight.


political metamorphosis. This is the
result of a miracle. Farmer Snodgrass
was blind. That is, to some things. No
one could squint down squirrel rife
with tFuer eye, or detect the surrepti-
tious approach Of the small boy to his
water melon patch as we'll as he. But
politically, he was as blind as bat at
high noon. His political view, there
fore, was limited to the description
be found in the columns of the Gold
town Bugle, which he had read, man
and boy, for 40 years.
Farmer Snodgrass was a republican
by tradition and birth, and gold-bug
through the travails of his party at their
late convention. He had inherited his
politics from his father and also several
well-appointed farms. He echoed the
platforms sophisms of "parity," and de-
elaFed for a money that was good in
Europe-a dollar of gold. The pur-
chasing power of the dollar, he held,
must be based upon the gold standard,
and every dollar whether of coin or
paper should zoe kept at par with the
standard of England. He stigmatized
the silVerites as regulators, debasers
of currency, heretics, fanatics, anarch-
lists, and robbers, plying their nefarious
trade in the interests of the silver bar
ons who sought to force SO cents worth
Of silver upon the poor bankers and
bondholders for a dollar Silver was
all right for money so long as it was
not coined on private account and not
used as money of final redemption.
The reconciliation of silver he knew
to a certainty would result in mono
metailism and destroy the parity. The
only true bimetallist5 we're the repub-
licans, who believed in keeping up the
gold reserve and floating the silver coin
and paper money also at par with
gold. The republican party never let a
dollar become less than a dollar while
there was an ounce of gold to borrow
aud no man need fear that dollar re-
ceived one day would shrink to 50 cents
the next. He scorned the statement
that under free coinage silver would
rise to its coinage value, and solemnly
asserted that the ignorant foreigner
and the American miner would sell un-
der free mintage law dollars worth
of silver for so cents. Swelled with his
own Importance as financial seer,
Farmer Snodgras5 announced himself
a candidate for road 0verseer, subject
to the action of the republican town
ship caucus, on a platform in conform
ity with that of the national convention,
particularly SO in regard TO the iinan
Cial plank.
Pride ever cometh before fall.
Farmer Snodgrass sold a farm re-
Gently. Having, although good re-
publican, run little short on conf
dence, he did not deposit the receipts
in the bank, but slowed them away in
an iron chest securely hid in the hay
NOV. In that chest was $1,000 in gold,
5000 in silver, and $1,000 in green
backs and national bank notes. Every
dollar was created under republican
laws, every dollar was at parity by
republican laws, and he informed his
better half that evening at supper time
that there was no danger of that money
shrinking for every dollar of it was re-
publican money. After prayers and a
salutation to the picture Of Baby Nc
Kee, the good mau went to bed aud
soon sauk into The sleep that comes to
the just.
Midnight came, as it is in the habit
OF doing, and Farmer Suodgrass being
awakened by the violence of raging
thunder storm, soon discovered
chat his barn had been struck by light
ming and was feFcely burning. All eff
forts to save it we're futile, aud, when
daylight came, all that was left of the
barn and its contents was heap Of
smouldering ashes. He found the
money chest intact, but on opening it
be discovered the coins had melted and
the paper money been reduced to ashes.
His faith in republican money was fast
ebaiag away. The next train took him
to Washington. He explained matters
TO the treasurer and asked for the equi-
yaient of bis destroyed currency The
treasurer kindly told MIN that the gold
could be recOined, the silver would
have to seek a commercial market as
q republican congress had repealed the
tree coinage of silver Law, and that the
republicans and a few democrats had
also repealed the only law under which
he wes authorized 20 buy silver; that
rs the government did not conduct a
snap factory the ashes Of the bills also
would have TO be disposed of in an open
sharket.
.sBet the parity protested Farmer
s10dgrass. "Don't the st. Louis plat
zQ1m say that siuee<zs79 every dollar