The morning times. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1895-1897, 1896-08-21

The mermaid may be but fairy o
iiction, but the merman is matter ol
fact Mermaids are to be found only In
at Emergency Hospital.
J Jerry cant hes on one of the soft, white
! couches in the sunny south ward OF
Emergency Hospital The cot is as dry
as the MaJave. No great anchors, wedge.
| OF gold. or heaps of pearl lie in its tepth hs
! No fin mars the quiet Of the sheets No
seaweed grows there The only thing
10 suggest the rythinic swish of waves, The
loom of surf and other sounds of the sea
Is the patient who lies upon that restful,
downy Cot
Jerry Cant is partly human, partly finny
He Is partly flesh, and partly fish. This
Is not fish story 1t Is not a sailors
yarn. 1t does not owe its origin to the
foreoastie, and is not Favored with tar
or oakum. The story Is taken from the
record: the record of Emergency Hospital
This is how it came TO be upon the record
and how Jerry Cant happens to be partly
a man and partly fish:
BURNED HIMSELF PURPOsELY.
CANT is tramp. tramp of the most
pronounced type. Only that part of him
which is fish knows what water is. Cant
struck upon thought two weeks ago
which promised rich yield of treasure.
He mixed a pot OF lye Of the same kind
which is affected by washerwomen and
used on policemen.
He bathcd his right arm with the sol ut on
II was hot stuff. 1t panied more than a
uiSOrteTpu (nnSripucp Cant all
this, but regretted not. The terrible burn,
thought he, would bring him into public
favor. No stranger would look upon that
horrid wound without being stirred To
pity for the man who bore it.
He swaddled ii in cotton cloth and went
upon the streets. Hereaped a richer harvest
with that wounded arm than If il had
been sound and strong. People she'd
tears and nickels on unfortunate Jerry
CANT.
Jerry would tell his patrons that he re-
ceiveti his fearful burn in rescuing little
child from devoUriBg Flames. The story
caught Oh and Jerry became Il prosperous
tramp. But the woInd became more trouble
some day by day. Cant tried to heal it.
but without avail. He tried to quench it
with oil, but the burn burned on. Deeper
and deeper it scared into his flesh. He be
came too i'll to solicit aims. and quit the
street. Yesterday he went to Emergency
Hospital. Surgeon Withers looked at the
wound.
CATk ISH A SUBSTITUTE
The only thing can do with this rm,"
said the surgeon, lis to put a new skin
on it."
1T will take lust about two doilars'
worth of new skin to fix you up. We
usually ase frogs for this operation. and 1t
will take four first class croakers To- do the
Job. and they VIII cost so cents apiece.
Just now Emergency Hospital has no frogs
in stock" Thus quoth the surgeon.
Then an idea Ga wned on Surgeon Wi,hers-
Joe, the colorcd ianitor, had long pc
,itioned that he be permitted to go a-fishing.
Withers saw his opportunity.
joe said Withers. ''uf you 20 down
to the river and catch lie some catfish
I'll let you Off t..
AS the sun was hanging golden crowns
on the brow OF the Virginia hills. Joe
Withers set to work. With the aid of
Joe and ore of the nurses. he skinned
four fish and transplanted their skins
upon the arm of Jerry Cant. the tramp.
Jerry was put 10 bed, and the operation
promises to be swimming success.
This is how Jerry Cant. the tramp.
happens to he part man and part fish.