The islander. [volume] (Friday Harbor, Wash.) 1891-1899, 1896-02-13
REV. EVOLUTION wHALEBACK.

Joyin tolerble good health at dis pres
ent time, rs very happy to be very
sorry to say dat since de las time wot
we met rs done bin sufferin wild err
cute tripod ambrosive OBJ de elocution-
airy paradox an I hopes yo all may
long enjoy de same blessin. De sub
ject on which 1 lows to distract yer
minds disebenin am an ole sayin. Now
come to think erbout dat, dars er heap
OBJ ole sayins III dis ere world and de
heft on EN- needer say wot Ga means
ner means wot da say. But dis sayin
wot Pm ludin at am dis "Man know
yer slf.n Now dat sayin hab bin on
de market cher since Dan Webster
done writ de spellin book, but / amt
nebber met up wild er man yet dat
really an truly knowd his own self. rs
knowd heaps OBJ EN- wot made perten-
tons oh enjoyin de most eminent pus-
sonal acquaintance wild dar selbes
when in fac da was de mos abstrac
strangers. Oar am seberal in dis ere
dissembly wat PEERLESS to know dar-
selbs from de Alferd to de Oneida an
da hab dar own pussonal valuation on
darselbes all fixed de price in dar own
minds an eff Eb Harrison war to sess
de valuation OBJ dis ere county on de
same scale, err 20 mill tax would pay
off de whull national debt, concludin
de last bond ISSUE En- eff da war put
on de block all sold like afore de wah
an er man cud buy EN- fer wot da's
really WORT an den sell EN- fer spot cash
at dar own valuation dar'd be profit
enough in de deal ter boost de gold
reserve up to de high water mark, buy
er seat in de senate all hab enough
left ober to defer de expense OBJ er con-
gressional funeral, an cordin to Brer
Piefer, da's bout de most costive things
dar is. An yet rs OBJ de piniOn dat de
people OBJ dis ere kentry would be puff
fectly willin ter stand de expense OBJ
subjects war only juditicitively chosen.
An / spects dem same congressman
low dat da knows darselbs an da's
spoutin bout de harnlonium affairs in
lucky an de doins OBJ de Cubebs in
Cuba and bout de rights OBJ Billy Iger-
ents an dem other fellers in Vensou-
weely while de people OBJ dis kentry
ar stagerin under err load OBJ finantial
difficulties dat am journalism dis whull
nation an holdin dar breff listinin fer
de fust sound OBJ returnin posterity.
rs declined ter de belief dat when de
people git ernother whack at de ballot
box er heap OBJ desc ere fellers watts so
eminently quainted wild darselbes will
| be akin Whar da am at. MY friends
eff yo study de finantial policy OBJ dis
ere present administration clusly yOu's
gwine ter be nightly surprised wild de
vastness OBJ de vacancy OBJ logical
nationality dat perminents de whull
agrvation. De stidy incline ob de
revenue reseats an de stidy increase in
de expenditures hab cumulated an akin
void in de surplusage, all err cOrris-
pondence OBJ goneness in de gold re-
scribe, an dar pears to be bout as much
sense in sellin bonds ter liquify de
sufficiency as dar would be in packin
| water from de town pump (ef we had
one) wild er bucket to keep up de water
in de bay when de tide am gwine out.
Oar Amt no use in foolin away de time
tryin ter make out huccom dis dat -say
er huccom dat dis way cause de GER
tainty OBJ de fact don't need no provin
an we's er heap more interested in how
| we's gwine to git outin de woods den
we is in huccOm we done git lost in de
fust place. cause we all done settled dat
question in our own minds long time
an we all low dat we dose. Now dis
brings me to de pint dat calls fer yer
megit tention. 1t am de same like wild |
er pusson as wild de govment eff dar am
ar failure oh de revenue dar's bound to
be er correspondence OBJ shortage OBJ
his circulatln megium. Now rs done
hearn some OBJ yO wishin fer dem good
| ole times from way back all [ done
| splained to yO all how dat dem times
wouldn't do fer deses ere times no how,
aldo dar war seberal pints in EN- dat
we cud worry erlOng wild very COM
| Portable. Fer instance, in dem times
de preachers didn't hab ter depend on
de contribution box fer dar libin, ner
on chuch socials wild lister soup thinner
den Populist argument, ner on
church raffells er lotteries, but cherry
body was bleeged to ter glib de preacher
One-tenth part OBJ eberything da had.
Eff yo done raise err flock oh nice plump
chickens yo was bleeged to glib one in
cherry ten ter de preacher, eff dat war
de style now it would save yo pasture
lots OBJ time specially in de dark OBJ de
moon, all don't recon da cher asked
any barrasin questions bout whar da
was raised eder. An eff yo war lucky
ernuff to quit de game wild er good
| tOCk w CHIPS ct llduluIl OU DccI
checks one-tenth OBJ it was reserbed fer
de benefit OBJ de clergy, an de ministers
war on to dar job all right fer da was
round an tuck dar tenth fust au left
de folks to russell fer de oder nine
tenths. But as dem good ole times or
gone an yer belubed pasture am too
old an feeble to study out de new COM
binatiOns wot some OBJ 20 hab put on
yer chicken coops an finds it mighty
tryin to jump er ten rail fence wild er
water million under each arm an de
bull dog cluss in de rear, darfOre de
ways an means committee will be
bleeged ter dept some plan ter stimer
late de flow OBJ revenue in de proper
direction an to keep de stimulation
stimulatin so yer belubed pasture wont
be erbleeged ter depend on SIGH pre-
cocious means fer er libin. An want
yo all to remember dis, amt ludin at
yer neighbor but rs dressin my re-
marks to 70 pussonaly an when de
plate comes round 20 wants to drap
in your sheer no matter wedder its
gold standad, by metal sublunary
coin, legal tender greenbacks, bank
notes er standard dollars, jest SO its
money. Eff yo wants to enjoy er long
life an er clear concience pay de
preacher an de printer chen eff yo hab
to settle wild de balance OBJ de creditors
fer ten cents on de dollar.