The sun., 1896-10-25
FARMER PoAICEMAn,sREpoR1
A Surprise for the Coroner'S Once When
He Used the Telephone.


He Used the Telephone.
A farmer policeman entered the Coronsf's
ONCE one day last week. He was q resident of
westchester county when he was appointed to
the force and although he has stripe on his
coatsleevc showing five years OF service he had
apparently been doing duty up among the
goats ever since his appointment. He was de-
tanned at an inquest and WORKED himself into
great state of mind when he realized that he
wouli not be able to report in person at the
static ..ouSe in time to go out on patrol. He
afraid that charges would be preferred
against him II he did not get there in time.
why don't you telephone to tho Sergeant In
command that you re detained and can't get up
In time 2" said Clerk Murray.
Whats that 2" asked the policeman with
the little bunch Of whiskers on his chin.
why. call up the Sergeant and tell him You
can't get up town in time to report for duty"
How? 2" asked the policeman.
why, on the phone there" said Murray.
pointing to the instrument.
The farmer policeman looked at the clerk sus-
piciously and at the telephone blankly.
well, how kin do that ?" he asked hesita-
tingly.
oh, Just go over and call up your precinct"
The farmer policeman walked slowly over to
the 'phOne; With one eye glsnSing askew at
tiously examined tho instrument and peered
into the transm,ter. Observing that Murray
was not particularly Interested, he got his
m"fia @pss! 0'fsS psi. !" the ''"n'n'''F and said;
There was roar of laughter from all tho
clerks in the offce. and the farmer policeman.
with flushed face, exclaimed
knew yewqz klddln' me al the time. Ye
can't call up tho Sergeant there"
"oh. yes you can, only you did It In the
wrong way VOW va want to call hay! h"yH in
"Uh. that's Il. lsit2 I forgot about it," said
the farmer policeman as he returned TO tho
phone. Hay! hay 1 he called: ,ns..u
Hay! hay.'' yelled the policeman in such a
tone that tho presiding Coroner raped for
The clerks roared with laughter. unable to
keep strH'ght face. any Longer.
man, The color again nantIlng his face as he
moved Away t,om zen, the phone .,,d Mrr,.v
REFRESHING his nrth. Just you watch me call
He Wen, over and yelled Hay! hay" into
trail and called for he farmer policeman's pre-;
cinct. He got IL in due time and then called
over he anxious policeman.
Here You are, now; talk to the sergeant"
The farmer POLICEMAN wandered over and
directed and when, he heard ths SergeRnt's
voice jumpsd up In the air and stared AT the
receiver and then at Murray.
Talk to him; you've got him now.' said
The farmer policeman turned the receiver
Here am"
Put 1t 20 your ear again" said Murray.
TIE farmer policeman did as directed, and
jumped again when he heard "d-r-r-r-r-r-r-r-
r-r.r-r-r-r-r- r-r-up."
Land snkesl What's that ?" he exclaimed.
Here" said Murray, placing the receiver TO
talk in here and isten."
"Oh, hello! sergeant. This is Stumps-yes.
StumpS-DrawsOm Siumps. What's tho mat
teri oh. yUs-the Coroner sez must stay here
for an hour or So yet. All right good. by
Nov hang up the receiver" said Murray.
putting II on the hook after the farmer police
man had examined IL oucp more.
Say, young fe.ler. you're not Joking me again,
ars your"
: N0!'' said Murray, that was all right, on
the lavel."
Was that the Sergeant was talking TO"
"Yes. thAt was he, sure enough"
"Wsll. III stand treat: BY Eoshl thats the
funniest thing | ever Hee."
Stnmps IL not his real name. but the rest OF
the narrative 10 trus, and they have not got
over IL yet In the CoEonSr'S once.