The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1896-01-17
THE NEW WOMAN.

took at the same time from you.'
THE NEW WOMAN.
From the New York Sun
Do you see it?
What?
That.
That what?
Tha, living organism over there on the
street corner.
oh, that?
Yes.
That's new woman.
What's a new wOman-one that isn't old :?
Oh. no; one that Is new In the sense OF
novel.
What's novel about her?
Several things; but underlying them all,
her ideas.
That's what she prides herself on.
Is 1t so ususual for woman to have
ideas?
She thinks so.
What kind of ideas has she?
New woman ideas, mostly.
What kind are they?
Heterogeneous and scattering.
What does that mean?
um-er-well, no two alike and all headed
different ways.
Hasn't she an object?
She Is one.
But she must have some definite aim?
just about the same kind of am aim a
stone at anything.
You say natural woman. Isn't the new
woman natural?
outgrow 1t.
Why?
That's one of her ideas.
Has she any more like it?
Not like 1t, but of the same class.
What does she do with them?
Exhibits them, princiDally.
TO whom?
oh, it's free show.
That means that she is promiscuous in
her audiences?
Pretty much promiscuous.
Would she as soon have women as men"
Not quite. That Is to say she wants to
convince the women and convict the men.
Convince the women of what?
That they are a down trodden sex.
And convict the men of what?
That they are the down-treaders.
Do the women believe her?
Those who are not In love do.
Has love anything to do with 1t"
Well, l guess yes. When woman is in
love she hasn't either time or wish to be
anything else but just that
Hasn't the new woman u heart?
She has what the dictionary call "the
muscular organ, situated in the thorax. the
action Of which determines the circulation
of the blood"
What has become Of her other kind OF
heart?
It's all gone to her head.
What effect has 1t on her head?
Jumbles 1t up so inside that she doesn't
know handbook from ballot box.
Does the new woman want to vote?
She doesn't know what she wants. That's
about ninety-nine hundredths what's the
matter with her.
What do the men think Of her?
Ihey never think OF her when they can
And when they can't help 1t?
Oh, they just laugh.
Does she like to be laughed att
She doesn't seem to care.
Isn't ii true that woman can't endure
being laughed at?
The natural woman can't; but we are
discussing the new woman.
Why Is he unnatural?
Because she Is self-made
Aren't self-made men the greatest?
1t Is SO said, but the new woman isn't
man-yet.
Then. what is sauce for the gander is not
sauce for the goose?
Only In the imagination Of the goose.
Is the new woman masculine?
In her mind.
In no other respect?
In her apparel and in her manners, as
FAR as she dares.
What Is she afraid Of?
Other women.
And not men?
Oh no: she isn't afraid of the men.
She can't help being enough Of a woman,
when men are around, to have a certain
instructive effect upon them; but she
can't be enough of man when women
are around to have any instructive effect
upon them.
How does she win converts among the
women?
BY being as womanly as she knows how.
For instance?
She argues for dress reform; she advo.
Gates mild form of weli-regulated inde-
pendence: she suggests a wider intelli-
gence, and does lot Of other talking for
the good of woman regardless Of man.
She isn't quite fool, then:
Not by several lengths.
Does she win many converts?
She wins some, and sets a good many to
thinking.
Why isn't she successful with all wo-
men?
after 5000 years of being a woman, finds
some difficulty In growing whiskers and
putting on pants In a hurry.
Does the new woman advocate such radi-
calism?
The real new one does.
Are there degrees OF newness?
Oh, yes; some of the real new ones would
like to see congress pass laws repeating
the laws OF nature.
Are there many like that?
About enough to queer the entire lot.
Does the new woman every marry?
Not unless she reforms.
But most of them are married?
1t happened in their natural state.
What kind Of wives did they make?
The kind that hangs the motto, God
Bless Our Home" on the wall and leaves
the balance to the hired girl.
Why were they such wives?
It's way some women have.
Is that the kind all new women are?
Not necessarily; but the good wife and
the good mother doesn't take day off 20
be a new woman.
Some women can't be good wives and
good mothers?
Possibly they could If they tried as hard
to be that as they try to be good men.
Are girls ever new women?
They think they are, but as a rule they
don't seem to fit.
Can't they learn how?
They can II Cupid doesn't happen to
catch their hearts before they have gone
to their heads.
Love unmans them, as it were?
Exactly.
A new woman must be somewhat of an
old woman before she is eminently sue
cessfll, mustn't she?
Yes. The feminine heart was irado =,
fiutter. and nothing on earth can prevent
1t doing something in that line when it is
young and sweet ana beats 10 me Ai,.s..,v
of the music that has thrilled the world