The morning times., 1896-06-07

the distance OF the lecturer from the sur
face or the earth. Her opinions also are
ancIIlary proof that she REGARDS our male
Affections d. un the same order as those
of Mars, where everything possible IS he
ing done To- make u man OUT OF the fe
male adjunct
The special attention Of terrestrial as
trunUmers is directed tothe Venetian sports
Oh the canals. The & Bdoias are auto
IIlshIle, buJ scprChIHg II pTuhIbiJed, also
lava tennis The gundula> are run by the
Vacuum Electrical Company. which i cunI-
posed entirely of women, and which liz .
practical monopoly of the planet The
immense vacuum reservoirs necessary JC
energIze the planet are ti.e cause on the
violent WiniSturIns noted hy astronomers
here, and which account for the absence
of whlskerS on the faces of The baby
carriage rollers and trained nurses
As mas been demonstrated by the first
wedding ceremony Oh Mars, there was no
Fail of Man, NO original or secondhand
sin, and consequently no nCeG Of religion.
When they die they arc neitber cremated
nor stuffed in CUffins, nor ShOtted and sent
To the bottom of the canals. They are
simply translate ed INTO the dead langua yes,
and disappear the belief being that they
are passed on, in their everyday clothes,
up TO Jupiter.
In law and Judgment the female talent
is profound A case in which a man aHd I
woman qUarTeled over the possession of =
baby, went up To the Supreme Female
Justice OF the land. 1t had puzzled all
the inferior courts solomon would have
offered Il, slice up the baby with the sword
of the sheriff, To test the true ownership
The Marian Female Supreme Justice
handed down a decision. in kid gloves.
that PLAINTIFF and defendant We're each
right Each was wIrc'ed q EJlf HdivSible
interest in the property.
Ten Thousand years In the house of bond
age has naturally made the meu OF Mars
some what reStive. They are demanding
equal pay for equal work when they can
do it. certain dress reforms in the interest
Of equal purity for themselves. and the eu-
tire abolition OF tHs liquor traffic which is
controlled by the women who own all the
apple orchards, cOTnfieldS. and vineyards.
Men are StrenuOusly agitatiHg the suffrage
question. and in one OF tw0CaSeS they have
been elected as school trustees. The su-
preme court has, no wevcr. decided that they
cannot hold the position OF Rotary public
All the clerks in the dry goods. candy and
millinery establishments are men or boys.
The Mems Christian Temperance Union
was founded ueaFIyS 900 years age. and has
done good work looking TO the abolition
OF SpeakeaSies as adiunCtS 70 the theaters,
lecture halls, academies and public institu-
tiOns, which, as we have said. are run 10y
the master sex.
The Salvation Army is also a diStinCtvely
male organization. which has wrought great
things in the Submerged Tenth OF Female
Society.
Mars has no moon, and as men do not go
cut at night or to the summer resorts un-
attended by members OF his family. divorces
are unknown on the red blurred planet.
Whenever a woman is suspected of Indis-
erection, the other women do not throw
stones at her. neither do they hustle the
item down To the newspapers The item
and the man are suppressed.
And in any other given member OF re-
spects, Mars has the ideal government OF
the universe from the points Of view OF
the woman'S page. Life is made up OF
floating forever on canals of real water
blue. Iimpid and full OF fish. which are sold
at tnfle beyond the fiSherman's actual
daily expenses
There is no night and no day. The
summum bonum of existence is to beat
the record made by a woman 4, 900 years
ago on the asphalt, of a mile in 1:03s
with her feet on the handle-harS-