davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28

Cee1 three tunes, before he concluded
to accept it,
That is fair sample of human nature
as exhibited at a public restaurant. 1T
happens to be within my personal
knowledge that the senator would not
dare to open his head in protest if his
wife were to give him hog and hominy
for his dinner. He wears the skirts and
she wears the breeches at home; but
at the capitol he is big fellow, and
swaggers about like a born lordling.
It is no wonder that Dick Shaw was
ruff1ed. It would ruf1e you or me to
frightful degree.
Zone of our worst customers" said
Dick Shaw, twas the late Senator Ma
hone. He used to come to the capitol
every morning about ten o'clock for
his breakfast, and he always wanted
griddle cakes. He was very hard to
please. In nine cases out of ten he
would take the griddle cakes, look at
them, punch his fork through them,
and then throw them across the table.
saying that they were not fit for hogs
TO eat. The walters would return
them to the kitchen, and sometimes we
were obliged to cook him griddle cakes
several times before he would accept
them. OF course, there. was no money
in that for US; but he was senator,
and we could only endure and act sub
plissively to him. We got ahead of him
once, though, and the walters still re-
member and talk of it.
Gen. Malone came in one morning
for his griddle cakes and played the
same act. He tossed them across the
table, and the waiter gathered them up
as usual. The proprietor, Mr.. Page,
happened to be here early that morning,
and he Immediately went to the senator
and told him he would personally look
after his griddle cakes. Mr.. Page took
those same cakes, held them over a
steamer again to make them hot, put
them on plate with golden figures on
it, placed silver cover over the cakes,
and personally took them to Senator
Malone, who was pleased with them,
and said: Now, Mr.. Page, why can't
your walters always bring such mag
nificent cakes as these?'
''Of course, Mr.. Page and all of US
laughed heartily over the occurrence" :"
said Shaw, but Senator Malone never
knew that those cakes were the very
same griddle cakes which he had tossed
about the table only a few minutes be-
fore. Senator Malone supposed that
new order of griddle cakes had been
cooked for him, and when the propri-
etor brought them to him in person he
assumed that they were all right. But
it shows how cranky some of the prom
inent men may be when they are in a
restaurant.
81 like to wait on Vice President
Stevenson continued Shaw. "He is
one of the most courteous gentlemen I
have ever known in this place. He is as
polite to the colored men who wait upon
him as he is to the white men of distinc-
ton about here. He is always modest,
unpretentious and courteous. His
lunch is always of the simplest nature.
He has nothing to say to anybody eX-
cept those who talk to him. He comes
and goes without making pretense or
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
His Price = Dimcnltx.

Every man has his price," senten-
tiously announced the philosopher of
the all-night drug store, where the
street-railroad franchise was being dis
cussed.
WELL" said the wit of the establish
ment, II wish somebody would discover
my price and offer it to me-"
''My boy" solemnly remarked the
perfumery drummer, who had not spok-
en- before that evening, ''there is no
smaller coin made than a cent"
And for several seconds there was no
sound heard save the drip, drip of the
real mineral waters from the hydrant.
Buffalo Express
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
THE BATTLE OF ADOWA.
It Was, in More Than One Sense,
an italian Waterloo.
Indirectly 1t May Affect Every Corner o1
Europe Precarious Condition of
King Humbert-Radicals Ripe
for q Revolution.
written for This Paper.l

The recent reverses of the italian
army in Abyssinia have completely
changed the tone of European politics.
At the beginning of the year the Monroe
doctrine was discussed in every cap
ital; a week or two later the South Al
rican episode engaged the attention of
the diplomatic world, and now Italy
forms the center of attraction.
The colonial craze, which seems to
have every power in it's grasp-with
the single exception of Austria-Hun-
gary-is responsible for this latest
slaughter of thousands of Italian sol
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
Establishing His Reputation.

Burden-Goodly must be an awful
liar.
Banting-How can you say such a
thing? He has the reputation of being
the most truthful man in the country.
Nobody ever doubts his word.
Burden-That's exactly why l say
so. Truth is so much stranger than
fiction that a man must be very clever
liar to get himself believed.-Truth.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
Drawing the Color Line.

"They do say" said one new con-
gTessman, that the pink-tea habit is
interfering vita the work of states
manship."
'Well," was the thoughtful reply OF
his colleague, '1 shouldn't wonder If
it did. don't take any stock in these
epicurean innovations. If q man must
drink tea at all let him stick to the
good, old-fashioned green tea he was
used to at me."-Washington Star.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
sas Down On.

Lady-Are you acquainted with Miss
Schmidt?
Dude-Yaas, I talked with her for
half an hour the other night at the ball
Awful stupid cwesture.
How SOP"
'sWhy, you see she nevah opened her
mouth the whole time wath talking
to her."
what! Didn't she even yawn?"-
Texas Siftings.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
TALK WITH DICK SHAW.
Stories Told by the Steward of the
Senate Restaurant.
How to Deal with Statesmen Who Are
Cranky About Their FOOd-COlOred
Man Who Is a Good Deal
OF Philosopher
Especial Washington Letter.l

Human nature is a good study because
we are all more or less interested in it.
You and l are chuck full of human
nature, and we like to study the mani
festations of strength or weakness of
our fellow men and women.
Politicians who want actual informa-
ton concerning local events are wise
when they talk with their blacksmiths,
shoemakers, grocers and other trades
nen and artisans. 1t is said of the
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
a RefutatiO0.

There doesn't seem to be great deal
of money in Stories" remarked the
young man with literary aspirations.
That's where you are palpably mis-
taken," replied the architect. Just go
out and take a look at that seven-story
building / have been putting up
Washington Star.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
In 1900.

Mrs. Emancipus Offering bOx)-Will
YOU have cigarette:
Mrs. Findesiecle-What brand ara
they?
Mrs. Emancipus-Id don't know. They
ere some my husband bought for me-
last Christmas.
Mrs. Findesiec'e (hurriedly) -Than1
you, don't care to smoke just now
y. Y. World.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
The Patient Fish.

First Fish-HOw are you getting
along?
Second Fish-No luck at all. The man
at the end of that line is a chump, or
else he's as full as goat.
First Fish-What's the trouble?
Second Fish, took the bait off his
hook an hour ago, and I've been wait
ing ever since for him to put some more
on-Detroit Catholic.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
The Pink of Politenesa

Miss Westend-Here are cards for my
cousins wedding reception; but as it
is in Chicago, of course can't go. In
sending my card, should write Con
gratulations," or anything2
Chicago Aunt-Certainly my dearSl
write on it: MANY happy returns. -
N " Weekly
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
whore Nrystery DweIls.

There's beauty in the sunsets glow.
And in the azure sky,
There's grandeur in the vasty deep,
And in the mountains high;
There's terror in the tempest black,
And in the lightning's flash;
There's wonder in the armament,
And mystery in the hash
Kansas City Journal.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
just the other Way.

"Why are all those knots tied in
your handkerchief, Stimson ?'
''Oh, they represent various errandS
my wife commissioned me to do"
"And you made thrm on purpose to-
remember?"
mo. On purpose to forget. De
troit Free Press.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28

Romantic Miss-Have there not been
moments in your experience when life
seemed full of nnsatisfied wants?
Mr.. Hardhead-Y-c :, that's so.
AT such times / always fly to music
for relief. What do you do. Mr. Hard
head?'
Il advertise. Odds and Ends.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28

Mrs. .White-And do you mean to say
that you and your husband always
agree about everything?
Mrs. Black-Always - except, of
course, now and thep, when he's out
of humor or pig-headed or something
CT that sort.-Londcn Answers.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
His Great NIistake-

The Wife-When you proposed to
me, John, did you think would accept
you?
The Husband-Not the first time.
'"The second?"
II wasn't going to propose but once"
Puck.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
Praparntions.

WILLIE knew you were coming to-
night-o
Castleton-Why, Willie.
Willie Sister has been asleep all the
nfternoon.-Truth.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
Force of Habit.

Bicycle Manufacturer-Whe am /?
Nearest Angel-Why, this is Heaven.
Isn't it delightful?
Bicycle Manufacturer-Yes, indeed.
It's very pleasant. But. say Cooking
about critically you ought to have bet
ter roads.-Southbridge (Mass.) Jour
nal.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28

Wiggins-Did you ever feel fear, cap
tain, when entering into an engage
ment2
Capt. Armes-Why, nay dear fellow.
was all atremble when I proposed 70
my wifei-Harper's Bazaar.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
Unforgntten.

'.Brookton says his friends never for
get him."
mo. he always bOrrows money from
them. '-Washington Star.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
On Cross-Examination.

What kind of meat did you have for
breakfast"
Don't know"
do you mean to say to the court
that you don't know what kind of meat
you had for breakfast? ?"
Il dot was sausage!"- Chicago
Record.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28
No Fair Weather.

"A king must have a stormy lifes
For though he reconcile
All elements of war and strife
He's reigning all the while.
L. A. w. Bulletin.
Western Kansas world. [volume] (WaKeeney, Kan.) 1885-current, 1896-03-28

First Doctor ordered him an ice
cold bath every morning.
Second Doctor-What! when he had
Influenza!
First Doctor-Yes. It will give him
pneumonia, and made my whole repu-
tation curing that.-Punch.
The evening times., 1896-02-27
ORDERED HIS OWN FUNERAL.
Suicide ofa weilKnown Stenographe
and TeleXrapher.

Chicago, Feb. 27.-William H. Pearson,
. telegra pher and a stenographer OF ma
tional reputation. committed suicide yes
terday by inhaIing gas through rubber
tube attached TO the pipe In his room in
Hyde Park. Tuesday Pearson went to
Rolston's nder,aking establishment and
made arrangementst to buy coffin and have
a funeral conductc . for an alleged friend.
Questioned closely. he admitted that
1t was himself who was to be buried, and
that he intended to- commit suicide. He
gave his right name, but a wrong address,
and when the police were notified they
could not locate him. Pearson took five
grains of morphine without effect and then
alta ached the rubber tube to the gas jet. He
was found dead yesterday morning.
The cause Of the rash act was despondency
due TO the death OF his wife at Iowa Falls.
Iowa. She went to that place to care for
her sick mother. and Sunday morning, not
having heard from her, Pearson went to the
Western Union telegraph office and called
Iowa Falls, and in reply got the following:
I'VE all sympathiZe with you in your be-
reavement."
When he asked the operator whathe meant,
the response was that his wife had died
that morning. Pearson originally came
from Defiance, Ohio.
The evening times., 1896-02-27
PROTEST FROM PHILADELP
Qua kers Are Dissatisfied Over the
Schedule Concerning Their Team

DUAL kers Are Dissatisfied Over the
Schedule Concerning Their Team.
Philadelphia, Feb. 27.-No doubt the
Leagues schedule was put together With
u view of making the most out of It'll. e.,
the most money-for 1t is most peculiar
arrangement of dates in all other respects.
Four of the clubs, for instance-Wa ashing-
ton, Cincinnati. st. Louis and Louisville
have not single game at home on any of
the holidays, and it is very palpable that
Boston and Brooklyn exerted great iDflu-
ence over the man, whoever be is or may
have been, that made out this schedule.
Just how the patrons of baseball in the
four cities not getting holiday game feel
over this slight can only be surmised, but
the people of Cincinnati, st. Louis. Washing
ton and even Louisville must feel that the
magnates did not consider their cities good
enough baseball towns TO give them at least
one holiday date; hence local pride must be
somewhat hurt In those places-
Boston evidently got what 1t wanted, and
it looks as though Mr.. Soden must have had
Mr.. Young under hypnotic influences when
the latter builded that schedule. To begin
with, Boston opens in Philadelphia-theb best
baseball city Of them all-and thus gets the
Dcot VI IL Ou OICiuHs udys I'll DCNOlo-
tion Day. Boston has Cleveland at bone
the best attraction OF all the Western teams
which play East on that day. On Bunker
Hill Day New York plays at Boston.
The Beaneaters again have Cleveland.
the stellar Western attraction and the club
that will be in the race for the pennant
from start to finish. on Labor Day. On
July Boston gets another chance to en-
rich Its treasury by play ying In Brooklyn.
In the matter OF Saturday games at home
Boston is also very nicely taken care Of.
Philadelphia, on the other hand, got moth
ing except the advantage that must accrue
from the favoritjsm shown to Boston by
giving the latter the opening game IN this
city. OnDecoratiOn Day, the sure tall
ender, st. Louis, will be here, while onthe
next big holiday. July 4, Washington will
be with us, Chicago being booked for this
city on Labor Day. A careful perusal of
the schedule shows that the PhiIlies got
the worst of 1t all the way through, 60
far as the Eastern clubs are concerned.
Brooklyn has Chicago ut home ON May 80.
Boston on July and Cincinnati on Labor
Day. New York has Louisville on Decora-
tion Day, but this 10 offset by Baltimore
playing in Gotham on July 4, and Pittsburg
on Labor Day. Baltimore evidently did not
The evening times., 1896-02-27
Parker, Bridget & Co.,
I,Iothie-s BIS 9TH St
SKATE FOR CHAMPIONSHIP.
Eight Men VIII Compete at the Ice
Palace

EixnI MeH w ia NOuiIbtte dl tue 1CC
Palace
Those who attend the Convention Hall
Ice palace this evening will see one OF the
most exciting contests on the steels that
have been held this season. 1t will be 4
race of two and ono-haif miles for the
championship of the District and Mary
land, ard eight men have entered Up TO
the present time to win the championship
and incid .ntally the handsome silver cup
offered by the mana agement of the rink.
This cup, il won by the same person three
years in succession, is TO become the prop
erty of the successful man, and it may be
skated for at any time during the season.
The entries for the race are Saunders,
Sites, Bisneau. Bagg, IlgenfritZ, Libbey,
Baylcy and Lotus, although il is probable
that others VIII enter in time TO qualify
for the race.
Saunders is the present champion of the
District, and his closest competitors will
probably be Bagg and Bsneau. Bisneau
is the wcil-known hockey player of the
players in this part of the country. Bagg
is captain of the st. Johns Hockey Team
of Baltimore and is champion of the State
OF Massachusetts. Bot n are fast men, and
are capable of giving Saunders tight rub.
Sites is a swift man also, and came out
third in the last race Donoghue was in at
the rink. llgen fritz is the well-knowD
fancy skater and the one who beat Dono-
ghue Oh his first appearance in this city.
Libbey is the captain of he Washington
Hockey Team, while Lotus is another fast
Washington boy. 1t is expected that the
Iace will be very close, and there is every
likelihood of a large crowd Of spectators
being present to cheer on their favorites.
The evening times., 1896-02-27
LADIES' CLUB FORMED.
women Will Have Separate Stand
Mt the Benning Races.

women Will Have II Separate Stand
Mt the Benning Races.
The spring meeting Of The Washington
Jockey Club. it is thought, will be a great
success. Notwithstanding the fact that the
association Will be under an expense Of
nearly y$3,0O0perday. Mr.. Crickmores stated
yesterday that the price of admission to the
grounds would be 81 ladies' and gentlemen
alike. The grandstand, clubhouse and
outbuildings at Benning are alnost conl-
pleted- The outlook is very bright. all
things considered. as the local lovers of the
track have entered into the sport with
spirit.
Not only is there a stag club being formed.
but Washington society women have made
up club and will have a brand new stand
all to themselves, at the upper end Of the
grandstand, and entirely away from the
clubhouse. This is novel. and the frs; tine
in the history Of the turf that a ladies club
has been formed for the purpose of attend
ing races.
The evening times., 1896-02-27
WHY THE WESTWARD TRIP?
Brooklyn Clubs Action in Favoring
Chicago Explained.

CnicagO Explained
New York. Feb. 27.-The ma iority of the
National League maGnates left town yes
terday. but those who remained continued
to talk baseball with a vengeance. 1t was
generally conceded by the outsiders that
the League blundercd when the motion was
passed TO take the annual League meeting
away from this city to Chicago 1t has
always been conceded that New York was
the head and front OF the League in the
matter of news and support OF the game,
and the representatives OF the New York,
Philadelphia and Boston clubs are more
than angry over the situation.
The action OF the Brooklyn club In voting
to transfer the meeting from this city
is hard TO explain, although c. II. Byrne
endeavoTed to give an argument today.
There has been so much talk said he,
about the East running the League, that
the West demanded to be heard, and we
believe that in all fairness Chicago is en-
titled to recognition"
In the days OF the old American As
sociation the meeting was held in differ
ent cities, and everybody was satisfied.
New York has had more than its share
OF League meetings, and change will do
no HARM
The national board. at its session on
Tuesday night. awarded Outflelder Null
ligan to the New York club, and Pitcher
Whitehill to the Syracuse club. The
Eastern. Western and Atlantic Leagues
were placed in class A. The claim has
been made for the nnsylvania State
League that 1t should be put in class A,
too. inasmuch as II has club in Philadel-
phia, but the board will not count in the
total population Of the Quaker City, merely
averaging the total poulation Of the sew
en- other cities. The average thus found
will be allotted to Philadelphia I'm the gen.
eral estimate. -
The evening times., 1896-02-27
CRoKER,s HORSES ADMIRED.
Santa Anita and Sir Excess Very High.
ly Spoken of by English Critics.

A@.se
Richard CrOker's racing stable is CON-
nianding considerable attention in Eng
land. There are many good ones In the
lot that will make the English horses
extend themselves in The big stakes OF
the year. A turf writer in the London
Sportsman says OF the stable:
Beyond all question, in my humble
opinion. the horses now in Mr.. Morton's
charge include not a few first class ones,
and when Santa Anita is seen in public
shall be surprised If the critics have
any fault to find with bim What his
form will turn out to be, as compared
with our best horses, no one can at pres
cnt foreteli, but that be is wholly
superior class OF Eorse 10 any of last sea
sons American contingent must be obvi-
Gus to any one with rretensions to form
an opinion on the subject.
"Of the Hanover two -ycar-olls, the white
heeled chestnut westchester is the most
like her sire, and Roman Chief also
shows the quality and general char
acteristics OF tie Old horse. Princeton is
another one that looks like developing
into good performer, while Harvard
and Red Banner, although undersized,
seem to be of the useful kind
Sir Excess is horse OF perfect quail
fty, bay remarkable for his grand
shoulders. length and general racing
like character. II this is not a good
horse 1 shall be indeed surprised. An
other lengthy, racing like customer is
the four-year-old American Rey del Car
reres). Montauk has fined down some.
what since last season. he ought to win
races, but 1t seems an impossibility that
any light boy should be able to extend
him SO that his chances in handicaps, in
all OF which he has light weights, cannot
be considered OF much account"
The evening times., 1896-02-27
WILL START SATURDAY..
AnsOn and His Colts Ready for the
Trip TO Texas

AnsOn and His Colts Ready for the
Trip TO Texas.
Chicago. Feb. 27.-Preparations are now
complete for the Chicago Baseball Clubs
annual soiourn in Texas. Capt. Anson takes
a score OF prospective Colts with him
TO Galveston Saturday morning. The men
will begin practice Immediately on their
arrival, playing almost every day with
State clubs, until they go to Kansas City
to swell the Harry Wright monument fund
by benefit game:
Those who have been selected TO go South
on the training trip are Donahue. Kittredge,
Anson, Everett, DOlan, Parrott, Dahlem,
TRULY, Mcbride, Ryan, Lange, Mcfarland.
Flynn, Griffith, Decker, Terry, Friend,
Rice and Briggs.
The Louisville club is going TO follow
the example OF the Chicago and go South
this year. The Coionels will locate at Hous-
ton to do their practicing. Capt. Anson
is sanguine over the prospects of securing
a few dates with them.
The old man says he vii. be a BILE to Judge
how his men are doing when he compares
the defeats they give the Texas mines with
those administered 10y the Louisvilles.
The evening times., 1896-02-27
AERTVClES FROM ONE EDITION #AEE NEVER REPGATED
FIGHTER BADEN ARRESTED
Lee, His Opponent, Thought to
have Left the la District. -,
Policeman Green Of .Anacostia Says
He Can Bring ut Least Dozen Wit
nesses Who Saw the Affair.


Warrants have been swHn out by Police
man Edwin Green OF the Anacostia force
for Marion Baden and5Robert Lee the
fighters who black-eyed themselves Sun.
day night last near the south side OF the
Pennsylvania avenue bndm.
Baden was arrested tqdayi and taken to
the police court, where the rAfse went over
until tomorrow, when the ft3ficers expect
TO have Lee, who has beer, keeping out OF
the way and is reported toTh skipped
town. nan
Owing to the nature Of the prize fight
ing law, which says the tfen must either
charge admission or figh6 fer wager,
neither Lee nor Baden are charged with
prize fighting.
There Is a Jaw whichi eouers the case.
however, and that is of assault. Baden
is charged with assajilting Lee and Lee
is charged with assaul,ing Baden.
The police OF Anacostia say they Will
put an end TO the scraps II such Il thing
is possible. This is the second fight which
has taken place ON the hill just above
TwiDing City, Lee the defeated man this
time, having before knocked Out fellow
named Garges On the same spot.
1t is understood that Officer Green has
over a dozen witnesses who will swear 10
having seen the match. The first infortna-
ton the police had concerning the match was
read in The Times the next day. and they
Immediately set TO work to get the often
ders. Officer Green was assigned the case
and soon had sufficient information TO war
rant the issue OF warrants.
The place where the fight took place is
said 10 be general meeting place for
some OF the East Washington sports, and
the residents OF Twining city are highly
indignant over the actions OF the youths.
1t Is the zane place where last Fourth
OF July a ooiored boy was badly beaten
by a crowd OF drunken toughs and thrown
down the railroad trestIc.