The news & observer. [volume] (Raleigh, N.C.) 1894-current, 1896-01-18
NOTES AND COMMENTS.

NOTES AND COMMENTS.
Foraker says he is for silver lie and
John Sherman viii not be loving
pair.
The next time North Cardinals
Senators decide to annihilate Senator
Hill they should pounce upon him
while he is asleep Washington Post.
Mr.. j. III. Mills gives the Biblical
Recorder one good piece of advice in
these words: Give us one good joke
in every paper. Everybody loves to
laugh sometimes. | mean true jokes"
Mr.. Merrimon, a gentleman who has
had large experience in hens and who
all this time has been keeping tab on
them in the interest of trade and com
merce, writes to the Utica On. W
Press to say that the annual net profit
in a hen of average industry is $4.33 Is.
AS for myself says Cen Alger,
Il am a candidate for no Office. A man
who is not candidate is in a far bet
ter position than one who is. He can
eat where he wants to and go to bed
where he wants to. He can talk as he
pleases. He can travel where he
pleases, and no one has any right to
question him If he can pay his way.
He feels freer and better than cam
didate."
Io1r In44
just published are full of racy read
ing. Here is one little tid-bit: "A
lady was telling me yesterday that she
had recently met Herbert Bismarck at
the Duke of Westminister's, and never
came across more conceited prig. |
should like to cross Herbert bismarck
and Herbert Gladstone in one blanket
and their papas in another. / must
not venture to say more, or / will shock
even you"
An English paper reviyes an old story
about Artemus Ward. When he was
in London he gave a children's party.
One of John Bright's sons was invited
and returned home radiant. ''Oh,
papa" he explained, ON being asked
whether he had enjoyed himself, Sin
deed ! did, And Mr.. Brown gave me
such a nice name for you, papa"
What was that?'' ''Why, he asked me
how that gay and festive cuss, the
Governor, was!" replied the boy.
A recent visitor to New York was
introduced for the first time to waf-
fies. He enjoyed them immensely, and
it was with difficulty that the cook
could keep up with his appetite. Fin
ally he said to the waiter: Say, mis-
ter, bring along them cakes little
faster, can't you? They are powerful
good eatin', and / amt goin' to stop
till I git plum full. Tell that Teller
out there he needn't stop to put that
printin' on 'em-jest send 'em in
plain
young ensign courted rich Adj
miral's daughter in Washington, and
the Admiral told him to move on"
that he had nothing but his salary,
and could hardly support himself,
much less a wife. According to Jack
Cohen, who tells the story, the young
fellow replied
''Well, Mr.. Admiral, what you say
is true. But when you married you
were only midshipman with even
IA smaller salary than mine. How did
yon get along?" asked the ensign, who
believed he had made the most diplo-
matte OF defenses. But not so. The
crafty old sea dog Numbered forth:
Il lived on my father-in-law for the
first ten years, but I'll be id If you
are going TO do it,"
Jack Cohen writes to the Atlanta
Journal: "a great fortune could be
made out Of the new National Nui-
sance, Senator Marion Butler, of North
Carolina, if he could only be bought
at the public's valuation and sold at
his own. For pure unadulterated
esotism and childish ignorance of
public questions and all of the pro-
prieties of public life-this fresh pro-
duct of the Tar-Heel "fusionists"
has had no equals or superiors in the
luemory of any living man who has
ST lied the queer characters that ride
!.t}e On top of the waves OF political
unrest lie has already distanced the
poer, be-whiskered PETER in his chosen
field, and it is cruel injustice 10 call
htA Stewards understudy.