davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10

The secretary vulture will often take
up an oyster CT terrapil i'll the claws Of
one foot and dash it violently against a
stone to crush the shell and enable the
bird to get at the contents.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10
Got 1t Printed.

A young woman in New York wrote
a piece that she considered funny enough
for the humorous weeklies. Il was a
brief skit Of about so lines. but the hard
hearted editors failed to see the humo1
in it and kept sending it back to her,
Finally the young woman lost heart
completely, when her brother took pity
On her and said: "Herc, give me that
stuff. I will get it published Or know
the reason why" A week or two later
the alleged humor appeared in a funny
paper, and tie young contributor enjoy
ed the delights Of authorship. The con-
tribution did not occupy a prominent
place. TWAS among the advertisements,
but she was too content to see her work
in type to inquire further. The only
thing that bothered her was the twinkle
in her brothers eye, which she could
not understand. He had paid full ad
vertising rates to insert her story at SO
cents line, single column, one inser-
tion.-New York Correspondent.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10

Az expert tea mixer in China COM
mands hls-: wages, being paid from 60
cents to 81 d. for bis yyns:a
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10
Ancient. Anguish.

cit is believed" said the classical
boarder, "tiiat there was q game extant
in tho days Of Rome that much resem-
bled our baseball. -
''The language shows that, assent
ed the cheerful idiot 1.-THE word fms,
you know, means a tale enGer. IN
dianapolis Journal.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10

AmDlJlous MGslc1an-r have 1ame at
last in my grasp.
Chow sop
You know Mendelssohn's wedding
march helped amazingly in making
his fame. -
"Wel. what Of it,"
IT am going to write divorce
march London Tit Bits
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10
Bows and Firearms,

An accident which shows the danger
of not teaching boys how to use firearms
is reported in The American Field. Sew
enteen-year-old James Groat of Omaha,
with three comrades, was hunting ducks
on the river. Not finding the birds
plentiful, boy fashion, they thought
they would play about in the willow
blind. They laid their guns down and
began to skylark. ALI of sudden a
flock of ducks was seen coming, and
there was a rush to get the guns.
If young Groat had been brought up
right, he would not have left his gun
cooked and loaded, he would not have
grasped it by the muzzle and pulled it
toward himself, the trigger would not
have caught in a twig, and the lad
would not have been killed. The top Of
his head was blown to pieces by the
whole charge of shot entering just
above the nose.
When boy wants a gun and is i'll a
place about which game is to be found,
and there are hunters to hunt it, the
boy is going to have it by hook or crook.
So the best way to do when a lad shows
the symptoms is to put him into tho
hands of a good hunter and have him
taught what to do and what not to do,
especially what not to do, and if good
gun, built by trustworthy manufac-
turer, is given to the would be hunter,
there is no danger whatever. If this wa1
done in every instance with bows tberG
would be no accidental killings. It ia
the self confident, self taught man who
kills others and himself.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10
HOW TREATIES ARE MADE.
The Initistive. In Negotiations With Fo
eign Powers, Is With the President.

The Initietive, In Negotiations With FOR
eign Powers, Is With the President.
"The treaty making power is given
to the president, in connection with the
senate, by the constitution, writes
General Harrison in his "This Country
of Ours article in Ladies Home Jour-
nal. "The initiative-the negotiations
with foreign governments leading up to
an agreement, and the framing OF the
articles of the treaty-is with the exec
utive. The senate has no part in the
matter until the president communl-
Gates the treaty to it and asks its con-
currence It may then, however, either
concur or reject, or concur with amend
ments When the executive has agreed
with any foreign power upon treaty,
and it has been duly signed by the plen-
ipotentiaries for their respective govern
ments, it is sent to the senate for its
concurrence, and is considered there IN
secret session. Whatever may be said
as to the wisdom or necessity Of secret
sessions for other purposes, it is mani
testify necessary that the terms of treat
les and the discussion of them should
in many cases be kept in the confidence
of those charged with concluding them
until they are concluded.
"Though all the attempts in the con-
stitutional convention to give the house
of representatives part in the making
of treaties failed, it is still true that
many important treaty stipulations de-
pend for their execution upon the action
of the house. If treaty stipulates for
the payment of money by the United
States, the money cannot be taken from
the treasury without an appropriation.
It may be said that as treaty is part
of the Supreme law of the land, it is
the duty of congress to appropriate the
money necessary to carry it into effect,
and that in the making of the appropri-
alton the house has no right to consider
the question of the value or propriety
of the treaty. But, all the same, if the
appropriation is not made the treaty
fails. Usually appropriations to carry
out treaty have been given freely by
the house, but there is power to with
hold them, and so to defeat the treaty.
AS to treaties involving our revenue
laws, the house-having by the consti-
tuition the sole power to originate rev.
enue bills-has claimed the right to act
upon a consideration Of the wisdom OF
unwisdom Of the treaty."
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10
An Illiterate Preferred.


There are many who object to the
education Of the masses, but the follow
ing advertisement is the first instance ]
have seen of an employer of labor ex-
pressly STIMULATING for ignorance as a
qualification for employment:
Wanted-A thoroughly capable, en-
ergetic, all around gardener; small
winery and greenhouse, cows, pigs and
poultry; boy kept; a man who cannot
read and write preferred; age about 80;
must have first rate character; wages,
81 week and small cottage Apply,
stating all particulars, to Mrs. Girardot,
Rosehill, Ruabon -
would suggest to Lord Salisbury
and those who share his desire to cur
tail the dangerous operations Of the
school board that it would be good
thing to form union of employers, if
any others are to be found, who share
this good lady's views. The demand for
improved education is largely inufenced
by the fact that an educated man is, as
rule, considered worth more money
than a Ounce. Open up a market for il
literates and you will take all the steam
out Of educational progress. London
Truth.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10

Additional local trains leave Staunton as
follows: Except Sunday--3:39 p. m, arrive
Clifton Forge 5:55 p. m.
No. z, leaves TAT p. m. for Goshen,
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10

Georgians are "Buzzards," from ;
state law protecting these birds.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-06-10

Additional local trains leave Staunton as
follows: Except Sunday-23 p. NJ, arrive
Richmond 7:45 p. M; arrive at Staunton. $40
a. m. leave 1920 a.. NJ, and arrive at Gordons-
Vile 1925 p. m.
The record-union., 1896-09-13

They said Kingsbury must die: that
there was no hope for him.
No, he will not die" said Agnes. "I
will not let him die" and she kept her
word. They carried him to the tiny
cabin where she lived alone. whose
threshold no foot save her own had ever
crossed. Only one man had ever dared
try to enter and after a disregarded
warning had gone away with a bullet
hole in the crown Of his sombrero as a
souvenir of his attempted visit, much
tc his own disgust and the amusement
of his fellows who teased him SO un-
mercifully that one evening he suddenly
departed for other scenes.
The Missourian went for a DOCTOR
who looked grave but ventured the as
sertion that with very careful nursing
the wounded man would recover
Through weeks of almost ceaseless care
and watching, Agnes nursed him back
to life and strength. At first when con-
sciousness returned, he questioned her
mutely with his eyes and would have
given voice to his question, but she laid
her hand upon his lips. And he was
content to remain silent If only she
The record-union., 1896-09-13
THE DOCTOR.

He must not walk his rounds for fear his
patients think him poor,
And dearly do they love to see a carriage
at their door;
And if his horse is fat she must have little
work 10 do"
And if he's lean the reason is ''he starves
the poor old screw"
Should he call upon his patients every day
when they are i'll
His motive plainly is ''to make a great big
doctors BILL
If he visits them less frequently-thus
less ming their expense
The chances are he'll be accused of will
full negligence.
He must work all day and half the night
and never say he's tired,
For the public look upon him simply as
servant hired.
And should he take a holiday he'll find
when he comes back
Some patients have resented it by giving
him the sack"
Concerning money he must seem indiffer-
ent to be
And folks will think he practices from pure
philanthropy.
When we hear him boasting of the guineas
that he earns
We wonder if they appear in his income
tax returns.
About his own Affections he must never
say a word;
The notion Of doctors being i'll is so
absurd
And when, perchance from overwork he's
laid upon the shelf,
His sympa,t hiZing patients say: "PhySi-
clan, heal thyself.'
London Lancet,
The record-union., 1896-09-13
SURPRISED MISS DEAN.
Again She Was Presented the
Rundses Returned fO Her | Ovar

They had been married, as were few
other people, last June. The favor of
the roses hung above them still, says
the New York Mercury"
This was the day, and this was the
hour when they would have been mar
ried precisely three months
Weren't you awfully frightened?"
asked Mrs. Dearest again.
Indeed / was" responded Mr.. Dear
est, also again.
The waves came as near as they
dared without seeming to be caves
droppers.
Wasn't it nice of me to straighten
out your dressing-room for you?" she
asked, with the irrelevance that is part
OF a honeymoon. Mr.. Dearest did what
IS proper
How funny for you to have two
complete sets of brushes and things"
and Mrs Dearest absently pulled out
her sleeves.
Mr.. Dearest gazed solemnly at the
waves. They winked and nodded
How prettily the letters are twisted
over everything. X. d. is difficult, as
rule. l love your name-Kenneth,"
repeated Mrs. Dearest, softly
According to the waves her husband
lost his head, or it would never have
happened.
The fact is, sweetheart" he said,
with spasm of honesty, zone set of
those things was returned to me Just
before we were married."
big wave pushed the little ones
back as he crowded forward
Who was the girl?" asked the bride
coldy.
The waves fell back in fright. SO did
Mr. Dearest. But it was too late.
We were never really engaged, you
know" he began, hurriedly.
mo, / don't know" severely.
But that was-er-an exchange of
gifts-occasionally.'
Who was she?"
"Er-O-Katherine Dean. Her in
itials are the same as mine, you see.
replied Mr.. Dearest, feebly, as if this
We're a palliation.
Mrs. Dearest started. Then she
smiled maliciously.
You ought to have told me before
You have only got yourself to blame.
Like the loidy' in the song" put in
her husband, with n weak humor, and
with the unsportsmanlike idea of tack
ing because the breeze freshened
Because, went on Mrs. Dearest
with stony impressiveness, yesterday
was Miss Deans birthday, and we al
ways give each other something. and I
thought it pity. to spend my own
money-when there were plenty of
things in your quarters you would not
need now, and so / sent her off
couple of the black and silver brushes
with our best wishes"
The waves crept up to hear. But there
was nothing-only feeling silence.
The record-union., 1896-09-13

will interfere with no social engage
ments or entertainment, day when it
will be entirely convenient for all to
attend. Is one sick or SHINING in the
congregation, one who is nearing the
grave physically or spiritually? We
will visit that one when we can spare
the time from our daily routine of du-
ties. Is a church building to be erected,
a home for God and his people? The
matter of collecting money must wait
until we get through the crops of the
busy professional or commercial Sc
son; and then when we are called on
for offerings, we put off and put off the
needs of Gods home until we have
abundant luxuries of our own-God is
the last creditor we ray."
'On the matter Of religion in busi-
ness,' the Christian Advocate" on. Ed
says: In business transactions it is
the duty of the Christian in dealing
with his fellow men to be governed by
the principles of equity, to give an
equivalent in goods or money for what
he buys, and to return an equivalent
IN money or goods for the price re-
ceived by him for what he sells; the
equivalent representing the value, the
work, and the risk; and it is his duty
to apply the golden rule as to the profit
which he will put upon his wares and
services, charging others what he con-
scientiOuSly believes that they would
have right to charge him under a re-
verSal of the circumstances If any
whom he trusts do not pay him, it is
the duty of the Christian to consider
whether the character and action of the
debtor are such as to justify indulgence
and, second whether he can grant in
dulgence with due regard to his own
solvency, and to make the decision un-
der the influence of the golden rule
should he, however, conclude that the
debtor is endeavoring to impose upon
him, it is his privilege to resort to the
civil law in order to secure the en-
fCrcement of justice; and if he thinks
the debtor worthy of indulgence, if he
concludes it is impossible for him to
grant 1t and maintain his own Solvency
it is then his Christian duty, though he
will regret the necessity, to enforce
his claims by law. Also, in every in
stance in which he has been swindled,
1t is his duty as a Christian, for the
public welfare, to secure the trial and
conviction and Imprisonment of the
guilty person We believe the man who
pursues that course is doing Gods work
as really as the man who breaches
the Gospel"
The record-union., 1896-09-13
THOMAS O'BRIEN

DIR. ]. H. NEAGLE-DEAR SIR:
take pleasure in making this statement.
which you are at liberty to publish or 10
make such other use of as you deem lit,
for the benefit OF those who may be in need
For the last five years 1 have lived in
Sacramento County, and up 70 about ono
year ago l enjoyed good health At that
time | contracted a very severe cold, with
malarial fever This ended I'm bad case
OF catarrh and bronchitis. My head was
at first principally affected. Ihere Were
eyes, often causing me pain In the eyep'ls
Ny eyes would become weak ana watefy.
MY nostrils would at times diseharse a
Watery matter, and. at other tlfneS pe-
come clogged up, so that | could scdrcey
breathe through them. Constant ringing
and roaring noises in my ears distressed
and annoyed me and made me fear that
my nearing was becoming impaired INC
mucous from my head would drop back
INTO my throat and keep me constantly
hawking and gagginr and raising
gradually the catarin, winch nrst ar
tected simply my head and throat, eN-
tended until my whole system was under
nlned III was Catarrh of the Head, 4 Ihroat
and Stomach, believe they called II, but
my lungs and heart seemed to be involved
also Sharp. shooting pains would take
me IN the chest, running through TO tHe
shoulder blades. My heart would beat
py py slow irregular beating and sensa-
ton OF faintness or dizziness The least
eXertion would put me all out of breath;
L mao dlfhculty In getting air enough INTO
my lungs. My breathing was labored. Il
seemed if / We're drawing the air
through sponge. and there would be
wheeling, whiStling kind Of sound with my
breathing.
II had little appetite, my stomach was
weak. and what food ] managed TO eat
would lay like lead upon IT. There would
be feeling of distress and nausea after
eating. My sleep was fitful and broken
In fact, / was broken-down man when
sometime ago went to the Neagle Medi-
cal Institute. / had tried many doctors
and all sorts of patent medicines without
getting relief. | could hardly walk, L was
so weak and sick. Well, you can see for
yourself what DIR. Neagle and associates
have done for me. They have restored my
health. ] eat well sleep well, feel we'll. l
am new mana strong, healthy and
happy man. That is what these phySi-
clans have done for me. If any one doubts
the truth of my wonderful recovery under
the care of these doctors, let them call
upon me or write to me and see for them
selves. / live nine miles from Sacramento
at the town of Freeport.
THOMAS OBRIEN.'
DIR. NEAGLE is a regular physician,
having attended the jefferson Medical Col
lege at Philadelphia, and the Louisville
Medical College, at Louisville, Kentucky,
and graduated with honorS. He also has
numerous diplomas and certificates for
special courses, and has been licensed TO
practice medicine and surgery by the State
Boards of Illinois, Missouri, Colorado and
California.
NEAGLE MEDICAL INSTITUTE OF
PHYSICIANS AND SURGEONS, located
permanently at 72411 h street, Sacramento.
The record-union., 1896-09-13
A Dreadful Record

why does that ancient Miss Treadles
put all those notches in her handle
bars ?''
That's the way she keeps tally OF the
pedestrians she has run over. She was
never known to spare one"
And why is she so bitter against
them?'' 4
"They say that long years ago a
pedestrian Tilted dher."-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
The record-union., 1896-09-13

Containing all the b
news of the Record =
u MON, h a s the
largest circulation ID
Of any paper on the .
Pacific Slope, its "
readers being found =
in every town and a.
hamlet, with a con- N
stantly increasing e
list in the Eastern -
States and Europe. ID
Special attention
paid to the publica- =
ton of truthful d
Of the re-
sources Of Califor- y
MIA and the entire 0Q
coast, best methods -
of agriculture, fruit @
and vine growing. %
The record-union., 1896-09-13

1--WE work at our daily bread winning
a.,ons. we play at religion says
the "Cumberland Presbyterian If
this seems severe charge stop and
anns,der Is a revival desirable? We
.s,,. a. off until we have little or moth
- aIse TO do. and then, amid the de-
pressing m heat of midsummer or the bit
- forhidding cold of midwinter, we
sortara TO hold meeting. Is a
.naoio1 meeting of the church session
s,pso.s.,vp we consult each member
- learn lust when the meeting can
= ra,d without the slightest irterfer-
nth business. Is woman's mis-
49, society. a ladies' aid society,
s.o at,,ar congregational auxiliary to
.neet9 Be sure to name day which
The record-union., 1896-09-13

NEAGLE MEDICAL INSTITUTE OF
PHYSICIANS AND SURGEONS. located
permanently at 72411 h street, Sacramento.
The Roanoke daily times. (Roanoke, Va.) 1895-1897, 1896-12-25
Intlisputable Evidence.

The man on tho bench was a tvpicai
magistrate Of the cactus district. He
was even q greater terror than usual to
evildocrs because suffering the reaction
AIRY consequences of overstimulation.
When the first dilapidated prisoner was
brought before him, the rugged repre-
sentative of the blind goddess showed
his teeth
What's tn charge ag'in this sneak
III Iookin coyotc?" snarled the court.
'Whooping, ycllin an shootin on tn
ntrect, responded the officer. He's
Slippery Ike "
HE looks it. What have you to say
for yourself, Slippcry?'
81 war Jest leavin tn Blue Bottle,
jedgc, when l spies Buck Killmoro
across til street with both guns lookin
my way. He'd swore to roun me up an
shot twice aforc could unlimbor. Then
l cuts loose an makes IL r,nuin fight
ag'in him an his gang
1.-Two years fur perjury, " roarod his
honor.
"But Jockey here. jedge, T.
"Shct up, or I'll mako il fur life.
You're tn rankcst liar ! ever see On tn
witness stan. If Buck had pulled on
you jest once, there would be no more
shootin needed fur to finish yer. Two
years fur perjury goes "-Detroit Free
Press
The Roanoke daily times. (Roanoke, Va.) 1895-1897, 1896-12-25
To rorestail n Probable Ru,nor.

~ = va NS''''i - 4pD'tDic lNuinor.
From Ohio, oh:" said the hotel
clerk, looking knowingly at the name
OIL the register.
Yes, said the man in black, hand
ing his valisc over the counter 'but it
may rs well be understood right now
that | am not candidate for cabinet
position or any other Office under the
sun. My visit to your city has 10 po-
litical significance whatever, and if
any pryng reporters should make in
quiries concerning me you arc at liberty
TO say to them that am DIR. Rybold,
manufacturer and sole proprietor of Ry-
bold's celebrated cough cure, which 7
warrant TO be an absolute specific for all
ailments of tho throat, lungs, bronchial
tubes or diaphragm, including coughs,
colds, quinsy, pleurisy, consumption,
shortness of breath, angina pectoris,
asthma, bronchitis and diphtheria, be-
sides being highly efflcacious in all
cascA of lumbago, peritonitis, neuralgia,
nostalgia, paresis, ophthalmia, neuras-
thenia, cutaneous affections of every
kind, liver complaint, rheumatism.
freckles and ingrowing too nails. Are
you satisfied, sir:"
Yes, sir gaspcd the clerk. -Chica-
60 Tribune.