The herald., 1896-05-11

DeTe d not session dCOnlln up WIeH
1t comes to Herv Lindley bein' declared
five out of de six hundred cases which
were his monthly stipend from de law
department" remarked the deputy Zan-
jero. shaking his head obviously. Steve
Gage has sent word down to John Muir
dat Herv an de captain fell asleep. Just
when dey was most needed to MIND
Silly Arthur. Walter Parker's eyes
give out about de time Frang Short who
is John Dough Spreckels' Parker up
round Fresno, sneaked dat fundin' reso-
luton from outen his vest. We'uns all
thought Short was marching forward
to talk for Susan B. Anthony, or good
reads. or George C. Perkins, or 16 to |.
None of us was next, or de crowd as is
ADDING politics for de valley road would
mt have been seen by our chairman when
1t come to de pinch. But what's de use
aweepin' now" and de deputy Zanjero
gulped down another highball to keep
the tears from turning on full head of
water over his shirt front. Il only got
lack dis mornin', and de first order
was for me to come see Muir on a mop.
skip an a jump. l chases in his private
lean cigarettes like dey was hot
tamales. What's up, says l. Whats
up?" says Uncle Coils head foreman
south of de Tehachepis. why, deres $
'steen kinds of blue hell to pay. De
head office. which with Col. Fred Crock
er an young master Harry. which with
his uncle's honey -combed nephew, an
de law department which aire Herrin
an Steve Gage, has been amakin' de
telegraph wires green for four days,
aswearin' cause Lindley an our smood
push down here lowed dat declaration
for us to pay what we owes to get away
from its parents. Gage, de old geySer,
is amakin' de hardest road He bein'
on de ground. twas his place to kill
de viper hsself, but he failed down an
now he's advocatin me up to head
quarters, assayin' dat il 1 had abeen old
enough to vote I'd had Lindely or Parker
or de Captain pull dat sore tooth afore
1t had chance to hurt. Now head
quarters says Hervey's to be fined
months pay for overlookin' de biggest
bet of de season. an if twant so late in
de year he'd lose his job entire. You
must see Lindley an Parker an tell
'em how de land is alayin, so as to let
me down easy wild de gang, an Muir
gives me a kiss right square where de
old woman feeds me cuStard pie every
Sunday afternoon"
II have seen Lindley an he says nix
1t don't go. Who but me flattened out
John Dough Spreckels so dat 'twon't
cost no more coin for Gage an de rest
of de ba bies to trot on de Sandwich
islands race track up to Ingleside? Who
give to Col. Fred Crocker de only real
swell honor dere was layin loose last
week in de circus ring? Who put de
sweet oil syringe into de colonel an
made de captain de monarch of all he
surveyed? Was it Gage, or Herrin. or
old Senator Carpenter? Nav; twas
me. de hysteppin oxyeyed, double-dyed,
backaction hotstuff of de solid. sunny
south. If I was bein' sold for what / m
worth, stead of gettin' what some odder
ealoot thinks dey aire worth, I'd put in
a claim as would make Crocker. an
Herrin. an Young Harry Huntington
tik de government was atouchin 'em
for what dey owes, but I'm good ma
tured | am an all I wants is what's
regular an some tickets for few of
my friends as wants to see de big show
in ST. Louis mex month, de colonel not
bein' one of 'em, an Hervey shuts de
door to list de executive committee
which aire to do de spendin' of de dough
from Spreckles' Australian trottin' track
in dis campaign.
Dat session up in de malaria dis
trict last week was about de queerest
ever flrted wild. De 'sociation had de
only real sure grip on de play from soda
to hook an nobody else was mex for
more'n minute at a time. Sixteen to
one an Mckinley collar which aire all
brass an made not to come loose, hain't
dat a combination as would blister your
tongue in hot weather? Fred Crocker
on de ticket an de platform agin' Uncle
Coils so plain as de nose on your face
If dat hain't de queerest de world ever
saw, den dis baby'll resign his job in dis
hall to some guy as goes to confession.
Zanja r must be full of oil again, or
else it'll be monstrous dry mex season
wild year full of Sundays.
Us good people as left here last Sun
day had narrow escape. De word from
Huddleson was to put de gaff into young
Grant cause his wife bein' Roman
horn 10 piI1 "a 'cppia finn lind
ley an Parker tried to switch de play
proper, but de snorters like Bob Ling
said nit. We was in a regular sweat
betwixt two days, till Freeman G. Teed
an Frank Flint showed us dat 'twould-
MT do to get into a Irish stew, as 'twould
break old Sheldon's back, an de 'socia-
ton would have to go into de hands of
receiver. Even den nine of de boys
flew de coop for Gleaves. de Shasta San
Garee. but de day was saved. an now
dem San Diego chaps as we pulled outen
de ice wagon is ours for life. Grant is
to be on de ticket wild Mckinley. de
Colonel will get nit. an de captain is to
again boss de coal beavers down by de
long wharf.
Say haint dat harbor resolution for
two, which me an Walter Parker an
Herv. Lindlev served up cold on 16 to
platter to McLachlan, hot boy? DE
law department had "a frozen face
'''''N'
was so raw it give to John A. Pirtle an
Col. Teed de toothache. Dere would
have been a riot If Crawley an Senator
Carpenter hadn't been choked off.
Our next scrap is to 'sist Martin
Marsh an his push in de Democratic
end of de game a-comin' UP in four
weeks. We're for de Buckley end of
that MELEE. an against any more fund
in fooliShness. Maybe We'll try an
keep Steve White from goin' to Chicago.
but dats too hard a Wrestle, an 7 CUES
me an Muir an Tom McCaffery II not
touch dat buzzsaw. Well be busy for
de mex month a-linin' up things for Fire
Alarm John w. Mitchell to be fried to a
finish by Bromo Caffeen McLachlan.
We mustn't Ile-s sG eorg6 I'a,tton run up
again against de Pasadena puddin', or
McLachlan is liable dis time to lose one
of his lungs.
So long, I must telephone to Mark
Hanna as to how me an Hervey an
Walter Parker has met de Colonel, an
we haint his'n. I'll see yuse again.
An IDEAL Silver Pia form
The real silver platform has not yet
been enunciated. What is needed to re-
instate silver in its rightful position In the
world of finance is n declaration that ii