The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1896-03-22
SOME REPRoD LOTIONS OF ARTE-
MUS WAND.
VITA "Reminiscences ~ uis Earlier Life
In Cleveland, Ohio.

otherwise known as Artcmus Ward, went from
Toledo to Cleveland TO become city editor NJ
tie Plain Dealer. mt that time and now the lend
Ing Democratic journal In northern Ohio,
whose proprietor. Joseph w. Gray, wns n pas.
sinnate friend and supporter OF stephen A.
DOUGLAS. a rival journal. the National DIM.
Ocrdt, had been established IN Cleveland for
the defence of the buchanan administrator
In its Kansas policy, the city "dit"r ct which
was a. Minor Grlswold, who was called ''fhe
Fat Contributor" aftcrward for n long period
ono of the editors NJ Icrds Siftinvs. and In his
lifetime extensively well known. Besides the
ram Icdie, Rrd National Dcmorrtt. there were
two other dnilics In Cleveland. the Lelder and
the Herald. The city editor of the H,rdil was
Mr.. j. II. A. Bone. Browne, Bone, and Grls-
void had repeated engagements, In which,
however, Browne always came out victor.
Bone and Griswold were distinctly not in
Brownies class, although Griswold showed n
good deal OF brilliancy, but never did any
thing of permanent value. Bone had plenty
OF Cleverness, but not of a kind tO deal sue
c~cssfully with Browne. As for the city editor
Of the Leader, he had wisdom to avoid any con.
test In which there was 10 pre- spcct OF triumph.
Within n few weeks after becoming connect
ed with the Pidtn Dealer an afternoon paper
Browne began his career ~ "Artcmus Warh'
bv the publication OF n letter dated az pits
burgh. Jan. -. 1897, printed in tn" Pdin
Dealer on Jan. 30. addrcssdh to the editor and
signed by that name.
II rite to no." said Mr.. Ward. "how Is the
show bisnes In cleveland. l have n show con-
sisting In part of a Calirorny Bare . snalks
tame foxes &c. also wax works my wax works
Is hard to beat all say they Is lifclike an nat
eral curiosities among my wax works is our
Snveyer, Gen tayler and Dokter Webster In tho
ackt OF killing DoEtcr parkman. now mr.
editor scratch Off IA few lines and tel me how is
the show business in yure city shal have han.
bis printed ut yure offs you scratch my back
and lie scratch yure back also git up u CRATE
blow in the paper about my show"
The public reception OF this short letter was
an unexpected surprise to Browne. 1t was
talked about ut Cleveland. It was extensively
printed every where throughout the country and
slngularly tlckled the popular; fancy and when
Browne. extre mely Lratitied and stimulated
by. the reception of his letter from Pittsburgh,
same vein. equally drOll and characteristic.
a new figure had appeared In American humor-
Gus literature. which at once took the leading
place, and whose name 81 far as II IL now pos
sibie to iudge.is as permanently enduring
and certainly no historian, giving an account
Of that memorable, meeting, Of his Cabinet on
Sept, 90. 1862. at which nnal action was taken
Mr.. Lincoln's reading of Wards letter entitled
"A High. handed Outrage at Utica" as pre-
liminary to the discussion of that supreme act
of his Administration.
The Artemus Ward letters. in their aggre-
gate. were numerous and unequal in merit;
the fun OF some of them being seriously. at
t tsdn IL hoot In ,or making ! nn a selection tic ,h for p nr3ntsI
in the Pain Dealer were tudiciously omitted,
as was also much other of his work the humor
OF which was of the most genuine description:
A part of this. however, was too purely local
to have any particular point for the general
for that reason; but why some other portions
Of It should have beer omitted is not so easy to
During a consid srabie period of his residence
In Cleveland. Browne occupi,d a room on the
Water street. the windows of which looked out
over Lake Erie and upon the beautiful coun-
try to the west Of the ,GuyahoSa kiyer; a Una ma
He had In this room a little pine writing table.
three or four chAirs-ons If which was a
that lie did some Of bis best work: that work.
at any rate. that earliest attracted the atten-
His sunday mornings were given Up to visits
from his friends. among whom were George
Jones' i; es'' OF N 3 Sroiser- GGaries OF F. ss" Wilso Sonn now ";
cashier of the First National Bank Of Itch.
Cleveland ieS and III two or three others. WV
Jro me was a delightful companion, at all
I maSniinu but oecs spsslsilyf full 10 of "f fun .n sSi 9 sndniqay
not in the least easv to describe.,,one of which
was that of always speaking Of his mother as
Caroline. Sometimes he would read what g
had written for use in tho pam Dealer during
the week; these readings being usually nc.
COInphulCu Wltn running tlihU WIZ
in themselves as droll. or even more droll, be
cause they wee more free, than MS written
withal and made use of his mimicry with
exceeding effect.
As a lecturer on natural philosophy. one
is susceptible OF absolute proof" he solemnly
declared. that a ball will run down an in
| clined plane. and yet how few people there are
who know 1t! An ~earthen bowl dropped from
the roof of a three-story house will; II it strike
a stone pavement. be shattered into many
pieces, A heanpOle. l~egitinately used, Is an
instrument of good. yet /. 1t be sharpcned at
one end and run through n man, 1t will cause
the most intense pain and perhaps produce
contortions. The wick of an unlighted candle
may safely be manipulated. but II you light
and keep It there half an hour. II sensation OF
excessive and d iisoayGsrr ldS,h warmth irnn ro mn maze ne
be dashed violently from the steeple OF II large
meeting house to u brick sidewalk ard sustain
dozen clay Pipes will result differently.
THE effect upon the sidewalk in either case,
upon the ground and let a kitten waiS over
you with perfect safety; but If you put a heavy
immediately experience a disagreeable press
ure. Hasty pudding and milk are a harm
necessarily for six consecntive weeks, it viii
produce instant death. You gaze with indif-
ference upon a bull h whf i he he Is s. p ;msI Se eating
Infatuated and attempts 20 assist you over II
rail fence witt, those horns. they Immediately
the same principle we can easily hold In our
arms an infant, and experience delight in doing
so: but II would he very difficult for us to per
form a similar experiment with q corpulent
old gentleman who Is In q state of unconscious
inehriety. while the delight afforded by the
performance in this instance would hardly
be worth mentioning. All these things seem
wonderful at first blush. hut science makes
them clear as clear can be-"
These propositions. addressed to his visit
ors IA mine Ancient iistos." were deliv-
cred with a persistent serious gravity that was
wholly delicious.
On another occasion he read a poem" with
All - NrnI NNn ~ ~ AUg IanIE M ana
Julian Gear Teed fell from the hclfry ~ the
Methodist meeting house at Ch9rdon, n
Gcauga county. He struck the roof in his fall,
and bounded OFT to the ground, Singular In
sn7, he was not killei on the contrary, quite
the reverse His fall was truly touching, but
touching than his fall. 1t seems that he went
into the belfry "a toll the bell for a funeral.
hut here ID the poem;
l.
"In Charndon, when the sun was low,
Julian Gear iced tO church did go,
To swing the bell tongue to aud fro.