The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-08-06
THE sMARTEsT sIMIAN IN FRISCO
MIR. Joe storms Varied Accomplish
ments at the Age OF "a Year.


From the San Francisco Bulletin.
Joe Storms, the first ourang-outang that
ever visited the Pacific coast, was a pas
senger from Portland, Ore, on the steam
er State of California. Joe Is at present
quartered in a large blanket-like box on
the Oregon dock. attended by a whole
menagerie of badgers. civet cats, pumas,
and other animals. But Joe Is the prin-
cipal attraction, for IL was just about
one year ago that he was brought here
from Borneo on the steamer COptic in
charge Of Mate Storms, who had hunted
on the islands of BorneO and Sumatra,
and during his chases had encountered
and slain Joe's mother. Joe was then q
mite of a simian, all arms and legs, and
as bald-headed as a first-nighter in the
front row, and as hard to please as a
2-year-old.
Mate Storms took Joe up north to ed
ucate him, so he said, but before the
seaman's protege was finally prepared to
receive his education another party pur-
chased him. Joe was taught a good deal,
however and returns to us as gifted as
is Johanna of the Zoo.
Joe didn't enjoy the voyage down the
coast, for he was seasick and could not
eat his customary two meals each day.
He had a good rest yesterday. and this
morning he felt better. Hard-boiled eggs
were served to him at II O'Clock, and
these ne relished immensely, carefully
a man would do. Bananas he is passion
ately fond Of, and he Is as dainty about
turning the peeling back as a lady with
gloved hands would be. After breakfast
Joe rolled himself up In his blanket and
took a good snooze.
Joes hand are dixie those of an old wo-
man, and his face Is not a thing of beauty
by any means. He has a mouth that runs
a good deal too big, and his under Jaw
is rotund and heavy, like the husk Of a
cocoanut. Two intelligent eyes peer out
from beneath a forehead that is always
furrowing like that of man who Is try
ing to do some hard thinking and the
top of his pate has just enough of small
gray bristles on it to suggest the idea
that Joe has used hair restorer with just
the smallest kind of success.
The education of such a sensitive sim
ian as Joe was not an easy task. He
is a tender-hearted brute, and cannot bear
a scolding much better than child.
When whipped he weeps large monkey
tears that roll down to and off that up
per dip like drops Of rain on rotunda.
1t required large numbers Of hard-boiled
eggs and plenty of ripe bananas to entice
him TO carry the bod, dress himself, pull
the cork out OF bottle. and, above all.
ride a bike.
Yes Joe, "bikes," though he is by no
means a scorcher. He couldn't set the pace
for a run to San Jose. nor could he even
ride hard enough to puncture tire. He
does not have to stoop over TO reach the
handle-bars, for his arms are as long as
pumping his elbows are grasshopper fash
ion, above his shoulders. Joe can run along
at an average speed, smoke pipe while
at work and pick up anything thrown on
the ground in the track of his wheel while
under way.
When Joe shows off before company at
the dinner table he takes coat, vest, and
trousers from a small trunk, puts them
on without aid from his owner, adjusts a
collar and necktie. places a napkin under
his chin, and makes himself comfortable
in dining chair. He cuts a slice of bread,
peels a banana. and uncorks the water
bottle set before him. Then he eats and
drinks to his hearts content.
The dock hands on the Oregon dock do
not tickle Joe's fancy. In fact, the young
fellow is not very sociable to strangers
and II is said that he resented the passing
of able seamen in front Of his cage on the
steamer by threatening to grab the offen-
ders by the ankles