The Yakima herald. [volume] (North Yakima, W.T. [Wash.]) 1889-1914, 1896-08-13
Canterbury Ta,ss.


nuncio at Brussels, was deeply offended
while dining out by baron who passed
him snuff box, ON the lid of which was
enameled a feminine figure endeshapille.
Admirably controlling his annoyance,
his future holiness replied; every pretty
Is ii your wife,"
Dean Hole tells an amusing story OF
Yorkshire hospitality. There had been
funeral, and two women were discussing
the event. swell. Sally, l hear you wor
at T. funeral What kind OF funeral
wor III" why, it wor VERY mean
affair. There were nobbut few biscuits
and sich." "Ah, them's the sort Of ways
/ don't hold so. I've lost five, but, thank
heaven, l buried EN- all wi am
A man whom the circumstances Of
travel caused to sit in the same seat With
a young lady who was unusually friendly
said, as he was leaving, II thank you for
a very pleasant chat, but am afraid you
would not have been so kiad to me had
yon known am married man." "You
havn't any advantage Of me-" promptly
responded the young lady. 81 am an
escaped lunatie." And she Was.
Spike" Brady, who was Unknown
baseball player in the Mississippi val
ley few years ago, once attended church
in Dubuque, 10, with his club, which
went on special invitation. The preach
err made special effort, that consumed
much time. Spike" was asked what he
thought OF the preacher. "He got around
to third all right, but, say, he was an ice
wagon in getting home" was bis reply.
Lady Blessington did not always meet
with gratitude from some whose position
at last enabled them to serve her. She
sheltered In her London home Louis Ma
poleon after he had escaped from his
prison in Ham. After Louis Napoleon
became president of the French republic
he turned the cold shoulder on Lady
Blessington aud Count D'Orsay when
they approached him in Paris. Shortly
before Lady Blessington's death she met,
so the story goes, the president driving
in the Champs Elysees. He stopped his
carriage, she stopped hers, aud they con-
versed Tor few minutes. His manner
seemed to her determinedly chilly. "Do
you stay long in Parish he asked. as he
was about to drive on. no." she an
swered, 'and you ?"
committee on speakers for Fourth
OF July celebration in near by town
were OF the opinion that it would be a
good idea to have former townsman,
who had taken the stump on Sc veral oc-
casions and had been favorite in the
vicinity. come from his home in the west
and deliver the speech of the day. They
wrote him to that effect He WAS ia jail
at the time and answered as follows:
my Dear Former Fellowtownsmen 1t
would indeed be great pleasure for me
TO visit my birthplace and talk to the
folks on the day We celebrate this sweet
liberty we are enjoying at present, but
owing TO a little trouble experienced re
Gently, am keeping inside good share
of the time, my confinement being OF
such nature that will not be at liberty
to speak TO you on that day"
As the Duke OF Wellington was stand
ing, one day. opposite his house in Picca-
dilly, waiting an opportunity to cross the
street, an entire stranger offered his arm
to the duke to assist him in crossing.
Although Wellington hated assistance OF
any kind, he accepted the strangers arm,
and the latter. having secured Passage
by signing to the drivers OF the vehicles
TO stop, conducted the great man In safe
ty across the street. II thank you, sir,
said the duke, releasing his arm and pro-
ceeding TO his house door. But the
stranger, instead OF moving off, raised
his band and delivered himself to the
following eject "yonr grace, have
passed long and uneventful life. but
never did hope TO reach the DAY when
| might be Of the slightest at sisianee to
the the greatest man that ever lived"
''Iop't be a damned fool" responded
the Duke. aud tpIned on his heel