Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-09-09
atjausiae Gatheriags.


b@ We can do more good by being
good than in any other way.
p@ Advice, like water, takes the
form of the vessel it is poured into.
s8- Ii Hung Chang travels with up
ward of 800 trunks and packages.
p9 The ups and downs of life are
better than being down all the time.
r6 The more man possesses perfec-
ton, the less he will possess afecta-
ton.
p@ In Japan, as elsewhere, the male
suicides outnumber the females two to
one.
s6- The Arabs say Eve was 200 feet
high. That's the reason Adam looked
up to her.
p6 Authority is like dried apples.
A few cents worth will puff a small
man up astonishingly.
p@ Some real criminals are to be
found in our churches, but not many
real Christians in our jails.
p6- The little prayer beninning "Now
1 lay me down to Sleep" was written
by John Rogers, the martyr.
s@ A Cincinnati young lady recently
received letter from her best fellow,
which was II feet, s inches long.
s6- An Irish lover remarks that it is
a great comfort to be alone, especial
ly when yer swateheart is wild ye."
s@ We never graduate in religion,
because the nearer we are to God, the
more we see there is to be learned.
p@ Flattery merely consists in hav-
| ing ones secret opinions of ones self
expressed in the language of others.
ipd% In our relative estimate of the
tradesmen's merit we are obliged to
concede the crowning qualities of the
halter.
R6y Personal work for Christ is a
vague expressing. Go and do some
thing for some needy fellow creature.
That is definite.
s@ He-I see the latest idiocy OF
women is to have monkey for pet.
She-This is not new. 1t was 80
when We got married.
sd "Have you BrowningP" she
asked at the village store. "No," re-
piled the clerk; 1--WE have blacking
and whiting, but no browning"
s@ Whenever anything is wrong
ou;t Il and uuit it short off. A good
many want to taper off in sin. They
taper off generally. to the big end.
p6 What can't be cured must be
endured, is a good maxim in its place,
but it is surprising how few ills there
are which time and labor will not set
right.
p6 A child has been killed in Phil
adelphia by being carried on a seat in
front of the handle bars of a bicycle
The risks are too great to warrant this
practice.
s@ "Anything interesting going on
at campmeeting?" eyes; half the
people in camp were mad at the other
half for getting up and singing before
daylight"
s@ If Queen Victoria continues heI
reign till June 20, 1897, she will have
occupied the throne for 60 years.
reign longer than that of any previous
British sovereign.
p@ Belgium, of all nations, has the
greatest density of population, the
largest diversity of occupation, the
most uniform distribution of wealth,
and the minimum of pauperism.
p@ ~ suppose you know all about
the financial question ?" said the init,
mate friend. 81 don't say that know
all about it," replied the candidate,
"but 1 know enough h not to talk about
it,"
t@ A writer of some note has lately
given to the world a very important
decision on the distinction between
couuettes and hirts. The men GO
after coquettes; the fiirts 60 after
men.
p@ Says the Atchison Globe: We
wish a man could preserve joy in cans
like tomatoes, and use it when scarce
When a man does find joy, he usually
finds more than he can use all at
once.
p6 Johnny had been carefully
raised; anybody could see that. One
day he sat upon his fathers knee in q
crowded street car. A lady entered
"Madam," he said, as he rose to bis
feet, stake my seat"
p1 When a father in Madagascar
gets in the notion that his daughter
ought to marry he puts rope around
her neck and leads her forth, and the
first young man he offers her to has
got to take her or pay forfeit.
p@ "John," said Mrs. Norton, as
she seated herself at the hotel break
fast table, "did you call a waiter p
eyes," said Norton, looking up from
his paper, "I called him, and he had
tray full"
p6 The infant of the household was
in its cradle. The head of the house
was at home, peevish and faultinding
At length he became uncomfortable
"You've done nothing but make mis-
takes tonight" he growled. ayes,
she answered, meekly. "I began by
putting the wrong baby to bed"
s~"I wish you would tell me,
said the agent, who had long been or
Mr.. Snaggs's trail, "what is your in
superable objection to insuring your
life p" II don't mind telling you,
replied Snaggs. "The idea of being
more valuable after I am dead thar