The Portland daily press., 1896-01-16

To the Editor of the Press:

u OOuSUfhluou poilbeu6SS, dU nearG envy
and dislike each other, to keep the peace.
No sooner is one cause of internationa
difference-the disputed Venezuelan
boundary observation-disclosures, or on it's
way to a peaceable adjustment, til an
another looms up, and this time it IS
question of diet. Emergencies in tastes
of eating and drinking have always been
a fruitful source of discord, not only be-
tween families. but even between ma.
I'll rs. | nothing are we more intoler-
ant than in reConoiling ourselves to our
neighbours peculiaritles Of eating or
duty of an Englishman might be summed
up in three articles-to fear God; to hon
or the King, and to hate a Frenchman
like the devil. But neither the brave sail
or nor his stalwart countrymen could
ever give a more rational reason for hat
ing his neighbor across the channel than
the imputation against him of an habit
ual diet of frogs.
1t seems that the letters of Matthew
Arnold have just been published with
the usual unpleasantness that follows
the publication of things that were never
meant to Q published. Matthew writing
home to mis- daughters, naturally inter-
ested in suon gossip, tells how the morn
ing after his lecture in Andover, Mass,
he took breakfast there with party of
professors and their wives, where the
menu consisted of ''coffee,, fruit, pota-
toes, fishballs, hashed veal, mince pies,
rolls and butter" OF course the whole
world of Andover knows exactly which
professor entertained the illustrious poet
on this occasion, and which professors
wife was guilty of this abominable COM
bination, at the digestion of which the
apostle of sweetness and Light was
compelled to assist. Accordingly G. II.
in the Boston Transcript-perhaps the
peccant professor himself--oomes out with
an indignant denial that such an incon-
gruons mess was ever served up for
breakfast in any of the high evangelical
circles of Andover, and adds this rebuke
that 1.-THE way in which Mr.. Arnold
speaks of those whose hospitality he ac-
oepted betrays tone of superoilionsness
and makes the impression that he was
under-bred.' THE coffee, fruit and
y, W. Il
the fish balls, hashed veal and mince
pies are Indignantly denied. Such re-
port is SANDER more damaging to An
dover professors than charges of theolOgi-
cal unSoundneSS. and intellectual dis
honestly
1.-THE London Punch some time ago had
a picture which illustrated this text:
portly old lady apparently fond Of the
good things of this life, has been attend
ing the evening conventioles of the san
demanians, or some other irregular sect,
where considerable conviviality had
been mixed up with their devotions.
Her rector meets her and thus severely
takes her to task: "How can you, Mrs.
Cheeseman, countenance by your pres
ence people whose doctrines are so err
roneous" "Erronous," answers Mrs
Cheesenan, their doctrines may be,
but their cake with Sultainey raisins in
it is excellent
This Is just what the sponsors of the
Now ADdover theology say. Erroneous
our doctrines may be-and the fact that
the court never reached decision ON
the merits of that once burning question,
justify them in their modest misgiving-
but we eat well-we don't put fshballs,
veal hash and mince Pie into the same
bill of fare certainly not for breakfast
Fish balls and brown bread, particularly
If it were Sunday morning, might find
a widely extended usage to justify it.
Brown bread and baked beans might vim
dictate themselves on customs "semper,
ubique alb omnibus" at least in New Eng
and. Fishballs to tie followed in sue
ceeding course by buttered griddle cakes
might he en- regle, and might have given
the distinguished guest the opportunity
to handle the unctuous delicacy with his
fingers--a feat he is said to have per-
formed elsewhere-for breakfast tables get
rarnFtod from rhn eide nf host
as that of the guest, though not in pub
lished books. But flshballs. hashed veal
and mlnce pie never, now uere, and by no.
body, except by some disreputable, cheap
railroad restaurator. MInce pie is an
excellent Wand in its way and place.
Our stalwart ancestors were not afraid
of the Nightmares it might engender if
taken too heartily at supper, but all
usage of our time makes 1t a luxury of
the dinner table, and no modern menage,
at which SO dainty guest as MIR. Arnold
would be invited would allow it on the
table Of an eight o'clock breakfast.
Public opinion I feel sure will go
strongly and unanimously with the An
dover professors In this new interna-
tional dispute there will not even be the
small discordant note that broke the har-
mony of our Indignation over encroach-
ments upon the territory of Venezuela
If throwing up fishballs at us in this in
Su1t1ng way leads on 70 our throwing
back cannon balls, such a denouement
can only be prevented by the siauderers
who ate our mince pie now eating as a
suitable sauce for fl their mendacious
words.
Foreign visitors, whom we have enter
tanned and honored. have told US before
that as a people we were vulgar, boastful
and 100 eager in chasing after the evasive
dollar: and we have smiled grimly and
smothered our resentment. But wher
they go so far as TO ''sauca the victuals''
we set before them, we instinctiveIy reach
up for the old continental musket and
tumble its fiintlook to see If 1t will carry
fire. Will Lord Salisbury apologize?
Whatever as people we do OF omit to do,
we do not eat mince pies for breakfast, and
tho man who says we do traduces tho
national taste and. is superoilious and
underbred. But what are all the criti-
cisms of this tGo-much Wanted critic
upon our constitution, our laws, our in
situations, the ideas, ambitions and
aspirations of great people good for,
if he cannot tell the truth about our
breakfasts? Will he not make hopeless
mess of it in depicting the traits of our
national character. as he evidently has
in his slanderous imputation of fshballs,
vcal hash and mince pie to our typical