The herald., 1896-03-30

" UD
"Me an Col. Hotchkiss an Judge DAILY
! as Is farmin' on do Ojai an odder places
fer de railroad, didn't do ting to San Pc
dro,' remarked the deputy zanjero, as he
of his boots the other day. preparatory to
cleansing the pipe in one of the branch
zanias out towards Vernon during the rain
the other day. "De colonel fought he had
de game all fixed against us back in WASH
ington where Mckinley amt to be de boss
water overseer after de fourt of neX'
March. The people as trains wild me was
on to his curves all de time. We let de
old man talk and play statue down in dat
country wild de big guns of de party till he
come away thinkin' piayin' real politics is
as easy as rollin' off a log. Den when de
colonel was called away to see if Bull Run
an de odder places where by himself he
saved de country was still in de same spot,
l winks Alright to Tom Reed am de ting
was done.
"You see it's like dis. De Colonel is fer
Mckinley strongly, an de push is just as
choice, wild Bill Allison de odder farmer
from Ojai-lowa did yuse whisper? Well,
it's all de same country-a close second.
We're fer anything to beat de colonel's
angel. Well, soon rs de old man left
Washington, we told Reed as over eighteen
votes was in our sleeves an dey were
hissn ef he played right an proper. He
laid down right away an told us de colonel
was good enough people out by Covina an
down Santa Barbara way, but ef We was
ready to do business straight, anything as
we wanted was ours. Me an Kotchkiss
an Jack Muir an Billy Arnold an Doc
Campbell amt agin San Pedro. We're fer
de outer harbor like ice cream in May, but
we're fer de long wharf and de Arcadia
Hotel like oyster loaves all de year round.
We're fer San Pedro about ten cents on de
dollar, but we're fer Santa Monica fer a
hundred cents an two per cent paid on de
bill eff we get de proper Extension of time
and fund, all de same de contractors on de
new school houses an John Rebman's job
on de new jail.''
"While de colonel is busy provin' dat
de Snohomish Eye, de Granger Geyser an
de Ojai Tomahawk are fer Mckinley
we'uns is jest a crackin' walnuts an sayin'
nothin', 'cept when it comes to our wide
open primaries next week, when de Eagle
and Mckinley III both get a dose dat III
make 'em hunt Joys fer de Jays as Is
Jaded,' an dat'll keep 'em in der little
beds Till after de big show which is
comm off on de banks of de Mississippi in
ciy' De coioHei ID nixnty Dig man I'll!
II comes to de convention. Den me an
Herv Lindley comes along an takes de
fish off his hook so easy as keepin' Guy
Barham on de police board.
"Talkin' about Barham, de white-livered
trust as buys an sells French sirloips is
still doin business on both sides ov de
railroad track near de Commercial-street
depot. Dat monopoly which buys dia-
monds an silk vests fer Theodore Bauer
an de rest of us good people as is now
playin' de music from de big pipe organ
around de hall here has now been made q
sure 1000 to l shot, de strip of land where
de crop has been short havin', through de
'sistence of John Glass star-eyed goddess
of reform, been reclaimed in time fer har.
vest in de last rain. Me an Bauer am
Jean Reppert ii now farm all de hog
ranch. De chief is all right in de shuttle,
fer de plays been acted to land him dry,
Bob WirschinS, Skinny Long an de ad-
mlnistration a goin' to stand UP an bs
shot at in de mess"
"Where are we goin' to get de $4,000
which is short to build de new Jail? l amt
as yet planned dat ting Alright. But it amt
a worryin' me little bit. When it comes
down to sore eyes, we has money to eat.
Ef Billy Dunn an Freeman G. Teed don't
pull me through dis little defuhculty, den
dey nor me amt de Napoleon's of finance
we is cracked up to be-"
$50 down in my heart, hain't fer Tom
Reed at all. Jack Muir, Collis P. Hunting-
ton an my friend Mike de Young is a spit
knows de fac's straight. Dis feller Lincoln
of Michigan, whose father freed de niggers
an give to de- Mojaves Rocherio Kocha's
land, is my real candidate.
Did yuse say was mixed in my dates?
May be so, but I'm fer de feller from Mich
He's agn eatin' fish on Fridays an de
Irish, an has come out fer banishin' de
nope to de ella dessert wild no one 'xcsptin'
Walter Moore to play casino wild, an moth.
in to eat. 'ceptin' de colonel's morning
paper once day an four times betwixt
courses. Bob Lincoln, or is it what's his
name. Linton? That's my candidate fer
president, de platform bein' "what aire we
heah for 'ceptin' to down de Irish"
keep it low down next yer feet an I'll
let yuse in on secret. I'm sure enough
candidate for superintendent of streets.
My frien' Huntington has sent me a check
for sx-bits to begin de campaign right, an
prayers right, an Herv. Lndley says do.
De colonel sent me word few days ago to
join de Mckinley club or else leave de
lunch counter. | sent back to tell him,
I'm fer joinin' any Republican club. not
bein' however sheep wild Mckinley
brand TO be drove to de mutton slaughter.
Ef course I'm for Reed till it comes de dog
days, den Pm fer Linton or Lincoln what
ever his name is, as is de champion of de
'sociation. When | falls into Perry How
ards shoes next December de boys as
has families. an more den five children
apiece, ii be remembered wild job. I'll
barn my own horse an all my deputies
III have to do similar. De city won't have
to keep corral like de one as razooed de
cash fund an made Grover Cleveland sell
his last lot of gold bonds.
John Drain thinks amt in dis fight, but
de primaries III tell the story. an ef Wal
ter Parker, an Billy Dunn an Jack Muir,
and Coils Huntington, an Reed an Lin
ton turns me down. I'll join de colonel's
staff mex season, an dat push I'll know
who it was dat struck Billy Patterson
"De 'sociation has come out flat-footed
agin de Fiesta. but I'm agin Ed Smith and
old Grubb in dere play. De deal to shut
de fire department outen de big parade
has collapsed, Lou Netter and Grider hay
ing refused to stand up. De city amt CIV
in cent to de show, an de nine, ronnd
de hall here come near declinin' to low
Howartl's gang of trocaderos to 'sist in
decoratin' de streets. Me an freeman
Teed took de bull by de tail an showed |
where 'twould raise hell ef wo didn' play
policy in dis game, an we has had our
way.
80 long. is got to see Walter Parker
bout de police and firemen in de annex
to-yerself district, which has been |
to us. L see youse again.