davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-07-04


"She may look feeble," said the young
man with the pale mustache, bitterly,
"but you ought to see how easily she
can break three-years' engagement
when richer fellow comes alongW
B9" eff we can't talk about our
neighbors' faults, what are we to talk
about ?" remarked the proof reader,
as he glanced at our article on gossip.
"Talk about your own faults" a print
er over the way answered, "and you'll
soon get tired oftalking-that is, ifyou
tell the truth" Doyou see the point :?
r@ A Maine clergyman was talking
to his Sunday school scholars, the
other day, and he expressed the hope
that they would never come down
stairs without first saying their pray
ers. A bright little boy promptly re-
sponded, II sha'n't have to say my
prayers, cause don't sleep up stairs"
p@ "Do you remember" asked the
young lawyer and promoter, "that
you once said would never be rich :?
rather think am on the road to
riches, at least" ~ never said you
would not be rich," answered the
elderly cynic. 81 only said you
would never have any money of your
own, and l still say So"
b~"I wish I could have lived in the
days when men were brave enough to
fight duels for the smiles of women,"
said the girl with the dreamy eyes.
"But they couldn't set up the ice
cream soda in those days, for there
wasn't any," said the girl with the
tilted nose; and the dreamy girl con-
cluded that perhaps the modern times
were best.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-07-04

HIS FLoCK.-A Methodist minister
tried to start a church in Western
town, but from lack of support had to
give up the project. This was the
peroration of his farewell sermon:
"At the last day the Lord will say to
St. Peter, Where is your flock p and
St. Peter will answer Here Lord :
he will say to Calvin, And where are
your sheep?' and Calvin will reply,
Here Lord;' and so all the shepherds
can answer. But when he asks me,
where are your sheep?' how will you
feel when I am compelled to reply,
Lord, I haven't any; mine were all
hogs.'"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-07-04

~ ~ always sleep with pair OF
harness under my bed," said the to-
bacco drummer the other day. "Why
is that" asked the lounger. "Be-
cause" said the drummer. "In case
I should have nightmare, and my
bed should be a little buggy, l would
hitch up and take ride"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-07-04
Well Worth Reading -.
WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES

10 YOU know that it most dinner
i = time, but you do not know what
you'll have for dinner until you get there,
and it is often the case that you are dis.
satisfied with what you find and lay all
the blame on your wife because she "nev-
or has anything fit to eatp' Now there is
no use to treat your wife in any such man
ner; because it's your own fault. The
proper way for you to do is to let your
wife come to my grocery and get whatever
she wants and you will be happy.
Your Wife Will Find
A full and complete stock Of all kinds OF
First Class Groceries and she will be sure
to find what she wants and what will
please your palate.
The Satisfied Man
Is he whobuys his groceries from me. He
can always get satisfactory goods at satis-
factory prices. Quaker Oates is an ex-
cellent breakfast dish.
J. MASON FERGUSON.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-07-04
THE ELECTRoPOIsE

THE following Is list Of ailments tina
l. will yield to judicious treatment with
the ELECTROPOISE. Among the di.
seases mentioned will be found several
that have been cured in persons we'll
known here, who will bear testimony to
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-07-04
TEE wAV no C4ET AN AUTOHARPI
CORBIN DISK HARROWs.

TWO 2disk CORBIN DISK HAIR
i ROWS for sale. They are new and
of the latest improved pattern. Apply to
L. 'WGR1ST.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
OUTLOOK DlscouRAeINe,

Present Condition of the Wooden and
Worsted Industries of This Country.
The Textile Manufacturers Journal
of New York city prints in it's last issue
summary of the returns received from
manufacturers in response to 1900 cir
cular letters sent out inquiring into the
present condition Of the wooden and
worsted industries of this country.
The showing made, the paper says, in.
dicates a condition that is distressful.
While the figures indicate bad con-
dition, the paper adds, they are far
from showing the actual condition, as
many of the mills now in full operation
will be closed down in a short time, q
great many manufacturers preferring
to run full and complete their orders
rather than run on part time.
An analysis of the figures received
shows that in woolens, 256 mills re-
ported, of which 131 are running full;
Ga are closed entirely, and G1 are run
ming Oh fractional time. Out of q total
capacity of 1852 looms, sos are still
in operation. They are running on an
average of 40 hours per week, or SO per
cent. of their full time The full COM
plement of employees for these mills
is given at 42,2s7, of which 27,2o6 are at
present employed. The pay rolls, COM
pared with those of 1892, show an av-
erage reduction Of 1873 per cent.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
RELICS FOR MRS. PlTzEL.
VIII Be shipped When the Law Disposes
of Holmes,


Assistant District Attorney Barlow,
of Philadelphia, the other day an
nounced that all the grewsome relics
that figured in the trial of II. Il. Holmes
for the murder of Benjamin T. Pitzel
will be shipped to Mrs. Pitzel at Galva,
Ill, as soon as the law has finally dis
posed of the murderer. They will in
clude, besides Pitzel's picture, the frag-
mentary remains of the three murdered
children. Mrs. Pitzel within the past
few days requested her counsel here to
arrange for the shipment, so that she
might give decent interment to what
was left of her dead little ones. She
also inquiries if she cannot obtain all
or part of the money taken from her by
Holmes while he was taking her about
the country. This is interesting, in
view of the statement that Holmes has
received a large sum for his alleged con-
fession. Mrs. Pitzcl's counsel would
not state whether any judgment would
be entered against Holmes, but it is be-
lieved nothing will be done. Mrs.
Pitzel also inquiries if steps cannot be
taken to compel Lawyer Jephtha L.
Howe, of st. Louis, Holmes alleged CO.
conspirator in the insurance swinGle,
to return the $1,000 she alleges he OBJ
tanned from her. Her counsel is now
considering just what steps to take in
both these matters.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

The Charles City Citizen figures the
the cost of the plate matter which the
gold gamblers Of Wall street is furn-
'shing to the country newspaper that
will sell themselves to Wall street
Interests for free plate matter at but
$3.50 per week. But this does not
dispose of the question as to whether
that expenditure is for the benefit of
Wall street or the western farmer.
If the Citizen can cite the farmers of
the west to any investment, however
small, made by Wall street without
the expectation of a profit therefrom,
it will fortify Wall street tendencies
and teachings by naming it, We
would not intimate that it is dishon-
est, but ignorance in the Citizen to
ask that the farmers sell three bush
els of wheat for dollar instead of
one, to buy the ''honest dollar" that
Wall street has to sell, insisting as it
does that such transaction is prohta-
BILE to the farmer. The farmer real
ICES that he has to buy dollars with
the product of his labor to pay taxes,
official salaries, annuities, debts pub
lie and private, and that
under the gold standard the quantity
of products to each dollar bought is
twice what it should be. Wheat
corn, rice, beef and mutton of certain
quantity and quality in the economy
of nature has invariably fixed and
certain value in nourishment, and in
sustaining life. Wool and cotton and
the fabrics manufactured from then
of like quality and quantity are uni
Yersally of like value in protecting
man from the inclemencies OF the sea
son. The sole article to which The
Citizen comedies value, gold, has toe
high price. to measure the value o
the articles named. Gold is the one
article whose price, (nos yalue) il
fixed by law, an article which lack
the intrinsic value of the commodi
ties named.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

The address of Hon. s. p. Evans of
Ottumwa, chairman of the state bime
tallic democratic committee, is ener-
getlc, timely and truthful, and it
should be carefully read and con-
sidered by every Jeffersonian in Iowa.
He says:
agents of the money power, in
conju notion with deluded DEM crats
aided by the republican press. are
preparing to capture the Dubuque
convention and make it declare in
favor of the financial policy inaugur-
ated by republicans when silver was
demonetized in 1878, and now contin-
ued at the dictation of Wall street
and foreign syndicates. Three fourths
of the democratic voters of Iowa are
in favor of constitutional money; for
gold and silver as the standard mon
ey of the country, and the coinage Of
both metals without discrimination
against either. They were so last
year when the Marshalltown conven-
tion was captured by the gold power
through federal officeholders and by
fraud and bogus proxies. This cap
ture'was facilitated by the speciousplea
that the money question was not an
issue at that time, and the issue could
be Joined in the presidential year.
The time has now arrived when there
can no longer be such pleas offered.
We must either be for the people, or
against them; for the money of the
constitution, or perpetuate the bond
system that will end in financial
thralldom to Europe.
There would be no doubt as to the
result in Dubuque, if the democratic
voters could be fairly represented and
as they desire to be represented; but
the convention was called at a 'front.'
Ter town in order that democrats from
the interior, the west and south would
be discouraged at the distance to be
travelled and thus fail to attend the
| convention. Federal office-holders
and their under-strappers will pro-
vide free transportation to those who
obtain proxies, pledge themselves to
vote for the gold standard and against
Horace Boies. | warn the friends of
bimetallism to be on their guard and
see that proxies, if obtained at all
should go into the hands of those
who will carry out the wishes of the
people who are to be represented.
The results of county conventions, SO
far, are encouraging in the highest
degree. Nearly every county that
has chosen delegates has instructed
them to vote for the platform upon
which Horace Boies led the democrats
to the only victories they have
achieved during the past forty years
1t is our plain duty to secure fail
representation, and | beseech ever,
democrat to make his last determined
stand for the principles of Jefferson
and Jackson"
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

Tom Watson observes queer thing
about tariff legislation. Tariff laws
have been passed at intervals in this
country for more than a hundred
years, and every one of them has been
for the protection of the American
laborer, and yet that laborer finds it
harder to get work at fair pay now
then ever before. Not one of those
laws has been passed to aid the
wealthy manufacturer, and yet the
manufacturer has grown into bigger
corporations, and produced more mil
lionaires than was ever before known
in this or any other country. That is
little odd, come to think about it.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
Beware of Olntments for Catarrh that
contain Mercury,

as mercury will surely destroy the
sense of smell and completely de-
range the whole system when enter
ing it through the mucous surfaces
Such articles should never be used
except on prescriptions from reput-
able physicians, as the damage they
will do is ten fold to the good you can
possibly derive from them. Halls
Catarrh Cure manufactured by F. j..
Cheney & Co., Toledo, o.. contains
acting directly upon the blood and
mucous surfaces of the system. In
buying Halls Catarrh Cure be sure
you get the genuine. 1t is taken in
ternally, and made in Toledo, Ohio,
by E. J. Cheney & Co. Testimonials
free.
Essold by druggists, price 75c. per
bottle.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
MAY MAKE POTATO WHISKY.
Overproduction Likely to Give Corn an
Energetic Rival.

OVerproductlon Likely to Give Corn an
Energetic Rival.
The enormous overproduction of po-
tatoes last summer will probably re-
suit in the establishment of potato dis
tilleries in Wisconsin, Minnesota and
Michigan, where the tuber can be bought
for five cents bushel or less. Potato
whisky is made and consumed in Ger.
many and Austria, and every traveller in
ireland is offered Sample of "poteen."
Few, except the natives, ever have the
courage to do more than look at it.
However, small quantities of "poteen"
are imported into the United States.
and stuff bearing that name, and prob
ably equally as effective as the genuine,
can be had in every city.
The American distillers have not ex-
perimented much with potatoes. They
say the potato flavor is not relished by
men used to the Kentucky, Maryland,
Pennsylvania or Tennessee article. A
$4,000 plant is being erected at Manawa,
Wis, according to press dispatches, TO
use up part of the surplus crop Of 1895.
The venture is being watched by other
distillers, and if it proves successful
corn will have formidable rival. It is
estimated 297,000,OOO bushels of DO.
tatoes were sold or housedlast year, com
pared with 170,O00,0o0 bushels in 1894.
Many states not specially adapted to
potato raising went into the market,
and as result potatoes are now sell.
ing in Chicago to peddlers at 10 or IA
cents bushel, and choice stock Is go
Ing in small lots at rs cents. 1t is be-
lieved the planting in 1896 will be less
than in 1895, but not in the great potato
states-New York, Pennsylvania, Wis
consin, Minnesota, Michigan, Illinois
and Colorado. If distillers can use po-
tatoes they can always find refuse stock
at low prices as the starch manufac-
turers do.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
Financial Fallacies of M. P. Biwer
of Elma.


In which he seeks to demonstrate
that it is easier to pay that $1,000
mortgage with the Honest S that
buys bushels of oats, than with
the s that buys but bushels. That
it is easier to pay that $1,000 mort
gage with 20 horses than with 10.
His article carries its own refuta-
ton with it. Everybody but him
knows it. He'd better tarry a while
at Jericho to let his beard start.
Farmers ought to tumble to that
kind of racket. Read and reflect
upon its nonsense.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

answer. But remember 1 have not
said all / am going to say. But Unjust
limit myself and if you print and an
swer this we can have q good time
and all your readers will enjoy it. /
mean to be truthful and will give any
authority you may question.
Yours truly,
NJ. P. BIwER.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
The Kaiser,s Malformed Arm.

The story that the kaiser's mall
formed left arm has been diagnosed by
the Roentgen process and that surgeons
by this help will now be able to re-
store it's usefulness is very pretty, but
will hardly hold water, says the New
York Times. The limb in question has
no bones worth talking about, and it is
incredible thatany structural operation
can bring vigor into member which
has been withered and lifeless for 80
wears.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
HE TlckLED INGALLS, NECK.
John Curtis Sent to an Asylum for Unique
REASON.

Reason.
John Curtis langrishes in the insane
asylum at Topeka, Kan, because he
tickled ex-senator Ingalls, on the back
Of the neck. Ingalls, was stalking down
Atchison street in deep meditation.
when Curtis slipped up behind him and
ticliled him on the neck. The ex-sen-
ator turned on him in rage and de-
manded to know why he should be SUBJ
jected to this indignity on the public
thoroughfare. The probate Judge toole
notice of the incident, and, after an ex-
animation, decided that Curtis would
not have done such thing il in his
right mind, and sent him to the asylum.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

Tom Watson says if we never have
free silver until one of the old parties
gives it, free silver and Gabriel's
trumpet will come together.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
Flathead Valley. Montana.

crops without irrigation. Forests of pine,
fir and cedar. Mines of precious metals and
coal. Delightful and healthful climate Adapt
supply and power. No extremes of tempera-
ture. Market facilities. Homes for all. For
further information, address q. L. CONRAD,
KalSpell, Mont.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
"Wilere Are We Az"

THIS question perpeNes the whole business
world. People Interested in the Northwest
can find where they are at by consulting an at
las containing fire up TO date maps and much
valuable reference and descriptive matter: sent
TO any address Tor 10 cents in stamps by F. l.
WHITNEY. G: +. II. A., Great Northern Rail-
way, st, Paul, Mimi,
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
Farms on the CrOp Plan.

no you want to buy lands in the far-famed
~ grnin-growing district OF the Red River
Valley OF North Dakota. Remember they are
get particulars. We can sell you farm and
take pay from share of the crop.
GRANDIN & EDWARDS, Mayviile, N. D.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
Notice of Building Contract.

Notice is hereby given that on the 4th day of
May 1896, at O'Clock p. m, at Lourdes How
ard county, Iowa, bids VIII be opened for the
contract of building School house in District
No. /, of Paris township, Howard county, Iowa,
Secretarys Office Contractors must furnish
bonds subject to approval of Board of Directors
and the board reserves the right to reject any
and all bids, MARTIN p, LYDON.
t-a-w to may Secretary
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
A Business Proposition.

THE owners OF large body eff land on Wild
by island. in Puget Sound, WASH, will d.
vide 1t into tracts to suit buyers and sell at $40
and upwards per acre. on long time, and no
payments the first year. Produces all stable
crops; has close markets; schools and churches;
J, 200 population; mild climate. For further In
formation address r. E. WERKMAN, Seattle,
Wash
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
business Chances.

INDUCEMENTS offered to men with capital
and experience to bulld and operate flour
mills, oatmeal mills, feed mills, flax mills, paper
mills, starch factories and creameries in new
towns on the Great Northern Railway in the
Northwest. Address A. A, WHITE 1920 Pioneer
Press Building, st. Paul, MINI.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

The farmers have burnt their fin
gers raking gold bug chestnuts out of
the fire about long enough. They may
now very profitably do little roast
ing on their own account,
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

There are no more reasons why cor
porations and individuals should is
sue paper money than there is that
they should coin metal money.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

Thomas Jefferson said: Blanks are
more dangerous to the liberties of the
people than standing armies" Is it
not true Jeffersonian Democrats?
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

The prices of labor and it's products
are held down by the gold standard;
the prices of what labor must buy
are held up by the trusts.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
According to Greeley:

"GO West - But before you go, write
4. A. G. N. Ry.. st. Paul, Mimi, for printed
matter descriptive of the Northwest country,
which Offers so many inducements to new set
ierS and investors.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
His Motto.

"Mrs. Hobbs, my motto is say moth
ing and saw wood.'"
"Then why do you getso mad whenever
I ask you to split little kindling ?"-
Chicago Record.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

Why don't you use our clear quill
corn and laundry starch, at five cents,
it is all right
Caward, the Grocer.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01

Try a can of Hopkins Hominy
Hulled Corn). 1t is delicious. Full
quart, 10 cents.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
"77" for GRIP.

Sold by Druggsts prepaid receipt of price,
c for $780, may be assorted except Nos 49, % and
81, put up in e. 90 size only.
Dr. HuMPHREYs NJ Revised MAlLEprREn
HUMPHREYS MED. co., III s. William ST., New York.
Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-05-01
A Democratic Appeal.

The address of Hon. s. p. Evans of
Ottumwa, chairman of the state bime-
tallic democratic committee, is ener-
getlc, timely and truthful, and it
should be carefully read and CON
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1896-08-29
COUNTY NOTICES.

NOTICE TO TAxPAYERs-NoT IS
hereby given taat the King county
board OF equalization VIII pc in session
three (gD weeks. commencing Monday.
August 3. A. y. IsS al the King county
rourf house. for the purpose OF equaliz-
fnE the tax roll OF 1855. All taxpayers
clagrning abatement OF tax are hereby
nofIfed 10 appear or. or before Saturday,
August % isSs, or be forever barred.
NATHAN BENA%
County Auditor and Ex-OHicio Clerk OF the
P9erd OF County Commissioners OF
Kin1 County. Wash.
Datea az Seattle. this nth day OF July.
n fFaS
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1896-08-29

Tne public e hereby warned rot 70 pay
any rsaoney 70 Parties representing 20 %
agents Of the .eottie Ppst-lHtelg zsnCer.
except the following. whe are ne oflr
authnyfzrd travelling agents 81 tre Port
Iats!ls.enccr. viz J. A. 1eCs-i.sn. J. ].
HnwIey and g IL. Peek. Tf.fs aos1 not
oypsy 70 resident gents % tbs paper 700
the Northwest nor 10 sogt.sss 5fefs. WHO
are r. all cases autsorixcd 70 take SUD
seripfIons for the Daily. SUNDAY ana
<rs. i rsshcs-. n T aawiey. w.
~. Hanna ana ". ". Ewiny.
The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1896-08-29
THE VANCOUVER ROUTE.


Leaves Tacoma. noon. Seattle. Yesler
wharf p m. Mondays and THURSDAYS
for Port Townsend. Anacortes. Falrhaven,
New W stccm. Blame and Friday Har-
Jcr and vancouver. arriving Vancouver
?. N following dey
Fare n Blaine 81. fare 20 Vancouver
q Fs- further information apply TO Yes
.ey yaArs.