Herald and news. [volume] (West Randolph, Vt.) 1878-1943, 1896-07-16
He Was a Society Man.


Though not in any sense addicted to al
Incorporate indulgence in church soci
ables, afternoon teas and other forms o
social dissipation, he was, nevertheless
a society man OF the most pronounced
type.
Being OF the opinion that il King Solo
mon could ride goat he could, he frs
started out on his memorable career b.
joining the Masons, being more particu
iarly persuaded to the step by the reflec
tion that when travelling, Masons are al
ways treated with more than the usua
amount OF courtesy and in case OF ship
wreck or collision are always rescued first
while the uninitlated are left to hunt w
their own life. preservers.
AS he seemed uncommonly alive to thu
advantages Of the fraternity and was very
prompt in the matter of dues, be rose al
rapidly as the thermometer on July day
until he registered nobody knows how
many degrees in the shade and was pos.
sessed OF as many aprons as hotel table
girl.
He placed mortgage on his house In
order to raise funds for the purchase of 9
cooked hat with long white feather on
1t and sword with damascus blade, and
then nearly cut himself in two trying to
learn how to use that instrument OF war.
fare. His wife took in sewing to pay the
interest on the mortgage, and longed tor
knight Templar funeral that she might
see how John looked in his regimentals.
He developed perfect mania for socie-
ties, embraced Odd Fellowship with fer.
vor and would have embraced christianity
II there had only been secret to it.
He became member of the Mystic
Shrine and found 1t necessary frequently
to traverse the arid wastes OF Vermont on
"pilgrimages" to various towns on impor.
tant business connected with the order,
the sole drawback to his enjoyment in
these trips being the fact that he had to
''cross the desert" by train instead OF by
means OF the more appropriate two
bumped camel, which travelling circus
refused to sell him.
In the meantime, he added another
mortgage to the house, instead Of bay
window, and his wife took in more sew
ing. But ne sported longer line OF CAPT.
tails after his name than college presi-
dent, and his children learned their let
ters from studying the envelopes addressed
to their distinguished pa in his official ca
pacities.
: Finally be became interested in the no.
BILE order OF Red Men and was elected to
be chief sagwa OF Catamount Tribe, No. 6.
AT this juncture, he gave up all business
in order TO have time enough to devote to
the study OF the dialect OF his tribe, and
began to Use such peculiar phrases In or
binary conversation that some OF the
neighbors thought he was out OF his head.
4 Incidentally, his wife took the children
out OF school and put them TO work in a
mill; the holder OF the first mortgage on
the house foreclosed, and he received a
dunning letter from every one OF his So
,ieties, asking for unpaid dues.
In the midst OF this delightful state OF
affairs, he was stricken with mortal sick
ness and, despite the best OF care and
nursing, died, leaving family not only
destitute but burdened with debt.
But his funeral paid for everything. 1t
asted pretty much all one afternoon, as
10 many rituals had to be said, and the
required an hour to pass Civ
IN point, which was great comfort to
he widow and children in their affection
ind sore distress.