The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1896-08-16
ETIQUETTE OF THE DIVORCE.
Points Which Ought to he Understood
in the Army of the Separated.

in the Army of the Separated.
New York Post. &"
SO thoroughly are we becoming accus-
toned to the new regime that very little
attention is paid TO il. The newspapers still
make a sensation out of divorce cases, but
they know that society takes them with
perfect equanimity; they make as much as
they can. too, out of marriages.. or. for that
matter. out Of any event. Even the funny
man devotes little space to divorce, though
one would think it furnished promising
game for him. In France the dramatists
made one or two extremely amusing plays
out of it. which have gone all over the
world; but it is marriage which our wit
still takes for its butt; IL is over the moth
er-in-law and the husbands relations with
her. at the married mans late hours and
difficulty with his latch key and bootjack,
at the curtain lectures that they still make
merry-just as If divorce were still too
serious a subject to jest about. Even prac-
teal jokes about 1t are not taken in good
part, though everyone knows better than
to look glum IL he is laughed at for having
married: he. expects tne news of his divorce
to be treated, at least in his presence. with
solemnity. Considering the commonness of
divorces, there Is something rather per-
picking to us about this. Some years ago
a number of people of both sexes invited to
a dinner discovered, on being assembled
around the festive board, that the only
thing they had in common was that they
had all been divorced. A capital joke, the
hostess thought, and so it will nc doubt
one day seem to the guests-much better
than the JeJune BOBBY trap. or the practice
of putting crumbs in the guests bed. But
the guests took ii in bad part. as if their
feelings had been hurt and good taste out
ragged. Their feelings had been hurt. There
Is still ii lingering feeling that divorce
should not be alluded to in the presence of
the divorced. But this must soon die out.
About other points connected with di-
vorce there is still some obscurity, custom
not yet having established a rule. 1t would
be convenient, for instance, TO know in all
cases what to call a divorced lady. At
present she seems TO call herself what she
pleases. Her name is no necessary indica-
tion of her status. In the case of a man
there is no difficulty. We identify him by
his name, and If in doubt as to his status
we simply ask: Whose wife did he mar
rye" But in the case of a lady there is
some arkwardnesS in asking either What
name does she go by now?' or What was
her name last year?' But after all we
must not make too much of these diff
culties. We annot have perfect freedom
and all the convenience of fixed family re-
lations at the same time. ON the other
hand, a nice point now said to be well set
tied Is that in divorce proceedings the gem
teman yields the pas to the lady. When a
divorce is, as is now more and more usual
voluntary the lady Institutes the proceed
ings and the husband confesses in his an
swer almost any charge she may choose to
make against him. Times change and
manners with them. The collision and
fraud or one age become the marks of true
~politenesS in the next.