Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1896-12-03
"l1Y ENGAGEMENTS


1t is unfortunate that those VINO
seem most powerfully impressed WITH
the sacredness of marriage are just
those who appear to forget that an
engagement is a prelude to union
that is intended to last for life; for
surely no one who did fully realize
that fact would tolerate the usual
easy going fashion of forming matri-
monlal alliances. Did one not know
to the contrary, one might have sup
posed that our customs of betrothal
had grown up as the attendant evil of
an easy system of divorce, instead OF
being the accompaniment to a mar
riage system wherein union is prac
tically irrevocable. Nothing short Of
the utmost facility of divorce, with
out penalty legal or social, would &C
count for those customs having grown
up. They suggest the idea that the
mischief which may be done in haste
may be repaired no less quickly;
whereas, the error has to be expiated
through whole life, and by many
persons, and could not be wholly
avoided even were Ii as easy to OBJ
tain divorce as it is to get married.
Does 1t not stand to reason that ali
engagement on which the whole life
Of at least two persons depends Should
not be finally made until every oppor-
tInity has been enjoyed for seeing
possible dangers of disagreement,
unhappness and, what is even more
important, of evil effects upon char
aeter which one person may so easily
have upon another? This is to put
the perils at the lowest; for out of
every home. which is world in mill,
iature, proceeds a definite and often
powerful stream of influence; and
what the influence is to be must be
determined by that most delicate and
subtle interaction OF character aud
temperament which is produced by the
daily and hourly companionship OF
two different minds All this Is. now
ever, ignored by our present customs
In other words, by the great majority
of our contemporaries, who. nRverthe-
less, sincerely believe that they hold
the institution of marriage in great
esteem; nay, who regard it with the
same wholesale enthusiasm which in
spired the patriotic British sailor re
garding his country when he knocked
down an Italian who presumed to
speak disrespectfulls of English tenor
voices.
Let the laws Of marriage be VIVA.
they will, betrothal ought never be
entered into or SO much as thought OF
till after lorg friendship: and it
should be a point of honor not only to
refrain from demanding a binding
promise to be made. Betrothal should
imply, not promise to marry, but a
promise to consider the posi- bility OF
marrying this or that person. after an
opportunity has been enjoyed OF form
ing reasonable judgment.
HammeTton, the author Of THE In
tellectual Life" says on this subject
If the reader has ever had travel
ing companion. some person totally
unsuited to his nature, and quite UNI
able to enter into the ideas that chiefly
interest him. unable to see even the
things that he sees, and always ready
to treat negligently or contemptuously
the thoughts and preferences that are
most his own, he will have some faint
conception OF what 1t must be to lind
oneself tied to an unsuitable compan-
ion for the tedious journey Of this
mortal life; and ii, on the other nand,
he has ever enjoyed the pleasure OF
wandering through country that in
terested him, along with a friend who
could understand his interest and
share 1t, and whose society enhanced
the charm Of every prospect, and
banished dullness from the dreariest
inns, he may, in some poor and imper-
feet degree. realize the happiness OF
those who have chosen the life com
panion wisely 4
In short. unless more than ordinary
precautions are taken, the matri-
monial aspjrant Is apt to land himself
In a predicament more serious thar
that Of the horse dealer referred TO ii
an article in a number Of the Corn
hi, Magazine Of 1866, who Is warnes
that no rnifSx 10 very wlde-awAEn IN