The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-05-10

c1ufuselly came to my ear. You know
how ueru.eXlug DO is when you cannot see
me perscnases upon the stage. when you
cannot note their gestures, uor The play of
their faces. Bun che nrsr acl terminated
amid r0ars Of applause 4 man ] knew,
three seats % mT right. was shaking with
laughter Everybody iu the rlearer seem
eli OBJ De- Intensely amused 40 the play. eN-
cepr myself And The blonde lady would
sun turn from time % time and favor me
with lcr Sueering smile
seated Immediately I'M 'front.' OF the blonde
lady was q very small man VINO looked
Ike Luuclhack. his head was so suuken
between his shoulders I looked al him
carefully he had the appearance Of be-
Ing a deadhead. owing % his rather shah
ana asked MIN u be would 90 our with me
between the acts for a few minutes. When
We were outside I said 10 him:
Ny dear sir. j have particular in
terest iu occupying your chair. No. As III
you VIII pardon the liberty take. I would
Ike 10 give you this tribe. q slipped a s.
NoHi4 IKE 70 nave your seat and you
may have mine. No. o.
The little mans face lighted up with
pleasure. He slipped my s. piece into
his walstcOat pocket and said. Certain
ly, my dear sir You are very good. 7
VIII take your seat with pleasure"
Thus I was placed ia possession OF seat
g. NOW / could see the stage, but stlll
i was not reVenged. Ny first idea was
90 install myself there. wearing my own
high nat. but / reflected that this mani
seem liScourteOus 10 the actors, and that
] would De forced 10 take ii of Sud-
denly an idea flashed across my mind
an Inspiration. / left the theater and
walking block or two until I came to
mlllners shop. / entered and demand
cd OF the saleswoman TO sell me q hat
the most gigantic, the most arborifer0us
the most pyramidal hat she had. She
opened drawer and exhibited TO me a
monument .n black felt, with an enormous
Knob or black velvet upon its TOD. and
on top of the black velvet knob d puff
or black flowers, extremely high. With
out laggling, paid her the price and
swiftly returned 10 the theater.
To the stupeiactlOn Of Cmythe. who
was still seated in his chair. No. 80, ] seat
ed myself in No. As. Immediately before
the blonde lady with the big hat and
then, with perfectly serious countenance
] placed upon my head the black velvet
ornament. i do not know what sort of a
figure cut with my long moustaches un-
der the velvet hat, but II a bomb had
burst in the orchestra IL would not have
produced greater effect Explanations
came from every direction, and people
roars of laughter
The men-poOr wretches. they do stand
together once in awhile understood the
motive of my protest. and cried: "Bravot
Bravoi lie is rightr' while tho apitated
Cmythe screamed TO me across the blonde
ladys balloon sleeves. why, old man.
remained impassive in the midst of the
tempest which / had let loose But the
usual reverse came. Two ushers. after
consultation, came to me and politely
begged me to axe off nay hat Certain
ly,' said /, III you will make this lady
take on hers. This response provoked
the utmost enthusiasm from the men
But the ushers would not listen to reason
and they made me leave my seat
The lady with the vegetable garden tri-
umphed, but not for long.
Looking up toward The family circle
] saw "a cOlored damsel wearing a small
turban. I mounted to the circle. / went
TO the cOlored lady. Pardon me" said
], but / have a hat which cost me SIS
only a quarter of an hour ago." / ex-
h-bited the black velvet monument and
the colored ladys eyes bulged out in
amazement and admiration.
And what about it2' she said.
Nothing but this; il is yours if you
VIII do me the favor TO occupy nv seat
in the orchestra, No. As, until the plav is
over"
In a second she swept off the little
turban she Wore placed the black velvet
monument upon her head, gave fl two or
three taps before the mirror in the lob
by, shook out her skirts, and then taking
my arm, l conducted her to orchestra
chair No. As
Oh, if you had only seen the convuIsive
JOY among the men in the orchestra when
they saw my monumental hat reappear
upon feminine head. This time the
ushers had nothing to say. The Iadv
with the vegetable garden was vanouish-
ed. She could see nothing during the rest
OF the piece, and served as a focus for
opera glasses from all over the house
AT last was reVenged