Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-09-05

trio light.
"Hi, there!" yelled the phono.
graph "get move on you now-yi
vi! yil" whereupon the boy was con-
vinced he was being pursued by lu-
natic, and fed down a side street.
"Barker," said I solemnly, pushing
my wheel up alongside of him by a
tremendous effort, ''you had better
take that thing off,"
"Why, how do you do?" said he !;
stake it off! Why?"
because / am morally certain" !"
said I, "that it's a violation of Ordi-
nance No. 5046. If one of those
mounted policemen comes along and
that thing howls at him, you'll 60 to
jail"
But Barker evidently thought that
was all nonsense. He didn't care if it
violated the whole council series from
A to lizard. He had got hold of an
elegant thing, and was going to stick
to it, and I was gay sort of man to
recommend it to him and then advise
him to give it up. All this time the
phonograph was talking in tone of
deep disgust to heavy individual
who was pedalling along, in leisurely
way just in front of us, and who must
have been stone deaf, or he would GER
tainly have clambered downed and
punched Barker's head.
Then was initiated into the mys-
teries of the things, and saw how, by
pushing small attachment down so
that it rubbed on the front of the
wheel, the mechanism of the phono-
graph was made to revolve, and it
shouted out whatever was in it until
the clamp was released. Barker said he
had talked into it half a day, and it
was evidently we'll supplied with a
vocabulary.
By the time we got to the club-for
we belong to a club-Barker was in a
state of hilarious delight, and half the
dogs, children and old ladies in town
were on the verge of frenzy. Of
course, all the other fellows in the
club had to learn about it, and Barker
pushed his machine around on the
sidewalk and made the phonograph
curse them and all their relatives to
the tenth generation, which seemed to
afford them the most unbounded pleas
ure.
As fitting conclusion to the even
ing's entertainment, we all went up
stairs, and regret to say that Barker,
after placing the phonograph carefully
on table beside him, got as drunk as
a lord, and talked and sang and shout
ed in very scandalous and disgrace
full way.
After it was all over, I took him
home and put him to bed, and while
doing this he informed me in maud
lin and disconnected way that be was
going out riding the next evening
with the two Cutter girls, daughters
of old man Coupon Cutter, one of the
directors in the bank, and he wished l
would happen to drop around and ride
with the big one, so he could talk to
the little one. He said that I was his
only friend, and that he loved the lit
tie one. He did not love her in any
ordinary way, either; but in way in
which no one had ever loved before.
Now, like Barker, and he is q
friend of mine, and as a matter OF
course it was only common charity to
help him out of q case like that. So
1 gave him lot of good advice how
to doctor his head in the morning,
which he received with very bad
grace, and promised to be in the neigh
borhood of old Cutters the next even
ing without fail.
was little late in getting off, and
had hardly got within sight of the
house on the following night when 1
met the two girls and Barker coming
toward me. He seemed to be in high
spirits and particularly jolly when
they met me. I wanted to ask him
about the phonograph, but hesitated
to do 80 He Immediately mentioned
the matter himself, however, and ex.
planned that the youngest Miss Cutter
was infatuated with the thing, and had
insisted on having it put on her bicycle,
and that they were so anxiously wait
ing for something to get in the way
so they could give it trial. l after
wards discovered that Barker had
represented 1T to them that the whole
thing was his own idea, and they had
declared that he was wonderfully in
geuious.
We had gone about three blocks,
Barker and "the little one" being in
front, and the elder Miss Cutter and
myself in the rear, when a man tried
to cross the street in front of us.
"Hooray! gimme another drink !"
said the phonograph, in ghastly
counterfeit of Barker's voice.
The man 'gazed at us in astonish-
ment, and fell into the gutter. Bar.
ker's machine wobbled violently, and
could see that his nerve had crum-
bled, while 1 felt shiver along my
own spine as I took in the situation.
"Her golden hair was hanging down
her h-h-hic-back % sang the
wretched instrument, in Barker's well
known treble. Evidently the "little