Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-11-19
THE NISEIET IN A SA7E

THE MISCHIEF N A SAFE
The safe proved to be full of sur
prises and made trouble from the start
Tre man who bought il lives in New
York ana goes 10 Brooklyn to sleep.
Tat story oil the sale goes back to the
GAYS when p. has q visitor ~ MS Oh
ice whose tongue was huns on the
principle of Teslas ner electrical os-
Cfuator which viLIates a surprlslns
number of times ia q second. The vl;-
ir.r had safes to sell. and. when the
c.l.Zen said lc wouldn't buy one l"Ih-
cd on the current net ran mis- tongue.
Straightway the CGce was filled win
q bu-zus Nilrc.ne, penetrating eAecI
that made the uW ietOr whirl about
ia his chair and clap his hands over
lis ears. The general pUrpOrt OF the
disturbance was 10 the effect that the
citizen did want 10 buy a safe, whether
DE thought so or not: that il he dldn [
need one for his office he'd better set
one for his house. and not have all
his silverware and valuables stoIeh'
and that he'd never have a better op-
portunity of buying safe in ms lie
than right lt the moment
.TU think about it, he said weakly.
s.No Won won't think about il, the
buzzine ret0rred vigorously and at
much greater length. III You want d
safe ar an. YOU want 10 right now.
Your vaIuables may De stolen at any
moment and then it Will be too late
to think about il. HOw's this style!
list price. $50 Fifty of. Let you
nave il at SIS What color VIII you
have il ualnted2 Delivered free TO any
part of New York or Brooklyn.
Am this is important as showing thaJ
r. was not the mans fault that he
bought the safe. and consequently ms
after troubles were not deserved. Inc
SURPRISES began as soon as he reached
D s. house i'm Brooklyn after the arrival
of the safe His wife met MN Dealn-
@Oh. dear" she cried. the safes
here. and it's perfectly grand. we
certainly must get those Sl0O curtains
now. if we are going TO live up TO the
safe
But this was only a passing cloud.
He felt a thrill of joyful pride when ne
saw The safe and heard all about II
from his wife. To reached the house
I'm the afternoon while he was at bus
mess. and the duty of receiving 1t 1ell
nnon his wife alone and almost proved
roo much for her. That was largely
because the safe seemed so huge and
so identified as iL sat in majesty upon
the truck that brought IT.
THAT thing doesn't come INTO my
bogsai" she exclaimed Indignantly
when the servant girl rushed up into
her room with the news that a process
SION had stopped i'm front of the house,
and showed it 90 her from the WINDOW
"It's biz enough for a pawn shop. Let
HIM leave it in the front yard, II ne
wants TO.
Undoubtedly the escort made the safe
s..m moro formidable than it was IN
reality. THE escort included two big. iat'
iouy Psrcherous. % truck with wind
lass a complete outfit of ropes and tackle
and sk.ds and, dcrricks, two red signs
with the warning. Danger on them IN
tf- letters. a stout man who bossed the
.,h and TWO assistants inn check Jumpers
who iolGed the servants. 1t caused a. COM
motion ir The ueighborhood and collected
"a crowd I'm front of the house. Altogether
i- WAS enough 10 rouse the ire OF any
housewife Eut there may be some al
frftv between handling safes aud hand
ling women. for the man who was noSSlhF
the lob seemed to have as little diihculty
ir r,oyire the one ass iu cljoIing the other.
Tie tod her what a nice safe it was. and
,.rpad her apprtheusious hy assuring her
bat it would not really be necessary 10
Take the front val of the house down in
order to eet the safe in. by the time the
assistants had regej up derrick and
.rraueed their skids and their tackle she
NILS able -o contemplate the safe with
more kindly feelings. Then the men got
the rnire into the house after nearly TAX
ing the front door or it's hinges, denting
tr.. faf rack and smashing the globe OF the
ham lamp. This damage was SO much less
than tho devastation she had expected
chat she felt positive gratitude to the sale
when it was iu position at last.
.I don't know how We have got along
without it..' She remarked
THE safe certainly had it's good points
outVarIIv whatever it's moral failings as
demonstrated by subsequent events. lt
was big hand painted i'm white picked out
with fine gold lines. and had it's proprie-
tors name upon 10 iu gold letters. lt was
fitted with combination lock. over which
YOU could spend q quarter of an hour
rroftabrv whenever YOU wanted 20 open
the door. Iu order 90 prevent mistakes.
the PROPRIETOR explained the combination
to his wife and bis servant and showed
them how t0 work it. AS further pre-
canton he wrote 10 ont in large figures