The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1896-11-27
ERRORS.
Recorder.

Errors in matters which either are
history, or one day will be such, are
grievously common. Men who ought
to know better make most remarkable
statements about things, and then
wonder at the derision .hey excite.
For instance, at one of the noon-day
| political meetings a hectic gentleman
who seemed to be right in the conf
dence of great many great men, and
who told about them with rapid-fire
speech, took up the question of the
United States army, and declared that
it isn't anything like the army of Valley
Forge and Bunker Hill, but that it has
dwindled to a sort of select dancing
club in blue clothes. He suggested that
there are no campaigns any more. He
alluded to certain occasions when he
charged that the army had set out to
conquer two dollars worth of coffee
cooling Indians and had spent $12,O0O,-
600 in doing it, the chief result being to
give several regiments outing vaca-
lions in good trout countries. The
speaker kept on at this rate and was
applauded right along. Intoxicated by
the success of his generalities, he COM
nnitted the error of particularization. He
declared that, "for instance, the recent
alleged outbreak in Jackson's Hole was
o. war without bloodshed, in which no
man was injured or rendered uncom-
Portable"
This is great error, as can readily
be proved by consulting with William
| MV. sc,o yI1r,
lives in once-booming town, where he
sold real estate in an addition called
Halcyon Heights-a poetic place, with
briclyard in it and great future and
big cornfield before it. Mr.. Crary is
man who is always out after experience,
and when the first intimation came
from Jackson's Hole that there was a
chance for an aspiring coroner up that
way, he decided to go out and look
at the killing and get some souvenirs.
| He arrived in Rexburg with a deter
mination to sell his life as dearly as pos
sible, and to get good assortment of
| kodak pictures in furtherance of the
| transaction.
! At Rexburg appeared one Lewis, an
elector in the precinct, who represent
| ed that the horse he offered for sale was
| kind and gentle, and also rapid. Crary
| had. bought his fare in the stage, but
| the opportunity to purchase horse
! might not present itself later, SO he
bundled his cargo upon the vehicle,
| and, with the assurance that he would
| tell Gen. Coppinger, who was some
where over near the foothills-that
stagefnl of lieutenants was coming, he
started away gayly.
Now, the plain facts of it are that
| Lewis was a ferocious liar. The horse
was one Of those big-boned, pan-foot-
ed beasts which, three minutes after be-
! ing mounted, resolve themselves each
/ into one vastridge pole, and which shove
/ along at foundering motion which
shakes mans boots off unless he is
! wary and experienced. These animals
| churn, pound, bruise and stupefy the
/ rider in half the time required by the
elephant to accomplish similar pur
pose. Mr.. Crary lasted three miles, and
when the stage drew up he mournfully
| declared that his spirited animal had
thrown him and he had sprained his
ankle. The beast had done nothing of,
the kind, but Crary knew his men.
|
| ton among those four lieutenants.
who, detached from their commands,
were now en- route to join them. Every
| one of them wanted to win glory by
| conquering the maddened steed of the
Idaho desert. Naseby, of Angel island.
won. and the other three disgustedly
settled back to lie to one another about
! the experiences in horsebreaking which
they had had since leaving the Point.
| Naseby rushed on ahead. and in min
| ute or two was out of sight. while Crary,
in a semi-recumbent attitude in Nase
! by's seat, wondered what the army man
would do to get out of it. He found on
| in IS minutes AT the next turn in the
trail they found Naseby lying in
swoon beside the way. the vicious an
imal standing near. The proper re-
storatives brought the false Naseby out
of his fraudulent faint, and he re-
lated with great circumstance how the
horse had bolted and had leaped an ir-
rigation ditch 40 feet broad. had waltzed
all over the neighboring country, and
had finally stood straight up in the air
on one hind leg. and, reaching around
rearward with the other, had kicked
Naseby in the small of the back until he
felt life oozing out of him.
In a delirium of delight the other
officers insisted that Nassby didn't
know how to ride anything more vio-
lent than Greek fishing slziff on the
Sacramento river, and they insisted on
showing him how the thing should be
done. Grissette, coming from Fort
Robinson, obtained the great favor of
the next mount. and as the remaining
two soldier men yelled encouragement
and directions at him Naseby under his
breath begged Crary to keep still about
the horrible truth of the horrible beast.
"It is an honor" he said. Ito be
was the time when the buds were burst
ing and the swallows had just returned.