The San Francisco call., 1896-02-02
She Tells Them Just What to
Do to Hold Their Hus-
bands.
MAKE THEM sELF-sATIsFIED.
The Head of the House Should Also
Be Developed Into Creature
of Habit. Z

NEW YORK, N. Y, Jan. 28.-I heard q
clever woman give as her idea of the best
method of holding man this answer:
MAKE him creature of habit" Do you
know how much truth there is in that ?
If you are in doubt about a man try it.
Get him in the habit of sitting in certain
chair. and he finds most others uncom-
fortable get him in the habit of seeing
your face smiling at him across the din
ner table, and he is rather upset when he
is opposite another woman. That woman
who understood man who had loved
many women, that woman who was
neither young nor beautiful, Nine. de
Maintenon, said of Louis XIV: HE
is used to every chair in my room, and
II their places were changed it would
annoy him. He is used to walking GER
tain distance every evening to see me, and
to go further or less would be trouble to
him. know the things that please him,
the food he likes, l know what annoys
him, l know the people who are pleasant
ana those who are unpleasant to him, and
l never contradict him unless / feel that
he IS In remarkably good health and
anxious to impress upon me how much
more he knows than do. Then start q
little discussion, but in it / never give
hint OF the. great knowledge possess. /
permit him to come out conqueror and he
forgives me and loves me all the more be-
cause OF my seeming ignorance. After
man has passed 40, the woman he loves is
the woman he is used TO-" / wonder if
this is true2 l am tempted to believe it.
Did you ever realize the value of magic
words-words that will bring you blessings
or words that will result in your suffer-
lngi Words that you could utter to your
friends and words that said to your enc
mics will bring all sorts of trouble upon
them? Of course, the most important of
all words is "abracadabra.' This, written
on bit OF parchment and put in silk
bag, worn about the neck, will drive away
all evil spirits and bring good health to
you. Could this have been the begin
ming OF the scapular2 People who were
very wealthy got precious stones o.
bits OF gold and had this mystic word
written upon each and then the pre-
cious bit was covered with golden case,
not unlike locket, and swung on a string
OF pearls, gold or of diamonds, as ones
desire or purse permitted. By the by,
this was the name Cagliostro gave to his
favorite horse. If you have the ehills (and
oh is there anything worse than a chill,
unless it IS the fever that comes after il? p
then have ''Abracalan" written on your
parchment, and the cbills will disappear
as rapidly as your monthly allowance. 1t
appears, according tc history, that there is
certain amount of sex in these words, for
what cures a bad headache, fainting
spell or indigestion in a man will do no
good whatever to woman. For these ills
man should have, either on the parch-
ment in his bag or on his shirt cuff, or, in
deed. wherever it is most convenient, the
word "AnamZaptas," while a young
woman with leaning toward headaches
and these other ills requires .Anam-
zapta."
For general use around the house, when
the kitchen lady is insubordinate and the
children all show symptoms of getting
the measles, the word "Ag1a" is handy.
1t wouldn't be bad idea for the people
who have discovered its good qualities to
have it painted on stiff cardboard in very
large letters, frame it, and permit it to take
the place of the worsted motto which in
many houses has formed the chief deco
ration (?).
If, to use the language of that immortal
Mr.. Chlmmie Fadden, you're chasin'
yourself around the country" and meet a
snake, you need not trouble to
Instead s d draw yourself 9fras np IN the most a
nified manner, stare the serpent in the eye
and say "Osya.n / do not know how to
pronounce this word and ] beg that no.
body will ask me if the typ is soft or
hard; one of the charms about the mystic
words is that you can pronounce them as
YOU PiedSe, IuT 1t Is QOuDGiul II, west OF
Calcutta, anybody but few Oriental pro-
fessors knows just how they should be
uttered. l should like you to feel that +
am giving you much that is good in offer
ing this mystic slang; but it seemed to
me that, as words don't amount to so very
much, there could be no harm in trying
them. In that they are unlike patent
medicines. If you have ruby or sap
phire, or even an emerald sufficiently
large to take it, get the word r'Bedoohn
engraved upon IT, ana all the money you
want will come to you.
If somebody would only prove this,
would pawn the entire furniture and be-
longings of 1.-THE Hut to get a ruby and
to have the dinky word put on it. But,
alas! although 1 have heard the tale and
am repeating it, have never even met an
Oriental gentleman who had struck it rich,
so to say, by his mystic word. When you
have an enemy and meet him, hurl the
word "Abraxas" at him, and Immediately
a ladder Will fall on him, or ii it is she,
her hat will go out of fashion, but what
ever happens you will get the best of it. A
really, rightly enemy, one on whom you
wish all sorts of dreadful things to fall,
can be made to suffer dreadfu1ly if you
send him a sheet Of paper with "Abra-
zapta' written on it. It seems to me that
if these letters were spelled out on chill
dren's blocks there would be great run
on as. Perhaps it is because it is the first
letter and therefore difficult to learn. Well,
l don't care very much, for in my own
name / have the mystic letter A bounded
on each side by the mystic letter b, so
though you can't find Venezuela, there is
no difficulty in discovering BAB.