The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-08-13
"LARRY'' JEROME's JOKE.
IL Cost Congressman Tim Campbell
Basket of Champagne.
From the Philadelphia Tlmes.

From the Philadelphia Times.
Following yesterdays narrative of how
John Russell Young countered upon Lar
ry Jerome in an interchange of practical
jokes is one more story which l don't be-
lieve has before been printed concerning
the modern Theodore Hook. 1t is espec
tally worth telling because it is not only
strongly illustrative of his ability in that
line. but it brings him into CONJUNCTION. with
John Chamberlain. who himself dearly
loves mild POPULARITY at his fellow'man's
expense.
Chamberlain was abed in his Washing
ton hosiery, with his dearly beloved friend,
the govt Lawrence Jerome was in the
chamber conversng with him, when a
servant brought up the card Of Hon. Tim
Campbell, then newly known to fame as
the sweet-lisplng Celtic statesman from the
Fourth ward of the city Of New York
There was a hurried consultation between
the two famous jokers before Campbell
was given entrance, and meanwhile Jerome
had taken two humps of coal from the scut-
tie and wrapped them in pieces Of paper
placing one in an inner coat pocket and
holding the other concealed in one hand.
When the congressman entered the room
he found Chamberlain abed grooming ana
Jerome walking up and down the room,
holding one hand to his face and moan
ing most piteously. Campbell walked over
to where the famous bon Vivant lay ana,
having commiserated with him, turned TO
Jerome, and with that really sweet and in
imitable brogue which no types can repro
duce, said: "And what may be the mat
ter with you, Mr.. Jerome2"
Jerome m0aned all the louder, and hnai-
" said:,"Ah, my dear Mr.. Campbell, the
human mind cannot comprehend the depth
Of agony 1 am suffering. ann afflicted
With the most excruciating toothache, and
1t has driven me frantic
"And what may you DE doing for II, Mr..
Jerome?" said the Honorable Tim,
with sincere pity plainly wrought upon his
open coun tenance.
II have a great remedy-the only one
that gives me relief" answered Jerome,
between his groans. TT has been handed
down in our family for a number OF years.
II Is only a piece Of coal-ordinary coal
wrapped in a piece of newspaper and APP
piled to the afflicted spot. 1t takes time 10
accomplish the effect, but IL never fails"
'sSlIre. 1 never heard of that before"
said Campbell, incredulously. when /
was a boy in ireland I've seen old men put
a murphy-I mean potato, you KNOWN
one breeches pocket to drive away rheu-
natfsm. but then there are many virtues
in a potato But don't see how you can
get any good out Of piece Of hard coal,
except to burn It,"
'sWell," said Jerome, painfully you
NAV not believe me, but ii is the only
thing that affords me any relief" He then
made some excuse and departed for a few
moments from the room, leaving the piece
of coal wrapped in paper on the mantel-
piece.
when the door closed on him Camp
bell turned to Chamberlin and said: "The
mans crazy. Sure, Their is no virtue in
a piece of coal"
Chamberlin, irritably; "tramping around
here and making fuss over a little tooth
ache when l am suffering the tOrments
of the damned with the govt and blather-
ing about a piece of coal curing him.
Tim" he suddenly said, as his face light
ed as If he had just been seized with
an inspiration, take one Of those small
apples from that plate Of fruit on the
table, throw his old piece Of coal into
the scuttle and put the apple in its place.
Then wei see what the old idiot Will do
without his COAL.
look upon his face. "A great idea" was
all he said. Just then Jerome returned
to the room still moaning. He hurried
TO the mantelpiece picked up the wrap
ned apple and apparently placed II to his
face, but as he turned he managed 10 |
slip 1t into his inner coat pocket and |
take from II the other piece Of coal which |
was there concealed. He then resumed |
his moaning tramp up and down the |
room with his hand to his face. The Hon. |
Tim could scarcely restrain his laughter. |
and he finally said: 'Mr. jerome, why |
don't you put that piece of coal down. |
It can do you no good.
"Ah Mr.. Campbell" said the apparent |
victim of a raging toothache, you little |
Il begins to get I'm It's work. 1 can feel |
already the first symptoms Of Its wonder
full influence. All, yes, l feel 1t plainly. |
The pain is leaving me. Oh, what Won
derfui change! All, Mr. Campbell, it's a
wonderful remedy"
why" said the congressman, his soul
arising in revolt against man deceiving
himself with the idea that he is being
cured by a piece Of coal. when that small
chunk of anthracite was lying in the scut-
tie, you are deluding yourself. You
rafa IT. al In ErfrTr "a nd
80 how could it cure your"
The great joker looked at him in pain
and surprise. He could not speak for
moment and then he said in a plying
way: "Mr. Campbell what foolish man
you are. l put the piece Of coal within
this piece OF newspaper with my own
hands"
We'll" said the great and only Tim,
excitedly. TN bet you a case Of cham
payne that there's no piece Of coal there.
Said jerome sadly; Mr.. Campbell, /