Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1896-07-09
THE CHIGGER.
Bane of the Picnic Season i'm Old Missouri
and Thereabouts

bane OF the Picnic Season in Old Missouri
and Whereabouts.
simultaneously with the advent of
the merry picnic season comes the CHG
ger, a beast of mystery and of a retir-
ing disposition, says the Kansas City
Journal. His habits are predatory. and.
like the wicked flea, he frequently goes
where no man pursueth. But while not
possessing the saltatory powers of Pulex
lrritans he is much harder to hold up.
Those who have had the good fortune
to witness lovely woman capture flea
always have high praise for the expert
manner in which it is done. but the CHG
ger laughs her to scorn. and hides his
diminished head beneath her cuticle with
great speed and consequent irritation to
the surrounding tissue He gets there
before she does, and even the new wol,-
an can clrcumvent him.
The chigger is no respecter of person.
and nobody is exempt from his rayages.
The statesman of high degree and the
tender maiden are alike meat for him.
and equally toothsome. 1t is said that
cat may look upon a king with the
calnest composure and so. indeed. might
a Ginger, but a king cannot look on !;
chlgger by reason of the smailness of
the bug, and that is where the chigger
lays it over royalty. Certain learned
gentlemen who are versed in insect lore
tell us that the chigger is mite. and
there is probably no one with the temer-
ity to dispute the assertion. He is in
deed 'mitey," and will prevail in spite
OF our most devoted efforts.
But it is especially at those rural fes-
tivals called picnics that the chigger dis
ports himself with the greatest abandon.
There he has his innings and proves him.
self Nemesis of the deepest dye En-
JOY yourselves while We may. We merry
plcnlckers, for on the morrow We itch!
Ihe delights of the merry -go-round and
the custard pieare but evanescent things.
soon to fade away, but the chigger bur
rows like the tooth of remorse and bites
like sixty or any other mathematical
computation sufficient to convey the
idea. The habitat of the chigger is
among the weeds and grasses. There
he remains in outrageous retirement. en-
Toying the beauties of nature and bidng
ms time. The time soon comes. A fair
summer girl trips along with dainty foot
steps or perhaps reclmes at ease upon
the emerald sward, when the chigger
marks her as his prey, and takes pos
session at once. 1t is a fair land of
promise, and the grazing is good The
chigger rolls that damsel under his tongue
as q sweet morsel, and in the exuberance
of his glee shouteth ''Yum, yumv'
The remedy for the chigger is various.
EVERY woman mas her own private for
mula for potent chiggercide, ranging
from face powders to spraying with
frangipanni, but they all pale into insig-
nificance beside the ancient and time
honored practice of amounting with ba-
con. A crisp piece of breakfast bacon
showing a streak of lean and streak of
fat in the proper proportions is poison
to the chigger; sad commentary upon
his epicurean tastes, but as he is strictly
anthropophagous this is not matter OF
great surprise. TO pour oil into the
wounds made by the chigger is to grease
with bacon. 1t is like the precious ONT
ment which ran down upon Aaron's
beard, and it's influence is as balm upon
the distraught victim of the chigger's
voracity. But one thing must be borne
in mind. While
Bacon may render vain the chigger's sharp
bill,
The scent of the smokehouse will linger
thpra still