davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

earth is soon wiped out of man who tries to
guide the destinies of q journal in the country.
"I recall very interesting conversation
heard one day between my partner and
butcher who lived outside of the town and had
worked up the local meat men by bringing his
beeves and sheep in and disposing of choice
cuts at a ridicuously low rate The basis of
the row that followed lay in the fact that the
country butcher did not pay meat license
and consequently was able to sell his supply at.
cut rate, and in time worked considerable
injury to the butchers who were compelled to
pay city license.
"Things began to get very warm between
the two factions ana we took up considerable
space defending the local butchers, most of
whom advertised with us. One day the
country butcher came into the office with
about Iour columns of matter referring to the
fact that he was gentleman and good judge
of meat and that he had nothing but STALL
fed beef and also that he was citizen OF the
State and worthy of the patronage of the
people, Notwithstanding the fact that he did
not pay license. He dwelt at length upon
the point that he got into the butcher busi-
ness by accident and that he had no desire to
offend the local element, but that he wanted
to stand by his guns, and, by thunder, he
would.
But we do not want to publish tnat TRADE
against our ADVERTISERS answered my part
ner, who was nervous, ouick-tempered man
s'Well, responded the country butcher, Il
thort perhaps yer wud hsv liked to hev had
this yarn to fill up yer paper with
"My associate looked up from his desk,
glared at the man with the matter referred to
and bawled:
"'Wouldn't it be better. you confounded
lunatic, to give US half a beef to fill up our
pantries with?"
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

certain debt OF gratitude to dead monkeys.
which they could repay in no better fashion
than by showing decent courtesy to living
ones. And to this forcible reasoning Brummel
owes his wardrobe.
His master sent to Poole. Mr. Poole is the
most fashionable-which means the most ex-
pensive--tailor in London, and therefore in
the world. One has TO be introduced before
Poole viii make clothes for one. This was the
talk:
"You make ehildren's clothes 2"
mo-" replied Mr.. Poole.
won't you make an exception to your rule
in this particular case?'
"1'm sorry" answered the. tailor, "but we
haven't got a man in the place who can make
decent suit for boy"
ITO be fair with YOU" was the hesitatlng re-
ply, "it--it isn't boy"
nOh," said Mr.. Poole.
s'Yss," the ambassador went on, at isn't q
boy, it's q monkey"
Mr.. Poole drew himself to his full height
and, with considerable hauteur, replied:
"Thats different / thought it was boy.
WIN YOU bring the monkey here, or shall I
measure him ct his rooins?''
III guess you'd better send to his rooms" was
the reply. Hes not accustomed to tailor
What kind of suit do you want?"
"oh, want several suits A whole ward
robe. in fact. Brnmmel needs dress suit, an
gown, pajamas and bath robe.'
"How about watch and chain?" asked the
great London tailor, with rare burst of Brit
ish humor.
sro tell you the TRUTH" was the reply, .he
had little silver watch once, but he couldn't
out"
Mr.. Poole sent Dent-the famous Dent--his
head cutter, to measure Brummel, and
.xithin two weeks the monkey had the neatest
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
PARAGRAPHS ABOUT PEOPLE.

The Gear of Russia calls his baby girl by
diminutive that translated means s'Little
Blue-eyed."
Pillsbury, the chess player, eats one small
plate OF meat each day, drinks nothing but
milk, smokes rarely, sleeps eight to twelve
hours daily and rides bicycle.
Years ago Albert Wolff and Henri Rochefort
were the two fore most art critics of Paris. The
latter has recently resumed his work and his
critiques appear in Figaro, the journal on
which he won his spurs.
Herr Rengarten, the Russo-German news
paper man, who started some fifteen months
ago to walk-wherever walking was possible
around the world, is now in Turkestan. So far
he has covered about 1000 miles.
In Stepniak's latest book he stated that Rus.
sin stands third among nations In the number
OF books published, surprising Great Britain.
AS but little fiction is printed, the enormous
output OF serious literature is the more re-
markable.
1t is said that Rudyard Kipling never reads
criticisms on his own work now. either auda-
tory or condemnatory, as he finds that it per-
piexes his imagination and diminishcs his
creative energy. He says: "a writer finds his
happiness in creating, not in critics."
Miss Park, the Boston cornetist. who he's juet
been notified that her services will not be re-.
quired in New York church after May 1. Ia
another victim of labor-savins invention. A
cornet attachment has been added to the organ
in the church, making her services super.
f1uous.
Louis Vain, whose cat pictures have brought
him no inconsderable fame, originally in.
tended TO enter the musical profession. All
his drawings are executed with the left hand.
Last year alone he completed no fewer than
300 pictures-among them a special commits.
sion Tor the Emperor of Japan, who IL devoted
to cats.
Miss Mary Lord Drake, daughter of the new
Governor of Iowa, now by virtue OF the Cover
nor's widowhood the first lady In that State, is
q plonde OF medium height, with large expires.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
N0N-PARTISAN POLITICS.

The January number of Gttaton's Maqa-
zine contains an article by Edward Lauter-
bach on 'Non-Partisan Politics." which
deserves the attentive consideration of all
persons who may be inclined to favor such
politics during the coming elections.
There is nothing new in the article, but it
contains more comprehensive review of
the subject than has been published lately,
aud the argument against the folly and
fCtility OF fusion parties is stated with
great force and clearness.
After pointing out that polit ical parties
are necessary parts of representative gov
ernment, and that even the advocates of
non-partisanship do not dispute this, so
far as State and National affairs are con.
cerned, Mr.. Lauterbach goes to show that
parties are just as essential in the manage
ment of municipal affairs. "Manifestly.
he says, ''if well-digested principle of pub
lie policy is important in the affairs of the
State and Federal governments, it is more
important in the affairs of local munich
palities for the cities and towns are the
nurseries for the character, intelligence
and opinion out of which State and Ma
tional politics are made" 1t follows,
therefore, that if organized parties, with
established governmental princi pies, are
to prevail anywhere they should certainly
do SO in local politics.
1t is true that much evil exists in the
government of our cities, but the remedy
for this is not to eliminate party princi-
pies from municipal politics, but to infuse
into it more of those principles and
greater degree of party responsibility than
at present exists. If this were done State
and National parties would be- held ac-
countabie for what their representatives
did in civic administration, and there
would be greater degree of party pride,
party prestige and party success involved
in good government in cities, with re-
sulting greater degree of excellence in the
administration of such governments.
To relieve the great political parties OF
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
THE AMERICAN SPIRIT.

An amusing little incid ent, proving a
possibly unconscious requirement of the
American spirit of republicanlsm, oc-
Cured last Sunday during the public re-
ception given by the italian cruiser
Cristoforo Colombo, now visiting this
harbor. 1t has been the custom of Ameri-
can cruisers on reception days to receive
all who came, by whatever means they
arrived at the ships side. The officers of
the Colombo. animated by praiseworthy
desire TO turn the occasion into one Of
profit for the local Italian Benevolent
Society, made rule that no visitors ex-
cept those brought by the chartered tug
and launch of the society would be ad-
mitted.
Unfortunately this fact had not been
sufficiently advertised, and as a conse-
quence two distressing incidents ensued.
One was the loss of considerable money
by the owners of other craft who took out
visitors and had to return with them after
they had been denied admission to the
vessel, and the other was the freely out
spoken indignation of the Italian fisher
men who went to visit the vessel in their
own boats. In honor OF SO proud and
happy an event as an opportunity to visit
an armed vessel from the great country of
their birth we may be certain that they
had made their little boats shine, had
taken a holiday and had donned their
best clothes, besides likely taking along
their wives and sweethearts. They car
ried no pay passengers and went simply
as American citizens of Italian birth to
honor distinguished visitors from their
native country.
But they were very firmly turned back
by the officers of the cruiser, and in their
chagrin and indignation they fired an
audible broadside of remarks at the Italian
officers not at all complimentary to the
vessel and smoking with American patriot
ism. "You may take your old hulk!'' they
exclaimed. "We build better ships
every day right over on that shore than
Italy owns. We are American citizens,
and we have American money in our
pockets, and we don't care q sou for your
ship!" There was touch of humor
as well as a broad spirit of patriotism in
that.
The incident is not so trivial as it might
seem, for it is indicative of what residence
and citizenship in the United States put
into foreigner. He acquires large sense
of personal freedom and power that counts
on occasion, and it is when these imbibed
qualities in him are offended, even by digni-
fed officers of the country of his birth, that
his American republicanism makes itself
evident. That such spirit would be ex-
ceedingly useful to this country in the
event of war with a foreign power is a
matter that goes without saying, and it is
pleasant to observe how even small Incl
dent may kindle it.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
A MONKEY TO BE ENvIED.

One of the Union Club men owns q long.
bearded, white-faced, japanese monkey, whose
proud distinctionis that he is the best groomed
ard best dressed monkey in all the world, says
the New York World. His name is Brummel,
and the expenses of his wardrobe form an i'm
portanti titem in this gentleman's household ac-
counts. With all the rest of us, Brummel de-
scended from his ancestors. That is all any
body knows of his past.
1t was in London recently that the owner
conceived the idea of providing his monkey
with decent clothes. Man, he argued, owed a
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
AROUND THE CORRIDORS.

Te.fair Creighton, president of the Los An
geles Herald Publishing Company, dropped in
at the Press Club smoker Saturday night and
met the newspaper boys. Mr.. Creighton's
brother, viii s., is editor of the Herald under
Its new management, and the two men have
always had leaning toward the pencil drivers.
II used to be lawyer" said the former, "but
found that most OF the best-known attorneys
IN America were made by the press, and as /
never heard of lawyers making newspaper
man celebrated concluded to retire from the
law and get into journalism
81 used to be interested in little paper
back in Wisconsin, SO I am not entirely a
novice at the business. The popular belief that
newspaper men have first mortgage on the
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
A SONG OF SEASONS.

There's Joy, my dear in the youth o. the year,
When the hearts o. the bright buds break;
And the skies are blue as the eyes o. you
And the blooms blow over the lake.
There's Joy, my dear, for the world is fair,
And love Is the sweetest blossom there!
There's 10y, my dear, in the noon o. the year,
When the harvest hints o. gold;
And the soft sun streams with It's CLEANS and
dreams
On your beautiful hair unrolled.
There's 10y, my dear. for the world is fair,
And love is the blossom that's brightest there.
There's Joy, my dear, in the gray o. the year,
When the SHOWS are drifting white,
And the cold winds cry to the starless sky,
And the last rose weeps "t5ood nightv'
There's Joy. my dear, for the world is fair
While your love like lily is blooming there!
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
CURRENT HUMoR.

Mamma-Now, dear, can you remember any
thing about the sermon?
Small Daughter-Oh, yes, mamma. It was
all about the foolish people that strain at gates
and swallow sawmills.-spare Moments.
Title for the Colonial Secretary when raised
to the peerage: "Lord Joe-Hannesburg Lon.
don Punch.
"Don't you ever get tired Of doing nothine?'
asked one.
'.Oh, yes," replied the other, languidly.
swell, what do you do then?'
Take a rest."-Philadelphia Call.
"Do you own your own homer" asked the
passenger with the yellow diamond, VINO
makes busines of selling real estate.
81 do every Thursday" said the other passen.
ger
"Eh-what?"
81 own 1t every Thursday. That's Mary Ann's
afternoon out. t."-Indianapolis Journal.
Mrs. Jones-Nothing to-day.
The Tramp--Well, mum, if yer don't give me
sumthin to eat, I'll report yer to the hull pro.
fession as maxim the best mince pie In the
neighborhood an bein' very liberal to
strangers-Puck.
"Mrs. Ess entertained, assisted by Mrs. Tee. /"
"But Mrs Tee isn't received in good society -
II KNOW II. 1uey talked ABOUT her."
And the century was coming down the stretch
at the pace that ki.ls.-Detroit Tribune,
Arizona Editor-I see that the Eastern cult
still sticks to our new reporter.
Assistant-How's that?
Arizona Editor-In writing up that tar-and.
feather racket he mentions the victim as being
clothed in ''a garb of some soft clinging mate.
rial."-Puck.
The editor of New York comic paper has
just had a picture taken of himself and his
staff. That's the way an editor should always
be-with his wits about him.-Yonkers States.
man.
"Whats that queer splotch on the face of the
earth?" asked Apollo.
'That?' replied Pegasus, looking down over
his shoulder at the remains of the wouId-be
poet. "That is a little thing tossed off short
time ago in moment of Observation-Disclosures
apolls Journal.
But few men can handle q hot amp-chimney
and say there's no place like home at the same
time.-Bodie Index.
"John,' said the frightened wife in the mid.
die of the night, athere's something moving
down cellar, I'm sure" John listened intently.
"oh, it's nothing but the gas meter pegging
away" he said, with q sigh of relief.-Harlem
Life.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

sive blue eyes and a face indicating intellect,
refinement and strength of character. She is
her fathers secretary and confidential adviser,
as well as his social representative.
Princess Ii, the wife of Viceroy Ii Hung
Chang, is 80 years old, but is said to look
twenty years younger. Her feet have been
tortured to such smallness that she cannot
walk, and has to be carried about in a chair,
yet she owns 1000 pairs of shoes. Her hus-
bands wealth enables her to have 1000 silk
dresses. and she can select from 500 furs in
winter.
William G. Cowgirl and Joseph Brammal of
Paulsboro, N. j., have each received thirty
seven 2-cent stamps through the mail carefully
wrapped. but with nothing to designate who
the sender was. The letters were mailed at
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
Republican VS.. Democratic Rule.

Los Angeles Times.
During the years 1891, 1892 and 1893. under
the Mckinley tariff, our importations of for
eign products not subject to duty averaged
S431 ,21Sr r966. During the years 1894 and 1898
the importations of goods free of duty aver
aged 1854 ,073, 80, or about $47, 600, 600 less
under the Mckinley 'iniquity." This is a
sample OF the manner in which the party
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

the same time in New York Messrs Cowgirl
and Brammal were in business together in
Philadelphia about fifteen years ago, and it is
supposed they either overpaid some one or else
goods to the amount OF 81 48 were stolen aud
the party had become conscience stricken.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
How Not to Do 1t.
San Francisco star.

AS an example of chow not to do it.n the
Government suit against the Bell Telephone
Company is impressive. 1t was begun in 1887.
and the Government has now been given. bv
United States Circuit Judge Cole. in RostoTs
until May 81, 1896, to file evidence In rebnttai'
During all those years that company has gone
on extorting millions annually from the
people, while the Government lawyers are
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
cALIFoRNIANS IN NEW YORK.

NEW YORK, N. Y, Feb. 10.-Among recent
arrivals are: A. Meertief, Savoy; H. A. Burke,
st. Cloud; Miss Z. Fedderson, st. Nicholas; R.
J. Ferrer, Morton; c. r. Gardner, ST. James !;
D. S. Mcleod, Gilsey.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

An Austin youth whose income is not quite
as extensive as that of Vanderbilt got a large
inkspot on his coat. He asked q friend how
the stain could be removed.
"fou can get chemical preparation for 25
cents. Just soak the spot with it and 1t will
come out"
81 guess had better soak the whole coat.
can get 81 that way"
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
Great Oaks From Little ACORN.
Marysville Appeal

Marysyille Appeal.
Spain affects to treat the belligerency resoli.
ton, introduced in Congress recently. with
eontemptuous Indifference. Spain treated the
cuban revolution in a similar manner when il
was inaugurated. 1t don't now
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

Don't cali Paderewski Paddy" and he
won't call San Francisco Jay town.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
Benefits to nIamhers.

The Standard Automatic Gas Regulator in
attached to the meter, controlling the pressure
automatically, keeping the flame steady, and
breakage of globes, and saving from &C e 40
per cent.
New tips and burners are supplied, leaks and
if necessary, and all complaints connected
with the gas, electric bells or gas lighting
apparatus are attended to.
The monthly dues are according to the aver
age gas consumption and the quantity Of cleo
tric apparatus in use.
Gas Consumers Association, The Old Com
pany, 316 Post street. Telephone Main M, :
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

DIEGO RAMIREz-H. s. S. Stockton, Cal. The
Diego Ramirez are group of uninhabited ISL
ands sixty miles southwest of Cape Horn in
latitude 56 deg 25 min. south, longitude 6S
deg. a. min west
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

Coils continues to pull. but Uncle Sam s
leg doesn't stretch any more.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

The only way to reduce taxes to min
imum is to reduce bossism to nothingness.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
TOWNSHIPS Palace mixed candies, 15c h. y

SPECIAL information daily to manufacturers
business houses and public men by the Press
Clipping Bureau tAllen's), $40 Montgomery
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

The Senate promises that this week 1t
will really set to business, but some prom
ises don't count.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

The poker players will fight, OF course
If they cannot make bluff in one way
they will in another
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
ANSWERS TO CORRESPONDENTS.

LLoYD's REGIsrER-H. U. W., City. Lloyd's
Register is published in London by subserip-
ton and terms are furnished upon applica-
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

DR. sIEGERT's Angostura Bitters are the best
remedy Tor removing indigestion and all diseases
Of the digestive organs
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

For the lime being the musical storm
center of the country is located in our
town.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
McKinIey's Key to the Situation.

Phoenix (Ariz.l Republican.
If President Cleveland had the Mckinley bill
back OF his administration he would not be so
much worried by the Morgan syntilcate He
would have no bonds to sell.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

The crisis in Cuba is near at hand, and
what is more it is at our hand.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

strong pull will get the new building
for the Postoffice started, provided we al!
pun in the same way.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

The human system is given tone and renewed
vigor by Hoods Sarsaparilla, which strengthens
the organs of the stomach and aids digestion. In
TACT, the whole body is invigorated by HOODS.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
| which is avowedly opposed to 'sprotection
robbery has "lightened the burdens of the
The People should own the water

The People Should Own the Water.
Modesto Herald.
With the water supplies of this valley in the
hands of private capital, twenty-five years
would suffice to make the owners of the water
the virtual owners of the land and the farmers
their mere hired hands. We have our gold
kings, cattle kings, railroad kings and land
kings. If the irrigation district system is de-
clared not public use, the era of the water
king will be at hand, and he will be king of all
in the semi-arid lands OF the Great West.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
THE CALL SPEAKS FOR ALL.

There is victory ahead for US if we &C
ahead to get it.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

BRONCHITIS. Sudden changes Of the weather
cause Bronchial Troubles. .Byotcn's Bronchtol
zroches will give effective relief.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11
VIEWS OF WESTERN EDITORS.
Demand for BIaine's Policy.
Sonoma Index Tribune.
II Blaine were with us Cuba would be a free
State to-day.

Ignorance Not q Qualification.
Los Angeles Capital.
citizen who does not read the newspapers
is not qualified juryman. He should GO fish
ing IN the Dead Sea, where there are no fish.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

JUMPING-J. s., Walnut Grove, Sacramento
County, Cal. The jumping record of the olym-
pic Club of this City is % feet 215 inches, made
by V. B. Schifferstein in Oakland. That also
is the coast rennrd
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

The P's and Q's the Senate should attend
to in discussing the emergency tariff are
patriotism and quickness.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

Kaiser William is keeping up his repu-
tation as lightning change artist. Last
week he was twisting the lions tail and
now he IS patting the brute on the back.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

CHESTER A ARTHUR-O. s., City. When ex-
President Chester A. Arthur died he LETT two
children, Chester Alan Arthur and his sister,
Helen Herndon, and at last accounts both were
living in the city of New York.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

Illinois Democrats find that Altgeld is
not only in the saddle but has the cinch
straps drawn tight on the donkey
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

In replying to our Government on the
Venezuelan question Lord Salisbury is
taking as much time as if he thought him.
self as big as a United States Senator.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

The Chamber of Commerce should begin
the campaign for untaxed ships at once
and do a good deal OF education before
party politics absorb public attention.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

While the big pugilists are looking for a
fighting-place in Mexico, the "boxing car
nival' in Boston is running right along
under the sanction of the Board of Alder
man
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

1t is asserted by the Washington corre-
spondent of the Chicago Record that Blaine
favored Cullom as the next Presidential
nominee of the Republican party, but pol
itics have changed since Blaine's time.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

With a cessation of the third-term move
ment, Presidential politics in the Demo-
cratic party has ceased to move at all, and
begins to look like stagnant pool.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

Consul-General Jernigan reports there
are great possibilities for American trade
with the Orient, but points out the need OF
American ships as factors in the trade, and
the pointer Is of value to California.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

II the report be true that the Russian
Armenians have gone to the assistance of
their kinsmen in Turkey there is likely to
be high old time in Europe before the
coming summer is over.
The San Francisco call., 1896-02-11

Dion BoUcIcAUIT-H. W., City. Dion Bouci-
cault was the true name of the playwright and
dramatist. He was born in Dublin, Ireland,
December &C. 1922, his father, Frenchman,
being engaged in business there at the time.
He died September 18, 1890.