The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-08-20
TO RELOCATE THE "sTovEaIPE."
An English Lord Wants to DO Away with
the Plug Hat.


An English Lord Wants to Do Away with
the Plug Hat.
Roughly speaking, the average Eng
lishman is pretty certain TO make one or
two remarks when he gets up in the
morning. If the sporting instinct is
strong in him-and it is in most Eng
iishmen-he exclaims: Lets {go and
kill something" But, if he is animated
by desire to set the world right, he
soliloquizes thus with HIMSELF go
10, now; let us start a reform
movement" Next, perhaps to Killing
something, the Englishman most loves
to compel a lot of other people to be
good, or at least better than they were
before, according to his way of think
ing. 1t makes no difference that the
people he sets ont to reform may not
be such bad sort-that, on the whole,
they measure up fairly well 10
the standard of average worth
and speciality. They do some
thing, or perhaps only think
something, that the reformer has de-
cided must not and shall not be pone
Dr. thought. SO he starts a movement,
with himself as leader, establishes a
propaganda, forms a society with
name as long rs the moral law, and
then goes up hill and down dalsiflaking
converts. The number of mr. tents
that blossom ont in England e'rr sssear
into socie ties, with paid officials and
portentous reports of good work done,
is past computation. Many of them, it
is true, are closely related to the for
ward movement of humanity, and are
deserving of all the support they re-
ceive, but others are purely fantastic
and visionary, like the Society for Pro-
testing Against the Evil of Using the
| Right Hand in Preference to the Left,
as Contrary to Scripture and Common
Sense" But, however visionary such
societies are, they all get support and
make numerous disciples.
| Here, for instance, is Lord Ronald
| Cover, a somewhat well-known figure
in the social and aristocratc world of
London, coming forward with a brand
new movement of abolishing the plug"
hat, on the ground that it is most
uncomfortable and hideous headgear,
wGrthy of a scarecrow, but not of a
| human being" These be swelling
words, and it may be true words, but
what are they going to amount to?
| Does Lord Ronald Cover seriously eX-
pect to convert the Anglo-SaXon race
from the plug hat habit? If so, he
| isnursing chimera of the most chimer-
| ical kind. Even the Grand Old Man
| himself wouldn't succeed in such
! crusade. For, mark you, the plug"
hat is strong in its very weakness, and
| sits securely on the head of the Eng
disappearing race, not because it is
the ideal hat, but because it isn't. 1t
| is uncomfortable, says this lordly re-
! former. OF course it is, and therefore
t,he average Englishman will wear it
and nothing else when he is dressed up
and on public parade. If he wants to
be comfortable he goes home and gets
into his dressing gown and slippers.
The fact that the plug hat is uncom-
portable is the best possible evidence
that it must be good form. And when
thing is good form, what moTeean you
ask?
But, continues the critic, the plug"
hat is hideous The word ''hideous" is,
perhaps, little strong; ugly" would
be nearer the truth. If, however, Lord
Ronald Cover thinks that the English
people will give up the plug" hat when
he tells them it is hideous or ugly he
makes the mistake of his life. They
Niow already that it is ugly, and that is
why they wear it, If it was dream of
artistic beauty they would have none of
it. The descendants of the old sea kings
are no mollycoddles; they are not 60
ing to go around wearing beautiful
hats. Outside beauty is a snare; what
matters it, indeed, how ugly your hat
IS if only your heart beats true to your
native land? Such would be the average
| Englishman's defense of the plug"
hats ugliness, if he ever thought it
worth while to defend what needs no
defense. The plug" hat is both I'M
comfortable and ugly. Very true.
But it is an evolution Of Anglo-Saxon
| civilization. 1t was not reasoned into
| its present shape, and it is certain that
| il will not be reasoned out of existence,
even though parliament and the bench
CT bishops should start movement
with that object in view.-N. Y. Trib-
| me.