davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24
e.1-o,rIIIAI.pY TIMES.

.ivtn. Texas --Doar Haphamfner' nave
49,, ,.r,lteu 20 The Post bofore, bu. a.
I'M want 10 join ths lttle Hap, wlll "a wr ra.
iosy an nsary Ses ysars sin ana and d"'
tsa "i ~ slch happy times. we eat STRAW
i nn, ,ide the donkey. fee me On ckels
ducks ana gosiines. go 10 see ,hs nl,hns
a,,u MOVERS our yard Is SO pretty now.
v We AVE such beautiful pini's ara water
ii,s n tubs Wen sunday cones .'a,ns ws ="
20 md papers. I'm glad Wiiofa il
so nanny over her chair. She WIZ sn1oy u
w so rniefl. Ny vote Is for v!ole, ana white
io"' NV Flora Lillian Steele.
BEST CONTEST YET.
Eos.e Texas-Dear Haphammer: en-
10Y reading the letters and learning "a'
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24
HAP TALKS.


Boys and G!rls.
.,r Happyhnmmers The club seems
anxious to secure an invalids rolling
I, for little Daisie pliphint of Sabine
= that the Haphammer has decided
esen receiving contributions for that
nose. In fact, some Of the members
70 much In earnest about the matter
they Just wolldu't wait any longer.
,er came from Hattie roole of Hemp
,ut week, in which g was inclosed
Daisies chair. OF ,hls amount SIS
given by Hattie and her little broth
Adrian. Claude and Perkins, while her
sns Norma and Gcrrude Pratt, sent
other 70 cents. Aua Springer of
Bernard and Ray ferrcnot of Vic
also sent contradictions. so We al
" have good star Several Happy
liners have written nice letters about
BE. and SO many aye anxious to do
ethng to make her life brighter and
asr that it Will, no doubt, take US
few weeks 10 secure the amount
for chair, oi course. we want
stt her good one an. one that viii
iEeat confer, 20 i-e little invalid
know Daisie was paalyzed when a
and has never wllltel IL step In her
Her letters to the club have always
sweet and unronflaining, and all
little friends uri-' It pra,sing her
~ disposition aud hna heart. We
70 not have better opportunity for
lnsring happiness. Tho Haphammor
begin publishing he list of contrib
nhsxt week
a. and ,rar 49,
lonr b,,, me- 's ., WV n .,
,nn In store ,or =, 49,. "'I ,,'',
blue and s,o,. 80 ,, .'eN' "ee", n s,
"a bsvnr nos s'as .".NtS 'he ieaa' IN
,'ee our last report. OF this number
~" ia came from Ray Pcrrenot of
aSsa There were 50 MANY names on
AN that it couldn't be published.
W me rules We're compiled with and
vote was counted Tho blue and gray
~ now have their eolors 1876 ahead of
md white, which comes second.
and gray has taken third place.
~ only few votes behind blue and
. 'aat color dream Of Lee Stuart's
asood that it may result In several
'0.ers abiding by the judges de-
~ xaich was in favor of rose and
mere were several other very in
eAs color letters, though. and 1T is
~ which Iiappyhammer is prov
v, co,s. CHAMPION for his or her
Il ,.,. 's' And ihen all Will be very
s,..' a'ea IN the excellent descrlp-
o,,. ',Aement house life, the parks and
Nam. sa'aeh OF Cincinnati, written
M. - toFcoFan, as well as Guy
caterpillar letter.
tr'sl Happyham,n.,s ,o,,a ,.r,,,e,
ss',ins letters ahon, ,ho "o,o,s - ~
's'sm flowers. one of Tho ls,os, t,ou..,.
hume tbasa 'ns o'her day, is TO dye and
M u'ese delicate creations of nature.
pen, Ia Ia, '"''''is's are never
TALLY ,.v,. wen enough alone, but are
ta,a.n 'ne No"crs OF the field
M false a 'o'cihs them to parade
'au bo,h eo.ors' Many fashionable
W have M ~ american and European
Pss,tsrIe. ~ u up regular chemical
Es., tor 81 connection with their hot
EH The nas on this unique IN
lsaed in ,h S' steps in this direction
F.n As ~ ''ieiai dyeing of such
sal know. ana the hyacinth. There Is
sA.iy .h, h New York florist who Are.
10 wi. ~. the colors of these flow.
l,hy ma, nv whims and fancies Of his
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24

LEARNED A LEGION

A physician who has in his employ a ne
gro boy says that the amusemnpt derived
by himself and his family from tho boy's
answers TO questions put with n view to
puzzing him more than compenaaieB for
his ignorance, which II comprehensive.
Go 10 ny study and bring me the hot
tie of ammonia | have left on the desk T"
tn, doctor said to the hoy one day, "and
be careful. for ammonia IL combustiblc
fluid"
When the boy returned with the bot
tie he seemed n little out of breath, and
af,cr keen glance at him the doctor
a, ked;
Jim. do you know what combustible
fluid is?"
pronptrieHs. u reckon I does, II means
something dat'll most knock anybody over
dai Jess happen to smell oh II. sahp'
Ma further reference was made TO the
matter. but from that day the doctor
found that the words "combustib'e fluid
were sufficient to secure anything from
the Investigations into which Jim's In
aulring mind night Otherwise lead him.
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24
THE CONTRIBUTIONS srARr,D.

linmphill, TcNaS.--beAr I!aphlmmcr: In
your last weeks paper | read a lctitr
from onlc Mendcr Of Mil'r, IN whith
she told the llnpuylamm, abon, la Sc
tliphint's recent trouble AN. asked Them
TO buy her n rolling chaiil | am 50 siaJ
she wrote about her. pa'Aic has been
my schoolmatc and lovr h1t And sylnpa
thize with her so 'nuen In atu,tiou
to her afnciion she has secn SO niue ,
trouble, About two wears aeo she bad
n Kind little brother. who WAS strong
enough to carry her vA"r, she went h,i
he died aud as soon ass hef little twin
brothers We're large cipasN - pm hei
In her little WAGON one rf 'hrm wSs
drow ned do not 'hi AZ that an orpor
tuuiiy can come IN which W. IAN more
truly hammer hapnacss' tNnn IN this
one and 10 hope the HnrrNhammers
Will contrlhutr II Oh go. nave Twin
brothers aged named AlilAn a,l
CLAUDE and a nth, brother aged I nan ed
Perkins who MISC then uen's oni, led
as iiappNhammc-s ard ihtS vote !ur
blue and wniia IN ihc s3inr contest THIS
combination is IN the iead and ! hope II
will win | think IT VII be pretty auH
! love the omhtM nf ttuil tnn purity,
We enclose ST. o nfb biy Daisies ehhif
uud my itile COUSINS Norman aud ,''i
iriids Pratt E'ni - fnta lso, innhiAS
totni of $2.oo Low 10 the 'paam-
ner and all tne Hans. Your h'em.,
iiatitt V. ltt'r,
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24
A CONCLUSION.

III I was a fellows mother,
I'd never. never sec
A single thing that fellow did
That wasn't meant for me.
ia lie, him stay out after dark:
l never would say No.
Because that stirs a fellow up
And spoi,s his temper sol
"l'd say, Play first and study NEXT
And, DO not 80 to bed.
No matter what o'clock II IL,
Until your storys rcnd.
~ would no, know he'd been kept In.
Or ask the reason why.
I'd he quite blind to all such thinge,
Or Kind OF pass them by.
IRA give him pudding, pies and Jam
And narmulndc and cake
But would not even mention bread
And all the nuts he'd take.
"oh, we're fellows mother
A certain ones know
Wouldn't he have the slickcst time.
You'd better believe It's 80,
"nu,--,f. I Was that. fellows mother.
DO half that follows mother does
For him' Or bc-Eo good'
II wonder II I'd mend his clothes
Without II single scowlT
And only say, IDENTITY. dear boy
AT his most horrid howl?
~ wonder II whsn he. was sick
ld be 80 awful ktndv
And never breathe, 4 told YOU sol'
or reg, you didn't mind
'Iiut ouly an mud hnthc his head
In such Il peaceful way,
with some,,ne wort Of sweet aud cool.
Fcr maybe thNt think II over.
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24
A SILVER WEDDING.

c,,nv side. Texas.-Dear Haphammer:
,,ua e a farmer and has about twenty.
Az a~pa acres OF cotton and fifteen ceres o.
corn. he has in SO much crop ne oan
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24
rR1ENpsHIP AND PEACE.

has hsan a long time since wrote iast.
We'll. we are having a contest for panse
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24
1nNorar 80 ~ THE YEAR.

Harptrs found Table.
Tcarhrrran any .ittiS hoy ten me
Hili. =. ne fellows say the day before
Christsnas ara sGrne say the day before
the iouIth Of July.
cartion,-PeY otiy DR.. Thompson's Ego
Water CarNle.iy examine the outside
wrappty, Nons ether genuine.
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24

NV nugzcr went TO church today.
WY wpsrs IN her hair.
y she lpols'd 80 Nw"cl ana lube'y
| visited WIS dorc,
Ncn ! cried. n Nursvy sCplded.
N wuined AWAY n hid,
- whpu nonndY W.lan't louhin'
last uysrn | did
n went ma folded Tuwser.
\ brolt,l iia collar chnii
n told him. "lfind my Muzzer. dear
Like wr often plnNln'.
Sen kiilie linhcr com'd along,
My eWueAt iSiitie Cat
~ ticu my hnn,um wonrtcr crowod,
n flcvrd ny an m" hat
X q'owser smeiled stmfn' rico
y started down de Ntieet,
N nul,pd the chain 20 nwfui hard,
Mopi lnafed INF my feet
/ X kp,in Tlnbrr followed ilpse
'Tnneo aht n i;nn ~ 'br
y. los lie bcs'eet corimnwas--
Sn tilu1krr says We be-.
y Bon he todeh ou my Int,
hes Ike napin bird
l,rl icd lot soldiers once.
50 muzzer enys IN. hoard
n TowNcr founded nu2Scr sure
In church n-alttln' dore
knowed her by tho wosos wed
She npnred in her hoir
u 'rowanr hnawtd her too. AMI hhrked'
said "Nux2nr dear,
Nc's ruine Ia chnroh to stay wiv 100
pero'n four OF W IN hero
'nnrs Hon, n Kitie Tinker ent
'rvfwa-r's only fwen-
fourm acre wa munger ono
~ on II must hr me-
~ my uuiasrr lopktcd 80,
slf she wnRni flad.
y puf wight up n shaved m" oht
j.ihc wna n~ful Ind .
y! Towse'r larlsod u folltscs laughed,
-, n,u he erownd. dos once.
n WHOM we got outside Dc door;
NJ nr,z5r nnlcd me- Ounce,
f%nn PIC r Tod, ~ crlod TOO.
I love .af nn2ycr 80, .., II,
NJ fnngha she'd be so dreffle glad
L Z
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24

Oh. gentlo May,
Your prescncn gny
Hriues one regret to mar,
Yo,irc not TO blame,
But just the snnnc,
You haven't nny "r.
Washington Sfar.
Whom one IL the picture of despair
You're very apt 10 iind
Tint ho Inns somehow got himself
In IL terrible frame Of mind.
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-05-24

attend to 1, as 1, should be. 1t Is In the
bottom where we lived last year. but we
had to move on, on account of sickness.
My unc,c has an arfNry and he calls 1t
the Silver Lake. Papa has one called the
Crescent Bend, Well, Haps. haven't but
one pet and tina, Is colt She VIII qui,
eN,'ng and come for me 10 pc, her, Our
teacher Miss Compton had the school
photographed the las, day. but the pie.
lures were not good Y was too dark ana
cloudy, We attended MIR, and Mrs Crck-
cr,'s sIlNcr wedding on April q. The
bride was crowned with q silver crown
aud the groom wore u bunch of silver
nowers on his coat, Their Oldest daueh.
ter made them speech. but We couldn't
understand II, as they are Germans, They
gavc II grand bail. never enjoyed my
self better | vote for blue and white
viii ask n riddle 1.-THE beginning of etcr-
nifty. the end OF time and slScc; the be
ginning OF every end and the end otcvery
place Love to You and the iiops. Your
friend, pelma kirk Middlebrook'
RIG BLUE AND GRAY CLUB.
Victoria, Texas Dear Haphamucr; 81.
lence does not always denote idloness, as
YOU VIII see by the IN names here. bu;
| do no, &c, ali the crcdi, Tor II. Several
OF my friends wishing blue and gray 10
win. have helped me sc, these votes for II,
MIR. Bonner helped me by e%i'nS ,h'
names of those at the office. Henry cars
net got all except two Of the names on
the large paper: Bette Lowe and sew
cral others. among them Ida Grocc. have
helped me a good deal, Blue and gray
Haps, let's all go 10 work, and II our
friends help us. Ike good many OF min,
have helped me, feel sure We viii -set
oiir colors take tho lead and keep II.
send 10 cents for my badge and cen'r
for starting "A collection 10 &c, pnisic a
chuir liaps let's make M to her all We
can Tor the loss OF her ilt;lc brother. l,ii
amy OF you notice In last SuudaN'S Post
our two it,lc crippled llars leucrs9 on
! followed the other. The Two little letters
/ right together presented a striking CON
trast--thc one fun OF SORROW and sad
ness. with desire to he patient thrAast
It all aud the other ili OF hrightnosf
aud happiness a our ht,e favor. so
! ilars les make the other little hear
/ happy too am ilarpyhnmmer
/
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08
The Presidents Chair.

The only vacant seat in the galleries
when the house was called to order and
the only one that was not occupied dur
ing the proceedings Of the day is that
which the rules of the house reserve
for the president of the United States.
On such occasions it is usually filed by
members of the cabinets families or
visitors to the city to whom the presi-
dent or Mrs. Cleveland sends cards, but,
although the rest of the galleries were
damned with people, this conspicuous
seat was empty ell day and afforded
tonic of ccuVersation
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08

The New Workers are telling one an
other Of good joke on Rev. John Wes-
ley Brown, rector of ST. Thomas church,
previously rector of st. Paul's in that
city. His part in the ceremonial of the
Paget-Whitney wedding was to read the
service. Either he had marked the
wrong place in the prayer book or the
singing disconnected him; at any rate
the wedding party was amazed to hear
his rich, full voice utter the words: 81
am the resurrection and the life"
Heavens and carth!" CALCULATED
Bishop Potter. in whisper behind him.
The rector at once awoke to the fact
that he was reading the burial service.
and, after ole breathless second, he
proceeded with the proper ritual.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08
HIS RETORT COURTEOUS.
Would Change the Story So as to Civ
Due Credit.

Would Change the Story So as to Give
Due Credit.
DR.. Chalmers, the eminent divine,
was fond of telling the following story:
Lady Betty Cunningham, having had
some difference of opinion with the
parish minister, instead of putting her
usual contribution in the collection
plate, merely gave a stately bow. This
having occurred several Sundays in
succession, the elder in charge of the
plate at last lost patience, and blurted
out: eve cud dae wi less O. yer man
ners, an nlair O yer siller, ma Teddy"
Dining Oh one occasion at the house
of nobleman he happened to repeat
the anecdote, whereupon the host, in
a not over-well pleased tone, said:
'Are you aware, DR.. Chalmers, that
Lady Betty is a relative of mine?''
81 was not aware, my lord" replied
the doctor; ''but, with your permission,
I shall mention the fact the next time
I tell the story"
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08
Petroleum in Russia.

A peculiar fact in respect to petro-
1eum is the difference of conditions IN
der which that oil occurs in Russia and
America. In the former it is found in
strata of the tertiary period, usually a
formation resembling a quicksand, and
at depths of only few hundred feet.
In our own country it occurs at great
depths in the older compact sandstones
and limestones. American oil yields a
very large proportion, say about 70 per
cent, of Illuminating oil exactly suited
for combustion in our ordinary lamps;
the Russian oil produces far less of
such oil and larger proportion Of
high-class lubricating oil. The Rus
sian Illuminating oil also requires to be
burned in modified form of lamp with
a more perfect draught.in order to over
come it's tendency to produce smoky
flame, and it is largely this fact which
has prevented the consumption of Rus
sian oil for light abroad
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08
ENTANGLED IN HIS OVEECOAT.

Unfortunate Pret1icament of a Very Fat
Man at the Theater.
He was such very fat man that the
entire audience turned around to look
at him when he came into the theater
in the middle of the first act and took
his seat in an orchestra chair. He wore
his last years fall overcoat, says the
Philadelphia Record, which was tight
for him. He had evidently taken on
flesh during the year. He paid no at
tention to the interest his neighbors
evinced in him, but sat down and at
once became absorbed in the play. He
grew warm, and with his eyes still
glued to the stage, he arose and shed
his overcoat. The people around him
began to litter, and finally TO laugh
very audibly. The fat man realized at
length that the people were laughing at
him. Then he noticed, with great con-
fusion, that he was in his shirtsleeves.
His sack coat had come off with the
other. He put them both on again and
tried to peel off the overcoat, but it
wouldn't saove a little bit. He gave a
desperate tug and wriggled his fat
shoulders, and the next moment he was
in his shirtsleeves again. "Get out!'
"Sit down." rip it off" cried the
people behind him, but the fat man tried
again, and with the assistance of two
men in the seats behind him he finally
managed to shed his overcoat.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08
ODD BILLIARD FACTS.
Making a Table in Day-The Balls Sea-
soned in Incubators-Coloring Red Balls.

Making a Table in Day-The Balls Sea-
soned in MISUNDERSTANDING Red Balls.
A billiard table can be built in "a
hours if carte blanche is given to the
manufacturer, but he prefers to have
time to get the right effects, from one
month to six. The wood needs to be
seasoned for a period of nearly seven
years. Rich, deep Spanish mahogany
is used, pollard oak, ebony and satin
wood.
Tables are not always covered in
green. Blue is sometimes used and
pure olive green. The late Prince Leo
pold was the first to make use of the
latter color, and olive green is known
to-day IN the billiard world as prince
Leopold's color"
The balls must be well seasoned be-
fore they are used for play. Manufac-
turers have incubators in which to store
them that they may undergo the drying
process. Some incubators will hold
fully 5000 balls. When they are first
made they are green" Solid ivory is
the only satisfactory material of which
to make them: artificial balls Chose
made of composition) are much heavier
and do not wear well. English makers,
to give the red balls a perfect color,
steep them in a decoction that is some
times described as the "guardsman's
bath" This is extracted from the old
coats of Tommy Atkins" and for bill
lard balls it is the finest scarlet dye
known.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08
Married at Kansas Citv.

William G. Off. we'll known young
man of this city, only son of Mrs. A.
Y. Off, has perpetrated genuine sur
prise on his numerous friends here by
his recent entry into the realm of mar
ital bliss. The wedding occurred at
Kansas City, Mo-, May IL last, and was
not divulged in Watertown circles un-
til the receipt of press clipping last
week giving detailed account Of the
affair, which, by the way, bordered on
the romantic. The account, taken
from The Kansas City Times, is as fol-
lows:
The marriage Of Miss Edith Torrey Kellogg,
of Geneva, N, Y, to William ChappelI Off, a
well do commercial traveller of New York
city, told in yesterdays Times, was of a more
romantic nature than was at first supposed.
The wedding was against the wishes of the
young lady's relatives in Kansas City, with
whom she had been visiting for about six
weeks, and was accomplished by bold move
on the part of her sweetheart and his friend
Clerk Sam Campbell, of the Hotel Savoy
For two years Mr.. Off and Miss Kellogg have
been acquaintances and have been engaged
most of that time. When the young woman
came west on a visit, Billy Off found it con-
venient to be in Kansas City quite often. He
called occasionally at the home of Miss Kel-
logg's uncle, ". H. Brundage. 1S49 Independ-
ence avenue, where she was stopping Fin
ally, last Sunday evening" Mr.. Brundage told
the young man that further calls could be
dispensed with, and forbade his niece seeing
him again while here.
Mr.. Off consulted with Mr.. Campbell. and
they decided that speedy action must be
taken. The unrelenting uncle had forced
matters to an issue. The two secured mar
rage license, boarded an Independence av-
enue car and went to the Brundage resi-
dence. Bravely they walked up to the front
door and asked to see Miss Kellogg When the
young lady came to the door she quickly an
preciated the situation, and securing her
wraps, left the house with her captors before
her aunt knew what was transpiring. Mr..
Brundage was safely in his office When the
trio reached Grace Guild church they found
Rev. Cameron Mann just preparing Tor a
spin on his bicycle. He was dressed in his
bicycle suit, but there was no time to be |
lost, and the ceremony was performed with
the minister attired in that costume.
After the marriage was over Mr.. and Mrs |
Off returned to the relatives home There
was nothing to be done safe forgive them, |
which the stern-faced uncle and weeping
aunt did with as good grace as pos
slble. The couple left for Excelsior Springs
instead OF Geneva, as first given out for two
weeks, and will reside in Kansas City The
father of the bride, who died about five years
ago, was one Of the most prominent lawyers
in New York state.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08
BENDING OF WOODS.
An Art Extensively Used in Carriage and
Boat Building.

An Art Extensively Used in Carriage and
Boat Building.
Comparatively few persons outside
the carriage and bodybuilding indus
try are aware of the extent of the wood
bending industry, and but few realize
that the carriages they ride in are very
largely made of such wood-the felloes
of all their wheels are bent and made
in two parasitic framework of coaches
and heavy carriages is nearly all made
of bent stock, and not only better made,
but more cheaply-and the frames of
pleasure boats are bent, as also many
of the frames of the finest sailing
yachts; furniture, too, of many kinds
has bent frames, all the celebrated
Thonet chairs, for example, being made
entirely of wood thus treated. The OBJ
ject of bending is twofold, says tire
Woodworker, namely, saving of time
and stock and stability and strength of
the work when put together-this indie
pendent of beauty of form; and bent
carriage shafts are almost, if not en-
tirely, used now, instead of the OLD
style, clumsy, sawed ones. Skill in
manipulating the material is very es-
sential; simply the forms to bend on,
and the steam box in which to soften
the wood do not alone insure success in
the operation-it is necessary to know
perfectly the stock to bend, it being SO
variable that no two pieces bend alike.
Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1896-07-08
Tiherius, PIensu~a GaUeru

Divers in the Lake of Nemi, near Al
bano, have found at the bottom of the
lake, 80 feet from the shore, the pleas
ure galley in which Emperor Tiberius
held his orgies. 1t still seems to be
decorated with brcnzes and Mosaics.
They have brought up bronze heads,
wolf and lion, targets with inscrip-
tions and rings for the docks. Cardinal
Colonna tried without success to re-
cover the galley in the 18th century,
and another attempt was made at the
beginning Of this century, when some
large bronze nails were brought up.