Omaha daily bee., 1896-02-23


disclosed fer the satisfaction OF vulgar
curiosity Hencs whether the proposal is
ever made fOrneliy ~ She woman rather
than the man, and, IL the inVets'cn OF the
usual method of procedure occurs, how often
II takes place, cannot be krown. \ mau
who receives such flattering demonstration
OF feminine preference and boasts of It, or
otherwise violates the sacred confdeLce In
which such a confession was made, IS a
wholly contemplate fellow, whose word no
one would take.
A letter from young woman of Pough-
keepsie. published In the Sun the other dag,
suggests, however, that the traditional priv
iiege enjoyed by women In leap year is seii
ously regarded by some. IL not many, OF
them, for the writer must be taken as repre-
sentative Of feminine feeling to a greater or
less extent -Four years ago she looked on
leap year with amusement only, she says.
II never occurred to her 20 improve its pc
cuiar privilege, but now. at the graver age
Of 2S, she acknowledges Il no longer seems
funny to her" She is disposed to take adj
vantage Of the liberty Of proposing marriage
which 1t allows her. She ie willing herself
to PROFOUND the momentous question, but
she asks us for counsel as to the proper,
advisable and most successful method of do
ing IL. She wants to know whether she
should beat around the bush or put the
question directly and pumply, and If there
is not danger, in case the man rejected her
proposal he would outrage her feelings and
betray sacred confidence by telling of her
revelation.
We are obliged to confess that there is that
danger, so far as concerns many men. The
novelty of the proceeding might induce them
10 describe it, The probability also is that
for the same reason she would be more likely
to suffer the modification of a rejection than
to enjoy the satisfaction Of an acceptance.
Long custom and the very nature of man in
duce in him a preference for taking the lead
on such an occasion. according to his own
faacious conception. He desires to appear
to himself as the active lovemaker He
wants to feel that he has conquered the heart
of the girl in an engagement in which he
was the aggressor. Practically he deceves
himself Instead Of winning heart he loses
a heart The final proposal does not come
from the woman. but the affection which pro-
yoked 1t was cultivated and stimulated by
her. Love first warmed her heart, and with
feminine art inherited from Eve herself and
brought to the highest, finest and most deli
cate perfection during the many thousands Of
years of its cultivation by women, she kindfes
a responsive emotion In his breast. Thus II
may be said that both in leap year and In all
years women virtually make the proposal
They lead up to it. They ncite 1t. They ar
range the circumstances favorable for it.
They smooth the way to it. They sugges;
1t to the man. unless he be a conceted fellow
so far confident of his supposed destinations
that he invites his deserved rejection by
thrusting his unwelcome advances on the
woman. The mother of a girl will often as
sist her in this warfare on masculine heart,
employing in her behalf the most consum-
mate strategy.
This is not at all discreditable to women.
1t casts upon them no injurious reflection.
1t Is rather a glorious tribute to them
They are the source and fountain of the
for and
which controls mankind. They give to ex-
istence poetical color. Nor do we mean to
imply that consciously and deliberately they
set out to provoke proposal. They only fol-
low instincts and obey the law of their being
without studied consideration of the
methods they pursue, unless they be veter-
ans at the business in whom artifice has
come to dominate nature. They cannot help
it, They are made so. In the field of love
they are the real conquerors. Men may
delude themselves with the notion that
they are the winners, but really they are the
Instead of pursuing they are
the led. Instead of being primary they are
only secondary in that gentle quest and en-
counter. Women have the mastery there
and not men. The captives are men and
not women. The victory is the woman's
and not the mans. After his suhjugation
the man has the privilege of pleading for
mercy, and, thank God! he gets it from
feminine grace, little as he may be deserving
of it. He can only plead, but the woman
She Is master of the situation
which he imagines is controlled by himself
alone. Usually, when a woman picks out
man for husband, her hus-
band he is bound to be, and she does not
need to ask him to take the place either
She makes him ask her to be his wife. She
does not give up that advantage, but re-
quires that the formal suing shall be done
by him. She does not ask for favor, but
clv IN i'm ha which
she has awakened in his heart for the pur-
pose Of gratifying it.
We counsel cur fair Poughkeepsie corre-
spondent, therefore, that she will surrender
a priceless feminine privilege II she permits
that advantage to pass over to man. Keep
men in their proper place, Judith, whether 1t
be leap year or any other year. II women
transform them from suppliants into arbters
of their fate, they will grow arrogant when
they should be humble. Don't give them
the chance to refuse your overtures. Hold
that point Of advantage yourselves, we say to
women Make them surrender and then deal
with them as your merciful hearts dictate.
IL they will not come to terms under the
captiyation of your charms, they Will not be
likely to yield to your spoken proposal OF
marriage 1t would al,o fatter them too
much. They would get wholly false con-
ception Of their actual relative place with
reference to women. Make them do the
Let the confession OF subjugation
and the plea for mercy come from them,
while you wait no matter how impatlently,
to bestow upon them the rich guerdon Of