davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20
HuMoR OF THE HOUR.

Bride-Dear Alfred. we must postpone
the wedding
Baron-I don't know if we cant must
ask my oreditors.-Fliegende Batter.
Scotchman visiting church-yard
with friend, pointing to shady, quiet
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20

sDvER-e77s.
LEAD-Brollers', 297lkG3.O5.
Copper-Brokers, II; exchange, 1895
@I125
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20

Your husband painted the house this
spring himself, didn't he?"
We'll. yes, / suppose he got some of
the paint on the house, but you wouldn't
think so if you could see his clothes. -
Buffalo News.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20

The Best He Could Do.-'Frank, dear, .
letter, how do you spell pinochIe?"
Il can't spell it." replied Mr.. Snaggs,
but [ can play t."-Pittsburgh Chron-
icle.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20

Mr.. Pepper-I don't believe there was a
dry eye in the house when the curtain
went down on the third act
Mrs. Pepper-No; but there seemed TO
be the usual number of dry throats.-
Tit-BitS
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20

When er man has is own way" said
Uncle Eben, he's liable ter find fault
jes' de same, case folks didn't grab i'm
an hold i'm ter keep i'm out'n trouble
Washington Star
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20

The Process.-First Citizen-As I un-
derstand it, the mayors may veto meas
ures affecting the cities.
Second Citizen-They may; and then
Plat may veto the mayors.-Puck.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20

Riggs-Hallo. old mani
Briggs-Excuse me, sir; you have the
advantage of me.
Eyes; l guess l have. We were en-
gagged TO the same girl, but you married
her."-Yonkers Statesman.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-05-20
intend being laid if I'm spared."-Tit.

At the Matrimonial Agents.-"Do you
think we shall suit each other2"
"Splendidiyl You possess a very fine
loud voice and she is terribly hard of
hearing. "-Plauderecke.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
POSTAL SAVINGS.

In past years whenever an attempt to
pass postal-savings scheme through Con-
gress failed the cry was raised that the de-
feat represented the influence of the banks.
We have not observed that attention has
been called to any such opposition in the
case of the postal-savings measures which
have been recently introduced in Congress.
The logic of the case is antagonistic to any
assumption of bank opposition, for the
reason that as the interest proposed to be
paid by the Government is much smaller
than that paid by savings banks a postal
saving account would more than likely be
transferred to savings banks after it had
reached size sufficient for bank-account
purposes.
As rule economy and its extreme ex-
preston, penuriousness, are the result of
necessity. Celifornians scorned to use any
coin smaller than 25-cent piece until OPP
portunities for making a great deal of
money with little effort became restricted.
The same rule applies to small savings;
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
THE BICYCLE AND THE RAILROAD.

The great bicycle army of the Empire State
Is in the saddle at Albany, we understand, and
proposes to scOrch through the corridors OF
the Capitol and into the very presence of the
Legislature, prepared to dismount only when
it has secured surrender to its proposition that
the bicycle is baggage so far as the railroads
are concerned. On the other hand we are in
formed that the railroads have steam up and
propose to make no stops until they are face to
face with the enemy, prepared to contest the
right of way through the Legislature on any
such proposition. Here, then, is interest
ing opportunity for collision, the echoes of
which will be heard in the spring, when the
highways and byways of the suburbs are in
condition to WOO the pneumatic tire
1t is an old contest and q wordy one. 1t en-
gagged our attention in the summer and fall, as
1t promises to engage our attention during the
W inter We learn that AssembIyman Arm
strong of Rochester has concealed about him a
bill TO amend section al of chapter 81 of the
laws of the State which relates to the regula-
ton of railroad business, by declaring bicycles
accompanied by owners to be baggage and sub
ject to the same liabilities; the bicycles to be
transported free where the passenger releases
the corporation from such liability, otherwise
charge OF not less than 10 cents, and not to
exceed mills mile, may be authorized.
The contention of the bcyclist in brief is
that he is seldom accompanied by other bag
gage and as he is entitled by his ticket to 100
pounds there is no just reason why his wheel
ShOuld not De carried without charge in
baggage-car. The raiload argues that if BIZ
cycles are to be designated as baggage it will
become necessary for the owners to crate them
so tnat they can be handled as such and piled
up IN the cars; otherwise the companies would
be subjected TO great hardship, for the reason
that bicycles must be treated with great care
and cannot be piled one upon another
They insist that they are justified in levying
an extra charge because only the floor OF car
can be used for these vehicles, thus calling for
the use OF two or more cars where one would
suffice for the same number OF trunks The
same argument is used in the handling of bicy-
q fOr he +L,r+
piled high on the trucks, while the wheels
must be handled separately, greatly increasing
the cost to the railroads
1t viii tn us be seen that each side of the con-
troversy is pretty well intrenched, and we will
await the verdict of legislative wisdom with
the same acute interest that must consume the
wheelmeD. Possibly much will depend upon
the mum Der Of legislators at Albany who pos
seSs bicycleS.-New York Mail and Express
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
AN ALLURING WORD,

Inc various schemes which have been
recently devised for securing the wealth of
gold that all reason teaches US must lie in
the beds of the rivers which come down
from the old hydraulic and placer gold
helus are remindful of the appropriateness
OF the word golden" in its application
10 so many objects and conditions in Cali
lorna, and particularly to the Golden
uate. It's curious fact that yellow is
the predomlnating color in California.
oVershadowlng all other colors is the yell
10" OF the sunshine-a peculiar and dis
llhctlve characteristic of the natural light.
Inc prevalent hue of the soil is yellow
ana IN summer the plains are carpeted
Win the most gorgeous of all yellow
mowers, the amapota, or eschscholtzia, or
Oall1ornla poppy, as ones jaw may be best
ntted to the name; and the gold of our
mines is more yellow than that which any
other part of the world has ever produced
except ancient Etruria.
Inc conhguration of major California
olscloses two great valleys forming a con-
tlnuoas plain 800 miles long and sixty
miles VIDE, besides q number of smaller
VaIleys draining to the common basin into
"hlch the two great valleys pour their
yellow wealth. This place of common
assembly is the bay of San Francisco and
the bay opens to the great ocean through
the Golden Gate. Through this gateway,
so happily named. flows the great yellow
treasure in Infinite variety, but nearly
always yellow, to every corner of the earth.
through the long years of gold-mining
IN the area which drains through the
Golden Gate there has been carried down
constantly stream of gold which the me-
chanlcal genius of men has not been able
to lmpound. 1t lies strewn along the beds
OF the rivers, 1t freights the bottom of the
bay OF San Francisco, it adds to the rigid
! lty OF the bar that guards the Golden Gate
IN WIDE segment of circle twenty miles
TO sea. During inconceivable ages preced-
ing the era of gold mining the streams had
been carrying down this precious treasure
and depositing it wherever it could find a
resting place. Wherever the lava cap COW
erlng the beds Of the ancient gold bea ring
rivers had been worn away the rains had
washed out the gold and sent it down th e
streams and out through the Golden Gate.
Everything that works to the dislodging
and developing of the natural resourc es
that lie IN the soil of the yellow plains and
underneath the russell of the hills and
mountains back of them partakes of the
color and value of gold. This must all
pass through San Francisco to be prepared
and refined and made useful, and in that
fact resides the coming greatness of the
CITY
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
WANTED-A VOLCANO.

A valued correspondent, whose imagina-
ton has been fired by the news that Kill
auea, the famous Hawaiian volcano, is
again active, writes to secure the opinion
of THE CALL on The proba bility OF renewed
activity in one or more of the ancient vol
canoes which constitute such remarkable
features of the topography of California,
ard expresses a hope that such happen
ing will occur to add to the already long
list of the States attractions. He in
geniously argues that sin Mexico we have
active volcanoes to the left of us, in Alaska
an active volcano to the right of US, in the
Sandwich Islands an active volcano in
front of US, and at home many desolate
and dreary old craters that sit sullen, de-
crepid and silent"
1t is in the nature of all things earthly to
be born, to live and to die, This is as true
of WITNESSES humors and forms of badinage
as OF races, dynasties and volcanoes Read
ing the story of the rocks of California we
find that our great volcanoes have been
slumbering for longer time thar Vesu-
vius and Etna were ever known to remain
asleep, and this gives us cause to despair
of their awakening. Since scientists have
disposed, in a rather high-handed manner.
Of the connection between volcanoes and
earthquakes, which may crack badly built
houses, 1t might be pleasant to have
Shasta, or Lassens Peak, or st. Helena
''belch forth fire, smoke and lava" but it
is sufficiently interesting to reflect on the
wonderful things that our volcanoes did
while they were in business.
The greatest of them all was Shasta, but
the most wonderful was st. Helena, which
is so near San Francisco that il may be
seen from the higher eminences about the
City. While Shasta, commencing on q
plain 5000 feet above the level of the sea,
built beautiful symmetrical cone nearly
$4,000 feet above the plain, st. Helena re-
versed the course of a river and created a
petrifed forest. And this, in the slow
fashion of geology in telling its tales, was
only the other day-that is to say, many
thousands of years ago.
In the early days, before Dana saw ante
| lope come down to the waters edge on the
Marin shore and gaze curiousIy at the
ship which passed through the Golden
Gate with the author of 1.-TWO Years Be-
fore the Mast" Russian River flowed
| almost directly westward to the sea. About
the same time the volcano emitted an in
conceivable amount of ashes, which sifted
through and completely buried a forest of
redwoods near Calistoga. The ashes piled
far above the tree SUBMITS, and in the
course of the ages the trees were siiicified.
Then came the eroding rains, washing the
ashes away and leaving the stone trees
standing till an earthquake overturned and
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19

they are not likely to be made by prosper
Gus persons. At the same time it is we'll
to teach children the Importance of say
ing, and hence it is in the education of the
young that postal-saving institution
would have one of its highest uses.
The best plan in operation in Europe
may be illustrated by using the names of
American coins in describing it. A person
may deposit sum as small as cent. An
account is opened with him.. For his cent
he is given card divided into ten COM
partments, each the size of a one-cenU
stamp, and cent stamp which the post
master affixes to the card. For ten cents
the entire card is thus filled, and IN ex-
change for it the depositor receives card
divided into ten compartments, each de-
signed to receive ten ten-cent stamps.
Upon surrendering his one-cent card he is
given ten-cent card with one of the COM
partments filled with ten-cent stamp
When this card is filled he surrenders it
and receives another card divided into ten
compartments, but each represents ST. and
one of the compartments is filled with a
81 stamp in exchange for the filled ten-cent
card which he has surrendered. The next
card has $40 compartments.
The system is so simple that any child can
understand it, our decimal system making
it peculiarly applicable to this country.
Whether or not any of the bills before
Congress embody this plan we are not
informed, but if not it should be presented,
and the measure could find no more suita-
bic advocates than the great labor organi-
cations of the country.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
THE NATIONAL CONVENTIONS.

The contest among the larger cities of
the East for the Democratic National Con-
Ventlon became, toward the close, rivalry
between Chicago and st. Louis, and re-
suited IN the success Of the former. The
result is regarded as something of VIC
tory for the gold wing of the party. Ger
tain it is that the New York influence,
when it was found impossible to carry the
convention to that city, was exerted on
behalf of Chicago, and as New York is de-
voted to the gold interest, it is not likely
that her choice between the rival cities
was determined solely by geographical
considerations.
Now that the calls for both of the great
National conventions have been issued,
Presidential politics will rapidly increase
in interest until ii becomes the absorbing
issue of the time. 1t Sc ems evident that
we are to have a campaign widely differ
ent from any that have taken place since
the war. The breaking up of the Solid
South is but one of the many proofs of the
changed conditions that politicians and
statesmen will have to confront in making
the canvass. Along with these changes in
conditions there will be changes in the
issues that are to be discussed, and ac-
cordingly, the campaign will have the
interest of novelty added to that OF the
usual excitement of oratory and process
sions.
1t Is satisfactory to note that all the
changes which have taken place either in
conditions or in issues have been strength
ening to the Republican party. The break
in the solid South, that stronghold of
RNnrhOn hoc
complete than the break in Democracy it.
self. The very fact that the selection of
site for holding the National Convention
was regarded as a contest between rival
factions of the party is an evidence of how
far the factional divisions are carried, and
how easy it is to rouse them to antagonism
on any subject upon which the party as
whole is called upon to decide and to act.
Both conventions will in all probability
be unusually exciting this year, but there
will be wide difference between the two
in the causes of the excitement, and that
difference will illustrate the contrast that
exists between. the conditions of the par
ties themselves. In the Republican Con-
vention there will be harmony in the max
ing Of the platform, and the interest will
lie in the struggle to decide among many
able leaders as to which shall be chosen
for the Presidency. In such a contest
there will be much yigor and much enthu-
slasm, but no sign of those dissenSions
that weaken party at the beginning of g
campaign. Very different will be the con-
tests that will rage in the Democratic Con-
yention. No great popular leaders viii vie
with one another for victory there The
contests will be over the principles of the
platform, and if they end without causing
the convention to break up in confusion it
will be only because one faction or the
other is willing to carry compromises to
the verge of subserviency.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
THE CONVENTION.

The convention of yesterday did its
work promptly and did 1t well. 1t
was at once aggressive and conserva-
tive. It did all that was needed to
attest Californias earnest opposition to
any form of funding scheme and did not
weaken the strength and justice of that
position by attempting to go further. The
action taken and the resolutions adopt
ed can be ratified and Endorsed by
men of all shades of opinion. They
do not undertake to declare what the Gov
eminent should do With the road after the
defeat of the rounding scheme. They de-
mand simply the enforcement of the law
against the railroad plutocrats as against
the poorest citizen, and that is all Callfor
MIA asks or needs for her welfare and
prosperity.
A convention of this kind may be in full
truthfulness said to be representative of
the people of the State. 1t was meeting
OF business men called to consider a
matter of most important business to the
public, who proceeded to perform their
work with a business-like precision and
directness. It stuck strictly to the task
before it and turned aside for no other
issue whatever. Even those who may have
wished the convention had gone further
will certainly support it as far as it
did 60. We are among those who hold
that it went far enough--thatitd did exactly
the right thing in the right way with the
right spirit and at the right time.
The whole tenor of the resolutions from
the first whereas" to the closing express
sion of resolve is honest. virile, straight
forward and just. They enter a solemn
protest against any Tefunding bill what
ever and they request of the Govern
ment the beginning of foreclosure
proceedings at once. This is all that need:
to be done at this luncture. New prob
lens may arise in the future, but these
can be dealt with in the future
The issue now is clearly embodied
in the resolutions. There remains tt
the people the plain duty of supporting
the work of the convention by cooperating
vigorously with the committee appointed
to carry it on. The prospects are pro
pitious. The people are united, the cause
is Just, able leaders are to the front, and
with resolute action the victory will b.
Ours
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
AROUND THE CORRIDORS

81 say, there must be a reason for every
thing. Don't you knowW
MI Darlington then lapsed into silence and
renewed work on portrait of Judge McKin-
stry, upon which he was engaged.
"Do you know''-another touch on his
Honor's eye-"why art is in such bad way
here in"-puts one brush in his mouth and
tries another-"San Francisco?"
"Why?" inquired the visitor mechanically
"Why? Because the people do not under
stand it. Yes; that's why. Dear me, my lad,
no other cause"
whats to be done in the matter?'
"Umph. Simple enough. Give US public art
galleries All, excuse me. Give them art
galleries. I say. That was but a bit of play.
you know. However"-another long silence.
during which Mr.. Darlington painted vigor-
ously-"as was about to say, there is reason
for everything. AS a matter of fact, though,
on second thought l said that once before.
Well"-squints at the portrait methodically-
"that is the reason we, or rather they, know SO
little about art'
what Is the reason?"
because we have no galleries In which to
educate them. Look here,' and the artist put
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
HUMOR OF THE HOUR.
Dies the ipsurgent yell!
The Cubans all are routed;
Away they fee pell-mell-
N nntnnnnn Gnnira taaiar dnu nf q

Dies the ipsurgent yell
The Cubans all are routed;
Away they fee pell-mel-
An outcome Spain meier doubted.
What, no! change is flashed
And Spains distress is dire
Her final hope is dashed
The Cubans hold the wire
The disappearance of DR.. Fritz friedman
from Berlin has caused a sensation in Ger
many. Friedman was q great criminal law
yer and made $50, 900 year from his profes-
sion. He was however, always in financial
difficulties. He made speech at banquet
one night recently and has not been seen since.
Maude-Young Higgins engagement was a
very short one.
Mabel-Is it broken already?
at was broken the very night he proposed"
''You don't say.'
yes; you see Higgins shutters frightfully,
ana 1t took him nearly twenty minutes to pro-
pose, and after he got through the girl spoiled
everything by exclaiming This is SO sudden
Auggins thought she was guying him
1onkers Statesman,
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
PERSONAL.

John S. McMillen of Roche Harbor Wash.
arrived here Yesterday
General Manager Kruttschnitt of the
Southern Pacific has returned from trip over
the Shasta route.
EX-Judge F. T. Baldwin of Stockton, who has
been unwell for several weeks at the Palace is
still improving. 1t is expected he will soon be
able to leave the hotel
c. H. speers, for six years past assistant pas
senger agent Of the Atlantic and Pacific, has
resigned, the resignation TO take effect Feb
ruary 1. Mr.. Speers returned from Chicago
yesterday
Casper Whitney, for long time connected
with Harper's Weekly q writer, principally
on sporting matters, is on his way here from
New York. He is a member of the Amateur
Athletic Union the United States.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19

most sensible. This may be made very pretty
by making the large collar of lawn, or the coll
lar may be of colored batlste, which washes
very well.
Very elaborate gowns of nalnsook are tucked
down the front or trimmed with narrow lnser-
ton.
This same shape is seen in misses loungng-
robes, which may be OF any material from the
with flannel.
A dainty gown of pink flannel had the large
collar OF white batiste trimmed with narrow
edoe of Valerciennes lace and insertion to
match brought but half an inch from the
edge. ~.
An outing flannel of blue with white stripes
had round collar of white CHINA SILK, edged
with ruffe of lace.
Another of wool challie with yellow flower
on white ground had collar OF yellow emma
silk with lawn and insertion of Valenciennes
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19

California. In Texas he bought thousands OF
acres at nominal prices, and with the advance
in land values became immensely wealthy.
He is now bank director in Austin, Tex. But
among strangers he set himself assiduously to
learn reading and writing, and succeeded
splendidly."
KeIleher put up at the Lick House while
visiting San Francisco The clerk wrote his
name incorrectly upon the register.
That's not right" Kelleher remarked CURLY.
"Will you please correct it?" asked the clerk
~ don't care how it's spelled in California !;
that's good enough-we'll let it go at that"
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1896-01-19
A LAUGH IN CHURCH.

She sat on the sliding cushion,
The dear, woman OF four;
II er feet, in their shiny slippers,
Hung dangling over the floor.
She meant 10 be good-she had promised
And so, W It'll her big, brown eyes,
She stared at the Westinghouse WINDOWS
And counted the crawling flies.
She looked far up at the preacher,
But she thought of the honey-beeS
Droning away at the blossoms
That whitened the cherry trees.
She thought OF a broken basket
Where. curled in dusky heap,
Three sleek, round puppies, with fringy ears,
Lay Struggled and fast asleep.
Such soft, warm bodies to cuddle,
such queer little hearts TO beat
such swift, round tongues to kiss,
Such sprawling, cushlony feet.
She could feel in her clasping finger
The touch of the Satiny skin,
And cold. wet nose exploring
The dimples under her chin.
Then sudden ripple Of laughter
Ran over the parted lips
So quick that she could not catch IL
With her rosy fnger-tips
The people whispered, "Bless the child"
AS each one walked from nap,
But the dear, wee woman hid her face
For shame in her mothers lap.
London Amusing Journal.