New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1896-11-08

her. am beaten. cannot Full myself together
again. In spite Of the fact that nave gone over
this whole thing again and again-her love ana
mine. and the end-I cannot race the Ola assoc'-
atoms nor her. My future Is about all can
face now. / wonder whether or not she cares. II
she misses the old days? If she misses me! ~
her life is as complete? II she thinks OF me?
I am goaded to desperation by the old truisn'
repeating itself forever in my thoughts. Brief
as womans love" Mans Is enduring enough.
June IL.
II hell Is a place Of torture. was In 1t last
night Any one who has been there knows what
/ mean At any former time under other cir
cumstances it would have been heaven. / re-
read all Rosamonds notes and letters-those
dear letters that have been read and reread ne
fore. and kissed again and again. Letters so iuil
of tenderness and self-surrender. o, passion ana
love for me and burned them. l made a
packet of her pi.tLres. excepting the miniature
she gave me month ago, and addressed IL 10
her. Then spent the night with detached SEN
fences from her letters repeating themselves IN
my brain.
have turned my back upon the world-for she
was all the world to me. ] suppose it Is the cow
ard In my nature that has asserted itself. and re-
fuses to try to be brave without the same inspi-
ration. With her. could have conquered worlds.
though. to be truthful. about all cared to DO
was to dawdle at her feet. Those days are
gone And, since the light Of her eyes Is with
held from me, dare say my steps may turn
downward.
Third day out.
Rather a monotonous voyage. Not many peo-
pie one would know crossing as late as this The
weather has been fairly good. though there Is a
dox, Hicby akpci
on deck However there is one little passenger
who does not seem to mind the weather II the
wind does blow. Most women dislike blowy
days. the wind disarranges their hair So but
when a breeze only adds to a girls charm. she
would be foolish to object to dshevelled APP
pearance This little brunette has such soft,
pretty locks that toss about Ner forehead and
curl about her ell the more bewitchingly
when driven by the gale.
Fourth day.
Her name is Betty Raymond. 1t suits her so
we'll, she is such bright. coquettsh. dainty lit
tie creature. Her mother is sort Of Invalid.
and I found could be OF use to them In moving
her steamer chair to more sheltered place this
morning.
Four days out. Four days away from home
and Rosamond. But do not like to think about
it. 1t is a mans duty to be self-reliant and
Fifth day.
Mrs Raymond bowed to me so cordially that
crossed the deck to talk with her. The weather
Is decidedly nasty, but Betty does not seem to
mind It, Her hair only curls the prettier in the
mist and dampness. which makes decided con-
trast to the stringy locks of the other women
It makes them look grumpy. Weather unfavor'
able to wel-curled fringes Is one of the things
usual woman cannot rise above. l am positive
that Betty is coquette. and very charming
one. too. She has wonderful purplish blue eyes
and long curling lashes, white skin and dusky
hair. She has, in fact. bewiderng way Of sud
denly looking a man full in his eyes. then as sud
denly look down. that the long lashes positive
" shadow her cheeks. Rosamond was always
above feminine tricks. Well she die not need
them
In few more hours voyage will be over
and am to continue my wanderings. Last
night Mrs Raymond gave me permission 10 take
Betty on deck. and We walked up and down, UP
and down, In the mist. She wore the collar OF
her ulster turned up to the tips Of her ears. so
that a part Of the pretty curls were imprisoned
One strand Of hair blew about In very riotous
fashion and touched my cheek-but / do not
think that she conscious Of 1t. 1t was really
quite pleasant-the walk. l mean-and helped
me forget the bitter past. We talked OF all
sorts Of things She is very clever. Then we
went downstairs and she brought me volume
Of sonnets to read to her. 1t choked me little
for they were the very ones used to read to
Rosamond last summer. There was one
fancied could never read to any one else
queer Betty should have chosen IT,
June %
We said goodby to-day. and am about to
cities. cathedrals and art galleries. 1t is not a
very blithesome thing to do. considering the fact
that it was with Rosamond l expected to
them this summer. Mrs. Raymond and Betty
go to Holland. They hoped We should meet
again. but we probably shall not, for were
only birds Of passage together.
August II.
There has been little to WRITE In spite Of the
fact that several weeks have gone by. l find 1t
rather dreary by myself. and often wish l had
taken advantage of Mrs RaymOnd's suggestion
to spend month in Holland. l am tempted to
go to Antwerp. as they may have gone there
from Dordrecht by this time. though should
probably miss them 1t was so imbecile Of me
not to know their address and plans more def
nitely. Still 1t is without doubt a matter OF in
difference to them whether 1 join them stay
here In Wiesbaden.
Antwerp. August 20.
Well well, this Is luck! Whom should meet
to-day In the Plantn Court but Betty with. l
regret TO say, German count d. E. Won Statt |
think she said. He glared at me- and well he
might for Betty's greeting very cordial,
and l fancied the surprise-coud 1t have been
pleasure?-brought a dash of red to her checks
Then Mrs. Raymond seemed suddenly to ap-
pear from the midst of the vines and we all
wandered around together for q delightful hour
August 81.
All, me! Summer is nearly over. am sorry
Antwerp il certainly a most charming old place.
1 could linger here for months provided the DAYS
went as agreeably as these last two 1t helps
me forget the unpleasant past l only wish I