Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1896-08-05

Wellington Star
Watts-'I wonder what kind of
shirts these can be that are advertised
for 20 centsY Potts-"Married mems"
indianapolis Journal.
Callers-"Are the ladies at home"
Bridget examining their cards.
"Sure, am, it isn't them that lives
here-it's the McAdamses. Life.
Tommy-"My pa says It's a sin to
swear" Johnny-"Huh! | guess your
pa never tried to explain politics to
your ma."-Philadelphl North Ameri-
can.
Jim Senn-"Why do they call money
the long green?" Joe Cose-"Nega-
lively, l suppose because without 1t
you are short and blue. '-Philadelphia
North American.
Everyby-"This rain is a good thing
for the country, isn't it?" Neyerby-
ooh, 1 don't know about that. Just
look at what it's done to my straw
hatP'-Roxbury Gazette.
II like summer; my wife is always
$50 Is mine; 1t must be because all the
progressive euchre clubs have shut
down."-Chicago Record.
Then folks from town didn't stay
much of spell, Uncle Reub" NAV;
went back mad cause we didn't hev
no cycle paths an 'lectric lights in Their
blackberry patch."-Chicago Record
Hicks-I saw your poem in the paper
last week. How did you get your pull
with the editor? Wicks-Oh, | didn't
bother the editor, l called upon the
business anager.-Somervill Journal.
Mrs. Snobbs-"How many girls do
the Newlies keep Mrs. Nobbs-"0nly
one." Mrs. Snobbs-"Only one? Good
gracious, and | came pretty near call
ing there yesterday Cleveland Lead
er.
Husband-I expect some friends of
mine this evening, and | must go out
and buy some cigars. Wife-Why, l
thought you bought some for them. II
did, but forgot to get any for myself"
Life.
"Dah's one ting Shore" said Uncle
Eben, "'bout all desher accidents da's
gwineter happen long oh de Fohth er
July. Dab ain nobody kin say dey
didn' know twas loaded Washing
ton Star.
The merchant Ito his daughters suit
or)-"Now, how are you fixed financial
ly% The suitor-"Well, l have no
debts" The merchant-"What a pityi
Then cannot give you my daughter"
Sketch.
Mrs. Wallace-Here again, see Why
don't you settle down to work? Perry
Patetic-Ma'am, l would, but somehow
l was always too ambitious to come
down to worl<in fer day wages.-Cln-
cinnat Enquirer.
Horatius the good one)-Pa says If
I'm real good he'll take me to the cir
Gus. Thomas (the bad one)-Aw, rats.
Yer amt got no brudders ner sisters
do ez yer please. Yer de on'y excuse
he's got.-Judge.
II am glad to see you looking so much
better than when l met you last, Miss
Quickstep." "Why, when was that, Mr..
Spoonamore? Last Thursday, ON the
boulevard. You were riding a bicycle"
Chicago Tribune.
what did the stranger say when you
gave him the bill?" Waiter-Such mon
strous prices he never saw; we were
ar abominable gang of thieves. Hotel
keeper-Goodl SO he didn't become
abusive, en?-Fliegende Blaetter.
Wardpull-I believe 1t would be n
good idea to nominate Bzskpxsl1l. He's
a mighty good man. Heclah-Oh, he's
a good man all right, but how could we
ever get up campaign yell on such a
name as that ?-Indlanapolis Journal.
Mistress Ito servant looking for n
place)-Why don't you show your book
of references? Seryant-Because l do
not wish to reflect on the character of
the employers who change their SER
wants every Acknowledgements Blaet-
ter.
Tyre-Bilkins and his wife have
bought bicycle built for two. Rider
All! Riding tandem, Ell? Tyre-Well;
Judging from their webbing perform
ance yesterday, should say they were
Just riding at random.-Philadelph
North American.
Here comes that Miss Flighty with
her loud skirt. The hateful thingw
II don't see anything loud about her
skirt" "Heavens! Can't you hear that
rustleT christmas! l would give $40
extra for rustic in a skirt like that
San Francisco Wave.
Kate-Mame Carson is terribly mash
ed on Charley Sweetser. Edith--Nhat
makes you think so? Kate-Why, he
has been three weeks trying to teach
her to ride wheel, and she doesn't
make the least progress. The very in
slant he let's so of her she falls Off
Boston Transcript
"Well, after dinner Boresome told a
story about his exploits in Africa and
then one about an Irishman he met In
Switzerland" "But thought you were