Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1896-05-14

DOUy engaged III IL, from the SCRUB WO-
man who uses so much water that it
spoils the ceiling beneath, to the master
of the house, who eats his breakfast on
a table covered with the flotsam and
jetsam of the household furniture and
comes home at noon to find that he is
compelled to sit in the yard. Every
body quarrels with his nearest neigh
bor and the idea Of the unity and har-
mony of labor is shivered into frag
ments by the experience Of spring
cleaning The Congoese who is doing
the spading is always ready to pull his
razor on the Zulu who is withdrawing
the side fence, the difficulty commonly
arising from the earth being scattered
on the newly spread whitewash, this
DETACHMENT of his job being keenly re-
scented by the knight of the brush.
The timer and the painter invaria bly,
fall out, for the latter always wants to
work on that side of the house which
the former has chosen for the scene Of
his labors; the two ladders come in con-
flict, and much language unfit for pub
LEGATION is shed. Sometimes the she'd
ding extends also to the paint, for after
affairs have reached a climax, and the
Safeguarding has arrived at point
where the painter has been outdone,
he catches up a brush from pot of
red paint and throws it at the timer
OF course it hits him just under the
ear and spatters all over his neck and
equally Of course, he grabs red-hOt
iron from his furnace and takes after
the painter, who fees while the timer
pursues, giving the impression of a
man with his throat cut seeking ven
geance on the murderer. Away they
60 down the street, and the other
house-cleaners rush out, look after
them, and three or four blocks away
see crowd with policeman's he'll
met bobbing about in the middle of it,
and know that the offenders are in the
grasp of an ever-vigilant minion of the
law. But they do not stay there, for,
in all probability, they come back to
their work the next morning smoking
their pipes in the best Of humOr, having
explained to the sergeant that they
were housekeeping. and that official
being prepared, from experience, to I'M
derstand both the provocation and the
situation.
The natural enemy Of the paperhang-
er is the carpenter. No matter where
the paper-hanger goes to hang paper,
thither also goes the carpenter, for in
every room where paper is to be hung,
by some singular fatality, there is
either door to be repaired, or win
dow out of joint, or dashboard that
needs to come up and be put down
again And the paperhanger always
wants the door shut just at the time
the carpenter wants it open, or the
carpenter always wants to work at the
washboard just after the paper man
has moved his bench to that. side of the
room, or the man of rolls and paste de-
sires to paste and spread above the
window that the carpenter is just about
to take out, so the mistress Of the es-
adjustment is kept in constant panic
lest one should brain the other, which
would be just terrible, you know, be-
sides missing the door.
Side issues are constantly arising.
The man who is doing the piastering
always walks over the floor that has
just been scrubbed; of course he could
not walk anywhere else; he would go
half block out Of his way to leave the
tracks of his limy brogans on that new
" cleansed surface, and when he is
ccoIdod for his careIeSSneSS reyengeS
himself by swearing at the man who is
putting in new gas pipe, who, in turn.
curses the plumber for laying water
pipe so as to compel an extra turn in
the gas conduit. The women who
scrub grumble at the cook who does
not heat the water hot enough for their
use, and so it goes on, the whole house
being filed with cursing and bitterness
until the calamity is overpast.
There is an awful lot OF enthusiasm
wacfnd m dead-hOrSe projects.