The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1896-02-19
CRANES In WASHINGTON.
DeIusions OF Some Visitors at the White
House.
Nep York Sun.

q - "a -
White House this week by the watch
men at the door. One Of them was an
old fellow with an imaginary grievance.
with whom the officers had not much
difficulty, but the other, an insane
convict from somewhere up in Penn.
sylvania, gave the officers a tussle
after he was put in the patrol wagon,
but was landed in the station house
at last.
Washington seems to have a pecu'
liar attraction for these unfortunate
creatures, who come here from al
parts Of the country with the vain
hope Of arising their grievances before
the Congress or the President. Pub
lie men are getting used to them, fol
all have had more or less experience
with demented and disappointed Office
seekers and with the promoters Of use
less schemes and inventions Sc
many are the classes of cranks, sc
many are the disappointed inventors
and Office seekers at the end of Their
tether, with minds perpetually harp
ing upon n subject, that it is diff
cult to say where the m0nomaniat
ends and the crank begins. But, from
the standpoint Of the doorkeepers ano
guards of the public Offices, the former
are worse in a way than the latter,
The crazy man, unless he is violent
| can easily be put off. Not so the man
with one idea. He will persist, il
spite Of continuous Disappointment
and even hunger-not to say thirst.
in besieging The st~rongholds Of the
Administration in the pursuit Of hi
favorite project.
The guards at the White House are
bury fellows. They are the best men
in the police force Of the city, detail
ed for this especial work because Of
their peculiar fitness. There are siz
Of them, in three details, who keep q
continuous guard over the main en-.
trance of the White House day and
night throughout the year. So long
have they acted as %doorkeepers and
guards Of the President that they are
more than ordinarily skilled in the
reading of human character. They
have White House visitors divided ur
into a number Of different groups.
They profess to know and be known
personally by the President and hia
personal and official family, the Cabi.
net officers, and che members Of. Con
gress. They can tell visitor from
out of town or a newly married couple,
forty or fifty of whom visit the White
House every day, a block away, and
they know almost every class Of We:
hicle in town, from the, funkeyed
brougham of the British ambassado,
to the shabby four-wheeler Of the
Pennsylvania avenue Jehu.
All the newspaper men and the sub
ordinate officers Of the Government,
too, are known to them, SO that the
sizing up of a crank is a matter Of "a
very few minutes. He usually wan.
ders up to the portico Of the White
House in a shifty nervous manner,
gazing ~vacantly around and bebraying
his nature to the very watchful eyes
of those at the door. When the door
is opened be is closely questioned as
to his business. Unless all the ques-
tions are answered in a s%traightfor.
ward way he lis emphatically turned
down. Sometimes the fellows show
fight, when they are forcibly elected
and thrown out into the drive. II
generally does not take more than one
of the big Watchmen to accomplish
this, except where the intruder isvery
! violent. The men at the door are
most diplomatic. The crank who
walks in with buster and insists on
seeing the President on the ground
that he is an American citizen, and as
much entitled to the use Of the White
House as any one, is quietly but firm,
ly reasoned with, and more often than
not the guards succeed in getting him
away by peaceful means. If he makes
any warlike demonstrations, however,
the touch of a finger OF an ELECTRIC
button calls the patrol wagon Of the
3rd precinct, where Lieut.. Boyle holds
the prisoner until an inquiry can be
made into his sanity by the physicians
of police. If he is adjudged insane
he is sent across the river to St. Eliza.
beth's Asylum, or turned over to his
friends, if he has any. Often, though,
by a profession of repentance and de-
sire to get out of town, the crank OBJ
taius his discharge from custody.
The religious cranks who visit the
White House are many. A short
while ago one Of them went there With
a large tin box under his arm, which
he said contained o new kind of reli-
gion. He wanted the President to see
it in order that a proclamation might
be issued to the American public de-.
claring it universal. There was moth.
ing in the box whatever, and after
being gently reasoned with the crank
departed, his mission unful6lled. One
night a strange man stole up the .por-
tico, and, opening the door himself,
stuck his head in and shouted at the
top of his voice. "This is my house,
get out!'' and then rar away. he re-
turned after a short while and repeat
ed the performance, and, much to his
disgust, was hustled off, according 20
his mind, with more vigor than the
occasion demanded. During President
Harrison's administration a religious
crank appeared who succeeded in see,
ing Major Halford, then the Presi.
dents private secretary. He claimed
that re was the advance agent Of the
Messiah, and was trying to raise
enough money to erect a shrine or
altar in Washington, about which all
the Christians Of the world in the
days to come could kneel and worship.
Not often do cranks get past the
first two doorkeepers. If the guards
of this door fail to notice any signs OF
dementia, the crank is obliged to pass
another door at the foot Of the stairs
leading up to the Presidential Offices,
where again they are confronted by
two messengers and a doorkeeper be-
fore they a see even the Presidents
private secretary. No persons except
the Cabinet officers are allowed to &C
into the Cabinet room, adjoining the
Presidents private Office, unannounc.