The record-union., 1896-08-09

and generation Will go Tor the accom-
plishment of a little sport, or to carry
out practical joke is almost beyond
credulity. This was illustrated in a
very amusing fashion the other day.
Tt was in the Office of a prominent ply
sician of this city, where two lads, both
under twenty-five or thereabout, are
employed The doctor was out, and as
one Of the boys was busy at his accounts
the other, firing of the monotony of
nothing to do, curled himself up in the
operating chair with the most dolce for
niente air of luXuriant ease imaginable,
and was soon locked in the arms of
Morpheus. Presently his regular
breathing fell on the silent air of the
room in distinct evidence that he had
safely reached the shores of dream
land and boy No. l, an innocent look
ing chap as you'd ever expect to meet
anywhere, with his cherubic blue eyes
and golden hair, turning his head from
the books over which he was busily en-
ployed, caught sight of the sleeper. and
with a half-audible chuckle arose,
girded up his loins and quickly proceed
ed to burn a cork over the gas jet. Hav-
ing done this to his entire satisfaction.
he noiselessly approached the sluggard,
and with the lightest Of touches, admin
istered with deft fingers. adorned that
peaceful countenance with embellish
ments horribly warlike in character and
appearance. This done he went quickly
back to his books as If nothing had hap
Dened. Indeed, so quiet was the place,
save for the loud, insistent buzz of a
blue bottle fly, which was making fran
tic efforts to escape through a wire
screen in one Of the large windows,
thereby humping his foolish head and
causing him to emit a series of angry
and disgusted buzzes, and the scratch
Of the blonde lads pen as he industri-
ously conned his accounts, one would
have been convinced that all was and
had been peaceful as a May morning,
with no cloud to mar the serenity of the
landscape. FiVe-ten-fifteen minutes
elapsed, and at last comes tap-tap of
a woman's heels along the hall, stop
ping before the door, when an impera-
tive little rap arouses the sleeper at
once into action. He bounds from his
chair. rubs his eyes vigorously with his
knuckles (alas. poor youth! why had no
ministering spirit warned theeD, and
all politeness and attention Ga particu-
person), he opens the door and bows low
before a little woman who stands there.
Her eyes dilate at the unwonted spec
tacle presented to her astonished gaze,
and covering her mouth with her hand
kerchief in rather spasmodic fashion,
she seems TO follow something,
as for half a second she regards him
with that strange look in her eyes She
essayed to speak and again smothered
queer little sound in the folds of her
friendly handkerchief.
DO you wish anything, madam
asked the lad firmly, and in tones cal
culated to make an inpression-he had
by this time begun to believe he had a
nanaic to deal with.
.'N-no. thanks-I-that isis the doc
tor in?" she at last managed to articu-
late between gasps.
NO. madam, he is not in at present
viii be in about half an hour" he re-
sponded politely, If a tri1e coolly, then
opening the office door a little further
asked, "Will you waltz"
NO. I guess not this time-I mean.
of course-that is, 1 meant to say no,
thank you. II much prefer to-to
come back again. she replied, con-
fusedly, and TO say the least, discon-
0ectedly, under the folds of her hand
kerchief. as she swiftly retreated, leav-
ing the now discounted youth gazing
after her with perplexity in every line
of his disflgured and blacker ed coun-
fenance. and through all a vague i'm
preston that he had been laughed at.
He. the polite attentive assistant OF DR..
-; why should anyone laugh at
hin9 That was the question that trou-
bled him as he. turning, re-entered the
Office. Slamming the door till the
globes on the gas jets ratified, he turned
TO his blonde companion and demanded
ferociously. what the d-l ails that
woman. anyhow"
Without turning his head the blonde
replied incoherently: 'Dunno-guess
she must have thought she saw-some-
g-ah-funny, you know"
Il don't know" responded No. 2,
savagely. and I'm sure there's moth
ing funny about me: she was looking
right at me, man alive, and I'm sure
she was laughing. Dash 1t all! say
look here, now, what's wrong with me
-necktie crooked, eh?"
Before the blonde lad was placed In
the embarrassing position which then
threatened. without time for further
consideration of the matter. the sound
CT girlish voices in animated conversa-
ton reached them through the open
transom, and a loud double knock at
the same time demanded admittance.
Smoothing his well kept hair and fran
tically adjusting the supposed recreant