Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1896-06-27
SHORT STORIES BY M. QUAD
Story of an Umbrella.

Story of an Umbrella.
The man with the yellow goatee meant to
ride several blocks further, but, catching
sight of a friend on the sidewalk he llur-
riedly left the car, and his umbrella was
left leaning against the front door, AS
many as dozen passengers took notice of
his heedlessness. and of the six or seven
without umbrellas every one decided to
secure the estray for himself 1t took cheek
to walk up to it. but red-headed man
finally arose. looked around the car and
then advanced to the front door and looked
out, at the same time grasping the handle
of the umbrella. AS he turned to make his
way out of the car. a man smilingk said:
Excuse me. please, but shall need my
umbrella when 1 get off the car"
1T Is. sir
Look here" said third man. as he half
rose up. its a mighty queer thing that 1
can't Jet 60 OF my umbrella without some
You don't claim this?" queried the man
| who had it.
Certainly 1 do
why, IT S my Identical umbrella y, pasped
the second man.
"Ah. there, don't walk off with that!' put
in fourth I've lost about a dozen um-
brellas on this line this year, and am get
left it, will your"
MOT much he WON'T" exclaimed fifth
man. There is a law in this state to nun
lsh umbrella thieves, and I'll see that it's
enforced II this thing goes too far Why
don't you pick my pockets for a changer"
NOW, then" said the red-headed man.
you can play no game on me! | guess I
know an umbrella which I've carried for sly
months. Every one of YOU must have sann
me stand 1t up against the door as l came
in ~
chorus. 0'Ae'' III
Then m liar am 1? Then I'm would
be thief. am I? don't want no row. but
Al TINS moment the man who owned and
ha lne umbrella boarded the car. after
not run, and. advancing up the aisle he
mark: "-i 'Ae ie
That's like ua-aIu,,r, ,, >,
hind" "'"s IL pe-
Jest so, sir-expected YOU back for - ="
said the red-headed man. ~
Yes, expected you back" added No. Q
Yes, It's his umbrella" chorused the
=! was almost afraid it would be gone
said the loser. as he backed out
on. no; no! no" exclaimed the disput
ants together. We knew it was yours and
We're saving it for you!, anu
Wrecked by Cigar,
Thanks. but never accept cigars from
any one, said the man with the yaller whis-
hers as ne waved the case away. Its an
ldiom OF mine, and I hope you won't be
offended
AFRAID OF poison?" queried the other.
On no, no. l had a little adventure with
cigar once upon a time, and 1 don't mind
reiating IT. Our firm in Chicago was after
a big contract down the state and u,,s
sent down to Springfield to work a certain
man VINO would throw the Job our way As
luck would have it, I met him on the train
ana as we were both Smokers We tailed
yer the our r. cigars. L accepted one of his on
NI-ah n1 <,,s..l
handed out my case. There was met tI,o
cigars in 1t. One was the last of hov-tba
other had been given me by some acouaint-
ance to try. By the time we liebt Cd ~ -
second time had my little scheme uorLina
an right and was patting myself on the
trail were oh my
Train run off the track?'"
NO; not that. The man had smokod
aDout one-thrd of that cigar when there
was a stylish! bang! and she exploded
on MN. 1t was a torpedo cigar which sonoa
miserable cuss had put off on me for ioha
ana 1t worked my ruin. My man had his
mustache and eyebrows singed the end If
ms nose blistered, and his eyes filled with
aShes. ana ne arose in his wrath and fell
upon me-" ~ eii
Couldn't you explain?'
Mhen ne had me by the hair and was
blasting my blooming eyesp. Moi, ynnoh,
Explanations were not in order. He nunohad
thunder out OF me in about a minute and
OF course, we lost the contract and loSt
good Sit, and that's why 1 buy my own
cigars and don't want to mix in any extras"
Modest Request.
From the Chicago Tribune
4 don't ask you to remove your hat
MISS, plaintivey spoke the little man in
the seat behind her, but If you will kind
~ refrain from Wabbling your head 1 will
take II as favor 1 am used to the high
nat, but am not accustomed to the wab-
Gle, ana 1t confuses me and obstructs nv
view of the gentleman in the orchestra
who performs on the kettle drum
Sir"
Thank you. miss. don't mind the high
nat, but confess the wabble did bother me
a little. Ever SO much obliged. l can see
him quite distinctly now"
Il beg you won't apologize, miss. 1t was
entirely lnadvertent on your part 1 am
sure, and"
IF you say another word I'll call the
usher!"
BLESS you, miss, that will not be neces-
Any Of them would be glad to oblige me by
asking the gentleman who operates the ket-
tie drum to move little to the right so
as to give me better view Of him. but
can see him with perfect ease now thanks
to your having quit"
"USher!'
III call him for you, miss. Here, Jerryv'
am entirely capable Of calling him.
Sir! I'm going to ask him to bring the
manager of the hall!"
Il assure you. miss, that will not be nee
essary, either. The manager IS my son-in-
law. He will merely instruct the usher
to-ah, thanks!'
For the young woman, trembling with
Indignation, had removed her hat.
I.,,