New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1896-03-22
ABOUT USING THE MAILS
AN OFFICIAL. DOCUMENT WHICH DEALS
IN SARCASM AND IRONY.

AN OFFICIAL DOCUMENT "rlNii DAS
IN SARCASM AND IRONY.
,,,poss,puJrrrs WHICH THE PosToFFIcE WILL
NOT UNDERTAKE TO ACCOMPLISHMENTS
OTIS COMPLAINTS RECEIVED WITH
OUT OBJECTION OR SURPRISE.
SAYS THE CIRCULAR.
"Care,ossnoss in directing mail matter is the Ma
tional vice" once said Assistant Postmaster james
cavlor He has been in the postal service for
MANY years and IL may be that his view is al
fected In the same way was that OF the tanner
who first declared There's nothing ike Iea'he''
But most of those who have been for any ''e
employed in the Posoflice agree that there Is an
enormous total OF mistakes in addresses each
year They insist that Americans are more SIP
sbod and forgetful in this matter than people III
other countries because mail from aDroau u
always more egiby and carefully diTec'eu IMAM
Is domestic.
At any rate 1t is the theory in the pos'ai service
that every complaint against the Posoihce IS NOT
rocessarilv is,idad and that often the failure OF
letter to reach IT. destination is due to the faut
of the sender. In furthcrance or TINS idea' CIR
cular has been issued 1t Is regular ohlc'' uocu.
ment and is marked ~. " Gre -. ia. S--oOo'
but II Is far from being an ordinary dui routine
affair 1t is full Of sarcasm and states with clever
thousand and one complaints made against the
postofioe The heading is SUCCESSFULLY bland: "A
Few Hints to Those Who Make Use OF the Post
office" lust as II everybody did not make use OF
the Postofiicc.
THE FIRST HINT
direct Your Letters Legibly Is the hrst SUD-
heading and then the circular goes on incisvely:
Remember that the addresses on your mali mat
ter are not intended to be read by yourself. by
l., .hore uho familiar with
vour handwriting and who know that what looks
like winchester as written by You. Is really
NIanchester'-or that You make + IN IN" way
that most people make 7. etc, etc. ont by post
office clerks who apt TO read addresses as they
see them. who are always in a hurry. and cannot
afford TO delay the mall matter OF others by pro-
longed examination and scrutiny OF yours but
are conpeled 10 dispose Of IT quickly and to send
II to the place or person 1t to be intended to
reach"
This seems reasonable even self-evdent. II
would apparently be afront TO tell man this
a reflection on his intelligence. Yet 1t Is declared
that ~ the advice were followed there would be an
enormous diminutions In the maledictions now
heapel on the heads OF lc.ter-carrers, clerks and
postal officials generally. With much gravity the au-
thor Of the circular further suggests that yourown
street or box number docs not form part OF the ad
dress of mail matter intended for you. there Is
chance OF delay or mlsdevery. But many people
who visit the Postofce declare IN reply to this
that they are very well known" or have been
in business here for many years" or receive a
large mail daily" The circulars sub-rejoinder Is
tina, letters are assorted according TO their ad-
dresses not according TO the names o. the ad-
dressecs.
THINGS THE POSTMASTER DOESN'T KNOW
With a touch OF Indignation. the official author
insists that "Ncw-York ceased long since to be
village where the postmaster may reasonably be
ly,a., hnl,. NJ
sonablc to expect that all Of the many employees
OF thl. office shall possess such remarkable powers
OF memory as Will enable them 10 recall the resi-
dence or place OF business OF every person or firm
receiving mail matter addressed 'Ncw-fork city
which moreover Is one Of the most iroqucn. forms
OF direction on letters intended for transient resi-
dents who call at the General Delivery.
or course every effort is made 10 supply deficient
addresses but this always involves delay, even II
successful for properly inscribed letters and par
cells assorted first
Another sub-headinc is Don't Jump al conclu-
sions" This saliatory advice IL amplihed. IL ~
wrong you are told. to suppose tina, because
letter is returned TO you undcllvered after many
days tia; 1T never LETT the Ncw-York Posioiii'e,
because letters for other points arc never held
here. Even If it has not the postmark OF Ii' de-
tination that Is doubtless due 20 the carecssness
OF the postmaster there.
Surely T. body will dispute the proposition OF the
circuar-writlng laureate Of tho Postoce tina; let
ers cannot be delivered before tho trains vessels
bearing them have arrived nor beforc. tho malls Of
which nan ney m Ior spec that these mpossbits
VIII be accomplished. otherws" why make TINS
official disclaimer? Those who use the mails arc
further Informed that the records show mat me
arrival OF mails on schedule time II INC exception
and no, the rule" the fault lying with storms.
washouts railroad accidents. foes and street OBJ
structions.
SERVANTS SOMETIMES CARELESS.
good many people will. from personal
perience assent TO this part OF the circular Let
ers that are promptly delivered at their addresses
are not infrequcntly retained by servants. hall
boys. janitors and elevator attendants until they
find leisure or have the inclination to hand them to
the persons for whom they are intended, ana be
fore assuming negligence on the part OF the carrier
or OF the Postoice inquiry. Ike charity. should be-
The PostotIlce engages to look into every com
plant which goes into detail and to reply 10 II. but
charge AZ once that missing letter was stolen in the
PosiofIce Tor it may netcr have been mailed
may have been delivered and overlooked, or may
have been mlslaid or Incorporated by II servant
But infalllbnty ls MT claimed for the postal SER
vice and If the early part OF the circular gives a
contrary impression the reader should dismiss the
notion. For does not the document say mo de-
renee of errors in so large an establishment. the
operations of which must necessarily be conducted
in haste and by merely human means. Many mill
ions Of letters, circulars and packages are promptly,
correctly and safely delivered and dispatched here
every month and II a few were not occasionally
mistreated II would far to prove that the age Of
miracles Is not yet passed mat you snoull De the
Is unfortunate and doubtless annoying. but hardly
affords ground for sweeping assertion of general
inefilcency."
CERTAIN LIMITATIONS
1t seems that some people who have been getting
their morning mail at a certain hour expect to get
1t at the time II they happen to move and this
leads the sarcastic author OF the circular to protest
that the PostoiIce cannot arrange for Simultaneous
deliveries at every point. AS each carriers route
b.ca hog NO "A
necessarily be served sooner than others. Yet this
provision OF nature about an objects being In two
places at the same time Is looked az great
ha rdshlp by some who patrOnize the PostOflce.
There are other things which the Postoiice cannot
do-a few things. according to the frank admission
II cannot undertake to determine the ownership OF
mall matter directed. without street number