Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1896-11-20
IN THE HEATER PIPE.
THE RETIRED BURGLAR RELATES HIS
MOST SINGULAR EXPERIENCE.

1
Presents at His Mercy When He Made
an Unfortunats Step-In the End tie
Made q Contribution to the Collection.
"In house that was locking over
In town up the state one night, said
! the retired burglar. II came across
something that i never struck but that
once in all my experience, strange as it
may seem, and that was a lot If we'd
ding presents, all just as they were ar
ranged for display. When turned my
| lamp into the room, / wished l had
brought a horse and wagon; there was
a good deal of it that wouldn't have
been Of any earthly use 10 me, but it
seemed pity to leave any of it behind.
But if couldn carry it all off, could
have the fun OF picking, and l started
! TO look the things over. They were ar
ranged on tables and chairs and on the
floor around OH three sides Of the room !;
on the side opposite to the side that
had come In at, and on the sides to the
right and left; running around those
three sides in a sort Of irregular order.
On the side where l was there were
few chairs. thought I'd start in on
the left and work around to the right,
and / started from the door and had
! gone about three steps when l went
down through the floor, as it seemed to
/ me, but what / had really done was TO
step down through an open register.
suppose somebody must have dropped
something down through it and have
taken it out to get it and forgot to put
| it back.
There was wire screen under the
register over the pipe opening to keep
things from dropping down the pipe,
but it was very fine light wire. and it
didn't stop me at all; just slid down
into the pipe, pushing that along under
my feet. When dropped into the pipe,
! l had been facing TO the left in some
way as went down got skewed around
so that when I got down as far as I did
60 / was facing to the front; that is,
toward the center of the room. The
pipe didn't go straight down, but with
q curve. had thrown up my hands az
went down, and / suppose | might
have gone plumb to the furnace if
| hadn't clutched at the edge of the regis.
| ter opening and hung on. A minute be-
fore / was going to take my pick Of
roomful; now where was /?
Il had started across the room carry
ing my toolbag in one hand and my
lamp in tie other. The shock when l
went down had shaken the bag out Of
my hand, but had held on to my lamp,
though it was lying on its side now
with my fingers clutching through the
handle. The falling of the toolbag and
the striking of the lamp on the floor
and the scraping Of the wire gauze
| down through the tin pipe must have
made all together good deal of noise,
and / expected every minute TO hear
somebody moving about up stairs and
| coming down 10 haul me out, but no.
| body did come, and / set my lamp up
straight, and after I'd waited minute
| or two more l started 10 see if l could
haul myself out.
LAS | lay in the pipe my head was
| below the level of the floor; by great
| effort l could raise myself SO that the
upper half of hy head was above the
opening, but no higher; there was &c
room for play; when | got that high /
| found myself with my elbows close to
| my body and fairly wedged into the
| pipe; / couldn't get any higher.
Il let myself down again, and after
awhile pulled myself up again, and
held on by one hand and held up the
lamp and swung it round on the things
Then | let myself down again, and Won
4 L. I, -
only uncomfortable there in the posi-
ton / was III, il was mighty hot and
UNPLEASANT every way If | let go.
didn't know but that I'd slide down
against the furnace and, Of course, l
couldn't st@Ed it fol an indefinite length
Of time, and when I'd been in the pipe
| should imagine about two hours, |
made up my mind that | wouldn t try
to stand it any longer; I'd got to come
out some time, and might just as we'll
come out then; in fact, better, for while
the chances of my getting away at all
were mighty small, they would be bet.
ter at night than they would be in the
daytime.
SO l made up my mind TO kick on
the pipe and wake up the house and
have the thing settled. So l kicked
once, twice, and then / kicked again,
and by snakes kicked the pipe open
at my feet. There was joint there, and
I'd kicked it apart, and the sections
was in sagged down with my weight.
and l slid ont on the cellar floor. The
sagging down of that part of the pipe
detached it from the part above and it
fell on the cellar floor alongside Of me.
That made noise enough to wake every
body up; there couldn't be any doubt
about that.
Il went ont by the same cellar win
dow that 1 came in by. 1t was the first
and only such lot Of stuff that l ever
strnck, and | never got thing out Of
it; in fact, / added something to it my
self-a set of tools and dark lantern.
New York Sun.
''The Pyramid Limp"
The pyramid limp, as it has come
4 4 Il. - l.. 4.