The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1896-12-09
A BAcHELoR's VIEWS.
New Realm for Mankind in the South
Pacific Ocean.

Astoria, December 7.--(Editor Astor-
handsome few weeks ago bachelor
dom OF the entire Pacific coast was
thrown into an ecstasy Of delight by
the wonderful tales unfolded by Cap
tain Bergman and crew OF the Ameri-
can bark Big Bonanza, recently arrived
In San Francisco from Oriental shores.
where she had delivered a cargo OF
Oregon lr lumber that had been load
cd aboard Of her last June at the port
of Skamokawa. as TO a marvellous, man
less Eden. or Garden Of Paradise, where
lovely types OF female angels dwell.
In Astoria the narrative was read
with interest and due consideration. as
II partly solved a long-felt want. and
question that had caused many
young bachelor a restless night. and
which had also been a disturbing eie-
meHt In their peaceful dreams.
Instantly a few OF the older and wiser
heads got together and held a mutual
consultation, considering the fact that
over two thousand husbandless maid
ems. lovely and forlorn. and in despair.
simply because they had no liege lords
at their iiresides or mates OF their bo-
som TO counsel them in their daily
cares-to console them In their grief
and sorrow, or share their joys and
possessions,
The same men, acting upon that old
adage that It is not wise for man TO
live alone, concluded TO form a com
pany and invite all OF the eligible
young men under forty-five (members
OF the bachelors clubs included TO join
In the undertaking and covet what
they termed a valuable prize. But af-
ter a second thought they decided to
delay the matter for while. owing
to the political agitation going on at
the time. They feared that bachelor
lawyers, book agents, real estate sharks
or political cranks Cwhom they wished
to exclude from membership might
gain admission into the enterprise and
turn the same into either a political
machine or wildcat booming specu-
latlon,
Nor did they care to allow into the
scheme any Of the busted. politicians
that are continually harping about the
scarcity OF money-the grinding power
'f the bankers and corporations-the
Tree silver bubble the assessment Of
money in banks, or OF notes. stocks.
bonds or other collateral security in
hand; and last but not least those that
ire continually kicking because on the
rolls they do not appear
inder the category of horses, asses and
mules.
Still. no doubt animals of good draft
'ower would be very beneficial in the
utilization of the soil in that tropical
Innate.
The promoters contemplate forming
he company at as early date as pos
ible' In order to be the first upon the
'round, as at the present time the mat
er Is receiving considerable attention :
a san Francisco, and also at different ,
oints on the Sound. 1t is the intention
place the shares at the par value
one hundred dollars each. in order +.
hat the energetic young bachelors can
asily join the enterprise, However,
ne individual has expressed a willing
ess to subscribe one thousand dollars
>ward promoting 1t to a successful
They also realize that AS
'ria, In order to gain commercial su-
remacy of the Northwest coast, must
ranch out in trade relations with other ],
INES and shores, and as the isles =
here the dusky maidens dwell can be "
ade rich in the cultivation of tropical '
'oducts, and by colonizing them with
igible young bachelors In quest of
ives and good homes, a thriving and
'ofitable trade can be built up, which "
a very few years will be very bene- y
,ial to Astoria. ST
The main essential point that must
st be considered is the enlistment 81
the bachelor fraternity into the a
heme, as upon the willingness on -
cir part TO enter upon life of mar =
II bliss depends the success of the ~
oject Some of the eligible young ~
en- that have been approached on the " "
bject think it is. very favorable p p
Continued on Third Page) Sc