Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-05-14
"wHAT FOOLS THESE MoRTALs BE-"

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D.. "wHAT FOOLS THESE MoRTALs BE-"
strength, rower, patnos and tenderness
ir every thought that was given by
him to the people who loved him in life
and who venerate him because of his
works.
But John G. SAKE never dreamed that
American aristocracy and aristocratS
could leap all bounds and barriers of
common sense as they are hopping over
them now. He could not foresee the
Daughters of the American Revolution.
He could not anticipate the Colonial
Danes. He could not telepathical!y
and clarivoyantly prognosticate the De-
scendants of the Mayfower. Oh! IL
SAKE could only have known that these
great American faddists would ever
spring into existence, what a eridiron-
ing he would have given them. How he
would have basted them. How he would
have roasted them. But, Fortunately
for the jumpingja of modern society,
SAKE has dropped his pen forever, aud
men of less pretentious literary acquire
ments must pay some attention to them
in tender, LOVING and Christian spirit.
That is one of my missions, and the
American aristocracy of the national
capital shall have the benefit of some
time and tuneful mention in these col
umns. The plai. people of this couil-
try can stand it to read of thousands of
dollars expended for flowers and wines
at dinner parties in the larger cities.
They can hlindly believe that such pro
ceedings are necessary in city society.
They can hope that society will improve
as the Gospel takes possession of the
hearts and souls of society women, but
they will not be able to understand why
it is necessary for these people TO
try, nor their kinship with meE and
women who did something for the
world.
OF course, everybody is glad that John
Randolph. of Roanoke, was such an
orator and statesman; but nobody can
understand why the entire Randolph
family of to-day should strut and plume
itself on the work of the said John Ran
dolph, of Roanoke. -. -.- a.1..
Ihad ancestor on the staff Ct George
Washington; but that does not make
my newspaper writing valuable. The
Cid man was good soldier. He fought
for his country. He served the repub-
lie. He drew up his feet and was gath
cred unto his fathers. He did his duty
while on earth, and that is all there is
Of it. l do not see why l should join
an aristocratic society of Sons of the
American Revolution on account of
what that good man did. There is no
bread and butter in it for me; and the
ancestry business will not pass current
at the butchers, the BAKERS or any
other business place where supplies are
to be had for the table. . ..a .....
While Alfred Tennyson was in the
<igor of manhood, he wrote manly
things, but when he approached his
dotage he became effeminate and lapstd
into lordship. twas he who wrote:
From yon blue heavens above us bent
The gardener, Adam, and his wife,
Smile at the'claims of long descent"
Adam and Eve were not sent forth
from the womb of the universe to found
q race of aristocrats. They who look
back to an ancestry of 100, 200 or 300
years, might as wei trace their lineage
back to the families of the old world,
end then keep on tracing it back to the
gardener, Adam, whence all of us came
When these proud Sons OF the American
Revolution get back to Adam, they will
find that they are descended from n
coward, who tried to hide his faults by
D. 10 No
Adam should be pictured as smiling at
the claims of long descent. He must
see from his present abode that better
men than he have come uponthe scene
of action and passed away, for the
world is growing better all the time.
We have in Washington society of
Colonial Danes. These ladies know
nothing of the kitchen piano, common
ly called a washboard. They never
churned butter or MIXED cows. Prob
ably the original colonial DANES, who
suffered during the revolution while
their husbands and sens were with
Washington, MIXED the cows and
churncd butter and spun fax and wove
cloth. But these gentle ladies would
be shocked if such facts were now pre-
scented to them.
We have society of Daughters of the
Revolution, and they are forming an
exclusive aristocratic set in this capital
city Of the republic; right here at the
seat of the government of the people.
for the people and by the people. Are
they better, more refinsd. more virtu-