Kansas City daily journal., 1896-10-19
KANSAS TOPICS.

KANSAS TOPICS.
I'VE have" says the editor of the lola
Register. as a blast from the boreal pole
comes whistlng around the corner "a
good fan which we would like to trade for
a pair Of skates"
"The man who shuts one eye when he
squirts tobacco juice" says the Florence.
Bulletin. lis liar. We wouldn't believe
him under OATH
Speaking of those affinities which are
supposed to be floating around in the
terebinthine ether in search of each other
why can't a union be effected between Mr..
Million, of Crawford county, and Mr.. Dol
lar. of Phillips county?
abilene has had Egypt pounded into her
so much since Ed Little came back says
the Reflector. that when DIR. Hauser came
along with his lecture on India We turned
out TO 1t like man who has had too much
pork in hog-killin' time"
Mr.. Upcaper, of Coffey county, and Mr..
Buggedigger, of Labette county, are two
Kansas knights who break a lance with
lckelheimer wherever the Pop committee
will rent a hall.
Knock a Kansas Pop down with a sledge
hammer and he will come up smiling for
another round. One of their orators is
now going around over Western Kansas
declaring that Mark Hanna furnished the
money which advanced the price Of wheat,
and right after election it will slump
again.
There are dozen men In Newton"
says the kansan. whom the officials
would have mighty difficult time in
classifying should they desire to determine
whether they were white or colored. One
of these men claims to be son Of Cen
eral Sherman"
Yesterday Cy Leland set down another
name in the record he keeps of people who
must be attended to after election. The
possessor thereof is T. E. Leftwich. editor
Of the Larned Eagle-Optic, who stated in
a recent editorial that the only service Cy
rendered his country during the war was
In the capacity of sutler.
II suppose you think IL I were to take OF
another coat there would be nothing left
of me- said Senator ingalls, as he removed
his overcoat and stepped to the front Of
the stage in one of his Southern Kansas
meetings; and then he evoked another
laugh by declaring: IT inherit my stalwart
frame and magnificent physique from my
grandfather who was \ blacksmith
In 1898 Fred A. Stocks, who is now tho
Republican nominee for state senator in
the Marshall county district. enjoyed the
distinction Of being the youngest member
of the Kansas house. He made q record,
however, which landed him as chief clerk
of the treasury department in Washington.
which position he held during Harrison's
administration.
One day last week a farmer-looking man
with trousers which bagged at the knees
and blue umbrella in his hand walked
down the main street Of Lincoln. blinking
In surprise at the crowds he found on ev-
cry side. What's the matter; circus in
town. he inquired of q bystander. mo:
speaking by the Pop candidate for con-
gress," was the reply. well. well. well"
commented the old man as the two little
streams Of amber fluid at the corners Of
his mouth augmented themselves under
the excitement of the occasion, II had
plum forgot there was an election this
fall" And then he proceeded on over to
the postoffice to see if the quarterly post
age stamp voucher had arrived for the
Hon. William Baker, member Of congress
from the Sixth district.
W. C. Simpson, county attorney Of Lyon
county and chairman Of the late Baptist
convention in Topeka, Is out with q card
in which he Indignantly denies the report
that the convention adopted a resolution
condemning Governor Morrill,. such .
resolution was introduced" says Mr.. Simp-
son, "but 1t received only seven votes ouo
OF total Of more than hundred. The
sentiment Of the convention was PRACTICAL
ly unanimous for Governor Morrill,"
The, dispatches of yesterday announcing
the safe return Of Professor Dyche relate
that while in Alaska he formed the ac-
quaintance of Princess Tom. the most
famous and wealthy of all the Yakutat In
clans. While 1t Is not remarkable that a
handsome young Kansan should find favor
with wealth and aristocracy anywhere,
there is something about this account
which lacks the clearness and fuflness OF
lates, for instance. that Princess Tom has
$4,000 in gold twenties on her right arm
and on her left arm she wears ten bracelets
made Of SO gold pieces" II Professor
Dyche vouched for that statement We are
ready to swear by 1t. but we regret that
he did not add the further detail that
Princess Tom is a giantess with strength
like bull and biceos like the side rods
of a locomotive. II our arithmetic serves
US right. $4,000 in gold weighs about
jewelry which the princess appears to have
hung about her person. and we submit in
candor that seventy-pound bracelet
would be found somewhat burdensome for
anybody with less stature than q giantess
or less Imagination than the man who
wrote that dispatch.
State Superintendent of Insurance Riddle.
who belongs to more fraternal insurance
orders than any other kansan save George
w. Reed, is out with newspaper inter-
view. in which he says the fraternal COM
pany managers are becoming seriously
alarmed at the increasing number OF sui
cides among beneficiaries Of the various Or
derS. He says:
''It Is a noticeable fact that there are q
growing number OF suicides in the frater-
nal orders that are paying death benefits
without regard to the manner Of death.
The A. o. U. W. has heretofore taken no
stand against the payment Of suicidal
claims. probably altogether for the reason
that laws are silent on the subject, and
that such a defense would not be accepted
by the court, so long as no exception has
been made in the beneficiary certificate.
The seriousness Of the matter Is very ap-
parent and the presumption is that apart
from the suicidal act each one of the sui
cides might be living to-day. There has
been fostered humane sentiment that
suicide is a form of insanity; and therefore
We ought not to raise the question OF pay
ment. There is, however, a great respon-
sibility resting upon our order, II by our
laws, and the promptness with which We
pay death claims and without question.
we give encouragement to the suicidal
maria Members who join our order ara
morally obligated not to commit any crime.
-an To ar "