davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
DON'T STOP TOBACCO.
HOW TO CURE YOURsELF WILLY
USING 1T.

The tobacco habit grows ON "a man
until his nervous system rs seriously
affected, impairing Health, eo0fort and
happiness. To quit suddenly is too
severe IA shock 20 the system, rs tobacco
To an inveterate user becomes n stimu-
liant that his system Graves. ''Baco-
euro" is n scientific cure for the tobacco
habit, In nll its forms, carefully COM
pounded after tho formula of an emf.
neut Berlin physician who has used it
IN his private practice since 1872, with
out n failure. IL is purely vegetable
and guaranteed perfectly harmless.
You can use all the tobacco you want
while taking "Baco-Curo. IL will
hotify you when 60 stop. We give
written guarantee 10 cure permanently
any case with three boxes, or refund
the money with 10 per cent. interest.
"Baco.Curo' Is not substitute, but n
scientific cure, that cures without the
aid OF will power and with no incon-
venience, IL leaves the system as pure
and free from nicotine as the day you
took your first chew or smoke.
Cured BY Baoo-curo and Gained
Thirty Pounds.
From hundreds of testimonials, tho
originals OF which are on file and open
10 inspection, the following is present
ed
Clayton, Nevada, Co Ark Jan es. f8os,
Eureka Chemical a Mfg 20 Ia Crosse, Wis
ln all It's forms. Fer twenty-five years Of that
and heart disease, For fifteen years tried to,
quit, but couldn't. I took various remedies
among Others MOTTO Bac, /" 'Srhe Indian TO-
boccO Antidoto." Double Chloride OF Gold. &c
etc., etc, but none Of tlfem did ms the least bit
of good. Finally however, purchased n box OF
your "Baco-C -Curn' and II has entirely cured mo
OF The habit in Rll IFS forms. and have increased
thirty pounds IN weight and an relieved from
all the numerous aches and pains of body and
mind, ! could write qure of paper upon my
changed feeiInRs and condition,
Yours respectfully, II. II. MAnnuRY.
Pastor q. r. Church. Clayton, Ark.
Sold by nll druggists at sI 90 per
box three boxes, (thirty days treat
menD, s25 with iron-clad, written
guarantee, or sent direct upon receipt
OF price. Write for booklet and proofs.
Eureka Chemical e. Mfg. Co, La Crosse,
Wis, and Boston, Mass.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
MUSIC IN THE SCHOOLS.

Ex-G Governor A. Brooks Fleming
is good story teller, and enjoys y
joke even on himself
When the duty of selecting music
books for tie public schools OF the
State was imposed on Governor
Fleming. Treasurer Rowan and
State Superintendent of Schools,
Virgil A. Lewis, the most discrimi-
mating and cultured mocking bird
vocalists Of the "Wer Born" com
monwealth were "enlisted' 40 the
following "true story" illustrates !:
Mr.. Rowan showed the "samples"
over TO Mr. Lewis with the remark,
81 don't know one note from
another and always despised
'quire' singer"
Mr. Lewis said, "Samo 10 you
Landy. Let the Governor" and
the Governor declined because
when he was younger than now, he
paid two dollars to singing school
teacher for lessons for himself and
q" best girl" The embryo Governor
would shout in chorus bnt could
not sound note alone. The
tuning fork" twanged near the
Governors tympanum constantly.
Finally the Professor SAID :
Brooks, take back your dollar
You can't sing You will never
lenrn to sing, and you disturb those
who can Turn your sweetheart
over to your best friend, aad leave
the school"
The committee saw the force OF
the Governors anecdote, relieved
him Of specill responsibility, and
made the selection on the meri Of
the binding. cover, paper and typog.
raphy.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
Sloo Reward. 500.

The readers of this paper will be
pleased to learn that there is at least
one dreaded disease that science has
been able to cure in all its stages and
that rs Catarrh. Halls Catarrh Cure is
the only positive cure now known To
the medical fraternity. Catarrh being
constitutional disease, requires a con-
stitutional treatment. Halls Catarrh
Cure is taken internally, acting directly
upon the blood and mucous surfaces o.
the system, thereby destroying the
foundation of the disease, and giving
the patient strength by building up the
constitution and assisting nature in
doing its work. The proprietors have
SO much faith in it's curative powers,
that they offer One Hundred Dollars
for any case that it fails to cure. Send
for list of Testimonials. Address,
f. j. CHENEY a. CO., Toledo, O.
ssS Sold by Druggists Use.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
How TO Enioy GOOD Health.

II you are suffering with any skin or
blood disease, Rheumatism, Catarrh,
Ulcers, Old Sores, General Debility.
etc, send stamp to the Blood Balm Co
Atlanta, Ga, for book of wonderful
cures, free. This book will point the
way to speedy recovery. Botanic
Blood Balm, Oh. B. b. is manufactured
after a long tested prescription of an
eminent physicians; and is the best
building-up and blood purifying medi-
cine in the world. Beware of substi-
tutes. Price sl.O0 for large bottle
See advertisement elsewhere.
For sale by Druggists.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
TO RuS OK NOT TO RUN.


Hon. James A. Browns Soliloauy.
with an Apology 10 Col. Hamlet
10 run, or not to run; that Is the
question:
Whether tits nobler in the mind to
suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous
politics
Or to take arms against a sea Of
troubles,
And by Withdrawing end thems To
withdraw, Ito run
No more; and by Withdrawing to
say we end
The heart.ache and the thousand
natural shocks
That my candidacy is heir to,-'tis
n consnmmation
Devoutly to be wished. To stay
to stand pat
To run perchance get beat: aye,
there's the rub;
For in that sleep OF political death
What bills and heelers may como
When we have shuflled of this
candidates coil
Must give us pause. There's the
respect
That makes my candidacy OF 50
long life;
For who would bear the slips and
scorns Of time,
The Committees wrong; the Chair.
mans contumely,
The pangs of forsaken Democracy,
the Judgeship delay,
The insolenco of Hoke, and the
spurns
That patient merit Of the unworthy
takes,
When myself might my quiotus
make
With bare Withdrawal? Who
would bear
To bo imposed upon by candied
friends,
And others with an AK to grind
But that the dread of something
after withdrawal
That undiscovered country from
whose bourn
No withdrawer has ever returned
Except Peter Are Smith)
Puzzles the will and m axes me rather
Bear the ills / have and stay IN the
race
Than fly to others that / know not of
And tackle Wotring for the Attor-
ueyshIp.
Thus politics doth mako towards
of ns all;
And thus the native hue Of De-
mocracy
Is covered o'er with the desire for
office
And the teachings Of my early youth
With this regard for Office their
currents
Turn awry and lose the name of
action.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
BOGUS BOOMERS
Take In MOrgantOwn People With q
Tempting Scheme.

"
Tempting Scheme.
MoRGAMTowN, w. VA, April g..
A few weeks ago a party of four,
representing themselves to be Pitts
burgh capitalists, came to this place
and closed deal with the Building
and Investment Company for 2 900
lots in an addition to the town.
They promised to put manufacture
ing establishments bere to employ
1000 men, and canVassed the town
to sell the lots, requiring purchas.
ers to pay in 50 and deposit 5000, to
be paid when the lots were sold l..
A good sum of ready cash was Sc
cured in this way, and finding that
the people we're growing suspicious
Of them they skipped out, paying
their board bill only on threats OF
being arrested.
Many of the citizens looked upon
the project as one which would Gre
ate big boom and their hopes are
blasted and money gone.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09

The fight that occurred recen tly
between two rival preachers at
Buzzard's Bay and the split in the
Salvation Army show that all who
profess to follow the Prince of
Peace are not fully possessed of his
spirit. BelIigerent Peter seems to
have more practical followers than
the gentle Nazarene.
What the average church mem
Der needs is to know less about the
doctrinal speculations about Jesus
and become more familiar with
his life.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
Over 800 Deeaa

Just printed at this office on Special
Bond Paper, Ruled and Cut to Order.
Latest Form and Greatly Improved
Mailed TO any address for l0cents each,
Tor quarter or 10 cents per dozen
Call at or address Tux ARGUS PRrNrfSa
HOUSE KiuZwood, w. Va.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
DR.. W. SIM0NT0N.
DENTIST.

VIII continue 20 make his regular visits 70
Eewburg, ,RowIesburg Tunnelton and Kingwood
Due notice OF his next visit 70 each place vii
appear inthis paper
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
Bottled Up!

Whether in the form of pill powde,
or liquid. the doctors prescription "a,
blood diseases is always the same
mercury or potash. These drugs bottle
mp and poison aud dry il up in the
system, but they also dry up the marrow
In the bones at the same time.
The suppleness and elasticity of the
joints give way to stiffness, the rack.
ing pains of rheumatism. The form
gradually bends, the bones ache, while
uecrsPit1de and helplessness prema.
II Is but short step TO a pair OF
crutches. Then comes falling of
the hair and decay Of the bones.-s CON.
dition truly horrible.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
EporAsRg
MERCURY

table. and one thousand dollars reward is
offered for proof to the contrary. IL
never fails to cure Contagious Blood
Poison, Scrofula, Eczema, Rheumatism.
Cancer, or any other disease of the
blood III you have blood disease,
take remedy which will not iniure Won
Beware of mercury; don't do violence
TO your system. Don't get bottled up 4
Our books s sent free to any address.
Swift Specific Co., Atlanta, Ca.
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09

Contagious Blood
Poison-the curse
OF rnankind-is the
most horrible of ali
diseases, and has al
ways bamed the
doctors. Their pot
ash a nd mercury
bottle upthe poison,
but 1t always breaks
forth again attack.
ing some delicate
organ, frequently
the mouth and
throat, filling them
with eating sores.
S.S.S., is the only
known cure for this
disease. 1t is guar
n nfaa1 s,,,~a1- -o
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09
AMONG OUR EXCHANGES.
short Selections Culied with Care
For Our Readers

Papa" inquired the editors
only son, what do you call your
office ?" "Well," was the reply.
"the world calls the editors Office
the saactum sanctorium. "Then
| suppose" and the small boy was
thoughtful for moment, "that
mammals office is spanktum
spanctorium, isu't it ?"
West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-04-09

The American offshot OF tho
Salvation Army of Gods American
Volunteers, as they call themselves,
have adopted the fatigue uniform
OF the United States Army. This
would be rather confusing out in
the Indian country, and would
keep the redskins guessing at times
between prayer meeting aud q
powder magazine. = Register.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1896-11-19
Free. Free! Free!

Knowing the very general
desire among our customers
for good family portraits we
take pleasure in announcing
offer will insure orders in
large numbers, your early
visit il desired. These
Photos are to be enlarged
and finished in Crayon and
with one of the largest and
best known Portrait Copy
ing Houses in this country,
to copy for us a large num-
India ink to life size, of the
same size and quality as
have been sold for years at
$40 each; and we propose to
make, a present of one of
these elegant Portraits to
each ofour CASH CUSTOMERS
as soon as their purchases
at our store amount to S25.
The price for our goods will
remain Just as low as hereto
fore but we trust that this
unexampled offer on our
part will greatly stimulate
cash trade and induce all to
to them as well as to the
public at large, that we
have made arrangements
.ber of Photos, which we are
to send them. All that is
necessary is to pay for the
frame which we will furnish
at the lowest wholesale price
Sample of portraits and
frames are on exhibition at
our store, and as our liberal
buy for CASH as we'll as to
prove to the public gener-
ally that it is not only cur
aim to sell goods CLOSELY
FOR CASH, but to please our
customers in other ways,
and to occasionally with
them with extra liberality in
repayment for their custom,
which they have SO gener-
ously showered upon us in
the past, and which we have
no doubt they will continue
to give us in the future.
Respectfully,
Blossom G5 Blossom,
Corner Front & Reese SITS.
Battle Noun tain, New,
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1896-11-19

ST. Paul, MINI. Sept 04
Eureka Chemical 4 Mfg Co., La Crosse Wis
SRsI have
have smoked regularly My
whole told
tobacco being
ley Cure Bc ard other remedies but without
until accidentally learned BACO CURO Three weeks
commenced consider myself
cured perfect a and the horrible for which
smoker fully appreciates completely
"BACO-CURO' simply wonderful fully recommend it,
Yours truly c. w. HoRSIcK
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1896-11-19

We have taken the agency for the
Worlds Celebrated Poultry Cure.
Knowing that most of poultry in this
country require health restorer. We
have succeeded in getting the agency
of the above medicine, to be mixed
with feed, which diyesis poultry of
disease and vermin and causes them to
furnish fresh eggs constantly. Try it,
and have fresh eggs and some of that
delicious Rex ham that we have the
exclusive agency for. !.
Blossom & Blossom
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1896-11-19
RATES Of ADVERTISING.

Having superior advantage of be-
ing an actual resident of Nevada for
thirty-three years, | am prepared to
handle all classes of Real and Per
sonal property, gold, silver, copper,
.ead, and iron mines, farming and
grazing lands, water rights and deal
er in cattle, horses. mules, sheep
and hogs.
Parties wishing to buy or sell any
kind of property, will do well to
make their wants known 10 the un-
dersigned. ]. A. Blossom,
Battle Mountain. New.
The Central Nevadan. [volume] (Battle Mountain, Nev.) 1885-1907, 1896-11-19
Jusiicious Advertising.

Judlcious Advertising.
CREATES many n new business:
ENHANCES many nn old business
PRESERVES manly a lnrke business;
REVIVE ES many 1t duh business:
Reset rs many n lost business.
SAVES many falling business:
SECG RES success in any business.
To advertise judieiously," use
the columns Of the NEvADAN. 1t
circulates extensively throughout
Lander and adjoining counties, be-
sides all over the Coast.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18
GIo..nry of nn.chnm Tcrm..

WallorlnE n sing~lc-NrakinE a base hit.
\ fungo to ccntcr-A fly to centcf held.
y wnistling tfiplet-A three base HIT,
Ifugging a musty-Cntching a swift hall.
Connecting with a balloon tly-Catching
n high bail. synonyms: "Clhsping a hlEh
one and pulling n trcw down.
Dying easy at irst-IDoscrihes n case
whore the first baseman puts a man out
with little effort.
iIad wings on his hccls-uscd to describe
n fleet runner.
describe "A vigorous batter.
Larrupad a scrnper-Hatted n high bail'
Smashing a peach is almost anonymous
but less definite.
Lacing an easy one-Dcscrihes a. case
where the bntsmnn has little difficulty in
dealing with the pitcher.
Enchanting n cyclone with the willow-
To bat a bali which moves OF very swiftly
pursuing n course near the earth.
Ambled 10 the bag-Made a base by easy
stages.
EmbczalinE the plate-pescrihes, a case
whore strategy temporarily takes the place
If leg talent, ,
Toboggancd to thiri-This torn is applied
TO cases where a runner completes MS Jour-
ncy In a sitting posture.
Kangarooei to second - Reached second
base by leaps and bounds.-Chicago l'mes-
Herald.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

been shaking hands with the PARROTS TO
verify this observation. finds that the lett
handed habit may be induced in parrots
from tho fact that In offering ones finger
for the parrot to grasp II Is usually mat
OF the right hand The parrot. Therefore,
puts hts left claw forward, II tho left
finger be offered the parrot, the bird, VIII
put forward the right foot He saNs, now
over. that there is apparently n small pref
rrcncc for the left foot, hut this he nc-
counts FOR on the ground that left-foot'l-
ness 4. most always induced in parrots
from the fact that those who offer the
finger or food to the parrot usually do so
with the right hand. Repetition OF this
process, II would seem, tends to make the
Science News,
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

"Havc YOU chlldrpn?' asked the ~canvuss-
cr as he stopped in the doorway.
Il have 30 replied the man ut the desk,
without looking up.
"Thcu YOU viii Ind this book"
Don't want it," interrupted tho man ~
tho desk
''iut You don't unaorstanI,' persisted the
canNaSstr. 81 can assure you that You Will
nud IL a great holp in correcting children.
II is by one Who
Not hig enough" interposed the man at
the dosk after one quick glance AZ the book,
"Bcsides. | already have a shinglc that
seems 10 answer the prr~posc.'-ohicag
Post
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

Up from the cradle came a wall,
At hrst "a ucuslyc coo.
Into n weird vooifrr0us wall
OF mournfuluoss n grew
His sorrow IN "a vein uroliN,
He struggled TO reveal
''AIy fathers talking politics;
And mother ride- a wheel,
They said I'm cross. I'm simply sad
Al being slight0l so.
] wish the hahy-curriage fad
Could somehow yet % show.
How can You blame one IN my fix
For setting ur % sqUDal2
Ny fathers talk!uE politics,
And mother rides a Wheel
-Washlngton Star
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18
wnii From the New hoy.

Wnil From the New 10Y.
Wish't | wis a gurl,
Std NV bcin' q boy,
An bang my hair. an eat Ice cream,
An ride ahind my ~fcllcr's team,
Like gurls duz- .
Wish, l WIS a surl!
wish't 7 wits n CURL.
An when't ON sunday mite
ia whack that old rianner,
Just clean Ip outen site,
An Ia marry sum rich Teller
Like gtirls d1g-
Wish't l WIS a surll
Wlsh'i I WIS n Eurl.
ia Just chaw gum and talk,
An when ont ter promcrnod
I'd take up all the walk.
Like some girls due. .
Wish't l wus a CURL!
Wish't I wis n CURL,
All boys good fer ts't
Ter carry coal an run odd Jobs
An git of the walk for dudy snohs-
Like did tothor mite
Wish't l WIS n gurll
Wlsh't I wus n rurl.
Wish't the Lord made all boys rurls,
An made gtirls boys, tud bon the am
An Ia ben Lily Ann by name.
An shed ben John or Joe Sud of Jane. ILL.,,
Wish't ! WIS a eurl!
bradford pa Era.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

What ls that which no one wishes to have
and no one wishes TO lose? y bald head.
why is a Eatepost like a potato? Be-
cause they are both put into the ground &c
propagate.
Why are Goals In London like towns given
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

How foolish is the pessimist.
p,spoudcnt and f%orlnrn,
Who always. whom he gets n rose,
Goes hunting for the thorn.
The optlmlst has better sense;
The charm Of life he knows.
He doesn't mind n scratch or two,
II he can get tho rose.
So do not he n pessimist.
Cnnkercd with discomfort:
The optimist has heaps Of fun
That doesn't cost 4 cent.
-SomcrNillo Journal.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

on, for q dip In an arctic sea-
\ dive from the ultimate pole.
Where the rugged bear from his freezing
lair
Comes out for an icy stroll!
ON FOR a tlmo on an Iceberg high
As the bend OF the tarthest blue,
where no man would say as You frozo
as it coii enough for you?"
Atlanta Constitution.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18
"What Holds It UpY

We hear that a hundred times a day. People come along look
mr. at the great solid stone front to our store which is suspended
OF r,imbers, and they wonder how a few posts can hold up 50
much, and, being American, they ask questions. we had III
tended to keep this scheme a secret till after election, as there
were st many things to try and figure out, but since two biHs,
Bill Bryan and Bill Mckinley, have started out to explain all the
other things now, we'll expose our secret to the gaze oil the pub
lie A good many people suppose the contractors ar holding up
the building They're just holding up the owner. We're hold E
ing up the building. From the second floor 10 the fourth our
store is packed with clothing. Clothing is cheap If the build
ing should happen to fall. the clothing would have to come down
with it. Clothing can't come down any further. That's what
holds up the building. Maybe that isn't quite plain to you, but
it's dollars to doughnuts that it's fully as plain as this silver and
gold question. If you want to sec just exactly how far down
clothing has gone, come down here and go upstairs. You'll be
surprised. Maybe you've heard of our all wool cashmere suits
at $4,000. If you haven't Ger them you don't begin to realize
how good a thing they ire. We've got some better ones, too
$500, sG75, 50. rs and $3.50. Lots of folks don't trade here, but
they all would if they knew what we're doing these days
TleGru4&a G(otbiimq 60
EES2aHElS
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

thick that she If obliced to build n smudEe
In the stove and nh the room full OF smoke.
When 1t gets too thick they all adjourn to
the open air and start n new smudge. She
says she has been in the smoke so much
that she has taken on n finer color. like
.LnA of stuuLIl lam-
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

am the soorrhcr!
Please observe
TN. curve
That uppertains unto my spine!
With AoaI duckci low,
j go
o'or man and beast, and. woe
Unto the thing
That fails TO scamper when I ting-a-lins!
l.et people jaw
And go to law
To rry To check my gait,
II that's their Eamei
I hate
To Kin folks, but I'll do it, just tho same.
I guess,
Unless
They clear tho track for me;
Because, yuu see.
/ ann the s0Orrhor, fun OF zeal,
And just the thing l look ike on tho wheel
Cleveland Leader.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-07-18

up to rluglcr? Because they are sacked
and burned.
What is that which is often brought to
tho table, always cut and never eaten? y
pack OF cards.
What moral lesson does a weathercocl on
4 church stoepla continually incuieatr? It's
yaue to q spirr.
Why shouldn't a hoy throw dust in HE
teachers eyes? because 1t may occasion
harm TO the pupil.
What an. ;ha most unsociable things In
the wor}d2 Mile stones, for you never see
Two OF them together,
What is that which Adam never saw,
never possessed and yet gave two to each
OF his chillTan2 Parents,
WHY Is a restless man IN q bed like n law
yor2 Because he Hes ON one side, then
turns around and lies on the other side.
Why Is chicken pic like n ~plnsmith'a
'NNyh,,. XIX r, ,,1r. wnr.1 III LIN
because he rs guided by u minister.
What word may be pronounced quicker
by adding Is syllable to it III Quick,-Fac,
uul Fancy.