The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-12
ABUSE OF AN INNOCENT CLocKs
A Former Pullman Porter Banged IL
Into the Fire, But 1t Keeps Time.


From the Chicago Journal and Press.
VIII Moran has clock. 1t used to
run like a respectable time piece. but fell
into disgrace, and all the colored people
on the South side are helping Moran abuse
1t.
Mr.. Moran is colored, Notwithstanding
his Celtic cognomen. He Is an ex-Pullman
porter. He made beds and took tips be-
tween Chicago and Kansas City until his
fortune was accumulated. Then he re-
tired, and, had he not bought an alarm
clock, he might have passed the remainder
Of his days In peace.
Moran lives at 29i3 Fifth avenue. His
clock is the common, nickle-plated, wind
me-eyery- might alarm variety. One would
never suspect It Of misconduct. For a
time II behaved charmingly but soon IL
began to buck" Moran would set the
alarm for o'clock. 1t would wake him
up at midnight. He would set 1t for mid
It did, 1t would leap clear into bed and
dance festive jig upon the PROSTATE
form OF the unhappy sleeper.
But this was simply the beginning of the
chronometers meanness. 1t lost time
1t gained time, struck II at O'Clock. and
set It's alarm Off every ten minutes But
Moran figured out "a system of accurate
time telling by which he knew that when
his clock alarmed and the minute hand
pointed to and the hou rhand stood at a
quarter past 1t was exactly IS minutes to
system was strictly reliable and Moran
was happy. He thought he had vanquish-
ed his foe; but he was sadly mistaken
The clock changed its tactics. 1t would
run all night, and refused to go in the
day time. Then ii ceased it's nocturnal
ticking and worked only by day. Then il
stopped altogether preparatory to its final
catastrophe.
The other evening Moran went home to
dress. He had just twenty minutes in
which to meet his best girl. He glanced
at the clock. II was as dumb as a stone.
from his landiady, and set his time-pi bss
going exactly right 'Itll run till / get
out of here" he remarked. Then he pro-
ceeded to get himself up stunningly.
Suddenly there was a rumpus on the
center table, and, looking around, Moran
saw the clock waltzing, striking and
alarming at the same time.
well, If this isn't a sample of age-end
degeneration and downright cussednessP'
exclaimed the exasperated literateur of
the Pullman Porters Club" grasping
the still alarming clock, which, by this
time, had gained an hour and struck 2:15.
Moran threw the clock down and stamped
1t in the face kicked Il across the room
and back again, tossed it to the ceiling.
smashed out window with it. and then
hurled it against the door
mercy upon US, Mr.. Moran, are you
stark mad?' exclaimed the excited land
lady, appearing upon the scene.
mo, madam" explained the angry man
as politely as he could, I'm just a little
nervous-er, beg pardon Have disturb
ed your"
In his embarrassment Moran gazed out
of the broken window for relief, when, to
his utter disnay, he discovered his lady
love on her way to the theater, with his
most dangerous rival.
Heaven guard and protect mei' cried
Moran Il won't do a thing to that
blanky BANKED clock
Then he pitched it into the red hot stove
and dashed from the room to cool his
fevered brow in the glare of the winter
moonlight.
Moran declares that when he returned
half an hour later, the clock was stil go
ing He says he fished it out of the
stove, soused 1t into pail of water and
set ii on the table, and that since that
moment ii has kept excellent time. Mo-
ran tried to keep the story from the
boys" but it leaked out, and he had to
treat the entire eighty members of the
'Porters' Club"
That is why he and his friends are
abusing an innocent clock.