davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-18
should Have Hold His 1onsue.

In London Answers there y told .
story Of e watchman who threw him.
self ont Of work by his stupidity. he
had been engaged by the directors Of an
Australian bank, and brought with him
good Recommendations.
The chairman Of the board cent for
him and proceeded - pest him up"
a 70 his duties.
"well, JameA" - began, ''this =
Jour nrst job ee this kind, An< itf'
Eyes, sir"
"Yeur duty must b - exercise vici.
lance"
Eyes. sir."
"Bs careful how sersngers approach
you-"
81 win, SIR"
mo stranger must be allowed to en-
ter the bank at night under any pre-
text whatever"
"No, sir"
"And our manageable b Q good man.
honest and Trustworthy: but It win b
your duty to keep your eye on him"
"But 1t will be hard to watch two
men and the bank at the same time"
1.-TWO men, how?"
"Why. sir, 1t was only yestAr6ay that
the manager called me In for Q talk,
and he said you were one Of the best
men in the city. but 1t would be Just
as Well to keep both eyes on you, and
let the directors know u you hung
about after hours"
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-18
Cumulative Effect.

Sir Boyle Roche has, as rivals among
parliamentary orators, the gentlemen
who repeat a meaning in several diff
ferent words, In order to gain what
they are pleased to call a cumulative
effect.
One Of these was found, some years
agD, in q member OF Congress from
Colorado. In a speech IN the House IN
which he assailed hotly a gentleman on
the other side Of the House, who dis
dained to reply to him, he concluded a.
follows, pointing his finger at his vic
tim:
There he sits, Mt. Speaker-there he
sits, mute, silent and dumbv'
Yes. Nj. Speaker" interrupted
member On the other side, and he isn1
6ayinS . wordP
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-18
Hugs Land Tract in Litigation.

The ownership Of tract of land "a, 900 ,0ov
acres in extent. all the way from Springfield.
NO., to the Pacific 0oean, is in litigation,
the case being before the United States 81.
prone Court. Robert Mingus claims the
land, and 80 does the Atlantic and Psciho
Railroad Company. II the claims OF the
railroad company should be sustained, oil
of the patents issued By the United States
and entries allowed to settlers for parts OF
such lants since 1886 would be nullided.
The Supreme Court Of the Territory has de-
oidsd in favor OF Mingus.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-18
(To be coltinued.)
A Long Slide.

A system Of rapid transit transpor
tation Is In use in California. which
for cheapness Of operating expense is
probably the lowest In the country,
despite the fact that the cost Of con-
struction was very high, says the Gin
cinnati Enquirer. A lumber company
In Fresno county. California. has built
q lumber fume fifty-two miles long,
which In places has a grade Of % pei
cent. and which crosses a suspension
bridge 451 feet long. something on the
plan of the great suspension bridges
across the Niagara gorge. The fume
is V-shaped, and. strange to say. In ad.
dition to carrying lumber. Is utilized
for the transportation Of passengers
-one way-for. like the road to ruin
in old temperance books. the line only
runs one way, and that down. Tht
boat in which the passengers travel
or perhaps 1t would be better to say
shoot, Is a v-shaped box about sixteen
feet long. and which is roughly knocked
together with boards. since its good
for one trip only" The front end Of
the strange craft is left off. as the We
locity of the water Is so great. despite
the speed Of the boat. 1t does not rur
back into 1t. Preparatory to the triI
q plank Is placed along the bottom
on which the passenger rests his feel
while sitting single file on cross seats
When all Is ready the spikes by which
the boat Is held while loading are pull
ed out, and away 1t gees on its fifty
rwo-mile journey. in some cases at
tanning the terrific velocity Of seventy
miles Der hour.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-18
CHAPTER *.

Gnmsby street, whefs Mrs. Grace,
Edith's grandmother; had Lodgings, to
which Edith Grace had been driven that
moruine, . one Of the humble. dull, dinsy
kind.
Ma Grace lived at No. q, half way
down TIE street. She rented the 6rst noet
unfurukhed. She had lost some money
In tie Disaster which swallowed MP her
e-anddssShter's little al. The utmost
economy now became nscsssarv Tor the
od woman, and she had resolved to sivs
no ths tiny room until BOW E1thS
Thsf Thursday morning when Edfth
.iishtsd nem IL al Ma 0saes was
eitfiae in - fsNet Iea1 N1AbsN l9aaas
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-18
Economical.

Husband--You're not economical
Wife-Weu, II You don't call q wom-
An economical who saves her wedding
dress for a possible second marriage
I'd like to know what you think econ.
omy isl-Answers.
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-18
A Thrifty Landlord.

It II said that the secret Gf success
In bookkeeping lies in letting nothing
@ - WaSta. and IN taking advaRta8s
Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-11-18

Of small opportunities. This may b
a good rae, but it seems that It may
be carrie 4 too far. A commercial trav.
eler in She hardware line reports to
his trade Journal . case Of adaptation
which appears . tr1ae extreme.
He was In hotel In North Caru-
Lima town Of some size. and wanted q
bath. He rang q bell and asked II
the house had any bath-tubs.
"Yeal sab; nice ones. sah," answer.
ed the waiter He went away and
presently returned. bearing ON his
shoulders . coffin with silver-plated
handles and Lid all complete.
What do you mean by bringing that
in?" asked the traveller.
Oats de baff-tub. san," said The
waiter
''Ths bath-tubr
"Yes sab. You see. sab, De iaind.
io'd, he used to be In de undertaking
business, sab. an he had . lot . collins
on han, when he sor out an took dis
hotel. His son = in de tinsmi6 bust
ness, sah. 90 he don had de cof1ns lined
wild tin, sab. and dey make bery nice
baff-tubs. sah. Try it. sab; you'll hls
IT,"
The traveller conquered his repus-
nance, opened the cofdn-nd. and found
the strange bath-tub nicely lined with
tin. BE took q bath. but declared that
he did not feel Just right about It
The record-union., 1896-04-16
An expert is my authority for the

An expert is my authority for the
statement that the best brand of skunk
is the bluegrass skunk, though why is
not known, unless it is that whatever is
bluegrass is best, no matter what it is.
And, further, the best bluegrass skunks
come from Madison County. Nor does
anybody know why that is, best" in
this connection meaning they are more
nearly all black, and by that more valu-
able for their fur.
When the weather becomes very cold
the skunks go into their holes and stay
there without food or water, remaining
sometimes as long as two months. Only
very cold weather, however, drives
them to this. They do most of their
sleeping by day, and when one is fast
asleep he lies flat on his back. with his
feet up in the air, and While in this con-
dition may be picked up and carried
around by the tail without waking him.
When he is merely taking a siesta, he
curls up as kitten would.
AS l said above, the skunk is a cleanly
animal, and there is never any odor
about his living place or his person, and
he is especially careful to curl his big,
bushy tail over his back when he turns
loose his weapon of defense. The old
story that he uses his tail in scattering
his odor is a grannys yarn, in which
there is no charlottesville Courier
Journal
The record-union., 1896-04-16
A Cab-Horse'S Feat.

A cab-horse which runs down a flight
Of seventy-two steps, and reaches the
end of it's journey without either it or
the vehicle dragged behind it being any
the worse for the adventure, is certainly
a remarkable animal, which might le-
ultimately look forward to figuring in
some circus, rather than dragging fares
wearily through the Paris streets. The
animal which has just distinguished
itself in the way described was, we
read, waiting patiently in a certain
streets of the French Capital the other
morning while its driver was fast
asleep inside the vehicle. The whistling
of a passing train, it is surmised,
reused the horse from its contempla-
tions, and it determined to start off at
brisk. trot to ascertain what the
whistling meant. 1t happens that the
street in question is divided by two
flights of steps, and the horse, in its
reregrinations, reached the top of them.
At this apparent critical moment the
cabman inside the vehicle awoke. and
perceiving the danger ahead he jumped
out rather badly hurting himself by
the fall. The sequel of the incident
shows that he would have been better
inspired had he remained where he was.
The horse without even scratching it
self or in any way damaging the cab,
reached the bottom of the flight Of
steps, and when a couple of policemen
hustled up expecting to find a smashed
to-atoms cab and a dead horse, they
were amazed to discover the down.
stairs Journey had been neatly accom-
plished, and that the animal was not
even excited by his little adventure
London Standard.
The record-union., 1896-04-16

The California Press Association has
forwarded a letter to the State Board
Of Trade, suggesting that it devise a
method of inaugurating movement
looking to a general celebration Of the
semi-centennial of the discovery of
gold in California and of the signing of
the treaty Of Guadalupe Hidalgo, un-
der which California was acquired
Those two dates come close together
early in the year 1885, They were
events that determined the destiny of
California, Texas, Nevada, Arizona and
other Pacific territory. Texas has
nearly completed her preparations for
celebrating one Of these events, but
California is the only State that can ap-
propriately celebrate both at the same
time. The action Of the association is
to be commended, and it is to be hoped
that the State Board Of Trade will be
able to set on foot such activity as
will result in inducing the several COM
munities of California to observe in a
proper manner the semi-centennials re-
ferred to. There should also be one
general celebration, and where could
that be held with greater appropriate
ness than on the site Of Suffers Fort
in this city?
The record-union., 1896-04-16

Some Of the eminent journals Of the
large commercial cities of the East bit
terly deride the sentiment in favor OF
Cuban independence, or Of recognition
Of the belligerency Of the Cubans. They
persist in stigmatizing those who hold
opposing views as lingo enthusiasts .
These journals should remember that
some great movements that have gone
on to success have proceeded under
titles applied in derision, which they
have taken up and adopted. It may
prove true in this case. We have care
fully noted the expressions Of the press
and people through the papers, and find
there is a strong disposition to accept
the appellation the opponents Of Cuban
independence apply to those whose
sympathies go out to the struggling
revolutionists.
The record-union., 1896-04-16
BULLETS IN BATTLE.
An Old Soldier Throws Out a Few
Hints Concerning Shooting.

Hints Concerning Shooting.
The old soldier with a hot toddy be-
fore him was communicative, and the
Washington Star reporter was listening
with interest and asking questions to
keep the ball rolling.
How did you feel when you went into
your first fight?" he inquired, as most
people do when they begin to ask a
soldier questions about his experiences.
Il felt as though there were a million
where 1 then was" was the frank re-
sponse.
Were you afraid?"
'Of course / was. I knew those fell
lows shooting at US weren't doing it for
their health, or for ours, either, and 1
knew enough about guns to know that
they were dangerous"
But you overcame your fear as the
fight progressed?"
Anyhow, / didn't mind it so much.
After awhile l got mad, and then 1 for
got about myself and wanted to lick
the entire army against u.s."
Did you ever get shot?"
"Once only, and it was queer about
that. You read stories in the papers
about how it feels to be shot, and /
suppose they are correct for every man
has a different way of taking his cold
lead. I've seen men shot square in the
foreheads, stand for an instant as if
turned into stone and then drop without
ever bending a joint; some I've seen run
screaming away and fall dead with the
scream on their lips; I've seen some
grab and clutch at themselves and spin
around as if they had been hit with a
club and didn't know what was the
matter; some drop quietly and say
nothing about it; some jump high in
the air and drop stiff as pokers, and SO
on through a list of them, no two alike.
I'm my own case / was fighting in the
woods in a skirmish in Virginia on a
terrific hot day. 1t was lively in there,
l can tell you, and / wasn't thinking
about myself at all. We had started on
run through an open space after the
Johnnies, and just as we slowed down,
when we saw they had got too close to
the main body for us to go after them,
l began to feel sick and weak and told
the man next to me that / thought
must be sunstruck. He began to say
something and everything grew dark.
The next 1 knew I was in a hospital
with a hole though my chest. When
got it or how never knew, but it couldn't
have been more than ten minutes be-
fore collapsed, because man couldn't
stand up long with that kind of a venti-
lator in his BOSOM
The record-union., 1896-04-16
A QUESTION OF BIAS.

In recent cases of murder trials II ha 6
been noticed that an unusual number
Of citizens escape jury duty by declar-
ing that they have such prejudice in the
case that they cannot give the defend
ant a fair and impartial hearing, and
render verdict as the testimony justi-
fies.
The increasing interposition of this
plea has attracted more than ordinary
attention. and gives rise to the ques-
tions, are such pleas true? Are they
sincere or are they not mere excuses to
escape doing duty?
No one viii be disposed to say that II
The record-union., 1896-04-16

man can't be as sick as a woman.
AS mans organization is simpler and
stronger, it follows that his ailments are
less complicated. He is not subject to the
chances and changes, physiological1y, that
come to the average woman.
If a woman is in good health there is no
more healthftil employment than house
work. Generally speaking, there is no hap
pier woman in the world than the one who
is we'll and busy all day long making
home" for dear ones who depend upon
her But how different when every breath
is pain, every step torture This state of
health, in nine cases out of ten comes from
arrangements Of the delicate, feminine or
gans Of generation. The family doctor in
quires first concerning these. He most
usually insists upon an examination. ]"
From this the modest woman naturally
shrinks. She is right. Excepting in very
unusual cases of female weakness" ex-
aminations are unnecessary. Dr. Pierce's
Favorite Prescription is simple, natural
remedy for these ills. 1t cures gradually,
safely, permanently. Here is one testi-
monial out of thousands
Twas i'll four years with female weakness I
took two bottles Of DR.. Pierce's Favorite Pre-
scription. I do my house work now without
pain or faintnesS." Yours truly
The record-union., 1896-04-16

support the statement that such a
communication has been forwarded and
received, and that as yet no answer
has been made to it. Assuming this to
be true, the act of the President is in
harmony with the expression of Con-
gress recently made through concur
rent resolutions. 1t is said that, while
the note contains nothing at which
Spain can take offense, yet it intimates
that very early reply is wanted, and
that if it is not made, there may be
action by the United States Govern
ment without regard to the wishes OF
Spain. We apprehend that when the
text of the note is made public, it will
be found to be dignified, courteous and
just, and that it will put the Spanish
Ministry in the position of either ac-
cepting the offer of good offices prompt
ly and consenting to the opening Of ne
gotiations for settlement. of the Cuban
difficulty or of making fiat refusal and
defiance, in which case the action of
our Government will certainly be
prompt and decisive, and will be an
nounced first in the form of recogni
ton of the belligerency of the insur-
gents. That is to say, it will be scarce
ly possible for Spain to evade direct an
swer, to take any middle ground, or
barter for much delay for consideration.
1t is to be hoped that this is cor
rect forecast of the situation, for it
will relieve public anxiety and bring
the unhappy and bloody contest in
Cuba to an earlier end.
The record-union., 1896-04-16
A VULGAR FAKE.

The alleged confession" Of murderer
Holmes, over which two sensational
sheets have made such fuss, and to
which they have pointed with pride"
as evidence Of enterprise" turns out
to be a common and very vulgar fake,
but comporting well with the character
of the Paul Pry and keyhole sheets in
volved. A lot of the people Holmes is
represented as having murdered are
alive and kicking. This justifies the
belief that as the confession" was
false in these respects, it is unreliable
in all.
This remarkable story, which all de-
cent newspapers We're warned not to re-
print under penalties for violation of
copyright-an unnecessary precaution-
is moreover discredited upon it's very
face. 1t represented a Jeckyll-Hyde fel-
low, one side of whom wrote of the
other side, as if the beings had two dis
tinct existences. The yarn went on to
say and to show that the writer was a
man of clear moral perceptions, of a
sensitive and refined nature, Of cal
culating, logical and strong mind; a
mind horror-stricken at the revelations
Of itself; a nature terrified by its own
brutality; a man whose whole being
loathed itself
This dual fellow was represented,
however, as excusing itself on the
ground of moral deformity; that the one
side Of this monstrosity recognized with
horror that the other side was not re-
sponsible because it was misshapen al
birth, and of the nature Of the vampire:
that it was it's natural function to slay:
that it could no more resist the impulse
than the demands of appetite; a crea-
ture not a grade above the ravenine
beast Of the jungle; a thing that killed
for the very lust of killing.
Such a story was monstrously pre-
posterous, an offense to reason, an in
suit to intelligence, and was accepted
by no one who paused to reason as true.
If Holmes should stand forward on the
scaffold now and repeat 1t, we would
still be disposed to look upon him as a
wretch who had sold himself to the
very last to the purposes of some reck-
less bohemian who barters his con-
science to sensational Journalism that
bawdy sheets may entice nickels from
honest pockets by false pretense
The dispatches Of yesterday indicate
that Holmes is more successful as 2
swindler than a murderer, since he is
represented as having buncoed the two
papers referred to, one in New York and
one in San Francisco, out of a neat spo,
sum for the alleged confession, In which
trick, II that is the truth Of the matter
he, OF course, had the help of some
penny-a-liner. whose word vocabulary
is greater than his knowledge of human
nature or good English
This, Of course, is upon the assumn.
tion that the two newspapers were
fooled. Possibly they were. but thought.
full people, who are accustomed to read
between lines and weigh human motives
well, win conclude, and abide by the
judgment, that the whole thing was q
Peter Funk swindle gotten I'D by the
morbidly sensational Examiner" and
its tender, the chambermaids' owr
Journal OF New York, for the exnress
purpose Of selling as news that which
was known to be fiction; in other words
1t was simply scheme to rob the public
OF its pennies
The record-union., 1896-04-16

The lower house Of Congress has
voted nearly six millions OF dollars
for Notifications and coast defenses
1t is not likely that the SenatezWiH dis
turb the figures The action is wise
and will receive the almost unanimous
approval Of the American people With
the greatest extent of continuous sea-
coast of any nation, we have the least
Of coast defenses and the smallest
measure of naval protection.
The record-union., 1896-04-16

The four-inch line of the Southwest
Pennsylvania Pipe Line Company re-
Gently broke at Hiram McC1ains farm,
in South Franklin township, and about
25O barrels escaped. A dam was hast
iIy thrown across the creek below the
point of the break and most of the pre-
cious fluid saved. Some of Mr. Nc
Claims stock drank of the polluted
water, and a horse, two cattle, and
eight sheep have died from the effects
The record-union., 1896-04-16

It is alleged and denied that Presi-
dent Cleveland has sent note to Spain
Indicating a desire to know at once If
Spain will in a friendly spirit accept
the tender Of the good offices of this
Government in the Cuban matter. The
burden Of evidence. however. seems to
The record-union., 1896-04-16

Special Agencies.
This paper is for sale at the dolloWlns
places: L. P. Fishers. room =, Me, to
principal News Stands and Hotels and al
the Market-street Ferry, San franclsco.
LOS ANGELES Eclectic BOOK Stofe'
corner Second and Main streets.
SAN DIEGO-Emmal & Co., s6o flIl'
street.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS & Cox. Coronado
Hotel.
SANTA BARBARA-Hassinge News
Depot.
FRESNO-C. T. Cearley, I'LL street:
SANTA CRUZ-Cooper Bros. news De-
pot.
Also for sale on all trains leaving and
coming into Sacramento.
Eastern Business Offices.
THE Tribune" Building, New York CITY
Western Business Office, THE Rook'
cry" Chicago.
The S. c. Beckwith Special Agency.
sole agents foreign advertising.
The record-union., 1896-04-16

Colonel Lyman is a resident of Os-
wego. He was born in Jefferson County,
New York, 56 years ago. He was edu-
Gated in common schools, and studied
engineering. He enlisted as a private
in the 141th New York Volunteers, and
was promoted successfully to Lieu
tenant and Adjutant and Breveted
Major. After the war he engaged in
business; was Lieutenant-Colone of a
regiment of National Guard: was cleo
ted to various town Offices and in 1872
was elected Sheriff of Oswego County.
He was~made Collector of the Port of
Oswego by President Harrison in 1889,
and was appointed a member of the
Forest, Fish and Game Commission by
Governor Morton last year.
The record-union., 1896-04-16
NEW YORK EXCISE LAW.
Commissioner Appointed by Governor
Morton.

The new excise measure in New
York State, known as the Raines law,
abolishes all local boards and establishes
a State department, placed under the
charge of a Commissioner. Governor
Morton has appointed Colonel Henry
H Lyman the first occupant Of that
office
The record-union., 1896-04-16

The wife of Joseph Wellman of West
Cape May preseted him with a baby
daughter the other day. She is the
first female born in his family in 100
years.-Bridgeton IN. j. Chronicle.
The record-union., 1896-04-16
What a great GUAM

tity of work a good
housekeeper +" finds
to do! F! There are
so many little time
and strength taking
chores that have no
\ names. And it must
all be done whether
the house k eper
7 feels like it or not.
This is true of mems
work too, but mems
IN a n ual labor is
never SO complicated
as housekeeping. In
some way or other
l " the worlds work
must be done. 4"
This iron-clad rule is
harder on women
than it is on men. A
The record-union., 1896-04-16
,l-.., aZNz VI. #ez
Lyme Center, Grafton Co. n.

Send II cents in one-cent stamps TO Worlds
Dispensary Medical Association, Buffalo, N "
and receive DR.. Pierce's 1908 page coH1ToeG
S8Ns. MEDICAL ADVISER, pxofasely illustrated.
The record-union., 1896-04-16
THE WEEKLY UNION

t12 Pages.
Is the cheapest and most desirable h3me, 10 n,,
News and Literary Journal publlsneo Oh
the Pacific Coast. e1 6n
These publications are sent sns1e eisher s,,b. ~
Mail or Express to agents OF sinSio Hsi post- S
scriberS with charges prepaAo'
masters are agents. -. +ba
The best advertising mediums on 'ne
Pacific Coast.
The record-union., 1896-04-16

Entered at the Postoffice at Sacramento
as second-claSS matter.