davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The oasis., 1896-02-15
Cure for Headache.

As remedy for all forms of Head ache Electric Bitters has proved to be the very best. It effects permanent cure and the most dreaded habitual SICK headaches yield to it's influence. We urge all who are afflicted to pro- cure bottle, and give this remedy a fair trial. In cases of habitua: consti- patton Electric Bitters cures by giv- ing the needed tone to the bowels. and few cases long resist the use of this medicine. Try it once. Fifty cents and sl at Chenoweth & Mlx's Drug Store.
The oasis., 1896-02-15
FRATERNAL SOCIETIES.

NoRs1o~ Ledge No. @.
 10. O. IF. Officers: Al Peck N. G.; Richard II. Clarke, " G.: B. Mix, T.; Ed. Plerson. S. Regular meetings every Thursday evening at 7:31 o'clock. AL PECK, N. C.. E. L. PERSON, secy'
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

One of the grand officers of the Native
Sons was visiting a parlor of the order
in Butler county recently. At roll call
he observed that quite a number had
been absent from the last meeting.
" hen the time for making constitutions
al excuses came the president said:
Worthy vice president, the Cfficer
stood up-"yoU were absent from the
last meeting. What legal excuse have
you to offer therefor ?"
Il couldn't coon it." he replied and
sat down again.
Your excuse is accepted"
The visiting official puzzled over the
excuse for an hour. He could not under
stand the reply. Finally. at recess, he
went to the vice president 10 interpret
his excuse.
We'll" he said. there is quite large
stream between my residence and the
town, and there are no bridges across IL
nothing but a barbed wire fence.
The coons creep across the creek on
this wire. and at the time OF the lass
meeting the water in the creek was 50
high that l couldn't wade IL, neither
could 1 coon the barbed wire San
Francisco Post
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05
4 RAILROAD PUZZLE.
Mysterious Noises Produced By Trains on
Southern Road.

Southern Road.
Between the 70 and 50 mile posts on
the Carolina Central railroad there =
a piece Of track for distance of nearly
six miles that presents a singular con-
ditioa that so far amounts TO an in
applicable mystery. All trains going
and coming go TO grinding and start
2 terrible squeaking when they get on
this six miles of track. The noise comes
from not only one car. but every loco
motive, every coach. and every car OF
whatever kind sets mp a grinding as
il turning q curve. The noise is some
thing like the screeching Of an OK
cart that has 10 grease on il, and il is
made by every truck on a train. The
track is perfectly straight. ard as there
is no curve at al the cause of the grind
ing and squeaking has mystified the
railroad people. Every effort has been
made to ascertain the cause of the diff
ficulty. The locomotives have been ex.
amined. the coaches and cars have been
scrutinized, every crOss-1ie and every
rail has been inspected. every Joint has
HFNA 4ADhEA d. anu every IUOL OF llc
track has been regauged, but no ex-
PLANTATION could be found. The section
master has almost crawled over the
six miles on his knees in search Of the
cause. The roadmaster has tried his
best TO ferret out the matter. and the
superintendent has been over the track
and inspected it-all o. them making re-
Peated efforts time and again TO find ont
W hat is the matter-but they have
given il up as a bad Job. They have not
only not been able 10 discover the
cause of the noise. but have been IN
able to discover any theory TO explain
the mystery. II is one Of the railroad
mysteries Of the age. and has been
going on for 20 years. During that
time the cross-ties and rails have bcea
replaced several times with new ones,
bat without effect.-St Louis Globs
Democrat
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05
damned Fingers.

Few people have escaped jammea
fingers, and as the pain caused when
the finger is jammed in door Is eN,
cruciating in the extreme for the ffs'
few minutes, it is we'll to know OF SOM
means of relief The finger should 10
plunged into water as hot as can llos.
sibly be borne. This application OF nos
water causes the nail TO expand anu
soften, and the blood pouring out De-
meath it has more room to flow; ihu,
the pain is lessened. The finger shouH
then be wrapped in n bread-and-"a'5,i,
poultiee. A jammed finger shou."
never be neglected, as 1t may leao "
modification of the bone II II has Detl'
badly crushed, and amputation OF t"e
finger must follow. damned toes ",
usually caused through the falling =
heavy weights and should be tr'a''u
in the same way as a jammed finger
st. Louis Republic.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05
SOME PLURaLS-

Wen begin With \ bo1. and the plural Is
Bur the plural Of o1 should Be oxen. net
oxss
Thea one fozi Is : goozs. but two are
called geess=
let tie plural q mrEss should never be
meese=
You nay find : lurs .nouse O whole nesi
Ct mics.
But The p.ara. e house Is houses. not
II the plural ,. nan s always called men,
Why shousfat tie plural Of paa De called
The coz Il the plural nay Be cows or
But bow # repeated Is never called
-. the plural Of Tox Is VOWS. never vine.
~ I speak Of foot and you show me your
feet.
And I gre you boos. would a pair be
called hestF
II one Is tooth and whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural Of booth be
called beezhz
II the singulzE's tbs and the plural Is
these
Should the plural 81 Kiss ever be nick
named keeszz
Then one may D that aHd three would be
those.
Yet hat in the plural would never Be hose,
And the plural q eat Is cats. aoi cose-
We SPEAK Of brother. and also Of
brethren.
But though We say mother. We never say
methrsu.
Then the masculine pronOuHs are he. his
and him.
Gut imagine the feminine she. shis and
shin.
80 the English. I think you all viii agree,
Is the queerest language you ever did see
Common wealth
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05
CARDINAL CASCAJAREs' CAREER
Prince of the Church Exchanged His
sword for Stole.

The principles of phrenology as laid
down by Gall, Lavater and other teach
ers have their ardent disciples as well
as their dibelieyers; but whether they
be true or false there is a cardinal, a
member Of the present college. who as
cribes TO their theories the GROWING
success of his life.
Some weeks ago Don Antonio Casca-
jares, archbishop of Xaliadolid. Spain.
called upon Senior Bosch. the Spanish
minister of public works, to announce
his elevation TO the rank of cardinal
and receive his minister's eongratnla-
tions. They were heartily given and the
new cardinal then made the following
explanation of his visit:
Il wished you to be The first TO con-
graduate me. shall tell you why. One
day when you, Senior Bosch. were about
70 years old, your father, Migual Bosch,
took you to his friend, Senior Indalecio
Mateo. then minister of ceremonies at
the court, in order to have him admire
your peculiar talent for the exact sci
.ences. As you and your father entered
the room OF Mateo. the latter was talk
ing to a captain of artillery. You were
subjected TO an examination. and the
three men, Senior Mateo. your father and
the captain. were astonished at the IN
usual talent of the boy. The subject
of phrenology then came up. Your
father was an ardent advocate of the
teachings of Gall, but the captain. on
the other hand, had no faith in them.
After your father had defended his
point OF view with all possible argu-
ments he proposed, half in jest and half
in earnest, to examine the head OF his
adversary. the captain. The latter
readily submitted. After Senior Bosch
had passed his fingers over the captain
Uranium. he said:
MY examination proves that you
will never amount to much as a soldier
The bump of combativeness is unusual
~ small. On the other hand, mildness.
humility and religion are extremely
highly developed. l feel certain that il
you exchange the sword for the stole
and the uniform for the priests coat,
you viii become 4 cardinal"
a short time after this meeting he
captain resigned the army and entered
a seminary, and the prophesy Of your
father was fulfilled. The captain IS a
cardinaEfor Twas the captain. ~. Y.
Trfbura
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

Years ago there were stin poisoned
arrows used occasionally. weapons
deadI5er than the popular rifle or car
bine. for their scratch was fatal. The
head was dipped IN a poison curiously
rlade. j DIT Of liver. quite putrid, was
held before . rattlesnase until he had
injected his venom into il time and
tine again. After a few more days
this FiFHleHJ substance was put upon
the points Of the arrows. TO carry agony
ard dissolution 70 whatsoever they
touched
L ssas one Of these arrows that How.
land i-rked from his arm, a few mo-
menfs later. as he went into the hut
where his ftyo soldiers were waiting.
lie held Il IN front Of the candle and
examined i intently, while the blood
dFipped oFer his dusty boot. One of
the men asked him how il had hap
peBed. while he cut open the sleeve.
i mistake. very likely. It was not one
Of the bucks; We parted good friends"
The woman he did not mention He
looked al the arrow again. Its poi
soBed. 7 guess Rather hard luck" he
sid. He passed one hand across his
face YEARLY, and repeated: Hard
luck" Then he gave the men a de-
tailed account OF what be had done and
accomplished. that they might tell the
major N ease he himself should be past
speaking. The agency doctor was of
On two-days' hunting "trip, 50 the sol
diers bathed and dressed the wound
and made Rowland drink TIE contents
Of large flask of whisky. But he or
dcred his horse and went back to the
post. nevertheless. across the long,
cleaning plain OF sand. under the pur-
pie arch with lis stars of glimmeriDg
gold; three weird. dark figures follow
ing the road through the night.
And just as the gray dawn came over
the far-of black mountains. Just as the
dawn breeze sprang up and blew on his
swollen and burning face. just as the
first call for reYeille shrilled through
the valley, two dust-whitened riders,
supporting him in his saddle, drew up
at the hospital.
1t two o'clock stretcher carried the
BODY Of Lieut. Rowland from the hos
pifal TO his quarters: and the flag was
put al half-mast.-San Francisco Ar.
pouauf
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

T5ttIe Wlnnie's gone away
Cone awayi

Little Wlnnie's gone away
Gone away
Gone away for good'n all;
Peen here with US since last fan.
scoldlng. kissing. romping round;
V-sr'r her Ike atop of ground
Kept US feeling gay.
Now the fidget's gone away
Gone away!
little Winnie's gone away
Gone away
With her plaid waist in bundle,
And her umbrell, off she'd trunale
Though l almost cried boo-hoo.
Il can't always stay with you
That was all shed say.
Little Minnie's gone away
Gone away
Little Winnie's gone away
Gone away
Asked a good-by kiss, but no
Won't have any left for joe
So gave her one, for she
Couldn't give Joe's kiss to me.
Las, alackaday.
Little Winnie's gone away
Gone away.
Philip A. Barker. in Chicago Record
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05
STICKING TO THE FARM.

Don't draw the papzrs. lawyer. Yxe
changed my mind. you see.
For wife and have had a talk and both ..
Us agree
That. though the times are pretty hard ard
troubles round Us swarm.
And life amt what It used 70 b. ve VII
aot sell the farm
/ stood upon the knoll to-day and looked
the CID place Ger
I thought ii never looked 50 FRESH ar1
beautiful before.
The clover had Fedder hue. the creek :
swEetsr song.
And over in the 7zsture stood the herd. :
notified throng-
The vanished scenes Of ofher days came
back my soul to thrill.
Again heard my AZ 5 song upon the wos5-
ed hill
A sturdy boy welded f. and whtstssd 4,
ny toll
A farmers urchin. stout znd brown. =
product Of the sol
o. TIE long nights Of the winter. vh.n -
fore the roaring blaze
sat and porsss enrzpturet Ger sfzezsliss-=
stirring lays
Until ADORE the Soy wind that swept zeross
the ridge
I seemed 10 hear the shout OF brave Horz-
tius ~ ths bridge.
why, On the farm which zg= eross zith
steps little slow
grpw 10 staI~srz zznhoos Il TIE eher-
Sshe1 long ago
I whfstts5 there behind the rtow ard With
I cut the golden BEARDED grain fer forty
years. ween-
rnto the house where Vas bern ozs 6zT
brought bride.
All Hannah James beloved face has zevsr
left uy side.
Beneath that roof we've lived ard Planned.
ard thsr~ the children ved.
Ard tx.cs IN that old farmhouse dear IL
tie one lay dead
We've talked the matter over. Hznnsh
Jane ard ]. to-day.
know ! said I'd sell he farm 70 Banker
Ezra Gray;
But you needn't draw the papers p. fer
this old hand Of mine
Ny name uDon the cruel desd VII never.
never sign
II might have been the clover. or the birds
that filled the wood
With just the sweetest songs. while upon
the hin stood.
II may have been good Hannahs kiss. 50
loving and 80 kind.
Put. then. II makes no difference. for l have
changed my mind
Let Ezra keep his money. he can use Il b.
and BY.
For when we two old people in the little
churchyara lie,
Our bows who live whore thousands IN the
mighty cities swarm
VIII ask for division and they'll let him
have the farm.
But while we live It shall not pass beyond
these hands Of mine.
So Ezra Gray can bide his time. the deed
we VIII not sign:
For sixty years upon the farm my good
old wife and
Have shared the griefs and Joys Of life and
there in peace well die.
Yes. let us call the farm our own until the
summons come
And we have passed beyond the gates Of
the Eternal Home.
SO burn the papers, lawyer. and I'll 90 tack
and say
To Hannah Jane, the farm is ours until we
pass away.
IT c. HarnaUgh. in Ohio Farmer.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05
THE POISON OF LOVE.
by GwEsDoLEN ovERToN.

The commanding officer was seated
in the adjutant's Office. IN troubled par
ley with the officer of the day
1t was high noon, midsummer, and
Arizona; and though the adobe was as
cool as only an adobe can be in fiery
weather, the major was hopping his
brow in entire discomfort.
That's it. that's it," he calculated.
Think of sending man off ON the very
eve Of his wedding; the sSry day before
he is to be married. It's beastly IN
pleasant thing to have 10 do. But I'm
too old for q trip like that; Gowan's on
the sick list, Henderson, away. Thomp-
sons wife may die any minute, Trow-
bridge won't be back from Grant until
early tomorrow morning. and your
half dead (precious hospital we have! }
End officer OF the day besides. Then
moreover, Howland's about the only
one who can handle those things right
md not make mess of it. He's got to
20, that's all"
81 might be able to manage the bust
ness; suppose you let him take my
saber. and III go" suggested Briggs.
"You look like it, now don't you
Pretty healthy specimen you'd be to
send on a ride like that"
1T wouldn't hurt me and it might do
me good. ask II as a favor, major
well, | won't. Howland's going
He rang the bell for his orderly and sent
that unduly erect individual to find
Lieut.. Rowland, give him the command
ing officers compliments. and say he
would like TO see him in the ad Jutant's
Office Immediately.
When the orderly had gone on his WAY
saluting. Briggs tilted back in his chair.
with its burnt ornament of o NJ. d.
and fingered his saber knot, and
watched the flies circling with a faint
buzz in the center of the room. The
eommandani turned his attention TO a
legal-cap document much underscored
end lined in red ink, and glanced un-
easily at the door. The official paper
did not claim his attention long. He
can start now and be back by noon to-
InorroW."
- 7AAAA Al w Nalls
Il suppose he'll see the reason for il. y
Il suppose So. assensed Briggs.
'He's sensible Fellow
"Yes. he's sensible Briggs agreed.
The major felt that his junior officer
vas not exactly encouraging. "Wha;
the deuce would you have me do then -
he snapped.
LET me 60"
Your as pig headed as Donkey
Numbered the major. You shan't 90
/ tel you"
"All right, but I'd rather not be
around when you send Rowland. that's
al rs rude Interruption Of loves
young dream You've nv sympathy.
rs you've got the talking 10 do. Here
h. e0mes- Shall help you out, or nav
] sO?- asked the brave soldier, rising
and looking longir giy toward the door
Go. 20 by all means. and leave me the
nasty job
Briggs resumed his seat. his saber
cianked and he knocked down an ARMY
Eegis:er for ~ While he was picking
il up Rowland came in. He was the
most prcmising officer in the regiment.
ana was tall. and strong. and homely
lie had a square jaw and a straight
snouih. and the jaw looked squareF and
til mouth straishter jlst now. he fore
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

Even royal folks are not always luN,
uriously comfortable. The queen ..
servia, for instance, eschews the so'
bed and avoids the down pillow as 7''
would the plague. She sleeps on a hS
row diYan spread with a hard, un! ',''
ing mattress aud without the t'si'A
of pillow. She has her reward, ho'
ever, in the possession Of the best .f'
and the moS' stately carriare ~ 80
Europe's royalty Chicago Irib'i'
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

RED OF into the shadow. with a low
snarl-
Late a. night. As Howard eft the
council Of the braves. a hundred yards
from the camp a woman STROBE up 10
him. and without any preface, dropped
NJ his feet and csrsht his hands, and re-
peatei TIE siorg Of her savage passion
n the same monutone. as tinkling and
musical Is the sound Of a crystal -.
But Rowland had completed his en-
hassY successfully. and was in haste 10
return 70 the camp during the night
and comparative GOODNESS. 50 he pushed
her away With Disguised -VamoOse!
and hurried On.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

A prominent physician claims that
there viii be no liphtheria. scarlet
fever nor WORMS for children II they
cat plentifully OF onions every day. es-
pecially when there is a scarcity Of
fresh fruit He buys onions for his
young folks. and they are served in
every imaginable FORM ST. Louis Re
public.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

1t is not generally known that The
word dollar appears in Shakespeare 5
,s forks. being used in Measure fer Meas
ure. written in los. in act ], scene 2.
To $4,000 a year; in Macbeth. written
IN 1900. act ]. scene 2. where burial is
refused TO Sweno's men until Ten
thousand dollars 10 our general use"
have been paid.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

Our nickel coins are really ms
named. and should be styled copper
coins. The three cent nickel contains
IS per cent. Of copper and only Is Per
cent. Of nickel. The ordinary five cent
nickel in common use has the same
proportions Of copper and nickel. three
fourths q the former and one-I9urlL
% The latter.
The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1896-09-05

The Spanish province of Puerto
Rico last year imported from the United
States lls,si7 barrels Of -four, valued at
$50, G15.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1896-09-10
Worthy of Thought.

LII dU 1ISU YOU OtOA OUOOON, ~ |
it on the other fellow.
Even in the dullest times the
teamster does driving business.
Study how to do yourduty, rath-
er than how to do your fellow men.
A good way to avoid the pay
ment of bills is not to contract them.
There is an over production OF
beer caused by over-consumptlon.
Some people are brain workers,
but they work other people S brains.
Cultivate the ambition to be
famous, but work for the right
kind of fame
Everything comes to him who
waits-the maturity Of note at
bank for instance.
The second great American revo-
luton seems to be the revolution
of the bicycle wheels.
Whether everybody can go to
heaven or not, everybody can bring
a little heaven down here.
Bows. don't stick to the old farm
but stick to new one that is up
to date in modern methods.
Before you call your boy lazy
ond cbiftlacs find ont for sure lust
what his father was at that age.
Frequently when you sign note
.'as a mere matter of form" you
have to pay it as matter Of neces-
sity.
There are some people who go
to the devil. There are others
who invite the devil to come to
them.
The farm owes you living if
you get it in your debt by putting
it in the proper condition for yield
ing crops.
If all misdeeds and crimes that
are meditated we're committed, how
horrible would be the condition Of
the world.
Blessed is he that hungers anc
thirsts after righteousness, for that
is about the only thing the trusts
don't control.
The word ''safety'' as applied t.
a bicvcle. refers to the one wh'
rides it and not to the one wh'
collides with it.
They say talk is cheap, and We
words are apt to come high dun
ing heated discussion OF the cur
rency question.
Wait till the clouds roll by.
they don't roll fast enough manu-
facture your own sunshine an
drive them away.
Don't condemn the girl that 20
hear is fast" Reference may t
made to her dexterity on the bic.
Gle or the typewriter.
The hen-pecked man is after a
the one who wouldn't amount
ANYTHING if he didn't have ju
that kind of treatment.
When you consider your ov
troubles, think Of the poor felloV
who don't know where they star
on the currency question.
Practice reciprocity with yo
animals. Do good things for the
in return for the good servlc
you expect them to render you.
If the stranger at your gate
sists on your signing somethi
for him, make a sign to the falt
full dog that his services are needle
They say good deed is reco1
ed in heaven. but all the same
deed of that kind is no good on
abstract if you want to borr
money on it.
Blessed are you when men
vile and abuse you, and say
manner of evil things against y
for verify you stand good sh
of being elected.
Study the issues of the ca
paign from the standpoint OF b
mess Judgment. Better to let
party follow you than to bin
follow your party.
Whether the policy Of the g
bug or the silver-bug prevails
this country, the humbug
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1896-09-10
Three Opinions:

..The CHICAGO RECORD is model
newspaper i'm every sense of the word. ~
Harrisburg (Pa.) CALL
..T11ere is no paper published in America
that so nearly approaches the true Journal
istic ideal as The CHICAGO RECORD. -
From "Newspaperd0m" New York;.
81 have come to the firm conclusion, after
a long test and after a wide comparison
with the journals of many cities and coun-
tries. that The CHICAGO RECORD comes
as near being the ideal daily journal as we
are for some time likely to find on these
mortal Shores ''-Prof. j. I. Hatfield i'm
The Evanston (W.) Index.
Sold by newsdealers everywhere and subscriptions
received BY all postmasters. Address THE CHI
CAGO RECORD, ISL Madison-st.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1896-09-10
WANTED-AN IDEA %s soS 4sn s tniPs

thing to patent? Protect your Ideas theX may
bring YOU wealth. Write JOHN WEDDEh~
BURN & CO., Patent Attorneys, washington,
b. C., for their s., 800 prize offer.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1896-09-10

Some people are brain workers,
but they work other peoples brains.
The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1896-09-10

Whether the policy of the gold
bug or the silver-bug prevails in
this country, the humbug will
still be represented.
Western Plowman, Moline, LII.