Twice-a-week plain dealer. (Cresco, Howard County, Iowa) 1895-1913, 1896-04-14
THAT ONION TABOO.
Spanish Vegetable Boycott May
Lead to Trouble.
Action of Preachers in Youngstown, o.,
Has Far-Reaching Possibilities For
eign Nations May Retaliate by Twist
ing Tail of American Hog.

Shall the Spanish onion be relegated
to the bottom shelfof thepantry or hung
in effigy? Chicago restaurant propri-
etors we're asking themselves this ques-
ton after reading the report of a minis
ters' banquetat1 Youngstown o, the 9TH
err night, where the patriotic guests re-
fused to eat the onions set before them
because they We're Spanish onions.
The preachers passed resolutions de-
claring that no one in sympathy with
the gallant struggle Cuba is making
fer liberty could consistently, persist
emily and knowingly partake of the
Spanish onion.
1t was strong stand for the Youngs-
town preachers to take, and it's gem
eral effect on patriotic Americans is
likely to be far reaching. Not only will
tie lovers of Cuba shed tears when the
Spanish onion is cut in their pres
ence and refuse to partake of it, but
the Chicago restaurant men fear even
rtore complications, says the Tribune.
The people who sympathize with
Venezuela in it's little difficulties with
England are likely to haughtily spurn
English mullins, while those who are
Mortified at the Armenian atrocities
will refuse to enter a restaurant where
turkey is sold. The citizens who do
not side with Kaiser Wilhelm in the
Transvaal matter will pass up the Ger
man pancake, and the citizen who re-
joices in the victories of King Menelek
will turn down the festive Italian spag-
hctti.
If the threatened crash comes be-
tween the European powers the bill of
fare in American restaurants will be
smashed to smithereens. French peas,
Russian caviarc, Danish mackerel,
Swiss cheese and Spanish olives will
AL be repudiated.
Railroad restaurant keepers are in a
frightful stew over the new method of
expressing national sentiments. Incase
the deposed Queen Liliuolsalani should
win the approval of the travelling pub
lie the American lunch counter is
doomed. People would refuse to eat
sandwiches. Thus would they show
their detestation of the islands which
Geposed Liliuokalani.
The most serious consequences would
arise in case the people of the En-
erald Isle again declared for freedom.
For all who were opposed to them
would throw down one of the greatest
Industries of the Countrywide raising
of the irishpotato. Itishardly probable
the thoughtlcss men dressed in black,
who sat down to the banquet at
Youngstown and trampled upon the
Spanish onion, thought of these things.
Some of them, possibly, will not hap
pen for some time, but the wars of
South America will occur every few
minutes, and the national troubles in
Mexico would keep the steward at a
hotel in q cold sweat rushing cans and
bottles back and forth TO prevent ma
tional complications. Chilli sauce,
which would be immensely popular one
day. would be q CORY object on the floor
the next. Brazil nuts, which this week
,vnnL n1n all ,.le>.<,r,-,+l, as Tie CUES its sat
around the table at Sunday dessert and
told stories, would be used for NUM-
tions OF war when the morning papers
were opened next day.
The abdication of the president of
tho republic south OF the Rio Grande
would be followed by direful slump in
the Mexican bean market. Everywhere
would be confusion and distrust.
The worst trouble of all would be
in an expression of the animosities be-
tween different sections of our land.
Florida oranges would be tabooed on
the western slopes, while California
wines would mix with the waters of
the st. Johns. Maine Goldfish would
not wiggle their dried and saltcd tails
i'll the states where Tom Reed is a dis
pleasing person, and when Mai. Nc
hinley was not over popular Ohio buck
eyes would be down-trodden. Mary
land oysters would be dead loss in
some sections, while civil war might
result over an insult to Boston baked
beans.
Chicago is more interested in the
Spanish onion incident than any other
American city. AS soon as the news
gets abroad foreign nations will adopt
rctaliatory methods. They will twist
the tail of the American hog.