The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1896-01-29
NITORO-GLYCERINE AND VINE
GAR.

GA X.
BROTHER BOTTOMLEY DIPS HIS
PEN IN GALL AND SHOWS UP
SOME OF THE ABSURDITIES OF
THE AGE-HIS "PONDEROSITY"
CLEVELAND-"THE COWTAIL AID
VANCEMENT" OF THE NEW WON
AN"-"THE WORLD is OUT OF
JOINT."-A LETTER WORTH READ
ING.
Editor of Representative"
We do not read that any one but Nero
was fiddling while Rome was burning;"
but we have whole orchestra Of fiddlers,
scraping away, while our once great and
glorious country is being reduced into
what will soon be as low a condition -
China. Let us instance the tune our bass,
or rather base, fiddler in Washington,
plays in his annual message. While one
half of our people are overloaded With
everything to satisfy the inner man, and
the other half are in an almost starving
conditional caused by gang of human
vampires. who stand between the consum>
er and the prOducer,-.hS modern Nero
issues a message which for merely, inn
penetrable density, beats a London fog,
almost as bad as he has beaten the Amerl-
can people. With our once free govern
ment in the throes of dissolution, his
"Ponderosity" commences his imbecile
mumbling by stating that our cordial
relations with France had been ruff1ed by
- NE Imprisonment of a Yankee sharper
named Waller, who used and abused his
official position for private gain No Won
der, though, that the incident ruff1ed the
feathers of our political buzzards, for II
French methods obtained a foot-hold here,
My; but wouldn't there be a boom in
building jails and making striped suits.
After lucid interval. in which he states
that Germany refuses to trade with Us
because we will not trade fair, he lapses
again and drivels about, "the importance
Of fair divide of the glaciers Of Alaska,
md the waters of the great lakes" Then,
like the new woman" trying to regulate
everybody but themselves, he goes to
sticking his finger into every nations pie.
HE is concerned in the disordered condi-
ton of affairs in China 1.-The massacres
the lions tail if it puts its paw on Ven-
ezuela, etc." This is all we get, while
Dur people are having an Empire stolen
from under their feet. mo not ALL he
would give us the dishonest and dishon-
orable interest-bearing national bank
dollar, in exchange for the only
free, equitable, and honest dollar
that ever was issued by our gov
ly self-respecting peoplt to that Of a pack
Of cringing sychophants.
But enough of the big base; as / want
to call attention to a few of the other I'D
dlers. There is the new woman" for in
stance she would set the world to right.
by donning ''bloomers" and riding strad
die. she boasts Of the advancements she
has already made. (see article "The
Women in Rep. Of Jan. Sth), what does
this really mean: simply this. that they
have pushed so many of their sons, broth
ers. husbands. and intended husbands out
Of work, by cutting under on the wages
In other words. If they were men, We
should call them scabS." Who rakeS ir
the shekels on the deal 1.-The employers
OF course" What Is the sum total every
city in our land and every highway in tht
country is crowded with unemployed men
skilled and unskiled. learned and un
learned. all elbowed into the street by
their sisters wives and sweethearts, whf
instead Of helping to settle the "coloret
problem" in the natural way, have bret
the "rooming house." the fiat" and tn
"hash counter and filled them with
premature withered, wrinkled and gray
unwholesome looking lot of Kitty Cling
and Miss Polards. whose boasteth of
false gift Is like clouds and wind withou
rain;' thus said Solomon the wise. Thi
Is just what this so-called advancement
Of women is,-"wind and clouds withou
rain"
do practical business men act in thi
manner. not they. when they wish t
raise the price Of an article they lmi
Its production, when our women wish t
raise the price Of the only article the
petition with the male members of thei
families. and what ought to be, their fu
ture husbands. and reduce wages below
decent housekeeping standard. The NAL
clerk or bookkeeper could formerly ge
from 50 to SO dollars per month; on thes
wages he could afford to marry, thereb
keeping his present competitor out of tn
labor market, besides becoming a create
consumer of all kinds Of labor products
then he is patron of the "rooming
house and the hash factory" and
traveller on the trucks Of freight cars.
At present, as we learn from the bes
authority,-lady bookkeepers, clerks, ster
ographers. etc. can be hired for less tina
the cost of decent board. We all kno
= what that menas,-loveless and mercenar
marriages at the best; prostitution, blaci
mailing. and petty stealing at the wors
- What a cow-tail advancement our won
en- have made indeed, led by handful
brazen straddling hermaphorodites!
was no imaginary scene of the futur
where in "Caezar's Column" Mr.. Dol
nelly describes the young women Of tt
period as splendid animals, he has M
them already and they have froze tt
genial current Of his SOUL" by their har
brassy, unwoman1y looks.
We called 1t cow-tail advancement and
is There is,-it is said, but one step b
tween the sublime and the ridiculous, Il
new woman" has taken that step. 81
has swung around the circle and is cor
ing out at the same place she went
at for, If the educated women suppla
the men in the higher and more genie
occupations of life, their more unfortuna
sisters will supplant them in the lows
dirty and laboriOus occupations. tn
brings us again. to the lowest round