The Lambertville record. [volume] (Lambertville, N.J.) 1872-1968, 1896-06-17
MIR. MEEK'S DINNER.

81 wonder, James," said Mrs. Meek
doubttffuiiy 10 iieT husband; ono mourning,
"if you could get your own dinner to-
night You see, I've had to let the
servant go on her holidays for day or
two, and they want me desperately at
the Woman's Aid and Relief bazaar, to
help them with their high tea from A 80
to $3.50. If you thought you could man.
age by yourself
'I'll try to survive it, observed Mr.
Meek good naturally. I don't fancy it
will prove fatal
''Ill get roast and cook it this
morning, then," went on Mrs Meek
cheerfully, land you can have it cold
for dinner
''Thank you." replied Mr.. Meek,
you'll do nothing of the kind. fancy
I haven't gone camping pretty much ev-
cry year of my life for nothing. sus-
pect can manage hot dinner about as
we'll as most women.
| Mrs. Meek had her doubts, and unlike
most wives. expressed them.
Mr.. Meek viewed his wife's doubts
with supreme contempt. and unlike
most husbands. expressed it
Thus it finally resulted that Mrs.
Meek abandoned all idea of preparing
Mr.. Meek's dinner for him, and betook
herself to the bazaar So it resulted,
furthermore, that Mr.. Meek left his Of
fec about O'Clock that afternoon and
| proceeded to collect on his way home
the necessary supplies for dainty little
dinner.
An alluring display of chickens was
the first thing to catch his eye, and he
was just on the point of securing one of
them, when, by good luck, or more
probably through the natural sagaoity
of the man, he recollected that-well,
that you don't. as a rule. cook chickens
as they are. In the momentary reaction
that followed this feat of memory, he
bought couple of mutton chops and
three tomatoes
'I'll have good, plain, old fashioned
English dinner, " thought he, as no hur-
ried past the deceitful chickens with
something almost akin to reproaoh.
None of your finicky poultry dinners
for mel"
by Jovei' he exclaimed moment
later I'm have an apple pudding and
some oyster soup to begin on. "
He was so tickled with this idea that
he promptly rushed into grocery shop
and purchased half peck of their best
eating apples and then hurried home
without thought of the cab he was to
order for his wife at $3.50 sharp.
By o'clock he had the fire going
beautifully and everything ready for a
start
By O'Clock he was just beginning to
enjoy tho thing; the tomatoes were
stewing divinely; the potatoes were
boiling to their hearts content and the
milk for the oyster soup was simmering
contentedly on the back of the stove.
The oysters, by the bye. had not yet ar
rived.
Dear me" thought the ambitious
gentleman, 81 wish had thought Of it
in time and I'd have had some oyster
patties for sort Of final dessert. Hello,
what's this2 BY thunder, If that ever
lasting pig headed woman hasn't left
me some cold ham and custard piel
By the Lord Harry, for Q cents I'd throw
the whole thing out into the back yard"
The natural docility of his nature,
however, prevailed, and he left the OBJ
noxious viands unmolested and proceed
ed with his dinner. At $3.50 he put the
chops on to broil, las in the good old
days of yore'--this poetic allusion to
the style of cooking being occasioned by
one of them accidentally dropping into
the fire, whence he rescued 1t with great
presence of mind by the joint assistance
of the stove litter and one of the best
table napkins BY the time the chop
was thus rescued both it and the table
napkin were fairly we'll done-to say
nothing stronger. This trifiing difficulty
he got over by putting the erring chop
ON the window sill to cool and the nap
kin into the fire-to do the other thing.
This accomplished, and with one chop
gently cooking on the gridiron and tho
other one cooling on the window sill,
he started to construct the paste for his
apple pudding. This proved most fas-
cinating. He placed large quantity Of
-four In small bowl. emptied % jug Of
water ON top Of ii, added butter to
taste, and proceeded to mold it deity
into shape, as he had often seen his
wife do. The -four and water promptly
forsook the bowl and betook themselves
to his hands Then the milk for the
soup began to burn, inst as the potatoes
boiled dry. He rushed to the rescue and
left the major portion of the paste fair
ly evenly divided between the handles
of the two saucepans and the stove lift
or. At this junetnre the tomatoes started
in to see il they couldn't surpass the
milk in burning They succeeded. The
cat, which was accustomed to 0 80
dinner, walked Off with the chop ON the
window sill, while the chop ON the fire
grew beautifully black ON the "down
side" So many things were now burn
ing all at the same time that Mr.. Meek
gave up all hope Of trying to discover
just which one was burning most. "Let
the dashed things burn till they're sick
of itr' was the extremely broad minded
way in which he summed up the situa-
ton. With the astuteness that charac-
terized him as distinguished from his
fellow men, he at once gave up all ef-
fOrts 10 tFaCk INC Lrutnt paSto, hiu ciiu-
ply popped his apples into the oven to
bake.
1t was now about Z 80. and the fire
0as getting hotter than pretty much
anything ON earth, unless perhaps it
was Mr.. Meek. He turned all the damp
,rs. opened all the doors, and took off
all the lids This resulted most salts
factorily; the fire began to cool 1t
didn't stop.
1t got, il anything. little low. Aft
er that it got very low. Then 1t went
out He rushed for kindlipg. and
nearly took his head off on q clothes
line Just as he had got nicely through