Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1896-08-29
POOR JILSON'S DREAM
he Plans to strangle All the Citys Chanti-
cheers.
Easily Locates the Neighbour Birds,
but the Parkway Fowls Pux-
Hle Him.

washington Is dear good old town, but
there are instances where it drops back in
to tho yellow past with a great deal of
ease, as If it had never emerged from a
large struggling village. Now, why is it
that people living in city insist on keep
Ing chickens? Why maintain in thickly
populated districts the hilarious rooster,
the cock that crows in the morn? Why
Should the hero of the barnyard interrupt
the slumber Of the citizen who does not
have to SHOW up at Office until 8 o'clock ?
Jilson. In our neighborhood, has been
having a very serious time with the fowls,
which he declares are, like Sheridans In
dams. good only when they are dead. Jill
son Is a patient man. More than this, he
is peaceful and dislikes disturbances. He
will almost move before he will make a
complaint to a neighbor. If he lived in a
rented house he would move. But he owns
a house and is tied down. He has many
and various kinds of neighbors. Some have
liked Jilscn and some Jilson has liked.
Some have not liked JilsoD, and the de-
parture of some has caused Jilson to dance
for joy.
the red-combed chanticleer, with his clar-
ion notes ringing out on the night air from
8 O'Clock onward, has a distressing effect
upon him. He does not sleep much after
yard spelibinder. He wakes up and Won
ders why Brown keeps that rooster in the
back yard, and while he is wondering the
cock crows AGAR. He tries to sleep, and
Is just dosing slightly when the rooster a
few doors further down the street breaks
in with defiant oock-a -doodle-doo. He Is
answer ed, of course. Then there are crows
and counter crows. Finally the ROSTERS
run the gamut of their voices and are ap-
parently tired out.
Jilson is now thoroughly awake and thor
oughly mad He makes up his mind to
complain about those ROSTERS as soon as
people are up. He is turning this over in
his mind when the rooster belonging to the
colored people in the alley breaks out, then
another and another farther off; but Jison
has so accustomed himself to 1t, and knows
from what direction to expect the different
sounds that he can almost hear ROSTERS
half across the city. The farther away the
rooster, the more defiant he is in voice
Jilson's neghbors' ROSTERS and the far
away ROSTERS seem to have special
grudge against each other because they
are never likely to come in close contact
Jilson plans how he can have the nni-
sance abated. He can locate his neighbors'
rcosteTs, and could make a complaint
against them. but he would only offend
them ard accomplish nothing unless he
could suppress the others. He resolves to
get up IN the morning and locate the roos-
tiers and make one general complaint and
bring the whole rooster-loving multitude
into the Police Court
But how to locate them! His first diff
Guilty IS to find out who owns the colorad
peoples birds. Each dweller in the aIlev
denies that he las any birds None knows
to whom the chickens running around in
the alley belong. Jilson finds 1t next to i'm
possible to locate them Then he finds great
eT difficulty as he goes farther away. The
faraway cocks battle him. He returns from
an early morning prowl only sure that his
neighbors have ROSTERS and aware that IL
he must complain it will be against only a
part of the nuisance.
So Jtlson says nothing. and lies awake
every morning exerting his intellect upon
system of machinery which would reach
In and strangle a rooster as soon as he at
tempts to crow. He fashions strange de-
vices which might be put on the rooster's
neck at night and removed after peonIe
have obtained their morning naps He
thinks how as boy he once heard that If
a COW We're tied head and foot she could
not break through fence, and how he an
pied that to rooster that few out of the
hen yard every day, and how the scheme
succeeded in stopping the rooster from
growing ever after. He used a sltp-noose
ana the rooster soon choked himself to
oeath. Jlson meditates going around and
using similar sip-noose on the ROSTERS
that are disturbing him.
Inen ne wages crusade, in his mind
against the city authorities that will per.
NIT chickens to be kept in the back yards
snc sheds in the city, and become a general
nuisance. Jilson becomes a Heformer He
sees that there can only be a well-regulated
city and the average man have comfort
wren some masterful man-like Jflson, for
hstaf ce-is placed in control who will
with czar-like rule, make people live "a in q
CITY ana not try farming on a small sc.Ia
In ten feet of back yard He would bave
aS commissioner one who would bring IN
all Offenders with short turn and m.Le
the laws of the city respected. But If is
Only an early morning day dream jntar
rupted by the rising bell.