Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1896-04-04

ne stTdNDefry leStiVaI VIII soon be
with US.
Come OFF, saws the March wind to
the high hat.
Buck beer and sprir- fever come
hand in hand.
The baseball player VIII >pon be
showing us whats swat
Barber-"How will you have your
hair cut - Customer | sup
pose
He-What can | do 10 prove my
love for YOU: She-Don't speak
about it any more
The blushing Of the Easter brides
will soon be sending crimson glow
over the town.
Sillicus are as cold as ice
Miss Pert t-"Yes and YOU don't cut
any with me. See -
Jack I'll bet you cigar jess
won't have me- Tom Weller
make 1t cigarette, and I'll 90 YOU
Muggins did you ever attend
box party at the opera?' Buggins-
No; I'm too fond of music"
.Jack-Bess and Harry were part
ners IL every dance last night. jess
Wonder what they had been quarrel
ling about?
Muggins-"Arent you afraid OF
burglars since you lost your dog =
Buggins-"Oh, no. We've got
new baby at our house"
Sillicus Why do you suppose
love is blind - Cynicus-''So that
he may be spared the pain of seeing
the result Of his work in the divorce
Courts"
Manager makes you think
you would make a success on the pro-
fessional stage ?" Ambitious Amateur
ii can go six days without food"
"Yes," said the political orator. II
stand on a gold platform Say, old
man, cut oft a hunk n chunk il down
here" came voice from the crowd
Sillicus about made up my
mind to stop smoking cigarettes
Cynicus Nonsense No man who
smokes cigarettes has any mind TO
make up
Teacher-Now, here is an example
in mental arithmetic. How old would
person he to-day who was born in
1868? Tommy Please. mum. was
it man or woman?
Hills-Are two heads better than
one. as the old saying is? Carrie
Yes, indeed \ person with two
heads is at least sure Of twenty dollars
week at freak show.
Nell "Chollie told me last night he
thought my face would stop an angel
in its flight" Belle-"Don't YOU
think you'd better practice on clock
first, my dear?''
"He stood at the top OF the steps,
she said, in telling about il afterward,
and | mustered up enough courage 10
say. You know this is leap year
"Yes. What them Then he Ieaped,
and haven't seen him since"
MAUD Ethel, am getting awtully
tired of waiting up till after midnight
for that young man to leave" ''Yes,
papa and | think he is getting tirel
of waiting till you are asleep before he
bids me good bye in the hall.
Miss Maui-"They say il changes
the expression of the face to chew gum
a great deal. don't believe it. Do
you?' Her Brother-"No. Its i'm
possible. On the face Of a gum chewer
there isn't any expression to change
"Why," she faltered, did YOU
hasten to lex up the glove | had
dropped ~ Because, he answered,
boldly. Il thought there might he
something in it for me, some time"
And his worst suspicious were sub,
sequently confirmed.
Diana (the bride)-IIow do they
know that we are bride and bride
groom? We have ON our old clothes
and | rubbed my wedding ring in the
ashes to make it look old. Bride
groom-Oh, YES but | knocked over
the ink-stand when | registered
That man" said the cannbal war
rior, "had the most argumentative
nature ever encountered" "Do YOU
mean the ole you Just ate T. '.Ycs
We had Il dispute on certain points
of ethics and the result was had him
for dinner. "Well. that gave YOU
the best Of the controversy" "les,
but he never gives in. He doesn't
agree with me yet
Blobbs Heres n rather clever lit
tie book k-'Don'ts For Club Men "
Slobbs 1t isn't the 'don'ts' that
worry me its the dues
There's man ur in Frankiord
name Blanket and the neighbors say
he is thoroughly wrapped up in him
self.