The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1896-04-12

doureSs general. major or colonei,
cali sergeant or a corporal. and issue
commands ranging all the way from the
trivial orders of the camp to the most
tnriliing military tactics and maneuvers
OF the Held OF battle. The bugler is sup
posed to understand this, but the grim
humor OF the bugle itself is such that.
unless 1t is subjected TO infiexible mar
tial law, Ii will go off, on clarionet
tangent or bag-pipe staccato. and turn
mess cali into a jabberwockan
squawk that would be as likely to bring
out the ambulance as to assemble line
OF sklrmishers or order a charge.
After two years of service as private.
Dusier ana funny man in Company i,
Eleventh Indiana. my fame reached
headquarters. and Gen. r. A. Cameron
commissioned me brigade bugler and
placed me on his staff. One morning
soon after General Cameron issued or
ders for brigade drill, TO take place at
O'CLOCK p. m The troops In the Com
mand We're all 'old soldiers having 'oeen
through Fort Donelson. Shiloh and
y1cksburg-x Our camp was on the prairie
land near New Iberia, La, and, as
usual In long protracted periods of idle
ness, the stock of camp amusements was
exhausted. So 1t. was understood that
this drill was ordered as counter-irri-
tant 10 camp ennui, and i was so de-
ngnted over my recent promotion that
the Generals drill order actually sound
ed humorous to me; but when IL began to
dawn upon me that was to make my
debut as brigade bugler in the presence
OF the boys, mounted on the back OF
woolly gray mule of the camp follower
type, IL struck me all at once that
Whatever of 'humor' there was left in the
situation stood out prominently in the
mules favor. / don't want TO detract
any from the meritorius creations of
Aesop, but 1 declare to you that If ever
a mule laughed over a prospect the
camp follower did then. and as 1
watched his lean, shaggy sides shake
with suppressed mirth 1 confess that /
became panic-stricken, and / told the
boys that l didn't see how l could sus-
tain myself in the double act of manag-
Ing giggling mule and refractory
bugle. The matter preyed upon my mind
till, in sheer desperation, i went to Gen.
Cameron and entreated him TO relieve
me from duty at headquarters and send
me back to the ranks. / explained to
him that l hadn't been on a horses back
since a little boy L rode old Jack
after the cows. and that had never been
on mule in all my life. He pooh-poohed
and tut-tutted, talked encouragingly to
me and told me to meet the crisis like
soldier, and to remember my motto to
blow. nay horn if Il didn't sell a clam,
TIL began TO feel ashamed of my weak
ness. and believe 1 should have sue
sceeded admirably, but on my way back
10 my quarters / met Bob Hoskins the
wagonmaster-and one of the best horse
men that ever cracked 'blacksnake
over span of mule critters in the
whole course. of the rebellion-and 1
sought comfort from him, and got the
same kind of satisfaction that Job got
out of EliphaZ, Bildad & Co.. for he as
sured me that the mule must be a good
saddle animal, since he had been tested
thoroughly in every other capacity and
had come off more than conqueror in
each instance. 1 merely ventured the
comment that a mule 'cn the retired list
didn't appeal to my Judgment of good
saddle animal, and passed on to my
quarters.
There was only one thing left for me
Il was a soldier and must obey orders.
l was glad, however, that the brigade
had preceded us to the parade ground
for when the generals, aids-de-camp and
orderlies, in their irOn-bound clothes,
were in proper form and the order to
Mount was given / went astride of the
woolly mule in elegant style, but L
quickly recovered, and away we galloped
and came to very gratifying and cred
liable halt in front of the waiting
brigade. AS / sat there on my mule, in
my loose zouave trousers, with my back
bumped up ready for treachery, / was
an exemplified prophecy of the modern
female cyclist, boomers and all; but 1
remembered the story OF Baalam's ass,
and judiciously refrained from exercising
my prerogative where there appeared to
be any likelihood of humiliating the
mule. / don't know when the feelings of
any animal ever took that precise form
in my consideration before. The Gen.
erals first order was Attention. This /
attempted to translate into brass from
my perch on the cratic source of my
anxiety, and as the blare of my bugle
ratified and tore along the labyrinths of
his ear he shot backward from under
me, and / finished that cali afoot. 1
got the Attention all right, though, and
was cheered TO the echo. / now deter
mined to resign, sure enough, but Gen.
Livicy talked me out of it again and
gave me a good horse and an additional
commission-brigade postmaster-in rec
ognition of what he called 'salutary serv-
ices and 1 guess he was right for the
boys didn't have the blues any more for
a month"
Go be continued next Sunday.)