davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning times., 1896-06-21

on the necessities of the family
and which makes as much noise as ii brass
band. Besides, the courts have inter,iicted
the piano in fiat life. 1t has been legally
DECIDED a nuisance Complaint anywhere
is simmediately followed by suppression.
The ban 10 and the guitar and the piaintive
ornament the little flat parlor.
The pianoi S for roomier homes and for q
life disassociated win the scramble for
daily bread and butter.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
NOT A p1nEcroRY.
Why Postmen Sometimes Seem Rude
When You Ask Questions.
Neto York Herald.

Neto York Herald.
l stopped a letter carrier in Thirty-axth
street the other morning and inquired the
plumber of the house on the other side of
the street, at which n personal friend OF
mine lived. giving the name and occupa-
ton OF the gentleman about whom the in
quiry was made. l knew lie lived across
the way, in one of 4 certain block, but had
forgotten the particular number, and L
knew the carrier would know by the mail
delivered.
'.Don't you know. sir" said the carrier,
who kne W me by the way. THAT you ask
for that which it is contrary to the rules
of the Postoffice Department to giye:''
mo. l don't,'' 1 blushingiy admitted.
''weu. it is true he said. "The law
recognizes the right OF citizen to n pri-
vate residence. undisturbed, as long as he
has committed no offense that requires
such privacy to be invaded. Now. if should
give your number and street to anybody
who might happen to want il the thing
might cause you some annoyance
WHY, anybody could find that out
through the directory"
They might and they might not. Any
how. the postofrIce is not a directory
And didn't you know" ne added, us
a parting shot as he went away. THAT
you violate the law by stopping Il posrman
The morning times., 1896-06-21
Dropped with "a Dull Thud.

Are you really the gentleman who writes
those funny things for the morning paper?"
asked the ingenious girl.
Il auI." adniittetl the humOrist, with as
much modesty as he could command.
There is one thing would like to know.
What makes yoI pus the name OF some other
paper after thevery funniest ones?'' '-Cincin-
natl Enquirer.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
why He FiaxSea3she Express.

Engineer tto native Sxho has Tagged the
Alabama express )-wsa are you waving
your shirt fofs Is there a washout ahead?
Native--No. boss, no twashout, tank de
Lawd. l on'y wanted toe borrcr n live
coal outen yo' engine toe light nah
pipe wiv.-Judge.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
The New Bride

TO be sure, exclaimed the otherwoman,
with anima ton, Il invariably insist upon
kissing the minister. / think ii briGe's
privilege. Offended? Bless you, no. l be-
lieve they expect to be Kissed
The process of the orystallization of Gus
tom operated quite as powerfully for the
of the sex as otherwise
Detroit Tribune. ar
The morning times., 1896-06-21
A Awful MiStu he.

Palette-There you are, sir I've painted
you a full line OF your ancestors, and I'll
warrant you that no one will know that
they are not genuine. This is your father,
this your great grandfather, and"
Mr.. NewrIch-Hold on! Good heavens,
man! You've made my great-grandfather
a much younger looking man than am
Pick Me Up.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
Willing to Take Advice.

Man with awful toothache meets a friend
and tells him his woes.
The Friend-Ah, l had Just as bad
toothache as you yesterday, and l went
home and my wife pitied me and kissed
me ana made so much of me thas the tooth.
ache disappeared YoI take my tip"
The Achyne-Is your wife at home dc
you thinS?-Woousocket Reporter.
The morning times., 1896-06-21

ricss.shz, the snxiou httie cock gathers
together all his coss eIEtne condiments and
stands, pot in hand sunt3l he is out OF sight,
when he paisbsck his utensils with regret
fui sighs. But.if rertkaace, he stops for
a moment. without. however, the remotest
intention of breaking hFead with US, the
pot is on the range andrsimme ring before
his summons TO the bungalow bell has
been answered. Jp
The morning times., 1896-06-21
The War of the Future.

How many seamstresses have we in the
army?'' asked the generaless.
Now. what do you want to know that
for?" asked the aid-de-camp, who bad been
a hired girl and still retained her lack of
respect for authority.
why, read somewhere that Napoleon
often won his battles by femmin 6 theenemy
in."-Indianapolis Journal.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
Vague.

He--so your uncle was all through the
war?
She-Yes; and he was in no less than
twenty pitched battles.
He-You are sure it was not pitched
camps?
she-weIl. perhaps it was. know there
was pitch in it.-Beston Transcript.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
Married.

Bobby (reading fairy taie)-Mny, here it
says, the prince and the princess kept
up brilliant fire OF repartee." What
does it mean?
May with q long-drawn sfgh)-Oh, that
means that they were married and firing
the tea set at each other, T s'pose. Judge.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
A ReasonahIe Reuuest.

Assistant Inquisitor-That hereto whose
ears We filled with melted lead yesterday
has brought around proof that he is inno-
cent.
Chief IDGuisitor-Well, what does he want
DOw-that we shouldgive him anew hearing?
Indianapolis Journal.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
They Never Do.

Hc-I'vc noticed one thing about widows
weeds.
She-What is it?
He-They yseldomiDterfere with the growth
of orange blossome on the same soil.-St.
Louis Globe-Democrat.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
A Dead Shot.

Brown is good shot, isn't he?"
VERY good We were practicing with our
guns at my cnuntry place the other day and
he hit the bulls eye the first time
8 Very clever"
?. ''Yes; but he had to pay for the bull
Harper's Weekly.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
It NarieS.
at is n moon hour,,r

Papa, what is a noon hour'?'
.'well. son. at our bank it is from IL
until 80 for the clerks. but the Officers
generally get from 11:30 to 3-"-Louis-
vile Courier Journal.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
EVILS OF POSTAGE STAMP HABIT.
Though Apparently Harmless, It Has
Led To Murder In Erunee.

Led 10 Murder In France.
Binghanaton Republican.
One of the queerest ecoentrieities of TIE
human intellect is that which takes the
form of collecting postage stamps. Some
people are una BILE to understand whatpcs-
sibIe satisfaction there can te in the owner
ship of, say, a Theoretically completc collec-
tion ofpnstage stamps, or one ewhichincludes
a specimen of every kind OF stamp ever is
suedby any ycountry. race, tribe, community.
Some people do. however, enjoy collecting
and exchanging the, sticky things and pro-
fess to find mental peace and recreationin
the contemplation OF particularly rare or
ugly specimen.
The habit has always been supposed 20
be quite harmless. and, from one point of
view, a habit rather to be encouraged, as
The morning times., 1896-06-21
Customary

she-How nervous you were when you
proposed.
He-Yes. I'm always that way when
I'm getting engaged.-Indianapoi Journal.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
Returns.

She Did you make anything in that
trade with Bacon? 80
He-I should say I did, 1 made a life
long enemy.-Yonkers Statesman.
The morning times., 1896-06-21
COmpennation

Fair Diner-I must say, waiter, that
the meats in this restaurant are very
badly cooked and tough.
Waitcr-I'm very sorry, miss, that We
'avcn't given satisfactioh; bBt you must
haqmis that We keep the sharpest knives
In nLondon.-Sketoas
The morning times., 1896-06-21

in this way while he is delivering bis
mail?"
No. didu't-and for that reason this
M RI prauh
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08

The Atlantic, denounce President Cleye-
lands message and the Monroe doctrine.
The preacher, who IS an exceptional man
N ever way, wisely declined and ex-
pressed only neatral opinions The pa
pers are full of the subject, all Of them
freely quoting from the American press
and Journals on the continent.
The tariff question is agitated to ye-
~ high degree. Not long ago I atten-
ded a conference Of the s.National anti
Free Import League at which the ques-
ton was thoroughly discussed. They
cannot conceive Of the American Demo
cratic free trader as being anything but
a ID hypocrlte. England is certainly
suffering from her free trade policy and
change in the near future is inevitable.
Her experience ought to bea lesson to
the world-that free trade is an absolute
failure unless qualified by reciprocity.
Il
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08
A Letter from G. G.. krook.


On Monday Mr.. Lind received an in
teresting letter from G. G.. Krook who
is now studying law at London. In
part. he says: The attorneys to whom L
was referred by Mr.. .Pillsbury rendered
me Invaluable service by way of advice
and letters of introduction. tried very
hard to work out my plan as to secur-
ing employment in an attorneys office,
but encountered obstacles that brought
me to halt. In the first place labor is
so cheap that my earnings would not by
far meet my expenses; the difficulty of
even securing place on account of my
limited stay. And again, If I should
perchance succeed in getting favorable
position, but little time would be given
me for reading. But the greatest of
hindrances was my love of freedom and
independence was too much of an
American to want to place myself under
any obligations to an Engllshman; and
much do enjoy the exercise of this feel
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08
27,953.2O
One Honest Farmer.

The St. Paul Globe contains the fol-
lowing: That there is at least one strict
ly honest man in the state of Minnesota
was proven last week by the following
letter, which was received by State Au-
ditor Dunn from Martin Bowman Of
Bashaw, Brown County.
Dear Sir: Martin Bowman, the payee
in attached warrant, desires us to state
that after resurvey of his grove he finds
that mistake OF about half an acre was
made in the measurement of the same;
that it is only one and half acres. He
also states that during the dry season
last fall and summer number of trees
died. He feels that under the circum-
stances he would rather not accept any
bounty and hereby directs you to return
the warrant into the State treasury and
cancel his clam and order to the same.
Some little time ago a warrant for
$3.50 was sent to Bowman from the
State auditors Office IN payment of a
tree bounty to which he was entitled un-
der the law, and it was in response to
this that the above letter was written.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08
Teachers Meeting.

The next meeting of the Teachers
Reading Circle for the eastern portion
of the county will be held at New Ulm
in the Union School, on January II, be:
ginning at 2 p. m. This date has been
fixed to insure the attendance of all
teachers that may now be away on va
cation tours.
Among other features of the program
there will be another discussion on
school matters, using Whites School
Management to page so for the text
The author processes to have written the
book for teachers of country schools. in
particular. and the work must prove ex.
tre1nely helpful. The following topics
will be discussed:
l. What supreme lesson lies in the
teaching experience of Pestalozzi? Mis-
conduct is to be considered an offense
against what2
2. Habit in pupils. how formed
how affecting the disci pline of the
school-in this connection what de-
mands are made on the teachers temper
and power Of self control?
8. Use of good eyes and ears in teach.
er-absent mindedness-power of con.
troll in the eye.
4. Common sense defned-as fac
tor in discipline-what it links with
tact defined. Common mistakes IN at
tributing motives for misconduct and
failings of children.
5. The authors requirementsrespe
ing teachers character-respecting his
disposition and manner respecting his
habits.
6. Extent of teachers authority, joint
and exclusive conflicts on this ques.
ton. Under this head what does the
teacher stand in need Of?
7. Attractive surroundings, related tc
easy control-neatness in work.
s. Plans for ventilation-by stove
by fre-place-by windows. Ill.,
9. Details of proper lighting. How
do pure air and proper light affect orde]
and why? ~~' ...>z.#
10. Properly adjusted seats ane
desks. s.'
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08

tending the classes and lectures in the
Inns of Court School of Law. This in
stitution embraces four Inns of Court
Lincoln's Inn, Grays' Inn,' Inner Temple
and Middle Temple still retains
many of its ancient peculiaritles, such as
complicated conditions for admission and
the eating of certain number of dinners
as prerequisite to a calling to the bar.
The lectures and classes are conducted
under the auspices of ''council of le-
gal education," the members of which
are chosen from the various Inns of
Court. The educational year consists
Of four terms and each term is held in
one of the Inns. have entered as a
non-member and my years tuition only
amounts to $21. am we'll pleased with
the work carried on, for the subjects of
Roman law, Constitutional law and his
tory and Legal history present beauti-
full and interesting view of the whole
system of Jurisprudence from the time
Of the early Romans and Hindoos to the
present day. I feel that my plan will
operate to my benefit and that I shall
not regret the time spend here:
My trip over was very enjoyable one,
especially the ocean voyage. London I
like, but for it's historical interest and
peculiarities only. The people are ex-
tremely kind, but the kindness is not so
frank and unconditional as that prac-
ticed by Americans. The Englishman
is apparently friendly and polite, but his
generosity extends only so far as his per-
sonal interest is concerned and beyond
that he is hampered by his unchecked
selfshness.
As to political matters, the questions
concerning Venezuela, the Armenians,
Protection and Free Trade and Agricul-
ture are the most important. The Vene-
zuelan issue is at this moment exciting
q great deal Of commotion in nearly all
organized bodies, even the church. Last
Thursday I attended services in one Of
the most prominent churches and at the
close Of his sermon tho minister, Dr..
Parker, announced the receipt Of . tele-
gram from the headquarterss Of . church
council, asking him 70 publicly and in
Iunion With tho church on both sides Of
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08

menslons were II by 16 and its total
cost only fifty dollars, fabulous sum,
however, in those days.
The next building was erected on the
site of the present magnificent structure
and was used until the jail building was
erected. The latter has been used for a
good many years and if its walls could
talk they could tell many an interesting
story by judge and lawyer and recall ex-
citing cases without end. But it's part
of past history now, and it's a question
whether the new room, with everything
in apple-pie order, will carry with it the
good times that the old one used to.
Look at it-how little it now appears!
But it's never gone back on us for
nineteen or twenty years;
An we won't go back on it now,
or go to pokin' fun.
There's such thing as ipraisln' thing
for the good that it has done.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08
Wit and Humor.

Leslie's Weekly: Denslow had invited
a party of friends to home. poker
symposium, and Mrs. Denslow brings in
the luncheon just as Denslow gets his
first hand in two hours. sWhy, Tommy,
isn't it rather unusual to have every card
IN your hand clubs2" 4: @:
New York Weekly business man Tin
the bosom Of his family The crops of
this country are ABUNDANT, those of
Europe have failed and the stream of
gold which has been flowing across the
Atlantic will soon be returning. You
bet I'll get my share Of it,
Daughter That's just splendid. Then
next year We can all 60 to Europe to
spend it.
Chicago Record Broncho Bill Yes.
he's got : sore t'roat. Dc rope broke.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08
PoST0FFICE STATEMENT,
A Report Of the Business Of the New Ulm
f. Office in 1895.

n - r. glE =
The following facts have kindly been
furnished by Postmaster Brust. Six
hundred and ninety six registered pieces
OF mail were received and delivered and
five hundred and thirteen dispatched
from the local office. .-.z; - -: 81. S.
The number of special delivery letters:
delivered was 1O5. I ...- e:
The local newspapers mailed 1S,184
pounds or over nine tons of printed mat
ter during the year.
The receipts in the postal business
wers as follows:
Stamps, envelopes, cards, etc. $4,s76.sa
Box Rent $500.
Total ..- $5,4O4.92
The disbursements are also given here
with: il ~'
Expense of running office $2,129.z3:
Net income to U. S. 3,s75.19.
Total 5,4O492
The receipts of the Money Order Bus
mess were..
Cash on hand, Jay. 1, 1895 2OS.23
Domestic Orders issued, 1908 26,O78.66
Fees on same 232.55
International orders, 176 1,339.O6
Fees on same 22.7O
Total 27,953.2O
The disbursements in the. money Or
der transactions we're:
Domestic orders paid, 1889 $12,O91.27
International paid, "a s,313.55
Domestic orders repaid, 16 12O.6O
International repaid, 1000
Deposited at Markato 100000
Cash on hand, Dec. 81, 1895, 367.7S
Total 27,953.20
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08
Science and War.

, T =
Thomas A. Edison has a good many
interesting ideas. One of his latest is
for the defense of New York harbor by
lining the bottom of the sea for Is miles
out with network of electric cables on
which could be strung at intervals dead
" torpedoes which could be discharged
into the bottom Of hostile ships. Ships
coming to the attack of New York would
be certain to pass over some Of the cab
les, and by means Of range-fnder To-
Gated at an observatory on the shore
the proper moment could be determined
for discharg,ne any Of the torpedoes BY
means Of an electric connect ction. Thus
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08
THE NEW COURT HOUSE.
TIE NEW COURT HOUSE.
Out Of the Old House, Judge Moved up
into the New;
All the hurry and worry is i just as good
as through.
Only a bounden duty remains for you
and I. =s 4
And that's to stand onsthe doorstep, and
bid the old house goodbye. Il

What shell we've lived in. these nine
teen or twenty year! IS
Wonder it hadn't smashed in, and tum-
bled. about our ears; .r5
Wonder It's stuck together, and an
sWered till today; : :@z4 s.s
But every individual log was put up
AS court opened in the fine new build
ing yesterday morning the writer. could
not help but fall into reminiscent mood
and have the above lines from Carleton n
fitting before his memory.
y The room is such an elegant one, SO
large and yet CHEEKY, and is SO richly
furnished, that the contrast with the old
shell in which csurt has been held for
twenty years or more is ever present
and striking. 45 s-
Within the railing, surrounding the
Judges bench, are the jury boxes, wit
ness stand, clerk and reporters tables
and lawyers desks. All are Of antique
oak and the effect upon the eye is pleas
ing. Outside ofthe railing are $40 COM
Portable opera chairs for the, accomoda-
tion of visitors.
To the right of the court room are the
jury rooms. consultation quarters aud
reporters Office; to the left, the Judges
Office and main entrance.
The judge overlooks all from COM
manding position at the south end of the
building.
The change is so great from what we
have been accustomed to that it natural
ly sends us back in recollection to the
buildings from which justice was meted
out in these parts in the early days.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08
o.. NEW NNN. WEDNESDAY, JAMS = -lsa
the whole British navy could be blown
out of the water and DESTROYED without


the whole British navy could be blown
out of the water and destroyed without
the loss Of a man on our side. All other
coast. cities could be defended in the
same way at an expense insig gnifcant,
sMr. Edison claims, when compared with.
the cost of building battle ships.
6 Another of the great inventors ideas
is the possibility of defending fort by
means Of streams Of electricity charged
water. These streams could be played
upon an advancing enemy through hose,
and he claims that 25 men armed with
such a lose, could successfully defend a
fort against 10000 or any number cf
men. The whole advancing line could
I be drenched with water and prostrated.
The water isa good conductor of cleo
.tricity. The moment the stream would
strike any part Of the body, even the
smallest exposed. portion of the face, the
body would complete the circuit and the
man would fall as one who accidently
touches "a live" wire. ..7A I'D
i If Mr.. Edison's schemes are feasible,
they show, how science can be made to
etfecta complete abolition of war be-
tween civilized communities. The at
tacking party would simply court his
own destruction if the defenders were
scientifically prepared for business
Minneapolis Tribune.
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08

The first court
house. appears
from the accom-
pany cut, was
built of logs by
August He'll
mann and wos
located under Il
group of oak
trees where now
stands the resi-
dences of M.
Mullen and John
Bellm. Its de-
New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1896-01-08

ing now, consi-
'dering the pres
state of affairs
between the two
countries. In
consequence of
these difficulties
I finally conclu-
ded to devote the
, whole of my time
to some institu-.
ton of legal ed
ucation,and soon
found mvself at.