The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1896-10-04

THE AMERICAN WAY.
1t WOULD be dif1cult to imagine a sharper
contrast than that between the policy Just
described and the French custom defended
in the following narration from the pen of
Nine De Liguerolles:
On leaving the convent, irreverently
called Les Oiseaux," where 1 had spent
a year, / was sent to England in order TO
complete my education and to perfect my
knowledge of your tongue, which l had
already known fairly well. My father in
sisted on this. as he is a phiIologist, and
he wanted me to aid him in his literary
work. On returning to Paris, 1 spent a
year in our chateau near town, and met
there several elderly men whom my father
and mother regarded as eligible parts.
also met a young officer, with whom l
fell rnadly, desperately in love. He was
from the cavalry barracks at Versailles,
and ] knew his sister. They were poor,
noticing that l was in love with the
Dragon, said:
must not compromise yourself by speaking
to him any more
This was the maternal order. and I had
to obey. My father then took me into
Paris. and 1 was informed that 1 was to
be married within six weeks time.
thought it horrible, and was more Mortified
still when 1 was told that my sutton was
NJ. -, an elderly manufacturer, who
used to pay special attention to me, but
~ 49, "~~
rough, unlettered, and seemed almost re-
pulsive. He could not waltz like the
hobereau. or country squire, who often
came to see us. He was as awkward as 81
oeafc clls la mal | ,e oifeh ca He KNEW n,m sn noth hing
about music, and was never able to turn
over my Wagner books while l was at
the piaro-a movement in which the adora~
bly-moustachioed dragon excelled. he
abominated all my novelists and poets,
Jumping Paul Bourget, Marcel Provost,
and the "Chef 6eS OOeJrS SlaVeS. ore of
our best society poets, Nj. De M~ontesquiou-
Pezenzac; an togesher as sl4y scripo Idols
of his own mandatory.
Well, sir, I had to marry that man, my
parents arranging the engagement and the
wedding in the usual legal and social man
ner. What is the consequence? l am a
children, today. Ny husband is rich and
powerful and surrounds me with every
luxury: My children, on whom dote, will
be well provided for. Had / married the
officer it would be otherwise. and / feel
and see clearly that this would have been
the case, for his pay and my dowry would
not have been sufficient for thorough lam
lily comfort. / see him sometimes, and
without a pang. He is growing gray and
stout, and L am by no means an attenu-
eted matro1 My husband is g~rowingAyery
old, too, but he is as tough as Lii Hung
Thus, by the wise, conventional action OF
my parents, who engaged me and married
me-, L am leading a life devoid of care of
THE GERMAN PLAN.
And then there is the German plan, very
solemn and imposing, as the following de-
scription shows:
There is a great deal of ceremony and
fuss connected with a German betrothal,
and a man is called upon to study and re-
fleet over his preliminary duties as a
Brautigam toward his bride. After getting
the consent of the young lady and her par
ents or guardians the matter is not set
t7ad hr ciro- II cIipnioy on ON on oro ont riny
over her finger. Both sides first exchange
engagement rings, which may either be
their future wedding rings or others with
precious stones of various kinds. In each
ring. instead of a posey, is engraved the
pame of the donor and the date of the be-
trothal. Then a notice of betrothal is
drawn up and sent to the public papers
kind: The parents have the honor most
hurnbly to announce the betrothal of our
Herr So-and-So and his wife Anna, nee
So-and-So,' with the addition of the pro-
fessional titles IN fuii OF the persons con
groom announces his engagement. and also
adds his own professional rank and titles
and those of his future father-in-law and
any particular of family interest connected
with his future mother-in-law.
Prlnded 2oaees are then aispatened IN
all the relatives and friends, far and near;
then, but not till then, the engaged couple
may dilo oo LII apOob dioliC
and arm in arm. They have, within the
next few weeks. to call together on all
of the business is that they have to accept
innumerable invitations to dinners or sup
pers from their kind friends, where. as
place of honor at table, when their health
is invariably proposed in a gushing and
other speeches and toasts to every mem
Der of both sides of the family. All this
attaches an immense amount of formality
TO "A. hetrOtlal: and whenever the DllRhtAd
couple meet anywhere they are, of course,
told off to one another, and people seldom
seem to expect them to contribute any
thing toward the general entertainment,
they being privileged to devote themselves
whatever corner they like. To break off
an engagement ushered In with SO much
pond ! snc,a ee neinf y I Is NO T Hasy il m nn t
an action in Germany, however, for breach
of promise; and even the trainers of the
new Code of Civil Law, that will shortly
come in force for the whole of the Ger
man empire, refused to entertain the sub
ject for very Ineligible reasons.
1t is worthy of remark that throughout
the correspondence there is a much more
liberal tolerance of free, unembarrassed
and young women than has ever before
been manifested in a discussion.of the sub
ject in England.
MEN HER FRIENDS.
Mrs. B~erringer pays this tribute to Amer,
lean custom as compared with English re-
strictions:
An American girl is not brought up to
consider that the fact of a man showing
pleasure in her society and seeking it be-
tokens a warmer interest, unless he spe-
cially declares himself. The privileges of
| escort and companionship granted to Amer
lean men, free from the restraining pres
ence of a "gooseberry," are sacred in their
eyes. A definite, if unwritten, code OBJ
tains. Any infringement cf it's laws would
ha bitterly resented and mprci1pSG1V NM
ished by the public voice. A young girl
placed under the care of an American man
is as safe as in tt custody of her brother.
Although the watchful parental eye and
the suspicious glare of the maiden aunt
fall not upon him, she is a sacred trust,
to be shielded from, not betrayed into,
harm.
In this tramme intercourse ian
American girl is permitted as many mas
culine friends as she pleases) maid and
man alike grow to know each others
worlds, themselves, and each other. Ii love
is born to them he is conceived of mutual
sympathy and comprehension, and fed on
the perfect knowledge which casteth out
all fear. If his torch remains smouldering