Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1896-02-06

He vowed that his love would be change
less and true,
Surviving mans oft-shf.ing hnmors;
Yet in spite of his protests she lost him;
he flew
On the day that he saw her in sloomers.
Washington Star.
Miss Elderly-She said she heard
was engaged. Lena-How nice OF her!
Truth. ~.
Maude-Did you 20 TO Claras weds
ding? Mabel-No; l never encourage
Dotteries.-Yonkers Statesman.
do You Let your wife have her own
wayT "Oh, yes; it's only when she
wants to have mine that object
Harpers Bazaar.
Which do you psefer-fact or Nc
tion?" "Oh, the former, by all means
Fiction nowadays Is much too matter
Of fact."-Judge.
! Miss Ethel wonder if the gentle
man over there can hear me when I
sing? Maid-Of course he can; he is
| Fur Allie ssps
Estella-A lover ID much more devot-
ed than husband. MurillD-Yes, in
deed; and, besides, one can have
whole lot of lovers at once.-Chicago
Record.
Mrs. Newed-Is your husband do
nestle man? Mrs. Henpeck-He's the
only domestic we keep, l have taught
him to cook and wash dishes very nice
ly.-Philadelphia Record.
The love of money is the root of all
evil" quoted Mrs. Lamb. mo-" re-
piled Mr.. Lamb, who had been. ishorn
lately, "Wall street Is the route Of all
evil."-Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
Cholly-Yaas, twied to play golf last
summer, but l gave it up when ! was
hit on the head and knocked silly.
Maud-Indeed, that's too bad, and can
the doctor do nothing for you?--Truth.
| Mrs. ChatterboX-Do you ever make
any errors in speech? Mrs. Words
WORTHLESS; / made one a few years
ago. Mrs. Chatterbox- What was it?
Mrs. Wordsworth said "Yes."-Rich-
mond State.
Helm afraid ! couldn't make you
happy, darling, on $4,000 year. She
Oh, it's plenty. With economy ! can
dress on $1,000, and just think, dear.
we can have all the rest for household
| expenses!-Life.
Small Brother-Marie, does your adj
mirer stutter? Marie-No, OF course
not! What made you think Of such a
thing? Small Brother-Then why does
he write my dear, dear Marie?"-
Fliegende Blaetter.
Ferguson-I don't like to see full
grown man like you carrying a pair
Of skates along the streets down town
HankinsOn-You'd rather see me carry
Ing them than having them on, wouldn't
youSChicago Tribune.
Lawyer-You say the prisoner stole
your watch. What distinguishing fea-
| ture was there about the watch? Wit
ness-It had my sweetheart's picture
in it. Lawyer-Ah! see. A woman In
the case.-Scottish American.
Old Lady-Can you saw wood? Roll
ingstone Nomoss-Pardon me, madam,
but you are slightly at fault In your
lenses. If you mean, can see wood.
l may say that my eyesight is slightly
Observation-Disclosures Record.
Cashier-Have you heard, sir, that
John Jones is a bankrupt? Banker
Well, that's good news. Wen now get
| a little of what he owes us, whereas,
| If he had remained in business. we'd
| never have had a cent.-Fliegcnde
| Blaetter.
First Young LawyerZI don't see how
you happened to lose your case. The
law was plainly on your side. Second
Young Lawyer-Yes, knew t was,
and that was what depended on. But
/ forgot all about the jnry.-Somerville
Journal.
"That was a very fine speech YOU
made the other night" said one Pitts
| burger to another. II didn't make 1t
the other night" replied the other. Il
delivered 1t the other night, but 1t took
me a month to make it."-Pittsburg
Chronicle-Telegraph.
Lady "a widow)-Do you know my
daughter is quite smitten with YOU.
Herr Muller? Gentleman (eeling fat
tered)-Really, now? Lady-A fact:
she was only saying to-day: 4 should
like that gentleman for my papa
Deutscher Soldatenhort.
"Why did you break Off your engage
ment with Miss Bertha?' Because
her parrot was always saying, Stop
that, George" but what difference
did that make? Your engagement was
not q secret 'sBut my name - act
George. Blaetter.
WHO is that new cashier? He does
not look very trustworthy" II be-
tieve he is very near relative OF the
president "veryQnear An, indeed!
Well, the president better have a cafe
that his cashier does nek become a. dis-
tant relativeg'-Fliegende Blaetter.s
simmons-wbAt is the matter with
you? You look as IL some one had
made you angry. Timmins--S Some oae
has. / asked the editor of the Bugle
what he really thought of my poetry.
and he told me that IL there were such
place as the laureatcship In this coun-
try, would be sure to get it.--InLian-
apolis Journal.
Enough for Once.
Among a lot of Fresh-Air Fund chill
dren sent to the sea side last summer