The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1896-03-11
ALI Sorts Of Paragraphs.
- London has 1880 miles of streets.
Paris has 600 miles of streets.

owe for me-" 7.Well," he faltered,
but calmly, IT have offered to marry
you"
= Old Mr.. F~ussy-asMatilda, has
that young man gone yet Els
iaughter-"Why, yes, papa Z Old
Mr.. Fussy-"H'm, you were SO still
that I thought he was stillthere!
- queer wit was a London liquor
dealer who bequeathed his gin-mill to
the town on condition that forty shill
Of the rent should be paid each
year to a preacher to preach sermon
on drunkenness.
= Perry Patettic (n the road
Wy don't you so in2 De dogs ali
Don't YOU see him Vaughn his
Wayworn Watson atthe gatef-
an he's growlin' at the same
time. l don't know which endao
lieve.
Johnny he whispered TO her
little brother, "did your sister get d.
note from me last night2 Il vas writ.
ten on pink paper. 81 think she
must have got it, said Johnny,
g 'cause when she came down to break
fast this morning her hair was done up
in pink curl-papers."
= A lady in Americus, GA; is US
ing a lamp chimney she has had and
used daily for the past eight years,
and she expects to use it for many
years yet. She says that she boiled
it in salt water when it was bought In
1882, and no matter how large 8 fame
runs through it, it won't break.
- An Irishmau and a Frenchman
were one day having a dispute over,
the nationality Of a friend Of theirs.
1T say,r said the Frenchman, that
if he was born in France lie is a
Frencbman.'' "Begorra," said Pat,
eff a cat should have kittensi in the
oven would you call them biscuits
"Mamma, I know the gentle
mans name that called TO see Aunt
Ellie last night, and nobody told me,
either" "Well, then, what is ii,
Bobby 2" "Why, George Don't
heard her say George Don't in the par-
lor four or five times hand-runnJng-
That's what his name is"
- An Englishman was Boosting to
a Yankee that they had a book in the
British museum which was once own
ed by Cicero. Cob, that amt Moth
in'," reported the Yankee in the
museum in Bosting they've got the
lead-pencil that Noah used to check
off the animals that went into the
ark"
The government engineering charge
of the department Of road inquiry
General Roy Stone. says there are
ebout 500, 600, O0O tons Of freight;
hauled over roads every year insthe5s
United States, and 60 per cent. Of the
cost Of doing it is due to bad roads,
He believes the loss from poor roads
in this country would aggregate no
less than 1923, O00, 600 annually.
- Alllast winter Mr.. Geo. a. Mills,
of Lebanon, Conn.,, was badly afflicted
with rheumatism. At times it was so
severe that he could not stand up
straight, but was drawn over on one
side. II trieds different remedies
without receiving relief, he says
"until about six months ago / bought
a bottle of Chamberlain Pain Balm.
After using it for three days my rheu.9
matism was gone and has not returned
since. For sale by Hill Bros.
= The failure Of the Florida orange.
crop has caused many remote countries
to be drawn upon to make good the
shortage. Oranges from the Holy
Land have recently been offered for
sale in Chicago. The fruit is light
colored, oval and carefully packed.
1t was grown neal Jerusalem, and was
in excellent condition when received
in this country.
= In recalling some instances Of
his childhood, Lord Macauley once
said: "When a boy, I began to read.
very earnestly, but at thefootof every
page I stopped, and obliged myself
give an account Of what | had read on
that page. At first I had to read it
three or four times before I got Eln
mind firmly fixed; but now, afterI
have read a book through once, I can
almost recite it from beginning to-
end"
"A Methodist paper says that
three brothers who were preachers
made a visit to their mother. One Of
them said, "Do you not think, mother,
that you ruled with two rigid robin;
our boyhood? It would have been
better I think had you used gentler
methods" The old lady rose to her
full height and replied, "Well, vii
liam, when you have raised up thres
as good preachers as 1 have, then you
can talk" &
- A Ratchet was found a few days
ago completely imbedded in the trunk
of a tree cut down in C~heboygan Co.,
Michigan. The wood had grown over;
it so that it was invisible from the
outside. It bore the name of Robert
La Sale, the French explorer, the
date 1865, and the Latin inscription,
cad Majorem Deaf Gloriam," the
motto of the Jesuit order to which
La Sale belonged.
= Simon S. Hartman, of Tunnelton,
West Va, has been SUBJ ct to attacks
of collie about once a ye.., and would
have to call a doctor and then suffer
for about twelve hours as much as
some do when they die. He was taken
recently just the same as at other
times, and concluded to try Chamber
lain's Collie, Cholera and Diarrhea
Remedy. He says: 81 took one dose
of it and it gave me relief in FIVE min
utes. That is more than any thing
else has ever done for me-" For, sale
by Hill Bros.
= Converse College has lately re-
ceived donations amounting to over
100000. Mr.. D. E. Converse heads
the list with a gift Of $4,000, the
Board of Directors, the citizens Of
.Spartanburg and other friends Of the
College give over $50, GOO. The gifts
to the college are in perpetuity and
the management Of the college is
- 80