The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1896-02-26
THE TALL SILK HAT.
1T COSTS A SMALL FORTUNE FOR A
FELLOW TO DRESS UP TO CNE.

A Few Notes on This Deadly Head Cover
ing In General, with n Word About
Judge Crabtrce's First One In Particular.
An Experience on the Newburg Boat.
"You look sad, observed Major Dodge
to his partner as the latter straycd into the
office.
II am always sad after dropping In at
the hattcrs to have my hat ironed," an
wercd Judge Crabtrco. There are sad
scenes enacted in any place where silk hats
are sold. "
"Still," said the major, IL have stood
among these hcartrending scenes, the floor
all sloppy with the tears of the wretches
about me, and been comparatively un-
moved"
You may make light of this thing II
you want to, " returned the judge, but l
insist that there is to me something inf
Ditely saddening in seeing n young man
buying his first silk hat with smile on
his face and the proud fires of youthful
buoyancy burning in his eye. He knows
not what he docs--that he is forging the
first link in chain which he can never
rend asunder; that he is forming habit
Little does he realize that silk hats cost IS
apiece, and that the shape changes twice q
| year. l just saw Snickett that young
clerk in the Office of Billydick, Puffer,
Popkins & Smith, take the first downward
step. Poor fellow, he doesn't know that
he will soon be paying 800 for u suit Of
clothes in his effort TO dress up to his silk
hat"
Il well remember" went on Judge
Crabtree, how l myself first forsook the
narrow way of the low hat and entered
| into the broad and easy plaisance of the
silk hat. Little did l know that the shape
changes twice II year, with an occasional
extra, like nm evening paper, If the matters
get hard up. went into the gilded silk
hat palace and said carelessly TO the clerk,
Silk, please, ~, and'-
"Your head must have been bigger then
than it is now"
at was. This happened the next day
after l won my first case. Seven and FIVE
I eighths l say, and 1t was snug fit. /
went out, family catching the stealthy
footballs of the Goddess of Fame close be-
hird me.
II was at this time passionately inter
ested in a young woman who afterward
married a druggist, walking scoundrel
who wore fur cap. had asked her to
, take water excursion with me, and she
had consented. The next morning we
boarded an Albany day boat for Newburg,
our intention being to come back on the
boat we should meet there My heart was
light for the sinister shadow of that un.
hanged apothecary had not yet fallen across
my pathway l talked gayly and leaned
against the rail of the boat with an easy,
graceful air. was modestly illustrating
to the fair one the scene wherein had as
tonished the judge and caused the jury t.
sit in open mouthed wonder when my new
hat tumbled off my head into the water.
looked over the edge and saw 1t pass un
der the port paddle wheel like cham
payne cork beneath a tidal wave. tied
pocket handkerchief over my head and sal
down on q low stool beside the girl ant
talked about the interest felt in prison
reform.
THE corners of the handkerchief flut
tered about in the wind, and an 1S-month
old baby which woman was holding IL
her lap near by called 'DranmaP every tim
he caught sight of me. A deckhand cam
and sympathized with me and offered Il
4 lend me the hat Of n man who the day be
e fore had reversed my experience, havinI
: left his hat ON board and gone under tn
port paddle wheel himself, but l declines
, it. Newburg had moved up the river al
10 most to Albany that day, but we caugh
up with it at last. As we disembarked tn
deckhand came running to me with m
hat on the end of boat hook. He explain
I'd that it had been caught in the paddl
wheel and had floated out when the steam
Or stopped took it, shook small ifs
out of it, and we walked on to the othe
boat.
1.-The hat was not in good condivio.-' ,
~ rru---,~.,ah-h battered with the pounding
ID worn off entirely, as If the hat Was MY
'e ing IL occurred to me that it needed ,
DC gone over with currycomb lilo
Oh horse But my handkerchief had becon
unbearable, SO / battered the hat in,
shape with brick, brushed 1t with
broom which borrowed from the flrema
ana put 1t on. 1t fitted easier, since MUG
or the cloth raPo-, leather, Durlap, limo
ieum and other ingredients had come oul
felt that presented the appearance of
passenger who had drowned himself
week before and had now repented an
II come back on board to finish his Journey
We went up on the upper deck between
the smokestacks, where the hat would dr.
!: rapidly, and talked of the necessity @
= extending outdoor relief in the slums. New
iork retreated rapidly, but we caught
0 by hard steaming. / thought felt an ee
wriggling in the hat once, but 1t was onl,
a piece of gimp which had fallen down.
heard passenger refer to me as the sub
marine wonder and another explaining
that was n nineteenth century mermaI
thrown up by the paddle wheels. enviet
the thoughtful tourist who had gone undel
the port wheel and left his hat to battl,
| a m nd
and went home in cab, the driver look
ing at my hat and collecting his fare IL
advance. We dropped the young lady al
ner home, and at my door gave the hal
TO the driver. Up to three or four year,
ago he was still wearing it, carefully put.
ting rubber coop over it when 1t rained
so that 1t shouldn't get wet. l bought q
new hat, but was really nothing out by
he mishap, as found that the shape had
ahanged while l was up the river, and !
should have had to get new one anyhow
10. .a-1-=-