The record-union., 1896-04-19
A PROBLEM IN DIVISION.
Few Persons Are Able to Give a Correct
Answer 0f-Hand.
How Much Would You Expect If All
the Money in the Land Were
Divided Equally?

divided equally?
How would you spend it if you sud
denly found yourself with the same
financial resources as the members of
TIE Gould and Vanderbilt families?
Few persons have any idea how much
a pro rata division of all the money in
the country would yield to each one of
us. man, woman or child. 1t is very
simple problem in division, but it would
require some tall Yankee guessing to
give the correct answer off-hand. Some
would say $1,000. some $4,000 and some
S1OO. All would be far wrong
The fact was aScertained from re-
cent statement issued by the Secretary
of the Treasury, in response to a resolu-
ton adopted by the Senate. that if all
the money in this big land were whack-
ed up-that is, all the money in the
United States Treasury. and in the
banks, and trust companies and private
safes and money drawers and stock
ings, and old stoves-only about $50 for
each individual would be forthcoming
Sunday Journal" reporter put the
question to number of people who
claim to be up to date. and their esti-
mates of the sum they would receive
ranged from 81 600 to 100000. The
total amount of money in the United
States on January l, 1896. according to
the statement of the Secretary of the
Treasury, was 50, 197 600, 236; the popu-
iation was about 70,G30, 600
What would I DO with my share?"
said The Only William" New York's
best drink mixer, in answer to the
query. well, my boy. I would have so
much wealth that it would take me sew
eral days to decide what / would do To
begin, [ can just get along as we'll the
! way I'm fixed now as if / had the $40
! oO0 or 100000 which would be coming
| to me under the equal-division-o of
wealth scheme. But if | had it l think
my first impulse would be to give up my
| present position and start a school for
the education of bartenders BY doing
this [ would save nearly as many men
from misery anG premature death. oc-
| casioned by the drinking habit, as are
now victims to the ignorance of the bar
tender"
| When William was informed that his
share in the country's coin would only
be $50 he exclaimed: None of that
| for me! 1t is better as it is. Why.
=
| spend $50 so easily gotten in day or
| two, and then where would the great
majority be?
Il tell you" added '"The Only" mo
such foolish socialistic ideas will ever
gain foothold in this country. and
God help the man who seriously at
tempts to advocate any such ideal"
| Professor Timothy O'Brien is a we'll
known hCqllr- of IS
the inclement season. His patrons are
principally lawyers, Judges and literary
men afflicted with catarrh and other
| disagreeable head and throat troubles.
IF ever get what you suggest" sai
the professor % his questioner, Il would
not stop to think what I would do with
| the goods mean the money. 1t would
probably be near 100000 and at that
figure I would not be compelled to
knock my neighbor down and highway
him under the pretense of poverty.
Easy come, easy go, is the usual maxim.
and generally a true one, where money
is concerned, yet. if all the Inhabitants
| of the United States were put on an
| equal footing financially on a certain
| date. there would be fewer fools than
we have now. There are lots of people
who have lots of good opportunities
earlier in their lives who are still active
and anxious enough to grasp at any
/ thing favorable and profitable now"
| Professor O'Brien was shown the
/ statement issued by the Secretary of
the Treasury which would make every
body worth $50,
THAT $50" he said 'tWouldn't 'cnt
any ice with any body except the
brokend down element of society, who
nightly frequent the station-houses and
parks Nowadays there is hardly man
living who could make his mA.k in the
world starting with $50, when all his
competitors were equally we'll equipped.
If the equal distribution of the country's
money would give each inhabit&nt sew
eral thousand dollar, then there would
be some interest in such a scheme but
few people would lose any sleep over the
actual picayune award which the aver
age shows. ! wouldn't want to see The
day when such an equality exists in this
or any ether country"
Jimmy Harris does nothing every
day but run an elevator in a big, tall
downtown office building. ard think.
"Jimmy's" estimate of the couutry's
money was such that his share, he
judged, would be abot,t $4,000
THE boss he said, would get the
same amount. too. Then the first thing
[ would do would be to raise a strike
against the boss, and if all the men we,e
as we'll fixed as l would be / could get
them out sure. Then l would come
around and watch him run the elevator
and make complaints against him for
being no good and running the machine
IT. time that such a scheme was start
ed to give the working man a chance
but there doesn't seem to be ANYBODY
with brains enough to take hold of it."
Harris face heightened somewhat
when he was informed that $50 was all
he could get out of an equal division of
the money. Then" he said. 'if that,s
ali there is in it, L guess you're only
wasting your own time and mine in
talking about becoming Independent on
as much as L can earn in three weeks
Martin Butler, member of the finest
police force in the world. thought there
would be about 81, 200 coming to him If
division were made He said he would
lose no time in resigning his ioh on tba
force and would never wear the ..tin,,
again II he could help it. Martins am
bitlon IS to start in some business. pre-
ferably the liquor business, and such a
sum as he thinks his share of the money
IN the country should be would be about
the amount necessary to start with. He
was disappointed to know that there
would only be about $50 coming to him
and denounced any scheme to make
Such paltry division. and resumed his