Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1896-02-07
Washinatun Standara
A HYMENEAL REVENGE.


No class of individuals is better
situated to see the unique and hui
morous side Of human nature and
experience than is the clergy, and
no feature of IA ministers eXper-
fence brings into stronger relief
the quirks, foibles and folies of
mortal man and woman than does
his official service at the hymeneal
altar.
When the subject of queer mar
riage ceremonies was proposed to
DIR. p. S. Henson, pastor of the
First Baptist Church. the fun-lov-
ing divine laughed heartily and ex-
claimed:
"Certainly I've had scores of
them! But none of them more in
terested and amused me than one
in which l was a participant few
years ago.
Il" / was sent for in the greatest
possible haste one evening to per-
form marriage ceremony. was
totally unacquainted with any of
the persons concerned, and had
never heard of either of the con.
tracing parties.
Gas they stood before me l no.
ticed that the invariable nuptial
smile was missing. They were as
solemn as pair of sphinxes. This
seemed trife strange, but at
tributed it to the possibility that
they entertained unusually serious
view of the step which they were
about to take. What was my sur
prise, when after putting to him
the pledge to take the woman al
his side to be his lawful welded
wife to love and cherish, ETC., he
he remained absolutely silent. AT
ter recovering from my surprise {
little l said to him:
"' please make your responses
SIR
"But no response escaped hi
tight shut lips. I thought b,
might be so stupid as not to under
stand the meaning of the word re
spond, so again acted as prompts
and said: sst
"Will you answer yes to m,
question:
"'Well, I Dunno he replied.
Here was pretty mess; Tn
afraid I was just about at the boil
ing point and l answered sharply:
off you don't know, 1 am Ger
tain that l don't!
"Half a dozen of the BRIDE
friends exclaimed: 81.
"Speak up, john
why don't you answer?
"Go ahead, John!
"Then it occurred to me tina
the groom might DO the victim o
a conspiracy of some sort, that he
might have been brow.beaten
badgered and constrained into thu
marriage. However, as the situa
ton was becoming unbearably en-
barrassing, in final desperation
exclaimed:
"WelI, sir you must answer 81
will" or II will not" That seem,
to be the only way in which WI
can get at your intentions in thi'
matter"
"There was a considerable pc
Rod of hesitation, followed by tn,
sulky response:
Well, then II WILL"
"The woman made her answe
with nervous alacrity and the re
mainder of the ceremony was com
pleted in short order. No soone
was it over than the groom took {
seat in the nearest chair, while tn
bride went into Mysteries and wa
carried out of the room by he
friends.
"The man continued to be sui
len and non-committal, and ! finall,
went home in a very unhapp,
frame of mind. The affair worries
me for several days, until I chance'
to look out of my study window
and was dumb.founded to see tn
couple. approaching, arm in arm
and as loving as pair of turtl'
doves. They had come for thei
marriage certificate, and their face
beamed with pleasure when it wa
presented to them. At the frs
opportunity l drew the HUSBAND
aside and asked him to explain BIZ
peculiar conduct during ths
ceremony.
al tell. ye, doc he replied
with an air Of shamefaced candor
me and Sal had a little spat thai
afternoon, an I jes' thought II
take it out O her right at the
weddin' ceremony-an' l didP"