The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1896-08-22
HUM BUG.
Mary Kyle Dallas Discusses sundry Phases
of 1t,

OF 1t.
what world of CANNON and spin
ach it isl" said little Miss Mowcher.
Some things have changed since Dick
ems sent that little lady into the world.
but not that. 1t is world of CANNON,
yet Il world where hambug succeeds and
truth fails, and am much afraid it al
ways will be, for the victims seem to
like to be cheated, and in their turn try
the same thing on their neighbors, so
that it is quite merry 60 round of
butcher, baker and candlestick maker,
merchant, lawyer and Wall street man,
and the whole tribe of money makers of
all professions and both sexes, to say
nothing of the rest of creation.
To place anything upon the market
without telling great fibs about it is i'm
possible.
Once upon time plain man named
Brown, knowing of q medicine which
was excellent for pains under the apron,
made up quantity of it, bottled it and
printed on the label, Good for stomach
ache.
If plain, honest man should remem-
Der that in his youth his respected
grandmother was wont to cure him of
pains under the apron by administering
Il certain mixture, and making guam
tity, call it "good for the stomach
ache" and thus labeled place it OH the
market, do you suppose it would sell?
No, indeed. But let him dub the mix
ture "Egypt's secret, J." and declare that
mysterious, yelled woman brought it
to the bedside of an ancient emperor
and saved his life thereby, and that the
emperor bought the formula for vast
sum, also that all this-recipe included
was copied from an obelisk by a great
Psychologist, and the sales will be i'm
mense, and he will make his fortune.
So with the sewing machines, type
writers and bicycles-each must be the
best and only, all others of no value
/ whatever, or they would rust on the
manufacturers hands.
| doubt if any woman is foolish
enough to believe that any face powder
can give her 1.-THE complexion of an an
gel for life Oh one application, but she
will buy it at high price simply be-
cause of the printed falsehood to that
effect, and often, if she is an actress of
distinguished beauty, sign testi-
monial which declares that the rice
powder or bismuth or whatever it may
be is all that it's advertiser claims for
it. One professional lady has, to the
knowledge of every one who reads the
newspapers, publicly declared that 20
different cosmetics are each the only
one she ever uses, and that she owes her
f1awless skin and youthful beauty en-
tirely to that special preparation. Yet
these testimonials are of value in max
ing sales.
AS for soaps, their name is legion,
and each is the only soap that has any
virtue in it. So in fact, with everything
that is advertised for sale; so with more
important things. The plain, truth tell
ing doctor is not apt to have many pa
tients. The lawyer who stuck to facts
would starve. To befool the jury and
bewilder the judge is to be an eminent
member of the bar. Fancy the fate of
the lover who, when asked by his lady
love if he ever loved before and is sure
he will love her forever, should answer,
"Well, my dear, only once or twice,
and as for loving you forever, no man
knows the future" Do you suppose he
would ever marry that girl? No, indeed.
He must swear that he never even
thought another girl pretty before he
saw her and that no hideous disfigure-
ment would make her less beautiful and
no crime less angelic to his constant
heart
If he does not, the fellow who will
say it will get her. We women, most of
all, insist upon being humbugged by the
men whom we love. They dare not tell
us the plain, unvarnished truth, though
they are as true as the best, as honest
as any men ever are to women. They
must lie to us to keep our trust and con-
fidence MARY KYLE DALLAS