West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1896-07-30
FARMER B0WSER.
HE TRIES HIS HAND AT MILKING
A CROSS COW.
Goes at His Work With the BIithe.
some Heart OF Dairy Maid. But
Soon Gets the Stuning Kicked Out
OF Him.

The "real' COW which the Bow.
sers were to have with their summer
farm finally appeared one evening,
in company with tow headed boy,
and when she had been turned into
the barn yard Mr.. Bowser went up
to the house and said
"Well, she's here at last; and
now for the romantic diary bust.
ness. Come out and look the crit
ter over and see me do the milking
act."
She was a COW with "crumpled
horn" More than that, she was
understood and scrubby, and her
eye did not have that frank limo.
cent expression always to be found
in the patient and humble minded
COW.
II don't like her looks" was
Mrs. Bowser's verdict, after long
survey.
"What did you expect p" asked
Mr.. Bowser. "Did you imagine
she'd have two humps like a drom-
edary, or trunk like an elephant
A COW is COW. If you arc look
ing for rhinoceros or buffalo
you'll have to go further"
I've seen cows BEFORE" replied
Mrs. Bowser, with a little pepper
in the tones. "Sho may be better
than she looks, but ! think you'll
be disappointed in her. She's
evidently very common stock"
ooh, she is, ell That shows
how much you know about COWS.
She's pure Leghorn, and I'd like to
see you find better breed"
81 never heard of a Leghorn
cow" exclaimed Mrs. Bowser.
Haven't you That's wonder
ful J Perhaps you never heard Of
Southdown or Merino COW? There
are lots of things for you to learn
yet, especially about farming. l
don't say that this COW is as hand.
some as Lillian Russell or as grace
ful as an elephant. but what we are
after is milk and cream. She's
Leghorn, if / know anything about
COWS, and she'll probably have to
be MIXED about five or six times a
day. l will now open the perform
ance."
Il don't believe you ever MIXED
a COW in your life," said Mrs.
Bowscr, as he began to roll up his
sleeves.
Don't you2 Well, prepare for
a surprise. The day you put on
short dresses / MIXED sixteen COWS
and churned twenty pounds of but.
ter, may be little rusty, butt
"But what ?"
81 was just thinking whether you
MIXED Loghorn COW on the right
or left side. It's on the left, |
guess"
"All COWS are MIXED on the
right-hand side, Mr.. Bowser."
"Perhaps so; but wen try this
one on the left. I'll use that old
soapbox for a milkstool. You can
sit down on that stone and sing
while / play dairymaid. This was
one Of the things that induced me
to hire this farm for the summer
coming out to milk our own Leg
horn COW as the shades of even.
ing"
The shades Of evening didn't fall,
but that COW kicked up a hind foot
and sent the milk pail wbirling
twenty feet away and as Mr.. Bow
ser lodged he fell of the box, and
| MS Ieet came up ana gave the COW
a double kick and sent her rushing
away.
"By the great horn spoon - he
shouted, as he turned over and got
up, "but I'll have her life to pay
for this -
81 told you it was the wrong
side" protested Mrs. Bowser.
Wrong side DO hanged What's
the difference to a COW ? She's
mere to be milked, aud she can't
have her own way about things.
II she tries that little game on me
again IN break her in two ! Wen
drive her into corner over there.
| Come 10 remember, Deghorn COWS
always have 70 be driven into a cor
ner to be MIXED"
Mrs. Bowser brought bim tho
pail and together they cOrnerod up