The mirror. (Stillwater, Minn.) 1894-1925, 1896-11-12
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Mary naO n lltCo CALL
1t worried Mary sO,-
For every where that Mary wheeled
Her calf was sure to show.
l.. A. w. Bulletin.
"The name of my lawyer" said
the burglar who had just been con-
victed, 'should be necessity. L
am sure he knows no aw"-Up-
To-Date.
If some mems faces were as
black as their hearts, they would
not be tolerated one hour in a.
decent community. - Lakefield
Search Light.
If people would take as much
pains to avoid trouble as they do
to get out of it, life would have
fewer rocky spots in it's path
Pine Island Record.
Women often wonder why men
go out and "see man" with such
unfailing regularity, between the
acts? Did you ever stop to think
ladies, that it is because your hats
will not let them see the stage, and
that they don't want to go home
without seeing some thing!-St..
Louis Humorist
If the portraits of all the women
who have been convicted of shop
lifting during the past year We're
exhibited in some public place it
might abate the fever for petty
stealing. Kleptomaniacs would
not like to be shown up in that
way. It would enable their ac-
quaintances to see through false
names.-Boston Budget.
When publisher publishes the.
truth he is damned by some wick
ed cuss who happens to be hit
pretty hard. Only extremely ig-
norant people will damn the pub
Usher when he proves another to
be falsifer. It is waste of en-
ergy to undertake to refute what
they say. Like skunk, they are
harmless, but for the stink they
make.-Grove City Times.
The standard of manhood, more
than that of money Of any kind, is
what makes country, and what
we need today is a larger quantity
of the former. There are men on
our streets today, enjoying all the
benefits of American citizenship,
whose talk and actions should for
ever Danish them to a more con-
genial climate Minneapolis Mir
rOr.
A New York woman subsists on
morning glory pods soaked in holy
water and expects the angels to
carry her to heaven. Some fine.
morning she will grow tired of that
thin diet and grow weary of wait
ing for the angels, and then she
will turn in, and order a good
square meal of ham and eggs and
fapjacks.-Centralia (Mo.) Fire
side Guard.
Nearly all the lessons taught the
young men are untrue. The pleas
ant fictions we invent to encourage
the young are simply mischievous;
falsehOOds. Many Young people
who find nothing but disappoint-
ment become disguised with the
world, whereas they would have
been content had they been told
the truth. The world is good
enough and we cannot improve it
by weak sentimentalism. -Arkan-
saw Thomas Cat.
While it is true one-half the
world does not know how the other
half live, it comes very near being
a fact that whole lot of that other
half don't seem to care. 1--we got
enough troubles of my own, don't
mention yours" is a pitiless an
swer to an appeal for assistance or
sympathy, but it is very frequent
one. The average mortal may
have lots of other things in his
makeup, but it is safe to bet on a
big per cent. of selfshness.-Mor-
ris Sun.
My son, follow not in the foot
steps Of the loafer, and make no
pattern of the example of him who
is born tired, for verify [ say unto
you, their business is overstocked,
and the seats on the corners are all
occupied. It is better to saw wood
at two bits cord than to white
in a loafing match and cuss the
uovernment Nv son while thnll