The diamond drill. (Crystal Falls, Iron County, Mich.) 1887-1996, 1896-09-19
Nasty ON SILVER.
petroleum v. Nasby. in ISIS.

state OF lAentucky). Jhn .~-s ioso urn
40 certin that want the silver bill TO
pass ez was. The fac. Is, the thing
cont work ez sposed II wood. and
amt clear onto II. There Is suttle
principles in these finanShel questions
which requires great deel NV thought,
and there is underlying principles witch
"a man has got to understand afore he
is competent 10 set hisself up ez author
ity.
One thing I'm certin Nv. Bascom ain't
no finanscer, nor never will be, and
told him SO.
swat n n finanseer?" asked he.
"a finanseer." sed /, sssooming the
look of Danl Webster. lis man witch
kin pay lis debts with nothin-a man
witch kin git suthin with nothin'.
The Corners, then, is full OF finan-
seers," he remarkt, bitterly, castin'
casual glance ut his slate. wlch wuz jist
full enuff 10 turn over and begin on
the tother side.
But he hezn't any NV the science uvit.
l wuz argooing with him the other day
in favor NV my noshun Nv "a leather cur
rency though l told him silver wuz
much the same thing, and, for example.
l would assoom that silver wuz 10 be
the currency Nv the fucher.
NOW, don't 700 see, Bascom, that eff
he'd twict ez much money, Good drink
twict ez much whisky, and pay for itg"
How much is twice nothin?" wuz the
unfeelin anser of the tyrant who
holds the destinies Of the Corners In his
hands. That's wot yoor captile hez bia
ever since hnowd yoo."
"Parson," sed he, II don't see what
earthly difference its gon' to make
whether silver is currency or anything
else. How are 700 a-goin' to git silver
eff 4: Is made legal tender? Ef silver
wuz ez plenty ez bricks, wat hev 700 to
git any NV it with?"
'Troo, o. w." was my answer; "but
can't you see that to hey silver wood re-
leeve the dettor class? Even now. afore
it Is legal tender, it's only with o2c on
the dollar, and when the country is
fioodid with it, il will go still lower.
Then we-or rather sich NV us ez hev
property TO raise money on-kin pay
! Off"
"Eggsactly So" retorts Bascom; ''you
kin pay me for the good hopist likker nv
mine, witch you hev consumed ia coin,
witch Is less than the dollar you prom
Used. All rite. But look here-come in
here, all NV you. ! want you silver mon
to know exactly wat 700 are iushin'
into"
And this feend led us into the back
room-that back room which contanes
the subsistence NV the Corners. There,
in long rows, wuz Bascom's stock There
in barrils, piled one on top NV another,
wuz the delishus whisky NV Louisville,
Nv different nges, rangin' from hat NV
two weeks old 90 that witch he'd list left
the still, and wuz scarcely cold yit.
There IL lay, and ez my eye ranged
affcckshunately over IL, felt 80 Good
hev the drinkin' NV all that lillSer
wood be content to lay down and die
when the last drop wuz gone
Bascom p'inted to nm immense TANK
witch he had erected. within few days,
with "A pipe running in from the roof.
II shan't raise the price NV lilsker in
conscience nv bein' paid for IL in
depreshiated currency" said he.
| fell on Bascom's neclS. in an extacy
nv delite, while the others saoutid;
"Rah for Bascoml"
&c. W." / remarltt, while tecrs suf-
foosed my eyes, ~ never placed 700
much below the angels, but this gcner-
Gus act has histid 700 n hundred PER
cent in my estimnshun. Bless 700, G..
W., bless 700"
But I'll tell you wat shell do. DO
700 see that tank 2" sed he
MAY ! ask wat that is for?" Sod.
THAT tank will fiji with rane-water,"
sed he. "rhe moment 700 git TO payin'
me in silver. / shell take out NV eech Nv
them barrils jist eggsacl<ly three and
one-ffth gallons nv lil.ker. and I'LL it
with water"
| "Merciful hevings!" we al exclaimed,
"and poor liltker so weak nowl"
And when silver gifts down TO Is
cents on the dollar. shell take out %
per cent. NV whisky and I'll her up with
25 per cent. NV water. And so on down.
Ef silver goes up / shell add whisky
eggsackly in proporshen. In short, my
whisky is jist agoin TO foller currency.
and nothin' shorter. 700 fellers witch
work for wagis may SWEET, but won't"
But yoo'll increase the size NV yoor
| glasses?" sed /.
Not eny. But 700 may drink twice
ez many times TO git the same amount
NV drunk ez before, by payin' for each
drink"
And Bascom stallSed hawtily back
/ and took his posishen behind his bar
Their wuz consternnshun in the Corn.
ers SIGH ez ! hev never seen. Their was
n hurried consultashun at the deelSin's
house and / sejested that we emanci-
pate ourselves from the dominyun nv
this tyrant by startin' grosery NV our
own. on the joint stock principle, which
wuz agreed TO, each man agreein' ~
| contribbit ten dollars 70 the canitlo