The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1896-11-05
THE TAsMANIAN "DEvn..

Ia5manla-Na DIemanS Land OF the Oider
aphies-boasts of having absolutely the
worst wild animal that lives. 1t is called
"devil," and seems more than commonly we'll.
named. 1t is described as about the size of a
large bulldog. It's head is one-third the length
of its body, and is Fat, broad, and hIdeous. Its
feet resemble those OF the badger, with big
claws, while its tail sticks out stiflly. Its coat
looks like wool rubbed the wrong way, and the
general appearance of the beast is of kind
that makes avoidance appear the wisest policy.
The creature becomes veritable hend when
disturbed ever so slightly. He attacks every
thing before him, dead or living, and in his
mad rage flies at mastiT door with equal
ferocity. He always fights to the finish, know
ing neither truce nor quarter. SO long as there
is shred of flesh to tear bone to shatter
he cings to his foe, and, unmiudful of the in
jury he may receive, he plies his powerful
jaws until his strength fails.
Gold-seekers and diamond diggers are rap
idly illuminating Darkest Africa with the light
of civiliz tion which flows from rum, faro Ia
bles, stock gambling, and boom towns.
x*x
A few of the fellows who make trade of ca
lamity bowling now taking hack at the
bicycle, and find enough evil tendencies in it
to shame Sodom and Gomorrah. The bicycle
will flourish all the same.
x*x
Gall quiet along the Hellespont" nowadays,
except that when kurd happens TO want
something that he hasn't n the house he rides
over to the next Armenian village. murders a
few dozen and robs them of enough to supply
him. =.
The fervent heat Of the campaign
Dried down the springs of comradely affection;
But now the, re yelling up again
Much stronger since the election.
1t is popularity believed that Russell Sage
can see dollar farther catch it quicker, and
hold on to it tighter than any other American
citizen. On the other band. his wife is quite
liberal, especially toward charities. while
ago the solicitors for charitable enterprise
approached Mr.. Sage with a request for a con-
tribution. He took the book. and, noticing on
it Mrs. Russell Sage. s25." quietly wrote be-
fore his wifes name Mr.. apd".
e
TIE New York World and Journals sharp
competition in the worst possible pictures has
filled the pockets of men who want to be artists
but can never possibly learn to draw with taste
and correctness. The man who can make the
worst caricature of the squalidness and misery
Of the slums gets the biggest money.
80
Women spend much of their time sewing up
60 on a tear.
"Oh. Senator Stewart. Senator Stewart !.
How did Lazarus come to be so poor and Dives
so rich, thousands of years before the Crime of
'73?"
WHY SHE LEFT.
Lady-Why did you leave your last place?
Candidate for Superintendent of the Kitchen
Il resigned wild indignation, mum. The
man av the house WIZ no gentleman.
Lady-No gentleman? What was the
trouble?
Candidate-Why, he axed me, right afore
| me face as he took a bite av the shteak, if I
hadn't learned me trade in garbage crematory,
and been discharged because l didn't burn
things clear up"
s@z
IN MONTANA.
| English Tourist-HaI my good man, tell me
| if there's much shooting up in your region?
| Wahsatch Bll-Dead loads an gobs of it, if
| you include shooting off mems mouths.
| English Tourist-Bless me, what barbarity
| Shooting off meu's mouths, / never heard of
such >savagery before. Some new deviItry of
those terrible cowboys, / presume!
| #*z
! "Men reason. Women only feel" said the
| SententiOus Prig.
| "Certainly men reason" snapped the boarder
| whose liver was always out of order; that's
! why several million men in this country are
| to-day carrying around in their pockets either
a buckeye to keep OF rheumatism. rabbits
| foot to give them good luck. Women feel
certainly. They feel anything that looks like
cruelty very keenly. That's why every blessed
| one of 'em has to have q sweet song bird OF
the forest killed in order to decorate her hat
| with it"
And then the landlady took it out on the
waiter for dripping coffee on the tablecloth.
|
PERSONAL
A medal has been awarded to James Jackson
Purman, First Lieutenant, Co. A, 10th Pa
now residing in Washington. At the battle Of