davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-03-08
These Drs.
Do 1t.

DO what! cq y,2s,,y !sSs;.'s't q
AFFLICTED with . P ! ~ ahsfs ~
and Specialists fall. 1 Apss''ss |
this assertion can pe ~ Ike! p
WHAT DoCToRs .asccossissi !
way W & Co, who are !, r : stIII psyf!
Specialists in this &c cSu Eoi,,n !
necllIIar to men anu mo-, snsrp "
others follow. cons onSsuii.n liz ~
sible time consistent w" (
tic treatment
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-03-08
The BASE BALL Sc

Is now at hand and the usual
complete assortment OF Base b
win be found at
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-03-08

I.OVEJOY & SAMPSON
Attorneys and Counsellors at
weston, Texas, have establishe
Offices in Houston. Texas, Blnz
Rooms a22. S2S and a2i, with ALE
kins.
The Houston daily post. [volume] (Houston, Tex.) 1886-1903, 1896-03-08

, NE Steamship Rita. which cleared fo,.
liverpool had SIS hsles of notton vi,, 10
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
The Funnel Trick,

Jerry Lynch has finally learned
the funnel trick. He took it in two
doses-one on one evening and the
other the next. The Senator sauntered
up to the Bohemian Club the other
day and saw two or three of the
younger members attempting new
feat, and he watched them with in
terest. One of them stuck funnel in
the top of his trousers, threw his head
back, placed fifty cent piece on his
forehead and tried to drop it in the
funnel by slowly lowering his head.
After all had failed Jerry insisted on
trying it, though all had tried to dis
suade him from attempting feat too
difficult for them. The funnel was
placed in the waistband of his trousers
and he threw back his head to receive
the coin on his expansive brow. At
that iuncture pitcher of ice water
was emptied into the funnel, and by
the time Jerry had got through danc-
ing the jokers had vanished. The Sen
ator's temper improved with dry raj.
ment, and The next night at the club
he started to show couple of friends
the funnel trick.
"It's this way" he explained; "you
put the funnel in the top of your
pantaloons, So, then throw your head
back 70, and-vow !"
Again Jerry was forced to change
his raiment, and be is not showing
people what he knows about the fun
mel trick. -san francisco News Letter.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
His Ono Great Trouble.

An old, bedridden fisherman at fash
ionable watering place was frequently
visited during his last illness by a kind
hearted clergyman, who wore one of
those close-ftting clerical vests which
button behind.
The clergyman saw the near ap.
proach Of death one day in the old
mans face, and asked if his mind was
perfectly at ease.
800 ay, I'm rich," came the feeble
reply.
ssYou are sure there is nothing
troubling you? Do not be afraid to
tell me"
The old man seemed to hesitate, and
at length, with a faint return of ami
nation said: "Weel, there's just ae
thing that troubles me, but dinna
like to speak o't."
"Believe me, I am most anxious to
comfort you," replied the clergyman.
"Tell me what it is that troubles and
perplexes you"
"Weel, sir, it's just like this" said
the old man eagerly, 81 Gamma for the
life O. me maxi oot hoo ye manage tae
get intae that westcoat. ."-Tit-Bits.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
An Int xicatlns Mell.

When a temperance man bores TO,
we'll water, and is rewarded with 9
sparkling stream, whereof he drinks
delightedly, only to find that its
effects very closely resemble those of
good brand of whisky, is he to be
banished from the society of the elect !?
That would seem to be the problem
confronting the people of Mill Creek,
Putnam County, Ind, where one Casa
Broadstreet. an hitherto upright citl-
zen, found we'll of this description,
whose product made it utterly impos-
sible for him to maintain his upright.
ness. He was obliged to secure Ger
tlfcate, based on chemical analysis,
from the professors of Depauw Uni.
verBlty, that the water in question
contained no whisky. But its effects
were obvious, and the saloon men near
by insisted that Mr.. Broadstreet
shoald either take out o license or
plug up his well. Detroit FREQ Press.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
Sheep Jumping Hedges.

Anent sheep jumping hedges I may
venture here to tell tale Of certain
old rogue who went by the name of
Tup.Harry. This is how he got his
nickname: Harry was small farmer
and he had q neighbor with better
means and better farm than his own.
One very dry season Harry had come
to the end of his grass for flock OF
sheep he possessed. His neighbor had,
however, got q fine field of mangel.
wurzel. Harry looked over the hedge
"a hedge furnished with outstanding
slates-and greatly longed for those
mangels for his sheep; but lie did not
relish the risk OF being caught taking
them. So he went in.the evening into
his field, that was bare of gross, pnt
his head against the hedge, bent his
back and called: "Tupl Tupl Tupl'
whereupon up ran his old ram, jumped
on his back, went onto the hedge and
ovor into the mangel field and oil the
flock in Indian file scampered after
him over the back of Harry.
Very early in the morning the rogue
went into the devastated mangel field,
put his head against the edge, ben,
his back and called: ''Tup! Tup
Tupl" and up came the ram, ron over
his back onto the edge and returned
to the barren q Ter again, followed
in Indian file ~ al the flock. Thai
was done several times and no sign!
appeared anywhere OF the hedge being
broken through or of o padlocked gate
having been opened. At last the far
mer who was robbed hid himself one
night and saw the whole proceeding
Tup- Harry did not try that trick OF
again. Chambers's Journal.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
Firing a Cannon un!er Wator.

The most curious experiment evel
made with piece of ordnance was al
Portsmouth, England. A stage was
erected in the harbor within the side
mark; on this IN Armstrong gun o!
the 1lO-pound pattern was mounted.
The gun was then loaded and carefully
aimed at target-all this, OF course,
during the time of low tide. A few
hours later, when the gun and the
target were both covered with water
to depth of six feet, the gun was
fired by means of electricity. We esaid
Gained at target" but the facts are
that there were two targets, but onl!
one was erected for this special expert.
ment, the other being the hull of an
old vessel, the Griper, which lay di'
rectly behind the target and in range
of the ball. The target itself was
placed only twenty-five feet from the
muzzle of the CUR. 1t was composed
of oak beams and planks, and was
twenty. one inches thick. In order to
make the old Griper invulnerable,
sheet of boiler plates three inches
thick was riveted to the water.logged
hull in direct range With the course
the ball was expected to take if not
detected by the water. On MI OF these
the oaken target. the boiler plates
and the old vessel hull-the effect OF
the shot from the submerged gun was
really startling. The wooden target
was pierced through and through, the
boiler.iron target was broken into
pieces and driven into its backing, {"
the ball passing right on through both
sides of the vessel, making huge hole,
through which the water poured in
torrents. Taken altogether, the ex-
pertinent was IN entire success, de-
monstrating, as it did, the feasibility
of placing submerged guns in harbors
in time of war and doing great dam
age to the vessels which IN enemy
might dispatch to such points for the
purpose of sLeliin6 cities. .vention.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
The Largest Ship.

The Great Eastern was the larges.
ship ever built. She was 6SO feet long.
It was in 1854 that the ship was com
menced at Milwall and not until Janu.
ary, 1853, was she launched after many
difficulties.
From first the Great Eastern was
unfortunate financially. Several trips
were made to the United States at a
loss each time to her owners and not
until she was employed in the laying
of the cable did she redeem berself.
After the successful completion OF
the laying of the Atlantic cable she was
utilized in laying other cables acros;
the Atlantic. through the Mediter
rsnean and Red Seas.
1883 the Great Eastern was sold at
auction in Liverpool to be broken up.
The price she brought was $3.50, 72O.
1t is thought that if she had been
fitted up with the improved machinery
OF to-day she could still have been run
at profit.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
Curiositles OF Hailstones.

humboldt, the great scientist and
an rndisputed authority Oh asmos
pheric as we'll as other natural phes
nomena, tells of hailstorm which
passed over Tuscany on March IL,
1918, every ice globule of the entire
fall being of beautiful orange color.
Five years prior to that extraordinary
event, Carniola, Germany, was treated
to fall of Eve feet of blood req
snow. This was folio wed by fall OF
blue hail, which is said to have given
ssthe whole foce of nature an exceed
ingly curious aspect"
Red hailstones fell at Amsterdam in
1925, at London in 1868 during the
time of the great plague), and at
divers places in Ireland and France
during tine early part OF the present
century.
In 1928 o monstrous hsilstone fell
at Munson, Mass. 1t is describe | in
the Waltham Register of July 18th of
that wear as follows: Extremes, four
feet long, three feet wide and two feet
thick. After the rough part OF the
body had been removed there re-
mained a clear, solid block Of ice two
feet three inches long, one foot and
six inches wide and one foot and three
inches thick.
The most extraordinary bailstcrm
of history. as far as the queer shapes
OF the hailstones were concerned. was
that which occurred on the Wadi
oasis in the desert of Sahara, in 1881.
The individual ice chunks were OF all
imaginable forms. There were wheels
with four, six and eight spokes, dumb
bells, large and small, triangles,
cylinders, both solid and hollow, some
of the solid ones being as much as six
inches in length and not larger In
diameter than lead pencil. The
common round haIlstones congealed
together in their descent, forming
into fantastic pyramids, like the old
pictures of the piled-up cannon balls;
some took upon themselves the forms
of gigantic punches of grapes, and
other masses "fell in the shape OF
necklaces, crowns, crosses, etc."
In g hailstorm in Wisconsin N
1886 the individual "stones" were OF
many odd shapes and forms. Some
were shaped like ginger snaps, others
like watches, loayes of breaI, etc. =
Atlanta Constitution.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
WORDS OF WISDOM.

Reading makes full man, conyezsa.
tion a ready, and writing an exact
man.
Virtue, if not in action, is q vice;
and when we move not forward we go
backward.
Every noble life leaves the fiber OF
il interviewer forever in the work OF
the world.
Life's reckoning we cannot make
twice over. You cannot mend wrong
subtraction by doing your addition
right.
It is awful hard io convince q man
that his wife loves him when he gets
up in the night and finds the match
box empty.
Many man who claims to be look.
ing for work wouldn't recognize job
if it stepped up and tapped him on
the shoulder.
To be free minded and cheerfully
disposed at hours of meat. sleep and
exercise, is one of the best precepts oil
long teaching.
If you would be pungeut, be brief;
for it is with words as with sunbeams,
they more they are condensed the
deeper they burn.
The wise man is but learner in
fact, spelling letters from o hiero.
graphical, prophetic book, the lexicon
Of which lies in eternity.-The South
West
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
Queer Animal Pygmies.

Pygmies are not confined to- the hu
man race, but are found among the
lower animals. One of the most re-
markable of these dwarfs was species
of elephant which formerly lived on
the island of Malta and in various
parts of Italy, where its bones are
now found. This creature, judging
from the bones which have been col
lected, was about the size of sheep,
so we can imagine the baby pygmies,
q perfect elephant not much larger
than cat; On animal readily held in
the open palm of strong mans hand.
Dwarf elephants are not unknown to-
day, and several have been brought to
this country, where they seem to de-
velop wonderful intelligence.
The Shetland and other ponies are
the pygmies among horses, and in the
early days there was o horse hardly as
large as fox, if We may believe the
evidence of the rocks which have pre-
served the remains OF various fossil
horses.
A very beautiful pygmy deer group
is found on the Sunda Islands. These
little creatures ore not much bigger
than cat, while the young are beau,
tiful little animals, hardly the size OF
small rabbit, yet perfect in shape
and form. The ordinary musk deer OF
Central Asia is pygmy in every sense
of the word, and one of the most at
t.active of the tribe. To the natural
ist it is an undeveloped creature. 1t
is about three feet in length, twenty
inches high ct the shoulder, and has
in the male largely developed canine
teeth that project, so that they are
very conspicuous, and are used as
weapons in the contests which the lit
tie creatures wage one with another.
The sperm whale is perhaps the
largest, or very nearly the largest, liy-
ing animal, and in singular contrast
to it is the pygmy sperm that was dis
covered on the New Jersey sands few
years ago and forwarded as o rare
prize to the National Museum at Wash
ington. While the real sperm whale
is possibly eighty feet in length, the
pygmy speciman is but eight. This
little creature has the peculiar blunt
head, the toothed jaw of the big sperm,
but is very diminutive edition OF it,
especially when seen with the man
who found it. Its newly boen young
are when nursing not much longer
than o rabbit, while the ordinary
sperm infant is thirteen or fourteen
feet in length. Denver Republican.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
ARant.sma Sensation.

While the sacred rites of baptism
were being performed at Friendship
last Sunday morning, very ,sensa-
tional occurrence took place. Rev.
Mr.. Gibson had immersed twenty-nine
candidates, and while in the act Of i'm
mersing the thirtie ast, large
channel catfish ran up we good BROTH
er's trousers and proceeded to horn
him in an unmerciful manner. At
this point the ceremony was cut short
with "I baptize you," and q general
rush was made to rescue the reverend
gentleman from his peculiar predica-
ment. Miss Sentinel.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
Feed Your Bamboo Chairs.

The pretty and inexpensive bamboo
furniture so much used now requires
to be treated differently from the
ordinary wooden furniture. AS bam'
boo is liable to crack and come apart,
it must be fed so as to counteract the
ill effects of dryness in the room. The
furniture should be exposed to the air
whenever possible. Do not place too
near fire, and it should be rubbed
regularly with equal parts of linseed
oil and turpentine applied with fan
mel and then rubbed in with soft
cloth. An occasional wash in cold
water, followed by thorough drying,
ia good for bamboo furniture.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
A Healthful Temperature.

As the season has arrived for the
oyerhauling of the heating apparatus,
let each living room be supplied with
a thermometer as necessary adjunct.
A temperature of about seventy de.
grees should be maintained as most
conducive to health and economy. An
enervated system, susceptibility to
colds, and other disorders are superin-
duced by oyerheated apartments. A
person who dwells constantly in tenn
perature of eighty degrees cannot e1-
pect to enjoy either comfort or health
under such unhygieuic conditions
Health Magazine.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
AN EVERYDAY SCENE.

Pedestrian-"What's all that fuss
about in that house-wedding?"
Resident-"No. A new baby ar
rived last night, and all the women il
the neighborhood are going into costa
sizes over it.
"Who is that tall man all the wo-
men are crowding around"
"de is minister, come to hx e date
for the christenir ="
"And :. Is Une -yrt man who at
tracts % much attention%
"He is the doctor"
"Ah! I see. That no.account fel.
low, who is being pushed out of the
way or run over, is the hired man, ]
presume?"
"No; he's the father. New York
Weekly.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
OLDEST BOAT KNOWN.
Small Craft In Use 1880 Years Ago
Added TO a Museum.


There is in Chicago one Of the Eve
Oldest small boats known to exist in
the world. It has just come. all
packed ard staid for its long voyage
from the Gizeh Museum Of Antiquities
at Cairo. To the generosity of Mrs.
Cyrus Mccormick the Field Colum-
bisn Museum is indebted for rare
gsft. E. E. Aver learned in che course
OF his search for interesting things in
Cairo last winter, that there had been
placed in the Gizeh museum three
boats Of marvellous age and curious
design. Investigation proved that
the boats were indeed OF the rarest
value, for never before in archaeology
cal history have there been discovered
anything Of the kind which approached
these boats in age and interest. A
viking craft found in Norway sometime
ago was in use about the year 1000,
A, D., and at once became famous as
by far the Oldest specimen of water
craft in existence. Tho boats in the
Gizeh museum, it was decided by the
learned ones, were used at least 4, 800
years ago and were contemporaneous
with the Dashur pyramids of the
eleventh Egyptian dynasty.-Chicago
Journal,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
WHY SHE wEFT.

Willy-"I found mother the other
day crying over your book of poems. "
His Sisters Fiance delighted
"Ohl is that so?" tAside). "Ah!
what glory. What fame awaits me |
A man who can bring tears to the eyes
of such flnt-hearted woman as that
is certainly great, and no mistake. {"
ITO Willy. "She was really weeping,
Willy?"
Willy-"Yes: she said it nearly
broke her heart to think that q daugh-
ter of hers was going to marry man
who would write such rot as that. y
Puck.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04

some copy into the composing room.
'1've written an article that will
lose the rival candidates. two thou.
sand votes, at the lowest calculation. 7"
"Have you discovered something
damaging in her record?"
eyes. I can show beyond doubt
that she is wearing q last years bon
net, and that her clothes don'G fit her,
because she makes them herself. -
Washington Star:
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
Sppprs With HOLLOW Handles

The latest novelty with which silver
smiths have surprised the public is the
lemonade spoon. The handles OF these
spoons are hollow and can be used in
stead of straw. 1t is told that these
hollow handles are easily cleaned. The
new Lemonade spoons are things of
beauty, with gold bowls in leaf shape.
Plain common folk, however, will con-
tinue to drink their lemonade in the
old-fashioned way, for few sideboards
are large enough to hold the infinite
variety of new things in silver that the
enterprising silversmiths are devieiag
TO crafty luxurious pocketbooks
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
A DILEMMA.

Old Mrs. M, who was seriously i'll,
found herself in trying position,
which she defined to friend in these
words:
sfYcu see, my daughter Harriet is
married to one O. these homeypath
doctors and my daughter Kate to an
allypath. If l call in the homeypath
my allypath son.in law on his wife git
mad, an if call in my allypath son.
in law my homoypath son-in. law an
his wife git mad, an if 1 go ahead an
git we'll without either O. 'em, then
they'll both lie mad, so I don't see but
I'd better die outright. Detroit
Free Press.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04

DURING the existence of the British
Parliament it has passed about 20, 600
statutes, of which about 5000 are still
in force. OF these $500 were passed
in Queen Victoria's reign, Isl date
from Henry III, the first three Ed
wards and Richard II, % from the
House OF Lancaster, only 8 from that
of York, ITO come from the Tudors,
SO from the Stewards, 90 from William,
III, and Anne and 1882 from the
four Georges and William ~.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
hoods Pills :as ssa 3f;: 1sr 'sG5s sssiss ssa'ss sss
Home.Made Polishing Cloths.

Polishing cloths, such as jewelers.
nse, are warranted to keep silver in
brilliant condition without the disad-
vantage of q periodical upheaval Of
the plate closet. They prevent. more
over, the scratching which the applica-
tion of powders to the metal usually
produce. To make them, boil soft
rags in q mixture of fresh milk and
hartshorn powder, and ounce OF pow
der being used to q pint OF tho milk.
When they have boiled for five min
utes they should be hastily passed
through cold water, 30 that they will
be cool enough to wiring out and dry
before the fire. After the silver is
washed and dried each day, it should
be polished with cloth prepared in
this manner.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
Az Instantaneous Portrait.

.'I am tired to death, declared Mrs.
Younghusband, as she reached nome
from town the other evening.
whats the matter 2" asked her hus.
band.
''Been having baby's portrait taken.
They have way of taking them In
simultaneously now, you know"
"How long were you at it?"
'srhree sours and half. Comic
Cnts
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
Good Shot.

Quinn is good shot, isn't hep"
every good. We were practicing
with our guns at my country home the
other day, and he hit the bulls eye the
first time"
very clever"
"Yes; but he had to pay fer the
bull. ."-Tit- Bits.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
That JOYFUL Feeling

With the exhilarating sense ofrenewed health
and strength and internal cleanliness. whlca
follows the use of Syrup of Figs, is unknown
to the few who hare not progressed beyond
the old-time medicines and the cheap substi.
tutes sometimes offered but never accepted By
the well-informel.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
A CORRECTION.

'T tell you," said Mr.. Winterberry
after his return from his trip, "there's
no place like home. "
"Yes, there is, pa, !" said little john
ny Winterberry.
"Ahp And where, my son?" asked
the father.
"Home, of course" said Johnnie.
eff there wasn't any hcme, there
wouldn't be no place like it. "-Har-
per's Bazaar.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
ON THE SAFE SIDE.

"Hello!" said the voter to the Bill
Vile election manager, "Ten o'clock
at night, and the polls still open?"
"Yes," sighed the manager, every
urgent case" .
aWhy, the Law doesn't allow you"
"The law be hangadi" cried the
manager. "NIajor Jones hain't voted
yit, an he bought new rife yester-
day, an sent word he wuz a-coming.
/ hain't got thing ag'in the law, but
sslf-preservation's the fust law er ma
ture, an I'm a self-preserSationist!" !"
Atlanta Constitution.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
BARBARoUs.

wiping the gore from his glittering
weapon the desperate looking young
man seized piece of cloth and re-
moved, as we'll as he could, oil traces
of his horrible work from the face Of
his victim.
Then he Strengthened himself up,
pushed the unhappy wretch away from
him, and, in a voice of thunder, called
out:
"Nextl"
He was the apprentice. Chicago
Tribune.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
SUPERIOR TALENT.

"Does your vile understand poi
tics, Pilcher9"
"No, but when she puts up lunch
with eggs in it she does not forget the
salt and pepper. Chicago Record.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1896-11-04
rrrr cp1,rrrv OF wARFARE.

"I hate to do such thing" said
the editress of campaign newspaper
in q woman's suffrage community.
"But politics IS politics.
"What's the matter?" asked her
husband, who was waiting to carry