The record-union., 1896-04-19

y
men who Like to make some return tor
the many pleasant evenings enjoyed at
the home of a lady friend, but they
some way or other do not often materi-
aliZe.
.'We've got a telephone in our house!"
The above triumphant exclamation IS
often heard from the lips of a certain
young America, who makes frequent ex-
cursions on the frailest of excuses to the
'phone. This particular 'phene belongs
to the outward service" Otherwise the
class known as Kitchen telephones,
which are becoming very popular o.
late, for although one enjoys all the
privileges allowed to the professional
class. one cannot be annoyed by insist
ent call-bells, and there is just as mucn
fun to be CLEANED and solid service, too.
as with one of the other kind.
They are such a convenience to nave
in the house; people use them for busi-
ness, sociabili1y. and alas! even do their
ouarreling over the line sometimes,
which is a very risky thing to do, for IN
taking up the receiver to call up the
central station one often hears snatches
who is doing the same thing when you
are talking.
One evening on taking up the receiver
to call up a friend, this surprising bit or
sparring greeted my ears:
$50 you went to hear Paderewskl, cid
you?"
Yes l did,
"All right for you, 1 think you're just
as mean as you can be!''
why, you didn't say for certain you
would"
Yes. did, and you understood it per-
fectly You needn't say a word; you
know you did, and I'll never step my
foot inside your house again
But you didn't say
Eyes, / did, too; you needn't pretend
not to know, and I'll never step my foot
inside your yard again, never!'
After trying in vain to get centrafs S
ear across this tsngle of words, I gave
uH in despair and left the wranglers to
war it out.
Another time family seemed to be
trying it for the first time, mamma at
one end of the line endeavoring to per-
suade Tommy, evidently afraid of the
machine to talk to papa at the other
end. Now you try, Tommy-Hello.
papa, here's Tommy-say something to
papa, Tommy" etc.
Hello, sweetness! that your
YES"
We'll, just give me such number,
please; that's a good girl"
Another time-"IS he there?"
NO; he's just gone to church, but
oh
been a great many bitter tears shed
about it already"
well, I'd just like to have the chance
to tell him"
Its no use to say anything; there
have been too many bitter tears shed
about it already
Another: Did you go to the --
House?"
NO Why?'
"Oh, never mind, it's just as we'll you
didn't
But why?"
Because it's an April fool"
Who's tallling?"
Never mind, it's only an April fool"
And so it goes. It's a little indiscreet,
of course, to talk of ones private af
fairs over a public line, as one never
knows who will get the benefit of it, but
it's awfully amusing to those who hap
pen to "catch on to some of these lit
tie chance farces, and people who air
their family affairs in this way must
take the consequence.
The toboggan slide at East Park is
again in full operation, attracting
crowds of natives of every cline under
the sun, and of every shade of complex
ion known to the human race.
A funny incident occurred there
one day to the intense amusement of all
onlookers. A party of some four or five
people had just arrived, and were trying
to persuade one of their number to
take Slide She was quite persist
ent in her refusals at first, but her OBJ
jections We're finally overborne by the
rest of her party, and they entered a
car.
/ suspect strongly that she had an
inward conviction that she was about to
slide right off the earth, for she gripped
the car firmly on one side and a con
venient coat-sleeve on the other, keep
ing her eyes fiXedly shut all the while
that she might not know when the fate
full moment arrived. Her sigh Of relief
was something beautiful to hear when
once again her foot pressed terra firma
How time and years do change usi
1t is hard to realize that Lucy AuZerais-
Hoyte, the leading lady in the lively
drama that is interesting society at
present, is the same pretty Lucy Will
Jams who used to attend Sunday-schoo
at st. Pauls, and was a modest and
ladylike member of Sacramento society,
well thought OF by everyone who knew
her.
Nine. Marie Tietjens is at present fill
ing an engagement at Hull, Eng, hav-
ing been sent thither by her company In
sing in a series of recitals taken from
the opera of Faust" and presented en-
costume for the benefit of people whose
principles forbid their attending opera
bona fide Nine Tietjens is said TO
make a most charming, successful and
ideal Marguerite.
Chauncey Tietjens, brother Of the pop
ular prima donna, and formerly of Sac
iramento who has been studying veteri-
nary surgery in New York college, has
gone to try his fortunes in Jamaica. A
short tire since ne started for the same
destination, and when q short journey
out of New York was shipwrecled, los
ing his entire library, his clothing, in
s;ruments and money, barely escaping
with his life
His many friends in Sacramento Will
be glad to know that he has reached
Jamaica without further accident, and
hn.- established hi1nra.f there in fis