The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1896-05-16

y
a what-do-you-call-i machine as pres
emit to your father? I am quite sure
I don't care; but 1 bet your father will
be displeased, simply because he will
not be able to make head or tail of so
complicated thing"
"You have always fault to find with
my propositions" she pouted sensi-
lively; always. But take the bet.
What is it to be, for kiss?"
"a kiss! as though an every day affair
like that were an object for a wager"
My wife laid the index finger of her
right hand onto her little nose, her IA
vorite attitude when in a reflective
mood.
"The other day." she said, II noticed
a splendid brooch in SIS show window;
just the thing"
"And / a rocking chair at F.'s, such "a
l always longed to possess" added.
1T is bargain. Rocking chair against
brooch. If your what-do-you-call-it-
machine does it's duty, you will get your
brooch; if not, you are bound to buy me
the chair. Shake on It'll"
"All right" my wife acquiesced in a
triumphant tone.
She really purchased the extraction
machine, which, to judge from appear
ances, was pretty neat and brightly
polished little affair. The birthday ar
rived and we solemnly assembled in her
fathers house and handed him the
present, but he looked rather sur
prised.
''Well, well!" he exclaimed, "just
look at this! A filtering machine. Did
you ever! 1 must confess i like the
idea, for our city water is not very
clear and the supply is poor. 1t may
come in handy"
what are you talking about, my
dear father?" interrupted Anna excit-
eddy, and in an almost angry tone,
you do not really mean to say that
you think our love is so trifling rs to
buy you a filtering apparatus for a
birthday PRESENT."
The old man looked from one to the
other of us embarrassed.
God forbid" he said, feelingly, shat
l should think so i'll of my dear chill
dren, but, perhaps-yes, know, that's
it.; one of the newly invented patent
electric night lamps, eh?"
grinned. Anna looked daggers at
me.
1T is the new coffee machine. father,
DEAR" said my wife's sister Fan
ME, whose head is always full of mis-
chief. "You throw the beans in on one
side and cafe au lait' already made
| flows out on the other. Plain as day
light"
Fannie, my child" said I, with ali
the dignity / could muster, "please go
and bring some hot water and the nee
essary ground coffee, and give us a
| chance to demonstrate to father the
utility of this wonderful machine"
Fannie did SO. In the meantime the
old man walked several times around
the table shaking his silvery locks and
casting suspicious glances at the COM
plicated thing before him. He looked
positively frightened.
Say, OTTO" turning to me with an
anxious face, II hope that thing will
not explode? We read every day dread
full stories about these new-fangled
patents in the papers. Please be care
full, children. beg of you."
"Why, father, the whole proceeding
is so simple" my wife pleaded, defend
ing her present, lust read what it says
herel l take the water" taking the YES
sci with the hot water from Fannie
land pour it into the boiler like this,
see, just 30. Avn" she suddenly cried
out. She had scalded her fingers.
1t was my turn now. "Please step
aside" said, going up to the table, 'let
me try. You will injure yourself worse
with your experimenting. Hand me
the water, Fannie; that's it, thank you,
dear! And now I'll light the lamp.
POUNDS, the stuff won't burnt"
1T is prepared non-infiammable alco-
hol for medicinal purposes" said father.
"Well, then, send for some that will
burn" I cried. out OF patience, after l
had wasted dozen or 30 matches in the
vain attempt to ignite the lamp.
II know what am going to do. /
am going to sacrifice my bottle of eau
de cologne" Fannie exclaimed, mag
unanimously, what is the difference!"
She ran off and pretty soon returned
with the odorous fluid, emptying it into
the lamp after. l had poured out the
'medicated" alcohol.
The cologne burned all right, and
pretty soon low, melodious singing
could be heard, showing that the ma
chine was beginning to do its work.
My wife's countenance was all aglow.
Now she was happy, only father looked
still anxious-lil<e and worried.
"Children, better not go near it," he
admonished, ''only yesterday three lit
tie girls were terribly scalded, you
know"
Pretty soon the steam seethed inside
the machine, the cover fell upon the
L l. IL \