davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14

tho NASiSioSs vi COlutncUCelntut
week will take place in the following
order:
SUNDAY, June l4th.
1890 a. IN. Baccalaureate Sermon
by Pres. j. II. Dimm, ID. ID.
7:3O p. IN. Address to Y. VI. G.. a.
by Rev. G. f. Walter A. W., of
Hughesville, Pa.
MONDAY, June 18th.
300 Examination of the college
classes completed.
1870 Meeting of the Board of Di-
rectors.
TUESDAY, June 18th.
lO'3O II. IN. Graduating Exercises
OF the Theological Department.
1870 p. IN. Address to the Alumni
of the Theological Department.
900 p. m. Philo Reception in the
Town Hall.
900 p. IN. Clio Reunion in tho So
ciety's Hall.
WEDNESDAY, June l7th.
300 II. IN. Business meeting of the
Collegiate Alumni.
1890 a. III. Annual Junior prize
oratorical contest.
2:3Op. m. Entertainment by stu.
dents i'll the campus speakers. Phi
loss. n. Carpenter and B. A. Metz.
ger. Clios-L. G. Hassinger and II.
&. Michael.
1870 p. IN. Address to Alumni Col
legiate department by Rev. II. G..
Bannen, A. NJ, of Williamsport, Pa.
900 p. III. Banquet of Collegiate
Alumni
THURSDAY, June 18th.
l0:30 q. M. Commencement.
SUMNER VACATION.
Sept. 1st. Observation-Disclosures
for admi
6 Z 2 "h"""1ay First
~. as as "op.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14

J.L. Marks has moved his res
idence. 1t is now between the rail
road and Ulsh's mill. You can To-
cate it by a platform in front of it,.
The platform has three planks in it.,
all different. One is high tariff
plank. one tariff reform plank, one
a silver l6 to / plank. You can still
get that good old all rye whiskey all
the same. BLAST.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
..,. .,. IOI OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES. S.Db so.
STATE OF PENNSYLVANIA
SNYDER cot NrI. -.
Our Clubbing List.

We have made arrangements with
a number of newspapers to club
them at reduced rates in connection
with the PosT The figures in the
first column represent the regular
G of the paper and = he second
mn is the that pape'
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
Kid Gloves reduced at Libbie
n,nk barrar'o mill; m a,y ot to,o

Kid Gloves reduced at Libbie
Dunkelberger's millinery store.
A wreck occurred near Duncannon
on Saturday and number of
through trains were run over the
Lewistown Division.
Rev. Gable. presiding elder Of U.
B. conference, was in town on Fri
day and Saturday OF last week. the
guest of Rev. Buddinger.
DR.. NJ. Salm's agent Was here
Wednesday distributing important
literature telling Of the doctors
next visit. which will be on May 10,
when all who are afflicted may se-
cure relief by calling on him at
the Washington House.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
Memorial Day Program

At regular meeting of Capt. G..
w. Ryan Post, of Penna., G. \. r.,
the following program was adopted:
Memorial services by the Post at
PaXtonville mt 900 n. III. and at Has
singers at 1880 a. m, assisted by
the Sabbath schools and citizens.
Services ut Meiser's grave yard by
Camp No. 80, p. O. $. of A. at 900
II. m, assisted by the Sabbath schools
and citizens. There will be meet
ing of Capt. G. w. Ryan Post at 1870
p. IN. in Post room. All comrades are
requested to be present as matters
of importance to all comrades will be
discussed. Memorial services at
Middleburgh at $50 p. III. sharp by
Capt. q. W. Ryan Post, Camp 5l5 p.
o. $. of A., the Sabbath schools and
citizens. Music by Stetlers Cornet
Band. Comrades at Fremont and
Centreville will decorate the graves
at their respective places assisted by
the Sabbath schools and citizens.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
Base Ball Saturday

The strong Dickinson College
team will meet Bucknell on the Col
lege Campus, Lewisburg, Saturday
afternoon. Dickinson usually pre-
sents a good base ball team and the
one this year is not inferior to those
of previous years. The lovers of the
national sport will see good game.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
IARGEPRIZES AGAIN
Our Former Prize Offers are
Totally Eclipsed by the
Shadows of the Dawn
ing Prizes.
The POST II Alive to the Educational
Interests OF thc Rising Generation.
ana Three Scholarships Rt Sus-
guchnnna University viii he
Awarded to those receiving
the Highest Number OF
Votes.

The Posr is determined to lead
not only in journalistic enterprise
and industrial development but also
in educational advancement. On
two former occasions the Posr gave
large prizes Of scholarships to teach
ers and prospective teachers. The
first was won by c. w. Smith, then
teacher of this borough. The
second offer consisted of two prizes
and were won by A. w. Gill of Mid
dleswarth aud w. |. Xechman of
Troxelville. These scholarships were
given at Bloomsbury State Normal
School. and were designed especial
ly for teachers and those preparing
to teach.
Susquehanna University is well
known by many Of our readers TO be
n college of the highest standing.
The scholarships to be given away
are good for the study of Latin,
Greek, Mathematics, science and
every branch needed for u full col
lege course or a preparation for
any class to which the winner by
previous preparation is itted to en-
tor. These scholarships are design.
cd to go farther than those offered be
fore which were only for teachers.
The scholarships Mt Susquehanna
j "arsity arc not for
~
teach, those preparing for college,
those going to college aud those
for commercial life. The
usefulness of these prizes has thus
been broadened and made medium
of great value to all who are fortu-
nate enough to win one Of these
great scholarship prizes. The con
test is open to everybody. There
will be no limitations except those
who have won prizes from the PosT
before. Here is a splendid oppor-
tunity for any one to get start on
an educationa! career. In this con-
test there will be three chances to
win prizes and the three persons
who show by their diligence aud per-
severance that they are most entitled
to the prizes will be the winners.
The full particulars are given on ed
ltorial page of this issue. The con
ditions of the contest are
practically the same as last sum
mer's contest, only greater induce
ments are offered for new subscri-
bers and for advance payments. We
will give reward i'll premium
coupons for Job work and advertise
ments secured for the PosT.
These are the largest prizes ever
offered by any country newspaper
and we will welcome all young peo-
pie who are anxious to educate them
selves.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
MIDDLEBURGH, SNYDER CO., PA, MAY IA 1896


Capt. J. V. Miller and Miss Wilson
of Lewisburg drove to our town last
Wednesday. q
No other preparation so meets tho
wants of debilitated system b
Ayers Sarsaparilla. -
G.. G. Driesbach OF Mifflinbura
passed through town last week en-
route for Altoona. Z,
Every year increases the populU{
ity of Ayers Cherry Pectoral for all
pulmonary troubles.
Miss Laura Runkel last week was
the guest of her sister, Mrs. DR. Ar.
lison, at Northumberland.
DIR. Lester Schoch OF Shamolin
enjoyed the hospitality of DIR. @. E.
Hassinger for several days.
Mrs. r. b. Hummel and Miss Meta
Meyer of Selinsgrove were visitinR
friends at this place last Thu lay.
Mrs. William L. Smith and augh-
ter, Annie, of Millmont were Sny-
der county's capitol last Thu day.
Jerome Garman and da, liter,
Nora, of Red Bank visited T.
Garman and III. II. Bickhart $, lay.
Miss Miriam Orwig and ne ,w,
Brice Harter, spent last TIL, lay
with James Magee and sis at
Kreamer. e.
Eighty-fve of the one h, ed
and eight school directors offs Ter
county were present at the &C en-
ton last week.
Fss"les P'bighaus and 81, :s.
Julia and Al Niffiinburg = ge
entertained Moatz anc a.
lily last Sat
j. How of Selins,
rode on TO Adams
Sunday a ,ff herefo1 T..
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14

SPECIAL COMBINATIONS.
a. We will send the n. Y. Weekly
Iribune, The Boston Trayeier
(twice n week and the Posr all one
year (this makes four papers every
week for only two dollars.
CO. We will send the Farm Ne,rs,
monthlv), lYomdnkjnd, monthly,
The y. y. Iribune Tor the Boston
TrdrelerD and the Posr all one year
for only two Dollars. If.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
Attention Ladies'.

Twill be mt Hartman's Hotel in
Centreville next week from six
o'clock Wednesday evening to eight
o'clock Thursday evening, May 2lst.
/ will have with me a full line of
Ladies' Misses and Children's 8
Trimmed Hats, Boys Hats and
Baby Caps. Do not fail to call to
see my goods whether you intend to
buy or not.
LIBBrE DUSKELBERGER,
Middleburgh Milliner.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
BANK STATEMENT.

Report OF the Condition of the First National
Bank NJ Mddcburgh at Middlcburgh, I'm the
state ~ Pennsylvania. al the close Of business
May - 1896
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
HOWN TOPICS.

Chile Among You Takin'
and Faith he Prints EN-
po,uInce FITTING To and
xcws n. cleaned from MI
e.orLife md Printed for
.rmntion Of Readers.
e prize offer.
Ascension Day.
bng the county fair. Sub
brally.
paneler went to Lewis
+ tuesday.
kckenburg was a caller at
last Thursday.
ll be the lucky winners OF
rship prizes
|mith is having a 80. barrel
g on his premises.
J. Nye of Scranton, an oc-
At the Central Hotel.
lite Teachers Association
at Bloomsbury July 10.
frederick Bower has gone to
bhia to spend a few days.
kaudenslager of Selinsgrove
Ierauted an original pension.
i Rote Of Mifilinburg was
Ito Middleburg on Sunday.
Eerbster and wife of Penns
he in Middleburg Sunday.
Nj. Miller of Beavertown
county capital on Mon
want Job printing of all
at right prices, come to
~-'~o~ Irsr aud A "
of Meiservllle were In
day.
*. Bowersox last week Wis
ster, Mrs. John Miller, at |
e.
)hner's hos % in Chapman
Ess destroyed by fire on
Feek ago.
} cows off the street or
be locked up. BY order
y burgess.
nrg is well represented at
school Convention at |
& this week.
lrman, one of Fremont's
g business men, made u
office Monday.
dred Dollars worth of !
be given away. Read the |
elsewhere in this issue.
pyder, the insurance man |
rove, ana DIR. Potteiger |
county seat on Monday.
n believes in educating
ID hence 5000 worth of
y s will again be given
plenty of chance to win
ese magnificent prizes.
hree to win. Get in the
mmel, the new Justice of
at Globe Mills, was in
eek and lifted his COM
leased to state that j. L.
ech, which had been eff
is late stroke, is rapidly
pr G. Romig of Fremont
pugh town Saturday on
New Berlin to the U. b.
ner, clerk in the Gus
OF Philadelphia, and
'tler were county seat
~.
YER bought the farm
'ersox about 8 miles
own. The price paid
% acres.
4 of Selinsgrove and
OF Chapman were
n ension through G. w.
y heir attorney. |
N seller Of Selinsgrove,
III man for Artman and
M dsiphia. interviewed
H0vn Mo- A.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14

Max Boversox of Penns Creek
was Middleburgh visitor on Satur-
day.
The statement of the First Ma
tional Bank will be found elsewhe ere
in his issue.
lace Curtains 81 yds. long, II yds.
wide ut Sl.0O per pair at Dunkel-
berger's Millinery Store.
Education forms the basis for the
elevation of mankind. That is why
We give away SCHOLARSHIP $.
"a. Abel Winey and daughter
and AIRS. Aigler of Beavertown we're
visitors in town on Friday.
We are indebted to W. A. Basom
OF Blacksburg, S. G. for two pictures
of the Wild Man of South Carolina
and his house, rs described in Prof.
Brosius' letter in this issue.
John II. Beigh Of Liverpool was
released from Jail on Friday morning.
Simon Long of Freeburg gave bail
in the sum of $500 for him to keep
the peace on the strength of which
be was released.
George frank Grimm last We'd
nesday received the degree of Bach.
elor of Arts at Gallaudet College,
sp "a: INV % ~ Tb 4 poar a..
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
RESOURCES.

Nib''Ot INNT4D.
Loans and discounts. ts............... tgi e7qe
DNe'uiMls' secured and unsrCurcd.... lass
I. ;. Bonds To secure Circulatiu iut....,.. is nUul
Premiums on L. :. Bonds.
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. hI furniture aud nyturcs iLo5aIa
Que rom National Banks mot Reserve
Que from state BANK, aud bankers .... i,is3M
Due from approved reserve agents.. ~ ,GG S-
thccks aud other cash items .......... 9i Sc
Notes Of other National Binks......
Fractional paper currency .nicklcs, aud
LAWFUL MOSEY Rg,LRyF IN ham
VIZ:
Specie ................. p,62LnN
LGSl,,end@r notes 't'ooo io95,Uo
% per cent OF clrculJtluu)...... 6It.uI
ToTAL..".................. igo65,5.o;
LIABILITIES.
Capita stock paid s5nooonn
9SlrRig,I Fund i5OOOj
Undivided profits lcss expense, ana
. taxes pud Observation-Disclosures. 837l.4i
National Bank notes outstandluS....... n SnI"i
que TO other National btnkS.......... ,,2ip6h
Due 10 state Banks and Bunkcr,...... Y3fI
individual deposits subject
Demand certificates Of de-. '''' ''''''
Notes ani lIis rcIlscoGn,ci. .......... ~ ''1''
STATE OF rETNSYLvNIiN.ii ''''' '''''''''0'
SNYDER COUNTY, -.
l. j. y. THOMPSON Jr.. Cl,hlcrof the above
named bank. 10 >olrmuy swear that the above
statement is tru" % the best of my knowledge
and belief
j. y. THOMPSON. Jr.. Cashier.
Sln,',I.ord s,.., AMI sworn to before me this isth
,,..... -. wEINER, notary purllc.
\ KREEGER
". ". WtrrENMNER,
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14

tends congratulations to our young
friend
Don't place your order for buggy
until you see the Safety buggy man
ufactured by the Safety Buggy CO..
of Lancaster. A sample buggy can
be seen at my livery stable near the
Washington House.
If. w. II. JONES, Agent.
Lewistown will get the Division
Encampment of tho National
Guards. Over 5000 soldiers will en-
camp there July 10th. This will af-
ford treat to the people of this
vicinity who delight in witnessing
the execution of exact military
movements.
A smooth, easy shave, genteel
hair cut, or other tonsorial work. is
always obtained at Soles' Barber
Shop, in Wittenmyer's Building, op-
posite Post Office. Go to Soles and
you will make no mistake, Shaving
soap, face cream, hair oil and egg
shampoo for sale. A. f.. SoLEs.
A new time table will go into effect
ON May 18th on the Pennsylvania
Railroad. No important changes
will be made. There was rumor
afloat that n night train and a Sun.
day train would be run over the
Lewistown division. There is no
foundation for such report. The
rumor is false.
Any person desiring to purchase II
bicycle will do well to call on or
write to VonNeida and Hendricks,
Selinsgrove, Pa, who handle the
celebrated Phoenix bicycles. This
wheel has been on the market for
nine years. Quotations given on
any make of wheels on the mar
ket. If.
The bottling works at this place
Is dong big business. Seebold ~
Reigle, the proprietors, are receiving
orders every day and are filling them
to the great satisfaction of their pa
irons. These gentlemen are enter
prising business men and are eager
to meet every requirement Of their
trade.
Rev. Buddinger, Henry Reigle
and daughter Hattie. Joseph Clelan.
wife and son. Mrs. Hathaway Mertz.
Clara Splitter, Dora Bickhart, Anna
and Bertha Beaver, Laura Scham-
bach, F. M. Specht, Chas. Specht.
Frank Wenrich. Conrad Springer,
Reno Splitter, Luth. Walter and ].
j. Shelley attended the u. B. con-
ference at New Berlin on Saturday.
The Middleburgh post. [volume] (Middleburgh, Snyder Co., Pa.) 1883-1916, 1896-05-14
Commencement at Susquehanna Uni
versiy.

The exercises of commencement
week will take place in the following
order:
The record-union., 1896-11-22

noise Is something like the screeching
OF an ox-cart that has no grease on it,
and 1t is made by every truck on a train.
The track is perfectly safe, and as there
Is no curve at all the cause of the grind
ing and squeaking has mystified the
railroad people. Every effort has been
made to ascertain the cause of the diff
Guilty. The locomotives have been ex-
amlned, the coaches and cars have been
scrutinized. every cross-tie and every
rail has been inspected, every joint has
been looked at, and every foot of the
track has been regauged, but no ex-
planatlon could be found. The section
master has almost crawled over the six
miles on his knees In search of the
cause. The roadmaster has tried his
pest TO ferret out the matter, and the
superintendent has been over the road
ana inspected it-all of them making
repeated efforts time and again to find
out what is the matter-but they have
given II up as a bad job. They have not
only peen able to discover the cause of
the noise, but have been unable to dis
cover any theory to explain the mystery
IL Is one of the railroad mysteries of the
age, and has been going on for twenty
years. During that time the ss-ties
ana rails have been replaced several
tiines with new ones, but without eff
Iect.-St Louis Globe Democrat
The record-union., 1896-11-22
NapOleOn's Sword.

Ihe doomed church of the Val-de-
Grace in Paris has just received a cur
1ous addition to it's treasures in tho
shape of sword originally worn bv
Napoleon l. AT the close of a
bloody day the Emperor came unon
Baron Larrey. the famous military
surgeon, who was evidently in some
trouble. What is the matter p, he in
qulred. Sire" replied the Baron. 81
nave lost all my baggage, and, what is
more. my sword" Don't worry about
that, cried Napoleon; and unbucklfng
his own weapon he handed it to the
olsconsolate doctor. This precious relic
was bequeathed to Larrey the second
scarcely less eminent than his father,
and was preserved by him with relig-
lcus veneration. On his death a few
months ago 1T went with all his prop
erty to Mile. Dodu, his god-daughter
III the Legion of Honor, who distin-
guished herself by ambulance work in
the last war. Fearing lest it might fall
into less careful hands, she had 1t en-
closed in case and presented 1t to the
church. The priest In charge laid II
solemly on the altar, blessed it, and
hung 1T where 1t can be seen by All
The blade is finely engraved, and on
the gold hilt the following words are
Inscribed: "A. NJ. le Baron Larrev.
iEmpereur- SIT. James Gazette.
The record-union., 1896-11-22
BRIDGE HIS STEPPING-STONE
1t Was a Stumbling Stone, Though
to a Bishop.

The late Bishop Of Argyle and the
Isles, in Scotland, DR.. Mackarness, was
a. very large and heavy man, weighing
at least 21j pounds, says a contributor
to "Harper's Round Table
On one occasion, accompanied by his
chaplain, Ch1nnery Haldane, he was
making his way through the mount
aims to confirm some children in a far
away village.
The carriage, drawn by strong and
agile mountain ponies. slowly ascend
ing through rocky pass, was sudden
ly brought to a standstill by a fallen
tree. The Highland driver did all he
could to get by the obstacle, but finally
had to go for assistance. The bishop
and his chaplain strolled on.
Now, the chaplain wanted to be
made a rural dean, and he thought
this an excellent opportunity to try the
Bishop on the subject. The weather
was fine, the view delightful, the Bish-
op apparently in good temper. Why
not breach this subject SO near to his
heart? The Bishop heard his request,
but instead of answering him stopped
and called attention to the effect of
the sun on the distant mountains.
Further hints were met in the same
way.
The village was now in sight, but
an unlooked-for obstacle presented it
self. The little stream, crossed usual
ly a picturesque bridge, had been SO
swollen by the rains that the bridge
appeared like an island in the mid
die
Here was quandary. 1t might be
hnf b,a
rived, and night was coming on.
What are we to do?" said the Bish-
op.
MY lord" replied the chaplain, eff
you will get on my back / will carry
you to the bridge
The Bishop demurred spoke of his
weight and the undignified appearance
he would present. But the chaplain was
strong, and finally persuaded him.
When fairly In the middle he came to
a full stop.
Are you tired, Haldane?" said the
Bishop.
NO, my lord, I am not tired; but
I wish to speak to you about the rural
deanery.'
but, my dear fellow" cried the
Bishop. in alarm, this is no place to
talk; wait till we get to the other side. "
''On the contrary, my lord. I think
this is an excellent place to talk. for
if you refuse me l shall drop YOU"
THE Bishop tried to temporize; but
the chaplain was immovable.
THE rural deanery or down you go?"
was the fiat, and reluctantly the Bishop
gave the chaplain his promise.
He kept his promise, too, and after
the death of DR.. Mackardness that
same chaplain and rural dean became
his successor, and is now Bishop Of
Argyle and the Isles
The record-union., 1896-11-22
WORDS BORN IN NEW YORK.
"Porterhouse" Steak Originated in
Burling Slip.

New York City is the birthplace Of sew
eral expressions that have been for
many years current all over the world.
These expressions are not the outcome
of scholarly thought and culture. AL
though our professional men have duti-
fully and generously aided in the eircu-
la ton and ennoblement of neologisms
foreign born, the apt yet unstudied Of
ferings of the untutored workman have
held their own in literature as well as in
everyday speech, while many labored
results Of learned mind workers and
would be mind masters of words have
lived but long enough to be named, says
writer in "Harper's Weekly"
The word boss" which came into
common use during the regime of Will
i'm M. Tweed, is the Dutch baas-mas-
ter In the language to which it be-
longs it is much used in composition.
Thus, zimmerman baas is master
carpenter, and preacher is in Dutch
merely church boss.
Only few years ago attention began
to be called to the prevalence of the
various forms Of vice in what was then
considered the choicest residential part
Of the city. A newspaper reporter named
the region the "Tenderloin district" and
as such it is destined to be known for a
long time to come, while the name ten
derloin will do duty similarly in other
towns as they grow more like the city
in their notable characteristics
Porter is the name given in London
more than a century ago to a very dark
and heavy beer much fancied by porters
and other outdoor workmen. The word
and the thing came to. New York in due
time, and the porter was soon in de-
mand as beverage among the wharf
men, truckmen and longshoremen en-
gagged on the river fronts of the east
and west sides of the city. One tav-
erner in Burling slip became famous for
the porter he sold, and his place grad
ually gained the distinction Of being the
porter house of the town. In course of
time he added all the facilities of hotel
to his public" and increased it's repu-
tation by furnishing his customers a
steak such as they could get nowhere
else They called 1t the ''porterhouse
steak" and by that name a particularly
choice cut Of the steak part OF a steer IS
known everywhere.
The record-union., 1896-11-22
Bill of Particulars.

Good Minister Ito a man wishing to
be married)-Do you wish to marry this
woman?
Mani do
Minister-Do you wish to marry this
man?
Woman-I do.
Minister-Do you like the city as a
place of residence?
Man-No; I prefer the suburbs.
Minister-Do you like the suburbs?
Woman-No. indeed; 1 prefer the
city
Minister-Are you a vegetarian in
diet?
Man-No; I hate vegetables. I live
on beef.
Foman-I can't bear meat. am a
vegetarian.
Minister-Do you like a sleepina-
room well ventilated?
Man-Yes; l want the window awav
down, summer and winter.
Minister-Do you like so ro,1oh fres,
air?
Woman-No; it would kill me, T
want all windows closed.
Minister-Do you like a light in the
room?
Man-No; can't sleep with a light:
want the room dark.
M1nlster-Are you afraid of the dark .
Woman-1ndeed. am. 1 always have
a bright light in the room.
Mlnister-Do you like many bed
clothes?
Man-All I can pile on.
Minister-Do you?
Womna-No; they suffocate me.
Mlnlster-I hereby pronounce Won
man and wife and may the Lord have
mercy on your souls.-New York
Weekly.