The morning times., 1896-03-22
SLYMPKINS' REVENGE.

until was out or breath, and still he did
not come.
II you want to know who am allow
| me TO inform you that any name is George
| Boomerang, better known in Frazedona,
where 1 reside, as Capt. Boomerang, late
/ or the army. 1 am a man OF considerable
wealth, own the finest house In town aud
| keep, or did keep, man by the name of
| Sam, whose duty it was TO brush my
| clothes, hat and boots and adjust my leg.
| / refer 10 wooden leg. The original
| leg ran against a cannon ball during our
| late uupieasaEtness, and have never seen
| It siuce.
| Well, lt was Sans duty to take that
| wooden leg orr at night and TO be ON hand
| in the morning TO put It on before got out
| OF bed, acd now you know " hy was yell
| lug, san! SAM SAM
And when inform you that this was the
morning 0fmy weddIng & day perhaps you can
/ imagine hOW anxious 1 was TO get onto my
/ legs as soon as possible.
| Yes, ma'am. 1 was sne lucky fellow that
| had wake d INTO he affections on a wooden
/ leg, ioo-of the bandsomest girl IN FFaze-
/ doua ard vas that ia to lead her TO the
altar. But must get my leg on first, and.
as sam wouldn't or couldn't come, rolled
/ out or bed ard went hopping around 10 90
| on foot to find my leg.
| Now, my dear reader, when the sur
/ geOn trimmed my stump after that little
affair with the cannon ball. he sawed il
i Off uncomninniy short; so, perhaps, you
Can family imagine my feelings when,
after hopping around my room found
what / supposed TO be my leg but, upon
/ attempting to adjust 1t, discovered that
IL was intended to go on below my knee
do wooden legs shTink?-that's Just
| what / want 10 know SAID l. And then
| rang the bell and called SAM
arH e.H did
hoUsekeeper. Mrs Bloom, did.
Mrs. Bloom ] cried, where is Sam?''
She answered me through the keyhOle
| OF the door. He left last night about
II O'clOck-took his trunk with him, and
sad he Was gong to leave town b the mid
I night train"
/ couldn't understand it at first I had
| always used sam well, paid hun good
I wa ges, and ne had seemed perfectly con-
| tented with his situation, and served me
faithfully until now.
Suddenly an idea struck me, and the
| whole cause Of Saul's perfidy was revealed
| TO me.
BY heavens. - Is sIympkils!' I yelled.
! "SlympkinS is the cause Of all my woe.
He bFibed sam to steal my leg on this,
my wedding day, and leave this insuft-
| Gent prop IN place OF IL. y
Jim slympkins is or was my rival. He
! is Che only son of his father who, BY the
! way, IS the most wealthy gentleman In
| Frazedona. Consequently, Jim doesn't 90
anything but smoke cigars, drive around
town behind his splendid groys, and de-
vote himself TO the ladies geheraly.
1 rather had the advantage OF Slymp-
I kins- To be sure, Slympkins mad, or was
expecting 20 have. much more wealth than
could boast OF, but hadn't my face, you
/ know, or anything like it.
/ was sorry for SIympkins, but hang it,
"a u rT
had CHOSEN Miss Short, Miss GinX, Miss
. Broad. or, in fact, any one bat Miss Amelia
Seymour il would have been we'll But IL
I was really absurd for SlympkiEs 10 suppose
thai / would allow him or any other man 10
marry Amelid-at least, while l had q
/ wooden leg.
/ / would have given sIympkins anything
i'll reason, but It was truly ridiculous for
him To think that l would give him Amelia.
/ 1 told her SO. and then / folded her to my
/ breast and she folded me 20 her breast,
ana l allowed her to sip the honey from my
ruby lips.
Us. / lad won her, and poor -sIymp.
! EMs was fairly wild with rage. he haC
/ sworn 20 lie TeyenScd, but 1 i@usned al
i VAS seated at the brea kfast table
| SHINING nv coffee half an hour 3IteFWard1
| when Mrs Bloom came running in crying.
"oh! Captain, know ali about it.'
| what, the legf
LlfLh So NJ N4s2l t-4ltt A-i-A1A
sfys she saw Mr.. Slympkins give sam
! some money last night
| Yes, / know 10 was SlycnP klnS-
! More !s.I tuaJ, sam WaS married last
night 20 Mss SeymCuT'S maid arc they
I went OF LCzttEeF by the Il o clCc X train
| .'BIt, my dear woman, said j, Il
! don't care anything about W4Cu ne mar
! Flet or wnerr be nus gone tHe 4ltsuO8
is, has be carried my leg WIsh hlme'
/ why, I'm sure l don't kEOT-
''We1, that is Just what want 10
-n Fs rzT'H - m
I fling You must remember that I II 10
uc married today, and, 0y JOFe, l want
- cont you ask s!ympkins for
Yes, and he Eaughed at No, I don't
intend 10 ct lin know anything about
/ tie trouble he has caused me Besides,
! l don't know that he hHs gCt it
But what are you going TO co.!
/ why, JHst as Sooa as l Ilnlsh ny
/ breakfast / SEaH 20 70 Alr- seymour 5
| and tel nm or the Eerfidy OF my servant
| (and / Si.aH take that leg TO prove my
/ statement, and unless he objects very
I upon crutoheS rather than 70 have the
/ wedding 20 tpOESd- That would please
/ SIynpknS TOO much. It's what he ex-
/ pSctS, Dut / II diSappOint him, by JOveP'
l finished my coffee, and, going 70 my
/ chamber, / took the OWaCrIeSS leg and
| wrapped il up III paper. Then / cam down,
| and. ordering my carriage, rode out TO Mr.
/ seymour 5 residence.
| The old gentleman met NE at the door
I He took no notice of my CTutCheS. With
/ aVerted face he bdde me good morning and
/ led me into the parlOF.
| I'm sorry, Capt. Boomerang, very sOTry,
but the wedding VIII have to be post
pOned."
I for you see l thought he had already heard
I OF my loss
/ Amelia is"
What my dear AmeliaI on, has any
! thing happened TO her? Is she il2''
''lJ's nOJhing serious my dear captain"
/ But Is she III? Oh where IS she? Let
me 30 10 her. Do let me see her
| shes in her bOudOjr. GO, perhaps you
I can comfort her.
1 did 90. I burst into the room and
I foHnl ner lying on the sofa.
/ I rushed forward 70 clasp her in my
/ arms. bar Tecoiled In surprise and amaze
Z ment when | saw upon the chair in front
! Of The lounge upon which she was lying
"tireat heavensl Amelia. where-,iid YOU
get my leg?'' For, you see, / recognized
: lne limb instantly.
The Ie-oh, george Henry. II can never
be your WIFE," she SObhed. fixing her
/ liquid O-bS on the limb before her.
But where did you gee my leg?' / re-
[ iterGtet at The same tune unfolding the
paper from the short one l lad brought
where did YOU get nine?'' she screamed,
l hopping up from the lounge and clUChlnG
I tCc nmD thatI still held N my hand
"YourS!T' l gasped'
'.On! this is too muchr'
| Amelia sat down, too, AMI for about Two
inmates we Eazed into one anOther's faces
/ without Spea8 king q word. At last spoke
"Oh! Amelia, SIympkins has played a
! cruel Joke upon usl He bribed your mdid
{ and my man 10 change these limbs
I Yes and now"
But luckily. we have found il out in time.
and now the wedding can so on, as II moth
! ing had happened"
! Nv hat. would you marry me uOw?''
i NOW i cried, CtaSDtlE fltsF 10 nv FclSt,