Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1896-07-01
THEIR HONEYMOON.
CAME PRETTY NEAR STARVING DUR
ING ITS FIRST WEEK.

Was Too Much For Them, and Hun9er
Drove Them to Light Housekeeping"
Starving amid plenty is q hard fate,
yet such was the case Of a diffident
bridal couple that staid for week at
the Hotel Netherland recently. They
came up from the south, and the period
Of reconstruction did not seem to have
left a mark upon their open and genial
characters He was rawboned and ath-
lceic, and shc was one Of those typical
southern girls who speak in the Ian
guorous dialect of Dixie Land when she
does speak, but carrie. ON conversation
mainly by the use Of her eyes. The cou-
pie were well supplied with money and
manifested desire to have good time,
but showed q woeful lack Of knowledge
of the details CT y great city. To the
manager Of the house the young bride
groom corfided the information that his
family had once been wealthy. but, like
many others in the south, had been
drained by the war. The girl also came
of an old plantation family that had
been left penniless by the war. and all
either could boast Of was q long lire Of
fino ancestry, health and good looks. By
dint of hard work and extreme economy
the bridegroom had saved a few hun
dred dollars, and he intended to have q
honeymoon that would be worthy of re-
membrance.
Tho couple came to tho hotel about
noon and passed most Of the afternoon
| In looking over the house and admiring
| the furnishings. When it began to grow
| dark, the young husband seemed to get
uneasy. He wandered around the cor
ridors Of the hotel and seemed to be at a
| loss for something. Finally his feelings
mastered him, and he approached the
clerk and asked: "Ah, say, can you tell
NE wLeu the supper bell rings? Am get
ting sort o. hungry"
Tho clerk was amused, but he ex-
planned to the southerner the mysteries
Of living upon the European plan. When
the bridegroom learned that the 81 u
day he was paying for his room did not
include meals for himself and his wife,
he whistled softly and remarked: You
all must max u heap Ct money cha 'ging
like that TO rooms. Well, we uns are
going to have good time, and I sup'cse
we all might rs we'll go in and get
something or other to eat"
He walked OFF and went up to his
room to get his wife. He manifested q
peculiar liking for the elevator and in
sisted On riding in it at every occasion.
He found his wife as hungry as himself.
and under the tow of a bellboy made his
way TO the dining room. Previous to en-
tcring this room his honeymoon had been
q dream of joy, without cloud to hide
the sunshine. When he seated himself
at the table the first rift in the lute'
came. 4 white aproned, obsequious
waiter laid q carte de jour in front Of
the southern visitors and then hurried
of to get glasses. plates and SO on. A
consultation ut once took place. The
card was printed in French. and after
studying il from every side and reading
it backward aud forward the husband
gave it up and passed il over ruefully to
his wife She looked in hopeless how'll
derincnt ut TIE card. and it was evident
that she was at sea also, SO far rs French
was concerned. They gaZed hopeicssly
into each CtEer's eyes and then at the
card, and then back into each others
eyes again. He was game to the last,
and suddenly q thought struck him. He
called the waiter to him and raid softly.
"Waitah. IS this all yol uns have foI
suppah?'
The waiter replied that everything
that had been prepared for the meal was
on the card. The husband sighed and
the wife looked glum Then the young
fellow said quietly: ''Well, guess we
all don't want any Of what ycu uns have
got fixed. We uns viii get something or
other to eat later" Then he aroso and
went up to his room, his wife following
obcdicrtly. For two days the young con-
pie haunted the house. They did not
seem to think that there was any more
of New York than that which lay i'm
mediately within the range Of vision
from the hotel. They eyed the dining
room longinSlv, but did not enter it.
One day ciie Of the rlaiis came to the
manager Of the hotel and told him that
the persons in the room occupied ty this
young couple were littering the place
with cooking. The manager, who felt
that something was wrong with the
young fellow, called him aside and told
him kindly that the management did
not allow cooking III the rooins. rs it in
terfered with the regime Of the house
and damaged the furniture. Tho yoUnS
man blurted out: ''Ah don't see what
we all is to do, then. All can't get any
thing to eat in the dining room, and we
uns has get TO eat"
When pressed for an explanation. he
explained the trouble about the bill Of
fare, and confided to the manager that
| he and his wife had finally grown SO
| hungry that he slipped over to q corner
store and got some vegetables and other
eatables and n frying pan. The couple
had used tho gas jet for a stove, and
managed to get along pretty well, al
| though he admitted that it was q rather
poor makcshift. The manager explained
| the intricacies of a French carte de jour
| to him, and also gave him q broade-
| idea Of the city's resources. The young
fellow was deeply grateful. and for the
| remaining few days that the couple
were in the city they entered the dining
room with the air Of persons who knew
all about it, and ordered the waiter to
get them something to eat. They
branched ont over the city also, and paid
| visits to various points Of interest AS
he was leaving the hotel. the husband
grasped the manager by the hand aud
said feelingly: ''Ah'm 'bliged to you,
sab. A person who don't ask questions
should starve, and we uns came prett,'
near it. New York Tribune.
A TRUE FISH STORY.
Don't Read 1t II You Are Not Prepared
to Believe II.
We give every one fair warning that
this is fish story. More than that, it