Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, 1896-12-07
UNABLE TO FIND JOHN JONES.
Plenty of Him, but the Particulars One
Wanted is Missing.


Chief Sigwart received a letter from. a
woman signing the name of Mrs. b. o'Mal-
ley, dated at Minneapolis Mimi, in which
it was requested that he furnish her call the
addresses of people in Omaha named Jones'
There are several chapters of the Jones fam
lily in the city directory and compliance
with the request proved something of a job.
The letter rccites that a brother of the
writer's, named John Jones, has been absent
from his home, which was formerly located
in Boston, for twenty-seven years. Word hed
lately been received by his relatives that
John was sick and dragging out miserable
existence somewhere in this city.
Providing himself with hack and a short
hand man in order that names and addresses
might be taken with rapidity Frank King,
secretary to Chief Sigwart, started out on Il
tour of the city. A glance at the first page
of John Jones' in the directory made the
secretary dizzy at the magnitude of his job
There were people by the name of Jones in
every Imaginable walk of life. they ranged
from the day laborcr to the independently
wealthy. In desperation the secretary struck
upon a novel plan. He closed both eyes and
taking a pencil thrust it point downward
on the vast eXpanse of the Jones family. Ii
alighted upon the name of John Q. Jones
who resides at sixth and Martha.
Good enough. I'll probably strike John
Jones around the corner" said Mr.. King as
he gave the necessary directions to the
driver.
John O." proved to be a laborer in the
smelling works He had just arrived home
and was washing his face of its smutty cover
ing, out in the kitchen of his humble dwell
ing. When questioned by Mr.. King as to
his ancestors and more particularly in re-
gard to his health, John q. ga2ed at him In
mild amazement Thinking possibly that
this particular scion of the Jones family
might be hard of hearing the secretary raised
his voice and repeated the questions.
Then little girl came out of the inner
room and informed the city official that her
father was a Polander and did not under
stand English The neighbors called him
big John" to which the tax assessor added
the surname of Jones and thus the directory
man had found him.
From this point the wanderiIgs Of the sec
rotary leave but an indistinct impression upon
his memory A horseshoer, a brakeman, q
cigar maker and butcher were visited in rapid
succession. They lived at the four points
Of the compass. There were innumerablo
Jones mixed in between. yet every mans
first name was John and every one swore he
was enjoying good health. 1t was a most
thankless job, so thought the secretary.
There were just seventeen pages Of closely
written manuscript in the possession of the
shorthand man when Secretary King returned
from a fruitless search in the western out
skirts Of the city for the particular Jones
Upon reaching the Farnam street motor line
Il car Was SlaHulnS on the track.
do you know man named Jones living
around here?" asked King of the condue-
tor.
Certainly" replied the motorman and
conductor in one voice.
us he sick?" asked the weary official
'Yn" bet he is.' replied the con" -
you don't believe it go over and see."
Following directions the secretary located
little shack with a detected piece of stove
pipe sticking out Of one corner down at the
foot of the street, in an angle Of the rail-
road tracks.
A knock brought no response, a second one
ditto, and thinking possibly that poor Jones
was too weak to talk the secretary pushed
open the door. dense blacNness was all
thst could be discerned at first, yet as he
gazed two black balls of fire slowly took form
in the rear Of the shanty and glared at the
intruder.
as your name Jones?" timidy inquired the
man in the door.
You bet it is pard. l am the original
Jones' and this is my busy day." said the
owner of the eyes, which by this time had
shown themselves to be located in a bundle
of rags standing upright upon a low bed.
The bundle had broom and was making
wild sweeps at an imaginary foe. "Wough!
There gees a big one" shrieked Jones
There's another, Whoopee! Here comes
whole job lot!' he howled and, hurting his
weapon into the corner, he climbed the back
the shack with the agility of a squirrel.
whats the m2tter?"
"Snakesr yelled the invalid Jones' "Mil-
lions of EN-! jump and rum" and his teeth
chartered as he beckoned his visitors away.
well. guess it's no USE" said .he sec
rotary to his assistant. This is the last one
on the list and he's got the jimjlms." The
present address Of John Jones who formerly
lived in Boston. is still yelled in mystery So
the notice are pOncarnOI