The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-19
THE wOODEN-LEGGED GOOSE.
How RawsOn Told the story Under
Difficulties.


Difficulties.
"Eh-yah! 1t shore takes all brands of
people to fill up a world" remarked Al
kali Ike. in a reminiscent way to the in
| curing and credulous tourist, who had
been lavish with his cigars and other
things good for man, in establishing an in
timacy with the festive Isaac. but reck-
on the quaintest an most original gent
that ever had the pleasure Of meetin up
with was Teller by the name of Rawson,
that used to be minglin' around in the set
Element, sorter casually referin' to his
wooden-legged goose story.
This yere Rawson never comes yere at
ali, that l know Of. He's jest yere an
sheok down an settled as if he has al
wers. been present, the first anybody is
aware of him. An his wooden-l legged goose
story is as much of a part of the town, the
first anybody notices il, as the public
square or the lynchin' tree is It never
dawns on us at all, but is ancient history
from the start, similar to some Old maids
you meet up with that pear to have been
born with spitty curls an pervadin' hor-
ror of the Tyrant Man.
Thar hain't no first time when the rest
Of us hears this yere tale Of hisn. 1t never
has no beginnin before the time that Raw
son is in the habit of sayin' that suthin'
or ruther sorter reminds him of that thar
wooden-legged goose story which every
/ IL
was a time when it wasn't fashionable to
answer him that we'd heard it,
1T got TO be a regular proverb in the
settlement. AS old as RawsOns wooden
| legged goose story was as much a stand
ard sayin' as Don't keer if dOr is all the
world over. The schoolmaster used to write
| 1t in the children'S copybOOkS, and the Rev.
| Jack Jonks used it. in his sermons occa-
sonally. 1t 'peared in the columns of the
| Clarion quite frequent. an in the courts
| every now an then, 1t was as much a
standard measurement of age as wrinkles
on a cows horn.
"Rawson alwers allowed it was old to
| everybody, an everybody agreed with
| him. An l am sanguine that it would
! have been gOin' on in the same way right
now if it hadn't been for tourist who
| poked up his head one day an asked
| how Rawson's woOden-legged goose story
| went, anyhow. He'd heard quite numer-
| ously about the story, an he wanted to
wal the man he asked about it said
| he'd forgotten 1t, an so did the next nine
| Then these yere ten men each asked sew
| eral Others about it, an every beggar of
| EN- had forgotten it, too. This started
| the inquiry, an it pervaded it's way clear
woman an child in the place had for,
gotten the story. Finally two honest men
| me an another feller-got together an
| one of us had ever heard it at all
and bime-by the fact was u n,
earthed that nary soul, large or
small, in the settlement had ever heard it.
| 1T 'peared that everybody had been ac-
! customer to believe that everybody else
| had heard 1t an had let it go at that rath-
! er than to pear to be so almighty far be-
! hind as not to know what was stale an
antique TO everybody else. Rawson was
| away at the time an before he got back
| the settlement had been ransacked an
/ shook up from potato hole to front porch
an right smart of the claim holders an
| farmers in the country had been raked
! over an it was settled that nobody from
| the least to the longest anywhurse fur
about of near had even heard the story.
| wal, when he comes back RaWson is
| welcomed like prodigal son, an the
| wooden-legged goose story is asked for
! He hens an haws around saws that ev-
erybody has heard it till they're tired and
! 1t is so old he's ashamed to tell il agin
| an so on. We keep pesticatin' with him
! IN hnally ne glts his back up and defines
| 10 tel the story any at all. Thar is a
! sayin that you can lead a boss to water
| but you can't sorter commence to make
/ him drink, an you may think it inDos-
! sible to make a man tell a story when he
| bows his neck an refuses TO recite it. But
/ we inquired some different, an after Raw
! son had pintedly swore he wouldn't tell
! of him.
"Acoordin', one Saturday night several
| prominent misunderstanding myself-es-
| corts this we're perverse an bull-headed
man out to the lynchin' tree an stands
him up on temporary constructed plat
| form, with the moose end Of a lariat
! around his neck an several able-bodied
! members of the reform committee at
| tdcneu 10 the other end. The word has
| gone round the settlement that Rawson
| is soin' to git off his jestly celebrated
! meteorological goose story, an everybody
| Is thar present similar TO feet shampe-
! ter.
THE event has been announced at the
close of school an the scholars is unani-
| mously thar Fond fathers brings their
! children, an dotin' mothers is present
with their infants in their arms Miss
! Gladys Mork rounds up her Sabbath
| school class, an Col. Handy Polk shappy-
| roam gang of personally conducted east
| ern tourists. The Rev. Jack Jonks is con
! spicuos, an four amiable gents brings
la poor sick man on his cot an locates
! him whur he can't fail to see an hear II
| all. Around the outskirts of the assem-
! blage the farmers wagons is drawed up,
| all OF EN- full to the brim, an everybody
| standin' up SOS not to miss any of it, 1t
| IS considered a valuable object lesson
| to great an small to behold the perdicky-
ment that obstinacy and bullheadedness
will git man into.
/ Col. Handy Polk steps forward an
makes a few appropriate remarks an
then announces that our friend, Mr.. Raw
| son. will now endeavor TO entertain US
with his famous wooden-legged goose
| story. But Rawsons rars back and de-
| clines to turn aw heel, let the chips fall
whur they happen to, as the Teller says.
" I've done proclaimed, repeated and fire.
/ quent, that l hain't a-goin' to tell no
wooden-legged goose story whatever"
| says he, IAN by the jumpin' gee-whilli-
| kins I'm man of my word! That thar
tale remains right whur it is att
! " on, l reckon you are Sorter labOrin
Rawson, says Col. Polk The vox Pop
| ul announces that Vnu are pon' TO tall