The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1896-11-26
TRIBUN Ell ).

erous and considerate as he was rich. Every
man in Northwestern Ohio can recall some in
stance of his kndliness OF heart. Years ago
contractor who was doing some work for him
fell into trouble and was in danger Of losing
his own home even. Unsolicited Foster went
to his assistance and helped him oat. The con-
tractor left Fosioria and went out Nest. NO
more was heard from him But it seems that
he went into mining. and became qnite wealthy.
Later he died, but be bad told his sons how
Foster had wed him, and when these heard
of Fosters misfortunes they quietly set aside
some stock in the smelling works they were
projecting for their fathers benefacior. They
said nothing about it TO anyone, bu; when their
smelling works became success and Fosters
share was worth S50, 600 they informed him OF
his property, and asked his disposition of it.
1t is very pretty story.
Chicago Record "Mr. Barclay is so well read;
he repeated on exquisite quotation last night
What was it?"
81 can't give you the exact words. but he
said he'd rather be something in something
than something else in something else"
Detroit Free Press Mr.. Black lock-Which oh
dem is de miehties in yo' opinion, Mistah Cut
ter--de pen er dc swode?
Mr. CuttaI-Well, in de fust place, rs nevah
been in de pen, an de secon' place, don't fink
de swode is in it wifi razzah.
Flieqende Blaetter: Critic-Where did you
get the idea Of that picture?
Painter--Out of my head.
Crtic-You must be glad that it is out.
Life. In Chicago: She-Bef / say yes,
want 10 ask you question.
He-Wbat is it, dear?
She--Do you believe in long marriages.
San Francisco Argonaut: Two impecunious
Scotsmen came upon a saloon. They had only
"saxpence between them, so they ordered one
nip o. whisky" They were besi.atimg who
shond have the first drink, when an acquaint-
ance joined them. Pretending that they had
just drank. one of them handed the new conner
the whisky, requesting him to join them in
drink. He drank, and. after few minutes OF
painful and silent suspense. said
Now, boys. you'll have one with me-"
"Wasna that weel managed, mon ?" said one
to his pal afterward.
cay. it was" said the other, solemnly; but
it was dreadful risk :"
"Willie Jones has the toughest luck of any
boy ever heard Of"
"Why?"
4, Il r. liz ~t,oa1
was letting out for vacation, and was laid up
with it all Summer. and now. just before
Thanksgiving. the doctor says he'll have to
operate on him for appendicitis"
"My! 1 sbouldn't think he would want to
live"
"You have met the latest newcomer; Jones is
his name. believe. What do you think of
him? Is he going to be- an addition to our
town."
Hes going to be an addition, certainly, but
like the additions we have been making on
the plat, he needs all sorts of improvements,
except supply of gas. Brought that with
him."
A number of cranks are dilating upon the
connection of % with Maj. McKinley's for
tunes So far they have found out that
The number of his regiment was %.
He succeeds the 23d President of the United
States.
He received the vote of % States.
x*x
new passenger elevator has been invented
from which great things are expected. 1t is
substantially broad belt, running at a gentle
inclination from one story to another. Upon
this the passenger steps and is carried up. The
belt is made of iron links, and covered with
corrugated rubber. Sprocket wheels furnish
the motive power. Such an elevator operated
at Coney Island last Summer carried 5000
passengers an hour, with ease. and with much
less steam-power than would have been re-
quired for an ordinary elevator. The new
elevator is expected to be of especial value at
railway terminal stations and elsewhere where
large crowds must go up down in short
time.
How was it that the Popocrat;c National
Com mittee did not avail itself OF the services
of those tireless talkers-Corbett aud Fizt-
simmons.
Since lubrcating oil has displaced tar on the
modern ship. the only pitch about the Navy is
that made by chopping seas.
IS
No, Mamie, the man who wrote Rocked in
the Cradle of the Deep" did not mean to beun-
derstood that somebody had showed him off the
dock and pelted him with stones while he was
in the water.
The whole length of street railways in the
United States aggregates about 5000 miles, or
five times the width of the country, and three
fifths the circumference OF the globe. Chicago
has the most-659 miles, and Boston next-55O
miles
When dog is chasing the chickens at the
other end of the lot woman may not be able
to hit him with a stone in an hours throwing.
But let him come into the house, and she will
crack him with broomstick every time with
neatness and dispatch and not endanger q tea
Gun or lamp chimney, where n man would
swipe down all the glass and china and miss
the cur.
$50 you want to marry my daughter? Do
you reflect what serious thing it will be to
marry her ?"