The morning times., 1896-08-02
WHAT THE CABB|E KNOWS
Familiar With the FrailtieS Of
the Human Race.
HE COULD TALE UNFOLD
Men Who Drive Vehicles al Night
Possess Many Secrets-Family
Honor in Their Keeping.

calnnSs would snake inc soCIdi iaoi"
from flagstaff to foundation. First are th'
doctors and second are the caomen.
While poets and rhymesters are bus!
iickering with quaint conceiis and with
lengthy cantos, immortaliziDg pet dogs
faithful servants, favorite horses and nu
mcrous other persons and things, they have
never once paid Il tribute to the humble cab
man. That Individual is often a blessing
Who that has ever been good fellow
and known the delights of a Boherni al
symposium, does not often bless the cabbi,
who brought him home n the cold gray OF
the morning and had the discretion to stop
u block away from the house, then assist
him the balance of the way on foot. find the
ever disappear NJ latch key and the equally
mysterious keyhoie, land him gently on Il
hail seat, and. with CHEEKY Good morn
ing steal softly away? And who is more
discreet than Cabbie? Further De 1t SAID
To his credit. he is honest, seldom taking
advantage of a tired, wine-beluddled pas
senger W hose feelings are not OF this earth.
CAN TELL CURIOUS STORIES
Cabmen can tell curious stories when
they have a mind to. The other night a
Times reporter, rdine in a surrey through
the country in the delicious cooiuess of a
night That had been cleared by heavy
storm, i'll conversation with The driver,
one of the oldest and most popular cabmeu
!n the city, had him relate some expe-
riences with Lis fares
"one evening"" he said.'I was summoned
to a house situated in the fashionable
quarter. 1 found my passengers were nus
band and wife. She was going 70 a re-
ception and he to his CUT. Sne told her
hubby he needn't MUD going all the way
with her, that she'd drop him at the
club, which she did.
When | turned my horses head in the
direction of the house where l supposed
her to be going, she whispered TO me
through the window: Don't go there;
drive 10 - mentioning the name OF
q swell cafe. OF course 1 went.
S'As / wheeled up to the sidewalk there
stood, evidently waiting, a Congressman
whom l knew well by sight. He helped
The lady to alight and they disappeared
IN the resta urant, where they remained for
an hour.
when the couple came out her face was
flushed and she spoke thickly. Neverthe-
ess she dismissed her escort and told me,
10 use her own words, to drive like the
1evil to the reception. Later in the even
ing the husband came, and l took them
both no ne.
NET BY THE HUSBAND.
Another time" continued the cabbie,
reflectively, between the puffs of a rather
composite cigar, Il carried home from a
river excursion the wife OF business
man III this town and one of his clerks.
The former gentleman was away from the
.i. q. nh ba wifi "A
racketed around quietly with her husbands
subordinate on the way back from the
boat l had great trouble in keeping the
lady from singing al the top Of her voice.
She also had a great desire to stick her
feet out Of the window
FINALLY the house was reached. The
Young man, who lacked strength in his
legs, had consider able difficulty getting his
Companion up the steps. She was withouta
key and they almost jerked the bell out OF
the socket. A last the door opened and
there, glowering in the entrance, stood the
husband. He had arrived in Washington
Oh late train from his trip You ought to
have seen the way that clerk was fired
OIL the pavement The next day the hus-
band sent FOR nae and Oh my promise never
tumentiont lea f,.I ppea me handsonely."
The cabnan told the reporter an inter
estiDg story about certain government Of
lIClll VII NHoIRlN IiOEe OF Ills type
writer than was compatible with his status
US q married man. His wife, cogniza mt Of
his infatua,ion, kept strict watch on all
his movements.
one afternoon this summer he had ar
ranged TO take his fair charmer out riding.
Knowing of his wife's close surveillance,
he concocted the following scheme:
BETRAYED BY a sNEEzE.
Tie Typewriter was TO go some distance
from the office, get n the closed carriage
be had engaged, and drive back to one OF
the side doors OF the department a half
hour before closing time.
AT this juncture,' said the cabman,
"he was 10 appear anu order me TO drive
TO the Capitol on some important business.
Ths, OF course, was bluff 10 tliro W off
his wire III case she made her appearance.
ana very CIpid, thin blur il was
added caOb!e disdanfuly. Il mad carried
bim SO many times | was familiar enough
10 tel him that and put him on to a better
plan, hut he cursed me, and tnl me me kneyy
more than a so-and-so hackdrivcr. i swal-
love a. ali, bat my turn c;t.ne. ana came
soon.
i drove to The door directed and waited
for him. Presently up walked a lady in
mourning, heavily ve-ied, and asked me r
] was engaged, reer.ng SGarpi y into the car
r:ase. | replied that l was.
who by she demanded.
Il told her l didn't know. / had been
telephoned for with Instructions to wait
for gentleman at The doof where my
SOupe was then StaiGine. just then the
typewriter snecZed. Quick as a flash the
other woulan thrust aside the curtains OF
The carriage and saw her rival. who had
shruIk back in one. corner.
- Gou hGssyi yelled the cnraEed woman
who was no ether than the wife CT the
Oh, At tis same time banging her rival
over the head with rarasol.
FACED AN ANGRY WIFE.
you'll go out riding with my hus-
band, VIII yoC?' WhackI Whack, We'll
I'll settle you,' and every word was ac-
companied by blow.
Il had great difficulty in pulling the
Indignant wife away. She was lvid with
anger. The typewriter jumped out the
other side of the carriage and vanished
running like the old boy WAS after her
TIE whole thing had occurred SO quickly
that the few pcopieiu the vicinity were not
aware OF what was happening.
After the wife had cooled down she
said, al the same tine handing me ST.,
Driver, 1 know whom you are waiting
for. 1 received an anonymous letter
ttilhg Hie an diout II, anu m going To
ge; In this cab and wait for that man
Il Offered no opposition, in the face of
tie greenback, and in she got, dra wing
the curtains. BY and by down the walk
came the typewriter's friend. lie had
sust been shaved, wore u rose IL bis but
,onhole, and strobe along with an air of
perfect happiness ard content. When lie
reached me he inquired softly:
Everything all right? Is she iusidc?'
g Yes, sir 1 replied, she's inside
and that was no Ne