The Caucasian. (Clinton, N.C.) 188?-1913, 1896-03-19
MACHINE POLITICS
ILLUSTRATED
4 Machine With Duplex Action
And One Motive
Power.
HOW THE OLD THING WORKS

HOW THE OLD THING works.
sesthsr. Ds.sesssse Party ssA sessA err
ksp.Sises. Psrsy wass.A - Iaiis -
Their Re- psssivs MseAiss BsGsss-
tIf this makes you mad II il intended for
you.)
Two bogy men firmly attached to
each other BY . horizontal pipe Joined
to their stomachs, are placed on pivot
so they will whirl easily around an up
right bar. One Of the bogy men 10 Ia
beled on his forehead in letters OF
brass 1.-THE National Democratic Par
ty." The other bogy man is labeled in
. similar manner THE National Re-
publican Party"
features and organization except the
label, for they both "belong to the
party" These words 1.-The party" the
trade mark Of the whole machine, are
printed in very large letters on the
crosswise piece at the top Of the per-
pendicular bar. The places where the
two bogy men are Joined are covered,
so that children and simple minded
people and party voters" who are
never allowed to 60 behind the scenes)
believe they are two separate men.
Great simpletOns believe them to be
actually alive, and would fight you il
you undertake to show them that they
were either dead or connected at the
stomach. In fact, once in four years
they are whirled SO rapidly around
each other and made to speak forth
abusive platforms, &C., by the accom-
plished ventriloquist who stands be-
hind them, that even fairly intelligent
men, in times of great excitement and
hubbub, actually believe that they are
not only alive, but separate also, living
separate existences, and actuated by
separate motives. But . most curious
working of this machine and one main
purpose Of its invention and operation
is yet to be disclosed. Many people
called "voters" 60 to look at the bOgy
men and there are many quarrels and
fights going on all the time over two
questions
1st. Whether or not they are joined
together (at the stomach.)
I'd. Whether or not they are dead.
What gives rise to these discussions
is that whenever q voter comes near
the ventriloquist operator begins to
persuade him that one or the other OF
the bogy men is trying to insult him
and that the other is his friend; and
true to this design, one of the bogy
men is all smiles for him, while the
other is threatening him for trying t
smile back at his wOOer. This goes OF
until the voter gets angry and hit
one of the bOgy men as hard As h
can, thereby causing the other bOgy t,
swing round against him with sucl
force as to knock him down. This i
done 50 quickly that observers diffe
as to which man struck him. In tn
melee that follows, the operator send
one of his assistants round to help tn
wounded man to his feet, and durin
this kindness, relieves him of hi
pocketbOOk containing the proceed
of his last years crop. The rage Of tn
wounded voter is 50 great that he doe
not miss his pOcketbOOk, or if he doe
|, he believes it was the "smiling villain
l who knocked him down that got il
for while others differ as to which on
struck him, he knows, for he felt tt
8 blow. As soon as he RECEIVERS suff
8 GENTLY for another fight, under til
a sanction and encouragement of b
q friends, he assumes an offensive att
! tude, rails back at the once smilln
but now insulting bogy, and as 500
as he gets In striking distance, bein
y also instigated by the other bogy,
.. deals the offender far more pOwe
Q full blow than he did bis former en-
my; being enraged too, on account
his being "betrayed" and "fOoled" ar
deceived" by the "smiling villai1
y who struck him before. He IS assiste
, in the same kindly way as before, ar
j. Of course relieved of his earnings
. the same sleight-of-hand. One of tn
s sort, after being knocked down a fe
9 times successfully by first one Al
Q then another of the bogy men, and b
9 ing always faithfully assisted and "r
@ lieved" by the same hand, begins
a suspect something, and goes off al
- sulks, says he will never have an
thing to do with politics. A few
this class, however, after they ha'
been knocked down several times, o
n casionally head a mob to pull dow
l. the whole machine. And, if tn,
n know too much of it's secret workins
20 and cannot be otherwise gotten rid I
Al they are taken behind the scenes al
- hushed up by giving them a part
: the profits. The great majority, no,
ever, 60 on all their lives alternate
u being knocked down for several yea
and then suIking several more. Som
times, from repeated and dangerO
le wounds, contagious and chronic di
l. ease breaks out on them called t
a. "sore head"
"a Another class of voters is even mo
q. simple than the ''alternater" just d
.. scribed. One of this class hits t
- same bogy man all the time, and alwa
D. regards the other as his friend. Sc
IS ing this simplicity, little pains a
taken to deceive him, and behind t
scenes he is the laughing stock
es those who prey upon his stupidit
re- He even prides himself upon the nul
"a Der of times he has been knock
~ down and then "stuck to his bogy'
" defeated" as he calls it. He often 50
ts he will stand by his bogy no mat,
~ what he does. One day when his sh
n was nearly torn off him by his fall
saw branded on his back the wor'
"straight ticket, D. P" in capital !,
or tiers. l rushed up to cover his shan
d. He got insulted and said he want
n everybody to see it in order that th
to might know which bogy "he belong
"a to-" He stated furthermore that
to as long as he lived.
Said his father and grandfather |
longed to it. asked him who put t
Ill brand on him. He said it was q fl
to lily mark, that his father and graz
ed father had it before him and W,
n proud of it. When 1 suggested IL
of the men who operated the bogy n
IL chine put this brand on him and
ancestors while they were stupef
from having been knocked down,
of order that they might know them
~ their property, be became insult
-. not at my suggestion of his beinI