davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The American guide., 1896-11-28

GoLLEY-"ls there ballroom IN this
hotelm Gadser-"les, sir; downstairs to
tho left, only we generally call II the bar IN
this part OF the country, Gazette,
The American guide., 1896-11-28

ryEre the smoke OF the q at and de-
cisive conflict has cleared away, prep
nrations have begun to resume work
In the mills and the factories and new
spirit Of enterprise md activity per-
yndcs the whole country. From all the
centers OF this country and Europe
comes the news that the result Of our
election has inspired confidence in
American honor and American credit.
---Toledr Commercial.
The American guide., 1896-11-28

Wngy bilious or costlyc, cat Cascaret,
candy cathartle, cure guaranteed, lOc, 25c.
The American guide., 1896-11-28

C'oyvIcT-"I'm IN here for having FIVE
wives Nisitor-"llow are you enjoying
yosr liberty yln-London Figaro.
The American guide., 1896-11-28

THis sorrow, which has cut down to tho
root, has come, not as spelling OF your
lie, but as preparation Tor it.-George
Eliot.
The American guide., 1896-11-28

PIso's Cure is q wonderful Cough medl-
clne.-MRs. W. PlcKERT, Van Siclen and
Blake Avcs., Brooklyn, N. Y, Oct. 20, 'ei.
The American guide., 1896-11-28

CAsolRErs stimulate liver, kidneys and
bowels. Never slohcn, weaken or gripe.
The American guide., 1896-11-28

JUsr try n 10c box of Cascarcts, the finest
liver and bowel regulator ever made.
The American guide., 1896-11-28
The Astronomy Of Lie.

When an as,fono-
mer forctclls the cx-
act minute ut which
two planets will crosa
zach other, we know
there IA no magic
about Il. The whole
nnlvcrac L rnYefnnd
The American guide., 1896-11-28

TAaLEIeu tfacetlously) VA man can al
ways dictate to his stenographer, you
know" Wugleigh-"Yes; but she takes
him down, just the same. '-Vogue.
The American guide., 1896-11-28

Mas. GRuMrEY-"Why don't wives rise
MP and make their husbands stand aroundm
Grumpey- Because men never propose to
that kind of women. detroit Free Press.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04

:, There are very intelligent men and
women who still prefer open fires to
steam pipes and furnaces.
But only very shallow minded per-
son would deliberately choose an old
fashioned remedy in case of sickness.
Sufferers from neuralgia, rheuma-
tism or kidney trouble want the surest
and most advanced remedy science can
give them. Getting we'll is not a mat
ter of sentiment, but the most seriously
practical matter. That is why the most
thoughtful and conservative people now
use Paine's celery compound, and REQ.
ommend it. to friends and relatives who
are threatened or afflicted with nervous
exhaustion, sleeplessness, disordered
liver or blood diseases.
That wonderfully acute and patient
investigator, Prof. Edward E. Phelps,
M. D., LII. D., of Dartmouth college,
embodied in Paine's celery compound
the most progressive, vet thoroughly es-
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Power of Thought.

Miss Alice Berry. a boarding house
keeper on State street, Bridgeport.
Conn.,, called a doctor one morning.
stating that she was in terrible agony,
having swallowed her false teeth. plate
and all. She could feel the choking OBJ
ject in her throat and was in constant
danger of strangling to death. On con-
sultation it was decided to resort to
tracheotomy, as the patient was liable
to die. DIR. g. e. Sanford and DIR. G. n.
Payne got their Instruments ready and
were about to administer ether to the
woman when one of them stepped on
some object under the edge of the bed.
Picking 1t up, he found it to be the
missing plate and teeth. It was shown
to the woman, who was about to go into
another CONFUSION, and as soon as she
recognized it the pain left her and she
at once recovered.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Napo,eon,s WIN.

His will displays his qualities in their
entirety. The language sounds SIM
pie and sincere; there is a hidden mean
ing in almost every line. His religion
had been, at best, that of deist; at the
last he professed piety which he
never felt or practiced. During his
life France had been loved and used as
q skillful artifcer uses his tool; the
last word of his testament suggest a
passionate devotion. To his son he rec
commended the 'love of right, which
alone can incite to the performance of
great deeds;;" for his faithless wife he
expressed the tenderest sentiments, and
probably felt them. 1t was his hope that
the English people would avenge it
self on the English oligarchy, and that
France would forgive the traitors who
betrayed her-Marnont, Augereau,
Talleyrand, and Lafayette-as he for
gave them. Louis he pardoned- In the
same spirit for the libel published in
1920; 1t is full of falsehoods and falsi-
fed documents" The blame for Eng
HENS murder he took to himself. The
second portion of the document Is a
series of munifieent sounding bequests,
iisposing Of his supposititious private
fortune, estimated by him at 250, ,000,-
600 francs, to a list of legatees, which
includes every one who had done the
legator any important service since his
earliest childhood. In codicfl he re-
members one Cautillon, who had under
gone trial for an alleged attempt to as
sassinate Wellington. "Cautillon had as
much right to assa ssinate that oligarch
as he (Wellington} to send me to the
rock of st. Helena to perish there" -
Confurr
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Bows in the House.

English housekeepers after strug-
gle with the servant problem, have
attempted it's final solution by the
Introduction of boy "housemaids"
into many homes: in certain circles.
boys are becoming the principal de-
pendence in the household machinery
and the perplexed housekeepers ex-
press themselves as well satisfied with
the change.
Does this foreshadow that horrible
state so necessarily pictured by the
comic papers, of Mans complete sub
lection to household affairs? 1t may
be, but whatever its final result is,
If it tends to alleviate in the least the
weary housekeeper's trouble with her
complaining and cross servant girls,
1t will be gladly welcomed on this side
of the Atlantic.
In the meantime, while the -Four
Hundred are preparing to engage boys
for housemaids, because it is an En-
glish fad to do so, does the innovation
not bring a suggestion to many tired
housekeepers who have no perplexity
over the servant question" because
they, have no servants! There are
many housekepers who work sixteen
hours day, while three or four
healthy, active sons stand around and
watch her. They cannot help, be
cause housework is girls work." and
they cannot lower their standard Of
American manhood. The sweeping
OF floors, the making of beds, the
washing of dishes, the securing of
pans, is not the kind of work these
young men, expect to do, so mother
does 1t all.
The new fad makes all these things
"boys' work" now, and mothers who
are wise will expect their young hope
fuls to give in the future ready and
willing assistance in all departments
Of household work. Why shouldn't
they?
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04

nervous system, plumps out the tissues,
starts the blood into healthy circulation
and regulates the action of the nerves
1t makes people well, strong and ener-
getic. Mrs. R. r. Pratt of Center
Brook, Conn. whose portrait is given
here, says plainly:
II find Paine's celery compound a
perfect medicine. took several bot
ties for general debility, and it did for
me all could ask. 1t made me well. I
have recommended it to my friends,
and they all speak in its praise -
Paine's celery compound Is the most
assured and direct means of getting
back full store of vitality. 1t is a
true nerve regulator. 1t exterminates
all vicious humors that linger in the
blood. It cures rheumatism. and is
used by physicians as specific for this
disease. Says Mrs. W. R. Johnson of
Cape Rozier, Me-:
81 was attacked with rheumatic
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04

fever in its worst form. I employed
the best ply sicians, but received no
permanent relief. When commenced
to take Paine's celery compound my
feet and hands were swollen so badly
that they were useless. I could not
walk step, and was suffering very
much. When had taken four bottles
OF Pains's celery compound l could
walk we'll. and I continued until I
took six bottles. 1t made me perfectly
we'll. and have been so ever since. I
wish the whole world might know Of
its great value"
Paine's celery compound makes peo.
pie well!
Winter searches out the weak parts
in the body; colds settle in the de-
ranged organs and develop disease.
Make every part of the body sound;
build mp the strength and be ready for
the shock Of cold weather by taking
Paine's celery compound
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
A Good Showing.
What a Reporter Learned About
a Certain Medicine.
Erom the Journal. Minneapolis, Mimi.


From the journal. Minneapolis. Mimi.
There is one proprietary medicine II
use in this city, the name OF which haf
become household word and that il
| the preparation known as Pink P1lll
for Pale People, Shakespeare said,
"a rose by any other name would smell!
as sweet. - That may be 80. but
pills put up by any other name would
not have the same attraction nor popu'
lar sales that Pink Pills have in Spo'
kane, Wash.
A representative Of the Minneapolis
Journal started out the other day to in
vesrigate the merits of this popular and
widely sold household medicine. The
evidence was on every, hand. Hamil.
ton B. Merrill, young money loaneI
of Spokane, was seen by the newspaper
man. Mr.. Merrill made no secret OF
his remarkable cure by these little
pellets.
do I know the efficacy Of Pink
Pills?" he reiterated. 81 should rath.
or think do, they have been blessing
to me. am not in the habit of prais.
ing proprietary medicine, but I must
say that Pink Pills as far as my case
goes have no equal in the world. A
little over year ago began ailing and
commenced to lose flesh rapidly. The
doctor told me to stop smoking; this
did, but the result was even worse.
My heart beats decreased to less than
forty minute. / was prescribed fol
by my doctor, but without receiving
any benefit whatever. continued
daily to grow worse and my parents be-
came alarmed over my condition. Some
bne suggested Pink Pills; / thought
would try them anyway. And tell
you I cannot endorse them too highly
they worked like charm in my case.
my flesh increased and felt like new
man. To tell you the truth I am still
taking them. I have sort of fond.
ness for them yet and am loath tc
give them up.
81 know Of a young lady living In
this city, whose condition was even
worse than mine, she took Pink Pills
and is one of society's gayest young
ladies now. I wish were at liberty
to give her name, as am sure she would
only be too delighted to give them q
hearty send off. / believe Pink Pills
cannot be too highly recommended.
They are gems, indeed.
Mr.. Merrill is young man of 20 or
90 years Of age and today is the pink
of health. He has splendid complex
ion and would be the last person to be
taken for one who has been SO seriously
ill only few months ago. He is q
splendid athlete besides and moves in
the best circles of society here.
DR.. Williams' Pink Pills contain, in
condensed form, all the elements
necessary to give new life and richness
to the blood and restore shattered
nerves. They are an unfailing specific
for such diseases as locomotor ataxia,
partial paralysis, st. Vitus' dance, sci
atica, neuralgia, rheumatism, nervous
! headache, the after effect Of la grippe,
palpitatiou of the heart. pale and sal
low compilations, all forms of weakness
either in male or female. Pink Pills
are sold by all dealers, or will be sent
post paid on receipt of price. 90 cents
box, or six boxes for So. so, by address
ling DR.. Williams Medicine Company,
schenectady, N. Y.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
tablished, views ON the cure q dtseasea
of nervous origin.

fa0l16neds Views ON 60e o0fo y o1BoAses
of nervous origin.
All of the imitators of Paine's celery
oompound-every one knows how many
there are-have proved to be entirely
wide of the mark. Their promises Of
astonishing curative abilities are easily
made On paper; but they are not kept.
1t is easy to verify every claim made
by Paine's celery compound. There is
no village so small but it contains fam
lilies in which this wonderful remedy
has made some member we'll Men
who weigh their words and are careful
what they write above their signatures
have publicly given this great invigor-
ator it's deserved credit for health-mak-
ing powers such as no other remedy
ever received.
That Paine's celery compound GER
tainly cures such diseases as neuralgia,
sleeplessness and dyspepsia does not ad-
NIT of doubt 1t builds up the entire
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
We Can't Do a Thing to Her.

To one who has visited telephone
exchange and noticed how central
works, it Is amusing to watch the be-
havior of the man who cannot get rec
ognition. In nine cases out of ten, If
the hour is late and central is sleepy
he goes through this performance:
He turns the handle sharply, jabs
the receiver at his ear, and shouts "Hel-
Ar' through the transmitter. After
waiting moment OF SO, he repeats
the action. Still no answer Then, un-
less he is church member, he uses
language that he would not wish his
wife to hear, and twists the handle
Of the calling bell until hisswrist aches.
It does not disturb central No bells
ring in the telephone exchange. When
the subscriber rings a lozenge-shaped
disk drops, and the number of the call
ing phone is exposed. That Is all. It
remains exposed until central answers
the call and puts the disk back If
centraIs head Is turned the other way,
all the ringing in the world won't at
tract her attention. When she looks
around she'll see the exposed number
and answer the call. If she never looks
around she'll never learn of the CALL
New York Times.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
FREE SILVER.

The coinage of silver might have beer
too free, but the free use of it in a small
sum may be very big investment with
very sure and large profits. What it costs
to buy bottle of st. Jacobs Oil for the cure
of rheumatism is within the reach of the
poorest. Tt is the best investment in this
iine--best cure, and the prohts are sure, be-
.ause it will surely cure. This is SO well
known it is almost a maxim, and so much
good is wrought out of the free use of SO
little that strong, active wurkman can be
made out of a man who before may have
been a helpless invalid or hobbling
criDple
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Sam Crackenthorpe. feartnl of being

Sam Crackenthorpe. eeartul of being
cry question put. The exa mination,
as near as recollect. was a.; follows:
.tWell, Mr.. Crackenthorpe. you know
this fac simile of the miniature you as
serted / had in my pocketI'
.Yes."
~Who painted +. r
"Mr. Moule.'
"Where?"
In my sitting room"
"Who obtained his services?"
'I did"
SAT whose request ~
"A.lady came to see rhe gale: es after
Lord Mountfalcon went off TO the Med
iterranean."
SHer name7"
"Miss E'incaunton."
Where did she see the original min
iature?"
"At Moslem. the jewelers.. in Plea.
dilly."
what story was told the miniature
painter to blind him?r
"That his lordship's sister secretly
wanted copy"
for copy?"
Because she so admired the like
ness"
Three months afterward Mr.. Ather-
stone and witnessed the ceremony of
the marriage at St. Georges, Hanover
square, between Lord Mountfalcon and
the beautiful Lady Susan Brewster A
rival. Miss 'Wincaunton, had insinuated
the nobleman was in love with her, pro-
ducing as proof the miniature she had
obtained under such mean and crafty
circumstances. Lady Brewster return
ed Lord Mountfalcon's picture in fit
of anger, believing the falsehood, and
broke off the engagement. On Mr.. Ath-
erstone communicating the facts of the
case Lady Susan became reconciled to
her old lover. '.fsr
After the ceremonial was over Mr..
Atherstone took me out for luncheon.
Later on, dallying. with cigar and a
bottle of claret, the art dealer said: =
81 think we are in duty bound to drink
the health of the bride and bride
groom"
We did 1t in bumpers.
'By the bye" continued my old
friend. II shall run down the week af-
ter next to Shrewton court, for Lord
Mountfalcon told me he had fitted you
up capital quarters as the new keeper
Of his art galleries. ."-Lloyd's London
Weekly.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04

STATE OF OHIO, CITY OF TOLEDO, IS.
LUCAS COUNTY,
FRANK J. CHENEY makes oath that he Is the
senior partner of the firm of +. J. CHENEY & Co.,
doing business in the city of Toledo, County
and State aforesaid, and that said firm will pay
the sum of ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for
each and every case of CATARRH that cannot be
cured by the use of HALLS CArARRH CURE:
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in my
presence, this 9th day OF December, A. D. 1885.
wv. GLEASON,
Notary Public.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally, and
acts directly on the blood and mucous surfacet
OF the system. Send for testimonla1s, ffse.
Sold by druggists, zoe.
Hail,s Family Pills are the best.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Something New.

The Chicago Times-Herald says that
a Western gentleman lately found his
new cook in the drawing-room. gazing
with much interest at the aquarium.
''Well, Biddy," said the gentleman,
In a kindly tone, "what do you think
Of them?',
"Sure, sor," answered the cook, upon
my soul, If they amt rale lovely! An,
begorra, perhaps you wouldn't behave
it, but this is the first time that iver
saw red herrings alive beforew
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Around the
HearfhSfOne.
THE SONG OF PAN.

Mad with love, and laden
With immortal pain,
Panspursued maiden
Pan, the god, in vain.
For when Pan had nearly
Touched her, wild to plead,
She was gone-and clearly
In her place a reed!
Long the god, unwilling,
Through the valley strayed,
Then at last, submitting,
Cut the reed, and made
Deity fashioned, seven
Pipes, and poured his pain
Unto earth and heaven
In 4 piercing strain.
So with god and poet;
Beauty lures them on,
Flies, and ere they know it
Like wrath is gone.
Then they seek to borrow
Pleasure still from wrong,
And with smiling sorrow
Turn it to a song.
Lampman.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Girls Evening Dresses.

'The materials in vogue for young
girls gowns for evening parties are
simple but dainty" writes Isabel A.
Mallon in the Ladies' Home Journal.
Lightweight silks, chiffon over silk,
Drgandy or dotted muslin developed in
the same way with decorations Of
outhful-looking laces and many rib
bons make particularly pretty gowns
for evening wear. The young girls
bodice Is made either quite high and
finished with soft frili about her neck
or else it is cut out in what is known
as the Dutch square, Long sleeves or
elbow puffs are proper with the Dutch
square, and many picturesque effects
are obtained by this combination. No
matter how rounded an arm may be.
nor how pretty the hand, evening
gloves should be worn with the party
dress. The fan is not an absolute ne
cessity to the evening toilette, but it is
always a pretty and a graceful addi-
ton
''China silk, lightweight corder silks,
chiffon, organdy and muslin are the ma
terials dedicated to the young girl.
When any one Of these is made up for
evening wear the lining should be of a
lightweight, but not a corded, silk, or
an inexpensive satin. Pale blue, tur-
quoise-blue, rose and salmon pink, pale
silver-gray, and, best of all, white, are
the colors in vogue for the young girl.
No matter how charming the heliotrope
shade may seem 1t should not be chosen
for a young girl, and no matter how
glowing and attractive bright red fab
ric is, 1t Is inartistic as party dress,
and should on no account be chosen. In
this connection 1t may be said that the
prettiest Of all party dresses for q
young girl is the one made Of white
material"
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Disturbed Her Nan.

A minister named Pettigrew, who,
on asking why his flock were so regard.
less of his exhortation to them to re.
main awake during the sermons, was
told that his own wife set the example,
but as she sat below the pulpit she was
out of the minister's sight. On this 1t
was arranged that on the following
Sunday the informant should hold up
his finger when Mrs. Pettigrew sue
cumbed to Morpheus.
The preacher bent forward and saw
his consort enjoying snug nap. With
a tremendous blow on the pulpit he
aroused her from her slumber, and 'as
the lady, who, according to the legend,
was destitute of both fortune and
beauty, looked up, he addressed her in
accents Of wrath: "Sit We there, Jean
Pettigrew! Ye are ma bonnie; gat nae
tocher WI ye, and gin We hae ma heaven
ly grace about We hae gotten an unca
bad bargain O. yev'-Pittsburg Dis
patch.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04

There is little girl In cslauAus, O.,
whose mother Is In the habit Of usia 4
the phrase, "oh, don't mention tip
when any one Apologies to her. This
little girl was naughty enc day ana
her mother said to her: "Dlsie, what
will God think when you tell him to-
night how bad you have been to-day ?"
"My mamma" said Elsie, 'els will say:
Elsie, don't mention itr"
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
No Choice,

Young Man-Ah! How do, Dick7 Is
your sister at home?
Little Dick-Which sister? The home
" one what's. goin' to have all pas
money,s because she's likely to be an
old maid, or the pretty one what amt
goin' to have anythin?
Young Man-Um-er-both of them
-Woonsocket Reporter
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
AN APpEAL FOR ASSISTANCE.

The man who is charitable to himself will
listen to the mute appeal for assistance made
by his stomach, or his liver, in the shape of
divers dyspeptic qualms and uneasy sensa-
tions in the regions OF the gland that secretes
his bile. Hostetters Stomach Bitters, my dear
sir, or madam-as the case may be-is what
you require. Hasten to use If you are troubled
with heartburn, wind in the stomach, or note
that your skin or the whites of your eyes are
taking sallow hue.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04

No one would drink poor
tea if he or she knew the
difference in tea.
Good tea is not costly.
Your grocer will sell you
ScAizzing's Best and return
your money in full if you
don't like it
schiIling & Company IL.
San Francisco S8
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04

Strength and Sex in Royalty.
1t Is noted that the women of the
royal families of Europe are, on the
average, much stronger, mentally and
physicaIly. than the men.
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04

When you can't say anything else
complimentary of man, you can usu.
ally say that he means well
The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1896-12-04
Mo More season TIcket,

NJ. Porel has given up the season
ticket system at the Paris Gymnase
and Vaudeville theaters, on the ground
that 1t entails more work on the part
Of the artists than 1t Is worth.