Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1896-08-20
SPINNING WHEEL.

When Walter Q. Gresham was post
master-general under President Arthur
he received call from an old friend
of his who lived in New Jersey, and
whom Mr.. Gresham had not seen since
the two had attended school together
long before. The postmaster-genera
gave his visitor an enthusiastic welcome
and inquired with great show of ear
nestness what he could do for him, in
timating that if the caller cared for the
postmastership in his town he could have
it for the asking. But the Jerseyman
was not after any office. mo, Gresham,
he said, Il did not come to see you for
an office. | came here simply to shake
hands with you as an old friend. l never
wanted any office and never expect to
want one. But. Mr.. Postmaster-g general.
there is one little thing you can do for
my friends back there in New Jersey.
You can render, if you will. Il service
to the inhabitants of my state that will
cause your name to be forever honored
among them" Gresham was startled at
this impressive statement. He could not
imagine what was coming. Was the
whole state of New Jersey after more
mails, or faster mails, or what? "Why,
what can that be?" he asked, appre-
hensively. 'Gresham,'' replied the caller,
They have got beastly flavor. They
are not fit for any self-respecting citizen
of this great republic to chew on. Now,
if you want to become at single step
the idol of Il great state, and have your
name and memory cherished in the
hearts of a grateful commonwealth, fla
vor your postage stamps with New Jer-
sey applejack." The postmaster-general
laughed most heartily when he had
heard his friends COMPLAINT
-:O:-
Extract from the last letter of Lon
don young man who committed suicide:
playing cards and backing horses Las
been my ruin. 1t is the curse of This
place. Would to God l had never seen
London
A son of Erin, who is captain in the
police department. tells this story of
race: The American was mounted on
Il fine Kentucky thoroughbred. The
Irishman was astride a mule. They
were riding on the Western plains, when
a number of screeching Indians appeared
over a nearby hill and started toward
them on round run 1t Immediately
became race for scalps. The American
on the racer ran quite away from his
companion on the mule, but returned and
urged Pat to put on more speed.
They've gained on us, Pat" he shouted,
'hurry up, man. hurry up. or we're dead
persimmons, sure" Pat put whip and
spurs to his animal, but in spite of all
his efforts. the Indians drew closer and
closer. The American ran all around
him, shouting and urging and encourag-
ing, but the wild crew behind continued
to draw nearer. They were now not
six lengths behind and gaining at every
jump. Pats arms and heels were beat
ing the wind mercilessly The Ameri-
can was pleading and threatening.
Hang it all, man." he shouted. ride
too much for Pat. ''To HI wild ye," he
answered. ''d'ye tink Ohm trowin' de
race?" -Memphis Commercial Appeal.
The United States consul at Havre re-
ports that with the decline of the grape
crop in France, increased attention has
been paid to the cultivation of apples and
the production of cider, which has. IN
measure. superseded wine as the national
drink Official statistics just published
show that there were 67S,OO0.OOO gallons
of cider produced in France in 1895, be-
ing an increase of 1911, 100000 gallons
over the preceding year and of 800 ,OOO,O 600
gallons over the average for the ten pre-
ceding years. Bottling cider has become
a large industry in France. Good cider
in bottles ought to be clear and sparkling,
and when properly prepared, is popu-
lar drink. not only. on account of it's
pleasant and refreshing taste, but for the
still more important reason that cider is
now regarded in France as the most
hygienic of all drinks, much more So in
deed, than the best of wines. AS evil
)dence of the growing popularity of the
beverage and the extent to which it is
used by all classes. it may be stated that
of the many hundred millions of gallons
made last year. not more than 100000
gallons were exported.
Curran. the famous orator and wit,
never hesitated to sacrifice his friends
for the sake of a joke. On one occa-
sion the Merchant Tailors' guild of Dub
lin gave banquet, to which he was in
vited: in fact, he was the guest of honor.
He kept his hosts amused all evening.
There were just eighteen of his enter
tainers and when Curran took his leave
he waited till he reached the door, then
with smile and bow said: "AnL
now. gentlemen. / have the honor of
saying good night to both of you" He
made his escape before the eighteen tail
ors realized the joke and then it was
too late to catch him.
DESIRABLE BUT DANGEROUS.
The sweetest peach
The highest grows;
The SharpeSt thorn
Turks near the rose;
But no man any
Pleasure reaches