Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1896-04-10
atjausiae Gatherings.


costs more than it is worth.
p6- 1t is generally the man who
can't waltz who declares that dancing
is sinful.
r@ Man will utter 10 words to ex
press his joys and 80 to lament hi'
sorrows.
sT Two dollars is the price of 6
divorce in Japan, and it only takes
four hours to get one.
t@ A wise man says it is better te
be accused without occasion than te
have occasion to accuse yourself.
eH A man who cheats at cards will
steal in other transactions. This Is ar
invariable and irrevocable rule.
p6r Go where duty calls, but turn in
and help when you get there. Don''
stand around with your hands in your
pockets.
p6- There is always a demand fol
the best fruits, the hest products OF
the dairy, the truck patch, the garden
or the field. There is always room al
the top.
sy A better stretcher for a tight
shoe than any cobbler's last is to walk
through pool of water, or, if posi-
BILE, wet grass, and thnn keep on walk.
ing till the boots are dry.
p6 Not rapid transit: "Is this a fast
train ?" asked the travelling man of the
porter. "Of coarse it is" was the re-
ply. II thought so. Would you
mind my getting out to see what it is
fast to ?"
p~ A white object of any size may
be seen in the sunlight at distance OF
1880 times its diameter that is to
say, if it is a white ball foot in di'
ameter, it can be perceived at a dis
tance of 1880 feet.
B8r Fogg says that sometimes he is
led to believe that there are people In
the world who are religious not because
it does them any good, but because it
puts them in the way to make great
many other persons uncomfortable. ..
~ The most remarkable instance
of Observation-Disclosures on record is that
of gentleman who, being sent to the
shoe shop to have peg taken from his
wife's shoe, went to dentists instead,
and had one of his teeth pulled.
s@ II aim goin' in SO terrible strong
for desc new women idees," said Uncle
Eben, "but I kahn symperthize wifi a
lot O. able-bodied citizens dat seem ter
think er woman mustn't do er mans
work, onless she's done married de
man."
p@ Josh Billings says: "There IL
one thing about a hen that looks like
wisdum-they don't kackle much un-
til after they have laid their eggs. Sum
pholks are alwus a Dragging and q
kackling what they are going tew do
p% "How jaded your horse looks,
cabman !" remarked an old lady, as she
from the cab. "Is not
the bit uncomfortably large for his
"It amt the big bit in, his
mouth, mum. It's the small bit in his
stomach"
p@ We often complain of the fire.
quent changes in the temperature, yet
without these changes there would be
no seasons, no clouds, no rain, no life.
There would be one eternal calm, and
the atmosphere would soon become
stagnant and poisonous. So science
tells us.
s9 MISUNDERSTANDING you would
prefer one of these higher-priced cask-
cts You naturally desire to show a
becoming respect for the deceased.
son.in-law-Not exactly;
for public opinion was what |
was thinking of. A dead person can't
talk live persons can, and do.
s@ "Poor Jenny 1t must be an
awful shock to you," sympathized her
friend. "And to think you trusted him
all these years, while he was EN-.
bezzling such enormous sums !'' "Yes,"
she sobbed, II knew my millinery
alone came to more than his salary, but
never suspected him."
H6- The way of fauctioneers in differ
ent parts of the world vary greatly.
In this country and England the sellers
bear the expenses of the sale; but in
France the purchaser bears the cost,
five per cent. being added to his pur-
chase. In Holland it is still worse, the
buyer being required to pay ten per
cent. additional for the expenses of the
sale.
E6 We must face the fact that the
large majority of our people cannot be
clerks, bookkeepers, salesmens type
writer's, telegraph operators, much less
actors, editors, doctors, law
yers and politicians. There must be
laborers, mechanics, carpenters, black
smiths and farmers, ard the public
schools must educate the majority for
the work they have to do in life.
p9 A lady tells this: "We needed
eggs one morning, and cid Maggie was
sent to the grocery to get some. Later
in. the day Maggie volunteered tie
general remark that 'eggs is high.
Are they?' 1 replied. How much p
Forty cints a dozen, mum. Sure I'd
he after buying no eggs at that price,