Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-09-17

insist that it is the other fellow who
is at fault, and that the millennium
will surely dawn if the people will only
listen to their siren song once more.
Why, one would suppose that a merci
less drubbing, such as the times have
administered upon these self-constitutet
and self-centcred apostles of reform
would make even brass monkey blancf
and a bronze statue turn pale, but slip
perry political sharks and shysters
never; they are not built that way.
Lamentation is heard on the streets
that gold is leaving our shores.
Why shouldn't it leave?
Why should it stay?
1t Is leaving us for the very good
reason that the balance Of trade Is
against us. Because we are buying
more than we are selling, across the
sea. Because for the first four months
of 1895 the value of our imports ex
ceeded the value of our exports by sos,
051,551. Because under this perfidy ant
dishonor tariff Of to-day. Europe and
the European importers trust have
American manufacturers and American
wage-earners by the throat.
Gold is likely to leave us until con
| gress ceases to legislate in the interests
of Europe and commences to enact laws
in behalf of the United States.
Free coinage and free trade, free
love, free liquor and free lunch never
fail TO strike responsive chords in the
bosom of weary Waggles" and his
struggling, but rarely struggling CO
| horts.
Too many think with their digestive
faculties and are always ready to gulI
allopathic doses of fallacy.
The fellow who promises most is their
hero.
The fallir who agrees to transform
Lazarus into Dives by Legislative magic
is their Messiah.
Something for nothing" is the rally
ing cry of anarchists and fiatists every.
where.
The drone takes as naturally to finan.
cial fads as the dude to freaks of fash.
ion.
Both are blotches on the body poll
tic.
Both are barnacles on the ship Oh
state.
Yesterday it was the greenback her,
esy.
To-day it is the silver fallacy.
Tomorrow it will be some other
blooming idiocy.
In ALL it is fiatism, in one form or an.
other.
Harmless? Yes, if they die a-bornin'
as they deserve to die.
But every one of these fat money
schemes carries singer.
In the end it will wound the very
people who give it the most considera
ton.
am reminded of the story that FL
Perkins tells on the old Baptist clergy
man.
He was talking about patience to the
Sabbath school scholars. The after
noon was hot and the air was full of sun
shine and singing birds and buzzins
insects.
The dear old clergyman can see
him now-was telling us boys never
TO Oct out of temper.
Boys" he said, you should always
be patient. You should never lose your
temper. Never allow angry passions
to rise. You should never say naughty
words. Never get excited.
II did once, but never any more.
Let me
Boys" pointing upward, "you see
that little fly on my nose?
"A wicked, worldly man would get
angry at that fly, but don't
"What would l do?"
"Why, my children, simply say: Go
away-fy-go away'-and- Gosh blast
tits "a wasp"
And so of sixteen or bust"
It's wasp.
Kill it!
The demagogue is far more dangerous
than the dynamiter.
His methods are more reprehensible
Like the serpent of old, which beguiled
our first parents 70 their ruin, and then
crawled off into the bushes and left the
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