davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05

the people shall mourn. This buying
Of votes and selling Of votes, the frauds
in legislation, this ballot-box stufing
win as certainly bring revolution as
that disease brings death and death
produces p~utrefaction. A good man
breads to speak. He hesitates to inter
fere with the order of things, He
knows that every little party editor
and dirty sheet, called a newspaper, in
the state will heap their abuse upon
him, and hold him up to ridicule and
confumely. A mar breads to fight
them as he dpads to fight q skunk,
not that the skunk will hurt him, but
that the skunk will make him stink.
These things ought not so to be. The
good citizens of this country had bet
ter take n day off now and then in the
interest of good government and pure
officials. 1t would be a day well put
in, for, after all, the Legislators make
the laws and the officials enforce the
laws, and it is the law at last that
gives US protection to life and liberty
and property. I would repeat what /
NV S~NA DGAOACp NlEAb lO INV vi any
statute book in the world is any better,
practically, than the gang enforcing it,
Personal integrity, personal purity,
sobriety and uprightness ought to be
the only grounds for any mans candi-
dacy, and the only basis for his cleo
ton to office. The man who CANDLES
or drinks liquor, or traffios or trades
in Office. ought not to be allowed to
sit in any Legislature, or to sit on any
judicial bench, or to occupy amy office
in the stlte. When you down the ras-
calls you down the rings, and when you
down the rings you down the rum.
And If you can down these three
RS, protection of life, liberty and prop
erty will be guaranteed until these
three RS get on top again.
SAM p. JONFa.
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05
nllusful Ignorance.

Now asformea and mine we don'tknow
a blame blessed thing about the great
question of free silver. And what diff
ference does it make-whether they
turn out gold or silver or paper-to the
mar that amt got no money and no
prospects to speak of.
Only the other day 1 heard Andrew
Lucas and one OF the Milligan boys hav-
In the dadblarldest most furious dispu-
tation in regards to gold and silver,
when both of them put together would
lack about four bits Of havin enough
money to pay spot cash for two square
meals. They made me think of the ole
story wherein the two cats fell out. and
fit about the cheese whilst the monkey
climbed up around the whole chunk.
Blamed if Il don't sometimes wish the
politicians had to take the everlastin
money question and fight it cut in that
foreign country where they don't hava
TO wear o~vercoats nor shovel any snow
to speak OF.
RUFUS SANDERS
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05
From the Jaws of Death.

By this time, you will understand, il
looked like every breath would be the
last one for Josh. But finally at last
the women and the elders give up the
case and went out, and the doctor he
went in to practice.
"What's the matter with you, Josh ?"
says the doctor.
Il am dyin, doctor, dyin," says Josh.
Hanged if 1 don't believe you are"
saws the doctor, though 1 can't find
nothin Earticlcr the matter with you.
But if you will die, Josh, dadblame it,
straighten out them long legs and die
like a man. 1 wouldn't die all curled
up there like a wet and hungry dog"
Well, Josh he Strengthened out, he
cid, so Us to die decent, but you could
see he didn't love for the doctor to talk
so Internal plain and rough around his
deathbed. But the doctor went on:
There, now. That looks a little
more like a white man fixin to die.
Now, see here, Josh, if nothin else will
do you 1 reckon you will have to die,
ond the next thing is to take your
proper measure so we can make the
black box to fit the man."
And with that the cid doctorwent out
and cut him a long stick to take the
measure with. Then he came back and
measured Josh all around and all over.
Presently he put one end of the stick
under the dyin mans nose so as 10
take his measure from that pint to his
toes. Then all of q suddent like he
jabbed Josh under the nose with that
stick as hard as he could driveit.
Well, man, sir, from what they tell
me, Josh Galloway riz up from there,
he did. And when he riz he riz fightin
mad and a cussin. Sick and weak as he
was, it took three or four ome and
elders to hoId him off of the cid doc
tor. And then, bless gracious, by the
time they could git him back on the
bed he had give out the notion of dyin
and forgot ali he had ever heard about
death and the grave.
The old doctor then told the women
folks to give Josh a good, healthy dost
of calcmel that night, and follow it
next mornin with plenty of salts and
snnkeroot tea. 1t was right after sup
per time that night when the old doc
tor rid by our house on his return back
from the hill country to tell me the
general difference between the LayinO on
of hands and practicin.
Josh Galloway is now so as to be up
and about and from all experiments l
reckon it will be a long time before
they will have to do any singin and
slow walkin for him.
And that's what makes me say what !
do. If it ever to pass that l
mought be took down rale bad sick
give me a doctor thnt knows the differ
ence between the layin on of hands and
practicin. Send for old DR.. Stouden-
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05

medicine, but he has got great guSS al
common sense, and what little he GEaut
know about verbs ond roots and peo-
pie and things wouldn't scarcely be
worth the trouble OF leaTnin.
They worked up a tremendous bad
case over in the hill country the other
day, and if it hadn't been for that good
old doctor I reckon there would of
been some singin and slow walkin
ir the settlement before now.
Josh Galloway was a mighty sick
man about hat time from what they
tell me. He had So many different
things the matter with him in general,
and yet Eothin in particular, till no
body couldn't say for certain what it
was. But at any rates, he was sick.
and his folks all thought he was sick
unto death. He vas mopin and droopin
around tellin everybody that the dew
damps of death was on him, and he
was bound to go. He got worse and
worse, till finally Mt last he went, 10
bed and sent for all the family kinnery
TO come and tell him gcod-by, and
look upon his face for the last time in
this life.
Now, in the main time the Gallowavs
have all got a strange and pecurious
kind of religion to me. They don't be-
lieve in doctors, and medicine if they
can help it. When Josh got to his
worst they took and bought some sweet
oil and "nointed" him, as they call it.
Then they sent out and called in the
elders to lay their hands on him. But
with all of that Josh he got worse and
worse till by gracious it looked like die
he would. So at last they sent for old
DIR. Stoudenmire. Josh told the
folks they needn't to send. II
was all vanity and vexation of spirit.
Ills time had come. He was bound to
die. But they sent unbeknowance to
him.
And when the old doctor got there
the women and the elders was crowded
around the bed "nointin" Josh with
oil and layin on the hands, Thu
old doctor he politely Poked off and
took his seat on the back porch and
lit his pipe, and then took life easy
Tor about two hours. And by and by
the folks wanted to know what he
was goin to do for poor Josh.
Not a dadblame thing" says hs,
"till the women and the elders take out
and quit. When they quit layin ON Of
the hands l will then go to practicin."
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05
A QUEER MANIA.
How n SicilIan Monomaniac Diverted
Himself.

Himself.
The Sicilian prince of Valguanera al
the beginning of this century was q
monomaniac of rare description. He
succeeded to one of the largest fortunes
in Europe, his habits were studious and
economical, he had no children; but, in
spite of these advantages for saving
money, he contrived to ruin himself.
The prince had a fancy for grotesque
statues, with which he adorned the
stately mansions of his forefathers.
Many descriptions of the place are eX.
tant, for it was renowned through Eu.
rope in its day. Brydone visited it, and
he has left us a pleasant picture. APP
preaching by n noble avenue, one found
the palace Cncircled by an "army" of
monsters. "The absurdity of sthe
wretched Imagination which created
them is not less astonishing than its
wonderful fertility" says Brydone.
Some were n compound of five or six
animals which had no resemblance in
nature. In one instance the head of a
lion was set upon the neck of 4 goose
with the body Of a lizard, the eye of a
goat and the tail of q fox. Upon the
back of this object stood another with
five or six heads and n grove of horns.
uhereis no kind of n horn in the world
that has not collected, and his pleas
ure is I see them all hourishing on the
same skull"
OF such horrors there were COO in the
avenue and the courtyard alone when
Brydone saw the collection. and the
prince maintained a regiment OF sculp-
tors, who were rewarded proportion
ately to their success in designing new
and unparalleled combinations.
The effect upo a superstitious peas
antry may be imagined. So serious was
the agitation that the government Of
Sicily threatened to demolish the won
drous array several times, but a prince
of Valguanera was not to be offended in
those days without the grnvest cause.
The inside of the house was eccentric
in another fashion. Here the mailman
diverted himself with columns and
arches and pyramids of cups and
saucers, teapots and the like cemented
together. One column, for instance,
started from a great porcelain vase Of
shape familiar in bedrooms, but not
elsewhere; the shaft was teapots, with
the spouts protruding. graduated in
size up to a capital of flower pots. The
opening of windows was incrusted in
this manner, the chimney pieces were
loaded up TO the ceiling and the mag
nifcent rooms of the palace were d.
yided by fantastic arches Of the same
construction. China was rare and fine
in Sicily at that day, and most of the
pieces thus treated had great value.
The princes bedroom was a chamber Of
supreme horrors. Reptiles, awful be-
yond conception, had their homes there.
intermixed with pleasing busts and
statues which, if turned, showed q
skeleton, OF a hideous representation
q decrepitude. We have never observed
aa allusiou to these things in a modern
YSFk of travel. Perhaps the govern.
ment destroyed them at the princes
death. beggared by his mania.-London
Standard.
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05
Too Economical.

There are worse things than hayina
one's feelings hurt, according to Upcls
Pomp, m old darky who has lived in =
New England household for nearly "a
years.
Young Mr.. Willums am all here
WE'LL" remarked Uncle Pomp one day.
to a friend of the family, but he don't
compare wild old Mr.. WiHums, sab
don't compare wild him"
why, it is strange you should feel
that way" said the visitor. Young
Mr.. Williams seems to me much more
careful of you in every way than his
father"
He am careful OBJ me, sah," respond.
ed Uncle Pomp, 'he am careful, dat.
a fac; but when old Mr.. Willups he for
gets hisself and treats me like I was n
slave, he's mighty sorry afterward.
sab, and cherry time he gibs me a ouar-
ter. Use getting to be a old-maa's,b-
and dose quarters come in mighty
handy. / can't afford to hab folks so
mighty careful OBJ my feelings as young
Mr.. Willums. sab, and OATS the TRUTHS
Youths Companion.
NIL
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05
Plansnnt nrIdnIrhr vI.I.nr.

Mayor Murphy, of Tempe, Ariz., was
awakened by a rattle m night recently,
and not knowing of any arrival who
would be shaking one in the small hours,
he got mp to investigate, and had to kill
a rattlesnake which was on the front
piazza before going back to EeaaA
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05

day last week.
A small vacan-
cy had occurred
at the county
~poorhousc, and
II o w c o IA S e.
q~uentially a s
you ride along
the big road by
old Pilgrims
Rest you will
tic e some
fresh dirt piled
up out there in
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05
a Practic,ng Phrslcian.

Up to this present wrftin l never have
had any particular use for doctors.
They are most in generally mighty
good men, no doubts, but somehow, I
don't like their samples. But If it
ever docs come to pass that l rought
take down sick and need a doctor / do
hope they win send for old DR.. Stoud-
enmire. He don't claim to know
20 awful much ,about books anil
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05

the graveyard. That is where they
buried old man Steve Hasseltine-
which so far as anybody knows he was
the last of his generation and died with
q bad case of the dTopsy in the feet
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05

Bilse, the conductor of the popular
concerts at Berlin, has Just celebrated
his sOth birthday.
The Houma courier. (Houma, La.) 1878-1939, 1896-12-05
QUAINT AND QUEER.
Some Pure Philosophy from the
Baokwoods
Rufus Sanders Writes About the "BulIish
I~nfluence' of Death-The Layin on OF
Hands and Predicting Physio-
The Money Question.

There was singin and slow walkin
over at old Pilgrims Rest church one
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1896-07-09
FRILLS OF FASHION.

White linen lawn vests, with hem
stitched tucks and frill down the front
and a turnover linen collar, are one of
the novelties 10 wear with the coat and
skirt gown.
One of the perennials of fashion is the
Figaro jacket, which crops up with
great regularity. This season it is very
short, to display the wide folded belt.
and made of oriental embroidery.
1t is rumored that earrings are COM
ing into favor again, and the duchess
Of York has really appeared with dia-
monds suspended from her ears. We
are threatened, too, with the old-time
bracelets and black velvet, with gold and
ieweled clasps.
Red is the accepted color for golf suits,
and red serge madewith Norfolk jacket
and skirt, finished on the edges With
green leather. is very chic. Brown cloth
Fskirts, with bright-red blouse waists.
are very effective, and Russian crash is
the material for hot-weather golf cos
tunes.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1896-07-09
EFFECTS OF A SMILE: YUCAIAh KILLS IT.
THE CLERGY.

Rubenstein's "Christus," which was
performed in Bremen last year, has
been forbidden in Berlin on the ground,
that the Prussian law prohibits the,
representation of the Saviour in public
entertainments.
NJ. Francis de Pressense, son of the
best known Protestant pastor and poll
tician in France, is about to he received.
into the Catholic church, and probably
will be followed by a number of French
pastors.
Leo XIII. is the doyen of the Catholic
episcopate. He received his episcopal
conservation in 1S43, and there is no
bishop living whose conservation is so
old. It has rarely happened that the
pope was the oldest bishop in the Cath
Ollie world.
rial of John Robinson, the pastor Of the
Pilgrim Fathers, is to be erected at
Ga;nsborough, England, where Robin
son gathered his first congregation of
dissenters. The church will cost $780,
600, and Ambassador Bayard will lay
the corner stone.
Prof. George Adam Smith, of the
Free Church college, Glasgow, Scot
land, who is described as lone of the
leading scholars OF Christendom, and.
one of the greatest preachers of Great
Britain" preached on recent Sunday
in the Old South church, Boston, and
not a paper in Boston had line about
him or his sermon
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1896-07-09
Nature.s Lightning Rods.

There is often great loss of property
and sometimes of life, in the severe cleo
trical storms that rage at certain times
of the year in Russia. To protect the
houses of the peasants, which are fire.
quently struck by lightning, the Rus
sian government has recommended that
the peasantry be encouraged to plant
white poplar trees around their dwell
ings, to act as lightning rods. The sug-
eestion arose out of some investigations
concerning the liability to lightning
stroke of certain species of trees made
by a Russian electrician and the gov
eminent forest inspector. They spent
1o9 days in the great forests near Mos
COW, and OF the SGT trees that during
that time were struck by lightning
they found 302 were white poplar, not
withstanding the fact that that species
is comparatively rare.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1896-07-09
GRAINS OF WHEAT.

Italy raises 100000 bushels Of
wheat.
Russia raises 10000. 900 bushels of
wheat.
The wheat crop of India is 235, GOO, 600
bushels.
France raises about 231 900, 900 bush
els of wheat.
The wheat product of Hungary is
l19, OoO,0oO bushels.
The wheat fields of South Australia
yield &c bushels per acre.
Great Britain produces 100000
bushels, all consumed at home.
The average wheat crop in England
is SO bushels per acre
In the wheat belt OF India the average
production per acre is 9.3 bushels.
The average yield of wheat in New
South Wales is Is bushels to the acre.
Manitoba, the great wheat farm of
British America, raises 1877 bushels to
the acre.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1896-07-09
WHAT'S THE USE9

Don't coddle up woe. Don't think shsut
your foe.
What's the use?
It only makes yousworry, and keeps you in
a furry.
What's the use? There's no excuse.
Don't talk about your wrong. it makes it
last too long.
What's the use?
1t only gives you pain, and suffering again.
Don't talk Of your disaster, it makes the
tears flow faster.
What's the use?
Tt only keeps you weeping, and f1inders you
from sleeping
What's the use? There's no excuse.
Don't talk of your mishap. it's only one
rap.
What's the use?
1t only can annoy. and your peace of mind
destroy.
What's the use? There's no excuse.
Don't talk of your affection, it only causes
friction.
What's the use?
1t opens an old sore. and worries you the
more.
What's the use? There's no excuse
Don't talk about your sorrow. trouble you
only borrow.
What's the use?
It only makes you sad. and sour and glun
and mad.
What's the use? There's no excuse.
w. L. Ormsby. Jr.. in N. 7. Sun.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1896-07-09
CHAPTER XIII.
TOMATOES OATH


At sunrise on the following dav I lit
fire by which to prepare soup for the
senior, who still slept, and as was en-
gagged thus l saw the lady Maya walk
ing toward me and noticed that her
hands and feet were swollen.
Sonora" l said, bowling before her,
81 humbly congratulate you upon your
courage and your escape from great
dangers. Last night 1 said words to
you in my grief that should not have
been spoken, for it is my fault that I
am apt to be unj just to women. Now I
crave your pardon, and I will add that
if in atonement for my past injustice I
can serve you in any way now and
afterward l pray you to command me-"
She listened, and answered.:
Il thank you for your kind words,
Don Ignatio. If you wish to show your
self my friend it is in your power to do
So You have guessed my secret, there
fore am not ashamed to repeat that
the senior yonder has become every
thing to me, though as vet may be
little to him. / ask you then to swear
upon the Heart that you will do moth
ing to separate us, that whatever may
be our need you will help us by all
means in your reach"
"You ask me to swear large oath,
sonora. and one that deals with the fu-
ture, of which we have no knowledge"
dhSWCrcO, hcSiIdtLnS
81 do, senior: but remember. were it
not for me at this moment your friend
who sleeps yonder like a child would
be stiff in death. Remember, also, that
YOU have ends to gain in the City of
the Heart, where it will be well for you
to have me as friend should we ever
live to reach it.
There is no need to threaten me,
sonora" answered. II promise that I
will not stand between YOU and the
senior: But see. he awakes, and his
soup is ready"
She took the pot off the fire, skinned
it. and poured the contents into gourd
Then she walked to the hammock and
said: "Senor. here is your SOUP
He was but newly awakened, and
looked at her vacantlv.
Tell me. Maya" he said. what has
happened?'
Last evening"" she began. Sin pick
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1896-07-09
WELL TO TRY.

Rubbing irons with a little wax, to
prevent starch sticking.
Adding pinch of salt to the white
of egg in beating, to make it froth-
Taking ink stains from wash goods.
by rubbing with yolk Of egg before
washing.
Peach pudding sauce of the extra
juice III can of fruit, with a little sugar
and water and few drops of almond
extract; boil up and serve.
Removing scorch from linen by
spreading over them this mixture: the
juice of two onions, one-half ounce of
white soap. two ounces of fuller's earth
and one-half pint of vinegar, all boiled
together and cooled before using.
Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1896-07-09

'DocToR-"The matter with You Is that
YOU want to be out more" Patient--sI'.l
be outenouGh when get your bill, DOCTOR
-Yonkers Statesman.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1896-06-03
One Jurors Judgment.

Judge Daniels CT Buffalo, who served
IS years on the New York supreme
bench before coming to congress, re-
lates an incident which fcrcibly illus
trates the curious methods by which
people occasionally reach conclusions.
Some years ago man named Green
field, living in New York state, killed
his wife lie was convicted at the first
trial, but the case was carried to the
court Of appeals, which reversed the
findings of the lower court Governor
Robinson then ordered q special rehear-
ing to be held at Syracuse. Judge Dan
iels presided. When an examination Of
the jurors began, curious circumstance
occurred. One of the jurors declared that
he had already prejudgcd the case. He
was asked ii he had read the printed ac-
counts i'll the newspapers. He had not
Neither, he said, had he talked with
any one about it. He was accordingly
excused. Judge Daniels, however, was
not so easily satisfied. His curiosity was
piqued, and he sent the sheriff before
the man left the courtroom to ascertain
how he could reach conclusion i'll q
case when he had never read up on it CT
discussed it. -"
why" he replied, "the lawyers
made such ID fools of themselves OK
aiming the jurors that knew the pris
oner must be guilty" - Washington
Pest.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1896-06-03
What the Alabama Did.

In Tic WEI between the northern and
southern states, which ragged in America
during 18G1-5, we have the only IL
stance in which steam cruisers have
been employed Oh any scale to harry
CONNIE rec. The south had 10 commerce
to be attacked, brt the north had q
large and prospt rous merchant marine.
From first to last the south sent II
steam cruisers and small sailing cluis-
ers to sea. These captured between
them steamers ard 261 sailing
ships-qot very heavy bill of loss, o )
would think. Yet this loss practically
drove the United States flag from the
seas. To prove this, 1 will quote from
tic case Of the United States, as pre-
scntcd to the Geneva arbitrator, the
following facts: "In 1860 two-thi1ds Ct
the commerce Ct Now York wss carrie q
Gu ii American bottoms. III 1868 three
fou1ths was carried on i'll foreign bot
toms. " And the transfers from the
United States to tire British flag wert
-, e,,,xs, o,,,.l-- ,o-,.r Fl,,r ,r-c,o.
The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1896-06-03
Missed the Loveliest Jewel,

A story of the carnival shows that an
age Ct chivalry can ccexist with an ago
CT robbery. Nine. Charlotte T, q
Halles saleswoman and, moreover, a
widow, went out, as was only natural,
to have /. look at the procession. Sho
found on her return that her jewels had
been stolen in her absence, and as the
jewels were worth $500 it was a serious
loss. For all ills, however, there arc
compensations, and on the table the
thief had left note, brief indeed, but
gallant and gratifying to degree. "a
thousand regrets, 80 the note ran, $50,
not having found i'll this chamber by
far its most lovely jewel! Paris Mes
senger.