davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23
NO JOKE FOR THE JOKER.


NtdSts'
The practical joker was saunterina
along in the dusk. The inoffensfve citi.
zen was sauntering along in the same
dusk, unmindful of the presence of
the practical joker. The practica! Joker.
recognizing friend in the inoffensive
citizen, chuc>led to himself and quick,
ened himself to oyertalle him.
The inotfensive citizen was thinking
Of a story he had read about footpadS
and wondering whether anyone would
ever try to hold him up. The practical
joker suddenly tipped the inotfensive
citizens hat over his eyes. The in
offensive citizen wheeled instantly and
landed a fine, large blow between the
practical joller's eyes. The practical
joker went down. The inof1ensiye citi-
zen promptly sat on him and hit him
again The practical joker yelled:
For heavens sake don't hit me again,
John! Don't you know me-"
The inoffensiye citizen said: Great
Scott"
The practical joker said. in an in
iured tone: Hang it all, John, it's only
a joke
The inoffensive citizen looked at the
practical joker, who now had one eye
closed, and laughed. The practical
joker angrily asserted that it was no
laughing matter.
But you said it was joke" returned
the inoffensive citizen, land | think you
are right" And he laughed again But
the practical joker hasn't been able to
see the point of it to this day. Still, it
was unquestionably a good joke.-Tit-
Pits
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23


81. Louis Republic, January :, 1896.
One of the largest institutions in this State
Is the Stark Bros Nurseries and Orchards
company at Louisiana, Mo-, and ROCkpOrt,
III. The trade of the firm extends not only
throughout the United States, Canada, Ger
many, France, Italy, Hungary and other
foreign countries, but II has number OF GUS
toners both in New Zealand and Australia.
Eighty years ago there came from Ken
lucky to Pike county The late Judge Stark,
then Young man fresh from Old Hickory's
New Orleans campaign. He started the
nursery and planted the first grated or
chard in the state, having brought the sclons
on horseback from Kentucky.
The business has descended from father
to son, and is now conducted by the third
generation, assisted by the fourth. This
firm has more than ,OO0traveing solicitors,
and employs more people in its offices than
would be necessary to run large manufac-
turing concern The extensive packing
houses of the company are adjacent to the
city, connected with the railroad by special
tracks. From these packing houses hun
dreds of carloads Of trees are shipped an
nually. The nursery grounds embrace a
number of farms convenient TO the city, and
even extend to Rockport, HIS, where there
is a plant of several million trees.
The peculiarly of the concern is the
establishment of large orchards. These
orchards in "a states aggregate nearly 30,
600 acres, and more than 3,3OOOO0 trees on
the partnership plan. The firm is also in
tereSted in about as many more trees on the
cooperative arrangement.
Louisiana firms have more travelling men
upon the road for them than any other city
Of the world of its siz This, of course, is
largely due to the large number of men en-
pOycd by the Stark Bros. Nurseries, who
furnish their men the most complete, up-tO-
date outfit ever issued They are increasing
their force of statesmen daily, and room for
more,
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

Professor ia English to young MANI
How would you puRctuate the follow
ing: The beautiful girl, for such she
was, was passing down the street"
STUDENT think, professor, would
make i dash after the beautiful girl
Woonsccket Reporter.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23
Reason for Everything,

Margaret-Don't you think Maude
loved Charlie?
Ethel-No, dear; it is my firm belief
that she only married him for his beau
tiful collection of striped outing shirts.
Philadelphia North American.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

Slice raw bananas, add butter, sugar,
allspice and vinegar or boiled cider or
diluted jelly; bake with two crusts.
Cold boiled sweet potatoes may be used
instead of bananas, and are very nice.--
y. y. Ledger.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

Mrs. Scorcher-I thank heaven for
one thing, at any rate.
Mr.. Scorcher-What's that?
You cant say | don't ride wheel
like your mother used to.--N. Y. Com
mercial Advertiser.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

Nothing can be more crisp than let
tucc sandwiches, Spread buttered
slices of bread with salad dressing and
place between small lettuce leaves
Housekeeper.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

"WHEKE uocs the weather forecast man
go for his vacltion" He doesn't go any
where: he doesn't dare to come down out Of
that tower. "-Chicago Tribune.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

People overlooked the Importance of per.
maneutly beneficial effects and We're salts
fed with transient action: but now that it
is generally known that Syrup Of Figs viii
permanently overcome habitual constipa-
ton, well-iniormed people will not buy
other laXatives, which act for time, but
finally injure the system.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23
Low Rate Excursions South.

On the first and third Tuesday Of each
month till October about half-rates for
round trip will be made to points
in the South by the Louisville s, Nash
about it, and if he cannot sell you excur-
sion tickets write to c. ?. Atmore, Cen
eral Passenger Agent, Louisville, Ky, or
jackson Smith D. P. A., Cincinnati. 0.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

FITS stopped free and permanently cured.
No fits after first days use of DR.. Kline's
Great Nerve Res orer. Free 50 trial bottle
q treatise DIR. KLINE. 1873 Arch st. Phila Pa
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

wax for polished foorsE' Clcrk-''No; we
only have sealing wax" Mrs Nuwed-
"Well, that will do. If it's for the ceiling 1
suppose it will do for the floor ustas weAF'
Washington Times.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

To COMPLETE the Collat on.-She (senti~
mentally)-''l would ! were a bird" He
(stupidly) -"And what would | be-" She
tsarcastically) oh, you might be small
bottle. ''-ChicagO Record
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

"N1Iss OLpUN is one old maid w 10 doesn't
try to conceal her age" Eyes, but she
knows it's no use" ''Why?" Her twin
brother lives with er."-Chicago Record
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

RED. angry eruptons yield to the action
of Glenn S Sulphur Soap.
Hills Hair and Whiskcr Dive. so cents.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

He who goes no further than bare Justice
stops at the beginning of virtue.-Blair.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

ARTIFICE is weak; it is the work of mere
man, in the imbecility and self-distrust o.
his mimic understanding.-Har
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

PIso's Cure for Consumption has no equal
as a COugn medicine.-F. NJ Abb tt, 1913
Seneca St, Buffalo, N. Y, May 8, 1894.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

IDLENEss is only the refuge of weak
minds, and the holiday of fools.-Chester-
field
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23
"OLO STATE OF PIKE"

The Home of the Stark Brothers Nur-
series One of the biggest Institutions
in the World-Its Trade Extends to
Nearly Every Civilized Nation on Earth.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

THE most enviable of all titles, the char
acter of an honest MANY ashingtOn.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

Halls Catarrh Cure
Is a Constitutional Cure. Price 75c.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1896-07-23

WE initiate only what we believe and all
mire.-Willmott
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
Paid For the Pleasure,

During a journey Of the Emperor 10
seph II to Italy the wheels of his coach
broke down on the road, SO that it was
with difficulty that he reached small
village at short distance. On his ar.
rival there his majesty got out at the
door of the only blacksmith shop in the
town and desired him to repair the
wheel without delay. "That I would
do willingly, replied the smith, "but
it being holiday all my men are at
church. The boy who blows the bellows
it not at home"
can excellent method then presents
Of warming oneself, y replied the en-
peror. who was unknown to the smith,
and he set about blowing the bellows
while the blacksmith forged the iron.
The wheel being repaired, 6 soils were
demanded for the job, but the emperor
gave ducats.
The blacksmith returned them to the
traveller, saying, "Sir, you have made
{. mistake, and, instead CT 6 soils, have
given me 6 pieces of gold which no one
in the village can change"
"Change them when. you can" said
the emperor. stepping into the carriage
IAN emperor should ray for spch II
pleasure rs that Of blowing the lei lows.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
Timber Land, Act June 3, 1873.
Notice for PubIicati,


United States Land Office Duluth Mimi.
May r. 1885,
Notice is hereby given that in compliance
with the provisions of the act of Congress of
June B. 1873 entitled IAN act for the sale of
timber lands in the States of California.
Oregon, Nevada and Washington Territory"
as extended to all the public land states by
act of August 4. 1892. Peter +. Mcdonald, of
Duluth, County of St Louis State of Mime
sofa, has this day filed in this Office his sworn
statement No. 2909 for the purchase of the
lot and ne IA of Sc IA. Sec % and lot 5 in
TIP. No. SO n, Range No. IA w. 4th p. m. and will
offer proof to show that the land sought
is more valuable for its timber and stone
than for agricultural purposes and to
establish his claim to said land before
the register and receiver of this office at
Duluth. Mimi. on Tuesday, the 18th day Of
August. 1886.
He names as witnesses: Edward Helm.
Neil Bowie. Donald Cameron and John
Donovan, all of Duluth Minnesota.
Any and all persons claiming adversely the
above described lands are requested to file
their claims in this Office on or before said
18th day of August, 1856.
A. J. TAYLOR. Register
J. II. Sharp, Atty. Duluth Mimi. 5-27-7-29
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
Notice.

Notice is hereby given that the Of
flclal plats OF survey of township 151
north, range % west of 9TH p. M, will
be opened for filing in this office on
wednesday, July Is, 1896, at a. m;
township 1872 north of range % west
OF 9th p. M, on Thursday July 16,
1896, at 8 a. M; township l52 north of
range Il west of 9Th p. M, on Friday,
July II, 1896, at 9 a. m.,; township &c
north of range IA west Of 4th D. M, on
Tuesday, July 81, 1896, at 9 M:
township 60 north of range "a west of
18th p. M, on Wednesday, July %. 1896
at a. M; township "a north of range
~ west OF 4th p. M, on Thursday,
July %, 1896, at 9 a. M; township IS
north of range Is west of 4th p. M, on
Friday July "a, 1896, at 8 a. m.,; and
township So north of range II west of
4th p. M, on Tuesday, July %, 1896,
at a. m.; and that on and after said
days we will receive applications for
the entry OF lands in said townships,
Duluth MIMI, June 5, 1896
A. j. TAYLOR, Register.
f. l.. RYAN, Receiver.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
ENGLISH CAVE JEWELLERS.

Evidences of Them Found In the Region
Made Merry by Robin Hood.
The town of Nottingham is 1874 miles
north of London. A part of the town is
on low lying ground close to the river
Trent, where floods sometimes occur,
but the rest of the town is built on a
series of red sandstone hills. It is sit
uated on the southeastern fringe of the
great Derbyshire coal field, and the
historic forest of Sherwood formerly
spread almost up to the city walls.
Now this forest has. in a great measure.
been cut down, and this has reduced the
rainfall, raised the temperature and
: rendered the climate of the town drier
and more bracing than it used to be.
The mean annual rainfall is now 80
inches and the temperature ~ degrees.
AS sandstone is soft and easily cut it is
only natural that the early jewellers in
caves came and lived in holes dug in
the hills of Nottingham, particularly
as the forest close at hand was good
hunting ground where game could be
captured for food.
Bronze and other tools employed by
these early and prehistoric inhabitants
are occasionally found, and the first
name known to have been given to the
place was Snotingaham. This in Celtic
means 'the home among the rocks !"
Afterward it became one of the towns
of the kingdom of Mercia, and in the
ninth and tenth centuries was one OF
the five chief northern strongholds of
the Danes Already what is now known
as the Castlehill was strongly forti-
fed position, and it was in his attempt
to capture this fortress that Alfred the
Great was signally defeated by the
Danes. Two hundred years later, when
William the Conqueror in his turn SUBJ
jugated the Saxons, he rebuilt the cas-
tie of Nottingham and placed it under
the command Of his natural son, Will
liam Peverel.
But it was here also that Saxon re-
sistance continued for many long
year, for it was in the great forest hard
by that Robin Hood and his merry men
dwelt. These outlaws were Saxons who
were dissatisfied with the Norman rule
and preferred life of brigandage to
submission. The holes dug in the rocks,
the passages made through the sand
stone mountains, enabled these bold for
esters to occasionally appear in the
town and close under the Norman bat
Elements Boston Post.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
The BURLINGTON
ROUTE.

IN PAST YEARS we have published in
papers from week to week. short articles
on various subjects. scientific historical
geographical, and all of them have been
interesting.
THIS YEAR The Burlington wants to use
our space in telling you more directly
about its line. SO these articles will not
appear in the newspapers They Will
however: be written and printed regular
ly, and if you want them during 1906 send
your name and address to the General
Passenger Agent as below and you will
receive by mail each month a sheet con-
tanning the articles for that month.
MEANWHILE the finest and foStest trains
in the west are via The Burlington from
ST. Paul and Minneapolis to Chicago.
st. Louis and all other prominent cities
and towns East and South.
TICKETS and particulars as to routes and
rates of fare will be furnished by your
home agent, or il he cannot supply them
address,
W. j. G. KENYON,
Gen. Freightand Pass. Agt
st, Paul. Mimi
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
Timber Land, Act June 3, 1873.
Notice for Publication.

United States Land Office, Duluth. Mimi.
April II. 1895
Notice is hereby given that in compliance
with the provisions of the act of congress of
June 3. 1878. entitled AN act for the sale of
timber lands in the States OF California.
Oregon. Nevada. and Washington Territory
as extended to all the Public Land States by
act of August 4. 1892. David Buttars, of West
Superior. county of Douglas, state of Wiscon-
sin. has this day filed in this office his sworn
statement No 2977. for the purchase of the
So of NE1-4 of sec 30 in tip. 50, r. IA west
and will offer proof to show that the land
is more valuable for its timber and stone
than for agricultural purposes, and to estab-
lish his claim to said land before the register
and receiver OF this Office at Duluth, Mimi
OnMOnday the 9th day Of Jul y. 1856
He names as witnesses; Thomas Leonard
a: L. Lee. and VIM. Meaney of West Superior.
Wis. and w. HI. Long, of Tower. MINI.
Any and all persons claiming adversely
the above described lands are requested to
file their claims in this Office on or before
said 9th day of July, 1886.
4-227-1 A. j. Taylor. Register
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
BAD BILLS BREAK.
1t Was Sensational Feature and Shut Up
the Whole Revival.

1t Was Sensational Feature and Shut Up
the Whole Revival.
Bad Bill was we'll known charac-
ter III the west, and there are many
stories told of his exploits, but one Of
the best has never been printed, and
was related to reporter by a man who
was present when it occurred.
Great Bend, Kan, now one of the
best towns in the state, was at one time
about the worst That was when it was
g railroad terminus before Dodge City
was established.
A travelling evangelist went to Great
Bend and tried to start a revival. There
were few Christians in town, ard
these all attended the first meeting, the
only one Of the unregenerate present be-
ing Bad Bill, who took a front seat.
Every one feared trouble when he walk
ed into the church, but he sat quietly
during the exhortation. The evangelist
requested all who wanted to Ito hea-
ven to stand up, and every person pres
cnt except Bill arose. When they were
seated again, Bill got up, and, drawing
two pistols, said:
''You say you want to go to heaven.
Now, anything l can do to help this
game along and give pleasure to the
players, I'm in for. You ali want to go
to heaven, and I'll give you as good a
chance as you'll ever have Tie Grst
man that gets up I'll give him a ticket
clean through, without any stop overs. !"
The evangelist crawled under a seat
and the members of the congregation
laid on the chairs.
"Well," said Bill, 81 see you WASH t
i'll earnest, SO we'll put out the lights
and call this meeting adjourned One
by one he shot out the lights, and by
morning the evangelist was ON has way
to Hutchinson, while the members Of
the congregation kept quiet ard made
no further attempts at holding revi
val. -Washington Star.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
Timber Land, Act June 3, 1878.
Notice for Publication.
United States Land Office. Duluth. Mimi.
June Is 1896.

United States Land Office. Duluth, Mimi.
June Is, 1886.
Notice is hereby given that in compliance
with the prov isiuns of t:ie act of Congress OF
June !. 1873. entitled AN act for the sale of
timber lands in the states of California.
Oregon, Nevada and Washington Territory"
as extended to all the Public Land states by
act of August T. 1892. Thomas }. Leonard, of
West Superior, county OF Douglas, state OF
Wis. has this day filed in this office his sworn
statement No. 1926, for the purchase of the
VIZ of SW4 and SEA Of SWA of sec
ton 20 Township 80. Range west
Of 4th D, M. and will offer proof to show
that the land sought is more valuable for its
timber and stone than for agricultural pur-
poses, and to establish his claim to said land
before the Register and Receiver of this
office at Duluth Minnesota. on Monday,
the It'll day of september. 1886.
William Norton. of Duluth. Mimi, and Ed
Rathwell, of Hibbing. Minn..and W. IL. Long,
of Tower, Mimi
Any and all persons claiming adversely the
above described lands are requested to file
their claims in this office on or before said
18th day of September 1886.
6-24 8-26 A. j. TAYLOR Register.
G. p. Maginnis, Attorney for claimant.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
LEGAL PLEA FOR HER HAND.
Able Argument Of Counsel Involving Per-
sonal Interests.

Able Argument of Counsel Involving Per-
sonal Interests.
The judges daughter was perturbed.
Papa" she said, knitting her pref
ty brow, II am in doubt as to whether
I have kept to the proper form OF pro-
cedure. In law one can err in SO many
little technicalities that am ever fear
full. Now, last evening George
The Judge looked at her SO sharply
over his glasses that she involuntarily
paused.
81 thought you had sent him about
his business" he said.
81 did hand down an adverse deci-
sion, :" she answered, "and he declared
that he would appeal. However, I con-
WINGED him that was the court of last
resort in case like that and that mo
appeal would lie from my decision. ''S
POSSIBLY the court was assuming
little more power than rightfully be-
longs to it, said the judge thoughtfnll-
~, "but let that pass What did he do
then?'
"He filed petition for rehearing. F"
''The usual course" said the judge,
"but it is usually nothing but a mere
formality."
$50 I thought, returned the girl,
"and was prepared to deny it without
argument, but the facts set forth in his
petition were sufficient to make me hes
itate and wonder whether his case had
really been properly presented at the
first trial.
"Upon what grounds did he make the
applications" asked the judge, scowling
''Well," she replied, blushing lit
tie, "you see, he proposed by letter, and
his contention was that the case was of
that peculiar character that cannot be
properly presented by briefs, but de-
mands oral arguments. The fact that
the latter had been omitted, he held,
should be held to be an error, and the
point was such novel one that Icon
sented to let him argue it. Then his ar
gument was so forceful that granted
his petition and consented to hear the
whole case again. Do you think"-
81 think" said the judge, "that the
court favors the plaintiff. Chicago
Post.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
BSCRIBE FOR
THE ELY MINER.
Notice for Publication.
Land Office at Duluth, Mimi. Nav 13

Land Office at Duluth, Mimi, May ID. 1896
Notice is hereby given that the following
named settler has filed notice of his inten-
ton to make final proof in support of his
claim: and that said proof will be made be-
fore the register and receiver of the U. s.
land office Mt Duluth, Mimi, on July 8. 1896,
viz:
Lyman /. Kornield, who made homestead
and Lots 8, Z 3 and 8 of section - and NW VI,
OF NW4 of section u. Tp 63 N. of X. I3W.
He names the following witnesses to prove
his continuous residence upon and cuitiya-
ton of said land, viz:
Chas M. Leith. George B. Clark Terance
Butt and James Bloomenson, all of Ely.
Mimi.
- 5-2O 6-24 A. j. TAYLOR Register.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
Notice for Publication.

Land Office at Duluth. Mimi, May Is. 1896.
Notice is hereby given that the following
named settler has filed notice of his inten-
tion to make final proof in support of his
claim. and that said proof will be made be-
fore the Register and Receiver of the U. S.
Land Office at Duluth. Mimi. on July %. 1896.
viz. Eliza Maud Trythal nee Whiteside. who
made H. Z. No. 1868 for ne of NV of Sec. "A,
Tp. So n, II. 12W 4 p. m.
He names the following witnesses to prove
his continuous residence upon and cultiva-
uion of said Land, viz:
Forbs Harris. John Densmore. VIM.
Stephens ard Chas. Merrill all of Ely. Mimi.
5-27-6-l Al. TAYLOR. Register.
The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1896-07-08
She Was an Abstainer.

A lady, who is strict prohibition
ist, was one of private party at Fair:
view last summer. They were taking
supper in the pavilion, and had given
orders, when one of the gentlemen turn
ed to her and said:
"Will you have some piepercut, Mrs.
X.Y'
She drew herself up rigidly aud felt
grossly insulted
"No; thank you, sir, :" she said. 81
never drink anything stronger than lem
onade.
Then the gentleman pointed to the
post, and, while the rest of the crowd
laughed, she read:
"Pie, per cut, 8 cents. ''-Indianapo-
lis Sentinel.