The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-03-29

lARCH 30 1896
that tomorrow morning you may nave =
baadage over one eye. The cniiureh VIM
be SO sorry because you got UP IN the
night and struck 1t against the door. nc
servants will wink at each other. AZ
night, when your husband comes hoiho
sober, he will bring you new gown VI
a new brooch or some pretty URINE ia
the way OF jewelry-but none or his siI's
can fade out that black eye Inc chances
are that you are loving and iors'ins
woman, but how can you keep on loving
a man who would strike you whether
drunk or sober? That blow Is the some
thing" that begins to make you WONDER
whether you do really care for nin- but
he is the father of your children-'no
ideal of your girihood-and somehow III
your love there comes great pity anu
although strong minded women Wouiu
blame you, you love him and care LOT
him as you might for one OF your chh-
dren. Your love ceases 10 be that Won
derful one which should exist between
husband and wife. but becomes instead
maternal I'm its character and your atu-
tude toward him. this man who prom
ised TO take care OF your, is that Oh
mother toward a naughty child
There are vicious husbands, thoughtiess
husbands mean husbands, ill-tempered
husbands, but between you ana me, my
dear little woman, there Is no husband
quite as bad as the all-around 1901. lie
never does or says the right thins' ne
never appears TO advantage and no mat
ter how kind Of heart you may announce
that he Is, lookers-on do not hesitate 10
say that he IS wonderfully weak or brain.
4 ,a
would rather be beaten by man with
some intelligence than adored by fool,
aud that is one Of the things that makes
mo glad / am woman. Even II one Is
a fool ones self, one does not want 10
marry "A fool and go on populating the
world with fools for ever and for ever.
Bah ARGUES AGAINST DIVORCE.
She asked me another question-did this
little woman who wrote the charming let
ter. She said, do you believe In d.
vorce2" l wish knew how TO say NO
so loudly that IL would reach the ears OF
each woman who bad ever thought or H.
and convince them that one Of these Won
derful new guns was near her, and tnat
she was struck by one OF the five hundred
shots that they sent out every minute.
Sometimes, between two married people
things reach such point that II Is wiser
for them TO separate; 10 live apart ana
10 lead lives that give no scandal. But
the divorce-oh. no, once woman IS d.
vorced from one man and marries an
other she becomes demOralized and falls
TO see why she may not continue the d.
vorcing and the remarryine as long as
she ploases. She forgets that the day
will come when the only bloom on her
cheeks Is an artificial one. when the
beautiful hair is false. when the eyes
have lost their glow, and she Is tired OF
life. What viii she think about then?
Always Of her first love. She remem-
hers that II she had not been so easily
irrtafed about this. so suspicious about
that, or 80 determined about something
else she might stiii be an honored wife.
II IS a beautiful thing. to my way OF
thinking. 20 see two people. no longer
young. the woman no longer beautiful
from that standpoint that demands rosy
checks, bright eyes and sunny locks,
| happy with each other. OF course they
have had their misunderstanding; OF
course there have been times when 10
seemed 10 each as If the other could no
| longer be endured, but then one OF the
two remembered the vows they had
| taken, and yielded, and so all life was
made smoother and they grew gradually
| TO understand just what each liked best
| what each most enjoyed; and. although
| the big world was around them. Il was
outside them; and love and peace reigned
| I'm the little world made by these two
In my friends little letter she said,
what would you do If the man you
| loved cared for another woman J shall
not answer her. but / will let n learned
man tell her what ne thought. DR.. john
son said that he would never receive back
| to his home daughter whose complaint
was that her husband had been unfaith-
ful to her; and his reason for this was.
| that n husband had been nnfaithful "
was the wife's own fault. since she had
not succeeded IN pleasing him.
REFORMED BY HIS WIFE.
| 7 wonder IL l have said all there Is
about bad husbands? / don't like to at
tack the men. They have always been
] good and kind TO me, and l am forced 10
Judge them By what ] see OF them. Ny
| friend you may take 1t as truth, that
two people are required to make a happy
| home. Many a bad husband has been
unconsciously reformed by his wjfe's
! wisdom.
/ don't like TO say that women ever
| need reformation. But there are bad
| husbands. Else women wouldn't be glad
when they went off in the morning and
didn't return until night. But so much IS
/ In the hand or the woman. Man ID tNe
lower animal. To be quite honest. / have
never been quite sure whether he vas
above or below the monkey. SO it Is In
| the finer better nature Of woman 10
train him I'm the way he should go. To
| train him 10 be more gentle; TO be more
affectionate; more generous and less
fault-hnding. / don't believe there IS any
redemption for the sullen or the stingy
man. However, 1t is pleasing to think
| that he will have a hereafter. and / can
imagine that heaven, to some women
will mean looking down 70 where their
husbands are. and reminding them of the
past. Ii would be a rather nasty thing
10 do: still, there would be a certain
satisfaction about II. and no woman could
be blamed for doing IL who had lived
with a man who was all-round horrid.
But then there are so many good men
And nice men. And lovable men. And
considerable men. And unselfsh men
And generous men. And among these
there ought 10 be a man pleasing 10 thai
nice little woman and her neighbor and
Bah.