The record-union., 1896-06-28
A QUESTION OF ATMOSPHERE.
Home Training Largely Question of
Absorption.


Said a mother one day, very wearily:
II am worn out with responsibility
Everything l do may be the wrong
thing for my children; everything l fail
to do may hurt them and hinder their
development. Sometimes, with the poor
passionate mother whom Zangwill de-
scribes so finely in The Master l feel
inclined to throw up the position Not
tc destroy myself-far from it, but to
stop living every hour of the day with
my children's welfare as direct and
imperative object; to stop watching
every word they say and every step
they take and every breath they draw
l have very little comfort with my
children, yet / love them to distrac-
ton
Yes" answered a wise old woman,
who had placidly played the part of
listener to this monologue, yes, dear,
I've noticed that you have a hard time
of it, and certainly the children, poor
things, have not an easy time. Chill
dren never have an easy time when
their parents regard them chiefly as
clay to be nodded, as instruments to be
played upon. The fortunate children
are those who are brought up with a
large admiNture of wholesome neglect"
But, dear lady" said the mother,
"am 1 to pass over Harry's quarrels
with Ned, and Ned's tale-telling, and
Leila's gusts of rage, and her sisters
tendency to be late and lazy. as though
the four children were admirable in
conduct? They ought to be admirable;
they've been reproved enough. but they
have happy faculty of forgetting
even punishment. 1 wish 1 could be
trihe easier and less anxious about
their morals and manners"
If, said the other, you could only
realize that home training is largely a
question of absorption, of unconscious
assimilation, you would have fewer mo-
ments of sorrowful uncertainty. Your
own general temper, your face, your
tones, the pretty gowns you wear, the
gay little songs you sing, and the sto-
ries you tell at twilight, the tender
brooding that is never absent from
your loving heart and from your man
ner, these are the things which edu-
cate your children. They resist positive
orders, and are sometimes rebelliouS in
their hearts when commands are given
brusquely and enforced with sternness,
but no child resists the sunshine. Praise
is worth more than blame in bringing
up our little ones and reward outweighs
penalty. Look at the children of our
friends, the Blossomsons, for example.
They seem to do only what they please
Hildegrade Blossomson marshals her
little flock and takes them to the gar
dens and they play and read and rornp
till their mother calls them in; they are
always happy, healthy and good. Their
| life is an unfolding in a sweet sunny
realm, the result of contact with good
| influences, of a refined and charming
| household life-in short, of atmos-
phere."
The mother sighed. II never could be
so careless as Mrs. Blossomson, and
my children are not as gentle by nature
as hers. There is Harry pushing Ned
down and taking away his drum. Har-
ry! Harry" she cried, stop that in
stantly, or I'll call you into the house!'
| The wise old woman smiled and
sighed. There is no hope for the mother
who rules by threatening and in whose
vocabulary cor I'll do so,'' has a fixed
place But it takes half a lifetime for
those who have in their hands the train
irg of the next generation to find out
just how to do what ought to be done,
| 10 learn 10 ADJUST HlCely tHe pdIdHceS
! between the mistakes of inexperience
and the willfulness of perverse inten-
tions. The blunders of parents are
among the saddest things in life-all the
sadder that the consequences of such
| blunders are often far-reaching and ir-
| eparable.-Harper's BaZar.
|
| A dream about dice means a speedy
| eStrangement from some very dear
| friend.