davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
BILL NYE,S CAREER.

To the man whose riSibieS have 10
be raped. the career Of Bill Nye must
always appear 10 be a failure. To the
man who expects humOr - hunt him
down and force him To laugh, al hu-
moriSts Will be failures.
Two or three thousand definitions,
epigrammatic and prOlix, have been
given OF humor. But probably the best
explanation Of the power that man.
alone Of all animal kingdom has. =
found in the fact that humoF results
from the meeting of the intention 10
amuse and the willingness 70 be
amused.
Al the same time both minds. posi-
tive and negative. which create hu-
morous current. must be advised Of the
mlnuJest details and conditions Of the
subject which IS to BE- given a humor-
Gus trend.
In describing q cyclone Bill Nye once
said: Il was riding through the forest.
The wind was gently soughing through
the trees. Presently I noticed that
was also Souchin= through the trees.
al about sixty miles per souEh-
IL would be- useless 10 expect . man
who had never felt anything stronger
than a zephyr 10 grasp this or % ser
anything particularly funny about d.
But the man who mas experienced the
rapid. unannounced and violent ad-
vent 81 q cyclone VIII have 10 trouble
in giving each word used full credit
for the idea which IL seeks 20 convey
But outside II bis hHmor, which VIII
die Of course. Just a. RsbelaiS'- Laur-
ence SteTue's, josh Billings. Petroleum
Nasty and ArJemus Wards have oied
before ii. outside of the fun BE- has
made BIZ Nye ali through hls desui-
lcry writings has pGncJured TIE bloated
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
Ihc adeaia aily Eagle Sunday oro sebruaru 25 1895
who sympathized with the Indian and

who sympathized with the Indian and
who was ever extending him help with
che hand while he was wiping him
from the face of the earth with the
other. Even up TO the hour OF the
/ admission of Kansas, as a state, the
Indian owned or was Ia possession OF
! the greater portion of its domain. But
( there remains not a single Indian res
ervatien il the state verify the name.
Down in the heart Of the Indian Ter
ritory but a sheTt time since a little
! square CT government lands became oe-
| eupied as Oklahoma. To-day Okla
h9ma possesses an area sufficient fog
! q sovereign state. The Indian. his re-
serves, claims, rights and treaties have
been disposed Of, ebliteFated. There.
however. Is the territories belonging TO
the so-called five tribes. The rights
and titles to these reservations We're
held 10 be inviolate. But a Dawes
commission was appointed, net, per Sc,
to extinguish these tribes nor get te
rob them, but rathtr to regulate them
and confirm them in their rights. So
we have bill inspired by the Dawes
commission introduced in congress,
which bill, when it becomes a law, viii
be the first step in the disintegratlea
Of the remaining Indian nations Ia the
territory, which domain Will then rap
idly sweep into the control Of the white
man. SO the Creeks, CheFokees. Chec-
taws, Chlckasaws and Seminoles will
lose their tribal rights and relations
and soon disappear as a facter, and
their country viii become the white
mans "Indianola" or a part OF Okla
hOma.
These FIVE nations control 21O00
square miles Of territory. The iRhab-
itantS are about $4,000 Indians and
100000 so-called whites They have
churches. schools, a judiciary, a legis-
lature and are a rude crude government
de factO. But the whites do not own
the lands, hence that which is sure to
happen and soon.
The situation is unique. These ma
tons are foreign powers in many res
spects yet wards of the national gov
eminent, while the whites among them
are aliens under the Indian laws.
While the whites have no legal right
or status there they in fact rule, rule
TO ruin in one sense, rule to revOlu-
tiCniZe in every other. The poor In
dian looks stolidly, helplessly on, by
turn in alarm appealing to the letter Of
his parchment treaties, at other times
threatening or begging. But all he
can do will amount TO nothing. SO far
as the Dawes commission is concerned
or the general government either, the
white intruderS might all be banished.
But that will not be, simply because
such a course would be against the
logic of events, against all experience
and history. The Indian must simply
succumb to the inevitable and become
just what IS determined for him. The
allotment scheme means in the end, In
the near future. white ownership what |
ever may be declared to the contrary. |
White ownership means in turn the |
and extinction of the In
dian,
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
PUGILIsTIC POINTERS.

A certain element watch the progress
of the pugiIiStic world closely. A large
element do not. To this latter ele-
ment a word OF explanation at this
time may be necessary, as a great event
has just occurred in the pugilistic cir
cles. which the element which pays no
attention to prlzefghts may have over
looked
The Right Hon. James Fitzsimmons,
to use the polite language of the ring,
has just by Il def blow on the chin,
knocked the back-end of the jaw of
Mr.. Peter Maher back into the base Of
his cerebellum, or antebellum, 10 be
more precise. Whereupon Mr.. Peter
Maher suspended operations and be
came ss limp as a water-sOaked dish
rag in July. Some time previous TO
this Mr.. COrbe,t, a former champion
of the world. retired from the ring and
gave the belt to Slr. Maher According
10 the rules of pugilism this belt now
passes by the right Of eminent domain
or something Of that sort % Mr.. Fitz-
simmons. Now Mr.. COrbett appears
and wants 10 fight Mr. Fitzsimmous.
This IS the present stage OF pugilism
in the world, and all the general pub
lie should know. There are several
choice scandals in regard 10 Mr. Cor
betr. and Mr.. Fitzs.mmons Is not IN
derstoOd 20 be quite ready 70 pull Of
this terrestrial sphere without danger 10
himself. All great men, however. have
been the objects Of small talk similar
10 this. when their backs were turned.
and ir would De- unusual II either Mr.
Corbett or Mr.. Fits .mmODs should es-
cape IT,
For. the world 81 large. which is not
particularly Interested in pUgilism. and
in the graceful language IN which the
gentlemen of the ring c0ndue; it, should
understand that Nr. Co-bett and M
FiizsimmOns ara dead game sports and
are hot stuff FOR your blooming wits
kers and ss tine beauts as you exer
laid your blooming lamps on. See: -
until De big NIL comes OF you blokes
want 20 get your HOOKS u all de papers
and glue your blooming lamps 90 De
news q d. Sports See
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

tons Of England touching her South
African claims, that England fell back
ON the Monroe" doctrine. and that Bis
marck himself alluded to it as an in
ternauonal law. England's applica-
ton OF the doctrine. however. was in
excelsis. Johnny BulldozeF set out
] that whereas England held TO Il pro-
vince in Africa no other power could
set up any claims in his immediate Vi
einity without his consent.
England is for any policy which com
prehends land grab. Her plan for
! centuries has been TO make a claim
first then draw a map covering the
/ claim and after a lapse of years fan
back on the map. According 10 the
London Graphic ON this principle. Eng
land is now claiming the whole OF
Greenland and all the supposed country
| lying between the United States and
the North Pole. This policy has been
employed in Alaska; where Britains
absurd claims are based upon a Cana
dian map made less than fifteen years
age, which is entirely at variance with
the description IN treaties which has
been recognized by both Canada and
England for sixty years. The Graphic
publishes a map of the world, indicat-
Ing in dense black territory over which
Great Britain claims empire. While
unofficial, this map curiously illustrates
the British grab-aH policy. Upon IL all
Northern Greenland. and all the terri
tory lying west Of Smiths Sound. even
to the undiscovered regions. are indi-
Gated as belonging to the British en-
pire.
This will be interesting to geOgraph-
erS and photographers the world over.
1t Is especially interesting in view of
the proposition of Senator Lodge that
the United States should acquire all the
Danish islands in the Western hemi-
sphere, and in addition TO the almost
essential acquisition of st. Thomas, St
Croix and St John, that we should Sc
cure Greenland In the same transac-
ton. Denmark's claim to the whole
OF Greenland is generally accepted. but
If discovery is held to constitute owner
ship, certainly the continuous explora-
tons and discovery by citizens of the
United States such as Hayes, Kane.
Hall, Greedy and Peary, make Northern
Greenland more properly our territory
than England's. The Monroe doctrine
Is in good, lusty condition just now, and
If necessary we will transfer its opera
lions from the Caribbean to Baftin's
Bay, as soon as it has accomplished its
perfect work in Venezuela.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
TILLMAN DEMOCRACY,

There is going To a lively time In the
Democratic national convention. not
that its choice OF candidate will count
one way or the other. but ever ques-
tons Of principle and policy. The Is
sue Will be shall the Democratic party
die gOldbug, or take the chances of re-
neWed life in indeTsing silver. The
leadership Of the Democratic party Is
more intensely goldbug than the lead
ership of the Republican party. while
upon the other hand the great body of
the former party seams more strongly
inclined to free silver than the rank
and file of the Republican party, The
Republican party will undoubtedly lis
for currency of bimetallism and paper
currency redeemable in both gold and
silver, on a Is To l basis. IL possible.
and the ultimate free coinage of both
metals. The leaders of the Democratic
party would rather go down than make
such a concession or 10 take a step in
that direction. Tillman of South Car
DINA, unquestionably represents the
great body of the Democratic party In
the south. 1illmaa openly declares
that if the Democratic party in ma
tional convention refuses to make con-
cessions to silver that the South Caro-
lima delegation will walk out. This
declaration has set the gOldbug Demo
cratic papers of New York and Boston
wild. while the Baltimore Sun vehem-
emily demands that this being the case
Mr.. Tillman must not be admitted to
the floor OF the national convention, he
nor his delegation. This would be
rough on Tillman. The Richmond
Va.) Times re-echoes the voice of the
Sun. declaring that the desertion of
Tillman ought to be welcomed by the
Democratic party, (which should jump
eagerly ut Tillman'S bait and seize the
opportunity TO rid the party of all such
burdens" But the principal cOnsid-
GRAFTON is to keep such men out Of the
convention altogether, if possible.
No doubt the Republican convention
VIII have its own trouble over the
problem. in trying to define,
In a satisfactory way to the west, just
what is meant by bimetallism, yet the
scene that will occur in the Democratic
national convention at Chicago when
the committee on resolutions shall have
made their majority and minority re-
ports can only be imagined, probably
never adequately described.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
THE GRAIN RATE FIGHT,

The late grain rate discrimination
against southern Kansas corn fields
was not as many have supposed, in
spired by railways leading to Atlantic
ports, but it is at bottom q fight insti-
gated by Kansas City, through lines
reaching New Orleans and Mobile.
Grain consigned to either of these last
two named points under the new sched-
ule is practically forced to Kansas City.
Whatever the Kansas City grain men
may do however, to the contrary, the
new deep water port at Galveston must
be given the same or equal rates per
ton per mile, leaving the advantage so
far as south Kansas and Oklahoma
grain fields are concerned, with Gal
weston because of the shorter haul. In
this fight all the railways of the Mis-
sisSippi valley running south have been
enlisted, and the Illinois Central has
been sending grain TO the mouth of the
Mississippi right from under the nose
of Chicago, so New Orleans is being
immensely benefited at the expense OF
the Kansas farmer, The New Orleans
papers continue to note the large in
crease in grain exports from that city.
The total shipments of corn from that
port for the month Of January reached
3,507, JOB bushels, compared with 9S7,-
39S bushels during January of last
year, an increase Of 2,519, 705 bushels.
There We're no less than forty-ni
shipments of corn, twelve of which ex-
ceeded 100 900 bushels each and one ex-
ceeded 100000 bushels. The bulk of
the corn went to Liverpool, but that
was not the only port to which it was
shipped. Rotterdam took four car
goes, Bremen four, Queenstown four,
three, Hamburg, Antwerp,
London, Havre, ROusn
and Progreso, Mexico, two each, with
single cargOes TO Naples, Dunkirk,
Hull, Lynn and Frederickshaven. The
comments: The trade
of New Orleans was never 50 extended; /
that is, it has never done a business
with SO many ports 50 far apart as it
has since the grain trade drifted here"
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
.ination out

the sentiment for Longs denomination out
/ its way is unanimous.
| Lon Wilson OF Hutchinson. denies that
I he and his wife attended dance and left
I the baby at home alone
/ A railroad man a. Arkansas City has
I figured out that the average freight car
travels 1900 miles a year.
Andy Richards confsSses that II was the
reported discovery OF gold near there that
originally brought him % Wellington.
j. 9. Pollock. who looks more Ike a
statesman than any other man IN CoxIey
county. is candidate Tor the appellate
bench
The saiina Republican beEs Morriilnot %
Sacrifice the party by running again. The
Republican says Central Kansas Will no.
vote for him.
Lyman SauEle OF Wellington. " - sail
VIII get the domination Tor secretary of
state from the PopuHs,s. II the present
slate - not broken
A =. Parker. one % welHnRton's law
yers. has moved 70 Cripple Creek 10 en-
gage In TIE practice Of la~ ard PICK Cd
nuggets on the side.
The Caldwell News says ;hat a com
plainr reaches that once from a prayer
meeting. which charges that a Einxinr
society "a the next township aisturbs ia
deyouons.
CongressnnaH Kirkpatrick of the Thru
district VII distribute uny thossanJ
copies % his speech on pensions in con.
Eress az a slight testimonial q ne fact
ihat ne would IKE 10 10 reelected
Mort As6auz5. who r. close % Morrill,
says that g foeEn't take much religion
for anyone % occupy a Wichita pylrit
Probably Ho-riu has toi1 AlhauRh Ao~
i"o wichita DreacAers worked him.
inflelJ and Arxa8s4s CRY are always
Sighting. Sow Cal1~sI ard WsllaK,oa
are about 10 fal 90. hecsazs CzId1sI has
been given a E~p1bfican srportorussaf
basel on q cand.1ate which Calszel hep
e % cefeat
The Ferth Debating society sfs~gsssd:
% Resolved. That q f'r-Hou VIII CO F.rshsr
f9r Love Taaa Money Ths b1ze-s car
r-e1 the meeting ~ sto-vn- The Old 10
PIE VITO knew th4t loss do@sn-t sxist
dlca's attend
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
THREATENS KANSAS REPUBLICANS


Our much esteemed cotemporary the
Topeka Capital is kicking In the traces
As the prohibition organ Of the state Il
| IS aweary of its boss. the Rev, Richard
] Wake, who is also the director general
| Of the Morrill, ministerial state admin.
! iStratiOn. The Capital, having follow
| ed the wake of Mr.. Wake, awakeS to
/ the fact that the Rev. Richard has not
only lead the state administration be-
| yOGd its own party lines to destroy it,
but that he is now mobiliZing his forces
for the purpose of defeating the Re
publican party itself or otherwise
bringing it to his terms. The Capital
refers to Mr.. Wakes call for an
other convention as remarkable
circular" In this we are glad to agree
with the Capital While our esteem
ed contemporary has never failed or
tiinched as the chief champion of polit-
ical prohibition it does not relish the
idea OF being led away from the Re
publican party at whose table IL has so
sumpuouSly Jared for all these years.
Mr.. Wake could have the Capitals
hearty support so long as he was lead
ing the Republican party and its ad-
ADMINISTRATION back into the slough of in
terminable turmoil into which the
sanity hypocNte st. John first con
Quoted 1t, and from which IL escaped
for the first time in fifteen years in its
last state convention; but. when the
Rev. Richard wriggler attempts TO de
srOy the goose which has never failed
to lay golden eggs for the Capital the
gone feeling in the region of its
stomach affects its gall and it rises. in
protest The people of the state have
not forgotten that the secretary OF
Wakes State Temperance union re
signed in disgust i few months since.
declaring that the sorry scheme entire
was one of salaries for its head manip-
ulatorS. The secretary'S character for
truth and veracity having never been
impeached every body. outside of that
organization, accepted it as true. Our
esteemed contemporary seems astonish-
ed that this British importation should
assume the prerogative and the power
to break down the Republican party
Of Kansas II the CAPITAL had lived
under this mans rule as drivelled
through the drooling Dawes. as some
Of the rest Of Us have its present awak-
eninG might have proved less startling.
In the meantime it is kindly informed
that the sole aim and object Of this old
poruS plaster and political preacher.
Rev Richard Wake, next TO drawing
salary which he in no other way can
earn. Is 70 put the prohibition plank
back into The platform of the Republi-
can party. or otherwise 70 break the
party down. he caring not a whit which
80 he can continue 10 squeeze : liveIi-
hood our of it by just such methods as
the Capital is finally compelled 70 con-
denim.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

county, occasionally sees blue horse SAL
Ing around In the sky. No one else does.
Some weeks after an Usage dies a dane.
IS given. Until that dance takes place IN,
relatives OF the deceased must 20 naked.
A Populist paper In Oklahoma is al last
| satisfied 1t says Nix cleaned out the
| outlaws and the government cleaned out
| Nix.
William Rnipe Of Payne county was over
TO the Il Reno central committee meet
ing just rubberins around 20 SEQ what he
could see.
The Danderine company OF Guthrie 8
going to have hard work 10 prove that
their medicine was not the cause OF Bal
Nyes fatal Illness.
Henry Asp. IN contradiction OF all GUS
tom, invaded Rock Island territory by at
tending the Republican central committee
meeting a. ii Reno.
Dennis Flynn will be renominated two
days before April Fools day. The Guthrie
Leader should make 4 great point against
his election on account OF this.
Ardmore is already In the Reid for The
Corbett-F1tzslmm0nsp rizenght. The boys
there think they can pull b. of before
congress passes the Dawes bin
woman with a 2-m0n ths-oIf baby was
n Pond Creek the other day working
her rabbits foot on the merchants FOR the
price OF a railroad ticket % CALDWELL
4 man Offers so reward for the return
% stolen horse, and ths Pond Greek
videtts says there are plenty q people
who viii give him five stolen horses for
that amount
Attorney Decker % Guthrie has just had
an Iowa Indian boy released from tbs
Chilocco schools By wit OF habeas corpus.
The boy vas SICK. bus -Hs teachers
wouldn't le; him 10 home.
The divorce Industry leaves about s-sl
% = year e. Oklahoma city. And e
5oesz'- hurt ths town a BIZ Lei other
states reform and Oklahoma Vii not have
70 help them eass their Eoes.
At Cars5a's school house near Ok-aba-ra
city. his week a preacher announce -b.t
Re ~oalt answer al questions An s=aeal
got ~ and asSst him Z JOBS turksy, was
q hen o. = soools-- rot a.raos. re-
suited
Lots q Tragedies Occur p okIshors
where 10 name Occurs. Re-eatly near
o'Kesnz =. youns LADY committed sgieisa
- tsioaE poison because asr ps4safs o. .
jectsi % her uArriags. TIE pzpers priat
he item bgt give 70 names.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
ALONG TIE kansas NILE.

L>oooeh ard Harry Bone are carrying
-aeiT MARBLES IN one s@ex i-1sg a. rrsseat-
TIE sk.rIzrnln s-s-lon a. = Doraso naz
ecsiyas 400 pounds % mix evefv ~s@E
si-ss Mare Miller Is aoz doing ne heavy
taTl1 EDITORIAL ~ork on ths Bslse Pgalns
&eEA
TIE YaHsy STATE bark - Haic5irs11
las a0~ 81 20 TIE .-reorxsalEs 1sa~ sage
- ho2e
Tae beaver csszaf r. Bl81 creek b.
Sumner c9zaty 49, week zexsss ferry
eis1t gosz1s.
Ta7se po-rsz9oassats IL tss Wsl1ar,os
F9sae Feporl aaaoyeacs tr1zn ths r.sasly
hoNl q ceyute1
j. Is a "a, ;hai eAo's-a sss.-x 49,.
zzs never Sug~a "a haskeA eea-tv f.
zestera Ezasas
Tss PEAst cszag Es.ssaezz 80 .s.st
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
oELARo,rA ourLIEEs.

Down a. A-5-n9-s ere soda wa,er fozn-
,z.rs are zl-sz1y selling EI1-ossd oz9-s
Z. IS sass tha- -ae selection q a. early
zz-s fo- the delegate co-vs-t-7l as 90
cured Oklahoma fcr Reef
whatever else may bs sad about Dr.
F1rl1az pc does I1- q n-s1-y bard
z5-k getting people partoas-
j. g sa.E tza- large a-i-k hose -
gong 20 tzH CT s5ze1ze shea tze sra-1
ylry - Is1zzr county reE5r-E
4 c14--ry correz-e-1s-- -zs a new way
~ -E-1ri-E-- Babies Ese zz-5aacss tie
arrival CO "a I--.le q saEazze-.-
Ms Co. le.ssss won4a IL E.nsasAeT
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
ENGLAND,S GRAZ CANE

The German emperor's sudden and
vigorous action n the TranSvaal bus
mess which proved a matter OF such
surprise O. the time. finds later ex-
PLANTATION. aS does England's recent re-
affirmation Of the principles Of the
Monroe doctrine II now develops sAat
when Bismarck WAS a. the mead 81
German affairs, demanding explana-
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

Mr.. Stanley of Wichita. the super,n-
tendent of the biggest sunday school in
Kansas, says that Morrill, has been
actua5ed through malice in his treat
ment of Wichita. Morrill, ought To be
ashamed of himself
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

Chauncey Depew refuses TO speak in
Lawrence. Kansas, because the faculty
of the Kansas university wouldn't al
low Bob IngerSon 10 speak. Some day
the United States viii come 10 the
Eagles opinion that Depew is a chump.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23
THE FIVE TRIBES DOOMED

No people. whatever their powers or
rights can hope 10 stand before the az
sresSive and onward march of The
AnSIo-SaNon- Many tribes ana ma
aonS Of Indians have been swept away
ana have disappeared before a peonle
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

In Armenia. 5.546 girls have been ab-
Quoted 10y the Turks and 1.551 forcihIv
married. A. missionary writes.
there are too many cobwebs in Chris
Iian cannon.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

The house committee on judiciary has
reported favorably on the bill TO knock
out L ). mar>harS fees and place them
on salaries This is one sensible thing
that congress VIII do.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

Nansen. it Is said. found land ar the
North Pole, bus the agricultural condj-
ton Is such thar nothing will ever be
planted there bar few foolhardy ex-
piorerS.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

Kansas editors can amuse themselves
hll day Sunday by calling to mind that
The railroads do not appear to have
heard their protest on the corn rate.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

It should be demonstrated at once
that cathodephotography will take no
different picture OF an ossifed man
than the ordinary camera.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

Paris has declared that the balloon
sleeve must 20 and has substituted
tight sleeve which makes a woman's
arm look like a bologna sausage.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-02-23

Does the fate Of Kansas Republicans
rest in the hands of Morrilrs family
physician, and win that gentleman not
ify Morrill, that he must not run: