The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1896-12-18

4
much, proportionate to quantity, as
Rhe had.
II had to get the best of the per
nanent and Interchangeable things" Nj
Williams said, evading the soap ques
ton, though he knew he was right
THE strop, sponge and mug, you see.
cannot suffer much change by time
But saved considerably on the razor,
for | reasoned that you can sharpen a
razor every time you shave, and so it is
useless to buy costly one. ! paid 43
cents for this one, and am sure it will
answer every purpose. The bay rum
and other things"
"Oh, are there still more things to use :?
| didn't know the process of shaving
was such complex one. l thought all
that was needed was something sharp
enough to get the beard off"
WELL" said Mr. Williams, obviously.
II will confess that thought so, too,
but the fellow reminded me of all these
things, and, sure enough, l remembered
that they were necessary. But just a
few weeks and they will all be paid for,
and then every time shave after that it
w III OC ClCoI tiOtll. lLlDh Vi e5ttV1uk
that much money for the benefit of the
baby" and MIR. Williams gathered his
offspring up and rapturously kissed
him.
The next morning ~. Williams start
ed in on the work of economy. He pro-
cured a handglas4 AID hung it to the
wall, only to find when he began opera
lions that the glass was invariably on
the wrong side Of the light and his hand
always shaded his face. His lather
seemed &c be rclGc ant and watery also,
but those were MINOR evils which could
be remedied if be cLly had time, which
he didn't, for his train was due to leave
in half an hour He Iatheied on in a
liquid way for several minutes, and
then opened hostilitics with his beard.
There is 10 cause for description of
The horrible half-hour which followed.
Men who have never learned TO shave
nnd who try ii Know how the thing
works, ard noLo,.y else would credit
a fraction of the true story. Mr. Will
Iiams discovered new angles in his
CONFERENCE.-The les never before re-
realed TO human eye. He found that
his racer, although sharp enough to
3erform almost any miracle in moving,
ositively baked at his two-days-old
hubble. and when he did succeed in
hopping of dozen spikes at a saving
weep it was victory achieved through
foods of blood. He pulled the razor
and pushed and worked it crosswisc
nd gave it every motion to which the
/; RIM is possible contributor, and every
moment a new smarting sensation was
the register of new "pinking." But
it was not until he had worked his way
down from the cheek to the chin that
the full measure of his contract oc
Cured to him. There the blade, de-
led by the stumpy beard, lunged and
plunged and the uprooting sensation
was continuous and fearful.
But he was game, and ten minutes
after his train had left he rushed from
he house, pretending to be in too big
a hurry to catch the next train to stop
TO kiss his wife.
The next day Mr.. Williams tried it
again.
He made another effort the following
day.
On the fourth day MIR. Williams
snealAed into his former shop in Chica-
20, and, approaching his favorite bar
Der, said: ED, ! have been shaving
here so long l thought I'd bring my
mug in. And while l was at it l con-
oluded to buy an entire outfit for you
to use on me. Here's the razor and the
strop."
He hoped that Ed would not know
the truth, but the barber. looking at his
narrowed face, understood. When Mr..
Williams had gone the other BARRIERS
gathered around in an awed fashion to
look at the razor.
Mrs. Williams is a wise woman. So
wise that she has never mentioned the
Little Victor Educational Fund since
the day of it's incipiency. = Chicago
Record.