The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1896-07-22


the evil legislation of the two old parties
and restore prosperity to our oppressed and
suffering people.
TWO WONDERFUL AGRREGATIONS.
Uncle Nose Tells Billee About the Great Lon
(From the Lantern.)
When wuz leetle boy
Circus day filled me with joy;
On the bills they said they'd be
Ten big lions fur to see
Each with appetite so big
They could eat a. OK er pig.
Had just CONSTRUCTION all-four
An a bellows made him ROAR!
Said their jiraft wuz so high
Thet his head 'uld tech the sky
An I wonderd fore 1 went
How they got him in the tent;
Night fore asked pap an NAV
How they fed him hay an straw?
G'est tibet some of the show people
Put 1t on the tall church steeple.
Then by gittin' on his knees
He could eat with purfiek eaze.
Well. my feelin's got jolt:
'Twarnt no taller an a colt!
Longer AN a big oak tree!
An their jaws 'ud part so wide
Thet ten men could walk inside!
Had stuffed one-onery job
Mouth propped open with a cob!
Some folks thinks the London show
Discontinued long ago;
But 1t never stopped-my son
Just moved down to Washin'ton
Traded off it's fossils rare
Fer some curiows down there
Whar' it fuled jest one before
Now it fules hundred more.
An guess they like it so,
Err they'd changed it years agol
London-Joe-is quite a town,
Known the whole worr aroun'
Fer it's famous f1nanciers-
Who hold statesmen by the ears.
Well, this famous London show
Bought our statesmen long ago
Bought the influential press,
So that none could git redress:
Then they started into biz,
An you bet, they made it whizz!
Times wuz good, then, prices high
Men could pay fer what they'd buy!
Well this ornery, sneakin' show
Made an awful great big blow
Said the debt our country made,
By they war must all be paid
In hard gold, and silver, too.
Fer the greenback wouldn't do.
Then they made great big far,
Piled up greenbax. higher and higher,
Rolled 'em in, an it wuz done;
Half our money, then, wuz gone!
Then the silver mines out west,
Cum to reskew the opprest,
Offerin' UP their richest stores
At our bleedin' nations doors.
It wuz spurned by the decree
Gold, alone, shall be coined free"
Here the circus clowns come in;
Made things hideous with their din.
Whar they'd strike silver crowd
Their they'd holler twice as loud.
All their platforms, all their men
Was fer ''restorin' it agin.'
An the people, patient fules,
Sticks right to 'em, jes like mules,
Vote first fer dimmekrat,
Then republican, after that!
Think they're changin' it this way
Son, they're losin, all their hay.
Fer, while they are changin' over,
From J. Sherman's crowd to Grover
And from Grover back once more,
Whar they started in before
They are fallin' in the net
Which the circus clowns have set.
London shows in pollyticks
In this year If 'ninety-six;
Soon We'll hear projections gum
Which they call "Ohio's Son.
"Come, we hungry" he will say,
"Come to our great feast today"
An lot of dad-burned fules
Will whoop for Mckinley rule,
Garry torchlights on the street
Till they blister both their feet,
And find when the vote is cast L,
They are fooled, as in the past.
Ell had three pastur' fields,
Two of which no grass would yield,
An I'd turn the old gray mare
Into one o. them ats bare,
An she'd jump the fence intew
Totl1er field where no grass crew.
Stay in there till almost dead,
Then jump back again, instead
OF jumpin' In where grass grew tall,
DANCED eff I'd claim her at all.
Ell hadn't nary red
I'd knock that fule mare in the head.
Ed Blair.