The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-08-30

One or two evenings after this l was
crossing Howard avenue when l heard
a voice-Barker'S voice, but with an
unfamiliar nasal twang about it
hallooing at me: Look out therer'
Involuntarily I started. There was
an uncanniness about it--a weird and
unnatural emphasis. 1t was a voice
pregnant with the ring of authority,
and as 1 stepped quickly to one side,
there shot by me a vision of gray golf
stockings, sweater and cycling cap with
which [ was pretty we'll acquainted.
So he actually rugged up his wheel
with a phonograph! Darling into
nearby bicycle agency L hired wheel
in feverish haste, and sped up the
avenue in pursuit of the fleeing figure
in gray. In the dim distance I could
hear the howl of the fiendish thing as
it sped on through the night, and as l
sped over the asphalt with the speed
of the wind, the space between US les
sened and 1 began to catch the melody
OF shouts that were pouring forth
from the vicinity of Barker's handle
bars. He had evidently loaded it with
a variety Of expressions suitable for
all sorts of emergencies, and the thing
was splitting them out with an intelli-
gence that bordered on the marvellous.
Would you be so kind, miss" it said
with the accent of a Chesterfield, as a
woman of the fat and forty persuasion
stepped in the way, as to turn to the
right a little? Aw. thanks"
And the woman smiled at Barker,
and thought he was such a polite young
man. A few rods further on small
boy darted across the street beneath
the Pickering rays of the electric light.
Hi, there" yelled the photograph,
"get a move on you, now-yii vi! yl!'
Whereupon the boy was convinced he
was being pursued by lunatic and
fed down a side street.
Barker" said 1 solemnly, pushing
my wheel up alongside of him by a
tremendous effort, you had better take
that thing off. -
"Why, how do you do?" said he; "take
it off! Wily?"
Because I am morally certain" said
I, that it's a violation of ordinance
No 5,046 If one of those mounted po-
licemen comes along and that thing
bowls at him you'll go to jail
But Barker evidently thought that
was all nonsense. He didn't care If it
violated the whole council series from y
to lizard He had got hold of an ele-
CANT thing, and was going to stick to it,,
and I was a gay sort of man to rec
ommend it to him and then advise him
to give it up. All this time the phono-
graph was talking in the tone of deep
disgust to heavy individual who was
pedailtng along in a leisurely way just
in front of us, and who must have been
stone deaf or he would certainly have
clambered down and punched Barker S
head.
Then 1 was initiated into the nyster-
les of the thing, and saw how, by push
ing q small attachment down so that
it rubbed on the front wheel, the me-
chanism of the photograph was made TO
revolve, and it shouted out whatever
was in it until the clamp was released.
Barker said he had talked into it half
day, and it was evidently well sup
piled with vocabulary.
By the time we got to the club-for
we belonged to a club-both of US,
Barker was in a state of hilarious de-
light, and half of the dogs, children
and old ladies in town were on the
verge of insanity. OF course, all the
other fellows in the club had to learn
about it, and Barker pushed his ma
chine around on the sidewalk and made
the photograph curse them, and all
their relatives to the tenth generation,
which seemed to afford them the most
unbounded pleasure.
AS fitting conclusion to the even
ing's entertainment we all went up
stairs, and I regret to say that Bar
ker, after placing the monograph care
fully on a table beside him, got as