The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-05-12
DOES IT BY MAGIC
How Joe Furnish Maintains Order by ayp-
Eotie suggestion

Joe Furnish is a character. He has
not duplicate in the whole world Of
literature Dickens never could con-
ceive of such a parsonage. Joe IS bail
if OF the district court and. by the way.
ne is a good one even though he IS a
PopuliSt- He is the most populist Pop
ulist in all Sedgwick county. When
he was night clerk at the police sta
zion under Rufe Cones administration
IT is said that when the night had ad-
vanced he used 10 wake UP all the
sleeping tramps, array them on the
benches OF the police court room and
haraugue them on the economic Ques-
tons, until breaking rock in silence
seemed 10 them 10 be the very essence
OF delight and contentment- Those
who were compelled 70 hear him once
never afterwards asked for lodgings
AT the police station Joe would quit
q champagne banquet at any time 10
talk Populizm. He is the funniest man
without exception, around the court
househe is funny On account Of mis- IN
tense seriousness. The lord chamber
lain 10 the king OF Siam is not more at
tentive 70 lis liege lord than Joe is 10
Judge Dale, nor does he consider his
position more important and response
bic. That is what makes Joe Furnish
so funny. Around the court house he
is known as the automatic bailif. Or
der is his watchword. Now that the
Leonard trial is going on with a large
crowd in attendance he shows of TO
great advantage 10 the student of hu
man character. He strides the floor
with more than military precision and
he watches people as closely as a Rus
sian spy. II a lady drops her cam
brio handkerchief in the farrherest end
of the room he hears II fall and he I'M
mediately drives terror into the poor
wOman's heart by bringing the end os
his jack-krife down with a rub-a-dub
on his polished oaken desk. Lots OF
people Think he euforces order by hyp-
motto suggestion The great Cardinal
Richelieu VINO governed France with
his eye could not look fiercer out OF
his princely optic than Joe Furnish can.
Whenever 4 person coughs in the au-
dience Joe advances to the railing, arch
IS his eyebrows and gazes al the often
ding person until he or she feels guilty
Of a reasonable offense. When he
wihses TO be intensely severe, such as
when a man or woman whispers, he
accompanies ire optical demonstration
by a peculiar movement OF the hand
that terrorizes and sITbdues at the same
time. He raises his hand as il he was
describing the height Of a five foot four
person and then he iutters the tightly
closed fingers until he has the offenders
hypnotized into h4art-failure. 4 rip
pie OF laughter in the court room is
what aroUses the imperial. command
ing, majestic authority of Joseph On
one occasion of this character he viii
go further than the railing-he viii go
out among the audience, pick out one
particular person, look square into his
eyes and make EN- bat at the rate OF
sixty bats 70 the second He will look
at that poor fellow for a good half
hour and scare him out OF a seven years
stock of laughs.
When there is 70 offense TO correct
Joe keeps his eye on Judge Dale and
il the Judge happens by accident TO
OF otherwise, to look at him, he at once
commences 10 pound his jack-knife on
che desk even II the room is as silent
and still as death. That is principally
the reason why he is called the automat-
ic bailiff Sometimes when there IS
not a soul in the court but himself, and
he goes to sleep, he frequently wakes
up pounding his knife on the desk cali
ing for order. Sometimes too when
he and Judge Dale are alone and the
judge happens 10 look al him he jerks
himself around and tries 10 hypnotic
the vacant seats. There Is one thing
mighty certain and thai is that he en-
forces order. All the lawyers admit
that better order is kept in the district
court OF this county than II any other
eofr--+ in Kansas