The record-union., 1896-07-05

can will clean any chain perfectly. Oil
we'll and work it in; now wipe dry and
put on graphite, and the chain will run
smoothly.
What is the charge, your honor?
What is the charge:' said she.
"You rode your wheel too rapid
'Tis scorching, miss" said he.
.'Your honor, I'm from Boston!"
She said, and stamped her toe:
''The Beantown girls can't scorch, sir,
They are too cold, you know"
A man in New York wants to trade
a cemetery lot for a bicycle. He has
no takers as yet. Perhaps after q while
the bicycle makers may offer with ev-
cry wheel sold, as an inducement to
purchasers, cemetery lot and the at
tendance of a Observation-Disclosures
Post.
De Pine-Yes. young Slimpurse asked
for my daughter. l told him that when
ever he could come to me with 5000
of his own he could claim her hand.
De Clay-Ha, ha. Good joke!
repair shop and to-day he has the re-
| quired amount The invitations will
| be cut Tomorrow"
| One great moral influence not yet
credited TO the bicycle is indicated in
the fact that horses are now so cheap
/ ii the West THAT horse stealing is no
| longer worth while, and that species OF
crime has practically disappeared.
The wife of Sena tor-e elect Foraker OF
Ohio ard her three daughters are en-
thusiasts OF the bicycle. They will
take their wheels with them to Wash
| ington when the Senator's official term
begins.
Mars-So you have taken to the bicy-
Gle, Ell? How do you get on?
Bars-Oh, l can do that well enough
it's only the sudden1ess of my getting
of that Worries me.-'Town Topics.
/
The bicycle is knocking out the horse
even in the estimation of Indians. Little
Black Bear a Nez Ferce chief, a few
days ago in Marion County, Or, traded
thirty horses for a bicycle.
Tom-Why have Dick and Grace quar-
relied?
Hazel-They are both learning to ride
the bicycle, and last week they met each
other in the park. She tried to bow tc
| him, and he tried 10 raise his hat and
each blames the other for the result
| c
| man,
"And a scorcher who made the pace!
THAT saves me trouble: then Peter
said,
"Scorchers-the other place"
There is but one scarlet bicycle in
London, and Sir John Gorst, Vice-Pres-
ident of the Council, the Minister for
Education, rides it. Archbishop Walsh
of Dublin also rides a wheel.
Count Tolstoi, who went among the
bicyclists last year, aged 81, recently
laIplied in Moscow for the permit which
wheelmen need who wish to ride within
the city lines.
Poor Dick is gone. He was a de-
voted cyclist, wasn't he?" Yes, indeed!
He left a will stating that he was to be
cremated and used to help out on oul
new cinder path
In cleaning a machine care should be
taken not to scratch it, The best way
to remove dry mud or dirt is to use ar
oiled rag or cotton waste.
/ 1t is remarked that few positions
make husband appear SO loyal to his
wife as when following her on a bi-
cycle tandem.-Meriden Journal.
A cyclist in Bedfordshire, England
has had his machine shattered under
him by lightning, while he escaped un.
hurt
A Georgia man has been arrested fol-
carrying whisky in the tires of his bi
Icycle.-Meriden Journal-Courier.
An inscription has been put on the
Matterhorn reading: Notice. This hill
is dangerous for bicycles
1t is reported that ten tandems have
been sold in 1896 for every one sold il
1895.