Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1896-02-29
Continued Next week)
SAW THE JOKE.
How Mr.. Hardware Played it Fine on His
Friends.

Mr.. and Mrs. Hard ware get along as
well together as any couple in Chicago.
They have been married twenty-eight
years nov and the only rock they have
ever split on is Mr.. Hardware's pen
chant for playing jokes, telling stories
and propounding ~conundrums. Some
times Mrs. Hardware herself gets a
CLEAN OF satisfaction mt of the inno-
cen pastime which affords her liege lord
so much %simon-pure enjoyment but that
is only when she can see the point;
when sine cant she gets mad.
Mr.. Hardware came home in unusual
ly high spirits the other night.
well, sir, Maria. he said. putting a
double dose of cream and two spoons in
his coffee. Il saw the funniest thing to-
day that I've ever came across yet
Mrs. Hardware said: Did you?' aud
attacked her roast beef gingerly.
Eyes he answered. laughing uproar-
iously at the remembrance of the anus
ing incident, and the best part Of it is,
the joke is on Harris this time. You
know Harris, don't you, the senior part
ner of the firm of Harris Il Copperly ~
Mrs. Hardware nodded to let him
know she had an intelligent understand
ing OF that much OF the story and Hard
ware proceeded.
Il took u couple of friends up to his
Office to-day to see him on business and
whom should we find there but Charley
Wingley! You know Charley and what
a whole-souled fellow he il. Harris is
just the opposite and | must say that.
although he is a perfect prince in some
respects, he IS the stingiest man under
heaven. | guess he vas never known
to treat in his life. But ! tell you We
got one on him this afternoon. Through
the intercession Of Charley and me a
deal which had been hanging tire be-
tween him and my friends for months
was consummated and after everything
was all settled Charley proposed in that
inimitable way of his which will allow
of no offense that we all 90 down and
take a drink out of Harris profits to
cement the bargain"
Mrs. Hardware frowned and said
something about low" and "%ungeutle-
manly grog-shop habits, but Mr.. Hard
ware interrupted her with "Oh. pshaw,
Msris YOU don,t know anything at al
about these things They're necessar,
in business. and, after another edition
of hearty "~ha-ha's," he went on will
his narrative.
I'VE ali went down 10 Jessop's anC
ordered the highest-priced drinks he
had in the establishment and YOU ought
TO have seen Harris eyes water wher
the bill was presented. We just did il
on purpose To get even with him fol
more than M little trick he has played
on Us. | don't know when anything
has done me so much good as it did TO
see him fish out that $40 bill and iillip
it in front of Jessop's face. Ha, ha,
ha."
He leaned back and laughed until bis
second cup of coffee got cold, then he
remembered the last installment of the
story and Strengthened up to finish it.
BY the way. / guess Jessop must be
in pretty hard luck here Of late. Al
any rate, he couldn't change that SIC
bill. The whole crew of US would have
been in a pretty fix if | hadn't happen
ed TO have the exact change myself"
Mrs. Hardware dropped her fork with
a CHATTER.
"You dido" she shrieked, fairly cleo
tritied oy the pith of the joke as it pre-
sented itself 10 her. Joseph Hard
ware, do you mean to tell me that you
settled that liquor bill %yourself?:'
why, yes, Maria, Harris
And then you tell me-, she stormed,
willing him with unutterable scorn,
that the joke is on hing
Maria he suorted. you can't see
a point when it's flung smack-dab in
your face"
But Maria thought she saw it that
time. Chicago Record.