The record-union., 1896-06-19
Hishae q N Ieavening Powa-Lasese US Rspos
R3N!a!!l! al Rs*assE Rskies
ABSOLUTELY PURE
SMISER'S S0LILOQUIES.
NEW WOMEN.

to explain, have cOllided with the new
woman-in fact with several of her
a whole lot of 'em. The Rev. Anna
Shaw, Miss Yates, Miss Hay ct al. have
invaded the interior, going even unto
Redding, which is in the mountains.
And they spake unto us-spake long,
spake 1uently, spake explicitly and
were verbose. They took the floor and
held it for two days, without a struggle.
They could have spoken longer and
then have had words enough in reserve
for the rest of California.
The principal pavilion at Redding
was quite filled to hear the speakers,
and the speakers were heard. The au-
diences were ninety per cent. women
and seemed to be appreciative women
The rest of us were only men and
children. / secured a chair we'll to the
front, and was Immediately buried
under panOply of big, broad hats,
balloon sleeves and-oblivion. But I
could hear the sound of voices dis
tinctly in the direction of the platform,
and the voices dealt in language-or
rather dealt out language-that was
fairly comprehendable, if not compre-
hensive.
Both the Rev. Miss Shaw and Miss
Yates are distinguished women, women
of talent, tact, assurance and platform
experience. They must rank at least
with Colonels in the Susan B. Anthony
army. Miss Hay is one of the most
charming, pleasing and fascinating
beggars that ever talked me into relin-
gushing a coin without my having any
hope of ever getting value received.
ic nd o;o oil
speaker, and is evidently a product of
years of devotion to her cause-close
observation of one side of it-and she
wields words with a great deal of judg-
ment and prodigality, especially the
prodigal part of the phrase. In the
language of Shakespeare, we could spy
entertainment in her. "She discourses
she carves, she gives the leer of invita-
tion; age cannot wither her, nor GUS
tom stale
I greatly enjoyed listening to Miss
Shaw and Miss Yates CAS- far as l could
control my sentiments), and 1 can see
but one or two objections to their elo
Guence and their logic. Of these OBJ
jections the only one l will touch upon,
Incidentally is that neither of them
are qualified to deal with the subject
cause they advocate.
Both Miss Shaw and Miss Yates are
Observation-Disclosures attractive, able
and verbose-but they are spinSters
just the same. Being a bachelor my
self, / aver that / know as much about
the subject as they do, and that neither
of us know much about it. Spinsters
and bachelors only fringe society. We
don't know anything about the inter-
nal and complicated domestic affairs of
the human world. Miss Shaw Miss
Yates and me and Susan B. Anthony
are only speculating.
Now, we bachelors don't want the
spinsters to vote. HeN is danger.
Give them the privilege, and there will
be mischief afoot. These spinsters are
plotting, and who may not be crushed
with a plot? Whatever the real senti-
ments Of spinsters may be, we can
rest in the assurance that they are not
content. Some of them may really
want to marry, and those who do not
want to marry will not want anyone
else to do such a thing. The idea! Some
of them may say, with Hamlet: There
shall be no more marriages; those that
are married shall remain so, all save
OiiS, clC HIS Will not 40. 1nS Ql-
vorce industry at Chicago would per-
ish,
However such things be- we bachel-
CrS protest against female suffrage
and warn those in bondage that the
spinsters are conspiring against soci-
ETY.. There is something in this move
ment more than natural if philosophy
could only find it out. There is method
in their madness, or in the words of
later poets There is a nigger in the
fence"
Perhaps the new women are chiefly
spinsters, who have got on the hither
side of a sort of Mason -and-Dixon line.
and are forming a confederacy. They
hope to esta ablish conditions even newer
than new women. If they once are in
the ascendancy, look out for new Con-
stitution and all sorts of revolutionary
doctrines. They may enact some law
against bachelors, and may, perchance.
enforce marriage
This is grave matter. 1t will be an
noying for some of us to marry at the
drop OF hat, especially if the right of
selection from variety is not accorded
would rather let some of them vote
than marry EN- l have seen some
women, who inclined to be new, who
would want to boss my ranch if they
had me up a tree. They would expend
my income in big sleeves or boomers.
IT l never do anything thereafter /
desire to demolish one of the corner
stones OF Miss Shaw's philosophy. She
dcnt want to pay her taxes. She re-
pud1ates taxation without representa-
ton, and she makes it particularly sui
try for the Tax Collector who calls at
her ranch. Now, if Miss Shaw. as a.
taXpayreSs, is not willing to pay a
property tax these days, she is very,
very near; she is, as it were, consorting
with, or at least leaning toward, the
gold bugs and monopolists. She is GER
tainly shrewd enough to observe that it
is the people who have no property who
pay taxes. Even Macaulay a long time
ago observed that taxation was bur-
den upon industry, rather than wealth.
@, Miss Anna Shaw. if they taxed your
industry, how conscientiously you could
kick!
But, on the other hand, these spin
sters may be misconstrued. They may
even build better than they know. Per-
haps some of them feel platonically in
clined, or something of that sort. In
| the fact that Utah was one of their
easiest conquests, there is matter for
speculation. There are Mormons in
Utah, and if a man with seventeen or
| more wives may survive-let US con-
slider.
The Mormon doctrine is somewhat
| favorable to the new woman. If wo-
| men have not been in power in Mormon
| dom, they have at least been an over
whelming majority. The female Nor