Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-04-09

quiZed, pleased like a child over the
expected result of his practical idea.
Never before had he looked so be-
nign, knowing and self-satisfied, as on
the morning of the day that was to
bring the denouement, when he APP
peared at the breakfast table. With
beaming countenance he received the
presents and congratulations, and
when asked by his wife why he had
yesterday locked the door of his bed
room and taken the key with him, he
looked astcnished, and replied like the
thorough pharisee that he was:
''Did 1 really do that? Well, do
declare! / have never been so absent
minded before. Then 1 suppose those
old pieces of furniture are still in my
bedroom. / never noticed them this
morning."
"That is nothing responded his wife.
81 will at once order them moved back
to your study"
''Do so, my DEAR" exclaimed the pro-
fessor, an odd, sarcastic kind of a smile
perchance meet with surprise, take it
cool, like the brave little woman you
are"
1t is no wonder that a remark like this
filled the heart of the good lady with
joyful anticipation. She almost flew on
the wings of expectation to the study,
but soon she returned. AT the thresh-
was pale as death, her eyes dilated, her
expression betokened surprise, and in
decision-almost fear.
II feel so queer" she finally admitted,
as if talking to herself, shave / lost my
senses? or do my eyes deceive me?
Jaconde, Euphrosine, come with mel"
The professor laughed heartily. He
could scarcely await their return. When
they at last appeared, his daughters,
with an almost idiotic expression on
their faces, his wife's thoughtful and
restless looks fixed upon him, he
thought he would burst from laughing.
Suddenly his wife, forgetful of good
manners and their children's presence,
ran up to him, eXclaiming:
"Are you crazy? Why do you carry
on like a fool? What has happened in
this house? Only day before yesterday
l ordered the coverings of the set in
your study turned, and the furniture
polished and vanished, for which I
spent ten dollars, and now-what imp
has been playing tricks on me? I see
the same dirty, old and worn silk on
top as before! How is such a thing pos
sible? 1t is enough to lose ones senses,
and you persist in roaring at my per-
dicament?"
- But the professor had now stopped
laughing. And as for the expression Of
his face, it differed not an iota from
those of his two daughters.
Wife," he said, mildly. II do not
comprehend at all. What are you talk
ing about, having the covering of that
set turned? Know then, that not you,
but had this done yesterday. in
tended it as surprise for you"
"What? You did, yesterday"
Eyes, my dear, yesterday! And all
was finished by evening. Now you will
understand why took the key of my
bedroom door with me. But come, con-
fess! was 1 not practical?" And again
the professor began to indulge in laugh
ter.
But his wife did not feel like join
ing in his hilarity.
Husband" she sobbed, with trem-
bling voice, "supposing were to tell
you that day before yesterday, and
the two girls, together with "a couple
of upholsterers, have had that furniture
repaired right here on this spot?"
And supposing were to tell you,"
he interrupted her angrily, shat have
had the furniture repaired yesterday,
do you hear? yesterday"
Yesterday? really, do you mean yes
terday? Heavens! what have you
done?"
The poor woman dropped family into
"a chair.
"Unfortunate man, what have you
done?"
"Done? Why, had the covering
turned, the"
''Yes, you had the good side of the
covering turned inside, after had it
turned the other way the day before,
you fool!"
"W--h-a-t!"
The professor seemed to understand
at last, for he shot out of the room and
made for his study. When he reap
peared after a considerable delay, he de-
clared that it was all true enough and
the furniture looked as bad as ever.
Just think of it, dearest" he re-
marked, half jokingly, half in anger,
land the upholsterer had even warned
me that the goods looked like new, and
needed no repairing!"
But the joke fell fiat. His wife was
not so easily quieted.
"And pray, how much did you pay to
that conf, mean to that upholsterer
of yours?"
"How much? Why, $751;"
Fifteen dollars!" the now thorough
ly reused woman repeated. Fifteen
dollars" She tore her handkerchief in
shreds.
II tell you what it is" she added in
her most positive tone and manner.
"Now, absolutely insist on a new set
OF furniture, and what is still more, one
| for $3.50, because for less than that
Il n