davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-02-25

The Grand Opera House was crowd
ed to the doors last night with an
audience which assembled to see and
hear the illustrated lecture by Mrs. H.
E. Monroe. of Philadelphia. on THE
Scottish Reformation. or John Knox
vs. Mary Queen Of Scots" Every seat
was occupied and many stood in the
aisles The audience manifested its
appreciation in applause which was be-
slowed without stint upon the many
beautiful stage pictures. The prOduc-
ton was generally regarded as even
superior TO the spectacle of Martin
Luther and the Reformation" which
was given at the same place last year.
Last nights entertainment was Civ
en- for the benefit of the Home for the
Aged and Friendless Women, under
the auspices of the Board Of Lady
Managers of that institution. 1t will
be repeated this evening, and at the
matinee tomorrow afternoon, and
crowded houses will no doubt be the
rule. The programme follows;
PART FIRST.
AllesOrlcal Procession" Rallying OF
the Clans" Chorus. Form Your
Rattalions.'
Leaders. Cora Daley and H.H. Bradley
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-02-25
SCOTTISH REFORMATION.
The Interesting Story Of John Knox
and Mary Queen Of Scots

at the Grand Opera
House, Last Night, in the Form OF
an Illustrated Lecture-Large and
Appreciative Audience The Pro
gramme Of the Entertainment.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-02-25
Names OF Ladies and Gentlemen Rep
resenting the Scottish Clans.

Wallace II. Smith, Harry l.. Hesse'
Emil c. Barthel, J. H. Cooper,
Allen w. Tracy, Will T. Nesbltt,
Harry MCGUIRE.
Miss Flora Pollack, Pianist.
DR.. John Mcclure, Leader OF Orches-
ira.
Committee on Arrangements:
Mrs J. \. Vance, Mrs. Geo. Wise,
Mrs. J. A. Bell, Mrs. II. F. Jones.
The lecture was delivered by Mrs H.
E. Monroe. She appeared here in the
same capacity last season, and there
was a general desire to hear her again.
Her reading is clear and distinct, and
in her hands the subject matter is in
vested with a new interest. The ladies
and gentlemen who participated ac-
quilted themselves handsomely, show
ing the result of their frequent rehear-
sails. Their costumes were historically
correct, and the groupings, marches,
drills. etc. made up a series Of charm
ing stage pictures. They were so uni
formly gooi that it would be impossible
to particularize. even if a lack Of space
did not forbid. The lecture gives the
hearer a better conception of the story
of the Scottish Reformation than could
be secured by reading dozen works on
the subject. Special credit must be
given 10 the Arrangements Committee,
composed of Mesdames j. \. Vance.
George Wise, J. A. Bell and Henry F.
Jones.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-02-25

WIIIdIF ts'uTI OF NUISuIs on FNIOIaS
and Knights Templ9r Scottish
Guards. Story Ended-Fif-
teen Views.
PART FIFTH.
Allegorical Drill-Triumph Of Puritans.
Gods Miraculous Deliv-
PranctN
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-02-25
PART SECOND.

Scene Of Puritans and Students from
Glasgow University on their way to
Leith to meet the Queen.
pUritqnS.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-02-25

T. p. Williams and W. VI. King. of
Grafton. p. * o. officials. were guests
of the Windsor Yesterday.
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-02-25

". J. Connolly w. E. Sloan. Walter
Wishton. VI. II. Davis. "A Quartette or
oil men from Butler Pa, autographed
at the Mcclure yesterday
Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1896-02-25

A. w. Alberts. the fat and good ma
Ured hotel proprietor of GAINESVILLE
is a Mcclure guest.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

TIE santa Fe route - the direct line
to Cripple creek. the greatest gold mining
camp il the world Colorado express
leaves kansas City at l0-l5 n. daily.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

spriullIst. q Csoien). i2 30 l. second;
Sweetheart 97 tShoreD I 20 l, third Time.
11af.. STtirEtImc Cont, Ada NJ. G..r-
3aE4 LsuI. Lady tnuc, Imp. MRrign. f,t
ana Aaron also ran. spittuahst to J.
second ra..-Futso. $500: for maa8cn
.-ssatsoii four urloues lroustoue. ig
r5nis ~ uNH. Z TO 3. won Cicmats, p
iSh.-.r3 f1 second. Masquerade, %
ttfltt n. D. third. Time u.a2. Worry
N.; HornI- Belle. Belle - Niles, f4te,
,lJra JtN.. Attic ~, l}ou. ~ and k'hus
Th.rl race Purse. So Tor s-yc7rolas.
SIS lriarcs Honor, l04 tshcryr. 70 p
won. Talth g.. 1V a. Hun u 3. So
or1. OIL SaucIS. Inl fHau1I 20 2, NIX
Tlm. lt1s Ha-iia Royal NyUie LtiG
Eintho f.oyal Princess ana Eahella ~
a.s1 rr.. tlkg Bread lett az posi- NO
ruurth Purse. 500. for 4-y~ar-o'ls
1uH upwards ono mile Jamhor.e. l'i a..
Hun. ~ fl p. won, Tspcrel 20 'haN.sh a
fa ]. second. Gold I1st lg '.f$, ~
f1 T. tNrG Tim,. y tf8 N|oIri Fan
wis. MISS EoNs'; queen E's~ alt Ma
-.uu Holm, also ran. Ianettt, 70 =
Fif.h ra#o Purse. E". for s-yearelis AMI
upwards. o~. mile aud twenty yaris. SIS
.'r Ho-ir.E 20 lEgrr-l. Is o. .. Won fru-
don't ~ tElrr,tt. s tp Z. see HHa. rug. ~
lNfasHut 90 q thirN Tiwr W Mtlte
ST. imr Douu,r1-l. Jubilee. I~'tr, haIih-
1uit dnd Airti1hi also ran. Prudent TO
S-Nt. race Purse. SEQ. f5r '-yetr-olds
and upv frts. srllire SIX iNrionEr ~
tHurr-l. s to j. SECOND, Ssyhrpok. iS Mat
th.W-I. tu T. third Time f.U I.ark
TI1.r Denver. LouE3ale. E4sp.T' isafii1n
auI carrie f. also rHN' fsdf., q 10 2, ltit'.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

Aitga IAN Islload ar q chieago @ "a e ,sl 81 Lsals
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

. a.
hF Isz' 'z aL IN.
IH i. HI.ar.. Louisville Sat ra. Daa'.s
H..r.#. H.#rI..f al rHa
g.ra
M no fr.r.r.... .t.....T.rH #- af the
y...,. . tr.. ,r..sss
y.-. lie
l.... .--
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

No; I've bssn there. Am goIng 10 get 1
tieket back . ono over Tic Mabash.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

No, I'gr Herg flcTe. Am E1ius 70 gat q
ticket back % ohio over the Wabash,
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11
Good speakers for the Fourth Ward.

The Fourth Ward Republican Club VII
meet az Justice Hawthorne court room
this evening. j. II HarkIess. Judge Jones,
j. j. Green and +. ". clifford viii speak.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

s.-HfEHt. .ar r.. Republican nomination
l.r .I.rmIn Ht .H".r roH '0.m IalrI
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

Every mother needs PARKEUs GtSctR Toxic
il dispels pain sleeples~ues4 auu Getilty.
IARkER hAtn nAf.AN I. ne " the mir.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

Shipped daily Ia secure pa akacss by
GEORGE EiSSELL HrlggIsf
Opposite waiting room. Union depot
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

Leave Kansas City Tor s. Louis uptri ION
short fast line. t---
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

usual packed house. Speeches were made
by =. w. Clifford. candidate for police
Judge; Colonel &. y. Muusou, g. " Ran
dali and j. a. Hays.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

The Sixth Ward Republican Club met at
leIl East Fifth street last night. Wlth iln
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

Mrs. - fnsIow'- SOOTHING SYRUP Tor chill
creu treiE iAa sgfteEs tue gums reduce lnHaia-
nation ai!ay pain. eures u!ud cole - !. u3llit
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

4 used on an Dining Cars OF III, Ch,cap,
rflat Mg-lefa ld4.%ay tIaple Leaf routs
= pea Alol1g7 - faul' Muneap5. and
eelyt. secoAl and Myandotte --'--'
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

,tree msEazinea ana newspapers on an
Maplr i-rai tfaius tchicass Great w a. -
railway Tickets. West Nintb -, tzty IN
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

Leave kausaa City Tor 81 Louis unuI 800
every niEht by tbs Wabash railroa1. Tie
short last llpz.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

a railroad journey under ordinary cir
cago & Alton railroad . a rest ana pleas
ure- Their perfect roadbed. compartment
sleeping cars and palaee reclining chair
eGF= Make Il easy.
Kansas City daily journal. [volume] (Kansas City, Mo.) 1892-1897, 1896-03-11

s"ihs 20 Cripple r-rk.
No; I've been there. Am aofpr p, ~.
ticket back 70 Ohio over tie Wab8eb So 4
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15

amazed inhabitants of the lakeside hur-
rying to the waters edge. and sort OF
stage fright seized me for moment
but | could not now withdraw from ap-
pearing before them. also saw the
large. extensive hotel at the end OF the
lake looming up. and / realized that l
must sail over it or else inJure 1t. l
hardly expected to clear it, but leaped
into space with all my might. l went
up at an angle of 40 degrees, and as l
did so several men along shore began
to shoot at me with Winchesters. !
could hear the plaintive ping OF the
bullets as they passed, and every ping
gave me a CONFUSION. | was within
so feet of the hotel and was just pick
ing out a window through which | cal
culated to enter, when the whole
apparatue struck a telegraph wire and
instantly collapsed. ! hung there like
a disabled kite for a minute or two,
while the crowd gathered, and then the
wire broke and | landed among the as
tOnished inhabitants, much bent and
disheveled when | struck the ground.
1t was a great hit, and as a scientific eX-
pertinent it was highly successful, as |
understand it demonstrated something
about aerial navigation don't know
what
These endeavors to acquire knOwl-
edge OF a new sport are almost always
fraught with peril. | have been learn
ing to ride bicycle for several months
past, and as one result have become
aware OF tender spots, and receptive Of
bruises, sprains and aches of which
during a most freckled and varied ca
reer | had been utterly ignorant. | have
learned that man has too much anat-
omy. A chart of my sore spots, bruises
and cutaneous punctures would be a
map Of my whole epidermis
Gentle reader. with the clear brow
and soft eye, have you ever bought a
silk hat? If you are a woman you may
own up and say you haven't, but nearly
every man has at one time or another
squandered his money. A silk hat
finds by some peculiar, esoteric cussed-
ness, every projection, every overhang-
ing object and promptly brushes or
hangs up against it, and the newer the
hat the more collisions it seeks and ac-
quires.
So to one whose aristocratic lineage
has transmitted a skin delicate as COS
samer, through which is visible the rich
azure blood pulsating like the old
scratch the smile will appeal. Low,
coarse natures will not understand the
transparent delicacy Of a New Jersey
cuticle, nor appreciate how sensitive 1t
is to contact with sand gravel, broken
clam shells, bottles and scrap iron.
Only a Roentgen ray could discover
the internal Heterogeneous | more
than suspect - disarrangsments that
are the results Of the acquisition Of this
novel sport.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15

| took quite a lot Of lessons in riding
and mounting at the Elite academy,
the floor of which, for some reason or
other, was always cleared Of all other
scholars after my first day. 1t seemed
fun enough for the others to sit up in
the gallery and let me learn. ! paid 81
for arnica the first week, but I thought
1t cheap, for ! was thrown in with some
very nice people. Contact in that way
with refined folks is very beneficial.
and rubbed off my gaucherie and a
large brown mole on my forehead.
which has been a blemish on my fea-
lures for many years.
Then | got d wheel. which was so
yellow that people gathered around
like bugs around a lamp to sec me
mount. A little boy who had learned
to ride as boys do, when four years old.
held the wheel and | got on. The wheel
started, then reared up, throwing me
on the port scupper against a stone
wall. fell heavily to the ground upon
my magnum bonum and the now in
furiated bicycle sprang upon me. lab
bling viciously at my eyes with its han
die bars, while at the same time II
smote me in the shins with the sharp
pointed pedals. It was awful! None
Of the crowd essayed to help me, and
the boys yelled with delight. In such
moments the barbaric instincts Of our
savage progenitors assert their sway
over our minds even in this advanced
age. l thought of this afterward.
For several moments the struggle
4
fort, | showed the wheel away and
managed to get between the wall and
a large tree. where I eluded its repea led
attacks until it cooled down and al
lowed the boy to lead it away and
chain ii in the cellar
was urged to make another at
tempt. but with my face set sternly
and through my clenched SIS teeth
replied Nit" Then in an evil hour
joined a gay party, the members Of
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15

ridicule that greets all innovations
told him ] would be glad to make
the attempt, and he assented quite
cheerfully He seemed confident that
I would succeed in making very fast
time on the ice with them. We went
up to Greenwood lake for the expert
ment. and he attached the wings to me
by half a dozen strong straps The
lake is about ten miles long. and except
where the ice cutters we're working
was covered with smooth ice a foot
thick. | had this whole area before me
as ] slowly skated away from the little
group of spectators. Then | lifted the
wings by spreading out my arms.
In an instant | felt the wind take
hold of them with a vigorous and deter
mined grasp. | slipped away and glid-
ed along with an Undesirable feeling
of buoyancy. 1t was delicious. No eX-
ertion vas necessary. | just sailed.
About ten seconds later the long eX-
pected gale predicted by Four-castor
Dunn arrived at that locality and
struck me. The wind attained the un
precedented velocity of IS miles an hour
and the storm centered just in my vi
cinity, Of course. In a twinkling my
momentum increased, and | saw at once
that / would not need the rings to trav-
ell quite rapidly. | tried to lower them,
but it was impossible, so | decided to
cast them loose. AS | was deciding |
perceived that I was about to arrive at
the spot where the ice had been re-
moved-a space about 300 feet wide
THE BEGINNING OF THE ATTACK.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15
FAIRMONT.

Fairmont w Va, March 1i.-Hon.
A. B. Fleming returned yesterday from
Charleston. where he attended a meet
ing of the school book board.
Miss Ida Peddicord left for her home
Of Baltimore after visit to friends
here.
Miss Mollie Stone was confined to the
house several days this week with
rheumatism.
George JOliffe. of Grafton, spent Sun
day with his parents here.
Rev. sam Small will preach a sermon
TO the different secret orders mere Sun
day afternoon at the Opera House at ,
o'clock.
The municipal election takes place
one week from to-day and the cam
raign promises to be very lively the
coming week The main issue will be
license or no license, and both sides are
working hard.
The case of Finley Adm VS.. the Mo
nongah Coal and Coke Co. is now on
trial I'm the Circuit Court. Adm sues
for $4,000 damages for the death of Jas.
Bircher Col j. Hop Woods. of Phil
ippi. and w II. Martin represent the
plaintiff and A. b. Fleming and Hon.
John Bassell the defense
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15

which were going to take a ten mile
run. | mounted and after few wac
hles I went along fairly we'll My
main trouble when on a wheel is what
may be called an improving apprehen-
sion. I'm not afraid OF falling on
for I've fallen again and again ana
like it-but every time I come within
% rods of anything TO collide with II
assumes proportions that my know
ledge of drawing and perspective tell
me are utterly false. But still ! grow
unsteady. went along until was op-
posite the estate Of a neighbor who
doesn't like me because | am hand
somer than he is | glanced ahead
and to my terror saw tallyho coach
with six horses coming down the road.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15

and with that quickness of thought that
has enabled me to meet a creditor IN
moved, / decided that I must do some
thing. AS I neared the black, repulsive
looking water, an element for which
have little use or respect I leaped into
the air and scared across the open
space, while the hills resounded with
the wild alarms of the ice cutters and
filters who took me for a visitor from
another sphere, as they afterward ad-
mitted One of them said that he had
seen it coming, with horns and a long
tail. that it just kinder whirred past and
disappeared down the lake"
I dipped into the icy water up to my
waist on the farther side. but did not
linger was perfectly cool after that
| went on as before, but the straps had
slipped during my struggle to free my
self. and held me by the wrists only.
felt quite fly, however. saw the
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15
A FRESH INQUIRY.
1t VIII BE Made Into the Conduct Of DR..
Peters.

1t VIII BE Made Into the Conduct OF DR..
Peters.
Berlin. March l4.-Dr. Kayser, direct
or of the Colonial Office, announced in
the Reichstag to-day that, in view Of
the charges made by Herr Bebel, who
accused Or. Carl Peters, the explorer,
of causing a negro and negress to be
hanged without trial while he was i'm
perial commissioner in Africa, during
1891. a fresh inquiry will be held into
the matter. DR.. Kayser said the gov
eminent was not aware that after DR..
Peters had proclaimed officially that the
negroes alluded to were hanged as
spies. the English bishop Tucker de-
clined to receive Peters. saying he
would have nothing to do with muir
derer." DR.. Kayser added that the pre-
vious evidence had not established the
guilt of DR.. Peters in the eyes Of the
law.
Count Won Arim then read a letter
from Or. Peters, declaring that Herr
BebeTs assertions were partly untrue
ana pdIJly tAdSsei dLSH. i NJ hes'o ne
said. was tried by court martial for
burglary, and the negress was never
punished and returned to her parents
in September, 1891. 1t was another ne
gress. he explained, not his servant,
who after having been sentenced to be
confined in irons for six months, was
condemned 70 death in February. 1892
for attemDtiug to eScaDe Dr. Peters
further denied that he had been mar
ried to a negress according to Maham-
medan rights.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15

"The artist who has designed the
banner comes To- you With the entire
article painted I'm water colors upon am
immense sheet OF paper exactly the size
o. the banner that is 20 be made. Fiji
teen by thirty feet we consider am I'M
mouse campaign banner. Ten by twen-
o. i- iair size.
"Ne take the paper banner. tack IL 10
tho wall aud set tO work 20 copy 1T IN
"a maj erial that shall be more lasting
than paper. Take ,hat campaign pos
ter of Hill and viii show you what /
mean.
-Iu Hills posters we begin with the
stars and stripes. They are pui by
hand upou white BACKGROUND. The
stars mus, De placed carefully with their
pofnts spread. and the stripes cut away
90 make room for Oh figure Ornamental
r0n
"The flag with I ann a Democrat
comes next lt is piece of SILK cut
r-eht shape and sewed upon the banner.
The folds I'm DO are done by q girl VINO
is a clever artist with the needle. She
has done much church embroidery.
With dark silk she goes over that white
banner tracing Z ann D-e-m-o-c-r-a-t'
until every letter is perfect. She then
ur-s I'm the creasos until It looks as
though blown by the wind. The ham
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15
LAPAN NOT INTERESTED.

Washington, March 1.-THE cable
news from Pekin, concering the report
OF a secret treaty between Russian and
China. giving the former extraordinary
rights to build railroads through Man
churia. Northern China. is regarded
with Indifference at the japanese Iega-
ton in this city where IL was said that
the building of railroads through Man
churia with Russian capital was n mat
ter Of no special interest 10 Japan.
There is at present but one line Of rail
road in Nanchuria. that following the
coast for two hundred miles north from
Tien Tsin, and il is believed the con-
cessions referred to have in view 2 con-
nectiOn between this line and the Rus
sian trans-Siberisn railroad now in
course Of construction.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15
WHAT BI.METALLISM MEANS.
Sir John Lubbock Tells How Free Silver
Would Work.


Would Work.
London March 14.-In speaking OF
the proposed plan of the bimetallic
league to bring a motion before parlia-
ment favoring bimetallism, Sir John
Lubbock said TO a representative Of the
Associated Press:
"Bimetallists have always declined
to commit themselves to any ratio But
il is obvious that the results Of change
would. 10 a great extent, depend on the
ratio which was adopted. Al present.
roughly speaking, gold is more than 30
times the value of silver. There are
some bimetallists who would insist on
4 ratio approaching the market values.
For practical purposes, however, we
may at once dismiss any such idea. In
France. the legal ratio is still l512 TO l
and no French authority has shown
any disposition to accept any material
change. America would, believe, take
a similar view.
Practically. then, bimetallism means
a ratio of Il or 16 to | that is, that
foreign countries should be permitted
to send rs any quantity of silver at
double it's PRESENT price. Bimetallists
tell us that if there was any practical
probability of the adoption of bimetal-
lism, the value Of silver would rapidly
rise. doubt, however, whether this
would be the result. We should rather,
think, see a great stimulus given to
silver mines. u great increase of pro-
duction of silver and all creditors would
do their best to call in their debts
while they could still claim payment
in gold
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15
sports attract me,

shooting craps, yachting and running
up accounts, and l am thus tempted
into extravaganza of action at times,
especially if the exercise possess what
may be called scientific value.
In such a case ! am an enthusiast.
Thus when, a week since, friend VINO
is an engineer on the Erie road, showed
me a large pair of canvas wings which
he had designed as an aid to skating,
of which sport | am enamored, ! was
vastly interested. These wings, which
were mounted on bamboo frames, had
a spread of perhaps fourteen feet, and
after they were completed my friend
was quite pleased with them, but he
was afraid to try them, for fear Of the
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-03-15

IJUST GET OFF-THAT'S ALL.
| learnd aftrward that il was about
half a mile away. but l felt the hot
breath of the horses on my blanched
cheeks and the clanking Of their har-
ness rang in my ears. With sharp
quick motion threw the wheel TO star
board and shot into chain fence.
Here I left the wheel as if by prear-
rangement and dived into a large bed
of expensive roses that blushed with
delight as / moved them down ana
filled my skin with thorns.
My neighbor ran out AID said quite
Pia a?9&,g F." - so that even his )
own children heard him and moved
uneasily in their seats. Then he add
ed:
You think that's derned funny
thing to do. don't you?'
IF you think | came in here to be
funny. you err and err most errone-
ously."
| then withdrew with dignity in
time to avoid saying anything that he
might regret. and with the scent of the
roses still clinging to me l walked
home.
never have taken any lessons in
dismounting. I feel that it is needless.
My own ingenuity sufiices me in that
direction. for have eight hundred and
seven ways of dismounting and they
are all different and all my own origl-
nal discoveries. ! just get off that's
all-and am striated with lines so that
when | am alone and in the altogeth-
er'I look like an isothermal map or y
dress pattern.
WALTER McDOUGALL