davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The herald., 1896-12-18
NEWSPAPER WAITS.

For jackass endowed with the power
of speech, Balaam's did very little talk
ing.-Harlem Life.
Muggins-Is your son in business? :?
Juggins-Hes a contractor Muggins-
What line? Observation-Disclosures.
Nodd-Do you think there is any re-
lation between PERSONS looks and ac-
tions? Todd hope not. They say my
baby looks like me, but he acts like the
devil-Truth.
Heading Off the Critics-"You can't
catch that new minister Of ours a-nap-
ping" What has he done?" HE preached
a sermon last Sunday on Plagiarism in
the Bible."-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Old Gentleman-Serious I don't re-
member ever to have told lie in all
my life. Young Gentleman-So? Well,
do you know. I'm getting little forget
full myself-Boston Transcript.
What sent that dog away bowling
SOP" asked the 'possum. oh" said the
porcupfhe, ''he was nosing around for in
formation, and l kindly supplied him
with a few points. s."-Indianapolis Jour
nal
Your poem," said the editor thought.
fully, seems to me to lack something"
"Oh, yes,' replied the confident young
man; Il know what that is" Indeed?
<AHV NAde 10 IL uDiiSeNeASAA' 1890
ington Star.
WHOLESOME people have trouble with
their mothers-in-law; 1 am happy to say
that mine is an angel Van Pelt-Allow
me to congratulate you; mine was quite
i'll at one time, but she got well.-Harlem
Life.
Ambitious Actor-I have been study
ing the role of Hamlet for three years.
Do you know any way l can get my i'm
preston OF the character before the pub
lie? Manager docking him over)-Yes;
buy a theater.-Puck.
Changed-Parke-I can remember be-
fore / was married that / was tired of
verything-utterly blase. Lame
Things are different now? Il should say
SO; now it's real pleasure to go to the
club b''-Brooklyn Life.
Benson, you know. went to Africa
| and there met his death" Poor fellow !!
| But his body was brought home and
| given a decent burial, wasn't it?" We'll,
| they hanged the cannibal and then
| brought home his body and buried it,
| London Figaro
A CONGRATULATIONS Abe-What's s
| Mojave Mike lookin so mad erbout !?
| Th' court decided thet tn shootin' was
| done in self-defense, didn't it? Alkali
! 1ke-Yes, but this is TIL sixth man Mike
| hez shot wat b'longs to tn same mutual
| insurance company ez he does. 1t keeps
| him broke a-payin' tn 'sessments.-
| Truth.
The herald., 1896-12-18
TONIdHr's ADJUSTMENTS
Los Angeles Theater-Dr. Belgran.
Orpheum-Vaudeville and minstrels.
THE TARIFF AND CONGRESS

Grave and dignified John Sherman
gives notice that no effort will be made
by the Republican side to have the SEN
ate take up the Dingley emergency tariff
bill-that, in fact, the measure is dead.
Thus is the curtain rung down upon q
most miserable political farce. 1t was
never intended that the bill should be-
come law. 1t was rushed through the
lower house last spring to furnish cam.
paign thunder, and having served its
purpose it is strangled to death. A more
dishonest trick was never played, and
the surprising thing about it is that
nearly all the bosses, including Speaker
Reed, were sincere in their advocacy Of
1t. They did not see that Hanna and
his confidents were working them.
In connection with the announcement
that the Dingley bill is dead comes the
information that in the new bill, which
is now being prepared, the theory of
specific duties will be applied wherever
1t Is possible. The present tariff law
was drawn on the lines of ad valorem
duties, that is, according to valuation,
but that does not suit the industrial
trusts at ALL 1t would seem, however,
would be just what the ring would want
but it so happens that it is easier to
plunder the people under specific tar
If, mainly so because the people think
they know exactly what foreign goods
are paying for the privilege of entering
American markets. 1t is a given tax
Z very plain proposition, as they think.
the people want, but they are mistaken.
Take, for instance, the item of raw su-
gar. The trainers Of the new bill will
change the duty on raw sugar from 40
per cent ad valorem to l cent a pound
The people can understand what cent
. pound means, but the ad valorem tax
Of 40 per cent is confusing and unsat-
isfactory, the bosses say. but they fail
TO inform the people that a tariff of cent
. pound on raw sugar is, in reality, an
increase of one-fourth in the actual rate,
which difference is to come out of the
pockets of the people and go into the
pockets of the sugar trust And what
- true Of sugar is true Of wool and woolen
clothing, iron and iron products, and
about every other article of manufac-
ture that is needed for consumption by
our people.
The lines along which the leaders will
proceed are laid down, and they will be
carefully followed. The committee now
ut work upon a new bill is to adapt the
more extreme of the Mckinley duties
and move all others up to them. The
idea is to place labor and agriculture
entirely at the mercy of the industries,
And in turn the industries will undertake
to provide campaign money enough to
prevent the election of hostile con-
gress or president. Hanna and his con-
ddents are managing the whole business.
but they greatly underestimate the in
telligence Of the people, and if the ex-
treme legislation contemplated is en-
acted. the next congress will be sure to
The herald., 1896-12-18
GETTING MONEY.

There is man not young who thinks
this life is the time to get money, honor.
social distinction and no more-to get
them, and no matter how. That is his
idea. See what his life is, and how it
ends. Late in his existence, l shall not
call it life. he has a warm house, cold
heart full purse, an empty soul, a
deal of respect and honor. He leaves a.
great estate in house and stocks, a great
reputation in the newspapers and the
meeting house, and he takes into the
Kingdom of heaven little, mean, das-
tardly and sneaking soul, SO small that
it hardly seems worth talking across the
grave and paying the toll on at death s
door. And so he passes away, leaving
the fortune of a millionaire. and char
acter which a beggar would be ashamed
TO have dropped as pittance into his
aims basket.-Theodore Parker
The herald., 1896-12-18

whom she ever felt any jealousy. Should
brilliant. interesting Countess Warwick
go to court next spring, all will be for
given, and London gossips must then
pick on another victim for their ad
] imadversion.
| Mrs. Herman Davis of New York has
ridden her wheel over the great ST. Ber-
nard pass. She is the first woman who
has accomplished this difficult and pic
turesque bit of riding, and not many
men can duplicate it. Accompanied by
her husband she travelled 1000 miles on
her wheel during her summer vacation in
Europe, making between sixty and six
| ty-five miles a day.
Love never seems to grow cold in
| Winchester, Ohio, where John Alden,
aged 81, and Mrs. Margaret Drummer.
aged 10, of Locust Grove, have just been
married. Joel Weeks, aged 81, and Mrs.
Margaret Fenton, aged so, have also
been united there. The bride was the
widow of the late Alfred Fenton, and
was to have been married to Jacob
Seigondoller but he refused to deed over
his land to her, and the wedding was
declared off.
One of the arly duchesses of MARI
| borough, the Duchess Henrietta. was
passonately attached to Congreve. the
playwright, who for a long time dined
at her table Gaily. When he died, in
1929. the duchess had a lfe-siZe image
made exactly resembling the dead dra-
matist, and this efiigy, SO the gossips
said, was always placed in the seat for
merly filled by CongreVe himself. A
cover was invariably laid at dinner for
Mr.. Congreve"
The University OF Christiania has
founded special chair of natural sci
ence and zoology for Dr. Frithjof Nam
sen. The great Scandinavian explorer
has accepted the honor. and as the du-
ties of the position are said to be what
ever he chooses to make them. they will
in nowise interfere with the accomplish
ment of his plan for solving the myster-
les of the Arctic regions. The emolu-
ments, on the other hand, will be of ma
terial use to him in this work.
One of the most eminent colored men in
the south is Rev. DR.. ]. W. E. Bowen,
professor of theology at Gamman uni
versity, Atlanta. He was born In New
Orleans, but was educated at the north
and holds the degree of Phi. D. Ordained
at Springfield, Mass, in 1884. DR.. Bowen
has been in charge of churches in Bos-
ton, New York, Baltimore and Washing
ton, and before taking his present posi-
tion was made professor OF mathematics
ard languages in Central Tennessee COL
lege at Nashville; of systematic theol-
ogy in Morgan college at Baltimore, and
of Hebrew in Howard university at
Washington.
The herald., 1896-12-18
LET 1T ALONE.

young lady by the name of Miss
Florence Beckwith of Mt. Pleasant Iowa,
suffering from an attack of diphthera,
received an injection of anti-toXin,
which has been proclaimed to be an an
tidote for that disease-with the result
that in five minutes the young lady was
dead As the anti-toxin was admins
tered after a consulta ton of physicians.
and with the full consent of the parents,
of course 1t was case of justifiable hom-
icide-another sacrifice for the doctors.
Nevertheless lit will be a warning to the
rest of mankind to steer clear of anti
toxin.-Seattle Times.
The herald., 1896-12-18
THE TARIFF AND POLITICS

A permanent commission of experts.
provided that it We're properly consti-
tuted, would be able to lay before con-
Sress such data as would be extremely
helpful i'll framing tariff schedules. But
no tariff commission. however consti-
tuted, could possibly take the tariff out
of politics, and those commercial bodies
and newspapers that are looking FOR
such q consummation are bound to ex.
perience a disappointment. The consti-
tuition of the United States puts the tar
if in politics and holds it there; the con-
stitution of man makes it, inevitably
and always, an exciting issue when
ever change is proposed ashington
Post.
The herald., 1896-12-18
RAP AT CALIFORNIA.

The almond growers of California ask
for a higher tariff than fixed by the
Mckinley law. They put the demand
on the ground, not only that wages paid
those employed in the almond industry
are higher in Europe than in California,
but also that almonds can be brought
to the eastern markets more cheaply
from Europe than from California. IN
other words, the eastern consumers OF
almonds ought to consent to be taxed
not only for the benefit of the California
capitalist who grows almonds but also
for the benefit of the transcontinental
railroads that transport them.-Buffalo
On. " Courier
The herald., 1896-12-18
WOE OF WOOL MANUFACTURERS

Theodore Justice, leading wool mer-
chant of Philadelphia, says: The very
life of the wool business depends on
shutting out at once the enormous flood
Of wool imports which is now starting
to the United States from every wool
producing country on the globe" Isn't
this a terrible prospect for our woolen
manufacturers! Congress ought to put
q tariff on wool at once and keep it out
or our woolen mills will be running full
blast! To see woolen mills running, and
under the Wilson tariff too, would make
Mr.. Justice weep.-Utiea IN. " OBJ
sewer
The herald., 1896-12-18
NO DANGER OF REVOLUTION.

There is a great deal of wild and fool
ish talk in this country about danger OF
revolution, or, as Secretary Francis
calls it. AN uprising of the people that
will endanger our institutions" No
one need be in apprehension of anything
of the kind. There is not the slightest
possibility of any revolution in this
country except those peaceful and de-
The herald., 1896-12-18
SOME PUBLIC LAND STILL LEFT.

1t appears from the report of the secre-
tary of the interior that the public lands
still vacant amount to over 600 000,J0
acres, not including Alaska, with an
area of 1863 600, 900 acres. These are i'm
pressive figures. but they are consider
ably smaller than the number of acres
that Uncle Sam has given away since he
began business.-Boston Herald.
The herald., 1896-12-18

MUSE. SHAk ESPEARE SPEAKS.
Sometimes when I'm not at work on a play
Historic and full of warfare,
I try my hand in a casual way,
AT an al. TO keep me in carfare.
Why shouldn't l praise the bilious pill
And in loftiest number chirrup,
And make the epopular hearstrings thrill
With a poem on soothing syrup?
Why. shouldn't I cleave the cloudless dome
Through the biliow of light that's polar,
To rhapsodize on Excelsior Foam
That preserves the fleeting molar?
Sing no! for the laurels won by me
On the lotion prepared for frecklesi
My harp shaTt hang on the willow tree
While the soap muse brings me shekels.
For know in general sort Of way,
While with laughter I'm sorely shaken,
That the critics will rise in their might and
say
That they were all written by Bacon.
New York journal.
The herald., 1896-12-18

Some one asks what does the refund
ing bill mean?" 1t means that the Pacific
railway companies are indebted to the
United States in the sum of about s110,-
100000, borrowed money and interest
thereon, which is about due, and which
the railways wish to have refunded, or
extended 100 years at per cent interest.
That is to say, they want to get out of
paying a cent of the debt.
The herald., 1896-12-18

To bask in the sunshine in Los An
geles and read about the driving bliz-
yards in the east is better than being
an eyewitness to the whirling of the
snow and ice.
The herald., 1896-12-18

There is suspicion abroad in the
land that Mckinley is under promise
not to be a candidate in 1900, but to use
the influence of his administration to fix
things for Hanna.
The herald., 1896-12-18

Public sentiment Is crowding the presi-
dent to say to Weyler: Get out and go
home: the United States will look after
Cuba"
The herald., 1896-12-18

Los Angeles park of 5000 acres will be
an everlasting invitation to people every
where to come right here and settle down
for life.
The herald., 1896-12-18

The eyes of all Southern California
are upon the deep-sea harbor commits
sion. Next to rain to order, a first
class harbor Is what is wanted.
The herald., 1896-12-18

We can afford to say:
"Get every sort Of ScA,2-
hHgS Best tea of your gro
Ger, and get your money
back on what you don't
like"
Your tea-trade for the rest
of your life is worth the risk
and there is no risk.
A Schilling & Company
San Francisco y a.
The herald., 1896-12-18
HUMOR OF THE HOUR.

Your daughter, Mr. Banker. Is very
cold and coy toward men, it seems to
me-" Quite so she is a brave defender of
my millions" Batter.
The herald., 1896-12-18

The latest from Cuba is that Maceo
does not know that he was killed, and
that he is prowling about at the head
of very considerable body of soldiers.
The herald., 1896-12-18

Fully fifty cities and towns have noti-
fed the Cuban junta to call upon them
for money and munitions of war.
The herald., 1896-12-18

Some people seems heap mo- skyaht
o. misplacin' ten cents wuf O. cha ty, v
said Uncle Eben. dan day is o. git
tin swindled in er minin' scheme aw a
confidence game. e."-Washington Star
The herald., 1896-12-18

Unjust.-Lady de Liverus-"I don't
believe you ever loved me; 1 think you
only married We for my money!" Lord
de Liverus-"fhat's not fair; haven't
done my best to get rid of it?'-Truth.
The herald., 1896-12-18

Senator Allen of Nebraska is like a
dozen thorns in the Republican side of
the chamber
The herald., 1896-12-18

Unprecedented.-"I never knew a wo-
man to love her husband as nadly as
Mrs. Tootfiler." How does she show it?"
"She lets him have the top drawer in
their bureau. Record.
The herald., 1896-12-18

question of the right Of city or any
community of people to grant a license
to men to engage in such enterprises. No
such right exists.
The herald., 1896-12-18

agency Of the ballot box. The American
people are conservative even in small
things. The difficulty Of securing any
kind of reform proves that.-Indianapo
lis Sentinel.
The herald., 1896-12-18

Talk about Philadelphia being slow!
Here's q Philadelphia paper that has
already begun printing pictures of San
ta Claus!' Probably they are pictures
of the Santa Claus of 1895. Chicago
Tribune
Breezy-"Say I've got a great
scheme" Blunder-'What is it?"
Breezy-"Buy the battle-ship Texas
from the government at a big discount,
cut it up into little cubes and sell 'em
to the fishing tackle Dealers What
for?" "Sinkers"-ClevelandP Plain Deal
er.
elf-reepect-Mistress, from the par
lor-"Bridget, the front door bell has
rung three times. Why don't you an
swer it?" Bridget, from the Kitchen
Sure, mum, if OF opened it the first
ring, paple wud say OF did nothing but
tind the dure, an OF wudn't have any
wan think me that lazy. New York
Weekly.
Now, Johnny" said Miss Spriggins,
the schoolmistress, as she poised the
CAD above the bad boys back for a mo-
ment, II want you to remember that
when I whip you, it is not because-1 en-
joy bestowing punishment on you, but
good" HUH" retorted Johnny
Squanch, in the weary tone of blase
man of the world that is what comes
of a fellar's allowin' a woman to git
dead stuck on him. Puck.
The herald., 1896-12-18

IN DEFENCE OF THE ADVERTISING
MUSE. SHAkESPEARE SPEAKS.
The herald., 1896-12-18
WILLIAM S. CREIGHTON
Ed..or-i in Chief.

THE HERALD owns full Associated
Press franchise and publishes the complete
telegraphic news report received daily by
special leased wire.
The herald., 1896-12-18

EDITORIAL DEPARTMENTS 221 East
Fourth street. Telephone 156.
BUSINESS OFFICE: Bradbury BUILDING
"a West Third street. Telephone 2H.
The herald., 1896-12-18

fer a favor by reporting to the business
once late delivery or any other negligence
on the part of carriers. During the week
later than o'clock, and on Sundays by
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1896-01-17
ACCIONDE MANAHUACO.

La columnua del teniente coronel
Rodon, compuesta de 400 hombres
de Alcantara, 200 de Coon v una
pieza de artillerla, encontro las par
tidas de Rabl y otros cabecillas reu-
midas en- Manahuaco, entire Ventas de
Casanova y Jiguani. FL combate
duro unas dos horas despues del
fuego Sc TOGO pase de ataque y q la
bayoneta. librandose el combate al
arma blanca. defendiendo e enemieo
con gran tenacidad srs posiciones. Ell
teniente de Colon, senior Burguete,
con solo SO h m b r tiradores,
sostuvo un ataque de mas de 200
hombres a caballo, trabandose una
lucha desesperada, que durS mas de
media hora, y que fue cuerpo 4 cuer.
po, consiguiendo desalojar victorio-
samente al enemigo de la posici6n
que defendia. El enemigo dejo sobre
el campo II muertos que no pudo
llevarse en- la huida, como tiene por
costumbre. Sc lie cogieron porcion
de armas y caballos y Sc supone lleva
muchos heridos, pues la lucha fue de
las mas sangrientas.
Tuvimos 8 muertos, tres ofcia
les hefidos y AZ individuos de
tropa, 4 todos los que sc pres.
t6 asistencia sobre el mismo cam
po de Ia accion, llevandolos luego
| Jiguanl Dice el teniente coroneI
Rodon que todos cumplieron con su
deber. distingu endose algunos de
manera notabilisima, pero muy espe.
cialmen:e el teniente Burguete.
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1896-01-17
E in Err ALES.

Aver Sc ce.eoraron las anunciadas
honras funebres en- la Ig'esia de San
Jose.
En- medic del temple Sc elevaba IN
sencillo tumulo adornaio con hermo-
sas coronas. Ell recuerdo sagrado de
la que en- vida fue Sor Joaquina Ber-
gada, Vlce-visitadora de las Hijas de
Ia Carload en- esta provincial.
Ell imponente silencio incitaba el
amino al recogimiento y Ia oracion
piadosa en- suffagio del alma de la que
va no existe. FL esplritu, lleno de
trlsteza, evocaba la imagen de la san
ia que paso q otras moradas. dejan-
donos en- la TERRA eterno sentim ento
por su irreparable perdida.
La melancolia Sc refejaba en- los
rostros de los numerosos concurren
tes al sagrado acto, viendose ALI reu
midas personas pertenecientes a todas
las classes sociales, prueba evidente de
las simpatlas de que gozaba entire
nosotros la fnada.
Las autoridades eclesiasticas, digna-
mente representadas, y ell Seminario
Conciliar. estandolo la Diputacion por
ell seflor Egozcue y el Ayuntamientc
por Ell senior Ledesma, ademas de mu-
chos miembros componentes de. estas
corporaciones, el Asilo de Benedcen-
cia de que fue Superiora la difunta
el de San Ildefonso y coagragacione:
varias y multitud de particulares, rim
dieron el tribute debido en- memoir:
de Sor Joaquina.
Las diversas coronas qae pendlar
del catafalco eran de una eiegancia J
modestia encantadoras, siendo una dc
elias de la Diputacion Provincial, otr;
de las nihas de la Benehcencia, etc
etc.
Ell acto resulto majcs1uoso, con c
sublime sello que la Iglesia imprim'
sus grandes solemnidades.
iOescanse en- paz y de la gloria goc'
la pobre mujer cuya vida Sc consagr,
al bien de todos, buscando para ell
tan solo el sufrimiento y el martirio
> que Dios la premiara dindole en- 81
Reino el sitio privilegisdo de que s
: hizo merecedora
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1896-01-17

"Sepase en- la Isla y fuera de ella
que los asuntos de la guerra, 81 pre-
sentan un aspecto desagradable, por
causas que hoy no tenemos espacio
nj voluntad de explicar, no ofrecen
caracter desesperado, nj siquiera de
gravedad suma. El enemigo, esqui.
vando la persecution de nuestras CO.
lumnas, ha logrado introducirse en- la
provincial de la Habana, y al parecer
intcnta correrse la de Pinar del Rio.
Nuestras fuerzas co 1tin1an persi-
guiendolo, y es probable que hoy
mismo 8 mailana logfen alcan carlo y
aniquilarlo. Aun cuando consigan
escapar momentaneamente, entrar en-
el territorio de Pinar del Rio y con
vertirlo por cortlsimo tempo en- tea
tro de sus depredaciones, va no po
dram volver a Matanzas, nj muchc
menos 4 las Villas. La Inca ferres
de Batabano, convenientemente forti
ficada y atendi1 la. sera para el un va
lladar insuperable. El Occidente K
servira de sepultura. Los caballo
que dejo inutilizados por cansancio
en- su trinsito de Matanzas la Ha
bana, y los demas que con la requisi
Sc obtengan, serdn aprovechados po
nuestros soldados para hacer m S ra
pida la persecution. NJ hay mo Two
por consiguiente, para dudar del prom
to termino de esta algarada, con c
5completo triunfo de nuestras armas.
La discretion aconseja, por tantc
que no Sc acojan rumores pesimista:
mucho menos los que llevan impres
. ell sello de 10 absurdo."
BoletiÌn mercantil de Puerto Rico. (San Juan, P.R.) 18??-1918, 1896-01-17

gin la Erase profunda y justa de
Ayala, de cuyo espfrftu liberal
nadie ha podido dudar. Los an
tiguos asimilistas, los que no
quieren corren las aventuras del
autonomismo, pueden venir a
nuestro campo sin renunciar a sus
ideales. En- nuestras hlas caben
todos los que anteponen la Patria
a Ia politica, los que quieren con-
fundirse con la Nacion en- leyes
y en- sentimientos, como estamos
confundidos en- la sangre y en-
las costumbres.
Nosotros, al reves de nuestros
adversariosa avanzamos con FIR
meza, sin invadir nunca ia Inca
peligrosa que rompe la unidad,
porque ahf principian los extra
vios que traen como corolario los
males que abruman despues a
los pueblos que han prescindidc
de su historic y de su tradicion, y
que no han tornado como ense
nanza las duras lecciones de Ia
experienced ajena.
Contra la divisa dl01de y zen
cerds, predicaremos siempre uni
dad de accion, de pensamiento
de voluntad.
\ Ell triunfo es siempre del ma:
fuerte, y ell mas fuerte es Stem
) pre- ell mas undo, ell mas discipli
nado, el que tiene mayor sacrlfl
clio y abnegacion.
Nuestro partido, por la altez;
de sus propositos y la honrade
de su conducta. merece hoy e
respeto de todos, y no insplr
recelos nj descon6anzas. Lucha
, mos por los intereses, morales
, intelectuales y materiales d.
5 Puerto Rico, a la sombra de i
gloriosa bandera espahola;
$ nos gufan pasiones, nj nos incita
l odios, y por ESQ sumamos cad
dfa mas fuerza en- la opinion,
no tenemos en- nuestras ratrlo
r ricas flas hombres que traten, r
5 mentalmente, de abandonar S
: puesto de honor para dar alient
a a agrupaciones innecesarias
A perturbadoras.