St. Paul daily globe., 1896-04-26


spirit of their instructions The
G o be congratulates both the
base ball management and the public
on the prospect that rowdyism and
base ball are about to part company.
This will not. rob the game of any of
its Kaleidoscope or other strong feat
ures; will not deprive anybody Of the
opportunity to- test his lungs as fre-
quently or as Yehemently as he likes;
but will really give everybody an op-
portunity tc enjoy fully the many good
things happening before him. The
attendance at the games. the largest
this year ever known, is the best pos
sible indications that base ball is very
much alive.
KIEFER's "LAUGH WAS HEARTY.U
At least one1 of the constituents of
Congressman Kiefer has the proper
conception of the uses of governments
and congressman from the Republican
point of view, sthough he will hardly
be satisfied with the way either his
present government or representative
meets him. Having read if he reads,
or heard that this patriotic congress
had forced the secretary of agricul-
ture to resume the buying and dis
tributing of seed among the farmers
Of the nation, he wrote his member,
Mr.. Kiefer, the following letter, which,
as it appears in that gentleman's Of
ficial organ, may be accepted as au-
thentic:
my deer Mister Congressman have a
farm and need grain seed and voted for
you l have been informed to write you for
seed l need seed pleas send me fifteen BUSH
els of barley and fifty Of oats and pleas if
CONVENIENT send some onion seed
The organ says, by way of explana-
ton and excuse, that "the government
does not furnish seed except for exper-
mental purposes which would be
sufficient If it were true. That was Mr..
Morton's idea, and that was the law
prior to this renascence of paternal-
ism; but this congress went into the
seed business promiscuously, emitting
the provision of the former act, that
the seeds thus bought should be "such
as are rare and uncommon to the coun-
try" So Mr.. Morton called for bids
for about every kind Of grain and veg
etable known to our markets, and has
contracted for $4,000 worth
The organ proceeds to say that, on
the receipt Of this letter, Congressman
Kiefer had nothing to do but get
mad or laugh" Why only these alter
natives? What. was there to get mad
at? Why should 1t stir the statesman's
soul to wrath that ,lone of his constit-
uents should ask him to put his theory
of, government sinto practice? If the
government Is to furnish seed at all,
why not furnish. enough? Why send a
poor farmer 1-12S Of a pound Of beet
seed when he needs a pound? What
good will 1-10O of a pound Of pumpkin
seed do the seedless farmer who wants
to plant acres of 1t among his corn?
Or should he wish to supplement his
poultry products. with the succulent
egg plant, what good will 1900 Of
pound of seed to hffn2 Rather should
the heart ofztha cong tsssman boil over
with indignatop at the. miserable
cheese-p pairing parsimony Ola congress
that doledgout seeds in such homeo-
pathic doses instead of giving in help
full measure.
The organ says that Mr.. Kiefer did
not get mad. He accepted the other
alternative and laughed. "Hts laugh
was hearty" we are authoritatfvely
told. 1t is laughable, of course, but not
from Mr. Kiefer's constituents point
Of view. He takes the grim joke of
congress in dead earnest. He will not
laugh should he be informed how his
congressman laughed. He will won
der what he laughed at. But Kiefer
laughed, and Laughed hearty" Prob
ably because there was among his con-
stituents one so previously green as to
think that Mr.. Kiefer's congress was
doing anything but playing politics
in this seed business. But we are sur
prised, net that Mr.. Kfefer laughed,
but that he Is so indiscreet as to laugh
in public in his organ. While his city
constituents will probably laugh with
him, he has few thousand
farmer constituents who may think
1t no laughing matter He should have
gone down into the caverns under the
capitol and let his laugh loose there.
Mr.. Kiefer is not tactful. Joel Heat
wole would not have laughed hearty
at one of his constituents had he pre-
ferred SO absurd a request He would
plantations and polite regrets that
would have made his constituent feel
grateful that congress had made it
impossible for him to get his seeds
and possible to get so charming a letter
from his handsome representative.
Mr.. Kiefer Is not UP to his colleagues
qualifications for soft-soaping the rural
voter, but he might, at least, have
dipped into his especial culture
of arithmetic He might have
told his constituent how small were his
allotments of seeds and how impossible
it was to fill his requisition. assuring
him, however, if hee would reduce the
AMOUNT asked for $50. per cent he would
direct his secretary to have the seed
mailed him. But he missed this fine
opportunity, and let it be recorded
that he laughed. and This laugh was
hearty"