davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14
BRIGHT BITS.

The Very Latest-HOw did Miss Jones
become a literary success so suddenly?
"Oh, she hit on such a charming idea;
she wrote one chapter of a novel and let
the public guess the other forty-n!ne."
Chicago Record.
Fitting Himself for It.-"Yes, grand
ma, when 1 graduate l intend following a
literary career. Write for money, you
know" why, Willie, my dear, you
haven't done anything else since you've
been al. college. Life.
The Awkward Man-Minnle-Hav
you ever danced with Mr.. Clummes?
Mamie-Yes. He isn't very light on his
Minnie-He certainly was not very light
on mine--Indianapons Journal.
still Proud-Yes, brethren, said the
convert, am an humble Christian now,
but in my unregenerate days, 1 fatter
myself that you wouldn't meet finer or
more thoroughbred sinner in a day S
walk.-Cincinnati Enquirer.
-"How many conquests have you made
within the last month";" asked the young
man OF, the piazza of the Florida hotel
one hand" was the reply of the belle
with the five diamond rings.-Y onkers
Statesman.
Il can't help wondering why the De-
fender looked so deep in the water to Dun
ravens eye" Matter of ballast. Iseln
was on board" But he doesn't weigh
fifteen tons" mo; but he has so much
more sand than Dunraven that it seemed
that to the noble earl '-Harper's Bazaar.
-Noosriter-Isnt this changeable
weather distressing?
Hammphat-I rather enjoy it. You see,
Tye. grown to expect it in my business.
How SOP
We'll, we generally have a frost on the
opening night, and the papers roast us
in the morning. "-Philadelphia Record.
Mother (sternly)-Why did you tell that
lie to the teacher?
Johhny-To save somebody from punish
ment.
Mother (molhfel)-I knew there must be
some eXtenuating circumstances. Who
was it you wished to save from punish
ment?
Johnny-Myself.-T Bits.
-Hicks-8Iy daughter says she is go
ing to hang up her stocking tonight, just
as she used to do when she was a little
girl, but as l am going to give her a
piano, 1 don't see how am to get it into
her stocking.
Wicks-Why don't you get her to hang
UP instead one of her dress sleeves?
Hicks-By Jove! l never thought of
that. TIN be just the thing.-Boston
Transcript.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14

There VIII be no war between this coun-
try and Great Britain on account OF the
Venezuela boundary dispute. A way will
be found FOR settling that dispute without
resort 10 force. In our dispatches this
morning IL is said. on alleged good author
ity. that the British government is pre-
pairing 70 open the way Tor its settlement
by suggesting the appointment OF joint
commission. representing Great Britain
and venezuela. to mark out boundary
between British Guiana and Venezuela
with the understanding that If it cannot
reach an agreement a third party shall
be called in-one Of the South American
states probabiy-to act as arbitrator.
It is not known. OF course. that this
plan VIII be adopted. But If it isn't it is
pretty certain that some other will. Great
Britain would hardly care to incur such
sacrifices as she would have to make in
war with this country to defend her
position in a matter about which even
her own people are divided. The tone Of
the English papers-at least some Of them
--indicntes a doubt as to whether the
British government is right in insisting
upon a boundary which It established it.
self. and that. too. against the protest Of
Nenezeula.
The war talk has not been without its
goods effects. Great Britain now under
stands better than she ever did before
that the United States not only insist up
on the Monroe doctrine. but they are will
ing to fight for it. Heretofore. she had
supposed that that doctrine was some
thing concerning which American poiiti-
clans talked a great deal when it suited
their purpose to do so. and about which
the American people cared very little.
Now, however. she understands that the
Monroe doctrine is part of the national
life of this country. ard that it will not
be abandoned as long as the American
people are able TO uphold it, And the 9TH
er nations Of Europe understand the
same thing. 1t was left for this admins
tration to make that fact so clear that
all the world could understand it.
We do not want war with England and
we are not going to rashly invite it, AT
the same time we understand there are
some things worse than war one of them
being failure to protect our national
| honor. Such a failure would affect disas-
triously the national spirit, and then
would come national decay. The war talk
| has brought a better understanding and
that is sufficient compensation for any
| lOggnc q wa faII
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14

In the examination of witnesses alleg-
ing election frauds, in the recent con-
gressional elections in South Carolina,
many amusing things were developed 1t
seems that the negro candidate, the Rev.
Wilson, thought that he was entitled to
the seat of the Hon John l.. McLaurin in
the House of Representatives. The wit
nesses for Wilson were all negroes. One
of them was being examined by Mr.. Nc
Iaurin's attorney. The attorney asked him
why he thought that Wilson was entitled
to the seat, when it was plainly to be
seen that Mr.. McLaurin was elected by
a large majority of the vote cast.
Here is list of over two hundred per-
sons" replied the colored man, who
were at the polls, and if they had been
allowed to vote, it would have been for
the Rev wilson, He thought on that ac-
count Mr. Wilson should have been cleo
ted
Mir. McLaurin's attorney took the list
and asked the witness if he could remeGn-
her the names of all who were there, and
if he knows them personally. The colored
man answered in the Affirmative, and the
attorney asked if George Smith had been
there.
out several more names and receiving the
same answer. he was asked: Was T. 3.
Reed there2"
Yes" the witness replied.
WAS Benjamin Harrison there?
yes" was the answer.
WAS William Mckinley there?"
The reply was yes"
''Why didn't they voter
because they had not received their
registration papers, was the reply.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14
FRS. Lessons in Business.

Now. my son." said the old merchant,
according to Harper's Weekly, while you
are applying yourself to the details of this
business, learning how to buy and how to
sell. how to gauge the taste and needs
Of the great public, how to avoid mis-
takes, how to seize. opportunities-while
you study these things keep always before
you the fact that the basis of all true
business success is absolute, uncomprom-
Using honesty
Father" said the young man, your
business has always been one of large
sales and small profits, has it not?"
You know what l advertise, my son; 1
buy everything direct from the manufac-
turer, and l sell to the consumer at ex-
| actly 7l2 per cent. advance from cost.
Such a business l believe to be as bene-
fetal to the public as any philanthropic
institution. The people should purchase
the necessaries of life at a margin above
first cost sufficient only to pay for the
actual handling of the goods. That is a
fixed principle of mine"
But" said the boy, in a puzzled hest
tating way, ''you had an invoice of lace
curtains to-day at 50 a pair, and l heard
| you give instructions to mark them A.69. -
The old man leaned back in his leather
cushioned swivel chair, smiled blandly, and
told the boy to take pencil and paper.
The expenses of this business last
| year" he said, were 10 per cent. of the
sales Add ten per cent. to your 3d.
There is always possible a shrinkage
in value of stock. always a percentage of
| DdQ ueDlSs always d ndZdIu Ol Unforeseen
| contingencies. Add ten per cent. more"
Three sixty-three."
do you know how much it costs your
| father to maintain himself and his family
| Have you any idea of the expense of edu-
| eating and dressing three boys and three
| girls, paying their way in society, provid-
/ ing them and their mother with coun-
| try home and city home, with servants
and carriages and everything they de-
! sire?"
81 am afraid l have no idea, father"
'Well, it's simply frightful. 1t is in
! fact, 20 per cent. of the entire sales of the
house. Add 20 per cent. Never mind frac-
| tions"
! -Four thirty-six"
There You have arrived by a process
| as clear and open as day, and by the use
| of simple business rules, at the cost of
| those curtains billed at three dollars. Now
! add tx per cent. profit"
u -Four siXty-nine."
That's what I'm going to advertise
! them at; and you will see a great run on
! them tomorrow, for the public has learned
| that all my announcements are absolutely
/ f-eliahla -
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14

About three-fourths OF the cotton crop
has been counted. and. according TO the
weekly statement Of the Financial Chron-
icle, the statistical position OF cotton is
very bullish. The figures show the worlds
visible supply Of cotton OF all kinds to be
4lls,l36 bales. a decrease Of cotton in
sight Of 729.5l5 compared with last year.
a falling of OF 1874 compared with 1895,
and Of 253.72I compared with 1888 Mr.
Henry VI. Neill is on record as predicting
that the final count VIII show the crop
10000 bales less than the $4,000 bale crop
Of 1888; and Mr.. Nell has made reputa-
tion for estimating crops with great &C
curacy.
Meantime the demand for consumption i'm
England has increased largely. The great
strike in the cotton industries has been
ended, and the mills Of Great Britain are
now using goo bales a week more than
they were using in 1858. The demand for
American consumption is also increased,
not less that seventy-three cotton mills
having been built in this country during
last year. The New York Tribune, speak
ing OF SeiH's prediction and the statisti-
cal position. says the prophecy now looks
probable. and that. according to the fore
cast, and the figures given by the Chron-
icle, there is a grave danger that, un-
less the consumption of cotton is extern
sively curtailed. an absolute exhaustion
Of port stocks of the staple in Europe
viii result The effect Of such
condition as Mr.. NELL predicts (Which in
cludes the exhaustion of European port
stocks) would be without parallel since
the war, and could not fail to affect dis
astrously the cotton industry and trade
on both sides of the Atlantic"
The situation, it need hardly be said.
is favorable to cotton producers. The ex-
haustion Of European port stocks is mere
" a possibility. not probability The
producers have for years been trying to
get the statistical position where it would
operate in their favor. 1t seems that they
are about TO get it there at last. The cur
rent short crop will do it. Having worked
down to a very close basis. it would be
foolish of the farmers to overload the
market with a 100000 or 100000 bale
crop next year. BY limiting the cotton
production, and diversifying their crops
as was done during the past season, the
southern farmers may once more. and be-
fore a great while. have the satisfaction
of producing the staple at a good profit
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14
TOLD On senator Cal.

a good many interesting stories are re-
lated OF Senator Wilkinson Call OF
Florida. says the Washington News. This
is one OF the latest:
Soon after Mr.. Call took his seat in the
Senate he gave social function at his
house, ana was advised b. one OF his
colleagues that II he would get an order
from the chairman, as a member Of the
library committee, on the chief Of the bO-
tanical garden, he could get ali the flow
ers necessary FOR his entertainment free
Mr. Call, being a new senator, so the
story goes. thought that il was beneath
his dignity 70 ask for an order" he
consulted fellow senator as TO how he
could get around the. humiliation Of ap-
plying 10 the library committee.
Well said the senator, smith, who
runs the botanical garden, has been there
for a good many years. He is an auto
crat, and would not take an order from
the President if he did not feel ike it.
He is a peculiar man, but al the Same
time. he has q soft side. and If you can
strike him in that quarter, the entire gar
den viii be at your disposal.
what is it2' said the Florida senator,
rubbing his hands. Tel me, and think
l can get at him
4 have not been campaigning in the
Everglades Of Florida for ten years for
nothing"
He Is a scotchnan, and he is a crank
on everything that relates to that coun-
try His pet hobby, however, is Burns.
Tell him that you are an admirer of
ers."
Tell me about Burns" said Call.
He was a poet, you know"
"Oh, yes, l understand" and Off Call
started for the botanical garden.
The scene changes 10 Mr.. Smiths Office
IN the Botanical Garden. Mr.. Smith is in
his shirt sleeves and is surveying his do
main with the air of an absolute proprie-
tor.
MIR. Cali enters and introduces himself.
. Smith invites him to tao a seat, but does
not warm up in the least. United States
senators were no novelty to him.
Mr. call opens the conversation and
tells how much he admires the Scotch peO-
pie; in fact, some of his ancestors on his
mothers side were Scotch.
Smith unbends little and begins to
manifest some interest in his visitor. Call
perceives that he has made an impress
sion, and proceeds to play his trump card.
of all the poets in the world" he ex-
claimed, Burns is my favorite. He is
certainly the greatest poet the world has
ever known, not even barring Shakes
pearei'
for long black bottle and invited the
Florida senator TO take a drop of Scotch
whisky.
The invitation was accepted and the
! liquor was poured cut. Mr.. Call says
that he felt like dancing jig at that mo-
! ment. As he raised his glass TO his lips
| he leaned over and, slapping Smith on the
| shoulder, said: Yes | believe l have
read every line that Billy Burns ever
There was a sound of crashing glass
/ Mr.. Call made hasty exit from the Office.
He missed his flowers and also his drink.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14
Personal.

in speaking the other day Of his de-
feat AT the recent elections Wat Hardin
OF Kentucky said: Il am too proud 10
whine. and too good to curse; and as my
remarks would have 10 come under these
heads, 1 pass"
Capt. J. ". Wilson. who was mem
Der Of Dr. Kane's Arctic expedition in 1853.
in an address in NeV York the other day
abused Dr. Kane, With whom he was at
uaE8ers points all the time, and SAID ne
was not what the world thought nm;
HAD Dr. Kane lived six months longer
continued Capt. Wilson. he would nave
occupied far different md a much less
enNiaDle position I'm the minds OF the pun
nc IMAM ne occupies to-day nave IN my
sate to-day documents which, II published
would send a peal Of thunder from one
end OF this country TO the other. 4 iooK
nave been asked to put these documents
into print, and IL is possible that 1 may
yet do so. But il ] do IL will only be in
sef-defense. Surely the living have some
rights as well as the dead
Death cut both wide and deep in the
year 1885. says the Chicago Times-H Herald
In politics. with many others who hac
strutted through their less conspicuous
days. there died Lord Randolph Churchill,
ex-senator /. r. Gray, Frederick Douglass
lsmatl Pasha- ex-Khedive Of Egypt; eX-
Senator Wilson, Hugh McCulloch, Sec
rotary Gresham. Stambulon, Justice jack
son, Gen. Malone. Rustem Pasha, Count
Won Taafe and Allen G. Thurman. Science
and letters lost HUXLEY. John stuart
Blackie. Prof. Dana, Pasteur President
Seelye, Reginald Poole. DR.. Battey. Alex
andre Dumas, Eugene Field, George Au-
gustus Sala, and a host OF lesser men.
Chicago suffered in the death OF Mr.
Field, James w. Scott, Charles Atwood,
Anton G. Hesing. John Dean eaton ana
Leonard Volk Among others whom The
year has added to the long death roll are
Baron Tauchnitz, Gen. Eadeau, Dr.
George Root, Henry Moore, Henry O.
Houghton. Gen. John Newton Calvert
Naux, Lord Clarence Paget. Rear Admiral
Shufeldt and the Grand Duke Alexis OF
Russia.
The Rev. DR.. Kerr b. Upper of Den
yer has accepted the call to the pas
torate of the First Baptist church OF
Philadelphia, recently extended to him.
and viii enter upon his new duties OF
March I. DR.. Topper is a Georgian, haV-
ing been born at Washington, Ca, on
Feb. 2 1885, He entered the University
of Georgia when he was -, and was grad
graduate of the institution. The next
year he entered the theological seminary
at Charlottesville, Va, and was gradu-
ated at the age of 81 His first charge was
at Charlottesville. He went thence 70
Paducah, KY, and after three and one
half years of the ministry there he re-
moved to Chicago, where he served as
During the following ten years his work
was at Grand Rapids. Mich, where he
left church with hundreds of members
when he went to Denver in 1890 The
First Baptist church of Denver, of which
DR.. Upper has been pastor since that
time, has above 200 members being the
largest church of that denomination in
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14
PuhIic OnInion Deaed.

The newspapers Of Tennessee are ask
ing why Chief Justice Snodgrass of that
state does not resign. In asking this
question they are undoubtedly voicing pub
lie sentiment They have dealt rather
gently with the chief justice thus far,
but it is evident from their tone that they
viii not continue to do so.
Chief Justice snodgrass attempted to
kill lawyer a. few weeks ago for making.
in a communication published in a news
paper, statements which appeared to cast
a doubt upon his integrity in respect to a
matter which had been before the supreme
court of the state The chief justice com
mitted the offense with a pistol, and il
was not his fault that ne failed to kill
the lawyer.
What excuse has this judge for remain
ing upon the bench? He has proved his
unhtness for the high position he holds
1t is expected of him that he will en-
force the law against those who are guilty
of just such offenses as that with which
he stands charged.
1t would seem as If he ought to see the
improperly of remaining on the bench
Could he feel free to affirm a verdict
against a man convicted of carrying a
concealed pistol or for using his pisto
with felonious intent? A pretty state Of
affairs it is for the chief justice of a great
state to be sitting in judgment upon crimi
nails when he himself is the defendant il
case in which an extremely serious of
Tense is charged. What respect have tn,
people for such a judge and what respec
would they have for his decisions in crimi
nal eases?
There is no way, of course to get tn,
chief justice off the bench except by i'm
parchment a man. however, who ha!
reached the high position of chief justic,
of a state should not wait for impeach
ment proceedings in a case like that pend
ing against Chief Justice Snodgrass. As
Stunning that he acted hastily in taking tn,
law into his own hands, is it not better
that he should suffer for his fault thar
that the whole state should suffer by hav
ing the courts brought into disrepute?
The question of the chief Justices retire
ment is one of such Importance to tn,
people that it is not to be wondered a
! that the state papers have taken it up ant
are calling on him to resign.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14
MUNYON'S
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The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14
How Stewart Was Chased Out.
From the Chicago Tribune (Rep).

In his speech to the Senate Thursday
Stewart of the rotten borough state called
Nevada said: Not until we have free
coinage of silver will we have financial
independence" ETC., and that 'as long
as the gold standard is maintained in the
Great Britain" There was another occa-
SION before Stewart turned populiSt
when he said from his place in the Senate:
II want the standard gold, and no paper
money not redeemable in gold. No paper
money, the value of which is not ascer-
tanned. No paper money that will organ
lie a gold board to speculate in it. Gold
is the universal standard of the world
Everybody. knows what dollar in gold
is worth" He denied in August 1895,
that he had uttered such words but
Senator Sherman faced him with the
record. and then IL was that Stewart
turned tail upon the republican party
and joined the fiat populists. 1t is fact
shown upon the same record that Stewart
was one OF those who voted to strike out
the silver dollar from the list of coins.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14
The Taxes.

When the tax man goes his rounds
The direst poverty abounds.
She has placed her new frock
With her uncle in hook.
Her new bicycle, too
Out of sight quickly flew.
His gold watch and fob
Are not worth two bob
Her brooch, rings and pin
Are all made of tin.
He has placed his new pants
In the care of his aunts.
And bank accounts all
Are now very small.
Each man now is broke,
The whole towns in soak.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-01-14

1t is to be expected that the three re-
naming territories, Arizona, New Mexico
and Oklahoma, will make strenuous et-
forts to attain to the dignity of state
hood az the very earliest possible mo-
ment. Their delegates IN Washington are
now doing everything they can to that
end. There are already too many rotten>
borough states in the union, each with as
much power in the Senate as is possessed
by the most populous and wealthy state.
The interests of the country are at this
day menaced by the senators representing
states that do not possess the popula-
ton Of some of the Georgia counties.
Nevada, for instance, has about the pop
ulation of the city of Savannah, and yet
Nevada has two votes in the Senate.
The president of Venezuela may shortly
have an interesting little family row on
his hands, which he will be under the
necessity of quoting before he starts in
to thrash Great Britain. There have been
many stories of insurrection in vene-
zuela recently. and a Herald cable says
it has been learned that the governments
supply of guns and ammunition is alarm
ingly short of what it was supposed was
stored in the arsenals. If the war SUD-
plies are gone, it is possible that they
have found their way into the hands
Of the opposition to the president Or it
may be that there has been jobbery in
the filing of government contracts.