The morning times., 1896-03-01

The Congress Oi TIE lhltcu St1tcss iedu-
fug debating society of the weird, ana
as such. in connection with its claim TO an
fiquity and its record of having grown up
with The country entitled 10 great es-
teen. i, nevertheless, in the abstract, far
from being Iaodel FOR the emulation of
the economically minded; nor is II IN all
respects the eMemplficatiOn Of That extra
ordinary propriety which tradition as
cribes TO IL.
The Congressional Record, tinc-honored
Journal that il is, and more or less faithful
mirror. AZ well, of the Congressional types
and shadows, gives. unless emasculated 10y
order. daily evidence of the productivity
not TO say intempcrance of speech 10 when
the average legislator is prone TO indulge
when posing for the benefit of his con-
stituency and the galleries.
Funny little incidents are chroncled from
day 10 da s. and choice figures of speech are
as often portrayed upon the Record pages,
the running debates affording no end of
fooc for reflection when viewed in sn-
houettc. after the printers have had wllack
at them.
II should not Toe charged that the solons
spend more money i'm the endless chain
Of debate than is saved by reducing the APP
propriatiuns to low water mark. III would
not Tee quite correct And yet il is urged
ihcrc are deficiency bills urgent and
otherwise. that ought to be placed in the
debit columns when taking stock after
every cheesc-paring campaign that is in
augGrated. prosecuted and fought 10
finish on the party platform plan.
But the observer viii take note OF the time
consumed at every days session in the
furmalttics Tie compliments, the badinage
of the debate or the things and the expense
of printing it.
TwEEDLEDUM AND TwEEDLEDEE.
Extracts from the spacious columns OF
the official organ, selected at random
and without regard TO date, will tell the
story.
Under the small-cap heading OF "CoTec-
tiou." the Following occurs, February IL:
Mr. Cannon-Mr. Speaker, by direction
Of
The Spcakcr-The gentlcmanfrom Illinois
MIR Kem-Mr speaker
Tie Speaker-The gentleman from Illinois
j. recognized.
Mr. Kem-Mr. Speaker, rise 10 qUcs-
ron of privilege.
The Speaker-Then the gentleman from
The gentleman from Nebraska proceeds to
refer in a sarcastic vein TO tie fact that
ms speech and that of some other gentle
ann has been hopeleSsly uninterrupted. As
il appears in tie columns of the Congress
ional family 5ournal. the head and front
or the Grafton is clearly and mmista kably
Ken. hut tie remainder comprises utter
anccs OF a straight. radical goldbug.
The voice is the voice OF Jacob. but the
land is that OF Esau. and Mr.. KEN hastens
10 assure The press gallery and the ooun
try that he is not the author or the OBJ
noxious sentiments, which his friend, the
editor OF tho Record. has ascribed TO him.
"A member inquiries: -" Was tie gentle
man hyPnotized?'
To this Mr.. Ken retorts: The gentleman
asks me If claim that ! was hypnotized.
What put such a fool notion as that in your
Icad?"
This forccful rcjoiuder squelched the
member" hut did not close the discussion,
tlic outcome OF which, after consumption
oI quite half an hour. was that the blame
for the objectionable mixture was placed
upon the printer. The office cat seems
10 have escaped censure, for once in its
cleckCred career.
Atanothcr time they were discussing Tho
Secretary Of Agriculture, and the rem
nants Of Ire sarcasm left from previous
canvass OF the same topic were quite
visible in the chamber.
M-. Livingston Docs the gentleman know
the present assistant?
Reference was made 10 the assistant chic
81 a division in bureau described as th'
most important in the nepartemtn.
Mr. WadSworth rcplied-I have met him
that is all.
Mr. Livingston Does the gentleman know
tina; he is nothing bat an n. ID. medica
doctor?
Mr.. Wadsworth-I am not aware Of tina
fact.
Mr. Livingston Does the gentleman know
that ne Superviscs the work OF eight or lei
scientific men?
Mr. Wadsworth No doubt he perform
the duties devolving upon him as assist
ant.
Mr. Livingston VIII the chairman of IL
Committee on Agriculture claim on thi
floor that il is suitable for such a man L
supervise the work Of these scientifi
men?
Mr.. Wadsworth The gentleman makes
statement in regard 10 the character c
this officer. know nothing"
Mr. Livingstcn-No Not statement aboU
his character.
Mr.. wadsworih presume he is con
potent for the position or lee would No
occupy it.
Mr.. Livingston He is not q vcterinar
surgeon or scientific man.
APT FIGURE OF SPEECH.
Mr. Wadsworth here made a suggeStio