davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Der fortschritt. [volume] (New Ulm, Minn.) 1891-1915, 1896-11-12
Nemeite Na6ri@ten.
Grs1 0ni0im uytt" bc0naoi9t.

9onolulu II, 7. Nop. Der Prds
iibent Dole uno Iein &abinet 'haben Bit
'@r : &0nistn 2iliutolani einitimmtQ
parbpnntrt.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
CHURCH DIRECTORY.

First Presbyterian Church, on Frederick 81
between New and Market streets, services
II a. m. and p. m. Pastor. Rev. A. NJ. Fraser
Second Presbyterian church corner Freder
ick and Lewis streets. Services at IL a. m
and 8. Pastor, Rev. VIM. Cumming.
Emmanuel Episcopal Church, worship on
West Frederick st. Services at II a. M, and
p. m,, Rector. Rev. R. c. Jett.
Trinity Episcopal church, Main street, be-
tween Lewis and Church streets. Services at
II a. m, and s p. m. Rector, Rev. W. Q. HUI
linen
United Brethren churel, Lewis street, be
tween Main and johnson streets. Services at
ii a. m and p. m. Pastor, Rev. ]. D DON
ovan. L
Methodist church, Lewis street, between
Main and Frederick streets. Services at IL
m. and p. m. Pastor, Rev. J. H. Boyd, d. D
Christ Evangelical Lutheran church Lew
is street, between Main and Frederick streets
Services at Ii a. m. and p. m. Pastor Rev.
II. F. Shealy.
Baptist church. corner Main and Washing
ton streets. Services at II a. m. and 8 d. m
Pastor, Rev. NJ L. Wood.
st. Francis Roman Catholic, North Augusta
street, Mass at and 1880 a. m. vespers and
beneeicSionof Most Blessed Sacrament al
p. M Pastor. Rev. Father Mcverr7.
Main and Water streets. Services at D. m.
Sunday.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
Bad For His Business.

Mick O'Flannigan of Liverpool is an
Irish gentleman who pursucs the hum
BILE but useful occupation Ct ragman,
though at one time he served her majes-
ty in foreign parts as a soldier Of the
line. Mick is great orator in his way,
frequently addressing local meetings, at
which he generally draws upon his mil
itary experience for appropriate illustra-
Lie,4l.s.
On recent occasion nc " <asrf,,..
ing to prove that even a savage state il
better than the present con dition Of Ire
land.
Gentlemen, . he exclaimed, II saw
little children cut in Africa there. They
had no clothes, it [. is true. They were
naked, but they were freeP'
"Bad place fer q ragman, MickP
shouted small boy at the rear, and the
orator collapsed amid the laughter OF
the audience. London Telegraph.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
Altogether Too Suspicious.

A very worthy visitor, recently de-
ceased, of a charitable organization in
the south erd related the following in
cident in his official experience: ''You
know our conference is particular to see
that the parties to whom it gives relief
are worthy. I was assigned to visit the
house of woman who said that she had
no husband, son or other male support.
After being in her tenement long enough
to note rAat she was apparently poor I
noticed mans hat OH table near the
door at which l entered and began to
doubt that she was bereft of all male
comfort or support, as she represented.
Whose hat is that?' asked
'She looked surprised and did not
seem ready to answer. Then my suspi-
cions Of sinister visitations were aroused,
and my imagination conjurcd up a male
visitor to the widow, who must have
passed into the adjoining apartment
when he heard me coming up stairs
leaving his hat as an unthought Of wit
ness.
Madam, said with increased Sc
verify, Il cannot authorize relief sent to
you if you are deceiving us in regard to
male support or if you have men COM
ing here whose presence you are asham-
ed to acknowledge Now, I ask you
again, whose hat is that?'
" Why, sir, she answered, with an
expression of injury and surprise, isn't
that your own hat, that you left there
as you came in the door?'
1T was my turn to be surprised, and
seeing the manner in which l had got
into an awkward predicament by over
suspicion was obliged to back out Of it |
as gracefully as could by saying: Mad
am, the joke is ON me- Twill order the
aid that you need from our confer
ence Boston Globe.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
Engraving the Motto.

Very few inscriptions are available
for engraving on wedding rings, lockets,
bracelets, etc., writes Mrs. Garrett Web
ster in The Ladies' Home Journal, as
the space for engraving is SO limited.
For this reason the Hebrew word "Miz-
pah, with it's small form and exquisite
sentiment, is, and has always been, a
great favorite between lovers. ''Love
inspires love, " "Love today while we
may, ""God saw thee most fit for me, !"
Glove and trust, No heart more true
than mine to you, ""I am thine, thou
art mine, " and it's well known French,
German and Latin forms are all great
favorites. A charming fashion is the us
age of two rings, in each one of which
half the phrase is engraved, the two
when read together giving the complete
quotation. The last quoted sentiment is
the favorite for this purpose. Latin and
French phrases are frequently used in
this connection because Of their brevity
''Prendre moi tel que je suis, - ''Take
me just as l am;'' ''Tuam tuebor, - 81
will defend thee;'' "Semper fidelis, -
"Always faithful :" "Une je servirai, "
zone I will serve"-are few Of the
most used phrases, with their transla-
tiOnS.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
Golf Under Difficulties.

Golf is played at Buluwayo under
somewhat difficult conditions. Balls, if
lost, cannot be replaced easily, and not
only have ''caddies'' to keep their eyes
wide open when stroke is made, but
the player must have one eye on the ball
in its flight ard another on any bit of
scrub in which native may be lurking.
A slight squint these circumstances
would seem to be an advantage rather
than otherwise. The native does not
want to sassegai the player, but only
to get possession Of the ball. Having
secured that and got away, he will
have holes pierced through the ball SO
that he may string it as the most prom
inent gem among the beads Of his neck
lace for full dress, and thus adorned he
will strut ts proudly as if that golf ball
were the KOhinoOr.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
Playing With Words.

Nearly everything is subject to anger.
Sometimes even river will foam at
the mouth.
There are 10 corns on the foot Of a
mountain.
No bracelet is ever found ON an arm
cf the sea.
Even the canalboat has a stern way
Of doing things.
Roses are books within whose leaves
is found the honey CT natures thought.
Don't stalk through life Even the cab
bage does that.
Don't brag about your beard. Even
such common thing as barley has a
beard.
Nature and humanity are kin. Even
some flower gardens have tulips.
Some farmers are smaller potatoes
than those they raise Florida Times
Union.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
And All Was Well.

They met by chance on Michigan ave-
nue-a big man and little man--and
accidentally bumped into each other.
Shaking his fist at the big man, he
shouted:
"You did that ON purpose!'
"No, didn't
''I say you did! Will you fight me
right here and now?''
81 am no fighter"
tackle mep'
''No, I'm not; but I'll bide my time. I
can wait.
"Going to hit me with brickbat
some dark night, are your
'sNo, sir. I shall take a manly re-
venge''
''Have me arrested, eh?'
''No, sir. am going to California.
When l get there, I shall box up stone
weighing about 20 pounds AID send it
to you by express G. o. D. 1t will cost
you about s14 to pay the charges -
"But won't receive it."
'sOh, yes, you will. Curiosity to know
what is in the box will be toe strong for
you. You'll take it quick enough, and
my revenge will be complete
ssSee here, old fellow" remarked the
little man, after a moments thought,
81 was too fast have wronged you,
and beg your pardon. Let's shake and
make up
And then they shook, and then all
was well. Detroit Free Press.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22

A correspondent, whose home new
ly arrived visitor in Bulawayo describes
as "a very pretty place about two miles
out of town." informs South Africa
that Rhodesia is a fine country for
clothes. A smart evening dress, which
she has only lately had out from home,
while hanging i'll the wardrobe accom-
modated rat between the silk and lin
ing. The horrid little beast nibbled a
hole the size of hand on each side Of
the skirt She muses. that if human in
habitants do not fancy ones clothes the
white ants do. Failing them, you have
flat beetles, and, supposing they desert
you, the rat comes III, so no cne can say
fine raiment is wasted out there. "The
wasps build nests in your candle shades,
and the caterpillars or something weave
or spin cocoops in your curtains.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
The Joke Was on the Boys.

"Assayers are the common butt in all
mining camps, and, as rule, believe
they get it in the neck undeservedly, !"
said a well known mining man.
''For example" said he, ''you re-
member that story of Mark Twain's,
how the boys up i'll Utah got hold Of a
chunk of a Mormon's grindstone and
worked it off On the camp assayer? He
got an assay of $500 to the ton in silver
out of that grindstone, and the boys ran
him out of camp. That was true story,
and yet, after these many years, let me
tell you that assayer was all right. You
see, in the early days the Mormons used
to cut their grindstones out of what aft
erward was known the world over as
Silver Cliff. That cliff was sand car
Donate, and eventually it was discovered
to be one of the most wonderful depos-
its of silver ore the world has ever
known. But that was too late to help
the poor devil Of an assayer who sam
pied the grindstone. ARIZONA Repub-
1icaD
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
Petrified Forests.

The regions of the Little Colorado riv-
er in Arizona abound in wonderful veg
etable petrifcations, whole forests being
found in some places which are hard as
flint, but which look as if but recently
stripped Of their foliage. Some Of these
stone trees are standing just as natural
as life, while others are piled across
each other just like the fallen monarchs
of real wood, forest. Biologists say
that these stone trees were once covered
to the depth of 1000 feet with mari,
which transformed them from wood to
solid rock. The mari, after the lapse of
ages, washed out, leaving some of the
trees standing in an upright position.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22

fer in the world. Lotions, plasters, creams
and cosmetics cannot make as good a com.
plexion as health can. They cannot hide
the story of ill-health. They merely EN-.
phasize it. Health shows in clearress of
eyes and skin, in redneSs of lips and vivac-
ity of manner and expression. Disease is
proved positively by the absence of these
things. When woman sees the indica-
t1ons of iil-health in the face, she may with
almost absolute certainty look for the cause
In one or both of two conditions s-consti.
patton, and arrangement of the organs dis
tinctly feminine. These things in them.
selves are in some degree related, and nine
tenths Of all the sickness of women come
from them. DR.. Pierce's Favorite Prescrip-
tion will cure permanently and positively
any so-called female complaint" DR..
Pierce's Pleasant Pellets will cure constipa-
Gon. There is no reason i'll the world why
woman should not be perfectly healthy It
rests with herself If she will take these
truly wonderful remedies, and follow few
hygienic measures, she may become per-
fectly strong and healthy in all ways She
Hollows and angles will give place to full
ness and grace. She will be that noblest
and most beautiful of all creation-a per-
feet woman. All druggists sell DR.. Pierce's
medicines, but if you care to know more
about them and to know all of the grandest
medical truths, send II one-cent stamps to
cover cost of mailing only, and a complete
copy of DR.. Pierce's 1908 page book, The
Peoples Common Sense Medical Adviser"
will be sent postpaid. 1t is veritab1e
medical library, complete in one volume.
Several finely illustrated chapters are de-
voted to the consideration of diseases of
women and their successful home treat
ment. Address, Worlds Dispensary Med
tcal Association, 663 Main ST., Buffalo, NY.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22

DR.. Charles Sedgewick Minot, pro-
fessor Of histology and enbryology in
the Harvard Medical school, backs up
his theory of the law of growth by the
results of several years of observation
upon guinea pigs, dogs, rabbits, ferrets
and other small animals, as well as Bos-
ton school children. He says that in all
growing animal organisms from the
period of birth to death there is steady
less Of the power to grow, contrary to
the general belief that this loss begins
later in life. The body develops all the
time, but the power to keep up that de-
velopment steadily decreases after birth,
and it decreases much more rapidly at
first than later in life. A guinea pig
two days old will gain 10 per cent of
its weight in the next two days. But
the twenty fifth addition ofi 10 per cent
to its weight will take the pig 08 days.
The law is the same with animals and
man
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
A Coincidence.

The English press deems it an inter-
esting coincidence that President Kru-
ger lost a thumb by accident, while
Gladstone lost a finger It is recalled
that Gladstone, i'll describing the ampu-
tation of this finger, once said: ''The ab-
sence of pain sometimes amounts to
pleasure. 1t was once my fate to have a
finger cut off, and recollect perfectly
we'll that when the surgeons ceased to
hack me was more delighted than I
can express. thought I never expert
enced SO lively pleasure.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22

The nikado is the religious head of
the japanese rs well as their ruler. His
place is hereditary, and it has been filled
by members of his family for more than
2, 500 years. His is incomparably the
most ancient lineage known. The mika-
do is the one hundred and twenty-sec-
ond of the line. The founder Of it, whose
hope of posterity in his widest dreams
could not have equaled the result, was
contemporary with Nebuchadnezsal, $50
B. G. Of the seven great religions
enumerated by Max Muller as possess
ing Bibles, the mikado's family is older
than five.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
MANY dreaded Grca. Man.

Hideyoshi is enc Of the greatest men
in Japanese history. His relics are as
numerous as those cf Washington. In a
monastery net far from Yokohama the
guide shows the visitor a skull which,
it is declared, is the veritable headpiece
Of the great departed.
Phillips Brooks saw this relic when
he was in Japan.
'sWhy,' said he, 81 thought Hideyo-
shi had an enormous head. This skull
is very small.
Yes" sad tie guido, 'but that was
whoa he WAS 13ye.rs old!'-New York
Drpcr
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
DIRECTORY OF LODGES.
MisoNIC LODGE.


Staunton Lodge No. Is, A. F. and A. M, meets
every second and last Friday night in each
month"; in Masonic Temple Main street. Jas.
M. Lickliter,W. M; B. A. Eskridge, sec'y.
UNION ROYAL ARCH CHAPTER.
No. 2 meet third Friday in every month, In
Masonic Temple, on Main street. w.w.Mc
Guf1n. High Priest A. A. Eskridge, Sec'y.
ODD FELLOWS LODGE;
Staunton Lodge, No. As, l. o. o. F. meets
cry Thursday night in Odd Fellows Hall, owe
Wayt's drug store, on Main street. John
Fretwel Noble Grand; C. A. Grafton, Sec
KNIGHTS OF HONOB LODGE.
Staupton Lodge. No. 756, Kr- -shts of Honor
meets every first a.;1 third Tuesday in each
month, in Pythian Hall, Main street. w. L.
Olivier, Dictator; W. A. Burnett, Recorder.
MOUNTAIN CITY LODGE.
No. 116, 1. o. G. T., meets every Friday night
in their lodge room over Wayt's drug store on
Main street. A. S. woodhouse, Chief Templar
F. B. Kennedy, Sec'y.
DISTRICT LODGE.
No. %, 1. o. G. T., meets every three months
". u L. .. ii.
District Secretary
ROYAL ARCANUM.
Augusta Council, No. 400, Royal Arcanum
meets every second and fourth Tuesday in the
month, at Pythian Hall, Main street. W. w
Robertson, Regent; Jos. B. Woodward, Sec-
retary.
SONS OF TEMPERANCE
Charity Division M A Sons nj TamnnraDca
meets every Monday night at Odd Fellows
all. w. A. Rapp, Worthy Patriarch; John
d. Coffelt Sec'y.
UNIFORMED RANK, KNIGHTS OF
PYTHIAS.
E. B. Stuart Division, No. 10, meets second
and fourth Mondays each month at Pyth1an
Hall. Sir Knight Captain, F. B. Berkley;S
Knight Recorder, S. H. Rosenbaum.
KNIGHTS OF PYTHIAs.
Valley Lodge, No. IS, K. of p, meets every
Monday night at Castle Hall, on West Main
street, over DR.. Wayt's drug store. c. 7. Ham
mond, Chancellor Commander; AIbes
Keeper of Records and Seal.
KNIGHT TEMPIARs.
Staunton Commandery, No. 8, Knights Tenn
plar, meets first Friday night in every month
in Masonic Temple, on Main street. W. b.
McChesney, Eminent Commander; A. A. E b
ridge, Recorder.
ONEIDA TRIBE, NO. sS, i. O. r. M,
Meets in their wigwam, in va1z Building
every Wednesday at sth run 3oth breath
setting of the sun. ]. d. Anthony, sacher-
James W. Blackburn chief of records. In
visiting brothers welcome.
AMERICAN LEGION OF HONOR.
Valley Council No. 1856 meets on the first and
third Mondays in each month Commando
A. S. Woodhouse; secretary. DIR. J. NJ. Hange
collector, Isaac c. Morton. Jr.
CATHOLIC HIBEBNIAN BENEFICIAL
SOCIETY.
Meets first Sunday In every month in Their
hall on the church lot. M. T.. B presi.
dent; J. j. Kilgalen, FIRST vice-president: ]. }
Murphy, second vice president; d.. O,ConnelI
recording secretary.
"sTONEwALL" BRIGADE BAND.
Band meets every Monday and Thursday
orchestra, every Wednesday, at Sp. M, In City
Hall. Mr.. j. M. Brereton director
J. A. Armentrout, president, and c. Harry
Haines, secretary.
CHAMBER OF COMMERCE..
Monthly meetings, Fourth Tuesday in tn
month at7:30 O'Clock. Room in City Hal built
ing aacWttz, president; J. G. Shields, secre.
sarys
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
rar.1amentary Compliments.

Talking of parliamentary success,
there is story that Mr.. Disraeh once
said of Sir William Harcourt, ''He has
the three essential qualifications for sue
cess in politics. fine person, loud
voice and no principles - This saying
was repeated to Sir William llarcourt,
who observed that, leaving out the first
two qualifications, it might alno5t be
applied to Dizzy himself. London
Saturday RevieW.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
Can't Drink Pure Water.

Arabs in the desert have contracted
strange prejudice against running wa
ter, and they will only drink what they
find in some stagnant pool. So much
has this become matter Of habit with
them that, while the most poisonous
looking water agrees with them admi-
rably, pure running water will make
them violently sick
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22

Talking on another occasion with
Wagner about public opinion, the chan
cellor said: "You doubtless remember
the saying Of Napoleon I that three
shrieking women will make more noise
than thousand silent men It is there
fore very absurd of us to attach so much
Importance to the shrieking women Of
public opinion. True public opinion is
that which is the outcome of certain po-
itical, religious and social convictions,
Of very simply kind, deep down in the
national life, and to recognize and give
effect to this is the task of the true
statesman. I might call it the undercur-
rent of public opinion. Hence it is that
l have never reckoned with our parlia-
mentaly screamers, and consequently
I have always had the satisfaction of
having enlisted on my side the public
opinion by which set any store The
national assembly in ST. Paul's Frank
fort, and the Union parliament at Er-
furt were both in point of fact compos-
ed OF excellent speakers, and yet what
remains of them now? Swallowed up
and forgotten; such is the singers
curse "-Bismarck's Table Talk.
A Soft hearted Statesman.
The late Charles Floquet, who had
been at the head Of the government of
The French republic in more than one
ministry, was o redouhtable fighter il
politics. His extreme beneyolence was
sometimes taken advantage of By hia
Once, when prime minister, Floquet
had signed an order for the dismissal Of
a functionary who did not properly per-
form his duties and could not be made
to do so. A friend OF this funeticnsry,
who had access to the minister and who
knew his characteristic in. this respect,
said to N. Floquet about the man:
"You could not do otherwise, MIR.
Minister, for the man is incorrigible.
But it's too bad he has eight children. "
''Eight childrenp' exclaimed Floquet.
eyes, sir. There are eight Of Them"
NJ Floquet dropped the order for the
mans dismissal upon the table reflect
lively.
"But, Mr.. Minister - said the friend,
yOu C1l IieiIuly bS f5O'NIAAOtA W COi1.'ie
erations of benevolence in such mat
ter.''
'I suppose not. But eight childrenl
Eight children are a lot to take care of
in these times"
Floquet put the dismissal away in a
pigeonhole and said, with an air of
great severity:
'sSend this fellow to me tomorrow
The next day the troublesome official
came. M. Floquet gave him scolding
and said to him that he ought to be dis
charged, and that he certainly would be
but for his eight children. This an
nouncement was as good as an assurance
Of perpetuity in Office to the lazy func-
tionary, for he certainly took no step to
reduce the number Of his children. He
did no better i'll his work, but held his
place as long as M. Floquet was In Of
fice.-Youth's Companion.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22

AS jolly as a sand boy' represents
the hopping to and fro Of marine in
sect seen everywhere along cur coasts,
whose leaps give tie idea of mirth and
iollity.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
RATES OF ADVERTISING

- @-AAA "a >0tAANA AA04
lie if it wanted to.
\ The glass has moth.
4 ing to gain by fiat
|, terry. IF the roses of
' health and plump
ness of beauty are
leaving your face,
your mirror will tell
you so. You can see
for yourself you are
in danger of losing
tn e a d m i iration n
which is every wo-
m a ms d ue. You
may not really real
ize it, but health is
the greatest bea,1ti,
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22

The chameleon, which is said to feed
upon nothing but air, has of all animals
the nimblest tongue. Swift.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22

Staunton Lodge No. 13, A. F. and A. NJ, meets
every second and last Friday night in each
month, in Masonic Temple, Main street. Jas.
NJ. Lickliter, w. M; B. A. Eskridge, Secy.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
"sToNEwALL" BRIGADE BAND.

Band meets every Monday and Thursday
orchestra, every Wednesday, at p. M, In CITY
Hall. Mr.. j. M. Brereton, director
]. A. Armentrout, president, and C. Harry
Haines, secretary.
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
UNION ROYAL ARCH CHAPTI

Staunton Lodge, No. As, 1. o. o. F. meets
cry Thursday night in Odd Fellows Hall, owe
Wayt's drug store, ON Main street. John G
Fretwen Noble Grand; C. A. Grafton, Sec
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
CHAMBER OF COMMERCE..

Monthly meetings, Fourth Tuesday in tn q
month at7:30 O'Clock. Room in CITY Hal builS
ing aacwttz president; J. G. Shields. secre-
0ry = -a-l,F
Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1896-04-22
ROYAL ARCANUM.

Augusta Council, No. 400, Royal Arcanum
meets every second and fourth Tuesday in the
month, at Pythian Hall, Main street. W. W
Robertson, Regent; JOS. B. Woodward, Sec-
retary.
The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1896-07-17
For SAN FRANCISCO:

Steamers of the above Companies will
call at Honolulu on their way from
Hongkong and Yokohama to the above
mort on or about the following dates: