The people's journal. (Pickens, S.C.) 1891-1903, 1896-08-27
BILL ARP ON BABIES.
Snorc; You'll Wake the Baby
Education Ought to be Mixed
With Labor

With Labor.
julius Caesar was a very great man.
He was Democrat ard the leader of
his party when only thirty three years
old, and held tho highest Office before
he was forty. But don't understand
what made him cut slice out Of the
middle of the year and namo it July.
And his Gus did the same thing and
named it August. Ii they wanted to
dismembcr the year and add two more
months why didn't they take it OF the
tail end and lap them on to Decembcr
| don't like July nor August nohow. 1t
seems to me they get hotter and hotter
as the years roll on. | can't work in
my garden. 1t is SO warm that can't
gather the vegetables nor NOV grass
for the COW with any comfort. | sweat
| all over with perspiration and have to
change my garments cvcry day. We
don't go TO bed until Il o'clock and
-.~'" ~i""r good fo" u hnun ftnr hut
| reckon it will come all right again
| before long. | reckon 80. 1t always
does. Whatever is is right.
My wife borrowed the baby again
last night. Ever and anon she has to
nave Il baby to stay over night and
sleep with her to remind her OF the
| good old times when she nurscd her
| own and fondlcl them and patted them
! In the restless night. So little Caro-
! line, who is the Youngest prandchild,
was lctt with her to comfort her and it
made both happy, for the little thing
loves its grandma and hardly know $
which mother she belongs to. [ got to
sleep about midnight but my olfacto-
rles or csophagus or larynx or throttle
valve or whatever you call it was out
OF order and | suppose | WAS snoring
pretty lively when l heal d voice cali
ing me: "William, William" Asleep
or awake that uxorian voice always
makes me jump with alacrity. has
tened over to her corner of the room
to see what was the matter and ran
against the center table and q chair
and waited for orders. Suddenly she
whispered 81 just wanted you to turn
over. Iou snore so loud you will wake
up the baby. Don't snore So"
With subducd feeling | started
back to my bed, but it was awful dark,
and ! couldn't find the round table that
was in the middle of the room. Slowly
and cautiously | felt my way, when
suddenly my nose collided with the
top OF the mantlepiecc. This guided
me to my little bed again and assum-
cd a tired and recumbent position ard
Illuminated on the battle Of life. But
mustn't snore was the order. The baby
mustn't be disturbed. This Injunction
weighed so heavily upon me that | was
afraid to fall into a deep sleep and OF
getting sonorous again, so | slumbered
along and dreamed | was travelling to
heaven or some haven of rest, and on
every barn and board fence and rocky
cllff there was a red letter sign like q
patent medicine sign and it said ::
"Don't Snore. Don't Snore Don't
Snore - and by and by we reached a
hlgh mountain and there was youth
climbing it with banner and thought
1T was the Excelsior chap we used to
SEQ IN the blue-backed spelling book,
but as the brceze unfurled the banner
| saw it was Don't Snore Don't
Snorc !" Just then | was awakened bv
gentle sonorous olfactory sound that
came from the other corncr of the
room and so | vcnturcd over there and
touched her tcndcrly and whispered !:
J "I'ont snorc. you'll wake the baby"
| This baby-raising business is about
! the biggest business know Of, and the
most responsible. ! was one out of ten
that my mother raised, and my wife
has raised ten, and we have raised ten,
ana it looks as If some Of our postcrity
| arc on the same ancestral line. But
there were no grandparents in our fam
iiE, ana VIC llLtic chapS hau TO rough it
ike Cain and Abel did. Nevada 70 it
| takes two parents and three or four
grandparents and several aunts and q
nurse and baby carriage to raise a
child, but that is all right if the child
Is blessed with such privileges.
The dear little things ought to have
good time in infancy, for trouble will
nurely come when they get older. and
rejoice that the modern children have
u better time than we did. romemhor
the little brown cradle that we we're
all rocked in, and when there wasn't u
baby carriage in the town. remem-
ber when the average child had no
nurse save its mother, and she did the
housework and made all the garments,
TOO, and didn't know she was having y
hard time. The little chaps didn't
huue thni, fnnnu .unnLal -. ~