New-York tribune., 1896-06-05
TILE RLCYCLE IT TI'NrR iIS.

Two puzzled subs rlbcrs recently sent letter ~
inquiry . Tho indianapolis Iournol' which iha'
excellent paper answers In a way that does crriI,
- i,s heal and heart The letter cam" from me
rre,,v r'ilc suburb - Phi'aAeluha about twenty
miles from Indianapolis AMI with that friendly
c,nnd.nre which ought T. beat In the hosoms %
all ilhsrrihers even when they are puzzled II
u-keI the Editor II n would be all right L. ride
bicycle ~ the funeral ~ n distant cpnncxl1n by
marriage. providing You keep h'hnl m" nurse"
In this question IL revealed the existence u a
n.w pnA ursuspert"l soca problem created by
the bicycle. with peculiar elements ot complex xity
about ~ ihni might we'll bafle the wisdom of oven
an editor The question Is not simply whether
mourners might property attend funeral on u
bicycle. Though hcdgcl about with difficulty
such "A question is susceptlhl" Of an answer by
adopting the simple catcgari al method As. FOR
instance the bicycle is a vehicle. II Is proper TO
attend a funeral riding In or on a vehicle: there
fore. etc or adopting another premse II - Inn
proper - attend funeral on a vehicle not drawn
by horses The bicycle IL such a vehicle There
fore etc II ls evident that great deal could be
said I'm support ~ either one ~ these premises,
and whichever side he espoused. an editor could
be re,s inahlv sure OF receiving the Endorsement
OF "Oll Subscriber" Constant Reader and per
hans even "VoX Populi."
But the question prrsenteA 10 The JournaF Is
not ~ this elementally simple character. II con-
talns involutionG calculated 10 make the stoutest
editorial heart feel like confessng its wcakn' ss.
The bicycle may or may not be tho proper vehicle
for the mournc-s at funeral; but however that
broad general principle may be decided. how shall
We decide the CAGE Of "A man who wants 10 ride n
bicycle a the funeral o' distant connextci. by
marriage" and who proposes t. keep behind the
hursc'? Even II the deceased were simply con
nextion" ~ any sort the problem would be hard
enough But distant connection by marriage"
seems almost 10 bring us face TO face with Intel
| lectual chaos. whore every attempt NJ rational
thought leads into a logical cul-de-sac Does de-
tance OF "connextion' In ITSELF. when effected by
marriage. modify any rule to the wheel that
may finally be adopted? Shall We say that n man
must not attend the funeral OF his brother on n
! bcvce. while he may do So II the funeral Is that
| Of his hrsf wlfr's second cousin? And then the
condition OF keeping behind the Nurse" adds to
our difficulty: for II forces us to contemplate the
whcelman as an essential part ~ the funeral cor
| t"gr. Should he do a lttle "scorching he might
| for the moment add an element of d,scorl 10 the
IA event, but he would soon cease TO be part OF
the funeral at all lie could pr coed at 10 the
grave and walt there for the last rites. But II he
| is u pedal slowly behind the Nurse" Of a dis
tant connection by marriage" what Judgment
| shall we pronounce concerning him? What IN
deed? He is an Enigma. with large t. and q
Problem. with large p surrounded by the
trcachcrOus chop seas OF logic to venture IN which
Is fraught with dangcr or. to change the figure
he IL a Burning Question az unquenchable IA tho
Man In the Iron Mask or the Author OF Junius.
II argue, great courage. therefore. on the pa ri
OF Thc Indianapolis Journo' that 1t seriously AZ
! tempts 10 answer rhe question propounded 10 H.
| In effect. ii says that people must be buried
whether their "connextion'' Is marital or san
guineous. And II the survivors can get to the spot
only on bicycles why. there you are. 1t says
nothing about the combination VI wheel and woe