davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-06-30
HUMoR OF THE HOUR.

81 wish / could have lived in the days
when men were brave enough to fight
duels for the smiles of women" said the
girl with the dreamy eyes.
But they couldn't set up the ice cream
soda in those days. for there wasn't any,
said the girl with the tilted nose; and
the dreamy girl concluded that perhaps
the modern times were best.-Cincinnati
Enquirer.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-06-30

Actor (as amateur hunter)-Tell me,
left?-Fliegende Batter.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-06-30

Mr.. Winls (solemnIy)-A noted physi.
elan says that deadly bacteria Turk ir
bank-notes, and many diseases, especially
smallpox. are spread that way.
Mrs. Winks-Mercy on usi Give me all
you have, right off. I've been vaccinated
you know. New York Weekly.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-06-30

81 once knew a man. said the i'm
aginative boarder, who was SO fat that
he was actually taller lying down than
when he was standing up. What do you
think of that?"
"It strikes me- said the Cheerful Idiot
'as pretty tall lying. indianapolis Jour-
nal.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-06-30

Miss De Pink will be so glad wher
George and l are married and he car
have a home of his own.
Friend-He boards now, l suppose.
Yes, and such time as he must have
Even their coffee can't be anything but
hot water and burnt peas, because he has
to chew real coffee half the time to make
up."-NeW York Weekly.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-06-30

Life is Short said the man speeding
before a prairie fire, and grass is long
Wichita Eagle.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1896-06-30

81 love you unspeakabiy, Molly"
But perhaps you might speak to nam
ma. "-Fliegende Biaetter.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
The Sharp Lord Tenterden.

The story Of Charles Abbot has been
often told-the scrubby little boy who,
failing to become i chOrister, ran after
his father through the streets of Canter-
bury carrying Il pewter basin, case of
razors and a bag of hair powder. The
unpretentious dwelling whence the pair
emerged was situated i'll narrow street
opposite the stately west portal of the
cathedral, and its owner, who shaved
for penny and cut hair for twopence,
boasted that he had thrice prepared his
grace the archbishop to deliver his trien-
NAL charge to the clergy of the diocese.
A good story is told of Lord Tenter-
den, as this disappointed little choir
boy became, having one day at his own
table asked county magistrate if he
would take venison. ''Thank you, my
lord, boiled chicken" was the reply.
His lor>lship had contracted an invet-
crate habit of keeping himself and every
body else to the precise matter i'll hand.
"That, sir, said the judge, "is no an
swer to my question. | now ask you
again if you will take venison, and l
will trouble you to say yes or no with
out further prevarlcation.
renterden was habitually down on
witnesses, and on one occasion told the
chairman of the East India company,
whom he had failed to recognize as he
entered the box, ito hold up his head
and speak out like man.. :" The ruling
passion is sometimes strong i'll death,
and just ''ere the %eary pulse of life at
last stood still" Lord Tenterden was
heard to murmur to himself:
And now, gentlemen of the jury, 1
leave you to consider of your verdict.
Temple Bar.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

Properly considered, beehive is a
wonderful shop, and each individual
insect is a curiosity. The inhabitants Of
Il hive are classcd as droncs, workers
and queens The queen is the mother
Of every insect in the hive unless she
has been installed instead of a queen
who had died and left the hive without
mistress. The queen bee is the wonder
Of the whole insect tribe as far rs egg
laying is concerned, often depositing
1000 eggs II day for days i'll succession
during the most productive season. The
chief wonder connected with the work
er bee IS the admirable manner i'll which
his body is shaped and fitted with i'll
strumcnts for honey gathering These
natural Instruments consist Of cups,
combs, brushes, knives, tunnels, scrap
ers etc. each Of which is worthy of a
week Of careful and painstaking study
under high grade microscope -Chica-
go Chronicle.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
Crops and weather Bulletin.

SCARBoRo.-The weather has been cool this
week, which has retarded vegetation some
what; more sunshine is needed. Corn plant
ing well advanced. Oats have come up well
and growing nicely. Wheat is making good
growth, but is very thin on the ground
ing hurt by the black ileas; large acreage
of tomatoes will be planted. Early potatoes
coming up. Thunder shower on the 5th.
VIM. J. Thompson
uAvRE DE GRACE.-Hcavy hailstorm on 18th
much damage done; temperature dropped i22
in fifteen minutes The hail fell in a strip
beginning at Havre de Grace and extending
westward about three miles; nearly all the
young tomato plants were destroyed, and
much Of the wheat. Some corn has been
planted. j. VIM. Mitchell
FLISTvILLE.-The weather of the past week
has been favorable for the growing crops and
for planting corn \ shower of rain fell on
Grass seems to he slow. Several days rain is
needed, as springs and small streams are get
ting low. e. r. Hamilton
VALE.-Fine growing weather. Wheat.
oats and grass doing well. Corn planting
about over; some corn ready 10 work
A. 5. Bay.
ALDINo.-COrn planting has commenced
here, but as some persons were little late
blowing, it will last for some time vet.
Weather very warm, and ground is very dry.
Wheat and grass improving every day.
{. w. Gibson.
FAvBIBBER.- Maximum temperature, go
on 10th and 18th insts., and lowest, 4lo on
the 18th inst, at which time there was a slight
frost, which did no damage. Crops general
~ looking well, but rain is needed, ground
being very dry. Tomato plants backward on
account of cool nights retarding growth
Wheat generally improved. Cora planting
progressing. Potato bugs numerous, but
garden truck continues to grow finely.
H. A. WrOth
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

The Election law, as passed by the
last Legislature, i'll one of its provi-
sions makes it necessary for every
voter to register anew, and unless the
necessary attention is paid to it by
those who have the good of the com
munity at heart and intend to assist
i'll the work of redemption in the State
there will be Il large number of voters
DISTINGUISHED. Apathy upon the part
of Democrats will unfailingly result i'm
losing the control of the county by
the party to which the majority of it's
citizens belong.
1t may seem to be early to call at
tention to this important measure. but
delay is proverbially dangerous and
nothing should be left undone to in
sure success. The initial steps in any
enterprise are often the indicators of
success or failure, and in so urgent a
matter as one which vitality affects the
suffrage of every voter in the county
precautionary measures should be
taken Immediately. Let the Demo
cratic clGbs throughout the county
and it is hoped that Que will be found
in organization in each precinct of the
couDty-attend to the matter thor
oughly. A close canvass of each
neighborhood is necessary, and in the
hands of competent persons can easily
be made Inattention and apathy with
other causes very considerbly lessened
the Democratic vote during the past
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
STRONG ON ECONOMY.
A Philadelphia Husband Dispenses With
the Services of a Carpenter.

the Services of Carpenter.
Ancwly married man, who had never
had much experience i'll doing small
jobs about the household, told several
Of his associates of his first attempt to
gain his wife's approval by doing FIJI
vor for her.
''You know am very fond of dogs. F"
said he "Wcll, purchased fine lit
tie fox terrier pup, and he was so full
of ginger that he chewed up everything
he could get at about the house and
nearly worried my wife's pet cat to
death. Then she suggested that 1 get a
carpenter to build a pen i'll the yard for
HIM. But l was strong on the economy
lay and resolved to build the pen my
self The first thing did was to order
II feet Of wire netting 1t was the kind
with holes i'll it about two inches in
diameter This cost me SO. When got
home, found had to have four posts,
each five feet long, and these cost me So
After 1 got the posts planted 1 had no
hammer and nails. These cost me So. 20.
Il worked hard at the job for several
evenings and finally completed it
Then called my wife to bring out the
pup, and also expected to receive her
congratulations. Triumphantly I placed
the dog inside the Enclosure and then
waited to have my wife bestow her
praise The pup walked around the in
closure and then deliberately climbed
up the coarse netting as easily rs if it
had been stepladdcr and fell on the
outside, and he's been at large ever
since ,n-Philadolnhin Record
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

ES~Seed Potatoes for Sale.-Great Divide.
Early Six Weeks Statesmen. s. L. Hanway,
High Point. Naln 2. Q feh2S
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
a GREAT SHOT.
But He Learned That Cold "Pisen" Had
Reat the Gun.

Beat the Gun.
II was on a California ranch i'll early
springtime John, the cook, aged about
II years, had offered to Stay several
thousands Of the myriads of blackbirds
which were swarning around the ranch
if Brown, the boss, would furnish pow
der and shot The birds We're SO nunter-
Gus that the wheat had to be covered as
soon as possible after sowing. If this
was not done, the ground would be
cleaned as free of the seed i'll very
short time as if it had never been seed
ed. Under these conditions Brown was
not slow i'll furnishing the necessary
ammunition.
The next morning after the breakfast
dishes were cleared up John made his
appearance III the field, armed with the
old muzzlo loading, double barrelcd
shotgun. After slowing away liberal
amount of ammunition i'll the old gun
he took deliberate aim at a place where
the blackbirds seemed to be most nu-
merous on the newly seeded ground.
With a tremendous report the old gun
belchcd forth its deadly charge. When
John recovered from the recoil and the
smoke had cleared up, he was surprised
and delighted at the havoc he had
caused in the swarm Of birds. Perhaps
40 or 30 lay dead on the ground, and
others dropped every few yards as the
birds few toward Il clump of trees about
$50 yards distant.
Loading the barrel which had been
discharged, John proceeded toward the
trees, intent On securing another shot,
but as he drew nearer he was surprised
to see the birds still dropping to the
ground. When within about 30yards CT
the trees, he stopped, undecided as to
whether he had better fire again or not,
for it seemed as though he must have
wounded all of the birds, so continuous
" were they falling. As the birds did
not seem to be alarmed by his presence,
he concluded to count the dead ones,
and find out how many he had killed
with one load. Cautiously making his
way under the trees, he commenced
counting, and the birds kept falling.
After counting about 200 dead birds,
and seeing that they were still falling,
he commenced to feel little suspi-
cious, and noticed that the birds were
acting in very unusual manner up i'll
the tree.
"Ha, ha, ha" yelled Brown, who
had been taking it all in at short dis
lance, unseen by John. Laughing until
he could scarcely walk, Brown approach
cd, ard John, who was sure something
was wrong, demanded an explanation.
well " said Brown, Il had just sown
about peck of poisoned wheat whel.
you came out, and the poison COM
menced taking effect just after you
fired. "
The boys all call him "Blackbird
John. Poorest and Stream.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
WORTH ITS FACE.

A correspondent is informed that a
$50 gold piece if melted up and re-
turned to the form OF bullion would be
worth SEQ. 1t would sell for that.
The inscription on gold coins is to
signify the purity of the metal and the
quantity. The word dollar when
applied to gold piece means simply
acertain weight of gold. That weight
of gold has value fixed by the usage
of the commercial world-not by any
governments law. The vice of the
proposed unlimited coinage of legal
tender silver dollars" at the ratio of
16 to is that it is an attempt TO
double the value of a certain weight
of silver-an attempt which is bound
to fail, with disastrous results to this
country 70 put 100 cents worth of
silver into the silver dollar would he
honest and not Immediately hurtful,
but to make 30 cents worth of silver
legal tender for 100 cents would he
both dishonest and ruinous.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

Posons engendered by food fern enting in a
dyspeptic stomach are the dire ct cause of
rheumatism, govt. bronchitis, liver and kidney
complaints, asthma, pneumonia and many
nervous ailments.
These results are prevented by the use of the
Shaker Digestive Cordial, IL RENE dy discovered
and prepared by the Shakers OF Mount Leba-
non, N. Y. 1t is in itself food and has power
to digest other food taken with it. Thus it rests
the diseased stomach and finally masters the
worst cases of dyspepsia. 1t acts promptly and
fresh strength aud increase OF weight soon fol-
low. The first dose, taken Immediately after
eating, ahatCs the pain and distress SO dreaded
by dyspeptics. Trial bottles-en"ugh to prove
its mCrit-1O cents.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
HON. nIIEEY SIOIE A LAIl-
1t Was a BOX Car, and He Coupled 1t TO
a WAY Freight.

This is the narrative of Dutiy's theft
Of Jail and the prisoners therein. Mr..
Duffy, from the core of the nations in
tcllyct, balloonist, manfish, tourist aud
orator, had found friend who had in
lul%gd him to the extent of the follow
ing items, towit: Three free drinks, one
supper one cigar. This story was his
PAYMENT therefor. He unbuttoned his
vest, for he had consumed Il large, thick
steak, two dishes of potatoes, two plates
of bread, two cups of coffee, three large,
heavy flannel cakes and IA glass of milk.
'"Thrue oratory an me gintlemanly
instincts often lead me into pleasant
fields an the company of conganial COM
panions," he began. 81 oncet commit
ted most shameful larceny i'll the state
of Indianny. was tourin with u friend
an we had jourmeyed as far rs Jay coun-
ty. Now, We can't tell me that the peo-
pie of county with such a name can
cope with set of brains from Boston.
We had reached the town of Portland.
Me friend committed the indiscretion
of Erccmin hungry an was arrested. L
brought me intillict to bear upon the
sitocation an kept well fed an free.
"N%w, Portland was the county safe,
an the Jail had recently been BURNED to
the ground. The sheriff therefore KEEP
his prisoners in box car down on the
railroad thrack, the same bein loaned
by Il conservative company, the which
didn't want the prisoners beatin their
way on its trains Me friend was dump
ed into this Jail. Me an me intillict
staid on the outside.
Il agitated me thinker all day an
by nightfall had planned the deliver
ance of me friend an his fellow incarcer-
ates At supper tonne the gyard went
away home, lcavin his lantern by the
trackside 1t was me intintion to prise
tho door off the car, an I was lookin
about fer prise whin 1 heard train
comm. Me intillict was equal to the
emergency l took the gyard's lantern
an tagged the train, which was of the
way freight species, the hardest of all
fer tourist to travel under.
The train stopped an the conductor
says kind of impedint like, What II
die shtop this train fer?'
Ne frien, says I, this car is bound
fer Titfin, O., an me instructions was to
shtop yez an hitch it ON to yer train.
He grumbled a good deal, but hitched
the car ON, me hangin to the brake
beam.
'It was along about O'Clock in the
mornin when we crossed the Ohio loine
an shtoppcd at station. Icrawled out,
broke open the jail door wild q couplin
pin an all me laddybucks come foorth,
free as the air. An that's how shtole
the Jail i'll Indianny. My, but I'm dryl"
Kansas City Star.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
Rich Discoveries of Gold

At Cripple Creek, Colo, and elsewhere, are
will he the largest ever known estimated ut
Two Hundred Million Dollars Cripple Creek
alone is producing over One Million Dollars n
month, and steadily increasing. Mining stock
are advancing in price more RAPIDLY than any
other Stocks, and many pay dividends of 20 to
30 per cent. They offer the best opportunity
!. T.. MOnGAE " Co, 40 Broadway, New
York, nre financial agents for the Prudential
Gold Mining Co, and others in the fumous
Cripple Creek district. They will send Won
free. interesting particulars of the Mining
Companies they represent also their book on
speculation in Stocks, Grain and Cotton, con
tHining many new and important features
Send for these books mt once if sou are inter
Cstcd i'll any form of speculation or invest
mcnts They may prove profitable TO you.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

| LOst-Bctween McCaun's Corner and
| Federal Hill, bundle containing Il Baby's
| White Silk Cap ANA some Huudk crchiefs.
-, | Finder please leave il mt This office
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
Proposals for County Coal.

Bids will he received 10y the County Commits
sOuers of Hartford County, at their Office in
Rel Air,up To q o'clock Mon Monday. May %,
1896. FOR 50 tons anthracite Goa! CLIO pounds
per tom - tons No. > and % tens No. 3.
% tons of No. , and five tons of No. to
be delivered mt the Baltimore aud Lehigh De-
Court House and Jail. The above coal to be
well screened. The Commissioners reserve the
right IL reject any or all bids.
BY order GEO. ]. FlENEY, Clerk.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
College Athletics.

Amy emphasis given to academic
gymnastics that goes beyond the point
Of Developing mans animalism for
any other purpose than to give the best
possible support to his enlargement as a
rational and moral possibility is per-
version Of the purpose Of humau disci-
pline, and to that degree blocks the
wheels of all proper college intention, :"
writes DR.. Parkhurst i'll The Ladies'
Home Journal. Nevertheless the real
animus Of the athletic tendency is a
wholesome augury of better breed of
men. :"
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

n.5s-F For Sale f.boor-I.ar,s ph.,.o, r.,
quire at Joseph E. Bateman's, Bel Air, ~
&t5~Just arrived and for sale one car load
of Virginia Horses and Mares suitable for all
purposes II. b. Bruins, Railroad Sales
Stables, Bel Air l5may2t
-
Young Oxen. " q Mccoy. Dublin. Smy2t
-
~ lnree re, fresh lows For Sale Norris II.
,gi..por ST. 1,.Eho--- ,,o,,.,o &c..
potato POM and n"'i'" Shr w.
!, o'1Toi ppP. In In ss i'au's' |aIie3 H.
gz,s-Lost -Rctwocr NrC.,,.,s C,rn.r .r,
FsdrrsI Hill huTIiie nnrtairir,r H,h NV
White SIX Cap and some Handkcrchiefs.
Finder please icave u ~ ms once.
1n5- Money to l.oam.-Or. Mortgage or Col
lateral Security. john :. hughes & Bro.
uesdays and FRIDAYS. 24ap
"
s., - - Horses CIppe1 oy fower Machine for
H. s. Flowers.
ePs-r,u ot R-fo,n,n,S V.-i, sfro.t por Air
fog your SrrI Potntnrs ,,,i (;ar,ien Sa"J ~
all descriptions. Try his 81 cent Guupowder
Tea and Oriole Coffee % cents pound.
D.i5~For Sale.-An ail-eteel Deering Self
Binding Platform Reaper, nearly new and in
complete order. For sale cheap or will ex-
--
Observation-Disclosures Pasture for Horses
and Cattle at 81 and $l.50 respectively if paid
Horses Separate from Cattle, HIS. McIlvain,
ChurcLyilie. l7ap
----
cents per hundred. Shad and other Fish at
reasonable prfces John p Leiobt I7.p
--
yzts- For Sale.-One-y ear-old Colt, by Manor
Boy. ID. Mason Lildt, Black Horse, Md.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

IRON racine Health JOurnalD
FIRST, get wife; second, he patient. You
may have great trials and pcrplcyities in your
business, but do not therefore. carry to your
nome cloudy or contracted brow Your wife
may have trials, which, though of less magui-
tudc, may he hard for her to bear A kind
word tender look, Will DO wonders in chasing
from her brow all clouds of uloom-To this
we you'd add always keep Il bottle of Cham
bcrlain's Cough Remedy in the house 1t is the
best and is sure To he needed sooner or later
Your wife will then know that you really care
Tor her and wish to protect her health. For
sale by druggists.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

two years and further indulgence
in them will again prove disastrous.
The voters of the Second Con
Congressional District can very easily
restore the district to her proper place
in the Democratic column, but it can
not he done if they permit themselves
to sleep over the matter Of registra-
ton. The terms and demands of the
law are rigorous but can be complied
with. Let the clubs rc"rganz" at
once and app oint special committees
to attend to this matter
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15

re-" For Sale Cheap-Lady's Pheton. En-
quire at Joseph f. Bateman's, Bel Air
ES~Just arrived and for sale one car load
of Virginia Horses and Mares suitable for all
purposes. II. b. Bruins, Railroad Sales
Stables, Bel Air l5may2t
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
IRRTyfTTNG MEDDLGNG.

1t is reported That Weyler, the
butcher, has c I'D the Spanish Gov
eminent tn ii = impossible for him
to procee IA the war as he should,
as the ;.i;norities at every moment
are hd.nuered by the Irritating med
ding of Americans i'll Cuban affairs"
Thi - the complimentary manner in
which II wretch, who deserves and
every human being, refers to the
righteous demand of our government
that the prisoners captured on the
Competitor shall not he butchered
without the sanction of that govern
ment, whose protectionthey claim. The
course pursued by Spain in her en-
dorsement of Weyler, is one which
merits the active method of interior
ence which the United States has
adopted. The extreme hatred of this
country exhibited in Spain, and which
the administration of that country is
rot able to subdue, is foStered and adj
vanced at every stage by Weyler, and
it would seem MS if the claim of Ampri-
can citizenship is equal to Il plea of
guilty to the charge OF treason, murder
and arson. Fortunately, we have an
administration which is able and dis
posed to protect its citizens and the
prisoners will not be executed until
formally proved guilty by a just and
tribunal.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1896-05-15
DEMOCRATIC PRIMARY MEETINGS &
COUNTY CONVENTION.
Presidential Campaign for 1896.

In accordance with the recommendation OF
the Democratic State Central Committee the
Democratic voters of Hartford County al. re-
qucsted to hold Primary Elections in the sew
eral districts thereof ON SATURDAY, May 30,
1896, at . o'clock p NJ.
In the First District, at Abingdon.
In the Second District, at Halls Roads.
In the Third District, ut Bel Air.
In the Fourth District, at Jurrettsville.
In the Fifth District at Dublin.
In the Sixth District, at Ilavre de Grace.
70 select ten delegates from each district tn
County Convention to be held in BEL AIR on
tuesday, June =, 1896, at IL O'Clock NJ, to
select five delegates to represent Hartford
County in the State Convention to he he'd IN
Baltimore ON cdncsday the 9th day June,
at noon. To select delegates to represent Mary
land in the National Democratic Convention 10
be held in Chicago on the 9Th day Of July, for
the nomination of candidate for President,
aud vice President and for the selection of
eight Electors TO be voted for in November
next.
THOS. II. ROBINSON,