Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1896-05-02
A MEAN REVENGE.


had rung the bell until | was
tired and out ci patience, and then
called for him until was out OF
breath, and still he did not come.
II YOU want to know who | am,
allow me TO inform YOU that my name
is George Boomerang better known in
Frazedona, where reside, as Captain
Boomerang, late of the army. am a
man of considerable wealth, own the
finest house in town and keep, or did
keep, man by the name Of Sam.
whose duty il was to brush nv clothes,
hat and boots and adjust my leg.
refer to wooden leg. The orig
iual leg ran against cannon ball
during our late unpleasantnes>. and |
have never seen it since.
Well, it was Sans duty to take
that wooden leg off at night and To be
on hand in the morning to put il on
before | got out of bed, and now You
know why was yelling, Sam. Sam
Sam !"
And when inform you that this
was the morning of my wedding day
perhaps YOU can imagine how anxious
| was to get on to my legs as soon as
possible.
"Ycs, ma am. was the lucky fellow
that had walked into the affections
on wooden leg too of the handsomest
girl in Frazelona and was that day to
lead her 10 the altar. But | must get
my leg on first, and. As Sam wouldn't
or couldn't come. rolled out Of bed
and went hopping around on one foot
to find my leg.
Now, my dear reader, when the sur
geon trimmed my stump after that
little affair with the cannon ball, he
sawed il off uncOmmonly short, So per.
haps YOU can family imagine my
feeling when, after hopping around
my room, found what | supposed to
be my leg, but, upon attempting TO
adjust il, discovered that it was in
tended to % on below the knee.
DO wooden legs shrink? That's
Just what want to know" said /.
And then rang the bell and called
SAM
Well, Samuel didn't come, but my
housekeeper, Mrs. Bloom, did.
Mrs. Bloom" | cried, where is
SAM
She answered me through the key
hole of the door, "He left the house
last night about | | o'clock. Took his
trunk with him, and said he was going
to leave town by the midnight train" p"
couldn't understand it ut first. |
had always used Sam well, paid him
good wages, and he had seemed per-
iectly ca. tented with his situation, and
served me faithfully until now.
Suddenly an idea struck me, and
the whole cause Of Sans perfidy was
revealed to me.
by heavens. it is Slvmpkins"
yelled. ''Slympkins is tie cause of all
my woe lie bribed Sam 10 steal my
leg on this my wedding day and leave
this insufficient prop in place OF it
Jim Slympkins is or was my rival.
He is the only son Of his father who,
by the way. is the most wealthy gentle
man in Frazedona. Consequently Jim
doesn't do anything but smoke cigars,
drive round town behind his splendid
grays, and devote himself to the ladies
generally.
rather had the advantage of Slymp-
kins. To be sure, Slympkins had OF
was expecting to have much more
wealth than | could boast of. but he
hadn', my face, you know, or anything
like it.
was sorry tor Slympkins, but,
hang it, my dear sir, what could | do
II he had chosen Miss Short, Mis-.
Ginx, Miss Broad, or, in fact, any one
but Miss Amelia Seymour. it would
have been we'll. But it was really
absurd for Slympkins to suppose that
| would allow him or any other man
to marry Amelia-at least while | had
a wooden leg
| would have given Slympkins any
thing in reason, but il was truly ridicu
lous tor him to think that | would
give him Amelia. told her so, and
then folded her to my breast, and
she folded me To her breast, and |
allowed her to sip the honey from my
ruby lips.
Yes, had won her. and poor Slymp
kins was fairly wild with rage III,
hal sworn to be revenged. but
laughed at his threats.
was seated at the breakfast table
slipping my coffee half an hour after
ward when Mrs. Bloom came running
in, crying:
"Oh. Captain, | know all about it"
What, the leg g
YES. think so My daughter
Eliza says she saw Mr.. Slympkins give
Sam some money last night"
"More than that Sam was mar
riei last night to Miss Seymour's maid
and they went oil together by the /:
o'clock train"
but, my dear woman, said !, 81