The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1896-05-30
Moses MossDack on "PolIytix,

Dear Mister Edditur:
thot Ide rite 700 fue lines tn let
700 no wuz enjoyin the blessins of
guide health, and hope yoo arr havin
the same blessin.
1 haiut very guide hand at writin
fer the noozpepper, bekase in my old
days hev bin sufferin nightly with
roomatix, su if I don't youse guide
dickshunnery, hope yoo'll exkuse me.
But no ez eleckshun IL cummin on,
and evvery buddy else be tawkin polly
tix, no yoo'll not site a old settler
like me to air my sentiments upon u
fue things whut no tn be facks.
Mister Edditur, line a gret admirer
of Jedgc Benit. 1 scene by yoor val
looble pepper ez how he wuz a runnin
fer Kongriss, and so l sed tn myself,
sez |, line goin out and holler fer Jedge
Benit, roomatiz er no roomatiz. Don't
700 no, kin rekoleckt the Jedge whin
he wuz nuthin but kid going aroun
barfuted. And betwene yoo and NEE,
Mister Edditur, he wuz the best feller
tu wurk on the farm that ever seed.
I rekolekt wunce whin l wantid sum
old stumps grubbed upp. fer tn youse
the ground fer plantin timuthy seede,
and mind 700, he wud wurk hard awl
day grubbin out stumps, and thin at
mite he wud set down by the fire place
and reede law Dukes fur hours at q
strech. Its fack. And I sot ther
whittlin on stick and lookin at
him, and sez to myself, lie bett 2
booshels of Irish pertaties that thet
yung chapp'll bee President sum day
Yessur, The Jedge wuz orful guide
farm hand; and in thrashing time 700
kin bett he wuz hard to bette. He wuz
the handiest feller aroun a stack Of
wheel on thrashin day that you ever
seed I tell 700, We wuz awl prowd ov
yung Benit thin days. He wuz the
faverit awl aroun our dlggins. Hee
wurked and studded orful hard. kin
awlso rekollekt whin he wuz teechin
skule in our deestrik. An 700 bett
the kids got hole lot of booke larnin
whyle the Jedge was teechin thin.
But now thin, thet very self same
individgual, whut yoused to be mie
trusty farm hand il runnin fer Kon-
griss. An tie uther day an old ac-
kwantance of mine what yused to be u
dimmykrat, but is now votin with
the popps, he Gums upp tn me, and
sez'ee, now Moses, 1 want yoo to kast
yoor vote fer Mister Kwinn think
thet's hiz name); bekase Jedge Benit
IL a lawyer, and wedon't want no more
lawyers back ther in Kongress; ther
the room Of our kintry. and TIERS 300
ou them ther now. We want some
farmer back ther, whut'll luke after
the farmers interest. So yoo vote fer |
Mister Kwinn. Sez I, You darn fule,
whut du 700 take me fur. lie bett yu
Jedge Benit nos more about farmin
now than half ov US farmers. Jedge
Benit he's the only farmer kandydate
runnin for Kongriss, an lie bett' yu
blA DllS dSOnoU w SCubS anu Adn uuttv
Mister Kwinn don't no beens about
farmin. He lives in Portland and
runns a nuzepepper and a laundry
waggun, and what duz he ne about
farming?" And my old friend, sez'ee,
wall yoo've got me now, Moses, and.he
wint off and newer wantid tu tawk
pollytix with me since thin.
Inn konklushun, Mister Editor. I'm
again to vote fer Jedge Benit, bekase
line a pore man, and the Jedge hez
allwus bin the very best frind ov the
pore man. Whinevver a man gifts
hurt on the ralerode, he goze to Jedge
Benlt, and Jedge he meks the railrode
kumpany pay the pore man damajes.
So want to see awl ov my old friends
joyn with NEE mkt Munday, lett us go
up to the ballot tugether, apd let's |
wun and awl say, Ez fer me, line agoin
to fite and vote fer Jedge Benit. Wish
in yu guide luck Ulster Edditur, l re-
name your old friend,
MOSES MoSSBACK.