The Hazel Green herald. [volume] (Hazel Green, Wolfe County, Ky.) 1885-19??, 1896-02-20
THE PROFESSORS EYE.
By W. I. ALpEN.

"There is one thing" said the colonel,
as we were walking along the Strand
one evening, sin which London is be-
hind the age, and that is in the matter
of electric lighting. Take my own
town of New Berlinopolisyille. 1T hasn't
more than $4,000 inhabitants, but there
isn't o gas lamp in the whole place, ex-
cepS in few houses. The streets and
most of the houses are lighted with
electricity, and / shouldn't be SUR
prised to find when + get home again
that our people were doing all their
cooking and housewarming by electric
heat. Why you Britishers still stick
TO gas MS you do is something that cam
not account for.
"Did ever tell you about old Prof
Kan Wagner and his electric inyen-
tions? Well, this looks like a respect
able barroom, and Ii you say so, well
stop III and have little something, and
III tell you about the professor. He
was one of our most remarkable men,
and though the general public doesn't
know it, he did more for the cause of
electricity than almost any man in
America, except Edison.
"About two years ago" began the
colonel rs he slipped his hot Scotch and
tried in vain TO tilt back on its inn
aginary hind legs the sofa on which he
was sitting, prof. Van Iyagener went
crazy, as most folk thought, on he sub
jcct Of electricity. Incandescent lamps
were his particular style OF lunacy, and
he made up his mind that he wouldn't
have any other sort of light in his house.
You see, his sight was beginning 70 get
a little dim, which made him dissats-
fed with gas, and then he had knocked
over his kerosene lamp -paraf1in, be-
lieve, you call it over here, though i
don't see what right you have to invent
new names for things we Americans.
have named-half a dozen times, and he
had come SO near to setting the house
on fire that he was anxious to get rid Of
kerosene altogether. Then, again, he
believed that electricity would be
good deal cheaper than gas, provided it
was properly managed. And I'm in
clined to think that he was right. Any
way, he told Mrs. Van Wagcner that he
was going to furnish the house with I'M
candescent lights, and that she might
sell her kerosene lamps and gas fixtures
for what they would bring.
snow this old professor was not only
an ingenious man, but he was prac-
teal man, which is something that a
professor very seldom is. He saw that
IL was all mistake to have iisiiis fixed
in one place, as gas burners are, or to
have them carried about by hand like
ordinary lamps or candles. 'Heripatet-
ic lamps are what we want, said he,
which, suppose, means lamps fastened
on the top of our heads. though l adj
init that / don't know any German TO
speak OF. So the professor, as soon as
he had taken the gas fixtures out OF the
front hall, fitted an incandescent light
ON the top of the head OF the house,
maid and supplied it from storage
battery that was concealed under the
girls back hair. When there was no
need for light in the front hall 1t was
left ia darkness. bat whenever anybody
rang at the front door the maid just
turned up her light and answered the
Lcll. She was rather pretty girl, and
she made fine effect with the lamp
glowing on the top of her head and
lighting up her face in way that
wotld have madelan ugly face prstty
hard TO bear. When she showed Wis
itors into tho Parlor she would walk
III front OF them, lighting the way, and
everybody declared that she WINS long
way superior to fine best Light that had
over been previously known.
.'Then Tile professor fitted a light in
tl.s inside OF HE silx hat and Cit opens
ings III Abe Int 10 let the light shine
Ehrpu2l, Ia 'front.' Of the hat was y