Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-05-14
THE CHURCH MILITANT.
BY BARRY PAIN.


AS I passed the vicarage, thought
that it looked likely place. walked
on a few yards, and then it seemed
to me pity not to see if the place was
as good as it looked. So, 4 went back
and asked at the back door if they could
give me q job of work.
The kitchenmaid said there was no
work for me, and she was not inclined
to talk. But she fetched me some bread
and cheese, and had chance to look
round. l marked the scullery window;
It was out of sight of the road, fas-
tened with the usual simple catch, with
no bars or shutters. A regular invita-
tion-a window like that is. 1t seemed
to me one-man jolt, and just as good
that night as any other night.
So that night, by half-past ten, I was
In the shrubbery Of the vicarage gar"
den, smoking my pipe and watching
the house. There was only one light;
itwas in the study W indows downstairs.
At IL o'clock that light went out and
another appeared in the upstairs will
dow. That's all right" said to my
self. Parsons finished writing his
sermon and gone up to bed" When the
whole house was dark, went round it
once or twice, just to see how things
lay. I couldn't find anything better
than the scullery window, but that was
quite good enough. I was impatient
70 begin, but did not consider it safe
to start work until half-past twelve.
The window gave me more trouble than
i had expected; the catch was very
stiff, and 1 had nothing but my pocket
knife to force it back with. However,
got it back at last and opened the vim
dow very slowly, an inch at time, max
ing no noise. Then got in.
no sooner got my feet down on the
scullery floor than was knocked head
long, and found 13-stone weight on
my chest. I asked it, speaking under
difficulties, to get off again. I was a
bit dazed, for I had come down hard
and bumped my head, but saw the
only thing to do was to sham drunk,
end spoke thickly. 1 undid one end
of my collar, pulled my hair over my
forehead, hung my lower lip, and put
on a bleary stare. By the time that
man had got off my chest, struck a
match on the heel of his boot, and lit the
candle behind him, looked a complete
drunk if ever any man did.
/ could see now that the man who
had knocked me over was Rev. Will
liam Lake himself. And the more 1
looked at him, the more felt sorry that
] had ever come.
"Well," he said, you dirty little
ginger-headed, two-penny half-penny
scoundrel, what are you doing here?"
1 hiccoughcd and answered.: Thor
thish was my housh-nummer twenty
Willetsh Terrish. Amt thish rip"
"rhat won't do" he said; 81 heard
you round the house an hour ago-or l
shouldn't have been here waiting for
YOU. Besides, drunken men don't
open windows that way. You're not
drunk. Drop it."
thought about it for moment, and
saw that there was good deal in what
he said. So I dropped it. I fastened
my collar again, sat up, and pulled OF
my cap.
Very WELL" said, then what's the
move now?"
1 suppose he saw my hand slipping
round, for he said, quickly: Have you
any weapons?"
''Bless you, no! I only"
Before 1 could finish he was sitting
on me again. tried smash at him
but he caught my wrist and nigh brol,
st. After that I didn't try again.
wasn't only that he was bigger, heavie
and stronger than most men; he wa
quick as light, and you could nevel
tell from his eye what he was going t,
do next. He went all over me CAREFUL,
and took my knife, and the shooter, an
my Jenny. Then saw that the gam
was up.
"What silly little liar you arcI" h
said.
AS l have said, l saw that it was a
mp, and l couldn't make it any wors,
was good deal disappointed, and
had been roughly handled, and alto
gether was not in the sweetest tempe
So / spoke out. said that did nc
want any adjective omitted) preacl
ing from a substantive omitted) lii,
himself. All / asked was what his (at
jective omitted) move was.
IF you swear any more" he said,
shall. be compelled to cause you consi,
cradle physical pain"
! had bumped head and barlSe
allow. i was fairly copped. aud n