Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1896-02-06

He vowed that his love would be change
less and true,
Surviving mans oft-shiftins humors;
Yet in spite of his protests she lost him;
he flew
On the day that he saw her in 'looneTs.
Washington Star.
Miss hlderly-Shc said she heard l
was engaged Iena-IIow nice Of her!
Truth.
Maude-Did you go to Clara's we'd
ding? Mabel-No: / never encourage
lotteries yonkers Statesman.
DO you let your wife have her own
way?' ''oh, yes: it's only When she
wants TO have mine that | object" y
Harper's Bazaar.
(Which do YOU prefer-fact Or fic-
tion:" "Oh, the former, by all means.
Fiction nowadays is much too matter
Of fact. Judge.
Miss Ethel wonder if the gentle
| man over there can hear me when l
sing? Maid-Of course he can: he is
closing his windows already.Ruch
Fur ALE.
Mrs Newed-Is your husband Il do
nestle man: Mrs. Henpeck-IIe's the
only domestic We keep. / have taught
him to cook and wash dishes very nice
ly.-PhilaleIphi Record.
1.-THE love of money is the root Of all
evil" quoted Mrs Lamb. 'No," re-
piled Mr.. Lamb who had been shorn
lately, wall street is the route of all
10 TN,,l
Cholly-laas. twied to play gclf last
summer, but | gave it up when | was
hit on the head and knocked silly.
Maud-Indeed, that's too bad, and can
the doctor do nothing for you?-Truth.
Mrs. ChatterboX-D you ever make
any errors in speech? Mrs. Words
WORTHLESS: ! made one few years
ago. Mrs. ChatterboN--What was it?
Mrs. WORDSWORTH said Eyes" Rich
mond State.
Helm afraid | couldn't make you
happy. darling, on $1,000 year. She
Oh, it's plenty. With economy ] can
dress on 81 800. and just think, dear,
we can have all the rest for household
eXpenses!-Life.
Small Brother Marie, does your adj
mirer stutter? Mare-No, of course
not! What made you think of such
thing? Small Brother-Then why does
he write MY dear. dear Marie?'--
Fliegende Blaetter.
FERGUSON don't like to see full
grown man like you carrying pair
Of skates along the streets down town.
Hankinson-Youd rather see me carry
ing them than having them on, wouldn't
you?-Chicago Tribune.
Lawyer-You say the prisoner stole
your watch. What distinguishing fea-
ture was there about the watch? Wit
ness-1t had my swectheart's picture
in it. Lawyer-Ah! / see. A woman in
the case. Scottish American.
Old Lady--Can you saw wood? Roll
ingstone Nomoss- Pardon me. madam,
but you are slightly at fault in your
lenses. If you mean, can | see wood,
| may say that my eyesght is slightly
Gefective.-P Philadelphia Record
Cashier-Have you heard, sir. that
Well, that's good news. Wen now re.
a littlc of what he owes US. whereas,
if he had remained in business. we'd
never have had cent--E'liegende
Blaetter.
First Young LawycrI don't see how
you happened to lose your case The
law was plainly on your side. Second
Young Lawyer Yes, I knew { was,
and that was what depended on. But
forget all about the iury.-Somerville
Journal.
THAT was a very fine speech You
made the other night" said one Pitts
burger to another. Il didn't make it
the other night" replied the other. Il
delivered it the other night, but it took
me a month 10 make it.'-Pittsburg
Chronicle-Telegraph
Lady "a widow)-Do you know my
daughter is quite smittcn with xo1l,
Herr Muller? Gentleman feeling flat
tered)-Really, now? Lady-A fact;
she was only saying to-day: I should
like that gentleman for my papa
Deutscher Soldatenhort.
Simmons-What is the matter with
you? You COX as il some one had
made YOU angry. Timmins--Solne one
has. | asked the editor of the Bugle
what he really thought of my poetry,
and he told me that if there were such
a place as the laureateship in This cour,-
try, ] would be sure to get It. -InLian-
apolis Journal.