Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1896-10-29
a TWo-HEADED ORATOR.
Col IngersOn Is Trying to Trump H
Own Ace.

Col IngersOn Il Trying TO Trump HIS
Own Ace.
Col. Robert G. IngersoH has frequently
told us that he is an agnostic, which is
another way OF saying that he does
not really know anything. Now he
wishes to persuade us that he knows
it all. For years he has tried to make
suffering humanity believe that there
was no such place as Jerusalem the
Golden. Now he turns his eyes toward
the gold vaults of Wall street and says
they are the earthly paradise. The
truth is that Col. Ipgersoll, having Ia
bored for years to rob humanity Of
its hope of eternal happiness hereafter.
is now trying to blight its prospects
of prosperity in this life. He made his
record in the latter matter when he de-
hvered in Chicago a diatribe against
the free coinage of silver and a paen
of praise for gold. Here is specimen
of his logic:
Now. 1t takes 81 ounces Of silver to be
worth an ounce of gold. But they pro-
pose by law to make 10 ounces of silver
the value of an ounce of gold. II they can
do that by law, what Is the use OF wasting
all that silver? If they can by law make
clause and make it one TO one? And If they
by fat can add IS cents worth Of law to
g cents worth Of silver and make II q
dollar, why not make all fiat and Use the
silver for forks and spoons?
Col. Ingersolfs agnosticism some
times inspires him to say original
things. His sudden advocacy Of the
gold cure for all human ills induced
him to utter sentiments quite as false
as his others and by no means SO strik-
ing. But the rampant repudiator OF
Heaven ought to remember that he has
spoken about free silver before. The
gallant colonel Is trying to trump his
own ace. Has he forgotten, or does he
simply not know his own mind? For
he bellies his own previous utterances.
Here is an extract from his lecture on
Farming" as published in pamphlet
form by G. S. Baldwin:
For my part, do not ask any interference
on the part Of the government, except &c
undo the wrong It has done. do not ask
that money be made out of nothing. dc
not ask for the prosperity born Of paper.
But do ask for the reconciliation of sill.
yer. Silver was demonetized by fraud
It was an imposition upon every solvent
man; g fraud upon every honest debtor In
the United States. 1t assassinRted labor.
It was done in the interest OF avarIce and
greed, and should be undo1e by honest
men. The farmers should vote for only
such men as are able and willing to guard
and advance the interests Of labor.
Will the admirable abolitionist of
eternal Joy be good enough now to tell
Us what made him climb over the fence
with SO much celebrity and jump down
on the other side so hard? We appeal
from Robert gold to. Robert silver.
There are no museums in this country
for two-headed orators or the colonel
might command an enormous salary.
Or is is possible that the eloquent spe-
cial pleader for soup as substitute
for salvation has looked upon the gold
when it was yellow in the bank, and
become intoxicated with dreams of
what may be his when the corruption
fund is placed where it will do the most
good?
1t must be confessed that in man
so old and weighty- as Col. IngersoIl
such spryness is remarkable. But if
he really believes his own peculiar re-
ligious doctrines it will be all the same
a hundred years hence. He will not
be receiving his due reward for telling
the truth to the farmers and a false
hood to the Chicagoans. But we beg
that he will collect himself; that he
will get himself together, as it were,
and give his fellow citizens some ac-
count of the marvellous intellectual
process which converted the author of
the strong, direct and honest words in
the lecture to the farmers into the |
shrieking visionary of free silver |
swindles," mobs, 1.-The dagger, the torch |
and the bomb.''-N. Y. Journal.