davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17
NO TELEPHONE IN HEAVEN.

"Now L can wait on baby. -" the smiling mer-
chant said,
AS he stopped ana softly toyed with the
golden, curly head.
al want oo' to tall up mamma - came the
answer full and free,
xvi yo' telephone, an asst he1 when she's
cumming back to me?
"Tell her rs so lonesome at l don't know
what to do,
An papa cries so much l dess he must be
lonesome, too.
Tell her to tum to baby, 'tause ut night 1 dit
so 'fraid,
wifi nobody here to tiss me, when the light
bedins to fade.
"AlI froo dc day l wants her, for my dolly's
dot so tored,
FINN the awful punehin' Buddy gave it Wit
his little sword;
An amt nobody TO fix 1t since mamma went
away,
An poor little lonesome dolly's ditttn' thin
ner ever day"
child" the merchant murmured, as he
stroked the anxious brow,
no telephone connection where
your mother lives at now"
"Atn't no telephone in heaven ?" and tears
sprang to her eyes.
81 fought dat God had ever'fng wifi Him up
in the skies"
dyTn.f. <r., st,,JSa
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17
A Diplomatic Boy.

1 have q little son 8 years old, says a
writer. He is smart and bright, and for
mischievousness l think can't be beaten.
| was sitting in a room one day reading
and smoking, when he came saunteriug
up to me with the forefinger of his Left
hand In his mouth. l thought at the
time that there was something wrong,
but said nothing with regard to the same.
PA" he said. after a while, 81 didn't
get one demerit in school today.
"You didn't, Willie ?" 1 i~nterrogated.
throwing a rather fierce look upon him.
"Well, Pm sure that's a good showing"
ayes, and | carried q bucket of coal 40
for Kate after school," he went on, stili
keeping that finger 10 his mouth.
why, you are getting very consider.
ate," l returned.
eyes, and brushed your coat all off
nice and clean"
"NO, Willie; you didn't do that ?"
asked, looking ~frowningly at him, for /
knew he had been mp to something.
eyes, did. pa, and lit the gas in mas
room for her,"
"Well. now"
"And shined your best shoes until
they glitter like Sister Elias looking
glass.
els thatso? What else have you doneP"
swell, l studied all my lessons in
school, got out at the regular time, said
yes sir to Uncle John, and helped the
hostler around the STABLE"
"Why, what is the matter with youP
Arc you going to get sick ?"
"No, sir" he replied. twisting around
a triie, shut Pm going to bs a better boy
at least for awhile"
"You are? Pm glad to hear that"
There was a short pause, and then he
said: "Here, pa, are two cigars for you.
l bought them with my own spending
money. IN buy you a boxful when 1 get
money enough"
At this ~juncture he placed both little
arms around my neck and sobbed aloud.
ooh, pa" he asked, do you like your
IibJl6 boy
"Why, of course l do,"I replied, get.
ting alarmed. care you HIP"
"No, but I've got something to tell
you. Would you keep POUR little Willie
from pain p"
"Certainly l would. Tell me what ia
the matter, my son ?'
GAN right, pa, l w~ill-dear, good, old
pa. This morning Billy Button, Tommy
Todd and myself were playing ball, and
| couldn't catch very we'll, so l went and
got your brand new stove pipe hat and
caught with that. Pa, that hat must be
made OF awful poor stuff, fox he frat fly
roof out. But never mind, In buy o
another One," olasping me tighter. ss /
essayed to rise, "and one gooder'n that.
tOo!'
What could l do ?-BOston Courier.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17
Miles Standish and John Alden

Capt. Miles Standish, the man not OF
words, but of actions, did not capture
the Puritan maiden Priscilla, but John
Alden did-after a while. The first wife
of Standish, Rose, had died Jan. "a,
1921, and after an unhappy, arms length
courtship the Captain married Barbara,
the younger sister of his dead wife.
When he made his will he left his
property to his widow and his four Sons.
Alexander, Miles, Joseph and Charles,
and to his daughter, Lora.
John Alden married Priscilla Mullins
and the next generation of the two
families intermarried; and from them and
the children who married otherwise have
descended a great army of American
people who are glad they are of Puritan
stock, and especially that they are of the
Standish and Alden strains. On the
Kennebec they have a family association
of Standishes as well as in Massachusetts,
and in New York.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

The pain that sometimes strikes a man
at the most inopportune moment is due
to indigestion. 1t may come in the midst
of a dinner and make the feast a mockery,
1t is a reminder that he may not eat what
he chooses, nor when he chooses, nor
when he thinks. He is a slave to the
weakness of his stomach. A mans health
and strength depend upon what he gets
out of his food. This depends on his
digestion. Remove the obstruction by
taking DIR. Pierce's Pleasant Pellets,
They are a positive cure for constipation
and its attendant ills-headaches, sour
stomach, f1atulenoe, dizziness, bilious
ness and heartburn" TIE "Pellets'
are very gentle in their action. They
simply assist nature. They give no violent
wrench to the system. They cause no
pain, nor gripping.
Send 81 cents 10 one-cent stamps to
Worlds Dispensary Medical Association,
Buffalo, N. Y, and receive DIR. Pierces'
1908 page "Common Sense Medical
Adviser" illustrated.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17
How Some Folks Pop.

A correspondent of the N. 2. Tribune
tells how the Republican candidate for
the Presidency and his wife joined their
forces. In the town where they resided
she was teacher of a large Bible Glass in
the First Presbyterian Church, and he
the Superintendent of the Sunday, school
of the First Methodist Episcopal Church.
In going to their respective schools they
passed each other at a certain corner and
found it pleasant to stop occasionally and
indulge in convers ation concerning their
work. This vent on for many months,
until on an ever-memora Bile Sunday after
noon in their history he said to her:
"I@don't like this separation every
Sunday, you going one way and I an
other. Let us change the order. Sup
pose after this we always 60 the same
way. l think that is the thing for as to
do. What do you think?
81 think 80, too" was the answer,
which gave to him one of the best of
wives, and to her one of the most de-
voted of husbands.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17
Heroic Men.

On the 9th of December, 1885, one of
the American line of steamers-the Lord
Gongh-while on its way from Liverpool
to Philadelphia, sighted a Gloucester
fishing schooner in distress. The wind
was blowing a gale, and the schooner
almost disabled, and with three or fonr OF
her crew already washed into the ocean,
was flying the signal for help. Captain
Hughes of the steamship perceived thu
peril which a rescuing party must encOun
ter, but his call for volunteers was
promptly answered by the mate ard a
crew of brave men, and preparations
were made for the desperate trip. To the
establishment of all, while the boat was
being lowered the flag of distress on the
%schooner's mast was hauled down.
Perplexed at this movement, the hardy
rescuers hesitated; but it was finally
decided that the boat should go. With
great difficulty the schooner was reached,
and on her deck were found twelve men
utterly without hope except from outside
aid. 1t was necessary to make two trips,
and the bold sailors of the Lord Cough
took half the suffering men, and returned
as soon as possible for the others.
When all were safe on the steamer,
Captain Hughes asked the schooner's
master-Captain George W. Pendleton-
why he had lowered the distress flag. The
reply was:
"We saw that you were preparing to
make an effort to save us; but We saw,
also, that it was a sea in which was very
doubtful whether a boat would live. |
said then to my men: Shall we let those
brave fellows risk their lives to save
oursP' and they answered, MOI Then
hauled down the flag"
The story is a noble one on both sides.
The men on the schooner were worth
saving at all hazards, and the men on
the steamer were worthy to save them.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17
Courage.

Have the courage to tell a man why
you will not lend him your money.
Have the courage to wear your old
garments till you can pay for new ones.
Have the courage to pass the bottle
without filling your glass.
Have the courage to speak your mind
when it is necessary that you should do
so, and to hold your tongue when it Is
better that you should be silent.
Have the courage to pay a debt while
you have the money in your pocket.
Have the courage to provide an enter
tainment for your friends within your
means, not beyond them.
Have the courage to W that you are
poor, if you are so.
Have the courage to obey your Maker,
al the risk of being ridicuied by man.
Four Good Words: - Punotuality,
Accuracy, Steadiness and Dispatch.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17
Longevity and Activity.

treat men usually carry their full
mental vigor and activity into old age.
nj. Chevreul, NJ. De Lssseps, Gladstone
and Bismarck are evidences Of this
anthropological fact. Plus TX, although
living in tempestuous times, reached a
great age in full possession of all his
faculties, and the dramatist Cebillion
composed his last dramatic piece at "a,
while Mich@l Angelo was still composing
his great canvases at SO and Titan at 90
SILL painted with all the vigor of his
earlier years. The Austrian General
Melas was still in the saddle and active at
W, and would have probably won Marengo
out for the inopportune arrival of Desaix.
The Venetian Doge Henry Dandola, born
at the beginning of the eleventh century,
who lost his eyesight when a young man
while on an embassy to Constantinople,
through the treaohery of the Greek
Emperor Manuel, was nevertheless
subsequently raised to the highest Office
In the Republic, managed successfully to
conduct various wars, and at the advanced
age of SO, in alliance with the French,
Desieged and captured Co~nstantinople.
Pontenelle was as gay spirited at 98 as in
MS 1ortleth year, and the philosopher
Newton worked away at his tasks at the
age of SO with the same ardor that
animated his physical prime. Cornaro
was as happy at 80 as at so, and in far
better health at the age of 95 than he had
enjoyed at 30. These cases all tend to
show the value and benefits to be derived
from an actively cultivated brain In
making a long life one of comfort and of
usefulness to its owner. The brain and
spirits need never grow old, even If IL
bodies will insist on getting riokety and
IN falling by the wayside, but an abstem-
GUS life will even drag that old body
along to ~centenarian limits in a tolerable
state of preservation and usefulness.
Inc, foregoing list can be heightened out
with an indefinite number of names, but
1t ls su ficiently loug to show what good
spirits and active brain will do to Tighten
up the weight of old age. When VIC
contemplate the Doge Dandolo at SO
animating his troops from the deck of
his galley, and the brave old blind King
OF Bohemia falling in the thickest of the
fray at Crecy, it would seem as if there
was no excuse for either physical, mental
or moral decrepitude short Of the age of
four SCORE and ten. National Popular
| Repiew.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

Mrs. Rhode Noah, of this place, was
taken in the night with cramping pains
and the next day diarrh@a set in. She
took half a bottle of blackberry cordial
but got no relief. She then sent to me
to see if l had anything that would help
her. | sent her a bottle of Chamberlain's
Collie, Cholera and Diarrh@a Remedy and
.be first dose relieved her. Another of
u neighbors had been sick for aboat a
week and had tried different remedies for
iiarrh9a but kept getting worse. | sent
him this same remedy. Only four doses
Of it we're required to cure him. He says
he owes his recovery to this wonderful
remedy Mrs. Mary Sibley, Sidney,
Michs For sale by Geo. M. Andrews,
Druggist.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17
NIAGARA FALLS.
Low Rate Excursions via
VRnla RaIIrOau

Low Rate Excursions via
Van1a Railroad.
No matter how vivid the Imagination,
It would be hard to give any adequate
description of Niagara Falls. 1t is one
OF the grandest and most awe.i inspiring
examples of Natures wonderful works,
One must see the falls to fully appreciate
their grandeur.
The Pennsylvania Railroad Company's
ten-day excursions present the most
advantageous method of witnessing this
wonderful sight; the rates are low. and
the accommodations first class in every
particular.
The excursions will leave PHILADELPHIA,
Baltimore and Washington on july 90.
August 9 and 20. and September s and
II. An experienced tourist agent and
ohaperon accompany each excursion.
Excursion tickets, good for return pas.
sage on any regular train, exclusive of
limited express trains, within ten days,
will be sold at $40 from Philadelphia,
Baltimore, and Washington, and at
proportionate rates from other points. A
stopOver will be allowed at Watkins and
Rochester in either direction and at
Buffalo returning.
A special train of Pullman parlor cars
and day coaches will be run with each
excursion. :.
For further information apply to
nearest ticket agent, or address Tourist
Agent, Room All, Broad Street Station,
Philadelphia.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

AFFIDAvITs as tt personal character
may be necessary to allay suspicion or to
attract the simple-minded; but what has
the manufactures private character to do
with the efficacy of his so called ''cure?''
Ely's Cream Balm depends solely upon
its reputation of years as a successful
cure for catarrh in all its stages. 1t is
absolutely free from mercury or any othe.
drug injurious to the system. Being
applied directly to the diseased membrane
it affords instantaneous reliefand will
effect q perfect cure for catarrh.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

After meals you should have simply a
feeling of comfort and salts faction. You
should not feel any special indications
that digestion is going on. If you do,
you have indigestion, which mean not
digestion. This may be the beginning
of so many dangerous diseases, that it is
best to take it in hand at once and treat
it with Shaker Digestive Cordial. For
you know that indigestion makes poison,
which causes pain and sickness. And
that Shaker Digestive Cordial helps
digestion and cures indigestion. Shaker
Digestive Cordial does this by providing
the digestive materials in which the sick
stomach is wanting. 1t also tones up and
strengthens the digestive organs and
makes them perfectly healthy. This is
the rationale of its method OF cure, as the
doctors would say.
Sold by druggists, price 10 cents to 81
per bottle.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

Last summer one of our grand children
was sick with a severe bowel trouble. Our
DOCTORS remedies had failed, then we
tried Chamberlain's Colo, Cholera and
Disrrh@a Remedy, which gave very
speedy relief. We regard 1t as the best
medicine ever put on the market for
bowel complaints. Mrs. E. G. Gregory.
Frederickstown. Mo. This certainly IL
the best medicine ever put on the market
for d~ysentery, summer complaint, colo
and cholera infantam in children. Il
never fails to give prompt relief when
used IN reasonable time and the plain
printed directions are followed. Many
mothers have expressed their %sincsre
gratitude for the cures 1t has tB c ed,
For sale by Geo. N. Andrews, Druggist,
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

And then go ahead. II your blood is
impure, your appetite failing, your nerves
weak, you may be sure that Hoods Sarsa-
parilla is what you need. Then take no
substitute. Insist upon Hoods and only
Hoods. This is the medicine which has
the largest sales ip the world. Hoods
Sarsaparilla is the One True Blood Puri.
fer.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

Dandruff forms when the glands OF the
skin are weakened, and If neglected,
badness is sure to follow. Halls Hair
Remover is the best preventive.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

He who t links he can do without
others is mistaken, but ha who thinks
Others cannot do without him Is more
mistaken still.
The Monitor-register., 1896-07-17

The very best way to know
whether Dobbins' Electric Soap is
as good as it is said to be, is to
TRY IT YOURSELF. 1t can't deceive
YOU. Only be careful not to get
an imitation. There are a great
many Electrics and Magnetics, all
intended to deceive the public into
supposing that they are Dobbins'
Electric, or just as good. We
have made this since 1860. 1t is
the original Electric, and is guar
anteed to be worth four times as
much as any other soap ever made.
For washing anything, from the
finest lace to the heaviest blanket,
it is without a peer. Only follow
directions.
all that we say on the
REAO two wrappers around the
CAREFULLY yours a''U whether 'ahe Se or NOT it
you can afford to ever
use any other soap than this, after having heard
its W story. told you by your own test of it.
DOBBINS SOAP MFG CO.,
Successors to l. L. Cragin & Co.,
PHILADELPHIA, PA.
aanf % lv
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-11-22

M the forward tire. flat and flabby. Inc
detail is of no consequence, under the CIR
cumstances. but. nevertheless, l saw that
had run over horse shoe t'4a' ii'lo
baen covered by dust. A nail had uohe
the business. Thoroughly frightened HO"'
there is no other word for it. tore open
the tool kit. There was the famiilar DlacA
parcel containing gum, pliers, Plugs e'o'
If ever there was occasion for emergency
renair. this was one. With needle
crowded some rubber bands into the pune
tire and smeared the spot with soiu-
ton" There was no stopping to inject
the stuff. Then l clapped the lalscs.
match" in the parcel upon the surface Oh
the fire so that it covered the puncture'
and cut off the plug, that, in a case Oh
slow repair would have been torcee
through the hole Another application OF
solution" Next. I bound my handker-
chief around the tire as tightly as l could
draw it. OF course, there was httie ar
nurnn I'm the kit. and the next task was 10
initiate the tire. I don't dare say now
long this took, but it could not have been
many seconds. The repair seemed TO hold,
and flung the tools back into the Kit ana
remounted As l did so. ! hearu tne
pounding of horses hoofs in the forest De-
hind me.
A glance backward showed the leaders
of the party emerging from the darkness
They were about as far away as the torest
ahead. toward which I pedaled win an
speed. There we're no shots after me TINS
time. Again I dashed into comparative
darkness. the forward wheel twisted IN
an unseen rut, and over the handie-oar l
went. full length upon the ground. a
wild. rafting yell made known that my
sDiu had been seen by the pursuers win
visions Of nothing more pleasant than the
scalping knife, I got up and ran to a tree
set nv back against it, and with drawn re-
volver awaited the attack determined
TO make as good a fight for it as d man
could.
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-11-22

what were you doing with that ma
chine2'
Riding it," 7 answered. with unwise
bravado.
The spokesman and the others looked me
over critically They were plainly dis
pleased with my answer.
IT amt ben decided by Judge Lynch.
remarked the spokesman deliberately.
whether stealing a wheel is the same as
stealth a horse, but in my opinion it's on
the same level. I psume YOU ketch my
drift
Il do, and as soon as I saw that you were
white men. I understood the matter. I've
been riding stolen property. Naturally.
you suppose that I stole IT, If 1 hadn't
thought that YOU were Apaches or Greas-
ers. when I first saw you. / would have
stopped at once"
It's my machine. I'm satisfied o. that"
came voice from the lesser group about
the bicycle. What does the thief say for
hinseif?' and the speaker came up 10 Us.
To my unbounded amazement. Z recos-
nized him as Roger yelling. those pno-
tograph had at that moment in ny pock-
et. Here was situation had rot looked
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-11-22

voluntarily to the left, as l heard
sDatl at my right. and saw tiny fur
row in the dirt there.
Now, if it should be supposed that
at this juncture | was calm, und!sturD-
ed, confident. / wish to confess frankly
that I am not exactly that kind OF
man. l shall not write myself Gown
a coward. for. if [ understand that Gre
ature, ! am not to be classed with him.
7 mention it merely to suggest now dlt-
ferent was this emergency, as compar-
er with any had ever before confront
ed. | was outnumbered by at least
ten to one: was in an unfamiliar Wild
ness: ny pursuers were evidently out
for business in the tragic frontier
sense. and the best I could hope for, in
the event OF capture. that they might
be Greasers rather than Apaches. l
was by no means certain whether there
was any choice between them, for that
shot was like a sentence Of death; and,
i'm a moment OF peril, man is not over
finical as to the precise method OF his
taking Of
So. / expect not to be charged with
disgraceful behavior, when | admit that
1 felt alarmed. and that / scorched over
that level strip as never scorched be-
fore. There were few scattered trees
and clumps of bushes between me and
the forest, and it was yet light enough
to see them clearly. As l sped past the
first of them, there flashed upon my
memory a great deal that l had read
about the Apaches methods Of warfare.
l recalled their extraordinary feetness
OF foot. their unequal physical endur-
ance. their sava- cunning, and their
relentless pertinacity. What if this
hand in the roar should be but pOr-
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-11-22

but \ few rods away That meant curve
and sharp one. had been riding with
one hand only on the handle-bar, but no"
I rep,aced the revolver in my hip pocket
e~asped both handles, swung my feet up
to the coasters. and bent far forward sun
irving vainlv TO distinguish possible OBJ
stacles in the way. / can imagine noun
ing like that mad plunge IN the black lu-
ture. Men do not deliberately jump from
a nrecipice into dark abyss OF unknown
depth. unless they invite and expect dea'h'
was doing much that sort Of thing TO
avoid death. but 1 cannot say that my eN-
nectations were brighter than the forest
gloom. / had great confidence in the roaa'
for thus far it had been remarkably well
made and. of course. it must lead TO
something more comfortable than a blank
wall of nit Of mire; but at this speed
spill would probably be fatal. I could not
tell but that a tree might have taIlen
across the way, just around this curve
and [ experienced q vague WoEcer as 10
whether the wheels might not ny 10
Dieces from the action OF centrifugal force
after the maximum velocity had been at
tanned.
Well. around that curve went and the
whir Of the wheels became a loud buzz
Through wind-made tears ! saw that there
was another curve not far ahead. and the
grade was now so steep that it was per-
ceptihle to the eyes. Just then must have
crossed a SPOT that had been washed by
the overflow Of a brook. ] can attribute
the sudden and extreme roughness to no
other cause. The vibration Of the handle
b-r had been trying before; now it caused
a ouiverinr ache from the palms to the
shoulder blades. Again following my des-
nor. te trust to the conditions I let go the
Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1896-11-22

AT last. around q sharp and sleeper
curve than any. I few from the forest
b.sckness in-o-amazcment,-th light Of
day, How long had 7 been in desc ending
that interminahle hin? I could now Judge
somewhat concerning the terrific speed az
which 7 was going. for could distinguish
scattered trees' and bushes. But the
Nsht? IL seemed brighter than it was back
there ar the topaz effect produced IN
dout-edly by the di,alon Of the pupils in
the gloom o. the woodland for an instant
could rot realize that my nirht had been
measured iu minutes rather than in hours.
was Oh level. and speeding yet al fear
ful speed from the momentum acquired in
the descen- il was even more trying 70
the nerves. now that I could see how the
land dashed mcdiy from under me. but
this was for q few seconds only. The buzz
z.ng q the wheels subsidized TO O. gentle
vhi- and. with another forest confront
inS re q quarter az q --.ie distant. I got
my feet on the pedals. No sooner had I
begun 10 urorel the machine again than it
seemed MS Sc my heart broke; for I heard
fateful snap, followed by % nasty hiss
ing that procla imed q puncture.
effected d G--0g dismount and glanced