Eagle River Democrat. [volume] (Eagle River, Vilas County, Wis.) 1893-1896, 1896-05-18
Al sings SUBJUGAT|ON.

HI SING'S SUBJUGhIION.
A woman may be mistress of her
self though china fall, up to a certain
limit, beyond which no conception Of
heroism reaches The model woman
screams at spider, and discusses the
merits of wired sleeves serenely while a
priceless vase goes crashing to the floor.
Such is the standard of feminine cour-
| age, the foot-rule by which woman
may be measured. Yet when not one
piece of china, but two pieces, and three,
i and four, fall, the standard becomes use
less A woman is not expected to bear
more.
Yet more came There was a fifth
crash in the kitchen. Mrs. Melville
stopped in the midst of telling Richie
of the Sixth-that anchovy paste was to
| be struck off the cOmmissary list; she
stopped and looked appealingly at Mel
| VILE
"Austin, can'tyo do something's"
Austin gathered up his napkin, put his
hand on the table and started to push
back his chair; then he sank down again
/ and restored his napkin to it's place on
| his knee.
IF I go in there and he gets imperti-
nent, I'll break his head-which would
| be bad for his head, and, incidentally, for
my official neck.
''But it's head or china
! SWell, there is plenty more china-and
when that gives out, the quartermaster
has new invoice of tinware."
| But seriously, Austin, there won't
| be a thing left for the general to eat
off of. What are we going to do about
| it?'
81 think the epidemic is over There
has not been dish broken that | know
| of in five minutes. You must be reason
able and make due allowances for him,
| Matty. It's hot out there. It's hot here,
too. It's hotter than blazes everywhere"
Il think, my dear, you are bordering
on profanity. Of course it's hot. Within
the memory Of the Oldest inha bitant, It
| has never been even cool in Arizona III
July. You really can't expect the in
| spector-general to bring ice. Mr.. Richie,
| don't you think he ought to do some
| thing?"
II must respectfully decline to enter
into family difference. You and Mel
| vile must settle the question between
/ yourselves. Only let me suggest that it
! it comes to the actual breaking of heads
! I'd take it out on Sing, and not on one
another
''There Austin,' fairly screamed Mrs.
Melville, jumping up, there goes anoth-
er; and yet you sit and laugh. Oh, how
| horrid you can be!'
"Sit down, Matty, and talk sense. Sup
pose | should go out there and attempt
| to reason with Sing. In the natural Sc
| quence of events it would come to pass
| that in his present humor he would be
| so ugly that / should feel obliged, as
| said, to break his head. Apart from the
| distant consequences of that act, you can
hot hn hn fU
bad. You'd have to wash the breakfast
dishes, and do the housework, and also
| cook and serve the generals dinner.
Therefore, the inadvisability of my re
| ducing Sings head to splinters is obvi-
Gus. isn't it?'
II suppose so; but do wish to good
ness Mrs. Lawrence's cook hadn't got
married.
$50 does she-the cook, mean-since
| O'Halleran came home drunk two nights
ago, and thrashed her. He has been in
| the guardhouse ever since. and I'm out
good man. Shows what marriage does
Before he was married he didn't beat
his wife However, it wouldn't have
made the slightest difference whether she
| had committed matrimony or not; the
| Lawrences would never have had the
! general nor even single member of the
| staff to dinner. She's never dined the
| paymaster, you know"
L Uuluk II 3 LOO Udu IL uTSC llouCCuduC >
| wife has to do it, and all the rest of the
entertaining for the post
"You are also the adjutant's wife, re-
| member
Eyes, of course. [ wonder what's the
matter with Sing, anyway?
That's Obvious guests, =
| observed Richie, stroking and curling his
unduly military mustachios. the mus
| tachios that have entwined and ensnared
| SO many hearts in their silken meshes
| since then, in the whirl of Washington
society. Richie was Melville's second
| lieutenant at that time. and as he was
| not married, and didn't like the bachelor
| mess, he messed with his senior and
| that young officers wife.
''Why, didn't his cousin die, theD?"
perhaps he realizes that the dead
cousins funeral is a little worn as a
method of obtaining leave"
II should think so; one died when the
| paymaster was coming to dinner the
| time before last, and another when the
| off two in anticipation of the paymas-
| ter's last trip
Chats not all, AUSTIN pursued Mrs.
Melville. Generally he only slams
when he has lost at faro the night be-
| fore"
In pursuance of his method of war
| fare, Sing precipitated a chopping bowl
and knife to the floor, with a resulting
noise that only the falling of those two
| homely utensils could possibly accom-
! plish. Melville bit his upper lip and
clenched his fist.
| II wonder if it would do any good for
me to go out and speak to him quierly?'
suggested his wife.
''Suppose you try it. If he takes a
carving knife to you, call out and we'll
come to your rescue; but unless it's an
actual carving knife don't get us mixed
up in any domestic brawl.'
Mrs. Melville patted her lace-and-rib-
bon breakfast cap down securely, took
long breath, arose, walked resolutely
| to the kitchen door, opened it, passed
through, and closed it behind her
| Melville and Richie listened. Melville