Middlebury register. (Middlebury, Vt.) 1886-1937, 1896-11-06
PLAYING MONKEY.

alluS right, l Know Clucrent Y, IL
only III other day Mlry-my missis-
wor dead wrong. "Now, yer will be
carful, wort ycr, Jim? says she, a. tyin
big red comforter round tn young
ms neck "Carcful?" says |. Il be-
lievc yor, me hov!' as Mr. Paul Bedford
used ter say ter Nh Fob Kelley. Lord !
Lord Wut days they did ave i'll them
tines
Yer see, my old mother 'ad been err
great trick act rider, til she al II hac-
cident, an after that as fer back as
Nine. Celcstc's day she got inter tn
wardrobe at tn Adelphy an event
On'-cne or 9TH guests, " yer know.
Lord, she wOr allus as jolly an as gen
lie as sand boy an used ter tell US
kids all about before she was married.
Eeein madame playin tn Indian girl all
afterward dancin tn gayot in wife
satin. An w 'en she come ono from tn
thcater she'd ave 'er little drop err cold
gin an sing to us wee uns (a-sittin up
N bed a-catin tn 'ot baked taters she d
bring rs) "Down Hamcng th' Green
Bushes in 'er sweet voice. Miss Fitz-
gerald did sing it that beautiful, " says
she, a-wipin 'er heyes.
'Ow did l cum ter be in tn purfesh?
Well, yer see, | was brought up bit
sensitive an with 'or taste fer tn dra-
mer, an bein rather tender hearted like
-takin after father, who got killed one
night a-carryin out old blind woman
from fire--I thought I'd like ter be a
acrobat or IA pantomimist. So one
Christmas gifts on at Covent Garden as
supo an ad ter do er little dizziness"
with Ia clown. An Mr. Payne q says
ter me, says e, "W'y don't yer go i'll
fer it," An does-goes prentis, an in
me spare time did little odd jobs an
'elped mother wot l could with tn
kids. But, yer see, l was bit old fer a
reg lar bender. Besides, I'd got it OH
me mind ter play a monkey. Mother
said as 'ow she couldn't account fer it,
'cept it wor she went one Monday to
tn geological gardens afore l was born.
Dad didn't want er ter go in tn mon
key 'ouse; but, womanlike. she would
Wen | was IS, l could play a monkey
fer all e was worth. l got engaged with
a troop, an they Civ me a good screw
well, good fer them days. It's differ
provinces. Then manager over from
America see US, an we played through tn
States. Wen we gifts back ter Lon
don, fixes up mother i'll 'er chambers
shop jest behind Hashley's. Lord, she
could nearly smell tn sawdust an quite
ear tn 'osses, an it did 'er good.
makes me young agin," says she.
Then cur troop gifts er turn at tn
Halhamhra An wot d. yer think? l
falls in love with my missis-Mary Ma
son-a good little gal in tn back row
O. tn ballet Well, we gifts married five
year ago come termOrrer, an we as two
kids-both boys. Tn second one was
sickiy an died. But, bless your cart
Tommy, tn oldest, jest a-risin 4-well,
there, talk about a munk! Wy, e on'y
wanted CT tail Wen e wor , year. e
'ung an chung on ter everything an
nearly frightened is mother inter fits.
Well, I've al i'm with me in my act
fer about three months. Another glass?
l don mind if do. Talkin's dry work
More soda, please. An last week l gifts
leave from my boss ter play fer tn
ben O old pal O mine down tn
east end way. Now, that night Mary
seemed ter reg lar 'ugger mugger over
Tommy. wv OTIS tn matter, mother?"
says l. "Oh, nuthin-I-I dunno, Jim, "
says tn mother. An | could "a swore
she was goin ter cry Then she broke
out quite fiercelike. Don't let that
there Bob Bracy ave nothin to do with
IN ropes, says she. Bob was tn 'ead
carpenter at tn all we was due at an
old sweetheart of Mary s--she "chuck-
ed" i'm fer me. IVY, Bobs all right,
mother ~ says l. Il dunno, says she.
Il shouldn't like ter trust Tommy with
i'm, saws she. Yer know q allus
swore he'd git even. Well, after a
minute; cts time yer was gone. Lord
love 'iml' says she, a-giyin tn young
un a extra kiss All another turn o. tn
comforter
Wen We gifts ter tn all. it was
pretty lata-crammed with people an
full Of smoke. Tommy seemed a bit
sleepy, but perks up wen I puts is
monkey dress On i'm. lows tn little
man." say. l. "All right, dadda, " says
e. l gives i'm to woman ter odd
while 7 goes on tn stage ter see tn
tackle was all right Specially a little
trapeZc tf Tommy = covered with leaves
an flowers, winch was fixed center o.
III stage way up in tn flies. There
was Ms-tcr Bob, as busy as any bee.
But ed bin ayin drop, l could see.
"Well, jimmy, ole man, says e, an
grins at me like 'ipperpotamus or a
lena or Cheshur cat Bob hain't no
beauty 'ow's tin missis?" shes
all right, - says l. "There amt no flies
on 'er" says |. "Yere lucky un,
yer are, says e. MARY ought ter "a
bin my missis, says 'e. Mrs. Jobson,
if er please, says l, IAN not Mary 4"
"Well, yo're getting damn pertickler, "