davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Irish standard., 1896-05-23


worth ii the great sinstit ntion founded b
lfffdInfaes Af,nn, ana u uhioh all Ameri-
lsssrs, irrespective sotf on creed, Justly
iilssI deep nterssts and a ational pride
Is,,stholic child attead parochial
schools solely for The sseason that they
are,ins addition IS tue regular education,
ENABLED rs receive instvuc tion IN their
Itensts ofssrel gion which IS considered Of
Ivital import ance M Catholic parents.
It would be difficult to hnd q child 10
years ot age ia our e5, 900 900 who does
NOT know Of Abraham Lincoln or George
shington; but the third, at least,
on the list OF the builders Of the
American republic IS not known to
millions OF intelligent penp.s. Wash
Eington and Lincoln represent the highest
types OF herodsm, patriotism and wisdom
In great crises of.republic building; Hor-
ace Mann, the quiet inner building, the
soul development Of the nation.
The hero Of the common schools was
born May A, 1886, in the little town Of
franklin Mass. His early life is Of the
type Of the life OF thousands OF boys IN
New England who, BY their honesty ot
purpose, enterprise and nntiagging en-
ergy, have done so much f for 70, this coun-
try. Born on a poor farm, where hard
work was the Prime necessity Of living,
he knew what tie struggle for existence
With the barren SOIL -, from ING .ill's ~
could handle a.fl noe or rlae norse 70 Prov.
Hard WORK was nis scnooa'has'et' .neie
was very tsSs.0 - =, S.r1>fA
1a a1,l g. $, .. s
born 10 s,1is saisl ..ie oloss - tne
tsesVlut'o 10 : :. :,
= I.ssl s9 a go. r ,,.,,
W. :. 800 W = = VI, .e' $3.50 49,
- - 6 { {, -. :. =. -
~ ~ ~ :. 49, 80 : -
- {. - :. " - 80. 49, -, -
=, -. 49,, = \.
Thasa ~, ~ sn,a,n,, 40, 80 - y. tho,,oh.
;..ar - ~ $500 :, h - thasa aa,,s
i ,,as tha;, = Al - ..e,at snnw,ed %
=, o,n,a.,aa l. nn,,,sr i. Ths reana -
.now,adra rara evceadin CIV - e,a per
rIo,aoa ,,;za,, !, ~ ,aoras+ ;, ~, !
=. 49,, $50 ,uha,a - hod hit
~. -. 1850 !. ;, no,,n. - ~ 1r,n-
~ -. 800, xsho h.d ~ a,,a,, ~ :
$3.50 49, "thraa DC /" R,,t tho insnirat,on
,,,.s thera ,,,rrinv q his aou, and
,,o,,nd .tha o,d aren,aca Nv the. ,,abt az
~ a,rinv nina knots ha studded hia
49, J "a h,,aetic ,,,s frs+ ,aaaons q ora ~ :
49, III
rh,,s 90 r,v = liza no recoenazad the
-, la ~ rnoy,a.1ga and raasized how diff
The Irish standard., 1896-05-23

It cost $1,0oo,Oo0,oo0 to bury the late
shah of Persia, Nasr Ed Din. How deep
did they plant him?
The Irish standard., 1896-05-23
B, THE PUBLI.,Il &: liz q I!

ma 4ttot y
,ssar of HUI fzng 81 4
csscl,ool
"a
The Irish standard., 1896-05-23

One popularity about McKlnley's Sc
,ence is that in the east they consider 1t
golden and in the west silvery. .,s
The Irish standard., 1896-05-23

The Memorial Day exercises by the pu-
pih sof Whittier school are to be held in
Calvary Baptist church. ct least 1t Is 50
announced, but there ere q number Of
Catholics whose children attend this school
Who object strongly against holding the ex-
ercises Of Memorial Day Ia the ediice in
which the notorious Rev. 0ba.ghtly Nor
I'll hurled his vile epithets At his Catholic
FELLOW citizens and Ii which he was upheld
b his congregation Catholics have no
|ob1sction to meeting With their Protestant
brethren as q rule, but they should draw
|thes line on Calvary Baptist church and a
m others d That stripe n this city.
The Irish standard., 1896-05-23
SEPARATIONS.
D1scoNr1NUANcEs.'

'.rhe Irish Standard will be sent to
every subscriber until ordered stoppeu
and all arrearages are paid up. Tne Only
legal method Of stopping Q paper Is Dy
paying up all back dues. .-$ H..
@ CHANGE OF ADDRESS.
When q change Of address, IL desired.
the: subscriber should give both the olo
and the new address.
LETTERS AND CONGRATULATIONS.
Address ell business letters and com
munications to 1.-THE Irish standard
minneapolis. Mimi. @ @ !.
The Irish standard., 1896-05-23

Il is said that the governments OF
Spain and the United States have arrived
ait an anicable understanding regarding
ths men captured on the ship Competi-
tor. The prisoners will be tried again
lin i civil court, under the provisions OF
the existing treaties. II this arrangement
III carried out, the discharge Of the par
ties must eventually follow; for there is
provision Of the American Constitution
which says that no citizen shall be more
than once placed in jeapordy Of his life
and liberty, on any single charge. What
We would not allow to our own courts OF
law, We cannot very well concede to
those OF another nation.
The Irish standard., 1896-05-23

Montana, in its state convention In
dorsed for silver, of course.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
Dogs Remarkable Instinct.

A remarkable illustration of a dogs
intelligence has occurred in Sutton. A
married lady there has small pet, and
on her removal to London hospital,
owing to i'll health, the animal became
greatly distressed, running hither and
thither in search of his mistress, to
whom he was greatly attached. A
week afterward the dog disappeared,
end two days later returned to it's
home footsore and weary. 1t subse-
quently transpired that the faithful ter
rier had found its way to the hospital
where his mistress lay. No one guided
him, and he travelled the whole way
alone. He waited about for hours, try
ing to gain admission, and finally, after
many rebuffs, succeeded in running into
the hospital and finding the bed where
the lady lay. With great delight he
hailed Aer, and after satisfying himself
that she was safe he trotted buck to
Sutton, about ii miles distant.-Lcndon
Daily News.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
D. ~ =.
ChapDed Iins.

Of the many minor ills to which the
small child is subjected in cold weather
there is none much more disagreeable
than the chapped lips which so often
torment him. And when the "chap"
becomes deep crack in the middle
of the lip it is even more trying. Then
cold cream or vaseline often fails to
produce any effect, and the split grows
broader until the lower lip looks as if
It were cut in half. The one quick and
efficient remedy for this is tiny phial
of flexible collodion and camels-hair
brush. The mother must hold the two
sides of the lip together with one hand,
while with the other she dips the brush
in the collodion and quickly paints over
the crack with the liquid. II dries al,
most instantly. and in drying forms '.
skin over the wound, Whenever this
skin breaks it must be renewed. Tire
small child who does rot vince and to
whose eyes the tears do not come under
this treatment must be heroic indeed,
for the first application Of the collodion
sinarts keenly for just a moment. But
in two or three days the treatment will
have entirely cured the offending mem
ber,-Harper's Bazaar. ia t....... ..... ..
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
FOR YOUNG PEOPLE.
TOMS SCHOOL BOOKS.


One night not long since. as went to the
A garment of Toms In its place to deposit.
/ heard such q queer noise upon one Of the
shelves,
Where his schoolbooks all stood in a row
by themselves,
That paused at the door, as in was walk
ing.
And found. to my wonder. the schoolbooks
were talking.
Said one. with sigh: IT am sure you re-
member
How nicely ! looked year since in Sep,
But now" 1t shrieked out. In the widest
Of RACES. Il FM
AS It flung back its cover, "just look at
my pages! AM 8 kNMa
And how he could do II is really mystery,
Maltreating like this "a United States His
" tory"
Then book by her side bowed low. as to
And said 7 can sympathize; am Toms
I'm nearly ,sa worn out. and he never trans
without saying roundly he perfectly hates
me-
And wishes that Caesar had saved him the
trouble
By writing in English. I'm nearly bent
double To-
BY the tortures he gives me, the thump-
ings, the thwacks,
And by being slapped down upon little
boys backs.
I could not discern the year through one
good omen, ia GHN E
And now I despair" said the noble old
III Roman. A kss I"
Then said the Arithmetic. speaking quite
grim: @
MY interest isn't of interest to him.
He pays no regard to my Weights and my
Measures, W 81 &8H#
My Cubes and Square-roots, and the rest
of my treasures.
And myself and my comrade in arms, this
q good Slate, ,sh&sf4t -RNH EsG.l
II we chose, We, too, could a sad story
relate" F--r FNg ~
Then the Reader. the Grammar, and all.
testified 81 ran .
In the very same way. Twas a blow to
my pride, yRf4 ~.
For Tom is my boy; but as soon as twas
I woke him, and told him this tale for a
II warning,
And he promised at once, when he heard of
~ their pain,
That he never would treat them so rudely
80 again.
Miss e. A. Hunter, in Golden Days.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
TOO LITTLE OF THIS JOHNSON.
Such Agreeable Things Do Not Happen
In Real Life.

Such Agreeable Things Do Not Happen
In Real Life,
This is about a man who put up a
stove. N
1t is unnecessary, perhaps, to go fur
Their with it. You know in advance just
how he swore and tore and spoiled the
carpet, and the pipe didn't fit, and he
skinned his knuckles and cut his finger
and spilled SCOT down the back of his
neck, and finally went uptown and got
six men to finish the job. sal ~ 2@lnist
johnson" said Johnson's wife at din
ner the other day, 81 want you to come
home early this afternoon. Iwant that
sitting-room stove up and going by
Sunday" # afr IS aaG =
Cali right, my DEAR" said johnson.
'I'll be home at four" i nd list
So that afternoon Johnson's wife sent
the children over to visit on the other
side Of town and stuffed rags in all the
cracks to deaden sound. After fer
vent prayer that all the neighbors
would be out of town for few hours
that afternoon she was ready for John
son.
He arrived promptly. fsis ,stFss =,
"The stove Is out in the woodshed,"
said she. ~ 'raasas .a.s 81 a.l1e.
The stove was not very large, and,
after johnson had dressed himself for
the occasion,with the help of Mrs. John
son, who had taken care to have his old
clothes and gloves handy, he got the
stove to the porch without much diff
Guilty. ..a. aaa. "u.an a..fwrru bhs
TT must be blackened," said Mrs.
johnson, as she mixed up the black
ing. 1t blackened to beautiful finish
with very little rubbing, and Johnson
whistled at his work. 90; -, g..
Then he tackled down the oilcloth
mat and the zinc and kept on whistling.
He took the stove in carefully and put
1t In the right place. - 2ag
There was plenty of the old stovepipe,
and while he cleaned it In the alley
with a stick Mrs. johnson sat on the
back porch and listened to him whistle.
The first joint went on all right and
the damper staid in place. The next
joint fitted so well that johnson almost
stopped whistling in sheer admiration
for it, and so did the next one. The ell
bow fitted admirably and the collar and
last joint fitted like a top. The seam
was on the right side all the way up
There was not even a speck of SCOT on
the papers Mrs. Johnson had spread on
the carpet. &c.. .'J.a
In ten minutes more johnson had a
lovely fire in the stove and was in his
business suit again, spick and span,
reading the paper while his, wife got
supper. .....l -. ~
1t was just here that there was a
savage nudge in Johnson's left ribs, and
he heard his wife tell him to wake up
and hustle out now, for it had been day
light for half an hour.-Topel1a State
Journal. ,''.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
BElL-RINGING COLLIE.
How an Intelligent English Dog Attracts
Attention to Himself.

How an Intelligent English Dog Attracts
Attention to Himself.
AS believe that dogs very rarely I'M
derstand the use of mechanical con-
trivances, and that my young half-brcd
collie certainly does the use of bells,
hope you will admit notice of him
among your records of intelligent dogs.
have long, old fashioned bell-ropes in
my dining room, and when he was
six months old he noticed that when
the bell was rung n door communicate
ing by a long passage with the kitchen
was opened, and he could escape into
the kitchen for romp with the serv-
ants and another dog who mostly lives
there, so he took to ringing for himself
when tired of the dining-rCom, and still
continues to do so, though he is now
over two years old. His way is, having
made sure the bell has really sounded,
to go and listen at the door to hear if
the kitchen door opens at the other end
of the passage; if it does not after
waiting about as long as anyone else
would, he rings again, and again listens.
Once he pulled the bell rope down, and
" NC III IllC IOoul Wucu no
wished to ring and discovered his loss.
He looked much discounted; he then
stood and thought for a minute or two;
suddenly his countenance cleared up;
he had remembered there was another
bell-pull the other side of the fireplace,
so he dived under the sofa and chairs
and pulled that. Now, where he stood
thinking he could not sec the second
bell rope, and it is very seldom used, so
it must have been memory that helped
him. There are two other doors in the
room, but he simply barks or whines to
be let out of them, unless he is alone in
the room, when he will ring for the
servants whichever way he wants to go.
The dining-room IL the last of three
rooms en- suite, and.a short time ago the
dog was in the further one with Wis
itor who was too idle to let him out
when he asked to go; so, much to my
friends amusement, he walked deliber-
ately through into the dining-room and
rang the bell there. He cannot manage
the newer bell-handles ia the other
rooms.-Cor. London Spectator.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26


child made to read them as they were
pointed to.
1 shall tell this just as it happened.
The first to be questioned was stout
little fellow, the brightest in the class.
''Hans," said 1, you may read the NUM-
beers as I point to them on the board"
So 1 began to point and Hans began to
read, which was something like as fol-
lows: won, dow, dree, YOUR, wife, xix,
zeeven, ocht, MEN, den." THAT was
well done, Hans" said I. 'Now You
may read them backward ~, b.. .s
NThe little fellows face darkened for
an instant, then suddenly frightened
as the idea how to read them backward
came to him. He first turned his back
to the board and tried to read them by
looking over his shoulder, but failing in
this, he bent forward until his hands
touched the floor and looked from be-
tween his legs at the numbers back of
him on the board.
I will not attempt to describe the up
roar among the rest of the scholars, nor
did at the time attempt to quell it, for
anyone who would not laugh at that
long-headed little German boy as he
placed himself in such a ridiculous posi-
ton to read the numbers backward, is
lacking one of the characteristics OF
genuine humanity.-Jennie 3. Hogan,
in Chicago Times-Herald.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
AFTER THE BLOOMING.

oh, little rosebud with petals red.
AS you nod by the garden wall
And dewdrops drink,
DO you ever think
That some day your petals will fall7
Some day your fragrance will all be gone.
Your sweetness a thing OF the pastf
For It matters not how
Much priced you are now,
Little rosebuds cannot always last.
And, oh, little maiden, with eyes so blue,
AS you sing, and laugh, and are gay.
Does 1t come to you
That some day, too, gh .t .sa
Your roses will pass away?
But the little rosebud mods on by the wall.
Caressed by the winds SO free;
And the blue-eyed girl .e
Swings In the mad whirl
Unheeding the song and me. -
oh, wise little rosebud and wise little girl.
Why turn to the dark ere you must?
Nod on and laugh on H
TIL your pleasures are gone. HE
Live to-day! For the morrow-trust!
--Johnstone Murray. In Womankind.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
HUMOROUS.

-"Er man dat am allus lookins fob
trouble" said Uncle Eben, ''ain' likely
ter git disp'inted, no matter how near
sighted he s."-Washington Star.
Out of Practice.-She-''Wh don't
you talk to me as if you loved me?"
He (absent-minded)- Pm so horribly
out of practice!"-Detroit Free Press.
z --Employer-"You say you would
like to go to your grandmother's funer-
al this afternoon, james," james
"Yes, sir, If 1t doesn't rain. Tit Bits.
-"Oi saay, Moike." "Yis?" "Phot's
dthis worrud? C-o-n-con-v-e-r-v
-s-a-sa, -t-i-o-n ~ shun l. CONVERSE
ton. Pilots conversation? ''Oi don't
think Dim shure, Dinnis, but Oh t'inls
dthot's dude fer gab.'-Harper's Bazaar.
Fl would be mighty willin' to
work." Mr.. Dismal Dawson explained,
IF I was only able" "You look able
bodied enough" said the sharp-nosed
lady; what is there to prevent you
worldng?" me pride. Indianapolis
Journal. ii. .......s -,
! Mrs. Grimble Ito her offspring)-
lucIS youi ~, tIdcflllS IuC hooi eili
over with mud. Didn't tell you to
wipe your feet before you came imp
,Johnny-"Oh, nobody's blaming you,
ma; you did all you could" Boston
Transcript. q .Isgs a5g g.. sg.nr 4.,,7i
Little Lord Charles-"Oh, I'm go7
ing to be IN omnibus conductor when
I grow up" Fair American-"Bu your
brothers going. to be duke, isn't he ?"
Little Lord aCharles-"Ah, yes; but
that's about all he's fit for, you know"
Punch. uusl Aw tugar goo, ,a1sag.
lone View of It.---"Say, what is this
social settlement idea2" Its like this
you're good fellow, you know
"Yes." well, you go and live in tough
neighborhood and you'll seem darn
sight better than yon really are!"--Chi-
cago Record. ao3ea4nuro &ff g. aauEas
I'll was very much disappointed to-
day." said Mrs. Northside, when her
husband came home from the office.
What about?'- cit was a fine after
noon, and 1 thought I'd return Mrs.
Tawk's call" r"Andy she was out, was
she? That was too bad."' "No; she
was n."-Pittsburgh Chronicle-Tele-
ryraph |ar,. .f.E.... '..Ir .s.... r,- ....r...r,
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
INDIAN GIRLS LETTER.
A Fair Sample of Picture Writing Which
Was Very Popular Once.

n
Was Very Popular Once. (,
When boys and girls nowadays have
anything to say to their friends who
are far away, they sit down and write
a letter in plain English, French or
German, as the case may be; but be-
fore you are able to write you have
to learn how to make some 26 letters
and how to combine them into words,
so as to tell your friends what you are
thinking about-this Is called sound
writing.
There is another kind of writing
picture writing, it is called-in which
there Is no alphabet, and instead OF
words some picture of the object is
used, as for example, instead OF the
word cat we would have drawing
Of the animal.
This kind of writing was used by all
people in the early days of the world,
and in most countries it is so old that
it has long been forgotten, but here
in America the Indians have practiced
this old art until very recently.
The following letter, written by an
Indian girl to friend whom she wishes
to visit her, will give very good idea
Of this kind of writing, which it is like
ly our own ancestors used thousands
of years ago.
The straight lines running through
the picture represent the paths of the
locality public highways or streets
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
THE LETTER

you may call them if you like. On the
right are shown three small lakes or
ponds. ~. = a..gH ,Erfl Ir.t
The rudely-drawn bear in the upper
'left-hand corner is the signature of the
writer, her coat-of-arms, 80 to speak,
and indicates that she is member Of
the Bear family. . srG8 r tDs 81
The figure of mullet below stands
for the person addressed-a man of the
Mullet family.
The three crosses are the girl and two
friends-crosses because they are
Christians.
The two triangles indicate the wig
vans and the figure in the one is the
Indian sign for hand and tells the
visitor at which wigwam he is to call.
In little more elegant English the
invitation would read: Miss Bear in
yites Mr.. Mullet to meet her two Chris
tan friends-at second lodge from the
road beyond the lake.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
THE RETIRED BURGLAR.
sorrowful Resulss That Followed Eating
During Business Hours 1870

Sorrowful Resulss That Followed Eating
During Business Hours.
81 always made it rule" said the
retired burglar, never to eat during
business hours. You couldn't always
tell i'll the dark just what you were
going to get, and then it always seemed
like sort of an unprofessional thing
TO do; you can't always tell just what
you are going to meet nor when you are
going to meet him; and anything that
tended to prolong a mans stay in a
house longer than was necessary to do
the work with a reasonable degree OF
comfort would be just downright fool
ishness.
still, 1 am bound to admit that did
sometimes break over this rule. re-
member snug little house that went
into once where I found on the side
board, when I swung my lamp around
preliminary to opening the drawers,
pie. 1t was a good-looking pie, fresh
baked, with the glisten of the oven
still on the top of it; it was cold night,
I'd walked quite distance, and 1 was
hungry; and everything about the
house seemed so peaceful and quiet
that it seemed as though might take
bite out of that pie without doing
any harm. 1 got knife out of one
of the drawers and cut it it was mince;
and, hungry as was, it tasted very
good. I guess I must have eaten half
of it. Then 1 went ahead attending to
business, and got away all right with
out any trouble whatever. "a a,.,,,. y
"But next day was miserable; dull.
and loggy and miserable; and L kept
that way for a week, and didn't DO a bit
of work. OF course, / laid it to the pie.
1t looked like a pie such as mother
used to make, but am satisfied now
that it was made by one of mothers
daughters, newly married, and testing
her skill at cooking for the first time
for the benefit of her husband.
81 got the husbands watch, but ]
have always felt that he never be-
grudged me that, because I took half
his pie."-N. Y. Sun.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
Erect. som,,ewbat sIm,Iar.

Hello, Swiggles!fl L congratulate
you, old boy, on your appointment 20
that consulship. It's a good position,
and you deserve it, s1- r. .. tu
Thanks, Ruggles. I'm sorry to see
you're not looking well this morning
Been sick?" ~. ...
mo. / was out on toot last night
That's ALL" ..,a
'Well, good-by! I've got an engage.
ment."
$50 have I. So long!"
Ten minutes later they happened to
meet at hatter's where they had gone
to have their hats stretched.-Ch Chicago
Tribune.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
READ THEM BACKWARD.

How q German Boy Interpreted His
q Teachers Instructions.
1t was country school. The chill
dren were all of German descent and
attended with that regularity which
characterizes their nationality, and as
usual were all present on this
particular day. Reading and num-
bers came first on the pro-
gramme. Reading was gone through
without anything unusual occur.
ring, and the numbers then taken up. A
drill on reading them from one to ten
was the lesson assigned, so they were
written on the blackboard, and each
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1896-03-26
Dean Hole Liked This Verse.

4 In his book, "a Little Tour in Amer
ica," Dean Hole, of Rochester, England
quotes with JUNCTION many specimens
of what he regards as typical Ameri'
can humor. When he was in Cincin-
natl, the thing that most impressed him
was the following bit of doggerel.
which he heard recited in that city.
Little Willie from his mirror
49, Sucked the mercury all off,
Thinking, in his childish error,
1t would cure his whooping cough.
At the funeral Willie's mother
Smartly said to Mrs. Brown:
s"'Twns a chilly day for William,
When the mt rcury went down."