davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

John r. Gould. Esq, has returned
from fishing trip to the Moosehead
Lake regions ard on the west branch
of the Penobscot j. Manchester
Haynes and i. Stone are on a hunting
trip in that vicinity.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01
Chicago Produce Market.

Chicago Sept. 50.
FLOUR-Very firm.
WHEAT-No 2 spring, G6lsMG64: No.
red, d7aam71
CORN-No. 2. 214022A.
OATS-No. 2. 171sM17A
RYF-No. 2, So.
BARLEY-No. 2. "a.
FI4AXSEED--No. !, UM1S.
PORK-S6MS $685.
LARD-S3. 15M$3S0.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Arthur Cross was arrested, yesterday
afternoon, on complaint of his wife, for
drunkenness. Last evening, Mrs Cross
called to see her husband at the police
station and while there had violent
it required considerab bic effort to calm
her She finally recovered.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Imperial Lodge Degree of Honor
4 q. U. W., will hold sociable, FIJI
aay evening of this week. Refresh
ments will be served. Let all members
try and be present.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

The alewive fishery. in Knox and Lin
ner season in amount of fish handled.
says the Waldoboro News. The total
catch has been $500 barrels, and the num-
her sold for domestic purposes far ex-
due to the fact that the price was re-
duced from SO cents to 30 cents per hum
dred. Newcastle. Nobleboro and Warren
are the three banner towns in alewive in
dustry. The net receipts to the two first
named towns are $25o5.i0. while Warren
cleared about $1,000.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

AT a meeting of Calanthe Lodge. X
OF p. last evening, five applications
for membership were received. Next
Wednesday evening, Grand Chancellor
Parsons of Kennebunk will visit the
lodge and the first rank will be worked
on four candidates.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01
Receivers Notice.

Having been appointed receiver of the
Marden Car Brake Company, a corpora
tion duly established by law and having
its. place of business at Saco. Maine, by
order of the Supreme Judicial Court. /
shall sell at public auction at the office
of Spear. 4 Whitney. Gardiner. Maine.
on Saturday, the Sd day Of October. 1895.
of the United States for car brakes. Wig;
No. 263052, dated August q, 1882
No. 270962 dated Jan. 49, 1889
No. 37479S dated Dec. Is. 1887
Which said letters patent were issued
to one Adds Fl. Marden, and by him duly
assigned 10 the Marden Car Brake Com
pany of SacO, Maine. the present owner
of the same. 5
Also certain open account against the
Sterliiigworth Railway Supply Company
Of New York. n. y, belonging to said
to the sum of 1852 A..
A. NJ. SPEAR. Receiver.
sept24,
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01
Foot Ball. Saturday.

The Cony and Waterville High school
foot ball teams will play at the Driving
park at 3 O'Clock. Saturday afternoon
A good game Is promised.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

ANY lady desiring a fine garment VIII
~ we'll ia call on Buckley & Goodrich,
this forenoon, as a representative Oh y
large New York house will be at their
store. this forenoon.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

n. j. Doherty of the Augusta ball
team arrived, last evening, from Bel
and will leave for his home at New
Haven, CT, today. The other members
of the party will also break camp, to-
6ay
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01
Summers Hot and Dry
Weather is gone,

And soon the cold damp weather OF
fall and winter, the weather tnit
causes more or less sickness, Will pc
at hand. Sudden colds will be nu-
merors. and every person should pc
nrepared for any necessity that
might arise by keeping in the mouse
some of the standard anu rei,"o'
remedies, generally recosiiizeu q
safe and effective. IA full ana cois'-
plete line of which we keep eo"-
stantly OH hand.
We maintain personal SUPERVISE.
of our prescription department
is well stocked with pure drugs ..
all times, and physicians may oe
certain of having their PRESCRIPTIONS
carefully and scientifically com
pounded.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

u Mrs. w. J. Davidson of New YORK
and Mrs C. A. Cunningham of Halifax,
n s. are visiting C. H. Cunningham
on Sewall street
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Charles Nichols OF Orono was III .iie
civ. hunting up old acquaintance,
Yesterday. Mr. Nichols was formerly
clerk for f. G. Kinsman.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

On account of the rain the funeral OF
the late John w. Rowe was postponed,
.,as.erdav afternoon. The funeral will
be held at the residence, NO " state
street. at 2. p. NJ. today.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

.,T,was too bad about that man
.atting shots, said a local joker yes
terday. 'Wna' az sou
/. man bought pound at the store
.,,;s warming. He got shot. see?
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

THROUGH TRAINS.
-, GOING WEST-c.3o A. NJ. for Lewiston.
mington Rangeley. RockIand. Port,
l lT Bridgton. Boston and Montreal: 10. q,
t,iDaliy) A. NJ. for Brunswick, Lewiston
: farmlngton. Phillips, Rangeiey. Rock,
iand Portland and Boston, Montreal. To
ronto and Quebec; 3.05 and $50 r. Nj. (ex-
press Tor brunswick, Bath, Lewiston
Iortiand. Boston: HOO p. NJ might pull.
man, every night for Lewiston. Bath
a and Boston; 15O A. NJ. Portland
GOING EAsT-1.5O A. NJ. might ex-
P tsa Ior Skowhegan. Belfast. Bangor.
par Dar iIarbor, st. Stephen. St John, Hall.
lax lax and Aroostook county: $40 4. nj. for
" atervile: Skowhegan, Bangor, Vance
boro and st. John; 1912 p. Nj. for Water.
vi Niiie: 2.35 +. NJ for Bangor. Bar Harbor.
Oid Town and Houlton via Il. & A.:3.4i
Z: N. Greenvilie via Foxcroft for Water.
Gle. Oakland, North Arson, Bingham.
skowhegan, Belfast. Bangor Old Town
and Mattawamkeag; 7.1S p. NJ. for Wat
ervllie: also on Sundays only; g15 A, M.
and 25o p. NJ. for Waterville and Bangor.
The Night Pullman Train going East
does not connect for Skowhegan on Nom
day mornings. or for Belfast Foxcroft
or beyond Bangor. Sunday mornings.
ACCOMMODATION pAJNS
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Mr.. and Mrs. J. P. Whitehouse ar
rived home Tuesday night, from Park
man. where they spent the summer
months.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Mrs. Carrie Sanford, who has been
visiting her sister, Mrs. E. J. Roberts,
has returned to her home at Brooklyn,
n Y
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

MIR. and Mrs. Myrton Livingston
Davis of St John. n. b., have been
visiting Mrs Gould, Bangor street.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01
MARKET REPORTS.
New York Money Market.

Money, 4M5.
Prime mercantile paper. 1mS.
Governments. firm.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Miss Jessie Bunker returned to her
home in Waterville, yesterday altei
making a visit in the city.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

through tickets to California and ali
points South and West may be had of =.
n. Walker, ticket agent, Augusta, the
only office in Augusta selling via ali
routes and checking baggage free of ex-
PAYSON TUCKER,
Vice Pres. and Gen. Manager
+. f. BOOTHBY.
Genl Pass. and Ticket Agent.
Portland. Sept. IS. 1896.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01
AUGUSTA LOCALS.

AOGOSlA LOCALS.
Dark brown is the river,
Golden in the sand.
1t flows along forever.
With trees on either hand.
Green leaves a-floating,
Castles of the foam.
Boats of mine a-boating-
Where will all come home?
On goes the river
And on past the mill.
Away down the valley,
Away down the hill.
Away down the river,
A hundred miles or more,
Other little children.
Shall bring my boats ashore.
R l.. Stevenson.
J. H. Pinkham of Bangor was in the
city last night.
L. J. Colgan of Kinsmans drug store
is on his vacation.
c. L. Andrews went to Oakland, last
evening, on business.
William j. Brown of Palermo was in
the city, Wednesday.
William Hoskins was here from
Waldoboro. yesterday.
Melville Watson has returned from
a weeks visit at Boston.
J. II. Barker of South Norridgewock
was in Augusta, Wednesday.
j. Clair Minot of Belgrade is in The
city visiting r. W. Leighton.
NJ. L. Delano, local meat dealer.
has petitioned into insolvency.
Horace r. Clapp of Boston was the
guest of c. S. Downing, yesterday.
Mrs. 7. ]. Tucker of Cambridge,
Mass, is visiting d. P. Knowlton.
Mr.. and Mrs. A. J. Trask of Noble
boro are visiting at d. p. Knowlton's.
An electric light has been placed at
the corner of Cony and Belfast streets.
G. T.. Terry of the Sawyer Publishing
Co. Waterville, was in the city, yes
tcrday.
Miss Jessie Bunker returned to her
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01
Railroads and Steamboats,.
MAINE CENTRAL RAILROAD.
Arrangement Of Trains in Effect
October 4. 1895.
THROUGH TRAINS.

Passenger trains leave Augusta as
follows:
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

G.. T.. Terry of the Sawyer Publishing
Co, Waterville, was in the city, yes
tcrday.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

| An electric light has been placed at
| the corner of Cony and Belfast streets.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

William j. Brown of Palermo was in
the city, Wednesday.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Mr.. and Mrs. A. ]. Trask of Noble
boro are visiting at d. p. Knowlton's
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Melville Watson has returned from
q weeks visit at Boston.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

William Hoskins was here from
Waldoboro. yesterday.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

]. H. Barker of South Norridgewock
was in Augusta, Wednesday.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

j. Clair Minot of Belgrade is in zht
city visiting r. w. Leighton.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

NJ. L. Delano local meat dealer,
has petitioned into insolvency..
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Mrs. 7. J. Tucker of Cambridge,
Mass, is visiting d. P. Knowlton.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1896-10-01

Horace b. Clapp of Boston was the
guest of c. S. Downing, yesterday.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02
LAWYER AGAINST HIMSELF.
Paid Judgment of s23.io and Came o"'
$3.50 Ahead on Ills Fee.

Talking about lawyers" said the man
from Wisconsin. as lie placed ms iee'
on the desk IN the hotel waitins-room
and lighted bad cigar, we've got some
beauts up our way
How is that?"
why they're out OF sight said the
drummer. Some OF them would Just SKIN
these fellows I'm Chicago who thlnk 'hey
are all the works. There IS one lawyer
in Menasha whose name IS Max schoel%,
and ne gets the big red apple. lie sueo
himself few weeks ago
What did he charge himself with
vagrancy?"
NO. IN ten you how 81 was. Down In
tho old Third ward of Menasha, Bernard
Kasel, who also represented the ward
In the CITY Council. used 10 run a morse
fair every Saturday. The paddock was
surrounded by a high and weii-braced
fence. against which the animals were
leaned. one day a milkman, VINO rcslded
a mile or so out of town, drove up 10
KasoIs and entered tho bar-room. Dur
ing his absence SchOctz, VINO was present,
unhitchod his horse and supplied us place
with one OF the equine curiosities from
the paddock. lie then went i'm and piled
the milkman with drinks until he was
propfr. Tho ride home 10 the vender OF
that he had never travelled so slow be
fore. but IL was not until he had entered
his own premises and his Oldest son asked
him where ne got tho "boneyard' that he
discovered the trick that had been play
cd upon him.
ct was nearly nightfall when he got
back 10 Kasors. but Schoetz and crowd
were waiting for him. and swore that ne
mad traded horses that afternoon IN thelr
presence. They thought however. 10y pay
ing a. little ITO boot he might trade back
AS the milkman's memory was httle
musty on the events OF the afternoon, ana
the evidence was so overwhelming, he
swallowed the story and gladly paid SO
TO get his horse back. The next day
WREN me discovered the trick that had
been played upon him, he was furious.
and visiting Schoetz, informed him that
he intended 10 at once commence an ac-
ton against him for damages
"T have always been your attorney
haven't I?' asked Schoetz
Yes, sir" replied his excellent
spid j ever lose you a case| continued
the lawyer.
d" No"
wen. let me handle this. and sue
myself
"rhe milkman agreed. and the trial
took place the next coy i'm Judge Nc
Cabe's court Schoetz prosecuted himself,
and the Judge found a judgment against
hiuf for S38. 40, which he imediately paid
He then presented q counter bill against
the milkman for $50 attorneys fees.
which was also Immediately settled.
III you've a lawyer in Chicago who can
beat that trot him Out."-Chicago Chron-
icie.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

IT'S in the home and not the hall
That laws are made which govern all
As sure as consequence and cause
A nations homes will make its laws;
And women need no sword nor pen
To make or mar the plans of men.
When dealing with unworthy laws
Look we'll O. statesman, 10 the cause,
You may not purify the stream
Save where the noXious evils TEEN;
False teachers now accurse our land
Disrupting homes on every hand.
II greater freedom" means to roam
Away. and so neglect the home;
Nav greater freedom be the sign
OF shame in those we deem divine!
And shame upon his head be poured
Who puts in woman's hand a sword
Oh for tho old-time mothers. who
Were gentle. patient loving, true!
Whose children ere they saw the light
We're bound with gives of truth ant
right.
Whose happiness came pure and sweet
From making home a heaven complete
So close they lived 10 natures breast
The wilderness TO them was blest.
No teachers, false. could lead astray.
And holy love held regal sway.
A power was theirs 10 guido and save,
The power which simple goodness gave
on. glorify the mothers crown
Aud throw these modern idols down!
Make wOman's joys more true and sweet
Unmarried by passion and deceit
Like old-time mothers make the new
As gentle. patient. loving. true
GORDON BLOOMFIELD.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

These are the days whoa women rule
And men must meekly bow.
The ardent swain his words must cool,
For times are different now.
Then hnger not so shyly here,
While bushes come and 20,
NAY. if you love me. Mary, dear.
Why don't you tell me so?
with tendorest words your heart I'd
thrill.
But usage bids beware
The places men are wont 10 fill
Are chosen by the fair.
Where once a lovers course was clear
Proprlety says NO"
Then if YOU love me. Mary, dear,
Why don't you tell me so?
4 rapturous trembling at my heart
PrOclaims you mid the throng-
Nay, nay; forgive me. l depart
From customs new, but strong.
IT'S yours Co speak and mine TO hear.
This impulse / fOrego.
But II you love me, Mary dear,
Why don you tell me so?
-Phhander Johnson IN Washington Star.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02
1 RemarknhIe CONVERSION.

The presence of Hon NJ W. Ransom,
United States Minister 10 Mexico. at the
Metropolitan. caused friend of his 10
relate remark made by an old colored
man down iu North Carolina, who was
q lifelong friend and admirer OF the ex-
Senator When the old man heard the
news about Gen. Ransom's appointment
To the Aztec Court ne exclaimed:
"And so dey has pinted Mars Matt a
minister has dey? Well. rs stonished
at dat Oh cose de gen'ral am a good
man, and amt got nothin' 10 say against
him. but still it beats me he'd turn
preacher in his ole days. But he's
powerful taiker. Mars Matt is, and
TN bet an ne cotton 7 raise dis year dat
he'll convert wagon load % sinners
cherry time ge gifts into dc pulpit. Wash.
ington Post.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02
Trnuhles Of an EIderIr Kansas Van.

Nathan Brown, aged so years. was ar
rested here to-day accused OF bigamy. 1T
is charged that he married the second
time while his application for divorce
from the mother Of his twelve children
was pending. Browns troubles came by
being too susceptible 10 the charms OF the
fair SEX lie was engaged 10 a prominent
Young lady here. but answered an adver-
tisement I'm matrimonial paper
and Tilted the Lawrence lady to
marry The new love. This so in
censed the relatives of the girl
that they began looking up his record and
found that he was guilty Of bigamy
Brown is a prominent member OF the
Methodist church on the North Side, and
one OF the most rtbid prohibitionists in
tho State Added 10 his other troubles
Brown is tho defendant IN a breach OF
promise suit.-Kansas city Times.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02
Fleeing thoughts.

Variety is the spice Of life.-Loweli
News.
A mountain Of pure sulphur has been
found out in California-Cincinnati Tri-
bune.
It IS better that tho war scare should
die than that men should die in battle.
st. PAU Globe.
The Sultan is running HIS constitution
by the excessive smoking Of cigarettes.
Springfield Union.
II will be entirely appropriate for ev-
cry man I'm town 10 wear bis skates this
week.-St Paul Globe.
Two lawyers in Baltimore fought in
open court because one Of them called
the other a liar.-Manchester Union.
At last we have a legal precedent. A
Georgia judge has fined a man FOR not
returning a borrowed Umbrolla-Cincin-
natl 1Tibure.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

AFTER Ilib NNAhNh''
Laws sakes. Ia rurthor heV INN mere
10 ovneelf kind and ready.
a noft'ring roun an whis ling clear
Jist as De- was yesteddy
10 think that tm.-y years and more
las gone rollin' bye,
AM never a fuss tuli this before
Has come tween him an ].
Three sons and dartcrs mcrricd now,
An two our boys As dead.
An De an ! hev this row
wen bitter words was said.
The house seems an so quiet, still.
The sun has loft the mark;
An soon I'u hear the whipper-wih
Call through the lonesome dark.
Tho clock keeps going tick. tick tack,
] wishf that + was dead
Nor crvin' here an rocking back,
My apron DER my head
Ishi what's that misc at the doorl
oh. Paw. IT'S you. it's YOU,
IH never scold you emmy more,
No matter what you do.
Fer real OLD folks like us TO fuss
IL seems "a dreadful sin
An you've got the kitchen all a muss
with yer muddy boots agini
Roy j.. McCardeiL
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02
Fun IN RHYMES.
81 will ne'er grow old"

IT will ne'er grow DID,,
Said a new old maid.
Tho for years and years
I've been on the fade.
For with bike In hand
All those years seem hid,
And | feel as young
As | ever did.
Then | never wait
For a man TO come,
But | mount my wheel
And for him hum;
am then so sorry
That I'm like KID
And feel as young
As l ever ala.
Henry Lippincott. in Milwaukee Jour-
nal
contentment? There amt no such thing;
It's nothin' but a word;
lis air. an happens 10 exist
Alone when IL is heard.
It's mighty strange ter notice how
Contrary nature Is,
They never was teller VT
Thet liked ter mind his biz.
I aIlus long ter cut tho grass
When wintry breezes blow,
And in July ] simply yearn
Fur jobs at shoyolin' snow.
Washington Star.
He stagars home. employing
The whole width OF the street.
He's lost his head. and there's even a
doubt
II he can keep his feet.
Detroit Tribune.
IT'S now the sninster starts TO find
The JOY that leap year keeps,
But she should always bear in mind
10 look before sho leaps.
Philadelphia Record.
I stole down by the brooklet side;
The moon was bright
I stole a dozen kisses there.
That hlissfW night.
/ stole q march on other men;
/ knew my part.
was so good at stealing that
| stole her heart.
Now we are happy man and wife,
Why seems IL strange
II, when I'm fast asleep In bed.
She steals my lchanse9
-YOnkers Statesman.
"Id love 10 hold your hand!r ne cried,
And now he's in a hun
Because the cruel maid replied,
NO wonder-youre a mulf."
Puck.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

Wulie-Pa, did Caesar practice polyg-
amy?
Father-No, my boy. What made you
think SOP
Wule-Because to-day my teacher said
that Calphurlia was Caesars wife. and
also that when be got the Rhine he pro-
posed 20 Briget.-Judge.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

Traveller 0n the WesD-Those Indians
are more OK less civilized are they not2
Native-Ciyllzed? Why, the medicine
man is treating six cases Of appended
tis.-Puck
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

"Dandelons I'm the grass.
Hold the gold thar spring viii pass
TO the summers Wanton June,
Coming. coming; all, so soon'
June viii take each dandelion.
With his golden helmet on.
Crown his head with feathery light.
Whit it OF some starry night.
Then she'll hide the yellow gold
In the daisy's petalled fold;
And the daisies IN the grass,
Current gold and silver pass"
Eleanor Mary Ladd, in Cherry Bloom.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

A Sure Thing-"You don't have pro-
fessional poet IN your system OF govern
ment," remarked the English statesman
10 Emperor william. No" was the re-
ply. when l want anything done well
] DO il myself Star
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02
Ma Nan Mlthnnl a Chnrch.

The last Bob Ingersoll conversion turns
out 10 be every bit as reliable as its pre-
decessors.-W Washington Post
Now that Chicago preacher has in
vited Bob lngersoll 10 fiji his pulpit. we
shall not be surprised TO hear Of ST. Peter
throwing open the peariy gates TO his
Satanic Majesty.-Chattanooga News.
Bob Ingersor is said to have discovered
a church in Kalamazoo which ust meets
his views in that IL has no creed. The
pastor is Miss Carrie Bartlett. formerly
q successful Unitarian preacher IN Sioux
Falls Minneapolis Tribune
Colonel Ingersoll wickedly observes that
ne feels toward those who have been
praying for him as the girl did toward the
young man who squeezed her hand. She
said. 1T pleases him and doesn't hurt
me" Better give him up.-Boston Herald.
IT'S leap year. And each minute, now,
My president soul, prophetic,
Forebodcs my speedy capture by
The maiden who's athletic.
Convention? IT'S her privilege.
To-day, jump straight thro' IL;
And where there's leaping 10 be done.
she's lust the one 10 do il.
M. \. y. in Boston Globe.
she-Do you think we are going TO
nave a war? He-Yes, / do. What do
Won think we are going to war on?"
ION paper. "-YOnkers Statesman.
"There are some things in this world
7 don't understand said Bobby. zone
Of them is why small boys have such
little stomachs and such large Ape
titles "-Harper's Bazaar.
Learning the LessOn-Hubby-Wh /
first got married / determined TO have no
large items of expense in housekeeping.
but / find after all that Il Is the little
things that count. Batch-liow many
have you? Hubby-I have four.-Detroit
Free Press.
Jones-Pve Just been doing something
that always makes me feel cheap. Smith
what is that? Jones-Comparins my
salary with what think IL ought TO be-
Brooklyn Life.
AT the Recent School Census-Police-
man (to young boy)-Your name. Pat
rick Kelley" What is your father
Dead" what was he before he died?'
"Aliye."-Texas Siftings. .
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

Advantages Of idenhood-Estelle-A
lover IS mucn more devoted than a hus-
band. MuriHa-Yes, indeed. and besides
one can have a whole lot OF lovers at
once.-Chicago Record.
The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1896-02-02

The hustle IS said 10 be coming into ia
vor again How would the hustle and
boomers 70 together buffalo News