The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1896-01-14

d
fer. He said that nobody but literary
man would be such wild, unfettered
ass. He is cynical TO degree. He told
me that all needed was nursing bot
tie connected with the Milky Way to do
real well.
consulted an attorney regarding the
matter. He also is local humorist.
He said that buying unbranded COM
cts on the range was hazardous in the
extreme, especially in the winter sea-
son. He wrote out quite long opinion
on the case, for which he charged me
an outrageous price, and in which he
stated that man who would advance
money on high spirited comet, relying
on the provisions of the Monroe doctrine
for the confirmation and preservation of
title, did not know enough to carry WIS.,
cera to bear.
He told me that it would have shown
more mental acumen if had exchanged
my North Minneapolis building lots and
Hudson's bay addition to Arctic park
for the Big Dipper and gone into the
shelf and heavy hardware business, but
to put cold cash, or ready John, as he
phrased it, into luminous hole in the
sky showed more possibilities as al in
tellectual disaster than anything he had
seen during six years experience as civil
service examiner for vacancies in idiot
asylums.
He went so far as to ask me why !
didn't catch my own comets by putting
salt ON their tails. / submitted to al
most every indignity from this man, in
Guiding a bill for SIS. He has been told
by friends that he is humorous, and it
has destroyed his usefulness. His bust
ness suffers, and his clients become Of
Tended and go elsewhere. Among other
things he asked me why did not organ
ize an International Lighting and
Heating company and pipe the surplus
heat from the burned district of future
state.
The astronomer told me that my
comet would come up every night, and
then he rolled up the money gave him
and went abroad for much needed rest
and change of scene. He told me that
he would have the astronomical record
changed so that it would hereafter be
referred to as Nye's comet, but he did
not do so. There has been nothing pub
hshed connecting my name with the
affair, and week after l bought it 1
mislaid it one night and have not seen
it since
am told also that these comets have
a way of changing their appearance and
then retiring to their former haunts.
The astronomer to whom allude and
who chiseled me out of my means had
long brass telescope on Broadway, and
he not only cracked up this comet TO the
very top notch, but he assured me on
his honor as a gentleman that it would
become a parent in the spring. Of
course, he said, l ought to reap some
dividend after a long, hard winter with
comet eating its head of, but June
would find me away ahead of the game.
Sometimes these comets have twins, he
said, and there you are, maybe with a
whole sky full of heavenly bodies at the
cost of one only.
Il
for 1t shows how my faith in my fellow
worm of the dust causes me TO be re-
viled by practical and cynical business
men IN this commercial age.
But this has been a lesson 10 me.
Some have been coarse and rude 70 me
when have tried to sell, while others
have treated me with well bred con-
tempt One man, who Is said TO literally
have money 10 burn, F" refused mycOmet
because the astronomer who sold 1t 70
re had not secured The scllDowledg-
ment Of his wife. l rega7C. that as a
mere technicahty, and so informed
him; but, no. he would not put his mon
ey IN comet, he said, and then in fu-
ture years. after / had passed beyond,
find himself confronted by heirs claim
ing a dover interest in his comet be-
cause ny conveyance did not show that
the wife Of the conveyer had been taken
apart and examined by the notary a.
required by law.
This proves that we live in a cold,
selfish world, and also that most liter
airy men are not practical l am not
Neither was Milton. Still am q little
more busineSslke than Milton. he got
fi5 for Paradise Lost however, and
that shows thar he was pretty keen On q
trade, | think. fer l had 10 analyze il
in my school days, aud when l heard
that John got $i5 for. it the .Sea c..us