The Republican journal., 1896-01-09

Why don't you turn your attention to
something more lasting?' asked the office
loafer to the funny man, "The k ind Of work
You turn out is so ephem4ra."
''Ephemeral!' echoed the police reporter
"Why, some of the stuff he has been writing
has been running for 800 years. Indian
apolis Journal.
No-To-Bac Sold and Guaranteed To Cure
the Tobacco-Habit by Kilgore & Wilson.
Miss East lat an Oklahoma BALI" Par
don me for treading on your toe, SIR
Alkali Ike (gallanty a-tall, nom I.
Not a-tall, 1 assure you. Pardon Inc for
havin' a toe. Puck.
AN OLD AND WELL-TRIED REMEDY-Mrs.
Winslow's Soothing Syrup has been used for
over fifty years by millions of mothers for
their children while teething, with perfect
success. 1t soothes the child, softens the
gums, allays all pain, cures wind collie, and
is the best remedy for Diarrhpa. Is pleas
ing to the taste. Sold by Druggists in every
part of the world Twenty-Five cents bot
tie. Its value is incaculable. Be sure and
| ask for Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup, and
take no other kind lyric
Elder Berry-"Wh hat is your idea of
faith? ''
Joblots-" putting nickel on the plate
and expecting crown of pure gold" New
York Herald.
To the Sufferers of rheumatism.
After using Grotf's Rheumatic Cure for
some time in my practice | take great pleas
ure in saying that it is a most wonderful
remedy for Rheumatism; in fact it is the
only one have found for the cure of this
disease i'll all its various forms.
Dr. E. E. Tull, Chicago.
Disappointed American I'm going
abroad
Sympathetic Friend-"What for?"
Disappointed American-"To become "a
naturaized Irishman. It's the only way
I'll ever carry an election" Truth
Bueklen's Arnlca Salve.
THE BEST SALvE in the world for Cuts,
Bruises, Sores, Ulcers. Salt Rheum, Fever
i Sores, letter, Chapped Hands, Chilblains,
Corns, and all Skin Eruptions, and positive
ly cures Piles, or no pay required. 1t is
! money refunded. Price % cents per box.
For sale by A. A. Howes & Co.
"Mamma," remarked Johnnie Runkles
after he had absorbed a potash lozenge
which had been given him for his sore
throat, wasn't Esau blamed idiot to sell
his blrthright for mess of this stuff ?"
Brooklyn Life.
You make no mistake when You buy Dali
TONS SARSAPARILLA AND NERVE TONIC and
DALTON s FAMILY PILLS. Every body says so,
and "what every body says must be true
Parrott-Do you think that Henpeck could
ever keep secret from his wife?
Wiggins-Well, I'll bet that he never let's
her know what he really thinks of her,
Truth.
Those who have used DR. Kings New Dis
covery know its value, and those who have
not, have now the opportunity to try it Free.
Call on the advertised Druggist and get
Trial Bottle Free. Send your name and adj
dress to HI. E. Bucklen & Co., Chicago, and
get sample box of DR.. Kings New Life
Pills, Free, as well as a copy of Guide to
Health and Household Instructor Free.
All of which is guaranteed to do you good
and cost You nothing. At A. A. Howes &
Co.'S Drug Store.
Harry" What girl was that you had in
tow last EVENING""
Willy Indignantly hat you are pleas
ed to call tow is usually spoken of by people
of culture as blonde tresses." Boston
! Transcript
Free Pills.
Send your address to H. E. Bucl<en & Co
Chicago, and get free sample box of DR..
Kings New Life Pills. A trial will con-
vince you of their merits These pills are
easy in action and are particularly effective
in the cure of Constipati n and Sick Head
ache. For Malaria and Liver troubles they
have been proved invaluable. They are
guaranteed to be perfectly free from every
deleterious substance and to be purely veg
etabl-. They do not weaken by their ac-
ton, but by giving tone to stomach and bow
els greatly invigorate the system. Regular
size 25r. per box. Sold by A. A. Howes &
Co., Druggists.
The trim young female orderly approach
ed the Captainess and saluted. The officer
returned the salute. The orderly spoke:
MADAM, Private Edith Netting has
headache this morning, and would like to
! have her breakfast in bed
Every well. Have it sent" Judge.
Whar Rol, occfolr Coz