The new dominion. [volume] (Morgantown, W. Va.) 1876-1904, 1896-11-28
NEWS NOTES AND IRONY.
Here and There Slash that is Felt.

HAGANs, Nov. 23.-The farmrs of this
are waiting for the moon to wan.
they assassinate their swine.
Owing of course to the election, oul
town is enjoying boom that words are
feeble to describe. George Nicely and
Ross Michael have erected a blacksmith
shop under the spreading sugar tree and
now the merry ring of the anvil greets
the ears of our villagers.
William Michael and wife have NOV
ed to Jake's Run.
B. F.Miller is working in Warrington.
Lot Musgrave is slowly recovering
from the fever.
The solemn singers of superstition
that have been supporting the syndcates
will now begin to manufacture malicious
Misrepresentation concerning the great
and gallant souls that endured the
gloomy winter at Valley Forge and Sc.
cured the victory at Yorktown. The
exhibition of ingratitude that some oil
the inconsistent distributors of decayed
creeds make, defies explanation.
Stephen G. Hess has moved to Barnes
vile.
Owing to circumstances that we are
unable to explain our young man tina,
dwells on the hillside continues to live a
life of single blessedness.
One of the young men of Georgetown
passed through here en- route to prom
Using Cole region on Pedlar's Run. We
may be too pessimistic but his MANY
strolls on Stewards run remind us OF
the thought, "He that tries to cap
ture two birds gets neither"
Miss Nancy Toothman, of Fairmont,
was in our village recently.
The secretary of the United Indian
Grave Diggers Association, Limited, has
issued call requesting the members of
that order to assemble in the near future
and make necessary preparations for the
ventilation of certain stone-walled man
sions that are supposed to contain traces
of once troublesome tribe. 1t is need
less perhaps to state that these prelim
mary steps were taken against the I'M
solicited advice of the ghost deluded and
witch believing pieces of humanity Ad-
ditional members are desired, but owing
to the prevalence of superstition but few
are expected to join. The principal in
ducement is that the civic wreath has
fallen on the brow of one of the ex-mem-
bers who is now postmaster. The result
of their deliberations and investigations
will be given to your readers with the
hope they will be read with pleasure
and weighed with care.
Melville and Jane Michael are visiting
in Richie county.
q. l.. Shuman is wearing a stupen-
dous smile and all because new silver
lite has appeared at his place.
Without expecting to do the subject
justice we shall try to convey to your
readers a faint idea of the monstrous and
soul stirring "thuse" that the gold bugs
recently began in our neighboring VII
lage OF McCurdysville. 1t was an ex-
traordinary affair and words are made
quate to describe it in all its dazzling
splendor and thillling nagnifcence. The
republicans began to arrive soon AFTER
dark and were painfully surprised at
the large number OF democrats present
A delegation of gold bugs came up from
Hoodsville which according to conserva-
tive estimates numbered between three
and four and when the last struggling
supporter of England's financial policy
arrived it was found that there were ex-
actly IL apostles present. Then they
began their unsuccessful attempts to
make more noise than the democrats
and failing in this they in their despera-
ton called for the ex-Sunday School
superintendent who rendered no assist
ance worth mentioning. 1t was indeed
an inspiring scene and we might say
with the poet that, "Some were full OF
love divine, and some were full of
brandy" One intelligent republican
that claimed to have assisted several il
literate voters on election day became
very indignant and remarked with great
dignity that they made his American
blood "bile." The display Of patriotism
by this optimistic and ostentatious oriole
was truly wonderful. Soon the sad sons
of rest became discouraged and each
started to their respective homes with
"that tired feeling and damaged
voice box. Let us hope they have re-
covered and will SOON give the democrats
another entertainment: Perhaps alas
that day will never, never come