New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1896-09-13
THE TRAMP FROM LOUISVILLE.
HOW HE WAS CRUELTY IMPOSED UPON BY A
FORMER RESIDENT.


FORMER RESIDENT
"My dear" said Mrs. subbubs across the break
fast table. "Ihe tramps are getting to be into,-
erable.'
Lots OF em. eh? queried the Colonel dropping
third lump of sugar into his coffee
Il should saw So" responded his better half.
'New-Jersey seems full Of them"
Worse than they used to be In LouisvillcT'
louisville wasn't circumstance. The tramps
more polite there too. Southern gentlemen In
distress they called themselves. Up here they com
plain IL the cook doesn't make their coffee sweet
enough"
II know they dc. confound EN-" growled tho
Colonel MARY told me that one OF em had the
impudence last week to tell her how his mother
used to make griddle-cnkes
Mrs Subbubs smiled incredulously but sweetly
and sighed. I'm I don't know what can do
with them all. They In such droves that
have keep the dog tied up all tho time now
The colonel dropped his fork with crash We'll.
I like that" he said
I'm so glad. dear" replied his wife, helping
herself to n roll Il study to please"
you know what | mean" snorted the Colonel.
"You know that when / said liked that meant
didn't Ike It, What's the use OF twisting things
"Why do IT, them And che smiled with ex-
nsperating good humor. Mrs Subbubs was never
so delighted as when she was teasing her husband.
He perfectly aware of this fact, and as he
loved very much he pref ended TO be greatly en-
ragged several times a day.
"What do you think bought you dog for but
10 keep tramps away" he cried. with somewhat
more energy than the magnitude Of the subject
demanded do you think l bought him to NOW
the lawn with. or perhaps you think I'm train
I ing him to feed the chickens"
The soul Of Mrs. Subbubs thrilled with pleasure
She toyed gently with the crumbs about her plate
as she said:
you buy me lots OF strange presents. DO you
remember what YOU brought me my last birth
day?'
How do I know? You have so many Birthdays
said he. brutally.
"A box of cigars" she said. 1T was so like YOU
You are so thoughtful of me"
The Colonel only grunted Then he relapsed into
silence emerging later to remark, "Well. anyway
got the better of one Of them the other night
May I ask what yon are talking about In
qured Mrs. Subbubs politely.
"Tramps" said the Colonel shortly
ooh. yes. to be We were talking about
tramps But that so long ago"
But the Colonel not 10 be drawn off this
time. Il coming across City Hall Park the
other night
"The night you lost your key, got home at
O'Clock in the morning and made such a nuisance
OF yourself getting n?' inquired his wife sweety.
ct was only 1870" said the Colonel stouty.
at was o'clock. my dear"
well It doesn't make any difference what time
Il was so far as this story concerned. l was
coming across City Hall Park
80 you said"
across City Hall Park" he went on resolutely.
when | met a creature who stopped me with the
remark that he was a stranger. told him dld
not doubt It In the least lie added that he was
hungry | replied that he had good right
TO be hungry as any one | knew and started on
The creature kept at my heels whimpering that ne
had walked all the way from Louisville and was
nearly starved to death
louisville. eh?' said Mrs. Subbubs. getting IN
terested in spite Of herself.
Il perceive that you touched said the
Colonel passing his cup for more coffee so was
/ Louisville fetched me- | stopped again and took
a good look at the creature. He was hard-looking
thing But still he came from Louisville.
"'stranger here eh?' said. The creature as
sured me that he had only in town two hours.
"'Al the way from Lousvile| continued. lie
declared that ne had just walked in' and that he
was ready TO drop from fatigue told MIN that
used TO live In Louisville myself. AT this news
the creature opened his heart and descanted AT
length upon the beauties of the city. and wound
up by wishing he had been struck with several
different kinds of awful deaths before ever he
had left Louisville. IT, .ro "a
LonlsvH4I Hd.Y 'mnrmafed. Bythe-way. did you
"a l. ok Of sincere pleasure ovespread his boated
face he murmured, Why; certainly lily knew 'i"
%Fi Is TG possible erica YSa Tssd to work o il
Jim Carriers hardware store IN Dawes d,d wen ell
S Men; wf 10 lea We?o nave '"o"s"'
THE creature tWlstcu hDOul
audibly Then he said We'll. ye see. Jim n didn't |
gt long tergther He got ter be leetle too oossy
ter suit me n so lef I'M
linn was d nice man. though. ventured
The crea ture agreed with me. He WIZ lie WIZ
he wheezed. When did yc see i'm las ia IKE |
fer see Jim agin He silent moment while |
lite brain was filled with the teeming memories |
81 better DAYS in dear old Louisville.
81 hated 10 recall him TO the bleak present. but |
had to do IT, IN the first place., said there isn't
any lanes Carter in Louisville. In the second |
place there isn't any Davis-st there and IN me
third place tn to ,be Is ,oce as a variant
THE creature looked as II he medltated hlght.
ca continued But in consideration OF the afnuse-
mcnt YOU have afforded me VIII give you tne
sun, of 81 with which If you don't 20 TO the Astor
IInmse I think YOU can contrive TO get drunk
And did YOU really give him the dollar askeu
Mr. Suhbubs who had long ago become SO inter-
ceto1 that she had forgotten 10 tease the colonel
q really did he replied. the lhst saw on |
the creature lie was making for the Bowery az
fmu sneed From which concluded that ne pun M,
va, ~, 20 me inudable purpose had suggested
Win thaf the Colonel went around the table.
,issed his wife and started on his matutnal sprint
for the train. 49, a., ,orob md watched his
oo"t;a,s disappear around the corner Ihrh she
went and loosed the dog