davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

There does not appear 10 be anybody
in congress who is capable OF framing a
measure that would give the country the
financial reform it needs. Bills 10 cure
this or that financial III are being intro
duced all the time. but none of them re-
ceives much attention. The reason they
do not is probably that none Of them is OF
much account. and. besides. the belief
that nothing Will be done until there
congressman indisposed 10 do anything
towards remedying financial evils.
a few days ago Senator Teller intro
duced a bill which provides that national
banks shall not keep their reserves in
New York. II seems that it is the prac-
tice Of the country banks TO send their
reserve funds TO the New York banks.
from which institutions they receive a
low rate OF interest. The consequence is
that IN the summer season. when the
country banks have little call for money.
their deposits in New York sometimes
amount 10 as much as $2000O0,O00.
The position Senator Teller takes IS
that this practice keeps money scarce
and dear in the country districts, while
New York has more money than she can
use proftably. He thinks that the coun-
try banks should keep their reserves in
their own vaults.
1t is a question whether Senator Tellers
bill would have the effect Of making money
more plentiful away from the money
centers. The banks would not send their
money to New York for the little inter
est they get for it there il they could
loan it out at home on good security.
Another bill that has just been intro
duced provides for the establishment of
national banks having a capital of only
10000. The author of this dill is of the
opinion that If it should become a law
small banks would be established in the
villages and small towns in all parts of
the country. At present the smallest
amount of capital a national bank can
have is $4,000
The Introduction of bills of this char
acter shows that our money system needs
a thorough overhauling. There is plenty
of money in the country. but it does not
seem to be distributed as it should be-
The present congress, instead of trying to
kin time in considering matters of minor
Importance, should devote itself to the
enactment Of a banking law that would
cure the defects in the present money
system of which the people complain.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

The Cincinnati Enquirer tells the fol-
lowing good one" Owing to the illness
of his regular Office boy, DIR. Joseph Mar
Gus some weeks ago hired new boy
named Tommy Jones. Tommy was a
Jewel, and when Joe, the first incum-
bent, convalesced, the doctor was loath
to let Tommy go. But Joe wanted to
come back to his soft berth, and pleaded
with his former employer. way out
of the dilemma seemed to present it.
self, for the doctor said: Joe, If you
can put the other boy out you can get
your job back" Do. DO you mean =, that l
of it." ''All right" When DR.. Marcus
returned to his Office that night he met
a sight ne never bargained for. The
glass in the door was smashed into
smithereens. A marble clock on the
mantel was minus dial, glass or hands,
and a handsome Office chair reposed on
three legs; but Joe was in victorious pos
session, nursing swollen cheek. Tom
my's gone" he said with grin. The
doctor said nothing, but as he made a
silent survey of the wreck of his house
hold goods he imagined the scene that
had preceded the eruption, and made a
mental vow never to advise harshly again.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
BRIGHT BITS.

wonder what Timmins has struck?
He looks as If the literary market were on
the boom"
HE is writing curtain speeches for act
ors."-St Paul Pioneer Press.
Tommy. you didn't come to school
yesterday afternoon
Nom there wuz a circus in town, an
paw, an nav, an Aunt Caddie, an Uncle
Tom. an Cousin Bob all wanted to take
me.'-ChicagO Record.
-Editor-This fellow is littering the Of
flee up with his miserable poetry. Wen
have to put a check on him.
Poet (who has heard the word check,
rushing in)-Tll be obliged If you'll let me
have the check right away, sir.-Philadel-
phia North American.
IF people go to the opera to show their
Clothes he began.
"Yes?" she said inquiringly
IF people go to the opera to show their
clothes" he repeated, 81 should think
some of them would wear more of them
than they do."-Chicago Post.
He freely talked of dynamite,
This anarchistic churl;
He'd send the kings and plutocrats
All skyward in a whirl-
But he always let his wife blow up
indianapolis Journal.
Now, as to ofice-holding," observed
Uncle Allen Sparks, ''it strikes me about
like this: Positive alderman; compare
tive, state senator; superlatiVe, congress
man. And / wouldn't turn my hand over
for the difference, either. One is about as
worthless as the others. Chicago Trib-
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
PERSONAL.

The trousseaux for the royal brides
Princess Maud of Wales and her cousin
Princess Alexandria of Coburg-are al
ready IN course of preparation. Both are
being made almost exclusively in Eng
land.
"A commercial traveller from Marseilles,
to whom was shown the house at Besan-
son where Victor Hugo was born, ex-
claimed contemporary: That tumble
down placel All if he'd been born in
M7arseilles it would have been something
like a house"'
Queen Victoria has only once or twice
awaited herself of the privilege of driv-
ing down the middle of Rotten Row-a
prerogative belonging exclusively to the
reigning sovereign. From this ancient
privilege came the name Route due
Roi," contracted into Rotten Row"
Senator Beranger is the DR.. Parkhurst
and Anthony Comstock of Paris. He is
leading a crusade against vice in the
French capital, hut at the present mo-
ment vice is many laps ahead of the
reformers. Vice in Paris is not hypocrit-
ical but artistic, and is therefore harder
to suppress than in cities where 1t is sim
ply hideous.
The late Lady Burton was credited
with saying chat a man frequently had
many characters-one for his wife, an
other for his family, third for his men
and another for the public-but that the
wife, if they are happy and love each
other, gets the pearl out of the various
oyster shells"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
Why Suffer From Nervous Debility
When others Are Surely Cured9

II you sur1er from nervous debility ~
It's accompanying afiictions-sleer,,...-
ness neuralgia, dyspepsia. exhans,io-,
nervous rheumatism. spasmodic s.s-br,.
lessened vigor Of mind or body-ston -
fering- A sure specific is offered Won i
Dr. Charcot's Kola Nervine Tablets p
the Following letters, the authentic orr
nals OF which are on file.
Prot- n J. Cramer. East Orange \
Feb l4th. 1886. For years I have s,-s
Tered from Neuralgia, which affected M
whole nervous system. friend recon,
mended DR.. Charcot's Kola Nervine ~
lets. have been taking 3 to Tablets -.
day and find that they have strenrtbsr.s
my whole nervous system 1 conei5o-
mem an efleient remedy for nervous
]. c. Nordling. Asst. Cashier First ".
Bank, Harley. IcEa: Please send a.
another box o. Or. Charcots Kola NJ
Inc Tablets. They are good
James r. Courtney. No. 173 Court g
Boston, Mass, MaPch 5th, 1886: ~,
ought to receive much commend tio,, s o1
giving TO suffering humanity Dr. Charcot'.
kola NerYine Tablets. They have -
me OF that terrible malady insomnis-
while nothing else afforded relief: one br,
OF the Tablets brought sound and refregbNN
ing sleep" 9H-
Henry A. White, 48 Somerset St. Boston
1IlSdss', MdIch "a, 1870; some weeks AGO
had severe attack of Quinsy sore tbro2t
winch lett me weak and emaciated -
using DR.. Charcots Kola Nervine Table,
They are marvellous in recuperatine pron-
efueS and are giving me VigOr and Aesbi =,
Send for free booklet containing scoro,
OF testimonials, each guaranteed.
Fifty cents and S1.00 per box Zone NINTH,
treatment. See DR.. Charcot's name on
box. kola booklet free. All druggists or
sent direct. Eureka Chemical & MIC ~ ~
La cross, Wis, and Boston, Mass -
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

The MORNING NEWS is published
every day in the year. and is served 10
subscribers in the city. or sent 10y mail,
at SlO0 a month, 500 for six months, and
5000 for one year
The MORNING NEWS by mail, SIX
times a week without Sunday issue)
three months. 500; SIX months. $780, one
year. 500
The WEEKLY NEWS.2 issues a week
Monday and Thursday, by mall one
year. Sl.oO.
Subscriptions payable in advance. Re
nit by postal order. check or registered
letter. Currency sent by mail at risk OF
senders.
Transient advertisements, other than
special column. local or reading notices
amusements and cheap or want column
10 cents a line Fourteen lines OF agate
type-equal TO one inch square in depth
IS the standard of measurement Con-
tract rates and discounts made known on
application at business office.
Orders for delivery Of the MORNING
NEWS to either residence or place OF
business may be made by postal card
or through telephone No. 30. Any irreg-
ularity in delivery should be Immediately
reported to the Office of publication.
Letters and kilograms should be ad-
dressed MORNING NEWS" Savannah,
Ga.
EASTERN OFFICE. % Park Row, New
York City. c. S. Faulkner, Manager.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
Lost His nride by a Nose.

"Achoo." sneezed David F'inkelstein.
The wedding bonds were broken, says a
New York dispatch in the Chicago Trib-
une.
So was his improvised nose the cause
of all the trouble. Now there is legal diff
ticulty galore.
an East Side belle, met young Finkelstein,
and she learned to love him. But a knOwl-
edge of his heart did not include inside in
formation as to David's nose, which in
truth had been supplied with s. rubber
cartilage in place of the one nature had
originally put there.
after a months courtship.
Finkelstein caught cold in his head. He
and his wife were visiting at the home of
the brides parents. Finkelstein held his
sneezes as long as he could and then sue
cumbed to nature.
In the sneeze his nose fell to the floor.
His father-in-Iaw saw the daughter had
been deceived and promptly kicked Fin
kelstein out of the house.
Now his wife has brought suit for the
annulment of the marriage and Finkel-
stein has rejoined by suing his father-in-
law for $1,000.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

The freaks are at the front in New
York this week. A blind man is on trial
on the charge Of murder. an armless wo-
man is in jail on the charge Of stealing
a pocketbook from her benefactress. and
an armless. legiess and brainiess colored
boy, known IN the museums as the turtle
boy" has been married 70 a young ana
pretty white girl. II view Of these very
queer happenings. u might not BE- a. mat
ter 20 attract extraordinary attention II
the editors u tbe sun and the World were
10 go down 70 dlnner together Al DePs.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
Time to Pay Them.

A constituent of Senator Harris met
that gentleman the other day for the first
time in a dozen years, says the Pittsburg
Dispatch. The greeting between the two
Tennesseeans, as may well be imagined,
was cordial 1t was emphasized by sundry
croOkings of the elbows.
"Ah, senator" remarked Mr. Harris
constituent, smacking his lips you don t
look a day older than you did the last
time l saw you
I'm little grayer, possibly" suggest
ed the senator, with a. pleased smile.
You are looking in excellent health,
too" pursued his friend.
Thank you And do you know" con-
tinued the senator that am "a years old,
and never paid but one doctors bill in my
life, and that for a broken arm2'
rs that so?" asked the friend, in sur
prise.
Fact, I assure you"
well, senator" said the friend, with a
significant smile don't you think it is
almost time you were paying some of them
and preserving your credit2'
The senator moved for an executive Ses-
sion and presented a bill of explanations.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
PcnnsyIvania's Candidate.

Pennsylvania will have a candidate at
Chicago 1t would be remarkable if the
democrats should take their standard
bearer from strong republican state
But ex-Gov. Robert +. Pattison has been
twice elected governor of Pennsylvania
Each time he overcame large republic
can majority. The last time he was elect
ed his majority was about 1900. At the
same election the republican candidate
for lieutenant governor was elected by
a ajority of 10000. 1t is apparent, from
these figures that in Pennsylvania Mr..
Pattison is a great deal stronger than
his party. If nominated for President,
would he run as well as he did when he
was a candidate for governor? His friends
answer that question in the affirmative.
Mr.. Pattison is man of ability and
integrity. That is why the people of
Pennsylvania admire him, and elect him
to Office whenever they have the opportu-
nifty to do so. He has held other Offices
than that of governor, and in each of
them he was faithful and conscientious.
and thoroughly devoted to the public well
fare.
There are not many democratic presi-
Dental candidates in sight. No one of
them is, as yet, making any special eff
fort 10 get the nomination. Mr., Whitney
declares he does not want it. Mr.. Car
Isle says he is not in the race. The third
term tradition IS against Mr.. Cleveland.
Mr. Olney is not thought to be available.
This does not seem to be Senator HIS
year. and Mr.. Morrison does not appear to
be entirely satisfactory. Under the cir
cumstances, there is an opening for Mr.
Pattison. Being a resident of a sound
money state, and a banker, it is taken
for granted that he is a sound money
man. Mr.. Harrity, the chairman of the
national democratic committee is a sound
money man. and he is so much of ar
admirer of Mr.. Pattison that he declares
that he will take a solid Pennsylvania
delegation to Chicago for him. There are
forces at work for him that insure him
a strong support at Chicago.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
a Great Dinner.

This is a London story which seems fresh
and sounds improbable. and is likely
enough to be true. says the Worcester Ca
zette- a young man who had lived quietly
and simply in the country came into a lit
tie money, and like a fool rushed OF al
once 10 town 10 throw il away. knowing
nobody the process was at first slow and
even difficult. But he heard in restaurants
he frequented young men who had money,
II not brains or breeding, bOasting of the
money they had spent at dinners He heard
one say: 4 had great dinner last night
and ii cost me 800" So the next day, this
young Moses Primrose appeared at an ex-
pensive restaurant, and calling a waiter
explained pOmDOusly: See here, 1 want
an expensive dinner. like the rest of the
eggs
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

From the Chicago Evening Post.
This wheeln' game struck Bowie Forks,
an struck 1t hard, you bet,
An most the boys in RileyS place Is
talkin of it yet,
For all was kinder startled-like an owned
to bein' beat
The day that Martins Sary Ann came
sailin' down the street.
We knowed she'd got a two-wheeled
thing, on which she aimed to ride,
But not a one expected that she'd try to
ride astride;
In fact, we hadn't fingered on the clothes
she'd likely wear,
An when She scooted through the town
you'd oughter seen us stare.
She had two bags upon her legs that end
An not a skirt of any kind, as all the
boys agrees.
These bags was red an fastened with a
little belt of blue,
While jest above the waist of white show
ed that her heart was true.
An she went a-scootin' by, a-sitting' there
or Martins bosom seemed to swell with
great an joyous pride,
An putin down his OF clay pipe an
givin' us a smile,
He said the things was boomers an the
very latest style.
Then Six-Notch Hank declared himself,
like one who knowed the game,
That he was shy in dealin' with a queer,
new-fangled name:
"An' these things may be boomers, gents;
that much" he says, Il grants,
But If that's SO, then boomers is another
name for pants"
At that we gets to arguin', and puts it to
a vote
To settle what this "bloomer" word NAV
rightfully denote.
An by that vote we settles it. without
another glance,
That boomers is travesty on self-re.
specting pants.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

"Once upon a time" said ex-Congress-
man Peel of Arkansas. at the Metropoli-
tan, according to the Washington Post,
Il heard Mr.. Lanham of Texas. then a
congressman, say to his colleague and
better for both of them to retire from po-
litcal life and return to their homes and
make some money from the practice OF
their profession.
You know, Culberson,' said Lanham,
that 5000 a year hardly pays the ex-
penses of living in Washington, and as
for saving anything, that is impossible
Both of US can make more money than
that practicing law
Yes, Lanham.' responded the other, ]
admit the truth Of what you say. It's nc
comes powerful regular
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

The census reports show that in the
state of Massachusetts the women greatly
outnumber the men. It is therefore nee
essarily the case that the chances for a
young woman to get husband are smaller
than in some of the other states When a
Massachusetts woman marries more than
one time. she deservedly earns the hard
feelings Of her sisters who have not been
fortunate enough TO catch on once. There
is, therefore, considerable hard feeling
against that Eastern Massachusetts great
grandmother, aged rs. who the other day
married rich young man of 20, after she
had already buried two husbands.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
INDEX TO NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.

Special Notices-Ship Notice, J. F..
Minis & Son: Trains for schwarzville;
The Waverley Bicycles, r. D. VIM.
baltimore; Ship Notice; Suachan & Co.,
Consignees; Drink Cobana Coffee, Smith
Bros. & Co, Limited; Twenty-Horse En-
CINE and Boiler Wanted, Bohan & Cowan;
Poultry, Estate S. w. Branch; Your Trade
is What We Are Seeking. John T. Evans
& Co; Fine Fresh Strawberries as Usual,
Mutual Grocery Company; Fresh Straw
berries, VIM. G.. Cooper; Notice of Award
of Bicycle. at Murphy's Store.
Business Notices-Le Panic Cigars. H.
f Kuck; Seed for Forage Crops, J. T.
Shuptrine.
Ten Per Cent. Discount-B. H. Levy &
Bro.
The Seed In the Pumpkin-Appel &
Schanl.
Tobacco-Blackweus Genuine Durham
Tobacco.
Seed for Forage Crops-J. T. Shuptrine.
Silverware Gorham Manufacturing
Company.
Does It Strike You?-Leopold Adler.
Medical-Hood's Sarsaparirla: Cuticura
Remedies; Browns Iron Bitters; DIR. Chi
cots Kola Nervine Tablets.
Mems Strictly Fashionable Furnishings
--Falk Clothing Company.
Excursions-Sunday Afternoon Sail, per
Steamer Vigilant.
To the Southern Summer Tourist-Edw.
p Harris, Chief Clerk De Soto.
Steamship Schedule-Ocean Steamship
Company.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Ruggles and
Place Aux Danes. at Masonic Temple.
Cheap Column Advertisements-He
Wanted; Employment Wanted; For Rent;
Eor Sale; Lost; Personal; Miscellaneous.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

Congressman Lawson of the Eighth dis
trict regards it as his duty to remain at
Washington and attend to the public bus
mess as long as congress is in session.
He is also of the opinion that persons
who run for congress as democrats should
be squarely on the democratic national
platform. For these reasons he is not dis
posed to commence a canvass of the
Eighth district as a candidate for a re-
nomination just at this time. While he is
waiting for the proper time to inaugurate
a campaign. if it should transpire that the
national democracy adopts a platform
which he can support, vigorous effort is
being made by certain free silver bosses
to force him out of the race. 1t may be
depended upon that Judge Lawson will
not be forced out. He is one of the strong
est and sopndest democrats in the Geor-
gia delegation, and when he goes upon
the stump in his district. his people will
listen to him and come to see that his
views are correct.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
Says the London Globe:

Says the London Globe: 1.-THE last of
the Potwallopers' Is dead. His name was
Richard Atkinson. his age 81. ana the scene
Of his pOtWalloping giOries the ancient
borough Of POntefract The 'potwalloner'
was man who acquired the franchise by
the extraordinary process Of having boiled
his own pot in the constituency for six
months before the election As an cleo
toral class they were as was natural sun
timely corrupt. and were desergedlv aloi-
lhned in lk5l They We're. however. a pic
tufesque survival OF. probably. the oldest
franchise next 10 that OF the sforty-shiii
ing freeh0idcr' "
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
The ExtravaRance of Congress.
From the Baltimore Sun DENY.

It IS remarkable that there is no abate-
ment Of expenditure in view Of the hard
times In the country at large or in view
OF the deficit OF the treasury for two
years past. Are we. like Italy or like the
French republic, 10 go on spending more
than our Income? Can we afford 10 do
~ VIII not extravaganza land US in
dinicultIes7 IN may be answered that our
resources are immeaaurable. and that we
can DO a. W. like This answer is often
heard. But b - folly our resources. as
and for their further development we need
foreign capital, which VIII NOT flow IN
10 long - we continue - manage the
government Ia a proaigai, happy-go-lucky
manner.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

1t is greatly to be regretted that the
elections committee of the House could
not rise above partisanship, and therefore
gave the seat from the First South Carroll
ma district TO George Washington Murray.
colored, in place Of Col. William Elliott.
the sitting member. The First is the
Charleston district, the most important
in the state. Col. Elliott is one of the few
statesmen in the House. a democrat TO
the backbone and eminently sound on all
of the questions before the people. He is
man Of the class Of Turner Of Georgia.
Of which class there are too few men in
public life. He has served his constituent
cy and the country to good purpose in con-
sress. and his retirement and the giving
Of his place 10 a negro without informa-
pon or influence Is a distinct loss TO the
whole people.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

Hurrah for the pilots! 1t seemed that
they were surely beaten in congress. But
they have come out with a broom at the
masthead, instead of with their flag half
masted. The New England ship owners
sent all sorts of small craft to Washing
ton to try to foul the pilots or to take the
wind out of their sails, but failed Again,
hurrah for the pilots, a class of men as
brave. and true and generous as ever trod
deck or dirt!
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
didn't Know the Locality.

The healthfulness OF Lynton. a summer
resort in Devon. England. is advertised by
this story, says the Cleveland Recorder.
Recently a visitor began to talk 10 an old
man in Lynton, and asked him his age
"nSre upon ne said; I am just over 10 -
Well" said the visitor. You look as il
you mad good many years TO live yet. At
what age did your father dep
ather dead" said the man, looking
surprised. Father isn't dead; he's up
stairs putting grandfather to bed"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11
Secretary CarIisIe's Letter.
From the Brooklyn Eagle Deml.

1t is not a letter that removes him from
the list of presidential candidates. Those
who point out that he does not say he
would decline the nomination If rendered
TO him should remember that he is a
member of the cabinet. The drift of SEN
timent toward Mr.. Carlisle the party can
afford to note with encouragement. 1t
should tend to some extent to relieve the
atmosphere Of gloom which has of late
baar ca haat1r
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1896-04-11

The Ohio legislature has passed a bill in
shutting the scotch treat system in that
state; that is, nobody may ask friend to
have drink or smoke, and pay for it.
There is no limit upon ones individual
drinking, but the drinker must pay for
the liquor consumed by himself only. The
morals of the law may be good, but it will
be mighty selfish in operation.