New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1896-09-18
I rTNVy CONNECTICUT CONVENTION.

I FUNNY con IItti foN ' Nv ffON.
Occasionally things happen in this world in
themselves so funny that 1t Is like painting the
lily or gliding refined gold to undertake. to say
anything funny abour them. The only thing to
do is TO tell the story in the simplest way ana
let IT take care Of itself in provoking laughter.
The so-calpd Democratic State Convention OF
Connecticut which met al Ncw-liaven on
Wednesday, h,lrriedly transacted the business
for which It was called tog Their and trcklrd
back into the oblivion from witch 1t had eXnden'
was one Of that sort Of things To any one III
all familiar with Connecticut politics the literal
and unadOrnPd report Of the proceedings ana
the results must seem funner than several phr-
rels of trained monkeys. Not that there WAS
anything like hilarty; the whole performance
was as melancholy as a wake without whiske!'
and as dismal as gathering of ncighbors from
cyclone cellars after the storm has passed over
1t began with the formal resignation OF Clinton
Il. Davis, chairman Of the state Committ""-a
very shrewd politician. who, in spite or some
Objectionable outs" had certainly done MS
party good service for many years-and was
followed by the resignation of Frederic j. Brown,
secretary Of the committee. Then in answer 10
an inquiry from a member Of the committee.
who viewed the crunbling away of the commit
tee with disgust as 10 how the committee stood
on the silver question. cX-COngrcssman "BoD
Vance with his own red-hcaded ffankneSs de-
clarcd that he could not support the chicago
platfOrm or nominees and hc went Off. hilbert
r. Cary. OF Ridgefcld. who had been named as
candidate for Governor. followed in the same
line The designations numerous that
the committee seemed about 10 be left without
n quorum II was also understood that Carlos
French the Connecticut member of the National
Committee. was opposed % the Bryan ticket ana
would resign from the committee.
All of which was funny 1t was still funnier
for spectators 10 observe that the "warhorses
being all missing even Ex-Governor Waller hav-
ing been defeated for delegate from his own
town of New London-the Convention had fallen
into the hands Of Alexander Troup. Editor or
"The Ncw-IIaven Jnion.' and Edward NJ.
Graves of Hartford two Of the Oldiime Green
hackers. who had fought their way through
sneers and kicks and cuffs to the control nj last
of a Democratic State Convention. The absence
Of the old timers was further emphasized by
the fact that THE Union was the only sup
porter Of the Bryan ticket in the Democratic
press Of the State. When before in the political
history of Connecticut did The Hartford Times
fail to stand by a Democratic Convention? Or
when did "The Ncw-lIaven Register cover
Convention Of It's own party with rdicule and
contempt by open opposition and biting sarcasm?
These. and. in fact. the whole Democratic press
Of the State with perhaps one or two obscure
exceptions which Will take pleasure in
naming upon their sending rs notice-stood on
and either openly denounced or sneeringly
laughed at the whole performance And then
this queer body of delegates. after ndorsing the
Boy Orator Bryan and his platform with all that
both imply Of hostility to capital and war Of
"the masses against classes" nominated the
millionaire manufacturer. Joseph b. Sargent Of
Haven. for Governor. Topsy-turvies in
politics have been by no means unusual. but such
an altogether funny fphop % the Connecticut
Democrats have made comes near breaking the
record
One thing only was lacking 10 make the per
Torrance funner and even bring a laugh to the
faces Of the delegates themselves. Judge David
Callahan. who acted as secretary. should have
illustrated the feeling Of Connecticut Democrats
toward Bryan and the Chicago platform by his
celebrated fable of the dogs. wherein he relates
that two dogs travelling together came to a
drugstore, the proprietor of which. annoyed by
the attentions paid to his own dog by straSglers.
had taken the precaulon 10 attach TO him
sponge saturated with ammonia. The younger
Of the two travellers seeking acquaintance with
the stranger was suddenly keclcd over on the
sidewalk The other, being curious as to the
cause of his associates discontinue. proceeded
to investigate and similarly thrown on his
back Upon recovering CONSCIOUSNESS the elder
observed 10 the younger: "Who in thunder *
that little dog. anyhow" To which the other
answered. IL haven't the slightest idea !
never saw him before. But he's got the most
ridiculous smell abou; him that ever struck.
The Judge might have promoted mirth by the
anecdotc and momentarily raised the spirits Of
the Convention. As 1t was, the Convention made
lots of fun for other folks without having any
fun itself