Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1895-09-05

Let Us All Laugh.
He walked the stream the livelong day,
With rod and reel and ny.
And then went home and reveled In
One long, luxuriant lie.
Philadelphia Record.
"This reminds me Of my school days"
remarked Fogg. as he dropped into his
new easy chair. Gained seat You
now."-Boston Transcript
Hell love the country, where every
thing SO smacks Of freshness. She
That may be, but freshness can gain
no smacks here.-Adams Freeman.
The Younger one-I wonder II will
lose my looks, too, when get to your
age? The Elder One-You would DO
lucky If you did.-Washington Star.
Thomas-Have they named the twins
over at your house yet? John-Yep;
pa called them Thunder and Lightning
as soon rs he heard about them
Truth.
Van Twerp-I hear your daughter
has reached high place in the theatre
cal profession. Won Swipe-Yes; she's
singing on a roof garden.-Brooklyn
Eagle.
How do you stand on this here mon
ey question, Major" II don't stand at
all, sir! Moneys so scarce that when
1 strike dollar it jest keels me over!'
Life.
Weston-Do you think young man
can safely marry on $40 a week? Eas-
ton-Well, that depends on how much
the girls father is worth.-SOmervills
Journal.
"Say. guide, what does that memoir
ial stone commemorate" 81 put
there. 1t it upon that spot where a
tourist once gave FIVE marks."-Flie-
gende Batter.
Carry-Why was 1t, l wonder, my
poor husband never said anything to
me about remarrying? Anna-Proba-
bly, you were not the person he wanted
to warn.-Life.
Justice-What is the charge against
this prisoner? Ofiicer-Having an infer
nal machine in his possession. yer hon.
or. Justice-Anarchist or bicyclist?-
Brooklyn Life.
In popping the question he did prefer
To do 1t In q manner firm and steady
He did not 60 on his knees to her
For she was on his knees already.
Life.
Teacher-If your father was to hear
Of your conduct 1t would make his hair
turn gray. Bobhy-I beg your pardon,
sir, my father hasn't any hair left
The State.
Harry-Come, Johnny. let's play
horse. Johnny-Oh, you're behind the
times; we don't play boss any more. II
you want to play bicycle. I'm with yer.
Boston Transcript.
Summer Resorter-And Is everything
on your farm nice and fresh? Farmer
Nice and fresh? guess you'd think
SO If you'd see some of our cityboard.
ers.-Boston Traveller. so,,9s, sS'A.
"Did you receive an affectonate let
ter from Bar Harbor from your wife?"
"Yes, but she didn't waste any words.
She merely wrote, Love! Send me
! 500! Boston Gazette.
Hobson-I hear CholIy Sappy is out
of his mind, poor fellow. Costique-I
think he is rather to be congratulated.
He must have been frightfully cramped
in philadelphia Record.
Young Lady ION the grand standD-
The umpire calls foul, but I don't
even see a feather. Her Esc0rt-But
you must remember that this Is pick
ed nine.-Sacred Heart Review.
81 don't know how 1t IS" said Adolf.
plus; "but there Is always something or
other running through my mind" "How
Fortunate" replied Kate. shat 1t isn't
4 train Of thought"-Boston Trans
| ,ript.
II see they've nominated Coxey fur
/, Governor Of Ohio" said one ex-Com.
monwealer. "Yes," replied another.
"But we won't have no such walkOver
ez we had last ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Star.
Cholly Chumpey-I see that earrings
are coming into fashion again. Have
your ears ever been bored? Miss Caus-
tic-What question:! Haven't often
listened to your twaddle?-Syracus
Post.
Yabsley-Did you carry out your
threat of telling Samuelson what you
thought Of him? Mudge-No. The
telephone girl said she positively could
not stand such Observation-Disclosures
Journal.
Princely-Did you see Jaberson last
night spending money Ike a princei
Like a prince? He blew In about 81.
Do you call that like q prince?" "Sure.
The money was his wife,s."-Indian-
apolis Tribune.
"Ah," said the jovial friend of the
man with the valise, "gsing for little
rest are you" ''No," was the reply,
with hurried glance at tine time table.
I'm going away on my vacation
Washington Star.
I'VE must n.y." said Murat to Napo-
leon on one occasion when the battle
had gone sorely against them. "It n
impossible" replied the Latter. "Ths
enemy has destroyed both wings of the
army."-Harper's Bazaar. - -.
Cleff-They tell me pour daughter
julia ID quite singer. Has she n good
voice? Is her method BtafY-Can.t
say SO much about her toice. but her
methed IL superb She meyer sings
Whon II an, NJ h1xx~c m ~ e..