Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1895-06-13
OUR BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND UOs
INGS HERE AND THERE.
Jokes and IokeIets that Are Supposc@
to Have Been Recently Born-SaynmxS
and Doings that Are Odd. Curious anu
J.auphab1e-The Weeks Humor.
Let Us All Laugh.

Let Us All Laugh.
Breathes there a man with soul so dead
Who Joys not when the peanuts shed
Their husks, and Quaffs beneath thM
shade
The ruby tinted lemonade?
Washington Star.
"Algy and May have tabooed ham,
! mocks." ''Why?" lone was the cause
| of their first falling out."-Harlem fASfeA
Wiggles-I have just one cigar here
| You haven't any objections, have your
! WaSgles-Not if / smoke it-Somervfils
| Journal.
"Now, Charles, let us make list oe
your debts lone moment, dear uR~
Gle. till l have filed up your inkstand~
-Fliegende Blaetter.
Johnny-Mamma, l can count all tina
way up to twelve. Mamma-And whan
comes after twelve, Johnny? Johnny
-Recess.-Harper's Round Table.
He'd just as lief be hung for ~
sheep as lamb. She-Weli, YOUTH
be hung for neither; you'll be hung for
a calf or nothing.--Yonkers Statesman
Jimmy-Timmy Grogan is talkin' OF
gittin' him a bicycle. Mickey-Him2
He amt got de price for de wind Voc
goes in de tires.-IndianapoliS Journal
Attorney-You say, when you asked
him for the money, he used blasphe-
NOUS language? Riley did not, soE.
l said he swore at me like a trooper
Harper's Bazaar.
Simpson-How do you know that your
rival and her father will fall out and
fight? Jimpson (gleefully)-They'v
| both Joined the same church choir
Tammany Times.
Jones-I hear that you have good
organ at your lodgings. Do you Know
how many stops it has? She-Onsy
about three a day, and those are nSn
long ones.-Boston Globe.
Mr.. Busy Body-If you hang those
turkeys by the feet you will keep theaA
longer Mr.. Butcher Business-lfiaf
amt what I'm trying to do. I want
to sell em.--Harlem Life.
Mr. Droppin--Is Mr.. Bate in to-dayg
Mr.. Bates Partner-No, sir; he's DOWN
at the Rangleys Mr.. Droppin-Ahs
Catching fish? Mr.. BIS Pho, sars
Standardization Courier.
Guest-I would like a hice rouHG
steak, rare done, and some fresh fried
potatoes Waiter lin stentorian voaGeS
Carnage in the skillet! Fried PingreeS
on the side!-Chicago Tribune.
She-The man / marry must be only
little lower than the angels" Hs
Suddenly hopping)--Here l am ON my
knees little lower than one of them
He got her.--New York Weekly.
81 will work night and day to make
YOU happy" he said. NO." she ars-
swered thoughtfully, don't do that
Just work during the day and stay as
home at night "-Washington Star
Mrs. Poorman-This money question:
seems to be getting very bitter ReSw
do YOU feel about it, dear? Mr.. Poor
man-Bad enough. Really, I'm ain
broke up.-Cleveland Plain Dealer
'"There doesn't seem to be anything
selfish about that man Pingree,' said
Uncle Allen Sparks. 'In that potato
patch scheme of his he has let every
body in on the ground or."-Chicag0
| Tribune.
Hoax-What I object to in your
boarding house is the lack Of tone.
Joax-Iuh. ] guess you haven't heard
the girl in the next room singing When
| Summer Comes Again. "-Phlladelphi1
Record.
he hn Syfn
young ladies playing that duet ON tina
piano! Herr Strawitzki-One IS tnEs
daughter of the hostess. Mrs. Malaprop
And, pray, who is her accomplish
Eulenspiegel.
''Georgy, DEAR" said the loving moth
er, I'm very proud nothing has been
| brought up against you this term OF
| school George--So'm 1! Wisht
nuthin'd been brought down agin mex
| Cleveland Plaindealer.
Mrs. Hammand-M Mrs Hashcroft haa
! Dragged again to-day about Keeping
her boarders SO long. Mrs. ForaWeek
She doesn't keep them long She
keeps them SO thin they look longer
than they actually are.-IndianapOliS
Journal.
The Salesman (holding up a vellum-
bound brochure)-The price OF the
book is SO. Mrs. Embellishments
You can't impose upon me in that way
Why, minute ago you offered me a
book Of twice the size for $1-50--Chi-
cago Record.
At the table-"Do you know, Am-
aryllis" asked the Cheerful Idiot, why
the letter s is like the presentation oG
cigar to colored gentlemanY The
waiter girl gave 1t up. II will tell you.
ANGELINA continued the Cheerful Idiot.