News and citizen. [volume] (Morrisville, Vt. ;) 1881-current, 1895-08-08

time prevent the depredations of
such characters as he was just then
personating.
In beseching tone he explained that
he was only joking, and begged for
release. But the voice of his TAILOR
on the other side of the door in
formed him that she did not admire
that sort of a Joke, and that she
should leave him there for her hus-
band to settle with when he came
home. In spite of the hopelessness
of the situation the captive gave a
faint sigh of relief at this assurance.
At least she wasn't going to raise a
commotion and call in the neighbors.
Of course the game was up and he
should doubtless have to own up the
whole scheme through that Internal
door, but there was no hurry about
it. Fully two hours must elapse be-
fore she could expect the valiant hus-
band, of whom she had made men,
ton, and, in the meantime, he would
patch up as plausible a story as pos
sible out of the scant materials at
his command. If only he had been
brilliant enough to tell Jack to hap
pen round to the house on some pre-
text or other, in case he didn't turn
up within a certain time there might
have been chance of crawling out
of the scrape even yet. However, it
was too late to think of that now, and
with a groan of misery he settled
himself to the composition of his hui
initiating confession. He could hear
Marjorie moving about occasionally;
she even sat down to the piano and
played "Ta-ra-ra-boom-de. ay," with
the loud pedal down. Then there was
a long period of absolute stiffness,
and Mr.. Hazleton was just preparing
to shout the opening remarks of his
carefully-made-up story, when he was
startled by the loud ringing of the
door bell.
"Callers! by the lord Harry and
she'll tell them she's got tramp
Gagged up here" groaned the panic
stricken captive. "Say, Marjorie, "
he called desperately.
But it was too late. There was a
sound of voices, followed by heavy
footsteps moving rapidly in his di-
rection, and then Marjorie's clear
tone broke ominously on his listen
ing ear
"Well, | thought at first | would
wait for Mr.. Hazleton and then l was
afraid he would insist on trying to
manage the awful creature himself,
so l decided to send for YOU"
The next instant the door was
throw open and two burly policemen
stood before him. Mr.. Hazleton
could never quite remember the
events which Immediately followed.
He knew he was dragged from his
lair to the front door, where the pa.
troll wagon stood waiting, while all
attempts at explanation were silenced
by threats of handouts and the ap-
plication of the billy. Into this hu,
initiating vehicle he was unceremoni-
ously assisted, and with blue-coat-
ed guardian on either side, driven
rapidly to police headquarters, where
he was landed in a cell and left in
solitude to ponder the situation.
Some time afterward, hours or days,
he had no idea which, his reflections
were broken in upon by the entrance
OF Jack and the captain of the police.
This latter functionary accepted OF
Mr.. Vance box of sugars, listened
with an air of ill-concealed amuse-
ment to the explanations, and prom
Used to hush the affair up as far as
possible and keep it out of the pa
pers. These preliminaries over the
two conspirators sneaked through
the side streets in the darkness to
Jacks Office, where the process OF
disrobing began, with the absence OF
the hilarity which had reigned a few
hours before. Mr.. Vance himself
seemed nervous and uneasy. With
saint-like meekness he accepted all
his friends invectives for leading him
into such an idiotic performance,
showing no resentment whatever as
Toms wrath waxed hotter and hot.
ter, and not once lifting his voice
in his own behalf. In the midst of an
emphatic TRADE there came a knock
at the outer door and u note was
handed in for Mr.. Thomas Hazleton.
Tearing open the envelope Tom ran
his eye quickly over the contents,
then striding across the room he
clutched the trembling Jack by the
shoulder.
"You Internal blabbing IDIOT" he
shouted, "iust read that"
And this is what Mr.. Vance read
Ny BELOVED HUsBAND:-After you are
once more clothed in your own habiliments,
and have otherwise removed the traces OF
your highly successful afternoons masquer.
ade, should advise you to come home and
get square meal. i will give you pie. And
| Tom, dear, you know, in business matters
never considered myself competent to offer
suggestions, but in regard to this little affair
| would like to give you bit of advice The
next time you undertake to hoodwink me-
don't take married man for a 'conhdant
| You know Jessie Vance is q particular friend
of mine. Yours forever,
MARJORIE.
"Ohl Tom, kick me if you want to,
groaned the culprit, but you know |
sometimes talk in my sleep. | had
this thing on my brain last night,
and | must have babbled just enough
to put my wife on the scent. Oh
course she routed me up on the spot,
and there was no peace till she had
wormed the whole thing out of me.