Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1895-02-21

-Edftor-'S Somehow or other I don't
see the sense of this thing Poet-"Mv
dear SIT, that's poetry. Atlanta Consti-
tuition. ooi'' -
Where to Tell It'll tell you tale
mat is positively hair-raising in - For
Jup1ters sake tell it to Gibson-he's
bald-headed. '-Tid-Bits.
that stealing a cat is not larceny was was
DOUBTLESS influenced by the probabili1
tn ina the cat would come back. Kansas
City Journal ''''
(which do you think is correct? ''
asked the studious young woman. "I
would rather go home or I had rather
% homeT" Neither replied Cholly
Nairgo., I'D rather stay here. WASH
ington Star.
-Carleton-"H did you enjoy your
self at Mrs. Hamilton's last night?''
oynicus- First rate, there wasn't a song
or recitation sprung on us during the en-
tire evening. "-Tid-Bits,
AT the Fortune Teller's THAT is a
very dark future you predict for me,
madame" why, sir, what could Won
expect for sixpence? Pay me shilling,
and I'll see what [ can do for you.''-
LIE Moniteur Litteraire.
The foxy boy applied for a Job. DO
you want boy? he asked Of the mag
cap in hand. Nobody wants a boy"
replied the magnate, cycling him sharply.
DO you need q boy?'' asked the appii.
cant. nowise abashed. Nobody needs a
boy" came the discouraging reply. The
boy stuck. his cap on the back of his
head well, say, mister" he inquired,
do you have to have boy?' The mag
do" he said, land / guess you're about
what we want. Detroit Free Press.
81 have rented my room to q student
who pays his rent regularly, studies all
day, and never goes to the tavern"
"Oh. get out, he's no student, File
gende Blaetter.
Xavier Ter 1 5!a5o say, doctor doctor, tell me
confidential tone) 1.-THE doctors fees.
People don't call physician for cold.'
Buffalo Courier.
AT a royal dinner the male guests new
er remain behind for wine and walnuts.
When the Queen rises and leaves the
room she is followed by everyone at the
table, and the banquet is ended.
Il want to introduce you to Mrs.
women you know" "Ah. Which kind
the woman with a past or the one with
future ?"-Indianapolis Journal.
If sleep knits up the travelled sleeve
of care. sleep must have it's hands full
when it begins operations on the sleeve
selves-Boston Transcript.
Tommy-''May | have some bread and
sugar. mamma?' Mamma-'Why do
you always want bread and sugar, and
never bread and butter?" Tommy-s"Be-
cause, mamma, sugars only worth
cents a pound, and buffers about 4O. -
| Hampers Bazaar
They tell OF a certain Mrs Maaprop
that she recently remarked that she and
her family had spent so much time in
Paris that they all felt like Parasites
New York Mail and Express.
-GirlI'I told Jack we must be
strangers henceforth.'' Another Girl
Did he fall j, on his knees ia and In implofSs
Very well,' and then tried to firt with
me"-Detroit Tribune.
-Maud-"They ought not to allow
marriages between cousins" Marie
why not?" Maud-'Because if you
marry your cousin your own children
are scarcely related to you: They are
only your second cousins.
-Bobby-"Paw, why do you always
when you go a-fishing?" Paw-..It makes
the fish look larger, my son. There, run
g''-Syracuse Post.
| -Pertly- "There is one thing I have to
say in favor of the wind when it whistles
| Dullhead-"What's that? Pertly-"lt
never whistles popular airs. Harper s
Bazaar.
&C. E. S.''-"Who wrote the line,
There's music in all things?" byron.
| But that was before the days of the anna
| teur cornetist and the clearinghouse
piano. ATLANTA Constitution.
-Plumson-''I'll be mighty glad when
| we get through the Nineteenth century,
! Rayson-''Why?" Plumson-"By that
| time writer's will be obliged to give fin de
steele a much-needed rest. Boston News.
When Sophie Lyons, the noted shop
litter. was arrested in st. Louis, a much
thumbed copy of 'Trilby" was found in
her possession. This will not be used
against her at the trial.-New York
| World
OH would I were a boy again,
| For then I'd have the right
TO thrash those youngsters who pelt me
With snowballs every night.
-Whimsicus-"I always knew that
thirteen was an unlucky number, Jelil-
Gus gave an awfully swell dinner the 9th
err night. and there were just thirteen at
table" Flimsicus-"Well. what hap
nenedy' Whimsicus-"What happened
WHY. wasn't invited!'-Life
-"Wait till women go to Congress, she
cried, as she warmed up to her lecture
"Oh, / can't said a man in the back
row. I'm not an immortal. '-ttarper
Bazaar
How could you conscientiously tell
Miss Elder that she is the only woman
Won ever loyed?'' 1T is a fact. Com.
barred to her, the Others were mere girls
Boston Budget.
$50 Rusher has got a job at last,
oh? 1 wonder if it is that one with the
sleepiny-car company" Il guess not. AT
least he told me had struck eomforta-
hle berth" Buffalo Courier.
Hit sut'ny am s'prizin'.' said Uncle
Eben, ito see how much mo, some OF OF
NV neighbors knows bout r1ianin dc
rnv'ment dan dey does bout runnin'
dah fahms. "-Washington Star.
-Dinks-" Blamed if I ever CO. could dn nn-
derstand just why they call EN- once
holders Danks-''Humph! It's easy
enough to see that you never tried ;. to
got an office away from one of EN-. =
Buffalo Courier.
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