New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1895-08-04
THE TALK or THE DAY.

Of J. Cooley OF Hornellsvle. failed to meet his ex-
pectatons. but he is as sargune as ever OF ult-
mate success
II thought you going TO learn 10 love me-"
he sighed. , .,,,. or ma
pose taking that matter up just as soon as ZEE
meat pies and pl.ow-shams ies'-,Deu-Ii
Tribune
A Japanese paper ascr.bes the following 10 IA
Hung Chang the great Ch!naman; Ii was looking
at some photographs What is this?" he asked,
surveying one cur.ously. That Is an American
lady in ball toilet" Poor thing" ne answered.
.she must have fallen into deep disgrace, as she
seems to have lost almost much Of her ward
robe L.
Has my wife been in here he ASKED ss .u..,.a
niedium-szed woman In boomers? suggested
the clerk
Very determined ar?'
Well woman OF that description was in here
a little while ago. she seemed 10 know just what
she wanted, and she bought it without botherins
the clerks. and went. right out
NO. that wasn't Mar.a."-tJudge
Editor to Colleague Ghey were discussing the
work OF one OF the reporters)-But you should make
some allowances: he Is a gray bearded man.
Colleague-Tha, is the trouble. The gray matter
is in the wrong place.
TOLD YOU so.
l shrk trials a man may meet
While journey.ng on this earthly sphere
can eat my grapes. though sour or sweet,
And take my chances without a fear;
| dread not povertys presence drear,
| Will face misfortune's cruelest bow;
But | shrink and cover when comes anear
The terrible prophet, "l-told-you-so
can bow to the fate that brings defeat
Ard smile at the worlds unfeeling jeer
But satans SEX would ra, hsr S erect smear
TSan h have 70 him ms prae in my tortured ear
TIL; wordy reasons | sadly know.
That my wounds like jagged spear.
The terrible prophet. "i-told-you-so'
vain
When see my brave schemes disappear.
But long 70 To-. fee .I to SAFE safe re sss
HOW he had known It FOR half year
He felt it would happen long ago;
IL all foreseen by this mighty seer.
Truth.
The short skirt and esgngs OF the wheelwoman
are convenient, that they have been adopted By
some women at summer resorts who DO not ride a
wheel. They especially advantageous for tennis
and for walking tours, and many OF the wearers de-
care they will regret having go back TO the
long skirt.
Lots OF men who find the barber-shops closed on
Sunday have discovered that they can shave them
time the Collins law has been repealed The jour
neymen BARRIERS who are responsible for that act
have been working against their own interests
(Bunalo Express.
A remarkable coincidence is noted in the total
sessments in the Sixth Ward OF Brooklyn for last
year and for this. The figures Identical Ns-
S37 7+0. although a number OF changes made In
individual items. The value Of new buildings erected
was $4,000. and these were assessed at sll550o.
Some reductions made in the original lists
and the first total for this year showed an increase
of N2,SoO over 1894 Then twenty-four applications
were made for reductions. and in fifteen cases, tho
assessments lowered. When the total was
again added. the assessors were asonished TO ma
the figures OF last year exactly duplicated TO tho
dollar. At first they thought there must be soma
mistake, but the addition verified
Nast week Miss Edman sued Jakobowski Cor
breach OF promise and won her case with fIW DAM
ages)
o Jakobowski many tears you'll shed. man;
-Gondon Punch.
There has been a marked decrease in the number
OF wfe-beatng In this city since the ne"
Justices OF the Court Of Special Sessions began the
performance OF their duties. 1t was the practice OK
the Tammany Police Justices to deliver mild iec'.
ures to men who beat their wives, but rev brutal
wife-beaters were sent to prison The new Jusuces
have been imposing sentences OF imprisonment !"
all such cases and the result has been sudden de-
crease In the number OF offences. Sentence was
susnended in the case OF one who had struck
n woman ard In a few days the same man was
brought before the Court on complaint OF oeauhs
his wife He was promptly sent to prison tor one
year for wifc-beating and for another year on 'ns
first complaint.
Among the amusing discussions during the iesis,;
auve sesS'o or Escsmba providing for the prompt
slaughter abd dogs The a r ssass sers rep
from one OF the interior counties arose
and with great gravity and dignity SAID n,rossd
% Il because don't see why rabbit dogs should
be killed any quicker than any other kind OF u1ss
teli You when that dog gets on hot tran IN tho
broom sedge and little later you hear ms voice n
ssnd Fainter iii by-snd-by you can Just hear em
,,c hsnchIecSed weller rascal barkin. his eyes
bright and his forehead wrinked with excitement s
meat is your'n for dinner" There was breatn.,ess
silence during this eloquent appeal on behalf OF
others rose up and paid glowing tributes TO m
have Believed that a thing necessary to mans
for the legislature In the state OF Flor.
ida is q frst-class rabbit dog The bill, by-the.wsys
was killed BY . large majority. -lFlortde HtmS|i