The herald., 1895-04-25
SKETCHES FROM THE LIFE OF LINCOLN

rnat she might nave been prevailed on by her
married sister to come without anything con-
corning me ever having been mentioned to
her, and so concluded that If no other oojec-
ton presented itself, would consent to waive
this. All this occurred to me ON hearing of her
arrival in the neighborhood, for, be it remem-
bered, had not yet seen her, except about
three years previous, as above mentioned In
few days we had an interview, and although
had seen her before she did not look as my
imagination had pictured her. l knew she
was oversize but she appeared fair
match for Falstaff. l knew she was called an
"old maid, " and felt no doubt of the truth of
at least half Of the appellation, but now, when
! beheld her, could not for my life avoid
thinking of my mother, and this not from
withered features, for her skin was too full of
fat to permit of its contracting into wrinkles,
but from her want of teeth weather beaten
appearance in general, and from q kind Of no.
ton that ran in my head that nothing could
have commenced at the size of infancy and
reached her present bulk in less than 30 or 40
years. and, in short, was not at all pleased
with her. But what could / do? had told
her sister would take her for better or for
worse, and l made point of honor and con-
science in all things to stick to my word espe-
cially If others had been induced to act on it,
which in this case l had no doubt they had,
for was now fairly convinced that no other
man on earth would have her, and hence the
conclusion that they were bent on holding me
to my bargain. "Well," thought l. 81 have
said it, and, be the consequences what they
may, it shall not be my fault If fail to do it,"
At once determined to consider her my wife,
and, this done, all my powers of discovery
were put to work in search Of PROJECTIONS in
her which might be fairly set off against her
defects. tried to imagine her handsome,
which, but for her unfortunate corpulency, was
actually true. Exclusive of this, no woman
hat a fit,nr 20 7 oil
tried to convince myself that the mind was
much more to be valued than the person, and
in this she was not inferior, as could discov
er, to any with whom had been acquainted.
Shortly after this, without coming to any
positive understanding with her, set out for
Vandalia, when and where you first saw me-
During my stay there I had letters from her
which did not change my opinion Of either her
intellect or intention, but, on the contrary,
confirmed it in both.
All this while, although / was fixed, "firm as
the surge repelling rock, " in my resolution, !
found l was continually repenting the rash
ness which had led me to make it. Through
lifeI have been in no bondage. either real OF
imaginary, from tho thraldom of which so
much desired to be FREQ. After my return
home saw nothing to change my opinion Of
her i'll any particular. She was the same, and
30 was l. l now spent my time in planning
how might got along through life after my
contemplated change of circumstances should
have taken place, and how might procrasti
nate the evil day for time, which l really
dreaded cS much, perhaps more, than en- Irish
man does the halter.
After all my suffering upon this deeply i'll
teresting subject here am, wholly, unexpect
edly, completely, out of the ''scrape,' and now
l want to know if you guess how l got out
OF 1t, out clear, in every sense Of the term,
no violation Of word, honor or conscience. l
don't believe you can guess, so might as well
tell you at once.
AS the lawyer says, it was done in the man
ner following-to wit After had delayed the
matter as long as | thought + could in honor
do-which, by the way, had brought me round
into the last fall--I concluded / might as we'll
bring it to q contamination without further
delay, and so mustered up my resolution and
made the proposal to her direct; but, shocking
to relate, she answered no. At first | sup
posed she did it through an affectation of mod
esty, which thought but i'll became her under
the peculiar circumstances of her case but ON
my renewal Of the charge / found she repealed
it with greater frmncss than before. l tried
1t again and again, but with the same success,
or rather with the same want Of success. l
finally was forced to give it up, at which very
unexpectedly found myself mortified almost
beyond endurance. I was mortified, it seemed
to me, in II hundred different ways. My vani
ty was deeply wounded by the reelection that
! had been too stupid to discover her inten-
lions, and at the same time never doubling
that l understood them perfectly, and also
that she, whom had taught myself to believe
nobody else would have, had actually rejected
me with all my fancied greatness. And, to cap
the whole, then for the first time began to sus-
pect that was really little in love with her.
But let it all go. III try and outlive it. Others
have been made fools of by tho girls, but this
can never with truth be said of me. l most
emphatically in this instance made n fool of
myself | have now come to the conclusion
never again to think of marrying, and for this
reason-l can never be satisfied with any one
who would be blockhead enough to have me.
When you receive this, write me a long yarn
about something to amuse me. Give my re-
spects to Mr.. Browning Your sincere friend,
te..t 1n A. LINCOLN.
Mrs. o. FL. Browning.
AS before mentioned, Miss Owens was
afterward married and became the mother
of five children. Two of her sons served in
the Confederate army. She died July 4,
1877 Speaking of Mr.. Lincoln n short
time before her death, she referred to him
as "a man with heart full of kindness
and head full of sense. "