The record-union., 1895-06-08
RETAIN HIS AFFECTIONS.
Lady ChesterfielG's Advice to He
Daughter Before Marriage.


Lady Chesterfield's Advice to Her
Daughter Before Marriage.
"Let me see. What is the date of your
marriage?"
Tine 18th, week tomorrow"
Good gracious. Is IL SO soon? Are
you not beginning to be afraid 2"
Afraid of what? love John. and he
loves me-"
"Of course. It's real love match. Pm
glad OF that. Now, as I ought to help
you ell l can, | will tell you how You
may, with luck, keep your Johns af1ec-
tion."
"Oh, do. But don't be 80 dreadfully
grim about it.o
IF you imagine it is subject for
CHEEKY prittle-prattle, perhaps Pa better
not commence"
You know I shall insist upon hearing
all you've got to say; SO go ahead"
The first and most important piece OF
advice l have to give is: Do not be too
much with your husband. However
you may care for his society, tear your
self from it. Don't sicken him straight
of with your personality"
Ppm sure John would never"-
'Ah, all Johns are alike. Then, don't
tell him too much. Don't let out on your
honeymoon the amount of sentiment
which should, if properly managed,
spread over four or five years. No. Treat
him as you would table d'hote acquaint-
ance with regard to your real self and
feelings"
Yes, yes, But afterward? Life isn't
all honeymoon. l expect him to be fond
of me then. What about later on 2"
Later on he will ask you to slacken
your hold on society and to devote your
self to him and to the house. Do not do
either. He would never thank you.
Then you will have to entertain all OF his
| friends, and none of your own"
None of them?"
None. For if you single out one of
them for companionship, you pickle q
rod for your own back. Better retain all
than one. Your house must be we'll man
aged, your dinners perfect, your servants
underpaid-that he may boast of your
cleverness. And you must not mind how
many nights he may pass at the club, for
nome Is merely necessary relaxation
from too much comfort"
How can you! You don't know John,
and do"
"Nonsensei You will meyer really
know John, because, after you are once
married, how'll tell you nothing OF him.
self, and you will find out that all he has
already contided to you was about an
idealized John. No, he may occasionally
retail TO you choice bits of scandal about
himseli.''
''But l shall ask him."
81 wouldn't do that. Pm afraid if you
do not know his life his thoughts, hi 8
ambitions by intuition you will Away
remain III ignorance of them. Take the
little information he is prepared to give
you, and never ask questions. He will
think that marriage completed your edu-
cation; don't disturb that idea. He will
not care for the children when they are
| little; so keep them III the nursery, and
keep them quiet. When they are begin
ming to be companionable he will take
them out and spoil them, and make them
| tiresome and abominable."
Il should not allow it,"
sit won't do for you to complain.
| Never complain of anything. On the
other hand, never encourage anything or
anybody. Boomerangs arefthe rule, and
not the exception, in married life. Thus:
Do not praise The woman John most al
mires; that is insincerity. Do not blame
her; that is jealousy. Do not ignore her;
that is temper. Above all, never talk
earnestly upon the necessary details of
everyday life; that is making scene!"
ut all seems very complicated"
ut is well you should know it. Then
let his mother look into his wardrobe
whenever she will, and let her whisper
her tavorite recipe for bouillon to the
cook on the kitchen stairs. And do not
you forget to order it next day."
"Ab, alb, ali | should.n
SAY your best things at break fast, that
he may retail them at dinner. Don't let
your laugh at the fiftieth repetition of his
worst story grow too fiat. Be the best
and most attentive of mothers. Don't
neglect your husband for your children.
Do not go to the dances to which he OBJ
jects. DO not stop at home and NOPE.
Dress exceptionally well. Have no dress
makers bills. Do not go to Sandown with
! Captain Chose. Be seen about, amuse
yourself like other women. Never mem
tian the words rent tax tailor or
butcher. Put all summonses silently on
his desk. Do not laugh. a married wo-
man should be serious. Do not cry.
Other women never cry. And never
frown. The frown of one day will make
John forget the 364 upon which you have
smiled"
do stop. l can never become such a
mass of contradictions"
Then you cannot be happy."-Pall
Mall Gazette.