Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-05-23
PlTH AND POINT.


We are often able because We thin
We are able. Hawes
-.sShe understands man perfectly.
:sShe ought to after tending sodA
fountain three seasons - Detroit
Tribune
oakley-.'So you like . yacht with
q center-board?" Soakley-ssI like one
better with well-stocked sideboard-
Philadelphia Chronicle.
Man may be happy il he VIII.
Know then. each mortal is an actuat
Jove; can brew what weather he shall
most approve, of wind, or calm. or foul.
or fair.-John Wolcott-
The Character Of It-Manager--
''What is the character Of the play you
have written?" Playwright = Very
bad. made it to meet the taste Of the
times.n-Detroit Free Press.
How charming is divine philoso-
ply! Not harsh and grabbed. as dull
fools suppose, but musical as is Appol-
los Lutte. And a perpetual feast OF
nectared sweets, where no crude sur
felt reigns.-Milton.
-"What a quiet little body she is!~
said the visitor. eyes" answered tho
proud father, gazing fondly at his little
girl busy with her mimic housekeep-
ing. 81 don't think she will ever Be
the man her mother s."-Cincinnati
Tribune.
-Smallwort-s.Oldm man GRIPPE. the
chattel-mortgage man, got q needle IN
his hand this morning and the doctors
had to cut it out" FORTHCOMING
strange in that. They would have
had to do the same thing had it been .
nickel. "-Indianapo Journal
Depth. Professor" said the AM.
bilious student, .I am determined TO
gain recognition from the world - .
deep thinker. Could you give me any
advice on how to proceeds" None.
replied the old gentleman. thoughtful.
"; tunless you write in . sub-cellar.
Washington Star.
-Gertie (who has behaved very rude
" to her mamma; to her aunt)-''Aunty
Clara, pray don't go away yeti" Aunt
tflattered)-"I had no idea you were so
fond of me. Gertie." Gertie-'tOh!
Aunty Clara, it isn't that, but mamma
said was to be whipped when you had
gone. "-Dorfbarbier.
-He-sI don't see. Ethel, why It IL
that people think Demosthenes such .
great orator; I'm sure that there are
plenty just as good nowadays" She
''But, my dear, just consider at what
disadvantage the poor man was. hay
ing to speak in Greek. Ann Arb
Wrinkle.
Makes it Credible.-Diablo-" d
inclined to believe that yarn abou(..
Jonah and the whale and not look ups
on it as q fish story" Theolo-"I ann
glad to hear it. Will you tell mo
why?'' Diablo-sBecause Jonah does
not claim that he caught the whale.
he says the whale caught him -
Brooklyn Life.
A Natural Conclusion.-A small
Boston girl. who was an unnoticed
listener the other day, suddenly piped
up with: Say, mamma, is everybody
wicked?' "Why, no, my child. OF
course not" answered mamma. "Why
do you ask such question rs that?''
because you haven't said . nice thing
about anyone to-day" The rest was
silence.-Boston Herald.
After the Defa1cation.- Presf-
dent-"No. really, I can not say thet
there is anyone against whom we en-
bring a charge. But there Is Add
ton, come to think of it; shave -
ways been more or less suspicious II
him" Police Ofacer-"But I dome
know as care to see Adderton. Isn't
there somebody about the place in
whom you have always had the most
implicit confidence and whom you
have always trusted?" 'Yes?" Well.
that's the man want to see."-Bostop
Transcript.