Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1895-10-06

he had returned from a single days abb
sence. Never a word said he concern
ing his trip or the reasons therefor.
Nothing was heard or seen Of any i'm
ported stock, hence all local theories
were abandoned.
It is not etiquette among cOwmen to
! inquire as to what a man has done and
why he did it. Voluntary statement
and explanation must be patiently
! awaited. Consequently curiosity was
rampant and unappeased among the
! followers of the running W." that be-
ing the Colonels brand, until I came
out there to enjoy few days outing.
l am not bound by the stockmen's code
of etiquette. so l asked the Colonel
where he had been and what were his
experiences. The Colonel, ignoring the
breach as coming from a man beyond
the pale, whose shortcomings were to
be overlooked, took a chair and gave
me the whole story. This is how he
told it,
Il had sold my beeves at Chicago and
got my money. Ferguson, Of the T
BAR was there and had sold his, too,
but he wanted to stay over a day to do
some trading. l staid SOS we would
both go home together. Now, me and
him had been hearing long time about
these here theatre shows but neither Of
us had ever seen one. So we picked on
place to go, and that night we went.
I expect l amt telling you anything you
/ don't already know about for you paper
! fellers stick your noses into everything.
When l saw this show l kn0wed that
though I'd been living a long time I'd
been missing heap. We got into the
| purtiest house l ever seen. We sat
down on velvet chairs while a hundred
J fiddlers fiddled. I didn't catch on eX-
actly what the show was about, but
there was lots Of singing and dancing
and purity pictures. The big boss bull
Of the herd was a teller named Sinbad.
! He wasn't no such man as his name
says, and he was a good man to tie to.
| There was about a hundred mighty
passable looking gals there, and Sin
| married every burned one Of 'em he
wanted to. That teller, too, got into a
country where there was hard money
! laying all round like gravel in dry
! creek bed, He took some, you bet.
| When the show was done me and Fer
| guson came back to the hotel, and we
was so full of it we had to sit down in
the Office and talk it over 1t had sure
! hit Ferguson right, just like it had done
! me. A teller heard us talking-a little
puny piece of a cuss, who looked like
he'd been put up out of leavings after
man had been built. He put in that
! the show was a good show, but it wasn't
nothing to what they had in New York
When the feller left says 1 to Fergu-
SON
If there's anything that beats that
anywheres Pm a-gOing right to the
place where it is
I'm sure with YOU said Ferguson.
Next day him and me left for New
! York We got to New York and asked
the hotel clerk where the best show
was. He said there was lots of shows,
and we'd better go to see the 'Gayety
Gals This name hit us, and we went.
| Sure enough, though I wouldn't have
! believed it, the house was a little more
! tOnier than the one we'd seen. There
was more fiddlers and more kinds of fid-
dlers. The gals was a little more pass
| ADLER than Sinbad's wimmen, and
Lord how they did dance. 1t was the
| most pleasureful, aggravating thing to
| look at 1 ever seen! When it comes to
J giving shows, New York sure had bit
/ the bulge on Chicago. Not much, but
! just enough so you see there was bet
terment.
''The next morning Ferguson got a
paper, and the first thing he reads about
this show we'd been to. The paper had
it that the show was good, but it was in
feriOr to the London performance. Fer
guson folded up the paper, and says he,
Pm going there
THAT was just how we went to En-
gland. We was seven days getting
there. I never was so sick since l was
a yearling and chawed my first chaw of
! tobacco. 1t didn't taste good, so l took
/ and put the tobacco in between two
slices Of gingerbread SOS to kill the fla
vOr I swallowed the whole mess.
/ When I was lying fiat on my stomach,
a-going in my bunk in that internal
! pitching boat, all Of them old feelings
came to me. There wasn't but one
comfort-Ferguso was sicker'n me.
/ He couldn't remember nothing at all.
If it hadn't been for seeing that show
ahead of us, we'd have got on the first
boat we'd met and come back again.
''The show we went to was about a
young teller named Dick Wilmington.
Dick was a gal, trying to pass for boy,
but we was on her. She had big tom
cat that follered her around. There
was more gals than the other shows
had. The scenery laid over them 9TH
ers way yOnder, and the stage was big
enough to round up 800 head on. The
houses wasn't fixed so much ornamen-
tai. but was bigger than them we'd been
in. I had no idea such show could
be had anywheres.
"The next day what We do but meet
I'D with a young Teller from America.
We drank and palavered around with
him and told him what we'd seen. He
sorter laughed. and told us when it
comes to shows, not London nor no
Mace was in it with Paree, over in
| France. I wasn't going back and not
see a show that was anywheres, II 1t
was better'n what we'd seen, and l said
So
"Paree goes said Ferguson.
eve crossed over to France on the
nastiest, toughest streak of water we'd
come to vet. We was two mighty sick
men when we got to shore. We hadn't
morn got braced up good when we was
in Paree and in a hotel.
"Paree is a nice town and a clean town
but we couldn't find drop of decent
whisky in the whole of it. We couldn't
make out the talk everybody was talk
ing. and was feeling right lost, when