The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1895-11-24

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was all one now required to know,
are you Income Tax or Stamps?"
Neither. although my duty makes
! me familiar with every department II
the civil service. l have the honor to
/ be-" and he cleared his throat with
Schedule Office"
Our work" he explained to me, 'ls
/ very important, and in fact
vital TO the administration of affairs.
The efficiency of practical government
{ depends on the accuracy of the forms
issued and every one is composed III
our Office
No, that is a common mistake" in
reply 10 my shallow remark: 1.-The de-
partments do not show up their own
forms, and in fact they are not fit for
such Wcik. They send us a memoran-
dunn of What their officials wish to
ask, and we put it into shape.
1t requires long experience and, I
may say, some ability to COM
pose a really creditable schedule, one
that Will bring out every point clearly
and exhanstively-in fact, l have VEN
tuled to call it a science"-here Mr..
Perkins allowed himself to smile--"and
it might he defined Schedulology.
Yes. to see d double sheet of fools
cap divided up into some twenty-four
compartments each with question
and a blank space for the answer, is
pleasing 10 the eye, very pleasing in
deed
What annoys one and Mr.. Per-
kins became quite irritable, lis to eX-
anime a schedule after it has been
filed and to discover how it has been
misused-sinply nlangled.
1T is not the public simply who are
to blame; they are, of course quite
hopeless. and have an insane desire to
write their names all over the paper.
with family details; but members of the
Civil Service abuse the most admira-
hle forms that ever came out OF our
office
Numerous? Yes, naturally so; and
as governmental machinery turns on
shedules they will increase every year.
Could You guess, now, the number of
different schedules under our charger"
Several hundred perhaps"
Mr.. Perkins smiled with much com-
placency. Sixteen thousand four hun
dred and four, besides temporary ones
that are only used in emergencies One
department has now reached 1902; it
has been admirably organized. and it's
secretary could tell you the subject of
every form.
We'll, 1T does not become me to
boast, but l have had the honor of
contributing 220 myself. and have COM
posed IL more that have not yet been
accepted.
well, yes he admitted with much
modesty, L have kept copies of the
original drafts" and he showed me
bound volume of his works.
AN author? 1t is very good of you
to say So" and Mr.. Perkans seemed
much pleased with the idea, twice
smiling to himself during the evening,
and saying as we parted, It's my
good fortune to have large and per-
manent circulation
All November Mr.. Perkins was en-
gagged with what he hoped would be
one of his greatest successes.
It's sanitation schedule for the
education department and is, l dare
say, nearly perfect. 1t has So questions
on every point, from temperature to
drains, and will present a complete
view of the physical condition of pri-
mary schools.
what a fight l have had with our
Head to get it through-eight drafts,
each one costing three days labor-but
now he has passed it.
Perkins, he said, this is the most
exhaustive schedule you have ever
drawn up, and I'm proud it's come
through the hands Of the drafting sub
1
as Head of the publishing sub-depart-
ment is very doubtful
DO you mean that the same man
would approve your paper in one de-
partment today and
Quite so. It's a little difficult for an
outsider to appreciate the perfect order,
perhaps l might say symmetry, of the
civil service" and Mr. Perkins spoke
with tone of condescension as to
child. The Head goes himself to the
one sub-department in the morning and
to the other in the afternoon, and he
acts with absolute impartiality.
why. sir'-Mr. Perkins began to
warm and grow enthusiastic-'I have
received a letter from the other SUBJ
department, severely criticising a draft
he had highly commended in ours two
days before. and L saw his hand in the
letter-distinctly an able review, too,
very able Indeed.
Very well put, Perkins, he said to
me himself; they've found the weak
points; we must send an amended
draft and so we did. and got a very
satisfactory reply. 1t was a schedule
about swine fever 972 in the depart
ment of agriculture. 1 have had the
pleasure of reading it in public circula-
ton when on my holidays"
Does your Head sign the letters adj
dressed to himself?''
Certainly; letters between depart
ments are always signed by the chief
officer" Mr.. Perkins seemed to have |
found another illustration of public ig-
norance, and recognized his duty as |
of officialism. at would af- |
ford me much pleasure to give you any
information regarding our excellent |
system, which has been slowly built up
and will repay study; but you will ex-
cuse me this evening, as I am indis-
posed-a tendency to shiver which an
noyed me in the office today"
Next morning L rose half an hour
late, as Mr.. Perkins did not take his
bath, and was not surprised when Mrs.
Holmes came to my room, overlooking
with concern and disconnected speech.
les that regular in is ways, that /
when 'Annah Marian says Is waters |
at lis door at o'clock, I w'nt up that
'urried that I couldn't speak; and l |
ears him speaking to 'isself, which is
not what you would expect of him, he |
being the quietest gentleman as ever"
SIS Mr.. Perkins i'll, do you mean?"
for Mrs. Holmes seemed now in fair |
breath, and was always given to COM
parative reviews.
$50 1 knocks and says, Mr.. Perkins, |
'ow are you feeling?' and all I could |
ear was temperance it's little as ne
needs of that, for excepting a glass of |
wine at his dinner, and it might be |
something 'ot before going to bed in |
winter.
80 1 goes in resumed Mrs. Holmes,
IAN there e was sitting up in is bed, |
with is face as red as fire, an not |
knowing me from Adam. If it wasn't |
for is 'abits an catching of is |
breath you rwud ave said drink, for e |
says, How often have the drains been
10 ef 81,