The Washington times., 1895-01-20
THOSE AWFUL HUSBANDS.
The. Best of Them Are a Great Trouble to
Their Loving Wives


Their Loving Wives
Men are so hard to please" sighed the
young woman with the huge muf.
''They are indeed" groaned the girl with
the big bunch Of yiolets Glow do I know2
Why, Walter Penandink used to praise my
playing so much that it set me to praetieing
harder than ever; yet that very thing ended
in breaking of our friendship
''But hoB?'
'sThere was a clearinghouse next door to
Us. He came there to live while he wrote his
new book. My piano was on one side of that
party wall, his desk was on the other. ThaE
is ali.
And still the industry of the bee ts held up
to admiration. But all men are Just as bad
there's not a bir OF logic in them. Now. How
ard used to praise my elegant toilets before
we were married, and YET when my dress
makers bill comes in he uses such language
that have to remove my parrot from the
room"
"Humphl And they actually talk as if va
were illogical"
'They do. But what worries ne most is
the fact that Howard will smoke in the
house,
but you probably told him before you
were married that you liked smoke"
What if l did, He might have known that
L only meant in rooms where the carpets and
curtains are not my OWL"
$50 he might"
but that is really nothing to the time Lucy
is having
81 didn't think a woman who has dia-
monds like hers would know what trouble
I is
MY dear, her diamonds have given hsr
1 insomnia already"
Il don't see howl
''She can't sleep If she has them all in the
/ house for fear Of burglars. and she ean't
/ sleep if they are IN the bank, lest the cashier
/ abscond with themn
"Poor thing. Still she can enjoy them all
| day."
tsyery true. But about her troubles. Mau-
rice is always complaining Of and poking
/ fun at her big sleeves, so she took advantage.
/ of the fact TO have her new bail dress mada
/ with no sleeves ar all. 3"
| "Quite logical. I'm sure"
| Wasn't it, She was TO help Mrs. Swell
| style receive the other evening, and she only
kept her husband waiting three-quarters OF
an hour so he would not have time to get
cross Then she came down in her new
gown"
| well was he pIeased?'
''He was not He sent her up stairs to put
on gown with sleeves in it, They got to the
I reception in time TO see the last Of the guests
say good night"
I'VE /. he is hard to please. You've heard
OF Ediths accident, haven't youf"
''Mercy, no; what was it?''
why, 1er HuSDanQ pretenOS 10 Know 20
| much about dress that she depends on him to
! tell her If her toilet is all right II hatters
his vanity and saves her lots OF trouble, too"
"a very nice arrangement"
'Yes. Now Edith has taken to wearing
one OF the new ehgnons-"
81 wish 1 could, but hair IS so cruelty ex-
pensivel''
''Yes. Well, she had to dress in great hasta
for big dinner party the other day. The
husband said he would advise her to place
her flowers little to the left; otherwise she
/ was perfect"
''Well wasn't she ?'
''Not quite During the game course that
horrid Mrs. Flaxen leaned over and whispered
that she had forgotten to pin on her CHG
non"
Good graciousI"
"And there Edith had to sit through SIX
courses with her own hair done up in a knot
the size of a biscuit at the back of her head,
and her lovely new chignon lying on the
dressing table at home"
And after her husband had sworn to love
and protect herl"
''Yes. And she couldn't make him UNDER
stand the enormity of his ofense; he seemed
to think it was joke, and said it was all her
own fault. anyhow"
"How utterly unreasonable. Well il he
keeps going on IN that way there will lust be
divorce in that family some day; that's al. I"
Chicago Tribune.