Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1895-03-23
THE FAT MANS JOKE.
He Was Helped On, hut Not on the
Car.

He Was Helped On, but Not OF the
Car.
Skip lively now! shouted the conductor.
But the fat man on the corner was evi.
IDENTIFY very feeble. The conductor Jumped
of to give him helping hand. but his
strength seemed not sufficient to boost the
passenger aboard. So-for the car was
somewhat behind time-the driver came to
his assistance. Still 1t was quite lift, ana
1t was only with the aid Of a sympathetic
department clerk IN giglamps that the new
fare was finally lifted into the vehicle.
The driver and conductor pushed from be-
hind, while the individual in giglamps held
on to the lapels of the fat mans overcoat
and pulled with might and main.
At length the fat man was showed
through the rear doorway Of the convey
arce and dropped into a seat The arnia-
bly-disposed department clerk wiped the
perspiration from his brow, while the
driver resumed his stool In front and whip
ped up his horses. The conductor gave a
ye a.1a at The bell strap and remarked:
corpse I ever handledw
Fully two minutes had been lost, and
the muttered profanity of the driver was
IN a measure pardonable. The car. under
an impetus given by few lashes bestowed
upon the horses. sped rapidly onward,
while the tat man proceeded to disengagc
himself from his hat. which had been
crushed Gown over his head to some ex-
tent. 1t was observed that his nose was
req perhaps from the biting air. and tina,
cheerful smile irradiated his counte-
nance. Furthermore, he winked pleasantly
twice or thrice at q pretty young woman
who sat opposite. SO that she became ouite
embarrassed, not realizing probably that
such signals. when given by stout gentle
men OF certain age. merely indicate re-
spectful admiration.
And him on the edge of tba oroyar,
thought respectable Irish woman with
market basket. half aloud She sat next
TO the pretty girl and took notice Of those
winks. >o'e
Perhaps ten minutes had passed ana
the car had got eight or nine blocks
further on its journey. when it stopped at
street corner. and the fat man rose to
get out. Without exhibiting the slightest
symptom of his previous decrepitude he
walked out upon the rear pIatfornn-the
conductor being at the moment in the for
ward part OF the vehcle-ald, refusing an
arm profered by the department clerk fn
giglamps. jumped lightly down and of the
steps. The conductor, giving a pull at the
bell rope. and Fastening out just in time
only say:
by gosh.
The fat man, turning and waving a sky
blue umbrella. which he carried. shouted
back:
"oh, forgotr'
Forgot WHAT asked the conductor.
not at all recovered from his Amusement
Il forgot I was SO feeble" replied the
erstwhfle decrepit passenger Then he
added, TIA. ia" and skipped lightly upon
the sidewalk. - a :
Well. I'm dashed" calculated the de-
partment clerk.
Il should say sou said the conductor.
That Teller was just putin up a job on
us. pretendin he was most a corpse. Just
wait till he tries that on me again, and
I'll drop him into a mud puddle"
The car sped onward, but for a while all
the JOY had gone out Of the life of two
human beings. And the driver had not vet
heard of the little game which had trans-
PRED