The daily morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven, Conn.) 1894-1907, 1895-05-30

country house for a vacation and on
coming took the visitor one side, shut
ting all the DOORS and asked do You
brush your teeth?' The visitor admit
ted the fact. "Well," said the girl, 'the
mother and the girls in the country
brushed their teeth. l though 1T mhght
be a notion they had, but If you brush
yours it must be rigiht, and am going
| to brush mine" This visitor writes:
at is only by the strength OF our SYM
pathies that we can be of use to the
poor. The bond is, however, stronger
and more wholesome when ONE Is able
to receive sympathy from them, and
such small services as they wish to OF
fer. If we can draw out AN interest I'm
our own way of life and occupation or
experience from people who never read,
our answers to their questions make
deep impression. The questions may
appear somewhat indlscreet, but they
are prompted not so much from curiosi-
ty as from the eagerness to understand
something of the world outside of their
own. Our ANSWERS may open a window
from dark room into the summer
world of thought and imagination"
| After you have been 1.-THE visiting
l
your poor friends come to visit YOU
Well do we remember the lady who
gave the boys from her poor family a
standing invitation to spend any of
their leisure time at her house and gar
den. In this cultivated home the intel
| lectual mature of the boys developed.
AS they grew older they went to- the
theater only to see Shakespe are's plays,
though they struggled up into the top
gallery like Charles Lamb. When we
first knew this family thirteen years
ago they all ate out of one dish ON the
| floor, Now one of the sons earns $1,70O
a year as a designer and the family
| owns a house in the suburbs
Often the relation becomes quite so
cial between visitor and family At the
conference one day a visitor told OF
family she had befriended for five long
years, where at last there had been con-
siderable improvement in cleanliness
and some members had Joined the Sa-
wings society. Some ONE asked If the
visitor would not keep ON with the fam
fly. ooh, yes, but only visit the farni-
ly socially now" SHE answered. A hap
Ply ripple of laughter went through the
conference, which has grown to be
cheerful as 1t has watched the success
full work of its visitors.
We have now seen how the visitors
impart their own virtues. how they Gull
tivate the intellect, health, industry,
self-dependence THRIFT and the social
natures Of their poor friends.
"In these ways and many others, the
visitor takes up the brotherhood of man
and translated sentiment into living
acts and practice"
If we are anxious TO keep our poor
families from being paupeldzed, to help
them to save, to start them out into
new fields of activity and enjoyment
and we should keep them under our
continued care, Although kind and
considerable, we must be firm and con-
stant. Cancellation and tact are essen |
tial for success i'm our work, and these
can be cultivated I'M us and In our UNI
fortunate friends only by a long person. |
al acquaintance and by frequent con-
sultation ON things of interest, finally |
making a compact of friendship and |
Justice most powerful for good.
The more dtscouraging a family is |
the more courage we summon to help |
them out of their difficulties. Although |
som etines 1t takes a great while to dis |
cover them, encouragement and praise |
of the good points OF a family, and their |
cultivation brings excellent results.
AS soon as the visitor and the family |
know each other we'll enough to have a |
hearty laugh together even If it be at |
the expense of the family, lit is a great |
help. A visitor found it difficult to get |
ON confidential terms with one of her |
families until they happened to be talk |
ing about the chi1dren's birthdays, |
when she was surprised to find they all |
four came ON holidays Westinghouse |
birthday, Fourth Of Judy, Christmas |
and Thanksgiving; upon further anqui-
ny the woman said she always called 1
the holyday of the month in which
each child was born the birthday, as it l
was easier to remember. Then the wo-
man and the visitor had a laugh togeth-
err over what would have happened if
one of the children had been born in
October or amy other month when there
is no holiday.
Constant attention is given to make
the friendly visitor efficient and pro-
gressive. If the family moves from
our district the visitor is asked to con-
tinue his friendly relations except in 1
rare instances. For if amy charity
work is worth doing at all 1t is worth
following up to see the results, that we
may learn what plans it is wise to try
again in like cases. Cooperation with
relief societies is often made secure for
special families If we can quote practi-
cal results of long standing In similar
cases. We try to keep growing, even If
we have to- learn sometimes by failures
1.-THE continued care of families" Of
ten leads to the adoption of new princi-
pies in our work. For instance, in the
early days one of our old women who
had received a small monthly pension
from the overseersi of the poor for years
had been taken off of public relief and
The same pension given by a benevo-
emit individual; her case had been in
1estigated by the overseer's visitor by |
he Associated Charities agent, and
the had had a friendly visitor for a
ong time. Finally from a new land {
ord we learned that this woman had a
laughter who owned a six Thousand {
lollar house and was quite able to pro-
tide for her mother. This taught us
he lesson that where pensions are CIV
n investigation should always be con-