Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1895-02-09

baSket)-Miss Dorothy Dick the princess
of-what in the world is this meant for?-
T-r-e-. Oh, 1 lay I know. Princess OF
Trebizonde. Master Percy We're as a Spanish
brigand. Miss Patsy Kake as Come into the
garden, Maud" Master and the Misses-I
wish the goodness people would learn to
write. Turns to colleague) Well, dear, l
came in low-necked dress because knew
it would suit my style.
CThey go on.)
First Mother-"Yes, she's supposed to be
Mary Queen of Scots. Pretty character.
isn't it? Is your little boy engaged for this
waltz, Mrs. What-is-it?"
Mrs. What-is-it consulting card on wrist
of small Choctaw Indian)-"Say you'll have
much pleasure, dear"
Small Choctaw Indian (grudginSly)-
you'll have much pleasure"
First Mother-''Very well. then, you two
go and dance this together as nicely as you
possibly can, mind. MARY Queen of Scots,
seven years old, puts finger to mouth shy
ly-Choctaw Indian blushes.) Now, don't be
silly gtrl. Let the dear little boy take
your arm. OFF you co.
Mrs What is title up the sweet little
girls shoelace for her before you start
dear
Choctaw Indian-"Oh. bother!" They
waltz
First Mothar-'I should have been here
earlier, only I've had such a TODD at home
with one of the servants, and"
Mrs. What-is-it (hySterically)-"Oh, don't
talk to me about servants, please. I'm tired
to death of mine, what with one thing and
another Take my present houSemaid, for
instance. l must say I've beer more than
a mother to that girl, giving her bits Of
ribbons that l didn't want, and all that,
and only this morning what do you think
that girl had the cool impudence to go and
do?"
First Mother-"Goodness knows
Mrs. What-is-it Gnsstently)-"No, but
guess
First Mother feebly)-"I couldn't, really.
l know that cook we had once
Mrs. What-is-it with gloomy triumph
Broke a saucer that's been in the family
for years and years.
First Mother-"Well, this cook
Mrs. Enthusiastically, l was so cross
with her 1 could scarcely trust myself to
speak. OF course (bitterly), it was an ac-
cident.''
First Mother-"Oh, that's always the cry.
This girl 1 want to tell you about
Mrs. What-is-it-"Well, there really isn't
time to finish telling you what have to
put up with. You must come round one
afternoon, and l can have good, long
| talk"
(Choctaw Indian, shyly trotting around
Mary Queen of Scots, finds his tonguel
Choctaw Indian-"Wha's your name?
Mary Queen of Scots Gn thin voice.
"Fweda. What's yours?'
Choctaw Indian-"D'you go to school,
Mary-"I don't 'zackly go 10 school, but
I'm IN me SuDSIWactlOn LADIES. boa SlSp
on my foot too much, viii! your?
Choctaw-"You don't dance very well, L
don't think. You seem so clumsy with
your arms and legs.
Mary farnkly)-''Yes. am wayver
awkward l can't do. many things nicely
yet"
Choctaw-"Shall you go up to supper
at 90
Mary-"If mall let me, I SHALL
Choctaw Observation-Disclosures you never
do nothing without askin' your ma? Oh
you are funny little girl! l never take
any notice of what my ma-(Catches slght
of his parents eye and his parents hand,
and stops suddenly. Hasn't your ma got
bony arms?"
Mary (proudly)-"Oh, all mas family's
like that. But mas nuvNing. You ought
to Aunt Mawia. Do you mind dong up
my shoe lace again.
Choctaw (aggrievedly) -" Here, l say!
You're beginning to be a bit of a nuisance.
I'd better take you back docs 500
Mrs What-is-it-"So this dreadful nurse
maid-Ah. here you are, dears. Enjoyed
your dance? That's right. Now run along
into the other room and see Punch and
Judy, and don't bother me when you see
I'm busy talking"
Voice of Punch drom neXt room, address,
ing Pandean Piper)-'1 thought you said
your little dawg Toby wouldn't bite. Why,
he's bin and bit my nose arr off,
Sound of shrill laughter from Punch's
audience.)
First Waiter Oehind table)-"Two more
vanilla ices. missile? Certainly CTo col
league)-"Nice to see the young 'uns enjoy
ing of 'emselves isn't it?"
Second Waiter Cnorosely)-"1 can't stand
kids at no price"
First Waiter-"Ah, you're a married man,
Cheesnian! Why. a little swell dressed up
as Emery the Eighth, or Shakespeare, or
one of that lot, comes up ERE. just now
on'y about 'leven years old he wasn't-and
he says, Waiter he says Gust like th1p.
and I says, Sir to your and he says,
Isn't there any place ABOUT here where a
man can have quiet smoker
Second Waiter-"Good Laudr
First Waiter-"And so 1 says to him.
DO you want to smoke particular now,
sr?' and the nipper he stomps his little
foot, and he says, Good gracious. waiter
can't you see that I'm simply perishing for
I'll go and make inquiries. sir" and I've
kep'm out Of his way ever since. Two
more vanillas. Missile? By all means"
(Serves again with much genality)
Short Stout Picrrot with air of self-de-
niaD-"I never care for more than about
six or seven mince pies, you know, at
time. AS a matter of fact (confidentially),
I don't believe they half agree with me.
Who brought you? Your guvnor?'
Life Guardsman -four feet ten)-"Eldest
sister. points with calle) There she is.
Laughing with the Jay in the white waist
coat.
Pierrot (critically)-"Not bad looking, is
she?'
Life Guardsman (casually)-"Oh. she's
pretty r2ht-for sister,"
Pierrot-"Well, as l was going to tell you,
this Johnny at our school, thinking he
could play footer better than other people,
worms hmself-fairly worms himself-into
the second team, and goes gassng about
as though he was G B. Fry! Very well,
then"
Life Guardsman-'Is this my lemonade?"
Pierrot-"Well, so - fill up my glass,
waiter!-he gets, as l say, most fearfully
big over it, and writes home and all that,
and it was arranged that he should play as
it might be next Saturday. On the Friday
night Chief meets him and says: Donald
son, you're looking seedy, my boy. Go up
stairs and see the DOCTOR And when old
Donaldson came down, what do you think
he'd got? Why with ecstasy, mumps!'
Life observation-disclosures"
Pierrot with increased enthusiasm
Good old mumps! Couldn't play of
course and so Now which of you
chaps has been and boned my cake? You
are set of chuffs, upon my word"
young mother with small children looks
at clock)
Young Mother-"Now 1 think we'd bet
ter see about the carriage"
Small Children with amazemenO-
"Whaffor!'
Young Mothe1-"Why, to take you home,
h-lf