The Wadsworth dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1892-1899, 1895-07-06


He Seeks Safety In the Rain Barrel His
Experience ut Church-Not Sure That In.
dependence Is n Great Institution.
Here's a letter for We, Matilda, " said
lsaac Sholdron rs he returned from the
postotlice Mt Holland, in Bucks county
Its from Philadelphia, and l want to
know who it's from and what It's about.
Jest tear it open Us quick as you can and
let me know all about it," Mrs. Sheldron
tore off the envelope. and adjusting her
spcctacles read:
PHILADELPHIA, June "a. 1894.
DEAR AUNT take my pen In hand to drop
you q few lines to let you know we are all well
and hope You and Uncle Ike are the same. |
amt got much to write about, for 1t Is 80 hot
here In the city, so | will close by saying that |
saw Tommy Johnson. Bill Arnold and Gus Sla-
ter at the baseball game yesterday, and they al
said they'd go with me again this year to spend
the Fourth OF July at your house, where we had
such dandy time last year. We will be up
next Saturday In good time. Your affectionate
nephew. RoDEHT GILMORE.
When the old MAJ had heard the letter,
he jumped from the wagon in "a hurry and
pranced about rs il mad, cxclaiming in n
loud voice: ''Drat your internal relationsl
Why in thunder weren't they all girlsf
I'll go right back to town II send a pos.
tai card to that there youngstcr and tell
him to stay home till he's wanted. It'll
only cost me IL cent II will save me "a lot
of worrying and trouble"
You'll do no such a thing, you old
IDIOT replied his wife. Robert Gilmore
is my sister 5 only boy, and ! don't sec
why lie shouldn't come to see his aunt
! once II year and bring some Of his friends
along"
You don't, don't your shrieked the
Did man. Maybe you don't remember the
giIie the young scinlps had when they
were here last year. | never had such "a
time in my life and don't want and won't
have another like it if | can help 1t. No,
you don care what mischief your folks
do, nor how much have to suffer for their
d~cviltry, for it's nothing else than real
dow deviltry They camo up here last
year as meek as SO many kittens and looked
MS if they had no more mischief in 'en
than ii wood horse"
Now, Ike, just you shut up. Them
boys is a-coming, and I'll do all l can to
help I'm have a good time on the farm.
They arc u whole year older than they was
last year and must have more sense"
Yes, they'll come. Why shouldn' t they
when you re such an old ninnys You don't
care II picayunc for mo and never did, only
to get mo to work FOUR rocky old farm,
which wasn't worth anything till | tackled
it nearly 40 years ago. Yes, them kids
will bo here even If it costs you us much IA
it did last year. It's u good thing for you,
my old lady, that you own the farm and
that bank account, or I'd get up and get
out of here before them young tornadoes
- r,,,rn III .~-A I,,. - -
peace from this time till after they go back
home again. If / had the money, I'd go
OFF and get as drunk IL; old Bill Jacobs did
when his wife gathered up her belongings
and left him"
Here, Ike, you've said enough, and l
want you to shut up, or I'll turn the tables
on you again, you worthless and migrate
full old dronel Think what I've lone for
you all these years. Why, you're enough
to make "a marble statue angry. Come
right into the house and get your dinner
before everything is cold"
Defeated in the argument, which gener,
ally happened, Isaac put the horse and
wagon away and meekly entered the house.
After dinner his wife sent him to Green's
store on an GRAND. On his way back he
stopped at the Wayside inn to chat with
several neighbors and to them related the
whole story.
Yes" said he, 'the old woman gave it
to me pretty severe, but | don't see how l
can help taking it. She's full 10 years old
er than l am and will die some day, and
then I'll have "a chance to havc my wa
for a little while anyhow. That scamp
Bob Gilmore, who is II son of my wife's
sister Hotty, is coming up here with three
other young pirates to spend the Fourth of
July again. When l think of what the
gang done last year, | almost wisht the
internal BritIshcrs had whipped Washing
ton and his army So that we'd had no
Fourth Of July. Idon't think there's much
independence in the day anyhow unless it
is for city brats 10 worry the life out Of u
haruMorking farmer.
What did they 90 last Year, You'd
better ask what didn't they do. I'll tell
fou, The Fourth come On n Sunday, and
aly5&Sa ~ in bed till 8 O'Clock on sun
- ~ .uast - r.t. Them chaps Co3.2
No lie cay Lofo.o with u whole wagonful