Waterbury evening Democrat., 1895-01-26
Ispecial Correspondence.l l

Special Correspondence.l
 NEW YoRE, Jan. 22.-Socicty, with a big CT lit;Ic <. in a social. phi!osophic or political sense, always means thu two sexes. Thcro never has Lcen and thero never can be society without women, par ticularly as tho term is employed here, where women arc i;s essential feature, men Leing in n way incidental Women arc the keepers of tho gates of society. They de lermine these of the other sex who shall enter Gnd thO>o who shall bn excluded. They arc ever socially umHipJUeut aud should be. It iS tLe:r evident and iualien- able privilege, No man woUld think of oisputng if.
 It may hN doubted indeed if men in gen eral relish eo'uty :S w',L cn imagine they do They enjoy lt >n much thcmSr Ives that they can hardly t.r r.idc th hC'Ievo that their fathers. husbands, brothers, can be indifferent to it, much less hO djsrlr1snd with it D. men like society,"" must h", from tk"ir Voint Of view, r,'!u,.dant, even an a' SU:'I, Hl.s -tiun How eau they tail tp like Y, l> fhC wumanS a1-wor
 when IL i- su dcitahtGul Tu her ycs: to tLvm, uo. She cannot bc int!u~'rl tn think that shr dur> not sec with i:' uni versAl v!r \ni thc inCapaCity tn chlngo her IHet!uc'ivr spontaneous thought causes h2r m:iny di~appointmcntS, ertan- P;cs h,r ln I.LUncTLhl" tr0uhiCs
 Wha: Men Ui;cn Like.
 Shl Lol,> Una, to c,,ur,,!r that civilized man at I.rcu GucS not like society. of which s!.c fur:l'~ ;h, principal, tho more -cOnSpiCuoUS psrt l. equiv Ilent tn CunCCd- ing that hc d"l~ Hot like Ter. which IS, in her view. I:,. 'rnu>iy unnatural, ;.h~O- Mtcly lnconc,';> ut4lr. But dneS this fol low l. she u"t rJuiOundirc thiugsy Has she not taken Tor granted what was never impliCd' X man may like women and dislike SoClcty, Hs a great many men do. Liking women Is very vague, has ittle 1 significance Individual men, men of l taste, cultuV, scnsibility, seldom like women in tho mass, as n sex, any moro than women having any claim to enlight- | cnmcnt like men in the mass, as a sex. | Such men must find in a woman some thing to like before they liko her They are not drawn tn Ter ccnCriCally, as bar l bariaus might be- and it would bo any thing but iattcring to her if they wore. Men. it must he allowed, go in great | numbers into society, Is not this ample 1 proof of tholr iondnesS for it? Not in it. l self They go not because they enjoy it, l but because their wives, sisters daughters, urge them to. and hrcausc these cannot v confess that 1t Is q dreadful bore, and how l glad they are tn leave it, as the expression of their faces shows at that pleasant mo. | mCnt' If women were not 50 welded to i society, nearly all functions wDuld cease. l Social entertainments s0 called would be- come obsolete from the fact :hat men would absent themselves, and women | would not Ec quito satisfied with their own exclusive company.
 Social HOlIOwness.
 An exception might hc madc ot very young men, from lS to D. who, not being | husbands. overflow with gallautry and miscellaneous funduCSs for the sex. They arc. in Cons,Qu"nCc eager in most cases to frequent assemblies where nimblc maidens disport themselves in the gayCst gowns and the most wItching smiles, There arC many exceptions, however. even among thcso Balls. usually so alluring, pail early on the most >CntimCntal and susceptible youth Fro they aTc fairly out of theiI l teens they tire of dancing and rolinquist 1t from saticty We all know how dC( cicnt k the supply ot dancing men in New | York and the larger cities. and how al most impossible II Is to meet the demand | whatever the premiums offered. II mere boy wCaTics Cl social hollownCss and friv olity. if frcsA, pretty, winning damsels whom he can s,ErCciy refrain from !dcaliI ing. cannot tempt him 10 iarry among them for f,w huNr> how can a matur, man of the wurld, It Jadcd Passions sat uratcd witl ,:.lruchce. he expected tc caIr for thv 1,s.Gly dull comedies. re hearsCd, season after season until they ar, | rCWucLt
 Tho opinion that most men have nc mental orrctitc for society may be safely trusted They arc corgcd with II 10 b, frank and WJlld rcJrct IL openly were i not for fcnitAue lnilu,uCcs and feminine blanQishmeLts. Hey do not tell thei hostesseS so, of course An unwritter though universally recognized law of so cioty is thGt no one within its portals shal say what hc thinks 1T admit that any thing that appCrtairs 10 It is not pleasant Society people art perfectly conscious tha they arc sham> and that society Is th blrCl >t sham uf nli Nobody is deceived b, "vCJl body wishes 70 pretend tha: h. Is. and s.' tEt Ca:!.c Is kept up and has per haps its satIrlc"t Gcat!hcations
 Swampcd With ConvcntiOnality.
 It iS not assumed that therc aro no amiablc. clever interesting women in so cicty There are invariably Every circl contains them II II were not so S0cict, would perish of hamilton But plont! as they may LC, no ,nan has. as a rule an! chance to enjoy their speech or their com pany Evuuing assemblies are apt to bu without rri osr ' conversation. wtthou meIIownrss ,r !,i fpancy Everything | fraGmcntary a"d ituI.Ic>s Drawing room are commonly ,ruN>uvd and hot The tall is made Up4ai personalities and platitudes | Cf miSuHGeT>t uOd opinions and unflntshe, sentences IL Is. III l:." main. D Izz. 1ubbl and baldegdash FES scene is tnco:ufort able, aud the Chara"trrs are ul e''r1stive not necessarily. but because il.V Ire al run together society Is one of the poores of places 10 get acquainted or to get profit | Persons WEN CINc met thore for a series O seasons arc surprised sometimes oa beinl thrown together elsewhere to discover tha they are mutually interesting If ait th agrc, abe rrlurntcr> uf society werc ta X al cut Ot u anu upptlachcd under tayprab conditions. t!:t.y a2rrrnblcncss would b appreciated and heightened Society q constituted aitd managed Is a clog tu prog resS and a t>;ttr tr tdvl~ lis suprem l ConvCnticuGlit. <wl;np> it
 Nc w-I.dyi man Nyho amount tu any thing ln,t [" liar society IL k barren ant drC1rN v:."IsL Women who fundIy fanc, | that they HrI ..r~.t Ntt. there r'ultv appCa | very III, Hl.,i r."" have uu upl. :,t:nlty [, judge them li '.~ N '.,ll nnd N ;rt>irs 4 man who Ii.ip,.j 3avr any ut, 'i 70 wumleI should hr cMc.ttntvr them s;rgIy wnul, disappINN' Ui l. lat in Euddlr \ wom an Is II. M s'' !oTuing or sO dnnSCruu as when ni, nV, und In her S0litariu,>S sh Iriumphs 'u'.St lrCGuCI,ly ovyT man H.
 understands l., ,S uEa .Ip he k rupe witt her unity. and. unless pcIticOlE proof, 1 prone, then, tn keep uut uf hcr range
 Tho man Wuo wuUld tuTn p4ic at
 vision ot hcrrvtrrating isI'3rc ih nrNC | Elanch LctOre huEdr.r! i.cr l. Unche in society There she l-."tt'. alt vluiE ment for oflcnsc aI.d u,ivns'', ct lsabl 10 attack and n v most l!.tTl"! he | shC comes to ruIuuFvLrHu th!s IGIlt, socj . 1ne besT Sn0ss @ T for the Least Money