The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1895-03-18
TOLD ON THE QUIET

The Broken Bow Republican is author.
fly for the statement that many Ne
braska farmers are singing the follow
ing:
II am going to Utah! have been eat
en- up by grasshoppers, hailed through
with hailstones, burned up and
dried out, blown away, hauled
around by chattel mortgage fiends,
burned sunfower stalks and cow chips
for fuel, Tapped sorghum and pancake
batter for food. lived in a sod house
stay with it another year? Well, L guess
not. am going toward the setting sun.
will get me ten acres of land in irriga-
ted Utah. I'll build me frame house,
have my cows, pigs and chickens; I'll
have me alfalfa hay and all kinds of
fruit in its season, and when my ten
acres are paid for. I'll buy more and pull
down my house and build greater ones,
and store therein the good things of
earth, and enjoy it all for a time, and
FOOL thou hast suffered in Nebraska
and enjoyed in Utah. Die and be buried
in peace, and be thankful that you did
not stay in Nebraska, dry up and blow
away
Come,
A Leighton PENN firm advertises for
a man to travel through the country and
buy up farmers hides" He had better
confine himself to drouth-stricken Ne
braska, where this commodity-for such
it now seems to be-is cheap.
Here is a hint from Printers Ink:
The wife of a Kentucky colonel
Wanted help for house duties diolonel,
And they say that she got
OF good girls quite a lot
By an ad in a small local jolonel!
Printers Ink. some time ago, sent out
requests for opinions as to the best six
newspapers in the United States for adj
vertising purposes-such as would cover
the entire country. Many peculiar-yery
probably the most idiotic of them all
came from a man who intimates that he
lives in Omaha, who named:
East % New York World.
East (2) Louisville Courier-Jou rnal.
West 80 st. Louis Globe-Democrat.
North (D Minneapolis Tribune.
South 90 New Orleans Picayune.
South (6) Atlanta Constitution.
Although the communication is dated
Omaha. it is very evident that it must
have been written in the office of the
st. Louis Globe-Democrat. No one who
souri, river would show such a lack of in
telligence.
To imagine, for one moment, that a
paper in st. Louis could supply the adj
vertising demands of the west is folly
run mad.
Why there are fifty journals-yes. a
hundred-published west of st. Louis that
have ten times the influence of that pa
per in this section of the country, and
even further west. a copy of the sheet
can be occasionally found on a book
stand or on the floor of an exchange edi-
tor; but that is all,
There is not a paper-I care not how
small-published in any town between
Omaha and San Francisco, that does not
WELD a greater power in the west than
the Globe-Democrat, whose only utter
ance is against the interests of the sec
ton of the country it is put forward as
representing. 1t is not a western paper;
it has 20 sympathy with the west; tear
off the mask of hypocrisy and deceit!
Carl Smith, once a reporter on the late
lamented Times of this city. but now in
Omaha, is sending out a column or so of
rhymes and Jingles each week on the
syndicate plan. If the latest is the best,
then Carl had much better dig up some
of the rhymes of the past, when he
wrote for the mere love of it. and not to
fill a certain space each week. As a
poor imitator of Cy Warman, Carl is
success-that is all that can in justice
be said.