The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1895-08-22
4 MYSTERIOUS VISIT
BY MARK TWAIN.

The first notice that was taken oi
me when | settled down" secentIy.
was BIZ a gentleman who SAID lie was
/ an assessor, and connected with tho
. nited States InteraI Revenue depart
menk. / said | had never heard 81
his branch OF bl siGcss before, but /
vas very glad 10 see him all the same
would he sit DOWN He sat down.
l did not know anything particular 10
say. and yet I felt that people who
have arrived at the dignity OF keeping
/ house must be conversational, must
. Do easy aud sociable in company. 50
/ in default Of anything else = say. i
asked him if he was opening his shop
! in our neighborhoOd? He said he
was. did not wish to appear ignor
ami. but [ had hoped he would mon
/ ton what he bad for sale.
| yeatred to ask him, How WAS
/ trader And he said, 80 So"
! | then said we would drop in, ana
I i we liked his house as we'll as any
other, we would give him our custom.
/ H. saii he thought we would like his
/ tahli7hment we'll enough to C0uilue
.ur. elves to it-said he never saw
anybody who would go off aud hunt
| up another man in ms line after trad
inu with him once.
That sounded petty complacent,
ont barring that natural expression OF
ylllainy which we all have, the man
cooked honest enough.
[ DO not know how it came about
exactly, but gradually we appeared to
roelt down and ran together, coyer5an-
tionaily speaking, and then everything
went along as comfortably as clock
work
We talked, ana talked, and talked
at least, [ did; we laughed. and
laughed, and laughed-at least | did !;
Jut al tie time ] had my presence Of
ind about me-I had my native
iupwdneas turned On full head" as
tie cngineer say. [ was determined
. lind ont ali about his business in
-pit" OF ms obs ne answers, and l
was determined | would have It out
oc him without his suspecting what ]
was at. lmeant to trap him with 4
leap, deep ruse. / would tell him all
| about my own business, and he would
| naturally, 80 warm to me during this
seductive burst Of confidence that he
would forget about himself, and tell
rlo all abont his affairs before he sus
uccted what | was about, l thought
| To- myself, my son, you little know
whRt au old fox YOU are dealing with.
! said:
Now. you never would guess what
made lecturing this winter and last
springf"
No, don't believe i could, to save
lae Let me see lot me see. About
two thous;Hd dollars may be? But,
no; no, sir, [ know you couldn't have
made tnat much. Say, seventeen hun
dred, maybe?"
''Ha, ha, ] knew You couldn't. My
cturing receipts for last spring and
TINS winter were fourteen thousand
seven hundred and fifty. What DO
| you tbink Of that"
y lyit is amazing perfectly amaz
nr [ will make a note Of it. and
You say even this wasn't all?"
"AlI. why bless you. there was my
income from The Daily Warh0op for
fonr months about, about we'll. what
! should yol say 10 about eight thOu
| sand dollars, tor instance?'
Say, why, shonld say, / shonid
like 10 see myself rolling in just such
another ocean of atliuence Eight
Thousand III make a note Oft. Why,
an; aud on top Of all this | am still
ta understand that you had still more
~Ha, l,a, ha. Why you're only III
| tie suburbs Of it, so TO speak There's
Irty book. The Lnnocents Abroad.
pricc $3.50 to $500, according to the
binding. Listen to me Look me in
| lie eve During the last four months
aal 4 half. saying nothing ofsales he
fore that, but Just simply during tho
f.ur months and q half. we've sold
5000 Think of it, Average 81 d
pv say It's nearly 800 600. my
son, get half"
The suffering Moses. I'll set that
down Fourteen seven fifty eight two
hundred Total say. well, upon my
word. the grand total is about S2I3,0GG
o. S2lf00O Is that possible
.PossiAe, II theirs any mistake it'-
tie other way Two hundred and
fourteen Thousand cash, IS my inc0mr
f.r this wear If | know LoH to cipher.
Thea The gentleman got up to 90
!. came over me most uncomfortablY
| HAT may he ] had made my reyeia
IDauS for nothing. besides being fiat
tered INTO stretching them consider
EaHiy hv the strangers astonlshed eA
! rlamations But, no; at the last mo
nrIt h0gCAt,em5n handed me large
ereveIGue and said it contained hi,
advertisements; and that | would fine
boat ali about his business in it; anC
.jst he would be happy to have nay
n..-tarl: would. in fact be proud t
Ih.No i"a custom of Il man of sucl
iiae,!5.iauo income: ana that he rsaf
t. think there were several wealthy
men in tae city, hat when they came
7 H. tra II Hith him, lie discovered tha
hey had barely enough to live on
q 4 that. in truth it had been sach ;
weary. weary age since he had seen :
t.sh man face t. face aud talked {,
..,u. and touched h!m with his hands
that Gc could hardly refrain from EN-
Ihla"iag ma: in fuot. would esteem ]
Great favor if | would let him EN-
brace mo.
Ihis So pleased me thatI did no
trE u resist. bUt al'oEal this simple
hcagted stral-sN' - throw his arm
h,ou, ne and ,,avpa few tranquiliz
ifur tears down jha back uf my neck
,hau g went his way,
- soou rs ha WAS gone | onene,
H. embellishments | studied it at
Iycly for fonr minutes. I thel
coded mp the cock and said: "Hol'
~ Shile faint. Les Marie turn tn
griddle cakes"
By and by, when | came TO. | sen
down 10 She rum mill on TIE cOrne