The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1895-06-02
BURGLAR AND PLUM PUDDING.
feet Was Mortifying to a Proud
Chicago Family.


From the Chicago Inter Ocean. q
A certain family in popular residence
district on the north shore is in temporary
disgrace with its ueighbors. and all be-
cause of a series of ludicrous misadven-
lures in which the members of the fam
lily referred to were the actors, and which
resulted in racket that made some peo-
pie think the noise-makers had got mixed
up in their dates and were celebrating the
Fourth of July six or seven weeks ahead
of time. 5rr ,r.
The family consists of three members,
father, mother, and 12-year-old son. 1t
occupies a pleasant home and has been al
was regarded by friends and acduain-
tances as the possessor Of domestic hap
piness Of an unadulterated brand. 1t
would, no doubt, still hold a good title to
general esteem If It's serenity had not
been disturbed some time ago by a visitor
The visitor was a parsonage that has a
faculty of making himself ubiquitous in
Chicago-to wit, a gentlemdny, indus
trious burglar.
Mr.. Burglar took precautions to give
the family as little trouble as possible
during his visitation. Toward this end he
removed his shoes before crawling though
AilN panty NluuOW winch ne mad selected
as the means of ingress, probably because
he desired to strengthen himself with a
slight collation. before proceeding to active
labor. In the cleaning he mistook a bot
tie of Worcestershire sauce for imported
beer. and he helped himself to a generous
swiG of the liquid to wash down some
sandwiches he had eaten. The fiery relish
took the robbers breath away and a Sc
we're lit of coughing aroused the house
hold. The thief escaped, knocking down
a shelf full of crockery as he squeezed him
self through the window, but he was so
thoroughly scared that he forgot to nick
up his shoes in passing.
The cough, which was louder and more
rampant than the most boisterous lung
disturbance ever described in patent medi-
cine literature, the avalanche of Guns
dishes and preserve bottles, and the shoes
Whlch the milkman next morning suggest
cd might have been stolen from a suicide
have proved monuments of terror to the
family ever since. Father mother or son
has scarcely slept. Every night there is a
pilgrimage through the rooms and a thor
ough examination of closets, cellar and at
tic. When the inquisitors retire to bed it
is only to fan into a semi-slumber and
dream of masks, dark lanterns, revolvers
ana other accessories of the midnight
marauder. The family is living in a state
of constant alarm.
The menu Of Sundays dinner included
English plum pudding. Plum pudding is
about the last thing that nervous people
should eat. When taken in large quanti-
ties by little boys it is positively hobgoblin
producing The little boy in the north
shore home had no appetite for anything
only plum pudding Sunday. He ate it al
dinner and again at supper, and would
have eaten more later on only he fell
asleep on the sofa and had to be carried
n I'M. sfa1.1
pened. He had an attack of somnambul-
ism about midnight and got up to search
for burglars and plum pudding.
When his mother awaking from a ftful
sleep, discovered the outline of a ghost
like visitor in her room she screamed
Murder In an instant paterfamilias
was on the floor and moment later two
white-robed figures were rolling over on
the carpet in hopeless confusion.
IT'S l, papa" roared the boy, who had
been literally choked into consciousness.
Meantime the mother kept up tornado
of yells, believing her husband was being
murdered. The boy, when he got through
shouting on his own account, commenced
yelling for the sake of his mother. under
the impression that some one was attack
ing her.
It took several minutes to straighten
things out. When all was quiet everybody
felt ashamed and mortified. Half the
neighborhood sat up all night and was
afraid to venture out to look for an ex-
PLANTATION of the noise. The actors in the
racket have kept a discreet silence. The
father told a friend yesterday that there
Is sewer gas in his house. and it is likely
he is looking for an excuse to move away.
DIR. Won Stephen, the head of the Ger
man postal service has just celebrated
his twenty-hfth anniversary as postmaster
general.