davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-06-21

Kansas is not crying calamity to
any notable extent this year. On the
contrary, reports of fair measure Of
prosperity are made from all over the
State. There is every promise of an
unusually big peach and plum crop,
and the apple and grape crops in
several parts of the State promise to
be phenomenal. Recent rains have
stopped the walls that had begun to
rise in some sections, and, altogether,
the State seems cheerfully minded
and fairly contented. Calamity howl,
ing don't pay.-Neoo York Sun.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-06-21
A Tragedy Of To. Day.

So you have decided to leave
him, my child p said the mother.
Yes" the young wife replied.
Remember, it is grave matter.
Such step is too important to be ta-
ken without deliberate and sincere re-.
hection."
81 have reflected. We can never
be truly happy"
Why"
We can never esteem each other
as we should. He doesn't look in the
least like Napoleon and my foot
doesn't bear the slightest resemblance
to Trilby's." From Judge.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-06-21
A Minister'S Experience With Heart
Disease,

Rev. l.. w. Showers, Elderton, Pa:
For many years my greatest enemy
has been organic heart disease. From
uneasiness about the heart, with pal.
pitation, it had developed into thump-
ing, futtering, and choking sensations.
Dr. Agnew's Cure for the Heart gave
instant relief. A few bottles have rid
me of almost every symptom of heart
disease. 1t is a wonder worker" Sold
by Wm. ), Rishton. 6.I5.Iy.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-06-21
R. G.. Dun & Cos. Weekly Re

R. G.. Dun & Cos. Weekly Re
oieso of Tra1e of last week says:
"The tide of business is rising,
even as it was falling just two years
ago, with surprising rapidity The
gain has gone SO far and SO fast in
some branches that the more conser-
vative fear it may not be maintained.
But the period of dullness whicn
comes in each market after an unusual
rise brings as yet nothing like a
corresponding decline. Industries
gain much, halt or fall back a little
and then gain once more. The de-
mand for consumption steadily in
creases as the employment and wages
of the people increase. The demand
for money expands. One serious ques.
tion rema ins, whether the crops will
be full enough to sustain large busi-
ness. But the worst reports to. day
are better by far than the estimates
recently current.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-06-21
TO TEST TIE GARB LAW.
LANCAsTER'S SCHOOL DIRECTORS WILL
REFLECT AN INELIGIBLE TEACHER.

LANCASTER, June 5.-If Governor
Hastings approves the Garb bill its
constitutionality will be tested at an
early day with case from this city.
Miss Lena Wege is teacher in the
public schools of this city. She be-
longs to one Of the most religious
sects in this community who wear a
peculiar garb.
She is an excellent teacher, and
under the bill just passed is not eligi.
BILE for reelection as teacher unless
she discards the peculiar garb she
wears. The Board of School Direc.
los do net want to lose the services
OF Miss Hege, and she will be re-
elected unanimously at the meeting
for the election of teachers this month.
The members of the Board are aware
that they violate this law by electing
Miss Hege, and TIE expectation is
that suit will be brought for the penal
ty provided and judgment entered
against the Board of Directors. An
appeal will be taken, and in that way
the constitutionality of the law will
be tested. The members of the
Board are unanimous in their opinion
that the law should be tested at an
early day, and public sentiment in
the community is behind the Board
in the testing of the law.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-06-21
Deafness cannot be Cured

by local applications, as they cannot
reach the diseased portion of the ear.
There is only one way to cure Deaf
ness, and that is by constitutional
remedies. Deafness is caused by an
inhamed condition of the mucous
lining of the Eustachian Tube. When
this tube gets inhamed you have a
rumbling sound or imperfect hearing,
and when it is entirely closed Deaf
ness is the result, and unless the in
flammation can be taken out and
this tube restored to its normal con-
dition, hearing will be destroyed for
ever nine cases out of ten are caused
by catarrh, which is nothing but an
inflamed condition of the mucous
surfaces.
We will give One Hundred Dollars
for any case of Deafness (cause by
catarrh) that cannot be cured by
Halls Catarrh Cure. Send for cir
culars, free.
F. J. CHENEY & CO, Toledo, O.
BsS~ Sold by Druggists, 7sc. I'm.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-06-21
"But evil is wrought by want of though

&" But evil is wrought by want of thought,
As well as want of heart"
By want of thought mothers allow daugh-
ters to become frail and puny. Over-study
in girls induces uterine disorders and weak
nesses, and blghts their future happiness as
wives and mothers. Joined to proper hygi-
enic care, DIR. Pierce's Favorite Prescription
is priceless remedy in such ailments, its
value becoming even more apparent every
year. Using it, the wan, debilitated school
girl gains color, flesh and spirits, losing those
deathly headaches, tormenting backaches,
languor, detection, and other symptoms of
functional irregularities, and nervous debility.
1t never harms the most delicate girl.
"Robertsdale, Huntingdon Co., Pa.
WORLDS DIsPENsARY MEDICAL AssOCIA-
TON:
"Gertemen ~ cannot sufficiently ex.
press to you my gratitude for the benefit
your medicine has conferred upon my
daughter. OF late she has suffered no pair
whatever. 1t is simply marvellous. You
have just reason to call it your "Favoritt
Prescription" and to stake your reputation
as physician on it, A "favorte prescrip
tion it is, indeed, to you and to thousands
in this land, and believe will be to suffer
ing women the world over.
Yours gratefully
THOMAS THIRLWELL
Asthma cured by newly discovered treat
ment. Pamphlet, testimonials and reference
free. Address Worlds Dispensary Medca
| Association, Buffalo, n. Y.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-06-21
Stock Certificates.

Corporations desiring stock certi-
ficates, are invited to call and see
samples of lithograph work at The
COLUMBIAN Office. Workmanship and
prices are guaranteed to compare fav-
orably with city printing, If.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
He, Knew His Business.

est. Louis isn't much on the
worlds fairs and things Of that sort -
said Joseph Goosmon of that city yes
terday, "but when it comes to COM
paliison of our policemen, especially
on the score of intelligence. we are
not afraid Of all the rest of the world.
A friend of mine had an experience
in this line the other night which
proves my contention. When he is
especially hard worked my friend is
quite likely to walk in his sleep, and
on the occasion referred to Il police
officer found him meandering UP and
down the street, and mercury lowering
about zero, with nothing Oh but his
nightshirt. The policeman woke him
UP, escorted him to his home, and Or
dered hiln to dress
Why, I am going back to bed,
said my friend.
Sc oh, no, you're not said the Of
ficer. you're going down to the lock-
UP with mel
You aren't going to put me in
Jail. are your queried my friend anx-
iously.. Why, I'm a sonnambulist,
you know
L don't give a what church
you belong to- profaQlely replied the
intelligent member Of the finest, you
amt going TO prance around the
streets Of this town in your shirt
tails, So you get into your clothes
and come along. Times.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
THESE ARE eTICKLERS
A QUARTER OF AN HOUR WITH
THE JOKERS.
Mtrth-PrOvOkfng Paragraphs Gath
cred from the Pages of the Humor-
Gus Papera-Life's Bright Side ms
the Wits See 1t.

d The new boy had been an inmate
Of the polttician's family for about
two weeks, and every day of that
time, almost, had been devoted in part
to selecting name for the baby.
Everybody who has had experience
in that department Of human exist
ence knows the difficulties and dant-
gers Of this trying ordeal, and the
politician was s no exception. His
wife was a patriotic woman, and in
sisted that the boy should be named
George Washington.
''Oll, give him some other NAME"
begged the father.
"Why," she exclaimed "you could
not have better name than that
''It's too, good"
Not for my baby" she replied,
folding the little one proudly and
fondly to her bosom.
But it is, my DEAR" urged the ia
Their. 'He's going to be a politician
as his father and grandfather were
before him and we Oughtn't to handi-
cap him with a name Like that He
can't live up to it, dear. He can't; l
know he can't. I've been in the bust
ness and I know what I'm talking
about. SO does the baby's grandpa,
and that youngster won't be at it a
year before he can't look a little
Ratchet in the face to save his life.
Name him something elise, dear" he
pleaded, 1T you don't want to ruin
his future forever. "-Dctroit Free
Press
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
A Narrow ESCAPE.

The reverend doctor is. "a little
round, fat, oily man Of Cod" but he is
blessed with a brain and a laugh far
greater than most men, and he never
hesitates to tell a joke, even though
it be lone on him." The last time he
met the Saunterer he had been having
trouble with the steam boiler Of his
house, and had sent for a plumber to
locate the difficulty.
'"The plumber came,'' said the doc
tor, ''and proved to be burly Irish
man, twinkling all over from the sole
Of his feet to the top Of his carrot pate.
sent him down stairs, and in my
study, just over the boiler, by the way,
awaited the result Of his Investigations.
In about. ten minutes he reappeared,
looking somewhat disturbed"
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
Prcparinx for Argument.

Hello, Hakenton," said one Of the
statesmen in the house Of representa-
tives as he picked up from his neigh
boris desk four or five dictionaries Of
invectives and slang. II see you're
studying philology."
"Not exactly" said his neighbor,
burying himself still further in a treat
Use on the history of bllingsgate. "Tm
merely preparing for my debate on the
financial stion."-Chicago Record.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
A Girl Murderer.

A girl, aged fourteen, has been an
rested at Staroja, Russia, ON the charge
OF numbering the two-year-o,d child Of
her mistress by strangulation. She has
since confessed that she had previously
committed sixteen similar murders,
ten OF the victims being children who
had been contldad to the care Of her
mother. She states that her only mo-
tive for the crimes was that she dis
liked the trouble of looking after the
children.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
George w. Mcbride.

state Of Oregon. The new Senator Is
about Al years of age and has been
identified with the politics of his state
since 1884, when he was candidate
for the nomination to Congress In
1887 he was elected Secretary Of the
State and reelected in 1891. thus serv-
ing eight years. Though he is popular
and well liked, his election is a sur
prise, as it was surpassed that owing
to poor health he would not be a can
dldate for any office. He took no part
in the senatorial fight which resulted
in his election.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
BEASTS AS NEIND-RE ADERS.
Survival of the Lost Sixth Sense
Common to Animals and Men

Survival of the Lost Sixth Sense
Common to Animals and Men
do you think animals communicates
together?' was asked of the Hagen
beck lion tanner ~
"They put their heads close together
and seem to have a sort Of sign lap
guage. They express such simple
thoughts as elm tired,' get out of the
plainly to my observation, among each
other.
sThe language Of animals seem quite
plain to me-" continued the famous lion
tanner, earnestly. Men have consid-
erably ability to communicate by facial
expression and gesture, but school
themselves to repreSs these natural eN-
pressions Of rage, fear or friendship,
and say by oral language what their
wisdom dictates, often quite the oppo-
site of what they feel. "<,
animals on the other hand are too
simple to make believe and this gift.
which men misuse, is their regular
mode of communication. Notice how
quickly a dog scents rage or sorrow in
his masters face. We can't see he
expression Of a lions face except of
rage, but his companions can
"I have also thought that animals
have the gift Of thought reading in;
stead Of power to speak. Did you ever
see AN animal fail to understand an
other? I never saw such an instance.
The range of their thought is limited.
I do not think they can read mems
thoughts expect very impelfectly be.
cause they are SO extensive and com
pick and beyond their comprehension.
I am inclined to think that what we
call mind reading Is mere survival here
and there of the lost sixth sense which
was probably common to primitive
man and which animals possess to this
day."-Kansas City Star
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
tAntOn Seku.

Hearst, the widow of the California
Senator. Special Lniforus Of the
Haydn period We're provided for the
performers. These were close ftting
and heavy and very warm and by ex-
posing himself after the musical Mr..
Seidl contracted q severe cold which
developed into pneumonia Mr.. Seid1's
home is at 3S East Sixty-second street
NeW York
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28

us this the place where ye sits and
wroites y said he.
1T is" said T.
Then said he, "ye may thank God
We wasn't blown to hell
And" concluded the doctor, IT told
HIM l agreed with him in more ways
than one. Boston Budget.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
A Fine Distinction.

'"There is too much verbal talk about
this fight" said a man to a pugilist.
verbal TALK" sneered the bruiser,
''you think you understand the English
language, don't your
Il do, and that is why I say there
has been too much verbal talk. Put UP
some cash, and let the money talk
Puck.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
The Word and the Deed.

Slothful Snawley-Didn't I tell yer
that if yer went up an axed fer 4
drink O. whisky ut old Kernel Blue
grass house, you'd get 'er? Great
stuff, too!
Saturated Sam (musingly)-Ycs; dat
was fine ticker; but I don't jest know
wot ter make of his words wen 1 axed
i'm fer it.
Slothful Snawley-Why, wot did e
say?
minnit and said dat it was request
dat he could not refuse, as he always
b'heved dat whisky was good fer both
man and beast.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
MARY LOWE DICKINSON.
Newly Elected President Of thl

Newly Elected President of the
Council of Women.
Mrs. Mary Lowe Dickinson, the
newly elected President Of the Nation
al Council of Women, is a resident Of
New York, and her election removes
the central office Of the order to the
metropolis. Mrs. Dickinson is entirely
qualified for the position to which she
has been called, having long been an
active worker in educa tional and phi
lanthropical movements. When the
order of the Kings Daughters was or
ganized she was made its general secre-
tary and still holds the office Recent
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
SENATOR MCBRIDE.

The New Senator From Oregon
Comes OF a Distinguished Fam
lily.
The new United States Senator from
Oregon. Mr.. Geo. w. Mcbride, comes
of a distinguished family. Early in
the SIXTIES his father, DR.. Mcbride
was Lincoln's minister to the Sand
wich Islands and more recently his
brother John r. Mcbride was the first
Republican Congressman from the
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
Mary Lowe Dicl1inscn.

" she was honored by being made
dean of the woman's branch of the
University Of Denver. Having a large
experience i'm public affairs, and a tho
rough knowledge of Parliamentary
rules, being a fine speaker AID Il highly
cultured woman, it is safe to predict
that Mrs. Dickinson's leadership will
result in good to the organization.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28

"You told me the parrot you sold
me the other day could repeat every
thing it heard. Rubbish! Preach to
it as I will, it remains as dumb as
fish"
ut is quite true told you it would
repeat everything it heard; but then
it hears nothing; it is rs deaf as a
post
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28

$50 it's all over between us, is it,
Laura?' asked George fercely.
"Yes, George, the dream is past"
replied Laura. 81 wouldn't have
minded your flirting with all the girls
some of the time, or with some of
the girls all Of the time; but I object
to your flirting with all the girls all
the time. Leave me, there is the
doorr'
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
A Game Of Hunt the Hare.

Cholley (gleefully) why, it's taken
you five minutes longer to shave me
than you took fob Beardsley.
Barber (apologehcally)-Well, you
see, had to hunt for your whisker.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
They Were Used to 1t.

How" asked the captain of the
train robbers, did you manage to so
through 50 many passengers alone?"
Il had only" rejoined the ordinary
brigand, ito carry a whisk-broom in
my hand, and they suspected nothing"
Puck.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
just Like the RealThlng.

Johnnie-Oh, blank such a dinner
as this!
Papa-You, John! what do you
mean, sir, by swearing sir?
Johnnie--That's all right, papa. Sis
and I are playing keeping house and
am the Observation-Disclosures.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
Getting Scared.

Treetop-I'm going back to Hawyilla
Hayrick-What's the matter?
Treetop-About every sign save.
Beware of pickpockets!' or Beware
of impure baking powdarp
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
Her Crime,

Maud see that Flora Findesiecle
has been expelled from the New
Woman's club.
Marie-What for. >.' 4,a2%
Maude-For conduct unbecoming
gentleman. @. +"
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
Knew What He Wanted.

Kind Gentlcman-That boy just hit
you, did he?
Small Boy-Yes, he did.
Kind Gentleman-Well, now, why
don't you heap Goals of fire ON his head,
like good boy?
Small Boy-Do good boys do that?
Kind Gentlenmn-Yes, indeed, all
boys.
Small Boy-Well, guess / must be
dead wicked then, cause I don't want
to burn the chump to dea.h, 1 just
want to punch his head.-Life.
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
ANTON sEIDn.
A Famous Orchestra Leader VINO y
Seriously Ill.

Mr.. Anton SeidJ, whose name as an
orchestra leader is SO famous in nu.
steal circles, is the victim Of a serious
attack of pneumonia from which It IS
feared he viii not recover. About
week ago MI. Seidl with a specially
selected orchestra played a Haydn n1u-
steal given at Washington, by Mrs
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
Always Useful.

Quericus-What becomes OF the New
Jersey mosquitoes in winter?
Witticus-The Jerseyites use them
for ice-picka. 1
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
Why He Was Wrong.

Weary Whiskers-I sees here by dis
paper dat only 8 per cent of der per-
flesh is married. I'd think dat, wot wild
der Wimmin advancing so desc days,
deyd be more married gents driven to
dc road.
Happy Hours-Naw! Amt der VIM
min every day going inter more wider
fields of work? Wot, den, does Teller
want to endure der discomforts Of
trav'lin' if he's got good home, a
strong wife an new ways openin'
every day fer her to make der Twin?
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28

Customer getting his hair CUT
Didn't you nip off a piece Of the ear
then?
Barber reassuringly)-Yes, sir, a
small piece; but not enough to affect
the hearin', sir. .".
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28
No Voice in 1t.

Mrs. Meanitall-Then you look upon
marriage merely as a business part
nerShip?
Mr.. Meanitaill-I do, indeed. And
the husband should be the silent part
ner. ~ *e." y. ....
The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-28

"oulilu with DlO1ue HAIR anu Tie Dll-
est Of eyes l ever saw, stood on the
threshold. with a babe in her arms.
Without saying word, my wife rush
ed toward her, laid her arms caress-
ingly around the woman's neck, kissed
her repeatedly, and I heard her soft
ly, murmur:
"Dear sweet sister,
The blue eyes were instantly filled
with tears, and, kissing my wife. she
held out her baby toward me, sand sob-
bling piteously, exclaimed:
"Protection for 1vanovitch!'
took the child in my arms.
My wife led the sobbing woman to a
sofa, made her sit down by her side,
and laying that magnificent blonde
head against her bosom, she soothed
! and petted her as if she We're Il baby.
After the first moment Of emotion
had passed, the fugitive took some re-
; freshments, and the baby, sound asleep
was placed in my boys cradle. Sophie
Petrovitdh then, choking with sobs,
told us her thrilling story.
AFTER Ivan had fled, was praying
for his safety. and arranging our few
possessions for sudden removal, when
a loud knock fell on the door and q
harsh, commanding voice exclaimed:
In the name of the law, open!
II gathered all my courage and open.
ed the door. The officers of the law
pushed me rudely aside, and asked tc
! see Ivan. When replied that he was
not at home, and that did not know
where he was, they inquired whether
I was his wife. I answered in the af
firmative. They searched the apart
ment and finding nothing Of any
avail to them, they told me to pre-
pare myself as 1 must appear at once
before the magistrate. f.. -.
J.. "Taking my baby in ny arms, fol
lowed them, and without any furthe
: ceremony lodged in jail. The mex
The San Francisco call., 1895-12-29
NOT IN HARMONY.
One Band of Professional Musicians
Threaten Another With Arrest
for Burglary.

OAKLAND OFFICE SAN FRANCISCO CALL
90S Broadway, Dec. 2S.
The rivalry between the Fifth Infantry
band and the Oakland professional band,
which is an offshoot of its rival, may prob
ably be taken into the courts. The in
fantry band has been since its organiza-
ton under the direction of W. McBain.
There was dissatisfaction in the band, and
on recommendation Of Director McBain
Colonel Fairbanks ordered the discharge
of six of its members. The discharged
mem bers formed rival band, but each
member had an interest in the music,
which is valued at $1,000.
The question of the right Of ownership
of the music which the band had accumu-
lated then arose. Previously the music
had been stored in the bandroom at Lower
Broadway, and at the time of the split a
big extra paddock was placed on the door
to prevent the music being spirited away.
regiment and placed under the care of the
armorer.
No sooner had the discharged men
learned of the removal than they notified
McBain that if the music was not restored
to rs former place on the following day
those who presumably had taken it away
would be arrested on the charge of
burglary. Attorney Lin Church was re-
tanned to look after the interests of those
who had been discharged. Then McBains S
party secured an attorney, and said they,
too, were ready for war.
The question of ownership will be
settled next week, amicably, if possible,
but, if not, then by resorting to the courts.