The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1895-08-17

VI hiSciy IL uOt q Dlb vi use.
- "What ism t." asked.
Trying to propose to her." replied
Jack.
"Why isn't it?'
Because l can't" moaned-or, rather
howled-the poor boy, savagely kicking
my waste paper basket over.
''Why can't you?'
Because l haven't enough pluck"
Haven't you?"
'Oh, confound your questions!' yelled
Jack, tumbling right backward in his des-
peration. cts bad enough to be franti-
Gully in love with the most beautiful girl
who ever lived, and not possess the courage
enough to put the question, without hav-
ing to submit to the cross examination of a
Johnny who's reading for the bar and
wants to get practice in bullyragging wit
nesses. l tell you, | won't answer your in.
fernal questions. l say" concluded Jack
standing up and looking like one of the
witches in Macbeth" 81 won't submit
to itr'
''All right, old man, all right" 1 said
soothingly. "Nobody wants you to-"
''rhe fact is, said Jack, sitting down
again and assuming sepulchral tone, "if
l don't bring it off, I'll-I'll'-
WHAT"
"Ill die OF felo-de-se."
This was being legal with vengeance.
Here was my dear chum-six months since
the brightest, happiest, merriest fellow in
London-deeply in love with a young per.
son called Cissy Il don't to this day know
her other name, Jack never mentioned it J,
and in the depths Of despair because he
couldn't "bring it off," il may use hi:
own terse phraseology. We held converse
tons of this sort about six times day or
an average, but never before had he threa
tened to
''It shall be either by pistol or rope ,
growled Jack hoarsely, and for the moment
bolieve he wac thoroughly in earnest
thought I'd try the cynical, man o.
the world method and scott him out OF his
fooishness, so said:
Clancy being knocked over in this way
by pulling girl, weak, silly creature
who isn't even a new womann
Jack was all on fire in a moment
'She's not weak, pulling, silly creature
and she is a new woman, he shouted, for
getting for the nonce that it is not alto
gether desirable thing to be in love with
that feminine novelty.
$50 now"
(Parenthetically | may ask, Why is it tina,
people always end up deiiances of this
kind with those mystic words, so now. "
Why is it?
Jack" said write to her."
splendid idea!' said Jack, who had
been thinking of different ways of propos,
ing for six months and now hailed that OF
doing 1t by post as an entirely one and
original idea. Here goes, and thanks
awfully, old chap, for giving me the tip
Selling quite quire of nOtepaper Jack
scribbled and tore up about dozen pro
posals in writing. Then he turned round,
almost crying, and said that he couldn't dc
it that way, and he wouldn't, and he'd
hang himself, and perhaps then she'd be
sorry, and-and- and-why was he born?
"My dear boy l said, laying my hand
on his shoulder in the most fatherly way
imaginable, 'let's talk over the matter
quietly. Now, suppose propose for you?''
"No," said Jack. ''She'd think / was
afraid to ask her myself and refuse me Oh
the spot. No. | won't write, and won't
do it by proxy. Isn't there some other
way? Why don't you suggest something,
you great, long idiot, instead of sitting
there and grinning all night"
Now, l wasn't grinning, and l had been
suggesting things all the time, so naturally
felt much hurt. | therefore curled ur
and was silent.
For some time Jack smoked savagely
without speaking word After about
20 minutes of this he laid down his pipe
and began in a very apologize tone
81 Say
"Well?'
Cant you think OF any other way Of
proposing?'
"Wear flower which means Il love you.
A pansy or crocus or something. Then, il
she wants you, she'll wear one meaning,
Your sentiments are reciprocated.
"Don't think much Of that way" said
Jack. 'Know any other?''
Now, have never been in love in my
life, and never intend to be, and so | found
it rather hard to give Jack advice. How
ever, | racked my brains and at length
evolved this startling method:
'Propose to her through her father!'
ooh, you hopeless mass OF imbecility'
yelled Jack, bouncing up and grabbing his
hat. "HOw am | to do that when she
hasn't got father"
And he flung himself out OF the room in
a towering passion and did not come near
me again for quite a period. Well, how
was to know that the wretched girl hadn't
a farther? Was l expected to keep regis
ter of all the births, deaths, marriages and
divorces which occurred in those families