New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1895-01-22
THE Talk OF THE DAY.


The Philadelphia Record tells OF a careful cltt
zen who refuses walk in the middle of the street
when the sidewalks slippery because II he
should slip down and sustain injury on the side
walk he could recover damages from the city, while
ne could not If he was walking in the middle OF the
street.
DreSmXEf had the mSpey r Sng fS Mr. Mr
me n private with real feather beds on the
trucks an travel about in one blessed dream OF
happiness the year 'round."-Qndanapol Journal
There is a little patch OF land abutting on one OF
the magnificent buildings that flank Vctoria-st,
Westminster. London, which has remained waste fol
than twenty years. 1t is surrounded by a higt
boarding. covered with advertisements. The income
derived from these is such that II would not pay
the proprietor substitute building
A rIP-ToP MAN
He amt so much on speakin on maxim OF show
He lets the burn full while he's got breath
10 blow
Amt nothin OF a orator-but on another plan:
But in blockin legislation he's
Top
Don, know that folks is CROWN poor while he'i
a-growin rich;
When it's cold he takes toddy; when it's hot b
But in bockin' legislation he's a
Top
Man.
Don't know what bills they're readin-he's nevea
Jest stays there kinder quiet till they tell him how
An then he makes rifle and follows out theh
Fer in blockin' legislation he's
TIP
Mani
ATLANTA Constitution
THE Springfield Republican" regards the Episcc
pal pastoral letter just issued "a the most ins
81. Ia. fu.iN
months. 1T is a warning" it says. TO large
number OF the most progressive. scholarly, thought
ful and profoundly religious men In that Church
that they must face backward or be under the
ban OF heresy. and a notice 10 the young men thai
they must be content with but little II any more
liberty OF thought than they would find In the
Church OF Rome. This has not been the history Of
the Episcopal Church in the past on the contrary,
II has been Of the shameless; defenders OF free
dom within its own body. and this fact makes thii
reactonary utterance OF the bishops all the more
remarkable"
Lady (to her husband)-I am growing so fat tha,
] am beginning TO feel quite alarmed about II.
have just discovered that weigh ?4o pounds a.,
you set weighed
ION the butchers scales
"Oh. then. calm yourself. You weigh exactl,
half'-Ce Figaro
A Frenchman who has been travelling In thu
country says in lie Temps that what struck him
most in the United States was the American habh
of filling the teeth with gold. About $0o0O worth
OF gold is thus used every year. he says all q
which. OF course. is buried. So he figures that a
the end OF three centuries the cemeteries OF Amer
lea will contain gold to the value OF s50,ooOoo =
am afraid" he adds. that this will prove toe
tempting to the practical mind OF the future Amer
lean. and We shall see the day when companies
will be organized to mine the cemeteries and 70
cover the gold secreted In the jaws OF dead an
cestors" The wrNer then goes OFT and figures oil
the average amount OF gold In the teeth OF eaci
dead person. He has evidently been consulting th'
record OF vital statistics. for he says that NOW
people died in the United States In 1889 I'M
would bring the value of the gold In each dea'
persons teeth to an average of about b'A cents
and he thinks that in well-crowded cemeteries th'
mining OF this gold could be carried on prohtaov
despite the small average value.
In one OF our suburbs few Sundays ago I'M
priest OF one OF the churches announced that cor
lection would be taken up TO detray me cost y
In but Tln,-well never mind his other name-wM
gave a sly wink the plate was presehtaau y
him. but nothing else. The priest noticed Inn
derection, but surmised that H. might nave slt ~.
money al home. Not quite enough money naVlhl
been realized similar contribution was ieved tn'
following Sunday. A. before. every one gave on
Tim. who looked mighty sly ana me pr,est WIN y.
took him task for his conduct NOW I'm; NV, WIZ
didn't give something II only penny fa rs
father: I'm on TO ye] .o, nnab,np rather Jus
that I'm on to yez; that's all" Tim your w xers
are disrespectfui and require an explanation VIVA
do you mean?" "oh. faith. father, a-thryin 10 pu,
iieye yez wants the money to buy coal to heat IN
Ss .am."- e Ton Traveller TsIss A''