Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1895-09-30
MARRIAGE IF LINCOLN
His Experiences in Cpurtships and His
Matrimonial Doubts.
When the Guests Were Assembled to
u
Witness His Marriage With Miss
n 81
Todd, Lincoln Was Absent.

long
| that in his youth and early manhood Abra-
| ham Lincoln had full share of those senti-
| mental perplexities which cast glamor of
romance over the early life of most young
men. The more serious of Lincolns biogra-
pliers have preferred to say very little of
| his first attachment, and in this paper I
shall follow their admirable example. In
1888 the father of Anne Rutledge, who was
| a member of the South Carolina family of
| that name and who went from Kentucky
| to Illinois in 1929, kept the tavern at New
| Salem in the latter state. Miss Rutledge
was the belle of the village, and had, in the
young men who boarded at the taverRs sew
eral devoted admirers. Among these was
Lincoln, who was her frequent escort to
quilting bees and other such homely enter
| tainments in that primitive settlement
There is a story, entirely uncorroborated,
| that Miss Rutledge preferred another sutton
to the ardent Lincoln, but that she was de-
serted by him and did not accept Lncoln's
proposal until the last chance of hearing
| from this man had vanished. At any rate, it
was not until 1885 that she engaged herself
to Lincoln, who, not yet admitted to the
bar, was not in a position Immediately to
marry. A few months later Anne Rutledge
died, and her accepted lover was most deep
ly moved by the bereavement. That he gave
way to his melancholy in fashion not COM
mon among self-contained people such as
those with whom he lived, is unquestionably
true, and his friends were alarmed at his
condition. He went into retirement for
some months at the secluded place of Bowl
ing Green, and then returned to take up,
at New Salem, the broken threads of his
career. Not more than this is known of
Lincoln's first attachment, for he never
discussed 1t with any one in later life, and
the most intimate friend he ever had told
the writer twenty years ago that though
he had heard Of the affair he knew abso-
lutely nothing more about it than that there
was such a story.
The next affair that Lincoln had was not
nearly so bad-indaed, 1t is quite doubt
full whether there was ever anything in it
that Was serious. Nowadays, fancy Lin
with Miss Mary Owens of Green county,
KY, would be called only spirited flirta-
ton. However. Mr.. Herndon, who wrote
a life of Lincoln, got the whole story from
Miss Owens thirty years or SO later. Miss
Owens did not find that Mr.. Lincoln had
the refinements and accomplishments she
desired in her husband, so she prevented
him from making declaration. Even af-
ter half a century no commentator on man.
ners can find aught in this save commenda-
ton. That year, 1887. Lincoln moved to
Springfield. Ill, and was admitted to the
bar. He took up his residence with Joshua
Fry Speed, the only close and intimate
friend that he ever had. and from the pa
pers and letters left by Mr.. Speed a fuller
light has been thrown upon the later and
more serious love affair of Lincoln than
from all other sources, =
He Met Miss Todd,
In 1899 Miss Mary Todd of Kentucky ar
rived in Springfield to visit married Sis
ter. Mrs. Ed wards. AT the instance of his
friend Speed who was also a Kentuckian,
Lincoln became visitor at the Edwards,
and before long it was apparent to the
observant among those in Springfield that
the lively young lady held him captive
Engagements at that time, and in that
s,ntty nov vxofF
as they were made, and it is not at all i'm
possible that Miss Todd and Mr. Lincoln
were betrothed many months before any
other than Mrs. Edwards and Mr.. Speed
knew of 1t. AT this time was the case
till Lincoln was elected to the presidency,
his one'special rival In Illinois was Stephen
A. Douglas.
Mr.. Douglas had more of the social graces
than Mr.. Lincoln. and it appeared to him
that nothing would be more interesting
than to cut out his political rival in the
affections of the entertaining and lively
Miss Todd. and SO he paid her court. A
spirited young lady from Kentucky, at
that time in Illinois, would have been al
most less than human If she had refused
to accept the attentions Of the two leading
men Of the locality. Therefore, Miss Todd
being quite human, encouraged Douglas,
and again there was what nowadays would
have been called Irritation. This course
of action did not spur Lincoln on in his de-
votion. but made him less ardent, and he
break off the engagement OF this Lamon
relates
"At length. after long reflection in great
agony of spirit. Mr.. Lincoln concluded that
duty required him to make a candid state
ment of his feelings to the lady who was
entitled to his hand. He wrote her let
ter and told her gently but plainly that he
did not love her. He asked Speed to de-
liver 1t, but Speed advised him to burn it.
Speed said Mr.. Lincoln, I always knew
you were an obstinate man. If you won't
deliver 1t will get some one else to do it,
But Speed now had the letter in his hand,
and, emboldened by the warm friendship
that existed between them, replied, I shall
not deliver it nor give 1t to you to be de-
livered. Words are forgotten. misunder-
stood, passed by. not noticed in a private
conversation; but once put your words in
writing and they stand as a living and
eternal monument against you. If you
think you have will and manhood enough
to go and seek her and speak to her what
you say In that letter, you may do that
Lincoln went to see her forthwith and re-
ferred to Speed She told him she knew
the reason of his change of heart, and re-
leased him from his engagement. Some
parting endearments took place between
them, and then, as a natural result of
those endearments. a reconciliation
The Bridegroom Was Missing.
Mr.. Lincoln was never, 1t appears, en-
tirely happy after this reconciliation, and
grew quite moody and depressed. The
biographers who treat at length of the sub
ject declare that his mind turned back to
Anne Rutledse, and the memory of her
shrouded his heart in gloom. To all save
Speed he was silent as to the cause of his
melancholy, but he could not hide 1t. Miss
Todd's sister. Mrs. Edwards, counseled
that the engagement should be broken or
that the marriage should be indefinitely
postponed. Other advice prevailed and
preparations were made for the wedding,
which was to take place January ], 1871.
The wedding feast was prepared. the
guests were assembled, the bride was
ready for the ceremony. but the bride
groom did not come.
After several hours he was found by his
friends-beside himself with melancholy,
with modification and with shame. 1t was
evident that he was no longer responsible
for his own actions. His friends endeav-
ored to cheer him up. but he was incon-
solable. They therefore watched him that
no harm might come to him from his own
hands. His friend Speed. writing Of this
time many years later thus alluded to 1t:
I'm the winter of 1S41 gloom came over
him till his friends were alarmed for his
life. Though a member Of the legislature,
he rarely attended its sessions. In his
deepest gloom, and when I told him he
would die unless he rallied, he said. I am
not afraid, and would be more than willing,
but have an irrepressible desire to live
till l can be assured that the world Is a
10 hc,tf tor \ ,ir,rrI To- IN