Martinsburg independent. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1875-1900, 1895-04-13
THE BOOK AGENTS RoUr.
He Met Woman Who Gould Tar
Faster Than He Gould.

A man with small valise and
persuasive voice invaded q house on
the west side tho other day and in
troduced himself as follows;
81 have secured the agency for
this city, ma'am, Of 4 work which |
should like TO show you. 1t is en-
titled 'The Modern Housewives
Friend, Companion and guide 1t
contains upward of $3.50 recipes in
Guiding specific directions for
"Isn't your name PlunkettN in
terrupted the woman of the house,
who had been studying his features
as if trying TO remember where she
had seen him before.
mo, madam, he replied, my name
is Harris"
"You look like a family used to
know down near Fairyiew. The
Plunketts were related to the Van
Arsdales-everybody called them
Van Osdolls-and I'm not sure but
they were second cousins Of the
Gaddises. Ever been in FairView?"
mo, ma'am. Now this work, as
was saying, contains directions for
doino all kinds OF needlework, all
descriptions off,
DWELL, it does beat me! I'd met
you any where on the street, | should
have been just as sure you we're
Aaron Plunkett as | am that I'm
standing kere. Your voice is exactly
like his; you're about his size and
heft; yau wear your whiskers tho
same way he used 20, and'-
Il dare say. don't think l ever
heard of him, though. Now
"Never heard of Aaron Plunkett?
Why, he was the man that kept a
tavern on the road to-ob, forgot. |
You said you were never IN
"No never was there" broke in
the caller, becoming slightly impa-
tent "You will Gnd in this work
full and complete directions for
making toilet soap
"I've tried that. It's 4 good deal
cheaper to buy it. When | lived IN
Fairview, there was a peddIer came
round one day with recipe for max
ing toilet soap. He claimed he had
sold it to the Suydams, andthe Pun
yeas, and the Sperlings, and the
Shreyeses, and the Piersols and some
of the other ncighbors, and bought
it of him, and it cost me Sl.75 to
make a lot of soap l could have
bought for
"But that's only enc thing out of
thousands in this book, madam.
You can make your own confection-
ery'-
"I'ye tried that too. You Ought
to have seen Sine Powelson laugh at
a lot of candy l made once by fol-
lowing directions in a book. l can
make as good moIasses candy as
anybody, but when I want the fancy
kinds I always go and buy EN-. It's
the cheapest and hest way in the
long run"
'In this book you will learn how
to make and fit childrcn's gar
ments'-
Gland! We haven't any children
but what's able to get their own
clothes. There's six of them, and
they're all boys. The youngest is Is,
and be clerks in clothing store. He
was coming home the other night |
and slipped and fell. Sprained his
knee, and it swelled up that big [
was afraid it was going to be so stiff
he never could use it again. l rubbed
liniment and goose grease on his
knee for more than an hour by the
watch, and it got better. l tell you,
there's nothing like goose grease
when you want to take the solness
out of swelled joint. But you've
got TO be sure you have the genuine
thing. There's lots of stuff they call
goose grease that's nothing but lard.
The best way is TO render it out your
self. Go and buy a..goose. Pick out
a fat one. 1t won't make any differ
ence how old it is, 80 it is fat. Take
that goose and
MADAM" gasped the man with
the valise, backing hastily out OF
the door, " I give it upl"-ChicAgo
Tribune.