St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1895-04-16
CONVICT'S WILL.
Luxuries and Articles of Virtu
Gix-RII EHnalx

Luxuries and Articles of Virtu
Given Away Freely.
In the last issue of the Prison Mir
ror appeared the last will and tesla
ment of a pardoned convict. 1t will
bear reprinting:
Being of sound mind and physically
able to get away with three square
meals per diem, and realizing that
within a reasonable period of time
from the date hereof, l am to be, by
virtue of executive clemency'' or other
wise. translated from the death that
has surrounded me during the sixteen
months last passed, into life beyond
the borders of this tomb, and having
during the entombment aforesaid be-
come possessed, in fee simple by rea-
son of purchase, presentation or other
, wise. Of certain and divers goods, chat
tells, personal property, etc., as fol-
lows: Ito witt
One % nickel clock of the construc-
ton called New Railway"
1t may be said of this clock that it's
name is well applied, for, barring a
little freak of fast-mail service, its
equal for speedy action / have never
seen; 1t will easily out-travel the edi-
tors jaw, and give him the advantage
or down grade. 1t is my firm convic-
tion that, if given a fair chance, it
VIII easily make two and one-half DAYS
on any ordinary working day, between
the rising or the sun and the going
oo~n thereof. What it might be able
10 perform on Sunday is past computa-
.ioh. ms CLOCK l give and bequeath
10 the occupant of Cell 2OS, only eau
tlonlng him not to let said clock fool
nm INTO the idea that his time has
o~pireu Iull SIX months before the
date set by law.
Next in order comes pair of Slip
peis' the FABRIC OF these slippers is
not SO costly as other slippers that /
nave seen, neither is their construc-
ton of that peculiar grace and beauty
mat we all love to see; but they are
comfortable, that is, when covering a
NO. foot. What they might prove in
case OF being bestowed on an indiyid-
ual with a No. foot, is problema teal:
IL might destroy their usefulness: the
strain on them would probably be as
great as 1t Is sometimes known to be on
a half gallon jug when your grocer. in.
slsts on forcing whole gallon of mo-
lasses into it. Being puzzled as TO
whom to bequeath this legacy, 1 shall
leave 1t to the best judgment of the
executor of this instrument.
Next comes piece of soap, of the
style denominated tar" it is not q
full cake, neither is it the minimum
part thereof, but just good. stable
chunk such as fits the hand to perfec-
tlon This chattel / desire to beuueath
TO the occupant of Cell No. 413, with
the suggestion, that notwithstanding
the excellence of the aforesaid piece of
soap 1t should not be treated to per-
form the difficult task of washing
MIN over the wall of freedom"
Lastly, there are divers and sundrv
picture cards, some of them being of
the vintage of 1894 while still others
have come into the possession of the
said mo. $780, at a more recent date
1t is my desire that these cards. to-
gether with the receptacle in which
they are contained, should fall to the
snare or the occupant of Cell No 400,
ana further, this testator sayeth not.
except that it is his desire, and that he
hereby requests the captain of the cell
mouse to act without remuneration as
the executor of this instrument; and it
Is further stipulated and agreed to by
THIS testator, that said executor shall
De forever exempt from making any re-
port or statement as to his disposition
OF the goods, chattels, personal prop
erty, ETC., of this testator, either by
writing or orally, either to the said
testator or to any other whomsoever.
1t is suggested by the testator, that
this instrument be shown to the editor
OF the Prison Mirror, and should he
show no signs of insanity or profanity,
that he be allowed to publish the same
without pay and placed in such posi-
ton in said paper as he in his discre-
ton may choose.
Given under my hand
this I'd day of April, 1895. IT. No. 1896.
Without witnesses.