The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1895-05-03


Fort Dearborn. No doubt the scenes were
oftentime wildly recalled up to the DAY
of their death.
German tries to get even with Rayner
b. insinuating that the latter is disgrun-
tied because he failed TO get the Great
I AIMS support in his gubernatorial can
didacv. This weak effort at retaliation
is unworthy Of one so much at nome III
statecraft.
An American who went all the way
to Constantinop'e to see the Sultan was
disappointed in his object because OF a
boil on the royal nose. The American
could not finger. so he came back home
boiling mad. and will not go there any
more"
Doctor Chauncey Multiloquent Depe~
says the next national issue will be hard
times and good times; that the Repuoh-
cans want nothing better. OF course
They ought to be satisfied with hard
times when they are responsible for it.
--
carl Browne has discarded the SOM
brero and buckskin coat for a plug hat
and frock coat The metamorphosis is
unexplained. but the apostle OF reincarna-
ton knows. lie has been 10 Philadelphia,
where there are free baths.
Secretary Hoke Smith, in classifying the
people Of this country into gold mono
mctallists. silver monometallists, and BIZ
metallists, hasn't done the proper thing
by Mrs. Lease and General Coxey.
The literary fame ghouls are early at
work. Now they are trying to rob Du
Maurier Of the credit of originating Tril-
by. 1t may be a scheme. however. 10 re-
vive interest in tho waning craze.
Pity but what President Zelaya could
accidentally get British bullet in his
jaw la Ii Hung Chang That would
be the eesiest way out Of that smart
money"
Talleyrand once said that language was
oilS means OF ui7buiHiN7 'i''N7'''-
Gresham ought to have put this in his
Monroe doctrine pacihcation circular.
Senator Stewart is a free silver man
who places a gold obligation in all Of his
business agreements. Sincerity, thou art
an urchased phantom in politics
rph IA IL n
juicy American apples Every year lot
Of the choicest picked fruit is sent to her
from Albemarle county Va.
A great telephone and telegraph war
in the near future is predicted II will
be a merry one for the newspaper owners.
who will forbear In silence.
How did Denver find out that a fellow
named Ncdier wrote a Trilby in 1871?
Mark Twain can add this one to his list
of thirteen original jokes.
Pluvius is a little hard on the turfmen,
baseballsts. and May Queens. especially
the latter. for the two former we have
with us all summer.
Rises in tho prices of straw hats and
wall paper is the latest. II is presumed
that the recent war in China is the direct
cause Of this.
Gresham's Monroe doctrine educational
circular recalls the frontier hotel sign:
Don't shoot the pianist; he's doing the
best he can"
Sacred history is repeating itself The
Chinese Emperor refuses TO believe that
Admiral Ting is a suicide until he sees
the body.
The anti-nudity bill before the New
York Legislature received only a bare
majority, and under the Constitution was
lost.
1t is presumed mat Gresham's Monroe
doctrine circular is for the especial cdi-
fication of the New York Assemblymen.
1t is feared that the unusual large num-
Der of spring weddings will cause a rise
in the price Of rice and old shoes
Nicaragua will ante UP. but she refuses
TO look cheerful.
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frha poot Esfo.a Xoudofa