The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1895-04-17
All Sorts of Paragraphs.

NOAo UhASh Az obSSA0sSAJ PseAS 80
said to be "a carats fine.
- Only one-half of children born
reach the age of II years.
Men are often called good be-
cause they have not been found out.
On a summer day the average
healthy adult perspires about % oun-
ces.
- Mt. Tacoma is the highest point
in the United States-about $4,000
feet.
- The man who assiduously courts
trouble will in the end be married to
| it.
Remember that religion in busi-:
ness is just as important as religion in.
the Church.
The man who swears has some
thing in his heart that the devil wants
to stay there.
The fellow who undertakes to
eight the devil with fire" is sure to.
get lickin'.
Folks who are always growing at
this world are too scared to hire .. bal
loon and get out of it.
1t is considered unlucky in Ire
land to view funeral procession while
the beholder is under an umbrella.
Gus de Smith-Miss Ella, may i
hope to win you? Miss Ella-Why,
Mr.. de Smith, do you think I'm 10 be;
rafaed ?
- Mrs. Moses-I have made up my
mind, John, to join the sufragists.
Mr.. Moses-Heavens, and I'll be the
sufferer !
= Mrs. Gadzley-"Do you suffer
much from toothache ?" Mrs. Blaz-
zer-'sNo-that is, not unless my hus:
band has it. e
Never suppose that in any possi-}
BILE situation or under any circum-s
stances it is best for you to do q dis
honorable thing.
of every 10000 clergymen be-
tween 45 and IS, Is die annually
among 10000 M. DIS of the same age,
fraction over %. ~
The first Bible printed in the
point alphabet for the blind has just
been issued in Louisville, KY IT.
contains 1889 pages.
If Mr.. and Mrs. Asa Cowden, OF
Amesbury, Mass, live until next
May they will celebrate their 9Th
marriage anniversary.
= It is the close observation Of lit
tie things which is the secret OF suc-s
cess in business, in art, in science and
in every pursuit in life.
She-tYou never give me candy
and flowers as you did before we were
married." He-'No, but I manage
to give you pie three times week.
Newspaper Editor--Juan, take
that cat away. I cannot write with
the row it is making. Where is it2s
Juan-Why, sir, you are sitting on it.
= One Of the lessons Of life which
many people never learn is that it is
not necessary to make fool Of one
self because one has magnificent OPP
portunity.
"A New York halter who sskeeps
his finger on the hat pulse of the
world" says that the men Of the United
States spend $500, 100000 year for /,
headgear.
= Blobbs-"Do you think the
average man is as stupid before ne
marries as he is afterwards p Cyni-
cus-"gertainly, or he wouldn't get
married"
Women nowadays are generally
acknowledged to be an inch or two
taller, and are two or three inches
greater in chest development, than
their grandmothers were.
"A curious burial custom exists in
Assum. All corpses are lowered from
the roofs with ropes, it being con-
trary to the laws of the country to
carry dead body through D door.
= Mrs. Marketmade (patronizingly)
-"And you not married yet, Hulda?
Really, I think the men must be
blinds Hulda-"That's what Aunt
Maria said when you were married.
- If the lava and ashes volnited
from Vesuvius since A. D. 79 could
be modelled into bricks there would be
sufficient number to make city as
large as New York and London COM
bined.
= The Imperial Canal of China was
begun in the year $50 A. D. and not
completed until 1850. It is 200
miles in length, and is by long odds
the most important artificial waterway
on earth.
- A boy who could not understand
what conscience meant was at last
asked: "What is it that gives you an
uncomfortable feeling when you have
done something wrong p "Dad's
cane" was the reply.
-"But, papa" pleaded the impas-
stoned maiden, che is the only man |
love p "That's right" replied the
brutal old man. 'T am glad that
daughter of mine does not love more
than one man at time.
"Colonel, what would you do if
man called you a liar? I mean
friend 2" "Well, sub, if he were q
real near and dear friend, I would
show him the respect of attending his
funeral after it all were over, sub.
-"You dom t tell me that I am the
prettiest woman at the"reception, as
you used to-" pouted Mrs. Snaggs.
''No," replied her husband "you
must remember that I joined the
church only two weeks ago."
"A San Francisco girl, disappoint-
ed in love years ago, has built q cabin
in the woods on the Upper Salmon
river and lives there alone. She is an
expert hunter and has raised pair OF
grizzly bears, which are very affection
ate toward her.
1t will be an agreeable surprise to
persons subject to attacks OF bilious
collie to learn that prompt relief may
be had by taking Chamberla 8 Collie,
Cholera and Diarrhee Remedy. In
many instances the attack may be pre-
vented by taking this remedy as soon
n