Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1895-09-16
AN INNOCENT PARSON.
HIS ATTEMPT TO DESCRIBE A RAM
FIGHT IN RING vERNAcULAR.
The Bride ventured o Suggestion Which
Caught On-The Preacher Didn't Fully
Succeed In Appearing Unsophisticated.
The Little Rams Ring Tactics.

Succeed In Appearing Unsophisticated.
The Little Rams Ring Tactics.
A preacher told this story at a we'd
ding supper on the South Side the other
evening:
II was riding along country road
near Bloomington, he said, when I
noticed group of sheep in pasture,
There was a large open space in the
midst Of the flock, and at either end Of
the space stood a ram In the center.
but standing little at one side. was o
third ram. The two rams had evidently
had a falling out about something, or
else they had come to settle in friend
~ contest which was the better ram.
Ram No. 3 seemed to be acting as
| judge, umpire-what do you call it?
Referee? Yes, that's it, the third ram
was the referee. 1 don't know under
what rules the meeting took place. 1t
may have been Queensberry or Rosebery.
You see am not up to these technical
| matters.
when all the preliminaries had been
| arranged and both contestants had been
! cautioned apparently that there was to
be no 'fouling'-I think l have seen
| that word in the newspapers occasional
| y, and therefore 1 suppose it is cor
rect word to use iii this connection
| each backed off to the farthest limits of
the circle, which, by the way, was not
| 4 squared circle. The referee stepped
| out Of the way, and the rams dashed to-
ward each other. When their heads
| came together, there was q terrific crash,
| and the force Of the conclusion threw
them as far apart as the length of this
| table. I"
All the guests looked the full length
of the table from the passion flowers at
enc end to the brides cake in the far
perspective, and then at the preacher in
| the middle distance, but nobody said
anything.
| "Then," continued the preacher,
"they took their places, apparently none
| the worse for the encounter. Again, evil
| IDENTIFY at a preconcerted signal from the
referee, they dashed together. This time
the shock was even moro terrific than
|
them went back to his-ah, what do
they call it, corner?-he was little un-
steady on his legs
| "GroSgy!" veutured the bride.
Il believe that is the technical term, {"
replied the preacher, although, as
| have intimated, am not at all familiar
with sporting phraseology. When time
was called for the third round-ahem-
| that is, I mean to say when the rams
| had recovered strength for third col
lision there was another rush, n
| crash, and ono of the rams, tho one you
so APPLY described as 'groggy' with an
| acknowledgment to the bride) fell to
his knees. His adversary did not seem
inclined TO follow up his advantage, but
| possibly he may have been restrained by
the rules of the meeting. At any rate,
after contemplating his fallen foe grave
| ly for . moment he walked back to his
place. The other ram, after resting
briefly, struggled to his feet. The third
ram-the one have called the referee
looked at him rather inquirinSly, as
it seemed TO me, but the warrior show
| ed no sign Of recognition. He ambled
to his side of the ring and faced about.
A murmur of some sort seemed to 30
through the flock. The odds were ap-
parently 3 to l in favor of the other
ram-that is to say, it seemed to be the
| general opinion that tho ram with the
weak knees had been outclassed, as the
other one was decidedly the heavier of
| the two.
However, the smaller ram seemed
| to have wonderful recuperative powers
When the proper interval had elapsed,
he came up smiling, as it We're even
| thought I could see q twinkle in his eye,
| for was quite close to the fence. and
this thing took Place only q little dis
lance away. As the referee stepped back
| from the center of the ring, where he
! kept his position between the meetings,
the other two rams drove at each other
| pellmell AT the very instant when
| their hard horns would have met, how
| ever, the smaller ram suddenly changed
| his course to the right, and the other
went through the ranks like catapult.
just as he turned aboS, evidently
| boiling ever with indignation at the
trick which had been played Oh him,
the other one, with the aCtt!ed force given
by a longer run from one side of the cir
Gle to a point several feet outside Of it,
where the larger rams momentum had
carried him, sho: at him like cannon
ball, striking him full in the face and
driving him several feet away, where
he lay limp and helpless The third
ram, who was promptly on the spot. as
suppose every competent referee should
be, nodded his head several times-in-
deed it looked to me as if lie was count
ing-and then the fallen ram failing to
rise the whole flock marched away to-
ward knoll in another part of the
meadow with the victorious ram at the
head. Presently the defeated ram got
on his feet and made his way to a Sc
cluded spot down by little run, where
l saw him reclining in the shade of a
large willow tree as rode away"
| What an interesting study natural
history is" said the brides grandmoth-
er as she adjusted her glasses.
/ a. t.