davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1895-04-25

Sir Bedivere, the most famous st.
Bernard dog in the world, died at
Little Rock, Ark, last week. Two
years ago the dog sold for $4,000.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1895-04-25
BRIEFS.

,.-,s About This and That of Local
Short Hs s,,,or TO Please Our Readers.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Killed by a Black Canada LYNX

Ernest Rogers was walking in the
woods near Frewsburg, n. Y, the other
day, when he heard his dogs in savage
combat with something. He hurried to
the spot with an ak and got there in
time to see one of his dogs ripped open
and hurled ten feet away by the ami
NAL they We're fighting. The battle was
going on in the cavity made by the up
turned roots of a tree, and the wild ami
NAL had backed under the roots. The
remaining dog made a dash for it, and
the animal, of a kind that Rogers had
never seen before, sprang out and
closed with him. This gave Rogers his
opportunity and he knocked the ami
mails brains out with the AK 1t was
much bigger than a wildcat, nearly
black, with claws two inches long and
very sharp, a stumpy tail, and long,
erect tufts on the tips of it's ears. Rog-
ers dragged the animal to the village
where it was pronounced black Cana
da lynx. This is an animal rarely seen
out of it's native Canadian woods. 1t
weighed forty-eight pounds. 1t killed
one dog outright and would have made
short work of the other but for the
timely arrival of Rogers and his ak.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
The Problem Solved.

Mrs Ruiem-Your husband is still
as devoted as lover. / don't see how
you manage.
Mrs. kissern-It's very simple. When
he comes home late, l always pretend
to be asleep: when he has a. headache
in the morning, | tell him he is over
worked: when he leaves his hat in the
parlor. his overcoat in the dining room
and his overshoes upstairs, l quietly
gather them up and put them in the
front hall; and when we go to the
theater, | never forget to suggest that
ne should improve the shining hours
between the acts by going out and
talking business with his customers.
Oh, it's easy enough to keep a man de.
voted, if You only know how.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
A Business Woman

Pretty Girl-Are you Miss Bacllbay's
waiting maid?
Maid-Yes'm.
Miss BaclSbay is a great heiress
from Boston, isn't she?"
She is"
"And very much sought after?"
"Well, yes
Il presume so. Well, if you will
give me the addresses of her gentle
men admirers, l will be very much
obliged"
Dear me, What for?"
II am selling encyclopedias"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Spiikins' Character.

Rev. Dogood-No man is so bad that
there is not little of the angel left IN
him.
Robson-GuesS that's so. Remem-
Der Spilllins? Every body thought he
was about the worst man on earth.
Why, his own mother wouldn't come
to his funeral. Well, sir, I've been
told a thousand times a month for the
last five years that Spilkins was the
only real saint that ever lived.
My goodness
Il married Spilkins' widow"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
THE CARLSBAD OF AMERICA.
What Major Tyson of Erie, Pa, Says
About Hot Springs, S. ID.

left Erie, Pa, About Nov. LIST, 1894, sur
rounded by my friends who very much
doubted my return in better health, and
arrived at Hot Springs, S. d., SO weak and
disheartened that required aid to leave
the cars and reach the hotel
The first few weeks | felt no improve
ment, then | experienced a change which
continued until my departure Ireturned
to my home very much stronger and al
most free from pain.
l do not hesitate to say to anyone seek1
ing relief from pain that believe there is
no place where an invalid will feel the ben
efts of the curative powers of the waters,
the pure air the grand mountain scenery
and the hospitable treatment more than at
Hot Springs, South Dakota. An elegant
hotel with every provision for comfort and
all that goes to make one feel at home, can
be found there. VIM w. TYSON,
Commander Penn. Soldiers and Sailors
Home, Erie, Pa.
Send to j. Francis, G. P. A., Burlington
Route, Omaha, Neb., for a beautifully
illustrated folder, descriptive Of Hot
Springs.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Briareus Had a Hundred Arms.

Nervousness has as many queer symptoms.
But whatever these may be. they one and all
depart in consequence of the soothing. inyig-
Grating influence of Hostetter's Stomach Bit
ters which tones the system through the
medium of thorough digestion and assimila-
ton. Tremulous nerves soon acquire steadi-
ness by its use. 1t promotes sleep and APP
petite and fortities the system against disease.
Malaria, constipation. rheumatism and kid
ney troubles are relieved by il.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Some Caution Necessary.

First Burglar-Everything is fixed.
You an me is to enter the house an
bring out the things, and Bill an Jim
will be on the outside, with four or
five wagons to load 'em in.
Second Burglar (doubtfully)-Better
not get more'n four wagons. I'm
afraid five might attract the attention
of the perlice.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Hoods SarsapariI|a

Removes the cause by purifying and enriching
the blood, giving to it just those qualities
which are demanded for the proper support
of the nervous system. Hundreds of women
who once suffered from nervousness, write
that they have taken Hoods Sarsaparllla and
nervousness has disappeared. This was be-
cause Hoods Sarsaparilla purified their blood.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
A Question of Service.

IL hardly know what to make of the new
minister said the King of Mbwpka to his
forty wife.
AS usual, woman's aptitude for estimat-
ing man at his true value came to the
front
Suppose you make a stew of him." she
suggested, and it was done. That is to say
the stew was done.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

An advertisement in a New York
daily stated that "a one-legged man
would learn of something to his advan-
tage'' by calling at a certain address
A curious individual called and met the
advertiser, a man who had lost his
right leg. He said: IF I can find a
man who has lost the other leg and
wears the same size shoe that / do we
can whack up, and by buying our
shoes together we would save consider
able
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Remembered Her Father.

Clara-I never saw such beautiful
collection of Christmas presents Did
you give your father anything?
Dora-Why, of course. You don't
suppose Id forget my own darling
father, do you?
What did you give him?"
"A perfectly lovely little gold pen to
sign checks with.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

,haverly-Do you think there is any
cnance OF the detectives catching the
burglar who broke into your house,
Austen-No, not much. They only have
a very faint clew.
Haverly-What is it,
.Austen-The burglar only left behind
him photograph of himself, with his
name and address on it.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Wanted Another.

Tramp--About year ago came by and
you gave me an old vest You may not
know it, madam, but there was a $25 note
in that vest.
Lady of the House-Mercy Have you
brought it back!
Tramp-Not much! I've come for
another vest.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
A Short Term Impress.

Binks-Oh, yes, she carries herself
like an empress, and bosses me around
all she likes now; but wait until we
and cringe.
Winks-To you?
Binksr-No: to the servant girl.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
HOw's Thisf

We cfer 500 reward for any case of
catarrh that can not be cured by Halls
catarrh cure.
Ohio.
We the undersigned, have known F. j.
Cheney for the last fifteen years, and be-
heve him perfectly honorable in all bust
ness transactions and financially able to
carry out any obligations made by their
ledo, Ohio.
Waldlng, Kinman & Marvin, wholesale
druggists, Toledo, Ohio.
Halls Catarrh cure is taken internally,
acting directly upon the blood and mu-
cuous surfaces or the system. Price, IS
cents per bottle. Sold by all druggists.
Testimonials free
Halls family pills, 25 cents.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
STRONG NERVES

Depend upon pure, rich, red, nourishing,
strength giving blood. The nerves derive
their sustenance from the blood, aud when
they are weak it is because they do not re-
ceive the nourishment needed. The true
cure for nervousness will not be found in
opiate or sedative compounds. These only
allay the symptoms.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Tit for Tat.

He-Be honest, now! You know we'll
enough that very few women have any
sense.
She-l admit it; yet it is in a measure
blessing. If they had sense very few men
would be able to marry
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
A Startling Proposition

McGuire-''If be after leaving security
equal ter what l take away, will yer thrust
me till mkt wake?"
Sands (the grocer ''Certainlyw
McGuire-"Well, thin, sell me two av
tnlm hams, an kape wan av thin till /
come aginn
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

What do you think was the present
Blbbs gave to the fellow that married his
ex-wife?"
u haven't the least idea. What was it,"
~ "Gave him gold medal for bravery.
Cow, what do you think of that"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

MY wife suffered many years with various
troubles, severe headaches, debility, nervous
ness, indigestion and dyspepsia. She has
been treated by different doctors, and tried
different remedies, but
Hoods SarsaparIiIa Has Done More. --,
for her than anything else. We consider
Hoods Sarsaparilla most indispensable
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
a Mean Man.

Misunderstanding about mean men,
do you know Binkers?
Minkers--Is he mean?
Winkers-Mcan! Mean is no name
for it, Why, that fellow is mean
enough to put his name on an UNI
brella.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Not Unreasonable.

Boy-Iou are advertisin' fer an err
rand boy?
Skinner (of Skinner & Co. )-Yes, we
have a vacancy.
Hours long,"
you'll have to work sixteen hours
I day"
YES"
And You must have a bicycle, so as
20 save time"
I've got one. How about pay?"
"Nell, we'll pay you-let-me-
sce--'
Say, mister, make it enough to
keep the bicycle in repair, won't you?"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

medicine for family use, and for all dis
orders caused by torpid liver and impure
blood, in fact it is wonderful health re-
storer to the whole system. Hoods Sar-
saparilla has proved itself in my wife's
case, and we can faithfully recommend itsy
use in every family" JACOB RoMMEL, Nor
risOn, Missouri.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
The Worm Turns,

Emancipated Woman $1,000 - My
dear.
Uncmaucipated Husband (timidly)-
Ies'm.
Emancipated Woman (sternly)-
Your hat bill is perfectly outrageous!
The idea of paying So for that bit of
shoddy stiffened over block If you
were not a mere butterfly of fashion,
and the very personification of extrav-
agance, you would let your hair grow
long and go without hat, as the foot
ball players do.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
The Final Question.

Chinese Emperor (nervously)-What
news?
Official-Japan is now anxious for
peace.
Emperor (gloomily)-Y-e-s, but how
Dig piece?
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

Little Dot-Oh, that's just so folks
will know they can afford to keep one.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
THE TALMAGE SERMON
THE GREAT PREACHER DE-
NOUNCES DIVORCE.
What Therefore God Hath Joined To-
gether Let No Man Put Asunder"--
Congress Should Look After the Sew
eral State Laws.

HAT THERE ARE
hundreds and thou
sands of infelicitous
homes in America
no one will doubt.
If there were only
one skeleton in the
closet, that might
be locked up and
abandoned; but in
many a home there
is a skeleton in the
hallway and a skel-
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Good as a Coat of Arms.

Little Ethel-Why is it womens Is
always complainin' about the hired
girl?
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

The man who has taken God for his
strength is always strong when he is
weak
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

Truth and liberty are inseparable COM
panions; neither can live long apart from
the other
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
At the Club.
Of the perli'

cav, I say, Regi, what will we do
for tobacco when we die?"
"Oh. | guess we will smoke to-
gethern
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

Hoods Pills G Gsss f head issE Ills ss bilious
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

.The clothing of the women of the sultan
of Turkey costs s., 800, 600 year, so it is
said
The worlds telegraph lines aggregate
i,069, 1913 miles.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21
Hoods Pills H fft dRsE snfsapara With 18th
We would not have expended
HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF doll lars

uOIHg guaranteeing Tor Which made charge
there not been merit Gavanzng onssts in coating the
strong but most perishabe Gin thin with
the almost ndest uctble when very thin metals zinc
and aluminium II there great galyanizing
no one would for galvanized
iron than ungavanized costs If making painted
wndmills to-day should furnish an
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

A
is { |
notC|
ing
Low
nins|
stol' |
dist
afte |
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-03-21

And you must have bicycle, so as
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-06-27
Engine for Cutting DcWeiry.

In Los Angeles, III Il jewelry store. a
three horsepower mOtor is used in the
cutting Of precious stones. The ma
chine worked by the rotor is described
as Il new invention, and is said to be
the only II of the kind in the country.
In the old method of cutting the stone
was centered on the end of a stick or
piece of brass and held by the end on
the grinding lap. In the electrically
driven machine the stone is held by II
quadrant. which is adjusted by a set
screw to its required position on the lap.
AS many rs sixty stones can. it is stat
ed. be cut at one time. and the method
of adjustment is so accurate that in no
case would there be the slightest posi-
bility Of Overgrinding. wen if an at
tendant We're to leave the machine to
look after other duties. This enables
the cutting to be done with certainty
and minutencSs. The QUadrants are
all indoXed TO eat any style of stone.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-06-27
Is This q New E.dihIr Gvnin?

A highly important discovery. the
final result of which is causing a great
deal OF speculation. has been made nj
Pittsboro. Russell County. Ala. The
common swamp cau2S-the ones used
for fishing poleS-:tre fairly loaded
down with grain. corresponding in
shape and taste to the cat. The grains
are two or three times as large as oat
grain and contain a germ or Starchy
substance very pleasant to the taste.
Horses eat the grain in preference to
corn or oats. Hogs fatten on it readily
and chickens devour ii with avidity.
Not in the history of civilized man has
Il single edible grain been developed.
The cereals, as far AS history shows,
are as Old as maj himself. If the dis
covery just made is to lead to the de-
velopment Of Il new edible grain 1T will
mark Il wonderful epoch in the history
Of man.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-06-27
Religious Texts as Advertisement

Religious Texts as advertisements.
A wealthy religious man of Glasgow,
Scotland, recently requested of the
street a companies the privilege of
printing Scripture texts on the back of
the tickets used by the workingmen in
the commission hours. But no sooner
was the privilege extended to him than
the car companies got into hot water.
They were charged with discriminating
against the w%orkingmen by assuming
that they needed texts more than the
people who used the cars at other hours
of the day. They tried to explain the
matter, but it was Of no use. And to
settle the difficulty they were obliged
to print the Scripture texts as though
they were paid advertisements. SO
now the texts are printed like this:
Come unto me ali We that weary and
are heavy laden. IT." Pure religion
and indebted before God and the faith
err is this: TO visit the fatherlcss and
the widows in their atiliction. and to
keep himself unspotted from the world.
Adv"
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-06-27
KNOWLEDGE

Brings comfort ard improvement and
tends to personal enjoyment when
rightly used. The many, who live bet
ter than others and enjoy life more, with
less expenditure, by more promptly
adapting the worlds best products to
thc'needs of physical being, will attest
the value to health Of the pure liquid
laxative principles embraced in the
remedy, Syrup %f Figs.
Its excellenccSis due to its presenting
in the form most acceptable and pleas
ant 70 the taste, the refreshing and truly
beneficial properties of perfect lax-
alive; cnectually cleansing the system,
dispclling colds, headaches and feyers
and permanently curing constipation.
II has given satisfaction to millions and
net with the approval OF the medical
profession, because it acts on the Kid
neys, Liver and Bowels without weak
eniug them and it is perfectly free from
every Objectionable substance.
Syrup of Figs is for sale by all drug.
gists in SOC and 81 bottles, but it is man
ufactured by the California Fig Syrup
Co. only, whose name is printed on every
package, also the name, Syrup of Figs,
and being we'll Informed, you will not
accent any substitute if offered.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-06-27
Rare Honor for a Woman.

The alumni of Cornell University
have nominated Miss Mary Carey
elected in June. This is probably the
first time in the history of any Of the
leading universities that a oma has
been named for trustee. Miss Thomas
was graduated from Cornell in 1877 and
is now president of Bryn Mawr College
for Women. She was made dean Of
that college when is was opened in 1885
and was elected president in 1893.
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-06-27
Worse than War.

Il tell you what, Sophia, I reckon
some Of the men that fit in our war, an
got titles by SO dom, would be glad to
see the days O. battle an blood sheddin'
back agin, turrible though they was"
remarked Uncle Wilson Flanders, as
he laid down the evening paper and
wiped his spectacles.
why, what curious things you do
say, Wilson," returned Mrs. Flanders,
calmly. II s'pose they Jest live on their
pension money, and rejoice In peace,
most Of EN-"
mo, they DON'T" said Mr.. Flanders;
they have to work like all possessed,
any number Of 'em. Why, here's a man
here, jest listen to this" and the old
mar caught up the paper again and ran
his finger down u column. Here tits:
Change in the Postoffice. General De-
livery will be tent out from the main
office six times q day to all parts of the
city,
Now I'd jest like to have you put
your mind on that, Sophia. A general
us AihCit WOuil0Cu III LIS lCSS OE
somewheres-havin' to kerry letters all
over the city six times a day! Why,
there aint a boss In Creekville that has
to work like that! An ! don't s'pose
they pay him enough to let him ride in
them elekitral cars; an, anyway, l CAL
late the houses is set so near together
-cOmparative--that 'twouldn't scussly
pay him for gettln' Off an on 'em, which
l expect Is pooty dangerous business,
what with sparks flynn all round the
cars, as In curse they must.
II tell YOU" concluded Uncle Wilson,
warmly, IL shouldn't blame that man
If he was to banker for the days when
he marched an fit in the midst O. tur-
moils an u%pheavin's. reckon he
want a mite more wore out when night
come than he is now-nOt a mite!"
The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-06-27
FAILS TO PLEASE LOTT,
Calls the Acts of the Pilgrims u Little
Obscure Crime.

OOoSuIC NAiHuc
Pierre Lott, dreamer and painter in
words, has made a pilgrimage to Jeru-
salem and written q book recording his
impressions Of the Holy City. He was
not pleased by what he saw: "The day
of my departure came, and | rose and
wandered forth as one of those cloudy
mornings which mark the Judean
springtime was breaking. A little cor
tege Of self torturing penitents passed
before me, dragging their crosses over
the rough old pavements and followed
by a group Of women and early rising
vagabOnds. AS they vanished from
view and I prepared to bid ad!eu for
ever to the Holy City, which 1 had en-
tered so hopefully, a feeling Of intense
sadness at my unbelief oppressed me,
for the event which renewed the world.
and which, after 1900 years. draws yet
to Jerusalem exalted multitudes. who
drag themselves on their knees to press
their lips upon some stones. appeared
to me at that moment like a little OBJ
scure crime done in haste in the early
morning, in the midst Of a city whose
daily life vas scarcely troubled by it."
We shall 500 have a translation Of the
work in English. and the people who
enjoy Lofts rhapsodies will be enabled
to compare his portraiture of Palestine
with his tales of Africa. of CONSTANT
nople. and of the unique land of Nine.
ChrySlnthemum.