The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1895-05-11
PuNcENT PARAGRAPHS.


still?" well, he's still. but She isn't.
You see, they are married now. De-
troit Free Press.
No, it is not proper to speak of the
modern woman" as the woman OF
the age" Don't forget this.-Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
-Flapjack-"Glibly is quite talker,
isn't hep" Treacle-"Yes; but his hat
will get down over his mouth. Spring
field Union.
Are you the boss here?'' Mr..
Meekly-"Do I look like q man that
would allow his wife to getalong with
out cook?'-Chicago Inter Ocean.
-Carleton-"Didy you see much cham
payne flowing on your trip across the
ocean," Montauk-"No; but saw a
tremendous ice foe. brooklyn Eagle.
Love laughs at locksmiths, so they say,
But not at locks, that's plain,
For once grim wedlock shuts him in
He seldom laughs again.
Miss EIder--s'Of course don't be-
lieve them, but everybody tells me /
don't grow old Bit" Miss Sharpe
perhaps you would find it easier to
believe what they say to others -
Boston Transcript.
Miss Logan Square-sI suppose
thistle down is the lightest thing in
the world" Miss Diamond Street.
ibid You ever hear young Lighthead
try to talk?"-Philadelphia Inquirer.
-"Didn't you tell that young man
was out?" said the young woman. "Oi
did, miss" replied Bridget But he
towld me to come back an ak yez agin,
SOS to be sure Oh hadn't misundther-
stood his name."-Washington Star.
. -Bobbie-"What are descendants,
father?" Father-'Why, the people
who come after you. Presently Who
is that young man in the passage?"
Bobbie-"That's one of sisters de-
scendants come to take her for a drive"
81 wouldn't swear that way" said
the kind-looking old lady mildly.
"Bless your soul, ma'am, You couldn't.
1t takes years of truck drivin' to come
anywheres near it, responded the gen.
tleman whose team had ballzed across
the car track. Tribune.
Yes" said the Rev. Goodman, 81
SO that they can be understood and APP
preciated by even the dullest intellect.
Before delivering them in public in
variably recite them to myself IN. Y.
Herald.
-"Dthot's foine boy yez how, Pat"
"Yis-he's darlint." 'Does he bodth-
ers yez much by noight?" "Shum-
tonnes; but phin he sets up his poipes
Oh put him into me hod, an two turns
up an down the fcire eschape puts him
T. shape loike an angel.
Weekly.
The wayworn man had fallen in
the street in very good swoon. The
usual crowd gathered and the usual
man-who-knows-wh shouted:
''Stand back and give him air." The
wayworn man got up. "Air!" said he
with fine scorn. "Airt" When I amt
had nothin' but air fer three daysr'-
Indianapolis Journal.
-Spinner-sTt is a way with us
poets, when any calamity happens to
us, to weave it into verse. and thus do
our miseries make sweet though sad
pleasure for others" Prosy-"Say
rather you make your own miseries
seem slight in comparison with the
miseries you inflict upon others. -
Boston Transcript.
Two old pitmen recently met in q
Durham village and after the usual
salutations the one said to the other:
Its lang time since aa've seen We,
Ralphy. Hev ye put ony money away
for your aad age?" "Wey," was the
reply; "aa've not dyun so badly. If "a
ives to de tomorrow aa'd be worth four
pound ten a week. "-Tit-Bits.
"A little boy in this city, whose
mother was endeavoring to teach him
to be generous with his sister, has
profited by the lesson. The mother
would always say to him, whenever he
got anything: 'Give half of it to sis
ter" He usually did as he was told,
though not always with a very good
grace. Recently the little fellow got
sick, and it was then that his mothers
teaching bore fruit. She was endeav-
oring to administer dose of castor oil,
when the youngster generously ex-
claimed: "Give it all to sister, man.
uu. -OluCluudtl SOuuucIcldl 0dZetUe.
A Royal Widow.
Everything in relation to Russia is OF
great interest, now that the eyes of the
world are turned in that direction since
the death Of the late car. A writer in
one of the English magazines says:
''There is no provision made for the
widows of the czars and the grand
dukes of Russia, as in other countries
is done, and in consequence all the
widows of members Of the imperial
family are completely at the mercy of
the reigning emperor, who can do as
little or as much for them as he pleases.
The present widowed czarina is en-
tirely dependent on her son. heard
that on one occasion she told her ia
Their, the king OF Denmark, that she
knew, If ever she was left widow,
that he would allow her to occupy the
room she had used in her girlhood, and
xlox .L~~1I H. lo. Ao,vo-