Birmingham age-herald., 1895-05-05
THE CYCLONE"

Answering Fool Que estions.-We are in receipt of the following: "Mr. Editor, who is Bismarck, and what's his job? Old Citizen" We are sur prised that anybody in this age that subject. However. the Cyclone is here to enlighten and we cheerfully give the desired information. Bismarck, fa- miliarly called. Biz" was born in Bran- denburg 1st April. 1873, studied at Got tengen, Berlin and Greifswalde; entered the Prussian army and was afterwards a lieutenant in the Landwehr
 It is asserted by so-called historians that the above record of old Bizzy'S com ing to this mundin yarth is correct, but since the Cyclone has taken the job of setting the dear people straight on mat ters of oriental history we give the au- thentic data, to-wit: Biz was born in the year 1909 of poor, but decent parents in a little town called St. Petersburg, To- cated about thirty miles from London, on the River Clyd. He was a bright child from the start astonishing every one with his far-sightedness and knowl- edge of affairs. At the tender age of 8 years he wrote a book on astronomy, which was very widely read To illus trate the striking character of this bookt we quote statement therefrom: Stars are bright spots in the clouds and don't go out except in the day time." But it was not Tn the Helu or astronomy that he made his greatest cOnqueStS. He seemed a born leader of men, and at the. age of 21 he was grand. There was no figure in the political world around him more prominent than his own. His first public office was that of congressman from the Thirty-third North Wales dis trict. His opponent in the race for con gressionel honors was one Barney Me- Duggan, a man born and bred in the same district, of royal blood and having a great following.
 A very popular song at that time ran something like this, to the tune of Boom te-Aye:" Barney Will Tend Biz's Biz" This song was sung by mem bers of the royal family because they had no desire to see a man of ordinary birth like our hero do up royal person. That song made Biz mad, and he swore that he would cook Barneys mutton. Barney being a Connaught rambler and a man learned in the classic art of head punching, demurred. but Bizzy told him he would, and he did being elected by A majority of five.
 In congress he distinguished himself by having a bill passed providing that European governments should not inter fere with any wild Indian tribes that roamed over the western portion of North America. After this Biz had easy sailing. After the expira tion of his term of office he became a member Sf the city council, making large fortune, wound up by being elected high royal chief of the whole kingdom.
 If "Old Citizen" wants any more in formation on this subject we will be glad to give 1t to him. but he will simplify matters by writing to MT. Bismarck him. self and enclosing stamp for reply. He is still alive as we go to press, hay ing cabled us the above information in his own hand writing. He is a regular subscriber to the Cyclone. and always pays in advance. The first issue of this paper will reach him in about two weeks, and will no doubt be pleasant surprise to him. More anon.
 "WHISKERS,"
 Managing Editor.