Smyrna times., 1895-02-27
SPECIMENS OF WIT
SOME HISTORIC FLASHES OF sPoN-
TANEoUs HUMoR.

! ~, 'eh TO Repartee
oieVer and Brutal Jests Passed Amono
Englishmen of Long Ago.
Generally speaking, the strono h.
roIuseu 70 put up with jesting from tbo
weak weak. The Car Nicholas. who bad aiI
Sonle nne qualities, was hardened agoinS+
= meultated act of clemency bv the nm
u"un1eo spirit OF prisoner ReliefF n
Alan OF letters, had been imnIica+oJ -
the conspiracy of 1895 and sentenced - -
10 hanged. He was launched fro,,, 49,
iaeaI ladder, when the rope broI-o oIJ r
He was thrown to the ground soy,oroI,'
prulsed' but conscious He pickod hi,a
selI up and said quietly '"Tbo,, 90, :. IN -,
-ro-dIfs oo-1ls IL hussla' not even twine a cord
property 1t was customary in Rpssia
20 pardon the condemned after a simiIa~
liasoo. but on Relieff's words heinz ro
ported TO the czar and his pleasure do
trary." 'iiiii INC con-
Iioilry VIII, with all his violence and
Vyiailhy' could bear with a retort as 1rou
as give one, for he loved wit WIZ, -
was told him that the pope had sont +Lo
cardinals hat to Fisher. bisbor of psOi Oii0
I't Iovoi; ne SAID He may have the hat
DuS ne shall have no head to year ,,'';, -
t' %lVn' and the bishop was brongbt ~ ~
Suo DIocK' On one occasion the tnrb,,
1enU Earl OF Kildare was brought bofoTo
tne KING charged with setting fire. -,
'He cathedral of Cashel. 81 own = >,
SAID the earl, "but 1 never wonld hono
uohe II had not believed the arcbbieL
op was IN it. " Henry laughed and ,l.,, non
uoned the culprit. His bitterest o-,a',,-- pa
was the bishop of Meath. who acorIry --1-i-y
I'm nIll 20 Henry of divers misdeeds and
closed his arraignment with "Tbns ',nu unu
lloge, you see that all Ireland cannot
govern the earl. " -''N 0"iinoV
. 1hen, said the perverse monarch
Vhe earl shall rule all Ireland ;, aa3 ,'l
instantly made him lord deputy becorso ,s
i4S good humor equaled his vaIor
I,!lzaOeth resembled her father in bou
Willingness to put up with retorts g frn'-, ~. {
auoy subjects and to paw them hal, otl - t
.lnu' nos always with the greatest 70. .. {
.ue1lent. The little scene with the in T
aIeu Earl OF Essex, when she boxed bis ?
als Ior lnsolence and he laid his band i
= MS sword saying that he would not q
axe sacA treatmenb even from bor "a =
ler' IS familiar to every one q
0olng back to still earlier da+os 49, L
instantly find the imperious PIan+ao- II
leG kings giving and receiving rotor3s u
lat pear witness Of great indeDendonoo o.
nong some Of their powerful subjects q
was EDWARD who, on the refusal If Il
9 Black Dog of Warwick" to ioin
. hlng with vassals and supplies for
A. Sald, Sir Earl, you shall either % H,
a nang. The retort was, "Sir Rev I
II neither go nor hang - :
t1ehry ~ of France was good natnrod ti1
oFe most monarchs in repartee. Ass Pr
10 ID Is impossible TO reproduoa in con wi
nuonal English dress the tests of +I,i- fol
p ana witty king On one occasion at
vas the turn of NJ. d'Aubigne to sIeen Ea
INC kings antechamber. Fancving the
, monarch was asleep, he began to taIi
~. 90 IA Force, who shared his watcb At
ihg' four master is the most mn Fh
te1ul OF men." " La Force, half asIaon of
eu hlm what no was TALKING abont
en- Henry cried out: "Wake mi H. staI
elllng you l am the most ungratefnI Pri
men. the
fray go to sleep, sire, " interruntad pie;
luplghe, I'VE have great deal more Sl,'
ay ABOUT you. " Henry never showed priv
klndlness to his servant on acconn+ up
'hat he had overheard. Il
W u Iae cynical generosity of Freder. who
the Great Is unique A lackev who mad
MIN grudge had determined 70 take
on MIN. One morning he brougbt in mea
AIhg chocolate and appeared visi. wag
roubIed in countenance. "Wba+ oil, tt
SAID Frederick, looking fixedlv at Aug
ou look as if you had put moi. en- 6
\ my 1ood. " The wretch fell at his The
!! ana aVowed his crime "Get ont of easy
lght' you sooundrelr' said Fredar. oonsi
no TOOK no further notice of tho hurr,
attempt to murder him. Th
ueilcate compliment is a work of is us
lgner art than the most BITING sar- are
Every one knows the story of tho ed an
creature who found himself seated AT
een Nine. Recamier and Mms 40 aroun
ana managed to offend them both and
ylnR that he sat between wit and cusset
y ana was crushed by the retort all n
'0, :, uo 0VSel that he possessed nei. York
lac court of Louis XIV was the
where this art was brought to
tion' The flattery offered to the In
y the men of genins was ~ ~ o,ae sne sive p
and exquisite Witness the inim. trob
reply OF Mignard, who was paint. hubble
10 kings portrait for the tenth when
when Louis asked him, Dol look tonlsh
. -OoA struck
ee few more campaigns on the pollte'
u your majesty" pt 4lk'
OF Louis marshals, Bassompierre. ana IL
eat OF repartee He had spent ten smlrch
n the Bastille, and on emerging up TO t
lesty asked him his age. FIFTY In {
10 the surprised look of the king stable
rshal added, Il don't coupt the meckl
rs passed in the Bastille, because worthy
OF spend them in your majesty's poor or
--Philadelphia Telegraph. awkwal