The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1895-04-07
MIR. SMITHERS AND HIS WHEEL.

Mr.. Emithers is not a wealthy man.
Neither is he q confirmed Invalid, nor a
man Of incident temperament, yet he = at
present away from business. taking the
mineral baths at Spencer-and this Is how
1t came about.
Mamma" he called to his wife, in a
weak voice. from the back yard, one even
ing not long since. Come out here. ! am
about played out" Mrs. Smithers was put
ting supper on the table. and came out on
the kitchen porch, tanning her flushed face
with the end of a tea-toweI. Mr.. Smithers
had just arrived from his Office and stood
in the yard, with bald spot, shining and
perspiratfon dripping, leaning admiringly
against a fine new wheel. He looked guilty,
and confronted his astonished wife with a
nervous, sickly sort of a smile as the sin
gle word bicycle escapRd her. 1t meant
volumes, and Smithers knew it, and began
to wither perceptibly in the heat Of her
burning gaze. As for the lady in question
it was a critical situation. but one from
which she never dreamed of shrinking.
Being president Of the Dress Reform for
Women" and an active member of the
'Richard Harding Davis" Club, it is not
at all likely that the spirited Mrs. Smith
ers would shrink from any duty, however
painful. which would require a steady flow
or forceful and eloquent language.
so you've gone and made a fool of your
self again, have you, Aaron Smithers?"
she began ominousIy. You've bought a
bicycle at the age when a man ought to be
sitting by his fireside telling Sunday-gchool
stories to his children Upon my word. I
am ashamed of you, papa The very idea
OF a man of your size and dignity astride
OF such a thing in midair, and then think
OF the extravaganza"
During the above remarks Mr.. Smithers
had drummed nervously on the crown of
ms new straw hat and regarded the ground
with a critical eye, but, as his wife warmed
up to h subject, he endeavored to assume
an air of careless Indifference and began.
In a defiant manner, to spin the pedals of
the questionable machine.
Il suppose" Mrs. Smithers continued sar-
castlcally, and with telling effect, II SUM-
pose l only dreamed of your SAYING hard
lines and business dull and Obliged to
lay Off men when I approached you yes
eeruay morning with the request for the
very reasonable sum of SIS with which
to purchase my Easter bonnet. Explain
yourself, Mr.. Smithers. Which request
that gentleman proceeded to grant in all
haste, after taking mental stock of Mrs.
Sm1thers's fiery eyes and glowing cheeks.
Now, I'll tell you mamma" he began.
I'LL IG Idu long
left off spinning the pedals. There's no
use in getting worked up about this. This
thing was a bargain-no doubt of it. l got
it at auction for s15-"
Why papa" broke in his sympathetic but
unfortunate yoLng son, who, having taken
advantage of his parents excitement, had,
unknown to both. besides having made
an exhaustive investigation of the con-
tents of the tool bag, discovered that he
could successfully manipulate the instru>
ment which was used in adjusting the
saddle, you just told me-" the boy said
in some surprise, that you paid 500 cash
for it."
''Shut up, Freddy shouted the thorough
ly exasperated father, noting his sons
presence and the michief which he was
engaged in, for the first time. Things
have come to a pretty pass" he said, turn
stood ~scowlins drearily at his prospects,
when a man is accused OF faisehood by
his own son. GO to bed, SIR, without any
walked dejectedly into the house. Now,
mamma" he continued in, a gentler strain
specially Impressed either with her sons
impertinence or his fathers eloquence III
ton and jim jackson told me if / wanted
to reduce my weight that this was the
very thing, to do it. He said that thinner,
was just on the point of closing with a
travelling Museum manager when he was
recommended to try a wheel. See what II
has de- ne for him" Aaron, Snithers.'"
said his wife sternly, you eyade the point.
You will never lelrn to rldernever. you
wiil-never be countenanced by me IN youf
stark idiocy. / wash my hands OF you
Just then a young lady rider, who lived
next door, opened the gate, and game into
.ns back * y sSs na amliln g; t ana domestic t9aslaE u scene
on which she was intruding. well, Mr..
Smithers, she said, .''allow me to congratu-
late YOU on the good taste which you have
displayed. Now when you have purchased
a wheel for your wife, l shall respect you
as the most sensible man on TINS street
Conservative Mrs. smithers, who, with
Of the screen door retired to the pantry.
and cut a large slice of frosted cake, which
she carried to the bedroom OF her erring
In the meantime a crowd of interested
neighbors had collected on on. the OUTSIDE "Tsn
you ride yet?' asked one admiringly, as he
lifted the wheel to test its weight.
Piled cheerfully-his self-confidence having
returned with his wife's disappearance
but / hauled this thing all the way from
touched one. If a person has any muscle,
it is easy enough to learn to ride" he
paused a moment to adjust the saddle and
remove his coat. Just come out on the
front pavement and I'll show you how to
do it, Mr.. SmitherS was IOllOWeu out front
by the circle of expectant neighbors.
"A person wants to be sure that every
thing about it is all right he remarked,
as he snapped the brake important and
shook the saddle several times to assure
himself that it was perfectly steady. lie
even rang the bell, just to show them how
it goes, you know"
Now, it's something like this" he con-
tinued, finding a renewed inspiration IN the
increasing crowd. Here commenced a series
though they resulted in nothing more seri-
Gus than wild lurches Of the wheel from
right to left, sent a chill to the heart of
the most disinterested spectators and caused
the president of his life insurance COM
pany, who had been viewing proceedings
with a speculative eye, from a front win
dow of his residence just across the way,
to join the excited group with alacrity.
YOU'D orter let some NV them there
chaps hold the thing. eff you don,t want to
bust yer head suggested an apple peddler,
good-naturedIy who had driven his wagon
up to the curb, hitherto unnoticed by the
rest of the crowd. His words, too. would
have remained unheard had it not been for
the practiced stentorian tones in which
he uttered them. The crowd smiled, and
the voice startled even the brave Mr..
Smithers, who, however, only shook his
head kindly and proceeded. Il guess /
n. "a .-1 go 1a1I ~ fhacn handln