davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
o,coNNoR's POLICE BILL.

o'CoNNoR'S POLICE BILL.
The action of the City Council at
its last session, in it's denunciation
OF what is know at Austin as the
metropolitan Police Bill, will be
approved by the citizens Of San An
| tonic almost without exception.
That bill il it becomes law takes it
out OF the pc Her OF this city to reg
ulate in any efficient way either its
police or fire departments, for in
| taking away from the city the
power OF removal and appointment
it makes the TO rces in these depart
ments indeE endent of control by
the city. 1t would substitute for
the City Council the board Of three
commissioners appointed by the
governor OF the state and abrogat-
ing at one act all of the rights of
the municipality to the control OF
its police and fire departments es-
tablish over their heads the author
ity of a state commission having
no knowledge Of the particular
matters that must constantly arise
in the conduct of the business Of
these departments Of the city's SER
vice. 1t is taking the government
of the city out of its own hands
and placing it in the hands OF
strangers, who are in no way re-
sponsible to the taxpayers Of the
city, and who in the nature OF
things have no real interest in the
matters committed to them, be-
yond.that of drawing their salaries
and performing perfuuctory duty.
1t is a little singular that this bill
should have been introduced into
the state legislature immed-
lately after the defeat Of GER
tain parties in the late municipal
election, and introduced by a
citizen Of this city and this is the
more worthy OF note when it is re-
collected that at the time the city
election was pending the state leg
islature came down here to take a
hand in that contest. There is a
very large sized chronological
specimen under the timber and
the Legislature will feel the effect
Of their efforts to provide shelter
for their bug if they persist in their
present effort. If there are evils
arising out of the present system
OF appointing the members OF the
police and fire departments Of this
city, and it is advisable to separate
these departments from all politi
cal complications, and this would
be a wise measure, the plan pro-
posed at Austin by an interested
citizen, personally antagonistic to
the present Council, is not the
proper way Of accomplishing the
reform. 1t is only specious plea
under which to curtail the powers
Of the City Council and deprive
them of powers that are absolutely
necessary for the proper admins
tration Of the city affairs and it's
protection. Any attempt to rail-
road the bill through the state leg
islature will be met with all the
force Of this city. The bill is an at
tack upon the charter rights Of the
city and upon that power Of self
government that belongs to her
citizens.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

The Tennessee Legislature has
returned to its thankless task of
trying to find an excuse for keep
ing H. Clay Evans out Of the chair
of the Chief Executive of the state
to which he was elected last No
yember.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

Every Thursday and Friday
from 10 to o'clock, genuine Hun
garian Gullasch will be served by,
Mrs. A. KOENIG,
4 2 st ev Wed 22l S. Alamo st
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

Hindry can fool the Council
more times and do it slicker than
any man with whom the govern
ment OF San Antonio has ever had
business contracts. 1t is about
time that the Council shut down
on his tactics and brought him to
book. He is an adept in the art of
procrastination for his own benefit.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
He Needle d 1t.

"Scaggs is getting fat" said Will
loughby.
"He's dalevoped a double chin"
"Well, he needed it," said Par
sons.
"His original chin was over
worked."-Harper's Bazaar.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
TO CORRESPONDENTS.

All Communications for this paper should be
accompanied by the name of the author, not
necessary for publication, but as evidence of
good faith on the part of the writer. Write on
one side of the paper, in a plain hand. Anony-
nous communications will not be noticed.
The LGHT will not be responsible for the
statements of its correspondents.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
CHINESE RESTAURANT AND OR
DER HOUSE.

Board by dav or week at special rates
at ll9 SOIedad street, opp. court house.
Private dining room for ladies.
3 ii I'm Tom LEE, Proprietor.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
w. L. BARKER, NJ. D.

Office 1O7, Ave. G. Office hours
9 to l. a. M, to ) p.m Telephone,
Silverthorn & Wagner's drug store
1 6 Inn
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
TO THE PUBLIC.

The undersigned is now ready to do
business as manufacturer. dealer or re-
pairer of Pianos, at his residence and
shop. APO Goliad street. Telephone 1872
3 30 mo A. NORDMANN.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

The dish of mixed pickles on the
City Council table keeps as full as
ever. There does not seem to be
any likelihood Of its Running low.
,,r, -, 80, 4, "A, ssssS.a
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
BUSINESS DIRECTORY
Doctors, Lawyers, Etc
For Sale by all Druggists

E. MURAT BOOKER, Prescription
Druggist, LA s. Flores st. Physicians Pre-
scrtptions Specially. years in charge Of
L. Orynskfs retail store, Telephone 22l. San
Antonio, Texas.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

Legal advertisements 81 90 per inch each In
sertlon. Trustees sales Sl.0O per inch nrst IN
serton, 25c each insertion after.
Reading matter, editorial page, PC per line
each insertion; Local columns 2Oc drst inser,
ton, lOc first week. sc after first week. Special
rates on so and 100 lines running for m onth.
Home advertisements payable on first OF
each month Transient advertising payable
In advance e%-o ONLY METAL CUTS PRINTED.
Special rates given on larger space and long
tirNe advertisements. Discount given for
cash.
wAn contracts or bills must be approved
BY the Secretary or Manager.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

New York is taking the names of
every child in the city between the
ages Of 4 and 16. This will form a
part Of the census report that is to
follow the present taking Of the
census Of that city by the uni
formed police. The work will &C.
cupy about two weeks and then
Gotham will tell herself how near
she is to that two million mark.
She will find out sooner than POr-
ter's men did what the figures are.
The next time San Antonio elects
member Of the state legislature
it will be best for her citizens to
enquire before they cast their bal
lots what his opinions Of the citi-
zens are. Whether he considers
them competent to transact their
own business, or whether he thinks
it is better to appoint guardian
over them in the shape of a police
commission selected by the COVER
nor?
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

Featherbeds, Mattresses, Pill
lows, renovated and made to order. Mail
orders promptly attended to. Renovating
Co. rs W Commerce St. 7-A-12m
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

x. P. Endowment, Life,
Safe and cheap insurance, for mem.
bers only. T. B. JOHNSON, secretary.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
Miscellaneous

San Antonio Moving and
Storage Co. No. 2l5 N. Flores St. Tel. SAT.
Make a speciality of Moving Furniture, Pianos
and Safes; Packing, Shipping and Storing
Secondhand Goods Bought, Sold and Ell.
changed. Z. ZACHARY, Manager.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

Our Tailoring is in Charge Of
q. Il. Kohler. We are doing the finest work
In the state and as cheap as good work car
be made. A. PANCOAsT & Son.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
Furnishing Goods

!. Lobert, Merchant Tailor,
Successor to Val Lorrsl
Finest line imported and domestic goods
In the city. Suits $40 up; Pants 81 up. Per.
feet ft guaranteed, Commerce st. near
bridge.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
Markets

Silver King Market, SOB w.
Commerce street. Beef, Veal, Pork, Nut.
ton, Sausage. etc. Fish, Oysters, Venison and
Birds of all kinds. Free delivery and first.
class attention. Telephone 85S.
ELI ARNAUD, Prop. Mesti.
MARTIN SCHAEFER, Fish, Oysters,
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10

Visiting Cards Free, apply to
Fred Small, City Calculator, for the Daily
LIGHT No 104 East Commerce Street.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
Something Like a Fountain Pen

4 2 st ev Wed
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
Black smiths

FIJI. Volrath, Scientific Horse
sheer. Treats al diseases of the feet ana
faulty gaits. Ali work guaranteed sstiGfso.
tory or no pay. 2l7 South Flores Street.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1895-04-10
NOTICE TO DOG OWNERS.

Stf
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
just th. one.

just the One.
IF this church fair is to be a sue
cess" said the deacon to the Sunday
school superintendent, 1--WE must have
q woman who can pull the money out
of people without their expecting any
returns woman who never loses sight
of q dollar
the superintendent, with quiet, conf
dent smile.
'.who is she2'' said the deacon.
eagerly.
'.She attends our church, replied
the superintendent, land for the past
two years she has been running serv-
ant girls agency. '-Brooklyn Life.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

sold through druggists, at the price OF the
cheaper made pills.
Pheasant Peflets,' cure biliousness, sick
and bilious headache. dizziness, costive-
appetite, coated tongue, indigestion, or dys-
pepsia, windy bel hings: heart burn,"
arrangements Of the liver, stomach and
bowels. Put up in sealed glass walls. there
fore always fresh and reliable. Whether
as laxative, or i'll larger doses, a gently
acting bat searching eatlartic, these little
Pellets - are unequaled.
As "dinner pill, - TO promote digestion,
take one eacl, day after dinner. To relieve
ing equals one Of these little Pellets"
They arc tiny, sugar-eoated, arti-bilious
E,ali,,les. Any child readily takes them.
Accept no substitute that may be reco,n-
:nerded to be Just as good" It may be
batter for the dealer, because Of paying
him better profit but he is not the one
4 free sample g. to ? doses or trial IS
mailed to any address. post paid. OH receipt
of name and address on postal card.
Address WORLDS DISPENSARY MEDICAL.
ASSOCIATION. Buffalo, N. Y.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
The Money Went.

Uncle Waybacl<-I JUS tell you, tn
city is an awful place. Skin yeh alive
there.
Farmer Meadow(gloo mily}-That's SO.
Eth? Did yeh meet some green-goods
men while you was in tn clty?"
Mo, but my wife met some dry-goods
men, IN. Y. Weekly.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
A Frozen Fact.

Amstersiam-You told me On awful
lie yesterday.
Mr.. Henpecls-What was that?
fou told me you were going to
sleep. and afterwards saw you going
into the theater.''
II know it. but, holy smoke! where
else can a poor married man get little
sleep?"-Texas Siftings.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
Equal to tho Ocoa.,on.

Old Beau-How you have grown since
saw you q year ago, Miss Winifred.
Bright-Eyed Damsel - I'm not the
smallest fraction of an inch taller, Mr..
Gayman. got my growth three years
ago.
Old Beau-O. but you've grown ever
SO much in my cstimation!-Cllica8o
Tribune
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

Plumson-Il be mighty glad when
we get through with the nineteenth
century.
Rayson--W1y?
Plnmson-By that time writer's will
be obliged to give s.hn de steele, q
much-needed and well-earned rest
South Boston News
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

Football, sir, is brutal. It is based
largely upon the exercise OF brute
force, and the opportunities OF unfair
tactics are SUCH
'Oh, say-hold on. Have you ever
seen game of football?''
mo; but hold clinics in three hos
pitfalls in a college townr:-Chicago
Record.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

a recommendation.
She-I am afraid you won't like my
father.
He-Why, pray?
She-Weu, because Of his unsocial
disposition. Most people consider him
very distant.
de-That's a Recommendation. 1t las
been my experience to find most men
in his class altogether too contiguous.
Richmond Dispatch.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
Equal to tn. <lcc..lop

Doinestic-Oh, please, mum. what
shall do? Hnlf the soup is split, and
the boarders is at the table.
Mrs. Slimdiet (irmly) Empty the
Don OF red pepper into what's left.
There will be enough them. v
Weekly.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
More Atn,ospherc.

"What your story needs" said the
critic. lis more atmosphere
well, that goes to show that there's
no pleasing everybody said the dis
contcnted author. ''The editor who
read it last says that it's too breezy
Washington Star
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
Dangerous In Any Way

'Blifkens is in a critical condition:
pie wagon ran over him yesterday and
broke both his legs above the knees
You don't say?-and there's Sniff
kins suffering terribly from the snme
cause"
What, was he run down, too?''
'sNo; he ate one of the pies.''-Chi-
cago Record.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
Wont Wear EN-.

Aunt Jane-We1l, Fan, it's q vulgar
expressions but do on intend to 's,vear
the trouaexSv after you are married?
Fan de Cycle (soon to be bridej-
No, Auntse; have promised Theodore
70 give uRMy wheel altogether.-Puck.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
Nlsndaeity VS.. Ixnoronce.

Mr. Van Bullion-Is your mistress
in?
Bidy-Sure. and Oil see, sor Re.
turning In few momente.) No, sor,
she amt, eor, but she wants ter know
whin yezu be after calling agin, sor.-
Truth.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
How to KIN = Fad.

How to XIII Fad.
FoRee-This bloomer business among
female bicycle riders makes me tired.
I wish could hit upon some scheme tc
kill it in this town.
Hardhed-HumPh, that's easy! Just
get one of your newspaper friends to
slip In an item saying that the costume
makes the wearer's feet look three
sizes larger than they really are.-Buf-
falo Courier.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

Two PASSENGERS on q western train DO
same involved in q controversy, which
s waxed 80 hot that one Of them called the
was on his feet in an instant YES. q
nar," Wa s,. the smphati: Response, .'or my
''Nhat, 1he hardware InerchantT' 1.-The
same- e MI Smith hi em delishtsd to see
New York, and can show you o line Of sam.
eles that will make your fortune."-Texas
3iftin&a.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
KNOWLEDGE

Brings comfort and improvement and
tends to personal enjoyment when
rightly used. The many, who live bet
ter than others and enjoy life more, with
less expenditure, BY more promptly
adapting the worlds best products to
the needs of physical being, will attest
the value to health of the pure liquid
1axative principles embraced in the
remedy, Syrup Of Figs.
=. Its excellence is due to its presenting
In the form most acceptable and pleas
ant to the taste, the refreshing and truly
beneficial properties of perfect lax
etive; effectually cleansing the system,
dispelling colds, headaches and fevers
and permanently curing constipation.
It has given satisfaction to millions and
met with the approval of the medical
profession, because it acts on the Kid
neys, Liver and Bowels without weak
ening them and it is perfectly free from
every Objectionable substance.
Syrup of Figs is for sale by all drug.
gists in Soc and 81 bottles, but it Is man
ufactured by the California Fig Syrup
Co. only, whose name is printed on every
package, also the name, Syrup of Figs,
and being we'll informed, you will not
accept any substitute if offered.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
Very sharp.

Very Sharp.
The ladies are all going to work
and earn all they can to help pay of
the church debit
Mrs. F1aunt-How are you going to
get yours?
'.I'n get Rob to pay me a quarter
every time his meals don't please him. -
well. for my part, I don't sec any
use OF the others doing anything."-
Dallas (Tex.l Times-Herald.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02
HUMOROUS,

-Ve-J Appropriatc.-Quite appro-
priately, green goods" are sold chiefly
to green understandable (Mass.)
,Journa1
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

MoTHER-'sYou are at the foot of the
spelling class again, arc ycu2" Boy
..Yes'm.:' 'How did that happcn?,' 81 got
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

I pEL1EvE Piso's Cure for Consumption
saved my boys life last sunmer.-bfrs.
ALLIE D0CoLAss, Leroy, Mich, Oct. 90, '94.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

LIKE Oil Upon Troubled Waters IL Hale'a
Honey of Horehound and Tar upon q cold
Pixies Toothache Drops Cure in one minute
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

!. :.
I'M ~ Z Az b s..ss
49, -
-, = - 49, -
81 iIlSf - 1890 ~ aJS.e2sS
~ = - "a
& s. ~ ~ - - 1870 -
1a = - - - - vQx1oeSoo
n = - -
~ - - 81 ,. 49, ~
q - 80 100 tbs can - grovgn
i 6oR3nR lDo&.se AD6klsa1ap
- - ~ ~ 1s..sss
Ss ~ 5ass.s-ss A1.s. q ~ q . ~ =. -.
- - s e y = -
1SsH ,ssS ~ sSSisT; -, - -. Shs. ~.
~ - ~ =. ano 10y skaAs = snA3 - eho
sd oolls potat0esSt 3AsO 80 81
SI-n,, C.,--.-... sS.sssss5
With 100 postage Is the ,John ~. :ea9Haz
go ca. IaCSso.sc WI. ~, 49, 1,..e
his r,s.nsrsa - ~ . ..sei
ago Of above $500 PnEED OA1o. q fE1
=.
On ~ fasnfh Is.stsrn rSsi =. :y,,ss.Se
Iookinr Ssnsieman ssanneS oIs On H. s,ies
1osm Ss,S fcS,Sis.,s ~ t2.h - ~ sSsss
1frsiiw of,aerved = fSe CT..,,5 !. ssI..sx sS;s
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

The bisC1lt inst my darling made
WIZ not be eAteu, I'm afraid.
Me'1 use shoGns though, - splte the fntas,
9aeyN 1870 rat jeveay psHsy.welslta.
U5tvsh
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

He who is careful to speak a word in SEQ
son should be just as careful to speak 9
seasoned word.-Young Mems Era.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

Then He Was Better Pleased.
What authors have to put up with:
Minor Poet-Wen, have you read my
new book?
Candid Friend--Read it? My dear
fellow, I've read it twice.
Minor Poet (gusl1ing)-How good of
you!
Candid Friend-Not at all. L was
only trying to make out what you
were driving at.-London Globe.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

NERcHANr-ssClerk, why do You leave
that yardstick lying in the stunt Didn't you
learn in school that heat expands bodiesf''-
Eliegende Batter.
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

HE-"I think you love me. Am right a'
She-"NO; you are left."-P. & s. S. Co. q
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

CoGLEo9 TRUsrHB-ssSay, We are In bad
luck. Only TWENTY-FIVE new students COM
iese. Facuity-s'Never mindI iii send the
football team aud two glee clubs out on the
Chicago Record.
ep %sse the Hosss New xss Pes
man. ssWhat WIS your stock in tradei''
III wesns s.ss IL ssaas was trade
Isu.l 70 E'rnEa Fenrux.:-"Do xoe
Nal Ba sas studio for sn-
wM.1n..1 am ambitious to 60 before the
fooslights.' Shc-'Thcn you had better
run ~; along oe before papa comes downstairs"
49,, Il FEEL really sorry for my husband dur
plScent woman. .:indeed:; ayes. He IS
he ss
-BEATINo AHo,r the Busu.-A-"vvhatl
You call mo n syvindlcrl'' B-s'No; but
who proves to me the Contrary ."!Deatys che
the clock q 81. P0ai's, burst into a at OF
be H. csn 11' h eifs ies I aa
Is my little watch that vas made by Paddy
has eoc sSeEs a
hour an quarter since Yesterday mornin'.''
-Tit-Bits.
SYMPATHETIC PLAIN FRIEND Ito inconsola-
bio young widow)-'Thel last time met your
dear husband he stopped and spoke to me
happier for it oil day long'7 Young Widow
(stiIl oblivious to everything except her loss)
There was no woman SO humble, or homely,
Or unnttractive, or dull. but that he could
would take pains to say it."- -Lifo.
--O
Two PASSENGERS on q vvcstcl n train be-
Same involved in q controversy, which
waxed 80 hot that one Of them called the
other q liar. "What'S that, a uar3'' and he
The Lafayette gazette. [volume] (Lafayette, La.) 1893-1921, 1895-03-02

The love-lorn Suitcr sighed:
And could not live with yo,.
Tho wealthy maid replied.
Little Boy-''How old are you1'
Miss Antique (confusedly)-.Yon
should not ask a lady how old she is. -
Little Eoy-"Oh, 'xcusc me. How
young are you?':-Good News.
imprisoned Crusader ito iailer}-
Jailer (humbly)-"What for, yonr >vor-
shipful honor?" Imprisoned Crusader
(proudly)-"I wish to chafe in my
miserable captivity IN. y. Herald
ACTRESS (angrily)-"Did you write
that criticism which said my imper-
sonation of The Abandoned Wife was
a miserable fai1ure?'' Critic-"Ye-
bly, beautiful that it was impossible to
fancy that any man could abandon
you. Times.
What She Could Not Forgive
Forgive me- nc pleaded, contritely.
II didn't mean to kiss you. but the i'm
pulse was irresistible.;' ''F'orgive you, -
she snapped. Never while I live! A
but never for apologizing aftervvard. -
burlington Qa.) Gazette.
~ don't believe in opposing the
preferences of u tson in the matter OF
choosing a profession said an in
dulgent father. Nor L." said another
father. Has your son chosen his pro-
fession?" well, in a way ''Whut
is it?'' ''Why. he was stage-struck, and
insisted that he was born for the
boards as he expressed it; and SO I APP
prenticed him to a carpenter:''-Youth's
Companion.
~ wonder" said the sentimental
boarderess, ''if the little birds make
any plans for their homes in the
spring." 'Of course they do,'' said tho
cheerful idiot. Don't they have to
make a nest to mate?" The custard
pie that the astonished waiter girl let
drop to the floor at this juncture fell
on its soft side and, consequently. was
deducted from her weeks wages.-In-
Journal.
"A small boy was at a table where
his mother was not near to take care
of him, and a lady next to him volun-
teered her services. ''Lct me cut your
steak for you, if I can cut it the
way you like it, she said. with
some degree of doubt. ''Thank you"
the boy responded. accepting her cour.
tesy; II shall like it tho way you cut
it, even if you do not cut it the way
like it."-San Francisco Argonau..