davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Independent. [volume] (Honolulu, H.I.) 1895-1905, 1895-11-06

Damon requires no analysis. 1t
tells its own story very clearly
The Star.
We rather think il does. But the
story is certainly not very enjoyable
if the facts told are true. The Min
lister of Finance has even shocked
Us; although we are known to be
rather thick skinned in regard to
governmental financial statements.
The financial statement for the
month ending October opens with a
clerical or more probably typo.
graphical error which may mislead
the superficial reader. We are told
that the current account balance on
October 31st amounts to 1924, ,49955.
That looks really nice and large
number of readers will throw down
their paper and say, "bless me soul,
the treasury is all right" The aver
age newspaper reader doesn't wade
through columns of figures. He
takes the totals, and is satisfied.
Unfortunately the clerical or typo
graphical error has occurred, and
the correct figure intended to be
published by the author of the
financial statement ought to have
been $22,499.55, and not 1924, 1896
as printed. But few hundred thou
sand dollars, more or less, play no
figure in Mr.. Damon's statements.
We are told that in a memoran-
dunn at the bottom of the statement
that the receipts OF the treasury
have been much better during Octo-
ber 1896 than during October 1894.
The figures apparently prove this
assertion. 1t is worthy of notice
though that the increase in receipts
is mainly caused by the collection
OF taxes (some possibly in advance).
1t means that during October 1895
the tax-collectors under special in
structions have raised heaven and
earth to get in every dollar due
from the taxpayers, while in Octo-
ber 1894 they took it easy and did
not put on the thumbscrews. The
expenditures during October 1896
show an increase of about 1921, 1000
over those during the same period
last year This is caused by the
treasury having paid up back
salaries etc. due from the last
quarter. The high officials and
others have been on short rations
for several months. On the 31st,
ult. they we're paid up. The cur
rent account balance in the treasury
on October 81, 1894 was 50,286.31.
On the 31st of last month it
amounted to the sum of $327.26.
Even The INDEPENDENT has oc-
casionally a cash balance of that
magnitude on hand.
The Independent. [volume] (Honolulu, H.I.) 1895-1905, 1895-11-06

The Star is freed from all suspi-
cion of the species of hysteria known
as the "coupon" system of mania.
Whether it needs cash or not it
hasn't assisted in developing gam
bling tastes among the Honolulu
public.
The Independent. [volume] (Honolulu, H.I.) 1895-1905, 1895-11-06

The Japanese row the other night
is likely to get into diplomacy. The
Japs arrested mainly state that they
The Independent. [volume] (Honolulu, H.I.) 1895-1905, 1895-11-06

According to the Star the Gimme
date friends" of the political pris-
oners are not exerting themselves to
secure their release. If the Star
will kindly point out what steps are
proper and necessary, OF are even
likely to be OF benefit in the matter,
that have not been taken, their fami-
lies and friends would Do glad to
try and take them. Anything to get
their release en- Thanksgiving Day,
or even before, would crafty their
families and the public generally.
The Independent. [volume] (Honolulu, H.I.) 1895-1905, 1895-11-06

Sarcasm rules in the following
editorialette from the Star of yes
terday: "The monthly Hawaiian
treasury statement published by
Minister Damon requires no analy-
sis. tt tells Its own story very
clearly"
The Independent. [volume] (Honolulu, H.I.) 1895-1905, 1895-11-06

Referring to the first missionaries
0. P. E. in the Friend says: "They
we're intellectual men and women,
and they had to be, to be able to be-
gin where they did, reduce Ian
guage to writing and create its liter
ature." As to creating Hawaiian
literature lot it, as Created" stand
for itself. The reduction of the Ian
guage to writing was done by the
Rev. Mr. Ellis, English missionary
to Tahiti, while here on a visit.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12
LioHr AND LIVELY.

Irish Nurse, shaking patient vigor-
ously Come now, sorr, wake up an
swallow yer slapin dose; it's time.
II never give anything to young.
healthy person" lieggar-Do You
expect me TO become an old cripple
just to suit you?
"Did you say you wanted Shak-
speare's worlSs?' asked the bookstore
clerk NO" replied the naughty
girl, ~ want his PLAYS"
zone vindicntion." said Unclo Ebcn,
Fam er good thing, Hut hit am er
bad idee fob or man ter git In de
habit ob takin' en- regular"
IIe-lt usually requires the services
Of a lawyer TO secure an ejectmenL
hut when Adam and Eve She-You
forgot that there was n third person
concerned la that case.
Acquaintance MIR. Bullion, lot me
Introduce my friend Jones, I've just
been telling him how you made your
pile. Mr.. Bullion, slightly deaf-Glad
To know you, Major Pyle.
II can tell you baron. that when
my offer Of marriage was rejected by
the prima donna, was so miserabla
that was on tho point Of throwing
myself out OF the window" What
prevented you9' The height"
81 did hope for an artistic career"
said the disappointed looking man,
"but met with difficulties couldn't
conquer. What | needed was atmos-
phere." ~ see, The same old trouble.
What were you, an author or n
painter? Neither was learning to
play the trombone, but was natur.
ally short Of breath"
An lrishman, comparing his watch
with the clock Of ST. Paurs, burst
into u tit Of laughter, Being asked
what ticlsled him, he answered, AN
how can help it2 Here Is my little
watch that was made by Paddy
o'Flaherty, that cost me but 1--WE
guineas, has beat your big London
clock there full hour au' quarter
since yesterday mornin'."
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12
MIsTRusrgp HIS SEX.
uiii Of Darham Miner-cpp opposed to Il
Possible Successor.

A Durham minor, aged ~, visited
a Newcastle lawyer Ia bacholor) for
tho purpose OF making his will. Tho
old mans property consisted Of two
small cottages. which hal cost him
$3.50 and some furniture.
The lawyer. having asked his cllont
how no wished 10 dispose OF his prop
orty, says Poarson's Weekly. the lat
tor replied "Aia and woman hes TO
hov oil No lang as sho's ma widow.
Eftor that ma BARNS gots ALL"
What ago Is your old woman"
asked the lawyer.
''Soyenty.two.n replied the miner.
''And how long have you aud your
wifo been married." asked the lawyer.
"Ovcr fifty years replied the
miner
Ihoroupon tho lawyer suggested TO
his client that he SHOULD give the wife
the Interest during her life. whothcr
she continued widow. or otherwise.
chimney, aa winnot; aa'll hcy ma
ann way" said the minor
"liut surely" replied the lawyer.
''you don't expect your old woman
now ~ years Old would marry again
after your doathP"
The miner. looking the lawyer FULL
IN the face, answered with much
solcmniiy' "Woy. Kinney, thor's nae
knaalng what young cheps like your,
elf will do for money!
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12


alive c,.alns bearing frumpy.lools.
inr old person swathcd In black lace
an yellow satin, Il was the mnjor
who discovered that the now arrival
wa, princess from the Balkans, with
mum crlesy castles aud cnormou, rev.
cnnfN
The htilccliquc at Nice aud Men
tunr lever camr any nearer the prin'
cr''l ifshe had CONF down here To
p,ai fhe was u long time beginning
H. She could not speak word OF any
lao fiug' except Russian and her
cDapairints Of the parisiun bred
spercs ~ Musc0vitc seemed to make
no ca1way with her With all her
money nnd her seryautsund her great
hn.'i ho became one uf the people
wtom fnobuly knows
"rhey Say she goes Ia mass" the
major told them.
M StceriooL our British consul,
htl O queer and rather good collec'
tion of jewels. which he had picked
az ia most Legitimate way during
hs long residence abroad by advane.
inn email SUNS for the present accom-.
notation Of wandering countrymcr
aud friends They generally Rpprcci.
az d his kindness by leaving him
come lntr,nsically valuable gift One
dur the major came to him In some
embarrassment
have. he said, "a sword with a
iewvled hilt. presented 10 my grand
fuih0r by his militia company,
shou.d like 10 ask YOU to take care OF
Il Tor mo for little while. Lam go
inr 1872 to Paris Tor week or ten
daY..'
Certainly" Mr. steerfoot said,
''lii tha way, major | know how you
Young fellows arc when you 20 up u
Paws Make me your banker when
you want few pounds extra
The day after the major returned
the I.alkun princess nude her nrst ap
p'arhnce at the tables A. clos,
range she was even uglier than In hel
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

start the bullet swinging. stop OF q
hundred yards and put the bullc. ~
the bottle nine times out Of every tom
.'You don't say" said Mr. Allen
Yes" continued Fontaine. and
that isn't all. 4 iow weeks ago ! was
out one night FIRE hunting A gust Of
wind blew my lamp out, About that
time heard the ominous whir Of "a
rattlosnakc. II was very near ne.
hut ! couldn't tell exactly how clo,o
or how far ! waited moment and 10
ratified again located him pretty
accurately, aud with the fash Of one
barrel Of my gun got a bad with the
other. Quick work. hcyP"
But the funny Congressman couldn't
say a word. lie had been knocked
upoochless. fontsinc was not qucs.
toned any further.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12
FORTUNES ON rae COAST.
Tuck Has ifnd Much 10 10 with Bald
Ing MANY of Them.


ing Many Of Them.
A hasty glance at the field prompts
the Overland Monthly 10 suggest thai
quite ~ many large fortunes have
boon nccrcted on The Pacific coast
through what seemed to be accident.
stupidity. or gross violation Of sound
business mothOds as have been
amused through wcll-concciycd plans
and Intelligent management. II has
been asserted that all tho millions
taken from the lower level Of the
COmstock are due 10 q blast fired
without orders Ia the Crown Point
mine, and know " at least three
fortunes of over million each accru.
ing 10 tho owners Of mining shares
which ihoy yainly sought 20 dispose
Of at bcggarly figures on the very eve
Of developments multiplying their
values by hundreds and thousands.
Worry many real estate owners In san
Francisco are In a1luonco to-day be-
cause they could not sell their hold
ings during the great depression
caused hy the discovery OF gold OF
Frazier river. and n large hotel in the
city occupies q block Of land which
the keeper OF an eatlng-houso rcluc-
family took for board bill Of $50
thirty-nvo years ago.
4 very prominent mining stock
operator. now deceased, admitted that
a mistake In Geographic cipher dis.
patch from Virginia city 10 his bro kcr
In San Francisco saved him from
bankruptcy at critical time Had
he sold the stock short, as no intend
ed. ruin would have resulted; but the
broker bought Instead and profit Of
quarter OF million followed. An
other wcll.known San Francisco opera
tor. who enjoys the rental OF a sub
stantial building on Montgomery
street. might relate a somewhat
similar personal experience. wore he
10 disposed.
A gopher holo lod Ia the discovery
Of the valuable deposits on Shano's
Flat. In Tuolumnc county. and In
falling over q clin drunken Swedc
brought 10 light one Of the richest
veins In Amador county.
In the summer Of 1892. In defiance
Of the advice and jccrs Of their neigh
hors. u party Of inexperienced miners
numcd rifle Of tho North Yuba.
where tho shore bedrock was bare
aud thore was no Indication Of gravel
In tho channel. And. indeed. no
gravel Of consequence was found In
tho bed Of the stream after the watcr
had bccn diverted from Il, but the
bare crovlccs were studded with mug.
gots from ono TO twenty ounces In
weight There wore not loss than
half "A bushcl Of them. and many old
residents OF San Francisco will recall
the exhibition Of them iir a fow days
In u Montgomery street window.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

II was q musical burglar who on
tered tho residence OF Oscar Rommcr
OF Chicago. and plundercd IL OF silver
plato and jewels. No ono was In tho
house when the robbery was commit
ted. Tho nclghbors In tho adjoining
fats heard the burglar In tho house.
because he entertained thom with u
performance on the piano. Mrs.
Greedy. who lives In the Hat above,
heard the music. 81 wondered who
was playing In Mr.. Remmer's fat"
she said. "bocausa II has boon 30 still
down there, owing TO tho absence Of
the family for several days. When
tho piano sounded at flrst. II caught
my attention and | listened. II was a.
II some one was trying IL. Aitor run.
nj ng over tho keys fow times there
was II pause and then tho person DO.
gan playing ono OF Bach's fugucs."
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12
Two rHows ANp plorH.

Tho Lispiug Phrase started a Kentueklsn
On the Road to Fortune.
The man took n long draw from his
cigar. blew tho smoke in curls from
his lips. and ~ he crossed his legs
told n Courlcr-Journal reporter this
story OF man who Is now promi.
mont banker Of Frankfort" When my
friend was q young man he was by no
means In good circumstances. said
he. "but he was lifted into wealth by
his lisping. n fault which he tried
hard but unsucccssfully 10 overcome.
Al that time he had small farm. and,
rs his corn crop came cut we'll.
though IL was almost unstable on nc.
count OF the ovcrsupplicd market and
low prices, he concluded he would
purchase two sows and pigs and iattcn
them on corn lIc called his hired
man.
John. he said. i want YOU TO 20
and buy me two thows and pigth.
'Whowr tho hired man yelled.
do you really mean H.?
'Yeth. | do replied my friend.
well. John disappeared and my
friend looked for him 20 return tho
next morning But he did not come.
Another day and finally five days
passed. aud the farmer became uneasy
AZ last John pat In an appearance.
Where on earth have You bccnP'
asked my friend In astonlshmont
'lvo been for your hogs.
did You get thcm?'
"'Yos. sir. Yondcr they come
down the road. And | tell you had
trouble getting them. aud had TO
give good prices FOR them. They're
good ones though
'By that time the poor farmer had
nearly tainted. for. gazing In the d..
rection pointed out by John. he saw u
whole army OF pigs coming down the
road. There were 1000 Of them.
"'Jo.ru.tha-lcmr gaspcd the man.
What on earth
"John tod him that he had donO
Just what he was told; had bought
1000 pigs. lilo had paid for thom by
giving orders on his employer. My
friend was almost paralyzed, but he
saw that he mad to grin and boar II.
I lie made a contract with n noighbor
TO fatten the hogs. and In the mean
tlmo Johns orders on him
had begun pouring In like
/ snow llako' In n snowstorm.
They broke tho man up shortly aftor
that tho Mexican war broke out, and
the government offered fabulous prices
/ for provisions and storos for the army.
/ My friends hogs had been iattencd
up. and hc sold thcm TO the govern
mont aud he made four or five times
rs much money as he paid FOR them
aud got his start toward wealth.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12


ron, dofs them even worse than the
scifdcstroycd. as they last longer.
aud when one man taps another ON
the shoulder and says, "sco that
poor shabby old fellow over thcrc7
Hc Loot million In this room. and he
comes here 10 light his battles over
aud over" the sight has been condu'
Give 10 low spirits aud light play.
10 u comes about that Monte Carlo
has it, corps Of penrioncrs
The major was one ~ these. lie
was dappcr little man from Rich.
mond. Va. who, since he put down
his sword with Lee. had spent his
time. for some hours during the day,
IN commercial house la his nativr
town His evenings he passed ~ an
ornament 10 society, where he was
much priced for his bachciorhood his
gallantry aud his versatility.
There was n Northern branch OF
the family which had been entirely
ignored By the Virginia MAYORS, and
when the last member Of u died aud
left the major fortune. u came like
n shower Of gold out of clear slty.
The clerks In the Office snid that when
the news came 10 the major ho tossed
up his hat and gave three cheers aud
a. rchcl yell, but nobody believed H.
llc WINS bitterly censurcd In Rich
mund Ter not staying there aud build
ing up hig family to H. former state
aud splcndor Hut Instead ~ huying
I...Ia a.. Ia I......a - a.. NfuUI.,
fnmilg, aud marrying zone Of vir-
g1its charming daughters Air." the
innior went 10 New York 10 take pos
scs,ion ot his fortune, and forgot Ia
come back.
Two ycars later he hal lost every
penny 81 u Ut Monte Carlo They
heart 81 Il In Richmond.
Hood viii tell, they said In Rich
mond There was that grandfather
81 Nnylors old Peter, who would NJ
up OIL night over whist"
Thcro was a story, but nobody men.
toned II aloud. that tho frst Maylor
who came 10 Virginia left England
because he had married AN actress
Fntting all these together Richmond
mothers thanked heaven piously that
their daughters had never married
the major.
The major was valued ut Nice. llc
received ten francs day In consider
alton 81 never coming nrnr The tables,
and he was able 10 live on that Din g.
ncrs and afternoon toas were spread
all along the Riviera for an agreeable
man like the major, and he knew
everybody and everything When
one day there appeared u magnificent
equipago with llvcries aud climbing
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12
BERLIN A SUNLESS CITY.


streets Asphaited and Kept Clean Even
In the toore.t ouarterI
a foreigner coming 10 Berlin will b5
impressed almost at once by the OK
cellcnt streets. and further by the eN-
cellcnt manner in which they are
taken care o. Almost everywhere
thoy are asphalted. even where they
are narrowcst. and not only In the
middle Of the city. but far out into the
suburbs. This work has been done
In the most substantial manner. This
department OF city affairs is intristod
20 skilliul officers. who perform their
duty according TO the latest scientific
principles In the center OF the city
a large tract Of street Is now being
torn up for new horsccar tracks. and
II l. an instructive sight 10 SEQ the
fine scale upon which the work i
done. The foundation Is at least
foot In depth Of the hardest possible
mixture OF small stones and cement.
Upon this, by means OF monstrous
rollers and other machinery, il placed
the asphalt, which Is not more than
half an inch In thickness, but which.
on account OF the strong subwork.
wears like the everlasting rock. IL
seldom needs repair. says the Phila-
delphia Telegraph. IL does not run
away In hot weather. and docs not
rut under tho heaviest kind OF traffic,
This adds materially. OF course. 20 the
beauty OF Berlin. and facilitates the
work Of cleansing tho streets. another
department OF municipal a1ministra-
ton which Is attended TO In the most
effective manner Cloansers In uni
form arc constantly at work In nll
parts OF the city. who with broom and
brush heap up the refuse before the
curbs, 10 be hauled of 10 tho city
farms during the night At intervals
each day water carts are driven over
the streets. and boys follow after with
squeogccs, which they propol by long
handles. washing every particle OF
filth away.
The excellent condition OF the
streets Of Berlin Is one Of the reasons
why the city has mono OF those dis
tricts which have come 10 bo called
"slums." While London and Paris,
not 10 mention the Italian and Spanish
cities and some cases nearer homo.
suffer In notable manner from tho
congestion OF the poor at these points.
whcro they live crowded together
under the most unhealthy surround.
ings. this Is not TO any extent true OF
Berlin. There are districts In tho
east and north whoro the poor live
together, but In nothing like the mis-
cry and slualor which one will find
elsewhere. Tho streets. as already
remarked, are asphaltod and they are
clean. They are nearly everywhere
wide. There are none OF those little
dark alleys which exist in other
cities. The houses aro we'll built and
sound. One could pass through these
districts tlmo and again and did he
not see the children on the sidewalk
and the women with their heads out OF
the windows II might scarcely occur
TO w 'bgt he was among tho poor
poo, gho fronts OF tho houses arc
OF yel handsome masonry. harmonl-
Gus In architecture and In no important
respect different from tho houses In
many weather. sections OF the city.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

There are nearly 500 Varieties o.
plums, many OF which arc perhaps
only dissimilar In name Tho com.
mon plum, tho bullace, aud the sloe
arc generally rooAonod by botanist .
as distinct species, but with much
doubt II they are really distinct, as
the plum passes into the bullace and
the bullato into the sloo by insenslblc
gra lations.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

Remarkable stories are current OF
wages In Southern Florida, and II Is
true that n skilled orange packer, boy
or man, can earn sl.5O day. but tho
employment IL not permanent. II Is
true. too, that 900 an aero has boon
made In single winter from toma-
toes, but hero again little capital
and considerable knowledge ara ro-
quirod, II 10 unsafe Ia seek employ
ment IA Southern Florida without
somo sort Of guarantee,
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

The name OF "Bonliace," as applied
20 hotol.kecpers. is derived from u
good, devout, and hospltable man
whom 81. Augustine created u saint
subsequently he became the patron
saint Of Germany, and II was In that
country. according to some writers,
that hotel or tavern keepers. rs we'll
~ those prlyat, citizens who ut times
except open house" ~ the saying Is,
were dubbed Bonliaccs. Dante refers
90 Bonifaco; 10 likewise do Shakespeare
Bacon and Lamb.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

II Is somewhat curious com.
montary upon tho principles which
govern handlcraft procedures that
one Of tho hammor.heads Of the gold
beatcr In heavier than tho single
handed sledge-hammor Of tho forge.
man and smith, which weighs only
ten pounds. The heaviest hammer OF
the gold-beater weighs seventeen
nnunl.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

France pays increasing attention to
forestry and Is acquiring aud rcplant-
ing much waste land 10 control tor.
rents and prevent tho spread Of sand
dunes, About 49, per cent OF the
total aroa of France Is In forests. u
total OF %. i22 square miles. Of which
the state manages about ono-third.
The iJrost holdings OF the communos
aud Of public institutions are much
larger
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

Tcacher-If one servant girl could
clean II room In two hours. how long
would II take two servant girls to do
itP
Little Girl-Four hours.
Teacher Wrong. II would take
only one hour.
Little Girl didn't know you was
talkin' about servant girls that was
strangers TO each other.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

Some have an idea that tho thunder,
storm Is a native OF the equatorial
regions, but such Is not tho case. In
France there Is AN average Of one
thunderstorm for every day In the
year and In Germany the annual mum.
Dor Is 335. while In Sumatra and
Ceylon twelve Is the average, and In
Peru there have only boon two during
a century.
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

That's tho seventh time this morn
ing" said tho shoe merchant, Us
customer left tho store. 'that you
told mo In tono OF voice that couldn't
escape being overheard that woman
reminded you OF 'Trllby.'"
YES" replied the new olorlS, ''and
that's tho seventh woman I've sold u
palr OF shoes to"
The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-12

Professor &. V. Boys says that to
tako photographs Of a bullot rs II IA
being projected through the air at
maximum possible speed II Is ncccs.
snry To have recourse TO method Of
illumination Infinitely moro rapid
than that given by an electric spark,
For this purpose a steel mirror. so
mounted rs 10 revolyc at the onor-
nous speed OF 1000 por second. l.
not larger than u twenty-five cont
pltsc, and tho beams Of light given
Oh from Il pass across the screen at
such an unthlnkablc rate Of speed that
II enables the photographers To take
pictures Of tho bullot ON exposure. Of
only onc-milllonth OF second.