The Windham County reformer. (Battleboro, Vt.) 1876-1897, 1895-08-02
THE REFoRMER: BRATTLEBoRo VT, FRIDAY AUGUST e. 1896
GLINIPsEs OF LIFE.

second CannlDal what y the mat
ter?
First Cannibal I've just eaten that
friend of the missionary's wife.
Second Cannibal-Good gracious,
man. That woman's member of
Sorosis. She never agreed with any
man III her life. 4 Harpcr's Bazaar.
Thirteen Years Experience.
Millcr's Falls, Mass. During the
past thirteen years, said Mr.. w. A..
johnson of this place, my wife has
been sick from kidney and liver com
plant and liberation of the stomach.
At each time she has taken DIR. Ken
nedy's Favorite Remedy, and it cured
her 1t is a family medicine with us
and many of our neighbors.
Revenge.
Il have just captured slot machine
maker down on the beach, said the
servitor.
"We'll have him served broied
alive" said the king of Mbwpka,
grimly. He and his kind have been
responsible for falling off of more
than 30 per cent in the missionary con
tributions. - indianapolis journal.
Took Him at His Word.
Brace II like joke, but printing "a
fellows death notice is carrying Joke
too far. ~
Bagley-" Didn't you say you would
pay me Saturday night that five you
borrowed, if you were alive?"- Puck.
Ii afflicted with scalp diseases, hair
falling out, and premature badness.
do not use grease or alcoholic prepare
tions, but apply Halls Hair Remover.
A Thoughtful Domestic.
Mary, we have breakfast at s
O'Clock. - said Mrs. Post to her new
servant girl, who was already entertain
| ing several friends who had dropped in
| To see how she liked her new place.
"All right Nam, said Mary. eff
amt up don't wait for me. !" San
Francisco Post.
Hospitality.
From San Francisco. are you? |
see the Christian Endeavor convention
is going to your city next year. |
suppose you'll give them great recep-
ton.
His Only Rival.
II have never yet heard Bunkins
say kind word about anybody" re-
marked the cosby citizens
Neither have |, " was the response.
He's worse for running people down
An Enlargement.
Maude How is your friend. Miss
Flaunter, now?
Ethel She is no friend Of mine.
I'm not on speaking terms with her
now we only kiss when We meet.
Boston Transcript.
"There is danger In delay"
Since 1861 have been great suf-
ferer from catarrh. tried Ely's Cream
Balm and to all appearances am cured.
Terrible headaches from which | had
long suffered are gone. W. j. Hitch
cock, Late Major L. S. Vol. and 4. A.
Gen. Buffalo, y. Y.
Ely's Cream Balm has completely
cured me of catarrh when everything
else failed. Many acquaintance have
used it with excellent results. Alfred
w. Stevens, Caldwell. Ohio.
Price Of Cream Balm is fifty cents
Principal Ito newapprenticel Has
have To do in the afternoon? Youth
Yes, sir. ] was to waken him when
saw YOU coming. y Dahem.
j udNt tiiilt W dsh lot YOUR
ter's hand. Mr.. Herrick, said young
Waller. nervously. "Oh, well, you
can't have it, said Herrick "l'm
not ooling out my daughter on the in
stallment plan. When you feel that |
You can support the whole girl, you |
may call again. y, Harper's Bazaar.
Guest(pushing them away from him |
| don't like the way you cook eggs /
at this restaurant. Waiter What's the |
trouble, sir? Guest You don't cook
them soon enough. Chicago Tribune.
You carry about you watch. knife,
matches, and various other handy |
things Do you carry Redding's Rus
STA Saive? Better leave all the rest at
home, rather than not carry Russia
Salve. Quick relief from pain and
danger in many kinds of accidents
cuts, burns, bruises sprains, pune
lures. etc Your druggist will sell You
Il box Of it. today, for only y cents
"Well. " said the ghost of the man
who had been killed by dynamite ex
plosion. - | must confess had one
bang up time before ! died = Phil
iadelphia Record.
Lady 1t is strange that man like
YOU cannot get work The tramp
Well, you see, mum. people wants re
fereuces from me last employer an
he's been dead twenty years. (Philadel-
phia Telegraph.
He Your chaperon is not very
She tabsentlyl But you
should see her when there is a man in
my vicinity.
Neither calomel nor any other inju-
rious drug is contained in Ayers Pills.
They are composed of the active prin-
cipes of the best vegetable cathartics,
and their use is always attended with
marked benefit For sluggish liver
Or for constipation, nothing surpasses
Ayers Pills. adv.
III IL, yes Well show 'em real
genuine western hospitality, we will.
run wide open. an whiskey
free as the grace of heaven. They'll
have good time, you bet " From
the New York Recorder
The custom of having baked beans
'or supper on Saturday nights and
again on Sunday mornings is SO com
non in some parts of New England
hat the servant who has lived in New
England families cannot easily adapt
lerself to any change in this respect.
This was amusingly ILLUSTRATED in
he case of a domestic named Hannah,
Who went TO live with family who
lad moved to New England from the
vest. On the morning of her first Sat
irday in her new home Hannah came
o her mistress and asked: please,
ma am, where is the bean pot?'' The
,ean pot. Hannah? We haven't any.
9 No bean pot ma amp" said Hannah.