Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1895-11-23
WlGeLEsWoRTH sPRINKLEs.
At First the Machine Wouldn't Work.
Afterward 1t Did.

street. That's where your dust comes
from. Wet the street down and ye'd have
a clean house enough. Any fool knows
that. I've known it for years"
'But how can we sprinkle it9" she Won
dered, after deep cogitation.
"Why same's anybody does, Of COURSE"
explained Mr.. Wigglesworth. "Wha'd ye
s'pose? Think We used lawn mower?
Wanted cross cut saw pro bly-thats
what most people use.'
With an infnitude of this sort of ia
BILE talk did Mr.. Wigglesworth lengthen
the dinner hour. At evening he came per-
spring home under the weight of some
small rubber hose and revolving lawn
sprinkler.
'Therev' he pulled, unloading his bur-
den, "now We'll show We how to keep
clean.
Hurrying through supper with less than
his usual critical review Of the biscuits,
Mr.. Wigglesworth FASTENED to the lawn.
'What is this iron thing with the crook
ed arms for?" his wife wanted to know.
"That to wet the lawn with, of course"
returned Mr.. Wigglesworth in tone Of
Importance "What ye think got it for
to bake bread WITH Reckon it's for the
hired girl to use in breaking dishes, don't
ye?'
10 which oral accompaniment Mr.. Wig
ellsworth busted himself with attaching
the hose to the kitchen faucet and then
making the other end fast to the sprinkler.
1t was an upright iron device, painted
green, with four eccentrically branching
arms of polished metal
"Now, Emma" he called in tone Of
authority, we let on the water in the
kitchen, and I'll show We something
that'll surprise ye."
And that was what he did after the fol-
lowing manner, to wit:
Mrs. Wigglesworth attended to the kitch-
en- faucet as directed and then ran hastily
out to witness the display, but the foun-
tain was dumb.
"Why don't ye let ON the waters" cried
her husband testify.
II did," answered Mrs. Wigglesworth.
"Well, why don't the thing squirt them"
growled Mr.. Wigglesworth, and he rushed
down to have look at it.
"YahW he snapped as he noticed the
turn cock on the machine. "Don't ye
know enough to let 'em all on at onceS
S'pose waters going to squirt through
stone WALTZ"
With his usual precipitation he fetched
a wrench at the cock, and the polished
arms began whirling merrily. Mr.. Wig
ellsworth, on his hands and knees, fell
easy prey to the showering water
"Yow" he yelled, scuttling about on
all fours: "Shut her off! What ye doing!
Get out!" But tho swift revolving ma
chine, under full city pressure, distributed
Its streams with such liberal and diverse
eccentricity that the blinded Wigglesworth
was utterly unable to get free from it 'un-
til his wife, rallying from her. stupor,
rushed to the kitchen and shut off the
supply.
Wigglesworth, dragging his leaky person
up the stoop. "Don't We know anything
in the world9 Amt ye got more sense
than to go letting on that faucet fore I'd
had time to turn on the machine?"
"You--you told me to-" stammered
Mrs. Wigglesworth.
sTold ye to!' snapped her husband
trailing his watery course up the front
stairs. "Whats that got to do with it?"
Unable to combat the subtlety Of this
argument, Mrs. Wigglesworth contented
herself with hopping up her husbands
trail and listening to the rumble of his ut
terances as he charged about the room
above putting on some dry clothes. Hear
ing him coming down later she discreet
ly withdrew into the pantry, while Mr..
Wigglesworth went out on the lawn and
kicked the polished arms off the sprinkler.
Somewhat Modified by this transaction,
he put nozzle to the hose and fell to lay
ing the dust in the street. There was
something SO pleasant iu the singing OF
the water as it spurted through the nozzle
and flung its refreshment upon the dried
and powdery thoroughfare that Mr.. Wig
glesworth's nature softened.
"That's the stuff he said, with an air
Of satisfaction. and he deserted variety
Of figures OH the dusty face of the street.
The minister stopped and beamed upon
the performance.
''How delightfully."- cooling and invigo-
ratingl' he exclaimed. :
eyes, faint bad" Mr.. Wigglesworth
acknowledged oomplacently, as If in q
sense he was responsible for it.
"There is something so grateful in these
t shH"u,' eartb +" The. minister continued
wnnS not,,ra a,,ans oxl,;h;t IN bar instant
na " tha grat;t,,ds sha aYnerisncas
ae' a,,ah e.onaro O,,s e e !,
a. n sT9m s 60 !" nodded NJ W;ogleswortb
,,o4t, n' down. sv = nass;na doc ee-''' ~
" WWher Moses ;n tha wildernessn
Nv, "n nasoae ~ m;mstar could draw b,a
na.a1, I o sosb ; outfit dashed NV the
p pt.ao. 4 sso,,t r,.od fo:ed man was f 1r w.
s's a +.no hoa,,t,f,,I ,,a,nan IN liaht
sns, "a onst,mas sat ~ aasa mon fhe
s SUI. soa+ amuaarina ~, ~ 0reat adyantage
r NO su..v, ,on+h "a +,r uaJ H. haad ~
4t.,,d ~ ,,,;,,,star and tha nod facad man
"vv. It'll, 4ho c;,.c,a ~ tha ,natorw Strao
we haso, ". annhodv raal;yed What was tha mat.
10 ~ ' rt+a,od a hoarsa VOC vo iI , nat,ro,
S1.,,.h = t +he occas,on wboroat M VIZ.
o ..ias,5arth t,,rred hast,Iy With inst aroneh
AIO6 WIZ VA uuAhON AesoVAAJt VAeAA uoVoAou6AA