St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1895-03-09
TEXAS BILLS DOG.

crowded with eccentric characters,
and yet every now and then one will
meet newspaper man whose ways
are as odd asg.are those of the
heather Chinee. I have in mind the
peculiarities of one I met in Seattle,
a few years ago. He was a bright
fellow, with streak of peculiar
wit that made him very companiona-
BILE. 0But he was eccentric, ard
among his eccentricities was pen
chant for bulldogs, cats and a big
guilT-one size smaller than a cannon.
He was Texan by professionalism
is, he claimed to have been born
in Texas, and seemed to take delight
in corroborating this claim by his
style of dress and his custom of al
ways carrying that big gun under
the belt of his trousers. I don't be-
lieve he would kill anybody, but he
provocation, and I was never so
overcome by curiosity as to feel in
clined to make the test I was will
ing to accept his word for it-modi-
fled by my own doubts and mental
reservations.
We used to call him 'Texas" for
time after he began working on the
paper on which 1 was employed. The
boys all noticed a familiar look
about him as though they had seen
him somewhere before, but they.
never could place him. We finally
discovered that he bore a striking
similarity to the caricatures of him
self Bill Nye runs with his writings.
This explained the apparent famil-
iarity of his face and makeup, and
after this we always called him Bill
Nye.
Bill was a first-class newspaper
mani don't mean the original Bill,
but his counterpart, Texas" He
earned decent salary, but he was
not overburdened with the acquis-
tive instinct, and when he finally
got out of work, he was not very we'll
fixed financially. Then economy be-
came imperative, and he went to
room with another newspaper man
named Moffitt, who had a room in a
fiat. They had not been rooming to-
gether very long, however, when
Bill picked UP cat on his way to the
room about 2 o'clock one morning,
and when he entered the room with
the cat on his arm and the BULLDOG
which always followed him-close at
his heels, looking as sour as a fourth
rate prize fighter but wagging his
his temper, Moffitt was in bed.
Bill, as was his custom as soon as he
entered the room every night, pulled
the big gun out and stuck it under his
pillow. Then, after rubbing puss a
few moments, he put her down on the
floor. But scarcely had he released
her when the bulldog made spring
for her, and puss made spring for
the washstand. The dog charged after
her, and over went the washbowl and
pitcher, covering the floor with broken
pottery and flooding it with water.
Mofht, startled at the uproar, raised
his head just in time to see the cat and
dog both leap upon the foot of the
bed Puss was enough in the lead so
that she reached the head and scaled
the high headboard before the dog
could seize her. Moffitt leaped out of
the bed with bound and gave possess
sion t9 the bulldog. Who wouldn't?
Meow - meow - meoW-f-f," went
the cat, as she sat on the headboard
with "a hump on her back and watched
the bulldogs frantic leaps, uncertain
whether he was going to reach her or
not. She glanced about to see if she
could not. discover some higher perch
that would give her more assurance of
SAFETY but none appeared, so the best
she could do was just sit and NEW.
and Jerk her back up a little higher
and assume threatening aspect every
time the dog made leap.
} 'Bow-wow-Sow-wo went tho
bulldog, as he would back off toward
the foot Of the bed and then make an
other charge for puss.
Mofntt had been so startled at first
that he could not realize what had
happened for a minute. But after he
rega1ned his self-possession, he grabbed
the big gun from under the pillow and
sWore he would kill the dog if Bill did
not call him off. But Bill was eniov-
ing the thing as huge circus. He
mad laughed himself almost into a fir
and paid but little attention to what
Moffitt said
1 mean what say I'll kill that d.
DOG, so help me. if you don't take
him out of here" yelled Moffitt, as he
stood In his nightclothes, pointing the
gun at the canine
Just then the door opened, and there
STOOD the landlady in her nightclothes.
tremp1lng with fear. The whole house
mad been aroused and the hall ryos
filled with men and women in +bair
night robes, expecting to see a platoon
or police emerge with half a dozen
bloody corpses.
FINALLY Bill called his dog down, took
the cat under his arm, stuck the big
gun under his belt and retired to find
quarters where a fellow might eniov
hlmself without being interfered with
1t Is needless to say that he and Moffitt
did not room together any more.