Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1895-03-28
CAUGHT IN KANSAS.

religion
The Kansas legislature came in like
a Hon and went oat like a goat-a
horny crowd, ready and eager to de-
YOUR anything in sight.
According to the Democrat Dodge
City's first" young men steal monkey
wrenches from the railroad company,
and for their unlawful monkeying get
wrenched into limbo.
X X x
An Atchison white man named
Green has got religion and Joined a
black church, and the people Of that
city are shocked at the ineengruous
blending of the colors.
The Atchison Globe says that
maiden lady keeps a parrot which
swears and monkey which chews
tobacco. She says between the two she
doesn't miss husband very much.
* X X
The ElDorado Republican suggests
that the Morrill, administration must
get down closer to the buffalo grass
and cow chips, il it expects return to
power. Another suggestion OF ''Root
hog or die"
And now the Hutchinson News is
-'after" Congressman Calderhead for
his gold bug notions. It says if the
gentleman pesists in misrepresenting
Kansas, he'll discover his mans COM
mencing with an ''S.''
x * X
An Atehison man has gone to west
ern Kansas to see ifhe cannot get back
some of his clothes his wife gave to the
sufferers. If he fails, he will ask per-
mission to stay out there and board out
the value of the clothing,
X Fa9s
Molly Lease refused to run for mayor
of Wichita and the Beacon considers
her decision an appreciated one; Wich-
tia does not want to nonOpolize every
known fad, and is willing to divide ,up
Mollie with the rest of the state.
x x x
Fifteen of the saloons Of Leavel-
worth carry regular advertisements in
the Leexenworth Times, and ''they
say'' that there are at least fifteen
more that are not enteEprising enough
to realize the benefit of printers ink.
x X x
Rev. Parkhurst of New York has
been closing in on some of the Kansas
farmers on whose farms he held mort
cages. We may now expect to see
Tom Leftwieh, the Larned Parkhurst,
come down on his delinquent subscrib-
ers and deprive them of their Optic.
x X X
The Topeka Journal says the repub-
lIcan:eXecutive committee thinks 50, $50
too much to pay for the gas furnished
the state house during the legislative
session When the quality Of the vast
amount of gas there wasted IS consid-
cred, the objection should be sustained.
X x x
Ed. Wood, of the Lyons Democrat,
estimates that the income tax Will pay
nearly half the pension roll. It was
Gi10 poor LH60 anu tlOSo OIL uNUSrdG6
means that fought the war and it would
have been simply justice if the rich
benefciaries had stepped manfuily up
and paid the entire war debt.
* x x
Says the Jewel County Review: The
Newspapers have two classes of politi-
clans to deal with. One do all the
good they can for it, for the good it
does them; and the other help a con-
temporary all they can for fear of a
fight. The former class are the win
ners, and the latter class are always
"after something"
X X X
Pap Eskert sat in his dingy little
Office down in Arkansas City last Mon
day, when ray of sunshine fell warm
and dancing through the fy-specked
window and lit upon his bald think
spot. Instantly he seized a pen and
wrote this beaming heraldry of spring:
ssHear the spring birds sing in the Italy
of America. See the lilac buds burst
ing. Look at the maiden swinging in
the embowered hammock, and gaze up
on her mother hustling hod of coal.