davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
PrTn AND POINT.

-vfsitor-1How do you like your lit
tie baby brother?" Little Sister-"He
is pretty nice. only he lacks modern
culture.
-He-ssI may be poor, but there was
time in my lite when Irode in car
riage." She-"Yes, and your mother
pushed it, too
-Nearsighted Old Gentleman-''Lit
tie boy, how much does 3 bicycle like
that one of yours" Young Woman Tin
bloomess- .'Sir.-Ameriean Hebrew.
-Britisher (home from abroad)-"We
didn't find the Americans interested in
the things we expected" Britisher
never abroad) -eDidn't they notice you
at all?'-Detroit Tribune.
-Watts-"There goes the only man
who ever made Col. Blugore take
water" Smallwort-"Youd don't say!
Who is hep" Watts-.'The coloneTs
millman. Tribune.
Write me as one who loves my fellowman."
The angel heard . gracious maiden say;
To show herself sincere she straight began
And went that night bareheaded TO the play.
Washington Star.
-Houser-'I see that they are put
ting plates ON gunboats eighteen inches
thick" Mrs. Houser-"Let's get some
of them. Perhaps the servants can't
break em."-Philadelphia Record.
Hey wonder when you will b
able to set as good table as my mother
does?" Shelby the time You are able
to provide as good table as your ia
ther does, my dear."-Burlington Qa.)
Gazette.
Policeman to Wheelman (who is
riding on the side path)-''See here.
young man, you can't ride there"
''Can't. Ell? Well, You just watch me-"
And he shot out of sight.-Ameriean
Wheelman.
Not at All Professionalism.
Squiller Gust got his L. r. G. E)-
''Why; what's wrong with it?'' Experi-
enced Physician-"What's wrong!
Why, the thing is positively legible"-
Woonsocket Or. ~ Reporter.
ibid Mr.. Spooner propose to you
last night?" Bertha-"Yes>" And did
he say he had never admired any other
girl" Bertha-''Well, about the same
thing; he said he'd never gone with
any other girl except you."-Los An
geles Times.
1T was Elsie's first night at the con.
cert, and she listened delightedly till,
as the applause which followed the
prima donna's wonderful trills SUBJ
sided, she leaned over to her mother,
and in a very audible whisper ex-
claimed: ooh, mamma! Don't that lady
gargle her throat just lovely. "-Brools
lyn Life.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
TOO REALISTIC.
1t Resulted In Cutting the Damages in
Two.


Two.
1.-THE old lady had fallen through a
cellar door," said the insurance agent
reminiscently, land it was my business
to settle the claim, for we insured that
whole row of apartment houses. She
was a fine and vigorous old woman,
with great powers of Imagination. and
the description of her sufferings as re.
lated by her and swore to by her hus-
band nearly turned her hair white.
She wanted two thousand dollars, and
I was pretty nearly persuaded that l
ought to have given her at least half OF
it, when she gave me another view OF
the case by introducing little real.
ism. AS climax to her tale of woe
she fshed an old switch of hair out OF
her bureau drawer and waved it
triumphantly."
's''Tis the hair of me head! Look
at that = said she. ''Tis the hair of me
head which was drawn out of me SCALP
by the teeth O. me pain
'.Now that was little too much, you
understand, because the switch was
nothing but bundle of jute and horse.
hair which she had bought at dry.
goods store possibly for couple OF
dollars. So the next time called on
her made up my mind to get the claim
discharged for five hundred dollars.
and had the money with me in one
dollar bills. It made big package,
end when 1 laid it down on the table
it looked as much as the capital of a
national bank. That's a great point,
my boy, always carry your roll in
small bills. got receipt. but if she
hadn't flashed that switch upon me
she would have been five hundred dol
lars better off. IN. Y. Press
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
Caps Arc to BE Revived.

A commendable revival of time
honored custom is the resumption of
delicate house caps for the young
matron. She makes them herself of
crisp white tulle with knot of velvet
or airy pompon of violin string ribbon,
and considers herself eligible to this
dignity when her nursery counts one
inhabitant. The bow in the caps wing
changes to harmonic with her break
fas. gown, that may be Of turquoise
blue French cloth, trimmed with mint
green satin ribbon and points of green
velvet. On occasions the gown is re-
placed by wide skirt Of black taffeta.
speckled with little satin dots or
squares. and worn with q plain dark
soft silk bodice, over which is crossed
white chiffon lace-edged kerchief.
full upon the bust and tied behind
with loops and ends reaching half way
TO the knee.-N. Y. Post.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
TRIPLES THAT cosT MONEY.
furnishing for My Lady's Dressing Table
Comes High These Days.


Comes High These Days.
Brushes and combs seem very mum.
dane articles, but in these fin-de-siecle
days there is positively no limit to the
amount of money that .can be spent
upon them. Silver, we have heard for
some time, was going out of fashion,
but never have there been seen more
beautiful designs than this season.
The Dresden china sets are exceeding
ly handsome, and come with charm
ingly painted miniatures ON the back.
There are enameled brushes and
combs. gold as we'll as silver, tortoise
shell, amber, ebony, and ivory. Many
conservative people still prefer the
ivory, and, indeed, set
of ivory, with silver mono
grams, is always in extremely good
taste. The severe and sudden changes
in our climate are serious drawbacks tc
putting a great deal of money into
ivory toilet articles, for, as is well
known, it is singularly sensitive to- the
weather. Many q maid servant has
been severely blamed when the ivory
hand glass has been discovered with
the mirror cracked in several places.
With sudden heat or cold the ivory con-
tracts or expands, aud the glass suffers
in consequence. Tortoise she'll is also
affected in the same way, although not
to the same extent.
Silver is, of course, the most durable
of everything, and, after all, is very
satisfactory, and 81, 900 or $1,000 will
purchase as handsome a set as heart
could wish for. A hundred and fifty
dollars also can, judiciously expended,
buy an effective set. including, OF
course, many other articles than brush
and comb.
The care of brushes is not under.
stood by everyone. The handles OF
backs should never be covered with
water. The best plan is to fill bowl
with very hot water in which has been
dissolved a teaspoonful of borax. The
bristles of the brush should be held in
the water for minute or two, when
they should be given few hard
shakes; then again they should be put
in another bowl of the borax and
water. Finally, the brush should be
rinsed in successive waters until there
is no muddiness to be seen, when the
brush must be put in the sun to dry,
with bristles up. This programme
must be carried out every week to in.
sure absolute cleanliness.-N. Y
Herald
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
Asia and It's People.

The great continent of Asia, to which
so much attention is given just now, is
remarkable for many things, but it is
especially noteworthy in respect of its
people. In the first place, it was the
cradle of the human race; secondly, it
contains many more people-one hun
bred and fifty millions more, say some
than the rest of the globe put to-
gether, and. thirdly, in the Burmese it
has the smerriest people in the world.
and in the Ainu of Japan the saddest
Louisville Courier-J ournal.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
And Her Name Was @Birdie."

There is occasionally a great deal in
a name | think Frances Willard
would les, half her influence if she
signed herself Fanny and l am sure
that the secretary of the treasury
would no longer inspire respect it We
knew him as Johnnie There are
times, however. when there is nothing
In a name. A very large, very black
and very noisy woman was brought
into police station the other night
She fought like tiger and when the
officers attempted~to put her into a
cell she was SO tall and SO broad that
the cell door could scarcely admit her.
And her name was ''Berdie. Wash
ington> Post
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
HEALING A FEUD,

1t Arose From a Misunderstandinr rba,
Was Later Washed Away.
As / sat in the cobbler's shop in a
little mountain town to get NV shoes
repaired, native came In who was ad-
dressed as Mr.. Sammis, and after some
general talk the cobbler inquired:
ANY mo- killin's of late?'
mo, no mo- killin's," was the reply.
''But thar will be?'
s'Of co'se'
''Yo' gwine to kill ole man Blake, !
reckon?'
Eyes. I'm a-layin' fur him, drat his
. ole hide
understood from the above that it
was case of family feud, and as Mr..
Sammis looked like a good-natured
man yentured to ask him some lead
ing questions
''fo' see, it was this way" he slowly
replied. About six of us was gwine
home together one evenin' on horse
back. The ole man Blake was one OF
u.s. By and by he takes a bottle o.
whisky and says to Sam Davis: Sam,
wet yo'r whistle Sam he wet. Then
he says to Bill: Bill, wet yo'r whistle
Bill he wet. And he said the same to
all the others, except me. He never
axed me to wet my whistle. and didn't
wet. Consarn his pictur', but he meant
to insult me and I'm gwine to shoot
himr'
"Did you ever seek an explanation"
asked
''Of co'se not, Thar can't be no ex.
PLANTATION to it!''
''But think there can. Did it ever
occur to you that Mr.. Blake didn't
have whisky enough to go around, and
that the bottle was empty before it got
to you?"
"Shoo! Inever thought of that. Dog
gone my hide, but that may be the rea-
son.
HAS anyone been killed yet?"
no"
swell, met a man.they called Blake
down at the post office. He is an oldish
man with scar on his cheek and wears
a fur cap"
That's the critter. and I'm gwine
right down thar and pick fuss with
him"
''You wait until have asked him
question or two and brought his an
swers."
went down street and found Mr.
Blake in store. AS soon as l could
get opportunity L asked him if he re-
membered the circumstances, and
added:
Now, Mr.. Blake, why didn't you ask
Jim Sammis to wet his whistle as well
as the others?"4
''Bekase 1 couldn't" he replied.
carter Sam Davis had wet, and Bill
White had wet, and Tom Harper and
Joe Taylor and Charley Brown had
wet, thar wasn't even decent smell o.
whisky left in the bottle, and 1 didn't
want to hurt Jim Sammis' tender feel
ms. / was reckonin' on havin' him
stop at the house and drink from the
jug, but he drapped outer sight some
whar."
Fifteen minutes later [ had them to-
gether and shaking hands, and when
all had been explained, Mr.. Blake said;
Jim Sammis, yo' fiery ole cuss,
come down to the tavern and wet yo'I
whistle. and stranger, yo' blamed red
headed critter. come along with us,
and we'll feel SO blamed good that this
'ere town will hev to spread over two
miles of land to hold us!'-Detroit Free
Press.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
Literally True.

Flusher-Did Miss Gaygirl make any
remark when you handed her my
bouquet?
The Messenger-Yep; she said: ''oh,
the dear, dear flowers.
''Humph. That florist must have
sent the bill along with the bouquet. .
buffalo Courier.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
The Last Vows.

Seedy Nobleman - Are you sure
dearest, that you will always honor
my noble family?
American Heiress-Alwavs. And will
you always love and cherish my money?
while life lasts
''Then let the wedding bells ring
n " Weekly
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
Not Quick Enough.

Suffer (at the reception)-I think !
shall take Miss Springer down to sup
per when it's ready.
Dashaway-I wouldn't if l were you.
Stuffer-Why not?
Dashaway-She has an impeachment
in her walk.-Brooklyn Life.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
No Favors Asked.

Minnie-Why did Grace break off her
engagement?
May-Well, Harry said that he would
always be an indulgent husband. And
he refused to apologize.-Puck.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17

-Digler-'I courted my wife three
years before got her, and it was near
" all wasted time" Bigler-"Why.
isn't she a most excellent woman"
Dirler-s.She is, indeed; but I've dis
covered since that 1 could have got her
in three months if I had had the
sumption to ask for her.
Free Press
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
About What 1t Is.

Little Girl-What is You studyin'
nov;
Little Boy-General history.
s.what's it about?"
Generals, of course. Good Newa
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
No Cause fo- wonder.

Mrs Cawker-I wonder why drum
majors wear such frightfully big hats.
Mr.. Cawker-You wouldn't if you
could once see the size of drum
majors head Life.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17

The manufacture of candles was
greatly aided By the investigation Of
fats and oils, as the result Of Chevseul's
experiments
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
Facts.

A teacher having requested each of
her class of small boys to bring in three
items of information about the Hudson
river that they could prove to be facts,
received from a bright seven-year old
the following: 81 have lived neer Il.
I have sailed over it. have fallun into
it Facks. -Judre.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1895-01-17
The Matrimonial Knot,

One part of the wedding ceremony
among the Babylonians was very sig
nificant. The priest took a thread
from the garment of the bride and an
other from the garment of the bride
groom and tied them into knot,
which he gave to the bride. This is
probably the origin of the modern say
ing about tying the knot in regard te
marriage. Chicago Herald.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1895-08-14
SHORT LUMB Err .
Live Stock Market.

SHEEP AND LAMBs.-In lots, s26b2. 5O6I3 each; ex.
ira S3.oN945O, or from 2d41ac per ID; lambs, +15c
FAT Hoes. - Western fat swine, live, s65Isc ;
Northern dressed hogs. &c per b; stores, retail,
sl.5GG5
MARKET BHEF.-A few choice, s6lD7 IS; extra
s55ed575i first quality S51525; second quality
a+9+.5o; third quality, sa9s50.
STORE CATTLB-working oxen, per pair. from
See@l+o; farrow cows Slu9s2; fancy cows, S5O0b7
mich cows and calves S20648; yearlings. ss91l s.;
two years old Sl292z; three years old s2tGb32.
HIDES, TALLow AND SKINS. = Brighton hides,
19s1lc per ID tallow. SGD4c per ID country hides
6H91c per h tallow 2D2Lc per NJ wool pelts none
calf skins, 90cGsl ass sheared skins IS lOc; lam
skins, 3e6s60c; dairy Skins S0975c.
MILoH Cows-varous lots were turned over to
secondhand dealers. II. M Lowe sold mich
at e4s each; S: H. Wsrdwell sold milch at
s51each, springers at S45, and some at s2s935.
CATTLE.-Less than 100 head of Maine cattle ar
rived, hid these were wholly for store purposes
Butchers who came to market had to fall back on
western for their supply. Western cattle of the
better grades were trie sitter in price, but the
common grades were inactive and at shaded prices
The general tone of the market for beef was slow.
VEAL CALvEs.-The arrivals were not heavy, and
good qualities sold readily to meet requirements.
We look for good prices calves through the
month. II. NJ. Lowe sold II calves average los TBS,
at sac d NJ II. Wardwell sold Il calves, of 22s9
TBS, at 5sc q h; Libby Brothers sold 81 calves aver
age ls lbs; at 51tc q ID; Thompson Hanson sold at
S82; X. Connors sold calves of lilo bs at Sc v b.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1895-08-14
SubsOiling the Best Method.

While several remedies have been
proposed for lessening the injurious
effects of drouthy seasons, irrigation
seems to be most prominent. Many
experiments have been made and won
derful results accomplished, but there
are several reasons which will tend to
prevent it coming into general use.
First, is the scarcity of water; second,
the unevenness of the land; third, lack
of means to put in plant; fourth,
lack of experience and change Of farm
methods; fifth, the fact that in many
seasons there is sufficient moisture
from natural rainfall, causing enforced
idleness of the plant and return to
the ordinary methods of farming. TAX
ing all these difficulties into consider
alton, think the most practicable
remedy is subsoiling. There are few if
any seasons when good crops could not
be raised if the natural rainfall could
be retained by subsoiling. 1t has many
advantages over irrigation. A few
acres can be treated each year until the
whole farm has been gone over. No
expensive apparatus is needed. Three
heavy horses can run subsoiler six
teen inches deep. With lighter team,
use more horses. BY subsoiling twice,
the second time crosswise, the ground
can be stirred to depth Of twenty
inches at cost of not more than SO
per acre. This loosened ground will
hold an immense amount Of water,
which, instead of running off into
streams, is stored for future use. Ex-
perimepts the past wear have shown
that this treatment has doubled the
yield. When the subsoiling must be
repeated, it can be done for half the
original cost. One great advantage is
that it necessitates no change in the
methods of neutrality-suspicious. Agri-
culturist,
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1895-08-14

food of the soil, and the exhausted trees
and vines have but partial supply of
plant food with which to recover from
their work of fruit production.
A large crop takes from the soil
nearly all the elements of growth. As
stated, an application of phosphate will
be of advantage in the summer, but a
little later there should be given slight
dressing of potash. Early in the spring
more potash should be applied, followed
later by some heterogeneous fertilizer. By
this method there will be less loss dur
ing winter by rains, and the plant food
will be given at the most appropriate
periods. In an orchard grass crop
may be grown occasionally, when fer
tilizers are used literally, but the sod
should be turned under and the land
also we'll lined. 1t is the weeds that
do the damage, and especially to the
small fruits. 1t is not profitable to
postpone cultivation until spring, for
the most damage to the fruit crops is in
the fall.-Philadelphia Record.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1895-08-14
Assignee's S lie Of Real Estate

The undersigned. assignee of the insolyent estate
of f. j. George of Middesex. Vermont gives notice
that acting under order of the Court of Insolvency
for the District of Washington dated July 80, 1875,
made upon the petition of the undersigned
the insolvent, and the MORTGAGE creditor he will
sell at public auction at the f. j. George mill site,
at Shady Rill, in said Middesex August Is. 1895.
at ten o'clock in the forenoon, the following de
scribed real estate, situated in Washington county,
Vermont:
|. The f. j. George mill property, being about
thirty acres of pasture and tiage land, and nclud
ing the insovents homeste interest therein, in
Il northery part of lot No IA in the fourth divsi
of lots in Mddlesex, and two other small parcels of
land adjoining thereto Said property includes the
George mill privilege on the Martin brook and two
dwelling houses standing OIL the Ian de cribed
2. Thirty acres of wood land in Middesex, lying
east and adjoining land of Alonzo Leonard and the
Mallory farm, so called.
8 The small parcel of land and the mill privilege
thereon on the Martin brook, above the bridge at
Shady Rill, in Middesex.
4. Twenty.nine acres of land known MS the Vaughn
property22 acres being the southwe 'terly part of
sex and acres being long strip off the north side
of lot No. 81 in said fourth division.
g. The northerly half of lot No. AZ in the fourth
division of lots in Middlesex original right of Eben
Garfield Oess II acres sold o supposed to con-
tain Az acres, known the Hyde lot
g. All of lot No AZ, in the fourth division, original
right of Matthias Ross supposed to contain loo
also about ~ acres more being ii rods down on lot
No. Al in said division
T. The southeasterly corner of lot in Worcester,
called the Governors Right" wood land, supposed
to be 1876 acres and formerly owned by Horatio Tenn
peton.
Dated at Montpelier. VT, July 80, 1895,
GEORGE w. PARMENTER,
Assignee of estate of F. j. George, Insolvent Debtor
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1895-08-14
A Paying Business.

The most salable farm animal to .day
is 6rst-cass dairy COW. We often
wonder why more farmers do not make a
business of raising heifers of good
milking strains to supply milkmen in
milk producing counties. Let the
mich COW pass the first two years of
her life on cheap land, and not try to
pay interest on costly land until she is
able to give milk. Last year we told of
a Massachusetts farmer who takes his
heifers by rail to cheap pastures in
Maine every spring, wintering them on
grain, hay, and oil and cottonseed meals.
These heifers are sold to milkmen with
their first calf We believe that man
could, in few years, establish repu-
tation for good milking stock and be
assured of a steady income. Some
men can make this pay better than Or
binary dairying.-Troy Times.
The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1895-08-14
AGRICULTURAL.
A Harvest Song.

Behind the scythes a trodden path.
Bind, bind the sheaves.
Wide and wider grows the swath
Either side the bright corn heaves
Billows of gold.
Trees a glory of bronze and red,
Bind, bind the sheaves
Misty sunshine overhead.
Through the chequer Of thinning leaves
The air is cold
Breath of the coming frost is there,
Bind, bind the sheaves.
Vines that cling to the house grow bare
Swallows leave their nests in the caves
Empty and old.
Apple globes, crimson and white,
Bind, bind the sheaves.
Winnowed grain, sunnily bright
Gathering gold that want relievesl
The wide bins hold.
Fill the fiagon up to the brim.
Bind, bind the sheaves,
Until the foam runs over the rim
ut mellowed long where the spider
weaves
In dusk and mold.)
FIJI and drink the cider clear,
Bind, bind the sheaves.
Bid farewell to the passing year,
Close the book with blotted leaves.
Their tale Is told.
Meth Boyoe IN Outing