The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1895-04-05

Mr.. Allen has a large stock of fresh
stories on hand and he always takes
great pleasure in entertaining his listen
ers by telling them. While they are
convulsed with laughter, his face Is as
calm and serene as the countenance OF
philosopher or professor of theology.
While the house, during its last ses-
sion, had under consideration what
was known as the seigniorage bill, Mr..
Allen spoke in favor of that measure,
but depressed to make n few remarks
concerning a speech which Abraham S.
Hewitt, of New York, had delivered at
banquet, in the course of which Mr..
Hewitt had severely criticised the peo-
pie of the south. Mr.. Allen said: II do
not think that any man ought to be
held down to very rigid account for
an after-dinner speech at banquet.
Why, sir, 1 recollect not long ago I
went to banquet in Baltimore where
everything was so good, where 1 was
surrounded by so many big rich men
that by the time my turn came to
speak 1 felt so well that 1 addressed
them as fellow capitalists.
This bright saying elected applause
and laughter, which continued for some
little time. Mr.. Allen then referred to
q speech which had been made In Bal
timore by Congressman Patterson, of
Tennessee, in reply to ex-Mayor Hew-
lit, in which Col. Patterson had made
q number of very incorporate and
heated assertions. Mr.. Allen, refer
ring 10 the Patterson-Hewitt speech,
said: Being aware of the influence
surrounding banquet, If 1 did not
know of the abstemious habits of my
friend from Tennessee. / would have
thought on reading his speech that he
had gotten somewhat under the inf1u-
ences that affected another Tennes-
seean that a travelling man told me
about meeting once in Tennessee.
This travelling man was sitting on a
counter talking to merchant about
selling him goods; he and the merchant
got into q general conversation, and
among other things he said to the mer-
chant: L used to sell these goods down
in Kaufman county, Tex
AT this, seedy, ragged. handbook
ing fellow who was sitting on the same
counter, said: My friend, did you say
you had lived in Kaufman county, Tex?'
Yes, sir
Ibid you ever know a man out
there by the name of John F. Will
liams?'
"'Oh, yes; used to sell John goods
"'Well, sir, he IS my brother
"'Ah! l am glad to meet you
"'Yes, sir, John Williams is my
brother. How was John when you saw
him?'
"'Oh, John was doing very well. He
had good farm, with plenty of stock
on it; he was out of debt and doing
we'll
"'Well, my friend, if you should be
back in Kaufman county at any time,
and see anything of John, wish you
would tell HIM that 1 am mighty hard
up, that my farm is mortgaged, and l
do not believe that am ever going to
be able to raise and educate my chill
dren. Times are mighty hard with me,
and l do not see any chance to get out
of debt; and if he is ever going to help
me, now is the time
After awhile this travelling man felt
like taking a drink, and he invited
Johns brother out to take drink with
him When the drink began TO have
its effect, the man said: SO you know
my brother John out in Texas? Well,
when you go out there, say that am
getting along tolerably well, that l
amt making any great money, but 1
am doing pretty we'll
They sauntered around awhile, and
the travelling man asked his acquaint-
ance to take another drink Then the
fellow began to warm up. He said:
so you know my brother John out in
Kaufman county, Tex. Well, If you
are out there at any time, just tell him
that am making good living and am
getting along first rate