Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1895-11-07
DOOLEY DISCUSSES SUICIDE.

He Tells What on Old German Told
Him i'm Favor of Ii.
"Jawn. said Mr.. Dooley, dye be-
Geye I'm suicide?'
81 don't think there's much in it,
said Mr. Mckeuua.
"Nayther do T." said Mr. Dooley.
though / niver thried it, III ya die we
so Co 'ell an if ye live ye go TO th Bride
Well an Ills case akel. They've got We
coin am comm. But I heerd a story
las night that was tOl' me by Schwartz
ueister. an If twas me it happened to
au 10 wasn't again me religion they
be h00kiu me out iv tn branch with
me pockets full iv sardine cans an OF
shoes. They wud so.
"Ill not tell We tn way Schwartz
meis-er toll me. fr he talks with q
br0gue as thick as a dale board, but
lawn or tn ACCENT twas this way.
They was % man here, q German man,
and he was fair rolling i'm money.
lie had slathers iv TT I'm O bank down
town. Another German awned Tn
bank. an tn two was thick an ct their
Wis-phalyan ham an dhrunk their
suits together am wint To- German pic
MICS an voted tn same ticket.
well. the first German. he was
young man an gay, IKE you. Jawn. an
Dee med up his mind was too slow walt
in Tr tn kline TO come iv twinty thou
san year 90 o time an ne whit TO
thradiu I'm stock. Nav twas not at
III ya-ards. I haven't it right in me
mind where or what IL was, though
Schwauzme Ister explained it all 10 me;
but. anyhow. it had 10 do with th
sthreet railroad an twas th intention
iv this here young German f'r 90 take
1T~. Yo-krss am stand him on his head.
"Naw. JaWn. I don't know Yerkuss-
He doesn't DO his dhriukin' here an
he's mo- more 90 me than I am 20 him.
But if liver 1 so ON 20 rob amy wan
III make arrangements with lerKuss
To- divide up TN territory an thin / IL
watt till he's out iv town.
"AIl whit Wen with th' young Ger
man. lie piled MP th money Jill he
had near o million bucks an Oh OF
German was in with him. They dldn {
s-on with that. Let's go out says the
OF German. Nav says tn young
wan. Wen stick. he says What S
millions saws he. Wen make twin
ty an quit he says.
"Wan day there come change
Down whit IN stock am down whit IN
million like O. piece of Ice IN @ blast
furnace 'H0I on. says tn young
man. 'Niver say die, he says. An. IN
or German he put up more money.
Twas n0wt enough. Though he
tunnel with the east wind. lt dlsap-
poarel an tn stock Wiut down and
down
EVAN summer afternoon the young
/ German wint 90 tn bank an IN OF
/ German was settn' at his desk cuJllh
chin ye'er little finger nail We'll he
/ SAYS. ''tis all up says he. w lat S
I that" says tn young man. We re
| rooned. says tn OF German. They Sc
nawthin left in tn bank but th desks
am they'se nowthin left FIR me but
wan thing An he kissed his wife
goodbv an thrw himself into tn dhrink
amt whin ne comes out mp be tn ma
rine 'ospital divvle tn bit he cared
whether stocks was mp or down.
TIL young German ne went to see
tn WILDLY woman. Well says she,
they've found tn goOd man. she SAYS.
He's dead. Il know it, says me. III
breaks me heart. he says. We've no
money she says. Dear. oh. dear,
saws he. We took it firm u.s. says She.
4 know it,. says he But what can
do2' ne SAYS. i have naWthln, says
be. we can do what DE done, says
She. .What2' SAYS ne. Wis, she says.
.ye can dhrown yeerself. Thin she
stood ND facin' him with her ar-rms
folded acrost her breast an says she:
Tr thev'se one dhrOp iv German blood
fr yoer heart ven stop r. no wan De-
chuue here an tn lake. Il am a Ger
man. Die SAYS I know me jooty an
I'M do IT, An ne whit away.
Did ne DO ito" Mr. McNenna asked
with some show interest.
CHE took O ca-ar. Mr.. Dooiey went
on needless of the interruption, an
shtood outside on tn platform smokn
his las c,ga-ar.' Twas q nice day an
rh' skv was blue. He thought ~ IN
schoo-zenfest an iv new brand oil
Rhine wine put I'm be Jansen an IN
masked ball at Turner hall. Thin says
he 90 himself. Il suppose I've got 10 40
ito I'm be q long time. but us me
fre-v I'm q German. But. anyhow,
herse time enough. TN dhrown me
+ sim. slowly. an In begin by dhrownin
me- grief. Jawn. where DE suppose
they found him.
At Willow Springs
"Ssre biz: behind % bOcrd tince In
th' Thrty-fourth wa-ar. An he's
around town to-day. an rs lively a
corpse heuin politics. as ye'd meet in
davis walk"
well" said Mr.. McEenna, philO-
+ sophially. "givc him time give him
j time. believe You'd push him OF the
T bridge IF you met him.
Nav. said Nr. Doolev. "But I
I don't mind te.in' ye I'd lane up agin
/ him. Chicago Post
/ THEY COULD NOT BRIGHTEN HER
Brave Little Colonial Maiden Who De-