davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Very Frank,

Prison Visitor. seem an honest
fellow. and feel an interest in you.
Gould anything be done to make you
more cOmforta BILE?
Convict-You bet,
Visitor-What?
Convict,-Lemnie out,
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Tho Safe Side.

Judge. if you were sober
when arrested, why didn't you renon-
strate with the officer.
Prisoner. = Please your Honor,
hadn't enough money with me to pay
fine and surgeons bill, too.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
: ccordinS to Law.

Judge to Witness. Now, madam,
want you to distinctly understand that
hearsay is not evidence. How old are
you?
Witness don't know, Judge
Judge-Don't know?
Witness have no evidence OF my
age.
Judge-What do you mean?
81 am told that am so many years
old, Judge. but it's only hearsay. and
you know that isn't evidence
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Hard Lines,

81 like my eggs billed hard" says he,
can cider hard as hard can be;
But times an work that's hard b
gosh!
Is what don't suit yer Uncle Josh.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

The great beauty of the city fat is
that it doesn't cost the tenent half his
income TO keep a lawn clipped.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
A Midnight Meeting.

Brute Brady las preliminary for a
forced loan).-Say, young teller, gim-
me some fire. will yer?
Jack Potts presenting pistol. Cert
Say when.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
s. Cent Pdtt6rnS Tor 10 Gents.

These patterns retail in fashion bazaars and
stcres for twenty live to forty cents each, but
in order to increase the demand among strapg-
erS we offer them TO the lady readers OF this
paper for the remarkably low price of only 10
Cents Each. Postage one cent extra.
The patterns are all Of the very latest New
York styles, and are uneqUaled for style accu-
racy OF fit, simplicity and economy. For twenty
four years these patterns have been used the
Country over. Full descriptions and directions
as the number OF yards OF material required,
the number and names OF the different pieces in
the pattern. how 10 cut and tit and put the gar
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
A Good Reason.

Customes,-Your ten-cent shine isn't
as good as your five-ceut one
Bootbla ck.-I know it, sir; that's the
reason l charge more. They injure
my reputation
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Darkest New york.

"Why do they always take prison
er's money from him before locking
him in a cell at the police station?'
$50 as to prevent him buying hi,
way out"
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

A French professor of boxing has ar
rived in New York, and will give a
series of exhibitions prior to his en-
gagement with Maillard as a candy
packer.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Both Sides,

Tenent You know I'd never have
leased this house, as it has no yard, if
you hadn't told me the cellar was such
fine place for the children to play.
Now find the cellar is full of water
all the time.
Landlord. Have patience, Madam!
1t will soon freeze over: and then think
what nice private rink you'll have!
Goes Cough BaIsam
Is the oldest and best. IL viii break up Cold quick
er than anything else. IL is always reliable. Try it,
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
1000 BUS. POTATOES PER ACRE.

Wonderful yields in potatoes, oats,
corn, farm and vegetable seeds. Cut
this out and send sc postage to the
John A. Salzer Seed Co., La Crosse,
Wis, for their great seed book and
sample of Giant SpuIwy wnu
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

Why don't the people who want
everything shut up on Sunday, start
the performance by shutting up-them-
selves.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

L.
five sizes, viz: 6. 10, u, II and l6 years.
The mode here presented illustrates the Van
dyke style OF trimming now so popular. Certse
hecked camels hair On mode cloth is fashion
ably combined with full yoke OF eerise satin,
yelled with mode chiffon. The stylish trimming
consists OF hands OF black ribbon velvet The
fanc1ful yoke Is gathered at the neck and
ranged over the fitted body at pointed yoke
depth Stylish revers finish the lower edges at
tack and front. The bodice is included In the
under arm seams and trimmed with velvet, the
trimming being carried around the back to sim
ulate straight belt, as shown. The pointed
belt can be omitted in favor OF a round outline
II so preferred Full leg omutton sleeves are
mounted with caps that point on each edge and
meet the reyers back and front, forming a
stylish outline, the Vandyke effect being car
r1ed out in the cuffs that finish the wrists. A
chiffon yelled bow of satin Is worn at the neck
and handsome pearl buttons decorate the
sleeve cap and cuffs. The full round skirt
has EandyRe trimming OF velvet the upper
edge being gathered and sewed TO lower edge OF
waist The costume closes invisibly in center
back with hooks and eyes.
Many charming combinations can be devel-
oped By the mode, which is suitable for any
dress fabric.
The retail price OF pattern is 25 cents
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Deferred Settlement

Highwayman. Your money or your
life.
Mr.. Slowpay.-At-I'm sorry to say
I'm out of funds just now; but can,t
we compromise matters? Suppose
give you little thirty-day note?
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
New Editorial Desk.

Poet.-Is the editor in?
Office Boy.-No. sir. Ye can see fer
yerself dat his desk is closed.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Turn About.

For Whooping Cough, Piso's Cure is a
successful! remedy.-M. P. DIETER, G7
Throop Ave, Brooklyn \. Y, Nov. IA, '94.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

The man who blows out the gas on
retiring, usually goes cut himself, soon
afterward
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
CITY GoxcTmcnt's Criterion.

City Governments Criterion
Citizen. streets OF New YORK
are in dis graceful condition.
Oficial.-Tut! Tut! They are nan
thin teh the bog roads of Oireland.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

|
When Answering Advertisements
KindlY Mention this Paper.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

Stone walls do not a Safe Deposit
make,
Nor iron bars valuable cage.
Unless an expert view you sometimes
take,
OF what is written on the cashiers
page.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
at West Point.

Instructor.-G1ve the rule for APP
proximate calculation of horizontal
distance,
Plebe (from New York City, conf
dently).-Twenty blocks to the mile.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Ready for Qualification.

The electric light wire will soon be
entitled to rank with the oil-can, the
blow out gas, and the gun that is not
loaded.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
If You Will Cut This Out and Send 1t


"He got into financial straits, did HI
not?"
"Worse than that. They were crook
eds"
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
"FALLING OF WOMB. /"

Mrs. FRANK CAM
FIELD, of East Dickfn-
son, Franklin Co., ~.
T., writes " I deem it
my duty to express my
deep, hearth graft
tude to you for having
been the means, under
Providence, of restor-
ing me 10 health. for I
have been by spells I'M
able to walk. My
troubles were of the
womb - infianlnatory
and bearing down SEN
sations and the doctors
all said, they could not
cure me.
Twelve bottles of Dr..
Pierce's wonderful F.
has cured me. -
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

Over the Garden Wall-broken glass
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
An E1dOrsennp

An Endorsement.
Old Hayseed is a simple wight,
Quite far, indeed, from sage.
think that man very right
Who said his was "a green old age. -
If the Baby is Cutting Teeth.
Be suro and use that old and welltried remedy Mrs
WNsLow's SOOTHING SYRUP for Children Teethina-
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

2GS BUS DANNERS YELLOW ONIONS
We're grown by John l.. Rath, East
Saginaw, from one pound of seed.
This tremendous yield, at the rate OF
1,0ls bushels per acre, Mr.. Rath says
was only possible because he used Sal
zer's seeds. We understand that Mr.
Salzer's seeds are the earliest in the
world, especially his beets, carrots
cabbage, cucumbers, onions, peas, corn
radishes, tomatoes, ETC., and that he
sells to market gardeners and farmer:
at lowest wholesale prices.
If You Will Cut This Out and Send 1t
with 81 money order to the John a
Salzer Seed company, La Crosse, Wis.
you will get free thirty-fve package:
earliest vegetable seeds and their won
derful catalogue, or for 10 cents il
stamps package above Prize Danver
Onions and their catalogue free. wnl
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

Cool and Bracing-T The Bunco-Steer
or.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
1.-THE BABY cutting Teeth
ON The ROAD

y to recovery, the
young woman
who is taking
Doctor Pierce's
Favorite Pre-
scription. In
naidenhood, wo-
, manhood, wife
. hood and moth
> erliood the " Pre-
/, scription +" IS a
). supporting tonic
h and nervine
Y that's peculiarly
adapted TO her
needs, regulating,
-engtheuing and cur
z the arrangements
IVrT
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

"Iranson's Magic Corn Sa1ve."
Warranted TO money refunded. Ask your
druggist for il. Price Is cents.
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

ACRE APPLES, $l,493 M MsD SnCnhMDs.
Louisiana Mo- for free Eampie copy telling about IT,
practical Fruit and Farm paper, published by
Stark Bros, acc year; circulation, 400 eco copies
The Cream OF the Cream"-gives the busy Fruit
Grower or Farmer, who hasn't the time or the money
buy and read great mass of papers what Is best
from them all, what he wants to know,
what would take him days to search out for himself
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06
Patents, Trademarks.

Examination and Advice to PateDtability OF
Iuyenton Send for Inventors Guide, or How TO Get
aPstent" PATRICK oFARzELL. wAsETEay1E, D. c
Barbour County index. [volume] (Medicine Lodge, Kan.) 1880-current, 1895-02-06

again this week. EASA
Great Bend Register.-Our people.
are now confident that great year is
in store for Barton county and her
people. We have had three weeks of
snow and wheat was never known to
be in better condition.
Colonel Richard Bonticou Morris,
collector of internal revenue for Kan
sas is said to bear striking resem-
blance to Rev. T. s. Hodgson, presid-
ing elder of the Larned Methodist
conference,
Business is so brisk with the Chau.
tauqua Broom Company of Sedan that
they have been forced to decline an or
der for two car loads of brooms.
The Marquette creamery has been
turned into q slaughter house. Thus,
saws the Tribune ends the seventh
and last chapter of the butter bust.
ness at Marquette.
Choice country butter is selling at
ten cents a pound in Chautauqua
county.
Some Topeka men will drill Horton
amateurs in military play next
month.
M. S. Ehrenfeld will remove his
wooden mill from Kanopolis to Salina.
A car load of children arrived al
Fredonia last week from New Yort
City. They are orphans and were
brought to Kansas to be placed under
the protection of worthy people.
Chetopa Democrat: Farmers whc
sell their grain in this city are receiv
ing higher price than those who sci
in almost any other town in southeas
Kansas Wheat Is worth ~ to A
cents and corn "a to IS cents A
Neodesha corn is selling at % cent
| and at Coffeyville at 30 cents.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-05-10

They are telling a pretty fair story
on Uncle Phil'' Armour, just home
from his European trip.
The story is in two chapters, with a
period of thirty years elapsing between
the two.
Thirty years or more ago p. D.
Armour was a young man attending
an academy near Syracuse. y. Y.
There was Il ladies' en'nary near by,
and one beautiful moonlight night
Philip slipped away from his dor
mitory and took a pretty seminary
girl ont for n long buggy ride.
II came TO the ears Of the dlgnified
faculty and a sentence of expulsion
was entered up against 7. D. Armour.
Years passed on. Young Armour
came 10 Chicago and became the
greatest merchant IN the world.
One day an old man with a pair OF
white side whlskers and 4 professions
al beatific smile was ushered into Mr..
Armour's private office.
You remember the -- academy,
Mr.. Armour" his visitor began.
II should say did. l was expelled
from that institution for taking Susie
out buggy riding
W ell. lueu. perhaps spu iOhitAhcNA
me. am Prof. -. | was mem
Der of the faculty then. as / am now
And ! want 10 say. Mr.. Armour, that
l always protested against your ex
puls.on as being unjust and unwar
ranted by the facts. BY the way. Mr.
Armour. the academy is in a financial
strait Just now and came to see il
you would give us some assistance"
We'll" replied the millionaire, "ii
you protested against my expulsion al
have TO say is that you have been
long time in letting me know about it.
But Mr.. Armour made out good
round check. just the same, and sen
the old pedagogue on his way rejoic
ing.-Chicago Mail.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-05-10
I.L
Aluminium violins.

Prof. Alfred Springer treated the
scientists at the convention of the
American Association for the Advance
ment Of Science TO a lecture on alum
mum vio,ins. A musician played on
the instrument which was shaped like
n wooden violin. The body Is made
of aluminium, but the neck and keys
are wooden. my experiments" said
Prof. Springer, ".ncline me to believe
that the real cause Of the superiority
of the old wooden instruments over
new ones Is not so much in the in
creased elasticity of the wood or the
composition of the varnish as In the
peculiar warping OF the wood to a
higher arch, buckling caused by the
position OF the 4 holes and sound
posts, which may be obtained by using
aluminium"
The instrument produced a great
volume of tone, but there was va.
riety OF opinions Is 10 Tvs quality.
Some musicians declared that the
quality was not as good as a wooden
one for solo work. but that II would
prove good in orchestra work. Others
took the opposite side of the question
entirely. while a few predicted that IN
4 few years aluminium vlo-ins will be
substituted for the wooden instru
ments.-New York Commercial.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-05-10
FACTS IN FEW WORDS.


One Of the latest inventions is an
electrical rocking chair.
Many of the best diamond cutters in
the world are Americans.
A ton Of good coal is said to yield
about 5000 feet purified gas.
The list of Chicago's 400 has been
published, and contains 10000 names.
Roman lamps were of gold, silver,
iron. bonze, copper, lead and earthen-
ware.
The Presbyterians are not super
stitious people; they have thirteen
theological seminaries.
Bicycles and electricity have spoiled
the horse trade. Horses were never
so cheap as they are now.
1t is estimated that two years are
required for the Gulf water to travel
from Florida to the coast Of Norway.
Mr.. Clemens has a quite remarkable
popularity in England. The Mark
Twain Birthday Book" for example,
has gone into its eighth edition.
California has one OF the most re-
markable timber belts in the world.
tanning 1913 ,000, 100000 feet of timber.
When a Chinese lady approaches a
muddy place, she beckons a boy. The
boy drops on his hands and knees In
the mud and the lady uses him as a
stepping stone. for which service she
gives him a small coin.
Rats must have access to water or
they die. A trapped rat may easily
be tanned by allowing no water but
that offered in a spoon, for the crea-
ture soon learns to recognize the hand
which supplies this all-important ne
cessity.
There is a tree in Western Australia
called the jarrah tree, the wood OF
which is said to be almost everlasting.
The natives make nearly everything
of this timber-pianos. work boxes
wharves, buildings, and ships. 1t has
never been known to decay, and Is
poisonous to all insects. 1t does not
burn freely, but only chars, which
makes 1t specially valuable for build
ing purposes.
A herd Of wild cattle has been roam
ing the mountains between Rogue
river and the South Fork of the Um-
pqua, in Oregon. for twenty years, and
it now numbers in the neighborhood oi
500 cattle. They are wild as deer and
difficult to approach. The practical
harm they work is that gentle cattle
belonging to farmers are enticed of
and join this wild band. 1t is pro-
posed now to round them up and Kill
them.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-05-10
Eace Massage Folly.

Massage operators never rub the face
dry. They use the softest linen avail
able and absorb the water, spongs
fashion. In making up the face, after
the greasing, rubbing, washing and
rinsing. the professional masseur dabs
or sponges it dry and applies a deli.
cate emo.lient made OF honey almond
cream or a teaspoonful of rose water
with one drop of benzoin and two
drops OF glycerine. This Is 10 softer
and heal the sore skin. A paint brush
is dipped IN liquid rouge, and the faint
est tint Is put in the lips, ears. chir
and nostrlls. Then the face and neck
are busted with a powder tinted tC
suit the complexion; the brows art
lined in bit. and there you are witt
a bill OF 81, So or So. according to the
presumption or pretension of the face
washer.-New York World.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-05-10
WISE AND OTHERWISE.

Tie barking dog didn't stop the
train, but he thinks he did.
Error loves to walk arm in arm with
truth, to make itself thought respect
able.
Guns are only human, after all.
They will kick when the load becomes
too heavy.
Don't forget that good reputation
will go farther with your grocer than
sanctimony.
1t does not take the last drink to
make a drunkard-but the first
Rams Horn.
Never lean on the world; for If you
do, the world will jump aside, and you
will get tumble.
What do you say now when you
try to pass lady?" "'By your sleeve,
madam to be sure"
Horse-racing being the sport Of
kings, it's no wonder that the kings
are all borrowing money.
youth, Young man, wish l were
what you think yourself to be-"
A handsome woman always sees
something pretty in a shop window
with a mirror at the back Of It.
There is no one so innocent as not
to be evil spoken OF; there is no one
so wicked as to merit all condemna-
ton.
The mind Of bigot Is like the pu-
pill Of the eye; the more light you pour
upon it the more it contracts.-O. W.
Holmes.
There Is full compensation for fail
ure in every true life, and the highes,
where the struggle and the loss have
been the deepest
When Lord Sidmouth one day said
My brains are gone to the dogs thii
morning" his friend at once ejaculat
ed, Poor dogsw
1.-TWO heads may be better than one
under some circumstances" mutteret
the bass drum, but they have brought
me nothing but sound beatings."
Cicero, it Is said, had a theory tha
any disease could be overcome by fast
ing, and often abstained from food To-
days at time, drinking only water.
MY wife makes little money go {
long ways these times" so doe
mine, unfortunately. She's alway
subscribing for missions in Africa ant
Polynesia"
No matter how good the deacon is
he will always look wise and please
If anybody suggests that he was
pretty lively young fellow when h
was boy, is the observation Of tn
Somerville Journal.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-05-10
Robbed of Her Horns,

One thing which has changed the
appearance of the country greatly in
the dairying region is the practice, now
very prevalent. of "dehorping" cattle.
The farmers of northern New Eng
,and seem 10 have made the sudden
discovery that horns on cows were a
gigantic mistake Of the creator, to
be remed.ed radically and at once.
They say that the cows, IL horned.
hook each other dreadfully when they
are watering, and rattle their horns
together in the stanchlons, and other
wise misconduct themselves. so they
get n 'dehOrn!ng machine" and fas-
ten the poor cows neck To il, and with
one swoop deprive her OF her chief or
naments and her natural protection,
and leave her wretched, shorn crea-
tlre. that no artist would think OF
painting. The loss Of her horns seems
10 turn the COW into kind of sheep
ish and furtive being; she has not the
confident and self-satisfied air that
usually marks her kind. One has no
idea of the difference which horns
make in the expression of cattle until
he sees a herd Of these dehorned and
deformed animals.-Boston Transcript
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-05-10
TooTS FROM THE RAMS HORN.

Money talks" but 1t often fails to
tell the truth.
1t takes more courage to endure than
it does to act.
Never did any harm, Ell? Well,
neither did rotten egg.
The man who would be strong In
mind must feed on facts.
It is hard to please the man who
never knows what he wants.
The more polish you put on a mean
man the better the devil is suited
A great deal of stealing is being
done that does not go by that name.
A moderate drinker is like a man
who sleeps on the brink of a precipice.
The man who is constantly thinking
evil finds thousand ways to speak it.
When you go to war with a snake.
the battle ought to be with the end
where the head is.
1t takes both grace and grit to get
along pleasantly with people who
never make mistakes.
A lie is often told without saying a
word, by putting the rotten apples In
the bottom OF the basket.
The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1895-05-10
web,ter's Great disappointment.

Webster's last speech in Washington
was made from the portico of his
mansion in response TO serenade
Civeu by some os his admirers, who
were more Jealous than considerate.
The news of Gen. Scotts nomination
Of President had just been received.
Webster had failed of the nomination,
and the failure had broken his heart.
1t was beautiful, starlit evening,
and Webster, appearing before his
friends, said a few words compliment
tary TO Gen. Scott. for whom, in fact,
he had great contempt: then. turning
away from the subject of politics and
the nomination. he said: Gentlemen,
this IS magnificent night" Then he
apostrophized the stars and the planets
revolving in their orbits in one of those
splendid fights OF oratory of which he
alone was capable. Then. suddenly
descending from the skies 10 earth. he
said: Il now bid you good night.
shall retire to my couch TO rest in un.
troubled sleep. and on the morrow the
lark will not rise more jocund TO greet
tha rising sun than l shall" 1t was
the speech Of a politician. He praised
Scott. whom he despised, and he
sought 10 convey the impression that
ne did not take 20 heart his failure to
receive the nomination. when. in fact
IL was the greatest d appointment OF
his life Four months later he died al
Marshte!d.-Spr!ngdeld Republican.