The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1895-06-12
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

You can easily flll the public eyes if
you'only have the dust. Texas Sift-
ings.
In Company of Artists "What is
there between laughter and tears?"
"The nose" dryly observed Vivler.-
LIE Figaro.
81 guess L know why they call idols
fool" said Bobbie. cts because they
sit still all the time and do nothing"
-Harper's Bazaar.
Jones-Brown-"Why do you go
into society?" Brown-Jones - "To
find wife. And you?" Jones-Brown
ITO get away from one. Life.
Jones-"How's Wheeler getting
along since he bought a bicycle?"
Brown-"On crutches, believe. -
Columbus (Ohio) City and Country.
Mack-"Was the girl Higbee mar
ried considered q good match?" Rob-
bins-'1 imagine so. She fires up at
the least provocation. Buffalo Life.
love is ever at Loves side"
Writes the poet True The elf
Often is so sorely tried
He must be beside himself.
-Harper's Dazar
Higbee-"Why do you ask me for
information if you consider me such
an ignoramusP" Mrs. Higbee-"I
merely wish to prove it.".-Harlem
Life.
Indignant Passenger-"You won't
take this dime, hey? That's queer"
Street Car Conductor-"Not SO bad as
that. It's Canadian. Fare, please /"
Chicago Tribune.
"Will you have the chicken
dressedP" asked the poulterer. ''No,"
replied young Mrs. Hunnimune; ''you
may send it to me---er---in the alto
gether. w.. Washington Star.
On the japanese, Warship: First
Officer.--"There's a cruiser reported
little ahead" Second Officer. -"Chin-
eseP" First Officer.--"No, sir. She's
headed this way" Using Sing Courier.
"How many times are you going to
pass by me before you bring me that
beefsteak9" asked an indignant guest
of a passing waiter. ''Count them
yourself, sir; I'm too busy. "--Texas
Siftings.
Mrs. Kicksey-"I see by the head
line in this paper that Spain has her
hands full" Kicksey eyes, and if
she fools with this country she'll have
her whole anatomy full>-of holes, -
Philadelphia Inquirer.
Terrible Revenge: Gomez---'T say,
was it You who recommended that
cook to my wifeP" Perez---"I believe
So" Gomez "Then l should like
you to come and have supper with us
tonight, LA Gacela de Malaga.
Harry. Don't you know, Carrie,
it always seems to me that it must be
an awfully awkward thing for lady
to carry a muff " Carrie---"Oh, it is
not such difficult thing when you get
your hand in. "-.-Boston Transcript.
Little Sister," of the articles
in your paper this month is awful
poor" Little Brother (editor of ANA
teur paper) --"I know 1t; but the boys
that wrote 'em sent stamps for their
return an l needed the stamps" -
Tit-Bits.
Adam Dunn-"Good morning, Mr..
Wunt; l have called to collect that
little bill" Willy Wunt-"And so
you are collector, too / have no
doubt l have one of yours among my
collection. What do you care to pay
for it?"-Boston Transcript.
"My mother-in.law never under
stands joke" says correspondent.
80 l was surprised to received let
ter from her few weeks after my lit
tie boy had swallowed farthing, in
which the last words were, Has Ernest
got over his financial difficulties yet?"
Tit Bits
eff it be true that he laughs best who
laughs last, " says a philosopher, "the
must be the best laugher,
for" the philosopher adds, experience
teaches the observer that the Eaglish-
man does not begin to laugh at joke
until every one else has forgotten it. "
-Harper's Bazaar.
"The peculiar thing about this boa
ladies and gents, said the
keeper, sis that it requires a young
chicken about once week. 1t is not
dangerous except when hungry. Ii is
very particular about what it eats,
ladies' and gents, ana that young man
that's smoking a cigarette can approach
he cage with perfect impuuity. It
won't touch him. Chicago Tribune.
damon Mines OF Brazil.