Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-12-05
DELIcATEssen sMAcKs.
Shrewd Students of Cuisine Are These
Who Know Hr~ TO Sell Goods.

Who Know Hr~ TO Sell Goods.
We're the men who keep delicates-
sen stores born with their lips
smacking? If not, they must have
acquired the habit soon after birth,
or they would not be able to throw
so much JUNCTION into the smack as
they do when they are pointing out
the savory qualities of the various
articles in the stores. The delicates-
sen man has watery eye, a rubi-
ound cheek and mouth that seems
to taste everything he has for sale.
He takes long carving knife in his
hand and delicately touches with its
point piece of boiled ham.
Very good, he says confiden-
TALLY as he looks from you to the
ham. The best ham / ever tasted.
(Smack.) Try piece of this.
He cuts off a thin slice some two
inches square, and as you put it into
your mouth he smacks his lips to
give it flavor and looks at you ex-
pectantly with his liquid eyes.
Should you say you don t care much
about the ham he looks mildly hurt
and digs up piece of cheese from a
silvery covering, letting off a volley
of smacks as he does so.
There, he says. that is piece
of honeysuckle from age, made
among the mountains of Afghanis-
tan, with dash of the bouquet that
was so much in demand in Turkey
in the days of the great Ali Bey. :"
Smack
He says all this with solemnitv,
though you know he is inventing
the whole story, and gives you piece
of cheese that curls up the edge of
the cheese knife with its strength as
he smacks his lips and seems to
think you should be carried away by
the delicacy. You are almost, for it
is strong enough to carry away any
thing, and he sees that it is not a
success.
But he is not beaten, for he brings
out pickles from half dozen wood
en- bowls, with an average of three
smacks for each bowl, and hands the
samples to you in a saucer, request
ing you to Just taste that pickle,
and I'm sure you will say it is de-
licious. . (Smack.>
The delicatessen man has a way of
saying Deliciousr' that is almost
as satisfying as a Delmonico feast,
and you know, when you taste the
pickle while he smacks his sympa-
thy, that it cannot be as good as his
Deliciousr'
The pickle is really very pleasant,
and you buy dimes worth of it,
while he smacks his way to the pile
of paper in which to wrap the wood
en- dish and smacks as he gives you
40 cents in change out of your half
dollar.
You take up your pickle, but the
delicatessen man has not done with
you yet He smacks over a highly
spiced jar of funny shaped fish and
then cunningly leads your attention
to some preserves, and some salad
dressing, and some aromatic vine
gar, and some fresh tomatoes, and
some particularly good coffee that
he has just bought that morning, as
he tells you, and, what with the
whiffs of different things and his
smacks and his seductive talk, by
the time you leave the store your
arms are full of odd packages and
he has that first half dollar and an
other one as we'll
He smacks you Good afternoon, :"
and as you go out you say to your
self, THAT delicatessen man is too
much for me. " OF course he is. He
is too much for anybody when he
knows his business and can put in
the smacks at the right moments
New York Press.