The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1895-04-13
PUNGENI PARAGRAPHS.

Where To Tell It'll tell vou a
tale that is positively hair-raising
-" For Jupiter's sake, tell it to
Gibson-he's bald-headed. Tit Bits.
-Carleton-''How did You enjoy
yourself at Mrs. Hamilton's last night?"
Cynicus-"First-rate; there wasn't a
song or a recitation sprung on us dur
ing the entire evening. Tit Bits.
Mrs. Bacon-'It is terrible down at
your boarding house. You can never
get any hot water" Mr. Bacon-"Only
we have soup, my dear. "-Yonkers
Statesman.
An Interest In Politics. -She-"Are
you interested in politics?" He-"Not
much Only about twenty dollars
worth. dropped it on the last cleo
tion. -Detroit Free Press.
Her Age.-She-"How old would
you say | wasp He-"Um-well, I
should say you were old enough to
known better than think would an
swer question like that"
Quebec has its name from an AL
gonquin word, signifying ''take care of
the rock" There was a dangerous reef
in the river opposite the place where
the city was afterwards built
How shall we serve that new
missionary" asked the chef. ''As hash,
/ guess" said the King of Mbwpka-
He told me that the presbytery had
roasted him just before he left home"
Indianapolis Journal.
AT the Fortune-Teller's THAT is
a very dark future you predict for me,
madam" why, sir, what could you
expect for sixpence? Pay ME a shilling,
and I'll see what can do for YOU
Lie Moniteur Litteraire.
-Checkerly lat the door(-"Are you
really sure that Miss Sweet isn't at
homer" Bridget with honest pride)-
IF yez doubt me word, I'll ask her to
come down, so she can inform yez that
she towld me to say so hersilf!"-Har-
per's Bazaar.
(which do You think is correct"
asked the studious young woman, 81
would rather go home, or had rather
go homer" Neither" replied Cholly
Nairgo. I'D rather stay here. Wash
ipgton Star.
Insurance Agent-"Any poetry in
your family?" Poct-"Why, yes-that
isl" Insurance Agent-'Sorry you
mentioned it. There are some risks the
company won't take. Atlanta Consti-
tuition.
-Mistress-'I don't know what l am
to do, Bridget, unless you get up earlier.
Breakfast is never on the table when
Mr.. Smith is ready for it." Bridget
II don't know, mum, unless you can
prevail upon Mr.. Smith to have his
breakfast an hour later boston
Transcript.
"A certain popular style of hair
dressing was introduced in Washing
ton City at the time when two we'll
known evangelists were holding re-
vival meetings there, which may ex-
plain the following. overheard on
Seventh street car: First Little School
Girl-"What a funny way teacher
wears her hair!' Second Little School
Girl-"Why, don't you know? That's a
Sankey knott
William Henry Harrison was not in
Office long enough to show what kind
of a presidential entertainer he might
have been; yet he was kind hearted to
q remarkable degree and eminently
hospitable. Fond of jest and of fight
ing his battles over again, he was
essentially "a man of the people" The
following incident will ILLUSTRATES: A
plain farmer, calling upon the prcsi-
dent one stormy day, was ushered by
h. mt inf hot
tanned no fire. Gen. Harrison promptly
asked the latter: why did you not
show the visitor into this room. where
it is warm and comfortable" The
servant said something about ''soiling
the carpet" Never mind the carpet"
was the reply, 1.-THE man is one of the
people, and the carpet and house be-
long to the peoDle.-