The citizen. (Frederick City, Md.) 1895-1923, 1895-08-09
CROSSROADS LOGIC.
An OLD LETTER FROM PETROLEUM
" Massey.
Cheap Money Wouldn't Buy More whis-
ky-How Bsseom Would Equalize Mat
ters-The Corners Could stand Diluted
Currency. but Not Weak Liquor.
CONFEDERATE X ROADS

Nlf-i i'ii4- W l'4l requires 4 great tttl Nv
thought, and there Is underlyin prin-
ciples V ich man has gotto understand
afore he i competent to sol hlssef up
ez authority.
One thing | am certain uv-Bascom
amt no finanseer, nor never viii b..
and told HIM So.
"W at i a fiuau,eer:" asked be-
a fuau-eer -ed /, aS-.a4iu the
look e Dan Web,-er SIS man w3ch
kin pay III, debts w!rh u..bn-a man
witch KIN ~ suthin with uaraiu."
1.-THE Corners, then. is full q fnan-
seers lie remarkt bitterly. ca-tiu "a
casual glance ar bis slate 'leh Wuz jisr
full euutt 20 turn over and b.giu % the
t'othcr side
But he hem any wv the science nv
1t. WIZ argaoln with HIM the erher
day in favor uy my Ho-huu ui leather
currency. though Itad him silver wuz
much the same thing and. FIR example,
] would a. 900 that silver WIZ g. ~
the currency uy the fa.hor
Now. don't you ,"-. BaSram that q
] he'd twirt - murn money. / Good
drink twict ~ much whisky and pay
for it,"
How much Is twice nothing" wuz
the unfeelin an>er nv the tvrant who
holds the destines NV the Corners in his
hands THAT " at vaur capitle hez bin
ever seuce l kn0wd YOU
"Parson Sod he, Il don't ~ee W at
earthly difference its goin to MAKE
whether silver is currency or anything
else. How are you a-goin TO git silver IF
1t is made legal tender: IF silver wuz
ez plenty ez bricks, w'at hey you got to
git any nv it with"
"TroO, q W. -" WIZ nv anser.
"but can't 700 see that to hey silver
wood relieve the dettor class: Even
now. afore it is legal tender, til only
with go cents on the dollar, and when
the country Is flooded with it it viii 20
still lower Then we, or rather SIGH ny
Us ez hev property to raise money On,
kin pay off
"Eggsactly So retorts Bascom
'you kin pay me for the good, honist
likker Nv mine witch you hev con
soomed in coin w'ich is less than the
dollar you promised All rite But look
here-come in here all Nv you. | want
you silver men to know exactly W at you
are rushin into.
And this fecnd led Us into the back
roOm-that back room W ich contanes
the subsistence nv the Corners There.
IN long rows, Gwuz Bascom stock.
There. in barrils, piled one on top nv
another, wuz the dehshus whisky nv
louisville, nv different ages. rangin
from that nv two weeks old to that
witch he'd jist left the still and wuz
scarcely cold Wit. There it lay, and ez
my eye ranged affeckshunately over it |
felt ef | Good hey the drinkin NV all
that hkker | wood be content 10 lay
down and die when the last drop wuz
gone,
Bascom p'inted to an immense tank
witch he he'd erected within a few days,
with pipe runnin in from the roof
l shan't raise the price Nv lkker in
conscience ny bein paid for it in a de-
preshiatid currency ~ sed he
fell on Bascoms neck in an extacv
Nv delite, while the others SHOUTED,
"Rah for Bascom :"
sc. " !" | remarkt, while teers suf-
foosed my eyes, Il never placed you
much below the angels, but this gener-
ans act has histid you hundred per
Afnt in my estimashun Bless you, g.
w., bless you
But III tell you W at l she'll do. Do
rou see that tank" sed he.
May ask W at that Is for" l sed.
THAT tank viii fiji with raue water"
a'd he. THE moment you git 70 payin
Ae in silver she'll take out Nv eech Nv
Aem barrils jist eggsactly three and
sbe-fifth goll0ns nv likker and fill it
With water
"Merciful hevingsn we all exclaimed
''Und your Iikker so weak n0w
And when silver gifts down TO rs
cents on the dollar l she'll take out %
pr cent nv whisky and fill her mp with
% per cent Nv water, and SO on down
u silver goes up. she'll add whisky
eEgsactly in proporsheu In short, my
whisky is jist a-goin % foller currency
szsd nothin shorter. You fellers w'ich
work for wagis may SWEET, but won't"
But you Il increase the size nv your
glasses" sed l.
"Nof any But you may drink twice
eu many times 70 git the same amount
nv drunk ez before by payin for eech
drink.
And Bascom stalked hawtily back and
took his posishen behind his bar.
Their wuz consternashun in the Cor
ners sich e. hey never seen. Their wuz
a hurried consultashen at the Deekin's
house, and | sejested that we emanci-
pate ourselves from the d0minyun nv
this tyrant by startin a grosery Nv our
owu on the joint stock principle, W ich
WIS agreed to, each man agreein TO con
trihbit $40 to the capitle stock, witch
wood be enuff 10 buy bar'l or two for
q baeinnin.
W. wuz enthusiastic HI we come TO
ballotin for the man to keep the place,
whW 1t wuz found instid nv my bein
chosen yoonanimusly, ez / eggspected to
be, hat every man he'd votid for hisself.
Ez not soul NV 'em would recede, the
skeen wuz Blocked rite there and finely
he'd 10 be abandoned, and we went back
to Basoom' s and SUBMITTED. That tyrant
hez a
w course we can't stand ikker di-
lootid in that manner We are willin
enuff to diloot the currency with witch
we pay for likker, but we want our lik-
ker full strength. We coodent help it,
but that mite we signed and sent to our