Pawtucket tribune. (Pawtucket, R.I.) 1890-189?, 1895-07-13
boobies LEGACY.


While munching the matutinal meal
Mr.. Bocdlo received letter,
'Listen to this" he cried excitedly
"The Temple, w. G. Dear Sir-We beg to
inform you that our late client, Mr.. Rich
ard McConomy, has bequcathed To you the
sum of fl 900. Be good enough to call at
your earliest convenience. Yours very
truly, Sharpe 81 steele"
Mrs. Doodle oversct her coffee cup In
her excitement. Never before had such
unexpected fortune visited the modest
abode of the Boobies.
"Mr. McConomy dead and left you el,-
OOOr' she cried in an I-can't-bcleve-it
tone. ~ shouldn't have dreamed of such
thing"
"Supposo you should, Mrs Doodle,
"yhat thon?" returned the elated Mr..
Doodle, waving the lcttcr in his wife's
face. "Suppose you'd dreamed he hadn't?
| Take some dreams to unwrite this lceter,
wouldn't itY 1t would take pretty pow
erful dream that could unmake poor old
Dicks will, chg" Here thought struck
him. "By Jovc! Wonder if they'll charge
me six and eightponne for sending mo the
to como out of tho estate.
Mrs. BooGle often told her husband he
was very mean man. Hc was. But
why has he left you ei 0O0s" she persisted.
"Mrs. 1}oodle," returned Mr.. b., with
that lof,iness Of manner which an unex-
pectcd legacy often leads man to assume,
"Mr McConomy is dead. If over meet
him and remember your question, I'll
ask him. If you arc about, III let you
know what he says. just tap the window,
will your Here's my bus"
"You needn't get on your high horse,
Benjamin, If you have had legacy left
you," retorted Mrs. b., moving to the
window.
"Not going to, my dear. l prefer to
sit next the driver" And Mr.. Boodlo
crammed his hat upon his head and rushed
from the room.
An hour later double knock on the
street door disturbed Mrs. Doodle while
building several pretty airy castles on tho
legacy.
IA telegram, ma'am," said Mary Jane.
Mrs Boodls tore open the envelope with
eager, trembling fingers. Married ladies
invariably open telegr9ms with eager,
trembling fingers. Query: Do they expect
news of happy release9 If Mrs. b. cher
ished any such expectation, she was disap-
pointed. The telegram was from Mr.. b.
Legacy all right; left checkbook at
home; duty to pay; get Fred to give open
check a1OO. Clerk will call for it. B. B"
Mrs. Doodle took the telegram to her
husbands brother Fred. He Obliged with
the open check.
Mrs B. returned home to await the
clerk. He came with another double
knock. Apparently lawyers clerk. Sus-
picious, wonder II she'll kick me look
about him-suggestive Of long practice OF
the art Of writ serving. Popular belief
that writ servers get more kicks than half
pence. Can't refute 1t. The clerk departed
with the check, and for this time, without
the kicks
Mrs. Doodle sat down to the piano and
played oh, Dem Golden Slippers" She
was in very jubilant state of mind. She
saw large possibilities in the legacy. She
sent Mary Jane to the news agents for all
the fashion periodicals, read them, and
meditated upon the material Of the first
dress.
Decided upon green velvet trimmed with
gold braid. Bonnet to match. Sent Mary
Jane for patterns, and decided upon the
shade Meditated as to the most effectual
way Of wheedling the necessary cash out OF
Mr.. Doodle. Meditation disturbed by
sound of latchkey in front door. Mr..
Doodle had returned.
Mrs. Doodle prepared to wheedle.
"Oh, Benjamin! was so glad the leg
acy was all right"
Mr.. Doodle glared at the wheedler. He
did not speak. He could not. Something
| too heavy for the present utterance weighed
down his soul.
"Did you find out why Mr.. McConomy
left you the money!" continued the lady.
| Mr.. Doodle uttered q big ID.
"No ma 'am," he yelled, II did not"
| II am not deaf, Mr.. Boodlc, said Mrs.
B. frigidly.
"Then hear this" And Mr. Doodle
shouted at the top of his voice, -"McCono-
my's coming here to dine this evening"
Mrs. Doodle turned very pale. The
green dress trimmed with gold braid and
the bonnet to match faded from her vision.
WHAT she gasped. "Isn'the dead?"
"Deadp' roared Mr.. Doodle. "Do look
a likely subject to invite ghost to din
ner? Is there any medium about me? Dye
see any spiritualist in my eye? The legacy
Is disgraceful hoax, Mrs. Doodle Nc.
Conomy will be here directly, and we're
going to make the perpetrator sit up--sit
up, Mrs. Boodlc."
"But this telegram? Surely this isn't O
hoax
What! Get Fred to give open check
2100. You don't mean TO say-Mrs
Doodle, what does this mcanf"
Fred gave me the check, and gave /,
to the clerk-the man you sent
Mr.. Boobies face turned scarlet hue.
Never before lad he been in such danger
Of apoplexy. He tried to speak. His voca
apparatus hung fire like gun charged
with damppowder.
"Sent!" he yelled at last, the wore
shooting out like the cork Of stout bot
tie. "Scnt When they sent you to thii
sphere they sent stupid, brainless idiot
Mrs. Boodlel mol This telegram isn't 4
hoax. It's a do! A do, tell you!
d-n-d-np'-
Mr.. Doodle concluded his remarks II
the street, whittier he had gone en- rout'
for the nearest telegraph Office. He wirct
= \. 4. - IL.