St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1895-09-27

gone. never saw my little playmate
again"
But what became Of Dan, Grandma"
asked Jessie.
Dan died of old age, and we buried
him on the mountain-side. Those were
the only playmates ever had" said
Grandma, as she arose to put away her
knitting Ella MAYHEM, in the Outlook.
FOR A QUIET MINUTE.
Sammy, "Who is the father his
country"
Jimmie, George Washington"
Sammy, Correct. Who is his
uncle ?"
Jimmie, "Why, l don't know"
Sammy, "Unce Sam [Harpers
Round Table.
Held like a flower in my coat whenI
go. She'll put it in now Life.
Bobby-Mamma, where is dreamland?
Mamma i DONE know, my son. Why
do You ask? Bobby-I dreamed last
night had a bicycle there; want to 90
and get it, Harper's Bazaar.
"You say you cam more money by
your pen than you did year ago" II
do" "Hows that?' stopped writ
ing stories and began addressing enve-
lopes, y Tit-Bits.
Who is the master of this house? ?"
asked the agent OF the man who answer
ed his ring. "Well," was the cautious
response, in a resigned tone, II am the
husband and father."- Life.
Castleton-Is it true that Miss Wiber-
ly referred to me as an agnostic. Club
berly-She said you didn't know any
thing Life.
That a COW can fly seems beyond the
limits OF PROBABILITY, yet the case seems
to be well authenticated of a Jersey Of
light and athletic build which jumped
her fence time and again. After each Of
tense the owner built the fence higher,
until it reached an altitude of twenty
seven feet. At this point he resolved to
to watch all night, and was rewarded by
seeing the animal break off large num-
Der of tree boughs and pile them in
neat heap. Then, running back little
distance, she came on pellmell, turning a
complete somersault before reaching the
heap, and alighting on her back on top
it. The next moment she was bounc-
ed up from the sprln2y boughs like a
jumper from a springboard, and went
over the fence hands down. Its thought
that an occurance like this might have
suggested the story of the COW that
jumped over the moon.
Papa. lack, how did you get that
lump on your forehead ?"
Jack. Bobby hit me with stick"
Papa. did you strike him back?"
Jack. "No."
PAPA. That was quite right"
Jack. Because | hit him first. - Har-
pers Round Table.
Willie (who is travelling alone for the
first time, to conductor). What is the
meaning of W. and r. on the sign
posts along the road? ?"
Conductor. Ring and whistle"
Willie (after pause). 81 can see how
wv stands for wiring, but I'm blessed if
| can see how R can stand for whistle"
Il Harper's Round Table.
The following extracts are made from
examinations papers recently handed in
at public school in Connecticut:
1. From what animals do we get
milk? From the camel and the milkman.
2. The hen is covered with feathers.
With what is the cat covered? The cat
is covered with fleas.
3. Name an animal that has four legs
and long tail? A mosquito.
4. Name two kinds OF nuts. Peanuts
and tor-get-me-nuts,- Harper's Round
Table.
"Papal" said Sammy Snaggs.
"Well?"
philadelphia is usually called the
Quaker city, isn't it? ?"
Yes"
We'll, it was the earthquaker city on
Sunday morning"
The fall term Of Middlebury College
began Sept. -. The freshman class
numbers 33, of whom 81 are men and II