The Stark County Democrat. [volume] (Canton, Ohio) 1833-1912, 1895-04-11
TOTHE SItAGESTRUCK
ADVICE CONTAINED IN THE EXPERT
ENcE OF AN ACTRESS.
Trials and Tribulation of Twenty-four
Hours with One Night Stand Conn
pany-Cheerless Waiting Rooms, Delay
ed Trains and wretched Hotels.

eu ana "reICncu hOtelss
Isn't It odd how many people are stage
struck Moro than half Of my acquaint-
nnccs have voluntarily confessed the soft
impeachment, among their number two
clergymen and snowy haired state sena.
tor. No doubt their imaginations picture
(mine did) joyous vision of triumphs in
which wealth, fame, laurel wreaths, etc.,
are jumbled in artistic and cloudy confu-
sion The reality is different. Looking
backward-I won't say how long--I see
only a never ending perspective of railway
coaches, sleeping cars and ono night
stands.
Picture to yourself the bare walls, tho
hard benches Of the little railway station,
tho solitary kerosene lamp, that smells to
heaven, hung at tho far end just by the
ticket office, the sheet iron stove in the
center of tho room-redhot IL tho weather
is warm, stone cold If Blizzard is in prog
ress without-the close sitting atmosphere
of tho place, the Jays" as the comedian
dubs them, lounging around chewing to-
bacco to the last man, expectoratlng at,
on and around the ouspidor as though it
was some new kind Of target, but never,
oh, never making q bullseye.
You enter this charming place to await
tho train which carries you to tho next
one night stand. You have rushed from
the theater after packing your trunk In
jify, locked 1t three separate times, only
to find an important article of your ward.
robe left out each time, your face covered
with q thick veil TO hide the makeup you
have not time TO remove, for tho stage
manager has notified the company, one
and all, that the train leaves at 1915 p.
m. As the curtain falls at q quarter to
II, you have just 30 minutes to change
your costume, pack your trunk and get to
the station.
OF course you hurry for all you are
worth--it is 200 miles to the next town,
and II you get left you pay your own fare.
long wait, VIII that train never
conner Tho click, click Of tho telegraph
Is heard in the ticket office, and shortly
after our agent announces in tones the re-
verse of cheerful:
"Our train is two hours late, and we
shall most likely miss connections at the
next junction"
In due time-630--we arrive at the
junction, only to find our train gone and
over five hours to wait till the next one
arrives. We interview the station master
hotel in the town-the PiCkwick House.
The town is mile or moro from the
depot. The gentlemen Of the company an
nounce their intention Of walking, but
the "old man" declared he preferred to
die whore he was After a struggle o
covered wagon with seats was procured,
and the ladies, accompanied by the afore-
said o. M, who consented to live little
longer iolted merrily away
To say we were tired and hungry but
feebly expresses our condition. However,
the prospect of breakfast and bed for a
few hours inclined us all to treat the
affair as joke.
Mine host Of the Pickwick, who met us
at the door, bowling, smiling and rubbing
his hands, ushered us into tho office,
where the omnipresent sheet iron stove
fourished. A few wooden chairs, q small
desk and very large ouspidor completed
tho furniture. Across one end of the room
was PARTITION about seven feet blgh,
from behind which came q suspicious
clattor Of dishes. We looked at each other
IN dismay. What had we struck
just then the agent came forward. LA
dies, I'm very sorry, but you'll have to
double up. There arc only two rooms
available, The gentlemen will have to
sleep in the chairs"
This was the last drop in my cup Of bit
terness. knew the leading lady would
chum with the soubrette and the "old
woman" fall to my share-and she snored.
well, show us the rooms. Let us rake
tho cinders from our hair and remove
some of the railroad SCOT from our faces
that at least would be something" we
said.
The landlord turned his whole battery
Of bows and smiles upon us. "Wouldn't
We take breakfast first? 1t was ready,
and"--
"No, we would not" we unanimously
informed him. Wash up first wo must
and would, breakfast or no breakfast.
"Show us the rooms at once"
"Impossiblel They were not made up
yet. II we would breakfast
"No, no"-this from the old woman,
who did all the talking. "Show us the
rooms and send the chambermaid at
once"
Again mpossible'-moro bows and
smiles. "Help was scarce and hard to keep,
and-well, to tell the truth, the chamber
maid was also waitress and could not
leave the dining room till breakfast was
over"
In desperation take hand. "Then
We'll do up the rooms ourselves, only, for
goodness sake, let's get to them"
This time no bows or smiles, instead
dogged look of determination. The
landlord was in his last ditch. Ho was
sorry not to oblige the ladies, but the
guests who were at present occupying the
rooms were not up yet.
The dining room was behind the parti-
ton, and the odor of stale tobacco foated
over it and mingled with the menu, which
consisted OF tough steak, eggs that any
self respecting hen would unhesitatingly
disown, very queer bread that some one
said was adulterated with bone dust, cot
tonseed butter and coffee that tho come.
dian declared was of the bootleg Varie-
ty," whatever that may be.
After this repast we cooled our heels in
the office until the ohambermaid conde-
scended to let us go to our rooms-cham-
bers of horror as they proved. We were
called at half past IL and rode back to tho
station in the ark on wheels, This time
we got the train and arrived at our next one
night stand just in time to get supper and
rush TO the theater, go through tho per-
formance and leave town after it again.
This Is the record Of "a hours on the
road. Do you wonder that ono night
stands are bugbear to theatrical folkP-
Now York Herald.
What Women Never Do.
A young woman who has done stenog-
rapher's work In several down town offices