Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1895-01-30
PITH AND POINT.

Even a lean person may 1all Plu1nl I
into the water.-Lowell Courier.
Can a hungry man make square
meal off of round stake?-Lowel
Courier.
The baker who mixes his dough
properly has soft thing of it.-Buf'
falo Courier.
The fellow who was married in the
Ferris wheel ought to make a good all
round husband.-Plain Dealer.
The pup was so good natured
That the tramps all turned him down
80 they put a muzzle on him,
And he terrified the town.
ssYes, Minerva, there is difference
between getting an option on apart
ments and getting flat refusal. -
Elmira Gazette.
The political worker is willing tt
turn in when wanted and to turn out
at times, but his adherence is q turr
down.-Philadelphia Ledger.
She-'1t is rank injustice to say
that a woman is inferior to a man il
reasoning powers" He-"Why?" She
-''Because. Detroit Tribune.
In the cleaning, o my darling,
As the deep ming shades advance,
I will meet you tie the dog up
So he cannot gnaw my pants.
kansas City Journal.
In Lapland the style in feminine al
tire has not changed in 1000 years
What delightful place that must be
for married men Hartford Journal
He had an iron will they said
That never could be trusted.
Put, like all iron, since he wed
His will seems to have rusted.
indianapolis Journal.
'I hear you are going to be mar
ried?" ''That is news to me-" ''Some-
one surely told me you were engaged. u
'sThat' different. ."--Pittsburg Chroni.
Gle.
81 insist upon your leaving the
house," she said angrily. "Certa.i~
ly," he replied blandly; 'I have Il
intention of taking it with me. Free
Press.
Tommy-"Paw, what makes the
stars SO bright?" Mr.. Figg-"Oh.
these astronomers are securing the
heavens all the time. ."-Indianapolis
Journal.
MARY had a little lamb"
They ng-~The youth denied.
''She had," he said, "a salad
And a dozen oysters, fried"
Detroit Tribune.
''They say he simply electrified his
hearers at the debate the other night. u
"Why shouldn't he? He took the
negative and was very positive. -
Buffalo Courier.
If revolutions never end in South
America it should be remembered they
come round regularly, and that things
that are round naturally have no end.
Philadelphia Times.
"You say that my work is easy com.
pared with yours" said the hand-or-
gan man to his monkey attachment,
''but tell you it is an everlasting
grind. "-Rochester Democrat.
Police Sergeant-'What have You
run this man in for? Did you find
anything crooked about him?" Of
ficer McGobb-'I did sor; It was q
corkscrew. w."-Indianapolis Journal.
A conscienceless murderer has de
frauded the legal profession by COM
mitting suicide. He has lost the
chance of an appeal after conviction,
and they have lost their fees.-Hallo
He knelt at her feet in silence,
But no tender speech did he study;
She looked fair and sweet,
But 1t wasn't treat
To put on her Overshoes muddy.
Chicago Inter-Oceah-
"How long," says a contemporary,
''can one live without air?' It de-
pends on the air. Most people could
live long time without some of the
airs which have been popular the past
twelve months. Buffalo Quips.
Gertie Gushier--.'I don't see how
you can bring yourself to marry him.
His small statue makes him absolutely
insignificant. Sarah Shrewdly--
eyes; but there is nothing of that
sort the matter with his income. -
Buffalo News.
Intended as Compliment-Mis:
Elderly (coquettishly)-''The material
is very good, but the colors are too
gay for q person of my age" Well.
meaning Clerk-"Oh. I'm sure you
are not half as old as you look. D
Texas Siftings.
Tn Janan II Ia cops;dorod rrd;rr;Sor