The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-12-05

It's 10 p. m.," the maid exclaimed.
But useless did it prove
lie didn't seem TO understand
That p. m. means please move"
Truth.
Why. professor. you have two UNI.
brellas."
That's all right. expect to lose ono
or them.'-Fligcnde Blaetter.
VIII somebody please tell lis why
our lawmakers are never arrested for
passing worthless ills?--Boston Tran.
script.
Wasn't the bride delightfully."- tim.
id!' Very. She was even shy ten
years when it came to giving her age"
Indianapolis Journal.
Shelf | had my live to live over
again. IIe-I thought that's what
You were doing; you said you were %
-fonkers Statesman.
\ mine is like a womnn's dress;
OFT when you hunt around.
1t takes a year or two before
The pocket can be found.
New York Herald.
by Jove, I left my pockctbook under
my pillow" oh. we'll. your servan is
honest. isn't she?' That's lust it
she'll take it right up to my wife,
Chicago Record.
Skinnum- Remember. IL anybody
calls am III to nobody. Servant tsottO
voice)-Well. this Is the first time I
over saw you when you weren't into
Observation-Disclosures Record.
Marriage. we own. is a lottery.
Yet here Il great difference lies;
There arc times when we do not envy
The man with the capital prize.
Judge.
Henry" said Mrs. Peck. Il am going
10 get n bicycle" Dear me-" said Mr..
Peek. mildly. isn't n man enough
for you to II ovcr:"-Indianapolis
Journal.
Young Wife cat the fancy balr-
You're improving wonderfully as a
dancer. Don't you remember how you
used 10 tear my dresses? Young hus-
band-Y-c-s; wasn't buying 'eln then.
--Roston Globe.
Papa (cnraged Why. Constan,ia.
daughter. I've never. in all my life. seen
ms soft. green, unsOphisticated. spoony
an idiot as young Puddington--M Nam
ma (emphatically)-I have.-Cleveland
P~laip1ealer.
Il can see no reason" said the s. 7. r.
A. boarder, why it should be thought
advisable to dock u horses tail" Prob
ably suggested the Cheerful Idiot.
they are docked for being behind
Indianapolis Journal.
I'm sorry now. mamma" sObbed
Bobby. that I stole those apples"
oh, yes said his mother. your rom
science hurts you. does it?" No" re-
turned Bobby. its my stomach that
hurts."-New York Herald.
Miss Antique--People are always
talking of sclf-made men. | wonder
why they never speak of n self-made
woman? Miss .Austere - Because 4
self-made woman generally doesn't like
to have it known.-IIarper's Bazaar.
When he asked for her hand she re-
piled, mo, George; my heart is quite
at your service; but | think l had bet
ter keep my hand myself. 1t might be
useful to me in case you couldn't sup
port me, you knOw."-BoSton Tran.
script.
Daughter-This piano is really my
very own, isn't it, pa? Pa-Yes. my
dear. "And when i marry l can take
it with me. can ~ Certainly, my
child; but. don't tell any one. 1t might
spoil your chanccs."-New York Week
ly.
Father-You may as well give up
thinking about that young man, Dash
ing. He does not love you. Daughter
How do you know, papa? Father-I
met him at the club just now, and he
refused to lend me a flver.-Boston
Globe.
He-I come here so frequently that
I'm beginning to think that you look
uDon me as a sort of c~hestnut-a roast
ed chestnut. rs it were. She-NO, not
a roasted chestnut. When a chestnut
is roasted it pops.-Cleveland Plain
Dealer.
Il wonder said the man who was
about TO start TO Atlanta, "if I'd bet
ter take Il heavy OvercOat along"
you will not need it, replied the man
II, ,.,I lo,,, ,J,,,n ssbu, ,.n,,'l hat4nu
take a heavy pocketbook."-ChicagO
Tribune.
IIousekcepcr-You don't look as II
you had washed yourself for Il month.
Tramp-please, mum, tn doctors say
tn proper time to Gathc is two hours
aiter a meal. and ! haven't had any
thing Won cal Il NNNll N SIX MppkS-