davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
HINTS TO BRlDEGROoMS.
No Reason Why He Should Appear inSuch
Poor Light.

No Reason Why He Should Appear inSuch
Poor Light.
There is modern definition of
bridegroom which is little cruel GER
tainly, but which pretty well describes
the position of that parsonage. A
bridegroom is said to be thing in
black coat who attends weddings. And
it is quite true that in point of impor-
lance he, ranks very low down indeed
in the eyes of the spectator. Yet there
is not the slightest reason really why
he should appear in such a very poor
light as he too often does.
He need not, for instance, come into
church or the room as if he were being
led to execution. He need not hang
his head as il caught in the commits
sion of crime, or blunder about with
an awkwardness which makes every
girl present feel thankful she is not in
the brides shoes.
No doubt his position is painful and
trying. He feels he is the target for
all eyes, when, in fact, he is nothing
of the kind. Let him start by con-
vincing himself that no one is likely to
waste glance on him when there are
the bride and bridesmaids to be looked
at, and he will find 1T easier to pre-
serve his self-possession. He must try
to look happy, no matter how he feels.
Can worse compliment be paid to
the girl he has induced to marry him
than looking as if he had regretted his
folly? He must try to look manly, not
only for her sake, but his own, for she
is very likely to regret her decision at
the last moment when she sees how it
seems to affect him. He should look
proud. a a.ygs IA ##
Surely it ought to be the proudest
moment of his life; he should be elated.
and not ashamed. He should be in
good spirits, yet not carried away by
them.
A jocular bridegroom is a thing one
has only to see once to remember with
horror for the rest of ones days. --Tit-
Bits.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
PIONEERING SHRUBS.
But Very Few varieties Want Any Pr

But Very Few Varieties Want Amy Prun.
ing In Winter.
During the winter season a very great
deal of damage is done to shrubs by
many who profess to understand how
to prune properly and yet are entire
~ ignorant of the whole business. This
is deplorably evident near all large
cities, where there are many men who
call themselves gardeners, and who
turn many penny by the work of
pruning they get in the many small
gardens therein. Many of these men
are entirely honest, but ignorant. Not
only are they ignorant to-day, but they
continue so from day to day. never
profiting from experience. Others
know better, but as the pruning means
work they slash away at the trees and
shrubs, caring nothing whether the
owners get flowers from their shrubs or
beautiful shapes from their trees.
1t would be q great surprise to the
honest primer to be told that, with
hardly an exception, shrubs want no
pruning at all in winter, yet it is true.
Excepting not more than a half dozen
sorts, shrubs flower from wood of the
previous season, and when the last sum-
mer's growth is Topped away the prom
Use OF flowers entirely disappears. lido
not say never prune, for there is some
times little thinning out to do, and
sometimes long, struggling shoot
wants shortening in, to give a bush a
good outline, and this work 1 do. The
well-known golden bell Qforsythie
viridissina) will serve as an illustra-
ton. Left to itself, it is not a hand
some bush. 1t makes very long shoots,
especially when the plants are vgor
Gus. have such one in my garden,
and but lately | cut off the tops of some
of the longest shoots, which had shot
far ahead of the others. The length
| cut off each was not more than two feet,
and there is left four feet to each one,
and, besides this, there are couple of
dozen other young shoots not topped at
all, so that | have yet an abundance OF
young wood to give me bloom. 1t has
grieved and provoked me many time
to see a collection of shrubs in some
garden the young shoots of which had
been entirely cut away, and in MANY
cases the owner would have been
thought to have been possessed of
enough intelligence to have prevented
the mutilation of his shrubs. If you
employ man to prune your shrubs and
he proceeds to cut away the wood of
last season, clear him out, for he GER
tainly is imposing on you as to hiS
knowledge. W.
The proper season to prune shrubs is
in spring or summer, as soon as the
| towering is over. Cut them back then,
if they are not shapely, or if there is too
much old wood. But do not think prun-
ing has to be an annual job. have such
shrubs as weigelas, SNOWFALL, deutz;a
and the like, which may be said never
to have been pruned. A little finger
and thumb nipping of the ends of some
| of the growing shoots in midsummer
has been all sufficient for them.-Prac-
| tical Farmer.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
A New Dodge.

81 beg your pardon, lady" said Trav-
cling Tommy, as he stopped at the
back door, but if you just smile I'll
take yer picture with this here cam
era. / am travelling on foot, making
a collection of photos of our beautiful
American women. Thanks, have it. I"
Then the good woman offered him a
generous hand-me-out, which he ac-
copied with the grace of a true knight
of the road. "You see," he explained
to Willie Allthewhile, sit didn't take
no work at all to paint that cigar box
black and cut a round hole in the end,
but it fetches 'em every time. They
think it's photographer, and their
picter goes in the collection. Make
one and cultivate your manners, and
yer can live like a prince. "-Philadel-
phia Call.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
A .Hoe-PowER MINE.
An Ingenious Man who Utirized HIS Swine
Thus.

An Ingenious Man Who utilized His Swine
Thus.
II was riding through the mountains
In Trinity county few days ago."
said a prominent mining man the
other day, ''when i happened to take
trail that led by old 'Burlap' John
sons cabin. You know he has al
ways been called "Burlap" John
son because he was never known to
wear a pair of boots, but always kept
his feet sewed up in burlaps like cam
vas-packed hams. took dinner
cold corn bread and bacon-with him,
and then sat down for smoke;
Wouldn't you jest as soon do your
smolSin' outside, podner?' he asked.
Certainly said /, but on don't
object to the smoke of cigar, do you?'
was naturally surprised, for he was
already putting away at an old corn
cob pipe.
mo, course not, SEEM as I've
smoked nigh on TO fifty years; but
want to keep my hogs to work
my curiosity was aroused, but said
nothing He took down a double bar
relied, Misunderstanding shotgun and his
powder morn. men he went out TO n
shed and got a pan of sheled corn. He
sat down on bench at the cabin door,
rammed down couple of charges of
powder aud poured a handful of corn
in each barrel. He put on percussion
cap, pressed it down with the hammer.
cooked both barrels, and blazed away
at the side hill across the little gulch.
The roar had not died away till
drove of hogs came running, grunt-
ing and squealing and commenced to
root the side hill for the corn. When
ever they Stacked up in their work the
old man fired another charge of corn.
That's mean trick, said /. why
don't you feed it to them in troughY
Feed it to 'em?' he repeated in
amazement. Then they wouldn't work.
Besides, they don't need it.
What do you want to make them
work for, and why do you waste corn
on them if they don't need it?'
Why, man alive! They do as much
work as four men would. They root
MP the dirt, an when the rain comes all
have to do is to sluice it,
Then understood that he was us
ing the hogs to help him mine. San
Francisco Post.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
THE FARMING WORLD.
AN EXCELLENT TESTER.

Directions Here Given Explain How One
Can BE Made at Home. ~
The universal favor with which the
Babcock tester is regarded by progress
awe dairymen almost makes it's intro
duction an absolute necessity in every
well regulated dairy. The seemingly
low price of dairy products, with the
prospect of high-priced rations, would
Indicate greater reason for every farm
er who has herd of cows to know just
what each individual animal is doing
for him in return for the feed fed to
them. Even when feed is plenty and
low in price, it is not within the bounds
of economy to shif1essly feed a cow
that has poor assimilative powers and
fails under the light of figures to give
q net profit to her owner, to continue to
keep her and still reduce the profit of
another that gave milk of high testing
value.
Many dairymen have provided them
selves with tester and are acting in
this regard wisely, but very large ma
jority have either carelessly neglected
to supply the need or do not care to go
to the expense of purchasing one for
their few cows.
The present crop conditions inOhio
will demand that many of us must cut
down our stock or purchase feed at
outrageous prices, hence the necessity
of the elimination of those animals
which arc the poorest producers at the
pail and churn and the keeping of those
which will come nearest making prof
liable attachment to the farm or will
prove a source of revenue regardless of
high-priced feed. s#
For the purpose of encouraging the
introduction of the tester will give an
illustration with description of a cheap,
reliable one, that can be made and oper-
ated at very low cost and give just as
good results as those purchased Of
creamery supply companies. N
The agricultural. press has given so
much upon the manner of use and man.
ipulation of the tester that little upon
that point will be necessary at this time
further than to say that the greatest
care and exactness must be brought
into play from the beginning to the
chose of each test, otherwise no good
can possibly accure from it's use.
In the first place, an old sewing ma
chine that can be bought very cheap, or
donated, must be secured. One that
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

has large fly wheel on which band
runs the pulley for propelling the
works of the machine will necessarily
be the best,and the larger the fly wheel
and the smaller the pulley the better.
Usually most machines have shaft
about or 10 inches to which this pulley
about s or 10 inches to which this pulley
is attached at one end and crank
wheel at the needle end. This shaft
and it's equipments can be removed
from the arm and used for the shaft on
which the arms for the buckets and bot
ties are to be attached.
A table or stand of some kind must be
provided as foundation upon which to
construct the machine. Often the
stand of the old sewing machine will
answer quite well by screwing on Il
piece of Pinch plank under the top,
about feet in length, extending out on
one side sufficient length to attach the
lines in cut. Any old table that is 31s
feet long makes frSt-rate pedestal.
The arms are made from 1R-inch
galvanized strap iron, foot long, and
riveted to the crank plate on the shaft
with two holes at c, drilled in each end,
on which the buckets are hung from
wire hooks soldered into the buckets.
The latter are 2 inches in height and Ia
inches in diameter. s,esra--
Sometimes the bearings of the shaft
can be utilized in hanging it in an up
right position, plumbed and made to
run true. The pulley wheel is located
at the table where the shaft passes
through, allowing the shaft to extend
nearly inches above the stand and suf-
ficient distance below to get steady
motion, either in iron or wooden bear
ings. ,
From the shaft center measure out
&c inches on che four sides, inscribe
lines and take quarter round and form
ledge at thu line with fiat side out.
Then construct n box out of some light
1h-tnch material, 10 inches high, so that
it Will drop over the outside of tie
quarter round. Cut out holes at b Il for
band. This top or box is necessity,
to protect tho operator, as the breaking
of bottle with acid in it strikes TIN.
face. We warn not to leave off this
cover under any circumstances while re.
yolving the machine.
TIE drive or fiy-wheel should be
arranged so it can be moved away from
ahe small pulley, thus tightening up
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Choice Farm Lands of tho world-Per-
feet Climate.

October 22nd the Big Four Route In con-
nection with the Chesapeake and Ohio Ry.
will sell round trip excursion tickets TO all
points in Virginia Except east OF Gordons-
vile on Washington Division) and North
Carolina ut one fare with two dollars added.
Tickets will be limited thirty days. return
ing and good for stopover in Virginia In
Virginia they have no droughts, no bliz-
yards, cheap lands and the best markets in
the world. Send for free descriptive
pamphlet, rates, etc. y. L. TRUITT, N. W.
p. A, 234 Clark St., Chicago.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
what the Bicycle Wnl no.

The work of the farmers alliances
leagues and clubs may materializs into
the good country roads they are so Wig
orously working for; but in the mean
time the bicycle has and will master
better than any other vehicle known
the rough highways all about u.s.
Sarah c. June, Albion, N Y.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Tho Arithmetic or 1t.

Mr.. Grumps-I don't see how it il
those Norman women could be con-
tented with only half husband.
Mrs. Grumps-A woman with half a
husband has only half as much trouble
rs woman with a whole husband.
That's why.--,N. Y. Weekly.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Atlanta and tho south.

The Chicago and Eastern Illinois r. r. will
during the timeof the Exposition at Atlanta
Sept. Is, to Dec. 81, 1895, offer exceptionally
fine service between Chicago and the South.
A low rate ticket will be sold, and through
cars run to all southern points. This is 55
miles the shortest route to Atlanta, Chatta-
nooga and the South.
For guide TO Atlanta and the Exposition
address c. W. Humphrey, Northwestern
Passenger Agent, St Paul, Mimi, or City
Ticket Office, 800 Clark St., Chicago. Charles
l.. Stone, General Passenger Agent, Chicago.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Wanted n Rest.

First Tired Auditor (at long-drawn
out revival fmeeting)-Where are You
going?' ~
Second Tired Auditor-Up to the
mournersi bench. m
"Eh? What for?' h
81 see it has cushion on it; this one
hasn't" IN. Y. Weekly.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Choosing a Book.

$50 she rejected Herbert and chose
Will" " FkEHHEB sri
eyes. They both did their best ia
please her. She has literary tastes,
you know, and Herbert sent her a
carbohydrates volume of poems.
THAT should vhave made good inn
preston"
at did. But VIII showed her his
carefully-edited bank book. Wash
ington Star. ~
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
SECURE FARM BRIDGE.

and very secure bridge where a single
log cannot be used as stringer. Rails
can be added along either side for
greater security to the top.-Orange
Judd Farmer.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
SECURE FARM BRIDGE.

An Easy Thing to Build II One Knows
How to Do 1t.
Haphazard construction of farm
bridges is risky matter, the safety
of valuable animals being often thus
put in jeopardy. The accompanying
Illustration shows an easily constructed
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

NEVER listen to calumnies, because, II
they are untrue, l run tho risk of being dc
ceived; and, if they are true, OF hating per-
quieu. i"'
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Reside n Little Casket.

Marguerite, Aged One Summer Day,
o azure eyes, that never looked on sorrowi
Oquiet brow, that hid no anguished paint
o peaceful heart that dreaded no tomorrow
o sinless lips. that need confess no stainI
o tiny hands, that never held q burden
waxen feet, that never missed the wayi
o happy child, to win the dearest guerdon,
Knowing of life but one sweet summer day
-Emma Dowd, In Youths Companion
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

WE enjoy ourselves only in our work--iu
our doing; and our best doing is our best
enjoyment.-Jacobi.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
KNOWLEDGE

Brings comfort and improvement and
tends to personal enjoyment when
rightly used. The many, who live bet
ter than others and enjoy life more, with
less expenditure, by more promptly
adapting the worlds best products to
the needs of physical being, will attest
the value to health of the pure liquid
laxative principles embraced in the
remedy, Syrup of Figs.
Its excellence is due to its presenting
In the form most acceptable and pleas
ant to the taste, the refreshing and truly
beneficial properties of perfect laE
alive; effectually cleansing the system,
dispelling colds, headaches and fevers
and permanently curing constipation.
1t has given satisfaction to millions and
met with the approval of the medical
profession, because it acts on the Kid
neys, Liver and Bowels without weak
ening them and it is perfectly free from
every Objectionable substance.
Syrup of Figs is for sale by all drug
gists in SOC and 81 bottles, but it is man
ufactured by the California Fig Syrup
Co. only, whose name is printed on every
package, also the name, Syrup of Figs,
and being well informed, you will not
accept any substitute if offered.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

LET's take the instant by the forward top /;
for we are old, and on our quickest DEGREES
the inaudible and noiseless foot OF time
steals ere we can effect them.-Shake-
Spearc.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

AN old member of the London stock ex.
change says: "The only time man OF ex.
perience takes his wife into his confidence
Ii to tell her he is not making any money"
Household Words.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
gerrn=life

The doctors tell u.s. nowadays, that disease germs
are everywhere; in the air, in the water in food
Clothes money; that they get into our bodies live
there thrive and grow they find anything thrive
Consumption is the destruction Of lung tissue by
germs where the lung is too weak to conquer them.
The remedy is strength-vital force.
SCOTS Emulsion, with hypophosphites, means the
adjustment Of lung strength to overcome germ
1t is fighting the germ with the odds in our favor.
These tiny little drops Of fat food make their way
into the system and refresh and re-invigorate it.
Whether you succeed with it not depends on how
good start the germs had and how carefully you
live. The shortest way to health is the patient
The gain is often slow.
70 cent. and sioo SCOTT & BOVINE, Chemists New York
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

THERE is this difference between happi-
ness and wisdom, that he who thinks him
self the happiest man, really Is SO; but he
that thinks himself the wisest is generally
the greatest fool. Cotton.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Kata Flsld IN n.nx.r.

DENVER, Sept 1o.-My journey from
~ Quincy Railroad, one Of the best man
aged systems In the country, should says
judging by the civility Of the employees, the
comfort experienced, the excellence OF u,
roadbed, and the punctuality OF arrival. I
actually reached Denver ahead of time. The
Burlington Route Is also the best to ST.
Paul, Minneapolis, Omaha and Kansas City.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

FORESIGHT -'Arry-"Let's take baout.
Chorley." Chorley-"Not mel Not just
after dinner costin' me two shillin's."-
Fun.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

BEEcHAM's PILLS for constipation 100 and
25c. Get the book (free) atyour druggisps
and 60 by 1t. Annual sales 6,0O0, 600 boxea.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

LIE is q great simpleton who imagine3
that the chief power of wealth is to supply
wants. In ninety-nine cases out of hun
dred it creates more wants than it supplies.
Anon
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

JEss-''They say Heaven lies about us in
cur infancy" Jack-''Possibly; anyway,
the world does when we grow up."-N. "
Herald
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

"PAw,' inquired Tommy Tucker, "when
it was young did they call it Boyhattan
Islands Chicago Tribune.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

SKIPPED.-"Whcrc is your French cook,
Mrs. Toneall" ''She has taken French
leave. n-Detroit Free Press.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Like n Yenomous sernont

Hidden in the grass, malaria but waits our
approach, to spring at and fasten its fangs
upon u.s. There is, however, certain anti
dote to its venom which renders II powerless
Tor evil. Hostetter's Stomach Bitters is this
acknowledged aud world-famed specific, and
1t Is, besides this, n thorough curative for
rheumatism, dyspepsia, liver complaint, con-
stipation, Ia grippe and nervousness. In con-
valescence and ago IL is very serviceable.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

NATURAL SEoUENCE.-"I see she was mar.
ried in bloomer suit. What next?' "a
divorce suit, probably" " Detroit Free
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

THE quarter of an hour before dinner is
the worst suitors can choose,-Zimmer-
man.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
Mcvioker's Theater, Chicago.

Denman Thompsous beautiful play, "The
Old Homestead, !" begins October Goth. Like
good wine, time seems to improve its quail
ity.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

A practical joker is one for whom no
one has any practical use.-Young Mems
Era
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

HE-"I'd kiss you If / dared" She
"What! you don't think I'd strike man, do
youln-Albany Freeman.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

We have not been without Piso's Cure fos
Consumption for 30 years. --IizzIE FERRxI-
Camp St., Harrisburg, Pa, May 4, '94.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

HE-"Will you be mine-mine until death
rs do parti" Shot don't know about
that; you look as If you might live a good
many years. "-Indianapolis Journal.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

MEN are never so easily deceived as while
they are ondeavoring TO deceive others
Rochefoucauld
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24
The Schiller. Chicago.

Following the run Of "The Sphinx" wn.
liam Jerome and fine company In the
farce-comedy, Clown Topics, Twill be the
attraction,
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

A BEGGAR's rags may cover as much pride
as an alderman's gown.-Spurgeon.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

THERE is nothing that man can less af-
ford to leave at homo than his conscience
or his good habits.-Packe.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-10-24

Halls Catarrh Cure
Is taken internally. Price 75c.