The San Francisco call., 1895-12-22
CROWLEY IN SAN LORENZO
Native Son Talent Arranges an
Original Farce for New
Years Eve.
OUTLAWRY AS A FINE ART.
The Cheerful Bandit Sends New Years
Greetings From Place of
Safety.
OAKLAND OFFICE SAN FRANCISCO GALL,
4O8 RroadWaY Dec. u.

9OS Broadway, Dec q. {
The Native Sons of San Lorenzo have
caught the minstrel fever and on New
Years eve they will make their debut al
the village hall. The great attraction o1
the entertainment will be the closing farce
"Phil Crowley, the Haywards Bandit, and
How We Failed to Catch Him"
The farce has been specially prepared
and is full of local hits in which Sheriff
White and his three sons, who are CHIEF
deputies in his office, figure very prom
inently.
The curtairi rises on Phil Crowley sitting
in his cabin, near Haywards. From his
speech it is learned that he anticipates
danger and he fills his wallet with gold and
notes ready for flight. The cabin is sup
piled with railroad timetables and maps
of the different routes across the continent.
Maps are on the wall showing the differ
ent steamship routes to Australia and
japan and hotel guides are numerous.
Il love these Haywards hills" says
Crowley, land greatly do | desire to stay.
But l must away. Although as white a
man as ever cut throat or lodged an
Alameda constable am in danger. have
a premonition that my presence is not de-
wants me is the Sheriff, and his hotel is
not on my list. He is gentleman, very
white man, but his clothes might get
soiIed if we became acquainted; so am
going. | have looked over many routes.
| have considered various scenic and sun
set routes, but nothing seems to agree
with my present conditions so well as the
moonlight route. So, my scenic Hay
! wards, my stock of stolen property, good
by, a thousand times good"
An army of constables then rush into
the cabin just after Crowley steps out
The bandit listens to their conversation
and hears them ransack his hut, and then
conceals himself behind a tree and shoots
one of the constables, saying as he does so,
That's for an example.
The Deputy Sheriff, constable and
posses from two counties then crowd close
together for safety and there is a big strug-
gle for center, during which few pistols
go off and the army declares that they had
better retire to the hut and refresh them
selves after their labors.
The posses and Sheriffs enter in earnest
on the man-hunt. The orders are to take
him alive or dead, and they disperse in
different directions. Eventually footprints
are discovered, and the word is passed
along that in few hours the Sheriff will
have possession of Crowley. The footprints
become palmer and eventually lead to a
hut-a bandits hut-and the order is given
to surround it.
Fall in, my noble fellows" says the
Sheriff, to-day shall mark an epoch in our
administration. But first let US call the
roll. Are all the deputies present? Answer
to your Names"
"a. Block?" Here
.B. Block?' Here"
&C. Block?" Here"
sd. Block ?" Here"
"Now surround the bandit"
A rush is m ade and fifty guns are
pointed at the hut. face appears at the
window and there is CONSERVATION. In
stantly the guns are lowered and
frightened Chinaman, civilized enough to
throw up his hands, rushes out of the hut.
yelling: "Wha' TO- yo' want me2 l come!
! comei"
During the excitement messenger-boy
rushes onto the Stage and hands the
Sheriff message. That official reads it
and says: Boys, we're safe, we're safe.
We've won bloodless victory"
They all demand to know the contents
of the message, and so he reads it. 1t is
this:
CHICAGO. New Years Eve.
A happy New Year to all the jolly Sheriffs of
Alameda and Contra Costa counties Am
sorry cannot be with you and apologize for
having caused you so much trouble. In haste,
as am billed to deliver watchnieht address
al the Methodist church. Cordially,
PHIL CROWLEY
Then the curtain falls. Alec Rosborough,
ex-Tax Collector, is one of the moving
spirit in the show. and there is no doubt
it will be a big success. 1t will be held at
the village hall.