Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1895-08-01
spri.kies Of spice.

.S@~~-~8
froth, at half-a-dima glass.
boston Courier
Isn't Smith a poet?" mo; can't
borrow a quarter to have his hair cut
that's all!'-Atlanta Constitution.
First girl-"Cholly isn't such a fool
as he looks" Second gir1-"No, indeed.
ne couldn't be."-Washington Star.
Jack-"To feather your nest you must
have money" Tom-"Yes, there ID
nothing so delightful as cash down.
Truth.
"She-"Have you ever loved an
other?" He-"Yes, Of course. Did you
think I'd practice on a nice girl like
ouT-Life.
81 hate these bicycles built for two"
said Miss Jemmison. 1T encourages
people to talk behind your back
harper's Bazaar.
Little girl-"what is tact, papa?"
Papa-"Something every woman has
and exercises-until she gets married"
New York Weekly.
Tommy-"Paw, what is the board of
education?" Mr.. Figg-"In the days
when l went to school it was 4 pine
single. Indianapolis Journal.
He's this the first time you've
ever been In love, darlingT She
(thoughtlessly)-"Yes; but it's 80 nice
that hope it won't be the last.-Tit-
Bits.
Blow, blow, blow,
Wind Of the summer sea;
But you can never blow as much
AS 1t takes to board by thee.
Augusta, Ca, Chronicle.
"Guy, do be quiet" said mamma'
you are SO noisy" "I'm Obliged 10
make a noise. mamma; somebody
might take me for a girl."-Phlladel-
phia Times.
Clara Wintcrbloom-"There Is only
enough 20 about half fill this trunk.
What shall do, fill it with papers?'
Mrs. Winterbloom-"No; let your father
pack t."-Brooklyn Life.
Caller-Your coat-of-arms is very
pretty; but couldn't any one else use
1t? American Hostess-No, indeed. We
paid the designer $40 extra to have II
copyrighted.-New York Weekly.
"Who is the master of this house?"
asked. the agent Of the man who an
swered his ring. WELL" was the curl
Gus response, in resigned tone, II am
the husband and father."-Llfe.
First little girl-"And isn't your cat
afraid of micew Second little girl
"Oh, no, not single bit" First little
girl-"That's queer. And she's a lady
cat, too, isn't she?"-Somerville Jour-
nal.
Van Pelt-'Isn't $4 day rather high
for a hotel in the mountains" Land
lord-"But my dear sir, you should
think Of the scenery" Van Pelt-"How
much do you charge for thatT-New
York World.
whats the matter with that horseT'
said the animals owner at the race
track. "He's fast asleep" replied the
stable boy. "Well, leave him that way.
It's the only time he is ever fast
Washington Star.
"He has money to burn" is phrase
played out,
In this season before dog days are
felt;
And now to ease a financial doubt,
We are prone to say, HE has Ice to
melt"
Mrs. Keene-Mason. Mr.. Keene-
What, dear? Mrs. Keene-The next
time we 60 to the opera, buy your
friend a seat alongside Of us so you
won't have to run out to see him be-
tween acts.-Boston Courier.
Cass-But how do you know that was
Benedict's wife that sat beside him In
the train? Bass-Why, didn't you no
tee that he addressed all of his CONVEX
sation to the lady In the next seat?-
Boston Transcript.
Fond Father-I hardly know what
business to put my son In. l know
practically nothing about his ability.
Friend-Take him for a sea voyage.
That will show what there Is In him.
Philadelphia Record.
"Mamie Is such conscientious little
goose" said one summer girl to an
other. FLOWS that?" ''She thinks she
must 60 to the trouble Of breaking one
engagement before contracting anoth-
er."-Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
Edwin-what do you think ! have In
this locket, dearest? The postage
stamp on your last letter. 1t has been
touched by your lips. 1t often touches
mine. Angelina-Oh, Edwin, I'm so
very sorry. l moistened that horrid
postage stamp on Fido's dear, damp
noseI--The Waterbury.
"The summer girl Is only little low
er that the angels" remarked the young
man In knickerbockers. "Wait until
YOU pay for her ice cream, her boat
rides, her merry-go-round trips, and
you'll think she comes a good sight
higher" replied the cynic.-Yonkers
Statesman.
cts a great pity" said the convicted
burglar to his lawyer. that you
couldn't have made that closing speech
of yours at the opening Of the case"
81 don't see that 1t would have made
any difference" 1T would, though.
Then the jury would have been asleep
when the evidence came In and I'd
have stood some observation-disclosures
Star.
Pawnbrokers' Signs.
The sign Of "the three balls" adopted
By pawnbrokers Is borrowed from that