The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-18

are not surely the DEGREES of the Interchangeable
laws of nature? Everything in life seems
meaningless If we merely drift with the tide
chanted world, in which all recognize that they
| are prisoners, but dare not break their bonds"
"The worlds governed by the paradox of in
exorable inevitable law and chance At 40
| man should be stofc-or he can hardly es-
| cape being fool / hope, since the grim acct
| dent of poverty will not allow of my being a
poet that at least necessity has taught me to
"Oh, but hope to see you give the devil the
| slip one of these days, and then-ah, 1 wonder
if then you would be happy"
cat 40 years of age l cannot afford any
| longer to delude myself with O'Clock in the
morning milleniums. That credulity was the
error OF my youth, which misled me into Grub
street and for twenty years has made me the
mock of dreams lived on O'Clock in the
morning millenniums for years, but one must
reluctantly come to wisdom. l take the world
as find it now, and deny myself even the
| qualification of the spleen. When ones youth
is gone one can play the game with more
! equanimity, and in such moments as these, in
an eddy, with the world roaring around. one
| spectator. But at 40 one is looking for the cure
of enthusiasm and not for its repair"
! She felt something tighten about her heart
| and turned to him impulsively, and then
looked in silence across the pond at the toy
| boat becalmed in the middle, and thought how
it typifed his life.
| he was watching some SparrOWS hopping
around the waters edge, picking about for
| food and bathing themselves in some puddles !;
but her movement caused him to glance round
at her-and for some reason she flushed.
SIN such sunlit world as this it almost
seems, with first glance around, that we could
trust ourselves wholly to God and nature, with
out fear of the morrow"
| eyes," she answered, smiling at his fancy.
at is all very beautiful and calm, with its
music and light and motion. Those little spar
rows there are at peace with all the world !;
| they carry no burden of spiritual sorrow, and
nature is only kind mother to them.
He laughed in a strange, half-mocking way
that grated upon her ears, and caused her to
look up at him sharply.
| "At peacel Look at the little British beggars
fighting and beating those bluebirds One
would suppose that with the whole earth and
earth and sky open to them, they had room
| enough to go their way, and find their food
and shelter without collision. But they are
our playfellows and companions in the grim
game of nature and don't know how large is
| their world-only how keen is their momentary
| necessity. All life preys upon life. The strug-
gle for existence is being waged among the
silent weeds at our feet, among the bright nod
ding flowers over yonder, among these trees
| towering serenely above our heads-even be-
tween the beasts and the vegetable world
| The trees are symbols of fully developed
beauty, growth and peace. But the beech and
the birch, the oak and the fir, for all their maj
esty and tranquility, are engaged in murder
GUS warfare and starye each other without
| mercy. The conflict is unceasing throughout
all nature, and even the inorganic elements
| participate in it. For man alone is there a
| refuge, and that is in the mind of man. We
are capable of reasoning, of reflection, of gain
| ing knowledge from accumulated experience
! OF provision. Organized intelligence could
strip the cosmic process for us of half its ter
rors and severity, but the vain Imagination of
! greed has made reason the greatest curse of
| existence. 1t is the mind of man and not the
| cosmic process that enslaves our thoughts
And in summing up the bitterness of life we
| should remember this. Only stoicism is posi-
| ble-and that is difficult without epicurean
satisfactions. Thus the cosmic idea of the mil
| lions pins us all down to the bitter round of
the shop, and insight can no more escape the
grim game of these perverted imaginations
than 1t can escape the bare necessities of ma
ture upon which it is all reared. 1t is game
! OF desperation. The mind in possession
OF itself can only hold the solace of
a serene acquiescence in the unknown
ultimate ends of the unknowable eter-
nal intelligence. It is not the mere neces-
sity of nature that makes the irony of free will,
for free will is nurtured in necessity. 1t is
simply the greed of man that has made free
will very motley of servitude. But God and
nature are Indifferent to thought and passion,
and SO we must play the smaller game of men
as if it were the greater. We are abandoned to
the merciless tyranny of each days physical
necessities and so as the everyday round of
life is governed by the dogmas of unholy fam
tasy and the knowledge of nature is ignored
or but adds a touch of bitterness, we can rea-
son out the faulty of the game, but must play
it as if blindtolded, and get our wits and peck
cts plckeQ we all dcknOWIeQSe Tree Will as q
matter OF speculative philosophy, but we aban-
don free will for bed and board and the priv
ilege of hopping with clipped wings in the
ring OF civilized society 1t is myth OF polite
card parties; it is the trump card, the honors
of the world OF crime, but is severely forbidden
to responsibility. All, it is all game, and a
chance at the start. we must learn to accept
the inevitable"
"That makes life gloomy business, although
1t may be true. For myself | must cling to
md
mind and emotion, for we must be superior to
any fortuitous circumstance, either of the So
c1al world or nature. And then nature does
not let us all discover that we are the sport of
chances and purposes more gross than our high
hopes. 1t would be unbearable to believe that
our thoughts, our aspirations, and emotions
were all hopelessly imprisoned and rendered
impotent by our mere bodily needs"
"'Tis so. need but little more than the
sparrows, but have to give up all my thought
and life for that little. 1 pay a heavy price for
mere existence, and cannot help envying the
sparrows; for though they are in the game
with the rest OF us they are happy in the salts
faction of their instincts and carry no burden
of futile thought and passion"
"But our one sublime compensation is that
in the possession OF reason we are assured of
God"
"Ah, no; God is caught impotent in the game.
He can only secure good through evil-a bad
necessity, which gives US the pain and life as
we see it-whichever way we turn. There is q
lust in nature that impels US all to seek more
than abundance and SO cheat ourselves"
"Well, must cling to the idea of God su-
perior to the game. And then, too, there is
another factor in life that is only at it's highest
perfection in the freedom and perfection of
reason-love; the human love of comprehen-
sion, that lifts out of its petty round and fills
it with gladness and purpose. Surely human
love in this world gives the game some moral
meaning? 1t lifts our intentions and impulses
at least out of the swirl of mere chance. And
even chance ceases to be the omnipotent dis
burser of happiness or woe when love holds the
spirit more precious than the things it may
do. 1t seems to me this is just as much in ma
ture as the law of conflict
"But love is only another of natures lures to
gain her own ends at any cost to US through
our selfshness. All our finest emotions but
serve the gross purposes of nature ultimately