The Corvallis gazette. [volume] (Corvallis, Or.) 1862-1899, 1895-11-14
BEHIND THE SCENES.

'You see, my boy" said Uncle Ho-
bart, ''matrimony is dangerous thing.
You take house for, say, year, and
if it doesn't suit at the years end you
give it up and take another. You buy
horse, and if it balks you send it off
to auction to be sold. But with wife
it is altogether different. You can nei-
ther sell nor exchange her-it's life
long bargain
"But, Uncle Hobart, said the nephew
and heir apparent of that gentleman,
''let's take another view of the matter.
Suppose that she is all that is lovely,
excellent and desirable?'
Uncle Hobart Renshaw rubbed his
nose.
AS an inveterate bachelor of five and
fifty he was naturally inclined to take
the less sanguine view of the case.
"Paul," said he, sits of no use to
argue the matter. A young man in love
is young man mad for the time being.
If you've made up your mind to get
married, not all the arguments in crea-
tion will avail against it. Only be sure
you make right choice. Remember
uOW ~.
Paul Fontaine laughed good humored-
ly. Like all young men, he thought SO
much caution quite unnecessary.
''There are two sisters of these Lind
leys, you say?'' said Uncle Hobart re-
flectively, polishing his glittering spec
taole glasses.
1.-TWO, sir-Emily and Esther. -
''Both of 'em pretty?"
''As twin blush roses, sir.
''There you gol'' said Uncle Hobart
testify. Right into sentiment, just like
three volume novel; -
''Well, sir, isn't it natural enough to
compare a pretty girl to a beautiful
flower? If j could think of any other
comparison"-
"You needn't trouble yourself. " in
terrupted Uncle Hobart. "What want
to find out is what they are like.
ESTHER is bright and sparkling;
Emily is all softness and refinement.
Esther is brunette, with the blacklist
hair / ever saw. Emily has chestnut
curls and blue eyes, and lovely, fair
complexion
Exactly" Uncle Hobart hummed
an old tune which had been popular in
his youth:
Black eyes most dazzle at bail;
Blue eyes most please when shadows fall.
"And which do you like best, Paul,
eh?''
''They are both Of them charlningp
energetically answered the young man.
''Upon my life, uncle, 1 sometimes wish
that the Turkish system prevailed here,
and that could marry both of them" I"
Difficult to decide which is the most
fascinating?" questioned Uncle Hobart.
''But the thing is, my lad, which will
wash and wear the best for everyday
life?"
''That is question which the future
will decide, uncle. Unfortunately we
have no chemical test to decide the mat
ter
''Think not?" said Uncle Hobart dry
ly. "Look here, Paul, up to the present
time you have only seen these girls
through the chiaroscuro of visiting dress
and company manners. What would
you give to behold them as they really
are-to get peep behind the soenes?"
''Half that am possessed of, unolel"
cried out Fontaine, with animation. eff
only to be able to satisfactorily prove to
you, sir, how pure and noble and high
souled they are. But all this is non
sense. OF course it is an impossi bilityl"
Nothing of the Sort" said Uncle
Hobart. "You say that up to the pres
ent these girls do not know me personal
ly or of my connection with the board
of health. Well, it is true that l am
neither wizard nor magician, but l
am what is quite as useful in this mat
ter-a sanitary official. go into peo-
ple's back doors when wish it. stride
remorselessly through their kitchens and
cellars when l want to see for myself
rather than trust my inspectors I am
at liberty to take down stairs view of
the world. Eh, young man, what do
you think Of that?"
Paul Fontaine stared.
''I don't understand how''-
"But you will, doubtless, when tell
you that the Lindleys' house is in my
district; that have decided to go there
tomorrow morning to see personally
that all the drainage is perfect. If you
choose to volunteer little help, I'll
disguise you as one of my men and"-
with all my heart, uncle!' cried
the young man, with glittering eyes
and heightened color. 81 fear no ordeal
to which you can subject Esther and
Emily. Believe me, the metal will ring
truel''
"Well, we'll see, said Mr.. Renshaw.
"In the meantime suppose you ring for
tea.
.
Mr. Hobart Renshaw was a man Of
property, but he was also man of Pc
ouliarities. One Of these was to earn