Waterbury evening Democrat., 1895-07-18
THE LTMEKILN CLUB.
HON. HIGGlNROTTOM LAWLESS OF
 MISSISSIPPI IS INTRODUCED.

And After Brother Gardner's Introductory
 Speech Brother Lawless Delivers a Few
 Telling Remarks Sentiment Which
 Are Received With Wild Applause.
 II wish heah to diSplain, said Broth CT Gardner as he adjusted his spcctacles and brushed mp his front hair, II wish to displain dat dc Hon. Higginbottom Lawless of KosciuskO, Miss. am present ill de aunty room an burnin to deliber his celebrated address OH Sentiment. He arTovC heah three or four days ago an has finished my las bari of apples, worn my Sunday coat right along an will be (leadhead on me till he can spoke dis piece an cotch mixed freight train gwine to Toledo. Dc committee will escort him, all if dat water pail am upset or alIy lamps knocked down door ill his dclibcry de guilty wretch or wretchcs will receive lesson dat will remain solid for a hundred 'arS. v
 Tho Hon. LawleSs appeared with a pair of red mittens ill one hand and lemon in the other, and such was his placidity of mind that when he bit into one of the mittens i'll place of the lemon he never even changed color. He sized up feet and 6 inches, intelligent ex- pression, head cast ill the shape of pear, and feet large enough to trample an onion bed out of sight. He mounted the platform like steer climbing side hill, bowed right and left in response to the applause, and quietly began:
 My fren's, cannot dispress de pleas ure an gracs cslicashun which I feel to fin myself Standin heah under de s2cred shingles of Paradise hall-a str rture whose name am |; household word whar- eber de English language greets do ear. Applause. I would rather stan heah dan be buried under $1O,000 monu- ment. [CheerS
 ''De subjick ob my address am Senti- ment. What am sentiment? Whar' do we get it, an what am it worf by de pound when dc market am not ober- stocked? I answer dat sentiment am sort O 'lasses an mush surroundin de heart In some cases it hardens up an turns to stun, while in oders it thins out until dc heart fairly floats in pond O sweetness. [Applausc. Sentiment has considcrabul to do wid cbery ackshun ill our cberyday life. It am biZncss when you start out to bOrry q pan of flour or . basket ob taters. It am sentiment dat causes naybur to lend, instead of de- mandin spot cash. Wild applause from Judge Cadaver.
 "Bizness acktuatcs de lazy an dc shift less to SOt out all beg cold vittles an ole clothes all dimes all quarters. Sentiment acktuateS women to shed tears ober 'em an stock 'cm up wid huff to loaf on fur mother month. When we have a kickin hOSs, our sentiment am pealed to. We argy dat de safety of our loved ones re- 0uireS us to trade dat anamile off to some preacher who wants a perfectly re- liable hoss. Dat t's one kind of sentiment. When we buy an excurshun ticket to Niagara falls an reach de grand cataract artpr 30 hours sweat on cattle cars, de immense waste of water 'pcals to an noder sort of sentiment. When we luv, we reveal another phase of sentiment. If de gal am high toned an rich, de sen- timent am all solid. If she am only average an ill debt fur her las spring hat, de sentiment am purity thin an won't last longer dan de first bill fur meat comes in. [Cries of You bet T
 My fren's, sentiment writes poetry wid one han an tans de backs of de chil- len wid do oder. It guides our thoughts to fren's ober de sea, an sends olde clothes to relashuns in Wisconsin. It makes us shed tears fur de dead, an yit warns us to cut de undertaker's bill down 20 per cent. Sentiment tells us to luv our feller men, an yit whispers to us to lock our doahs all place torpedoes i'll our henroosts. [Groans. I have bin lookin into de matter fur de las is y 'ars, an has cum to de conclushun dat it was wise thing to purvide de human race wid sentiment.
 If it had bin lef' out by any acci- dent ill de miXin, de bes' man among us wouldn't have got bid if put up at aucshun along with lot ob fenceposts. could talk to you fur three straight weeks on dis subjeck, but obsarvin dat my half hour am up will chop off right heah an hope dat it may be my pleasure at some fucher day to meet you agin. Any pusson who wants his fortune told will fin me in de aunty room fur de next two hours. [Cheers and yells and such vigorous stamping that three lamps and 22 feet of stovepipe fell down, and Brother Gardner adjourned the meet ing. M. Quad ill Detroit Free Press.