The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1895-11-16
KERlELLA'S PHILOSOPHY +.
His Remarks on Things Theatrical and
otherwise.

Otherwise.
The Sivic Federashrn maid a Klean
Sweep Bekos they wer out fer the Dust,
an that's no Dreem. Wot this we're
Kountry needs is moar fire sails an moar
breweries itelyou, bekos it's goan to be
La hard winter and the merry sand-bag-
ger is wurking oyer time weltin' folkes
over the temples with a littel chunk OF
led pipe an smashin' in there lectures
with beer nallets, and the festive plum
mer Krise Allowed fur War and an APP
propriashun, and Hairy Harry Hoboe
lurx aroun after Dark holdin' pepul up,
an dodgin' the fiji Hops and tacklin' the
hot free lunch, an smilin' pensive, says
the Chicago Inter Ocean.
A Boys best friend is his hacker now
adays, bekos it's goan to be a kold VIM
ter, an the prize fife not settled ana
Lanky Bob Fitzsimmons will go back on
the steerage to New iceland, and foxey
jim Corbett will give the Drama INT
an get the lock jaw frum overWorkln
his mouth, an the luther short hare
skrappers Will be peddlin' rugs to the
first familys, or kuttin' hare, or morne.
fully carryin' the llod or selling trlpe an
pigs feet to the doWntrodden, tollln
thirsty, Wesside massis an hustlln 1ur
there pork an beens l scene Rlchara
| Mansfield play CDR. Jekyl an Mr.. Hyde
Hear Laitly an he kan make you snaver
and make the Kold chills Kreap down
your bax in CRATE shape, good pepul, an
that's: no idle Dreem.
9s r 10 Cfo
de drag wiAll the toilin, Huskey massis
NV Branaghan's Patch that Seenyor Ed
die Foy haz. Why, when Eddie kums
out snlokin' that torch an smilin' slckly
an staggerin' roun' like Kamil an
Krise Allowed Keep your on Duly,
why, every bcotblack upinde gallerle
bowels himself black in the face an, the
bell boys split the roof with there
STREAMS Nv joy, and the sturdey young
Brass Finishers and Steem Filters yell
Like Deemuns, an Bust there sides with
Honust Merriment an Kri Allowed,
"He's all the gait muneyr' It's no ylse
tawkin'. Richerd Mansfield doan't appeal
To the unfettered Wesside Mn!titood.
He's little too rich fur there blud, itel-
YOU, good pepul. 1t talk J. w. Kelly, the
Rolling Mill Man, the cherished idle Nv
the Beer Bottlers' Yunion, to pack the
INse11n every mite an to rouse up their
sturdy massis, and to chear up their
Polk street hearts singing that tender
an touching little roulade Since
Bridget Donned the Bloonlers an Earth
quake Struck the Town.
DR.. Jekyl wuz Kove witch lived
bubble life an you want to Keap your
ize pealed fur them Blol1es, good pepul
They are tuff sitizens, as Mark Twayne
w,,d say. When he wanted to go out
san oaggin mites DIR. JelSyl yused TO
syaller sum green KcH drops and change
himself into a .Hunchback an sharpen
his trusty Blaid an grab a big chunk NY
Led Pipe and sasllay down Halsted street
slashin' left an rite. Robert Louis SSeF-
q. son. witch dide hear lately, rote the
story. an it hain't quite 50 soft ana sen
timental as that gllshin' yung temals
g;rrul Laura Jeen Libbey, Wot rites sftch
luvly drive] fur the Baggage Smashers
Munlhlay Richerd Mansheld IS an
Aneriken Ackter and didn't KUN over
Hear in a Katie ship or in the stserage
NV the Canlpania, and duzzent ware peA
NV se1l1nd-hand NEEDLES IKE Jooiyn's
rho Juerlar. but he's q CRATE ackter, and
lie nunch de Kids He'd wot seq he hain't,
an that settles it. good pepul. Rosey
n.Neil] wot's briter'n me in frackshuns
an iografee SEE this haint tru latin.
why. Rosey O'Neill'sl a doll-baby face
little girl wot's as Jealous NV me as she
Kan be. Rosey O'Neill never tide tin
kan to a Dogs tale in her life. Ef you
WIZ to merely asst her she wud burst
inro teers like a little Kowerd an shake
her yalow Kurls like q little kanary
bird an skream allowed. Kline Sir,
doan't asst me to steal barls fur that BON
ere bekos lime oney a. title dirl wot's
got no sand Rosey O Neill doan,5 sit
on mi Kote down at the Lake Front an,
Kear SlIore fur de Red Hots. Rosy y :
Neill's a little rabbit wot dent take
upinde gallery to sea EIenery Irving.
JAMES r. KENSELLA.