The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1895-08-16
THE LIMEKILN CLUB.
HON. HleGlNBoTToM LAWLEss OF
MISSISSIPPI is INTRODUCED.

And After Brother Gsrdner's Introductory
Speech Brother Lawiess Delivers . Few
Telling Remarks on Sentiment which
Are Received with wild Applause.
II wish heah to displain, u said Broth
er Gardner as he adjusted his spectacles
and brushed up his front hair, 81 wish
to displain dat de Hon. Higginbottom
Lawless Of Kosciusko, Miss. am present
in de aunty room an burnin to deliber
his celebrated address on Sentiment
He arrove heah three or four days ago
an has finished my has bari of apples,
worn my Sunday coat right along an
will be a deadhead ON me till he can
spoke dis piece an cotch a mixed freight
train gwine to Toledo. De committee
will escort him, an if dat water pail am
upset or any lamps knocked down door
i'll his delibery de guilty wretch or
wretches will receive lesson dat will
remain solid for hundred airs. "
The Hon. Lawless appeared with q
pair of red mittens in one hand and a
lemon in the other, and such was his
placidity of mind that when he bit into
one of the mittens in place of the lemon
he never even changed color. He sized
up feet and @ inches, intelligent ex-
preston, head cast in the shape of
pear, and feet large enough to trample
an onion bed out of sight. He mounted
the platform like a steer climbing a side
hill, bowed right and left in response to
the applause, and quietly began
my fren's, / cannot dispress de pleas
ure an gratificashun which l feel to fin
myself standin heah under de sacred
shingles of Paradise hallLa structure
whose name am household word whar-
eber de English language greets de ear.
Applause. would rather stan heah
dan be buried under a $40, 200 monu-
ment. [Cheers.
DE subjiok OBJ my address am Senti-
ment What am sentiment? Whar' do
we get it, an what am it WORT by de
pound when de market am not ober-
stocked? l answer dat sentiment am
sort o 'lasses an mush surroundin de
heart In some cases 1t hardens up an
turns to stun, while in oders it Trims out
until de heart fairly floats in pond o.
sweetness. Applause. Sentiment has
considerable to do wild cherry aclzshun in
our eberyday life. 1t am bizuess when
you start ont to borry pan of -four or n
basket Oh taters. 1t am sentiment dat
causes a naybur to lend, instead # de-
mandin spot cash. wild applause from
Judge Cadaver.
"Bizness acktuates de lazy an de shift
less to sot ont an beg cold vittles an ole
clothes an dimes an quarters Sentiment
acktuates women to shed tears ober 'em
an stock 'em up wild huff to loaf ON fur
mother month. When we have kickin
boss, our sentiment am 'pealed to. We
argy dat do safety of our loved ones re-
quires us to trade dat anamile off to
some preacher who wants perfectly re-
liable boss. Dat s one kind of sentiment.
When we buy an excurshun ticket to
Niagara falls an reach de grand cataract |
arter a 80 hours sweat on cattle cars, de |
immense waste of water 'peals to an
noder sort of sentiment. When we luv, |
we reveal another phase of sentiment. |
If de gal am high toned an rich, de SEN
timent am all solid. II she am only |
average an in debt fur her las spring |
hat, de sentiment am purity thin an |
won't last longer dan de first bill fur |
meat comes in. [Cries of "You bet n
My fren's, sentiment writes poetry |
wild one han an tans de backs of de chill |
len wild de oder. 1t guides our thoughts |
to fren's ODER de sea, an sends olde |
clothes to relashuns in Wisconsin. It
makes us shed tears fur de dead, an yit |
warns us to cut de undertaker's bill |
down 20 per cent. Sentiment tells us to |
luv our Teller men, an yit whispers to us
to lock our doahs an place torpedoes in |
our henroosts. Groans. have bin |
lookin into de matter fur de las AS y airs, |
an has cum to de conclushun dat it |
was wise thing to purvide dc human
race wild sentiment
IF it had bin lef' out by any acct |
dent in do mixin. dc bes man among us
wouldn't have got bid if put up at
aucshun along with lot OBJ fenceposts.
I could talk to you fur three straight
weeks on dis subjeck. but obsarvin dat
my half hour am up l will chop off
right heah an hope dat it may be my
pleasure at some fucher day to meet you
agin. Any pusson who wants his fortune
told will fin me in do aunty room fur de
next two hours" Cheers and yells and
such vigorous stamping that three lamps
and 22 feet of stovepipe fell down, and
Brother Gardner adjourned the meet
ing, M Quad in Detroit Free Press.