The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1895-08-19
woeLeswoRTH NEEDS EXERCISE.

giving q little scream and backing away.
'tDon t shy, - grinned Mr.. WiggleswoFth;
q 'twont bite. It's croquet set, y he add
ed triumphantly, throwing open the lid
and disclosing the brightly painted mallets
and balls.
''O-o-o-h-hp' cried Mrs Wigglesworth,
clapping her hands. ''How nice! And will
we play with it?'
"PIay with it," mimicked Mr.. Wiggles-
worth; 'wha'd We think we d do; hang it
on the parlor wall? Might wear it to the
governors reception, L s'pose. Or mebbe
the hired girl would like to stuff a turkey
with it-she's tried most everything else"
Finishing his dinner to the accompani-
ment of this cheerful style of comment,
which Mr.. Wigglesworth, along with other
men, kept in reserve especially for his
wife, he went out on the lawn and adjust
ed the wire hoops according to diagram.
E'Best exercise in the world, - he boast
ed waving a mallet IN the air. "Old
Wetherbee told me he reduced his weight
nine pounds in two weeks. Come down
herel'' he called to his wife, land let's
have a game. >"
Mrs. Wigglesworth adjusted the ball IN
der her husbands direction.
FDO knock it through this first wicket
1rst?'' she asked.
Course" tartly answered Mr.. Wiggles-
worth; ''think .ye had to knock it through
the last one first? Might try to get it
through the seventh one fourth, 1 s'pose
Mrs Wigglesworth's new rules for croquet,
got up by herself
Putting her tongue between her teeth,
Mrs. Wigglesworth struck smartly at the
ball and dug hole in the lawn. Quickly
recovering, she dealt second stroke, avoid
ed the ball and tore the wicket out of the
ground.
'sThat's the way" howled Mr.. Wiggles-
worth. ''That's the way to go through
the wickets."
He took the bent wire from his wife's
mallet and thrust it back in the ground.
"Lemme show ye,' he said in tone of
Importance, while Mrs. WiggIesworth
stood back and adjusted her hair.
Mr.. WiggleswOrth sent his ball through
the first wicket, and nearly got it through
the second and probably would have done
SO anyway if the minister hadn't leaned
over the fence at that moment and discon-
certed his aim.
delightful game commented the
minister in a kindly tone. Full of life,
requiring the exercise of skill and an adj
mirable discipline for the temper. I am
very fond of it.
Encouraged by this favorable opinion,
Mrs. Wigglesworth hunted her ball under
the wire arch and struck the ball of her
opponent
''Bravo!" cried the minister, gleefully
clapping his hands. GA good stroke.
Now, you can croquet his ball out of your
way
He explained how this could be done,
and under his instruction Mrs. Wiggles-
worth sent her husbands ball merriIy
bounding to the far extremity of the lawn,
slowly followed by the husband himself,
muttering. The minister was a finished
ance Mrs. Wigglesworth discovered a skill
that nobody could have believed she ever
was capable of Smoothly she glided
through the wickets, tapped pleasantly
against the turning stake, and then set
her sails for the return home, while anon
she would set upon her husband the OPP
posing ball and send it out of the county.
You think yourself mighty smart,
don't yep Mr.. Wigglesworth Kissed be-
tween his gritted teeth to his wife when
the minister's back was turned.
Mrs. Wigg1esworth suffered little smile
of triumph to momentariIy flicker into her
face and at that the blood of Wigglesworth
boiled over.
"Who's playing this game anyway he
snorted, glaring at the minister
"Why, Ellery'' expostulated Mrs. Wig
ellsworth.
81 can beat the whole box and dice of
ye!' calculated her husband angrily, as
with lucky stroke the balls collided. The
full knowledge of the indignities put upon
him in the game singed through his recol-
lection, and he trod the balls into close
conjunction.
"Look out there!'' he warned, waving
the minister to one side.
Then he put his foot on the ball, lifted
his mallet alOft and smote with a strength
born of long bottled up anger. The maliet
shrieked through its circle, there was a
momentary agitation of the atmosphere
and Mr.. Wigglesworth was rolling among
the wtCkets with his foot in both hands
and connected stream of yells issuing
from his lips, such as the minister said
afterward he could never have believed
the human lungs were equal to producing.
''Wow-wow-wo - howled Mr.. Wig
ellsworth, curling about the home stake
and thrusting one leg up toward the heav-
ems while ne still gripped the other foot
affectionately.
Let me help you, suggested the min
lister, leaning over him with look Of SYM
pathy in his countenance
Mr.. Wigglesworth Strengthened out Ike
a cracked spring.
''You get out of this yardl'' he yelled.
Don't you think because 1 go to your
church and drop an envelope in the con-
tribution box that you can come around
here putting on airs and trying to make
my wife think she's the head of the fam
! ilyl 1 want you to understand that l can
run this ranch without any
With face frozen in horror the minis
ter had already dashed up the street, and
Mr.. Wigglesworth turned the battery on
his wife But that lady had discreetly van
| ished
A neighbor saw man pacing wildly
| about the lawn, waving above his head a
| painted mallet. At every blow, struck
with terrific violence, a wire wicket would
go sailing through the air and rattle upon
the barn roof far distant. The man limped
dreadfully, the neighbor said, and accom-
panied each limp with a groan and some
remarks that were more than adequate to
the occasion. So there is no doubt that it
was Mr.. Wigglesworth.-New York Re
|