The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1895-01-31
AN AFTnRNooN faA,
-Four Companions in Single Bessedness
Discuss Rules of Table Etiquette.

DISCUSS Rules OF IaDle Etiquette.
We were chatting over our tea-cups-
we four old maids-and a very pleasant
half-hour it had been, too, that dismal
afternoon for
1.-THE day is cold and dark and dreary
1t rains, and the wind is never weary
Three of US, Miss D., Miss w. and
myself, had accepted the kind invita-
tion of Miss B. to spend the afternoon
with her at her comfortable home up
on the hill.
We talked, of course, and though 1
say 1t myself, the quality of the con-
versation was made better rather than
poorer, by the quantity, to which each
was willing to contribute.
Now please do not he formal said
Miss b., as we were seated around the
small, square table "formality is all
right in It's place, but I do get so tired
of it and just dread going out to din
ner It's really a great pleasure to be
all by ones self occasionally and 1t
for once, at least, a good plain dinner
can be eaten without That overpowering
fear that some unreasonable rule of
etiquette will be violated. We must be
like so many mechanical beings when
we are in company-must say nothing
do nothing-nor even smile, unless ii be
in accordance with set rules that are
laid down for Us by those vino, perhaps,
lack the true spirit of politeness. So
please be free, ladies, and enjoy your
selves for once"
Formally! Why, my dear Miss B.,
we do not know what formality is here
in Astoria" exclaimed Miss w. You
ought to dine with some of Portlands
leaders of society if you want to talk
about the severity of the rules of So
ciety."
Society so called" responded Miss
B.
every we'll, but let me add that Port
lands elite would be utterly bewildered
in the ordinary social circles of San
Francisco"
For my part" volunteered Miss D..
II think there are many advantages
gained by the complication Of rules
of etiquette, though ] agree with Miss
B. that when we are in society we can
not be ourselves but must be as some
Frenchman says we should be. I like
to be free from the limitations of rules |
as we'll as any one, but yet these same
rules are protection in many ways. |
They keep out those who are not by
nature fitted for high social circles !
and maintain the standard of refine !
ment required of those who are fitted"
"You think, then, that society peo-
pie are born, not lE.ade?" I inquired.
IF Christ wlEs to return to earth and
appear among us in the form and dress
of an ordinary being, would the society
leaders of today admit Him to their
select gatherings I
Each person must go in his own
class, of course and the church peo-
pie would welcome Him to the circle
of their social acquaintance"
Even If he failed to appear in prop
err dress on the various occasions?' 7
inquired.
well, 1 do not feel very certain as
to that. You know, I'm not very
much of a church woman, and what
is more, l have very little confidence in
fashionable church members. They re-
mind me too much of the naughty
Pharisoe and of the illustration Of the
camel and the needles eye" answered |
Miss D.
But to return to the subject of rules
of etiquette" I interposed, do you
know that many of the most fashion,
able people are really rude in some
things. and that habitually, too? Now
I have in mind a little phrase that is,
I believe, used by nearly every host
and hostess in the United States, and
vet it is exceedingly impolite. True
poiiteness, it would seem to me, would
necessitate doing all that one can tc
make others comfortable and happy'
and avoiding what will cause pain or
dispieasure but many time I've been
very much embarrassed by being asked
Miss Templeton may l help you 10
another piece of this chicken; Or
Won't vou have another cup of tea?
That is to say: We know you have
been served once, and have eaten all
that was given you, but we VIII oner
Won more Besides, every one at the
table is to be notified that 1 am to be
served a second time, although 1t Is
bad enough to be reminded myself OF
what I have eaten. How much better
If that word another or its equivalent
more had been left out and the ques-
tion asked thus: May help you TO
a niece of chicken OF course this may
be a form of expression used only by
the common people. for you know I've
not been much among the highest
classes. but it has never been my
happy lot to dine outside the walls of
old Vassar when that phrase ""' "0'
used
.Wer, 1 never thought of it before
but it really does sound better to speak
as you suggest" said Miss g., APPROX
ingly.
I'm certain that have heard that
expression used in tho best society,
anyway, though it does seem to be
wrong" added Miss e.
Excuse, me ladies, if write that
down in my note book among the com
mon errors to he guarded against said
Miss D., as she produced a memoran-
DUN book and pencil.
Wont you have another cup OF
tea. Miss W." asked our hostess, and
then we all enjoyed hearty laugh al