The Coalville times. [volume] (Coalville, Utah) 1894-1923, 1895-04-05
FUN IN THE COURT.
REPORTS FURNISH FOOD FOR
HEARTY LAUGHTER.
The Unfortunate Position Of Monigon-
gomery, g. J-Judge Cuttings Con
tempt for lawyer lorsymen Not
Held In Respect

Many Of the law reports arc full Of
curious judicial slips. In Georgia
case. for instance. tho Judge giving
the opinion says that Montgomery
G. J. was provldontially prevented
from presiding In this case" This
may have been n whack at Montgom-
cry G. j. or at the lawyer who argued
II before tho weary Judge. This isn't
quite as bad, however. as the thoo-
logical slip Of a Nebraska Judge in n
supreme court case. In which he holds
that "the law prosumes against the
carrier unless he shows that Il was
done by the kings enemies or by such
an act Of God a. could not happen by
the Intervention Of man. His opinion
OF the relative positions OF God and
man recalls the story OF tho Adams
county justice who had occasion TO
punish party for gross profanity
used In open court. "for taking the
name OF Almighty God In vain, said
this worthy successor OF Mr. Justice
Shallow, II shall fine you ten dollars.
and for offending tho dignity OF this
court you viii pay lno Of fifty dol
lars and costs or 20 10 Jail"
Law-makors furnish ~ quito a.
funny mistakes as law writer's. When
the supreme court Of California came
20 pass upon the charter Of tho city Of
Oakland n few years ago. they said
OF tho phrascology Of the charter. that
1.-THE Joint labors Of Malaprop and
Parilngton could scarcely have made
such collocation or dislocatlon Of
words and sentences as did this legis-
laior. Among other things Il gives
the board Of trustees power 10 llconso
aud suppress dram shops. horse
racing. gambling houses, houses Of
ill-lamc and all indecent and immoral
practices. shows AMI amuscmonts.
Such llconso powor might do In
New iork-it scandalizcd the pious
town Of Oakland.
II clcrgymcn wish TO know their
rating In the pondcrous slSccpslSin
tones, they can find II out by begin
ming with the very earliest English
law books In existence. In ono OF the
Black letter Year books In appears
that some one had boon so unlSlnd as TO
call a preacher a fool. The preacher
brought suit for SANDER and the de-
fcndant justified. Us tho lawyers say;
that l.. he claimed that what he said
was not SANDER but gospel truth. and
hc showed that the words spoken
could not hurt tho clergyman, ''for
NlauN ann utHs ~
law" that "a parson might DO good
parson and still be fool" The court
"a held. but said that had tho words
been spoken Of n lawyer or doctor
II would have boon otherwise.
Lord Coke, tho great fountain OF
our common law, had very little use
for the preachers. says the Philadol-
phia Times, aud In his third institute
ho says that IN order that the Carmo-
lite iriars Of Flcot street might por-
form their VOWS Of chastity King Ed
ward III. had To prohibit all women
from passing through q lane next 10
tho irlar house. Apropos Of preach
ors. an old chronicle relates that whom
Alan de Neville, chief forester Of
Henry the H.. died, certain monas.
terry begged for some Of his great
wealth Tho king, with fine religious
discrimination, said; II shall take
his wealth; but you may take his car.
cass and tho doyil will got his soul"
Some OF the funniest things In the
law books arc the far-fotchcd author
files that are cited 20 establish certain
rulings, In u case tried before Jus.
tlco Fortcscuo II was claimed that tho
other sido had no right 10 b. heard.
The Judge decided that Il had III
have heard II Observed said he,
"that oven God himself did not pass
sentence upon Adam before he was
given u chance 10 defend himself.
Adam. says God, where art thoup
Hast thou not eaten OF the treo where
OF commanded thee that thou shoullst
not oat? And the same question was
put to Eve also
But for exciting loyal reading tho
famous casa reported In 10 Pa. st.
Report easily takes first prlzo. Mr.,
Justice Lewis thus dlsports himself
ON the subject Of restraining widow
from marrying Tho principle OF re-
product NJ" he says, "stands next In
Importance TO It's cldor-born corrcla.
tive, seli-proscryatlon, and Is equally
n fundamental law Of existence. II Is
tho blessing whicn tempered with
mercy the expulsion from Paradise.
II was impressed upon the human
creation by bonolcent Providence.
to multiply tho images OF Himself.
and thus TO promote his own glory
and the happiness Of His creatures.
From the lord OF the forest 10 the
monster Of tho deep, from the sub
tlety Of tho serpent TO the innocence
OF the dove, from the elastic embrace
OF the mountain kalmla 20 the descend
ing fructlncation OF the lily OF the
plaln, all nature bows submissiyely to
this primeval law. Even the flowers,
which perfume the air with their fra.
GRANGE and decorate the forests and
fields with their huos, are but cur
talns TO the nuptlal bed. Tho prlncl-
pies OF morality, the policy Of the
nation. the doctrines Of tho common
law. the law OF nature and the law OF
God unite In condomnlng as void tho
condition attempted to DO imposed
49,. ttIfa tFtNnVu