Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1895-11-02
NOT SOCIAL SUCCESSES
Some Women Pay Too Little Heed to the
Art Of Conversation.
There Are other Things to BE Con-
sidered Besides Having Merely
Something to Say.
Written for The Evening Star.

Written for The Evening Star.
With all the delight that Is popularity sup
posed to illuminate the first season. the
early experiences Of many debutantes are
full Of positive suffering, simply from a
lack of attractive conversational towers.
A girl may be possessed Of all the domestic
virtues, she may have a cultivated mind
full of fine aspirations and earnest resolu-
tons, she may be popular with her girl
friends and respected by everybody. and
yet fail to please men and secure attention
Why? Merely because she is ignorant of
the judicious method of falling into alb
sorbing talk and drawing beyond the con-
ventional phrase on to deliciously danger
Gus topics. Because. in short she has rot
the art of entering into interesting CONVEX
sation.
few rules will repay study and be of
service to the novice in society.
Do not regard conversation solely as a
race in volubility. There must be an hon
est fund of general information, an intelli-
gent interest in the everyday affairs of
life, bright personality, fresh piquancy
of expression. and the talent to conceal
ignorance or cleverness-too much of either
Is not an advantage.
If you are at a loss what to say, it will
always be safe to ask your partner for in
formation on any subject, He will be
pleased to give it, and YOU may be amused
to receive it,
You cannot ask for advice too frequently.
You are under no obligations to follow it,
and any man will be the happier for giving
it.
Never ask a question unless you can dis
play genuine Anxiety for The answer. If
you say only How do you do?" let your
tone and expression show that The ar Swer
Is of vital Importance to you.
Be confldential-occaSo nally-as to your
sentiments, thoughts and ambitions; but
never fail to mention that reserve is your
habitual characteristic and that you cannot
quite account for the irresistible Impulse
to break through 1t
Never contradict man-neve-i And if
he asks you for opinion, ALWAYS try to
give him his own.
Acquire an insight into mans character
and learn 10 understand his little weakness
es, as a medical specialist understands the
symptoms of his own particular professional
line. Then you will realize that in some
cases tender, infinite softness is necessary
to charm; in others, little rebellions and
dainty commands are most important
Always be quietly dressed. Most men have
a great admiration for demure zones and are
frequently irritably disturbed by too much
color in a gown. too emphatic dimensions
in sleeves or other fashionable exaggera-
tons. in
And. above all; be, and remain, an enigma
1t Is quite truer-then old Greek philosopher
was right-when man understands a wo-
man she ceases TO be- of interest to him.
Like poets the, charming woman is born
not made Still;J to be agreeable is in a
measure a SCIENCE. and, like other arts may
be, at least to a certain degree acquired
The art that consists of graceful tact, of
winsome compliments. of sweet nothiugs,
of deectable follies will make life plea santer
for both men and fwomen. and is quite
worthy of earnest study, for our happiness
in the world depends very much upon the
admiration we age able to inspire.