The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-11-14

Inc greatest profit. so they say,
Is that called Advertising.
West Union Gazette.
There is 4 difference between q coli
and the grip, but YOU VIII not real =
II untll you receive the doctors BIZ
Truth.
The Wife-How did you come t. ,ro-
pose to Inc. John: The Hu>oa id
wanted to be different from othe: men,
suppoSe.-I.ife.
All II Arctic explorers have enjOyed
one important advantages: in their dead
Hest perils they always keep COOL
New York Ledger.
"See here. you impostor, you've beg.
ged from me four times in the last ten
days" Huh! Yer amt got no kick;
yer amt gi'mp a cent."-Chicago Rec
ord.
My rich uncle is dead HE left
you something, did he not?" Yes"
Good. What did he leave you?' pen
ni!ess.' - Pittsburg Chronicle Tele.
graph.
Going to live in the country, eh?"
Yes" Il suppose he city air doesn't
agree with your familS?' "Well, city
airs don't agree WIN my pockethook."
Truth.
Merritt-Under the circumstances,
VIII! don't you 60 West and get a di-
yorce: Because If | had
a divorce ! might be fool enough 10
marry again.-I!fe.
This is a hard world" murmured the
young man. Yes" replied she. O Ii
doesn't realize how hard il is till n
falls off a bicycle once or twice Il week"
Washington Star.
once more the genial candidate.
Ho-h gracious and asyute.
Puts up his campaign promises
In packages to suit.
Washington Star.
Smith, see thar Jones was at thar
dinner the other night. What did he
think Of the speeches: Browu-When
! saw him he vas just going to read
them In a morning paper.-Brooklyn
Life.
Il suppose you have forgotten that
you owe ME S10," said Phillips. severe
ly. NO. l haven't" retorted Wilbur.
IL mean, 70 have done so. Give me
time. old man, and l will Harper's
Bazaar.
She-My mother is so particular about
the young men l go with. He-But she
do, Sn't object 70 me. does She: She
o., dear, no! She says she knows you
a., perfectly harmless.--New York
II ar,ild.
Miss Ingenue Ton a yacht)-Is there
rally ii cable in the ocean: Sailor
ies, mum. Miss lngenue with convic-
ion, after studying the nan at the
man.-BrOoklyn Life.
She-Did you know that Miss vii
lowsnap has been taking lessons in Del
sarte? He-Oh, yes; she showed me
how to sit down the other night. She
She didn't show YOU how to get up,
did she:-New York Herald.
The girl to her doting father brings
Her love with a fond salute;
But as time goes on there's i change IN
things
She brings him a lover to boot!
Judge.
Ethel G~otrox-Papa, you must let me
marry Jack. He says he positively
cannot live without me another day.
Old GotroX-This is more serious than
| thought il was. | had no idea he was
50 hard up as that.-\ew York Herald.
She-Well. if | can't live on my in
come, and YOU can't live on yours,
where would be the advantage in our
marrying? He (thoughtfully)-Well,
by putting III incomes together one OF
us would be able 10 live. at any rate
Harlem Life.
That was very kind Of your Uncle
TO pay your debts" "Humph. | dout
think so. He might have given me The
money and let me pay en- What
difference would tlrat have nuadeE' 1t
would have re-eStabliShed my credit
-Harper's Bazaar.
What we need to do" said the new
director, us 10 establish a sinking
fund" "Humph" said the old director.
when you've been in here a while
longer you'll have more sense, What
we need Is Il fluid that can keep Its
head above water.'-IIarper's Bazaar.
you can trust the nan who sings at
his work. said the CHEEKY citizen.
YES" replied Sinnicker: ii wish
ON one would persuade the man who
works around my wood pile w or
three nights Weeh 70 sing load enough
for me to hear him Washington star.