Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1895-08-01
Sprink1es of Spice.

Sprink1es of Spice.
Now the druggists face is beaming, as
tie nickels to him pass
And he thinks there's fun in selling
frcth at half-a-dime a glass.
Boston Courier.
isn't Smith poet?" ''No: can't
borrow quarter to have his hair cut
that's all.''-Atlanta Constitution.
First girl-"Cholly isn't such fool
as he looks" Second gi11-"No, indeed.
ne couldn't e.'-Washington Star.
Jack-"To feather your nest you must
have money! Tom-"Yes, there is
nothing so delightful as cash down.
Truth.
'She-"Have you ever loved an
other?' He-"Yes, of course. Did you
think I'd practice on a nice girl like
you?"-Life.
II hate these bicycles built for two,"
said Miss Jemmison 1T encourages
people to talk behind your back
harper's Bazaar.
Little girl-"What is tact, papa?"
Papa-"Something every woman has
and eXercises-until she gets married"
New York Weekly.
Tommy-"Paw, what is the board Of
education?' Mr. Figg-"In the days
when | went to school it was a pine
shing "-Indianapolis Journal.
He-"Is this the first time you've
ever been in love, darling?" She
(thoughtlessly)-'Ye but it's so nice
that l hope it won't be the last"'-Tit-
Bits.
Blow, blow, blow,
Wind Of the summer sea;
But you can never blow as much
AS it takes to board by thee.
Augusta, Ga, Chronicle.
Guy, do be quiet said mammas
you are so noisy I'm obliged to
make a noise, mamma; somebody
might take me- for girl ''-Philadel-
phia Times.
Clara Winterbloom-'Ther is only
enough 10 about half fill this trunk.
What shall / do, fill it with papers? 2"
>.
pack it. ''-Brooklyn Life.
"Who is the master Of this house?"
asked the agent of the man who An4
swe1 ed his ring. WELL" was the curl
olis response, in a resigned tone, Il am
the husband and Life.
First little girl-"And isn't your cat
afraid Of mice?' Second little girl
ooh, no, not single bit" First little
girl--"That's queer. And she's lady
cat, too, isn't e?''-Somerville Jour-
nal.
Van Pelt-"Isn't 81 day rather high
for a hotel in the mountains?" Land
ord-'But my dear sir, you should
hink of the scenery" Van Pelt-"How
much do you charge for that?"-New
York World.
whats the matter with that horse?"
said the animals owner at the race
track Hes fast asleep" replied the
stable boy. ''Well, leave him that way.
It's the only time he is ever fast
Washington Star.
"He has money to burn" is q phrase
played out
In this season before dog days are
felt;
And now to ease financial doubt,
We are prone to say, "He has ice to
melt"
Mrs Keene-Mason. Mr.. Keene-
What, dear? Mrs. Keene-The next
time we go to the opera, buy yohr
friend a seat alongside of us so you
won't have to run out to see him be-
tween acts.--Boston Courier.
Cass-But how do you know that was
Benedict's wife that sat beside him in
the train? Bass-Why, didn't you no.
tice that he addressed all of his CONVEX
sation to the lady in the next seat?-
Boston Transcript.
Fond Father hardly know what
business to put my son in. | know
practically nothing about his ability.
Friend-Take him for a sea voyage.
That will show what there is in him.
Philadelphia Record
Edwin-What do you think / have in
this locket dearest? The postage
stamp on your last letter. It has been
touched by your lips. 1t often touches
mine. Angelina-Oh, Edwin, I'm so
very sorry / moistened that horrid
postage stamp on Fido's dear, damp
nosev'-The Waterbury.
cts great pity" said the convicted
burglar to his lawyer, that You
couldn't have made that closing speech
of yours at the opening Of the case
II don't see that it would have made
any difference" 1T would, though.
Then the jury would have been asleep
when the evidence came in and I'd
have stood some show
Star.