The Louisiana populist. [volume] (Natchitoches, Natchitoches Parish, La.) 1894-1898, 1895-03-15
Democratic Prayer.
from Morgan's Buzz-Saw. |

chief of mugwumps, boss of the
cuckoos, and high cock-elowrem of
the low -ehighrems, We bow
down before thee as persimmOn
sprout bends beneath the weight of
a big fat 'possum. We acknowl-
edge thy greatness and glory in
our littleness. We know, most
gracious master, that thou art
more account than all of us put
together. If it were not so why
should we lie for thee, and steal
for thee? Thou speakest and thy
voice is heard throughout the land.
1t soundeth like distant thunder.
When its deep, gutteral tones are
heard, men tremble and bow down
and worship thee, but women run
and hide. They remember the ex-
perience of Maria Halpin. They
wot not what thou wisteth, neither
care they to be visited with the wo
which thou wotteth, nor VOTED
with the wist which thou wisteth.
The trusts worship-thy name and
singeth thy praises. Thou rails
eth up in the morning and goeth
fishing while the tariff bill is be-
coming a law, and the whisky trust
begetteth movement on it and
saveth millions of dollars by. Ia
king whiskey cut of the bond.
And the sugar trust senteth profits
afar OFT and ships laden with su-
gar are hurried in from foreign
ports. Oh, most gracious master,
thou art a honey. That fishing
scrape cost the country ten million
dollars, but ''we the people-thy
humble servants-pay the freight.
1t pleaseth us to do it. We wish
it was some more. We won't
complain. We are not fit for any
thing else. We ought to apollo
gize for being born and having the
semblance of men. We are fit on
ly for thy footstools-thy lick
spittles. If we have any sense we
feel like we ought to beg thy par
don, for it detracts from thy great
ness. Oh, most admirable Cleve-
land, what can we do for thee that
we haven't done to humble our
selves in thy sight! We have de-
MED our faith !; we have lied like
dogs; we have sacrificed our best
friends; we have insulted our
neighbors; we have voted poverty
upon ourselves and children; we
have neglected our wives; we have
crucifed humanity and Knocked
God in our blind worship of thee.
But we would do more, most wor-
thy master. We would lie down
on our bellies and grovel in the
dirt; we would stick our noses in
the mud; we would wriggle up to
thy feet and pare thy toe-nails with
our teeth, if to do so would only
be called Democracy. In the name
of Democracy and for Democratic
success we are willing to steal bal
lots, kill niggcrs, intimidate POpu-
lists, desecratc the ballot box, cru
city liberty, corrupt courts, buy
legislatures, and undermine our
republican institutions. If we
have any political opinions we are
willing to change them to suit thee.
Have we not done it, most adora-
BILE master! Did we not say we |
were in favor of free silver and
don't we now swear it is a fraud
and endorse thee in every conven-
ton! Did we not say that protec-
ton was a fraud and we do not
now support the Senate tariff bill
with all our strengths 1t is writ
ten, "The leopard can not chang
his spots," but we can change our
politics. 1t is also written, ''Can
the Ethiopian (which is the nigger)
change his skin?" We can, not
only change it for him Ito bright
Yellow, but we can skin HIM in
the most approved style. We are
Democrats of the modern type,
with all the latest improved
attachments. Take us under thy
tutorship. When thou wantest us
to change our principles, toot thy
bazoo, and it shall be SO. We are
thy political tumblers. When the
tooter tooteth the tumblers tumb-
leth. This is Democracy, as we
understand it. The main plank in
the platform is for us to do as we
are told. So doeth we. Let thy
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