The Universalist. [volume] (Chicago [Ill.]) 1884-1897, 1895-10-05

and as Mr.. Katy Didn't had declared
that he had felt himself aggriev
edit was decided that he ought
to keep entirely out of the affair.
Upon this, the elegant General
Hornet came forward, and in the
most dignifed and graceful manner
offered his services, saying that he
should be extremely happy at any
time either to kill, or to be killed in
the cause of so fair lady as Miss
Katy.
The day for the duel was then ap-
pointed, and all the gentry in the
vicinity assembled to witness the
chivalrous display. AS soon as the
gentlemen duellists appeared on the
ground, they made many demonstra-
tons of civility and good feeling
General Hornet, laying his claw on
his heart, declared in the most inter-
esting manner that he had not the
least feeling of ill-will toward his re-
spected opponent, and that whatever
might be the result of the present
encounter, he trusted that gentleman
would accept the homage of his high
consideration. Colonel Bundle Bee,
bowling in the most graceful manner,
made similar protestations. The Sec
onds then bowed to the company
around, shook hands with each other,
and then proceeded to mark out the
ground, while DR.. Grasshopper ar
ranged his surgical instruments and
bandages.
At the word of command the COM
batants engaged. The conflict was
truly awful. For long time victory
hung in suspense, At last it was
manifest that Colonel Bundle Bee
had received mortal wound, for he
ceased all efforts at defence. Imme-
diately General Hornet called to aid
DR.. Grasshopper, but it was soon
manifest that all such instrumental
ty was too late. General Hornet then
most tenderly inquired of his dying
antagonist, whether there was any
thing he could do that would afford
him any comfort or satisfaction The
Colonel raised his dying eyes, and
replied that he had but one wish to
express. "Let me hear it," said the
gallant general, land I will fly to the
farthest verge of the green earth,
rather than it should be unfulfilled."
The colonel then, in the most touch
ing manner, stated that he was dying
to vindicate the honor of the loveliest
of ladies, and as his antagonist now
stood in the place of the one who had
given the offence, he wished him in
the presence of the assembly to re-
tract what had been said. Certain
ly," exclaimed the general; "it is with
the greatest pleasure and satisfaction
l here declare that Miss Katy, when
she said she did, spoke simply and
only the truth" Upon this, Colonel
Bundle Bee turned upon one side,
and closing his eyes, exclaimed; II
die content" and Immediately ex-
pired.
The assembly then retired, over
whelmed with grief and admiration
at this interesting scene. The next
day, at the General Congress of
Bugs, it was unanimously voted to
attend Colonel Bundle Bees funeral,
and in testimony of their high res
pect for his memory. that each mem
Der should wear black string on the
left leg for thirty days.
For myself, l have ever since felt
very melancholy, and to while away
my leisure hours l have employed
myself in preparing this history of
my misfortune. Let me then con-
clude, by entreating all my young
friends to shun the fault, that they
may escape the misfortunes of their
sorrowful friend-Katy Did.