Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1895-04-24
THE COMING MAN.

Laterudy.
Each is arrayed in costume reversed
from the custom of their ancestors. The
wife wears an ultra style Of bloomers, with
vest, cutaway coat and black four-i in hand
middle. The husband is clothed in light
blue wrapper, fluffy sleeves, close cut beard
and long hair arranged la mode of the
latest French knot. They sit at the break
fast table, Susan reading the morning
paper, while John is slowly pouring out
the coffee, frowning and muttoring inco-
herent sentences as the right sleeve of his
morning gown falls accidentally into the
dark, Brazilian beverage before him. The
children, Mary and Willie, respectively 10
and IA years Of age, occupy seats on either
side of the table,
Johns mind wanders In retrospeotion
as with dolly he dries the moistened
sleeves. This Is the tenor of his thoughts:
Little did the fathers of 1895 conceive
that their posterity would think, act and
dress as they do today. Here am con-
tinual home body and haven't the oppor-
tunity of leaving my duties even for mo-
ment. The entire morning Is consumed
In caring for the children, getting them
ready for school, cleaning their faces and
hands, and above all plating little Will
lies hair which reaches to his waist-and
such lovely color Then it Is SO hard to
keep his dresses clean, more so than my
own, though am constantly In the kitch-
on, and darn the holes in his stockings.
''Alasl wish boys wore pants as they
did 100 wears ago. But then can't COM
plain, for he is so amiable and quiet. II
he were but like Mary and could dress as
she dresses, should have no trouble in
keeping him clean and respectable. Her
boomers are never soiled, her short, bar
Der cut hair SO easily brushed, and If she
were not so robust, rollicking and mis-
chievous 1 should dote on her. live in
constant dread that Willie may become
tom girlish' and Mary lose her head or a
limb while playing football or cricket. A
housekeepers life is indeed hard one.
At this juncture Susan lays aside the
paper, saying: This is miserable Stocks
and bonds are depreciating rapidly the
'goldbugs' of Wall street are riding rough
shod recklessly over all competitors and
monopolists are depressing private indus
tries with heels Of iron. docking up)-
John, dear, the coffee is very weak Why
don't you scold the cookf You know
haven't the time to overlook domestic af-
fairs, being absent from home all day
And the biscuits, dearest How different
from those my father used to make
(Sighing)-Poor me, shall have dyspep-
STA before another week is ended. Turn
ing to Mary)-Daughter, how do you like
your new bicycle9"
Mary-Oh, it is just too nice for any
thing and have outstripped every other
girl in the neighborhood racing round the
block. They are all envious of me- But
what do you think, mamma? Willie ask.
ed me yesterday to let him ride, and strad.
die at that willie bushes and covers his
face with his hands as he violently coughs.
The idea of my brother, q boy, wanting
to ride bicycle! 1t is ridiculous, INDIE
cent. What would the other girls sayf
Mother (almost unnerved by the disclo-
sure of Willie's desire)-I am astounded
that my son, Laterday, should SO far
have forgotten himself as to act in man
ner so unbecoming a little gentleman.
Be content, my child, with your dolls and
dresses. These are better suited to your
position.
Father (soothingly)-There, darling,
don't cry. Mother didn't intend to hurt
my little angels feelings. Susan, you
should deal more gently with the gentler
sex.
Mother--Hush, John. You are little
better than your son. Your head is as
soft as putty.
Tears come into Johns eyes. He and
Willie weep violently, while the mother
and daughter eat in silence, apparently
deploring the weakness of the male sex.
After the lapse of few moments John,
an ideal husband, believing his wife's criti-
cism to be just and proper, RECEIVERS a smile,
and Willie, replacing a fallen hairpin,
stuffs battercake in his mouth. At this
interval the maid, an Irishman, clad in
lavender skirt, green waist and leather
belt, enters, hands warm buckwheats
around, and with slight "ourtsy" exits.
Wife-John, prefer that you engage
German or an Englishman. The Hiber-
MAN, in my opinion, is not suited for
hia labors. Now, our butler, the French
girl, is exemplary, and none better could
be secured. By the by, John, while I
think of it, Lucy Harrison was inquiring
your age on yesterday.
John bursting into temper)-The idea!
course 1t Ia all right to ask yours, but
husbands age should be held sacred and
above the curiosity Of the vulgar.
Tears again steal into his eyes and
trickle noiselessly to his bread as he con-
templates this objectionable insult.
Breakfast over, Susan arises, calls for
overcoat and rubbers and turns to 60 out.
John Qnterrupting) -Wifey, desire to
do some shopping this morning. Please
give me $40.
Susan-Oh, John, John, you are very
extravaganza and will break me yet. I
think you might try to eoonomize during
these hard times.
John-But, Susan, you know my Co.'S
metics are out, and must have more be.
fore tonight, because don I care to make
a worse appearance than Mrs. B. g hus-
band. Besides, my pug Is unwell and
must have the immediate attention Of
skillful physician. But shall take Fido
in the carriage to DR.. Cure instead Of pay
ing extra for visit.
Susan-Very we'll, John. You shall
have it. You were always dear creature
-DO AAuu aAA VAOuSAVAuiS OuUy hW0ouuodEU,
do wear small bonnet to the theater this
evening. detest large hats, as do other
ladies, and be sure to put on your long
gloves, so as to conceal the horrid imprints
Of vaccination on your arm and don't re-
quire me to wait long time while pre-.
pairing your toilet. 1t Is SO annoying.
.John-All right, dear You. will find
me ready. Don't forget the opera tickets,
for am in such flutter to hear the new
charming soprano voice,
and he lie 90 handsome, native born Ital-
ian.
Susan-Go I'll remember.
Kisses him affectionately, lights Of.
gar, boards an electric car and is Of for
the troubles and cares Of commercial life.
John re-enters the house, hastens the
children to school, gives few directions
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