Birmingham age-herald., 1895-02-16
AS VIEWED BY A NOVICE.
Football Discussed From the Standpoint
 of One Not an Enthusiast.


 Modern football is in ono respect like baseball, in that it affords abundant facil- ities to kick on tho umpire, but otherwise it isn't liko anything else on earth. The young men who participate in the game are selected with great care, nobody being eligible who cannot withstand the kick of mule between the eyes or in the pit of tho stomach. Other requirements arc a luxuriant growth of hair, any color, and muscular tissue sufficient to meet freight train on the down grade and knock .it ef the track. The football is an ov.i, leather 1nclosed chunk of ot'cOspnere tho posses sion of whion seems to be q subject of conta.ual contention.
 Two corpulent youths, called the center rushes, take the ball between them, each being in a stooping posture, heads togeth- CT and legs very wide apart. The teams bunch up in the rear of their respective rushes, one of whom, at a given signal from his captain, snaps tho ball back be- tween his legs. A secret code of signals, called of by the captain, conveys the in formation not only when the ball is to be snapped, but also which player is to take 1t and attempt to get around or break through the line of the opposition. The trouble begins in the center of the field, between the goals, which are 330 feet apart. The referee sounds his whistle, the captain whose team has the ball calls off his jargon of numbers, and riot is forth with inaugurated.
 The unfortunate youth who has been selected to carry the ball makes break at the line of the enemy and Is at once bounced upon by the other 21 men and the referee, all of whom fall down on him 1,fll lox .l0 the referee, who Is provided with n cane for self defense, pokes around among tho. wriggling arms and legs, ascertains who has the ball and announces in a fine tenor voice so many yards lost or gained. The fellow who is on the bottom of the pile is brought around with artificial respiration, the teams line up, and the good work goes on. broken leg or fractured skull en- titles player to withdraw in favor of substitute Occasionally dispute arises over some technical point whereupon the partisans of tho respective sides flock around the disputants and howl for a rope 70 lynch the referee. It is entirely imma- .erial which way he decides. There is al ways throughout the game manifest dis position to kill him, and every mans hand is against him. Tho life of football referee is not happy one It is consider ed great joke to accidentally fall on him and shove No. 8 hob nailed shoe down his throat
 [ There arc a great many fine points about football. Ono of them is to pick out for slaughter the best player of the opposition. The methods of doing this are varied and unique. Tho point of an elbow applied to tho pit of a mans stomach when he is running at full speed has been found to be very effective. But it is useless to emu merate further The foregoing hint is sufficient. A touch down is made when one side succeeds in carrying the ball be- hind its goal. This counts four points. Aft CT the touch down the ball is carried out certain distance into the field, and the roy al arch kicker of the team attempts to send it over tho goal bar. If he succeeds, two additional points are secured.-Paris (Ills.) Beacon.