Staunton vindicator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1860-1896, 1895-02-22
MYSTERIOUS EYES,

COLONEL JaSSOu gave MS Ir1enQS ana
cronies terrible shock last week. The
colonel had celebrated the dying of the
old year in true Jagsonian style and
started for home when the infant 1895
was only three hours old, carrying a
load that was heavy even for SO expert
vehicle as the Jagson anatomy. Then
the surprise came. When the old boy
appeared later in the day and took his
usual seat alongside the old guard, a
tumbler of straight was at once
brought All the others raised their
glasses, murmured ftHappy New Year!'
sinking the last syllable into the glasses
as they quaffed the rare old brew, and
then looked at Jagson. There sat the
veteran, but his hand had not touched
the glass. Silently he reached forth, and
taking tumbler full of water he slow
~ drank. CONSERVATION but feebly ex-
presses the feelings of the old guard.
Jagson drinking water, and that, too,
on New Years day! What had hap
pened?
Eager inquiries brought no satisfac-
tion to anxious friends.
''No; I've not sworn of, +" said Jag
son.
"Never going to drink any more?"
asked the old guard in chorus.
IT may" replied the hero of many
tussle with old red eye.
"Sick?" again came from the chorus.
"No," came from between the colo
nel's tightly compressed lips, and with
a curt "Good dayp' he strobe majestic
ally from the cafe.
This action brought dismay. The old
guards ranks were already depleted.
Only four now rendezvoused daily, and
Jagson's detection meant more to the
survivors than can we'll be understood
by outsiders.
Nevertheless, despite all the efforts of
entreaty and solicitous inquiry, the colo
mel remained total abstainer. He came
daily to join his comrades to gossip and
swap stories, but never once did he be-
tray, by word or sign, the reason that
led him to abjure the wine when it was
red OR the bowl when it was flowing.
Thus affairs ran on. The Old Guard
was troubled, and Colonel Jagson look
ed worried and acted like man over
burdened with serious thought and
deep financial disorder. The fear that
Colonel Jagson was caught in the finan-
cial stringency induced General Soake
to take his wife into his confidence
With that tact and intuition that are
woman's chief charm she went at once
to call on Mrs. Jagson, and with the
usual result-she got the root Of the
trouble in short order. Mrs. Jagson was
positively radiant. The colonel was al
ways sober, the household allowance had
been increased, the table bore more deli
cacies Of the season, her wardrobe and
bonnets were new, and Mrs. Jagson be-
gan to think that the declining years of
her married state would be happier than
the earlier period.
''And how did it all come about?"
quoth Mrs. Soake. Now, Mrs. Jagson
knew that Mrs. Soake had suffered from
the same rivalry that she herself had
endured, and that soft pity to which
femininity is SO prone swept over her,
and she gave the cause of the reforma
tion away to her friend.
"You know, my dear Mrs. Soake, "
began Mrs. Jagson, "the colonel came
home just before daylight on New Years
morning and was not quite himself.
The conviviality had proved too much
for his equilibrium, but after much
fumbling he got the door opened and
came up stairs as softly as circumstances
would permit. Contrary to my usual
custom, had put the light in his room
entirely out. He seemed unable to find
a match and evidently tried to go to
bed in the dark Faint rumblings and
wild roar. I rushed in to find him on
the floor grasping at the carpet. When
the gas was lighted, he became quiet,
went to bed, and I left him in the dark
again.
IA second time he called and asked
me to sit with him in the light. did
SO until he fell asleep. The next morn
ing he felt that some explanation was
due, I suppose, and told me that bright
spots like twinkling eyes had peered at
him from the floor about the bed, and
when he tried to grab one nothing was
there You may be assured Colonel Jag
son was badly frightened at the effects
of his overindulgence, and from that
day to this he has not tasted liquor of
any kind
''But the explanation, my dear Mrs.
Jagson!" cried the excited Mrs. Soake.
"Well, you must keep it secret. If
the truth be found out, the colonel
might go back to drinking again. 1t
was this way: You see, I'd been having
the eolonel's room cleaned and fancied,
only fancied, you know. that the bed
might have some Of those little pests
lurking in the crevices, SO told tbs
girl to use phosphorus powder, and
she carelessly let some sift onto the car
pet Of course, in the dark it shone
bright, and that is all there is to the
eyes that haunted the colonel"
Just phosphorus bedbug powder!"
exclaimed the wife OF the old guards
man, who had not stopped slipping the
cheering bowl in more than 40 years
1tJust think of it! Broken from habit
of SO long time by % cents worth Of
bedbug poison! shall so and get some
Immediately.
Thus bubbling with eagesness the HI
tie woman rushed into the chill atmos-
phefe Of the outer world and into the
arms Of her dearest friend, Mrs. Major
Everfull. So the secret was told to one
more and was received again with rap
ture.
Things began to look sad for the old
guard. With these determined women
on the trail. and one man already in
captive chains, red eye bourbon and ap-
p,ejack were doomed. The next day.
when the group Of old timers were gath
cred for the morning nips, General
Soake said to the waiter:
'Guess I'll have some apollinaris
Don'S feel very well today
Jagson's ginger ale habit was q shock,
Seake falling y victim to the mineral
habit was a calamity, but when Major
Eyerfull calmly, but with culver in
his voice, said. "Vichy, please" the
bottom dropped out Of everything.
Everfull sighed and put his hand
YEARLY to his eyes, as though to blot