Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1895-05-16
OUR BUDGET OF FUN.
SAYINGS AND Do
INGS HERE AND THERE.
Jokes and Jokclcts that Are Supposed
to Have Been Recently Born-Sayings
and Doings that Are Odd, Curious and
Laughab1c-The Weeks EEm~r.
Let us All Laugh.

Let Us All Laugh. :.
We hear and read Of many u1en
Whose honor is like flint:
But know a man so honest
That he never took a hint.
Judge
She-So you Wouldn't take me to he
90 What would YOU take me for? He
For better or for worse.-Philadelphi
Record.
'Hullo, Patton! Haven't seen you
for three DAVIS" mo Went over to
Philadelphia day before yesterday and
spent a week. life.
Tommy-Pop. what is a popular
song? Tommy's father-One that
everybody gets sick and tired Of hear
Philadelphia Record.
Billy. the Goat-That manuscript
just ate has given me an awful pain
Nanny-Yes, dearest; that's called writ
ers' cramp.-Harpers Bazaar.
"How on earth did Smith become q
colonel?" Easy enough. Train wa
delayed in Georgia and he attended Il
picnic. ATLANTA Constitution.
Mr. DIFF you get my coat done By
Saturday l shall be forever indebted
to you. Tailor-If that is the case, it
won't be done.-New York Recorder.
Nell-If you really liked young mar,
what would you do if some day he
should kiss you suddenly, against your
will? Belle-He couldn' t.-Somerville
Journal.
Jingle-Here, you can take back this
dog you gave me. Dingle-Whats tt
matter with him? Jingle-He's eaten
his tag | can't afford to get him new
license.-I4ife.
The Tourist-You seem to be proud
of your family title. The New York
millionaire abroad proudly)-Of course
1 am. I paid for it in good hard dol
lars.-Chicago Record.
Mrs. Belletield-1rs. Oakland has a
great secret Mrs. Bloomfield-Oh, no!
She can't have! "WLy not?" eff she
had she would have told it to me-
Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
Nodd-Our nursegirl has just had a
terrible fit of sickness. Todd-YesE
What was the matter? MODIFY mis-
take she took some medicine she was
going to give the baby.-Judge.
Mrs. Hicks-How do you like this lit
tie theater toque? l made it all my
self Hicks-It isn't very big, is 1t!
Mrs. Hicks Moo; made it out of AN
old jet bracelet.-New York World.
made 1000 refusals of marriage. Dicer
That's easily explained. When young
CalloW asked her to marry him, she
replied: mo, q thousand times, nor'-
It'd Bits.
81 guess" said the sharp nosed girl
that l will take the wind out OF her
sails" why" asked the fluffy girl
"don't you be up to date and say take
the wind out of her tires ?'-Cincinnah
Tribune.
Hurrying Stranger Tin Squeekawketa
is there time to catch the trainf
Languid Native-Waal, stranger, ye-ve
got time enough, I reckon, but rm
dead sure We hain't got the speed
Harper's Bazaar.
Here's the latest thing in watches,7
said the dealer; "a warranted water
proof case II believe" said Nudge
that one that could be soaked would ba
better suited to my needs. "-Indianap-
oils Journal.
"Say, papa, if we were lying at the
center of the earth, wouldn't we be all
m Gu
my son?'' "'Cause this Biography says
everything there loses it's gravity
Brooklyn Life.
He-Don't you think there is consider
able danger in letting a woman whd
cares for you know that you love her9
She-I think there is considerable more
danger in letting her know that yoJ
don't-Harlem Life.
'The first time / heard that played
Miss Ethel, do you know, | was COM
pletely carried away" Indeed! Why
how delightful! II you'll sit nearer the
door, Mr.. Berthe, I'll play it oref
again. "-Harper's Bazaar.
A bond Of sympathy: Mrs. Hicks
This paper tells about a hunting dog
that has formed strange attachment
for all old hen. How do you accoant
for that? Mr.. Sport-Probably they
are both setters.-Truth.
''How do you like your new teacher
Willie?' "I'm afraid of her, mamma
She's so awfully swell 'Does she
dress very stylishly?" docs she7
Mamma, she could put you in either
one of her sleevesr'-C Chicago Tribune.
do any of you women believe in adj
vanced women?' shouted the car con-
ductor, putting his head in 1T the car
door YES, we do replied q woman
holding on to a strap. "WeI, them