The Wadsworth dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1892-1899, 1895-07-20
HIS HOPE BLIGHTED.
LOVE AND FIREWORKS ON THE
FOURTH OF JULY.

How a Lighted Cigarette Brought Disaster
on a Victim of the Tender ~Passion--Fair.
but False. Alasi Was the Object Of His
Devotional Tale of Misfortune.
My cousin Amy lives at Bryn Mawr
and is IA beauty. A few days ago |
Rdored her, but now l know her TO be the
ialsest of her tickle gender, can only
lie here in bed and groan and vow venRe-
ance upon the head of my successful
rival.
Sunday before the Fourth | went to
Bryn Mawr, and when | came away
Amy said. oh. SO sweetly, Now do be
sure and come out Tuesday and bring
some fireworks,
! have always hated fireworks and
firmly believe that if Dante had -four
ished in the days and ways of this our
noble empire he would have devoted
one more corner of his Inferno" to
damned souls doomed to shoot gigantic
f~rccrackers forever in each Others black
ened faces. But it was Amy's request,
SO ! spent more money than was healthy
for even a sound financial condition
and sent to Bryn Mawr two large cases,
full Of assorted fireworks, which were
placed for safety's sake III a little sum
mer pavilion until | should arrive and
nnpack them.
Amy wasn't in when | arrived on the
evening OF the Fourth, so l took a hatch
ct and went to riie summer house. lit II
cigarette and proceeded to open the
cases. Most Of the stuff was strewn
around me when / heard voices outside,
| couldn't see their owners, for the sum
lner house is completely screened by lat
tice work and climbing vines, but l rec
ognized them rs those of Amy and Jack
Armstrong. ! never did like that fellow
He has "a trick of slapping you on the
back if you say anything good that
makes you quake all over, and this, |
say with dif1idence, happened only too
frequently in my case, and then he has
a deep growl of "a voice that browns
yours out in conversation. 1t was he
speaking.
$50 we're going to have fireworks by
the funny little cousin. by heavens,
he meant meb | suppose after each
ROGET and roman candle he'll explode,
too-not go off, worse luck-with one
of those confounded pedantic remarks
of his. He's the most pompous little pop
gun l ever saw.
did you ever notice his walk" he
continued. Its like this. Icouldn't
see what he did, but Amy went Tee
hee-heel Jack, you have no right to
talk Of my relatives that way, at least
until we are married. Then there was
a sound like the ''cheep' of a bird sew
eral times repeated. The miscreant was
kissing herl
What ! heard made my half smoked
cigarette fall from my dropping lips
among the fireworks as l stood palsied,
nerveless at the awful fact that Amy,
my Amy, lovely, perfidious, tickle,
heartless, cruel Amy, was to wed a man
who called me a ''pompous little pop
gum" l determined to destroy this crea-
ture who crossed me, to poison his life,
pulverize his prospects-to blast him.
Just her there was a hiss at my feet,
followed by a pop, then q sound as of
ali angered anaconda and a whole vol
ley of pops, ending with a bang that
half stunned me and filled the place
with smoke.
~Bewildered, instead of making my
escape through the door / sprang up
one Of the side screens, which had a
semicircular opening at the top, just
under the caves, and seated myself on
the rail at the bottom, preparatory to
swinging my legs over and dropping
safely outside.
But instead, when l raised upon my
hands to lift myself over, somehow
for | am not an athlete slipped, and
instead of falling to the ground an N
used hammock hook caught in my rear
ward clothing, somewhere i'll the region
of my waistband, and held me securely
suspended, struggle as did to free my
self. | had no purchase for nay feet and
10 hold fJr my bands. | falt for my
penknife to cut loose with, but that lay