The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1895-03-14

too good friends, each KNOWN t1Iv
other Is a good-lOoker, an so hntins
her cheerful, as women is due to do. !.
Mr.. Chairman says the English
man, desire to. call yore attention
to the fact that the lady acrost the
table Is eatin' Of potawtoes with her
knife
We'll, what Of that?' says Strrmpy
Wdcks, who is Carries escort. How
ever does anybody eat pertatoes if it
amt with knifeT
AT this the applause is agin general,
an Judge Talbot, though lookin' a
little troubled, says: Objection over
ruled: knives goes "..-, :
''This rifles the Englishman, an he
jumps UP. "
"'What kind Of a bloomin' country
is this yere I finds? says he. The
bloody lot Of We cawn't ave 'ad any
breedin' at all. What do these fellahs
know Of 1t, must say! Just fawncy,
me short-legged friend says a lady
should eat potawtoes with her knife!
It's 'orrible, pom me word, it's 'orri-
ble.'
"Now, Stumpy Wicks Is plenty
touchy bout his len tn, an when this
yere fool English1nan calls him a short
legged friend he gifts mad, an 'thout
maxim no great stir about it he pulls
his gun an is due TO shoot a hole
through the Englishlnan Immediate
But the kermittee cams him down,
and smooths things out onct more, and
sends Hank Cooper's wife out to get
Hank Cooper to come and take the
Englishman home, along Of his pres
ence bein' 50 irritatin' to Stumpy.
well, the contest goes on, an the
judges they watches the style an ac-
ton o. each couple an begins to grade
'em out. They has leanin' evident
fer Tom N1cGinnis an Mabel Mandel-
baum, fer though Tom amt got much
style hisself this yere Mabel is a clean
cut lady from away back. This don't
suit Bug Tolliver, who sets it up he's
due to win this yere event hisself,
him an Pegleg.
II must say Pegleg does pretty we'll
She sits quiet through it all an tends
to her knittin' constant, not skippln'
a step in her enjoyin' Of the best
American meal she ever eats in all
her life. But Pegleg is Mexican after
all, an no Mexican OH earth is good
people. notice sever'l a-lookin' over
at Pegleg, an bimeby l hears a sort
Of laugh. an blame me, if there amt
Pegleg a-eatin' her potatoes with her
fingers!
Whatever can some folks mean a.
bringin' in Mexicans amongst high
toned society, I wondersn whispers
Tom McGinnis, pretty loud.
"'1 wishes to remark says Bug Toll
liver, careless like, to nobody in par
ti"ular, that whoever criticises Peg
leg tonight is criticism of me-.
ST shore hates to cross yore sign
says Tom McGirnis, sarcastic, but
people in high life amt mixin' usual
with greasers, specially greasers as so
far fergits themselves as to eat their
vlttels with their tiugers.'
AT this both men begin to shoot,
an both bein' handy, it amt long till
both gifts hurt and lays down.
"Of course, both men has friends.
and this yere seems SO much like old
times that we all gifts sort Of excited
an fergits our surroundings, an turns
loose all around, an the contest in eti-
cute ends right yere, along Of the coup
les bein' broke up SO much.
''They amt but three Of us comes
out any good at albert Massey, Shor-
ty Wicks, an me, an I'm shy sever'l
teeth an finger that lose that night,
though I amt mindin' it much at the
time. The one-eyed Weems girl gifts
shot in the back hair an everybody
is hit some, or scared a whole lot.
Maj. Truman he calls the remnants
of the contest to order an he makes
a few remarks.
"'It was the intention O. the kermit
tee, my friends said he, to call this
we're contest draw between Mr.. Nc
ginnis and Mr.. Tolliyer, with their
respective pardners. I regrets to state
however, that both Mr.. McGinnis an
Mr.. Tolllver is horse dc combat. Miss
Mabel Mandelbaum is not now present
with us, having jumped the hail. an
Pegleg is unfortunate hit in the on'y
good leg she has left. The Lord hath
give, the Lord hath took away. Things
bein' as they is the kermittee feels
forced to say that they are unable to
render a decision, an feelin' you all
needs little rest at this late hour we
adjourns this contest sine de-
well, that's all they do to it. They
can't nobody blame the kermittee,
though the contest is what you might
call a practical failure. It's q good
idee all right, but we springs it Il lit
tie too soon. The wave of culcher is
bound to reach the Pecos valley before
"a a Gi u -