New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1895-07-18
THE TALK or TIE DAY.

First Cynic-Th.s fancied distinction between .
statesman and a politician Is all nonsense
Second Cynic-Oh no. 1t isn't; statesman II
man who deceives everybody but himself wnen no
lies, while a politician Is man who oece'Ves No
body but himself
At a observation-disclosures" said the teacner 20
but you shouldn't give up so easily you '"0u'' Dc
S Il CANT replied Willie, in disco nns;s.r
Everybody says ! don't take ai'er '''o'"'''
washington Star.
THE Buffalo Courier" describes the burning o.
the steamer Cibola. Of the Lewiston and Toronto
line as a 'rurid sensation" AS 'lurid' means wan
gloomy dismal 1t Is a little hard to see how the
adjective applies to blazing boat.
IT'S COMING.
Here's a modest haelujah, for the good sooo
When the poet won't annoy you with his sad mad
When the man who wants exchanges will cease ia
And xili only stay a minute and politely shut tho
That much desired day;
The world IL getting near It,
And we're happy on the way!
Here's a modest halleiujah for the good, good
When we'll spend hundred dollars like We would
When every pathway'il blossom with violet and
And the debtorH hunt the creator 10 pay 'ne o'l'
he owes!
That much desired day;
The world is getting near IT,
And we're happy on the way. ....,
THE Chicago Times-Herald" offers prize Of
s. 900 and gold medal for the best horse,ess car
rage propelled by electricity any other mechani-
cal agency. to be determined by public competition.
Tho ,o,ost charoa brought against the bicycle
Is that it Injuries the booksellers trade Books
never have the same sale IN novels sre IN
demand by the loungers on the seashore; Dut tns
y yfs.so 5ners Is ra sia The is
this it is logically argued that %ni nossbv bs
reading book, and that when he gets home from
his spin he is too tired TO read; AS . sme eychns
growth upon literature would make an interesting
study.-(Phiadephia Record.
1t appears that the comparatively rev losses 70
the Japanese troops In the Manchurian engage
ments In the recent war with China were not al
together due the bad craftsmanship OF tho chi
ncse As means OF protection against the cold
the Japanese wore a quantity Of floss silk under
their outer clothing, and this acted more or less
as a bullet proof shield
He-Carrie do you know. darling, that you are
the only girl / ever 49,. u al, =,
He-But hear me out. You are. the only girl. I
that ever thought was 1901 eHouBH u nave
Charley think you may buy that ring as soon az
you lke.-tBoston Transcript
LIBERALIZATION" Is a word added 10 the
language told in a story by Senator Palmer about
an Illinois farmer who for several years had been
selling him wood for 81 a cord This year, says
Senator Palmer "he came to me with load ana
I told him did want It. He offered 1t at
g a cord. | still refused. and he wanted 10 know
why would not take 1t at s.. ] told him was
using soft coal for which | paid 81 81 a ton.
Gosh" ne exclaimed. Il heard you was trying
to demonet.ze silver. but now you're trying
defuelize wood"
Two Corporations Clash.-"Ths bill, protested
the man at the window, calls for 81 "a for gas
burned In June and there wasn't anybody IN the
house during the entire month. to my certain
knowledge" 80.
THE meter tells a different story. SIR, replied
the cashier at the gas companys ONCE, and We
have to go by the meter 81 81 is right"
We'll. I'll pay H., said the other taking out
his pocketbook with great apparent reluctance.
bill for last February, amounting TO 81 % We
have called your attention IL several times but
you have always refused TO pay 1t on the ground
that you did know any Ice was left at your
door during that month and you didn't need H.
1t wasn't fault II you didn't know H. mo
books show that the ice was left there. and We
have TO go By books. The difference Is 30 cents.
and N you Will just hand over the amount
Here they clinchei-(Chlcago Tribune