River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-01-03
a WONDERFUL GOBBLER.



Drowning After Death.
''Talkin' about turkeys" observed
the farmer to the produce man the 9th
err day, I'VE raised one year ago that
probably never had his equal in size
and weight in the history of the world. "
The produce man looked incredulous,
but the farmer went on without MOTTO
ing it:
when the turkey was Matched he
was no bigger than the rest of the
brood, but two days later he weighed
five pounds and was sprouting tail
feathers. The end of the first week
out of the she'll saw him full fiedged
bird of a trifie more than ten pounds,
and still he grew"
The produce man smiled indulgently,
echoing the farmers words:
And still he grew"
''Yes, Stree; l never saw anything
like it. He was two weeks old on the
day when he tipped the beam at thirty
five pounds. and he only seemed to
have fairly started, for"
"Yes, know slowly observed the
produce man, for still he grew"
Screw? well, should say so! A
week later he had put up another fif-
teen pounds without impairin' his ac-
tivity or seemin' TO mind it in the
least He picked up his corn as lively
as ever, and still ne grew"
There was a sickly smile on the
produce mans face, but he made nore-
mark.
I'VE began to wonder where it was
coin' to stop" went on the farmer,
''for about this time his appetite, which
had always been extraordinary, began
to pick up at an alarmin' rate, and we
knew he'd just about got his second
wind, which meant putin on weight
more rapidly than ever. 1t took him
just ten days to put up another TWEEN
ty-five pounds"
THAT makes seventy-fve," gasped
the produce man.
"Kerrect. and still he grew"
And still he grew" sighed the pro-
duce man.
Il suppose he was something like
eight weeks old when he reached the
one hundred pound mark and quit
walking about" continued the farmer.
But he still grew?" anxiously put in
the produce man.
'Never let up for minute" was the
assuring reply. I'VE became a little
anxious about him at this time, on ac-
count of the henhouse, which we could
see would soon be too small for him to
stand up in. Finally, we decided to
transfer him to the barn, but we had
been a little slow in coming to the de-
cision, for when we came to remove
him he had grown too big to go through
the henhouse door, and we had to take
out the whole front of the building to
accommodate his size"
And still he grew" ventured the
produce man in 4 weak voice, and with
very painful attempt at smile.
Yes, he had more room to spread
out in the barn, and went on CROWN
faster than ever. Very soon it became
question as to how long the barn
would last him. and then we decided
to kill him. That, as you'll easily
guess, was no small task, but we did it
Just felled him with poleaX as you
would an OK, and we managed TO give
him his death blow at the third
stroke"
And still he grew" absent-mindedly
murmured the produce man.
Grew nothin', 7" retorted the farmer,
Indignantly. Ibid you expect him to
go on CROWN forever"
''Oh, | don't know" ans vered the
other, somewhat recovering his spirits;
stranger things than that happened
to the turxey.if l have not been dream
ing. Chicago Times.
A CLASS in grammar was reciting, and one
of the younger boys was asked to compare