The broad ax. [volume] (Salt Lake City, Utah) 1895-19??, 1895-11-23
TOM AND 1.


the first glow of passion for me he was the
most sensitive lover any girl ever had. Not
Jealous and selfish as many lovers are, but
proper and punctilious In his bearing to-
ward me, and allowing nothing from me
that wore the slightest appearance Of in
difference or neglect.
Tom and were sweethearts and engag-
ed. Why we never married viii tell you
also. Perhaps you would not have been
interested 81 this story from the start had
told you I am q spinster at whom men
no longer look Yes, have lost the laurel
wreath of youth and beauty, and conse-
uuently have no friends among the other
sax. am a spinster, loveless and lonely,
and do not know in all the world where
Tom is, If indeed he be In the world at all.
IT'S strange that I can control my heart
to speak of all my woe and disappointment
and would not were 1t not that others
may profit by the warning this love tale
will convey.
When we had BEEN engaged about six
months, Tom went away to live In another
city with the hope Of making more money
before asking me to leave my fathers
home. In which lived life Of ease and
luxury. At first we wrote to each other
Syery day, but of course that grew tire
some at the end Of q few weeks and by
mutual consent we limited our letters to
two a week.
Now 1t was generally acknowledged
that was pretty and attractive girl and
certainly it was not my fault-either the
opinion or the fact. And ] was not to
blame either that as soon as Tom left 1t
got out that we were no longer engaged.
This brought other suitors about me. !
was modest and did not stand on the street
corners or climb to the housetops and
shout: "I am engaged 10 Toni Don't
look at me or speak to meP' My love and
betrothal were 30 sacred to me ! never felt
inclined to discuss them with the world.
Moreover, my nature was human nature,
Rirl nature at that, and could not for the
life of me feel offended when men admired
me and asked my hand and heart. One Of
the hardest things a woman Is ever called
on to do Is to turn her back on admiration
and conquest. They seem essentially q
part Of her existence and mission. God
has given her a queenship; to abdicate her
throne is renunciation not to be asked nor
expected.
Now, evil has many agents and ennis
saries in this world, and they serve with
willing hearts and prompt action. There
fore it was not long until 1 got a letter
from Tom telling of his great anxiety CO.
casioned by the reports which had reached
him of my interest In other men. He said
he had strong reasons for believing that I
was tired of him. Unfortunately for sew
eral weeks before the receipt Of this letter
had been Frustrated with an unyielding
cold, and on two dates had not written to
Tom Just on time. Putting this and that
L. . h. av.l 1&o
Is have described. replied promptly to
his letter, denying that there was any one
in all the world beside himself to whom
gave thought. poured out many sweet
things In that letter, which / would not
be willing TO repeat here. had the right
Of course to utter my whole heart to Tom,
and tried to make him believe how i'm
possible ID was that i could be untrue to
him.
Iwaited anxiously for the answer to this
afectionate letter, feeling much pain In
my own heart to think had caused Tom
suffering. When q week passed and no
letter came from him, wrote again, tell
ing him Of my former letter and begging
an immediate response with assurance
that he still loved and trusted me. This
was the sweetest, most pleading letter
Tom ever got from me, and then waited.
Alasi am waiting still, though 20 years
have fed. heard through the papers that
Tom engaged for service with rich trad
ing company and had gone away to India,
and that was the last / ever knew Of him.
Igrieved and wept and prayed That Is
all a woman can do. What could have
taken Tom away from mel Just those
silly, idle rumorsf That could not be, for
my letters oontradicted them all, and Ger
tainly Tom knew would not tell lie
i will not dwell on the anguish Of that
year and Of all the years that have fol-
lowed People might ssy, as they often
do. THAI woman II weak and foolish to
love man after be has been false and
shown himself unworthy. Tom was nei-
ther false nor unworthy.
From the moment that this great sor-
row fall across my life believed that he
had . reason for his mysterious silence and
action, and that some day Il would be
made clear. Il has been. -
o
Elzs ysars had pssDsf siBps thst tszihis
pain entered my hart and from q happy,
merry eirl had ssttlsd down Into nd
faasd, thepghtful woDzn. who oarsd no