The Cecil Whig. [volume] (Elkton, Md.) 1841-current, 1895-11-16
i HE MARYLAND CRASH WAS
TOO MUCH FOR HIM.


Maryland haZ gone Republican,
l had just slept up to the bar, and wuz
pourin' out my mornin appetizer, when the
sot the bottle down and stared strate at
him.
SEE 1: "Wesley, you startled me for a
moment. Don't allow yoorself to trihe
with SIGH serious things agn."
81 haint a-trihen'," seq he.
SEE 1: 'Such thing haint possible.
Old Maryland is the Gibraltar of Democ-
racy.'
SEE he: 'Shc me be -. | don't know
what that IL, but she's gone Republican,
jest the same
straitenin' myself up, I seq: "Do you
take me fer fool?'
"Well eff yer take me fer a liar" sez he,
''jest cast yoor eyes on that"
1t wuz the mornin' paper. saw at
glance that he wuz tellin' the trooth, and
fer a moment everything swum before my
eyes gulpcd down that glass Of Ticker,
and fell limb and lfcless onto a cher
"Gone Republican," | gasped. "Oh!
thees degencrt timrs-thrcs DAYS when
you can't tie to nothn. Why, | wood Jest
az soon ookt fer religious revival in per
dition. az Republican victory in Mary
land. And Kentucky, and Moo Gersey
have turned fools, too. | Good stand that
but Maryland-shc wuz our pride, and our
pride, and our goy.'
never had rnnything to so prOstrait me.
berried my face in my hadkcicher and
shed scaldn' teers. Sush teeIs az Nioby
mite have shed, when all wuz lost to her
tibet made life brarahle; az Cleopatry mite
have shed, when her beloved Egypt felt the
ltOman grasp: as the unhcnding ANTON
cite nit" have shed, when She beheld the
splendors of Versailles die out, like sum
display at pyrochny. In the midst of my
greet | felt a jentle fetch on my shoulder
and, lookin' up, beheld Wesley standin'
by me.
what IL it, Wesly 2" groaned
Take sumthing," sed he, holdin' out
the bottle The simple words, but they
reused me from my bitter anguish.
grasped the bottle, and nervissly poured
out Il diam. 1t done me good. But fer
the consolation that Ticker brings to the
crusht and bleedin heart, | RELY b'leeve I
shood have collapsed rite thare. Thank
heaving, thare IL an antidote fer all our
ills
Wesley saw wuz calm now, so he ven
turned question. Sez he: "What do
you think of it, cnnyhow?'
Sez |: "Wesley. thecs are turrihle
times. My opinyum IL that this old world
: can't stand much more strain than she IL
standin. BctwiXt YOU and me, | b'ecvc
the end of the world haint menny centuries
off. Look around you. Everything IL in
state of fermentation. The Iooninted
States IL a seethin volcany, full of all
kinds of isms, whose direct tendency IL
toward anarky. Look abroad. The Old
World IL demoralizcd. England IL losing
her grip; the throne of the Sultan IL about
to topple: Spain IL giviu' vent to savage
cruelty upon poor, defenceess Cuba; China
il droppin to peeces, like sum rotten
fabric; Germany IL not so sure her position,
shood Russia treaten her: the South Ameri-
can states are reddy to slop over at emmy
moment, shood sumbody shake the bucket
And moren all this, tare are earthquakes
and shudders, az if it meant the approach
of doom. Aand stranger still, the people
of old Mars throw out THAR signal to this
world. Who knows but tbs "A warnin to
prepare. And to cap the climacks Mary
land leeves the Dimocratic fold Things
are badly out OF iint Wesley
While | wuz thus moIalizin' and giyin'
vent to my feclins' | heerd the strains Of
an old, familyur song. Away up the street.
sumbody wus singin: maryland My
Maryland" That old toon, filled with so
menny fond recollections; so menny sad
memories. Yet, so sole-inspirin' As the
singer drew neercr, | leened forard to ketch
every word. Instead of the old worlds
( tHtCS btOhe lliiSHlN vi my
Rejoice, Dmocracy IL dead
Maryland, My Maryland;
The Gormanite now hides hiz head,
Maryland, My Maryland;
No longer now you're forced to feel
Dimocracy's life-crushing heel,
Ioor sons have heard your firm appeal,
Maryland, My Maryland.
You've long endured tn oppressor's rong
Maryland, My Maryland;
But now you sing the new, new song,
Maryland, My Maryland;
, The sun haz riz upon thy shore.
1t floods the landscape DER and Ger;
1t gilds the syires of Baltimore,
Maryland, My Maryland
This wuz more'n | Good stand.
"Oblivion,' yelled, "cum and let thy
cold waters roll over this tIoubled brain. !"
reeched out my hand. Wesley placed
the bottle therein. | drained it to the
dregs and sank back in my cher The last
thing | heerd, az | Hoated out upon the
sea OF forgitfulness wuz this: "Maryl land 5
verdict today IL with five hundred votes to
the Republicans Of Delaware"
Then all wuz blank.