Birmingham age-herald., 1895-07-14

or it we caught as we leaned over ms shoulder:
 70, winsome maid with starlit eyes,
 You've won my heart, 10 my surprise; For it never did before by anybody
 He has kept himself clean all this week, and goes around the office looking as though the home team had been beaten by d score of 16 to l. If this thing keeps up either he or Simple John will have to clear out as the Cyclone has no use for two obituary editors.
 Simple John went out to Dead Head cemetery for inspiration last Sunday af- ternoon. and here is the result:
 In the old grave yard out there ill the
 woods,
 Not more'n mile from here.
 There's lots of the boys slcepin' away.
 And nobody seems to care.
 There ain't no flowers upon their graves,
 Or stones with their names above, 'em. Tho there may be some in the land
 That used to know an love en-
 Perhaps when they wus little kids
 Around their mothers knee,
 They wus kind Q good-not tough an bad,
 As they afterwards growed 10 be.
 An though the most of 'em died in bar
 While filled to the neck with flicker,
 An the world was better off perhaps,
 When their life flame ceased 10 flicker. Let's forget the fact that they wus tough,
 
 For the sake of the time when thcy Wus
 kids.
 For the sake of those that loved 'em.
 Last Tuesday evening we mounted old Dobbs and started out to call upon Miss Mariah Squash. She lives seven miles from Bungtown, on the lonely road that twists and turns between here and Death Hollow: but distance and lonely roads cut no ice with the young heart fired with it's first love- and we went merrly on our tourney While travelling the first four miles the moon peeped out through the gathering clouds, giving gloomy, graveyard sort of a light, but just as we were entering Skeleton Pass the moon sneased down behind an inky cloud and we were left in darkness. On we went, entering the pass where the trees meet overhead and form an arch of such dense growth that only now and then could glimpse be caught of the moisture laden clouds which now threatened to let their contents down on our unprotected per son. We had not reached the middle of the pass when there came a binding flash of lightning and crash as if the world were being split In twain. A mo- ments silence; then from behind a stump came the click-clck of gunlock. while a stern voice called out. "Hands upn We immediately complied with this order. and while waiting for further instruc- tions took a mental inventory of our val uabes. In our left vest pocket was ( 1adian 1O-cent piece; in the right pocll- (, of our trousers we had' one 5-cent nickle, two 1-cent coppers and l-cent stamp. That was what we were prepared to hand over when requested to do so. Again the voice floated out from behind the stump, "Whar are you gon'?' "To Death Hollow" we said. T spose you had no idea uV stoppin at old Squashs on your way over, an sparkin' his daurter?',
 Well" we replied, I've did think of dropping in and exchanging few civili- ties.''
 Wal. pard if you take my advice you will turn yer old nag's head back awards Bungtown. This is mighty dangerous road ct night, and people hez been knowed ter git lost" You don't mean to say that you Will prevent our passing on. do your we in- You guessed it furst time, pard You don't go out ter talk love ter my gal this night: not ef this old gun shoot" But" we said, Miss Mariah is pot engaged to you therefore you have no right to attempt to keep other suitors away from her house."
 The voice of the stump speaker was full of grim determination as he replied: Let me tell you somethin. feller. I've been goin' with that thar gal for nigh on to five year. I've tuck her ter every fai' and circus thet's been held in these parts I've bought her all kinds nv red lemmer- made an, pop corn, to say nuthin or the gold opera chain I give her. what cost dollar and two bits. Now. in the race nv these facts, if yer think I m goin ter | let one of you city fellers with clean ehurt on, little dab of flurida water on | the lnppel of yer coat. and yer pockets | full uv parchcd goobers, cum over here | to try an win my Marlah frum me, | your maxim an awfH. mistake. and, as | I said before, you'd better turn roun' an git" A We got but didn't reach Rungtown be- | fore the clouds burst. giving us com plete drenching.
 Miss ArabeIla Fits Van Spoodle walked f-clowly along the daisy strewn path tna' ,1s .srolsb tbe beautiful Valley of Mis- fortune She-osas reading a gilt edged volume of "Browfing. but occasionany allowed her star-like eyes fossssas ,,,,n a,u,i, the fascinating pages and radiate asS.ad a little yellow '.purp" which follows. close in her wake: The little dog had graceful curl in his skinny tail. and blue ribbon round his neck, and twas evident that Miss Arabella Fitts Van Spoodle thought more of him than of the young man who supplied her with bon bons. Unfortunately for her, she be- came so absorbed in the volume-prob- ably having reached that intensely inter- esting point where the villain Is about to bite the dust-as to give no notice to a gigantic eagle which lowered with hun gry eyes above the little animal of the spiral tail and blue ribbon. Suddenly a sad, despairing, pitiful yelp rang out clearly upon the scented air and Miss Arabella Fitts Van Spoodle looked around in time to see her pet borne sky bird. Higher and higher the bird flew, never stacking it's speed untl 1t reached