davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The evening times., 1895-10-18

Lest some reader should think this state
ment of relations visionary, one case of
such practical intimacy may be cited. Har-
ward University lies, about a mile from a
considerable working class; population:
and three years ago few students of the
university undertook to meet some young
young woEbingmen scholars of Cambridge
port, and give to them, as scholars, the in
struction which they, the students, had
Just. received. They transmitted, that is
to say, the university courses, the student
now becoming. teacher, and handing on. the
knowledge freshly acquired.
From this modest beginning has grown a
workingman's college, with a faculty Of
eighty student teachers, and membership
roll of from 700 to 800 workingmen 1t is
beautiful thing to find in these classes
youths of lltAarions training happily and
heartily at work with men from the COM
positor's desk or the. carpenters bench.
Both teachers and scholars are learning
pluch more than the lessons assigned They
are coming to understand each other.
The college. boy is learning that there are
other ways of education than his. and the
hand worker is. learning that many a. we'll
dressed youth is neither a fool nor a snOb.
They meet to study the,elcments of mathe-
natics or French, but they are learning to-
gether the doctrine of the organic life Of
man.
The evening times., 1895-10-18
imMf III uE sfIoaL -la0E
CarisBe Ezanpss d Wit alf VsdaR IN
The Sayings o. Htlb Ones
More Shrewdness and Philosophy
Than Are Sometimes, Eoundsin
More. Mature Minds

The schoolroom of early days was grim
In character and restricted in quantity. The
boy was. excusable who called his poem
on the departed teacher 1.-The Loss of a
Whaler. :"
Probably the best story ofgenuine humor
associated Will, the rod is. that told of the
boy whose master, hearing noise behind
him, turned suddenly, and, seizing the
boy whom he suspected. proceeded, 10
give him a severe whipping. The more
vigorously. the blows were administered
, the more heartily the boy laughed AT
length the irritated master shouted,
What are you laughing at, sir?'' II
was laughing at the joke on. you. Ha! ba.
ha! you're whipping the wrong boy"
1t might naturally be supposed that,
next TO the physical affhotion peri0ds,
the most uHlikeiy- time for humor TO GENE
into school would be during the religious
exercises. The natural seriousness OF
these exercises is sometimes disi iurbed,
however.
The evening times., 1895-10-18

Rejected mnnuxcripts are usually
returned when accomplished by
stamps, but any obligation to do 80
Is expressly disavOwed.
Manuscripts suImccompanied by post
. age Will not be returned.
The evening times., 1895-10-18

Subscribers to "Tbe Times" VIII
confer favor by promptly reporting
any dtscOurtesy Of collectors or neg
!ecl of duty on the part Of carriers
Complaints either by mail or In per-
son will receive prompt attention.
The Morning Edition should be de-
liyered ta all parts of ( he city lay $50
o'c,uck a.. M, including Sunday. The
Evening Edition should be in the
hands OF Subscribers not later than
ESQ p. IN.
The evening times., 1895-10-18

The words His Satanic Ma jesty'' &C.
cured in the story read in one OF the To-
ronto public schools. How many know
who his satanic ma jest yis?" said the teacher.
Several hands were raised, and the first
pupil named promptly replied, THE in
spector.''
When hygiene was taught in the form Of
notes dictated by the teacher, to be re-
peated orally by the pupil, or written down
to be committed TO memory, the answers
given in this subject were often very anus
ing. A young temperance advocate wrote
Alcoholic beverages greatly obst ruct
the breaking down of the body and sue
cee,led i'm saying exactly the opposite to
what he meant.
constructive anatcmist volunteered
the sentence: The eyes are set in TWO sock
cts in a bone which turns up at the end.
and then becomes the nose" One of the
large class that ventures to give gen
eral remarks at an examination as
substitute for accurate knowledge wisely
wrote the philosophical statement, The
spine IS quite an important bone" An
other gave the equally profound answer.
when you have an illness it makes
your health bad. as well as having a dis
ease.'' The girl who wrote the following
had doubtless associated with very selfish
people: THE body is composed chiefly of
water, and nearly one half OF il is ava
ricious tissue"
The evening times., 1895-10-18

Among all the extraordinary changes of
the modern life, its new inventions and
processes, its cheapeting of necessities and
its multiplication of Injuries, its transition
from the age of steam to the. age Of
electricity, there is. after all, nothing
of such significance or permanent effect as
this change in philosophy fr"m the self
centered to the organic creed. It has given
a new motive and scope tn economic study;
it has practically re-created ethics; it gives
new meaning to the Christian religion.
and it is Ma king a. new. kind OF college
man. The coIleseman of tbeDas WAS given
to selfculture for its own, sake, and eX-
pectcd his education TO separate him s"me-
what from the common lot of the world.
The evening times., 1895-10-18

WHO made you?' asked the. primary
teacher The little girl addressed, evil
IDENTIFY wished to be accurate in her reply:
God made me SO long"-indit ating the
length of short baby-'andI grow cd the
rest
The word altar occurred in the scripture
selection what is an aliar?'' said the
teacher. "a place TO burn insects" re-
piled an honest boy '.who " ere the folo.sh
virgins" brought the answer from a lit
tie girl, Them as didn't get married.
The evening times., 1895-10-18

IF anything were needed to prove the alb
solute stupidity Of the Simultaneous repe-
titiOD by the class OF oral statements made
by the tcacber as 4 substitute for toaclang
the following should be conclusive: A
word with whose meaning. the child is not
definitely acquainted is merely a new
noise to il. Even if it is familiar with. the
meaning of tho language it is often liable
to cenfounf the words used with Others
similar in sound. "Juhn. give, an exa-aple
of q nvuB." said the teacher, aud John,
after meditation, gave ''organ-grinder. -
"whyg' because he is a person plays a
thing" Queen Mary married the Dol
pbin." Mrs. Browning. wrote poetry to
the Pottery geese" This was not compli-
mentary to the Portuguese nor to the
teachers method of teaching literature.
1.-The organs of digestion are the stomach
liver, spleen, and utensils" "The heart
is a comical shape bag" 1.-The blood is
purified in the lungs by inspired air.
The evening times., 1895-10-18

A fuw answers relating to other Sub,
jects will close my examination depart
ment." Prose tells things that are true
right along just as they are aud poetry
makes it up as You go along" "A cincle
is a round straight line with n hole in
the middle" Things which are equal
to each other are equal to. anything else
THE chief products of the United States
is earthquakes and volca noes.''-
''The rapids of the ST L0rrence is caused
by the canoes OF the Indians" In Aus
tria the principal occupation is gathering
Austricb feathers The tive most famous
volcanoes of Europe are Sodam and CO.
mOrrah," ''Ciipate lasts all the time and
weather only a few days John Bunyan
lived a life of scantity." John Loeke's
WORKS. are full of energy and lack uo little
want of thought Julia Caesar was
quite a military man on the wlIohs.' by
the Sale laws no woman OF descendant of
a woman could occupy the throne" Co
lumbus knew the earth was round because
he balanced an egg on the table Al
fred the Great reigned S72 years; he was
distinguished for Letting some buckwheat
cakes burn, and the lady scolded him.
The evening times., 1895-10-18

The new college graduate regards his ed
ucat ion as a tool to use for the service of
his own time. He recognizes that the social
problems now presenting themselves are
not to be solved by semtimentalism or pas
sion or enthusiasm, but need. first OF all.
wisdom, and SD he gives himself to study
for the sake OF social utility. And as he
thus seriously turns to sociological studies
he finds himself in new companionship.
He discovers that one other body OF men
and women with m1ch OF the same patience.
though with far less opportunity. are try
ing to understand in some philosophical
. way the social stpation. 1t is not the EN-
ployer class With many notable excep-
1t is the working people.
Tho simple fact is that an amount OF hard
study is going on in many working. ans
home. and a kind of literature is to be found
: by many a hand. workers. evening lamp OF
which prosperous classes have, for the most
part, no conception. And SO the young uni
versity man and the workingman naturally
meet. Each has his limitations. The mex
perienccd youth Is sometimes more enthusi-
astio than he is wise, and the workingman
is often crude and impracticable- But this.
at least. is true, that these TWO types meet
: and know each other and are beginning to
believe in each other. Whatoo3ld be better
for, either type than this mutual understand
ing and respect?
The evening times., 1895-10-18

A teacher said to her class, whom do you
especially wish to see when YOU go to heav-
en-? 'Gerliah," was probably the most
candid answer she received. There was no
hypocrisy in the. boy who longed to see
the great giant who had been defeated by
young David.
The religious teachings of home and school
Seem to give a flavor to answers SD very
different subiects-especially when reli-
gious. teaching is a matter of menorizing
words not understood The girl who said
"A Republican is a sinner mentioned in the
Bible" and the boy who wrote, There
are good many donkeys in the theological
gardens had evidently received reli-
gious training.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
LOVES DISAPPOINTMENT.
Wedded on Thanksgiving Eve at che Age
of 80, He Now Seeks Divorce.

A romantic Indiana marriage that took
place here Thanksgiving eve bids fair to
culminate in the wreck of the matrinon-
ial bark. The principals to the wedding
were Charles Moore, a Monroe county
farmer, aged S9 years, and Mrs. Amanda
Pierce of Kokomo aged a. They have not
lived together since the ceremony, and
the groom has applied for divorce.
The couple in early childhood, were
lovers, high spirited, strong willed. and
stubborn, characteristic that remains
with them yet to a remarkable degree. A
lovers quarrel and separation by removal
threw their lives in different paths. Both
married other companions, reared large
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
D.. L. & w. Railroad.
station .e Bloorzansad Avsrasao
Corrected Dec. 18th 1894.

Corrected Dec. 18th 1894.
Leave Passaic for New York:
*6.s5, 7.3I. 7.s7, S.33. t8.4S. tIr.s9- a m.
I.1S. 2.25. 4-o2, *4,4o. 6.27, *7.3I. P. N.
Going West.
7.35. 7.5S, 1908, Ills. a. m. SI.35. ass.
6.27, p. m.
Leave New York, CFoOt OF Barclay
md Christophcr Sts.) for Passaic.
$50. 7.2o. $50, 1890, a. m. SI.oo,
r 10, $40, p. m.
sStops to let off passengers from Easton and
points north of Washington.
rStops to let off passengers from Dover and
points west
ssIops to take on passengers forpoints north Of
Washington
THROUGH okNNxu6
Pullman, vestibule, razlor, sleepan8 au4 u1gI
Cars New York to Binghamton, UteA, OtWV&
2lmira, Bath, Buffalo, Chicago and n Po16o
west. Leave HOB0kEN Is follows:
a15 NJ. LIS, 7.45, and s.4SPM
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
HOW sMUeGlER5 WORK.
The Canadian Border Infested by Free
Traders.

Traders.
Smugglers? Thousands of them. They
swarm along the Canadian border from
ocean to ocean. 1t may be the track OF q
solitary sledge on the ST. Lawrence, or
fishing schnooer beating into quiet
bay where there are no fish; or, If you
like, well dressed woman hiding for-
tune in gems in the rug with which she
protects silk pug from the cold as the
train nears the frontier-the methods
change from time to time, for in novelty
ofttimes there is safety, but the SNUG
glers, like the poor. are with us always.
The fact now is Just what it has been
ever since there has been population
enough on both sides of the border TO
make the evasion OF the tariff paying
business for adventurous spirits-Uncle
Sam cannot police his long line Of border
fence, nor indeed do any more than make
a poor bluff at it, and trust to the moral
sense Of the people for the rest. And
when the fence isn't watched the al
mighty dollar crowds the moral sense
of the people to the wall, and there's an
end to it. Give the frontiersman a
chance to smuggie and he viii arrange
the matter with his conscience
And how dc smugglers smuggle2 Well
put that question q day or two ago to
"A. L. Drummond, who used 10 be the
head of the United States Secret Service
in New York, and who did sterling work
against the opium carriers years ago.
Just take for example, Detective
Drummond said, ''fhe tricks devised by
the men who snugg!a opium over the
border from Canada. The duty has been
changed now, suppose, but in my day
smuggler could save SO a pound on the
drug. Well, what do they dor You
know what an or iuary carpenters tool
box looks like. They wi'i take such
box and fix it with little panels of draw
ers, which only a minute inspection will
disclose, or place "a false bottom in 1t,
or false top, leaving room to slip in
the thin, oblong cakes, abd then coolly
walk over the bridge or border, after the
manner of an honest work man."
But methods, like smugglers, are In
Vulnerable, and vary with the goods to
be carried and the station and dress of the
person VINO carries them.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19

Mr.. Goodman-My poor man, you seem
Respondent. You are out of employ
ment, no doubt. But cheer up, the time
will soon come when you will find your
self working, and
Weary Weeks dnterrupting) = Dat is
wot worries me, boss. / struck as many
as er dozen people ter day widout gettin'
a cent, an if business don't pick up I'll
hev ter go to work. l can't see no way
out of tn-Brooklyn Life.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
PUT UP ON THE MINISTER.
If He Hadn't Had the Tobacco Habit
,Twouldn't have Happened.

'Twouldn't have Happened.
The clerks in the office were always on
the alert to play some joke on Sniffies,
the junior bookkeeper, and the strangest
part of it was that they always managed
to catch him unawares.
The other day the clerks loaded
tempting looking cigar with an appar-
emily harmless explosive. 1t was gra-
ciously offered to Sniffies, who accepted
it with profuse thanks, saying he would
smoke it after dinner that evening.
1t SO happened that this very evening
Sniffies' wife, who was very religious
woman, had invited the minister to din
ner. The minister loved good cigars, and
Sniffies, knowing this, proudly asked
him to have cigar and unselfshly and
innocently handed him the one which he
had received that afternoon from the
clerks in the Office.
Sniffies' wife was pleased at her hus-
bands generosity to the minister and
looked on with pleasure as the minister
contentedly lighted the cigar.
Suddenly there was report, the min
lister fairly howled with terror, and the
air was filled with smoke. Sniffles and
his wife were surprised and shocked
beyond expression.
"Heavens!'' muttered Sniffies "that's
the work of those d-n clerks again."
The minister's face was red with rage.
Half of his beautiful side whiskers had
been singed aud he looked sight. He
gave one terrible glance at Sniffies, then
took his hat and departed.
.sNever shall enter this house again"
he said with great emotion as he shut the
door.
That night there was war in Sniffies'
house. His wife accused him of having
loaded the cigar on purpose in order to
drive the minister away. All his expla-
nations were in vain, and now Sniffies and
his wife have ceased to speak.
The clerks are still wondering whether
Sniff1es smoked that cigar, but he is SO
silent about the matter that they can't
get anything out of him.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19

windows. A Bowery sport, intent on
having fun with him, tapped him on tho
shoulder and said:
Say, young feller, are yer wild me or
ag'in me?"
"Pm wild you and ag'in you and onto
you," replied the dudish looking youth,
and when they picked up the Bowery
sport and carried him away he looked
as if he had mistaken cable car for an
all-night owl lunch wagon.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
Taken by Surprise.

Cousin Jane-Did you stay up late
Christmas ever"
Jack Yes; brother Bobby and I lay
awake, and about Ii o'clock we heard the
door open, and in came Santa Claus; up
Jumped Bobby and /, and grabbed him.
Who do you think it WASP
Cousin Jane-Santa Claus, of course.
Jack-No, 1t was papa.-Chicago Rec
ord.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19

By tnis means they avoid the inelegant
phraseology of old Mrs A. y"
This is also to some extent the custom
in some parts of the Pacific Slope It
should be more generally adopted, for no
mother-in-law wishes to be known as
sold Mrs" Woman's sensitiveness as to
age is apparently as old as humanity,
for Sarah is the only woman whose age
is mentioned in the Bible.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
ERIE RAILWAY.
Schedule of Nov. rs. 1894.

Schedule of Nov. IS. 1894.
Leave Passaic for New York.-45eos
1900, rs. SO, 7.o7, t7.26. so. 1907, s.22.
S.Ae, o.2o, +ro.32 1851, tII.2o. a. m.,
1907, fI2.27, LIS, z.I6, 3.o4, IA. o.. .f4.47.
s.sI, +6I7, TOP, fS,12, fo.oI, 1901. tI.33'
p. m
Sunday Trams.-f7.26, 7.so. $50. 1925.
f1i.ao, a. m.; 12.32, fI.26, 2.2S, 3-o4,
is.s6. fs.ox, 6.s7 1906, 1000, 1o.oo'
HISS p. m.
tStops also at Harrison street, Prospect
street, and the Bridge stations.
Leave New York for Passaic.--4-oo.
4-45. t5.4s. t6. so, 7.45, to. 80, 10. 3o &i2.oo.
a. M: LOO, so. t2. 40. 3.o7, 3.s7. o7.
1887. 500. ISIS 1880. ts.4s, 600. o.15.
M, tx2.15, midnight.
Sunday Trains-4-oo. 4. 80, 7.4s. $50
10. 90, a. M; tl2.oo, noon, 1890. 4I.oo,
400. 1900. 400, ts-oo $50. 7.3o, a45e
$50. tfo.So. 1890. p. M, fs&I5, md
night.
tSeop a. Harrison and Prospect streets.
Leave Passaic for Paterson. n.-4~43, SAT.
$50. 7.3I. 8.a3, 1910, rI.o4. a m,; Is.4I.
Y.s7, 2.aS, $40, $40, 4. 10, 4.44, 5.I6, 5.33.
s.s3, 6.I2, 6.74, 6-3s, $50. ia. 7.36, s.rI.
o.3s, II.II. p. M. I2,r1, 1856. midnigne.
Sunday Trans-4-4s. s.a7. a.as. 1oIo
II.oI. a. M. 1899, LII 1.42. 7.4o, 3-47s
4s6. SAL, 5.Io, S.II, o.32, 1912, IT~1I,
p. m.. 1914, 1854. midnight.
Leave Paterson for Passaic. .-5- I9.
s.sS, 6.25, 6.57. 7.I5, 7.4o, 7.55, s.r4. S.33.
e,2o, 1920, Io.4I, lilo. 1859, a. ms
12. I6, I.o4, 2.o5, 2.57, .3.s2. 4.35, 5.2os
6.os. $50, 800, $50, $50, II.22, p. m.
Sunday Trains.-7.15, 7.4o. o.Ie. 10 IS.
II.Io, a. M, 1921, LIS. 2.I8, 2.57. 344-
$50. 6.44, 7.s2, $50. $50. II.2e. P. m.
THROUGH SERVICE.
Solid trains between New York and Chicago
VIA Chautauqua Lake or Niagara Falls Pullman
cars between New York and Rochester BTralo,
Niagara Falls Toronto, Chautauqua Lake, CieFe-
land, Cincinnati, and Chicago:
Leave JERSEY CITY as follows:
$50 a. m. train EVERY day,-through tram to
Salamanca-Pullman Parlor car New York TO Sus-
Quehanna, stops at Passaic 0.51 a. m on signaas
to take on passengers for Binghamton and potn1s
west.
3.15p. m-vestibule limited Solid train for
Chicago, Via Ghausa,,quan nhs. Iaae wsh ssa dining ca
e.4S D. m-soHd train to Chicago by Niaems
Falls; sleepers TO Buffalo, Rochester, Toruueo
and Chicago.
$50 p. m.--via Chautauqua Lake and Niag.n
Falls. Solid train to Chicago Sleepers 70 Buf9la
Chicago and Cincinnati. Stop At Passatc ae ,Qe8
p. m. to take on passengers Tor Binghamton a.
beyond.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19

What are you learning to sing?"
Willie-'Sweet Marie"
Goodness! that's been sung to death
long ago."
Willie-I know, an the folks will pay
ule to stop singin'-Chicago Inter Ocean.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
Madam and Mrs.

Sir Charles Lyeil says: The title of
madam is given in Charleston and the
south of the United States generally to a
mother whose son has married. The
dxughter-in law then becomes Mrs.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
n. Z, Sus.. & w. Railroad.


0e06111R 00x. - x10t - GS60ex ste.
Time Table Nov. "a, 1894.
passaic to New York.-#S.xa Y1.os, ..
m. I.I3, $50, 600, p. m.
New York to Passaic. 80. q. M.
$50. $50, p. m.
vares single trip 3sc. Excursion soc.
~Connscts at Rochelle Park ct Q. "a
With Tram No. for points north and
west to Middletown and Suoudsburg.
~ All trains run daily except Sunday.
Trains Geing West.
For Middletown, Leave Paterson City
ESQ. a. M. and s.o4 p. m.
For Delaware Water Gap, Stroudsburg
Wilkesbarre. etc.. leave Paterson City
q.ao .. M. daily, and s.o4 p. M. and
Paterson broadway 4.3I and e.4a p. m.
Through tickets on sale 1t Passaic,
Paterson, and Hackensack for following
points on
PENNSYLVANIA RAILROAD:
Princstown. New Brunswick, Trsnton.
Germantown Junction, Philadelphia,
Wilmington. Baltimore, Washington, D.
G.. Long Branch, Ocean Grove and Sea
Girt.
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19
He Was.

A dudish looking youth was walking
down the Bowery. looking In at the shon
Passaic City record., 1895-01-19

~ o GOING TO GET MARR!EB1
ycI II 60, we are prepared to dn your order for
j Invitations and cards IN whatever style you
than New York prices.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-05-01
BRAYED AND PLAYED.
Burros Turned Loose at the Ferry.
Fun Spoiled by a Col
lision.

Quite a commotion was caused on the
water front yesterday afternoon by the ar
rival of over a score of burros from San
Rafael, en- route to Oakland to participate
in the May Day festival. The frisky little
animals come from Mount Tamalpais,
where for years they have been climbing
up and down the giddy heights carrying
tourists. They came trooping off the
Tiburon ferryboat and rushed out on the
wharf in all directions, but behaved very
decently until they heard the changing of
the dummy gongs and footing OF the ferry
whistles.
Then pandemonium seemed to be let
loose. The tribe from the mountain
brayed and kicked and jumped, and the
herders had their hands full keeping the
burros into anything like decent line.
When the animels came to cross Market
street there was more trouble, and Sergeant
Mahoney was sent for. The officer quickly
hurried to the scene of strife, and the
leader of the burro belligerents took his
?. measure as he came. The brute lowered
his lest ear and winked the other eye.,
Excuse me-" said the sergeant, "1've
met this gentleman before This is not a
case for policemen. Try the newspaper
boys"
Everybody who is at all familiar with
the ferry landings knows what a crowd of
newsboys can be gathered in a few
moments. In less time than it takes to
tell it nearly every bnTEo had boy on his