Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1895-11-20

perhaps. It's OF ledge Baker, and hes
So plaguey OF an so powerful IeeDle
-h3t he don't know nOthin'.
IL seems that in the spring NV IL
The wear thar Cy WatsOn's Oldest Doy
WIZ drowned In West River-there
come along q book agent sell-n' vol
yumcs and tracts f'r the diffusion Nv
knowledge nd havin' go, the recon-
mend Of the minister and NV the select
men. he done an ALFRED big business
tn cur part NV the country. HIS name
WIZ Lemuel Higgins. nd he wuz ez
likely a talker q I ever herd, barrln
Lawyer C0nkey. nd everybody allowed
that when CCnkey WIZ around he talked
90 fest that The town pump nd have 70
be creased every twenty minutes.
One NV the first NV our folks that
this Lemuel Higgins struck WIZ Lean
der Hobart. Leander had jest MARI d
one OF the Peasley girls. nd had moved
into the old homestead on the Plainville
rc3d-Old Deacon Hobart havin' give
ND the place TO him, the other boys
nlvin moved out West like lot o darn
Cd fools that they wuz. Leander wuz
feel.n' his oats jest about this time nd
nutlin' WUz tcc good fr him.
Hattie. SEE he II guess III have 20
ley Go few books fr re9din' in the
WiUter time. nd I've hall q notion 10
subscribe fr q cyclOpoedy. Mr.. H.g-
gins here SAYS they're iuvalerabel in a
family, and that we orter have EN-,
be.n as how we're likely 10 have the
family bime by"
"L0r's cakes. Lesnier, how you TALK
seq Hattie. blushin' all over, eZ brides
aIlus does to heern tell nv SIGH things
WAL. 20 make a long story Short,
Lelnder bargained wl;h Mr. Higgins
for SET wv them cyclopeed.es nd he
signed his name 90 q long printed pa
per hat showed how be agreed 20 take
q cyclCueaiv ones iu so often. which
wuz t0 bc "a often ez new one of The
yolvumos WIZ printed A cyclcpeedy
l-1r printed an at once. because that
would se c's. too much. c0nsekelt-
Ir tle man -sat g.-s % mp hiss Go strung
'cr~ rr apart so as to hit folks 0ncet
F.ry year or -w0. and ginully about
harvest time So Lc1ndCr kind NV
A.l Che .iee and be signed the print
I'D paper and made hts affidavit % s.
1l0-e Jgira Warner.
The ms vc.yIme of the cyclopeedy
STOOD c1 O. shelf 90 the old seclretary In
e .n room about four months be-
lore they had any use f'r &C. One night
Squire Turner's son COME over TO visit
Leendcr nd Hattie nd they got to talk
ln about apples. nd the sort NV apples
.aa- WIZ the best. Le3nder lowed that
Le Rhode Island greenin' WIZ the best,
but Hattie and the Turner boy stuck
mp t'r the RoXbury russet. until at last
q Happy idee struck Leander, and SEE
he: Wen leave :, to the cyclOpeedy,
5gcsh. Whichever one the cyclopeedy
SEE is The bes, viii settle it,"
'But you can't md cut nothin' bout
Rcxbury rusets nor Rhode Island green
In in cur cycl0peedy.' SEE Hattie.
why not, I'd like to knOw?" SEE Le-
antcr, kind NV Indignant like.
cause ours haint got down to the
r yet' sez Hattie. "All ours tells about
is things begnn.n with A"
Well amt we Jalkin' about Apples p"
seq Leander. You aggeryate me ter
r.b.e Hattie, By insistin' on KNOWN
what You don't know nothin' bout"
Leander went 20 the seckertary nd
took down the cyclOpeedy nd hunted
all through it fr Apples. but all he
could find WIZ 'Apple-See POm0logy. 8"
How In thunder kin I see Pomol-
cgy, seq Leander, when there aint no
P0m0logy 10 see? Col durn a CYCLIC
pcedy. anyhow
And he put The volyume back onto the
shelf nd never sot eyes into it agin.
That's the way the thing run f'r
ye ars nd years. Leander wouldve GIN
mp the plaguey bargain but ne couldn't:
he had signed a printed paper nd had
swore TO It afOre a justice Of uhe peace.
Higgins would have had the law on him
ii he had throwed up the trade.
The most aggtrvadn' feature NV Il all
WIZ that new one NV them cussid
cyclopeed.es WIZ allus sure TO show up
ut the wrong time-when Iaander wuz
hard mp or had jcs, been affected some
way or Other. His barn burnt down
-Wo nights 2fore the vOlyume contain
tire letter 3 arrived, and Leander need
ed all his chink to pay fr lumber. but
Higgins sot back on that affidavit and
dedcd the life out NV him.
Never mind. Leander," SEE his wife,
sOothin like, its good a good book to
have In the house, anyhow, now that
we've got a baby"
That's so, 80 SCI Leander, babies does
begin with B. don't it?'
You see their iust baby had been
. born; they named him Peasley -Peasley
Hobar,-af,er Hattie's folks. So, seem
as how it wuz payin' fr a book that
told about babies, Leander didn't be-
gredge that FIVE dollars so very much
after all
"Leander." sez Hattie one forenoon,
'Jhat p cycl0peedy aint no account.
FThere aint nothin' in il about babies ex-
/ cepJ See Maternity
WAL. III be gosh durnedr SEE
I Leandsr. That WIZ all he said, and he
couldn't do nothin' at all, f'r that book
/ agent Lemuel Higgins, had the dead
+ wood on him-the mean, sneakin' crit
ter
So tle years passed on, one Of them
I cyclCpeelies shown up now nd then
-s0ms-imes every two years nd some
/ times every four. but allus at q time
when Leauder found It pesky hard TO
+ give Up a FLYER. II warnt no use cuss-
In Higgins; Higgins just LATED when
Le3nder allowed that the cyclopeedy
WIZ no good nd hat he WIZ bein rob
bed Meantime Lenders family wuz
increasin' and CROWN Little Sarey
/ had The hoopin cough dreadful one
winter but The cyclopeedy didn't help
[ OUT a- all. cause all it said wuz: Hoop
/ in' C1ugh-See Whoopin' Cough" and
7 NV course, there warn't no WhOopin'
/ Cough TO see, bein' as how the W hadn
/ come yeti
Oncet when Hiram wanted to dreen