Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1895-09-29
YANKEE VS.. BRITON.
Lively Duel of Words Across the Din
ner Table.

Lively Duel Of Words Across the Dln-
ner Table.
Arguments will arise in the best re-
gulated of countries and one was start
ed in a well known restaurant on
Broadway, near Thirtieth street, a few
nights ago, that resulted in two men
losing their heads, metaphorlcaily,
says the New York Press.
1t was a case Of England versus AM
erica-much versus.
The two men were seated opposite
each other eating a couple OF beeI-
steaks. The American asked the Eng
lishman if he was through. The Eng
lishman smiled.
Through what?" he asked.
your supper of course
81 did not see any hole in It TO get
through" said the Englishman.
Il merely asked if you were through
remarked the American.
ooh. have [ finished? That's what
Won mean. Ell? Well, why didn't you
say so? You Americans dlstort our
language So. .-,.o4oa
"WeH. we don't call derby hats Dllly-
cocks" he said.
NO, but you might call them OAR
beys," was the reply
The Yankee bit at his steak as IL ne
wanted to eat it.
Presently the Englishman remarked
"These are very nice Tomatoes.
Eyes" replied his friend. Ihe po-
tahtoes aren' t bad, either. 49,
T-,c~IfcbrnaU said S0IQeIulus
about il being neither 'potahtoes,' nor
"tomahtoes" in the old country ill.,
The supper was continued IN slIeI lC,
for some time. Savage glares pasSeu
across the table between the Dltes.
Finally the Englishman sald' MY
boots pain me terribly.
u never wear them was the reply
Only farmers wear boots. -,
"Wbat are you wearing now
"Bab| said the Engl'shman, who
was getting in a rage. 81 suppose you
bought your shoes in a store, ana II you
asked for Oxford ties you would get
hobnailed boots. Where do you BUY
your shoes anyway; in a draper
shop?" -om
mol in a dry goods store!
The Englishman had risen from MS
seat hut he promptly sat down again
when he heard the reply.
well. I'm going up city" he said as
he rose again. 49,, 4bo
renIv Another glare passed between
the men. -,ou os,,od tho
How will you travel?' asked the
/ Britisher.
ION the cable %
The American said something about
rats and asked the Englishman how ne
would ride. 81. .o,,iod
Owe have none here.
'WeH. the railway, then.
1--WE use the railroads. ,.-
~, This time the men were standing
;,,,notientlv on the restaurant steps.
Quite a number Of gentlemen hau saIn-
cred round to hear how the CONVERSE
ton would end. 1877
rho American went into the street
pant attract a crowd by staEdlhs
an the pavement" said Jonn Bull
This is q sidewalk, said the Amer
lean. with d smile. ..o, o,o-
After d little conversation o. =.
which no argument occurred one sa'g
La a. wouid like 10 90 to the theatre ana
Gee s, a GOOD variety show, and tae ot .i
eoia he preferred a music hall en'ei-
PoiT were strangers III New YORK.
The American asked @ paSsei-'y uio
,yav fo Madison square.
you 20 right along take lns n .,e
mine to the right where you see tae
sign and you are right there so'll 'He
stranger.
"Right?"
Right
Fright" -. bic fr;ard
S'a aWe never ne eg get left here" said 'he
a Wien they arrived at their desiina'
.;om H tba last words heard were:
10y Come along, wei take the e'oFa-
tor" ,,...
40 tn