The Kimball graphic. (Kimball, Brule County, Dakota [S.D.]) 1883-1905, 1895-07-06
Flashes of Humo,

Flashes of Humo,.
'Ah.' remarked Mr.. Quilp, "put women
haven't the play of intellect tina men en-
joy"
NO, Of course not" snapped Mrs.
Quilp. "Woman's intellect works."
why nave you got such a bare neck,
Mummie2"
I'm going to a dance. darling. One
has to dress like thisf for a dance"
D the ladies dance in one room and
the gentlemen in another. Mummie?"
Bacon-Did YOU see Hooker when he
caine in from f%shing?"
E2hert-Yes; ] was on the float.
Was there any fish lying about him."
No; he was lying about the fish
Jimmy-Aunty. Aunty! \ great big BIZ
cycle rider run into uncle down street-
Aunt Sarah-l,h' ole fool. He must
n-bin praetisin' his Fourth o. July speech.
Il will work night and day to make you
happy he said.
No" she answered, th%oughtfully,
don't do that Just work during the
day and stay home at night"
Miss foungun-The regents of the
State University have abolished the de-
gree of bachelor of letters.
Miss Oldun-I am so pleased to hear it;
II had my way would abolish bache-
lors entirely.
1T vas this way; He came UP to me
and shook his fist under my nose and said
! " 'bShl.
'And you did?"
of course | didn't. Do you p
there is a man on earth who could get
me to do anything by saying | had to do
It? Any man who expects me to fight
has TO say 'pleaSa'"
let?
Tommy-I-I guess it is where a felle,
don't take much interest in the game and
roots kinder easy like.
Dukane-What is the Order of Cincin.
natl, Gaswell?
Gaswell-l was never in the town more
than two or three times, but Their |
gathered the impression that the usual
was beer and bologna
Mrs. P~oorman-Thls money question
seems to be getting very bitter. How dc
you feel about it, dear?
MI. Poorman--Bad enough. Really.
Pm all broke up.
What do you publish a paper for. I'd
Ike to know" inquired a politician of o
unit editor.
For 81 a year in advance, and you ows
me for four years. was the reply.
Statistics prove that nearly two-thirds
of all the letters carried by the postal
service of the world are written, sent to
and read by English-speaking people.
"Hush!' he whispered, with a warning
gesture. Isn't that the night watch
mans rattle?"
No, Mr.. Sampson" replied the girl,
grinding coffee for breakfast"
Il understand that a fellow has to
know a lot to get into office under the
District government" said the young
man.
"Y-e-e-s." replied the old employee. TITS
Pretty Grl-1m engaged to Mr.. De
Shy.
Envious RIVAL am astonished.
Il thought you would be-"
Yes. Everybody said he was so bash.
full that only an experienced widow could
bag him."
You know, DEAR" said Miss Dolyers
frankly. to her accepted sutton, you
know we get none of papa's money Will.
he lives"
II quite understand that, my precious
pet replied the young IA with TIL,
light of love In his eyes. I'VE will invite,
him to hve with US, put a folding bed ir
his room. and hope for the best"
Harry. here are three apples; now sup
pose | wanted you to divide them equally
between James, John and yourself, how
would you do it,"
"Td give them one ana keep the 9th.
ers.'
why, how do you make that out?"
We'll; you see. 1t would be one fol
those two. and one for me, too"
Corporal When approaching you,
horses from behind you must call out I'd
them. else they Will kick your thicl
skulls. and the end of the story Will bt
that-we have nothing but lame horse.
in the squadron.
n good idea for him to know considerable
provided he doesn't tell any of It,"
Landlord (apologetically)-This elevat.
or seems to run a little slow just now.
Guest-oh, that's all right. There's a
clerk on board with one of the guests
bills
-
her sister points on the art of how to
manage a husband.
They "a when Cupid aims his dart
He rarely ever misses;
Yet. when he shoots at oman's heart.
It's then he makes the Mrs.
New York Dispatch.