The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-04-03

the Dead Sea, been through.the Holy and
and the unholy land had the gloves on in
every city of any size, sprang my patent
striking air bag on all the natives, and got
back:to God $ own country. I'd rather. be
a well-groomed dog in America than "a
prince in Paris. a count in Naples or a
khedive in Egypt. -. -.
"Take my word for it, you re a way off
. better here than. in any, city in the world.
Where 1 travelled / saw everything. i
didn't skim over*-the country; T. looked
underneath the surface. The worst coun-
try l. was I'M was. Italy, They're in bad
state: oyer there. The people are. taxed to
death. Why, / tell: you; cats are a luxury
electric light he not only has to pay for it
but he has to pay 5 per cent more in: taxes
/ for the privilege of doing it. A poor man
dares not take bucket of water out Of the
sea-. No, sir; the salt in it is taxable. The
porters and walters over there don't get
no pay. No, sir; they pay so much for
their positions and live on tips. 1t is the
same In France.
"In Alexandria the country is in a terri
bic state of depression, but they have got
great donkeys over there. They get over
the ground at the. rate of twenty miles an
hour. Il. took one at Jerusalem and can
tered down TO Jericho and to the Jordan in
great shape. But they've got men in
Egypt who can pile over the ground nearly
as. fast. Two Of them carried me sixty
miles in four -hours-well it was not five
hours and they said 1t was sixty miles. /
went to the tomb of Absalom, and also to
that of Solomon. I. was in the house of
David and the Church of the Nativity, and
| saw the manger in which Christ was
born and the seprilcher where he was
buried. Il went into the garden of Geth-
semaIie. -
But, say; those missionaries that we
put up for to go and save the benighted
heather, they're corkers, they are. Talk
about their sufferings. Why, they're liy-
ing in luxury, with more attention. and
comfort than a. man gets here: who is
worth $4,000. They don't do nothin' but
live on the fat of the land. In India.
China and Japan they arein clover. .Phey
go out to the East with good intentions
enough, but they find that the Parsee and
the Bhuddist have better religions than
they can. offer' and they settle. down to
enjoy life. The .ChinamaIi or Jap who
says he iseconverted to- Christianity is a
liar. In India. the missionaries have
attendants to wait. on EN-. bathe 'em, go
errands apd. elephants to ride.
~ went through China and Japan, and
it's no wonder that the.Japs licked those
otherfelIows. The Japs are. the finest lot
I:have been thirty years building up. men,
and | know d man.when I see. him. Put
young fellow in my gymnasium and I'll
punch him in the stomach. and crack him
on the nose, and1'll tell you. in five min
utes if there is anything in him. In Toxic.
Colonel Cockerill and i were reviewing
the JAPANESE army. You know the
colonel; don't you2 He's the greatest
newspaper man in America; Well, / felt
the legs and biceps of those Japs and the
muscular development was something
wonderful. They can stand the greatest
amount of hardship and endurance, and
the Chinese why, they are babies