Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1895-10-31
OUR BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND Do
lNGS HERE AND THERE.
Jokes and Joke1ets that Are Supposed
to Have Been Recently Born-SayinG0
and Doings that Are Odd, Curious and
Lauchable-The Weeks Humor.
Let Us All Laugh.

w G I'LL agree WITH tIlS.
But age has never yet increased
The flavor of Il kiss.
Truth.
Bellefeld-The Fayes comet is said
to be very faint. Bloomfield You would
be faint, too, if you had travelled as
far.-Pittsburg Chronicle-Telegraph.
Yeast-Did you ever hug delusion?
Crimsonbeak-Yes; before | married |
thought the woman / loved was worth
Observation-Disclosures Statesman.
The candidate who is quite content
To be out or be in the fight.
Who'd rather be right than PRESIDENT,
Will probably be right.
Boston Courier
How are you succeeding in keeping
house in the country, Mr.. Hip" "First
rate at that. But the neighbors have
borrowed almost everything else."-
Harlem Life.
Il will take some of this materials
but will it wear welly' "Oh! it is inl
destructible-untea everlasting
it will wear till you pay for it!'-Un1
Sere GeSellSchaft.
Mrs. Ayebee-Men are such funny
things! When Ayebee asked me to be
his he was the most dlsconsolate man
imaginable. Mrs. Ceedee-I can we'll bes
lieve that.-Boston Transcript
Yoh doan' hyah many song birds
When de wintah's DRAWN nears
But yoh hyahs de turkey gobble,
An dat satisfies de ear.
Washington Star.
II wonder what makes those buttons
burst off SOP Dora petulantly exclaim-
ed. David looked at her tight-fitting
dress. ''Force of habit, probably" no
said, after thoughtful pause.-Rock-
land Tribune
What do you think will be the out1
come of the war in Cuba?'' That's
replied the man who answers every
question, depends a good deal ON the
income Of the Spanish treasury
Washington Star.
Il hardly know whether to marry her
or not" said the count. "Her father il
in the clothing trade" '"There is money
in Clothes" said the duke 'There isn't
any in mine,' said the count-Indian-
apolis Journal.
Sweet Indian summer sings it's song
Where burning fever dwelt-
And the apple dumping comes along,
To fill want long felt.
Cleveland Plain Dealer
HAh cold tho b,,ro1or vx,bo bo Z o,,o1
seen better days, "this reminds me Of
the day / attained my majority"
Flows that?' asked his partner, emp
tying the cash box into his pocket. II
have come in for some oney."-Truth.
Gadzooks-I tell you, Younghusband
dresses up his pretty wife in great style.
Zounds-That's all right, but her wom-
ell friends make up for it by giving her
a dressing down whenever they talk
about her.-New York Tribune.
"A word to the wise is sufficient"
Is a maxim we've frequently heard;
And now what we want is maxim
To tell us just what is that word.
Philadelphia Record.
ington, if you would make a few
speeches for gold" ''For gold? Well,
should say so! For gold, silver, green
backs, notes, garden sass or cordWood.
Times are hard, Colonel. New York
Recorder.
Beatrice sends us some verses entitled
"Why Do ! Live!" We cannot use
your contribution, Beatrice, but we
can answer your conundrum. You
live simply because you send your
verses instead of bringing them.-Yon-
,kers Statesman.
All, the love untold, the kiss unkissed,
Too often in life we reach;
But the candidate never will let us get
SO far as the unspoken speech.
Washington Star.
You don't object to contributor
dropping into poetry once in a while. I
presume|' said the caller with an afs
fable smile Certainly not, sir. Sit
down." replied the editor, pushing the
waste basket toward him.-Chicago
Tribune.
hdQDOufL-1 suppose lHdl Wien LIE
emancipated woman has ultimately
conquered, our girls will be going for
soldiers. Chesney-I should not be sur
prised. They went for them long be-
fore the e. w. was ever thought off,
Harlem Life.
II understand that the railroad COM
panies are making great preparations
for carrying bicycles next summer"
Yes, wheelmen are beginning to get
their rights. Why, know of one road
this year that actually refused to allow
more than two TRUNKS to be put on top
of one Wheel.'-Brooklyn Life.