davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

GIVING HIM A PoINT.-The dude
drummer from New York was making
his first trip West, land down in Missouri
he began to get quite flip. He had a
fair chance on q train 10 take the seat
next bright-faced Missouri girl, and,
of course, he took it, and it wasn't
long before he was doing his best to
be entertaining to the young woman.
She couldn't help herself very we'll,
and took it good-naturedly.
"Did you know" he said, after some
time, "that this is my first trip, and I
am fresh from the East ?"
"Well, no." she replied, so the peo-
pie around could hear. 81 didn't
know it-that is to say, didn't know
you were from the East, and if you
really are from the East, it is about
time you should RISE"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19
4 PAINTERS INGENUITY.

Gustave Wiertz, Il painter of Brussels,
was such an eccentric genius that he
was often called the "insane artist" i"
But there was always method in his
madness which showed plenty ofsense.
The following arecdote is told of him ::
Having finished the portrait of the
aristocratic Countess lie NJ, who
pretended to be only 80 when nearly
60 years of age, she refused to accept
the painting, saying that it did not
look anything like her; that her most
intimate friends would not recognize
single feature of hers on that piece
of canvas. Wiertz smiled kindly at
the remark, and, as a true knight of
old gallantry reconducted the lady to
her carriage. The next morning there
was grand disturbance in the Rue de
la Madeline. A crowd was gathered
before a window, and the following
words were whispered from ear to ear ::
SIS the wealthy Countess de NJ
really in Jail for debt ?"
Wiertz had exercised little ven-
ScaOC6 UOWtTu Ills uOulC uuC uuithii
customer. AS soon as she had refused
the portrait, he had set to work and
painted a few iron bars on the picture,
with these words: "In Jail for debt" /"
He exhibited the painting in jewelers.
shop window in the principal street of
Brussels. The effect was instanta-
neous. A few hours later the countess
was back at Wiertz's studio, pouring
invectives upon him.
"Most noble lady," was the artists
reply" "you said the painting did not
look anything like yourself, and that
your most intimate friends would not
have recognized single one of your
features in the picture. / wanted sim
ply to test the truth Of your statement,
that is ALL"
The portrait was taken away, the
city laughed, the artist charged double
price, and gave the amount to the
poor Of the city.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19
Humorous department.

THE "RAILRoAD HOG. "A "rafl-
road hog" the other day, piled the
space next to him in a car seat with
his bundles, and when gentleman
asked him if anyone was to occupy it,
replied that the bundles belonged to a
man who was temporarily in the
smoking-car.
call right" said the gentleman, "G
will sit in the seat till he comes, "
and he proceeded to remove the bum
dies.
Pretty soon the owner of the bum
dies arrived at his destination, and he
started to gather up his effects. But
the gentleman at once put veto on
this, with the remark:
"You can't take these bundles; you
yourself said they belonged to man
in the smoker"
The fellow got mad and abusive ;
but the gentleman was iuexorable.
Finally the conductor was called in,
who delivered his dictum as follows:
eff the bundles are not claimed by
any one on the train, then, by coming
around to the depot tomorrow and
identifying them satisfactorily, we will
give them to you"
The mans face was red with rage ;
but he could do nothing. So, amid
the laughter of the passengers he rush
ed out of the car just as the train was
pulling out. And he meekly came
around to the depot for his bundles the
next day.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

SHE HAD HER REvENGE.-A newly
married couple on the train the other
day attracted good deal of attention
by their peculiar behavior. A lady
got on the train at station and took
a seat in front of them. Scarcely was
she seated before they commenced
making remarks in loud whispers
about her wearing last seasons hat
and dress. She was severely criticised
by them for some moments. Presently
the lady turned around. She noticed
at glance that the bride was older
than the groom, and without the least
resentment in her countenance, she
said:
"Madam, will you please have your
son close the window behind you?"
The son closed his mouth instead,
and the madam did not giggle again
until the brakeman hollered out
"Lula ~
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

Hg Once, on Easter Sunday, at a
certain church, the clergyman an
nounced that the offertory would be
applied to reducing the debt on the
church. During the singing, while
the collection was being taken up, the
tenor, who was German, had solo,
in which occurred the words, "And
the dead shall be raised" He succeed
ed in electrifying the congregation by
giving out at the top of his voice,
"And re debt shall he raised in re
twinkling ov an eye"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

s6s In certain village near Cork, q
few years ago, two Irishmen were re-
pairing the roof of a cottage, and one
of them, who was on the roof, wanted
some bricks. There being no ladder,
he shouted to his mate, "Pat, shure
an will yer catch me if jump ?" On
receiving the answer "that he would" "
he jumped, and Pat missed him. On
asking why he did not catch him, he
said, "Bedad, l was waiting till yer
bounced"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

A WONDERFUL CoW.-The cow has
four stomachs, and so can do wonders
in the eating line. A farmer living up
near Toronto fed his COW the other
day by mistake mash of sawdust in
stead of bran. The animal meekly ate
it, supposing it to be merely a freak of
economy. Next morning when the
farmer went to milk the cow, he was
surprised to see her calmly let down
half a gallon of turpentine, a quart of
shoe pegs, three baseball bats, and u
bundle of laths. At least this is the
version of the usually reliable Bessie
vain Globe.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

SLEEPY GRAss.-In some parts of
New Mexico there grows grass which
produces somniferous effect upon the
animals that Craze upon it. Horses,
after eating this grass, in nearly all
cases sleep standing, while COWS and
sheep almost invariably lie down. 1t
has occasionally happened that travel
ers have stopped to allow horses to
feed in places where the grass grew
pretty thickly, and the animals have
had time to eat q considerable quanti-
ty before its effects manifested them
selves. In such cases horses have
gone to sleep on the road, and it is
hard to arouse them.
The effect of the grass passes off in
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

a9 For fabby skin the following
treatment is recommended Never
use hard water upon it; either pre-
serve rainwater for the purpose, or, if
that is impossible, buy distilled water
of a reliable druggist. Eat bread that
is one day old and choose that which
is made from whole meal. A little
gluten made into mash and eaten
with rich milk is also said to help in
rounding out the face and neck.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

s6~ ats all blamed nonsense !" said
Constable Haycraft, at the town meet
ing, bringing his fist down on the
desk with great violence. "It's all
blamed nonsense talkiu' about chill
dren needin' a higher education than
what they did when 1 was boy. A
one-story buildiu' was good enough fur
me, an that's the kind of school
buildin' we'll put up in this deestrict
if it depends on my vote, be gosh! !"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

pa" There is no use walking the floor
with felon. Wrap a cloth loosely
around the felon leaving the end open.
Pour gunpowder in the end and shake
it down until the end is covered, then
keep it wet with camphor. In two
hours the pain will be relieved and a
perfect cure will follow quickly, as
serts the Memphis Similar.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

B9 A bashful young man of Tiffin,
while attending revival meeting, was
approached by an earnest young wo-
man, who said to him, "My dear
friend, it would do my heart good to
lead you to the altar" The young
fellow, hesitating, replied that he ap-
preciated the honor, but as he was
already engaged to two girls, he could
not accommodate her.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

B9 Floorwalker Ito salesman at ho-
siery counter)-You didn't sell that
lady? Salesman No. l showed her
some stockings that I told her would
fit her like glove. She asked if they
were all wool, and l said, "Yes, all
wool and yard wide," and she tlounc-
ed off as though something had dis
pleased her. For the life of me can't
guess what it was"
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19
MIR. II. B. McCLAIN.

right. Prices will be low-low enough to
warrant the conclusion that we really want
to do the biggest part of the repair work
that is going, and we are sure that many
people will find it to their interest to over
haul old vehicles that they have hereto
fore considered aS worthless
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19
We Dress Lumber.

Remember that we DRESS LUMBER
on short notice, in the very best manner
and at reasonable prices. Call on Mr..
McCLAIN for the figures.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19
REPAIR WORK.

We solicit repair work Of all kinds, es-
pecally i'm Buggies, Wagons, Carts and
other vehicles. Our facilities, as is we'll
known, are unrivaled. All work of this
kind will be under the personal supervis-
ion of
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

The best $500 Mems Shoes on the
market.
Made from tannery calfskin, dongola
tops, all leather trimmed. solid leather
soles with Lewis Cork Filled Soles
Unequaled for beauty, fine workman
ship, and wearing qualities. Your choice
of all the popular toes, lasts and fasten-
ings.
Every pair contains paid-up Acct
dent Insurance Policy for 500, good for
80 days.
Wear Lewis Accident Insurance
Shoes, and go insured free,
For Sale BY
CLOVERCOTTON MFG. co..
Glover, S. G.
November 45 1y
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

Trains Nos. 8 and 10 are first-class, and
run daily except Sunday. Trains Nos. 90
and 81 carry passengers and also run daily
except Sunday. There is good connection
at Chester with the G.. c. d n, and the G.,
G.. & A. ; also at Gastonia with the A. & {.
A. l.. at Lincolnton with the c. c.. and
at Hickory and Newton with the w. n. c.
l.. IT. NICHOLS, Superintendent.
Fl. II. BEARD, General Passenger Agent.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

CONNECTIONS.
No. SO has connection with Southern
Railway at Rock Hill.
Nos. "a and 35 will carry passengers.
Nos. IL and II have connection at Marion
with Southern Railway.
At Roddeys, Old Point, Kings Creek
and London, trains stop only on signal.
S. b. LUMPKIN, G. P. A.
A. TRIPP, Superintendent.
SAM'L HUNT, General Manager.
Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-19

TIME TABLE Of the Ohio River and
L Charleston Railway company, to take
effect Saturday, December lst, 1894, at
1.45 a. m.
STANDARD EASTERN TIME.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1895-07-12

DROBATE ORDER:-State of Michigan,
1 County OF Gratot. SIS. At a session OF the
Probate court for said county held at the
Probate Office in the village of Ithaca on the
18TH day Of June in the year one thousand
eight hundred and nnety-five. Present, John
VI. Evcrden, Judge OF Probate In the matter
Of the estate of Mary Ann Hopkins. deceased,
ON reading and cling the petition, duly veri-
fled, of J. +. Suydam. n creditor. praying that
an administrator ne appointed OF the estate of
said deceased.
Thereup1nit is ordered, that Monday, the 18th
day OF july next at ten O'Clock In the fore
noon, be assigned for the hearing OF said petit
ton. and that the heirs-at-law of said deceased,
and all other persons interested in said estate.
are required 10 appear III a session of said
court, then 20 be holden in the Probate Office,
in the Nillage OF Ithaca, and show cause, II any
there be, why the prayer of the petitioner
should not be granted; and IL is further ordered
that said petitioner give notice to the persons
interested In said estate of the pendency OF
said petition, and the hearing thereof, by
causing copy OF this order TO be published in
the ALMA RECORD, newspaper printed and
circulated in said county, three successive
weeks previous 10 said day of hearing.
A true cOpyl. john NJ. EVERpES
SEAL. SJO-4w Judge of Probate.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1895-07-12
News and Notes.

The electrical plow, which, it's claim
cd, may be operated at much less cost
than one propelled by steam, is lead
ing novelty in farm machinery.
Reports from horse breeding centers
in the west indicate that many large
brood mares have been sold, their own
ers being disguised with prevailing
prices. Rural New Yorker says electric
ity and the bicycle will never hurt the
business of tho large truck horse, and
those who keep their brood mares and
breed TO the best will be well repaid.
Breeders of scrub or misfit horses have a
worse prospect ahead than the exclusive
wheat growers.
The American cranberry is beginning
to make a reputation for itself both in
Great Britain and on the continent, fol-
lowing in the footsteps Of American
corn.
While the agricultural department
crop report makes the prices Of some Of
the crops higher, thcre is q decrease in
larger number, while in two great
stapios-wheat in the north and cotton
In tho south-thore is material. not ~
say disastrous. decrease
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1895-07-12
PETTlCCAT GOVERNMENT.
In Rome. Finland and Java Woman's Gu
prcmacy Is an Old Story.

II is only pbng people Of modern civil
liZatiOn that the supremacy of woman is
regarded as novelty. In Rome under the
empire there was singular institution
whore a tribunal Of women was establish
ed 20 decide questions regarding luxury
and etiquette The Emperor IIcliogabalus
consulted this assembly frequently. They
decided questions OF precedence the num-
her and state Of women at court, upon
the style If carriage the emperor should
ride In whether sedan chairs should be or
namcuted with silver or ivory and contest
I'd the rights of Wau with an Intelligence
worthy of TIE present time 1t was "a YER
I,ahlc senate of fashion, was approved Of
ty wiser men than llcliogabalus and was
Fc-Cstoai-hNi and maintained by his sue
ceasarS
Ills Qualon of woman's supremacy
docs lot always signify an advanced state
of society, a- viii Ice seen from the follow
Ing accoun, ot small! state in Java, be-
tNy.on the tavusuf ~amaraugand Batavia
known as iao Lineaom of Bantam. In re-
r.rd 10 It's form If government and tho
manners and customs of its inhabitants il
far ,EneeGs thcWild,st dreams of feminine
minds iU'm time iWmcmorial Bantam
though tibGiary to Holland has been
governed hY women Tho sovereign is "a
man, hat HAT is small matter as he
himself Is subject toa council Of three
women High Gieui;arics, officers, sol
dicrs and all thccourt attendants are with
out exception women who sec that the
men are cMpieytdiu agriculture and com
mcr,e Ihc kings bodyguard is composed
Of a corps of women soldiers who ride
nstridc thDir horses like men and handle a
short. sharp lance with dcXtcrity. They
carry rifle. too, with ease and aim and
fire with accuracy ah fun gallop. The old
est son of Oh" King succeeds to the crown
but il the king dles without malc heirs a
hundred women specially appointed meet
and select one Of their own sons by vote
and proclaim him the legitimate sovereign.
In several Villages 81 Finland the WON
an Ia, authority. for Il religious sect exists
there whose disciples arc forced when
about TO marry to take n VOW To submit to
the woman for their governing head, whose
duty il is 10 sec that the men behave
themselves and To- punish them if they
trau-rc,-s. similar are the purificants of
Liberia, who also rcco nize the supremacy
OF women. Detroit free Press
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1895-07-12

MORTGAGE SALE:-Default has been made
Nj iu the conditions OF a mortgage executed
hy solomon Wright and Mary l.. Wright. his
wife, 10 william II. Waldhy whereby the
power of sale in said mortgage contained has
become operative. eaid mortgage bears date
October 3l-t. 1851. and vas recorded NOvem-
her let, lssl I'm toe office of the register OF
deeds Tor the county OF GratiOt, state OF Mich
lEan, in lbcr 3j of mortgages, on page "A
One annual instailment OF interest on said
mortgage Is past due and yet remains unpaid.
More than thirty days have elapsed since sand
iustailmcnt Of interest became due and the
said mortgage exercising his option in said
mortgage contained. hereby declares the prin-
cipal sum thereof a. we'll rs all interest there
on, now due and payable. The amount
claimed a. due upon said mortgage at date
hereof r. the sum of seven hundred and
tWeuty-tOur dollars and seventy-three cents.
No proceedings have been instituted 10 col
lcct the same or any part thereof. either at law
or in equity. kOtlcc - hereby given that by
virtue Ot the power OF sale in said mortgage
contained and OF the statute In such case pro-
yidCd, the land and premises described in said
mort gage, tO-wit:
Tho southwest quarter Of the southwest
quarter of section twenty-nlne. in township
twelve north OF range three west, state OF
NJ Ichigan, will be sold AT public vendue TO the
highest bidder. AT the front door of the court
house i'm the village Of Ithaca, state Of Michi
gan. on the thirty first day Of August, 1895. at
one O clock ln the afternoon, 10 satisfy the
interest then accrued and the legal costs and
charges of this foreclosure. including an at
tOrncy fee OF twenty-five dollars as authorized
by Jaw
Dated june 9Th, 1885
WILLIAM II WALDEN,
c. J. WILLFTT. Mortgagee.
Attorney for MOrtgagee. Sis-l3w
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1895-07-12

A well known congressman, who had
been farmer before hcWcnt into politics,
was visiting his district, not long ago and
in bis rambic, DC saw "A man in stumpy
patch OF ground trying to get n. plow
through IT,
lie went over to him, and after a brief
salutation asked the privilege of making
n turn or two With the plow. The native
sLoo;. his head GJuhtfully as he looked at
his visitors store clothes and general air
Of elegant leisure, bat he let him take the
pillow The congressman sailed away with
it in 6Yc style and plowcd four orfiyc fur
rows before the owner Of the field could re-
cover from his surprise Then he pulled
up and handed the handles u the original
holder
by gravy, mister, said the farmer ad-
miringly, "air you in the agricultural
business
no, laughed the statesman.
You amt scllin plowsf'
"No
"Thcn what in thunder air you''
I'm the member of congress from this
district
Mir YOU the man voted for and that
I've been rcad.n about in the papers doin
legisla,in and SIGN IN Washin tom"
"Ncs
wei, by hockey, mister, - said the farm
er, % hc looked with admiration over the
recently ploved burrows, "cf I'd "a had
any idea That | was votin fer waste Of
SIGH good farmin material Id voted for
the other candidate as shore as shootinW
Youths Companion
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1895-07-12
THE ROCKET m WAR.
An Engine OF Destruction Which Inventors
Are Trying To Perfect.

The world was recently startled by tho
announcement that IA FrCnchman named
Turpiu had Invented am engine Of war $50
terrible that the nation possessing itwould
have the power Of annihiluting It's oppo-
ncnts-so dread a machine that its very
might would probably pat an end 20 war
altogether. The records Of the French
patent Office reveal the fact that this en-.
gine Of destruction, which should act as a
sort of cast iron Jupiter Tonans, IS a
rocket.
Inventors In all ages have been struck
with tho great advantages Of the rocket as
"a missile over the ordinary cannon with
It's proitctile First, the rocket carries its
propclling power with II while the pro.
joctile receives only big push, as il were,
at the beginning The cannon BAH must
move more and more slowly as il goes; the
rocket may go faster and faster. The can.
non ball implies an enormously heavy and
awkward piece of artillery; for setting OF
the rocket nothing is needed but u light,
portable frame or carriage
The first military rockets that made
much stir were those of COngrcyc, which
did good work IN the bombardmenU Of
Copenhagen and also in the Crimca.
But they did not always 90 straight
The inventors then tried 10 mako a rocket
which, like the brccchloadng rifle, should
cause its projcctile 90 rotate swiftly. 10 do
this and still keep the rocket I'm a straight
and even line IS a difficult problem
10 this end, instead ot providing a riflcd
cannon tube, TuIpn gives his rocket a
preliminary spin by the aid of electric mo-
tors He can thus evidently get up an
enormously high speed but it is unfortu-
natciy accompanied by % trembling move
mcnt, which has disturbing action On
the accuracy Of fire. 80 thcm.iitlry rocket
is still short Of perfection as an engine u
war, but Iurpin rocket has come nearer
10 it than any of lis prcdecessoES.-Ne w
York World
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1895-07-12

GHER1FF'S SALE:-Nutice IL hereby given,
- that by virtue of a writ OF feri facias,
issued out OF the circuit court for the county
OF GrHtiOt in favor Of the First National Bank
O. lOnia, Michigan, "a cOrpOraton) against the
goods and chattos and real estate of Simeon
Miller and Barton Miller in said county, to be
directed and delivered. | did on the third day
OF November, 4. D.. 1888. after being unable 10
find any property belonging TO them Jointly
within ,ho county of GratiOt, levy upon and
AXE all the right, title and interest of the said
Barton Miller in and TO the following real
estate. that is 20 say; the southwest quarter
n - of the northeast quarter "a and the
northwest quarter of the southeast quarter
"a of section twenty-three C23) in town eleven
ND north OF range four 90 west Gratiot
county. Michigan.
All OF which shall expose for sale at public
auction or Vendue. 10 the highest bidder, at
the north front door of the court house, in the
village OF Ithaca in said county of Gratiot
that being the place of holding the circuit
court for the SAID county OF Grauot) on Mon
day the third day Of June, \. D., 1895, at ten
O'Clock i'm the forenoon.
Dated this 18th day of April, a. D., 1895.
JOHN u. SPINNEY. JOHN GREIG,
Attorney. $40 Deputy sheriff
The above sale is adjourned until wednes
day, July 24th. 1898, at ten O'Clock in the fore
noon of that day AT the same place.
Dated Ithaca Mich, June Ord, 1895.
sis JOHN GREIG
Deputy Sheriff.