Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1895-04-25
STORIES ABOUT CHuROHITLs.
How Lord Randy Made a Dude Apollo,
gize Uncle larry and the Footman,

How Lord Randy Made a Dude Apollo
gize-uncle larry and the Footman,
Lord Randolph Churchill, when In
his best health and busy, useh 70 as.
tonish most other Englishmeu by his
Indifference to sport" as Il means of
getting rid of his occasional lapses OF
leisure, says Kate Fields Washington
He once said that he knew Of two
ways OF spending a holiday infinitely
preferable to going to Scotland for the
shooting. One was to go to Paris and
live a month or so on the boulevardsi
the other was to run down to Brighton
and stay in bed twenty hours out OF
the twenty-four. His ideal of happy
life was to 20 to bed In a quiet room.
stay there during the day reading and
DOING, dine in slippers and dressing
gown in the evening, and as soon MS
convenient thereafter 20 back to bed.
Such liking as he had for society was
of the unconventional sort. He never
took n very keen artistic delight In his
wife's musical accomplishments, hut
he was unwilling that anyone else
should speak dispamgingly of them.
At an entertainment once, where she
had consented to execute a brilliant
dash on the piano, tall youth with
bangs and monocle was observed
paying a languid and rather insolent
attention to the music, standing close
enough to the performer 40 have his
comments easily overheard by her
Lord Randy" was close at hand, too
remark: "Deuced fine music YOU
know, but 1t lacks veal soul lit lacks
veal soul" To the critics aStonish
ment n muscular young man. with a
big mustachc. whom he had not no.
ticcd before, whispered In his ear,
"For shilling I'd wallop the life out
of you" He FASTENED to withdraw
but without discovering the Identify
of the author of the menace The next
day. to his delight, he received an In.
yiratIon to the Churchill's home. OF
course he accepted with avidity. ON
entering the house he was met by his
threatening neighbor of the night be-
fore, who. he ut once dlscerned, must
be Lord Randolph. He proceeded no
further than the entrance hall, for
Churchill bcckoned in the direction of
the dra wing room, and cut doated
Lady Churchill This fellow has
come to apologize to you for his re-
marks of last night" Kissed Lord Ran
dolph. "Now." to the stranger, down
on your knees!9 Down went the
dandy, lisping out the most abject plea
for forgiveness. Then he was turned
over TO footman to be put ignomin-
lously out Of the door, while the host
followed his retreating figure with a
roar OF derisiye laughter.
They used TO tell story in the New
York clubs about the first visit paid
Lady Churchill by her uncle Lawrence
Jerome, after her marriage. | believe
Mr.. Jerome originally told II Of him
self, He modestly approached the
portals Of the Churchill town house,
and accosted choice edition Of
Jeames Yellowplush"
rs Mr.. Churchill at homer"
The footman shlvers. me lud Is In
Ireland"
"Humph! What's he doing In Ire
landf" The footman Is frozen into ST.
lence with horror
Mr. Jerome tries again. as Mrs.
Churchill at home:"
The footman quivers with suppressed
Indignation. "Me Teddy is not down
stairs yet"
Not down stairs? In bed at this
time Of day? Does she know what
o'clock II is? Here's pretty how
de-dol Well, you 60 up and tell Mrs.
Churchill"
The footman, growing every mo.
ment more desperate. here turns
deadly pale and clears his throat
neryously, being about to call aloud
and summon assistance to eject this
audacious intruder when a silvery
voice, with musical laugh
behind II, is heard over the bannisters
from the second story hall: "Oh, that's
you Uncle Larry, isn't It? Come
right inT
The footman writhes In an anguish
of self-abasement at once, bowling low
and reteating. "Oh, sir, Oh, me ludl
Pardon mel II You please, me lud,
this way this wayl''
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