St. Landry clarion. (Opelousas, La.) 1890-1921, 1895-07-20
PuNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

-She-"You mustn't forget that we
are engaged" He-.tThere's no dam
ger. haven't paid for the ring yet -
Life.
-Father-'So you wish to make my
daughter your wife?" Sui6or-'tWell,
it's the only way can see of becom-
ing your son-in-law. .n-Tit-Bits
Have you ever visited the cham
Der of horrors at the museum2" She
mo; but ] have seen the posters for
several magazines. Inter Ocean.
| Mr.. Commonstock '.But is the
count gifted with common sense?''
Daughter Indignantly --''I should
hope not, papa. He's noble.nan. -
| Boston Post.
Are there any more jurymen who
have a prejudice against you?" in
| quired the lawyer. mo, sab, de jury
am all right, but want to challenge
the judge. ."--Green Bag.
--'Slimson is in fair way Of MAX
/ ing fortune" what atp' 'sHe in
vented a eontrivance by which two
people can make love while riding
their wheels. - Brooklyn Life.
Bills Little Jest.-''There is some
thing about you," remarked Rubber
neck Bill, as he gently removed the
travellers money belt, "there is some
thing about you that lii }. Indian
apolis Journal
-''Oh, how delightful!'' exclaimed
the artless young creature at the re-
ception. You are an authoress!" 81
presume, " replied the Boston celebrity,
with cold smile, II am what You
would call novelistess. " - Chicago
Tribune
-Hoax-''I told him q whopping big
lie to square myself" Joax-.'Did it
make an impression on him2" Hoax
mot exactly; it simply strengthened
the impression he had already formed
of me. "-P Philadel phia Record
II hear" said the Cheerful Idiot,
shat they are talking OF revising the
costume of the Goddess of Liberty" I"
"And what win it be, pray?" asked the
typewriter boarder, who has wheel.
RED, white and boomers q said the
Cheerful Idiot. indianapolis Journal
What Is the use OF seeking wealth,
Destroying soul and brain,
Since folks declare who have been there
IL nothing gives but painP
But Rhi the secret here we greet;
~ Is the kind OF pain that's sweet.
Boston Courier.
The burglar turned with sneer
of malignant triumph IF you shoot
me, he Missed, youth wake the baby
There was nothing to do but permit
him to load all the silver into a sack
and carry 1t away, leaving the front
door open behind him. Detroit Trib-
une.
1T Is said there is language of the
hair. We see no reason to doubt this
assertion. At any rate we have heard
Single bfonsde' III IA Kaf so Oh asrg coat q cot
lar has talked palmer than a guide
post and furnished material for whole
course of lectures. Truth.
Now, sir" said the professor OF
medicine, s'you may tell me to what
class of rnaladies insomnia belongs"
"Why-er" replied the indolent youth.
''its a contagious disease 2 II never
heard 1t so described. Where did you
learn of this?' From experience.
Whenever my neighbor's dog can't
sleep, I'm just as wakefnl as he is. -
Washington Star.
She had now become desperate.
''Your family has a grand name, /" he
observed. i would prefer almost
any other" she reioined with a
svficient TO suggest that
she had given the subject thought.
After a time she sat as one in a trance
and wondered what would be the
chances of his tumbling il wheat
elevator were toprecipitate itself upon
aim. Detroit Tribune.