The Topeka state journal. [volume] (Topeka, Kansas) 1892-1980, 1895-10-14


sofa, and with his hands in his pockets be-
gan to criticise my pictures. 1 am used to
having my daubs admired tool who
have been hitherto the only artist of Belle
vile.
We talked, of course. Most of the con-
versation I forget. 1 remember, however,
this part of it: He spoke of having once
taught drawing to some boarding school
girls.
''They had talent, many of them,'' he
said, "but, you see, a girl seldom studies
hard; she does not look forward to follow
ing a profession, but to marrying some
day. She passes the time before that epoch
that is all. After that she hangs her
productions on the wall and says, I paint
ed those when was at school :"
''Sone women have their own way to
make, - L said, land a profession is such
o blessing. If one is successful in it, it
does away with all necessity for marrying.
A woman who can earn her own living
will not relinquish her liberty that some
one may earn it for her.
''Do you know, Miss Sterling, that
somehow your distance in this sketch looks
nearer than your foreground? And your
shadows lie two different ways, and the
gentleman coming up the road is some
thing like 90 feet in height!''
''Thank you," 1 said, turning red, I
suppose, for L burned from brow to chin.
F'Not at all, - he answered 81 always
like to give beginner advice. Good day.
Oh, by tho way, have 1 given you card?
Drop in at my studio when you come to
New York. That's the number. Mean
while I shall now and then see you whilo
I stay
He was gone. Impudent brutei Who
asked him to "drop imp How dare he
ridicule my pictures! No doubt all he
says is true, but he would not have said it
to a pretty woman. He will never guess
that pine for love and loves caresses. He
will never for one moment imagine that
could have loved him.
May 20.-How mistaken have been in
this man! How can one have such a face
and be so contemptible-to work so to IN
derInine poor girl? That day 1 had pu-
pills and orders enough to make me feel
rich. But he has got them all away. Why
could he not have gone back to the city
and have painted his pictures for the acad-
envy and made the fortune that he might?
I have nothing now but my savings. The
folk hereabout have learned that I am q
nero dauber.
No matter. I will pack my trunk and
go somewhere. 1 cannot bear it. He comes
to see me almost every day; he still amuses
| himself with me so absurdly. Why does
| he haunt me So whom I-yes, I hate him
| Oct. $50 much has happened since [
! jotted down those last words that | do not
| know where to begin or how. Let mo
| think. All, it shall be when 1 answered
that advertisement and promised to be-
come governess to the Smith children at
Willow Heights. 1 was going out to buy a
new hat at the milliners when Mehlig
stopped at my door.
sGoing out?'' he asked. ''Ah, well,
only stopped moment. 1 w"nt you to be
in tomorrow night. L have something
very particular to say to you. Stay in,
won't you?"
1 neither aSsented nor refused. l hated
him as woman can only hate man she
might have loved. bought my hat in the
| village. I went home again. But he did
not como to sec me that evening. The
| next day went away; taught the Smith
children six weeks and then went to New
York where L managed to live by coloring
photographs. My ambition was gone. 1
| painted no more. L resolved that l had
been fool to paint at all.
A week ago I went out to take an even
/ ing walk Just at dark. l saw against 4
door glittering plate that caught my
eye, for on it were the words Mehlig,
artist
I ought to have hurried away, but L
stood motionless instead, staring at the
letters And as 1 stared the door opened,
and a gentleman, with his right sleeve
S1IBly " Ills DtCetSls Gthl14O OAAb 6hLIu
stood before it-stood quietly moment,
then, knecling down, began, awkwardiy
enough, with his one left hand, to take
the plato down. I gave little cry. He
heard me and turned.
Mamie Sterlingi'' he said and came
toward me. 1 waited for him, and bitter
renorse stole into my heart, for 1 had
prayed that he might be punished, and it
seemed as though had been answered.
hnlia.-a did m t-notxr no caia
CHANGING down at his empty sleeve. "You
look astOnished. I'll walk with you. I'm
glad I've met you. You know l did not
keep my appointment that evening. That
| loose sleeved coat OF mine was the cause.
The machinery caught it and drew me in.
! I shall never finish those pictures of the
Rapids or any others. You saw me taking
down that sign of mine, eh? 1 haven {
had tho heart before"
Suddenly he looked down into my eyes
and spoke
Mamie, do you know what I did to
you? l robbed you of your scholars and
your orders on purpose. You have thought
it chance; it was not.
''You told me that as long as a woman
had profession and could live by it she
would not marry. You said you judged
by yourself And 1 wanted you to marry,
Nannie-tO marry me.
II wanted You to feel helpless and de-
pendent SO that my suit might prosper. I
should have asked you how you liked me
that night, but it was not TO be, you see.
81 hurt your pride, and you paint very
well, you know. did it all to humble
you down to the clinging point. You see
the end. Will you forgive me?''
II never guessed that you cared for
me, - almost sobbed. 81 thought you
hated me''
Hated you?''
Eyes. You praised beauty so, and I
r.
.il f'You are beautiful to me- You always
have been, you always will be. shall re-
member you as the one woman 1 loved