davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
ACUTE DYSPEPSIA.
SYMPATHETIC HEART DISEASE
OFTEN ATTENDS 1T.
The Modern Treatms-. Consists In Re-
moving rne Cause.

From Cedar Rapids. Iowa, Republican
Mrs. v. Curley who has resided In
Clarence. Iowa, for the past twenty
two years, tells an interesting story of
what she considers rescue from prema-
ture death. Her narrative follows:
For ten years prior to 1894, I was
constant sufferer from acute stomach
trouble. had all the manifold symp-
toms of acute dyspepsia, and at times
other troubles We're present in compile
cation--I did not know what 1t was to
enjoy meal. No matter how careful
/ might be as to the quality quantity
and preparation Of my food, distress
always followed eating. / was despon-
dent and blue. Almost to the point Of
insanity at times, and would have
been glad to die Often and often I
could not sleep. sympathetic heart
trouble set in and time and again
was obliged to call a doctor in the night
to relieve sudden attacks of suffoca-
ton which would come on without a
moments warning.
My troubles increased as time wore
on and | spent large sums in doctor
bills, being compelled to have medical
attendants almost constantly. During
1892 and 1888, it was impossible for me
to retain food, and water brashes
plagued me. / was reduced to a skele-
ton. A consultation of physicians was
unable to determine just what did all
me. The doctors gave us as their opin-
ion that the probable trouble was uI-
ceration of the coats of the stomach
and held out no hope of recovery. One
doctor said, "All I can do to relieve
your suffering Is by the use of opium
About this time q friend of mine,
Mrs. SAMANTHA Smith of Glidden,
Iowa, told me about the case Of Mrs.
Thurston Of Oxford Junction, Iowa.
This lady said she had been afflicted
much the same as had. She had con-
suited local physicians without relief,
and had gone to Davenport for treat
ment. Giving up all hope Of recovery,
she was persuaded by a friend to take
DR.. Williams Pink Pills: The result
was almost magical.
I was led to try them from her ex-
perience, and before many months I
years. I am now almost free from
trouble, and il through some error of
diet feel badly, this splendid remedy
sets me right again. have regained
my strength and am once more in my
usual flesh. I sleep well and can eat
without distress. I have no doubt that
owe my recovery to DR.. Williams
Pink Pills.
DIR. Williams Pink Pills contain all
the elements necessary to give new life
and richness to the blood and restore
shattered nerves. They are for sale by
all druggists, or may be had by mail
from DR.. Williams Medicine Company.
$2.50)-by addressing DR.. Williams
six boxes for $3.50.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
Brought Down Abra hs IN.

Dupin the elder, who presided over
the chamber of deputies up to the
coup d'etat, disliked a prosy, long
winded speaker. One of his bugbears
was deputy of the center, with the
name of Abraham Dubois. One day,
Dubois had occupied the rostrum for
more than an hour, and his speech
was not half finished. Suddenly Du-
pin rang his bell and got up. ''Abra-
ham, Abraham" he exclaimed in a
sepulchral tone-'.Abraham, Abra-
ham, the hour for the sacrifice has
struck" The poor speaker did not
protest, but Immediately vacated the
rostrum. -Argonaut.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
How Man Became Colonel on Short Service.

Col. Ike Hill, Of Licking county,
without doubt one of the greatest of
national characters, was in the city a
few days ago. To number of old
friends, who braved the terrors of
war, he related how he came by the
title of colonel.
II served in the army one consecu-
tive night" said Ike ct was the
Army of the Potomac, and it was near
Alexandria when | found them. I was
on my way there, and on the train,
not far from Alexandria, met an old
friend who was an officer in that army.
| was then a great short-card player,
and he knew it. He invited me to go
down to camp, telling me | could win
barrel of money. Well, | went.
cit was long toward evening, and
that night we had a game of poker.
Why, | won at least So, 900, breaking
them all. One of the crowd of officers
was sore loser, and when he had
staked and lost his last cent he pull
ed his revolver and made me throw
up my hands. Then they took every
cent had and turned me over from
one guard to another until I landed in
the bull pen at Alexandria. | was
dressed fit to kill, and one of those
devils took a knife, running it up the
back of my Prince Albert Sitting it
to the neck. My patent leather shoes
were all burst from walking and | was
almost dead, besides being busted.
/ succeeded in getting out of the
prison and over to Washington, where
Mrs. Sunset Cox loaned me $25 in
gold"
Z" WAS that all OF your war expert
ence?" asked one Of the party.
THAT was all. Capt. Owens once
asked me. in a very surprised way,
whether | had thrown up my hands
when they told me to. | said / did.
q Well, | wouldn't have done it,
he said.
Z" No, you would have whipped the
army. l couldn't. Cincinnati En-
quirer.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
A California Curiosity.

A crustacean curiosity of much in
terest has just been added to the state
museum of California. It's scientific
name is Bireo Latis, the robber crab.
1t is q land crab and lives by climbing
cocoanut trees, from which it gathers
the fruit, crack ing the same and eating
its fruit. 1t is very handsome in APP
pearance, with strong claws, and looks
like cross between a crab and lob
ster. This specimen was brought
from the flaming islands, on the other
side of the equator. Two Of them w ere
brought, but one has since died.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
A Wonderful African Mimic.

DR.. Moffatt, the distinguished mis-.
sionary and father-in-lav of D. Liv-
ingstone, once preached a long sermon
to a tribe in the interior of Africa.
Shortly after he had finished he saw
that the crowds were gathering around
very common looking young savage.
To his surprise, however, the lad
mounted a stone and repeated every
word of the sermon that had just been
finished. Not only was the reproduce
ton precise as to words, but the ges-
lures and infections which the white
man had used were put in at the right
place with surprising exactness.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
Why! HOrrfbIet

" Did We ever hear of desc priests in
India said Reginald de Bumme, dat
sticks needles through dere cheeks an
burns dere skin jes fur fun?'
dat amt nothin," replied Clarence
Fitz Hautbean. II knowed a man dat
tuck a bath every day cause he said he
liked itr'
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
Important Legal Poiut.

"You wish to see mep" said the law
yer as the living skeleton from the
dime museum approached.
Eyes, sir. I want your advice on
an important point
$50 on
II am in love with the two-headeu
girl. If | marry her can l be prose-
cuted for bigamy?"-
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
A Woman Still.

"Turn back" pleaded the maiden,
80, Time, in thy flight, and make me
young again. just for tonight"
Certainly" rejoined Time, affably.
"About how far shall turn back?"
''None of your business"
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
The Evolution

The Evolution
OF medicinal agents is gradually RELOCATING
the old-time herbs, pills, draughts and
vegetable extracts to the rear and br1n g1ng
into general use the pleasant and effective
liquid laxative, Syrup Of Figs. To get the
true remedy see that it is manufactured by
the California Fig Syrup Co. only. For
sale by all leading druggists.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

Bicycles will be used the coming season
more generally than ever before, especially
as they have been greatly reduced in price.
The Chicago Scale Co. are leaders for low
prices on the best Wheels, as well as many
other articles, and all kinds Of Scales.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
There Was a Difference.

Conductor-That's Canadian coin, sir;
[ can't take it!
Passenger--The deuce you can't! You
gave it to me this morning.
Conductor-Well, you see, Pm more
particular thanyou are.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
Save Her Feelings.

The maitre de ballet confessed himself
puzzled.
There's an old skate out here who wants
to be living picture,'' he said. Glow
shall get rid of her?''
The manager, who had originated many
of the brightest ideas in the business,
lighted cigar.
'.1'ell ber.n he reJoined. chat we do not
belong to the impressionist school.n
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
Identification Made Easy.

IueHuILICitIUH VHHu6 EaBys
~ didn't know that that very CONVEX
sational gentleman was foreigner until a
few minutes ago."
ibid he tell you so9''
''No. Igathered it from his conversation.
He knows SO many ways in which the
institutions of this country could be
improved"
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

The late king of the New England
Gypsies, who was buried the other day,
left an estate valued at 100000.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

Piso's Cure for Consumption has no equal
as Cough mediciue-F. NJ ABBOTT, 1888
Seneca ST., Buffalo, N. Y, May 0, 1894
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

Look your difficulties in the face with a
brave heart, and they will soon begin to
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

The man who robs the poor would steal
gold from the streets of heaven, if he
could.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

IA Cup OF Parks Tea at night move
the bowels In the morning."
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

It is said that Mrs. Ingalls,, wife of ex-
Senator Ingalls,, is the best cook In Atch-
ison. Kansas.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

There are other books that tell man to
give up some sin, but the Bible is the only
one that commands him to give up all sin.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

"Hanson's Magic Corn Sa1ve."
Warranted to cure money refunded. Ask your
druggist for it. Price 15 cents
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

Clipping tigers claws will make him
harmless, perhaps, but it does not destroy
his taste for blood
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

The Christian should do cheerfully what
the wording cannot do without signing
and groanlng.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

IF the Baby is Cutting Teeth
Be sure and use that old and weltried remedy, Mrs
MINsLow,s SOOTHING SYRUP for Children Teething.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
H. and H.

Will clean silks. wooden goods, ribbons. curtains
and carpets. Unegualled for cleaning house,
killing moths and renovating grease spots. Price
15c, 2 cakes for 25c. Address H. and H. Des Moines.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

The devil is not losing any sleep on
account of the man who thinks money can
make him happy
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

A man may be es honest as the day is
long, and still do a great deal Of mischief
during the night.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

Goes Cough BaIsam
Is the Oldest and best. 1t will break up Cold quick.
err than anything else. IL is always reliable Try it.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05
FACTS AND EVENTS.

Peruvian guano was first brought to
this country in 1882.
Postage stamps are gummed by a
starch paste made from potatoes.
1t is said that whales can remain
under the surface of the ocean for an
hour and half.
The remarkable statement is made
that during the last 1o1 years France
has lost 5000, 900 soldiers in war.
A Baltimore fruit grower claims to
have an apple tree, every apple OF
which is sweet on one side and sour
on the other.
A machine has been invented, and
is now in use in the Philadelphia
mint, which will count 1000 silver
dollars minute.
The first advertisement published in
the Baltimore American was the sale
of piece of land by General George
Washington in 1773.
STATE OF ONO, CRY OF TOLEDO, 80
LUCAS COUNTY. 90
FRANK j. CHENEY makes oath that he 1,
the senior partner of the firm of F. J. CHE
NEY & Co., doing business in the City OF
Toledo. County and State aforesaid, and
that said firm will pay the sum Of ONE
HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and everv
case OF CATARRH that can not be cured by
the use Of HALLS CATARRH CURE.
FRANK J. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in nv
presence this 9th day Of December, A. D.
1885.
- A. w. GLEASON,
' Notary Public.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally and
acts directly on the blood and mucous sur
faces of the system. Send for testimonials,
free. F. -. CHENEY & CO.,
Toledo, 9.
eY Sold by Druggists, 75c.
Halls Family Pills, 25c.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

People who borrow trouble have to pay
big interest.
Iowa state bystander. [volume] (Des Moines, Iowa) 1894-1916, 1895-04-05

e5y Sold by Druggists, 75c.
Halls Family Pills, 25c.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
THE END NOT VET.

several Other Parts Of tho Income Tax
s s.3E ..5 II Law WAL he Attacked.
w AsH1NaToN, April 10. Since the
delivery Of the income tax decision, at
torneys and others Interested in over
throwing the tax, have been taking
steps to test various parts of the law in
further proceedings. i" Attacks will be
made both on those portions that were
sustained by tie vote and on some
fresh points not passed upon in the par
ticular cases decided Attorney j. M.
Wilson, of Shellabarger & Wilson, who
represented John G.. Moore in the court
of appeals in the recent cases, said that
further proceedings would be taken i'm
mediately.
Z Several parts of the law will be at
tackled" said he, "the principal one be-
ing the exemption from taxation OF in.
comes under 81, 900 annually. This will
be attacked as an unjust discrimination.
I cannot say just yet who the complain
ants or the title of the suits will be, but
they will be instituted soon, probably in
in very few days. and. be pushed as
rapidlv as possible.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
SETTLERS MUST GO.

sauatters Will Re Removed From the
Yankton Reserve.
WASHINGTON, April 10:-Secretary
Smith took up the protests of the Yank-
ton Indians against allowing the State
of South Dakota to select school lands
within the coded reservation. The Sec
rotary decided to recommend to the
president, who has the proclamation
declaring the lands open yet unsigned,
to temporarily withhold his signature.
He will allow the state two weeks
within which to file arguments show
ing it's rights to select these lands, and
thereafter will render his decision. 1t
is probable that in the meantime he
will take some steps to have squatters
removed from the reservation, task
that may require the use of United
States troops.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
An Anecdote Of Shelley.

The poet Shelley tells an amusing
story Of the influence that language
"hard to be understood" exercises on
the vulgar mind. Walking near Covent
Garden, London, he accidentally jostled
against an Irish NAVY, who, being in a
quarrelsome mood, seemed inclined to
attack the poet. A crowd Of ragged SYM
pathizers began to gather, when Shell.
ley, calmly facing them. deliberately
pronounced: s.# ..l,~ IL.
II have put my hand into the ham
per. I have looked on the sacred barley.
I have eaten out of the drum. have
drunk and am we'll pleased. have said
Knox Ompax, and it is Finished
The effect was magical. The aston
ished Irishman fell back. His friends
began to question him. "What bar
ley?" where's the hamper?'' "What
have you bcen drinking?" and Shelley
walked away unmolested.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
Through Service.

The Nickle Plate Road, IN Y G &
St L R r. the favorite line between
Chicago and the East along the
South Shore of Lake Erie. being the
shortest line to Cleveland and Buffa-
10, offers splendid through car SER
vice to all classes of passengers.
Magnificent Wagner Sleepers and
Dining Car daily on through trains
to New York and Boston. For res
fervations of sleeping car space and
urther informal ion address, j. \.
Callahan, General Agent, lS9 Clark
Street, Chicago, III. 34w4
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
Their Scales Not Sealed.

HILLS, MINI, April l0.-tOne law on
the statute books the Hills merchants
would like to see repealed is the act pro-
yiding lot the sealing OF weights and
measures. A few days ago suit was
commenced by various merchants
against several parties for store &C
counts, and they were very much sur
prised when the defense set up the
claim that the scales did not bear the
state seal and they were therefore not
liable. There is not q sealed scale or
measure in the CITY. ~.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
COLONISTS WERE PRUDENT.

And1anans TOOK Precautions to Get Infor-
nation Before Going to Guatemala.
INDIANAPOLIS, April 10.-Recent ar
ticles printed in the newspapers, telling
of profitable fields in Guatemala for
American emigrants induced the for
nation of an Indianapolis colony,
whose purpose was to emigrate to that
country. This colony was to consist of
$50 men. Among the members was J.
Conrad Bray, who wrote to P. M. B.
Young, the American minister at Guate-
mala, asking tor information regarding
the fattering inducements that have
been offered to emigrants.
Minister Young writes that the coun-
try holds but poor Inducements to emf
grants. The proposed colony will be
abandoned.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
MORTGAGE STATISTICAL !
Comptlation Showing the Condition OF
1 American Farms and HOmes.

,Compilation Showing the Condition OF
\ 1:% American Farms and Homes.
7 WASHINGTON, April 1O.-The COM
pilation Of farms, homes and mortgage
statistics made by the last census is in
teresting in view Of the decision Of the
supreme court These statistics do not,
however, give details concerning rents
paid. A summary Of the statistics
shows: = TX T2s 49,. ,.T.
There are IL, $50, 152 families in tho
United States, and Of these families 90
per cent hire their farms or homes and
48 per cent own them, while % per cent
of the owning families own subject to
incumbrance and ~ per cent own
Free of Incumbrance.
On the owned farms and homes there
are liens amounting to $2,lY2, 949, 569,
which is 81 per cent of the value of the
incumbered farms and homes, and this
list bears interest at the average rate of
6.65 per cent. Each owned and mourn
bored farm or home, on the average, is
worth $s,352, and is subject to a debt Of
$1,257. In regard to the families occu-
plying farms, the conclusion is that "a
per cent Of the families hire and &c per
cent owned the farms cultivated by
them; that % per cent Of the owning
families, ~ ....... -
Own Subject to Inoumbrance, -,
and 70 per cent own free OF incum-
brance. Among 100 farm families on
the average "a per cent hire the farms,
10 per cent own their farms with in
cumbrance and AZ per cent without in
cum brance. On the owned farms
there are liens amounting to $1,OS5,.
995, $50, which is IS per cent Of the
value of the incumbered farms, and
this debt bears interest at the average
rate of 10Y per cent. Each owned and
incumbered farm, on the average, is
worth $s,444, and is subject to debt
of Al 924
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
MADE BOGUS STAMPS
Large Number Of .Counterfeit
Twos Have Ddne Duty
,s@, on Letters. r.
The FRAUD JUST DISCOVERED
Spurious Stamps Manufac-
tured in Chicago and Sent to
X Various Points. e 4 +

CHICAGO, April 10.-United States
secret service officials in Chicago and
Washington have unearthed probably
the most unique and at the same time
J. the most important swindle ever perpe-
trated upon any government. Its mag
nitude. after two days investigation,
can only be guessed at, but it is believed
thousands upon thousands of dollars
have been secured by q gang Of skilled
counterfeiters. who have reproduced
with wonderful skill and accuracy the
pink two cent stamp Of commerce. =;
: It is thought the country is flooded
from New York to San Francisco with
these spurious stamps, and the United
States has been carrying millions OF
letters from which not one cent of reve-
nue. was received. e4|
Chicago, apparently, has been the
Headquarters of the gang, and its prod
uct has been shipped to distributing
agents through the express companies.
Just how the information reached the
government officials is not known. But
they evidently got a straight tip, for
last evening Captain Stuart of the
postal inspectors department. and Cap
tain Porter of the United States secret
service bureau called at the Wells
Fargo Office. They were taken to the
store room and there found an oblong
package, looking like a roll of music.
it contained 10000 of the counterfeit
stamps.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1895-04-11
OF LITTLE PROFIT.
Counterfeiting of Stamps Attended With
Difficulties.

Counterfeiting of Stamps Attended With
Difficulties.
WASHINGTON, April 10.-Chief In
5spector Wheeler Of the postofice depart
ment refuses to say anything about the
stamp counterfeiting in Chicago though
he has received several kilograms con-
corning the affair: 1T was learned,
however, through other officials, that
the extent of the counterfeiting has
been overestimated. Third Assistant
Postmaster General Craig says that
counterfeit stamps have carried letters
through the mails and have been can
celled, but says that stamp counterfeit
ing cannot be carried on to any great
extent, as the cost of making stamps
and the difficulty in disposing Of them
is Is great as toErender the counteaeit-
ing Of little profit.