davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
An old shippers Yarn.

Down on the Battery the other day
they We're talking about a schooner that
had been struck by lightning, when the
reporter singled out an old mariner and
said:
Captain H, it seems to me I've
read or heard of your being struck -
Yes. she was, answered the old
yarn-spinner.
Where was it?"
"On Point Aux Barques. about fifteen
years ago. Very strange case that
Probably the only one of the kind ever
heard Of"
Give us the particulars"
We'll. we were jogging along down
when thunderstorm overlook us. and
the first flash of lightning struck the
Geek amidships and bored a hole as
big as my leg right down through the
bottom.
And she foundered, Of course"
NO. sir The water began rushing
In, and she would have foundered but
there came a second flash and a bolt
struck my fore topgallant mast. 1t was
cut off near the top, turned bottom end
up, and as it came down it entered
the hole and plugged it up as tight
as a drum. When we got down to dry
dock we simply sawed off either end and
left the plug in the planks "-Texas
Siftings.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
who're He Saw II.

Mr. Haysecd- Marier I've made up
my mind ter send our boy TO the city
writing school 10 learn how to write.
Mrs. Hayseed-He writes good
hand.
YES, Marier. but he's too slow for
these times The city's the place to
learn things, Marier. no matter what.
They write like creased lightnin'
there. Why, Marier. white | was in
the city saw man write Il two-page
love letter in seventeen seconds by
the watch He was regular city
fcuer. tool could tell by his clothes.
Why, Marier when the girl that letter
was writ TO got it. i took her most
i've minutes to read t. / timed her,
toe
Love lettsr-gir! reading it, Why.
where and how en- 'arsh did YOU see :
letter written. and then
"oh, its all SO, Mar.er. I saw it III
theater."
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

She took him up so gently,
And with such a charming air,
His china soul was melted quite.
And loved her to despair.
All day he sat and thought of her,
Until The twilight cane,
And in his china dreams at night
He breathed her little name.
One day, whilst being busted,
In his joy he trembled so.
To feel her little fingers, that,
Alas! she let him go.
In vain she tried to grab him back,
Fate willed it they should part;
He fell against the fender edge
And broke his little heart
She gathered up his fragments,
And she told a little lie.
Expounding to her mistress how
The cat had made him die
And on the following morning. wher
The shutters back she thrust,
She spoke his little epitaph-
There's one thing less TO dust"
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

Mammal" said Tommy McSwilligen
in his earnest manner.
We'll Tommy"
Did papa create moths -
NOW what on earth put such a pre-
9osterous idea as that in your mind ~
But. mamma, amt moths the little
flies that get in your furs ?"
Yes. but what has that TO do with
your papas creating them?"
why. l heard you tell Mrs. Squildig
that when papa heard how much your
new dress cost he made the fur fly
Cleveland Plaindealer
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

forerunner of nervous prostration,
with all the horrible suffering that
term implies. That Tired Feeling and
nervousness are sure indications of an
impure and impoverished condition of
the blood. The craving of the system
for help can only be met by purifying
tie blood. Hoods Sarsaparilla is the
one great blood purifier. 1t expels all
impurities, gives vitality and strength,
regulates the digestion and makes the
weak strong.
:" In the spring I felt very much run
down--no strength or appetite. / began to
take Hoods Sarsaparilla and my appetite
improved and did not have that tired feel
ing II. r. SQUIREs, East Leyerett Mass.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

sam Johnsing- yer lubly darter
Matildy made her deboo?
Mrs. Crow-Not yet. Mr.. Johnsing.
Oats a great pity Sich q lubly
flower was not born ter blush unseen
and waste her fragrance on de desert
ar
she can't blush ans odder way 'ccpt
unseen, she am So dark Completed.
but her sister Mollie am several shades
lighter. You can see her blush almost
cherry day. Elk
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
Logical Tommy

Mother-If you are not good. Tommy.
papa won't kiss YOU any more.
Tommy-Yes, papa will kiss me II I'm
rot good. You said the cook was no
good and papa kissed her when you
were away yesterday.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
ONLY ONE AND THAT IN JULY.
Excursion 70 Colorado

The Great Rock Island Route will sell tickets
cheap for this excursion 10 Denver in July, and
you should post yourself at once as to rates
and routes
Send by postal card or letter 10 Jno Sebas-
tian, &. T. A. Chicago for beautiful souvenir
issued by the Chicago. Rock Island & Pacific
Ry, called the Tourist Teacher, that tells all
about the trip. IL will be sent free II is a
gem, and you should rot delay in asking for it.
JNO SEBASTIAN @. p A, chicago
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
A Dangerous PLAYER.

Jack Potts-I should not care to play
poker with Cheiro.
Luke Pleasant--Why not2
Jack Potts-He knows too much about
hands.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

EVERY narrowing SOW should have
shelter to herself and be put in in
time to get acquainted with her sur
rouudings
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
Removal of Ticket ONCE of the New
York, Chicago a. st. Louis Rail-
road-(NickeI Plate Road

On May LIST the Chicago citv ticket
Office of the New York. Chicago 4. ST.
Louis r. r. nickel Plate Road will be
moved to III Adams street. opposite the
post office. ]. Y. Callahan
General Agent
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

Our parrot is dead wrote a little
girl. and a poll seems to have settled
over the family. '-Exchange
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
ra.hlonahle rhllsathrnnr.

Englishman--W Why is It you Hamari-
cans copy the Hinglish2
American--We are III hopes vo1.
Englishmen win see how it looks. and
get disguised with yourselves.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

When lightning strikes it admits of
no NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS.
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

They are getting up a subscription
for the benefit of the poor-how much
Will you SUBSCRIBE" asked Russell
Gage of Pe te Amsterdam.
Just as much as you do"
"Oh. you are a hard-hearted wretch"'
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09

"Isnson's Magic Corn SaI-a"
warranted 70 cure money refunded. ask your
druggist for it. Price cents
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
OUR WIT AND HUMOR.
CURRENT SAYINGS AND DO
INGS OF FUNNY FOLK.
''Ther's One Thing Less TO Dust"-A
Hard Hearted MiIIionaire-Foree of
Habit illustrated in a Church-FIotsam
nd Jetsam from the Tide.

LITTLE CHINA
figure
On a little brack-
ct sat,
His little feet were
always crossed,
He " IRE a little
hat.
And every morn
ing. fair or foul,
In shine or sha-
dows dim,
A pretty little
Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1895-05-09
Our Liquor Bill.

The liquor bill'' of this country, at
the price paid dram shops. is estimated
at from s474 600, goo up. of which large
part is worse than waste.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
Pointed Real Estate Conuuussms.

10 the EdHjtbPpof tie World:
Your editorial ''High-Priced Real
Estate" stating that "a ground rent
of 81 1000 a year is being paid for a SKI
foot space in the Grand Central de-
pot leads me to ask a few ques-
tons.
AS values created by individuals be.
long of right to such individuals, dc
not values created by the presence OF
the community belong of right to the
community? And should not such
values be taken by the community
to pay the expenses of the comnau-
nifty?
If so, the tax on that 5x7-foot space
would be 81, 1000 a year, with no tax on
anything else. Wouldn't that method
of raising revenue compel the holders
OF valuable ground rents to put them
to their best possible use?
Wouldn't it prevent the ..iistence OF
that disgraceful eyesore, that burned
out structure on Union square adjoin'
ing Tiffany's, and compel thu erection
of a fine building to beautSy the city
and enhance the value of surrounding
property? That plot Of ground is
worth $40, 900 a year ground rent. Low
taxes allow it to be held out of use
awaiting a higher offer. Is it any
wiser for a city of 1000, 900 Inhabitants
to allow itself to be held up by owners
of ground rents than for a city of l.
600, 900 inhabitants to be held up for
5000, 900 by a bridge company, as Brook
lyn is shown to be by the excellent
cartoon in this mornings World?
II. R. STARKwEATHER-
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
Brooklyn
Tax Them Though the Heavens Fall.


The following incident takes o.
course are merely incidentally is voucheo
for by one of the leading lawyers OF
this city:
Acertain well-known public citizen,
recently deceased, left a personal es-
tate of several thousand dollars in
trust for his son then at college.
One of the provisions of the will di-
r~cted that the proceeds derived from
the settlement of the estate should be
invested in a particular security.
A period of several months elapsed
before the trustee was able to pur-
chase any of the stock designated. In
the meantime the funds were deposited
in a well known trust company, and
were drawing two per cent. interest.
AS the estate had but recently passed
through the surrogate's court, the as
SCISSORS becamaaware of its existence
and, of COURSE assessed it. AS the
rate of taxation was 1.s5 per cent the
net income availble to pay for the
education of this only Sol was just Is
cents on one hupared dollars, and was
totally insufficient for Gne purpose,
Result, the Youth had to leave college
with his education 'uncomoleted.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
Fall Sowing of Glover Seed.


The intense drought has quite gen.
orally destroyed the spring seeding Of
grass and clover. Unless a "catch" of
grass is secured this season, the crop
rotation will be thrown out of joint,
the supply of hay and pasture next
year cut short, and soil fertility may
be lost through leaving the ground
bare.
The following suggestions are made
weather conditions a fall catch" OF
clover and grass nay be secured.
L. Burn the stubble to destroy all
rubbish that would interfere with the
perfect preparation Of the seed bed.
,. Harrow repeatedly. witifaalisk or
spading harrow, until the soil is thor
oughly loosened to the depth of two or
three inches.
3. Pulverize the soil very finely with
a fine tooth harrow.
4. AS oon as the soil becomes thor
oughly %moistened, SOW the clover seed,
harrow it in lightly, and heavily roll
the ground.
The timothy Or other grass seed may
he sown later, say about the usual
time of sowing wheat.
It the work is we'll done at the prop
er time, a catch will be reasonably
certain.
The urgent need of combating the
Hessian fly, and the value of the clover
crop as a soil remover and forage
plant, should induce the farmers to
act promptly and unitedly in their ef-
forts to repair the damage alreadysus-
tanned and prevent further loss.-Bul-
letin Indiana Exp. Station.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
The Life OF the Horse

The natural life Of a horse must de-
pend partly on it's breeding, but quite
as much on the kind of work it is set
to do. An animal never driven fast
and thus strained Oh injured by hard
roads will last to twenty-five years and
do good service. But if driven hard
on stone or asphalt road beds its feet
will give out and the animal will soo
become worthless. Eli Wakelee, of AM
sonia, Conn.,, has a team of horses thirty
four and thirty-fve years old which arc
yet In good condition and do good
work. He had their photograph taken
recently, and will hang it in his par.
lor. Mr.. Wakelee has worked this
team in double harness all the spring
and summer. blowing, dragging and
moving with them, and they are yet
in prime condition, sleek and glossy az
most horses hat are yet young. He
has worked them more than twenty
five years, and it is evident that the
team has neverteen misused. Amer
lean Cultivator.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
Keep Farm Records.

Every farmer is to a great extent a
manufacturer, and ought to keep a
record of his operations. This is the
key to success in any business. But
the soiltiller should attend to some
other matters in connection with his
accounts. A map of his farm, with
each Geld numbered, andits size. quail
ity Of soil, etc, specified, will be a
great aid in keeping track of the
years transactions. How many farm
ers have such a guide and convenience?
And how many kept such memoranda
the past year as will enable them
to tell the expense of each crop grown.
And how about the domestic animals?
If you keep cows what have they paid
You per head in the aggregate? And
what of sheep, swine, and even the
chickens? How much did each contrib
ute to your income, and which was the
most profitable?
Those who answer those peril
nent questions must be well advised in
regard to their financial position, and
need no admonition. but we fear many
are utterly unable to give any detailed
account Of their farming opera
tions, or whether the balance is
on the right or wrong side Of the
ledger. It is needless to say that such
management would wreck any CONNER
cial enterprise, and hence the frequent
complaint that farming doesn't pay"
Is not surprising. What we write Ii In.
sendea To b s~sggsIlYe sathss thsn
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

particular person is possessed Of per.
sonal property or not?"
by noting his business and whore
he is located"
81 don't understand you. Do You
NEAR that you assess a dry-goods nes'
chant (or %instance), more if his store
is on one street, than If on another?"
Yes"
''Supposing he has a store IN Grand
street, how much would you assess
him?'
according to the size of the store
we assess him a certain amount"
"Supposing his store is on Broad
way?"
If his store is the same size, we
should assess him a larger sun than
the Grand street merchant"
(''Ohl Wise ASSESSOR! 0seat is thy
prescieresl Profound is thy srisdom. y
I'm
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
Poultry on the Farmers Table.

There is not a great deal of differ
ence in the price of meats; and poul.
try, which is easily digested, ought to
be more on farmers tables than it is.
The staple meat product used on the
farm is pork. That is always hard to
digest, and if more of the vital energy
expended in digesting pork were used
in pushing farm work and planning
better methods, farming would pay
better than it does. The poultry yard
should not be regarded as only a
means to make more money. II 1t
makes farm life more attractive it will
be no less profitable than If it added
directly to the bank account. -Ameri.
can C~ultivator.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
HERE AND THERE.

Bad water Is responsible for more
disease and death among cattle, horses,
hogs and men than any other one cause.
The stagnant summer ponds are as full
of disease as a pesthouse. D
The nervous susceptibility Of a
GOV hss a telling influence, on her
milk; and 1t may be added that the
nervous susceptibility of the mixer
has a telling effect upon the cow.
The private dairyman who will
so arrange his dairy affairs as to have
his crop of butter come in when but
ter is scarce and dear, is the mi who
will find that dairying pays
Colts should have plenty of out
door exercise and room to run, kick up
their heels and play; plenty of green
grass, open air and sunshine. Boys
and girls should have the same God
given advantages, and thus may be
developed specimens fit for the shows.
The frog barometer. used in Ger.
many and Switzerland, lisa very simple
apparatus, consisting OF a jar OF wa
ter, a frog and a little wooden step.
ladder. If the frog comes out and sits
on the steps. rain is expected.
To take fertility from the soil by
means of crops without returning
something to it is not only robbing thu
soil, but future generations rs well.
Contrary to common opinion, there are
no lands that will not eventually sue
cumb to this sort of farming.
If all the birds in the country were
destroyed, it is said that the entire
crops would also be destroyed by in
sects as surely and swiftly as the crops
in the far west are devastated during q
locust plague.
"A game hen is the best mother;
they are perfect s%itters, and protect
their nests and chicks better than hens
of any other breed. A good game hen
will whip a cat or a rat, Or a hawk, or
a bad boy, and will fight anything that
threatens her brood. Consequently.
such hens seldom have bad luck rails
ing a family"
The English or house sparrow
raises three or four broods of young
between May and September. and THO
food Of the nestlings until they are old
enough to fly Is extensively insesta
After they leaYe tha nest they bseogas
ersassSreRA
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
KNOWLEDGE

Brings comfort and improvement and
tends to personal enjoyment when
rightly used. The many, who live bet
ter than others and enjoy life more, with
less expenditure, by more promptly
adapting the worlds best products to
the needs of physical being, will attest
the value to health of the pure liquid
laxative principles embraced in the
remedy, Syrup Of Figs.
Its excellence is due to its presenting
in the form most acceptable and pleas.
ant to the taste, the refreshing and truly
beneficial properties of a perfect lax
alive; efectually cleansing the system,
dispelling colds, headaches and fevers
and permanently curing constipation.
1t has given satisfaction to millions and
met with the approval of the medical
profession, because it acts on the Kid
neys, Liver and Bowels without weak
ening them and it is perfectly free from
every Objectionable substance.
Syrup of Figs is for sale by all drug
gists in SOC and 81 bottles, but it is man
ufactured by the California Fig Syrup
Co. only, whose name is printed on every
package, also the name, Syrup of Figs,
and being we'll informed, you will not
accept any substitute if offered.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
Sailing Stock.

We s rock salt in large humps for
the horses. Each horse has q lump be-
fore it all the time, to lick from as he
may want it. We salt our cows in the
barn at milking time, once u day.
That is, a little salt. say a heaping
teaspoonful, is put before every COW
each morning to eat if she wants 1t. It
is put right on the cement feeding
floor. A little salt daily aids diges-
ton in the cow or horse and waters
the milk in a legitimate way. Salt
ing freely once a week is not the
best wayJany more than it would be
for us to eat all our salt for the week
every Sunday morning. In fact, / be-
lieve that salt thus fed Is often an in
jury, as well as an advantage. Stock
need salt as we'll as food, but it should
be given them in a proper way. Fed
in the stabla, as we do, each horse and
cow had its avn, and cannot be robbed
by some bosfI to the injury of BOTH
I. b. Terry,Nn Practical Farmer.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
TAX REFORM STUDIES
EDITED BY BOLTON HALL.
An Open Field.

II any one has an impression that
communications to these "Studies'
will not be published unless they echo
the editors ideas he is mistaken.
Articles on any aspect of taxation
Will always be welcome, if they are
decent, well written, within reason
aole limits and to the point, except
that we do not discuss the tariff.
Land owners especially should be
interested, as the principal benefit of
any Improvement or social advance
goes to them in the increase of value
given to land. Address this office, or
10 Lock street, Buffalo, N. Y.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
How Personal Properly Is Assessed.

E
The following interesting story
showing the method adopted in assess.
ing personal property in this city
should make instructive reading for
those of our rural friends who are CON
stantly demanding more stringent
laws for the taxation Of this form OF
property.
The assessment levied against the
personal property Of a client being ex.
c-essive, the late David Dudley Field
was retained to c n . reduction. In
cross-examining the assessor in whose
district the clients business = locat-
ed, the following colloqny took place:
aWhere do you get the names OF
those whom you assess for personal
property
from the City Directory
nHon do yon determine whsthss I
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
An Object Lesson.

The southeast corner of Wall street
and Broadway is probably the most
valuable spot in the United States. Il
is also one of the smallest building
lots ID this city. having a frontage on
Wall street of only 80 feet 10 inches,
and on Broadway of 80 feet 10 inches,
or i, 1873 square feet.
The present owners price is $500, ooa
This is about s1.4so a square foot, OF
Sl7, coo, 900 an acre.
AS the building is worthless, the
value is purely q land value.
How many acres Of farm land mot
including Improvements thereoa9
wouM si77,soa 600 p~ssrchAssa
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
An Expert Opinion.

Thomas g. Shearman is known a.
a bold man., and it certainly required
all his courage to write Natural Tax.
alton" Nearly every professor of Do.
litical economy. nearly every great
! writer of economies, has asserted time
and again that there car be no science
OF taxation and mo natural laws OF
taxation Mr.. Shearman says that
there can be, and many Of those who
read his book will believe that he has
shown that there not only can be but
that there is q science Of taxation with
natural laws of taxation. The book is
one of the clearest, brightest. clever.
est that has been written on this sub.
ieet. e. P. Putnam's Sons.)-N. Y.
World.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19
Skinny Sufferers Saved.

Tobacco users as a rule are away below
normal weight because tobacco destroys
digestion and causes nerve irritation that
saps brain power and vitality. You can get
a quick, guaranteed relief by the use of No
To-Bac, and then if you don't like your free
dom and improved physical condition you
can learn the use of tobacco over again, just
like the first time. No-To- BAG sold under
guarantee to cure by Druggists everywhere.
Book free. AID. Sterling Remedy Co., New
York City or Chicago.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

''Do you think the senator had any presi-
Dental aspirations!" "Certainly not; he's
ready to state his views on every public
question. '-Detroit News.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

NELL1E-"Look at those pretty cows!"
Maudie-"They are not COWS; they are
calves" Nellie-'But what is the differ
ence!" Maudie-"IVhy cows give milk, and
calves give jelly"
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

"JoNEs seemed to be awfully mad when /
overlook him this morning. whats the
matter, l wonder1" why, you see, l had
the faster horse."-Chicago Tribune.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

SHE-"It can never be. AL l can promise
you is a mere acquaintanceship." He
eThen accept my offer Of marriage: 1t VIII
enough. "-Indianapolis Journal.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

admonitory. Keep an accurate a.
count of your doings, and you will not
only be wiser, but ere long, richer in
consequence. In fact, resolve that
you will know how you stand at the
close of another Year.-Southern Farm.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

A True FRIEND.-Miss Withers-"What
would you do if | should refuse you?' He
I'D see if | couldn't find some other fellow
vino would be willing to marry you."-Life.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

ALrHot'3 III she had q gift, as people said,
A generous gift of song from Nature free,
Her dear papa with rage fell nearly dead
AT finding each short lesson cost a V.
Pittsburgh DiSpatch.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

SOME grief shows much of love; but much
OF grief shows still some want Of wit
Slahesneare.
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

HE-"Why do you refuse me when ] say
/ can't live without you2" She-"You
have aroused my Curiosity ."-Detroit Trib-
une. &
The Opelousas courier., 1895-10-19

SPAcE-ssWhat became of THAT story you
were working on-the one that you said
would be immortalz' Weekwage-''The
editor killed t.n-lndianapolis Journal.