davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
HUMOROUS.

-Mother-"Why do you stay at home
all the timer" Have you no friends to
visit? Laura-"Yes, one, but 1 can
not endure her."-Fliegende Blaetter.
-Johnny-'Mamma, my toes are not
as hard as leather, are tbey?" Mamma
NO, Johnny" Johnny Then,
mamma, how do they wear themselves
through my shoes?"
-Lady-"Are you sure this tea is
genuine? 1t has a very peculiar SMELL"
Dealer-"Very possibly; gunpowder, no
doubt; they're having war in China
just now."-Dorfbarbier.
Gross Flattery.-"Whenever l see
you l am always reminded of an emf.
nent scientist" Really, Herr Pro-
fessor; and pray, what scientist might
that be?" Observation-Disclosures Blat-
ter.
-Smithers-"Brown, you are a we'll
read man, what do you think is the
greatest thing about this world?"
Brown We'll, to be accurate,
Smithers. 1 think it's the circumfer-
ence."-Adams Freeman.
-Flipjack-''I met Lottie.on the ave-
nue. this morning, and as she recognized
me her countenance fell" Peawick-
"Why so?" F1ipjack-"Because the
pavement vas slippery. The rest of
her fell o. ."-Harlem Life.
His fredericksburg Clerk
"Do you like to stand in front of the
store and see the crowds go by?" Old
Merchant-'No, but like to stand in
the back of the store and see the crowds
come buy."-Buffalo Commercial.
Lady (widow)-"Do you know that
my daughter has set her eyes upon you,
Herr Miller?r Gent (iattered)-''Has
she. really?" Lady-"Certainly; only
to-day she was saying: That's the sort
of gentleman 1 should like for my
papa.'"-Tagliche Rundschau.
-Reprehensible Extravagance.-Clerk
(who has had sickness in the family, to
his employer)-'I would respectfully
ask you for an advance. Yesterday
had to pay my doctors bill, amounting
t o one hundred and thirty marks
Principal-"Ah! my dear fellow, the
old story. I'm afraid-living vastly be-
yond your means!'-Mons. Calpe.
Little Cadby (no one knows how he
managed to get into the club to Old
and Popular MEMBER say, old chap.
l want you to put your name down
for a friend of mine who's up for cleo
ton" Old Member-'What's he done?''
Little Cadby-'Well-he once saved
my life" Old MEMBER shouldn't
tell anybody, if 1 were you!"-Pall Mall
Budget
1t was customary, when Queen Anne
was dressing. for prayers to De read in
the anterooIn. and once her majesty
gave orders for the door to be shut
while she changed her things, where.
upon the chaplain stopped. The queen
Immediately sent to ask why ne did not
proceed. to which he replied that he
would not whistle the Word Of God
through the keyhola."
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23

Washington was his apotheosis- One
of his male ancestors had married a
Washington and he gloried in the con-
nection. 1t was largely through his in
fluence that the celebration of the hero's
natal day was determined upon, and it
was upon his advice that young Marion
was chosen orator.
The colonel's creed was simple. He
accepted the orthodox faith, worshiped
the memory of his dead wife, adored
his only child, and held that the word
of a gentleman could not be broken.
He abhorred deceit and never forgave
it in anybody. Somewhat old-fash-
toned, he believed in dueling, and
maintained strenuously that the law
was made only for the weak. He had
no patience with those who appealed
to the arbitrament of the courts. Still
he was 4 most gentle, quiet man who
never disputed, declined to take any
active part in politics, and entertained
with an easy grace that is the charm
of true Virginia hospita ity.
1t was the evening of the day before
the 22d of February and the colonel
drove home from Woodvillc in excellent
spirits. Every arrangement had been
thoroughly completed and the weather
promised to be suspicious on the NOR
row. Before he entered the house old
Mizraim encountered him.
Deed, marser, it do seem .aick cherry
ting tote far fer us De ice'ouse er
plum full er game n fish n Piney's
frowin' herself away CD de cookin'
an hit looks somefin' laicll de good oil
times afo' de wah, marser."
This intelligence added to the good
humor of the all-hospitable master of
the house, whose handsome face was
covered over with a smile as he en-
tered the great hall of the noble
old colonial mano that his great
grandfather had built. He was sur
prised that Grace did not greet him ac-
cording to her custom, for he was sure
she must have heard his voice. Search
ing anXiously about he found her in a
corner bathed in tears and sobting as
though her heart would break.
why, pet, what in the world is the
matter?!"
Without uttering a word she placed
in his hands "a Richmond paper and
pointed to a brief paragraph. His eyes
opened wide in establishment as he
read:
Cards are out for the wedding of
Howell Marion, Esq, the brilliant
young lawyer, and Miss Hattie, daugh-
ter of John w. Powell, the well-known
capitalist of the city"
The father was silent for scme mo-
ments as he stood over his idol, whose
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
washlngron's Personal Appearance.

His portraits do justice to the unani-
nous verdict of all who saw him as to
his imposing appearance. When pre-
pared for burial he measured just six
feet, but in full vigor he was three inches
taller. La Fayette declared his hands
were the largest he vel saw on a man.
He was of a fair and somewhat horid
complexion and weighed about two
hundred and twenty pounds. He moved
and rode with commanding dignity.
Every aspect of external view pro-
claimed Washington a born leader of
men, and his contemporaries are often
found relating the awe-inspiring effects
his behavior and bearing produced on
those with whom he came into contact
N. Y. Ledger.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23

hair he stroled gently. Finally he
asked, in unsteady tones:
Did you care for him 90 much,
PETE"
80 father, cried the girl, passionate
ly, as she threw her arms upward and
clasped them about his neck.
WAS tberc-did he ask you to be his
wife?"
1t was some time before the agita-
ton of the girl permitted her to speak.
Then she told him, as 4 weary child
making conplaint.:o its mother, that
while no formal betrothal had taken
place she had every assurance of mis-
love and, indeed, it was his expressed
purpose TO ask her hand in marriage
during the coming visit. She could not
understand his perfidy; she must not,
she could not doubt, yet there were
the words in cold. cruel type.
HE is an u~nmitigated sconndrel,
and you must forget him, my child"
Then he sought to soothe her by
comforting words, but, alas! there is
no balm for a heart thus wounded.
Mans perfidy is more cruel than the
knife of the assassin or the poison of
the asp.
After a long time he persuaded her
to go to her room and seek sleep: but.
as for him. he walked his apartment
all night. His face grew very stern in
this long vigil and there was infinite
ena in it as he came out to his
breakfast. Grace had sent word that
she was unable to leave her room, but
she insisted that he take part in the
days celebration. Learning from his
daughters maid that her mistress was
in no alarming condition, the colonel
left the house in search of Mizraim.
There will be no company here to-
day and you may tell Piney hat she
need not go to your young mistress for
any orders"
Look or yere, marser," began Miz-
rain. with the easy freedom of a life
long favorite, "dar's de-"
"Shut up, sir. Do as / bid you," and
the colonel turned sharply away upon
his.heel.
well, 1 clar' to neutrality-suspicious., /
know'd marser wuz ergittin' oil, but I
nebber fought he were gwine crazy.
Dat de fus' time in his life he was i'm
percent to OF Miz, n dat a sho' sign he
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23

The amazed colonel saw his lovely
daughter embodied in the embrace of
the man he had been so near to killing,
and then, turning to the judge, cried
il dismay:
II have indeed been mad. ! should
have known that no Marion could do a
dishono-able thing
Colonel" said Marion, approaching
with the happy girl at his side. Grace
and desire your consent to our mar
rage. That newspaper paragraph was
an infamous"
Gentlemen have no need to make
explanations one to another. my dear
Marion. You may have Grace, and
may God bless the union. Excuse me
for a moment" he cried, as though
suddenly reminded of an important
duty. Then he fastened in the direc-
ticn of Mizraim, who was leading away
the horses.
"Mizraim, 1 have changed my mind.
Tell Piney to cook such a dinner as she
never"
Look er yere, marser, wuz yer 'spos-
in 1 minded waiter you done said dis
mornin'? Disser's Ginrul Washin'ton's
bufday, so l jis' done tell Piney muffin,
'ceptin' dat eff she didn' git er meal
better n her nanny eber done cook
I'd gin her 4 good lammin'. Git up dar,
yer lazy critters"
WILLIAM RossEE CoBBE.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23

crowd, that respectfully divided at his
approach.
With bowed head he was slowly max
ing his way towards the Woodville
tavern, when a bright, CHEEKY voice
said:
"Why, colonel, I've looked for you
everywhere. Where is Miss Gracc?'
You infamous scoundrel! \ friend
of mine will see you without delay"
cried the old man, passionately.
What a be the matter? Are you
ill?"
Away, sir, or there will be murder.
Do you hear? l would take no mean
advantage"
The young mar regarded the re-
treating form OF the old soldier with
grave concern, when a voice at his side
said:
'Marser Howl, oil marser lose his
haid; he's gettin' OF. You jis' see Miss
Oracle" and Mizraim fastened after
the colonel.
Three hours later, and it was neal
the setting of the sun, Col. Temple and
his most intimate friend, Judge Lotion,
rode slowly up the broad lane that led
to the Temple mansion. They were
conversing earnestly as they dis
mounted.
~ insist, judge, that you follow him
to Richmond and demand satisfaction.
l cannot understand how he could have
disappeared so quickly"
Mizraim, after his master fell into
the company of the judge, had fastened
home and now stood by the side of the
colonel, who suddenly started forward,
as he cried:
There is the villain" and, carried
away with infinite passion. hastily
drew a revolver, leveling it at Marion,
who was advancing and scarcely ten
PAGES distant. The excited la did
not perceive that his daughter was
fast approaching from the house.
Papa" she cried in glad accents,
not observing his tragic movement.
The eyes of Marion had been Fixed
upon the girl too, and he had seen
nothing. Mizraim, who had not lost
a gesture of his master, rushed forward
and wrested the weapon from the old
mans grasp, ~concealing it about bis
own person and then quickly returned
to the horses
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
ROSE WHIST PARTY.
4 Novel and Pretty Idea for q Pleasant
Social Evening.

1 Novel and Pretty idea for a Pleasant
Social Evening.
Any novel idea which will help to
entertain a number of guests is always
a welcome suggestion and one very
pretty form of entertainment is a rose
whist party.
To begin with, the invitations are
sent out on pale pink paper, and an
nounce that rose whist is to be the or
der of the evening. The game played
is that familiar one of progressive
whist, with the exception hat each
player keeps account for herself Of all
the red cards which are taken, and
nothing else is counted. When the
time Is up the fortunate player who
holds the most red cards takes the first
prize, while the one who has the least
gets the booty"
pertaining to the rose. Numerous ar
ticles can be thought of, such as rose
bowls, rose candlesticks, rose sachets,
bottles of rose perfume, bonbonnieres
with candied rose leaves, etc. Upon
each table are placed four full-grown
La France or Mermet roses, with long
stems and green leaves, as well as a
dainty dish filled with pink and white
bonbons. Each player also has a tally
lard of pink paper and a pink pencil
attached for keeping the score
The ices served are pink and white,
and the supper table should be grace
fully draped with pink ribbons, with
rose petals strewn about on the cover.
In fact. roses in pr~ofusion should be
everywhere and the lights should be
softly shaded in pink.
This can be made a very pretty form
of amusement, and ones own ingenuity
could suggest many more features to
make it a great success. 1t would be
an added attraction if the hostess were
dressed in a rose pink GOWN. Y.
g.,
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
The First Tribute In Verse.

Oddly enough, the first poem evel
written in honor of Gen. Washington
comes from the pen of a woman Of
negro birth. In the Pennsylvania Mag
azine for April, 177G, these verses are
printed, and they are signed "Phillis
Wheatley, the African poetess, Provi-
dence, October &c, 1775:"
Celestial choir! enthron'd in realms Of light.
ColumbiIs scenes Of glorious tolls I'll write.
While freedoms cause her anxious breass
alarms,
She flashes dreadful in refulgent arms:
See mother earth her offSpring'S fate bemoan
And nations gaze at scenes before unknown
Fam'd for thy valcr, for thy virtues more,
Hear every tongue thy guardian aid implore.
Proceed. great chief. with virtue on thy side.
Thy ev'ry action let the goddess guide.
A crown, q mansion, and 4 throne that shine,
With gold unfading, Washington. be thine!
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.


MIR. Frank Stouch, of Reading, Pa.
although in his s7th year. still teaches
dancing, and is said to be as active as
a vigorous man of So During hislong
career as a dancing master he has had
$4,000 pupils.
A king who objects to music is
King George of Greece, whose pet
aversion is the national hymn of the
country over which he reigns. No
matter where the unfortunate man
goes, either at home or abroad, he is
compelled to listen to the strains of this
melody, which is invariably struck up
i'm his honor.
The eminent French author, NJ.
Anatole Leroy Beaulieu. once made a
remark which may be instructive 1t
this time. The character" he said,
lis what changes the least in a race
Among the French of the Third repub-
lie, n can yet find characteristic
traces of the Gauls of the time of We
ceirgetorix."
Mime. Casimir-Perier, wife of the
now ex-president of the French re-
public, has organized a crusade against
the use of birds and wings for decora-
tive purposes, and a movement thus au-
thorized is likely to be attended with
success. If Paris gives the word, of
course, England and America will
abandon this barbarous custom; other
wise these countries may find a plague
descending upon them rivaling those
of Europe.
Susan B. Anthony is cheerful. She
says: while it is true that women
have only secured full suffrage in two
states, they have secured partial or
local suffrage in more than ten thou
sand communities. The only differ
ence that remains. the last surviving
relic of the age when woman was chat
tel property and was the savage slave
of a still more savage lord, remains to
be wiped away. When this is done,
for the first time in the world we will
have perfect liberty and perfect equal
ity."
Does literature pay? According to
the late Mr.. John Arlington Symonds,
there's no worse profession. Speaking
of his book on the Renaissance in
Italy" he says: when l have brought
out these two (the LAST volumes, 1
shall have had in all 81, 100 for this
long bit of work. Allowing for periods
in which ! was unfit to work-perhaps
in which l sought a change of work.
find that 1 have spent eleven years up
on this task, and pretty hard years of
daily labor. The education which en-
abled mt to attempt it was a very cost
ly one, and the abilities which quail
fed me for it, though not f~irst-rate,
were at least unusual in their combina-
tion of many-sided intelligence with
acquired knowledge and literary style.
I have, then, been paid at the rate of
s10O per annum; but l must deduct at
least ESQ per annum from my gains for
books and travel, quite indispensable
to the production. Shis, 1 reckon, is
really far below the just allowance.
Say, then, 1 have received ESQ a year
during the eleven best years of my life
for the execution of a laborious work,
which implied an expensive education
and unusual cast Of intellect. The pay
is about equal to the wages of a third
class merchants clerk or a second-class
butler, the latter being also found in
food and lodging"
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
Away on.

A Boston lecturer recently told the
Pine Tree State club an amusing incl
dent in connection with 1.-The Aroos-
took war;" when Webster was secre-
tary of state. Two Maine country
men," said the lecturer, 'were discuss
ing one of Webster's papers in regard
to the controversy, when one of them
asked what Webster meant by the
three words: Sine qua non. The
other replied that he wasn't quite sure,
but thought they were islands in Pas
samaquoddy bay"
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
Could Trip the Light Fantastic.

Although Gen. Washington was a
military commander and a leader of
successful armies, he was also a flower
of chivalry n times of peace, and at
his own inauguration ball he is de-
scribed as dancing two cotillons and a
minuet. Historians also speak of q
visit he made to Annapolis, where hs
opened a ball given by the citizens in
his honor, with Mrs. James Macubbin.
one of the most beautiful woman Of
that age Detroit Free Press
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
Getting Even with a JanItor.

The j%anitor of one of Somerville's
apartment houses was married recent
ly, and the tenants all dubbed to-
gether and bought him two round-trip
tickets to San Francisco, SO that when
he went on his wedding tri? he might
stay away IS long as possible They
all say that it seems as if they have
been living while he has been gone
Someryille Journal.
The Cape Girardeau Democrat. (Cape Girardeau, Mo.) 1876-1909, 1895-02-23
II They Live.

Mr.. Cawker (quoting)-Boys will Be
boys.
Mrs. Cawker (correcting(-No boyi
will be men.-JudRe.
The herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1893-1900, 1895-11-17
Money, Stock, Bond and Produce
Quotations
WALL STREET SPECULATION
Trading Siagnant and the Movement Of
Prices Narrow
Imports Show q Heavy Increase While Ex-
ports Remain Almost Stationary-Bond
Harket Dull and Lower

NEW YORK, Nov. 16.-Today's stock
speculation was not especially interest
ing. The movement of prices was narrow
as a rule and trading was at times stag
nant. The market opvned dull, with
changes in a lower direction. A firm
tone soon developed in some of the lead
ing shares. The closing was dull and as
result Of tho days business light
fractional gains appear in a number OF in
stan Ces.
During the week Pacific Mail has been
favorably influenced by the reported re-
consideration by that company of the
terms offered by the Panama railroad in
terests for an alliance. Bearing on the
general financial outlook are the I'M
changed trade conditions which have
com Ielled this weeks gold exports and
tho attitude OF foreign investors and
spectators toward our securities.
Briefly. tho cause of the exports of gold
at the present time is that our exports of
merchandise have remained almost sta
tionary, while our imports show heavy
increase.
The speculation in bonds today was
dull ana without feature. The transac.
lions footed up 1854. 900 and we're made at
slight concessions on the prices. There
was a moderate increase in the volume
of buisness for the week and strong
tone characterized the market. The net
results are in most cases substantial
gains. Of these the principal we're in
81 per cent. Governments were we'll held
throughout on purchases. aggregatlng
$66, 900. In state issues there was no
change OF consequence.
The herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1893-1900, 1895-11-17
An Exchange Letter


The Southern California Fruit exchange
has issued the following circular to the
producers of citrus fruit:
To the Fruit Trade I'VE are gratified to
know that wherever the plan Of the ex-
change system Tor the com ing season has
been presented to the trade it has met
with favor. ana this office is in daily re-
ceipt Of hearty exressions of endorse
ment.
We also have information to the effect
that IN other quarters certain unscrupu-
lous' packers and shippers Of California
oranges are endeavoring to prejudice the
trade against the management of the
Southern California Fruit exchange by
representing that We propose TO ignore
the established channels of business and
deal only with the retail trade. Under
any conditions this would be absurd on
its face, but especially SO In view of the
pleasant relations maintained for the
past two seasons between this organiza.
tion and the general fruit trade.
In reply to this and other like N isrep-
lamentations brought to our notice, we
desire simply to call attention to the en-
closed plan of the exchanges for the com.
ing season, feeling assured it will Iom
mead itself to the judgment of all VINO
will take the pains to acquaint thenA-
that SO far from antagohizing, we pro-
pos, if possi BILE, to establish still closer
relations with the Wholesale trade.
The only departure from the sale OF
fruit in car lots will he under the ex-
oeptiuns named in paragraph 10 of the
plan. If new frontier markets can be
opened up in this way, without interior
ing with trade already established, we
reserve the privilege of doing otherwise.
We fully realize that the interests of the
legitimate fruit trade and this Orsaniza.
tlon are identical, and we therefore pro-
poss "to do otherwise" when the inter.
ests OF our trade demand protection. We
believe it to be possible to Grad cate
many of the evils that tend tu degrade
the business at one end Of the line and
i'm poverish the grower at the other. To
this end we in vite, and are led to be-
lieve We will have, the cooperation and
patronage OF all we'll disposed dealers.
Pl ase give the enclosed plan careful
perusal, and remember that reliable IN
formation concerning the methods and
operations of the exchange system can De
had only through our auth orized repre-
sent atives or At this OSsce.
The ing cropsis IN fine condition
at this writing and promises the usual
standard Of excellence.
We solicit correspondence with q view
to future business
The herald. [microfilm reel] (Los Angeles [Calif.]) 1893-1900, 1895-11-17

Provisions- Hams, Rex per ID, iiNc;
picnic, 6Xo; homeless, Sc:
:. Bacon-Psr To-, Rex breakfast, 10Nc;
light meaium. sXc; medium, TIC.
Dried beef--Per lb., sets, 10c; insides,
1lhc.
SIC; short clear, eNc; GEAR backs. sac.
Picked pork-Per nalf bbI.. so lbs, IS.
Lard-Per h., ivory compound, tierces,
SIC; rexoline. 6Xc; .pure leaf, 81.
Cottolene-Sc.
Grain and hay-Barley. per Genital, feed,
Coo; seed, 60c. Corn-Per GENITAL, 95c.
Wheat--Per GENITAL. $l.O5. Hay-Per ton.
Alfalfa, So. 00@SlO. go; barley, $7.UO@$9. 90;
wheat, $9.U0@$l0.O0; tame oats, $4,000
$40 90.
Cirrus Fruits -Lemons-Uncured, $1.40
0$l.60 cured. $2.500$3,00. Oranges-Per
box, fancy seedlings, $l.0O; choice, SOC;
standard, 65c.
Dried Frnits-Applss-sun dried. sacks,
per To-, 4@5c; boxes. 6N7c;. evaporated
ianoy 1910; Apricots-Fancy,, SIC;
cnoice Sc. Peaches Fancy unpeeled 80;
bleached, 40. Nectarines-Fancy, S@9c;
choice, 6D7c. Pears-Fancy svaporated,
70Yc. Plums-Pitted choice, 7@9c.
Prunes-Choi,e boxed ,4@5c; sacks, 2@3c:
Live stock Hogs-Per cwt. SO. Beef
cattle, 5@6c. Mutton, 4Ac per 10. Veal,
H@7c per ID.
8 Observation-Disclosures Angeles, To-; me.
dunn soft, 100; soft she'll Los Nietos
fancy, 1870. Almonds--Soft shell, 11@
12c; paper shell. 13c; hard shell. &c. Pc
cans-13@l5cX; iilberts, 10@l2Xc.
Honey and Beeswax-Houey-Co
10N@l1c per Id; strained, 3H@4c. Bees
wax. 20@22o per ID.
Hides and Wool-Hides as they run
Dry, llXc; kips, &c; dry calf, l4c; bulls
and stays, 61&c. Sheep pelts-Wssk. Wool,
Normally, 2X@5c.
nXc; young America l2Tc; hand, 1870;
half cream flats.7o; young America, 7i5c;
hand. SIC. Eastern-Chedders and twins,
13@l4o. I'm ported-Swiss. Csc: lin bur-
ger, 14@15c; bo.k, l5@l6c; Westphalia,
Zoe; Roquefort. 42Xc.
Fresh Meats--Butchers' prices for
whole carcasses: Beef-5M7c per Id. Veal
--4@5c. Mutton. AZ @5iac. Pork--5T
(01c,