davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
HUMoR OF RECENT DATE.

"Mary," said the sick man to his wife, when
the doctor pronounced it case of smallpox,
''if any of my creditors call, tell them that am
at last in condition to give them something"
London Tit-Bits.
May-I am going to marry Mr. Quickblood.
Old Bachelor Cousin-Good heavensl
May-Why do you say that? He's well off.
Old Bachelor Cousin-Yes, he's we'll off as he
is; but he doesn't know it.-Philadelphia
Record.
Fashionable Doctor-My dear young lady,
you are drinking unfltered water, which
swarms with animal organisms. You should
have it boiled-that will kill them.
His Patient-Well, doctor. / think I'd sooner
be an aquarium than cemetery.-Household
Words.
The telegraph editor OF the Globe is so used
to writing kilograms that end up with Trouble
is expected" that he recently made this addi-
ton to marriage notice which passed through
his hands. and the mistake wasn't notice until
the form was locked up.-Atchison Globe.
"Ha, hal ha, hap laughed the great detec-
tive, 81 have them now"
For five days he had been on the trail and
had neither eaten nor slept.
He had done nothing but drink.
Under the circumstances his joyous assertion
that he had 'em bore the similitude of verify
Detroit Tribune.
"You seem excited, dear. What has hap
pened?"
'Poor Jack Murray I have just rejected
him."
"Oh, don't mind little thing like that.
Why, reject him every six months.-Louis-
vile Courier-Journal.
"Tommie, your spelling is very bad" said
Mr.. Hicks to his boy.
That's all right, papa" said Tommie.
"When grow up Pm going to dictate all my
letters, like you do. It's the typewriter thatll
have to know spelling, not me. "-Harper's
Round Table.
Bobbie Tin a sober mood)-Oh, mamma,
wish only had all the money I've spent for
sweets.
Mamma (proudly)-My boy would put it in
his savings bank, wouldn't he?
Robbie (deliberately)-No, mamma; I'd buy
more sweeses-Boston Home Journal.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
Alien Labor,

The imported diamond-cutters who were
brought over to this country some time ago,
and who were subsequently deported under the
provisions of the alien contract labor law,
have turned up on this side of the water again
and they are found to have obtained employ
ment here at their trade. How they managed
to get in after having once been shut out the
explain, but it is not difficult to guess the
methods they employed to escape detection.
The alien contract labor law, as it now stands
surd features, and those which are defensible
appear to be practically impossible of enforce
ment.-Boston Herald,
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
Prohibition in Des Moines.

The Register spent many years in trying to
enforce the prohibitory law. 1t even went so
far as to uphold the most uncomfortable
scoundrels who ever searched homes or plum
dered treasures, because it hoped that some
how good might come from the evils inflicted,
but IL was all in vain. Carloads of liquors were
hauled into Des Moines every day and the
county grew poorer every day. We can close
the drugstore saloons now because there is a
legal channel for the stuff. Trying to shut off
the whole traffic is like trying to stop Niagara
with dam. The water must flow some.
where.-Iowa State Register.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
CALIFoRNIANs IN NEW YORK.

NEW YORK, n. Y, August 12.-Among the
arrivals to-day were: San Francisco-A. B.
Bowers, Murray Hill; C. S. Bradley and F. G.
Lewis, ST. Cloud; Miss J. Lucille, Bartholdi;
Mrs. Noble, Belvedere; F. J. Rogan, Grand
Union; G. Gumpertz, Hoffman; Mrs. C. A. Kee-
sing, Imperial; J. C. Stubs, Miss NJ. S. Stubs,
Mr.. and Mrs. J. <. Wilson and the Misses Will
son, Windsor. Los Ange1es-T. NJ. Coulter,
Westminster; II. Graham, Grand Union.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
Come on, Mr.. Morrison.

The Inquirer has seen no signs starting from
the sky which pointed toward the author OF
the horizontal tariff bill, but it believes that il
voices the conviction of majority of Republi-
cans when it says that it would just as soon
nave morrison as any other candidate. He
would typify in his person the very issue upon
which the voters want to express their opin.
Ion, and the way they would go for him would
make the 80 dog-days very pleasant
Quirer,
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
FRAIIyGBR'S
C|oakS:,
Suits,
FurS.

The elegant stock of the late
Mr.. A. M. Fratinger, 1O5 Kearny
street, will be closed out, regard
less of cost, CONNER n g
Wednesday, August 18th, at 8
A. NJ, and continuing daily
until disposed of.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
Stanford Unfversitv.

The straits to which Stanford University is
reduced by the suit of the United States Gov
eminent for funds to pay its running expen SEES
Mss brought out the resolute character of Mrs.
etaaford In q strong light. She has no sooner
met difficulty than her spirit has risen to the
emergency.-Boston Herald.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
Statues in Large Parks.

1t is not easy, says Mr.. Olmsted, to make peo-
pie understand why statues and other works of
art should not be set up in our great parks
And yet it ought not to be difficult. Surely it
should be self-evident to all men and women
of taste that great park, like Central or Pros
pect, should be essentially rural; that statues
sentially formal and artificial; and that to mix
the two is homogeneous. Every one would rec
ognize the absurdity of hanging oil paintings
upon the trunks of trees. Why is it any better
to set up statues among them?-New York Tri-
buQe
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
THE WIELAND LITIGATION.
A Suit in Relation to the Accounts Be-
tween Two Estates.

suit IN Relation TO Clio <ASOouoS
tween Two Estates.
The suit of Anna NJ. Zeltner, as executor
of John H Wielands will. against Charles
S. Wieland, executor of the Sophie We
land will, was taken up in Judge Hunts
court yesterday morning. 1t is suit to
recover 3d. 47 AZ, claimed to be due under
settlement of the brewery sale to syn
dictate.
jury was impaneled, and then by
agreement of the counsel the suit was dis
missed to give the plaintiff an opportunity
to file an amended complaint. The plain
tiff pays all the costs of the suit. Hunt q
Lezynsky represented the plaintiff and
Samuel NJ. Shortridge was counsel for the
defense.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
REPORTING THE DURRANT CASE

The Durrant case is now before the public in
all its horrible details. THE CALL in this City
shows wisdom in its decision to eliminate all
Objectionable features from its report of the
trial.-Pacitic Coast Endeayorer.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

California will miss Frank N. Pixley,
and it will be long before we see another
like him.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Art and commerce, it seems, do not mix
well, even in Bohemia.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

E. MARTIN q Co., the liquor merchants, are
at All Market street The fact that their re-
moyal has not resulted in the loss of any Of
their old patrons is the best evidence OF lair and
honest dealing. The high standard OF their
wines and liquors has long been known.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

The vacancy on the Supreme bench is to
many people the biggest thing in the
United States.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

When you see the exhibits OF home prod
ucts at the Mechanics Fair make up your
mind to patronize them.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Let US hope that no ford writer will call
the Mechanics Fair a carnival of industry.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
PEOPLE TALKED ABOUT.
Bismarck is getting better. His doctor ha
sent him another cask of beer,

Bismarck is getting better. His doctor has
sent him another cask of beer,
In the opinion of Andrew Lang, Horace
Howard Furness of Philadelphia, the Shakes
perian scholar, is the greatest American.
During the thirty years Ainsworth r. Spot
ford has been Librarian of Congress the num-
Der of books in his charge has increased from
10000 to 100000.
Mrs Wentworth, Philadelphia widow, sur
prised her friends by decorating her bicycle
with crepe when she went cycling a few days
after the death of her husband.
Speaker Crisp's father and mother were
actors and his older brothers as well. One of
the Speakers earliest recollections is seeing his
father play Armand Duval to his mothers
Camille
D. w. Stevens, the American Secretary of the
Japanese Legation at Washington, is base
ball crank, and has persuaded the Japanese
Minister to accompany him to several ball
games.
Gilbert Parker recently encountered Cana
dian Bishop whom he had known in his boy
hood. The Bishop pompously inquired: "Ah,
Gilbert. And are you still writing your-ah-
little books?" Mr.. Parker answered promptly
ayes, Bishop. And are you still preaching
your-ah-little sermons?'
A well-known wit used to say that every girl
should be given five or six names from which
her future husband could make his choice.
Perhaps that principle prevailed at the chris
tening of an Englishwoman whose will has just
been admitted to probate. Her name was Edna
Muriel Ethel Gladys Caroline Maud Beatrice
Iaura Tetheriupton MerkS
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

1t has now been suggested that William
E. Russell of Massachusetts might be a
good enough Western man if he would
accept the Democratic nomination.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

In going to Japan for pleasure and rest
it is to be hoped that Irving M. Scott will
find some contracts there for profit and
work when he comes home.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

When it loses its power over publ
opinion the monopoly will soon lose it
grip on the public purse.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Local Democracy is getting into shape
for the coming split-up in the National
party, and every faction in the Nation win
have its champions here.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Democracy has good many more
corpses than leaders in the field.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

The Changers School OF Instruction died
at Camp Roache only to be born again at
San Jose with more oratory and bigger au-
diences.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

If the churches of San Francisco make
an earnest and united effort the Christian
Association will soon be out of debt.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Mr.. Corbett continues to represent Cali.
fornia muscle, but his recent manners
have evidently been acquired in the East.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

It is good thing to have reduced the
lottery swindles in this City by so per cent,
but in the fight against monopoly we must
clean up the whole hog.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

a Railroad Commissioner who says "the
idea of the public is to cinch the railroads
is little bit too preiudiced to make good
juryman in the case.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

TIRED women should stop and consider the dan
gers which threaten them because OF their weak.
nesses and lack of ambition. Hoods Sarsaparilla
will purify the blood and give strength.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Our contemporaries who are denouncing
Jerome's ideas OF Democracy have proba-
bly, forgotten that he is funny man.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

The mountainous opposition to Quay in
Pennsylvania is rapidly subsiding to hole
in the ground, and it won't be Quay that
falls into it
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Fruit shipments to London may result
in loss now and then, but in the end
there viii be profit enough in the trade to
make up for the damage.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

The future historian will wonder why,
with an intelligent people and honest off,
Gals, the State of California could never
make the Southern Pacific Railroad pay its
taxes.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

If there are any reasons why special IA
vors should be granted to the Market-street
Railway Company they have never been
made public, SO they must have been
pocketed.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Miss Gertrude Vanderbilt received
$25, 900 worth of bouquets at her coming
out partV
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

ALL persons afflicted with dyspepsia will find
immediate relief and sure cure by using Dr..
Segert's Angostura Bitters.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Mrs. Wentworth, Philadelphia widow, sur
prised her friends by decorating her bicycle
with crepe when she went cycling q few days
after the death of her husband.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

There is no reason why the Emperor
Williams celebration of the German war
fetes should be regarded as offensive to
France, any more than the celebration of
the fall of the Bastile in France should be
offensive to the Emperor. The one COM
memorates the establishment of German
unity and the other the accomplishment of
French liberty. Both nations have right
to rejoice. and neither has a right to kick.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

In asserting that he intended to pull the
nose Of Fitzsimmons as a playful joke
Gentleman Jim has set up as an American
humorist on plan that is liable to result
In sprained humerus before he goes far.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

Carl Browne has sent shudder through
the East by issuing manifesto in which
he refers to himself as poet, painter and
puncturer of pompous pride, of political
puppets and pusillanimous poltroons of
purse-proud plutocracy.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

The industrial exposition this year will
furnish good starting point from which
to measure the growth of home manufac-
lures under the impulse of the new re-
vival. of industry, and every year should
show something in the way of increase
and Improvement
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
Extra fine molasses buttercups. Townsends.*

ROBERTS, card headquarters, 22o suffer.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

The complaint that California fruit is
not packed web enough for the London
market emphasizes the need for improv-
ing that part of the industry. In the girls
who work in the orchards and canneries
we have the most intelligent and best edu-
Gated labor in the world, and with a little
teaching we ought to be able to send out
the most carefully and artistically packed
fruit that reaches any market.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

1t is gratifying to learn that Governor
Budd is better, and that the doctors have
little doubt of his speedy recovery. 1t is
certainly the general hope that our first
native son Governor will be able to fulfill
his duties and leave the office at the close
Of his term with his native vigor unbroken
and unimpaired.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

BACON Printing company. SOB Clay street.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

During the thirty years Ainsworth r. Spot
ford has been Librarian of Congress the mum
Der of books in his charge has increased from
10000 to 100000.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

"Mary," said the sick man to his wife, when
the doctor pronounced it case of smallpox,
''if any of my creditors call, tell them that am
at last in condition to give them something"
London Tit-Bits.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13

In the opinion of Andrew Lang, Horace
Howard Furness of Philadelphia, the Shakes
perian scholar, is the greatest American.
The San Francisco call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1895-1913, 1895-08-13
SUBSCRIPTION RATEs-Postage Free:

EDITORIAL ROOMS:
517 Clay Street.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1895-04-03
Make Convicts Pay Their WAY.

Next to Denver Washington is call
ed by many the most beautiful city in
the United States. Its clean, wide av-
enues and streets cannot be sufficiently
admired by those who come from
places where the highways are crook
ed, narrow, broken and dirty. Wash
ington roads and streets are built
by workhouse convicts, mostly black
they seem to be, as their dark figures.
clad in stripes, move to and fro busy as
ants. North Carolina presents an OBJ
ject lesson and the model system Of
roadmaking to her sister States. Her
convicts will hereafter work on the
public highways. The problem Of
finding employment for penitentiary
prisoners and yet not having them
come in competition with honest labor
is thus solved at one stroke. New
York. Texas and Ohio are considering
the establishment of the same system.
It is so admirable that the wonder is
all the States did not inaugurate it
long ago. Criminals ought not to be
permitted to eat their heads off in pris
on at public expense growing lazler
and more worthless every day. Nei-
ther should they be leased out to ras-
cally contractors who get their work
for nothing while honest laborers
starve. No! Put them on the public
highways The counties and States are
too poor to pay for making and mend
ing roads properly. Here is labor al
ready to their hand that Will not need
to be paid for. At the same time the
convicts will get the discipline of reg
ular work in the open air. 1t will be
the making of many of them.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1895-04-03
Objected,

Rev. J: NJ. W. Deshong preached
with great fire and zeal to a colored
congregation IN Fayetteville. Tenn.
Colored people like fire and zeal, and
for time the Rev. Deshongs sermons
had great acceptance. Sinners were
awakened, and at the altar of peni
tence they howled nightly as the
good work went on. With the zeal Of
a martyr Rev. Deshong began to weed
out the sinners in his congregation
from the saints. Il divide you into
sheep and goats he said In the
last great day the sheep will sit on
the right hand and the goats on the
left. Next Sunday l will read out
loud to YOU from this pulpit a list of
the sheep and another Of the goats in
my congregation. Next Sunday the
church was crowded All Fayette-
vile wanted to know particularly who
the sheep were and still more particu
larly who were the goats. Brer De-
shong read out the lists as he threat
ened On the goat list were the names
Of some of the most prominent colored
ladies OF the congregation. These dear
sisters fired up at being called goats
before all the people. Their rage sur
passed even their Christianity, and
one night they got another goat pre-
sumably Of the male persuasion, to
shoot at Brer Deshong as he reposed in
his room after the labors of the day
were over. But the bullet did not hit
Berr Deshong still lives to call the sis
terS goats.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1895-04-03
WHO THE BANDITS WERE.
Altruiar.

It has started up again, this time in
sonoma county, Cal. It is about SO
miles north of San francisco. 1t is an
organization formed to realize perfect
happiness on earth by introducing as
rapidly as possible perfect systems of
production and distribution of this
worlds goods. You can become a
member Of it by paying $50. That is
to help establish the colony. Mr.. Ed
ward B. Payne, writing in The. Ameri-
can Magazine Of Civics, says that the
aim of the colony is to make all its
members comfortable as to enjoyment
of this worlds goods, but the greater
thought is to make social life strong,
beautiful and sweet and individual ex-
perience, free, joyous and noble" It
is to be hoped by all means that the
Altruria colony will succeed in doing
this. There is need of it. Every Al
turian. male or teu,ale, has just the
same righ:.s The allowance of
wealth out of the common stock" will
be exactly the same for every member.
There can be no Gould millions on the
one hand and men blowing their
brains out because they are starving
on the other. The colony already has
a membership Of 35-25 grown people,
10 chil Iren Farming and a chicken
ranch have been started. There are
also a cooperative blacksmith shop,
furniture factory and. grocery. The
coionists are publishing paper, The
Alturian. May these gentle, kindly.
honest people realize every one of
their golden dreams. But we give
them three years of colony life almost
before they breakup.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1895-04-03
= Novel Case.


CONCORD, March 26.-Nashua Saw
ings Bank has been enjoined upon ap-
plication of the bank commissioners to
the court, for the reason that the de-
mand made by its depositors upon the
bank for thir deposits is such that the
bank is unable to meet them without
selling its securities at a sacrifice. The
bank has in round numbers 81, 600,0 900
of deposits. Application for the in
junction was made solely because of
the run upon the bank by its deposit
ors. The bank had already borrowed
$50, 900 to meet these demands. The
assets of the bank. at conservative
appraisal, are more than sufficient to
pay all claims.
The Manning times. [volume] (Manning, Clarendon County, S.C.) 1884-current, 1895-04-03
4 Niger In The Tood-Pile.

Gov. O'Ferrell of Virginia, enter
tained a negro unawares at the Execu
tive Mansion last week. He was asked
by friend to entertain committee of
the Massachusetts, legislature who
were junpeting in the south ostonsibly
looking into the causes of the migra-
ton of New England cotton mills to
this section, and, not Knowing that
Mr. Teamoh, a gentleman of color, :"
was one Of the honorables fixed an
hour at which he would entertain at
luncheon, the committee. To the sur
prise of all, it seems, and to the deep
disgust Of the Governor and
Mrs. O'Ferrall who was also
introduced to the committee, the
colored ''gem'ea' put in an
appearance, coming from the wood
pile, so to speak, which to say the least
threw a cloud over the scene. Moth
ing butsouthern good needing prevent
ed an explosion on the spot, thought
the i'll treated Governor has
been letting off, considerably
since, and we think with, sufi-
cient cause 1t further appears
that the white committeeman en-
deavored to sidetrack Or telescope the
colored member, or lose him at Raleigh
and on finding him again with them
at Richmond, expressed their sincere
regrets and apologized to the Governor
though or returning home they made
light of the matter and in published
interviews said that the Governor enter
tanned the negro knowingly he having
been, they say, told that Teamoh would
be present. This vemin the Governor
resents in sharp letter to the chair
man Of the committee, stating that no
part of such a statement is true. He
acknowledges that he made the best of
an awkward position under official
duress," as it were, and promises to
be more careful hereafter.