Democratic messenger. [volume] (Snow Hill, Md.) 1869-1973, 1895-05-18
WHEN TO ARRIVE.
A Point In Etiquette That Novices Find
Hard to Learn.


Much experience Of social functions,
large and small, is needed to enable an
arrival to be thoroughly well timed
neither a moment too soon nor 700 late.
To arrive, say, little before or even pro-
cisely ut u quarter to O'Clock the
hour named on a dinner invitation card
has quite provincial air on the face of
it and is embarrassing to both hostess
and guest 1t was not intended that the
hour should be taken literally ON the
stroke of the clock On the contrary, it
was meant that quarter of an hours
grace should DO given 10 insure pune
tuality. Occasional diners out, fearful
OF being too late or IA little late, have
knack of arriving painfully early, be-
fore either host or hostess have descend
ed to the drawing room, and the wait
to these guests, however short it may
be, appears 10 them the longest five
minutes ever spent The host and host
ess are ruffied at not being found ut
their post and the guests full of apollo
gies for having called them to it There
is no time in the day when few min
utes one way or tho other possess more
significance than those that precede the
dinner hour. and so thoroughly is this
understood by society that no one wish
es for an enforced tete-a-tete with q
host or hostess by being overpunctual
and arriving before the orthodox quar-
ter of an hour has begun its course So
strictly is this unwritten rule with re-
gard to these few minutes observed that
hidden guest will undergo much in
convenience rather than infringe it.
A man who knows his world and tho
exact moment to arrive will relate how
during n cab strike he allowed good
half hour in which TO walk from his
own house to that of his host, but unex-
pectedly meeting with handsom he
thoughtlessly engaged it and fonnd him.
self landed ut the door u good 90 min
utes before the dinner hour Rather than
transgress fashions law or explain his
presence at so early ali hour he walked
around and up and down and at length
aroused the suspicious of policeman.
who kept watchful eye upon him I'M
til he disappeared within the portals of
his friends house, making. as was his
wont, n we'll timed arrival, neither dis
conceriing his entertainers by arriving
too soon nor causing them annoyance by
arriving late.
This rule in the matter of arriving
does not apply i'll the same way TO in
vitations TO balls and dances. The hour
named ON the card is the one at which
hostess would be most pleased TO well
come her guests, but they, on the con-
trary, have decided distaste to warm
ing rooms, +" rs it is termed, and prefer
TO make mere distingue entree some
half TO three-quarters OF an hour later,
when the rooms are comparatively well
filled.
To arrive at an afternoon lat home"
punctually ut the hour named on the
cards would not surprise the hostess.
but it would be unfashionable-a word
which means much-and decidedly dis
concerning TO those who thus arrive. Ii
! generally leads to dull half hour of iso-
lation which might have been avoided.
Early arrivals are usually those very in
innate with hostess, aud with whom
she has much in common. These are
privileged TO arrive early and pay no
penalty for so doing-that of conspicuous
solitude--a thing quite distinct from
solitude in crowd.
The obligation TO arrive within five
minutes of the hour named when an in
yitation to luncheon is concerned is i'm
perative. No latitude is implied in this
case, and punctuality is compliment
and necessity. ON the ground that the
time allowed for luncheon is brief, and
that the meal would be all but over il
an arrival is long delayed. it not being
customary to wait for lunhceon guests,
and 80 or o'clock signifies that the
guests will sit down to luncheon with
out a moments delay.
Again, the hour named in an invita-
ton TO be present at wedding cere-
mony must DO taken literally, and if
2:30 p IN. is stated 2:30 p. m Is actu-
ally intended, and here also the arrival
should be before the hour. not after il,
say, within 10 to 10 minutes, to allow
time for finding seats before the cere-
mony commences.
When to arrive is i'll itself but small
matter, but one of some importance
when taken in the aggregate. London
Queen.