The representative. [volume] (St. Paul, Minn.) 1893-1901, 1895-05-01


Jimson-Now. you wouldn't marry me.
would you?
Miss Sears-Most certainly not. but
why do you ask such a question:?
Jimson-Just to decide a bet.-Kate
Fields Washington
Darling" he cried. ''then you have
enough confidence in me to marry me?"
No" replied the practical girl. "but
have enough confidence in myself."-De-
troit Tribune.
There is curious report of a dialogue
in the China Medical Missionary Jour
nal.
Doctor-H'm. You are run down. sir;
you need an ocean voyage. What is
your business?
Patient-Second mate of the Anna Ma
ria. just in from Hong Kong.
Minnie-I wonder if there is any truth
in this theory that tobacco will kill mi
crobes?
Mamie-Of course not. Charlie Lite
wayte has been smoking q pipe for more
than Embellishments Journal.
Mary had little hen i
With feathers white as snow,
And every time she won fight
She tried but failed to crow.
Boston Courier.
kcAlC was lily Ing W CAPIdlA " uCI CAdoo
Of East side children the meaning of
"sinecure' without mentioning the word
NOW. children, if man would pay
you dollar a day just to sit at the win
dow and look out, what would that be?"
THAT would be bully!' cried a little
girl.
Hush. dear, that is slang, and you
mustn't use slang. Why. it would be
s-i-n-'
"Oh, teacher, I known shouted 10.
year-old boy, lit would be cinch.'
And the teacher was fain to acknOwl-
edge to herself that it might come un-
der that head.-New York Recorder.
Don't you think look sweeter than I
used to look?" asked Evelyn "a most orig
inal little mortaD of her former nurse.
why. yes" answered the latter.
do you know what makes it?" de-
manded the child
mo, my DEAR what is it?' and the in
FAINT answered: Thought of Jesus, and
the new way I wear my hair. New
York Tribune.
Mr.. Shandy (petulantly, from his pill
low)-Ethel. know I heard a noise. I'm
sure there's woman in the house. I
won't sleep a wink unless you go down
and see!
DIN it all, Willie, If you bother me
like this again I'll send you back to your
father!-New York Herald.
Grimsy-What is more annoying than
a woman with purpose?
Gassley-A woman with double pur-
pose-Boston Courier.
I felt like a king at the banquet
And got as full as a goose
This morning I'm sorry l drank it,
For the fact is l feel like the deuce.
10 o1p nj 1nC
It takes a woman to play poker. A
well-known society girl told the Scray
Bag man that she played a game with a
friend the other evening, to see who
would pay for the theater tickets.
she said, land I lost
What did he have?"
ooh, he had pair of aces, and I only
had four little bits Of twos."
And then she wondered why the Scrap
Bag man gasped for breath and leaned
Syracuse Post.
Spacervt-A man has just been Gre
mated uptown by an explosion of Greek
fire.
Editor-Give it a good show-and head
it TRANSLATED" New York World.
"They tell us" he said dreamily, that
women are SuSceptlDle 70 Hattery.
"I've heard that" said his friend
'Well, don't you believe it. 1 tried this
morning to tell my wife she was so
good looking she did not need a new
spring dress. "-Washington Star.
Mabel-Who are those two young men
opposite us?
Edith-The one asleep in the chair is
Brooklyn gentleman; the one standing is
a Philadelphian
Mabel-But how did they ever manage
to get here on time?
Edith-Oh, we sent them invitations a
month ahead.-Truth.
The widow of Richard Wagner is caus-
ing much comment by her growing &C.
centricites. She recently composed five
poems in honor of her son Siegfrieds five
dogs and recited them at his birthday re-
ception.