The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1895-10-24
Let Us All Laugh.

Ht"s Out SlllI ulNlf.t.
lie asks. "Can l be yours?"
washington Star.
VIII some fisherman kindly inform
us how the bass can reach the u,Der
sea?-BOston Transcript.
"They say that Gertrude's husband
Is almost illiteratc." WELL, he signs
n check neutrality-suspicious. Record.
Il went shooting yesterday" what,
has the game law cXpired?" "Oh, yes;
nothing else did, though."--Chicago
Record.
Smokeless powder has been introduc.
ed ut West Point. The cadets wear it
on their coat lapels after every dance
Chicago Dispatch.
The st. Louis girl wrote: "Don't rhale
to be thar" Her Kansas City beau
replied: IL will be thar: there's no such
word as phalc."-lnter Ocean.
BObby-Paw. what's the difference
between aqua and water? Paw-~The
druggist will show you, my son. that
the difference Is merely the price,
Syracuse Post.
"Never," began the philosophical
drummer, "nevcr marry u woman with
Il square, protruding chin" IL never
do" said the drummer from Chicago
Indianapolis Journal.
Fuddy-Thcrc goes Widow Grimes.
A great woman. that; always looking
out for number one. Duddy-Always
looking out for number two. you mean.
Boston Transcript.
"NO, no; l wouldn't dare to have my
husband help when we move" why
not!" Hes a depot baggageman. you
know, and he'd be sure to forget him.
self."-Chicago Record.
'Do you call Pcary's latest cxpedi-
ton to the Arctic regions a successful
onc|' asked Inland. Il do" replied
iIaklet. lie got back alive."-Pitts-
burg Chronicle Telegraph.
''Iie didn't have the sand to propose,
did he. Bessie?" Yes. but she reject
ell him. She said that while he had
tdlt SlIlu w ~ plBOSt. Ht uitl hAN CAAC
rocks to marry."--Harper's Bazaar.
Papa, | know what I'm going to buy
for your next birthday" well, what?'
"a nice painted shaving mug" but
l have a fine one now" 'Oh, I've just
broken that."-Fliegende Blaetter.
Do you hear the ocean moaning.
Ever moaning, sad and low?
IT'S because that fat old bather
Stepped upon its undertow.
University Herald.
''These Jokes about the young man
staying so late" remarked ChOllie at
about 11:5S D.. m., make me tired"
"Dcar me" said Maud Edith. II had an
idea you never got tired."-1ndianapO-
lie Journal.
'There's one good thing about the
melancholy days Of autumn said
Sneersby. What is that?' When a
maj gets a plain, ordinary cold he
can't 90 about calling it hay fever -
Washington Star.
Teacher-Are there any exceptions to
the rule that heat expands and cold
contracts? Tommy-Yes'm. The Ice
man leaves a lot bigger twenty-pound
chunk since it got colder."--1ndianap-
oils Journal. .
A short time ago a publisher brought
out a book entitled advice to Plain
Women" Only one copy has yet been
disposed of, and that was taken by the
Office boy to his mother for curl paper.
IF. B. 90 Kalendar.
"Perhaps if l were to boil it down."
suggested the space writer. wouldn't
do any good" said the obdurate edit
or. 'sTake a gallon Of water and boil 1t
down to a pint, and it would still be
nothing but water. ALBANY Argus.
"What do you think Of this previous
existence theory" Il know 1t Is to be
supported by facts. For instance, l
know a woman only p years old who
often thoughtlessly tells about things
that happened 30 years ago.'-lndian-
apOlis Journal.
81 would give the world to call you
mine" he said ardently. mo, Harold"
she answered kindly, but coldly; you
may think you would, but you wouldn't
You couldn't buy the world on eighteen
hundred dollars a year. you Know
Washington Star.
81 wouldn't worry so much about that
boy of yours at college," said the friend
of the family. Hes not a poker play
er." 81 know he isn't" replied the faith
er, ruefully, but from the size Of his
expense account I'm afraid he thinks
he is."--Chicago Evening Post.
1t hain't no use in talkin' now, they
kennOt sail n boat:
They think they've got a trOtter when
it's nuthin' but a goat.
An ef they're goin' tur git the cup for
Johnny Bulls domains,
,rbov'vo GOT IN got a hattar hOCS ~. nnSh