The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1895-08-25

and happened here This is It: A nou-
veau richie said to her: "Oh. Mrs. How
I ard, who is that young woman they are
making such a fuss about; ! never heard
OF her before; who is she?" And the an
swer came: My dear woman, I don't
know who she is any more than knew
who you were when people asked me that
last summer"
And this which is a bit Of a chestnut,
is tackled to Mrs. Stevens. too. but isn't
hers. A New York woman was at a din
ner in Boston. clumsy servant dropped
! a beautiful platter on which rested a
! boiled tongue. and shattered IL in thou
| sand pieces. The hostess never lost her
| equanimity. but said. That's nothing but
a iapsus linguea," and everybody shrek
ed with laughter The New York woman
came home, rehearsed the Incident with a
servant and at her next dinner party he
was instructed to drop the turkey. Then
she said, "Oh. that's nothing but a lapsus
| linguea, "Oh my, New York people are
so stupid; Boston people catch anything so
quickly"
| Another nouveau richie got a letter in
| which was said: Amour in England is
just now spelled fove" She thought she
would improve on it, so she wrote to an
other friend Amour in New York is just
now spelled $ove"
Silly? Perhaps. but then IT is a silly sea-
son Of the year, and little bit Of fun goes
/ a great ways have gotten to wonder
/ ing as l look at some of the women here,
/ what really constitutes style in appear
/ ance. The woman who is counted the most
! stylish looking in the place lacks youth,
lacks beauty, has only few gowns and
yet are conscious of an intangible some
thing that makes her stand
out from among all the
other women and attract your at
| tention. believe style is born with peo-
| pie. Worth used to say he could make a
| woman look like picture, but he couldn't
| give her style: Some people say that it
is In the carriage, but doubt It, 1t cam
not be analysed. But the woman who
possesses Il has a gift Of great value, for
she can idealize even a shabby gown.
| There are beautiful women who lack 1t
altogether. There are ugly women who
possess 1t to the finest degree. The famous
Princess Metternich used to say that she
knew she was as ugly as a monkey, but
that she knew that she possessed some
/ thing that was Of greater worth than
beauty, and that If she and Madame Re-
camier were in the same room she would
| be noticed first. / know a woman who is
long and thin, has small eyes and a
wretched complexion, and yet she is. with
out any doubt, the most stylish woman in
the place She holds her parasol just as
IL should be held, and she gives to her
clothes, even when they are of the sim
pleSt material, an air Of good form that
would be impossible for any other woman
BY the by, a girl had an Old Testament
on the Veranda the other day, and she
said she had discovered why Jewesses, as
a general thing, had liking for earrings.
She found that, long before the days of
Moses they were favorte love gifts
| and when Job had that bad attack Of
| boils, the friends who came to condofe
with him each brought him an earring. of
! gold L cannot understand just why an
earring was expected to express consola-
ton, unless they were to be put in the
melting pot and changed into ducats. Job
Is always referred to as the most patient
| or men, but really and truly fan to dis
1 cover how he was patient. thought to
be patient one had to endure in duietness
but he talked his woes and walled his
woes and wept his woes, and had all
! his relations, all of his friends and all
the dogs Of the neighborhood visit him
10 cheer him up. And with such a lot to
entertain him 1t seems to me that it
was his duty to forget his troubles and
make himself agreeable. Suppose we wo-
men started that kind of patience, howl
ing, moaning and talking2 / think man.
kind would, very properly, take us by
our neeks and drop us into the sea, for
the woman who dilates on her woes is
! most Objectionable. Patience to me means
as Tar as possible. concealing your trou-
oles' looking out Tor the bright side, and
| being as chirpy as a canary bird
Speaking of birds, do you think there
is anything quite so nasty as a parrot e?
/ There is woman here who has got one
and when he isn't screaming in the hoars-
| est OF tones, he is swearing in German.
or saying the alphabet. He always seems
| like such vulgar bird to me. Naturally.
! one connects him with a monkey, and If
/ there is anything on a par with him il is
that vile beast who claims to be our an
I cestor. Nh. Darwin may have had a monkey
I for his at-grand-father, but / declare
/ l didn't, and l am sure you didn't. And
still, haven't you seen men who looked
exactly like monkeys, and who had all
! their mean little ways?
And haven't you seen women with faces
like parrots and voices that were
/ high and coarse, as they seem to linRer
with delight over bit of luscious bit of
scandal?
And haven't you seen fair-haired, blue
eyed girls who looked like canary birds.
and who smooth their frocks and fix
their locks and preen away just little
bird does?
And haven't you seen men with bulldog
| faces whose jaws meant determination
and who, even when they We're kind
were gruff?
And haven't you seen women who were
| like the deer, graceful in figure, with tiny
feet and moving so. that every graceful
outline showed perfectly?
| And haven't you seen men with flowing
whiskers who looked just like Skye ter
| riers?
Oh, dear, If you start In to study out
| what all the people look like, you will
find the elephantine woman, the kangaroo
woman, the pussy cat woman, the tiger
woman, and the original serpent in the
shape of a woman. 1t is an interesting
study-the book of humanity Give your
summer days to reading it and you will
find deal of pleasure. And then we
will compare notes, you and /, and the
other woman, next winter. when you come
to have cup of tea and a bit of bread
ana butter at O'Clock with Bah.
Twenty Years on an Errand.
From the. New York Press.
Twenty years in which to do an errand IS