Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-12-06
atausiae 6atherin9s.
BY A laugh is worth 100 groans on

sa- Hear one side, and you will be
in the dark hear both sides, and all
will be clear.
nag The ancients tell us what is best
but we must learn Of the moderns
what is fittest.
Bd- There is no middle course. The
command is "Do right" To fail to
do it is to do wrong.
B6- Indications are that the PROPOSE
ton to retire greenbacks will precipi-
tate hot and time killing fight in con-
gress.
p@~ Don't get excited and talk loud.
Generally speaking, the person who
raises his voice has voice that is not
worth raising.
s8e 1t does not take very sharp eyes
to find fault anywhere, except in our
selves. Few people can turn their
eyes inward.
RS- "Take away woman," shouted
the orator, "and what would follow ?'
1--WE would" said man at the back
of the audience, promptly.
Bae The time to warn us is before we
have made our mistakes and committed
our sins. The time to teach us how to
harvest is before we have soWn our
seed.
sdF On many farms the weather
wears out more tools than use, and
wastes more food than all the stock
stock on the place. Protect your tools,
your crops and your stock.
sgr The magnitude of American mis-
sionary interests is shown by the fact
that a single. denopination-the Meth
odists-has just appropriated over
100000 for foreign missions.
sH Learning is not education. Half
of all the fools in the world are "edu-
Gated" Learning gives the means OF
acquiring that which, correctly used,
enlightens the mind.
s9 The only people who make no
mistakes are dead people. 1 saw a
man last week who had not made a
mistake for 1000 years. He was in
the Egyptian department of the Brit
ish museum.
ga Robert Collyer defined the oys-
ter plant as vegetable that is always
going to taste like al oyster, but new
er quite does it. Its promise is excel
lent; but its performance unsatisfacto-
ry.
p@ Apples are nutritious, medicinal,
and vitalizing; they aid digestion,
clear the voice, and correct the acidity
of the stomach. An apple contains as
much nutriment as potato in a pleas
anter and more wholesome form.
s9 Paris women, who wear bloomers
or knickerbockers when riding bicycles,
will be disqualified from receiving the
sacraments of the church, according to
the instructions issued to the clergy by
the cardinal archbishop of Paris.
a9 Judge-What is the use of ap-
pointing a receiver for this corpora
tion ? There is nothing left to receive.
Lawyer-Your honor, l will show by
numerous cases that it is not custom
ary to appoint receiver while there
is anything left to receive.
H@ "Do you have any friends in
school of your own size, Johnny?"
"Yes; they're the only kind I've got. !"
"Why, how is that" "I've licked all
of 'em littler'n me, and been licked by
all of 'em that's bigger"
"When did we receive this
poem ?" asked the great magazine edit
or, as he shook the dust from faded
manuscript. "It was during the war
of 1872" replied his aged assistant.
"Well, return it at once. There is no
need to keep the author in suspense !"
p9 In various ways the circus of the
present day differs from that Of the
past but the ring remains unchanged
it is always 42 feet 9 inches in diane
ter. Go where you will, search the
world from end to end, and never a
circus will you find without ring 42
feet inches in diameter.
Bag "Come around next Saturday
week, Hawkins. My wife and | are
going to celebrate our silver wedding" !"
"Silver wedding? Why, you haven't
been married more than II years" 81
know it; but silver has deprecated.
It's only now II where it used to be
TO be 25."
a6~ A droll fellow fished a rich old
gentleman out of millpond, and re-
fused the offer of 25 cents from the
rescued miser. "Oh, that's too much ~
exclaimed he, 'tain't worth it !" and
he handed back 81 cents, saying calm
ly as he pocketed 4 cents, "That's
about right"
sg A good mother was hearing her
little child repeat the Lords prayer
the other night. AS the child hesitat-
ed bit over the expression, "Forglve
us our trespasses," she interrupted
long enough to ask, "Do you under.
stand, dear, what 'trespass' means -
"Oh, yes" replied the little one, lit
means keep off the grass"
ga Roger Bacon was the first to
suggest the use of spectacles. When
they came into use in Italy, about the
year 1885, on the recommendation OF
Alessandro di Spina, a monk OF Pisa,
women were forbidden TO wear them,
l. -. 81 For Il