Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1895-11-15
N'ashlngton Staudard
THAT STON +.
WiggIC>WOrth Thought He Knew
How to Set 1tlp.

B-r-r-r-r!" Numbered Mr.. Wig
ellsworth a. he came in from the
office. 1.-The house is colds a.
barn,
| know it, SAID Mrs. Wiggles-
worth pulling shawl more closely
about her, | sent Willie. down TO
the store for a man to come and
set up the little parlor stove, bnt
he was too busy to-day
What You want to run into ex-
penSe like that tor?" demanded
Mr.. Wigglesworth virtuously.
Amt they crowd enough of Us.
Id like TO know, to set up an 50
pound stove without paying man
s. to come aud leave and impress
sion of his smutty land on the
parlor paper?'
But it amt BACKED" said Mrs.
Wigglesworth.
Well, why amt it," said Mr..
Wigglesworth. What's that hired
girl doing, I'd like to ask, that she
can't find time to smear a little
backing around where it's needed?
Been putting a full library binding
on one of those fireproof pies, |
s'pose, Or arranging a loaf of her
impervious cake. Where is that
stove?"
He charged out into the shed,
where the stove was discovered,
after a considerable search, buried
under a wealth of debris such as
the North American shed knows
SO well how to accumulate.
You're dandy housekeeper,
amt you?" growled Mr.. Wiggles-
worth as he fought his way toward
the stove, while his wife stood on
a box and volunteered advice.
Always have things handy, you
do! Hints Oh Housekeeping by
Mrs. Wigglesworth, in two vol
umes, with full glossary and key.
Specially recommended for young
people who have their own house
and want to keep it themselves.
That's what you are"
To this sort of running accom-
paniment Mr.. Wigglesworth
snatched his way through the
debris, pausing now and then,
when he encountered an ambushed
nail to put his fingers into his
mouth and imparting thereby a
weird tone to the how that he gave
vent to.
"Who nailed the thing DOWN.
he angrily called as he finally got
in where his hands could grip the
stove. He was bent over in the
most painful manner, which af
forded him but little breath to
spare. Everybody knows how
mad that makes a man.
Il think" Mrs. Wigglesworth
timidly ventured, that it's heav-
Ter than you thought"
"Oh, yes growled Mr.. Wiggles-
worth, "you're a great thinker, you
are. You're the woman that
stands around on ono foot think
ing up things for the poor. I've
read about you in the literary re-
views. Thoughts That Mrs. Wig
ellsworth Has Thought OF! Par
ticularly designed for people who
have to have their thinking done
elsewhere! All you want to do is
to get Mr.. Gladstone to read one Of
your books and your fortunes
made. Why don't you come and
catch hold here?" he yelled.
"Mercy!" CALCULATED Mrs. Wig
ellsworth. startled from her perch
by the intensity of her husbands
command. Il didn't know yor
wanted me to help"
What's the reason you didn't?'
returned Mr.. Wigglesworth
"Think I've got the only back il
the family that needs breaking
Want me to pull my arms out t.
double length, don't you, SOS yor
can use me to feel around on the
top shelves of closets and fine
things? That's what you want"
It's--it's awful heavy" com
planned Mrs. Wigglesworth as sh.
bent over and fastened her GRASP
on the iron edge.
"Poh!" shifted her husband
There you 60 first thing, finding
fault. Why don't you lift and no
stop to growl so much?"
The setting sun, looking negli
gently in at the cobwebbed win
dow, impaired an almost unearthly
radiance to the distorted counter
ance of Mr.. Wigglesworth as he
strained at the refractory stove
and so set noble example to biz
wife, which that worthy woman SC
ably emulated as to burst botf