The Scranton tribune. [volume] (Scranton, Pa.) 1891-1910, 1895-03-16
THE COMING WOMAN.
Gibes and Comment Concerning the
Latest Development OF the Creature.

One Of the advanced women claims
that the future man will have a sixth
sense. A sense of his inferiority, We
uppose.-Albany Argus.
Chicago girls ought to be eligible for
football, if what we hear about their
feet is trde.-Pittsburg Chronicle Tele-
graph.
1t is a terrible thing to think that
in the future the money a woman
makes by keeping a cow may go to her
political constituents instead of being
spent to buy comforts for her family
Atchison Globe.
"Why does Madge always wear yell
low chrysanthemum9 ."
1T reminds her of her best young
man. You see he's blonde and plays
football."-Chicago Record.
81 wonder you women never learn
how to get off a street car
"Umph! Ii we got off the right way,
it wouldn't be long before they'd quit
stopping the cars for us."-Buffalo'
Courier.
Woman has great advantages in the
location and concealment of her
pockets. She can slide out of bed at
midnight and find her husbands
pockets in two seconds. He cannot find
her pockets in six months and when he
does he can't get into it."-Dallas News.
Maud-"I have just received an offer
of marriage which came by post this
morning. He said that his love for me
was very great but that his income was
small"
Marie-"What a pity! Whom was it
FROM"
Maud-"I really did not notice. That
was enough. boston Home Journal.
Matron-"Has my husband voted
yet?"
Ward Worker-"Yes, ma'am. Early
this morning"
That settles 1t. He has voted the
very way l didn't want him to. He is
always in a contrary mood in the morn
ing. l had some hopes of keeping him
away until the middle of the after
noon."-Indianapolis journal.
"Are you going out tonight, dear?"
said the husband to the emancipated
woman.
81 am. 1t is the regularly weekly
meeting of the lodge"
"Then l want to say to you''-and
there was an unusual defiance in tho
mild MANS fnnn-'I N that
If you are not at home by IL o'clock L
shall go home to my father."-Judge.
Yes" said Mrs Noutaire, 81 told Mrs.
Candidayte that If she,,was going to
be elected she would have to go down
into her boomers and dig up her good
hard money. The girls all expect to get
new hat out of the election, and IL
Mrs. Candidayte expects to get in she
will have to start her bonnet foundry
going"
That's very true" replied Mrs. Elec-
tionere. Mrs. Runner out in the ninth
precinct of the Seventeenth, has bale
of ribbon on tap and the girls are just
helping themselves. Mrs. Runner is go
ing in with rush. Now, there is Mrs.
Jenness- Baker, in the Twelfth, who has
put up nothing but rooster feathers.
and the ladies are extremely indignant.
She Is sure to be defeated. Mrs. New
man Smart has distributed ostrich
plumes and has roll of dress goods
free for every voter to help herself"
Mrs. Voutaire:-"Too true--too true!
Still still | don't know. Where would
our poor woman get her millinery If we
didn't have an election now and then?
Minneapolis Journal.
"And have a right" she asked, In
trembling voice, "the right of suffrage?"
"You have"
"Are you sure?" she faltered. 'Is IL
really true?" ...s...
"Yes." r
She raised her streaming eyes to-
heaven.
AT last" she murmured, "at last
may be registered as something besides
John Jones and wife"
Then she wept for joy.-Detriot Trib-
une.
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or brulse, cut or burn, Thomas Eclectric
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ideal family liniment.