Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1895-12-19

Mr.. Moon, who was a man for an
emergency, CALAMITY rushed to the
rescue. He seized Santa's ankles and
pulled with all the force of a pair of
gymnasium educated arms, but he did
not seem to make any Roadway. for
Santa yelled in a voice that sounded
like a doleful cry from sthe tomb that
he was being wedged in tighter than
ever, and he implored the company to
do something for his relief.
The elders held a council of war.
Mr.. Brewster mildly suggested that it
would be good plan to send in a fire
alarm, but his wife crushed him with
look, and said that the only way she
saw was to take the bricks out of the
chimney; and she added: This comes
of a man trying to act the fool when
he ought to be thinking of the world
to come"
Meanwhile Santa groaned and
shrieked in a fearful manner in the
chimney, and protested that if he
wasn't soon released he would be
corpse. Mrs. Bell was fainting COM
fortably in her armchair, and most of
the children had vanished 1t was
then that Miss Rose approached Mr..
Moon, wringing her hands and weep
ing beautifully.
Mr.. Moon" she cried, you see the
sufferings of my uncle, and you stand
here idle. Can you not rescue him"
Miss Rose" said the intrepid young
man, Il can get him out of that in five
minutes; it rests with you whether I
shall do it or not. The last time I
proposed to you, you refused me, as
usual. If you'll promise to marry me,
I'll rescue your uncle; if you won't, I
leave this town forever-and your
uncle in the chimney. His kicks are
growing feeble and labored; I don't
think he can last more than three
minutes
The young lady leveled a glance of
scorn at him that should have with
cred him, but he stood firm. He felt
that his whole future was at stake,
and reflected that alls fair in love and
war. There was a stern, cold silence
for minute or two. Meanwhile the
vibrations of Santas legs became
desultory and spasmodic, and his muf-
fed groans betokened extreme ex-
haustion.
''Wretchr' cried the young lady, at
last, rescue my uncle! You shall
have the reward you ask
The wretch bowed With noble grace
and a moment later was on the roof,
with a rope in his hand; he let the
rope down the chimney, and called to
Santa Claus to grasp it and hang on
Santa did so, and toiled upward while
Mr.. Moon pulled; after Is minutes of
distressing work, Santa emerged from
the chimney, a poor, battered eff1gy Of
himself. Mr.. Moon assisted him to
the ground and into the house, where
the children and the other guests
crowded about him and laughed for
children always will laugh when they
ought to weep.
When Mr.. Bell was recovered suffi-
GENTLY, he leaned against the back of
a chair-he was too weak for an atti-
tude-and said:
children, if you tell above this
around town, I'll have you all arrested
and sent to the penitentiary for life
And you, Johnnie, for that litter I'll
make you saw a cord of green wood
want you all to go home and tell your
parents that Santa Claus is the biggest
hoax of the 18th century, and I'll guar
antee every word you say"
By careful nursing Mr. Bell was re-
stored to his normal health in a few
days, and his first act was to have the
old chimney taken down.
One day in March Mr.. Moon led his
bride to the altar; he held his head
high and his eye sparkled. After the
ceremony there was a dinner at Mr..
Bells residence, and Mr.. Bell himself
was radiant with good humor and hos
p1tality. He called the young couple
aside, and INDUCED in an attitude and
a speech:
MY beloved ones" he began, "the
morning of life opens radiant to you;
sunlight glimmers upon the waters,
there are blue skies overhead, and-er
the robin redbreasts are twittering
on the boughs. But dark days of tenn
pest and storm may come; rolling
waves may threaten your bark, and
then remember that if you need a
helping hand, you may call upon Rufus
Bell"
Mr.. Moon looked dreamily out of the
window.
MAY I ask a favor of you now?" he
asked.
GA hundred Of them, my dear boy"
well, [ see it's showing, and there's
enough on the ground to make sleigh
ing. Will you lend us your reindeer
and sled for awhile?"
CHRISTMAS.