The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1895-10-31

IN some way IL possible. Flowing will
be done by middle aged ladies in peas
ant costume and Tyrolean red morocco
slippers. It will be first class in every
way, and I am told that to stage this
farm will cost for costumes alone over
$50, 900.
Turkeys with pale blue watered rib
bons will eat bird seed and cutie bone,
and the maid will regularly give them
fresh copy Of the Sunday paper to car
pet their coop. No gobblers will be per-
mitted on the place, and the animals
will be shot as soon as competent au-
thority has decided that they are such.
There will be no Growing, no neighing,
no believing, no cooling. All will be at
peace.
Mixed farming and stock growing
will be the principal industries. The
milkmaids will dress picturesquely in
beautiful white tarlatan chemisettes and
duck trousers They will also wear kip
boots run down at the heel. DR.. Walker
says their idea is to get some Italian
COWS and raise Italian cream for the
Oswego market.
No one can feel more interest in this
great enterprise than the low, coarse
man farmer who has not been able to
make farming pay.
DR.. Walker thinks that much may be
saved by blowing out the contents of
hen eggs for kitchen use and then pre-
serving the shells for use at Eastertide.
She has many such schemes for practical
economy.
She is greatly worried at present over
the question of whether sawbuck
should be admitted to the wood shed and
will submit it to her chorus of shep-
herdesses. think that these questions
of propriety will gradually give place
to those of diet and the food supply.
The chief agriculturist has already
planted row of powdered rhubarb SO
as to have earlier pies than any of the
neighbors. Most Of the vegetable garden
is planted to sweet peas. An old bed of
Johnnie Jumps-up, or whatever the
plural of that word may be, has been
torn out by the roots and the place satu-
rated with boiling water.
N. B.-Popcorn will not be planted.
DIR. Walkers first act of ownership on
taking charge of the farm and tucking
in the edges of the mortgage so that it
would cover the entire place was to take
off her smoking jacket and cut down
an old pawpaw tree that had stood
there for years. When she got it down,
the stump looked as though beaver
had gnawed it off.
This particular farm was chosen be-
cause it is in summer time enameled
with daisies and great stately rocks COW
cred with soft gray moss to break up the
monotony and farming tools Of the agri-
culturist.
Hens will be taught to provide worms
for themselves, and a spirit of indie.
pendence among all the fowls will be
fostered and encouraged. BOOSTERS who
have been in the habit of calling public
attention to a large fat bug and then
eating it with vulgar joy will get their
necks rang.
Unhappy married men will be per.
mitted to look over the fence and rail al
their hard lot on Tuesdays and Fridays.
Socials and sociables for the spread Of
the gospel in New Jersey will be held
ON the first Monday of the month, and
married men who have led an exemplary
life will be permitted to put theil
money through crack in the fence.
Women who are living unhappily
with their husbands are invited to come
to the farm and pull stumps for thei,
board.
A severe penalty will be enforced
against any member who may carry on
a correspondence with outside people oil
an antagonistic sex. Such one so of
Tending shall ON conviction be required
to break steers during the daytime and
answer the burg lar alarm of nights.
Two sets Of books will be kept fo1
the farm-one for the receipts aud ont
for the expenditures. These will be KEEP,
by two different members through the
year, each in ignorance of the other.
books, and at the end of the year the ont
having the largest total will receive &
pair of neatly embroidered snspenders
This plan will be a revelation to book
keepers, for it not only stimulates the
accountant, but would seem to aim q
deathblow at collision and consequen,
fraud.
Should this venture prove successful
and solve that great question of chow
to make the farm pay" graduates from
this institution will be employed, it is
thought, by unsuccessful farmers every
where. The coming farmland, there.
fore, will be ray of forked sunlight
upon the path Of the husbandman. The
wife will no longer elope with the farm
hand, and outdoor life will win many
young men from the card table and the
flowing bowl.
It is to be hoped for many reasons
that DR.. Walker may succeed in this
enterprise and that the earnest woman
~ - s..