Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1895-11-07
Among theyprophe}s5of today
Which men are aggrandizihg,

Among theyprophefsSof today
Which men are aggrandizihG
The greatest profit, so they say.
Is that called Advertising.
West Union Gazette.
There Is a difference between cold
and the grip, but you will not realize
1t until YOU receive the doctors BILL
Truth.
The Wife-How did you come to pro-
pose to me, John? The Husband-I
wanted to be different from other men.
/ suppOse.-Lffe.
All our Arctic explorers have enjoyed
one important advantage; ip their dead
Hest perils they always keep COOL
New York Ledger.
Brown-Our candidate says the sal
airy Of the office Is NO object to him.
Jones-I suppose he has an eye on tho
enthusiastically Life.
"See here, You impostor, you've beg.
ged from me four times In the last ten
days" "Huh! Yer amt got no kick;
| yer amt CLINE a ceut-"--Chieago REQ
ord.
"My rich uncle il dead" HE left
you something, did he notT Yes"
'Good! What did he leave your "Pen-
ndless." Pittsburg Chronicle-Tele-
| graph.
"Going to live In the country, eh2"
Eyes" II suppose the city air doesn't
agree with your familyT "Well, city
airs don't agree with my pocketbOok."
Truth.
| Merritt-Under the circumstances,
why don't you go West and get d.
vorce? Cobwigger-Because II had
a divorce l might be fool enough to
marry again.-Life.
This Is hard world" murmured the
young man. "Yes," replied she, zone
doesn't realize how hard 1t Is till one
falls or bicycle once or twice a week"
| Washington Star.
Teacher-Can you explain how tho
world is divided? Willie with very i'm
portant air)-Between them that's got
1t and them that would like to have it
-Harper's Round Table.
mo, Willie, DEAR" said mamma, mo
more cakes tonight. Don't you know
you cannot sleep on a full stomachw
"Well," replied Willie, II can sleep on
my k"-Harper's Round Table.
Once more the genial candidate,
Both gracious and astute,
Puts up his campaign promises
In packages to suit.
Washington Star.
Smith, see that Jones was at that
| dinner the other night What did he
| think of the speeches? Brown-When
/ saw him he was just going to read
them in morning paper.-Brooklyn
! Life.
81 suppose you have forgotten that
you owe me $1O," said Phillips, severe
ly. "No, l haven't" retorted Wilbur.
II meant to have done so. Give me
time, old man, and 1 will."-Harper's
Bazaar.
She-My mother is so particular abont
the young men go with. He-But she
doesn't object to me, does she? She
Oh, dear, no! She says she, knows ypu
are perfectly harmless.-New York
Herald. m.-, ~ ls 'se@ ~.
Miss Ingenue ION q ,yachtJSs1s there
really a cable in the. ocedn?s Sailor
Yes, mum. Miss Ingenue with convic-
ton, after studying the man at the
wheel)-Then that must be the grip
man.-Brooklyn Life.
She-Did you know that Miss VIII
lowsnap has been taking lessons In Del
sarte? He-Oh, yes; she showed me
how to sit down the other night. She
She didn't show you how to get up,
did she?-New York Herald.
The girl to her doting father brings
Her love with fond salute;
But as time goes on there's change in
things
She brings him lover to boot!
Judge.
Ethel Gotrox-Papa, you must let me
marry Jack. He says he positively
cannot live without me another day.
| Old Gotro1-This Is more serious than
I thought 1t was. had no idea he was
so hard up as that.-New York Herald.
She-Well, If can't live on my in
come, and you can't live on yours,
where would be the advantage in our
marrying? He thoughtfulfy)-Wel
by putting our incomes together one OF
MS would be able to live, at any rate
Harlem Life.
THAT was very kind of your uncle
10 pay your debts>~ "Humphi I don't
think 80. He might have given me the
money and let me pay 'em-" what
difference would that have nader 1T
would have re-established my credit
-Harper's Bazaar. .ts
what we need to do" said the new
director. "is to establish a sinking
fund" "Humphw said the old director.
when you've been in here q while
longer you'll have more sense. What
we need Is a fund that can keep its
head above water."-Harper's Bazaar.
You can trust the man who sings at
his work." said the CHEEKY citizen.
EYES," replied Sinnicker; 81 wish
some one would persuade the man who
works around my wood pile two or
three nights week to sing loud enough
| for me to hear him. "-Washington Star.
why Nothing Happened.
Once n CARELESS man went IN tho