The Louisiana Democrat. [volume] (Alexandria, La.) 1845-1918, 1895-12-04
TOLD BY AN OLD SNOWMAN.
Three Brief but Interesting Stories About
the Ways of the MONKEY.

Three Brief but Interesting Stories About
the Ways of the Monkey.
Speaking of monkeys" said the
ole Snowman, I'VE had about 80 OF
them once in a big cage with q shelf
along each side, up high, for them
to lie on and a little dead tree with
tho ends of the branches sawed off
standing in the middle for them to
climb up to the shelves by and to
hang on to by their tails if they
wanted to-. One day we set in on
the bottom of the cage a champagne
bottle filled with very highly fer
mented root beer, and with the cork
held in with a cord tied with a bow
knot. The monkeys got up on the
shelves and up in the tree and
looked down on this bottle very sus-
piciously. Finally their curiosity
got the better of them, and they
camo down and moved around the
bottle to inspect it. At last they
got near enough to touch it and han
die it, and finally they upset it over
on its side. Then n of the mon
keys began pulling at the string,
with the rest all clustered around.
At last he pulled the knot loose, and
bang went the cork and away went
the beer. The first rush Of it knock
ed over three or four of the monkeys
nearest IL muZzle Of the bottle, and
itdrenchod half dozen of them and
wet all Of them more OF less, for it
went through the bunch of monkeys
like a puff OF. smoke, scattering and
flying in all directions. An instant
later tho monkeys were up the tree
and lying along the. shelves. There
was nothing left On the floor IF the
cage but the empty bottle.
"a number of times after thatwe
set bottles of beer out III the sun to
ferment and then set them IN tho
cage, but the monkeys never would
touch them: We could set the bot
Ties in, but we couldn't make the
monkeys pull the string,
''Ihero was a lady standing in
front of the cage one day who had
on a hat with a big bunch of red
cherries and a lot of flowers on the
topof it. A monkey reached through
tho bars and grabbed the cherries.
Tho>lady pulled back, but tho mon:
key held on and pulled the hat off
and tried to drag it through the bars
into the cage. Three or four other
visitors standing near rushed upand
grabbed the hat, and they pulled
ono way while the monkey pulled the
other. They finally got the hat away
from the monkey and returned it to
the lady, The cherries were about
all gone, and what there vas left of
tho rest of the hat really wasn't of
much account. The lady said she
would have to be paid for the hat,
and she made for the box Office.
"'Why, certainly, said the man
in the box Office. How much do
you value the hat?'
Five dollars the lady said, and
the box Office man handed out the
money.
The lady smiled. She was evil
dently pleased. I didn't really ex.
pect you would pay for it, she said,
and she turned to so away.
Madam said the man in the
box Office, and the lady turned
around. We'll take the hat now,
if you please
"''What?' said the lady.
1.-THE hat, if you please said
the box office man. We've paid for
it, and would like to have it,
"Of course tho lady couldn't go
away without a hat, and the upshot
of it was hat she returned the IS
and went away with the hat.
Standing in front Of the cage one
day was a man who had on a pair of
gold spectacles. A monkey reached
through and took the spectacles off
tho mans nose. The man was great
~ surprised at this, but he was a
great deal moro surprised when he
saw the monkey, still standing close
by him, push the glasses out of the
frame and put them in his mouth
and stow them away, ono in each
check, and then proceed to twist the
frames up like SO much wire into a
small bunch One of our mon went
into the cage and choked the mon
key until he got the glasses out Of
his mouth, and then he got the
frame away from him, and we re-
turned them to the owner. Of
course they were not of much use
to him in that shape, but it was the
best we could do."-New York Sun.
+ The Golf Dialect.
A drive that went like a rocket
high in the air and far, q brassey
approach and two easy puts gave
NJoono-o1l ~ 49, <: &C.,, r..