The Ely miner. [volume] (Ely, Minn.) 1895-1986, 1895-08-14
GRATEFUL BEAR CUBS.
Tale Of a Potato Field by a Man
from Slime mahoning Way.
His Uncle's Power of Remembering, His
Fathers business Idea, and His
Own Willingness to Take
HOmer's Place.

hO"CH . 4 ASacOs
Honestly" said the man from Sin
nemahoning way, II feel sorry for
this side of the mountain every time /
come over from old Sinnemahone! l
do, really! Honest, do! Why? Be
cause, in the first place, this side of the
mountain seems to feel its ittleness,
and its Observation-Disclosures,
as it were, and 1 can see it wondering
what it's on earth for. knowing that
Sinnemahone is just over beyond, kick
ing its heels in the air, so to speak.
like lamb on the hillside and swelling
up, and looking sassy, as if it might be
a steer in the oats! Aud. in the second
place, because l have noticed prepon-
derance of yaller dog on this side of
the mountain. and then this side of the
mountains bears amt up to snuff. Ill
fares the land, to fastening ills prey,
where yaller dogs accumulate and
bears amt gayr Sorry? Why, I'm SO
sorry for this side of the mountain that
if 1 had bosom of destruction with
me I'd sweep every one of your yaller
dogs into the Allegheny river yander,
and then go and drive herd of SHINE
mahoning bears over here and give you
a new start in life! Sinnemahoning
bears! Why, say, Homer made the
mistake Of his life in not waiting few
thousand years and being born on the
old Sinnemahone! Then he'd have had
something to twang his Tyre about!
He wouldn't have had to tramp bare
foot tho hills Of nd cd
cent bailiwicks, making heroes and
heroines out of more or less disrep-
utable folks, but he could have stamped
and sloshed along the storied Sinnema-
honing, in pair of cowhide boots, and
sung of bear till the cows come home!
I often lie awake nights regretting
that Homer made that mistake. Those
Sinnemahoning bears ought to have a
Homer to put 'em on record as they
should be put. But all is not lost
Homer gave old Sinnemahoning the 60
by, and preferred ancient Greece to
bears grease, but all is not lost. Old
Sinnemahone may not have Homer,
but she has Me! And if her bears don't
go down to posterity with bells on my
name amt Praxiteles Pettibone
1.-The trouble with me is, my memory
isn't long enough to do the Sinnema-
hone bear full justice. have to deal
with him as contemporary, and con-
temporaneous history is a trife dan
gerous to handle, for there are other
people who are contemporaneous, and
they may insist on proofs. 1t is much
nicer to deal with history that was
contemporaneous with your grand
father, for then the burden Of proof is
on him, and all you. have to do is to
cite authorities. Now, if l had mem
DRY like an uncle of mine once had,
could go way back beyond this ques-
ton with ease, and show up the SHINE
malone bear in a shape that would be
much more amusing than any he has
put on within my recollection, amazing
as that shape has frequently been.
That uncle of mine quit working his
memory, though, quite suddenly, and
the reaction FASTENED his death. He
was letting it h ave full sway once, and
after he had at last called it in, the
new school-teacher, who had never
heard my uncle remember before, said
to him:
"'If had your memory and fearless
ness in exercising it, 1 would write a
book and call it "Recollections of the
Deluge, by Survivor.
Somehow after that my uncle quit
remembering and went into a decline,
and never stopped this side of Jordan.
when was boy, ten years or SO
old, my father, Reuben Pettibone, said
to me one day:
'Praxiteles,' said he, L s'pose you
know them 'taters is to be planted to-
day. guess we'd better get at EN-
II knew it we'll enough, but l had
just dug lot of worms and had every
thing ready to go down to the creek
and try for trout. So l said:
eyes, father. But the trout are
biting. tremendous, SO they say
lis that SOP said father. We'll, my
son, spose, then, you've been digging
fshworms?'
"'Yes, father said 1, feeling good,
for father was an indulgent parent.
"'And got your pole and line all
AGED ready, too. s'pose" said he.