davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
ooNso1,Ar1oN IN LIEU OF CASE.

A gentleman in Santa Rosa has a
grown son at school in Oakland who
spends more than his monthly allow
ance. His last letter to his father is
"corker." 1t is as follows:
''Dear Papa: 1 have to ask you for
a few dollars and I don't know how to
express myself. Ifyou could see how
I blush with embarrassment you would
give me $40 without me telling you.
81 send you this by -, who is
visiting Santa Rosa over Sunday. He
will wait for an answer. Your affec.
tionate Son.
"P. g.: Overcome with shame for
what I have written, I have been run.
ing after the messenger to take the
letter from him, but I cannot catch
up with him. hope my letter will he
lost"
His father was naturally touched,
but was equal to the emergency. He
replied as follows:
"My Dear Son: Console yourself
and blush no longer. The messenger
lost yo9r letter. Your afectionate
Father. Santa Rosa Democrat.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

s'You had too much PRIDE" She
was smiling now.
''But why have you come here
again?"
"You never wrote to me, Brandon
and I thought L"
"You feared I should do what you
knew I would not. That's like a
woman!" and he laughed lightly.
'tBut it's all over now, Minnie. 1
have completed my book and sold it
to the Irvines for $1,000. The an
nouncement of your engagement
kicked my pride SO hard that I had TO
do something desperate.
Minnie was splendid actress.
"What?" crauing forward, with one
hand on her lovers shoulder; $1,000!
You darling" and she kissed him
eagerly.
eyes, and there's more to follow.
They are certain 1t will be success,
and they claim the refusal of all my
other works. God bless you, Minnie.
But for you-you've got to share this
with mel"
He threw the gold and notes upon
the table, but the girl shrank back.
"No, no, Brandon, your brains
earned it; it is all yours. Yesl We
will share it, and all that is to come.
No refusal; you proposed it,"
They were married within month,
but "A Fin-de Steele Fool" was not q
success. Indeed, it WAS an utter fail
ure; and one paper remarked that
Messrs. Irvine &c Irvine had better
close up if that was the best rubbish
they could secure.
How Minnie laughed at the great
unknown scribe who penned these
lines! Like Brandon, he never knew
that Minnie Horton was the real pub
Usher of the volume; that she paid
Brandon the $1,000, and that she pub
lished oil his following effusions.
Brandon works merrily on, writes
four hours each day, and sells each
book as soon as 1t is finished. Strange
to relate, many of his works are out of
print. Though paid for, they have
never been published. Occasionally he
determines to trot arounl to Irvine's
and inquire what they mean by such
scandalous conduct; but when this fit
seizes him, Minnie always has some
thing for him to do, and he always
does it.-Boston Traveller.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
A Queer Trade.

A queer trade is followed by half
dozen sidewalk merchants outside the
Philadelphia House OF Correction.
Every person discharged from the in
stitution receives on leaving new
pair of shoes. Traders lie in wait for
them discharged prisoners aud offer
the q pair of old and comfortable
shoes and twenty-five or fifty cents for
their new pair. In great majority
of cases the trade is made, The Houst
of Correction shoes are we'll made and
strong, and the traders get n good
price for them from wurk,ngmen. -
Nsw Yurk Sun,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
A HARD DAYS WORK.

sI almost feel tired" said the new
woman, as she laid her beaver aside
and gave orders for the proper sta
bling of her bicycle.
VI thought you men never got
tired" groaned her husband, as he
made the last stitch in the embroid-
cry of handkerchief.
"Rarely," replied the new woman,
"but to-day made the speech that
killed the bill for the emancipation of
husbands, and raised the roof of the
capitol with piece of my mind; and
if that isn't enough to tire an ordi-
nary mortal, I'd like to know what
is? Three Jumps OF sugar in mine,
hnl"-Chicago Times-Herald.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
500 Reward. 500.

The readers of this paper will be pleased to
Iearn that there is a least one dreaded disease
that science has been able to cure In all it
stages, aud that is Catarrh. Has Catarrh
me- ,ical fraternity. Catarrh being consti;
tutional disease. requires a constitutions
treatment. Halls Catarrh Cnrs is taken Int r
nall acting dir, city upon the blood and mu-
cous surfaces of the system, ther by troy
the the patient strength by building up the on
stitrtion and assisting. nature In doing its
work. The proprietors have so much faith H.
its curative powers, that th"y offer One Hun
dred Dol ars for any case that 1t taiIs 10 cure
F. ]. CHENEY & Co., Toledo, o.
e@-SoId nv Druggists, G5'.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
Nearly as Bad.

"Brother Wilgus," said the deacon,
"there is q report current that you
were run out of Plunkville by White
Caps FIVE years ago." -.
'sIt was not quite that bad, =" said
the minister, with slight smile; "it
was only a threatened donation party"
Journal.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
An Atlanta Banker has Words of Praise
for n Home Institution.

Mr.. Cha<. E. Currier, Of the. Atlanta Ma
tional Bank, Is very caraful with his wor 8,
not only in financierng, but In his conver-a
tion generally. Like the rest Of us, he Is ST.
sometimes; but, unlike many OF us, he knows
how 10 get We !.
ii have used Tyner's Dyspepsia, Remedy II
attacks Of acute indigest on, and have aIwnyr
found 1t to give instantaneous relief. l con-
alder il a medicine OF high merit" :,
Price per bottle, 30 cents. For sale by oil
druppists,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
LOVE AND FATE.
Ever the moonlight under

Ever the moonlight under
Will men and rmatdens dream;
Ever the same sweet wonder
OF gliding down Loves stream.
And yet this lessons given
We learn it again and again:
Kiss and the world is heaven,
Part and the world is pain.
Who knoweth. while sailing onward,
Where swirling whirlpools wait?
Love looketh alone to sunward,
And giveth no thought to hate.
And yet this lesson given
We learn it all by and by:
The wrack may darken the even,
And laughter end in sigh!
will T. Hale.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
Sorry Not to oblige.

Poole, the tailor, was most accom-
modating gentleman, and was often
invited to the houses of 'sthe great. J"
When staying with certain noble
man, he was asked, one morning, by
his host, what he thought of the party
who had assembled at. table the night
before. ''Why, very pleasant, indeed,
your grace; but perhaps little mix
ed" 'sITang it all, Poole!" responded
the jovial peer; ST couldn't have all
tailorsI'-
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
Cable from New York to Hayti.

CaUI9 IrUIK NOW TUT M 10
The United States and Hayti Gable
company has chartered the cable
steamer Mackay Bennett, owned by
the Commercial Cable company, for
the purpose of laying the first section
of submarine cable to connect New
York direct with Hayti, West Indies.
The cable terminates near the landing
place of the Commercial company's
cable at Coney Island and will be COM
pleted as soon as possible to Hayti.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
Even Then.

Adam stood at the gate of Eden,
looking out steadily at the new world.
"Why don't you hurry up2" he
shouted. "I can't for the life of me
see why woman never is ready in
time. What the-serpent-is keeping
you2"
T-I can't get these fig leaves
pinned straight" was the reply of Eve
in voice that warned him to carry
the discussion no further.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
FAULTY PIECE OF NEWS,

FAULTY PIECE OF NEWS.
"Aw, they say, don't ye know, that
Cholly Caperway has bwain trouble" f"
"Too bad, bah Gawge. Why don't
they do something's"
''They cawn't locate it, ye know"
"Bsh iove, don't ye know, I weally
forgot to awsk which. Mail and Ex-
press.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
K.s, your weatber Eve opep,

Fraud loves q shining mark. Occasionally
spurious limitations spring up of Hostetter's
Stomach Bitters, the great American family
remedy for chill- and fever, dyspepsia, con-
situation, biliousness, nervousness, neuralaia,
rheumatism an! kidney disorder. These
limitations are usually fiery local bitters full
of high wines. Look out for the firm signature
on toe genuine label and vignette Of st. George
and the Dragon.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

PARTICULAR care should be given
chrysanthemums coming into flower.
Keep them we'll supported and the TO-
liage clean. Give liquid manure twice
a week at least.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

Needs assistance it may be best to render it
promptly. but one should remember to use even
the most perfect remedies only when needed
The best and most simple and gentle remedy is
the Syrup of Figs manufactured by the Cali
fornia Fig Syrup Co.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
All Broke at Once.

$50 you took your family to the sea-
shore?" said the facetious man.
''I did," twas the melancholy reply.
"Where there is such grandeur in
the breaking of the waves"
eyes"
"And the breaking of the engage
ments-"
"Yes, and of the 500 bill. Wash
ington Star.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
n1ARp1Na AGAINsr FIXTURE MISTAKES.

GUARDING AGAINST FUTURE MISTAKES.
Boston Young Lady-I want to
look ct pair of eyeglasses, sir, of
extra magnifying power.
Dealer-"Yes, ma'am; something
very strong?"
Boston Young Lady-''Yes, sir.
While visiting in the country last
summer 1 made very painful blum!
der, Which I never want to repeat. :"
Dealer-"May I ask what that-er
-blunder was?"
Boston Young Lady-"oh, yes. I
mistook humble bee for black
berry. "-Com1c Weekly.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
A CONTINUED STORY.

A CONTINUED STORY.
Mrs. Brown-"My husband tore
the last page out of the book was
reading. But I'll pay him back in
his own coln."
Mrs. Cobwigger-':But how, my
dear?"
Mrs. Prown-"He'll never hear the
end of it. Comic Weekly.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
Hoods Pills 7s sEs 'asif'sS S 5sussss. Ils; sss e.
The Greatest rledical Discovery
of the Age.
KENMEDY'S
Medical Discovery.
DONALD KENNEDY, OF RoxBuay, HAss.,

Has discovered In one OF our common
pasture weeds remedy that cures every
kind Of Humor, from the worst Scrofula
down to q common pimple.
He has tried it in over eleven hundred
cases, and never failed except in two cases
(both thunder humor). he has now In
his possession over two hundred eertia-
Gates Of its value, all within twenty milss
of Boston. Send postal card for book.
A benefit is always experienced from the
nrst bottle, and perfect cure is warranted
when the right quantity is taken.
Whom the lungs are affected it causes
shooting pains, Ike needles passing
through them; the same with the Liver
or Bowels. This is caused by the ducts
being stopped, and always disappears In .
week after taking it. Read the label.
II the stomach is foul or bilious 1t WIN
cause squeamish feelings at first
No change Of dier ever necessary. Eat
tho best you can get, and enough OF It
Dose, one tablespoonful in water at bed
time. Sold by all Druggists
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
HIS TERRIBLE EXPERIENCE.

HIS TEhhlbLE hAfGhlENoE'
At The lakes:
"Redsoak, let's go in bathing"
"Not for worlds.
"Why, what's the matter?"
sLast time I was in I swallowed
some water!"
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
THE OLD. OLD oUEsT1o

THE OLD. OLD QUESTION.
''Do you believe in prayer"
"WhY, yes; I suppose I do, after q
fashion"
"Well, 1 don't. Here I've been
praying for my daily bread, with the
other things, and yet"
"Old man, Heaven helps those that
help themselves. Why don't you get
to work and do something to help
yourself?"
"ByJove, I Wilt I'll go look for
wife with money right away"
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

Mrs. winslow's Soothing Syrup for children
trethine, softens the gums. reduces infamma-
fion. allays pain, cures wind collie. 25c. bottl-
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

have found Piso's Cure for con:sgmption
an unfailing medicine.-F. r: LoTS, 1000 Scott
% Crnvinvton. KY, Oct, ], 1894.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

constipatiouis to prolong Hte ,Rpans Tab.
constiration. One tabule gives relief.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

Dr.. Kimer's SWAMP Roof cures
all Kidney and Bladder troubles.
Pamphlet and Consultation free.
Laboratory Ringhamton, n. Y.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

FITS stopped free by DR, KtINE's GREAT
NERVE RrsToRER. No Ats after first DAYS u-e.
Marvellous cures. Treatise and s.. 90 trial bot
lie free. DR.. Kline. 9S1 Arch ST., Phila.. Pa.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

I sSsss s',s iSFS syss ss n sis ftsSa S
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
N IoNDoN's FOG.

Driver of BUS Ito conductor whom
he called up)-"Jim, TIL OIL gent be-
hind s just fell hoff."
Conductor-"All right, Bill. 'E's
paid is fare. ."-Tlt-Bits.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
OUT OF SIGHT.

Jobson-"Why did you discharge
your new bookkeeper?"
Merchant-"Had to. He was so
nearsighted that every time he wrote
o line with his pen he rubbed it out
with his nose"
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

A fool who has a flash of wit creates aston
ishment and scandal.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

Take Parker's Ginger Tonic Homo With
YOU. It will exceed your expectations in abat
ing colds, and many ills and aches.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SKETCHES FROM
VARIOUS SOURCES.
Wasted-Out of Sight-In London's
Fog-His Terrible Experience
Faulty Piece ofNews-A
Continued Story, Etc.

ssKind sir, this encyclopaedia
Is full" said he. "ofknowledge."
The youth with scorn regarded him..
Quoth he: ''I'm just from college"
Puck.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

Wyoming was at the last census
xurth Sl3,82l, 1919.
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
MINNIE'S STRATAGEM.

CLOUD,
author, sat on the
edge of his bed
and gazed in dis
NAL despair OF the
upturned sole of
his boot.
On the table
lay an almost
completed novel,
whose progress
had received q
dual check. First
ly the supply of
paper had become
exhausted, which,
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23
When Nature

True friends visit us in prosperity only whel
;pvite6
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

Pain is Not Conducive of Pleasure,
especially when occasioned by corns. Hinder
corns viii please; it removes them perfectly
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

Reason cannot show itself more reasonable
than to cease reasoning on things unreasonable
Edgefield advertiser. [volume] (Edgefield, S.C.) 1836-current, 1895-10-23

secondly, allowed the author time to
think of the woman he loved; and this
always made him SO utterly miserable
that ne could not bring his thoughts
to bear upon anything but the ap-
parent hopelessness of the state of
The Washington times., 1895-05-11
WOMEN JOURNALISTS.

All Arfstocratic; But, Fortuna tely, All
ar1stocrats tre Not Journalists.
All journalists are aristocrats; but fortu-
nately for those havingla living to earn, all
aristocrats are not Journalists, says an ex-
change OF those who are, Lady Colin
Campbell and Lady Violet Greyille stand
first among the members of the weaker
sex. Lady Colin Campbell is now editing
the Realm, and she is a Constant contribu-
tor to several other papers Lady Violet is
also well known as writer OF periodical
literature. Her style is excellent. 1t is
light and versatile and re fined, and her
wide womanly sympathies and keen per-
ceptive powers add to- the charm of her
work
Some of the English princesses write
occasionally, although they only accept an
honorarium for charitable objects Prin-
cess Christian has done a great deal OF
journalistic work in her, time and ALWAYS
in a straightforward and sensible manner.
The Countess or Abe rdeen occasionally
writes on political and social subjects, and
the countesses of Jersey, Munster and Mar
all WELD the pen ably.
The Duchess OF Sutherland is a really
good shortstory writer and Lady Henry
Somerset is a weekly contributor to her
own paper, the Woman's Signal.
Lady Meath and the Countess of War
wick have occasionally written articles,
and among other titled ladies who have
taken up journalist work may be mentioned
Lady Jeune, the Hon. Emily Lawless,
Lady Lindsay, and in France the Duchess
d Uzes and the Countess de Martel
AS younger woman Lady Salisbury
did a great deal OF writing for various
papers and critical work for the Saturday
Review, while the Marchioness of CRANKY
provides Illustrations for certain favored
periodicals
The Washington times., 1895-05-11

are lightly touched with talcum powder
the nails pared and bleacbed, aud then a
swift, painless treatment of troublesome
| Germs, with sensitive joints; with instruction
TO apply salve where dancing has rubbed
a blister, or tight shoe broken the skin,
| and hot flaxseed pouitice for an iu-
| famed digit
The hairdresser comes along after little
| and in another alcove, without more injury
| 10 one & toilet than removal or ones hat,
inaugurates an exhilerating shampoo. A
Dig bib or waterproof flannel, a few towels
and lap cloth, are ample protection to
ones dress, while the hair is let down
combed out, and then, beuding over a por-
celain basin, through a spray tube the hot,
soapy water runs over the scalp, followed
by the attendants agile fingers. It's
matter OF three minutes before the electric
fan is turned on the clean, damp, sweet
smelling locks, and in fifteen minutes more
the hair is dry and ready for an application
OF brilliantine that restores the oil to
scalp and strans. In half an hour the hat
can be pinned on smoothly piled locks, with
no danger OF sneezing after the thorough
baptism.
There is yet another process that is fol-
lowed by women who desire facial treat
nlent for wrinkles or pallor or bemishing
moles, moth patches or the disfiguring
blackheads that in the dusty city settle
into the closest woven skins Here with
steain or electricity the most wonderful
results are accomplished A half hour is
spent hanging over a cloud of steam, while
firm fingered attendant smoothes and
pinches, washes and brushes, polishes and
donches the offending features till they
glow with color and cleanliness.
Or massage is given dry with gentle
streams of electricity coursing down from
brow 10 chin, and the customer, at the end
of a toilet that has lasted two hours, saIlies
forth once more into the world feeling as
though born again clean, whole and new.
Now SO heartily do women advocate and
benefit by this species of treatment for good
looks that those who can afford it make
regular round of the toilet parIor by ap.
pointment on certain hours and days
They have their own lockers in the big
dressing room, where they keep a flannel
orwfite Turkish bathrobes, apair ofslippeTs,
and a complete set OF toilet impIe-
ments for manicure and pedicure, hair
dresser and masseuse. Numbers of them
who believe in the truth of a pound of pre-
yenilon bring their schoolgirl daughters,
too, for here the hairdresser will treat q
scant suit for richer growth, encourage
their eyebrows to take q deeper, clearer
line, keep a girls feet from corns, cure
her of biting her nails and lips and tone
up complexion that threatens to grow
coarse or thick. The presiding geniuses
of these colleges of beauty are always
women, who, by their successful expert
mentS, have proven that this is a profitable
business for members of their sex since
there Is nothing one woman Will more
gladly purchase from another than a recipe
for improving or retaining her looks
a. a. AUSTIN.
The Washington times., 1895-05-11
DIED.

COSTELLO-OsT Thursday May 9, 1895,
at 5:45 p. m, Maggie, infant daughter OF
John and Hannah Costello, nee Downey,
aged eleven months and nine days.
Funeral from parents TesIdence, 532
Eighth street southeast, to-day at 2-30
O'Clock. Relatives and friends respectively
invited to attend.
CHAP PMAN-On Thursday, May 8, 1895,
al : y. N, Cora, youngest daughter OF ".
H.. jr., and Minnie E. Chapman, aged
seventeen months.
Funeral from parents residence, 75O
Seventh street, southeast, to-day. May
IL, at p. IN.
MANGAN-Departed this life on Friday,
May 10, 1895, at s a. m. Ellen, the eldest
daughter OF Maurice and the late Margaret
Mangan, nee Wren, ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS.
Funeral will take place from her parents
residence, 364 G. street southwest Monday.
May Is, at 8 80 O'Clock a. m, thence to st.
Dominic S Church. where high II quieIu mass
viii be said for the Tepose other soul. Rel
atiyes and friends are respectively Invited
to attend
NYMAN-At Chevy Chase, Md, Friday,
May 10, 1895, at 1910 a. m, William
Miller Nyman, in the forty ninth year OF
his age
Funeral services at the residence OF his
brother, Mr. Howard s. Nyman, Chevy
Chase, Nd, to-day at p m Interment at
Boonsboro, Md, Sunday.
SIGMUNf-0n Thursday, May o, 1895,
at S,10 O'Clock, at her residence, 1912
Prospect aveGue, Ann NJ, widow of the late
Christian Sigmund, in the eighty second
year of her age.
Funeral from Oak Hill Chapel to-day at
1:30 o'clock
sMITH-Anna Y. Smith, the beloved
daughter of William A and Clara Smith,
aged seventeen years, departed this life
May 8, 1895, at her residence, 1913
Tenth street north west.
Funeral services at Vermont Avenue
Baptist Church to-day at 2 O'Clock. Friends
and relatives are invited.
SMITH-On Thursday, May 9, 1895, at
1920 a. m. Miss Sue v Smith.
Funeral services at the residence OF her
sister, Mrs Henry English, 500 H street
northwest, Saturday, May IL. at 10 a. "a.
Interment strictly private.
TAIGBERT-On May 9, 1895, at a. m,
Katbryne E., beloved daughter of Tobias
and Malissa Talbert, aged one year aud
four months.
Funeral from parents residence, 1921
Maryland avenue northeast, to-day at d.
M Interment Rock Greek.