Birmingham age-herald., 1895-05-26

was reWafueu WlIn az DlH LOT HIS Sci- vices, and his blessings were many and fervent when he found that the bill was genuine. The bride was dressed in long bridal veil and pair of gold-rimn1ed eyeglasses. She looked very charming in the mellow light of the tallow candles. Ed had on a Prince William duster. bor- rowed from his brother, and a full dress white shirt loaned him by the accommo> dating merchant, MT. Fulton Measureby, who very generously stayed away from the wedding in order to do so. As the expectant couple moved in the grand march to the tune of "Old Dan Tucker, they presented a conspicuous appear ance. There were many nice gifts from admiring friends, among them coming 2-year-old heifer, string of glass beads and a half dozen plated nut picks. We should not omit to say that old lady Openmouth looked very comedy and pleasant in a new white apron with red strings. The old man had on his cus- tomary jag The young couple leave for Snortyille tomorrow where they will spend their honeymoon, remaining there two days, after which they will return t1 Bungtown and take up their residence with the groom's parents.
 There is a new family in town Mr and Mrs. Rodly. They hail from In- diana. We were acquainted with Mrs Isodly a good many years ago, before she became a Mrs. In fact, we once pro' posed to her. We remember to this day the impassioned appeal we made at the time. We told her that life would be even as an empty whisky barrel, devoid of all charm, if she refused to share our lot in life. She refused and married MT. Rodly, who was in the lightning rod business at that time She is now the mother of twelve children, and. as will be seen by look at our advertising col umns, takes in washing. Rodly also takes in washing to the amount of sev- eral quarts per day.
 In speaking of the approaching elec- tion Hank Bray remarked that the citi- zens of Bungtown kcenly appreciated the similarity of the words, "Whiskers' and whisky" and there could be no doubt about the result.
 Mayor Lushton had some ribbon badges printed over in Snortyille last week. He wanted them to read, "I Am a Lushtonite." Strange to say, his fol- lowers refuse to wear them, though more appropriate badge could not be designed.
 A bewildered-l looking stranger entered the Cyclone office Friday morning, ani, sitting on a stack of family Bibles, un- burdened himself as follows:
 Mister Editor I am in the hardest kind uv hard luck. Yesterday mornin' l was a-ridn' along the narrer trail on the east side uv Devils mountain, an l was happy. The blue sky was above me, light heart inside uv me, an whut l thought was a trusty nag trudged along beneath me I was thinking what howlin' old time I'd have when I got to Bungtown. I sez to myself, I'll sub scribe to the Cyclone, then I'll take that old editor out and whoop things up till thar won't be a sober man in the whole town. While l was goin' on easy-like, meditating on these things, all uv a sudden that durned old nag O mine mist its footin an over the precipice we both went. Then it wus a question which would hit the ground fust an win the 300-yard dash Gee whiz I never see hoss make sech time! She jest throwed her ears back, stretched out her weather beaten tail and paved the air at a :02 gait. Every little while she'd look back to see if l were a-gainin' any, an when I'd get purity close up on her. she'd make an extra spurt an leave me couple of lengths behind. Holy Meraculousi l were traveln'! Never had any idea I could smash reckerds before. Oh, but it were excitin! The purtiest race I ever seen. We'll, old Nancy beat me by a neck but the excitement were too much for her, and she died uv heart failure before she had time to collect the gate money. I hated to lose a hoss like she were, but that wasn't my wus luck. While feeling around to see if was all right missed my pocketbook, and look ing up along the race course l could see 1t hanging in the air. It had slipped out of my pocket when I were about half way down, and I'll be durn fuzzled if it didn't stay there. Yes, sir there it were just as nice as you please, $500 of my money 400 feet up in the air and no way to git it. Now. MT. Edtor if you'll lend me balloon so's I can go and get my dough, I'll take the Cyclone for three months and pay in advance. If you don't happen to have an air-ship of any kind handy you might let. me have a quarter, and I'll go get something to brace up on."
 He was evidently an old newspaper man, so we gave him the sum and he went on his way rejoicing.
 Washington, D. C., May 25, 1S95.-(Spe- cial Correspondent of the Cyclone)--I arrived here yesterday and found that congress had adjourned and Pennsyl- vania avenue is very wide. It Is also hot though I am informed that there was snow here few years ago. I saw the president this morning. He was walking along N. w. G. street, with large trees on each side of him. I had quite a long conversation with him about the weather, the silver question and gen. eral mutabilty. He said he would not accept a third term if the people didn't want him to have it, and wishes the Cy- clone sent to him. He only had 50 cents with him, but says to send the paper for a year, and he will either remit the balance or make you postmaster of Bungtown. He wishes you success in the mayoralty contest, and remarked that he never took much stock in Lush- ton, the present incumbent. He was in- terrupted here by a little negro boy in blue cap and brass buttons who told the president some one wanted him at his private telephone. So shaking hands with me he hurried off in the direction of the White House.