Yorkville enquirer. [volume] (Yorkville, S.C.) 1855-2006, 1895-06-12
atlisttllansous &sadins.
SHE WAS CRITICAL.
A Hemlock Belt Lady on Her Way to Susan
Ann Pettibone's.

one day and was approaching a rather
neat looking house in small clearing
at the side of the road, when a woman
came running out of the house toward
the road, waving a blue, baggy um-
brella, tied with a white string. She
carried in her other hand an old fash
ioned carpetbag of red and yellow
pattern. She waved the umbrella as if
I were an approaching train that she
was signaling against danger ahead.
I stopped at the signal. The woman
was sharp featured and elderly.
"Be We goin ez fur ez the Drop ?"
she asked.
said was.
"No furder ?" she inquired.
That was as far as l was going.
"Couldn't we make it. handy to squirt
on couple O. miled furder to my dar
ter Susan Ann Pettibone's?" the wo-
man asked.
I said I was sorry, but I couldn't 60
any farther than Heflin's Drop that
day.
"That's kind O. tryin," my interrog-
ator said, looking disappointed. "But
I s'pose 1 kin walk them two miled,
though hadn't orter be ast to at my
time O. life. Well, never mind. Jist
cramp your wheel, sonny, an I'll git
in an jog with we ez fur ez the Drop.
Two miled furder, though, wouldn't
be much of a squirt fer your boss, an
the two miled back to the Drop would
not hurt him. guess ye kin stick this
here carpetbag right in front o. ye,
there. Be keerful on it, though, fer
tha's can O. p'served peaches, and
can o. termatuses, an can O. p'eserved
ounces in that air bag ez I'm takin' to
my darter, Susan Ann Pettibone, and
if they get broke I'll hef to asst ye to
pay fer 'em. Jist hold my umb'rel
while I climb inter your wagon, sonny.
"There! guess I'm in, but amt
sure. I never see setch an onhandy
wagon to get inter! It's enough to
stretch the hind legs of kangaroo to
climb inter it! Hope didn't git no
tar on this bombazine dress O. mine!
Seems to me jist ez if did! Don't see
none, though. Now, sonny, jist put
your legs over that carpetbag SOS it
won't fall outen this onhandy wagon
O. your'n. It's onhandy to climb inter,
but seems to me ez if it was the hand
lest kind of wagon fer carpetbag
to fall out Of Butdon't squeeze down
on the bag, fer mebbe ye mowt break
some O. them cans O. p'eserves that's
in it, an I'd hefto asst ye to pay fer 'em.
Now guess I'm all fixed, sonny, an
We kin drive ahead. I'd be obleegd if
ye'd kind O. squirt your hoss leetle,
too, cause I'm on pins and needles to
git to my darter Susan Ann Pettibone's
an can't hardly wait. I better take
that umb'rel, guess. I'm afeerd ye
mowt let it fall outen the wagon. I've
had that umb'rel more'n 80 year an
set a powerful store by it. There,
git ap, now, sonny"
All this hadn't taken up more than
IS seconds of time; but it was long
enough for this remarkable woman to
practically gain possession Of me and
my wagon, for all the time she was
talking she was acting, and when she
told me that 1 might "git ap," 1 found
myself squeezed into one corner of the
buggy seat, with my legs thrown over
the big carpetbag, and the owner of
the bag and umbrella occupying the
rest of the establishment. But Hef-
Inns Drop was only FIVE miles farther
on, and 1 "spurted" my horse so that
I might get the agony over as soon as
possible. We hadn't gone more than
= quarter of q mile, when my passen-
ger turned her sharp face suddenly
toward me and looked me over suspic-
iously. At last she said:
"Lightnin rods ?"
She evidently noticed that I was
puzzled for she supplemented her
question with this one:
81 mean be we peddlin of'em? ?"
"Oh, no! !" I replied.
"Sure ?" she said, eying me dubi-
ously.
said I was quite sure.
swell, mebbe ye aint," she said,
shaking her head, "but you'm jist the
same size and build of u feller that
nosed around through here last year,
putting up lightning rods, and his re-
ceipts fer the money come back ez
Judgment notes that'd take shirt often
mans back Jist the same size Oh
build e'zackly, but mebbe ye amt him,
I'm s'pectin to see this hoss O. yourn
balk ev'ry minute! If he does, I'll
hef to dilIydally, and my darter Susan
Ann Pettibone'll be powerful worried {!
don't see why folks can't drive hoss-
es that don't act jist ez if they was
going to balk ev'ry minute ! Patent
hay forks? ?"
I said no. Not patent hayforks.
"Rakes?"
"No," said l.
"Young man." she said, "you don't
want to set here and tell me you're
tax collectin ?"
I said I didn't want to do anything
of the sort, because I wasn't tax-col-
lecting. This remarkable woman re-
mained quiet for a few minutes and
then turned on me again.
II dunno whether to congratulate We