The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1895-07-17
NY FINANCIAL CAREER.
The One Experience OF a Man Who Wanted
to Open an Account.

! Inc clerks rattle me; the wicSetS rattle
me; the sight OF the money rattles me; cy-
srything rattlcs me.
The moment I cross the threshold Of q
bank 1 am hesitating jay. If / attempt
to transact business there L become an ir-
| responsible idiot.
| L knew this beforehand, but my salary
| had been raised To $50 month, and felt
shat the bank was the only place for it.
30 1 shambled in and looked timidly
round at the clerks. I had an idea that n
| person about - open an account must
needs consult the manager.
! went up 20 - wicket marked Account
! ant" The accountant was q tall, cool
devil The very sight OF him ratified me.
| Ny voice was scpulchral.
"Can I see the manager?" I said, and
| added solennly, alone I don't know
why I said alone
Certainly - said the accountant and
| fetched him.
The manager was grave, calm man. I
held my $50 clutchcd in acrumpled ball in
my pocket.
''Are you the Inanagcr:'' I said. God
knows I didn't doubt it.
Yes, " he said
Can I see you, ;" I asked, "alone?" 1
didn't want to say alone again, but
without it the thing seemed self evident.
The manager looked at me. in some
| alarm. He felt that had an awful secret
| 10 reveal.
Come i'm here, he said and led the
way to a private room. He turned the key
in the lock.
I'VE are safe from interruption here, -
! he said. Sit down"
We both sat down and looked ut one an
! other. I found no voice 10 speak.
You are one OF PinkertOn's men, 1 pre-
sumo, " be slid
He had gathered from my mysterious
manner that 1 was a detective. L knew
what he was thinking and it made me
worse.
No, not from Pinkcrton's," 1 said,
seemingly 70 imply that I came from
rival agency.
TO tell the truth, " 1 went on as if 1
had been prompted to lie about il, Il am
not detective mt all. I have come to open
an account. ! intend to keep all my money
in this bank
The manager looked relieved, but still
serious. He concluded now that l was a
son of Baron Rothschild or young Gould.
A large account, suppose, - he said.
Fairly large, - 1 whispered. Il propose
20 deposit $50 now and $50 month rcgu-
larly''
The manager got up and opened the
door He called TO the accountant.
Mr.. Montgomery he said unkindly
loud this gentleman is opening an ac-
count He will deposit $50. Good morn
ing"
rose.
y big iron door stood open at the side of
the room.
Good morning" 1 said and stepped
into the safe.
Come out, said the manager coldly
and showed me the other way.
went up TO the accountants wicket
and pokcd the ball of money at him with
quick, conYulsive movement as if I were
doing a conjuring trick.
My face was CHASTITY pale
Here said, deposit it, The tono
of the words seemed TO mean, Let us do
this painful thing while the fit is on US"
He took the money and gave it to an
other clerk. He made me write the sum
on slip and sign my name in book. 1
no longer knew what / was doing. The
bank swan before my eyes.
is it deposited 1 asked in hollow,
vibrating voice.
lit Is, - said the accountant.
Then want to draw Il check"
My idea was to draw ont So of it for
present use. Some one gave me a check
book through n wicket. and some one else
began telling me how TO write it out. The
people in the bank had the impression that
L was an invalid millionaire. 1 wrote
the clerk. He looked at it,
What. are YOU drawing it all out
again:" ne asked in surprise Then real
lied that I had written 56 instead of s. l !
was too far gone to reason now. / had a |
feeling that il was impossible to explain |
the thing All the clerks had stopped writ |
ing to lock at ire.
Reckless with misery. L made plunge |
Yes. the whole thing
=.
bank:'
Every cent Of it,
Are you not going 10 deposit any |
more" said the clerk, astonished.
Never"
An idiot hope struck me that they might |
think something had inSultcd me while 1 |
was writing the check, and that 1 had |
changed my mind. L made "A wrctched at
tempt To look like man with fearfully |
quick temper.
The clerk prepared to pay the money.
How will you have IL" he said.
WHAT
How will you have it,
''Oh." L caught his meaning and an
swered, without even trying TO think, In
ffties'
He gave me a $50 bill
And the six:' he asked dryly.
I'm skies, - / said.
He gave il me- and l rushed out.
As the big doors swung behind Inc /
caught the echo of roar of laughter that
went up 10 the ceiling of the bank. Since
then l bank no more. I keep my money
in cash in my trousers pocket and my saw
ings in silver dollars in a sock.-Stephen
Leacock in Life.
Reckless Exposure.
4 don't wish to boast. " said the finan-
cial editor. but I've got the cleanest desk
in the room
This is the first time you've cleaned it