The free press., 1895-12-19
EXCHANGE FL ASHES.

are sad, and laughs with you when
you are glad, and swears with you
when you are mad :? The editor.
Who has to be both kind and wise,
and never (hardly ever) lies, and
when he does, creates surprise +?
The editor. Who owns heart as
well as cheek, Is possessed of a
spirit proud but meek, and lives
on 40 cents week ? The editor.
Hamilton |Va.) Enterprise.
Money used to be made from the
skins of animals. Some of it is
made nowadays by SHINING hus
man beings -Democrat-S.ar.
G. W. Truitt, of Georgia, raised
fifteen bales of cotton from five
acres of land, and broke the worlds
record by gathering one hundred
bales of cotton with the labor of
only two mules.-Biloxi Banner.
SCANDAL.
The scandal monger is a person
to be heartily despised by all class.
es, and the person who repeats a
scandal is even worse than thief
or murderer.-Rev. DR.. Ferry,
Methodist, Winnipeg, Manitoba.
WILL SHE?
When the coming woman gets here
Will she offer up her seat
Will she offer her umbrella
When there's rain or STOW or sleet7
Will she help US in the wagon
Will she bate our fishing hook2
Will she step into the water
That We dry may cross the brook 7
Will she seize rail and rescue
When the bully chases us?
Will she push the wheezy mower
Every eve and make no fuss !?
Will she run the locomotive.
Shovel coal and handle brakes ?
Will she level mount and forest,
Garry bitters for the snakes?
Will she march 20 bloody battle,
Snap her fingers at the hurts?
Well, I guess not she will merely
Hide behind her husbands skirts.
Chicago Home Blade.
The New Woman-the plain truth
must be told-ls simply a feeble
and pathetic imitation Of a man,
with bis faults more conspicuous in
the copy than his force and his
strength.-COmpercial Appeal.
The press of the state ia having
a good deal to say about the pros
hibition law. If there is such a
law, or rather the enforcement it
must be in some country not yet
discovered by man. The prohi-
bition law in this state ia not only
farce so far az the law is con-
cerned, but it is doing more injury
than all the open saloons hereto-
fore IN force. Prohibition is one
thing and prohibition law not en-.
forced is entirely a different one. -
Newton County Progress.
Zone is never too old to learn"
is decidedly proven when we are
informed that Martin Van Buren,
Stevens, at the age of 70 years, is
now student at the University of
Kansas and will graduate next
spring and take up the practice Of
law.-Charleston Herald.
The Democratic party has been
pronounced dead 80 uften-and al
ways comes up as clipper as ever
again-that there is left no ground
for doubt that it is immortal
Washington G. H. (Ohio) Register
Dem ocrat.
Bro. Walker, editor of the Will
iamsburg Waterman, is sockless.
He says if he can borrow pair he
will hang them ap Christmas. His
delinquent subscribers are treating
that poor editor shamefully. and
we are certain they viii. get what
they deserve--a hot place when
they leave this world.-Democrat-
Star.
Eighteen hundred and ninety-six
will be no more than auy other year
do you say9 Hadn't you better
think over it? Perhaps past years
haven't been much to you, but was
the fault in the years, or In you 7
Some man or woman who reads
this item, perhaps ffippanlly, will
end this life in 1896. Oh, yes, this
year may mean very much to you.
But brother, there Is more in living
through it right, than in dying out
of 1t wrong. Living and dying.
may 1t be to you all that God in.
| tepded.-Word e, Works.