davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
A Georgia Bat Story.

Two wandering bats strayed into
The iSmithUitle NeaOs office Thursday
night. They were very annoying. SO
we concluded to annihilate them. The
editor armed himself with q broom, the
devil got a long fishing-pole. and for
two hours they made the air hot. but
didn't get bat. Finally, when they
had given it up as bad job. Ed SMELL
grove came in and said he was the best
bat-killer in town. The first flourish
he made sent him stumbling over the
stove; at the second he nearly knocked
his head off against the old hand-press;
the tn I'd lick he made "pied'' three col
umns and a half of solid BREWER type,
and sent him to the ground, where he
struck his head against box of old
metal furniture and nearly broke his
neck. This time he put the broom
down. remarking that 'they were not
the kind of bats he was used to-" So
we picked up what was left of him and
had him taken home on stretcher.
He had forgotten how to bat. -Lee
County NeUS.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
Completely ParaIyzed.
PHYSICIANS ARE ASTOUNDED
BY A PECULIAR CASE.
A Young Man Stricken With Landry's
Paralysis and Yet Receivers.
From the Times, Philadelphia, Pa.

(From the Times, Philadelphia, Pa.)
Stricken with Landry's Paralysis and
set cured. That means but little to the
average layman but it means miracle
to physician. Such is the rare expert
ence of o. E. baltimore, of Madison,
N; J..
Paralysis" said Mr.. baltimore to a re-
porter, "or else the most celebrated
physicians of London were mistaken.
1T was on the 18th of March, this
year." he continued, when / was in
New York City, that l first felt the
symptoms of my trouble. l experienced
difficulty in going upstairs, my legs
failing to support me. / consulted
physician, who informed me that had
every symptom of Locomotor Ataxia,
but as the case developed he pro-
nounced it case of Landry's Paralysis
and knowing the nature of the disease,
advised me to start for my home and
friends. l gave up my work and on
April 1st started for London, Ont. A
well-known physician was consulted.
but l grew rapidly worse and on Satur-
day, April Z, several eminent physicians
held a consultation on my case and in
formed me that was at deaths door.
having but three to six days to live,
still fingered on by this time complete
ly paralyzed, my hands and feet being
dead, l could hardly whisper my wants
and could only swallow liquids, and
death would really have been a welcome
visitor.
Now comes the part that has as
founded the physicians. Rev. Mr..
GOndy, a clergyman who visited me in
my last hours, as he supposed, told me
of the marvellous cures of paralysis
that had been performed by DR.. Will
Jams Pink Pills for Pale People.
started to take the pills about April 2S
and week after that felt an improve
ment in my condition. There was a
warm, tingling sensation in the limbs
that had been entirely dead and / soon
began to move my feet and hands, the
improvement continued until May %,
when 1 was taken out of bed for drive
and drove the horse myself. By the
first of July l was able to walk
upstairs alone and paid a visit to Ma
CARA.
Slowly but surely / gained my old
health and strength leaving Ontario for
New York on Oct. IL and beginning
my work again on Oct. 26, 1894. Cured
of Landry's Paralysis in eight months"
To confirm his story beyond doubt Mr..
baltimore made affidavit
Sworn and subscribed before me Dec.
3, 1894 AMOS c. RATHBUN.
(Seal.) Notary Public.
DR.. Williams Pink Pills contain all
the elements necessary to give new life
and richness to the blood and restore
shattered nerves. They are for sale by
all druggists, or may be had by mail
from DR.. Williams Medicine Company,
Schenectady, N. Y, for so cents per box,
or six boxes for $3.50.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
The Old Reliab BILE.

The Hawkeye Insurance Company, of
Des Moines, has been doing business in the
state of Iowa for considerably over a quar-
ter of century. The people of Iowa have
known this company, and have had ample
tests of its fair and honorable manner of
doing business, and they know too of its
high standing among insurance institu-
tions. None are more reliable than this
old and substantial Iowa company.
Its first annual statement in 1866 showed
assets of S2S,6l7.14, which had increased in
January, 1895, to SI50.5Sl So, each year
showing an increase of assets over the pre-
ceding year.
lit insures property against fire, light
ming, high winds, cyclones, and tornadoes.
By prompt and fair adjustment and pay
ment of its losses it has secured the conf
dence of the public. Continuing as it does
under the wise and efficient management
of A. Howell, president, and w. ID. Skin
ner, secretary, and other officers of long
experience in the insurance business, IL
Will continue to maintain its enviable rep
utation as a safe and sound company, and
we can with confidence recommend all
those that have good property to insure to
patronize the Hawkeye Insurance Com
pany, and by getting policy in that COM
pany you will have the best.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
WITH THE WITS.

What makes you think they are so
madly in lover" He has been three
weeks trying to teach her to play
whist
Medical Examiner-Have there been
any symptoms of insanity in your fam
lily? Applicant for Insurance-Yes,
sir-or-that is, my sister once refused
man worth half million.
Bulkets-Don't you think your sister
will be awfully sorry to marry and
leave nice little boy like you? The
Pet-Yes. She said she'd "a got mar
ried dozen times over if it hand't
been for me.
At the Theater.-"Do you observe
that tenor who sings so admirably d?
He is as deaf as post" If he is deaf,
pray how does he know when he has
done singing?" THE conductor gives
him sign"
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
OCEAN ODDITIES.

The first author to attempt an ex-
PLANTATION of ocean currents was KEEP
Ter.
The sea cucumber is nothing but
thin skin and very capacious stom-
ach.
Sea water is said to contain all the
soluble substances that exist on the
earth.
The water OF the Dead sea yields
about two gallons of saline substances.
An echinodern that inhabits the
West Indian seas has over 10000 arms.
Naturalists are stin in doubt as to-
whether the sponge is a plant or an
animal.
The average depth of all oceans is
supposed to be between 1000 and 5000
fathoms.
There are springs of fresh water in
the Persian gulf that furnish supplies
to vessels.
Over 1000 varieties Of microscopic
seashells have been enumerated by
naturalists.
The saline matter held in solution
in sea water comprises one-thirtieth OF
its weight.
The sea nettlo stings its prey to
death by means of poison secreted in
its tentacles.
In cubic foot Of phosphorescent sea
water there have been found 25,600
living creatures.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

lie was leaning against the railing
at the ferry dock looking decidedly
out of sorts when along came an oily,
smooth-faced man and said:
"How are you OFF,
"What for?"
"Money."
Haven't got red"
''Say, can you tell lie?"
81 CANT
"Then you are the man want. Old
Capt. Smith, of Buffalo, is over in that
saloon and has got crowd around
him. He's great liar, but always
sticks to one anecdote. 1t is about
his vessel being wrecked, and of a
mermaid taking him in her arms and
swimming ashore. Now, then, want
you to go over and sit down and hear
just get up and claim that you are the
Identical mermaid who saved his USE
less old life. want to set him back,
and it will be fifty cents in your poe
ket."
The matter was arranged and the
pair went over to the saloon. Capt.
Smith was feeling good, and in little
time he worked around to remark:
THAT was curious thing that haS-
pened to me in 1S48. Did 1 ever tell
you of the wreck of the Mary Amp"
NO"
He sat down to describe the lmagin-
airy wreck, and when he got along to
where the vessel showed an intention
to founder the chap who was to play
mermaid got the wink and picked up
his ears.
"Well, SIR" continued Smith, "she
finally went down, and found myself
struggling in the lake. 1t was twenty
FIVE miles to land, and how do you
suppose / got there?"
Il have heard that mermaid lowed
you ashore" answered one of the
gang.
"Humph! an Internal lie! fioated
ashore on the mainhatch cover, and
never had a nicer ride in my life!'
The man who hired the liar seemed
completely broken down, while the
liar stumped off out doors with his
courage all gone. Smith had seen
them in conversation, suspected job,
and left the mermaid out altogether
Detroit Free Press.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
The Dinner Bell

Sounds but a n.ockery the dyspeptic. He
hears II, or course, but ms stomach does not
respond 10 the CALI He goes through the
motions ana suffers afterwards Tor the small
amount OF yIetuals ne partakes OF. Hosteuer'S
STOMACH Bltuers alters ms condition INTO one
OF aDlnty 10 eat pIenuIully, digest heartily,
ana asslmilate thoroughly. Ma4arla, rneuma.
tsm, constipation anu Dlliousness are con-
quered oy inns world-Iameu medicine.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
He Had Learned a Lesson.

Backwoodsman Gin Ohio town)-l
hear you've struck a well of natural
gas here lately.
Hotel Keeper-Yes. sir; got one in
our back yard.
ckwoodsman-I wish you'd tell
the clerk to turn it off when he shuts
up for the night. For heavens sake
warn him against blowing it out /
had nm experience once myself, mister
.--yaLdQe.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
CONSUMPTION kills

Consumption kills
more people than rifle
balls. II Is more dead
ly than any of the
much dreaded cpl
denies. II Is a steal
thy, gradual, slow
disease. II penetrates
the whole body. II
is In every drop of
blood. II seems to
work only at the
lungs, but the ter
rible drain and waste
go on all over the
body. To cure con-
sumption, work on
the blood, make it
pure, rich and whole
some, build up the
wasting tissues, put
the body into condi-
ton for a fight with
the dread disease.
DIR. Pierce's Golden
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
In Duplicate.

"What," demanded the first citizen, sis
the use of having banquet Can't the
legislature see the advantages of our town
as we'll without it2n
cit won't do any harm" ventured the
second citizen, ifthey see each advantage
twice"
1t was then decided to have at least a
decanter for each two guests.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
Short Journeys ON Long Road,

Is the characteristic title of a profusely
illustrated book containing over one
hundred pages of charmingly written
descriptions of summer resorts in the
country north and west of Chicago The
reading matter is new, the illustrations
are new, and the information therein will
be new to almost everyone.
A copy of "Short Journeys on Long
Road will be sent free to anyone who
Will enclose ten cents Ito pay postage) to
George H. Heafford, General Passenger
Agent Chicago, Milwaukee & st. Paul
Railway, Chicago, Ill.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

The United Society of Christian Endeavor
And the National Young People Christian
Union will hold their Fourteenth Interna-
tional convention at Boston, July 10 to IA,
1895. The Wabash Railroad has reduced
the rate to one frst-class fare for the
round trip from all stations to Boston for
this occasion. For maps Of route and guide
to Boston write to G. S. Crane, General
Passenger and Ticket Agent, ST. Louis, Mo.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
Ne,t Time Yon Go Vest

Take the Burlington Routes "Black Hills,
Montana and Puget Sound Express"
Leaves Omaha at 4;35 p. III. daily.
Fastest and best train to the Black Hills,
northern Wyoming, the Yellowstone Ma
tional Park, Helena, Butte, Spokane, Seat
tie and Tacoma.
For rates, time table, etc, apply to the
local ticket agent or write
J. FRANCIS,
G. p. & T. A., Burlington Route,
Omaha, Mob
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
Personally Conducted Excursions.

The Great Northern Railway has inaugu-
rated series of personally conducted ex-
cursions from st. Paul to the Pacific coast
and Alaska, and also east via the Great
Lakes, on magnificent passenger steam
ships to Mackinaw, Detroit, Cleveland,
and Buffalo, thence to the Thousand
Islands and the White Mountains. For
further information address g. w. Hal
lock, General Agent 220 Fourth St., Des
Moines, Iowa.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
worlds Columbian Exposition

VIII be of value to the world by illus
trating the improvements in the me-
chanical arts, and eminent physicians
will tell you that the progress In medic
inal agents has been OF equal impor-
lance, and as a strengthening laxative
Syrup of Figs is far in advance Of all
others,
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
An Amateurs Triumph.

Mrs Brown never saw more perfect
acting than Miss Smiths at that amateur
performances
Brown She wasn't In the cast, was shea
Mrs. Brownie; she sat in front seat
and looked as though she enjoyed it,
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Medical Discovery nights III the rBht way.
II will cure o8 per cent. of all cases IL taken
during the early stages ofathe disease. Its
first action Is to put the stomach, bowels,
That makes digestion good and assimilation
quick and thorough IT makes sound healthy
flesh. That is half the battle. That makes
the Discovery" good for those who have not
consumption, but who are lighter and less
robust than they ought to be.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
A Strategist.

"You had better not ask pap for my
hand just now" said Birdie McGinnis to
Pete Amsterdam
why not?"
''He is in an awful rage. He has Just
had to pay one of my millinery bills
"Now's the time to ask him. He will
want to shove you off on somebody else."
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
WHY Paw DoctOrsY

guaranteed cure for Constipation without medicine
or injections, originally sold for SlO0 permanent
cure for Diabetes costing So California Salve for
Pies--gives instant reef--and n positive cure for
To secure these four home cures, and
thus save doctors bills, send IA cents tstamps) 10
Home Cure Co, l0l2 Walnut 81, Philadolphia Pa
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

The man who sits down and waits to be ap.
precated will find himself among uncalled for
baggag, after the limited express has gone by.
- WI tehaH Times.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

HALLS CATARRH CURE is liquid and is
taken internally, and acts directly upon the
blood and mucous surfaces OF the system, Send
for testimonials free. Sold by Druggists, Csc.
f. j. CHENEY g. CO., Props Toledo 0.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
n. and n.

VIII clean silks, wooden goods, ribbons, curtains
and carpets. Unequalled for cleaning house,
killing moths and renoyating grease spots: Price
I5c, cakes for 25c. Address III. and H., Des Mones
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

According to the city directory just
issued, Baltimore has population of
bl7794, an increase during the year of
81 or
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Huxleys tables show that the human
body Is made up of thirteen different
elements, OF which five are gases and eight
solids,
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

What a sense of relief IL IN to know
that you have no more cons, Hindercorns removes
them, and very comforting II is. l5c Mt druggists.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Parker's Ginger Tonic Is popular
for its good work. Suffering tired, sleepless, nery-
GUS women find nothing so soothing and reyiving.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Fifteen of the forty-five pensioners of the
war of 1872 are over LOO wears old.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
WANTED--LADY AGENTS

In every town TO sell Safety Medicine, used
years in physicians private practice Address, stat
Ing experience. Box 1874. a. SPINDEL IL
CO., Topeka, Kansas.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

M. Worth, the famous man milliner,
when he died had $40 men In his employ
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

The income tax of England has changed
eighteen times since 1872 varying from I'd
in the pound to l6d
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Make life n ministry of love, and it will
always be worth living
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

We don't know what we can DO until we
try, and then we frequently find that we
pan't
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Edwin Booth first appeared in 1S49 in a
minor part in Richard Ill.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
"Hanson's Magic Corn salve."

The estimated population Of the world
on January ], 1898, was 800, 600, 900.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

II the price of beef continues to rise it
will soon be cheaper to order quaIl-on-
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
United Society OF Christian Endeavor

Silence may be golden, but it will not
nav debts
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Piso's Cure is the medicine to break up
children's Coughs and Colds.-MRs. M. g..
BLUNT, Sprague, Wash, March s, '94.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

The queen of Greece is not above spend
ing her spare time in cutting out and
making her own Undertaking.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Icebergs in the Atlantic som etimes last
fol 200 years. &W
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

The ancients knew how to cheat
Loaded dice have been found in the ruins
of Herculaneum.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

An undenominational deaconess' home,
costing $4,000, is to be established at
Toledo, o.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Agents Wanted ae S@" a frS Sans
$500 many $780, in %. +. o. Box 1871, New York
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
If the Baby is Cutting Tee'

Be sure and use that old and weltried remedy, MIR
WKsLow's SOOTHING SYRUP for Children Teething.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
Goes Cough BaIsa

1t is estimated that Of the population {
London 100 600 are night workers.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Warranted TO money refunded. Ask yo'
druggist for IL. Price 10 cents.
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

VOB'H OOubH b"HHHHH
Is the Oldest and best. IL will break up Cold gui
err than an ything else u Is always reliable. Try
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

"a Cup OF Parks Tea at night mo-
the bowels In the morning."
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02

Hoods Pills Gsse h aia aSSe asc bilious
Audubon Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Iowa) 1894-1925, 1895-05-02
No Mermaid There.

He was leaning against the railing
at the ferry dock looking decidedly
out of sorts when along came an oily,
smooth-faced man and said:
"How are you OFF,
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1895-09-11
GEMS OF VERSE.
Ont Of Arcadia.

Y0S ~ ~
The country boy was in love and young,
And he urged his cause with an eager tongue,
But the maiden babe him work and wait.
She wanted a man who was strong and great.
He loved his home and tho country life,
And he wanted a tender little wife.
He wished to live in peace and case
In the shade of his spreading old elm trees.
But the maiden babe him go and win
A name she could prize and glory in.
She said she would wait and wed him whom
He had made his place in the ranks of men.
Then tho boy plunged into the city's roar,
And he learned the markets sordid lore,
And he learned that life is an awful fight,
Where the wounded fall to the left and right.
But on their bodies he slowly rose,
And he gained new strength from his van
quished foes.
As he overcame them and beat thom down
He grew in wealth and in wide rcnown.
But his heart was cold. He forgot to feel.
His chilling smile had the glow of steel.
His brain grew keen, and his face grew hard
As he stood a victor, scanned and Scared.
Then his words were treasured throughout
the state,
And all men followed and called him great.
But he smiled when he thought of the country
boy.
And he sneered at love as u childish toy.
-Munsey's Magazine.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1895-09-11
An Unrealized Dream.

He went fishing in the wildwood,
In the dancing mountain brook
Whore he used to fish in childhood
With a bent pin for a hook.
He bethoughu him of the catches
That he used to show with pride,
And the sunburn and the scratches
That adorned his youthful hide.
Now he had a fancy tackle
And q rod of split bamboo,
Flies of every style of hackle,
Clicking reel and silk line, too;
With a twelve pound basket laden,
Harnessed up with straps and bands,
He had patent boots to wade in
And kid gloves upon his hands.
Gayly then he started fishing
In a shady nook and cool,
Where the willows, gently swishing,
Overriding a well known pool.
That was where he used to catch them
When he was an ureliin small;
Surely now he ought to match them
With his fancy rig and all.
But, alas, he could not do it;
Though he fished the pool all day,
Not a trout that amblcd through it
Took the pains to come his way.
But his cuss words made the air blue,
And he whipped the creek TO foam;
Then he smashed his fancy bamboo,
Paid his bill and came back home.
New York Sun.
Daily Kennebec journal. [microfilm reel] (Augusta, Me.) 1870-1975, 1895-09-11

find the rest Of the way to Bristol
alone. In his heart he flinched for a
moment, knowing what he carried and
that he was a stranger; yet for SOM
reason he had al that day distrusted
the smiling clerk and his bland and
double manner, and wished more than
once that he were riding with a better
man.
Get me some brandy" said Wey-
mouth to the landlady, land a glass for
him when he wakes, q good stiff glass.
When he wakes, you know, he'll need
all that he can drink, twas a hard
ride for SO poor q horseman. I'll leave
him here tonight; neither he nor his
horse can go further. l must be on my
way by ten or as soon as my horse is
fit and has had his feed"
"Oh, no, poor lad!' exclaimed the
woman, but there was something dis
turbed and dissatisfied in her tone.
Hell get to no Bristol tonight" she
added, as she trotted off with more
Willingness than she had shown before
and came back with a single clumsy
IOOhluS SIdSS On u tray. weymouth
thanked her andtook it in his hand and
offered it again with much g~allantry;
but she shook her head, not ~displeased,
and went back to her work.
Then the guest cast another glance
at his fellow-traveler, who just at that
moment stirred and groaned again, un-
easily. Weymouth bent toward him,
and shook him gently, holding the
glass to his lips. The drowsy man was
quick to know the welcome odor, and
drank the brandy down with eagerness,
opening his eyes wide and making a
queer face as he finished.
"What's tlis?" said he.
""Tis brandy" said Weymouth.
laughing boyishly. $50 you've forgot
ten how it tastes since noon!"
""Twas not for him!" exclaimed the
woman coming back from her cupboard
angrily. "You might have choked a
sleeping manI' she rallied at Weymouth,