The morning times., 1895-08-11

stralShtforward melancholy ap-
wickedness" pearance an.
do you take an interest in the science
OF advertisement, sir?" he asked cour-
| teously
"A most sympathetic interest,"" / an
1 swered
1T is as yet, sir, in its infancy he
answered me. Need i remind you that
the most universally engrossing subject
In the world is as yet untouched by it?''
''Do you mean the income taxi" asked
"No. sir, mean love"
Yes" said L. II have seen advertise
ments for missing loyers."
| That's not what i meant, - he said, with
| some show of annoyance Tits new held
which l am seeking TO open. May l beg
you, sir, just TO cast your eye over these.
don't ask you for an order. but Just cast
| your eye over them"
/ took from him large number of slips
of paper which he produced from his pocket.
| They were covered with every ella borate and
! ornamental wrjting-rich in capital letters
| and magnificent twirls. They all appeared
| 10 relate TO something that was called
"Gioriana Limited but whether Gloriana
Limited We're lady or number OF ladies
| or a purely business concern or what,
| could not make out very clegarly Some
OF the Slips were short, although well calcu-
lated TO catch the eye; others were longer
and n the form of testimonials.
Now you perceive, sir, !" said my friend,
1.-The unrivaled opening which there is for
an entirely new development. 1t is my
task TO make Gloriana Limited famous
throughout the world, and I'm going to
! do it.''
He was 80 eager that had no choice but
to read the slips. The first raan, Good
morning, / expect Gloriana down every mo-
! ment." The next was 'How's GloIiana?
AS Beautiful as ever, thank you" Another
said, You can't see Cleopatra. but you can
see GloIianaa" Then / found a very
large slip, bearing the following, all in
capital letters: Dukes, Marquises, Earls,
| Yiscounts, BaIons are after GIoriana" And
again; "Gloiiana is highly esteemed by Her
Majesty the Queen and is to be met at the
| Royal Table every day" Il was compelled
to doubt this.) Then Iead Mr.. G-'s opin-
| ion of GIoIiana. q doubted the authenticity
| OF that alsoD Then came See Naples and
| diet What? Not till I've seen GIoTiana!''
You should now study the testimonials, -
| observed my friend They are, assure
| you, all perfectly genuine"
So turned to thetestimonials; they were
| all addressed TO "Gloriana Limited, Love
! Building, Cupid Street Bow" Here are
| two OF three of them:
Dear Madam. untn l met you l was a
| happy and contented mani Now my life
is desert and write sonnets as day long.
| YouIs dcvotedIy, Amoroso Sigher."
Dear Madam, my boy is changed be-
ing since he saw your face. We are send
ing him TO South Africa, but hardly hope
| for a cure"
Lady Goosander begs TO inform Gloriana
Limited that all letters addressed to Sir
George Goosander are opened by Lady
| GoosandeI."
Dear Madam, My heart beats more freely
4. Fxr NprY
| Please send me another Glance-behind my
wife's back. Yours ardently, George Coos
| andeI"
I laid down the testimonials and looked
at my companion.
They are very remarkable documents, y
/ remarked.
You may well say that, sir" he an
swered proudly Il do not suppose that
there is another firm that can boast of
such body of unsolicited testimony"
''Ahr' / cried. Then GIoriana is a
firm" s..
'Firmr' he interrupted passionately.
She is cruel, she is baTbaroUsm' and with
this he took a pencil out of his pocket and
began to scribble on blank slips. l took
the liberty of looking over his shoulder
and read: mo breakfast table is complete
without Gloriana." Ask for Gloriana
| and take no other" Beware of imita.
tons. There is only one Gloriauar" And
! he went on writing in this sort of way SO
rapidly that / could not keep up with him.
At this moment a middle-agcd man of
sour countenance sauntered up and ad.
| dressed him:
Done any good ones to-day?"
splendid cried the enthusiast, holding
out his bundle of slips.
"Ah, well then, you may as we'll come
! home to tea
Tear he cried with a wild CLEAN in
| his eye. And he shouted, Where do you
take tea? i take mine with GIorianar'
And then he fell forward in sort Of col
| lapse, murmuring feebly, "Gloriana is
| the best! l shan't be hapu- till | get her.
Yes, sir, it's sad case na d the middle.
aged man. Until a love affair upset him
| he was the most enterprising advertise
ment agent out. If he'd timed lead bullets
| and called 'em green peas he'd have made
| the public buy 'em, that man would"' And
IN mingled pride and grief he picked up his
charge and marched him off.
l went home extremely thoughtful