St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1895-08-17
LL'SBATTERY
Eow AN AMUSING STORY START
ED ON ITS ROUNDS AT THE
CAPITOL.
QUARREL OVER BULLETIN l.
WHY WILL ANGELL SAID HE
WOULD STAND BY HIS
e', GUNS.
ANGnREDi BY MIR. FULLERTON.
A Scrap without BIOOdshed Be
tween Partisans of st. Paul
and Duluth.

Will Angel, executive clerk in the
governors office, is, as everybody
who knows him is aware, as peace
ably disposed a citizen as the sun
shines on. He is a firm believer in
the aphorism that the pen is
mightier that the sword, and, by
consequence, has chosen the greater
weapon for his implement of war
fare in lifes combat. So when he
heard that his name was being con-
nected, in a rumored way, with the
organization of a new battery in
this city, he was puzzled beyond
measure to guess the source. Some
enemy hath done this he NUT
tered, reflectively, but being exceed
ingly short in that market, the con-
lecture did not aid him in solving
the problem of the rumor's author
ship. He spent one weary, sleepless
night over it, and as the sun peeped
over the eastern hills yesterday
morning, the light of intention burst
upon his faculty for surmise, and he
came down to his office yesterday
resolved in his own mind that Elk
ecutive Agent Fullerton, of the fish
and game commission, had concoct-
ed the invention. His mind is al
ways running on traps and guns
and nets and things" Mr.. Angel
reasoned, land then he's the last
man 1 Misunderstanding about that
Duluth census. Duluth men are
nearly as tender skinned about crit
icisms on their town as the Mime
apolis fellows are. That's it. Full
lerton didn't like to be told the
truth about where the biggest part
of that gain in population came from,
and mentioning annexation was
just poison to him."
1t appeared that when Bulletin No. l
was issued from the census bureau
Thursday afternoon, giving Duluth's
present population, Mr.. Fullerton, who
has his Office on the same floor in the
capitol building, was one of the first
to hear of it. Being an ardent and en-
thusiastic Zenith city man he no
sooner got hold of the gratifying
news than he quit prosecuting poach-
ers and went down to have fun over
the bulletin with Will Angel, who is a
firm and earnest partisan of st. Paul.
For once. in a way, there was a con-
versation over the census without Min
neapolis intruding upon it.
Look here, AngeIl," said Fullerton,
waving the bulletin sheet triumphant
ly, "How's this? Gain in Duluth over
the census of 80 is 26, 2S1-about eighty
per cent! Population in 80 is 1896.
What will we be when we get the state
capitalt'
Mr. Angel looked pityingly at the ex-
cited Duluthian for a moment or two,
and then replied: What will you be
when you get the state capital? You'll
be annexed to st. Paul; that's what
you'll be. You're fond of apnexing up
there; how'd you like to be annexed to
something yourselves?''
Mr.. Fullerton WINGED perceptibly at
the reference to annexation, but re-
covered instantly and retorted:
"Pshawi a mere trif1e taken in; just
few thousand. Seventy-five per cent
of the gain was in the old city,
mot if 1 know anything about
'fggers'," remarked Mr.. Angel, with
quiet emphasis, as he seized his GUS
tomary weapon, his doughty pen, and
proceeded to calculate the Zenith city
hosts marshaled before him in the
bulletin into geographical designation.
you've taken in the Seventh and
Eighth wards; there's 1882. You've
widened out elsewhere probably and
I haven't the data; but this leaves your
actual gain in the city 1O,399, which,
of course, is pretty good for Duluth
That last was too much for Mr.. Full
1erton and he proceeded to attack the
enemy's works. Pretty good, is it?''
he exclaimed. IT'S a big sight better
than ever st. Paul will do. That's
whatr'
Don't you worry over st. Paul."
said Angel. getting a bit warm him
self. You wait till you see our bull
letin. It'll make you sick with envy
1T won't show 1O,399 gain over $780,
Shouted Fullerton.
It'll show more" shouted Angel.
But what if it doesn't?'
It'll be wrong, that's ALL It'll be
nti-padded-padded the wrong way
It'll only go to show that instead of
giving us a full and fair count the
enumerating leeches have been pump
ing the population out of u.s."
who do you s'pose is going to be-
lieve that kind of talk?' asked Fuller
ton.
81 don't care" replied Angel. "Our
bulletin will show a better gain than
yours, if Berg has any regard for his
eternal salvation. If it don't, it's
wrong, I say, and I'll bank on it and
stand by my guns to the end
THAT STILES it, said Fullerton,
turning away and leaving the room
with a CLEAN in his eye And an hour
later it was going the rounds that
Angel must be forming a battery be-
cause he had declared that he would
stand by his guns to the end of
something or other.
And that's how the gentle and peace
full VIII Angel, whose idea of cannon
is that its chief office is to burst and
kill the gunners, got his name con-
nected with forming a new battery
That's his belief, anyway. Mr.. Fuller,
ton denies the imputation, but as the
took several hours asylum in Mime
apolis yesterday to be out of Angels
way, there is less confidence in his
disclaimer than would be agreeable