The morning times., 1895-12-26
MRS. BAYSON AND THE MONROE
DOCTRINE.

Mr. Bayson tabsentmindedly from behind
| his bookl-Business.
Mrs. B.-Real war?
Mr. Is. tnumblingl gl-Guess so.
Mrs. B--Who is this Mr.. Salt-bury?
Mr.. B. correcting her)-You mean Sails
bury.
Mrs. R.-Oh. yes; Salisbury
Mr.. B.-England's prime minister.
Mrs. b. dnterested)-Is the war going to
be with England.
Mr.. b. (mumblng)-Reckon So
Mrs. B.-When?
Mr.. b. (trying to readl-oh, real soon
tomorrow or next week.
Mrs. b. Tin an aggrieved tohe)-And you
never told me word OF it!
Mr.. B.-I thought you could read.
Mrs. B.-You know / never finish the
advertisements before bed time.
Mr.. Il. timpatienuy)-That's so; forgot.
Mrs. B.-What is the war about?
Mr.. Il. reading the last paragraph over for
the sixth timel-Monroe doctrine
Mrs. B.-What on earth is thai?
Mr.. Il. Throwing aside his book in de-
spair)-well, the doctrine of Monroe.
Mrs. B.-I don't know any Monroe?
Mr.. B. tsarcasticallyl-Oh excuse me, 1
thought you were intimately acquainted
with all the Presidents!
Mrs. B. tbIandly WAS he a President?
Mr.. B. (desperately)-Don't you know that
James Monroe was the fifth President of the
United States?
Mrs. b. fartlessly)-so he was. But tell
me about his doctrine?
Mr.. B. twishing to escape an explanatory
oh, it's long story.
Mrs. B. tpoutingl-I don't believe you
care whether know anything or not.
Mr.. b. Gesignediy We'll. it's just this
way. England wants to seize part OF Vene-
ZueIa.
Mrs. B.-That's in South America?
Mr.. B.-Why, SO it is. i see you know
your geography even If you are little
deficient In your historical knowledge.
Mrs. B. ignoring this last remarkl-Well,
what have we todo with England and Vene-
zuela?
Mr.. B.-Don't you see that would be a
violation OF the Monroe doctrine?
Mrs. B.-But Monroe is dead?
Mr.. B. with feigned surprfse)-Is II pos
sible, But it seems his doctrine is not.
Mrs. B.-wen, what of that?
Mr.. b. twearily)-Being alive we propose
to enforce it.
Mrs. B.-But why should we mix up with
other nations affairs?
Mr.. B.-That's a part of the doctrine.
Don't you see there must be a limit? Sup
pose England should claim part of the
United States?
Mrs. B-But she wouldn't dare do that?
Mr.. B.-Why?
Mrs. B.-Because it's ours, and England
wouldn't take anything that didn't belong to
her.
Mr.. B. (deprecatinglyA-oh she wouldn't
Mrs. B.-And are we going to have war
about this absured little quarrel?
Mr. B. (resuming his bookl-0h, don't
know.
Mrs. B.-But you just said so?
Mr.. B.-I was jollying you.
Mrs. b. (haughtilyI-And pray, Mr.. Bay
son, what do you mean by that?
Mr.. B. tendeavoringtochang ethesubject)-
Oh, nothing. Did you see Mrs johnson yes
terday?
Mrs. B-No, did you,
Mr.. B.-Yes, she had on the loveliest
dress.
Mrs. B-That blue cloth?
Mr.. b. tvaguelyl-Yes; isn't il a beauty?
Mrs. B.-Don't you know that is way out
OF style7
Mr.. BIS it? Maybe we don't mean the
same one?
Mrs. B-was II the one with Bonaparte
collar?
Mr.. B. (confusedly)-I guess so.
Mrs. 1D.-But that is a crepon with q
of guipure?
Mr.. B. stammeringl-Er-yes, is ii? So
1t is.
Mrs. B-Maybe it was the one made with
a Van Dyked yoke ana g1got sleeves!
Mr. B. (assuning a confident airl-Yes,
think that was just the one.
Mrs. B.-was the blouse made with bre
telles?
Mr.. b. (uneasily)-I think so.
Mrs. B.-But that is 10 be worn with
cape. Did she have a cape?
Mr.. B. (hopelessly mixed,-I am not sure,
but l think she did.
Mrs. B--with ruffle around the throat
finished in front with u chou and lined with
shot silk?
Mr.. b. (desperatelyl-I believe SO. But
to go back 10 the Monroe doctrine
Mrs. B. dnterrupting him)-Was Mrs. John
sons dress made with a Paquita bodice?
Mr.. b. with n sudden inspiration)-There!
| forgot all about that present of yoursl
Great scott! l must buy it before the store
closes. I'll be back in an hour. (Seizes his
coat and hat and rushes from the room.)
SIGEL ROUSH.