The Madisonian. (Virginia City, Mont.) 1873-1915, 1895-07-27

to the playground, a harder SNOWFALL hit
me Oh the head, so that / fell down uu-
conscious. A few minutes after, when l
again AN to myself, was sitting upon
a chair in the porter's room, and both
ladies, the mother and sister of my
friend, stood near and regarded me anX-
iously.
The next morning She caused inquiry
to be made after my health through
Jacques, and on the following Sunday
I called upon her. I spoke no word. I
! ventured scarcely to raise my eyes, but
I would willingly have thrown myself a
thousand times into fire or water to
again draw u!t1n me the SOlicltous glance
of the beautiful maiden.
I'm the evening" ! invented for myself
Che most marvellous heroic deeds where
with I would fain have aroused her as
constituent and compelled her adlnira-
ton. Anything else I neither desired
nor expected. The unconscious dawn OF
love in the heart o. youth belongs with
its pecpliarities only to pure childhood.
The young heart is foolisltly happy i'll
sacrifice, quietly content and blindly
conceited and vain. It cannot yet love,
it needs but 70 be loved and admired to
bestOw happiness is not its object, and
the only joy it knows is a blissful IN
rest its only need, to receive love With
out b~estowins it, In after years one
gives without receiving and is very we'll
off with that. So everything i'll the
world is arranged III the best manner
where there are people who find their
Joy III giving, and others. who are hap
Diest in Receiving.
But how short and sweet is the one
time when one gives and receives, when
one loves and is beloved. I have known
it, but she who then made me 50 mex
possibly happy has now left lne. How
beautiful was the world when | saw it
with her; how blue the heaven; how
soft the air. We Ilastened, hand in hand,
from place; to place, and wherever We
went, ~laughingly joy stepped forth to
greet us, begging rs TO .linger. We went
laughing, singing, rejoicing along, as
sured ST or good fortune everywhere.
~"S0metines our riotOus delight, over
stepping all bounds, startled sober PEG
pie. But the stern glance softened when
it rested upon US: They are young,
Let them enjoy themselves, said the
old, and went along sorrowfully eInll-
ing. She chung so tightly to my arm,
she nestled So closely to my side, that
I Thought / C0uld never lose her. The
idea Of d possible change never came to
ne, never troubled me. Thus I lived a
long time. Weeks, months, years flew
by, and l hooded them not,
''One evening, after we had spent the
day yet more madly and n!errlly than
) usual, she suddenly appeared to me dis
contentad and cold. A terrible fear
which | am not able to describe fell
L upOn me. An icy Coldness cropt over me.
she will leave you, said to myself,
9 certainly, surely, she will leave you
Il occurred 20 me how little I had really
: concerned myself about her, how I per
L haps had expected too much Of ler truth
IS and COnStancy. For the first tirao [ fell
IS my trust in myself and in her Waver
= and ~anxi0uSly I ga2ad into her eyes
! Bat hor glance turned wearily from III
u and gave me- 10 answer,
my rest was gone, my life no mo
the same. Il is true she still pressed IN
ihifT'i LEItlNty W I-L DJ"JLt t,-'N-AA T-A
D. again, but tho sweetness of hor kiss ha'
3, vanished, Often She pushed mo c0ldl
away, and / saw TO my unuttcrablo COZ
IL row Shat my lov6 WeariCd her, An
whom [ once at a l4t0r hour retulue
IS home, tired and detected, / found IL
4, room dark, cold and empty. She, m
III 10y, my LIGHT, my all, had vanished
10 Now began o miserable existence f
re nc. The less that [ had suffered gnayqe
Us at my heart, but my care wa to conce:
nc this loss from tho world. [ endoaVore
,"0 to show q cheerful, happy c~ounteranc'
| sought the society ct gay yOung Pc
ed PIE. | bestowed great and hitherto u
~ known and ridiculcd care upon my pc
az son and toilet. kIy enemies said Of n
that lad for q long time rouged in O
~ der to hide the palencss Of my cheek
That is not true, but l may as we'll co
an TESS that [ bought O little flask OF new
on invented tiIcturo that was to restore t
TN color Of youth to MY whitening hair.
,o' ""This hylOcritical farce did not lOl
n continue. [ was soon tired OF the strll1
ire aud today tho opinion CT tie world tro
us blcs me 10 moro. / know that my d.
ling has loft me; that nothing w
ers bring her back, and every n who kno'
'ho me may perceive and recognize in my a
my na,ropca tha }oss which 7 suffered. b
l ever lament tho lost y She is wal
ing everywhere. Nothing, nothing c
'ht- take her place to me, and I would WI
owe ingly give everything / possess and
cry joy and happiness that is prepal