Fisherman & farmer. [volume] (Edenton, N.C.) 1887-19??, 1895-02-15
I:UMOR OF THE DAY.

Half loaf is better than NJ yaca-
ton. Life.
1t is all up with the ccnt'u.Ir .a.r
he is knocked of his feet.
Family tics-The one yo1r brother
is always borrowing from yon. Pack.
There are conspicuous exceptions
to the rule that short accounts mako
long friends. Puck.
1t can not he said OF the professions
al bankrupt that "his faiiIugs lean t.
virtues side. Puck.
The longest pole won't knor., thc
persimmons unless the right krud OF
a man has hold of IT. t.-Stntcsmna.
After IA bank cashier has fcathcrcI
his nest he fnncies that he has pInmrI
himself for flight. t.-tmlvcstou News
A correspondent suggests that
mum" is used as title for ladies ON
account Of their well-known love Of
silence. Now YORK Mercury.
Mr.. Cawkcr (after his wife has read
several pages) lis there any news
in your mothers letter, dear Mr..
Cawker-"I haven't come 80 TIA" post
script yet. Truth.
Suffragist q tell you the women
are advancing right along" Gnyhoy
Yes, the married ones single oncs
never get beyond a certain stage, w..
Boston Courier.
Bobby-"Yon ought to see my big
sister. Everybody says she's n hcnu-
tv." Johnny-"I bet she can't hold
a candle 20 my sister fer looks. Why
my sister sold twenty-five tickets for
charity concer!. "-Good News.
"What are you writing, HawIcy?'
"a story I'm going in for fiction.
"Really? For magazlnc?' "No.
For MY tailor. He wants his money,
and I'm telling him I'll send him II
check next week. "-Harper's Brzar.
The one unnoticcd point which the
present food Of illustrated Napolconlc
literature has made more prominent
than any other is that throughout the
great Corsican's whole early life he
needed hair cut -BuffnlC Express.
Mrs. Houser-"Have you any ilcr
what speaking terms means, Mr..
Houser?" Mr.. Houser Certainly,
madam Anywhere from $50 to 800
per night, according to the pronl-
nence of the lecturer. "-ButIalo Cour-
ier.
81 see" observed Mr. Chugwnter,
looking over his morning paper,
they're making another effort to put
a tax on bachelors" 'Is that the
H., ,,.i.
inquired Mrs Chugwatcr. Chicngo
Tribune.
She was n new telephone girl
"What number, please ?" "onc hun
dred and fifteen" 81 didn't catch
that" cone hundred" "Y"s -
"And fifteen" 'sAn right. Here is
100. Fifteen is busy just now. ~
Harper's Bazaar.
Contributor ''Pretty poem, isn't
It?" Magazine Editor -"Ycs, very :
but we cant publish it. ContrIbu-
"Why not?" Magazine Editor
-"Why, anybody can tell ut the first
reading precisely what it means. -
Somerville Journal.
81 don't believe you can rea minds,
doncher know" said chappl" to n
professional mind reader. ''Oh, yes,
I can, replied the latter, pleasantly.
"Bring around somebody with mind
and II! soon prove that can. 49,
Pittsburg Chronicle Telegraph.
Johns Wife-"John, | wish Won Il
saw up some wood for the house.
John-'I wish you wouldn't ask me
to do such work, Maria. Saving
woods thing that even the poorest
tramp refuses to stoop TO, and you
know me. South Boston News.
A little three-year- old girl went to
a children's party. On her return
she said to her parents cat the
party little girl fell off chair. All
the other girls laughed, bnt | didn t. ,
"Well, why didn't you lan2hT'
"'Cause ! was the one that fell oil. ~
-Tid-Bits