Evening star., 1895-06-01
BURGLAR AND PUDDING.
The Eject Was Notifying to q Proud
Chicago Family.

Chicago Family.
From the Chicago Daily Intcr-Ocean
a certain family in a popular residence
district on the north shore Is In temporary
disgrace with its neighbors and all because
OF series of ludicrous misadventures in
which the members of the family referre d
to were the actors, and which resulted in
racket that made some people think the
noise-makers had got mixed up in their
dates and We're celebrating the Fourth Of
July six or seven weeks ahead of time.
The family consists of three members,
father, mother and twelve-year-o son. 1t
occupies a pleasant home ard has been al
ways regarded by friends and acQuaint-
ances as the possessor of domestic hap
piness of an unadulterated brand. It would,
no doubt. still hold a good title to general
esteem if its serenity had not been dis
turbed some time ago by visitor. The
visitor was parsonage that has the fac
ulty of making himself ubiquitous in Chi
cago-to wit, gentlemanly, Industrious
burglar.
Mr.. Burglar took precautions to give the
family as little trouble as possible during
his visitation. Toward this end he re-
moved his shoes before crawling through
the pantry window which he had selected
he desired to strengthen himself with a
slight collation. before proceeding to active
labor. It was this lunch that spoiled his en-
terprise. In the cleaning he mstook a bot
tie of Worcestershire sauce for imported
beer. and he helped himself to a generous
swis of the liquid to wash down some sand
wiches he had eaten. The fiery relish took
the robbers breath away and a severe fit
of coughing aroused the household. The
thief escaped, knocking down a shelf full
OF crockery as he squeezed himself through
scared that he forgot to pick up his shoes
In passing.
The cough, which was louder and more
rampant than the most boisterous lung
disturbance ever described in patent med
icine literature. the avalanche of cups,
dishes and preserve bottles, and the shoes,
which the milkman next morning suggested
might have been stolen from a suicide,
nave proved monuments of terror to the
family ever since. Father, mother or son
has scarcely slept. Every night there is
a pilgrimage through the rooms and a
thorough examination of closets. cellar
and attic. When the inQuisitors retire to
bed 1t Is only to fall into semi-slumber
and dream of masks. dark lanterns, re-
volyers and other accessories of the mid
| night marauder The family is living In a
state of constant alarm.
The menu of Sundays dinner included
English plum pudding. Plum pudding is
ABOUT the last thing that nervous people
should eat. When taken In large quantities
by little boys 1t is positively hobgoblin pro-
ducing. The little boy in the north shore
home had no appetite for anything only
!. plum pudding Sunday. He ate 1t at dinner
and again at supper, and would have eaten
more later only he fell asleep on the
sofa and had to be carried to bed. The in
| evitable, of course. happened. He had an
attack of somnambulism about midnight
| and got up to search for burglars and plum
| pudding
When his mother. awaking from fftful
! sleep, discovered the outline of ghost-like
| visitor in her room she screamed "Murder!'
| In an instant paterfamilias was on the
| floor ard moment later two white-robed
! figures were rolling over on the carpet In
| hopeless confusion.
| IT'S 1, papa" roared the boy, who had
| been literally choked into consciousness
| Meantime the mother kept up a tornado
| Of yells believing her husband was being
| murdered. The boy, when he got through
| shouting on his own account, commenced
| yelling for the sake of his mother, under
| the impression that some one was attack
| ing her.
| It took several minutes to straighten
| things out When all was quiet everybody
| nelghborhood sat Cd all night and was
| afraid to venture out to look for an ex-
| PLANTATION Of the noise. The actors In the
| racket have kept a discreet silence. The
| father told friend yesterday that there
| is sewer gas in his house and it is likely
| he is locking for an excuse to move away.