The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1895-11-13
STORIES OF AHUMoRIsT.
Jokes Played by Eugene Field Upon
His Friends-ISow lie Paid Debt.

was q joker al an times. The most OF
his humor was never printed, for il was
continuous in its happening. went FOR
ward every day. when be was city Edition
Of the Kansas City Times he found q
great amusement in annoying one Of the
staId and respectable characters employ
ed on the paper. This was back in the
very early eighties.
The gentleman who was the target FOR
Fields fun was party called Ferguson.
He was one Of the make-ups on the pa
per. and a staI5 and dignifed gentleman.
he was intensely respectable, and in Wy
audOtte. where he resided. just over the
line from Kansas city. he was the leader
OF a local temperance society. For over
a year, Field on coming down 10 the pa-
per 20 60 60 WORK would write personal
concerning Ferguson. Sometimes Its
phraslng varied but generally u run Ike
this
Mr. John Ferguson, the well-kuowl,
makeup of the Times composing room.
appeared for work yesterday evening IT.
his usual beastly state of intoXicauo =
This entertaining biz Field would send
down 10 some bundle Of copy ana the oth-
efs OF me COMPOSING room VINO We're ln
a fashion DO taclt league with Field, would
set IL up and say nothing Poor Ferguson
knew that this awful personal was in
their minds, and every night would 60
carefully over every gally for the pur-
pose OF locating ana Killing II. IL gave
him vast trouble. Every now and then
Field would not write his personal
about Ferguson. and then the be-devlled
Ferguson was worse of than ever. AZ
long as he couldn't find it, il might stiI
be there. It almost drove The poor man
of the paper. Now and then IL escaped
his eagle eye and was printed. On sucn
occasions Ferguson burdens We're be-
yond the power OF even Christian spirit
10 bear
They tell a story Of Field in Kansas City
which shows the Quickness of mis- inVen-
Hsmnn q h. Har a. ..HI D. arH
He was going TO his room about 3 clock
in the morning just after the paper was
up" on the other side OF tine street
his attention was called 10 q row. A sturdy
policeman had captured two heavily lOad4
ed printers, and despite their maudlin ex-
postuatiOns was dragging them TO the
bastile Fields kind heart bled for the
poor printers. They were on mis- paper
too.
An idea sliced him. His room was near
al hand, and he hurriedly climbed the
stairs to the third story which he inhab-
tied and standing near the open window
he shrieked:
Murder! murderl help. help"' and all
in a shrill falsetto voice.
The policeman i'm charge Of the unhap-
py printers stopped irresOlute Very evil
IDENTIFY woman was being murdered
Should he go TO her rescue, or should
he hang on to his drunken printers. 1t
took only moment to decide. He cast
the two followers of Ben Franklin from
him and flew swiftly TO the rescue BY
Fields floor that humorist was in bed
and apparently sound asleep. The police
fore he convinced himself that no blood
had been shed, pending which the printers
made an intelligent escape. The police
man afterward told the story to his mates
ana declared that the cries came from the
banshee of his family, who, it would
seem, was wont to howl just before the
death of some member Of the noble family
household it patronized. The policeman,
however. is yet alive.
Back in Kansas City is a gentleman who
was great admirer of Fields. This is
George CASTOR, highly educated Italian,
who keeps a place where refreshments
are sold, and in some instances given
away
Like every members of the Kansas City
gang Of 1880, Field was not getting giant
wages, and like every other member Of
the Kansas City gang in 1850. he owed a
One day CASTOR stood talking over his
bar with another member of the news
paper family, named Billy Baker.
Il wonder where is Eugene Field these
uaysY said CASTOR thOughtfully, Il
haven't seen him for two weeks. He
owes me over $500. Now / wonder-con-
tlnued CASTOR in retrospective way. fun
OF Iepfoach-l wonder II Gene keeps
away just on account of that? Why,
don't care for the bill; If he were to come
in I'd give Ii TO him."
If Field were to come here right now
would you give him his biIl?" asked
Baker. The worthy Mr.. Baker had a
Keen eye and ear for business, and if
REID 8 appearance at Gastons would ie-
lieve him Of debt Baker was quite
enough his friend to go and hunt him I'D.
mean It, answered CASTOR, with
eager friendship, you bring Gene here
l give him his bill in a minute"
1t didn't take Baker ten minutes to
round up Field. He told him he was
wanted over to Gastons on impOrtant
business, and to come at once. Field was
curious TO know the nature of the COM
merclal transaction that called for his
pI Pre- hiee at Ga cast Baker wouldn'
Baker and Field entered Gastons s, that
amiable boniface beamed from behind
the bar and said:
Gene, have you got 10 cents2'
WhyY' asked Gene suspiciously.
. Never mind why said CASTOR, fork
II over. There" he continued as Gene gave
up the coin, there is q. receipt in full.
Now you don't owe me cent" And Gas
ton passed over TO the astonished funny
man his receipt for over 500 Indebtedness.
Baker, absence.
Field took it and read it, and looked
with an air of wonder at CASTOR. AT last
This very good joke began to dawn on him.
Did that 10 cents pay my bill i'm full.
George?" asked Field.
1T did" repeated Castor, with an air
OF genial triumph, folding his arms.
so 1 m all settled up?" said Field
thoughtfully. well, that's a good thing.
But, come, Castor, isn't ii the custom for
the house to treat on occasions like this? %
upon the wine went round.
When Field was city editor of the Kan
sas City Times he was assisted by a force
OF two reporters. Ordinarily there was
not much to do; at any rate, there wasn't
much done, which amounts to the same
thing
At this time there boarded at the Coats
mouse a newspaper angel in the guise of
an OLD bachelor, sea captain, rich and
retired from business. Leaving the sea
10 itself, he had anchored in mid-conti-
nent to pass his remaining DAYS This
old sea monster had a story which it took
him about an hour to tell. 1t was ali
about a terrific storm at sea which re-
suited in his being wrecked and cast
away. There was nothing the old nauti.
cal gentleman liked better than to tel
this story. And he would buy the drinks
for any crowd several times who would
listen to il. Especially was he fond OF
the company of Gene Field, who otter
strolled up TO the Coats house to listen tc
the story and drink in the Inspiration thai
accompanied it,
On one particular occasion Field called
his local force about him. 1t was a win
ter midnight, the town was dead and dull
and there was nothing to do. He decided
that he and his two trusty reporter:
would repair to the Coats house and lis
ten to the story of the seafaring man
No sooner said than done. Ten minute.
later found them in the hotel barroon
bending attentive ears while their marin,
friend Overhauled his yarn. AS usual
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