The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-03-28

TELL. HIM TO DRAW ON Me-.
Mr.. Allen has a large stock of fresl
stories on hand and he always take,
great pleasure in entertaining his listen
ers by telling them. While they are
convulsed with laughter, his face is as
calm and serene as the countenance of
a philosopher or professor of theology.
While the house, during its last ses-
sion, had under consideration what
was known as the seigniorage bill, Mr..
Allen spoke in favor of that measure.
but depressed to make a few remarks
concerning a speech which Abraham ;.
Hewitt. of New York, had delivered at
banquet. in the course of which Mr..
Hewitt had severely criticised the peO-
pie of the south. Mr.. Allen said: Il do
not think that any man ought to be
held down TO very rigid account for
an after-dinncr speech at banquet.
Why, sir, ! recollect not long ago /
went to banquet in Baltimore where
everything was so good, where | was
surrounded by so many big rich men
that by the time my turn came to
speak l felt so well that / addressed
them as fellow capitalists
This bright saying elected applause
and laughter. which continued for some
little time Mr.. Allen then referred to
speech which had been made in Bal
timore by Congressman Patterson, of
Tennessee, in reply to ex-MayOr Hew-
lit, in which Col. Patterson had made
number of very Incorporate and
heated assertions Mr.. Allen, refer
ring To the Patterson-Hewitt speech,
said: Being aware of the influence
surrounding a banquet, If l did not
know of the abstemious habits of my
friend from Tennessee. ! would have
thought on reading his speech that he
had gotten somewhat under the infiu-
ences that affected another Tennes-
seean that travelling man told me
about meeting once in Tennessee.
This travelling man was sitting on n
counter talking to a merchant about
selling him goods; ne and the merchant
got into a general conversation, and
among other things he said to the ner-
chant: 4 used to sell these goods down
in Kaufman county, Tex
AT this, seedy, ragged, handbook
ing fellow who was sitting on the same
counter, said: My friend, did you say
Won had lived in kaufman county, Tex?'
eyes, sir
"'Did you ever know a man ont
there by the name of John +. Will
liams?'
"'Oh. yes; used to sell John goods
"'Well. sir. he is my brother
"'Ah! am glad TO meet YOU
"'Yes, sir, John Williams is my
brother. How was John when you saw
him"
"'0h. John was doing very well. He
had a good farm, with plenty of stock
on it; he was out OF debt and doing
we'll
Well. my friend. if YOU should be-
back in Kaufman county at any time,
and see anything of John, l wish you
would tell HIM that / am mighty hard
up. that my farm is mort gagged. and
do not believe that am ever going to
be able 10 raise and educate my chill
dren Times are mighty hard with me,
and do not see any chance 70 get out
of debt; and if he Is ever going to help
me. now is the time.
After awhile this travelling man felt
like taking a drink. and he invited
Johns brother out To take a drink with
him. When the drink began 70 have
its effect. the man said: 80 you know
my brother John ont in Texas? Wen,
when You 90 out there, say that l am
getting along tolera bly, well, that
amt making any great money, but l
am doing pretty Well
They Sauntered around awhile. and
the travelling man asked his acqUaint-
anee TO take another drink. Then the
fellow began TO warm up. He said:
SO YOU know my brother John ont in
kaufman county, Tex. Well. # you
are out there al any time, Just tell him
that | am making a good living and am
getting along first rate
Late in the evening my friend met
the fellow again: ne had meanwhile
had two or three more drinks and was
pretty mellow. so he said: \ gu are the
gentleman that knowed my brother
J-hn out in kaufman county. Well. Il
B YOU - tA1NA 10 AsitsA4Ais1lA NtFs.A--
and sec anything OF John. tell him If
he needs anything. just 70 draw on me-
Now under the influence Of one Il
these New York banquetS. with al
that they have good TO eat and the &C
compartments. one feels bv The time
he speaking begins Ike telling the rest
OF the world 70 draw on him There
fore. |. on my Own motion. would never
quote banquet speech on anybody be-
cause I do not think il i exactly the
/ fair thing"
Another good story i told by the
witty Mississippi statesman. He was
elected 10 the Fiftieth congress by a
slim ma jority over his opponent and Il
! was with much difficulty that he cap
; fu-ed the election and maintained his
F: ssat u TIC house