The Anaconda standard., 1895-12-13
HAVE THE TELEGRAPH HABIT
Cranks Who Use the Wires for the Most
insignificant Messages.

insignificant Messages.
Gan sonts of cranks in the world" said
the girl in the telegraph off1ce OF
Rroadwav hotel to a New York World re-
oorsar "b,Yt 1 think the telegraph cranks
are the queerest. Against the rules OF the
of,ca 10 give away our business, you
LnoVv hut a body can generalize. Do you
knovv there are lots of men who have the
telerraph habit? II rs like the cigarette
nab,t or the drink habit. When 1t once
sas,ens ON a man It Is seldom he ever
hrea,xs himself of II tnl he's broke him
self. That's a poor pun. but IT'S true. III
A. wasn't for the telegraph crank we
wouldn't begin to do the business we 90.
You'd be surprised to know the amount
Of money some men dissipate on any ana
every excuse.
"AIl sorts of state secrets go over the
wires and Important affairs are transact
| ed by telegraph every day, besides the
,,sual routine of deaths and weddings
| and business orders and women starting
on Journeys notifying their friends TO
| meet them at the station. But the regu-
| lar telegraph crank comes into the hotel
and rushes into the Office here and tele-
| era mis- half a dozen of his friends: Ar
| rived safely Next time, half an hour
| laaer he wires them to address mail to
! him here. Shortly after that he advises
them that he will leave New York on
Monday. After awhile he changes his
mind and wires that he will stay TIL
| Tuesday. The next morning he worries
because ne has not heard from home and
wires TO ask them IL anything Is the
matter He gets a letter by noon and
| wires again to say that the letter came
safely by the next mail and he will an
swer by the afternoon post. Maybe you
think / exaggerate. but / don't. why
In a week a telegraph crank VIII often
give me his entire pedigree and most OF
his family secrets.
"a lot OF men do their love-making by
telegraph and a lot more do their joking
with business friends in the same way
ANY amount of chaff goes over the wirs
at regular tariff rates. Some men have q
fad for sending wedding oongratulationl
and death condolences by telegraph Il
| great people who probably never heard o
| them. Egotism Is at the bottom of mos
of this particular kind of insanity. Tn
. man thinks IL makes him look importan
! TO rush into a telegraph office as soon a
! he strikes the town and dash on a mes
1 sage.
somehow acts as a sedative to let oi
! steam on a telegraph blank. l hate
4 Have you sent itr How long will Il tax
4 TO get there? How soon win / get a
answer?' And men of business snS CON
\ non sense, who ought to know beIts'
: ask these questions over and over aeali
The way people write telegrams make
: me smile. / know a millionaire who wi
? work for i've minutes to get what he IA
60 say In 10 words for a quarter But u
!, uaily people write around Robin Hood
4 barn when they begin a telegram and IA
a twice as many words as are necessar.
= Women are the worst for that. but ver
u few men or women seem 20 understar
~ the art OF brevity.
"a Another funny thing Is that telegram
= usually written In a hurry and sometim
"a under stress of great excitement. are II
4 erary curiosities In the line OF spellin
- Funeral Is one OF the words that is
! stumbling block 10 the mourner. Until'
- another hoodoo word. You would be su
- prised at the photography OF the averal
ly American in a hurry. You learn lots
"A | things in a telegraph once. but you ha
re TO keep your mouth shut. oh. a body e
es generalize. OF course"