The Dalles times-mountaineer. [volume] (The Dalles, Or.) 1882-1904, 1895-10-19

| Lie SIdI6S tOOh OA
Spain's trouble with Cuba to make that
country pay the Mora claim. If the
| United States would or could only get
| into trouble serious enough to make
it pay its debts to private citizens, it
would be a national blessing. 1t is a
notorious fact that the departments
look upon every bill presented them as
fraud, and every American citizen who
is creditor of the government as a
thief. 1t is time the everlasting red
tape be dispensed with, and the clerks
who run the business made to pay
approved and allowed claims against
the government as speedily as they do
their own salaries.
Seattle has a mystery in the shape
| of a human skull that "looks like an
orange that has been squeezed. The
left side of the skull is abnormally de-
veloped, and the right side is as fiat as
board. The forehead slopes directly
back, and the nose bone is twisted to
the right. Ten teeth have been pulled
from each jaw, leaving three perfect
| double teeth on either side of both
| Jaws" We have not heard of any
| Washington politicians dying, but the
description would indicate the skull
belonged to either John B. Allen or
Ankeney of Walla Walla, the squeezed
part suggesting the latter, the ex-
tracted teeth, the former.
Lord Sackville is out in pamphlet
| attacking Americans in general and
President Cleveland and ex-secretary
Bayard in particular. Lord Sackville
| was the gentleman who mixed himself
| up in American politics, and was
promptly bounced out of the country
by President Cleveland, near the close
of his first presidential term. He was
Sir Lionel West at the time, and made
such an utter ass of himself that on his
return home his own people rec
ognized his pecliar fitness for the
peerage. He retains all his pristine
asininity along with his title, and is
easily recognized by his unchanged
bray.
The gold product of the world is
larger now than ever before, reaching
almost 5000, 100000 a year. The in
crease is not all due to the newly dis
covered fields of Africa, though
largely so. The non-use of silver has
stimulated gold production, and that
of the United States increased 81 ,000,-
600, this year as compared to 1894.
From present indications throughout
the world, especially should the Afri-
can fields yield anything like what is
claimed for them, the ratio of the met
ais will be again favorable to silver,
and it will take its old place as a
money metal, unless, indeed, gold
should become so plentiful as to de-
stroy it altogether.
We are pleased indeed to note the
confidence Senator Mitchell has
that the appropriation for the boat
railway will pass at this session of con-
gress, and that the work will be pros
ecuted to an early completion. The
canal and locks at the Cascades will be
opened this winter, or at least by
March 1st. This work will have cost
in round numbers 81, 100000, and un-
less supplemented by overcoming the
obstruction between this point and
Cello the work will prove beneficial to
only small section of the Inland
Empire. The completion of boat
railway will give all the upper country
the benefit of the work, and it is to be
hoped that the matter can be put in
shape that the work can be begun
next year.
Some of our Republican exchanges
are making great noise over the al
legged attempt of Bayard, Whitney and
others to nominate President Cleve-
land for tbi<d term. There is moth
ing to show that the president desires
a thru term, but there is not school
boy 10 years old in the whole country
but that knows that neither Mr.. Cleve-
land nor any other man could be
elected president of this government
for the third time. There never was
but one set of men who. seriously
the idea of electing any
president to the third term, and that
exception was the 306 who detracted
from the reputation of Grant by their
effort. Mr.. Cleveland will not be
for the third term, if for no
other reason, that he knows he would |
be beaten.
Doctor Parkhurst, for the past year
decidedly the most prominent man in
the great city of New York, already
shows signs of moral deterioration
from his contact with politicians. |
When it is remembered that he is q |
preacher and gifted preacher too, his
remark concerning the enforcement of |
the excise law might be classed as sac
rilege. He said: 1.-The excise law will |
be enforced so long as God Almighty
and Theodore Roosevelt are with u.s."
Thus to make the Deity dependant
upon Theodore Roosevelt or any other
mortal is .atch-phrase jest unworthy
Of its author. From present appear
ances Parkhurst is using the pulpit,
simply as means of enabling him to
gather in the political plunder, and as
! clergyman he is demoralizing to all
Christian sentiment.
"Bloody Brides" Waite, the quon.
lam governor of Colorado, arrived at
canton, Ohio, recently on Sunday. AS
he Methodist conference was in ses
ion there Waite instead of speaking
N political matters, which would have
'een a violation of the law, delivered
sermon on the text: "Render unto
cesar that which is Caesar's, and unto
iod that which is Gods" 1t is per-
APPS needless to add that the sermon
7as a red-hot Populist speech, and it
imply serves to show to what lengths
man will go when he gets astride of
is favorite hobby. Waite rather sac
ilegiously says, in speaking of the
lembers of the conference then in |
ession: 81 wonder how many of them ,
ode to this conference on a half-fare
ass; Imagine Christ riding from :
-alilee to Jericho on half-rate ticket {
by Pontius PLATE /
rice" /
The Roseburg Review says: "Un- d
,ss the next Republican state conyen-