The morning times., 1895-07-14

WHO THE DEUCE
CAN WRITE A
STORY ON DAY
LIKE THIS?"
1115.-I wish the - these - people
hadn't asked me 10 write for
their - paper!
:45-HuIIo! Viii That do?
1900 Hang ii, that's no use!
1880 suppose if i happened TO have a
head instead of a turnip | could
write that story
l 2 30 Yes NJ BY Jove, yes, Where's
that pen? fOh, where the -?
All right here it Is! Now, then!
(ScribbIel
1:OO.-Lunch! Good, believe i;'s gong,
l:30.-Now III just knock it off (scrb-
2:15.-Well, l don't quite see my way to
-. Oh, yes, l dol Good,
That's not so bad
3 :00.-0ne. two, three-three hundred
words a page Well I'yc put that
in in good time. anyhow. Where's
that pipe?
3.15-I think thisll fetch EN-. Pitched
in tie passdn. by Jove!
3:40.-Oh, l say, look here! I've only
got about 200 words, and |
want 2,OCO What the deuce shall
/ do?
3:5O.-I must pad it, you know. She
accepting the fool, though; it's
absurd. you know.
4:15.-0h. Confound it,
4:45.-Now. 4 let's sce-twu, four, six,
seven. Good I'm in the straight,
5:0O.-Thank heaven, that's done! Now
/ suppose ! must read the thing
over. l know it's awful rot Well.
that's their lookout; they've bought
it.
5:O3.-It's not so bed, though. after all
sill rather like that. | don't know f,
but it seems rather original,
5:10.-H'ml I've read worse stories than
this.
520.-No, . I'm hanged If I touch a word
Of it It's not half bad
: :25 Pretty smart ending
5:30.-Wrll, if there are a dozen men in
England who can write a better
story than that l should like to
see 'em, that's all.
5:35.-Puff, puff, puff, puff! Well.
shan't touch a pen again to-day.
There it is-HCw a Story Is Written, By
One Who Has Done 1t. Other eminent
writer's" may pursue other methods. Some,
/ believe, take country walks or country
cottages. Others work steady two hours
and collect impressions" (which may be
very good fun in scciety for the rest OF
the day. Others wait for inspiration Uaese
have private mcans). The above record
embams my particular method. 1t VIII
be observed that the nominal working day
is rather long, but there a re ample cases OF
deSultory reflection There are a.so about
two hours Of acute misery and bitter self
contempt. Still, the ultimate result is
highly satisfactory to myself. and | be-
lieve that any author who pursue smy
method VIII produce results equally salts
factory to myself
The only drawback is that friend
VINO enters while an iEcuhating my ideas
in the warmth OF the armchair always
insists that | am asleep: this is injurious
and offensive. l have described the sue
ceeding morning is devoted to the process
OF worrying. Worrying is the means by
which an author seeks to attain al elegant
style and correct grammar. With this
object he worries his manuscript, inserting
here highly colorcd epithet, dc!eting there
a split intinitive (it is very hard rot to
occasionally spit your inilnltlves), or the
Superfluouss "aLds" before his Witches"
tthlngs cropping eut even III ThaCkeray and
which many estiInabte writers go wrong in J.
But some say that if you are pressed for
time this process may be emitted, seeing
that, from a merkja point of view, it is
n waste of time.apd moreover tends to
diminish the reviewers stock of harm
less pleasures. Yet an unpopular writer
should by no means omit it; it preserves
sclf-respect in the face of a neglectfui
world. As for spelling they pcll very fairly
well at the typew riter's.
A RETR ACTION.
That remark fabont the dozen men
in England" II prescEts mcmentary phase
of feeling not reasoned opinion.
is 1T PEACE, JEHU?
The storm of controversy concerning
the aims and tendcRcies, merits and de-
merits Of moGerli plays and novels, seem
To be gradually and slowly dying away.
Probably-or, we may make bold to say,
certainly-the public has become bored
with it; perhaps the controversialists
have said all they have to say, or, at least,
all that anybody asks them to say. Be
the cause of the lull what it may, we may
heartily he thankful for it. A very regret
able thing seemed at one time likely to
happen. Writers were being divided into
two opposing camps, each party carrying
with ii its bands of adherents and being
pursued by the angry cries OF its opponents.
play would tell you, not indeed what its
glance at a novel, or the mere title of
a play would tell you what its
merits were. but what they would be de-
cIared to be in this or that paper and by
this or that critic, its defects in the eyes
of another organ of opinion and another
school OF commentators could be predicted
with equal certainty On the one side were
to stand the wholesome" books, on the
other the ''unwholesOme." This is the
language of the conservative critics. the
new meant the same when they spoke of
n cnntraStod NTH sSbo1