davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
PITH AND POINT.

The inference of modern experience
is to the effect that there is nothing
calls more earnestly for reform thar
reform itself.-Richmond Dispatch.
Don't be discouraged because yor
are not good enough. 1t is the mar
who thinks he is good enough that we
are discouraged about.-Youpg Mems
Era.
AIR said the statesman, gov.
ernment trying my plan at last
Wife - whats that?r Statesman
Borrowing moneyr'-Cleveland Plain
dealer.
Where i'm thunder are you going
with that stove and all those over.
coats?" Il am going. my friend, to
spend the winter in Florida. Atlanta
Constitution.
"A SANDER Refuted. Wife (who is
very homely)-"Y never did Z kindly
act in your life" Sarcastic Husband
what Not even when married you,
eh?'-Texas Siftings.
There is one good thing to be SAID
about Thompkins. He is perfectly
truthful" "Of course he is. He is too
stingy to make an cxtravagant state
mcnt. Iowa Falls Citizen.
Watts What do you think of this
idea that there are medicinal virtues
in music?" Potts-'I believe it. Lots
of these new popular airs make me
sick. indianapolis journal.
-Watts-"Isn't there a play called
the kentucky Colonel?'" Potts-'T
believe there is. Think il is some sort
of a tank drama, though / am not
sure. indianapolis Journal.
-"Sayin' de right thing at de right
time said Uncle Eben, lam er great
gif'. But not sayin' anything at dc
right time am mos CT good an er heap
mo reli'ble. Washington Star.
He" What allowance do You think
your father ought To make us when we
are married." Shc-''Well. If he makes
ample allowance for your faults,
think he will be doing all that can be
expected of him. "-Tit-Bits.
The Wrong Place. -Spencer-''It's
all nonsense saying that if you wink
at the girl who runs the soda fountain
she'll put a stick in your drink" Fer
guson-"Did you try it?' Spencer-"I
did. ! got the stick, but not in my
drink. N. Y. World.
Strong Man.-Bacop-"That man
Black, who plays the heavy william in
the new drama, must have a wonder
full constitution. Egbert- Why?"
Bacon-''IIe smokes an entire box of
cigarettes in the FIRST act and doesn't
die until the last act. "-Yonkers
Statesman.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
COULDN'T FOOL HIM.
Your Uncle william Knew All About Those
Little Games.


'Im on to 'cm bigger'n house." he
chucllled as he halted at the front door
of the Fort street depot the other after
noon.
His remark was directed TO a police
man, and the officer looked him over
and found him to be gray-haired old
man with two satchels and look of
triumph.
.'You bet they don't gum-game your
Uncle William with his eyes wide
OPEN" continued the man as a grin COW
cred his face.
"They might add it thirty years
ago, but not to-day, thank YET
"What's the matter?' asked the Off
Ger.
"Feller tried to hornswaggle your
Uncle William up the street. Sized
up fur hayseed and worked a racket
fifty years old. Thought all he had to
do was to throw out his hook and catch
a sucker"
what was the raclxet?'
"Why, as | was walkin' along Teller
overtalSes men and SEE ! dropped my
wallet. ! winks at him. hut he seq he
saw me drop IT, winl<s agin and tells
him to keep it fur his honesty. The
game is as old as the hills, You know.
Feller expects you are going to pocket
the calf-skin and hand him over ten
dollar bill. Can't fool your Uncle Will
liam on gum-games"
Have you felt to see if your wallet
is all safe?" asked the officer.
''Of course its safe, replied the old
man as he dropped his satchel to search
his pockets. I'm not one of the kind
who goes around losin' -"
What's the NATTER"
''She's gone!
'Your wallet?"
'Yes-and over forty dollars in il.
had it in my hind-pocllet, and it must
hev dropped out. BY gum, but that
crittcr found it sure's shootin'!''
And you told him to keep it for his
honesty"
"Dun my shucks, but did E! Your
Uncle William has went and gone and
gumgamed himself out of forty big
dollars, and lot of papers worth half
a thousand more! Watch them satch-
els I'm off to look fur that man, and
if don't come back tell any inquirin
friends to look for me in the idiot asy
lum r'-Dctroit Free Press.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
NOT YET WHIPPED.
Two Striking Incidents of the Franco
German War.

German war.
\ French army surgeon. Or. Sarazin,
writing of his experiences during the
Franco-German war, mentions two
striking incidents of the disastrous
battle of Fruaschwiller. lie was hard
at worl among the wounded in the
field hospital The French forces had
been routed. and were in full retreat.
The da- was lost hopelessiy.
Suddenly the doctor looked up and
saw little French soldier with his
lSnapSacll ON his back aud his muslxet in
his hand. looking TRANQUILITY up the
street toward the enemv's position. At
that moment let'cr-boX against the
wall caught his eve. He stopped. took
ont book. Scribhled few lines.
folded the leaf. addressed IL and
dropped IL into the box. Then he
looked at the lock of his musl1et. and
alone toolI up his march against the
tiCrman army,
What became Of that brave boy?-'
Dr. Sarazin asks. What insensate
courage pushed him thus To the front,
one hoy against an army. when thirty
thousand men were fleeing behind
him3 To whom did he contide his last
thOught9 ! would gladly have saved
that letter. bu; the next morning the
box was gone. The Russians had car
ried il away
Hardly had this boy-Lero disap-
pcared when the doctor noticed six
miners Of the engineer corps. who came
mp with pickaNeS to make loopholes in
the walls OF the buildings. They were
n little late. There were no longer
any men Ia put behind the lOOpholes.
30 the miners reasoned. for presently
the doctor saw them comforting to-
gether. Then they put down their pick
axes. took up some muslSets and cart
ridges. aud like the boy before them,
they marched against the German
army.-Youth'S Companion.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

ing out over thC rnv Of gSraniums. She
saw the new ncighbur at window in
the Leutz building. He was smoking
pipe and reading Sne inferred
that he was alone in the world and
had engaged ono Of the two front
rooms from 'ir. Icutz. the dclicatcsSCn
man.
She saw him often enough after that.
and without having any especial inter
est in his affairs, She learned that
while he was in his room he spent most
Of his time In reading. that nc was
rather fine-IoOlSing man in his black
suit that he attended church every
sunday morn NJ and went away some
where for his meals three times a day.
that he wasn't a drinking man and that
his establishment for grinding and gen
eral repairing didn't appear to he over
whelmed with work.
Perhaps She would never have known
any more about him If he had not hap
pencd To stroll along her side Of the
street one summer evening just before
dusk
Mrs Nackus was AZ the window
above and Eleanor stood in front of the
store. The mother heard this CONVEX
satiOn:
..Good evening. and are you the
rObine'
The rObiue No. sir"
AHA. but You are the robin that ]
hear singing every day. You have
very sweet voice
Thank YOU. sir.
when first heard IL / thought II was
a bird"
The child began laughing. and Mrs.
MaclSus. who had stern notions Of pro-
priety. suddenly thrust her head out Of
the window. and said;
Nellie. you mustn't talk TO strau-
gers"
Mr.. Throbcrty looked mp in alarm.
and after n moments hr>itancy. said:
you r. right, ma'am: was about To
steal i.er.
Eleanor laughed again. and the
ncighbor started acru>S the street, hut
he suddenly turned ami said: 1t i
hut right you should know. ma am,
that I meant NO harm ~ compliment
in the child. shes n sweet a. her
mother. without the sharpness Of the
tongue. am proud to be neighbor
- a lady like you>elf. hut I will tell
You this. ma'am. that You shouldn't
have said IT,
With that he hurried away. and Mrs.
Maclxus was - angry with herself she
would not listen TO Eleanor. who in
sisted that the neighbor had been en-
tirely polite and proper.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
- =-----------=
Iuxury for Legislators.

IL is pleasant, indeed, to be mem
Der of parliament on the Tonga islands.
A correspondent who recently made a
visit to the capital declares that more
is done for the comfort of lawmakers
there than any place in the world. At
eight o'clock in the morning the parlia-
mentary bell rings 10 call the deputies
TO breakfast which lasts until almost
ten o'clock. The bell sounds again at
ten o'clock, and the solons, in long
frock coats, proceed to the assembly
room. There until one o'clock the gen
tlemen discuss measures for the good
of the country. At the latter hour the
bell again summons them TO meal
this time an elaborate luncheon, with
wine or beer, as their appetites may
desire. The duties of the day are not
resumed before two o'clock, and some
times not until three. An hour later
the bell again tells the deputies that
they have served their country suffi-
GENTLY for the dav, and they leave the
assembly -room. Another meal follows.
Boat loads of provisions are brought
by the government to the islands from
New Zealand before the beginning of
the parliamentary sessions. \. I
Tribune.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

He was leaving the crowd where the
theater tickets for big engagement
were being sold. There was happy
look on his face, which suddenly van
ished He put his hand to his temple,
and then he said;
II guess I'll hunt up some quiet
place and kick myself. That's what
I'll do.
whats the natter" asked the
friend who had overtaken him.
II have been letting the calcium
light of mathematics in into the opales-
cent mist of my enthusiasm" he re-
piled.
"What do you mean?"
I've just figured IL out that I've
stood out in the snow in line for five
hours to pay extra money for theater
seat, rather than stand up for three
hours at the performance, where its
warm and comfortable.-W
Star.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
WISCONSIN STATE NEWS.
To Improre County Fairs.

The Wisconsin Agricultural Fair as
ISOLATION held its annual meeting in
Milwaukee. The association was or
yanized a year ago Its purpose is
20 improve agricultural fairs and their
arrangement by an interchange of
views and experiences Of the managers.
and all agricultural societies in the
state are eligible to membership. The
following officers were elected:
President. F.. w. Chain. waukesha; vice
presidents, J. q. Monahan. Darlington. c. W.
Harvey. Beaver Dam: secretary, II 2. McGin-
lev. Cedarburg; treasurer. T. II. Magill, Ia
Crosse; executive committee, r. c. Davis. An
tigo: ]. Il. Walker. Boscobel: Samuel Mitchell,
EikhOrn; X A. Etter. Monroe: advertising
committee. c = ANGEL. Oshkosh: f. w Cha
I'm. Waukesha. y. W. Massee. Ioutsville ID
F. Mckinley. Cedarburg; II S. We'll, Mineral
Point.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
The Isle Of Boredom.


As you sail through life take pains and steer
Away from the island that lies so near
The Isle OF Boredom, which all men fear.
The island sets up like o shelf Of rock,
But woe TO the sailor who lands at the dock
And offers the people @ chance 20 talk
Fer they talk ali night and they talk all day,
And try as you viii 20 get away,
They pin you down and they make you stay.
They talk Of the things thsy have done and
said.
They talk you awake and they talk you 10 bed.
TIL you almost wish they would talk you dead.
And the queerest thing and the one TO depiore.
About the dvellers upon that shore
Not one Of them knows that he 10 bore.
So steer away from that island shelf.
That is governed. they say. by wicked elf,
Lest y7u be a bore and not know IL yourself.
Ella w. WILCOX. IN Youths Companion
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
DUTIES OF PAGE BOYS.
Tho Kids Get Good Pay for Do
ing Little Work.
But They Are Compelled to Resign When
They Reach Their Seventeenth
Birthday-How They Increase
Their Regular Income.
lsneclal wnshlnrton | .ettnr.

The pages. the dancing little Pucks,
upon the floor of the senate, arc en-
ployed only during tho sessions of the
great deliberative body. New pages
are appointed at the commencement of
every congress, and the boys who have
grown too tall are dropped. Pages are
never removed on account of politics
tho pages have political views.
There is ore bright little fellow who
Is likely to remain in the employment
of the senate for a very long time; that
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
Remarkable Dry Land Fish.

The periopthalmus!'o ne of the most
remarkable of the several species of
dry-land fish catalogued by the natural
lists. is a native of Nauritius. lie is
only or 5 inches long, but has big
head, very prominent eyes and side fms
which bear a strong resemblance to
legs. They have the. curious habit of
leaving the water in the evening and
spending the entire night hunting the
nocturnal insects which inhabit the
muddy flats near tide water. A similar
species of New Zealand are called
running fishes" by tae natives.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
LIFE AND LOVE.
A while he nestled on her happy breast.
M. - --.-r, lite urFfh ralr,frasfr.r crTn-~

A while he nestled on her happy breast.
His new. warm LIE with palpitatiug glow.
HIS rose-tipped. fragile fingers softly pressed
To thrill and urge the fountains rearly flow.
He smiled. the angels whispered In his
sleep"
They said sand lured him 10 a safer place -
White she. in bitterness too great 70 weep.
tiazea on his cold. and white unsuswering
face.
.No. 50" she moaued. God only gives to take
Away nv idolized and Destiny all
To mock D. y bright. ssraphic ioy; 10 break
My blissfui singing heart: TO sec me fall
From heights inenable 20 depths Of woe:
Ito sbase Icy lofty pr de, when am prone
To worship human lore 10 overflow.
He scourges me, and leaves me here alone
o sacred birthday OF the years long past,
In vision rap, this mother secs a. last.
Through LHdimmed ages, radiant form ap-
pear.
A fair boy walking With the sons Of God.
Beyond earth stain. pure and sinless child.
The beatiic mounts already tro1
Reflect his heavenward footprints undefiled
He may not come to her, but she shall 90
To him; and In that wondrous realm above.
Together they shall both be taught to know
The eterna, mysteries % Life and Love.
-CorneIia ~ Nichoil in y. y. Observer
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

TO homeseekers and Florida tourists All per
sons contemplating a "trip to Florida. and all
points in the southeast, will do well before
purchasing their tickets TO write to or con-
suit Briard f. Hill, northern passenger
agent of the famous Dixie Flyer line,
which passes through Nashville, Chatta-
nooga, Marietta and Atlanta, over the
lines of the lookout Mountain route con-
sisting of the Nashville, Chattanooga and
St Louis Ry., and the Battle Field route,
the Western and Atlantic r. r., over which
are run 4 double daily service of through
Pullman Buffet and sleeping cars 10 Jack
sonyille Fla. via Macon and Triton, leaving
Chicago at ) :02 p. m, reaching Jacksonville
on the second morning at 20, thus avoid
ing all detention or delays while en- route.
Folder. maps and all information pertaining
TO this short through line will be furnished
or mailed on application To the Chicago Of
fee, 1874 5. Clark ST., Room ,.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
The Worlds MIlIIonaires.

NJ. de varigny has just published at
Paris statistical work about the
largest fortunes of the United States
and England. He SAYS In part: While
we find in the United States the largest
individual fortunes in the world, most
millionaires can be found in England.
after careful research we finl fortunes
representing value of g 100000 or
more. that is. $500 600, divided as fol-
lows among the nations: EnglaGd, 200;
United States, 100; Germany and Aus
tria. 100; France. 80; Russia, 50; India,
so: all other countries 125.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14


Of man who had hoped along for ten
years as boOlkeeper in a wholesale
house. and lad died a. bOokkeeper.
leaving an insurance policy for $1,000
in a brotherhood organization The
only child. Eleanor. was three years old
when her father died.
Mrs MaclluS invested the hulk 81
her money in her little Building next
10 the church and put stock of goods
in the front room below. II was hard
" shop. The visitor found i more
like sanctuary
The showcase contained neat rows
Of PRAYER books. catcchisuS and Bibles.
lined and clasped with gold. and also
strings If beads. each string with the
suspended cross. There were candle
sticks and crucifixes On the shelves
and displayed behind the narrow front
window. Prints of Mary and the
Child were framed and hanging against
the walls.
For seven years Mrs. Maclus had
sold books and symbols to the parish
toners. among whom she was held in
high esteem They came To her for
1vreaths and wells when the little girls
We're preparing for communion serv-
ice. and rs she was a neat seamStresS
she was often employed 10 make the
white dresses The parish priest Ia
ther Roman. sent trade to her. and she
had prospered Mrs Maclsus was
plump and good looking. bordering
upon fJrty-a woman OF cheerful dis
position. and with an object in lie.
The small earnings She put by month
after month were for Eleanor, who
was to have an academy education and
then study music. The child had
already shown aptitude rs musician.
and in herschool studies was two classes
ahead nf her years.
One day in early spring Mrs. Maclsus,
standing in her doorway. saw a new
sign across the way. II was 1T the
head of the stairway leading To- the
basement under Mr.. Leutz-s store. and
read: -. Throbcrty. Grinding and
General Repairs" The basement had
not been occupied since the cobhlers
moved ont. and the arrival Of neigh
Tor was of more than passing interest.
because the short street was mostly
given over To- cottage residences. and
changes in It's outward appearance
were unusual. She saw the new man.
whom she supposed To be the -.
Throherty' mentioned On the sign,
coming out Of the basement or diSap-
pearing into IT several times during
the day, and in a casual way she oh
served that he was ot medium height.
with face Of plain. but honest pro-
portions. and no heard. except little
strip, slightly touched with gray. in
front Of each ear. Two wagon loads
of tools and wheels were carried into
the basement, and trunk went up She
side stairway.
That evening at six o'clock. sitting
at her front window upstairs and look
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

At the forty-seventh annual meeting
of the grand encampment of Wisconsin
/. O. o. F. in Fond du Lac officers for
the ensuing year were chosen as fol-
lows:
Grand patriarch. II I. Whittier. Eau Claire;
graz high priest Oscar Smith. Whitewater.
grand senior warden, $. J. Bradford, Hui-
son; grand scribe. T. o. Holmes, BaraboO.
grand treasurer, William Humphrey, Water
town; grand representative. J. G. Clates, OAR
lington grand junior warden, +. A Bartlett,
Fond du Lac: trustees, Andrew Willard.
Beaver Dam; James Fathers, GAINESVILLE; l. F.
ThiesSen Oshkosh
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
a Prodigy.

Uncle Gabe walked around the stall
wart football player with an air of
critical curiosity; he looked him up
and down as he would have done q
horse he was about to purchase.
"Amandy!"
what is it, Gabe?"
Hes nigh onto six foot, amt hep"
Every inch of it."
weigh about one ninety odd?"
Il reckon"
"Well, football certainly does develop
'em most powerful"
Certainly fine young man"
"Man? Mandy. Prof. Bunter told
me hisse I that feller's in his fourth
wear! Talk about your oatmeal por-
ridge!'- Cleveland Plain Dealer.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

IT did not take the almshouse COM
mittee long to settle strike OF the
paupers at the Institution in Milwaukee
against doing little honest toll The
committee found that the men had no
cause to complain, except that they
were too lazy to work, and il ordered
that the whole crowd of strikers. with
the exception of one blind man, be eX-
PEELED from the institution.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

He had struggled man.ully to make
both ends keep together. but ne did not
always succeed, and there We're pain
fuI gaps in the continuity much oftener
than was pleasant. Still he was not
quite discouraged. and kept at 1t. His
wife assisted him all she could, but she
was not strong. and there were mo-
ments when she almost gave up the
struggle. II was at such time when
he came in one night with a dollar. all
the money they had had for a week.
oh. George. she cried. as he handed
il t. her. Il am 81 sorry for you. II is
50 hard To be poor.
Yes. dearic,' he replied. cheerily,
'.but its a great deal harder to get
rich. detroit Free Press
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
warrant. for state Institutions.

The state board of control finished
its regular monthly meeting for audit
ing accounts, and warrants for the
months expenses at the various state
institutions were drawn as follows:
State hospital for the insane, s5,019.ss:
northern hospital for the insane. s.. i54 90
school for che deaf. s4.60i ST. school for the
blind. 20 6q2. a. industrial school for boys, s.
sfL5s; state prison. sls.lS5s7, state public
school si961 Is; total, So s3esi
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

A Wyoming cowboy was attacked by
a large lynx the othcr day while riding
across the bad lands, near the Montana
line. The animal jumped ON the horses
back, elawing and biting both man and
horse in terrible manner. A COM
panion. who was riding at his side,
managed to kill the beast, after firing
three shots into his body.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
Briareus Had a Hundred Arms.

Nervousness has as many queer symp-
TINS. But whatever these may be, they
one and all depart in consequence of the
soothing, invigorating influence of Hos
letters Stomach Bitters, which tones the
system through the medium of thorough di-
gestion and assimilation. Tremulous nerves
soon acquire steadincss by its use. II pro
notes sleep and appetite, and fortifies the
system against disease Malaria, constipa-
ton. rheumatism and kidney troubles are
relieved by it.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

Gov. Upham has appointed the three
commissioners that are to see to the
placing of the monuments on the bat
tlefield of Chickamauga. They are
Capt. +. q. 1rimme, of Racine; Maj.
Joe Woodwork, of Milwaukee, and
John Rice, of Burlington.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
PAYMENT Of a GItt Not Auewrd.

An injunction was served upon :. f.
Chamberlain. county Treasurer Of
Langlade county, To prevent the pay
ment of $50 county order in favor of
John Parsons. cx-chairmau of the
board. The $50 order was a gift 10 the
chairman- and is in violation of the
statutes.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14
The Epworth League.

At the Epworth league state conven-
tion in Appleton, officers were elected
as follows:
President. F. W. Chain. Waukesha, re-
eleced: first vice president, w. l. smith yman.
Madison; second vice president. J. J. Schneck,
Milwaukee secretary. Rev. w. II. Balch.
MaustOn; treasurer, W. n II BTOkaw, Kau-
fauna.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1895-03-14

Colonel, what do.'you think of this
country, anyhow?"
Needs another war, sir"
"Anothel' WARP"
''Yes, sir; times arc 50 hard I've only
been able to keep half shot every day
since the Observation-Disclosures Consb.
tuition.