davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
HUMOROUS.

His First Game of Cards "Dinnis,
phwat's troomp?" ''ShamroclSs." Jaw,
yez mean clubs" "Pfwell, shelalees,
thin!"-Harper's Bazaar.
Mrs. Poore-"Ja bez. why do thew
say hush money!" Mr.. Poore-'I don t
know. Marindy, unless it is that money
| talks. N. Y. Morning journal.
! -Hiland-''My horse is the most in
telligent animal 1 know" Harket-
Go on" Hiland-"He's away I'D in
/ gee" - Pittsburgh Chronicle Tele-
! graph.
lie bangs the door the show his spite.
/ The hateful man he does not care
And she to make things even quite.
Goes right up stairs and bangs her hair.
| Cincinnati Tribune
Mrs. Turnbull-"It's too bad that
your husband cut off his flowing
beard" Mrs. Crimple-''Oh. but ne
had to DO 1t; I gave him a diamond
scarf-pin for birthday present"
-Landlady who catches Hall Bed
room cooking over his gas jet}-"Here.
here; I'll have none of that Hall
Bedroom-''You are quite right.
.
Times Herald.
Medical Examiner-"Have there
been 1any symptoms of insanity in
your family?" Applicant for Insur-
ance-"Yes. sir-er-that is. M sister
once refused man worth half a mil
lion. It'd Bits
Army Surgeon-"What's the mat
ter with you, Private Locks?" Private
Locks-"Doctor, my boot hurts my
foot SO that" Army Surgeon-"out
OF my line. Go 20 the shoemaker
Boston Transcript
Is that baby strong?" We'll.
should say So He raised the whole
family out of bed al three o'clock this
morning, and scientists say that that's
the hour when every body's strength !.
~ its lowest point"
A Stiff Breeze--C.erI5 coming iul
There's very stiff breeze blowing
around this corner BosS-''Ahe How
does il get around The corner II il i 30
stiff - Clerk Jshyiue - suppose il
bends IN the wind. - Detroit Free
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

But just then a grown-up came in.
Sic grown-up was an uncle who had
just returned to this country after a
long absence in Europe. From what
he did on this occasion I think that he
must have been lining in England, and
had not got over it. He said to the lit
tie boy:
Charles, l see you are about to read.
If you will give me nice stamp out
Of your album, will tell you story in
stead. Now this was great temptation
to the little boy. Any boy might buy
book and read story ont of it, but
here was an offer of an original story
told all for himself.
Need l tell you what the story was
that the little boys uncle told him aft
er the stamp had been delivered? Do
you want to hear the tale CT SUPPOSE
tious little boy of course of just the
the story, who entertained doubts
about revealed religion. or carried an
gleworns in his vest pocket, or did
something else that he shouldn't have
done, so that there was no health in
him, and he was properly punished in
the end? / don't think you'd care TO
hear il. l know the little boy didn't
When the clock struck half past eight
be went ND to his little room over the
hallway, and went to bed. He was
tired and low in his mind. he gener-
ally went to sleep as soon as ne got
his head on the pillow, and dreamed
Of anything he wanted to dream about
But this night he lay awake a long
time, and thought great deal He
had one stamp less in his collection,
and he had no pirates to dream about,
and he wondered why his uncle had
tGld him such a depressing story. AS
! say, / don't know whether il was
a bout religious doubt or the improper
bestowal of angleworms. but it GER
tainly was not about this particular
little boys particular favorite sin, and
he didn't see, as he said to himself, why
it was "heaved at him" And when
he awoIe the next morning he was
still thinking of il and wondering
q bout it. and he still felt tired.-H. G.
Runner. in Century.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

recruited the ranks of the always
formidable brigands that infest the
country
Fortune favored me. and despite the
terrible tales of the guide who had re-
tuctantly consented to see me through
] arrived at Conception without having
seen sign of q brigand, or, indeed, en-
rountering an adventure of any sort.
But 1 was nevertheless destined not to
leave the country without some very
vivid and almost personal experience Of
Gillian brigandage.
The road that | had traversed led
through the vast southern lands de-
voted to foreign colonization, and l
had made these colonies an especial OBJ
ject of study. The coionists are for
the most part English" but with few
exceptions they are really Scotch
people, and / was most Hospitality en-
tertained. The last, and most pleas
ant, Of these haciendas at which 1 put
up was called Albion, the new-world
home of a typical Scotch family, Hunt
err, by name. Besides the old couple
old enough in years but hale with the
almost perennial youth OF the sturdy
north-there were three sons, young
sters of twelve, seventeen and
twenty, and two daughters, enc stall
wart, muscular lassie OF TWEEN oy4two
and the other sweet, pretty child OF
fourteen or fifteen.
Albion was picturesque spot, nest
ling in coy valley cut by deep "a
vine, down which rushed an impetuous
stream. On all sides rose the slopinr
walls of a mountain amphitheater.
clad in variegated greens, beyond
which, 70 the east, there hung like
mirages in the sky the dome and spire
peaks OF the Andes. The Hunters had
been there two or three years, and the
place was already hourishing A moro
homelil1e or Arcadian spot could not be
found on the continent, and here I
spent a few days in blissful repose, IN
disturbed by any warning premonition
of the terrible tragedy that impended
over the calm Scene, in which / was 10
be a SORT OF participator after the fact
Nor did my kind entertainers seem op-
pressed by dark forebodings as they
gayiy waved good-by from their ba.-
eony, Ill aglow with sunlight and rich
southern bloom.
But, however invisible, the shadow Of
Heath was even then at hand. After
rather leisurely journey. having yet
plenty of time to catch the mail, | ar
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
severe puts new life into Them. tire

severe puts new HE into Them. tire
quires no augmentation to show that
there must be q definite reason for this
The chief reason is that English cold
is mostly damp, while in North America
it is mostly dry. There is the greatest
difference in the world between dry air
and damp air. The former is usually
air ) and simple, possessing full
quantity Of oxygen, and often charged
highly with ozone. The latter consists
OF air mixed with the vapor Of water
When the former air, fully oxygenated,
is breathed, it stimulates more power.
fully than champagne. The latter, less
oxTgenated and charged with the vapor
OF water, not only does not stimulate,
i depresses
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

the excitement round that little Jock
Hunter, the twelve-year-old '.son of Al
bion," had come in that morning and
reported that brigands had raided the
hacienda and murdered the entire fam
ily save himself, re having escaped by
the help of peon and fed to the town.
The military authorities who, for
some political or worse reason, either
favor or fear the brigands, were coldly
irresponsible TO the lads appeal for a
punitive force to be sent after the ma
xauders, and the hot-blooded citizens
tad taken the matter in their own
hands. In the plaza ! found band OF
City natives and foreigners, fully
armed, ready to start in search of the
deD7adators Needless to say that I
Joined the party, although l lost my
passa ge by that mail
Jock Hunter. apparently aged sew
eral years by his terrible experience,
went a little in advance Of the Gillian
lynchers as they rode forth, and at a
favorable moment 1 got beside him to
hear the story in its details And it
was indeed thrilling. At about three
o'clock the morning after 1 left, en- IN
usual knocking ct the front door
aroused the family. Surprising that
some be1ated traveller wished accom-
mediation, Mr.. Hunter hurriedly got on
some clothing and opened the door.
There was shout of many voices, then
a rush of feet, loud cry, the discharge
IF firearms. The boys slept upstairs,
while the parents and girls occupied
two of the three lower bedrooms, the
third of which was set apart for
strangers Bob and Jim at once rushed
down the steps, but poor little Jock
was so scared that he remained on the
landing looking down on the scene,
which was illuminated by the swinging
lamp his father must have lighted be-
fore opening the door.
As Bob and Jim reached the floor
Jock saw them quickly cut down with
Hlachettes by gang of men who were
crowding into the house. About the
same time his mother and sisters rushed
from their rooms screaming and thinly
clad in their night clothes. Then en-
Sueu d Sccuc tle Doy cOulC scarcely
master himself TO tell about, and which
must haunt him TO his dying day. Spell
bound with horror and powerless to
aid them, he beheid his dear ones
dragged and bu1feted and fought over
by those vretches as some beasts Of
prey fight over their quarry. Ere the
looting of the house began, peon who
slept in an attic above the boys room
succeeded in getting Jock out of
window into the branches Of tree, by
which means they escaped.
We found everything in and around
the hacienda in confusion, and the
place was deserted. Not peon was to
be found. The scene in the hall was
awful. The big brick floored room was
like sha,nbles. The bodies of no less
than nine brigands lay in all directions,
mute and CHASTITY witnesses to the
fierce conflict among themselves which
Jock had witnessed. To these, how
ever, we paid but passing attention, the
slaughtered family claiming our first
care. There they lay, nearly together,
six in all. stark in -daath and literally
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

"A Calumny Exploded.-"They tell
u.s." he said dreamily, that women n
ara extremely susceptible to fiattery"
I've heard that" replied his friend
well, don't you believe it. ! tried
this morning to tell my wife she was
SO good-looking she did not need new
spring dress. "-Washington Star.
"A young housekeeper who lives in
small Kentucky town had occasion
to reprimand her cool, for neglecting
her duties. well, Miss Laura, Is
been Worried" was the reply. 'Is
studyin' most 'portant question.
Tell de trute, dom know which to
get. winter cloak or a divohce."-
Harper's Drawer.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
PERSONAL AND LITERARY.

Mr.. Andree, the Swedish scientist
who proposes to seek the north pole
in balloon, is almost giant in
stature and his strength is extraordi.
nary. He is in correspondence with
NJ. de Fonville. the French aeronaut,
and contemplates going to Paris TO
have his balloon constructed there.
Gen. A. J. Pleasanton, of Philadel-
phia left one of the largest private
libraries in that citv numbering
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
THE REASONS WHY

SCOTS Emulsion of Cod-liver
Oil and Hypophosphites is 50
useful in all wasting diseases.
such as Consumption, Armenia,
Scrofula, Rheumatism, Bron-
chitis, and Marasmus and Rick
cts in children, is because it
furnishes to the depleted blood
the fattening and enriching
properties Of the oil, and to
the bones and nervous system
the plosphorescent and vitaliz-
ing properties Of the Hypophos-
phites. which together nourish
the body arrest the progress of
the disease, and commence 4
process Of repair that finally
means restored health and yfgor.
Doa't Be persuaded % accent a stbstitvfs'
sca'; S ssvaa, n, Y. Al Dggsgi..., ses. ss9 81,
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
The PEOPLES
WANT COLUMNS.

The Want Columns of Daily Paper tell
you where 1t pays 10 advertise,
II You have anything 10 BUY. SELL.
TRADE OR RENT. try these columns
fA1ABL STRICTLY IN ADVANCE.
No advertisements taken for less than 10
cents
One line advertisements charged same
rate as two lines.
friceS given Inder classified heads IN
TINS column applicable only to local ao-
.e.useinents- No foreign advertisements
taken a. above rate
answers 10 advertisements sent IN care
OF .ne EAGLE Office should be called Tor
MItnin ten days of insertion. When al
Nerusers wish rerlys forwarded 10 them
stamped envelopes must be sent.
reference 70 former advertisements
should give description and date of In
ssrUon or copy of the advertisement
should be sent.
Net responsible for advertisements given
or discontinued by telephone
CLASSIFIED advertisements will be cents
per line each Insertion: average seven
words 10 line. agate measurement.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
BRIGANDS IN CHILL
Terrible Fate Of a Scotch COlonist
and His Family.
Tho south American Republics Are Coed
Countries to Say Away Fron-A
Sight Of Horror Never to
20 Forgotten.
fsnecial Lima Perul Letter.l

The great Gillian civil war was over
President Balmaceda's rash act of de-
kpair had sealed his own fate and that
of his party, and the republic was once
more consigned to the vampire arms OF
the oligarchy OF aristocracy. My imme-
date business in the country, that OF a
war correspondent, was therefore over.
Before leaving, however, having clear
"'twcen mails" at my disposal, | de-
termined 10 see something OF the in
terror With this purpose II view l
made a dash south for Conception,
where it would be easy to catch the
next north-bound mail, regardless Of
The fact that travelling was more than
usually unsafe then. owing to the large
number OF disbanded soldiers who had
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
FALSE PRETENSES.

4 "short and Stupid Little Story That
Points a Moral.
There is very old story of a woman
who cured her husband of the habit of
profane swearing by taking to swear.
ing herself. On just the same princi.
pie l am going TO ask you to listen to a
stupid little story that shall point
moral, in order to disgust you, as far
as my skill permits me. with all stories
that point to morals-and that don't
tear sign of warning posted conspic.
uously at the entrance.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
'cepented to the floor by their OWL

,cerpented TO the floor by their own
.congealed blood.
Shall l ever forget that spectacle!
Nothing that had seen Oh the bloody
battleields of the north at all CORE
sponded to the appealing horror of it,
and for quito awhile l was completely
unnerved. Mr.. Hunters face wore still
the genial Scotch smile knew so we'll
He had died instantly, with the warm
glow Of welcome in his heart reflected
on his face; his chest was riddled with
bullets. The countenances of the two
boys showed wonder and surprise. in
so far as the ugly wounds left any
traces of expression. But the women's
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
Not the Answer She Wanted.

Hostess fwho has made unusual prep
arations for a fine dinnerHI tell
John that If he t'W bring people homo
unexpectedly TO dinner, they must take
just what we have.
Guest wishing to put her at easel
Oh. that's all right. Mrs. Buffer! Tn
en- old traveler-usad to roughing it
now and then, you know-Puck.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
The Next Best Tnina.

The robber presented his glittering
pistol.
Have you n vacancy in your book
keeping staff?' he demanded.
The president OF the bank shook his
head.
well" the outlaw sighed; he wa.
palpably chagrined) III have to be
contentad, then, with what cash you
have on hand
Stealing si7,4is.1s, he left the place.
Detroit Tribune.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

81 am satisfied that more than one
half the deaths which occur in England
are caused primarily by impaired ac-
ton of the kidneys, and the consequent
retention in the blood of the poisonous
kidney acid. Warmers Safe Cure
causes the kidneys to expel this poison,
and prevents illness from impoverish-
ed blood. 1 consequently state that L
have been able to effect more cures by
the use of Warmers Safe Cure than all
other medicines ascertainable to the
profession"
VIM. EDWARD ROBSON.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

Writing over his own signature said:
THE very marked testimonials from
college professors. and respectable ply
sicianS 20 the value of Warmers Safe
Cure greatly surprised me. Many of
these gentlemen l know, and reading
their testimony | was impelled TO pur-
chase some bottles of the Safe Cure
and analyZe them. Besides, I took
some, swallowing three times the pre-
scribed quantity. l frankly state if I
found myself the victim OF a serious
kidney trouble | should use Safe Cure.
and there is no doubt that it is one Of
those happy discoveries which Occa-
sionally bring help to suffering hu-
n12nifv -
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

Look os1t. there e-ira he ysi.,s AZ
they plossisd along ovs- thr ssas-a-
-iiere enaae~ 4 s.s-.ossa exrrylsg = sad
c1ore
80. frTT- rafrd. repiise TIE tzsg-
. ~ ssssilY a. ns bsates INTO he sss ~
Ipg es4v - f'T.a2 CESS. I've 0s;ea ne~a
:. tfs-S-- $50 y uA& 4sy s4a1 wsa2y.s
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

Tonmv-Do you say your prayer.
every night?
Jimmy-Yep.
And does your nav say hers?"
Yep"
And does your paw"
Nav Paw don't need to. It's al.
most daTl-Cht when he Gets 20 bed. -
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
An Tnasa.I o-sarr-neA

G-zz,ston a: he elabs--Cone, iest
20 hone
lie 2osnSer-HssTezlsi WAY. it's oni,
tire - sght.
Gazz.sieu- C's<u
Lc EOantsr-s2: ] woui6ar knoD
what excuse 10 maze 90 nsY sis .or
coming hcrze % sarIy.-PGc<-
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

"a personal friend. whose applica-
ton for life insurance had been reject
ed, was cured under my direction by
the use of Warmers Safe Cure. After
this demonstration of its powers. pre-
scribed il with the most satisfactory
results.
I'm large class OF ailments where
the blood is in an unhealthy state
where there is no evidence of organic
mischief, but where the general health
is depleted. the face sallow, the urine
colored, constituting the bilious con-
dition-the aG@intage gained from the
use of Warmers Safe Cure is remark
able, and l am glad TO acknowledge
and commend it thus favorably."
X. A. GUM, NJ. D.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
Cold Hui, and Cola Cares.

In England severe cold generally
kills a good many people: IN certain
parts Of North America cold still more
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FOR SALE-A No. & Rery,irz ,or tyne
winter IN good coalition VIA sci Tor
81 address II PsETIteT.' care tbs o.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

RENT THE REGINA and ANUS. your
Trends for the evening at your newt en-
tertalnment Barnes & Newcornb.
dIgs-fF
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FOR EALE-Ai ~ s. Harkes 81, bed
rom sEiTs ard sas0llue sI0ys.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FOR SALE bedroom suits. 81 ga 81
x. Swing machines. s. ard So y
chairs, - cents 70 T.. base hs..ruer lis.
book Gaze. 81. ckifouuier, rs. fne
carpets. Is and AZ. xfnGSE rhzdes an4
kitchen tables Mrs. r.. " waller
- -. EsEurO-1z Ave dr.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FOR SALT wish 20 sell a; vhelA.sfe
cost nice stock OF groceries and hars-
ware 10 god railroad town twenty miles
from wichita, Kan stock Invoices hara.
ware q so. groceries q 90 ls--- eh~.ss,
Address J. Hotson. box s. ABdzie. Kan.
aE21-zfrf
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FDR SALE-fgne hcrEe, wagon. a fan
- % store GTfgges and Ice to1es Gs,-
Ply 10 - = Douglas Ave &C.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

rived a Conception TO find the town IN
= state of confusion such as the advent
Df dozen packets would not have oc-
rasioned. On inquirinr the cause OF
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
MISCELLANEOUS

MISCELLANEOUS.
tUnder this head &c per line per day)
WE RENT the Regina for evening en-
'eitaihinehts. Barnes * Newcomb.
dlDs-fr
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FOR SALE-Frsah nnilch COW: z gals
MIX daily. J. Il. Lynch. ~ Fourth
ave cI[[E
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
AGENTS WANTED.
BUSINESS OPpORTIIEI IFS
PERSONAL.
statesmen WANTED.

WANTED-A good secondhand ruriDe
wagon Address A O. winder. city.
diSZ-4t r
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

s remedy mi" ne and
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

AXE YOU HONEST. sober industriouse
IL so. engage with US for TSqS- son a
month, S3,bD year. You can make IN
easy; six hours a day. our agents DO
not complain Of hard times Why? They
are making money selling our Perfection
Dish Washer. the only practical family
washer manufactured; washes dries and
pollshes dishes perfectly in two minutes.
no experience necessary: child of eight
operates il easily; cheap and dt,rabla.
"elSht thirteen pounds: made of anti
rust sheet steel: capacity. 100 pieces;
sIo,Vv Tor Its equal; every family wants
one You don't have TO canvass: as
soon as people know you have n FOR
sale they send for a dish washer. Each
agents territory protected; no competi-
hoh. we furnish sample tweighs SIX
pounds in nice case To lady agsnts 70
take orders with: one agent made sci, "a
irst ten days. Address for full particu-
lars Perfection Mfg. Co.. Englewood. III.
Apr. l3-3n
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
FOR EXCHANGE.
Under this head 81 per line per Hayy

TO EXCHANGE An interest in a paving
business in Central Illinois. for clear resi-
dence property in Wichita Cali or ad.
dress 40 :. Emporia- dl3s-2t q
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

NANTED-A man right away TO dig a
Wei; Ihe Buanell 4 Emo Investment Co
cidt-bt Room i0l SedgWick block
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FOR SALE-Lot on East Douglas Ave.
between Topeka and Emroria: small ma
proyements. S2.ooa. Igoxi49 II opposite Ms
SoCr1 Pacific depot. corner Second ard
Wichita streets. houses. Want an Offer.
VIII be sold cheap. VIM. Livingston.
over Fourth National bank. dllS-u.
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

HELP WANTEO--MAlE
(Cnder this head SC per line Der dsv)
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FOR SALE-2 pui,eys. finch face. S.
inches in diameter. Enquire at the gsssss
ONCE cSs Il
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20
THE PEOPLES
WANT COLUMNS.

FOR SALE-Cheap, e-seet carriage a.
harness. good. at 7lI s. Water St
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1895-04-20

FOR SALE-Tke old Fechhaimer home
stead. Water St. = nile from Doug saS.
. room house. large shade and f~uit
trees. 10 lots. Must sell: want siao. L0,ss
it UP and come and see me. K. l. Sperces
dI>-tf