Arizona weekly citizen., 1895-11-23
JOHN HENRY SNIFFEN.
Rises to tho Emergency and Goes for
 Arabells.
TUCsoN, November l9, 1895.

| Arabe1ls.
 Tccsox, November l9, 1895.
 EDITOR CITIZEN:
 After supper lsst evening Twashe
 and wiped the dishes, LIrsnge,. th
 dining room and rocked the baby {
 sleep, when Mrs. SnIffen with an air C
 superiority handed me the CITIZEN wit
 the request that read the intelligen
 and righteous ar ,icle signed "Arabella. She then cbucked me under the chin kissed the poor baby and departed l. visit her devoted chum, Mrs. Grund, thus leaving the world to darkness ant to me.
 Indeed. my better half's patr, nizine action WAS not altogether without cause | "ArabellA's" scTeed was revelation since it unlocked veritable Pandora's box of new ideas so inJergrded with subtle attacks upon the Oriental Order of Humility that tears coursed doan my cheeks and 1 wept aloud. "Alack and well-a>day," l sobbed, ''that so inno cent and harmless an organization should be so misuu derstood, passes human ken. A narrow white ribbon and burleeque at the opera house have so warped "Arabella's" judgement that she proposes to run, with others of her sex all things literary, political. econo- mic, philsntrophic and sociological. But, eaid I, ''she failed to specify the best way to capture mice and spides and things like that, hence there yet is balm in Gilead."
 If our fair correspondent only realized the wondrous amount of humility that is gradually being instilled into the members of our order, she would rejoice from the top of her head to the tips of her dainty boots. Although I was but recently initiated into the Orientals venture the assertion that if ''Arabella" possessed half the humility that l re- celved in single evening, she would make better biscuits than she does now. Did she know the beneficial effects and resultant happiness conferred upon every memb bery of Babylon Lodge No. 3, she could never, never commend to men the working of delicate mono grams on hosiery" the ''dentilation Of deDtritices" (whatever that nay meap), or the (decalomania of spatter dashes and hassacks," which ineligible expres- sions may have been called from extinct Sancrit for aught that l can tell. Instead of directing us to such pursuite, the nature of which we do not even un Gerstsn6, l respectfully invite her to closely scrutinize Nr. "Ar8bella" when he next returns from the lodge and then confess whether his actions are not in- dicative of profound weakness and sub- lime self abDegation and, therefore, preiSeworthy.
 Can she truthfully claim that the O. o. fl. has not done much towards im> proving the department of it's members. I recall an instance of one mans eccen- trioities being completely overcome since his advent into the order. Once, prior to initiation he returned home late at nigat somewhat under the influence of cold tea, and, because he could not find | the key hole of the hall hoor, devoted | more than 8n hour in 'dratting the per l son who he'd stolen it." Then instead of | retiring in the ordinary way, be careful l ly put his shoes in bed and stood him. l self outside the door to be blacked by | the hired man ID the morning. Say, | ask, can you point to single mem ber, | who ever did the like of that after init | iation?
 Has not ''Arabella's" caustic pen been | d pped in the ink of envy? No one can l resl ect the ladies mere than do-bless em!-but cur ways are not their ways because we can keep a secret. There fore We receive the great lessons of hu- mIlity through the mysteries of our or ter
 But the lamp grows dim. the baby is 4 skening, anG I think I hear Ms. Sniffen trying to open the hall door with her um brella instead of a latch key. Consequently, "Arabella" I bid thee sad GTewell.
 Yours iu all humility,
 JoUy HENRY SIXTEEN.