Pawtucket tribune. (Pawtucket, R.I.) 1890-189?, 1895-09-10
TALES 0P THE TIMES.
Obssrvstiens ef Jersey City by . Dyspsptss
New Yorker.

Providence has sct wide river betwoen
New York and Jersey City. This sepa-
rates the two most remarkable communi-
ties ON this continent by u spsce Of some
what mora than mile In actual distance.
In all other essentials tbe two places sre ~
far separated ~ the poles Jersey City IL
not even suburb of New York. II In
merely place where persons ON their way
To the suburbs have fallen by the waysidc.
Jersey City is divided into two parts
the heights and the swamps Those whom
the gods love die young OF malagia or ~
phoid from the swamps.
Some places I'm Jersey City are tougher
| than others. In the quietcr places mon
carry pistols Ira their pockets. In the
tougher localities they carry them In their
hands.
Many Jokes have been made about the
| Jersey City mosquitoes All Of them are
true The mosquitoes collect poison from
the swamps and inoculate newcomers with
it. Thanks To this, on tho homeopathic
principle, "Similia simihbus curantur,
some persons escape typhoid and malaria.
| What stranger might take for fopders on
| the trolley cars are not Tenders at all, but
mosquito catchers When the mosquito IL
struck, the mosquito catcher, with sud
den twist, tosses It's body from the track.
| More mosquitoes than citizens are killed
yearly by the trolleys.
There is great deal OF money in Jersey
City. Some Of II Ii home product not
redeemable at par or anything else. Other
branches Of this industry arc the bunko
game, the sawdust bond trick and the gold
InQ
however, that other lines Of business do
not flourish. There are faro joints and
nickel In .the.slot machines on almost ev-
cry corner. AfYable gentlemen IN checked
clothes who extend the glad hand should
be shunnod by strangers, and all invita-
tions to drink with such should be firmly
but courteously declined. They are full
of financial designs
The principal outdoor sport Is grabbing
In the bay. No visitor can escape IL. On
pain of mortally offending his host by de-
clining, he must got up at O'clock In the
morning take trolley car for some miles
and stand on float In tho blazing sun,
dangling in the water piece OF meat fas-
tened to string IN the hope that a crab
may fasten to 1t. II lucky, he may catch
dozen crabs In a mornings work, worth
In the aggregate cents. In the evening
another form of sport claims general at
tention. This is whisky poker at 10 cent
limit for o US. In the morning the
paterfamilias turns over his o US to the
children to play hare and hounds with.
Street signs are quite unknown. Visit
ors In search of any particular place will
do we'll to ask the street car official at the
ferry. He can usually direct within ten
blocks of any house Don't ask a police.
man. A citizen may tell you or endeav-
or to tell you, policeman never. 1 asked
policeman where a certain institution
was. "How nell dwi knoP" he replied
urbanely 1T amt on my beat
One of the wonders of the new world IL
the Jersey City water 1t is not blue like
the ocean or yellow like the Schuylkill riv.
er poison that Philadelphians drink. 1t il
green. Newcomers buy drinking water
imported from the country at l2 cents a
gallon. The confirmed inhabitant uses the
home supply in the natural as beverage
and, when boiled, as food. The boiled wa
ter is called poor mans soup. On the bills
of fare of cheap eating houses, where the
customers do not understand French, II
figures as consomme de microbe and il
quite popular. The bathrooms are most
remarkable. Lead plummets surround the
tub. These are for the purpose of sinking
the bather, for SO solid Is the water that a
man will float ON it like q life preserver.
This water has one advantage-namely,
that, after drinking II and bathing In II
for few weeks, one is exempt from mos
quito bites
The municipal drink is applejaok. II
costs cents a drink includinga chaser
of beer. Sometimes it Is made up into q
mixture called liberty cocktail. Only
saloons furnished with ambulance calls
serve this drink.
told Jersey City man, while he was
in New York, that thought his city the
worst place In the United States. With
the beautiful frankness characteristic OF
Jersey civilization he replied: "You' re q
liar We're you ever In Long Island CityP'
Until n few years ago Jersey City felt
the need Of locating herself within the
limits of civilization. and on all the city
bonds she issued the words, "the city OF
Jersey City, opposite New York." were
printed.
A confding foreigner once wrote book
about this country on Information furnish
cd by his friends. In one place he OBJ
serves Across the North river from New
York Ia oity of exile called Jersey City.
Persons convicted of small offonses are
transported there for brief periods, the
usual sentence being 30 days. This Is
called going up for month. New York
Sun.
| An Original Epistle-