The Opelousas courier., 1895-08-17


W. her hand she said:
This seems to be for
10 you, and l guess it's a
1t was a quart bottle. Mr.. Bowser
slowly removed the paper and then
held the bottle up to the ligR-d
shook it and observed:
Yes, he said he'd send it over this
evening. l think I'll take a dose right
away"
rs it a patent medicine?" asked Mrs.
Bowser with a tinge of sarcasm in her
tones.
Suppose it is a patent medicine" he
demanded as he bristled up and glared
at her over the bottle. For your per-
sonal benefit, however, l will say that
there is nothing patent about it. 1t is
a compound prepared in the laboratory
Of the most noted chemist in the oun
try. suppose the formula has been
copyrighted, but they don't patent
such things the same as they do wash
ing machines"
of ito"
what use! 1t is just like me to pay
three dollars for a bottle of invigorator
and then chuck it into a rat hole or
feed it to the cats, isn't it? I've felt
the need of it for the last two months. .
II didn't know that you were run
down in health, % persisted Mrs. Bowser.
.Ohs you didn't he holly ex-
claimed, as he ceased shaking the bot
tie. ''That shows what sort of a wifely
wife you are! Some wives are not blind
when a husband loses five pounds of
flesh a week and has a dozen undertake
ers itching to measure him for a coffin,
but you haven't discovered that any
thing was wrong! If the doctor was to
drop in and say that l couldn't live till
morning it would be quite a surprise to
you, wouldn't it,.
You were dancing around the other
day and telling how coltish you felt,
and SO | naturally supposed your
health was all right
81 danced around, did II / said l
felt coltish, did /! Never, Mrs. Bowser
never! Why. on earth you want to
sit there and tell such stuff and non
sense is more than / can make out!
That's your policy, however-opposi-
ton. II l was dying you'd oppose my
taking anything to restore me to
health. Are you anxious for me to die?
Do you want my life insurance on
which to cut a swell? Have you tried
mourning and found that it improved
your looks? Woman, I demand to
know why you use me thus"
In his excitement Mr.. Bowser got up
and dropped the bottle and picked it
up and walked about, with his face
very red and his toes inclined to crack.
IF You didn't buy 81 much stuff l
shouldn't say a word." explained Mrs.
Bowser, as he finally came to a halt.
you r always getting tonics and
sarsaparillas and blood purifiers and
in~vigorators and cures for this or that,
and after a dose or two you set the bot
tie away and never touch it again. /
was looking through the cupboard yes
terday and I found
THAT will do, Mrs. Bowser, that
will dor he interrupted as he waved
the bottle around his head. You
talk about my buying stuff. In the
last year ! have bought Just one bot
tie of cough medicine. Two doses of
1t reflected q cure and ] put the bottle
away. If you found ten thousand bot
ties in the cupboard you put them
there yourself. We will drop all that |
and speak Of this bottle. / am all run |
down. / have chills. fever, cold
sweats. insomnia, lassitude and gener-
al debility. Ii I go on I am a dead
q inside Of two months. If / take
this preparation / am restored to
health inside of two weeks. Shall II
take it or not??''
why, yes, Of course, il you think it
will do you any good"
ANY good! What's it for except to
do me good! I'm not taking 1t to
blow my head off, am I? A noted
physician doesn't send an i~nvigorator
ont into the world to kill off his fell
low-men, does he? The object is to in
vigorate-tone up-cure-make q man
Of q man"
Mrs. Bowser had no more to saw.
She was sorry she had said as much as
ssae had Mr.. Bowser was bound to
take that invigorator whether or no,
and the best way was to hope it would
do him good. though there wasn't a
healthier and more robust man in
town.
I'll take a dose now and another at
bedtime he said as he headed for the
basement, and II you don't see d
change in me even by tomorrow morn
ing then I'll be disappointed"
Ha Vwanf Iruprr<4. -.1J.l LI
out OF the bottle and took his dose,
and when he returned upstairs he sat
down 70 his newspaper with a self-sat-
isfed look on his face. Ten minutes
.ater he patted himself on the lower
puttotaot his vest, and exclaimed;