The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1895-10-06

NO." replied General Miles, "I do not
don't believe that men will stop fightin.
or such. reasons. The modes Of fighting
nay change, as they did in this Chinese
Japan war. The soldiers will not fgh
lose together, and battles are beccmin,
day less of the hand-to-hands struggle
hat they were in the days of Caesar. A.
o destruction the numbers killed in thu
,hinese-Japanese war do not compare will
hose of our late civil war. There wer'
many more men killed in the battle o
than there were in all the bat
les of this late struggle between Chins
md Japan" FRANK G. CARPENTER.
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
Taking No Risks.
life.
wife-John. why don't you go to sleep?
Husband-rm afraid IL might wake up tn
'aby.
A Born PuSfIfst.
Statesman.
Bacon-Mrs. Upton says her baby ha
to crawl already.
Egbert-He must be a born p~ugilist-
Where Streets Are Good.
Vow
Mr.. Citiman-What fine roadways yol
Mr.. suburb-Yes. the city contractor
haven't got this far yet.
Not Q%ualined.
Puck.
Manager-we will have to get a new ma
O pIay the tramp. Virgins missed an
,ther rehearsal to-day.
Assistant-Yes; Virgins is too lazy 70
hat part.
The Reward of Punctuality.
Boston Courier.
Yes said the business mar to tn
lergymen. Nv lost a good deal of tim
n my life
"By frittering it away. 1 supposeg"
mo; by being p%unctual to my appoint
nents."
The Basis of Compensation.
Customer-What has become Of our as
Barber-Started for himself. He is tire
IF working by the day, l suppose:
Customer thought you paid him s
a thousand words.
The Real Test.
New York Evening Sun.
JonesEThis chicken is fourteen years OLE
Smith-How a you tell the age Of
chicken?
Jones-By the teeth.
Smith-By the teeth! Chickens don't hay
my teeth.
Jones-But / lave.
Just Suited Him.
philadelphia Record.
Noosriter-Isn't this c~hangeable weathe
distressing?
Hammphat-I rather enjoy It, You Sc
grown to expect IL In my business.
How sop
Wen. We generally have a frost on tn
night, and the papers roast US !
he morning"
ssThe Art of Living with Others"
Puck.
HE wants to board and his wife wan;
% 60 10 housekeeping"
"well. he's offered to compromise wit
How"
keeping"
The Gallant Grocer.
New York Weekly.
Mrs. Rnks-My husband did not like tina
ca you sent US last.
Grocer (politely)-Did you like II, mad
me-?
Mrs. Binks-Yes. 1 liked ii.
Grocer Ito clerk)-Jamesi Send Mrs
Binks another pound or the same tea Sn
last. Anything else, madame?
The Cause OF the Trouble.
Puck.
Little Clarence shouldn't think Adar
enjoy himself ver- well. up there /
heaven.
Mrs. Callipers-Why so, dear?
Little Clarence-Why, / should think tina
he first thing every man who a &c
nto trouble here on earth would do ate
to- heaven would be to unit Adar
ID and lick him.
Very Suspicious.
New York Weekly.
Gentleman Ton railway train)HHow di
his accident happen?
Conductor-Some one pulled the air-brak
ord and stopped the train. and the sec
md section ran into us 1t viii take nv
hours 10 clear the track SO we can Z
ahead.
Gentleman-Ffve hours, 1 was TO be MAJ
He'd to-day.
Conductor Ga married man)-Say, Are yo
scalawag that stopped the train?
Getting Even.
Detroit Free Press
81 utterly refuse your proposition O
marriage! Do 1 not make myself plain?