Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-03-28
WOES OF A BRIDEGROOM.
Heartrending Things That Conspire Co
Make u Young Man Miserable.

Heartrending Things That Copspire to
Make n Young Man Miserable.
"There are discomforts connected with
getting married that few people know any
thing about, except the bridegrooms," re-
marked u young New Yorker who had re-
Gently gone through the experience
u did not suppose the honeymoon period
had any drawb backs" ventured the bach
elor.
well, it has some curious incdentals
that never dreamed of. After the public
announcements of the date of my wedding
they appeared in most of the city papers
i began to receive steady stream of cir
eulars. There were circulars from haber-
dashers, shoe stores and florists, and two
applications from real estate agents to
show flats and three days before my we'd
ding arrived printed slip, ostensibly =
cutting from newspaper. This was truly
a curiosity.
'It was headed '-t to Marry as though
all New York were agog at my approach7
ing ceremony, and then under the irn4
portant line by telegraph followed a full
some account of myself. My brief and un-
eventful career was padded up to heroic
size; every phase of it that could appeal to
vanity was dwelt upon, and just as some
iioot sSltttbit Wtlt btlDB ulilut
about my personal appearance, the arti-
clo' had been clipped, and | was informed
by an accompanying circular that could
obtain copies of the paper, one or any num-
ber, by sending two dollars to n certain box
at the New York postofliee
"Of course ignored this tricky scheme,
though as n device for bleeding the vain it
was most interesting, but ON my return to
New York after the affair was all over my
real woes began. The legitimate press as
sociations kindly informed me that there
were fourteen notices of my marriage, and
that could have them all for considera-
tion.
II devoted my first hour after returning
to business to this class of applicants
when n visitor was announced. He turned
out to be an insurance agent, and for five
days l talked insurance, read insurance,
dreamed insurance. The elevator brought
agents in person, the mail brought their
letters. | even received two kilograms on
the subject From one company alone
came four different canvassers. MY busi-
ness was interrupted and my patience was
exhausted. Late on the sixth day of this
plague, when was in no mood for trifling,
the door of my outer office opened, and
small man with red whiskers and specta-
cles came slowly in.
"'It's no use to come in any farther
called to him. 4 know your company.
There have been four other men ahead of
you, so it's no use. There's an elevator in
the hail. You can ride down in it free,
my friend, but if you say insurance around
here Pll give you chance to go down the
stairs free-ride down to-
81 stopped here to draw breath, and the
redheaded man said
"'You was married last month";?
"'I was. Now, ask my age suggested,
and compute my chances of life.'
"'Well, you married my niece contin-
ued the redheaded man. I've just been
calling at your house, and she sent me
down to surprise you. l reckon it's the
other way, and now I'll go out and take
lat free elevator
II tried to apologize and explain" added
the unfortunate bridegroom sadly, "but
twas no use; he went''- New York Trib-
une.