The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1894-12-08
A CURE FOR BORES.

" hC4p ING oN"
''Financial?'' asked Sommers, with q
slight contracting Of his eyebrows.
"Oh, no Worse than that a good
deal"
ST didn't know anything could be
worse in these panicky times. What is
it?'' ....-..
at have a friend said Bremner, ''or
q man who thinks himself my friend,
and whom for certain reasons I wish
to shake off, but he refuses to be shaken.
Now, you are q r~esourceful man and
may be able to give me o hint. I have
tried everything with Snaggs-every-
thing short Of positive insult-and all
TO no purpose"
what is the matter with him?'' ask
ed Sommers-
1.-THE matter is this: He has q boy 2
years old or whereabouts, and he always
persists i'm talking about the lad-in
fact, he can't talk of anything else
and imagines every n as deeply inter
ested as himself. / have nothing at all
against the boy. He is a good enough,
commonplace little fellow, like all the
rest of them. ] never see any difference
i'm boys myself. They all seem equally
Objectionable. But Snaggs ONE to our
house, sits down and talks about his
boy until I am nearly driven crazy. I
hope you can suggest something for my
relief"
81 suggest" said Sommers, THAT
YOU take Snaggs to the state of Michi-
gan, q. s. A., and kill him"
"Why to Michigan" queried Brem-
ner.
"Oh, simply because they don't hang
for murder there, and any penalty short
of hanging should be cheerfully borne
to get rid of a man like Snaggs."
81 didn't know you were acquainted
with him." said Bremner excitedly.
'I'm not, but I'm afflicted in the
same way myself"
Nonsense! p cried Bremner. "IneveI
even heard you mention Your children. y
IT mean that I am afflicted with
friend like Snaggs. It's a daughter in
his case. His name is Gregsby. I'm
even worse off than you are, for this
only daughter is but 5 years old. You
are two years ahead of me. BY and by
the boy will reach years of discretion.
and he viii get there quicker than
Gregsby's girl"
II don't know about that" Bremnel
replied gloomily. Girls grow up sc
much faster than boys do"
"But they never reach years of dis
erection, you know"
81 don't believe any son of Snaggs
will either. The boys father hasn't, al
any rate. But I say, Sommers, an idea
strikes me. Why not introduce Snaggs
and Gregsby to each other?"
THAT wouldn't be a bad plan" re
piled Sommers cheerfully, land the1
we. might bet IN them. I'll back In!
man to be the greater bore"
'There wouldn't be any use in bet
ting" said Bremner, for if your ma
is as bad as mine it could only end III
draw"
Bring your man round, and wei
test the case"
Shall l bring Snaggs to your hous
tomorrow night then?' asked Bremner
"Yes, and if you're in for a bet In
your victim. l have great faith ii
Gregsby and would like to have a littl
stake ON him."
Its a serious subject with me, re
piled Bremner.
"Oh, very well, then, I'll expect yo
tomorrow night about s o'clock, thong
/ suspect your man is not half SO capa
BILE a bore as mine"
1t was a few minutes before s o'cloc
when Gregsby pressed the electric but
ton at the Sommers residence. Sommel
heard him talking to Mrs. Sommers i
the hall, saying: "Oh, yes, thank yor
she is quite well. I'll tell you som,
thing funny that she said today to hi
mother"
Sommers groaned and helped himse
to a quantity Of the stimulant provide
for his guests. The next moment Greg
by appeared. smiling, ndSommers gree
ed him with we'll feigned cordiality.
Very soon the bell rang again, and
few minutes after Bremner was intr
ducing Snaggs to the two sitting in ii
smoking room.
"Beastly weather this, said GregsI
to the newcomers. IT don't mind Il
weather myself, out when q man h
children he is compelled to think Of it.
Have you children" asked Snagq
with apparent interest. 1--WE a lit
boy myself, but he doesn't mind q
weather in the least"
II shouldn't say children" repli
Gregsby. IT have one little girl, a
she Is only s years old, but wonderful
knowing for her age, and this weati
III 80 bad that she misses her walk WI
her mamma. We never trust her Wi
out alnurse, you know
was saying" broke in Snag
that I have q little boy myself. He
4, and he goes out in all sorts Of wea
Ell. + don't helieyein coddling childr,
And that reminds me Of q clever thi
ne said 10 me this morning. He alwl