West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1894-02-15
CHAPTER XIV.

In the grocery and took handful OF
dried apples. Tho boy ato dried appl,
and then mads up a terrible face, and
the grocery man asked him whit no was
trying TO do with his face. Tho boy
caught his breath and then said:
Say. don't You know any better than
TO keep dried apples where boy cau get
hold OF them when he has got the
mumpsl You will kill some boy vet by
such dunn carelessness. I thought these
were sweet dried apples, but they arc
sour as boarding house keeper, and
they make mo tired. Didn't you ever
have the munps? Gosh, but don't Il
hurt thought You have got 90 be darn
careful when you have tho mumps, and
not go out bob shedding or skating. or
yoc will have your neck swell up bigRern
n milk pail Pa says he had tho inumps
once when ho was a boy and II broke
him all mp.
We'll, never mind tho mumps, how
about your Pa spreeing it? Try one of
those pickles In the jar there, won't yous
1 always like TO have n boy enjoy HIM
self when he comes to SEQ me-" said the
grocery man, winlling to man who was
hlling an old fashioned tim box with to-
bacco out of the pail, who winled back,
as much us to say. If that boy eats a
pickle on top of them mumps, we will
have circus sure
"You can't play no pickle on me, not
when have the mumps. Ma passed the
pickles TO me this morning, and took
one mouthful and like to had the lock-
jaw. But Ma didn't do 1t on purpose. |
guess She never had the mumps and
didn't know how discouraging pickle
Is. Darn IL didn't feel as though | had
been struck in the butt of the ear with n
brick. But about PA. He hns beon
fuller'n goose ever since New Years
day. | think it's wrong for women to
tempt feeble minded persons with liquor
on New Years. Now. me and my chum
we can take n drink and then let it alone.
Wa have got brain. and know when wa
have got enough. but Pm when he gets
to going don't ever stop until he gets so
sick that be can't keep his stummick i'm
side of hisself. II is getting 70 they look
TO me to brace P,, up every time he gets
on tear. and ! guess fixed him this
time so ho will never touch liquor again.
| scared him so his bald head turned
gray in single night
"What under the heavens have Won
done TO him nowr' says the grocery man
in astonishment. II hope you haven't
done anything you will regret In after
years.
"Regret nothing!" said the boy MS ho
turned the lid OF tho cheesobox back
and took the knife and sliced off piece
OF cheese and took few crackers out of
barrel and 90 = soapbox by
tie stove. "You SEQ, Ma was annoyed TO
death with Pa. He would como homo
full when che had company and lay
down on the sofa and snore, and ho
would smell like distillery. 1t hurt
me to SEQ Ma cry, and told her would
break Pa of drinking if she would let
me, and che said If / would promise not
to hurt Pa TO go ahead, and / promised
not to. Then | got my chum and an
other boy--quite big boy--to help and
Pa is all right. We went down 20 the
place where they sell arms and legs to
folks who have served in the army. or -
sawmill, or n thrasbing machine and
lost their limbs, and we borried some
arms and legs and fixed up dissocting
rooin.
owe fixed long table In the base
ment big enough to lay Pa out on, You
know, and then we got false whislscrs
and mustaches, and when Pa came in
the house drunk and laid down on the
sofa and got TO sleep We took him and
laid him out on the table and took somo
trunk straps and surcingle and strapped
him down TO the table. Ho slept right
along all through It,, and we had another
table with false arms and leSs on, and
wo rolled up our sleeves and smoked
pipes just like read that medical stu
dents do when they cut up man. Well,
you'd died 10 see Pa look mt us when
he woke mp. I saw him open his eyes,
and then we began 20 talk about cutting
mp dead mon. We put hickory nuts in
our mouths so our voices would sound
different, 80 he wouldn't know us. and /
was telling tho other boys about what a
timo we had cutting up the last man we
bought l said be was awful tough. and
when we had got his legs OF and had
taken out his brain his friends came 10
the dissectiDg room and claimed the
body, aud We had to give 1t mp, but
utAFNA Ait tFEHs
~ looked at Pa on tho table. and he be.
gan 70 turn pale, and he squirmed around
70 get up, but found no WAS fast. had
pulled his shirt up under his arms while
ne was asleep, aud ns he began to move
/ took on icicle. aud in tho dim light Of
the candles that were sitting on tho
table IN beer bottles drew tho icicle
across Pas stnmmick and said TO my
chum, Doc. ! guess wo had better cul
open this old duffor and 500 II he died
from inflammation Of the stummics
from hard drinking. as tho coroner SID
be did Pa shuddered all over wber he
felt the icicle going over his bare STUN.
mick, and ho said: For Gods sake. gen.
flemen. what docs this mean? am moi
dead.
Tho other boys looked at Pa with
asionishmont. and said Wen. W.
bought you for dead. and tho coroner'i
jury said you wtre dead and by tbs
eternal We ain't gong 20 be fooled out Of
e fcrrfe WHEN we huv ono "a me-