River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-01-18
PITH AND POINT.
When people are hired to be good
they will stop as soon as the pay stops.
Rams Horn.

When people are hired to be good
they viii stop as soon as the pay stops.
Rams Horn.
How do you know when the first
of the month comes around? You say
! you have no calendar" mo, but
have a tailor. Harlem Life.
Lady lin curio store) Does this
clock go?" Dealer-''Ah, madam, am
so sorry! but that clock is six hundred
years old. 1t has already went"
~ know I'm little irritable, John,
but if had TO live my life again, I'D
marry you just the same" HIN!
have my doubts about it."-Judy.
$50 he worked pretty hard at
school this year?" well, should say
so. You ought to see the perfectly
magnificent suit of hair he has. I'm
ter-0cean.
Mrs. Twickenham-- children are
such innocent little things" Won
Blumer-'I don't know about that
My last baby taught me how to swear. +"
N. Y. Herald.
"A Slight Miscalculation.
Would you like to see the little fell
low, sir?" Bixby-"Fellowl Why, the
nurse told me it was a girl" Doctor
"She meant the other one. N. Y. Sun
An Empty Compliment. - Willy
Wilt-"That new chophouse is on a
pretty magni ficent scale" Young
Chasehem-"H SOP" Willy Wilt
-Four tables for every customer
Puck.
AT the Thea r.-Will-"Say,J Jack,
how much did you pay for these
seats?" Jaclx-''S;x dollars and half. :"
Will-"Well, next time let's save our
money and go to a milliners opening g"
Boston Beacon.
"A Difficult Problem. -DeclSer--"So
you didn't get TO Chicago after alp"
Hecker-"No; you see ] was SO busy
figuring on the cheapest way to go
that l didn't get the rates down fine
until after the fair was over. Truth.
"A Bad Game. -IIarvey-"I played
little game of draw at my best girls
house last night" Jim-',No? With
whom?" Harvey-"With her father
lie drew me to the front door and
got the rake-off from there to the front
gate. detroit Free Press
-Algy straightforward you veal
ly wecommend person, me for in
stance, to-aw-think twice before
speaking once?" Miss Huntington
"Why, no, Mr.. Softleigh. You don't
deem me so cruel as to want to strike
you dumb, hope. buffalo Courier.
Sympathetic WHAT are you read
ing, johnny" inquired the boys ia
Their. "A sea story, about a man who
was wrecked on cape" Read it
aloud. Johnny. l can sympIthize with
him. l have just been wrecked on a
seal-skin one myself. - Washington
Star.
Little Johnny-"Mrs. TallSemdown
paid big compliment to me to-day"
Mother-"Did she really? Well, there's
no denying that woman has sense.
What did she say?" Little Johnny
"She said she didut see how YOU came
to have such nice little boy as am. ("
-Tit-Bits.
Whether the Washington police
man knew the member of congress or
not, when he met him on the street at
a. IN. slightly under the influence"
does not appear, for a Washington
policeman doesn't always know every
thing; but be that as it may, when he
saw the man at that hour in that CON
dition he approached him. Say, Of
ficer, what time is itP" inquired the
NJ. c., steadying himself by hitching
post. Time for decent people to be
I ~ bed" responded the officer gruffiy.
Don't be insolent, sir" commanded
the NJ. C. sticking his chest out like a
turkey gobbler's, I'm a member of
congress" ''0h," laughed the officer
incredulously, ''then it isn't time for
you to be in bed. Good morning" and
he went across the street to wait until