The Coconino weekly sun., 1894-05-24
UNWELCOME CALLERS.
Women, Young and Old, Who Want Department Clerkships.
They Are Even More Persistent Than Male Ofice-Seekers-A Good Joke on Robert Porter-In Quest
 of "Inf1uence."
Especial Washington Letter. l

The most persistent and therefore the most disagreeable office-seekers are women. When lady makes up her mind that she needs an office, and ought to have it, she also, by uncon- scious cerebration, makes up her mind to worry the life out of poor con- gressman, almost as certainly and ef- fectively as terrier worries the life | out of rat. The census office has naturally been most besiegcd by wom- en place-hunters ever since it was or ganized, because its employees are not appointed under the civil-service law. It has been observed that all persons | in petticoats have horror of competi- tive examinations, Arithmetic is hopeless puzzle to nearly all applicants O. their sex. But I have noticed that in nearly every case where it was real ly desired by influential men the ex- aminations were successfully passed. That is to say, if the regular examina- tion was failure, a special ''expert" examination was given, and the appli- cant always passed it.
 The force of the census office was re- duced upon several occasions, and it will be soon again. Such occurrences have been invariably followed by a batch of marriages. Of course these matches have been the result of some love-making; but when l have read | the wedding notices in the news papers the thought has come to me, whether it be right or not, that the weddings have been brought about more by reason of necessity on the part of the girls, than for real, deep-seated love. In such an event, ninety-nine per cent. of tho marriages are but the commencement of suits for divorce, or of miserable lives.
 Of course, where so many hundreds of young people have been thrown to- gethcr some sincere attachments are bound to follow; but, while indulging | in filtration with the male clerks, the girls not uncommonly would keep on the lookout for the better opportunities in the matrimonial field. In numerous | instances they would have several such office beaux dangling while wait ing for something more eligible to turn up. This plan they could afford to pursue so long as they were rendered independent by their own employment; but when discharge seemed imminent they would promptly make selection from the available husbands at hand. And it IS fair to presume that some of those marriages have turned out well. When Hon. Robert F. Porter was superintendent of the census good story was told on him. It seemed that on one occasion Superintendent Porter received the resignation of a girl who joyfully informed him that she was going away to be married. She was anxious that he should give her a letter of commendation, which he did very amiably, notwithstanding the fact that she had not been capable clerk. Subsequently, her husband turned out brute, and within three months she
 'ot divorce in Chicago. Then she came back to Washington and com pclled the reluctant Mir. Porter, on the strength of his own letter, to take her into service again. Moreover, she held her place long after Porter ceased to be superintendent; for she placed his letter on file among her papers of indorsement, and Porter's successor would not disturb her. As an act of official courtesy, he could hot very well afford to discharge the only lady who had Porter's recommendation on file, although she was notably in- competent.
 The ladies who come to Washington seeking office invariably make the plea of poverty. When one of them reaches the capitol and sends her card in to see her representative, she Is loaded with speech which she fires at the states man as soon as he responds to her sum- mons. She says: Here I am, strand ed haven't money to buy meal of victuals, or to get place to sleep to- night. You must get me place right away" The stories of these office seekers may be true, and usually they are true. Either they arc lone and lorn or else they have large families wholly dependent on them for support. Their political honesty is not of the highest. Whichever party is in power they are on that side. At least half a dozen female applicants for places in the treasury, after trying to fascinate Secretary Carlisle with smiles and finery, have dressed themselves ir mourning and come back few days later in tears. Meanwhile, according to their plea, they have lost their hus bands or fathers, and are thus deprived of means.
 One young lady brought congress man with her. to persuade Mr. Carlisle