Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-04-12
Mr.. Grumble's Cure.

Henry Grumble deserved MS nSnie-
He grumbled- at the way his wife man
aged the household; he growled over
the service of his meals and snarled
about the way his wife attended to
his clothing and always compliance
that the baby cried incessantly.
Mrs. Grumble's brother Tom decij-
ed that it was time to stop this state
of affairs, and one night Mr.. Grumble
came home and encountered an old
man whom his wife introduced as
Uncle TOmpkins. Now, this hitherto
unheard of uncle proved himself ex-
tremely peevish and irascible from
the start.
Mr.. Grumble silently devoured his
supper, secretly wondering how long
Uncle Tompkins meant to stay. No
sooner was the table cleared than the
irascible old gentleman began again.
"Grumble," said he, Il wish you'd
stop that creaking Of your chair. Ny
nerves are so weak, and if you keep
your children up stairs their racket
wouldn't disturb me so much. lreally
don't know how I am going to stand
that baby's noise.
Il do not think it is very noisy
baby" said Mr.. Grumble meekly.
Its teeth are very painful at present
Mrs. Grumble, who was pOking the
fire, in accordance with her uncle's
petulant request, said nothing, but
smiled quietly to hear her husband
e1tenuate the baby's sins.
well, remarked Uncle TOmPkins'
"all babies are noisy And by the
way, Grumble, l wish you would oil
the hinges Of that squeaklng door.
And l don't like the smell Of that ge-
ranium in the window. Hallos You
haven't any top button on your shirt
front l hope my niece ism t careless
wife !"
Not at all, sir, said Mr. Grumble,
neryously, but the care of her child
and housekeeping duties absOrbs
great deal of her time. The instant
she finds leisure she will look to my
clothes y
Il don't see how woman can spend
her whole time keeping house and
looking after a pack Of children, OBJ
served Uncle Tompkins mere lulou'Iy.
About 10 o'clock the old gentIeman
was ushered to the spare room, accom-
panied by a procession OF medicine
vials, tub Of hot water, wooIen
dressing robes and heated blankets
for his feet, and his absence occasioned
very general relief.
What an insuferable old dufier
that isl" exclaimed Mr.. GrumbIe,
throwing himself, with sigh of sat
isfaction, into his favorlte seat once
more. MY dear Bessie, how could
you endure his fault fnding?'
Lam accustomed to that, Henry,
1t is a lesson that most married women
are obliged to learn, replied Mrs.
Grumble, with a slight sigh.
Her husband pricked up his ears a
little uneasily. Accustomed to it
What did she mean2
1t was not impossible-it could not
be possible-that he was like that
odious old Uncle Tompkins. And
vet he wished Bessie had not spoken
in that way. Somehow it made him
feel very uncomfortable. Three days
passed away, Uncle TOmpkins growing
more intolerable the whole time
while Mr.. Grumble improved the oc'
casion by making sort Of looking
glass of that worthy old gentleman.
Upon my-wOrd," he said to him
self. 81 must have made perfect nul'
sance of myself all these years Why
didn't somebody tell me Of it?'
At length Uncle TOmpkins wen
away, flannel robe, medicine bottl'
and all, and on the evening OF tn
same day Tom Carlton arrived from
a temporary absence, nobody knew
where.
$50 uncle has been visiting your
he said gayly to Mr. Grumble.
"Yes, said the latter, with a singh
grimace.
What sort Of looking man is heY
Mr.. Grumble was silent for mo
J ment.
do you know" he exclaimed
bursting into a perPleIed laugh, .
couldn't describe single feature
his face. He was always envelopec
like an Egyptian mummy, in a "l
handkerchief, something Like that on
> you have in your hand.
"The most intolerable fault-hnd'