Middletown transcript., 1894-01-13
OLD PIDE!!.

ne 16eo1oaicsa student'B Mind Be
comes Diverted by 10 Attenslon
of the school Aasfexs Cousin.
Uxxxz eoorr Well they kindaE
Axed Il up some how 80 / had 70 wslk home
With I'D schulz master's kusin from church.
Ny goshI she was nice gal, strate as e
tamrod, and had on q nice red calico dres
just below her knees, with blue padies
ruled alkround, har cut short. 9 bran new
Kossooth hat with fantail pigeon on one
side. axed her "how old am your she
smiled and sed sixteen, there want no paint
nor powder them days and you kuld purity
well guess = gals age, sed to her ARE you
going to keep that dress for your second
welding, that made her kind o. smile agin.
s. didn't say nothin hut couldn't keep from
thinkun she wus about mas age. The
schule masters wife met US at the dore and
.sed aAlfonzy. Alfcnzy, axe your friend
-, 10 went In. There was q lott other
gals in there; soon va wus kalled out into
the dining room, the schule masteE axed
me to grace the table. sesi
The childrcn OF Israel axed for bred
Ana the good Lord He give them manan,
The schule masters vito she wanted COOK
{ Ana the devil give her Hannah.
The gals had got up kind of benefit to
buy 1 krown for the Highwaian Queen in
the church that mite; they had herd about
s0ld Pidea 50 they wanted her and me in
the plsy, 80 / got Sim to help tote her down
u the church. THnever forgive Lord for
blatin all along the street We flied q
kurtin around for legs snd set told pide"
on top. unbottomed in 'front.' OF the fatform,
soon ali was ready for the fust act. The
bin was tapped and the gals all kun out
saressed in white, chawing calomus roote,
with sweet billy in each bosom and sung
eshere wus three crows set on . tree then
they chnsed their partners and We all
marched round a may pole snd holered
aquack, quack. quack 2 Then the kurtin
dropped In the second act the boys and gals
all kum cut and plaid spnssy wants corner
.askalf ID the ring and kiss me quick" In
the Isl md closing act they sprinkled some
bIus ma red powder al around "pide" and
put r1s under her with string to the led,
the c6xtun bloed out the taller dips and the
pr6ocber KUN out and sed, .sladies and
fentlonen, the gratest drama of the age is
4h5ut to be performed, Dryton, Neptunes
lSxofite offspring, will rise out of a sea OF
6fe blowing his fish horn" They set off
the powder and kud you sene me kumin
up throu old ''pide" suspended by cord
fastened to the sect of my trowsers, blowing
that horn during the encorel Ny bearer
lost his equaliberam, old Sam grasped the
ide and Beaver tuck up election to pre-
cure for the star of the evening pair of
red galases, but tel you it wus grand hit,
every body wus happy and it wuz the con-
dition precedent that returned Helibalue's
grandmother to the Hawaiian thrown. I've
ofen thunk to myself if Harrison had been
president then that niger would never
worn that krown. Poor darkies, they have
"a hard time some how, fur when Eve had
Ham hit made Adam so mad he made him
hoe the garden of Eden and sleep in the
stable iorf.
After the performance went home with
A1fonzy and she kinder laid her he'd on my
should in the hall an sed don't you think
hit better to marry young?" give her q
tap on the cheek and ses ''oh you sweet
damsei you have akountenance like dying
kali.
Duty required tina. / should apply myself
to my steadies: Poor Sam. Harrington, !
we'll remember his bright countenance and
answering friendship, he wus the britest
star aft all in the considerations of my aca-
demic associations. His noble hart was
always open. be looked not mournful upon
the past wisely improved the present. and
went fourth to meet the shadoway future
without fear and manly hart, he stands
out to-day the inimitable emulation for all
his college companions. like the withering
rose order perfumes she skies, SO in his
death his influences and example permeats
the minds Of al who knew him, he,liyed,
For the cause that n6eds hssistance.
For the wrongs thn5 ueed xeststance,
/ 1or the tuture - fhes distance. =
And what goed at ~ could do.
From yuur Nefew,
Scrabble x Roads.