Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1894-06-23
CURIOUS BASE BALL ENGLISH.
Expressions Which Might Puzxie
Shakespeare and Even Authors of
This Day.

Expressions Which Might Pua.ie
Shakespeare and Even Authors of
This Day.
From the New York Tribune
Base ball English, as she Is wrote for the
edifcation of the public. is luridly pictur-
esque. The writer used to go to base bail
games. Later he became SO busy that he
could not go. but he read accounts of the
games with a certain amount Of pleasure
and instruction. Finally he ceased to read
about the green diamond sport" The other
day, however. he went UP to the polo
grounds to court his old love. 1t was a
prettiiy play ed game and he enjoyed it.
With his interest still keen he glanced over
a published account of the same game and
found that his impressions of 1t. formed on
the grounds. were entirely wrong. In the
first place. players who were supposed to
have family names hadn't any such useless
things. In the paper one was Midget
another was "Spud." There was Fatty"
with Skeleton" to keep him company, &c.
Family names. like pedgrees 1t seems. do
not make base ball players.
The first man who came to the bat did not
make a base hit He 'walloped out a sin
gle" The next did not do anything SO tame
and antique as to send a ny to center field
or fly out He got real demoniac and fun
COED to center" The center fielder wasn't q
bit terrified. either. for he Rugged the
musty fly" What the innocent lover Of
base ball had taken for a three-base hit was
nothing Of the kind. Such conventional
things are not allowed on the grounds. 1t
was worse than crying twins. 1t was q
''whistling triplet.''
A fielder did not catch q high ny. He
connected with a balloon fly" and the
young man who was rash enough to follow
up this phenomenon was not put out at first
base; he arranged his own funeral and died
IN easy death at first" Catching has gone
out OF fashion entirely. When a player
catches ball he IL fined by the umpire for
insulting the intelligence OF the spectators
He clasps high one." or "hauls In q n.y."
or pulls a throw down."
1t seems that at this game, according to
the published report. an active player had
wings on his heels and "tabasco sauce In
his arms Yet he was perfectly tame and
tractable when not 'larruping scrapers," or
Shaping out dandy singles" or "lacins an
easy one or ''siashing out a peach" There
was nice-appearing young man in one Of
the teams. who did not look as II he would
harm q ny, but he was really fiend incar-
nate, for he deliberately and in cold blood
unclaimed q cyclone with his willow and
tore out the ground back of center field"
1t isn't safe to judge by appearances. One
player seemed to Jog along to first base
when the umpire gave him his base on balls.
But the base bali Shakespeare denies this
malicious charge. He says that he 'ambled
to the bag" This same man did not steal
second base; he 'pilfered it." Altogether he
was pretty disreputable fellow, for he also
robbed the visitors of third" His career Of
crime was checked, however, for when he
tried to embezzie the plate he was
mailed" though to what Is not on record
The players all had peculiar gaits. Some
OF them galloped, some of them romped
some OF them cantered some of them scam
pered, some Of them .'piked to second" some
OF them "trotted a heat" One man even
got SO mixed up in his easons that, though
1t was a. hot as fophet, he "tobogganed to
third. But not a soul of them ever walked
or ram one man, evidently Jealous of the
forms Of locomotion possessed by his broth
ers in deformity, "kangarooed to second"
A batsman can do lots Of things that the
unsophisticated person would never dream
OF. ON this day one man. who had three
strikes called on him, cut the plate with
three called balls" Another flied softly"
and Denny froze 1t sweetly." So, In spite
OF the stabbing and cutting and slashing,
there is sometimes rural gentleness A man
Who was excited sent a sizzling grounder
rafting through the legs" of somebody, and
another, who was politeness itself, Tanned
the warm air" One player sent a bifrer
past second, and a rival POPPED q mushy
one abaft first" Nothing happened, though
to tine lee scuppers. Speaking of batsmen
none of them used a bat. Only buffers"
SO tar forget themselves as to play base ball
Win d pat anu Jail Inese men welded
the ash and willow handles and "toyed
with the sphere"
Players never get put out In these DAYS
The methods of disposing of them vary
Some are put to sleep. some are allowed to
languish in solitude and some are tortured
to death. In this game. SO wildly described,
one man "groped vainly for the elusive" and
played dead on the bench" One was cop
pered at FIRST" and another was .cinched a 4
the plate;" still another expired in an
guish" at first. ard an unoffending but un-
popular youth was "smothered to death at
second"
There Is a suspicion on the part Of tender
hearted people that foot ball Is a rough
game. As for base ball. the players only
wallop, cut, larrup, basic, hug. squeeze, nip,
freeze, slap, pike. lace, cinch, slash, bifr.
punch. pound scrape, toboggan, smother,
choke and strangle
At least this Is base ball as set down by
III