davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

A Mean Fellow.-Clara-"Of all mean,
selfish, despicable creatures, think Mr.. Hug
gem is the worst" Dora-'''Why, what has
he done?" Clara-"When / refused him, he
did not commit suicide, or go to a mountain
cave, or anything. He's engaged to Igiri
hate"
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06
The Last Resource.

Mrs. Gramercy-The weather is 50
stormy I don't think we'll have any
visitors to-day. Miss Gramercy-
Well, ma, I can't stand such ennut
for a whole day. / intend to lie down
and send for the doctor. or.-Judge
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

He--I shall never marry until /
Hnd q woman who is my direct OPP
posite. She (encouragingiYl Well,
Dir. Duffer. there are numbers OF
bright. intelligent girls in this neigh.
borhood. It'd Bits.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Should be kept at stables and stock yards
Salvation Oil is the best friend not only OF
man, but of dumb beasts as well. Fer swelled
joints, strained tendons, old sores,t saddle
gals, and wounds of all kinds there is no
per bottle.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

A Slow Appetite doing the cary
ing)-"Are you hungry today"
Little Dick-"No, sir: only small piece
please. guess won't be hungry for half
an hour"
Father-"We'll be about through then.
Little Dick-"A1 'cept the pudding
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06
Why Shouldn't She?

Miss De Vere-The dude with the
red hair has proposed to that Slen-
derry girl. Dolly Danzer-I don't
wonder. She's thin enough to make
match. Music and Drama
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

The Only Aristocracy-Fo Foreign Boy Ons
man is as good as another In this eDuntrzs
isn't he?'
other is a policeman"
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Serious Plea5e, mum,
you must send for the doctor, quick, for lit
tie Johnny
Mistress-''Horrors! What is the matterr
Nurse-"I don't know, mum but he hasn't
been up to any mischief for two hours. "
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Nothing -Wife--''Wake up! There
are thieves in the house!'
Husband-"Go down and show them your
new bonnet, and they won't waste any time
ooking for money here"
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06
After the Honermoon.

He-Everybody says you married
me for my money. She-And every
body says / paid an exhorbitant price
for it-Bostcn Transcript
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

The Girl To Have-Sister-"1 don't see
why you are so infatuated with that Miss
Homeboddie. She dresses horribly"
Brother (complacently)- makes 'em
herself"
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Last Long Enough-YouDg Man-''HOW
long will such bicycle as this last2"
Dealer-''Well, sir. I'll warrant it to last
Just as long as you can spare time to ride on
it, and after that you can easily trade it for
ton of coal, a barrel of potatoes, and a
baby buggy.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

A Hasty Toilet-Little Dick-''What are
you tryin' to do, any how!"
Little Dot-''Mammah has sent for the doc.
tor to come and see me. and l is scrubbin
NV tongue so it will be fit to look at"
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Kidnapping-First Boy-"What was that
woman arrested for?'
Second Boy-"Fer kid-nabbing."
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

A Cough, Cold, or Sore Throat should not be
neglected BRowN's BRONCHIAL TROCHEs are a
simple remedy, and give prompt relief. % cts. a
box,
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

NONE are so deaf as those who do
not hear when when they are asked
to take drink.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Brown: That wife of yours just fills the bill.
Jones: She more than does It, The last one
that came in ran clear over to the ne& page.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

SICK HEADACHE, lassitude, weakness and
loss of appetite caused by malaria can be
immediately cured by Beecham's Pills.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

''Thickhed's ignorance has got him into q
box at last. .""Has, eh? What kind of boxr'
''Jury box"
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

"Here is little Christmas ode," said the
poet timidly. you're off," cried the editor.
''Paid the last cent owed yesterday"
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

II the Baby Is Cutting Teeth,
Be sure and use that old and welltred remedy, Mas
WINsLnv's SOOTHING SYRUP for Children Teethin9.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06
schirmann's Asthma Cure

Instantly relieves the most violent attack,
facilitates free expectoration and insures rest
TO those otherwise unable to sleep except in q
chair, as a single trial will prove. send for a
free trial package to DR.. 4. Schinmann, S.
Paul, MINI, but ask your druggist first
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Hegeman's Ca ma phor Ice with Glyeertnes
The original and only genuine. Cures Chapped Hands
and Face Cold Sores sc. e. @. Clark Co. .Haven.C&
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Coughing Leads to Consumption.
Kemp's Balsam will stop the cough as
once. Go to yC1r druggist to-day and get q
sample bottle free. Large bottles Soc and 81.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

When Visiting Kansas City Stop at
the Blossom HOUSE opposite Union Depot.
Fir. class in every re pect, Rates, ESQ day.
Cal le cars to all part; of the city pass the
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

There is tender connection between the
railroad engineer snd his passengers.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

EVERY bride, when she returns
from her wedding trip. says she has
married the best man in the world.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Shiloh's Consumption Cure
Is sold guarantee. 1t cures Incipient Consump
ton. 1t is the best Cough Cure. 2cts. 5Octs s1o
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

Jagson says the only way to elevate the
stage is to lower the curtain.
Western Kansas world., 1894-01-06

A Great -Teacher-"Name some
great writer of former times"
Boy-"Spencer."
Teacher (surprised)-"You have been
closer student than thought, Willie. Now
tell the class what you know of Spencers
writings"
Boy-'sHe wrote CODY books"
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

can holler, jess de sane's he a calm
horgs:
"'Come in. Brer Ben, and git de
ash cake, Ben he low:
"'Shet you big mout. White folks
done wear you
".White folks not hear, Brer Ben.
White folks deep down in the feather
bed.
"ol' mars done year i'm, an bime-
by he slip up on Ben an done kotch
i'm an fore maunin' he done lock i'm
in de conc crib.
"Did JoclEo git he freedom? Dress
God! no, chile. OF mars he took
Brcr Ben an OF Jocko on the log
boat down dc river an sold EN- both
to Niger driver fer de sugar fields.
AFTER while Jinnys boy he come a
crawlin back. lie was crawlin'
kase he feet done friz an he can't
walk. Bless de Lawd, he crawl 'twel
dis day"
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20
August
Flower

used August Flower for Loss OF
vitality and general debility After
taking two bottles l gained 90 lbs.
I have sold more of your August
Flower since l have been in business
than any other medicine l ever kept.
Mr.. Peter Zinville says he was made
a new man by the use Of August
Flower, recommended by me. |
have hundreds tell me that August
Flower has done them more good
than any other medicine they ever
took. GEORGE w. DYE, Sardis,
Mason Co, X. y
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20
KNOWLEDGE

Brings comfort and improvement and
tends to personal enjoyment when
rightly used. The many, who live bet
ter than others and enjoy life more, with
less expenditure, by more promptly
adapting the worlds best products 10
the needs of physical being, will attest
the value to health of the pure liquid
laxative principles embraced in the
remedy, Syrup of Figs.
Its excellence is due to its presenting
in the form most acceptable and pleas
ant to the taste, the refreshing and truly
beneficial properties of perfect lax
alive; effectually cleansing the system,
dispelling colds, headaches and fevers
and permanently curing constipation:
II has given satisfaction to millions and
net with the approval of the medical
profession, because it acts on the Kid
neys, Liver and Bowels without weak
ening them and it is perfectly free from
every Objectionable substance.
Syrup of Figs is for sale by all drug
gists in SOC and 81 bottles, but it is man
ufac.ured by the California Fig Syrup
Co. only, whose name is printed on every
package, also the name, Syrup of Figs,
and being well informed, you will not
accept any substitute if offered.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

The investment of money in coal mining in
France has not been profitable, according to
LEcOnOUiiste Francois From the statistics
OF the ministry of public works II appears
that the capital invested in the coal mines Of
the country was very nearly 1000, 100000
francs. In 1852 and 1888 the average interest
earned on this amount was only . 4 per cent. (;
in the years lSSi-lssg 1t was per cent, and
only in the exceptionally prosperous years
1890 and 1891 did 1t 20 rs high as 3 per
cent. 1t is true that in 1891 the average
earnings in the two districts of Nord and
Pas-de- Calais reached 81 per cent. on the
capital; but in the same year the average re-
turn for the mines outside OF these districts
was only 2lt per cent. A few coal mining
enterprises in France have been financially
successful, but these are offset by a LONE list
OF failures. No wonder the French colllcry
owners are looking to this country 40 u field
for their investments
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20
MEANT FOR MERRIMeN

Nell - Miss Passe hasn't n very
beautiful form, has she? Bellc-No,
but she makes up for it.
How abou. that last scheme of
Blinks? Did it work out all right?'
Blanks-Oh no. 1t only played out
Chief of Police, examining applicant
for position as detective-Do you
know what is meant by felony? APP
plicant-Yes, sir a felony is man
with sore thumb.
Little Mabel - Ethel must think
you're lots better than any of her
other beaux. Mr.. Spoonaway, graft
fed and blushing Why, dear. Little
Mabel-Because she lets me stay in
the room when you call an she don t
when the others call.
"As | grow older" said man of
moderate means, II find that | have
much to be grateful for. Wealth went
past my door and stopped at my
neighbors: but then, SO did death;
while health stopped at mine, AID has
kept us jolly ever since"
Inquisitive Tommy-Sunday is the
first day of the week, isn't it, pa?
His Pa-Yes, my son. Inquisitive
Tommy-And Saturday is the last
day, amt ito His Pa-Yes. Inquisi-
tive Tommy-Thcn how is it that
Saturday comes before Sunday?
Teachcr--Tommy, have you found
out the difference between repabiic
and n monarchy yet? Tomny-I
asked paw about it, and he lid that
in monarchy the people obey their
rulers because they respect them. and
in republic they obey the bosses
cause they can't help it.
Il stoled woman's new s25 bonnet
oncet," said the retired burglar, but
you can bet your life if | ever go into
the business again | won't stetl an
! other one" "Did the woman run You
down and get You sent up?' Nav.
But l took the thing home and
give it to me wife, and she never let
up ON me till gets her Il 500 dress to
go with the bonnet See?'
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20
GETTING RID OF TRAMFS.
San Francisco Dock Loafcrs Given a
Hath and scared Away.

San Francisco Dock Loafcrs Given
Hath and scared Away.
The tramp fraternity had made
itself unusually obnoxious during the
hard times and heroic measures hal
in some places been resortod to for
the purpose of supressing it, In san
Francisco, says the New York Even
ing Post, these gentry had been in
the habit OF loailng and sleeping on
the fruit docks, piliering by day and
taking possession OF tarpaulins for
bedding at night. Some merchants
who do business on the jackson
street dock, in default of police pro
lection, determined to take the law
into their own hands. Accordingly
they organized an anti-tramp asso-
citation. and, concluding that invol-
untary dips in the sea would have Il
more salutary effect on the Migrants
than u short term in jail, the mer-
chants hired some assistance and
made sudden raid. The first vic
tim was placidly smoking on a
pile of sacking when the
regulators seized him. His pro
was UNDECIDED, and in twinkling he
was overheard at the end of II rope
and dragging in the water. Taken
out half drowned, the fellow was
chased off the wharf, and the com
mittec then turned their attention
to his brethren. Tramps who could
swim were thrown into the sea to
make their wAy ont rs best they
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

Are annually lost because poor seed is
planted. Now, when you Sow YOU
want 10 reap, For instance, 4. NJ.
Lamb. Penn, made 81, SEQ on ten ceres
Of vegetables; II. Bcy, Cal, cropped
1918 bushels Salzcr's onions per acre;
Frank Close, MINI, 100 bushels of
spring wheat from two acres; \. Hahn,
Wis. LILO bushels potatoes per acre;
Frank Winter. Montana, ZIG bushels
5 pounds oats from one bushel planted.
This is what Salzcr cullsreaping.
Do YOU want fine vegetables just
twenty days ahead of your neighbors?
If so, send 81 for Salzer's IS packages
earliest vegetable novelties Sufficient
for family.
II You VIII Cut This Ont and Send II
With tic postage to the John A. Salzer
Seed Co. La Crosse. Wis, you Will re-
ccivc their mammoth catalogue and Il
trial package OF Get There, Eli the
sixteen-day radiSh. w.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

This is our Sleeping Car Rate on tine
Philips Rock Island Tourist Excursions
fromChicago to Los Angeles or San Fran
cisco via the Scenic Route md Ogden.
You ,nn 20 with Phillips, the best at all
Excursion Managers, for he has cnch PARTY
accompanied by "a special agent Wild zoe,
the ctire trip with patrons. Thesei r-a.--
honnly conducted Excursions leave ON.
go twice n week, Tuesday and Thursit
W, have also n daily tourist ear sci
vim chr Southern Route, through the bnds
tifullndian Territory and TT, Wort
Los Angeles and San Francisco.
TOURIST car rate via this route, the s., %,
Apply ut Rock Island ticket Office ~,
Ciarl Street JNO. SEBASTIAN, &. a,
c. RI q L. R'y. Chicago
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

The musical instrument called the
Iewsharp, once very popular among
the negroes of the South and men
toned by doubtful chronicler as
one OF the two instruments that Con
necticut Puritans might lawfully
play on Sunday, was really not
named in honor of the Jews. 1t
was once called the jeustrump. or
toy trumpet, and the name jewsharp
is a popular misapprehension.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

With LOCAL APPLICATIONS, as they can
no, reach the seat OF The disease, Caiarrh Is
- blood or constitutional disease and in order
10 urc Il YOU must take internal remedies.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally. and
act, directly On the Hood and mucous sur
faces Halls CatUTTh Cure is not quack
medicine. II was prescribed by one Of the best
physicians in this country Tor years. and Is a
regular prescription. 1t is composed Of the
hes; tonlcs known, combined with the best
blo)d purifiers, acting directly on the mu,
cors surfaces The perfect combination Of
the two ingredients IS what produces such
wonderful results In curing Catnrrh. Send
foficstmonlals, free.
r, J. CHENEY " Co, Props, Toledo, O.
k)d by druggists. price 15c.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

The British cuckoo and the Amori-
can crow black bird were never
known to build nests as other birds
do. They conteLt themselves with
depositing their eggs in the nests OF
others, usually choosing that OF
some smaller representative OF the
feathcred tribe.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20
rhe Disappearance OF Game in America.

IL Is really appalling to compare the enor
nous amount OF game OH this continent AT
the beginning of the century with the
wretehed remnant of to-day A; that time
the American buffalo roamed the prairics In
countless thousands, and was probably the
most numerous large animal in the wo rid,
and now-but all Americans know the sha me-
ful story Of Its determination.
Little more than n hundred years ago great
herds OF elk swarmed In the Kentucky and
Illinois hunting grounds, and even as late
$50 few could be found in the district
north of the Ohio river. To-day their fast
diminishing bands are confined to the noun
tains of the Northwest. The same sad story
OF Disappointing extinction is true OF the
other game animals, the antelope, oighorn,
mountain goat, and the various kinds of deer I;
In fact, it is true OF all our larger animals.
Many persons living to-day will sec their
final disappearance in 4 wild state.-CeHttry.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

A gluttonous man should always wear
plaid waisteoat, 50 as always to keep check
on his stomach
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

Judgc-llave you anything to offer the
court before sentence IS passed. Prisoner
No, your honor. My lawyer took my last
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

BEEcHAM's PILLS stimulate the ptyal!n in
the saliva, remove depression, give appetite,
and make the sick well.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

"Nell,r remarked the genital old Christ
massaint, "if charity can't make people be-
hayi in any other way, she can take a Santa
Cl.ls OHM TO Thorn.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

"ou might say SklCglcs blows in more
mony now than he ever did before "Ilow's
that thought him u $50 cornet last
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

\ girl who has golden hair need not have
n nlAIinl.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

Hauson's Magic Corn Snlvr."
Warranted To cure, or m0u'v reianisi. ASK
your druggist Tor il. Price i ur1ta
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

The world Is on a broad grin when all ma
ture smiles
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

The reason that great many people fal
into the blues Is that they don't look a
things I'm the right light.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

sItiioh's Con ,Esls lsson Cur"
: sold on u gugrIuts. tHlrrr4 l0ciO'ut tnnsuu1r-
1t tGc ursf 's-'i t'Ir HICtf. iJcts q s!t'L
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20
BEST TIME AND SERVICE


Is Afforded by the Burlngton's vestibuled
Aver leaving Denver daily at p. m, reach
ing Chicago at $50 a. m, and st. Louis at
40 l. m, the second morning, making close
connections with all fast trains for the East
and south All meals en- route served In the
famous Burlington dining cara.
Tor full information apply 10 local ticket
admits, or address &. w. Nallcry, General
Mcnt, 1899 18th street Denver.
The tone of mans character Is not always
hi patience in adversely but his stability in
ppsperiy.
MEDICAL writer's claim that the successful
remedy for nasal catarrh must be on-irritat-
irt. easy OF application, and none that viii
rdch the remote sores and liberated sur
flies The history OF the efforts to treat
ctarrh Is proof positive that only one remedy
ha completely met these conditions, and that
jslElys Cream Balm. This safe and pleasant
r,hcdy has mastered catarrh as nothing else
hb ever done, and both physicians and pa
tiSnts freely concede this fact.
I've believe that an Italian who should start
ott with a nolsclcss hand organ would make
mtncy.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

The tone of a mans character Is not always
hi patience in adversely but his stability in
np,sneriy
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

"Agc sticks 10 a man. says contempt
r1ry. So does muclllgr.
The Meeker herald. [volume] (Meeker, Colo.) 1885-current, 1894-01-20

I've believe that an Italian who should start
ott with nolscless hand organ would make
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1894-01-06

OF the book it may be said, saving
only tie Bible, it has been translated
oftener and into more languages than any
other. a recent Spanish editor, Don
Lopez de Fabra, enumerates $50 editions
of the Spanish masterpiece in foreign
languages. That computation is GER
tainly short OF the truth.
Not only are there more translations
in English Of "Don Quixote' than in
any other Language, but it is England
which from the first has done more
honor to the authors work than any
other country. The first critical edition
Of Don cuizote" in Spanish, with the
first life Of Cervantes, by Mayans =
Siscar, was Published in London in 17aS,
more than 20 years before the Spaniards
had aroused themselves 10 do honor to
their greatest writer.
This edition, in four handsome vel
umes, was printed samptuously in all
the glory Of the TonSon press, under the
auspices Of Lord Carteret, at an age
when Don Quixote" was still appearing
in his native country on filthy ballad
paper in e1ecrable type, uncorrected and
unadorned. That which is perhaps still
the best annotated edition OF Don Quix-
ote" iii Spanish was the work Of the
learned aud painful John Bowie, canon
of Salisbury, which appeared in l7sl. II
is said to have been the rumor Of this
undertaking. in which Bowie spent IA
years Ct his life. which made the Span
ish academy hurry with their great edi.
ton Of I7S0.-as0tes and Queries.
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1894-01-06
FRO BE CONTINUED. /
------------
The hIurderer's Hand,

A recent conference Of French chiro-
manists laid down the following rules
for telling a murderer or one likely to
commit murder upon slightest provoca-
ton:
He always has the true pouce de bile,
or "baldheaded thumb'-that is to say,
the thumb has round, dubious appear
ance. 1t is also short, and the nail is 50
abbreviated as to suggest the idea that
the owner has the habit of gnawing ii
down to the flesh. Tie nail is deeply
buried in the flesh, which rises on either
side and extends much above the surface.
A remarkable or abnormal develop.
ment of the Mount of Mars" which,
plainly speaking, means q thickening OF
the outside edge of the hand. Chiro-
manists say that persons with this mark,
when in a passion, have rushes of blood
to the brain, which cause them to ''see
red"
He has the "scaffold sigma violent
and abrupt cutting off of the "line of the
head" (the one running across the palm,
by the line running toward the fingers
from the wrist.
The presence Of but three lines in the
palm these occasionally reduced to two)
and always of a bright scarlet.
Crooked and uneven, knotty fingers,
with broad tips, and nails very small
ragged and uneven.-St. Louis Republic
Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1894-01-06

swer to queries Of mothers relative to
books and games 10 entertain children,
they subsequently established The Child
Garden, the "only kindergarten maga-
zine for children in tho world"
1--WE felt at length" said Andrea as
she related 10 me the capitalization Of
the Kindergarten Literature Company,
chat the kindergarten movement was
growing beyond us; that we two girls
were not powerful enough to be Its
mouthpiece. thought it all out ons
night in bed. organized a stock COM
paDy with a capital OF $4,000 and plan
ned the enterprise as it has since ma
terialized Enthused with the idea, /
jumped out Of bed, Weakened my sisters
and told them my plan. They dubbed
me crazy and sent me 10 bed. Next day
/ succeeded in getting come dozen
wealthy women Of Chicago into our
office and laid my plan before them. In
two weeks the kindergarten Literature
company was incorporated with cap
ital Of $1,000"
They have one Of the most complete
printing Offices in the west and publish
besides these two nonthlies other week
y and quarterly periodicals.. with job
and book trade that is rapidly growing.
In a love Of q fat in Prairie avenue
these perpetual motion girls have ideal
bachelor quarters. Here are Andrea's
volumes Of ehildren's tales and AmaIie's
dainty verse, and the concert grand, from
which the youngest and fairest flower
Of the rose garden Of girls eyolrss classic
strains once week. Bertha. the prodi-
gal. joins them from the suburban town
where she has kindergarten school,
while at intervals the proud father and
mother visit them from the Iowa farm.
Sincerity is the keynote 10 this charming
>Jasehold. Ida Rose McCABE.