The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1894-12-30

SELLING JOKES.
their joke money. Each week they write
20 to so of these paragraphs, and then
taking them in their market basket go
out and dispose of them.
They 90 to the keenest editor first,
and he takes what suits him. Then they
20 to one who is little less alert with
what is left, and so ON till the lot is
disposed Of It would be amusing to
give here the order in which the differ
emit papers are arranged in the mind Of
the joke writer and the name of the last
editor they 60 to, but l do not dare do it
here, though l have been let into the
secret by friends who are in the bust
ness.
Those who think that Mr.. Pulitzer
writes all the original humorous nom
pariel jokes in The World and Mr.. Da-
ma those that appear in The Sun make
a great mistake. Sometimes there will
be week at time when neither of
these gentlemen writes a joke for the
paper, for by the time they have enter
tanned visitors, shown them the new job
press and how to pick business card
out of its jaws without leaving thumb
on the FORMS written a scathing edito-
rial, Christmas poem and few book
reviews, attended an old settlers meet
ing, made kettle of composition for the
rollers and outlined the policy of the
croquet column for the ensuing day,
read the proof and prepared the hotel
arrivals for press, it is time to 60 home.
A great many people think that II
they get down to The Sun Office at half
after they will find Mr.. Dana sweep
ing out his Office and putting fresh
newspaper in his canary cage, but this
is not the case. For several years he
has been enabled to hire this work done.
He also lives in summer on a little pri-
vate island, and by the time he rows
over to New York he claims that he has
had all the exercise he needs
The following letter comes from the
agricultural regions of Oregon and has
many local expressions in it peculiar to
the wheat growing country. have not
interfered with the spelling. ''Kuk" is
q new one on me, but judge that it
means cook.
The strawbuck is the person who
bucks the straw. He is generally boy
or feeble minded person with poor out
cast of horse and fence rail The
fenco rail is attached by each end to
ropes and thence to the traces of the
horse (if there are any traces left Of
him), and when pile of straw or
feet high has accumulated at the tail of
the machine the strawbuck throws this
rail over it and draws it of few rods,
scattering it over the field, where it is
burned.
Mr.. Pike writes like a Mormon and
spells with the whole arm movement"
/ presume, capitalizing his own name,
while to the Deity he gives lower case
''l'' and spells country with a *. -
His meek spirit and constant refer
ence to his devout nature would indi-
cate that he belongs to the church of
Latter Day Saints. and that in Grass
Canyon smokehouses should be worn
with paddock on the outside:
GRAs KASYoS Oregon DC % 1894
mister nye deer friend hav red ure published
excomunikashuns with crate LATTER an no
by ure ritin that q r fare an spare western
man an tho. u wood like TO here from this
part OF the kuntry am lover of the lord an
am q workin with a thrash;n nnashene an
am what tina cal the straw buck an marandy
she kuks il the kuk wagin an she is also a
luver Of the lord with crate humility IN up-
ritenes Of hart IN luv that gal with tru
krishUn devoshun an lie bet a mexican sadel
agin pare Of bare skin snaps that they ant
nun ov the boys il the fte with me but the
SAX gigger he Is the best SIX boss driver n
whip hand that ever buked wheel from this
sekshun 10 the colurnby river an he kan krak
q fi often his OF ieders ear without maxim his
pinters wink IN uarandy she nose IL an he
nose that she nose Ii an whats WIS he nose that
/ rose that she nose hit an the inseneear an the
hodlurns an the derrick forisrs an the rouss-
about an the hole ornsry oRresenersted outfit
nose that he nose that nose that he nose that
she nose hit an they are sorce Of crate anCy-
ance 70 me- an vexsshun Of speeret an tina lAf an
max that gal friskyrn dog on bunch g-as
kayuse .ole our minister about IL an hes -
good krishun ever srid 10 <orel siner IN
he didn't do nothin bat laf sol darn him an
then tole my naybrr duchy gioins an he's as
good q fire. saefhodis. as ever roPt steaf an he
role ne 70 pra but DO no an tax my pan II
hand TO ask IS man 20 man wood q pra an
b;is hi the vii Of the lord OF wood q sol
from erase long AMI 10 mock tina: SAX gigsef
into sc flinders with my buckin raile ss kav
ofteh loud 20 do An waite ure anser with crate
anxiety a am rr deer friend
JAMES PIX
an tv with nj folks IN Srss ksnyon but IL q
vii rite to BiZgs Sherman county oregon Wi
git IL that's wasr buck whet 20
1t Is rather late now 20 answer this
letter, but you Will gain nothing by
personal violence. Mr.. Pike, and your
rival might turn uron you. for you know
that even the wheeibarrow viii turn
when trodden upon, and he might dis
figure you
Bide your time, james, and all viii
be well Would il not pay you 70 travel !