The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1894-05-01
VAN7EDANIFE.
A DOLLAR PAYS FOR
THE CAD"
And II Cost Him Ten Dollars For the
Stamps to Reply to the Answers
A Hooking County Romance.

stamps TO Reply to thc Answers.--
A Hooking Couuty Romance.
Mr.. William ,Whitmore--which
by the way is not his. right name
but which we will use for the occa-
sion-an honest tiller of the soil,
who lives not many miles from the
county-seat of Hooking. has
achieved great distinction recently
through his endeavors TO obtain a
wife.
Disappointed in previous mat
rimonial affair, and left u "grass
widower" by decree of our courts,
heslaid his plans to accomplish u
two fold object by advertising for
another mate. In calculating
mood he recfoned that no might
thus secure his choice of a number
of desirable parties, and, at the
same time, visit'confusion upon his
former wife--who by the way lives
within sight of Williams domain
by his apparent Disregard.
The success that has crowned his
efforts has, however, proven huge
surprise even to himself. 1t was
with great reluctance that he one
day, about a month ago, finally
yielded to the Establishments of a
seductive advertisement,and being
somewhat illiterate himself, hired
Il neighbor school boy to write a
letter and enclose dollar to mat
rimonial bureau in West Virginia,
with a request that they do as much
good for him as possible for the
money. In the communication he
wrote the editor;
IL woul d rather have women
not over 80 or under 20. One not
afraid of work preferred. We keep
seven cows am do our own bakin'
am washin'. It's a little lonely
here maybe for city women, but
am lovin' am would try to make
it happy fer u good wife who is
willin' to do herspart. There is no
ager round here abouts this section
eny more, an the scenery is good.
l will pay railroad fare here for the
right woman and will meet her at
the depo. Get as much of this as
you can in your paper fer 81 an
oblige
Yours,
WIN. WHITMoRE
The next week Lige, as he was
familiarly DUBBED, received copy
of the paper containing his "ad,'
and had it not been for a blue pen
Gil mark encircling it he would
hardly have been able to find it
For his dollar he received one briel
line, which said most tersely, bu,
truthfully:
"wanted-A Wife, VIM. whitmore, --
Hooking County, Ohio"
Now it might be truthfully said
that as Lige was hard working
individual.and it took equal hard
work for him to part with a dollar
even in pursuit ofa hclpmate who
was to do the looking after the
seven cows and other light work
around the house, the sight of only
one line came very near brin gin.
on stroke of paralysis.
"One dollar! Jumpin' Jehosa
phat!" walled Lige, "my money
throw'd away. That durn line u
never do me eny good"
But he was destined to be great.
surprised. The next mail brough
replies, and for over two week
they sifted into the pos
office at the average of 70 per mail
The over worked Postmaster ha(
to hire an assistant, and threatened
to resign unless his salary wa
raised. The letters are still com
ing, and as neither Lige nor tn,
Postmaster can devise any way Q
shutting them off, it is hard to tel
what the end will be.
"Love letters? ?" said Lige to re
porter of the DEMOCRAT, "weIl
should smile! Lookey here strang
err" and with 4 dubious grin h
pointed to mammoth dry good
box that he had procured from on
of our merchants and which wa
doing duty as escritoire. Their
were great stacks of letters, write
on every colored paper under tn
sun, and inclosed IN envelopes c
every conceivable size and desigr
Some emitted the repulsive odor Z
}, questionable perfume, while other
were written upon cheap whit
: note paper, and were backed in
hand which indicated that milkin
seven cows or even splitting tn
wood might be no foreign task t
the writer.
~ don't know about lettIn' We sc
'emp' said he doubtfully, "some Q
fha frI ,.At enc "a