davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
Bound to be In the Swim.

An illustration Of the abject devotion
Of come women in New York to society
vas related by q fashionable physi.
clan to q Sun reporter. He had been
called regularly every day to treat n
woman who was very populat socially
for general debility and exhaustion.
She insisted upon dancing until 8 or 1
o'clock every morning and her days
were a perpetual round of receptions,
lrnches and teas. She would not take
time for sufficient sleep ind thought
the doctor could manage to pull her
through the season by tOnicS Of vuli.
GUS kinds. She insisted upon continu-
ing her social rounds, 80 he hit upon a
and this she now carries out to q let
ter. Her day begins Mt 3 O'clock in the
afternoon, instead of 10 o'clock In the
norning. Her rooms are darkened and
nothing Is allowed to disturb her rest
until 3 o'clock. Then she takes q
tepid bath ind II out through course
Ct massage by O Swedish woman. She
Is rubbed vigorously and her blood
forced into circulation. Then che takes
cup Of chocolate, dresses for the af-
ternoen, and ut 4 o'clock steps into her
carriage to make her necessary calls.
An hour before dinner abe lies down
!s,Ju pug 'mooI p,us4Isp o " uIpsu
dinner she goes at her own pace until
3 or 4 o'clock the next morning. Tho
only stipulation the doctor made was
that before going to bed she should
drink at least pint Of milk and eat
some biscuits. Az It 10 dark at. hnlf
past now she has only about an hour
and half Of daylight, but she u 60
Ing through the season, while preserv.
ing her Life, and thiA after all, u some.
thing.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
Small Social Duties.

A distinct mark of good breeding
which young girls ire apt to treat ratl.-
cr lightly is what we may call the
small social obligation.
Every girl who has been well brought
up will Of course perform her impor-
tant duties. be they social or other
wise. She will cell to see her friend
who has been In trouble. She could
not fail to answer promptly in writing
any written invitation, or to return Il
first visit In due time, whether the ac-
qslaintance offered her be acceptable
or not, but there IRE q thousand and
one slight occasions constantly arising
Which one, unless she is quite punctili.
Gus In such matters, as she should be,
Is apt to sail to recognize as obliga-
tiors.
There is no courtesy that may with
good taste be either accepted or de-
tlined without polite acknowledgement.
The receipt through the mails of q
newspaper addressed by friend, and
containing u marked paragraph Of in.
terest to either or both, should be an
swcred promptly by note, unless, for
Instance, the recipient should happen
to have another paper or magazine.
holding some further notice Of the
same subject. In that case tie send
Ing Of this, with article marked, SHOULD
be grateful and sufficient acknowl.
edgment of the first.
Ordinary notes Of regret sent in an
swer to formal, invitations need, of
course, no reply, being themselves final
answers. But when friend declines
an invitation, assigning as q reason for
50 doing that her little brother has fall.
en- and broken his collar-bone, or that
sht. herself las met with an accident,
All early note expressing regret and in
terest-or q visit, II the deg.ee Of in
timAcy requires it's absolutely obi.
gatory.-Harper's Young People.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
A View Of Matri.o.y.

What a pity 1t is that our girls are
brought up to regard marriage Us al
most as inevitable as death! 1t handi-
caps them from the start in their inter-
course with men. While they always
have the feeling Of being on parade for
inspection there can be no naturalness
or simplicity. II girls were taught to
regard matrimony as possible but not
inevitable; taught also that q career
In which work, with achievement, il
possible to a woman; that life without
mltrimony may still be life Of useful
ness and happiness, I fancy there would
be more ease Of manner in the social
relations Of men and women, and more
beneficial friendships betw.en them
New York Recorder,
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
TVMDLiNo UPWARD.
A Pssulia. Danssr to which nee
Sea Fish are Exposed.

a Peculiar Danger 70 which 0eeD
Sea Fish are ExDeseA.
It 10 only reasonable t. suppose that
the ability to sustain this enormous
pressure can only be sequired BY ami.
mails after generations Of gradual mi.
grations from shallow waters. Those
forms that ore brought up by the
dredge from the depths Of the ocean
are usually killed and distorted by
the enormous and rapid diminution Of
pressure In their journey to the sur
face, and It is extremely probable
TINT shallow water forms would be
similarly killed and crushed out Of
very deep water.
depths are. In consequence Of the enor-
Of accident. II, In chasing their prey
considerable distance above the
swimming bladder become considerably
expanded. and their specific gravity
very greatly reduced; up to a certain
AAtutS llS hAuSNAC0 VA uASl1 OOuaS0 NNH
counterfeit the tendency to float up
ward and enable the fish to regain its
proper sphere Of life at the bottom;
but beyond that limit the muscles are
not strong enough to drive the body
downward. and the fish. becoming
more and more distended Us 1t goes.
Is gradually killed on its long and
involuntary journey to the surface Of
the sen.
The deep sea fish. then. are exposed
to a danger that no other animal In
the world is subject to. namely, that
Of tumbling upward. That such nc.
cidcnts do occasionally occur Is evil
denced BY the fact that some fish,
which are known to be true deep sen
forms. were discovered dead and float
ing on the surface Of the ocean long
before our modern Investigations were
commcnccd.-I'opular Science Month
".
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
Jocko ON A BIG SPREE.

Srer'Monk Taken to jail By Two Pc.
ticemen After Wrecking q Saloon.
Two policemen conducting drunk
IN monkey to jail was one of the ln-
usual sights seen the other duy in
Flmira, says the New York Sun. Tie
monkey ia member Of bod Bncser's
circus, but has been occupying winter
quarters as a side attraction ut Els
toms saloon on East Water street,
and was left chained during the tenn.
porary absence of tho proprietor. He
managed. however. to FREQ himself,
and walked over behind the bar. He
glanced In the big looking glass back
Of the row Ut cOlOrcd bottles, and,
seeing another fellow Of his own size.
picked up a decanter and let 1t 60
with his right. aud Mr.. Elston's 500
glass was q wreck. His opponent hay-
ing been got rid of. the monkey pro.
ceetlcd to test the various liquid re-.
freshlnents on hand. He turned on the
beer and took long deep draught.
Then Ire sampled the whisky, gin,
wine and various other skipds of bit
tiers. 1t wasn't long until he was roar.
ing drunk. Then he tackled the cigar
case and demolished that. throwing
the cigars about the room In hand
fuls. The monkeys screams and the
noise Of shattered glass attracted q
crowd about the front of the saloon,
but the door was locked and there
was no way to get In. Finally two
policemen came and boosted q bold
young fellow through the transom.
After a lively tussle he managed to
get rope around the drunken monkey,
and he was hoisted through the win
dow and escorted by the two police
men. one on each side. to jail and
lodged In cell. The next morning the
prisoner was very sick and held his
head between his paws. Although 1t
was his second offense the recorder
suspended sentence. and he was led
back to the saloon and chained up.
The next time he gets drunk the owner
will send him to the Kelley cure ut
Binghamton.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
Kans., Farm Cro,. 4. 1soa.

The report Of the Kensas Depart.
ment Of Agriculture, for the quarter
ending Dec. 81, just issued, Is largely
occupied with the statistics Of 1893
showing the states acreage and yield
of field, orchard 0nd garden crops,
With their values, 81 nd the numbers and
values Of live stock.
The statistics indicate that, in spite
eft adverse crop conditions and low
Prices so widely prevalent, Kansas, in
the year 1893, raised field crops worth
nerrly $7O,O00,OOO and marketed live
stock, agricultural and horticultural
PRE- ducts worthless, O0O, 900 more, or to.
gether amounting to $122, 565, 70S. OS, be-
sides undoubtedly having as much live
stock yet on hand, as In March, when
the count was made by township rs.
SCISSORS, the valuation Of which is up.
wards Of $98,OOO,COO.
The yield Of winter and spring wheat
was 24,827,523 bushels, value $1O855,.
10; corn 118,64, $50 bushels, value
$32, 621, 762; oats q, 100, III bushels, val.
ue 80, 4SS,342; animals slaughtered OF
sold for slaughter, value $52,774, 7Gl.
The numbers of live stock are, horses
SD, 1S0. value $44, 72O, 672; mules 49,
5S5, value $5,492, go; milch COWS $751;.
1853, value 11,347 ,O6O; other cattle l..
5G,273, value $25,5S9, Gal; sheep 2o4..
0o2. value $50, $50; swine 1,4O0 OSG.
value $10,545,6 Gas.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
serious defect.

A hungry pedestrian had put up for
the night ut a waysidc inn, and found
the supper rather scanty. the most
substantial part Of it being IL single
sausage
With IL faultflnding look and gesture
he called the innkeeper to his side.
us that the best you can do in the
way of s;lrsage?" asked the traveller.
why, now" said the host, isn't 1t
good!'
"Oh, it's good enough, perhaps, but
the ends of it don't suit me-"
''Tlie ends! What's the matter with
them?"
Too near together" said the hun
cry man, and the innkecper took the
hint.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
TIVE VETERANS spase.s
e sssusxt eat q Ki.aly spst N the
Heart Of the SseretaPy.

e Ufeugkt eat . kinAly SDet IN the
Heart 81 the secretary.
Speaking Of Senator Proctor. has
Q peculiar experience with him q yes
or % ago when he was secretary Of
war. It was taken ''by consent that
he was q hard man to work" and
that perhaps the best way to do Il
was under protection Of well con-
structed. unshakable "alibi." unless, In.
deed, your business was al serious and
determined as he was. An ancient
comrade Of 'battle map called to see
me, and with haggard face Of unut-
terable misery he quietly took q chair.
He was gallant soldier and splendid
looking fellow, not 90 young a. he was
In days Of R10ry-none Of US are-more's
the pity-and for number Of years
had been a clerk In the war depart.
ment. Under pressure dug out Of
him the fact TINT he had lust awakened
from o terrible spree. to which he had
appended a humping cracker by raid
Ing his neglected Office like Western
blizxard, generously insisted on ''clean.
ing out" the whole establishment from
cellar to garnet, firing his resignation
in their faces and departing highly
delighted with himself.
But" said he quietly. sorrowfully,
nothing Gun be done: it's too late. I
may Us well forever quit. Just drift.
ed in on you without q purpose" etc.
Compelling him to remain ut my desk
q few moments hurried over to the
war department to face for him what
wouldn't have dared for myself. The
dreaded minister-I didn't know him
so well then-was promptly seen, and
the statement and appeal as quickly
made. It must have struck the sym.
pathies Of the old warrior. for, without
q word. he touched u bell and called
for the chief clerk. When he appeared
the question was deliberately rum.
bled:
What about General So-and-so's res
ignation?"
1T was accepted yesterday"
"Unacccpt 1t, then"
"But the place has been filed"
"Unfill 1t. then"
Only this and nothing more. I rose
and tried to say. THANK you" but the
vocal organs wouldn't work shook
his hand lin italics) and started to
hurry the news to the unhappy face ut
my desk, but the many Of STONY heart'
walked to the door with me, and, with
his orm gently around my shoulder,
said:
well, Mac, I suppose we've got to
let the old boys fill up occasionally,
but you tell your friend not. to do It
again."
A kodak Of the generals face d few
moments later would have been price.
less to patent medicine man in search
OF a rare and radiant before and after
Observation-Disclosures Post.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
A CURIOUS INQUIRY
NJ nsn,s Faces Grew e Resemble
These 81 Other AAinalst

NJ 2sn,s Faces Grew e As0sAblo
These Of Other Anlnalst
There u o very curious point con-
nected with the more pronounced AMI
mai faces-namely. those IN charge Of
animals grow to bt like them. Thus,
. hostler in charge Of tramway horses
has himself . nne Roman-nosed horse
type Of head. growing day BY day more
like his horses. Men In charge Of cattle
on the farm become essentially bovine.
and in Shropshire it has often been
remarked that the sheep breeders re-
semble their own rams. ! cannot ex-
plain these irregularities, which, how
ever, are wholly or partly true. The
sheep type Of man u not indicative Of
great intelligence, and ID usually found
In remote agricultural districts. The
bull dog characters In o man denote
courage without refinement, but In the
case Of q lady-ridlculously like her ia
vOrite pug dOg-with neg retrousse, the
refinement was not wanting. The rs
Quimaux, or Lapps, In the water, are
80 like seals tlat q man has been shot
in error, the wistful expression Of coun.
tenance being common to both, as the
head only appears ut the surface OF the
water. have seen q comfortable
looking bear mun In the train, and
wizencd, Bat-faced old woman once In
Brittany. These are examples that
might easily be multiplied q hundred
fold were 1t not for the m0nOtOny OF
reiterati0n. 1t is not without interest
to remark that there Is work extant,
dating a couple Of hundred years back,
which deals with this very subject.
The writer was q professor ut Padua.
The treatise is In Italian, or possibly
Latin. and many curious wood cuts
illustrate the work. giving the various
facial angles Of man and beast, accord.
Ing to strict measurement.
For my part I do not propose to
explain the strange resemblance be-
tween man and the inferior brute crea-
ton; 1t Is enough to note the fact.
We're 1t Buddhist priest commenting
on these things, he might explain the
tenets OF the transmigratiOn Of souls.
At Colombo I once observed q yellow
ROBBED priest leave the footpath In order
to avoid crushing the life out of some
venomous ants crossing the road. 1t
would have been sin for him to kill
any living thing, for "who knows"
he would say, "what immortal spirits
might be imprisoned in each lowly
bodyY Such one might build pref
ty theory upon the subject of these Gus
uni resemblances between man and
beast, fish and bird. Each existence
might be the foreshadowing Of the one
to come, or the reflection Of one which
had passed away. The series Of lives,
he would argue, exhibit the evolution
Of the spirit working out a certain des-
tiny through untold ages, gradually
approaching that refinement of spirit
uni existence when the contemplation
Of Nirvana should be assured to each
spirit entity in the realms Of eternal
bliss. Retrogression in this scheme, I
presume, would mean extinction when
the atoms of matter IRE lost in the
whirl of astral dust.-Pall Mall Ga
zette.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
A French Duel.

II the French are prone to challenge
each other to fight duels on the smallest
prOvOcation. they are also prone to
bring them to mn end with very little
fighting.
1t is crclibly related that. on the oc.
clsiOn OF q duel between two members
Of the chamber of deputies. one Of the
cOmbatants was taken with q 1T Of
bleeding at the nose Just Us they came
upon the field.
Blood" exclaimed one Of the seconds
Of the other man. BLOOD has been
shed. The honor Of my principle has
been satisfied"
And the parties and their seconds
thereupon gravely left the field.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
Can Animals Blush,

1t is hard to tell whether animals
blush. for their faces are covered so
thickly with fur, or hair. or feathers,
that we do not know what may be
going on beneath hide or skin. Were
they as barefaccd as man is. 1t is more
than likely we should see them blush.
especially the more bashful sort, and
those with some sense of shame.
1t is the case that the faces of yul.
lures flush. and several of the monkeys
become purple with rage, which may
be considered as q kind of blushing,
This may be proved any day in the
monkey house in Central Park, whore
the monkeys seem to fly II to q passion
on the smallest provocatiOn.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09

For sale.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09

St0mmeltngly; put YOU drew 1t from
ME: did not make 1t willingly. I
would rather have left you to hear the
disclosure from my grandfather; 1t
would have been better to"
Gertrude Gilruth" the baronet
broke forth. In hoarse voice, my life
will henceforth be blank and a mis-.
cry to me; and you, YOU have made It
such!'
And starting to his feet once more,
he paced the room with rapid strides.
Suddenly he stopped. his face white as
snow. his eyes glaring wildly.
WHO Is this favored. happy lover
Of yours. Miss Gilruth?" he inquired,
sternly. NAY. never heed me! What
right have to ask YOU such a question?
Pray forgive mel think am going
mad"
Saying which, Sir Basil resumed his
rapid pacings to and fro. Presently
he dashed out of the room, flung open
the cottage door, rushed out into the
street, and was gone.
Sir Basil DOvetree's nature was not
Mt all secretivc one; and moreover
than tlSat, he bad not sufficient pa
thence to bear trouble of any kind
without complaint. Into Warrington's
car lie therefore poured, Mt once, the
whole relation of his hearts recent dis
appointment.
With placid countcnance the creole
listened to his friends tale. His bosom
was all aglow with triumph and suits.
faction, for .the explanation which had
just occurred between Sir Basil and
Gertrude Gilruth was the very event
which Warrington had been longing
for.
The young baronet might now be
nodded according to the creOlc's pleas.
urc-might Ike drawn into any extray.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
GERONIMO ON THE BENCH.
The Famous Apache Acting a. q Jus.
tice of the Peace In Alabama,

The Famous Apache Acting a. q jus.
tice of the Peace IA Alabama.
John p. Clum, a postoffice inspec.
tor, who spent some time recently in
the camp Of the renegade Apaches at
Mount Vernon barracks. Alabama, re-
ports that they have made creiitable
progress In the arts Of civilization.
Mr.. Clum should be competent Judge,
for he spent several years with these
Indians on the San Carlos reservation
in Arizona. and afterwards 1t became
his duty, in April. 1877. to assist in
the capture ut Oio Caliente. N. Mex,
of Geronimo. Francisco. and other
Apache renegades. Subsequently Ger
onimo escaped again. and after q new
career of bloOdshed aud rapine surren-
dercd to Gen. N. A. Miles. This was
in 1886. Later the Apaches of Ger
Onimo's band. men. women and chill
dren. We're sent to Alabama. For the
first year or two the mortality among
them was very great, but, according
to the New York Evening Post, they
have now become acclilnated. Each
family has frame house. equipped
with cooking range and necessary fur.
niture. to live in. The Indians have
adopted a civilized style of dress; the
men weave baskets and the women
wash clothes. In the matter Of per-
s0nal cleanliness every one of them
Is compelled to battle once q week, and
some Of the men do 80 every day. A
company Of infantry has been formed
out of the young men. and their bar
racks Is part Of the Indian village.
Geronimo has been elected an alcalde,
or justice. and tries minor oftenses
reported to him. His sentences to
terms Of Imprisonment in the guard
house seem to give general satisfaction.
This once bloodthirsty chief is now
content to make an honest penny by
selling bows and arrows and also pho
tographs Of himself. The young chill.
dren are being educated in the settle
ment. and the older ones attend the
Carlisle school. While these Apaches
are prisoners Of war, they are yir-
tually on parole. and come and 20
s they please.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
Go Be Continued.)
GETTING RID OF THE BEARD.

electricity VIII do the Work, bat
Not Without Considerable csst.
The hair Of man il gradually disap-
l'earing before the march Of civilization,
says the New York Sun. Nature, who
is an economical dame, has gradually
removed the hair from the top Of the
head where 1t is no longer useful. Still.
kindly Intentional, decorative fringe
is left for ornament. Man himself
would have gladly compounded with
nature, and bartered some Of the
growth on his face for q few hanL!-
fuls Of hair on his head. Nature, how
ever, knew the value Of shaving as dis
cipline and refused to interfere. Now.
1t appears, man sees the way to estab-
llsh permanently clean face for him.
self. No more early rising for mutu-
tir al shave nor dallying In barber shops
awaiting turn. The method is simple
but expensive. 1t is done with the
electric needle-at a cost Of about g q
The operation takes time. Owing to
removal can be done only in patches
uAAASoo - ASAny Va pAAy csS AUAAc OS PAONAN.
cd. The operation is painless, us tho
ground has been prepared by cocaine.
With the latter improvements In cleo
trio lights and magnifying mirrors the
time may come that man will eradi.
cate the brambles Of his face as easily
as n farmer mows down q hedgerow.
A Roman youth used to receive his
ttga virilis the day Of his first shave.
The occasion WIS fete. -Cornclin,
Lcsbia, Flavia and the rest had been
liz mstitching and feather stitching his
toga in secret moments for weeks be-
fore. In the new day the occasion will
doubtless be the same. The girls, hav.
ing saved their pocket money, will have
ready an electric needle. ivory mount
ed, or in repousse silver; with mono.
gram, when the youths first growth
Is sufficiently sighted for removal
Thus far it Is easy, to predict an arls-
tocracy of smooth faces. Even at
wholesale rates the effaccmcnt of the
beard is bound for long time to be
beyond the reach of the multitude.
This of itself Is certain to make smooth
faces fashionable.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
There wer. 63S2 books pnblished in 1893.
or $50 fewer than the previous year.

1913 BUSHELS ONIONS PER ACRE.
DO you want fine vegetables Just
twenty days ahead of your leighbOrs!
II 80. send 81 for Salzer's IS packages
earliest vegetable novelties (sltiicient
for a family. His seeds are Northern
grown. extremely early. enormously
productive. Think Of 1t! Il. Bey Cali.
fOrnia. grew 1918 bushels onions from
S,.lzer's seed per ucrc. How? That Is
the secret which Salzer imparts to oil
who buy his onion seed. He offers
cabbage ripening In sixty days; a pca
In forty: a new tomato. the Ferris
Wheel, measuring two feet In circum.
ference. and lnanv other remarkable
sorts Of small fruits. flower and vege.
table seeds. potatoes. farm seeds, etc.
II YOu WALL Cut This Out and send Il
With Zoe to the John A. Salker Seed
Co., La Crosse. Wis. YOU will receive
their mammoth catalogue and pack.
age Of Ferris Wheel Tomato. "
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
The Modern Way

Commends itself to the well informed, to
do pleasantly and effectually what was
formerly done in the cruflest manner and
disagreeably as well. To cleanse the sys-
TEN and break up colds headaches and fe.
vers without unpleasant after effects, use
the delightful liquid laxative remedy, syrup
Of Figs.
The pioneer express. [volume] (Pembina, Dakota [N.D.]) 1883-1928, 1894-03-09
sellinx Photographs.

Paris tradesmen who sell photo.
graphs say that pictures of promin-
ent men are very little in demand
nowadays They are seen so often
In the illustrated papers that photo
graphs no longer 90. The actresses
and fashionable women. Of all social
grades. are eagerly bought, not by
their admirers among men mainly,
but by dressmakers of the second
class in Paris and the provinces.
The latter buys the photographs to
study the patterns.