Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1894-02-14
PITH AND POINT.

There are too many people in the
world who use their nest-eggs to make
cake of.-Atchizon Globe.
There are times when he is very
gloomy" AZ don't wonder; he calls
himself seIf-made man."-New YORK
Press.
A Western lecturer has selected for
his subject "a Bad Egg" This subject
often strikes lecturer unfavorabIy.-
Texas Siftings.
Rosaline-''Hov is your new bcaul'
Grace-"Oh, lie promises we'll" Rosa
lie (warningly)-'.Ge him to write. -
New York Herald.
When an unmarried woman says she
has remained single from choice, do nos
be so rude as to ask her ''fron whose
choiceT-Bostou Transcript.
George Eliot says: "Tae man who
trusts 4 friend educltc5 him" But the
tgIs.er often gets the most experimental
Observation-Disclosures Post.
An aati-crank Dill has been intro
ducei into Con .ress. Tne farmers boy
will be anxious to know if it ilc.u les
tie grindstone.-LoTeI Courier.
The banana has great variety of
uses. 1t is said that foIr is nov made
from it. It is no secret that the skin
makes low slippe:s.-LowolI Courier.
Querist-'sWhy did You borrow that
'lve' Of Smith, the restaurateugl"
Aujace ITO give litslc lunch ut the
Ettie Gaze. Kate Fields Washington.
After much solicitation the German
Government has decided not to send the
Watch on the Rhine TO the Worlds Co.
lumbian Exposiiion.--Jewe,cJs' C.rcu-
lar.
\ woman can give much more aivive
about how to keep a husbands love on
the first anniversary Of her marriage than
sac can at her silver wedding. g.-E!mira
Gazette.
lie Cfishing for conplimeaD-"Au
handsome men are coacei-ei, YOU know"
She-"But it does not follow that all
conceited men are handsome -"-Bostoa
Transcript.
Lady engaging servans)-':You seem
TO possess every necessary Qualification.
Have YOU sweetneavti' Servant
''No mum; but can soon get one."-
The Comic.
He-"WcI, how is IEr. Jones getting
on since his Gcciientl' Shc-"They |
say he doesn seem like himself" lie |
well, that must be 4 comfort to his |
wife. Boston Beacon.
AIistress-''Faachette, why don't you
sweep with the new brooml" Fdnchet;e
madame, the room was so dirty |
Thought I'd use the old one a Nt;ie yet
and save the new oae."-Comic.
Young Mrs. Fitts-''You do no: tire
of my singing, do you, dearl" Mr.. Fits
-''No, love; your voice reminds m9 so
much of that girl was engaged to along
in 1885" And she hasn't sang anything
since. indianapolis Journal.
"Why, how is this! You, your Wis,
aud all of the family have got your faces
bandageG? Are you all afflicted with
the toothache." "You sec, our oldest is |
learning to be a dentist and SO he is
drawing our teeth for a bit Of practice"
Tommy's Mamma (as Tommy suddenly
BURST out crying-"What is the mat
teri" Tommy--'sI hurt myself this
afternoon" Tommy's Mamma-"Why
didn't you cry thea instead of nowln
Tommy" Cause Twas busy. 1 was
playin' with Freddy then. Comic.
Bulfnch--''lIiss Smilax has a wonder
ful memory" Wooden-''WhY, what
proof has she given Of it2' Bul6nch-
"Why, met her at supper last night
and she not only reminded me about our
being engaged last summer, but gave me
q number of the details. Boston Cour-
ter.
Jack Hardup with unwonted enthusi- /
asm)-'tBy Jovel l see that some fellow
is talking about introducing bill into
the house making it misdemeanor TO
send annoying letters to any one. Very
cle-er idea that. Ill have my tailor
locked up for six months, by JOvew-
Tit-Bits.
A famous railway president, while out
for q constitutional a few weeks since,
noticed a son Of toll digging a ditch.
"Pretty hard work2" suggested the rail-
way magnate. The laborer put down his
pick and shovel and replied, with delib-
Grafton: "Wef, it aint't lawn tinnus."
--Hsrper's Drawer.
Philistine Wife-"Your paper isn't ct
all amusing just now. But there, must
confess it is not easy to be either funny
or witty every week" Journalist (nucl
worried)-''No, my dear, much easier to
be always dull and prosaic every even
ing" He was about to add personal
but as, fortunately, he didn't,
the subject dropped. Punch.