davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
He Answered the Dissertation.

The old gentleman in his heart did moi
object to the young man as a son-in-law
Dut he was one of that kind of old gentle
men who like to raise objections first and
Then reach an agreement, as though he were
conferr1ng a favor, and when the YOUNG
man called on the important mission he
was ready for him.
80" he interrupted fiercely before the
youth had said wv words, 'you want mt
to let you marry my daughter, do your"
The young man got his second wind on
the first jump.
VI didn't say so, did II" he asked coolly.
The old gentleman gasped.
But you were going to say so?" he in.
sisted.
WHO told you l was9" inquired the an
plicant, seeing his advantage.
But you want me to let you marry her.
don't your" asked the old gentleman, soft.
ening.
"No,"
mop" and the old gentleman almost fell
off his chair.
That's what l said"
The old gentleman thought he had made
a mistake.
"Then what in thunder do you want?" he
exclaimed.
want you to give your consent" re-
piled the youth pleasantly. "I'm going to
marry her anyhow, but we thought your
consent wouldn't be a bad thing to have as
a starter"
1t took the old gentleman a minute to re-
cover his equilibrium. When he did, he
put out his hand.
Shake, my boy" he said. 1--WE been
looking for a son-in-law with some sand in
his craw, and l guess you'll do."-Detroit
Free Press.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
OF Course.

The silence of the forest was about them,
There were also ant hills, but they were toe
far away to cut any figure.
She drew her mantle more closely about
her slender form and shivered.
The best literature goes to show that
there was nothing unusual or outre in the
proceeding.
He glared fiercely at the tuft of moss on
a ~neighboring eak.
AHA" he Kissed, II shall take nv life"
She spake not in reply.
DO you not think" he demanded, that
with your heart cold toward me, / were
better deadf"
She sighed.
Yes, Mr.. Dink~insnooper," she said, and
her voice was like the gentle purling of the
brook, "if it's warmth you're after, | dare
say you are right"
A throstle in the ne~ighboring thicket
emitted a loud and d~issonant note.
Presently they might have been seen hur-
rying silently hence.-Detroit News-Trib-
une.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
Paid In Her Own Coin,

brooklyn lady, living on the heights,
found out to her cost recently that il il
not always wise to criticise the seeming
neglect of others.
calling not long ago upon n somewhat
eccentric neighDor, who is knownto DOS.
sess a very keen wit and a sharp tongue,
she found her neighbor out.
She waited in the parlor a few mo-
ments, however, while the servant went
up stairs to get a book. An old fashioned
rosewood piano stood in one corner of
the room, which had not received a much
needed touch of dust brush that morn
ing.
Upon the top of this the visitor traced
for the servants benefit the not particu-
larly polite word, "slattern." Shortly
afterward she left without meeting the
eccentric person.
A few days later she CHANGED to meet
the nelghbor in the street, to whom she
remarked. II called to see you the other
day but you Were out. l hope the girl
told you, for left no card"
"Oh, but you are mistaken. - replied
she of the sharp tongue. 81 knew you
called, for ! found your card on the
piano.'-New York Herald.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17

Toward the end of the fourteenth CEN
fury arose the practice of carrying a
waxen ef1igy Of the deceased either on
or before the coffin in the funeral pro-
cession. The earliest instance of this
practice is in the case of King Henry V,
whose effigy formed the first of those fig
ures which are still preserved in West
minister abbey. This custom was only
observed in the case of royalty and per-
sons of high position. The expense of a
waxen representation of the deceased
would prevent poor people from follow
ing it. The waxen effigy of Oliver Crom-
well lay in state while the body itself
was being embalmed, so that most prob
ably the actual corpse was never exposed
to public view. The practice appears to
have been discontinued shortly after the
Westminster Gazette.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17

A young and newly married couple were
entertaining their friends, and among the
guests was one whose continued rudeness
made him extremely Objectionable to the
rest of the company. His conduct, although
most unbearable, was put up with for some
time, until at supper he held up on his fork
a piece of meat which had been served to
nm, and in a vein of intended humor he
looked round and remarked, as this pig?"
which Immediately drew forth the remark
from a quiet looking individual sitting at
the other end of the table, (Which end of
the fork do you refer to2"-Tit-Bits.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
Proud of His Handiwork,

What a complexion!" enthusiastically
remarked one of a group standing ON a
street corner in a n%eighboring city recently
as a well dressed woman approached.
"Ah, there's nothing to beat that in this
town." he continued. II tell you Pm
proud of That woman"
why soY" asked a stranger who was one
OF the party. us the woman a relative CT
yoursf"
"Oh, no."
Then why do you rave so over the COM
plexion?'
Why, sir" said the first speaker, II sold
IL to her myself. / am the druggist who
makes it."-New York Herald.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
Moral Safety.

Deacon Lightfoot and Deacon Olmstead
were brother officers in the same colored
church in a Kentucky town, and while the
former was fond of slipping around a
smokehouse in the nighttime the latter had
a hankering for chicken coops. One day
they met on the street.
Look ii heah, Brer Olmstead," said
LightfGot warningly, you is got ter be mo-
keerful how you fool round dem hencoops.
you is"
Deacon Oimstead was greatly shocked.
"Whaifur you talk like dat ter me. Brer
Lightfcoti" he responded. Il spec faint
no wussen stealth meat"
"Huh!' said the other. You doan kno'
what you talkin about. Eff you steal a
chicken, de chickens gwinter holler, an
you is gwinter git shot an bring reproach
on de church, but who ebber heah a ham
holler?" and with this knockout CUR
Brer Lightfoot passed on.-Detroit Free
Press.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17

LOST IN TEXAS SWAMPS.
n Experience of a Ratified Hunter Who
Was Loaded Down with Game.

Ihe Experience of a Ratified Hunter Who
Was Loaded Down With Game.
Fully 40 men started out from this
place Saturday afternoon to shoot ducks.
and n n party was Charley Aims
worth, a married man, who has resided
here for a year and a half. Ainsworth
got separated from the rest of the party,
u the game was so plentiful that by 4
o'clock he had bagged twelve ducks and
n brant, and thinking he had as many
birds as he needed, concluded he would
return home. He was probably less
than three miles from home at that
time, but the rushes We're so high that
he could not see the tall smokestacks at
the mills, and before the sun went down
he lost his reckoning. Not returning
home at night, his wife became alarmed,
and at daylight Sunday morning a party
OF II took a boat and pulled down the
river n up Conway's bayou, where
they found Ainsworth's boat pulled up
on the shore. Twelve men started into
the marshes to find the lost man, but
mel with no success.
Between a and 5 o'clock Sunday after
o Ainsworth walked into town quite
exhausted, having wandered all Satur-
DAY afternoon, all that night and the
wholeof Sunday in water from 6 inches to
2 feet deep, where the rushes were 10 feet
high and so thick he could not see three
feet before him, with the rattle of count
less fiocks of ducks passing overhead,
the doleful music of the lonely bullfrogs
n the hoarse, dull, deep bass roar of
the hundreds of alligators that abound
in the dark and muddy wallows. All
through these low marshes he wandered.
knowing that he had a sick wife at home,
whose anxiety would increase with ev-
cry hour that he was delayed, and with
the weight Of the game he had killed
to his gun and cartridges. He had
nothing to eat sinceS Saturday at dinner.
he had no idea of the course he was 90
ing or what direction he was from home.
lie wandered, by the merest accident, to
the river bank, which he followed for
several hours, and finally crossed over
on the timber and booms to the Texas
SIDE, nine miles above town, and came
down home without knowing positively
whether he was going to or from Orange.
AS soon as he got to the bank of the
river he threw his ducks away, thus re-
lleving himself of 80 pounds of burden
that he had forgotten he was ~incunber-
ed with.
Those who went in search of the lost
hunter returned Sunday in response to
a signal announcing Ainsworth's return.
Orange (Tex.) Letter.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
A CASE.
After Pulling All the Strings, the Barbe,
Gives 1t Up.

Gives 1t Up.
His wife bad told him that he needed il
badly, and after thinking it over for a week
he decided to have his hair cut.
lie had been sitting in the barber chail
Tor the last half hour. All those little at.
tentions for which BARRIERS have become
noted had been showered upon him with
lavish hand and tireless tongue. The bar.
Der laid down his scissors.
A deep drawn sigh of ineffable relief an
peared to come up out of the innermost up
holstering of the chair, for the little man
fancied the ordeal was nearing it's end.
Then through half closed lids he saw the
barber arm himself with a long haired
brush. Memories of the past were waited
back to him, and shutting his eyes he
groaned aloud and shuddered.
"Pomatum on your hair, sir?'' inquired
the barber in his oiliest tones as he iabbed
the long haired implement of torture down
the little mans back and wiggled it around
in a manner particularly exasperating.
NO, sir. | never use the stuff" snapped
the victim, with a look of disgust.
"A shave, sir!" suggested the barber in
an offhand way as he slammed a greasy
hand familiarly over the little mans
mouth and proceeded to pat his face affec-
tionately with a sloppy towel.
"No, sir. Thank heaven, | shave nv
selfN' came the reply in a voice trembling
with indignation.
~"Shampoo?" continued the barber. with
dogged perseverance, as he muffled up the
little mans head in a hot towel.
Moo. Heaven forbidl' came the half
smothered answer.
"Or sea foam, sir?" went on the ner-
sistent barber as he fondled the throbbing
head between his clammy hands.
mo, no! Nothing!" gurgled a faint voice
in reply.
you'll want a bath, sir?" exclaimed the
barber after a lapse of a few moments, in a
brisk, businesslike tone, as though he were
commencing all over again.
mo, sir; l won't. rve n bath in my own
house, quickly rejoined the little man,
shaking himself defiantly and putting like
a donkey engine.
'Shoe shine'" laconically suggested the
barber.
NO, no! shine my own shoes always!"
fairly shrieked the little man testify MS he
wiggled to get free.
Before you go, sir" softly whispered
the barber in a confidential and persuasive
tone as he combed the little mans hair in
a manner that was almost tender, II would
like to sell you a bottle of my patent hair
restorative. Your hair, sir, is coming out
by the handful"
II know it isl" shouted the little man
gleefully, land Pm glad of it.. I've been
using Jinks' Hair Remover for the past
live years, and | hope soon, sir, to nave no
need of your services whatever"
Yes, sir" answered the barber in a
dreamy, mechanical way as he released
the victim from his clutches. "N-e-x-tw
PUCK.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
lncOntestable.

Tutter-What a bright boy you have
Mrs. Twickenham. l don't think | eve,
saw such a precocious youth. Think he
is going to make a great name for him.
self some day.
Mrs. Twickenham-Yes, Clifford is
rather remarkable in some respects. al.
though we try not to let him know it.
Tutter-Remarkable! Why, l tell YOU
he is a positive genius.
Mrs. Twickenham - That is hardly
possible, Mr.. Tutter. He must have
some inheritance Of this sort, You know,
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
Business ABILITY.

"Has Bykins paid you the S. he owes
your
eyes"
"Tm glad to hear it,"
IL was glad for an hour or two. Do
you know that man is a born f~inancier?'
what makes you think so?"
HE paid me S. in the morning, and
established confidence to such a degree
that he borrowed $40 that afternoon,"-
Washington Star.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17

After leading carefully up to the subject
the teacher of the class in the Waits Mis-.
sion Sunday school felt confident he had
made an impression on Snub Nosed Mike,
the bootblack.
And now, Nike" he said, adapting his
style OF talk to the vocabulary of the class,
what sort of kid do you think go to heav-
en-"
dead ones" answered Snub Nosed Mike
solemnly.
And the moral lecture ended right there.
Chicago Tribune.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17

The late Marshal MacMahon was not
a good offhand speaker. There was q
colored cadet in the Saint Cyr Military
academy, and once when the marshal
reviewed the corps the instructor sup-
gested that he should say something to
encourage the black man.
Let him stand FORTH" said the mar
shall.
80 you are a darby, are your he said
to the cadet.
Eyes, marshall
"Well keep it up."-Argonaut.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
No. 3i06.
Application for a Patent.
Y. $. Land Office.

U. s. Land Office.
Helena, Montana, January II. 1904.
Nttice Is hereby given that the Hudson Mining
Company, by Thomas G. Simpson its duly an,
thoriZed agent whose Post Office address is Mel
hart. Montana, has this day filed application
for Patent, under the mining laws of COngress
for 31l linear feet of the
HUDSON LODE
designated as survey number 4313, situated in
Montana (unorganiZed) mining district, Meagb-
er county. Montana, in unsurveyed township ID
north range = east, which claim is recorded i'm
the Office of the Recorder of Meagher county. nj
White Sulphur Springs, Montana, and described
as follows:
Said survey number 4313 beginning at corner
number l. from which the Initial Point number 2
township ID north range s or 8 east bears s0uth
- degrees 43 minutes 30 seconds west Ig49.5 feet:
thence south 66 degrees 4S minutes east 445 4 feet
to corner number 2: thence south l degree 81
minutes cas-! 1855 feet to corner number q.
thence north ~ deg rees 30 minutes west I4. o feet
to corner number 4. which is also corner nrm-
Der 3 survey number 2052: thence south IL dec
rees ~ minutes west 1913 feet to corner number &:
lhence north G6 degrees az minutes west 1865
feet to corner number g: thence north 6 degrees
80 minutes east 3il feet to corner number / the
place OF beginning, embracing 3.O6 acres, upon
winch a notice OF said application was posted
the 18th day of January. 1894.
me adjoining claims 10 these premises on the
survey number 1851, Mountain Chief Lode, on
Inc South survey number 2052, May Lode, also
on the south. Kirby Lode. unsuryeyed.
S. A.. SWIGGETT,
Register.
Date of first publication Jan q, '94.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
A Martyr to His Ideas,

Is the young man sick?
He is very sick.
Does the young man wish he were deadf
He would If hshad ambition enough.
What is the matter with him?
He has been smoking pipe on the street.
And doesn't he smoke it at home?
No, indeed. He detests it.
Then why did he smoke it on the street?
Because it's English, We know.-Detroit
Tribune.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17

and (smillng) neither OF his parents laws
claim to anything
1utter-But, my Gear madam. that
hasn't anything to do with it. Wbv
enthusiastically, some of the greatest
genluses the world has ever seen have
sprung from the commonest peonle
New York Press.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
Getting 1t Through His Head.
The Dear Child.
Brooklyn Life.

Little Mabel-Ethel must think you're
lots better than any of her other beauX.
Mr. Spoonaway (gratified and b~lushing)-
Why, dear?
Little Mabel-Because she lets me stay
IN the room when you call, an she don't
when the others call.-Chicago Record.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
In Ignorance.

Featherstone (waiting for Miss Slimson
to come down)-Willy, that clock of yours
is half an hour fast.
Willy-You'd better not tell sister so.
Featherstone-Why not?
Willy-'Cause she thinks you don't know
it.-Puck.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
The WAY They Do.

Papa won't buy me a bow wowr' cried
the little daughter of a very rich man.
Don't cry, DEAR" said the mother sooth-
lngly. when you are grown, he will buy
you a puppy with a title. "-Detroit Free
Press.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
A New Departure.

Agent-The janitor will supply you with
coal.
Mr.. misunderstanding Jupiter! What
an innovation! Everywhere else l have al
ways supplied the janitor.-New York Her.
aid.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
A Mistake.

Male Passenger standing in street carr
Madam, you are standing on my foot.
Female Passenger (sweetly)-Beg pardon,
sir. l thought it belonged to the man sit.
ting down.-Truth.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17

Bounce-W What's the matter with your
sealskin cap? It's a faded ruin.
Jounce-Oh, that's my wife's work.
she's been saving it from the moths with
various chemicals.-Chicago Record.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
Knew Him at Once,

Bond-Do you know hat manp He is a
typical millionaire.
The Waiter-I dunno him, sab, but you's
right. His limit is err me.-BrOoklyn Life.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
The Only One.

Amy sleeping apartments in the club
you belong tor
B-Not one except the reading ROOM
Tit-Bits.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
One Boys Idea.

Minister-Tommy, what is happiness.
Tommy (promptly)-It's when you're
eatin.--Truth.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
Our Craze For Biguess.

The craze for "bigness' evidences
itself in many ways in the United States.
Enormously high buildings are now be-
coming a dangerous mania. The Cham
Der of Commerce in New York is 200
feet high; but, great as that height
seems, 1t is only a comparatively lofty
structure. The Masonic temple is 27O
feet high and has no fewer than 20
stories. There are several that come
near to this, but the Manhattan Life
Assurance company's building will be
the highest in America, for though it is
to contain two stories less than are
found in the Masonic temple-only IS,
that is to say-it will be $50 feet from
roof to pavement
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17
No Chance For Tomm,

Visitor lat dinner)-Aren't you going to
eat any more, Tommy?
Tommy-No'm, l guess not. Mamma
said wasn't to nave any if you took it
twice. Chicago Herald.
The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-03-17

AN ARTIST WHO PAINTS MONEY LIKE
THE REAL THING.

A Soldier, Socialist, Artist and Jon. ,aIjst
and He Has n Hobby-His Great Regard
For fredericksburg of His Remarkable
Paintings Described.
The Banner-Democrat. [volume] (Lake Providence, East Carroll Parish, La.) 1892-current, 1894-05-19
CONGRESSMAN BoATNER'S
WITHDRAWAL.

The sudden Withdrawal OF Hon.
G. j. Boatner from the Senatorial
race was as Surprising as 1t was I'M
looked for. But as politics IS
very strange thing, perhaps the pub
lie IS not SO much surprised after
all. Mr.. Boatner had made man
ly fight and up to the very assem-
bly, of the Legislature his chgnces
were the brightest. But money
and the administration whip did
the work, and Mr.. Boatner's friends
withdrew his name, beng unwilling
TO see hin merc,llessly slaughtered.
His withdrawal was manly, as has
been his past political career. Z.
]. Boatner will always be in the
ranks of integrity.
We refrain from any criticism
this week. All we can say IS, that
money and the administration have
carried the day. By combinations
Mr.. Boatner was beaten.
The Banner-Democrat. [volume] (Lake Providence, East Carroll Parish, La.) 1892-current, 1894-05-19

We commented last week on the
way the New Orleans merchants
were losing trade. This week we
see by the Natchez papers that the
steamer C. D. Shaw left Natchez on
last Sunday evening, under charter
of the merchants of that place,
laden with merchandise for the
Atchafalaya, Bayou DIES Glaise, and
BAYOU CourtabIeau. The st. Louis
Republic Of the 9th tells also that
The Cherokee was chartered and
brought TO the landing on that day
to be freighted by the wholesale
house of Bodenheim, Landau d Co.,
for Red River. This makes the
fifth boat leaving St. Louis this
spring with products and merchan
disc that New Orleans should have
sold.
The Banner-Democrat. [volume] (Lake Providence, East Carroll Parish, La.) 1892-current, 1894-05-19

The Jackson correspondent to the
Picayune had lately an interesting
paragraph, that our young men
might read with a great deal Of
profit to themselves:
Young man, stop swearing. 1t is
an idle, vulgar habit. Any free
nigger or barroom BLACKBOARD can
beat you and give you two in the
game. Besides it is inexcusable.
There IS nothing in it.
The gambler plays for the stake
he hopes to win, and for the infat-
nation, the excitement the spor,
brings. The dipsomatic drinks fol
| the exhilaration, and the sorrow
that be hopes to bury in his cups,
But the swearer bites at the naked
hook. Leave il severely off, wasl
your mouth out with I've soap, takt
drink of apolinaris water, emitting
| the fly, bid your comrades 'sGud.
nicht, and JOY be wi You all, ans
90 home and read some instructive
book. Il will give your goot
mother and sweet sisters unspeak
liable pleasure, and set fine exam
PIE for others.
The Banner-Democrat. [volume] (Lake Providence, East Carroll Parish, La.) 1892-current, 1894-05-19
Sheriff s Sale.
state ofI,ouisiana, parish of East Carroll.
Seventh District Court-Stewart Bros

state ofI,ouisiana, parish of East Carroll,
Seventh District Court-Stewart Bros
a. Co.. VS.. w. G. McRae.-No.-.
Nv virtue of writ of Fl Fa to me di-
recfed by the Hon. Seventh District Court
aforesaid, in the above entitled cause, l
will proceed to sell at public auction, on the
Atherton plantation in East Carroll pcrishs
La, on
Saturday. the 10th of May, 1894.
between the hours prescribed by law, all
the right, title and interest OF Defendant,
". c. McRae. in aud to the following des-
eribsd property. to-wit
Stock of goods, wares. ETC.. in Anterior
store. seven mules. one horse, one colt. two
COWS and3 calves, two gray mares. one sow
and two pigs. one lot hay. one lot cotton
seed, one lot farming implements. one lot
corn. one lot wood, one lot honse furniture,
one lot peas, one buggy, seized in the above
euit.
appaisement. - a.,r
sheriff's Office, Providence, La. May 9th.