The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1894-04-06
THINGS WISE AND OTHERWISE.

Figg-That dog understands ev-
erything say. Fogg-Must be an
animal Of rare intelligence. Boston
Transcript.
A welI-known bishop of the Epis-
copal church was introduced to
man who said he was Episcopal.
The bishop was evidently not much
impressed by the mans manners and
said to him: Chow shall I know
whether you are an Episcopalian OF
not" "Why ?" said the other.
'' cause / do the things that /
ought not to have done and leave un-
done the things that | ought to have
done and there is no health in me. /"
"You'll do" said the bishop.
Mr.. POrkingham You pay Mary's
new singing teacher twice as much as
you did the other one, don't you !?
Mrs. Porkingham-Yes; he's the most
celebrated teacher in the city. Mr..
Porkingham lin disgust)-Well, Ma
ry don't sing bit louder now than
she did when that cheap man was
learning her.-Puck.
Alarming Precocity: Calino, as a
friend Of the family, is introduced to
the baby, 6 months old, whose head
is adorned with few struggling locks
of light hair. ''I wish YOU much
joy" he said to The mother Of the
bantling. "Splendid child; very pre-
cocious too; why. he is nearly as bald
as his father. ."-Courier de PEurope
Charles Dudley Warner lives in
Hartford, next door to Mark Twain,
upon whom be called ono day and in.
vited him to walk. The humorist
was inclined to refuse the invitation,
whereupon Warner cited scriptural
authority in support of his request,
quoting Matthew, ", Al: "And who
soever shall compel thee to 90 mile,
go with him, Twain"
Blighted Ambition "No," said
farmer Corntossel's wife, "fame ain't
fur everybody. There's Josiar. He
done his best. but he never will get
famous. " "What was his ambi ionT
"Ter get his picter in the paper. lie
set up nights tryin' ter think Of some
ailment ter take patent medicine fur,
but he was so oyerpowerin' healthy
that they wusn't a single thing fur
i'm ter git cured Of. ."-Washington
Star.
Expelling a Refractory Scholar
''You boys are very quiet out there
in that barn." called out Willie's
mother, suspiciously. "Yes'm." re-
sponded Willie, opening the back
door and gently urging out into the
alley large yellow dog with a tin
can tied to its tail. "We're playin'
Sunday schoolp-Chicago Tribune.
Elderly Maiden-This is so unex-
pected, Mr.. Wellalong, that-that
yOu must give me time. Elderly Low
er-Time, Miss Rebecca Do you
think there is any to spare?-Chicago |
Tribune.
Pleasant News for Hicks 81
nearly died of ennui while / was off |
with Hicks" said the mind-reader.
"What was the matter ?'' "rhere
was not much to do and nothing to
read. ."-Harper's Bazar.
Night in the City.
These fringes of lamplight, strug.
Cling up through smoke and thous-
and-fold exhalation, some fathoms
into the ancient reign Of night, what
thinks Bodies of them, ,as he leads his
hunting dogs over the zenith in their
leash Of sidereal fire ? That stiied
hum of midnight, when Traffic has
lain down to rest ; and the chariot
wheels Of Vanity, still rolling here
and there through distant streets, are
bearing her to halls rooted in, and
lighted to the due pitch for her; and
only vice and misery, to prowl or to
moan like nightbirds, are abroad
that hum, say, like the stertorOus,
unquiet slumber Of sick life, is heard
in Heavenl
Oh, under that hideous coverlet Of
vapors and putrefactions, and unim-
agiuable gases, what a fermenting-
vat lies simmering and hidl The JOY
ful and the sorrowful are there; men
are dying there, men are being born;
men are praying,-on the one side of
a brick partition, men are cursing
and around them all is the vast, void
night. The proud grandee still lin
gers in bis perfnmed saloons, or re-
poses within damask curtains; wretch
sdness covers into obscure truckle-
beds, or shivers hnnger-stricken into
1is lair of straw f; in obscure cellars
rouge ct Roir languidly emits its voice
# destiny TO haggard, hungry vii
aims; while councillors of state sit
and playing their high ;
shess-gam whereof the pawns are
men. The lover whispers bis mistress
hat the coach is ready; and she, fnll 4.
of hope and fear, glides down, to fly
With him over the borders; the thief,
still more silently, sets-to his pick
ocks and crowbars. or Turks in wait
i'll the watchmen first snore in their
boxes. GAY mansions, with supper
rooms and dancing-rooms. are full Of
light and music and high-swelling
hearts; but, in the condemned cells,
he pulse Of life beats trcmnlous and
'aint. and blood-Ehot owes look ont