Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1894-08-25
DUMMIES IN STORES.
Stranger Wants to Know VII
Questions Are Not Answered.

Stranger Wants to Know Why
Questions Are'N Answered.
To the Editor Of The Evening Star:
have always had a grudge against peo-
pie who parade their complaints In the COL
umns Of The Star, wondering that you
made room for the "croakers," as dubbed
them. but I find the surest way to call at
tention to a fact is to put 1t where all may
see. therefore / selected your paper. i am
a stranger In a strange land, SO expect
my words to be more forcible. Your city
find charming in almost every respect: es-
pecially do 1 admire the courtesy with
which any information is extended by old
and young. rich and poor; but my one CHIEF
objection lies just where a woman generally
desires to find pleasure unalloyed, viz, In
the attractive stores of a large city. Now
know the Washingtonians are not only up
to date" but way past II with regard to all
modern conveniences, newest inventions,
&C, but for the life of me / cannot tell why
your stores should be ornamented with
wooden figures instead of real live employees
Let me tell You how green l was. 1 wanted
some lace. and going to the counter I ex-
amined the quality of a pretty piece Look
ing up to the figure before me / sweetly
asked: What is the price of this?' The
black eyes stared blankly at my hat, the
rosebud mouth moved not muscle-nothing
indicated life. Pardon" / repeated; what
is the price of this?" but, to my astonish-
ment. no answer. 1 passed out, thinking II
queer to employ a mute. Several squares
1urther 1 entered another well-known es-
tablishment, and again I stopped at a lace
counter; picking up piece, 4 inquired of
the ultra-looking person behird the counter:
How do YOU sell this?" thinking perhaps
what is the price of this?" might In this
advanced town be an untranslatsble idiom
Imagine my bewilderment when the figure
sudoenly 1erked Its jeweled fingers up and
down the counter as IL on a piano, and
tossing Its little head with hair parted
from side to side, sweetly and with spright-
illness hummed the gay Liberty Bell" but
with that monotonous wound-up manner
which Indicates Mrs. Jarley's wax works
In sore perplexfty L gave UP the lace and
In a state OF uncertainty approached an
OBJECT strongly resembling a man and
timidly inquired for certain article but
hardly had 1 uttered the last syllable than
a button must have been pressed, for out
came tumbling this remarkable sentence in
a weird monotone: "NodressGoods thirdfioor-
taketheelevator" But did L? No L fed
Vowins that 1 would make one more at
tempt, and II i found another automaton
l would walt on myself, and that most
literally. After brisk walk-almost a
rum found myself in another large and
popular store. When 1 recovered sufficient
breath cautiously advanced to the counter
and Inquired If i could get a handkerchief
A neatly dressed person. with a gentle
voice. responded: "Oh. yes. here is a pretty
one , ana and this his. Is very fine one. So you
change; thank you," and then I rode home
and went TO bed: this last proved too great
a shock. My friends insist that the figures
except the last mentionedD We're in reality
wooden figures. and were invented ,narciy
TO amuse customers, but 1 will confide in
you what they will learn only from this
communication, l. e., have since observed
that when some gentlemen came to those
same figures to be waited upon the blank
stare became tender glance the rigid Inns
curved and dimpled with each caressing re-
ply. In fine. / concluded that those same
We're ngures or the most laudable dis
elimination. Can II be that il is customary
to tip" the store ladies? Then welcome
free trade for 1t will surely correct this
abuse. n. T.