The Camden chronicle. (Camden, Tenn.) 1890-current, 1894-03-30
HUMOR OF THE DAY.


A spark ofgenius Winning an heir
css. Truth.
The man who agrees with us doesn't
come around near often enough. 49,
RAMS Horn.
The stock exchange is where hope is
exchanged for experience. -Florida
Times-Unicn.
A man with an elastic imagination |
is too liable to use it for a conscience.
Rochester Democrat.
This is q world of compeDsations-
men who lack long heads generally
have long faces. Truth
The worst of the rosy colors in
which some things are painted is that
they are not fast.-Puck.
Glow much is this dress worth?'
81 really don't know what it's worth
the price is S3."--Hallo.
The pen may be mightier than the
sword, but it's the uniform that takes
young women's es,-Judge.
Johnny, add seven apples to two
apples, and what will You have?'
Collie, sir. "-Harper's Bazaar,
A dogs tail is not necessarily "has
been" because it always points to the
past. --Bimghamton Republican,
One reason why some men are so
lean is because they have thrown all
their fet into the fire. Dallas News,
Tommy with pride)-''My pas a
banker" WilIio-"An' my pas re-
ceiver for his bank. "-ChicOgo Rec
ord.
"Thc foreign husbands the absorb
ing idea :" said the American million
aire as he wrote the wedding check. -
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
He-'Do you believe in such a
thing as love at first sight," She
"Certainly. \ hasty glance does
not discover impcrfections. Boston
Transcript.
Hungry Higgins - "Wots right
nowadays tank you, or t'anks?'
Weary Watkins Il guess tanks
would hit us about right. '--lndionap-
oils journal
The man who is always careful to
keep out of debt is seldom so well
supplied with the modern convent
cnces of life a. his less considerate
llow.-Puck.
He-''What would you do if l were
to kiss you?" She-"Are You very
curious to know" He-"Very I"
She--"Well, you might try and see I"
Boston Traveller.
cit makes no difference to me- said
the old theologian, whether came
from tadpole or monkey. How to
get out of the scrape is what bothers
me. Newport News.
In the cannibal islands. Mother
"What is the matter with you, my
son? Have you eaten anything that
disagreed with you?" Son--"That il
why l ate him." Boston Transcript.
Tommy "I guess he must be tho
best dentist in town" Papa Didn't
he hurt you?" Tommy--"No; ] just
went up to the door and my tooth
stopped hurting "--ChicaSo Inter
Ocean.
Odd you get anything from that
man you just applied to for help?"
only good advice" "What advice
did he give you!" 81 said | was cold
and be told mo to go TO bla2es -
New York Press.
The scarcity of food in Bage has
compelled the beseiged troops to re
sort to CANNES dished up in various
styles. There is havoc among the
dogs Of war in that locality. -Phila-
dclphia Ledger.
First Belle--"Then both Herr
Schulze and Herr Lehman had made
her an offer of marriage; which was
the lucky man?" Second Ditto Herr
Schulze, Herr Lehman married her. "
--Oberlander Bote.
"Have You had your new house in
sured, Mrs. Dwight" yes ''Yom
husband is afraid of fire, then?"
Mercy, yes; he will leave the house
any time before he will make one. -
Chicago Inter Ocean.
"How do you know that DeYere is
not in love with Mabel Swectbriar?'
because | heard him tell her the
other evening, when they came from
church, that he knew of short cut
home. Detroit Free Press.
"Did you know that Miss Bjones
was going to marry young Smith," 81
know it but cannot understand how
girl as intelligent as she is can con-
sent To marry a man stnnid ennnrh tn