St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1894-11-10
THE cHEEaFUC CALLER.
and Tact u the Exchange q
Soeinl CooEteslee.

THE cHEERFUC CALLER.
osseso~s.sss and Ts~t = the Exchange u
Social Coersesles.
No social pleasure isenjoyed 50 sadly
by the average woman as that OF pay
ing calls. And the worst Of il is, she
is at no pains to dissemble her sadness
Nine tines out Of ten she tells the
friends On whom she is calling that she
has been meaning to come and see her
this long time, but it is so hard to get
started. And then she goes ON to say
that 1T is such an effort to pay calls.
and her list is 50 large, ami she is ap.
palled when she thinks of the calls she
owes, and she never likes to make very
formal" calls, and 50 she does not ac-
,complished anything to speak Of In an
afternoon; some ladies whom she.
knows land evidently envies) can make
twenty visits in one day, but she can
not Then she says, rs she takes her
leave:
.Now, please, do not be so long
about coming to 80 ME did not
mean to be 50 slow, but waited for
my cousin to como with me- 1t seems
20 much easier to pay calls with soma
one. / love to see my friends at my
home, but must confess that make
hard work Of going. visiting myself Do
come soon."
Such speeches state. in more Or less
plain terms, that the visitor finds call
ing . stiff, dull. burdensome task; but
NO offense is meant and generally mono
is taken. Nevertheless it is . breach
of politeness to tell your hostess that
that you have so much else to do that
you can hardly make it convenient to
visit her, or that, while it was almost
too much trouble to go 10 see her, you
expect her to be more energetic about
coming to see you, or words to this. ef-
feet
fa courtesy is worth paying 1T an
it is worth paying gracefully and gra-
ciously. The woman who realizes this
has mastered an important secret 81
social popularity. When paying visit
she does it cheerfully and brightly.
She does not apologize for not having
come before, in the mistaken idea that
this sounds friendly and cordial. She
is sufficiently desirous Of being friendly
and cordial to take. pains to say the
right thing. A few moments study of
her hostess tells her what are some Of
the lady's present interests. cares or
tastes, and it is easy to say q sympa-
thetic, pleasant word about them. If
she feels in her heart that she has been
remiss in delaying the visit, she says to
herself that actions speak louder than
words. accordingly she makes no..ex-
cuses, but extends to her friend some !.
pleasant invitation or other attention
She acts As if the visit were pleas
ure to her, and she makes it . pleasure
to her hostess. She does not discuss
the effort that it II to make calls, or
the hired girls lapses from ideal stsnd- ;
ards of cooking and conduct or her
husbands dyspepsia, with its: uSual
and distressing symptoms, or the trials
of spring house-cleaning. :. Not that
she avoids commonplace subjects, she
knows that they are universally inter
esting, but she tries TO seize upon the
original and entertaining side of them,
and when the commonplace details Of
. commonplace subject are interesting
to no one but herself she has the sense
to realize it, and not to tire any one
with them. She deserves and wins I'd.
miration and friends, because she il
cheerful and interesting. OF course,
not every woman can be cheerful and
but women fail in those
qualities far more eften from lack Of
effort than from lack of. natural gifta
One would not think of giving =
present and saying: 1T was :. good
deal of trouble to go down town TO get
this," or II had to economic . long
time before could buy this" or u
meant to have given you this little
present = long time sgo, but conld
not find time to attend to ii, " heNeyer
true these things might be. There il
no excuse for making equally ungEA-
cious speeches about paying ca1ls. Any
social courtesy should b. given in the
same spirit in which one makes gift.
II it has cost us something, it is moro
generous and dignifed to say nothing
shout it.
Think it over, sister women, and do
not consider . round of visits to your
woman friends . tedious, burdensome
but make the visits with
} determination to find and give pleas
ure.
Effort and common sense and kind
ness Of heart are necessary for the ex-
prcise Of tact There is mot much ex-
:use for . lack of it, and it is its own
reward, for it wins and holds friends
md makes sunshine in the heart from
which it springs, and in the hearts
which feel its gentle, almost impercept-
ible touch. Education in polite rules
Is good, but tact is an infallible guide,
Tor it is equal to emergencies where es-
Eablished rules fail. The tactful per-
ION does not err in the mere forms Of
politeness because he is guided by the
true hne spirit Of it.-Alice L. Clark, in
n. Y. Ledger.
Latest Esd In C1shBoas.
Not only fashions, but common sense
md experience, too, have decreed that
The softest and most luxurious filing
Tor . sofa cushion is the down Of milk
weed pods The farmers will no long
u be troubled with the multiplying of