The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1894-09-12
HUMOROUS.
ain with the beesl
Atlanta Constitution.

Dy the sunshine OF prosperity many
people are sunstruck.
If agirl is homely, IL is safe to as
sert that she is great deal of help to
her mother.
One of the hardest lessons to learn
is that we are made out of the same
kind of clay as other folks
'Bankley is taking great interest
in music these days" 'Is he study
ing the pianoP" "No; the baby"
He-If I should propose to you.
what would be the outcome? She-It
would depend entirely on the income.
Jack-What are you going to take up
as your career-law medicine, or what?
Wild Marigold-Matrimony, think.
Sweet Sixteen-Do tell me, Elsa,
when my accepted lover asks for tho
first kiss, how many shall give
him?
He-Will you think of me when I'm
gone? She (ynwningly)-Yes, Mr..
Staylate, if you will give me an oppor-
tunity.
"Theres ring around the moon,"
He wispered In lovers glee;
She sighed, and murmured dreamily,
''IIow happy the moon must be-"
First Drummer-Say, business is
looking right up again, isn't it? Sec
ond Drummer-Weil, it ought to; it's
fiat on its back.
81 saw very curious thing today"
"What was it?" "a woman driving a
nail with hammer instead of with the
best hair brush"
Mr.. Smallwort (sleepily)-What is
the matter dear? Was / snoring? Mrs.
Smallwort-No, you we're not That's
what made me wake.
Uncle-So You have several debts Of
honor, Ell? Come, tell me honestly
how much you owe. Nephew-Just
as much as you are able to pay,
uncle.
The following appears in a small
provincial paper: "The bridegroom's
present to the bride was a handsome
brooch, besides many other beautiful
things in cut glass"
At country summer resort. Will
bur-Do they always keep that big
bell on the COW? Papa-Yes, Wilbur.
Wilbur suppose it is to keep her
from falling asleep in this quiet place.
Who steals my purse steals trash
So on my feelings never tramples.
But he Who steals my wifes purse steals
A wonderous lot OF samples!
"There are no flies on me" said the
fresh young man, with idiotic gayety.
"No," said the sedate girl, with an air
of great thoughtfulness, 81 suppose
they are some things even flies can't
stand.
He was countryman, and he walked
along busy thoroughfare and read
sign over the door OF manufacturing
establishment: ''Cast-iron Sinks. 1t
made him mad. He said that any foo
ought to know that.
Mrs. Liteheart-My husband gave
me some money this morning, Mrs.
Spendit-And are you going shopping
today? Mrs. L.-No indeed no shop
ping for me today. Lam going down
town to buy something.
"Yes, should like to have seen my
daughter married this fall, but I'm
afraid il can't be-" said the lady on the
summer-resort piazza. ''Why not?"
said the lady next her. ''Why, you
see, the foolish girls gone and got her.
self engaged"
Mamma-Well Tommy, did you
give the poor dog his medicine while
1 was away? Tommy-Yes ma I
read receipt, and it said the COM
pound could be mixed on an old
broken dish. couldn't find such u
dish, so had to break one.
William NJ. Evarts. being at the top
of Mount Washington, began speech,
which the crowd of visitors had begged
from him, with this felicitous pun
: "We are not strangers We are friends
5 and neighbors. We have all been born
and brought up here!"