Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1894-04-26
AT WAR WITH HERSELF.
The Story Of a WOman's AtOnement,
by Charlotte NJ. Braeme.
CHAPTER XxxvI-Continued.


He was satisfied: he was beside him
self with Joy that she had voluntarily
given him this little caress-she who
was so distant and reserved. Her man
ner had often puzzled him. He had no
right to doubt her, yet there was some
thing "a strange about her conduct
She seemed always as though she were
trying to make amends TO him for
something's though all her affection
and Kindness came from a desire to
make atonement. He could not UNDER
stand her. She had never wronged
him; IL was not her fault that she was
the nearest OF kin. There was no rea-
son why she should accept lin II she
did not love him. She had had offers
from some of the most distinguished
men in England, and had refused them
for his sake. She must love him after
all, but he wished that she would show
her affection in fashion that he could
better understand. He saw her often
he rode over from Weldon every
day but, in some strange kind OF
way, he never seemed to draw nearer
to her or TO understand her inner life
better than he had at first.
Ethel Dacre wa still at Crown Leigh
ton, although it was sorely against her
will tina. she remai1ed the o; but Cen
eral Dacre had gone abroad, and he
had said that he should much prefer
his daughters residing with her friend
during his absence than keeping house
all alone at Westheld Ethel could
Oher no reasonable objection, therefore
she remained.
=
One bright morning in September
Ienic stood at the library window
alone The lilies were dead, the roses
faded, and in their place great sun
flowers turned their bright faces up
ward, and tall dahias reared their
heads with hand some flowers. The
leaves were falling from the trees;
they lay crimson, brown and gold, on
theground; the wind swept them along,
and then moaned over them.
The fair face looking wistfully from
the window at the falling leaves had
changed most remarkably. 1t was not
less beautiful; but the brightness and
radiance were gone-t there was a worn
look that did not belong to youth-the
eyes were very bright, but there was
somewhat of fever in their brightness
there was u flush on the beautiful
face, but it told more of unrest than Of
healthAthe was q tremulous move-
ment about the white jeweled hands,
sudden Quivering of the lips, both
tokens OF q mind i'll at ease.
No one saw Lady Charnleigh with
niIf nam a ftly irrr fho nhaup hicu lam
plet}n had been from Kew to spend the
summer vacation, as she told the par
ents Of her pupils, with the Countess of
Cnarnleigh, of Crown Leighton, and
when she had seen Leonie, she had
cried out in wonder
sThis gay life does not suit you, Lady
Chatnleigh; you are so changed. You
look as though you had had long years
ofinoes:ant gayety want rest.
Rest" the girl had re-echoed
mourniully. "There is no rest in this
world,
And after Miss Templeton had been
there for a few days, and had noticed,
to her dismay, the fever of unrest in
which the girl lived, her surprise had
become greater still.
You cannot sleep in the dark, she
had said, one day, after overhearing a
CONVERSATION between Leonie and her
maid; you do not like the twilight
you cannot endure to be left alone, You
crave for continual excitement as chill |
dren do for locd My dear Lady Charm
leigh,GyUu give me the impression that
yoNapgat war with yourself"
How the words had tainted her.
How they tainted her still. They de-
scribe her state of mind as no other
words could have done 1t was not |
tempest not struggle, but con-
tinull war,are-and the warfare was
self against self. There was hardly a
single moment, night or day, during
which her better, nobler, higher self |
was not crying out in rebellion against |
the deed she had DONE There was
hardly a single moment in which heart |
OF soul was free from that war. She
was swayed by impulse as we're the
leaves by the wind. She would rise
one morning determined to write to
Paul Flemyng, and tell him Aide
tSflnined to undo her great wrong-to
give up the wealth she was so uniustly
keeping from him--to he honest, loyal
and true. The resolution would last
until she went downstairs and saw the
magnifcence that surrounded her.
IL cannot give it up" the unhappy
girl would say: at is the best part Of
my life l could not endure poverty
after this.
At other times, the memory of the
lover she had lost would be so strong
within her that she would be ready to
give up everything she had in the
world only to see him again. At such
times She loathcd even the name of
Paul Flemyng; she avoided seeing him
when ne came; she went out into the
green solitude of the woods and called
by name him whom she had sent from
her with lie. No wonder that the
radiant face grew worn-looking, and
that the bright eyes lost their clear
light; no wonder that sweet snatches
of song and sunny laughter were no
longer heard.
Lady Charnleigh stood watching the
falling leaves. The wind no longer
waited to her rich warm gusts OF per-
fume; it was wailing over the dead
flowers.
MY life was virtually over, she was
thinking to herself; this world has no
MOTE to give me. have lost my lover;
nor spring n " summer will ever bring
him back to me. Some time, sooner or
later, l shall marry Paul Flemyng. l
shall live and die Countess of Charm
leigh. shall live and die one of the
fairest and richest women in England.
But my lie will not have been q happy
nna thnnmh | haua INV hanrtls mish