The Neihart herald. [volume] (Neihart, Mont.) 1890-1901, 1894-05-26

on it. Dillingham; took some, shut his
eyes and seemed to be in a brown study
for a few minutes. Then he said-sort
OF slow and conservative, you under
stand-that it was the same brand of
liquor and same age, within three or
four days very likely, but he reckoned
there was just the least little taste of
leather in it.
Judge Elder couldn't sleep nights
after that. He worried over it even on
the bench, and you could see the lines of
care forming about his mouth.
FINALLY he couldn't stand it any long
er, so he told his big niger Joe to turn
out the whisky slowly and examine it
carefully and put it into another barrel.
He did SO, and, by George Harry! at
the bottom of the barrel he found a kyar-
pet tack with a leather head on it! We
don't drink much liquor, Mr.. Nye, but
were mighty particular about what it
is"
notice IN a Denver paper that a suit
for divorce has been instituted by Mrs.
Alice Oyster against Mahlon Oyster, her
husband, on the ground of infidelity.
''tb CIV i't U h1loN tIldI lie WdS
an intidel when she married him.
She little thought when she married
Mahlon in North Platte, Neb., in 1881,
that it would result in an oyster stew so
soon. At North Platte Mr.. Oyster was
regarded as a New York count. but he
turned out to be a cove, and a sly one at
that.
SO she grew cold, and learning of his
infidelity, she being a good member of
the church, she forbade Mahlon her bed
oyster bed-and board.
Nothing can be sadder than to be dis
appointed in II we love. Alice no
doubt loved Mahlon %devoutly, but he
was not what she had thought him to be
or what he represented himself. Instead
of being a blue blood, there was not even
a blue point about him. He was lust a
common cove oyster, and an infidel at
that.
He fell in love with a member of the
Goldfish ~aristocracy, and Mrs. Oyster at
once smelt a mice Lancashire humor).
He was the kind that one can get at 90
cents a can.
One little oyster II years old was the
result of this union. His name was Pat.
His schoolmates call him Oysters Patty.
That's because he's not popular in the
school, for the reason that he puts on
too many escallops.
Mrs. Oyster has always been a con-
sistent Christian-a hardshell Baptist.
hcn,e his infdelity has caused her to
consider him a bad oyster.
She has put the matter in the courts,
and through the columns of the paper
she has given him a mock roast.
She says she may have been a goose,
but not of Oysters dressing. She claims
to have maintained herself and Oysters
Patty for over five years, and she has
decided not to be a clam. She desires
absolute divorce from Mahlon and asks
also for alimony, to be paid out of his
celery.
How sad all this is to consider! To
think that for years N is an oyster,
then to find that he has been a sucker!
But enough.
This reminds me somehow-this hu-
MOI, on which l paid IS duty the other
day-of a lady acquaintance of mine
who rose in the night last week, and find
ing the room too warm opened the Win
dow n held it open by means of a
stick of stove wood. To prevent bur-
glars entering the room without alarm
ing her she used astick that still had the
bark ON it.
l am recently indulging in a nice
new smoking jacket. 1t is a gorgeous
affair. and wear it while lolling about
my room. In fact, 1 like it so well that I
have almost smoked myself into heart
disease so as to wear it. 1t has a bright
scarlet silk trimming. and lots Of times l