The gold leaf. [volume] (Henderson, N.C.) 1881-1911, 1894-08-09
THE PIOUS PARSON
AND THE UNREGENERATE OLD
RAM.


How the Former Undertook to
Conquer the Latter---Moral
Suasion Inefectual--The Par
sons Silk Tile and Personal
Anatomy Suffer in the Contest.
| 70. E. Young in Goodall's Chicago Sun. J
He was tall, slim, pale young man,
with meek and holy expression upon
his tranquil countenance. Anyone
would have supposed from his appear
ance that no wave of earthly emotion
had ever ruffled the calm and quiet
serenity of his passionless lace, for it
wore just such look as artists love to
picture upon the glorified features of
martyrs and patriarchs.
The long tailed, tight fitting, closely
buttoned black coat, the stiff mathe-
matical neck-tie, and the tall and
highly polished silk hat, all bespoke
the young minister just entered upon
his first pastorate and such indeed he
was. The devout clergyman, feeling
the need OF little relaxation from the
hours of severe study he had given to
the preparation of his sermon for the
Sunday following, had just come out
for quiet walk in the sequestered
country lane. 1t was also his inten-
ton to make pastoral call on some
of the good sisters close by, for as yet
he was without helpmeet in his labors
in the vineyard of the Lord.
1t was calm and peaceful scene
through which he passed. The tree
tops and waving grasses murmured
softly as the summer zephyrs kissed
their quivering crests, and it seemed
as if no earthly sin or sorrow could
ever mar the sweet, serene loveliness
of that tranquil spot. The divinity
of nature crowned it and all was har-
mony.
But hark The sweet and sinless
dreams of the young pastor were sud-
denly, rudely shattered. From the
pasture close by came a loud and
rapid volley of such shocking profanity
that the good mans features involun-
tarily contracted themselves into a
look of holy horror. Such language
was inexpressibly awful for the ears Of
one of the Lords annointed.
A little investigation soon revealed
the source of the profane oratory that
had SO narrowed up his feelings. A
ragged, un-burned lad cf fifteen was
safely esconced in the fork of small
elm few rods away, and around its
foot there danced and capered belli-
gerent looking old ram of most
enormous size. At him the youth in
the tree-top was still directing the
same sort Of Objectionable discourse
that had so shocked the senses of his
pious hearer.
In point of artistic excellence, the
boys swearing was seldom or never
equaled. He ran through the whole
gamut of profane epithets with almost
inconceivable rapidity, and when he
had finally exhausted his vast stock of
opprobrious terms he just went back to
the beginning and commenced all
over. The minister's blood ran cold
as he listened.
"Surely here is fitting missionary
work, right at my very hand" thought
the pious pastor SO torsaking the
shady highway and his nominations
on comining fourthly" he leaned
over the barbed wire fence of the
pasture and accosted the youthful
swearer.
"My son, why do you use such
wicked and terrible language :"
"Cause this darn ram has treed me
and won't let me so home, replied the
boy as he discharged fresh volley OF
profanity at the offending mutton.
But it does no good for you to
swear at the poor innocent sheep in
that dreadful way, and your own i'm
mortal soul is brought into danger OF
hell fire BY SO doing"
"Swear BY thunder guess you'd
swear if that old devil knocked you
krotched end up as many times as he
has me-" responded the orator up the
elm. "The boys have plagued him
till he's ready to butt anything from
a bull -grasshopper to locomotive
and III bet he'd bust the bowels righ,
out of a family monument if he gol
one good square crack at it. He's
got head like bombshell, that ram
has,
"Tne poor beast is not to blame i
he has been tormented until his dispo
sition is soured," said the minister
q" The sheep should be treated with
unfailing kindness, instead Of being
sworn at and abused. He would soon for
get his anger and become as gentle a
lamb. Wait minute and l will
come and call him away SO you car
get down. Just watch the effect o
for kindness on dumb and unreason
ing BRUTE
: "Jest look fer yerself, Elder, O
}oG IL SSl OlIC al luC OlSdIl OdShS
that'll make ye think o the PROMISED
> Land, kindness or no kindness" sait
the boy as the minister slowly ant
carefully surmounted the wire fence
reckon l know that cussed rar
better'n you do. If he does lend y
one you'll think a dead mule ha
{ kicked We en- he keerf,,l ~
= Without deigning any response t
, this we'll meant advice, the disciple {
moral suasion approached the rar
with kindness and pity shining il
bis eyes.
"Lammie, lammie! Come lammi.
come - he called in persuasive az
: cents, at the same time extending ii
right hand Of fellowship. But II
ram only shook his head angrily an
shot out surly, spiteful "Ba-aa!"
0 Come, lammie, come! Do, that