The Forrest City times., 1894-04-27

ton, N. ]. She will never hear the mis- erable jokes. ancient fowls. miscella- neous hash. debilitated coffee and fee ble tea which so many wretched land- ladies often over-hear; for her guests will be feasted on the juciest beef steaks. the tenderest chickens, the ligiiteSt bread, the flakiest pastry and other good thingstOO numerous to men, tion. She will be wise enough to know that the hearts of most men lie in their stomaclls. consequently she will not fail to profit by that Knowledge.
 Stanley Terrell will follow the ex- ample of his father and practice the ''heallng art" He will hang out his shingle in some live western town where good looking young men are at premium, and soon the girls will be | saying to one another, have you seen the new doctor Yes, and he's just splendid, think Tll get sick just to have him come to see me. The old ladies will come to him to know if he can't do something for their rheuma- 1 tiZ, one of them tells him that her son Jeems is mighty poorly, and when he asks her what the trouble is, she says I don't know, but do believe he's got the spine in his back and 1 want you to come and see if you can't take it out or scatter it. Staney's head is not turned by all this attention nor by these tlattering remarks that are repeated to him, for he means get there"whether the ladies like him or not, but at the same time knows it's best to have them on his side.
 Mattie Coffey has rural tastes, will mary Jonathan Hayseed, live on a farm convenient to some pleasant town. She will have choice fruit. plump chick ems, focks of turkeys and other fowls, but best of all promising lot of young Hayseeds. She will have gentle, meek eyed Jersey COWS and her delicious golden butter will command high price in the market. Hattie will be a model house keeper. and 1 hope she will occasionally invite me to spend a week in her delightful home. l shall accept the invitation you may be sure as Jonathan and 1 are good friends also.
 Sarah Holwell will be an old maid, a dear delightful old maid, not cross and grabbed as they are so often represented, but just such one as l have in my minds eye at this moment and is my beau idea, of an old maid. She will love cats, of course, but will love other things as we'll Children and flowers will come in for their share, and the young folks of both sexes will go to her with their love affairs and other trouMes. She will knit socks for poor old MT. Dobts who lives near her, and read by the hour to old Mrs. Hobbs who is blind, and she will be the Lady Bountisul" of her neighborhoOd.
 | While fOretellinp the future of others I have neglected to mention that am a spinster and temperance lecturer in the employ of the W. c. T. U., and having an appointments in Dallas, Texas, dnding myself in need of new bon net entered d stylish millinery estab- lishment, and who should come for ward to wait on me, but nay old friend Ethel Burnes Imagine our mutual surprise and delight. After chatting awhile, selected a love of bonnet, which Ethel insisted 1 should take at a greatly reduced price for the sake ot '-Auld Lang Syne," and then saying that she had another surprise in stoce for me, invited me into the dressmak- ing department, and there III the midst of silks, satins, velvets and faces, was the smiling face of Lizzie Martin. Fate is surely smiling upon me today, 1 said, and will you believe 1t, we all three cried. After while 1 asked llz- Eie how she liked dreSS-maklng and she replied, sometimes 1t Is real pleas ant Maggie and then again it's dreadful. Now when Miss Sensible and Mrs. Easy to- please come in with dresses to make and politely tell nae how they. want them made, trimed, etc., and then l I bAx hpat lf- isfed with the dresses when they are finished, and don't forget to pay. fox the making, then dreSs-making IS q pleasure. But when Mrs. Particular comes in with dress to make, and not the least idea h0w she wants it made. and not liking any of my sug- gestions. at last settles down on an Oxford jacket with velvet trimming. after consuming the morning, and wondering whether she would like 1t Ter not, she takes her departure, and when the dress is finished she comforts me by wishing she had had it made some other way, and trimmed 1t with something else. Then dress-making becomes torture.
 Leaving Dallas next morning l had the pleasant surprise of meeting my old school-fellow Dan Mohler on the train. He had developed into drum mer, and I soon found that he was not lacking in quantity of cheek which IS
 needed to make a successful drummer
 Dan said he was having a good time with the other drummer boys, at the expense of hls boss, and seeing life II
 it's different phases.
 My business called me to Fit. Worth
 and at my hotel table l heard gen
 tleman remark, that there was big
 show in town, and with it a celebrated | l.dy oouoctrian MadamoiSellp De