davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
.-Anyn,brella.

'Show me an umbrella" says manu-
facturer, that has holes worn in the silk
about the ring at the top, while the body
of the material is still intact throughout,
and will show you the owner of an UNI
brella who doesn't deserve to own one.
if it is good one. And show me an UNI
brella that has holes in along the ribs be-
fore natural use of it should make them
come there, and will show you an own
er who carries his umbrella more for the
sake of appearance than for utility"
A wet umbrella placed handle down
drips the moisture from it at the edges
of the frame, and the material with which
it is covered dries evenly and leaves no
spot still soaked with water. If the
handle is upward, the water runs down
to one spot at the top, where the strong
cloth lining about the ring holds good
deal of it and in comparatively short
time rots the material, and it breaks
easily.
The man who carries his umbrella
swathed in its case when it is not called
into use by rain will soon find it wearing
out from top to bottom.
This is because of constant friction be-
tween the case and the silk, and no mat
ter of how good quality it may be the
holes will appear in it long before they
should, and the provider of the umbrella
will of course be blamed for selling in
ferior or damaged goods. There are
many people so ignorant of the proper
treatment of an umbrella that they will
actually roll it up when wet and leave
it to rot and mold until the next time
they want it fer use.-New York World.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
To Care For Flowers.

To keep flowers looking well the wa
ter should be changed daily and old
blossoms thrown away. Then the groups
should be carefully adjusted with rela-
ton to each other so no two tall speci.
mems should appear together. A little
sunlight may do no harm, but cut flow
ers exposed to the full rays of a power
full sun wilt at once, and a pretty or.
rangement is soon spoiled. EARLY morn
ing is the proper time to pick flowers.
They should be Immediately sprayed
with a rubber sprinkler, which, by the
way, is invaluable to one who is gather
ing fresh blossoms. We are apt to treat
flowers carelessly-a handful of them
picked in the heat of the day without a
good sprinkling is soon in the same con-
dition as a fish out of water.-New York
Advertiser
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
Whistling Jack.

Jack Mccarthy is Familiarity known
wherever he goes as sWhistlihg Jack. -
The prefix to Jack is tackled on him 10
minutes after he lands at any city, and he
has been in every town of over 10 900 in
habitants in the United States. Jack can
hardly be called boy now. He is 90 or
"A years old. He made his first appear-
ance in Pittsburg about 10 years ago. a
thin, nervous little chap, who suffered
SO distressingly that the charitably in
clined willingly gave him the price of a
paper rather than hear his pitiful at.
tempts to cry his wares. Somebody
told him one day that if he would whis-
tie when he came to word that he found
unpronounceable he would soon cure
himself of his painful stutter. Jack tried
It, and in less than six months the whis-
tie was as fixed habit as the stutter-
ing. AT the end of year he could no
more speak dozen words without II
whistles than he could fly, and this was
the way he got the sobriquet Of ..Whis,
Ting Jack. New York Mail and Elk.
press.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
TATTOO THE WEDDING RING.
a British Social Rcformer Suggests Brand
Ing Both Bride and Groom.

a British Social Rcformer Suggests brand
Ing Both Bride and Groom.
DEAR SIR-I wish in all earnestness to
make known q suggestion that would
save many broken heart among the
sensitive and many breach OF promise
case among the mercantile, and would
considerably tighten the labors Of the
police courts and law courts. My sug-
gestion is that every married man and
every married woman should have cir
Gle tattooed around the third finger Of
the left hand in place of or as well as
the wedding ring. This would be q sign
that could never be taken of or effaced
and would therefore leave lesser mar
gin for the treacheries and tricks Of biga-
mists and other great and small offenses
against law, society and individuals.
To make this proposition practical and
distinctive, of course certain rules would
have to be made. For instance, any I'M
married man or woman tattooing their
third finger to be heavily fined. Every
widow and widower to add q distin-
gushing mark to their ring. Every
married man or woman disunited by
law to have a bar of erasure across their
wedding ring, and those who marry two
or three times to add the extra circles
accordingly.
The operation of tattooing could with
all reverence be performed by an ez-
pert in thevestry after the church serv-
ice, or at the registrars Office for those
who only go through the civil ceremony.
This tattooing may seem return to
barbarisln, but our much Wanted civ
ilization has introduced such numerous
aids to deceit that a safeguard and a
warning. such as a tattooed wedding
ring. would become % practical prevent
i've of much sham, folly and wrong.
Only thosswho have sympathy for mn
lawful liberty will demur against the
idea being realized. I shall be pleased
to hear from all who approve of MY
scheme and>arew Hing to assist in form
ing society.to- Influence others in bring
ing aboutSecpstom that would help to
insure peace, respect and happiness to
many homes. and. hearts. Yours faith
fully, ks-fs B. T. KNoLLYs.
Letter tp PalE Mall Gazette.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
coURTING BY WIRE.
The Man Gushed Over the Ticker, but Was
Disseminated on Sight.

The Man Gushed Over the Ticker, but Wa
Disseminated on Sight.
A telegraph operator in Boston Office
once met with bitter disappointment
early in his career by falling in love with
a young woman at the other end of one
Of the old Western Union wires. She
used to say sweet little nothings when
lull in the business gave her an oppor-
tunity to use the wire. The young man
worked in the Boston Office and had the
reputation of being ely" sender and
able to receive what he could send, an all
Important factor in the ''sizing up" of an
operator. The woman was proud to have
him say even ''Gm" or "Ge" good morn
ing or good evening" to her, and the other
girls on the wire, with whom he never
condescended to exchange even these Or
binary salutations, were jealous. As time
wore on their conversations over the wire
became longer and more frequent. FL
nallya an invitation to come to Boston and
visit one of the theaters was given and
accepted. The Lothario of the wire was
towear red, red rose in his buttonhole,
white straw hat, with blue band; she
was to carry small satchel of peculiar
shape in one hand and fluffy lace hand
kerchief in the other.
The train arrived at the eastern sta
ton on time, and the satchel of peculiar
design was sighted. 1t was indeed pc
culiar design. 1t was an old fashioned
carpetbag of a grayish green color and
considerably older than the Morse alpha
bet. The girl was sight that would
have made Neil Burgess in the County,
Fair" go and hide. She was fully 48
years old. Long corkscrew curls of 81
past era hung down over her shoulders
like twists of molasses candy, and smile
doomed up under the caves of her sria-
bonnet that would have done credit to Q
assure in the side of Vesuvius. sri II
She was extremely glad to see him,
and he, with the instinct of true gem
tleman, tried to appear that he was just,
as glad to see her. He took her carpet
bag, and they boarded car for the
house where he was staying. There
were sly nudges and covert laughs at
the tea table, all the girls and young
men thinking the young operator was
entertaining his aunt from the country.
For the evening performance at the the
alter the giddy maiden fished out an aw-
full bonnet from the depths of her car
petbag and slicked up her curls in the
most approved fashion. The bonnet was
a flower garden in itself, and the writer
has the young mans own word for it
that she and the bonnet attracted more
attention than the play. 49, b.
The next day he sent her home, but
ever after he was careful not to allow
himself to converse with any one ON the
wire except on business. Donahos's
Magazine.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
The Man, the Goat and the Banana.

, A big gray goat walked the other day
down Whitehall street. When he came
near to a vendors cart which stood, piled
with bananas, by the curb on the east
side of the street, he paused and survey
ed the fruit with fixed and expression
less woodenness of countenance. A man
who came along as the goat stood there
stopped and bought a banana. He strip
ped the banana and handed the peel to
the goat. Then the man and the goat
both stood there and ate-the goat with
undertaking gravity, the man with ris-
ing smile. When they had finished, the
man went on his way, the smile still
playing on his features. The goat passed
on with a countenance of unbroken
woodenness.-Ne York Sun.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05


umbrella in The lot worth e8i didn't
know so many people wore cheap um-
brellas; something rotten in Denmark.
just come up here from my of{loe; striug
of people there reaching half way around
the block waiting to get in. There isn't
money enough left in the fund to buy ?
ferry ticket with. I've come here to See
if you won't lend me that amount. I'm
not going back. but notice in the
paper that Mr.. Dingbat. the well
known president of the Umbrella Insur-
ance company, having been suddenly
called to CHINA, left this morning by
way of Windsor and Quebec. Do ] get
the price of ferry ticket? Thanks"
And he went out, leaving the city editor
in condition of partial paralysis. DE.
troit Free Press.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
WEAKNESS OF HUMAN NATURE.

Eagerneas Of People to Take Undue Ad-
vantage or . Practical Scheme.
'Do you remember me?" inquired the
man as he quietly slipped up to the city
editors desk.
81 can't say that do" replied the city
editor, lookingIhim over carefully.
"You remember I was in here some
time ago giving policies of insurance on
punches of keyFT
"Oh, yes, remember now. L took
one"
.'Of course. All wise men do. Attic
same time, If Jou recall it, I told you ]
had great scheme for insuring umbrel-
las on the same planT
81 believe / do recall it. How did it
come outF'
The man threw up his hands hope
lessly.
well" he said, ''before that week
was out / had my umbrella insurance
company at work, with agents all over
town. The success was immediate and
phenomenal. Everybody wanted to in
sure his umbrella. The premium,was SO
cents a year. The amount to be paid to
persons returning lost umbrellas was 90
about the average price of an umbrella
. man doesn't like to lose. you know.
Agents turned i'm policies by the pocket
fuls the first week. hadn't any idea
there were as many half dollars in circu-
lation as received at my Office. Second
week they kept coming, and began to
think of plans for great building on
Woodward avenue for the accommoda-
ton of the business, to be known as tn.
Umbrella Insurance building. Third
week it was still going. Fourth week it
rained. Fifth week umbrellas began
coming in. didn't know there were SO
many .umbrellas in the world.
sixth week it was worse, and be-
gan to investigate. Watched the people
who brought them in and got the g.
Mostly people lbove suspicion-to look
at. Discovered they had been steailng
tiacga; al .eaer. 6keuy eslt oLessatg our
tag on il. d INIT know there were so
many people " ho thought it no sin TO
steal an umbrella; never thought of that
when I got up the company; wasn't an
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
Another Use For Paper,

Among the latest things made out Of
paper are artificial straws for slipping
cobblers and various iced drinks. Every
body knows that real straws are apt to
be defective, but the limitations never
fail to draw. After they are rolled they
are treated with parafin to render them
water tight and nonabsorbent. The same
patent covers mouthpieces for cigarettes,
which are manufactured in a similar
fashion. Philadelphia Times.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
SILVER AND GOLD.

a Farewell, my little sweetheart
81 Nov fare YOU well and free;
claim from you no promise.
You claim no vows from mo.
The reason why?--the reason
II Right wellw can uphold
~ have too much of silver
4 And you've too much ~ gold.
A puzzle this, to worldlings,
Whose love 10 lucre flies,
Who think that gold to silver
Should count as mutual prizel
~ a Bnt I'M not avaricious,
And you're not sordid souled;
! have too much of silver,
And you've too much of gold.
Upon our heads the reason
Teo plainly can be seen;
= ! am the winters bond slave,
You are the summers queen.
~ Too few the years you number,
Too many have told;
have too much of silver,
And you've too much of gold.
You have the rose for token,
have dry leaf and rime;
j have the sobbing yesper,
80 You, morning bells at chime.
would that were younger
yet you grew never old
Would had less of silver,
But YOU no less of gold.
2 49, Edith NJ. Thomas
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
Two Opinions.

!. Lord ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS v-'
selyn-on this dover question, you know.
Don't you-aw-think every wife ought
to have little money-aw?
Miss Eyelyn-Yes, indeed, my lord.
I'm right with you there. Because then,
you see, if the girl makes bad job of
it, she will be fixed to back out.-New
York World.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
No OGense.

A boy was once brought before '.Old
Steady" Baker. the mayor of Folkestone,
for stealing gooseberries. Baker turned
over Burns Justice" but not being able
to find the article he wanted in the book.
which is alphabetically arranged, he lift
ed up his spectacles and addressed the
culprit thus: my lad, it's very lucky for
you that, instead of stealing gooseber-
ries, you were not brought here for steal
ing a goose. There Is statute against
stealing geese, but can't find anything
about gooseberries in all Barn, SO let the
prisoner be discharged, for suppose it is
no Ofense. San Francisco Argonaut. 2
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
The Linen Duster.

cit is long time," said travelling
man, '.since have seen linen buster Of
the old fashioned kind, which wrinkled
and creased whenever you sat down in
il, especially if the weather was little
damp, and which looked after you had
been 100 miles or SO in it as though you
had worn it around the world II times,
all the way by rail, and had sat up in It
all the time, but alpaca busters are still
worn. New York Sun,
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
rhs sconerx shIfted \

The members of a theatrical COM
pany, travelling through Lake George on
their way to Canada, were commenting
upon the grandeur Of the scenery when
the train came to standstill One of
the men, becoming impatient, ventured
out, and upon his return was asked the
cause of the delay. well, "he replied,
"a piece of the scenery has fallen across
the track. Life.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
what He Meant.

Adolphus - I'm afraid I hit him
deucedly hard. / just looked at him, you
know, in a significant way and said,
1.-THE fools aren't all dead yet.
Arthur-And what did he say?
Adolpuhs-He said: mo, but you
aren't looking well, Dolly. You'd better
take care of yourself" Wonder what in
time he was driving at?-Boston Tran
script
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
= = :

San Francisco is the most cosmopolitan
city in the world. The holidays OF every
nation are COMMUNICATED by public pa
rades. Every civilized language may be
heard, and the ships of every maritime
nation from the British man-of-war to
the Maltese felucca and the Chinese junk
are seen in the bay.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05

Senator Perry j. Lewis tells a story on
Congressman Joe Bailey, for which, how.
ever, he quotes Senator A. NJ. Carter OF
Fort Worth as authority.
Zone day" said Lewis, Garter and
Joe Bailey were standing on the stree
when they saw approaching them I,
darby mounted on frisky and spirited
horse, whose fine appearance caught the
fancy of Carter, who is lover Of fine
horsefesh. Carter hailed the darby and
remarked:
THAT'S pretty spirited animal you
are riding, old man. Is he good run
ner?'
"'Well, no, sab, he isn't much Of
runnin boss, replied the rider. u
"'Oh, then he is good trotter, sup
pose, remarked Carter.
"sNo, sab, he amt no trotter neither,
said Scipio Africanus.S
"NOh. see.' calculated Carter; 'heis a
No. PAGER
"'No. sab, dis boss amt no trotter,
nor he amt no PAGER needer.'
"NVell, what is he fit for anyhow
asked Carter.
"'Jnst ter prance arOun an look fine,
boss replied the darby, IAN OATS why ]
has outen accomplishment named him arter
Marse Joe Bailey dar.'" Galveston
News. So.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
over Long Ago.

He (who has just proposed Don't give
me your answer now, Think it over.
She tcalmly)-I did think it over. !
thought it was all over when / saw you
flirting SO outrageously with the Barstow
girl.-New York Herald. -
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
Mistaken idea.

She was reading over the column of
marriage notices.
!, ''It can't be true," she said, shat mar
rage is lottery"
s"And why notp" asked the young man
with her.
Because there is law against adver-
Using lotteries, and look at this" she re-
piled. handing the paper to him.-De-
troit Free Press.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
Mas Russelrs Fondness For Poker.

am informed that one reason of the
little rift within the Perugini lutte con-
sisted in Miss Russell's prediction for
poker. This is science to which the
golden diva has devoted much study.
She likes game of poker and plays it
Oh the strict rules laid down by Cen,
eral Schenck. Her parties for this d.
version are usually composed of four or
five people, each of whom is million
aire. But Miss Russell's income aver
ages $50, 900, and she can afford to play.
The limit is high and the betting lively.
Signor Perugini, whose salary is only
$3.50 week, could not sit down at such
game without risking his entire weeks
earnings. Consequently he was ruled
out and had to solace himself with SEN
timental arias up stairs while his. wife
was winning or losing a fortune down
stairs. This isolation brought dis
quietude to his thoughts, and next morn
ing he was perhaps not SO cheerful a
companion as a diva would wish at the
breakfast table. New York Press
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
A Time KILLER.

Ed-What do you do to pass away the
time? e8k
Ned-Easy enough. I just give my
promissory note to some one for 80 days,
and the time passes quickly enough, ]
assure you.--London Culver.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05

After paradise Lost" was printed it
was translated into French, and this YER
sion falling into the hands of an innocent
Englishman he translated it back into
English and sent it to q publisher. The
manuscript Is now in the British mu-
scum,
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
WvvEsaI is

astor is Dr.. Samuel Pitchers prescription for Infants
and Children. contains neither Opium Morphine
other Narcotic substance. 1t is harmless substitute
for Paregeric Drops Soothing Syrups and Castor OIL
1t is Pleasant. Its guarantee is thirty years Oy
Millions Of Castoria destroys Worms and alays
feycrshn ess. prevents vosating Sour Curd,
cures Diarrhoea and Wind Collie. Castoria relieves
Gectaing troubles, constipation and hatulency
Caseria assmiIates food, regulates the stomach
and bowels, giving healthy and natural sleep. Cas-.
toria is the Chidrens Panaeea-the Mothers Friend
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
Something She Would Stop AZ.

II don't believe that horrid Miss Dol.
ton would stop at anything.
Bob-Did you ever try her with .
soda fountain? Chicago Inter Ocean.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
Castoria.

'Ca--.SS--ia is an excellent medicine for Chi
,lren Mothers have repeatedly told me of its
good effect upon their Children
DIR. G. G. OsGooD, {.
Lowssl, Mass
"Castoria is the best remedy for children or
which am acquainted. hope the day IS not
far distant when mothers will consider the real
interest of their children, and use Castoria in
stead of the various uack nostrums which are
destroying their loved ones, by forcing opium,
morphine, soothing syrup and other hurtfu
agents down their Threats, thereby sending
them to preurlture graves"
DR.. J. t. KISCHELeE,
Conway, Ark.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
Eastoria.

GdSCOIld.
'Castoria is SO well adapted tn cnildren he
recommend it as superior to any piescriptSa
known to me-"
n. A. ARCHER, NJ H.,
III &c. Oxford St, Brooklyn, n. Y.
''oAr physicians in the childreR's derars
ment have spoken highly of their cNoerl
ence in their outside practice vita ;sastoIia,
and althou.S, we only have among Ell
medical suf--,ies what is know. as resalas
products, yes ne are free TO confess that tn
merits Of Castoria has won us to took '4tti'
favor upon it,"
UNITED HOSPITAL AND DIsrsasARS
Boston, Mas
ALLEN G. SmrTn, Pres,
uzray Sl-~-.s, New York City.
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05

Th.s F. Cakes. H. C. Payne. H. C. Reuse, Receivers,
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05

Tho Centaur Company, II q
The Sauk Centre herald. (Sauk Centre, Stearns County, Minn.) 1886-current, 1894-07-05
saGreat Northern
FIN. Table.

MAIN LtSF.