The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1894-11-10
SMALL MEN AND BIG WOMEN.
With Some Eensa-..5 Also on the Traits of
Little Women AID Zig Men.

II wife No. 1 was short depend upon
1t that wife No. is short, too.
1t has always been said that small
men love big women, and vice versa,
and the old Snowman in Dickens story,
"chops, the Dwarf" gave it as his ex-
perience that dwarfs always fell in
love with the giantess in museum,
and that this was good for the trade,
since it prevented the propagation of
too many dwarfs, and thus kept them
the curiosities that they were. Never
theless, there have been good many
marriages between the dwarfs. Gen.
and Mrs. Tom Thumb were both dwarfs.
Gen. Tot married Lucia Zerati, and
neither of them was yard high. Sim
liar instances could be multiplied, but
these marriages, like a good many
other marriages among larger people,
are for show purposes. and the dwarf
husband is quite certain to be flirting
with the women who are almost big
enough to swallow the little adorer as
though he were capsule.
Giants also are likely to marry small
women, but they do not run to the
same extremes as the dwarfs do in
their love affairs. 1t is not recorded
that the celebrated Nova Scotia giant
ess had any husband, nor are museum
fat women happy in having many ador-
ers, except, perhaps, among profess
sional living skeletons, when the ludi-
crous side of the case makes it impossi-
bic that the passion should be mutual.
Now, this general rule about tall wo-
men and short women can be said to
apply in modified degree with respect
to the feelings that women entertain
toward men, but with difference; for
the women must wait for what men
may come to them, whereas the men
can go out in search of the women, and
consequently they have a wider field
of choice. OF course, this is all wrong,
and the tendency of our present civil
ization may eventually wipe it out, and
we shall then have women proposing
to men and regularly laying siege to
their hearts whenever it suits them to
do so. AS soon as this state of affairs
arrives it will be easy to see that wo-
men prefer big men to little men, or
vice versa. 1t is probable that big men
will have the largest number of suitofs,
for women, as a general thing. if they
like man, like great deal of him.
When you like, for instance, little
women there is no use in your endeav-
oring to place your position on any
basis of reason. If you say you like
them because they are cleverer and
more beautiful than big women you
are not talking sense. Size has nothing
to do with brains. and as for beauty, if
you judge it by the greatest produc-
tions of art, you will find the prepon-
derance is rather in favor of the larger
women. The Venus of Milo is big
woman. so is the Mcdici, so are the
seven virgins surrounding the car in
the painting of Aurora; most Madonnas
are of medium size, not small. As for
brains, they have no references to size.
George Eliot was big and so was Queen
Elizabeth, but Charlotte Bronte was
almost a dwarf. Harriet Martineau
was small. and so was Dolly Madison.
AS for heroic deeds, they appear to have
been performed by women of medium
size. Grace Darling is represented as
being of medium proportions. with a
tendency rather to be large. Florence
Nightingale was of ordinary size, with
tendency to be small. So with Nine.
Roland and others that could be named.
Women who have been famous be-
cause men loved them frantically and
braved a great deal for them have
usually been large. Cleopatra was
above the medium height; so was Lady
Hamilton, whom Lord Nelson loved SO
guilty; so was the wicked Aspasia; so
was Mary Shelley. For terms of en-
dearment, however, a woman is little.
The sense of protective devotion of men
seems to require this. Whoever heard
of man addressing his wife, my dear
big wife?"
OF course, size has little to do with
disposition. There is a prevailing tend
cncy, however, among large people to
be rather slow of mind, and conse-
quently rather slow to anger. Taken
as two separate classes, big women are
rather better tempered than little wo-
men, but there are some terrible vira-
goes among the big women. Fat wo-
men are, of course, nearly always good.
natured. 1t is the long, lean women
who are the worst. Female murderers
belong to this class, and it must be
added, in all fairness, some of the most
charming women in the world are in
clined to be long and lean. But Mrs.
sherman, the Connecticut woman who
killed a dozen people, was a lean and
hungry tigress, and if you will go to
the penitentiary you will find that this
is the prevailing type among criminal
women.
If you want a vicious, singing crea-
ture, that has tongue like needle,
you must get little woman-the
smaller the better. These are the
most terrible ones of all. They are
very apt to be good-looking, too, of the
brunette type, with dark, bright.
flashing eyes, When the eyes get
angry run away, if you know what is