The Kinsley graphic. [volume] (Kinsley, Kan.) 1890-1940, 1894-12-28
lLL-HUMOROUS.

ILLHUMOROUs.
The following article was read by
Miss Foran at the meeting of Edwards
county teachers last week.
''This situation is about as novel TO
me us sitting in the teachers chair is
to the average small pupil. If were
net SO dreadfully afraid of the sound Of
my own voice, might imagine Was
Il minister.
In his guidance to public speakers,
last night, Mr.. Mcdonald omitted one
rule, and that is, the religious avoid
ance Of the pronoun 81" We are told
TO use ''we'' instead, as it is more
polite; seeming as it does, to include
your audience and making them share
in the responsibility of your production.
Sometimes the use of the pronoun s'I'
is absolutely unavoidable and we
should use it whenever necessary. We
have noted precedent, us even Grover
Cleveland has been known to use it in
Ills messages, and the same excuse
that pleads for Grover Cleveland pleads
for me. am afraid my self-respect
Will he gone entirely itfter coupling our
names together SO promlscuously).
ILe people of the United States are
very willing to be exempted from any
responsibility IN his actions, lit
wouldn't change matters much if they
weren'N, and my audience will be glad
to he excused from any responsibility
in this bundle of digression, and, as
our worthy. sheriff has kindly offered
ever am honest enough to own up, oi
course L >. am not responsible either.
(By the way our sheriff is man Of
acute perceptions
What l started to say was this: l
have an enemy. Who he OF she may
be do not know, but whoever it may
be, he OF she, has placed me on this
program with malice atorethought.
The title itself would have eXasperated
Burdette, and would be very sure to
place him in his most melancholy vein.
So, to avoid misnOmer, We will cali
this an "Ill-lIumOruus Article" Ii
we had been asked to write history
of ancient Greece for the Teachers
Association we would have made the
attempt, despite the fact that our
knowledge on this subject extends only
to Il slight acquaintance with pack
ing house butter Besides, MI Nc
Donald described SO accurately the
nervous earthquakes that are the signs
OF true greatness, that We have COLI
ciuded that it would be truly deplOr-
able if the world should lose second
Webster for lack of such common
commodity as assurance.
During our summer Normal Mr..
Cormack dwelt so continually OH the
virtues of the Festen School Journal
and its editor that we became slightly
prejudiced, but lie came, was seen,
and conquered, and we will have to
admit that Mr.. Cormack judged better
than we knew. And why? Simply
because Ii, voiced sentiments that we
have condemned ourselves AS sscross-
grained egotists'' for holdldg. NO
sarcasm intended-) How often have
we gone to church or school enter
tainments. public sreakings, and even
Normal exercises, and listened to some
heart-rending selection while our
teeth gritted together and we felt as
though all the pity and humanity
within us was stirred with the wrong
| stick. We once saw a big, lubberly
fellow actually crying over an emotion.
al selection poorly acted and fairly
spoken. 1 suppose we ought to be
ASHAMED to confess it, but we wanted
to reach over and box his ears. OF
something equally desperate. know
we said mentally, you parenthesis idiot
if you would ponder OH the elocution
! lists own case you would find some
thing ten times more pathetic OH which