davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06
CHIEFLY cHAFF.

stage Manager Have you taken
any preparations for stage carcsr7
Applicant proudly I've been divorced
twice.
First Actor in tragic whisper Arc
we quite aione2 Second Actor. Fiauc.
ing grimly at the small audience
Almost.
Little Sister Docs evcrythinr need
the rain TO make II green2 Biv sister
Yes i. S.Is that why your young
man carries an umbrellaq
Little Miss Suburb liza ir,t -.
mean for anything Mira. suburb
What is PETE Little suburb ~.
rained every day sincs got nv new
watering pot
Physician--your cough SCENE q, =,
better Patient Oh. yes. tho coughs
improved wonderfully. But now Ina,
IT, about strong enough u take care
OF itself wish you'd try % do ti,ttc
something to take care of me.
Irate Individual e What Ala 49,,
mean by telling Smith I had been In
Jaht '"lhh individual II didn't tail
smith you had been in iail simni,,
said you ought to be m iail Irn,.
individual beg your pardon /
must have misunderstood him
Tom reading history Pretty rough
the way that Spanish inouisi,ion 80,
TO treat people. eli? Dicl, on :
dunno. They showed great deal Of
ingenuity in thumbscrcws ami tbin,s
but not one Of them thought 81 ~
the efect OF Rotations BY young clio.
cutionists Wv
Mr. Billus-IIcre's ncwspansr mar.
agraph that says women are Lose co..
sitive to pain than men 800 -
.neres something in that Marin
mrs. Blllus Yes, that's tbc mssr y,
line theory. The truth Of On, ma ,t,a
: that women have more fortt,nda
IMAM men As mercyl For beav.
ems sake, John, be auickl Knoc,,
that horrid bug oil my hair ""o0A
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06
MOUNTING A CAMEL.
- =. Really Something OF "a ART
Opinions From Fsin fserl

:, =. Really something OF al Art
Opinions From Fsin fserl
To mount a camel for the hrst
time is for howadji. until no gets
The lang OF il, complicated ana
anxious process. The first risk Is
that the animal will rise while tho
rider is climbing into the saddle
This he will inevitably do II 'he az
tendant has forgotten 90 place ms
foot on the camels knee, says 'he
Nineteenth Century.
The novice, having settled IN the
saddle. which is like a Hat wooden
tea tray on the top OF hump, ana
taken q tight grip OF the "horhs'
~ which there Is oae in front aud
one behind. waits In suspense, won,
dering which end OF the animal
means TO get up hrst The aeuon'
when il does begin, Is violent SEQ
saw in three jerks, which impel MIN
alternately ia the direction OF inc
head aud the tail, until, II no y
lucky. he finds himself ten feet from
the ground The dtteenth century
pilgrim, Felix Fabrl, SO exactly e&'
presses my sentiments about camsls
that | will quote his remarks he
says
"A camel has a small head aud y
without hornS II has big and ter
rIble eyes aud always seems sor-
rowlal and troubled animal 10
eyes arc like ire beacons, aud big
reflections shlne 10 them. Tor what.
ever a camel looks at seems greai
AMI huge 10 il, wherefore Il scent
IL Wow everything with wonder and
alarm When. therefore. man goes
up 70 IL the beast begins 20 trem
bic. 50 that the man percetyes tha'
the beast trembles because the mas
coming toward il seems 20 y 90 o'
four times bigger than be really ls
..liad not tod 30 ordered y thi
animal would not BE- as tatae an'
disciplined ~ u Is, When il screams
being Ia trouble. Il opens lts mouth
shakes is head aad raises up ~
long neck. wagging IL 10 and fro. .
that man who l. nCt accustomed
TO il is disturbed aud frightened
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

GREAT numbers Of valuable lives
are lost IN the water every summer
by the most deplorable careiessness.
All children ought to be taught to
swim. But all children. whether
they can swim or not, and all grown
people, also, ought to be cautioned
against taking reckless risks in the
water Children or adults who go
in bathing without knowing the
depth of the water, and without
knowledge of currents or of under
tow are foolishly endangering their
lives. Silly pranks in rowboats and
stupid neglect of squalls in sailboats
ought to be avoided with a. much
care as people show in trying to es-
cape from earthquakes, cyclones and
explosions
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06
Another Long .elt Want

Friend Il Working at something
new?
Inventor Yes sir; greatest thing
vet. It's new patent safety life pre-
server for ferry boats. steamers. etc.
Whats its advantages over the
old kind?"
1.-The ADVANTAGE Why, sir. you
may not believe it, but it's so light
that If thrown to person in the
water it can hit him without killing
him
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

Chicago Councilman - can stand
a good deal. but this IL too much.
Friend What's the matger'
Chicago Councilman dlaH't
mind voting 20 make - Pasrlek's
day a legal holiday. and dtdu't OBJ
iect when IL come 10 adding En
peror Williams birthday 20 the legal
holidays. but When thcss Chicago
Chinese larndryucu come forth and
demand that 80 decorate the city
hall and suspend business because
It's the anniversary 81 the day that
the great Coniuclus caagh: tho
measles, I think its time 10 draw
the line Life
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

IT has been shown by the last
census that but 12.4 per cent OF the
population OF this country is litter
ate. This is a decided improve
ment on the exhibit OF 1889 when
the illiteracy was II per cent. The
percentage of illiteraey, however,
has been reduced among the native
born white and colored population.
Among the foreign born population
the percentage OF illiteracy is foun
to be considerably increased. This
percentage was ID in 1899 and but
~ per cent in 1880 The increase
is accounted for by the excessive
immigration OF the most degraded
class of Italians, Huns, Poles and
Bohemians. But for this condition
the exhibit OF 1890 would have made
America rank first in point of in.
telligence OF all countries on earth.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

JACKSON won't fight in the South
and Corbett won't fight In the North.
Corbett won't fight in Europe and
jackson prefers Europe. The
amount OF trouble necessary to get
these two hrutes together is strain
on the public patience. But the y
will fight finally. 1t is all part OF
the playa formality almost as
time-honored as the preliminary
bandshake.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

A CoUNrRYMAN in Scotland who
feels that he ought to be laureate
publishes a plea for the honor. He
says he can write poetry at any
moment and in any place" and he
has repeatedly written half dozen
poems in single evening" What
/ once write | can never erase" he
remarks further, las always think
deeply before | write"
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

A New YORK writer, discussing
the imper4urbability of the modern.
sophisticated girl, notes that the lat
ter is nowadays rarely observed to
cr,. But this writer may be mis-
led by the fact that owing to the
state of the temperature in New
York whatever tears come to the
eyes Of the New York girl immedi-
1tely pass of in steam.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

Said an exasperated father Mt tho
dinner table; "You children turn
up your nose at everything on the
table. When was a boy was glad
to get enough dry bread to eat IS
81 say papa. you are having much
better time OF 1t now you are living
with us, amt youP" remarked little
Tommy Tit Bitg.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

Editor Bean County Clarion ana
Farmers Friend-No, Silas Hopkins.
y0u can't expect me to take such
scraggy, mean lot OF vegetables as
that for subscription to my paper
for next year
Silas Hopkins-Well, you oughter.
then. Them's the kind o vegetables
| raised from follerin' your advice in
your Hints to Farmers" column
Puck.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

THE wooden leg of one Aherns OF
New York is a very troublesome
member. He is in the penitentiary
for using it as a club upon his wife
aud the wife has just used it in the
same way to break the wrist OF a
neighbor, Mrs Rigney. There must
bs something inherently bad in that
wooden limb.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06
She was Too Expensive.

''Then you consent?n exclaimed
the young man joyously.
Yes, " said her father. ''It pains
me to give her up, but really can't
afford to keep her any longer. Chi
cagO Record.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

ALL we have to say to Colonel
Denison who told the people OF Lon
don at recent banquet that only a
fear of the British navy and 5000
OOJ Canadians restraints the United
States from making war on England.
is that he really ought to have had
his hat checked in the cloak room,
don't you know.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

SPEAKING OF Japan as small
nation, it has larger area than
Great Britain and a greater poDula-
tion than France As to the fight.
ing quality of the Japanese. they
are not leaving any room for dis.
cussiop about that.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

The police OF Boston have fallen
under the han of suspicion and they,
too. are to be subjected to the or
deal of Lexow committee investi-
CATION The seed sown by the venal
in New York seem to have been
scattered in other cities. so that the
necessity follows for Simultaneous
harvest of the noxious weeds. Which
American city will be the nexto
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

In is curious that the fastest model
for a racing ocean steamer shoE4d
have come out of Philadelphia
which has never been noted for rap
idlty, But already the experts say
that Mr. Painton's ship could never
get across the blue in three days as
he thinks.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

ALTHOUGH the war news is largely
monosyllabic it must almost kink the
cable to say it quick and get 1t ex-
actly right The Chen Yuen, Kow
Shung and Tsao- Kiang from Hang
Hoo and Hung Chung struck kerr
bang the Wo Gee, Haw Buck and
Gee Haw from Wo Back and strewed
the wreck pellmell on Ding Dong
from Koo Moo to So Kow. and SO on.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

Is the Chinese government going
TO call into service that native band
which formerly played in Midway
plaisance9 And will not civilized
and humane Europe feel impelled TO
interfere?
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06
CHARLEY HOOD00
AL BECAUSE HE HAD RED HAIR
AND WAS cROSS-EYED.

The Thrilling Experience OF an o'"-
Time River Iilos-Uncsnay Things
Happened when lie steamboated ON
tl:c Columbia.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

The Imperial Chinese declaration
o. war srys that the Japanese ruff
fans in Ccrea were repeatedly en-
Joined to ego home and return to
virtue" The Japs seem to have re-
garded this as Mongolian joke,
with sauce Tartar.
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

BREy1Tr is the soul o. defeat in
some advertising. Grain won't grow
to fruitfulness the day it is planted
Blackfoot news. (Blackfoot, Idaho) 1891-1902, 1894-10-06

Nd States u
hssed with
Everything
n oae bran
II rather
h likely I
rest duFin
L. Of mill
|sny eoneed
II greatest
n this line
II has not
n exact res
NJ There
about tn
i, where tn,
Il atlon is IL
ssndi
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

A correspondent of the Providence
Journal in a recent issue of that paper
has very strong article condemning eth
act of the state authorities in the case of
Fielding, known as 1.-the chisel ffend.',
This young Jesse Pomeroy, it will be
remembered assaulted little girl on the
Hartford road in Johnston. with a chiseI
and came near ending her life. He was
sent to CranstOn for two years, very
light sentence it was thought, and now
having served his sentence, Fielding is
allowed to go, on condition that he leaves
the state, although several cases could be
brought against him. The people of the
neighboring states may appreciate this
Ill directed act of clemency. and the peo-
pie of this state may possibly think that
Fielding expiated his crimes by two
years imprisonment.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09
A MOST MYSTERIOUS VISION.
An Uncanny Dream In Which Major An
dre's Fate Was Depicted.

uTe's ate w as Depicteus
The following instance may serve to
strikingly justify Colquhoun's theory
that there is an original spiritual ener-
gy expressed in dreams which has moth
| ing to do with the state of the body and
| is beyond the power of the soul when it
has been reabsorbed by the material or
| ganiZation on awaking.
Prior to his EN- barkation for America
at the outbreak of the Revolutionary
war Major Andre went to visit a friend,
Miss Rebecca Steward, who lived in
| Derbyshire. During his stay it was ar
ranged that they should ride over to
view the wonders of the famous Peak.
1t was also Miss Steward s desire to in
J iroduce the major to some friends In the
neighborhood, including Mr.. Newton
and the curate of the parish, Mr.. Cum
ningham. She had given both these gen.
tlemen notice of her intention, and
while awaiting her arrival Mr.. Gun
ningham took occasion to tell Mr.. New
ton the circumstances of a dream he
had had the night before, which affect
ed him so that he could not shake off
the recollection of it.
He said that he was standing in the
midst of a forest that was entirely
strange to him. After gazing listlessly
around him for few moments he per-
ceived horseman approaching at great
speed. As the latter came opposite the
spot where the dreamer stood three men
who seemed to have been lying in am
bush sprang from their place of con-
cealment, and seizing the bride of the
horse ordered the rider to dismount.
They then carefully searched his person
aud led him away. The face, figure
and bearing of the horseman made so
deep an impression upon Mr.. Cunning
ham s mind that he awoke. but falling
asleep again presently dreamed that he
was one of throng of spectators near
great city; that he saw the same per-
son he had seen seized in the wood
brought out between files of soldiers,
who marched him to a gallows and
there hanged him. When Major Andre
and Miss Steward arrived, Mr.. Cunning
ham was horror struck to discover in
the person of Miss Steward s friend the
very man whose seizure and execution
he had witnessed in his dream.
Here was an accurate anticipation of
events that actually happened within
12 months from the date of the dream.
The capture of Andre, the search of his
person for documents that convicted
him for acting the part of spy and his
public execution constitute one Of the
most dramatic episodes of the contest
with the mother country. How is it
imaginable that so definite vision OF
coming events could arise from the in
ftence of any physical condition on the
mind of the sleeper? What possible
state of the body could confer upon the
soul the power to describe future occur
rences with such exact fidelity to de-
tails?-New York Times.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

The retirement of Gladstone from the
premiership of Great Britain removes
from the stage of active politics the
worlds greatest statesman. The claim
can not be questioned. for he stands go
far above all compatriors in statescraft
that no one would think of naming a rival
He has earned his great fame by sixty
years of active political life. by wonderful
talents and untiring labor. A profound
statesman, an unrivalled orator, pro-
found scholar and Christian gentleman ;
no wonder Englishmen of all parties
respect this countryman who has served
England so faithfully and we'll; and no
wonder that all from Queen to yeoman
unite in doing honor to the Grand Old
Man" the grandest this century has pro-
duced
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09
SMALL TALK.

1t sthe old saying that March comes in
like lamb, but judging from the Book
beer advertisements it often comes in
like goat.
Midnight oil is the proper thing for
dark lanterns.
Persia has decided to coin no more
silver. The future of the while metal
grows darker.
Lotteryville, village near Westerly,
has new postofice and also a new
name. The postoffice authorities objected
to Lotteryville and the place is now
Avondale.
Imported goods-German measles.
The life of a juror is one of tedious
listeniDg.-Pascoag Herald.
He has a trying time, sure.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09
His Trip to Japan.

The rector of one Of the up town
churches announced in Sunday school
that ali the boys who were faithful at
tendants at the classes for a specified
time should be taken on stereopticon
trip to Japan.
Time passed, and the period was fin
ished. But before the promised enter
tainment could be announced there was
a ring at the rectory door one day, and
a good woman appeared inquiring for
the preacher. He was out, and she was
told she must come again.
She was willing, adding that she
wanted to see him about her boys 60
ing to Japan. He had won the trip, she
said, but she didn't know what clothes
he would need or what preparations sne
might have to make.
1t is to be feared, though it is not so
stated, that the rector was out the next
time she called too.-New York Times.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

Iuva INTO my nead mat wouIu Iol-
low the fashion and eliminate the extra
letter. started in by writing to my
father, respected and prominent physi-
clan In Baltimore, and signing it In the
improved way, Your affectionate son,
Binger Herman My father quickly
detected the change, and back came a
letter whose earnest reproaches l have
never forgotten.
He pointed out that the name stood
for one of the greatest heroes of antiq-
uity, Armenius, the Hermann Of Taci-
tus, who stood like a bulwaIk against
Roman lust Of conquest, and to whose
leadership the ancient Germans owed
the preservation of their nationality,
their language and their freedom. He
said that name was given me by those
who alone had the authority to confer
it, and with their consent the name
should never be altered. even in respect
to letter. The rebuke l received so
impressed me that concluded if the
name was good enough for my father it
would be good enough for me. Wash
ington Post.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09
STATE OF OHIO, CITY OF TOLEDO, .,
TOCAS COUNTv %

STATE OF OHIO, CITY OF TOLEDO, !
LoCAs COUNTY.
FRANK j. CHENEY makes oath that be
is the senior partner of the firm of f. j.
CHENEY & Co., doing business in the city
of Toledo, County and State aforesaid.
and that said firm will paw the sum of
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and
every case of Catarrh that cannot be cured
by the use of HALLS CATARRH CURE.
FRANK j. CHENEY.
Sworn to before me and subscribed in
my presence, this 9Th day of December,
A. d. 1886.
A. W. GLEASON,
! SEAL Notary Public.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally
and acts directly on the blood and mucous
surfaces of the system. Send for testi-
monIals. free.
F. j. CHENEY & CO., Toledo, o.
&SeSOld by Druggists, 75c.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09
A Whist Curiosity.

Those who are fond of hand al
whist will be interested in the follow
ing peculiar circumstance: One even
ing four friends were playing rubber
at mutual friends house not far from
BarnstaplC. o. d. and r. B. were part
ners, and E. B. and G.. H. were ditto.
On two occasions E. b. and G. II. won
every trick, and on one occasion o. d.
and R. B. held every black card, and
E. B. and G. H. every red one. Clubs
were trumps. Devon and Exeter Daily
Gazette.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

The sentence of Boss McKane may
seem severe, especially when we consider
that the Car OF Gravesend probably
never dreamed that he was doing any
thing wrong. Just the same the effect
can hardly be other than salutary, and
will be likely to cause others of his ilk to
tread more cautiously and think more
seriously before they break laws even in
as good a cause as politics.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09
Hzj|zSll'I HNzzj||E!Slll!Iz:I

Eating ones own words may soon be a
very palatable occupation, for an
Austrian confectiouer has devised a
scheme whereby newspaper may be
made of thin sheet of dough and with a
thin preparation of chocolate.-Paw-
tuxet Valley Times.
Is it possible to make this dough
into pi
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

The law requires Albany saloons to
close at a certain hour. The excuse of
one violator, charged with keeping open
all night, was that his brother had gone
out of town, taking the keys with him,
and he could not lock up.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

The bee is an artistic upholsterer. 1t
lines its nest with the leaves of flowers,
always choosing such as have bright col
ors. They are invariably cut in circles
SO exact that no compass would make
them more true.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

At last ex-Governor Wetmore has
declared himself and is candidate for the
Republican nomination of United States
Senator from Rhode Island. If the SEN
atOrs were elected by the people there
would be no doubt but Mr.. Wetmore
would be called on to reside in Washing
ton for six years at least.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

Rockers withdrawal frem the sena-
tOrial race is another proof of the excel
lent sense of the Republican leaders in
this state, of never wasting precious
ammunition in firing at each other.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

Daniel Webster still lives to some peo-
pie in this country. Letters are still oc-
casionally received at Marshfeld post
Office addressed to Hon. Daniel Web
or ~
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

Mckane has left Gravesend but
McKaneism still exists, as law and order
meeting was broken up on Tuesday eve
ming by the late Boss adhtrents.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

The Times congratulates the Newport
Enterprise on arriving at its eighth birth
day. The Enterprise is bound TO grow
old gracefully like it's respected pro-
prietOr
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

Mrs. Lease lectured two and one-half
hours the other day at Lynn. She says
she likes to lecture. That is all right
Ellen, but how about the audience.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

The Cathedral of Kazan in st. Peters
burg has sold as many as 80, ,092 conse-
Grated wax candles at prices ranging
from kopecks to ruble apiece.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

II will soon be time to SOW Democratic
clover. This crop was a failure last year,
and many think it will turn out no better
this season.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

Lord RoseberY, the succ essor of
Gladstone, was born with a silver
spoon in his mouth, and the spoon became
gold lined when he married Rothschild.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09
His Reasons,

People sometimes ask me why spell
my name with two MS" said Repre-
sentative Hermann. when / was a
student In Maryland years ago. I got
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

Ex-President Harrison has gone to the
Mid-Winter Fair. and 1t is safe to say
that he will have a good time.
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

Two walnut chairs that were brought
to this country from Switzerland 240
years ago, it is claimed, are in the pos
session of Landon Thomas of Augusta,
Ga
The Olneyville times. (Olneyville [Providence, R.I.]) 1887-1917, 1894-03-09

"Esop's Fables" by Caxton, publish
ed in 1884, was the first book printed, it
is said. with its pages numbered