davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
HOW HB GOT left.

lie was a cold calculating father ,and
he made his figures on canary :olored
blotting pad with blue pencil. When
he had finished, he called his daug btsl
Rose into the library and said:
"Rose, that young Randall has asked
my consent to merrv von.'
"Yes, father she answered as blush
as red as Navajo Indian blanket man
tied her face.
Eyes, know, and we must practice
economy
II have some figures to show you.
After you have paid the rent on your
woodbln cottage, LAID IN ton Of coal
bought a gallon Of kerosene, paid the
cook s wages and allow for his cigars
and your street Car fare you will have
something left out Of his weeks sal
ary."
That's the way we figure, father.
"You will have enough to buy half a
pound of poor tea, two pounds of cod
fish and peck Of potatoes" he sternly
said AS he showed her the figures.
"Oh father. but I'm so glad-so glad
When l tell Will tonight, he will be
overwhelmed with delight y
1
He will, eh? what's the matter
with you gasped the old man as he
realized that the belt had slipped off
somewhere.
"Whv. fatker,we haye figured on it a
hundred times, and the best we could
make out was the co fish and tatte rs
and we expected to haye to drink water
for the whole first year We must haYe
made mistake of 80 cents week some
| how T.
"And you-vou-'
81 will marry him and be, oh so very
very happy Thanks, darling papa !!
There are no flies on you when you
take a pencil and sit down to figure!'
lie leaned back and opened his
mouth to say cmeth:ng tulther, bat
the words would not come. In the face
of such loye and confidence and goldfish
and economy as that lie w's dumb.
And she ran away to telephone to Will
that they could also have tea twice. 81
day, and the fire in the CRATE tlick kered
and died out, ,ani the incande>ccnt light
winked at the old mln wltl both eyes,
and he go' up and kichel the Cat and
growled to himself
"Durn my hide if amt left"
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
A Liar With a Fig Fish.

"Dear. dear" exclaimed George H.
Pegram to covey of railroad blNs
in the St. James, "hOW many liars
there are in the world anyhow.
Every small and large town has its
star liar, and my old town had one.
NV old town was Chatham, Mass.
There was. when ] was a boy, an old
fellow of the n3me cf GEORGE San
Ipr,. who wore without an effort tho
silvcr star Ct champion long distance
liar for the town and neiGhbollnS
vicinity. This fellow had been, ac-
corlinp to himself, lost % times Ill
great ocean WRECKS. He had wan
dered naked and starving up and
down cannilal islands and been res
cilgl in most pruyiLcn>lul manner.
Sharks and whales had valnly har-
bored designs against Ais life and IN
variably he had led them bootless
chase. in doing all this be had also
established his star reputation One
day George came into the town drag
ging after him an immense Goldfish.
"He stopped at all the houses, ne
was so we'll known, and calling out
the inhabitants pointed with pride
to the fish and said; Now, il | had
told you people had caught fish OF
that size you woul a have believed
it, George knew hi, reputation well
and be knew that to gain the actual
credit for his catch that he would
have to work for it. 1t always tlckled
me to think that the biggest liar III
town should catch the biggest tlsh
and then be compelled to drag it all
around town to prove it. st. Louis
Globe Democrat.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
How the SuItan's Food Is Prepared.

The food for tie sultan Of Turkey
is cooked by one man and his assist
ants. and 10 others touch it. 1t is
cooked in silver vessels, and, when
done, each kettle is sealed by slip
Of paper and stamp, and this IS
broken IN the presence of the sultan
by the high chamberlain, who takes
one spoonful from each separate ket-
tie before the sultan tastes it. This
is to guard against poison. The sultan
never uses plate. He rarely uses
knife or fork 4 spoon, his bread,
pancake or fingers are far handler.
1t requires Just twice as many slaves
as there are courses to serve dlnner
+. him. w onan's World.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
A Beautiful and Brilliant Girl.

Beauty, robust health, social promi-
nence and all that makes life bright
was rapidly fading from the possession
of the charming Miss X, of Beacon-st.
Her nearest friends could not imagine
what caused the tokens of anguish that
furrowed Ger the once smooth and
roseate countenance. When almost in
despair, she happened to see one of
those 'horrid newspaper advertisements
of Dr.. Pierce's Favorite Prescription,
which said it was a remedy for her case.
Without consulting her physicians or
anybody else she got the medicine Of
IA druggist, took it, and in three months
time she was we'll of her troubles. All
pains had ceased, she was herself again
and shortly resumed her place as lead
er of her chosen circle. Her experience
is that of thousands. Why may it not
te ycurr.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
No, Z
fnst Takers.

When Charles Mathews was in this
country, the rapidity Of his speech
was a cause Of much establishment,
but there was no loss of distlnctness
on that account. He was said to be
the most rapid tallier and singer on
the stage. Sarah B"rnhardt talks at
a furious speed sometimes, but every
speech that is to be spoken fast is
practiccd again and again, a little
more quickly each time, in order to in
sure clearness of utterance. New
York Sun.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

Cast iron melts at 3,479 degrees
F., copper at 2,54s degrees, gold at
$500 degrees and silver at 2,2a3 de-
grees, lead at G17 degrees and cast tin
at 442 degrees.
Railroad English.
Slang expressions generally or1ga-
nate with the railroad men, and a
person not versed in slang might
listen to a crowd of railroad men
talking for an hour without getting
the slightest impression of their
meaning. Consequently, when all
Atchison girl received the following
letter from her Apollo, brakeman,
she was somewhat puzzled: my
dear, pushed the cons face yester-
day, and he told the supe, who put
me on the carpet and finally put tho
can to me. l will have to lay over
on the hill for 10 days and will be
down to see you soon. "--Atchlson
Pine Trees on Volcanoes.
Every one who admlres trees must
be interested in the result of Profess
or Heilprins studies of the pines that
clothe the slopes of the great vol
canic mountains of Mexico.
These huge peaks seem to have
pierced their way upward through a
mantle Of pine forest, which clings
to their sides up to height of nearly
81 miles.
The vertical range Of the pine in
Mexico is remarkable. 1t is found
among the sun loving palm trees at
the foot of the mountains, and it
stands defiant of the cold close to the
perpetual SHOWS that cover their
SUBMITS. Youths Companion.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
DELICATE DISEASES o

either sex, however induced, promptly,
thoroughly and permanently cured.
Send 10 cents in stamps for large Illus
tratcd treatise, mailed IN plain sealed
envelope. Worlds Dispensary Medical
Association, 663 Main st. Buffalo N. Y.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

Newsdealer-See here, move on !!
Don't stand here all day reading every
paper on the stand.
Hungry Walkers-Dat's all right,
pard. Yer ferget l bought piece Of
chewin um yer las Thursday week.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

Charles-What did you mean when
you told your father just now that there
was only one thing you liked better
than work?
Tom-I,oahn, of course.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

Will Woor- What's the matter now ::
Coochy Cooington-Boo hoo, boo hoo!
I've found out you don't care any more
for me than | do for YOU
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

A-Lucky man, that fellow Jones.
B-What's happened now.
A-Dropped dead in front of a coffin
factory. If it had been me d haye
died lingering death SIX miles from
civilization.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

Elaine Would you ever get over it
and forget me, George, if should re
fuse you
George-You bet l would,
E-Well, then I'm yours.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

Mrs. N.-Since haye been married
have had only one wish ungratifed.
Mr.. N.-And what is that, my dear ?
Mrs. N.-That l were single again.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

It is not always safe to be too con-
fident in your assertions, even to an
ignorant man, for he may get the
better Of you in an argument.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
THURM0NT, Frederick County, Maryland Thursday April 26 1884,
A Blamed Sight Worse.

His toes with gout were aching
And his face was o'erspread with
6 loom.
No little ones shouts disturb him,
From noise the house was free,
In fact, from tht attic to cellar
Was quiet as quiet could be.
No medical aid was lacking;
Tha servants answered his ring.
Respectfully heard his orders,
And supplied him with everything.
But still there wa something wanting,
Something he couldn't command !!
The kindly words of compassion,
The touch Of a gentle hand.
And he said as his brow grew darker
And he rang for the hlreling nurse
evil. marriage may be a failure,
But this is blamed sight worse
Ragsev-Please, kind Sir, gimme a
nickle to keep me from starving.
Richman-There, poor man. take
that coupon and 90 enter your guess on
a sack of flour.
Teacher What are you boys 6ght
ing about
Tommy-Why, that chump was a.
irwin to make believe that Adam was
the first man when everybody knows
twas Columbus.
Tramp-Please hel pour cripple
Kind Old G ntrman (handing him
some mouey) Bless me! wht, of course.
How are you a c"ppN", my poor fellow
Tramp Il ocketing the mouey)-Fi-
nancially, sir.
Irritable Author.-Joseph, ca" t
stand that piano in the next fiat any
longer. The woman been humping
on it since 5 Il. m. Are you quite sure
the hall-door Is shut
Joseph Quite sure. sir; but, if you
like, | Il turn the key.
First Dude-Golng t. see the animals
deah boy?
Second Dude-No, d"ah boy; cant t
stand the ELECT on me nerves. Just
I'm g,.e VII # the kim Of beasts must
suffer, poor brute when the trainer
puts his head in his mouth,it he dcesn t
h ,'ren to like hair III
Hicks-I got that h rise at a fair bar
gam.
Mrs. Hicks-I suppose that is why
he limps?
Hicks-What are you talking about
Mrs. iIick,-I didn't know but he
got hurt in the crush about the bargain
counter.
F. There's no use in carrying lok" toe
far, .aid Washington man to a New
Yorker. Philadelphia isn't nearly as
slow town as We haye been led tc
believe her.
You think so?
To be sure. was over there the
other day. They use 1894 calendars
the same as we do.
judge T. o prisoner)-You are found
guilty Of meeting the plaintiff IN
lonely street, knocking HIM down anc
robbiug him of everything except /
valuable gold watch which he had with
HIM. What have you to say:
Prisoner-Had he Il gold watcl
with him at the time?
Certainly.
Then | put ia plea of insanity.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

After a years trial in the St. Pan
cras vestry district of London, mu-
nicipal electric lighting has proved a.
financial SUCCESS.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

There are over :;55, ,0oo N deposits
III Connecticut savings banks that
have not been added tC or drawn IN
the past 20 years.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

win many persons 1t would be- a
great gain to health if they would
walk to and from their places of
business in preference to riding.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
The Evil Of RunOrS.

80" said Mr.. Donegan, they We
been printing the funeral notice of
man that wasn't dead yit2 It's nice
fix they'd be in if he had been wan of
these people that believe Everything
they see in the newspapers, "-Ex'
rhanOa
The Advantages of Dead Peers.
The emperor Of China has ennobled
the ancestors of Sir Halliday Macart-
ney for three generations. con-
gratulate, these posthumous noble
men, wherever their disembodied
spirits may be. Honor will no doubt
be most gratifying to them. The
Chinese are more sensible than we
are. 1t is far more reasonable to
convert dead men who can do no
harm into noblemen than to make
unborn descendants Of living men
into legislators, in which capacity
they may do much harm. ->..~@a-
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

How are your sons prospects?
A little hazy at present,
lndeel::
You see he has Just entered college.
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26
CTIAS. E.;CASSELL.
EDITOR AND PUBLISHER OF
THECATOCTIN CLARION
orFICE-OSLER BUILDING, Northwest cerner
OF Church and Main Streets.

OFFICE-OSLER BUILDING, Nortn'"e'' '0'"
OF Church and Main Streets.
ru,us.-Tur CrocrlN CLARION is published every
hursday morning, at $l.oo per annum IN ADVANCE
athcrwise $l25 will be charged Inc Puo%nshef % az as
nns received for less than six monhs,nor any paPe
"" ont;nued until arrearagcs are paid. Advertise
:, :n,s welt display ed at the following rates.
10. Souare tour insertions or less. ........l.5o
eaca subsequent insertion rs
two monthS,... .......'.'' ''a'o'
three months, .....'..'..'.' 80
six months =. '-''.o'oo
5'So
Twelve lines constitute square. .
sYw-A liberal deduction made to yearly ao'e''se''
Local or special notices cents line
Catoctin clarion. [volume] (Mechanicstown, Md.) 1871-1940, 1894-04-26

Irritable Author-Joseph, ca" t
stand that piano in the next fiat any
longer. The woman S been humping
on it since ia. m. Are you quite sure
the hall-door Is shut
Joseph Quite sure. sir ; but, if you
like, | II turn the key.
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12
LITTLE LOCALS.

Friday evening Salem Democrats
N set at Grange hall to organize their
club. THE Arlington gives ball al
Reeds opera house the l8th.-Wednes-
dIy.----Arbor day at all the schools to-
M brow. .----Get one Of those Water
house cherry trees at the postoffice, -
Toe crowds were out at the Salem
newspaper offices late last night whoop.
Ing 1t up for the ticket and hurrahing
for Lord. The ex-priest Rudolph
le lures again tonight at 25 cents.
NJ * Buren, returned from business
trip at Portland this morning. John
b. GIesy, of Aurora, is in the city today.
Rev. and Mrs. Hutchison, John
NJ Dir and Mrs. r. s. Wallace and son,
Paul, returned today from the Presby-
terry at Corvallis. Hunter FOrsythe,
of Marion,i is In the city. "A. g. Raw
Inns, Of Lebanon, was today appointed
a notary public.
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12

recognized no civil power and declafeo
that salvation could not be had except
IN the church Of Rome. Bishop Gil
more, Of Cleveland, O., had sought to
exercise bIs authority over him,
Rudolph. He bad asked, where is your
authority? He claimed 1t from the
Pope. But where bad the Pope his
authority from2 He could not tell.
At this point collection was taken
up, by number.
II Romsnism ever gained the ascend
ency in the United States, there would
be more people burned than ever in the
Spanish inquisilion. There would not
be wood enough, but they would erect
crematOries, fired by natural gas and
burn them by wholesale. In a mags-
zine, Brownson's Review, May 1864, it
said the Pope intended to possess this
country. He was running our public
schools. Monsignor CapeIl had said
Catholics would some day refuse to pay
school taxes. 10 Wisconsin two years
ago the bishops and the deluded Luthe-
ran priests ordered their churches to
vote solid to defeat the Bennett law.
Last year the f lwards law was de-
feated by the Catholics and Lutherans.
In every state the Romanists were
making fight on the public school
system. The American school system
Is denounced and condemned by this
church. He was very severe on the
Irish Catholics and the hooded and
beaded sisters who taught the children
to sing Hail Mary" instead Of "Hail
Columbia" Ia Troy, n. Y, twenty
one Protestant ladies were discharged
without cause and Irish Catholic en-
ployed. Were Catholic children any
better than Protestants? He offered a
challenge Of thousand dollars to any
priest who would refute his statements.
In this church 1t was pay or be d-d.
The fight was not of the cross and the
crown against the crescent. 1t was
secret Catholicism, Romish superstition
and idOlatry, against American liberty,
peace and happiness. The letters 1. H.
). in Catholic and often in Protestant
churches, were the passwords of the
early Christians when they met in
secret. They were originally five let
ters, aud meant Ichthyo-Or, fish. All
the connection of religion with the
church of Rome was their eating fish
on Friday. He would fight any church
which sought to get control of Ameri-
can liberty aud that he charged was
the ambition of the Catholic church.
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12
THE REPUBLICAN PLATFORM

Democracy CRITICISED Finance Plank
international Bimetallism - Nj.
caragua oanal-and Foreign Immi-
ation-Economic Reform in State
Affairs.
"The representatives of the Republi-
cans of the state of Oregon, In conven-
ton assembled, call attention to the
conditions of industry aRd business
through the country, as proof OF the
necessity of returning to the policy of
the Republican party, under which
there was general prosperity during
thirty years.
"We re-affirm the principles of the
Republican national platform of 1892,
aud assert that the results that followed
the change decreed by the election 8
of that year, have justified our prote, t
against the national policy announced
by the Democratic party.
"We affirm that a policy of consist
ent protection is necessary for the
advancement and conservation Of our
industrial interests; for the assurance
to labor Of steady employment aud
adequate wages; for the promotion and
maintenance of prosperity, local and
general. We point to the past, aud to
the contrast furnished by the present,
in support of this claim; aud we CEN
sure and condemn the Democratic
tariff program, as developed in con-
gress, as highly Injurious TO the pro.
ductive and Industrial interests of the
country, and In particular, as hurtful
to those of our own state.
ave denOunce the action of the
Democratic party in congress for its
discrimination against producers In our
fields, forests and mines, and ia favor
OF particular classes OF manufactures,
chiefly in the East, aud Of special in
terest Ia the South.
ave reafflrm the doctrine Of the Re
publican party in relation to money, as
stated in the national platform of 1892.
particularly as follows, to-wit; The
American people, from tradition aud
Interest, favor bimetalism, aud the Re-
publican party demands the uses of
both gold aud silver, as standard money
with such restrictions and under such
provisions, to be determined by legisla.
tion, as will secure the maintenance
Of parity Of values OF the two metals, |
so that the purchasing and debt paying
power Of the dollar, whether OF silver,
gold on paper, shall be at all tunes |
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12

equal. The interests Of the pfoducefs
Of ths country, its farmers and Its
workingmen, demand that every dol
lar, paper or coin, issued by the gov
eminent, shall be as goJd as any other
1--WE commend the efforts made By
our government, hitherto, TO secure an
! international conference to Adopt such
measures as will insure parity of value
between gold aud silver, throughout
the world, aud call upon it to renew
and continue such efforts.
"The construction of the Nicaragua
canal is Of the highest importance to
the American people, b th as meas
ure of national defense and to build up
and maintain American commerce. 1t
is moreover Of special importance to
our Pacific States, and we favor its
construction as speedily rs possible by
the government Of the United States" l"
1--WE demand the enactment of rigid
restrictions ON the foreign immigration
both for the protection of our country
against illiterate and vicious classes
from foreign lands and for the protec-
ton of our labor and preservation to our
own people of the remainder of our
national domain; and to these ends we
call for suitable capitation tax upon all
immigrants"
"IH our state affairs we demand the
closest security and economy in expen-
ditures. We condemn the pro1igality
and excess of past legislatures and call
upon the next legislative assembly to
keep all appropriations within the linn
its Of the most economical sdministra-
ton Of consistent efficiency. The Of
fees Of the administrative departments
Of the state have become too ex pensive
aud their Expenses must be re-
duced. When the constitution fixes a
salary, only the constitutional salary
should be paid, without additional emol-
uments. The practice of employing
necessary clerks and of paying fees in
excess of just payment for services
needed or rendered has become an
abuse that must be cut Off, and we
pledge the Republican party to the
prosecution and accomplishment of this
reform. District attorneys aud other
officials should be paid fixed salaries,
since the payment of fees encourages
litigation and entails upon tax payers
heavy and needless expense.
1--WE commend the policy of the Re-
publican party In relation to internal
improvements, and in particular in
opening our waterways to commerce,
and we denounoe the illiberality of the
Democratic party in these important
matters.
Experience in our fisheries has
shown that to prevent the wholesale
destruction of fish, all fish traps, fish
wheels and fish seines, and all other
gear now In use except gill nets, should
be abolished"
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12
New Church Articles.

A meeting was held last night and
Well attended by the membership OF
the Congregational church TO receive
the report OF the special committee on
Incorporation, heretofore appointed foI
that purpose. The report set up the
fact of the churoh's incorporation
legally, ON December 26, 1898, and also
a line OF by-laws, which were passed
upon section by section, aud referred to
a committee on printing, which was
selected by the meeting.
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12
Presbyterian Entertainment.
Pushing the Mute sohool.

The plans Of s. f. Maxon, Of Port
land, have been adopted by the board
Of trustees Of the Oregon school for deaf
mutes, for the new building desired to
be erected upon the recently pur-
chased site Of 100 acres east of Salem
about four miles. 1t will be remem-
bered that the board advertised for
plans for this building and they were
submitted on the first day OF March.
Mr.. Maxon's was chosen In preference
% fourteen othera submitted.
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12

Ny friend, look herel You know how wea d
ana nervous your wife Is, and you know thai
Carriers lron Pills will relieve her, now why
not De lair about Il and buy her a box?
A woman who Is weak, nervous and sleeD
less, aud who has cold hands and feet. cannoi
ieei ana act Ike we'll persOn. Carriers Inn
rllls equatlLe the circulation, remove nervous
ness. ana give strength and rest
mans wife should always be the same. as
peclAlly 70 n husband. but II she Is wea 4 and
nervous, and uses Carters Iuon Pills. she can,
not oe, for they make her "feel like d sifferent
pefsoh, 50 they All say, and their husbands
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12
Just Received.

A fresh invoice OF the American
Biscuit Co.'S high teas, vanilla waters
dainty chips, arrowroot, current ten
bridge, ginger waters, and oaten waters
For luncheon, tea parties, ETC., thes'
goods arc unexcelled We carry thu
best line ln town.
HARRITT Il LAWRENCE,
3dlw 20l Commercial street.
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-04-12
JOHN HUGHES.

Dealer in Groceries, Paints,
oils, Window Glass, ,Varnishes
and the most complete stock Of
Brushes Of all Kinds in the
State. Artists Matel ials, Lime,
Hair, Cement and Shingles and
finest quality OfGRASS SEEDS