Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1894-10-04
srrinkles OF spec.


used to have before tramps got so
thick. Good News.
Il WAS not aware that you knew
him" said Tom Snack to an Irish
friend the other day. @Knew hin!"
he exclaimed. II knew him when
his father was a boy"-,rid-B Bits.
ENeRossED-"I wonder IL it is true
that the Browns are keeping two
servants instead OF one." II guess
SO. don't see Mrs. Brown 90 out
any more. Truth.
AT PRIzE-sHocTINa. -Rifaman
(after repeated misses) - "Donuer
wetter II those rascally fellows
haven't gone and stuck up the target
in the wrong place again. "-Unser
Gesellschaft
WHEN we saw the good man stand
ing with the twins in his arms and
singing "Let Cares Like a Wild Del
uge Come" we knew the great relig-
ious convention was spiritual sue
cess. Plain Dealer
WIFE, must go to the doctor; 1
fear I've got dropsy. weigh $50
pounds. Observation-Disclosures were you
weighed? Wife-On your coal scales.
Husband-Then. don't worry; your
weight is normal. Truth.
In the White Mountains: "By
Jove, what superb view there Is
from here!" said wilkins. EYES,"
said Dawkins. @Tell me one of your
jokes now, will you? 1 fancy l could
see it up here. "-Harper's Bazaar.
ENFANT TERRIBLE-Proud Father
Ito friend -"This is my youngest
boy. Frank. this is Mr.. Jackson!"
Frank (brightly)-"Is that the man
who mamma said yesterday had more
money than brains?"-Truth.
MRS. There is one thing
about the outlook don't like" Mrs.
Jenkyns-"What is it?" Mrs. Smythe
-"The United States Senate may be
abolished before we become eligible
to membership Brooklyn Life.
BINAwAY-And young Blower, the
fellow who was always Boosting that
he would yet do something to arouse
the country: what ever became Of
him? Stadehome - Manufacturing
alarm clocks the last we heard
Buffalo Courier.
In the Adirondacks: "If you
should lose your way in these woods,
Jack, what would you do?" "Walk
straight ahead" said Jack. "The
world is rounded. and I'd be sure to
get back home that way sooner or
later "-Harper's Young People.
JAMES, have you poured the Amer
lean champagne into the imported
bottles?" "Ez shure ez me name is
Moike, num-" "Well, you can put
the cobwebs on the bottles now, and
then practice your English accent for
the rest Of the afternoon. Truth.
"YoU don't seem to think that was
very good story just told you"
he said in disappointed tone. ooh,
yes, indeed do" replied the Boston
girl, reassuringly. @But / was just
trying to think when that was prob
ably translated from the Greek. =
Detroit Free Press
JENNIE, said Mr.. Younghusband,
"each Of these clothes-bags has got
hole in the bottom of it," what
clothes-bags? We haven't any
clothes-bags "Why, what's this I've
been putting my collars and cuffs in
all this week." "Why, George! That's
the sleeve to my ball-dress!"-Har-
per's Bazaar.
"THE sins of the father" etc.
Tommy (studying his lessonl-@I say,
pa, where does the Merrimac rise.
and into what sea does it empty?"
Pal don't know, my son." Tom
my-"You don't know? And to-mor-
row the teacher will lick me on ac-
count Of your ignorance. Harlem
Life.
Mr.. MEEKER-It grieves me sore
ly, my son, to learn that you tell I'M
truths. Take Washington, for ex-
ample. He never found it necessary
to lie. Junior Meeker-I know it,
father, but in his day there wasn't
anything to lie about. He never
tried to trade an air gun for BIZ
cycle. Boston Courier.
MADE it manifest: yes, said the
eminent clergyman. Il nearly left
the pulpit once to embark in mer-
camille business. but the Lord wished
me to continue his work" slow did
you know He did?" @My congrega-
tion offered me $4,000 a year-and
that was $4,000 more than l was
offered in business Brooklyn Life.
In all policies Of life insurance
these, among host of other ques-
tions, occur: age of father, IL liv-
ing? Age OF mother, IL livinp?" A
man in the country filed up his
fathers age, "if living" 112 years,
and his mothers 1O2 The agent was
amazed at this, and fancicd he had
secured an excellent customer, Tut
feeling somewhat dubious. he re-
marked that the applicant came of a
very long-lived family. "Oh, you
see, SIR" replied he, my parents died
many years ago, but III living would
be aged as there put down. It'd.