St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1894-04-15
MEDILL,a pANACEA.

Nt+
MEDlLL's PANACEA.
+ dHOr 10 Mcdill has made discov-
cry. Rather. he has rediscovered dis
covery that some other man made loug
ago. and which got lost in the medley OF
discoveries which have dslugeI the
world in this blessed century. Some
years ago the editor Of the Tribune
found out that he wasn't as vigorous as
OF yoie. that his hair was whitening aud
his joints Were losing their limberness.
and that aches and pains were taking
up their abode In them. Joseph, as tho
constant readers of the Tribune know,
IS OF an inquiring turn of MUD and
given to investigating unusual phenom-
ena, aud this novel change in his own
especial domain started him off ON an
investigation Why this was thus.
Asking his physician why these things
were. the learned disciple of Galen told
him that it was because he was getting
old. but why should get old?" persist
ed the inquisltiye and unsatisfied editor.
and the doctor gave it up. Not so
Joseph. He ranSacked his library and all
the village libraries in Chicago for some
book which discussed this very interest,"
ing question. and found no light out of
the past. He started his bookseller on
ahuntamong the libraries of the country
In fruitlesS search. Then he turned
his search light ON the booksheIves of
Europe. Finally, after many years in
response to his inquiries there came to
him all English book written by soma
one with a long string of capital letters
| after his name, indicating that sundry
| learned societies esteemed the writer
worthy of association with them This
forgotten book was devoted to proving
that the arch enemy of life after the
period of adolescence was reached is
| lime simply nothing but lime.
| The book came and saw and conquered
| Mediil. 1t revealed to him the secret OF
all his ailments; 1t pointed an unerring
ringer at the source of those rheumatic
twinges i'll his joints; it demonstrated
that old age is nothing but surcharge
of lime encrusting the nerves ana
muscles and vital organs, just as it en-
cruSts the tea kettles and the boilers of
our engines. 1t is carried by the blood
into all parts of the body. 1t is dep0S-
tied in che Joints. driving out the lubri-
| cants which smooth their action aud
make them supple, and causes friction
which results III pain aud In difficulty of
| motion.
But how escape the deluge of lime?
| 1t is i'll everything The water we
drink has it in varying proportions; it
IS In the bread We eat, the potatoes we
love. the meats We relish. the vegetables
which give variety 10 our tables and
tickle our palateS-aii have their due
| proportion of this destructive substance.
Nature has impregnated everything
| with 1t. She has scattered it through
the soils and the grasses, and plants
send out their roots and suck it up in
their sap and mix it ia the corn and
wheat SO deftly that it is inseparable.
! When we see what care the old dame
| took to get lime into us. aud learn now
| what mischief she works in us with it.
we almost regret that the author of
| MedilPs book was not born at a time
when DE codld have counseled Nature;
| and il he could not have prevailed ON
| her to forego lining the human race, he
| might at least have put mankind Oh
| their guard untold centuries ago, an
| saved us all these miSeries of our late +
| years, when the lime we needed in youth
| to build up the framework of bones be-
| comes not only useless but positively
| Injurious.
| Mr.. Medill pondered long on the
| remedy. 1t is probable that he may
have contemplated ali appeal to that
! omniscicnt power, the congress. for some
| act of protection against lime-a sup
position ouly rendered probable by his
we'll known advocacy OF the power of
that body to make everybody rich by
taxing them. But whatever he may
have contemplated, what he did was to
HE himself off to California and have
an analysis made of the water, which, to
his chagrin, he found contained thirty
grains of lime to the gallon, as against
only nineteen in the waters at the 81 X
mile intake at Chicago. Then he found
lake up in the mountains which look
down on his Southern retreat whose
waters were fed 10y the melting SHOWS.
and which, as Nature had neglected to
provide means of evaporating lime,
were free from it. And here is the vet
eran editor, with his llme-encrusted
joints, drinking the lmeless waters of
his mid-heaven lake, and gradually
dlluting the lime in his system with it,
and by Natures processes Kidding him
self of It, and reganing. as the lime de-
parts, his youthful suppleress.
But for all the rest of us poor mortals,
tied by our empty purses to lime-mixed
diet, what relief is there? We cannot go to
California; we cannot flee to the mount
aims nearer us: we can't even afford to
have the lime-free waters brought from
mountain lakes to us. We might, in
deed, eat snow in winter if the smoke
ordinance were enforced and we could
have snow and coal dust on separate
plates; but what good would that do if
we had to take in lime with everything
we ate and drank during the remaining
months? There seems no escape here.
and all that is left is the hope that in
the next world there will be no lime.
The experience OF the state of South
Carolina as grog-shop keeper will
probably be sufficient to deter other
states from making the attempt to run
the liquor traffic. The government has
responsibility enough already, without
endeavoring to assume the duty of sup
plying its citizens with distilled poison
aud incipient crime.
-
A COXEYITE ELEGY.