Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1894-02-21

II WILL CALL YOU HAN FUR SHORT"
brings 2 cents pound over the market
price and that folks send fur three miles
around to git my soft soap, and where
would eddecashun benefit me any?"
In January, 1SS-, Farmer Simmons
"took on" hired man named William
Burt. The man was fairly well educated
and great reader, and ON several occa-
sions he read extracts from different
books to the farmer and his wife. Both
of them were quite interested in the life
of Washington, and the farmer himself
became SO enthusiastic over the doings of
the great patriot that one evening he
slapped his leg and exclaimed:
"Wall, | swan, but he was consid-
cradle of feller after all, and mebbe
he'd hev made purity good farmer! Say,
Bill, was he a self made MANI"
"Iguess he was"
Then he was all right, and ne and
him wouldn't hev no trouble. Licked
the British in most every fight, you sayT
He did
Crossed the Delaware with the ice
Jest a boomin down, eh?'
Yes"
And finally got to be president of the
United States?"
Yes"
Wall, that's purity smart - purity
smart-a leetle better than | hev done
myself, though he p'obably never had a
run of typhoid fever to sot him back"
A day or two before Washington's
birthday the hired man had to go away
for several days. Farmer Simmons had
only one holiday and that was Fourth of
July, and even then he didn't knock off
work until o'clock in the afternoon.
He knew about the anniversary, because
he had heard some one speak Of it. On
the 22d of February he was repairing the
barnyard gate and thinking what the
hired man had read about Washington
when stranger on foot came along. He
was tramp Of the first water, but he
knew thing or two about history. By
way of introducing himself he loosely
said:
"Bein it's my birthday, think you
orter set me out square meal and gim-
me pocketful of apples to boot"
Your birthday, eh?" queried the farm
er. "Why, bless me, but you can't be
George Washington"
Cant I? Why not?"
"Because-why, durn my hide, but
you may be, after ALL Did you lick the
British?"
"a dozen times over, and will do it
again if necessary"
Ibid you cross the Delaware?"
you betr'
BY gum, but Bill read that to me
outer a bookr'
"Yes, it's right in the books. I'm trav-
elm around the country to see how folks
git along. Excuse my looks, but I'm in
disguise. don't keer about everybody
KNOWN who am, as they'd raise great
fuss over me-"
81 see," thoughtfully replied the farm
or. "Accordin to what Bill read in the
book you was 'lected president. Couldn't
hev bin lately, as | remember back to
Buchanan"
"That was an error in the print" ex-
planned the tramp. "They offered to
make me president, but l declined with
thanks. l had too much other bizness
on hand. Some of the books hev got it
that l was actually elected. You seem
to be smart, go ahead sorter feller.
Reckon you are gittin along the best of
any farmer in this county"
81 don't want to brag," replied the
farmer, highly pleased at the words,
"but | don't think I'm fur behind the
best of 'em. Never went to skule but
three days, and begun life on shillins,
and yet here am!''
Wonderful-wonderful 1t does me
good to meet sich a man. | think III
stop and take dinner with you. You
must promise, however, to call me
George. There must be no formality.
you know. What's your given nameT
"My names Samuel"
"Well, Sam, I'll stop and hev bite
with you Iwant to talk with you and
git your opinion on how this country
orter be run. An opinion from slch a
man as you is of more value than the
opinions of 40 other men combined"
/ No one had ever told Farmer Simmons
that George Washington was dead, and
the hired man had read nothing in the
book to that effect. He had dim idea
that Washington, Grant and Lincoln all
had something to do with the late war
but he wasn't sure whether all were
dead or whether all were living. He &C
cepted the tramp for what he claimed te
be and led the way to the house.
"Why, Samuel, we hain't nuthln ful
tramps" exclaimed the wife as sht