Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1894-06-16
TOO MUCH LIBERTY.
THIS is SAID IN REFERENCE TO
AMERICAN GIRLS.

Mothers are not without Blame in the
Mattcr-Some French Customs Submit
tcd for Consideration In That Country
They Seem to Have Better Regulations.
There is hardly question that the
liberty accorded to our girls has taken
nn the color of unreStraincd license
lays Il late writer. 1t is Il mercy that
lnry are endowed with exceptional
observation-disclosures and that they possess
II remarkable degree of Scf-rcliancc
else we should see them involve them
selves i'll far more misery than now
falls To their lot This license is view
ed with amazement by Europeans and
with no little uneaSineSS by thought
full Americans, especially that phase
of it which seems to take girls quite
beyond the pale of parental restraint
in tn" selection of suitorS. 1t is il
mistake to cultivate y-mouthrd-
ness about it. one might almost as
Srrt that in Il ma iority of homes are
girls who make-and brcak-matri-
mOnial engagements without the cog
nizancc of their parents, and in Il
mood of tlippant disregard of one of
III" solemnest obligations of life. In
this regard they seem to be devoid of
the moral sense and to hold personal
honor more cheaply than the rice
powder with which they cover their
noses. Perhaps the author of The
Heavenly Twins carries her theory
too far. but who can doubt the fundI
mental wisdom of the French unwrit
len family law as it applied to girls
and marriage? A woman name and
station unknown who seems to have
thought wisely and well on this sub
lrct says:
Women enjoy greater dignity and
authority in the homc-lifc of France
than that of any other nation: all of
which proves that American mothers
al" S,ngularly neglcctful of some of
lhrir duties. For example, we regard
it as arlful slightly wicked. and de-
rdrdly low, to take any part what
ever in influencing the love affairs of
"ur daughters. From their babyhood
No exercise all possible knowledge
lad experience in choosing the best
ftctorS conducive to health. are faS-
dionS as to playmatcS, nurses and
t"nChc'S. rear them dclicately, daint-
ily. and to he utterly dependent. when
Suddenly. as they pass over an i'm
aE:nIry boundary into young lady
hood. we withdraw all support, lcav
in~ il To luck to work out their matri-
r'rnial salvation. Nine out of ten
American mothers would warmly dis
claim any special knowledge of their
daughters Suitors. and blush if ac-
rnSrd of taking the least part in adj
rlncing or diScouraging the attentions
- one man more than another. Now,
il The American girl possessed a pa
tent. infallble heart instinct. war
rlnted to discern good parti by the
nf oft .,r md
sign. this would do very we'll But
after relying for guidance on other
F""plc all of her life, she has only
rApric"S to depend upon in so vital a
question. Should her choice be I'M
'"tunat", Il family imbro=lio is the
result. which usually ends in the girls
''t.n- her own way with abundant
hi>"ry later on.
In France. where Il man seeks an
lnir1IUCtion into Il family of Young
:: riS. H. is questioned closely as to
his fitness for that honor. DsSpatcd
habits. inability To support Il wife,
S''T."U> hereditary diseases. or Il stain
'p"n h> past utterly dcbarS him from
~" Snrirty of a irune file And very
r"pp"rly 50. for in spite of any or all
# these disabilities he may be per-
>'Hal'y attractive and thereby cause
l.
Notwithstanding the advanced at
stud" we have assumed. we all agree
Hlt II y" happily married is the very
h'St '"t which falls to any woman. |
fail then to see why it's more honor
"hl" ANA highmindcd for Il mother to
'"n"r" til" susceptibility of her young
t!u%hlrr'S affections than to take
every legitimate means to secure her
- advantageous alliance French
:"rl> ar" seldom forced into diStaSte-
fol marriages. such coercion being
l'rG"iy Il foreign fiction. but parents
N'ry prnr@rly conSiurr the matter too
Important To be delegated solely to
Chance. \ careful study of French
- ms would not come amiSS to the
- 'Ih""S of our girls and sure | am
1''nt they will learn some things to
i''rir profit. | myself diSapprove of
~ French method in detail. vet doubt
hr,lrr eur course is any nearer the
rant on" We are unreasonable
''o""h t. Introduce an unSophiSticat-
S.'h""l graduate into general So
Getty. allow emotional fancy to gov
en- her choice of associates. and then
''DrCt wisdom to be displayed in the
lAnst m"mcntouS decision of her life
Th"r" are mothers who have clear
"'nS of tn" kind of marriage it is pos
hlr and desirable that their daugh-
'"> should make. They give their
r'> III" training which fits them for
sch marriage. they frown on all
n les rablc associations. and foster all
:1it meet their wishes. Their daugh-
- almost always marry and lead
''''" table and comfortable lives. 1t
mt 80 certain that they lead lives
enthusiasm.
Vet il is hardly fair to laugh at such
''thH"$ and call them matchmakers.
y often know their children better
IN the children know themselves,
II is very well that the elders
>'nr'l guide the choice. though it
'"ll b" intolcrablc if they made the
"''>ioa. \ woman who loves her
'''! must try TO secure the child's
''r mss according to her light. If
: h;&h-mindcd. and wishes her
: ''"h'C" to marry Il noble man. she
10y! " Use base means. If she wishes
'~'Ni.tN Il selfish ambition, she cam
- us" worthy means.
u Is. hnWcver a great mistake to
! . RI grow up with the idea that
go WI be sure to marry. or worse
Il. tAat she ought to marry On the
- 10y. pains should be taken to
'"h her to choose we'll 10y keeping a
1"l standard before her. while Il few
lions words should be said to her
N tine to time. Unfortunately few