The united opinion. [volume] (Bradford, Vt.) 1881-1970, 1894-12-21
Special from South Ryegate.

One of our esteemed citizens living
in the Lime Kiln neighborhood ha
made requisition on the Fish Com
missioner for a whale for the Lev
James brook. We had not expected
such strain on the commission at g
early date. The whale will have tt
go up the Connecticut river to Wells
River. thence up Wells River to Soutf
Ryegate. thence up the Swamp road to
the Crow place.
There will be no serious obstacle I'M
til the whale reaches Wells River
where it will have to run the gauntlet
of the Fish and Game League at that
place, if the whale survives this try
ing ordeal he will pass the paper mill,
Aikens & Leonard's saw mill and
reaching the falls at Boltonville where
the Commissioner will have to take into
his council all the farmers who signed
the petition against the saw dust
dumping into Wells River headed by
Nat Robinson, Geo. Nelson and Mr..
Vance. 1t will be found necessary to
side.track the whale to pass the falls,
and everything will 60 smoothly until
the South Ryegate creamery is reached
when the devil will be to pay. David
Lumsden, Peach Thomas and Rob.
Lackie will be on hand to see how the
passage of whale through a creamery
will effect their test, and the upshot of
the whole business will be that Chief
Justice A. M. Peach assisted by Judge
Lamphere and Esquire A. D.. Felch
will hold a court. By the time the
legal machinery is in running order
the whale will get headed down stream
and the Commissioner after him full
tilt, and great commotion will be the
result. The whale will gain on the
Commissioner for about four years,
when it will be observed that the Com
missioner will pullin ahead Nth colors
flying. Meanwhile the whale will be
returned as far as South
Ryegate and kept in training by Fred
horse trot.
The aforesaid court will rise, pro-
coed to the largest vacant granite shed
irrigate itself, replevin the Commits
sioner and dig for the woods. By
this time Frank Dalton will be return
ed from the Worlds Fair, George
Stephens V. s., and John Thomas, V.
S. also will be on hand and insist on
treating the whale for blind staggers
and scratchers, this treatment will be
only fairly begun when Lee Quint and
Jack Randall will appear on the scene
and pronounce it tuberculosis, John
D. McAllister will order out the fire
and several barrels of
tubercoline will be injected, this oper-
alton will disgust the whale and in
.wenty-three hours he is dead whale.
This will necessitate an autopsy, the
sage of No. IL, otherwise known as the
prophet of the Lime Kiln, will hold
he inquest, and the verdict will be
died of the town system of schools"
Thus ANONYMOUSLY will fade from
Mortal gaze scarlet chapter in the
ocal history of the Universe From
he smoke and debris of this grand
consumation of all things,
here will rise up on the vast surface
If bald headed and regenerated
earth, quartette of radiant celestials
Known as the "No. 90" "No. 49,"
South Corinth" and ga subscriber"
who shall stand on the four quarters
# the earth alone in their glory. No
Mortal ear shall hear, nor eye see the |
various phases of the school question !
or there will be no school in those
lays, and down the dim vista of the
ges will be seen the Vermont senate |
# 1894 fleeing from the wrath to
ONE. "GIyE US A REST"