Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1894-09-23
NOCTURNAL SINGERS.
Still, Small Voices That Speak Elo'
Quently at Night.
MUSICAL MOSQUITOES
Misery Melted Out by Malicious Mutiia'
tArs OF Human Flesh-It IL the
Female "skecter." Too.

"Vautiui little song entitieu MY bunny
Lies Over the Ocean," The mere state
ment OF the fact that the "Bonny" of
me person in question is keeping up his
record for mendacity on the other side
OF the pond is In Itself consoling, though
/ have always found most satisfaction in
those lines where the lyric writer adds,
In more pathetic strain:
Last night as lay on my pillow.
l dreamed that my Bonny was dead"
This always did please me, though to
save my life I can't see what business
the author had laying on his Tor her)
shuck couch I want to lay on the bed
not on the pillow. In fact, l hardly see
now l could. by any contortlons, lay
myself on a pillow. or a bolster either,
for that matter. No wonder the person
In question had bad dreams. IL l were
10 undertake 70 slumber on such a linn
ited area l think ! would have enough
nightmares to pull all the street-cars in
Virginia, and positively my dreams would
be 80 bad that think / would get down
10 business In time on the following
day Possibly you will explain the re-
markable passage in question by saying
IL is poetic license. Well, IL that's the
case I'm glad the law forces a man
who contemplates laying on his pillow to
get out d lcanse, and l hope 1t Is an
expensive one, too for don't want the
habit to become universal. A beds good
enough for me-leastwise IL used to be,
until the evils OF which l am about to
speak began. But hearken to my tale of
woe.
After consultation with a number OF
sour most prominent citizens every
man who gets his name In the newspa-
pers Is "a most prominent citiZen'). fnd
that, despite the financial depression ana
the drought, the mosquito crop this year
has surpassed our most sangune expec-
tations. III fact, we feel that We have
gotten more than we deserve. You can
flush a covcy Of "skeeters'' In most any
house in Richmond now, and the assidu-
BUSINESS with which they attend to duty
Is something worthy Of the highest COM
mendation. In fact, 1t quite embarrasses
me TO note their energy and persever-
eTce. A few nights ago these little
winged musicians gave an oratorio in
my room, and such were its merits that
stayed awake all night to hear II. Ever
and anon some slim wasted Adelina
Patti would make n farewell tour to-
wards my face and take therefrom a
souvenir OF the expedition. while she In
turn would be succeeded by graceful
Jenny Lind, who. though musical by
nature, had enough business instinct 10
send In her bill'' to me as charge for
the entertainment. The music was su-
perb that evening, and yet, paradoxical
as II may seem, the entertainment was
the most boring l have ever attended.
In fact. every mosquito who took part
in the affair bored me, and when day
broke | was perforated like a sieve.
You could have sifted -four through me.
My friend Colonel Thomas Whitehead,
the Commissioner of Agriculture, few
days ago expressed himself to me as
highly pleased with the mosquito
crop in Virginia this season. He
brightest expectations. and he ap-
pears to believe that II things keep up
as they are now doing the Old Dominion
will vie with New Jersey in producing
the energetic musicians. The Commits
soper of Agriculture, though by no means
c.T0;gicrd against "the female scx," Is
responsible for the assertion that IL Is only
the lady mosquitoes who do the singing,
and he furthermore AYERS that 1t Is ike
wise the fair SEX who do the biting.
The gentlemen "skeeters" stay at home,
/ presume, and tend to the babies-a duty
not easily to be performed, | should
imagine. for in each family there are
about thousand little ones. Mosquitoes
breed very rapidly, and II is no uncom-
mon thing for the youngsters upon re-
turning home from school to find that
their household has been increased by
A. 1f Httla hrot barQ n cis-
ters. A female "skeeter' becomes a de-
butante twenty-four hours after her birth
about the same time required for a girl
baby to be introduced nowadays, and
forthwith sings in oratorio and performs
surgical operations on suffering human
ity.
Persons familiar with entomology tell
us that mosquitoes rear their families In
pools OF stagnant water, where the larvae
are deposited and subsequently come forth
to pay their devoirs TO mankind. For
my part | never could understand how
anything that Is reared in water could
have such a thirst for gore. When de-
butante "skeeters" go of to make a
night of IT. (woman's suffrage runs high
with them and the males are disfran-
chseD they have high old time, and fire.
0utullJ near one Dtllt lIllllilS W
other THE drinks are on me-" where
upon they both drop by my nose and
proceed to take dig at my complexion.
Assurediy / have certainly given my
blood TO my country In the last few days.
l cannot bid adleu 10 the interesting sub
ject OF my winged musical friends with
out adding a few encomiums for the
Venetian "skeeter." which, like the city
by the sea, are veritable queens OF the
Adriatic." Graceful as the gondolas and
as musical as the chimes that ring In the
picturesque town. they add no little to
the charm OF the place, and any one who
visits Venice cannot fall TO be impressed
with their energy and Importance. Never
shall l forget the night when first l laid
my golden curls upon the pillow In the
historic city and sought slumber. II was
like looking for a needle In a hay-stack-
that job of seeking slumber-for whole
colony OF mosquitoes dropped in to pay
their respects, and they spent the entire
evening with me. And they were hum
mers,' too! They hovered and futtered
around me like the cherubs that frisk
around the Madonna In Murlllo's I'm
macuate Conception" and there was an
something in their soft.
italian accents which made me bid slum-
ber adieu and devote my whole attention
to the visitors. AS the little ditty says:
"They sang the song of home, sweet
home:
song that reached my heart"
Seriously speaking, and 1t Is a very
serious matter, mosquitoes are more nu-
merous this year than have ever known
them TO be. While / have not taHen a
census OF the exact population, l gather
my ideas from the number OF perfora-
tons that have marked my psrson each
day when l arise TO face the duties Of
life. There Is no way OF accounting for
their presence, unless 1t be that the long
spell OF hot weather has proved a sort
Or resurrection period for many who left
US earlier In the season. And then, too,
people allow too much stale water to
collect in the various receptacles on their
premises. Let US put our shoulders to the
wheel and enter vigorous crusade
against water. Whiskey Is good enough
for me. THE IDLE REPORTER.
SOME APPLE RECEIPTS.
Delicate Dishes That Are Particularly
Seasonable.