The Olneyville tribune. (Providence, R.I.) 1893-189?, 1894-01-20

II lItTe : any lHlup iHdb "tdIltS
me-" said the Pullman porter, who
was i'm IA communicative mood, cts
these jokes in the papers about por-
tiers making big money"
They are exaggerations, are
they?"
II should say they are. Now take
this trip, for instance; I've only
made fourteen dollars and seventy
five cents. There was a lot Of women
on board, and they hardly ever tip a
fellow. - Judge.
DOUBTFUL BLISS.
"Y-a-a-s," said Willie Wibbles,
with a smile, about which there
lurked "A shade Of sadness. IL am
suah that Miss Scrirpins wegards me
verwy kindly; possibly, even with
affection"
What makes you think SOP"
You know how fond she is Of that
poodle Jack Perkins gave her on her
birthday"
Yes"
"Well, she told me lawst evening
thao had ways that reminded her
so much Of that poodle. - Washing
ton Star.
AN EXPERTS VIEW.
Artist painted this picture, sir,
tO keep the wolf from the door.
Dealer (after inspecting it)-Well,
can see it, and he'll skip quick
enough Detroit Free Press.
MEAN OF HIM.
Mrs. Peachblow-Why does your
husband carry such "A tremendous
amount Of life insurance when he's
in such perfect health?
me. Men are naturally cruel
Life.
A PULLING QUESTION.
How is your wife and family COM
ing on?" asked am absent-minded
Harlemite of Gus DE Smith.
II beg your pardon, but I'm not
married, - replied Gus.
'"rhat's so. | forgot. Weller
how long have you not been mar
ried?"-T Texas Siftings.
DOING HIS BEST.
what | want" said the anarchist,
lis reform"
And that" replied the police JUS
tice, lis what you're going to get, if
there is any moral efficacy in Jail
discipline"
HOW TO FOIL HIM.
How i'm the world, " asked a Har-
lem lady Of a neighbor, "can / pre-
vent my boy from stealing sugar out
of the sugar-bowl and swigging the
milk out of the milk pitcher"
IL know how you can stop him.,
was the reply.
"How?''
by simply putting the milk in the
sugar-bowl and the sugar in the milk
pitchcr?"-[Texas Siftings.
\ WISE GENERAL.
Merchant-Why the deuce don't
you shut the door?
Insurance Agcnt-Do you think
I'm fool enough to cut of my re-
treat?
IT'S AN Ill WIND
Larkin-Don't you think this crank
epidemic is dreadful?
Borrowe-Quite the contrary, my
boy. Just as soon rs n dun shows up
nowadays | simply send for the po-
lice. Dreadful? It's a blessing in
Disguise Puck.
BARGAIN AMI SALE.
Mrs. Winks-When is Miss Hard
cash to marry the Count?
Mrs. Binks-On Monday.
Mrs. Winks-Oh. Of course! |
might have known Monday is a bar
gain day.-[Ncw York Weekly.
HUNTED ITEM.
Hunter-Wcll. farmer, you told us
your place was Il good place for hunt
ing: now We have tramped it for three
hours and found no game.
Farmer-Just SO. | calculate, as
Il general thing, the less game there
is the more hunting you have, SO |
uOI l ste Nlul YOU dA' NlNNl'- "'pN'''
= Texas Siftings.
40 WONDER.
Pipkin-rhcy tell a story about
Chappie getting full the other night
and attempting to blow his brains
out.
Potts-With what result?
Pipkin-Nevcr touched en-.
PREDICTION FULFILLED.
Mrs. Jason-Lord "A mercy! That
there Jimpson boy has gone and
bowed hisself up with a dynamite
cartridge.
Mr.. jason alters said that boy
would spread hisself some of these
days.-[Indianapolis Journal.
wEAK WOMAN.
Mrs. Gumpps-What do you think