davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
A Preachers Blunder.

The startling mistake of a funer-
al sermon preached over the wrong
person occurred in this city recent
ly. The good, kind and we'll -inten-
toned reverend doctor made the
distressing error of speaking the
last words over the wife and moth
erof the family instead of the hus-
band and father, whose corpse lay
in the casket few feet from him,
while the agonized widow to whose
virtues he was directing the dis
course was compelled to sit in ter
rible suspense and listen to her own
funeral sermon. What must have
intensified her distress and added to
the grim complication of the situa-
tion is the fact that the lady is a
member of the eminent divine's
church. The preacher painted the
desolation of home without moth
er, and extolled the lady's virtues
in manner that, under less pain
ful circumstances, must have been
some satisfaction.
A well known friend of the fami-
ly finally summoned up enough
courage to arise and explain in
broken and indistinct accents that
the minister should confine his re-
marks to Mr.. and not Mrs. Blank.
The minister who was in the midst
of his discourse, misunderstood the
Interpolation, and therefore con.
tinued all the more intensely his
panegyric. 1t was no use trying to
stop him now, but after the perora-
tion he looked into the coffin and
fell back. He had discovered his
mistake.-Los Angeles Express.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
Micker,s Belief.

In the Pittsburg Newsboys' Sun
day school one of the teachers, Miss
Mex, bad class of "new boys"
who had only attended the school
for short time. She had told the
boys whatever they asked in the
name of the Lord they should re-
ceive. Later on in the afternoon
she observed one of the boys named
Bill chewing tobacco, which, of
course, was against the rules. After
reproving him for his fault she ask
ed him: "BilI, where did you get
that tobacco?"
"Mickey gave it to me, nam, he
answered.
Miss Mo turned to Mickey
and asked him if he did not know
it was wrong to give Bill tobacco
after she had forbidden its use.
"Why, Miss McK-," Mickey
replied, "don't you believe in the
Bible?"
"Certainly 1 do" she replied.
"Well, then, whimpered Mickey,
lyon told US if we asked thing in
the Lords name we would get it,
and Bill said to me for Gods sake
to give him a chew"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
Born Dumb.

My little Lowell my speechless child
Can forget my woman's heart and be
Forever mute to grief, forever mild?
Is 1t not hard to bear the falling rod
When such an ailment for these baby lips
Divinely suits the policy of God2
The lambs that play too long at hide and
seek
Have tongues that ask for mothers; these, 1
Learn lovely meanings when the children
speak.
The mother comes from far across the field
And calls assurance to her anxious child,
AS had answered had my lamb appealed
sowith unfeathered blackcaps; sowfth things
Whose tones are pitched too low for mortal
ears.
They plead. and nature sends them breast
and wings.
But shall never hear that storied speech,
That lovely language whose expression is
Defiance OF all rules that man may teaeh:
Ncr hear against my heart sons content
When for his mouth tho willing milk is Eind.
And for his lips my fountain is well spent.
1 have brought silence to my husbands knee
And he (oh, baby, baby, try to speakD
SO greatly counted on the mimicry
OF words his wit prepared to plague thy lips,
Ready to kiss that rosebud impotence,
Thy mouth. and garner all thy precious slips.
-Mother,'' he used to say, ''when am worn
In days to come with writing, you shall bring
This bud of April on your shoulder borne,
'And he shall chatter to my chain. or tear
My latest lyric, or shall cry to touch
The raining splendors of your rayished hair,
Until he dwindle and his eyes grow dim,
And we can worship him before the fire.
And kiss each other many thanks for him.
"we will undress him in your cradling lap,
And spy upon his beauty, praying God
To bless his life with fruit of tender hap;
''Then will have him to my heart awhilen
(oh. baby, baby, baby, try to speakD
And watch the fading of his sleepy smile
IT'LL dimples cannot follow kisses pressed
Upon the pointing slumber of his mouth,
And restore his beauty to thy breast.'
Oh, husband, husband. and the child is dumb
The lamb outspeaks him, and the day-old
thrush
How shall | break this news when that you
conner
Ny travail was for silence, and my dove
Can only watch his mothers moving lips,
And never give her back word of Lowell
Father of his upon the ocean, comel
Thy wife desires thy head upon her breast
The child of our enchantment is born dumb
Norman Gale.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
GEMS in VERSE.
Here's to Heri

Here's to Heri
My theme Is one that's been too long I'M
sing the woman who can hold her tongue
AT evening circle, picnic or high tea;
In fact, wherever she may chance to be.
And listen to the gossip of the town
How Mrs. A has turned her cashmere gown,
And Mr.. b has cut young DIR. G
For telling tales of fiirty Widow d,
And Lawyer E is smitten with Miss F,
And Deacon G is fast becoming deaf,
And, oh, much more-as if she never heard
OF all the ceaseless chat single word
And who, not only at such times as these
mean lawn parties, sewing bees and teas
But at all seasons, when it's for the best.
Can keep her thoughts close prisoned in her
breast,
And though spark may glitter in her eye.
To speech unworthy it ne'er gives reply.
Alssi alRsi let no one look at me,
For with regret own am not she.
Were /, / really shouldn't think it wrong,
For once, to celebrate myself in song.
But she must be somewhere, SO had sung
The wondrous woman who can hold heE
Detroit Free Press.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21


Some time ago, a saw-milI man,
living near Albany, related the fol-
lowing:
a man was caught in the rain
and crawled into a hollow log to
keep dry. The rain swelled the log
SO that he found himself unable to
get out. Thinking that he must
die, and giving up all hope of being
released, he began to think of his
chances for Heaven. He thought
of all the mean things he had ever
done and tried to decide which was
the meanest. At last he suddenly
remembered that he had voted the
Republican ticket once, and he felt
SO little, he slipped ont of the log,
and went on his way.-Pomeroy
Democrat.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
Variety Necessary.

The man who thinks newspa-
per should be made up exclusively
of reading matter suited to his par
ticular whims and prejudices is
pretty hard to please. He forgets
that there are other interested in
subjects in which he deems obnox-
ious. All kinds of people read
newspapers, and there must be
variety in the kinds of news pub
lished..
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Dull times are not without some
good results. There is a general
religious awaking all over the land.
The people not having employment
for their hands, have the opportu-
nifty and time 10 employ their
minds. Those who are kept busy
with work or business have no
time to give to religion.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
Some Copy Might Affect Him Thus.

"Drunk again, she sarcasticaIIy
remarked, as he stumbled into the
room.
whats gone wrong now?"
aNussin, M DEAR" stammered
the editor, "I jus dizzy-head
swim f'm reain' m c'rectin' s'much
copy"
"WeH," she muttered, as he care
fully placed his boots on the bed
and threw himself under it, 'Tve
often heard that reading makes a
full man, but 1 never saw it verifi-
ed before. atlanta Constitution.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Ask some business men for an ad-
vertisement or some locals and
they will say they don't believe in
advertising, as a paper is never
read. But let that man be caught
kissing his neighbor's wife and his
tune changes instantly, and if the
printing Office is in the garret of a
seventeen story building he will
climb to the top and beg the editor
to keep quiet and not publish his
misdoings in the paper where
everybody will read them.-Er
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

The Kiowa Journal says: "You
will never find busy man med
ding with other peoples business,
nor one who is well versed in science.
a we'll stored mind has not the
room for gabbling, nor has the mind
of business man space for the seed
of tale-bearing. Education and bus
mess prepare, occupy and will lift
up humanity above such low and
base depravity. 1t is the idler that
becomes the gossip peddler. His
brain is the veritable workshop of
the devil. Backbiting, slandering
and gossiping are not members of
an intelligent and busy mind. Take
the street corner loafer and the
tough. the course and vulgar, and
you will find where they dwell, dis
cussion, division and trouble. There
is a peculiar characteristic of gossip
pers, they never attack the charact-
ers of their equals, possibly because
they have none; but like the night
fly attacks the candle, SO thcy make
their thrust at some one who stands
prominently above them, and who
shines resplendantly brighter than
they
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
FaiIed o Gire Proper Marnlng.

A good story is told by one of the
parties interested offs Brooks county
judge, who presided at an action for
damages against the Savannah, Flor
ida and Western Railroad for the
killing ofa COW, not many years
ago. In such cases the testimony
of the engineer aud fireman is al
ways allowed in behalf of the de-
fendant, except in certain cases. 1t
seems that in this instance the COW
walked across the track and behind
shed, which stood very near by,
and then emerging from behind the
shed tried to cross again when she
was killed by the train. "What
did you do when yon saw the COW
on the track9" asked the plaintiffs
attorney of the engineer, who was
on the witness-stand. When I first
saw her on the track, was the re-
ply,sI blew my whistle. What else
did you dor put in the attorney.
"When I saw her cross the track
again l put on my air brakes and
blew the whistle again"
"Anything else?"
"No, that was all could do, under
the circumstances.
"Why didn't you holler2" asked
the judge.
The railroad won its case with
the jury.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

The railroads will continue to
carry as much coal after it goes on
the free list as they now carry. The
only difference will be that they
will then carry that which is to be
consumed by our people, at the
same price they now carry that
which is shipped abroad.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Jas. A Gibson, postmaster at
Romney, and prominent and in
fiuential democrat of that section,
died at his home in that place on
Friday morning.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Schuyler DoneIla, of Huntington,
has been appointed to good po-
sition on the government detective
force. He has served in that ca
pacity before and it is said he un-
derstahds the business.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
a Song of the World.

A Song OF the World.
"World amt what it useter be-" you'll hear a
feller say,
AS he crosses of his legs and heayes n sigh.
But it happens she's the best world that she's
ever been today,
Anshe's whirlin like two-forty round the sky.
The stores give bigger measure;
The mines sight o. treasure;
There's more o. love an pleasure
In the land.
The skies are mostly sunny;
You jingle more o. money,
An the brown bees bring their honey
To your hnndl
"world amt what it useter be-" OF course it
amt. because
It's cuttin out n newer kind o. way.
1t amt got time to worry bout the kind o
world it was,
For it keeps a-gittin happy on the wayi
Brighter blossoms tyvinin;
Brighter suns a-shinin;
What's the use in pinin
An whinin through the land7
Skies are mostly sunny;
You jingle more o. money,
An the brown bees bring their honey
To your handi
Atlanta Constitution.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Squire F. NJ. Fowler of Glover's
Gap was struck by a freight train
and instantly killed while walking
from Burton to his home one night
last week.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Mrs. Sarah Holden, of Harrison
county, died last week after a life
of priyation. Thursday a box nail
ed against the wall was found to
contain $500 in gold, sewed into an
old skirt which she wore were $500
in bills. The skirt was patched in
many places and under each patch
was one or more notes
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

A Wayne county farmer, who
saved boy from drowning and
Afterwards gave him a drink of
whisky for fear that the ducking
would make him sick, was fined
$40 for giving LIQUOR to a minor.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Col. Romeo Freer of Ritchie, Jim
Hughes of Cabell, and Warren Mil
Ter of jackson are mentioned for
Congress by the Republicans of this
District.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

The matter of issuing bonds to
the amount of $4,000 to aid in
building railroad through Upsher
county, will be voted on by the
people of that county.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Major NJ. NJ. Clothier, of What
com, Or, has a hickory cane cut at
Plymouth Rock, Massachusetts,, in
1921, by Nathaniel Pierce, who
came over in the Mayaower. The
cane has been passed down to the
eldest son or daughter for many
generations, and camc 20 Major
ClOthier from his grandmother,
Sarah Mason. who made the 200
pound cheese which was given to
President Jefferson.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Mrs. Calhoun: John, what is
meant by biennial sessions of the
legislature?' John: @That it changes
politics every two years. How ig-
norant yon are"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
Cry.

n cry
Lo. am weary of ALI
OF men, and their love, and their hate
Ihave been long enough life's thraIl,
And the toy of a tyrant fate.
Iwould have nothing but rest,
IwOuld not struggle again;
Take me now to thy breast,
Earth, sweet mother OF men.
Hide me, and let me sleep;
Give me n lonely tomb,
So close, and so dark, and so deep,
shall hear no trumpet of doom.
There let me lie forgot,
When the dead at its blast are gone:
Give me TO hear it not,
But only TO slumber on.
This is the fate crave,
For lool- % the end and see,
If there be not rest in the grave,
There will never be rest for me.
III. F. Clarke.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Abe Webster, a unique old char
acter of Meigs county, Ohio, died
at his home near Old Town last
week at the age of IS years.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Huntington is said to be in bad
shape, and failures are almost a
daily occurrence down there. Steer
clear of boom towns.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

William Bailey of Rocky Fork
Kanawha county, aged 90, died on
Friday. He had been an inveterate
smoker since he was 10 years old.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

The school board at NeIsonyiIle.
O., has adopted an order that any
teacher who attends a dance shall
be discharged.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Proud wife: "How would You
feel, my dear, if you were brought
up before the bar of the house9''
Absent minded congressman: Dry
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Milton 81. Smith, President of the
Louisville and Nashville Railroad,
was at one time a watchman at a
a railroad crossing.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Kenos Douglass, who shot and
killed Thomas Reid at Trout VAL
ley this county, last Christmas
night, was safely landed in Jail here
last Sunday morning says the
Greenbrier Independent. Henry NJ.
Dawson, of Little Creek, locally
known as aThe Tall Sycamore of
the Greenbrier," is the man who
bearded Douglass in his den and
brought him in to answer for his
crime. He found Kenos camping
in the businesses of the Greenbrier
mountains and caught him una
ware. lie will get the s50Oreward.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

David sinton is the richest man
in Cincinnati. His wealth is esti-
mated at from $4,000, 600 to s12..
100000.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

A. R. Sutton, a Chicago engineer
working on plan to connect the
great lakes with the Atlantic as a
private enterprise. He proposes to
deepen the Welland cannal and
connect it with Lake Ontario by a
cut to the Niagara near Thorold,
Ont, then deepen the st. Lawrence,
cut canal south to Lake Chaplain,
and from its southern point, With
erhall, dig a canal to the Hudson
river at Troy or Albany.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

Preacher-"Youn men should
neyergo to a place whore they would.
not take their sisters Is there q
young man in the audience who
thinks he may safely break this
wise rnle2 Young man under the
gallery stands up, Preacher
And what is the place, my young
friend, which you think yourself
justified in visiting. and yet which
you would not think of taking your
sister, Young Man@@The barber
shop, sir.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21
AIT least fifteen blocks of valuable

AT least fifteen blocks of valuable
building property in Galveston, with
the twenty buildings thereon, the
whole being valued at fully one hun
dred thousand dollars, have tumbled
into the sea within few months
past 1t seems that the extension
of the south Jetty far into the Gulf
of Mexico by United States engi-
neers has detected the coast cur
rents until the waters have eaten
their way into the town to the ex-
tent, in some places, of two hundred
feet. The only remedy lies in the
construction of a sea.wall a milo
long to connect with the jetty.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1894-02-21

My little Lowell my speechless child
Can forget my woman's heart and be
Forever mute to grief, forever mild2
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-12-29
A LETTER PoR TONGUE.
Washington County Republicans Are
Solid for Him.
GAsroN, On, Dse. 2O.

CASTOR, Or, Dee. 20.
ED. JOURNAL; / have read With a
great deal Of interest your Teesnt edi'
torial on the crisis Ia the Republican
party IN this state land Ia the nation
too for that matter and think you
strike the nail sqparely on the head.
Machine politics aud machine pOlili-
clans must 90 or the Republican party
goes. There II no middle course, Tfus
or not, Mr Dolph 10 supposed 10 repre-,
sent the mach mes and corporations, ANA
90 far as his "a asut actions are con,
esTned tbs belief seems 10 be well
founded Without much eEedlon on
biz part Mr, D0lph has several times
received lhe higAest hon0rs lhis ~ 40
could bestow Esal "a Va bis sasy ohair
be hes reoelysd the beOeill tLat hsye
accrued from tho efforts Of men ike
Tongue, ful'on and deer lhey have
done the work and Nc D0lph hss
reapfd the lfullS ~ iheiF lab0ls al
Ma Dglph hss over dlsplayed' apy
marked ability that eplliles him 10 .
lliv lsase op ihe sepai0lshipl his fflfndf
DO not naue A. of eopne, no NJ
Washington county Rre iof lapgue %
= man, AtA mfeilpg ~ opf f0upg
Aen's Republican olub lhs olhsr DAY
va took ilslpR vote on sQme leaolu
ilopE endorsing ionRpe And ppely man |
~ ihe house pr0ss "a lls issl MI
iopRus hps n0lkfl hald apd fsiih
iully lss plfsldepi NJ lhe laups Aep's
hppuhllesp plpl snd Rlao N CAS- nsld
lof lhf hspuhilesp pAlly ~ bee l0pg
bsen y isfWils Nlll lhf yeppg hgpub
llpsns NJ lhe state sHi ! mskf lhf 81
aelllQn ihal nQ nHn $40 mnlf ~ kill
ipppllsm lbsn dia lhNa n ipugug
30 msl lhpll hf'i n akels NJ lplRl ~
bats hs lsi ihpN hnpN lhsi hp plula
slYf ihp lfas0up fol 100 hpllff siihiu
llnll Rnq ! haff hfalg many " ihfW
lomWfna hlm h4 sppfanpH sifN
'alhfls N hlEh pnilllepr dslil pp
'hpw lhfll hisasN 80 Hslfa hh
glfHp pp ihT mNnfy quisllun plslnlg
N hls iANpHlHp HlHfphesl lhe NOlfgpn
spN ~ lhs papiiafY nNi lihslRnalnE
lna hp hsp nm rhsnsfl lhfH msisl
allg slnoe Nhplflel hls lslf ~ ihf
lanas M lhf lfalplslHn lNu esHne
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,lphil ilg llllllapl aHa ~ ssHn 49,
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lllsal vsslhsl eeallpp,s u
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-12-29
Only One Cent Daily NewspaD,
on the Pacific Coast,
CHEAPEST NEWSPAPER IN ORDII
CHEAPEST AND BEST

The JOURNALS only ambition in the future, as IN a..
is to give the people the Cheapest and Best Dav
newspaper IN Oregon We have demo stratcd that W.
give the people good Daily Associated Press new
$500 year. cash in advances No papers sent bat wE,
paid for. ' WI" y
Remen be these Associated Press newspapor. j.
all the current of the world from dav t. dav AVN n ~
type and attractive style ~s
These low hard times lat enable every farm.r 70
his daily paper andkn the state of the market and ,
news of the world =" y
Capital journal. (Salem, Or.) 1893-1895, 1894-12-29
THE WEEKLY JOURNAL

%ill be improved in many respects and will be reduced
prce TO si.oo year. STRICTLY CASH IN ADVANCE o ppu
Scnl alter lime paid tor9 and after January l. 1895
will bc the cheape weekly in the state as the DAILY
chcnpesL DAILY During the past two years of bard tue
circulation OF tn the DAILY and WEEKLY JOURNAL has en-
stany increased, and the combined circulation of TIE 1
NAL IN Weten Oregon is larger than of any other news
IN the State. We are now able to place both WEEKLY anil
DAILY editions paying basis