Morning journal and courier., 1894-01-12
wanted-A Minister,

wanted-A Minister. Printed Anonymously Twenty Years Ago.l We have been without . pastor
 Some eighteen months or more; And though candidates arc psenty- Ms,.e nad q least . score All ct them stip-top" preachers,
 Or % their letters ran- We're just e far e ever
 From settling on man. The fr,t who came among us
 By no means was the worst But then we didn't think of him,
 Because be was the first; It being quite the custom
 To sacrifice e few, Before the church in earnest
 Determines what to do. There was . snsrt young fellow
 With ecrsous, earnest way, Who, but for one blunder,
 Had surely woa the day: Who Left so rood impreasion,
 On Monday one or two Went round among the people
 To see If he would do. The p.ous. goily portion
 Had not a fault to find; His clear aud searching preaching They thought the very hind; And all went smooth and pleasant unfn they heard the views Of some influential sinners
 Who rent the highest pewa On these his punSent dealing
 Made but sorry hit; The cost of Gospel teaching
 Was quite too light a fit Of course his fate was settled Attend ye persons all And preach to please the sinrers If you would act a call And next thsre came dandy; He wore his hair too loss, AnotherNs coat vas shabby,
 His voice not over strong; And one New Haven student
 Was more than all of those We couldn't heed the sermon For thinking of his nose. Then wsarying of candidates, We looked the country through. Mid doctors and professors,
 To find one that would do: And Rgter much discussion
 On who should bear the ark Win toleranle agreement
 We fixed on Ds. Park. Here. then. we thought it settled, But were amazed 10 find Oar hattering invitation
 Respectfully declined. We turned to Dr. Hopkins
 To help us in the lurch, Who strangely thought that college Had claims above our church. Next we dispatched committees By twos and threcs, to urge The lAbors for 6 Sabbath
 Of the Rev. Shallow Solurge. He came-a marked sensation, So wonderful his style, Followed the creskiug of his boots AS he passed up the aisle. Ills tones were so affecting,
 His gestures so divine, A lady faisted in the hymn
 Before the second line; Ana on that day he gave us, In accents clear and loud, The greAtest prayer ever addressed To an enlightened crowd He preached 6 double sermon, And gave us angela food On such a lovely topic,
 "The joys of solitude" An full of sweet descriptions, Of flowers and peariy streams, Of warhling birds, and moonlit groves, And golden sunset beams Of faith and true repentance
 He nothing had to say; He rounded all the corners,
 He smoothed the rugged way; Managed with great adroitness To entertain and p1ease, And leave the sinners conscience Completely at its ease. Six hundred is the salary
 We gave in former days;- We thought 1t very liberal,
 And found it hard to raise. But when we took the paper,
 We had no need to urge, To raise a cool two thousand
 For the Rev. Shallow splurge. In vain were all our efforts.
 We had no chance st all, We found ten city churches
 Had given him 6 call, Aud he. in pray~rful waiting, Was keeping them in tow, But where they paid the highest It was whispered he would go. And now good Christian brothers, We ask your earnest prayers That God would send shepherd To guide our church affairs, With this clear understandinE man to meet our views Mrlst preach 10 please the slnnera, And i'll the vacant pcws.