The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-01-12
TOLD ON TIE QUIET.


The sport, the business man or any
body who has not grown tired and
weary of the Sullivan-B Mitchell rot will
please favor me with his address.
Now that Lottie Collins has gone.
and my remarks will probably not
clash with our local Critics I want
to say that, everything taken into
consideration, she is the most over
estimated woman on the stage in
America today. She had a good COM
pany, it is true, but as to herself
faugh!
You watch Powers. If he doesn't
tie up Varian in a bow-knot before
twenty days have passed, then. in the
language Of the lamented Bishop Pol
land, I've missed my calculation
So Hiram E. Booth aspires to be the
leader of the Republicans in the Coun-
Gil, does he? Well, 1 hope he may
succeed. He should do. He is my
beau-ideal of a Republican legislator!
Once upon midnight 6reary,
The doctor Slumbersd weak and weary,
And all the town could
Hear him Snore.
s While he lay there sweetly narping.
Like a ramgoat rapping
His hard head
Upon the door,
Get thee up" voice said loudly,
Come in haste it added proudly,
Like a man who owned million
Or much more.
But the doctor never needed.
Back to dreamland fast he speeded,
For such men as that he needed
In his practice
Nevermore.
For long months that man has owed him,
Not cent he'd ever paid him.
And the doctor now will dose him
NeVermOre.
Unknown Warbler
A 'night-gown drilr' is among the
latest fads, and according to the Ar
gonaut IAN astounding exhibition of
girlish charms" was recently seen at
Pottsville, Pa, opera house. A benev-
olent order gave a benefit entertain
ment the chief feature of which, ac-
cording to the official programme, was
a "nightgown drill This drill was
just what the name implied. The lights
in the room were slightly lowered. to
give the scene more realistic effect
The audience sat breathless for a min
ute or two, and then, from the wings
of the stage, emerged a vision of maid
en- lovliness. A pretty girl, of interest
ing years, walked slowly before the
footlights. Her only robe, as far as
the charmed spectators could see, was
white flowing gown of the simplest
make. The soft material chung nicely
TO the prettily rounded shoulders. Her
hair fell loose on her shoulders. Her
sncw-white feet and ankles twinllled
beneath the tilmy lace at the bottom
OF the gown. Hardly had the audience
recovered its breath before another
girl, dressed just as the first, appeared.
Then another, and another, until sew
enteen bewitching girls, with loose
flung hair and twinkling feet were up
on the stage. Each young lady car
ried a lighted candle. They marched
back and forth across the stage and
performed various evolutions They
refused to respond to an encore.
a hint to young bachelors who are
afraid of marrying" is found in the
following clipping: THE female Ute
is taught from infancy that she is in
ferior to the male and in consequence
makes the meekest, humblest and most
patient of wives. There are no bald
headed Utes.'
I ask ssked her for a kiss that night
Then reaching for the chandelier
She turned the gas down low.
Detroit Free Press.
Sarah Bernhard towns up" to be-
ing so years old. That means she is
So to day.
An eastern critic compares Rosina
Vokes and Maud Adams. Ye Gods.
lis well he's at a distance.
The disappointed story-writer who
competed" is abroad in the land, and
the greatest idiots" that ever lived
outside of the Republican party are
the men whose combined judgment
woman at the baby show is far from
being lin it,
The hero never asks, What win
people think of me if 1 do these
but, What will | think of
myself if / do not do them ?''-Ex. That
is why the crop of heroes IS always
short.
When may l sleep again" he cried,
As the baby began to squat
And a saucy echo answered back,
After the baWl."
It is not until man discovers how
much he doesn't know that lie begins
to learn anything.
have long been aware that there
was no lead in lead pencils, and now
4 writer in the ST Louis Globe-Demo-
rat skaters another idol by the state
nent that there is no rubber in India
rubber. The imperative necessity of
finding some to make up for the iney
table scarcity if not failure, of the
original article has long been recog-
lized, and it really seems as though
he difficulty had been solved at last.
The imitation consists of n1anita gum.
resin oil and one or two other ingre-
1ients bearing as little resemblance
% rubber. but forming, in combina
ion, a substance equal TO the best
rubber and much superior to the or
ginal article.
DIR. FELL.
MORO SALARY CAUcUsING.