The Dakota chief. (Gann Valley, Buffalo County, S.D.) 18??-1913, 1894-08-09
UREDOFBORROWING

There was a meeting Of the Grange.
The farmers came in n after an
other, and sOon the little schoolhOuse
was filed with an anxious, happy as
seMbly.
Jonathan Fuller, the chairman.
raped for order and called the roll.
Every man answered 10 his name,
with the exception Of Mr.. Haynes.
Mr.. Fuller announced. at the on.
clusion Of the preliminary bushes,
that there was no particular theme
for discussion and moved that John
Bangs make remarks upon any sub
ject he might choose. The whole
meeting seconded the motion with a
roar.
Mr.. Bangs arose and looked at the
cobwet in the corner Of the room as
if he thought the e was an inspira.
ton in its dusty drapery. He then
glanced at the floor and said he lie.
licIed he had nothing to say. The
crowd stamped and yelled, ana amid
the discord could be heard cries Of
$50 on" You must say some
thing ''Hurrah for Bangs" and 50
forth, all Of which quite took the
Old farmer by surprise, and before he
knew it he was standing AMI balanc-
ing himself against the desk. The
uproar ceased and Bangs cleared his
throat.
well, I'm not that sort O citizen
as wants to make hard feelin's 'mOng
each other, but when l sees a screw
loose / wants TO take a screw driver
and tighten it. The audience tit
tered and stamped. Bangs fixed his
eyes on the cObweb, then glanced at
the chairman. who acted as if lie had
been ; OF, and turned his eyes from
The speaker TO a crack in the ceiling.
Now 1t IS a good thing TO have d
Grange. 1t is a useful thing 10 have
it made strong: in fact, it is the best
screw-driyer We ever had. Loud
laughter. There has been a screw
loose for a long time in our neigh
bOrhood. Deep silence 1t is time
70 commence turnin' your screw
driver on it. You all know what a
bOthcration it is TO borrow, and W at
a sui disagrceabler thing il Is to
lend. Loud clapping and stamping.
A. said, l don't want any hard feel
ms, but if any Of you have been
bothered as much as l have, you'll
not blameIme for saying Caleb Haynes
is the worst nuisance We have.
He bOrrows everything. His wife is
getting into the same habit, and the
youngsters too. He is the screw that's
loose. Now let's talk up some way
t. cure Caleb, for we all know he IS
good at heart: besides that. ! want
TO get a screw-driver he borrowed Of
me not long ago, for my is
about TO take up the carpet"
This brief, eXtemporaneous address
was followed by wild cheering and
excited stamping till the whole room
was One cloud OF dust No one
minded ii but the spider, who scamp
cred over his swinging mansions del
lcate carpetings and settled himself
down III his tack chamber in perfect
disgust at the behavior Of the grang-
ers.
The plans suggested for curing
Caleb Haynes Of borrowing were
numerous, none Of which seemed en-
tirely satisfactory but the one set
forth by Mr., Bangs. 1t was unani-
mOuSly agreed 10 begin the tightening
of the screw the neat day, and that
the novel method should Ne started
by Mr.. Bangs.
The meeting then dissolved and the
grangers dispe sed to their homes.
Caleb HAYNES was feeding the pigs.
Looking toward the hill his eye
caught the wagon Of John Bangs,
loaded with something.
Good morning. Caleb" said John.
GOOD morning. John. Going to
MARKET"
''Oh, no.. l Just merely thought l
would bring you owe a few things.
You weren't at the Grange last
night"
NO, l couldn't come. Had TO so
to town last night with my old wo-
mans cousin Ann, TO borrow a tiut-
ing machine. l knew there was no
such thing around the neighborhood. F"
wish l had one. l would loan it
to you. But l guess there is some
thing here you will like. Now. here
is a new ak l will let you have till
you get ready to return it, and"
''Oh, you are too kind"
''And a coffee-grinder, and a first
rate grind stone. Yes, and here is a
double-shovel pillow, just what you
want for your new corn"
John, you are a Christian. II