The Penn's Grove record., 1894-05-25
THEODORE'S PROPOSAL.

Theodore Shy was an exceedingly
bashful man, and When, after much
debating In his mind, he decided to
take a wife, his thoughts at once
turned to a matrimonial paper as the
best means for attaining his object
Theodore Shy, at the timo Of COD
t%emplating this most serious step,
was thirty-six years Of age. PassablY
good-looking. good-tempered, good
natured, he possessed a good house,
a good income, and all ho required
was a good wife to make his home
happy
While matters were OF this stage,
Theodore was brought to a full sto1,
and for this reason he could not on
coct a suitable advertisement.
He was In this dilemma for two
days, when he determined to seek
the advice OF a lady friend-a young
widow, who bad ofton commiserated
him on his solitary lot
Mrs. Ready was an old friend
whom he had known before her mar
riago, and was the only person he
felt he could take into bis confidence,
boing assured Of he's sympathy and
dlscrcetnesa She was at this time
but twenty-five years of age and ex-
ceedingly pretty.
He saw the young widow In her
morning room and she met him with
extended hand and a smile Of well
come.
After talking of the weather OF
yesterday the prospects Of ditto for
to-day and tomorrow, Theodore
sought an Opening to tho object Of
his call
II wish to seek your advice on q
matter Of great import to myself"
"Yes."
'There 4, no one else of whom !
should care to ask this advice, and
feeling suro OF your sympathy and
help I determined to be guided by
your counsel, II you will be so good as
to give ith
The widow, much surprised and
impressed by his extreme seriousness,
expressed her inclination to laugh,
and said she would be pleased to help
him in any way in her power.
"Well, the fact is," be said, II am
contemplating marriage, and know
ing you-knowing you to be-"
Eyes" said the widow demurely.
"Knowlng you to be moro ex.
perienced 10 such matters, and being
so klnd-so good-so-n
Here the pretty widow blushed and
looked lovelicr than ever. eyes"
she said in a low tone, moving lit
tie nearer to him, 'and0
"And so dIsinterested" Here she
gave him an Vulnerable look Of re-
proach. II thought l could not do
better thap to ask your advice as to
the lady / wish to marry" "
Mrs. Ready looked puzzled. Wa
he not going to propose sitter ell?
''Who Is the lady?"
"Well ahl the fact is l don't know.
mo he went on hurriedlY. "You
see / expect there would be a great
deal OF chaff at such an old bachelor
as myself getting married, and l am
anxious to avoid tn
Theodore had by Some process OF
reasoning come to believe be was too
old TO dream Of marriage. Tho widow
thought otherwise and vcntured to
say So
swell, at any rate" he said, I'm,
friends think 50 and would fidicule
the idea, SO I've bcop thinking Of
using the columns Of o matrimonial
paper for tho purposap
Tho vvtdntS fobkcd Aphnat.
"What do you want me to do2A.
'The fact is he confessed, ~ can't
make out such at Advertisement as !
should like, and I want you to help
me to word n If SOU will be 70
kind"
Mrs. Ready was amazed, and not a
little disappointed.
Writing materials being on the
table, the widow sat down and took
o piece OF paper oil which to commit
notes.
"First Of all" said the lady, ''what
sort of a wife do you want9"
"Really," he said, II cannot do
scribe the sort of lady 1 should like.
You sec, It seems so foolish, es.
pecially for me-"
"Weil, then" replied his compan.
Inspiration. "Now, did you want O
young. middle-aged or old lady2"
'Ohl / think-youngish."
"But what do you call youngish?
You don't want a girl Of 1872"
colder than that 1 am double
that age, you know"
'Oh! are you? Well, then, about
what age shall I say?"
allow old are y / really beg
your pardon. 1 meant about your
age"
II don't mind You knowing my
age. So you think a lady OF my age
would suit your" said she merrilY.
Theodore was certain Of It.
"Now we have the frSt require.
mcnt Do you wish to state whether
:hc Is to be slim, or-or shall we say
'Lonug':"
Theodore looked again round the
room, and came to the conclusion
that the widow was Of tho proper
lions he desired.
alike you" he said. Having only
Just contemplated matrlmony, he had
never bestowed o thought on the
vidow's charms until now, aud fast
becoming hclplessly In love he wished
tie had gone and shot himself before
he came on his present Grand
But, you foolish man. how can !
put that? What am II"