Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1894-10-04

Why, Berth, you always abuse him
so much.
Bertha-Yes, but how could I know
that he would propose to me?-
Truth.
WELL WARRANTED.
Xavier Iynn-Is there any war;
rant for the statement that Kasherly
has skipped the country?
Editor-Yep; two. Sheriff's got
'em h. Buffalo Courier.
THE PEEKER.
He heard them kissing on the sly
And peeked in through the door,
And then he cried in accents high,
Say, sister, what's the scorer"
detroit Free Press.
NOT AT ALL WORRIED.
Amelia-Oh, Mr. Clasper, where is
your arm?
James-Oh, never mind my arm !;
I'll look for it when l want it.
PUCK.
DEEPLY wRoNGED.
Wild Westerner (fcrcely)-In your
last paper, sir, you said | had killed
twenty-seven men, sir!
Editor - Well, and wasn't that
statement correct?
Wild Westerner (still more fierce
ly mo, sir; twenty-eigbt, sir
twenty-eight.
HER EXPERIENCE WAS DIFFERENT.
Poor Eve" soliloquized the phi
losopher; 'she is blamed for all the
sins committed by her daughters.
II wish that were true, said his
wife.
us it not SOP" asked the sage
mo, indeed! When l do anything
nmiss you blame me. "-[New York
Press.
NOT THAT IMPRESSION.
"That is wonderful work Of ma
ture, said the man who was visiting
Niagara Falls for the first time.
Pretty big" replied the hotel
keeper.
II don't see how anybody could
contemplate it without feeling terri
bly, Insignificant"
"Well, 1 suppose a good many peo-
pie do feel that way. But you see,
most of the people who stop at this
house are brides and grooms. "-[De-
troit Free Press.
NOT HER FAULT.
"It's strange that all my friends
have become engaged and l am not, u
1T may be, my dear mademoi-
selle; but you have one consolation.
With all their becoming engaged you
have the satisfaction of knowing you
have shown yourself more willing to
get married than any of them
Album of Fashion.
THE BOOK REQUIRED.
Mr.. Bondstock (ten derly)-Do you
think you could learn to love me?
Miss Wurkum (shyly)-I might il
you gave me lessons from the right
book
Mr.. Bondstock-What book shall /
teach you from?
Miss Wurkum-Your pocketbook.
New York World.
OUT OF HIS LINE.
Ada-Flo was just going down for
the third time when DIR. Watson
diged off yacht and caught her.
Grace-And saved her life! Wasn't
that wonderful?
Ada-Yes, for doctor i Life.
PERMITTED TO REFER.
Cholly Chumpleigh-What do you
think? Some people asked me yes
terday if we were engaged.
Miss Coldeal-Indeed What did
you tell them?
Cholly Chumpleigh-I referred them
to you. Was that right?
Miss Coldeal-Quite right. / never
dismiss anybody without a refer
ence.
4 COUNTER IRRITANT.
''The man in the next room kept
mo awake all night snoring.
Landlady-Well it won't happen
again. I've put a woman with par
rot, a piano and baby on the other
side.-[ Chicago Inter Ocean.
UNDOUBTEDLY FOOLISH.
Eyes, she is very foolish some
times"
What evidence has she ever given
Of being foolish?"
''Well, | have known her to talk to
bride and try to interest her in a
topic that had relation neither to the
groom nor the ceremony.-[N Newly DIRK
Press.
HE DIDN'T TIP.
Haven't you forgotten some
thing, sir?' said the tip-expectant
waiter to Uncle Abner Meddergrass,
as the latter rose from the table.
Let me see" replied the honest
man, looking at his hand baggage.
There's my umbrella and my satch-
ell. No, they're all here, but I'm
obliged to you just the same for your
thoughtfulness. i Detroit Free Press.
AN DPERTINENCE.
THAT was beautiful compost
tion," she said dreamily.
yves" replied the young
man who doesn't know much
about music, lit was pretty fine"
81 wonder what key il is in?"
cts down on the programme as a
nocturne, isn't it?"
yes"
s.xVall thar oho,,I1 <L;cL "a