The Wilmington daily Republican. (Wilmington, Del.) 1890-1902, 1894-11-30
TAXING ms UNCLE AROUND.


man An . btCro.
There are some old men living who have
not seen all the sights of tho city. Now
and then ono comes in who is counter
part of Joshua Whitcomb. Such one
was here last week. He has lived nearly
40 years not far from Wisconsin town
which is within two hours ride of Chica-
go. He has nephew here who took him
around for two days and the nephew is
enjoying himself relating some of the an.
tics of hts Badger uncle.
I'VE took an elevator, said the nephew,
I'm one Of the retail dry goods houses,
anu while the man in charge was waiting
ior others to get In my uncle said to him:
hurry up now. II you're going to walt
for load, wen get out and walk Just
as the chr started no said to the man:
Don't lot go the rope. I reckon 1 could
jump out and beat 1t down, but I'd like
to enjoy the full ride II it's the Same to
you.' We reached tho third floor, and the
man called out Third floor. Ladies', cor
sets, underwear silk skirts, hosiery and
patterns. Stop 'er, called out my uncle,
and turning to me he said. Come ON.
Jim. This Is where I want to land, and
as we were leaving the car he said to the
man In charge: Jest hold your horses
here for a few minutes till We como buck,
Now, don't run away, cause want to go
down to the roof when / get on again
I'VE were soon in the midst Of the
young salesladies Of the department My
uncle, after looking about for moment
remarked In a perfectly honest way: I
guess you arc all orphans or widders may
be, seeing that you are all dressed In black.
guess the concern here is pretty good to
give you jobs. I'm awfully sorry for the
lot of you, and II you ever get away Sum
days and can come ont to - I'll meet
you and take you out to the farm and give
you the best we got My ole woman
would bo powerful glad to have you. Jim,
here, is my nephew; lives here in Chicago.
Reckon you all know JIM hey, Jimp'
THE situation was embarrassing, and
pulled him away. Tho young women
were blnshing and laughing, As we pass.
ed ont he saw one of those ugly Chinese
gods in the tea department.. Before I
could stop my uncle ho had hit the idol In
the face with his SLOUGH hat, kicked at 10
and then said to me: Say, Jim, II your
Aunt Betsy had that out to the farm.
she'd use 1t for a bee gum. 1 wonder
what they'll let IT go forS' tugged at his
elbow until l got him away. We were
then in sight of descending elevator
He broke from my clutch, and making a
uash Tor the car no called back to me:
Come on, Jim. I'll hold her till you get
aboard, and when I reached the car he
had hold like wise on the cable, while
tho conductor was crowded back In the
corner. Keep back, or I'll brain you,' my
uncle was saying to the conductor. Il
know what I'm doing. Say, Jim, grab
tho rope minute till spit on my hands,
and then I'll run her to the cellar.
XIV the tima he rplaoead ba ,nro hod
him In the corner, where held him until
We reached the first floor. got him out
Of the cor and finally got him to his train,
and while enjoyed his antics was tic.
killed. when knew he was gone, for didn't
know while he WINS here what minute he
would break AWAY and cause me trouble.
He is one of tho best old men that ever
lived, but liable to go off half cooked at
anything that is novel. '--Chicago Herald.