The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1894-01-03
PITH AND POINT. i. n Z. {

PITH AND P0IN
Next to nothing "A dnde's hat sss
A dead beat The funeral drum.
Woman's rights Marriage rites.
Be content with your lot and qait
trying to sell it. .Ss & as &Ssis
A man Of push is too often unjustIy
accused of having 8 pull.
'Tis now the small boy though his hesr M
still bold IA ga
Puts of fighting Indians until rs less cold
'la,. Washington star
The man who deals in both umbrels
las and parasols can read any: kind ct
weather report with satisfaction.
Hallo. 81 r 3 4 = "a
The iron founder may be q flarge-i
proportioned man, but he never yet,
in his business, succeeded in casting
a shadow.
ssDo you believe that contentment
is better than riches?' Perhaps Sol
if you have them both together.
Inter-Ocean. 800; 81:
A foreign chiropodist announced
that he has stremoyed corns from al
the crowned heads of Europe. =" Phil.
adelphia Record. q Il
Miss Daybye-sT shall never marry.
Miss Bloom Don't say that. Some.
one may leave -you q fortune some
day."-Brooklyn Life. ssass.
Customer Send barrel OF sugaE
up to my hoose and ehargeit Grocer
--"Excuse me; the sugar trust is
busted. Detroit Free Press. I. 81.
asked JAMS for fivs, -
And he wrinkled up his brow;
II don't lend less than ten, said he, 3 q 8:
"And haven't that much now"
Clara--ttHe says I sing more beam
tifully than any girl he knows. What
do you think of that ?''a Maud1
think he should extend his acquaiht-
ance." Truth.
Her Mother--.I am surprised sas
Charles squandering 50 much money
on phonograph. The Wife I am
not. He always did like to hear him.
self talk. Brooklyn Life. q
He wrote many poems on beautiful SNOW,
Still 1t seemed to starvation he'd stall
But now he makes money the whole winter
By cleaning ie snow Of the walk. 4
Chicago Inter-O Ocean.
CT am troubled with insomnia. e =
haven't closed my eyes for FIVE nights IS
.'You want to play football The first
game played I remember my eyes
were closed for fortnight. -Sta5ss.-
man. sF..f.., & IN
Chicago Police Justice- Your face
seems familiar. Don't I know your"
Greasy old bum-1I don't think you
do, your honor. I'm little pertick-
'ler about the comp'ny ] keep. - Chi
cago Tribune. - So
Matrimonial Advertisement A1ady,
young, pretty, bright and poor, de.
sires to make the acquaintance OF 9
man with the opposite qualities, with
view to happy marriage. -Fhe.
gende Blatter. ~
Although the blind mans dog is SELL
dom accorded any prominence IN ac-
counts of the worlds happiness there
is no denying the fact that he takes
part in good many leading events:
Buffalo Conrier, - sgSeS
Johnnie -'Papa, do two negatives
make an affirmative? ?" Papa--'sThat'a
the rule" Johnnie-"WeH, you said
no, no, when / asked you for a quarter
this morning. When do I get it t?'--
Detroit Free Press. s..
ssMade an awful mistake at the Got
rox's reception. Stepped up to one
of the guests and told him to call me
a horse and carriage" ''Did he do
it?" mo. He called me an ass. -
Indianapolis Journal.
"What a clever, ingenious fellow
Bergensellers isl" GLOW so?"
never saw or heard of his doing any.
thing" That's it, exactly. Manages
to live without having to do any
thing. Chicago Tribune.
Aspiring Poet -"I'Il set the world
ablaze yet.' His Wife--'I do hope
you will, dear. Would you mind
making fire in the kitchen stove
just as q matter of practice, you
w?"--1ndianapolis Journal.
There's no surcease of sorrow at all,
There's the same tale Of woe to toll;
Though Mary has kindly dropped "Alterrhs
Ball."
She now MARBLES Daisy Bell" -,
indianapolis Journal.
-"Colonel Gore says he means to
shoot you like dog when he meets
you" "Oh, that's all right. The
colonel used to be on the police force
and couldn shoot dog if he had il
locked in a barn. - Indianapolis
Journal.
'sSir, have you any fault to find
with this sausage?" eyes, the ends
are not quite to my liking" why,
every sausage has got two endsl"
"True enough; but this one has, got
them too near together. "--Hlrschben
ger Tageblatt {,
First Artistic received a magnlfi-
cent tribute to my skill the other day
at the exhibition" Second Artist
"What was it9' First Artist You
know my picture, "A Storm at Ses?'
Well, a man and his wife were looking
at it and ! heard the man say: Come
on, my dear; that picture makes ME