The Londonderry sifter. (South Londonderry, Vt.) 1883-19??, 1894-10-26

by Robert j. Burdette was "Tbt
Brakeman at Church." 1t had an ex.
tensive reading some fifteen wears
ago. Believing that it would be again
enjoyed by many readers the S1rrEr
Ireproduces it:
To me comes the brakeman, an6
seating himself on the arm of the
seat, says:-
81 went to church yesterday"
"Yes?" l said, with that interested
infection that asks for more. "An6
what church did you attend?"
"Which do you guess?" he asked
"Some union mission church? ]
hazarded.
"Naw," he said, 81 don't like te
run on these branch roads very much
| don't often go to church, and when
/ do / want to run on the main line
where your run is regular and you &C
on schedule time and don't have tc
wait on connections. | don't like tC
run on branch. Good enough, but
/ don't like it."
episcopal ?"
"Limited express" he said cal
palace cars and So extra for seat
fast time and only stop at big sta.
tons. Nice line, but too exhaustive
for brakeman. All trainmen in un.
flform, conductors punch and lantern
silver-plated, and no train boys al
lowed. Then the passengers are al
lowed to talk back at the conductor
and it makes them too free and easy
No, couldn't stand the palace cars.
Rich road, though. Don't often hear
of receiver being appointed for that
line. Some mighty nice people travel
on it, too"
"Universalist," I suggested.
"Broad gauge" said the brake.
man; "does too much complimentary
business. Everybody travels on @
pass. Conductor doesn't get a fare
once in so miles. Stops at all flag
stations and won't run into ANYTHING
but union depot. No smoking ca,
on the train. Train orders are vague,
though, and the trainmen don't gel
along well with the passengers. No
don't 60 to the Universalist, though
know some awfully good men who
run on that road"
"Presbvterian ?" I asked.
"Narrow-gauge, eh?' said the
brakeman.
'Pretty track, straight as a rule
tunnel right through mountain
rather than 60 round it; splrit-leve
grade; passengers have to show theil
tickets before they get on the train
Mighty strict road, but the cars are 8
little narrow have to sit one in a seat
and no room in the aisle to dance
Then there's no stop-over tickets al.
lowed; got to GO straight through tc
the station you're ticketed for, or yor
can't get on at all. When the cars
full no extra coaches; cars built al
the shops to hold just so many anc
nobody else allowed on. But vol
don't often hear of an accident or
that road. It's run up to the rules.
"Maybe you joined the Free
Thinkers?" l said.
"Scrub road," said the brakeman
"dirt road-bed and no ballast; M
time card and no train dispatcher
All trains run wild and every enei
neer makes his own time, Just as b.
pleases. Smoke if you want to; kint
OF go-as-you-please road. Too man
side tracks, and every switch wild
| open all the time, with the switchma,
sound asleep and the target lam
dead-out. Get on as you please an
get off when you want to. Don't hav
to show your tickets, and the con
ductor isn't expected to do anythin
but amuse the passengers. No, sill
l was offered a pass, but don't Xix
the line. don't like to travel on
line that has no terminus. Do 70
know, sir, / asked division superir
tendent where that road run to, an
he said he hoped to die if he knew.
asked conductor whom he got hi
orders from and he said be didn't tai,
, orders from any living man or dea
; ghost. And when / asked the eng
neer whom be got his orders from, Ii
said he'd like to see anybody Civ
him orders, he'd run that train to su
himself or he'd run it into the diicl
Now you see, sir, / am railrua
man, and l don't care to run on
road that has no superintendent.
may be all right, but I've rallroade