Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-10-25

MISTER EDDYrUR:
: THAR wuz muzik in the air da last
weak, koodn't kwite tel wetlur it WIZ
intendid fur the publik GERS, or wethur
tina WIZ jest praktisin', butt sum wa,
aphtur ketcht the fust few kords wuz
enable tcw tarc misclph ava. 1t wuz not
so mulch the klassikul natur Nv the muzik
nor the phine playin' that dru me tew the
spot, butt wen see emmy onplezuntness
happenin', alwais like tew be on hand
tew see phair pla, and sumtimes git a
sect amung the witnesiz at the triul, and
a lew dimes fur testifyin'. So dru neer.
THAR wuz tew Italyuns a maxim
muzik. NV 'em had a orgun witch
turned with a krank, and the uthur had a
orgunette, witch went b wind. l hurd
'em disputin' about witch wuz the or
gun an witch wuz the orgunette, butt
kuodn't tel witch wuz rite bkaws tina
tawkt Italyun. AT last tina lepht it with
Il sittyzun hoo stood bi an he sed that NV
koarsc the muzik box witch had the
munkey with it wuz the orgun.
then TUX notiss fur the fust time, that
six lookin munkey wuz kaperin' round
ez ii he wantid tew attrakt sum atten-
shun. He klum up the orgun grinders
cloze, an hid in hiz ovurkote pokkit, then
pokt out hiz he'd an lookt awl round fur
sympathy, bi witch l knu he wuz mott
afcelin' we'll.
aXt the Italyun wot it wuz that aled
the munky an he scd, "Ifim Getty tew
mukkala sage leevs, him chavez up ALA
poppylista tawk in papella HERRULDA."
told him not tew pheel sad about it, fur
the munkey wood pheel bettur wen he got
ovur hiz sikness. | advizd him tew Civ
him a small dost NV gin with Il phew sage
leevs MKT with it, cz mi theory wuz that
like kures like, an he sed, "Too mukkala
wske now, too mnkkala gin, too muekala
beer. Munkcy, him no STAN it, makce
sage leevs ALA turn sour on stummik."
The nekst thing notlsst, tina begun to
pla a tune. But the muzik boxes klasht,
tina maid discord. Then the Italyuns got
mad, tina kalled cetch othur liurs, tina sed
sum kuss wurds CESS, hi the wa tina
lookt tew cctch uthur, and don't kno
wot the end wud hev ben if the nanajur
NV the hull bizness he'd not jest then kun
round an parted 'em. Me told 'em tina
ort tcw silk togethur like bruthers till
aphtur the elekshun, bkaws it wud hurt
the kumpany that was ahirin 'em few
pla. He scd if tina wood pla togethur til
aphtur tina got the dimmykrats, poppy
lusts, prohibishunists an spottid aig men
awl fixt, then tina kood turn in an settul
the orgun matter, if it TUX laig. Tha
seen the pint Nv this argymunt, an rusht
tew eetCh uthurs arms, with teers an
kisses that surprized me. Iwuz ovurkum
with the suddenniss NV the sessashun NV
hostllytees an wuz jest takin' out mi pen
sill few maik a note NV the surkumstance,
wen l see the big Italyun shake hiz phist
at the lttul Italyun ez he scd: "Non-
mi-scoarder! Limo del di che more,
cor lon,ananza!' | may hev got sum
wurds rong, butt if kno cnnything about
it he ment tew sa, "Don't We furgt it,wen
the lekshun's ovur III nok the stuffin'
out Nv yer littul orgunette." With this
site onplezuntniss oEur, tina kommenst
tew grind out the saim old tunes, Nv
'em keepin' jest about thre notes behind
the uthur bkaws he didn't kno the tune
only ez he ketcht it frum the uthur. Wen
l KUN ava, the sirkiss WIZ perseedn'
ez yooshual, and tina ware playin', "Too
littul boys in blew" The munkey wuz
lookin' littul bettur. lie wuz abel tew
Get peanuts, and pheel in the pokkits NV
the bistanders fur nkkuls.
Our partee IL gittin along awl rite.
THAR air moar poppylusts now than evur
before. The reezun liz we kno how tew
rekkun fggers. Wi, Mistur Eddytur,
tina soar up intew milyuns, and bilyuns,
tina kno jest how mulch wheel, an korn,
an turnips, an wool hez ben with in
every staff NV the ycwnyun fur thrice
yeers past. Evury speekur IL wawkin'
rithmytik, hull senses buio, almanik,
tide tabul, a multum in parvcnu. Eff we
don't git THAR, it vii be Bkaws we lett
intcw the partee too menny mugwumps.
j. Billings Sage.
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