davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
brushes at Fashionable tables.

AT a highly elaborated wedding in town
the guests were said 10 have developed the
most astonishing appotites, and regular
mob Of men took possession of the costly
viands, thereby excluding the women
from the supper room and preventing the
walters from serving any person in the
rooms beyond. The manners Of the crowd
were severely criticised by spectators at
the time, and loud were the comments of
those who tried in vain to get even plate
of ice cream for the ladies in their charge.
1t was said such lapse Of breeding could
not happen elsewhere, but what will these
sufferers say when they learn that similar
rush, classcd by them as 'hoggish, - oc-
CURED at buckingham palace at recent
state BALL
Good heavens! Right under royalty ;
nose the highest aristocracy fought like
SO many cubs for the boxes Of bonb0n5
which adorned the supper table and, if
report says true, displayed temper when
deprived of the sweets they thought to
carry home. If such scenes as would dis
grace a cake walk take place in the haut
monde, with half score Of royalists look.
ing on, Boston need not feel very sore
about its own bad manners. People be.
come very hungry at state balls and olab-
crate weddings and that's all there is
about it, n hungry man will do anything
TO appease his hunger, whether il is ia u
palace or n hotel.-Boston Herald
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

Democratic leaders seem to vie
with each other in abusing the very
tariff bill their party passed, but the
consistent ones are those who did
not vote for it. Says Democratic
Congressman Tarsney, brother of
our own Tim Tarsney:
SIN my judgment it does not re-
duce the burdens Of the people, al
though there is . reduction of the
rates generally throughout the
schedules. The tax on articles
taken from the free list more than
over balances the reductions on the
other schedules. Should there be any
reduction in the burdens of the peo-
pie such reduction would not com.
pensate for the injury to the public
and private morals of the people
that must result from the conviction
now general, that the bill is not the
product Of the deliberate, patriotic
judgment Of their legislators, but is
the result of influences that ought TO
have no potency in the making Of
peoples laws"
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
GrentlY Shocked.

The lodges resorted TO by travelling
fakirs are many and ingenious. One Of
the clevercst is recorded Icy a London pa.
per and challenges admiration for its in
gonuty, though the we'll known aversion
of elephants to mice might perhaps be
taken rs explaining the mystery of the
animal behavior
The proprietor Of a travelling circus an
nounccd that on a certain night trained
elephant would play the Russian Hymn
on a piano with its trunk. When the even
ing came, the circus was crowded TO the
roof with an eXpectant public.
After some Of the usual performances
had been gone through, four men brought
IN an upright piano, which they placed in
the center of the arena. Then the elephant
was led in lie walked slowly three times
around the ring, and then, amid the keen
est excitement, advanced To the piano.
With a slight movement Of his trunk
he opened the keyboard, but scarcely had
he done so when a sudden change came
over his appearance. His eyes dilated with
fear and rage, he lifted his trunk in the
air, and then, with a scream of terror,
he rushed out of the arena.
The proprietor Of the circus and the ele-
phant's keeper held a short and hurried
consultation, and then they, too left the
ring.
After a few moments the circus propri-
etor entered again and announced with
regret that the performance could not
take place. The fact was, he said, that
the elephant had recognized in the key
board of the instrument n portion of the
tusks Of his long lost mother, who had
fallen prey to the ivory hunters Of Afri-
ca.-Youth' S Companion.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
FANClES OF lNVALlDS.
Gentleman Who Lonsod Tor Dish of
Drilled Elephnnt's Moot.

About the manner of serving thcir food
patients sometimes have curious fancics.
In one case a woman persistcntly refused
TO take her beef tea unless the bread which
accompanied it was cut in the shape II
diamonds, while in another it was always
necessary TO servo the food in a blue basin.
for out Of nothing else whatever would
she take nOurishmcnt.
y boy who was attacked with scarlet
fever showed great Discrimination % take
food, but finally agreed to swallow what
was necessary provided he was fed in the
following way: The beef ten, or whatever
was to be given him, was put int0a silver
teapot The spout was placed in his mouth
and in this manner the food was poured
down his throat
An elderly gentleman who had spent
much of his time hunting in Africa, on
being asked If he fancied any particular
dish, replied that he would like bit Of
elephants foot! Under certain circum-
stances, we believe, this dish is a dainty
and nourishng one, but the price Of Gle
plant in this country being prohbitive
this elderly Nimrod was forced to content
himself with bcclstcak instead.
a clergyman with broken leg had a
great longing TO put on pair of stil,- q
pastime which he had never yet tried,
while man whose leg had been amuutat-
ed, although admitting the impractical
bility of the wish, declared that passion
for skating had so seized upon him since
the loss Of his limb that lie regretted bee
ing operated upon chiefly on that account.
London Answers
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

her. Bimeby | Gums upon mortal seated
beside the trail and wipin tears of sorrow
from his eyes
stranger, seq as l halts afore him,
"whyfore this yore grlefi"
"I'ye bin drivl" he walls as he looks up
with fearful eyes.
From whence to which,"
"From my claim to this yere."
In other words, sum reptile has Jumped
yer claim and told We to gitS'
That's jest the way of it, stranger, /"
sez he as he weeps sum moro and turns
his feolin's wrong side out fur me to gaze
at. - reptile Gums along last night and
takes fancy to my claim, which ar tho
richest and purtiest on Dog Creek, dog.
gone 'cr, and ho pulls his gun and gins me
three minits TO leave"
And We didn't bury himp"
"No."
"Got up and walkedf"
Eyes.
And hos thar yit, injoyin of yer
blankets and fodder and pattin hisself on
the back fur his peartnessS"
Uuess nc ar stranger, q ye oDSarve
these tears and other evidences Of my
griefF"
Il do Ye must be powerful weak I'll
the region of the craw."
That's jest what ails me. I've bin Sc
tarnal homesick and discouraged and lone
some that my sand has run out, and
dasn't yell Shoot at a kyote.''
Would ye like to git that aforesaid
sand back in yer crawl" SEE I as sits
down beside him.
Would II Ye hollerl Stranger, II We
kin tell me how to do it, I'll luv ye to the
last hour of my life'
And would ye go back and jump the
jumper who jumped yer claimY'
"Whoop! l wouldl I'd hev the reptile
killed and buried before noon! Don't hold
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
Our esteemed Democratic contem.

Our esteemed Democratic contem.
poraries that are apologizing for
their party's capture by the sugar
trust by saying that this trust is "the
product of McKinleyism" are max
ing themselves very ridiculous, but
they do not seem to know it. They
repeat it in one form or another al
most daily, and 10 seek impress it up
on the public mind as a truth that
cannot be ignored.
What do the poor biologists
mean? Do they not know that the
sugar trust was organized long be
fore the Mckinley bill was passed
or even incubated? Do they not
know that this soulless monopoly
and cormorant greed-the sugar
trust-was organized in the year of
our Lord 1887, during Grover Cleve-
lands first term? 1t was then 1t
came into existence-under Demo
cratic administration, with whose
party it has continued in close and
atfectionate sympathy ever since.
All though the 30 odd years Of Re-
publican rule this sugar trust was
not in existence. 1t was not con-
ceived until after the Democrats
came into power in 1885, and it was
born and nursed TO vigorous maturi-
ty in 1887, about the middle of Mr..
Cleveland's first presidential term.
cine product of McKinleyism," is
it? Just as much so as are the
trusts with which free trade England
is plastered over; as much so as the
failure of last years crops was due
to this years drouth.
Why should our esteemed contem
poraries be so foolish as to make
themselves so supremely ridiculous?
Do they think they are deceiving
anybody? 1t looks as if they were
very hard pushed for something to
aay.-Detroit Tribune.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
REVOLT IN LOUISIANA.

Democratic Business Men and
Politicians Out for Protection.
The sugar planters of the state
have led off in their movement
against the tariff policy of the Dem
ocratic party by large mass meet
ing at Donaldsonville in the Third
Congressional District. A meeting
will be held at Pointe a la Hatche
in the First Congressional District
and one in the Second District next
week. In these three districts, at
least, and possibly in the Sixth an
attempt will be made to elect pro-
tectionist members Of Congress who
will be free from any close party af.
fliation, and who will vote for a
speaker and the policy most likely
to help the sugar and other indus
tries of the State. The Donaldson
vile meeting was large, enthusiastic,
and determined, and it was a decid-
ed breakaway from the Democratic
party and policy. There were 800
planters, merchants, and others pres
ent, all of whom have hitherto been
Democrats, but they denounced the
late Congress, accused the Demo
cratic leaders in Congress Of treach-
cry and decided upon a line of poll
cy that will endanger the success of
the party in the sugar district. 1t
was open revolt, and the speakers all
expressed their sorrow at being
compelled to leave the Democratic
party, to which they had belonged
all their lives, but adopted the dec
laration of Senator Caffrey: "Louis-
ana first, the Democratic party
afterwards"
Mr.. Henry Mccall, State Senator,
a member Of the sugar planters
committee which went to Washing
ton and one Of the largest planters
in the State, was chosen chairman,
and speeches were made by him,
Judge r. n. Sims, L. N. Pugh,
Richard Mccall and others. Sena-
tor Henry Mccall declared that if
Hon. Andrew Price was willing to
agree to vote for a protectionist for
Speaker without regard to party and
to support measures in the interest of
the sugar, rice, and lumber indus
tries he could get the nomination;
otherwise they would look for some
other candidate. The resolutions
were as follows:
Whereas. Recent adverse tariff leg
islatiOn and threats of free sugar clear
ly indicate that the dominant faction
of the national Democratic party is
bent upon policy that will lead to the
destruction of our industries and the
impoverishment of our people, there
fore be it
Resolved. That we cannot in justice
to ourselves vote tor any candidate to
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
The Country Editor.

There is no man on earth who does more
for the community in which he lives than
the editor of "A country newspaper Toll.
ing ceaselessly from one years end TO an.
other, often with insufficient help and un-
able to secure assistance, he manages to
issue regularly his weekly paper
No entertainment is projected by the
church that he is not called on 20 give IL
free puff If "A citizen dies. his columns
are thrown open for liberal obituaries.
while births and weddings are ali noticed
and arelof considerable length. For any
enterprise of any kind the community
looks for booming
In n thousand ways he helps his coun-
ty, and every issue of his paper is worth
n great deal TO his community. But few
people appreciate the duties the country
editor must overcome TO get his paper out
He is about as hardworking and as poorly
paid as an average laboror in the country.
Southern Ulster.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

I'm the power HE HAD GUN IN EACH
fullest peart est HAND.
and most enthusiastic critter In all Cher
okce as it is, he boots in reply, and he
pops away at me. / lodges and drops and
gifts to my dugout, but aforo / could git
my shotgun the cantankcrous critter be-
gins to feel homcsick and gallops off.
secs him Jump in the saddle as 1 fired, but
the distance was so fur that his ole wom-
an probably picked out all the shot with
table fork.
Next day my boss strayed off, and l
went over lords Dog Greek to look fur
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

The Maine election speaks for it.
self. 1t rolls up the largest Re-
publican majority ever polled in
in that state. The Republicans have
carried every county in the state and
reelected Reed, Dinley, Milligan and
Boutelle to congress by unpreced-
emily large majorities. All previous
tidal waves were mere ripples COM
pared to this.
To appreciate the size of the Re.
publican victory in Maine this year,
comparisons should DE made with
previous years. The Republican
plurality rolled up Monday is re-
ported to be over $1,000. Two
years ago this month it was 1851,
and in November following the
presidential election it was 1897.
The highest record reached in Maine
previous to this year was in the
Greeley campaign of 1872, when the
Democracy was crushed in every
northern state.
That year the Republican majority
in Maine was 32,335, or about 5000
less than it is this "of year." Com.
pared with the September vote of
1892, the Republican gain is over
$4,000! All the Republican con-
gresham are reelected by vastly in
creased majorities and the legisla.
ture is reported Republican by 1875
majority.
This tremendous landslide, follow
ing the great Republican triumph in
Vermont, is another notice to the
enemy that the Democratic party
cannot carry single northern state.
1t is another evidence of renewed
public confidence in the Republican
party-the only true peoples party.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
TIVE MOON Of RoMANng,
Noveilsts Seldom &c. our suvery Satellite
In Che E.nht Lll.ar.

In tho Right Place.
Tho noyclists viii not let the youna
moon" or the crescent mo0nn alone. and
three times out Of four they coa,riyo Ia
get IL into tho wrong place. How ID OK
plain the conviction chat !aunts the minds
OF SO many of them thut Pee crescent moon
may be seen almost any fine evening ris-
ing gracefully In the east is altogether be-
You'd us. Tho point seems % D.. ONO for
psychologists. HDic Is tliu.. tGut newer
was seen since the world began, ull set "a
number OF otherwise sane gontiumcn are
firmly persuaded that 10 is "a regularly
recurring natural phenomenon.
Surely the philosophy Of this hallucina-
ton deserves investigation. The last case
that has come under our notice is well
written story called "a Comedy Of
Masks by Earnest Dawson and Arthur
Moore Two friends are sitting out ono
summer evening looking over the Thames,
and the story goes on, BY this time tho
young moon had risen, and its cold light
shimmercd over the misty river \ nov.
elist need not be an astronomer, but he
should at least try to draw from nature
and should not pretend to have seen tho
young moon rising at the hour when il
was being packed of to bed
Some day perhaps little acquaintance
at first hand with Che broadcast facts of ma
ture Will be thought requisite for writ.
ing good novel, but the time is not yet
Meantime, if our novelists would try To bear
in mind that the young moon, like other
young things, goes to bed early, that nature
does not trust it out late at night, they
might get into the way OF seeing il at ths
right timc and in the ri ,ht places and no5
treat Us To cold shimmcrs" that are only
moonshines in the least favorable sense OF
the term
A singular blunder occurs in an article
entitled Notes From a Marine Biological
Laboratory, written by man of science
and college professor and printed I'm tho
February number of this magazine ItI
reads as follows: Ii was beautifully
clear and starry nigh, WHOM We ',d
into Windward passage. The gray noun.
tains Of Cuba outlined against the north
ern horizon We're slowly fading from view.
where the crescent moon ro.e cut OF tho
waves in the east Popular Science
Monthly.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
Bored Flow" rs.

A large number OF flowers are bored ma
It is believed, by bumblcbcos. They col
lect the nectar i'm this way instead of en-
tering by the mouth of the flower. Dr. J.
Schneck of Mount Carmel, Ills, one of
our most observing botanists, believes
these are not bumblcbcCs, members Of
the genus bombus, but belong to tho
genus xylocopa, popularity known as Dor
ers or carpenter bees. He has certainly
seen these creatures Sitting the tubes ct
clover and bumblcbccs entering the mouth
Il theusual way. -Meehan's Monthly.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

represent us in Congress who is not
pledged TO the protection of sugar, rice,
lumber, salt, and all other great Ameri-
can industries.
Resolved. That our candidate must
be free to vote for "A Speaker of the
House and to effect an organization
favorable to protection no matter TO
what political party said Speaker may
belong.
The resolutions were unanimously
adopted. 1t looks now as though
a serious revolt were threatened, as
the men at the head of it are promi-
nent not only in sugar but in polit-
zeal circles as well. 1t is impossible
to determine as yet what political
effect it will have.-Inter Ocean.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
BY ACCLAIM alton.
c. w. Martin for State Senator.

The senatorial convention last
Friday for the 10th senatorial dis
trict was very enjoyable event. A
full delegation from Gratiot and
several Of Mr.. Martins friends were
present. Mr.. Martin was nomi-
mated by reclamation, after which a
committee was sent to escort the
nominee to the hall and the conven-
ton was favored with a short, but
bright and spicy speech. We are
certain that the 10th district has
made no mistake in their selection
for senator. Mr.. Martin is a young,
bright active business man and has
always proven himself worthy Of
public trust in whatever capacity
has been allotted him. There are
probably few men in.the district that
know the needs of the people better
than he, or one that will try to serve
his constituents any more faithful.
His election is beyond doubt as
the whole district is unanimous in
praise and support for him.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

The inconsistent absurdity of such
q proposed departure should be en-
phasized by the suggestion that the
wool of the farmer be put on the
free list and the protection of tax
alton be placed around the iron ore
and coal, of corporations and CAPT
talists. How can we face the peo-
pie after INDUCING in such outrage
Gus determinations and violations Of
principles.-Pres. Cleveland's letter
to Wilson.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

toUrs and causes WAS BOOTIFUL."
the heart to cease it's palpytatin. If II
don't gin yer vitalparts an enthusiastic
commoshun, then ye war born fur wolf "
Iii one mint his tears had ceased TO fall,
and his right ear was twitchin. In two
minits he was griffin his teeth and twitch.
in both ears and worlin his toes. When
he had begun to jump up and crack his
heels together and YELL puts a gun in hia
paw and seq;
Stranger, yer vital part ar now in q
condishun fur tghtin. Go and find the
reptile who driv ye from whence to width.
erl'
"Whoop Whoop-eel Waugh Whoop"
he yells as off he goes, and in 10 minits he
war outer sight.
1 logged along and took it easy, and
bimcby Gums to his claim. He was sit.
tin on a soapbox In front of his dugout
and the smile on his face was bootiful to
see. He handed me back my gun and
pintcd to ards the Colorado line An OBJ.
jick was moyin over the face Of the airth
and draggin one leg behind him as If he
had lost his boundin enthoosiasm. un-
dcrstood We embraced and said adew, and
went home feelin that virchew ar her
own reward. AUSTIN KEENE.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
}A5 IN A HURRY.
,JMFlN JOE MEETS A STRANGER WHO
CURVED WITH AMBITION.

And lio Ia Promptly Followed by Fellow
on Spotted Horse Who Means business
ana Has No Time Ia Lose-The Man With
Smile.
was sittin in front of my dugout and
communin with natur whom l heard gal
lopin down the trail, and looked up to SEQ
q Teller cumin over the ridge on a Mexican
burro. He was a-cumin slappcty slap
and 'peared to be In the biggest kind of "a
hurry to git outer North America afore
shutdown.
Hello, what's upS" / yells as he gifts
within hootin distance.
It's jest my ambishus way!' he replies
as he gifts brace with his feet and brings
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

gin We them very
fcciin's, stranger.
One dose of my
Cherokee sassy
PARTLY will make
ye willin to fur
give the kuss who
stole yer burro,
and If yen buy a
box of my Magic
cement yen wish
he'd cum back and
steal yer boss as
well.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

out false hopes to
me, stranger! I'm
u lone man, and a
grleyin man, and
fur, fur from ole
Missoury!'
Take one dose
Of my Cherokee
sassyparilly, SCI
/ as / fetches out
o bottle and hands
It over. 1t acts
directly on the
craw. 1t works up
sand. 1t dries the
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
Al townships and wards will be en-
Republican State Ticket.

For GoYernOr-
JOHN L RICH, Lapeer
For Lieutenant Governor
ALFRED AIILNES, Branch
For Secretary of State
WASHINGTON GARDNER, Calhoun
For State Treasurer
j. NJ. WILKINSON, Marquette
For Auditor General
STANLEY w. TURNER, Roscommon
For Attorney General
FRED A. MAYNARD, Kent
For State Land Commissioner
WILLIAM A. FRENCH, Pressure Isle
For Superintendent of Public Instruction
IL. X. PATTENGILL. Ingham
For Member of state board Of Education
PERRY L. POWERS, Wexford
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14

tho burro to halt.
Whats yer
pertickl er am
bishun jest at this
timer SEE / as I
looks him over.
Fur to keep
about two miles
ahead Of the other
, Teller. - he SEE as
n ripplin smile rip
pies over his sin
hardened counte-
nance.
Then / take IL
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
No Drop There.

"How's busincssf'
Bad, " replied the merchant, who does
not advertise. The bottom has dropped
out of every line of goods in my store,
with one exception.
whats that"
"Tho thermometers. " - Washington
Ceor
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
Architectural Note.

Judgc--What trade do you follow
Vagrant--I am builder.
''Whut do you buildt'
Castles in the air. Texas Siftingx
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
Graham & Morton
TRANSPORTATION CO.
LAKE AND RAIL ROUTE no
CHICAGO VIA. ST. JOSEPH

The favorito passenger steamers City of
CHICAGO and "thicOra' make double daily
trips between Benton HGrbor st. Joseph and
Chicago. connecting a. It. Joseph with the G
". NJ. Ey. Equipments and service the best
and time less Than by any other lake route
The following schedule Will be observed on
and after juno lUth
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
He Felt II.

This is hard world, said the balloon
ist az Inc dropped out Of the basket and Lie
ia stone quarry. Brooklyn Life.
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
FRIDAY, SEPT. IA, 1894.
Republican County Convention.

A Republican County Convention for Gratlot
county will be held az the court house in the
village of Ithaca, on Saturday the Ind day of
September, 1884, at IL o'clock a. IN. for the
purpose of placing in nomination candidates
for county officers as follows: Sheriff, County
Clerk, Treasurer, Register of Deeds, Prosecu-
ting Attorney, County surveyor, Two Circuit
Court Commissioners and two COronors; also
a candidate for Representative to the State
Legislature and for the transaction of such
other business as may regularly come before
said convention.
The several townships and wards will be en-
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
Clarity.

He stood with bowed head for mo-
mont.
His attitude was one Of indecision.
VIII YOU" he asked at length, make
yourself clearer
Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-09-14
10 CHICAGO

Leave ST. Joseph NJ AGO p. m daily oxccpt
Sunday. and at ~ p. m. daily including sun
day; leave so Joseph Sundays only. at G:rO D.
IN. Leave Chicago from dock foot of Wabash
ave. at 9;J, a. m, and il;;J D. m. daily in
Guiding sunday ; also leave Chicago at goo D
IN, Saturday only.