The Washington times., 1894-09-09

"Have you ever seen hop ioint?" asked
Gus as he approached us to-day.
As rule we always say ''Yes" to such ques-
tions, as we do not wish 70 be understood as
at all new; but Gus knows us and there is
little use Of trying our abilities on him. So we
said ''No," and he offered to show US one. II
was altogether too early when he came in, 20
we consumed the afternoon and some corn
beef and cabbage. which occupied the time
till after dark. We then started south on one
Of the busy streets, and had not gone far be-
fore a gentleman standing in front OF his
store asked us II we didn't need pair Of
trousers We looked at him and he caught
us by the arm and insisted that he had some
bargains. We glared at him and he smiled.
We tried TO freeze him with stare and be
blushed delightedly.
He had three sons, who looked like him,
and they all came up and told us how de-
lighted they were to see Us. So we remained.
They pulled down a lot of clothes and told
us how much they cost, and a lot more that
had been made for Stephen A. Douglas and
refused because they were too small
well, he ought to have taken them, even
II they did bind him, we said.
'Vy?" asked the proprietor, getting ready
10 laugh.
ooh. because he hasn't any other suit, +"
said we. And the family smiled.
We then started 70 20 out, but they stop
ped US. and declared they had made no sale,
though they had lost lots OF time waiting on
us.
'sweII." said we, with a pleasant attempt
at wit. give US the clothes and send the bill
to Frank Collier" And while they were
laughing we took Gus and escaped.
GOING DOWNSTAIRS.
Quite distance farther on Gus stopped at
the head OF a flight OF stairs and wanted 10 60
down We objected, because the place was
Chinese laundry. and we wanted 10 see hop
Joint. Gus mistook that for a joke also, and
smiled so a cabman at the corner heard him.
We went inside the laundry and Gus said
some words in French 20 yellow gentleman
in the Office, who had no hair, excepting
few long strands at the back OF his head.
He replied in the same language. apologiz-
inP. as we thought for the smell of the place,
which was rather too strong for use. Gus
opened the door Of a little room and dis
closed a beautiful woman lying on low Ia
BILE with ChinRman near her her trying TO
melt a lump of shoemakers wax which he
held on a knitting needle over the flame of
barRain-counter lamp. After he had melted
Ii until his embarrassment at seeing Us had
worn away he rubbed il on the bowl of
lArge-stsmmed pipe and handed it TO the
lady.
she could scarcely stretch her pretty lips
over the mouth-piece, but she did the best
she could, and after she had taken a Whit or
two sighed deeply and regarded US with Ian
guid interest. We asked her how long she
had been smoking and she said about fifteen
minutes. We then observed quite number
of other customers in the house but the &C
commodations in all cases were the same.
One man asked US If We wanted to hit the
pipe, and we declined, because we We're afraid
OF breaking 1t.
HELD Up BY WOMAN.
We then went up on the street and a large
woman met US and asked US to step in
stairway till she told US the story Of her life
As we retired from the gaze OF the world 10
that extent she put one foot behind US,
grabbed our swan-like neck with one hand
and our watch chain with the other. and
plRyfully undertook to leave US. But we lev
eled blow at her with our cane, and she
dropped the watch, jarriEg the building, and
addressing US as a son OF a screwdriver,
asked us II we would hit woman. She
then tried 10 trip US again. and We put her
under our arm and started down street in
her society.
At the corner we met q policeman, and, as
she assured him she was perfect lady, he
arrested US for disturbing her peace and took
us TO the statiOn-house. A pleasant gentle
man there told US he would bail US out for S.
and we asked him If he took US for boat
and, il he did, did he think we were leaking
But the sergeant in charge recognized d US,
and asked US if there was anything he could