davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04

The prisoner was a bold-faced va
grant, and the judge had it in for him
from the start
''How many times have you been
here?" he asked.
Really. your honor, I never kept
count after the twentieth time
''I'll give you six months" said the
judge sterniy.
Cali right, your honor"
'Rut it isn't all right. It is all wrong,
and you ought to be ashamed of your
self"
"Well, your honor" was the impu.
dent response, you oughtn't to com.
plain. The state gets my services for
nothing, and you make it pay you for
yours" and the judge gave Hmm thirty
days more for contempt.-Detroit Free
Press
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
August
Flower

Miss G. G. McCLAvE, School
teacher, 753 Park Place, E1mira, N.
Y. "This Spring while away from
home teaching my first term in a
country school I was perfectly
wretched with that human agony
called dyspepsia. After dieting for
two weeks and getting no better, a
iriend wrote me, suggesting that I
take August Flower. The very next
day purchased a bottle. I am de-
lighted to say that August Flower
helped me so that I have quite re-
covered from my indisposition." q
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
THE DUCHESS OF GORDON.
How She Raised Her Regiment OF High
landerS.

HOW she 1S1kSeO heSlIhtu
landers.
Near the close of the last century
rumors of a French invasion alarmed
the country and reused military ar61or
to such an extent as to lead to fresh
regiments being raised. In one of a
series of very interesting sketches by
Hon. Mrs. Armytage of British Man
sions and Their Mistresses Past and
Present." recently published in Tins
ley's Magazine, the raising by the IA
NOUS duchess of the battalion of Cor
don Highlanders, which has since held
such distinguished place in our mill
tary annals, is thus described: he
duchess of Gordon is said to have had
a wager with the prince regent as to
which of them would first raise a bat
TALON, and that the fair lady reserved
to herself the power of offering a re-
ward even more attractive than the
kings shilling.
Eat all events. the duchess and Lord
Huntly started off on their errand, and
between them soon raised the required
number of men. The mother and SON
freuuented every fair in the country
side, begging the fine young High
landers to come forward in support of
king and country and to enlist in her
regiment, and, when all other argu-
ments had failed, rumor stated that a.
kiss from the beautiful duchess won
the doubtful recruit.
s.She soon announced at headquar-
tiers the formation of a regiment, and
entered into all the negotiations with
the military authorities in most bust
nesslike manner, reporting that the
whole regiment were Highlanders save
thirty -fve. Lord Huntly was given
the first command of this corps, them
and ever since known as the Nine
ty-seconib, or Gordon Highlanders, and
wearing the tartan of the clan. "
Alexander Macpherson.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
EN- ROUTE TO RIO.

Elnal Orders Given tho Cruiser New YoYA
and She Starts At Once for Rio Janeiro-
The Miantonomoh May Follow Her-A
Strong United States Force In Brazilian
Waters-Rear Admiral Benham win Be
In Command.
WAsHINdroN. Dec. 81. = The New
York has sailed from the Brooklyn
navy yard for Rio de Janeiro. All
doubt in regard to her destination was
set at rest by Secretary Herbert
announcing that she had been
ordered to Rio and would start from
New York at once. Mr.. Herbert said
he had issued no orders directing the
double-turreted monitor Miantonomoh
to join the American feet at Rio It
is likely. however, that the big mont
tor will be sent on that duty. She is
now being prepared for sea with all
hands, and no denial is made at the
navy department of the report that
Rio will be the destination. The work
of fitting out this vessel will be finished
within a day or two
The New York's arrival at Rio will
increase the force of United States yes
sells there to 6ve-all modern cruisers
a greater number of United States YES
sells assembled at one point to protect
American interests since the civil war.
The Charleston, the Newark and the
Detroit are already at Rio, and the San
Francisco is due there in less than a
week.
1t will take the New York about
seventeen days to reach Rio Janeiro.
She will probably make the voyage,
5000 miles, without stopping for coal.
Rear-Admiral Benham, who will as
sumo command of the United States
naval forces at Rio on his arrival, will
retain his flag on the San Francisco.
but it is likely that on the arrival of
the New York she will become the flag
ship of the South Atlantic station.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04

to the upper deestric' to the circus, but
I said the chickens crowed before sun
down, an it was an indication of sud-
den tornadoes.
"Well, bout ten o'clock heerd the
shingles slappin' onto the lean-to lively,
an then got up an prepared a good
meal. He eat as though he enjoyed it,
an seemed uncommon socible.
''That's all, she said, after a mo-
ment's silence. in which she smiled to
herself. 'SeDce then he's been diff
rent. When he has job to do he goes
at it, an all the crow-fyin' an OWL
hootin' in two counties couldn't skeer
him into stoppin' Youths Compan.
ion.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
A Modern Financfer.

Business Man-See here, sir. You
gave me check on the Highly bank.
and find that there is no such institu-
ton.
Financier (who has been playing in
hard luck)-Hold on to the check my
dear sir. It will be all right. The bank
isn't in operation yet.
ssSir!''
.'Oh, it's all right After get few
thousand of those checks out, the hold
ers viii fnd it to their interest to club
together and help start the bank. IN.
Y. Weekly.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
HONESTY OVERCOME.
He Was In the Milk Trade, but His Scrupl<
Soon Wore on.

He Was I'm the Milk Trade, but His Scruples
Soon Wore on.
A Brooklyn man from Wiltshire,
whose ideas of milk had beenperverted
and abused by contact with the COW in
its native haunts, recently engaged
himself with the proprietor of that
animal engaged in supplying milk to
customers.
The second day the new hand re-
signed. He did not like the business
and wanted to go.
An investigation showed that after
washing the cans the day before the
water, as, is usual, was left in them.
Instead Of the can which he should
have taken he put the days milk into
those having the washings and started
on his rounds.
On coming back he learned his error:
He resigned at once rather than face
the customers.
"Why, it was cheatin'." he said. cot
the worst kind. I can go up to a can
mons mouth and let 'em shoot me, but
Inever want to set foot in them houses
where carried round that water"
His employer demonstrated. He had
no time to engage another man, and it
enc in ti1se. But the young man was
inhexible.
'No-ro; he had been brought up to
be honest and couldn't look 'em in the
face again
"WelI, I'll tell you what I'll do" said
his employer desperately, I'll give
you two dollars to go around this>once,
and if you can't stand the abuse you
needn't try it again"
After much urging the young. man,
consented. He came. back with a. very
curious look on his face.
''Wels," said his employer, you, came
out alive, after ala Did YOU have a
hard time of it?''
'4No-no!' said the man; ''tliey GSa
not say word anywhere. except I'm
old woman, who told me sls thought
the milk was improving was a Bit
richer than yesterday. You must have
forgotten to sl<innit."
His employer was sad and silent. and
that young man is ntill in the business
Boston Travelan
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
Flows Ear Above Sc. Level.

The most elevated river in the world
is the Desag aadero, in Bolivia It is OF
considerable depth, and its whole
length, from the village Desaguadero.
at the soush extremity of Titicaca, to
the north end Of the Lake Aullagas, is
about one hundred and eighty miles.
The avexageselevation of tho valley or
tableland of Desaguadero above the
level of the sea is about thirteen thou
sand feet. The river whose source lies
highest is the Indus. which rises on
the north of the Kallas Parbat noun
tain in Thibet, twenty-five thousand
feet above sea level Brooklyn Eagle.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
AN OLD TIMER.
Death OF an Ex-Slave known to Have
Been 12I Years Old.

Death OF an Ex-SIave known to Have
Been 12I Years Old.
NEW YORK, Dec. GA special to
the Sun from Lyons, n Y, says:
James Morris, commonly known as
James Rice, a former slave, died in
Lyons. Sunday. lei years os age. He
was born on the Rice plsntation in
Virginia, near Roanoke, in June IS,
1772. After the death of his master he
became the property of Bal
man Rice who moved to Lyons
and engaged in tha manufacture
of tanning mills When emancipation
was proclaimed James was set free,
but he chose to stay with his master,
and after the latter's Death remained
with the widow in Icons until her
death. She left him che life use of
house and lot where he died. The Rice
heirs have in their possession a record
of the several slaves, and the age Of
James Morris given as 121 years
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
Serious ANTHRAX Riot in Sicily.

PALERMO, Dec. 27.-During an anti.
tax-receipt meeting near this city the
government offices were set on fire
and were completely destroyed. A riot
was caused in Valguarnera. yesterday,
by police commissary arresting a So
cialist who was preaching revolt. A
thousand men and women stormed the
gendarmes' barracks in an attempt to
rescue the prisoners, but were re-
pulsed. The mob afterwards set fire
to the town hall, the post office. the
magistrates office. and the residences
of the mayor, police commissary and
several citizens.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
A PERPLEXING CASE,
The Judge Decided that He Had No Jur
dictiOn.

The Judge Decided that He Had No Juris-
diction.
The courthouse of small country
town in Illinois was filed with a curl
Gus throng gathered to witness the
proceedings of divorce case begun by
young woman whose husband was
| town marshal of the place.
A string of legal lights supported the
suit on both sides, which gave evil
dence of a long and tedious fight.
The judge to whom the case had
been assigned was enjoying his first
term, and his conscientious face showed
that he would discharge the duties of
his office with the greatest care. but
the town marshal's suit was one of
universal interest in the COM
munity, and the worn look around
less nights, which he had spent
in bordering over law books
to hit upon a decision that would
make lasting impression upon
the people, and to show them that he
was ably equipped with the necessary
knowledge and sense of justice for the
Office to which he had been elected.
The complainant's side rested. The
defendant was then called to the
stand, and the opposing counsel began
to rigidly cross-examine him.
where were you married?" he was
asked.
Chicago" the defendant answered
bluntly.
Every WE'LL" said the lawyer. "Now,
Mr.. Blank, where did you go after the
ceremony?''
"We came down and visited the
fair"
Game down from where?"
From the air." he answered with a
chucl1le.
GLOW did you manage to get in the
air?" the lawyer asked, surprised.
''Why, we were married two hundred
and fifty-eight feet above the Garth"
''How did that happen?"
''You see," he explained, 81 went to
Chicago to meet my wife, and we both
decided that it would be novel and
inexpensive wedding tour to take
ride on the Ferris wheel, and to i'm
prove on the idea, she afterward sug-
gested that the ceremony be performed
on t he trip. 1, of course, consented,
and minister came with us, and we
were married at the highest point in
the revolution of the wheel"
AT this point the rustic maidens
looked longingly at one another in
anticipa ton of such glorious wedding
trip, while the judge, with a long
breath, arose to give his first decision.
''Gentlemen," he said. 81 find by
the testimony that this case is beyond
my jurisdiction, and am wholly with
out power to decide. In the evidence
it appears that the couple were mar
ried two hundred and fifty-eight feet
above the level of the ground. and
there is no authority vested in me or
this office by which 1 am given juris-
diction over events transpiring in the
air.
''The parties them" he continued, as
he threw his head back, with an air of
great Importance, will have to ap-
pear at the court of the district in
which the ceremony was performed, or
else remarry on solid and substantial
earth instead of in mid-rir, and try
their case over again. "-Detroit Free
Press.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
SOLD TO RUSSIA.
Five Steamships to be Used In Connc0-
tion with the Siberian Railway.

Five Steamships to be Used In Connc0-
tion with the Siberian Railway.
NEW YORK. Dec. &c. p. Hunting
ton has confirmed the report that the
Russian government has bought of the
United States & Brazil Steamship
Co., in which he is largely in
terested, five steamships to be
used by the Amoor Steamship Co.
in connection with the Russian govern
mcnt's transcontinental railroad in Si-
IBERIA. With other vessels purchased
this will give Russia the cont, olling
commerce fleet. w. D. Richards. of
Chicago. agent. for Russia, is now at
Tacoma, selecting ports for the steam
shipS
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
They Got Stun.

Sr. LOUIS. Dee. 27.-Notwithstand.
ing the fact that Express Messenger
Bransford's statement and Conductor
Whites official report, at least the re-
port given out to the press, that moth
ing was taken from the safes on the
Mobile & Ohio train No $, which was
held up at Forest Lawn, I'LL, Saturday
night, the information comes from a
member of the train crew, that the
local safe was completely Quilted and
every dollar shipped out of st. Louis
by the Southern Express Co. to Cairo
and points north of Cairo was made
away with by the bandits
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
An Eastern, Crook.

ST. LOUIS. Dec. 27.-In the person Of
Charles Thomas, who now occupies a
cell in the four courts, the police have
captured a daring eastern crook.
Thomas was arrested Monday on a
charge of carrying concealed weapons.
When searched, besides a revolver, a
large. ugly-looking slungshot heavily
loaded and ready for use. a complete
set of new safe-blowing tools of the
most improved style, best steel, were
found on his person, together with a
bottle of powder.
Thomas will be held until more can
be learned of him.s
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
He Didn't Understand at First.

I'm sure, gentlemen, I'm deeply in.
debted to you for this elegant clock. /"
"Yes. It's an alarm clock"
Eyes? I-ah-"
"Yes. Y'see, doctor, sometimes You
get so interested in your sermon that
you don't seem to kind O realize how
times flying; and we thought if you
could kind O. set this for about twenty
three minutes and then hide it under
the pulpit, the congregation would be
ever so much relieved. IN. Y. Re
corder.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
An Ancient Port.

The earliest dates assigned for the
foundation of the port of Marseilles,
France, is B. C. 100000, when. it is
alleged, certain Ph9nician settlers es-
tablished trading ports in this locality;
and this theory-that the city owes it's
origin to the Phenicians-has been
strengthened by certain archaeological
traces which were brought to light
during the opening up of streets in
1868. Classical tradition, however, but
with less supporting evidence, ascribes
the foundation of "Massila" to colony
of the Phoenicians who emigrated with
families from Asia Minor to escape the
tyranny of Cyrus (B. c. 6OO), and of
whom mention is made by Herodotus
and Horace. To whatever founder the
city may look for its origin, its rapid
development is matter upon which
there lies no shadow of doubt. It soon
acquired sufficient force to enable it to
contend with and conquer Carthage in
a sea fight, and it was looked upon at
an early date as an important factor
among the Mediterranean powers
The Mariner
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
Death of an Eminent Lawyer.

Boston, Dec. 27.-Henry w. Paine,
the eminent lawyer, died at his resi-.
dence in Cambridge yesterday morn.
ing, aged So. Owing to advancing
years and poor health, Mr.. Paine re-
tired from practice in 1856, and since
that time, although he had often Wis.
tied his Boston office, and had fire.
quently been seen in the courts, he had
done practically no business. In 1854
he received the degree of LII. d. from
Colby university.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
willing to Pay Upon Hi. Own Terms.

DENVER, Col. 2T.-John A. Perry,
brother of William Perry, formerly
clerk of the circuit court, whose ac-
counts are short several thousand dol
lars, writes that Judge Miller is NOR
ally and legally bound to account for
two-thirds of the shortage, and if ne
will do SO, Mr.. Perry will pay the bal
Rnce.
He says that there is due the Office
from litigants some $4,000, and this
ought to be considered and reduction
of this amount made in the deficit
He also denies that the deficit amounts
to e1s,0 200.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
A Popular Definition

Teachef-Johnnie,c can you tell me
what is the definition of Joy?
Johnny-Yes'm. It's receSS--De-
troit Free Press.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
MRS. SPROUTS DISCIPLINE.

How She Induced Her Husband to Do q
Much-Needed job.
Sailors are said to be more supersti-
tious than other men, and it is certain
that in their journeyings round the
world they gather many strange fan
cies. Ambrose Sproul, known in his
native village as "Cap'n AM" was no
exception to the rule. His head was
full of notions of the strangest and
most foolish sort. He was possessed,
too, by spirit of Incidence. So much
all the neigh bors knew, and good Mrs.
Sproul, loving and faithful wife,
often found herself called upon to ex-
tenuate and apologize for his short
comings in the eye of the public.
"Cap'n Am is pufic'ly willin' to work
when he gifts started" she would often
say, 'but have to tackle him oncom-
mon severe to start him."
After a time, however, it was noticed
that Capt. Am had mended his ways
and grown all at once very industrious.
When Mrs. Sproul was spoken to about
the matter she gave the following ex-
plantations:
"You see that ole lean-to on our house
has needed shinglin' for a good spell
and had said everything to the cap'n
to have him do it. Bus he KEEP putter-
in round and putin me off.
He'd say when it was fair it didn't
need shinglin', and when it rained he
couldn't do it. Some days he'd git
ready to go to work, an then he'd re-
member he saw a crow flynn alone,
bein' sure sign of foul weather, OF
else they were fyin' in circles an
calm.
Sometimes it was that he'd dreamt
of bein' in deep water, an then he
wouldn't trust himself on the ruff for
fear of accident.
"Well, one day he got fairly to work
an begun to hev hope. when all of a
sudden an owl flew round the barn
three times an hooted. Down came
Ambrose off the ruff an hurried into
the house. IT'S comin'-a terrible hur'
ricane! he says. AN owl hootln' in
daylight is a sure sign!
i've got a torble good temper, but
must say was riled. 1 didn't squirt
out. though, but jest left my work an
TUX a book to read. 1 KEEP readin'. an
by an by the cap'n says: Amt II
bout time for mess"
II looked up KIM Oh SurpriSeo az
saws 1: We don't want to bother much
bout eatin' in sech a terrible gale as
this
ssAbout two o'clock he got himseli
some bread an milk, but he never dri'
another nail 1 didn't git any regular
supper, an the next mornin' didn't gil
mn. / said / dreamt of a white horse
an it was sure sign of death, an
wanted to go decent insmy bed while
was prepared.
HE was in q terrible takin' to go owe
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04
A Real Help-Mate,

ssWhen she married him he was q
poor, young oculist, but she's helped
him greatly"
by economizing?'
mo. By carrying her umbrella over
her shoulder all the time."-Brooklyu
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1894-01-04

$50 he worked pretty hard at
school this year?' well, should say
SO. You ought to see the perfectly
magnificent suit Of hair he has.
ter Ocean.
Kansas agitator. [volume] (Garnett, Kan.) 1890-1905, 1894-06-21
THE PEOPLES PLATFORM.
Adopted in National Convention AZ
Omaha, July q, 1902.

Assembled upon the 10th anniversary of the
Declaration of Independence, the Peoples
party of America in their first national coD-
venton, invoking upon / cir action the bless
ing of Almighty God, puts forth in the name
and on behalf of the people If this country the
following preamble and declaration of princi-
pies:
The conditions which surround us justify
our action; we meet in the midst of nation
brought to the verge of moral, political and
material ruin. Corruption dominates the bal
lot box, the legislatures, the congress, and
touches even the ermine of the bench. The
people are demoralized; most of the states
have been compelled to isolate the voters at
the polling places in order to prevent universal
intimidation or bribery. The newspapers are
largely subsidized or muzzed, public opinion
silenced, business Frustrated, our homes COW
cred with mortgages, labor impoverished and
the land concentrating in the hands of the
capitalists. The urban workmen are denied
the right Of organization for self projections;
imported pauperiZed labor beats down their
wages; hireling standing army, unrecog-
nized by our laws, is established to shoot them
down, and they are rapidly degenerating into
European conditions. The fruits Of the toll of
millions are boldly stolen to build up colossal
fortunes for a few, unprecedented in the his
tory of mankind, and the possessors of these
in turn, despise the republic and endangcr
liberty. FROM The same pfollnc womb or gov
ernmental injustice we breed the two great
classes-tramps and mllionaires.
The national power to create money is ap-
propriated to enrich bondholders; vast pub
lie debt, payable in legal tender currency, has
been funded into gold bearing bonds, thereby
adding millions to the burdens Of the people.
Silver, which has been accepted as coin since
the dawn of history, has been demonetized to
add to the purchasing power of gold by de-
creasing the price of all forms of property as
well as human labor. The supply of currency
is purposely abridged to fatten usurers, bank
rupt enterprise and enslave industry.
vast conspiracy against mankind has been
organized on two continents, and it Is rapidly
taking possession of the world. If not met
and overthrow at once it forebodes terrible
social commissions, the destruction of civilza-
ton or the establishment of an absolute des-
potism.
We have witnessed for more that a quarter
of century the struggles of two great politi-
cal parties for power and plumber, while griey-
GUS wrongs have been inflicted upon a suffer-
ing people, We charge that the controlling
influences dominating both these parties have
permitted the existing dreadful conditions to
develop without serious efforts to prevent or