Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1894-09-26
PITH AND POINT.

A music rack-Inc poor performer.
Puck.
A trade secret-how to get the be-s
OF the other fellow. Truth.
Columtus's egg was one OF the bes.
.okes ever cracked. Truth.
The quinine manufacturer seldom.
complains of his bitter lot.-Buffa,u
Courier.
The average man doesn't get mucl
Of show in ten-cent circus. Buffalo
Courier.
To address an army officer below IL
rratle is to offer him II raul. insult.
Buffalo Courier.
4 boor and an inflated egotist nra
lnfrcquently found i'll the same hice.
Kansas City Star.
a really pretty girl is not often vain
Che is simply candid and Intelligent
critic c-Washington Star.
The man who was dissatisfied VII,
he menagerie said it was q beestly
ttfair. -Binghamton Leader.
Not one man in twenty can give h
eansible reason, if You ask him, why
he keeps dog. Ram Horn.
Nowadays man is >-ore apt /" be
,pplaudedfor saying agood thing than
for doing n good thing. .-Truta.
One of the poets says We car liv.
without cooks, and many leG-es say
they can't live wi, i them. m.-Philadel
ohin Times.
e-"Charlev Touchall never SEEM
20 work What does he do for liz
.ng?" He with sigh ''His friends
Buffalo Courier.
Clerk-'I woLld like to get Of to
bury my aunt" Employer-''Nery
Well, but don't let it occur again. -
Richmond Monthly.
IN the fine arts galleries: The Con
noisseur--' ''That is Nandyke- Nine.
"Really? I thought it wul
III oil painting. Chicago Record.
The pen is mightier than the sword,
The sayings truthful quite,
Excepting when your fountain pen
Determines not to write.
Washington star
Tommie-'Do you know what
1raught horses are like" Freddie
Course do; they are the ones that
travel like the wind. "--Chicago Inter
Ocean.
Treetop-"A dollar for pulling on,
tooth?" Dentist Yes; You took
gas" Treetop-''How much thou.
sand do you charge for that ?"-Brook-
lyn Life.
Townley-- Aren't the heavy dew,
out in the suburbs annoying" Rusti-
cus-"Oh, no. get used to them. [
belong to SO many secret societies, You
know. .'--Philadelphia Record.
Pepper That boy of mine is n reg
nlar phenomenon. Bacheller (wearily)
I'm what wey?' Pepper six
years old and never said bright thing
in his life. "-Pittsburg Dispatch
The Butcher (haughtily % MADAM
ny reputation rests upon my meat"
Doubling Customer 'Well, if it's as
tough as that laet steak you sent me,
EEL sorry for you. Buffalo Courier
Teacher lin physiology class)-
Now, Johnny, how many senses have
you?' Johnny (very prnmp.ly)-
Five" Correct. Now, what are
they?" ''All pennies. "-Rochester
Democrat.
A careful young man uptown whc,.
calling on his ''best girl always an
nounces himself by knocking. If ho
We're to come in with a ring it might
be considered proposal --Philadel.
phia Record.
Young Collegian-''If only peopi-
inew rs much as they think they
know Vassar Graduate (wickedly)
-''Why, then the undergraduates
would be delivering lectures {, t,o
professors. Vogue.
"Gusher is not very happy IN h.
;hoice of adjectives. VIZ eo?"
''Miss Gumms fished fo- corn 1limcnt
by asking what lie thcugat of Ter
slippers" ''And whet did he coy"
''He said they We're immense Chi.
cago Mail.
II never could understand, NJ,
Nidehat, why i. is they call your part
Of the county the 'Woolly West"
'It wouldn't be any mystery, my dear
Miss Harlembridge, if you knew the
number of Eastern lambs sheared out
there. Troy Press.