davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
The Bile Of q Snake.

The heads Of most ot the ven omous
snakes. including the "rattl'rs,
bulge Just beyond the neck. With
out exception they have tangs. ei'her
ALWAYS erect or raised, and lad back
at will These fangs are long, sharp
pointed teeth, with IA hollow groove
running their entire length At the
root of each fang j. "a little bag OF
poison. Wneu the snake bites the
motion presses the poison sac andl's
contents how down through the hol-
low iu the tooth into the puncture or
wound The harmless little forked
tongue j. often spoken OF by the an
informed IA the snakes "siinger. VI
Now there is no propriety In the name,
~ the poisonous snakes do not sting
but bite, their victims. There II 40
creature. even II brought from foreign
countries where "rattlers' do not ex
1T. bat will halt aud tremble At tile
nrst warning -ound OF the rattle.
DR.. =. Weir Mitchell, with others,
has been making experiments with
the venom OF different serpents. lie
has found that, aside from It's poison
Gus qualities, it contains living germs
which have the power Of increasing
enormously fast. SO, you see, when
an nniuInl Is bitten. these tiny bits OF
life. entering with the poison, cause
harmful action TO begin almost mt
once. DIR. Mitchell has found that the
nervous center controlling the act OF
striking seems TO be in the spinal
cord. for If he would cut of a snakes
head. and then pinch It's tail, the
stump of its neck turned back aud
would have struck his haDi had he
been bold enough TO hold IT still.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
What a Woman Can Do.

She can come to con clusion without
the slightest trouble OF reasoning on
it. and no sane man can do that.
Six OF them can talk a. once and
get along first rate, and no two men
can do that.
She can safely stick fifty pins in her
dress while be is getting one Under
his thumb nail.
She i. as cool az a cucumber in half
a dozen tight dresses and skirts, while
a man will sweat and fums in one
loose shirt.
She can talk as sweet as peaches
and cream to woman she hates,
while two men would be punching
each others heads before they had
exchanged ten words.
She can throw q store with curve
that would be fortune to base ball
pitcher.
She can sharpen a lead pencil il
you give her plenty OF time and plen-
ty OF pencils.
She can dance all night in a pair OF
shoes two sizes too small for her and
enjoy every minute OF the time.
She can appreciate kiss from her
husband seventy years after the mar
riage ceremony is performed.
She can go to church and after
ward tell you what every woman IN
the congregation had on, and in some
rare Instances can give you a faint
idea OF what the text was.
She can walk half the night with q
collicky baby in her arms without
once expressing the desire OF murder
ing the infant.
She can do more in Il minute than
a man can do in an hour aud do II
better.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
A Preachers BIunder.

The startling mistake Of funeral
sermon preached over the wrong per
son occurred Ia this city recently
The good, Kind snd wrli-inteniioned
reverend doctor made the distressing
error of sp-aking the last words over
the wife aud mother Of the family III
stead OF the husband aud father.
whose corpse lay ia the caskrr lev
feet from him. while the sgobizeo
widow To whose virtues lac wa direct
ing the discourse was coniprlisd 70
sit I'm terrible SUSPENSE aud Iist 10
her own funeral sermon. WnAt must
have intensified her di-trrss aud add
ed 10 the grim complication Of tue
situation il the fact mat The lady is a
member of the eminent d5sine's
church. The preacher painted the
desolation Of bome without mother
and e1tollrd the lsdy's virtues la q
manner that, under lees painful cir
eumsfaucs.. must have been souie
satisfaction.
A well known friend Of the family
finally summoned up enough courage
TO arise aud explain in broken aud IN
distinct accents that the minister
should coufne his retnarks 10 Mr.
and not Mrs. Blank. The munster
who was in the midst Of bis discourse.
misunderstood the Interpolation, aud
therefore continued ali the more va
rsnseIy bis psnegyric. II was no use
trying 20 stop him nov, but alter the
peroration he looked into the COMM
and fell back. He had discovered his
mistake.-Los Angeles ExPrsss.
The teacher asked the class wherein
Law the difference in meaning between
the words 'sufficeDt" and "enoSgn.
Sufficient" ansSered Tommy u
when mother thinks It's tine that
stop eating pie; enough Is when
| think it is.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

A young lawyer, just starting III his
profession. hung out his sign IN IA
Connecticut town where there was
only one other lawyer, an aged Judge.
A close-Hste old fellow, thinking to
get legal advice for nothing, called
upon the young man, told him he
was very glad he had come TO town,
as the old Judge was getting superan-
nuated. aud then contrived IN II sort oil
a neighborly talk 10 get some legal
questions answered. Then thanking
the young man, he put on his hat and
was about TO leave. when the young
man asked him IL he should charge
the advice. for which the fee was five
dollars. The old fellow went into II
violent passion, and swore he never
would pay. The young lawyer told
him he wculd sue him IL he didn't.
So the old fellow went down TO see
the Judge, found him boeing In his
garden. aud said:
That Young scamp that'sjust come
into town. ! dropped in TO make a
ueighborly call OH him, and he charges
Inc FIVE dollars for legal advice.
Served you righ,, said the Judge;
you had 10 business to have gone to
him
But have | got to pay 1t, Judgef
"Of course you have.
well. then" said the man, Il sup
pose | must" and he started OIL.
Hold on laid the judge "aren't I
you going to pay mel'
What foTT'
For legal advice
What do you cbargeF
Ten dollars.
The result was that the old fello"
had to pay five doIlars TO the young
LAWYER and ten dollars TO the Old one.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

Preacher-"Youngm men should new
er 10 TO place where they would not
taks their sisters. Is there young
man in the audience who thinks he
may safely break this wise rule
(Young man under tue gallery STANDS
NM Preacher And what il the
place, my young friend, which you
think yourself justified in visiting
and yet which you would not think
of taking your sister, Young man
..Th. n. rher shOp sir
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
WANTS THE WEATHER STRAIGHT

Wonder et I'm foolish,
Cuz I'm growing old,
Not to think the winter .
Quite 30 mighty coldi
Ez 1t used to sting me,
Wen / WIZ kid,
Wen / waded snowdrifts,
Jest as daddy did.
DIiftin' over fences,
Startin' in the fall,
Stayin' thar till sprlngtime,-
Never'd thaw at all.
Ponds and rivers frozen,
Skatin' everywhere,
Wind a-blowin' fearful,
Nuff to raise yer hair.
Then ust ter like II,
Thought the tim es war great,
Took 1t like men s whiskey-
Nothin' only straight.
Want my weather stiddy,
Rather have IL strong,
Than to hev the March time
Last all winter long.
Ust ter like the snowtime
Better than thefall;
Ust ter hate the thawin' up
Wussest time er all.
Wonder ef I'm foolish,
Though I'm gettin' old;
But I'd trade this weather
Fer the stiddy cold.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
Stories Of Lawyers.

Fifteen wears ago Judge McSweeney
was a famous criminal lawyer oi
Southern Michigan. He was called
upon 10 defend young woman from
the charge OF having poisoned her
old husband. 1t was question OF
whether or not she had placed poison
i'm cake Of which the old man had
eaten. \ portion of the cake had
been analyzed by the chemist aud
found TO contain great deal OF deadly
poison. The chemist testified 10 this
in court. Other witnesses succeeded
i'm making a chain OF damning evi-
dence against the pretty young wild
ow.
The time came for the summing mp
speeches OF the attorneys. The prose
cutiou began and finished aud all
looked hopeless for the prisoner al
the bar Judge McSweeney, the only
speaker for the defense, arose amid
breathleSs silence The room was
crowded and all were listening. One
could almost hear the quiet, IL was SO
intense He began in low tone 10
sum up the evidence in defense OF
the prisoner. He had been allowed
an hour in which TO plead his side oi
the case. lie dealt with everything
but the cake 1t rested upon the
table iusr at his right hand, where II
mad stood during all the weary trial.
Thirty minutes passed and the people
were still motionless. charmed 10y TIE
sweet eloquence of the gruh old law
yer. Three-quarterso OF an hour passed
by, aud another ten minutes.
When the clock over the big desk
told him there were but five minutes
left. he reached his hand out TO the
cake, half OF which stood upon the
table. and broke uiT ragged chunk.
He held this in his hand aud between
sentences took great moutufuls of II.
During those five minutes he calmly
argued the case aud ate cake. liz
demolished more then half OF IL
Tia chemist had declared there
was enough poison in it 10 Kill hfty
men. The good people looked nj him
i'm amazrment add jurors tururd TO
each other and whispered McS"ee
ney wound up bis speech, took anoih-
er chunk OF cake aud walked quietly
from the court room eating 1t. lie
closed the door behind him, rem into
a small room close by and locked ihr
door. Two physicians stood rrhdI
with stomach pump, aud in ten
minutes the cake was al IN the slop
jar. The jury returned verdict oI
mot guilty without leaving the
| courtroom.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
He Got the Place.

Some time ago gentleman adver-
tised for AL office boy, aud requested
the applicant to write, tstins age
condItIou aud salary expected de
received many answers 10 that adVer-
tisement, but noue IS Interesting as
This one: I'm twelve years old. h
all orian. amt got no islher ana
amt got no motusr. lm boy.
uain't got no brother and l halnt got
nothiu'. Im all alone aud l got to yet
along. Beats everything now hard
times Is. | never see the llkes." That
boy got the position aud is doing
well.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

Fastidious Customer.-The last time
7 was here found hair in the soup.
Waiter-Dat's so, sab; but you ma
none dis time. / dun tuck 'em all out
before brung yer de soup.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

Tommy-Which is right-stuffin' or
dressin'f
Jimmy-It's dressin' when it's on
your plate, and stuffin' when you've
swallered it.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

WiIlis-You have a cold. Does It
trouble you muchs
Wallace-Yes. Every blamed iooi
| meet asks NE about IL.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

Nv son. observe the postage stamp
its usefulness depends upon its aoh-
ity to stick to one thing till it gets
there.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

A horse belonging to Wilbur DeD-
ui.oD, Of Clinton, did Sunday, DE
c-nOer a. Mr. D.DbisoD DOugbr the
morse thirteen yeaTr ugo-tnsn a hns
Jay and b-autiIui-payiDg good
sum for tile animal. lie Was hye
years old. sir. DeBBisOB made tue
pure ase ia hs rpriDg, aud worked
tu,. uoTse Oh the farm through the
summer, aud put bin ID ins stabi@ IN
early fail. b, did DOt use him again
uutIi ia. .OliowiDg spring. OD niLeb-
ing him TO tue wagon the horse Tan'
brraAlng the wagon AID doing con
,Iderauls damage. Mr. DeDnison re-
turned bin TO ths sable, where ne
Das been for the last twelve years,
until death put All eDd TO his career.
ar. Dsnnison placed large paddock
Oh the door, aud al DO titDe unlocked
il. tue horse being fed aud ~atered
through the mAnger. A citizen who
visited the place sunday morning says
the sDisnal's bo0fs lad grown 10 ABOUT
fifteen inches la Length. aud furnsd
uD AT tiI. tovs.-Hardford Tunes.
Mrs. Waybeck Young jim JunkeN
don't seem 10 amount 70 much since
he left college.
SIR. waybaek-So; yoc see his cob
lere education made him too smart to
so, k aud not smart -nougb TO get
along without work
He: Il think you love me. Am l
Il -i.r1-t
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

A cow died in Springfield, ohio'
from eating too many apples. WHICH
gave rise to some trouble in cider.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
Nj. S. HITESHEW.
THE
Farmers and the Public
AT MCMURRAN'S

You Will find cheap Pencil and Ink Tablets,
scratch Pads. Papers, Envelopes, Pens, Fen
holders. Rulers, Sponges, Pencil Erasers,
Black board krasers, Euameled Crayous,
Dust Crayons, stesl!te Crayons Exercise
Books, Composition Books, Day Books. Leu
gers, Record Books. Memorandum BOOKS
Composition Paper, Examination Paper, Le-
gal Gap, toolscup, Congress Note, blll Cap
Drawing Pads, Thumb Tacks, Fine Drawing
Pencils, Indelioie Pencils and extra Leads
AIDES, ask TO see Richards Stamping
i Pad for Ladies Fancy Work. with this
pad ou can do your stamping at home per.
ieclly without using powder, paint or mol
iron. No patterns To clean. Will last lor
wears. A child can transfer any picture
from a newspaper or magazine 10 Plush,
silk, Velvet, Glass. Celluloid, in fact any
material. For sale, with patterns. Come See
ELLEN WELSHANS.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
Furnishing Goods

of every description. We now have
our entire stock arranged and shall
be pleased to have you come in and
inspect it and see for yourselves the
honest and substantial value we give
for very little money. | now have
the most of my new stock in for the
winter, and would ask you to come in
and buy. Thanking all for their past
favors, / would ask continuance of
the same in the future.
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

He: Il think you love ne. Am !
rishtf'
She: "No, sir, you are left
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08
NOTIONS
Boots and Shoes
IN HATS

we have the latest styles and a full
supply of soft and stiff hats OF every
grade for men and boys. Our
Shepherdstown register. [volume] (Shepherdstown, Va. [W. Va.]) 1849-1955, 1894-02-08

suitable to the season, consisting OF
Fine Dress Goods, Cloths, Ginghams.
Muslims, Blankets, Comforts, &c. Also
full supply Of
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1894-09-19
HORSE HINTS.

Do not keep the hay over the stable, as the gases from the manurC and the breath of the animal will make it unwholcsomc.
 Keep your harness soft and clean, par ticularly the inside of the collar and sad dc, as the precipitation, if allowed to dry in, will cause irritation and produce gals.
 Kindness will do more than brutality. ThCrcforU do not use harsh language to your horse or lash, beat or kick him. Bear in mind that ho is very intelligent and sensitive. n willing servant and deserving of your kindcSt treatment and thought.
 Never allow your horse to stand on hot, fcrmCnting manurc, as this will soften the hoofs and bring on diseases of the feet. nor permit the old litter to lie under the manager, as the gases will taint his food and irritatc his lungs as well as his eyes
 Tho collar should fit closely, with suffi- cicnt space at the bottom to admit your hand. X collar too small ObstructS the brcathing. while one too largo will cramp and draw the shoulders into an unnatural position, thus obstruCting the circulation.
 Remember that horses arc I.adc vicious by cruel treatment; that n careless appli- cation of tho whip has blinded many horses; that murc fall from wcarincss than from any other cause, and that no animal should ever bc struck upon the head Massachusetts society For the Prevention of Cruelty tn Animals
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1894-09-19

UozsrSs,, uIacE, rough and ready straw will bc worn through the autumn In- deCd 1t Is not unusual tO sec thesc hats until holiday time
 Leather trimming, which was intro ducCd some years ago to n limited extent. is to be again brought out Some of thcso garnituras arc elegant in the cxtrcnc-
 With the rCturn of cooler days and the necessity for wraps of snme sort. the onor- nous bow of watCrCIl ribbon rcappears us n finish for the front of the outside gar mcnt.
 Thcrc arc new and stylish coat jackets of cloth in various shades of gray and brown. Thcsc have deep collar and cuffs of velvet, with flat pockets. Many of the latest coats arc cut quite on the fashion of those of gentlemen, with the exception of tho additional fullnCss at the skirts.
 Thcrc has been n good deal of effort to got out something radically new in tailor costume this season. Among tho novel ties to bc presented arc dresses with very narrOw breadths, each breadth pipcd or corded either with fancy woven cord or enc with n silk cover.-New York Ledger.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1894-09-19
PRESIDENTIAL PETTY.

George Washington was member of the Episcopal church and great believer in prayer.
 John Adams was Il CongrCgationalist and came of n long line of Puritan anccs- tors, but was very liberal in his views as to religion
 Thomas JefTcrson's ideas on religion arc difficult to classify. He was an admircr of the great Tom Paine, the agnostic, but believed in n futurc life.
 John Quincy Adams was Congrcga- tionalist, like his father, and wrote a hymn.
 Madison and Monroe were both Episco- Palians in good standing.
 Andrew Jackson was notoriously irrc- lia,i"uS in his early manhood and mature life After his retirement from tho prCsi- dcncy he became converted and joined the Pre>byt"rian church.
 Martin Van Burcn never made any re IigioUs prJlt>>ion. but was a man of ire pruachahic morality. William Henry Harrison was an Epis- | copalian of strong convictions, which pro vented him from fighting duels. Jchn Tyler was an Episcopalian. James k. Polk made no profession un- til he was on his dcathbcd, when a Metho- dist clergyman sprinkled him. Zachary Taylor didn't give the question any thought, hut meckly paid his wifc's l contributions to the Episcopal church. Taylor knew little about theology and | cared less.
 Willard Fillmore was a very quiet but piOus man, who affiliated with tho Bap- | lists
 Franklin Pierce was an Episcopal com municant
 James Buchanan was always pious, but | didn't join the church until after his re- tirCmCnt from the presidency, when he be came a Presbyterian. | Abraham Lincoln, according to Colonel | Bob IngcrsOll, was disciple of Voltaire, | but he expressed Christian convictions and was inclined tu spiritualism. Andrcw Johnson was not n member of any church, but tacit believer in Chris
 tianity- He was inclined to Mcthodism. l Ulysses S Grant was Methodist. Rutherford B. Hayes was n Methodist. James A. Garfield was a member of tho | Church of Christ or Campbcllite church, and once tried his hand at preaching. Chester A Arthur was an Episcopalian. Benjamin Harrison is n Presbyterian and attends church quite regularly. Grover Cleveland gets his supply of 1 Christian fOrtitudc from the Calvinistic fount also--Louisville Courier-JournaL
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1894-09-19
GLEANINGS.

Tea is cut every lO days the year round in Japan
 Nearly l.jOO. GOO rcnain unclaimed in tho New York savings hanks.
 Thcrc arc truck farms in New York city. ayers The Mail and ExpPss, which arO assessed at $IuO. ucU an aCrc.
 The regulations of the British puS;uiIicc rCquirc that every unsOund tooth shall la taken out of II mans head bcfurc he can bc employed
 At depth of l. GOO feet from the surface at Ithaca, \. E.. thCrC is n solid stratum nf rock salt of an excellent quality nearly 300 feet thick.
 A walking stick, formerly the property of Pontius Pilatc, iS advertised for sale in n hairdr'sscr's window in I-a BOurbOute, Paris, for C. 0uO francs.
 St. Helena. it is announced, is to he come n health resort. It is nearly SO years ago sinco the British government found that it would la for the benefit of its health tn send Napoleon thcrc.
 Br'ad eaters, rthnulugists say, an a mi nority in thr world. The Chinese rico caters, the pi,,;,'r Indian, with his roots, the Eskimo. with his fat generating hlub- her, clasp hands with the sca islanders in saying nay tu the hAh, d loaf.
 '.W"od's hotvl. one Cf the few rcmain. ing buildings in London that ar' a>>ociat- cd closely with harlrs Dickens, is about to bc demolished. In one suit of room: in the building Dickens passed through some of the many vicissitudcs of his life.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1894-09-19
THE GUEST CHAMBER.

A big, restful looking sleepy hollow should find a nook Tn the visitors room, even if the latest and most elegantly up holstered chairs must be excluded
 A good sized wardrobe is sure to be ap- preciated- At all events, have a generous supply of hooks in the closet. Some one has rightly put it, Living in ones trunk Is an abomination."
 Have a comfortable lounge or divan upon which the travel tired guest may nestle down amid a luxurious group of pillows for a short rest without tumblinp up the bed in the daytime.
 If you cannot introduce a desk into this apartment. fit up n table with stationery and writing cOnvcniences. Let 1t hold a plentiful supply of plotting paper, pens, ink, pencils, eraser and a couple of candle sticks
 There is such a varied choice in scrap baskets these days that this convenient ar ticle should not be overlooked. The visitor with neat tastes Is often at loss to dis. pose of scraps of paper. etc, that serve to clutter up the room. With a roomy baske; near by this bit of discomfort is guarded against.-New York Advertiser.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1894-09-19
Preserved Plums.

The following rulo is equally good for either d.::lISon or green gage plums, the damsoms being particularly nice to eat with meats: Mako the sirup for all the plums to he preserved at ono time, allowing :: pound of sugar to n pound of fruit and a gill of water to n pound of sugar. Boil for 10 minutes; then put ill the sirup only enough plums to fill two or three jars. Cook until they can easily be pierced with a straw; then can and put fresh fruit into the boiling sirup. If thcrc is any sirup left over from preserving the plums, put in enough sugar to make it jcll and cook a little longer. This makes a delicious jelly.
Waterbury evening Democrat., 1894-09-19
LII MAS OfI.Y BlNKs.
He Explains What His Position Is In the
 Household.

 He Explains What His Position Is In the
 Household.
 There is telephone in their resi- dence, and as it is used principally by Mrs. Binks and her friends it is perhaps natural that it should Dc identified sole ly with Mrs Binks, and that Mir. Binks well, MT. Binks answered when the bell rang few nights ago, and this is the conversation that took place: ''Hellor'
 "well?'
 ''Is this Mrs. Binls?"
 "No."
 "I mean is this Mrs. Binks' tele- phone?''
 No; it's the company's." Well, is this Mrs. Binks' house?" "I don't know. I'm beginning to think that perhaps it is. "
 "what?''
 "Ycs. guess it is Every one seems to think it is anyway.
 ''Is Mrs Binks' daughter there?' "No"
 "well, who is this?''
 "Oh, this is only Mrs. Binks' hus- band, the father of Mrs. Binks' daugh- ter, the man who lives in Mrs. Binks' house and occasionally drives Mrs. Binks' horses. She got him with the house. you know"
 "Oh, she didP'
 "Yes, she did"
 Trough on Mrs. Binks, isn't it?'' That telephone will probably be taken out of the house. -ExchanUe.