The record-union., 1894-08-25
ARTBMUs WARDS CHARGE.
He Led Comedian In Chains and Had
Fun With the PeoDIe

run with the People.
Daniel Setchell. the comedian, was at
one time playing an engagement at one
OF the theaters in Philadelphia Artemus
Ward and Setchell had been friends for
long time and had passed through
many laughable scenes together. One
summer during their vacation Ward
wished 10 visit his mother, living at that
Tune down East" and he conceived the
1dea OF driving there instead of going by
the usual railway and steamboat that had
become quite monotonous to him. Setch-
ell agreed to be his companion on the
trip, so after all business matters had
peen arranged they started on their
novel Journey with their 'shired horse
and buggy Nothing of importance
happened on their way out. Ward said
his time and attention We're taken up by
the morse. The beast desired to make the
pace and he did. The persuader WAS
useless and Ward was compelled to al
low the animal to get there when he
could. Alter two days and a night on
the road they arrived at the home OF
w ara mother. Some time was spent
there. They enjoyed every moment OF
the visit and were reluctant 10 leave
The happy place when the day came for
thelr departure. AS they We're to return
by the road they came they anticipated
dull time, and, of course, two such spirits
could not stand dullness at any time.
oetcheii was comedian of the stage as
we'll as on, and his facial expression was
unexcelled, ii not unequaled by any
actor of his day. He was stoutly buiit
man, inclined to corpulency, with full.
round, jolly face. just as the horse was
brought up and everything made ready
Tor thelr departure Setchell quietly said
to Ward:
Charley. Wards name was Charles
BroWne.I think / am crazy, and if you
don't want trouble with me you had bet
ter chain me on our down trip,D
All right" said Ward, .pve known
that fact for some time, and / wonld
really prefer 10 chain you, as the land
lords and barkeepers would then have
protection.p
:, Inc chaln was procured and slipped in
the carriage, no one knowing it was
tnere, and after leave-taking and many
good-pys as they mounted the wagon.
the return trip" was begun. The ride
was uneventful for some time At noon
they stopped for dinner at the Roadside
Inn, and Ward informed the landlord
OF his trends mental condition. Several
fuSllcS gathered round to have a look at
the IunatIc, but, with the exception of
few grlnaces and rolling of his ewes.
nothing startling occurred. Resuming
their Journey they found the road almost
deserted, and, OF course, no need Of ap-
plying the chain. Just at dusk thew ar
rived at the "tavern' where the niph1
would be spent. The chain was placed
on Setcheu. and Ward, carefully leading
MN, entered the house. Ward told the
landlord that his charge was harmless
except at times, but he coulu always tell
when the tit was coming on by his
changes OF countenance, which was at
times startling.
The landlord
noped he would not have a tit in his
mouse. In the early morning everybody
III the mouse was aroused by unearthly
yells coming from the supposed lunatic's
room. There was a general rush OF every
one, ana the proprietor, with pale face.
seemed terror-stricken. In short time
ward succeeded in quieting his COM
panion, ana the breakfast soon over, they
were preparing to leave the house. when
suddenly the lunatic began again yelling
and distorting his features. Guests and
servants flew in dismay and the poor
landlord was almost paralyZed with fear.
"Do get him out, MIR. Ward,n he said.
never mind the bill, get him out, get
him out.o
Ward, of course. paid his bill, and at
last succeeded in getting his friend in the
buggy. 7
AS they were leaving, Ward said to
the landlord, I'VE will stop here on our
way back"
mo, you needn't" shouted the boni-
face, Il close this house for repairs to-
night"
Nothing further happened until they
came to a blacksmith's shop on the road
side. The chain was put on and they
stopped at the shop door without alieht-
ing. Ward called TO the blacksmith. re-
euestiDg drink of water for the i'm mbecile
at his side. The smith brought the spark
ling liquid in the usual stone Jug. and
SetchelI, after apparently taking a lonp
draught, with vacant stare, and to all an
pearance not knowing what he was do
ing, threw the contents of the Jug over
the big blacksmith.
The man retreated few steps, shaking
the water from his eyes, and then, raising
his huge arm, said, ''You're not as big a
fool as yon look, and I can lick the pair
of you," and started for them with ven
geance in his eye.
Ward was prepared, however for auy
emergency, and before the man could get
near enough to reach them, brought the
whip down on the horse with such yigor
that the poor beast with fright jumped
into run, fortunately for the occupants
of the vehicle.
The race continued for some distance.
but the horse succeeded at length in leav-
ing the pursuing smith too far behind to
be dangerous.
II think the happiest sight of nv life
was that enraged and painting blacksmith
standing at the bottom of the hill and We
at a safe distance at the top,u said Arte-
mus Ward.-To- Day.