The weekly intelligencer. [volume] (Lexington, Mo.) 1891-1901, 1894-11-10
ALWAYS A
Though Old as the Hills, the Disease +
zIcs Those Who Invent 1t.

Though Old as the Hills. the Disease Puz-
zIcs Those Who Haven't 1t.
The m~an-scrvant stuck his head into
the library, where the maid-servant
was going through the busting OPP
Grafton.
"Ain't it awful?' he asked.
'What?" she said CURLY, for it was
early, and in the morning the trigger
of the maid-servant's temper is deli
cate.
1.-THE way he's carrying on"
"Who's carrying on?"
"Mr. James"
whats the matter with Mr.. james,
asked the maid-servant sharply, for she
had been in the service of the family
longer than II m~an-servant, and she
resented any criticism on his part.
Hes SO queer" said the man-serv-
ant, lowering his tone to offset the
pitch of her voice, which had risen.
YOU'D better be careful of your
tongue" she said tartly.
But he does carry on So"
What business is it of yours?"
But he keeps me running all the
time, carrying letters"
''Of course he does, and IT'S very
proper of him"
But what's the use Of sending so
many?'
81 guess you were never in love-
said the m~aid-servant, scornfully.
This was a poser" for the man-serv-
ant, who did not respond at once
When he did speak again he assumed a
knowing air.
"Do You know" he said, ''that he
sends two letters n day-one in the
morning and the other as soon as he
comes home in the afternoon? That
is, two regular"
"Of course l know"
How do you know?" said the man.
servant in a contradictory tone.
"~Stupid!" said the maid-servant.
Don't see you running with the let
ters?''
The man-servant's head was thick,
for he asked a very foolish question.
"How do you know they're for her?''
Stupid" she said again, do You
suppose I'd think he was writing two
letters a day to his stableman?"
The man-servant made no reply to
this.
Amt it queer, though?' he said.
whats queer about it?"
why, he writes them in his dress
ing gown. Can't wait to dress, even,
and then hurries me off as if / was go
ing to send in a fire-alarm."
"Well?''
"And have tn wait for an answer
and bring it back to him.
"Of course you do" said the maid
servant. what does he send you for?''
And when / get back he's still in
his dressing-gown. He's been o nerv-
GUS and excited to dress. He just
snatches the letter out of my hand and
rips it open rs if his life depended on
it."
o curse he does" said the maid
servant in a superior way, showing her
knowledge of the manners of great
folk; "a gentleman is always anxious
to hear what a lady has to say"
But sometimes, said the man-serv.
ant in deep disgust, there's some
thing in the letter that he has to IN
swer right away again, and he sits
down and writes like a house a-fire and
then sends me boiling right back
again"
Probably because she's asked him
some question that needs an answer"
said the maid-servant approvingly.
But amt it mysterious" said the
man-servant, "how it affects emp
What business is that of yours?''
answered the maid-servant smartly.
1T makes me wonder" said the man.
servant. "Why, she only lives three
doors away. The idea of sending letters
to your fyansee when she lives right
next door to your house? And in the
morning, too, before breakfast, and as
o as you get home in the afternooni
Do they all do that?'
"How do l know what other people
do? Amt it enough to know what
Mr.. James does?"
"But it's so queer. Does every body
that's in love do that?'
"How do l know" asked the maid
servant, with a strong accent on the
'I;" I'm not in love with any body.
No, indeed, I'm not she insisted
mockingly.
But it's SO queer" said the man
INV. ooulCbiilcS lc > I'D lulDd-
tient-"
rs hat you, John?" came a voice
from the head of the stairs, and the
man-servant started and looked fright
ened. The maid-servant busted a fire.
shovel ~furiously.
"There!" she whispered, you've stood
here gossiping and wasting time, and
now you'll catch it. You'll drag me
into it, too"
us that you, john" came the voice
again, slightly impatient.
ANSWER him, you fool" whispered
the maid ervant in a tragic tone.
Yes, sir'' answered the man SER
want.
What kept you SO long? Come right
up stairs"
"l-l-haven't gone yet, sir" falter-
ed the man servant; I've been de-
layed, sir"
Haven't gone yet, said the voice i'm
establishment. What in the world
have You been doing. It's been half
an hour since | SEM YOU
I'm going right now, SIR" said the
man servant.
"Hurry along, them" commanded the
voice, you are very slow, John"
"All right, SIR" said the man-ser-
want, briskly, and he turned to give
an eloquent glance to the maid-servant,
but she was still busting away energet-
ically.
"Ain't it awful" whispered the man
servant, but the maid servant shook
her busting cloth at him threaten
ingly.
Hurry up, You stupid" she said,
and that was all the comment she had
to make on the man-servant's mystery.
N. Y. Tribune.