The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1894-11-09
THE DEMON UMBRELLA


restaurant of the Astor house-the
place where you feel as if you are
down cellar in the pyramid of Cheops,
and where you can look out of a sub
terranean window across n stone
crypt, which promises mummies, into
that garish courtyard, the Rotunda,
and catch glance of n mural camel
and have the Egyptian idea further
realized.
"Odd notion you have" said Hart
ley while we were waiting for coffee.
that OF carrying the poorest umbrel-
la in New York"
My umbrella was poor, but 1t was not
altogether my fault. | explained 10
him that a few mornings before q
thoughtless gentleman, name and
present address unknown, had mad
vertently walked off with my hat and
umbrella while | was being served in
barber shop, leaving behind his own,
the hat Il season in the rear of the god
dess Fash on, and with Il red lining in
it, and the umbrella somewhat bat
tered and bulgy. A messenger boy
brought me new hat, but the UNI
brella | took along. II believe" l
continued "that I'll throw that UNI
brella away tonight and get new
one in the morning" A bright idea
struck me- "I'll leave it right here"
! said and | tucked it behind the
steam radiator, unseen of any.
The dinner was soon over and we
rose and started out. l had forgotten
about the umbrella. l heard a quick
step behind me and looked around.
"Ah, re shentleman forgeets hees um-
brella!" exclaimed the waiter, and
with n grand flourish he held out the
the shabby wreck in all its horror. I
took 1t and we walked out.
did you see the pretty girl who
was dining with that old boy on the
left smiling at your umbrella?" asked
Hartley. l had observed that smile.
"Come up with me-" l said. "I'll
leave it in the elevated car-no trouble
about leaving an umbrella there-I've
left two there during the last year."
Il can't do it," replied Hartley, who
is employed on morning paper. Il
shall be late tonight. Besides, I
couldn't imperil my social standing
by walking with man who was
carrying such an umbrella. Better
jab 1t in the first ash can you come
to-"
made no reply to this bit of peas
antry and walked Off, carrying the
umbrella at modified parade rest.
At Park place l took the elevated. In
side l sat down next kindly ap-
pearing old gentleman, who was read
ing the Evening Post. AS we swung
in under the steady glow Of the great
Judson memorial cross he folded his
paper carefully, apparently with the
intention Of getting it bound, took off
his gold-rimmed eyeglasses, smacked
inS ba ipfal1nat,,o1 Irn nh
had been satisfactory, and said:
Pardon me, but can you inform me
where l can find the lost and found
bureau of the elevated roads"
Down in the neighborhOod Of
Morris street." l answered.
''Ah, indeed-thank you. l left my
umbrella in the train this morning
and | must look it up tomorrow"
"You may find it there" l said en-
couragingly, ''rhe place Is upstairs.
A blond young man with a puckered
mouth will meet you and after taking
down a minute description of your
umbrella, together with the exact
minute of the loss, and the road,
train, car. seat and station where 1t
occurred, he will! retire into a sort of
an umbrella library, where he has
about 1000 of them arranged and
catalogued on shelves, and look the
matter up"
you have had the experience" OBJ
served the kindly old gentleman.
MANY times" l returned careless
ly. Il usually have one or two on
deposit there" I had slipped the an
cient specimen | was carrying over
next TO- the window, and was leaning
forward so AS to hide it. Twenty
third streetw shouted the guard.
rose and started back hastily. / felt
my heart beating as l approached the
door Then came the voice of the old
gentleman Here, herer' he called,
sharply; you've forgotten your um-
brella.' | turned and took it from
his hand. Game near increasing
your account with the road, eh?' and
the old reprobate chuckled as he sank
back in his seat. ''Step llvelyI' bel
lowed the guard. / turned and ran
out; the gate smote my heel as I
reached the platform. An elevated
guard should have had no trouble in
dispOsing of the remarkable Mr..
Achilles.
| stopped at the news stand on nv
way out and bought an evening pa
per Hi. there, boss" said the por-
ter, 'you's leavin' yo' umbrella" T
picked it up and fled down the
stairs.
| hurried through Twenty-thrd
street, clutching the handle OF the
umbrella, and turned the corner and
started up Broadway. | had not gone
far when barber's sign caught my
eye This is my chance" | thought
to myself 81 got the accursed thing
in barber shop and there will I
leave it." | went in and was soon
having my hair cut, though the oper-
alton was not demanded. There is
something soothing about BARRIERS
chair; 1t cOnduces to calm, dlspassion-
ate thought; with an opportune hair
cut Caesar might or might not have
plunged impetuously across the Rubi-
con. | saw that had so far been act
Ing with too great haste. Instead of
reasoning out course and following
1t ! had been rushing blndly along,
nd ftslv .flvvT III.