The Washington times., 1894-08-19

keep out the dust. On the center table. which
was stained to look Just like walnut, was
big family Bible bound in prismatic hues.
On top Of 1t was a red and blue plush photo
graph album with tin clasps, and on top OF
this was beauteous cluster OF paper flowers
covered with glass case, around which was
wound red chenille. On little stand be-
tween the front windows were several sea
shells and memenro OF the Washington
Monument from the nearest brickyard. Over
In the corner was melodion with yellow
keys, with a kerosene lamp on one bracket
and picture OF a policeman on the other
Above this was worsted sign, God Bless
Our Home
Joe took his seat on the extreme edge OF a
chair, rested his feet on the rungs tilted 1t
against the wall, and showed his hands into
his pockets in the most homelike way.
90 Col. Struthers, Mamie-Mamie, Col.
Struthers, said the lendlady, introducing the
belle OF the block. Miss Mamie smiled the
usual smole and said the usual saying. Miss
Mamie's hair was of that radiant hue which
might have been produced by the blending of
an anarchist flag with locomotive headlight.
Her bright eyes gazed at each other over her
nose. while one seemed to be climbing the
north pole and the other to be promenading
the equator. All Of her front teeth which
were not already out might be removed at
will. Her love for the sunlight OF heaven was
told by the freckles on her hands. But when
Mamie is led TO the altar she will be described
in the Society Chronicle as one of the most
noted bellies OF the District.
REMEMBEREp THE COLONEL.
"After meteorological prefacs, Miss
Mamie said 4 reckon I've seen you before,
Col. Struthers. We met that time that Mrs.
Senator Byseat gave the progressive tiddledy-
winks soiree in honor of Mrs. Justice Fixem,
Mrs. Congressman Tawke, and Mrs. Police
man O'Klub. Mrs. President Cleveland and
Mrs. Contractor Digup were there. You were
carrying on a tete-a-tete Irritation with the
Mulligan GIRL
"'Who; What! yelled Mamies mamma,
writhing in as great frenzy as il she had
stepped on the soft corn OF a trolley, that low,
oDery Mulligan girl? Why, that girls grand
father used to hunt grease for your papas soap
foctory. What, that nobody at the Mrs.sena-
tor Byseat's soreear; impossible, my, but
what's this world coming to-
"Of course, l pretended to know all these
distinguished people, for it meant social
death not to know them.
Then Miss Mamie began to pipe sweetly:
Col. Struthers do you like grand concert
operaF In a voice that led me to think she
was about to tomahawk me for theatsr tick
cts and champagne supper.
"'Well, you bet,' said l. i 60 it strong on
symphonies and psalms, oratories and
hymns.
".well, don't you like that duet whieh.Gilds
sings all by herself in the maccaroni act of
Speghetti's operatta Of 'VermacellI. ~
II said, yes
AZ don't think there is anything SO grand
as vocal solo played by the whole orchestra
In the opening finale of a song and dance
oratorio. unless it might be the way the left
end OF the band saws catgut and the right
felders turn in a general alarm on the eym-
balls and knock holes in the bass drum when
Leonora sings double in the Toreadore's
scene of Sousas 'Sonnambuia," where Lean
der gets pinched by the mermaid, Semerimas
passes in her checks, santuzza throws up the
sponge, and Mephisto goes to Ayernus.
Il said, Certainly
"'Joer shouted the gentle hostess, take
that there jug and chase the duck, so that
Col. Struthers may have some refreshment'
.Then / asked Miss Mamie 10 play and
sing. She said she was a little out Of prac-
lice, did not play without her notes. had a
bad cold. and that the organ hadn't been oiled
for some time.
HAD ALL KINDS on TOP.
"'Do you like operatic music or classical
Col. Struthers?' asked the dear girl
my tastes. And then she began to
sing OF bicycle built for two. Her singing
was worthy not only the attention of all those
present. but also of all those several squares
rom present. She could make the leap from |
Rocked in the Cradle of the Deep to Up in |
Balloon Boys without whistling down brakes. |
slowing up for grade crossings. getting red in |
he face. or bursting a blood-vessel. 1t was |
IN Eifel Tower Auto-piano of eight octaves |
.andle-power.
"Of course l asked her to sing again, which |
she continued to do.
I'VE talked Of those things which are so |
in society, but which it would be |
waste of time to tell OF. / remained with |
ny friends till the cars stopped running and |
hen homewardly l walked my weary way.
thoroughly pleased with my entire into |
Washington society.
Washington society is fully equal in my |
stimation 10 that at Winnemueca. Skull |
iulch, Skeleton Ranch. Riprib Ridge, and |
'ther metropolises of nv native heath.
Yes, don't care if l 10. Straight, please. |
'ame here. Ne, too"