davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning call., 1894-07-05
At rs Cents.
At SO Cents.

Silk and Wool Novelty Effects. re-
duced before to 81 % and 81, now 75c.
The morning call., 1894-07-05

$50 LADIES' JACKETS. in Black.
Tan or Brown, Fine Broadclo b or
Cashmere, tailor made. with handsome
buttons.
Worth from SIP to SIT so.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
NEVER OUTDONE.

The disposition of Americans to eX-
aggerate is especially prominent in
what is known as American humor.
A story associated with picket firing"
during the civil war brings out this
feature of national character.
One day there was truce between
the two hostile picket lines.
"Ho. Yank ~ called out a lanE Mis-
sissippian, who had just been posted.
Can YOU fellows shoot -
oval, Johnny, guess we can, some.
Can your
'Shoot ~ shouted back the Confed-
crate. "Why, down in Mississippi we
knock q humble bee off a thistle blow
at 300 yards"
"Oh, that's nothin' to the way we
shoot up in Varmont | belonged to
a company up Their of II hundred men,
and every week we used to go out to
practice The cap'n would draw us
up in single file, and set u cider barrel
rollin' down hill. Each man took a
shoot at the bunghole as it turned up.
This barrel was then examined. and
if there was a shot found that didn't
go into the bunghole the man that
fired it was expelled. / belonged to
the company ten years and there amt
been nobody expelled yet"
The exaggeration is often so pro
nounced as to eclipse the humor. a
Californian hearing Il Brazilian tell of
the wonderful tireflies of his country,
so large and luminous that ladies wore
them on their persons inclosed in
gauze, replied:
That's nothin'. Why, in Californy
the fireflies are SO large that they use
them to cook by. They set the kittles
on their hinder legs, which are bent
for the purpose like pothooks, and
their bodies give out heat enough to
boil potatoes
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
THEY FOUGHT FOR 1T.

Arising out of the stoppage in the
coal trade, says an English paper, a
capital story is worth repeating con-
corning Lord Derby and collier
Wandering on some land belonging to
Earl Derby, the collier there CHANGED
to meet the owner of Knowsley face
to face. His lordship inquired if the
collier knew he was walking on his
land.
"Thy land? Well, I've got no land
myself was the reply, land I'm like
to walk on somebody's. Wheer did
tha' get it fro'?''
oh" explained his lordship. 81
got it from my ancestors.
AN wheer did they get it fro'?"
querried the collier.
They got it from their ancestors"
was the reply.
An wheer did their ancestors get
it fro'?"
"They fought for it,
"WelI, bedad,n said the collier,
squaring up to the noble earl, ''I'll
feight thee for it!''
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
VARIETIES.

Some years ago there lived in
Perth, Scotland, man of convivial
habits, well-known by his Christian
name, Jamie. One dark night an ac-
uuaintance found Jamie lying at the
foot of an outside stair is that you,
jaime - asked the acquaintance, in
voice of the greatest astonishment.
ave, it's me-" replied Jamie, in a.
tone of complete resignation. Have
you fa'en doom the stair ~ was the,
next question. AYE fell doom but
l was comm doom, whether or no."
There is more benefit in good laugh
than in all the hot water remedies,
faith cures, cold water, electric, and
all other newfangled treatments in
the world, and it does not cost any
thing Laugh. If you know nothing
else to laugh at, laugh at your neigh
Dor, for he is probably improving his
health by laughing at you.
Bessie had just finished her break
fast as papa stopped to kiss her before
going down town. The little one
gravely took up her napkin and WHIP
ed her cheek. What. Bessie said
her father, "wiping away papa's kiss?"
"Oh, no." said she, looking up with a
sweet smile. Use wubbing it in"
An old lady who claimd ito know
all about it, says the only way to pre-
vent steamboat explosions is to make
engineers bile their water on shore
In her opinion ''all the Dustin is done
by cooking the steam on board the
boat
DO not hurt the feelings of others
by saying sharp. sarcastic things. 1t
is better to dispense with that ques-
tionable reputation of being smart
than merit one of cruelty.
DO you think, 4" said Willie Wish
ington, ''that it actually hurts man
to be hit with one of Cupid's arrows?"
No" replied Belle Pepperton. "As
rule, he merely becomes senseless
for time.n
The world is sadly in need of an
invention that will warn people when
they have talked enough.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
OTERDID III.

Yes" said the statesman, Il de-
feated myself by my own eloquence
once"
"How was that?''
81 was Il candidate for the nomina-
ton for Congress, and | got up and
made IL speech to tile convention in
which l just naturally flung Old
Glory, with capital . and "a capital
& TO the breeze i'll so enthusiastic a
manner that ! took the house by
storm. / dilated on the greatness of
our country and on the responsible
ties of the man who should be called
to make her laws till one old fellow
from Il back county got up and said
that | had convinced him that it was
too big u job for as young a man as
was to tackle, so he moved that the
convention nominate a man of more
experience, and, by gee, they did it.
Since then | have sorter held myself
in check"
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
TRANSPORTATION OF SOULS.

Dr. Edward Bedloe came over from
Philadelphia one night and sat there
in entertaining q choice group of
friends with tales of the far east. In
the edge of the group sat a man from
PENNSYLVANIA. who had come over
from Pottsville on some government
contracting business. He was all ears
and eagerness. His name was Strauss.
Finally the restraint became too in
tense, and he broke loose.
''Toctor,' said he, what is dot new
relichun heers off about China ? Ny
wife has got it ferry bad, und | don't
understand it,
Tell me the name" said Bedloe.
ut is Mohanmedanism Buddhism,
Shintoism, Taoism, Confucianism or
what ?"
ooh, it is no isms, but der name is
like a tramps migrashun of der soul,
ain'd it -
"Oh, you doubtless mean transmit
grafton of the SOUL
yah, dots it. You dell lie about
dotn
Certainly. TRANSPORTATION of the
soul is very pretty poetic doctrine of
metempsychosis which our friends of
the Theosophical society have borrow
ed from the far east
Here, here, toctor Tell me vot
dot means, so | can understand what
you vos talking aboud."
"All right, I'll tell you in plain Ian
guage Take yourself. for instance.
You live to the allotted age of three
score years and ten, and then you pass
away Your soul goes into the body
of a bird-a canary, we'll say-and
from your gilded cage you fill a lady's
boudoir with the melody, living a life
of luxury and fed from the dainty
fingers of beauty
"Oh, dot is beautiful, beautiful! |
like dot ~
"And then you die again, and your
soul goes into lovely flower in a gar
den, AMI you fill all the air with fra
GRANGE and delight the eye with your
exquisite color and delicacy of petals. "
"Ah, dot is fine! l like dot re-
lichun."
LAS | was saying when you inter
rupted me, you live the life of a flower,
until one day donkey gets into the
garden, and attracted by your lowell
ness he eats you, and your soul passes
into the donkey
yah, yah"
when some former acquaintance
comes along, strokes your long ears
and says: Why, Stauss, is it you
How little you have changed ~
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
HOLDING COURT IN THE BACK
WOODS.

In Mississippi there used to be a
county where it was almost impossi-
BILE to hold court. The lawless back
woods element would come into the
county seat and break it up, said an
attorney of that State. Judge Clarke
once went there to hold court. The
first day he had a bucket of water
poured over him from chimney hole
in the roof and several pistol shots
were fired in the court room. The
next day as he opened court he laid two
large pistols on the desk and at the
first sign of disturbance leveled the
pistol at the man and conducted him
to jail After that there was no more
disturbance and the better element of
the community were anxious that he
should return the next term, but he
declined with a sentence that has
passed into political proverb in
Mississippi L regard my coming into
this country as an adventure, l re-
gard my leaving it as an escape"
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
ONE OF THE BEST.

1.-The best compliment ever had,"
said well known lawyer the other
day. was paid by an old lady in an
adjacent town, where l once went to
take part in Fourth of July celebra
ton. | was young man and always
awaited myself of every chance got to
spout. That day | was ON the pro-
gramme to read the Declaration of In
dependence, and 1 put all the power l
had into the lines
when the exercises were over, an
old lady, who was arrayed in her fin
est, came up TO me and said, That is
one of the best declarations of indie
pendence | ever heard; you must have
spent powerful long time writing
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
a Year in advance.
2netica1.
COUNTING IPPLSEEEDS.

COUNTING IPPLSEEEDS
Beside the hearth one winter night
Made rosy by the great logs light,
That flaming up the chimney dark,
Lit every Granny, every nook,
Upon the rug little maid
Sat cnrled, in pose demure and staid.
In pensive mood, with dreamy eyes
She sits, while up the chimney flies
A thought with every fiery spark
Glinting and flashing through the dark,
Till with Il sight profound and deep
She moves, as one moves i'll her sleep.
A rosy apple in her hand
A weight of thought seems to demand.
She taps it with a finger light,
Then carefully she takes a bite,
Another bite, now one, now two
The core is thus exposed to view.
Another sigh what can it be
My little maid that aileth thee?
All what is this some incarnation?
Muttered with such Federation?
Hank as each seed her bright eyes see,
These are the words that come to me:
zone love, two 1 love
Three love, say!
Four | love with all my heart,
Five-I cast away"
Here Il tear rolls brightly down,
What secret she has won?
Who can say! But just behind
Sounds voice so soft and kind:
Look again. Thou must indeed
Find for me another seed ~
Roster her bright cheeks glow
In the firelight's rudy glow,
Sure enough a culprit seed,
Finds she in the core indeed
From thy lips l fain would hear
What the sixth one means, my dear"
SIX he loves" she murmured low,
And the firelight's Pickering glow,
Two happy faces now disclose
With checks ALLOWING like the rose.
But here Wen let the curtain fall
For the end is best of all.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
Electric Bitters.

This remedy is becoming so well known and
so popular as to need no special mention. All
who have used Electric Ijtters sing the same
song of praise. a purer medicine does not eX-
ist and il is guaranteed to do all that is claim
ed. Electric Bitters will cure all diseases of
the Liver and Kidneys, will remove Pimples,
Bos Salt Rheum and other affections caused
by impure blood. viii drive Malaria from the
system and prevent as well as cure all Malar-
ial feyers For cure of Headache, Constipa-
ton and Indigestion try Electric Bitters. En-
tire satisfaction guaranteed, or money refund
ed. Price Soc and 90 per bottle at DR.. w,
S. Richardson 4 Sons Drug Store.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
DRY GOODS.
1874.
New Year!
New Advertisement

We have just finished tax
ing STOCK and will place on
tables in centre of room all the
"odds and ends that we have
found through our stock.
These goods we have deter
mined to sell; they are not
damaged, but will be sold AT
HALF THEIR VALUE
This pays us better than keep
ing them until they become
damaged, and it will pay you
to buy them. y
100 pairs Ladies', Misses and
Children's Shoes, some of them
a little shop worn. You can
buy them at just one-half their
value. They are broken lines,
we have not all the sizes in
them, but will sell you any
pair we have at JUST ONE
HALF THEIR VALUE.
We have about 20 Ladies'
Long Coats that sold at from
S. to SIP. You can buy them
at from $3.50 to $500. Also
a lot of Children's Coats at ST.
to $1.50.
1t will save you money and
get you some good bargains if
you will call on
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
NOTICE TO CREDITORS


THIS Is TO GIVE NOTiCE.-That the SUBJ
l. scriber has obtained from the Register of
Wills of Hartford county, Md, Letters of Ad-
mnistration on the estate of
WESLEY HARRIS,
late of Hartford Co., deceased. All persons
having claims against said deceased are here
by notified to exhibit the same with the legal
vouchers thereof,
On or Before the 10Th day of Sept, 1894,
or they may otherwise by law be excluded
from all benefits of said estate. All persons
indebted to said estate are requested to make
immediate payment.
Given under my hand and seal this 9th day
of March, 1894.
CHAS. w. MICHAEL,
23mh Administrator.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
And HOUSEKEEPING.

They say when man goes to trad
ing horses he can no longer be honest
at least in respect of horses, and yet
''they say" may be mistaken. At
least it occurred to me so one day as,
riding along pleasant road, met a
man on horseback
Want to buy horse?' he inquir-
ed.
what do you want for him?' said
1.-TWO hundred dollars" said he.
What do you ask for him?n said 1.
zone hundred and seventy five
dollars" said he.
What will you take for him?''
said |.
One hundred and fifty dollars
said he.
What will you get for him?" said I.
Zone hundred and twenty-five dol
lars" said he.
What did you give for him?" said
zone hundred dollars" said he.
what is he worth?" said |.
''Seventy-five dollars" said he. 81
re ,kon you don't want to buy a horse,
mister" and he rode into the yard of
big establishment l could see
through the trees.
Whats that building?' l asked of
a man hundred yards further on.
"Lunatic asylum" he replied curt
ly, and | steered in the other direc-
ton.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.

FTNHIS Is TO GIVE NOTICE-That the sub
Il scribers have obtained from the Register of
Wills of Hartford county, Nd, Letters of Ad-
ministration on the estate of
JOSEPH GORRELL,
late of Hartford county, deceased. All persons
having claims against said deceased are hereby
notified to exhibit the same with the legal
vouchers thereof,
On or Before the 18th day of Sept 1894,
or they may otherwise by law be excluded from
all benefits of said estate. All persons indebted
to said estate are requested to make immediate
payment.
Given under cur hands and seals this 18th
day of March, 1894.
FRANK E. GORRELL,
EFFIE NJ. GORRELL,
16mh Administrators.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06

"Josar," said Mrs. Corntossel,
'ithese remarks bout scientific cookin
is mighty puzzlin'."
Il reckon, replied her husband.
zone person says that fish hain't fit
ter eat another says We orient ter tech
meat, an another declares tibet bread
is mighty onwholesOme."
Motions nowadays is mighty new
tangled"
But it explains suthin ter me.
With our ancestors subsistin' on i'm
proper diet all these years, an lett.n'
of their constitutions run down, it amt
no wonder tibet we raise some dudes. -
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06

THIS Is TO GIVE NOTICE-That the SUBJ
i scribers have obtained from the Register of
Wills of Hartford county, Nd, Letters of Ad-
miniStration on the estate of
WILLIAM T. SHAY,
late OF Hartford county, deceased. All per-
sons having claims against said deceased are
hereby notified to exhibit the same with the
legal vouchers thereof,
On or before the 9t:, day of Sept, 1894,
or they may otherwise by law be excluded
from all benefits of said estate All persons in
debted TO said estate are requested to make i'm
mediate payment.
Given under our hands and seals this 9th day
of March, 1894.
ELLA Nj. SHAY.
JAMES r. WALKER,
16mh Administrators.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.

THIS Is TO GIVE NOTICE.-That the sub
l. scriber has obtained from the Register of
Wills of Hartford county, Md, Letters of Ad-
ministration on the estate of
ANN DAVIS,
late of Hartford Co., deceased. All persons
having claims against said deceased are hereby
notified to exhibit the same with the legal
vouchers thereof,
On or Before the 9th day of Sept, 1894,
or they may otherwise by law be excluded
from all benefits of said estate. All persons
indebted to said estate are requested to make
immediate payment.
Given under my hand and seal this 18th
day of February, 1894.
JAMES b. DAVIS.
9mh Administrator.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06

-"How is your father coming on?'
asked Colonel Yerger of a darby he
used to own before the war. He am
deadr' He must have reached an
advanced age" He did dat, for a
fac. He was libin' up to the berry
day OBJ his deff.n
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
NEGRO LOGIC.

| 1t was just before the war Squire
Johnson had been to Nashville, and on
| his return home brought "Ole Nose, y
the favorite slave on the plantation, a
new hat. Nose was very proud of it.
The next Sunday the squire was driv-
ing home from church with his family,
| and the carriage overlook Nose and
his ''ole miss trudging along afoot.
1t was raining slightly, and the squire
noticed that Nose was bareheaded
and was carefully protecting his new
hat with his coat.
why don't you wear your new hat
Mose?" inquire the squire. You'll
get that old head of yours wet"
Oats so, Mass Johnson replied
Nose, but dat ole heads yours and
de hats mine.n
The squire used to miss a chicken
now and then, and at length the mys-
ferrous disappearance was laid at the
door of one Ezekiel, who was accused
of the theft by his master.
Leke was darby of exceptional
wit. He had picked up a little arith-
metic and prided himself on his acute
ness. When charged with the chicken
taking he asked warily:
Now, MarSe johnson, if | can show
you dat | only TUX dem fowls for y0h
good, will you let me go jus dis timer"
The squire was curious to hear his
defense and told him he would do So
well, you say you paid nine hun
dred dollars for me, and | weighs JUS
bout a hundred and fifty pounds
Dat makes six dollars a pound. Now,
if turn yoh chicken meat dat amt
wutf noah dan ten cents pound into
niger meat dat's wuff six dollars yoh
JUS dat much better off. Don't you
see?''
Of course the squire saw, and he
used often to repeat the story and
laugh at the darky's ingenuity.
The war came on and Zeke was one
day detailed off the plantation to help
throw up some earthworks. The
enemy observed the defense prepare
tions and began to shell the place
The first missiles went wide of the
mark, but after a few rounds the
range was found more accurately and
the shells began to burs t uncomforta-
bly, close to Ezekiel.
He stood his ground as long as he
could, but at last dropped his shovel
and ran for his life. The officer in
charge of the operations met him a
little distance down the road and, halt
ing him, ordered him to explain his
flight. Zeke was trembling with
fright, but found breath to say:
"Dey's shooting over dare, and Mars
johnson he's poh man. He paid
nine hundred dollars for me in Mem
phis and he can't afford to have HE
killed. And with that he took to
the woods.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
THE SOUTHERN NEGRo,S"JACK.n

One Of the first questions asked by
County Physician Wilder when the
body of Dallas Stowe, the negro, was
found hanging by grapevine in the
woods near town, was: where's his
'iack'?" At this question the negro
audience fell back as if getting away
from a bomb that was about to ex-
plode. What do you mean by his
jack p asked one of the white men
present, land why this commotion %
"Wait, and l will show you," said the
doctor. He then felt in the pockets of
the dead negro and brought out tin
box. He opened it, and it was found
to contain a snakes head, scorpion,
piece of iron, a rusty key, a bunch
of ''witch's yarn" and an ounce of
salt. 'This,n said the doctor, lis the
jack. Eight out of ten negroes carry
them. With it they 'conjure' their
enemies, throw spell over them, and
the average negro holds the jack in
mortal dread. To show you their fear
of it, just offer any negro here dollar
to put this box in his pocket" The
offer was made, but no one would
touch it. Dr. Wilder brought the box
to the city and tried the darkies on it,
but not one of them could be induced
to touch it. The doctor has hung this
jack in his back yard, and says that
the turkeys, chickens, and woodpile
are safe for the winter.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06

THIS Is TO GIVE NOTICE-That the sub
Il scriber has obtained from the Register of
Wills of Hartford county, Md, Letters of Admin
istration on the estate of
a. LINGAN JARRETT,
late of Hartford county, deceased. All persons
having claims against said deceased are here
by notified to exhibit the same with the legal
vouchers thereof,
On or Before the 9th day of March, 1895,
CT they may otherwise by law be excluded
from all benefits of said estate. All persons
indebted to said estate are requested to make
immediate payment.
Given under my hand and seal this 9th day
of March, 1891.
SALLIE C. JONES,
16mh Administrative.
The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1894-04-06
LEGAL NOTICES.
WILLARD G. ROUSE, Solicitor.


ORDER NISI.
The Hartford IN National T. tno c,ro,,,t conrt
Robert i. Hanna Hartford County.
and others. III Equity.
ORDERED, this Goth day of March, 1897,
~ that the sales made and reported in the
above entitled cause by William Ii. Bayless,
Trustee be finally confirmed, unless cause to
the contrary thereof be shown on or before
the 23d day of May, 1891; provided, copy of
this order be inserted in some newspaper pub
lshed in Hartford county, once in each of three
t3) successive weeks before the 23d day of
May, 1894.
The report states the amount Of sales to be
$500. -
WIN. S. FORWOOD, JR., Clerk.
True copy, test, ,,
NOTICE TO CREDITORS.
TNHIS Is TO GIVE NOTICE-That the sub
L scrbers have obtained from the Register of
Wills of Hartford county, Md, Letters Tesla
mentary on the estate of
ELI TURNER,
late of Hartford county, deceased. Ali persons
having claims against said deceased are hereby
notified to exhibit the same with the legal
vouchers thereof,
On Before the 18th day of Sept, 1894.
or they may otherwise by law be excluded
from all benefits of said estate. All persons
indebted to said estate are requested to make
immediate payment.
Given under our hands and seals this 10th
day of March. 1891.
MARY E. TURNER,
FRANK T. TURNER,
23mh Executors.