The Atlanta constitution. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1885-19??, 1894-11-05
Improbable Cow-a story in scrip;urai st,l


Unprofitable Cow-A Story in scrip:ural style
From The National Stocl,rnan.
And when he casteth ~ his accounts at
the end Of the year. behold. The balance was
on the wrong side And It was a big bal
ancc.
Now. whcn ne lookcth at the figures ana
s-eth hoH much he hath lost IN dairy, he
sayeth unto his wife: verify. vile thou
have to patch Up my clothes fer another
year. for / have not the WhereWithal with
which 10 buy a new suit
ANA his wife rcplycth and saEcth: 10
scpa. tina. does not sUit m at all; cVery
year thou tellcst me ;hat the acXt year p
new suit viii be bought and thou suggest II
not. L have patched up thine old salt Untu
il is i'm many places foul-ply. Thy coat IS
like unto thy namesall. =, for II L. 81 many
coiors. Thy pants are aot 50 stylish as
those worn last spring bE oUr Pc.EnDor 3
scarecrow; as ror thy vcst, oijst tEou not
have to search for it dhiaenTiy whom that
Ungodly boy whom thou caught stealing
apples. told lhce 10 pull il down."
And he answered il was precisely as she
had said.
Then spake up the Grst-born ana said unto
his father: Father why doSt thou not sell
these kline that DO not pay and only keep
the good ones? About half of our herd are
not paying anything themselves, nor will
they let the majority pay anything, for they
eat M all the prolits.
They are like unto the minority in the
United States senate only the kline eat
while the senators talk.
why not put III" cloturc on them and
close them OUT at once?
''Our ncghbor sayeth 20 me today that ne
will lend us his Babcock tester. and with
that w can tell which are the 1Iibusterers
IN the herd and We can get rid Of them and
tacn have a quorum Of working kline
And the old man sayeth: Let i# be as
thou wilt"
Then his Grstborn goeta straightway 20
his neghbor 40 get the tester
Now. this neighbor had a daughter, and
she and this young man had ben, in the
language of the country. Keeping company
for some time SO he tarryech Ions and il
was late when he cometh hone.
Tho next day the kline We're tested and
about half Of them were found to be I'm
profitable. the per cent o. Ia in the milk OF
some Of them being SO small that it strain
eth the tester to record il.
And the old man sayeth: what shall w
do with the Improbable kline; they are NOT
fat enough for beef and no one viii buy
them for the purpose OF milking th-m.'
Then saycth his frst-born: We VIII sell
them for whatever the butcher viii pay. for
il were better to make compost of them
than to attempt TO fatten them
so ne driyeth them to the man who sell
eth meat ana getteth for some Of them very
lttle money. but for the lot he receiveth q
sum which enabled him 10 buy some rich
feed, and this feed he giveth unto the good
kline.
And when another year passeth the old
man again casteth up his accounts and this
time the balance was on the right side, and
il was q good balance too.
Then h. s2yoth unto his wife: This year
] VIII not diSappoiut thee. for ] viii buy
tn,c a new dress and the sleeves thereof
verify, they SHAH cont2in more cloth than
thy whole dress used to contain.
Thou hast been a faithful hclpmate unto
me. and houcctorth thy lot viii be mach
Ileasanter than il hath been iE The past.
Thou shalt not spend thy evenings with
a pile of darned stockings ana nevermore
viii / ask thee to reshiuele my pants"
And ne embraced his Wife ana i,aprintcth
q kiss on her uithcred cheek.
Then he turneth to sp.al. unto his first
born, but, 10. hc had depaytod End was al
that instant in the hallway Of his neighber
and ne embraooth his Eejghbor's daughter
and imprinteth a number of kisses. Yea.
many score, on her cheek. and teilcth her
that things were ut last on the b.ilce at his
house. and soon he hopeth to-but Just then
som" one apnroacheth and they hy apart
suddenly, ana as he hangeth Up his hat
she saycth: 1t looks like it might rain.