Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1894-02-10
WIT AND HUN0R.
STILL KICKING.

Kansas City Times
Barber-Shamnoo sir? Bald-heade5
Customer-W hat with-hy poisong
Indianapolis Journal.
Peastraw-How is your niece LOOKING
these DAYS? Barnes-Just the same AZ
usual-for man.-Harper's Basar.
Bees were created before flies. Other.
wise the fly would have been the
symbol of industry. - Cincinnati
Tribune.
so he made night OF it and his
employer found it out. What was the
resultp" "It's all day with him.
7. Press.
Some foreign variations Of "Chcago'
-Zizzazo, Jagjapo, Hipaho, Scheecha-
cho, Hizago, and Chachico.-M T.
Recorder.
Cinnamon, says reformed mission.
airy, dislike water as drink. Kentucky
to China, "Yo' hand, sah!"-M tnneap5-
lis Journal.
Mrs. Neighbob-Why do you call
Jack The Fisherman? Jess Because
he never goes away without smack
N y. Times.
The report that the Boston walters
have concluded to strike against tips
must be taken cum barrelo Sails
Memphis AUaiaHche.
There is no excuse in the world for
the STORY with a moral" If moral
is of any use it doesn't need anything
to lean against Washington Nel0S
DE law" says Uncle Nose, "am
mighty brickle thing. Whenebber
man takes it inter his own hands he
am sho' to break it,. "-LadianapoiiS
Journal.
"Why is it that people are always
talking about the dollars OF our dad
dies'?" Because they're the easiest
to get hold of, presume" Detroit
Tribune.
A boy with three hands has been
born out West. What an admirable
Fourth assistant Postmaster-General
he would make If he were n few years
older. st. LOUIS Republic.
She-Tou mean to say that, knowing
YOU are in debt on every side, you have
the sodacity to pay me marked atten-
tiou? He--Yes At is the only thing
can pay T. Herald.
West Virginia boasts of two-headed
woman who has two distinctly diff
ferent voices, bass and tenor She can
make the other girls in the house think
there is man aOout.-NetO Orleans
PicayatRe.
Hicks-I guess I'm square with Dix,
| gave his boy mouth organ last
night Mrs. Hicks-But you're not
square with me. Mrs. Dix sent him
over here to spend the day PittSJarg
Dispatch
Silver-plated bedsteads are the latest
fad of the rich. Many man VINO
sleeps on one would trade it for the
shuck mattress of his youth if that
would bring back the slumber of those
days. Minneapolis Tribune.
Neyergo 11:30 p. m. Well, de-
clare, the clock has stopped What
could have made il? Miss Tiredout
Cwearily) 30, l don't know. Even
machinery gets discouraged at times,
l suppose. -BuGaio Courier.
Hungry Higgins-It you had to work
-jist had TO -wot sort o job would
you like best? Weary Watkins-Weu,
think drivin' load O. hay over new
asphalt street would suit me middlin'
well. > Indianapolis Journal
va as, v-a-as, used to know him,
you know But he is still in the
city" "Pwaps But he isn't in ouah
set" "Why, what did he do?" Got
out Of debt and seemed pawsitiyely
pwoud of it, Washington Star.
"Old Workaudslaye took his first
day of in fifteen years recently"
How'd he happen to do ftp" went
to a funeral" Never heard of his do
ing such thing before" "He never
did. The funeral was his own%-
Btfalo Courier.
man was seen loating about
building that was being painted at
Belfast, Maine, recently. When asked
If he wanted a job he said that he was
only waiting for the men to be paid off,
as he wanted to borrow dollar
Philadelphia Ledger.
The common gnat has $50 times as
much wing surface per unit OF weight
as the Australian crane which weighs
5'OOO.OOO times more than the gnat
does. And when it comes to general
pestterousness the gnat can beat the
plaques OF Egypt r. augusta (Ga.)
Chronicle.
Lady (severely)-You say you work
when You can get it. | don't believe
you have earned an honest dollar in
month. Applicant for charity (humb-
lD-fou're right, ma'am. NV wages
for the last two weeks | worked was
paid in silver. That's the reason !
quit -Butaio Courier.
New City Editor at telephone, calls
up Brooklyn Police Headquarters
Hello. What's the latest item? Head
quarters-S. O. T. Editor-What in
thunder's S. O. r.? Haadauarters-
Same old thing. Editor - Explain
yourself. Headquarters - Another
trolley car accident.-N r. Times.
Doctor Now, here is bottle of fine
whisky and | want you to take table
spoon Of it every morning before
breakfast Patient-Doc, I'm in the
habit Of taking about mules ear full
OF the stuff at exactly that time of the
dHy. = fbis gp19pf,.1 e., ba ,I,lal -