The Wichita daily eagle., 1894-01-30
The qMhla gaty Eagle gue aay or,rug ganuary 50, 1884

uOuOly u0I0CcreSLluSs duu uoouA &Ay
people don't enjoy me; and then como
home and brood over 1t, and it really
seems as If everybody were laughing
| at me. and get as blue asindigo"
eyes you're right" said the doctor;
SITS an aggravated case of morbid self
centeredness; but if you take this
Golden Remedy every time You get to
thinking about yourself, and take large
doses of it when you are in company,
you'll be cured as sure as fate"
! The young man looked incredulous
as he took his little giltbox and his
departure. and went his way.
'Oh. doctorl' said the next. q poor
| little dressnaker with so sad q voice
that the black cat again retired to the
sofa. I'm so blue! WhenI get through
| my work and sit alone in my little
room evenings, feel SO lonely I'd most
| like to kill myself I haven't a rela-
ton or a friend in all the town, and it's
something dreadful to have no one to
welcome you home-nobody to tell
things to, nobody to say good night or
morning to you. Why, sometimes I
kiss my own arm. feel SO desperately
lopelyr' and she burst into tears.
poor thingl poor thing.' said the
doctor, in cheerful voice. as If he
were saying: Fine day! fine day! Wen
| FIX you up. Now, my dear. just follow
the directions in this little gilt box
whenever you begin to feel lonely; and
take a specially large dose in the even.
| ing when you come home from work. I"
The young girl smiled feeble little
smile as she thanked him for the box
and left the room.
What in the world is the matter
with you?' inquired the doctor of his
next patient, an elegantly -attired
young man, who looked as sleek and
| a well-fed, well-curried horse.
I'm bored to DEATH" drawled the
| young fellow. 81 was so bored with
balls and parties and racing and cards
and shooting and theaters and every
| thing else in that line, it was positively
relief to wake up one morning and
find l had tho blues; for it was a new
sensation. But I've had them SO long
now, I'm bored with them, too, and
I've come here to get cured"
"Well," said the doctor, looking at
him through his magnifying-glass till
the young man actually blushed, you'll
find my remedy SO hard to follow it
will be like drawing teeth; but l can
assure you it will be new sensation
and ifyou stick to it it will cure even
you."'
''Ill take it at any price," said this
afflicted representative of boredom.
No price," said the doctor, except
secrecy. The remedy does no good if
anyone else learns that you are trying
it for such purpose"
The young man signed the bond, and
departed with more animated express
sion on his blase countenance, and
small gilt box in his pocket
The next arrival was an invalid in
| rolling chair. Her pale face beamed
with pleasure.
"Oh, hol So you're back! Remedy
don't work?" said the doctor, knowing
better.
II should think it did work." she an
swered, graveiy. You know how
long the days were as l lay in my bed
or sat in this chair, kn owing | could
| never take step. and brooding over
every ache and pain. Well, now the
days are not half long enough to do all
/ want. The remedy has given me SO
much to do, and made life entirely diff
ferent to me. How can l thank you,
doctor?"
"Pshaw, child" said the good man.
don't thank me. It's the remedy.
Keep it up; just keep it up"
Next came a very Notwithstanding
young woman, who had obtained de-
gree from university. She complained
that through all the studying to which
she devoted her life for the cultivation
of her mind, there ran an undertone
of melancholy which, whenever she
stopped work, eliminated in an attack
of the blues.
AS usual, the doctor dispatched her
with his universal prescription, and
also the other half dozen patients who
called that afternoon. One was a man
made miserable by his own selfish
jealousy of any attention paid his wife.
Another got the blues because she was
SO discontented with her humdrum,
monotonous life, being kept at home
by an invalid sister when she wanted
to study music in Germany.
So they came, rich and poor, young
and old, no class in society seeming to
be exempt from this miserable ailment,
and each departed thankful for the
Great Golden Remedy.
At last the clock struck six, and the
doctor closed his Office door and settled
himself comfortably by the fire. The
black cat jumped up in his lap, and the
doctor took one of the mysterious lit
tie boxes from the table. As he, in an
absent-minded way, removed the cover,
little paper futtered out. Not pill
nor powder was to pe seen, and the
Great Golden Remedy consisted only of
the little paper, on which We're printed
in golden letters these words:
WHENEVER YOU ARE FEELING BLUE,
SOMETHING FOR SOME ONE ELSE GO DO.
How silly people arc!' said the doe
tor to himself. They travel miles to
get here, take no end of trouble, sign
that bond and all that nonsense just
to get what they could have learned
from the Book of the Great Physician
just as well as | did Just because the
idea is dressed up in poor rhyme and
gilt box, and there's mystery about
it, and it's the fashion to come here,
the Blues cure is a bowling success.
and all the world is running after my
Great Golden Remedy" And the black
cat switched her tail and said amen,
as well as she knew how.-N. Y. Inde-
nap1en.