Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1894-11-22

ALL defaultlng cashier wants to
enable him to get along Is a good
start. News.
WHETHER it will knock Fitzsim-
mons out or not. Corbett's late { e.
fort is violent blow. -PhiladelIhia
Times.
BUNco JIM-"How much did Pete
get on those diamonds he stole last
night?" Steerer Bob-sThirty days. /"
-Yonkers Statesman
DRAsIATIsT-"This joke Is meant
to hit the big theater hat" Player
st will go over the heads of the
audience. Detroit Tribune.
KA~HARINE-He's such an attract
i've man, isn't he? Janet-I should
say so. He can draw larger check
than any man In town. detroit Free
Press.
TEAcHER-"What do you suppose
Jonah thought when he found him
self inside the whale?" Johnny
@Bed closed up on him. ID etroit
Tribune.
HAYES wonder why Brown sold
the watch dog he used to blow about
so much? Jackson-A tramp stole
! the chain the dog was tied to-New
York Sun.
"How Is your candidate running
now?" "First-class. The sheriff is
only ten yards behind him, and he's
making fine race!"-Atlanta Con-
stitutiOn.
JAPAN says she proposes to de-
molish China" said Mr.. Blykins.
"She ought to have our servant girl, 4"
replied his wife, YEARLY. Atlanta
Constitution.
"WHAT do you think? Dick said
was the prettiest girl at the recep-
tion." Think? Why the sooner he
consults an oculist the better. >
Spare Moments.
LITTLE ETHEL-"Dottie Dimples is
the luckiest little girl l know" lit
tie Johnny-"Why SOP" Little Ethel
1.-THE only brother she has Is growed
up Good News
HASN'T Miss Warbell beautiful
voice, thought" Il should say so.
Why, verify believe she could get
dianapolis Journal.
Miss RosEBUD-"This is my first
season, and mamma says | may get
married If 1 want to-" Miss Oldum--
She'll say more than that after this
year "-Harper's Balar.
THERE'S bonnet" said the
editors wife, shat 10 perfect
poem. yes" he replied, absent
mindedly, shut we never pay for
poetry. Washington Star.
CoRoNER-"You swear positively
that you were not to blame for the
mans death?" DR.. Tyro (haughtily)-
Certainly, sir; they did not call me
soon enough. buffalo Courier.
| MAN rejoices in doing good, but
the thrill OF exultation rarely strikes
the fellow who, in an exuberant
NON nt gives his last nickel to the
church. -Cleve and Plain Dealer.
SUBsCRIBER-I've got something
here l want you to make note OF.
Editor mindedly)-Cau't do
il; three in the bank now and one
gone to protest-Atlanta Consti-
tuition.
Mrs. QUERIE-I understand you
had narrow escape coming across?
Mr. Hard Port-Yes, indeed; the coal
ran out and the captain had to split
the ships log to keep the fires going.
Truth.
JILsoN says IL people who complain
because base motives are at the bot
tom Of so many things would stop
and think they would remember that
is where base motives belong. Buff
falo Courier.
ELDER BERRY-"Did the natives Of
Central Africa give you a warm re-
ception?" Returned Missionary
"Yes, indeed; they were so tickled to
see me that they wanted to eat me
up."-Gossip
PARKER uses great deal of
cologne, it seems to me. Awful bad
] form!" said Hawkins. at would be
in you," said Hicks, slut it's family
pride with Parker. He comes of old
colonial stock. Bazaar
ais 1T true that Houser Is hustling
for the postofiice?" Guess it is. 1
heard his wife tell him if he didn't
get her letter mailed inside of twen-
ty minutes she'd know the reason
why. Buffalo Courier.
A BosToN chiropodist says that too
short or otherwise ill-fitt.rg hosiery
causes more corns than toots and
shoes. This comes under the head
of wisdom learned at the -ee5 of 9TH
ers. Philadelphia Ledger
FATHER = "Are your prospects
good?' Suitor-"Well, sii; ): were
married to your daughtey I can say
that l wouldn't exchange them for
those Of any young man Of my ac-
Quaintance. Harlem Life.
BAcoN-"I knew that man Carr
would make his way to the front"
Egbert-"And has hep" "Why, yes:
he started as conductor on the
Fourth avenue cars, and now he's a
driver. "-Yonkeys Statesman.
PRISONER sentenced for ten days.
What would We do IL Oh said We was
an ould fule? Judge-You would
get ten days more for contempt
Prisoner-Thin, begorra, Oil not say
it-Orll only think it.-New York
Herald.