Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1894-06-15
PITH AND POINT.7

| own CASTLES Ill the nlr.-GalveBton
News.
The man who is standing up for You
soon gets tired and sits down.-Atchi-
son Globe.
A man is like gas-jet. The moro
he blows the less light he gives out
Boston Transcript.
Woman may be the weaker vessel, hut
it's always the husband that's broke.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
GLOW do you manage to live in this
dead town." "Fine; Pm tho under
iaker. "-Atlanta Constitution.
Generally the more nimless boy is
the better he likes to run around with
a shotgun. -Binghamton Republican.
Marie-"Is that young Deroudy
very fast?" Cnra-"Ycs, in every
thing except thinking FREQ Press
Dude-"My ancestnws came ovah III
the AInyfower, don't you know"
Bluff-"As ballast ?"--Detroit Free
Press.
THAT changes the complexion of
things" unused Wigwag, MS he gaze
on his wife's dressing case. Philade.-
phia Record.
'"rhis is liigh-handcd outrage" as
the boy remarked when he found that
his mother had put the cookies OH the
upper shelf. -Siftings.
Only reason why it is often difficult
to find IL runaway team is that the
horse usually takes the traces with
him. Lowell Courier
Unsuccessful persons excuse them
selves by saying they are better adapt
cd Tor some other business than their
own.-Philadelphin Call.
1t is great day in boys life when
he gets TO be big enough so that for
the first time his mother doesn't cut
his hair. Boston Courier.
"What do YOU call that great clumsy
dog Of yours Conductor for?" CHATS
it; because he is always knocking down
something. boston Commercial Bull
lctin.
Tenant -''That house OF yours is in
terrible condition. 1t isn't fit for
pigs to 1.-Two in" Landlord" And
you are therefore going to move?"-
Boston Transcript
Once in very great while YOU meet
n man who owns Il dog, and who doesn't
think that he is really tho most re-
marknble dog, by Jove, that ever lived.
-Somerville Journal.
Are the Millers pleasant neigh
bors?' "Well, should say so. They
know something disagreeable abont
almost every one of their acounint-
ances Inter Ocean.
Papa, said Johnny Snaggs. "WelJ.
johnny" "What is miracle, papa?''
"Wcii, Johnny, it is n miracle when 1
geta seat in the street cur. "-Pittsburg
Chronicle-Telcgraph.
In many instances the man who
spends his life waiting for his ship to
come i'll wastes his time, because he
originally omitted to send any ship
out Milwaukee journal.
cts the pleasant things that one is
always expected to give up during
Lent, isn't it?" eyes, of course. -
Come and sec me every day, dear,
won't ?"-Inter- Ocean.
First Deacon (criticisins MINISTRY
well, if Mr.. Hardtext isn't very
interesting, he nj least doesn't slop
over" Second Deacon -"No; he is
too dry for that. "-Texas Sittings.
She (reading)-'T see that Mt n re-
cent military wedding the bride cut
the cake with her fathers sword" He
"a very suitable implement, proba-
bly,, if she made it. New York Times.
What in the mischief is that fellow
doing in that red hot incubator9n
Hush that's n magazine poet filling
an order for July poem in the mid.
die of January l'-Atlanta Constitu-
ton.
People don't die very often over
here, do they?" inquired the smart
New Yorker. No, only once re-
piled the Philadelphian. And there
was an intense silence. -Philadelphia
Record.
The sooner man finds that he Inns
not the capacity to know even one
thing thoroughly, the more general
and reliable information ne will begin
to accumulate concerning the world in
general. milwaukee Journal.
Tommy Nav, 1 wish you would
get paw to sell out this house and move
sommers else" Mrs. Fisg-" why, my
ch'ld? Tommy There amt no
more dogs around in this ncighbor-
hood for Towser TO lick. He's got 'em
all scared most to death. ''-Indinn-
apolis Journal.
ClerlI-.This is called the bureau
trunk, and thilik will suit Won exact.
ly II" Customcr-sIt can't bio
hxcd so that you would have TO unpncls
1t clear to the bottom if you'd put tho
wrong things in first?" Clcrk--"No,
no; every tray ia acpnrntc. :" We'll,
1t wouldn't suit; it's for my wife. -