The midland journal., 1894-01-19


suffer.
Can you not lend me an umbrella?"
he asked; but my new owner shook his
head.
"You never brought back the last
one" he replied.
"Never mind" said the visitor; "give
me one and I'll bring them both back
together"
Il don't have one," said my owner.
"Why, what is that in the corner?"
'Oh, had forgotten; but that is
very valuable one paid twenty-five
shillings for it last week"
st will do very well," said the gen.
tleman, seizing hold of me. He prom
ised to bring or send me back next day,
but a week passed, and every evening
found him strutting along the pier
with me in his right hand. Late one
afternoon, however. when he was in
his workshop liking another pipe, the
student came to the door and said
that he wanted his umbrellas. Then
the gentleman received him hospita-
bly,, but declared that he had taken
back both umbrellas three days before.
So solemnly did he insist on this that
the other knew not what to say and
went off in daze.
The next man knew was introduced
to me, So to speak, by his wife. My
owner had taken me to dinner party,
and was in the umbrella stand when
two of the company left They were
the first to go. and saw at once that
they were husband and wife The
gentleman was taking his own UNI
brella fl lom the stand (for he was weak
minded) when the lady handed me to
him saying: "This is much better
one" Thus it was that again changed
owners. From this house was taken
by the first gentleman that called, but
he lost me on the way. He went by
rail, and another gentleman in the car
riage left, taking me with him. He
was the gentleman who had me in his
hand when we walked home from
soiree with young ladies. Three of
them he told (but at different times)
that he loved them passionately, but
could not afford to marry; and they all
promised to be sisters to him, which
pleased him vastly more, think, than
if they had promised to marry him.
He left me at the outside of his door
one day because 1 was very wet, and
there was found by policeman, who
took me in charge and ran me into the
police station. The magistrate picked
me out as the best of six and took me
home, where lay for a week, when 1
was distracted from the stand by
town councillor.
He took me, the next day, to meet
ing of his friends, when there was talk
of presenting something to an Irish
statesman, and at first thought they
were to present me to him, but it turned
out to be something else This town
councillor l heard boasting that he
never carried any but the best UNI
brellas, and he also boasted that he had
not bought an umbrella since he was
sixteen years of age. councillor took
me away from the council chamber.
and had a rim of silver put around me
with his name and address on it, for"
he said, ''if you do not take some pre-
caution you are sure to lose your UNI
brella, the public are so careless or dis
honest" In his possession l remained
for nearly a month, but one day he
took me to a club, and had not been
in the stand for more than five minutes
when a lawyer came out, and selecting
me with care walked away with me.
He took the silver rim off with his
pocketknife. and then carried me off
to shop, where he instructed the shop.
man to put band around me saying
that l was presented to John Smith,
Esq, by his affectionate son-in-law,
June "a, 1889. My new owner was the
man who abused me because once was
open was reluctant TO shut, for now
l had become somewhat stiff Once
he was in such a rage at me that
he hit me savagely against the hat
stand, and that was how my first rib
was broken so badly.
was saved from this man by an
elderly lady, who took me away be-
meath her waterproof thinking should
do for an Office umbrella for her son.
When they discovered, however, that
the rib was in two and that was spot
ted with holes, they ragged together at
the old gentleman for owning such an
umbrella. was kept at the office un-
til one of the clerks fell over me and
broke two more ribs. My owner now
OccIdreu C1dL naQ DceQ an aQm1ra bic
new umbrella when he bought me the
week before, and the unhappy young
man had to give him another where
upon he got me as gift. was sorry
for him, for he told his master that the
new umbrella had cost him fifteen shil-
lings. but soon discovered that he had
picked it out of the stand at q doctors
house. He tried to mend me with a
boot lace, but my appearance was now
hopelessly plebeian, and heard him
tell his sister. who lived with him. that
he was really ashamed to be seen on
the street with me.
One day our door stood wide open,
and SO did the door that was only sep
arated from ours by an iron railing; SO
she took me into the next house and
left me in the umbrella stand there,
taking away a new umbrella in ex-
change. 1t is in this house am lying
now. They offered me to the milkman
and the postman, but neither would
have me; so was carried contemptu-
ously into the closet, where now lie
j. NJ. Barrie, in Two of Them