The Coeur d'Alene press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1892-1907, 1894-01-20
ONCE WAS ENOUGH.
III. Mcswat Mako. An Invasioa Into shs
Lower Regions.

II. Mesw., Mak.- An Invasles Into the
Lower Regions
"Harki What's that."
Mira McSwat sat bolt upright in bed and
listened.
"Billigerl'' she exclaimed in horse whis-
per, shaking her snoring husband. Il hear
. noise!'
"Wh-wh-what' Wheres" said Mr.. Nc
Swat, waking with jerk. N'What's the
matter. Lobelia,"
"'Shl Listen, There 1t Is again! It's
down stairs. Billiger. there's somebody in
the house,
Billiger listened q moment
She WAS right
There was a noise down stairs-a shut
aing, stealthv kind OF noise. as il made by
somebody who was unacquainted with the
premises and had no business there
He rose and dressed himself by thrusting
his feet in pair of shippers and pulling on
. dressing gown. Then he lighted dark
lantern he had purchased for emergencies
Of this kind. armed himself with a patent
carpet stretcher-one of the deadliest weap-
ons known to science-and turned to his
wife.
'Lobelia, he whispered huskiiy, remain
here. You can do no good. will meet this
invader alone. But stay! II there should
be more than one" he continued, grinding
his teeth, land you hear me call out. you
may come to the top of the stairs and yell
Make all the noise you can IL will convey
the impression that we are expecting them
and are prepared"
With his dark lantern in one hand and
the deadly carpet stretcher in the other he
started slowly down the stairway, coughing
loudly as he went
Mrs. NcSwat listened with painful eager
ness, She could hear Billiger rasping his
terrible weapon against the balustrade and
coughing with a violence that increased
every moment.
Presently the noises ceased II was evil
dent that Billiger was searching the house
with view to slipping upon the marauders
unawares.
Then there came wild yell
Without waiting to assure herself wheth-
er it came from Biiliger or the burglars
Mrs. McSwat seized chair. ran to the head
OF the stairs, screamed with all her might,
tumbled the chair down to the fioor below,
rushed back for the washbowl and pitcher.
sent them flying after the chair and hurled
down broom, another chair, a small trunk,
bootjack and several other articles Of a
portable nature that stood or lay within
teacn, ner voice ringing out all the time in
series Of wild, blood curdling shrieks
While the din was at its height Mr.. Bill
ger McSwat appeared at the foot Of the
stairs.
"Lobeliar' he shouted. lodging niinbly
as towel rack flew past his head, what
on earth do you mean by this Internal rack
eti You've broken 800 worth Of furniture
and reused the ghborhood, The police
and the fire department will be here II you
don't STOP
Wasn't there any burglar. Billigerf"
asked Mrs. McSwat
Burglar" snorted Billiger, climbing
over the ruins in the hallway and bounding
up the stairs three steps at a time Bur
glar! No. IL was only the cat Didn't
you hear it screech when kicked it out Of
the parlor' Burglar he exclaimed con
temptuously, throwing the patent carpet
stretcher under the bureau, extinguishing
the dark lantern and crawling between the
sheets again "Lobeiia, if you hear any
more burglars or thieves or robbers in this
house tonight and wake me up again there's
going to be trouble, madam Go to bedr'
And all the rest of the long, weary night
Lobelia lay abed, wide awake, and listened
to the deep, regular, ceaseless snoring OF
Mr. Blillger McSwat.-Chicago Tribune