The Opelousas courier., 1894-12-08
HE WAS DECEIVED.
The Signal Service Played d Mean Trick
and Left Him i'm the Cold.

The Signal Service Played d Mean Trick
and Left Him in the Cold.
He stood at the corner of Woodward
and Michigan the other day
when the wind came down off Lake st.
Clair with a cold edge to it. He was
leaning on a little rattan cane until it
described a half circle under the pres
sure. He had on an ethereal-looking
white straw hat and a light summer
suit, and his general appearance was
fairly hit off by a newsboy when he
cried out:
"All you fellers come on and see a
gum-drop walkin' around on his hind
legs
The gum-drop shivered as he posed.
1t was fall overcoat weather, and he
was clad for 100 degrees in the shade.
Very embarrassing to be caught up
this way, doncher knaw??' he ex-
planned to the onlookers in a weary
way. Its all the fault Of the signal
Office, doncher see? Predicted a hot
wave, be-Gawge. and it failed to mate
rialize. Came down from me suburban
domicile prepared for a sultry day. and
UItSS HE l1cdTt IL L ildVcu I hCdi1S pSl-
ished with cold, We knaw.'
"See him shivepUaeoiiodte q t.aans.
"Shivah. Of course I shivah.c' IL.
piled the weary man, as he INDUCED in
a shake. II am no volcano that l
shouldn't shivah under this sudden
change. Bless me. but I'll see the peo-
pie in the signal office and give 'em a bit
of me mind for this! Nevah depended
on their predictions befoh, and nevah
will again, doncher knaw.'
Here's your high pressure in the
Mississippi valley!.' shouted another
boy.
That's another point l wish to touch
IN, We knaw,' replied the gum-drop.
"What do I knaw about high pressure.
low pressure, increased cloudiness.
storm centers and all that? l see by
the report that it is to be warmer
doncher knaw!-much warmer-and
accordingly l prepare for the change.
In the language of the Greek | am ky
foshed-which means hat am left
boxed up-put in a hole, doncher
knaw!'
He shivered again-a first-class. high
toned shiver. such as a nabob might be
! proud of, and continued:
':When a fellah has his collah and
tie and rousers and hat to look out for
his mind is fully occupied, doncher see?
He cawn't be poking his nose into the
newspaper and increasing his burdens
by trying to understand what the sig
nal officer means by the Ohio valley,
low pressure, high pressure. humidity.
and all that. / wouldn't think of it,
you see-no fellah would think Of it.
1t is all owing to the ambiguity of the
signal officer that have been kyfoshed
done up-laid On the shelf, doncher
knaw?'
''Play us a chune wild yer teeth"
screamed a chunk of a bcotblack.
THE ideah of deceiving a fellah like
this!!'' continued the victim, as the
wind swept down Monroe avenue and
raised another crop of goose-pimples
on his legs. Il think l shall L for
damages, doncher see? l shall, no
doubt, be Frustrated by this exposure.
be-Gawge! and it's a question whether
my system will recovah from the
shock. If don't l may go off in a
week, doncher knaw? And if it does l
may lingah along for years, you see
lingah along such a shattered wreck
that no tailor can aver fit me trousers,
again, We knaw.:"
There goes another shiver,'' called
two or three boys in chorus as the thin
clad form was again agitated.
Certainly l shivah," he replied. Il
was waiting here to see d friend who
might lend me at overcoat, We knaw,
but he's been switched off, the same as
this hot wave. Me play is to proceed
homeward with all possible dispatch
and to imbibe some gin and watah,
and then write to the papahs that the
| signal bureau is a delusion, doncher
knaw? Be-Gawge! I'll quite break
up the business befoh l let go, doncher
see?'
And he lifted his little cane off the
ground and fioated up Woodward av-
enue like a man who would rest
until he had the signal officers scalp
at his belt.-Detroit Free Press.