davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
Could Not Talk n Little BIT.


1.-THE toughest experience ever had in
my life, said a solicitor of life insurance,
was with an iron manufacturer In Troy.
u had been informed that he was a
hard customer, but wealthy man and one
who had carelessly neglected to provide
himself with insurance, and SO l resolved
to tackle him.
Upon entering his office and explain
Ing the nature of my business was sur
prised at his greeting. 1t was friendly,
even cordial. Life insurance. said he.
We'll, now, that's subject that interests
me. Come with me to the shop. I've got
to go there, and you can tell me all about
tho superiority of your company over all
Others
"Then he took up his hat and bade me
follow him. As we went out of the office
noticed smile on tho faces of all the
clerks, and though didn't understand 1t
l smiled in return, for thought possibly
they knew my errand and were congratu-
lating me on my success.
''The proprietor walked hurriedly, and
after him, until at last he flung open
door. 1t was the machine shop The din
was terrible. A thousand hammers, l
think, were all at work beating iron at
once. Involuntarily put my hands to my
ears.
Hooking at my man, l saw his lips
move, and lowering my hands just man.
aged to catch his words, shouted above the
deafening racket, Now, tell me all about
itl'
"He smiled sardonically as he said this,
and l could have murdered him. 1t was
impossible to say word, and so l went
right out. 1t was darn mean trick -
New York Herald.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
HE WAS FROM PHILADELPHIA.
Unused to Travel on New York Cable Cars
the Quaker Raised Many Alarms.

Unused to Travel on New York Cable Cars,
the Quaker Raised Many Alarms.
The conductors of quite a number of
cable cars had observed him standing at
the corner of Cortlandt street, and two or
three had stopped on his signal to take
him aboard, but as he seemed to expect
the car to go to the curbstone for him
they had pulled the bell again in disgust.
Finally conductor stopped his car few
yards beyond the corner and patiently
waited until he made up his mind to risk
crossing Broadway to reach the car. He
had placed his gripsack on the platform
very carefully and was proceeding with
great deliberation to lift his foot to the
step when the conductor, his patience ex-
hausted, grabbed him with one hand and
pulled the bell with the other, giving him
yank that shot his grip into the far cor
ner of the car and landed him beside 1t.
Surprise at first mastered his indigna-
tion; but, the latter gradually asserting it,
self, he rose with as much dignity as he
could command and started toward the
rear end of the car to have it out with his
assailant. Just as he reached the middle
of the carryall, however, the grip had got
a fresh hold, and with it's characteristic
tremendously dropped him in the lap of
stout lady, who, refusing his apology,
iabbed him in the ribs with a package she
carried.
my dear madam, he gasped.
Don't talk to me, you blundering ele-
phant. If you don't know how to walk,
why don't you strap yourself down in the
oornerr'
o.. Iyn nc
ON his feet as the car speeded down the
incline toward Canal street, clinging to
tho window with apprehension written In
every line of his face.
1--WE shall all be killed' he cried to the
man sitting next to him.
''That's all right" responded the man
addressed Don't you alarm yourself.
They amt breaking any records on this
line, and he cheerfully resumed his paper.
When the curve was reached at Union
square, he rose, with n frightened cry. The
next moment he was flying from one end
of the car to tho other, buffeted from side
to side, until he landed in heap on the
rear platform, just as the car came to
standstill at Fifteenth street.
"Poiicel Police'' he yelled, and blue
coated protector, who had been helping a
hackman to hold up tree, responded to
the call and demanded to know the trou-
BILE.
ARREST that manl' cried the passenger.
81 demand his arrest for racing on a
public thoroughfare.
The officer looked at the conductor for
an explanation as the passenger jumped
down and placed his hand upon his shoul-
der for support. The conductor placidly
handed out the gripsack, winked know
ingly at the policeman and merely an
swered:
"That's all right. He's from Philadel-
phia. New York Herald.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
About Nursing Babies.

Under all circumstances it is better for
the mother if she is healthy to nurse her
own child, as more especially in the early
months it is of the greatest benefit to her
own constitution, and besides also knows
what and how much the child is getting
and that the milk is pure. 1t is well where
the mothers health will permit to nurse the
baby through the second summer if the
milk agrees with it as safeguard against
bowel affections which are so common at
that time.
Mothers with hereditary tendency tC
lung disease should not nurse their own
children, but have a strong and wholesome
wet nurse supply this place, and if one can
not be obtained the child should be fed
artifcially on cows milk.-Baby.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
Seth Sanders Religion.

Seth Sander kept a grocery store
AT Squashburg, state of Maine.
Wherein the thousand things were sold
That country stores contain
Molasses, Goldfish, cotton cloth,
Grindstones, lung balsam, shoes,
Ink, paper, mopsticks, sewing silk,
Mixed paints in reds and blues
Hoe handles, bonnets, pocketknives,
Salt mackerel, hats and caps,
Umbrellas, hair dye, wooden pals,
Wheel grease and ladies' wraps.
An absentminded chap was he,
And sometimes goods got low
Or ran completely out of stock
Ere he the fact did know.
Folks would ask for this and that
And Seth would say tor squeak,
"Jest abaeout all aeout;
Have some in next week."
So oft he had to use this phrase
1t got to be "A joke,
And everybody used to laugh
Whene'er the words he spoke.
But "Methody camp meeting" came,
And TO 1t people flocked
In numbers such that half the roads
With teams were fairly blocked.
The joke was quite forgot, and all
Tho townfolk staid away
To sing and shout and cry "Amene'
And one warm, sleepy day,
While Seth doZed idly in his store,
A solemn man passed through
The village and stepped stifiiy in
And slowly said, Have you
Religion got?" Seth, half awake.
Dan1ia.1 vii IA 60 mo old spnpQk
"Jest abaeout all aeout;
Have some in next week."
-Somerville Journal
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
What Women Demand.

The only idea of some people seems to be
as though no woman had ever done any
thing difficult or perplexing in her life,
and Just because she has gone to work and
accomplished something, they are taken
off their pins entirely. This is anything
but the right spirit in which to look at a
woman's work. There is no such fuss
made because a man has succeeded in farm
ing or poultry raising or stock breeding or
floral culture, but because woman mas
done these things there is no end to the
wearsome chatter which Is everywhere
thrust in our faces To give the woman
chance, and the very best possible chance,
is to take it for granted that they really
can do something and do 1t well, and let
their works and not the public praise
them.-New York Ledger.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31

A housewife whose table linen always
does her good service mends it with fax
embroidery cotton of a number to corre-
spond with the quality of the cloth. Under
the ragged edges of the tear she bastes a
piece of stiff paper, and makes a network
of fine stitches back and forth over it's
edges, carrying the stitches about an inch
beyond the edges of the cut. Thin places
and breaks in linen may be run with the
flax or embroidery floss, and towels should
be mended in the same way.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
A Bait.

Witherby-We been without servant
for week now, but my wife is real good.
She gets up first every morning and starts
the fire
Plankngton-How do you contrive to get
her up?
Witherby-Easy enough. leave lot of
change in my trousers pocket.-Cloak Re-
view.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
Making 1t All Right.

Editor-Oh come now, this won't do.
That joke is as old as the hills.
Paragrapher-SoS Well, head it Bon
mot by Bismarck or some statesman, and
t'll 90 all right.-Tit-Bits
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
Ont of the Question.

Miss Paddington-Do you believe in love
at first sight2
Mr.. Linton-Oh, moi 1t is impossible to
he perfectly sure that girl is rich.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
A Good One.

Susie lat her music lesson)-I'd like to
catch an old air l heard in the music room
last night
PROFESSIONALISM air was that?
Susie (demurely)-Oh, it was a million
are!-Tit-BitS.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
The Perversitx of Girls.

Jamesby-Do you think she'll have your
Nettles-Why, Pm sure of it. Her family
are all bitterly opposed to me.-Chicago
Record,
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31
The Latest Thing.
Too Much to Ask.

"There is one sign that should be placed
over every letter box in the city,"
"What is that?'
POST no lls."-Yale Record.
Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1894-10-31

Clara-Can't you come around to see me
tomorrow night, dear?
Maud-Is it anything important?
Clara-Oh, yes. Your fiance is to be here
Truth.
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
CITATION,

In the County Court OF the state OF
Oregon, for the County of Clntsop.-In
the matter OF the estate of James =,
Metz, deceased. .--Citation:
To John l., Metz, Jess Il. Metz, Mrs,
Prudence Weekly, Mrs Sarah Kearns.
Mrs. Ralph Jackson, Mrs. ]. Metz. and
Mrs. II. Il. jackson, greeting:
In the name of the State OF Oregon:
You are hereby cited and required TO
appear In the County Court OF the state
Of oregon, for the County OF Clatsop. at
the court room thereof. at Astoria. in
the County of Clatsop, ON Monday. the
9TH day Of May. 1894. az 10 O'clock in the
forenoon OF that day, then and there to
show cause. II any exist, why an order
on sale should not be made of the fol-
lowing real eatate. to-wit: Lots Nos. s
and ?. In the northwest quarter OF the
southeast quarter and the southeast
quarter Of the southeast quarter OF sec
ton No, IA. township No. Z. north OF
range No, west. Of the WIN. Mer.. in
Clatsop County. Oregon.
Witness. the Hon. c. A. Mcclure.
Judge Of the County Court OF the state
of Oregon. for the County OF Clatsop
With tke scal q said court sffixed. tAis
~ daS az April A. ID. 1884.
{ Attest; 6, J. TRENcHARn.
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
nARBoR pAYg
An Interesting Program Rendered a
Miss warren's Select School.

The celebration of "Arbor Day" at
Miss Warren's select school on Friday
last was an occasion of most interest
ing and appropriate exercises, which
reflected great credit upon both teacher
and pupils.
From the early morning hours the
school rooms were filled with busy
workers and by / O'Clock the class
rooms had been converted into verit-
able bowers Of foliage and flowers by
the willing and deft hands OF the stu
dents and their friends. The exercises
were opened by an address delivered by
Miss Warm, after which the following
program was ably rendered: Song,
America" by the school; recitation,
Brave Oak" Marion Lewis; recitation,
Harry Flavel; song, Hunting Song"
primary department; recitation, For
est Song Ralph Worsley; recitation,
planting the Apple Tree" Paul Trul-
iinger; recitation, How Brownies We'll
come Spring. Prescott Wright reclta-
tion, "Arbor Day." recitation, "Papa's
Pet" Alice Wright; recitation, "The
Maple Tree" Charles Wright; compost
ton, Trees" Irene Johnson; reading,
MY Country" Kate Upshur; recita-
lion, Incidents Of the French Camp"
Parke Upshur; song, "Meddlesome
Somebody" by school; recitation,
Songs of Seven, Vivian Mayhem;
recitation, ivy Green" Alvin Kirch;
recitation, Harry Cherry; recitation,
THE Use Of Trees" Lester Lounsberry;
recitation, Alfred Funge; recitation,
"The Alder by the River" Winnifred
Rice.
Not small feature Of the days ex-
ercises was the participation Of Miss
Mason's kindergarten en- masse, the
bright, animated faces Of the little ones
forming q most lovely setting to this
picture of Natures Festival"
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
COUNTY DEMOCRATS
Meet and Name Delegates to the State
Convention Yesterday.


Convention Yesterday.
The local adherents of the grand old
party of Jefferson and Jackson met at
Fishers hall yesterday morning and
held their county convention for the
purpose Of appointing delegates TO the
state convention. Before they got down
to business they smoked great many
sewer de bouquet cigars, until the air
was blue, and Joined in the chorus,
What Shall the Harvest Be?" until
they were hoarse.
Then the trouble commenced. City
Attorney Smith, Ben Young and other
statesmen all rose at the same moment
and nominated DR.. Liberty p. Null
link date of Washington, ID. C), for
temporary chairman. This remarkable
concensus or consolidation of opinion
palpably pleased the roseate doctor, and
he blushed clear around to the arm
holes OF his vest. After he had been
unanimously elected, and when he
came to the desk, his necktie was heard
to click In noisy and stentorious man
ner.
The doctor brushed the tears away
from his eyes, and in a voice that was
momentariy warped with emotion he
said he gave thanks for the unso-
licited honor rendered him. If the
Democrats nominated good men there
would be no telling what might happen
In the next June election. Why, maybe
we would get a Democratic congress-
man. The county needed more states
men In Washington" He noticed this
particularly In walking home, and he
thought there was no better batch of
Democrats anywhere than here in Clat-
sop county.
There was yell OF approval at these
sentiments. for the doctor had, in his
usual happy way started everything
right by putting all the delegates in
good humor
C. r. Thomson, o. Sovey, ]. w. So
vey, j, w, Walker c. Bottom and John
credentials by the chairman.
On permanent organization the fol-
lowing composed the committee: Her
man Wise John Hobson, r, w. Keen,
Benz. Young and ]. A, Mcintosh.
After drawing up the order of busi-
ness the election of delegates took
place. and when the ballots were count
ed Il was found that the convention
had paid lasting debt of gratitude
due Herman Wise for his successful ef-
forts In bringing the state convention
to Astoria, by electlng him an alter
nate.
The following are the delegates elect
ed: l.. p. Mulllnix. Ben Young, ]. II.
Smith. A, Norburg. c. r, Thomson and
Thos. Dealey.,
The following were elected as alter
mates: II. Wise. Dr. Alfred Kinney l.
Bergman. N. C. Hilleary, John Hohson
and Alex. sutton.
The chairman then appointed the fol-
lowing committee ON platform; Geo.
Noland. ]. II. Smith. DR. Alf Kinney
and ]. w. Walker.
The convention then adjourned. to
meet on Monday. April sO at 2 p. m.
c. ], Curtis and several other good
Republicans were present as interested
spectators sizing up the kind OF fight
that would have to be made.
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
SUNDAY SERMONS.
Some Sensible Suggestions to Married
Women and Those Who Expect
To Be Married

Do guard against Jealousy. 1t is q
green-eyed monster, seeing what does
not exist, and impelling to dire rage
and despair
Do try to like your husbands friends
and relatives, and not set your face
like flint against those he wants to
have about him.
Do be willing to say frankly forgive
me" II you have been in the wrong. II
| Is a sweet, womanly thing to do, and
only weak, conceited person thinks it
humiliating to admit mistake.
DO remember that man liveth not by
bread alone, but by loving, apprecia-
tive, flattering words from the lips Of
woman, and If they come not from you,
your husband will seek them elsewhere.
DO say, II told you So" if you have
10, but 1t will irritate an angelic tenn
per and do away with the good effect
of your superior judgment. 1t is a
good deal to ask but If possible do re-
frain from Haunting the red flag, Il
told you So"
Do be neat and orderly, but don't
carry these virtues to such an excess
that your husband loses all his home
comfort in his fear of soiling a carpet
or making a ''muss" with books and
papers. Better, by far, the worst con-
fusion, than sense of restraint and
dismal order.
Do dress in accordance with your
means If woman in moderate cir
cumstanees dresses like one of wealth,
1t causes suspicious of her husband or
herself. and means at best a pinched
home and an unworthy ambition. Those
whom you wish to impress only laugh
at your doubt.
Do remember that the love Mndled in
the past cannot live on itself, but must
be daily offered fresh incense. If you
were loved once because you were
bright, comely and charming, you must
be cared for again today because you
are sweet, womanly and companion
able else will the flame burn low, and
cold ashes take the place Of sacred fire.
Do try to keep the love that you
have won, and be as pretty as you can
for your husband. II your hair is in
"crimps'' tie a bright handkerchief or
lace veil over 1t, and always wear a
collar and keep the buttons sewed on
your dress, Nothing so offends a mans
vanity and taste as personal slovenll-
ness in his wife.
Do take some interest in your hus-
bands likes and fancies If he enjoys
base or football, or even a horse race
once In while don't tell him he is
boyish or frivolous, but take some pains
to inform yourself on these subjects
and encourage him to talk to you about
them, and then he will spend his time
with you and think what a bright wife
he has won.
Do realize that the happiness Of mar
ried life depends, in great measure,
upon little things. Patience, punctuali-
ty, desire to please and be pleased;
little care to be pretty and companion
able. do much to make husband and
wife "congenial" and contented; while
want Of personal sweetness and tidl-
ness, habit of fault finding. and a
disposition to be ever behind time have
sundered many hearts and lives which
God was supposed to have joined to-
gether.
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
TEACHERS INSTITUTE.

There Is some talk OF holding coun-
~ teachers institute in Astoria during
the last week IN April. and the many
friends OF the kindergarten work win
be pleased TO know that they win have
an opportunity to hear al that time a
kindergarten talk by the superlnten.
dent OF the Oregon training school. Mrs,
Caroline Dunlap Of Portland
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
FAT PEOPLE.

Park Obesity Pills will reduce your
weight PERMANENTLY from 12 to Is
pounds a month NO STARVING, sick
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build up the health and beautify the
complexion, leaving no wrinkles or
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difficult breathing surely relieved. NO
EXPERIMENT. but scientific and
positive relief. adopted only after years
OF experience All orders supplied d.
rect from our Office. Price $500 per
package. or three packages for $500
by mail. postpaid. Testimonials and
particulars. (seaiedl 2 cents
An correspondence strictly cenfden-
tial.
PARK REMEDY co: Boston. Mass
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
WHO TOLD AsToRIA2

How much Is LeaVenworthP
How fast does Chicago?
Who is 1t Council Bluffs?
And who laid Buffalo?
oh, whom does Syracuse?
What sad sight has Racine?
Why throw that Little Rock?
Who painted Bowling Greeng
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
SWEET MUSIC.

The short concert of Utzinger's Band
In front of The Astorian office last
evening was much appreciated by the
whole staff If what we heard is a fair
sample, the band is certainly now pre-
pared to render some delightful music.
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
roo LONG 10 war;.

The editor Of an eqstern paper, who
evidently has plenty or time on his
handa. gives the following advice;
'Sor = the time % plant srees. fhe
elm makes a nice tree IN about twenty
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
A NEW WAY TO pur IT.

Who says an Astorlan woman can't
get right mad? One Of them, who lives
up on the hill, told neighbor the other
day that II she should ever happen to
put her finger in her eur she would
have II mashed all to pieces by the
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15

years" That may be all right back
cast, but twenty years is almost life
time in the west. It's like waiting for
railroad
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
FATAL olL EXPLOSION,

Chicago, April 14-A unian Tank line
car took fire and exploded today One
boy was killed and several men badly
Injured
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15

SITUATION WANTED--To do gen
eral housework or nurse. by middle
aged woman; also. light work for a
Young girl. Address X. /. NJ. this
Office
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
INDUsrMALs GETTING EAST,

Omaha. April l4.--The San Francisco
branch OF the industrial army reached
North Platte today
The daily morning Astorian. [volume] (Astoria, Oregon) 1883-1899, 1894-04-15
NEW TODAY.

WANTED--Sewing BY competent
seamstress. Apply to Mrs. Mary
Schultz, ia Main street.
The National tribune., 1894-01-11

Cavalry, on the extreme right of our arr
on the third day at Gettysburg, when S
was completely routed, and foiled in b.. q
tempt TO turn our right flank and get il III
rear Of cur army. while Fitzpatrick success
fully projected our left flank at the sacrifice
of the gallant Farnsworth and many of his
men?
These are but few of the many incidents
/ might name many others, matters of his
tory-which go to prove that during the year
1863 the cavalry had done its fair share of
active, efficient service, and when Gen. Sheri-
dan assumed command it was as we'll
organized aud disciplined as the infantry.
Ia fact. the infantry had not been phenome-
nally successful, except at Gettysburg, before
the advent of Gen. Grant
/ fully indorse Col. Joyce's estimate of
Gen. Sheridan, and no one can more admire
his sterling characteristics as bold and
successful officer than do, but l do not be-
lieve that he could have accomplished what
he did if his cavalry had been in the almost
helpless condition claimed.
/ think it is about time that the true his
tory of the cavalry be recognized, and that
the date of the first dead cavaryman be fixed
at some period prior TO the end of the WAR;
There was glory enough for all, and no one
arm of the service should claim a monopoly.
IS. c. SMITH, 1st Me- Cav, Winfield. Kan.