The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1894-02-07

a BOX party-tne CHRISTMAS shOp-
per. Philadelphia Record.
LUMBERMEN are not necessarily
loggerheads. Lowell Courier.
THE faro-dealer admits raw ma
terlal free.-Galveston News.
A eRoss-oUTRAeE-fnd IL few
packages short. Florida Times.
TALK about women being Nightly
Look at bank cashiers. Texas Sift-
ings
AN empty stocking can be pro
nounced false yarn. 49, Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
Nor even a canal horse would ever
get ahead II he didn't have a pull.
Boston Transcript.
1T Is a poor cordage trust that has
not more than one string to its bow.
Washington Star.
A MAN can talk himself out OF a
job easier than he can talk him self
into one.-Atchison Globe.
THE blossom has left the button.
hole these influenza days and settled
on the nose. Omaha World.
WHEN the Hawaiian patriots say
they have the spirit Of '76" that
takes in about all Of them. Plain
Dealer
JAGsON says you can't blame a the.
atrical company for being spiritless
when the ghost won't walk. Emira
Gazette.
STRoNo-Would YOU call Supplies
wife handsome? Yes-if ]
was talking to Supple. -Raymond's
Monthly.
The money man tucks away In
his "inside pocket" may be looked
upon as vested security. -Yonkers
Statesman.
WHEN you speak to a youth about
book learning these days he thinks
you are just In from the race-track -
Dallas News.
BLoBBs-Whv do you call your girl
silent belle? Slobbs Because /
kissed her and she never tolled. -
Philadelphia Record.
The bOiler-maker with oratoral
tendencies ought to have little
trouble in rlveting the attention of
his hearers.-BufTalo Courier.
IT argues no lack of ability in n
boy that he doesn't make an opening
for himself by going skating on too
thin ice.-Philadelphia Times.
THE iron founder may he a large
propOrtioned man, but he never yet
in his business, succeeded in casting
a shadow. --Yonkers Statesman.
"YoUR neighbor appears to have
failed great many times" "Iust
twenty.four times. The next will be
his silver bankruptcy. "-f'liegende
Blactter.
BRIDEGROOM (at the end OF the
wedding)-"Well, / am glad it Is all
over" Married Friend-"All over?
Great Scott, man! You have only
just commenced. Puck.
Miss BACoN-"On the ranch we
girls ride the horse bareback ed. "
Mr.. Knickerbocker (severely)-"I
should think the sun would blister
you terribly. ."-Scribner's.
MAY-"What made you tell that
horrid Miss Stumble that she danced
like an angel?" Arthur Because |
thought they never danced, and
neither will she. It'd Bits.
"WHAT is your objection to private
theatricals?" he asked Of the sour.
faced man. "The publicity that is
Invariably attached to them was
the reply. Washington Star.
SHE-"I wonder IL there will be
anything to talk about in the next
world" He--"Oh, yes. You know
there is always something to say on
the other side. Boston Transcript.
VIsIToR-"And which is the older,
Tommy, YOU or Willie?' Willie
"We're tie" Visitor-(mystified)- -
"What do you mean by tie?" Tommy
-"We'rc twins. "-Philadelphla Rec.
ord.
LIFE is full of disappointments.
Many a girl who expects to marry
and settle down finds she has to set
tie way up on the top floor of ten
story tenement house. .-Elmira Ga.
lette.
"CAN | change my occupation un.
der the terms of this insurance pol.
lcy?" what do you wish to be?"
"A football player" "No." "Can
become a Brazilian insurgent?'
| Yes. Life.
PRoPRIETOR-"What's the row at
that bargain counter" Floor walker
--"No row at all. A party OF college
girls are among the crowd, and are
working 10 the front by flying
wedge. PUCK.
VExED WIFE-"There is no caam.
ity that can beiall woman that
have not suffered" Amiable IIus
band-"Wrong. my dear; now, you
have never been u widow" Nexed
Wife-"l said calamity, sir.-Brook,
yn Life.
LADy-"There were chickens In
those eggs you sold me yesterday.
Are you going TO make me pay for
| l.