davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
QUEER PROFEsSORsHIPS.
Professors of Mouse Catching, Shaving and
"SayonoIogy,"

''SavonOlOgy."
A short time ago, as walked through |
the hall leading to my clearinghouse
bedroom, / was surprised to see the
door open and man on his knees in
the corner. inquired of the chamber
maid why he was there.
"Oh, he's all right" she answered.
''Hes Prof Wilkins"
"Why did you bring him UP here?"
asked. 81 always wish to have callers
wait for me in the parlor."
"Oh," giggled the girl, "what would
he be in the parlor for? He's Prof.
Wilkins, the mouse man. Some of the
boarders complained there was mice in
the house, and he's looking for them!"
When interviewed Prof Wilkins, he
informed me that he was professor
of rodentology, and I found that his
mind really had scientific turn. He
gave me some interesting facts in con-
nection with the mouse-catching bust
ness. One tale was of a lady who was
sued by her maid for damages because,
in her terror at discovering a mouse in
a sugar basin, she had flung mouse,
sugar and basin at the girls head.
Another story illustrated the influ-
ence of certain conditions of dreams.
The k.ofessor assured me that one of
his customers dreamed of mice when
ever she ate cheese!
On the register of hotel in a west
ern town | read prof. Perkins and
staff" A geological survey was in
progress. Probably, reflected, Prof.
Perkins was conducting it.
That night, through the transom OF
my door, 1 heard an unusually pene-
trating voice instructing class, but
the subject was not geology. The
stranger was giving points to his
agents on setting forth the merits of a
) certain soap. The principal point was
) the purity of the ingredients. Th'
oil used was of such quality that in
the soap factory, at the lunch hour
the operatives left the butter provided
for them, preferring to dip their breac
In the sweet and delicate oil. This wa
no reflection on the butter, which wa
best creamery.
was so interested in this strange
{ that inquired of the clerk: "Who ha
the room opposite miner?
= "Prof Perkins and two of his staff.
i Prof. Perkins was professor c
a savonology!
Prof. Null, tonsorial artist, live
/ across the border. Shortly after h
D marriage, walking with his darl
u skinned bride, he met customer-or
d of the Four Hundred of his city. mi
D. tab Blankins," he exclaimed, blockir
the way of the astonished man, mi
n tab Blankins, pahmit me to ihtahdu'
u Mrs. Professah Null. Mrs. Professs
u Null. Mistah Blankins. Kate Field
- Washington.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

most of the effect depends upon the
colors and materials employed for it,
Of course it is made up on founda-
ton of stout cardboard, which is cut
into diamond shape and used with
one point uppermost, the brush being
slipped into loop specially made for
It. Cut piece of MORE, or of satin, or
velvet, or plush, for the front, just
about one-hah inch larger all round
than the cardboard. Cut also band
of buckram about two inches wide,
and three inches longer than will
stretch acrose the diamond horizontal
ly from point to point. Cover this buck
ram with plush or velvet to accord with
the rest of the covering, and line the
middle of this band with scrap OF
silk; the ends need not be thus lined.
Sew number of little imitation gems,
or large spangles, at equal distances
along the center of this band, and add
some small pompons or drops of some
kind to the lower edge. Lay this band
across the center of the satin from
point to point, sew it down firmly at
each end from the wrong side, but
leave the exact middle of the band
slack so that the handle of the brush
will slip easily into it. The reason for
lining the middle part Of the band Is
now obvious
Now stretch the satin very tightly
over the cardboard, drawing the raw
edges together on the wrong side with
lacing stitches of strong thread. BE
careful to get the band in the middle
quite straight, for the holder will be
anything but ornamental II this is
crooked. 1t Is as we'll to add the cord
round the edges below the band, the
bow at the tip of the point, and the ring
to hang the holder up by, before lining
the back neatly with sateen or piece
of plain silk.
1t is quite possible to make up thu
feather brush itself at home, If the
worker is anxious for the whole thing
to be of her own workmanship, or /
she happens to have number of fame.
feathers that she would like to use up
A turned stick is needed, which ma.
either be gilded or enamelled. TAX
the shortest of the feathers and arrang
them with the tips downward round tn
lower edge Of the stick. Tie them iirml
In place with some fine Irvine, and glu
this well to prevent it from coming III
tied. Add second set Of feather
rather longer than the others, and 81
cure them also with fine Irvine, gluin
, this as before. Continue this until tn
, brush 10 full enough, and hide the enc
of the last set Of feathers with "suga
, paper" shaped piece Of velvet, secure
: here and there with touch Of glue, an
5 having band of wide gold braid tackc
. round the upper edge to hide the pla'
where the velvet and stick meet. II
: lower edge of the velvet should be va
S qyked. 1t is a good plan to use kid
B, leather instead of velvet, and the
n should be no difficulty in getting tn
}, of q good and suitable color, as maj
bookbinders will dispose of scraps lie
l. over from their own work.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
The Etiquette of the Fan.

There is an endless etiquette In the
use of fans, and with the japanese the
fan is an emblem Of life. The rivct
end is regarded as the starting point
and as the rays of the fan expand so
the road of life widens out toward
prosperous future. It is Also said that
the japanese ogi originally took its
shape from their wonderful mountain,
Fuii-san, which represents to them all
that is beautiful, high and holy. When
one begins to understand all this there
comes a salutary feeling of Ignorance,
and we perceive that the japanese may
claim to be among the great symbolists
in the world. A continuance of such
study might turn the most hardened
European into Japonophile.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

PlTH AND POINT.
Big words often make poor cloak
=.

Big words often make a poor cloak |
for a small idea, Rams Horn,
-"Boy, is your father imp" 81 guess
so. Heard ma call somebody Ounce"
Miss Casey always pay as GO
Gertrude (who is tired -"Do you see
anything in this room you wonld like
to buy?"-Vogue.
-Teacher-"What does your father
work at, johnny" Johnny O'Shea-
"He don't woilS at muffin; he'sa police
man. See?"- Brooklyn Eagle.
Don't you think this spring chick.
en- is excellent?" Boarder-"Yes; !
should think it would outwear even
Russia leather. "-Inter-Ocean.
The Best Evidence. -Cobwigger-
SIS it long since he bought this sub
urban residence?" Merritt-'It can't
be. He hasn't tried to sell it yet" y
Puck,
"A Usual neutrality-suspicious.
was loaded last night" Corkton-
"Well, that must have been the reason
he shot off his mouth so often. Free
Press.
-Mother-"Why do you stay at
home all the time?' Have you no
friends to visit? Laura-'Yes, one,
but can not endure her. "-Fliegende
Blaetter.
-Willis-"You don't like to play
poker with Jones, do you?" Wallace
"What leads you to think SOP" Willis
Jones says he likes to play with
you."-Harlem Life.
Hungry Higgins-"Say, it amt hot
on the road, here, ner nuthin'." Weary
Watkins-"Yo said 'er. Don't you
wisht we was in some nice, cool jailP"'-
indianapolis Journal.
$50 you feel you can not marry
him." "Yes, l am fully decided "
"Wby, don't you like him?" ooh,
like .him well enough, but can't get
him to propose. brooklyn Life.
-Cantley-"There is room for inn
provement in every home" Tophore-
''Not in mine" Cantley-"Why, is YOU
home so perfect?" Tophore-"No, bu'
we live in a fiat. IN. Y. World.
-Teacher-"Why was Solomon thu
wisest man in the world?" Boy-"H'
had so many wives to advise him.
Teacher-"Well, that is not the answe
in the book, but you may go up head.
-Tailor-'Mr. Overdue, hear tina
YOU are about to be married to Mis-
Bullion. Allow me to congratulate
, you" Overdue (extending his hand)-
, "Allow me to congratulate you. Tit
Bits
= Not for Inspiration, Before l be
gan on this story" said young MI
:, Graffik to his friend" 81 opened
7 small bottle" ''Of yellow labeli
= asked his friend. "Of ink" replied tn
y writer.-Truth.
a Book Agent. is that bool
q ma'am, How to Play the Piano.
Lady of the House-''What book?
!. didn't order any book" Book Agent
Nom, but the neighbors told me
4 bring it to you. Harlem Life.
-Truthful-"What horrid humbu
you are" "Why, my dear?" "Wh,
you said to Mrs. Longchild that 81
didn't look as if she could be I'll
c. mother of Miss Longchild, and 81
is looks ninety" 81 know it, but 81
n, looks like an old maid. "-Harper's b
ra | Ear
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

1t is too bad to have ones polished
tables and stands covered with little
rings where a vase has stood and the
water has overhowcd. There Is no
need of this, either. Everybody should
have on hand an abundant supply of
these mats. These need not be obtru-
sive in design. In fact, no one wants
any more the elaborate CONNECTION that
were once wont to call attention to
their crocheted splendors in our draw
ing rooms. Make the latter-day vase
mats of small rounds of olivc-green
felt, preferably not ornamented at all
except for a ''pinked" border. No ono
will notice them, but they will keep
your rosewood and mahogany from
harm.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

foundation, and circular piece two
and half inches In diameter for the
bottom. Cover these with any pretty
scrap of silk or plush, fitting the out
side snugly about the cardboard, which
you have sewn in cylinder; sew In q
piece three and half inches in diam
eter for the top, leaving an aperture
through which you may stuff the cush-
ion, rounding up the top If all your
toilet appointments are white, cover
this with ruffle of lace of fine dotted
Swiss, and tic at the top with bows
and loops Of narrow ribbon.-American
Agriculturist.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
THE TALL GIRLS MISTAKE.
She Started out to Have Fun with the
Young Englishman.

Young Englishnhn.
The tall girl with the yellow hair
and the white dress had announced her
intention of having fun with the young
Englishman who was Il guest at the
house where she was staying. lie had
but lately arrived in this country, and
he was here for a few days on his way
TO leisurely inspection of the west.
II suppose, Mr.. Cholmedly," the tall
girl said when she got her proposed
victim ranged up beside lot of other
girls who wanted to see and hear the
fun. 81 suppose you find this country
much different from EnglandP"
"Indeed, l do replied the young
Englishman, politely. at is very diff
ferent."
"Do you like it?"
81 hardly know yet. have seen but
very little of it, you know"
Disappointed, aren't youP"
81 can't say that am"
Weren't you grieved because you
didn't find any Indians in Central park
in New York waiting to scalp UNI
wary Britons? You surely thought In
dians would be there"
Pardon me, but had no such idea"
"Well, you expected to hunt buffalo
on Long Island. I'll be bound, and
looked for cowboys and MeXicans on
the wharf, to say nothing of bears and
deer in the battery?"
"You are entirely mistaken. | ex-
pected to find none of the things You
have mentioned"
"But you didn't know how large
this country was. You had an idea
confess now-that you could run up to
Buffalo in half an hour from New
York;"
81 knew it was ten-hour ride
The tall girl was rather disconnected
by this time, but she bit her lips and
continued the battle. "IIad no idea OF
going out to California and back in the
same day?"
"No."
Didn't think that most of the peo
pie here were savages and dressed IL
skins when dressed at all?"
Certainly not"
"All our habits, customs and instltu
tions were strange and outlandish t.
you, no doubt?"
"Some of them strange, but none o
them outlandish."
The tall girl was nonplussed. Tn
other girls were laughing at her dis
comfiture. She nervously twisted an
! UNFINISHED her handkerchief and finall
said: "Well, you are queer sort of a
: Englishman. How is it you know S
much?"
In tones icy enough to cause dro
in temperature the young Englishma
| replied: because, miss, studio
| geography when was at school
g Then, while the tall girl blushed re
: as peony, he confined: II ais
t studied department. something whicl
e fear, was not included in your curr
" culum."
c The tall girl was so mortified th'
r she didn't leave her room for two day
d Buffalo Express.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
why Women Chew Gum.

Some one buying chewing gum at a
candy shop lately began to apologize
for the plebeian purchase: "Oh, we
don't think anything about it any
more" replied the saleswcman. 80
many women chew gum for dyspepsia
that we always take it for granted
that that Is why 1t Is wanted"
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
THREE YEARS OLD.

What Is II like, wonder, TO roam
NJ Down through the tall grass hidden quite,
10 ieel very far away from home
When tho dear house is out Of sight,
az wuht 70 play with the broken moon
~ IN the star garden OF tho skiesY
40 sleep through twilight ewes OF juno
boneath the sound OF lullabysY
10 hold up hurts for all to see,
Sob at imaginary harms?
10 clasp In welcome fathers knee
And tit so well to mothers arms,
AZ naVe me bounded by one dull road,
wood and pond, md to feel no lack,
10 gazo with pleasure unon a toad.
ana caress q mud turtles horny bacl,p
10 follow the robins cheerful hop
with oil the salt small hands can hold,
And coaxingly cntrcat 1t to stop
What is 1t like to be three years oldY
Ali once knew, but twas long aro.
Try to recall 1t In vain-in vaini
AND now know shall never know
what 1t is to be q child again.
-Etneiwyn Wetherald, In Youths Companion
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
Punctuality ia n Virtue.

The habit of being always little
late is so general that it might seem
unavoidable, were 1t not that punctu'
atty is secured from the very persons
at fault when the occasions are as
guarded as In the wedding to which
the foolish virgins failed to gain adj
mission because 1.-THE doors were shut. "
1t is better to train up children to
order, punctuality, honesty in keeping
engagements, MS part keeping ones
word, and SO teach them not only self
reliance, but make them men and
women on whom reliance may be
placed.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
TELEGRAPH CODES.
The Limited Number OF Words That Can
BE Used In Them.

Inc LlIhittu VI "oIuo 1h"p WIN
BE Used In Them.
The compiler of really reliable and
comprehensive code is met at the out
set of his undertaking by difficulty
that, so far, has deied all attempts at
solution beyond a certain point. De-
spite the fact that the rules of the
cable companies permit him to lay un-
der contribution eight languages, the
total number of words that can be used
with safety for coding purposes is only
about one hundred and fifty thousand.
The reasons for this are two-fold.
First, the companies decline to permit
the use of any code word of more than
ten letters, and it is dangerous to EN-.
ploy those having less than seven, ow-
ing to the difficulty of detecting an
error in short words. Further, thou
sanls, nay hundreds of thousands of
words are rejected because of the SINH
larity of the telegraphic symbols that
make up the letters.
Figures are rarely telegraphed. The
possibility of noting an error in a
group of arbitrary figures is very re-
mote. Should letter or two be
"jumbled" in a code word, there are
various ways of correcting the mistake
the sense, the context, and reference
to the code; but these guides do not ap
ply to the case of figures. The only
remedy for suspected error is repeti
ton of the message at an enhanced
cost Of fifty per cent. Numbers, there
fore, are expressed by a code word
Errors in the transmission of amounts
of money are very rare, banker
code contains words for every possibl,
sum of money, from halfpenny up t.
hundreds of thousands of pounds; ant
the authors have exhibited great in
genuity in making limited supply o
words do very extensive service
Chambers Journal.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
One Dollar Per Year.
HAT PIN CUSHIONS.
vo Pretty Designs Which Can lie Made
nj 0maIl Cost

two Pretty Designs Which Can he maue
ut Small Cost.
In these days when hat pins IRE aS
much Of fad and of necessity with
al, us stick pins, 1t is desirable that ap-
propriate receptacles BIO provided for
them in order that they shall not mar
the dainty toilet cushion with their
huge perforations. Where suspended
cushion seems most convenient the III
ways attractive little Japanese doll
may be utilized. Choose one with a
head measuring six inches in circum-
ference To dress one, as shown in
Fig in the illustration, fold half
yard of three-inch ribbon together and
crease it to designate the bottom of
the cushion. Sew thirteen small gilt
spongles along the bottom, with n gilt
bead in the middle of each to fasten it
on. Overland the sides of the ribbon
to within an inch and half of the OPP
posite end; stuff with hair or wool and
fasten it around the dolls neck. A
half yard of the Same ribbon Is cut In
two and folded lengthwise for tho
sleeves; overland, turn In the ends at
the bottom, and attach to the dress at
the shoulder. Now take yard and n
quarter of half-inch ribbon, fasten 1t
over the shoulder and tic about the
waist with bow and ends in front, al
though the really japanese lady al
ways wears her sash ends behind,
neatly tucked up into sort of roll or
cushion. A loop of this same ribbon is
fastened to the belt in the back to sus-
pend the cushion by. Decorate tho
sleeves and shoulder straps with
spangles and beads, and finish with a
fringe of the beads Letter on the
skirt HAT Pins in gilt, forming tho
letters to look as much like japanese
characters as possible.
The standard cushion shown in Fig.
requires bit of thin cardboard, five
by nine inches, for the sides of the
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

Tear the crust from part OF a loaf
of bakers bread. Now tear the crumb
of the loaf into long, thin pieces.
Spread the torn bread il a pan and put
in a hot oven to become brown and
crisp. II will take about fifteen min
utes. Serve hot with cheese. Pulled
bread is also nice with chocolate or
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

"A curious light has been thrown on
the profits of street singers in Paris by
a wild lark in which some amateur
vocalists INDUCED lately. Disguised in
dilapidated clothes, one posing as an
Arab, they made the tour of the Grand
boulevards, singing before the cafes,
and in one day cleared 12l francs (S24,
to which they added another go francs
Q2) the same night, by taking in the
Latin quarter. Their stock in trade
was Gascon song, which the public
took for a native Arab air, and SEN
timental French ballad.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

Toronto was the name of an Indian
village when Gov. Sincoe made it the
capital Of Upper Canada in 1894, and
named it York. There the seat of the
provincial government remained until
1s41, when Upper and Lower Canada
(now Ontario and Quebec formed a
legislative union. When the confed-
Grafton was formed in 1867, Toronto,
the name by which York had been
known since 1884, became the perma
ncut seat of government for Ontario.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

Eleven thousand guineas is now
the record price paid in an auction
room in London for a picture. This
amount was realized at Christie's for
Sir Joshua Reynolds portrait of Lady
Betty Define, sister of the earl of
Carlisle, with her children, a picture
which is well known through engrav-
ings. 1t was put up at 5000 guineas,
and was secured by Mr.. Charles
Wertheimer, dealer, for 1l,0OO
guineas. The famous Duchess of
Devonshire," by Gainsborough, which
so mysteriously disappeared, was
knocked down for 10, 100 guineas, and
the Raphael in the Dudley collection
two years ago went for about 1900
guineas.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
Cactus Calling Cards.

Many are the uses to which the cac-
Jus is put, but one of the queerest is
that which prevails in Cape Town,
South Africa, where cactus leaves are
made to serve the purpose of visiting
cards. The leaves of the special kind
of cactus used for this purpose are not
very prickly, however, and further
more, these unique cards are not car
ricd about, but arc left growing on the
plant which stands at the foot of the
front steps. When a lady calls she has
only to take out her hatpin and scratch
her name on the glossy surface of one
of the leaves, while gentleman ac-
composites the same end with his knife.
The lines thus scratched turn silver
white and remain clear and distinct on
the leaf flor years. New Years day
these cactus cards arc particularly con
venient, and popular hostesses often
appropriate large branch of their cac
tus plant to the registry of visits re
ceived that day.-St. Louis Globe Dem
ocrat.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
The best American railways are run

The best American railways are run
more efficiently than any others on
earth. 1t has even been proved that an
American road, thoroughly equipped,
will carry greater weight with the
same power than an English owned
and managed road. In this case the
advantage lay in the American method
of arranging the load and of applying
the power
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

Machinery is about to be appl led
in the manufacture of tin plates to an
extent never known before. 1t is pre-
dicted that from the use of machinery
in parts of the process, where the
Welsh tin-plate makers still use hand
labor, the American manufacturers
will in time be able to undersen the
foreigners in other markets than our
own
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
Regarding ostrich Plnme.:

In each wing Of the ostrich twenty
six long white plumes grow to MATURE
ty in eight months. In the malc these
arc pure white, while tllocc Of tie fs7
male shade TO ecru or gray.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27

Complimentary Friend-Very strik
ing woman, Mrs. Van Snort.
Mr.. Van Snort--Yes; she hit me for
ten this morning -Judge
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1894-09-27
WOMAN AND HOME.
HANDY THING TO HAVE.

No House Should BE Without q Feather
buster Holder-Easlly Made II the In
structions Given Below Arc Carried out
But Few Cents Needed TO Buy tho
Material.
The feather brush is as popular as
ever us useful ornament for draw
ing-room, and there Is, therefore no ex-
cuse to be made for dust upon Brackets,
pictures or knicklsnaclSs of any sort.
The holder shown here is, rs seen from
the SKETCH by no means elaborate, and
The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1894-08-04
OKLAHOMA OUTLINES

At Guthrie the tax rate Is Il 6 mills.
There are $500 persons OF school age in
" county.
Hay at kildare sells for 81 ton delivered
at the depot.
The strip will have its first birthday
September 10.
Last Wednesday it was Ia in the shad /.
at Woodward.
The Oaio junior leads all the other
potatoes at the Oklahoma experimental
farm.
Dennis Flynn writes TO Enid saying that
he viii DO everything in his power for that
town.
Enid and Pond Creek are not 80 anxious
now 10 have the United States senate
abolished.
TIE Rock Island railroad has finished re-
pairing al the bridges which were
blown up.
T-cums-h Is 8 divorce center. The Re
publican Of thst place publishes divose-
motto every week
saltwater Is mighty lively town. I,
hssau railroad tut il has four news.
papers and four hanks
The Wood vard Jeffersoniaa believes
Ca one Of the God given rights OF The
people j. ta- right 10 abGse congress
Perhaps the Congregational college va
located in Kingfisher because hiuEfishs
= great place for people TO eonErsEate.
Tie Guthrie Leader IS huatiES Coz the