davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
PHASES OF MODERN LIFE,
A Case For e.. G..

'Wha!t a lot of hunibug there Us about
this vernliform appendix business ex-
claimed Ruggles, looking up from the
newspaper he was reading. The idea
that everybody is in danger from get
ting g, grape seed or a bit of apple skim
lodged in a portion OF ms ANATOMY t MAJ
few persons ever heard of till a few
years ago is absurd. It's a fad. That
WHAT'S fad?" inquired Croxton, lay
ing aside the magazine he had been
.'This appendicitis bus ness
ITS something. everybody's remotely
exposed to, isn't ft?"
tain that everybody has got a verml-
form appendix.
20, it isn't
'!Well, you have. just the same. You
are built like other men,"
II don't believe it, y
you say you have no verniform ap-
II do, and I'm willing ito bet on it.
How much?'
FIFTY dollars
CroXton- reflected moment.
And leave the matter to a doctor-my
doctor, for instance?
Yes 80 >,
'eWeil, you've lost My doctor will tell
YOU 1 haven't any. He relieved me OF 1t
by an operation of two years ago. ~
..It looks as if you'd put up a neat Ht-
tie Job on me, doesn't it?" ;,
"Rather. But I'll not be hard. II cal i
1T a new silk hat, and let 1T go at that. :
HIM! Your doctor relieved you Oh
your vernliform appendix, did he?
And I suppose he preserved it care
fully in jar of alcohol?
mo: but 1 did
HIM! Got it yet?'
Yes
"That is, 1 er-er- ,..4,o
THAT'S what 1 suspected. Your little
scheme isn't exactly the first of ITS KIND
but there's way out of it, you sse.
Don't try to crawl out of it, Ruggles:
You bet $50 you hadn't any verInl1or I.t
appendix, and it seems to me you nave
by your own confession There ere, vas Eagt me-
The morse isn't on me; it's on you, Rug
giles But 1 won't be hard on YOU s,ltb n eSt
trais. That'n make it easy. 1t won /
come to more than $40 or SO: ..,,.,-
"Crowton' said Ruggles. teeoly, let
arbitrate. Chicago Tribune.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23

his jack-knife and brought 1t home in
his carpet bag. 1t has been in the fam
lily ever since. 1t is an heirloom. The
spring giant is afraid of it. He thinks
it will give him a, chill. 1T may keep
him back"
Ride faster,'' urged My Lady Prim-
rose, and the prince spurred the black
horse. but the spring giant gained on
them. His arms, like waving branches,
seemed almost to touch them; he cast
a shadow over them, and the sounds of
rustling leaves and angry birds were in
their very ears
oh, My Lady" silrieked the nurse,
feel in your pocket and see if the piece
of the north pole is safe
My Lady Primrose put her hand in
her pocket: then she gave a cry of dis
may. The piece of the north pole was
not there.
Oh" she sobbed, 81 have left it in
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
cou1dn,t stand the Expense.

A well-known brilliant entertainer, who
has just returned from a five years tour
in South Pacific seas says the Melbourne
Argus, has many amusing tales TO TELL
arnons W4hich is the following:
II was ordering my advertisement IN n ..
Melbourne daily newspaper office one me , gay
when a, tall, lanky countryman walked
i'm and said he wanted an i'm memorlam
notice in the obituary column Of the pa
per. II, ,..,, ae,o,, s,a
axnlained and / should like d bit po-
etry in the paper about him .-,. e
IAN right answered the clerk have
YOU brought it with you? CO.
No Said the rustic. Can't you fix
' Certainly replied the clerk clerk =, our Dur
charge for lin menoriam' notices IS SIX
IA look of intense anazement passed
over the countryman,s face, &c no made
Good graciousn he cried as ne mace a.sts
for tg1e door. I can't afford 'that-rny
guvnor was six feet high
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23

she led the young man into the parlor,
where My Lady Primrose sat. She
wore a ruffied yellow silk gown, and
her little, round face was all pink with
bushes. She trenbled when the young
man went down on his knees and
asked her to marry him, and go away
with him to his country. 81 am
prince" said he, 'and you shall be
princess and live in a white palace and
dine on stuffed .peacocks and wear
pearls as big as robins eggs and dia-
monds like the stars. But, more than
all that, you shall have my true heart
to keep for your own all your life"
IT'S the gift of a king, and the gift
of a man, and primroses grow not in
his country" said the old nurse, and
her green eyes shones
NV Lady Primrose smiled at the
prince and the fragrance of a primrose
came in his face. Il care nothing about
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
whex He went In the smoker.

She was young and good looking Dut
very rural, and the drummer an the sea.
t,sol. of her did want ito move over and
tsIL to her. but she didn't give him any
Chance chan FINALLY he offered to put the
window up for her. ~ ny,
No she said. II don't , van II up
YOU U1s don't have to- she chirru ped
but if you want to set in this seat w6.n
me, why don't you? promised i:a,5Idn my 4 fsik
oahu rim r5,, MI that wasn't homeler than
to 10 M any and and s said if would keep that
round the. world by myself You sod Re sSe
, neeli I over to make room for him; but
he l,eog heard seven people laugh, and ne
lacked out and went into another cdr.-
Itetrnit Free PrGSS.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
pRu.RNABLE HOUSEKEEPING.

curious case Of mouse moving was
recently witnessed in Oregon. A man
ybo owned a. residence at Sea tie,
,1Ti,i.f cost him five thousand doll rs
~ ersct. removed to Olympia and did
mot nave sulncient funds TO u la n
other house. He bought lot en-
c1u e t. r move the building n owned
at Static. Everyone laughed a. him,
but re persis "a. Rolling tie nou=e
down to the river, he loaded it upol d
scow and it was soon at Oiym Ia, d
distance of about sixty miles. Then he
lad 1t rolled upon his lot, an. strange
to say, not a timber was strained, nor
even a piece of furniture broken, al
though he had not removed tia con-
tents before starting the house upon
it's unusual journey.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23

IL, III Il. IL, i, Z, 1,ea
Sc q,
-
lff
ff, as STOOD 81, ara called for
i,er, <re< han, rs .3s,rse cried
osIf .e san, hines., she
bisfjSas3 svo,, I, moi q faf7av:''
g,3,,z - "A u sai fi1ss prince
ri. < saw van,
s III s,,ss lf;,, Ais ef,,11,-
~ & with
81 from
sss5t, III u ,,, -,,,,s,, ~ s,,,,
], ~
~ { ) aaid ar
eot +
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
NOT ALWAYS SAFE.
There Was n Degree OF MOckery at
Which the Dude Drew the Line.

dIl btIAIIduSS-l
"A dudish-looking party in a. long
tailed overcoat and turned-up trousers
was picking his way gingerly over a,
muddy downtown crossing the other
afternoon when a, rakish-looking party
in a. rain coat and rubber boots caught
sight Of him.
The spectacle of a live walking dude
appeals irresistibly to the average
mans sense of the ludicrous, and the
rakish-looking citizen, initiating the
gait and general bearing of the other
stalked along soIemnly by his side a.
block or two, in apparent unconscious
ness of the fact that he was creating a
sensation and attracting the amused
attention of everybody on the sidewalk.
In going over another muddy cross
ing the rakish-looklng party, as if by
accident, tripped the dude. The latter
narrowly escaped a fall. and as he re-
covered himself he swung his right. 1t
landed squarely on the jaw, and his
tormentor went down as if a pile
driver had struck him.
You can ape me, don't you know"
he drawled, but baw Jove, you
mustn't monkey with mer'
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
HOME AGAIN.

Signs by which the kansan Knew
He Was in Gods own Country
Once More.
From the Detroit Free Press.J
Two Kansans who had been out of
the state for a number of years re-
turned during the past summer. They
came by way of Omaha, leaving there
at night in an ordinary coach. Some
time during the cary morning hours,
before daylight, there was an accident,
and the car went over a bank and
brought up IN a creek about fifty feet
below the track, smashing thongs gem
orally, but not doing much to the
Kansans except waking and shaking
them up. When the car stopped at the
end of its flight there was a dead 81
ence, broken by the voice of the K51-
san on the forward seat.
..By gosh. BILL he said, ''git up.
We've got thar and we've hit a. cyclone
at the same time, and I guess it must
have blowed us about seven miles,
judgin' by the way we lit
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
ROOM FOR DOUBT.
What Tom Merritt Said to Cleveland
Regarding His Call.
washington Post.]

washington FOSI.J
ga good many of u.s. said Senator
Palmer. "are perhaps saying things
about the president we wouldn't say
before his face. A great deal depends,
however, on the way you say it. re-
member taking Tom Merritt, of Hi
nois, to see President Cleveland one
day. Merritt suffers, and that is pro-
baby the reason the president laughed
at what he said. Shaking the presi-
dents hand, he remarked.
It's b-b-been a, long t-t-time, Mr..
Pres-pres-p since L was here. 1t
w-w-was during the last Democratic
decentralization, before the
war.
so long ago?' the president in
Quired.
81 Yes, Mr. Pres-pres-p president, swo-
swo-swore then th-th-that L would not
ker-ker-ker-come again till there was
another Democratic administration ala
ala-elected and in control. And L amt
sur-sur- certain, Mr.. es-pres-presl-
dent, but wh-but wh+but what l have
ker-ker-ker 1 have come too soon
now -
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
unw Long Married.

..1,h,. Insurance. company is unWlIllng
IN nav the loss ON Muddle's house that
burned"
"Wlhy?'' - -.,,.4.1
'i "pooh. how absurd; ne can prove he
didn't: he's a married man. = chicago
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
A CapitaI Artist.

.eWhat is his profession" said one girl
"He's a. capitalist replied the other.
..0b he is He makes the capital let
ters that begin the magazine articles. =
Wa shin g1ton Star.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
CAUSE AND EFFECT.
TFrcm the Buffalo Counter

can article in this paper says serv-
ant gir.s We're never so scarce in
Chicago as they are now,"
''Humph! Any particular reason
given?'
"Er-another article states that the
police force of the city has been. re-
duced several hundred men"
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
WHAT COUNTS NOWADAYS.

81 was surprised to hear Browns
book sold so we'll; it was miserapiy poor
Eyes. but it was beautifully bound, you
knoW."-Truth. =,
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23

With the usual perverseness of nature,
Christmas comes in the middle of a hard
winter.-Truth.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
yuLErIDE CUSTOMS.

1t IS customary to give a quarter. pres
ent and expect five dollar one IN re-
turn.-Truth.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23

Only once g. year does the janitor Of
your fiat consider that you are worth be-
ing courteous TO, and his Merry Christ
mas is a costly GreetinS.-Truth.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-12-23
GOOD CHEER IN HARD TINES.

WHO dcHleNSS results WITH d SNORT purse
that many with long purses might
envy. She varies her fare by constant
reference to her legacy Of Old recipes,
by experiments and exchanges till some
of her household transformations well.
nigh equal those of Cinderella'S fairy
godmother; she has accomplished the
next thing to drawing blood out of a
turnip, she has coaXed wine from a
parsnip, delicious wine it has been pro-
nounced too. The details of which feat,
after the scarce season just passed,
may not come amiss to the frugal
housewife:
Parsnip Wine.
Over one quart of finely chopped par
snip pour one gallon of cold water and
boil an hour. Then strain it off and add
one pound of raisins- and three pounds
of brown sugar. AS soon as it is cool
mix in one tablespoon of hop yeast.
Cork tightly and do not use for six
months. Then that homely, uninter
esting vegetable, the carrot, yields her
the following wholesome and agreeable
dish:
One pound suet chopped fine.
One pound carrots boiled and rubbed
through a. collander (weigh carrots be
fore they, are. cooked9
Onelhaf pound raisins, stoned,
One-half pound of cilrrants.
One-haff pound sifted -four.
-Four teaspoons brown sugar.
One egg,
mon and ginger.
Put on early, keep covered with hot
waiter and boil until firm. Serve with
wine sauce. This same charming home
fairy always sprinkles a pinch of sugar
over steak as it is broiling and the
improvement is decided
On Christmas eve she follows the old
Virginia custom of brewing egg-nogg.
During Christmas week she makes
ample toddy. both by these famous and
time honored recipes:
Egg-Nogg.
One dozen eggs.
one dozen teaspoons of sugar.
Six wine glasses of whiskey.
Four wine glasses of rum.
Two wine glasses of apple brandy.
One whole nutmeg grated.
Beat the yolles of the eggs TIL very
light. add the sugar and beat again
iii tboroushly dissolved and light, then
add half Of the whites tpeaten until
etiff as possible). Add the whisky, a
ylassf,Il at a. tinne-strring all the time,
then the rum. then the brandy. After
putting in the liquor add three pints
IF fresh milk, having stirred in the
nutmeg before adding the milk.
Apple Teddy.
Put six apples on to bake. When
nearly done pour over them nalf a
pint of water, then a large teacup OF
White su,oar lust before taking up,
,ettine Them scorch brown little at
the bottom. Pour all in bowl and
add:
| One pint of whisky
One pint or apple brandy,
A little grated orange peel and two
thirds of nutmeg grated. Add water
to adulterate.
The Kootenai herald. [volume] (Kootenai, Idaho) 1891-1904, 1894-02-24
PA T EN- rs
Notice to inventors.

There was never a time in the his
tory of our country when the de-
mand for inventions and improve
ment in the arts and sciences gen
orally was so great as now. The
conveniences of mankind in the
factory and workshop, the house
hold, on the farm and in official
life, require continual accessions
to the appurtenances and nipple
ments of each in order to save labor,
time and expense. The political
change in the administration of
government does not effect the pro-
gress of the American inventor,
who being on the alert, and ready
to perceive the existing deficiencies,
does not permit the affairs of gov
eminent to deter him from quickly
conceiving the remedy to overcome
existing discrepancies. Too great
care cannot be exercised in choos-
ing a competent and skilled attor-
ney to prepare and prosecute an
application for patent. Valuable
interests have been lost and des-
troyed in innumerable instances by
the employment of incompetent
counsel, and especially is this adj
vice applicable to those who adopt
the mo patent, no pay" system.
Inventors who intrust their bus
mess to this class of attorneys do so
at eminent risk, as the breadth and
strength Of the patent is never con
sidered in view of quick endeavor
to get an allowance and obtain the
fee then due.
THE PRESS CLAIMS CO., John
Wedderburn, General Manager, 618
F street, n. W., Washington, d. c.,
representing a large number of i'm
portant daily and weekly papers,
as we'll general periodicals Of the
country, was instituted to protect
its patrons from the unsafe methods
heretofore employed in this line of
business. The said company is
prepared to take charge of all pat
ent business intrusted to it for
reasonable fees, and peprares and
prosecutes applications generally,
including mechanical inventions,
design patents, trade marks, labels,
copyrights, interferences, infringe
ments, validity reports, and gives
especial attention to rejected cases.
1t is also prepared to enter into
competition with any firm in secur-
ing foreign patents.
Write for instructions and advice.
JOHN WEDDERBURN,
61S F Street,
P. Q, Box 385, Washington, D. G.
The Kootenai herald. [volume] (Kootenai, Idaho) 1891-1904, 1894-02-24
SILVER.
Even Bradstreet's journal Admits that
the Repeal of the Sherman Law
was bad for Silver.


Bar silver sold in the London
market during the present week at
% lid. per ounce, the CONNER
cial price in New York being SO So
cts. per ounce. The decline brings
the quotations to the lowest level
on record, and is the direct and
natural sequence of the recent ac-
ton of the Indian government in
Withdrawing from its decision to
maintain fixed minimum of Is.
4d, per rupee for India Council
drafts on Bombay or Calcutta. So
completely indeed has the British
India Treasury reversed its policy
that on Wednesday last it sold
100000 rupees at the rate of Is.
2 1-32d. per rupee. The acceptance
of this low rate would show,
that the disposition is to accept
bids at any reasonable figure in re-
lation to the state of the general
market. 1t is, however, significant
that while the tenders for only
100000 rupees were accepted, the
whole amount offered on the day
in question is stated to have been
100000 rupees The inference
from this is that whatever other
tenders were made were on an even
lower basis, the action of the bid
ders being probably governed by
the fact that at the equivalent val
ne Of silver the rupee would com
mand only IL Id, or less than
one half its nominal value in ster-
ling Of Is. Accompanying the
fall in silver there has been during
the week a serious decline in rupee
paper (the silver obligations of the
Indian governmenU, the quotations
for which have receded to So, by
far the lowest price on record.
Mexican and Peruvian secureties
were unfavorably effected in like
degree, the effect of the whole mat
ter, according to cable advices, be-
ing to produce a tone Of depression
not without demoralizing influences
on the entire London money and
securely market.
Despite the latter fact the tone Of
discussion in reference to the situa-
ton by the London press is report
ed to be somewhat complacent.
The Times is said to point out that
while Indian exchange sypathizes
to some extent with the extraordi-
narily low market value Of silver,
1t does not Go so TO the same degree
which would be the case if he In
dia minis had not been closed to
the free coinage of silver. 1t init
mates that in the absence of such
artiDn the exchange value of the
rupee would correspond with price
of silver, and that instead Of COM
manding fraction above Is. I'd.
for Council drafts the price far bills
would be below Is. per rupee.
Other E G ish authorities, it would
seem, discuss the possibility Of a
revival of bimetallic agitation, but
the general conclus on seems to be
that the reassembling Of the Brus-
sells conference or other resort to
international discussion is unlikely,
i'm view of the manifest over pro-
The Kootenai herald. [volume] (Kootenai, Idaho) 1891-1904, 1894-02-24
There Are 5000 Premiums

1t is also noticeable that nearly all
current English accounts of the
markets action indicate that the
refusal of the Indian government
to supplement its recent change of
position by imposing an import
duty on silver bullion has caused
collapse of speculation and thrown
large amounts of silver on the
Indian market, and that to this the
severely of the present decline may
be attributed.
Local financial circles have not
been directly interested in the
movement. Some desultory trad
ing in Silver bullion certificates on
the New York Stock Exchange has
resulted in the extremely low quo
tation of 65c. per ounce, while bul
lion dealers prices for commercial,
as already stated, has sympathized
with the slump Of prices in London.
A general consensus of opinion is
that the fall was inevitable, in view
Of the repeal of the Sherman act
and the necessity Of finding a mar
ket for the 54,000,000 which the u.
). Treasury absorbed yearly under
its provisions, combined with the
action of the Indian government.
Many authorities point to the man
ifest evidence of overproduction,
and the idea finds expression that
the ultimate effect will be a curtail-
ment Of the supply. AT the same
time it can not be said that any
immediate permanent steadying Of
silver prices is looked for under ex-
listing circumstances. 1t is indica-
ted that the severe fall already
taken place has resulted in com
paratively small decline in the
volume of the product, so much of
the output of this country coming
from properties that can be worked
at profit an even a lower level of
value, while a considerable portion
of the product is the result of copper
or gold mining, which will hardly
be interrupted whatever course the
silver market takes.
The remedy for the present de-
probation seems to depend on the
British and Anglo-Indlan gol ern-
ments. The latter, though governed
entirely in its action by the home
authorities, comes in, Of course, Fl r
the fullest measure Of blame, both
from the English financial markets
and the Indian mercantile com
munity. The latter, threatened by
an aggravation Of the monetary
crisis, and by a still severer losses
of business than those which have
already been suffered through the
transfer of Indian trade to China,
is naturally inclined to take an ex-
treme view of the subject. Reports
have already come from Calcutta
that the Indian government has
already under serious consideration
the question Of reversing the un-
successful policy which it inaugu-
rated last June, and to reopen the
minis which were closed by its de-
cree last June to the free coinage of
silver. The truth of this rumor is
however, denied, and in view of
the policy to which the home adj
ministration has so stea1fastly adj
hrred lacks probability.
Arizona republican. [volume] (Phoenix, Ariz.) 1890-1930, 1894-10-13

of two unindorsed checks amounting to
about $40 and 500 in coin and currency,
and then left him to the tender mercies
of the police, who run him in. The
next day Cook went to Lead City and
had merchant cash the checks. When
the purchaser of the checks went to the
bank to get the money on the checks he
was told that orders were out to refuse
payment on them, as they were stolen
property. Cook was then arrested and
bound over for larceny and forgery in
the sum of $500, which he could not
furnish. Buckley felt so bad over the
loss of his money that he did no. know
whether he would appear against Cook
in the trial or not. The judge, in order
to make certain that Buckley would APP
pear against Cook, held him in $3.50
bail. In default of bail Buckley is in
Jail with the man who robbed him.