San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1894-07-12


crude tan. That which was be-
tween the shoes and the feet, IL
there was anything at all, was hid
den from our vulgar gaze. The
trousers, slightly frayed, were on
par with those worn by the average
all-around genius while his
braided white vest, so Jack
later on confided to me, re-
sembled those worn in the day
when his (Jack's) father was a boy,
and reaching from one vest pocket
TO the other, there was stretched
across his chest a heavy plated
chain. his piece of jewelry did
not quite reach from pocket to
pocket, so the missing distance
was filled out with a piece of No. s
thread, and the frequent, ungrati-
fed requests as to what time of the
day he had, was quite enough to
lead one to suppose that piece of
lead at one end of the massive
chain was doing noble duty in
keeping up appearances. But
braided vest and plated chain,
frayed trousers and roof red shoes
were not a circumstance to the
coat. That piece is best described
in the words of Jack, "But boys"
said this queer genius, "that coat
is fearfully and wonderfully made.
1t is what you might call of the
bed tick pattern, huted down the
back, piccoloed on the front and
clarionetted at the elbows" Jack
went further. He called it See
more ,CoXey coat, probably mean.
ing seersucker, and suggested that
the "ruts" on the back would look
better ironed or "mangled," as he
called it.
All this while Shorty was facing
the crowd. The defiant and ghast-
ly glare on his face gave way to
a graveyard grin, as though
no one enjoyed the torture
more than he. Still when the
assembly had exhausted itself
on the topic of his gorgeous make
up, he could not recall his wits SUI
ficiently to tell the "good one" on
Jack. and it fell to the lot of the
cartoon artist, to perpetrate the
expose, which he did in an mimi
table style distinctly his own.
"The other evening the phonO-
graph professor, who by the way,
is going to make tour of Mexico
with a magic lantern and phOnO-
graph aggregation" said the car
toon artist, "invited us to his home
to hear some selections from Faust
which Prof. Bierbach's Weiner
Wurst band had played into the
machine. Jack pleaded that he did
not exactly see his way clear
to present himself in select society
as he had masonic insignia, or in
other words, a keystone patch,
which looks like worm and
porous plaster, inserted in the
bosom of his trousers. However,
as the photograph professor
pledged his word that no one
would be admitted into the room
while Jack was there, the latter
consented. The first traces of iii
kept promises developed when the
fraterL al parent of the phOnO-
graph professor received the COM
pany at the door and ushered them
into a well lighted parlOr. The in
PRODUCTION over, Jack glanced
about him nervously, and darted
Oft in a most sounding manner,in.
to the nearest corner. Then
he turned half around
and backed into a chair.
You could hear the sigh Of relief
that Jack gave, all over the room,
for once on a seat in the corner he
felt quite secure, as far as his patch
was concerned. While we were
gathered around the photograph
Jack never let anybody get be-
tween himself and his corner chair :;
he always kept that passage clear
the parlOr door opened and in
walked some ladies. You ought to
have seen Jack drop the ear piece
of the phonograph, the rush that
he made, and the way he glued
himself to that chair in the corner
off to himself; also the look of
'man the life boat ~ that took pos
session of his face. AS gracefully
as | knew how, passed the
ordinary forms Of etiquette,
but alas, poor Jack, he had
been promised immunity and
now he found himself face
to face with as fair a creature as
ever breathed. The words Mr.
and Miss were all he heard as he
raised the key stone patch a few
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