davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

DteBger's Angleworm Oil Liniment
erbOlOes pgiaa for Brus for Gpr, os
SeItefolf iGtter bet iGroeles bgtt.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13
Sn IfeptiIf Yrub. 8rr

6n ffeptiif grub. 8ruosOmmeu
(%omiaonenoe i'm rise 8ruo): "Wiu
oprebare Stat!"
gruoen: "8u ipnes at tage fell %
tro, at bet er nit BenseItub, bu Omfap.
ner"
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

Zen, Der fan gtbe mig rnoerrstuiul ON,
6bor min 8rooer gnoreU 8 Bobu ira
Soloter, Soma, opboIoer ia. glgr mig IN
3JeHefte. Tor TO War toeH rsi'e bon Der.
ira I'll Barrier, 2. 9atOta. 5toeu Septem.
ter 1893 Dor isg lie bert fra bam. Ears 9.
BObu, Soloier, 3pfud.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

Sebsialb. Den l3oe OCTOBER &l.
Il ON Natten afsif oeb 3sben Gnieu
eiter 8prlase os Giaitsiper 8. Sdmibt
i 8rOballe, Wtarie, fsot glauien, 95
Iar gammel.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

Almost without exception Prof. Breck-
enridge's students are workers who are
fitting themselves to fill useful positions
IN society.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

Wiifacl gr9ffe fra Sarounser, Der
l'99er reo 5eltbusalmenbin9en, fan
maalte sjsre fig til al at bare / 8eiios
oelie al BET itsrite sGble, Tom nOscn
bar feet. Deb Gireiien fra Sarbanser
manlte sgblet 12a 9omme runbt %
peleoe 1 SIG. % Z S~ettooram. Raor
Seb, at Der suar 4 q 5 oroenttise
gGbler paa l Bb. eller ct ballot &ilo,
tan man oanne fig en- Menius ON bette
Barnebooe af ct 9Gble. Set er ppret
paa SeIlano / 2Oftbus; Der uorte bare
bette o9 ct ggble til paa bele 9raet.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

G%feriunbs &ommune bar bepilset
$4,000 8r. til Gteriunos -Sleftefjurbs.
banen.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13
9%eitprelien for gersens Quite.

OVNDIelItW TUr yerBeHS VHIIe'
biem bar ben 16be Oft. antaset 9arer
8riitian Sanien 9omben fra Gipinopif
til 6Uritanber for @uttebjemmet. Der
bapoe melot fig "a Guissere til oenns
9olt.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

IS Spaler bar Sauseinnos quail
fanaerislfabs to 9ampitibe ianset pna
,Jslnno.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13
Tait 0 M.
tiiialas eler ttaete.

Notwithstanding. iaai'm -7ara ul1lBs. "Suy Hf
ialas", 'pustta't'-, "Eta,t, l,3.1'. -0lass ,u,,,'
oiO., sh TIA M Al ~lrora't,I Nor / Sent ~. crs 90 ,sq
saus. sHisIts s~o3taou, h gr. B]or50stao ri a
RaOH, r,au,s for ct Orb. BBritsf,u,rtr, or Re nss
'ns,s al Settling toas m, b,rfsa til
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

2ruet | fig ieip sr fort, men ulpffen
iUrIRuger bet.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

oatitr. - p'rO'o 5''l,ustaitr,s for 'rarpr,rs,
Slrat % S'HH,r. at bet ~b,Sasb, rub At 5ou'als, pot
lth' Datt,r Koruna, i,0t ben 81, Dlaril. BOB bu 81,
Drtoo't 1874 pun tSb' al stsub,6oRs. It or n
9aarot o''s Tor o. H'n 0,v'H gao. 6,r,,a iot 6r.
rene RaUH par, toOr.
sbriaiar sa'tr. siri . zo.,r
GsOarptns. Rortir 20, Wiup
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13
Stur grann | iurnes. arn So.

Stor Srano | 5urnes. Sra Sas
mar b%erettes l5oe Off,: Dmfrin9 st. IL
mot ubbrSb en- beitis Stoebrano paa
@aaroen 8ierie peO 5urues airte.
5loen ppitpo / grenssiuen % sr
muIi9ens foruoring,t pso for teri 5y'
ring.
Sra 2oen Gtuse mnatte 8eboerne
reOoe Jig Deb at taiis fig no Of @in'
ouerne; ct ~40'aarist 2~9soslem inbes
branots bog.
Saaninasbuie. Stnlb, 9aaren % en-
3arltemuitine iumt stulnsen, Der life
bar oslureret, br9note.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13
Sftcrippr9jet.

e't,rfpsrTr ~iuotal'' 5'r'i''r Jog - 5ar, a,rt, 20
Grs. On sOshaO, Z. VI. F~0r5olt11 To It Raus. r,p
Hts Tor IT On. VI Horti',H,Ht -Lstorl5s gst,s-
Iaiss ~aHtas,ts al 75,OOd III lo.Dj 5gsr uss. Ro,r.
ttsi,nsnist. Sss Ute isoiaIsB a UsaliHI Ia.lI .ai
Ssuipnt
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

lSmfo ~onifcs. - EnItes en- goo
- Smeo. Tom ttsuoeu tan 3 gre Bsparn'
ttonsarbeioe / Ira. ON ggr ~
tinaelier bow" n. ut -"s'r W.
yttnelie, ., " Gen, BlaHtarou de. Bis.
l0.2i2
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

SInRes. -BIuO8 mite8 Tom qpre.
oren9 | Ct Sa,sIma9erihoU. Norssie'
Dor Is. GATE Grpital. yti7n.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

RI, tu'O'tS 6Ieitrieitetsperf er nu fer.
nn ~, W 'ot '0ru9. Gnlasaet meb bets
s,,s, ,'S'eOe Muitiner ltal enbuer
''p,s'ao' Otrte tiIfrebsaiaenSe.
p. o'a 10 'o6eiters 2ampfjeoler. leue.
E,s !! U'Qrens meiunife gartaeb i
g,nu''a' itoIfcs 2~rioiruften til ben
6,, ,~n""''"a'tlne, IOm uopifler Gleftri.
c,a asa"s D'aiiine er ben fSrite i fit
''' 10" er ta8en i srus / @Orae.
se, -" oS'n9manS for 5rebriiHab er
so1s U ~ q. 8. M,lien. aisb.
oer9sruU blep suppleart.
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

Hnfcs. - Ggeuter mites. 5euo
Noresle mso TrimEr'e I'll Igartiu 9oba.
Jon, R~0rtbmooo, Y. BAT. liz
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13
Naeuter ouifes

oDcrati. boor 0t iHg'a b.tHu p,Hls Fan s1ss 5ariiIt
% let Et5ti1,rs BriqCtHl b,st1t3 -, Rr.n,r,
uu%Dsrrantug ''1,s o. IT isas. 5tu H3r,5is nes
5Timortttd OLEO9RAEH CO.
192052 Iaw1e-v. lEinn
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13
800 SalasmGno onJfes

Tor At irlas Irrr ior Baaroror,r. saatt Ar5roe
Setdler ugeutlIg.
The Jewell Nursery Go.
- 21t3 glis SIN. B1IHu
Decorah-posten., 1894-11-13

oEartn tiliala. - U{iu Jarm tor
- 3S5 Ncre8, 30 opplgiet, Reiteu Sauus.
gang % un9l'oU, sr titialQs. Booe Buo.
nlngrr pan Gtfuoommcr. llomurift SVrna
ltge pco 0tneoerea, % Figaligt gaHs-t aap,
re9GnGen. SeitQBrHOe "a g2il fro Gtco.
rab pad BeeH Ill Burr cat 900 glaos
ipr CT SuiOoH un0gr nupRrcHoe "gfulct.
3atu". GteUbommen fan irlgrs unoer ct
eler 2 e1er 3 Dele, U}lu h]sUeu6er ia TT
Sacob Saas, Der Dor pua zlrosi. 10
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
WINTER SONG.

Bing me a song OF tho dead world,
OF the great frost deep and still,
Ofthe sword OF fire the wind hurled
On the iron hill.
Bling me a song OF the driving snow,
! or the reeling cloud and the smoky drift
Whore the sheeted wraiths like ghosts go
Through the gloomy rift.
Sing me song of the ringing blade,
OF the snarl and shatter the light ict
makes,
OF the whoop and the swing of the snow.
shoe raid
Through the cedar brakes.
Sing me song of the apple-loft,
OF the corn and the nuts and the mounds
of meal,
OF the sweeping whir ofthe spindle soft,
And the spinninS-wheel.
Sing me song Of the open page,
Where the rujdy CLEANS of the Hrelight
dance,
Where bends my love Armitage,
Reading an oil romance.
Sing me a song of the still nights,
OF the large stars steady and high
The aurora darting its phosphor lights
In the purple sky.
Duncan Campbell Scott, in Scribner.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
Checkers In the Street.

Checkers seem to have as great q
fascination for the longshoreman as
they have for the country storekeeper,
only the longshoreman plays without
checker board or checkers. That is,
he hasn't regular outfit. Of course
he has to have some sort sort of outfit,
but this he makes himself. You can
see him any day along West street, or
Front, or Washington, at the noon
hour, absorbed in the game.
He takes a platform against which
wagons back, and chalks out on its
floor a checker-board, making each
alternate square very white with chalk
and leaving the others blank. For
checkers one side uses grains of corn
and the other beans or white pebbles
it depends on where the game is
played. And they go on at the game
with all the energy and absorbing in.
terest their big bodies can command.
Sometimes you see twenty couples
in one block eager over the contest.
They play well, too, for long practice
has made them perfect, and small
stake adds to the excitement of the
play. The loser usually has to pay for
the glass of mixed ale that every long
shoreman wants with his midday lunch.
They have champions among them,
too, and when these big players are
pltted there is always crowd to look
on and applaud. But, OF course, every
reader has seen all this for himself
New York World.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
WISE WORDS.

The breath of prayer comes from
the life of faith.
1t is laziness of mind which takes
away the taste for good books.
The blue heaven is larger than all
the clouds IN it, and much more last
ing.
Liberality consists less in giving
much than in giving at the right mo-
ment.
One seldom repents of having said
too little, often of having said too
much.
A man is born for great things
when he has the strength to conquer
himself.
Nothing else is so pleasant as a good
and beautiful soul; it shows itself in
every action.
Modesty is to merit what shading is
to the figures in a picture; it gives it
force and expression.
What is mere glorious than to be
conquered, or rather to be willing to
be conquered by the truth.
Perhaps to suffer is nothing else than
to live moro deeply. Love and sor-
row are the two conditions of pro.
found life.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

A weather prophet, named A. J.
Devoe, of Zingsem, N. J., predicted
last spring an extremely dry summer.
His own faith in his prediction in
duced him to plant potatoes on the
edge of swamp, where at planting
time the water was all around them.
In ten weeks after he was eating new
potatoes of good size, while all his
neighbors' potatoes were burned mp
by drought. But that prognostication
Of the future, observes the American
Cultivator, is not valuable to a man
who did not happen to have a swamp
to plant potatoes in. The practical
knowledge that does most good is to
know how to deepen soil and cultivate
it 80 that good crops can be grown
Independent of the character of the
season.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

husband was the Vicar of your old
parish-you remember him and me. I
was left with little income of about
two hundred year. Twelve months
ago L was persuaded, in order to
double my incomes thing which
seemed certain from the prospectus
to invest everything in a new and rich
gold mine. Everything. And the
mine has never paid anything. The
company-it is called the Rynard Gold
Reef Company-is in liquidation be-
cause, though there is really the gold
there, it costs too much to get it. 1
have no relatives anywhere to help me.
Unless cnn get assistance my chill
dren and I must go at once-to-mor-
row-into the workhouse. Yes, we
are paupers. l am ruined by the cruel
lies of that prospectus, and the wicked
ness which deluded me, and l know
not how many others, out of my
money. l have been foolish, and am
punished. But those people, who will
punish them? Help me, if you can,
my dear Reginald. Oh, for Gods sake
help my children and me. Help your
mothers friend, your own old friend"
'This," said Rosie, meditatively,
sis exactly the kind of thing to make
Reggie uncomfortable. Why, it might
make him unhappy all day. Better
burn it" She dropped the letter into
the fire. "He's an impulsive, emo
tional nature, and he doesn't under
stand the city. If people are SO fool
ish. What lot of fibs the poor old
pater does tell, to be sure. He's
regular novelist-Oh here you are,
you lazy boy! !"
'Kiss me, Rosie" He looked as
handsome as Apollo and as cheerful.
81 wish all the world were as happy as
you and me. Heighol Some poor
wretches, Tn afraid"
Tea or coffee, Reg?"-Londo,
Strand.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
A Double Fish.
Strand.

A double fish, or rather two fishes
joined together by growth similar to
the connection between the Siamese
twins, was caught at Creve Coeur Lake
recently under peculiar circumstances.
William Schaefer, of the Grand Bill
lard Hall, and his friend Billie Ben
nett, before going on fishing trip to
Creve C9ur, made a friendly wager,
by the terms of which the one who had
the least success should, on their re-
turn, entertain the other at a dinner.
The score stood fifty-one to fifty in
Billie's favor, when Schaefer's line
tautened and he landed jack salmon.
On examining the fish he WINS astound-
ed to learn that his catch was freak.
There were two fishes, perfect in every
way, between Fhom there was a
growth which bound them together.
The growth was just below the gills.
THAT ties us, said Bennett.
81 guess not" Schaefer replied.
81 have two fishes here. This makes
me fifty-two to your fifty one"
"But you only caught one, argued
Bennett.
''How's that? l caught them both, -"
urged Schaefer.
"Hod" Stevens, the superintendent
of the lake, was asked to decide
whether the piscatorial dual should be
counted as a unit or more. Stevens
listened to the arguments of both and
acknowledged his inability to satisfy
them on the point, and suggested that
the matter be left to old John Morgan,
who had been a fisherman at Creve
C1ur Lake since 40. Morgan, after
hearing both sides, decided in Schas-
fer's favor.
"But," said Bennett, eve were
only to count fish caught with hook.
Now, only one of these fish bit at the
halt. The hook was only in one
fish's mouth.
Snakes no difference. Tother ones 9
hooked on to the one Schaefer hooked
and he won. st Louis Republic.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

The so-called Russian thistle, which
has become such pest in the North
western States, is not properly this
tie at all, but an annual, nearly allied
TO the saltworts. 1t has done more
than 1900, 900 damage to the crops
last year. 1t was accidentally intro
duced seventeen years ago, in some
fiaxseed imported from Russia by a
man in Scotland, South Dakota. II
is estimated that it will cost fully 80,
600, 900 to eradicate it, and the New
York Tribune learns that the Depart
ment of Agriculture has been ap
pealed to to take the matter in hand
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

The New York Financial Chronicle,
a leading paper of its class, thinks
that better times are ahead. 1t says
"Slow but evident progress appears to
be making towards the revival of our
industries. Every Indication con-
tinues as favorable as could be ex.
pected. The close of the year is al
ways the quiet season. Work, too, il
many and prominent departments can,
not start up again before spring opens
Notable instances are the building
trade, which received such serious
back during the summer and fall
and railroad expenditures, which were
at the same time contracted within the
smallest possible compass. These de-
partments of our activities relate to
operations which cover T. vast field of
enterprise, touching very manv
trades, and yet but little new move
ment in them can be anticipated for
several months. In face of these facts
there have been undoubted signs of
an increased movement of iron.
especially in the Wec., with better
tone in the markets The demand for
general merchandise, too, is also
widening"
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
A LOVERS MIsCALouLATToN.

'1'll take this seventy -ive-cent bot
tie of perfume if you will take off this
cost mark and put on enc with so
on it, said young man to the clerk
in drug store.
GAN right"
1t was done.
'Great bead" soliloquized the
young man. "Minnie will notice that
cost mark and love me for spending
my substance so literally for her. It
never hurts young mans chances for
the object of his admiration to think
he regards her worth getting the very
best for"
The bottle of perfume was sent, and
an evening or two later the donor
called in person and casually proposed
marriage.
'James," said the girl.
"What is it, Minnie, denr?"
"You sent me bottle of perfume 2"
"Yes. Did you like it?"
"It was good perfume, James, but
it wasn't worth any dollar and half.
Seventy-five cents is the regular price
for that perfume, and / can't say that
l have much use for a young man who
is so careless of his money as to pay
for an article twice what it is worth. !"
but, Minnie"
James was going to explain, but on
second thought he refrained. 1t oc-
CURED to him that girl might like
him less for deceiving her than for ex-
travagance. SO he put on his hat and
departed, resolving to try differeut
tactics when he found another girl
Harper's Bazaar.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

The English sparrows have proved n
nuisance in the cotton country, for as
soon as the pods open they pick out
the cotton AMI carry it off, and some
planters have lost, as they claim, hum
dreds of pounds in this way. There is
one man, however, on the Mississippi
that has not lost much, relates the
Chicago Herald. When he found the
sparrows were committing depreda-
tions he procured a quantity of wheat
soaked il in sweetened whisky. and
strewed it along the rows. The spar
rows found it and thought they had A
picnic. So they had, but io fifteen OF
twenty minutes there was the tipsiest
lot of English sparrows ever seen on
the face of this earth. They rolled
about on the ground, falling on their
sides and backs, kicking their heels
into the air like parcel of drunkards,
all the while uttering the most comical
squeaks. They did not have long to
squeak however, for the boys gathered
them up and threw them into bags
The first day they gathered two bushels
of drunken sparrows. Three or four
days later the experiment was repeat.
ed with almost equal success, and from
time to time since. They made excel.
lent potpie, but the survivors have
evidently come to regard the planta.
ton as hoodooed, for now very few
come about it.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
A Curious Coptic Sleeping Custom.

The Coptic patriar;h of Aiexandria
is never allowed to sleep more than
fifteen minutes at any one time, and
if the attendant should allow the holy
ones nap to extend beyond the allotted
time the penalty is decapitation. Upon
being aroused at the end of each quar-
ter hour the Patriarch arises AMI
spreads his rug upon the floor, kneels
upon it. bows his head three times to
the east and then again retires. st.
Louis Republic.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

The macadamizing of a piece of
road in Ohio increased the value of
the adjoinining farms S4.5O an acre,
while the cost was less than 81 an
acre. The American Cultivator thinks
that some one ought to go all through
the country preaching the gospel of
good roads.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

A London city magnate who daily
drives to his place of business has a
phonograph in his carriage into which
he pours messages, short letters, in.
structions and other matters of i'm
portance. When he alights the ma
chine is handed to the head clerk and
he takes his instructions from it,.
Both the telegraph and the telephone
are about to encounter new rival in
the telantogrsph-an instrument for
transmitting messages in handwriting
by means of electricity. New York
Herald.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
A New Kind of Cushion.

Confidence cushions" are the pill.
lows that stand in corner near the
fireplace when they are not in use,
ana that afford resting place when in
use, for the lowly individual who likes
TO SIT at his friends feet. They are
oig' square and lless, covered with
denim or mohair plush. New York
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
An Aged Doctor.

, Dr. Frederick Andres, of Mitchell,
south Dakota, claims to be the first
authorized practitioner of medicine in
tne immense region west of the Miss
issippl and north of the Missouri. He
Is native of Massachusetts, is now
nearly nlnety-one years old, and set.
tied In Dubuque in 1884.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
THE MERRY SIDE OF,LlFE;
WORRIES THAT ARE TOLD BY\THE,
FUNNY MEN OF THE PRESS. "a !

sticky, But Not Wanted Ito
hnow Very Self-complacent- -
Most Decidedly, Etc. Etc.
She loved him very tenderly, ~
:, He loved her not Bit
Yet fate decreed that on tbis niybt
They side by side should sit.
say something sweet. dear" said tho maid :
ca ana through her colored glasses =,
She eyed him fondly as he breathed
The single -"Molasses ~
Boston Budget. /
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
NOT AN UNUSUAL HEAD.

Young Officer Ito veteran) )-"Isn't t
it peculiar that when first graduated
L wore n number seven and "a half for
age cap, the next one was n seven and
a-quarter, and now wear II seven?"
Veteran-'Not at all have often
seen young graduates of the military
academy affected in that way
Judge.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

The Commissioner of Indian affairs
advocates the instruction of Indian
women in household duties, Bucks
receive education in the trades, but
the women receive little attention.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

Mistress What kinl of pies are
these, COOKE"
Cook Some av 'en is appul an
some is mince."
Mistress But l told you to mark
them SO they could be told apart; and
they are all marked II. NJ ;"
Cook-".oo they be, mum 'Tis
mince' an faint mince. '"-Judee.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
THE PRoMONToRIEs.

"The promontories of the ladies this
tall are quite striking"
''Promontories? What mean you?"
"Why, simply the high capes they
are wearing. Isn't high cape pro-
montory?"
And then they rounded the horn.
Brooklyn Standard Union.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
OVERHEARD IN THE OFFICE.

'1m not fond of scrapping," said
the desk sponge, during a midday
silence, 'but I'm compelled to do a
good deal o. licking nowadays for the
boss.
eyes, returned the mucilage bottle,
"and he calls on me every now and
then to paste something in the back. :"
Truth.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
THE RYNARD GOLD REEF
COMPANY, LIMITED.
BY WALTER BESANT.

OU dear old
boy said the
girl, 81 n m
sure | wish it
could be with
all my heart
if l have any
heart.
"I don't be
lieve y o IL
have" replied
the boy, gloom
lily.
HWe11 hui
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

Mr.. Bings-"Did Mrs. Nextdoor say
Miss Upton refused me?"
Mrs. Bings-"No, she merely re-
marked that Miss Upton had always
been very sensible girl. New York
Weekly.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
THE GREATEST PHYsIc1AN-LovE.

Mr.. Faiute-" Miss Rosalie, j un-
derstand that you have been attending
tie lectures on How to Treat Ordinary
Illnesses?"
She-"Yes.
He drawing nearer) "Can-can
you tell me what you would do for a
broken heart ?"-Vogue.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
SURE.

green Christmas makes fat
graveyard, they say. hope this one
will be white"
"A green Christmas NAV make q fat
graveyard, but I'll tell you something
that both green and a white Christ.
mas make lean."
whats that?"
Your pocketbook. - Rrovuins'.
Monthly.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

Lady Ito polite laborer who has of
fered her his seat -"Oh, no! Keep
your seat, my good man; you have
been working hard all day"
Polite Laborer (sympathetically)- -
''Take it. Ma'am. Thrue, Owe bin
carryin' tn hod all TIL day but you'v We
bin shoppin'. Puck.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

The only instrument used purely
for punishment in English jaIls now
adays is crank handle weighted
heavily with lead and working heavily
inside a box.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
VERY sELF-coMPI AGENT.

Flora Fairchild (of Philistia)-
''Beauty's not everything, Mr.. Daffo-
dill it generally makes people vain. /"
Narcissus DalfoIil (poet) II don't
think I'm vain, Miss Fairchild. -
Boston Budget.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
THE REIGN OF THE SHORT STORY.

Are you fond of short stories?'
asked Binx.
no." replied Bank. 'I hear too
many of them. Nearly everybody ]
meet wants to borrow money of me, "
Washington Star.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15

The Supreme Court of Missouri has
decided that the law which provides
for the selling of vagrants' labor at
auction is unconstitutional.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
WANTED To KNOW.

(which would you rather be, ,
Knave or fool?" asked Idioticus.
~ don't know" replied 'Cynicus
What has been your experience ?"-
Judge.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
WHAT THE WORLD AWAITS.

1nventor-"Well, l think my for
tunes made if l succeed in what L m at
now."
Friend-"What are you trying to
invent?"
Inventory non-explosive, un-
loaded pistol. Puck.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
THE MAIDEN's PRAYER.

"All flesh is grassl" shouted the
minister.
Keep off the grass" prayed the
girl who had a perfect horror of get.
ling fat. Puck.
Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1894-01-15
MOST DECIDEDLY,

Jinks-'I don't believe that n critic
reads half of the authors books he
criticises.
Binks-"The author is more con-
siderate. He reads every word of the
critics criticism. Puck.