The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1894-02-13

fur de past five Vars I have called
speshul attenshun to dat bylaw. On
three different occasions members hev
bin expelled fur breakin dat rule. In
spite of all dat have been said an dun,
howeber, de two members befo' nae
hev bin guilty not only of breakin de
rule, but of tryin to break each others
heads. Brudder Jackson, what yo' got
to say fur yo'self9"
II said dat Eve had red ha'r, sah."
''Brudder Johnson, what yo' got to
say9"
II said she didn't hev."
can dat precipitated a mortal com
BATE"
Yes, sah."
"Befo' de mortal combat was pre-
cipitated, howeber, boat of yo' called
each other liars and boss thieves an
robbers?"
The guilty pair bowed their heads in
acknowledgment.
"Brudder jackson, did yo' cher see
Eve9'
mo, sah."
Did 20, Brudder Johnson?"
mo, sah."
kin either one O. yo' pint me to
any description givin de color O. her
hare"
They mumblingly acknowledged their
inability to do so.
Now o' ha'arken to me- !" exclaimed
the president as he drew himself up
and emphasized his words with ex-
tended arm. DE verdict am dat boat
| of yo' be bounced. out O. dis club fo'with
right of-wid in a minit-an dat
under 70 circumstances will yo' be re-
stored to membership! Ize gwine to
put a stop to dis sort O. bizness if 1
hev to bounce cherry member Of de
Limekiln club an run Paradise hall all
alone! De ideah of two ole gray
headed niggers wastin DER breaf ober
de color Of de ha'r of a woman who
libed thousands of var agol Who
knows whether her ha'r was red,
black, white or pea greene Who keers3
How you gwine to find out if yo' do
keer9"
please, ~sah"-began Brother Jack
son as he looked up.
''Silence!' Numbered the president.
Muffin yo' kin say will change my
decishun! I want all members of dis
club to thoroughly understand de po-
sishun of affairs befo' we drop dis sub
lick. Oar was an Adam an an Eve.
Dey resided in de Ga'den Of Eden.
Eve tempted Adam, an dey had to
move. OATS plenty dat's all we want
to kno. We doan' keer 2 cents how
tall dey war, how much dey weighed
or what was de size of DER feet.
Oar was a food. Noah built an
ark an 6oated aroun an was saved.
We choke off right dar. We doan'
keer whether he was married or single
white or black-tall OF short. We
doan' keer whether it rained fo'ty
days or only thirty nine an a half.
"Cain killed his brudder Abel wild a
club. It's none O. u bizness to ak
whether dat club was of oak or hickory
whether de KILN took place Monday
mornin or Wednesday evenin. We
doan' keer whether it was outdoahs ~
in de house.
"Dan1 was cast into a den of lions.
Mebbe dar was two lion-mebbe six.
Mebbe dem lions was hungry-mebbe
not. Day didn't want no fuss Wild
Danl. Why dey didn't am none o
our b;zness. All we keer fur am dat
DanI got out all right.
Jonah was swallowed by a whale
an cast up agin. Was it a small whale
or a big one9 Was he black or white9
Was he waitin dar to swaller Jonah,
or did he Just happen long at de right
minitQ None O our bizness! All we
keer fur is dat he was cast out agln.
Dis am whar l stand, gemlen, an
whar l shall continue to stand, an SIGH
as can't stand wild me kin take o wall F.
Brudders Jackson and Johnson, y"'
kin make yo'selves skass! Git out an
stay out! Yo' can't come ere no mo!
If, in gwine down de alley together,
one of you declars dat Job had chll-
blains stead of biles, an de odder calls
him a liar an gifts up a fight, it won't
be muffin to dis club, and nobody VIII
interfere. We will now blow out De
lamps an prognosticate homeWards."