The herald., 1894-09-23
UNFEELING WOMEN.
MANY WHO ARE so CALLED ARE
GROSSLY Misunderstood.

| Women Whom the Present Generation
Not Understand Them-The Other Type
of Woman Who Is Always Affable.
A witty and sympathetic man once
said to me, ~ would rather marry
woman who looked feelings and had
mono than woman who had feelings
and looked none OF course tho say
ing camo moro from his wit than his
sympathy, but could not help feeling
that there were moments when / could
agree with him, although 1 have known
the value and the services Of the woman
with no feelings to be underestimated.
My daughters have friend--a wom-
an only little past girlhood--whose
company is more sought after and rel
ished than that Of almost any one l
know She has admirers by the score and
acquaintances everywhere, and no won
der, for she is cultivated, always cheer
full and will listen to and rally the poor
est talker. She is asked to everything
in the shape Of feast, for she is tho
amusement and relaxation Of whoever
may be about her. at the same time,
whenever her praises are sounded, the
eulogy winds up with the inevitable and
disheartening tag after all, you know.
she has no feelings"
And this is perfectly true. Quick and
comprehending as is her smile aud
graceful as is her glance while one is
talking to her, thcro is always the con-
viction that not trace of real interest
is involved. If she only had heart,
the girl would be an angel.
1 like the old fashioned word. And
when l have been alone with her I have
often wanted to say, my dear, do be
an angelo But tshe has no heart. II she
were to marry q foreigner and so abroad
to live, she would leave us all without
moments regret. So her friends are
vexed with her want of feeling and
warn the world against her.
And this is what seems to me unjust.
Take this girl as she is. Whether it
is her nature or not, she never refuses
the challenge to be agreeable; whatever
her own plans and likings are, she never
betrays impatience when they arc
crossed. Her companion may be plain,
awkward and tiresome but her eye and
her gay little joke are never dulled for
that reason. In fine, she may be the in
carnation of tho light which shines, but
does not warm, yet while she keeps a
whole circle in good humor by her wit,
as she does, it is poor return to gird
at her.
Again, and speaking now of widely
different type, can call to mind older
women, often only the survivors of
more'rigid era-exaet, severe. stern, IN
bending and ruling their households
withaa rod of iron. How little this gen
erafipn understands theml How little
merit it ALLOWS to the implicit faith i'll
duty, the uhkring devotion to work, the
almost fagatsc hatred of waste and self
indulgeTicesand the Spartan maxims Of
life iniyyhieh they were brought up and
-,vhiois, tl,e..,A s4ill esserve.- What has be-
come of our dyes that we cannot see the
beauty of suSh lives? Why do we no
isAgsf recognize their value? These are
nHS SHle women who have feelings, but
looElhone Theyare without feelings at
all, according to the standards of our
new, diversified and exacting society.
hear. young girls saying that their
grandmothers OF aunts, or what you
please, don't understand them, and
really think that many older people
than these schoolgirls make just tho
same absurd complaint can appeal
with safety to every one. Who has not
known one of these same stern women
II. - H. L.
powers Of Nursing, or confront single
handed and maintain her family on
beggar's .pittance, or save falling
household by simple economy and hard
work? 1 shall be told that all these
things are admitted, but that is just the
point-they are not. If they were the
cry of ''no feelings" would never be
raised, out of very shame.
know an old lady who has had the
misfortune to live long life and to see
all her descendants grow up unable to
understand" her. She is of the old,
unsparing sort, and they, artistic, orig
inal, clever, modern people, have no
place for her either in their theories or
their interests. With these her notions
can scarcely be expected to agree either,
yet the complaints come not from her,
but from them. They are not complaints
in words. They arc complaints crystal
lized into entire disregard for the old
school, which does not, as it cannot,
wholly sympathize with them. 1t seems
to take an outsider, like myself, to see
what do see-that without this erect,
white haired ancestress, who is appar-
entity SO separate from them all, wives
and husbands both would have to teach
| themselves the fortitude which she COM
municates merely by her presence.
Their households would be dragging on
without the strong axles, SO to speak,
which she put in almost unnoticed for
each newly married couple, and the
whole family, now held together in an
unusual vigor, would soon fall apart
and be dispersed.
believe there must be many such
cases. I have the deepest respect for
these strong, unbending characters who
do not conceal their utter intolerance of
our self centered modern methods. =
May Johnstone in Ladies Home Jour-
| nal