Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-02-22
the Surgeons Miracle
Joseph Kirkland in the Westminster
Budget.
poor Abe DOdgel'

That's what they called him. though
he wasn't any poorer than other folks
not so poor as some. How could he be
poor. work as he did and steady as he
was? Worth a whole grist of such
bait as his brother, Ephe Dodge, and
yet they never called Ephe poor-what-
ever worse name they might call him.
When Ephe was off at a show in the
village. Abe was following the pillow.
driving a straight furrOw, though you
wouldn't have thought it to e the
way his nose pointed. In Winter,
when Ephe was taking the girls to
singing school or spelling bee OF some
other foOlishness-out till after 9 o'clock
at night, like as notable was hanging
over the fire. holding a book so the
light would shine, first on one page and
then on the other, and he turning his
head as he turned the book, and read
ing first with one eye and then with the
other.
There, the murders out! Abe couldn't
read with both eyes at once. If Abe
looked straight ahead he couldn't see
the furrow-nOr anything else for that
matter. His best friend couldn't say
but what Abe Dodge was the cross
eyedest cuss that ever was. Why, if
you wanted to see Abe you'd stand in
front of him; but if you wanted Abe to
see you you'd got to stand behind him.
or pretty near it. Homely? Well. if
you mean downright "humbly,' that's
what he was. When one eye was in
use the other was out of sight, all eX-
cept the white of it. Humbly amt no
name for it. The girls used to say he
had to wake up in the night to rest his
face, it was so humbly. In school
you'd ought to have seen him look down
at his copybook. He had to can't his
head clear over and cock up his chin
till it pointed out of the winder and
down the road. You'd really ought to
nave seen him, you'd have died. Head
Of the class, too, right along; just as
near to the head as Ephe was to the
foot; and that's sayin' a good deal.
But to see him at his desk! he looked
for all the worlG like a Week-old chick
en- peekin' at a tumble-bug. And him
q grown man, too. for he stayed to
school Winters so long as there was
anything more the teacher could teach
him.. o see, there wasn't anything to
draw him away; no girl wouldn't look
at h~m-lucky, too, seem the way he
looked.
Well one term there was d new teach
er c~erne-regular high-up girl. down
from Chicago. AS bad luck would have
it, Abe wasn't at school the first week
hadn't got through his Fall work. SO
she got to know all the scholars, and
they was awful tickled with her
everybody always was that knowed
her. The first day she come i'm and saw
Abe at his desk, she thought he was
squrntin' fer fun, and she upped and
laughed right out. Some of the schol-
ars laughed, too, at first; but most of
en-, to do 'em justice, was a Ieetle
took back; young as they was, and
cruel by nature. young folks is most
usually always cruel-don't seem to
know no 'better.0
Well, right in the middle of the hush,
Abe gathered up his books and upped
n walked outdoors, looking ahead of
him, and consequently seeing the hand
some young teacher u~nbeknown to her.
She was the worst cut up you ever
did see; but what could she do or say:
Go and tell him she thought he was
making up a face for fun? The girls
do say that come noon-speH, when she
found out about it, she cried-just fair
" cried. Then she tried to be awful
nice to Abe's ornery brother, Ephe, and
Ephe he was licked most to death; but
that didn't do Abe any good-Ephe
was just ornery enough to take care
that Abe shouldn't get any comfort out
of it. They DO say she sent messages
70 Abe, and Ephe delivered them,
or else twisted zem so as to make things
worse and verse. Mebbe so, mebbe
not-Ephe was ornery enough for it.
Course the school-ma'am she was
boardin' round, and pretty soon it come
time to go to OF man Dodge's, and she
went; but no Abe could she ever see.
He kept away, and as to meals. he
never set by, but took a bite off by him
self when he could get a chance.
CCourse his mother favored him, being
LIT was 81 CuSStu uulucky.), lneU
when the folks was all to bed, he'd
come in and poke up the fire and peek
into his book, but first one side and
then the other, same as ever.
Now, what does schoolma'am do but
come down n night when she ought
to be abed and asleep, and catch him
unawares. Abe knOwed it was her as
quick as he I I'd the rustic of her
dress, but there wasn't no help for it.
so he Just turned his head away and
covered his crOsS-eyes with his hands.
and she pitched in. What she said ]
don't know. but Abe he never said a
word: only told her he didn't blame her
not a mite; he knew she couldn't help
it-no mor than he could. Then she
asked him to come back to school, and
he answered to please excuse him.
After a bit she asked him if he
wouldn't come to oblige her. and he
said he calculated he was obligin' her
more by stayin' away.
Well. come to that, she didn't know
what to say Dr. do, so. woman-like, she
upped and cried; and then said he hurt
her feelings. And the upshot of it
was he said he'd come, and they shook
hands on it.