The Lebanon express. (Lebanon, Linn County, Or.) 1887-1898, 1894-04-27
A DAYS JAUNT,


loo at the prohi' convention, the "hig
guns' Of our little, but awful village,
resolved that it was duty they owed
the would-be officers or candidates
that they should be allowed to spend
one Sabbath in prayer, fasting or in
any way they desired in peace, pre-
pairing for the trust which would be
forced upon them.
Loading themselves with the fat of
the land Including the infant Water
looites) and led by the notorious police
judge and Fred Gross, one ofour rising
young business men, with schoolmams
and undergraduates, ct cetera, the
DEVOTED band looked the genuine Cox.
ey's army Qhe only difference being
they carried their supplies with them)
and leaving their friends to care for
the stranger, on the calm and silent
Sunday, April %, set their face Zion
ward, or in other language, "Seda"-
wards. BY recruits along the way we
numbered, on reaching Pizgah's Mount
that overlooks Sodaville, q souls, not
counting 54 soles that seemed to be the
largest part of our party.
At this point a spy-glass or opera
glass was brought into requisition and
one of the party did claim they saw u
man on the streets, but the writer saith.
not. On reaching a point where we
could stop council was held and
our band dissolved and, greater part,
be it said to their credit, went ell masse
and ON foot to hear Rev. Plowman and
the Bass Viol discourse OH theological
subjects, while the roughs of the gang
tried to find place six feet square to
rest their weary bones. Failing to find
this they amused themselves with the
view from the spring. Right here let
us add that it is a splendid view and
the only fault we found was that after
drinking a gill of the mineral water
our brain seemed to reel by looking
down from that awful height
The sermon came to close earlier
than we had supposed, but a gentle
man explained the reason, said the
clocks could not run the land was so
much on the edgewise order, and
everything was done by guess. We
guess that is the reason there are so
few males in the village. They were
out having u "time,n as we only saw
! some half dozen and they seemed to
be hayseeds or populists, we can't dis
tinguish the sex, or they may be taking
one of those all-curing baths we have
read of. One thing we did note, they
all have weak eyes and have to wear
smoked glass spectacles. But little
imp who accompanied us spied out the
reason by watching young lady who,
as soon as had come down from the
Mount, handed her glasses to another
who Immediately went up the hill.
He says it is done to prevent the dizzi-
ness we have spoken of.
Our party of cutters adjourned to the
public school grounds to dine that the
children of the poor could feast the
next day on the crumbs and chicken
bones that fell from the cloth of the
rich. The place is in deplorable state
of barbarity, as it seems a famine will
soon overtake the town, judging from
the schoolhouse yards we have been
forced to enter in our girlhood days.
The reason of our deductions is this
We saw no ants, and where an ant
can't exist how dc the people grow
fat.
After partaking of food such as
Waterloo alone can produce, we hied
ourselves to Bro. Eichler's in a body
and were well repaid for all our hare.
ships by view of his beautiful green.
house and flowers. Then the ladies'
out of curiosity, took in the town from
the spring to the livery stable and the
most entrancing sight they saw was
our future coroner, DR.. Prill
The band of our sister town is good
Without tlattering in the least we viii
say they do well for amateurs. Tht
few pieces they played for our edifica
tion were well rendered and duly
appreciated, and boys, note this, W.
| will have you July 4 if no other more
greedy town gets you first.
Homeward we turn, but alas! OH thu
summit we beheld sight that tool
the wind out of our sails so quickly w
collapsed like Wlted dish-clOth. TIT
gentleman who wore the glasses vii
! recognize our handiwork and vii
know the writer but under the circum
stances we hardly think he will peach
At last we reach our own bursteC
boom and seek our downy couch, mucl
pleased with ourselves, the eommunit!
Sndaville and all mankind. But sIicl