davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
Four Curious Epitaphs.

"Arthur G. writes to the New York
Press es follows; In recent issue of
the Press find several curious epitaphs
Two of them l think your correspond
ent has changed little or else re-
ceived an imperfect copy of the orig
inals. The first, which is inscribed on
a tombstone in the Isle of Wight,
should read:
To the memory of Martha Gwynn,
Who was so pure and clean within
She cracked the outer shell OF skin
And Matched herself a cherubim.
The last one as presented by Mr.
Harrison is more perfect in rhythm
than the original, which reads as fol-
lows:
Beneath this sod, in hopes of heaven,
Lies tho landlord ofth Lion;
His son sticks to the business still,
Resigned unto his fathers will.
Having interested myself lin younger
days. in collecting curious examples
of churchyard poetry, l might add to
the list two of which perhaps the fol-
lowing is the most peculiar:
Father and mother and
Chose to be buried asunder
And lie buried yonder.
A neighboring county furnishes the
following epitaph, which proves the
"woman's rights movement" is not of
recent origin, but was in full force in
the rural districts of England even in
the early part of the last century:
Here lies the man Richard
And Mary, his wife,
Their surname was Pritchard
And they lived without strife;
But the reason was plain.
They abounded in riches,
They no care had, nor pain,
And the wife wore the brooches.
Would not our modern cemeteries
"Forests of Marble" be more interest
ing if there was little more variety
in the legends which tell of the virtues
of the dead, even though our obituary
poets should be compelled to gather a
little inspiration from their illustrious
predecessors
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
WISE WORDS.
An extremist is always a misft.

An extremist is always o misft.
Money is not the measure Of merit.
Love is natural product of human
ity.
A woman has no use for a dumb
Cupid,
Possession is pursuit with the pith
punched out.
Epigrams are diamonds in the gravel
of conversation.
There are people who can get drunk
from excitement
People with nerve enough to lead
never lack followers.
Slyness is the only vice that does
not write itself upon the face.
The harder a woman's heart works
the less liable it is to go on strike,
Even a witticism has to depend
on appropriateness for appreciation.
1t is seldom that mans desires do
not keep week or two in advance of
his income.
Neglect of triAes is more of an indi-
cation of a weak character that
strong one.
"a good shape is in the sheers'
mouth" and good fit is all in the
needles eye.
No human being has a moral right
to dress out of harmony with the gen.
eral sense of the community.
Women fall into errors from emo
tion, while men are more often moved
in the wrong direction by vanity.
A woman can do a wrong twice as
quick as a man can, but it takes her
hundred times as long to forget it.
1t is mistake to endow a man with
imaginary capabilities. He knows no
more than is shown by his works.
If you wish to keep your friend you
must laugh at his jokes, but you are
not bound to hear his stories twice.
A suspicious man is occasionally
useful, but it is in the same sense that
boils are said to be conducive to
health.
One of the things that cut into ones
self esteem is to find that cherished
secret has been public property for
months.
Some people love each other for what
they think they are, and some people
love each other without thinking any
thing about it.
Make allowance for the follies of
youth and hope for the best. The cat,
the gravest of all animals, is the most
frisky when young.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
The Sandwich Man.

The London sandwich men are dis.
tinct class peculiar to the great metro
polls. They are the peripatetis who
advertise the latest novelties in thea
tres or wardrobes, and they spend
their lives, so to speak, between the
boards. They are for the most part,
broken. down folk, who have lost other
employment through evil habits; but
there are some of better class who
are thoroughly respectable and trust
worthy, They are selected by bill
posting agencies, which make busi-
ness of supplying employers, and the
applications are always in excess Of
the demand. A general election is al
ways a time of harvest 10 the sandwich
men. In London at Parliamentary
election as many MS a hundred of them
have been employedby each candidate,
and an instance is mentioned by the
Graphic where teach side sedulously
sought to make the sandwich men who
were proclaimiug the virtues of the
opposition candidate digracefully
drunk. Both sides succeeded, and
two hundred drunken sandwich men
were on exhibition that day in the con-
stituency, to the amusement of the frIv'
olous aud the horror of the serious
minded among the lieges. The pay
on election days is doubled, aud hence
If four hundred men are required at
least eight hundred can be had. A
nobleman, a member of an old British
family, recently won wager by pa
rading Picadilly as a sandwich man,
dressed in a shabby coat aul battered
hat. Frank Leslie's Weekly.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
RArHs or ADvERrIsIno,
AT PLAY.

Play that you arc mother dear
And play that papa is your beau;
Play that we sit in the corner here,
Just as we nsed to, long ago.
Playing so, we lovers two,
Are just as happy as we can be,
And III say 81 love YOU" to you
And you say "I love you"to mel
III love YOU we both shall say,
AL in earnest and all In play.
Or, play that you are the other one
That some time came, and went away;
And play that the light Of years agoue
Stole into my heart again to-day!
Playing that you are the one 1 knew
In the days that never again may be,
I'll say ~ love you" to you
And you say II love you to mel
II love you + my heart shall say
To the ghost OF the past come backto-dsy J
Or, play that you sought this nesting place
For your own sweet self, with that dual
guise
Ofyour pretty mother in your face
And the look OF that other in your eyesl
So the dear old loves shall live anew
As 1 hold my darling on my knee,
And I'll say "I love you" to you
And you say ~ love you" to me!
Oh, many strange true thing we say
And do when we pretend to play
Chicago Record
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

Jennie Greek, ten years old, and liv-
ing at Muckford, Indiana, has reason
to be very proud and her friends have
good cause to be proud of her, and with
out doubt are SO. While Jennie was
walking along the railroad track near
her home last summer, she discovered
that trestle across n deep ravine was
on fire, and she knew that a train bear.
ing aload of passengers for the Worlds
Fair would soon be along. With Won
derful presence of mind the child ran
TO meet the train, and tagging it with
her apron brought it to a stop. There
were many French passengers on
board, and on their return home they
reported to their Government the con-
duct of the child. And SO Jennie
Greek has just received as reward for
her courage and presence of mind the
medal of the Legion of Honor.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

1t is hard, admits the New York In.
dependent, for an old-fashioned far
mer on an isolated farm to bring himself
to believe in the widespread preya-
lence of tuberculosis among cattle, and
still harder for him to realize that ia.
tai germs. that will eventually carry
OFF tender infants, can hide themselves
in the innocent looking milk. But not
so very long ago dairy, not far from
New York City, was suspected of the
infection. Specimens of milk from
twelve out of twenty-five COWS were
found to contain tubercle bacilli, and
portions of this milk were injected
with thorough aseptie proportions -
into healthy Guinea pig. The ami
NAL gradually emaciated, and in three
weeks died. The autopsy showed
cheesy tubarcles at the eehters of the
mesenterie and inguinal glands, and
the liver and spleen were teeming with
military tubercles. The dairy from
which that milk came was promptly
condemned by the Health Board.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

New York Judge remarks: "The
chair for murderers has greatly simpli.
fed the legal taking of human life.
The curiosity attending the business
has died out, and within a few weeks
several criminals have been killed
with the slightest attention from the
newspapers, a paragraph or two by
telegraph being all the notice they got.
The killing is done expeditiously and
thoroughly, and the rope for such
purposes has come to be looked upon
as barbsrism. We mention this be.
cause many wise newspapers declared
when the chair was first used that it
must be abolished.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
A Man With a Double Heart.

When the Mercer County New
Jersey Medical Association was in
session few years ago = colored man
named William King came before
hem for examination. lie claimed
to have two hearts, but careful ex.
animation revealed the fact that his
heart was double instead Of being two
separate blood-punpin8 organs, Be
sides having two distinct pulsations,
which could easily be felt, he had
wonderful control over his double
life engine, being able to stop its
beating for sixty seconds without in.
convenience. st. Louis Republic,
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
The Oldest Human HabltaiIon,

The most ancient architectural ruins
known are the temples at Ipsambul,
on the left bank of the Nile, in Nubia.
The largest of these temples has four
teen apartments, the whole of which
has been hewn from solid rock. Some
idea of the immensity of these tenn.
pies may be CLEANED from the fact
that one single apartment of which
measurements were taken was found
to be fifty-seven feet long and fifty
two feet broad, the vaulted dome.like
roof being thirty feet above the floor
and supported by two rows of massive
square pillars, four in row, aud each
OF the same material of which the
roof, side and floor of the temple are
composed. To each of the pillars is
attached colossal figure of man,
the feet being ON the floor and the
head touching the roof. These hui
man figures are necessarily of enor-
nous proportions, and are each paint
ed in gaudy colors. In front of this
wonderful rock-cut temple are seated
four still larger figures of human be.
ings, two of which are sixty-fve feet in
height, and are believed to represent
Ramses the Great, whose remarkable
military exploits are TO be found de-
pieted all over Northern Africa. Re.
productions oftwo of these colossal fig
ures on the gigantic scale of the orig.
inal, also facsimile of the temple
itself, on a small scale, were made ana
exhibited at the celebrated Crystal
Palace, Sydenham, England. st
Louis Republic.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

The installation of the big electric
searchlight at Sandy Hook, N. j.,
marks the beginning of an important
change in the lighting of the Atlantic
coast. When the giant at Fire Island
is completed, and proposed changes
are made in the illumination of the
harbor channels, big ocean liners
will have no excuse for trying to cut
across Long Island in their efforts to
reach New York in hurry.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL.

The skin of the cactus plant is air
tight.
The apple has larger proportion Of
phosphorous than any other fruit.
There are no known means by which
the scars made by smallpox may be re-
moved.
Giants usually have weak constitu-
tions, and are shorter-lived than
dwarfs.
A Hungarian inventor claims to be
able to make from wood pulp q fabric
suitable for durable clothing.
A Frenchman has invented an cleo
trio mosquito bar which electrocutes
insect pests which come in contact
with it.
A microscopic examination OF hair
will determine with almost infallible
certainty to what kind of animal it
belonged.
Scientific men have demonstrated
that speed of 200 miles an hour can
never be attained by anything that
moves Ou Mn6tlbs
Electric pianos, which play them
selves, the keys being depressed as
though by some unseen hand, are now
being manufactured.
Plants are affected by various sub
stances, Just as animals are; electricity
will stimulate them, narcotics will
stupefy and kill them.
No receptacle has ever been made
strong enough to resist the bursting
power of freezing water. Twenty
pound shells have been burst asunder
as though made of pottery.
An astronomer calculates thai if the
diameter of the sun is daily diminished
by two feet, over 5000 years must
elapse ere the astronomical instruments
now in use could detect the diminu-
tion.
Italian grape culturists are now max
ing Illuminating oil from grape seeds,
from which they get product of from
ten to fifteen per cent. 1t is clear,
colorless and inordorous, and burns
without smoke.
The light from the sun reaches the
earth in seven and one-half minutes,
though the distance is such that can
non-ball fired from the sun and con-
tinuing its velocity unabated would
require more than seventeen years to
to reach the earth.
A horse can draw on metal rails one
and two-thirds times as much as on as
phalt pavement, three and one-third
times as much as on good Belgian
blocks, five times as much as on good
cobble- stone, twenty times as much as
on good earth road, and forty times as
J much as on sand.
The migrating instinct is uncontrol-
liable in birds that have it at all. Geese
Matched from the eggs of the wild
variety, though they have had no op-
portunity of learning, take wing in the
fall and fly off to the South; if their
wings be clipped they will walk off as
fast and go as far as they can.
In recent lecture, Sir Robert Ball
said that telegraphic message would
go seven times round the earth in a
second, and if n telegraphic message
could be sent to the moon it would
reach its destination in a little more
than second. He also thought that
it would take something like eight
minutes to arrive at the sun.
More than three hundred species of
fish hitherto unknown to naturalists
are described by NJ. Leon valiant as
inhabiting the lakes of Borneo. Many
other fish are identical with species
living in the waters OF the Sunda
Islands and off Indo-China. AS these
species never reach the sea, they fur
nish another argument in favor of the
theory of former connection Of these
countries.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
An English exhibitor at the Worlds

An English exhibitor at the Worlds
Fair has returned the medal and
diploma awarded on the ground that
they are without value, states the
Courier-Journal. All exhibitors, he
says, received them, and amateurs
whose exhibits were of trihing
character received awards equal in
value and merit to those made to the
largest and most important exhibitors.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
Truth About HimdOos.

Despite all the talk about the Hin.
docs being so kind TO dumb beasts,
there were 74l5 cases of cruelty TO
animals in Calcutta alone last year.
The Society for the Prevention of
Cruelty to Animals employs twenty
three agents, and collected in lines
ls, ,622 rupees. Denver Times.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

G. P. Huntington says wheat in
California is ceasing to be a factor Of
much importance in the wealth of the
State. Although the State has pro-
duced 60,00O,O0 bushels year, he
believes that in few years it will not
produce 10, 900, 900 bushels. Other
crops are taking the place of wheat
with much more profit.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
bidder.

The English are pushing north
from Yambesi and west and south
through and beyond Mashonaland in
the latter direction lie the elevated
pastures or plateaus of this part of
Africa blessed with temperate eli
mate and fertile soil, and destined ere
long to be the seat of great em-
miro
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

Hardest Sneeze on ReeOrd.

Sneezing is all right in its way, but
should not be indulged in too ardent
ly or painful consequences may ensue,
as illustrated in the case of a young
man of Paterson, N. j., who sneezed
his shoulder out of joint. This is the
hardest sneeze on record. Detroit
free Press.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

The island kingdom of Tatota, near
New Zealand, with all the rights,
privileges, prerogatives andappurten.
ances of royalty-including throne
and crown-is for sale to the highest
biddey
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

The New York Times notes the fact
shat "the only part of the country
which seems disposed at present to in
vite OF encourage immigration is tho
Soutb "
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

The Supreme Court has decided that
n telegraph company is not liable for
errors in the transmission of a cipher
dispatch.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
THE STOUT PASSENGER.

\ the city of Brus-
sells a great deal of
very pretty lace is
exposed for sale.
English women ad-
mire this lace and
buy it. II they go
straight from Bel
gium to England
they can take it
home without hsv-
ing to pay any
duty but if they
pass s t h + o u g h
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
LAR RIED.

VINO was to him avepSON AT Frewsbu
OF money in his purse 1894, by j. NJ. FIR
Kansas Clones and Miss l.,
There is much tendernS Nebraska, Pa.
seemingly cruel world but OTTERER-On
rarely finds it-Clevelsnd PHown, N. Y,
er. Frederick
Pathos sometimes is very nellie, and NJ
humor and some peoples humORnn, Fol-
very near topathos. .-SomervilleJ Jour.
nal
To learn to play the trombone it is
necessary to have good lungs and
indulgent neighbors. - Philadelphia
Record
great many persons have been
kept from making their mark in this
world by copy books. Chicago In
ter-Ocean.
Muriel-"And how are you getting
on with that Boston girl?" Jack
"Swimmingly. I've succeeded in
breaking the ice. Harlem Life.
Lover-'I assure you, Herr Meyer,
l cannot live without your daughter
Herr Meyer-"Oh, you overestimate
my income. "-Fliegende Blaetter.
Her brow was like the snowdrlft,
Her throat was like the swan
When she'd bought complexion powders
And strewed them thickly on.
Chicago Tribune.
She-"I believe the affection you
professed for me was all put on" He
Same as your complexion was in
those days, eh?"-Indianapoli Jour-
nal
Little boy, doesn't it pain you to
see an elderly woman hanging on to q
strap" Boy keeping his seat)-
''No'm, less it's my ma a"-Boston
journal.
When a woman puts on a nice apron
around the house to save her dress,
she puts on another apron on top of
that to save the nice apron. -Atchi
son Globe.
Rose Harry has such a cheerful
disposition. He never borrows trou-
BILE" DHisy-"I have been told
he makes AN exception of that. -
Harlem Life.
He-"They are not on speaking
terms, you know" She "Why, they
are dead in love with each other"
He-"For that reason they don't
speak; they, It sit and gaze at each
other, "-Phih delphia Call.
Mabel-"Papa is getting anxious
about your calls. Yesterday he want
ed to know who you were" Adorer
-"Um / say, Mabel, if he mentions
the subject again tell him you heard
me- grumbling about high taxes. -
New York Weekly.
MARY Jane" said the rector sol.
emnly, "the steak is cooked to a crisp
and the pOtatOes are raw You hava
left undone the things that ought to
be done, and cooked too done the
things that ought not to be done. ~
Indianapolis journal
Sunday Morning Wife-"C Come,
John, why don't you get up? Your
breakfast was ready an hour ago, and
it's spoiled by this time" Husband
lis it? Very we'll then l don't
want il. Call me in season for din
neT. Boston Transcript.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
New York City has more Southerners
than any city in the South.

1t is estimated that there are in
London fully three million people
whoJnever enter place of worship.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

A game bird-The shuttlecock.
Truth.
1t may also be said that LONELINESS
is only skin deep.-Puck
The man who play~ football, only
has a.fghting chance for his life.
The man who lost his temper wasn't
proud of the article when he found it.
Some men are in the hands of a law
yer or doctor all the time. .-Atchison o,
Globe. gun
Talent is the ability to make use OF 70 q wi wi
the results of some one else's geniuse free {
Puck. assertion
The greatest organ in the wcN"u W
with no stops-woman' voice.
ell Courier. SAIVE.
Whenever man makes got TSbeG Rbeum' noi Feve T
he begins to talk about his Glands, Chiiblain
ment. sruptions, and pos
hint 70 tb0 vise is or no pay req quired:
-vided the wise are disnded. Price 25 rents D,
Galveston News. bv siggins Il Mason.
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25

When a man IS
should not place
his companion.-
Usually when S
to burn she is twas SICK VIC gave nef oa''O''A.
body. -Galvesto as Child she cr'eo ior oaS'oria'
1t is a mighty came D,'0' '.o elD-e - oas'o,-1,
to have his schoo Oh'uren Sno gave 'neir 0~S''r'A'
parents-Boston
One of the great
The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1894-07-25
CAROLINA'S SEA ISLANDS,
A PECULIAR SECTION OF THE
SOUTH ATLANTIC COAST.

Numerous Little Islands on Which
Many People Work in Various Ir-
dustries-Last Years Storm.
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1894-08-03
JAWN CAME BACK.
MISS Beseni7egs's Troubles Which u Shift
less Bog Shared.

"Died off somers In Colorady: a heap
better a stayed East AMI died comforta-
BILE. / seen the boy yesterday along to
the shop with the man and the bosses. :"
And Miss Bennings don't teck to
him."
mo, she's a slow person to make up
her mind, and she don't change in a
hurry. She was mad when she got the
letter. She says she set on the kitchen
step and cried, she were so mortal mad
No word In the whole letter about
astin', Jest that the boy had been
shipped. She declared she wasn't gunno
let folks put on her that away; she had
settled in her mind when lawn LETT
never to have another boy, but so fur
she Amt said nothink TO the boy only
she amt tuck to him."
JAVA. he were her brothers boy
Her half-brother, old man Bits ooy'
They was arays shiftless over to Bits
Some say as Miss Bennings was TOO
great a change to Jawn: he couldn l
stand not bein' shlftless."
The woman at the little window and
the man outside the shop both laughed.
IT feered." said the man. slowly as
some'n come out o. the garden up 10
Miss Bennings's. kerryin' pea-huii'
and didn't know where 70 throw II"
They both laughed aTain-
The evening world. [volume] (New York, N.Y.) 1887-1931, 1894-08-03

seemed as IL all the women living in
- region OF Cross Roads had trouble
aa' spring. Miss Crecy Lyons had a
e'oacS with her rheumatism, Liza Jones
' 's heI foot severely through clean
ardness." as she herself shrilly de-
"Afed Mis- Tilly Ann Smith lost three
~u'ns Ct kettle OF soap. IT run and
1uealed when l seen 1t bilin' over" Miss
s%th explained to every sympathetic
lshoor, but 'peared like / didn't hev
S. sense fer to pull The log away and
sehch the blazin'." Miss Bennings's
NOuole was a boy.
me fust one she took on herself to
80 but this her'n was thrust upon
y. said Liza Jones. giving out the
~ t piece Of news from the window Of
h,. oiacksmith's cottage. Yes the
,,,s lawns son; you'd know that ef
ns,s ever seen Jawn. Miss Bennings
ana made up her mind to do fer Jawn.
nn, S running of the way he did Jest
ne her completely"
A,, listener opened and closed his
tLr, eyes and opened them again par
t,1 removed the quid OF tobacco dex-
nnsy from one cheek to the other.
u. a his clumsy hands deeper into
,vekets OF his trousers and inquired:
a.. ,s n he's lawns sonf What BE-
o Johnf"