The Irish standard., 1894-09-08

0oAiy, SiiCu lnSS TtpOTtSr, cneerliY,
theresa warrant out for my arrest.
shall have to go tomorrow at the
latest"
What! to jail?" cried his horrified
friend, his conscience now troubling
him, as the parting came. for ms LACK
Of kindness to an old comrade.
''Not If the court knows herself. But
to Buffalo, which is pretty much the
same thing. Still, thank goodness, /
don't need to stay there long. I'll be
in New York before I'm many DAYS
older. yearn to plunge into the arena
once more. The still calm peaceful
ness Of this whole vacation has made
me long for excitement again, and I'm
glad the warrant has pushed me into
the turmoil"
We'll, Richard, I'm sorry you have
to go under such conditions I'm afraid
l have not been as companionable
comrade as you should have had"
"Oh, you're all right, Kenny. The
trouble with you is that you have
drawn little circle around Toronto
university and said to yourself: This is
the world 1t isn't, you know. There
is something outside of all that"
Every man, doubtless, has his little
circle. Yours is around the Argus
office"
Eyes, but there are special wires
from that little circle to all the rest of
the world, and soon there will be an
Atlantic CABLE
Il do not'hold that my circle is as
large as yours; still, there is something
outside of New York even.''
"You bet your life there is; and now
that you are in more sympathetic
frame of mind, it is that want to talk
with you about. Those two girls are
outside my little circle, and / want to
bring one of them within it. Now, Rem
mark, which of those girls would you
choose if you were me?"
The professor drew in his breath
shortly, and was silent for moment.
At last he said, speaking very slowly:
| Il am afraid, Mr.. Yates, that you do
not quite appreciate my point of view.
As you may think have acted in an
unfriendly manner, I will try for the
first and final time to explain it. I
hold that any man who marries good
woman gets more than he deserves, no
matter how worthy he may be. / have
profound respect for all women, and
think that your light chatter about
choosing between two Is an insult to
! both of them. think either of them
is infinitely too good for you-or for me
either
''Oh, you do, do you? Perhaps you
think that you would make much
better husband than I. If that is the
case, allow me to say you are entirely
wrong. If your wife was sensitive,
you would kill her with your gloomy
fits. I wouldn't go off in the woods
and sulk, anyhow"
'sIf you are referring to me, will
further inform you that I had either
to go off in the woods or knock you
down. chose the lesser Of two evils. :"
"Think you could do 1t, suppose?
Kenny, you're conceited. You're not
the first man who has made such q
mistake and found he was barking up
the wrong tree when it was too late for
anything but bandages and arnica."
Il have tried to show you how feel
regarding this matter. I might have
known I should not succeed. We will
end the discussion, If you please"
=. ''Oh, no. The discussion is just be-
ginning. Now, Kenny, I'll tell you
what you need. You need good
sensible wife worse than any man
know. 1t is not yet too late to save
you, but it soon will be. You will be-
fore long grow crust on you like a
snail, or a lobster, or any other cold
blooded animal that gets shell on it
self. Then nothing can be done for
you. Now let me save you, Kenny, be-
fore it is too late. Here is my PROPOSE
tion:- You choose one of those girls
and marry her. I'll take the other
I'm not as unselfsh as may seem in
this, for your choice will save me the
!, worry Of making up my own mind. Ac-
cording to your talk, either of the girls
is too good for you, and for once ! en-
tirely agree with you. But let that
pass. Now, who is it to be?'
Good God, man, do think am go
ing to bargain with you about my
future wife?"
"That's right, Kenny. I like to hear
you swear. Il shows you are not yet
the prig you would have folks believe.
There's still hope for you, professor
Now, I'll go further with you. AL
though / cannot make up my mind
just what to do myself. I can tell
instantly which is the girl for you,
and thus we solve both problems at
one stroke. You need wife who will
take you in hand. You need one who
will not put up with your tantrums,
who will be cheerful and who will
make man Of you. Kitty Bartlett is
the girl. She will tyrannize over you
just as her mother does over the old
man. She will keep house to the
queens taste and delight in getting
you good things to eat. Why, every
thing Is as plain as pike-staff. That
shows the benefit Of talking over a
thing. You marry Kitty, and I'll mar;
ry Margaret. Come, let's shake hands
over it." Yates held up his right hand
ready to slap it down on the open palm
Of the professor, but there was no re-