Middletown transcript., 1894-03-10

MS residence as yet was not homelike
ne mad none Exfhose dear Made
aunts or sisters tcwhom forlor
oachelor invariably appeals to help hir
out OF his difficulties. so the manage
ment OF his capacious dwelling wa
entrusted entirely to paid helpers.
Mrs. Green, the housekeeper, declare,
that Molly. the narlor maid, was trif
ing, that she was given to flirting witt
a tall policeman; that Betsy, the kit
clen maid, destroyed more crocker,
llan her wages would pay for; tha
Jim, the butler, drank rather too fire Il,
OF his masters wine. Do what Il,
would ne was sure to hear, on pay da,
al least, a prolonged talk of his depen
dents' delinquencies; and he considered
himself fortunate if Mrs. Green as sh,
poured out his coffee in the morning
dld not flavor it with some most un
palatable household gossip.
MISERY loves company" so he il
turn related the tale of his woes tc
Harry Sinclair, only to receive the in.
variable reply, "You need a wife,"
II know it," he said, when it had
been repeate for the twentieth time.
"Here | am with plenty to sustain a
wife III comfort, and all over the land
there are hundreds of noble women,
who might be happy here, wearily toll
ing for their bread"
What" cried Harry, laughing
hundreds, ehp You would have to
turn Mormon with vengeance"
Nonsense! you know " hat I mean.
Sinclair, hundreds to select one from if
L only knew the one. But 1 don't, so
what's the use of talkingp"
There's Miss King.'
miss King is too old and homely. :"
"Old, why she's not as old as you
are; and as for her looks, why neither
of us | fancy are as good looking as we
used to be. However, there's Miss
Gray"
"She's too much for woman's rights
and that sort of thing. You see want
one who will look after mans
rights"
swell, what do you say to Miss
Joyce?"
''She'sa a f1irt; besides, young woman
who is so thoughtless of her mother
will never make good wife,"
''I'm afraid you're hard to please"
said Sinclair, and there the conversa-
tion ended.
Mr.. Dawson had large, warm
heart, and it did seem pity that 50
much love should be lying dormant,
instead of being bestowed on some fair
damsel who would pay it back with
interest.
Il have it," cried Sinclair one day,
when the subject came up again. He
was merry fellow, intensely fond of
practical joke. Advertise for wife,"
Dawson's face, which had grown
expectabt, instantly fell, He did not
quite approve of such methods, being
a little fashioned in his training.
"It's the great thing nowadays"
went on Sinclair, with apparent earnest
ness. zones choice is SO narrowed
down by society's trammels, and it
may be your suitable mate is not among
your circle Of friends. How then can
you find her? for in these times people
are too business like to go off on what
might prove to be wild goose chase.
Excuse the irreverence of the term.
Another thing-you are saved all the
awkwardness of breaking the ice, and
then your honor is not so involved as
to prevent you from drawing back if it
is not suitable. 1 tell you what, my
bow, this is the very idea for you. I've
it all out. See," and he drew
from his pocket some scraps of paper.
sI've already gone to work and
written out lot of sample advertise
ments."
"But," replied Dawson wayering,
"What would my friends say?"
"Nothing; they need never know.
Yeu see, it is not necessary that you
should sign your name to the adver-
tisement.
"And do you really think it would
do?"
.Do? of course it will, and You do
not commit yourself in the least. If
Won get no replies to suit you, you are
,,ot hound to accept any OF Them"
..I.et,s hear what you've written"
..Tbis is the frst," and, clearing his
throat, he began:
"a middle aged gentleman. desiring
q wife"- a. 1,,o 80. mid
dle-aged yet. =,
swell, hear the rest and then we'll
,;so,ss that. A middle-aged gentleman,
desiring wife, wishes to hear from
suitable young ladies. He is of good
acter and good standing in society,
!. nd IS possessed of comfortable means.
"A ! ddress p, Office of The Times. How
will that dor"
=" ..1,,s we'll enough as far as it goes,
;,,s one-sided. You have said
~ thing Of what she must be-"
..wsit a minute, and I'll read an
.,or A middle-aged gentleman OF
~. =, class standing desires wife ana
,nusekeeper in one. None out young
~ nretty girls need apply"
-. Harry, you're making fm. fun of me-"
nsuson severely. Don't you
IT, that would attract half the bar
Anon ,, and servant girls in the city.
na,as az r,m not middle-aged, I'm only
'orty." aovn q vonnu man. It
:, pu' - misleading, they will think you