The Van Buren press. [volume] (Van Buren, Ark.) 1859-1914, 1894-02-24
LOVED HIS MusTAcAE.
Crime Committed by . Lackey In Revenge
for the Loss of HIS AdorEment'

for the Loss of HIS Adorkmenes
Ofall the curious motives for crime
recorded by history or enumerated by
Lombroso, without doubt the most &C.
centric and amazing is that alleged by
a lackey in Vienna, who has just acted
the part of the unjust steward, COM
mitted robbery and threatened murder
and suicide, all for the sake OF miser'
able mustache, of which, during the
past five years, nothing had remained
but the maddening memory. HIS mis-
tress-a wealthy widow we'll stricken
in years-when engaging him as a
lackey made it condition sine qua non
that his upper lip should be always
clean-shaven. Albert Zaikovsky at first
demurred, then consented under pro-
test and, after several vain attempts
to have the cruel order rescinded, sub
mitted to his fate with seeming resig-
nation. But the sequel shows that the
wounds inflicted by the shaving OFT OF
his mustache had never healed, ana
now he has taken what he considers
Just revenge, under circumstances
which, in any other country, would
have branded the man as lunatlc,
saws Vienna correspondent. But in
Austria the mustache fulfils SO much
more important function than i'll En-
gland. that no male citizen is complete
without it, while it covers no end
of natural blemishes An individ-
ual may be disfgured and bow
legged and generally unpreposses-
sing, and Zaikovsky was all three
but once he possesses the hirsute
adornment Of the upper lip he's "a
man for o. that" Hence the wearing
of the mustache is tolerated in profess
sions in which elsewhere it would
be deemed an impeachment, and the
singers Of the Imperial opera threat
ened to strike when, on the occasion
of the German emperor's last visit to
Vienna, they were requested to appear
in their roles clean-shaven. In some
provinces the priests and monks are
not only permitted, but are compelled,
to sport mustache while carefully
shaving their boards, as otherwise
their fiocks would lose all faith in the
efficacy of their ministrations.
Zaikovsky's situation was probably
the nearest approach to sinecure
which the luckiest of lackeys can hope
to obtain in this imperfect world. His
mistress. whose health was delicate,
was generally absent for six or nine
months out of the twelve, during
which time he was at liberty to let his
hands rest from work and let his mus
tache grow. A few days ago the'lady,
about to return to her house after a
long absence, telegraphed to her
lackey to have everything in readiness
for her coming and to meet her at the
station, but on her arrival she discov-
cred no traces of her servant. At home
she found everything in apple-pie
order, the table laid, supper prepared
and only the lackey missing. The
maid said he had gone out some hours
before with a couple of valises full OF
things. This seemed suspicious, and
when Madame glanced at her snow.
white napkin, she deserted an envelope
without any address, which, on being
opened, was seen to contain the small
est copper coin of the empire, and the
visiting-card of the missing lackey with
the oracular inscription, II seek death,
but do you look to your safe" In
moment the lady had rushed through
the suite of apartments that had sep
arated the dining-room from the bed
room, and, examining her safe, found
everything in apparent order. But she
sent for the police all the same. Then
the safe was moved away from the
wall by three men (the lady had left
her keys in her portmanteau at the
station) when an enormous hole was
discovered in the further side, and an
examination of the contents showed
that many thousand forms had been
distracted
But the most interesting find was a
letter deposited in the safe by the I'M
faithful servant In this lengthy lucu-
bration he confesses that he stole the
scrip, sold it and invested the proceeds
in the various Austrian lottery loans,
in which he duly lost them and in bet
ting on races. His motive was to re-
venge himself on his mistress for hav-
ing lublSUcu Ou tuc EculOVdl u Ills NUS
tache, a measure which, he writes, cut
deep into his feelings and wounded his
honor beyond endurance. He then goes
on to say that he is still actuated by
sentiments Of kindness towards the
lady, in spite Of her unjustifiable con.
duct in the matter OF the mustache,
and that no more convincing proof of
his friendliness could be given than
the circumstance that although he
had at one time firmly resolved to MUIR
der her, pity for her prevailed over JUS
tice, and he permitted her to live on.
Now, however, he considers it his duty
frankly to tell her that If she commu-
nicates with the police she is lost, as
he will then be compelled to murder
her without remorse, and then save
himself from the ignominy of arrest by
committing suicide.-London Tele-
graph.
The Servant Was Willing.
A lady, whose Christian name was
Jane, and who had little daughter
named for her, was engaging a house.