The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1894-10-20

mired and exalted? They passed 30 years
| together in the most delightful and per
| feet intimacy, TO the great scandal of the
women Of the day who could not appre-
ciate an attachment so deeply rooted.
| There was never cloud between them
and seemingly no cessation of their love.
| The honest man, Du Deffand, let II
| pass with a touching resignation. But
! finally, after all these years of atten-
| tions, protestations, pledges and devO-
! ton, the two found themselves alone in
/ the apartments of Nine. du Deffand,
with the husband long dead and ma
dame i'll unto death. What are you do
| ing?' she called ont TO her friend from
an inner room. And where are you:
| L am sitting in the corner of your chin
new, quite at home, he made answer
There are very few friendships as old
as ours. It is 80 years and not rup-
ture,' she sighed. Yes, that is what l
| have always admired answered he
! But, exclaimed she, has that not been
| from the fact that at the core we were
very Indifferent to each other?' -
And the application?'' ask, trifle
anxiously.
Lies in the fact that the foundation
stone of your Platonic friendships is.
after all, respectful Indifference, an
swered the foreigner, picking up my
fan and waving it idly once or twice.
Then you think"--
THAT there can be no affection be-
tween n man and woman without the
danger of its developing into passion
ate attachment, and if they do remain
the sort of friends your charming Amer
lean imagination would have them they
must indeed care very little about each
other"
/ Immediately began an indignant
protest and continued my vigorous de-
Tense of the subject in hand.
what rank heresy to talk in that
way L know so many men and women
who are devoted TO each Others interests
without any thought of love between
them, and also know that those friend
ships have lasted through trials bitterer
than death. There must have been deep
affection at the bottom to have stood
up under such attacks on its genuine
ness. / have in mind also the case of
distinguished man of letters who for IS
years has been the devoted friend and
counselor of n literary woman, with
whom he has maintained an unbroken
correspondence. They have shared each
others hopes, fears and triumphs. Dur
ing this period many women have
caught the passing fancy of the man,
for, as it has been aptly said, a poet
without a love is like a sky without a
star, and he has wandered out of his
friends orbit, only 10 return, however, I
with the tale of his establishment and
to VOW that friendship was more salts
flying and enduring than love. That
word love has never been spoken be-
tween these friends of mine for good
and urgent reasons. The mans ex-
preston of devotion is in his books or
articles, not always in open dedication,
but in the use of some pet name of his
friends, some passages of her life, some
description of her personality or her in
dividuality, and thus he pays her sub
tie compliment which the world sees
not, but which associates her with his
best work and makes her feel that she
is its inspiration.
I'm all this argument, however, re-
member am speaking Of people edu
Gated to the highest degree of intellec-
tuality, men and women who thorough
" understand themselves and the world
With creatures of lower order of men
tally, those in whom the materiality
predominates over the spirituality, these
ideal friendships are among the impos-
sibilities. In the first place, they could
not understand the plane of thought
from which such intellectual commu-
nication and friendship draw their in
SEPARATION. With them the emotional
part of their nature would dominate ev-
cry other sentiment, and when one
yields to materialism of course friend
ship ceases. Oh, no; the man must be
well poised and full of respect for tho
woman and capable of sacrificing him
self for her well being, man to whom
brains and mental advancement mean
more than anything else, and above all
n man who believes in the equality of
the sexes in everything and recognizes
the fact that women are as fully and
completely equipped mentally as the
members of his own sex. However, in
forming these friendships he must Sc
lect the woman who Is oftentimes hard
est TO gain as a friend, who, although
perhaps needing just the kind of asso-
citation it Is In his power to offer her,
yet gives the world and him the i'm
preston that she possesses sufficient
courage and independence TO fight life's
battle alone
And the woman" questions my
listeners
''Ah, the womani Now we have
reached the vital core of the question,
for indeed everything rests with her.
She can make or mar such an ideal
friendship; she can gain and hold in its
highest term the true, honest, unselfish
affection and devotion of some man, or
through weakness or wantonness she
tan merge it into lawlessness and shame
or even into hatred. To begin with, a
woman must be sure of herself; she
should study her OWL liabilities, know
her own weak points and guard against
them, and with it all possess enough in