The Olneyville tribune. (Providence, R.I.) 1893-189?, 1894-02-24

Where isthe other handsome lady
that used TO be cashier here?" he
asked.
The other?' she echoed.
"Oh, ] beg your pardon. he said.
You are the same lady. 7 wanted
TO get a twenty dollar bill changed
Its going to leave me short, Pm
afraid, she smiles, but I guess !
will let you have it,"
And she did New York Press.
MOTHERS DARLINGs.
Mrs. Naber-Johnny commenced
to do sums in long division yester-
day.
Mrs. Nexdoor (proudly)-Tommy
has been swearing two weeks
Puck.
NO DOUBT OF ITS SINCERITY.
DO you believe Ferrisy's piety is
sincere?'
Il am positive !. is"
What makes YOU think 500"
Some one gave him a counterfeit
quarter the other day, and he hasn't
attempted to pass it on any one but
and that's between friends, YOU
know.-[New York Press.
A SEES BETTER DAYS.
This parrot. ma'am," said the
dealer, ''is one that | can recon-
mend. 1t was in the family of "a
clergyman for many years
well, gents. what'll ye have?
Name your pizen!" exclaimed the
parrot, with startling emphasis.
He was obliged to part with it,
however. " continued the dealer, with
an apologize cough, 'And FOR the
last year or two il has belonged TO
the Alderman from n ward. - Chi
cago Tribune.
WHERE he CAME N.
How do YOU manage to live in this
dead town.
Fine; I'm the undertake.. - At
lanta Constitution.
COMPETITION.
Mrs. Jackson Parke-Wha6 in the
world is keeping you up so late?
Mr.. Jackson Parke-I am writing
an article for the papers or How l
Killed My First Hog" These literary
chaps with their stories Of how they
wrote their first books are not going
to have the field all TO themselves,
not by a Observation-Disclosures Jour
nal.
SURE ENOUGH.
4ElI, ,,.,A1. 4, L. $500.
plished ~linguist, but you should hear
him murder Latin
II shouldn't think he would be
able to murder Latin"
"Why not?"
1T is a language that Is already
1T WAS ABOUT ALL HE EFT.
Excuse me-" said the gourrnand Of
the boarding house, addressing the
landlady, excuse me, madam, leav-
ing the table"
Pray, don't mention it, said the
lady, politely. as she glanced at the
few eatables that remained; we
know that you are obliged TO leave il
or you would not do So"
Then the other boarders looked at
each other and smiled significantly.
New York Press.
ENGLISH AS SHE is SPOKE.
Gus De smith, hear that your
wife's mother is very sick. Is she
dangerous?
Pete Amsterdam-She is 4 very sick
woman, but she is not as dangerous
as when she is well.-[Texas SiftinGs.
4 GREAT SUCCESS.
Strawber-How did you ike that
barber | recommended you 20?
Singerly-First rate, old nan l
never heard those old stories Of yours
told better in my life.-[Detroit Free
Press.
INTERIORS.
She docking around the room
What lovely interior de|corationsl
He docking over the table)-De-
lightful, | am sure !-[Detcoit Free
Press.
CLOSE FIGURING NECESSARY.
Elderly Maidcn-This i 30 uneN-
pected, Mr.. WellaIong, that-that YOU
must give me time!
Elderly Lover - Time, Miss Re-
becca? Do you think there IS any 10
EASY.
And do you yer invite your poor
relations to visit your"
"Oh, yes. indeed. You see they
are all too poor to get here. Truth.
SIMPLE.
Claire-How extremely simple that
gown was Miss de We're wore at the
ball.
Marie-Yes; almost idiotic.
NOT so A ADVANCED.
Uncle George trust, Henry, that
you are out Of debt.