Fort Worth gazette. [volume] (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1891-1898, 1894-07-06
"aRovER cLEvnLANn.e
wrr AND nuMon .

Mrs Whaskster'-Bessie, when Mrs.
Wlnterskyes comes you must not say
anything about her hair being false.
MRS. Minterskyes (some minutes la
terJ--And this ~ Bessie, is IL flow
you have grown.
Bessie--Yes'm think your hair
looks just beautiful. but II was you
I'd paint up them eyebrows.
Are you sure your sister don't like
Mr. FlnneyG"
Little Ton-Yes; why. when he comes
she won't let him have u whole chair
to himself; she Just makes him take
hale Of hers.
Mother-Now Johnnie. l don't want
to ever catch YOU In that jam closet
again.
Johnny sobblng)-An' don't want
you to. nuther.
Farmer Tibbets-Hang that cowl
always have to club her fore l can
make her stand still.
Little Nephew Qrom the clty)-Is
that the one that gives the whipped
cream?
Teacher Din mlneralogy clnss)--John-
ny. give me the name of the largest
known diamond
Johnny-The Ace.
:, Efiie--Mammy. why do they hunt
lions and tigers?
Mamma.-..eeause they kill the poor
little sheep, Ellie,
Ellie (after pause)-Jhen why don't
they hunt the butchers, mammy7
II was Bobbie's mothers birthday
her thrtieth. some said, though there
9th KyIa Afupa.aA To.
II her with three or four years more.
Bobbie. too, had his ideas on the sub
Ject. apparently FOR at breakfast he
said
How old are you mamma?"
oh. nineteen or twenty was the
'Humphr' said Bobbie. "saems TO
ms you're CROWN backwards"
children" said the superintendent
of the South side Sunday school. do
You remember what Is said OF the lilies
how they toll not, neither do they
spin, and yet'--will some boy or girl
finish the quotation?"
And the doa. little girl In n pink
dress rose up and said:
sullivan In all his glory was not ar
rayed like one of these"
Mammal noticed that you paid
very close attention to the minister,
Robbie. Were YOU Interested, deRr7
Robble-Yes. sir-ree. I kept wonder
In how long II would he before he
found out that his necktie was way
above his collar.
WHILE" said the visitor, what is
your ambltionY' I'd like" said the
boy putting down his yellow covered
story of the plains, ito have the pco-
Tals. lrRftahln Va la NJ
mention OF my name"
Little JOHNNY won't be kept after
school for whispering TO Tommy Dodd
any more.
Mother-I am glad OF that.
'Ycs'm. Tommy sat behind me and
mad to turn my head to whisper TO
iim. and the teacher always saw me-"
You don't do II any more, / hopper"
Nome. I've got a seat behind Tom
my. and now he'll have to turn his
lead."
Old gentlemen-Do you mean TO say
hat your teacher never thrashes you?
Little boy-Neycr. We have moral
'uaslon In our school.
what's that"
"Oh. we get kept In and stood UP in
corners and locked out and locked in |
md made to write one word "A thou
and times and scowlsd at ana jawed
It and that's ALL :"
Mother--Whatl Been In swimming? |
And this time OF year2 Mercy When |
went out today 1 wore my winter
,oat.
Little Johnny with teeth chnttering) |
-Yes'm. Il was so--so--cold we ha-had
o 1um-tump Into the wa-water 10
'eep warm.
Teacher--As the iwlg is bent the
rec is inclined! Do you understand
hat2
Boy--Yes'm. Wen bicycle boys grow
Up they'll walk with a Htoop.
Store boy-Can't get on today. We're
akin an inventory OF stock. Awful
Iusy.
chum-wot good are you in takin'
Inventories?
Store boy--Good? I'm more important
han the head booiskeeper. wanh the
yspecs on OF last years goods
Teacher-some scientists now be-
cyc that the lights recently seen on
lars are signals from the people OF
hat planet 10 the Inhabitants OF earth.
What do you think OF thstG
Bright boy (yho lives on the sep
they've lost their rud-
pr