The Hawaiian star. [volume] (Honolulu [Oahu]) 1893-1912, 1894-01-26
IN A JUSTICE COURT.
his HONOR" DELIVERS An OPINION
IN IMPRESSIVE STYLE.

Attempt to Quash an Indictment because
ofa Misspclled word--Ta Justice Whose
Chief Aim L. to Put the "BerBosh" on
Crime Whenever II shows it, q gly Front.
Life has been n lamentnhle failure 10 the
man who has not pruwled around the pre-
cnct judicial gristmill ON grinding days
and seen iniquity "stompcd on and JUS
tice crowned qucrn OF the May
But II You would spe he Justice court in
its wild "unpestered' state go into the
Jungles OF east Texas. where it roams at
will and subsists on funny young men
who get accused of disturbing "A peace
which in all likelihood never existed In
such places the justice Of the peace gener-
ally runs his Office in connection with n
nall stock OF family groceries and the
sessions of the court are held in the rear
end of the mercantile establishment. where
the presiding genius can keep his eye on
the front door. so that he may not miss "A
cash sale II opportunity offers. And the
opportunity sometimes presents itself on
such occasions, and "his honor" asks the
lawyers and the jury TO excuse him while
he increases the gross receipts of the cash
drawer. II also happens sometimes that
the j. j. espies some one In the courtroom
who is in arrears for supplies, and lays a
paperweight ON legal proceedings while
he attempts to induce the delinquent to
square the account This sometimes re-
suits in bad blood between debtor and
creditor, angry words, aNhandles and bar
rel staves and the ground torn up, in which
"his honor sometimes comes out Of the
conflict ON all fours, with head on him
l.
ment is in order. and the rest Of the docket
is carried over TO the next term Of court
| attended the sitting of one Of these
courts once and saw it hatch out small
brood of unvarnished justice A Young
man had disturbed the peace and triiied
with the dignity Of the state in the one
and the same transaction, and justice
whetted its hayknife aud howlod for re
venge. "The COURT had drawn up the
indictment at the instance of nervous
gentleman, who claimed that II subdivi-
sion of the peace located in his immediate
vicinity had been disturbed by the young
man hereinbefore referred to. In draw
ing up the indictment "his honor lad
DETECTED somewhat from Hoylc aud or
typography aud spelled peace piece.
When court was opened, counsel for defen-
dsnt attempted 10 oquash the complaint on
the ground of its literary and legal imper-
fection aud made quite an exhaustive ar
gument to that end. After counsel had
closed his argument the court" sustained
the Indictment in substantially the fol-
lowing language:
"While admitting that in the drafting
of the indictment an embarrassing degree
of unfamliarity with the standard au-
tborities on diction is evident from the
spelling of the word peace, at the same
time 1t is the opinion of the court that
this inaccuracy does not vitiatc the indict-
ment, for we cannot enter upon the dan
gerous precedent of prediCating the ad
ministration of justice upon certain de
gree of familiarity with the textbooks.
Justice was full grown and had corns
on her toes before knowledge had ceased
to wrestle with the collie. She stood guar
dian over the liberties of man while kuowl-
edge was in the kindergarten and small
clothes and now TO make her subservient
to this precocicus young 'un were like the
head paying homage to the tail. lfcoun-
sci will bear with the court, we will state
that we are here to administer job lot Of
rectangular justice and not for the pur-
pose of discussing the literary merit Of
the complaint wherein supcrHuity of
~ seems to have obtained and in which
the drought appears to have struck the "a
crop.
Admitting that, when scrutinized by
the scholarly eye, peace conveys to the
mind IA different meaning to that of piece,
1t has no age over il when conveyed 10
the understanding Theoretically. Hence,
should witness ON the stand testify to
the fact that the defendant had disturbed
the peace the import of the word would
be determined 10y tho sense in which 1t
was employed and the same process of
reasoning would obtain as applied TO the
written instrument.
"Therefore the court holds that the
complaint, while little wobbly in its legs
as regards literary makeup. is abundantly
sufficient for all practical purposes, and
this Is not court in which abstract
theory will ever be invited to seat up
next to the stove and practical demOnstra-
tion allowed to gnaw n file in the back
hall. We take 1t for granted that justice
would get along as well and sleep ns
soundly should n conviction be secured for
disturbing the piece as though the same
verdict had been obtained for disturbing
the peace. The fine would be nJ lrrl' 2
to pay for the person so convicted, the rup-
tured peace would recover its normal func-
ton as early, and the revenue accruing to
the county by reason Of tho fine cc.,tctcd
would build as many bridges, court
houses or jails. The chief end and aim ot
the justice court il to put the kerbosh on
crime wherever il shows its ugly front,
and not to attempt to comp2te in ortho
graphical finish with the bill Cf fare at a
first rate restaurant in drawing mp bills
of indictment. Scholarly attainment is
all well and good, but the crucial moment
sometimes arrives when justice presses
her lily white hands to her stomach and
yearns to be satisfied.
"We do not desire to be understood ~
favoring the conviction Of n party for one
offense when charged with another. For
bid that we should desire n man hung
when he should only have the seat of his
pants kicked into tatters and his plug Of
tobacco taken away from him. Neither
do we favor the release of a party when IL
is evident that he il guilty simply because
the indictment whereby he is brought he
fore the courts would fail Ia provoke APP
plause from literary society. so. with a
( supreme desire to do the square thing he
tween legal form on the one hand and
box toed justice on the other, the court
will be forced To sustain the sutliciency OF
the indictment and leave the rest To the
/ jury and its God "
Then the trial was entered into, and aft
er the evidence was taken ard pyro-
technic display OF oratory tog IA of 10y
| the counsel ON either side Of . ease, tn,
/ jury found the defendant gui and fined
him IS and trimmings for disturbing th'
/ "piece. .h-Galveston News.
/ All Explained.
/ A New York clergyman who was preach