Warren sheaf. [volume] (Warren, Marshall County, Minn.) 1880-current, 1894-05-31
"a. FUNNY EXPERIENCES
The Man With : Jsrky Voice Tells : Re-.
mArkablo story.

The MAN With . Jerky Voice Tells . re.
markable story.
Had q funny experience once" said
the man with q jerky voice; mot so
blamed funny, either, when you come
to think Of 1t. Was out west in them
days, looking for the fortune that
never got there; had lots Of luck,
though; bad luck; walkin' one time
from nowhere trying TO get somewhere
before It rained; met a man on boss;
good boss, too; I'm q Judge; asked me
if I wouldn't take him to his owner
four miles down the road; glad enough
to do 1t, Twas; had walked thirty-seven
mile and q half between meals and was
feelin' wobbly on my pins; alw-ys
liked to ridea boss anyway; got up
when he got down and hadn't more
than straddled him than begun to feel
like gent. Two mile down the road
I met up with a party.
HI says they, there's our
boss.
The man got him FROM says ],
told me to deliver him four miles down
the road; amt used to ridin' here late
~; thought I'd come only about half
way?,
Wow, says they with yell, and
begun to drag me CT Thought l stole
him; said so too in mighty Disagree
able tone Of voice.
1--WE hang boss thieves in these
parts, says they, gettin' out rope;
thought they was goin' to halter the
boss and go after the man that lent
him to me.
..'You'u have to hurry or. he'll get
away, says I, thinkin' of the other
Teller.
"'Will hep says they, with . yell,
and with that they slung the rope over
my head.
Hold on says /. I amt
"'You betwe will, says they, and be-
gun to haul her taut That scared me
in seven places and begun to beg. 1
told 'em how it happened and they
held a ante-mortem inquest on me,
as they called it, and brought in YER
dict to give me the benefit of the doubt;
didn't know what that was, exactly,
but didn't have to wait long to find
out. They said they'd leave it to me,
SO they took me off on side road;
didn't like the looks of things, but had
to go: they tied my hands behind me,
put the rope round my neck, stood me
upon a stump, throwed the loose end of
the rope over limb, made it just tight
enough to be uncomfortable, told me if
didn't like it that way could step off
the stump, and rode away"
The jerky voice seemed to have a
choke in it.
Reckon was in the worst fix I'd
been in since l come west, it went on;
''cussed hossback ridin' and wished to
thunder I'd walked; wondered what
kind of man it was anyway that
would put me up stump like that, and
begun to get tired in the legs; feet sore
from walkin', and standin' wasn't
agreeable; tried to git my hands loose
and like to fell off the stump; didn't
try any more; wasn't in no hurry for
the funeral to take place; looked down
off the stump and thought it was mile
to the ground; guess it wasn't so far as
that; tried to gnaw the rope off, but
couldn't reach. not being giraffe; git
tin tireder all the time; begun to think
of mother, home and friends and say
my prayers; tireder and tireder-and
don't know what happened next; come
to after while and saw the man that
had lent me the blamed boss rubin
my hands and gittin up circulation.
Just got here in time, says he,
keepin' on rubin and givin' me a
drink of liquor between rubs When
come plumb to, he told me how he
had been sneakin' round through the
woods and come across me just as /
sorter collapsed and slid off the stump,
and havin' no hard feelings he had
come to my help right off.
ssIt would have been dirt mean ii
you hadn't. said I, seeing you got me
into it and he laughed and begged
my pardon. he was mighty polite
man; laid low till after dark and |
headed for home: he staid; he said he'd
get even with that crowd for treating
q friend of his that way, if he had to
steal all the HOSES in the country. and
I hoped to thunder he would
After which narration the jerky
voice rested. Detroit Free Press.