Fort Worth gazette. [volume] (Fort Worth, Tex.) 1891-1898, 1894-11-18

Yes. sir. If tho print Is large and the
words not too big"
nAh, yes. Read that please. beg pah-
don Good day, SRI"
And he raised his hat and walked snil-
| ingly away. leaving me staring at a Sign
| board which bore the line. keep 10 tho
Left"
That is one English custom which through
some oversight has rot yet been adopted
on this side OF tho water.
Tho BARRIERS at my hotel in London wcro
simply execrable. Their razors were al
ways dull, their hands heavy, and they
seemed to CLEAN pleasure from INJECTING
torture on the unfortunate Americans who
took seats In their inquisiturlal chairs. After
twice submitting to having my beard up
rooted Instead Of mown III, determined that
ere | would again endure the torture l
would wear back home crop Of stylish,
English grown whisliers I complained at
tho otiico OF the bungllng work OF the ton
serial butchers. and asked to be directed
to a less ostentatlous shop where could
place myself In the hands Of tho barber with
some hope OF escaping with whole hide.
The clerk assured me that the BARRIERS con-
nected with the house we're artists In their
line. none better In England. but II | could
no. appreciate true artistic work | might
find something more In keeping With my
tastes on the Strand. Thither | went when
next my board began 10 assert Its independ-
encc. and soon found myself enjoying the
after-dinner breath OF rosy-faced knight
OF the razor. with a smile as broad as the
Populist platform. | knew Just what he
had partaken OF at the MONDAY meal. al
though the subject was not mentioned be-
tween US. lie lathered my chin quite dex-
terously. wasting but very little soap In my
mouth and nostrlls. and gave me a really
comfortable shave. After he had washed
tho newly shorn cheeks and dried them with
va dol fba of prnhn-
cessor In the chair he inserted his two bay
rummy thumbs between my lips and drew
them apart as horses mouth Is opened
when 1t is deslred to learn the animals age.
Fine teeth you ave. sir. Very fine, In
deed"
He withdrew his thumbs to enable me to
reply, leaving behind them taste to which
was not accustomed. assured him that
vas somewhat proud OF my Willie worries. and
he again drew my lips apart and said:
'veiy fine. indeed. but ave you noticed.
sir, that the gums do not grow upon them
as 'lgh as they shouldg That is caused by
a small collection OF tartar Which as es-
capped your brush, hand II should be re-
moved. Hi can do 1t neatly for you In Just
i moment II you wish"
gave him permission to proceed. and
after not more than ten minutes rubbing
and polishing he said:
There you arc, sir. There aren't
'andsOmer set O. teeth In Lunnun.
How much do | owe your" asked as
stepped from the chair and ran my hand in
my pocket.
'''Honly guinea"
What"
"a guinea. sir, The shave would be
thruppence, but I make no charge for that.
Honly charge you for the teeth, sir"
saw at glance a case OF attempted
extortlon from a stranger, and backed up
against the door, not knowing what might
come next. Similar games had been at
tempted on me in American cities where
my Western appearance caused the would-be
robbers to believe l would be an easy VIC