Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-08-16
A TUPID SAGE.
Anthony Hope, in English Illustrated
Magazine.

CudIu anu the Sudue WAS coon INSIDE.
a light breeze stirred the boughs OF
the old apple tree, under which the
| philosopher sat. None of these things
did the philosopher notice, unless it
might be when the wind blew about
the leaves of the large volume on his
knees, and he had to find his place
! again.
The girl sat down just opposite to
| him.
It's very important thing l want
to ask you," she began, tugging at a
tuft Of grass, land it's very-ditticult,
and you mustn't tell any one l asked
you; at, least, I'd rather you didn't"
Il shall not speak of it; indeed,
shall probably not remember it," said
the philosopher.
"And you mustn't look at me, please,
while I'm asking you"
Il don't think I was looking at you,
but if | was | beg your pardon" said
the philosopher, alphabetically.
She pulled the tuft of grass right
out of the ground and flung it from
her with all her force.
suppose a man -" she began.
No, that's not right
You can take any hypothesis you
please" observed the philosopher, 'but
you must verify it afterward, Of
course"
"Oh, do let me so on. Suppose a
girl, Mr.. Jerningham-I wish you
wouldn't nod"
1T was only to show that [ fol
lowed you"
"Oh, of course, you follow me- as
you call it. Suppose a girl had two
lovers-you're nodding again!-or, l
ought to say, suppose there were two
men who might be in love with a
glrl."
only two" asked the philosopher.
You See, any number of men might
be in love with
"Oh, we can leave the rest out" said
Miss May, with a sudden dimple,
they don't matter"
Very WE'LL said the philosopher.
IF they are irrelevant, we will put
them aside"
Suppose then that one of these
men was, oh, awfully in love with the
girl, and-and proposed, you know"
"a momentr' said the philosopher,
opening a notebook. LET me take
down his proposition. What was it?'
why, proposed to her-asked her
to marry him." said the girl, with
stare.
Dear me! How stupid of mel l for
got that special use of the word. Yes?'
The girl likes him pretty we'll, and
her people approve of him and all
that, you know"
THAT simplifes the problem" said
the philosopher, nodding again.
But she's not in-in love with him,
you know. She doesn't really care for
him-much Do you understand?
Perfectly. 1t is a most natural
state Of mind"
"Well, then, suppose that there's an
other man-what are you writing"
Il only put down B}-like that"
pleaded the philosopher, meekly exhib-
! iting his note book.
! She looked at him in a sort of help
less evaporation, with just a smile
somewhere in the background of it.
"Oh, you really are she ex-
claimed.
But let me go on. The man is a
friend of the girls; he's very clever
oh fearfully clever; and he's rather
handsome You needn't put that
| down."
1T is certainly not very material,
admitted the philosopher, and he
crossed out Handsome" Clever he
! left.
And the girl is most awfully-she
admires him tremendously; she thinks
him Just the greatest man that ever
| lived, you know. And she-sne-
The girl paused.
I'm following" said the philoso
pher, with pencil poised.
Shed think it better than the
whole world tiff she could be any
thing to him. you know"
"You mean become his wife?'
well of course, 1 do-at least,
suppose 1 do"
You spoke rather vaguely, yor
know"
The girl east one glance at the phi
rDsopher as she replied:
well, yes. 1 did mean become hi:
wife"
Yes. Well?"
But" continued the girl starting
on another tuft of grass, 'he doesn'
think much about those things. Fl.
likes her. I think he likes her"
well, doesn't dislike her" sug
gested the philosopher. "Shall VI
call him Indifferent?
Il don't know. Yes, rather indiffer
, ent. 1 don't think he thinks about 1t
YOU know. But she-she'S pretty
You needn't put that down"
IT was not about to do So OBJ
served the philosopher.
ssShe thinks life with him would b
: lust heaven; and-and she thinks sh
would make him awfully happy. Sh
: would-would be so proud of him
l you see"
II see. Yes?"