The herald., 1894-03-04

II am not actually rich, but IL yor
give me Mile. Valentine believe me
that my work, my humble acquire
ments'-
'Stop tallfingi Your conversation il
Of no interest TO me. Will you please
to take your departure at once2 II
makes me die of laughing to have you
come to ask me for my daughter.
have only to add, Good evening" -
but, sir, If do not present my suit
until after my automatic brake has
made me q millionaire, Y risk finding
Mile. Valentine married to another.
Now, sir, 1 do not wish to,run any such
risk"
ESQ much the worse. What do you
want me to do about it?"
Passeraud Yetired in much distress.
Banging the doors after him, M. Laman-
tin exclaimed:
"Not a cent? No positipnl Asks
for my daughter. All, really. it is quite
interesting"
This visit, which had SUCH an unfa-
vorable result as regards our friend, left
very slight traces on the mind Of M.
Lamantin. What brought, several
days later, an anxious look to the lat
ter's face was simply the fact that his
parlor chimney smoked.
In the middle Of the month of De-
cember and just as he was preparing
to arrange a reception in honor of his
daughter nineteenth birthday4his par
lor chimney began to smoke. A house,
holder could scarcely have had a more
disagreeable thing happen to him. M.
Lamantin sent for his architect, who
hastened to come. smelling ansorder.
rs that all9'' he said. vexed when he
learned what the matter was.
~ think that is quite enough. 1t is
not amusing to own chimney that
makes my wife and myself weep all
day long, like family recently afiiict-
ed"
"YoIr chimney was built on my
plans. That means it does notssmoke. +"
"But it does.smoke.
Because you burn Mons coal. Don't
burn Mons. Burn wood, and you will
have clear fire."
Perhaps you are right"
The change to wood in place of coal
did not make the chimney's breathing
easier. M. Lamanfin, who was a reso-
lutte man, sent for the best architect in
Paris and begged him to deign to come
in person to study the question.
The artist, after having infinitely ex-
amined the chimney, did not scruple to
restrain this cruel reflection on his
brother in art, "What ass built this
chimney?"
1t was Ledente, my architect.
" 1t was well said; an ass. Have the
flue made four inches higher, in order
to increase the draft. 1t will be all
right them
"What a simple matter it is, after
alll''
''It only needed little Thought.
The operation completed, the Chin
ney smoked as before. But the great
architect took care Of his bill.
"Hang it, what billl" M. Laman-
tin could not help signing as he paid it.
Disguised with architects, the house
holder turned to brickiayers. The first
one called in ordered the addition to
the hue of a piece of sheet iron in the
form Of q serpent.
The chimney continued to send out
its smoke into the parlor.
A second bricklsyer arrived; with
disgust he had his colleagues serpent
! removed and substituted for it sort of
helmet of the same material.
The chimney did not pay any atten-
tion to the helmet, but smoked worse
than ever.
But here the concierge interposed
with these consoling words: "Sir, you
are wrong to despair. ] was just this
moment talking Of this matter with
one of the tenants-oh, must say 1t,
such nice tenant! He told me. that
he would undertake to disenchant your
chimney in five minutes.
LET him come to me instantly, or l
give him notice to leave"
AS quick as lightning Passeraud put
himself at the orders OF M. Lamantin.
He found his landlord tramping up and
down his parlor, which was as cold as
ice.
Ah, it is you, young man, who nat
ter yourself you can cure in five min
utes chimneys incurably i'll. Try; /
am curious to see you do it,
'Five minutes Is little too short a
time, sir. want an hour"
Every well-an hour. Here Is
chimney given up by all the doctors.
If you make it agree to send its smoke
up into the skies instead of down into
my apartments, will give you what
you wish. am quite out Of patience.
/ do not wish to bargain. Name your
price"
"Sir," answered Passeraud, with dig
nifty, "you will give me-the hand of
Mile. Valentine. That is my price
to be paid only after have succeeded. "
"For a chimneyl You wander in
your talk, my dear sir.
"This chimney, sirr Send for M.
GARNER, the architect of the opera; add
to him picked jury of engineers,
chemists, members of the institute, pro-
fessors from the Ecole des Hautes
Etudes, and if these gentlemen can do
in three months what undertake to do
in an hour-that is to say, prevent it
from. smoking-as also to prevent from
smoking all chimneys with the same
trouble, I agree that you should treat
-. ~x-a.o {r1aad roxyfrn