The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1894-02-08
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

"A civil tongue is better weapon
than bowie knife.-Rams Horn.
The man who would have done so
and so if he had been there, never gets
there.-Ram's Horn.
That Mexican kidnapped a Texas
cook to marry her is indication that
the Greasers are to form union
Cleveland Plaindealer
Not only can a woman laugh in
her sleeve, but so can her whole fam
lily, and there's room for the neigh
bors.-Topeka (Kan.) Journal.
-"Dapper is what l call regular
dummy" Great Caesar! He talks all
the timer II know, but look at the
new suits he displays. Inter Ocean.
Mrs. Houser (envious)-'T won
der why it was called Paradise?' Hou-
ser (emphatic) ic)-"Because there was
only one woman in it, of course.''--
Buffalo Courier.
-Jack-'If l happen to meet Miss
Terry I'll speak a good word for you.'
Tom-"Do; speak of me as beautiful
and brainy, but unutterably bad. IN.
Y. Herald.
they are little they are a torment, and
when they grow old enough to be of
use to their sisters other girls borrow
them. m.-Atchison Globe.
Monkeys have a peculiar dread of
snakes. 1t is certainly natural that
they should. The first woman on earth
was led to make monkey of herself
by snake.-N. 0. Picayune.
THE flea is hated by mankind
worse than any other insect-and do
you know why?" Haven't the slight
est idea" Because it makes them
scratch for living Atlanta Consti-
tuition.
-Manager-"De Circassian girls in
peek o. trouble!'' Living Skeleton
''How's that?' "She married de two
headed boy yesterday, an dey arrested
her fer bigamy dis mornin'. boston
Traveller.
--"Of all persons the cross-eycd man
should be the least blamed for con-
frmed skepticism. - ''Should eh? And
why?" Because he knows he can't
believe more'n half he sees, let alone
what he hears. buffalo Courier
-Cashley-''What could you do, my
poor mani" Beggar-'' Might stand
around in the parlor when ye 'ad COM
pany--'' you? What for?'' "NTake
'enl think as We wuz entertainin'
furrin nobleman. "-Cleveland Plain
| Dealer
Officer McGobb-"An' is the har-r-d
tonnes affectin' your busines ahny|'
Hungry Higgins-"Is it affectin' me
business? Is it? wy dey's gettin' to
be so many amatoors in it dat de legit
| don't stand no show at all'-Indian-
apolis Journal.
-Mudge-"Fellow called me liar
last night" Yabsley-"Whatd did you
do?" Mudge-"Well, he weighed about
200 pounds, SO just told him that l
recognized his right as an American
citizen to a free expression of opinion,
and let it go at that. ."-Indianapolis
Journal.
Dusty Rhodes-'I had a private box
at food exhibit this afternoon" Fitz
| William-'How did you come to get
| it?'' Dusty Rhodes-''I was looking in
a restaurant window to see man make
wheat cakes and policeman stepped
up and gave it to me. Kate Fields
Washington.
-"She is going to marry him after
all, then?" Eyes, he has come into
lot of money" "Where did it come
from?'' Nobody knows" Is she con-
tent to marry him knowing nothing
about where he got his money!" "She
knows all she wants to know; she
knows he has got TN. Y. Press
-"Does yer believe in ha'nts?" asked
Uncle Eben's niece. "Um-er-it 'pends
on whut yer mean by ha'nts," replied
the old man. II means de quar- things
dat hangs roun' ole worn out homes. "
Eyes, honey, b'lieves in 'em. ] oncet
picked up yer ole worn-out home in de
shape oh a hornets nes'. An de way
dat place was a'nted was bout de mos
'mazinest ting / ebber did see."-
Washington Star.