The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-06-04
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
The Thing on the Wheel Had Sand
and So 1t Got Away.

Tuesday morning last the mayor of this
town, who is ourself, received a telegram
from Prescott to the effect that a young
man from the east, who is making a tour
of the west on a bicycle, carrying an
American flag with the staff thrust down
the back of his neck. and several bottles
of soothing syrup and other drinks in
his pockets, would pass through this town
al high noon and wanted protection. We
al once started out to hunt up Bill Nc
Gee, Tom Sloane, Jim Watkins and other
eminent citizens who had never seen a
human critter sitting on top of a high
Wneel and are agin the rush of CIVILIZATION:
we got the crowd together and labored
With en-. but the best we could do was to
get promise not to fire over three shots
apiece We telesraphed to have the
young mar take another road, but he
had already started. At II o'clock the side
walks along Apache avenue were lined
with quiet and eXpectant populace, and
everything above two feet high had a gun.
We had done the best we could, and the
thing on the wheel must depend on provi-
dence At 10 minutes to Y it appeared
mile away on the hill. 1t didn't wear
buffalo overcoat and coonskin cap and
was therefore agin US and must die.
When it struck the eastern fringe of the
crowd, the boys began to shoot The en-
lhusiasm was infectious and spread rapid
~. The thing on the wheel had sand and
was level headed. 1t realized the situation
and put, ut, on the leg power, and while
The smoke was hanging low it turned
the hill. crossed the creek and was safe
At the lowest estimate over 300 shots We're
Tired. but all appeared to go wild. While
on this subject we wish to offer word
of advice to certain people The cayuse
ana the mule reached this locality with
the first settlers They are familiar OBJ
jects. They live and breathe and never
seek to overturn the manners and Gus
toms of our forefathers. If you ride a
blke, don't come this way for. a quarter
OF q century yet Give us show to get
used to the sight of the critter. and
give us time to figure on what may fol-
low It's introductton. We can hear the
rumble of civilization afar off. but the
man who has picked his teeth with the
claws of a panther, used a bearskin for a
ped blanket and worked up an appetite
on the back of a bucking bronco can't
step into patent leather Shoes nor part
his hair in the middle all at once.
a young woman in the east writes the
5 - that she intends to publish book
OF american legends, and she wants to
know If we have any out in Arizona
Great snakes. but we've got 'em by the
thousands, and an enterprising young wo-
man can sather up carload of EN- in
week without costing her a cent. We
bumped right up agin a legend the very
nrst night we struck this town, and we've
hao EN- after US ever since. Last SUM
mer when we were out hunting on Bill
Williams mountains, an old Indian chief
informed us of legend that white man
and marry his daughter Gazella and stock
Up his wigwam with bacon flour and
WHISKY: He had the gal right there, and
insisted that 1t was time for the legend
10 begin business, and we had to move.
camp fourteen miles to get rid of our
bargain.
The cowboys over on the by 4 ranch
have a legend that a white man with long
Ealr ana dlstingue appearance will come
along some day on cayuse and court
eously. permit himself to be hauled up to
limb in order to furnish them with a
clrcuis performance. After they had
chased and fred upon us three Of four
times and we got it through our head
that we were the white man described in
the legend, and since then we have ram
bled in another direction. We love large.
lat. plump legend, but we have had a sore
throat on several occasions, and don
want any more of them.
An old chap came into town the other
day riding a wall-eyed mule end carving
a legend under his arm 1t was a legend
to the effect that if he got drunk and
whooped around and shot at the gilt
rooster on the cupola of the town hall
he'd find big silver deposit before the
summer was over. He got drunk. and he
whooped, and he also got jagged for sixty
days, but maybe everything will come cut
al right We can't promise the Young
woman lobster forks cut-gIass finger
bowls or red-bordered towels out this way:
but. as for legends. she can't throw a
club without bringing down two or three.
Win the fur IN prime CONDITIONAL Quad
IN New York Recorder.