The star. (Reynoldsville, Pa.) 1892-1946, 1894-12-24
EFFECTIVE ALARMS.
THE RETIRED BURGLAR TELLS OF
AN ANNOYING EXPERIENCE.

We encountered Most Remarkable Sys-
tenn of Burglar Alarms In House with
Unlocked Doors-Bells, Tin Pans and a
Baseball Bat-The Explanation.
zone night late, said tho retired
burglar, 81 won't into house in Il vii.
lago in western Connecticut, entering
by q cellar window, as ! usually did
when was late so rs not to disturb
the folks. looked around the cellar
and located the stairs and started up.
About thrco.quarters Of the way up q
rope that was stretched across caught
me under the chin and topplcd me over
down stairs, There was only the stone
wall Of the cellar on ono side and no
rail on the other, so there was nothing
to grab to, and just tumbled down
As l bumped along something scattered
along down with me, whang banging
down the steps over mo and under me
and around mo, chasing me all the way
down, and when finally got to the cell
lar bottom that thing was lying across
my chest. 1t was the coal shovel, which
had evidently been stood up against the
rope and which | had Jared loose.
"But the worst thing Of all was that
my lamp was broke. lc t my jimmy
ON tho way down, but hung on to my
lamp, but now the light was out and
the glass was broke, ana the slide was
jammed around in front, and l could
not turn it. felt around till found
my jimmy, and then waited to see if
I'd woke anybody up. didn't hear
anybody, and so l started again, and
this time l felt my way up the stairs
carefully to the door. found il unlock
ed, and l had got it open about an inch,
should think, when heard littlo bit
Of scraping on the other side, and the
next instant the drcadfulest racket that
anybody ever heard, the falling of a
dishpan that must have been hanging
on tho other side on the doorknob or
tho key, and at the same time what
imagine must have been the potato
masher-I don't know, because didn't
look for it-dropped from tho top of the
door upon my head.
'This door to tho cellar opened from
littlo square hall or entry way that
had, rs I learned by feeling, q door to
the left, to the kitchen, suppose, and
ono to the right, l guessed, into the
front hall. WAITED again, but no sound
from up stairs, so turned to tho right
and opened that door and stumbled the
first thing over chair close by in the
hall and almost broke my shins. felt
along and found a row Of chairs stand.
ing close together from that door clean
to the front door. sat down in ono OF
them and nursed my shin and waited
Still no sound, and tried again, and
got along all right this time, and turned
off to the loft and into the parlor, and
back from. that into the dining room,
for wonder without falling over any
thing, and l began to feel encouraged.
But in tho dining room there was moth.
ing but plated spoons and forks, which
of course could tell by the touch just
as well as though I'd had an electric
light. If they had any silver, they had
carried it up stairs. as some people dc
at night.
II turned back into the hall and
groped my way through that row Of
chairs to the foot of the stairs. To make
sure of the first step in the dark step
ped high and stepped into pan of wa
ter on the bottom step. That made mo
mad, but didn't make any noise, and
1 stepped out of it and started ON up
At about the third step my leg struck a
string that was strung across these stairs
and set bell a-ringing that was hang
ing on 1t, and kicking that string start.
ed down on me from above a shower Of
pie plates. and presently fell over Il
wash boiler that had been set on the
stairs step OF two up and brought that
down on me.
"As ! was floundering around in this
tinware and string and bells and things
l heard children's voices up stairs, and
a minute later heard steps in the hall
above, and l could see in the blackness
up there the white of a nightgown at
the head of the stairs. Then something
came slamming against the banisters,
hitting me as it ratified down and final.
ly landing with great bang ON the
floor among tho chairs in the hall. The
minute he threw it, whoever he was,
he ran, and l began to think it was
about time for me to go too. Ihad freed
myself from the bellcord by this time.
and got down the stairs and into the
hall again. and there this time 1 step
ped on baseball bat--that was what
had come banging down at me from
aboye-that rolled out from under me