Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1894-09-13
@ GREAT GROVER!
MAY TIE PRAYER or TIE RIGHT
EOU9 AVAIL US MUCH.

&c s2,oFse In PARALLELS, but Now Ills People
Izave True Cna%astantling-ae Prepareth
ITEM Tor Life of Ease and Plenty.
They Toll Not; Neither Do They Eat.
@ great and all wise Grover, once
more we thank thee for thy bountiful
goodness toward US.
O great master, we thank thee for the
privilege OF putting sacl1cloth upon our
backs and Of sitting in ashes and OF eat
| ING thy free trade soup.
O great master. we know that thou
speahest in parallels to us, for hast thou
not said IL one Of thy speeches that
wheat would be worth 81 % per bushel,
and that wages would be high if we
would only make thee cur president?
Now, great master, it is all clear to US
that thou speallest III parallels, and that
thy meaning was that, when Mckinley
and Reed should be elected in 1896,
then we shouldst receive a high price
Tor our wheat and high wages for
our labor. But, great master, we love
| thee still, fer we know that when thou
art done with rs that we will be fit sub
/ iects for dime museum, there to earn
plenty and rest in peace.
@ great master, we know that the
Breckenridge scandal has grieyed thee
sorely, and we know that when thou art
grieyed thou gcest a-hshing in Blizzard S
bay.
0 great master, the supply Of thy
Cleveland badges is running short. The
season OF the bowling blizzards is ap-
preaching, and we have not the where
withal to replace thy badges.
O great master, we know thou hast
often told rs that the road ct q free
trader is q hard road to travel ia this
country, but blessed is lie that endureth
to the END, even though his friends be
not able to recognize him.
# thou wilt only veto this Wilson
bill, we will stand by thee firmly till
1896. Thea we will hurrah loudly for
Mckinley and Reed.
Q great Grover, we are growing thin
upon tho Substance OF things doubtful
and things not seen. Wilt thou not do
something, Q great master, before thy
term Of Office dost EXPIRE for then thou
wilt lie a nobody, q nincompoop with
10 power and not able to do anything
Q great master, what is congress do
ing? Is it STEPPED il the silJ1rian mud
OF partisan prejudice OF hidden by the
vapor rising midst its panpered imag-
nation. Tt has blown its trumpet long
and loud, but it has done lis no good.
0 great master, has this great con-
Gress which was Oh thy hands dropped
through the crater into the lnire and
stuck there? OF q truth, master, there
is bat little danger that archaeological
research will ever uneaTth its lonely
habitat, for is it not true, Q Grover,
that only the crudest fossils exist ia
that lower strata?
O great Grover, that free trade song
which thou has sung is but as chest
nut It has been sung and sung and
sung again with variations. Yea, verify,
it has been sung time and timo again
until al the people have grown weary
CT it's dull monotone
O great master, why hast thou not
done something Ill these long 5 months
Of our weary wait, thou who hast had
to bear with the lean of thy kind? 1t
would even be merciful act, Q great
and good Mr.. Grover, to drive us from
this earthly existence, for we are long
ing, longing, longing for a change.
JOHN D. VIM.
Independence, Or.
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