davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
SENATORIAL COURTESY.
How the Italian Ambassador Got Nv,
with the French Ambassador.

How the italian Ambassador Got kven
with the French Ambassador.
Before the introduction of the tele-
graph ambassadors at foreign courts
used to be far moro important person
ages than they now are, and great
rival grandeur existed among them.
Or. one occasion, says Cassells Satur-
day Journal, q new Italian minister
had arrived at the Spanish capital.
and went en- suite to pay his respects
TO the reigning sovereign Arriving
at one of the reception-rooms to the
palace, he found IL occupied by an i'm
posing-looking man surrounded by a
glittering throng. These he not I'M
naturally took to be the king and bis
courtiers, aud with profound obeisance
introduced himself.
The supposed king received him with
gracious condescension till the doors
opened and an even more magnificent
train ushered in the real king aad
showed to the discounted Italian that
he had been kneeling fefore his hated
rival, the French ambassador, who
took no pains to conc cal his satisfac-
ton at the fiatteriDg mistake. But
his triumph was not % last, for in the
evening of the same day the king,
with the italian as his partner, was
playing cards against the French min
lister and third ambassador, when in
the course of the game the Italian
threw down a card, exclaiming: That
is the king and it wins us the triekI'
His partner looked at it and said:
mo! You only played the lznave."
20, beg your majesty's pardon, so
I have!' and with quick glance at
his French opponent he continued:
''and it is the second time to-day that
have mistaken knave for kingl"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
"sweet sixteen"

The beautiful calendars sent out by
c. l. Hood & Co., of Lowell, Mass,
have attracted much attention in all
parts of the country. The calendar
bears the head of lovely girl, ''swcet
sixteen" autographed in delicate col
ors. Over eight millions of these calen-
dars were made. G. |. Hood & Co, as
is well known, are the proprietors OF
Hoods Sarsaparillo, which is every
where a household word on account of
the wonderful cures that have been eff
fected by means of this great blood
purifier. Hoods Sarsaparilla is made
in building which 7 We largest in
the world devoted t the D.siness of
making a medicine, nd this great indus
try has been built up within few
years by the absolute merit of Hoods
Sarsaparilla.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
A LITTLE INFORMATION.

THREE million American citizens Of
over thirty years of age were unmar-
ried in 1890.
THERE are two mountains in lower
California that are estimated to con-
tain ten million tons of pure alum.
THE Chautauqua salute. waving
white handkerchief, was first given at
the request of Chancellor Vincent, as
a greeting to a deaf-mute.
New YORK and Massachusetts, have
each been represented in the cabinet
twenty-eight times. Pennsylvania fol-
lows with twenty-five representations.
IN every land between Spitzbergen
and Patagonia there is some species of
the common blood-sucking mosquito.
In British America and Alaska they
are very large and troublesome.
THE first aerial voyage was made
September 10, 1888, by sheep. cock
and duck to height ofone thousand
five hundred feet. The first human trav-
eler through the air was NJ. Francois
Pilatre de Rozier, who mounted the
following month in free balloon.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
THE APARTMENT HOME.
Men Like It and STAY In Sights-Its Ad
vantage TO Women.

vantage TO Women.
There is one thing about living in
big apartment house, SAID a gentle
man who has recently begun the ex.
pertinent of this kind of existence in
New York, that most people. am
convinced, have not taken seriously
into consideration. 1t is that il is
sort of reformatory element in life.
have come to the conclusion that these
houses am speaking of those with
out cafes (real family hotels)-are do
ing a silent and effective work in bet
tering the habits of men and exercis-
ing an unconsciously-felt influence
upon women. / notice in the house
where / am living. where / have Gu
apartment OF several rooms with bath,
that when | get into nov rooms do not
care to go out again in the evening ex-
cept it i to visit some place of amuse-
ment or the home of tome friend with
my family. We have little world of our
own, surrounded by all that is comfort.
able and comforting, and the old desire
to get out with the boys seems to have
died out. The place is so cosy and in.
viting, and it is so removed from the
low seems to forget all the outside in.
fluences that used to draw him from
the cherries quarters he had in some
conventional clearinghouse. Yes. sir,
the men are kept at home.
II do not draw the conclusions from
myself alone, but / can see the thing
in the average man living in the same
building with me. They're all home
bodies; and il gets around to me from
the female side of the establishment
that most of the husbands are
changed men, that they used to be
fond of getting out for a good time,
now they are confirmed stayers in. ]
am sure that this mode of life is the
Jest for people of moderate means in a
city like New York. 1t is a benefit to
the women, too. They get rid of the
annoying servant-cook or chamber.
maid-that has worried their life out;
they escape the opportunities and i'm.
pertinences of the butcher, baker, cor
ner grocer, and so on; they are nc
longer tired to death from running up
and down interminable flights of stairs
all day long; they have nothing or little
to annoy them, beyond certain small
things that must always come with
every mode of life, and they can give
their time to something improving to
themselves and to the development of
their children. ! think it is unjust to
charge that VIC aen thus conditioned
are given over to idleness and gadding;
I for my observation is that such is not
the case. | know two or three large
apartment houses, with restaurants.
and where there is no housekeeping
going on-regular hotels. in fact, but
without the checrlessness of hotel
and have come to the conclusion that
the ladies in them are happier, more
regular in their domestic life, and less
disposed to str ct life than are the ma.
jority of those who fly from home to
escape the annoyances of housekeep-
4 ing or the domination of those abso-
lutte tvrants-servants- IN. Y. Sun.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01

because She also loved this man she
poisoned his mind against YOU And
then l see Inuney-heaps OF money.
An, yes. you were rich, and she made
You believe he wished 10 marry you for
the sake OF that money. and you be-
lieycd her and then" and here she
paused a moment as ii in doubt.
YES. and then" quickly interposed
Mrs Fairfax. her eyes fixed on the
other woman's face in an eager ex-
citei way.
And then. you and he quarreled, the
other woman feeding re danes of
anger"
Here she paused for moment. look
ing fiXedly AT Mrs Fairfax, then went
on in n deliberate voice
Il should advise you 20 beware of
her. She is utterly interruptions, and
would not, and in fact al not. hesitate
- DO you an injury.
''She mas Teen the means of wreck
ing youc happiness, out / see that one
day Won will confront aud Overwhelul
her with hex perfidy She succeeded in
marrying the man yCu loved.
Her she paused again FOR a moment
Ii = very curious" she went on,
''how your lives seem la9ueneed by
each other Here i a lie Ia suicide;
your old lover died ~ lis own hand
when he learnt how he had been
iUps5. vneu ne Learnt that the evil he
had belle ed about you was not true
lie learned il too late, however. for
he Vas Il -ried. and il was his wife
VINO had told the lies about You in Or
der that he Should turn from YOU 10
Isq The news Of his death was a
great shock - you; then followed an
illness, then came your marriage. with
man who loves you but whom Is yet
you 10 not really love, for the memory
of the lost lover is still strong upon
YOU But in the future see YOU will
grow 10 love your husband: he will win
your love by the force of his great
strong love for you"
Mrs fairfax opened her lips as IL TO
speak; they moved. but no sound came;
then, slowly rising from her seat. she
leaned forward, saying in quick. hard
n tOrss:
'.Nc more, no more-you have told
me enough That = lan was a cruel
" malicious woman. Had it been a
man he would have been called a
seouudrel She is not worthy OF the
name of woman; she is she devil. and
j hate her for the cruel wrong she did
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
COLLEGE GIRLS REVENGE.
The President Was Punished and the Girls
Were Happy.

"They may talk about the college
boys and their hazings and tricks, but
for real genuine fun you can't beat the
college girl" said a young freshman
the other day. Last year-you know
the mems college is right near our SEM
mary. and so they call on us every
evening-the president made a new
rule.
HE declared that we must dismiss
our guests at $50. and we decided we
would not do il. After a great deal of
plotting and planning we hit upon a
delightful plan, and it was a great
success. The boys secured big bas-
ket and ran two ropes and pulley
for us. and this we hid during the day
and at night fastened to two great
hooks on the sill of our study window.
The boys sent up their cards in the
basket, and then after inspecting
them with a lantern to make sure they
were not burglars we hauled them up.
But one night the grave and digni-
Sed president caught us and planned n
little surprise for us. He found one of
the boys cards in our rooms and placed
il in the basket. 1t worked beautiful
anu VIC MIN uP w
fore any one thought of using the Ian
tern. Then Miss Flyaway held it ouJ
the window and took a peep at him.
One glance at the spectacles and bald
head was enough. 1t was lucky for
that president that we did not let him
fall to the ground in our horror and
amazement, but we held on to the
ropes until we decided what to do.
1--WE couldn't let him down again. he
would only come up and catch us, and
we couldn't drop him, bad as he was,
and we certainly didn't intend to help
him carry out his plan by hauling him
up, so wescompromised by securing the
ropes and letting him hang there in
midair. He begged and implored to be
let down, offered us any bride we could
wish for, and wasted more elOquence
on us in that first hour than he lid
during his yearly lectures. But We
had no visitors that night; ne amused
us and we wanted revenge, so we left
him. He tried to jump, to climb down
the wall and up on the rope, but failed
in everything. At last he howled.
yelled like an Indian till everyone in
the town was aroused, and even the
boys turned out to see the terror of
their worst Nightmares, crimson with
rage, suspended in midair in a clothes
basket. N. Y. Advertiser.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
STRANGE THINGS ABROAD.

SrREET-cAR ambulances are used In
France.
A DENMARK old maids insurance
company pays regular weekly "bene-
fits" to spinisters of forty years and up
wards.
IL the rivers of Surinam there is a
fish that has four perfect eyes, two on
each side of the head, one above the
other.
THERE is bold ridge of gray vol
canic mountains in the Cape Verde is
lands, the crest of which is said to
form an exact likeness of George Wash
ington.
EXPEDITION ISLAND, tract of land
thirteen miles long ard from one and
one-half to two miles wide, lying off
the coast of Australia, has entirely dis
appeared beneath the waves. No one
knows when the island vanished and
there is no cause assigned for its disap-
,1aa
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01

The discovery proved too much for
her and. staggering forward. she fell
down, senseless heap.
Dear. dear: Poor thing-the heat
upset her, I've no doubt But what
pity, just as | wanted to have my for
tune told too; it's really too prOvok.
ing" So said one of the crowd Of ladies
who had gathered round the faintinR
woman, thereby preventing any air
there might have been from getting at
her. "You managed to have yours told.
didn't you. Mrs. Fairfax" the same
lady went on
Yes. had my past history told very
we'll"
i've often heard" went on the for.
mer speaker, that that kind of thing
takes it ont of people very much, don't
you think it dOes?'
In this case think that what she
has told has upset Mrs Dallas very
much indeed, and I'm very sorry for
her; YOU see, sometimes the truth is sc
very hard 10 tell" with which some
what ambiguous speech Mrs. Fairfax
turned and left the group.
Yes. think | am sorry for her, poor
wretch she said to herself. Her life
has been a very miserable one, | should
think, IL she has any conscience.
Some day / may be able to forgive
her the injury she did me. l suppose
it's very wicked Cor me not to feel for
giving at once" And Mrs Fairfax
looked rs IL she were arguiL g with her
self But she was mean - me,
though" she went on. Never mind,
I'll not think of it any more the past
is done with; must now work out my
future. Poor Jack is dead, but my hus-
band loves me, and all this time | never
knew it So l suppose must work out
my fate. It is Kismet, and for the
future think it will be a very happy
one +"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01

me. should like her TO know that
think her despisable beyond words"
And with this Mrs Fairfax turned,
trembling with excitement and went
hurriedly out of the tent, much IN the
bewilderment of Mrs Dallas.
BY the time Mrs. Fairfax reached the
stall where her friend was, however,
all traces Of her excitement had passed
away, except glittering. angry light
in the usually rather dreamy gray eyes.
making them now look almost black.
well, Nellie. was Il good fortuae?"
said her friend.
GOOD! She told me the whole of my
story. our story; spared no details. and
warned me Of the treachery of wom-
an She has prt herself in my power
completely. II she only knew it. just
go, k5.:as, and tell her whose fortune
she has just been telling so truthfully.
and watch her face as she hears it."
DO you really wish me 10 tell her?'
Edith replied. 1T won't do any good +"
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
FLEET-FooTEo zEBRAS.



The rapidity with which the differ
snt zebras have been exterminated.
owing to the advance of civilization in
South Africa, is shown by reference to
such works as that of Sir CORVALLIS
Harris, written in 1870, in which the
author tells us that the quagga was at
the time found in ''interminable
herds" bands of many hundreds being
frequently seen, while he describes
Burchell's zebra as congregating in
herds Of eighty or one hundred, and
Astounding TO a great extent; but now,
after the expiration of but fifty years,
the one species is extinct or practical
ly So. while the other has been driven
much farther afield and its numbers
are yearly being reduced.
This authors description of the COM
mon zebra is well worth repeating. lie
says: Seeking the widest and most
sequestered spots, naughty troops are
exceedingly difficult to approach, as
we'll on account of their extreme
agility and fieetness of foot as from
the abrupt and inaccessible nature of
their highland abode.
Under the special charge of a sell
tinel, so posted on some adjacent crag
as to command view of every avenue
Of approach, the checkered herd whom
painted skins adorn' is to be viewed
oerambulating some rocky ledge. on
which the rifle ball alone can reach
them.
mo sooner has the note OF alarm
been sounded by the vidette than.
oricking their long ears. the whole
flock hurry forward to ascertain the
nature of the approaching danger. and,
having gazed a moment at the advanc-
.ng hunter, whisking their brindle
tails aloft, helter-skelter away they
thunder, down craggy precipices and
over yawning ravines, where no less
agile foot could dare to follow them"
OF Burchelrs zebra he says: Pierce,
strong, feet and unsurI assingly beau
.iful. there is perhaps no auadruped in
the creation, not even excepting the
mountain zebra, more splendidly at
tired or presenting picture of more
singulary attractive beauty" Zebras
are by no means amiable animals, and
though many of the stories told of
heir ferocity are doubtless much exag-
yerated, they have SO far not proved
themselves amenable to domestication.
London Saturday Review.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
AN EFFECTIVE REMEDY.
But II Gave the Housemaid Great Frigh

But IL Gave the Housemaid a Great Fright.
Chemistry as deterrent of crime Is
yet undeveloped, but there is a certain
young man in this city who has made
some remarkable advances in that di-
rection.
Although he has spent much of his
life in hotels and boarding-houses. he
lost his patience the other day when
We're subject to strange and mex
plicable disappearance.
He complained to the landlady, but
for all that the mysterious disappear
ances continued. Bottle after bottle of
cologne suffered from most mysterious
leakage, and, to add to his other woes,
his whisky just as strangely disap-
peared. He suffered as long as human
endurance suffers before rising to the
sticking point, and then he laid a trap
for the offender.
At dinner that evening the dessert
was about to he brought in when a
series of piercing shrieks came from
the direction of his bedroom. The
boarders rushed upstairs. On the up
per landing there sat what was recog-
nized as the wreck of the households
chambermaid. Her face was black as
the skin of Zanzibari negro, and her
hair, carroty red in its natural state,
was streaked and spotted from the
nape of her neck to her forehead. She
was sick-sicller than was ever trans.
atlantic traveller in a hurricane. Be
tween her gasps she raved and shrieked
like maniac, while the young man
laughed heartlessly at her plight.
II am poisoned" shrieked the cham
bermaid, and pointing To the young
man, she yelled with venomous hate,
that man has killed me ~
The situation began to get so strained
that the landlady drew the young man
aside for an explanation. The board
ers. anxious 10 have the mystery ex-
planned, followed.
"What have you done to my maid?"
the landlady asked.
And then it all came out.
"You remember that spoke Of mys-
terious thetts in my rooms?' said the
culprit. 'Well, they did not stop when
complained. SO / took my own precau-
tions that they would not continue.
From the condition of your maid
infer that she has again beer helping
herself to my cologne and whisky.
This circumstantial evidence signifies
that she first took a large drink of
the whisky and then proceeded to
battle in the cologne. To the fact
that there is a quantity of tartar
emetic in the whisky is due her APP
pearance of nausea, alH reasonable
explanation for the peculiar color of
her complexion is the combination of
nitrate of silver with the cologne.
Your chambermaid will he unable
to appear in public for few days, but
/ hardly think that she will disturb
my property again"
All the other boarders agreed with
him. Although the maid did not die
the young man had 10 move. but he
considers that the success of his ex-
pertinent amply repays him for his an
noyance.-St. Louis Post-Dispatch.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
THE POST OFFICE RAT.
lie Has n Weakness for Letters and .
Taste for Wedding Cake.

Taste for Wedding Cake.
Have you ever heard of our post
Office rate" quericd a handler of mail
the other afternoon. as he casght few
moments of leisure ''IIe is a klepto-
maniac, a born thief. / guess" con-
tinurd the clerk. He steals letters
and we cannot keep him from it. He
has taste for wedding cake. too. and
his conscience never restraints him from
indulging IT, We have set trap for
him repeatedly, but he is too wise
for US
The clerk then discours, concern
ing the habits of the distinguished ro-
dent lie hides among the rubbish of
the ROOM" he said. and has several
means of ready access to the outside
world He takes charge of the affairs
when we are out. The other day he
was seen sitting upright at the table
nibbling ut a package Of hickory nut
kernels which happened to be side
tracked during transit through The
mails Not long 20 box of wedding
cake got lost. A card was mailed to
the sender to come and correct the adj
dress She called. but when we looked
for the package il was gone. A feeling
something like that which crept over
Old Mother HuJoSrd when she went to
the cupboard to < 1t here moor dog a
bone gradually gained possession OF
as The rat had made of with the
cake. and the clos, s. search revealed
only fragments q. the precious sweet
meats
I'VE the Ight for long time that
some irquis tive person was taking
certain missives. out our suspicious
proved 10 be unlOl .nded. One day we
discovered several of the missing let
tsrs near 4 hole made by the rat under
. desk lie had taken them as far as
he could, and then had hidden them
-ood-by-"
The rat makes the correcting clerks
Office mis- principal rendezvous 1t is
there that stray letters aud packages
are held Tor time to ascertain their
correct address or for additional post
age. Cleveland Leader.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
LITTLE PLAY-IN-THE-DIRT.

Where IS my little boy, Play-'E-ths Dirt
Catch him who may,
He's run far away.
IN his long. bright eurls and his blue checked
shirt.
My sweet little.
Fleet little.
Play-in-the-Dirt
He has dug a round hole IN the ditch near b.,
'Pinkeds 10 with care,
And left il there
Now Is IL 8 fort or is il s piel
or boat
or q nOats
Who'll tells SotL
The Empire express on the sidewalk lies
suppose I'D slip
On il and trip.
Would be care That careless Plsy-in-the-
Dirt
Would his red top
Hippety hop.
Laughing for Play in-the-Dirt
Where Is my red-cheeked Play-in the-Dirts
Brown coat he wore,
BuiJOns galore;
A smile, q dimple: o yes. quite firt
Ismy sweet little
Fleet little.
Play-in- the-DirL
Rose y. YsVger. in Good Housekeeping
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01
s5. 500 from Ten Acres.

A. NJ. Lamb, a market gardener in
Pennsylvania, cleared $500 on five
acres of cabbage and five acres of
onions. The reason of this, he says, was
because SalZer's seeds are so extremely
early and wondrously productive.
Lightning Cabbage and King of the
Earliest Onions he had in the market
three weeks ahead of any other home
grown sorts, and consequently received
fancy prices. Salzer sends IS packages
earliest vegetable seed, sufficient for a
family, for 81, POSTPAID.
If you WILL CUT THIS OUT AND SEND IT
with &c postage to the John A. Salzer
Seed Co, La Crosse, Wis, you will re-
ceive their mammoth catalogue and a
trial package of Get There, Eli the
sixteen-day radish.
River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1894-02-01

THERE is more Catarrh in this sector. OF
the country than all other diseases put to-
gether, and until the last few years was sup
posed to be incurable. For great many
years doctors pronounced it local disease,
and prescribed local remedies, and by con-
stantly falling to cure with local treatment,
pronounced itincurable. Science has proven
catarrh 10 be constitutional disease and
therefore requires constitutional treatment
Halls Catarrh Cure, manufactured by +. j.
Cheney q Co., Toledo, Ohio, is the only con-
stitutional cure on the market It is taken
internally in doses from 10 drops TO a tea
spoonful 1t acts directly on the blood and
mucous surfaces of the system. They offer
ore hundred dollars for any case IL fails to
cure. Send for circulars and testimonials.
Address, F. J. CHENEY K Co, Toledo, o.
T-Scld by Druggists, 75c.
Halls Family Pills, % cents.