Chicago eagle. [volume] (Chicago, Ill.) 1889-19??, 1894-12-22
our EoNpress For 1lrLss.
Military Designations Plentiful al
B1nckberries.

OUR FONONESS FOR TITLES.
Military Designations Plentiful az
Blackberries.
Say" said the "Kickcr" to writer
for the New York Tribune. "don't tell
me that we Americans do not like Il.
ties. Why. hing 1t, we d6tc on titles.
Just see how many of the rich girls 70
cunning for titles abroad aud IRE will.
ing to accept broken-down specimens
Of humanity for husbands simply be.
cause they call themselves dukes or
marquises or counts or what not. Now,
don't mean to say that we Americans
are anxious to have any orders of no.
bility. But we make up for the lack Of
noble names. Any sort Of title we can
get hold Of is used with vengeance.
Consider military designations, for In
stance. Look over the lists Of people
who are present Mt any public function.
The number of military men Is ast0und-
ing. Where do they come from? The
war has been over nearly thirty years
and q vast number of the officers who
came out of It are dead. But the mum.
Der Of generals, colonies, majors and
OF course the militia of the States fur
nishes good many men. A man 10 ut
the head Of q regiment; he conducts o
drill once week or so. takes part In q
parade few times a year, and per.
haps spends week In State camp.
He makes his living as business or
professional man; his military associa-
tons are merely an incident Of his On.
reer. But to all the world he IL the col.
onel,' and he remains the colonel for.
ever.
''Then look at the military staff Of
Governors. These are usually made
up Of civilians. They don't know any
more about drills and tactics and STRAIT.
egg than Q South Sea Islander does
about the Constitution Of the United
States; and, moreover, they don't learn
any moro while they hold their Offices,
but they get to be known as colonies
and majors and captains; and the titles
stick. Nobody, presume, Is going to
kick against magnifying or manufac.
turing titles. A man may somehow or
other be entitled to be called a lieuten.
ant or a captain, but It frequently hap.
pens that In some inexplicable way he
sooner or later becomes colonel or q
general. This Is especially the case
when he runs for political Office. and
In these instances he rarely stops short
of being full-hedged general, with tho
inferential record of life imperiled,
forts stormed and battles won. I have
even seen the placid and peace. loving
Wanamakcr called general, merely be.
cause he was the Postmaster General
of the United States under President
Harrison.
"But the title TINT kick against In
earnest Is one for which some Of the
newspapers IRE largely responsible.
How the practice ever started I don't
know, unless It was to save space. II
Is the habit Of making title or prefix
Of o mans occupation. This Is becom.
Ing extremely prevalent, especially
among certain newspapers In this city.
We have Lawyer Smith, Banker Jones,
Broker Brown, etc. I have even seen
Butcher Green in print. The worst
case recall was Driver Of the Canal.
boat Mary Jane Timothy Black, capital
letters and oil. A man IL very rich; no
is frequently dubbed Millionaire Jones.
He IL singer; no Is called Tenor de
Throatstrings. He coils ropes on q
steamboat md gets into print as Deck.
hand McGinty. He Is a law.defying
crank and Ii written up as Anarchist
Smithkins. and 30 ON. don't believe
they do such silly things us this any.
where else on earth. The only designa.
tons Of any kind we should have are
official ones; except In Kentucky, ami,
of course, there everyone has an In.
.allenable right to be u colonel"