Staunton spectator. [volume] (Staunton, Va.) 1849-1896, 1894-01-24

disagreeable thing happen to him. M.
Lamantin sent for his architect. who
fastened to come, smellii an order.
is that all?' he said, vexed when he
learned what the matter was.
II think that is quite enough. 1t is
not amusing to own a chimney that
makes my wife and myself weep all
day long, like family recently affiict-
ed.
Your chimney was Euilt on my
plans. That means it does not smoke.
but it does smoke.
Because YOU burn Mons coal. Don't
burn Mons. Burn wood. and you will
have clear fire.
Perhaps you are right.
The change to wood in place of coal
did not make the chimncy's s breathing
easier. NJ. Lamantin, who was a reso-
lutte man, sent for the best architect in
Paris and begged him to deign to come
in person to study the question.
The artist, after having minutely ex-
amined the chimney, did rot scruple to
restrain this cruel reflection on his
brother in art, "What ass built this
chimney
1T was Ledente, my architect.
1T was well said; an ass. Have the
fue made four inches higher, in order
to increase the draft. 1t will be all
right then
"What simple matter it is, after
alll''
1t only needed a little thought y
The operation completed the Chin
ney smoked as before. But the great
architect took care of his bill.
Hang it, what bill!' M. Laman-
tin could not help signing as he paid it.
Disguised with architects, the house
holder turned to bricklayers. The first
one called in ordered the addition to
the fue of piece of sheet iron in the
form of serpent.
The chimney continued to send out
its smoke into the parlor.
A second bricklayer arrived; with
disgust he had his colleagues serpent
removed and substituted fer it a sort of
helmet of the same material.
The chimney did not pay any atten-
ton to the helmet, but smoked worse
than ever.
But here the concierge interposed
with these consoling words: 'Sir, you
are wrong to despair. l was just this
moment talking of this matter with
one of the tenants I must say it,
such nice tenant! He told me that
he would undertake to disenchant your
chimney in five minutes.
Let him come to me instantly, or
give him notice to leave
AS quick IS lightning Passeraud put
himself at the orders of M. Lamantin.
He found his landlord tramping up and
down his parlor, which was as cold as
ice.
'Ah, it is you, young man, who flat
ter yourself you can cure in five min
utes chimneys incurably Ill. Try; l
am curious to see you do it.
Five minutes is little too short a
time, sir. want an hour
Very well-an hour. Here is
chimney given up by all the doctors.
If you make it agree to send its smoke
up into the skies instead of down into
my apartments. will give you what
you wish. | am quite out of patience.
do not wish to bargain. Name your
price
Sir, answered Passeraud, with dig
nifty, "you will give me-the hand of
Mile. Valentine. That is my price
to be paid only after have succeeded. "
For chimney You wander in
your talk, my dear sir. y
This chimney, sir? Send for M.
GARNER, the architect of the opera; add
to him picked jury of engineers,
chemists, mem bers of the institute pro-
fessors from the Ecole des Hautes
Etudes, and if these gentlemen can do
in three months what l undertake to do
in an hour-that is to say, prevent it
from smoking-as also to prevent from
smoking all chimneys with the same
trouble, agree that you should treat
me as though were indeed raving." F"
1.-THE hand of my daughterl That is
high price. However, if really you
do possess such a secret, you will be
able to make money, great deal Of
money, and''--
81 have secret in reality, and as I
have high opinion of it you will give
me authority to shut myself alone in
this parlor for an hour, and you will
give me your word not to look through
the keyhole only go to work on that
condition"
LAS you please. But why have you
not simply taken out patent? You
would avoid these childish precau-
tiols.
Il am not rich enough to pay the
first premium on patent"
Borrow the money. This is case
for borrowing, if ever there was one. -
"Sir, l hate borrowing.
well, | am going. Perform your
mysterious operations in peace and
tranquility.
You will not look through the key
hole?"
II give you my most solemn prom
ise.'
"And-I have your word-if sue
ceed?"
1--WE will see. do not want to yield
on compulsion, butt am just man. -
Once alone, Passeraud wasted no
timein foolish proceedings rather out
of place, the gravity of tho circum-
! stances considered. An attentive spec
tator-but Passeraud had banished
spectators-would have heard him hum
the air:
C'cst lei que Rose respire!
The same surprised spectator would
have seen him so from one piece of fur
niture to another with a delighted air,
walking as in dream among the beau
tiful furniture, extend himself at full
length upon the sofa-here Valentine
must have sat!-then install himself IN
a small chair--this low seat is with
out doubt the one she prefors!-then
gaze for long while at young girl s
portrait-that is her dear picture!-and
throw kisses to ito you. even to you!
These frivolous proceedings having con-
sumed the appointed go minutes, Pas
seraud opened the doors and called ev-
ery ene