Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1894-01-11
Let Us An Laugh.


mira Gazette.
WHEN young ladies preside at
church tea they reign as well as pour
Lowell Courier.
WHAT an awful blow 1t would be
to long haired musician to become
bald -AtchisOn Globe.
IT is impossible to have the last 4
word with chemist, because he al
ways has a retort.-BOston Courier.
PATIENT-"Doctor, feel that am
at deaths door," Doctor (enthusias-
tically)-"Oh, don't fear. Well pull
you through. Puck.
BRIDE-Why do they give us so
many things we are too poor to use?
Groom-Yos, this cookbook, for In
stance. Detroit Tribune.
WHEN people are slow and behind
the times there is nothing like count
ing them to bring them to their
census. Rochester Democrat.
SHE-"All of which convinces me
that you married me for my money"
He-"Well, 1t may not seem probable,
but l honestly loved you. Life.
TEACHER-"What happened when
the man killed the goose that laid
the golden egg?" Dick Hicks-"His
goose was cooked. brooklyn Life.
"DID Dumley's marriage involve
any financial responsibility" "Oh,
yes; his wife requires him to earn
enough to pay his laundry bills. >
Judge.
BELovED-"Why, what time to
be calling! It's half-past 8. The
lights are out at TO-" Lover-'Just
like me. I'm always early. Detroit
Tribune.
SPECrAToR-Doesn't it require a
! deal of courage to go up in balloon?
Aeronaut-Not bit, ma'am. It's
the coming down in it.-Boston
Transcript.
TRAMP-"Please, mum, have y2
any cold vittles?" Housekeeper7Rs
am sorry to say sir, that eyerytMin
is hot" Slams the door, -fNe
York Weekly.
TRAvELER--"Will you flndKout fc
me when the next train4 moves?
/, The Other Mani find oY 1t? Why
, man, I'm a police detect I've. BIO,
, ton Transcript.
, WOOL suppose it's Not com
3 mendable thing to con 1fess, but
! must say | hate children" Va
Q Pelt-"Why don't You join MI
. Gerry's society?"-IEffe.
Miss SOFTLY WHO has been al
9 tending a course Of lectures)-"Q
e Professor, saw Jsuch funny old fol
e sill in the museu m to-day! though
Il of you at once. Vogue.
= STUDENT-"Y will tell you frankl
Q that / shall ngt be able to pay %
G the suit till Eext year. When WI
h you have it ready?" Tailor-"Ne e.
> year. "-F'lieEende Batter.
a IL SEE your hired man is an octo
y room" "Oh, mo. He's a white man
~ He's been eating some Of my dau9h
!, ters cooking-school experiments ID:
L week and he's bilious. Judge.
- TEACHER-"Can any of you tell M
= what is meant by home industries1
\ Billy Bright (pronptly)-"Up to J1u
"a house they're mostly sawin wood az
j carryin in c9af-Buffalo Courier
,f HIcKszS'Cold in DEATH. Do yo
1T think that a good expressio nP
III Wicks-zett depends a good deal qpol
N the kin a life which has been le
as s BY I'll deceased. Boston 1Far
a AT THE SALON. you te q nj
a. what that picture representa-" Ihi,
is Queen Cleopatra. Have you nv,
c. heard Of herr" Never in my Iiff
l so seldom read the papers. . NIb
r, transigeant. ~
In "Made an awful mistake attu
Gotrox's reception. Stepped u 4
he one of the guests and told hmo &
call me horse and carriage" "Df
n he do it," mo. He called me al
a ass. "-Indianapolis Journal.
MATRIMONIAL ADVERTISEMENT
re "A lady, young, pretty, bright an
&c poor, desires to make the acquaint
ance of a man with the opposlt
T. qualities, with a view to a happ
ID marriage. "-Fliegende Blaetter.
% CHoLLY-I should hate to MARI
such bright woman. Why, Lad
{. week her husband sent her a tel
~ gram saying he should stay late
g the Office and she sent an answer
the club that she would sit up till !
Life.
,s DEACON GooDE-"I hear that M
. Tollings is very i'll. 1t is no doubt
,o trying time with you at home" I'd
= lings-"You may we'll say thu
u deacon. Taking care OF the furDaS
70 is alone enough to make lie mlsera
IN BILE. Boston Transcript.
We "WHERE is Ella?" "She left tn
8. ballroom few minutes ago, sayinI
In that she didn't fancy being squeeze,
Fl in the crowd" "Was Charley witt
her?" Eyes; and l think that b,
w this time he has found place wher
n. there is no crowd. Judge.
IN VIsIToR-I am most grieved L
G. learn of your mistress illness. Moth
ing serious; no great cause for alarm
ID / trust? The New French Maid
ID No, monsieur; nozzing bceg, nozzinI
5, grande. Someslng-what you cal
y, leetle. petite. Visitor-What is it
lie The New French Maid--Eet is VIVA
n zey call &c Observation-Disclosures
81 -Tid-Bits.