The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1894-12-03
UNFEELING WOMEN.
MANY WHO ARE so CALLED ARE
GROSSLY misunderstood.

A witty and sympathetic man once
said to me, 81 would rather marry a
woman who looked feelings and had
none than o woman who had feelings
and looked none" OF course the say
ing came more from his wit than his
sympathy, but / could not help feeling
that there were moments when / could
agree with him, although / have known
the value and the services Of the woman
with no feelings to be underestimated.
My daughters have a friend--a won
an only a little past girlhood-whose
company is more sought after and rel
ished than that of almost any one /
know. She has admirers by the score and
acquaintance everywhere, and no won
der, for she is cultivated, always cheer
full and will listen to and rally the poor
est talker. She is asked to everything
in the shape of a feast, for she is the
amusement and relaxation of whoever
may DO about her. At the same time,
whenever her praises are sounded, the
eulogy winds up with the inevitable and
disheartening tag, AFTER all, you know,
she has no feelings"
And this is perfectly true. Quick and
comprehending as Is her smile and
graceful as is her glance while one Is
talking to her, there is always the con-
viction that not q trace of real interest
is involved. II she only had a heart,
the girl would be an angel.
like the old fashioned word. And
when I have been alone with her / have
often wanted to say, my dear, do DO
an angsli' But she has no heart. If she
were to marry a foreigner and go abroad
to live, she would leave US all without
q moments regret. So her friends are
vexed with her want Of feeling and
warn the world against her.
And this is what seems to me unjust.
Take this girl as she lie. Whether it
is her nature or not, she never refuses
the challenge to be agreeable; whatever
her own plans and likings are, she never
betrays impotence when they are
crossed. Her companion may be plain,
awkward and tiresome, but her eye and
her gay little joke are never dullsd for
that reason. In fine, she may be the in
carpation of the light which shines, but
does not warm, yet while she keeps a
whole circle in good humor by her wit,
as she does, it is o poor return to grid
at her.
Again, and speaking now of q widely
different type, / can call to mind older
women, often only the survivors of a
more rigid era-exact, severe. stern, I'M
bending and ruling their households
with a rod of iron. How little this gen
Grafton understands them! How little
merit it allows to the implicit faigf ip
duty, the untiring devotion to work, the
almost fanatic hatred Of waste and sell
indulgence and the Spartan maxiIns Of
life in which they were brought up and
which they still observe. What has be.
come of our eyes that we cannot see the
beauty of such lives? Why do we nc
longer recognize their value? These are
not the women who have feelings, but
look none. They are without feelings al
all, according to the standards OF ou1
new, diversified and exacting society.
hear young girls saying that their
grandmothers or aunts, or what You
please, don't understand them, and
really / think that many older people
than these schoolgirls make just the
same absurd complaint. / can appeal
with safety to every one. Who has not
known one of these same stern women
almost bring the dead to life by hen
powers of nursing, or confront single
handed and maintain her family on q
beggar's pittance, or save a falling
household by simple economy and hard
work? / shall be told that all these
things are admitted, but that is just the
point-they are not. IL they were, the
cry of mo feelings would never be
raised, out of very shame.
know am old lady who has had the
misfortune to live . long life and to sec
all her descendants grow mp unable &c
Understand her. She ID OF the old,
unsparing sort, and they, artistic, orig.
inal, clever, modern people, have nc
place for her either in their theories o.
their interests. With these her notions
can scarcely be expected to agree either,
vet the complaints come not from her,
but from them. They are not complaints
in words. They are complaints crystal
LIKED into entire disregard for the oil
school, which does not, as it cannot
WHOLLY sympathize with them. It SEEM
to take an outsider, like myself, 20 So
what I do see-that without this erect
white haired ancestress, who is appar
, entity so separate from them all, wive
| and husbands both would have to teacl
| themselves the fortitude which she com
municates merely by her presence
| Their households would be dragging o
: without the strong axles, SO to speak
: which she put in almost unnoticed II
each newly married couple, and tn
n whole family, now held together in o
. unusual yigor, would o fall apar
and be dispersed
81 I believe there must be many snc
I cases. I have the deepest respect e
these strong, ~unbending characters VIII
Il do not conceal their utter intolerance {
our self conferred modern methods :
II May tombstone in Ladies' Home Jon
nal ssHHs
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