davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
SAGE LEEVS.

Eddytd by J. BILLINGS SAGE suksesscr tew
Josh Billings. deseest.
Leevs from mi diurry air kalled sage leevs
beckaws tina air good medysun fur the blews.
wood ruther hev l ownce NV karractur
than pound and y NV reputashun.
xxx
Wen gilt tired NV liphe, shell iether
kline tire err jne the A. =. A., Pm mott
surtin wicli.
The rezun sum foaxs hev so wife gar
ment IL beekaws tina hev nevur saw a
mud puddle tew git intew
%x%
About seven-tenths Nv the foax who air
SO good owe it tew the phakt that tina
hewitt gott ambishun enuff tew dew evil
Xxx
The rezun I nevur ware silk hat il
I'm tew prowd tew be tux fur surkiss
man, and mott good enuH tew be TUX fur
a preechur.
*x*
Wen / heer a man tawkin Nv the witc-
robed throng, vile the terbakker juse IL
runnin down hiz chin, mi fayth in human
natur groze week.
xx*
A man who il so konshenshus that he
returns borrerd umburell, ort tew keep
out Nv law and pollytiks, he'd pheel
loansum in sech sosiety,
wv
Sum NY mi wizest sayins wair slo tew
git the popyewler notiss wich tina ort tew
hev, but wen tina gott Billings gait on
tew 'cm tina went like mad hogg
NIX
Sum wimmen maik me think Nv ainjels
butt lit IL mott SO mulch THAR goodness ez
lit IL the wings on THAR bunnets-tha
most alwais hev fethurs in THAR hat.
*x*
The rezun sum forks don't 20 tew
churcl, il bekaws suthin er nuther IL the
mattur with eech l. The Babtist hez tew
mulch wotter; the Methudist tew mulch
phire; the Yewnitariun tew mulch wind !;
the Episkopul tew mulch kreed; the
Koongregashunal not kreed enuff; the
Presbyterian tew mulch reprobashun !;
the Yewniversalist not reprobashun
enuff; the Shsikurs air tew noisy the
Qualkurs air few quiet; the Dunkurds
wash THAR pheet tew mulch; the Katho-
liks don't wash theirs enuff, so thair's no
church that jest suits theze foaxs, kept
the DEVILS, and hee IL bound tew git
them att last.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
COSMOPOLIS CITY.

You ask for story, have none to relate,
And so will sing you ditty.
And tho out of tune, it is not out OF date,
And relates to Cosmopolis City.
Our town is daisy, in some things not
beat,
The wheels OF industries are humming !;
Two new shingle mills that are nearly
complete
And several other things looming"
We have new mayor-he fills the place
right;
Our marshal is simply dandy.
lie will round up the tramps, if they come
day or night,
And will make himself useful and handy
Our councilmen, five, as sure as you're
alive,
Are men that will well fill the station
Charles McGafiey, l think, with Luke,
Coy and Link,
Will be faithful to their obligation.
But laugh like clown to see kids about
town
Walking out with young ladies so lofty,
While the gents stand and gaze, per-
picked and amazed
And go off by themselves signing softly.
To Judge by the past, ii this is to last,
We will have to consult the girls mother
To know without doubt and our fears put
to rout,
What relation they'll bear to each other.
No use to regret or sit down and fret,
GIANT heart never won fair LADY,;
But get up your sand and take bold
stand,
Then let the girls know you are ready.
With me you agree that then you will see
They will on the kids turn cold shoulder,
And tell them they may with their dear
mamma stay
Until they are several years older.
ROI
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
FROM CEDARVILLE.

John Sullivan started on trip down
the Chehalis last Saturday.
Samuel Williams, one of the pioneers
of this county is confined to his bed by a
severe attack OF rheumatism.
G. p. Nelson, who had his foot caught
in hay press, making amputation nee
essary, has recovered SO that he is able to
he around on clutches.
Alfred Haggerty, familiarity called
"Uncle Alf," who has lived an upright,
conscientious life on the prairie for forty
years, has received information that he has
fallen heir to many thousand dollars by
the death of brother in California. He
starts for California this week to perfect
his claim.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05

deputies and clerks, to take effect at once,
with a saving to the county Of about
$4,000 year.
The cutoff OH the Washington South
ern Railray, about four miles in length,
will be built at once.
The proposition to bond Everett for
$4,000 to buy water works was defeated
Saturday by $40 to 80.
In round numbers 100000 of King
county's taxes were paid prior to April /,
leaving $40, 900 to 60 delinquent.
f. &. Hazeltinc, Of the South Bend
Journal, returned Thursday last from an
extended trip to Peru and the isthmus Of
Panama.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
From Montesano Vidcttc:

From Montesano Vidcttc:
G. II. Campbell has closed his school
on the Wynooche and will spend the
summer on his north beach ranch.
Rumor has it that the state has decided
not to take any land in township 20,
range IL west. If 50, few good claims
can be had by the taking.
]. T. Medcalf received a painful injury
a couple of days since, when he accident
ally run nail in his foot.
EIw. Campbell, who has been in Cali
fornia the past winter returned to Mon
tesano, Monday, to look after his property
interests in this county. Times seem to
be as hard in California as here, and the
business depression fully as great.
We are informed that L. A. Tarr will be
a candidate for county auditor this fall.
Mr.. Tarr is the present very efficient dep
uty auditor, and understands the duties
OF the Office thoroughly. Besides this, he
is an A ! fellow, and will have strong
following.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
IN GENERAL.

Bismarck was 81 years old Sunday.
DR.. Brown-Sequard, of the elixir Of life
fame died in Paris Monday.
Fifteen thousand school children took
in the Midwinter Fair last Saturday.
The Land Securities Company limited)
of London has failed for two million
pounds sterling.
The Rev. Thomas Sturgeon has been
elected to succeed his father as pastor of
Surgeons tabernacle in London.
Governor Northen has appointed Pat
rick Walsh, editor Of the Augusta, Ga,
Chronicle, senator to succeed Colquit.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
FROM COSMOPOLIS.

FROM COSMOPOLIS.
|chooner Enterprise came in
and is loading lumber for San
very much panied to hear that
ker is so i'll that there are grave
|rtained that he will not recover.
|ork OF driving piling for the
b Of a bridge across the slough
pwn is being rapidly pushed to
IN.
Neil, one OF the boys employed
factory, met with quite a severe
Monday. He was engaged in
a belt, when he was caught by
" and received two wounds in
limbs below the knee. The
torn away to the bone.
number Of men have taken up
is vicinity, and are now remov-
Families and household goods
'paratory to active work in get
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
(Y. STATE and GENERAL.
COUNTY HAPPENINGS.
FROM OCOSTA.

FROM OCOsTA.
| Annie Patton, Of Tacoma, is in
llman is busy planking Myrtle
Easter visited Markham Tuesday
hess.
Rose Watson, of Markham, is
here sister.
|nchil is travelling up and down
ia Mondays.
Clay has returned home from
gton, d. G.
foundation for the pail and tub
IS completed.
bhingle mill at Markham has
hp on full time.
Redfeld was transacting business
esano Saturday.
Brown, OF Montssano, was seen
treets this week.
|nly money made in town these
by the fishermen.
a number from here attended the
&c at Westport Saturday night.
Sherwood is going to put in
bck of dry goods, boots, shoes, etc.
b. Nodine, Woodland and Rice
to Montesano on business Satur-
Fry, Of Olympia, preached at the
b New Light church Saturday
a number from Markham attend
Entertainment given by the Band
day night.
p. has taken up one \nits side
ind will relay it at Lewis Bros.
Markham.
ew mill is having quite a time
b run, breaking first one thing
another.
pdine has moved his hardware,
the building formerly occupied
Sherwood.
is some talk of starting up the
department. of the old mill nezt
i it don't take much to produce
)e days.
number Of Ocostains see where
He a mistake by not cultivating
oil last year, and they will there
en- on a large scale this year.
bal, gentleman from Chicago
e here to engage in the boot and
ness, after three weeks among
ted for his h ONE thoroughly dis
18th Ocosta.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
Bucklen's Arnic0 Salv0.

THE BEST SALvE in the world for Cuts,
Bruises, Sores, Ulcers, Salt Rheum, Tet-
ter, Chapped Hands, Chilblains, Corns,
and all Skin Eruptions, and positively
cures Piles, or no pay required. 1t is
guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction or
money refunded. Price 25 cents per box.
For sale by Evans & SHREDDER.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05

EFROM GARRARD CREEK.
in on Sunday stopped the grain
eley has taken a position on the
avs is receiving a visit from one
>thers.
are several people on the creek
from bad colds.
pging class was rather small this
ling to rain and bad colds.
n Neeley came home for a visit
evening, and returned to his
Ar. Mays on Sunday.
4itzman, of Porter Creek, vas
Mrs. +. D. Garrard last Saturday
bay. Miss Alice Garrard accom-.
Ter.
George Horton and A. Borden
Alice Snyder, of Oakville, at
he birthday party Of Will and
mmon. Several others OF that
pected to attend, but the rain
Gcarad them Out.
friday party Of Will and N. F..
was we'll attended, about sixty
>eing present. A good supper
Jed. The two large birthday
Fepaied by Miss Callie Balch,
bgh to make a fellow wish that
parties would come often. All
ID time and went away happy /;
several did look quite sleepy.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
From Elma Chronicle:

From Elma Chronicle:
The best way to improve dull times is
to cease croaking, and proceed to improve
them.
Judge Hines set out about one hum
dred two-y ear old prune trees on his
place west OF town last week. This, in
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05
NEWS OF THE STATE.

L. p. Ouellette, OF Olympia, has been
appointed state land cruiser.
The commissioners OF King county
have made cut in the salaries of all
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05

addition to the trees already on his place,
will make the judge quite a respectable
orchard.
Dan Thayer and Dexter Smith were
awarded the contract Tuesday to haul
1900 cords Of shingle bolts for Case HUI
ing & Coz shingle mill.
1t is reported, upon what is considered
good authority, that the W. d. Mack log
ging camp, just west of town, will be
operated this season by G. w. Clemens.
The operation OF this camp will have a
very beneficial effect on the business OF
Elma.
The Hughes saw mill at Summit mar
rowly escaped destruction by fire for the
second time last Saturday. A lumber
pile caught fire while the crew was at
dinner, and but for it's timely discovery
would very soon have been beyond con-
troll.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05

" AS old as
thehills and
never eXcell-
ed. " Tried
and proven
is the verdict
Of millions.
S i m m 0 II 5
Liver Regu-
lator is the
o mi y Liver
and Kidney
medicine to
which y o u
can pin your
faith for a
C u 7 c A
IN l ! q laXa-
tive, a n d
purely veg
etable, act
ing directly
on the Liver
a n d Kid
neys. Try it.
Sold by all
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05

From Elma Eagle.
Harry Dunlap sold about $50, 900 feet Of
logs on Grays Harbor last week.
Joe. Leybold was digging potatoes for
Jno. J.. Mcdonald east OF town this week
Just think OF this, We blizzard afflicted
and frozen farmers OF the east, digging
potatoes out OF the field the last OF March
and just as fine and fresh as they were in
October.
John l.. Combes took raft containing
ninetyone piles to Aberdeen this week
which he disposed Of to good advantage.
Rev. Joslyn, OF Aberdeen, delivered
most impressive and instructive lecture
to the Temperance League Monday even :
ing. His words were full OF earnestness,
and all who heard him are stronger in
the cause of temperance for having done
SO. .-..
The lumber and single shipments from
this station for the week ending to-day
were two cars OF lumber aud twenty-five
cars Of shingles.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05

From Ocosta Pioneer
Capt. Nick Parsons caught 75-pound
halibut in the harbor last Tuesday on his
sturgeon hook.
Numerous schools OF herring were dis
covered in the harbor this week and
large quantities have been caught by our
citizens.
CD. Murdoch had his knee very severe
ly cut week ago Wednesday with an axe
He severed one Of the large muscles of
the knee and will be laid up for some
time.
Aberdeen herald. [volume] (Aberdeen, Chehalis County, W.T.) 1886-1917, 1894-04-05

Eddytid by J. BILLINGS SAGE, suksesscr tew
Josh Billings, deseest.
Leevs from mi diurry air kalled sage leevs
bcckaws tina air good medysun fur the blewS.
The morning call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1878-1895, 1894-11-04

4 1!H|;9!&>hs'|s>fl>t
HI1|yT ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

on the day that they landed. And / VEN
ture the darkest day of Count Ito's LIE
was when he found himself wandering
through the slums of the CITY without
cent In his pocket. The way 1t happened
was this: The moment the vessel reached
the docks the officers aud crew departed
and left the two japanese boys TO take
care of themselves. They were dazed
with the din and the sights and the con-
fusion of the great city. 10 the csnter of
millions Of people they knew not which
way to turn, nor whittier 10 go. The cook
was gone and the locker was shut,
and there was not bit o. food TO
be had. They waited some time, expect
ing that the merchants might send for
them, but after awhile they grew so hum
cry that they decided to go ont and buy
something to eat They had SIS left, but
they did not know the value of money in
England. Tney thought, however, that
this would buy them some boiled rice and
a good meal of raw fish. Taking paper
/ with them Count Inouye marked on it a
/ diagram OF the route as they went in order
| that they might fird their way back TO the
! ship, and after devious wanderiugs they
/ came at last to a bakery. There were
/ loaves OF bread on the counter. and Ito,
/ who was carrying the money, not know
picked up loaf. He had no idea how
much it was worth, and he supposed that
the baker would givehi some'change. The
baker saw he was a foreigner and swept
: the whole of the IS into the till. The
The morning call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1878-1895, 1894-11-04

it! Telephones in the land of japan, |
called up his private secretary, and was
told that the Count had gotten my letter
and would receive me at 4 O'Clock sharp
that afternoon. In iiDrkisha, with two
men to haul me. / rode along the edge o
the moats which surround the palace
grounds, passed the new Parliament build
lngs and on up by the American legation
into what is now the most fashiona bic
part OF the japanese capital. 1t is made
up of modern buildings surrounded by
large yards, so walled in that they look
like the fashionable suburbs of a Euro
pean capital. Count Ito's house was a
large one of two stories. built of
brick. with great porte cochere running
out above the front door. a Japanese but
Ter In brass buttons and European clothes
received my card and showed me into a
parlor as large as the blue room of the
White House. 1t was furnished IN foreign
style and was, to my eyes, not half so
pretty as many of the pure Japanese
homes. | waited a moment when dark
faced. heavy man of perhaps fifty years
entered the room. He had a long body,
but rather short legs, and he was dressed
in frock coat of black and dark trousers.
while his shoes were evidently imported
from England. 1t was Count Ito. He is,
| Judge, about I'VE feet six inches high,
and lie weighs about 100 pounds. He is
we'll formed and muscular. His eyes are
a bright black. and notso almond in shape
as the average Japanese type. His FORE
head is high. bis nose rather thick. and
The morning call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1878-1895, 1894-11-04
HIS SPECIAL WIRE
How the President Gets
Election Returns.
NEWS AT THE WHITE HOUSE
The Telegraph Operator Can Reach
Every Precinct in the
Country.

WASHINGTON, Oct. 30.-Ou Tuesday
night next President Cleveland will re-
ceive at the executive mansion the returns
from The State elections. He will read in
brief bulletins the story Of the Democratic
party's victory or defeat in the Con-
gressional districts. Almost before the
result is known at tie headquarters of the
two parties-long before it has been made
publc-he will know whether he is to
write messages of congratulation or of
coincidence to the political friends for
whose success he is hoping.
The teIegraph-roOm at the White House
is the busiest place in Washington on
election night. There are the usual bull
letin boards on the streets with shifting
crowds watching the news as it is posted.
But in the Presidents house the little
group watching the returns as they come
in will be unchanging until the result OF
the election is known, at least the result
In the chief places where the Presidents
interest lies. And while the crowds else
where will rely on one source of informa-
ton for material out of which to coin en-
thusiasm every source of information will
be at the Immediate command of the
President and his friends.
Abraham Lincoln got the news of his re-
election at the War Department. In his
day the Governments only special wire
ran into the army headquarters. The de-
partment telegraph service and the wire
to the White House date from a compare
lively recent time. General Grant, when
he was President, bad a special wire run
The morning call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1878-1895, 1894-11-04

into the executive mansion and read the
election news in his office. But the estab'
lishment of a telegraph Office in the Presi-
dents house took place in the time of NJ r.
Hayes. Early in March, 1877, the first per-
maDent wire was run from the Western
Union telearaphic office to the executive
mansion. From that day to this, the De-
partment of Telegraph Information. as ii
might be called, has been a feature of the
Presidents Office.
The telegraph office Is not merely a
means of bringing within easy reach of
the President the news of elections or NOM
mating conventions. These could be had
very easily by means of temporary wire,
such as President Grant used. The value
Of the special wire at the White House is
in the means it affords the President OF
communicating rapidly with any part of
the United States in a case of great emer-
gency requiring his official attention while
he is in Washington. Or If he is in any
other part of the United States and desires
to be pnt in communication with his people
at the White House, he can talk with them
on a few minutes notes as freely as though
they were open to telephone communica-
ton. These facilities have proved their
great value Ia many emergencies.
The wire had hardly been put in the
White House before the great strike riot
of 1877 created a use for it; and during
the whole of that tempeStuous period.
when the life of the republic was threat
ensd. the President and his advisers at
Washington were in communication con-
stantiy with the Governors of States, with
the commanders of troops which had been
sent TO the assistance OF State authorities,
and with all other persons in authority
with whom it was necessary for the Presi-
dent to talk at long range. For a long
time during these strikes there was a
Cabinet meeting every day. and the bulle-
tins from Pittsburg and other cities where
there was danger were brought to the
Cabinet meeting. where the President
read them aloud to his advisers. The tele-
graph company gave these messages right
of way. In fact, in any great emergency
the President has a special wire to any
point which he wishes TO reach. All conn.,
mercial business gives way to that Of the
nation.
When President Garfield died at Elbe-
ron the Government took possession of the
telegraph wires. That is pot necessary
when the President of the United States
wants to attend TO any urgent business
for the Government. All that he has 10
do is to express wish to use the wires
and they are at his service TO the exclusion
OF business and personal messages. In the
same way railroad schedules seldom cause
the President any Inconvenience. When
President Garfield lay in the White House
dying the Pennsylvania Railroad kept
special trains ready. with steam up, al
Philadelphia and New York to bring &c
his aid on minutes notcs the celebrate
specialists who were called in consultation
from time to time by his physicians. One
night. when he was supposed TO be dying.
| . message went to DR.. Agnew In Philadel
The morning call. [volume] (San Francisco [Calif.]) 1878-1895, 1894-11-04
Y r>A< (. Ce4v>,ua~
A MONSTER PLOW.
II Was Made and Used in Kern County
Years Ago.
Copyright, 1894.

II Was Made and Used in Kern County
Years Ago.
Few people are aware of the fact that
what is very likely the largest single
share plow in the world was made 10 Cali
fornia and is at present on one of the
ranches of the Kern County Land Com
pany near Bakersfield. 1t is not in use,
however. but is simply kept as curiosity
in little yard all by itself.
1t Is over fifteen years siDca the idea of
the pillow was conceived by j. Thompson,
= ranch foreman. He was tired of pre-
pairing 3000-acre wheat fields for crops
with the ordinary or u inch plows.
worked by TWO horses, then in use. He
made his calculations very carefully but.
not being a mathematician, made a great
mistake.
He figured that IL two horses could pull
twelve-inch plow, six horses could pull
a thirty-six-inch one. and that eight horses
could pull a forty-eighi-inch one. 1t
seemed natural enough to figure tn at way.
when, in fact. he should have ecu bed the
capacity Of his twelve-inch plow every
time he doubled the width of it. A
twelve-nch plOw, when it is pulled a dis
lance equal to its width, displaces one
cubic foot of soil. and a thirty-six-iuch
plow will displace twenty-seven cubic
feet, instead of three, as Mr. Thompson
figured.
After all the calculations and drawings
were made a blacksmith came out from
Bakersfield, and In due time the monster
piow was ready to go to work in the field.
The share was made to cut a filty-inch
furrow and the top of it reached about
five feet from the ground. The beam was
over foot thick and the handles were
ten feet long. but, of course, did not slope
at the same angle as in the ordinary
plows. To enable the plow TO be turned
around easily it was suspended between
two eight-foot wheels, on the axle of
which was a seat for the driver. 1t made
huge. ugly continuance, that looked like
a nightmare.
When the plow was taken to the field
ten horses were fastened to it. The han
dies were raised and the horses started,
but as soon as the share was about half
way into the ground they stopped. More
horses were brought out and sunk it