davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04

What Would Bring Good Times.
~ large wholesale clothing house in
New York that usually carries 3d. OO,-
GOO stock is now disposing OF it's stock
at retail. The head of the firm when
asked the reason for this said: Il s",,r'@
IF I am to keep my two OF. three
million dollars worth Of goods for the
next eight months and at the end Of
that time aul to lose from forty to-
fifty per cent of their value through
the changes of the. tariff which this
administration contemplates, I think
it would be the better policy to get
rid of my stock now and at the best
prices ! can before the break comes,
and then SO out of business"
Here then, is the whole case in
nutshell, demogogues will claim the
tariff has nothing to do with the hard
times because we are still under
protection tariff; any school boy
knows. that the fear of change is
just as bad as the change itself as far
as the future production is concerned,
and that dealers and manufacturers
are shutting down and curtailing
business not on account of the tariff
as it is, but because of the change in
the near future as promised by the
democratic party. If Mr.. Cleveland
and his un-American administration
really desires the good and prosperity
of this country rather than that of
their adored England, let them assure
the people of America that no change
will be made in the tariff for three
years to come and good times will
come Of their own motion.-Western
New Yorker.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
Round Lake.
Mrs. Rufus Heath is on the SICK

Mrs. Rufus Heath is on the sick
list.
Mrs. J. Walker, who has been
quite sick, is able to be out again,
There was shooting match at
Round Lake New Years, also a
fght,-later. another fight.
Mr.. and Mrs. Trip are happy
in the possession of a fine baby
girl. All the family are doing
we'll.
Mrs O'Connor, of Sioux Valley,
passed through here Tuesday on
her way to Worthington where she
is receiving medical treatment.
Mr.. Henry Goldenhurst, of
Round Lake andMiss Dora Buttsha.
of Lake Park, recently united
in marriage. We think Henry has
been stealing march on us, never
theless we appreciate his choice.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
DewaId.

Miss Rushon is back to her
school.
J. D. Ely is helping w. D.
Boldly press hay.
Mr.. j. HI. Maxwell is drawing
hay to Worthington.
Will SEEKER is on the road for
Sutherland, the photographer:
The farm formerly owned by G..
B. Moore, now has an occupant.
G. r. Leonard takes car load
of hogs to Sioux City this week.
If you want some choice buck
wheat flour call on Mr.. Blume, of
this township.
Fred Hastings and wife, and
Mrs. Ely, spent New Years. day
in Worthington.
Some heartless wretch stole a
dressed goose from MI. Ely's place
New Years day. He is known
and may get his ''goose cooked"
A brace of young ladies were
seen breaking into the school
house New Years day. Well, that
is better business than stealing
geese.
A young man driving along with
a load of baled hay, had stuck on
one side of his load, one of Hum
iston's signs, which read: Equality
up, prices down. Quite sugges-
tive.
Monday evening Will Kasdorf
took a sleigh load of young people
to spend the evening with Mr.. and
Mrs. Chris. APPEL. They had
good time and a pleasant sleigh
ride.
CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
Not to Be Caught.

Mrs. Luneleigh (shopping with her
husband) oh, George, look here!
Doesn't this showcase of diamonds look
perfectly beautiful?
Mr.. Luneleigh-Yes, love. 1t. would
be shame to take anything away from
it, wouldn't it?-Chicago Record.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
Ono Sided Endowment,

One Sided Enjoyment.
Jack-While I was out hunting I ran
right into den of rattlesnakes.
George-Not much fun in that.
Jack-No, not for me; but the snakes
had rafting good time.-Good News.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
From the Boxes,

From the Boxes.
O'Kief-How did you enjoy yourself
at the opera the other evening?
McKell-I didn't hear much Of the
music, but learned the details of q few
society scandals which were highly in
teresting.-Brooklyn Eagle.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
Got There Fira

Got There First.
Goblet called at Miss Redbud's the
other night, and she asked to be excused.
Stone-Yes. saw YOU from her par
lor window.-Truth.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
Brewster Doings.
Rye, 80.
Oats, 81.
Wheat, 40.
Flax, s1.25.
Timothy, $l.45.
Wild hay, 1915.
Timothy hay, s5.75.
Barley, rs to 30.

Miss Augusta Berreau returned
from Heron Lake Monday.
The dance Monday was we'll at.
tended, and all report good time
About $50 bushels of Rye to fill
a car wanted by Hubbard &
Palmer.
Otto Berrean, the hay king, pay.
ed flying visit to Worthington
Tuesday.
Art. Meyer, Of Worthinton, was
spending New Years with friends
in Brewster.
Joseph Ebert was quite sick
Tuesday morning, but is 1mprov-
ing under the doctors care.
Mr.. and Mrs. Giessl returned
from Heron Lake Monday, where
they had been spending the holi-
days with friends.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
Political Information

Political Information.
"Papa, what is an oil inspector?'
IAN oil inspector, my son, is an official
who draws mighty little oil and mighty
big pay."- Chicago Tribune.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04

RAILWAY TIME TABLE.
East-No %; 1913 a. m. No. IA II :b5a. m.
No. "a 1l:l5. pm.
West-No. Yl 1888 p. M. No. 10 |: 90 p. m.
No. %, .: 20 a. IN. f. B. WooD, Agent.
Local D0ines.
Oats, 81
Corn, 81.
Wheat, 49.
Flax, $l.l5.
Potatoes, Is.
Barley, Is to ~.
Wild hay, $500 to $500
Timothy hay, 5000 to 6.25.
Geo. Smith has returned from
his wedding trip and is now located
in his new house.
A. Schaefer, wife and Ted, went
over to Adrian New Years, to take
dinner with E. H. Myths.
Joseph Rand and family, we're
over from Adrian attending the
funeral of their sisters child on
Friday.
James Wemple and Gertie
Schaefer returned from Sioux Falls
Tuesday, after a weeks visit with
relatives.
Martin Fagerness and John
Dahlberg, with ladies, went over to
attend the concert at .Worthington,
on New Years night.
Minnie Gregg aged eight years,
only daughter of Mrs. Emma Gre
60, died last Thursday of men,
branous Group, being sick only two
days. Our sympathies are indeed
with the little ones mother-this
being her only child and CON-
panion, making her now lonely
home a sad one indeed. ~ ..
Ajolly s]eighing party of Adrian
young people rode over to Rush
more hotel on New Years eve.
Seeing the old year out and the
new year in. Music, etc. until IL
o'clock, then fine time was had
until the small wee hours, the
return home with bells ringing
and merry voices singing made it
very pleasant for. all. Some ten
or twelve connie we're nresent.
The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1894-01-04
Rushmore News.

RAILWAY TIME TABLE.
East-No. %; l0:43 a. m. No. IA II :b5 a. m.
No. "a 1l:l5, p. m.
Wes.-No. Fl 1888 p. M. No. 10 I 90 p. m.
No. %, 9:2O a. IN. +. B. WOOD, Agent.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
the house.

This is the season of the year when the
loafer tells of how many cords of wood he
split in the winter. In the winter he tells
how many tons Of hay he raked in the
summer. -Atchison Globe.
This is not a woman's sphere" re-
marked the lady baseball player at short
stop as she got out of the way of redhot
liner, Brooklyn Life.
If it wasn't for his vaulting ambition,
the professional acrobat could never hope
to achieve much of Il success. Buffalo
Courier.
1t is true that times have been very hard
indeed. But it is difficult to perceive just
how the summer girl is going to econo-
mize in her bathing suit.-Washington
Star.
1t does not necessarily follow when a
man has his picture taken with guitar
that he can play.-Atchison Globe.
A lady having remarked in company
that she thought there should be a tax on
1.-THE single state, Eyes, madam" re
joined an obstinate bachelor, las on all
other luXuricS. Tit Bits.
The old sinner who sings Just as
Am" will get up and talk for half an hour
to make people believe he is somebody else.
Plain Dealer.
An AICnlSOl uOCJOT Nus iltlu up ny a
highwayman last night thinking to reap
a harvest. But before they parted the doc
tor had convinced the highwayman that
he needed vaccinating and had coaxed a
dollar out of him.-Atchison Globe.
Samson brought down the house. but
nobody called for an encore.-Texas Sift-
ings.
MY wife has persuaded me to go to
,I, mill hnr SUNDAY - th1Olpa
dreams, old man. Life
CARRIE don't care. Emily looks worse
than l do. Maud-Come, dear, don't be
unmerciful Boston Transcript.
DO you think my verse good" asked
a young poet of Douglas Jerrold. Good,
my dear boy!' was the enigmatic reply.
Good is not the word!''-YOuth's Com
panion.
Il just saw two Irishmen having diff
ference as to the respective shapes of their
heads" How did they settle it?'' "They
agreed to split the difference and were tax
en- to the hospital. HALO
The first time man ever plants Il flow
err garden you can't persuade him for
awhile that the florist hash t swindled him
by selling him the germ materials fora lot
of weeds-Somerville Journal
Dublin is dead city, " wrote an Irish
man many years ago. Nothing is stirring
in it but stagnation. youths Compan-
ion.
A Kensington woman who suffers from
kleptomania says she has taken about eY-
erything for Philadelphia Record
Every man should try to 1.-Two so that the
world will not be made very much better
by his getting out of it.-Galveston News.
Wife (tearfully)-You have broken the
promise you made me. Husband kissing
her)-Nover mind my dear. Don't cry.
I'll make you another.-Spare Moments.
1t is surprising how much we will take
from II rich uncle-if we can get it.-Syra-
cuse Courier.
A-Hello, Charliel Mustache cut off, l
see. What did you have that done fors
B.-Fifteen cents.-Harvard Lampoon.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
BRACE THE NERVES.

Sedatives and opiates won't do it, These ner-
vines do not make the nerves strong, and failing
tn do this, fall short of producing the essential
of their quietude-vigOr And while in extreme
such drugs may be advisable, their frequent use
is highly prejudicial to the delicate organism
upon which they uct, and in order to renew
their quietng effect increased and dangerous
doses eventually become necessary. Hostetters
Stomach BitterS is an efficient substitute for
such pernicious drugs. 1t quiets the nerves BY
braGing, tOning, strengthening them. The con-
nection btween weakness of the nervous syS
TEN and that of the organs of digestion is
strong and sympathetic link. The Bitters BY
impartng a healhful impulse to the digest We
and as Initiating functions promotes thrOugh-
nerves come in for a large share. Use the Bitters
in malaria, constipation, bilious and kidney
trouble.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
HIS GREAT LUCK
Was Once Poor, But Now Is Rich
slime Koures Invests His Last Co'
the Honduras National Lo,t..

Was Once Poor, But Now Is Rio,,
slime KOures Invests His Last .. oa-
the Honduras National Lotto.
Nothing venture, nothing gain i,
the motto Constine Koures odo veg
when he left Greece to settle in Amos r'0u
By sticking close to this resolution.I
is to-day $4,000 richer than he Voc y
week. The Honduras National rotta~
louisiana State Lottery is responsih,
for Mr.. Koures' sudden wealth '
there is quite an interesting story out @uu
nected with his good fortune. 'on-
Koures is from the nobility, ando v;,
to some difficulty at home he car, ing
America. Here he commenced life ~.
peddler and soon found himself in Clsnos
land, Ohio, without cent in his nocLoI
He remembered countryman in on;
cage, one of the firm of Manosus No
zarokos x Co., l4l South Water stree,
The only way to reach Chicago wac I"
walk, and this Koures did. One of tbo
firm gave him $5 to get something to aa'
and procure clean clothes. Konras
hesitated and instead of buying food IN
vested the So in five tickets in the Hon
duras National Lottery.
To-day he received by express $4,OM
one-ffth OF the second capital prize, OF Of
$4,000 in the drawing of June 70
Koures can speak but little English, but
he told a reporter for the Dispatch that
the "a, 600 would be invested in the frnit
business. He was highly elated over
his good fortune, and he said he thought
he now had the basis for large fortune
He declares that he will continue to buv
Honduras National Lottery tickets
Chicago Dispatch, July IG.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
TRiALs OF A TICKET MAN.
He Can Endure All bnt the Questions of
People Who Never Travel

He Can Endure All but the Questions OF
People who Never Travel.
A prominent Pittsburg passenger
agent. in n conversation with reporter
of that city, gave few interesting facts
relative TO the everyday experience OF
the average city passenger man, which
those not directly connected with the
business know nothing about. He said
at is a singular fact the number OF
people who visit our Office daily and the
curious questions they ask with regard
TO railroad rates, etc, when very often
they have no notion whatever Of leaving
the city and as a matter of fact have not
travelled any worth mentioning. For six
years there has been very singular char
acter who has made an annual visit to
this Office. | have no idea from whence
he cometh or whittier he goeth, but he
always asks the selfsame questions and
goes away apparently satisfied with the
information he has received. | always
expect him in the sprlngtime, generally
about the LIST Of April, when the suns
rays grow warmer.
Then my quaint old friend comes to
see me. | should judge him to be at
least 50 years of age. He is stopped and
feeble, with hair rs white as snow, but
well dressed, wears "A silk hat and carries
a cane and talks in a nervous, jerky
manner He invariably opens up with,
What's the rate to Boston, | tell him,
and his eyes light up as he waddles out
with always the same observation. We'll,
by gum, that's cheap! cheap! If cold
man would tell his story, it might have
a tinge of pity in it. Perhaps he has
son or daughterin the Hub City whom it
has been his cherished hope to see for all
these years.
THE biggest out and out nuisance we
have to deal with are persons who come
here with no other intention than to col.
lect all the railroad literature they can.
They have no notion of going away, but
thay grab everything i'll sight i'll the way
of time tables and other information
bearing on tourists points in the north,
east, south and west. They greedily
gather pamphlets, circulars and book
lets treating ON climate and resources.
l don't know what these collectors dc
with the stuff they get here, but some of
them must have a prize assortment
'Then the man who travels from one
end of the country to the other is the
person who invariably pushes into the
Office and in a brusk manner asks for
time table of the line he is about to
take. 1t is given him, of course, and
without so much as CHANGING at the
schedule it is stuffed into his pocket,
and his next question is, When does my
first train leaveY 1t never seems to oc-
cur to him to look on the time table. Sc
it goes. Sometimes people ask me ques.
tons until I'm afraid the buttons will
drop off my coat, but after all we man
age to get along with our patrons re-
markably we'll. "-Pittsburg Post.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
A ynst ConI snnp1x in Japan.

For agriculturists the japanese Island of
Yesso, though nearly the size of Ireland,
does not appear to offer much attraction,
but its coal mines seem likely TO prove of
more and more importance. Fifteen years
ago it was estimated by the American en-
gineers who made the first surveys for the
government that the workable coal beds
of Yesso contained 10000, 100000 tons, or
about two-thirds as much as the coal beds
of Great Britain. This startling estimate
has just been more than confirmed by OIL
cial government surveys.
OF the Yesso coal nine-tenths is found in
one district, that of the valley Of the Ishi-
kari river, near the west coast. The first
coal mined in the island. at lwanai, in the
province of Shiribeshi, belongs to the
smallest of the six coal fields, containing
barely ,000, 900 tons AS regards quality,
although it is very uneven and none OF 1t
stands in the front rank even of Japanese
coal, it is still declared by our consul to be
"all marketable. "-London News.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
A niblicaI Conmndrum.

A good story is told of the horsy son
of an English clergyman. He was on an
important occasion to meet the bishop of
Lincoln at dinner, and as it was desir-
able that a favorable impression should
be made ON mis- lordship his father beg
ged he wo3ld be favorable to the bishop
and do his best to draw him out, as he
was unusually strong in Biblical lore.
During the early part of the banquet
matters went on well enough, the young
man saying little, but watching for an
opportunity to open his full batteries.
At length pause in the general CONVEX.
sation took place, and while the com,
panytwas all attention he thus addressed
the bishop:
might venture to ask your lordshir
a question relative to point mentioned
in the Old Testament which has puzzled
me good deal2"
"Oh, certainly-quite happy" replied
the dignitary, feeling quite in his ele.
ment.
Then | should be glad to have your
lordships opinion as to how long it took
Nebuchadnezzar to get into condition
after he had been out to grassY'-Bostor
Herald.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24

The editor of The Popular Science
Monthly takes certain imaginative writ
ers to task for their unscientitic and alb
surd statements regarding 1.-The young
moon" and "the crescent moon" and adj
vises them to leave it alone, because they
SO often contrive to get it in the wrong
place. In story which has come under
his notice he finds two friends described
as sitting out one summer evening look
ing over the Thames, and the writer goes
on to say, by this time the young moon
had arisen, and its cold light shimmered
over the misty river" Such writers are
reminded that the young moon goes to
bed early and can never be seen in the
process of rising.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24

More money has already been paid
out in creating the Worlds fair than the
directors thought would be necessary to
complete it when congress voted to send
the exposition to Chicago. Ten million
dollars was thought to be the limit then
Auditor Ackermans report shows that
the expenditures to Dec. have been
Sl2 400, 236.6l The receipts have been
$I3, 229. 451. 9S. The available balance
on hand Dec. was $685., 069. 80, about
enough to last two weeks at the present
rate of expenditures, but the souvenir
coins arc coming. and the directors have
nearly 1000 900 yet in exposition bonds
from which no capital has been received.
Chicago Letter.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
A Malacca Boy Sketches the English.

A Portuguese boy in MalacCa public
school was told to write IL composition tell.
ing all he knew about the English. This
ed except in the one marvellous word 'do
cut" which means dogcart;
English is very proud and very white
They are mostly governors, schoolmasters,
policemen, magistrates, and a few are
lawyers and doctors and banks and many
other things. They never work, They
wear hats and boots and ride in docuts.
Some English goes to church, but only
once. They are clever tennis and ball
games and drinks much brandy and other
things Some are married. They eat a
much quantity of many things One OF
their great delights smoking cigars and
shooting and raining coming home in it.
English is clever at all things. My father
says Portuguese is black and ugly and
catch fish, but English is white and pretty
and eats fish what is caught. Father is
black and ugly, but making nets. English
is very fierce. If anybody does something
they swear dam. English women is few.
They ride and play the music and sing and
make faces. 1t is easy no work nor little
houses. l don't know any more English.
That is all know"
The small community of Englishmen in
Malacca looks upon the circulation of this
composition as very bad joke, but the
residents elsewhere say that it is so true
that if this Portuguese boy could only be
taught spelling he would prove second
Rudyard Kipling. Pail Mall Gazette.
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
THE NURSES DELIGHT.

Every experienced nurse knows the value
of a remedy which, without being an ano-
dyne will relieve soreness of the limbs OF
stiffness of the joints and enable patient
to sleep quietly and naturally.
Just such a remedy are ALLCocK's POP
GUS PLAsTERs. Placed on the chest or on
the back, if necessary cut into strips ana
placed over the muscles of the limbs, they
work marvels in the way of soothing and
guieting restlessness. Being perfectly SIM
pie and harmless in their composition, they
can be used freely, and many a sufferer has
thanked them for a night of quiet rest,
grateful both to him and those who care
for him.
BRANDRETH's PILLS do not weaken the
bowels.
Teach e'-Give me another proof that the
earth is round. Fitz-ROund-trip tickets
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24

Where are the wonders of electricity
going to cease? Have you noticed how
many ladies are having erysipelas just
now2 1t is the fashionable disease 1t is
different from the ordinary one mas
much that in about six weeks you are
"sweet sixteen" in appearance, to the as
constituent of all of your friends. Your
complexion is fair and your face round,
without a blemish and without a wrin-
kle. 1t is somewhat of a mystery to
your friends that you could have that
terribly swollen face, that peeling of the
skin and the extreme redness of the new
skin without any attending illness; but
it is true, and no one can doubt from the
appearance that it was anything but a
severe attack of that sometimes fatal dis
ease-erysipelas.
1t is rather mean to betray it, but it is
a fact that it is the effect Of electricity
and nothing else. and that the vanity Of
the human family is responsible for al
that designation, Inconvenience and sly
weeks seclusion. Chicago Tribune
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
omciairy Exempt.

Irate Citizen-I wnnt to make complaint
against IAN whose barn faces mino on
the alley between Ham street and Bono
avenue, near Lazarus court
Police Ofiicial--What is the troublef
He piles all kinds of rubbish out there.
We could keep clean alley il it WASH t
for him He mixes his ashes and garbage
and throws it half the time over against
my barn. I've talked to him about it timo
and again, and it doesn't do any good. F"
Whats his name"
"Higgson."
"HiggsonP Does he live on Ham street,"
"Yes."
I'm big brown housey"
Yes. That's the man. l want to enter
a complaint against him. want him
prosecuted. -
My friend, you'd better go back home.
Higgson's the health officer. Chicago
Tribune
Pullman herald. [volume] (Pullman, W.T. [Wash.]) 1888-1989, 1894-08-24
Sir Andrew Clnrk,s AphorIsms.

The late Sir Andrew Clark, Mr.. Glad
stones physician. made use Of the three
following aphorisms during a converse
ton with Miss Frances Willard: Labor
is the life of life Ease is the way to
disease" The highest life of an organ
lies in the fullest discharge Of its funC-
tons" There is d feast of food for re-
lection in these three sentences.