The comet. (Johnson City, Tenn.) 1884-1916, 1894-03-08

She'll pelt you with, an welt you with, before
The mildest name She gives you bein' Scamp
Scamp Scanp
We do not claim admission to the Patriarchan-
Bnt when they bar our entrance to bloomin
music ball
% tempora! moresD it is time to make
kick
Such un-American treatment makes me siekl
But when the guns are roarin' an the sabres
whir in air,
The enemy advancin' an the midnight sky
a-glare,
They quickly change the tune, an shout, as to
the rear they scoot
Lead on our Brave Defenders let EN- shoot!
Shoot shoot
When battles waves are shattered on a square
O. bonnie blue,
Hedged in by bristlin' bayouets a-drip with
bloody dew,
Oh, then we're valiant Heroes" an they
shake us by the paw
"Thermopyle amt in it, boys Hqrrah!
Rah, 'Rah
To doubt their patriotic boasts may seem a
But yet can't help thinkin', takin all into
account,
Their Hail Columbias, "Boys in Blue" an all
that other stuff
An love for poor Old Glorys simply Cuff!
Cuff! Cuff!
AM furthermore, 1ayit down as an estab-
lished fact,
Such treatment shows a woful want O. honesty
an tact,
An leaves us sadly to infer, with all the fuss
they make,
The Great American people is Fake!
Fake! Fake!
Stokes has read his classics and rc-
members them too, in spite of the one
slip IN the numerous illusions made in
the following; and army post Libraries
are not supplied with the reference
books one would need to verify even
the authorities named The editors OF
the Arp,y and Macy Journal caught the
slip and corrected the poet in foot
note. by reminding him that Tristram
Shandy" was written by Sterne, not
Drunken Dick" Steele. Anyway
Sterne's father, Roger, was soldier
and Laurence was intended and partly
educated for the army, so it's nearly al
right.
A FEW OF THEM.
at may be held as nearly automatic
that he who yields su ccessfully the
sword Of commander need no de
spair Of welding with grace nd.effec
tiveness the mightier weapon-th
pen. Army and Navy Journal.
Cedant arma toga, sang old virgil's epic muse
; But long before and since his time some me
| have learned to use
; Alike the stylus and the sword--the cuirass an
the gown
t And wreathed both pen and sabre with the ga
lands ofrenown,
There's soldier Xenophon, who tells his ten thor
0 sand men,
Till we can almost see the Grecian phalanx froi
again,
And hear his Asian vet rams greeting, DER ii
e waters flung
"Thalattal oh Thalatta.' in the brave old Att
f tongue.
And Cesar-god-like Cesar-whose vitoriol
eagles flew
e DER Syrian wastes and scythian woods al
Anglican pillows blue,
i But from the tented field of Mars its glory al
a Hath turned aside to WOO smile from gent
Clio eyes.
Kings, princes, popes and cardinals a
scribes of high degree,
Have quit the court and cloister for the warrior
10 panoply;
Aye saints and doctors of the Church have low
" the soldiers trade
= st. Augustine launched Christendom into NJ
ii Crusade.
d There's Jonsou-rare Ben Jonson! was a troop
true and leal
As ever quaffed cup of sack or jingled spur
heel
II And Scottish James. that squire of danes show
true poetic fire
e. Until on fatal Flodden Field lay broken lai
andlyre.
Ere Don Qnixote" saw the light, Cervantes s
ir the star
" That flames on Victory S brow along the rugg
front of war,
And Raleigh in old London Tower his dauntl
banner furled,
Penned all unaided and alone, the "History
the world"
Had Sailor smol EFT stayed at home, content
be dry land on.
This gruf old world had never sp it its 81,
is DER RoderiCk Random "
tie And dear, delightful, drunken Dick ne
~ dreamed of Uncle Toby
~ Had he been but plain Mr.. Steele not "Capt
at Richard, maybe.
And thou, 0 Bonaparte! "the MODEST Roman
Il them alp
To France, le petit caporal-to Britain, o
ghoul-who tore the map of Europe up; VIII
mighty mind alone
Der Anarchy S red ruins reared the Code Ma
leon.
ly Not Worth 81 900.
m New YORK, March "A dispatch
~ the Herald from Washington says:
G. counterfeit $1,000 7-30 United Sta
IL coupon bond of the series of July
TO 1865, was presented to the treasury
day for redemption. 1t was sent fir
al the State National bank, of Clevelal
Nv o., by its cashier, H. H. Somborn. Up
r. examination it was found that I
l ni original of this bond had been redeem