Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1894-05-27

ore eise's exg&nse than for somebody
else 70 "take 'tm on me-"
80
ladies from sil over The State write
70 me. | have legion Of feminine COR
respondents forever sending rio their
letters and consulting me on matters OF
domestic and general interest. Really l
cannot tell what makes them do II.
sometimes J think u IL my personal
beauty, which appeals most strongly 70
all. and then anlin ! conclude II must be
my charm OF manner. or the great wealth
fof feeD I am known 10 pcHAess This
mornings m III brought me communi-
cation asking Information as to the best
methods OF inaugsirating a crusade against
potato bugs, and only yesterday Mrs.
Melinda Augusta woighback, OF Tazc-
well. aneried me as to the surest means
OF removing warts from her Calls hind
leg. Young girls beg my opinion as 10
whether women can experience the emo
tons OF true love thirteen times IN a
lifetime or whether the sweet feeling.
Ike death, only comes once 70 each per-
son, In fact, the ladies consult me about
everything even down to the ingredients
OF their pies--and yet, would you believe
it'll don't get one letter out OF thou
sand that has the pages numbered syste-
faatically, or the writing arranged IN
the same manner. They'll start out by
scribbling lengthwisc on the sheet, and
then, In their huge handwriungs. they'n
switch off and go crosswise. or to add
insult TO injury. they conclude the epistie
with a postscript written perpendicularly
over the rest OF their efforts, which is
scratched down horizontally, Long tx-
peTience has taught me that ! can most
conveniently read such ietters-provided,
OF course they can be readily standing
on my head. often I skip some pages
altogether, and frequently 1t takes me
days 20 get through one communication.
for, cropping as | do In such labyrinths
OF manuscript without q numerical guide,
/ naturally peruse the same thing over
and over again. One woman out OF a
thousand numbers the pages OF her notes,
and one out OF million states whether
she Is a Miss" or Mrs" but II, in
addressing them, you happen TO make
married one single--then. Heaven pity
you. a mistake the Other way is not so
bad.
Last night as I challSed my cue and
prepared to make the most remarkable
Scratch" ever achieved in the annals Of
pool-playing, / overheard the chappieS
talking about ~. They couldn't smoke
their cigarettes for excitement and Chol-
", In - enthusiasm. even removed the
knob OF his walking-sticlS from the hole
in his face. In fact, they were all In
fiutter, and II was easy TO see that
long-awalted idea had struck them. /
generally feel out OF place myself where
ideas are prevalent, but l determined 20
listen and hear what was going ON. They
were talking about baseball. and pretty
soon learned that a proposed match gams
at some future date was the topic agi
tating them. Ii hasn't been arranged yet,
but nearly eveTybody--yes, even the ~
low who hates 10 sit down for fear OF
getting the creases cut of his trousers
Is in favor of 1t. The plan, dontcher
know, Is 10 have u contest between the
chappies of the Commonwealth and Able,
marie clubs, and 10 devote the proceeds
10 some charitable object When j heard
about the scheme / straightway suggest
ed that there was no more appropriate
object OF charity than myself, but they
hearkened not unto me. SO far as I could
judge the idea was To turn over the gate
receipts to that prince of modern Don
Quixotes, General CoXey, who has been
so much imposed upon because he failed
to remember the old proverb, which urges
US 10 keep Off the grass" The General
greatly endeared himself TO the clubbses
when he appeared at that dinner party
III a. AltSH suit hAil olHNt Alitil, hUtlntT
IL has been openly expressed or not, the
army has had the deep sympathy of all
the cane-suckers in the city. And now
the Franklin-street Commonwealers feel
that 1t is only meet and proper that they
should don their short-pants and do bat
tie with the Albcmarle Pippins OF Main
street The whole lot OF the Pippins to-
gether couldn't raise four good moustaches
and their little club hasn't been organ
lied long, but like the country cousin who
visits us II has come 20 stay. If the con-
test comes off, il will be a gilt-edgod
epoch in the history OF Richmond so
ciety. and whether Coxey gets the money
or 1t liz appropriated to some less de-
serving cause, the girls will enjoy the
fun immensely.
They tell "a cute little story about VIII
lie O'Ferrall, the Governors youngest
son, who is q jolly chap of g. Willie de-
MES the yarn most vigorously. but II
sounds nightly like It might have been