Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-02-22
SAM HOUSTON'S SMILE.
1t Came Just IN Time to Save HIS Life
and Make a Good Story.

Washington POSt.-A good story wRS
told in one of the committee rooms d,
the capitol the other day. touching the
senatorial career in Washington OF
! Hon. Sam Houston of Texas. 1t was
some time in the '40s, not Tong after
! Houston had come to the senate. The
| great Texan was attended by a faith
full black from Virginia bearing the dis
tinguished name of Richard Henry
Lee. Richard proved himself a good
body servant in all things save one
He attended faithfully on every want
of his eccentric master, who was keep
ing bachelors quarters; but no argu'
ment was sufficiently persuasive to in
| duce Richard Henry Lee to keep the
! rooms in order. A general air OF sloth.
full neglect marked the surroundings
of their domestic establishment, and
time AMI again Houston threatened to
! have Richard Hayed and his black hide
hung over the backyard fence as a
frfghtful example to evildoers. Things
ran on in this way until one day Hous.
ton returned to his rooms from the sen.
ate and found the condition OF affairs
at home So bad that he determined
! then and there to teach his hunky a
good lesson. He deliberately locked
the door. and without saying a word,
| crossed over to a table where he kept
his pistol-case. removed two pistols
loaded them, handed one to Richard,
and took the other himself.
"Now. Richard Henry Lee" he began
in a low voice that forebOded ill, "yoU
stand in that corner while T take my
position In this, opposite. face to face,
nan TO man, pistols in hand. You
have betrayed my confidence and
tramp1ed upon my feelings until pa
thence has ceased to be a virtue. !
have reasoned and pleaded with you
to maintain my rooms in that state of
cleanliness to which, a. a free-born
Texan, L am accustomed, and you have
basefy ignored my wishes In the prem
Uses, and have gone on in your sloth-
full, shiftless way without regard either
to my feelings or my comfort. Now,
you Internal scamp, I have made up
my mind to Kill you. [ could do so with
out giving you a show for your life.
but absolute fairsess shall distinguish
the method of your taking off. Get in
to your place and when I drop this red
bdndana handkerchief shoot If you
kill me. so be it. I forgive you now.
If I kill you it won't make any differ
ence, anyhow. You are good for no
thing, and your removal will be a bless
ing to society. Remember. however.
that no man ever faced me with a pis-
toll in his hand and lived to tell it."
With ashen face Richard Henry, who
despite his negligence. loved his mas
ter most ~devotedly. took his stand in
the corner assigned him and mechanic
ally followed Houston's motions. The
Texan took a handkerchief out Of his
pocket. which he held aloft as a signal,
and then raised his pistol with the
other hand to the level with his lack
ey's heart.
AS he did so an involuntary smile
fitted across his face. instantly Rich
ard dropped his pistol, while his face
spread into a huge smile.
II say. Mars SAM" he shouted in a
transport of rejoicing. 81 really thought
yo' meant it, but yo' just pokin' fun at
me-. Goramity.' he added. with a sigh
of relief. lit makes me shiver to think
how near you was to death. Dat smile
was all dat saved yo' life"
Houston told the story as a good joke
on himself, assuring his hearers that
he was positive Richard would have
killed him if he had carried the joke
a hairs breadth further.