Barton County democrat. [volume] (Great Bend, Kan.) 1885-1915, 1894-08-09
THE FUCKERS DUMB WEEK.
How a Family with a Bad Fault
Set About to Correct It.

were conscious OF 1t, and therefore,
like sensible family, set about cor
-recting it. This fault was-they all
liked to talk. Consequently they often
talked all at once, very loud and very
fast.
Maria Jane inaugurated the reform.
''Boys, this thing must STOP" she said.
1--WE are getting to be a noisy, disor-
.derly family and for one am ashamed
of it. This breakfast table, until the
.griddie cakes came on, has been YER
liable bedlam."
What are you going to do about it?"
asked Stephen and Frank together,
while Charley, high school middler
who had just passed his Harvard
''prelims,' whistled:
"Hark. hear a voice.
Way up the mountain top"
1t should be remarked here that
Maria's height was at once source of
tribulation to herself and of infinite
amusement to the three boys Seven
lyear-old Blanche said simply: more
igriddles," and Little Mother" Tucker
smiled approvingly on her eldest
daughter, and said demurely, that
shed welcome any change for the
better;" while Rev. Mr.. Tucker re-
marked, with severe dignity: II am
J.
rion of the true condition of affairs,
and 1 hope it will lead to speedy
amendment"
Hear! hearP' shouted Charley. THE
motion before the house is"
''That the conversational proclivities
of the Tucker family be suppressed"
supplied Stephen.
81 second the notion said Little
Mother.
''Mr. Speaker" said Maria, bowling
low to Charley. who was reaching to-
ward the last Rriddlecake, my plan
for improvement is simply this: That
we all agree for one whole week not
to speak"
Fired Struthers comes Saturday
nights" interrupted Frank.
Ito each other here at home," con-
tinued Maria with color, ''but to COM
municate with each other by writing,
sign language. pantomime or any other
means that we can devise"
Good workr' Whose idea is the
brightest?" and Three cheers for
Maria! Rah! rah! rah" came stimuli
taneous from the three boys, while
Blanche inquired, anxiously: Cant /
talk to my dolls and kitty?"
''As much as they do to you," said
her mother, kissing her.
'.Fatherl never consent to anything
like that" declared Stephen, in stage
whisper.
mo, indeed, chorused the other two
boys.
''And yet it wouldn't be any fun
without him." said Little Mother.
The minister retreated behind his
paper. Maria began to urge him. ''Oh,
ioiv 70 ha he
coaxingly. 1--WE don't think you e.
peciaHy need it (groans from the boys(;
but we want the influence of your
name and example upon the younger
members of the society" (Sniffs from
the other end of the table,.
Father, what objection have your
''Won't you, papa?"
''Well, if he doesn't we sha'n't have
to-" No sound from behind the paper.
Some papas speak when they
spoken to-" remarked Blanche, senten-
tiously.
''Or promise not to-" said Stephen.
''Father" WHAT 'Whyr' "Oh,
myr calculated the astounded family
the next moment
For Rev. Mr.. Tucker had slowly
risen, placed his paper against the
wall and was writing in blue pencil
the words:
II hereby promise to abstain from speech
with my family for the space of one week.
signed, EBENEZER TUCKER
BRAY" began Frank, but Charley's
hand was clapped over his mouth.
Then followed a grand stampede in
the direction of pencils and paper, in
the course of which Stephen looked
into the nursery and saw Blanche Ia
boriously printing with chalk on her
blackb board:
IT AM NOT TO SPEEK AMY 1 FOR
WEEK. BLA-'
Whereat he took her upon his shoulder
and carried her to the door of the sit
ting room.
She found Charley and Frank with
Webster's Unabridged dictionary
opened at the deaf and dumb alpha bet.
The book was old, and that leaf was
soon discovered to be loose. 1t also
became inconvenient for two heads to
bend over the page, inasmuch as two
pairs of hands must be repeatedly
brought into juxtaposition with the
printed models. So boyish ingenuity
evolved a compromise, effected by
tearing the page in two. This gave
Frank the one-hand, and Charley the
woodland alphabet As a result, each
mastered his own in a comparatively
snort time, but neither would change
ms system. Blanche could not Learn
either method without verbal explain
alton; out peace was finally secured
by her pointing at the hall clock-ar
act which sent both the boys in the di
rection of books, hats and the school
house. Blanche watched them out o.
sight, laughing at the vigorous nod.
and shakes by means of which the,
discussed the probability of a tardy
mark, and then ran into the kitchen il
search of diversion.
Meanwhile Little Mother and Mari;
had been making plans for the day
These were on one sheet of paper. ana
read: