The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1894-07-24
A CLOSE RESEMBLANCE.
oand 1t Led to IIorsewhippine and an
Angry Wife.


Say, now, lemme tell Won something
said the drummer who'd been looking in
his pocket dictionary for the last 10 minutes
Tor the word respiratory" over which
there was dispute.
Everybody was willing he should tell iii
he knew. and he closed the book and con.
tinued:
1t was simply coincidence. In Other
words, resemble Chicago man so closely
thal the young woman made Il mistake"
And precipitatcd herself and welcomed
you home, of course" growled the old man
with the Queen Anne chin.
Not that evening, old man. She was
young woman who WAS looking to precipi.
tate a row, and may add that shewa sue.
cessful DON'T all speak Mt once, but I'm
the unknown man who got horsewhipped
on State street, Chicago, in July, 1892. 1t
may have slipped your memory, but |
haven't forgotten any of the particulars
yet"
"Horsewhipped by n young woman. ebyn
querled the metallic paint agent rs he nut
on knowing look.
Say, now lemme tell you how it was.
1t was one on me, of course, but it all came
about through my being so stylish and good
looking, you know. Cashier of "A bank mnIe
love to a beautiful girl and won her heart
Her father failed in biz, and the cashier
threw her over. Her love turned to hate.
and she yearned for revenge. She heard he
was SHINING up to another girl, and she de-
termined to take him down peg or two
The evening l arrived in Chicago was the
date She had set for the little affair. nut
up ut tho fremont and after supper took
walk"
rms henrtbroken, reyengeful girl en-
pecteu TO 1ind the recrcant cashier with n
lady, of COURSE" cackled the paint man.
OF course, and l was with lady-my
wife, you know. Yes, my wife used to
travel with me then. We were taking n
little stroll, and the street was pretty clear
or pedestrians when IL young woman over
took us. l hadn't caught sight of her vet
when she out with n rawhide and began to
dust my jacket 1 don't deny that it was n
real surprise party. was once picked up
by Texas steer, but the surprise wasn't
equal to this OCCASION"
did she say anything?" asked the man
with the Queen Anne chin.
Say, now, lcmmc tell you that she did.
She had an exclamation for every cut She
called me 'hcartless villain, n pertidious
wretch ana n dozen other things which
didn't hit my character and conduct, and
that rawhide kept after me like II swarm of
bumblcbees chasing farmers hired man.
got one lick on the neck which lasted over
month. Oh, She meant business she didv'
And the lady with your
The lady with mel Say, now, lemme
tell you that my wife ran into a hallway
and yelled, Murder" and that's what
brought the police to my rescue. was
that surprised couldn't even holler. Just
about the time II cop grabbed the girl she
discovered that she had made great mis-
take, and she felt so cut up about it that |
really pitied her. OF course l had to ac-
cept her apologies and say it was all right.
but couldn't keep my feet still while do
ing it."
And of course your wife accepted her
apologies qucried the glue factory drum
mer who had been holding his breath.
say, now, femme tell you that she
didn't" replied the victim. THAT'S where
such mistakes do power O. harm. 1t was
all perfectly proper and rs straight as "A
string, and yet my wife wouldn't speak 10
me for month and is holding the 'coinci-
dence' over my head yet"
DO we understand" said the paint man
after two minutes of silence, edo we under
stand that the mistaken young woman also
apologized to your wife?"
Say, now, femme tell you something"
petulantly exclaimed the coincidence chap
as he got up to leave the smoker.
"All right, 80 aho;-l.
1T has just occurred to me that she didn't
apologize, but I'm not going to raise any
row about it, and if you fellcrs think YOUR
selves so awfully smart just go ahead and
swap lies and get OIL stale jokes and pat
each other on the back for Smart Alecks.
Say, now, lcmme tell you I've got through
and the whole gang Of you can go to grass
and nibble for fodder. "-Detroit Free Press.