The Penn's Grove record., 1894-02-23
PITH AND POINT.

Binx calls his doctor his bio3raphei
for the reason that he is at work upon
his life.
You never can judge q man from his
appearance in a wedding smt.-Hartford
Journal.
Samson was the first man on record to
br,ug down the house. Union County
Standard.
Out in Chicago they refer to the new
Columbian coins as their ''better halves"
Statesmen.
The man who aspires to make a sue
cessful pickpocket should study free
hand drawing.
Whenever there is any doubt about a
dogs sanity an ounce of lead is worth a
pound of cure.-Mercury.
Men most liberal in their views give
away their opinions freely before they are
asked.-Detroit Free Press.
George-"Why do you frown upo1
my suita" Maisie-s'Bscause it's ready
made."-New York Telegram.
Ignorance isn't bliss by any means
when the schoolmaster is getting out the
Old ratran.-Somerville Journal.
A carpenter is known by his caips,
but a barber is known By, his shingles
and shavings.-Mail and Express.
Oae frontier industry has been RUNE
ia Idaho. Horses in that new State ar,
too cheap to steal.-Colora u Sul.
A photographer is one of the most in.
dependent o. med; he never hesitates to
present his views.-Lowell Courier.
Psrlaps- they're called crossings be-
cause their condition is enough to mlks
people cross.-2hiladelpaia Record.
Every time n man gets abused By
other men it strengthens his memory for
names and faces. -Atchison Globe.
An upright ju 1ge needn't. be asaanel
of his sentences even in the presence OF
the strictest grammarisns.-Troy Press.
Few Do:"I wish my income was like
the Golden Rule, Slimkins." "Yesa
Why3" "Then I couldn't live up 20 it,"
When o man inksrits a portion of ,
eoodly estate he has no trouble in lin l.
ing people ready to stake his part
Gazette.
,rnere are said to be fifty thousand
muscles in an elephants trunk. 1t must
have been packed by a woman. Ten.
nessee Twinklings.
1t is fortunate for woman that she aa'
a better aim in life than the ole SIC
takes when throwing a stone at a srlsn.o
hen.-New York Telegram.
Ethel-"rhey say the Rev. D.. B'sAos
renearses all his sermons beforeAtni."
Clara--"That is quito right; he prIctlc's
what he breaches 1.-The Club.
'sThat will do for the present." as ia,
yonug man remarked as he paid for u
box Of cheap candy for his s~weethearSss
birthday gift.--ohiladelphia Record.
lie (proudiy-"My love has no enl."
Sac (snickly-"Hasn't ita Well, you
want 10 make a limit mighty quick. Lat
it end with me and go no further
Vogue.
Wife-"Doctor, my husband is sub
iecs to fits. What shall I do7" PLysi.
c an-"Tell him, madam, to order his
clothes in London. "-Clothier and Fur
nisher.
81 knows why bees never sit down.
| said Walter. "Why, my desrf' asked
his mother. "'Causs they has pins in
their coat tails and they's afraid to-
Mercury.
For .'really elegant" English, it
would be difficult to surpass the fol.
lowing from the pen Of a report,t Of the
Providence Journal. Sat the Z Sc a
the speech the company emphasized the r
appreciation OF tho sentiments by resor,
to manual and pedal agitation. New
York Post.
az heard Snappington blowing up that
hare. Drained son of his again." said the
woman who lives next door. eyes,"
replied the husband, sit's strange how
much easier 1t is to keep up the supply
Of feud and fool than It Is Of food and
fuel. "--Washlngton Har.