Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1894-08-10
A LARGE AND JUICY FOOL.
Ia: He Knows Deal More About Guines
Pigs Than He Did.

~ have just come in from the country
said the young man with the fall styic
derby, "and succeeded in making large
and juicy fool of myself almost every day
while l was there. l staid with an uncle
Of mine who has a farm III os IL miles from
| nowhere, and the Reubens got the laugh on
me SO many times that can't remembe
the number.
1.-THE queerest experience that / had,
though, was at one OF their county fairs
They held the fair early this year, for some
reason or other, and was on hand to take
1t in. / went out to the grounds with a
party of young women who were visiting
in the neighborhood, and undismayed by
the failure of my former efforts to string
the rustics / started out to have fun with
them as soon as we struck the grounds
We walked around for couple of hours,
and ! was poking all manner Of fun at the
people we met. Finally we came to the
shed where the poultry was on exhibition,
and as we went along looking at the vari-
ously bred chickens, got particularly fun
ny. AT the end of one of the rows of coops
was box with five or six guinea pigs in it.
There were quite number of countrymen
standing around looking at the queer little
animals.
1--WE walked over and looked at tn,
pigs. Then | said loudly, DO you know
that il you pick up a guinea pig by the
tail its eyes will drop outP The country.
men stared Fact l continued. Pick
one of them up by the tail, and its eyes will
drop right out. Most queerly constructed
anat omically Of any animal known to nat
uralsts. If these pigs were mine, would
soon show you
L. l.
side the box said, Stranger, don't believe
you ! insisted that was right, but he
stood and doggedly shook his head, and the
rest Of the countrymen sided with him.
Now, guinea pig has no tail, and there is
where the joke comes in. l argued for
some little time and then made a grand
bluff. Ipulled out a little roll of bills snd
offered to bet the Reuben S25 that fast
that thing would happen. Imagine my
surprise when the Reuben hauled greas:
old pocketbook out OF his jeans and COW
cred the money. was sure had him, for
the bet was u catch one anyhow, and as the
young women who were with me were egg
ing me on l couldn't think RI flunking,
Understand / said, j claim that il
you pick up that guinea pis by its tail its
eyes will drop out
1 understand said the countryman, as
he opened little door in the side of the
box and pulled out a guinea pig. Now
pick this one up and let's see its eyes drop
out
Then began to laugh. 'Ha, my friends
/ said, 1 have played little trick on you;
that's all. AS guinea pig has no tail you
can't pick one up by it. If you could, l do
not doubt that its eyes would drop out
II reached out for my half Of the bet,
when the big countryman said: 'Hol on
there, mister. You jist look an see If this
here guinea pig hain't got TAIL exam
ined it, and may be switched If it didn't
have a tail an inch long. The countryman
picked it up by the little caudal appendage,
and OF course its eyes didn't drop out.
Then he reached over, grabbed the wad OF
money and put it in his pocket, remarking
the while, Il didn't think when developed
that breed Of guineas that they would ever
make that much for me-
"Pll be blamed If he hadn't been work |
ing for three years to produce guinea pigs
with tails He had succeeded, and was
chump enough to 90 up against the only |
cage Of that kind Of animals in the world |
with my chestnut about their eyes dropping
out. buffalo Press.