West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1894-09-13
Would Not Trade Brooches With
Grover or Bonnets With
Queen Victoria.
Decorated With the Yellow Ribbon
In 1892 to Distinguish the
Yellow Streak in His
Spinal Column.
The King is q Powerful" Adj
mirer of the High Sheriff
OF Preston.
King Edmund Messenger {!


There are times in the history Of
all men, when taken at the flood
tide, lead on to fortune and glory,
is quotation which | am not GER
tain that | have quoted correctly
However, 1T is immaterial, for 1t
expresses the position of the man
who has been elevated to opulence
and fame. No one will be more
surprised than | was when the AR
GUS detailed me to eco and inter
view King Edmund L. and ascer-
tain how the Nation and Tribe are
getting along" was puzzled. Was
the ARGUS playing one of ITS prac-
teal jokes on me? Walking into
the sancCum l SAID "Wfll you
kindly tell me where / can End
King Edmund l.? | can find no
such parsonage in the Preston
County History"
"Ed Messenger" was the laconio
reply.
Starting me out on wild goose
chase" | murmured as | left the
sanctum. had not gone far when
| met my loyal and true friend,
Sheriff Shaw, who has always treat
ed me royalty at the county's ex-
pense. Can you direct me where
| can find King Edmund I.?' |
asked.
ole was in town early this morn
ing, but he has gone back to the
Nation WAS the Sherilf's answer.
/ FASTENED my steps and soon
reached the Nation. Everything
was solemnity and attention. King
Edmund |. was delivering an ora
ton to the Tribe. | stopped to
listen. "You must reverence and
worship me more than ever" was
the first words to lodge in my ears.
81 am tenfold greater than Grover
or Queen Vic. have just returned
from trip TO the barbarian where
they fell over each other in paying
homage to your King. There was
an election IN progress and they
elected me President over the pres
ent incumbent, James l.. Mckenzie.
the "Got Left" But | told them
| could not serve them; that my
people would make war on them
and exterminate them if | left
them"
When he finished his Grafton he
was carried IN his triumphal chair
to the mansion amid great cheering
and waving Of banners. / had some
difficulty IN procuring an audience
with the King. 1t was not until /
had bribed several of the guards
and attendants that reached the
presence of His Majesty. He rec.
ognlzcd me at once, but did not
greet me with that cordIality and
respect which is due an American
citizen from all classes OF royalty.
Decorated in his knightly robes he
was porched upon the throne when
] saluted him and said, "IIello, old
lob.lots, you must have drawn a
royal bobtail flush to land you on
top Of that old wash tub" which
came very near costing me my life,
for several Of the Tribe made grab
for me. But the King commanded
them 90 desist and motioned for me
to climb mp and tako seat along
by the side Of him, which / pro
ceeded TO do. When | was seated
/ asked, "What in The name Of Gu
riosity arc you doing here in the
Nation? How came you TO be
crowned King OF the Nation +?
"Tou are not acquainted with tho
royal blood that flows in my veins, 4"
said the King. 81 am descen-
dant Of the House Of Republican.
the House Of Greenback, the House
Of Democracy, aud was decorated
tho Prince Of Floppcrs in 1892,
with the usual yellow ribbon tied TO
my left leg to indicate that that
there was a yellow streak o. politics
IN my spinal column. Upon the