davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20

had ever been young. He appeared to
be so years old when people first began
to call him Miser Jones, and the passage
of time did not appear to affect him.
He was wrinkled and skinny and white
haired, and men said he would have
been dim of sight but for the greed of
gain which burned in his eyes till they
shone like VOLTS.
Miser Jones had relatives, but for
fear they might want money he cut
loose from them. He owned several
houses, but that he might not take from
the rent he lived in miserable room
and Jared little better than dog He
had money to lend, and he exacted usu-
rH There were no days of grace for one
in his debt. Prompt payment must be
made, and to the last penny, and nei.
| ther words nor tears would move him.
No charity, no church, no beggar, ever
extracted one cent from Miser Jones.
He cared nothing for the trials and mis-
fortunes of others, and he was never af-
fected by what men said of him except
when some one observed that he could
not take his money beyond the grave.
That idea alone upset him and detract-
ed from his happiness. He spent hours
in wondering if it could not be done,
and sometimes he was on the point of
asking lawyer to $50 arrange matters
that his money should at least be buried
with him.
The New Year dawned bleak and cold
and dreary. There was high wind.
and the air was full of whirling snow,
and even had it not been a holiday few
people would have moved away from
their firesides unless forced to.
''It is good day for me-a fine
day!" chuckled Miser Jones as he look
ed out ON the deserted streets and up at
the leaden sky. "No one will disturb
me today, and I may sit down and
count up my wealth. I am richer than
a year ago today, much richer, but I
want to know the figures to a shifting
to penny. They call me Miser Jones,
but can laugh at their sarcasm and
abuse. Now we will figure. "
Miser Jones had bonds and mortgages
and notes and bank account. He knew
the sum total within a dollar, but it
was keen delight for him to sit down
and cast up interest again and add it to
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
HOW HE PROPOSED.
Had Things All Arranged, but Had to Ac
cept a Compromise.

Fad Things All Arranged, but Had to Ac-
cept Compromise.
John Duross is a young and enterpris-
ing commission man of Pittsburg No
one ever accuse him of being eccentric
until recently. John is a popular fellow
with the gentler sex, but until a few
weeks ago had withstood all their blan-
dishments. Finally, however, he ac-
knowledged himself whipped and pro-
posed. This is the way he did it.
He bought house and lot one morn
ing, and in the afternoon took the fu-
ture Mrs. Duross for drive.
''I've concluded We'll get married, :"
he said as the smokestacks Of the smok-
lest city on earth grew faint and far
away.
"Well," responded the young lady,
with a gasp, II presume you will &C.
cord me the privilege of something to
say about such an important matter, es-
pecially since I have been selected for
the victim," and she began to frown
and pout.
"You must and shall say Yes. Now,
listen. I've got the cage, and we will
go down town together tomorrow and
get the roosts and tubs and things that
belong to cages"
"Why, Mr.. Duross! Really, you as
tound me with your assurance. Please
take me home"
Instead, John whipped up and drove
farther away from the stacks.
"After we get the mansion fixed uE
will go and get license, We'll get
spliced, and as have to go to Florida
next week for a trainload Of oranges
you can call it your wedding trip"
The poor girl was paralyzed, but
managed to protest.
"No use, Meliss, I have planned it al
out, and it will be that way"
"But, Jack, have no clothes fol
such an occasion, and besides I've got
some goodbys to say. shall want al
least six months for preliminaries"
"Clothes be hangedl" exclaimed Jacl
as he urged his horse to travel faster
81 have only four suits of clothes, ant
you have a dozen dresses-at least Tn
sure you have for Jack didn't know
whether she had two gowns or twc
dozen. He simply made guess.
And SO, after great deal of arguing
compromise Oh four weeks time wa
effected.
That evening Duross related the Cir
cumstances to boon companion ant
wound up by saying:
"I'll tell you what it is, Bill, womel
ARE the most perverse creatures in tn
world. To think of that girl wanting
six months time for such blowout
Why, a week was long enough, and
don't understand why Meliss shoul
kick for more time. But Iwon the day
Still had to postpone my Florida TRIP
and I'll bet SO cuspidor that orange
will be out Of sight when I get there
But Meliss is worth a thousand train
loads of fruit, and expect we had bel
Ger have another cold bottle. ''-Chicag
Mail
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20

mqufring gaze at the same wInuow, --puJ
could see nothing.
II saw a queer looking man go into
that house a few minutes ago" he NUT
tered as if talking to himself "He start
ed up the stairs and then came back and
shut the door, as if he was afraid somebody
was watching him. wonder what he's
Up to-"
Momcntarily the crowd on the sidewalk
grew larger, but the stranger Kept his eyes
fixed ON that window and continued tC
mutter to himsa.i.
Presently u wild locking man appeared
at that window. He raised it, thrust his
head out and glanced l.l lively up and
down the street Then, as II becoming
suddenly aware Of tho prasehe" nt the
crowd on the sidewalk, Eow num ing
100 or more, he drew back and closo, =
window, but raised it again almost ilMme-
diately and leaned out.
"What do you want?" he said delantly,
pushing his hat back on his head.
What are you there fors" demanded
the stranger on the sidewalk.
"What am l here for?" he rejoined
fercely. Il don't know that it's any Of
your business. Do you own these prem
ises?"
mo"
II thought not II I choose to come
into a vacant building and take a look
through it, with a view possibly of occu-
pying it, don't see why the whole town
should gather round as If was an escap-
ed lunatic or giraffe at large. But since
you are here, gentlemen" he continued,
opening up a small valise and taking out
something wrapped up in paper, "allow
mo to call your attention to a little article
| Of my own preparation which l call the
Lightning Toilet Soap and Dirt Remover,
and which l warrant equally good for
shaving, cleaning grease spots from cloth
ing or for use in the bathroom, warrant
ed not to injure the most delicate skin,
but on the contrary especially suitable for
infants, and l sell it by the cake for 5
cents, half dime, one nickel, the twen-
tieth part of a dollar, and if one of you
will mount this box on the walk below
me and reach upo hat or any other article
of clothing with grease spot on it will
take pleasure in showing you, how quick
ly-what's your hurry, gentlemen9"
Silently but swiftly the crowd melted
away until only the original stranger
remained.
The man at the window closed it, came
down stairs and out of the building and
joined him.
II told you it wouldn t work, Higgins, y
he said, with deep disgust as they walked
away. Chicago Tribune.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20

the room. The voice had come from one
seated on the opposite side of the table,
but be looked and rubbed his eyes and
Aaw only vacancy.
"Sit down, Miser Jones. Sit down
while we talk together bit" cnntin-
ued the voice as the windows ratified in
the storm and a skurry of snow blew
into the room under the door and reach
cd almost to the old mans feet.
he looked all about him in a dazed
and wondering way and sat down.
''The old year has ended, the new
begun, Miser Jones. Human life is
counted by days and weeks and months
and years On the tombstones of the
dead you may read that they who sleep
beneath lived so many years, months
and days. 1t is meant that each and ev-
cry man should sit down at the begin
ming of new year and write the record
of the old. You are an old man. You
have lived beyond the time allotted to
man. Your hand shakes as your fingers
guide the pencil. You have been max
ing figures. Let me take the pencil and
help you.
'sBut l want no helpp protested the
old man. You have no right herel
You were not asked to come! Leave me,
or will call for helpp'
''You are figuring ON dollars and
cents" said the voice. "There is long
column of figures, and will look them
over with you and help you to find the
sum total. You have first recorded the
sum Of $500. That is money you loan
ed to hardworking mechanic and took
mortgage on his home. Misfortune
had come to him and still pursues him.
You hoped that more trouble would
come to him, and it has. You figured
from the first that you would get pos
session of his home for half its value,
and yesterday, when he came to you
with trembling lips and pleaded misfor-
tune, your heart was like stone. Today
you are figuring on your profit "
"But he came to me to borrow and was
willing to pay the interest'' protested
Miser Jones.
Here is the sum of $780," contin-
ued the voice. "You lent widow $500
on mortgage and foreclosed it and
drove her out of her home. You figure
that you made $3.50 ON that deal. She
came to you and wept and prayed, but
you rubbed yoar wrinkled hands in sat-
isfaction.
lone must have profit when he
lends money" replied Miser Jones as
he looked at the figures with satisfac-
tion
"Here is the sum of 5000. You loan
ed money to the owner of a small facto-
ry to help start him again after he had
been crippled by fire, but what the
flames left you soon took possession of.
Yes, you made clean 5000 on that
transaction. I find the sum of 5000 and
$275 and $500, long column of fig,
ures here to show the profits of the yea1
just ended and add toyour fortune. Mi
ser Jones, you are arich man."
eyes, yes-a rich man! I like to heal
you say l am richP'
"But You are an old man. You can
not hope to live great while longer.
''But shall live for years and years.
I am not SO old as you think. Don't
talk to me Ct death.
'You are an old man, and your time
has almost come" continued the voice.
"You have laid up treasure on earth.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
ADVERTISING RATES.
OLD HIcKoRYs WAYS.
Two Characteristic Stories of Jackson's
Rtuntness When He Was President.


General Armstrong, assistant COM
missioner of Indian affairs, thinks that
Andrew Jackson was one of the greatest
men this country ever produced and
has number of stories which were told
him by his uncle, who was an intimate
friend of Old Hickory. One Of them is
very characteristic Of the man.
Lewis Cass, secretary Of war, was
over at the White House one day with
some important papers for the president
to sign, among them being a court mar
tial findings.
"Cass, what is this?" inquired jack
son as he was about to write his name
to the document.
''It is a court martial" answered
Cass.
"What have l to do with it?" asked
the president.
''It dismisses an officer from the serv-
ice, and the president must sign such or
ders."
jackson toyed with the paper and
said musingly: ''Dismisses him from
the army, eh! Why!
drunkenness; getting drunk and
falling down on parade or something Of
that kind" answered the secretary.
"Who ordered the court?" asked Jack
son.
General Scott, answered Cass.
"Who is it?" inquired the president,
with more interest.
Inspector General Kraun," replied
Cass.
"WhaGl" shouted jackson. "My old
friend Kraun! Cass, just read what
that paper says. :"
The secretary read the usual form of
the coarE martial sentence in such cases.
The president then took the paper and
wrote across the bottom where he was
about to sign his name:
''The within findings are disapprov-
ed, and Colonel Kraun is restored to
his duty and rank. y
He passed the paper back to Secreta-
ry Cass and said, with his usual vehe-
mence:
''By the Eternal, Cass, when you and
Scott serve your country as well as that
man has you can get drunk on duty ev.
cry day"
A young man from Tennessee, son Of
friend of General Jackson's, came te
Washington for place. He looked
about and found what he wanted. II
was in the war department and filled
by very efficient Whig whom Secre'
tary Cass would not remove. The young
man told jackson the situation, ant
Ca1s was sent for.
''Cass," said the president, ''thi:
young man, son of my old friend, says
you have got place in the war depart
ment filed by Wing which you won
give him."
Secretary Cass explained that thu
duties of the Office were of a peculiar
kintL and he could get no one to fill th'
place if the man now in it should be re
moved. jackson f1ared up.
"By the Eternal, Cass, do you mea1
to tell me you have an Office in your de
partment filed by a Wing which can
be filed by Democrat? Then abolisl
the office!'
The young man got his place. Wash
ington Post.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
JOHN BULLS HUMOR.
It Is o. the Fat Witted Kind; That Is What
Americans Think.

It Is o. the Fat Witted Kind; That Is What
Americans Think.
Hawthorne, observing Englishmen in
England, speaks of them as heavy
witted' Emerson alludes TO their ''sav-
ing stupidity" Howells has introduced
to us some typical specimens Of English
responsibility and rank batfied in their
chase after American humor, but on the
scent and arriving at the point of ap-
probation after considerable silent
thought, sometimes lasting into the next
day, and here is the testimony of Low
ell, from his recently published Let
ters. " In letter written in 1889 from
England to Professor Norton he thus ex-
plains the warm reception given to Buff
falo Bill by London society:
But / think the true key to this
eagerness for lions, even of the poodle
sort, is the dullness of the average
English mind. never come back here
without being struck with it. Henry
James said it always stupetied him at
first when he came back from the con-
tinent. What it Graves beyond every
thing is a sensation, anything that will
serve as q Worcestershire sauce to its
sluggish palate. We of finer and more
touchy fiber get our sensations cheaper
and do not til,d Wordsworth S emotion
over commoa flower so very wonder
full
People are dull enough on our side
Of the ocean stream also God wot, but
here, unless l know my people, never
dare to let my mind gambol Most. Of
them, if I ever do look on like the ia
nous deaf man at the dancers, wonder
ing to what music am capering. They
call us superficial. Let us thank God,
dear Charles, that our nerves are nearer
the surface, not SO deeply imbedded in
fat or muscle that wit must take pitch.
fork to u.s. Outlook.
He said he thrilled with patriot zeal for
his beloved nation. The grand old glorious
commonweal thrilled him with admira-
tion. He loved his land with love divine,
such love as patriots cherish. His life for
it he would lesign yield up his breath
and perish.
He loved with fervor unconfned its
laws and constitution, and all his heart
strings were intwined around them in
'profusion. But then his wrath couldn't
| be appeased, his oaths were loud 90, hear,
because his taxes were increased some 13
cents year.-New York World.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
A FRIEND.

Oh, who does not esteem a friend,
Above all other things attend,
To speak to us when we are sad,
To rejoice with US when we ere gladf
To mingle with our friends ON earth,
In joy or sorrow, woe or mirthp
l. is the meaning true Of life,
We live within this world of strife.
But some people do not care to lend
And know no blessings of u friend,
But pass away the time TILL lol
Their days are done and they must go.
To him whoe'er mishap attend
And lives this life without friend,
OF all the mishaps we recall,
'Twere better not to have been born ct all
-Homespun in Burlington Hnwkeye.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
NO GO.

How Two Gentlemen Were Foiled In an
Attempt to Earn Their Bread.
Yesterday afternoon stranger stopped
on the sidewalk opposite vacant build
ing on the West Side and stared intently
at one of the upper windows. Several
loungers, moved by idle curiosity, grad
uallx gathered about him and directed an
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
A MISER'S NEW YEAR.
BY NJ. QUAD.

Copyright, 1894, by American Press Associa-
toni
"Miser Jones"-that was what ev-
erybody called him, and the title did
not displease him. Indeed it rather fat
tered him. To be miser meant the
possession of money, and money was his
god. There were people who could re-
member him as young man and a
spendthrift, but they were very few.
To look at him one would wonder if he
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
WITH A PRovIso.
I am resolved IN ninety-hvs

am resolved IN ninety-fvs
To swear OF cigarettes,
And on the track, as I have done,
I'll make no racing bets.
With poker chips III play no more.
I've had enough of that.
IN take no girl 70 see the play
Who wears too large a hat.
shall not look upon the wine
When it is deeply red,
But quite persistently I'll take
My Adams ale instead.
In ninety-five / am resolved
To save a goodly sum,
And when 1t comes to good hard work
I'm going to make things hum.
But these resolves for ninety-tive
Are made conditionally,
And that is that the girl love
Does not go back on me.
Tom MASON.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20

the principal. With greedy look and
trembling fingers he brought out his
memoranda and pencil and soon forgot
the storm and the outside world.
$50 you are figuring again, Miser
JoI es, closing the account of the old
year and opening with the new?''
The old man leaped from his chair
with shout of surprise. No one had
knocked at the door, He was alone III
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20

"Aha'' he muttered triumphantly.
"Ahal'
He looked yet again.
"Ahal"
Gathering his bathrobe more closely
about him, Lii Hung Chang retreated at
the rate of six miles an hour, while the
emperor, with his two carpetbags and a
shawl strap, was left far in the rear.-De-
troit Tribune.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
NEW YEAR THOUGHTS
WHAT THE DAY HAS BEEN AND Is
NOW.

The Superstitions and the Calling Prac-
tice-why the Custom of Making Calls
Has Abated-A Day of Freshness and
Recovered Hope.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20
New York.

DR.. Prices Cream Baking Powder
Worlds Fair Highest Medal and Diploma.
Democratic Northwest and Henry County news. [volume] (Napoleon, O. [Ohio]) 1894-1905, 1894-12-20

Subscribe for the NoRTHwEsT-$1.0 90.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-05-31
ARorT BEGGTNG LETTERS.

There is in truth far too much beg
ging going on among charitable" peo-
pie The following instance occurred
in the working of a society renowned
for its opposition to mendicancy in
every shape and form:
A young girl had been apprentced Il
a business, and for two years required
maintenance and careful supervision
There were two ladies actively inter
ested in this good work. One was vis
iting the girl, the other arranging tn
financial part of the business. 1t
happened, however, that the visito
was asked at a moments notice tt
write to a gentleman for assistance
who had expressed a Willingness tc
help any case OF this knid. A report
was sent, very brief and to the point1
for the visitor was not versed in the
arts of charitable appeal" A reply
came by return of post with a check
for the sum required. But the donor
said he was confused between the let
ter he now answered and another he
had just received from the other lady.
This lady was a mistress of the art;
| it was said that for any deserving OBJ
ject she could obtain f40 within three
days, so potent was her pen. Yet she
Z
binary dealings Of life as you could
meet with. Such, however, is the fatal
| influence which begging exerts upon its
votaries that in explaining. the case of
! this girl who had worthless father,
she asked for help on the ground that
/ it would assist a poor orphan to es-
! tablish herself in the world" No won
( der the man appealed to was puzzled.
I for the lady who first wrote to him had
distinctly mentioned the existence Of
! this parent. When the lady of too
4 lively an imagination was taxed with
her inaccuracy, she coolly replied: 1T
was unlucky that he should hear two
1 different accounts. You ought to have
asked me what you were to say. The
word orphan, think, always has a
good effect. and as this father of hers
i cannot perform a fathers part. why.
really, we may call her an orphan
after llr'-Macmillan's Magazine.
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-05-31
a NEW COLLECTING CRAZE.

People get curious fads. met a
man from Maine who had travelled all
over the world. He had. not made a
collection of spoons, stamps, auto
graphs, photographs, nor any of the
things that are usually collected by
travellers. He had depressed from the
beaten paths and started a new fad
which seems as sensible as at least the
postage stamp craze. He has a collec-
ton of buttons, hundreds of them Of
all sorts. shapes and designs. Buttons
from police, fremen, constabulary and
sOldieTy of all countries. cities and
towns, as well as buttons from the
clothes of famous men, Each button
has a history and a long one, too, as
told by the Yankee, so [ did not wait
TO hear much about them. But he had
taken the button, surely. 1t may not
be long until the button cranks may
become prevalent and the great men Of
the land will not be bothered any mora
by requests for autographs. but it wilH
be: will you kindly send me a button
from one of your suits?'' The prospect
of the statesmen of these great United
States having to resort to hooks and
eyes in self-defense, after having been
deprived Of all their buttons to appease
the demands of this coming army of
cranks, may cause some little joy in
the hearts of those who have been
YEARLY watching triumphant tom
foolery in Congress. The predicaments
which this new craze might cause are.
endless. We might imagine an over
obliging celebrity being forced to keep
to his room by thoughtlessly gratifying
those who iattered his vanity by the
asking. No matter how the craze may
affect the victims. it is sure to boom
the button MISUNDERSTANDING Des-
match
The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1894-05-31


Palermo, Sicily, May 3O.-The court
martial before which Deputy Giuseppe
de Felice and a number Of minor chiefs
of the Easel di Lavoratori have been
tried, pronounced the sentences today.
Deputy Felice was sentenced to eigh-
teen years solitary confinement and to
three years police supervision.
Bosco, Barbarto and Verro were
sentenced to twelve years solitary con-
finement; Montal to ten years and Pine
to five years.
All were also deprived of their rights
to take part in public functions.
The sentence of the others ranged
from one to three years. Three were
acquitted.
The trial commenced early in April,
before a military tribunal. Deputy fe-
lice was the chief of the Fasci oil Law
orator., and he denied in detail each of
the charges against him, saying ms
meeting at Marseille with Cipriani. the
socialist exile, had nothing to do with
any plot to cause a revolution in Sicily
or elsewhere.
Pico, on the other hand, testified that
Felice only awaited the arrival OF
quantities of dynamite, which had been
purchased in London, to cause a
wholesale outbreak in Sicily.
The police testified that the society
had organized and caused the disorders
which had occurred in Sicily and as
serted that the leaders of the con-
spiracy had received money from
France, England and other countries.