The herald., 1894-04-25
HUNTING A BURGLAR.
TIE EXCITING EXPERIENCE OF A
GRAND RAPIDS MAN.

1T is dreadful to be suddenly awak-
sned at night by a large, coarse burglar
without any innate refinement, said tho
Union street resident, land when my
wife awoke me Thursday night, and in
one of those whispers women invariably
use after the lights are out, and which
always cause a man 3 backbone to crawl
up behind his ears. told me she was sure
there was a burglar in the house, l re-
member requesting her to so down and
refer him to tho Charity Organization
society. because was sure to get the
grip If left my warm bed and went
parading around the house without stop
ping to put on anything but defiant
expression.
Ibid she goi"
"Sho did not, although explained to
her that if she would merely step down
stairs and speak to tho burglar in con-
ciliatory way he would probably go
away quietly, and there would be no
trouble. l told her that if should sud-
denly come face to face in my own house
with crude, uncouth robbor who had
not been invited there, and who had no
letters of introduction, my fiery temper
would probably get the better of me,
and there would be an awful hand to
hand struggle, which would like enough
inspire in me such fiendish longing
for warm, red blood that would thrash
around for weeks afterward killing re-
spectacle people on sight. l have al
ways striven for n higher mission in
life than to go around shooting large,
ragged holes through the vitals of my
fellow men, and for that reason i ex-
planned to my wife how even burglar
might have loved ones dependent upon
him for support, and that life was prob
ably lust as dear to him as it is to a
member of congress.
"But you can talk any sense into a
woman's head after she has become
imbued with tho idea that there are
burglars in the house, and at length,
rather than have any trouble over the
matter, arose, and grasping revolver
and lighting my boys dark lantern
started out to find tina, burglar and ex-
plain to him that he must have been mis-
led by the number ON the door and got
into the wrong house. l did not go
down on gallop, because preferred
to give the housebreaker chance to
realize his danger and escape with his
life while there was yet time. 1t seemed
harsh and unfeeling to coldly shoot a
man to death when l did not even know
what ward he voted in, and SO l slam
med things around and created consid
erable disturbance ON the way down
stairs.
II looked under the door mat and
turned my seurchlight on the hatrack
without finding burglar and was just
on the point of returning up stairs to
consult with my wife as to whether she
cared to have the parlor carpet mussed
up with his blood if l should find him
robed III a Iortt u1srnfi ,gcaft rsIrR feum
the landing and dash mp stairs. My
first impulse was to let the burglar stay
up there if he cared to. because l could
have got along on the ground floor
we'll enough the remainder of the night,
and | do not want to seem inhospltable
to any one, but realized that it was my
duty to protect my family, and / took
after him. Well, sir, had no idea there
was so much fun in nerrily romping
around the house with burglar after
business hours. We made the first cir
cult of my family residence within 10
seconds, and though could not focus
the dark lantern quickly enough to get
good look at the housebreaker l could
tell by his hoarse labored breathing and
the way in which he reached out and
covered space that he was a good deal
annoyed by the turn affairs had taken.
81 had never seen burglar act that
way before, and it did good deal to-
ward restoring confidence. 1t seemed to
me that burglar who had no more
sang froid and nerve than that had bet
ter 20 home and take in plain sewing
rather than try to eke out a precarious
existence in the midnight marauding
line. and tho reflection served to put so
much boyish zeal and enthusiasm into
my mad pursuit that tho hem of the only
garment with one exception that | was
wearing at tho time began to fray out.
On tho third lap we plunged heavily
over the baby's crib in the nursery, and
my wife covered up her head in the bed
clothes and screamed, and the dog took
after both of us, and there was trouble
all around.
ION tho next round the burglar gained
a trife on me, and when he reached the
kitchen he unbolted tho back door and
dashed out into tho night, with a pierc'
ing wall, and | after him. We tore
around the house twice and then down
the sidewalk to the next house, where
the burglar made break for the barr
in the rear. found him covering II
one corner of a box stall, with hand!
upraised, and as 1 stood over him with
levcled revolver the rays of my trusty
dark lantern revealed hired girl, wear
ing a wild, hunted look and dun col
ored robe de mutt made of outing fan
nell
THAT was all. Silently and witt
bowed, uncovered heads the girl and
walked back home, where the family
awaited us, and after she had explained
in fatigued way that, hearing th'
racket l had kicked up, she had starteC
, down stairs, and seeing me prowlint
around the front hall had mistaken m'
for a burglar, we went to bed again
and my wife felt greatly relieved. Tn
,, next morning when | went down tow
| saw my next door neighbor looking
curlously at the irregular splotches il
his driveway, where the hired girl