Rock Island Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1893-1920, 1894-06-23
HIS NOTIONS CHANGED.
Why He Di,in't Agrce With His Friend on
the Subject of Vacations.

W ny ne DtAh't ARTco Win HIS ff1cO0 on
the Subject of Vacations.
A little bunch of well known business
men were gathered by chance in front of
tho Lindell hotel. They stood there for
some time discussing politics and enjoy
ing the sunshine. Finally, as they were
about to separate, one of the group no
ticed that the overcoat pocket of his WIS.,
avis was crammed with railway maps,
steamers guides and time tables.
Il say, Charlie" he said, "why are you
collecting all that rubbish? Planning a
vacation
Eyes" he answered. Same old thing
every year. Go somewhere-go some
where. l think sometimes I'd rather
take my family out here on the Maramec,
live in a tent and fish. But no, it's fash
ionable to hurry away on long and te-
dious journeys, stop at stuffy hotels,
rush through n maze of nonsense and
then rush home dead tired, weary, half
sick and altogether footsore. The very
contemplation of it tires me-"
why don't you stop it Them said
the Questioner.
''Rather q difficult thing to do, l
should judge-when your family plans
the campaign"
do as l did. 1t just took me three
years to accomplish it, and now live in
peace. On our first summer vacation,
which was by rail, 1 devoted my spare
time to reading aloud the statistics, and
descriptions of horrible accidents on rail-
roads. At the hotel brushed up on all
the hotel conflagrations since watering
places We're invented and mentioned
them in detail upon all possible occa-
sions. 1t was most exasperating and
uncomfortable experience for all con-
cerned, l can tell you, but it worked.
Next summer, when the vacation bust
ness came up, merely asked if we were
going over the same route as before and
was met with most unanimous and
emphatic chorus of noes. They were
afraid of railroads and hotels, and so
they compromised on a long trip by
steamboat up and down the river. be-
cause it would he entirely safe.
Il prepared myself again, and when
the boat moved out l had in my state
room couple of books which portrayed
in the most heartrending manner the
final blowing up of almost every steam
boat that ever ran the river. These |
dragged out and read with much JUNCTION
and deep pathos. In the holy calm of
the summer evenings, in the glorious
hush of the sunlit mornings. read 'em
aloud until we We're all afraid we would
never get home alive. Well, sir, it was
awful! The horrors Of those days and
nights are with us yet. Next summer
suggested the beauties of q river trip,
but nobody seconded the motion. and |
soon learned that we were TO spend a
few months at small inland resort not
many miles distant from st. Louis.
This was an unexpected flank move
ment, but / loaded up with statistics,
and on cloudy evenings / would lie in
the hammock of the resort and tell nv
family how cyclones are formed and
show them how they rush up the valley
and sweep resorts from the face of the
earth. Twas compelled to manufacture
q few facts in order to prove that cy-
clones had q special fondness for sum
mer boarders, but the scheme worked
like a charm. We came home a mon l
in advance and have never gone any,
where since. Say. old man. you don't
know how / enjoy life now with a weel,
or two in the woods with my fishing and
hunting club. It's great scheme"
And the ugly man laughed harsh,
discordant, exasperating laugh.
Nobody said anything for some time.
The group was thinking.
Yes, stree. It's great scheme re-
sumed the ugly man. Don't you think
so, Eohn:"
NO, 1 don't" said John, land I'll tell
you why. used to have your notions
of good time, and in consequence the
summer outings of myself and family
We're anything but pleasant. But the
little woman is lying out yonder in Belle
fontaine now, and when these beauti-
full days come along feel as though l
would give the universe for one more
chance to do something for the comfort
and pleasure of one who deserved SO
much and got so little. That's why"
And John and Charlie and the ugly
man turned away without another word.
st. Louis Republic.