The Cambria freeman. [volume] (Ebensburg, Pa.) 1867-1938, 1894-09-21
HAD ENOUGH OF SUBSTITUTES.
Homemade BootbIackIng and the Emhsr-
rns-L.l.nt ~ G.n-.-a !. IT,. =. nn-.-

Homemade BootbIackinS and the Emhsr-
rn~sInent At Caused Texas FTonoT-
Some gentlemen were. discussing cur
rent topics in the lobby of the II
George the other evening when houfcn-
weiss the new prohibition substitute
Tor beer was drawn into the discussion
says the Baltimore News. some had
tried the new drink and pronounced II
equal in point of flavor to thu. grr,uiDa
article and various opinions yv.r,. OK
changed relative to the right of persons
t. sell it in local option communities
Il am not competent to venture an
opinion upon that phase OF the gue~-
ton" said one OF the party. but a. a
rule the man who monkeys with sub
stltuteS usually comes To grief in one
way or another. At any rate that Il
my experience. and ! viii give You "a
ease in point In the early DAYS of
Texas. when few of the modern con
vcniences that we now enjoy were. oh
talnahlc. ! was living in the country.
working ON a farm \ man named
Brown lived near my fathers. Well.
one day ! learned that a couple of
Young ladies were visiting MIR. Brpwn
and family OF course. now | would
have To 20 over and see the Young
ladies had a tolcrable good suit IF
clothes. but my shoes were consider
ably worn, and never having come. in
contact with blacl1iugr. very naturally
were tough and unpleasant Il tn,
sight 80 l set about trying To- hit rlp-
on schemes whereby / could improve
the complexion Of my shoes. Finally
an idea struck me and / smiled tri-
umphantly a. l congratulated myself
on my shrewdncsS- ! would take, some
SCOT from the chimney. use molaSS.-S sS
a vehicle. - the druggists say. and
polish up my shoes with the cumaaunl
The SCOT would certainly mall,. th..
shoes black enough ana the mola~s.-S
would hold IT ON. Capital idea There
fore got 10 work and soon had my
sub>titut, ready and applied To the
shoes.
The effect was not t. say artistic.
bat II made the shoes black. and that
WAS the end | sought Il achieve. 4
short walk soon brought m. t. ol1r
neighhor'S. where the girls were visit
ing and ON my arrival l was invited
int" the room which d.d service a. "a
parlnr- The young Indies and 1 had
exchanged a few compliments relative
1" the weather when l uncun~ciau~lv
shifted my foot ON the floor. Then mv
heart sank within me and I cursed tins.
day that my inventive talent rot the,
upper hand uf me and / mpnkrl,.f
with substitutes. for when I moved INV
foot a swarm Il flies filled r1.. room
and r"ared Ike bees They haI l,cen
after the molaSS,S on my shoes. and
the shifting uf my foot had uut 1hrrn
I" flight. ! felt that my face was rrr-
ting unbccnmin-ly red and my Ter-v,.
heraH la fail me. hut I made. "a heroic.
effort L. renew the conversation and
stand my ground but II was useless.
could see that the girls were all hut
dying I" laugh. and rccnfbrc.rnent- IF
flies were constantly appearing upan
the scene They roared arla buzz,i
and fought each other for first nirr,.
ON my SHOES Directly | heard Mrs.
Brown from the other room say. john
ME ! think l hear th, bees ~yyaruliglr~.
Go ont and see about them That was
too much and. gathering up NV hat. /
hadc the Young ladies a hurried rood
day and departed. envclopcd in "a halo
of flies a. big aS balloon ~ 4 pla~..E
the gate behind me / heard Johnnie
shout Nav. the bees amt a swarm
in; they're after that Young f,llcr
what just left here Hes been stealth
honey and they're after him abour IL
Nush they'd sting thc triflin- rascal T.
death. l do No. gentlemen no sub
Stitutc> for me. please. The hare men
tion Of them makes my hair phil