davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-09-20
TO AN OPTIAfIST.

| feel, Amanda, much surprise
That you have yet escaped disaster.
Although you openly despiSe
The teachings of each sap, ent master:
You do not take mournful theme
And always talk in accents fearful.
Nay. far from this. you often seem.
Audacious maid, distinctly cheerful
Upon each book. # only 2raced
With striking plot and situation.
You look with possibly misplaced
But quite unstinted admiration;
You do not share as yet. I know.
Our modern critics sad conviction.
Who write long articles to show
The swift decline of modern fiction.
You do not cultivate a cause
Much advertised in largest letters.
Nor seek for popular applause
BY talking of your Sex's "fetters:'
They charm you not: those fierce de-
lights
So dear to all our lady fighters:
You care, l think. for Women's Rights
As little as for women writers.
Although it seems extremely bold.
You say without the least misgiving.
That, spite of what the sages hold.
Existence still is worth the living:
Nor will you readily obey
Those mOurnful philosophic wishes
Which urge mankind. without DELAY,
To turn themselves to food for fishes.
No doubt such antiquated views
Deserve our most sincere compassion.
Since obstinately you refuse
To heed the latest mental fashion.
And errors grave aud sinister
In such opinions I'd discover.
Were l some wise philosopher.
Not merely-your devoted lover!
Anthony G. Deane in Temple Bar.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-09-20

That shame shall never come. I
swear l will prove your innocence
even before it is called in question.
Elaine, believe me, there is no reason
for this fear"
Folded closely in his arms. the slight
frail figure leaning against his broad
form, the weary head pillowed on his
breast, the assurance bore with it even
more weight than it deserved. He
was so strong, so eager to save her.
she could not but believe in his ulti-
mate success.
1T is goodbye for three whole days
perhaps. Elaine how I shall miss
your
And I your she whispered. fondly.
I never knew what love was till now"
Not when you loved Gerald
Weare?"
That was fancy-a girls romance
nothing more. The love I feel for
you is stronger than myself, stronger
a sudden realization
Of the impotence of mere words-'It
is stronger than anything in the
wcrldr'
He smiled at her vehemence-a
happy smile from which all anxiety
had fed. In his heart were only hap
piness and hope.
To Be Concluded
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-09-20
HOW CHICAGO BEATS NEW YORK
In the World of the Commercial TRAY
elerS.

Here is a floating story which en-
bodies Il character study:
by the way" said the drummer, as
he took a cigar out of his case and
reached for a match, this American
nation has lost lots of money by not
knowing a good thing when it was
crawling around in the grass
"To what do you refer?" asked the
man who had been sharpening his
knife on his bootleg.
ITO this cigar case. Latest fad out
made of snakeslzin and combines
beauty and wear. We might have been
using that sort of material for the last
200 years, but didn't know a good
thing"
Are you sure it's snakes skim"
"Of course. Haven't you been in
New York lately?"
NO"
place on Grand street where they
make them while you wait. Not only
that, but you can pick out your own
snake. The day I went in they had
about 80 of them in a cage, and l was
told to select the one I fancied most
made my choice and he was taken
out, his skin slipped off, and in about
20 minutes | had this case. Very con-
yenient don't you know, and it's a
strictly New York idea"
81 think we can beat that in Chicago
however" said the other man as he
changed his knife to the other bootleg
"Anything new there?
"You bet. There's a restaurant on
State street where they sell Ox-tail
soup at 10 cents a plate, and they
bring in the OK and cut his tail off
right before your eyes. In that way
there can be no deception. They use
about 1000 tails a day.
Must make big lot of bOb-tailed
oxen out your way?
"Oh, it does"
"And bob-tailed OK is not a thing
of beauty.
"By no means; not until he's fixed"
GLOW fixed?'
why, as fast as they leave the res
taurant they are taken over to a place
on Randolph street and dehorned."
"And then?"
and then they are sent east and
sold as Jersey cows. You get your
soup, your horns, your fat and your
Jersey COW. All very simple and con-
venient, you know, and it's strictly a
Chicago idear'
The man with the snakeskin cigar
case sat and thought for while with
a very serious expression of counte-
nance, and then suddenly said:
I've tried and tried, but it's no use,
and I might as well give it up"
whats that%'
Lying! The other fellow is always
from Chicago, and always beats me
out of sight"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-09-20
FOR EMBRYO MATHEMATICIANS

If d goose weighs 10 pounds and
half its own weight, what is the
weight Of the goose? Who has not
been tempted to reply on the instant
10 pounds ?-the correct answer being,
Of course, 20 pounds. 1t IS astonishing
what a very simple query will some
times catch a wise man mapping. Even
the following have been known to sue
eeed:-
How many days would it take to cut
up a piece of cloth 80 yards long, one
yard being cut off every day?
A snail climbing up a pole 20 feet
high asceRds five feet every day and
slips down four feet every night. How
long will the snail take to reach the
top of the post?
A wise man having d window one
yard high and one yard wide, requir-
ing more light, enlarged his window
to twice its former size, yet the window
was still only one yard high and one
yard wide. How was this done? This
is a catch question in geometry, as the
preceding were catch questions in
arithmetic. The window was diamond
shaped at first. and was afterward
made square.
As to the two former, perhaps it is
scarcely necessary seriously to point
out that the answer to the first is not
SO days, but 40; and to the second not
20 days, but 16-since the snail which
gains one foot each day for Is days,
climbs on the 10th day to the top Of
the pole and there remains.-New York
Home Journal.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-09-20
TROUSERS AND SUMMER SHIRTS.
With Some Observations On the Use
of Inverness Goats. /;

My London tailOr>2s sent me c~~1n-
mer flannel suit which I snail wear q
great deal a little later on, says d
Vogue writer. The coat is double
breasted, buttoning three holes. The
pockets are patched on and the gar
ment fits not too snugly.
The trousers are cut wide in the leg.
As I have said before, trousers are
narrower this summer than last. The
bottom openings are cut to fit snugly
about the boots SO as to give the 1880
tapering effect.
I have also received a Thornton in
verness, which will be used this sum
mer in England during the day as we'll
as at night. 1t is of gray covert coat
ing instead of the usual black, and has
a somewhat STACEY appearance, ana
with its black cape suggests the
Johnny who is pictured in the comic
newspapers as waiting outside the
stage door for Louisa.
A word or two about shirts ColOred
shirts of percale zephyr and madras
with white standing collars will be gen.
orally worn. These shirts can be worn
at all hours until candle-light.
The most popular patterns are in
stripes running up and down and not
across. A solid pink or blue ground,
with small white figure is also very
pretty. / saw a man today with one
Of these shirts. He wore a black club
tie, tied a la butterfly. a black vicuna
frock coat dark trousers, patent
leather shoes and top hat His
gloves were of brown chevrette with
one button.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-09-20
OVER THE CARDS

Detroit Free Press: The man was
losing every game at cards and the
lady on the other side Of the table
was laughing at him. 'tAh, WELL" she
said, in sarcastic sympathy, when he
had to buy another basket Of chips,
'unlucky at cards, lucky at love, you
know"
Yes" he responded with a smile,
"and [ guess it must be true, for you
see I am still a bachelor"
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-09-20
ALREADY TASTED.

Detroit Tribune: The royal household
was the picture Of despair.
The imperial food-taster had struck
in sympathy with labor uprising on
the planet Mars, and starvation stared
the anointed in the face.
They dare not eat.
Presently the great light of hope illu-
mined the countenance Of the crown
prince.
'Let US" he exclaimed impetuously,
"have hash"
And falling upon their knees they
gave thanks for their salvation.
Wood County reporter. [volume] (Grand Rapids [i.e. Wisconsin Rapids], Wis.) 1857-1923, 1894-09-20

The French war ship Lenielly Of the
training squadron arrived in port at
Montreal and will remain four days.
A committee of citizens, headed by the
Fench consul, called upon Capt.
Deschamps and welcomed him to the
city. A round of festivities IS being
organized in honor Of the visitors
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1894-07-12
For Freer Commerce.

After Aug. vessels requiring disinfec-
ton that enter the ports of Savannah and
Charleston win be disinfected without
charge. Several weeks ago Savannah
abolished quarantine charges, to take eff
feet the last day of this mouth, and on
Tuesday the city of Charleston followed
suit, as our dispatches reported
This cut in port expenses isra movement
toward freer commerce that should be
followed up by putting in the knife
wherever it can consistently be done.
There are, when men familiar with ship
ping come to look at it, numerous loose
ends hanging that might be
shipped off, or taken up 1t
behOOves Savannahians to look
out for these and attend to them. For
every reduction of the expenses of ship
ping that is made is an added attraction
to shipping to visit the port. Cheapened
port taxes means lower freights, and
lower freights mean increased shipments.
The principle of small profits and large
sales-the principle which, followed out,
makes merchant princes''-is applicable
to the shipping situation. 1t is better to
handle two packages of goods at a profit
Of three-quarters of a cent each than to
handle one package at a profit of l cent
The cost to the cities of operating free
quarantine stations will be insignificant
when compared with the results. Liber-
atty in official dealings with the masters
of vessels will make them liberal in their
dealings with the people ashore. The
captain whose steamer was disinfected
free would be more apt to purchase his
stores and coal, if possible, in free port
than he would if he were taxed for every
thing he got For instance, a captain at
this port whose ship had been treated
without cost would be more apt to pro-
vision and coal his ship here than if he
had been charged big fee at quarantine.
But the inducing of captains to trade
literally in the port is merely a side issue.
The main thing is to make commerce as
near free as possible in order that ship
ping may be attracted and the volume of
trade increased
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1894-07-12

Gen. Gordon's ringing and patriotic
/ speech in the Senate Tuesday found a
! ready response in all parts of the coun-
try 1t was timely speech, and it not
only aroused intense enthusiasm and
strengthened the purpose Of every loyal
man at the south aud at the north 10 up
hold the government at any cost and any
sacrifice, but it carried conviction 70 all
of those who are disposed to condemn the
President for calling the regular army
into service at the points Of danger, and
those who are really TO engage in the de-
struction of life and property, that the
government is strong enough to protect
its citizens and compel obedience to law.
The speech showed the Senate its duty
and the resolution of Senator Daniel, APP
proving the course of the President and
pledging him the support of the Senate
and the people, was promptly adopted
yesterday.
It is worthy of notice that the two Sen
ators most prominent in sustaining the
President are from the south. They un-
derstand the southern people thoroughly,
and knew that what they were doing
would have the approval of the south.
The resolution means that the peo
pie of this country will not allow the in
situations of the country or the stability
Of the government to be threatened by
riots or anarchistic demonstrations. 1t
means also that the government is as firm
as a rock, and that its authority shall be
respected throughout the length and
breadth of the land.
IL is not menace TO labor or to labor's
rights. Labor is as much interested as
capital in the preservation of order
Without law and order and peace, the
condition of labor would be deplorable.
The means by which labor earns its bread
depends upon the ability of the govern
ment TO maintain its authority every
where within it's Jurisdiction.
The President has shown no sympathy
for nor against the strikers. He has ex-
pressed no opinion as to whether
or not they are justified in the
course they are pursuing. He
has nothing to do with that matter, or
any labor dispute. He has endeavored
simply to preserve order and remove the
Instructions to interstate commerce and
the transportation of the malls, and it is
his duty to do that. He has done and is
doing, his duty faithfully and frmly-so
faithfully and firmly that he has the
hearty support of all law-abiding and or
der-loving citizens. And Senators Cor
don and Daniel, by their promptness in
committing the Senate to an Endorsement
Of the course of the President, have
brought the south into prominence as the
section of the country that can be de-
pended upon to defend the republic
against its enemies, whether they ARE
without or within its borders.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1894-07-12
Had Tough stomaohs.

Not long ago, Sam Raymond went shooting
with small party OF city hall friends, says
the Chicago Post When the party reached
their camping grounds they found an empty
shack that had evidently been occupied by a
similar crowd not lolg Cefore. The commits
Sary department OF the party had neglected
to provide anything in the nature of solids
and n a consequence. the spOrtsmcn had not
when they reached the shack, partaken of
food for over eight hours.
II I knew Of a wolf that had suffered such
pangS OF hunger as are now gnaWing my
VltalS would erect a monument to his wolf
ship in Lincoln Park said Raymond as they
stacked their guns in the corner of the
Shanty,
one of the silent members Of the party.
who had once Teen a prospector in Colorado
and who had many times refreshed himself
on the baC on discovered, in n deserted shack
began to nose around to see what he might
discover In few moments he said
Well. bows, the Lord has provided" And
he drew from a box a chunk of ham slightly
the worse for wear but in fairly good condi-
ton from the standpoint of crowd OF fam
ishng hunters.
Ike discovery was hailed with shouts of
10y and inside OF fifteen minutes they were
lclSting On the ham.
The second day OF their stay they received
call from the owner OF the shack, who lived
Just through the timber.
say, fellerS, said the old farmer, you
amt eat nothin you found round here, have
ye: left hunk OF ham mere with dose Of
rat poison on it. an 1t Just came to me wnen
heard you shOOtln' that you might think it
was all right an tackle 1t"
We've eaten every bit of it." returned
Raymond, and ] never ate anything better
in my life. For one, l don't propose to go
INTO paroxysms and die at this late hour"
Not man in the party was sick and they
all consider themselves fairly tough men.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1894-07-12
WHO STRUCK Billy Patterson p,

Col. John Tracy. superintendent OF charl-
ties was enlghtening a few persons not so
well informed as himself in the Shoreham
yesterday as TO the origin Of the expression,
Who struck Billy Patterson" says the
Washington Post
1t had its origin in the death OF young
man from sheer fright. said Col. 1rdcy-
''Haziug at colleges some years ago was even
rOuEher sport than now, and common plan
was 10 get hold Of a new student. try MIN Ior
some imaginary Offense. condemn him TO exc
cutlOn. then mold his head on block "nlle q
blow was struck on the ground near Oy WIN
the dull side OF Ratchet student nameu
William Patterson, an innocent soIt
OF a country boy. was caught a snort
time after his arrival at college ana
tried in this way. OF course ne was
found guilty with all the sOlemnlty that ms
captors could assume. and was led weeping
and shouting to the block. He was pima
folded and held down. told that his last Gay
had come. and then the bogus BLOCK was
struck with Ratchet. His cries ceased IN
stantly and when the alarmed students tore
off the bandage which bound his eyes ana IeIt
his pulse they discovered that the victim OF
their hazing was dead several lnyesuga-
tions were held to try TO ascertain who struck
the fatal blow. and IL was because II was
finally ascertained that no one ever struck
Billy Patterson at ali that the aggravatng
question referred 20 was shouted to every
stranger by street boys, bOOtblacks, and such
like
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1894-07-12
PERSONAL.


Count Renato Pfola- Caseui, who was one Of
the worlds fair commissioners rom LAZY .is
about TO marry Miss Mary Phelps bf New OH
leans. so there VIII be another Edition % ne
ALREADY large number Of titled Arnartcens ~
Rome. Count PiOla- Caselh after MS mar g
VIII remain several months in ne 6uiteo
States.
Robert E. Stone Of Lexington KY, has
just erected over the grave Of his dog mon
ument that cost $3.50 The stone is pointed
smart OF seashOre granite elaCorately ana
Ianeuully carved 1t has deeply cnlseled
inscription Don. fer sixteen years our
silent brother and friend. his faithful dog
snail bear him company"
Susan B. Anthony says she belongs to no
political party, and doesn't know which party
she would join If she had a vote. After watch
ing the progress of political parties for the
last thirty years If Susan Is. dOesn know yet
which Is the right party to belong to II is yeFy
much to be doubted whether she is quanhed
Tor intelligent citizenship.
Sarah Bernhardt says that before present
ing 'Izeyl' TO the Paris public she made
deep study Of Buddhism TO get the neces-
sary local color for her role. The French
actress contesses to great admiration Tor
Ellen Terrys methods on the stage, AMI says
that she mas initiated some Of them with
profit. L adore the lyceum. says sarah; L
60 to school there
One Of the few survivors of the late Sir
Henry Layard's exploring expedition to Min
eveh In 1919, is Prof" Walter F. Carman,
who is Low living in Philadelphia. At the
time OF the expedition he was a steward in
the British navy: now he is tattoo artist, 70
years old, and crippled with rheumatism.
lamp, excavated with his own hands from the
ruins Of kiueVeh.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1894-07-12
How Mosquitoes Spoiled a Picture.

An interesting story is going the rounds in
Lyons about young man who has achieved
considerable renown' both IN Europe and
America as a skilled artist his speciality be-
ing landscape scenes, says the Rochester
Democrat. While out driving in the northern
part of the village he discovered a combina-
ton OF landscape and sunset which he de-
clded would prove to be a great hit if trans
ferred To canvas, in fact 1t was de sided to
paint the scene and place it on exhibition in
Paris this fall. The task was begun and
everything went along smoothly until mos
quitoes began to put in their appearance, and
phew what mosquitoes they were. They
gathered round the young artist in great mum
berS, admired his work and made luncheon
of the painter. How to get rid of the tor
menting comforts Of New Jersey life was
mystery.
Finally happy idea struck the artist He
would build what is known hereaOouts as a
"smudge.' or brush fire. which he had been
informed would drive the tormenting mOSdui-
toes away. The next night the brush hre,was
k1ndled. The artist worked assiduously but
in peace. so far as mosquitoes were concerned.
although the smoke was rather annoying at
times. Finally the wind carried the smoke in
another direction, and the painter became so
deeply ABSORBED i'm the work that he did not
notice the fire spreading until just in time to
seize canvas, pallet, brushes and stool and
escaped hurriedly from the devouring flames.
The ire continued TO spread until il had de-
voured the entire foreground of the propo sed
masterpiece, and now the artist Will t1e o.
ture get in its work in the meantime before
conditions will be at all favorable for the re-
sumption of artistic work and the compile ton
of mis- masterpiece.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1894-07-12
The State Campaign.

The meeting Of the state democratic
executive committee in Atlanta Tuesday
calls attention strongly to the state cam
paign. The decision of the committee not
10 put out speakers until after the meet
ing of the state convention will be gen
orally approved. II is true that the pop
ulists have already begun their campaign.
but they have nominated their candidates
and have adopted their platform.
Democratic speakers could hardly do
effective work before announcing their
platform and ticket. What they can do,
however, and what the executive commit
tee decided to do, is to have everything
in readinessfo for the campaign Immediately
after the state convention has completed
its work. And there is a good deal of
work that can be done before the meeting
Of the convention. Speakers are to be
provided and assigned 10 various districts.
County executive committees are to be
conferred with for tine purpose of finding
out the strength Of the opposition and
what is needed to be done to bring out the
full democratic vote. Such information
is necessary in order that the campaign
may be conducted intelligently and eff
fectively.
No doubt Mr.. Atkinson will have much
to do with shaping the campaign. He
proved himself to be shrewd POLITICAL
manager in the last state campaign, and
the experience gained then will be help
ful Be him now.
The aim should be, and doubtless will
be, to arouse the greatest possible amount
Of enthusiasm in the democratic masses
What is wanted is a full vote If the
democratic vote can be got to the polls the
result win be an old time democratic ma
jority.