Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1894-01-18
Sprinkles OF Spies.

"a fSuuEcC ot run
Sprinlles OF Spies.
A BOX party-the Christmas shop
per. Philadelphia Record.
LUMBERMEN are not necessarily
loggerheads. Lowell Courier.
A GROSS oUTRAeE- finding it a few
packages short. Florida Times.
TALK about women being Eighty,
ook at bank cashiers Texas Stiff
ings.
AN empty stocking can be pro-
nounced a false yarn. - Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
NOT even Il canal horse would ever
get ahead If he didn't have pull.
Boston Transcript.
Ir is a poor cordage trust that has
not more than one string to its how.
Washington Star.
A MAN can talk himself out of
Job easier than he can talk him elf
into one -Atchison Globe.
The blossom has left the button
hole these influenza days and settled
on the nose. Omaha World.
WHEN the Hawaiian patriots say
they "have the spirit of '76" that
takes in about all of them. Plain
Dealer
JAGsON says you can't blame the
atrical company for being spiritless
when the ghost won't walk. Elmira
Gazette.
STRoNG-W Would you call Supplies
wife handsome? Weak es--if I
was talking to Supple. -Raymond's
Monthly.
THE money man tucks away in
his inside pocket" may be looked
upon as vested security. -Yonkess
Statesman.
WHEN you speak to youth about
book learning these days he thinks
you are just in from the race track.
Dallas News,
BLoRBs-Why do you call your girl
a silent belle? Slobbs Because I
kissed her and she never tolled.- 49,
Philadelphia Record.
IT argues no lack OF ability in n
boy that he doesn't make an opening
for himself by going skating on toe
thin ice. -Phiadelphia Times.
THE iron founder may be large
proportioned man. but he never yet,
in his business. succeeded in casting
a shadow. y onkers Statesman.
Your neighbor appears to have
failed great many times, ".]ust
twenty four times. The next will he
his silver bankruptcy. "--Fliegende,
.}laetter.
MISS RACoN-"On the ranch we
girls ride the horse bare backed"
Mr. Knickerbocker (severely)-"I
should think the sun would blister
you terribly "-Scrihner's.
"WHAT is your objection to private
theatricals?" he asked Of the sour
faced man "The publicity that is
invariably attached to Them" was
the reply. Washington Star.
SllE--'I wonder if there will be,
anything to talk about in the next
world" He-"Oh, yes. You know
there is always something to say on.
the other side. Boston Transcript.
V1sIToR-"And which is the older,
Tommy, YOU or Wilie?" Willie
Were tie" Visitor-( mysti1edD -
"What do you mean by tie?" Tommy
-"We're twins. Philadelphia Rec
ord.
LIFE is full of disappointment
Many girl who expects to marry
and settle down finds she has to set
tie way up on the top floor OF ten
story tenement house. -Elmira Car
zctte.
"CAN / change my occupation un-
der the terms Of this insurance Ecl-
icy?" "What do you wish to be-"
"a football player" mo" "Can
become Brazilian insurgent?"
" es. Life.
PRoPRIEToR-"Wh tho row at
that bargain counter" Floor walker
--"No row at all. A party Of college
girls are al~ong the crowd, and are
working TO the front by flying
wedge Puck.
VExED WIFE-"There is no calanr-
ity that can Defall woman that /
have not suffered" Amiable Hus-
band Wrong, my dear; now, you
have never been widow" Vexed
Wife-"I said calamity, sir!-Brook-
lyn Life.
LADY-"There were chickens in
those eggs you sold me yesterday.
Are you going to make me pay for
them?" mo, ma'am, as you didn't
order spring chickens, Wen list
charge 'em TO you as eggs, Ray
mond's Monthly.
OvERGRowN CoLoRED BoY-sSay,
boss, don't ycnh wanter hoy Ter 20
learn TO be a iock?D Horse-owner-
Any the time you've learned TO ride
yeull lie too heavy" BoI-aDen You
kin be. on de odder horse, an YOUTH
have shuah thing, boss. Good
News