The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1894-07-29
CHILDLESS MARRIAGES.
The Judge Cites the Union Of Won
MOItke in His Support.

Is Too Often Sacrificed for the Sake
ofthe Children-A Mans Opinion of
Married Life and What 1t Should
Consist Of
Mary L. Bisland In st. Louis Republic.
"Mv dear lady, the question does not
admit of a doubt in my mind" observed
the white-mustached judge, stirring his
tea II know there is theory that hav-
ing children tends TO bind husband and
wife closer together. But, believe, me,
the idea is a sentimental fallacy, having
no foundation in fact
Naturally, his heretical opinion brought
forth Just such a storm of indignant pro-
test as might have been expected. Every
woman in the tea house, except one sad
faced widow sitting in the corner, rose up
in her wrath, cried ''Shame!" and at
tempted, to annihilate the old lawyer with
argument. He was not to be suppressed,
however, and by bit of shrewd diplo-
macy sliced the floor, and was soon
holding forth again upon his favorite
hobby.
Just as we all have the defects of our
qualities, " he observed, 80 do all of our
losses bring their own compensating bless
iugs | do not deny but that the sacred
lows sorrows and responsibilities of pa
ternity broaden and sweeten the charac-
ter of men and women. A man is usually
spurred to his noblest efforts, woman to
her hottest sacrifices by the unselfish love
which children inspire. But that is not
the question. Paternity Individually
does elevate human nature, but | can
prove to you that it is one of the most
serious dangers to threaten welded
happiness.
why, Just the other day, met an ac-
ouaintance whose wedding had attended
few years ago. the old gentleman con-
tinued, land was soon informed that his
nose was out of joint, that there was a
Richmond in the field, and he was play
ing second fiddle to youngster less than
3 weeks old. He spoke of his son as a
magnificent fellow, and | could see that
he had not yet acknowledged to himself
the small Jealous pangs underlying his
paternal pride. And l am sure that he
was cOnsoled by the idea that as soon as
his wife fully recovered he, the husband,
would relegate Master Baby to his proper
secondary place.
But, alas, and alas il too often hap
pens that the young mother, torn be-
tween two loves which should never be
allowed to conflict, yields TO the newest
tyrant and becomes his bounden slave |
realize" the Judge went on smiling
blandly upon his unsympathetic audience,
that the perfect woman is so balanced
that her duty and devotion to her hus-
band and children are single har-
monlOus chord of affection. 1t makes
the one dependent upon and incomplete
without the other.
But consider the good ordinary woman
with her first child. Up to the time of
the babY's appearance she is her hus-
bands constant companion and the more
charming and tender she is the more he
comes to rely upon her for tho sympathy
all men crave. And even the best of us
are selfish dogs, who refuse to understand
why we must be mere prime ministers
where we previously reigned supreme.
Now you ladies just put to yourselves
the case OF man who has labOred hard
all day in an Office, pluckily meeting and
battling with the odds of business, and
comes home at night always tired and
frequently sore, from conflict. In all his
bachelor dreams Of welded bliss he had
pictured the welcoming wife, soiicitous of
MS smallest worry and compensating him
lor every pinprick by her demOnstrative
tenderness. 1t was to be his reward for
manly fight with the world And sure
enough for the first few months or years,
until his son arrived on the scene, Mary
was all and more than he had imagined
her. She was sweetheart, wife and COM
but ali change comes over the
spirit OF his dream AT first. as l say, he
consoles himself with the idea that her
Insertion is merely temporary, that as
soon as the novelty wears Off the young
Ster will seek his level, and all will be as
before. Therefore, although the draw
ihg-room is lonely waste, and the Ii
orary, where they have had such good
tlneS, mocks at his forsaken condition, he
Oears up, feeling sure it will come out all
Hght IN the end. Comforting himself in
tnls fashion the days slip into weeks, the
weeks INTO months, and yet he might
almost be bachelor again for all the
real companiOnship he gets. Mary is
pretter and sweeter than ever; he is
more IN love than before the wedding,
out somehow or other it seems impossible
theSe days to hold her attention ten sec
ohus together. AS for the little larks
ana excursions they used to enjoy so
much Mary looks shocked if he merely
suggests them. Baby is invariably too
hungry, too sleepy, too young or too old
!or her to think of leaving him, although
mere Is thoroughly reliable woman in
sle nursery to whom higher wages are
pa1 than to any other servant in the es-
Enlistment.
AS one, and then another son and
laughter increases the family they alb
sorO Ihe wlfe's time more and more. She
sees TO 1t that Johns clothes are well
,ooked after, the house kept tidy and the
tqoa carefully cooked to his taste, but
1lGse things attended to she puts him out
y! her mind. 1t is more of relief than
o.uerwlse to have him spend an evening
a. the club. And in the spring Mary is
uouud TO leave town early on the child
teu account If she ever found time be-
sMeen the babys teething to examine her
ywh heart, | am sure she would find
Suhn image undmmed She loves,
HuSts and admires him ardently, and If
husband and children were balanced in
feet '- --N ~ POI
/ et all this while stupid selfish John
sHaS gone through many varying phases Of
o!hR. lie has been amused, surprised
turI and Indifferent by turns. Mary is
"y absorbed 10 be aware Of any Of them,
ffHa IL Is by imperceptible degrees that
G,r r husband has slipped further and
U ther away from the close union which
"aHss The perfect marriage.
d, No", OF course, IL seems rather brutal,
III, can see you ladies' think IT, 10 crlti-
r. women for faithfully fulfilling the
'yesl mission OF her sex. As IN the
my GAYS Of marriage Johns reliance
n Aer FOR love and sympathy made
g.Ais sis devoted servit0r, ia the same
Master Baby's greater helpiessness
900 IHFsar.f.f....