The Calhoun chronicle. [volume] (Grantsville, W. Va.) 1883-1984, 1894-12-04
PITH AND POINT.

Sclf-confidence is an excellent thing
if there is good reason for it. Puck.
It's n good plan when you get the
worst of 1t to make the best of it
Puck.
The man who goes ont to meet
trouble will have ashort walk. Rams
Horn.
Even royalty has it's drawbacks. The
Mikado of japan is constantly attend
cd by nine doctors. Puck.
When man loses his head he al
ways retains the portion that aches.-
West Union Iowa) Gazette.
Higbeo-"M Loveleigh always
fires one with sweet thoughts. " Brad
ford (sadly)-"Her father doesn't. -
Life.
The Optimist Now rs to women,
generally speaking" The Disagree
able Man--"Yes, She generally speak
ing. - Chicago Tribune.
"Dear little hand he murmured
rs he kissed her hand and mentally
reckoned mp what the rings on it had
cost him. Harpcr's Bazaar.
Aunty--'Well, Willy, what do You
like best about schooI?" Willy
"Not havin' to stay home an run er.
rands. Chicago interOcean.
wish your mother were also my
mother" said he, looking at her ten
derby. CAN right, she said, 81 will
be sister to you. New York Press.
Thccanii late
In ship OF state
l. sailing where strong winis arc blowing,
But what TO him
Seems weird an dim
Is just which way the OLD things going.
Plain Dealer.
"Ethel-"He was very attent We to
me. | wonder if he knows that have
money!" Clarissa-"You say he was
very attentive to you?" Ethel-"Yes."
Clarissa- "Then he knows it."--New
York Press.
Dusty Crust--"Can you help poor
man who lost all in tho forest iires?"
Lady of the House -" What did you
lose?" Dusty Cru5t--"rhe tree un-
der which 1 was sleeping. Chicago
Inter Ocean.
Employer binding his clerk asleep
at the desk Look here, Meyer, you
can clear out at the month end.
Clerk (peevi shly) -"Well, you needn't
have wakened me so soon for that. -
Dorfbarbier.
Mr.. Kipling is beginning to take
deep interest IN dairyIng, Vermont
correspondent says. Every morning
he inilks-but that's an udder story, az
Rudyard himself wouldremark. Phil
sdelphia Ledger.
Nibbitt-"That woman who Just
went out is the partner Of your joys
and sOrrows, / supposeY RuftOn-
"5he's partner to my joys oil right;
but when it comes 20 my sorrows, she
slips over to SEQ her mother. Tit
Bits.
He-"Can I see Miss Smith," Ser.
want (who knows him) "No, sir;
she's out" He --"Out where? Out
with some other fellow" Servant
"No, sir; she's out with you, sir.
That's what she told me, sir. - Wash
ington Star.
First Lawyer -"What are you going
to do now that your client has con-
iessed?" Second Jawer-"Put in a
plea Of insanity. A man who will
make a confession when he has me TO
defend him must surely be ins1ne>"-
indianapolis Journal
Husband-'T fancy we are being
robbed by our servant girl, so, in or.
der to find her out, / have left my
purse lying on the table" Wife
'Then come, let Us look at once how
much money did you have in it?"
Husband -"Dcnr me, quite forgot
to count !''-Tit-Bits.
There was man walking by, and
he was thinking what a perfect-looSing
fellow he was, and he was therefore
serene and happy. But he would not
have been, perhaps, had he heard the
remarks Of the animals: ellis ears
are too small" said the ass; the ele-
plant thou yht his legs too slender,
and the giraffe exclaimed, Mercy,
what a short neck - Boston Tran
script.