New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1894-02-04
HOME AND SOCIETY.
NOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL HOSTESS.

.csr.xrs OF CHARITABLE WOMEN - BUSINESS
LIKE HOUSEKEEPING PRINCESS MELITA-
SOME PRETTY HATs--woMENs HANDS.
.,fr, Sis considered such a successful hostess.
No. think she lacks discernment." said pretty
a2butante as she slipped her fve-oclock tea at the
house of q friend II settle down at any Of
h.r dances or receptions TO have a few minutes
comfortable talk with but she PUSHES up
with some whom she presents with running
accompaniment OF compliments. and then carries
away my friend. leaving with stranger with
whom / much more apt TO be bored thah not.
"she means we'll. and people appreciate that
replied the fair young matron as she poured out
hsr own cup Of tea but she does not possess the
POWER of putting herself in his or her place She
knows her guests a class. ard not as individuals.
She bustles about creating every one allke. never
stopping to think that though Miss " loves to
dance Miss Y does not, and so disturbs many
nleasant tete-a-tees by continually bringing up
men 10 the latter who she fears Is a hopeless wall
Aower little careful observation would soon
teach her who were congenia and who not; but this
evidently never occurs to her. Now watch Mrs. Nj
next time YOU dine with her and how she dis
Germs the feelings of her guests; how deity she
relieves the man whose wandering eyes betray his
lack of interest: how with apt excuse she
changes the companion Of some listless young
woman to one who arouses her vivacity. Then, too.
have YOU never noticed when the men have left the
dancing-room. how carefully she will devote some
of her time each of her lady guests? She will
draw YOU down beside her on the sofa with a
nleasant But l have not yet had single chance to
talk with YOU 1 do want to hear all about
your summer and. besides, | must tell you such
pretty thing my Eeighbor at table said OF YOU Her
mowers Of sympathy give her Infinite tact. for
though she is something of fatterer, she fatters
with discernment. and never makes the mistake of
complinentng clever woman upon her clothes.
or q clever man upon his capabilities for leading
co.,Iion She discovers what We would each like
90 be- and gently persuades that is what we are
DO you wonder that all find her so charming?
charitable women, in their eagerness pro-
vide for their special hobbies. sometimes dispose
OF other peoples goods and chattels IN a way mat
a. TO say the least slightly irritating to the own
ers who however generously they may feel dis
posed like naturally to be approached with tact and
consideration 1t having been decided not long ago
by the managers of a philanthropic institution that
II was necessary TO raise at once quite a large
sum OF money. concert was proposed and the
next question was at whose house the entertain
ment should be held. THE cool way In which
various houses suggested and criticised. SAID
one Of the lady managers afterward. STRUCK me as
beine really fmpertinent Mrs. So-and-So would De
delighted to lend her house. am sure some one
would say but II Is not large enough 1 should
think Mrs Parvenu would be glad OF chance to
show the magnificent tapestries that she has just
drought over from Europe suggested another
and so on. Half a dozen houses were proposed ana
rejected and their merits discussed without thelr
owners even being aware Of the honor proposed for
ithemr'
Every refined woman wants TO look neat and
,6ainty indoors and out. How can she accomplish
This? II is hard do unless she has either large
income or plenty Of leisure. Absolutely perfect
snea.ness usually means enormous laundry DIS
maid who shall care for every detail of ones gar
,rnsnts and enough clothes to permit Of an appro-
priate gown for all phases OF the days happenings
The great secret Of such daintiness, an English
writer says is never TO wear dress IN the mousse
that one wears in the street "a skirt which hangs
without creases as walks along the streets
mus. be one which has never been spoiled by being
ca, unon in the house. The frock that looks az II
newlv nut on within doors preserves Us freshness
nv never having been speckled with mud on rainy
day The Princess of Wales and her daughters,
especially the Duchess OF Fife. who Is capitai
walker always have their walking skirts an men
or two shorter than the ordinary mortas one meets
rbese slxirts are naturally TOO short 70 wear In the
house and / imagine It must be a fixed rule OF ue
Irincesses 10 change their frocks Immediately on
re-epterng the house. Apropos or frequently chahs-
lng ones clothes. 1t Is known thing rhat among
other reasons why the officers and privates OF 'he
English Army keep. the whole. In such good
.>everal times during the day
One thing which the sterner sex rarely rean~es
=. that tho beautiful simplicity which II adm'res
M much in women Is a very expensive thing. A
karSectlv plain cloth gown be neat and becoming
must be exquisitely cut and made by an artist and
sven the wearing Of print gowns would not De an
:anonomy since "danfness' would demand con-
3tant succession Of clean ones.
: n I, a great mistake for people who can at all
lhard times On one occasion during the 0eco"d
r,,,n,rs xhen there was great financial depression
n o,,,s NAPOLEON commanded his Ministers 10 open
tbeip houses and entertain profusely; ana inc cou
circles taking the hint began such rounu VI
~avetv That trade revived. while the manufacturers
,,,ck,ns I'D courage opened their mills ana a crlsis
was averted. Spending is as much duty win the
$ch AZ saving IS with the poor, and 1t taxes poth
attributes to make a prosperous community.
.r,,e,a,itv but not. waste should be the house
reaners golden rule by which she insures comfort
md plenty In her household and good service on
4he mart of her domestics But 1t IS Impossible u
ACCOMPLISH this desirable result without active
personal supervision of every detail III women
,rord onlv look upon their housekeeping as a man
considers his business In the hight or an imperative
and daily duty, to be accomplished calmly ana is d
matter Of course, putting up with inc uha'o'uao'e
,-,a,s and dsagreeable complications as the neces
nary concomitants of every organization they wouid
worry less and accomplish far more. II ~ FOOLISH
either 70 moderate 70 magnify domestic duties
and house rnistresses apt to do either the
one or the other: whereas they should look upon
their household affairs simply in the light OF IN
Variant and legitimate business belonging 70 theii
department. and one which 1t behooves them &c
manage well.
A clever woman has expressed this IDEA capitally
In these sentences: "A woman Is generally IN
cned either to fret under her duties or shirk then
~ she can She sees man triumphantly pursuing
hi. vacations and thinks It Is the kind OF work ht
does which makes him regnant: whereas 1t Is mol
the kind OF work at all. but the way In which ant
the suiri. with which he does IT, II mistress anC
servants could only he brought TO consider waste
as unbrsinesslke and system. not as tho tyranni
cal r,le of n stern mistress but just as much &