The midland journal. (Rising Sun, Md.) 1885-1947, 1893-12-08
And then gin him about three full

Atth VliCh 3 Al bOOuU lCC 1u14
smiles and Sez:
''The mop is ahangin' up behind the
back room door and the brush
and blaclin' are in the suller-way, and
the lamp-chimney cleaner is a-kangin'
up over the kitchen sink.''
For so arjous had been my work a.
doin' that immense churnin' that my
usual mornin's work wuz neglected and
ondone.
What are you a-goin' to do?' he
yelled
II am a-goin' to charm you, Josiah.
'Wimmen are made to charm men.
They should do nothin' important. A
clean house is important; therefore,
will not clean. Eatin' is important;
therefore, will not cook. will emu
late the rose in its wisdom. l will
| charm and be silent"
| And 1 leaned back in still more
luxurious attitude in my cushioned
chair, and smiled quite good deal at
| him.
Are you dumb lunatick2" sez he.
''Or what duz all you?"
And he put on his glasses and looked
| closer at me.
But still sat demute and graceful as
l could, and still tried faithful to al
lure and charm him accordin' to the
rules laid down by big men and ap-
| proved by smaller ones.
\ But anon as l looked, | see change
come over my pardner's face. His an
| cry mean subsidized, and look of in
tense and questionin' alarm and agony
swept over his eyebrow.
| And l see him glance at the campfire
bottle. And anon he turned silently
and reached up the stairway for the
soapstun, with his eye on me all the
| time.
And he sez, in low, appealin' axents:
| Don't you want to be rubbed, Sa-
mantha? Where is your worst pain?
Won't campfire relieve you? Shall |
/ go after Miss Gowdy or the doctor?
Don't you want your feet soaked?" sez
he, a glancin' toward the tank.
| Sez l: Josiah Allen, 1 don't want
soapstuns or campfire. want reason
| and common sense in my companion;
| that is what want to relieve me.
have tried jest as faithful as ever a
woman did to foller after the rules you
read this mornin'. You said you loved
the men that wrote 'em, and if / would
only foller them rules you would be the
| happiest man in .Jonesville or the world.
l have follered 'em faithful for about
| twenty minutes, and it has reduced you
to the condition of a lunatick. If twen-
ty minutes of it has brung you to this
state, what would hours and days of it
do, and years. Now it has made you
lose morals, tear round use indecent
language, break your word with gro
GERS, and act. Now if you have had
enough of my follerin' them rules, say
so, and will STOP"
'Oh, dumb the piece, and dumb the
fellers that wrote it.
l turned away from him and ag'in
broke out in that sweet and winnin'
smile. and clasped my hands allurin'ly
over by bask waist.
He stamped on the floor; he kickedl
But kept firm and smiled onto him,
and ag'in 1 called him ''sweet. darlin'
pet"
That was the time when he kicked
the boot-jack acrost the floor and
| jammed the clothes-press door to that
extent that one pannel has been loose
to this day.
But will draw the cur tains on their
brass rod over the scene. But suffice it
to say that at twelve o'clock land he
said he hadn't had mouthfuI to eat
in forty-eight hours) he capitulated
with no terms.
He said: "Dear Samantha, have had
enough of the rose act. l have had
enough of allurin' and charmin', now l
want some meat vittles, and I want
'em quick"
So got right up and got as good a
dinner as hands ever got, but quick.
l briled young, tender fowl, I h ad
already dressed; / smashed up some po-
tatoes with plenty of cream and butter
into 'em; l made orange puddin',
quick, but delicious-it would fairly
melt in your mouth. And had some
rich yeller coffee that would do your
soul good to partake Of
And while 1 was a-gettin' the dinner,
and if you will believe it, such is my
tact and my faculties for tur - off
work, l got time to finish thac last
layer of butter, and imegiately after
dinner put snow-white cloth over it,
sprinlzled it with salt on top, and Jo-
siah sot off in good season, after all.
for Jonesville.
And, at his request, l put on my
brown alapaeky dress and rode down
with him.
And as we went along we visited,
very agreeable He was very affection
ate (owin' to that coffee, and partly by
his feelin's for me-he worships me).
He said: THAT sweet, flowery talk
read we'll, and made men feel kinder
generous and comfortable to write it,
and men feel dredful sort O. patronizin'
and good natered toward wimmen to
read it, but 1t wouldn't work worth a
cent"
No" SEE I. "And felt like fool a
settin there a-tryin' to allure and
charm, a-smilin' stiddy. when 1 knew
everythin' wuz at loose ends in the
kitchen. l was as happy agin' when l
wuz out a-gettin' your dinner"
Sez L: II don't know when l am hap
pier than when am maxim my home
a comfortable and agreeable one-a
gettin' good warm supper for you
when ! know you are a-comin' home
tired and cold and hungry at nightfall.
When l am a-goin' round, reasonable
and calm in a clean kitchen, a-broilin'
plump fowl or cooEin' some oysters,
and cream biscuit, and coffee or some
thin else good-a settin' the snowy
| table and a-lieepin' a bright fire a..