The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1893-08-23


scandals, fights, courtships, marriages
and other matters of moment. To-day
alarge crowd had gathered, for arumor
was abroad that Big Tom Latimer and
Polly Ann Rallin we're soon to get
married in the face of her fathers op-
position. The Rallin family was the
leadin' one of the county, old Tom
Rallin having n large farm several
horses and "cow brutes" and, by all
odds, the finest breed of COW dogs that
ever yelped at tree in Lewis county.
Big Tim and Old Tom were at the
mill, and as the latter was q man of
hot temper, a fight between the men
was hopefully anticipated. Big Tim
was handsome, good-natured fellow,
who would fight only when necessity
commended. He was standing fitting
stem into q new cob pipe when old
Tom approached and said:
81 hearn you an my gal wuz fixin
ter marry?"
eve amt fixin', ole man." placidly
returned Big Tim.
''Ye ain't?" hopefully questioned old
Tom.
"No; we are already fixed-er haw,
haw, hawl"
The old mans fingers punched them
selves into hard fists, and his eyes
glittered like new dirk knives a-whirl
ing in the sunshine.
'Fixed!" hissed old Tom, "6xed
You lazy, good-fer- -nuthin' rascal, P6
like ter know what you got ter marry
on?"
GIVE got my dads puncheon hool
to marry on, eff we can't get ter stant
up on yourn - returned Tim with {
loud exasperating laugh.
'You think yer terrible smart, dom
YEP" said old Tom, curling his upper
lip into a vicious snarl.
"Yas, am smart whar the hides
off, az my ole grandad uster say-el
haw, haw, haw, haw! Iv course Tn
er smart man, and am we'll awar' nv it,
er l wouldn't have the brass ter try
ter marry in the big Rallin family A
fool couldn't git gal like yourn tel
agree ter walk the puncheon er mater
mony with him. He must be smart
enough ter keep up the family credit.
Polly Ann amt no ham eater, az my
ole grandad uster say. She's some
punkins herself, an she knows er smart
person like me, as soon as her eyes
runs over his face. cum from a smart
set of people. One NV 'em-an uncl,
served az road overseer in MagofiI
County fer ten years, an wu'
iist on the pint o bein
'lected constable, when a gun went
off in patch O. bresh close to the road,
whar he wuz passin' along, an kille-
him. My great grandad wuz also el
smart man. He talked six different
wimmen inter the notion o being his
wife. He wa2 awful smart At the
age of ninety-six, he waz still smart
He waz peart enough ter set out on the
fence, on nice warm days, an watcl
his old woman chop off hickory bush
log. Oh, tell ye, old man, I'm moi
ter be grinned at by them what has ne
teeth as my grandad used to say. I'm
er smart feller, an tharll be no retri
gradin' in the stock as long az any o
the Latimer blood IL in er family-el
haw, haw, haw, haw !"
The impudence of Lati
mer was actually fascinating to ole
Tom. While the big, good humoreC
fellow went rollicking on in the above
style, it was impossible for Old Tom t.
keep his sober countenance. He trie,
his utmost to keep looking fierce, bu
ever and anon he would grin in spit,
of himself.
At the conclusion of Tins pedigre,
he said: "Tim, amt got no time to
hear more o. yer foolishness, I"
"What ye in n hurry about? ye 60
lots o. time. The ole miller sed Nwhil
ago that we couldn't git our grindin
till erbout dark, and (glancing up n
the sun) hit amt more nor two o'clocl
now. That bein' the case, we'd jist a
well put in the time a-gasin' az not
The fack il, ole man, you're Il might,
interesting ole feller TO talk to. Yo'
may not believe me, but l conside
you ter be the only man in this kentry
outside o. myself, what knows how te
talk real smart talk-tho only maj
whose travelled and collected food tie
feed the hog ny mans intellectus
mater an make it squeel for morcl
like q man that kin 60 to when tn
stomach NV mer mind is empty an sl
drawn IN, an oit tha hmm An eggs 4