The Dickinson press., 1893-10-21
MANS INCONSISTENCIES.
As Enumerated by One of His Low
Ing, hut Critical Sisters.

As Enumerated by Ono of His Low.
Ing, but Critical Sisters.
A man can r,ke his life i'll his hand
and go boldly into the traclllr>s prai-
rie to meet Il herd of savage h%ufaloes.
or he can traverse the horrows cf iii
African Jungle without Il shudder i'll his
body. But he caunot ctter Il fancy
wool shop to mattel. 4 special hue with
out breaking into !: violent perspira,ion.
and finally rushing away without full
filling. his task.
A ina. can suffer the amputation of
a lim.b in heroic silence. but he cannot
endure Il mustard plaster on his chest
without shrieling alold for mercy. says
the Cincinnati Enquirer.
A man can bca- the deprivation of his
wealth with the caln.ntsS of Il stole.
but he csnnpt los, his collar stud on
the bed. ON floor Without Il violent
oGthmSt of temper.
4 IL az can ,nuure the p al-S of hun
ger OF 81 desert island Mil. Il brave
spirit. hut lie cannot cat his brides
frs, pudding without Il smcihcretl rJac-
ulation.
\ man can smile grimly under the
fortunes of the rack. but he cannot
tread on Il tin tack With his bare foot
without Il big howl.
A man can walk forty miles Il day
and arrive fresh and bright mt the
end of his journey, but he cannot nurse
Il baby half an hour without complain
ing that he is utterly Worn out.
A man can calculate to the uppermost
farthing the cost of the Suez canal.
but he cannot estimate the price of Il
woman's bonnet without cgrcgiouS cr-
rOrS.
\ man can possess he physical
strength Of Il Samson. but he cannot
help to take down the pictures for the
annual spring cleaning without feeling
completely exhausted with his labors.
4 man can heard the savage tiger in
his lair without Il CULVER of his muscles
hut he cannot bring an unexpected
friend to dinner III Il washing day
without trembling in every limb.
A man can suffer death at the stake
with the dignity of Il martyr. but he
!, cannot chase after his hat i'll Il public
) road without looking ridiculous.
y HILL SSlll MttlN lisNhiN StA IA lAOuN
! silence for the public appreciation o.
his work, but at a domestic crisis he
cannot get up and light the fire ever.
day for il week without feeling tina
: lie is tit for immediate canoniZation.
A man viii 20 through fire and watel
to win the girl of his heart. but liz
will not allow her to 500 him With I;
, four daTs' growth on his chin.
Look Out.
f Young ~Tish-There's a hook with 8
nice worm on 1t.
Old Fish-Kccp away from that.
Young Fish-I've stolen lots of worm.
off of hooks.
Old Fish-Ycs. but there isn't an,
. fashion plate reflected in the watel
!; this time. That hook belongs to /;
freckled-faced boy. with a ragged straw
Mathew York Weekly.
On the Field of Combat.
= After several passes, II of the an
: tagonists had inflicted a scratch on tn
. other, and was of opinion that homo
was thereby fully satisfied. But on
?" VI llC StCUuuS, NhO SAliAAiSN y NAoN
all about such matters, declared tina
the wounded man was we'll able t
d continue the fight. Whcrcupon tn
duellist politely handed him his sword
" saying:
e Then you amuse him n bit; I'm don
If up."-Le Monde Illustrc.
=, 4 Gross differentiation.
Maud-Have you seen Tom this morn
ing!
,r Jennie-No; and 1 don't want to Sc
him"
Maud-Why not? Have you quar-
relied?
t. Jennie-No; but he's a brute. Whe
the bathing master rescued me fror
d the undertow yesterday, Tom told lii
t. lie wanted to make some suitable recoi
milton Of what he had done, and CAV
IL him n OnHrter.