Saint Mary's beacon. [volume] (Leonard Town, Md.) 1867-1983, 1893-07-27

that he was obliged TO open his
mouth to breathe, he remained so
much oppressed.
| He set himself to reasoning with
himself upon the possibility OF this
thing:
Shall | be afraid p
| No, certainly not, he would not
be afraid, because he was resolute
to 60 10 the end; because he had
his will fixed firmly to fight, and
not to tremble. But he felt so
deeply troubled that he asked him.
self (:
Can aman be afraid in spite Of
himself p
And this doubt invaded him, this
uneasincss, this dread. III some
force stronger than his will, if some
commanding and irresistible power
should conquer him, what would
happen He should certainly APP
pear on the field, since he willed to
do it. But if he trembled? ? But
il he tainted And he thought of
his situation, of his reputation, of
his name.
He remained upright before the
mirror. lie put out his tongue as
if to test the state of his health, and
all of sudden this thought entered
into him after the fashion of bull
let:
The day after tomorrow. at this
time, shall perhaps be dead
And his heart began again to beat
furiously.
The day after tomorrow, at this
time, shall perhaps be dead. This
person before me; this II which |
see in the glass, will exist no long
er. What, here / am: am look
ing at myself. Ifeel myself to live,
and in "a hours l shall be laid to
rest upon this couch dead; my eyes
shut, cold, inanimate, gone
He turned toward his bed and he
distinctly saw himself extended on
the back in just the same sheets
which he had just left. He had
the hollow face which dead men
have, and that slackness to the
hands which will never stir more.
So he grew afraid of his bed, and,
in order not to look at it again, he
passed into his smoking room. lie
took a cigar mechanically, lit it,
and again began to walk the room.
He was cold; he went toward the
bell to wake his valet; but he stop
ped. his hand uplifted toward the
bell-rope.
THAT fellow will see that / am
afraid.
And he did not ring; he made
the fire himself. When his hands
touched anything they trembled
slightly, with a nervous shaking.
His whole body vibrated, jerky
tremblings ran over it; he got up,
and approaching the window, he
opened the curtains.
The day was coming, day of
summer. The rosy sky made rosy
the city, the roofs and the walls.
A great fall of tenuous light, like a
caress from the rising sun, envel-
opod the awakened world. .
And so he was going to fight duel.
He could no longer escape that.
What could be passing within him:
He wanted to fight. He had that
intention and that resolution firmly
liked, and he felt very plainly that,
Notwithstanding all the efforts of
his mind and all the tension Of his
viii, he would not be able to retain
strength enough to go as far as the
place of the encounter. He tried
to fancy the combat, and his own
attitude and the bearing of his adj
versary.
From time to time his teeth struck
against one another in his mouth
with a little dry noise. He tried
to read, and he took mp De Cha
teauvillard's duelling code.
His pistol case by Gastinne Re
nette lay on little round table.
As he passed he opened and took
out one of the pistols, then placed
himself as il to shoot, and raised
his arm, but he trembled from head
to foot, and the barrel shook in all
directions.
| The he said !:
1T is impossible, | cannot fight