The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-12-06
RIGGS'S TEETH CAME OUT.
Bat Not Until he had Wrought Havoc
With tho Dentist,

In the heart of the meadows of
Hackensack lies a little swa,np-sur-
rounded village which people call
Arlington. Here lives John Riggs,
Esq, quiet person.
Like all the Riggses John ia quite
corpulent. His muscles, however,
are al we'll developed as those Of an
OK, and altogether John has as fine a
physique as you will find in day s
journey. The only pain he ever felt
was in his teeth. John teeth were
always very bad.
In this sfrog-surrounded village there
also lives DR.. L. E. Estler, dental
surgeon-.a mild-mannered little man,
who wouldn' hurt fly unless the fly
wanted to have a tooth filled. DR..
Estler's Office is cosey little place,
on the second floor Of brick building,
with nice big windows, through which
the sufferer can see the sky.
A third inhabitant of Arlington-in-
the-Swamp is Mr.. Thompson, the
druggist, whose store is directly below
DR.. Estler's Office. Mr.. Thompson is
a very strong man, though not quite
as strong as Mr.. Riggs, and when he
makes up his mind to do thing it is
his pride to do it.
And last of the dramatis persona
there is DR.. Lightfoot. who often
drops into Mr.. Thompson's store and
grumbles about the fine health of the
community. Now the story begins.
On Friday morning Mr.. Riggs
teeth began to ache like fury. The
nerves Of the molars jumped and
thumped and bumped, and the nerves
of the bicuspids buzzed and sized,
and the nerves of the incisors danced
and leayed and frolicked in their tiny
canals--and Mr.. Riggs wished he were
dead. He felt each individual nerve
making frantic efforts to burst through
the tooth into the open air. When
he opened his mouth the cold air
trebled che pain. When he closed it
with snap he felt several million
devils shooting through his nervous
system with barbed pitchforks in their
hands. Mr.. Riggs went to DR.. Est
ler' 8 Office.
"Oh, Doctor" he groaned. "Pull
'em out. Pull EN- all out"
The dentist examined them care
fully, and then said:
'I'll tell you, John, I can stop the
pain for you, but it will only be q
temporary relief. You'd better have
them all out and get plate.
"Oh, Lord Pull 'em out Pull EN-
out p
"Do you want them all out ?"
"Pull EN- out Pull EN- all out
Oh-h-h-h This is hell p
"Now just hold still for moment
and I'll give you gas. Easy, now
There Keep your mouth open--wide
open. That's it Now take long, deep
breaths.
He had placed the mouthpiece Of q
tube connecting with tank Of nitrous.
oxide over MIR. Riggs's mouth and had
| turned or the gas. Mr.. Riggs took q
| great many deep inhalations. Pres
emily the look of anguish vanished
from his face and an expression of
perfect delight took it's place.
"M-m-m-m II he mumbled through
the mouthpiece.
The dentist face assumed deep
frown.
"Keep pstill!' he said. "I'm afraid
the gas has no effect on you.
"The hell it amt Hoopilie-e-e-e +
He had torn the mouthpiecc from
his lips and was whirling it around
with great rapidity.
"Stop that, "cried the dentist OF
Pip
"stop what ? Hey ? Bif! Hoopilie-
e-e-e."
The mouthpiece struck the dentist
on the nose. The next moment Mr..
Riggs fell back in a comfortable posi-
ton in the chair and kicked his feet
into the air. Unfortunately, one foot
struck the big window pane. The
| glass fell to the sidewalk and broke
into hundred pieces. The hole in
the window seemed to give Mr.. Riggs
great delight.
"What's the matter with me
Hey ? Pull me teeth if y dare
Hoopilie-e-ee !"
A pair Of forceps flew through the
hole out into the street. At that
moment DR.. Lightfoot and Mr.. Thomp'
son, who had heard the crash Of glass,
burst into the room.
"For heavens sake u exclaimed
Mr.. Thompson. "What-'
Mr.. Riggs had raised himself in his
chair to see who the intruders we're
Seeing two men standing in the door
way he seized tray Of burrs and
pluggers, which lay beside the chair
and threw them at Mr.. Thompson
head.
"What the hell do you want here
Hey Get out or I'll pull your
teeth -
"Here p cried the dentist. "Helr
me hold him He's half full Of gas,
and it won't work. F"
The two men grasped the situation
in an instant and threw themselves
upon Mr.. Riggs. The druggist seized
one arm, the Doctor seized the other,
and the dentist tried to force his head
back. There being no one to hold his
feet Mr. Riggs kicked about as though
his legs were windmills. In one of
their fourishes they came in contact
with bracket which supported the
dentist instruments and his bottles
of gold and amalgam. The bracket,
instruments and all flew to the ceiling
and fell scattering all over the room.
"Here, this won't do !" said the
Doctor. "You fellows hold him and
I'll get some chloroform. "
The Doctor ran down stairs to the
drug store, leaving the others to hold
MIR. Riggs.
"Leggo O. me or I'll break down the
whole bloody house" cried Mr.. Riggs
at the top of his voice.
Lets put him on the floor, said
the dentist.
They seized Mr.. Riggs and dragged
him from the chair. AS he sank to
the floor his foot shot upward and
came in contact with the druggist S
stomach. The druggist emitted a