The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1893-05-28

- ., the ,mbibers simultaneously. Il
aon't uke the looks Of things said ne
.G bei,eve I've got 'em IL | know myseii.
,bis &c my last drink" and IL Is oeheVeo
he's keeping his word. Tue Dar-Neep i,r
would find II advantageous to remove 'he
sign. A.
.,,n, lady recently Informed me
-. ,,.han was writing about NOW
na,o,v Girl might become success l
y'as have made some suggestions IS
-, Young man could estaohsh
~ III "a social hero. Now, In my
~. IA generation things were Inherent
uas o. rsared on a farm, where every
hody retired" with the chickens
,.o,,ry man was esteemed accoiuihb ~
Sts sohrIetv and bashfulness, ana many
.t,h, we sat around the Dis log hres,
ms teamed ourselves especially fortunate
anu ~ o,,er-present knitting chaperon al
lowed us to have five minutes taiN "''
interrupted by sly glances' ,,.,--. -
o., now everything is different III
o-sor "a become popular young man
d,,,ktnR record should not exceed 'hiI
.nan whisky cocktails, three pints ~
ohamnacne. and seven glasses OF Drdnuy
a.. ons evening without the use OF
N ~ ne sure YOU do not disregard TINS
IL 7, is absolutely necessary IN orusI
60 become q general beau his hatleiy
sbould be served in the shape OF DON
bons and fruits, so that II VIII De s"ai-
,'aa a,ith no difficulty. Art should be
I,.t,...od Very often il becomes ne
oo.sarv 10 paint the city. this being
.oorieite among other accomplishments
A. u,omen's bats, however dun lhe
hooks always bite. A good-natured ois-
no.ition Is especially desirable. II Wo-
man insists upon "Galloping over your
a Elections. or even though she persist III
,-t,c n botanical garden upon the
doroa ~ her hat at the opera, thereDy
excluding the entire stage from youi
v,our congratulate yourself on lhe lied9-
IRE she derives. ana think not Vi per
sonal comfort In tho matter. a..
~ snring YOU might Indulge IN
&, en,sn engagement. il you are very anN-
ious n DO penarce for some error.
Nerer make unkind remarks, SHOULD you
have false teeth. A man VINO did hOe
oheerv. this was nearly choked 10 dedtn
nv having his teeth knocked down NE
throat care should be taken as TO "hOih
Won serenade. once knew a man VIZ
returned favors to tom cats. some
one emitted a pale on him. and he mas
been suffering from water on the Dfali
ever since. ,..,.o,
These suggestions may be atoget pre-,
inadequate. but, II closely observer WI
doubtless prove OF some beneht 70 MN
Who IS seeking popularity at the hands
OF the fair sex.
The drivers OF those mule cars some
times have a deal OF trouble in collectihs
fares. Quite naturally, the mule Is an
animal with tough hide ana q snort
memory. and the driver has 10 concen-
trate his attention on the most ehecilYe
means OF using the persuasive power on
the animal. Consequently he has little
time TO see that each passenger pays his
fares. BY some Of the drivers
new plan Of collecting has been adopted,
and I'm most cases II proves very effective.
A few DAYS ago n small boy OF some
eight summers boarded n green car near
Fourteenth and Main streets. After the
manner Of small boys, he stood on the
rear platform and kept his eye on the
movements Of the driver. The latter was
not to be outwitted however, and while
the YOUNGSTERS attention was diverted
10 a patent medicine man near by. the
driver sneaked through the car ard APP
propriated the little fellows straw hat as
compensation for hauling. The younsster
was In a peck OF trouble. and went in
search of his paternal relative 20 get
nickel. Meantime another small boy, who
boarded the car near Fourteenth and
Marshall streets, was similarly dealt with
and he too, went in search OF the con-
venient nickle. Before the car had gone
very far the driver was contemplating
opening hat store. He had collected
four hats by the new policy. on his way
pack, however, there stood the quartette
Of youngsters, each waiting TO redeem
his headgear. The fares were paid ana
the hats returned That driver hasn't
been troubled by the small boy since.
His reputation as an efficient fare-collec-
tor spread with remarkable rapidly. and
those who can't spare nickel 20 be
hauled NJ the Fourtesnth-street hill no
longer hesitate to foot 10.
YOUR UNCLE FULLER.