Washington standard. [volume] (Olympia, Wash. Territory) 1860-1921, 1893-10-27

thar she hadn't lad good drink of cider
since last winter, and the deacons wife
raid Us boys could take pitcher and go
down cellar and draw some.
That was too much. | didn't want
any cider anyway, SO told them that |
belonged to a Temperance society, and |
should break my pledge if | drawed
cider, ami She said was good boy. for
me never to touch drop of cider Then
she told my chun where the cider barrel
was, down cellar, but he amt no SLOUGH.
He said he was afraid to 90 down cellar
in the dark, and so Pa said he and the
deacon would 90 down and draw the
cider, and the deacon's wife asked Ma to
90 down, too, and look at the fruit and
berries she had canned for winter, and
they all Went down cellar. Pa carried
an old tin lantern with holes in it to light
the deacon to the cider barrel, and the
deacOn's wife had taller candle to show
Ma the canned fruit. l tried to get Ma
not to go, cause Ma is friend of mine,
and didn't want her to have anything
to do with the circus, but she said she
guessed she knew her business. When
anybody says they guess they know their
own business, that settles it with me,
and l don't try to argue with them.
well, my chum and me sat there in
the kitchen, and stuffed piece of red
tablecloth in my mouth to keep from
laughing. and my chum held his nose
with his finger and thumb SO he wouldn't
snort right out. We could hear the cider
run in the pitcher, and then it stopped,
and the deacon drank out of the pitcher,
and then Pa did, and then they drawed
some more cider. and Ma and the dea-
cons wife were talking about how much
sugar it took to can fruit, and the deacon
told Pa to help himself out Of crock Of
fried cakes, and l heard the cover on the
crock rattle. and just then heard the
old tin lantern rattle Oh the brick floor
of the cellar. The deacon said, 'Merciful
goodness Pa said, Helen Damnation.
am stabbed and Ma yelled, Goodness
sakes alive and then there was a lot of
dishpans on the stairs begun to fall, and
they all tried to get up cellar at once,
and they fell over each other, and, oh,
my! what IRONY smell came up to the
kitchen from the cellar. 1t was enough
to kill anybody.
"Pa was the first to get to the head of
the stairs, and he stuck his head in the
kitchen and drew a long breath and
said: 'Whoosh! Hennery. your Pa is a
mighty sick man. The deacon came up
next, and he had run his head into a
hanging shelf and broken glass jar of
huckleberries, and they were all over
him, and he said: Give me air. Earth's
but desert drear.' Then Ma and the
deacon's wife came up on on gallop,
and they look tired. Pa began to peel
of his coat and vest and said he was 60
ing out to bury them, and Ma said he
could bury her, too. and ! asked the dea-
con il he didn't notice q faint odor Of
sewer gas coming from the cellar, and
my chum said it smelled more to him as
though something had crawled in the
cellar and died.
well, you never saw o sicker crowd,
and l felt sorry for Ma and the deacon,
cause their false teeth fell out, and
knew Ma couldn't gossip, and the deacon
couldn't talk sassy without teeth. But
you'd a died to see Pa. He Vas mad
and thought the deacon had put up the
job on him, and he was going to knock
the deacon out In two rounds, when Ma
said there was no use of getting mad
about dispensation Of providence, and
Pa said one more such dispensation of
providence would just kill him OH the
spot. They finally got the house aired,
and my chum and me slept ON the hay
In the barn, after we had opened the
outside cellar door 60 the animal could
get out. and the next morning l had the
fever and ager, and Pa and Ma brought
me home, and have been firing quinine
down my neck ever since.