davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1893-06-22
PUN0ENT PARAGRAPHS.

There's one secret woman can
keep" 'What is it2'' "Her age."--
Pittsburgh Dispatch. I
-Slumps-"The blind have an acute
sense of touch" Grumps-"Yes; par
ticularly blind beggars. Puck.
New Yorker-"What makes Phila-
delphia SO healthy?" Philatowner-
"Well, you see, people there breathe
so slowly that they never exhaust the
oxygen as they do in New York;
Vogue.
The stingiest man in town wears
his whiskers foot and a half long for
the double purpose of avoiding bar
ber's bill and to save the expense of
buying necktie.-Yonker's Gazette.
Miss Gurley-'In all your expert
enee in shooting, what game did you
consider the most dangerous?" Mr..
Youngshoot forgetting himself) -
Craps. Inter Ocean.
-"You are the first girl, Mabel, to
whom ever breathed word of love-"
what were you afraid of with the
others? Breach of e?"-Brook-
lyn Life.
The Horrid Memo, those Chi
cago spectators! They are always look
ing for a corner in something" "Yes,
and when they find one somebody is
certain to get squeezed. Judge.
-Cholly-"I've a bad code id my
head" Mayo, well, it won't stay
long" Cholly-"Why nod?" Maybe
TOO
ington.
Mrs. Lighter-"Wasn't that gra-
and sermon?" Mrs. Flesher-"very
good, but too long" 30, 1t made lunch
late, but it was so grand" eyes, yes.
1t contained thought for food. Glove
land Plain Dealer.
-Encouraging.-S Author
(who has just read his last story to his
wife).-''There! that's the best thing I
ever did" His Wife-''Yes, dear; what
magazine shall you send it to frst?"-
Puck
-Doctor-"Well, my fine little fell
low, you have got quite well again!
was sure that the pills left for yeu
would cure you. How did you take
them, in water or in cake?" 60 l used
them in my pop-gun. Tit Bits.
-Manager-"Say, doctor! sent my
leading man around to you to-day.
He's complaining of stupor and all
that. What's the matter with him?"
Doctor-"His liver refuses to act"
Manager-"I wish he was as sensible
as his liver. boston Courier.
Miss Carson has wonderful men,
ory for faces, no matter how long since
she has seen them" How do you
know?'' 81 was with her yesterday
shopping, and she recognized the cash
boy when he brought her change back"
Inter Ocean.
willie" said that young mans
mother, ''you were very restless in
church. "Yes'm," was the penitent
response. "You never see papa behav-
ing in that way. Why couldn't you be
quiet like him?' 'Why, mamma, he
answered frankly; ''you see, wasn't a
bit sleepy."-Washington Star.
"A big double tooth in the mouth of
William Arnold, of Beaver Falls, ached
so hard that it exploded. Nine people
were killed and four houses wrecked.
This latter statement does not appear
in the original item but it might as well
be added now as any time. Let the
hide GO with the tail.-BlizZard.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1893-06-22
VOLUME XXXII
AUNT JEMIMA'S QUILT.

A miracle of cleaning dyes,
Blue, scarlet, buff and green;
o ae'er before by mortal eyes
Such gorgeous hues were scent
So grandly was Its plan designed,
So cunningly twas built
The whole proclaimed master mind
My Aunt Jenima's quilt.
Each friendly household far and wide
Contributed it's share;
1t chronicled the country side
In colors quaint and rare.
From bellies and brides came rich brocade
Enwrought with threads Of gilt;
Fen buxom widows lent their aid
To Aunt Jemfma's quilt
No tapestry from days of yore,
No web from Orient loom
But paled in beauteous tints before
This strange expanse of bloom.
Here glittering stars and comets shone
Ger flowers that never wilt;
Here fiuttered birds from worlds unknown
On Aunt Jemlma's s quilt.
o, merry was the quilting beA
When this great quilt was done;
The rafters rang with maiden glee,
And hearts were lost and won.
NE ct ulu q lnEOUR OI drawer men
In war clash hilt TO hilt,
Than sought the smiles of beauty then
Round Aunt Jemima's quilt.
This work of art my aunt esteemed
The glory of the age;
No poets eyes have ever beamed
More proudly DER his page.
Were other quilts to this compared,
Her nose would upward tilt;
Such impudence was seldom dared
Ger Aunt Jemima's quilt
Her dear old hands have gone to dust
That once were 1.-the and light;
Her needles keen are thick with rust,
That flashed so nlmbly bright
And here it lies by her behest,
Stained with the tears we split,
Safe folded in this cedar chest
My Aunt Jemima's quilt.
Samuel Minturn Peck, in N. E. Magazine.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1893-06-22
Hard Work.

81 wish" sighed the man at the desk,
that were rich and respectable and
didn't have to work
Possibly" suggested his visitor,
'you want too much money"
1.-The Lord knows work hard enough
to be rich"
YES followed the sympathizing
friend, land all men know you work
hard enough to be respectable, with
the same degree of success. Detroit
Free Press.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1893-06-22
Medical Item.

DIR. Fullhouse, Harlem physician,
was suddenly called away from card
party to attend sick patient, Mrs.
Portly Pompous. He took the lady s
pulse and absent mindedly counted the
beats. When he got to ten he con-
tinued: Jack, queen, king, ace"
The lady has recovered, but DIR. Full
house has lost patient, nevertheless,
Texas Siftings.
The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1893-06-22
Exnert Testimony.

Weary Wiggins-It cannot be ques-
toned that our great national crime is
needless, endless, suicidal over-work.
Tired Tolliver-Yes, alas! the beauti.
full art of repose seems lost to us for.
ayer.-Puck.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24
PERSONAL AND PECULIAR

After % years of horse racing Luchs
Baldwin, the California millionaire, mas
decided to retire from the turf. lie VIII
devote himself to horse breeding.
At the last election Mr.. Gladstone
Midlothian majority was only 69o, anu
the Conservatives say that it promises 10
fade away entirely at the next contest
The report of his retirement from 1ne
district, however, is pure fiction In
his last interview with his election COM
nlittee he gave and received assurances
that his connection with his hisVoric
constituency would be maintained.
When the big battleship oregon Is
launched on the Pacific coast Thursday
the customary Ratchet used to cut the
last string will be dispensed with. In
it's place sort of guillotine in miniature
set in motion by the touch of an electric
button, will free the great vessel from
the ways. No ship so big as the oregon
has been launched on the coast, ana the
occasion will accordingly, be marked by
unusually elaborate ceremonies. A feaJ-
ure gro wing out of a misunderstanding
will be the participation OF
WI taC h1DAuS -
Miss Ruth Dolph, the Navy; and Miss
Eugenia Shelby the city of Portland.
The honors have been divided to avoid
the unpleasant consequences of the mis-
take m de in inviting too many young
women to officiate.
Sportsmen and their newspapers in
England are mourning over the decad-
ence of the turf. Never before has the
list of titled patrons been SO small, and
there is no sign that the rising genera
tion of Lords Will recruit the depleted
ranks The names of the men
who have been lost to the turf recently
show what racing in England has sui,
fered. Lord Calthorpe is dead. Lord
Gerard and Lord Hastings have with
drawn. The Dukes of portland, Beau
fort and Devonshire own only two racers
each. Lords Cadogan, Penrhyn and
Londonderry are reducing their studs
rapidly, and the Earl of Dunraven is too
| busy with yachting to revive the de-
creasing glories of the turf Lords Rose
berry, Zetland, Durham and Ellesmere
are now the only peers who remain
staunch to their loyalty to the turf, and
upon them the British sportsmen are rest
| ing their hopes for better days. The rich
mem bers of the House Of Commons have
left the tracks almost as rapidly as have
the peers.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24
PORTLAND DAILY PRESS
MAINE STATE PRESS.
Snhscrinfion Rates.

subscription haCess
DAILY In advance) Sc per year; So for six
months; $3.50 quarter so cents month.
The DAILY is delivered every morning by
carrier anywhere within the city limits and at
Woodfords without extra charge.
DAILY (Not in advance, invariably at the
rate of 81 year.
MAINE STATE PRESS, (Weekly) published
every Thursday, So per year; 81 for ixmonths;
so cents a quarter; 20 cents for trial subscrip-
ton of six weeks.
Persons wishing to leave town for long or
short periods may have the address OF their
paper changed as often as desired.
Advertising Rates.
In DAILY PRESS S1.5o per square. first
week. rs cents per week after. Three inser-
tons or less, S1.oo per square. Every other
day advertisements, ono third less than these
rates.
BALI square advertisements $1.oo per week,
first week; half price each succeeding week,
"a souare'' is.a space Of the width OF col
umn and one inch long.
Special Notices, on first page, one thlfa al
ditional.
A,nalseneasts and Auction Sales, $500 per
SQUARE each week Three insertions or less,
$3.50 per square.
Readduq Notices in nonparell type and
classed with other paid notices, 20 cents per
line each insertion.
Pure Reading Notices in reading matter type
o5 cents per line each insertion.
Wants. TO Let, For Sale and similar adver-
ments. rs cents per week, in advance. Tor 40
words OF less, no display. Displayed advef-
t;seroants nnder these headlines, and all adver-
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In MAINE STATE PREss-Sl.oo PEI square
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Address all communications relating TO suo-
scription and advertisements to PORTLAND
PUBLISHING Co., 81 EXCHANGE STREET
PORTLAND, ME.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

The currency of the United States may
be classified as follows in round num-
bers: National bank notes about 40 mil
lion dollars worth; greenbacks about 345
millions; gold coin and paper represent
ing gold, about 532 millions;
and silver coin or paper repre-
sentating silver about $40 millions.
Should the compromise proposed in the
Senate be accepted it is estimated that
about 100 millions would be added to
the currency of a silver nature, thus
making about 700 millions in all of
that form of money. The metal on
which his vast amount of currency is
based is.alarmingly deprecated as COM
pared with gold, which is the basis of the
remainder of our currency. Can that 700
millions of silver be kept on par with the
REM, Ter of the currency? This is great
qr3sef and the answer to it is doubtful
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

If it be found true that the Machias
is not entirely seaworthy on account
OF being top heavy with guns and other
equipment placed too far above the water
line, the blame for this state of things
will not lie at all with the Maine build
ers. The plans of all men of war are made
by the Navy Department; and a defect
of design is the fault of the naval de-
signer.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

II may be that after the Senate has
shown its incapacity to meet the de-
mands of the country, there is nothing
left for the President to do but sign a
compromise The whole thing is one of
the most melancholy f1zzles ever charged
to the credit of respectable representa-
tive government.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

There is probably no truth in the rumor
that Senator Harris, of Tennessee, ad-
vised killing the Vice President if he
should attempt to force a vote in the
Senate. But Isham G. Harris is the very
fellow for such a story to attach to-. In
war times he stole the State of Tennes-
see and carried it out of the Union
against the will of the majority of
its citizens.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

The old familiar news comes that Tam
many is colonizing New York with lille
gal voters, in preparation for the coming
election. This kind of business the fed
eral election laws have made difficult;
and that is why the Democracy want
to be rid of them.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

Considerable adverse criticism is di-
rected against the Senate for confirming
man like Van Alien, while Mr.. Horn
blower, an irreproachable nominee for
the bench of the Supreme court, where
his presence is needed, is not confirmed.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

The reckless management of the affairs
of the city of Brooklyn, N. Y, by the
bosses who control has not only made it
difficult for the city to float its loans;
but also the citizens are finding it diff
cult to get New York bankers to loan
money on Brooklyn real estate. Not the
hard times but the Boss-McLaughlin
times have brought this about.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24


What it means for a nation to be on a
silver basis, while the great monetary
powers are on a gold basis, is illustrated
by the example of Mexico. The bonded
indebtedness of the Mexican Central and
Mexican National railroads is greater
than that of the Repu bile of Mexico.
The money was borrowed abroad on the
gold basis, and the principal and inter
est have to be paid in gold. On the
other hand the earnings are in Mexican
silver. Moreover third of the expenses
for new equipment, etc., has to be paid
in gold values. Thus, while the fixed
and portion of the running charges OF
the roads are steadily ON the gold basis,
the receipts are on the constantly set
thing silver basis. From 1886 to 1892 the
mean value of the Mexican dollar was
such that gold was at a premium OF
thirty per cent as compared with it.
This year the premium is still higher,
40 per cent being nearer figure. The
earnings of he.railroads SO. far have not
responded in such a way as to narrow
the constantly growing crevasse In their
finances. 1t must be remembered that
many American railroads are built on
foreign capital, and that if we should
come to a silver basis the same disquiet-
ing phenomenon now observed in Mexico
would probably be with us.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24
FINANCIAL.
To Western
Mortgage
Holders.
DO YOU WISH TO KNOW

DO YOU WISH TO KNOW
The present value of property covered
by your mortgage!
The financial standing OF the maker OF
your bond?
Whether or not your mortgage Is d 'ahu
whether taxes have been paid and in
surance kept up?
The Missouri, Kansas and Texas 1rusI com.
pany of * ansaS' City, Mo-, having competenS
and reliable attorneys and correspondents III
every county seat in the Western STATES, Is Pre-
pared to furnish you with accurate ana as
interested information as to the value Oh your
security. the worth of your debtor, the Title 10
your lands. the condition of the Improvements,
and all other facts affecting your security.
We will see to the paying OF taxes. pro,c ,aI
ing insurance. collecting interest ana pflhcipdi
We have found cases recently Where proper
ty has been decided for taxes, and mortgages
fOreciosed without the knowledge OF the hoiaef
of same,
BOARD OF DIRECTORS AND ADVISORY
BOARD.
A. i. stillwell v. P. X. C. Sub. Co. Belt R.
R., Kansas City. Mo.
G. A. Dean. Vice Pres, National Surety Co..
Kansas City.
E. L. Martin Pres. K. C. Pc. G. r. R., Kansas
City,
j. Med. Trimble, Attorney, Kansas City, Mo.
A. A. Mosher, Pres. X. G. and l. Air Line II.
r., Kansas City.
j. Z. McKeighan st. ous, Mo.
W. s. Woods, Pres. Nat. Bank OF Commerce,
Kansas City
E. Henry Barnes New Haven, Conn,
H. A. Lloyd. Asst. Secretary Wabash r.. R.
Co., ST. Louis.
A. Heckscher, New York City.
E. p. Merwin. Banker, New York City,
Charles E. Granniss, New York City.
VIM. waterfall Manufacturer. Philadelphia.
Vim. d. Black, of w. u T. Smith, Bankers,
Philadelphia, Pa.
W. H. Lucas, Manufacturer, Philadelphia.
DR.. H. M. Howe Capitalist, Philadelphia.
John. IF. Dryden. Pres Prudential ms, Co.,
Newark. N. j.
E. W. Marsh, Peoples Savings Bank, Bridge
W. S. Taylor, Pres. Texarkana F. S. R. R.,
Kansas City.
Frederic Bronson, Capitalist. New York.
: Chas. L. Hyde, Banker. New York.
EFT. Attwater Barnes, Pres. Board Trade,
New Haven.
j. DeGoeijen Holland.
We refer, by permission, to the following;
CENTRAL NATIONAL BANK, Philadel
ri TRADEMEN's NATIONAL BANY, Phila-
PKovIpENT LIFE TRUST CO.. Phila-
UNION TRUST CO., Philadelphia.
NAT. BANK OF COMMERCE, Kansas City,
METROPOLITAN NAT. BANK, Kansas
STATE TRUST CO.. New York.
TRADEMARKS NATL BANK, New Haven,
Conn. Address
Missouri, Kansas & Texas Trust Co.,
KANSAS CITY. MO-,
or SO WALL ST., NEW YORK,
or 439 CHESTNUT ST., PHILADELPHIA Pa
oct24 Observation-Disclosures
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

Austrian statesmen have dropped their
plan for extending the suffrage. If too
many people get to voting in Europe
they will not permit themselves to be
taxed for extravaganza armies
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

There is but one Marshal Of France
left. The Republic does not confer the
honor; and the French soldier OF the
future must fix his eyes on a bauble
other than the baton which the Condos
and TURBINES strove for.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

New York banks are loaded with
money; but confidence is the smokeless
powder needed behind this charge IN
order to let the business gun boom.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

Ambassador Van Allen, athe papers an
nounce, has arrived at Lenox, Mass,
driving four in hand. 1t is gratifying
to learn that he is no longer.in that
wonderful riding costume. .-.a
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

Good Judges seem to think that the
courting is all on one side in the france
and Russia affair.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24
THE PRESS.
TUESDAY, OCTOBER "a.

Mr.. Greenhalge is awakening old fash
ioned echoes in the Massachusetts, politl-
cal field.
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24
The Boston Herald declares that no

The Boston Herald declares that no
successors have appeared of that remark
able coterie of women which included
Lucy Stone, Elizabeth Cady Stanton,
Susan B. Anthony, Julia Ward Howe,
Abby Kelly Foster, Mary A. Livermore,
and nun bersof lesser lights, and the
revolution which their eloquence seemed
to portend has gone backward instead
of appro aching. Is this quite true?
Women do not yet in most States vote
as men do; but the freedom of their
position has been immeasurably enlarged
since Lucy Stone and her associates be-
gan their careers. In a few States women
have the suffrage outright; in many
others they have limited suffrage. In
the business world, moreover, their
progress has been even more marked.
Who shall say that the telling oratory
of women like Lucy Stone has not had
much to do with this development?
The Portland daily press., 1893-10-24

humor and charm. New York and Bos-
ton: Houghton, Miffiin Company; Port
land: Loring, sShort & Harmon. Price
$1.25.)
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1893-09-07
Tho Gulf Stream.

There is a river In the ocean. In
the severest droughts it never fails,
and In the highest flood it never
overaows Its banks and the bottom
are of cold "ater, while its current is
of warm. The Gulf Of Mexico is its
fountain, and its mouth Is in the
arctic seas. 1t is the Gulf Stream.
There is in the world no other so
majestic q flow of water. Its current
is more swift than the Mississippi or
the Amazon, and its volume more than
a thousand times greater. 1t waters;
as far as the Carolina coasts, are Of
indigo blue These are so distinctly
marked that the common sea water
can be traced with the eye.
Often one-half the vessels may be
perceived floating in the Gulf Stream
water, while the other half is in the
common water Of the sea, so sharp Is
the line and the want of affinity be-
tween these waters; and such, too,
the reluctance, so to speak, on the part
Of those of the Gulf Stream to mingle
with the common waters of the sea.
In addition to this, there is an
other peculiar fact. The fisherman
on the coast Of Norway are supplied
with wood from the tropics by the
Gulf Stream. Think of the arctic
fishermen burning upon their hearths
the palms of Hayti, the mahogany Of
Honduras, and the precious woods Of
the Amazon and the OrinOco.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1893-09-07

Tho Doctor was In the act OF closing
the front door, for the family had gone
TO bed long since, when the squire star
tied him by giving double rap with
his stick on the strong oak pan els.
Dr. Hedges opened the door, and,
shading the candle with his hand, no
let the light fall on the visitors face.
The instant no recognized the squire
he called out;
WHAT you, Squire Condlt, roaming
round at this hour Of night"
The Squire confessed his Identity,
also that he was roaming round then,
and limited that he had no expectations
Of sleep that night
Bless me. Squire, Is there any more
bad news2"
Lots more news, and It's OF the same
kind that Has been coming In all day.
But my business here is to find your
brother, the lieutenant, or Valentine"
eald the Squire, speaking with great
precision, lest the doctor might read his
secret.
"They are very busy on board the Sea
Hawk tonight, said the doctor.
ANY idea of what they are doingp"
"Yes; In accordance with Captain
Fox's orders they are taking ali the
ammunition out of the Sea Hawk, and
sending 1t on board the Wanderer.
How can / get on board at onceP"
Don't know, Squire, unless you
swim, replied the doctor, who began to
think his neighbor little cracked
Then" said the Squire, "I'll go on
board II / have to swim"
LTO BE CONTINUED.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1893-09-07
As Labouchere Sees Us.

In many ways the United States
have educated the world in politics,
says London Truth, and I, for one, do
not hesitate to say that their scheme
Of government is the best that has
ever been established by nation.
But in nothing do we owe more to
the Americans than for their having
afforded us the great object lesson of
a state pursuing the even current of
its way without meddling in the az
fairs of other states, which has been
the bane of European powers. Here
we have a country, rich, powerful, in
dustrial and commercial, yet never
troubling itself with what happens
outside its frontiers; or annexing
foreign lands on the plea of philan-
thropy, or on heground that in some
centuries its area will be too small
for its population, or in order to Gre
ate markets for it's goods. And what
is the result9 No one dreams of at
lacking the United States, or Of pick
ing a quarrel with them.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1893-09-07
An Eminent Meteorological.

Among the many services which
Professor Cleveland Able has rem
dered to meteorology are the transla.
ton Of valuable papers by foreign
physicists for the Smithsonian In
stitution. One collection of them,
mostly from the pen of DR.. Julius
Ham, made its appearance several
years ago. Another has just been
issued under the general title
Mechanics of the Earth's Atmos-
phere," and includes treatises by
Helmholtz, Overlook, Behold, Kirch-
hoff, Hertz and Hagen, to which are
appended writings Of Lord Rayleigh,,
Max Morgules and William Ferrel,
which deserve place in such a
volume. Whoever desires an ac-
quaintance with the fundamental
laws governing atmospheric motions
and engineers and aerial naViga-
tors, as well as meteorologists, are
interested In such matters-will find
these discussions Of great value.
Phillipsburg herald. [volume] (Phillipsburg, Kan.) 1882-1905, 1893-09-07

straight up in the air and shot to.
ward her long slender tongue that
looked like a little black streak, it
moved so fast, at the same time max
Ing little kissing sort OF sound.
That frightened Rebie little,
and she jumped up quickly and ran
into the house to grandma. "Oh,
grandma" she said, "come out quick
and see this funny bug! He goes this
way" And she waved her little fat
fingers slowly back and forth.
Now grandma was busy and she
didn't care to go out to look at bugs;
but the little girl was so earnest and
excited that she went with her
Rebie led her straight to the chicken
yard fence, and there, stretched out
at full length in the grass, summing
himself, was snake. A viper, John
said it was when he brought the hoe
and killed it. And when she heard
what it was, and what it might have
done, Reble was very glad the funny
bug" was dead and could do her no
harm. 81 guess, grandma" she said,
afterward. at was because said my
prayers this morning that he didn't
bite me. Our Little Ones.