The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1893-12-01

W from short engagements
:sssA: that few words, carry
n, ing with them the wis
=SW dom of experience, may
as not come amiss. The
most deplorablo of all matrimonial con-
illusions is the marriage of a miss in
her teens. She is. in. all respects, little
moro than n child-with all a child's
conceit in the extent Of her powers.
Such marriages must of necessity be tho
result of short engagements How much
wiser it would be if the youth and maid
en- would consent to prolongation of
the engagement beyond tho first fever
ish heat of love! a young couple be-
coming engaged on three weeks or Il
months acquaintance should, if the
parents be wise, continue SO at least
year.
Sober common sense should govern ev-
cry action of our lives, particularly the
linking together of two young hearts
Haste under any condition is serious
factor, and it is especially so in forming
the relationship above named. The
youth Of 81 or 23 years and the maiden
of II or Is cannot possibly have formed
habits which will characterize their
after lives. Youth is tho season of
change. and the gawlSy lad just merging
into manhood stands ready to be made
or marred.
The Same rule holds good in the
young girls case. The union of two
tender lives not yet expanded may mean
in the near future a pulling apart. 1t
were we'll if girls would consent to re-
main single until they had passed at
least their twentieth birthday; while
the average young man, by the time he
had reached 26 OF 81, would find that
his ideas of life had greatly enlarged
from the callow period. In such cases
engagements not extending beyond one
year are desirable, for by few meet
lngs each can tell whether he or she is
suited to the other.
Where the law of primogeniture OBJ
tains, as in England, the younger sons
are oftimes relegated to such q posi-
ton that they are not permitted to dis
play much force Of character. AS n
rule, young men of this latter stamp
make fairly good husbands, from the
fact that the wife becomes the presid-
ing genius of the household. Permit
woman to rule, and peace will reign.
1t is when two rulers hold sway in one
domain that the times become out of
joint.
A sensible mother will early instill
into her daughters mind the necessity
OF making wise choice of a mate with
whom to walk through life. Girls
brought up under such jurisdiction sell
dom marry before they have reached an
age at which they may be said to know
their own minds. With them the mar
rlage agreement is not hastily entered
into, and the heart is only yielded up
after mature deliberation and the prom
lse OF an engagement extending over
such period as to permit both parties
to become thoroughly acquainted.
Life is not entirely like the summer
sea-composed of roseate hues. 1t is
more often like the surface of old ocean,
on which storms and sunshine follow in
quick succession. The test of love lies in
its endurance, and only well balanced
minds come out unsecured from life's
battle. In the heyday of life its twilight
is obscured and it is tho ability to meet
both which ccments the marriage tie.
In these rapidly progressive times, when
people rush headlong through life, too
little attention is paid to this most holy
of rites 1t would seem that even the
necessity for its existence were in a
measure passing away. Men and wo-
men, instead of forming coniugal
unions, are arrayed against each other
in individual efforts to secure a living.
And so the battle surges on.
The spirit of the times creates a com
pulsory independence, and woman in
all things considers herself the equal Of
man. This, in many respects, is not to
be doubted, and indeed IN certain fields
she is his superior. The man, never
theless. yet stands king, for in this busy
world might still makes right and the
battle is to the strong. Thus in certain
walks of life it is only occasionally that
woman rises to mans dignity. 1t is
these exceptional cases that are held up
as laudable and worthy of emulation.
Where man, the king, can be counted
as tens of thousands strong, the greatest
woman appears as but beacon light
to the members of her sex.
What we want in this busy workyday
life of ours is that we stand side by side
with man-not seeking favors on the
score of womanhood, but determined
to rise or fall on our merits alone.
Special training is required to fit us for
such task, and the young woman who
while still almost child enters the
matrimonial state finds that the ties of
home and family bind her moro closely
than the tire of the wagons wheel en-
circles the spokes. Properly to prepare