Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1893-02-12

"Ihere ought 10 De some recompense.
We are ashamed To ask for clothing or
our size, and nobody ever attempted TO
design anything for US especially, for
we wouldn't wear IL anyway, no matter
how becoming IL was. il IL had got TO be-
the uniform OF the fat women OF the I'M
iverse, and so there you are"
Then they both had TO get of the
train there, and Ethel had TO borrow
travelling mans sample case for the
short, stout lady to step on as she got
of the coach.
have not been richly endowed by ma
ture with the fatal gift OF beauty, but IL
might have been worse than 10 Is,
though when pass through car and
afterward look back and see the pas. /
sengers examining their watches to see
II they are still running | can think OF :
the short. stout lady and say, What IL !,
too, had been thus?
Written In a childish hand comes re-
quest from little AlonZo Belcher OF East
Rawlse's Center asking this paper how
he can cure soreness OF the tongue.
AlopZo, IL seems, during the cold
weather was acting as understudy for
the property man at East Rawse's Gen.
ter. and ono OF the other stage hands, q
bright young whaleback farmer, got
AlonZo TO accept wager that he
(Alonzo) could not erase with his tongue
the name Of Pistache Oleson, the rising
young Swedish nightingale and child
wonder, which she miss 0leson) had
written In blue chalk on the gas pipe OF
her dressing room while at the Grand
Opera House OF East Rawlse's Center.
Alonzo accepted the wager and now
writes 20 ask about what he shall do.
Alonzo has n large, copious tongue,
which almost encircled the gas pipe, and
outlines OF IL may still be seen there.
For one night he and the opera house
occupied the same apartments. The next
day they logged along together TIL
about noon, when the other stage hands
told the authorities, aud steps were
taken to arrange 10 so that tho opera
house and young Belcher could be used
separately. n
You SEQ. you dare not cut out q pieee
OF gas pipe that way for fear OF as
phyxlation, and they could - cut II or
az the meter, IL seems as the company
had arranged II so that gas would be
consumed" every evening. whether the
house was opened or not, and they did
not see how they could change IL.
A hot shoehorn, however, was APP
piled 10 the tongue, and soon the little
sufferer was removed from the real es-
tate and again became his own personal
property.
He went homo, he exclalms in the let
ter, feeling like man that has redhot
cutie bone In bis mouth and cannot COB
IL out. Ever since then be has COM
munIcated with the outside world wholly
by means OF the pen. No one can even
think OF his great sorrow without Bit
ter and somewhat brackish tear.
How puny are our efforts when wa
find ourselves In the act OF violating q
great natural iawl We must not get on
the mighty turntable OF creation or try
10 cross the side tracks OK solar systems
unless we are employees.
Mr. Belcher will do well TO battle tho
sore place with witch hazel as often as
the idea occurs to him. and keep piece
OF oiled silk between the toughened roof
OF the mouth. so that the two shall not
unite and become one grand whole. to
the injury OF the grand hole that he has
been In the habit OF swallowing through.
gin sling, perhsps-under those clrcum-
stances, but the gin does not assist tho
healing process, and II induces the
tongue 70 wag too freely. One Of the
greatest ways ! ever knew was a gin
sling wag. But why introduce paupeF
made. imported jokes at such time?
Mr.. Belcher, (Which. By the way, II
simply pseudonym) writes also regard
ing his future. enclosing chart OF bis
palm and lock OF his hair, asking 70
know what the future Of one possessing
those things may be.
The thumb Is marked strongly and
would indicate that In yonr early life
you whitfield toward yourself good
deal; also that not many generations
back your ancestors competed with the
wood pecker IN their glad, free scuiiie
for food IN the forest; also that during
the early part Of the eighteenth century,
possibly later, your folks walked on the
palm OF the hand good deal and re-
sembIed the HighbehInds or Bluenosed
baboon OF Lake Dennis, in equatorial
Africa.
The headline runs backward toward
the wrist instead Of forward, thus indi-
eating that you will gradually, a. years
roll on, add more and more 70 what You
do lot know.
The hair does not indicate anything,
and wonld have respected you more TX
you had tolime you had none.
IL IA good, vigorous hair. and seems 70
grow quite rank. indicating that you
are OF Emphatic temperament and
have cool skin well adapted 70 the
growth OF hair and whiskers. too, thai
will toss 70 and fro 10 the summer breeze
az you grow 70 be 4 man and while You
are adding all the time 70 your lack OF
intelligence. thus fttinHourself for
duty as juror ia the -
! J ; , } !! !.
Your hair would at you Ia
herIt from your la1 and thaa
Won are not stro 0u need
out OF door e,S( mDany
an In stser
select hen
burg Fos
REF Pner-