The gold leaf. [volume] (Henderson, N.C.) 1881-1911, 1893-08-31
HENDERSON, N. c, THURSDAY, AUGUST
How he FOUND CHRIST.

How HE FOUND CHRIST. !
GREAT MANS CONVERSION. /
President Charles G.. Finney Tells His |
Experience as Seeker After Truth
and Light as it is Found in a KnOwl-
edge of the Lord Jesus Helpful
Thoughts for Young Men.
The thought was pressing me of the
rashness of my promise, that l would
give my heart to God that day or die
in the attempt. 1t seemed to me as
if that was binding upon my soul and
yet I was going to break my vow. A
great sinking and Encouragement
came over me, and I felt almost too
weak to stand "a upon my knees.
Just at thismoment again thought
I heard sea,e one approach me, and l
opened my eyes to see if it were so.
But right there the revelation of my
pride of heart, as the great difficulty
stood in the way, was distinctly shown
to me. An overwhelming sense of
wickedness in being ashamed to have
human being see me on my knees
before God, took such powerful pos
session of me, that l cried at the top
of my voice, aud exclaimed that I
would not leave that place if all the
men on earth and all the devils in
hell surrounded me. "What?" I said,
'ssuch degraded sinner as I am, on
my knees confessing my sins to the
great and holy God and ashamed to
have any human being, and sinner
like myself, find me on my knees en-
deavoring to make my peace with my
offended God!" The sin appeared
awful, infinite. 1t broke me down
before the Lord.
Just at that point this passage of
Scripture seemed to drop into my
mind with food of light: "Then
shall ye 60 and pray unto me, and l
will hearken unto you. Then shall
ye seek me and find me, when ye
shall search for me with all your
heart" 1 instantly seized hold of
this, with all my heart. had intellect
ually believed the Bible before but
never had the truth been in my mind
that faith was a voluntary trust instead
of an intellectual state.
|
I was as conscious as I was of my
existence, of trusting at that moment
in Gods veracity. Some how l knew
that was passage of Scripture, though
1 do not think had ever read it. 1
I knew that it was Gods word, and
Gods voice, as it were that spoke to
me. l cried to him. "Lord, take
Thee at Thy word. Now Thou know
est that do search for Thee with all
my heart, and that l have come here
to pray to Thee and Thou has prom
ised to hear me"
|
That seemed to settle the question
that could then, that day, perform
my VOW. The spirit seemed to lay
stress upon the idea in the text,
"When you search for me with all
your heart" The question of when,
that is of the present time, seemed to
fall heavily into my heart. l told the
Lord that should take Him at His
word that He could not lie; and
that therefore was sure He heard my
prayer, and that He would be found
of me.
He then gave me many other prom
ises, both from the Old and New Tes-
lament, especially some most precious
respecting our Lord Jesus Christ. l
never can, in words, make any human
being understand how precious and
true those promises appeared to me ;
l took them one after another as in
fallible truths, the assertions of God
Who could not lie. They did not
seem so much to fall into my intellect
as into my heart, to be put within the
grasp of the voluntary powers OF mind
and l seized hold of them, appropri-
ated them, and fastened upon them
with the grasp Of drowning man:
l continued thus to pray, and to
receive and appropriate promises for
r long time, l know not how long:
prayed till my mind became so full
that, before l was aware of it, l wa:
3 on my feet tripping up the ascent to-
ward the road. The question of my
being converted, had not SO much a:
arisen to my thought; but as wen
up, brushing through the leaves and
bushes, I recollect saying with grea
emphasis, "If l am ever converted,
r will preach the Gospel"
x X
, soon reached the road that led te
the village, and began to reflect upor
S what had passed !; l found that m!
, mind had become most wonderfully
. quiet and peaceful. l said to myself
"What is this? l must have grievet
t the Holy Ghost entirely away. l hav'
, lost all my conviction. l have not ;
: particle of concern about my soul
a and it must be that the spirit has lef
t me-" "Why!" thought I, 81 neve
a was so far from being concerned abou
my soul in my life"
e Then / remembered what had sait
, while 1 was on my knees-that hat
n said that would take God at Hi
' word and indeed l recollected
e good many things that 1 had said, ant
v concluded that it was no wonder tha
, the Spirit had left me that for such
sinner as was to take hold of God
word in that way, was presumption
S not blasphemy. I concluded that il
e my excitement I had grieved the Hol
a Shirt and DerhaDS committed tn