The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-12-20
BRIGHT BITS.

He-This is a bird's-eye view Of my home;
She-Yes, notice It has kind of Jay ap-
pearance Chicago Tribune.
What is your objection to private theatri-
| calls he asked OF the sourfaced man.
"Ihe publicity that is invariably attached
10 them was the reply.-Washington Star.
She-I wonder II there will be anything TO
talk about IN the next world.
HeIoh, yes. You know there is always
something TO say on the other side.-BOston
Transcript.
Train Robber-Come. shell out
Rural Minister fsadly)-If had such ener-
getlc fellows as you to pass the plate now ahd
! sneh' might have something TO give you
New York Weekly.
MI Ret1reson is very modest man. He
would blush if you even spoke to him"
Wen, he may G modest, but why, in the
name OF goodness. do YOU take me for an illus
tratlon: Newport News.
Mistress-Has your cousin place yet
Nora-No. mum. She haven't, an her only
wan year over, an grown that particular that
she can't PLACE herself!-Puck,
Miss De Scord's piano playing always re-
mlnGs me OF a certain scriptural injunction -
What is thats''
she does not let her left hand know what
her right hand doeth."-Puck.
Dyspepsia Specialist drritablyl 49, But,
madam, you must chew your food What were
your teeth given YOU forE
Female Patient (calmly)-They weren't
gwen TO me; bought 'em.-Tid Bits
Temperance Orator-How strange that a
man will put an enemy into his stomach to
steal away his brainsi
Voice in Audtence-Great Scott. Is that
where you CARRY your Reconsideration Life
Proprietor-What's the row at that bar
gain counter?
Floor-walker-No row at ALL A party OF
college girls are among the crowd, and are
working to the front by a flying wedge
Puck.
Miss SWIFTLY guess Edwin is being con-
to him, now it is known that we are en-
gaged2
Miss Severly-Perhaps they are comparing
notes-Puck.
"A good many new business houses are 60
ing up on broadway" remarked a stranger
to New Yorker while they were riding on
the Broadway cable cars
Yes. =" replied the other with a sigh. "ours
went up the other day. Texas Siftlngs
Visitor-And which is the older, Tommy.
you or Willie?
Willie-We're q tie
d, Visitor stihedJ-what do you mean by
Tommy - We're twins. - Philadelphia
Record.
Mr.. Skidds feeling his way)-Miss Fosdick.
what salary do YOU think young man ought
to have to marry? a.
Miss Fosdtck with well simulated SURPRISED
MY gracious Mr.. Skidds, do young men de-
mand salary for marrying nowadays
Harper's Bazaar.
Mamma-TOmmy, what are you going to
Duy mamma for her Christmas gift?
Iommy-Why, momsy dear, I've thought
ana thought about that. and 1 decided that
the best thing could get for you would be a
pair Of new skates for your little boy.-Har-
per's Young People.
What do the natives do in Africa when
they go into mourning for their relatives
DO they wear black:'' asked Mrs. Portly Pom
pous of returned explorer.
II 1t is very heavy bereavement they
simply take of the few clothes they otherwise
wear. Texas Siftings.
Little Corinne-I know a awful funny story
t'owence. My mamma told it to me when 1
had the dipferia.
Florence-Tell it to me won't YOU?
Little Corinne-Oh, I can't cause YOU
might catch the dipferia; don't you see?
Harpers Young People
Papa" cried little Willie. as the clock in.
dlcated 3 in the morning. No answer.
! Papa, cried Willie again and again and
again Finally papa got up and walked into
the nursery, rubbing the sleep out of his
Well, what on earth do YOU want at this
hour of the night he said
Well, papa" said Willie sitting up in bed
II Grover Cleveland's first name was Jimmie
what would his last name be?'-Harper 3
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