Wheeling register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1878-1935, 1893-10-01
"But you don't really think that you
can decefYa your own stomach?" said |.

Dub you uOu \ lOh4lY bnlnh hhou yOh
can deceive your own stomach?" said L.
Certain. 1 know by experience.
You saw me perform with that pill.
There's an example. In the first place
1 oughter taken it out'n the green
bottle. But l noticed long ago that it
didn't make a bit o. differe nee. 1t had
the wrong bottle with me an just quiet
ly passcl it over an said nothing the
pill did me jes' as much good. But let
me talk an make a fuss, calm Zimri's
attention to the fact, an there'd be no
end o. trouble.
"You don't believe me? Well, let me
call your attention to jes' one thing
that you must a noticed. Suppose you
amt had a bilious attack in Two months,
an you sit up an brag about It. Does
your liver ever pass it overP Amt you
perfectly dead sure to be fat on your
back within tWenty-fOur hours? But
il you go right along grumbllng about
the same as usual an pretendin' not to
feel any better than your average per-
hsps your vitals may not get arter you
In six months"
could not deny that 1 had noticed
something Of the kind.
"SDeakin' Of your vital organs" con-
tinued the dyspeptic, ''the only way to
do is to fool 'em. For instance my
doctor says to me: Abel Walker, don't
you eat candy an SIGH unless you feel
ripe for paradise. Stick to three meals
a day Now like sweetstut. think
good old red and white stick candy is
more pleasant In the mouth than the
best chewin' terbacker. But Zinri
won't have 1t. He behaves fairly scan
dalous when he sees 1t. But l can
smuggle IL down with my meals al
not be any sicker than ordinary. II l
finish my regular dinner By half-past
twelve, / can eat candy up TO two
o'clock an pass 1t off on Zimri for pud-
dim"
We left the dining room and stood
for some minutes on the main deck, aft
Of the paddle-boxes, where we could
look at the water. By this time we
were getting down toward White head
and the ocean was before us. There
was q stiff eastern breeze, but the
staunch steamer made food weather OF
It, and there was no sign Of sea sickness
aboard except in the eye OF Abel
Walker.
Smooth as q mill pond, amt it?" he
said. Then he winked at me-, and made
a peculiar gesture in the direction 81
Zimri. Sitting my conscience l replied
that l had rarely seen a smoother sea.
At that moment a schooner drove by
uuder a double-reefed foresail with two
men hanging on TO the wheel.
Eyes, indeed, Mr.. Walker, said ], 'ft
is q very calm evening""
Along about nine o'clock l perceived
q man approaching us who evidently
knew Mr.. Walker. They greeted each
other and I was introduced. Presently
the stranger said:
81 didn't see you at supper. Hope
had in two years.
yes" said Abel, eft was a good sup
per. L"
1--WE done 1t now" he cried.
"Done what?" l asked an1iously.
Admitted that shat was supper.
Zimri's got me now. That pie! Two
pieces! OH" ,
He made lice luIch for the rail, and
for the next twenty minutes he was the
busiest and the un~happiest man between
Key West and Calais.
'If ye want proof" he gasped, "here
We have 1t. Can a Teller tell the truth
to such a stomach as mine? No, sir.
Can he fool itP How was l a few min
utes ago? A well man. Oh, Henry
Bates, why did you come aloSg with
YOUR blank catechism and draw the
facts out of me like this?'
have not related this incident solely
on account Of its medical value; but
rather to illustrate q superstition
which I have found to be very common
In the for-down-east. 1t is that every
separate vital organ is Inhabited and
dominated by a demonical tenant who
hears and thinks and executes ven
gesnce. This belief may sound strange
but really it isn't. A prolonged diet Of
salt fish aud pumpkin pie will make
any man believe that the devil is in his
stomach. In that faith was nurtured,
and my digestive machinery during my
youth was such as TO give me a very
high idea of the power and resources
Of Satan. HOWARD