The Salt Lake herald. [volume] (Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1870-1909, 1893-11-26

A North Carolina turkey gobbler re-
Gently scratched up eight potatoes in a
garden and has been sitting on them
for several weeks. The result, I take
it, will be quite as satisfactory as the
outcome of the alleged contest by
Conkling, Axton, Eichnor, ct al.
Here is warning to Mrs Hen Peck:
In dispute with a member of her
family, Miss Emma Lindsay, of Ohio
Falls, Ind, became so excited that she
fell to the floor in a swoon. She has
since been blind and speeches., al
though the quarrel occurred several
weeks ago.
The women and clergy of San Fran
cisco are endeavoring to purify the
press Would it not be better to purify
society first, from head to heel? The
press is able to take care of itself. It
is but a reflex of it's surroundings, and
many morsel of scandal is rolled I'M
der the tongue of society and conveyed
from one city to another orally that
the press would not stoop to publish.
If the ministers will take care of
their own fiocks and leave the press
alone, they will be engaged in a far
more laudable undertaking.
Gas a rule there is nothing more
wearing on a man than a. lawsuit
Elk.
To my friends, the widows: Mourn
ing paper is q. satire in itself. It means.
says the Boston Transcript, the deepest
possible margin for the first six
months, say. Then it grows a little
narrower. Is that sign that you are
not mourning as much as you were the
first half year? Next year it is mar
rover still. The grief is greatly miti-
gated. The third year it is a mere
streak. Your sorrow does not amount
to much nowl The next year the black
border has entirely disappeared. Does
that mean that you have forgotten
your bereavement? That would be the
logical Interpretation, and yet in the
case of how many whose stationery
has gone through this diminishing per-
spective to the vanishing point the sor-
row has been even more bitter after
years perhaps than it was at first.
1t is now generally conceded that it
was newspaper man who invented
the story that tan-colored shoes would
be worn during the winter.
4 CIINSdAlu6II1uInS
inches in diameter has struck the
Berry Walls of Salt Lake. 1 discov-
cred a handsome young bank clerk
propelling a six-incher through the
streets the other evening. It reminded
me of the story lately told in Puck, in
which the little girl marvelled greatly
that her gentlemen acquaintance
should carry a patch of cold slaw'' on
their shoulders.
He hung up curtains all the day,
With whistle and with song,
And when his wife came home at night
She said they were all wrong.
Vogue.
winter fair will all take in Chinatown,
of course. not knowing that within a
block of the fashionable dry goods
stores there is a San Francisco China
town in miniature, right here in Salt
Lake. l use the word miniature ad-
visedly, for the street that I refer to
is but a few rods long. It extends
from Commercial avenue to Second
South. On that street is the famous
Oriental building, in which a word of
English is scarcely heard from one
years end to another unless it comes
from the lips Of a heather or white
OPIUM nend.
A stroll down that thoroughfare
after night fall is full of surprises for
those who never venture off the more
frequented streets. 1.-The street is
quiet now, however, said a policeman
to me the other evening, Ito what it
was a year or more ago. A large
number of the heathens have either
returned to China or have sought
more profitable quarters elsewhere.
Opium joints are numerous, but it
is the hardest kind of work to locate
them. A s'fend' can usually spot
one at first sight and obtain entree.
but brass buttons and blue clothes
have a very. peculiar effect upon the
Chinese. AS one of the heather lately
expressed, Just as soon see the deb
bel any day and alice time. :" AS long
as opium smoking is confined TO the
Chinese, it would be almost foolish on
the part of the police to interfere It
is as much part of the daily life of