Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1893-02-02

delphia Record.
THE ascent of the balloon is gen.
orally soar point with the aeronaut.
-Blnghamton Leader.
A NEW broom sweeps clean; 50
will an old one In the hands OF new
ianitor. -Union-Standard.
THE merchant finds that his hard
est work begins when everything Is
dun. Chicago Inter Ocean.
THE Greeks solved the theater-hat
nuisance by not allowing the women
to 90 to the theater.-Detrolt Jour-
nal.
SOME claim that the counterpart
| in the opposite sex OF the grass widow
should be designated the hay rake
Philadelphia Times.
Have yez an almanac,
Moike?" Mike-"I have not" Pat
"Then well have to take the weather
as it comes. Truth.
ToMMY-"What's the turkey strut
ting around that way for?" Jimmy
-"Guess he's trying to look tough.
Indianapolis Journal.
BY adding few medical properties
to the mucilage the Columbian stamp
might be utilized to crush the porous
plaster trust. Washington Post.
JALEBY-I don't see why Smith
calls Miss Harper's conversation in
toxicating. Felton, suppose be-
cause it's extra dry. Chicago Inter
Ocean.
JINKs-Gallon was dead to the
world last night. Filkins-Did ne
have a storied urn? Jinks-No; just
! an animated bust Fields wash
: ington.
REGeIE-"van Harding has been
expelled from the club" Ferdie-
sWhy?p Reggie-"He was gettin1
too beastly bwainy. New York
Herald.
Tos1MY-"Say, paw?p Mr.. Figg-
@Well?" Tommy-"When a hole IN
. the ground is filled up with dirt what
becomes of the acknowledgements
) Journal.
i "YoU were out again playing poker
Q last night" said the father mo,
! father" replied the truthful young
a man, 81 was in just $17."-Washing'
ton Star.
o NEvERGo-"Tmw willing to wait one
n hundred years to gain your love-
u Miss Tiredtodeath-"It seems to me
= the time must be almost up."-De
troit Tribune.
SHE-Dudes haven't more than
half sense. Mr.. Sappy-Aw, Miss
Navy, are there no exceptions? ION,
yes, Mr.. Sappy; some haven't any. =
Brooklyn Life.
@I HAVE discovered way to cure
cockneys of pronouncing horse as II
II, were orse" "How?" spell il
orse. Then they'll be sure to say
horse. Puck
THERE is no end to New York;
jealousy of Chicago. street Cal
conductor Of Gotham even refused
to accept Columbian half-dollar al
its face value.-Pittsburg Dispatch
"DoEs your husband pet you?
asked Mrs. McCorkle Of Mrs. Nc
Crackle. "Oh, yes" was the reply
awhen he's drunk" "How nice
must be to be petted all the time. =
Truth.
- "WHAT do you mean by thrsshin
ice your boy without provocation?
ny. aWell, you see, busy man like m
&C must discipline his children when b
fg- happens to have time. "-Eliegend
GU Batter.
"JoHN," said Mrs. Norton, as sh
seated herself at the hotel breakfas
table, did you call waiter?" "Yes
or said Norton, looking up from his pi
AN per. al called him and he had ira
re- full. Life.
Urn sDoN'T you think you are overdoir
lm this matter of delay?" said the cree
Tea itor. Not at all, /" replied the debto
lau "but am satisfied that your part
10 the transaction is decidedly owe
irsC dun. "-Washington Star.
the YOUNG HUsBAND-What! You al
tut 25 years old to-day? Why, you to
ex- me a year ago, just before q
,nly wedding, that you were only
zap Young Wife-(wearily)-I have ag'
ess rapidly since 1 married. Life
had HE-"You don't mean to tell 4
ain, YOU are going to marry that old, bal
ton headed professor?" She-"He
The rather bald, but think how ma
be- Young men OF to-day are bald on t
; at inside of their heads. Truth.
ON EprToR-You say you want
here check for some jokes you loft h'
ling two weeks ago? Why, those joi
self, have been paid for. Mr.. Chestnut
nth, How long ago, sir? "Oh, about d
ook. or hundred years, l imagine
De- Life.
,roN- BRowN-There were some thil
lster i'm which the ancients surpassed
ms moderns. Dunn-What, for
on stance? Brown-Noah was bet
na1 weather-prophet than the fello
ou.u who make the predictions nevada
y ~ - Puck.
60" HEADING HIM OFF: Gildersle
Ia -"When are you going to propose
~ he the wealthy Miss Munn?" Tillingh
~. Never. Gildersleeve-"Wh
|, 10 the trouble?" Tillinghast-"W
rrD she sent me as a Christmas gif
own book entitled Don" -Christl
ases Puck.
gem MAGAZINE OFFICE BoY-"Oh, the
18th been an awful time up in the edi
rush ial room to-day" Business Mana
him -@Eh! what's the trouble?" o
out Boy-"The janitor made mist
ID TO and put the M Admittance' sig
ID he the subscription Office and the y