Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1893-07-15
PITH AND POINT.

have not yet announced whether the
dog star is a skye terrier. Judge.
The bee that's so busy
His time now employs
In storing mp honey
And chasing small boys.
Washington Star
Young Author-'eDon't you like to
see yourself in print?' Dehutante-
''No; l prefer silk. New York Jour
nal.
Belle-"Would You call Blanche a
beauty?" Jack-"Not unless thought
she was likely to overhear me. Kate
Fields Washington.
These are the days when the cry is
Dress Reform" and it must be ad-
mitted that much reform needs dress
ing.--Lowell Courier
When nature wants to be disagree
able she is ingenious about it. Mud
turns the black shoe yellow, and the
yellow shoe black Puck.
"Well, my boy, how do you find
YOURSELF" 81 don't, =" responded the
detective with an air of offended dig.
nifty. indianapolis journal.
No matter how well he may have
lived, when man reaches 100 years
he knows that his life has come to
uaught. Chicago Inter Ocean.
81 had three invitations to lunch
to-day, said Oscar. (Which did you
accept?" asked his mother. CAL, "
returned Oscar proudly .-Judge,
He kept little shaving shop,
No barber, though. was he,
He shaved the notes that came his way
From A clean down to z.
Detroit Free Press.
Mrs. Byers-''All ths big berries
are at the top of this box, I SUPPOSE
Tom Carter-"Oh, no, mum; some NV
EN- are on top Nv the other boxes. -
Puck.
To be able to maintain all even tenn
per is considered great achievement !;
yet man who is mad all the time
comes under this head. Rochester
Post-Express.
Edythe (playfully)--''Ho dare you
steal kiss from me, sir? Don't you
know it is petty larceny?' Jack Ten
thusiastically)--'1 call it grand lar
ceny. Brooklyn Life.
II never saw man SO happy as
Dicky Billings is over the loss of his
wife's fortune" Happy" eyes.
Dicky says he is now able to kick about
things at home. Brooklyn Life.
The gorgeous sunset on the sky
A brilliant scene is Inning,
The small boy surreptitiously
Departs to go in swimming.
Detroit Tribune.
Little pug dogs are now being
taught to wear the curl of their tails
down instead of up. The coil i'm
pinges on the ground and serves to
take up the recoil of the bark. Mime
apolis Journal.
First Annex Darling why did
you become engaged to him if you
didn't love him." Second Ditto -
cts merely little way of my own for
seeing the baseball games, my dear. ="
Harvard Lampoon.
"Do you think, young man, that
you could give my daughter all she
asks for?" questioned papa, grimly.
"I-aw-think so, sir. murmured the
lover, bashfully. "She says she wants
only me. Boston Globe
Tender Lover" Fan, are you never
going to care anything for me?"
Arizona Maiden-'Tm afraid not,
George. / can't cough up no affection
fur man that dassent tackle a buckin
broncho. Chicago Tribune
81 never realized until to-day how
terrible poverty must be- said Mrs.
Dollargilt to her husband. "And how
did you realize ito" 81 couldn't
find enough change to bride the hand
organ man to go away. Industries.
"Have you any Gretna greens?" in
CURED the facetious customer with u
basket on his arm. mo SIR" an
swered the grocer; nearest / can
come to 'em is parlor matches Any
body waiting on you, ma'am? Chi
csgo Tribune.
Mrs Carper- Eyes, my daughter
was crazy to get married and she mar
ried man who has failed in every
thing he has undertaken. Mrs. Rox
Whose husband failed for a million) -
Gracious! They must be immensely
rich. New York Press.
The Heiress-"Why do you wish to
marry me?" The Impecunious-"Y ou
wish me to answer honestly?" The
H-"Yes." The /. Without con-
cealment or prevaricaiion?" The H.
Yes The l. because want YOU
to be my wife. New York Press.
Indignant Mother Clara, I have
told you repeatedly that didn't want
you to have anything to do with that
young Hankinson !" Miss Clara.
Mamma, all I've had to do with him
has been three soda-waters and one
chocolate ice-cream. Chicago Tri-
bune