The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1893-12-03
BRAINY CHINESE MONKEYS.
The Talking Chimpanzees Must Take
n Back Seat.
Raltimore Sun.

Apropos OF the enterprising American
philolosfst who is reported to have Just
reached London from Africa with two
English or which have taught him &c speak
chimpanZee, and which will probably turn
out to be as genuine as some OF the human
curios of the Midway P~laisance. is a story
Of simian intelligence reported in the North
China Herald, which Is evidently a journal
of the most sensitive veracity, and which
nothing could induce to misrepresent the
facts:
DIR. MACEDONIAN, an American. who lives
at Tien-tsin, has lately returned from the
Great Wall. where he learned of a race OF
Manchurian monkeys inhabiting the noun
tain regions of the Great Wall who show
astonishing progress In the art or pottery
and wine-making. A recent edition OF the
official history OF Yungping states that
lately a large body of immigrating monkeys
passed a certain town in crossing from one
mountain to another. The boys OF the vii
lage clapped their. hands and shouted at the
monkeys, which becoming frightened, fled,
taking their young in their arms. but drop
ping in their flight a number of earthen
vessels, some of which hold a quart. The
villagers found they contained two kinds
of wine, a pink and a green, that had been
made from mountain berries. The monkeys
store this liquor for use in the winter when
the water is all frozen. DIR. MACEDONIAN
adds that the chronicler cites an author
who affirms that in Sc Chuen there are
monkeys who manufacture wine, and gives
the following anecdote in evidence: A party
of villagers who desired to try the quality
of the monkey wine. placed, unobServed, a
great feast near the monkeys caves and
then hid themselves. on discovering the
food the monkeys went to their caves and
brought out their liquor, without which the
feast could not be enjoyed. AT that mo-
ment the villagers rushed out of their hid
ing place and the monkeys forthwith scam
pered off, leaving the wine, with which the
villagers made themselves merry"
No one will doubt the good faith OF the
North China Herald or the absolute truth
fulness of DR. MACEDONIAN. The story mere
ly proves that the Chinese monkeys are
considerably higher than the African mon
keys in the scale of civilization. The Chin
panzees which the American professor has
brought to London possess at best only the
which is nothing but a trick OF the tongue,
after all. requiring more intelligence to alb
nese monkeys are wiser, deeper customers
than these chattering Africans. The Sc
Chuens don't waste their time talking into
monographs for the benefit of wandering
Willies. Life is too short and its opportu-
mites too precious for that. They devote
themselves to acts, not words; TO the good
Hudson's ghostly crew encountered by Rip
Van Wrinkle in the Catskills, they take
their liquor with a silent and solemn JOY
that is too full and deep for utterance.
The only points in which they show their
inferiority to civilized human beings is in
their willingness to abandon their demi-
first instance related bv Mr. MacGovan-
and in their being frightened away from
their wine when they were about TO BEGIN
their feast, in the second case. No civil
lized topper would have surrendered his
dram under these circumstances. Still, the
Chinese monkeys how wonderful progress
and aptitude for the requirements of civil
lization and with a few further opportu-
mites for intercourse with Americans will
soon learn to remedy the defects and
weaknesses noted in their character. Suffi-
cient has been said to show that they are
already far in advance of the parrot-like
monkey of Africa, which is not in the race
with the Chinese simian philosophers who
carry h~alf-gallon bottles in their hip pock-
cts as their customary tipple, and who
drink wine instead of water the whole
winter long. The Chinese monkey may not
be much for talking, but he means business
all the time. MAN, being reasonable,
must get drunk says Byron. Why not
monkeys?