The Somerset reporter., 1893-05-18
A GOLD BRICK TRICK.
IN THE ASSAY OFFICE THE PEOPLE
HAD LOADS OF FUN.
An Interesting and Mirth Producing En-
counter OF an Innocent Looking Jay
hawkcr with IA Lot of Exceedingly Smart
Bank Clerks Who Knew 1t All.

What jay he looked! The hayseed
was dropping out of his pockets, and his
unkempt whiskers were sporting with
the wind as he marched into the United
States assay office in Wall street and de-
posted upon desk a big carpet bag,
which he set down with resounding
bang All the clerks stood around and
grinned 1t was the old story
Mr. Assay Man" he said, Il have
here a gold brick that p
But he was interrupted with roar of
laughter A young man in a corner
nearly rolled on the floor with merri-
ment. A bankers clerk who had come
III to inquire about a gold shipment gig
gled till he was crimson.
Sucker born every minute" he said
Same old yarn. You jayhawkers
wouldn't get taken in so often if you
read the papers. Oh, Lord, what fool
you must BET
The old man looked puzzled. IF you
will kindly talk English he remarked.
'you and will be able to understand
each other better What do you mean
by calling me fool?"
Precisely what | say" spoke up the
bankers clerk You've been taken in
by the gold brick swindle."
"Swindle. eh?
Yes. swindle You met man from
California, didn't you, who had gold
brick tied up i'll red handkerchief and
an Indian with him? Man said the brick
was worth $4,000 and he'd sell it for
5000. didn't lNs'
He did"
"Oh, what lark!" laughed the bank
on a broad gKn at the mystiication of
the jayhawker 'The Californian said
the Indian knew where there were lot
more gold bricks and they've gone to get
them And then they sold you lump
of lead covered with gold paint that is
worth about 81 Co. and you've come down
here to the United States assay office to
have the lead analysed and get told what
a monkey you've made of yourself" And
every one howled with mirth.
Not so fast. young man." objected
the jayhawker. "You were right about
the Californian and the redskin selling
me the gold brick, but there your infor-
nation ceased. Tain't no bit of lead they
worked off onm hada chip of it ana
lyzed. No, sir want born yesterday.
if am from the country"
You had it assayedr burst out the
bankers clerk, almost exploding with
the intensity of his grin. you knocked
a corner off the brick, and then they
changed it on you, substituting piece
of real gold cut from a IS goldpiece.
That of course was found to be all right
and they landed you like an old guy.
high and dry" Laughter.
mo, they didn't" protested the jay
hawker. I've got the genuine thing.
III bet you 5000 It's real gold brick. y
And he pulled out the sum of money
named and threw it on the table
There were cries of Don't take the
poor old chump's money. He's been don
once, and, faint fair to bet on q sur,
thing" The jayhawker, however, pro
tested
I'm rich" he said. I've got lot
more money I'm going to spend on gold
bricks, and if any one can fool me want
to know it. I'd like to take flier on it
anyway
The bankers clerk hardly liked to
cheat the Jayhawker, but all the rest said
that the lesson would be worth $500 to
the old fellow
I'll make the bet without looking at
the brick, said the bankers clerk. 1.-THE
terms of it are that you've been fooled
and that you've bought lump Of lead
or something. Money talks. Here's
mine. and he threw $500 on the table.
There were some moral scruples in the
minds of the crowd about doing" the
old man up in that way, but the major
ity view was that he deserved it for be
ing SO fresh.
The money being deposited, the jay
hawker slowly unpacked his carpet bag
in the presence of broad grin. There
were derisive cheers as he took the gold
brick from the many coverings he had
wound around it and handed it to the as
sayer
mat ofhclal accepted It, and look OF
amazement came over his face,
gentlemen, ne sald, this Drlck Will
not need any assaying 1t was made in
this building, and it has the government
stamp upon 1t. 1t is worth 5000
The Jayhawker reached for the stake
money and transferred 1t to his pocket,
The grin on the face OF the know 1t all
clerk changed to an expression OF pam