davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
PROF. BUMPS MISTAKE.
Or Rather, 1t Wasn't a Mistake. But Just a
BIunder.

"a bright young phrenOlogist who
lately returned from travelling tour
through the southern portion of the
state met me on the street and said he
had tale of woe to pour into my ear.
His stories are always interesting, so
l was glad of the opportunity.
IL was doing a rushing business
down in the town of L he said,
and the money was rushing in through
the door in stream | was giving
readings and telling people the work
that they were especially designed for
by Providence. One evening there
was a large crowd in the hall, and
was getting along swimmingly. | had
made a number of satisfactory tests,
and the people had been jollied up to
fitting state, when L made my usual
proposition to select two young men
from the audience, discover their char
acteristics, and then select two women
who might be present who would be
mated to them by their similar eharac-
teristics.
The young men came to the plat
form, and l carefully went over their
ncduS. lou KNOW tHeTc II really u
great deal in this thing; the world
thinks it fraud, but there is really a
great amount of truth in it. | had
examined the heads of the young men,
and | then went through the audience
for the purpose of picking out the
women who would be mated to them by
their characteristics. picked out two
pretty girls finally, and declared that
they would be the proper ones. What
the devil do you think happened?
They were both married. and their
husbands were in the hall. The young
men whom | had selected had been
mixed up in scandal with those same
two married women. and there was an
awful row. Great Scott. | got out OF
the place that night-went in such a
hurry that didn't even stop to pay the
rent for the hall"-N. y. Recorder.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30

visitors are awaiting this move, and
when the reductions are made there
will in all probability be great rush
| to our city.
The financial report for the month of
May shows a profit of nearly quarter
of million dollars, which is far in eX-
cess of all expectations and very en-
couraging to heavy stockholders. Dur
ing the rest OF the season the expenses
of running the fair will be greatly
lightened. and with the increasing re-
ceipts will place the mammoth enter
prise on very substantial footing. The
average daily attendance is now very
close to the observation-disclosures
mark and gaining steadily.
Those of the foreign countries whose
exhibits have been delayed by accidents
at sea are now on the ground and are
furnishing some rare surprises by the
magniicence of their displays. The
Russians among others are distinguish
ing themselves in their section in the
Manufactures and Liberal Arts build
ing. their arrival all but completing
the grand central avenue in that
leviathan of buildings. Germany,
France and many other nations have
been in place for some time and are
dividing among them the wonder and
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
GO INTO THE GALLERIES.
People Who DO Not Climb the Stairs Miss
Many Fine Exhibits.


Up to the present time it has ap-
peared as if there was some danger that
in the immensely of space that the
sightseer has to cover at the fair, the
galleries of the big buildings would be
neglected. Since the crowds have be-
gun to arrive and the attendance has
run up to the hundred thousand mark,
people have found out that there is
much to be seen above ground, and
have climbed the stairs in search of new
marvels with as much energy as they
have displayed in going from one build
ing to another.
Still exhibitors in the galleries are in
clined to complain that the masses pass
them by, and ask for better means of
transportation from the floors to the
galleries. They suggest signs pointing
out the way and stating what can be
found above. The chief of the trans
portation department has promised his
exhibitors more elevators and the ad-
Gitional attraction of a band on wet
afternoons.
These people who hurry through a
building without diverging from the
main avenue on the floor make great
mistake. In the assignment of space it
was impossible to place all the best ex-
hibits in the most prominent parts of
the buildings, and in most OF the ex-
hibit halls as much can be seen by TAX
ing side aisle or walking through the
gallery, as in the crush of visitors on
the main avenues. Especially is this
true in the Transportation building,
where the whole of the bicycle exhibit
is installed in the gallery, and a vast
number of models of engineering works
and curious examples of boats and car
riages can be found.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
admiration of the visiting hosts eacl

day.
A great many people Genre to visit the
fair who expect to do the x hole thing
up in a few days, or week at most.
These invariably go away unsatisfied
or conclude that their business else
where is not so pressing as they at first
thought it was. After spending a
whole day in one corner of one of the
vast buildings they begin to realize the
magnitude of their task and resolve to
forego a minute inspection of the exhib-
its, unless they can arrange for a
lengthy stay, and bestir themselves to
get over as much ground as possible,
contenting themselves with only a
cursory glance at objects of superior
interest while on the wing.
There is one portion of the fair, how
ever, that sticks them. That is Mid
way Plaisance. In spite of all their
plans they find it an utter impossibility
to get through that marvellous aggrega-
ton of wonders on schedule time. Its
attractions are all too potent for the
strength of their resolutions and they
linger in spite of themselves amidst the
destinations of the kaleidoscope thor
oughfare.
In this connection it might be well to
impart a little advice, which is con-
tanned in the words of an honest old
lady from the back districts, who,
when her filial spouse was departing
| for a DAY a. the fair said: Now, Hiram,
you'd better leave what money you
don't need with me-" AS the story has
it Hiram left the bulk of his cash with
mother" aad he was sorry for it when
he struck Midway Plaisance.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30

week or ten days there were grand re-
ceptions, public and private, and cere-
monial visits to the fair grounds, and
altogether perfectly delightful season
was enjoyed by those of the upper ten
dom who were privileged to participate
in the festivities Then Infanta Eu-
Ialia burst upon our social horizon in all
her regal splendor and society had an
other round of hobnobbing with roy
atty. The elite of the city reveled for
a brief season in the smiles of their
titled guests and fairly jcstled one an
other in their efforts to get nearest to
the fair princess. But 1t is all over and
we are compelled to fall back upon the
lesser lights from abroad, who were for
the time thrown in the shade by the
brighter luminaries of more exalted sta
ton
The duke and princess having taken
their departure from our city, we can
give our eyes a moments rest and then
lock about US upon the palmer but
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
MONEY IN A ScAlPED HEAD.
A Nebraska Man Who VIII BE Well Paid
for Exhibiting at the Fair.

A Nebraska Man Who VIII BE Well Paid
for Exhibiting ut the Fair.
A. W. Edwards, of Elk Creek, Neb.,
is regarded by the Omaha Bee as the
luckiest man that ever lost his scalp.
a teamster in a wagon train going from
Nebraska City to Fort Laramie to take
supplies to the fort. He was then a
youth of sixteen. When near Fort
Laramie the train separated, about
twenty wagons going to the fort and
the remainder of the train going to
other points west. Young Edwards
was with those going to the fort, and
when within less than two miles of
their destination they were surprised
by the Indians. Wholly unprepared
for the attack, it was an easy matter
for the Indians to kill the men and
plumber the train. Edwards was using
his revolver to the best advantage when
an arrow struck his arm, and, passing
through the flesh, stuck fast in his side.
At the same time his pony was shot and
fell upon him, and an Indian took his
scalp. Inconsistencies then followed.
When consciousness returned he found
himself living On the ground face down.
ward and the pony lying upon him. He
raised his head and looked around.
Another man was lying near him, with
the blood still flowing from his scalp
less head. He wondered if his head was
in the same condition He had little
time to ascertain, for, hearing the In
dams coming back, he resolved to feign
death. Burying his face in the dirt he
remained motionless. The Indians
came up and rolled the pony off him
and. to make sure that he was dead,
thrust an arrow into each heel. As he
remained perfectly motionless they
tention of the soldiers at the fort and
they came to the rescue, but not until
every man in the caravan was stretched
upon the prairie and the wagons plum
dered.
Young Edwards was found to be the
only survivor. He was taken to the
fort, and, after n severe illness of six
farm ut Elk Creek, Neb., with his wife
and five children. He is to go to the
worlds fair to show the people of the
whole world the only living man that
has had his scalp taken by the Indians,
and for this he is to receive ten thousand
dollars and his expenses during the
fair. He is an excellent talller and will
be able to tell his story well and answer
the numerous questions that will be
asked him. Ten thousand dollars
seems good price for scalp-locll, but
there are few people who would take
the risk or have the nerve to feign
death in such trying ordeal even for
ten thousand dollars.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
THE GUARD is WORSTEO.
Mr.. Trotter Asks a Question and Is
Brought Up Sharp.
"Can this be love?"

"Can this be love?''
Tenderly gazing down into the limpid
eyes of Agatha Swoggles, whose fluffy
bang rose and fell regularly on her
throbbing temples, Vernon Trotter
asked himself this question while he
took clandestine hitch at his suspend
ers.
About the couple lay the strange viii
lagos of the Midway Plaisance, simmer
ing in the moonlight. Low songs of night
birds came to their ears in dreamy ca
dences, mellowed by distance and the
warm night wind which greatly stirred
the leaves above their heads. Happy
in sweet soul communion, Agatha and
Vernon gave no thought to their en-
vironments nor to the depressing fact
that the morrow would bring toll,
wheat cakes and bad Sixty-third street
coffee. A long-drawn sigh was the
only answer from Che girl to the muir
INJURED query of her idol.
Words could not express the sweet
restfulness which overflowed her heart
as she trustingly burrowed her little
head into his shirt front. No word es-
capped her lips and for some moments
the youth gazed at her with eyes in
which the love lights shone, straining
his ears to catch sound. But his ears
stood the strain and returned to their
normal position, for the girl spoke not.
An awful fear beset the heart of Yer
non. causing him to start and gasp,
while he clasped still closer to him the
beloved burden within his arms Could
it be, he thought. that he had been mis-
taken? No, that could not be, for he
was Columbian guard. Why, then,
this silence which echoed across tie
Plaisance and died away into the sum-
mer night? Again the youth leaned
down close to her face-so close that
her face-powder made delicate tracery
upon his ear. Gazing into her eyes, he
said again: ''Can this be love?"
At this the young girl started. A
CLEAN shot into her eyes, lighting up
the darkness for eleven feet around,
and she said: well. it seems to that if
had been monkeying around as long
as you have I'd know whether it was or
not, without asking any foolish ques
tions. Chicago News.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
A PardonabIe Ofense.

When Columbian guards do wrong
they have to write a full explanation
of their wrong doing on formidable
paper bearing printed questions that
are designed to extort the truth from
the erring Columbian. When one of
them sat down while on duty one
dreary night recently he was discov-
cred in his heinous offense and was duly
given the printed blank and ordered to
tell his shame in ink. The questions TO
be answered read:
What was the nature of the Of
fense?''
The guard wrote
''Settin' down"
What was the causeT'
Tired" wrote the culprit.
''Haye you any explanation to offer?''
said the merciless blank.
"Hevvy body, small feat" was the
triumphant answer.
Naive and to the point, to say :ue
least of it
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
FACT ABOUT FLIES.
The Best Way to Get Rid OF Them L. to
Starye Them.

mo, thank you, my dear; l do not
want any fly papers or hy traps about
nv house. | learned a great many
wears ago that the more things we have
to call flies the more will come. In the
neighborhood where flies were simply
a nuisance | lived almost unmoleSted
by them because | never permitted a
particle of stale food to accumulate
about the premises.
Files. like good many other things,
will never stay where they are in dam
ger of starvation, and never kept any
thing about the place to feed them
with, not even fly paper. Everything
that could not be burned was carried
as far from the house as possible ana
buried. All garbage is valuable as
fertilizer, and utilize it as such.
1T is my opinion that every form OF
fly paper, fly poison, and trap which
is baited with any substance is just so
much inducement for them to- stay
around the house. They think-if flies
can think at all-that they are going 20
get something to eat aud therefore
hang around. The best fly preventive
is starvation. Chicago Tines.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30

more satisfying celebrities of our own
country. Within few days past
among the visitors at the White City
were noted ex-President Harrison.
Vice President Stevenson, Senator
David b. Hill and a number of other
prominent figures in political and
business circles, and they all pro-
nounced our great exhibition a YER
liable city of wonders. 1t is sail that
Mr.. Harrison remarked in private that
he would sooner visit the fair than GO
duck shooting. Knowing the ex-presi-
.5snt's great love for his favorite pas
time, we may believe that he thinks the
fair is well worth seeing.
Having recovered from the thorough
-dampening received during the recent
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
GOING TO THE FAIR.

With a pocket full of money
And gripsack full of clothes,
And with kodak loaded
For most anything that shows
And with enthusiasm
That is way beyond compare.
I'm going to Chicago
To be Tin it, at the fair.
I'll gaze on greater wonders
Than were ever dreamt before,
The world in past and present
am going TO explore.
And all its rarest treasures
VIII appear before my eyes,
Which were, wish, as many
AS are given to the flies.
Among the strangest people
In their native streets I'll go
fMong dwarfs from darkest Africa
And frozen Esquimaux:
Like in the ancient fairy tales
III visit every land
''From Greenland's icy mountains
To India's coral strand"
I'll gain so much of knowledge
That forever will be
A bright encyclopedia
In high society:
And folks Will crowd around me
When there's silver in my hair
To listen TO the story
OF Chicago and her fair.
What care for the trouble
Or discomfort c. expense
When fifty million dollars worth
I'll see for fifty cents;
To miss that biggest thing on earth
Would be a lasting crime
lam going TO Chicago
II il takes my bottom dime.
The railroad trains are crowded
And the ocean ships are crammed:
The highways are with carriages
And bicycles all damned:
The lakes, canals and rivers
Haven't any room TO spare
For all the world is going
To Chicago and her fair.
At least a million pocketbooRS
Brimmcd full of ready cash,
Two million Saratoga trunks
For baggagemen to smash.
And countless bullying gripsacks
Packed with the greatest care,
Are going to Chicago
To boom along the fair.
HoO-ray. then. for ColumbuSl
Three tigers for his fart
I'm going to Chicago
If must use Shank S mare;
III feast my eyes on wonders,
With knowledge ill my brain,
And proud III tell the story
When l am home again.
H. c. Dodge, in GoOdail's SUI
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
JACKSON PARK JOTTINGS.
The Tide of Events Transpiring at
the Worlds Fair.
Chicago's Royal Guests Celebrities Wis
ffing the Great ExpOsition-A Strange
AIingIing of Nations
New Features.
Tsreclal Chicago Corrcspondence I

The worlds fair city has for the last
few weeks had somewhat of surfeit of
royalty. The city was thrown into
a tumult by the arrival of Duke de
Veragua and his suite. and laid itself
out to entertain the titled descendant
of Columbus in truly royal fashion. For
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30

TIE strength of the ant is prodigious.
And there is the bat; what wonderful
strength has the bat Think how many
men can go on one Of them.-El1ira Gazette.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30

They amputated his leg after all,
EN-? What made the doctors wait so
long?" .'Judgin' from their bills, it
must have been to give 'em a chance t.
pull it before they took it off. "-6uffalt,
Courier.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30
4 Tired Little Bow.

Little Boy-I'm tired to death
Mother-Doing what?
Little Boy--Thinking about the things
You told me to do and / forgot.-Good
News
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30

A Boys Definition--Master-
"What is an opossum?" Scholarly
small animal with a pouch" Master
What does he do with it," Scholar
when he is hunted he gets inside
OuiDS
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-06-30

Had Mr.. Cleveland made the presi-
dent OF a colossal railroad system his
political spokesman AID manager 1T
Chicago last summer he would not have
strengthened his cause before the peo-
pie. Had the democratic party no:ni-
mated for vice president an uxOrious
millionaire who had antagonized the
labor element of the country by super
cilious affronts, its intrepidity would
have exceeded its discretion. Declare
tions of policy delivered by gentlemen
who step in evening dress from patri-
elan banquets to the porticos OF palaces
may be profound and patriotic, but they
do not thrill the bosoms of the plebe-
ians, the common herd who eat their
dinner from a tin pail at noon and live
in tenement houses in the cities and
dug-outs on the prairies- As Gen. Bos-
quet said of the charge of the Six Hun
dred at Balaklava: This is brilliant
but it is not war;"
The constructive period of the nation
has passed. The epoch is closed. The
constitution is the supreme law. Slav-
cry, state sovereignty and the other
disturbing issues of our formatory and
preliminary era are extinct. We have
no foreign complications, no policies
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1893-04-03
GREAT BICYCLE TOURNAMENT.
A Week of Wheeling at Chicago During
the Worlds Fair.

CHICAGO, April 3.-August to II an in
ternational cycling tournament will be
held at this city. A track will be construct
ed costing as estimated s. 800. The surface
will be gravel peculiar to the Joliet dis
trict in this state. All the countries that
have amateur organizations, except Belgium
and Germany have named delegates to
the International Cyclists association
England will pick her team from the re-
suits of the spring meets in that country,
and owing to the fact that her representa-
tives will therefore be delayed IL reaching
this country the races for the international
championships will be run on the last days
of the great meet-August II and 12
Beautiful Challenge Trophy.
The prize for the international races is
the gift of Henry l.. Saltonstall. 1t is Ia
sterling silver cup, gold lined, and stands
twenty-eight inches high on a six-inch eb-
ony base. The figure of Fame standing
upon globe surmounts the lid. The heads
of Bacchus and Mercury adorn the arms
of the urn, under which are American
eagles The L. A. w. Inblem is engraved
upon the back. The cup will be perpet-
ual challenge trophy, and the conditions
under which it will be competed for will
be determined upon by the racing board
of the league.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1893-04-03
Fatal Boiler EXPLOSION.

lNDIANoLA, Ia, April 3.-A boiler ex-
plosion occurred in saw-mill near Tacoma,
twenty miles from Mere, in Warren county,
yesterday afternoon Four persons were
killed. The dead are: Henry McKinness,
aged -, owner of the mill: John McKinness,
aged 10; Henry Mckinness, aged %;
Peter Mckinness, aged II. The boiler
was an old affair that had been in use many
years in the mill. The body of Henry Nc
kinness was found lying far from the mill
torn to pieces. One foot was buried in his
skull. The other foot was found nearly
twenty-five feet from his head The clothes
were torn and it was almost impossible to
gather together all the fragments of the
BODY
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1893-04-03
MURDER FOR LOVE.
a Shocking Tragedy Ends Two
Young Lives.
FAIR GIRL STUDENT SHOT TO DEATH

BY the Hand of the Man who Said H Loved
Her-A Cold-BIooded and Premeditated
Crime-Aneged Love That Is a Libel on
True Anfection-The Criminal Attempts
Retribution by Ending His Own Life
Evanston, Ills, the Scene.
CHICAGO, April 3.-The cowardly miscre-
ant who thinks a desire to possess or a
will to murder is evidence of love has again
given the press a startling tragedy to re-
count Thousands of curious men and
women passed and repassed the little
brown cottage in Evanston yesterday,
where the night previous was enacted a
most dastardly crime. All day long
passers-by gazed at the house and sought
traces of the occurrence of Saturday night
when T., Ross Smith shot Ellie Clark and
then turned his weapon upon himself, in
1icting wound inihis temple from the eff
fects of which he died yesterday morning
in the Evanston police station. But all
traces of the murder and suicide had b, N
removed. The ground in front of the
house upon which Miss Clark fell had been
swept clean.
One Deadly Bullet Found.
The board sidewalk on which Smiths
life blood had flowed had been scrubbed
during the night and the two boards from
which it had been impossible to efface the
stains We're torn up and removed. The
only thing discovered was the bullet which
is supposed to have perforated Miss Clark
body and fallen to the ground This was
found lying in the dust by John Camp and
was given to Rev. J. f. WATSON, of 712
Ayers court. in front of whose residence
the tragedy was enacted.
Threat Against Miss Alternately.
The murder and suicide was the most
Lulu Alternately, the only eye witness to
the shooting. was confined to her bed at
the home of Mrs. Allan Vane, corner of
Sheridan road and Davis street She was
Frustrated by the event. She was Miss
Clark's companion and faithful friend, and
in her it is said Miss Clark had one who
may yet die like Ellie, for man whom
she scarcely knew had become infatuated
with MissLulu. it is said. and had tried to
induce Miss Alternately to marry him.
Failing in this the man stated that he
would give her five years in which o con-
sent to marry her, and if at the end of five
years she still refused he would kill her.
Loves Course Doesn't Run smooth.
Miss Clark went to Evanston from Spo-
kane Falls in September. entering the
freshman class at the Northwestern uni
versity. She had met Smith at an academy
at Spokane Falls, and at the age of 10 be-
came engaged to him. Her father, how
ever, saw in young Smith the son of a
wealthy man without trade or profession,
, and on this account together with his
daughters age, objected to the engage
ment. To separate the couple and wean
the young woman's affect ions the girl was
sent east.