The herald., 1893-08-27
ONE DAYS FISHING.

ike . blooming IDIOT" said the ma
jor, II agreed TO take the colonel fishing.
'sWell, the next afternoon, which was
Saturday, he came around with fish,
ing rod that gave him, and when / got
into the cab blame me If he didn't have
. trunk. Got my things in that said
he, and may eternally fry if there
weren't things enough in that trunk to
stock pawnshop. BY ged, he had every
thing from evening clothes to a patent
bootjack. But he hasn't them any more, "
and the major chuckled.
1--WE started for Mud Run, out in
Pennsylvania. I'd never been there be-
fore, but a mar told me there was good
fishing there. He was liar, by the way.
about the time we got started the
colonel wanted to smoke, and by the
hind hobs of Gehenna if he hadn't
packed all the cigars in that bloody
trunk. When I cussed, he tried to get
up in the baggage car and was nearly
killed. Then te got some bad cigars
from the porter and growled for an hour
steady. Pretty soon he wanted a drink,
and the whisky was in that confounded
trunk. y.
1.-THE woman o. the hotel where we got
out said it was too late to get anything
to eat, and the colonel got mad and
called me q burlling chump for drag
ging him out into the wilderness.
when the boywaked us in the morn
ing, the colonel Gsked becauseh he had to
get up 60 early. de had the deuce Of q
time finding his things in that internal
trunk. and he kicked because I got i'm
patient.
1.-THE woman at the hotel looked queer
when we got down. Going fishingY says
she. You'd better look out for the con-
stable. It's against helaw to fish round
here Sundays
"Then the colonel git suspicious and
said he didn't want to y locked up
got him into the wagonland the driver
says: Better look out fol the constable.
It's against the law to tsh round here
Sundays
Say says the colona, I'm not going
to get locked up and bfng eternal dis
grace upon my family.I choked him
off finally, and we staitfl. Then we met
q farmer, and he lowed hat we'd get in
trouble if we fished on Sunday. The
driver grihned and tn, colonel, like the
eternal galoot he Is, syS 4 told you So
1t took me about 10 minutes to choke
him off. but lac growad all the way to
the stream.
ssSay." continued tn, major, did you
ever see thecolonel catf, trout NO? Well.
neither did anybody dse. He couldn't
catch trout in aweelbf leap years. BY
ged, it was q sight b see him whip
the stream. 1t was lite driving balky
mules over broken btdge. He banged
that river until half tie fish in it were
scared to death, and k1ess he thought
he could catch trout knocking them
stone dead with his rot. He lost about
two dozen flies trying to cast half the
length of his rod, and then he got his
line all tangled up in the bushes. Did
you ever hear the coldbel swear2 Well.
hodcarriers and river pirates aren't in it
with the colonel. TAX about breaking
the Sabbath! Why. Lhe colonel swore
enough to send an army to perdition for
eternity.
"While the coloneJwas cussing every
thing in sight the diver came tearing
down the road, waving his hands like a
windmill in full sail s
'Hir he yelled, the constable's COM
ing, and he's after Bu too. You'd bet
ter get. Cut. up Through the woods
there, and I'll met you at the turn Of
the pike. &
1--WE didn't know where the turn Of
the pike was. but1the colonel grabbed
me by the arm ard hustled up into the
woods. When wd got under cover, he
was steaming Lille a soap factory and
cussing me too.
"'What in the name Of thunder did
you ever bring ne out here for? You
want to get me arrested, do you?'
''I was that speechless that couldn't
answer. just Stood and looked at him.
Pretty soon recovered.
Brought you out hereY said /. You
blooming blot cf idiocy. who brought
you out here? You came yourself
"Then the colonel got madder than
ever, and he wouldn't talk again. But
that was mercy.
"It was getting along toward dark
when we got to the hotel. The. colonel
was prancing up to the frout door when
the man who drove the team come out
of barn.
"'Hey,' says he. the constab)e's wait
ing for you fellows. He's over to the
hotel
"Maybe l and the colonel didn't run.
We just lit out and hung around in the
brush until it was plum dark. Then we
crawled back to the hotel, but ths con
stable was still sitting there.
''rhen the colonel tried to mako bolt
to the woods. and the constable saw him
With whole pack in full cry after us
the colonel and ran down the hill.
guess we outdistanced the constable ano
his crew. But after awhile they came
after us with lanterns, and we had te
run again. Up in the heavy brush they
lost us, and when we got our wind VIZ
struck out for the railroad.
"The nearest station was 10 miles
away. and the colonel was nearly deac
before We got half way there. he sa'
down on tie and swore that no wPC dy
ing. He was we: thivtssk xno anou
Tie most miserable man that ever cussee
streak of hard luck.
"The colonel got SO bad that ! got SOM
chips and started Are by the railroad