The Olneyville tribune. (Providence, R.I.) 1893-189?, 1893-12-02


the words, he turned the knight over,
and, with monkey-wrench which
the warrior wore, he began 70 undo
his armor
In few minutes the knight ap-
peared in his buckskin paiamas, and
Walker was surprised 10 find him
such small and, in fact, Insignificant
person. Seeing that he outclassed
him when he was out OF his armor.
he began TO bully him, and finally he
/ compelled my ancestor 10 wheel the
barrow, loaded as il was with his
armor and weapons
| Onaccustomed TO such menial toll,
( the knight made such poor progress
that evening found them stll far
from home. The pangs of hunger
added 10 the knights misery. But
Walker disappeared in the woods.
taking with him the warriors long
| spear.
In less than an hour he returned
with couple of fat bullets. and a
. small pig, and peck OF early rose
potatoes disposed about his person in
manner that would have done credit
10 the Kings conjuror.
"And now," said he, as he laid his
booty on the ground, I'VE will light
q fire in the stove"
what stove?" exclaimed my an.
cestor, In amaZement.
'l'll show you," replied Aimless.
"how necessity can create out of ap-
parently the most incongruous ma
terlals satisfactory base burning,
selt-feeding, and seif-regulating Sun
shine range and heater combined,
warranted, likewise, to save fuel and
reduce the cost OF living to one-half."
Speaking thus, he took the war
rior's iron body-piece and placed il
upon several stones, in an upright po-
sition. In few minutes he had at
tached the arm-pieces, thus con-
structing a stovepipe, and. filling the
contrilance with leaves and wood, in
less than quarter of an hour he had a
merry fire blazing therein. Filling
the helmet with water, he placed it
upon the opening in the armor for
the knights neck and left il to boil,
while he prepared the chickens.
These he put into the pot with the
potatoes to boil. Then, taking the
knights shirt OF chain, he drove four
stakes in the ground at equal dis
tanceS, and suspended the garment
in such manner that, when he had
lighted the fire beneath. il served as
gridlr to broil the porker upon.
Now" said Aimless, as he re.
moved the porker from the gridiron,
and, plac. ng 1t upon my ancestors
shield, began to carve il with the
sword, 'JsSt spear them poultry and
taters outen the pot and we'll begin n
the banquet"
My ancestor tished out the chickens
and potatoes, and they fell TO.
"A couple OF perfectos would just
finish this about right said Aimless,
with a sigh, as he lay back against a
tree for awhile.
Then he filled the stove with more
fire-w wood and said:
"We'll keep that going all night
and snooze right alongside OF it."
which they did.
In the morning they warmed over
ceeded on their way AS they neared
my ancestors castle, Walker began
TO muse, as one who meditates put
ting up Job; but the warrior did not
perceive it, as he was busy pushing
the wheelbarrow. Suddenly Walker
broke out:
Strikes me, my iord, that it were
an unseemly entrance to your city
that you make Perchance 'twere
wiser TO resume your metallic togs
and go in some style"
My ancestor aSsented to this and,
with the pilgrims help, entered his
armor, and Walker fastened the COM
bination lock.
Then the base, ignOble churl rapidly
trundled the supine and hapless
knight to an obscure street in the
lowest and most questionable part
Of my ancestors town, down near the
river, and, opening his visor, gagged
him with piece OF cloth, which he
tore off the tail Of his new coat-of-
arms
Chuckling with tlndish glee, he
then proceeded until he came to the
junk-shop Of William Slathers, after
ward Earl Slathers, the first OF what
became n noble English family, and
there he sold the armor and weapons,
my ancestor included, as old iron at
s cents pound.
He then decamped
Slathers, in examining his bargain,
a little later disco vered. concealed
within. the person of his liege lord.
Between the shock Of finding him
thus and realizing that he had been
buncoed into buying l25 pounds OF
my ancestors as old iron, he almost
lost his mind. Walt McDougall, in