The Wichita daily eagle., 1893-01-06

WHAT MAT-DE FOUND IN THE DESK.
but, by diligeut search, he at last dis
covered flaw concealed In his moral
character. And SO, this very after
noon, as he sat idly scribbling on a
sheet Of that fine, expensive paper
which he uses for his w1itings-in order
that the stationer at least may have an
interest in them--he put down these
words: 81 will never lie to my wife
again" That is how I came into ex-
i6tence.
Just then his wife approached with
the intention of telling him story
about tho family in the second fat.
Those people are as uninteresting as if
/ Howells and not nature had created
them; but the story was to be in three
volumes, with an appendix and copious
notes, because she thought that he was
at work and wished to assist HIM. as
| any other woman would. Also, she
looked over his shoulder, so that if he
happened % be writing anything he
would Immediately be disguised with it
and not be able to finish it before rent
day. But he had already folded me up;
and now he thrust me into his pocket,
saying: THAT goes for one year. II
cannot be great, at least l will be ecr
centric" Well, he seems to be in oarno
est; but I would not oct dollar that
am alive tomorrow.
January IL may have a chance
for my life. Fielding isn't much of
family liar, as liars go in New
York. He is a man who would brush
the chalk dust off his clothes very
carefully after he had been play
ing billiards, but unless his wife asked
him he would not tell her that business
had detained him down town. Compar-
atively speaking, l call that truthful
ness. On the whole, he is fair sample
Of the husband made up out of Aneri-
can goods which, while they are de-
fcient in style, will wear better or the
average patience. In the matter of
lying, it is true that the foreigner is
not so inventive as the American.
While your slow-going European is
grinding out a single lie your smart
New Yorker will get up three; but
whereas the New Yorker will tell his
three lies to one wife, the foreigner
will make his one lie do for four, some
of them in Berlin, perhaps, and others
in Hoboken, SO that he will be still one
point ahead in the estimation of the
father of lies; which shows that thrift
is better than a vivid imagination.
But digress. Fielding did not come
home to dinner this evening. When he
came in, about ten o'clock. he was
chewing new kind of gum which i'm
parts an unreoognizable flavor TO n
mans explanations He said that 1t
was good for the digestion. Well, so it
IS; it enables man to digest a wine
supper without causing his wife any
pain DO not call that lie. Maude
said it was a pity that q man should
spend one dollar for a dinner at n res
taurant when there was a good one
waiting for him at home But, my
dear," said ne, Il took very cheap
dinner. Il cost me only ten cents. I
am not going to spend any more money
unnecessarily" He stated the exact
facts about the dinner. Is was very
cheap, though abounding in luxury.
We shook dice for it with Tom Freeman
and stuck him. His only expense was
ten cents for the waiter. If he gets
caught for the next one that will not be
spending money unnecessarily. He
simply will have to spend it If the dice
run against him.
January 3.-"Howdy. who is that?"
Maude is holding up photograph about
the size of four postage stamps. A
charming face it IS, though nobody
would think 50 who judged by
the way it affects you, Maude.
She is younger than you; it
was by several years when that little
camera caught her prettiness. Come,
Howdy, talk right up like man. Who
is she? And why have you her picture
in your vest pocket, my son?
''Oh, don't know" says Howdy. II
forgot it was there"
That's the truth, at least. II you
hadn't forgotten it, II wouldn't be there.
Not on Your lie You know that Maude
always goes through your pockets
Well, II can't be helped. She is holding
it right under your nose. Come, old
fellow, you can't pretend not to recog-
ulZe II now.
That? On, that's Myrtle Locke
Used TO know her in Cambridge when
was a freshman"
"Howdy. did you ever care for her
very much?"
Lie, II you want 70, my son. say no.
I'll let YOU of on a question like that.
The man who can explain such matter
10 his wife hasn't been born get. II
You admit that you did care for Myrtle
once your wife viii be grieved- II you
say that you never did you'll feel mean
and traitorous 10 a memory that hes IL
your heart Ike a rose that has opened
while all the other pos.es in the bouquet
have withered because they were FULL
blown too soon. But i l. the part q
generosity. Howard. nv sov. - suffer
even shame that vou- VIE may De re-
Hayed il hsr mind