davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
uru;,h uoro on ootricb u aa;d

-"I wish I were an ostrich" said
Hicks, angrily, as he tried to eat one OF
his wife's biscuits, and couldn't. II
wish you were," replied Mrs. Hicks. "I'd
get few feathers for my hat"
Jasper-"Bighead is strange man
for a philosopher" Jumpuppe-"In'
deed ?" Jasper-"Yes. he said that all
men were merely animals, and yet got
angry when called him an ass"
= Harry P. Swift, recent medal win
ner in the postal service, on duty in New
York, memorized in six months over
half the post Offices in the United States
which, in 1892, amounted to 67,66S.
= In the bayou flowing through the
large sugar plantation of Gabriel Mon
taigne, lying seven or eight miles south
of Thibodeaux, La, there was recently
killed an alligator known to be some.
thing over 120 years old.
= Anxious Loger-"Jimmie, do you
think your sister thinks well of me?"
Jimmie-"Naw; l know she don't"
"How do you know, Jimmie ?" "Cause,
I heard her say she would just like to hug
the life out of you"
= An important reform in methods Of
buying and selling eggs has been adopt
ed by some Western dealers who are pur-
chasing for the English markets. They
buy by weight, refusing all that do not
come up to certain standard.
= "for a long time I suffered with
stomach and liver troubles, and could
find no relief until began to use Ayers
Pills. 1 took them regularly for few
months, and my health was completely
restored."-D. W. Baine, New Berne, N.
@.
= Black-"They've got twins up at
Quiver's house," White-"You don't
mean it'll What did Culver say when be
heard of n" Back-"He Strengthened
up, drew long breath and exclaimed.
Gracious, but isn't this growing coun-
try, though"
Dew is great resFecter of colors.
To prove this take pieces of glass OF
boards and paint them red, yellow, green
and black. Expose them at night and
you will find that the yellow will be GOV.
cred with moisture: that the green will
be damp, but that the red and the black
will be left perfectly dry.
To successfully water cucumbers.
melons, etc., place an ordinary three.
inch tile in the centre of each bill, with
lower end four to six inches in ground
Fill tile with water, which will gradually
be absorbed by the subsoil, and the upper
earth will not be left in a condition to
grow hard and crack.
- There is in Spain river called Tino
which has very extraordinary qualities
It's waters, which are as yellow as the
topaz. harden the sand and petrify it in
a most surprising manner. If stone
falls into the river and rests upon anoth.
er they both become perfectly united and
congIutinated in year. 1t wilhers all
the plants on it's banks, as well as the
roots of trees, which it dyes oi
the same hue as its waters. No fish live
in it.
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29

One of two things is true. We Ell.
ther give according to our means, or &C.
cordiDg to our meanness.
- Ayers Cathartic Pills are known to
be the safest, surest, and best purgative
medicine ever offered to the public.
They are mild yet certain i'm their effects,
give tone and strength to the stomach,
and keep the system in perfectly
healthy condition.
1.-THE soil of California is so fruit
full" said native of the Golden State
"thst a man who accidentally dropped a
box of matches in his field discovered the
next year a fine forest of telegraph
poles" That's nothing 10 my State" "
said native of Illinois. "a cousin OF
mine who lives there lost button off his
ticket and in less than month he found
g. brand new suit of clothes hanging on a
fence near the spot"
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
Hauny H00SierS,

VIM. Simmons, Postmaster of ldavllle,
Ind, writes Electric Bitters has done
more for me than all other medicines COM
hined. for that bad feeling arising from
Kidney and Liver trouble F." John Leslie,
farmer and stockman uf same place, says :
"Fipd Electric Bitters to he the best Nd
nev and Liver medicine, make re feel IKE
a new man" j. W. Gardner, hardware
merchant, same town, says: Electric bitters
is Just the thing for man VINO Is an run
do% - and don't care whather ne lives OF
dies ne found new strength, good appet!te,
and felt just like he had a new lease on NE
Only soc. a bottle ut Hill. Bros. Drugstore
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
= This winter will long be remember

- This winter will long be remember
ed in Pike county, Pa, where several
storekeepers had no customers and the
schools have been closed since Christmas.
The returns from certain districts in the
February election were twenty-five days
in reaching the county seat, and had to
be thrown out because they were filed too
late. The people in the snow-bound re-
gion where it has been sno wing since
November, and the drifts are fifteen feet
deep, are living on potatoes and pork.
No weddings have taken place in about
three months.
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
Smashing a Divorce.

They have got the right kind ofa judge
presiding over the divorce court in New
York just at present. In several cases
that have come before him this week be
has appealed to each of the unhappy
pairs to heal their differences. He
hasn't always succeeded, but in one'or
two instances his efforts have not been In
vain.
"Why don't you kiss each other and
make up ?" said his honor to an aggrieV'
ed husband the other day, after
he had listened to both sides of the CASE
"Perbaps she doesn't want to-" said
the husband, with the blush of BRIDE
groom.
"she must want to-" said hejudge. Il
want to show right here that you can get
along together"
"Well, come" said the reassured hus-
band to his wife, as he grabbed her firm
" about the body and gave her fervent
kiss.
"Now, 60 out arm and arm," said the
judge.
She locked one arm in her husbands,
caught up her dress with the other,
and the couple walked out in great
shape.
We commend this Daniels example to
the attention of all divorce courts.
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29

TO the Defendants Hattie Broyles, Eliza
beth Grayson and Missouri Writer:
TAKE NOTICE, That the Complaint
herein was fled in the office of the Pro-
bate Judge in Anderson c. H., S. G., on
the eighth day of March. y. d. 1SGi. for
the purposes stated in the foregoing Sum
mons, and if you fail to apply for the
appointment Of Guardian or Guardians
ad Iitem within twenty days from the
service hereof upon you, the Plaintiff
will move the Court Of Probate to ap-
point Guardian nd litem for each Of you.
Dated Anderson, S. c., March 9th, 1893.
MURRAY IL WATKINS,
Plaintiffs Attorneys.
Noroh O 1909 36
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
NEW TAILOR SHOP.
B, R CLARKE, Proprietor.


THE undersigned has opened Mer-
chant Tailoring Esta blishment on
Whitner Street, one door above Auditors
office. Having graduated from first class
Cutting School Of New York City, l am
prepared to give you perfect fit Entire
satisfaction guaranteed in every instance.
Cleaning, Repairing aud Altering done
on short notice and at reasonable rates.
Country Cutting at One Dollar per Suit
A full line of Samples for Suitings al
ways on hand
All ask Is a trial for anything you wisi,
done in the Tailoring line, and will guar
antee to treat you right. Remember the
place-one door above Auditors Office, on
Whitner St. Respectfully,
B. r. CLARKE.
Jan 18, 1893 20 3m
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29

We have more than 100000 men tit
for military duty.
The South commenced exporting
cotton los years ago.
= Nearly 100000 persons are III our
jails and penitentiaries.
= Chicago expects 5000, 100000 from the
Worlds Fair visitors.
- The negro colony at the National
Capital has 5000 members.
Thirty-two states and territories
have given women some form OF sui
frage.
-"When you pass farm" soys a
writer, "and see a large barn and small
house, you may know the man is boss.
When You see fine house and dilapi-
dated barn, you may understand that the
woman has things her own way; and
when there is new house and good barn
YOU may take it for granted that the wo-
man and man are about equals"
Louisville girl, who plays on the
cornet, is said to have discovered that
performers on wind instruments general
iy develop dimples in their cheeks, caus-
ed probably by the frequent strain on the
facial muscles, which are brought into
play by act of ofblowing. But heaven help
ns, ifall the girls 60 to playing cornets for
dimples.
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
TORNADO INSURANCE +!

REAT destruction by Tornado in
VI Mississippi and Georgia, and also
near Anderson, S. c. Let ME put Tor
nado Policy on your dwellings. Also,
Fire Insurance, if you are not already in
sured. Delays are dangerous.
A. B. TOWERS.
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29

THE STATE OF SOUTH CAROLINA.
COUNTY OF ANDERSON
IN THE COURT OF PROBATE.
J. E. Williams, as Administrator with
the Will annexed of Frances E. Glynes,
deceased, Plaintiff, against Hattie
Broyles, Corrie Valentine, Missouri
Writer and Elizabeth Grayson, Defen-
dants.-Summon for Relief.
To the Defendants aboye named:
VOU are hereby summoned and re-
Il quired to answer the Complaint
herein, the object of which is to secure a
Final Settlement and Discharge of the
Plaintiff as Administrator Of the Estate
of Frances E. Glynes, deceased, with the
Will annexed, and which is filed in the
Office of the Probate Judge at Anderson
G. H., S. c., and to serve copy of your
answer upon US at our Office in Ander-
son, s. c., within twenty days from tho
service hereof, exclusive OF the day OF
service, or the Plaintiff will apply to the
Court for the relief demanded in the
Complaint.
Dated at Anderson, S. c., March Sth,
A. D. 1893.
MURRAY e. WATKINS,
Plaintiffs Attorneys.
Attest: w. +. Cox,
Judge of Probate.
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
IMPORTANT NOTICE.

can supply you with the best Buck
wheat Flour, best Molasses, best Cheese,
best Tea and Coffee, Oat Meal and Grits at
small profit, and many articles for less
than cost. 1900 Rolls Wall Paper to beau
tify your dwellings for sale low by
A. B, TOWERS.
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
JIM WILKES. -

T DESIRE to inform the public that my
i Stallion, Jim Wilkes" will stand
every other week during the Spring season
at MCGEE IL Dillinghsm's Stables, in the
CITY of Anderson. When not there he
will stand at my farm, near Belton. For
further information apply at the Stable or
T. G. POORE, Belton, S. G.
N1nrnl1 6 lSl3 81
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
BRADFIELD'S &
FEMALE \
REGULATOR

CARTERsv1LLE, April Is, 1886.
This will certify that two members Of my
immediate family, after having suffered for
wears. from Menstrual Irre2ularity,
being treated without benefit by physicians,
were at length completely cured by one bottle
of BradfieId's Femnle Regulator. lts
effect is truly wonderful j. w. STRANGE.
Book to "WOMAN" mailed FREE which contains
valuable Information on all female diseases.
BRADFlELD REGULATOR CO.,
ATLANTA, GA.
FOR SALE BIZ ILL DRUGGI6TS.
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
Registration Notice.

Office Supervisor of Registration,
Anderson, S. c., Feb 8, 1893.
THE office of Supervisor of Registration
will be open cn the first Mondays in
March, April, May, June and July for the
transaction of such business as the law
directs in connection with the registration
of voters.
The Office will be open every day from 8
a. m. to 1 p M, and from 3 p. nj. to 5
p. m. for the renewal of lost Certificates.
OrF1CE-In the County Commissioners
Office.
J, L, GLENN, Supervisor.
Feb 8, 1893 80 E.8 3m
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29

NOTICE FINAL SETTLEMENT,
IN The undersigned, Administrators OF
the Estate nf Richard G. Kay, deceased,
hereby give notice that they will, on the
l4,h day of April, 1893, apply to the
Judge Of Probate for Anderson County ior
q Final Settlement OF said Estate, and
discharge from their Office as Adninistra-
tors. E. R. KAY,
R B. KAY,
Administrators.
1r.1 1s 1000 IT
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
YOUR HOME
Isnot Furnished without a Piano
or an Organ

NOTHING completes the furnishing of house
so we'll.
No present lou could make your family would
be more acceptable or give them so much enjoy
ment and benefit.
IF you had been paying ten dollars per month
on Piano two or three years ago you would now
have it paid for.
If YOU don't begin soon old age may overtake
you, and you will 30 through life with an unfur-
nished and cheerlcss home.
Why delay?
Pianos are cheap, very cheap. Never so good
for the money. Less than one-half their cost for
merly.
And the terms are so wonderfully easy. Only
few dollars paid monthly will secure one.
Start in and 1t will be yours and paid for before
you know it.
Do you want Piano or an Organ If SO come
in and talk 1t over. We can suit you and save you
money.
II you can't come in and talk 1t over, just drop
us o line.
JOHN l.. HAYNIE & DAUGHTERS,
Greenville, S. c.,
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
ADVICE TO w OMEN

lfyou would protect yourself
from Painful, Profuse, Scanty,
Suppressed or Irregular Men,
situation you must use
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
DIR, j, HARRIS,
PHYSICIAN and SURGEON,

ANDERSON, S. @.
OFFERS his services to the people of
" the City and surrounding country.
OFFICIAL A. N. Todd IL Co.'S Drug
Store. Besidense, on South Main Street.
March |, 1893 80
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29


ting into the kingdom of his Satanic
majesty, but I have plan that empties
seats of the workers in the church."
"That is just what I want" said the
king.
II make these people overwork on Sat
urdays. For instance, make some
good man the preacher depends upon, or
some devout Sabbath-school teacher, to
make Saturday the busiest day in the
week. Ijust keep him rushed with neg,
lected things till late at night, and then
he oversleeps OF is sick the next day, and
can't get out, or if he goes he is too tired
and sleepy to take part Or even listen"
"Splendid plan !" cried Satan.
"Yes, it works we'll with delicate wo
men. If they clean house, or have Sat
urday night company, they can be kept
home without knowing that they have
broken the Sabbath the day before. A
church party late Saturday night helps
with empty seats"
"You are doing finely, my imps," his
majesty said, warmly-for his breath WAS
q flame of fire. preachers may work
and pray over their sermons all the
week, but there will be no results in
preaching to empty sests. One of the
most important things we have to con-
sder is how to keep people away from
cturches on Sabbath. Your plans are
excellent, but might suggest smother
good point. All preachers have human
imperfscinns-soue fault of manner or
speech. Get Christians to criticise their
pG-:nr. .-l"cially before their children.
This keeps young people from wanting
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29
LOOK OUT!

March IS, 1898
The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-29

BETWEEN ANDERSON. BELTON & GREEN
VILE.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-09-28
BRIGHT BITS.


Grinnen-And young Fridley went to the
dogs, did he? The last time l heard Of him
Miss Miggles was trying to reform him.
Barrett-Yes, but she gave that up She
married him.-ChlcagO Tribune.
How do you like this style of bonnet?" she
asked.
Il don't know yet" he answered, without
looking up from his paper. Il haven't seen
the bill yet."-Washington Star.
Haversup More-Weary Walkers too much
Of a ristocrat fer de business
Nancy Steppes-Whats he doin' now?
Haversup More-GOt so he won't sleep any
where 'cept on flower bed.-Puck.
Yes. sir my wife is a most extraordinary
woman: When l proposed to her what do you
think She safdf"
This is so sudden, of Colrse.''
NO. sir; she said 1 expected this New
York Press.
Governess-Yo see. my dear the antipodes
livc on the other side of the earth, and
thet only 90 to bed when we are getting UP,
Little Emma Then, fraulein, l suppose my
brother Fritz, the student, is an antipode,
eh:-Fhegende Blaetter.
Miss Elder-Yes. Mr.. Slldds, the servant
who admitted you has been in our family for
forty years.
Mr. Skldds anxious to say something
How interesting. Of course she is attached
to you from having nurscd loI in your in
fancy.-Detroit Free Press
Along a sandy beach they stroll,
And hear the oceans solemn roll.
He tried to kiss her Don't" cried she,
Somebody will be sure to see
He said: Nobody can. my dear,
Because you see nobody's near"
you quite forget persisted she,
That all the oceant IS but sea" =
He kissed her then and said "Tis well,
1t isn't fresh, and will not tell"
Detroit Free Press.
They were seated on the hotel piazza to-
gether, and, TO tell the truth. she found him
very dull. Suddenly she was seized with an
idea.
How far off is that mountain, Mr.. George?''
1.-TWO miles"
You couldn' walk there and back in two
hours"
"CouldntI2 Well, guess 1 could. can
do it in an hour"
Really? Well don't believe it. I'll bet
you box of candy that you can't start now
and be back in an hour" -Harper's Bazaar
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-09-28
The Policeman's Mistake.

The police have had special orders to take
care of the farmers in town, and that gave
rise to an incident which Judge Collins will
remember for long time says the Chicago
Post. The judge goes away every summer to
Lake Mtltona, where he is president of sum
mer outing club that includes ex-Congress-
man William f. Mason. William j Campbell
w. B. Keep, John Hsaley, James Reuben
Bailey Van Cleave and other DISTINGUISHED
citizens. AS regularly as he goes away the
judge acquires fine leathery color and this
added to a certain ruSticity of demeanor
which arises from long residence in the fast
nesses Of Norwood Park, makes the distin-
guished jurist look like farmer. The Judge
came in Tuesday carrying a large bag, and
was met at the station by the suave William
J. Campbell. The gentlemen shook hands
and walked away arm in arm. At the door
Mr. Campbell felt tap on the shoulde' He
turned around and confronted policeman
Go chase yourself said the policeman,
earnestly.
Sir" said Mr.. Campbell.
Leave this reuben alone and do hot
foot said the officer.
policeman" said the Judge, fiercely how
dare you insult my friends? l am Judge OF
the circuit court.
Well" said the policeman, not at all
abashed, you may be Judge of the circuit
court but you don't look as though you was
much of judge Of green goods"
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-09-28
Mr.. Peters of schoharie on Modern
Racing Graft.

Mr.. Peters of Schoharie on Modern
Racing Graft.
John Kendrick Bangs in Harper's Weekly.
1 don't know much bout racin' craft, but
those of them I've seed !
Is mighty curiouslookin things, IN spite OF
all their speed.
The Viggyiant. that some folks thinks the
fastest thing a1oat.
Is just about as safe think, as any unbroke
goat.
wouldn't trust my life aboard a thing that
looks like that
Not even if you'd offer me thousand dollars
fiat:
I'd sooner take my chances on a Single in the
Than go a mile outside on her upon the cam
NEST day.
She'sgot, it pears to me, about two million
A-fastened on to .masts and spars that looks
so very fran
I'd rather meet grizzly, with a toothpick in
Than set ABOARD o. that there boat six inches
from the land.
wouldn't care shillin' if she'd go thou
An beat cable message like she does them
other yachts;
You couldn't get me sailin'-not for all the
British crown
On boats with hulls like razors with the
blades a-hangin' down.
An when takes up racin' it II be on solid
ground,
So long as boats like them's the kind that
folks consider sound.
There fun enough for me on land with my
old sorrel mare
That went a mile in seven two last autumn at
the fair.
Though if the boys up my way wants aquat-
ticks I'll consent.
1 always b'lieved in lettin' boys go follow up
their bent.
But all the water races into which 81 Peters
goes
Will be il drinkin' from the pump or squirtin'
with the hose
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-09-28
PERSONAL.

Judge Robert s. Hofiiu Of Alabama, who
served ia the Fortyfo fourth and Forty-ffth
Congresses. boasts that his expenses during
the thirteen months ot his Two terms
were not over $50 a month and that ne re-
turned 20 his home with s. GlO ont OF his two
years salary and has been living in amuence
ever since
While the Queen Regent Of spain was out
for drive the other day she observed little
girl playing on the railway line close to a
level crossing. Alarmed al the danger OF the
child. She descended from her carriage,
snatched the girl up. and carried her TO "a
place OF safety. A few moments later tram
dashed past the crossing.
The Marquis Of Queensberry and his ubiq-
uitous grievance still continue to turn up In
the English papers The latest story about
his lOrdship is to the effect that ne actually
| started for Homburg to thrash Lord Rose
berry whom he held responsible Tor having
secured the elevation of Lord Drumlanrlg'
the marquis son. to the English peerage
without his papas consent some friends,
who had more sense than the most noble mar
qnlS. hnally persuaded him TO reLnqulsh MS
Warnke purpose.
Roumanian papers say that Queen Eliza
beth C'Carmen Sylvia) will return to Buch-
Arrest next month Her rooms in the royal
palace are about ready for occupancy Her
malcstry, il may be remembered. left ROuma-
MIA al the time of the rupture OF the engage
meuJ between the crown prince ana Mile.
NacareScu, and persist ntly declined until a
rev weeks ago to take up residence IN
Bucharest again. The queen is stu weak
and hardly able to walk, but the physicians
think that She viii stand the journey and I'M
prove in health in Roumauia.
Miss NJ. f. Hewitt, who died in New Castle,
KY, few days ago. was one Of the best
known and most popular teachers in the
south. and from Kentucky to Texas there are
ID
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-09-28
Let Justice be Done.

From the Nashville American (Dem).
The recent murder of innocent negroes at
New Orleans by u mob solely because the lat
ter could not find the brother OF the victims,
who had murdered judge, Will, If it goes I'M
punished, constitute burning disgrace on
clylllzat on. If the law has any majesty or
good citizens any manhood, let the members
OF the mob which committed this foul crime
lie brought to the bar of justice and punished
with the extreme penalty of the law. No
hlacker crime is known to American criminal
annals than that perpetrated az inst these
weak and innocent victims. Let the people
convene ia mass meeting and speak out and
put the Wheels Of the machinery Of justice in
motion. With the same spirit that the muir
dere~ Of the Judge is hunted. the mob muder-
ers should be pursued. Let justice be done to
all, high or low, white or black.