davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
ANNEXATION Talk.

tits reported that Minister Blount
has limited encouragement 10 the lead.
Ing annUXNiiOnists lately. Nothing
viii be done, however, Until he takes
back his report. Hu hopes 10 leave
here July 21ih. Some think President
Cleveland viii resubmit the Harrison
treaty, with some mo iiticalions,
Professor w. ID. Alexander, the Ha.
waiinn historian, has been appointed
10 80 TO Warrington aud assist Minis.
ter Thureton II the negotiations.
Al exhaustive I'm. ncinl statement,
made by Minister Damon, shows that
the government IL running within tue
limit OF Ets .a0nthiy income, and after
providing for tue payment ~ old bills
under tho monarchy, amounting to
sbs,0OO, There will be- an available sur
plus Of over 100000.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

CHICAGO, July ga long and ani.
mated session OF the Western Passen.
ger association was held today n
discuss Worlds Fair rates but mo
conclusion was reached. The Santa
Fe submitted new proposition, which
will be considered tomorrow.
The war Tales made effective by tho
Great Northern and Northern Pacific
were introduced intO new territory
today, the 81. Loais roads beginning
& apply them between 81. Louie, Salt
Lake aud Ogden, making a rate be.
tween these points Of s8l.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
GENERAL FOREIGN NEWS.
Tho Attitude Of tho Powers IE The
SIamcSo Question.
Gladstone Makes speech. o. Japan
aad unwaii.-Lntsst Advice-
from the Islands.

PANS, July ga cabinet council
was hold today, at the conclusion Of
which a semi.oiliolnl statement was
Issued, to the effect tina, In conformity
with the unanimous vote Of the senate
aud chamber, the government had
taken such measures to safeguard the
interests anu dignity OF France as
were considered, from Slams reply 20
the French ultima,um, 10 have been
rendered necessary.
The Chinese charge d'afAira called
To-Day ON Devolle and explained tins
Chinese Views IN tho FraRCo-Slamyse
dispute.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

an IMPROVED PROPERTY iS Any
~ quantity. crosby SiCrosly, q Main 81
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
THE BRITISH INTERESTS.

LONDON, July 25.-ln the commons
To-Day the conservatives worried the
government with many minute ques.
lions ~ 10 what was being done In
siam 10 care for ihu British Interests.
The ItmCs Bangkok correspondent
says: There 10 great uncertainty as to
what Will happen II the blockade be-
gins tomorrow. The British residents
will meet the British minister 10 com.
plete measures for defense IN case the
dangerous ciasetf, deprived by the
blockade .Oi employment, attempt to
iiso ana loot tho city The govern.
ment has Issued proclamation warn.
log the population 10 behave peace.
ably ana refrain from attacking Tor.
eignUts.
A late Dispatch to the Times from a
somi.Oilicial source says: Ali O'Clock
the French vessels passed the mouth
OF the Menam river and exchanged
aRlutes with tho SiGmeEe forts.
The Paris Correspondent OF the
Standard says; lt " stated semi
officially that the blockade viii not DO
confined 10 the estuary OF the Monatu
river, but also 10 thb river tnst ana
west. IL IL said that there ~ no inten-
ton TO lombard BAugkok, although the
bgtteries ON both sides OF the river Will
to destroyed, and the Royal Palucr,
where $4,000 soldiers are believed 10 DO
mnsSgl VIII be attacked aud occupied.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

BuRLISoTON, Ia, July 2j.-An un.
known person flred through tho win.
dow Of Leonard Ff!tchu's house this
morning, shooting Mrs. Frltcho through
the heart ~ She lay in ted. A neigh.
Dor anu his sou and tue husband Of the
dead woman anu n hired SRI are under
arrest. There Ia no positive clue.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

WASHINGTON, ID. o., July 25.-As
the result u counter olers, the treas.
ury lurchaHed yesterday l0I 800 ounces
OF silver al S060j0 per ounce, includ.
Ing the 10000 ounces announced last
night.
The price Of silver In London today
shows u eight advance over yestefday'z
price.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

CHICAGO, July 25.-JuJge Sioin, In
the State Circuit court, Issued u rule
against the officials ana directors OF the
Fair to show cause why they should
not be- attached for contempt In dis
oleyiug his injunction - keep the
Exposition open on Sundays. Tne
hearing Is set Tor Thursday.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
CHINA INDIGNANT.

TIES TsES, July 2j.-rho Chinese
government received ths news Of
Frances territorial demand upon Siam
with amazomont and indignation. At
Pekln the oontontion IL that b0ih
Tanks Of the Mekong 10 point well
s.uth Of the twenty.ihird parallel are
Chinese possessions. The Maintain
party, which Is bitterly anii.Ffench, 10
trying 10 force tho government TO
Interfere
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

PARIS, July 25.-Fmuce, Italy,
swilzviland, Belgium aud Greece have
agreed 10 exclude the two aud n half
franc silver piece from international
circulation IN thn Latin union.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
sLI.IIr MIsrAMr.
figurcs showing thc balance ut Trade
Against as Corrected.

WAHIiNutoN, d. c., July o.
Theio ~ mach interest aroused amUug
statitticiaus by the discovery that hu
figures Of the balance OF trade against
this country for the Gtcal year ending
June 3Jth la.t, ~ shown 10y the records
Of the bureau Of statistics Of tue treas
ury department, arc about siU,OOO,uuO
out OF the way. Instead Of an adverse
balance OF S93,0O0,00J, the corrected
returns show only about s5D,OOJ,uOO.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

Z NlNANCIAb CRASHES MAKE DIFFERENCE 10 Us
e. We stand on pinnacle cyclones
or the totnadoes Of the far
sl further prices the following quotation
VIII Let everybody not WALKER
q fYLEH Co viii remain high dry
We buy for Cash and We Sell the Known in thu
United States.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
SILKS AND
DRESS GOODS
CUT TO PIECES.

No. 80 pieces Of wash SILKS, warran.
ted fast coIor.. cut from zoe 10 SIC.
No. --lj pieces Of Wash silks, cut
from gio tn &C..
No. 3-H pieces Of Japan silks, actual.
~ worth sl.-1, cut to 6ic.
No. i-jl styles In Gommio printed
India silks, cut from 100 30 &c.
No. Sour entire Stock u host and
purcst quality India silks, regular Si.g3
aud sl.jJ goods, cut 10 U1c.
No, or pieces ~ beautiful Figured
Swiss Twllicd silks, cut nom Sl.Ultob7c.
No. "a pieces " Black Figured India
silks, now designs, sold everywhere for
sl.0O, cut 10 bic
No. s-A iow pieces " handsome
Figured India silks, cut from Gjc to 200
per yard.
No. DO piecos OF beautiful Striped
and Fancy silks cut a. 72c. These arc
beautiful goods and remarkable values.
No. 100 pieces OF Pongoo silks, tho
pufo article, reduced from Zoe 10 pc
THIS is'n great snap and won't last long
no como early " YOU want any.
No. ll-jl pieces Of tho very host
ffonch Challios, nll We hnvo LEFT OF this
seasons goods, cut from zoo to 40 por
yard.
No. Fan Immense limo Of Fronch
saiinos, cut from 600 10 l6c por yard.
Our entire limo OF Paris Dress Pat
forms Will be- cleared out ut : their rogu-
lar value.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
Imn ERIE nAILnoAp.
Receivers Appointed Ia Take Charge
of Its HAIRS.

NEW YORK, July, 25.--The Horld
rayt, The Erie Railroad company
today went into the hands OF re-.
coiver. John King aud j. q. McCul.
Tough were named by Judge Lacombe
ot The United States circuit court.
Erle's credit has been savagely nj.
lacked In Wall street OF late, owing ~
the mixed condition OF Its finances.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
NOT oN TnE PROGRAM.
An Unexpected Entertainments at the
WORLDS Inir.

CHICAGO, July 25,--An intercstlng
event not on tho official program oc-
CURED shortly elter noon when Com
missioner st. Clair, Of Nes, Virginia,
who had left his badge at home tried
TO enter the grounds wi,htutlt. When
1he gatsMan finally let him through
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
Sotic.,

See the new time card for SallRir
Beach trains In this psper; takes effect
1918 a.m,, July 27th.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

NOttCVs
See tho new time card for Saltnir
Btpch trains In thls paper takes effect
1918 am, July 9Th,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

COlimn Coffee 10 uuequnled for
Purity and Flavor Barlow Thompson
Grocery U.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
TO snccctd Consrr.,m,n unichirr.

EAsTON, Pa, July 25.-At the
special election Of the Eighth Con.
gresslJnnl district 10 hll the vacancy
caused by the death Of Wan. Mu,chlpr,
his son Howard, Democrat, wac
elected over Frank Rseder, Republi.
can, by $500 majority.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

WANTED - EVERYBODY TO KNOW
w they can got castngs fDr stoves ranges
and furnaces. Repairs done on shortest notice.
Apply noAlun Bros, ~ H. aud south.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

IIrASrED SHEEP IN EXCHANGE ron
w HHIt Lake CITY property within two
blocks or Temple j. st. kennedy n Co.,
room 30 OAicari block, NO. 60 W. lnd south,
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
TnE sllUATiUN On Tir IsLAND8.

HONOLULU, via Stn Francisco, July
lB.-Ihr political situation n practical.
~ unchanged. The provisional gov
ernuent has new treaty nearly COM
pleted and Will soon forward II 10
Washington. The expected fight
occurred between the troops of tie
provisional governmentand the kooiRu
lcpur outlaws Of kamai, three soldiers
being killed. kollau escaped with BIZ
vile ana child, but the remainder Of
the lepcfs were captured. Among the
mon killed was Private MuCabr, u
veteran of the Ninth Rhode Island reg
Intent
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
FOR RENT.

C,TARLE FOR TWO HORSES, CLOSE 10
- business, for Tcut cheap Lindsay, 40 L.
second south.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26

TWO COOL FRUNr bEDROOMs TO
a single gentleman, Scar buamcss, En-
quiro at ll7 brigham g., CiJ'
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
WANTED.

LIVERY ONE DESIRING CLOTHES
- cleaned, dyoi repaired and altered
should call on J. tIno,Gi Escruud South SIAN
work guaranteed iu good ftylo nnd Gone on
fhort notice. erconi hand clothing bOught
and sold
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
mAwlIIAN ArEAtns.
Innanosc Radicals Urge the t.s5ru.
ment tu Action.

Hh'Ahf w HNhAANht
SAN FRANCtsC0. July IS a. meet.
INK uf II0miutut radicals 90 held vt
Yokohama recently to consider la.
allan Affair, and resolutions were
adopted urging the japanese govern.
mtnt 10 sund a special cmbassudor 10
Hawaii % bring 10 a successful issue
the n,gOtiaiiuns Pending with the
Hawaiian government Ia relation 10 a
fcstcfatiOn OF the franchise Of the
JApnueto residents OF that county
also that Ia tue CVent OF the Hawaiian
islaude being annexed by tue United
> ntta government or placci unger
the intet's patronage, tho japanese
government be- urged q take elective
measures Tor the protection aud main.
teunucc " tue nights nud interests OF
ihe Japanese subjects there.
IL was furthermore resolved that
upon the establishment VI a dc JactJ
government IN Hawaii II should be-
recognized by japan; that officials
should 10 sent 10 hawaii for the
special control Of the japanese residing
In that county; ,hst iho system Of
sending labofers 10 Hawaii on contract
should be abolished by degrees, and that
the sending Oi capital aud permanent
residents to Hawaii should DO en-.
Outraged.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
FOR SALE.
SngrLANp PONIES ron SALE aMAiS

HOUsE or FIVE rooms, HEAD OF
i 1 Main street a bargain II sold within
next few days. Inquire al 2tl Canyon h0ad.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
HOUSES FOR RENT.

A Ill THE ABOVE WE Will TAKE
IA pleasure ln showing y0ui aud Il will be-
10 your advantage " come and 900 ~ before
calling elsewhere
OWOEsBECK & ROSE,
M, IS W. Second South Street Room o.
Deseret evening news. [volume] (Great Salt Lake City [Utah]) 1867-1920, 1893-07-26
MISCELLANEOUS.
REWARD.
ron RENT.
10 RENT.

A a.ROOMEp COTTAGE, CELLAR AND
"A summer Kitchen CITY water so per
month, Apply 40 THE ohce'
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
A Shrewd Guess.

When there was to be an exam
ination at school little Sammy gen.
orally had sudden attack of i'll
ness. This time, however, his
memory turned traitor, so he found
himself an unwilling victim. The
questions were unusually hard that
day and Sammy felt that he was
doomed. His only hope was that
the teacher would not call him up;
but even this began to vanish, and
when at last he heard his name,
Sammy arose with the air of mar
tyr.
Nov Sammy" began the teach
er, III want you to tell me in which
battle Lord Nelson was killed"
Sammy was in despair, but he
must prove himself equal to the
emergency. did you say Lord
Nelson?" he asked, cautiously.
"Yes."
(which battle?"
"Yes. In which battle was he
killed?"
"Wal," said Sammy, with appar-
ent surprise at such an easy ques-
ton, ~ specs it must er been his
last" boston Budget.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
WHOLE NO. 1857.

tore them cruelty. 1t was not un-
til fully twenty had in this way
been manned and killed that they
seemed to realize the hopelessness
of the thing. That they desisted
at all was surprise to me, for, as
every plainsman will tell you, these
animals are simply fearlesss and as
dogged as a mule. | had watched
this singular battle from hillock
on which l had seated myself.
Why didn't l runp Where could
l run top Beside the cold was
really numbing, and / watched the
fight with a drowsy interest, as if it
had nothing to do with me at all.
fully expected that when the
wolves found that they could not
have the elks they would try me,
but they had evidently forgotten
all about me, and only sat around
for while cycling the horn barrier
wistfully, as if hoping that the elks
would tire out, but finding that the
formidable antlers remained sullen-
ly presented to them, they finally
trotted off. The elks waited foi
some minutes longer, and then
breaking ranks, moved off in the
opposite direction.
By this time was so nearly froz-
en- that it was all / could do to
reach one of the wolves, and tear
the carcass open and creep inside.
Was he big enoughPs Why, man,
the white wolf is as big as a calf a
year old. They have left these
parts some time ago, but while
they were here they were certainly
feared by man and brute. | stayed
in that ones carcass until my blood
got to circulating again, then crawl
ed out and managed to set fire to
some brush, sticks and the like that
| found. Here stayed till day,
when my partner, Nelson, found
me. He had heard the wolves the
night before, and feared I might
fall in with them, though he hardly
expected me home so soon.
We found only the bare bones Of
my poor pony, and | knew / had
such cause to thank the elks for
their timely service, that it was
years before l could bring myself
to shoot one of the beautiful and
intelligent creatures. thought
for long time that | had witnessed
something extraordinary, but an
old frontiersman informed me that
it was the usual way of the elk to
meet his foe when not taken by
surprise.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
Going Away.

He had been worshiping her for
months, but had never told her, and
she didn't want him to. He had
come often and stayed late, and she
could only sigh and hope. He was
going away the next day on his
summer vacation, and he thought
the last night was the time to spring
the momentous question. He kept
it to himself, however, until the
last thing. It was 11:30 by the
clock and it was not very rapid
clock.
"Miss Mollie," he said, tremu-
lously, ~ am going away to-mor-
row."
"Are your" she said, with the
thoughtlessness of girlhood as she
gazed wistfully at the clock.
YES" he replied. "Are you sor-
ryp"
"Yes, very sorry" she murmured.
II though you might go away this
evening"" then she gazed at the
clock wisfully, and he told her
good-night.-Excbange.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
The Fountain Head of Strenath.

When We recollect that the stomach is tho grand
laboratory in which food is transformed into the
secretions which furnish yigor to the system after
entering and snriching the blood; that It is, In
short, the fountain head Of strength it Is essential
to keep this important supplying machine in order.
and to restore it to activity when it becomes mac
tive. This Hostetter's Stomach Bitters does most
effectuay, seasonably, regulating and reinforcing
digestion, promoting due action of the liver and
nend IN orsat naasa ,no, .h y, .n1 oe
There is no nervine tonic more highly esteemed by
the medical fraternity than the Bitters. Phyd-
clans also strongly commend II for chls and fever,
hsumatisn, kidney and bladder trouble, sick
headache and want Of appetite and sleep. Take q
wineglsssful three times a day.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

marriage and faithfulness; in a bad
sense yellow signifies Inconsistency,
jealousy and deceit. Green, the
emerald, is the color of spring, hope,
particularly of the hope of immor-
tality and of victory, as the color Of
the laurel and palm. Violet signi-
ties love and truth, or passion and
suffering. Purple and scarlet sig
nifty things good and true from a
celestial origin.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
For Over Fifty Years

Mrs. Winslows Soothing Syrup has been
used for over fifty years by millions OF
mothers for their children while teethlng,
with perfect success. 1t soothes the child,
softens the gums. allays all pain, cures
wind collie, and is the best remedy for
Diarrhoea. 1t will relieve the poor little
sufferer Immediately. Sold by Druggists
in every part Of the world. Twenty-Five
cents bottle. Be sure and ask for Mrs.
Winslow's Soothing Syrup" and take no
other kind. 1l8Svl
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
Meaning of Colors.

White is the color Of light, pur-
ity, innocence, faith, Joy and life.
Black means mourning, wickedness
and death. Red signifies fire, de-
vine love, wisdom. Blue stands for
heaven, truth from a celestial origin,
constancy and fidelity. Yellow or
gold is the symbol Of the sun, Of
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
Il is Strange

That people suffering from Piles viii
endure them for years or submit TO dan.
gerous, painful, cruel and expensive
surgical operations, when all the time
there Is a painless, certain, lasting cure,
which gives instant relief and costs but q
trifle. 1t is called the Pyramid Pile Cure
and can be found at all drug stores. ANY
druggist will get 1t for you II you ask
him
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Shelf you married a girl in
the hope that she would one day
come into a fortune wouldn't you
feel guilty over it?" He-"Not if
she got the fortune. New York
Herald.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
A Surgical OnaratIon.

For the cure of Piles Is always painful,
often dangerous and useless. and invari-
IDLY expensive; on the other hand there is
new, certain cure, perfectly painless,
gives instant relief and permanent cure
and costs but trifle. 1t is the Pyramid
Pile Cure. 1t is more certain cure than
surgical operation, without any Of the
intense pain, expense and danger Of an
operation. Any druggist will get 1t for
you.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Mr.. Tippel-"I'm-er-iust going
out to see man, my dear" Mrs.
Tippel-"Well, | wish you'd bring
a little of him back in a bottle with
you-l feel thirsty!-Chicago Mail.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Citizen-"Do you have much
trouble arresting trampsP" Police
man-"Oh, no; no matter how
strong tramp is, he will never re-
sist rest."-Yonkers Statesman.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Mamma-"When that boy threw
stones at you why didn't you come
and tell me, instead of throwing
them back?" Little Son-"Tell
you! Why, you couldn't hit a barn
door, Truth.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

you've read Chaucer, haven't
you, Mr.. PeduncleP" 20 yes, Miss
Laura. read that when it first
came out. | don't like it half as
we'll as Ben Hur.' Chicago Tri-
bune.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
MICHIGAN CENTRAL
"The Niagara Falls Route"
Time Card In Effect.
Time Card in Effect.

Da;Iv. All other trains Daily except Sunday.
parIor car on day trains and sleeping cars ON
~ Fhs direct line TO Niagara Falls, Buffalo, New
vo,k Boston, Detroit, Toledo, Chicago, ana III
mint. in the United States and Canada, s.....
Through ticketsto all points In the oni'eu o'"'e'
WHITING. Ticket Agent.
NV. RuGGLEs. @. P. n T. Agt.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

~ never give money to beggars
in the street." said the pedestrian.
"But my dear sir" returned the
beggar, II can't afford an Office
these hard times. You expect too
much. ."-Harper's Weekly.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Mr.. Crimsonbeak-"Isn't it hard
work minding the baby?" Nurse
girl-"Not half so hard as trying
to make the baby mind me. ."--Yonk-
ers Statesman.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Jack-Cheer up, old man, don't
look so blue! Harry-Can't help
it. Jack-Oh, come! Think of
your best girl, Harry-No good.
! married her three months ago.
New York Herald.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

No matter how economical he
may be or how large his wages the
coal-miner often finds himself in a
hole.-Buffalo Courier.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Pessimist-"Dont you wish you'd
never been born?" Book agent
mo; l let other people do that for
me- York Journal.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Solemn stranger-"All flesh is
grass" Deaf man - "Hey ?"
Solemn stranger-"No, grass.
New York Press.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

ats funny about bridal pairs.
They're not like other pears at ALL"
"Why not?" They're softest
when they're green. Indianapolis
Journal.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

Barber-"Do you want hair
cutP" Victim-"Not only one,
but all of them. Judge.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

IL is only the women who can
lawfully hold up a train.-New
York Journal.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11
HU M PH R EYS'

ms PRECIOUS OINTMENT Is tho
triumph Of Scientific Medicine.
Nothing has ever been produced to
equal or compare with 1t as a CURATIVE
and HEALING APPLICATION. It has been
used 40 years and always affords relief
and always gives satisfaction.
Cures PILES or HEMoRRHoIps External
or Internal, Blind or distinguishing and
Burning; Cracks or Fissures; fistula In Ano;
Worms of the Rectum. The relief is imme.
diatc-the cure certain.
Alpena argus. [volume] (Alpena, Mich.) 1893-1909, 1893-10-11

+. N. Choir-''Is your church
supported by voluntary contribu-
tions, Doctor?"
Doctor Howlet-"No, sab; by in
voluntary contributions. It's jess
like drawin' teef ter git der cash
outen my congregation" Puck.