Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1893-07-16
BILL NYE'S VISITOR.
WILLIAM WRITES PBELIHGLY OF A MERRY
LITTLE MOUNTAIN MAID,
And Talks Confdsntally to Hr. Tharbg-Ls...r
From & SiIisen-Ysar-0li Who Requests an
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS Of the Verb "DOns"
Copyright. 1893, BY EDGAR W. Wye.
RuC1- StrN.s ~ n
DUCK SHOALS, n, Q,
ARDEN PosToFEICE. July.

ARDEN fOSIOEFlCE, July.
It Is now that everything Is in full
leaf In this country. A young woman
a trltie over seven feet high comes TO
my slosh on the French Broad and sells
me berries. Once my wife was away,
and did not know how we were fixed
for berries. Berries, both black and
straw and rssp, are sold here at cents
per big quart and hulled ready for the
table at that. They are good all sum-
mer.
"SIt down on tho porch, Birdie"
said, land converse"
She sat down, but still remained tall
er than l was. 1 never saw 3 lunger
wasted person or one who was so uni
formly OF one size all the way down, as
my friend Comstock says-not An
thony, but another man alto
Gether. She had chest like grass
hopper, and as she sat there
with her long, sad face, reminding me
of horse with sunbonnet on, said
to myself: "Shall l buy these berries
and let her 90 home, or wait till my
wife comes and discovers us conversing
and then remain forever unhappy?
Shall break up our happy home or
not?"
She looked hungry, too. She was. l
would say that, regarding her from a
Scriptnral standpoint, she was without
form and void.
The red bugs seemed to annoy her a
good deal on the ankles. That Is how
l came to learn that her calves were on
the front side. She reminded me OF q
Staten Island ferrYboat-you couldn't
always tell whether IL wac going over
to Staten Island or returning.
She was merry little mountain
maid. l think they call her about here
Spayfoot Sal, but 1t may be another
girl who gathers berries and has that
name. am not sure. She Is the Tar
heel SeQuoia of Ticktown. 1t would dc
you good TO see here guileless ways.
Some day she will marry a low set man
with II dogs, and they will live on wild
cucumbers and blackberries and rear
their young, and they will never
laugh, aud he will never get
asphyxiated unless some neighbor In
the ieud business asphyXiates him with
double barrel shotgun and their lives
will be as even and devoid OF incident
as they would be In the penitentiary.
Yet they will be content. Never hav
Ing seen Tiffanys store, they will MOI
yearn for any Of his goods. Never hav
ing boarded at Delmonico's, they will
actually prefer bacon and corn bread OIL
hominY. Two friends OF Splayfoot Sa
went into Ashevile to work al Oakland
heights. They did well for month
Then they came to Miss Vaughan anC
said they guessed they'd have TO quit.
whats the matter?" asked Miss V.
"Well, we can't live on this truck yor
give US 10 eat"
"Why, don't you get the same tina
we all do? What do you have TO eat?'
"Why, we get beefsteak and white
-four bread and veal and lamb meat snc
knicE knacks. Them don't sustain folks
They just tantalize 'em."
What do you want?"
"Why, bacon and corn bread. There's
somethin TO hit, but we can't work here
week after week on goodies. We wan
somethin that won't vanish itself away
in hour or two"