New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1893-03-17
THE TALK or THE DAY.

Two English country yokes recently met in lana
"IIello., said one, there's been conference"
"A conference! What's confcreLce" was the q.
tOnished reply
Don't you know what conference Is :" retortAd
the first speaker. why, It's place where parsons
meet and swap sermons
"swap sermons, do thew Well. then, our parson
must be an unlucky mon, for he alters gets CROP
OF bad uns."
u marquis a few months previous to our story, man.
aged to get himself invited to BALL The new.
cdged marquis could not contain himself for Joy and
an Olympian glance around the room. he CHANGED
10 spy among the ladies' the tall, angular figure OF
an elderly matr0n, with compressed lips, as though
afraid OF wasting her breath. and lean iath.
WHO is that nanny goat ~ said the noble lord to :
gentleman who was standing beside him. And tho
goat is the Ambassadors OF > the mother OF the
KID who Is giving her his arm and the wife Of the
old buck who has the honor OF speaking with Your
EXcelleEcy"-(ll GOivedi.
A san Francisco burglar worked for several hours
the other night to "crack' a safe. and then found
that it was not only unlocked. but that there was
nothing in It,.
granddaughter In an awe-siruck voice. Minister and
l,arshoner talked very pleasantly until he touched
burst OF eloquence said Madam do yoa not believe
in Him who took you ont Of The land Of Egypt out
irate old lady, lifting her hands IN plous horror the
way Hes are told about me! have never been past
tho Falls OF schuylkll In all my ne'-(Philadelpha
Record
"Vcrmont needs more people, says 1.-The Bur-
lington Free Press There Is not city, village or
town I'm the State which does not reflect this need.
There Is demand for farm laborers, for good SER
want girls, for factory and mill hands, and there are
excellent openings in a great many lines OF business,
not to mention the opportunities and facilities offered
for new industrial enterprises
At Central Office first telephone girl-Then Charley
came along and
second ditto--What number! Lines busy-There.
I've got rid OF him. Charley came along and said
90 on Lii I'm Just dying to hear it.-,Boston Tram
script.
President Stevenson and Secretary Carlisle have
provided their sons with Government Offices. AS the
Young men are said 10 be- capable. 1t Is all right But
when President Grant put some Of his reatives-not
sons however-in Office, what wild yawp about 10
publican nepotism there in the Democratic press
exhibition OF tie Pennsylvania Horticultural society
at Horticultural Hall is potato whose eas YES are
cuient tuber which has been gwen ,, i "T %anS,
namo silverea' was grown DrI I ~ i'sr rSn'
sno,t found In tl;cr potato field. Oddities similar
To- this have occurred and been exhibited from Vhs
cuttings from the parent plant, bacI TO the ordinary
green foliage. To th, unprincplei proceedns TINS
sureS genuine blue bloodcd slverleaf." even to ne
third generation OF its ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
Record.
Michigan woman recently received IN chansc
suver quarter OF 1897. she didn't want 10 take I"
NJ first blinking It's age made 1t valeiess o"' '"0
analIv accepted IT, and next day she soM II u
collector for $50
In the Kindergar,en.-Teacher 30 AdeDerI ~ IN,
~ III 49, boon cnucht red handed cutting uP =. -.
tCnished children. DO you know Wher' sa .,, a.
To mt Vou to separate you rom uie feS' u
svcb things and say such things Dial,
s"S T,n,mitous ChOrils-In the Bowery .-lfu'h'
rnoro ore more farmers children educa'ea ~ -.
v,r.os Agricultural College than at any o'"eF '"4
Institution In the county.
She ,.oftly,-I shall never forget ths n's"' "D-
'"I H., o' 'riienderlv)-Tcll me Why's
Sio-And that last waltz!
Ie-You delight me-!
Shc-And you. nh, D., h,ro Immersed you
She more softly than cver'-les, !"u rorart
onr .d three of NV toes .-\Des Moines Asoia""
aThe old flag. the old swaG' and the OLD p'S ro.r
~ ,,nS, canadian Liberal defines the Canadian i'''
policy.
Dsraoli. leaning on Mr.. Torrenss arm r, maassst
oornar ~ that famous eminence. 81 JAM JAN. ,awsj
con'e unon BISHOP who took or MS nat w" orons
v Low nsraeli looked hard ut mo, rs J, J Iance
20 inow what | thought OF tie "SieEouo .. farrst
and then said 81 nydc him II bshop u,' rorrsna
his name Twenty Years In larnaineH'