The Providence news. (Providence [R.I.]) 1891-1906, 1893-01-16
mo TALKEE, NO PAYEE"
A Providence Chinaman Sues a Bird
Dealer for Breach of Warranty.
CHING LING is SORELY TRIED.
The Parrot Would Not Say Word Al
though Ching Coaxed IL With HIS Best
Chinese EIoquence So He Demanded
Another Pet and Brought suit.

Ching Ling, an almond-eyed Celestial,
who runs a laundry at the corner of Fed
eral aud Dean streets is in sore straits.
Last fall he lad green parrot, which he
thought the world CT and which
he had taught TO say "Polly
want cracker" in Chinese in
four different keys in the same breath.
This parrot was Ching's pet, and would
perch on his shoulder aud eat rice as
though. born to il. But 10 Ching's sor
row the parrot suddenly stopped talking
and although he coaxed il in the
choicest of Chinese the bird stub
bornly refused 10 speak Finally
Ching resolved to part with his pet and
he therefore took the bird To OiLey's bird
store on North Main street and effected
an exchange fer gray parrot tLat would
talk. Ching was /, pay $40 TO boot on
the bird and he paid SIG in cash and the
balance he promised in few days The
bird was guaranteed TO be good talker
and was said ID b. in the best of health
However, a. this time the parrot was
moulting, and when Ching had hung his
ncwly-acquired pet up in his Laundry not
n croak could be heard. Tie waited pa
tlently, but still no noise. BY and by
several of his companions dropped in
for friendly game of fan-tan, proba-
bly,, or a pull at the pipe, aud the
Drd at once became the subject
OF discussion. Poor Ching was hea TT
broken. lie coaxed the bird with his
dulcet tones, he sang 60 il the beautiful
love songs of his native land. he poked it
with his finger. smoothed its plumage
gently, but all to no avail. The bird
either would not or could not speak. and
sat as stiff on its perch as though
stuffed.
Ching's friends who had all along car
ri oIl ia m w afl nEa
gether without break, sympathized
with him and seeing his sorrow they
solemly withdrew one by one leaving him
alone with his pet.
But Ching's trials were not all over.
He was approached by an agent of the
bird dealers who wanted the S4 balances
on the exchange. And then came Ching's
opportunity. All the wrath which he
had been storing up in his active little
brain burst forth at once aud
he fairly deluged the agent with
''cuss" words, his little body expanding
under the flow until he seemed several
feet bigh.-Tbe- agent could no nothing
but retreat, and short time afterward
Mr.. Olney went there and tried his hand
on getting the money
Ching blossomed right ont into first
class orator on this occasion and ratified
II mile after mile OF choice gutterals
and sweet sounding phrases but Mr..
Onley clung on and held his breath.
He found the bird hanging in draf:
and his practiced eye saw that terrific
cold had seized upon the parrot. just
before he went away he advised Ching to
give the parrot some rock and rye and
prpper TO cure the cold but Ching won't
say wheth her he did or not.
Later Mr.. Olney took the bird to the
store for the purpose OF doctoring it, aud
shortly afterwards Ching came and
10 Iie
refused, and he immediately brought suit |
against George l.. Olney, bringing the |
action on civil case charging deceit for |
breach OF warranty.
The case was called in the sixth district |
court this morning. and those present |
were given veritable treat. Ching was |
called but before he went upon the stand |
Lawyer Parmenter for the defense.
raised obJectloDs on the point that Ching |
did not understand the nature of an |
oath. but as being questioned as to the
consequences OF perjury Ching gravely
pointed downward, either TO China or 10
= hotter place. and he was allowed TO
testify. Another objection was raised
and that was that IL was not known
whether Ching believed in the Christian
God or worshipped his own private
joss" but Judge Cooke overruled these
objections and Ching was allowed TO tell
his story
But right here the fun commenced.
Ching. In his desire To tell all he knew.
would rattle off few words in the Eng.
iish Language, but would soon drift into
MS native tongue aud would gallop along
at racing speed until the court would be
forced TO rise In desperation and call him
paek 10 American shores again.
Polly no goodee." said he excitedlv.
NO taikee. no slngee, no whistlee no
noise but can holler." and then off he
went in his melodious strains running
and down the scale al lightning speei
ana ietchlng up short with "a ker plunk
similar 10 that made by bull frog.
Judge Cooke became weary at length
VIZ WIZ MS Irequenteitorts TO suppress him,
and the Case was continued for one week