Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1893-01-15

Iowa and Illinois at bis season OF the
year seem to be just bullying out with
corn and other grain. l went to Chi
cage the other day and visited the big
| building where they sell so much corn
and wheat. l asked man II he could
show me some corn. Yes, he said, he
| could sell me- half a million OF February
corn. He mad little basin or II near
| by, and everybody was talking so much
At the same time that IL worried me, and
| | asked him to step over to the hotel.
where we could be by ourselves. We
| went there and up to my room, which
overlooked Cook county as a new presl-
dent might overlook a man who came on
| 10 see him about getting his son-in-law
a place as clerk at the court OF ST.
| James.
ate some of the corn and was pleased
with il, so bought my seed Of him for
next year. He told the board OF trade
about IT, and when / went there the next
| day received an ovation. have, how
ever, pair OF these self fastening pants
buttons IN my trunk, so that 10 little
while you wouldn't have noticed 1t at all.
| The board of trade, or whatever II Is, In
| Chicago, is no way 10 live. Gray haired
men there cut up like parcel OF comics.
| Then they make their wives believe
that they earn livelihood that way.
don't mind having little quiet fun
even at my time OF life, but when grown
up mon with whiskers pour two bushels
| of winter wheat down my back just be-
! cause my clothes were made In Ashe-
, willie murmur and repine.
Men who have arrived at the age OF
FORTY years and find themselves at
| Christmastide buying pianos and shaw
ing outfits for their children ought to
sort of tone down, seems TO me, and
have some dignity. Health also ought
to be considered. Those who have
never tried IL cannot understand how
| cold q couple Of bushels OF winter wheat
is to the person OF one who has been
tenderly reared. One man said In q
mufled tone aside 10 another that he
understood I was one OF tho n1uyoo
richc. This is not so, for my humble
homo is far away from Nauvoo, the old
Hades hole OF polygany. ] am not rich.
and have never led double life, partly
| because am so prominent that am
soon discovered. That Is one OF the
| horrors OF greatness.
The board of trade conversed freely
with each other simultaneously, and IL
seemed almost like an Australian bird
show supported by the house OF repre-
sentatiyes. But what blessing 1t Is TO
| The poor farmers, who have nothing but
their products TO sell, and IL these men
did not buy, where would the poor far
mer be?'
No matter how lonely and forssken a
grain grower may be when the biting
winds OF winter come, he will always be
sure of a warm corner az the board OF
trade building.
Ash said, we are now passing through
the State OF Iowa. 1t is robed In snow,
| but not showed under like some States.
No LIQUOR Is sold Ia this State.
How pleasant IL is 10 live In a State
where the drunksrd has no show; where
| the warm, friendly grasp OF the hand Is
followed By two adult doses OF Barley
corn's stomach BItters, which cheers
lnebriates and leads TO ux0rcIde.
Iowa has shown that there are many
kinds OF drinks unknown to the wide
omen States. I heard man say not long
ago that the Barleycorn drunk was the
worst known on earth and dsfed all b.
| carbonate OF gold trsatmsnt, for no one
knows what sntidote TO use against =
patent medicine.
These bitters, and there are many
others Ike them sold By the great gross
In Iowa, II used in large quantities. pro-
| duce . grateful feeling a. nrst and are
| then followed By al epidemic OF crime.
The interior Of the human stomach
after . BsrIeycorn debauch is said to
look like the burning OF the great lire
cracker factory on Staten Island. Pat
ant stomach bitters Ia Iowa are working
q great curse They are Working u 10
blue crewels on mourning packrrocnd-
Oncs In Iowa beautiful and wealthy