The Wichita daily eagle., 1893-07-09
A HOMILY ON TIE HOGs

auu ne reVeiS IN H!Gn SO openly tnaC ne
! cannot be accused of lack of candor.
Zoologically, his rating is fair. He seems
to preserve his identity as a distinct spe-
| cits as far back as the rocine age, though
| in truth it must be said he has been the
victim of evolution. Like other animals
he has his nationality, presenting types
and prototypes
The Poland China of our western p:ai-
ries is the antipodes of the Babirussia OF
| the Ural mountains. Aside from the
| tusks, bristles and spinal column there is
little worth naming of the latter variety;
the adipose tissue of the former is the pork
of commerce
| Historically he has been victimized
more than once; socially he is osJracised
perpetually. 1t was not fair deal that
the wicked Gadarines should have desig-
mated him to "rush madly iuto the sea"
with evil spirits for which he was in no
! wise responsible. The whole animal king
dom delights to humiliate him by being
more or less fastidious In diet, leaving
the refuse to the poor hog. Nature COM
pensates him in part in granting him inn
munity from all poisons and an eternal
repugnance to tobacco. Commercially he
prohibited under the OLD Levitical law
he has worked his way to the
front rank as food staple. This
is the first recorded instance
that prohibtory laws do not prohibit.
How is it today? 1t is here be has secured
his only victory and his dominion is world
wide. He is greater in this than the little
Macedonian who conquered the world. as
he thought. but in fact mere fragment
of it. Steam, electricity and mule power
are engaged and the seas are white with
the sails of commerce carrying hts sailed
carcass to the nations. The latest boycott
was promulgated by the emperor OF Ger
many, but like Moses, he tackled the
wrong article. Henceforth we may doff
rules in the marts of commerce
and in the arts of peace.
But it is the biped hog which brings down
the average of the entire family. He is by
no means IL mythical hog, living like the
mermaid or the sea serpent. in the inn
agination only, but living, tangible,
almost ominpresent reality. He is 1t
grades and ranks, and, so far as we know,
all nations. His identity is known by his
great versatility of meannass. He is, or
may be. the drunken father of helpless
little ones, whom he starves into the
necessity of begging food to be shared
with him or bartered for drink. He is, or
may be. the indolent lOafer, who borrows
ii dollar on no bette. collateral than spe-
cious promises to pay, he is the farmer
who treats his kindred to an extra barrel
of swill on loading for the market: he is
the miner who salts" his mine, the
huckster who lards his butter, the mer-
chant who docks" his scales and whittles
his yard stick. He spreads himself over
two seats In Il railway car, he orders the
entire bill of fare at a hotel table, he takes
in the free lectures aud free lunches and
goss reluctantly home when there is
nothing better to be had without value
received than midnight air.
A grade lower than any Of these
is the cash tiend, who has
his avaricious snout in every
trough supposed to contain even a sede
mentary deposit of the precious metal 1t
is not to be supposed he is harmless be-
cause his race is almost extinct for his
holdings Increase with acceIerating ratio
as he diminishes in number. The goal Of
his ambition is to survive all other hogs
and to possess all the gold of all the world
under the latest Wall street. Bank of
England system of single standard
This species of the genus hog will do to
watch. Further down the scale is Il new
breed whose habits are not fully known,
though the investing public are find
ing out in sundry ways that
his NAV for suckers is capacious
He seems to have evolved Il
scheme for combination of all the
''plauts" iIi~a given line into IA consolidated
whole, whereby the price of the commodi-
ty made or sold by such plant is greatly
enhanced TO the consumer regardless of
his or her ability TO pay, but asgregating
fabulous results to the projectors. Au-
other feature of the business is his iu- |
genious use of figures which can't lie to
convince the outside investor that the
royal road to wealth has at last been d:s-
covered by thus capitaliZing the great in
dustries and grudgingly offers few
name any intelligent shoat would
have selected Octopus as
both appropriate and euphonious
but 10 inspire confidence he branded the
great enterprise Il trust. Being u new
conner in the herd, it Will be well TO keep
an eye on him.
The hybrid of the herd is the dealer in
futures" This somewhat trausitory
specimen has many OF the attributes OF
the common varieties, such as scant
scruples, an abnormal development OF
greed and dissended stomach; but the
characteristic which distinguishes him
from all others is that he never renders
value received for anything which comes
his way. His m0dus operandi Is this: |
Through the offices OF co-conspirsfors
(said c. c. being of blood KIM, he buys "a
million bushels OF wheat for future deliv-
cry, making a cash payment thereon of
one million cents. This payment IS made
by a0 overdraft, but the results are the
same to him If il goes. Ga closing this
Intricate commercial transaction he re-
tires TO the club TO battle his fevered brow
in ice water aud to join his fellow laborers
in the arduous duty Of furnishing
authentic reports" from the wneat grow
ing districts. The market reports o. The.
day following saow ~ decided bull move
meut in wheat owing to eoutiIued drouth
in Russia and the total demolition
by chiuch bugs OF seven-acre
field in finney county. hausas-" This
bold operator" takes CT his coat, spits on
his hands auQ ualoads-ne5 his wheat but
his deal at a net gain ot say four times the
amount OF his owa draft The hog who
takes the other side OF tie steal is lamb
He is remote from the base o. operation:
in fact he Is widely distributed that CO.
operation with his kind Is iulposs be 4
leculisrity o. this class OF business IS thai
no lamb was ever known la ;suass for
tune This might be different were IL no,
tast on tie PIX side the whole thing IS ai-
lussed GA the heads win aud tails you
losr' principle. Life on Change
Is not. however, without lls