West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1893-07-06
READING NEWS TO A WOMAN.
She Finally Concludes That She
"Haint Il Used Nothin'.-

herself with a pinch of Scotch snuff,
she leaned forward and said
81 don't git much time to read
the papers nowadays. but
allus like to hear what's goin' on.
Is there any news in par;ickler ?''
"Nothing very exciting" he re-
Piled, as he sized her up out of the
corner Of his eye. "Hcre's an item
about q wife killing her husband. :"
"Shocl How'd she do it?"
"With an axe"
Claw me- Wall, she probably
stood it and stood it until she
couldn't stand it no more. It's
awful how some husbands do carry
on. Anything else?
"Here's an item about woman
in this State who drove her hus-
band to suicide by haggiDg him."
"Shool Jest kept jawin' and
complainin' from mornin' till night,
suppose, and he finally got so
tired that he took pizen 20
''No, he hung himself"
"Wall. l don't blame her a mite.
lie was probably shiftless and lazy,
aud it split her temper to see things
goin' down hill. She'll have a
chance now to git married to bet
ter man."
"And here's case," he contin-
ned as ne pretended to read, "of a
wife and mother who ran away from
home with tin peddler, leaving
husband and seven children be-
hind"
'ShoOl Does it give the pertick-
lers ?"
1t says she is supposed to be a
little Eighty in her head
"Wall, she amt bit flighty.
Sac done jest right. know purity
nigh how it was. She had all her
housework to do and them young
'uns TO take keer of, and the hus-
band was probably 6ndin' fault all
the time on top O. that. She jest
shaved aud shaved till she couldn't
slave no more. Some folks think
woman can bear everything, but
they can't. 'spose the youngest
child was purity small 20
''Only seven months.''
"Wall, she probably hated to
leave it, but it would have been
weaned in couple of months any
how, and the father KIN bring it up
on the bottle. It'll serve him right
if its squalls half the time" Any
thing else ?"
"Wby, Inotice that woman has
just married her fifth husband. and
isn't fifty years old yet. Her neigh
bors are so indignant that they talk
OF driving her away"
ola! Got her fifth, eh ? Wall.
If ] was that woman the nayburs
might talk and blow aud be hanged
to 'em. amt fifty years old,
nither, and Pm alvin with my
fourth, and don't keer how soon be
goes. was powerfully deceived in
him"
"Do you say that you'd marry
again If he should dep
"Sartin, and | wouldn't wait
over six months, either. Some
folks think woman has no right,
but she has, and she's a fool # she
don't assert 'em.
"rhis may interest you" said
the man, az he turned the paper
over, "a ST. Louis doctor declares
that the feet Of Indiana women are
gradually but surely growing lar
ger, and that in the next fifty years
70 come every one Of them Will
want q No. shoe"
"Shoo : lie says that, does he (?
"Yes'm."
"And he's a doctor ?'
"Yos'm"
"Wall. be hain't told no startlin'
news. I've been wearin' No. re
ever since ] was a gal sixteen years
old, and I've got the smallest foot
Of any woman in our town as IL is.
did feel kinder sorry when dis
kivered that ia left my spootaclos
on The kitchen clock shelf At home.
but u that's all the news the papers
kin rake up, guess I amt missed
n0thin."