Audubon County Republican. [volume] (Audubon, Audubon Co., Iowa) 1885-1894, 1893-08-10
TABLED TRUTH.
THE PASSING OF UORACE.-AND WHY
HE PASSED.

In the eighth decade of the nine
tenth century there came from distant
lands young man accompanied by
his bride and settled upon new lands
in Audubon county in the province
of Iowa. 1t will be well to call him
Tillman in our tale, mainly because we
do not know anyone of that name,
but this must not detract from the
! truth of our narrative, for we do know
numerous personages in Tillman's fix.
1t so happened that he was in debt for
nearly all of his buildings, but he toiled
intelligently, had courage and ambi-
ton, and being chock full of days work
his labor and that of his faithful help
meet, was rewarded with good results
and in an incredibly few years he was
top o the heap, so to speak, and owned
his lands and cattle and horses in fee
simple, with a home and all its com
forts, while children prattled about the
hearth and made life easier and
| brighter.
The years had wrought change in
the province and while the people
dreamed through the lethargy of great
prosperity, a man by the name of Hor
ace, a lawyer by profession and bour-
bon by faith, had been chosen as gov
ernor of the province. Horace was am
bilious and artful, and brought the
cunning and genius of his art to bear
upon the affairs of the people
One day during~the first reign of
Horace, Tillman received in the mails,
a parchment, and the seal and sigma
ture of Horace was upon it, and it was
lined up and down with rows of figures
which proved that Tillman and his
neighbOrs had been suffering loss of
81 cents an acre during all the years.
Tillman frowned and maryeled and
doubted, and his good wife said BE
ware of Horace; he's a deciever and a
fake and the truth is not in him; we
are happy and prosperous; let well
enough alone" and with gentle caress
she smoOthed the wrinkles from his
troubled brow.
a few days later an orator who was
hawking the merits of Horace and his
tribe held pow -wow;at the corners.
Tillman left his home and went to hear
him. When Tillman arrived, he rose
up in the meeting and inquired How
is it that have been losing 81 cents an
acre, though have earned my farm,
my stock and my home?" The orator
leered and smiled plying smile, full
of compassion fOrinnOCence and ignOr.
ance, and said "why, what you have
made has been upon the rise in your
land" Tillman reasoned no further,
forgetting that lands operated at a
loss decrease in value, but went forth
and Joined the tribes of Horace, and
put on a mantle of OilclOth, and a he'll
met, while his locks were oiled with
drippings from the campaign torch.
And he whooped her up for Horace,
louder and longer than the older ones
of the tribe, and when he came home
in the Starlit morning, DleaI-eyed and
hOarse from the orgies, he went to
bed with his boots on, while his poor
wife cried and would not be COmfOrted,
and declared her days were made mis-.
cradle by base usage and false interper-
tiers.
And Horace continued to reign in
the province during his second term
and during the first year of the reign
of Grover in the realm. Tillman, hay
ing joined the tribe of Horace voted
for Grover, who was fisherman of
Buzzard's Bay, and wore a red sash at
the barbecue in ratification OF the
election
The faithful wife and hired man had
worked proftably, while Tillman cam
paigned, and within six months of the
beginning of Growers reign had much
produce to turn off. He interviewed
the market reports and learned that
corn had slumped, pork had slumped
and that a slump all along the line was
the sensation. Tillman resolved to
borrow some money for awhile, but the
guardian of the treasure house couldn't
accommodate him, and Tillman was
sad. He fam would have filled his
belly with the stuff bowed in at the
barbecue and traded his campaign tog
gerry for deprecated currency, but met
the emergency by selling his produce
at the current prices, and giving IL al
invectiYe as it started into the markets
of the world.
Tillman went home and talked il
over with his faithful wife. She re
counted his losses during the reign Of
Horace and Grover, and the crimson
returned to her cheek as she registered
his resolve to return to the tribes o
, Lincoln and Harrison and Mckinley
! That night there was caucus of tn
! defeated tribes of Benjamin and Till
man was there in front seat, happ
in his return, and welcomed by tn
!, faithful friends who had mourned hi
bad break.
There was depression in the land an
a great roar among the people, an
when Horace heard the murmurings h
. fiattened his affidavit nose against
= plate glass pane in the capitol and ser
voice out through the province sa.
ing: Friends, dear friends, whom
have SO loved and who have loved m
! so; do not nominate me for a THU
. term. Let me retire to private life"
And there was wall in the ranl
of Horace for they knew that he wi
had been their Moses had become the
Dennis.