Tombstone epitaph., 1893-07-23
lmPsRvlous TO INFORMATION.
How an Explanation of the keeiy Motor
 Was Received.

Was Received.
 "A group of Chicago's young men were standing not long since near the corner of State and Madison streets discussing the many wonderful inv>a- tions of this wonderful age, when the conversation turned upon the kec.y y motor project of several years ago. As some of the younger members of the party could not exactly recall its pro posed workings, one who could began to explain 1t.
 "An old German laborer, but lately landed in the country, and, of course, speaking and understanding the Eng fish language very impcrfectly. paused moment, and leaned upon his shovel to listen. As he would occasionally catch the words, 'keely motor, kecly motor, an anxious, thoughtful eXprea- sion was seen to fit now and again across his honest old face. He seemed to become intensely interested in all that was said, and would occasionally ask some question concerning it. The narrator went over the ground quite carefully, telling how it was proposed. by a series of chambers, valves, pis- tons and compresSors, to run an engine from New York to San Francisco with a gallon or so of water without steam or fire.
 Our Teutonic friend gave earnest heed to it all, throwing his weight first upon one foot and then the other, and nodding his head in the affirmative jy way of approval. and then negatively as though pained at some portions of l.. H
 Ish dot possible" and showed much in dignation. Finally, after the whole thing had been carefully explained 10 him, taking perhaps an hours time, he took his old black pipe from his smouth, spit a couple of times or So, wiped his troubled brow upon the coat he carried on his arm, and expressed his opinion of the Keely motor about as follows: 'Ish dot so? I don't wood haf believed dot dere vas so mean q weller by Shco- kago! Und so dot weller he ksR It mVdder because she don't wood lct him go by de bignig over by Ogden bark hey? He Keel his poor old mVdGer' We'll, we'll. veil! l baet you dot weller must q vas gravy
 When the young man saw that he had fooled away so much time for naught he could hardly help violating the third commandment. Now when his friends wish to have a little fun at his expense some ore will casually in quire if it is true dat dot weller he iu' n.S 3; 'Si3srf' He says that such q man couldn't read 9 barber's sign without an interpreter."-M. E. Dutfie, in Chi cago Inter Ocean.
 Military Expedient.
 It is well to have definite plan of action in case of emergency and dan ger. Commandant Parquin, in his Souvenirs and Campaigns of an Old Soldier of the Empire" tells an anus ing story Illustrative Of the courage of the French infantry in Spain. He says says that the infantry had . courageous confidence in themselves which was fine. but sometimes led to disaster. One day he rep-imanded some soldiers that had allowed themselves to be left far behind their rregiment and the | cavalry of the rear guard. What should you do, he asked, If, separated | from the army as you are, a band of the cnemy's guerrillas surrounded you?'' They replied, gravely: Lieutenant, we should form . hollow square '" l There were three of them.-Youth' $ ' Companion.