davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
WHEN TO "GRAe A ROOT"

According to an Irish Soldier 1t Is When
a Man Is "Sure Enough" Drunk.
''What kind of liquor did he drink?'
''Whisky, SORT; nothin' in it," said
the witness. This was before court
martial held at Fort Yuma some time
ago.
"Whisl1y!" exclaimed the astonished
officer. ''For three hours you observed
the prisoner drinking whisky at inter
walls of twelve minutes apart and yet
you have the temerity to say to this
court martial that he did not become
intoxicated?"
"Ah, shure, major, it was suffers
whisky"
"No levity, sirr Numbered the major
''Do you know, sir, when a man is in
toxicated?"
GOV coorse Oh do"
''Then, according to your opinion, in
what condition must man to be con-
sidered intoxicated?"
''Shure, whin he's loaded, sorr'
''Tut, tutri testify calculated the
major "What I.want to know is what
the condition of the man must be, his
usefulness or helplessness, his ability
to walk or talk, his"
"Oh, well, that depinds," interrupted
Private Gum.
Depends on what?" excitedly cried
the major.
ION what We moight consither bein'
dhrunk," calmly responded the wit
ness.
That's exactly what l am laboring
to ascertain" said the major, as he
gazed at the ceiling, vainly trying to re-
cover his composure. when do you
consider a man intoxicated, or full, as
you term it? Give us your unhindered
ideas on the subject"
Faith, Oh will, major" slowly re-
sponded the witness, and after lower
ing his head and stealing a furtive
glance at his chunky" he raised his
ewes and said: GAS Oh obsurved befoor,
major, it der:nds intoirly on vans own
ideas. For mesilf Oh don't think a man
can be called downright dhrunk till he
topples over an has to grab root to
kape from fallin' off the earth"
Had the flagstaff fallen on the mil
itary justice shop it would not have
created more CONSERVATION than this
parting shot fired by Private Gum.
But offended pride soon reeled and tot
tered.
Well-preserved chunks of that laugh
are yet lodged in the crevices of the
plaster-cracked walls of the court room
at old Fort Yuma, and whoever visits
the post is not permitted to depart
without learning the origin of the by
gone saying, ''Grab root"
The phrase was adopted as byword
throughout the garrison, and its popu-
larity became widespread, but it did
not save Private Schultz. That warrior
was found guilty and got five and
ten" which is an abbreviated and IA
miliar way the boys have of expressing
the sentence, which reads as follows:
'And the court does therefore sentence
him, Private Schultz, company b, til
infantry. to forfeit to the United States
five dollars (S5) of his monthly pay and
to be confined at hard labor under
charge of the post guard for the period
Of ten QO) days.'-N. Y. Advertiser.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
GATES OPEN SUNDAY.

The Buildings May BE Closed. but There
VIII BE Plenty TO see at the Worlds
Fair.
CHICAGO, May 6.-That jackson park
will be opened next Sunday and the
payment of fifty cents will entitle any
member of the great public to entrance
Just as IT has for the past six months,
seems very well assured now. There
Will be no formal action taken and
there will be no official announcement
made. but the gates will be open. Su-
perintendent Tucker, of the bureau of
admission. understands that his force
is expected to work on Sunday and has
made all arrangements accordingly.
1t has been the rule in the past to
have gates open on the Sabbath, and
as there has been no order to make a
change. Tucker Will continue as usual
The condition that existed at jackson
park pefore May l will probably be the
condition next Sunday. The gates
will be open, but the exhibit buildings
will be closed.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
Tho Worlds Inn.

There can be no doubt that the "World's
Inn, )" under the management of Mr.. Chas. E
Leland, (of the noted Leland family of hotel
keepers) is one of the reliable exposition
hotels in Chicago. The appointments are
perfect, the location unequaled, and, in
view of the fact that the building is
absolutely fireproof, the rates 50 per
day for each person, two persons in a
room-are remarkably liberal. Scores of
hotels erected in the Worlds Fair terri
Inn, ;" on the other hand, affords security to
life and property. The location. directly OPP
posite the Fair grounds, and in close prox-
Unity to steam and street cars, adds TO its
attractiveness. Although it contains 500
commodious rooms, it is only three stories
high, an advantage that will be appreciated
at once. Rooms may now be secured by
mail or telegraph TO Chas. E. Leland, Man
ager, The Worlds Inn, Goth st. and Madison
Ave, Chicago.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
What Immigration Figures show.

New YORK. May Chicago may be
pleased to learn that during the month
of April 10,TS6 alien cabin passengers
arrived at this port. The syndicates
and shipping men say that there is go
ing to be rush to the worlds fair from
Europe In April last year only 5000
alien cabin passengers landed and in
the preceding April 1852. The immi-
grafton statistics of Ellis island for
April show that SO.261 Italians landed.
All other nationalities combined die
not come up to these figures. There
were 800 German ard 5,l49 Irish i'm
MIGRANTS
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
The Santa Ee Rnnfa

is the ideal line for your trip to Chicago
this summer. Thirty-six miles shorter than
any other line between Kansas City and
Chicago. No crossings at grade, fast time.
palatial vestibuled trains. free chair cars,
depot in Chicago in heart of city, rates as
low as anybody and accommodations bet
ter ANY additional Information desired
will be furnished upon application to
GEORGE W. HAGENBUCH. p. q. I. Agen {,
Santa Fe Route, Kansas City, Mo.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
WELL KNOWN IN EUROPE.

EIGHTEEN of the principal presents
given to Bismarck on his birthday are
valued at $4,000.
IsMAn PASTA, the ex-khedive of
Egypt. is said to be worth S25, 1000, 900,
and resides on the shores of the Bos-
phorus in a palace of great splendor.
DJEvAD PASTA. the grand vizier of
Turkey. refuses to keep a harem. He
has but one wife, who, ever since he
married her, many years ago, has pos
sessed his undivided affection.
PRINCESS MARIA. of Parma, is not
pretty, even for royal bride. She has
long, large countenance. disfgured by
a very long and substantial nose, and
it is ungallantly said that her face
looks like that of horse.
THE ladies of Dresden have been
holding q riding tournament, the
honors of the joust being won by a
young English girl, Miss Theresa
Brooks. Her final exploit was the
driving of q pair of horses tandem
while riding her own horse at full
speed.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
No Danger of Fever.

TOPEKA, Kan, May 6.-The live
stock sanitary commission was in ses-
sion here, the commissioners discussing
the Texas fever scare. The commission
is convinced that there is no further
danger from Texas cattle. The quar-
autine rules are being strictly enforced
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
When Travelling
Nhnfhnr

Whether on pleasure bent, or business, take
on every trip bottle of Syrup of Figs. as
it acts most pleasantly and effectively on
the kidneys, liver and bowels, preventing
fevers, headaches and other forms of sick
ness. For sale in 50 cents and 81 bottles by
all leading druggists.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
Coal Famine Threatened,

CLEVELAND, o., May Ga coal fam
inc is threatened in Akron because of
the miners strike. 1t is said that the
manufacturers have less than two
weeks supply, and the dealers, who
were wholly unprepared for the strike,
cannot supply them.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

"WERE you ever treated by physician l''
asked the benevolent lady after she had
listened to Sufferin' Simpkins' tale of sick
ness and poverty. "Only once, ma'am,"
said the old fraud; "that was when old Doc
Simmons asked US to take suthin'." Boston
Commercial Bulletin.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
Cavalry Pur,uInp RaDdl.s.

SAN FRANCISCO. May Cit is rumored
that the United States government will
take hand in pursuit of the notorious
bandits, Evans and Sontag. Troop b,
Fourth cavalry, Capt. Parker, has been
ordered to the vicinity of Visalia, where
the outlaws have been repeatedly seen.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

AUNT MALINDA-"Johnnie, what is thai
man on the street saylng!" Johnnie-''Can't
you understand one wordm Aunt Malinda
mo" Johnnie -"Weil, then it's ba
nanas. Inter Ocean.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
KANSAS CITIES.
Nearly One Hundred Towns in the State
with a Population Exceeding One Thou

Nearly One Hundred Towns in the State
with a Population Exceeding One Thou
sand-Comparative Growth.
Secretary Mohler, of the state board
of agriculture, has made public a state
nent of the population of the cities of
Kansas, which is the first population
statement that has been made for more
than a year. The figures given are the
returns of the assessors of 1892 and are
published as the population of the
cities named in the year 1892. Secre-
tary Mothers statement embraces
figures for all cities in the state having
population of LOCO or over, of which
there are now ninety-seven. Kansas
City. Kan, is still the leading city,
having a population of $1,000
gain of 1850 over the year
1890. Topeka is the second city, with
S3. 6S5 people-a gain of 1,s76. Wichita
and Leavenworth are almost tied for
third place. Wichita by this latest re-
port has 20, 92S-a falling off in two years
of 2.572. Leavenworth closely follows
her with 20, SO2-a gain in two years of
SPA
The following is the population of all
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
An Appeal for Assistance,

The man who is charitable to himself will
listen to the mute appeal for assistance
made by his stomach, or his liver, in the
shape of divers dyspeptic qualms and un.
easy sensations in the regions of the gland
that secretes his bile Hostetter's Stomach
Bitters, my dear sir, or madam-as the case
may be-is what you require. Hasten 10
use if you are troubled with heartburn,
wind in the stomach, or Lote that your skin
or the whites of your eyes are taking a sal
low hue.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

MAMMA-"Look at Kittie; she keeps late
hours, and see the rings under her eyes.
Daughter-"Yes. but just look at the ones on
her fingers, too."-Inter Ocean.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

BRIDGET-"What is the result of casting
bread upon the waters.' Brooks-"In oul
house it returns the second day as pud
ding. "-Christlan at Work.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

TAKEN as a hole the Mammoth cave is
fully entitled to rank with the wonders OF
the world.-Buffalo Courier.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

DIDN'r UNDERSTAND FIGURES. - Miss
Blanche (parting for months)-"Perhaps l
shall never again appear on your horizon. " ;,
Van Guller-"My horizon! do you think
own the earth l"-Judge.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

HALE's Honey of Horehound and Tar re-
ieves whoOping cough.
Pixies Toothache Drops Cure in one minute
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

To HARROW ones feelings is not the most
profitable way of culivating an acquaint-
ance.-Roston Transcript
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

THE baId-headed man is blessing in more
ways than one. He never gets his hair cut
on Saturday nighL-Du Bots Courier.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

BEEcHAMs PILLS quickly cure sick head
ache. weak stomach, impaired digestion.
constipation, disOrdered liver. etc.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

"YoU are not entirely French, are you,
Count Pollyvool" "Oui, madame. / am
French through and through. Why do you
asks" 81 am certain you have Roman
e''-Harper's Bazaar.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

IT doesn't always require big mouthed
man to make broad observation-disclosures
Plaindealer.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

THE REASON WHY.-Raz-"Say Jeems,
what do yo' wear dat short coat outside
fo'f'' Jeems-"Do yo' s'pOse Use gwine TO
wear it inside so people CANT see itl''-
Smith, Gray & Co.'S Monthly.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

There is only one medicine for Ca
tarrh worthy the name. Dozens are
advertised, but only the proprietors of
DIR. Sage's Catarrh Remedy say this
eff we can't cure you, Well pay you
$500 in cash
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

Mr.. d. w. HUGHES, of Mexico, Mo-,
possesses one of the few patents issued
by the confederate government. 1t
was for breech plug for cannon.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12

In every "female complaint irregularity
or weakness, and in every exhausted condi-
ton Of the female system-if it ever fails
back
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
u. s. Government
Baking Powder Tests.

The report of the analyses of Baking Powders, made
by the u. S. Government chemical Division, Ag1
Dept) shows the Royal superior to all other powders
and gives its eavenng strength and the strength of each
of the other of tartar powders tested follows
LEAvENING GAS.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
THE WAY SHE LOOKS

He WAY SHE LOOhS
troubles the woman who
is delicate, rundown, or
overworked. She's hOl-
low checked, dull eyed,
thin, and pale, and it
worries her.
Now, the way to look
well is to be well. And
the way to be well, If
you're any such woman,
Is to faithfully use DR..
Pierce's Favorite Pre-
scription- That IS the
only medicine that's
guaranteed to build up
woman's strength and to
cure wornan's ailments.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1893-05-12
ROYAL, Absolutely Pure,

Royal Baking Powder is absolutely pure, and of
greater leavening power than any other powder.
Evening journal., 1893-03-13

year Of Wesley M F. Church closed last
evening, with missionary anniversary
by the Sunday School. The report Of
the Secretary, II, r. Dunn was read
giving the amount contributed by each
class last Sunday for missions, which
amounted to 1921 Of, two Of the classes
giving nearly a hundred dollars each.
Nathaniel Smithers, Jr,, recited ''lhe
Gospel Train" He Is a little fve-year-
old boy and his recitation was one Of
the most striking features Of the pro-
gram. lt was spoken in a clear, audible
tone and expression was given TO every
line. James H. Hughes, Esq, was to
have made the speech of the evening,
but owing to a severe sore throat was pre-
vented from doing so. A solo very
beautifully sung by Miss Mamie Lewis,
Nearer 10 Thee, was greatly enjoyed.
After few remarks by the pastor,
Rev. DR.. Murray, the doxology was sung
and the meeting dismissed The church
was filed to It's full capacity and all
seemed to enjoy the exercises.
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
Young Toils Enjoy ThemseIve..

An enjoyable surprise party was
rendered Miss Iva Miller, at her home
900 East Eleventh street few evenings
ago, the occasion Of her fifteenth birth
day. The happy young folks enjoyed
themselves playing games and dancing
until late hour when they were
ushered into the dining room and
splendid repast was served. Miss
Miller was the recipient Of many gifts.
Among those present were: Misses Iva
Miller, Helen Mask, Rosa Thompson.
Gertie Holley, Anna Draper, Helen and
Maud Kilmer, Ella McCloskey, Addie
Norris, Omah Dugan. Josephine Mckay,
May Ward Messrs Charles Price, Charles
wilkins, Sherwood Thompson, Ray
Hart William Mask, George Mckay.
Robert and Addie Lang, Maxwell Jester,
Mr.. Corvan, Mr.. and Mrs. Lyman, Mrs.
Lang, Miss Lang, William Lang, Miss
Liena and Audrey Miller, L. Miller, Mr..
Campbell, Mrs Mckay and Mr.. and Mrs.
Miller.
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
THEY STOLE A BRASS SWIVEL.
Detectives Mcyey and Witsn Cnptur,
Two Members Of Tough Gang.

Detectives Meyey and Witsn Capture
Two Members Of a Tough Gang.
Thomas Mullin aud Peter Carroll were
arraigned before Magistrate Sasse this
morning on the charge Of larceny. De
tectives McVey aud Witsil arrested
Mulnn last Thursday evening, and yes
terday Carroll was captured Ia the gang
Of trespassers who we're feastiug in
Richardson's woods They were charged
with stealing a brass swivel from the
Philadelphia. Wilmington and Baltimore
railroad on March l. which they sold q
pawnbroker The magistrate held
them 10 $500 bail each for the Court ol
General Sessions.
These young men are members Of o
gang Of toughs that are loafers about the
vicinity of Front and West streets and
have been for a long time giving the
police authorities trouble. Should they
be convicted, their presence will be
missed In their old haunts much to theiI
chagrin, but a relief to the residents.
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
INDIAN ENCOUNTERS.
More Advices From the North
west This Morning.
TRIBES STILL IN WARFARE THERE

Indians Board an Incoming Steamer to
Search for Kitkatlahs who Had Re
Gently 1Iassacred Some of Their Tribe
on Sorrow Island-Gunboats May BE
Sent Out.
VANCOUVER, B. c.. March 13.-The
steamer Coquitlam arrived from the
north yesterday morning bringing
further news of the recent Indian
troubles. A canoe full of armed Bella
Bella Indians was met by the steamer,
The Indians were evidently bent upon
mischief and in search of Kitkatlshs
who had recently massacred some Of
their tribe on Sorrow Island.
Thinking that some of their enemies
were being harbored on the Coquitlam
they boarded her and made search for
their quarry. 1t was learned that the
two tribes have since had an encounter
and several were killed and wounded.
No report has yet been received from the
Indian agent who is investigating the
affair.
Should his report prove that tribal
warfare exists it may be necessary to
send gunboat to enforce order. The
Indians of that section are noted foI
their warlike proclivities, and there is
no telling where the feud will end If the
authorities do not intervene to prevent
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
PRAIRIE FIRES RAGING.
One Young Couple Burned So Badly That
They Cannot Live.

One Young Couple Burned So Badly That
They Cannot Live.
GARDEN CITY, Kan March 13 Wide
spread and destructive prairie fires have
been raging in this vicinity for the past
two days. Saturday, Frank Gruner, hv
ing ten miles east of here, lost all his
buildings, household goods, farm imple
ments, etc, saving nothing but the
clothing of himself and family. J. NJ
Dettrower, living ten miles north, was
equally unfortunate.
Three school houses in the north and
east portions of the county were also
burned and many farmers have lost
large stacks of hay and other property. 4
Yesterday a strong wind was blowing
from the southwest ana last night word
reached here that the farm of Mr. Ander.
son, seven miles southeast of here, was
swept bare by the flames and both An
derson and his wife so badly burned that
the husband soon died and his wife can
live but a few hours Extensive fires
were raging last evening in the north
west. east and south, and it is feared
damage will still be done
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
spirited Horses Become Maddened.

Two fine black horses attached to a
carriage became frightened on West
street yesterday at noon and ran down
that street across the railroads at Water
street into the entrance to the boatyard
of the Harlan and Hollingsworth Com
pany. Here a post supporting the gates
was broken and the carriage was badly
damsged The front wheels and the
tongue were smashed. The team was
the property of @. Truman Wallace. Of
No, 8i3 West Sixth street. This morning
a horse driven by William Jack and the
property of W. G. Martin. ran away and
damaged the rear wheels Of the open
vehicle in which he was riding.
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
PERSONAL PARAGRAPHS.

Mrs. John Gee is visiting friends in Phila-
delphia.
W NJ. Truitt Of Milford was in this city
yesterday afternoon.
DR.. J. NJ. Twilley OF Dover was in VII
mingtOn this morning.
Clement Il. Lippincott, recently Of Bristol
Pa, has removed to this city.
George Peterton OF Middletown spent sun
day " th friends in this city.
Miss Addie Macklin Of this city has retu. nee
from a visit TO friends in Philadelphia.
Thomas Reeves Of Delaware City has re
turned home from visit TO friends a.
PhmniVville.
Wilmingtonians registered at New Yorl
hotels are: ~ Hastings, Hoffman House; W
IA. Crosby, Broadway Central; A. l. Barber
Hotel savory: n. Morse, " indsor; and f. +
Slocum, ST. Denis.
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
Assassinated BY a Desperate.

MEMPHIS, Tenn, March 13.-Rufus
Haywood, a colored planter was assas
sinated by Lee Walton notorious negro
desperado, Saturday night at Nitta
Yuma, Miss. After robbing his victim
Walton fed but was run down by blood
hounds and captured yesterday morning
was being guarded by the sheriff until
the arrival of the train for Rolling Fork,
the county seat. Just before the train
arrlNeu moo ol oVU negroes over
derer to the scene of his crime where he
was hanged to limb and his body filed
with bullets
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
DID IT WITH A LITTLE HATCHET.
John AppIeby Cut Tree for His
Neirhbor and Was Fined for the Act
This Morning.

John Appleby Cut Tree for His
Neirhbor and Was Fined for the Act
This Morning.
John Appleby was arraigned in the
Municipal Court this morning on the
charge OF cutting down a shade tree IN
the yard of John Spring, at Eleventh
and Church streets. Testimony proved
that the act was malicious and Judge
Ball fined him S. and costs.
William Geers, colored. was charged
with assault aud battery on Mrs. A.
Wilson and Edward j. Riley The pros.
ecuting witnesses we're not present and
the case was continued until 60 morrow
morning The prisoner was held In 800
bail for his appearance.
The cases Of Claude Hilderman and
Clarence Smith for policy writing, and
that Of William Johns, colored, for
assault and battery, were continued
until TO morrow morning
Walter Lawrence was an unwilling
witness against Charles f. Baker whom
he had caused to be arrested on Saturday
night for assault and battery. He could
mot remember at the present time,
what happened. He was positive that
the prisoner in the dock was not III,
man whom he supposed had struck him
Owing to the loss OF his memory and his
opinion that he was mistaken In th,
identity Of the man, Baker was dismissed
He and Lawrence left the courtroom
together, seemingly friends
Evening journal., 1893-03-13
mr. Giadstone's Illness only slight.

LONDON, March 13.-Mr. Gladstone is
confined to BED with cold He became
indisposed while paying a visit to Hamp-
stead, about four miles from London on
Saturday and was slightly feverish. On
returning to Downing street in the
morning he Immediately went TO bed
which is his usual remedy for any indis
position. A bulletin issued for public
information says his illness is slight
While her husband is i'll in Downing
street Mrs. Gladstone is recruiting from
an attack of Influenza at Hawarden.