Grand Rapids herald. [volume] (Grand Rapids, Mich.) 1892-1959, 1893-11-12

gardener that l had just gone through
the business and could give her points.
50 be and ! are planting the bald places
on her lawn. The weather has been SO
dry, every one says. that lawns have ali
suffered. Still il doesn't seem 10 be so
blistering dry 70 me. i have never al
lowed myself 10 be five minutes from my
umbrella since l came, and the poor
crossing sweepers VINO keep the mud of
80 one can get ON the other side win my
sympathy and keep me out Of change.
III fact, instead of changing flags | am
changing sovereigns, in the language
OF a Texan whom l met on this side.
Clarence, my valet. is still with me-
He points ont what | ought TO eat and
then eats IL. I certainly never saw "A
man with such cropping for food, such
yearning for groceries, cereals and en-
dogenous asparagus.
He took vacation the other day and
went into tho country about eight or ten
miles, which simply takes one into
muddier part Of London, bat he came
horne 70 his meals. and after eating out
Of house and home returned TO his play.
1t is very hard for an American gentle
man 10 know how to treat valet. I've
had Clarence two weeks now, and all
that he has done SC far was 10 reach MP
my back for q suspender that had escaped
me- He said he could shave me when
engaged him. and he could if did not
regret it 50 after he did it. dc got me
in chair upholstered with horse hair
cloth. and which fell ont Of twice while
he was working my face into place by
means Of my nose. then he shaved me
with u razor tha' was captured during
the crimean war. and l can truly say
that Plum Levi. Patton avenue, Ashe-
vile. North Carolina, L. S. ~. i'll his
best flights of genius could not approach
Clarence Plum might have been as
gifted in the matter Of torture. brt he
never had the preceding generations Of
that sort Of thing TO help him.
I've good notion to retire Clarence
for he has got after all degree of appe-
tite and dignity which make people mis-
take him for the gentleman If the two.
Possibly rs partly. TOO. because I'm -
years younger than be aud naturally
more frisksoiHe and debonair.
The second morning after took these
lodgings did not get my boots tsome-
times called shoes) from the blacksr
down stairs. and so went down myself.
Tho bl.cker eaid that he did not black
servants SHOES He mistook me for Clar-
ence.
A kind Creator gave Clarence dignity
to make MP for his gnawing hunger.
let hiia eat with me. for | actually
suffer when | havo 20 eat alone. The
kind. hospitable Englishmsn looks out
for my dinners. but the breakfasts are
especially lonesome without Clarence.
He has done vrleting for others, among
them an American and two Australians.
lie likes me the BEST. he says. because
| am a bettey prov.der. As be sort 81 Ill
reefs my diet so that | won't get the
goui. which threatened me for ~ DAYS
aud nights. be makes suggestions which
suit him
For breakfast we take sole. with
boiled egg. toast. coffee and possibly
some liver and bacon, with apollinaris,
which IS fivepence the bottle. Then for
lunch at 30 we have beautiful mack
erel-not a fossil mackerel. with his
bosom full q brine. but n tender. blue
eyed mackcrci with a radiant complex
ion aud genuine good feeling Then
big. Juicy steak. with brown gravy. Ok.
SIR. me eycs. but that steak AMI that
gravy make England look good 70 rae.
ard | am willing "a lee hv zsmes he by
cones Then thsre is fine old stiiion
cheese. wifn via used % cali crack
sr. but now a hiscuit. Ash celery and
brussels sprouts. with bottle II Bar
cundy. because water here j. only u..cl
externally.
Then ~ go "a have dinner hive
The nsnle q Il Tinz for 10 and Clarence
eats s.. Il y fine broilei FISH after
some anchovies apd Pea seup. Thoa
i1nt and a bir3 with bottle - Mos,I,e
and SWEETS Sweets are mostly tarts
I've revsr eaten che. Fasy look hike a
rse3aiiion 10 paste spa R1cseberry. sni
I've aften tlosah' that II har mos; graz
cfous majesty taeqree ~ ares. flrrsiu.
empress ~ lnfia an tsfanr &c f-.anl
uanid scne lsr winnie In w. at aer
ptide fer ainnar deearste IRE wifh ore q
th-sn. I'd wear e ~ ny brssst forever.
saw S'r E.iwia Arm l,i a few dsssaTs
10 f1etsaly nd sha - sFaa 1ef s1~
~ fva ~ hni iH TIE
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