The Coeur d'Alene press. (Coeur d'Alene, Idaho) 1892-1907, 1893-03-11
esrs euaoLAas.
Farmer stei,bips and His Wife 0se .
Terrible sears from strsngers.

Farmer steb,iss and His Wife Get .
Terrible Scare from strasgers.
Farmer Fri Stebbins, fast asleep after
bis hard days work In the field, was sud.
denly reused TO semi-consciousness by q
loud crash. just what or where the noise
was did not appear, and. after little vain
listening for further disturbances, the tired
farmer sank again into Elumber. A mo.
ment later be wins once more ronsed-this
time most thoroughly so--by his wife's
voice whispering hOarseiy In his ear: "Erii
Erisi wake upl There's somebody down
suiler trampin' roundi Don't you hear
umi"
Fri did hear some one moving somewhere
10 the lower part Of the house, and be in.
stantly slid out OF bed ready to do battle.
Somebody In the cellar! He'd show 'em
thing or two worth remembering" With
these warlike thoughts flashing through
his mind the farmer slipped on bis trousers
and stole softly down stairs TO the kitchen.
The noise In the cellar sounded very loud
now. but not at all like trampiDg; rather
II wins a combination OF ssufiiing and
scratching with queer stopping sound, a.
OF some one padding in water.
Fri WAS taking down bis loaded gun from
Its hooks On the wall just as another crash
sounded through the house. This time the
sound was unmistakable; a pan of milk
had been knocked from the table TO the
stone floor. The angry farmer cooked bis
gun, hurried to the cellar door, threw il
open and then-stOpped short.
The bright moonlight streaming In Al
the outside door Of the cellar showed five
or six half grown pigs making feast OF
the milk. which was streaming over the
door.
Fri at once understood the situation
The pigs, which were pastured In the or.
ehard about the house, had found their
way to the outer door. pushed il open and
entered the cellar. The only thing to dc
was 10 drive them out.
So, putting his gun back on the hooks,
Fri started to eject the intruders.
Now IL any one terrestrial quadruped ID
harder TO drive than all Others. that quad.
ruped is a pig. However. as the farmer
was experienced in pig driving and thor.
oughly in earnest, he soon got rid of all
except one brute that steadfastiy refused
70 90. He would charge full toward the
open door. bat when within a few feet OF
1t would suddenly dart aside and rush
back To the far,best corner of the cellar.
When routed from this lurking place be
would repeat his former maneuver with
Just enough variation TO render impossible
any attempt 10 stop him.
After three or four such experiences Fri
began TO get excited. He would have beaten
the pig. but he had no weapon Of any sort.
Al last. however. he got near the brute
and, raising his foot, kicked him heavily in
the rear. Alas for Fri. he had quite for.
gotten that he WAS barefooted.
As a result he nearly broke all the toes
Of his right foot The kick, moreover,
frightened the poor pig SO badly that be
suddenly made bolt up the stairs toward
the kitchen.
Now II happened that Dame Stebbins,
armed with an old boot and carrying q
tallow candle, was just coming to her hus-
bands assistance. There was Il fine com.
bina,ion Of screams. squeaks and gruuts,
followed by several heavy bumps, as the
the woman and pig rolled together down
the stairs and into the puddle of milk
below
At this ludicrons sight Fri burst into
laughter. whereupon his indignant spouse
soundiy berated him for his hardness OF
heart, declaring that he would laugh IL she
were 10 break her neck
While the farmer was pacifying his
angry wife prudent piggy slipped quietly
out OF the door and made good his escape.
youths Companion.