The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1893-10-12
The JONESES' TELEPHONE.
BY ANNIE HowELLs FREcHETTE.

/ look admlrlngly at the new telephone
''By all means. 1t Is here, and il
may as well be doing some one a ser
vice as to stand idle-and | like t.
feel that friend isn't afraid to ask {
favor OF me now and then. Yes,
suppose that telephone will save Us
many car fare during the year You
can use 1t to do your marketing in
stead OF tir.ng yourself out and wait
ing half day three or four times a
week, and days when forget things,
think how easy it will be to telephone
and remind newly, it will entirely
DO away with the need for strings &C
tie around my fingers.
Thus hope and kindly intentions
presided at the inauguration OF the
JOneses' telephone.
Three months passed. and the great
invention had carried much informa-
tion-useful and otherwise-not only
to its owners, but the entire neighbor
hood as well. There was even days
when the Joneses questioned whether
they were not running public tele-
phone, SO often did the bell ring. It
Is true it had not quite paid for itself
In the anticipated saving Of car fares
and finger strings, still it had certain
ly been a great comfort, and "Well,
we'll just face the music and call it
luxury" said Jones, as lie put away
the receipt for his first quarters aent,
''especially for our friends" he added,
with just touch of bitterness.
Scarce twenty four hours after this
philosophical stand was taken Mrs.
Jones, who was rather light sleeper,
was aroused by a violent and pro
longed ringing. 1t was 6 o'clock and
Sunday morning "a day and hour Us
ually dedicated to undisturbed slum-
Der. After brief debate in her mind
as TO whether the house was on fire
or the milkman was ringing. she real
lied that it was the telephone bell.
She hastily donned slippers and gown
and ran down stairs. In reply to her
interrogative "Yes?" (lirs. Jones
could never bring herself to say
''HellonO came the following in meas
ured and clerical tones:
1T is Mr.. Brown-Rev. Mr. Brown
speaking"
"Oh, yes" instinctively covering
her half-clad feet III the folds of her
gown.
81 believe you live near Rev. Mr.
Smith and are a member of his
church?"
Yes"
"Will you be good enough to send
to him and ask if he can send his
curate to Mr.. Browns early service
for him, as he is called away, [ would
be glad if you would send Immediate
l., as l must have his answer in fiji
teen minutes. Thank you. Please
call up 10O1," and snap went the telc-
phone.
Mrs. Jones looked at her deshabille
and reflected that her one servant was
at mass and would not be back for an
hour. She went slowly up stairs.
Tom, Tom dear. wake up"
"What is it?'
REV. Brow is telephoned to know
whether Rev. Smith can send his
curate to take his early service"
"N ell, what in the world have | got
to do with the peddling out of early
servicesp snapped Jones as he turned
and shook up his pillows.
He has to have an answer to his
message within fifteen minutes"
well, let Susan take it." settling
back comfortably.
But Susan has gone to mass"
''And / suppose that means that [
am to be turned out of my bed at day
break, and canter half a mile," cried
James in high and excited voice as
he bounced from his bed and began
to grope sleepily for his clothes. His
toilet was made amidst grumblings of
''Confound their early services, why
can't they stay in bed like Christians,
instead of prowling about, and send
ing men outin the chilly morning air,
etc, etc
Jones temper was soured for the
day. and that night as he was wind
ing his watch he said severely, Jane,
I'm going to draw the line at deliver
ing messages. Tom, Dick and Harry
can come here and below into the
telephone until they are hoarse, but I'll
be switched if I'll be messenger boy
any longer"
But messages come and go, increas-
ing rather than decreasing in fre
quency People in the neighborhood
fell into the hadit Of saying to friends
in different parts of the city when
leaving a question open. Just tele-
phone me when you make up your
mind. Haven't a telephone myself,
but the Joneses have. and they are
very obliging about letting me use it."
SO the fact that telephone was
owned by an obliging family circulat-
ed almost as rapi dly as if it had been
a lie.
There were times when Mrs. Jones
hadn't the face to ask Susan to stop
her work and carry these messages,
so she carried them herself trying
to keep up her self-respect by com
bining an errand of her own in the
same direction. There We're a few
messages, however. which remained
forever Indignantly shut within the
telephone-as, for instance, that Of
the little girl which came in shrill,
piping voice:
Mrs. Jones will you send your
servant over to Mrs. Graham's to ask
Milly where she got that perfectly de
hcious delight she sent me the other
day-and tell her to be quick about ii
please for am waiting"
And another which came in chuffy
distorted, conversational English, reg
ular 'chappie' English, very hard tc
understand, but which she finally
Strengthened out into: L say there
aw-oh--is that Mrs. nes?-Sorry
to trouble you-but would you be sc
awfully good as to send word to Mrs
Bruce -aw-that I'm awfully cut NJ
about it, but | won't be able to dine
there to night Aw-I wouldn't trouble
you, but its so awfully hot | can't &C
around to explain to her-yOu know
Il. II