The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-11-15
SARGE PLUNKETT.
The Old HAN Receivers from Long Spell
of Sickness.
Atlanta Constitution.

QeVlllSn, Ike uSGeT 1eel-CHOuSH
made some mighty serious promises
when [ thought [ was a-goner.
When an old timer gets pretty sick
he wants doctor and wants him bad,
and then as he grows worse and worse
he wants preacher and wants him
bad, but it's curious how quick we
forget all this after we are we'll again
and drift back into the old ruts-hang
the doctor and hang the preacher, is
more than apt to be the feeling.
Brown uster play off every sick"
every time he got right mad. This
was his way of pouting-he'd die. l
have known him to die several times
and it is told on him that the last time
he took one Of these "possum" spells
the doctor walked in and told the
family that it was necessary to cut out
his heart.
eyes" said the doctor, "his heart
must be cut out, and I'll do itr'
''The h-ll you will !" said Brown,
as he opened his eyes and unfolded
his hands. Brown never "possumed'
again.
These old spells Of Browns went
against me they kept me frem get
ting the attention that | deserved
my folks and Browns folks and all
my neighbors were used to death-or
mighty sick folks when they were not
as sick as it was thought they we're
and so the neglect. But after SO long
time I got 'em interested. They
saw there was no "possuming" in my
case and they stirred. We had three
doctors during the time. The first
one that came give me thoroug h ex-
animation. He thumped me, and felt
my pulse and looked at my tongue,
and then set and studied till he knew
all about my case. Heprescribed and
the prescription cost me $1.5O to get
it filled. I took three spoonfuls of
this before he decided that it was not
the thing at all, and another s1.50 had
to 60 for another prescription. 1
think got two spoonfuls of this down
before he decided that another sort of
medicine, powder, was the thing and
another 81. so had to go. he was just
about deciding that he had been mis-
taken again and that we might begin
to hustle for another $3.50, when the
old oman politely informed him that
we would try another doctor. This
was brave in the old oman and | love
her for it.
The next doctor thumped me and
rolled me and looked at my tongue,
and then looked wise and examined
the other doctors medicine on the
mantelpiece and smiled to himself,
and wrote four words that cost 81 at
the drug store, and the first dose 1
took of it throwed me into spasms
and throwed the old oman into the
worst furry I've seed her in for many
day. The old oman was right in
for putting on her bonnet and going
over to give the doctor fits, but some
of the neighbors remarked that the
doctor maybe wanted to get me into
spasms, and then cure the spasms,-
which sorter pacifed her, but the
doctor wanted to scribble few more
words to give the druggist few more
dollars and he had to 60, and then the
third, last and worst Of them all came
to see what he could do.
This last doctor went through the
regular humping process, looked wise,
walked up and examined the medicines
of the other two and deliberately
threw them in the fire. AS this last
doctor destroyed the medicine he
turned to Mrs. Brown and told her it
was a wonder I had not died under
such medicine, said a good deal about
young doctors being such fools, but
wound up by putting 81 more into the
drug store. This last old fellow raised
me, he says, but it's my notion he is
the worst of the gang. He wrapped
me up in about a yard of sticking
plaster and never said a word about
how to get the stuff off. The old
oman and Browns wife was three
days and nights peeling the plaster. off
of me amid terrible groans and grima-
ces; and then the old fool doctor
laughed fit to kill himself when I told
him of the great labor and agony, and
informed me that the thing should
have been well dampened with hot
water before removing. I wish some
of you would just try getting one Of
these plasters off-Without Wetting-
it's funny.
never had much experience about
sickness, and knew but little about
sick rooms, but I know q good deal
now. It was mighty kind in the
neighbors to come in and set up, and
all they did was meant kindly, but
when Sister Smith would whisper to
Sister Brown and remark that "the
old man can't stand it much longer, y
che is going just like old man Dixie
went, F." wonder if he's prepared, I"
when such as this, I say, is whispered
all about you during the night, it
makes the cold chills run up and down
your backbone. | am surprised at
ever getting we'll, for l heard enough
about myself to have scared me to
death without the other things.
These old gossipy women are not all
the ones who can make sick man
miserable. A sample of what the
men who sat up with me talked about,
as they thought me laying there insen-
sible, is enough to satisfy any one
that imprudent talk in sick room is
not confined to the females alone.
''Where will they bury him at p
says Bill Jones to Sam Smith.
''Down in Pike" answered Sam.
"Long ways" remarked another.
eyes," says Bill Jones, ''pretty
good distance, but the old oman is
scared the doctors will get the old man
if they bury him about here"
"Them medical colleges are getting
to be thunder put in Sam Smith,
"but I don't see why they should take
honest people from their graves when
it is so easy to get 'stiffs of the chain,
gang persuasion
''Nor me nuther," said afellow who
had come out from Atlanta along with
Bill Jones.
At this the crowd hunched each
other and told the town visitor that
they expected he was out spying now,
| lust to inform the body snatchcrs