The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1893-01-29
HADN,T HEARD OF THE FAIh.
Dennis Finn Wants No Moro OF the Column
HAN Exposition.

Dennis Finn Wants NO MORO Oh tho O"i"m-
bian Exposition.
TWAS bioh noon. and in the basement OF
tha building i'm course Of construction the
men had laid aside their hods, and after
disposinQ of the contents OF their dinner
] nails were smoking the clay pipe of con-
, tertmsnt Terence Murphy took his short
Mn. from his mouth as he addressed Den
mis- Finn.
the WORLDS fairf" .,
"To the Worlds fair. is it, ye say9 And
fbwat moight that be-the WORLDS fairy''
"Sure. an haven't yer hear spake O tn
WORLDS Colombian expzshn, as they
say"
Come of, now. Mike. Come away Git
ont o. that wild them dude words. Fhwat's
tn plain English av tn blarney ye're givin
mes'
Faith, man, it's no blarney I'm giyin
We. Don't We read fhwat they tells IN tn
newspapers, Dinnyf"
"Y' know dom we'll don't read tn stuff
have noe work. to do. tell ye I've heard
of no fair"
"Well, there's to be fair"
"In pwhat county is it, Mike"
an no county, begobl They'd be afther
havin it in Ch'kawgy."
I'm Ch'kawgy is it, you say' An will 1t
be loike tn good fairs in the ould country
Arrah, now, if it is, you'll see me in the
very midst of it"
NO, no; but you are ignr'at, Dinny, me
man. The great Colombian exp'z'shn's
goin TO be divil Of a. institootion, tn loikes
ay which no one ever saw before, before
P'haps yo've hear tell of tn stockyards in
Ch'kawgy"
9Th place where they kill tn pigs, is it'"
9TH same place. It's moiles an moiles
In tn circumforation."
IAN is it there they'd be for holdin tn
fair?"
"Indade it is. Every fair has pigs, Dinny,
an tn Ch'lsawgy fair as bein tn greatest
in tn woorld, must have more pigs than any
other fair before So they said as t would
be cheaper to take tn fair to tn pigs than
tn pigs to tn fair, an they built tn fair
grounds all round tn pigs They're buildin
yet, Dinny."
IAN will they have nothin but pigs in
Chkawgy?"
mo, indade, but they'll have piece Of
everything in the woorld. They'll have
lagoonys an gondoolys an piazzys an porti-
coolys an men an women from all over the
earth'-
Faith, but where did ye get the Frinch
lingo bout tn lagoonys"
Sure, it's all in the newspapers"
IAN phwat the divil's lagoony"
you don't know phwat's lagoonyi Did
ye never hear o. pstchouli"
Oh n L.
he bossin tn fair'"
mo, ye choomp, he amt bossin tn
fair. Ye have no edycashun, Dinny. TIL
stuff they call patchoulfs perfume. The
old oman uses it av Sunday when she
goes to tn choorch."
"A perfume, is it' An is the lagoony
perfume"
Faith, an they tell me 1t Is not. But av
yez 20 to tn fair ye can see for yerself,
Dinny"
"Well, I don't care much for tn lagoony |
1 much prefer tn pigs. They say tn
Ch'kawgy pigs foine class o. pig"
True, Dinny, is 1t has foine chance"
IAN fwhen is tn fair to bep
"Oh, not till tn comm summer"
IAN is it now ye'd be botherin me wild |
tn Worlds fair that amt to be till tn next
summer"
1T is that"
"Well, I'd have ye g understand, wild yer
monstrous talk about exp'z'shns an la
goonys, that fwhen ye be talkin to Dinny |
Finn yez might best confne your oratora,
tions to tn present day. An there goes tn
whistle now l want to hear no more Of
your Worlds fair. New York Sun