Passaic City record., 1893-01-28
PITH AND POINT.

1 ILL AMI lUlu IL
Opera bouffe--A French duel.
A tramp steamer-T The station-house
lodging ROOM
A reformer is man who is sure that
his interest is the public interest,"
Puck.
It Is easier to restore smashed egg
shell than to bring back confidence once
lost.-Truth.
The milk of human kindness would be
good deal richer if it wasn't SKINNED
so often.-Puck.
When ship begins to pitch the
passengers all are anxious to make
home run. Chicago Inter Ocean.
@Why do you love me, Love. 50 muchw
She pouted. unused, then said ssBecauseFs r
And was satisfied.
Puck.
Mrs. Plume-.sDon't you think my
new bonnet is perfect dream. Plume
-ssYes; and mighty bad one -
Puck.
It is curious how much faster street
car humps along when you are running
after it than when you are riding on It.
Richmond Recorder.
judge What is your age, madam2n
Aged Witness-ssI have seen thirty
seven summers" Judge-ssHow long
have you been d2"-Texas Siftings.
"Well, said the man who handed his
last cent to the lawyer, 81 suppose turn
about is fair play. broke the law and
the law broke me. .n-W Washington Star.
How many sudden griefs would fit
Far from this world of blues,
II all umbrellas had to fit =
The same as overshoesl
w ashington Star.
There are too many singers III the choir
VINO do not know any more about the
gospel they sing than the town pump
does about the taste of water.--Rsm's
Horn.
Willie Papa, someone has invented
a magazine gun. What kind is that2r
Papa (refectively)-ssI must be one
that goes eff once month. -Pittsburg
Bulletin.
One good way to discourage the man
who thinks he has an aptitude for saying
funny things is to call him back soberly
and induce him to explain his jokes. W
Somerviile Journal.
Mrs. Youngwife Tom has dread.
full disposition I fiEd" Mother--ssW What
does he do2n Mrs. Youngwife--"Do.
why be never gets mad when do. -
Chicago Inter Ocean.
ssWhere are you staying2 I'll call and
see you.' ssDon't. You'll only think
the worse of me when you see my sur
roundings." ssOh, my dear fellow,
that's impossible, you know. Punch.
A conflict is approaching. it comes nearer
every day;
| The foe no longer seeks the aid Of stealth:
! And we wonder which will conquer in the
world-i important fray,
| The bacillus or the officer of health.
--Washingtca Star
-lIr. Grigson-"I wonder what Old
General Bulledogge can sea IN that
odiously made-up Blanche Dupuisa"
Miss GoIightly-ssOh, the old war horse
likes the smell of powder, I guess. -"
Judy.
Herbert-ssIf she loves him, why
doesn't she marry him 10 spite of her
fathers objectiona" Stella sMercy7
isn't it a good deal easier to give him up
than to admit she is CT agca" Chicago
Inter Ocean.
al consider, . said the new man on the
staff, deeply hurt, ssthat have been
snubbed. I am chockful of unwritten
editorials and they've sent me out to
write up the home made pie industry
Chicago Tribune.
ssYer lock bad, Jim. Been campin'
out2H ssSorter. To-day's the fust time
I've been out er doors in three months |"
..Wnot was the matter with yerl"
s.Nothin' but the Judge wouldn't be.
lieve It Comic Cuts.
Mother Johnnie, why are you cry
ines I'm only gong g be away week
| and your papa will be home With you- :
johnnie No. he won't; he's going to
Rome. ssGoing to Romel Whf,
child, what do you nsan1'' IA hc1S1
him say thaf be would nnn1ns nelo
howl when You left. tsQk indeed
Well, WON'T leave yoa. 5eknnies Z:
Iexas Siftin2s.