Watertown republican. [volume] (Watertown, Wis.) 1860-1906, 1893-03-01
SprinkIes of Spice.

| lUS Hdndma. -MempnlS Appeal.
A Dogs bark does not always indi-
cate that he is upon the seize. -Bos-
ton Courier
THE couple who married for fun"
afforded large amount of it in the
divorce court. Puck.
| "POLITE LITERATURE" must consist
| Of that class of books which we never
meet without al introduction.
this is undoubtedly skin game,
said the man who had been cheated
in the purchase of furs. Washing
+, ton Star.
LAvINIA-Yes, James and l are
/ to become partners for life. Mabel
And you will be the senior partner
! How sweet!-Judy.
MRS. BILKINs-What a command
ing presence that lady has. Mr.. Bill
kins-Yes, [ guess she's married.
New York Weekly.
HOWEVER much we may revere the
wisdom Of the ancients, a 2O-year-old
encyclopedia is a great accumulation
| Of cobwebs. Puck.
"IN some respects the ancient Ro-
mans had the best of u.s." "Give me
an instance" "They hadn't got to
learn Latin. HALF Holiday.
PERHAPS the strongest advocate of
an extra session is the young man
whose best girls parents hold him
down to one call per week. Exchange
PHOTOGRAPHER madam, a
pleasant expression, please? Son-in-
law Gin the backgrOund)-Whew! I
must not miss that.-Fliegende Blaet-
ter.
LETS go back and break a bottle,
Cholly?" Impossible, my deah boy
rye quit breaking" why so?" "I'm
broke already. "A tlanta Constitu-
ton.
"THIs," said the youngster, as he
gazed at his effulgent metal-tipped
shoe, must be what they call the
light fantastic toe. Washington
Star.
JEss-To be safe, a young girl
should keep her heart under lock and
key. Jack-I fancied most of them
did keep it at the bottom of their
chests.-QuipS.
"MY son is smart boy at a bar
gain," said Hicks. Gle sold Il $40
gold piece his grandfather gave him
last Christmas 20 coin collector for
S15 yesterday. Puck.
Mrs. DOWNYCOUCH-Bu broke
into the church last night and took
everything. The Rev. Downycouch
Overwhelmingly Did they take a
collection?-TeXas Siftings.
"How DOES Editor Scrabbleton
manage to get such d reputation for
originality?" Gle waits till all the
other people have expressed their
views and then disagrees with them.
Washington Star.
GILeAL-" If you want anything
we'll done do it YOURSELF is a good
rule" Mullins-"l know a better
one. If you want anything we'll
done tell the waiter to bring it rare.
-Harper's Bazar.
TIMID CITIZEN (who has just
escaped from riot)-Who are you,
sir? Policeman am a member of
the police force There's my badge.
Timid Citizen (vociferously-Help
help!-Washington Star.
In BOSTON. -Tourist-I'd like a
conveyance this afternoon at 4
o'clock. Liveryman-Yes, sir. Do
you mean a vehicle or blank legal
form for the conveyance Of real
estate. ittsburg Dispatch.
A LONDON magazine has been sup
pressed for publishing one Of Queen
Victoria's poems. 1t seems to US
that the editor might have estab-
lished an alibi by showing that it was
not poetry.-Memphis Appeal.
CURTIS me a flyer, old
man" Burtis-" Certainly. How'll
a ten go?" Curtis-"Oh, come to
think, five wouldn't be enough; bet
ter make it ten" Burtis-"S Sorry,
old man; I've got only V."-Truth
NO." SAID good old Mrs. Jenkins;
81 haven't any faith in these new
tangled specifics. I've buried eight
children in my time, and the good
| old-fashiOned YARDS is plenty good
enough for me. "-SOmerville Journal.
HUSBAND "Mercy! what have you
got all the gas turned on full force
for?" Wife-"As a matter Of econ
omy, John. l want to consume
81 900 worth this year SOS to get the
discount of 10 cents thousand. -
Boston Transcript.
PERTERZE lRNCHZIZKOWSKELO
| is q San Francisco cabinet-maker, and
! Perterie ZmuchZiZkomskekO
| is Buffalo boiler maker. The con-
sequences Of a chance meeting Of
these two men in a narrow Boston
street would be too horrible to con-
template. -ROcheste Post Express.
| Jews Arc on Top Now.
Pharaoh. who drove the Jews out