The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-09-24

ncial rounds as postmau; a vicious and
ruminatlvc Grandfather Smallwced, ~
when officiating or numhliuC over his
oaken chest of records iu his tiny, tum-
hledown cottage beside the impetuous
Sark.
The old moss-grown Gretna kirk is still
standing, surrounded by crumbling head
stones Of Gretna Bishops" and other
worthless at the northern end Of the long,
dreary street The Kings Arms and the
Maxwell Arms midway 10 the Sarl<, are
ruinous and decayed, and remain but
filthy dens where drunken kinds and
brawllng tramps hold common orgy. The
struggling street is overgrown with rank
grass and weeds. 6Old women with blood
less faces and barbaric BARNS with dirty
faces leer and boot AT you as you pass.
Down at the edge of the brae forming tho
last vestige of Scottish land beside the
Sark, in the third cottage from the
stream live William Laing and his half
imbecile old wife; the latter now deaf for
more than forty years and with pinched
white face whittier than the trembling
white frills of her 'mucthn cap upon her
poor, palsied head
There is just one room in this stone cot
tage and that not IL feet square The
street door is at the side of the house
| front. Behind this is a recess and a bed.
A back door opens upon a little walled
kail-Yard. Opposite the bed is a wide
fireplace whore food is cooked upon and
against peat fire as in ancient times
Opening upon the street is one window,
wide and low. Underneath this stands a
deal table, and beneath the table is n
stout oaken, iron-bound chest. This con-
tains the records of nearly ten thousand
Gretna marriages. They are worth
more than their weight in gold The old
man hugs the delusion that he will some
time get their weight in gold. He never
permits man or woman TO set eyes upon
these records, save for gold, and then
only in fever of fright lest harm shall
come to these boarded silent witnesses,
or from suspicion that some plot against
him for their possession is in
progress. l accomplished my own
purpose of Inspections only after
many visits; after yielding to his many
direct demands for drink; and after
downright bribery. Then, by impugning
his high Office railing at his assumption
of semi priestly powers, and contemptu-
Ously denying that marriages were now
being performed by him, l so stung his
episcopal dignity that he produced the
registers of the nearly one thousand
couples he had himself married and also
excitedly proffered, if there was "siller
ahint it." to illustrate the ceremonial
then and there, with myself for the bride
groom and his lettering, tottering old
guidwife, Elizabeth Laing, as bride.
The old man, half wild with liquor and
indignation, slapped his horn-bowed spec
tacles upon his nose, grasped a sOiled
Bible with one hand from the table, and
with the other clutched his poor old
spouse from the chair and whirled her
upon her feet before him
Stan opp! Stan opp t'gither" he al
most shouted. CLAP hands t'gither;"
was his next command. We joined hands
and the little old ogre proceeded.
AR We a single monl Ye anser aye,
ye ken" l answered aye.
AR We single wumman2 'Spak Oop
nOO!" he yelled at the trembling yet
pitifuily smiling old guidwife beside me.
''Ye ans'er aye2'
She gurgled and cackled assent
Dye ken ony reason why we shudna
TAX this wumman THE yer Lawful weeded
wife2 Ye gle in 4 that We ken' he said
impatiently, and / answered, mo"
"D'ye KEN" this to his wife, tony
reason why We shudna TAX this mon
T. be yer Lawful weeded mOnl Spak
oop, moo, We aud boho Gle in T.
that!"
She gurgled and Cackled again.
Eye bath gle in T. a o. thatl"
We both assented.
"Then," said the old wretch savagely
and triumphantly, we've bund yersels
mon an wife afOre thae witnesses an :"
he added in an ugly ndertone, as he
seated himself from habit at the table to
fill out our certificate of marriage, 9Th
dell TAX bath o. YET"
This is what l got as evidence of the
grOtesque ceremony: