The record-union., 1893-11-03
GENERAL REICHARq'S MONKEY.
Lively Business Transacted in the
State Lard Office.
Graphic Account of the Proceedings,
as Reported by JudSon
Brusie.

Hon Jud. Brusie never misses any
thing pertaining to the humorous side
of life. Ii there is anything funny going
on he is sure TO be on hand. He was at
the Capitol yesterday morning and ran
upon good. lively item, which he sends
to the RECoRD-UNIoN ''iu words and
language as follows, to witt:
General Theodore Reichart has got a
monkey, or at least had one Tuesday. A
friend OF the Generals recently arrived
from South America and, as a token of
esteem, presented him with an ordinary
long tailed, ,ishaggy- haired Woodward's s.
Garden-loOking monkey. The General
employed a couple of hands from the city
dog pound to deliver the beast at his Of
flee at the State Capitol. The monkey
was made secure, and during the entire
afternoon yesterday furnished more fun
for the various Capitol employees than
would have been found in newly mar
ried couple from Colusa County on their
way to the dome.
Four O'Clock came, when various sug-
gestions were in order as to what would
be the best plan for keeping the playful
pet until morning. 1t cost too much to
have him moved by the pound men, The
suggestion OF Andy Branch to put him
in the vault was found impracticable
when they attempted TO put the
proposition IN operation, the roller
top desk OF the General was too
small, the elevator shaft was incom-
plete; so it was finally agreed that he
should spend the night ANONYMOUSLY
chained to the coal-scuttle. Alter filling
the scuttle with Jumps OF coal as large
and as heavy as a cannon ball they left
the monkey there alone.
A bull, ii is said. will create great havoc
in a china store. l have heard the story
OF tho devastation once committed by an
injudicious confinement of terrier pup
in the show window of a millinery estab-
lishment, and have witnessed the waste,
ruin and desolatiOn of a bird store after
six yellow cats had surreptitiously in
stalled themselves there for one night
The collapse of a J-street awning will
make noise, dog with can to his tail
VIII create commOtion, the crash of con-
flicting railroad trains is something aw-
full, but none of these will serve as an
illustration of the destruction, slaughter.
ravage, agitation, disorder and violence
committed by that monkey in the short
space OF twelve hours. He started in by
throwing the big Jumps Of coal through
the windows and with the empty scuttle
under his arm started on trip OF ex-
ploratiOn, the results of which must have
been extremely satisfactory to the South
American. He pulled out every drawer
in the office and turned on every incan-
descent light in the room; he filled his
coal scuttle with pens, pencils and ink
bottles, then dumped them all in tie
middle of the floor; he made more land
entries and changed more boundary
lines than forty surveyors could do in
month; he rang up "CentraP' 100 times
on the telephone and poured mucilage in
the seat of every chair in the room; he
found a white vest OF Bill Ennis and
,oH ho nj no q mi
papers that Mr.. Wiley had been looking
for for over a year, took the typewriter
(machiue) to pieces and threw the letter
press cut of the window.
Finally, viewing the wreck with sat-
isfaction that can be felt by nothing else
on this earth but monkey, he went TO
sleep in Anglers hat. In coming to Cali
fornia he took a very decided dislike to
the Captains son, who accentuated the
bitter feeling by repeated acts of provo
cation. Now General Reichart has boy,
about the same age, who cleans out the
Office This morning when the boy went
in the monkey thought he recognized his
former tormentor. | will draw the cur
tain on this poor boy for charity sake.
Sufficient is it to say that portions of his
clothing were found in every corner of
the room. One little narrow shirtband
is all he had on as he frantically rushed
down the stairway and met face to face
dozen female tourists who were visiting
the Capitol before their train pulled for
the south. Three of them tainted away,
and one sang out: Good Lord, we are
in an asylum" The General came at
last, but all was DER.
The monkey lay in slumber 'mOngst
the papers on the floor. Anyone passing
his Office to-day will see the following
notice on the door: For sale, l damn
monkey Cheap. Inquire within"