davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26

do not seem to be pleasantly impressed
with the customs Of the country.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26
Amply Supplfed.

II understand" said the man of general
Information, that the King of Siam has a
hundred wives"
Great Scott" exclaimed Mr. Meekins;
no wonder he isn't looking for war"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26

There is one good thing to be said in favor
of the icemen. They have as yet refrained
from selling the public glass limitations.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26
SHOOTING STARS.

There are conditions" said the man who
started the ventilating fan, under which
one u justified In putting on airs"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26
Ton Much for Him.

"And do you mean to say, exclaimed
Farmer Begosh, as he gazed at the trolley
wire that that thing is used for travelin'
purposes?"
Yes"
Human bein's go that wayTe
"Of course"
"Good-by."
where are you going?"
Back home. I'm gettin' used to the
steam cars. but I'm burned eff I'm ready to
be sent by telegraph
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26

will probably be transferred from comic
opera to history.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26
The Warm Asphalt.

He may not feel the yielding turf;
In town he has to stay;
But he can feel the yielding pave
Each sultry summer day.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26
That Old Unfeelin< Gibe.

The boy stood on the burning deck,
And the escaping crew
Who Stunned the flames. inquired. "Now Is
1t hot enough for your"
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26
Srock-TAk1xa REpucr1oss.

Srock-TAkrxa REDUCTIONS
SHOE DEPARTMENT.
broken line Of Ladies' Kid oxfords opera toes. pat
ent leather tips.
NOW 80. Co.,
Misses Tan Goat Oxfords.
WERE eL75. NOW 81 25-
Childrens Tan Goat Oxfords Sizes ~ to 10e<
WERE Sl35. NOW &l.O0-
Childrens Tan Goat Oxfords. Sizes to 8.
WERE 81 25. NOW 75c.-
Misses and Children's Dark Tan Goat oxfords.
WERE a. p and 81 so. NOW sl.O0-
Misses and Childrsn's Glazed Kid Oxforda patent
leather tips.
WERE 81. 25 and sl.50. NOW I'll
Children's Red Goat Oxfords. button and ties.
WERE 81. 81 25. 81. 35 and 81. 90 NOW 75c. -
Boys Brown Cost and Calf Oxford Ties.
WE'RE eL50. NOW 81 ID
Boys Best Quality Tennis Shoes.
WERE SOC. NOW 35c.-
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26
A Suggestion to the Germ.
From the Boston Herald.

Prom the BO5tOn
1t is profoundly to be hoped that the
cholera bacillus will see Naples and die.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26

SroOK-TAkrsa Rrpucrroxs.
UPHOLSTERY DEPARTMENT..
IRISH POINT LACE CURTAINs
WERE els So NOW % 30 PR
WERE sl2. So. NOW %. IS PR
WERE elL co. NOW $50 PR
WERE 1915. NOW e331h PR
SWISS TAMBoURED LACE CURTAINs
WERE eco. 90. NOW els 90 PR
WERE rs. NOW o. 80 PR
WERE 90 SO. NOW - 90 PR
WERE Ga s7S NOW IS 90 PR
CoLoRED MADRAS CURrAINs
WE'RE 81. 50. NOW 400 Pr
WERE % co. NOW a. 90 PR
LACE-EDGK MUSLIN CURTAINS.
WERE 90 90. NOW a. 90 PR
CHENILLE PoRTIRREs. FIGURED ALL OVER.
WERE clio NOW 81. 80 pair
31-INcH PRINTED CHINA SILK
WAS Soc and soc. NOW 37sc yard.-
CHENILLE TABLE COVERS. FRINGED ALL
+wERE ei NOW 80
@-wERE e. NOW el so
64-wERE e1 NOW 7sc
s4-wERE a. NOW e.
VELOUR TABLE COVERS
-64-wERE So NOW o.
FLY SCREENS.
WERE $50. NOW Co.,
WERE Soc NOW 4oc-
MANUFACTURERS SAMPLE LINE OF DOWN
CUSHIONS. covered with silk. satin and sstseu, q
less than the price of uncovered Cushions.
'a'n ct. blds)
HE MoouErrE Russ
Bought at suction. - previously advertised. are
Size 1896. I'll
Size 27x66, - So
Size 3or72. 81 To-
ORIENTAL RUGS.
WERE $40 NOW O. 50
WERE 90 NOW e1.5o
WERE els NOW olo
WERE $40 NOW az so
t4'n moor LIST annex
SrocK-TAKrxa RrDucrroxs.
JAPANESE DEPARTMENT.
1000 After-dinner Coffee Cups and ssucsrs. blue
WERE l5c. NOW Sc
500 Coffee Cups aud saucerx
WERE 35c NOW l2Lc-
800 Extra Thin Cups and saucers
WERE 40 and SOC. NOW 25c.-
1000 individual Buffers.
NOW loo. doom
Palm Leaf and Bamboo Fans.
NOW 1c
Straw stoop seats-
NOW Be-
Paper Para.ola
NOW Sc
Porch Curtains. size sKlo. complete. With cord and
pulley.
WERE ss,sa Nows2-
so Umbrella Jars two sizes.
WERE 81 SO and g. NOW 0sc.-
loo Folding Eans.
WERE &c. NOW lc-
100 Rose Jars
WERE SOC. NOW Co..
200 Baskets. all shapes and sizes.
WERE 10 and 15c. MOVES
100 Bronze Paper Knives. handsomely engraved
WERE el.50 NOW 40
100 Plattcrs. round and oval
WERE $l.0o and 81 so. NOW 75a-
so Flower Pots.
WERE 81. 90 and sl.50. NOW &C.
300 yards Crepe Cloth. blue yellow green and pink
grounds stamped in sold that will not tsrnish-
WAS 95c. NOW acc yard
Bamboo Portieres
WERE 81 So NOW 81 90 each
(Thtrd hoor.. LIST and % annexes)
Srock-TAkrsa REDUCTIONS.
INFANTS DEPARTMENT.
Lot Of Children's Bingham Dresses 0retchsn style
fancily trimmed In HAMBURG. high full sleeves.
NOW &C.
Lot Of Bingham Dresses rufies Of deep embroidery
over shoulders. some finished with zousve jscksts
NOW el22-
Lot Of Childrens sun Bonness. full crown. corded
<Second door. H. ounoins.'
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26
Srock-TAx1xa REnucr1oss.

woMEN's COTTON UNDERWEAR
Lot Of Muslin Gowns trimmed in nns tucks and
Hamburg edging; V-shaped neck.
NOW 81. 10
Lot Of Ladies' Fine Cambria Drawers. trimmed In
valencennes lace Of beading and fine tucks abovS
WERE o.. %. NOW 5Oc.-
Lot of Muslin and Cambria Drawers, elaborately
trimmed In vide embroidery. cluster Of hne tucks
above.
WERE e. so. NOW 15c.-
Lot Of Ladies' Muslin Walking Skirts. deep Hamburg
rufle on bottom. cluster Of tucks above.
WERE el.OO. NOW 75c.-
ca floor 10th Ut. building }
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26

81. 25 for 10 yards Of 25c Scotch ainghams.
Soc for 8 yards Of yard wide Percsles.
12'sc yard for 16c quality Dotted Swiss.
25c yard for Sc quality Dotted Batists.
Ice yard tor $50 quality Nainsook.
35c for SOC Paris Novelty Hose.
CSC for u. 4S Opera Length Isle Hose.
79c for Csc Lace Front Silk Vests.
CSC yard for Soc quality 4-inch Ribbons.
23c yard for 35c quality Millinery Ribbons.
loo for Pure Linen Initial Hsndkerchiefs.
800 for &c Eton Linen Collar and CUTS.
u. 81 for ~ Eton Fronts Of slkA
SOC for three 25c SILK windsors.
81 6S for u. 81 Colored SILK Sun Umbrellas.
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26

Srock-TAkrsa REDUCTIONS
COTTON DEPARTMENT.
It's seldom that such staples Cottons offered
ct reduced pricss We have several pieces in nearly
all widths. SHELF PIECEs-PIECEs THAT HAVE
THEIR EDGES AND FOLDS sOILED FROM THE
SHELVES.
-, 4o-inch@ 5-inch-54-i inch. 74-s-Ae4 and 104
sheetinss ALL REDUCED TO PRICES that will
cause their quick disposal
cd floor. 1t butldine)
Srocx-TAx1xa RrDucr1oxs.
BOYS DEPARTMENT.
About hundred suits-Galatea, sateen and Bed
ford cord-Kts and Panss-shss have been g. IS. "a.
- 70. e5 and %. so
NOW g. 70
Sizes to 10 in Pants.
Band In Kilts.
t3d noor st. building)
Srocx-TAK1xa REDucr1oxs.
CLOAK DEPARTMENT.
Bl.ci English cravenette earmsnss half dix lined
military cape Sizes 80 and AZ.
WERE SIS and $50. NOW el5.-
Light Gray Refer Jackets. lap seams. notched
collar. Size b
WERE e5 90. NOW - TO-
3Navy Blue Storm Serge Blazer Jackets, half xilk
lined. Size ~.
WERE o. and % 70. NOW g. 3d.
Elegant Black Satin Cape. silk lined.
WAS s45. NOW eos
4 W-an ffAf rat
yoke.
2Al-wool Light Cloth Travelling Garments. braided
yoke. Sizes 81 and "a.
WE'RE &16 So NOW e1o.-
2Light Tan Cloth Cspes. braid edge.
WERE $3.50. NOW e.. 60
Tan Walking Jacket full bertha Of velvet Size "a.
WAS ga. NOW SO
Light Tan Refer Jackets. double breasted.
finished seams. Sizes 10 and "a.
NOW e5.O0-
cd floor. 1lth st building
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26

TME capitol" SEWING MAGElNE AT $3.50
spared
in
WOODWARD LorHRor
1oTHu TH AND sTsN NV
Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-07-26

y Building Papers. Moth-proof Goods, Fire Brick.
Clay and Tile Asbestos. Flue Lining. Pulp Slate &c.
ap14
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
Tunnel Ventilation.

The tunnel beneath che Mersey at
Liverpool, is said to present strik-
ing achievement in the important
matter Of ventilation. 1t extends
deep below the bed OF the Mersey to
the solid red sandstone, and ap-
preached at either end by elevators
of seventy and ninety feet lift, it was
fOrescen that ventilation was Il neces-
sity OF the graveSt character. The
tunnel is large enough to avoid tho
piston action. its cross section being
several times that of the trains and
at and near the middle OF the tunnel
are openings to small side drift or
tunnel running alongside of the main
tunnel to the shore end, where is
fixed large fan, the result being
that air constantly enters at the sta
tions, which are thus swept clear OF
all vitiating air A train starting
in pure air at the station follows the
air travelling in the tunnel up to the
center, and any change OF air between
train or tunnel is thus less than il
would he il the air in the tunnel
were not moving. Past the tunnel
center the train begins to travel
against the moving air. by which
time the air in the train will be more
or less fouled by the passengers, and
the ventilation due to train motion
then begins to increase. The first
air entering from the tunnel to the
train IS perhaps as good at that time
as the air in the strain, and, as the
train proceeds, 1t meets purer air at
every foot forward, and when it
reaches the station is in air Of surface
quality again.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
WHERE THE LORDS MEET.


4 Splendid Chamber 100 Feet Long ans1
Richly Decorated and Furnished.
What specially strikes visitor on
entering the House OF Lords for the
first time is the rich splendor OF tho
chamber, says the New York Herald.
1t Is a noble apartment. 100 feet long
by As broad. and - high, splendidly
adorned and carved. lighted by
twelve richly decorated windows.
All round run galleries, protected by
handsome brass railingA The end
gallery is that set apart for the use
Of strangers. 1t has the press gallery
just in front. The galleries that run
along the sides are for the use of dis
tinguished persOnageS When the
Princess OF Wales aud other ladies OF
the royal family attend to hear tho
debates they invariably view the
scene from the alcOve OF the gallery
to the left of the throne. The throne
itself is a richly gilt chair, directly
facing the strangers gallery. 1t
stands on a slightly raised dais and Ia
divided on from the rest Of the house
by hdndrail From this part OF the
chamber privy councillors and tho
sons of peers who have the entree
~'u"a'J "OV~A OAO piOCCCuiuSS Guu
on the night OF any great debate
many members of the House of Com
mons also may be seen here
The seats in the House OF Lords
are arranged much as in the Lower
House, except that rows of cross
benches face the woolsack. 1t IL
there that the Prince of Wales and
the Dukes OF Edinburgh. C0nnaught,
and Cambridge ordinarily sit. this
part OF the house Indicating
independence of political allsxi-
ance to either of the great
parties Occasionally some noble
lord who may have broken with his
party finds a temporary seat here.
too. as Lord Derby did in the session
of 1879. The Lord Chancellor, who
acts as Speaker or Chairman OF tho
Upper House, sits in front of tho
throne on the sO-callcd wOolsack
This is really a sort Of ottoman, and
. seat compared with which an arm
chair such as the Speaker of the
House OF Commons Is allowed must
be luxurious ease. The peers OF the
ministerial party sit to the Lord
Chancellor's right; those in opposition
to the left. BY curious custom in
the procedure OF the House, when
ever the Lord Chancellor speaks in
debate, he has to step two PAGES to
the left of, and away from, the WOOL
sack-an odd idea. for 1t places him
"a member OF the party in power
and Cabinet Minister-0n the OpI
pOsite side Of the House.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
Natures MiniCry.

Curious resemblance in nature
start with the cocOanut. in many re-
spects like the human skull and al
most fac-simile of the monkeys.
The meat OF the English walnut is
almost copy of the human brain,
plums and black cherries like the
human eye, almonds like the human
nose, and an open oyster and shell a
perfect likeness OF the human ear.
The shape Of mans body may be
traced in the mammoth SQUASH the
open hand in growing crub-willows
and celery. the human heart in Ger
man turnips and eggplant, and
dozens Of the mechanical inventions
of the present day to patterns fur
nished by nature. Thus the hog sug-
gested the yellow, the butterfly tho
door-hinRe, the frog-stool the um-
brella, the duck the ship. and tho
fungus growth on trees the bracket
Petit Journal des Sciences
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
Mind Your Own Business.

An old custom once prevailed in q
remote place of giving a clock to any,
one who would truthfully swear that
he had minded his own business
alone for a year and a day, and had
not meddled with his neighbors.
Many came, but few, IL any, gained
the prize, which was more difficult to
win than the Dunmow fitch of bacon.
Though they swOre on the four gos-
pels, and held out their hand in GER
tain hope, some hitch was sure to be
found somewhere; and for all their
asseveratiOns the clock remained
stationary on its shelf, no one being
able to prove his absolute immunity
from uncalled for interference in
things not In any way concerning
himself. At last young man came
with a perfectly clean record, and the
clock seemed as ii it was at last about
to change owners. Then said the
custodian, ooh. a young man was
here yesterday, and made mighty
sure he was going to have the clock,
but he didn't" Said the young man
seeking the prize, "And why didn't
he get it?" whats that to you?s
snapped out the custodian. that's
not your business, and-you don't get
the clock. Home Journal.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
Dull NOvelA

''Why are to-day's novels so very
unin teresting?" asks writer in ono
OF the magazines His own idea Is
that the modern nOvelists are too
much Iaken up with realism aud tho
'scietific spirit" SO that they forget
the ''unlversality of the imaginative
appeal" Perhaps there issome truth
In this, reasons the editor Of tho
Providence Journal. but dullness In
not exactly q matter OF choice. You
can't get out OF anything more than
you put in it and a dull man is suro.
to write dull book. Another load
which afiiicts current fiction is tho
rage for ''problem-" It IL no longer,
the thing to write a novel in the old
artistic spirit. There must be wrost-
lings OF spirit over religion, divorce.
or socialism, or what not Il wasn'ol
In that way that Fielding and Thacls
cray wrought
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
of course not. .

-Of course not
You know, I suppose, that I am be-
trothed to Miss Stepp?'
-Certainly-that is. the matter was
90 understood, and hence we did not
wonder particularly nj the forged state
Ocean with her."
That letter was forged by Hank
Ripple, do not doubt" said Ralph.
speaking moro to himself than to his
companions. without troubling Won
with details, Mr.. Lane, 1 may say that
I am worried greatly about Miss Stepp,
am even worried about her indepen-
IDENTIFY of the ice and all those consider.
atiOns afraid, in short, that she Is be.
have been. I shall accordingly sail at
once in quest OF her or Of tidfngs Of her
fate"
Mr.. Lane could comprehend this pur.
pose without approving it, and he knew
Ralph too well to seek to combat it.
"Of course / shall be glad to help
you in every way possible" he said.
Then help me to find stanch little
craft and few good sailors for this
voyage" said Ralph, arising. -Tll
start in an hour, Il possible. All,
what's that noise? Are the Bullets
returning?"
Ere another word could be uttered.
Kulu came bounding into tho office, q
prey to the widest excitement.
'"The best of news!' he cried. '.The
Nor'w ester has just entered port safe
ly, with fifteen hundred barrels of oil,
and here come the Captain and mis-
daughter!"
With one bound Ralph was at the
door, and in another moment his be-
trOthed was sobbing for joy on his
breast, while Capt. Stepp inclosed him
in q vigorous embrace.
Back again, Ralph, as you see!"
cried cried the old old. navigator in voice
have we got Hank Ripple in irons ous o BUY
the Chief of Police has arrested the
three runaways who have SO nearly
killed you in our absence!"
"Hurrah! Glorious! Nothing could
be better!" cried Mr.. Lane, tossing his
cap into the air. "Three cheers and q
tiger for Captain Stepp and his fam
ily w. -, ooo.+,o, 800. ,,,,.. ,,
the large crowd, which had gathered
around the newcomers, and nothing
more was needed to tell Ralph and
Mazda Stepp that they had reached the
end Of their troubles and trials.
We need not pause upon the joyful
wedding that took place the following
evening at the American consulate. nor
upon the happiness which has from
that hour been the portion of the
worthy Captain and alt his family, in
Guiding Maida's aunt. It Is enough to
say that the return home was not
marred by the least drawback, and
that the young couple are now among
the most useful and honored residents
of Chicago. Capt. Stepp and his sister
make their home with them, and vie
with each other in the care given sew.
eral promising members of a new gen.
Grafton.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
Three Dangerous Women.

Beware of three women-the one
who does not love children, the one
who does not love flowers, and she
who openly declares she does not like
other women, says writer in an
English magazine.
There is something wanting in
such, and in all probability its place
is supplied by some unlovely trait.
AS Shakespeare says Of him who
has no soul for music, such a woman is
Mt for treason, stratagemS and spoils,
and woman intent on those is ten
thousand times worse than any man
could be, for, standing higher, she
can fall lower.
Men may smile and jest little
over the tenderness lavished on q
baby, but, after all, the prattle every
wOmanly woman involuntarily breaks
into at the sight of the tiny beings,
is very sweet to masculine ears.
1t was the first language they ever
knew, and in spite of the Jest or
smile, the sweetest on wife's or sweet
hearts lips
They may laugh too at the little
garden tools, which seem like play.
things to their strength; but in their
hearts they associate, and rightly,
purity Of character and life with the
pursuit of gardening.
And, as for the woman who does
not care for her own sex and boldly
avows it, she Is coquette pure and
simple. and one OF the worst and
lowest type, too, as a general thing.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
The Point of View.

New Yorker Ito Chicago native,
with an attempt at the cOntemptu-
ous)--Did it ever occur to YOU how
the great world regards Chicago?
Native (complacently>-Umph! Have
you any idea how Chicago regards
the great world?-Puck.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09

Parent--Now. what are you going
to charge me to cure this boy Of the
measles? Physician-Nothing at all,
my dear sir, as it is an original case;
and you get your 10 per cent com.
mission for every child that catches
them from him.-Puck.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09

"Who says two heads are better
than One?" exclaimed Jaggs, as he
woke up the next morning and took
q dose of br0m0. soda.-Philadelphia
Record. ~-e-'t =
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09

"Onc thing more" said Mrs. Nc
Bride to the applicant for a place,
after other details had been ar
ranged salts factOrily. "Why did
you leave your last placer" 1.-THE wo-
man OF the house wanted three even.
ings out week." was the satisfactO-
~ reply. Judge.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09

Bigsby Ito friend in art gallery
What the deuce is there about that
figure to attract your attention for so
long time? II. Dent Gazer-Noth-
iDg,-Truth.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
lnRDtratlOn Nocensarv.

"What perfectly lovely children's
stories you write, Mr.. Scrlbem! How
do you ever do it?" asked Miss
Guscher. ''By locking them out of
the room, Miss Guscher,' replied
Scrihem. land filling my ears with
cotton. "-Exchange.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
enough.

Teacher (sternly)-Willie Wafiies,
you were late this morning. Willie
Wafflcs (blushing)--Yes'm. l had to
get up in the night and 90 for the
doctor. Teacher Well, Willie, l
will excuse you this time, but hope
this will never happen again. Willie
That's what my father said. -
Truth.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09

Smythe--I dreamed that 1 was in
Heaven last night Mrs. Smythe-
was there, too? Mr.. sSmythe--My
dear, did not say that l dreamed I
was in Heaven. -Truth.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
A Washington Converse ton.

'Have you received any pie yet?"
said one Office-seeker O}(anOther.
mo, bat Pve received provisions of
another sort" "What sort?" Gold
shoulder. '-EXchange
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
just AS Well.

A lady iion-tamer, Young and fair.
berkOned to the lion and it. came and
took piece OF sugar out OF her
mouth. ''Why. l could do that
trick" exclaimed spectator
what! vou?" retorted the fair per-
former. 'Certainly-just as well
as the lion!"-Quips
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
JO*OS'
Weekly.

Mrs. Cumso--Don't you think one
OF these new double head-rests would
be d good present for dear mamma?
Cumso-Yes, indeed: especially if
double chin-rest goes with.-Judge.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
A Brazen Creature.

Clara-That Gussie Gush ought to
be ashamed of herself, the bold thing!
Cora-What did she do? Clara
She's accepted Jack Jewel and he
hadn't proposed to her but three
times. York Weekly.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
A Cripple.

Tramp-Id like ter do something
to pay fer all this. but I'm a cripple,
mum. Housekeeper-You don't look
it. What's the matter. Tramp
Writer'S cramp, mum. I've been
keepin' II list OF all tn people wot
offered me work. mum. New York
Weekly.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
The Next Rest Thing.

''Mamma. the little boy next door
has got on IA new suit. Can l have
one too?" mot now, Willie" Then
l guess I'll go out and lpick fight
with him. Life
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
Tho Worm Turns.

Publisher (testily)-I can't see any,
thing in that manuscript of yours.
Struggling Author (vindictively)-l
presume not; but you know some of
your readers my be quite intelligent.
New York Weekly.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
Cause of the Rise.

II thought you said there was no
tide in Lake Ontario" ''There
isn't" "Well, the water has risen
two feet in half an hour" "You for
get that the fat mems bathing-club
is holding Il picnic four miles down
the beach Judge.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09

Jinks-Grcat 'ad, that hen and
chickens in Enstein's display win
dow. Filkins-Yes: they attract at.
tention. .Iinkins-I should say they
did. And when they've got it they
keep screaming: Cheap cheap
cheap. Truth.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09

Coins Twenty-three Centuries Old.
Some Chinese coins are OF but one
twentieth of the value of an American
cent. The Celestial Kingdom has many
enthusiastic coin collectors. In ono
notable collection there are more than
150, 900 varieties Of cash, the oldest Of
which date back as far as 23OO B. c.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-11-09
How 1t Tasted.

''HOw does that taste. johnny"
asked the fond father, as he offered
his small boy sip Of yellow char
treuse. "First rate" replied Johnny,
smacking his lips. sit tastes just
like drug store smells PUCK.