Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1893-06-22

q III
apt to lose his self-control. -Phla
delphia Record.
IT was not her whistling tha,
stopped the cart was the face shs
made.-Indianapolis Journal.
| A Transfer often loses his bari
| board. So does a boarding -hous
| keeper. -Yonkers Statesman.
| JAesoN says the Prince of Vale,
may not be a good cook, but he is an
experienced waiter.-Elmira Gazette
IF person says he will not coun
tenance thing, perhaps he will NOT
face it either. Statesman
! WHEN a lover throws his sweet.
heart kiss he is generally in the last \
throes Of parting.-Rochester Demo
craft.
WHEN a person considers himself
as zone in 900" he naturally regards 4
the others as ciphers. Boston Tran.
script. I
IF Chicago doesn't toll the old ]
Liberty bell it will be about the only /
thing to escape.-Cleveland Plain,
Dealer.
The proposition of base ball peope
to enlarge the diamond will put tn
hotel clerk on his mettle. Washing
| ton Star.
The trapeze performers business is
precarious at best. He should always
have some good thing to fall back on
Troy Press.
WHILE great many things are en-.
tirely different from what they SEEM
as a rule the hen goes as she lays
Buffalo Courier.
The reason a person sees stars
| when he is struck in the head must
be because it makes him sore aloft.-
| Rochester Democrat.
A KANSAS man thinks he can de-
stroy cyclones by exploding them
airy it and be blowedw says the cy.
clone. News
THE hose-makers of Waltham have
struck. They probably knit their
brows before they went out and then
darned their employers.
A BALTIMORE paper says that the
soldiers at Fortress Monroe have three
pet billy-goats They are doubtless
kept on the ram parts. -Philadel phia
Record.
HICKs-Did you hear about Brash's
death? He died quite suddenly.
Wicks-It was like him. He always
was so impulsive, you know.-Boston
Transcript.
TEACHER-"Are there any classes
in republic like ours:" Boy-"Only
two" "Two?" "Y es'um; them wots
got or pull an them wot amt. p
Good News. s..
AUNT-"Well, Bobby, what do you
want to be when you grow up"
Bobby remembering private seance
in the woodshed)-"An orphan.
Texas Siftings.
| Mrs. SQUEEzEM-~I mean to have
spring lamb and green peas for din
| ner soon." Boarder-"1 move thai
your resolution be tabled at once. p
Boston Gazette.
| KNIBBs- nice Miss Plump
| leigh looks! She looks good enough
to eat. Gibbs-She is good enough
| in fact, she's eating most OF the
time.-Detroit Free Press.
JINKs-Don't you think that the
| intentions OF French duelists are
more honorable than is generally con-
coded? Filkins-Oh, yes; as rule
they aim high. Brooklyn Life.
PAPA" said Fred, @if you'h give
me dollar, I'll give. you present
well" lets hear what the present is
to be?" said his father. "A cent,
said Fred. -Harper's Young People
"AR You going to see the play to-
night" Il am going to the theater,
but whether I shall see the play o.
only an opportunity to study the
latest forms of millinery architecture
cannot tell. Exchange.
Mr.. LUsHFORTH-I believe I've gOt
em again Mrs Lushforth-I hope
you will have snakes or monkeys, Or
some sort of menagerie animals
Those mice you had the last time
made me 50 nervous that / could
hardly sleep indianapolis Journal.
! PERHAPS for concentrated inaccl
racy of statement nothing can sur
pass the following sentence, which
occurred in an account of a burglary
given in a newspaper: after a
fruitless search, all the money was
recovered except one pair Of boots. y
Tid-Bits
ENGLIsHMAN-Pardon me, sir, but
where do you come from? Paddy
From County Cork. Englishman~
Then that accounts for your brogue
Paddy-May [ ak where you come
from? Englishman (proudly)-FroDI
Worcester. Paddy-Then that acl
counts for your auce.-Tid-B Bits.
BUTLER-Theres a man below 3!