Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1893-08-24
Let US All Laugh.

Let US All Laugh.
THE girl baby is the first great
crisis of married life. Galveston,
| News.
WELL DoNE-The farmer who
falls in with bunco men. -Philadel-
phia Call.
THE girl who had a falling out with
her friend will not try the hammock
again. -Picayune.
A GREAT many people express opin-
ions that should be sent off by freight
Galveston News.
THE sad sea waves-The hotel
keeper saluting his parting guests
Union County Standard.
THERE are some men who have to
be knocked down first and argued
with afterwards. "A tchisOn Globe
THE summer girl is generally loaded
to kill and should be labeled, Charm
ing, but dangerous. steep Brook
| Bazaar.
WHEN parliamentary division
and nose are apt to have it.--Lowell
Courier.
THE man who "has the pull" at a
picnic is generally the thoughtful
chap who has brought a flask-Bos-
ton Bulletin.
THE reason that the geysers at the
National Park leap so high is because
they are composed of spring water. e.
Lowell Courier.
odd | tell you that story about
1882" mo, SIR" "Well, I'm afraid
I can't tell you. It's two gross
Philadelphia Record.
The man who gets up a rattle fig
ures on sure thing. At least he
seldom or never takes any chances
himself. -BufIalo Courier.
DURING the preserving season the
housewife realizes that one essential
Of the occupation is to preserve her
quanimity. Courier.
Il RECKON" said Farmer Bethune,
looking at the Dahomey amaZOns,
"them's the kind O. soljers at fight
under kver. "-Cleveland Plaindealer.
THERE are those who hesitate to
affirm that it represents real mu-
steal progress when a hand-organ is
pulled along the street. -Philadelphia
Times.
SHE-Will you see papa to-mor-
row? He-Y-yes, if you will give me
q letter of introduction. He never
knows me when he sees me.-Detroit
Free Press.
IT is very hard to explain the at
fractions of country life to city man
who has just investigated the voltage
Of a back-faced bumble- bee. Bali
more American.
IT is interesting to see how sorry
the man who went to the country for
vacation and the other man who
stayed at home are for each other.
Washington Star.
The owner Of a hobby carriage who
was upset the other day said that he
couldn't agree with the spectators
who complimented him on his hand
some turnout. Lowell Courier.
FoGG does not consider himself
absent minded. but he did catch him
self the other day before the mirror.
taking off his glasses to see how he
looked in them.-Boston Transcript
"IT must have been a love match,
for she knew he was poor" "No, he
told her he had only a remnant of
his fortune left, and she, of course,
thought she'd get bargain. Inter
Ocean.
WHAT are those tiny chunks Of
dough doing in that dish of straw
berries?" he inquired, suspiciously.
ooh. Henry" cried the young wife,
IL made them--they're short
cakes. Judge.
"The great trouble of the times"
said the telegraph editor when lot
of tissue-p paper copy blew off his
desk, "is that we are being over
whelmed with light literature. >
Washington Star.
SAID one shopper "Oh, l saw just
the loyeliest, sweetest, prettiest baby
per: what? Do you mean to tell me
that stupid nurse has dared to bring
|my little darling out such day as
thi ,?"-Rehoboth Herald.
| JIM SMITH has been trying to sell
his hog this week. He borrowed a
pair of curling-irons and curled the
hogs tail to give him thrifty APP
pearance, but he got the irons too
hot and singed the hair pretty badly,
which was dead give-away. Aha
meta Free Press.
AT one of the transporting thea
tiers, the other night, the stage man
ager made a remark which was al
most an epigram. One of the turns
was Kissed. The stage manager came
to the front with a .conciliatory
speech, ending by saying, "The man
who Kisses free show is a fool
Buffalo Express