Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1893-12-16
TACT IN GIVING.
True Kindness Oft Demands the Exer-
else of Judgment.


else of Judgment.
From Jenness Miller's Monthly.
Among the pleasures Of wealth l count
few others equal to that enjoy at the hoi-
iday season in bestowing simple gifts that
will give comfort to the worthy poor" said
charitable woman of lovely character a
few days since II feel that the fortunate
ly situated who miss the experience of per-
sonal visits to those in want and suffering
at this season miss what would make their
own lives richer and their hearts more gra-
cious and kindly for the rest OF the year"
was deeply interested and inquired into
this worthy womans idea of true charity
and asked the privilege Of accompanying
her upon her mission of mercy to homes Of
poverty. She acquiesced. and / was sur
prised when she told me that most Of her
work was accomplished six weeks in ad-
vance of Christmas day.
My idea of holiday help for the needy
Is to make the assistance bestowed as little
like charity as possible" she said "One
can make the recipients of gifts to be again
bestowed upon others SO much happier by
giving these things several weeks ahead l
have found that a hurried visit to a DESC
late home. with a few gifts. at the last mo-
ment does not begin to make the fathers
and mothers Of a little family as happy as
raw material given several weeks in ad-
vance, to be worked into individual gifts
for each child. 1t seems more as IL they
had rot been given by others, when the
mother can, with happy anticipation of the
little ones delight. prepare the gifts for the
Christmas stockings. The knowledge that
her own little ones are not to be left DESC
late amid the general rejoicing of the sea-
son Will fill humble but loving, mother S
heart with new joy and courage, in spite
OF adverse circumstances, for weeks before
Christmas.
Il am going to several homes today" she
continued, land you may accompany me
and judge the wisdom Of my methods of
gift-bestowing.
We started with her landau well filled
with useful articles and few weil-selected
toys for humber section of the city At
our rrst stopping place we found a mother
ana her four little ones. The father had
been Filled in an accident the year before
The poor woman was evidently in the first
stages OF consumption, although not herself
aware Of the fact There was sorrowful
paucity or necessary comforts about the
neat room that made one wonder what this
mild-mannered creature had done to de-
serve such poor fate.
Good day, Mary" said madam, cheer
fully. Il have brought you a few articles
to be made up for the children for Christ
mas, FOR knew that you would know just
how to do these things to please Them
luc SlilS DSSNOWSu were GOOD warm
stockings, full bolt of flannel for dresses,
some simple toys and an inexpensive doll
to be dressed for the baby.
The poor woman's eyes frightened as she
saw these things. then filled with tears.
You are very good" she said. THE
children sadly need dresses and stockings.
l must admit. These will last all winter -
She handled the scraps provided for the
dolls clothing almost lovingly. as she
thought of her youngest darling's delight
on Christmas morning, and one could see
that the idea of herself dressing the doll
was the purest of pleasure.
by the way, Mary. trust that you will
take this tonic regularly; it is something
that always take myself when a little run
down. Five dollars will buy the goodies nd
a few little trifes for the holiday dinners ~
she added, slipping that amount into the
poor womans hand. Il shall want to see
the children in their dresses; you can send
Ellen over with the baby after the New
Year to let me know how you are getting
on
When we left that home we left the
| mother with glad smile upon her face
,"She will have the extra work of making
| to do" said madam, but the happiness OF
doing the work herself will make her for
get the bitterness of the fact that the gifts
were those of charity"
One illustration will suffice We made
| several calls, differing one from the other
in the nature and circumstances of the re-
| cipients of madam's bounty only, for her
| invariable rule was, found to bestow her
| gifts with the well-studied and tactful in.
| tention to rob them of all sting and bitter
| ness, and especially to place the recipient Is
| Of these gifts in the most independent pos.
sible position for realizing happiness from
| them.
| l felt myself more en- rapport with true
charity than l had ever been before after
| that afternoons rich experience. l wish
| that this simple and altogether gracious
manner of gift giving could be adopted b,
! the many, FOR l am entirely satisfied thai
1t would help to do away with much of the
bitterness with which those of delicate feel
| ing accept charity when in extremity.
Few of us can understand all of the In
| tricate problems of political and socia
| economics, but most of us can grasp the
| human fact that those in comfort are un
| der certain obligations to those in want
| and not one of us but can feel the instinc
| tive graciousness and beauty of the nature
! that gives with the generous wish to softer
| the mental as well as the physical distress
| of poverty.