The Penn's Grove record., 1893-07-28
NJ

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Not 80 very long long ago the indie
! pendent woman used to be talked
| about" her independence attracted at
| teution, created alarm, stirred the So
ciety in which she moved to its depths.
She was independent sometimes at the
@ Of her character, and had
to endure the sneer of scandal,
the jeer OF injustice, the blight
ing iibe of venom, the sorrow-
| sometimes-of mistaken pi ty. She
had to assert, not merely to be, to bat
ter al the doors instead of quietly
opening them, to trample, when she
only desired to be allowed to tread. In
the old days-a dogs space of life al
most ago-to be Independent required
an immense amount of character, an
energy almost blatant, a strife not grhao-
| full or quite womanly, perhaps. a virility
! exhausting itself in violent and aggres.
siye action. The independent woman
had to be the pushing woman, the self
| assertive woman, the woman who cried
| herself lid and others down, like the
| man who beats the drum on the booth
! steps in the country fair, and after
| wards changes his clothes and becomes
| the paid-for show inside. The indie
| pendent woman OF old days was not
| always, or even generally, attractive.
She had an air of clutching, and to
| clutch even at ones rights is to appear
vulgar and to look dreadful and undig.
nIied. But the Independent woman
| of to-day Is often a very different be-
| ing. She has a peculiar, frank charm,
| a fresh healthiness, an honesty and a
| dignity that frequently surround her
with an atmosphere both refreshing
and invigorating. For she has won
her position fairly and fully. She Is
recognized instead of merely snubbed,
and so she feels at ease, and instead of
/ being blatant is often content to be
/ bright. 1t is a mistake, made too
| often, both by women and by men, to
fancy that independence and push are
one and the same thing. Independence
is the sensible following out of ones
own views; push is the vulgar endeavor
| to impress those views--and more es-
| pecially their holder-upon the unfor-
tunate people round. The pushing wo-
| men is quite one of the most odious
| features in modern life. The sensibly
| independent woman is n of the most
healthy and most pleasant. ,,Independ-
| ence does mot necessarily imply con-
| ceit, but push, at least, implies the as
\ sumption of it, and the pushing wo-
man is a sort of society town-crier, in
,, cessantly bawling her W merits. If
| she writes a story she goes about tell
ing her %distraught acquaintance how
much it cost her, how the burning of
| genius has d~evoured her vitality, how,
| ike Thackeray, she has had to labor,
and, like Charlotte Bronte. to endure.
| She mentions, in q loud voice sleep
less nights of travail, longs for rest
but is driven by her talents to exertlon,
| and explains only that death can soothe
the incessant bubbling of that mighty
cnnldron, her brain.
Tho pushing woman ought to spend
1t least one day IN the Palace of Truth.
! She would emergen no doubt in mysteries,
but she would emerge a decent mem
Der of society. But the independent
| woman who is not wildly proud of
i her independence, is often very refresh
Ting. Ii she Is unmarried she is
\ often o thorough bachelor. She is not
afraid to walk alone, nor need she be.
for she is thoroughly, and rightly,
capable of taking care of herself. She
thinks less of etiquette than of good
d.nse, and more OF morals than of man.
ner. She has certain work to do in the
world, and she means to do it as we'll
as or better than q a would do his
work. SIZE lets nothing stand in her
way, and if she is brought up short by
a ridiculous convention she does not
set it poisily at defiance, but merely
brushes it aside. "rhe proprieties'
do not concern or trouble her, but
propriety emphatically does. She
knows what is wrong and avoids IT.
She does not always care what IS
thought wrong and avoid that, for she
has a mind and she dares to use 1t. She
is hail-fellow-welt-met with men, and
il she is with them in her work and
they are polite and helpful to her she
is more prone to treat them as broth
ers than to think of them as lovers.
She is human, she is not silly, and men
quickly learn to respect and admire
her, She says what she means, but
she is not afflicted with a disease of
disgusting frankness, such as polsons
contentment and banishes confidence.
If she spoke OF q spade, she might call
il by its name, but the chances are
that she would not mention it at all;
that, above all, her r%eticences are ma
tural and not studied. Her silence is
the speeches. silence, not the silence
that shrieks aloud-"Heavens, behold
my modesty" She is independent OF
men, but she is always ready to accept
with dignity and gratitude the natural
assistance that she never demands.
Wherever she goes, she instantly
commands respect, and she is seldom,
if ever, placed in an awkward position.
She is too naturally dignified to know
what dignity means, and threads the
dangers of the world safely, guided by
the unfailing instincts of the sensible,
good woman. The pushing woman has
done her best to bring the rightly IN
dependent woman into contempt and
dislike, but only the very bkpd will
fail to discern the complete difference
there is between the two types, and to
avoid and contemn the n as much as
hey seek after and admire the other.
NJ IS Eleanor Munger, of New Ha-
ven, who has recently married Philip
p Wells. of Boston. wore at her mar