The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1893-09-07
MISCELLANEOUS.

We are naturally dlspleased with
an unknown critic, as the ladies are
with lampooner, because we are bit
ten in the dark.--Dryden.
what a superb face" said one
girl to another, as they stood before a
marble head of Minerva. Yes" said
the other what nose for specta-
cles!"-Harper' Bazaar.
Please give me nickel to buy
dinner with" said the tattered little
boy. lam so hungry" What canyon
get for five CENTS asked the old lady,
giving him the money. pie, ma am, )"
said he, with grateful smile.
The park policemen of San Fran
cisco use the lariat to stop runaway
horses, and all are experts with the
rope The captain Of the Golden Gate
Park squad says his men ''can stop
horse within distance of fifty yards,
without the slightest danger to our
selves" and he implies, though he
doesn't distinctly say SO. without dan
ger to the runaway or its rider.
On the Way to Santa Maria
Christopher Columbus-''Have you
written up the log book, Don Alonzo?"
Don Alonzo Penzon-"How in thunder
can l write up any log book in weather
like this? Here's the caravel been
standing on its hind legs since yester-
day morning. Bet you drinks. Christie
pher, you can't go down in the cabin
and stand any hard boiled egg on end
to-day. brooklyn Life.
AT the corner of Gates and Frank
lin avenues, Brooklyn, man is kept at
work oiling the street car rails. That
is because the neighbors complained OF
the creaking of the cars as they went
around the curve. The creaking re-
suits from placing the rails a fraction
of an inch too near together. Con-
slant wear of the wheels will widen
them SO that oiling will not be neces-
sary after time.
There is singular likeness be-
tween ferny places in the northern
woods and an average ''bit' in Florida
It is the palm that spreads and feath-
ers in the warm lands and the fern at
the north. The effect of the two is
quite similar from a little distance.
The fern not infrequently attains a
length of five feet in New England,
and in the northwest, where all vege-
tation is more rank, it grows larger
still.
THE other day." said New York
citizen, 81 saw a colored newsboy; he
jumped aboard street car quite in the
usual way. There may be other col
ored newsboys in town, but this was
the first one had seen. On the same
day l saw another newsboy who at
tracted my attentions white news
boy who wore spectacles. There may,
indeed, be other newsboys in New
York who wear spectacles, but have
never seen them"
Richmond, Va, contains among its
population IS George Washingtons, II
Andrew Jacksons, IA Thomas c'Stone-
walI') Jacksons, 4 Thomas Jeffersons,
Robert Lees, 6 John Randolphs, 1
Jefferson Davis, John Marshalls, 10
John Tylers 4 Henry Clays, Zachary
Taylor, Benjamin Harrisons, W, 81.
Harrisons, and l Daniel Webster. They
are all colored except John Marshalls,
/ Henry Clay, John Tylers, Benja-
min Harrisons, Zachary Taylor, Robert
Lee and jefferson Davis.
1t may not be known to many that
the points of the compass may be de-
termined with the aid Of an ordinary
watch. 1t is simply necessary to bring
the watch in such position that the
hour hand is directed toward the SUE.
The south then lies midway between
whatever hour it may happen to be and
the numeral XII. on the dial. Let us
suppose, for instance. that it is o clock,
and that the timepiece is held in the
position indicated. The direction of
the number II. will then be the exact
south. If it be o'clock the numeral
y. will indicate the exact southerly
point.
About the last thing done to silver
ware in the factories is to cleanse the
surface of all grease and other material
used in the polishing, process that
usually involves deal of hand labor.
A mechanic who had noted the expen-
sive character of this work invented a
bath in which the foreign substances
that cling to the surface of silverware
are easily and quickly removed From
this bath the silverware comes clean
and brilliant The employers of the
inventor have patented the process
with his consent, and the patent is re-
garded as valuable property.
Watch stopped, has ito" asked
one traveller of another. "Now, sup
pose you'll pay dollar to clean it.
But let me give you tip. Open both
OF the back cases so, hold it with open
side down and tap it with your finger
nail dozen times. Don't be afraid.
Snap it again. Now move the second
hand. Is it all right? thought so.
A drummer put me up to that trick.
Probab there were only few specks
of dust in the works and you've raped
them out. Very likely it will run now
for year and you've saved your dol
lar. If it doesn't run after the little
jar that you gave it then it is time to
take it to the jeweler."
1t is one of the anomalies of mod
ern hotel life that the more you pay
the less you expect in return. In the
huge caravansaries of the large Ameri-
can cities, where man pays seventy
five dollars week for room, without
board, he never thinks of asking any
service of the employees without paying
literally for it; he is charged for fire.
for light after midnight, for the use of
the telephone, for sending out mes
sage by an Office boy, for taking lunch
in his room, for corkage on his own
wines. and must tip the walters. In a
country hotel, where he pays Sc a week.
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