St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1893-07-05
The Very Amusing End Of
the Career of a Would !
Be Burglar.
Interesting Proceeding in
Which the Maraudep
Lost an Ear.
At Length He Despaired and
Asked the Police to
Arrest Him.


''If you like, I'll take you in hand and
teach you my profession, and in few
years perhaps l may take you into part
nership, but. to be candid with you,
| doubt whetherit is satisfactory calling
| for an athletic young fellow like YOU"
II don't seem to care about 1t particu-
larly," said L.
Forgery? The bar? Cornish wreck
ing?"
Father" said 1, 81 should like to be
a forger, but write such an Internal
| hand"
ga regular Eton hand" said he. "Not
plastic enough for forgery. but you
could have a writing master"
Il think l should like to be a bur
| glar."
Yes" said my father, considering
the subject. Yes, it's fine profession,
but it's dangerous, It's highly danger
ous.'
"Just dangerous enough to be excit-
ing, no more"
well" SAID my father, eff you've a
distinct taste for burglary I'll see what
can be DONE"
That evening he wrote to his old
| friend Ferdinand Stoneleigh, burglar
of the very highest professional stand
ing, and in week l was duly and for
mally articled to him, with view to
ultimate partnership.
l had to work hard under Mr.. Stone
leigh.
Burglary is jealous mistress" said
| he. "She will tolerate no rivals. She
exacts the undivided devotion of her
wOrShiperS."
And so found it. Every morning at
10 O'Clock | had to present myself at
| Stoneleigh's chambers IN New Square.
LiDcoln's Inn, and until IL | assisted
| his clerk with the correspondence. At
| II | had to go out prospecting with
St0neleigh, and from to 4 had tOde-
vote to finding out all particulars neces-
sary to a scientific burglary!in any given
house.
At first did this merely for practice,
and with no view TO an actual attempt.
He would tell me off to a house of which
he knew all the particulars, and order
| me to ascertain all about that house and
its inmates-their coming and going, the
number of their servants, whether any
of them were men, and, if so, whether
they slept in the basement or not, and
other details necessary to be known be-
fore a burglary could be safely at
tempted. Then he would compare my
information with his own facts, and
compliment and blame me, as l might
deserve.
He was a strict master, but always
kind. just and courteous. as became Il
highly polished gentlemen of the old
school. He was one of the last men who
habitually wore Hessians.
After a years probation l accompa-
MED him on several expeditions. and
had the happiness to believe that | was
of some little use to him. l shot him
eventually in the stomach, mistaking
him for the master of house into which
we we're breaking q had mislaid my
dark lantern), and he died on the grand
piano. His dying wish was that his
compliments might be conveyed to me.
l now set up OH my own account and
engaged his poor old clerk. who nearly
broke his heart at his late masters tu-
neral. Stoneleigh left no family. His
money-about e12. 000, invested for the
most part in American railways-he
! left to the Society for Providing More
Bishops, ana his legers, day books,
memorandums and papers generally he
DeQueathed to me.
AS the chambers required furnishing
| lost no time in commencing my pro-
fessional duties. | looked through his
upon, and found the following attractive
entry:
Tnurlow Square - 1902. House-Me-
dunn. Occupaut-.John Davis, bache-
lor. Occupation Designer of dados.
Age eighty-siX. Physical peculiar
itIes-Very feeble; eccentric; shores.
ServantS-Two housemaids, one cook.
Sex-AlI females.
Particulars of Servants-Pretty house
| maid called Rachel; Jewess. Open. to
attentions. Goes out for beer at p. IN.
TTplN loI!
Presbyterian. Open to attentions;
| SHORES. Elderly cook; primitive Meth
odSt. Open to attentions; shores.
FaSteningS- lock on street
| door, chain and bolts. Bars TO all base
| ment windows. Practicable approach
| from third room, ground floor. which is
| suffered and barred, but bar has no
catch and can be raised with table knife.
Valuable Contents of House-Pres-
entation plate from grateful aesthetics
Gold repeater. Mutready envelope.
Two diamond rings. Complete edition
| of "BradShaw'' from 1884 to present
time, 5SS volumes, bound limp calf.
GenerGl-Mr. Davis sleeps second
| floor front; servants on third floor.
| Davis goes to bed at 10. No one in
| basement. SwarmS with beetles; other
wise excellent house for purpose.
This seemed to me to be a capital
| house to try sIngle-handed. AT u
| O'Clock that very night | pocketed two
crowbars, bunch of skeleton keys, a
| centerbit. dark lantern, box of Silent
matches, some putty, a life preServer
and knife, and L set Off at once for
| Thurlow square. l remember that it
| showed heavily. There was at least
| foot of snow OH the ground, and there
was more to come. Poor StOneleigh's
| particulars were exact in every detail.
got into the third room on the
| ground floor without the least difficulty,
and made my way into the dining-room.
There was the presentation plate. sure
enough-about 500 ounces, as | reck-
oned. l collected this and tied it up so
that could carry it without attracting
attention.
Just as l finished l heard a slight
cough behind me. l turned and saw
dear, old silver-haired gentleman in a
dressinggown standing in the doorway.
The venerable gentleman covered me
with a revolver.
My first impulse was to rush at and
brain him with my lite-preserver.
Don't move," said he, ''or you're a
dead mani"
A rather silly remark to the effect
that if did move it would rather prove
that l was a live man occurred to me,
the business character of the interview.
You're burglar?"
81 have that honor" said 1, making
for my pistol pocket.
"Don't moye," said he. 81 have often
wished to have the pleasure of encounter
ing burglar in order to be able to test
favorite theory OF mine as to how per-
sons of that kind should be dealt with.
But you mustn't move"
replied that should be happy to as
sist him If could do SO consistently
with due regard to my own safety.
Promise me-" said /, ''that you will
allow me to leave the house unmoIested
when your experiment is at an end?'
"If you will obey me promptly you
shall be at perfect liberty to leave the
house,"
"You will neither give me int Gus