Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1893-06-10
PTTH AND POINT.


1t is the pitch of voice that leads us
to get stuck on it--Truth.
A "dear, sweet thing"-The Sugar
rust.-Philadelphia Record.
A political orator out West was re-
Gently alluded to asa harangue outang.
Puck.
In the bright lexicon of malaria,
the Peruvian bark is not as bad as its
bite. -Puck.
The tramp may suffer other hard
ships, but he never has to serve on
jury. Truth.
Profile photographs are admired by
those who are fond of side-shows.-
Boston Transcript.
A mosquito would make q good adj
vertiser, because it is not satisfied with
one insertion. Truth.
''You say in the meantime. To what
period do you refer?" ITO house
cleaning. Detroit Tribune.
The high water mark is not really
reached until the price of ice is deter
mined upon. Washington Star.
All the world loves a lover-yet it
laughs superciliously when your ardent
letters are read in court Puck.
1t is odd that some of the loudest
and most vulgar flannels are the most
shrinking. Philadelphia Record.
There is no doubt that the Chinaman
is greatly abused. Even his hair is
upbraided. cleveland Plain Dealer
1t is odd how railroad contractors
creditors feel safest when they know he
is making tracks Buffalo Courier.
Did the term "woolly West" origi
nate in the unpleasant fact that many
an investor has been feeced there?-
Lowell Courier.
The reason the piano is such a
sympathetic instrument is because it is
greatly touched every time it is played.
Rochester Democrat
There is nothing that so increases a
mans desire to work in the garden as
the discovery that his wife has mis-
placed the rake.-Atchison Globe.
IT'S the melancholy season
When doggie may be fond
At morning in the parlor
And at even in the pound.
Washington Star
fractions is awful tough" said
Tommy. '1'll be glad when I am
man like pa, and can forget all about
them like he has. indianapolis Jour
nal.
This is what l call pretty hard
lines, " unused the young man in jail,
looking deiectedly at the parallel iron
bars in his narrow cell window. Chi
cago Tribune.
Annabel-''What is love, aETway?"
Rosalie (who has had expe-ience)-
Love is the desire to keep some other
girl from having man you admire"
Chicago Record.
The best banquet that man ever sat
down to was never relished half SC
heartily as the core of his chum's apple
away back in primary school days
Boston Transcript.
''The air was rent, read Mr.. Jason.
81 have been lookin fer something of
the kind to happen. thought some
one would be renting the air yet, same
as the land. indianapolis journal.
We are informed by the Gardeners
Magazine that fish are Matched under
hens in China. We should think, if
only for the sake of consistency, that
ducks would be employed for this pur-
pose. Puck.
Schoolmistress Gust beginning nice
improving lesson upon minerals to the
juniors) -'Now, what are the principal
things we get out of the earth?' Youth
full Angler Jagged four, Confidently
worm. Tit Bits.
Servant to his master, very young
doctor, who is at bsnquet-"C Come
home quickly, sir. There's patient
waiting for you. (Aside) I've locked
the Office door on him so that he can't
escape. "-Fhegende Blaetter.
please, sir, it was 8 :20 when you
got here When we're late you always
keep us after school" said the smart
boy. very WELL" said the school.
master, you shall all stay and keep
me after school for one hour. Tit
Bits.
Mrs. Viewed (anxiously)-"well,
what do you think of my biscuits,
dear? Are they good?" Newed-
Good I'm sure if they were to be
weighed in the balance not one of them
would be found wanting. Buffalo
Courier.
Street Arab standing in front of
the booth of the Brabanconne giantess
at Vincennes)-"Wh do you charge
for seeing your show?" Twenty
confines, young man. See, here's
ten centimes; I'll only open one eye"
-Soleil du Dimanche.
Jeweler Ito grocery beg your
pardon, but didn't see you put Two
or three finger rings and scarf pin in
your pocket?" Grocer-"C Certainly.
When you come into my place aren't
you always picking up things and put
ting them in your mouth ?"-Boston
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