The record-union., 1893-05-20
BINKS COURTNHIP.
CHAPTER I,


Binks was 40.
At least he said he was, and as he had
always been 10 ever since 1 first had
the pleasure of making his acquaintance,
some ten years back, l had no reason to
disbelieVe his statement.
It was on Binks' birthday that he gave
me this piece of information for the tenth
time, and he gave it with sigh.
Joseph" he said, "who would think
that this is my fortieth birthday? Dear,
dear, how the years do fly"
1t was my own private opinion that
Binks had a knack of making them stand
still, but 1 held my tongue. 1 never irri-
tate man when l see that he is about to
confide in me, and something was evil
IDENTIFY weighing on Binks' mind.
He was smoking a pipe with de-
pressed air as we sat over the fire to-
gether, and l wondered if his cook had
given notice. Binks was particular over
his food.
Joseph" he continued, after pause,
when man has reached the age of 40,
1t begins to dawn upon him that he has
duties to do in this wOrld-duties, my
boy"
1t struck me that if a man did not re-
age mentioned by Binks, it was ex-
tremely probable that he would pass out
OF life without ever thinking of them
at all.
"For instance" went on Binks, fixing
his eyes upon me, there's marriage,
now. a man ought to marry, Joseph"
l was 30 myself-not by Bink's way of
calculating-and unmarried. l antici-
pated, therefore, lecture from Binks on
the subject.
My dear fellow" said, Pm too ugly.
Nobody would look at me-"
thought that my humble answer to
Binks was playful way of putting a
stop to conversation that might be dis
tasteful, and which was certain to bore
me. L was therefore surprised at the fe-
roc1ty of Binks' small eyes as he turned
them upon me.
"You?" he said, in slow and measured
tones of scorn. HYou are only a boy. I
was speaking of MYSELF
70 say that my eyes nearly fell out of
my head at this remark, would be poor
and feeble way Of expressing my aston
1shment. Ever since Binks' first fortieth
bIrthday-ten years ago-he had been
such confirmed bachelor and woman
hater, that the idea of matrimony had
never even entered into my head in con-
nection with him. He had lived in the
same solid, square, old-fashioned house.
partaken of the same solid, square, old
fashioned meals, and been served by the
same solid, square, ,old-tashioned servants,
as long as could remember. He liked
everything to be done by clockwork, and
had certain strange fixed whims and
ways of his own which a future
Mrs. Blnks would intallibly do her best
70 upset. En- person, too, Binks could
scarcely De called attractive. He pre-
sented the general appearance of an un-
nedged sparrow. He had beaky nose,
small, beady, black eyes, and a high, bald
head, with scanty fringe of suspicious
coiored hair all round it. When he got
excited III conversation and tapped his
arms about, the Resemblance became
positively startling, and it was all I could
do to prevent myself from admiring the
exact persontfcatiOn aloud sometimes.
On the present occasion, of which 1
duly recognized the Importance, l felt
that something was expected OF me. l
resolved to be diplomatic, however, as
Binks looked so much in earnest-he is a
bigger man than l am, and apt to hit out
when irritated--and 1 therefore repressed
those brilliant and pungent witticisms
WHICH were lowering at the end of my
tongue, and for the readiness and 8pu-
tude OF which I had achieved quite q rep
utation IN mild way, and merely said,
shaking my head little:
well, well,i Btnks, there is something
in what you say, but l am afraid it will
be great change for YOU"
That is what l am rather afraid of, too,
Joseph" responded Binks, a little un-
easily; "but L am q firm man, as you
know, and l should resist any innova-
tions of which [ disapproved."
l tancied that this ahte-nuptial resolu-
tion on Binks' part might be productive
of matrimonial squabbles in the future,
especially if the lady happened to be
high-spirited.
impaired these impressions to Binks
in Judicious1y yelled manner.
Mot at all, not at all, ;" he answered,
rising and walking about the room ex-
'cltedly. II have no fears on that score,
l shall be particularly careful in making
my choice to fix upon lady who is both
'amiable and pliable."
"rhey are rather difficult to meet
with" l replied, by way of damping his
sardor a little, ''or at least nature, in her
beautiful way Of balancing things, usu-
tally unites anffability with ugliness.
Witness myself"
mot at all, not at ALL" replied Binks
once more-this was a favorite expression
sof his. Il assure you that a beautiful
tsace is generally reflection of the beau
tiful soul within and vice versa"
do not think that Binks meant to be
personally insulting here, but he is not
always SO careful in the choice of expres-
sion as he should be. A coarser-minded
man than myself would have looked
upon the remark as direct affront.
my dear Binks," 1 said, IT can only
hope that you will find your paragon.
My own experience tells me that such a
woman does not exist
A slow, cunning smile crept over
Binks' face as l said this, and the express
sion made me so uneasy that exclaimed
hastily:
Good Heavens, Binks, is it possible
that you have already made your
choiceY
Binks tapped little nearer, and the
iatuouS smile spread over his features
What II have?" he SAID hoarsely.
made no reply, being for the moment
stunned, and also occupied in my own
mind in running over all Binks' femi-
nine acquaintances. failed to find one
whom l considered in any way suitable
In the meantime Bihks had tapped to
the glass, and was regarding himself in it
with an expression of innocent admira-
ton of his own charms which made me
long 10 fell him to the earth. How often
have l wished that heaven had not made
me two feet shorter than Binks!
You wouldn't call me a bad-lookinc
man, now, eh, Joseph?" he said, with a
Smirk, as he turned away.
Well, Binks, there's no accounting for
tastes, you know"
This answer, in some inexplicable
manner, seemed TO have q soothing effect
upon him.
"Quite right, Joseph, quite right; it is
as you say. l have hopes that nv adj
vances will be met favorably. 1 look
W