Walker Lake bulletin. (Hawthorne, Nev.) 1883-1926, 1893-01-11
WIT AND lIUM0R.

HlOIHlH5 sHdllO"' 49, DOStoH It"t"'f 'p''
Time heals all things; but it does
not heel a pair of boots. Orleans
Picayuae.
News costs; you can't even get re-
port from gun free of charge. -Et-
mira Gazette.
Woman Was made after man, but
man has been after woman ever since.
-leras Sytiags.
"He is an artist by profession" 81
know that; but what is he by occupa-
tion?"- Washington Star.
man who is in society and wants
to keep in must be continually going
out Yonkers Statesman.
you haven't the heart to refuse
him, Nell?" THAT is just the trouble.
Another man has that. Mems out
filter.
"What school of art does Daubster
follow? The realisticP" mo, indeed!
He's portrait painter" Indianapolis
Journal.
She-"Well, love is a lottery" He
a don't think So Would a fellow
with only s. have any chance at youP"
Life.
"Why was it that Jolliboy didn't run
we'll on his ticket?" The voters dis
covered that he was fast man. "-Neu
York Press.
allow perfectly Hamshak plays the
villain" said the star to the leading
lady. HE is one," replied she.-Detroa
Free Press.
Hairdresser-"W shade will mad
am have re hair dyed zis timer" Mrs.
Taddles lin whisper)-"Keep it
dark. - 7it-Bas
There are some men who can't take
home beefsteak without believing
they are taking their wives present.
-Atchtson Globe.
The sluggard is usually told to go to
his ant. but, with the perversity of hui
man nature, he usually goes to his un-
Gle. Boston Gazette.
Mrs. Bridie-"How much is your in
come, CharlieP" Mr.. Bridie-"You
ought to know; you spend it all, my
dear" Brooklyn Life.
$50 that is the family circle?" said
the unsophisticated theater-goer. 81
might have known it, there are SO few
men there!"-B0ston Transcript.
"She is very distant in her manner. !"
distant! Why, her disposition is so
freezing that she is constantly taking
cold from it, armouthpou Hem
Uncle Jerry Rusk is evidently an ad-
mirer of realism. He has placed real
snow at the disposal OF people who
were showed under.- Washington Star.
Adorer-"May be your pilot and
guide your bark through the stormy
sea of lifep" Fair Widow-"No, dear
but you may be second mate. Brook
Ign Life.
The old fool has this advantage over
the young fool: he will never be q
young fool, whereas the young fool
may some day be an old Boston
Transcript.
"Your cook seems to be in heaven
ly mood tonight" yes, | have just
told her that her angel cake was bet
ter than the confectioner's. "-Boston
Gazette.
Wife-"We v ere born on the same
day, John" Husband-"W cares
for thatp We were married on the
same day, too. That's what hurts me- ="
-Brookiyn LIFE.
Tostig-"The young have much to
be thankful for" Bertram-"Yes, and
chiefly because their parents think
there never were children like them
-New York. Herald.
William-"Father what becomes Of
the crows during the winter season."
Father-"l have been told they 90
South to look after the lost So
Rochester Democrat.
He (about To traveD-"Do YOU real
ly want me to come back soon?" She =
swell. perhaps YOU had better. You
see, have promised not to forget you. "
AIDE Fields Washington.
A magazine article calls attention to
the strong sense of propriety which
dogs possess. 1t doesn't mention it,
but every one Of them has his own
pants. - Philadelphia ledger.
you're the notwithstanding indi,
vidual ever saw" said Dick to the
seedy man on the corner. "Yes, even
my coat hasn't had nap in some
time quoth he.-BoSt0n Post.
at is remarkable fact" observes
the philosopher, that when a young
man and woman make bet of kisses
on the election the result is sure to be
close. Indianapolis journal.
We respectfully direct the attention
of our South American friends to the
smooth and business-lke manner in
which Uncle Sam conducts his political
revolutions Washington Post.
$50 you think Charley means &c
marry you?" I'm sure of it," did
he say SOP" "No, but he asked permits.
sion in future to give me only usefu
presents. y arper's Weekly.
Clerk-"You can call him up on tina
telephone, il you wish to talk to him.
Stranger-"How far is he from here?"
Clerk-"About ten miles" Stranger
well, I'd rather walk. '-Puck.
Mistress-"Do you cal. his sponge.
cake? Why, its AS hard "a can be-
New Cook-"Yes, mum; that's the way