The free press. (Poplarville, Miss.) 1890-19??, 1893-04-13
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

Fun.
Mistress of the situation-The servant
girl.-Life.
Consumed with curiosity -UnfamiliaR
viands. Truth
Gets down to work-The pillow.
maker.-Truth.
A man never finds how dull he ID tin
he tries to live by his wits. --Life.
Carver-sI'm but newer OF wood"
Marine Painter-"And but drawer
of water"
She-nAre these flowers all nature!'
He-"Yes, all except the price. ."-CLi.
cago Inter Ocean.
In fight between porcupine and
bull dog recently, the latter was severely
outpointed. d.-Puck.
She - Diamonds arc like women's
hearts-the richest jewels in creation"
He-"And the hardest. Fun.
Ethel-"How did George like your
swan's.down boa2' Maude-'He was
tickled with it."-Newport News.
One of the times when man begins
to cry and Sigh that all men are not hon.
est is when he gets the wrong hat
RAM Horn.
"Well, I've been making goose ct
myself," said the hen, when the eggs Oh
which she had been sitting hatched int
goslings. gs.--Truth.
"Did you ever go to Bins, the tailora'
"Yes. Got two suits from him. Ous
dress suit. One law suit. Very expen-
siye man ."-Waif.
"Why did your hired girl leave yo"a'
"She didn't like the extra work.
rWhat extra work did she have to dos'
s'Collecting her wages" - Harpers
Weekly.
Merchant-"Now here is piece OF
goods that speaks for itself. /" Unc's
Havseed-"Well, that wouldn't suil
Mandy. She likes to do her own talk.
Inter Ocean.
Father-"A hundred dollars for a
suit of clothesl 1 never paid that for
suit in my life." Son--''Well, you'll
have to begin now, father; here's the
bill. "-Brooklyn Life.
Mrs. Biugo-'sDear, after this you
must wear dress suit down to dinner
Bingo - "What for2" Mrs. BiDgo -
sour new girl has been used to it,
Clothier and Furnisher.
He-"Do you love me, darlinga' She
-"Sometimes 1 think do; and then
again when you have that hideous, baggy
new overcoat on, doubt the strength OF
my affection. ."-Tid-Bits
Trotter--sI hear that Grace Willough-
by is engaged to real live lord" Bar.
low---"Well, they claim he's alive, but
I've seen him several times and I'm
rather sceptical. ."-Vogue.
'tNow we can fix him in this way"
said the lawyer. "Oh, talk is cheap"
said the client. "Well, wait till you get
through with this and see whether talc
is cheap or not. New York Press.
"Don't you find him just as repre-
sentcd hima" Lady Indignantly -
mo, sir. You said he was bird dog.
and he hasn't sung note yet, and Pvo
had him two weeks. Chicago Inter-
Ocean.
At the Chemistry Exam: "Whlch 10
the best-known insulatori" The Candi-
date "a young student, pale and thin,
with bilious complexion and savage
look about himl-'Poverty, sir!"-Ls
Monde Illustro.
Mother Quitting the boy out of tho
pantry)-"How many more times will I
have to tell you to keep out of the pre-
serve jara" Small Boy (sobbing)-"No
more, mamma; they're all gone. DE.
troit Free Press.
Sport--"My watch loses something
every night aud seldom makes it up dur
ing the day. What ails it?" Jeweler
Observation-Disclosures it is trying to
conform to the habits of its owner. ~
jewelers. Weekly.
Prisoner = "Yes, your Worship, I
committed the theft with which l am
charged entirely through the instigation
of my medical adviser" Magistrate
"You mean to say that in carrying out
an experiment in hypnotism he sug-
gested the crime to youa' Prisoner-ssr
don't know about that; but one thing Il
certain, he told me to take something
before going to bed. ".-Agepds Prin.I
temps. @r--.--- 80 '4----->