The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1893-04-29

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Mrs. Macgregor hadn't worn the ed
gown, her red gown, that night. But
she did wear it. and of course the Turn
ers saw it-of course they saw it, for
that red gown was of all gowns the
gown to be seen if not heard. Oh, it
was terrible!
Tho Macgregors and the Thimbles
now found themselves harassed by
these several and distinct propositions:
l. Mr.. Macgregor was outraged lest
the Turner's should think that his wife
was wearing borrowed finery.
Macgregor is a proud and sensitive
man.
q Mrs. Thimblc was distressed lest
the Turner's should discover the impo-
sition she practiced upon them last
summer.
8. Mrs. Macgregor was fearful that
society would unjustly condemn her
husband for letting her borrow her Sis
ter's clothes.
L. was mortified lest my part in the
crime should be magnified unduly.
We had numerous councils of war. /
heartily wished that COMPOUNDED red
gown at the bottom of the sea, but it
was not mine, and could not do with
it as pleased. That COMPOUNDED red
gown had cost ''muckle," as Macgregor
said, and it had to be worn out If we
had bought it of the Macgregors the
trouble would not be remedied, for the
Turner's would still think queerly of
the Macgregors. No; the red gown had
come to stay. 1t doomed up like fort
ress in our pathway to happiness.
Meanwhile Satan chuckled in demoniac
glee. As for myself, have been. OH!
so very miserable. have never been
particularly proud man; neither my
nature nor my profession has served to
promote spirit of pride within me.
Yet here find myself neglecting the
volume On 'Insectivorous Articula-
tions," which ! have agreed to have
ready for the printer in March, and am
haunted by feelings of resentment day
and night, simply because l am unwill-
ing that folk should think me so brutal
husband as to compel Mrs. Thimble
to get her clothes from the neighbors.
Meanwhile the complication gets all
the more tangled up. The Macgregors
are being invited out great deal, and,
as luck insists upon having it, the
Turner's are everywhere, too-at par
ties, receptions, balls, dinners, thea
ters-yea, though Adelaide Lucy Mac
gregor were to take the wings of the
morning and fly to the uttermost parts
of the earth, 10! the Turner's would be
there, too, providing always Adelaide
Lucy Macgregor was wearing that
hateful, that ominous red gown.
On one occasion, Mrs. Turner. de-
ceived by that abominable gown. has
addressed Mrs. Macgregor as Mrs.
Thimble, only to be acquainted of her
mistake by n naughty answer and q
freezing, whitening glance
Macgregor. naturally proud and sem
sitive, has fallen into kind of mono.
mania that distresscs us all sorely. 1t
pie are pointing the finger of scorn at
him and are haunting him with the cry:
'"rhere goes the husband of the woman
| who wears her sisters red gownr'
Macgregor's magnificent Caledonian
physique is sure to break under this
strain; it is only question of time.
Mrs. Thimble has given up society
altogether; if you did not see her at the
bazaar last month. or at Swartout's
dinner last Thursday, or at the Wither-
spoons reception last Tuesday, it was
because remorse over that abomina bic
red gown has immured her a sorrowing
prisoner within the walls of our blighted
home.
As for myself, am, as have already
confessed. fast approaching the hope
less condition of total wreck. Only
an hour ago l made up my mind to
take q manly. heroic stand against Sa-
tan, who, I repeat, is at the bottom of all
this mischief. was seeking to follow
the intricacics and convolutions of
Pettit's logarithm 80, and was about to
prove the cube of the hypothenuse of
an isosceles triangle squared by the
parallax, when suddenly a realization
of my shames as an abettor of the fraud
attempted by that everlasting red gown
entered and filled my mind to the utter
exclusion of every pure and holy
thought Then, goaded by this hid
eous wrath, arose and cried aloud: II
win endure this no longer. Like Luther
of old, will hurl my inkstand at the
foul ficnd that has devised and wrought
all this wretchedness! / will make a
full and explicit confession of the
truth, and will send it to the Turner's
| in order that they, and if needs be all
the world, shall know how penitent !
am"
When the Macgregors come over to
night shall read them what l have
written. Then, if Mrs. Thimble and
they approve what / have said, this
confession shall be signed in the man.
ner of a round-robin, for truly we have
all sinned alike and our penitence
should be expressed in common utter
ance. fear that, at the last moment,
Mrs. Thimble, who is as proud as she
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