The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1893-10-25
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

A good all-around man-Ihe man
in the moon.
Penury Is very often the unexpected
wages of the pen. Puck.
Prosperous BARRIERS are even shaving
checks now.-Pittsburg Dispatch.
For spin on the road the proper
thing, of course, is top" buggy
Boston Courier.
A man who is in society and wants
to keep in must be continually going
out. Statesman.
Money may be tight, but there's no
reason for its getting paralyzed.-
Philadelphia Times.
All men are born equal-but some
are born more equal to the emergency.
Worlds Fair Puck.
The fellow who doesn't think at all
usually sets mp for free thinker. 49,
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Silence is golden, but you have never
realized how golden until you have to
buy it.-Atchison Globe.
While vacation always begins with
a V it always ends with n scarcity of
them. m.-Baltimor American.
Some of these banks are carrying
the early closing movement altogether
too far.-Baltimore American.
This is the season of the year in
which you can get what you do not
want real cheap. Texas Siftings.
When a parliamentary division ends
in free fight both the eyes and nose
are apt to have it.-Lowell Courier.
If you want to make sure your ad-
vice will be taken have it engraved on
your umbrella handle.-Troy Press.
If it could only be put up in bottles
general humidity" would make fair
brand of glue. Philadelphia Record.
Experience is teacher rare
And one whom none may snub;
Sometimes she works with manners fair,
But mostly takes club.
Detroit Free Press,
The alligator grows as long as he
lives. And he sometimes lives us long
as ten or twelve feet. Chicago Dis
patch.
ga well-earned rest" said Fogg
when he was given the particulars of
Stixby's cremation. Boston Tran
script.
Johnnie---'Papa, are despots hap
py?" Pappa---'I don't know. Ask
the hired girl. Kate Fields Wash
ington.
OF course the report of the serious
illness of Queen Victoria is not true.
Her health Is pledged too frequently.
Boston Herald.
Proctor---"Well. it's only a step
from the sublime to the ridiculous"
Lenox---"Ah, if it were only step
back again. "---Vogue.
The Eton jacket is ono of the most
absurd-looking things in the world
before pretty girl puts it on.-Shoe
and Leather Reporter.
The Baltimore police were paid in
silver dollars last week. And yet silver
dollars for coppers is not II good ex-
change. Boston Globe.
Landlady-"Let me help you to the
Saratoga chips" Mrs. Newboarder-
"No; I'll try the toothpicks. They
seem to be of softer wood, l think. "
The Elizabethan ruff will be in vogue
in the fall and the fellow who attempts
10 kiss fashionable girl will 'get it
in the neck Philadelphia Record.
Ada-"Why does Clara speak of
George as her intended? Are they
engaged?" Alice-''No; but she in
tends they shall be. Brooklyn Life.
dreamt Idwelt in marble halls,
| felt at ease, with life content,
Till fancy brought the landlords calls,
He came, alas, TO get the rent.
Buffalo Courier.
Bridget" There's man at the gate
with pigs feet, num-" Mistress
Gracious, Bridget, send him around
to the dime museum. New York
Recorder.
Beloved Papa says he sees no
reason why We shouldn't be married.
Lover lecstatically) &c Then hc wasn't
piuched in that last deal after all. -
Detroit Tribune,
"lf there is any more of this oscu-
latory conyiyiality, said the little
Boston girl at tho childreua party,
much shocked, "l shall withdraw. b"
Chicago Tribune.
A lady reader wants to know ii we
believe in cures by 'laymg ON hands.
We do, madame, We do mos5 fer
yently. But IL slipper or pine shingle
is better Galveston News.
Policeman to huud-orguu mani
"Huye you a license to play? Ii not,
You must accompany me. Siguor
Muukauin "Witha pleasure; what
will YOU sing:' New York News.
We go to slo,p these ulca- Iut ujgats
flannel by the cooling uru'le
Alou toward mpruIu wh vase up
An sn-ez', AN s1aHzs, aui snecln.
Kansas City journal
Mae-"rhat Miss Jumper Is dread
fully masculine in her ways, "What
does she do?' Mae-"Oh, I've seen
her get oil the car before 1t stopped,
without falling. Chicago lntlr-