The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1893-03-24
A LIVELY WEDDING.
THE CEREMONY ADMiNlST ON
THE INSTAlMENT PLAN.

A Chapter of Accidents at An Inopportuno
Time Causes an Important Eteut to Iie
Seriously lnterfered With--Patiencc and
Perseverance Finally Rewarded.
On Virginia roads in winter q man
will sometimes get turnover" on
horseback so, writes correspondent,
no wonder parson and 1, in buggy,
on our way to my own wedding, had q
complete smash-up, as had the ''won-
derful one.horse shay"
AS patching up smash-up requires
time, and no little ingenuity, we found
on arrival that the wedding guests and
Annie, in her bridal array, had been
awaiting me-the missing link-for
some hours.
Psrson was heavy built man, and
clumsy, and rs 1 hurried him up the
little porch steps the vine-clad structure
trembled. He awkwardly stumbled,
and without word Of warning the roof
trellises and all collapsed, caving in and
covering us with tangled honeysuckles
and Madeira vines and lathing old
enough to have had better manners.
As Annie and the bridesmaids knew
it was bad luck to put off wedding, in
spite OF bloody noses and bruised shins
we wero fished out OF the debris and
stood up in position for the cere.
mony.
/ can't understand why that old
porch, which had never fallen down
before, should have picked "sich like
time" and made such laughing stock
OF us that there wasn't straight face
among tho audience.
As we stood, all washed and court
plastered. for the ceremony, in dashed
Malindy, the cook, screaming that "her
baby child was in do we'll"
We drew the fat little pickaninny
out, half dead with terror, and then
drew water to dash on the cook, who was
having spasms.
Again in line, Annie was just about
to promise to 'honor and obey" me,
when Billyboy, swelled twice his usual
black size with the importance of the
announcement, put in woolly head at
the door and shouted tho momentous
words, "Pig's out |"
Every country boy knows what that
means, but l will explain that the roast
pig at that moment crowning tho wed.
ding feast, with lemon in his mouth,
had living comrads of most valuable
and rare breed, purchased from dis
tance. And "Pig's out p meant Ger.
tain loss Of that valuable "little horg"
unless Immediately raced, chased, run
down and recaptured.
1t took two mortal hours, and when
/ again stood by Annie's side, had to
mop my face, painting from the home
run.
During the progress of the wedding
feast temporary table, formed, l be.
heve, of a door ingeniously covered
with cloth, laid across backs of chairs,
gave way under bushel of cups and
saucers, but we had become hardened,
and did not regard that accident in the
least.
Annie and l started for our home un-
der the regulation shower of rice aud
old slippers, thinking our troubles
ended.
AT the first gate, without any rhyme
or reason, front wheel caved in, and
| went back and borrowed father.in-
laws jumper. Before we We're out of
hearing there arose the dreadful CRY of
Fire" and L left Annie holding the
reins, and ran leapiny back to help put
it out. Itproved to be an old outhouse
used on this occasion to roast the pig
in, and we soon "downed" it,
hastened back to find Annie and
the horse had both taken fright, and
the horse was running away with her.
That surely seems enough for any
"happy pair" but we were destined to
have another mischance, which proved
u severe test of amiability.
In tho cleaning there was a stream
to be crossed about q mile from our
new home. While lowering the reins
for the mare to drink l awkwardly
dropped my new whip, loaded in the
handle with lead. 1t went under like
bullet, and the mare seemed to COM
prehend this, and played upon US
very "horsey" practical joke.
After swilling water until I feared
she would burst, she deliberately took
hor stand in the deepest place and re-
fused to bulge one inch. Night was
upon US, stars were beginning to peep,
and ~ words proved Of no avail, l had
to get out and lead that mare ashore.
I had, however, this one great consola-
tion through all our tribulations An
ME showed such sweetness of temper,
that understood from the very begin
ming what sunshiny little woman I
had won for lifes partner