The Newtown bee., 1893-08-11
DID YOU EVER

know such a commotion among the banks? Banks private, corporate and national all seem to be in trouble and failure after failure follow each other in rapid succession. Some banks however, are as solid as the everlasting foresight that they pass through financial troubles as smoothly as a ship rides an oiled sea, or the hired girl banana peel down the cellar stairs. Naught short of an earthquake can shake them. HawleYville is small burgh and we have but one bank, but it is just this kind of @ bank. It is known in business circles as the First SAND Bank of Hawley- vile. This bank is one of the oldest institu- tions in the land. When Columbus landed she was, and when Barkhamsted was settle d she was all the more. The abOrigine child ren of Columbus time played humble -te- peg active business until the building Of the New England railroad. The credit of this railroad was then A. l, and the builders made tremen- dous drafts upon this bank and they were hon. ored for a long time without 0 single deposit being made. Queer but true. This was not good business policy for the bank and it low cred her standing in the eyes of the general public, (some 12 feet-) During these depres- sing times some of her most valuable front age was allowed to pass into other hands and Bakers large furniture warerooms now cast black shadow across portion Of her front, gelical Faith Cure," Fourtold Gospel Christ ian Alliance has been pitched right in front of her frontest front and the most astounding length of her terraced foundations. New Englands drafts, as said before, were heavy, but the biggest draft, for a small one, ever made on her, and one that came near burst ing the bank, was made when the walls ot was contract work and there was a sub con- tractor and there were many workmen and arsans to share ths the time and he could not look after the de- tails. Making bricks without straw was tar without lime or cement, but it has been proved to the world that the latter can be done Eop on How the finished the job and escaped injury from fall ing ceilings IS what no fellow can tell. We are desirous ot letting the public know who the man is who can make bricks without straw" and should have done it in the courts long ago but unfortunately property titles son of disaster. When we see a patch of plas- tering fall on fine piece of furniture we feel for him; he ought to be kicked to death by 8 iackass and I'd like to do it." Ii we can find ton of our walls (and we think we cam and if we ever catch that man, and if we can identi- fly him, and ii he undertakes to crawl through a knot hole, and if he gets stuck when about half way through, and ii we have our slippers on, and if the minister is not looking, we'll two moons, without making his feet sore. Have you ever had patches of clustering fall all over your house and keep doing it? No! | titude has never been fully tested. You are not ripe for the kingdom yet. We sometimes speak in jest, but never on this subject of poor walls. We often get real angry and abuse our best friends when we think of 1t. Why only | the other day poor widow woman with a blind COW with large family and one horn broken of, looked at a pile of clustering on the floor and then at the ceiling, and ventured i to inquire sympathetically if lightning had struck our building. Well now you don't | know how near we came to knocking that poor woman down the cellar stairs and telling | her to mind her own business; but then we | are ripening fast and we grow mild every \ day. We can even now wish this man g | long lite and 8 carbuncle every year, and if he | should happen to ripen and be plucked first | you may see us making an annual pilgrimage every Thanksgiving morning, to place forget me-nots and fresh mortar on his grave.
 In our sane moments we feel deeply grate ful to generous public for their sympathy and patronage. They come long distances and from all directions to buy furniture of us lThey know that we are located away out hers in a bowling wilderness, with tall grass all around us and an immense stock Of turniturs on our hands, and they know we have beer unfortunate with our ceilings and they fee
 sorry for us and they put their hands ava. down deep in their pockets and they buy lib
 so many, however, as when they buy Il
 some other place.
 The preacher tells us we are all poor sin liners and that this is wicked, wicked world but we begin to think there must be whoI lot of good in ii, after all. Come and see us | Don't look up nor say anything about ou
 ceilings and we will try and use you well an
 ing tor trains
 A. c. BAKER,
 New Furniture warerooms, Opposite Unio
 Depot, Hawlevvills. Conn.