The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1893-03-26
ksnrne ar the Humorous Aspects of Travol
Grim, Quaint and unconscious
Scottish Humor.

noe From MANY visits to the beautiful
island | can recall no more than three STU
ations where the foreign spectator mlgnsDe
bepniled into mirthful emotions; and these
rossested the quality or righteousness
rather than humor.
One of these l witnessed repeatedly late
Ia night. It is the outgrowth OF survell-
lance of parents over daughters. 1t is the
~solitary midnight serenade. Time after
tjme. on returning to my hotel from divers
vanderinps in the Cuban capital. have l
passed these love. stricken youths. stationed
opposite the houses OF thelr inamoratas IN
nil manner of acohized attitudes. strum-
ming dew-mufled notes upon ancient
guitars, and lifting their voices IN passion
ate though doleful petitions to the night
the moon. the stars and all the SAINTS. TO
aid them in reaching the ears and hearts OF
their adoradas. The f~avorite. indeed al.
most the universal. ballad sung by these
loye-lorn Cuban youths is, LA Luna" OF
which l recall one stanza:
NV sorrows and languors,
Unreasonable portion,
They follow each other
AS waves of the ocean,
Sweet Luna. protectress.
Deny not etfulgence;
For n treasure Pm searching
MY dear loves in~duigence!
Nobody pays any attention to those who
Tins pour out their souls upon the night.
The parents who are used to 1t simply turn
in their beds with thanks to the saints
that their doors are massive ana the WIN
dows are Of iron bars. Belated male pass
ers cast sympathetic glances at the lone
troubadours, remembering their " dis
NAL efforts in the past. Even the neigh
bors keep ~siience; and not a rock or handy
household implement is shot, as from some
shadowy catapult. on mission through tne
bosky midnight air. For hours OF this sort
of %luCubrious vigil no reward Is sought OF.
expected. But if the fiutter of q dainty
hand or the simmer of delicate laces is for
an instant caught at the balcony of the fair
ones alcoba. then 10 the minstrel lover IN
an ecstacy of delight.
AT one time myself and friend were trav-
cling on horseback the almost impossible
country roads of the southern coast In the
vicinity of Trinidad. Along in the after
noon we suddenly heard a great rustling,
callop'ng and hallooing some distance in
advance. Our wise ponies instantly grew
FESTIVE and showed alarm. We halted for
a moment; the yeoman listened, and di-
Yectly cried out excitedly:
"Ah, biene un toro bravo" ("Here comes
q wild bull!') The words were not out of
his mouth before his feet struck the ground.
Whipping out his machete he cut with In
credible speed a way through the hedge. 1t
was not q moment too soon. laundering
around q sharp corner in the road came a
wild bull. his pursuing rider Yelling. Ten
the bull!'') The brute catching sight
of our group charged madly upon
us, and it would have surprised
your anise-seed fox hunters to have
seen the vaulting through and over that
hedge as the cleaning horns whisked by
our ponies twinkling heels; while, true
under all circumstances to the universal
principle of Cuban po!iteness, the vanish
ing vanquero turned in his saddle. removed
his hat, and with the bow of a court1er sans
out after our flying squad:
"Perdoneinen, amigos; pero he tenido g
diablo con este toro!" t"Your rardon. my
friends; but ] am having a devil of a time
with this bull Ply
The going to inc coming from EUROPE
on the great ocean liners provide an end
less variety OF ludic1ous incidents; because
on every steamer passengers to a large pro
portion are new to Che peculiar and ire
yocable situations; formality can by nc
means be uninterruptedly sustained; midi
yiduals, character and station ate brough
into close. sharp and most striking con-
trasts; and all social distinctions are liable
at any moment to total ob!iteration in thu
common and often groteEque misery of sea
sickness.
banquet airs from the cabin tables. Tn,
ship's commander, bland as a bartender ii
port, has hide himself from view. Tn
purser's window is shut as If hcrmeticall'
sealed. The ships doctor has retired be
hind the strictest Interpretation OF hour
and rulos. The chief and assistant stewards
to whom your great fee has already gone fo
a choice seat at the table, refuse to recog
nize you. Your room-steward eyes yo'
with a look of sharp suspicion and clos
analysis. Will you give him much trouble
- an 100 f~o ~ornrnnglug NV prjua n,
utmost interest. But he vii! permit IL
early familiarity. The stewardoss fiaun;
her white-cappea head, plainly sayin.
'There are characters hon this 'ere vess'
aside NV h'own to sustain, slt!' The boa
swans. whose f~rizzled, fatherly faces @
the first day gave promise of sea-yarns an
ocean-lote revelations, are as stolld Z
bronzes or brass.
The sergeants. at-arms and deck stew
ards walk around you, lock you up an
down. ovsr and around, fore and aft, sta
board and port. ag II to remind Won TIT
deck rules are deck law, sir. The be
bows, those little dried up old commodor'
of the passages, library and iavatories, n
gard you from beneath bcetling bFows
with savage advance protests against ioss
bic REQUESTS for fRyorg. wander where YC
may on your steamers decks or within ht
splendid cabins. you find but sayager
selfish p~reoccupation and despair.
And how it levels the proud and grea
Look at them SPRAYING IN thor chaiI
hundreds of them, under the lee-Rwnine
hope, pride, scorn. hauteur, all. flown lii
the finish of tho shrivsled flowers belo
That pompous old fellow who can draw b
F., check for Il cool million. and who, on shol
reckous himself "A boy of forty. you kno
is stretched there like a d~runkerd, ho!dil
his two sets of false teeth in his neryels
nan with the most familiar abandon. ]
recks not those who see; he secs not tho
who reck. Here is n grand dame. as easy
subject of study. Her wig is displace
the powder and color have been sponR
from one side of her face by some attic
tive stewardess; her laces, hounces n
silks are disheveled; she is snoring, dive
siied by snorts and p~alatenl staccatos.
Sec this erst peerless New York bel
Paint. powder and bilgewater axe blend
in u dirty French gray upon Ler leathe
countenance. The fog has deposited
clRmmy rime upon this. Strands of |
now wayeless hair are fluttering stick
within her ogen mouth. Her eyes seem
have gone back into her head an inch a
are closed beneath dirty yellow lids. An
this wreck of beauty there is one bit
color. 1t ia in her pinky. pointed nose.
would have paralyzed her to have worn
2b.cent bathing hat at sea. So from unt
she edge Of her $25 hat her sea blister