Weekly expositor. (Brockway Centre, Mich.) 1882-1894, 1893-07-07

ropes before being set adrift
"Hum," said the doctor with a
curious sound of ingurgitation. Then,
peering at her through his half
closed eyes with critical computation:
about five foot four, / should say,
Mrs. Babbs."
"Ef you mean my height, thet's
jest it," replied Mrs. Babbs, growing
red again and gazing with dispute
tude at the memorandum book, in
which the doctor was making an
other entry.
"Weightp" inquired the doctor,
holding his book in readiness for
still another entry.
Must you know how much I
weight" exclaimed tho poor lady
piteously
"Most assuredly, ma'am. That
ranks above everything in case
such as yours"
'Oh, dear! Well, eff | must tell. l
must" replied Mrs Babbs with the
logic OF despair. and getting out her
handkerchief and c0vertly wiping
away o tear that would persist in
dimming her right eye. 1.-The las
time | weighed myself l teched 351
pounds, an / know I've gained senco
then. kin tell it by my-my dress. ="
Hum, hum" said the doctor. a
| CLEAN of satisfaction shooting from
his eyes, $50 you think you RS gain
ing all the time do you?"
I'm sartin of it, an swered Mrs.
nnh hnyNa1n1s io4 nd
making ponderous preparations to
resume her chair.
Don't sit down yet if you please,
Mrs. Babbs," said the doctor, hastily
rising. Il should like to measure
you first"
Mrs. Babbs sighed. The doctor
took tape measure from his pocket
and approached her.
"Let me see tho waist first,
think Yes-the waist-frst. Fiji
ty-one inches! Why, that's not bad.
not bad at all | must put that
down." calling the memorandum
book into play again. "Now the
arm, Mrs. Babbs-above the elbow.
Not quite eighteen inches!" he ex-
claimed, disappointedly. "You
ought to have a better arm than that
with such waist" he added with
some severity.
why. why what do you mean,
doctor9" inquired bewildered Mrs.
Babbs, sinking helplessly into her
chair.
LET me see, said tho doctor with
an distracted air paying no attention
! TO Mrs. Babb's remark. "Let me
see. Age, forty-four; height five
four; weight, three fifty-one; waist
fifty-two inches; arm, seventeen and
three-quarters. Won't do. I'm
afraid. Too old for much improve
ment and heights against her. Pity,
too. Good material. but not Guilt
waited properly No care taken of it
too bad. Do you eat plenty of
good fattening food, Mrs. Babbs-
potatoes. mush and so 3n?"
Goodness gracious me" CAPPED
Mrs Babbs. "What air you talkin'
about. doctor? Do you s'pose want
to git any fatter n | am? l thought
you was going ter do suthin' for me
that would lean me down? / can't
un'erstan' your
Mrs. Babbs clutched the arms of
her chair in dire confusion of mind
and looked anxiously at the doctor
for a comforting reply.
But that individual reiterated hasti-
| ly to the other side of the room.
The woman's as mad as a March
hare" he calculated, peering about
for some convenient exit in case of
necessity.
Mrs. Babbs arose from her chair
quive ing like a huge moulo of jelly
with rage.
"See here" she said sternly, trans
fixing the unhappy man with her
| flaming eyes, II want ter know what
all this performance means. Hev
you come hare ter make game of me
or hev you come ter measure me fer
them 'lectric things you made sech a
fuss about in your letters as bein so
wonderful great in gittin' rid o. fat?"
sc d save us, madam" answered
the bewildered doctor. Il know
nothing of the electric things you
are pleased to mention.
What" screamed Mrs. Babbs, re-
eoiling from him. "Ain't you DR..
Magnito?"
"Good Lord! No madame, no! My
name is Grampus-Eugene Grampus,
veterinary surgeon and general
manager OF Ripp & Tipp's great
collection of living curiosities.
"Wh-what" gasped Mrs. Babbs,
more dazed than ever. Then what
bizness hev you ter be a-measurin'
me an askin' all-all sorts of imper.
tinent questions about me, l sh'd
like ter know"
"Why. my dear madame, thought
you expected me. / thought, by the
kind reception you gave me, that the
young man who informed me of you
had also informed you of my in
| tended visit. "
Young manp Errand? Explain
yourself, sir. I'm sure | can't uner-
stan you" said Mrs. Babbs, hopping
her dripping brow.
"Why, young man from this
place. can't recall his name at this