The Laurens advertiser. (Laurens, S.C.) 1885-1973, 1893-07-18
GOLD AND SILVER.
An Interesting Dialogue Between the
Precious Metals.

AL interesting dialogue the
Precious Metals.
Characters Mr.. Goldbug and Miss
Silver.
Mr.. Gold. Chow do you do, Miss
Silver 1 hope you are we'll"
Miss Silver. "How dare you speak
to me,,' DO you suppose I will shake
hands with you? You have prosecuted
me for the last5 so years and you are try
ing to drive me out of the country"
Mr.. G. You surely have wronged
me l have never been guilty of such
q thought or action. Have 1 not been
your bosom friend since the dawn OF
civilization ? Have we not been piled
up together in chest, safe and vault ?
Did not mankind squeeze us together
in q pocket-book, and you never holler-
ed? Did l not give you part of my
gloss SO you could pass gilded as q
ever l begrudge when you looked so
nice and clean ?"
Miss S. "Wel Well! The recent
reverses to me have upset my con-
stitutiOn. Perhaps ] am mistaken. It
may not be your fault, but how comes it
that the whole world is down on me 2"
Mr.. G. "If you had watched the
change in civilization, you would have
seen how the world became enlighten-
ed through reading. They don't
bow down to gold and silver idols as
they formerly did. You also loaned
yourself to your Yankee friends who
base metals. They made so much
counterfeit of you, that you lost the
worlds esteem"
Miss s.. THAT same thing can be
said of you. These very Yankees in
vented an electric apparatus and used
your gloss. You gilt every substance,
even the glass and chinaware in our
colors."
Mr.. G. "That is so. 1 have thought
of these things. lately. / also may lose
my standing in finance. The steam
n the water power are now employed
in mining all kinds of metals, and the
crushing and cleaning machines have
taken the place of human labor, so that
price than formerly. Besides, the
world don't pay SO much devotion to
the metallic mammon. You will hard
ly find a Nation which will make O.
golden calf and worship it,"
Miss ). MY dear Mr.. Gold. I
must beg your pardon. | see that it is
not your fault that I am in trouble and
despised and declared unfit for nv
former standing. What must I do ?''
Mr.. G. ~ really do not know yet
what u prospects are for the future.
Capitalists, nowadays, don't care much
for either of us. They don't hoard and
lock us up or honor us as before. They
pay their devotion to bonds, stocks,
shares, bills Of exchange, title deeds,
and paper money. They claim these
are easier to handle. They can store
these in iron safes in their offices, and
they say a $1,000 bill can be produced
as cheap as u 81 bill"
Miss S. "What will then become of
us? Who will console us for our lost
honors? Tell me, my dear Mr.. Gold,
have you any idea what has brought on
the present crisis and so many failures
among the American banks and capita
lists?
Mr.. G. 81 did it. ! want them pun
ished for your sake, because they slight
you and worship greenbacks and other
paper money, and don't shew any re-
gard for you. I really cannot see what
we can do to regain our former fame.
We must be reconciled, return to
Mother Earth from whence we came,
and take o long, long rest until another
deluge m and wipes out ell the liv-
ing creation and %reproduces a new
Eve n Adam"