The Providence news. (Providence [R.I.]) 1891-1906, 1893-11-20

Is the village grocery, where he can hud-
die oyer A warm fire. chew tobacco, smoke
and draw the long bow TO his hearts de-
iight. Yarns that would put Sindbad and
Nunchausen 20 blush are often related at
these gatherings, aud every town has its
champion romancer, who IL generally
known as "the biggest gosh darn liar in
the state. by gumn Sometimes his yarns
are really artistic, but very often they are
so utterly preposterous as to be ridiculous.
There were 10 or l2 of us gathered about
roaring wood Gre, sitting on nail kegs
and boxes, away downin Maine one bitter
night, and the storT telling was under
full headway when led Smith, the young
est Of the party, began 20 boast about how
much he could lift. At this, an old fell
low with grizzled beard dyed with tobacco
juice straightened up ,and cleared his
throat with rasping sound that attracted
the attention OK every one aud caused sun
dry significant nudges and winks TO pass
around the circle.
'Spealin abaout liftin," began the old
timer, ina half sueering way; boys naow
hain't whut they ustcr be, not by long
shot. f"
Jed Smith resented this, but the DID
man cut him on sharply, continuing;
y
body else have u chaince. Naow, say wa
old feIers, any Of MS, could "a lifted any
OF these young spraouts who think they're
so dad fred smart an their hull diddly
darn load. uster be quite lad, though
some of We mightn't think il now the
roomytiz an newrdl,gy have taken the
snap an vinegar aout of me. But didl
got n record liftin back heels, an there
warm no body in 0our taown could hold
candle 10 me, by goldingl
"l}ut the biggest thing i ever did i done
the first time 1 was in Boston. i was
wallkin along the road past ono of them
air rippin tall buildin's what was jest
bein put up, an stopped TO see the men
kerry up brick an mortar Some of them
fellers didn't kerry up no more'n l2 brick,
an the most that any kerried was "a. lt
Jest made me sick 10 see 'cm climbin mp an
daown them long ladders saclSin sech
little loads, SO up an says, says /; why
don't you fellers kerry up moro brick
while ye're abaout IL, an then yo won't
hev 10 20 so oftiug
"Well, you'd oughter seen them critters
look at mel One as seemed 10 be the
boss, he KEN raound an axed haow men
ny brick cal lated i could kerry up TO the
top stagin. 'Oh, abaout so ur CO. says
/, offhand. Il mean to once says he.
AN l mean to once,' says i. Well, ser,
he up an offered 20 bate 500 to s5 /
couldn't kerry up GO brick TO ono load I
took the bate on tho spot, an / beat him
fair an square.
How'd ye do It, Uncle Joep" one Of
the listeners ventured to inquire rs the
old man paused and seemed TO consider
his story finished.
"Do it" snorted the old man disgust
edly. "Why, kerried 'em upl How'd ye
think done itf i jest climbed right up
with the brick"
"But a reg'lcr bod won't hold GO brick. -
"Course it won'tl Think don't know
thatl Think I'm diddly blinked fool i
he'd one built 'speshually for the job. But
KEN mighty nigh losin, arter all, f" he
added refectively, eye see, it wur like
this: Them air ladders was hitched one
top the other right up fer eight stories
jest as straight as they could go, an they
was nigh plumb pupendic'ler. i will say
it was powerful hard pull, an / wur
BLOWN like hoss with the heaves by the
time 1 reached the top. An then, jest
when was goin to step Off the ladder, a
raound broke. Well, you'd oughter seen
me come daown that ladder with thar
tarnal big hod Of brick on my shoulderl
My feet went tipperty tap, tipperty tap, an
they broke out every raound of the ladder
fast as they struck 'em. Clean daown
TO the graound went, an by thutterl i
druv my feet right daown inter the hard
earth purity nigh 10 inchesl 1t liketer
bruck my back, but remembered the bate,
an so pulls out my feet an right up that
air ladder i went at run, an never
stopped till dumped the hull 60 brick at
the top, by guml"
Having concluded, Uncle Joe began to
gnaw away at plug of black tobacco,
apparently quite unconscious that the lis
teners were looking from one To another
and holding back a roar of laughter with
the greatest difficulty. After IA moment
Jed Smith vcntured 10 say:
'Why, uncle, thought you briick aout
ev'ry raound of the ladder when you KEN
daown' Haow'd you ever git up that lad
der ag'ip with that load of brick2"
"Shinned up the side pieces, you diddly
hanged idjitw squealed the old man.
And everybody howled.