The Columbus journal., 1893-06-21
A FAMILY DINNER.

taurant the other evening when Smith
came in.
..Hello!" he cried in his breezy
manner. "Do you eat in this placer"
Sometimes" l replied. why
notp It's the best place l know"
lis it.? Then I'm sorry for you, "
said Smith, as he dropped into q
chair and gave a hurried order to the
waiter.
..Why! What is the matter with
the place." / asked in real astonish-
meDt
.sOh, nothing particular, any more
than with any other place. They're
all alike. If by any miracle they get
anything fit to eat, they spoil it in
the cooking. 1 suppose they
wash their pots and pans occa-
sionally in halfway decent place
like this, but yet, for some reason or
other, everything you get in any
given restaurant has some composite
and indescribable flavor peculiar to
the place-a sort of trade mark, as it
were.
Tell you what, old man; come up
and dine with us tomorrow. No
seventeen-coursea affair, all fuss and
feathers and nothing to eat, you know,
but just a plain family dinner. You
must have forgotten what one tastes
like. And l can promise you more
fun than you'd get at any show in
town. / believe in having things
lively at the table. 1t is a good deal
better than nerve tonics and pepsin
and it doesn't cost a cent. What!
Going? Here comes my dinner. and /
shall have to eat it alone in this hor-
rible place. You wouldn't see me
here except that I've got an engage
ment in Brooklyn tonight and didn't
have time to go home. Well, so long,
Don't fail me tomorrow at $50
sharp"
There is no use in trying to decline
Smiths invitations or combat his
statements. as knew from long ex-
perience, wherefore | allowed myself
to he taken captive, and on the fol-
lowing evening at $3.50 sharp delivered
myself. as per order, at his house.
Mrs. Smith, a nervous little woman
whom had met once or twice before,
welcomed me and said that Mr.. Smith
had not yet come home, but she sup
posed he would come soon; but yet
she wasn't sure, he was often kept so
late by business, and then they lived
SO far up town and the cars were so
often delayed, and if there is one
point in the city further from the
elevated than the house she believed
it was the office, and besides the
elevated wasn't very much better,
anyway, and it was shame the way
the taxpayers were imposed on, hav-
ing their streets torn up and their
houses filled with dust and yet
packed into crowded cars and
couldn't get home till midnight, and
If she were a man she would try to
do something. and she often talked to
Charles like this. but he only laughed
at her. 1t occurred TO me that
Charles must have q SUMMER dispo-
sition, even, than l had given him
credit for.
tits my impression that she touched
on few other points, but l may be
mistaken. Perhaps she merely en-
larged upon these, for Smith only
kept US waiting half an hour. and
part of that time was taken up by a
discussion between 14-year-old Tom
and 12-year-old Blanche concerning
the right and title to certain books,
and dissertation on cough syrups by
Mrs. Smiths unmarried sister, who
was much addicted to indulgence in
those seductive beverages.
The time was SO fully occupied
that was greatly surprised when
Smith entered like breath of fresh
air and said it was o'clock. !
thought it was 10.
He brought friend with him.
bob White. Why, Brown, you
surely remember old Bob White.
Used to be with Chappit & Snider
when we were youngsters ever so
many years ago"
And with this summary intrOduc-
tion we sat down to dinner.
..Sorry I'm so late" said Smith.
..but one of those everlasting takers
came in just as / was starting and
kept me half an hour. l can't see,
for my part, how a man can be SO in
love with the sound of his own voice.
alt was just that-nothing else in
the world. He knew didn't care q rap
about what he was saying, and that
he was boring me half to death. Yet
he kept on a full head of steam, and
had to put on the throttle myself.
Told him always got lecture fol
being late at dinner. Put it all or
you. my dear, Ha! ha! Now l car
talk myself, although-hellO! this
soups cold, and / swallowed nearly
all of mine before l noticed it. IT.:
enough to give fellow a chill
What's the matter with the cook
anyway"
But, Charles" suggested Mrs
Smith, deprecatingly, '.you were 81
late, you know, and'-
.Oh, all my fault, of course. But
don't see why man should be com
PEELED to eat frozen victuals if he i
late. That cook doesn't know hel
business. I'll discharge her mex
week. Never mind, lets try the fish
We'll, as l was saying. lean tall
myself if it's necessary. though In
not much of a talker. But l gener
ally have something to say when l d.
talk, and have some consideration
for other people-now what are yo,
youngsters fighting about?"
Tom has hidden all the book
that Uncle John brought us, ant
won't even let me read one, and
I know Uncle john
That's right, baby" interrupt
Tom, with fine scorn. .'cry about ii
l wouldn't be such a tell-tale for''-
Here. herer' roared Smith. IN
wrangling at the table. l don't car
whose books they are, but the frs
one l hear another word out G
PIP
He didn't say what he would dc