The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1893-09-24
ROUND The WORLD IN so MINUTES.

Alexander CONQUERED the world in his
time. julius Caesar met his Brutus IN bis
time, Columbus discovered the new
worId' in his time. but it was left for the
average Kansas editor to 60 round the
world in 80 minutes Last week he arrived
and thought himself equal to tho occasion.
He tackled every way station for Tree
pass" and the above was the result, that
is, if he had his photograph, card, and
his credentials with him. He discovered
the entrance to the world in ten minutes,
conquered the gate keeper in
fifteen minutes, made his way
to the Columbian IntIamurai railway
in five minutes entered the cars ard made
the circuit in twenty minutes. rms peat
the decentralization of the globe ''in the
good old way" thousand per cent. and
he filled his knowledge box" with notes
and points that he cannot wire out OF his
intellectual labratory in lifetime, but
ne can tell some thing in few sentences
that your wide-awake reporter may not
have thought worthy Of mention.
The free ride on the "whales back.
rendered by Barnhardt Bros. Is Spindler
of the Great Western Type foundry may
have caused many to dodge the great re-
sponsbility of the first round, but
not swallow Neither did the
Ferris wheel catch all, at the first turn,
but we arrived In time to count the thirty
sixth coach as 1t came revolving Down
from its immense height of $50 feet. laden
with some of the brightest lnteilectS OF
Kansas soil, with the gentleman from
Wichita left out. But somebody counted
the last number on the immense revolving
coaches, engaged another man and boz
10 help him see TO the top, and then went
10 see the California ostrich farm and the
Arab horses, and then the Laplanders'
village.
Two of our company, one OF whom had
never enjoyed good oid-fashioned sleigh,
ride, III pair of bob sieds niied
viii hay. buffalo robes and
nretty girls took in the experience or a
sleighride in September. While somebody
son aud somebody's daughter STOOD and
looked wistIUily after tue retreatlng
sIeighriders because they did not have a
fur cap and hood suited TO the occasion.
Our daughter, ON her return, SAID don
wear silk hat aud IA buttonhoie bouquet
when you go sieighriding In Lapiand and
we oon't intend to. The frost on tue
neptlemen's whiskers told the story In
advance.
During the time Of the sleighride we
were meditateng on the probable politics
of the overseer of the ostricheS and how we
might secure the best claim in the Chero-
kee strip, If we had an ostrich TO ride at
.'the opening" But round the world is
better than the heat Of desperately con-
tested race for home. especiaiiy II you
hay. a 'season ticket" But we can't get
rid OF the ostrich scene hastily, nor the
names of the o,trches. The largest aud
blnckest was called jim Blaine, the
pinned Knight" His plumage was
beautiful to behold and ne never showed
the white feather.
john \. Logan came next and was
more berutiful than BLACK JACK IL pos
slbe.
frhaD came Grover Cleveland who
seemed to be almost entirely overcome with
the careworn gray" plumage. His keeper
said Grover was mad ever since be had
heard from home aud II was Il girl lie
can't conceive how the president OF the
Uulled States, fifty years hence, can De
woman He mad forgotten that ne had
sister who wrote a better article on Keel
nroc;tyn than he himself could write on
Free Trade" and "Ia-iu Is not Ia MS
encyclopedia
Speaking of kicking. there were three
donheys in with The ostFicnes. one OF
which was called Christopher Columbus.
because OF his ability to ges there Ia spite
of the ostrichan kicGers. \ lame ostrich
was named Harrison. because ne hal oeea
kicked by Grover last faii
Turning 10 politics IN the Midway
PIslsancr,' il will be seen how soon we
uaf Temporarily forgotten our mp
Aronud The World IN Fifty Minutes, AMI
/ fell by ih- wiles OF tue teSiiehinE
+ c,sstani-s Of th- worls.'s congress 81
! ieaulv.n Bat after We recovered and had
again returned 10 our hotel, the Mecca
[ ii oar first pilgrimage, aud again met tue
+ beautiful Kansas gators wives, sisters
( ,,+ tsut,s,,ars ot1r rlnetlea. box was ring
F iay with the following s,auZt:
beautiful girls. with silken hair,
Cllssk> ike. roses AID iiIs> - rare.
Ewes . brilliant and {acss - fair,
s1sO4 art Cl4sesso : neIr-
/ julius,