People's party paper. [volume] (Atlanta, Ga.) 1891-1898, 1893-03-17
CORRESPONDENCE.
CHARACTER SKETCHES.
The Very Old Philosopher Draws a
Picture from Life.

State of " Hit Your Mother, etc., Du'
don't hit the Democratic Party,
there sprang into existence some time
in the past, tropical being who has
and now tries to flourish like the
scriptural green bay tree.
This worlds ways proves that al
great possibilities are characteristic
so the above tropical being grew most
strikingly characteristic, and his char
acteristic is not founded on the fact
that his name is Smith-it is Colonel
Assumption now.
In his earlier days Colonel Assump-
ton realized that within himself there
dwelt greatness-blessed realization
The Colonel knew that greatness al
ways begins at the bottom round OF
the ladder, so in his early professional
career he migrated to the upper wards
of Blacktown and settled down. He
did this because, quoth he, "Here !
find the daily toilers too busy in pro
viding daily bread to think for them
selves. What hindereth me from
coming among them-even doing
their thinking. Here | will find room
in which to expand. With my many
wonderful and God given talents, un-
disturbed by their personal opinions,
personal reasoning or CLEANED infor-
nation, can weave these inhabitants,
and especially these goters according
to nay oaon desires. Soon they will
think as I thipab, drink as I drink,
believe as Z believe, and vote as !
DICTATE. Original idea! -
Colonel Assumption chung to this
original idea; soon began to weave,
and soon the cloth was seemingly all
wool and a yard wide by his measure
stick. His tutorage continued, and
reaped for him personal and political
advancement, gain and renown. Oh
how he fourished! The earth smiled
for him, the horizon above FURNISHED
itself in white, red and gold. Colonel
Assumption dreamed and realized
happiness.
Under prosperity's smiling the
Colonel became fat and sassy. Peo-
pie of his great type are not neoes-
sarily preponderant in avoirdupoise.
can't say why he's fat-unless the
physical body ran riot in vain en-
deavor to keep in sight of his ex-
panding brain. Sassiness naturally
goes with fairness. I think he was
raised sassy, because his ancestors
assumed that sassiness is a mark OF
smartness.
In little while around about the
Colonel any observer could gee signs
of Importance that said, "I'm some.
thing" Even the little street gamins
that he passes see this in open.
mouthed astonishment. After he
passes me I look up and above to see
the hight of his ascension, then hurry
in a precipitous manner to my home,
examine every deed and the last bill
to see that everything is mine. ]
find them still mine, but I ponder
can anything he passes belong to me
It's ridiculous, but an irresistible
feeling.
There's inspiration in contemplate
ing the walk of Colonel Assumption
since he has been enjoying renown and
prosperity. Watch him cross the
street. He takes short, firmly pomp-
Gus and briskly important step. He
throws his head back, way back, and
this tits the anterior and pendent
portion of his anatomy alarmingly
forward. He has an astonishing way
of throwing his right hand, gesture
like, in salutation of passing friend
Speak no more of inspiration!
Meet the Colonel; have the pleas
ure of one short conversation, and
you will ever pin your faith on him.
For days you will murmur " marvel
ous!" Such vast perceptions, such
pompous dignity, such off-hand wit,
such ponderous intelligence will daz-
zle and bewilder you for days. So
many wonderful traits and possIbili.
ties combined in one man seems an
impossible fact.
Like all great men, the Colonel was
not always appreciated. Let us hope
that the ignorance of his constituents
was accountable therefor. In the
very midst of smiling earth, FURNISHED
horizon, dreams and realization OF
happiness, the people took mighty
move, antedated their lethargy and
began to think, drink, believe and
vote according to their own ideas.
CONSERVATION! The Colonel was
astonished beyond expression-even
annoyed. Earth no longer smiled
so brightly, the punishment of the
horizon became furnished and uncer-
tainty shrouded the dreams and real
ization of happiness. Rude awaken
ing for the Colonel The people
were cruelty unconcerned about the
ColonePs welfare.
cit never rains but what it pours,'
and upon the top of this, in opposi
ton to the ColonePs favorite candi.
date for Congress "a Democracy, there
arose Populist nominee, and, hor.
rors his past friends and toleratlng
constituents began to flock to the
c,1r,oo,,f Of 4bo poOv1;,A