The times. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1890-1903, 1893-08-13

who viii not guard his wiie from tna'
| II he can; and l could. but did not, for
the sake of my appetite.
at last there came DAY IKE thai
when / borrowed the money from Ennis
| only far more serious II was wednesday.
/ and the polite collector had mentioned
| Friday-the day when men are hanged
| as the probable occasion OF Illuminating
| experience for me. After many heart
| breaking disappointments L raised the
necessary amount. 1 had preserved my
connection with Alien e. Graves. and was
still In charge Of their New York office.
| but my position was In Jeopardy because
OF my habits, and my salary was over
drawn and squandered. ] borrowed that
money of one of our customers. Andy
Gleason. You know him. He said that
he wanted TO talk business Andy cam
not talk business comfortably except In
n liquor saloon. The demon inside me
welcomed him az n friend. Here was GER
tainiy an excuse. IT was matter Of
business to preserve my friendly rela-
tons with Andy.
"The next thing i remember distinctly
is opening my eyes In total darkness.
thought at first that I was blind. How
Tong it took me to discover where I was
] am unable to say. In reality, l was ly-
Ing in the little vestibule OF my Office.
door and turned on the electric light.
My watch had stopped, but from the win
dow / could see the illuminated dial in
the tower Of the City Hall. 1t was near
ly midnight.
"But what midnight I had no idea
whether / had been unconscious three
days or a month. My mind was so stu
pefled that / could not ascertain the date
OF any Of the ways which would have
suggested themselves 10 me in my normal
condition. There was q newspaper on my
desk. My eyes rested upon 1t without in
tent. but at least one word seemed TO
detach Itself from the page. 1t was the
day Of the week in the date line Of the
paper, and that day was Friday. Then II
was already too late.
There was a pistol In a drawer OF my
desk, and somehow, though my hands
trembled so that l could hardly hold
key. / managed TO open the lock and at
last 10 secure the weapon. Yet Il seemed
an idle and cowardly thing TO do-to die
without a struggle. 10 accept the conse-
quences Of my fall as final. I put the
pistol into my pocket and FASTENED from
the Office. But one thought was In my
mind, TO learn the worst at once. She
would forgive me certainly. Ever
brother can claim seventy times seven,
and j with far more potent night would
plead again. This fall should be my last.
'It seemed / was at home as IL by
magic. The key turned In the street
door, I climbed the dark stairs and
came TO the third landing GREATNESS
with my haste. The small key turned
in the lock but the door did not open.
There was nothing alarming about that;
Alice often used the second lock 10 make
herself more secure.
he
There was no response. / listened.
Surely there was a confused sound with
in, murmur as Of the weeping OF one
who is exhausted with the shedding OF
tears. 1t was almost a relief to find
that she was there. We had no friends
TO whom she could 90 I'm an emergency,
but II the rooms were bare she might
have taken refuge even with compare
tive strangers. i spoke her name again.
II seemed as II the noise within ceased.
1 thought that she was coming 10 the
door, but she did not. Certainly she had
heard me-
did she deliberately exclude me? Had
she learned Of my debauch? Had / been
guilty OF something more dlsgracefUl
than drunkenness! In the darkness
which concealed the last three days
what madness and folly lay, forgotten
but irrevocably written in my past? But
perhaps she was asleep. l made loud
noise at the door, as loud as 1 dared,
fearing TO let the other inmates Of the
house know Of my disgrace. There was
no answer.
Confused alarmed, and utterly sick
at heart. l sank down upon the floor and
sat there leaning against the wall,
do not know how long. At times l felt
resentment against her, and then l excused
my own fault with weak arguments
again. / fell into AFFECT pleading, with
nay lips almost against the door. And
then, in desperation. thought OF the
weapon in my pocket, and was on the
brink OF death. Yet through It all one
idea grew stronger as the others faded;