Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1893-08-28
JUST FOR FUN.

Inc UQ0rInOm0I0I Is dA CACOOoiASAy
valuable invention, but it adds to the
misery of great many people.
1t is a strange meteorological fact
| that the sun never shines so hot on
baseball ground as on the harvest
| field.
Perhaps some of our readers would like to
know in what respect Chamberlain's Cough
Remedy is better than any other. We will
tell you When this Remedy is taken as soon
as cold has been contracted, and before it
has become settled in the system,it will count
eract the effect of the cold and greatly lessen
it's severity, and it is the only remedy that
VIII do this. 1t acts in perfect harmony with
nature and aids nature in relieving the lungs,
opening the secretions, liquefying the mucus
and causing its expulsion from the air cells of
the lungs and restoring the system to strong
and healthy condition. No other remedy in
the market possesses these remarkable prop
critics. No other will cure cold so quickly
For sale by H. G. Pierce. druggist.
City Sportsman = Have you seen
anything worth shooting at around
here? Farmer Well, not till you
came
Old Friend-What in the world in
duced you to call that child Revenge?
Mother did it because every one
says Revenge is sweet.
He bitterly All women
are alike! She-Then why in the world
do you spend so much time trying to
find the one you want to marry?
BUcKLEN's ARN1cA SALvE.-The Best salve
Salt Rheum, Fever Sores, letter, Chapped
Hands, Chilblains, Corns, and all Skin Erup-
tions, and positively cures Piles, pay
quired. 1t is guaranteed to give perfect sat
isfaction, or money refunded. Price 25 cents
per box. For Sale by II. c. Pierce.
Husband My dear, our club is 60
lug to have all homescomforts. Wife
Is that so? And when is our home go
ing to have all the club comforts?
Robbins-I'm just back from Chi
cago and -Dobbins old fell
low, am sorry, but Pm so tied up fl
nancially I can't lend you a cent.
Arnica & Oil Liniment is very healing and
soothing, and does wonders when applied to
old sores.
darling? Mabel was just thinking,
dearest, that this was the last even
ing we could be together until to- NOR
row.
had catarrh of the head and throat for five
years. used Ely's Cream Balm, and from
the first application I was relieved. The
sense of smell, which had been lost, was
stored after using bottle. I have found
the Balm the only satisfactory remedy for ca
tarrh, and it has effected cure in my case
II. L. Meyer, Waverly, N. Y.
"Papa, do men descend from mon
keys?" eyes, my boy" "And what
about the monkeys?" Puzzled Pater-
s'The monkeys descendant from the
trees"
"Say, mamma, I want to tell you
something" eyes, dear?" 81 learned
something new to day" "That is my
own bright boy. What was it?' 'I've
forgotten"
common cold should not be negls cted.
Downs Elixir will cure it.
A poet sent to an editor a contribu
ton entitled, ''Why do I live?" The
editor answered, because you sent
your contributions by mail instead of
bringing it.''
Guest = But what does this extra
charge of 50 mean? Landlord The
chambermaid says she found you
bathed in tears. We always charge
50 for bath.
Deserving Praise.
DESERVING PRA1sE.-We desire to say to our
citizens, that for years we have been selling
DR.. Kings New Discovery for Consumption,
DIR. Kings New Life Pills, Bucklens Arnica
Salve and Electric Bitters, and have never
handled remedies that sell WE'LL that
have given such universal satisfaction. We
do not hesitate to guarantee them every time
and stand ready to refund the purchase
price, if satisfactory results do not follow
their use. These remedies have won their
great popularity purely on their merits Fl.
Pierce, Druggist.
'Papa," said lad the other night,
aafer attentively studying for some
time an engraving of human skele-
ton, chow did this man manage to
keep in his dinner?"
Wool-After starving for twenty
years, old Potts conceived an idea
which resulted in making his fortune.
Van Pelt-What was it? Wool-Chang-
ed the sign over his shop from junk
to Antiques
The advertising of Hoods Sarsapari11a APP
peals to the sober, common sense Of thinking
people, because it is true; and it is always
fully substantiated by endorsements which in
the financial world would he accepted with
ont q rnnnnant,S hesitation rI,hn, TIL 4bo r4o