The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1893-07-26

80. ~aalGlIU
WE RETIRE TO THE SUBURBS.
nance. had not learned by expe-
rience what it is to be so tired that
lying fiat on ones back seems like
violent exercise. / caught doctor on
the street where he couldn't reasona-
bly, charge me large fee-or, if he
did, he couldn't collect it because can
run faster than he can-and I asked
for his advice. I laid my case before
him, and he said: ''You must take a
long vacation. Go away and stay
away all summer. You won't be fit for
work till you do"
1t was the old story of the fret-saw.
/ told Maude about it. Husbands
should confide in their wives. am an
open-hearted beast, and never fail to
tell her anything that will make her
miserable. But if a man pays me five
dollars unexpectedly I salt it away in
my inside vest pocket because l may
need it.
"Poor old Howdy," she said, and l
began to feel very bad for myself; you
must have little fresh air. Suppose
we go out into the suburbs for few
weeks"
Now, strictly speaking, New York
hasn't any suburbs. There IS West
chester county; but Water Commits
sioner Daily, you will remember, went
up there recently to remove the
nuisances, and they say very little of
the country remained when he got
through. There is New Jersey, but 1
have been there. Then we have Brook
lyn, where good many people live,
and its vast outlying region of ceme-
teries which many Of the judicious
seem to have preferred. Connecticut
has certain attractions and very su-
perior quality OF malaria, but it costs
eleven dollars a minute to ride out
there on the n. Y, n. Il. & II. R. r.
Ii the last II in that name stood for
Heaven it would seriously impair even
my chance Of getting there.
People who live in such city as
Boston-which has such charming sub
urbs that one fails to understand why
it has not long ago been entirely de-
serted in their favor-do not realize the
difficulties under which we labor here.
However, Maude found place on the
south shore of Long Island. 1t is
called Quahog. Her friends, the Browns,
went there last year, and they said it
was perfectly lovely. learn, however,
that they are not going again. We
moved down there. 1t really is cool.
The first evening we were there a sea
fog came in, and covered everything
with cold white slime. sat on the
piazza awhile and pretended to enjoy
it, along with our landlord, who
praised the sea breeze immoderately.
You should have seen how he flung
open his coat, and let the wind blow
on his chest. I learned afterwards
that the willy old sinner had on two
suits of underclothes and a chest pro-
tector. AS for me, got violent cold.
The next morning was delightfully."-
cool. Something called me to the city
Just after breakfast. It may have
been hunger, but I do not remember
/ got aboard the train. We are sup
posed to be fifty minutes from city
hall, New York. The distance really
ought to be covered in that time,
think, by a cannon-ball. Ten miles
out of town it began to be hot. AS we
nearcd Brooklyn the engineer put out
the fire in his engine, and ran her the
rest of the way by the sun on the boil
er. There were seventy-five people in
my car, besides those that were sitting
down. We connected with al elevated
railroad and then with three or four
other things, each one hotter than the
last, and eventually got to the Brook
lyn bridge, where we enjoyed ride
over that magnificent structure, and
also the pleasure Of standing on one an
others toes while we did so. l got
thoroughly heated in New York; and
then l returned to Qua,.og surrounded
by all the comforts which / have hith-
erto described. The sea fog was wait
ing for me, but / had bought five
pounds of quiniae in New York and
hoped to stave off a cold. Maude said
it had been hotter in Quahog at noon
than she had ever known it in New
York. did not do any writing in
Quahog that night. 1t was too cold.
The next day it was too hot On the
following day had to go to the city,
and that occupied all my time. On the
whole, my vacation seems further off
than ever.
But can go any time wish an
my own boss Nobody can set apart
a week for me and call il my vacation.
can set aside the whole summer for
it: and be lucky if | get two days of
real rest HOWARD FIELDING