Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1893-09-23
Two Gentlemen of
Verona.
ocopyrighted by hampers Weekly.

Why, they are the best boys i'm Verony.
and FOR a little place Nerony win show
up more for fine feIlere than any town
/ know of.
"F1nelookin %fellerS, amt they
Don't know which is the bcst-lookin'.
Some fe.lers think Ed is, and some
think Clarence is. l presume Eds
folks think he is the bcstlookin', and
Clareucc's folks think he is,
Both of 'cm are fine speakers. Don't
know which is the best. Mobile Ed is
the best, and mcbbe Clarence is !
presume Ed could speak Marco Boz
zariS' better than Clarence, and that
Clarence could lay out Ed sivin spar
tacuS to the Carthaginians.'
Both Of 'em are good hunters.
DON'T know which is the best. Ed is
good; 50 is Clarence. / presume that
on his fathers farm out in MiuneSoty
Clarence would kin more rabbits than
Ed could, but up round Ncrony Ed
would git more pa'tridgcs than Clar-
ence would. On "a bear, one of the
common black kind we have up round
Nerony. ! presume Clarence would he
the best, though mebbe he wouldn't;
but if one of them big cinnamon-bears
took after EN-. Ed would he the boy
to fix him, / think, though mcbbe he
wouldn't.
Great fellcrS to smoke. Don't know
which smokes the most, Nebbe Ed
does; mebhe Clarence does. ! presume
that up to the Farquharson's ON sun
day afternoons Clarence would smoke
more with his meerschaum; but ont
campin' with lots Of skeeterS round.
YOU can bet Ed would use up tobacco
with his old briar.
"Great fcllerS for athletics. Great
wl1stlerS, Don't know which is the
best. Mebbe Ed is: mebbe Clarence is.
/ presume if Ed got Clarence foul
with an under-holt. and Clarence was
kline r uuprepared, he would put him ON
his lack; but If Clarence should jump
on Ed when he warn't lookiu'. cit his
arms round him before lac knew it and
sort of twist him oven like, probably
Ed would 90 down.
Both of EN- are dressy fellcrs. BY
cry night at seven O'Clock they PUT ON
their Prince Albert coats and 90 up
town. But 1t amt to see the girls.
They swore Off on that, and l win tell
YOU why.
1T is several years . now that
! went to work for old man DySpringer
in his general store: Dyspringcr &
BOokins is the firm since | went into
partnership; pyspringer run it all alone
then, ana | was only a clerk. I lived
at his house with him. He kent a
pet bulldog at the store nights. and
had me nc the house. He said there
warn't nothin' Il desperate character
would try 10 cit down to the store.
the most valuable things bein' six
dollar pants, while up TO the house
was all his cash and siIvcr-plated
ware, and he wouldn't risk the bull
dogs life guardin' them v~aluableS
against the kind Of v~illanous and de
termined men that would come after
'em. He had a daughter, old OFFSPRING
er had, a good-lOokin' sensible girl,
and Clarence and Ed were both after
her. / had always known Clarence
and Ed. SO | wished 'em good luck.
because whichever n got her would
Git a good Wife, and fall heir to a
large and varied stock of clothing.
hardware, soap, hair-ile, and every
thing else the inhabitants Of a town
like NerOny would be likely to buy.
d watched the courtin', and some
times | thought Ed was ahead, and
sometimes l thought Clarence was.
One day Mary-that was her name
asked me which one ] considered was
the most suitable for matrimOny. ]
told her I couldn't tel, rs two more
evenly matched fcllers in the virtues
and vices | never see. The only way
l could think of decidin' would be to
have some sort Of trial, she to be the
prize. She asked me to name the kind
Of trial. but ! was so unsettled IN my
mind about it that I couldn't name
] couldn't think Of any kind Of
trial in which either Of EN- was best.
and one Of 'em had to beat, you know
" Have EN- shoot at a mark, said
Mary,
" THAT might DO, said T.. Ed is q
fine shot with n rife, and Clarence
amt; but Clarence is such n blamed
lucky feller that he generally beats Ed
Have a shootin' match, said she.
Course we had to do it, and ! put
up a dry-goods box with a black bulls
eye on it out in Sanders COW pasture.
Ed hauled off and shot, and there was
his b|ullet-hole right in the bull's-eye.
Clarence aimed; his gun wobbled every
which way. but what did he DO but
send his bullet right through the anne
place FL shot. Never see the beat Of
that feller's luck. FL started out 70
claim that Clarence never hit the box
at an. but knew be did. His gun
used q smaller bullet than Eds, and
it went right through the hole without
touahin' the sides. Gosh! but Clarence
was lucky,
We'll. everybody in town heard
about The trial. and ia man Dy
pringer did too. He said be warn't
goin' to have his daughter made ridden
E q.