The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1893-09-29

charged the boys father with half a
pound Of cinnamon.
We'll do the goats bunt when you
nishiate a fresh candidate"
mo, Of course not. The goats are
cheap ones, that have no life, and we
muzzle them and put pillows over their
heads SO they can't hurt anybody" said
the grocery man as he winked at a broth
or Odd Fellow who was seated on a sug-
ar barrel, looking mysterious. but why
do you askg'
'Oh, nothin, only l wish me and my
chum had muzzled our goat with a pill
low. Pa would have enjoyed his becom-
ing n member Of our lodge better. You
see, Pa had been telling us how much
good the Masons and Odd Fellows did
and said we ought to try and grow up
good so we could jine the lodges when
we got big. and ! asked Pa if it would do
any hurt for us to have a play lodge in
my room and pretend to nishiate, and
Pa said it wouldn't do any hurt. He said
it would improve our minds and learn
us to be men. So my chum and me Dor.
ried "A goat that lives in a livery stable.
Say, did you know they keep a goat in a
livery stable SO the horses won't get sick:
They get used to the smell Of the goat,
and after that nothing can make them
sick but a glue factory. l wish my girl
boarded in a livery stable. Then she
would get used to the smell.
II went home with her from church
Sunday night, and the smell of the goat
on my clothes made her sick to her stun
mick, and she acted just like an excur-
sion IN the lake and said if I didn't 90
and bury myself and take the smell out
of me she wouldn't never go with me
again. She was just as pale as a ghost.
and the Precipitation ON her lip was Just
zif she had been hit by a street sprinkler.
You see, my chum and me had to carry
the goat up to my when Pa and Ma
was out riding. and he blatted so we had
to tie a handkerchief around his nose,
and his feet made such a noise on the
floor that we put some baby's socks on
his feet. Gosh, how "A goat smells, don't
it? l should think you Masons must
have strong stummix. Why don't you
have a skunk or a mule for a trademark:
Take a mule and anoint it with lin
burg cheese. and you could nishiate and
make a candidate smell just as bad az
with a gosh darn widowed goat.
Well, my chum and me practiced
with that goat until he could bunt the
picture of a goat every time. We bor-
ried a buck beer sign from a saloon man
and hung it on the back of a chair. and
the goat would hit it every time. That
night Pa wanted to know what we were
doing up in my room. and l told him we
were playing lodge and improving our
minds. and Pa said that was right.
There was nothing hat did boys of our
age half SO much good as to initiate men
and store by useful nollidge. Then my
chum asked Pa if he didn't want to come
up and take the grand bumper degree,
and Pa LATED and said he didn't care il
he did just to encourage us boys in inno-
cent pastime that was SO improving to
our intellex. We had shut the goat up
in a closet in my room, and he had got
over blatting, so we took off the handker-
chief, and he was eating some of my pa
per collars and skate straps. We went
mp stairs and told Pa to come up Pretty
VOC and give three distinct raps. and
when we asked him who comes there he
must say, "A pilgrim who wants to join
your ancient order and ride the goat
Ma wanted to come, up too, but we
told her if she come in it would break
mp the lodge, cause a IN couldn't
keep a secret, and we didn't have In
side saddle for the goat. Say, if you
never tried it. the next time you nishiate
a man in your Mason's lodge you sprin.
kle a little Ryan pepper on the goats
beard just afore you turn him loose.
You can get three times as much fun to
the square inch Of goat. You wouldn't
think it was the same goat. Well. we
got all fixed and, Pa raped, and we let
him in and told him he must be blind
folded, and he got on his knees a-lafing.
and tied a towel around his eyes, and
then l turned him around and made him
get down on his hands also, and then his
back was right toward the closet door.
and l put the buck beer sign right
Pas clothes. He was a-lafing
all the time and said we boys were as
full OF fun as they made EN-, and we
told him it was a solemn occasion, and
wouldn't permit no levity, and if he
didn't stop lafiing we couldn't give him
the grand bumper degree.
'Then everything was ready, and my
chum had his hand on the closet door and
some kyan pepper in his other hand, and
! asked Pa in low bass tones if he felt as
though he wanted to turn back or IL he
had nerve enough to go ahead and take
the degree. / warned him that it was
full Of dangers, as the goat was loaded
bear, and told him he yet had time to
his steps if he wanted to. He
said he wanted the whole bizness, and we
could go ahead with the menagerie. Then
! said to Pa that If he had decided to 90
ahead and not blame us for the conse-
quences to repeat after me the follow
ing: Bring forth the royal bumper and
let him bump
g.