The Hocking sentinel. [volume] (Logan, Ohio) 1871-1906, 1893-03-09
EATING DINNER MECHANICALLY

EATING DINNER MECHANICALLY
Tho Waiter Does Everything But Swallow
the Food and Drink.
On recent evening big man with /;
heavy walk entered a well known cafe
on upper Broadway and sank wearily
into chair at a table. He was abou
fifty years old and had the appearance
of a high liver. His face had the pecu
liar purplish-red color which is some
times ascribed to burgundy and some.
times to champagne. but is always due
to indulgence of the appetite for good
things His movements indicated that
he felt sluggish, and it would have ere.
ated no surprise in the observer to have
been told that he was liable to apo.
plexy. He seemed preoccupied, and
glanced listlessly about the room.
Presently waiter came up to him. He
was about the san age as the man at
the table, but was quick and active.
| Good morning, Mr.. JONES'" he said,
briskly. "We have some nice turtle
soap aud some excellent roast grouse. ="
''All right, James," said the other,
| absent-mindedly.
"Some potatoes chateau and a lettuce
salad?"
"Yes."
The waiter went away and returned
presently with some illustrated papers,
which the man took from him without
SO much as looking up. The soup was
brought on and ladled out by the wait
er, who then took the napkin and
spread it carefully over the mans lap.
He brought ON a glass of sherry, al
though the man had said nothing about
it, and set it down beside his plate.
The man did not notice it, but began to
eat his soup greedily.
''You are forgetting your sherry, SIR"
said the waiter, respectfully.
Mechanically the diner reached out
and carried the glass to his lips. The
waiter watched him as carefully as
mother does her child, filled the glass
of water when it was empty, replaced
the napkin when it slipped down, and
in other ways saw to it that the diner
was comfortable. The soup was fol-
lowed by the roast, potatoes and some
celery. The latter had not been Or
dered, either The grouse was carved
by the waiter, who also served the DO
tatoes and picked out the tender pieces
of celery.
do you want your champagne, sir?"
he asked.
'What champagne?'' demanded tho
diner, querulously.
you have hal! bottle left from last
night. SIR"
Bring it on, then"
The waiter returned with a half
empty bottle. A rubber cork tightly
into the mouth had preserved
the sparkle Through the remainder
of the meal the waiter never relaxed
his watchfulness, although he had to
wait on two other tables. When the
diner had finished his coffee he started
to rise. The waiter, who happened to |
be at another table, rushed to his side. |
'Wait moment, Mr.. JONES'" he said;
you must take your pepsin.''
itY'
Right away, sir"
In moment he had rushed out of
The room and returned speedily with
bottle and spoon. He mixed up a dose
n a glass and handed it to the man,
who drank it with wry face. Then
,he waiter brought finger bowl and a
cigar, of which he cut off the end. He
waited until the man had slowly put it
between his lips and then he struck a
match and applied the light The man
'uffed SO slowly that the match had
burned down to the walters fingers
md scorched them before the cigar was
thoroughly lighted. The waiter now
Helped the man on with his overcoat,
'djusted his silk muffier, buttoned up
he coat and handed him his cane.
'Good night, Mr.. JONES'" said the
waiter, as the man toddled away. An
ndistinct mumbling was the only re-
'ly.
The head waiter explained. "That
nan JONES'" said he, '.has been coming
ere for fifteen years and always has
he same waiter. He's a grouty man,
ut not bad hearted. He's a chronic
yspeptic, but you see he won't deny
imself much. You noticed he didn't
ip the waiter? That's because he pays
i'm once week and generously. He I.
ays his meal checks the same way.
he waiter knows his habits absolute .
7, and, as you saw, does not require :
ny orders. He knows that he wants
srtain things always, and understands
is tastes well enough to be able to
lggest satisfactory menu every time. /;
have an idea the old fellow will re- .
ember his waiter in his will. He
ives him lots of presents, as we'll he .
light for the waiter does about everv- 7
hing except eat and drink for him. I