The Redwood gazette. [volume] (Redwood Falls, Minn.) 1873-1940, 1893-09-21

and AZ helves came to the county attor-
ney and said he did not wish to ind any
fault about itor make any arrests, but
some ono was stealing his wood at the
rate Of two cords per Month, and he
wanted to know the best course to pro
coed and still not commit a felony him
self. Would it be dangerous to load
some Of the sticks with powder? Would
he be liable or subject to arrest ID case
| If death or mayhem?
The county attorney thought it over
;or II minutes with lis w.liskers in his
mouth. He always ate off some Of his
whiskers while engaged in thought.
10, you would not be liable, think"
said he, 'sbut to avoid accidents to your
self or your family would load only
sticks Of white birch, Mr.. Jaggerson.
White birch is easily distinguished even
in tie night. and if you load only that
varsity your family circle will not have
notch il it this winter"
So the man went home and loaded
his wood pile for bear. but in his haste
he enormously loaded one stick of hick-
DRY.
That night the county attorneys Office
was burned t, the ground, together with
library con listing Of Hi:rs M.raal,
the Eensed Statutes for 1852. Horace
A. Tay lor on Diseases of the Horse
''The Liam WHO Sobered Up by Walt
Mason, and the government publications
on pork and its diseases.
The county attorneys opinion since
then has been of no value whatever, for
his whiskers were singed off by the ex-
plosion, and missing them to gnaw upon
while wrapped in thought his legal opin-
ion has been warped, and it is pitiful to
see him tackle simple question. run his
tongue out in search of q mouthful of
rich red whiskers, find only the place
where they were and then burst into
tears.
Numerous inquiries have been received
within the past summer regarding fu-
neral etiquette, etc. I here take the lib
erty therefore to insert piece of word
painting taken verbatim from an ex-
change, the names only having been
changed to avoid giving additional Of
Tense. The clipping itself is offensive
enough to drive mule from his midday
meal, but print it to show one-half the
world how the other half is permitted to
rush into print on the heels of death even
if ignored the rest of the time:
AUG. l, 1893
DEAR EDrrOR-The death angel has made it's
ingress into our quiet little city, snatching
from our midst one of our most deserving
and beloved citizens in the person of Mrs.
Judge Burstforth Balaam of East Tottawota-
mic, this state. After protracted illness she
departed to the Land of the Leal the morning
of the 25th. Funeral 9th at above place. Serv-
ices conducted by Rev. E. Quincy of our city.
who delivered one of his mastery, skillful dis
courses. Mr.. Quincy can bring the world down
on a funeral discourse. His sermon was full
of pathos and elocuence. The elder is Bible
student and gentleman of high culture.
The Rev. Eli Mudd offered up an eloquent
prayer. The reverend is young man of
marked ability.
The Rev. Mr.. Billwood of Maryland made
telling closing address; he will be counted in.
Mrs. Balaam as a vocalist had no parallel Her
voice was like that of an angel-soft and clear
and pathetic. Her music proceeded from her
| heart and reached the hearts of the hearers
She was called upon to sing at hundreds of fu-
nerals. She had sung great many times at
Spoon Lake church. In short, she was well
known singer. Mrs. Balaam will be missed at
| the bedsides of the sick. Her hand was al
ways open to relieve the wants of the poor
and afflicted. She would go far and near
to relieve the wants of the suffering. She
always paid into the church. She will be
missed at the class meeting and the Sunday
school. Fer graceful form will not be seen on
the streets any more. but in heaven. She was
q complete model of perfection and beauty.
But to all the world who will most miss her
the judge and Elite, her daughter, wife of Mr..
Burlingame. The Judge will not when he
comes home at q late hour find awaiting his
coming with q cup of hot coffee on the stove
and smiling face, with cheering words, but
the opposite-a dark house, no words of cheer
nor angels smiles to enliven the half dead
manhood. But what grief will come over the
bereaved husband when he finds dark house,
and that the mistress is lying among the tombs,
her eyes closed in death! Judge, you will see
dark days and gloomy shades, but there is one
cheering side to this-she is happy; she is
among the good of all ages. God bless her
ashes.
The funeral was largely attended; people
present from eight towns. Music by Minkinse's
band. Minkinse is one of the best musicians
in the country. Cold Storage of West Burlaps
was the undertaken. His part was well acted.
Quite large crowd followed the corpse to
Rush Center cemetery, where there was quite
crowd assembled awaiting the coming.
Among the crowd was Rev. Mr.. Pangborn,
Drs. Shrub, Snort and Murdoch, E. Lalow and
lady. and quite q number Of prominent people
Of the city were present. Rev. Pangborn pro-
+ q