The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1893-04-25

Il YR \\N
A Chance, but Don't Shoot--Where Is
Governor Carr7--The Office
Seekers--Tarif Reform.
B.-"Hellol Mr.. Editor"
R.-"An right Uncle Zeke, the phone
is in shooting order"
B.-"Hellol there, I don't want any
shootin' in this thing. If the phone
has got ter shootin' you may count me
out ov the game"
R.-''Oh! there is no danger. l
simply mean that is ready for use. In
other words it has "a chance" but will
not shoot. Our phone reminds us Of a
certain political party that has been
very prominent in this country. When
it gets "a chance" in simply refuses to
shoot when it gets loaded"
BIN so glad. I got enough Ov
the shootin' business at Seven Pines an
Ground Richmond. Say l wanter know
how Kurnel Bill Robbins, ov Statesville
is comm on erbout hiz offs. Betsy
says she heard that Kurnel Robbins
told President Cleveland that the Ali
ance folks hated him worse than they
did any man in North Carolina, an if
he didn't git an offs they might do
him personal injury"
R.-"Perhaps he did tell something
like that. Major Robbins wants office
so bad that he is not responsible for
what he will tell the President"
B.-"I Wanter to talk to Governor
| Carr an find out if he is still on the
track yet. I wanter know if he was
opposed to what the legislature done
against the Alliance charter. Sum ov
thu neighbors low that he wuz an sum
low that he wasn't. Sum say he has
jined the ~plutocrats an others say he
hasn't. We wanter know where he
stands. Wont you hitch the phone ter
the Governor an tell him that Bilkine
wants ter talk ter him an his Royal
Highnes5, Col. Sam Telfair?"
R-"Sorry I can't do it. Governor
Carr has been in Richmond, Chicago
and Washington recently, and Col.
Telfair is running the State Govern
ment on his bicycle. He is appointing
n~otaries public and Major Roberts is
endorsing everything"
B.-"Say, tell the Governor he had
better stay at home more fer there is
goin' ter be a big riot among thenotary
publics sum Ov these daysau' the whole
State will be drowned in blood. He
had better stay at home an look after
them, fer they are blood thirsty crowd
ov men. Betsy says the offs seekers
are goin' ter rebel against the govern
ment fer not appointin' all ov them.
There is over 200, 600 offs hunters in
the State an all but erbout so are goin'
ter get left, an she thinks all the others
will become gurillas or or outlaws or
sumpthin' terrible. Say, tell me whut
IL the outlook fer tariff reform"
R.-"The outlook is very good in
deed. The people are ready for it and
are going TO have it. There is nothing
in the way but the present administra-
ton. 1t was elected for spods and is
under obligations to the manufacturers
to such an extent that there can be no
reform of the tariff. The Southern
Democrats in Congress will vote for
some kind of a sickly tariff bill that
doesn't amount to anything, but the
Northern Democrats will vote against
it. This will again stir up sectional
feeling and sectionalism will be a
prominent feature Of the campaign in
go. Everybody will blame everybody
else for being being in the way. Just
before the election the Democrats will
abuse Cleveland and with a new man
for Presidential candidate, will cry
give us another chance" ''our foot
slipped this time" Give us another
chance" and we will wipe the force
bill off the face of the earth" Yes,
the outlook is splendid for tariff reform,
but not until reformers are elected
to Office"
B.-''If they do that Betsy will have
to be put in a steel cage, fer she will
be dangerous. But won't some ov
these fellers whuts bin votin' fer tariff
reform an expectin' it look sad.
Goodbye"
ISSUES FOR THE FUTURE.
We fully agree with the Southern
n