Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1893-02-05

patty from the neighbors. My friend
rather wished he had gotten the chill
dren q steam-piano or buzz-saw, and
tho next day when Billy q suppose !
can be familiar) again escaped he wasn't
altogether sorry. But colored citizen
soon appeared with the fugitive, and be
was again consigned to the back yard.
Papa knew that he was disappointed this
time, but the little ones we're as pleased
as ever. But alas, their poor hearts
were almost broken a few days after
wards. when Mr.. Goat again disappeared,
and with him few choice cabbage
which we're intended for the family
dinner. Did he turn up again !!
o, yesl he came back OF his
own volition the next time. and that
night his programme Of popular. music
on the a,hbank reused all the sleepers
in his immediate section. Time flew Oh,
and the loving father felt his hair
steadily turning gray, but the goat lived
and prospered. He would disappear
and reappear. In fact, he was like
bad penny, for there was no getting rld
of him. One night, when in particu-
larly amiable humor, Willie thought
himself the leading tenor In an
opera troupe, and he responded TO
imagined cncores until papa, who
was sIumbering-rather had SUM
bered-became simply wild. de
arose with look OF desperation on his
face. tossed himself into his bath robe
and sauntered forth to do murder to tna'
goat. With five ponderous KICKS ne
sent the miscreant scooting out the back
gate. And then silerce reigned supreme
and kept on refining until just after Day
break. when the dco--Dell rang violently
and the servant on answering found a
whole bevy OF boys who eagerly asked
10 see Mr.. - on important business.
Papa got up again, went down and there,
before his ewes, was--that goat. Inc
bows had brought him back, but the OLD
horse pistol did Its work.
-
A few days ago I saw Reginald bood-
lum in a cafe. There was look OF sad
ness on his face. His handsome brown
ewes had lost their lustre. and the slen-
der hand that held his cigarette trem-
bled as though he had reached his al
Iotted three-score and ten. An empty
champagne glass told the tale. =,
"Reeie," said. "what ails You, old
boy? Brace up-be man.
"a man." he repeated wistfully, as II
he had sunk into the slough OF degrada-
tion-"never, never, my day Is past
my star is sunk"
"Girls ?" 1 asked.
"No," he replied.
"Bet on John l.. Sullivan ?
"No: Corbett was my man.
"Then tell me what it is, L said.
His story WAS pathetic one. Three
wears ago." he began. when | LETT col
iece with the Master OF Arts degree, 1t
seemed that all the world would smile on
me. was bright and, pardon me If l
saw. handsome. | was worth hundred
thousand, and now-now am d so;iai
failure"
"a social failure l exclaimed.
Eyes" he said.
Haven't caught on to the waltz
step? / queried. -,
mo, | could lead a german blind
folded, he replied.
"WeI. what is it?" / asked.
ats my name." he sobbed.
"Your name," repeated, "Why the
Boodlums have never yet besmirched
their ilustrious escutcheon. Thelrfami-
" is one of the finest in the State, and
their name is the very emblem OF Gull
ture and refinement. "
"Alas | know that" said Reggie,
with some of his old-time pride return.
ing, "but you misunderstood me. L
lack q n,iddLe name. 1t is easier for a
camel to enter the eye Of needle than
for a man without middle name to get
his entree into society.
There's Smith, the shoemaker's
son." said Reggie. "When | knew him
he was plain Jack Smith, but since he
inherited that fortune l recognize my
old friend as j. Higgorison Smythe.
He is bowling social success.
land then there's Egg Falconer,
whose father drove my uncle's mules.
He came in for fortune, too, and to-
day he's known in the world of fashion
as Eggleston Granville Falconerc.
And so my friend went on, and L
pitied him in my heart, but knowing he
was right l could only say:
brace up, old boy don't take to
drink
Mr.. Irving s. Everybody knows him)
used TO STAY at commission house in
his early days, and as he had a great
head for finances he WAS wont to wonder
how he conld utilize the waste grain that
accumulated in the store, One day 1t
occurred to him that it would be first
rate idea to buy a cheap horse at an auc-
ton sale, fatten the beast up Oh the re-
fuse. and then dispose of it at an ad-
yanced figure. With this scheme In
view he attended q sale and select
ed a magnificent steed that com
manded the princely sum OF $500.
IT'S true the spirited charger was
a sort of translucent fellow with rather
bIase air, but Irving thought there was
room for improvement in him and
there was, too-so he was full of bright
hopes when he had his Pegasus led
home. Irving forthwith commenced
doctoring his nag. but medicine did him
no good. He would sit up at nights
with the animal and nursed him with all
tho loving care of mother. But the
old horse pinned with "green-and-yel-
low melancholy" and grew thinner and
thinner. The choicest menulstic selec-
tons failed to tempt his appetite.
Once some one told the energetic
possessor of the decrepid charger that
If he was carefully curried his health
Would greatly improve, SO Irving set to
work in this line. He accomplished
nothing, and at last. in sheer despera-
ton, he determined to send the de-
clining Bucephelus back to the horse
sale and palm him off on some unsus-
pecting victim. The steed was once
more placed in the hands of the auc-
tioneer, and some one had actually bid
a dollar on him when the darling OF
Irying's heart heaved faint sigh, cast his
mellow eyes heavenward, and departed
this life. And thus Irving, in the hey
day of his youth, saw all "his fondest
hopes decay" and what was worse,
- Il or,a,ka1 him Tho