The Newberry herald and news. (Newberry, S.C.) 1884-1903, 1893-05-31
The Billville Divide.

The BHlville Divide.
The great divide at Billyille-did you
ever hear o. that?
If you didn't, take seat thar, on the
pine box-hang yer hat
On the hitchin' post. Terbackef? Here's
brand you haven't tried;
An while you're chawin' on it, I'll 60
on with the divide.
It's the funniest thing, I reckon, that
fellow ever heard,
An you're goin' to kinder doubt it an
look dubious, I'm afeared;
But it's true as the collection, 'an it's
jes' as broad as wide,
An now Pm going to tell it-so here
goes fer the divide.
You see, we've got a town here! That
is, we kinder had,
Fore the lawyers hung their shingles
an jes' drove the people mad.
But amt wranglin' with 'em; it's
the story I'm givin',
Fer town can live with lawyers, but
the lawyers-does the livin'!
Fust of, we had a Baptis' church-it
kinder got in debt,
An, the sheriff bout decided that it's
six miles in it yet!
They got to fightin' bout the lot-each
feller had bis views;
Then, the lawyers got the pulpit. then
the shingles an the pews.
An next we built a schoolhouse, an
had ter run a bill;
Then, the board o. education, they got
mad enough ter kill,
AM went ter law about it-can't tell
the why er how, q
But the lawyers got the schoolhouse,
an they're runnin' ofsisnoW!
An next, there come the town hall
that's it jes' 'crost the way;
The council had ter make a bond, am
then they couldn't pay;
An so, they went ter lawn fer the
cash they couldn't raise,
AM the lawyers got the town hall, and
the mayors turned out ter Craze.
AM next-here comes the grocery store
the only one in town.
The grocery man was honest, am he
marked his prices down
An smashed before he knowed it, fer
his bills was faalin' due,
An the lawyers-well, they're kinder
in the grocery business, too!
AM next we got a railroad, with sign
that made show:
Twas "Look out for the engine when
you hear the whistle blowr;
We was proud oft as preachin'-puta
flag up at the tanks,
Fer our train was second cousin ter the
flying Nancy Hanks"
But stockholders got ter grumblin', on
one drizzly, mizzly night
The engine struck a feller an jes'
knocked him out O sight.
AM then here come a lawsuit; the
stock-it took fall,
AM the lawyers was receivin', an re-
ceived the road an all!
Now,yeu see, they got the meetin'house,
the schoolhouse too, an then
The town hall when squealin' like
shoat into their pen;
An then, the village grocery store, an
last Of all, the road
AM the brass bands blowin' fer 'em,
jes' the best it ever blowed!
So now, when they'd jes' gobbled all,
die they git in ter fight,
An go to law, an fuss an jaw, an cuss
from left ter right?
Not much! Why, brethrin, lawyers is
the lovin'est of folks
They're full O life an laughter; make
you split your sides with jokes.
Well, the lawyers give dinner, an
they jes' invited down
What little Of the town was left ter
represent the town;
An when they'd all got seated, feller
on one side
Riz up an said: "We're here tonight
ter have the great divide"
Then they shared the shinin' proceeds
of the meetin' house, the hall,
The grocery store, the schoolhouse, an
the railroad, tanks an all;
An when they'd done the sharin', an
twas gittin' time to go,
They sung "Old Hundred" "an' praised
God from whom all blessin's flow!
Now, this here is the story, an the
moral I'm a-givin'
Is, town kin live with lawyers, but
the lawyers does the livin'.
We uster have town that was je7' the
country's pride,
But now, its known here ter people as
'The Billyille Big Divide"
F. L. S.