The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1893-03-04
punoENr PARAGRAPHS.


WHATS that noise up-stai-sT'
"Nellie is singing to kill time till her
beau comes "Nell. time seems TO die
hard. doesn't it?'-N. Y. Press.
-"No matter what subject you talk
on, my friend BillSins has the matter at
his fingers ends" us that SOP "Yes
hes deaf aud dumb."-Tit-Bits
-"Ignernt?" said old Mr.. Jason, speak
ing of a neighbour. ivy, that man
doesn't know as much as a-as a-as
astronomer. "-Indianapolis Journal.
-He-'But don't you think it wrong
to have too many strings to your bow"
She-Ah, yes! But have my beaux on
a string. you seel"-Haivard Lampoon.
DO they ring bell to awaken you
at your boarding house?' mo, we get
up when we hear the cook pounding
the beefsteak IN. Y. Press
Young Staylate-'1 should very
much like to meet your father some
day." Amy-''Well. if you will stay
about an hour longer he will be coming
down to breakfast. "-Harper's Bazaar.
Little Dot-''O, mamma, there's a
sign Puppies for Sale Won't you buy
me onc?' Mamma-''Wait till you are
little older. dear" Little Dot-"But
then they'll be dogs. It'd
-She-'.So a sinecure is position in
which person gets the salary another
earns?r Hc-"Precisely, my love-" She
-"That's the kind of job want" He
-"You have it. dearest. Detroit
Tribune.
Not All Alike.-First Boy-"Do all
office-holders get big salaries?' Second
Boy-"No. Seine hold positions OF
honor" Don't they get anything?"
"Only what they steal"-Good News
The Reverse of Romance
| lisher-'Is your novel realistic?" Au-
thor-eIt is. The hero and the heroine
get married in the first chapter and are
unhappy ever afterward. IN. Y.Wor9d.
-Travers-..This overcoat seems pref
ty tight around the chest" Tailor
"When you have taken the money out
of your pocketbook to pay for it, sir. it
| will fit all right"-Clothier and Fur
nisher.
Mrs. Miggs' children look SC
neglected, poor things; is she away?
mo, she is spending her time writing
those beautiful articles, How to Make
Home Attractive for the Children. -
Inter Ocean.
Nothing New.-Mr. West-"Gold &
Stone are exhibiting the American hog
in gold and precious stones" Mrs.
West-''Thats nothing new to women
who travel on the Broadway cars
jewelers. Weekly.
-Master-"Of late you have BRUSHED
my clothes in q very superficial manner
Johann" MAN Servant-"Well, but
sir" Master-"Just look here;
found this six-pence still in my pocket
this morning. Buntes Allerlci
! -"You should have heard me sing
Let Me Dream last evening" said thu
young woman who vocalizes II did
replied the young man whose room j
Just over the parlor piano, "and It ex
pressed my sentiments exactly
Washington Star.
MIR. Einstein-"Vot does you do IL
der evenings, Mr.. Solomonsg" Mr.. Sol
omons-"I plays chess NIT my wife.
Mr.. Einstein-"Vy do you likes chess?
Mr.. Solomons-''O because it is SO lilx
beezness. First / takes a pawn, an
den my wife redeems it; anG den sh
takes pawn. and l thinks am in d
shop. Princeton Tiger
Why He Did 1.-THE girl was yer
rich and the young man was poor. bu
| honest. She liked him, but that wa
! all and he knew it. One night he ha
been little more tender than usua
I You are very rich," he venturet
"Yes," she replied, frankly. Il al
worth million dollars" 'And ! al
, poor" "Yes' "Will you marry me:
s'No." 81 thought you wouldn't
.Then why did you ask me?' 20, ju'
, to see how a man feels when he loses
million" and the girl smiled. -Detro
II