The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1893-11-01
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

Every man with bright son be-
lieves in heredity. .-Atchison Globe.
There are always some rare bargains
at the meat market. -Galveston News.
If You want to know a woman's
faults, ask her dearest female friend.
When the dealers put down the
prices on peaches the women put them
up.-Boston Globe.
What are you wearing glasses
for?" 'For my eyes, stupid Spose
I'm wearing them for corns?'
When the colleges open it will be
Drawn versus brain, and may the best
man win. Rochester Post-Express.
He wore wide hat and a sash,
And stared in way that was bold,
But the girls every one adored him.
For you see he was four years old.
Chicago Inter-Ocean.
Many girl makes a bad blunder in
not taking man at his word when he
SAYS. 81 am not worthy of your love.
Puck.
''The pleasantest way to take cod
liver oil, " says an old gourmsnd, sis
to fatten pigeons with it, and then eat
the pigeons"
'1 am told that Carson always heaps
Goals on his enemies heads. " "Well,
he is rich and can afford to do such
things. Truth.
Friend-"Well Tommy, now that
you've started to school, what do yeu
like best?" Tommy-"Recess. Chi
cago Inter-Ocean.
Hark. from the tombs a doleful sound
Comes TO u, one and all
II is maiden down the street,
Who sings, after the Ball
Detroit Free Press.
-''The last / saw of Gayboy he
said he was ont for time. l wonder
if be got it?" Jaggs-"Yes; the
Judge gave him ten days. Buffalo
Courier.
Everything American goes in
France. They even want American SER
wants there, and have not yet learned
that there is no such thing. Boston
Journal.
Mother-"C Children have you said
your prayers?" Tilly-"Yes, nam,
ma" you were very quick about
it. 81 prayed one-half and Daisy
the other "---Texas Siftings
The Debutante taside)--"How many
verses shall l sing?" The Professor
DO you want an encore?' The
Debutante-"Of course. The Pro-
fessor--"One. boston Budget.
She was airy
As a fairy
And no man she'd ever led
To think l guess,
OF heaviness.
Until shetook 10 baking bread
Buffalo Courier.
81 read IN account Of how girl fell
over forty feet without killing herself.
Good gracious How did she do
it?" Tried to get ont of a moving
street car with exactly twenty men in
it. Vogue.
Hostess-"'So you are going TO be
married. Ethel?' Girl lFriend-"Yes.
Il thought you said you intended to
remain single. II did hut I've been
taking lessons in the cooking school,
and | don't want to waste them. -
Chips.
Mrs Fangle--"Haye you secured o
lodger for your second floor vet, Mr..
Goslin?" Goslin ihorrifed) ~ haven't
been looking for q lodgcr, madam.
Mrs. Fangle- Why, I'm certain my
husband told me you had rooms TO let
in your upper story. '--Waif.
Her Friend--"I thought you were
going to marry a man with title or
forever remain single" Mrs. Nuwodde
He has title, ] beg leave to in
form you "What Is it, pray?'
''Ducksy darling l gave 1t TO him
myself. indianapolis journal.
you quite devoted yourself TO that
frightmllooking Van Stick on the
train the other day, Edith; what on
earth made you do thatg well, II
was absolutely necessary To pay some
attention 10 him. You don't sup
pose | wanted people TO think he was
my husband Brooklyn Life.
For two hours the fashionable lady
kept the draper exhibiting his goods,
aud at the end of that period she
sweetly asked: care you quite sure
you Lave shown me everything YOU
haveg' "No. msdgm, said the
draper, with On iusinuatiuc smile. Il
have yet an old account ia my ledger
which / shall very gladly show you.
lid Bits.
A misguided indi,idual came up 60
young lady the othe- day and con-
graduated her Upoa Ecr Engagement.
1t may be rational TO congratulate
girl that il is no worse OF Que OF uu-
certain years on not missing her last
trick. but neither would bee advisable.
The best that an engaged glrl's frieuds
can do is 10 extend To ber their best
wishes and try % withhold the sigh
The man is the one to be congratulated
for he plunge, into matrimony with
both oyes open, and It is his own fault
if he does Lot hnd the bliss FOR which
he si5hs BROOKLYN Llfe.