Oxford Democrat. [volume] (Paris, Me.) 1833-1933, 1893-11-07
ShafpshOOtets, ].
First Ciass, !.
second Class, -.
Thiri Class, n.
Total membeTship, az
FULLER TAKES THE PLATFORM.

rs may DC discovered aIter cartIui
study of the letter below, Fuller Of the
Rockland Tribune has taken upon HIM
self the task Of discharging the debts OF
the churches Of the stste-and merely
incidentally putting few stray coppers
In his own pocket. Fuller has an un-
questioned reputation as the Mark
Twain Of the Maine press. III his lee
ture doesn't interest and Instruct peO-
pie, and at the same time make them
laugh, Il will be because he has gone
back on his record. The lecture will
certainly provoke mlrth, for he himself
says Sod. Democrat.
Editor Democrdt:
Fearing that you may not hear OF II
la any other way, hasten to inform
you that am at length u candidate for
the lecture platform.
One beautiful October day was sit
ting Mt NV newspaper desk, writing up
some kind words for our town merchants
under the guise of local news, when a
noble looking gentleman came In and
stood watching me for few moments
In silence. Then he said:
"Sir. have been observing your
thoughtful brow and other personal
characteristics for some time, and let
me suggest that you are an Individual
" no L. needed In the bOundless west. In
the west they require men like you Ia
the banking business, and there Is a
fortune within yOnr grasp IL you eau
only lind time to sell out this printing
office and grasp It."
Shortly afterwards | threw up my
commission rs Justice Of the Peace aud
Quorum, and adjourned to the Occident.
At first there was a report that l was
accommodating the entire wealth OF the
west, followed shortly afterwards BY
another report, louder than the first and
mole hollow In Its character. A few
nights later, under friendly cover OF
darkness, I walked slowly Into town,
carrying In my hand valise filed with
a large assortment Of Experience, and
the next morning ! resumed business nj
the old stand.
have now got up lecture which
call, "Banking In Kansas; How | found
IL, and How Ii Left Me-" II Is lecture
that no thoughtful man or woman Can
afford to 20 on much longer without
hearing. IL contains great deal OF
Information, with here aud there some
bon mots that have occurred to me as |
was getting IL up. I have said over
one or two OF these bon mots to my
father and he has laughed real hard. liz
said, after wlplng his eyes, that was .
comlcal fellow. Nv father can trace his
descent from the Puritans who came
over I'm the Mayfiower, aud he ought &C
know what joke Is II anybody does
Ny wife, who has heard me practlclng
on Il, aud seen me trying some OF the
gestures In front Of glass-a looking
glass-says Il is nice, and II people d0n'l
come to hear this lecture and then 70
away aud laugh at IL, that's all she
wants to know about them.
People all over the state ought to heal
me think. BY means Of this lecture
churches and all kinds Of folks can b
got out Of debt. All 1t needs Is to en-
gage me for certain date, sell large
number Of tickets at q fixed price, and
walt with impatience for the time tC
wear away. On the appointed evening
I will appear, and after talking to the
people for while In my way, they will
70 to their homes gladly, and the man
agement will pocket what IL left.
This Is why have at length decided
to Yield to the popular clam0r, nc 90
much per clsmor, aud appear In swal.
low-appendaged coat with broad ex'
panse Of lroned shlrt-front dazzling the
eyes Of the people In front Of me.
w. ID. FULLER, JR.