Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1893-02-09
"UNC' P'TROOSHO."

snoT AIN 70 neDah year dat
'Marse Gawge CUB me dat name.
down in Faginny, endu'in wah time.
Marse Gawge greet man ter glib we all
moo names. had mon 1eben, guess,
on'y Ptroosho de on'y one sides Petah
dat stick ter me. Wen Miss Alice CUB
me suit er Marse Gawge's cloes, wild red
necktie an plug hat, Marse Gawge he
laff an say he gotter call me Boobrum-
mi, and SO he do fo' long time ebry day
dress up. Den, one time wen gwine
to mill, de ol hosses deY git scarf an run
plumb ter mill an back ergin; an after
dat, eb'ry time Marse Gawge see me wild
de bay team, he hollah, 'Hullo, Gilpingr
"Nodah time, wen l bin fussin aroun
in de garTit, foun er oil muff, wha' ol
miss done frow erway, an ak Miss Alice
kin I hab IN, case 1t jes' de ing wen /
halter go set b. Pomp, de dribah, on col
days wen Marse Gawge an Miss Alice
go dribin. Miss Alice she say kin, 50
mex col day, w'ep dey halter go ter
Marse Willie's, I war de muff. N
Marse Gawge, he seen m, an say: HUI
10, Rushinbow! Wen you come FIN
FranceP
"But wy lie call me 'P'trooshoY l
dunno, 'zackly, but Marse Gawge do.
He kim ter me one day, an say, 'Petah,
whuffer yo' don git merried erginF
Marse Gawge allus sayin tings right
plumb out ter we all, jes' lax dat.
can l say: 'Marse Gawge, ain
speakin no names, but does yo' mem
bah er suttin pusson dat am now gone
erway FIN disher vale of teahs, an
whatter misable tempah dat pusson had?
An do yo' 'membah dat wen dat suttin
pusson was hbin, folkses dat libed wild
her gotter stan roun? No, sab, doesn't
caffer any mo-, tank yo, Marse Gawge
Sides, Tze ergettin too OF fo' sich non
sensical tings.'
"Marse Gawge he laff. WY Petah,
he say, 'yo' is on'y bout fifty. Yo'
young man yit. Now, me n Miss Alice
bin tinkin dat 'twould be nice ting eff
Clrindy n you'all d git married.
'Twould sorter mex it mo- c'nveeniunt,
an all dat
II dunno whatter say ter dat Dat
Clrindy was lady lookin an right smaht,
but she got jes' sich a tempah as l done
had 'speriunce wild. So I look It Marse
Gawge an say: NH! Golly, chile, dat
niggah wuss'n de odah one I done men,
shun. How yo' spose l kin stan dat?'
"Marse Gawge he stop n tink fer vile.
Den he say: 'Petah, fze feared yo' done
let yerse'f he hainpeck'. Lemme tell
yo', Petah, dat de only way ter be boss
am ter 'sert yo'se'f an don let no woman
mex yer stan roun LAX Aunt Debby
done. Dey was er man oncet whar name
was P'troosho, an he right smaht man.
Well, dey merry him ter gal wha' got
mo- tempah n er settin hen. My, she
war tur'ble! So P'troosho, wen he git
all hitch, gin ter train dat oman.
"'Ef she git mad he git mad, too, r
tend dat he is, an he jes' raise de ol Nick
wuss'n her. Eff she say it col day, he
say she lie, dat de day am nis'ably wahm.
Of he dom lax he dinner he TEX n frow
it on de floh an bre'k de dishes. He hol-
lah at dat oman an boss 'er roun an
bullyrag twell dat oman don know 'er
name. By M by she git so dat wen
P'troosho tell 'er in broad daylight dat
de sun am de moon she b'liebe i'm, an
willin ter sw'ar ter it. IF he call 'Kater
she mos bre'k 'er naik comm ter see
whuffer he call.
"'Now, Petah, dat's de way ter do ef
er fool oman ac' LAX dat. In dat way
yo' kin bre'k 'em OBJ deir tricks in bout
two days
~ fought erwhile an mex up my min
dat war greet scheme, SO say ter Marse
Gawge, 'Marse Gawge, eff yo' n Miss
Alice sesso, do dat an see how yo' plan
wuk.'
$50 wen Chrismus kim, me n Cl'rin-
dy stan up in de pollah OBJ de big house,
an de w'ite pashon merry us, same lax
he done Marse Willie an Miss Blanche,
an after dat we all hab big time in de
hall twell mos mawnin."
II had er house back b. de cookhouse,
whar me N Debby done lib fer mon
twenty year, an me n Cl'rindy we mobed
in dar. Marse Gawge done CUB us new
cheers an table an stobe, an Miss Alice
she let us hab new cyarpet, wha' she
dom want in up staihs hall no mo- SO we
all was fixed up right smaht.
"Clrindy war jes' sweets p'simmons
fo' mon er week. Den one day she git
outer de bald wrong way, an wen look
It her / know dat omen Is mad. / din
lax dat, case I hab my min all mex ur
dat wen she 'gind at mad b'sniss she got
ter hab less'n, an I dom lax ter CUB il
ter her. But I dom say muffin, on'y mex
up my min ter let 'er go twell she git
sassy, den shek er off'n dat high hoss
Gwen we waitin on table at dinnah,
Marse Gawge he kin see dat Cl'rindy am
hot, an he wink at me, LAX dis. After
dinner, wen he cotch me erlone, he say,
Well, P'troosho, is yo' git de shoe
tanned? Den he laff.
II say, What shoe does yo' mean, sahi
I don't know muffin bout no Shoe
"Den Marse Gawge laff some mo-, an
say, I dim say no shoe, Petah. mean,
is yo' had ter gin Cl'rindy's less'ns yit? ]
kin see she mad wild something
81 tell i'm ain staht trainin yit, but
it look lax hah ter right quick.
'Petah,' Marse Gawge say reel sol
lum, don vase no time in disher 'ffaih.
De moment de trubble stahts in yo
staht in too.' An say I will But dey
aim no row dat day.
Mex day war Sund'y, an ! dim natter
git up, p,eahly, SO lay cen de bald twell
mos haf pas s. Den I git up an gin tel
tog out Cprindy was settin lookin outer
de doah, lookin mad. Pret' soon say,
sCrrindy, whar NAH bes' Sunday shuht
wild rufies on? Cl'rindy ans back, reel
shoht, she aim see no sich shuht.
sYo' ain'r I say. Oman, dim say