The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1893-02-01
corn's Stomach Bitters. which cheers In

COru otOLudCH Buffers, winch cheers In
ebriates and leads to uxorcide
Iowa has shown that there are many
kinds of drinks unknown to the wide
open states. heard man say not long
ago that the Barleycorn drunk was the
worst known on earth and defied all BIZ
carbonate of gold treatment, for no ono
knows what antidote to use against a
| patent medicine.
| These bitters, and there are many
others like them sold by tho great gross
in Iowa. if used i'll large quantities pro-
duce grateful feeling at first and are
then followed by an epidemic of crime.
The interior of tho human stomach
after Il Barleycorn debauch is said to lool,
like the burning of the great firecracker
| factory on Staten Island Patent stomach
bitters in Iowa arc working n great curse.
| They are working it in blue crewels ON n
mourning background
Once i'll Iowa Il beautiful and wealthy
| lady with starry eyes. reminding mo of
Psyche as l saw her onco ut our house
when boy. and with IL coaxing dimple
III her check, held to my lips sparkling
| glass of crystal III which the Barleycorn
Bitters bubbled and sang,
Take one with me-" she said, resting
her shapely little hand on my coat sleeve
as if it were IL little tame, tired white
rat. Take one with me. Twill cheer
you up and possibly loosen up an old
thought"
No" said. looking down into her
soft brown eyes as far as | thought |
ought to. II cannot take it. l took one
once. and it swallowed up all my salary
that month to pay for the people
MANNED. Even now tho pictures in the
advertisements remind me of the things
l saw while | was cheered up by this
beverage. do not mind drinking the
juice out of u lanyard, because | am
young and my digestion is good. but do
not ask me to take an Iowa tonic"
Common wooden rolling pins are now
greatly sought after by those who wish
to give cheer to the long winter evenings.
One of the handles may be unscrewed, it
is said. and the odor of tho nectar of the
blue grass country may be detected.
If the genius used in Maine and Kansas
and Iowa alone for tho purpose of evad-
ing the prohibitory laws could have been
turned in the direction of useful science
and invention. we could have had in 1893
at least 10000 people per day visiting
the Worlds fair on wings, and thus COM
ing in force. also on Sundays.
The first copy Of The Weeping Willow,
q paper used as the vehicle for carving
abroad tho postmortem poetry which
may not be available to other publ
cations, has just been received. 1t is
lying dark and listless Oh our table. like n
sirloin steak on the bruised and beaten
Et.ntx Of ,,,l,,1 A.~l Il
he'd. 1t is as depressing sheet as one
would crawl into at the Cockroach House.
where we hired two warm rooms and
slept in our overcoats and arctics.
1t runs mostly to poisons. treating of
accidental Deaths though sometimes
lung difficulties and Bright's disease are
also treated in verse.
| The editor asks for n favorable notice
will do the best can. AS general
rule am not in favor of using the bill
boards or the press for the bitter display
of grief. Grief and public scrutiny do
not so well together. but some of these
poems are SO weird and full of things
that one is not looking for that we almost
forget tho general invitation to close the
store and participate in IA private wall.
give one little poem here to show the
general scope of the work. 1t goes to
show that with the death of Browning
we have yet left with us right here in
America tho material of which corduroy
| verse is made:
WHEN PETITE DIED.
| When Petite taken ILL
| And disease was speedily
Taking his life,
How snd il made us feel.
| Lingering near his bedside
Administering things In him
Before he died!
| We Shall not forget soon how
| Petite called US TO his side
| To SAY what he was going to
Before he died
Nor how his face lit up
On cyether side.
He longed for promise from
| His Maynard relatives
| On his wfe's side
That they would meet him,
| And then saw how mentally he had
failed
Before lie died.
- = ~M
x:,zzzN-,)W
gaSy mn ~ III.
~ Z M/l%@dM/nIaSNZ1@M