The Globe-republican. [volume] (Dodge City, Kan.) 1889-1910, 1893-02-10
Tea-Table Talk.

Tea-Table Talk.
An obtuse angle-fshing for COM
pliments.-Union County Standard.
A COMET crushed to earth will not
rise again.-New Orleans Picayune.
AN ear of corn is supposed to be at
tentive to the corn's-talk.-BostO
Courier.
The crockery trust is broken. 1t
ran up against the servant girls
trust.-Texas Siftings.
MAMMA" said Johnny, IF I swal-
lowed thermometer would die by
degrees?"- Boston Post.
TALK about your transformations!
We have seen square man turn
round.-YOnkerS Gazette.
MANY a man who will fight if you
kick his dog, lets his wife carry in
all the WOODLANDS Horn.
RECIPE for domestic broil: First
catch the hair on your husbands
cOat-cOllar.-BOstOn Gazette.
You never could persuade horse
car driver that women know enough
to vote.-Somerville Journal.
The race Cue,t on a present per-
tains not so much to immigration as
to the America cup.-Philadelphia
Record.
AS THERE are no railroads in the
other world, Mr.. Gould has probably
seized the toboggan slide.-St. Louis
Post Dispatch.
The winter girl who is described
as dressed to kill would doubtless be
classified as a form of slay-belle.
Washington Star.
No CHARGE to florists for this ad-
vice: If you would have your plants
start early put them in spring beds.
Lowell Courier.
IT is now thought that what was
regarded a few days ago as Biela's
comet was only the price of COAL
Binghamton Leader.
BOOSTERS are good deal like men.
A rooster never gives notice of finding
a worm until after he has swallowed
it.-Atchison Globe.
IF cats could only hold their back
fence carnivals in the daytime they
wouldn't mew-till-late nights so.-
Rochester Democrat.
A MAN is satisfied to make repu-
tation for himself; but woman, bless
her. wants to make one for everybody
in the Observation-Disclosures Ga
zette.
| OFFICER KRAUTMEIER guess
peter as you 90 to vail. Befuddled
Stranger-Not mush I'll 60 to Yale.
Pm a Harvard man.-Indianapolis
Journal.
| ADORER-sWhen we are married,
darling, we shall be one." Miss
1bsen-"I'm aware Of that, Edward;
but the question is, which one?"-
Funny Folks.
aYoU said you would die for me,
but you get discouraged the first time
papa kicks you down stairs" q
never agreed to die for him. DE
troit Tribune.
Il WISH you would not take adj
vantage of the relationship seemingly
implied in your name to be SC
familiar" said the hen to the Ratchet
Washington Star.
TEACHER - James, what is the
shortest day of the year? James
(from experience) - The day your
father promises to give you lickin
afore you 60 tobed.-Puck.
ETHEL (excitedly)-"He has known
J me only two days and put his arm
around me-" Eva-"You mean.
suppose, that he knew you two days
and only put his arm around you. -
Life.
TAX AssEssoR-"Do you swear that
you own nothing but the clothes you
are wearing?" Charlie Lakeland
well, I also own a porous plaster
but I am wearing that, too. Seattle
Soundings.
CREDrToR-aI called to see if yor
could pay that little bill to-day.
Debtor-"Come, now, this IS a little
too much. You press me about that
little bill just as though Iwere poo
man. Boston Transcript.
Submissive indulge in domestic
drama every night at our house
Parkes-Indeed! Who takes part:
Sturgis-My 3-months-old daughter i!
leading lady, and I do walking gen
tleman part.-New York Herald.
LITTLE DICK--"I wish I had ;
pair of skates" Father-~Why dom
you pray for tlrem?" Little Dick
well, skates wouldn't be any goo(
without ice. I'll tell you how vel
fix it. You get the skates and III
pray for the ice. Good News.
"WHAr a beautiful woman Mis-
Barclay is. By Jove, she is Venus,
said Hicks "Bosh!" returned Nav
; son. Look at her arms: they're s.
thin you can't see 'em. That's al
right; she's a Venus Of Milo" ex
planned Hicks.-Harper's Bazaar.
JAcK-"Did you lose anything OF
the game, Maud?" Maud-"No; yol
see, Jack Holworthy promised me tel