Morning journal and courier., 1893-02-15
SPRINGS.

Jsgson says it's always FpringtIne with
 Waterbury watch.-Elmirs GsEstfe. You realize that silence Is golden when
 you come to settle for care of Mumm.-- Bipghsmton Leader.
 One of the times when Q man bfgins to | cry and sigh that all men are not honest is
 when he gets the wrong hat--Ram's Ho-n-
 What do you consider the height of
 mesnnessT "TO sepd 6 comic valsntine with a psnny s.amp."-Piusburg Dis
 patch.
 Mabel-I wouldn't marry the best man | in the world. JRquss-AlAt' Yon have made me the unhkppiest of nea.-Boston Courier.
 You can always find ont how much 6
 man is worth when he dies by looking At
 his will. Ii is dead give-swsy. y.-Roches- ter Democrat.
 The man who spoke Of "the dangers of
 our coasts" had been standing on s hillside | when the boy and sled came Along.-Cleve- land Plain Dealer.
 Barnes Having aside lstier(-I'd like f' l git this ere feller fer hired man Mrs.
 Bsrnes-Why, Joshg BaTnes-'Csuse he signs himself Your obt dient seryAnt"- Puck.
 "This Is a miss apprehension on my part. but it goes all the same. Y" ss the dry goods store detective remarked when he
 arrested the young woman for shopl!tIing.
 -Philsdelphis Record.
 "Well, my little man, I'm glad to hear you talk sbout your school ss you do. Why Is 1t you take SO much more interest noEs Little Msn-'Cause We don't have to go no
 more.-Chicsgo Inter Ocean.
 "To think that my Ethel should have
 spoken So impertinently to papa al dinner. | She never hears me talk in that way to
 him" Ethel (stoutly) - Well. but you | choosed him, and didn's-Ta-Blts. Reggy-I hear there is 10 be q dreadful | row in society. Cholly-Yes, Mics Chnlm-
 ondeley is about 10 sue Miss Hcnichesing- | ton for alternating the affections of her pet | pug doz.-Shoe and Leather Reporter.
 A New Plan.-Mrs Muaiu-whst do | you wantf Starved Most-l bet dis feliar dat could eat twelve O your birki:s in | twelve minaits, and We wants you fer
 referee.-Smith, Gray S Co s Monthly. | 'fBlifkins must be a very generous man.
 l heard him say last night tho. he would lend friend his last dollar " ''I know ii" was the reply. "But he's 80 rich ;ha: he | never gets down to thst."-Wasbipgto Star.
 fIunderstand young Briefsss is abort to marry the daughter of old Bonds, the mil- lionaire," ''Yes, so am told" "Will he give up the law businessf' Yes; hs will give up the law business and go into the son-in-law business" ."-Texas S!ftings- "Whst could you have been thinking of, | to engage yourself to three m,pi" Well, | mother told me my fsncse u lst be rich,
 intelligent, handsome, and of inc bsst
 moral character, and as I couldn't hope for | all that in one man, l had to take three" Brooklyn Life.
 She-As we are to be married in June, don't you think yoa ought to begin to economical He-Ob, I've begun already.
 That very thought occurred to mo this | evening as I was coming here. She-What | did you dol He-PAss=d tse randy store
 without stOpp!ng.-New York Weekly Clear ss Bell-Eminent German sing | ing professor (to fair Saxon beginner, les
 sons st sl0 per hourl-Erstens molto plan | issimo con amore, zst is, init gefnhi; damn | crescendo, damn forte till fortissiulo hin | aufsteigendI all st once diminuende R long | still-stsnd, and beinshe nodding finish You understsndi-HsTper's Bszar. Every season brings & new crop of cough