Lincoln County leader. [volume] (Toledo, Lincoln County, Or.) 1893-1987, 1893-09-07
The WHISPERS AND IHe MAN.
How the Hair on His Face Dominates III
Nearer's Character

Among the men l meet at inter
Yals on the road is very intelligent
fellow from Boston," said a drum
mer. He is about s., and with a
capacity for raising hair on his face
beyond that of any person l ever
met He has fun with it, too, and he
has his whiskers in different shape
every time l meet him. Now aud
then l don't know him, but he al
ways comes up smiling, and catch
on to the new man without much
difficulty.
Its queer about whiskers, said
he the last time l saw him. Don't
you know they change the character
of the MANI
didn't know it and said so.
They do, however, he continued,
whether you know it or not. Now,
have been hairy for years nearly,
and in that time l have been all sorts
OF meI For instance, when l wear
large, flowing side whiskers with n
mustache, l grow gradually as they
do, and become quite dignified and
self important. l can't help it, you
know. Its ''whiskers oblge," as we
say in French, and when l catch a
look at myself in glass as l walk
along / unconsciously swell out and
strut I'm bound to do it to match
those whiskers. Then, when cut off
the mustache and run the side whis-
kers alone, l never see that mouth
and chin back there but it makes me
feel pious, and l begin to assume the
demeanor of aminister of the gospel.
Can't help it, either, to save my life.
Sometimes l go smooth faced, and
my character oscillates between
priest and actor, according to the
one of the crowd Tn in. l even get
boyish sometimes and frisky when
see my smooth, round face.
"'Once, for the fun of it, l cut my
mustache la prizefghter, short and
stubby, and, do you know, before a
week was VeritaOle tough, with
my hat cooked over my eye and my
general manner provoking a slug
ging match at every turn. l was
anxious for a fight all the time and
only saved myself by shaving. When
| wear full, neatly trimmed beard,
| feel exactly like a banker or a sue
cessful professional man, and my
manners after little while fall into
that rut. look it, they tell me, and
| can't help but belt. If 1 wear a
mustache alone, long and silky,
feel like a gay Lothario, and want to
smile at and ogle every woman see,
| want to be one of the boys, too,
and whoop it up all along the line.
When add an imperial to the mus
tache, throw my shoulders back,
brace my muscles and assume mil
itary air. In one or two of my towns
| am known as colonel, for l have
alwaysworn my imperial while there.
"'If l run my beard down to
point in the French style, l feel quite
diplomatic, and can be as slick as the
politest of them. l feel my shoul-
ders shrug on the slightest provoca-
ton, and to all intents and purposes
| am q foreigner. If l part my
whiskers in the middle and brush
them out to either side, l am Ger
man nobleman or a British land
owner, according to my surround
ings. 1t gives me hale and hearty,
middle aged feeling that shows at
once in my manner. If the whiskers
are let grow very long, l feel like
patriarchal farmer and become quite
elderly and innocent in my deport-
ment. And so it goes through all
the phases.
~ fancy that the style of mans
whiskers is in consonance with the
mans character, and that as a man is
30 will his whiskers be. In my case
l have reversed the operation, but l |
feel as grow older and become more
settled that l shall adopt one style of !
whiskers and keep to that Even |
now l am getting around to it and |
have been wearing this close cut full |
beard for almost six months, and |
| don't feel like changing it. '"-De.
troit Free Press.