Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1893-05-15
JUST FOR FUN.
Horse sense GEMS to consist of tn,
ability to say ssNav.''


ability to say "Nay."
He-Do you think it will be a match?
Shelf ought to be. He's a regular
stick, and she's all the rest of it.
"BRAcE UP."-Is a tantalizing admonition
to those who at this season feel all tired out
weak, without appetite and discouraged. But
| the way in which Hoods Sarsapari1la builds
| up the tired frame and gives good appetite,
/ is really wonderful. So we say, "Take Hood S
and it will brace you up.'
For general family cathart1c we confident
| 1y recommend Hoods Pills.
"I can't see how Rev. Mr.. Long
wind manages to wade through his
| sermons" ooh, they are not Deep
Many a fellow who is conspicuous
| for his signs before he is married turns
| out to be a very small man afterward.
GA little change of heir" remark ed
| the old man as he altered his will cut
| ting off his nephew in favor of his
| typewriter.
Salvation Oil is repeating its cures of neu-
ralgia, rheumatism, headache, and toothache
every day until their name is legion Price 25.
was the remark of a young husband
when he partook of his wife's first
sponge Gale.
Overheard in the nursery-''Don't
lie on your back, Freddie; it will make
you dream" ''All right, mamma, I'll
lie on my edge"
"I am really going to observe Fast
Day in an appropriate manner this
year" "How?" "By taking out on the
road my speediest trotter."
Chicago man, as he stood before
Washington monuments "That's
pretty good elevator shaft. When
are yon going to put up the rest of
the building?"
Travers This overcoat feels pretty
tight around the chest Tailor-When
you have taken the money out Of your
pocketbook to pay for it, sir, it will
fit all right.
The enormous sale of DR.. Bulls Cough Syr-
up has brought to the surface numerous imi-
tations. Keep a sharp lookout when you
buy.
Judge-What was your first step in
crime which led up to this daring
forgery. Prisoner i changed the
date on my wife's letters before I fin
ally mailed them.
Author-But why do you charge me
more for printing this time than usu-
al? Publisher-Because the compost
ors were constantly falling asleep
over your novel.
An exchange says that mans full
mental power is not reached before
the age of twenty five. Either this is
wrong or the college Freshman has
been misinformed as to himself.
Reggy Backbay-Mis de Mudd, are
you at all interested in psychology?
Miss de Mudd = Oh, yes, very much
indeed! But I know should break
my neck if tried to ride one"
eve used DR.. Bulls Cough Syrup in ny
family for long while, and wouldn't be with
out it, I know it's good medicine John
Harrison, Postmaster, Guyton, Dillingham;
Co., Ca
The British Museum contains the
first letter envelope ever made. It
was probably found in some mans
pocket, addressed in his wife's hand,
which accounted for it's preservation.
Little Flo, being censured by her
mother for some small mischief she
had been engaged in, sat thinking it
over'' for some time, and finally said
in complaining tone, "Everything
I do is laid on me.'
sit would be to Chicago's interest to
chip in and have New York's streets
cleaned" "Why SOP" "Visitors to the
Fair from foreign countries won't
be able to get to Chicago. They'll get
stuck in the mud in New York;
Fatal neglect is little short of suicide. The
known to need repeating. DR.. Woods Nor
way Pine Syrup cures cough promptly. Sold
by all dealers a guarantee of satisfaction.
zszz<e <Ezz=
In Henry & Johnson's Arnica and Oil Lini-
ment is combined the curative properties OF
the different oils, with the healing qualities
Of Arnica. Good for man and animal. Every
bottle guaranteed.
Children Cry for
@~>A>-.-