Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1893-10-12
Sprinkles of Spice.

SprinkleS OF Spicc'
No PEOPLE ever made any money
swapping grunts.-DallaS News.
IT is the deaf and dumb orator who
speaks feelingly, as it were. -Elmira
Gazette.
WHEN a baby is born it is usually
red but it soon becomes little yell
ler.-BOstOn Courier
In carrying a gun the great point
is to point the muZzle the other way.
Philadelphia Times.
CoBBLE-" allow do you find trader"
Stone-"That's the great trouble. /
can't find ."-Clothier.
ONE feature of a cyclone is worthy
of general imitation; it always does
its level best. Lowell Courier.
MILK has gone up half a cent a
quart in Brooklyn, but no rise of
cream is reported. Troy Press.
THE amateur photographer has
habit OF taking almost anything ex-
cept hint -Somerville Journal.
THE prize housckeeper a tenant
who can hold on for six months with
out paying any rent.-Galveston
News.
So FAR, no one has ever made the
blunder of painting Cupid to look
as if he had any sense -Atchison
| Globe.
A GROCER who had a lot Of Linn
burger cheese for sale advertised it
as an "unapproachable bargain. y
Siftings.
ABOUT all the buried treasures
most people have are the good reso-
buttons they have put away. Calves
| ton News
"THET comes" said Uncle Lie, 90
| the express company not hevin' their
money in old socks. - Cleveland
| Plain Dealer.
IT'S no use to ask the man who is
| going to have tooth pulled whether
he doesn't think this is just perfect
| day.-Somerville Journal.
Il FEEL myself beneath you," as
the man in the lower berth in the
! sleeper remarked to his companion
on the shelf above-Lowell Courier.
THE Tree-planting Society Of
Brooklyn is trying to check the nib
bling of trees by horses. 1t is GER
tainly a-gnawing. -Philadelphia Rec
ord.
BOTH lemons and figs can be done
without. So long as the native
peach is preserved the women will
put up with that. - Philadelphia
Times
LIFE" exclaimed the man who
enjoys being misanthrope, sis moth
ing but one long hustle for chunk
of ice or lump of coal. w Washing
ton Star.
IT was a small suburban youth
who explained that it was not SO
much the heat that troubled people
as the general humility. Boston
Transcript. @
THE woman who never had baby
of her own generally can't under
stand how it is that a mother can be
so foolish as to let her baby cry
Someryille Journal.
TIMES like these breed cautious
ness. A farmer whose poultry is in
! the basement of his barn sends us
word that even the hens are laying
low Buffalo Courier.
SOCIETY EDIToR-Here is woman
writing to us to know il grass wild
ow ought to wear mourning. Boss
Editor-She might wear green
lawn.-Indianapo Journal.
HICKs-"Smeddle always speaks
we'll of everybody" Wicks-"Mere
matter of habit He worked at cut
ting out tombstone epitaphs for sew
eral years. Boston Transcript.
MRS. Po1NDEXTER (horrifled)-"I
heard to-day that Mr. Collingwood
leads a double life" Miss Forty
| with a sigh That's much better
| than a single one. brooklyn Life.
SHE Gomantically)-I what hour
of inspiration do those beautiful
poems of yours come to you? He (ab-
stracted]y)-The time of the noon
mail delivery, mostly. Chicago Rec
| ord
| Miss MAY WATTS, of Boston, re-
Gently deceased, left all her estate of
| SIS. 900 to her pet cat, Otto, which
will be taken abroad. The cat should
come back with an Otto biography. -
| Philadelphia Ledger.
WATcHMAKER-My friend, / sus-
pect you've been putting kerosene oil
in this watch. George Bond-That
/ have. When watch goes in soak
so often something must be done to
counterfeit rust. Kate Fields Wash
ington.
WATTs-Is it true that you got
wind OF the bank failure before the
doors were closed? Potts-No, /
went down to get check cashed an
hour after the doors were closed. 1t
was then that got wind. Indian
aDoliS Journal.