The evening call. [volume] (Topeka, Kan.) 1891-1893, 1893-06-22
HUMOR OF THE WEEK.
STORIES TOLD BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.
Many Odd, Curious. and Laughable
Phases OF Human Nature Graphically
Portrayed by Eminent Word Artists OF
Our Own Day.



= butter fy.-Binghamton Leader.
= POET - "The manuscript of M
I poems is illegible; l must copy them.
What, again?"- Fliegende Blaettel
THE idea that a man in love has
far-away look in his eyes probabl
originated in crinoline times. Wash
ington Star.
, LAWYERS get rich minding othe
/ peoples business, but that's no ex
cuse for ordinary busybodies. -Somer
: vile Journal.
No WONDER people can't under
stand finance when it's alleged the
more gold goes abroad the closer ii
gets.-Philadelphia Times.
THERE'S wan unjoost thing about
ARMY pinsions, said Pat. Them
as lives gets it all and them as dies
gifts lift. "-Harper's Magazine.
The WESTERN VERSION. Peter
did you try tolive up to the golden
rule?" Chicago man-"Yep; | tried
to do others before they did me. p
Puck.
AIGH - "Bingleys wife doesn't
prove to be all that he fancied she
was. Bee-"Very likely; he got her
at bargain counter Boston Tran
script.
81 THINK the point we'll taken. +"
said Nupoppe softly to himself as he
stepped off the inevitable midnight
tack without so much as a sin
BRowN-''Mrs. j. appears to be in
cenSed against her laundryman. f"
Jones-"Yes, you see he ironed her
skirt plain and ruffled her temper"
-Binghamton Leader.
WIFE-"I have just been to the
dentists and had tooth drawn"
Husband (heaving sigh)-"Lucky
tooth! 1t is now beyond the reach of |
your tongue. DE Sobremesa.
'THERE must be wonderful |
amount of electricity in strawber-
rles. " Nonsense, man; why?" ''You
try pricing box and see if you don't
feel shocked. Chicago Inter Ocean.
WHY, what's the matter with the
ooy?" Il wuz seem how many ami
mails from my Noah's ark | could
hold in my mout, an I've been an
swallered giraffe an a zebra!"-
Life.
Il SHALL treat him in the most dis
tant manner, she said, Indignantly.
"How will you do it?" asked her
brother. "I'll never speak to him
except over the telephone!"-
ingtOn Star.
MERCHANT-"This style OF hat will
make your husbands face look very
wide. Wife-"That's why i am get
ting it; his face always looks so aw-
fully long after Christmas. Chicago
Inter Ocean,.
NEW HAVEN would have been
without bread for some days past,
owing to strike of her bakers, had
lot men from other cities been OBJ
yal1ed to supply her kneads. -Phila-
lelphia Ledger.
AT THE THEATER.- Hicks-~What
10 you think of Strideabout's per- {
ormance? He tells me he com |
nltted his part in half day." Wicks 1
Him! Don't you think he ought I
0 be committed himself?" !
HE-"Jerusalem! What made YOU [
her prizes? They'll cost fortune I
he-"Pshaw, we don't have to get t
n.y. they were to be given to the I
roman who didn't ask what's s
rumpS. Chicago Inter Ocean. b
SOLICITORS FRIEND-"If YOU are '
etermined in your intention to 90
pom the stage, / hope it is at least 2
18th high aim" Mrs De Voors- a
Don't worry about that. can kick
1ree feet over my head and not half 7
"" q
MISS tUZZIE-"I want to break nv :,
1gagement with Mr.. Sappie, but / y
)n't know bow To do it without -
irving the poor fellow to suicide =
title Brother-"Why don't you let :,
Im see you in curl-papers?7-Good n
ewS :,
DoCToR-"Well, my fine little fell b,
w, you have got quite well again. IL
was sure that the pills | left for To
III would cure you. How did YOU III
Ike them, in water or in cake9" bl
Oh, | used them in my pop-gun. 50
t-Bits.
TEACHER - What is the golden
xt? Dick Hicks-Is the servant al
eater than hls MASTER Teacher Oh
DIV Is the question answered. Dick In
lcks - In our house il is never Al
lsed- browning. King 4 Co Sh
1nthly. Str
PRAY inquired one minister ~ IN
other seeing so many ladies at IN
nd your church, why do you In In
riably address your congregation az "a
ar brethrens'" ooh, the reason tn'
easily given he replied. @the IN
ethren embrace the sisters Tit me
Is. the
won't Suit M ~. ~
you're not married. Young man
~ do you prefer your clerks tn te
lrTied< StOrekeeper - Because IL
/ the married ones are never IN tht
n rush TO close up at night and a. ~
We me as the single ones are M
lokiFn Life lux