The Providence news. (Providence [R.I.]) 1891-1906, 1893-12-20
THE NEWS, WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 20. 1893:


little worried this morning. You must
take better care OF yourself. don't
know what the country would do IL you
should break down with this congress on
your hands.
9. / know il. IL is this deep sense OF
indispensability that sometimes almost
give me tired feeling. But this Ha-
waiian business annoys me. If IL wasn't
for this confounded congress-
p. o, well, you don't mind congress, !
hope? / don't.
Q. Yet il is such nuisance to super
wise It.
p. know. Servants are such n care.
But you must try and bear IL the best you
can.
q. Why, some of them congressman
actually have the impudence to oppose my
policy.
II. What are we coming to?
q. And they have the cheek to call
themselves Democrats, too, the stupid,
obstinate scoundrelsl
P. Well, dunno, l sometimes think
that you and are about the only Demo-
Gratis left, old man.
G. Lett How left? Who says we're
left? o, / see. Yes, but I can't expect
NNtA1OOul 10 tulHRn uo Nth
as do. It's this perpetual feeling OF re-
sponsibility that makes me nervous.
p. ] know just how you feel. Some
times when put out my bedroom candle
at night, / think TO myself, great Scott,
how dark the world Is now.
G. Yes; Ive had the same thought.
remember just after my great message in
1887 was putting on my shirt one morn
ing, and, by thunder, sir, the sun rose as
soon as had buttoned the top button.
p. Some of the newspapers, heh, heh,
seem to think we sort o. toss our shirts on
this Hawaiian trouble.
C.. The newspapersi Faugh! Damn
the newspapers. II IL wasn't for the news
papers and congress
y. We could show 'em policy that
would make their eyes stick out.
G. Newspapers or no newspapers, con-
gress or no congress, when have taken
line of policy, won't bulge. i am
sticker. know what's right. i know
what's good for the country.
p. I'd like to know who does il you
don't?
e. What am here for? Pm no errand
boy; I'm the boss. See ?
p. They'll find that what you say goes
before they get through with you.
G. There's one thing you can be a
great help to me i'm. IL any OF them DEM
ocratic kickers come around asking for
an Office for their constituents you just
keep on telling 'em fair exchange Is no
robbery. Gentlemen, batch of Mr..
Cleveland's opinions goes with each Office.
Take the lot and we take your votes. Is
il bargain?
p. Beautiful, beautiful, and yet they
say we haven't got any tact. 1 guess we
can run about as good diplomacy counter
as any OF 'em.
G.. We do a thing or -t~e.- We're no
jays il we did come from Buffalo. But
the Hawaiian policy is
=. Sh-sh. [They whisper.]
@. Keeps 'em all agog, you see. Moth
ing like mystery. like to be mysterious.
/ enjoy it.
p. But congress will be bowling for
the papers.
G.. Let 'em howl am responsible to
the American people and the people have
supreme confidence in the rectitude of
my intentions and in the integrity of my
ratiocinations.
p. Don't waste that. Put 1t in the
spcciat message.
G. An act of justice to a sister poten-
tate defrauded of her throne by the base
Vaccinations Of
p. A lot of darned Americans, sons OF
missionaries and such trash.
G.. Hang'enl wish there were some
way of getting rid of'em. Pm afraid we
shan't be able to use the navy at present.
p. o, congress won't sit forever. And
the constitution
G. The constition is an Internal old
nuisance.
p. Pm with you there. But, then, we
can ignore 1t.
c. Yes, but the mrre thought OF it dis
pleases me.
p. It's too bad that we can't throw 1t
away, the way we did that tariff plank.
c. ! am all the constitution my coun-
try needs. My people are perfectly satis-
fled with me.
p. But the way we kicked over that
tariff plank, and let the constitution
suffer, was pretty good.
c. After you get in at the upper story
window, what more do you want of the
ladder?
p. The people know you.
G. My people are good after they find
out what ] want them TO do. They are
sometimes a little stupid, but in the end
they approve my course and gratefully
recognize their obligationsto my admin
istration.
p. Mr.. Cleveland, l think you are the
greatest statesman in the world.
G. Mr.. President, allow me to copgrat-
uIate you on giving the country the finest
administration it has ever seen, with
the possible exception of your first. Will
you kindly ring for Thurber? l want to
get him to tell the United Press that am