The Portland daily press. [volume] (Portland, Me.) 1862-1921, 1893-03-13
FlNN7,s rosoaeAN SLIDE.
When Snow Failed He Stole Tub Of But
ter to Make the Going Good.

when Snow Failed He Stole Tub of But
ter to Make the Going Good.
There is a low, sloping roof near
where 9-year-old Jimmy Walsh lives at
515 Washington street. When the snow
fell on the roof Jimmy invited his friend
Alphonse Costello, who Is two years
older than he, to come over and slide.
They slid--op barrel staves--and said 1t
was tout of sight" Young Costello,
who is known to the other members OF
the Happy Home gang Of Washington
street as 'sFinny.p is of reflective turn
Of mind.
Jimmy" said he, '4this SHOWS goin
ter melt. never seen snow yet wot
didn't melt just when yer didn't wanter
have it. What good'l our slide be Them
Jimmy didn't know.
ssWell, I'll tell yer then" pursued Fin
ny. .sWot's the matter wild butter fer
slide? Grease up yer roof an yer pants,
and there yer is"
The ideas of the Happy Homes re-
garding the ownership and requirement
Of property are vague. On the day fol-
lowing that on which Finny's brilliant
idea struck him tub of butter was
stolen from delivery wagon standing
on Washington street. The man in
charge Of the wagon informed the po-
lice that just before the butter was
stolen he had seen 'sa shmal handy
legged Eyetalian an a ridheaded divil
about a half size bigger foolin around
the place" Jimmy and Finny were ar
rested. They denied the robbery; but.
alas. their trousers were buttered. More
over, they were buttered IN the place
where it would do the most good In re-
duoing friction to a minimum when
sliding. The boys were taken to Jeffer-
son Market court, where Judge Ryan
was on the bench. When they saw him
the boys knees shook.
ssHully sufferin, smokin geeP suffered
Jimmy. cts his whiskerenes.
Justice Ryan looded at the two boys
.eYou boy with the black eye, have you
ever been arrested before?' said he.
eOn'y oncet, yer honor, replied Finny
meekly. 81 was up before yer honor.
It was when Jim Shea's oyster scow was
broke into las SUMMER, yer honor. I
happened to be in swin1nin there, an the
cor nabbed me- was honorably dis
charged by yer honor"
Agent Denbert of the Gerry society IN
terposed to remark that the oyster scow
in question was robbed at midnight,
when Costello or any other boy was not
likely to be in swimming, and, moreover.
that Costello was arrested on the scow
and was let off merely on account OF his
youth. Justice Ryan then expressed a
desire to know where and under What
circumstances he had experienced the
pleasure of Jimmy Walsh's acquaiat-
| ance.
"'Twasn't my fault, yer honof,"
whimpered Jimmy. How'd know tn
priest was comm along just thenf Wot
did dey leave tn blooming tin wash
boiler in tn winder fera How ed tell
tn bleedin boiler was goin t. smash his
| law wen it fell out? Did I know I was
| goin ter trip up an fall again ite Judge,
crisscross M heart, s. help me I never
touched th boiler anyway"
s.This Is the boy" explained Agent
Denbert, "who threw wash boiler out
Of a window in Washington street at a
priest who was passing by and hit him
on the head. That was about two months
ago. He was discharged because he said
it was an accident"
/ "Did you steal this butter?" asked JUS
tice Ryan.
"No, sir" said both boys at once.
s.some bigger fellers swiped it. Then
they done us dirt by putin ii on our
pantses."
swell, you're hard characters, any
way." said the Justice. ''Ill commit you
both to the Catholic protectory. New
i York Sun.