davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Catarr,, Cannot Be Cured

with LOCAL APPLICATIONS. as they cannot
reach the seat Of III DISEASE, CAturrh is II loOl
constitutional uiseas". and in order to cure it
you must take int"rnHl remedies. Halls fntrrrf
Cure is taken Internally. and acts directly on
the blood and mucous SurfHceS HATES tniarrtl
by one of the tcst physicians in this country ior
years, ana Is Il regular prescription. II Is com
posed OF the best TONES known. combined with
the best blood purifiers. acting directly On the
mucous surfaces. The pnre'r combination OF
the two ingredients j. what produces snrh won
drriu results in curing Catar h. SIND for testi
monias. free
+. i. CT ENEi 4 CO. Props. Toledo Q
Sold b. drugEiSts. urire nc.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Millions In 1t.

Servant, pounding on door-What
no! within there Awake, awake!
Dime Museum Owner-What means
this turmoil? Why at the midnight
hour do you arouse me from my
SAUNDERS?
Seryant-Peace, master, until you
have heard the joyful news. l have
here a messenger boy who has never
whistled '"Ta-ra-ra Boom-de-ay.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05

their laps, but this is awkward, and if
managers of first-class theatres want
this custom to prevail let them pro-
vide cloak rooms such as are found in
all London theatres, and there is GER
tain to be quick adoption of q plan
that only needs a leader to make it a
success,
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
The Lady in the Moon.

It is left to our 4OOth centennial to
celebrate charming discovery. 1t
seems not to be generally known that
the regal "man in the moon," who
for ages or cons has been looked up
to as sole ruler OF his planet, shares
his throne and divides his honors with
the loveliest semblance of woman.
Would you see her at her best let it
be on cloudless night as near the
full, of the moon as possible. Use a good
opera or field glass. Be patient;
some fail to find her at first. The
face is a profiel and looks toward
your left as you gaze, occupying half
the surface of the moon; the hair dark
and coiled rather high; her throat and
neck are radiantly beautiful. Beyond
her profile is seen the dark face of a
man looking straight forward.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
A Hint to Hotel Keepers,


The gentleman from the West pulled
himself up to the hotel table, tucked
his napkin under his chin, picked up
the bill of fare and began to study it
intently. Everything was in restau-
rant French and he didn't like it.
"Here, waiter" he said, sternly,
''There's nothing on this I want"
"Ain't there nothin' else you would
like tor dinner, SIR inquired the
waiter politely.
"Have you got any sine qua non?"
The waiter gasped.
ono, sir" he replied.
"Got any semper inem?"
"No, sir, we hain't."
"Got any tempus fugit?"
II reckon not, SIR"
"Got any soiree dansants?"
mo, SIR
The waiter was edging off.
SCOT any sine die?t'
"We hain't, SIR"
The walters face showed some signs
of intelligence.
"Seems like 1 heerd OBJ dat, sir"
and he rushed to the kitchen, only to
return empty handed.
"We amt got none, sir he said in a
tone of disappointment.
SCOT any NAL de mer?"
"N-no, SIR"
The waiter was going to pieces fast.
"Well, may be you've got some
bacon and cabbage and a corn
dodger?"
"Deed we has, sir" exclaimed the
waiter in tone of the utmost relief
and he fairly flew to the kitchen.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
FAIR WOMAN'S KINGDOM.
MATTERS OF INTEREST TO THE
WOMEN FOLKS.
Where Woman's Advancement Is
Appreciated--The Well dressed
Woman--Hatsa at the Theatres
The Medical Use OF Onions
--Feedlng the Sick.
Where woman's Advancement Is
Appreciated.

Where woman's Advancement Is
Appreciated.
In speaking of the rapid strides
made in the advancement of women,
William NJ. Salter, in his address be-
fore the Society for Ethical Culture,
says: "But the richest result of move
ments for the education and advance
ment OF women will be in the circle of
the home. There is no knowledge OF
history or philosophy, no acquaint-
ance with public affairs, no range OF
scientific study that may not come in
to play in q mothers education other
children. We do not always realize
that the advancement OF woman
means the advancement of man: Let
us be large and liberal in spirit; let us
say that henceforth man and woman
shall rise together, that great thoughts
and great aims shall inspire them
both, that together they shall work
for the humanization OF society, the
civilization of the race"
Now this is sentiment in which we
entirely agree. The home circle is the
one to be enriched by woman's best
thoughts and noblest ambitions; not
directly she receives q college educa-
ton, to look about for fields OF work
lar away from the surrounding of her
youth OF the circle other acquaintance.
We believe in women advancing in
thought and mental culture SO that
they are companionable wives TO their
husbands and instructive mothers
to their children. Let their wider
education reach them how to make
home pleasant, instead OF squirting
them on the platform or into the
arena Of politics. The work is just as
noble and the reward far greater,
though their fame may not extend
beyond the limits OF the affections OF
those closely akin to them.
Yet is not the praise ofhusband and
the happy smile of children when
mother can spare them an hour other
valuable time more appreciated by
the true woman than the applause Of
thousands who are as quick to con.
denim as ready to uphold. Public fav.
or is tleetng and evanescent. Today
you may bask in the sunshine of lead
ership in circles where the discussion
of abstruse topics exclude hehumblel
duties OF home, yet IL new light may
appear tomorrow and you will be as
though you had never been. But il
the home it is different, there you
shine with an undmmed radiance that
no rival can diminish or cloud des
troy; you are queen OF hearts, the
best and sweetest in the world, with
the noble title OF wife and mother.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
A Valuable Lesson,

Aspiring Author with big manu-
script editor is not in, Ell?
Well. I'll wait for him. Are you reg
ularlv employed her-?'
Office Boy-Sreat masazine-1ep."
Aspiring Author-"As good beginning
When you grow up you'll know
enough to be an author. won't your"
Office Boy-"fll know enough not
ter be-"
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
a Valuable Lesson,

Aspiring Author with big manu-
script The editor is not in, ell?
Well III wait Tor him. Are you reg
ularly employed here?'
Office Boy-Great magazne-Iep.
Aspiring Author: good beginning.
When you grow up you'll know
enough to be an author, won't yon?"
Office Boy-I'll know enough not
ter be-
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Society Would Sheer.

When man with a flushed coun-
tenance and excited air had rushed
from the house they FASTENED into
the parlor and found the woman with
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
He Knew Too Much.

Obsequious Darkey-'Scuse me, sab,
but you dropped dis yeah diamond
pin.
Gentleman-Um-er You're
very honest man.
Darkey-No, sab! Dat amt what
ails me. rs a potah in jewelry
sto.'
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Diam ond Cut Diam ond.

Dentist, impatiently,-We if you
can't calm yourself l can't fill your
tooth, for Pm Just about as nervous
as can be.
Patient-What's the matter?
Dentist-Why, I've got to have a
tooth filled, myself, this afternoon.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
The Most Pleasant Way

OF preventing the grippe, colds, head
aches and ievers is to use the liquid laXa-
tive remedy Syrup OF Figs. whenever the
system needs a gentle, yet effective cleans
ing To be benefited one must yet the
true remedy manutac' ured by the Calilor
MIA Fig Syrur Co., only. For sale by all
druggists in Soc and 81 bottles.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Drew.an Inference.

yJigsby-Hello! I thought you were
dead!
Jagsby-I don'tsee why you should.
Jigsby-Anyway, some one told me
you mad quit drinking.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Diamond Cut Diamond.

Dentist, impatiently,-Well, ii you
can't calm yourself can't ill your
tooth, for Pm Just about as nervous
as can be.
Patient-What's the matter?
Dentist-Why, I've got to have q
tooth filled, mysels. this afternoon.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05

Physicians prescriptions have failed to
reach many a-eS OF rheumatism know to
have been Subsequently cured by salvation
Oil. That is the reason why the popular
voice is practically unanimous in its favor
% cents.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
The Well-Dressed Woman.


In every assembly there are a few
women whom one instinctively choos-
es as the best lady present. There
may be others whose attire cost three
times as much, or whose modiste
charges prices that only the very rich
can afford to pay, yet these DANES
who think that the big bill that &C
companies the gown in question
stamps it as above criticism are very
much mistaken, though happily for
themselves they are in ignorance OF
the fact.
1t is the appropriateness OF a
dress that gives it it's distinctive
charm. The woman who wears to an
informal reception such q costume as
would be in keeping at the Queens
drawing room may consider, because
OF it's length OF train, its rich brocade
and it's elaborate trimmings, that her
gown surpasses all tine simple little
crepe de chine or evening silk costumes
that are present. But she is mist taken,
DIG 40 CuClLCly wv LluGlA OFCI
dressed for such an occasion, and
though conspicuousy attractive owing
to her error, it is no admiration that
she wins from the many who note her
gorgeous pumage.
Because you possess beautiful silk
and velvet gown do not be so anxious
to show it that you will put it on to
wear on a shopping expedition.
Though appropriate and elegant for
calling or an afternoon reception it is
quite out of place on a business thor
oughfare. Fal-lals are not for the
street. Conservative dressing for
promenades of all sorts is most ap.
propriate. Aim to be the simplest
gowned person present at all func-
. tions, rather than make the mistake
of overdressing, though, of course,
there is a happy mean which combin-
ed with appropriateness will win for
you always the encomiums of those
whose criticism is worth having and
will never cause yon to blush from a
sense OF your own conspicuously at
tired person.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Transferring Photographs.

To remove q photograph from an
old or dirty mount the surplus should
be cut away; it should be put into a
plate OF cold water and be allowed to
float off. A little warm water will as
sist in it's coming away more easily,
but should it not do so, the photo
graph has probably been mounted
with solution of india rubber and
the print may be easily peeled off.
Very hot water is likely to set up a
reaction if the prints were not we'll
washed by the photographer when
first sent out. Mounting photographs,
white boards should as q rule, be
avoided, because the color OF the
boards is more pure than the lights OF
the photograph, and deaden the ef-
feet. A toned or tinted board is more
desirable.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05

\ record of uninterrupted cures for near
ly halt a century has convinced -cn>iblc
people, that DR.. Bulls Con II Syrun i the
best in the market. Why try new things.
when You know, that You have what You
need. 1t is iniAlllb!e.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05

c. C. Wedge a brakeman on the Milwau-
kee & Northern road had his hand badly
manglcd at Chiffon. Five fingers were
amputatcl.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05

Thomas Clear u brakeman on the Chica-
so T. NorhW Western Railway, fell from q
freight train at Racine and was badly in
iured internally
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
The Rule Has ExoeptIons.

Few proverbs will stand universal
application. Conceding the general
virtue OF going slow, how about it
when the horse car is the subjectf
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Put to Practical Use.

Sylvanus-Did yo' see any fling OBJ
my bagpipe, Miss Campbell?
Miss Camr.ell-Lo' d wszdat pipe?
Nah dun stuffed it wifi sausage meat.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
The Spirit Had Gone,

"Who's there?" shouted the occu-
pant OF h tel bedroom, as he heard
noise in the corner OF his room.
There was no answer and the queer
noise stopped.
"Anybody thcre?'
at must have been q spirit" he
said to himself, 81 must be q medium.
I will try. (AloudD Ii there is q spirit
in the room it will signify thesa by
saying ay-no, that's not what I
mean. II there is q spirit in the room
it will please rap three times.
Three very distinct raps are given in
the direction OF the bureau
us it the spirit OF my sister,"
No answer.
us it the spirit OF my mother-in-
law"
Three very distinct raps.
"Are you harpy?"
Nine raps.
DO you want anythinC?"
A succession at very loud raps.
"Wlll you give me any communica-
lion If get up?"
No answer.
"Shall hear from you tomorrow"
Raps are very loud in the direction
of the door.
"Shall | ever see you?"
He waited long Tor an answer, but
none came and he turned over and fell
asleep.
Next morning he found the spirit"
OF his mOther-ln-laW had carried of
his watch and purse, his trousers and
his great coat.-Northwest Magazine.
His Name on Every Tongue.
"Years and years ago." said the To-
quacious travelling man, as he rested
his feet on one OF the best chairs in
the lobby OF the Ryan hotel and took
a careless shot at the cuspador, "therc
came to this country o man who had
not a dollar in his pocket. To-day
his name is heard in every hamlet in
the country, and it is familiar to
every schoolboy and girl in the United
States. The queer thing about it is
tilaC ne never dld anything OF a par
ticularly brilliant or sensational
character"
at must have been Carnegie" said
the shoe drummer.
"No, it was Jay Could" said the
clothing salesman.
"Iou're both wrong. 1t was Chris
TOPPER Columbus" said another.
you are all wrong" said the first
speaker.
"Well, then, who was it," asked the
clothing salesman.
John Smith"
Then they all walked into the room
distinguished by the array of bottles
and glasses, and the clothing salesman
threw a dollar on the polished surface
OF the bar
"Its worth it," he remarked. I'll
sell goods with that joke. st. Paul
Pioneer Press.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05

Frank Gordon, OF Wausau, has q contract
to put in 5, 90, coo feet of logs for the JOSEPH
Dcssen Lumber Company, of Mosinee, tin.
winter
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Strange. but True,

Baker-But it's really impossible
for me to lend you any money. Why
don't you 60 to somebody that knows
you?
Smith-That would be of no use at
all, my dear sir. It's a perfect
stranger I want.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05

Tho Spirit Had
Gone.
Still at It.
"I'd like to have you tell me, if you
can," observed the exchange editor,
glancing rather slightly over his shout
der, "what is the difference between
$50 diamond and custard pie?"
II don't see anything hard about
that" answered the financial editor,
with scorn. Zone is simon pure and
the other is pie, man, sure"
"No," rejoined the other. 'That
won't do. That's simply horrible"
"Then it's because one is charcoal
made over and the other is made over
a charc oal-"
"That's worse yet"'
"You needn't get crusty about it!'
"W'hy not" exclaimed the exchange
man, bristlinc up.
because" retorted the man OF fin
anoe, coming up gamely, "custard pie
isn't"
"It is though-at bottom"
81 call that a pretty lowdown-"
"You talk like half-baked-"
"Stop! You stick to your paste
ry"
"Thnt's what Pm doing. What is
the difieren between a $50 diamond
and a custard pie?"
Zone is within the range OF a capt.
alist and the other has been taken
entirely out OF the range
"Shucks"
"Anything about their being cussed-
hard il they'r not good?
"Naw"
Zone is sometimes in soak and
the other is always soaked when you
get down to hardpan."
''1'hat isn't so bad" said the ex-
change editor, rehectively, "but it
doesn't go. You haven't got it
yet"
"Wel1, what is the difrerence?" de-
manded the financial editor, wheeling
his chair around and glaring at him.
"Ehe difference. said the man OF
exchanges, in a cold, hard tone of
voice. ''is $40, rs"
And they don't speak now.
Too Much on the Shoot.
Omen sht at amountain town in Ken
lucky Twas seated on hefront porch Of
the tavern Warrington bed time to come
along, when a tall, strappin, fellow
lounced through the office and drop
ped into q chair beside me.
stranger in these parts?" he said
inquiringly.
"a little somewhat so," l replied,
glad Of the chance to talk % somebody
Though I've been over 81 section OF it
in the last month"
"What do you think OF it?'
"NNel! it might be worse"
eyes, dispose so;but I've studied up
some and don't see exactly how"
ooh, it isn't all bad" said encour-
agincly.
81 reckon not" hereplied, in half
hearted way; I never heard anybody
say anything against the model char
acter OF our mountains; our trees
would stand well in any community;
the Cumberland River is clean. and
our COWS are, as a rule, peaceable and
well disposed"
The mans answer surprised me not
q little. [ had not heard any native
talk quite as he did, and l WAS inter-
esred. do you belong here?' | in
CURED.
"Yes; never lived anywhere else"
"What business ar" you in?"
"Im u school teacher
"Oh, you teach the young idea how
to shoot, do your"
"Not much" he replied, with en-
phasis; cts born right in 'em, and
that's what ails the whole country"
Probably he knew what he was
talking about.-Exctiange.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Farewell the KISS.

To some members OF the COM
munity it may be u shock to learn
that kissing is doomed. Fashion, in
the shape OF the New York woman,
has decided that it is high time to
abolish the custom among women,
and it is only d matter OF time be,
fore the humblest and the most gush-
ing among them must yield. For
some time past there has been q lack
OF the indiscriminate embracing in
public for which we were once criticised,
but now the fin de steele woman is
carrying the reform into her home.
Even in solitude she does not kiss her
friend,
There is, however, a very pretty
substitute for the tabooed embrace.
Mrs. Manhattan now gives Miss Muir
ray Hill q gentle tap Oh the shoulder
and murmurs, "Consider youself
kissed!' and Miss Murray Hill then
trips thankfully away with the senti-
ment in her heart, and, what is much
more important to her, with her vest
and bangs in good order and in the
right place.-New York World.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05

wealth 81 yellow hair bathsd in
tears and hysterical.
They com!orted her as best they
might.
Gradually she regained certain de-
gre OF composure and was able to
talk little.
He-he-he-h-e's b-b-brute," she
sobbed.
They exchanged significant glances
and comforted her some more.
"Wha-wh-what do you th-th- think
he w-w-wanted?" she falterincly de-
manded.
Whey hadn't the slightest idea, but
we1S eager to be enlightened.
"sle s-seid-boo, boo-that-that he
w.wswas g-ss,ss-boo.o-o-going to get a
divorce from me-"
She buried her face in her hands.
They sighed collectively.
II d-d-dldn't care for that"-
Her distress was becoming terrible
to benold.
$50 b-but he s-s,said lie w-w-wouldn't
charge ME with anything but odd
desertion Boo.o-ooo. Wha-what will
s-society"-
She wruns her hands.
-"c-care Tor a w-woman d-divorced
Tor c-c-common d-d-desertion?"
Sinking helplessly to the floor She
would have swooned but for the
| quick use OF reStOrativeS.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
THESE WILLCAUSE SMILES.
TREND OF THE MINDS OF THE
MODERN HUMORlSTS.

Too Much on the Shoot--His Name
on Every Tongue--A Hint to
Hotel Keepers---Still at It,
Society Would Sheer
The Spirit Had
Gone.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Wanted Revenge.

Visitor-Why, how bigyou ares grow
ing, Tommy. II you don't look out
you'll be getting taller than your
father.
TOMMY don't care if I do. I'll
get even then. Pop'll have to wear
all my old pants cut down for HIM.
Boston Life.
Courier Democrat. (Langdon, N.D.) 1891-1920, 1893-01-05
Feeding the Sick.

Otlate years the art of nursing the
sick has been brought to such perfec-
ton that there is little left to be de-
sired, but it is more recently that the
equally important branch OF practical
medicine, the invalid's diet, has re-
ceived the amount of attention 1T
merits. The sick mans diet, although
it must be strictly framed in accord
ance with we'll known rules OF practice,
need be neither monotonous nor I'M
palatable. At one time there was lit.
tie or no medium between the diet OF
robust health, somewhat limited to
suit individual requirements, and the
meagre and unsppetizing round OF
fluid nourishment APPLY termed
"slops" which formed the staple food
OF all who were at all seriously
ill. Now that the principles under
lying the process OF digestion in health
and disease are so much better under
stood, considerable change, to the
sufferer great advantage, has taken
place. Partly through a more judi
cious selection, and partly on account
of the many very excellent artiticially
digested foods that are to be met with
in the market, the dieting" OF to-day
is by no means the unpleasant pro-
cess it used to be, and the equity or
dyspeptic individual will find far
larger field OF choice open to him than
his fathers possessed.-Dr. Burnet, III
Food and Dietaries.
The Medical Use OF Onions.
The sweet Italian, or the Bermuda
onions, are the ones to be eaten au
naturel, the flavor being much more
delicate than the common varieties.
But onions are really sweeteners OF
! the breath after the local effects have
passed away, as they correct stomach
disorders and carry off the accumula-
ted poisons OF the system. They pro.
vide q blood purifier that all may
freely use, and do perfect work in con-
stipation troubles. AS a vermifuge
the onion cannot be surpassed, and,
eaten raw, will often check q violent
cold in the head. One small onion
eaten every night before retiring is
well-known doctors prescription fol
numerous affections OF the head, and
is highly recommended for sleep ess
ness; it acts on the nerves in a sooth
ing way, without the injurious effects
OF the drugs SO often applied. The
heart OF an onion, heated and placed
in the ear, will often relieved the agony
OF earache, while the slrup procured
from sprinking q sliced onion witt
sugar and baking in the oven, is sale
to work wonders in q "croupy" child