The Anderson intelligencer. [volume] (Anderson Court House, S.C.) 1860-1914, 1893-03-08
All Sorts of Paragraphs.

Some men want full measure even
when they are bargaining for bushel OF
misery.
- It's good thing to take the world
as you find it; but don't take all of it at
once.
-"I suppose your teacher is very fond
Of you, Georgie?" eyes. She keeps me
with her two hours after school nearly
every day."
: For cure of rheumatism, neuralgia,
cuts, sprains, burns, stings, chilblains,
sciatica, and lumbago, use Salvation Oil.
No table of liquid measure in the
books states the fact, but person, If he
tries, can get peck Of trouble out Of
pint of whiskey.
-"she has something of tongue,
they say" "souething of topgueS
Well, I should say she has. Why man,
she talks in her Sleep"
-"Do you believe man is made of
dust, Mr.. snip?" "Not all of them,"
said the tailor. "Dust always settles, and
know men who do not"
Philadelphia is entitled to be known
as the city Of sisterly love. According TO
recent police census, the city boasts Of
SO, 600 more women than men.
She: You are awfully young TO be
called colonel. he: Well, I've been in
1S engagements, and the girl and l,
fought like the deuce in every one. ~
old Soak: Deliriura tremens date
back to the beginning Of the world.
Jaggs: How do you make that outf Old
Soak: Eve saw snakes, didn't shef
Robert Rymsn, of Versailles, Ky,
is the oldest miller in the United States,
and is now operating mill huilt 100
years ago, and still uses the primitive
machinery.
- The cheapest dress made by Worth,
the Parisian milliner, even if Of cotton,
does not cost less than $3.50, and this be
calls his "pauvrette costume"-the poor
girls dress.
- Ten Broke: "Do you think your
father will oppose our union ?" Phoebe:
"No; he had leg and an arm shot of
in the Confederate service and guess
he's had enough of that"
why do you sign your name J.
John B. B. B. Bronson 2" asked Haw-
kius. because it is my name," said
Bronson. II was chrisrened by minis
ter who stuttered."-Life.
Memory is sweet to the man who
can look back over his past life and say
truthfulIy that he has wlllfully harmed no
one; been dishonest with no one; enemy
to no one and friend to all. Such
man is blessing to the world.
"A young country editor fell in leve
with a clergyman's daughter. The next
time be went to church he was rather
taken aback when the preacher announc
ed his text: "My daughter is grievously
tormented with devil"
Mamma: What in the world are
you making such 8 noise down there for?
Roderick: To let you know how good
am. Mamma: Why do you think you
are good when making 80 great noise7
Roderick: Because you always say I'm
in mischief when I'm quiet.
- Clergymen, lawyers, public speak.
ers, fingers, and actors, all recognize the
virtues of Ayers Cherry Pectoral. One
of our most eminent public men says:
ut is the best remedy that can be pro.
cured for all affections CT the vocal organs,
throat, and lungs"
- Gummy-"It seems natural for the
Presidents to be Oabinet-mskers. Two
noted ones were wood-workers. Clan.
ders-"Who were they 2" Gummy-
washington chopped down q cherry
tree and Lincoln split rails.
"I have used Ayers Hair Vigor for
a number of years, and it has always
given me satisfaction. It is an excellent
dressing, prevents the hair from turning
gray, insures its vigorous growth, and
Keeps the scalp white and cleap."-Mary
A. Jackson, Salem, Mass.
y If you love Others, they will love
you. Ifyou speak kindly to them, they
will speak kindly to you. Love is repaid
With love, and hatred with hatred.
Would you hear sweet and pleasant
echoes, speak sweetly and pleasantly
yourself.
About eight years ago, while living
in Illinois Mrs. V. D. Dake, now of Not
ioway County, Va, stepped on 9 needle,
which broke off in her foot. The broken
piece was extracted at the hospital at
Crewe few days since, being taken out
at her threat.
Justice: How do you explain your
being found inside Colonel GiDger's
chicken.-coop last night? Leftover jack
SON: De truft is, Jedge, I made all ma
'rangements ter git up 'srly in de moh.
nin', and / wanted ter sleep vhah l cud
heah de roosters crow.
Clergyman examining Sunday
School class y "Now, can any of you tell
Id what are sins of omission9" Small
Scholar "Please, sir, they're sins yen
ought to have committed and haven't"
- Briggs-1 called on Miss Birdseye
the other day in my new suit, and when
I kissed her she was quite indignant,
until told her it was always the custom
to christen q new suit in that way.
Griggs-Then what did she say? Briggs
She wanted to know if that was the
only new suit I had.
One day We we're dining ct res
tauraut noted for its excellent cooking