Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1893-09-07
Let us All Laugh.

THE dollar OF our daddies is the
dolor Of their descendants Boston
Transcri pit
LOVERS are fond Of star-gaaing be-
cause Of its sigh-dear- cal suggestions
Boston Courier.
The man who makes music-box
cylinders has some excuse for putting
on airs. Buffalo Courier.
ETHEL-But you were well off be-
fore you were married. Maud-Yes;
but didn't know it.-Life.
The saddest of all songs is that Of
the collector: "A due, kind friends, n
Plaindealer.
YACHTING costumes for women are
far more stylish than nautical. They
yacht not to be 80. Troy Press.
TEACHER-John returned the book
In what case is bookp Dull boy (after
a long Bookcase. Good
News
"SIzzARD' is a syggignocism used
to define a hot wave or wind, and is
particularly appropriate just now
Lockport Union,
WHEN woman calls her son to
come just "for Il minute" he knows
she wants him to work an hour. -
Atchison Globe.
A CAT may look at "a king, but she
wants to keep both eyes open when
she looks at the family hotel janitor
Somerville Journal.
"AFrER the bawl is over" the baby,
father can leave off dancing up and
down the floor at midnight, and
sleep boston Gazette.
A BASEBALL pitcher should never
find fault, else the crowd might
straightway proceed to work the
growler. -Boston Transcript.
CoRN-BLossoMs are the fashionable
flowers in Paris. They were always
the rage in Kentucky and arc worn
on the nose. Chicago Tribune.
CLARA-"How has your dress
maker been treating you?" Maud
ooh, splcndidly. But she has been
suing father. - Detroit Free Press.
"D!CK doesn't seem to have SO
much interest in the races as he
used" well, no. He's putting the
principal there now. Detroit Trib-
une.
How MUCH easier it seems to be to
advertise the finding OF a handker
chief with hole in the corner than
purse with a dollar in the corner. --
Dansville Breeze.
THE burlesque actress who fell
through hole in the sidewalk in
Louisville and broke her leg feels as
bad as Patti would if she had caught
a cold. Boston Globe.
BRoaGs-"Hello. Mulligan, haven't
seen We for month ! heard We had
gone to work" Mulligan Gndig-
nantly)-"Work? Nav I've been
cleaning the streets for Tom Bren-
an."-Life.
BoGGs - "You might talk until
doomsday and you couldn't convince
me that dueling isn't murder" Biggs
AL right. III take you over TO
France with me and let you see some.
OF it. Troy Press.
A MASTER butcher had twins. He
at once announced The fact to his
parents as follows: Il write in great
haste to inform you that my wife has
just presented me with couple of
twins. More next time."-Hinkender
Bote.
Nervous pAssENaEE-"Why are
you steaming along at such fearful
rate thrt ugh this fog?" Ocean Cap
tain (rcassuringiy)-"Fog are very
dangerous, madam, and j am always
in hurry to get out OF them. New
York Weekly.
FIRST BoY-ls that good watch
dog? Second Boy--No "Good bird
dog?" Nope" Good for rabbits?"
Nope" knows some tricks, may
be-" "Nixie." what is he good
for?" "Nawthin', only to take prizes
at dog shows. Good News.
IT may be observed in the general
din Of embarrassed banks and flnan-
cial agencies that many Of them
wouldn't be in such straitened Cir
cumstances if there weren't some
crooked circumstances accompanying
them. philadelphia Ledger.
MISS LAURA--"Oh, auntie! You
remember Mr.. Meeker, who went
from here as missionary? have
Just heard that those awful cannibals
ate him." Aunt Sophronia-*La,
me. do hope they cooked him with
turnips The poor, dear man was so
fond OF turnips. Tit Bits.
INDIGNANT tourist Ito Partisan
hotel manager who has just present.
ed his bilD-"See here. You have
charged me fifty confines for writing
paper, and you know very we'll you
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