Freeland tribune. (Freeland, Pa.) 1888-1921, 1893-07-10
TIIEODORE'S PROPOSAL.

Theodore Shy was an exceedingly
bashful man, and when, after much
debating in his mind, be decided To-
take wife, his thoughts at once
| turned to matrimonial paper as the
best means for attaining his object.
Theodore Shy, at the time OF con.
templating this most serious STEP
was thirty-six years of age. Passably
good-looking, goodtempered, good.
natured, he possessed good house,
a good income, and all he required
was a good wife to make his home
happy.
While matters were at this stage,
Theodore was brought to Il full STOP,
and for this reason he could not con-
coct a suitable advertisement
He was in this dilemma for two
days, when he determined to seek
the advice of a lady friend-a young
widow, who had often commiseratcd
him on his solitary lot.
Mrs Ready was an old friend
whom he had known before her mar.
riage, and was the only person he
felt he could take into his confidence,
being assured Of her sympathy and
dscreetness. She was at this time
but twenty-five years of age and ex.
ccedingly pretty.
He saw the young widow in her
morning room and she met him with
extended hand and a smile Of wei
come.
After talking of the weather OF
yesterday the prospects of ditto fol
to-day and tomorrow, Theodore
sought an Opening to the object OF
his call.
II wish to seek your advice on o
matter of great import to myself"
YES"
"There is no one else of whom ]
should care to ask this advice, and
feeling sure OF your sympathy and
help | determined to be guided by
your counsel, if you will be so good as
to give it."
The widow, much surprised and
impressed by his extreme seriousness,
expressed her inclination to laugh,
and said she would be pleased to help
him in any way in her power.
"Well, the fact is" he said, II am
contemplating marriage, and know
ing you-knowing you to be-"
Yes" said the widow demurely.
"knowing you to be more ex.
perienced in such matters, and being
50 kind-So good-so o"
Here the pretty widow blushed and
looked lovelier than ever. "Yes,"
She said in low tone, moving lit
tie nearer to him, land -"
"And SO dlsinterested. Here she
gave him an unuterable look of re-
proach. Il thought | could not do
better than to ask your advice as to
the lady | wish to marry"
Mrs. Ready looked puzzled. Was
he not going to propose after all?
"Who is the lady?"
"Well. ah. the fact is / don't know.
No" he went on hurriedly "You
see l expect there would be great
deal of Chaff at such an old bachelor
as myself getting married, and | am
anxious to avoid it,"
Theodore had by some process of
reasoning come to believe he was too
old to dream Of marriage. The widow
thought otherwise and ventured to
say So
well, at any rate" he said, ''my
friends think so and would ridicule
the idea. so I've been thinking OF
using the columns of a matrimonial
paper for the purpose.
The widow looked aghast
"What co you want me to do?"
'The fact is, :" he confessed, Il can't
make out such an advertisement as ]
should like, and l want YOU to help
Inc to word one if you will be so
kind"
Mrs. Ready was amazed, and not
little disappointed.
Writing materials being on the
table, the widow sat down and took
piece of paper on which to commit
notes.
"Frst of all" said the lady, "whal
sort of wife do you want?"
"Really," he said, II cannot de.
scribe the sort of lady l should like.
You see, it seems so foolish, es-
pecially for me-"
"Well, then,n replied his compan.
ion who had apparently received an