The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1893-06-28
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

Truth.
A peck of trouble-Four quarts Of
green apples.
In contempt of court-The con-
firmed bachelor Truth.
Tunefully considered, the human
neck lisa pipe organ. Evansville Breeze.
A bridge should never be condemned
until it has been tried by its PIERS
Judge.
Women certainly have room enough,
in these times, TO laugh in their sleeves.
Puck.
Some housekeepers are so exasper-
atingly industrious that they give the
dust no time 20 settle. Truth.
In politics the coming man finds the
roads badly blockaded by the going
man.-Cleveland Plain Dealer.
People speak of the face of note
when it's really the figure that inter
ests them. Philadelphia Times.
Jagson says the messenger boy moves
so slowly that he has come to be O
standing joke. .-Elmira Gazette.
A fashionable woman is one who has
what everybody else has before any
body else gets it. -Elmira Gazette.
Trite sayings rhymed are liked by some;
They'll like this one, no doubt
The schoolgirls string of chewing gum =
Is sweetness long drawn out"
Truth.
Only man bearing title can be
considered ''real live" nobleman on
the simple evidence that he merely
breathes
There is nothing especially irritat.
ing about an air of Importance, pro-
vided it is being sung instead of being
worn.-Puck.
The people who follow the fashion
most religiously generally look as if
they were trying to get ahead of it
Somerville journal.
A young man with pushing qualities
can always get something to do, even
if it is nothing better than engineering
a lawn wower. Buffalo Courier.
The humble individual who saws
wood for living is of more benefit TO
his race than the man who does moth
ing and that poorly. Troy Press.
Hunger overcomes superstition. II
man is really hungry thirteen is no
more unlucky than thirty, if the vic
tuals hold out. -Dansville Breeze.
o, what's the use o grievin'?
We're jes in love with life
For the blossoms on the melon A..
An the edge is on the knife?
Atlanta Constitution. \
The dividing line between inquisi-
tiveness and impertinence is largely
imaginary. Few people can be in
quisitive without being impcrtinent.-
Troy Press.
Hello, Charlie Not at work?
What's up?" "Oh, we're ont on a
strike. whats the trouhle?" Don't
know; but Wen not give in till we get
it. t."-Boston Beacon.
Columbus and Newton. Franklin and Watts.
In their discoveries found great zest
Yet what to compare with the joy OF the man,
With quarter he finds in a last summers
vest
The man who is hailed as a public
spirited benefactor at the time loan
IS wanted may live TO hear himself
howled at as II blood-sucking vampire
when the money falls due. Truth.
He asked her II she thought popcorn
Was good for Indigestion
She said she didn't know would h3
Please pop some other question.
Kansas City Journal.
When man speaks disparingly of
everybody, one of three things is true:
He has the "big head, is on bad terms
with himself, OF has an intensely jealous
and enyious disposition. st. Paul
Globe.
Poverty is disease" howled
speaker. "And yet" murmured the
poor chap in the back of the hall, I'VE
who are afflicted with it are arrested
whenever we take anything for itw-
Vogue
Mudge-'That waiter in there is en-
;irely too smart for his business"
Hapsley-"Why" Mudge-'I told
him to get me u rare steak, and he said
t couldn't be done. INDIANAPOLIS
1ournal.
He - "Bwothah Chawley has the
bwain feyah and he cawn't lind anprse
aigh or low" She-"Sit up with him
yourself There is no human posi-
bility Of your catching the disease. -
Detroit Free Press