Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1893-05-22
JUST FOR FUN.

Love, Sunshine & Co. is the name
of Johnstown, Penn, firm.
People know the shad season is at
hand. They feel it in their bones.
You can sometimes tell when a man
begins to backslide, by his breath.
1t is odd that the cyclone leaves SO
much ruin behind, when it carries ev
erything before it.
Who was the first wheelman? Faith
er Time. From the beginning he has
gone on by cycles.
| When 1 began using E1y's Cream Balm my
| catarrh was SO bad had headache the who lie
| time and discharged a large amount of filthy
matter. That has almost entirely disappear
| ed and have not had headache since. J. H.
| Sommers, Stephey, Conn.
When a man persists in drinking
like fish he shouldn't complain if he
finds his reputation growing scaly.
There are men with natures so small
that, if there is anything in transmit
grafton, they will probably appear as
| microbes.
Little Beth lin the country Grand
papa, you must have to keep an awful
lot of policemen there is such lot of
grass to keep off.
"Who was Louis XIV. of France?'
asked the teacher. ''I know" said
little girl. ''He was the man who
made all our chairs"
Teacher Name some of the most
important things existing to-day that
were unknown a hundred years ago
Tommy-You and me.
elbows this, Mrs. Sudds? My col
lars look very limp and detected this
week." "P'raps it's because I used
sad iron on 'em, sir.'
The world is always interested in the cure
of consumption; yet its prevention is of far
more Importance. DR.. Woods Norway Pine
Syrup is guaranteed to cures coughs and
colds. Sold by all dealers on guarantee of
satisfaction.
eff should propose to you, Maud,
what would your answer be?" ''I'm
such 1 do not know, Mr.. Ramsen, wo-
men are very foolish at times.'
Man has two eyes and but one con-
science; fact which may account for
the great ease with which man detects
others faults than he does his own.
Englishman--Hov you braves bed
steads? Hotel Clerk - No, the bed
steads are made Of soft wood; but
you'll find the mattress nice and hard.
ga stitch in time'often saves Consumption. |
Downs Elixir used in time saves life.
Bishop Cullen it is good work !
and trust you believe in maintaining
foreign missions. Indeed I do. Why, |
papa sees Mr.. Cleveland every day
about one!
Kate, what has become of the po-
rous plaster I left in that desk? Po-
rous plaster! Why, I thought it was
one of those new postage stamps, and |
1 put it on letter to ma.
Miss Elder think it was real mean
in you to tell Mr.. Spatts I was % yrs.
old. Miss Fosdick-W Why, you surely
didn't want me to tell him how old
you really were?
BUCKLENs ARNIcA SALvE.-The Best Salve
n the world for Cuts, Bruises Sores, Ulcers,
Salt Rheum, Fever Sores, letter, Chapped
Hands, Chilblains, Corns, and all Skin Erup-
ions, and positively cures Piles, no pay re-
luired. 1t is guaranteed to give perfect sat
sfaction, or money refunded. Price Is cents
per box For Sale by H. c. Pierce.
School Teacher-What little boy can
ell me where is the home of the swal-
ow? Bobby kin. School Teacher
Well, Bobby? Bobby-The home of the
swallow is the stummick.
st. Peter-Enter. Why DO you hes
tate? New Spirit = I don't see any
Usher. st. Peter-Sit down where you
please. New Spirit Dear me! how
lifferent heaven is from our church.
In Henry Johnson's Arnica and Oil Lini-
nent is combined the curative properties of
he different oils, with the healing qualities
# Arnica. Good for man and animal Every
ottle guaranteed.
sThis bell,n said a well meaning
exton, when showing the beIfry of
IN interesting village church to a par
y of VISITORS" is only rung in case of
! visit from the bishop of the diocese,
fire, flood, or any such calamity.''
Cost1veness is the primary cause of much
lsease, DR.. Henry Baxters Mandrake Ritters
ill permanently cure costiveness Every I
Ottle ranted.