Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1893-12-28
OUR BUDGET OF FUN
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND DO
INGS HERE AND THERE.
Jokes and Jokelets that Are Supposed tO
Have Been Recently Born-Sayings ana
Doings that Are Odd, Curious, and Laagh~
able--The Weeks HumOr.
Let Us All Laugh.

Let Us All
THE season is here when the bra-
vest Of us are glad to get underi
cover.-Buffalo Courier.
FROM the rumpus which Mello is
soft as he might be.-LoWell Conrier~l
TIE professional photographer anG
the amateur hold entirely ditferenS
views of the same things. Yonkers
Statesman.
UGLY rumors are atloat respecting,
the Bank of England. Our deposits
have been removed. MATTHIAS Vine~
yard Herald.
WHEN you loan man 80 you are
apt to learn that it is no easy thing
ito pursue the even tenner Gle MS
Falls Republican.
A woMAN's lot is cast among hard
lines when she is trying to crawE
through barbed-wire fence. Ring
hamton Republican.
IN declaring all further Indians
wars Off Secretary Lamont is probably
waiting for the dimenoyel man to-
catch up.-Plain Dealer
LATE STAYER-"Why, the lamp is
going out" Effie (tired and sleepys
Il suppose it thinks it's time some
thing went out. "-Texas Siftings
STALATE-"I wish could do some.
thing to achieve notOrlety." Ethel
Knox-"Why don't you try Sudden
disappearanceo"- Harper' Weekly.
Il HEAR Galley is going on the
stage in farm yard play" Yes y.
Us he to take a leading part?" Yes
He leads in the COWS. "-Harper's Ba-
Ear.
PROSECUTING ATTORNEY - what
is your age, Miss Sere?" Miss Sere
appealing to Judge)-"Does a viii
ness have to testify against herself?"
Life.
AT Naples: Tourist-"That's Ve-
suvius. isn't il?" Policeman-"Ye ,"
Tourist-"Will you tell me when the
next eruption will occur" -Fliegende
Batter.
DUSTY RHoDEs-"Madam, would ID
be too much to ask for half loaf3'"
Mrs. Dogood "You strike me as be-
ing over half a loafer. Kate Fields
Washington.
JACK-"Pa, is gent an abbrevia~
ton for gentleman" Pa-"No; it's.
generally an exaggeration Of all his
faults with an Authorization of his
virtues Vogue.
THERE is nothing like bottle OF;
whisky in the cellar to make man,
thoughtful for the comfort of his wife
when the coalhod is empty. -Bjny~
hamton Republican.
THE Dowager Queen of Portugal
has one dress whose train is six yards
in length. She ought to have a gang
Of Western rustlers hold it up
Philadelphia Ledger.
BILLINGs-"Ah!. Society turkey
to-day, eh?" Mrs. Hashcroft-"Why.
what do you mean, Mr.. Billings"
Billings-"The dressing is the bes t
part of it. Indianapolis Journal.
FULLER, Hail, and Clark are
rivals" CLARK is looking happy.
Has he gained ground?" "Yes-tbat
is, he has Just persuaded the girl to
marry Hall. kate Fields Washing
ton.
JuDGE-"You are clearly guilty.,
prisoner Ten dollars or ten days. ;"
Prsoner-"I'll take the ten days It's,
the softest snap I've had yet. A dol
lar day is big sayin' for me. "-Har-
per's Bazaar.
"IT always pays man in my busi.
ness to take plenty Of time" mur-
INJURED the burglar softly to himself,
gently dumping the third tray OF
gold watches into his capacious bag
Buffalo Courier.
The time is now at hand when
Johnny-boy will say that it's alto
gether too cold for him to make a
"Trip TO the woodpile, and then go
straight out and build a snow fort
Washington Star !
No FALSE MODE Sly. -Lady-" This
is the second time you have req -
food from me isn't it," Tram s 40
is. madam: and you are at liberty TO
mention the fact to your friends il
you wish Puck.
I'M asin this labor agitation. .
said Meandering Mike. som. ],
said Flooding Pete. Every time L
run up agin piece of work | git SO
agitated I purity near have heart dis,
ease. American Industries.
CoKE-"I see where young john
-on, arrested on suspicion, refused a
awyer and made an admirable de-
Tense. They tell me he did finely. p
Littleton-"Yes; he acquitted him1
self very well indeed Puck.
TIMID PAsToR-"Is the editor OF
the Daily Hustler in?" Office Boy
"Yessir." Timid Pastor-"Is he
er--approachable?" Office Boy
"Yessir, if yeh got tn Doodle. Wnh
office are web after?"-Good News