The weekly tribune. [volume] (Great Falls, Mont.) 1891-1894, 1893-06-23
A-GOLD BRICK TRICK.
IN THE ASSAY OFFICE THE PEOPLE
HAD LOADS OF FUN.

Bank CLERKS Who Knew 1t All.
What a jay he looked The hayseed
was dropping Il Of his pockets, and his
unkempt whiskers were sporting with
the wind as he marched into the United
States assay Office in Wall street and de-
posted upon "a desk a big carpet bag,
which he set down with a resounding
bang. All the clerks stood around and
grinned. 1t was the old story.
"Mr Assay Man," he said, II have
here a gold brick that p
But he was interrupted with q roar of
laughter. A young man i'll a corner
nearly rolled on the floor with merri-
ment. A bankers clerk who had come
in to inquire about a gold shipment gig
gled till he was crimson.
Sucker born every minute" he said.
Same old yarn. You jayhawkers
wouldn't get taken in so often if you
read the papers, Oh. Lord. what a fool
you must be!'
The old man looked puzzled. IF yon
will kindly talk English" he remarked,
you and | will be able to understand
each other better, What do you mean
by calling me II fool"
Precisely what | say" spoke up the
bankers clerk. You've been taken in
by the gold brick swindle."
''Swindle, eh?'
Eyes. swindle. You met a man from
California. didn't you, who had a gold
brick tied up i'll a red handkerchief and
an Indian with him? Man said the brick
was worth $1,000, and he'd sell it for
$4,000, didn't heT'
He did"
''Oh. what u lark" laughed the bank
er's clerk, aud every one in the Office was
on Il broad grin at the mystiication of
1 the iayhawker The Californian said
the Indian knew where there were IA lot
more gold bricks and they've gone to get
them And then they sold yon a lump
of lead covered with gold paint that is
worth about $i.G5. and you've come down
mere to the United States assay Office to
nave the lead analysed and get told what
a monkey you've made of yourself" And
every one howled with mirth.
Not 50 fast. young man." objected
the Jayhawker You were right about
the Californian and the redskin selling
me the gold brick, but there your infor-
nation ceased. "Tain't no bit Of lead they
worked off On me. lhada chipof itana-
lyzed. No, Sir. | want born yesterday
if | am from the country"
You had it assaycd!' burst cut the
bankers clerk, almost exploding with
the intensity of his grin. You knocked
a corner off the brick, and then they
changed it on you, substituting a piece
of real gold cut from a So goidpicce.
That of course was found to be all right.
and they landed you like an old guy.
high and dry" Laughter.
No, they didn't" protested the jay
hawker I've got the genuine thing.
I'll bet you $500 it's a real gold brick"
And he pulled out the sum of money
named and threw it on the table.
There were cries Of Don't take the
poor old chump's money. He's been done
once" and, ""Iain't fair to bet on a sure
thing. The layhawker, however, pro-
tested.
I'm rich" he said. I've got Il lot
more money I'm going to spend on gold
bricks. and il any one can fool me | want
to know it. I'd like to take IL fiier on it
anyway
The bankers clerk hardly liked 70
cheat the iayhawker. but all the rest said
that the lesson would be worth $500 to
the old fellow
IN make the bet without looking I'd
the brick. said the bankers clerk. ''The
terms Of it are that you've been fooled
and that you've bought a lump of lead
OF something. Money talks. Here's
mine, and he threw $500 on the table.
There were some moral scruples in the
minds OF the crowd about doing" the
old man ND IN that wav, hut the major
ity view was that he deserved it for be-
ing so fresh.
The mouey being deposited, the iav-
hawker slowly unpacked his carpet bag
in the presence of Il broad prin. There
were derisive cheers as he took the gold
brick from the many coverings he had
wound around it and handed it 20 the as
II