The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-08-06
CURlOSlTIES OF THE NAIL
Which Are on Exhibition at The
Worlds Fair.
The Dead Letter Office Has Sent Many
Interesting Things to the Feir-one
is Love Letter Written on a Pine
Board and Another is a Box of
Horned Toads That Are Still Alive.

Board and Another Is a Box Of
Horned Toads That Are Still Alive.
From the Philadelphia Press.
The letter that never came is at tho
worlds fair. 1t is numbered 500 and is
displayed in one of the big glass cases
that contain the museum of curiOsities
from the dead letter office II was writ
ten in a large copybook hand on a smooth
pine board so that he who runs may read
Hundreds do read it every day; some
scream over it, some giggle, others look
sardOnic as if they took bitter pleasure
in finding some one who was a bigger
idiot than they had ever been not a few
smile sympathetically but furtively, with
a companion, as if afraid of being caught
at it, and some sneer and make contempt-
uOus remarks. But not one is wholly in
different to it,
This is because it is a love letter; and
the fact that it is a love letter is one
reason why it never reached its destina-
ton. Love is not only blind, but IL is
also absent minded. Orlando wrote some
deliriOus verses and nailed them TO trees,
trusting to luck for them to catch his
sWeetheart's eve. The modern lover be-
gins his letter with a rhapsody and ends
it with a vow. Then he seals it with
kisses and forgets to put an address on it.
So it was with Dick when he wrote
this letter on a pine board to Hattie in
consequence of a lovers quarrel.
There is the letter It's good, honest
letter and has all the matrimonial ear
marks on it. The writer doesn't brag
that he is much to look at, but reminds
her that ne has the lucre. If these two,
drifted apart, it was because all Uncle
Sans horses and all of his men couldn't
find out who Hattie or Dick was, or where
either of them lived.
/ have dwelt upon this because of the
universal interest in love story, even If
it is continued in our next and we fail
to get the next But without doubt Hat
tie and Dick have made it all up or been
cOnsoled by others. But what balm is
there in Gilead for the lady whose false
teeth never came?
In this museum of curiOsities is dain-
ty little set of teeth, with gold clamps to
fasten them, and half dozen other sets
that look as CHASTITY as grinning skulls.
BY the side of them is a PAIR of dentists
fOrCeps, n razor and little dried, brown
mummified human ear. The proximity of
the two latter is startlingly suggestive of
a rash man who told q barber that his
conversation was not edifying. The bar
Der had only to fill his customers mouth
and eyes with lather, then slice off his
ear and send that, with the razor, to him
as souvenirs of their difference of opin-
ion
Now, in her maiestys dominions, where
she parcel post takes the place of the ex-
press companies, special messengers and
delivery wagons, such a conglomerate lot
pf 70 mo-
you can have butter from the country
dairy delivered in the post before break
fast, your new bonnet in time for gar
den party, and your canary from the
bird store by night But over here more
things are forbidden the mail bag by
Uncle Sam than are denied the faith full
in the Koran. Yet people put candy,
plum pudding, canned fruits, eggs, maple
sugar, dead snakes and live toads in the
post box.
Some of these things have got to tho
dead letter Office. There is now in the
collection at the fair a glass box of horn
ed toads that are still alive. Heaven or
Postmaster General Bissen alone knows
what they live on. Perhaps on statistics,
for their tiny, black beads of eyes are
fixed upon little old book labeled ''Ben-
iamin Franklin's Record of Vaiuables in
the Dead Letter Office from 1777 to 1888 -
1t is impossible to make out what this Gu
rious record of a hundred years ago con-
tains, but it could scarcely have been as
unique a list as that of to-day, for the
post office was not then the systematized
department it is now,l nOtlso trustworthy
and far more expensive.
In these two cases q boy could learn a
good many curious things in natural his
tory. He could study a rattlesnake at
short range and count the rattles; learn
how various birds build their nests and
the variety of eggs they lay, look at dead
lizards and baby alligators, boxes of min
eral ores and crystals, mounted butter
flies and dried flowers, mud turtles and
stuffed birds, silkworms, human skull
and a basket of mushrooms.
Here are q large number of bills, rang
ing from the old shinplaster Of ante bel
lum days to 500 bank notes and silver
certificates. There are also stamps,
coins and medals for objections and vari-
Gus ethnOlOgic curiOs, such as heather
gods carved in ivory, Indian bead work
in mOcCasns, baskets and wampums,
Chinese golden lilies, of high caste celes-
Uial ladies, sombrero trimmed with
feathers, beads and seQuins.
A red ear of corn is without doubt an
other love letter that never reached its
destination. 1t looks rather idiotic here,
but il was doubtless intended to convey
the same message it brought to the maid
ems who harvested the maize ear IN Hi
awatha. And here is another object that
presents the Indian question as it appears
to the pOstOtfice department. II is mail
pouch with a placard that relates the
story of a star route martyrdom.
S. NJ. Peterson, mail carrier between
two points in Arizona, was murdered by
band of Apaches. The mail was all de-
stroyed and the empty bag
picked up near the place
where the tragedy occurred. II has q
grewsOme interest and makes us remem-
Der the devoted servants of the govern
ment who have gone to their death in the
discharge of duty. In the light of this
the people who amuse themselves by
writing letters on griddle cake turner's,
brickbats, collars and cuffs and pine
shingles seem to need visit from the
fool killer.
Boxes of cartridges, packages of fire
crackers, mechanical toys, raisins, Chi
nese laundry bills, Chris tmas cards, dolls,
a masquerade suit made out of a deck of
cards pasted on black calico, cigars and
tobacco, pine cones, harness and canned
salmon, all find a place here. A ball
players wire mask repOses on a set of
doll bed springs, door knocker of bronze
hobnobs with a lemonade shaker, an AK
forms a pedestal for a mouse trap, skates
and corn peppers, whisky TASKS and ma
chine oil cans, a masonic apron and an
anti-macassar, all lie down or are hung
up together.
The hair of Charles Guiteau lies beside