The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1893-09-15
THINGS WISE AND OTHERWISE.

got into al argument with young
lady on the subject of women'l
rights. Finally the lady sai1 "Can.
didly, sir, why do you oppose giving
the franchise to women ?'' lyon
will excuse me for saying il, mad.
am" he replied, "but / have not
sufficient confidence in their capaci.
ty to conduct government affairs. >
"But what evidence of woman's men.
tai inferiority to man can you ad.
vance 7" persisted the lady. The
bachelor thought moment, and
then answered slowly ga simple
fact is enough to satisfy my mild,
and that Is the frightful way in
which they do up their back hair"
The Height of Optimism Sixty
years ago when the common people in
Connecticut began iocking to hear
the Uniyersalist preachers, an old
deacon one evening at prayer meet
ing spoke thus "Brethering, we
have heerd a strange doctrine preach
ed in these parts lately, that all men
are finally to be saved but, breth-
ering, we hope for better things"
Society Item Mrs. BilIus had
heard no sounds from the barn for
some minutes, and her motherly in-
stinct told her something was wrong.
"What are you doing ont there,
boys :" she called. "We're holding
a little social function, mamma" an
swered Johnny. And the next in
slant the back door of the barn was
cautiously opened and a large yellow
dog with a tin can tied to his tail
darted out and ran with the utmost
earnestness and vociferation down
the alley.-Chicago Tribune.
Caller BE hiyins, Finnegan, we've
got full purity airly in the day. Fin
negan-Yes | wanted a bottle to
get some medicine in, an implied me
whisky bottle, an now / fale so much
betther / don't want tn medicine. .
Puck.
Assistant-Who is this Professor
Smith that is to speak at the banquet
this evening? City Editor-Don'tI
know; Just refer to him as the 'well-
known Professor Smith. ."-lay-
mond's Monthly.
A Definition VIII Askit-How
would you describe cynicl Phil
0Sfer-A cynic is man who has an
unreciprocated affection for himself.
Puck.
A Kindness II did your book
good turn in last weeks papcr,' said
the Critic to the Author. s'Indeed 70
said the Author. "Yes," returned
the Critic, II didn't mention it,
Puck.
Ambiguity: Slabs (the marble
cutter)-lIave YOU selected an epi-
taph, Mrs. Ketchum ? Mrs. Ketch-
um (relict of the Hon. Sharp Ketch-
um)-Would not "IIere lies lawyer
and an honest man" tell the whole
story, Mr.. Slabs? Slabs-Not clear
Pm afraid. Strangers would |
be apt to imagine that there were
two men buried in one graye.-Puck.
She Was Interested "They have
been holding an election in Germa-
ny," observed Mr.. Larimer, as he
looked up from his paper. "Indeed"
replied his wife, with u tone Of deep |
interest. "And was Emperor Viii
lam reelected ?"-Pittsburg Chron-
Gle.
MIR. Stingy-Your horse is always
surning his head and looking back.
Why does be do that? Cabby-I US
lally smoke when | am driving and
ny horse looks around every once in
! while to see If you amt going to
give me a cigar.-Texas Siftings.
Her Father-Whatl You-you
marry my daughter ! Bertie-Yeth,
Why not? You don't know anything
against her, do you ?
A British Opinion Of Americans.
All the world knows that they are
4 humourous people. They are as
,onspicuonsly the purveYors Of hu-
nour to the nineteenth century as
The French were the puryeyors of wit
10 the eighteenth. Nor is this sense
,f the ludicrous side of things con-
ined to a few brilliant writers. 1t is
iiffused among the whole people
it colours their ordinary life, and
ziyes TO their talk that distinctively
new favour which European palate
enjoys. Their capacity for enjoying
! joke against themselves was oddly
Illustrated at the outset of the civil
var, time Of stern excitement, by
he merriment which arose over the
lasty retreat of the Federal troops at
he battle of Bull Run. When
Tweed was robbing New York, and
lad set on the henchmen who we're
openly prcstituting justice, the citi-
ems found the situation so amusing
hat they almost forgot to be angry.
Much Of president Lincoln's popular
tv and much also OF the gift he
howed for restoring confidence to
he north at the darkest moments Of
he war, was due to the humorous
ray he used to turn things, convey
ng the impression Of not being him
of} nnoaev even when he was most /,