The Indianapolis journal. [volume] (Indianapolis [Ind.]) 1867-1904, 1893-11-12
SOME SHORT STORIES
Brief Tales and Incidents Picked
Up About the City.
An Unappreciated Dog-Had the Wrong
Animal in Mind-An Embarrass-
ing misunderstanding.

Some dogs are appreciated and some, alas.
are not. The different lot of two CANNES
in the eastern part of town is watched with
interest by the suffering neighbors. One is
a little black terrier, whose greatest ac-
complishment is a shrill yelp intended for
q bark. The other is a noble hunter, with
a soft brown and white coat and big. INTEL
Hgent eyes. The household where the black
terrier holds sway was recently alarmed to
discover that the little fellow seemed quite
sp~iritless, forgot TO bark, and lay on the
rug stretching and signing feebly. AS the
days went by he displayed all the symptoms
Of typhoid fever, of which there was q case
next door. A doctor was called i'm and pro-
nounced it the real thing. So now the little
black dog is being nursed and petted back
to health with as much care as If he were
a child. The owner Of the other dog Is
a busy man, and has no time to go hunt
ing; besides, he is already in possession of
two other dogs; so he decided to part with
his hunter. He made up his mind to give
him to a man who lived several miles on
the other side of the city, and spent.on
afternoon taking his gift over to the friends
house. The next morning, when he opened
his front door, in walked the faithful hunt
er, looking for all the world as IL he ex-
pected a welcome. But his owner was not
to be so easily baked. Taking the dog. he
walked TO the station and put him in charge
of a friendly conductor on a through train
to Richmond, with Instructions not TO LET
him escape. A month went by and the
family concluded that they had at last got
ten rid of the dog, when one day the head
of the house. standing on his front porch.
saw a thin, worn-out brown dog come trot-
ting up the walk. The dog gave a bark Of
JOY as ne caught sight of his master. who
ea1ru on Gim IN amazement, then ex-
you back?' The Intelligent animal narsed
when ne heard these unappreciative words.
around the house. No amount of coaxine
can persuade him to pay any attention to
lavishes his affection on the LADY OF the
house; who profted by the example and re-
ceived the wanderer more kindly.
- o.
"A lady living on North Illinois street was
amused the other morning when, in an
swer TO the bell, she opened her front door
and was saluted with a profound bow from
a small-sized boy on the doorstep, and the
inquiry of Excuse me-, but have you any
garbage this morning?" Upon being in
formed that the garbage was burned in the
stove crematory, the polite garbage gentle
man lifted his battered hat, and, with a
dignifed Good morning, madam" disap-
peared down the alley.
WAAC duui CSScS OI some OF the ladies' of
the Sanitary Association, in the weekly
meetings at the Propylaeum. are ; some
umeS quite as amusing as they are in
struct1Ve. One member rose at a recent
meetdng, and after a vivid description of
most with tears of a nearsighted guest
from another city who had been visiting
Her, ana declared that when she took her
friend out TO drive she wished her blind
instead or only nearsighted, so that she
nIgnt not see the condition of the streets.
AUOIner SDn1 kPT whose Ian O11a Oa xra g Cr1ff
emphatic, repeatedly declared that the sole
cause of the trouble was that Indianapolis
DIDN'T have enough "kickahs." In other
towns, when things went wrong, the "kick-
abs came forward and effected a change.
Two Of the MEMBERS of the board of man
ayers of the association drove out TO the
south Side on an exploring expedition to
the Fifteenth ward, and. TO their surprise.
discovered that many of the housewives of
that justly famous locality had never heard
OF the Sanitary Association. One good col
ored woman evidently didn't quite compre-
bend the nature of the associations work,
ana pet1ttoned the astonished ladies to re-
move a half-witted darkey from the neigh
convinced but that the boy could be classed
along with other rubbish" and thus be
conveniently disposed of.
In these fin de steele times, when a great
deal of our everyday conversation is car
ried on by means of slang expressions,
1t behooves every one to DE conyersant
with the most ordinary "argot." An ig-
norance of the latter often leads one into
embarrassing predicaments. as the follow
ing story illustrates:
Dr. D and wife were the guests OF DR..
F. and wife in the little Hoosier town of
B, as was also Prof. X of WASH
Huston. Dr. D was so exceedingly deaf
that, although he was very intelligent. a
lew moments conversation with him be-
came extremely monotonous. Prof. k
and a brother-in-Iaw Of the host, a young
f. man of twenty-three, on the pretext of a
Doctor. Returning an hour later eTea the Proe
lessor hung his hat upon the rack in the
nal, remarking to his companion: Hang
up your speaking trumpet" which, being
interpreted. means Hang u your hat"
and Is a wheel within a wheel, having its
through dis hat" The Doctors wife was
IN an adjoining room, heard the remark.
ana. not being well versed in the Ian
snage of the Masses" at once took UNI
DraSe at it, as she supposed the remark
aPPp p to her husband, who happened to be
but is was some time before the lady was
PrOpitlated. and even yet there exists a
marked coolness between them. 1t will be
unnecessary 70 add that the Professor has
Ioresworn the use Of slang.
An indianapolis girl, who spent last win
ter abroad studying music, relates an
amusing incident of her experience with one
or the teachers. He was a young Italian
"hC ebiSC RAC1C4 HI IA AC4lC
IRA and with whose charms all the girls
aHected to be terribly ~sniitten. They
called him Romeo behind his back, and de-
clared that with his jet black eyes and
curly hair he would be a perfect Apollo
II he were only taller, as it was he was
q perfect little beauty" 1t was q day or
TWO before the Christmas holidays and our
young lady had just finished n lesson
W'th him, Their conversations had always
neen very limited, as he knew but little
English and never seemed disposed 10 air
mat; so, blushing at her boldness. she
turned, at the door. and said: II wish you
a merry Christmas" He looked at her for
q moment as If he thought her crazy
and then bowling deeply, said: at is
a great honor you do, but ] cannot marry
You Christmas: no, no. do not ask IT," The
Door girl was dreadfully embarrassed and
repeated what she had said several times
with an emphasis that caused Romeo to
become more alarmed and decided in his
refusal. Il do not want 10 marry you
christmas, or ever" he protested. When
bis now thoroughly indignant pupil at
length made him understand that she meant
happy Christmas" he was greatly dis
tressed at his mistake and was profuse in
his bows and apologies.
n young man who went to the fair rather
early in the season has a story which he
tells on himself with evident relish. He