Grand Rapids herald. [volume] (Grand Rapids, Mich.) 1892-1959, 1893-01-02


covered a aaw concealed in his moral
character. And so. this very after
noon. az he sat idly scribbling on a
sheet Of that fine. expensive paper
which he uses for his writings-iu order
that the statiOner at least NAV have an
interest in them-he put down these
words: II will never lie 10 my wife
again" That is how / came into ex-
istence.
just then his wife approached with
the intention OF telling him story
Those people are as uninteresting as if
Howells and not nature had created
them; but the story was TO be in three
volumes, with an appendix and copious
notes, because she thought that he was
at work and wished To assist hia, a
any other woman would Also, she
looked over his shoulder, so that il he
happened to be writing anything he
would immediately be Disguised with 1t
and not be able 10 finish 1t before rent
day. But he had already folded me up;
and now he thrust me into his pocket.
saying: That goes for one year. If
cannot be great, at least l viii be &C.
centric" Well. he seems TO be in earn
est; but I would no. bet dollar that
am alive tomorrow.
January Al may have a chance
for my lie. Fielding isn't much of
a family liar, as liars go in New
York lie IL a man who would brush
the chalk dust of his clothes very
carefully after be had been play
ing billiards, but unless his wife asked
him he would not tell her that business
had detained him down town. Compar-
atively speaking, call that truthful
ness On the whole. he is n fair sample
Of the husband made up out Of Aracri-
can goods which. while they are de-
fcicnt ia style. will wear better on the
average patience. In the matter OF
lying, 10 il true that the foreigner Is
not so inventive as the American
While your slow-going European il
grinding out a single lie your srcart
New Yorker win get up three: but
whereas the New Yorker Will tell his
three lies % one wife, the foreigner
vii make his ono liz do for four. some
~ then in Berlin, perhaps. and others
in Ho5oSen. so that ne ~Ill b. still one
point ahead In the estimation % the
father 81 les, NSich shows that thrift
g. better than O vivid ima yinatiou.
Hat I tARress Fielding did not come
home - dinner this evening When he
cane in. about ten o'clock. he was
ehcwtDg a new kind OF gum which i'm
parts an unacceptable flavor % n
mans explanations. lie said that il
Vas good for the digestion. Well. SO IL
Is. IN enables man to digest n wine
supper wi,hout causing his wife any
pain do not call that lie. Msude
ssid IL WAS pity that man should
spend one dollar for dinner at a res
taursnt when there was a good one
Whiting for him at home. But. my
dear said he. Il took very cheap
dinner It cost ne only ten cents.
am not going 70 spend any more money
unnecessarily" lie stated the exact
facts about the dinner. 70 was very
cheap. though abounding In luxury
We shook dice for it with Tom Freeman
and stuck him. His only expense was
ten cents for the waiter re he gets
caught for the next one that will not be
spending money unnecessarily. He
simply viii have 70 spend it IL the dice
run against him.
January s-"Iowdv. who is that7~
Msude is holding mp photograph about
the size OF four postage stamps A
charming face it Is. though nobody
~ould think 50 who judged By
The way is affects you. Maude.
She i younger than you. IL
was By several years when that little
camera caught her prettiness Come.
HCwdy, tNik right up ike man Who
h she9 AMI Why have you her picture
I'm your vest pocket. my sonP
'Oh. | don't lsnow says Howdy. II
fo.xot IL was there
That's the truth. AZ least. n Won
hasn's forgotten it- Il vouldn't De there.
Not On yOur life. You know that Nsude
slwaSs goes through your pockets.