Grant County herald. [volume] (Lancaster, Wis.) 1850-1968, 1893-07-06
Preston.

Preston.
Yes. Mr.. stroller" we are busy
writing about the Fair (the MELONS will
take care of themselvesl and our chief
aim now is 10 have all Grant County's
pious christians there in September to
attend the Worlds Congress Auxiliary,
which is to be composed of delegates
from all parts of the globe. representa-
tive of all religions and creeds. The
test of the membership Is to be the
beliefin God. None are excluded ex-
cept men Of science or others who
incline TO investigate before believing.
We are sure our people Will be amused
at the comparison of views upon the
religions of the world, and which will
prove TO be more beneficial 10 their line
of knowledge than two years at a theo-
logical seminary. Each delegate will
speak in his own language. being as
sured that his thoughts will be faithfully
represented in print in all the languages
inflicted upon mankind by onr Great
Father, at the unfortunate confusion of
tongues.
The more solemn and formal exer.
eises will be likely to open by Rev. DIR.
Swallow-all (methodist) in which he
will likely confess that many things are
not so clear to the human mind as they
might be,yet it forms no obstacle to our
relentless faith, and probably will thank
God that he, by earthly ministers, did
so skillfully conceal from mankind for
some five or nix hundred years, the
rotundity of the earth, and that he did
make first the fact known to that pious
and eminent man. Columbus, &c. After
which the exercises will be continued
by singing the Missionary hymn.
From Greenland's Icy Mountains, E"
accompanied by the lofty organ which
will thrill all hearts with worshipful
reverence. As there are to be many
hundred delegates they will make their
address in regular order, probably next
DR.. Idolster, of Hlndoostan will state
the different things they worship,
among which the sacred cow, and will
commend his God system as the only
true one to be found on the globe, and
will promise to see that sufficient
number of missionaries are sent to
America to initiate all its people INTO
the sacred mysteries of their only true
religion. Next in order Dr. Ben Israel,
of Judea, likely his system will be that
the only holy word is the Old Tesla
ment, all others are spurious, and that
Jehovah becme disguised at the Fall of
Adm-wel we can guess at the rest.
Next introduced will be DR. Elect
(Presbyterian) of Baltimore, who of
course, will condemn the jew as the
Jew did Idolitor, as not being superior,
and goes on about few Father, Son
and Holy Ghostly contrivances, saving
he was interested in the address from
the gentlemen from Hindoostan, COM
plimenting him very likely, in his own
sublime faith, hoping that he may stay
here, &c. The parliament will next
have the pleasure of listening TO Rev.
Keehaty, of Spain, who is very likely
to speak with considerable stress on the
multitude of scientists who like mos
quitoes, swarm about them, and that
science in the Golden Era of the church
was regarded as a sin, and is no less so
now, and that the average man will not
tear things 10 pieces to see what they
are made of when it is far easier TO
swal ow them whole and that the great
fish set a most pious example which
good NEIL of all ages have not hesitated
to follow. He surely will tell us TO not
kill the goose that lays the golden egg
and to not reduce the stock of impeni-
tents too low as they are useful for
revenue and doubtless appointed by
God for that purpose. Faith is desirable
but coin yields better to the general
prosperity of the church. &c, and after
extending the apostolic benediction
next will come in regular order Mr..
State Church, of London; Mr.. Origin. of
Tartar; Abon Ben Mucheyife, of Con-
stanlioeople; Rev. DR.. LeLung. of Pekin;
Rev. Winged (Unitarian,) of Boston
After few remarks from Mr.. Winged
the archbishop from Delaware will call
him to order on the grounds that he
will likely undertake to make plan his
proofs, and that his remarks are her.
tical and will cause high commotion
and TO prove his truth would be
Treason TO the King of Kings" After
an informal ballot is cast during which
time the organist will play an old
anthem: "Auld Lang Syne,n SHOULD
OIu acquaintance NC forgot, ana we
want to look out that Joss don't get
"chosee'' by ''aeclamation" if he don't
look out for Mahomet
Rev. Abennigger, from Congo, will
likely pronounce the benediction in the
name Of all the gods at once. The
speaker will arise and say the resolution
is adopted for 100 years 10 reconvene at
this place. The organ will peal Nearer
My God to Thee as the delegates pass
out. Let everybody 60 TO the Worlds
Fair in Sept STENo.