Vermont phÅ“nix. [volume] (Brattleboro, Vt.) 1834-1955, 1893-01-20
That Shopping old PIG.

Farmer George Parker and Farmer Ben
Parker are neghbors in the Barley Run set
Element, Pennsylvania. They are not relat-
ed. Farmer Ben is a good-natured, easy
going citizen, and Farmer George is in
clincd to be a little crlisty and hard to
suit Poland China pigs seem to be the
favorite breed for pork with the Barley
Run farmers, and Farmer George Parker
always raises one of these pigs to kill for
his own family use. SO does Farmer Ben
Parker. There has never been any restric-
ton placed on the running at large of any
ones pigs in that locality, but lately Farm
er Ben's big Poland China got to be such
nuisance around his premises, Farmer
George said, that he went to Farmer Ben
one day last week and told him to shut his
pig up.
"If you don't" said Farmer George,
"and he comes snoopin' around my place
again, III put bullet through him and
throw his carcass into your yard"
Farmer Ben didn't say much, and his
neghbor went home and shut his own pig
up in its pen so nobody could complain of
him if the worst came to the worst That
same night Farmer George heard a noise
out in his orchard, and went out to see
what was up.
"By Jinks :" said he, there's that blame
snoopin' old black hog o Ben Parker's
again, III fix him'
He went into the house and got his rifle,
and shot the trespassing hog dead in his
tracks Then he got his hired man, load
ed the pig on to a stone dray and hauled it
up to Farmer Bens. He and the hired
man tumbled the carcass over into the
yard, and the noise they made brought
Farmer Ben to the door.
whats up there?" he hollered.
"Nothn's up" replied Farmer George.
"But something's down, and it's your
blamed snoopin' old pig! I've tumbled his
carcass into your yard, and | told you I'd
do it,"
Then Farmer George and his hired man
went home and went to bed. Next morn
ing the hired man went out to feed the pig
and returned to the house with the news
that the pig had broken out of the pen.
"Go hunt him up!' said Farmer George.
"If he gets around Ben Parker's it'll be
Jest like Ben to knock him overt
SO the hired man went out to hunt up
the pig. BY and by he came back.
Cant find him." said he. "But, say,
Ben Parker's snoopn' old pig is gruntn'
round in his pen up yender, as big as lifen'
Farmer George grabbed his hat and
rushed Gut of the house. He went straight
to the pig-pen. Then he went from there
straight to the orchard, because a pig s
track led from the pen right in that direc-
ton. And the pigs track ended exactly
where Farmer George had shot Farmer
Ben's shopping black pig the day before.
But Farmer George didn't tarry long in the
orchard.
II wish you could seen his coat tails
as he tore up lords Ben Parkersi" says
the hired man. "They'd carried pitch
er of milk on 'em, sure as guns, and never
split DROP"
Farmer George got to Farmer Ben's all
out of breath. Farmer Ben stood by his
pig-pen, smoking his pipe, and, sure
enough, in the pen was Ben's pig, grIlnt-
ing contentedly.
"Ben!" exclaimed Farmer George,
"where' at-OnfortAit--pig-o mine?'
"Huh?' said Ben, grinning all over his
face.
Where s-the-pig-I tumbled-over
your-fence-last night?" gasped Farmer
George. "He's-mine!"
"Yourn! said Ben, grinning more and
more. "Why, you said it was that snoop-
in old pig O mine!"
'But it-wasn't" said Farmer George.
Where is hep
"Why," grinned Ben, ''he's all cut up
and ready to pickler
Farmer George glared and breathed hard
for a few seconds, and then turned and
made for home as fast as he had left it.
Farmer Ben took his pipe out of his
mouth and shouted after his retreating
neighbor;
"Say, George! Come up an I'll give
you a fryin' o sassage meat. They say
snoopin' old black pigs makes the primest
kind"
But up to date Farmer George hasn't
sent for any sausage meat, and it will not
go well with any one who mentions snoop.
in old pigs around the George Parker farm
-Ne,o York Sun.