The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1893-02-18
PuNeENr PARAoRApAs.

--"What maiScs you wait for ths
,hangc before you select your gloves?"
because there may be some new style
before it gets back. Inter Ocean.
The Opening Night-Dolly Bron-
.on enthusiastically y)--"You take the
premium for splendid seats" Cheviot
Hill (sadly)-"No; the spectator does,
though" Kate Fields Washington.
There is one thing | dread" re.
marked Johnson, "and that is a prema-
sure burial" 'Don't worry about that"
replied Brown; "The thing is impossi-
BILE; there's no danger of your being
buried too soon"
The Cat Was Out -Clara--"I guess
Mary Goods cat is dead. She hasn't
had a scratch on her face this month"
Mamie-"That isn't the reason. Her
intended has ceased wearing his scarf
pin. "-Jeweler's Weekly.
The Pessimist-''Things never does
go right in this world" said the pessi-
mistc hired man. "Bobwire fences
didn't come in nntil leather pants had
gone out O. style. e."-Indianapolis Jour.
nal.
"The commencement of this novel is
dreadfully slow" ITO "companion')-
"Miss Broclthardt will you please read
the first two or three chapters, and
will then start where you have left off"
Captain Fracassa.
PLEASE, sir it was 9:O2 when you
got here. When we're late you always
keep us after school," said the smart
boy Every we'll" said the school
master; you can all stay and keep me
after school, if you wish boston
Globe
The Footlights Would Trouble Her.
Manager (to Cnicago Girl )-"You are
pretty in the face, well formed in body
and limbs but it wouldn't do for you
to appear on the stage Would-be
Actress-"Nhat would be the trouble?'
'"The footlights. Yankee Blade.
-She-"Do you believe ones fate can
be read in the hand as the palmistry
people say?" He-"To a certain ex-
tent Give me your hand, for instance,
and can tell that my fate will be sure
to be happy one. Chicago News
AT the Breakfast Table Father tc
little Martha, who has been naughty
81 know a little girl who wasn't good
this morning" Martha-"Ah!" Father
You know the little girl, too"
Martha-"Bah!' Father-"Can you
tell me her name?" Martha-"L Little
children mustn't talk at table. Paris
Figaro.
Hello" said one department clerk
to another, here's another joke about
woman staying in a dry goods store
for two hours and not buying any
thing" YES" was the reply; those
are very good jokes usually, but when
you get married you won't take much
stock in them. ."-Washington Star.
-Binks-"Did you hear about Wat.
sons whiskers?" Jinks-"No; what
was it?" Binks-"Why, they looked
so homely that all the neighbors signed
petition asking Watson, as matter
of public policy, to shave them off. "
Jinlis-"Well, did he do it?" BinlSs--
Eyes; he did it" Jinks-"Well, what
then?" Binks-"Why, the very next
day the neighbors signed petition
asking Watson, as matter of public
policy, to let them grow again. -
Somerville Journal
Landlord Good morning, sir
hope you enjoyed a good nights rest,
sir?" Traveler-"Yes, thanks; pretty
fair." Landlord-''Saw nothing of the
ghost that is said to appear from time
to time in the room you Occupied?'
Traveler-"Ah, yes; | did, though
Landlord-"And how did you get rid OF
the intrudcr?" Traveler-'I offered
him glass of your wine, when he van.
ished with gesture of supreme dis
gust" Landlord-"Oh! All! Well,
neverr-Familien- -Wochenblatt