The times. (Owosso, Mich.) 1882-1897, 1893-02-10
The Weather on Weatherwax

The Icy weather of late has occasioned a
great many accidents, particularly among
old people.
Old Mr.. Weatherwax slipped and fell by
his own gate on his return from the post
Office the other evening and received a severe
out temporary injury TO his brain, by
striking on the back of his head and pro-
ducing what is known as eoncussion of that
important organ.
How long he Jay there no one knows, but
when found by one of the neighbors he was
cold and insensible. He was carried into
the house and placed upon a lounge, with
warm applications around him. When he
revived somewhat and one of the by-standers
said he ought to have some whiskey, and
the thlng was 70 sooner SAID than someone
produced supply and began dosing the old
man with it at short intervals.
This sort of procedure began to tell on
the Old man after little and he turned
over on his side, kicked the flat-irons away
from his feet, threw back the cOverlet and
raising his head he stared at the faces about
the room moment, and happening to see
the Old lady he inquired with a somewhat
thickened utterance as he dropped back Oh
the pillow, ''Whaz mazzer, Harriet"
why, you fell on the ice and got ter
ribly hurt, poor man." said the old lady,
fastening to his side"
''Did eh? Who told you SOP" inquired the
Old man, who was ignorant of the whole
affair.
''Why, Mr.. Slinkenslog found you and
brought you indoors or you would have
frozen to DEATH"
That's another!" said the old man as he
glared at the old lady. "Go get your kitty
chasm and read what that says bout lyin'."
but you did, dear, and you got an awful
hurt and must keep still now"
'Umph! guess know whether l Slip
ped down or not. You take me for
blasted idiot? Somebody here has been
drinking. can smell 'em," continued the
old man as he looked over the group.
'''Why Josiah, it's your own breath. We
had To-"
"Harrietw interrupted the old man sharply,
''you have got Saphira disposition tackled
onto you that would be prize to a pack
peddler. haven't touched drop of liquor"
but we had to, in order to save your
life, Josiah, when you were lnsensibe, give
you some liquor"
Ibid eh? Then you admit that you have
been pourin' whiskey down me when |
didn't know ii? You want an excuse to
send me off to the Jag works l s'pose, so you
can prance around and be proud of itP Well
you can't do it, dye hear that?" continued
the old man as he rose to sitting posture.
''Why Josiah" explained the old lady, sit
did seem as tho something ought to be done
for YOU"
'Did eh? So you went to pourn' whiskey
down me without my knowledge or consent.
You must be born posse of fools. Why,
you'd intoXicate stone statue of the god
dess of liberty in that way if you happened
to catch one out on cold night Now next
| time you find me insensible just put bottle
of whiskey to my nose and if l don't raise
right up and take it you may as well lay me
out and send for an undertaken. l want
| that understood" " and the old man glared
around on his neighbors so hard that they
went out and left him alone with his wife.
Then she bathed the bump on the back of
his head with some arnica and camphor and
put him to bed, where he was soon fast
asleep and dreaming that he was cashier of
bank that kept its cash in his Uranium and
that burglars were trying to crack it for
nickel. WARD.