New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1893-11-08

into once honest and true patriots, who
are qualified, and who owe allegiance
only to the stars and stripes
Hit aud Miss.
saw G. G.. Hanscome oe St. Peter the
other day and learned that he had been
at the Fair - the Worlds Fair I mean.
While there he CHANGED to see the Bohe
mian lace-maker from New Ulm, and
deeming that his erstwhile residence in
our city entitled him to an informal in
terview, he boldly entered upon a con-
versatlon in the language of our country.
The crowd looked on in surprise. They
held their breath in expectancy of what
one would naturally look for in witness
sing the meeting of two old friends;
when, 10! and behold, there came from
the innocent lace maker the following
cllnching sentence: s'Ich kann NIGHT Eng
lisch;' clinching because it put an end
to Hans interview and drove him off
without chance to spring a single an
cient joke. E .-s. @..
Charlie Heidemann is apt to be very
sarcastic at times, and in dealing with
school matters he is none the less so than
when talking of other affairs. A story is
related of him as follows: Last week
Supt. Stewart was in the city to learn
the particulars of the accident to City
Clerk Schilling. Drs. Strickler and
Hlrsch were called iuto the conference,
and, as Hirsch had never met Heideman
before, the latter was introduced to him
by the ex-president of the Board of Ed
ucatlon as Dr.-the title being given
merely as joke, of course. Then, as
some physicians are apt to do, the joker
launched into lecture on anatomy and
and labored. to display his knowledge
of the subject in manner that caused
him to be gently interrupted by "Dr -
Heideman with the following remark !:
"Well, amt much on anatomy, but I'm
hell on hearts," The subject of anatomy
you can imagine, was dropped by the
joker with dull, sickening thud.
Blanchard, prince of local storv-tellers
has been circulating one this week that
has enough of merit in it to bear repro
duction. Three tailors, he says, were
standing on street corner, discussing
each others ability to make a perfect tit
One was an Englishman ana he conf
IDENTIFY vouched for the fact that if he
could but zee man going around cor
ner, he could make sure of his measure,
The second of the party was Welshman
and with pride for his own skill and
judgment, he went the Englishman one
better by claiming that he could only
catch glimpse of one side of the man
as he turned the corner he would be sure
of cutting perfect garment. But to an
Irishman it was left to cap the climax.
Without any preliminary boasting he
promptly exclaimed: Bejabers, you show
me the corner he wint around, and Oi'll
make sure enough of the fit."
Sometimes in my rambles about town
yes, quite frequently run across an
individual whose general appearance sell
dom fails to cause my sides to shake
with laughter. He is newspaper report
er by choice, I believe, hut one would
hardly know it from the first or even from
several glances. There is his hair for in
stance, trimmed, as it were, by the house
hold sheep-shears, and his trousers, bear
ing in their ample folds the evidence Of
manufacture by loving, If not by exper-
fenced hands. His hat, too, looks as though
it had braved the burning sun of many
summers, (not out Of necessity, I am surrey
while his entire garb is bleached ana
streaked over with. the accustomed col-.
oring of pioneer service. And his face !;
ali what face! Not exactly blot on
the lob of creation, and still less 4