Pawtucket tribune. (Pawtucket, R.I.) 1890-189?, 1893-05-18
MY SUICIDE.
I, too, wished to kill myself

i, too, wished 10 XIII mystu.
had Just learned the sad news that Ame!
le was faithless.
I beran TO look for rope. One would
think that for "A man who wishes TO hang
himself nothing is more easy than To find
rope. But this is an error Invent all over
the hotel without putting my hand upon
the sort Of cord i wanted.
At last found il, and putting II into my
pocket went out of the hotel in the direc-
tion of a small wood. There, behind inter
lacng leaves, knew Of a retreat which
was perfectly discreet corner in which to
die.
On the way ! thought Of Bertha-that
must have been her name. i reviled her
from the bottom Of my soul. Then looked
at the rope, measured IL and tried its pow
ers of resistance. II was not 1tactly the
sort Of rope ! should have chosen. IL ap-
peared short and not stout enough. was
annoyed. One does not realize how much
a yexation Of this sort influences the course
Of ones ideas
Still another annoyance. On reaching the
spot had chosen | was disagreeably sur
prised TO see IL occupied by another. A per-
son whose back only could see was en-
gagged in throwing "A rope over branch
above him-the very branch that l should
have chosen.
"What are you doing therei" asked.
He turned around. What does that mat
ter To your
Don't think that cannot guess your In
tentions." cried.
IF do wish to commit suicide, that only
concerns myself"
Commit suicidef"
looked at him. He was good sort OF
f.Il tor "A T.af hati IN
look, an interesting pallor.
Guessing him to be the victim OF mis-
placed attachment, l added. "for fiirtp
"Sirl'' cried he.
"Poor fool" / thought, "he Is going to
take her part. All lovers are the same"
The stranger kept silence.
would you like little advice" ! re-
marked. "Leave your rope here'-I had
noticed that IL was a better one than mine.
"Go home. Some day you will thank me-"
He shook his head. IL wish to die"
"Do not prepare bitter remorse for your
SELF" continued, with gentle insistence.
"When you are buried. IL will be too late to
regret your life."
"Do you know what has befallen mef :
II can guess"
"No, you cannot guess. A woman whom
adore, sir, for whom
And he recounted his history. Strangei
1t was was absolutely my own. This resem-
blance made me thoughtful.
"Your silence means approval" said
Charles. had just learned that his name
was Charles
mot at all" exclaimed, for l did not
wish to appear like turncoat. There IL
nothing in your story which justifies this
piece of rope" For Charles began to inter
est me.
"Why do you imagine that you have been
worse treated than others who are Tilted
every dayp
"They are not Tilted 30 humiliatingly as
was"
Pardon"
"Oh, SOP
"Yes, indeed"
"No."
"Yes know something about 1t. You
can get even with her by making love to
some one else. There are many better girls
than she"
"Better than shell Impossible"
"Yes. At first one thinks as you do, but
your ideas will have changed in a month"
My language appeared to me 80 much
that Of wisdom that gradually 1t gave me
pleasure to listen to it. l continued.
"What good will it do you to diei Just
tell me thatS Either she Is heartless or she
is not. If she is'-
"Oh, she has no heart"
NATURALLY she has not. Your death,
then, will only fiatter her. Yes, Charles,
she will also regard you as a fool, and she
will be right"
| was becoming eloquent. The fact Is
that for the last few moments had real
lied that was defending my own cause.
All that ought to have said to myself ]
was saying TO Charles-to my friend
Charleston loved him with all the affeo-
tion that he was giving me back for my
self. / put 30 much conviction into my
words that Charles fell into my arms
do with me what you WILL" he cried.
"Well," l replied, with a sigh that be-
trayed hunger, "let us breakfast"
led him back to the hotel. Emotion IL
exhausting, aud we were both Of us terribly
hungry.
When we were at the well appointed Ia
BILE and had feverishly devoured two or
three mouthfuls of food, washed down by
some good dry Bordelais, we looked at one
another In silence, and our eyes said. "Well,
is life worth livingi"
"If you had not met me- sighed Charles,
his heart overflowing with gratitude.
And although said nothing thought
the same thing.
"Do you KNOW" continued the young
man, 'it was a marvellous piece Of chance
that brought you to that part of the wood
where you met me. Ah," he remarked
suddenly, what were you doing there 80
early in the mornings"
l could not help blushing. "You will
probably not believe it," replied. II was
going to hang myself"
"Ah, bah" My companion burst out
laughing and cried, THAT IL an excellent
joke"
And we drank one another's health
From the French.