The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1893-12-09
REUBEN HAD HIM.
A Fresh Young Man and Fancy Breed Of
Guinea Pigs.


Guinea Pigs.
81 have just come in from the coun-
try" said the young man with the fall
style derby, land l succeeded in max
ing large and juicy fool of myself al
most every day while 1 was there.
stayed with an uncle of mine who has
farm sixteen or seventeen miles from
nowhere, and the Reubens got the
laughon me so many timesthat can't
remember the number.
THE queerest experience that l had,
though, was at one of their county
fairs. They held the fair early this
year for Come reason or other, and
was on hand to take it in. / went out
to the grounds with party of young
women who were visiting in the
neigh borhood, and. undismayed by
the failure of my former efforts to
string the rustics, ] started out to have
fun with them as soon as we
struck the grounds. We walked around
for a couple of hours, and was poking
all manner of fun at the people we met
Finally we came to the shed where the
poultry was on exhibition, and as we
| went along looking at the variously-
bred chickens got particularly funny.
At the end of one of the rows of coops
in It. There were quite number of
countrymen standing around looking
at the queer little animals.
"We walked over and looked at the
pigs. Then 1 said, loudly: DO you
know that if you pick UP guinea pig
by the tail its eyes will drop out?' The
countrymen stared. Fact, continued.
Pick one of them up by the tail and
its eyes will drop right out. Most
queerly constructed anatomically of
any animal known to naturalists. If
these pigs were mine would soon show
YOU
"A big, strapping fellow who stood
beside the box.said: Stranger, / don't
believe YOU / insisted that I was
right, but he stood and doggedly shook
his head, and the rest of the country
men sided with him. Now, guinea
pig has no tail. and there is where the
joke comes in. l argued for some little
time and then made grand bluff. /
pulled out little roll of bills and Of
fered to bet the Reuben twenty-five
dollars that just that thing would hap
pen. Imagine my surprise when the
Reuben hauled a greasy old pocket
book out of his jeans and covered the
money was sure l had him, for the
bet was a catch one anyhow, and as
the young women who were with me
were egging me on l couldn't think Of
fiunking.
Understand said, 4 claim that
if you pick up that guinea pig by its
tail its eyes will drop out
81 understand said the country
man, as he opened little door in the
side of the box and pulled out guinea
pig. Now, pick this one up and let's
see its eyes drop out.
Then l began to laugh. 'Ha, my
friends said, 4 have played little
trick on you, that's all. AS guinea
pig has no tail, you can't pick one up
by it. If you could do not doubt that
its eyes would drop out
II reached out for my half of the
bet, when the big countryman said:
'Hol' on there. mister. You jist look
an see if this here guinea pig hain't
got tall l examined it. and may
be switched if it didn't have a tail an
inch long. The countryman picked it
up by the little caudal appendage, and,
of course, its eyes didn't drop out.
Then he reacsed over, grabbed the
wad of money and put it in his pocket,
remarking the while: L didn't think
when developed that breed of guineas
that they would ever make that much
for me-
"Pll be blamed if he hadn't been
working for three years to produce
guinea pigs with tails. He had sue
ceeded, and l was just chump enough
to go up against the only cage of that
kind of animals in the world with my
chestnut about their eyes dropping
out."-Buffalo Press.