The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-08-17
BRIGHT BITS.

Now we have money enough to send our
minister away for two months vacation"
Isn't that long holiday
Yes; but then we feel as though we deserve
it."-Chtcago Inter-Ocean.
Friend--And what did you see at the worlds
fair?
Bride-Oh, some of the loveliest furniture
and carpets, and-and-er-oh, ever so many
other things.-Detroit Tribune.
Mr. Oldheau.-And have you been having
Miss Autograph (of Omaha)-Lovely. 1
went around the buildings and signed my
name In twenty three registers s Fair
Puck.
Mr.. Totterly-Could you marry very old
man with good deal Of money if he told you
frankly how old he was and how much he was
WORTH
Miss Timely-How much is he worth?-
Vogue
May-Two men at hotel in summer are
much more entertaining than four men.
Ethel-But suppose there are twenty Rirls2
May-That makes no difference. When there
are four men they always play poker, while
only two can't.-Life.
Dear mel" cried Mr. Barlow on the even
ing of the fireworks display, "the stick on
our finest and largest rocket is broken and
we cam replace il. There was moments
silence and then voice from the dark piazza
suggested, Use Cholly. "-Harper's Bazaar.
Irish wit, as a rule, comes like flash. Up
in Worcester county, a while ago. a pro
tracted ratnstorm left the roads almost i'm
passible for vehicles. A Yankee was driving
in light buggy, and met a jolly Irishman
ploddtng along on foot with difficulty. Said
the former: Its very bad going, Pat isn't
itY' Yes responded Pat, and it's mighty
bad comm, too. Boston Courier.
Charity and Business.-Hungry Higgins
Can't you give poor man a nickel?
Mr. Mugstein-Und vat you do nit him
stipend him for bier?
Hungry Higgins-Sure. Right here in your
own house.
Mr.. Mugstein-An right Here you vas.
always like to help poor man ven he is will
ing to trade with me.-Indianapohs journal.
Wise Chickens.-Little Dot-Chickens is
pretty smart, isn't they?
Mamma-Iu what way?
Little DOt-Why. papa and other folks al
ways says blessing before beginning to eat:
but chickens don own anything. and isn't
sure what they Il get so they don't say any
blessing till they gets through eating and be
gins to drfnk.-Street Smith s Good News
A scheme That Failed,-"I hear that Sam
merby and his wife are trying to get divorce.
What is the trOuhle:"
"Incompatibility Of temper You see they
made an agreement wnen they were wed that
they should never both get angry at the same
time. The result Is that instead of both get
ulg mad at once and lighting 1t out, one or the
other is angry all the time, and they don't
have any happy moments at aL"-Indian-
apOliS Journal.
Willing to Be Hanged ~ wouldn't have
minded 1t so much" said the prisoner. as he
smiled sad, sweet smile at the lady who had
brought him the bouquet. If the court had
been man of any culture
Isn't il terrible to think of the dreadful
coarse, horrible fellows who are elected to
honorable positions here in the west?" she
murmured Sympatheucally.
Yes he answered with a sigh; ito be tried
and condemned by man of his stamp was
awful and then when he said 1 was to be
hung by the neck until dead. il grated on my
nerves more than l can tell you. Detroit
Tribune.