St. Tammany farmer. [volume] (Covington, La.) 1874-current, 1893-10-14

where'er they bloom. Thy sunlight she0
Bless little heads OF ripplins ha;ri
On. take insb Thy tender caro-
Each rosy-check and curly-headi
Edgar w. Abbot, in Outlook.
HICKS PATENT COOKER.
The Pathetic Story That Induced
the Rector TO Buy.
81 would like to call your attention
70 my paytent cooker" said the mild
hammered man with the soft low voice
TO the rector of St BartholomewA 1t
consists, as mcbbe you can see"
but I don't desire a cooker, and
would not look at one il ! did," inter
rupted the rector of St Bartholomew's
in rs iras4ble manner as is permitted
70 his cloth.
"They come In three sizes" contiu-
ued the mild-manncrcd man with the
soft low voice-.'small. mcjum aud
large They're made of tin. gcnuwine
block tin. not rolled tin ! have fire.
qucntly been congratulated on the
quality Of my tin. Said Bishop Dobson
to me: Hicks, congratulate you on
the quality of your tin.'"
''Bishop Dobson?" queried the rector
Of St. Bartholomcw's with languid in
terest. II don't remember to have seen
his name in the church calendar"
"Methody." explained the mild-man-
nered man. ..l'm q Mcthody. Here's
. certificate from ny pastor saying I'm
an individooal of moral character and
use good tin In my cookers. Here's
letter from Rev. Edward Atkins-but
don't set much store by that, bcin' -
he is a Baptis', and NO judge OF tin.
The principle on which my cooker Is
based"
"You will have to excuse me-" said
the rector of St. Bartholomew, look
ing hard at the heavy gold watch pre-
sented him by the parish on his last
birthday, but I have . sermon TO
write"
'.Mebbe your lady would like TO see
the cooker" said the mild-mannercd
man. "It's made of genuwinc block
tin. and Bishop Dobson himself said:
Hicks. I congratulate ycu on the quail
ity Of your tin"
81 have no wife," said the rector.
With the mcrest suspicion Of blush.
'Then buy . cooker and git one" /" said
the mild-mannered man. confidentially.
'with Hicks paytent cooker - an
crgumint, you will git one easy. They
come in three sizes-small, mejum and
large. This here is the small one.
Folds all up, you see, like telescope.
Mebbe you wouldn't believe II, but one
Of them small-sizcd cookers saved my
life once. 1t was in the spring OF 1853.
or the fall Of ls52. or the winter Of
1854. I don't remember which and II
don't make NO difference. that Rev. DR..
james Wilyums. u. D.. and ! took pas
sage for Africky In the brig Thomas J..
Wallxup, gcin' as missionaries to some
Of the numerous cannibal tribes that
keeps down the population, and conse-
queutly accounts for the depressed
values Of real estate in the Dark Con-
tinent Rev. DR.. Wilyums was to teach
the savages religion, but my mission
was . more important one. was to
introduce Hicks paytent cooker among
'em You can see that even this large
sized cooker won't hold . man. to say
nothin' Of the mejum and small
ones Now I calculated to teach the sav-
ages TO use my cookers, and when they
got 50 attached to 'em rs to never eat
nothin' except what was cooked IN .
cooker-seein' that you couldn't cook .
man in n'em-cannibalism would natur-
ally die out When broached my plan
to Bishop Dobson his eyes shone and he
said: Go. Hicks, go. Your work will
supplement the work of Rev. Dr.. VIII
gums heartily commend your plan,
and congratulate you on the quality
Of your tim Them was his words, and
! went r
"Well, sir, the mornin' sitter I ar-
rived In Africky began to talk 70 the
chief about my cooker. when what
does he do bat take me down TO the
leadin' grocery store Of the town and
show me Rev. DR.. Wilyums chained mp.
"Can you cook him? axed the chief
NO said I. my breath oil gone
with surprise 1t tho turn Affairs had
took.
"'Well.' said the old chief, 'them's
the kind Of victuals we eats We don't
consume much in the way of breakfast
foods, infants foods and the like. II
; your cooker can't cook our style Of pro-
visions we amt got any use for it.
'And with that they put me In their
Jail. and that was the last I ever seen
or heerd Of Rev. Dr.. James Wilyums,
d. d. They would have ct me 1t once,
but the chiefs daughter, UgoRina. fell
in love with me. and made 'em put OF
tho obsequies or festivities, according
- you looked at 1t from my stand
point or the savagcs'. talked nice to
Ugogina, and got her TO bring me nv
small-sized cooker. the only one the old
witch doctor what kept the cookers
would let her have; and with that
cooked them savages the finest kinds Of
victuals they ever ct and they Get me free
and made mo royal cook, and the chief
kinder smiled indulgenuy It the way
Ugogina was maxim up to me So you
eee the small-sized cooker saved my
life"
"rn buy the small size" said the
rector. hastily. Il have a sermon to
write"
..Now you just take my advice and
nit Q meium size. You can afford Il.
When you take that small-sized cooker
round to that young lady you're after;
when you ask her to marry you what'll
she thinkf Why, she'll say to herseli
that in buyin' this small cooker you an
layin' out not to ever have any CON
popy to meals. and il she is . girl that