The Progress., 1893-11-11
Humor in Senator Hoar.

Senator Hoar of Observation-Disclosures
the men in the press gallery have irrever-
emily dubbed Grandma" nudgng one an
other when Mr.. Hoar rises and speaking of
catnip tea and lace caps and knitting nee
dles-has also become somewhat of a hu-
morist. One day the vice president had
made certain ruling as to the order of
business. 1t was not of much Importance,
but what little significance it had was ia
vorable to the Democratic side of the cham
Der. Therefore every one was surprised as
well as amused when Mr.. Hoar walked
down to the open space in front of the pre-
siding officers desk and exclaimed in his
shrill, squeaky voice, "Mr President, am
sorry to say the chair is right" What he
said was serious enough, but his manner OF
saying it was excruciatingly funny.
1t remained for Senator Cockrell of Mis-
souri, to perpetrate the worst pun known to
the long debate. The senate was voting on
one of the amendments and Senator Villas
of Wisconsin had made statement con-
cerning transfer of the pair which he had
with another senator Mr. CockrelI was
interested in this matter, and after briefly
explaining his position said there was no
doubt as to how the senator from Wiscon.
u.
it was as Villas" the bill itself The happi.
est pun which thedebate developed was that
of Senator WolcOtt of Colorado, who spoke
of senator's who were always talking of their
devotion to the cause of bimetallism, and at
the same time voting for gold standard.
They are bimetallists," exclaimed Mr.
Wolcott, "sweet by and by metallists" a
hit which raised general laugh in the
chamber
Sent For M. PETER.
These are only few of the thousands Of
incidents and humors of the repeal cam.
paign. There was the remarkable speech
of Senator Sherman, the Nestor of the sen.
ate, in which he arraigned the other side of
the chamber for its inaction-a speech
which helped to bring on the final result
There were speeches by Senators Teller and
Wolcott which almost brought tears to the
eyes of the listeners when they described
the sufferings and hardships which the peo-
pie OF the silver producing states would
have to undergo. There was the speech of
Mr.. Peffer, with a stack of books before
him that reached to his chin, and upon the
top of which he balanced the bowl of SCUM
with which he occasionally refreshed him
self, much to the ebedragglement of his long
whiskers. There was the speech of Don
Cameron, made with head bent over his
manuscript and in a voice that was not
audible dozen feet away-the first speech
which Mr.. Cameron has made in 12 years.
There was the happy use of metaphor on
the part of Mr.. voorhees,, the leader of the
repeal campaign. Once Mr.. voorhees, de- |
clared he would rather be carried from the
senate chamber feet foremost and be laid
in his grave out in Indiana than to surren- |
der this fight. After the failure of his
physical test sortie Mr.. voorhees, came up |
smiling with the declaration that he was
like the famous John Paul Jones. When |
the enemy had riddled Jones' ship with |
shot and shell and stopped firing long
enough to ask the dauntless commander if /
he was ready to surrender, John Paul had |
seized his speaking trumpet and shouted |
across the waters: Surrender Surrender |
have only begun to fightr
The happiest and most graceful of all
metaphor used by Mr. Voorhees, in this re.
struggle was near the end of the
contest, when he turned toward Senator Tel
er, who sat with bowed head and drawn
features across the aisle, exclaiming, 81 say
20 the vanquished leader of the opposition
orces, the senator from Colorado, that we
ire proud to pay him the honors of war
md salute his flag as he passes defeated
rom the field of battle"
ROBERT GRAVES.