The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1893-08-01
cHAUNCEY DEPEw LAUGHS.

| HI d ldtc IltcINlC" IuL SIduuCCy VA
Depew of New York characterizes the
financial situation as nothing more than
a 'scare and an absurdity." 1t will
strike some heavy losers of late, that
Mr.. Depew is a trifle late with his
diagnosis OF the financial invalid, but
since no further sacrifices are required
than to lay aside our predictions TO
ghosts and other absurdities we will
proceed with alacrity, and deep sense
of gratitude to follow directions till the
conditions are normal and healthy.
Speaking of the PROSTATE industries.in
Colorado, this great attorney for the Van
derbiIts says "the amusing but distressing
spectacle was presented of the people
taking up whatever they could lay their
hands on of their belongings and getting
out of the state as fast as possible" 1t
will, no doubt, be some comfort to the
people of Colorado TO know that their
misfortunes have their uses. Mr.. Depew
has admitted publicly that he is amused
and it only requires an adjustment of the
sorrowful means to this great end to
convince them that the distressing
spectacle is not to the world. What is
the closing of mines, the blowing out of
furnaces, the suspension of banks and the
consequent suffering of thousands, to
the laudable end of having provided
this potentate the materials for a laugh;
it is no doubt matter of inconvenience
and possibly serious loss to many to
gather up their regular belongings and
leave the state, but let us hope the sac
rifice Is not too great if the incident sue
ceeds in provoking good, rollicking,
healthy gufaw from this selfsacrificipg
patriot whom the force Of circumstances
seems to require shall be content with
paltry $4,000 year for his estimable
services.
He further condescends to give out
this rare bit of information:
II met in Europe last summer the
head of one of the largest banking
houses in the world, though had no
direct agency there. He said: We
cannot make money in Europe why
don't you come to America? said I.
We'll, he replied, if were well satisfied
about your financial conditions and bus
mess methods as / am with financial
conditions as they exist here, l would
transact a large part of our business ia
your country"
Most as!ute financiering, that. The
head Of the largest banking house in the
world said TO Chauncey NJ. Depew that
he was making no money in Europe,
but would transact large part of his
business in the United States if our
financial conditions" would allow him
10 DO as we'll here.
We are prone to inquire which of the
individuals to this most
interview was sober?
Further, Mr.. Depew tells us,
"When l was abroad last summer /
talked with several of the leaders of both
the great English parties. There was
no bimetallic sentiment in the Forey
party, and the Liberal party was a unit
fox "a single gold standard" Most
subtle distinction Had we the i'm
pertinence to be inquisitive we would
ask, are there other great questions
dividing the two great English parties?"
He also gravely announces ''the belief
among English statesmen that with a
gold standard the finances of Great
Britain are always on a sound basis, and
that London will remain the financial
mt of tbn xynrl1 - rrl,io
ing revelation will, doubtless, serve to
remove all doubts in the American
mind as to MIR. Bulls fidelity 10 a gold
or that London is, in his esti-
nation, the center of the whole planet
airy system. These separate items of |
gratuitous information from "abroad" |
are well enough in their way, but there
are certain incongruities in this inter-
view not quite self explanatory to the
plebian mind. 1t may be owing to a
weary reporters effort to abridge his
duties by reporting two interviews in
one. For instance. Mr. Depew was
called upon for his views upon che finan-
cial situation here. After bare refer |
ence to the fact that he was amused to
see everybody scared, he proceeds with
out notice to enlighten the world as to
his movements when abroad last summer.
Clearly one is a condition in which |
many have lively interest while the |
other is An event which interests nobody
but Mr.. Depew. The thing dovetails |
like pothooks and is SYM
metrical like sundry eggs in different
baskets. The facility with which he dis
poses of the main question by the intro
duction of subject matter entirely for
eign, awakens the suspicion that in the
profound depths of Mr.. Depew's legal
mind the distressed conditions here are |
more or less superinduced by the royal
dictum of the great ''bankers" and |
political leaders of England. In
justice to Mr.. Depew let us hope we are |
unable to grasp the mental processes of |
his great brain. Summed up and |
analysed we think we comprehend this |
much: Mr.. Depew was interviewed.
Mr.. Depew is amused. Mr.. Depew was |
abroad last summer. Mr.. Depew hob
nobbed with lords and squires-further,
it is incoherent, irrelevant and trans. |
lucent as mud.
WHY NOr2