Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1893-01-23
JUST FOR FUN.

especially if it is hard-boiled egg.
'That remains to be SEEM" as the
boy said when he spilled the ink on
the tablecloth.
WOOL hear Bronson's marriage is
failure; is it true? Van Pelt-A fail
ure? it was regular peach crop.
Mrs. Figg-Where is that custard /
put away this noon? Tommy-I-I
guess it vanished into the empty heir.
It's the woman who has a brown
plush sacque on who can quickest tell
a sealskin when she sees it on another
woman.
The reed bird still figures on the bill
of fare in some restaurants; but his
part is taken by his understudy, the
sparrow.
Book Agent (returning after being
fired down one flight, to irate broker)
But now, joking aside, won't you
take one copy?
The restaurant dish of strawberries
and cream illustrates well what can
be made of ''little drops of water and
little grains of sand'
Caller-What are you looking thro'
that big pile of comic papers for? Elk
change Editor with a sigh of disap
pointment) For fun.
Capitalization is that town you
spoke to me about few months ago;
ic If 1oi6
indeed; sitter than mackerel."
He-What would you do Miss Sly
boots, suppose you were in my boots?
She-I think I'd feel inclined to go
and get them shined.
Mr.. Egotist-Aw, Mrs. Frivolous, do
you think that fashionable women APP
preciate rising young men? Mrs. Friv-
olous-Yes; in the street cars.
GuoD AND RELIABLE.-A good and reliable
family medicine is Sulphur Bitters. Every
Spring for six years have been troubled with
boils. Since / began using Sulphur Bitters,
have not had single one. You can rely on
Sulphur Bitters every time.-Editor Weekly
Nei0s.
''This is rather an expensive umbrella /
for you to carry. Did you pick it up !
at bargain counter? "Not exactly. /
picked it up at reception"
'See, Ryer, here's German clock !
bought for you in New York"
"Good gracious, Hiram! How foolish |
You know L can't understand word
of German"
PnntinO CiOhf fn 10 WI ioa
did my heart good. Larkin-What
was it? Bunting-A plumber getting
a prescription compounded at retail
drug store.
She-Isn't your hair turning gray
quite young? He-Well, I don't know.
I have two daughters who are learn
ing to play on the piano and one who
is beginning to sing.
"What frightfully hot fire you've
got here" said Nell, who had just
dropped in for a call. eyes," said
Bobby; "Belle has just been burning
Mr.. Gushley's love letters"
Little Nellie had been quiet for
good while. "What's the matter?',
asked UnO mOUnSr Us unhappy |
Unhappy" "Yes'm" "Why?" 81 ,
5an't fink of any question to ask"
Philadelphia - | think it strange
you New Workers. never turn to look
after pretty woman on the street, as
most men do. New Yorker-We do ,
lot need to. There is always another
pretty woman just coming up.
Friend-What on earth are you do {
ng to that picture? Great Artist :
I'M rubbing piece of raw meat over !
mis- rabbit in the foreground. Mrs. ;
De Shoddie will be here this after
loon and when she sees her pet dog
nell of that rabbit, she'll buy it.
Persons who are subject to attacks of bilious
Ole can almost invariably tell, by their feel
ngs, when to expect an attack. IL Chamber
aims Collie, Cholera and DiaTrhoea Remedy is
AIKEN soon as these SYMPTOMS appear, they
an ward off the disease Such persons should
lways keep the Remedy at hand, ready for
use when needed. Two or three \
oses of it at the right time will them
luch suffering. For sale by III. G. Pierce.