The Irish standard. [volume] (Minneapolis, Minn. ;) 1886-1920, 1893-11-04
1. All SIN AS A SERVANT.
The Monaghan Cook secretively Refuses
to Make Known His Recipes.

sts I. !.
Those accustomed to "Beau Brum-
MEL colored walters or neat house
maids can hardly appreciate how RI
diculous a Chinaman first appears in
the capacity of waiter, with his shaved
head, snakelike queue, stiffiy laun-
dered long, white coat and apron, PAN
talet-like trousers. and thick soled
slippers; but with all, says writer in
the Washington Post, he serves the
different courses ''alle ite," and
handles the table appointments with
his long, thin fingers in a character
istic style all of his own. When a
housekeeper employs a China boy"
she must in the very beginning forci-
bly, demonstrate to him in pigeon
English his different duties, else
when she calls upon him to perform
extra ones enever fully comprehends.
AS an instance. a cook was one day di-
rected by his mistress to select and
''devitalize" two chickens for dinner.
He seemed never to have heard of q
chicken until he saw no way out OF 1t.
whereupon the widest confusion and
cackling issued from the poultry
yard, and there stood ''Ah Wing"
frantically swinging the neck of the
last of score of chickens, as he calm
ly said: "You tell me killee chicken
an killee chicken" AS the house.
hold supply of coal oil was diminish
ing at great rate, All Wing was
questioned aboutit. Much astonished,
he asked: do you think drink coal
oil?" His conversation consisted much
of the phrase: ''You think So" When
meeting a visiting member of the
family whom his mistress presented as
her brother, he politely said: "You
think so;" laughingly she told him she
had always been taught to believe so.
Cinnamon are exceedingly secretive,
and housewives seldom find out how
they prepare certain favorite dishes,
for as soon as her Chef is watched he
hastily gathers together his ingredi-
ents and utensils and retires to the
pantry or .discontinues operations alto
gether, and it is quite as impossible to
get him to write out a formula of any
kind. The young son of a family liv-
ing near Los Angeles once purchased
an ostrich egg, and as an experiment
had the cook make an omelet of it, re-
questing him to write the recipe. 1t
goes without saying the omelet was
more powerful than delicate, and the
description read: lone heapee big
egg he malzee one l1eapee big omelee. -
Celestials have a penchant for sweet
desserts and frequently to encourage
new cooks families attempt to partake
of three different egg desserts at one
dinner. 1t is better and more eco
nomical plan to hide the egg beater in
the beginning. They also possess a
great fondness for lettering and exc
cutting the most fantastic designs,
with cones, on pies and puddings. In
these they often sadly mix their Sun
day-school teachings and show lack
of reverence. Once at a large board
ing-house in Pasadena, the beautiful
suburb of Los Angeles, the cook
shocked all the boarders by placing
before them pie, upon which was the
following exhortation: Come to Je-
sus. Marengo Hall" Another, in
making out his grocery lists, always
heads them with a Scriptural quota
ton, as: BLESSED are the pure in heart
for they shall see God. Two packages
of cornstarch, five pounds of butter