The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1893-09-27
PITH AND POINT.

When the goat tackled the can OF
dynamite. you ought to have seen the
butter fly.
Every time a wise man makes a
| mistake it teaches him something
Ram Horn.
do not put off upon others advice
that you are unable to. keep for your
| own use.-GalvestonN News.
The individual who does things ac-
cording to his own sweet viii generally
has very sour won t.-Puck.
The great difficulty about common
sense is that it is SO tremendously
scarce that it isn't common. Texas
Siftings.
IF should ask you to lend me
Ave pounds. what would happene''
Prospective Victim (terselyl-'-o, moth
ing. Tit Bits.
Man generally falls because he is
an egotistical fool: AMI the woman who
falls is the one that has believed il him.
Rest Islander.
Perpetual pushing and assurance
put difficulty ont of countenance and
make seeming impossibility give
way.-Jereny Collier
He from New York WAS it you
heard singing After the Bali this
evening"" She from Philadelphia
after what oall?~-Life.
There's curious state of things
in our church choir what is ito.
''The members are all at peace with
each other."-N. Y. Press.
Brown has the job he was after
plenty of light work" What's he do
ing?" Attending motors at the cleo
trio plant. Atlanta Constitution.
Now, Walter, what did you say
to Mr.. Benton for the nice peaches he
sent you?" Walter-''I said wish he'd
send free stones next time."-Inter-
Ocean.
You can't always tell By listening
to man while he prays at Friday
evening meeting just what he will do
in a. horse trade Saturday afternoon
Somerville Journal.
The Debutante fasidel-"How
many verses shall l sing?" The Pro-
tessor--'Do you want an encore?" The
Debutante-''Of course" The Profess
sor-''One. Boston Budget.
Very Appropriately
say you presented Squib, the humorist,
with cameo Bill-''Yes." Will
What kind of wood was it made of?"
Bill-''Chestnut. Yankee Blade.
-Doub Loaded You're nice
type of man." said Jones, as he
plugged the burglar with couple of
balls. ''Double-leaded type" said the
expiring thug.-Arkansas Traveller.
Mistaken Enthusiastically Hello,
old man! Awfully glad to see you.
Here, take off that coat and put on this
smoking jacket and make yourself com
Portable" Dick-'Deuce take it. Do
you mean to insinuate that l don't feel
comfortable in a dress suit?"-Truth.
-Mandy-"Here, Josiah, is a drug
store; now let US go in an get them
souvenir spoons we've read so much
about" Josiah-''Gracious. Mandy,
you won't find 'em here, will you?"
Mandy-"Josiah. | know what I'm
dom; didn't l see in a paper that they
was drug in the market?'
-ATCieSS 1OIlLHy. - OHIuV- Gay,
Mr.. Yabsley, sister Laura said at the
table this morning that she thought
you had the prettiest mustache she
ever saw" Yabsley-''You oughtn't
to tell things You hear at the table,
Tommy" Tommy-''But she is going
to give me dime for telling YOU
Indianapolis Journal.
The Fizzletop children were play
ing with their toys. Johnny, you are
spelling the whole game. You are the
biggest donkey 1 ever saw" said little
Mamie. Colonel Fizzletop (reproving-
ly)-'Whv, Mamie, 1 am surprised"
Mamie Gndignantly)-''Why, pa, I
didn't mean you. You amt the big
gest donkey 1 ever saw!'
-Lawyer-''And now please state
the remainder of the conversation be-
tween you and the defendant" Wit
neSs-'I do not remember it. sir" The
substance of it escapes me-" Lawyer
Observation-Disclosures mind the sub
stance of it. Tell us the words, and
fancy the jury will have the intelli-
gence to get at the substance. "-Har-
per'S Bazaar