The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1893-11-19


think will be moro agreeable to the auestioner.
For example. our author tells us that poor
italian organ grinder. weary after u long walk.
asked a peasant whom no met n eur Carricktuo-
hill how far he was from Cork. Just four
short miles" was tho answer What do you
mean ?" said priest. who happened to pass at
tho time by deceiving tho poor fellow. You
know well enough it's eight long miles
'Sure. your raverance." said the other. Il
seen the poor boy was tired. and l wanted TO
keep his courage up. II be hoard your raver-
snce-but I'm PLACED to think he didnt-he'd
be downhear;ed entirely" Another story
illustrating tho same propensity is said 10 DO
well known In Kerry. An Irish gentleman was
shooting with an English friend. n Mr.. b. They
had very little sport. SO Mr. Is. said. IN ask
this eountryman whether there are any birds
about here" No use to ask him." said his
companion hell only tell you lies" "pll
ask him ut all events said Mr.. B. My good
man. are there any birds about horeT Lots
OF birds. your honor" said he. Tell mo
what sort Of birds" We'll. nov. your honor,
there's Erouses. and woodcocks and snpes,
and ducks and tillibires. and all sorts OF
birds" Ask him." whispered the Irish gen
tleman. whether there are any thermome-
ters." Tell me-" said B.. do you ever see
any thermom eters about here?" We'll now.
your honor. II there was a nice frost tho piace
would be alive with them" Many years after
ward as our author drove with his wife from
Killarney to kenmare. he told her this story.
She said she could hardly believe it He said:
''PIl try with this boy. and you'll see he'll say
much the same" So he said to the hare-leG-
god boy who was running along beside the
carriage. What is the name Of the little river
near us?" ''Tis the Finnhry. your honor"
Are there many fish in it 2" There is. your
honor" What sort of fish p There do be
throuts and cells, your honor" Any salmon 7"
'There do be an odd one" ANY white trout?"
There do be good lot Of them" ANY Their
mometers?' Them does be there. too. your
honor but they comes up lather in the season
than the white throuts."
II any one doubts that the Irioh peasantry
are largely endowed with mother wit he
should hear the answers which some Of them
make In the witness box to cross-examiners
Our author was present when very bullying
counsel named Freeman was completely put
out in his cross.eSamination by a very simple
snswer. A countryman who was q witness
was asked. 80 you had plstol:" :" had.
sir" Who did you intend to shoot with it ?"
II wasn't intending to shoot no one.' Then
was 1t for nothing that you got it?" No. it
wasn't" Come. come. cir. on the virtue Of
your solemn oath. what did you get that pistol
for Z" "On the virtue Of my solemn oath. got
It for three and min epence in Mr. Richardson's
chop" At another time the same counsel said
TO . witness. You're a nice fellow. amt
you" Witness replied. I am sir. and il
was not on my oath ia say the same OF YOU"
Another instance o: the Irish PEASANTS Gift
for repartee. Ii scoms that one Judge Burton
who was q very old and wizened littlo man.
was tryins n case. when another very old man.
o peasant scarcely able TO walk. came into
court to give evidence. Instead OF going to the
witness box he went toward the passage lead
ing to the bench. One OF the counsel called
out to him. Come back. sir. whero are you
going Do you think you are q Judge" In
deed. sir" said the old man. looking up at
Judge Burton. Indeed. si- believe l am fit
for little else"
Our authors work rs an engineer involved
much travelling by coach and car in country
and In town, and many quick wi!ted drivor
no has met. One old fellow drove him TO his
Office on bitterly cold winters morning. lie
arrived In o snowstorrn. and never did he sce
he tells US. such q picture OF suffering from
the cold rs the poor old man. His whskers
and his beard were stiff with frost and snow.
and miniature icicles depended from his nose.
Having laid him his fare. Mr. lie Fanu said to
him Ia little unfeelinsly. perhaps. II hope the
pidees are not biting you this morning?"
"Bedad they are. your honor" he answered.
IAN it's what think this hate theatl will be
for thunder" A friend OF our authors the
Row DR.. Marshall. q well-kpown convert to
Rome. who was very large man. weighing
about twonty stone. took Il covered car from
Dublin to Drumcondra. Before he got into
tho car. he asked tho driver to tell him what
tho fare was. II lave that to you. your raver-
shce" But how much is it" Whatever
your reverence PLACES" THAT won't do /
Rhall not get into the car till you tell me the
fare" Get in at once. your reverence. for IL
the horse turns and gets sight OF you. the
divil step he'll 20 at all" There are many
other stories about car drivers In this book.
but we have space only for three more. The
late Father ODwyer. parish priest OF Ennis
kerry. gave u carman who had driven him
homo on a wet day, glass OF whiskey. He
begged for another glass Father O'Dwyer.
who knew that the man was rather too fond OF
spirits. refused and. still holding the decanter
fn his hand. said " Every glass OF that you
drink Is nail in you- coffin" why, then.
your reverence" said the man. "as you have
the hammer in your hand. you might as well
drive another nail into it," An other priest.
having given a glass OF whIskey to q carman
who complained Of not feeling well. said to
him. How do you feel now2 Didn't that
mako another man OF your" "Bcdad 1t did.
your reverence: and the other man would like
q glass, too" Finally. We are told that an old |
lady. getting into q cab In Grafton street. |
Dublin. was heard to say to the driver. Help |
mo to get in. my good man. for I'm very old"
"Hegorra. num-" said he. ;" no matter what
ago you are. you don't look It,"
Many are tho stories Nr. Le FanI has hoard
OF Irish Judges and barrsters In former days.
Ope OF tho best was connected with case tried
in Limerick before Chief Baron O'Grady. A
bArriBter named Bushe was making n Aneecl
for the defence. when an ass began to bray
loudly outside the court, "Wait moment"
said tho Chief Baron. "Ope az n time. Mr..
Bushe. II you please" The barrister waited for
. chance to retort. and, 1t came presently.
Whom OGrady was charging the jury tho ass
sEain began TO bray. IL possible more loudly
than before. Il beg your pardon. my lord"
said Bushe. May ask you to repeat your
last words there is such an echo In this court
did not quito catch themr' A well-Gnown
Irish Judge. tho late Judge L.. had an idlosyn-