davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1893-12-28
PITH AND POINT.

/ -ssYou may trim me mustache, aw,
said Gilly to the barber. Yes, sir, re
| piled the latter; ibid you bring it with
| you?''-Brooklyn Life.
| -Editor-.'Always write your jokes
on the thinnest paper you can get. =
Young Humorist-''Why?" Editor
$50 can see through them"
Young Callowe-''I expect to start
for London and Paris'to-morrow. Can
I do anything for you?" Prunella-
"Yes; to be sure not to miss your
| steamer.''-Life's Calendar.
| -Hicks-"'Cold in DEATH Do you
| think that good expression" Wicks
| LIT depends good deal upon the
| kind of life which has been led by
| the deceased. Boston Transcript.
AT the Salon. Can you tell me
what that picture representa-" "That
is Queen Cleopatra. Have you never
heard of her?'' ''Never in my life. l
| so seldom read the papers "-L'Intran-
sigeant.
-''Doan put yer min too much on
outward decorations" said Uncle Eben.
"Hit am bettah ter hab er cabbage un-
dab yoh waistcoat dan er chrysanthe-
HULL III yer DuGGOA-ho1Cs w
ton Star.
Matrimonial Advertisement. IA
lady, young, pretty. bright and poor,
desires to make the acquaintance of a
man with the opposite qualities, with
a view to a happy marriage. File
gende Batter.
-''What is your line of business?"
whispered the editor to a man he was
about to introduce to northern CAPT.
talists. ST hauls furniture" huskily
game the reply. Here, gentlemen"
continued the editor, sis Mr.. Jones,
one of the moving spirits of our city"
Atlanta Constitution.
-Figg-"In this story there is
strange inconsistency. In one place
the author says his heroine is all heart,
and little farther on he says her
heart was in her boots That is sim
ply ridiculous" Fogg-"You forgot
that the heroine is from Chicago. y
Boston Transcript.
-Slow-Mrs. Litehead wanted Mr..
L. to do something or other and he was
still hesitating. "Well," she said.
what are you going to do?" II haven't
made up my mind yet ''Well, l de-
clare, she cAcldlU1eO. IL UdhcS you dA
extremely long time to make up a very
small thing. Free Press.
"A book agent went into barber
shop and asked the proprietor if he
could sell him an encyclopedia.
''What's dat?" asked the tonsorial ar
fist. cit is book that contains in
formation on every subject in the
world Victim in the chair says
feebly: ''He doesn't need it."-Texas
Siftings.
An Exact Office Boy.-visitor ZEN
tering outer office)-"Is Mr.. Jones at
home?" Office Boy (politely)-"Yes,
sir" Visitor-''Can see him?" Office
Boy-'I suppose SO, sir" Visitor
Starting for inner ofice)-"Where?
In shere?" Office Boy Gnnocently)-
mo, sir; his home is in Hamstramck."
Detroit Free Press.
-Lawyer-''You say you made an
examination of the premises. What
did you find?" Witness-''Oh, nothing
of consequences; beggarly account of
empty boxes, as Shakspere says"
Lawyer Never mind what Shak-
spere says. He will be summoned, and
can testify for himself if he knows
anything about the case. "-Tit-Bits
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1893-12-28
German
Syrup

Ny niece, Eme1ine Hawley, was,
taken with splitting blood, and she
became very much alarmed, fearing
that dreaded disease, Consumption
She tried nearly all kinds of nedi-
cine but nothing did her any good.
Finally she took German Syrup and
she told me it did her more good
than anything she ever tried. It
stopped the blood, gave her strength
and ease, and good appetite. I
had it from her own lips. Mrs.
Mary A. Stacey, Trumbull, Conn.
Honor to German Syrup. q
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1893-12-28
SHE ACCOUNTS FOR 1T.

A Young Woman Tells Why Women Pay
Their Car Fare In Pennies.
He wanted to pay her car fare, but
she said:
ooh, no! / have the change right
here!'
And as his gloves were very new and
rather tight, though you could never
have wrung such an admission from
him, she had deity extracted five pen
MES from ridiculous little purse she
carried and had put them into the con-
ductor's grimy hand before he got his
fingers into his change pocket.
Really, now! that was too bad of
your he said. and then he put the
handle OF his stick in his mouth and re-
garded with meditative eyes, that ride
ulous little purse of hers.
ooh % he said at last.
She looked at him with an attentive
smile.
'sAh!' he said again. ST think
''Ne!' she said, with an air of as
constituent, but he did not hear.
Il think have noticed that you la.
dies generally pay your ear fare il
pennies"
She waited.
II thought
''Don't do it again." she murmured.
Il thought had noticed it."
He looked appealingly at her, but
her smile remained expectant.
"Well?" was all she said.
''Ah," he remarked, with a weary,
disappointed air, would you mind tell
ing me why you do it?''
There was a faint CLEAN in her eye
as she replied:
''Oh, + really don't know exactly. 1
think there are several reasons. One
is it is a game to give and take. Women
pay their fare in pennies because the
conductors give them pennies in
change. You never see a conductor
unloading his penny pocket upon men.
A man can carry small change much
better than woman. He has a pocket
specially dedicated to- that purpose,
whereas a woman has one purse or
pocketbook for all OF her money and
various other things besides. Still. it
is always into the woman's hand that
the conductor counts out the pennies
he wants to get rid of. I think (but
it's bad habit, and I wouldn't do it
often if I were you) that he does it be-
cause woman's parse is SO small that
an occasional penny drops ont and the
conductor gets it. The women give
the conductors pennies on the principle
of paying him hack in his own coin.
And the reason some men do not pay
their fare in pennies is because it is too
great tax on their intellects to count
out the right number"
''You don't say SOP he said. He fol-
lowed her advice and did not try to
think. But Il wouldn't have made any
difference if he had.-N. Y. Sun.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1893-12-28
Marvellous Development.

s.How times do change ~ soliloqui;
Uncle Allen Sparks. ''For insta1
Year 1s4s-poker at the hearth-'C
in and sit DOWN. Year 1s93-pokeI|
the table-.Sit in and come down
Chicago Tribune.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1893-12-28
Modern Progress.

She-You have been taken away in
the country, haven't you?
He-Yes. Visiting some people
used to know when was boy.
particular friends?"
ssOh, no. Father and mother.
Judge.
Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1893-12-28
A GEORGIA SENSATION.

The Late Charles Arnold q Defaulter and
Suicide.
ATLANTA, Ga. Dec. 21.-Atlanta has
another big sensation. The sudden
death of Charles Arnold, secretary of
the Piedmont Exposition Co., which
occurred few weeks ago, did
not create any particular comment,
as it was understood that it was
simply a case of relapse from grip.
1t did, however, cause deep and
sincere regret, for Arnold was consid-
cred the soul of honesty and honor and
had won the esteem of all who knew
him. The startling discovery is made
that he was a defaulter, that he had
raised checks, and, it is further alleged,
forged others. 1t has been impossi BILE,
owing to the illness of other officers,
to secure a complete statement of tho
amount of his defaleation, but it is
presumed it will reach $4,000.
The directors have never been able
to secure a statement about the mid
summer carnival. It was generally be-
lieved that it had made money, but
Arnold always said it did not. On top
of this discovery comes positive evil
dence tina. he committed suicide. The
day he took sick he told his barber he
had come for his last shave, and in
vited him to his funeral
Assassination of Gen. Campo-HaytPy
Independence Day.
NEW YORK. Dec. 21.-The Evening
Sun says: Information has been re-
ceived from private adviees at the
consulate-general of the republic of
San Domingo of the assassination of
Gen. Joaquin Campo, governor of the
province of Azua and delegate in the
southern part of the island. The news
of the assassination reached the cap
ital December 4. No details were
given.
F. L. Vasquez, consul-general to
New York from San Domingo, said to-
day that great prepare tons were be-
ing made for the visit of the president
of San Domingo to Hayti TO join in the
celebration of Haysis independence
day on January i.
No disturbance of any Importance
has been reported at The consulate.
Arrival of a Noted English stallion.
New YORK, Dee. 21.--The White Star
stea Gamer Tauric arrived to-day, and had
| on board the noted English stallion
Islipgton for the McCalmont stud farm
in california. Islington is brother
OF leinglass He arrived here in good
con- aition, Notwithstanding the stormy
voy ge. ]. Shaw Robinson, brother
| in-f H of Mr.. McCalmont, e1me here to
rec we the stallion.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1893-03-30
"a LITTLE NONSENSE"

Turn About - Every time you
spill anything on the table-cloth you
must give me cent" said Franks
mother. "And do get cent every
time don't spill?" asked Frank, anx.
iously. -Harper's Young People.
-Johnny's Reason. Johnny, don't
think you behave very nicely to Jimmie
Wilkins. You are always interfering
with him. Why do you do it?" said
Johnny's ma. Coz can lick the life
out of him if l want to-" explained
Johnny. Truth.
Just His Luck.-"I hear Simpson
had streak of bad luck, and has been
losing money" "Did he lose much?'
about ten thousand dollars. How
did it happen?" "He fell down coal
hole that was left uncovered and wasn't
hurt. Detroit Free Press.
Other Strugglers Can Sympathize
With Him.-''It's too bad!" walled the
struggling literary man. 81 wrote a
two-column sketch last night, after the
hardest kind of Work, and then lost it.
Most brilliant thing ever did. Would
have made me famous" Cant you
find it anywhere" "Not trace of it.
Clean gone" "How did you lose it,?
"Waked upr'-Chicago Tribune
The late Duke Macmillan, father
of the empress of Austria, was one OF
the most simple and affable of men.
One day as he was travelling on train
between his country residence and
Vienna, he fell into conversation with
a banker from Stuttgart. Are you
going to Wenna?' asked the duke
'tYes; to see " daughter She has just
been married "Ah!" said the duke
"NIine has just married also Was it q
good match?" Excellent! And thai
of your daughter?' "Not bad either.
"My daughter married the banker
Goldschmidt" "Mine the emperor o.
Austria. "-Harper's Bazaar.
One of the wits of the Parliament
House is said to have observed on the oc
casion of Judge Deas' promotion to the
high honor of llnighthood: "The queer
may make George Deas knight, but nj
one will ever make him q gentleman.
Deas was quite able, however, to hold
his own, and he punished the wit:
when they came to make their nader
speeches before him. prisoner at thu
bar" he once said TO an unfortunat,
wretch on whose behalf an infant advo
cate had been feebly urging ''extenuat
ing circumstances" everything tina
your counsel has said in mitigation,
consider to be an aggrayaNon of you
offense,"
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1893-03-30
THE COMING WOMAN.
What Her Position In Society VIII BE
When Her Millennium Comes.

What Her Position In Society VIII BE
When Her Millennium Comes.
Helen NJ. Webster, Phi. d., in a cur
rent topic conference at Lynn, said:
Surely, woman can not be regarded
as occupying an ideal position in So
ciety.
1. Until she shall have become citi-
zen of the country in which She lives, an
equal sharer with the men, both of the
responsibilities and benefits of the ma
ton, the state, the city which she calls
her own.
p Until her education shall be such
as to develop, to the best advantage,
her physical strength and her intellect
ual powers.
8. Until the perfect home shall have
come--the one in which husband and
wife shall join in striving to make real
the noblest ideals of life.
4. Until, finally, society, having given
to woman the opportunity of receiving
the best and most substantial educa-
ton, shall make it both possible and
''proper" for her to engage in any work
which she finds herself capable of do.
ing
Shall we sketch in outline the coming
We man, who is to have the happiness OF
living in that day of larger opportuni
ties and larger responsibilities?
!. She is to be physically strong
2 She will not bow down to conven
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1893-03-30
WASHiNGTON'S AWFUL DIGNITY.
Only One Man Ever Attempted to BE IA
miliar with Him,


President Washington went to the
sessions of congress in a splendid coach,
formed like q hemisphere, with gilt
panels on which were carved Cupids,
flowers and fruits. This gorgeous We
hicle was drawn by six cream-colored
horses superbly caprisoned, and supple
mented by n coachman and two foot
men in white and scarlet livery. The
spectacle drew crowds to the street
whenever the president passed. On
the occasion of receptions President
and Mrs. Washington (she was called
"His Eminence's Consort") sat on the
raised platform like throne and in a
stately way received the salaams of the
people.
The only man who ever attempted to
be familiar with President Washington
was Gouverneur Morris, who, on big
wager that he wouldn't dare walk up
to Washington, slap him on the Shout
der, and Familiarity accost him, went
boldly up in a crowded room to the
dignified George. He didn't slap
George upon the shoulder, however, for
his courage failed him, and he laid his
hand on the president and mildly said:
swell, general, you are looking very
well tonight" Instantly Washington
turned round and gave Morris dark
frown and dagger look from out his
eyes, which made that worthy shrink
into a corner thoroughly embarrassed.
Minneapolis Journal.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1893-03-30
One Dollar Per Year.

tional follies-if, perchance any shall
have survived till then-but reasonable
ness and common sense will be the mo-
tive power of all her actions.
3. She will be hygienically dressed
4. She is to have n well-trained mind'
which shall be able to perform tho
operation Of logical thinking.
Shall we sketch in outline the atti'
tude which the society of that future
day will take toward such womenP
/. 1t will, first OF all, act justly to-
ward her--it will not now indulge, and
now defraud her.
Q. 1t will give her personal independ'
ence in the home and elsewhere.
3. 1t will make her free citizen in
this land of freedom, and sharer OF
all duties in legislative and governing
bodies.
A. 1t will make men and women more
truly companions than ever before,
companions in the fullest and best
sense of the word, in all the relations
of life.
There will be in that day no conven-
tional limits set to woman's sphere;
each individual woman being free
citizen, an independent owner of her
self, living in society which not only
enables her to develop her powers, but
gives the opportunity to use them, will
choose for herself from the whole un'
limited sphere of human activity what
her life work shall be.-Woman's Joui
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1893-03-30
INTERESTING ITEMS.

DR.. MARY WALKER, in advocacy OF
laws allowing women to act on juries,
says that, when Wyoming was a terri
tory and women acted as jurors, not
criminal escaped.
MRS LUELLA Cool, leading dentist
of San Francisco, has been given charge
of the dentistry at the Leland Stanford
university, and will devote one day
in each week to her intercollegiate
work.
MRS FLORA M. KMBALL selected and
superintendent the planting of trees on
seven miles of the streets of National
City, CAL, last spring. Mrs. Kimball is
one of the woman's board Of managers
of the Worlds fair.
CLASSES in nerve training meet every
week at Lasalle seminary, and the
practical results of the training are alb
sence of the American rush prevalent
in some institutions. The young women
are also drilled by Maj Benyon.
THE highest honor as medical stu
dent every won by woman has just
been gained by Miss Louise Aldrich
Blake, the daughter of an English
clergyman, at the London University.
She was double first" in the examina-
tions.
MRS. ELLA GAILLARD is distinguished
for her invention of carriage tele-
phone, a folding fiat-iron, a musical
top, a musical fountain, the eyeless
needle now used by surgeons and
several other original productions OF
more or less value.
TWENTY-FIVE years ago Mrs. Bates,
the daughter Of a Sussex farmer, re.
ceived as gift single lily bulb. When
this had increased to sixteen, they had
outgrown the window and were planted
in the garden. Ten years ago one OF
Mrs. Bates daughter sent some blossoms
to the London market, and was SO sue.
cessful in disposing of them that with
her sisters, she went into the culture OF
these flowers as regular business. The
average weekly product is now coo
dozens, and the Bates lilies are famous
for their beauty and perfection. The
work is all done by women, even to
packing and shipping.
WOMEN are decidedly coming to the
fore in the old world. The London
Times has within the last few months
enlisted the services of several lady con-
tributors; and one of them, Miss
Shaw, is now touring in the various
Australian colonies as special CORE
spondent of the leading organ of the
English press. At Antwerp two ladies
have just been appointed as assistant
clerks of the court for civil cases; whilst
in Sweden and in Denmark the mascu.
line reporters in the press gallery of the
national legislatures have been replaced
by women. Moreover, the official stem
ographer of the lower house of the
Danish parliament is Miss Grundtvig,
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1893-03-30
WIGS FOR YOUNG MEN.
Hair Patches That Are Expensive, But
Can Not he Detected.

Can Not BE Detected.
"rhere are more bald-headed young
men in leading Washington social cir
cles," said the supplier of hirsute def
cencies to the Herald scribe, than peo-
pie would think. But that is because
very little of it is revealed to the Curl
GUS glance. You see, most of the young
men grow bald Immediately above the
forehead, which leaves a triangular
space, or on the center of the head
The first place is very easily concealed
by a bunchswhich looks as natural as
the real thing. These patches are readi-
ly adjusted and may be brushed in any
STYLE They are rather expensive,
though-that is, if man de-
sires something which will COM
pletely battle the attempts of the
suspicious at detection, and cost all the
way from thirty dollars to one hun.
dred and fifty dollars, according to size
and finish. | could name twenty
young men who sport these patches
and whose hair is universally admired
by the fair sex, but of course | wouldn't
Concerning that particular spot on top
of the head in which the hair is espe-
cially fleeing, any number of men
whose ages range between twenty-five
and forty are so decorated. They do
not come so high as the first-named
prices, but are just as easily adjusted
and present the same impenetrable
finish. There are not many of the
complete wigs sold, like there were
fifteen or twenty years ago. In fact,
it is hard to get wig which does not
give itself away, and this is worse than
thin hair OF badness. What is the
color mostly in vogue concerning wigs?
Why, guess dark brown is the most
popular. Most men have that color of
hair. Black-haired and extremely
light-haired men seldom become bald
at an early age; when they do it is
generally ON the center of the head" y
Washington Cd. c. Herald.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1893-03-30
RACE BEAUTY AND INTELLECT.
The Two Seldom Travel In Company
What Causes tho Former.

hhdt NHuNra INC EoTlieT'
Beauty is result of race, of circum-
stances, such as personal freedom and
mode of life and Of continuous diet, not
of intelligence, and still less of the ac-
QUESTION of knowledge, which latter
can only benefit the individual whose
features are fixed past serious change
before study is even begun. A man or
woman inherits his or her face, and
mental habitude, though it may great
ly affect its meaning, can no more alter
its shape than assiduous training can
turn fox terrier into a wiry kind from
8iredale 1t is even doubted by the
million whether continuous education
will produce beauty, whether the
growth of intelligence will even in
ages yield the physical result which we
notice the authors of Utopias always
assume, as if it were a scientifically
demonstrable consequence of the new
society.
The most beautiful black race in
Africa, a tribe in Nyassaland, on whose
looks even missionaries grow eloquent,
are really as ignorant as fishes, and,
though they have discovered the use of
fire, have never risen to the conception
of clothes of any kind. The Otahcitan,
when discovered, was as uncultured as
the Papuan now is; yet the former APP
preached as near positive beauty as the
latter does to positive deformity. The
lScenest race in Asia, as all who know
them assert, the strongest in character,
the Chinese, is decidedly the ugliest Of
semi-cultivated mankind; while the
Hindoo, il sufficiently fed, is, even
when as ignorant as an animal, almost
invariably handsome. The Circassians,
who know nothing, and are rather
stupid than exceptionally intelligent,
are physically a faultless race, far
more SC than the Germans who,
though the best trained people in the
world, display marked commences
of feature, as if the great sculptor,
nature, had used good clay, but taken
no trouble about the modelling. Some
of the very ablest among them belong
to the tlat-nosed, puffy checked, loose
Tipped variety. The l,eenest race in
the world, and probably the most sus-
ceptible of culture-the Jew-presents
no type of beauty, being usually at
once hook-nosed and fabby-cheeled,
though in physique, as in thought, that
race occasionally throws out transcen-
dant examples. The trained Arabs of
Egypt, who seem to possess poor brains,
and of course have no education, are
often extraordinarily handsome; while
in 1860 the grandest head in Asia, a
head which every artist copied as his
ideal of Jove, belonged to an Arab
householder, who, outside his trade,
knew nothing. No men of culture
would pretend, in mere perfectness of
form, to rival the old Greek athletes,
who Intellectually were probably ami
mails; or the BerserlIars, who were for
the most part only hard-drinking SOL
diers. Chicago Herald.
Savannah courier. (Savannah, Tenn.) 1885-1979, 1893-03-30
THE SPINSTER'S PL ACE.
She Is Now at Home In College or Works
shop, store or Studio.

She Is Now at Home In College or Work.
shop, store or Studio.
The memoir of Mrs. Monteith, a wom'
an of high social position and large
wealth in New York during the early
part of this century, contains letter
written by her during a commercial
panic which threatened her income.
She says:
"If we lose our property, / and Maria
cher daughter) are utterly helpless.
We are not competent to teach; we can
not sew well; we are too often Ill to I'M
dertake manual labor; and there is, as
you know, no way open for woman
to earn her bread but as a housemaid, q
seamstress, or teacher"
In a convention of working-women
held in New York last spring scores OF
occupations were represented, each rep
utable, healthy and lucrative.
In an address made recently to the
graduating class of one OF our colleges
for women, the speaker declared that
all the arts, more than half OF the
sciences. and almost every known
branch of trade, are now occupied by
women with more or less success.
Let now the woman who is without
husband or child" he urged, think
that the world has no work for her:
while spinsters teach astronomy and
mathematics in our highest schools, and
fill every standing ground down to the
place of brakemen and blacksmiths."
1t is not only as bread-winners that
the world has made room for women's
skill and energy during this century.
Countless educational, social and CHART.
able enterprises and organizations fur
nish employment for them.
The young woman, fifty years ago,
who was unmarried, was forced to con-
fine her industry and talents to the
limits of her own household or village.
Now, without losing single feminine
grace, she can take large and active
part in the worlds work.
Yet we would remind our readers
that in thus charging the field, of wom-
ans labor and in educating her for it,
we should always remember that the
chief work given to her by nature and
God is that of home-keeper, a wife
and mother. Youths Companion.