Frostburg mining journal. [volume] (Frostburg, Md.) 1871-1913, 1893-12-02
ST. PETER AT THE GATE.

St Pctcr stood guard at the golden gate
with solemn micu and an air sedate,
When up to tn" top of the golden stair
A man and woman ascending there.
Applied for admission. They came ana
stood
Before ST. Peter ST. great and good.
In hopes the city of Peace to win
And asked st. Peter to let them in.
The woman tail, and lank, and thin,
With Il scraggN brardlet upon her chin.
The man was short and thick, and stout,
His stomach was built so 1t rounded out.
HIS face was pleasant. and all the while
II" wore Il kindly and genial smile
The chuirS in the distance the echoes woke,
And the man kept still while the woman
spoke
I'VE two come hithrr. bcseeching thee
TO let us enter the heavenly land,
And play our harpS with the angel band.
OF me. 81. Peter there is no doubt
There's nothing from heaven to bar me out,
I've been TO meetings three times week,
And almost always I'd rise and speak.
I've told the sinners about the day
When they'd repent their evil way;
| have told my nrighbors, l have told them
Bout Adam and Eve, and the Primal fall:
I've shown them what they'd have To do
If they'd pass in with the chosen few;
I've marked their path of duty clear
Laid out the plan for their whole career,
I've talked and talked to 'em, loud and
long.
For my lungs are good and my voice is
strong.
The gate of heaven is open to me;
But my old man, | regret to say,
Hasn't walked in exactly the narrow way
He smokes and he swears, and grave faults
he got.
And / don't know whether he'll pass or
He never would pray with an earnest vim.
or go to revival, or join in hymn,
So | had to leave him in sorrow there
While |, with the chosen. united In prayer.
He ate what the pantry CHANGED to afford.
While |. in my purity, sang to the Lord;
And AI. if Cucumnsrs We're al II, ne ne got mo-,
But oh. st. Peter. | love him so!
10 the pleasures of heaven please let him
I've done cnough-a saint I've been.
Won't that atone? Can't you let him in?
By my, grim gospel ! know tits so
That the unrcpcntant must fry below;
lut isn't there some way you can see.
That he may enter who's dear to me?
It's a narrow gosDel by which l pray.
OF coaxing, or foolng, or bribing you
So that their relations can ambe through
An, And say, st: Peter; it seems Z, aG,t to , me
You ought to stand by that opening there
And never sit down in that easy chair, chair:
But don't like the way your whskcrs are
They're cut too wide and outward toss.
They'd look better narrower cut straight
We'll, we must be going our crowns to win'
ST. Peter sat quiet and StrOkrd his stan;
But, spite of bis office he had to laugh;
Then said, with a, fiery gleam in his eye,
And then he arose in his stature tall,
And pressed button upon the wall,
And said 10 the imp who answered the bell.
Escort this lady around to hell"
The man stood stll as 4 piece Of stone
Stood sadly, gloomily there alone,
\ lifelong, settled idea he had
That his wife was good and he was bad.
He thought If the woman went down below
That he would certainly have to go
That if she went to the regions dim
There wasn't Il ghost of a show for him.
SLOWLY he turned. by habit bent,
10 follow wherever the woman went.
ST. Peter, standing on duty there,
Observed that the top of his head was bare.
lie called the Gentleman back, and saiH;;
Thirty years with weary sgm:
and then he th"ushtfTI!Yy My, added 1 , "Whyw
lie raised his hand and scratched his
Then, seeming different thought to take,
Slowly half to himself, he Spake:
'''rhirty years with that woman there?
no wonder the man hasn't any hair!
Swearing is wicked Smokes not & good 10
He smoked and Sworc-l should think he
Thirty years with that tongue ! ne, $" ssharp'
4 icwcled harp with golden string.
Good sir, pass in where the angels sing!
Gabriel, give him seat alone
one with Il cushion-up near the throne!
Cali mp some angels to play their best
Let him enjoy the music and rest.
See that on finest ambrosia he feeds
He's had about all the hell he needs.
II isn't just hardly the thing to do
TO roast him on earth and the future, too
They gave him a harp with golden. strings,
A glittcrng robe with pair OF wings,
And he said as he entered the Realm OF
Day.
''WclI, this beats cucumber, anyway"
And the scriptures had come to pass:
"The, last shall be first and the first shall
be last"