The McCook tribune. (McCook, Neb.) 1886-1936, 1893-09-22
ALWAYS INVENTING.
AN INGENIOUS MAN WHO Is USUALLY
DOING SOMETHING.

Had It not been that my family went
out of town a short time ago and leftme
homeless and Respondent, l would never
have been able to write this story. AS it
was was won over by the entreaties of a
friend and went to live with him and his
little family-for awhile.
1t pleases me to meet geniuses. I like
70 touch shoulders with men of ideas,
and that is just what this friend of mine
might be labeled-a man of ideas. did
not know it before I went to his house,
but then / discovered he is an inventor.
What he invents is immaterial; suf-
fee it to say ne invents in the full sense
of the word. If he works out an idea,
and when the model is perfected it doesn't
do what he thought it would, he makes
it do something else.
It's a double back action style of in
venting that is destined to fill long felt
wants or leave an aching void. The in
ventor is not to blame for either of these
happenings, his business being exclu-
sively to invent.
We We're sitting in his dining room the
first evening I was at his house. The
servant had just cleared the dinner table,
and my friends wife was looking after
the youngsters and keeping their nurse
out of mischief.
George was looking intently at one of
the gas tips, and his brain machinery was
grinding exceeding fine material, Icould
see.
well, what is it," I asked, looking up
and around for a stray June bug OF some
other bird of plumage.
"Tm just thinking" George said rather
dreamily, 81 a improve on that gas
tip. I'll do it. I've got it sure" Then
he began drawing things on a piece of
paper that looked like deformed church
steeples. He said they were gas tips.
For a day or two George ate very lit
tie. I afterward learned this is COM
mon with inventors, as they are able to
go for weeks at a time without touching
a morsel. Their brains stop working
when their owner eats. There's no mon
ey in eating except for the dealers il
edibles.
When George came back to earth and
food, he had q model in his pocket. 1t
was the tangible outcome of his think
ing.
"Isnt that splendid" he said, with
ecstasy, holding it up before me. His
black eyes glistened.
eyes, it's very pretty" Ireplied. "Will
it work?'
"You bet it'll work. The user will
get a large and steady fame, with no
waste of gas and with one-third the usual
pressure. I'll show you"
George got up and adjusted it to the
chandelier. He got out matches and
then turned out the remaining gas jet.
Fully IA matches were struck while we
sat in the dark. I held my breath be-
cause my hold on solemnity BETTING the
occasion was fast loosing.
He said many things which I could
not be led to repeat. The sanctity of 9
private home should not be invaded. It
was his right to say things, as he paid
the rent.
The thing did not work. I could see
that, even though it was dark. He re-
lighted the gas and sat down. You can
never tell what an inventor is going to
do, so I said nothing. Oh, I believe 1
did ask him if there was an opening in
the end for the gas to ooze through. I'm
not sure, though, but I know George
didn't answer.
He finally secured a couple of feet of
small rubber hose that he had used in
another experiment and fastened the gas
tip on n end. He thought perhaps
there was an obstruction that water
would clear away. The other end of the
hose he attached to afaucet.
I stood by like any well behaved in
vited guest. George turned the water,
and it shot through in first rate shape.
The fact was the gas tip was a splendid
sprinkler. Even Georges wife acknowl-
edged that, and she gave up acknowledge
ing anything but his inventive failures
years ago.
"By gracious!' George exclaimed,
isn't that a dandy sprinkler? I'll get
that patented" Then he laid it down.
1t was the next evening Georges wife
said that her expensive music box was
out of order and would not play. Tie
valuable instrument was put on the Ia
BILE, and George peered into it for about
five minutes.
mo wonder; 1 see what's the matter
George remarked as he left the room.
He returned with four or five nipple
ments that for all I know belonged to a
kitchen range.
He unfastened a couple of screws and
then-yes, and then! The case was full
of snarled up springs, things that looked
like comb teeth and various odds and
ends that one would never suspect hay
ing been within 10 miles of the house a
minute before. Tears ran down the
cheeks of Georges wife and dropped in
on the cylinders.
"What are you trying to do-spoil and
rust the works." George asked. Then he
dickered and dickered until he had
about a bushel of pieces of machinery
strewn about. Georges wife retired,
and I fell asleep on a lounge. Ny host
worked until 6 o'clock in the morning
and then gave it up.
l left the next day. 1t was impossible
for me to remain longer in the house