The Portland daily press., 1893-07-10
TWO JOHN ALLEN STORIES.
The Funny Congressman's illustrations of
Negro Wit.
Indianapolis Journal

Congressman John Allen, the bubbling
humorist from Mississippi, is in great
favor in Washington circles. for he gem
orally has bright story at his tongues
end. He was RECALLING crowd OF friends
with some Southern stories, and among
them was the one which follows, one of
the few stories of Aliens that has not
gotten into print:
Allen had employed on his place an old
negro servant, who in times before the
war was the property of the Congress-
mans father. Old Uncle Rufus suffered
| frequent and ungoyernable attacks of
| kleptomania attacks that seemed to be
| beyond all remedy. He was arrested
time and time again for stealing articles
| from the place of his employer. Mr..
Allen finally grew tired of attempting to
reform his old servant. and he had him
arrested for stealing big piece of side
meat from the plantation storehouse. 1t
was the intention to have the servant
serve out brief time in the county Jail
for the offence, with the hope that the
Imprisonment would check him in his
habit of stealing. The old man pleaded
hard with the young Mahstah' to be re-
leased, and recalled all the favors and
kindnesses he had shown Mr.. Allen when
that dignitary was still boy. Allen be-
gan to weaken on the line of this argu-
ment, and was about ready to release the
servant on the strength of his past SER
vices. He turned to Uncle Rufus
with:
''Now, Uncle Ruff, if you will bring
back that side meat, and promise me on
the Bible that you will never steal an
other thing off this plantation, will let
you go. Furthermore, you will have to
sign q paper promising on your solemn
honor never to steal again.
| Uncle Rufus hesitated for a moment.
''Mahs' john" said he, Use willin' to
glib you back de side meat. Yes, sab,
I'll do dat, I'll do dat-but now, look
yeah, Mahs' John-you can't 'spect me
to sign away my rights
Aliens generous ways made him very
popular with the old-time negroes, and
frequently he was called upon, without
expectation of compensation, to defend
them III suits for pilfering. On one oc
: casion colored preacher of the neigh
: borhood was on trial for stealing some
poultry from neighbor. The preachel
protested his innocence, and Allen made
: very strong defence for him. Tit
, evidence, however, was very strons
against the parson, and Mr.. Aller
saw that his client would probabl.
be convicted. He whispered to hin
after the case had gone to the jur.
and told him to prepare to NEE
the worst The preacher was shrewt
: old fellow, but he could not just see how
! he was going to get out of the scrape
The jury was out only a few minutes AM
the preacher lost all hope, After tn
Jury had taken their seats and the fore
4 man was beginning to read the verdic
the old preacher jumped up from his sea
and bawled out:
!. ''Yo' Honah, rse."
9 ''Sit down. said the Court, and turn
: ing to the attorney. "What does tn
prisoner mean?"
0 '.Yo' Honor" persisted the prisoner
e 81 move dat dis cot do adjourn
''Well," replied the Court somewha
u amused, show do you expect the Coul
to adjourn?''
O Because continued the prisoner 6
=, motion to adjourn is always in ordaf
sahn