The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1893-10-23
FUN In 4 COURT ROOM
The Way Justice Hansee
Dispenses Justice in
Hoboken.

Ken to while a way his vacation DAYS at
the White city. Justice of the Peace
Hansee has occupied the chair OF dis
penser OF justice aud law in Hoboken
Police Court. And noticeably has the
attendance at the court sessions in
creased. for the justice is an en-.
tertaiDing man in HIS way. and can force
his auditors TO something resembling q
perpetuil smile. Although the court
room Il not, perhaps, filed with the aura
OF Judicial equity, still the Justice fills
the chair nicely, and that's of some I'm.
p%ortance.
Justice Hansse wears a beard, Of the
snow white, drooping willow vari ETY.,
that tutnbieso over his chiu like INTO the
manner 10 which the waters fall DER
the Cataract of Lodore; that Is,
IN a promiscuous sort of fashion. The
Justice chews candy. sometimes pepper
mint. sometimes lemon. He halls from
the back woods of York State and con.
ducts a pension attorneys office Ia Ho-
bokeu and the aforementioned back.
woods. He wears a high bat of the wiuay
month variety aud a long old style Prince
Albert coat.
In court the Justice presents an inter-
esting aspect. His hands form q promi-
nent part of the scenery. They move
arOund on the top OF the dssk, grabbing
pens, papers aud occasionally the beard.
They're Eot very small ones, either.
When the policeman brings 10 the
prisoner, the "Judge"-he prefers that
1usts his goggles. He vie VS. the prisoner
from the top story down and then CON-
mences the int ,rrogatiou.
The Justice seldom asks for names.
HASN'T any use for them. Once in a while
ne puts them on warrants to fill up the
dotted line. Never wants addresses. The
policeman a huuta around for the man,
sometimes talks pleasantly, again he
roars. II tie prisoner fails to compre-
bend the weight of the Justices REMARKS,
ne is set down for a crook nj gets a few
days in Jail.
ASSAULTED a woMAN's ARM.
Ihe ruin took the starch out OF Justice
Hansee's capillary adornments this
morning. but it had no ap%preciable eff,
lect upon his dispensation of Law In the
Hoboken Police Court. Into his ugust
presence there were uShered a half doz an
IrauszresSors of law and orler it its
mider forms. Fred Dorser was charged
with having wreuched the arm OF his
boarding mistress. Kate Seyler, OF No. 1879
Willow avenue. Dorser is forty years of
age. The Justice summoned Kate to his
SIDE He entered into a friendly conver-
sation with her. aud by inches got her
story. A dispute had arisen between
Kate aud Fred, tud the latter said she,
grabbed her arm causing 1t to be twisted
aroun aud disturbing The tentons.
"Dorser, you are charged with assault
and natt ~ on the woman's ar H." said
the Court with awful dignity. But Fred
German and could not understand
the Courts English. A young boy inter.
preted bne Justices charge.
Fred did not make a denial, but said the
woman han Attempted to JAKE mouey
from his pocket. He tried TO prevent it,
but she grabbed a dollar. He said they
were engaged. At this q pleasant smile
overspread the Courts face and the room.
grew lighter.
MAXIM love. eha g that the way TO
do itf" he a ,ked. ea4g $50.
Fred laid he paid rent for the woman
n sne was ungrateful. The Justice
held him for trial by the G and jury.
ADVICE TO EMMA. %
Emma Fogefty was summoned to the
bar. She was a blushing maid of twenty
three anu lives at No. 24l Twelfth street
Drunk was the charge. The Court felt
her hnmili1tion more than she did herself
by several shades. He grew lenieut right
OIL the start and by the time he got
he had won for himself one OF
sweetest smiles. He let her &c,
although she is an hapitual drunkard,
Hi. salutation to her was: n4N5
"Wsll. Emma, what's the trouble this
morning? Same as usuals Been
tiRhta" aiU h.s
No answer. a. al4
"Oh. dear, Emma, I'd rather have nv
right baud chopped clean Off than to see
you tight. But you ain'6 past redemp.
ton. Emma. no you amt. Now go and
amend your bad ways. For goodness
sake, Emma, il you was my daughter
you'd wish you never got full. Don't
rush the GROWER"
Let the meu rush the GROWER, but
don't you do it for 'em. Now be a good
girl, Emma, for / feel for you, and 90"
The Justice was thanked.
OLD MAN IN A FIX.
ANY more?" asked Hausee of CAP.
"One poor old man." was the ,e ,ponse.
My old man, began the Court.
you're in a fix"
Tnen Cap. and the Judge interviewed
each ether on what had best be done With
him. He had two sons, but neither
would support him. Their morals ought
support him." calculated the Court.
but Cap. thought money and not morals
had the most to do about it. You see."
said the Court to Cap, g there's three
bad things about it. Ones his age, the
others the weather, aud them two with
his sons who won't support him is the
three"
"That's So" responded Cap.
1t was finally decided to hold him until
Miller can find out what to
do with him.