The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1893-10-22
sAID THE DEMOCRATIC GIRL.
And what She said Begot Talk About III
PhIIosophY Of Excluslvcncss.

And what She Said Begot Talk About the
Philosophy OF Exc'usivcness.
Doesn't It crisp your nerves when nam ma
saws she visits only thirty families ?" ask ed
the democratic girl She was hanging over a
large cut glass dish OF chocolates made by a
famous French confectioner. a fact probably
responsible for the gallicsm In which her
question was put She had been eating the
chocolates indiscrimlnatey until safety had
put her in a condition to make q thoughtful
choice She was making 1t with the silver
tongs poised In her hand ready to nip her se-
lected bonbon.
The aristocratic girl to whom the remark
was addressed rolled her calm eyes toward
the dem ocratic girl In a way expressive OF
surprise but revised what she would have said
to anybody else into:
mo. not since 1t makes It's effect. There Is
lustre cast on tho thirty families as families
worthy to be visited. and lustre reflected on
your mother as one who. with the power to
select. has chosen those presumably her peers.
and fares not forth from that circle. however
centrfugally entreated."
Yes. yes - said the democratic girl. ex-
citedly throwing away the tongs. It's the
Sous-eniemdu OF entreaty withstood that really
gives the phrase its value. and that's what
crisps my nerves. It's SO inhumanly narrow
lies not only out OF our houses. but out OF our
brains and consciousness. Births. deaths. and
marriages.. quarrels. business partnerships
and disgraces. when they happen among the
people we visit. are considered. looking be-
lore and after; but the same events among
outsiders. no matter how hcartrending or
how curious tho circumstances. are lust like
to exclusives. Fi,ally they, harden into
n worse mental attitude yet: lspses against
good morals and good taste i! committed
by people on their visiting list. are reasoned
about, perhaps gossired about; but certainly
on the part Of outsiders are accepted as tho
natural morals and the natural bad taste OF
n girl OF sense. who doesn't accept in the spirit
all the things we have to accept In the letter.
wh l. e ps tho hsty If hs world in
look grave. Like the democratic girl with her
ments. but more about her good looks than
her Intelligent skepticism. SO she appreciated
The objections to the people we do not and
pause. are that they speak strange English.
don't return them. make engagements and
don't keep them il 1t happens to be incon-
yenient: snub their parents or wives or hus-
bands cornm poDmO. ask personal questions,
make personal comm ent. and reveal In general
conversation details that can least spare the
current for an accusation p
'Y-e-e-s." admitted the democratic girl
grudginEly.r emeln berng n much soug hit aft or
young man who did not answer notes when it
didn't suit him to do SO. and All equally fash.
ionable married pair who settled their differ
ences in vigorous language In the presence OF
their guests.
But own that the infelcity Of their objec-
tionableness lies very largely in tho ear that
hears them" the aristocratic girl went on.
mistaking the nature Of the democratic girls
demuE IL a person has been trained TO re-
gard the things I've mentioned AZ distinot
breaches OF dee9rnm. OR Whatever you choose
do the direct opposite but to regard the doing
Of 1t as !undam entail. why. II she gees out from
the circle that thinks and acts us she does into
one that violates all her traditions and inner
constituencies. she will be overwhelmingly un-
comfortable. So she will be II she lete one OF
the outer barbariaDs come galumphing into
her circle. Hence eXclusiveness"
And it's nice" admitted the democratic
girl. especially il you feel little III: but. Tor
lifetime. depressing. For ideas and gem
erosity and sympathy. give me the outer bar
barians. unchaperon-d. unGfammatica. en-
terprsing. luxury loving unread except tor
the newspapers untaught except for the
theatre. but intensely human. with the keenest
sense of humor. the sincerest outspokenness.
the most del ightful contempt for bosh-hy-
Locrsy. you know. No. We never could visit
them but think they have their consultations
for that lamity,"