The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-12-02
Select gtorp.
OUR EXPECTATIONS
From Belgravia.

HOW very unfortunate
"How confoundedly annoying
The above remarks were made by my
wife and myself respectively one bright
September morning as we sat at breakfast
in the dining room of our tiny, old-fash-
ioned cottage at Lowthorpe. Before us
each lay an open letter; and it was the
contents of these letters-individually and
collectively-which had called forth the
remarks set down above.
To be more explicit Elias letter was
from her uncle, Gregory Carper, signify
ing his intention of paying us visit on
the following Tuesday. My letter was
from my uncle, Simon Finicker, saying he
intended paying us visit on the following
Tuesday.
Nothing particularly alarming in that,
you think
Wait moment. Old Gregory Carper
was a most eccentric and irascible indi-
vidual of reputed fabulous wealth, who had
more than once distinctly stated that it was
his intention to make his only niece (my
wife) his heiress. Old Finicker, my moth
ers brother, was also rich in this worlds
goods, and it was generally understood that
|, Charles Danvers, was to be his heir.
And between these old men there was a
deadly feud. The quarrel had taken place
six months ago, and each uncle, after CIV
ing us an exhaustive catalogue of the ene-
my's enormities, had sworn in turn that if
we. Ella and Charles Danvers, exchanged
words, letters, or visits with the said enemy
in future we should be ostracised by the
remaining uncle forever.
Now, for more reasons than one. Ella
and l looked upon this as a serious con-
tingency; and | regret to say we had re-
course to duplicity, We gave each uncle
to understand that we held the other as
the scum of the earth (if we didn't exactly
say so, we implied it,; and, so far we had
kept on tolerably friendly terms with both.
We called our baby-wc had baby
Gregory and Simon by turns. He had
been christened Gregory Simon in the
presence of both uncles, just week before
the fatal quarrel took place. Poor little
soul! / used to shudder when | thought
of his debut with such a name at the pub
lie school where his mother already talked
Of sending him.
I offer no excuse for our objectionable
conduct. | acknowledge that | played the
part of a mean, abject sneak. But | trust
the reader will see that under existing cir
cumstanccs the projected simultaneous
visits of these two uncles was, to say the
least of it, awkward.
However, there was no help for it. To
write and put either off would offend the
put-off one almost as mortally as to allow
the dreaded meeting to take place.
'sThere will be a fine scene" observed
grimly, after a short silence. "By Jove 4!
there will.
Ella stirred her coffee abstractedly; and
l stuck my spoon vindictively through
the shell of my third egg, with vague
wish that were inficting corporeal injury
on either Objectionable relative.
"Charlier' said my wife, in piteous
tones, when some few minutes had elapsed,
s'what shall we do p
"Ask me something easier, my DEAR l
replied, gloomily.
'It is so awkward in every way" she
went on "Jane does not return from her
holiday until Wednesday, (Jane was our
housemaid) sand cooks being so deaf
makes her so stupid. And your uncle is
so fdgety and particular" she added
did not reply, but reread both letters
silently. No, there was no mistake, both
uncles were coming on Tuesday. Mr..
Carper proposed three-day's visit; Mr..
Finicker intended starting early on We'd
nesday morning to attend cattle show
some twenty miles from Lowthrope He
would come down, he (my uncle) said by
the 5:15 from Waterloo.
GAS usual, Mr.. Carper does not mention
the train he intends coming down BY" l
observed dryly. "There only remains, as
climax, that they should both elect to
come BY the 5:l5.'