New Ulm review. (New Ulm, Brown County, Minn.) 1892-1961, 1893-12-06
SOME CAPITAL STORIES.
Anecdotes Of Some Of the Most Famous
Orators Of CONGRESS.

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! A laughable story was told by the Hon
w. j. Talbert Of South Carolina, says
the Washington correspondent of the
Baltimore News. He said he had list
ened with great deal of earnestness to
speeches on both sides of certain ques-
ton. He had listened so seriously and
patiently that sometimes he had been in
the position of the little boy whose
mother, in making his first pair Of trous-
ers, put the front to the rear. The little
boy started for school the next morning
and walked cheerfully along until he
looked down and discovered the situation,
| when he burst out crying and whimpered:
| II don't like these pants; don't know
whether I'm going to school or going
back home"
The South Carolinian's statement was
received with great laughter.
Not long after, in referring to the des-
peratc effort of the bankers to choke off
| the silver men, Mr.. Talbert said that
charity forbade that he should say that
congress was Influenced by their action.
Every man, however, could think if he
did not speak. To illustrate his idea he
said that down in South Carolina there
was man who hired lawyer once to
conduct case in court. AS the lawyer
was not talking exactly to suit him, he
got up to make few remarks himself.
The judge, of course, made HIM take his
seat. He got up again and the judge
made him take his seat again. A third
and fourth time this happened, and finally
the old farmer got up and said: "Well,
judge, if you won't let me talk, won't
you let me think?"
''Why certainly" replied the judge.
"Well, judge" he SAID, II think you
and all these lawyers are a great set of
rascals.'
In referring to the allegations that the
Sherman act had caused bedevilment in
the country, MIR. Talbert said that the
passage Of that act reminded him Of
something that happened in North Caro-
lima just after the war. Gen. Fitzpatrick
came through the town going home. An
old Union man named Roark, who had
very fine horse, went out to meet the
general. He rode up to him and thought
Fitzpatrick knew him.
Good morning, general he said Kill
patrick returned the salutation rather
gracefully. Then tuning to one of his
men, who was riding a very poor horse,
he said: "Get off that horse" Address
ing Roark, he continued "Get down
off your horse.' Roark did as he was
told, and then Fitzpatrick said: "Change
your saddles.' Turning to Roark again.
he said: "You get on the poor horse
Roark did as he was commanded, and
Fitzpatrick started off. Turning toward
linn, Roark said: "Can 1 speak to you?'
eyes," replied the general, "talk quick:
I must be going.'
WELL" said Roark, 81 just want to
say to you that I have been swapping
horses forty years, but this is the first
time that I ever traded without had
airy say in it."
So it was with the people. They had
TO swap their money for gold. and they
had no say at all because of the legisla-
ton which was forced upon them.
In referring to Mr.. Barriers speech,
Mr.. Talbert said that it reminded him of
the man who was inquiring of a little
boy standing on the road the way to a
certain house. The little fellow replied:
''Well, you go this way half a mile to
another road then take that road and go
about quarter of mile and you will
find a blind path which will lead you to
swamp; then go up into the middle Of
the swamp until you find tremendous
big tree; then go up into the fork Of
that tree, and then if you amt lost am
dot rotted If I amt Dutchman."
"That," continued Mr.. Talbert, sis
about like the talk Of my friend from
Ohio. I tried to follow him, but he first
took me into swamp, then into the
fork of tree, and finally I was COM
pletely LOST
Mr.. Talbert in his speech said that he
had never written a speech, as he did
not like to be bothered with notes. He
undertook to make one with notes once
and got them all stirred up together and
made complete failure. It reminded
! I,;,,, - ,,,I,4 Io5 no,,nopo1 70 Tho old