davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
News Items.

A blizzard and heavy snow storm pre-
vailed throughout Manitoba on Friday OF
last week.
The 2O00 miners at Dubois, Pa, decided
to accept the 10 per cent. reduction and
went to work.
The Rev. Dr. Charles 2, Deems, Pastor
of the Church of the Strangers, in New
York city, died on Saturday, aged u years
By the recent coal miners strike in
England loss of over S150,000,000 was
the result, as all kinds of business were
injured
Mormon leaders from the United States
have made arrangements for the purchase
of :. OOO. 900 acres of land in the State OF
chihuahua, Mexico.
Mrs. Elizabeth 0aksmith, of Patchogue,
Long Island, widely known poetess and
lecturer, died last week at Hollywood,
North Carolina, aged 81 years.
The Union Coal Company's colleries at
Shamokin, Pa, shut down on Saturday,
for an indefinite period, throwing 1000
men and boys out of employment,
On Saturday 1000 employees of the Lee
| high Valley Railroad struck. All mail
trains are manned by the men but no freight
or accommodations trains are running.
Welcome H. Hathaway pleaded guilty
to indictments charging him with taking
800 900 from the Fall River Mass
banks by forged warehouses receipts and
other methods.
An infant child of Joseph Hance, Of
Passaic, New jersey, fell from third
story window on Sunday. An examlna-
ton by a physician showed that the child
was absolutely uuhurt.
| On Saturday the final test Of the cruiser
Columbia was made. She made record
of 22.81 knots per hour, beating the
worlds record. At one time she was run
ming at the rate of 25 knots per hour.
i A wind storna at San Francisco on Friday
of last week did much damage to the
wharves and shipping. At the Mid Win
ter Exposition grounds a circular building,
being erected for the Hawaiian Panorama,
was blown down.
A chemical analysis of the contents of
the stomach of Judge Donahue, of Adams
county, Pa, who died suddenly recently,
proves, it is asserted, that death was caused
BY strychnine poisoning. The authorities
are investigating the matter.
A fire, believed to have been of incen-
cendiary origin, at Keno, Newago county,
Mich, Saturday night, destroyed over
5000. 900 worth of lumber belonging to
VIM. Peters, of Toledo, Ohio. The in
surance amounted to less than $4,000.
The strike ut the Wilkesbarre (Pa.) Lace
Mill, one of the largest in the United
States, has practically ended, the men
agreed to resume work at a reduction, with
the understanding that full wages will be
paid as soon as market can be found f0F
the goods manufactured
The large brick barn of the late Jacob
B. Bishop, on the Yellow Brooches creek,
in Monaghan township, York county, Pa,
was destroyed by FIRE, on Saturday, together
with all the contents. including 20 tons of
hay, lot of grain, produce and farming
utensils. The loss is estimated at 81 900.
on which there is an insurance Of 81 600.
A lot of young cattle, valued at $500, we're
] saved.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25


On Sundays trains viii leave Hilen Station at ~
IN. and go p. M, Westminster lll2 q. and III
p. m, arriving at Union Bridge at ll.i5 a. m and
450 p. m. Leaves Brnceville 6.25 Il. m. and Union
Bridge at 637 a. m. and 3.5s p. m, Westminster I'll
a. IN. and 4.2S p m, arriving at Hilen Station al
910 a. M. and els p. m.
Frederick Division Pennsylvania Railroad, daily
except Sunday.-Trains for Frederick leave Bruce
vile at 1882 and Isl and CLIP. M. Trains of
Taneytown, Littlestown and York leave Brueevile
at 95S a. m and 3.45 p. M.
Through trains for Hanover and Gettysburg ant
points on Baltimore and Harrisburg Division leave
Baltimore daily, except Sunday at I'D a. m and
$50 p N. Through cars for Gettysburg and inter
mediate points leave Baltimore also daily except
Sunday at 1905 a.
Passengers for and from Cherry Run, Williams
port. P. V. and intermediate points, from and for
stations east of Hagerstown, change at HagerStoWn,
diminishing R. R.-East-Leave EmmitsbgIg;
daily. esseoPt Sundays. at 100 aud .Oou u n BUD
255 and 5,45 p. m. arriving at Rocky Ridge al 81
and 1880 a. m. and 3.25. and 6i5 p m. West leave
Rocky Ridge at SIG and 1857 a. ~ and SD and e..
p. m; arriving at Emmitsburg at S56 and ll07 a. In
and 400 and 6.59 p. m,
Orders for baggage calls can be left at Tickle
Office, No. 205 L. Baltimore street. Baltimore.
]. NJ. HOOD, Genl. Manager
oct7 B, Il. GRIswoLD. Genl. Passenger Agent
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
GPECIAL SALE
- OF
Queensware, Housekeeping
Goods and Groceries
For the next thirtY DAYS.

We have received our full Spring Stock
and are offering special drives wholesale and
retail ON the following goods Il crate Porce-
lain Ware, l crate Colored ware, crate 2nds
Granite Ware; crate ends Porcelain Ware.
Special prices on Cutlery and Silverware'
Tubs, Buckets, &c.
Our drug department is stocked with fresh
goods; all brands of patent medicines. We
are sole manufacturers of Grayson's Horse
and Cattle Powders.
F. q. MILLER Il co,
mar41y Near depot, Westminster, Nd.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
For the Coming Man.

Why should you not take the same
pride in the dress and appearance OF
your little fellows as in your own ?
Stylish knee Pants Suits and Over
coats at $3.50, 50 and $5. Over fifty
choice styles at SIS from which to
choose.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
Furore in Furnishings.

This department. shows q much
larger stock than the combined
efforts of any two stores, at prices
that make competitors bow their
heads in shame. Comfortable Under
wear soc. per garment. Our Match
lesss Dress Shirt at SOC. is wonder
of quality.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
CEvEN MAGAZINES IN ONE.
= ST. NICHOLAS,

FOR YOUNG FOLKS.
..,v;aa A,vate,, now Merged in it, Enlarged by 70
additional pages in the volume.
Everything illustrated
oral, r,,blicattons for boys and girls st. Nicholas
conducted BY Mary Mapes Dodge IS ,sd ~
the best 1t has been praiseo ~ sIs Is unpre
ppedented among magazines for young io5 6s
shining with the number for November, los9 3, ~ .e
sniaroed nv the addition of about 700 pages III lie
vninme and for 1854 it will have the greatest
program in its history, including
A NATURAL HISTORY SERIES,
hrll;antlv illustrated describing the quadrupeds OF
North America in popular Way ~ II National
- 1''' "ToM SAWYER ABROAD"
Serial Story by Mark Twain, in which the great
humorists famous creations Ms assnrn ghemisphere
lin flying machine); series on
AMERICAN AUTHORS,
bv Rrander Matthews, setting forth in clear and
simple form the main 3iog[aphnc mean in american
literature, including Irving, cooper bIyalt' ma"
thorne Emerson, Lowell, ETC.;
STORIES OF INDIA,
by Rudyard Kipling. When Rudyard hipilg MSS
boy in India he used TO read St Nleholas, anu ~,
now he takes his turn at bringing delightt 70 me
thousands of young folk who read 1t today ne s
written for St. Nicholas series OIL renalkaG Gt,
stories of boy and girl life in the jungle anu WIN
animals.
aREcoLLECTIoNs OF WILD LIFE"
By Dr. Charles Eastman, full blooded SiouA
Indian, and graduate of a white man 5 conese
1Dartmouthe description of Indian life'-ln camp
and on the war path,-deseribed from the INSIDE.
A novelty in literature.
PAPERS ON THE GOVERNMENT
"How Money is Made" Qhe Mint. "How the Trea-
snry is Guarded How the Government PIom9 3te
Ingenuity" (the Patent Office, The Dead Letter !
Ohice, with the West Point Cadets" How Armies
Talk to Each Other" Life on Man OF war, etc
SERIAL STORIES
o., uo,vor5 pv1a Frances Courtenay BAYLOR. James
Otis, Molly Elliot Seawell and the
Author of Lady Jane"
THE FAMOUS brownies"
by Palmer Cox, will also be feature ofSt Nicholas
Are you going to haye-St Nicholas in your home
in 81? New subscribers should begin with No
yember The price of st. Nicholas is $500 a year.
Everything in it is illustrated. Subscribe through
booksellers and newsdealers, or remit to the pub
fishers by chnck- draft.Iaohlos, o. gs'fre7
DON'T miss the Christmas number.
THE CENTURY CO.
50 East 27th Street, New York.
nolS Write for the Miniature ST. Nicholas, free
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
A Hurrah in Hats.

We come to the front with stock
of Fall Hats absolutely correct in
every detail of shape and color.
Mems fine Derbys sl.5o, exclusive
hatters, $3.50 quality. We ere sole
agents for the Youman Hats, the
finest in America.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
THE CENTURY MAGAZINE
In 1894.

Il In 1894.
ats place at the head of all popular periodicals
published in the English language is no longer DIS
puted anywhere."-Albany Argus
The greatest of all the Magazines. 1000 pages of
the best Literature. 1000 Illustrations by
the Greatest Artists of the World.
The program of the new volume of the Century
Magazine, beginning with the November, number
The chief serial feature is
A NEW NOVEL BY MARK TWAIN.
The most dramatic story ever written by Americas
greatest humorist. Like several of Mark Twain's
Stories it has for its scene steamboat town on the
Mississippi River forty years ago. "Pudd nhead
Wilson, hard headed country lawyer, the hero OF
the story furnishes much of the fun that one nalur
ally expects to find in work by the author OF ihe
Innocents Abroad" but he appears in quite another
light in the murder trial which forms the thrilling
climax of the story. The plot introduces novel
and ingenious employment of science in the deIee-
ton of crime, and the characters are wei drawn
and their every action is interesting The century
will contain
A SERIES OF SUPERB ENGRAVINGS OF THE
OLD DUTCH MASTERS;
Articles on
HUNTING OF FIERCE GAME;
Articles describing
ARTISTS ADVENTURES,
by leading American artists with their illus
trations; Articles descriptive OF
IMPORTANT EXPEDITIONS
in all the great continents including the adventures
of two young Americans who trayersed ASA on
bicycles. a novel series on
TRAPPING WITH TRAMPS;
How young man, disguised tramp. Travelled
over America and learned all the
secrets of the profession;
IMPORTANT PAPERS ON MUSIC
by the greatest living composers and musicians;
Unpublished essays by
JAMES RUSSELL LOWELL;
Short stories and novelties by all the leading story
writer's essays on timely subjects, humor
and fun in the Lighter Vein." de-
partment etc. etc. The
GREAT CHRISTMAS NUMBER
contains a sermon by Phillips Brooks, seven com
plete Stories magnificent array OF full page engra
wings new picture of General Grant, letters from
Edwin Booth, etc.
SUBSCRIBE NOW.
Price 81 90 year. Dealers receive subscriptions,
or remittance may be made to the publishers by
check draft money order. or by cash in registered
letter. Address
THE CENTURY CO.,
IS East 18th Street. New York.
nolS Write for Miniature Century" free.
WE GREET YOU
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
OEHM'S ACME HALL.
OEHM'S ACME HALL.
Lost Opportunities

are the cause of more sorrow than
any one thing in the world. Don't
lose the opportunity now offered to
you to purchase your Fall Clothing,
Hats and Furnishings while the as
sortment is complete.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25

S@--@AN+---'
WHITE MARBLE WAREHOUSE,
Baltimore, Md.
They are large Importers, Jobbers and Re-
tailers, dealing only in goods that they believe
will give satisfaction to the purchaser-no
trash articles, that would be dear at any price
no humbug advertisements of great reduc-
ton in price. The price, in plain figures,
marked on every article. Therefore, the
most inexperienced buyer can purchase from
them with confidence.
Their stock includes Dress Goods, Silks
and Trimmings, Mourning Goods, Ladies'
and Misses Wraps. Housekeeping Linen
Goods, Blankets, Comforts, Quilts. Art
Squares, Shawls, Flannels, Domestic Goods,
Hosiery and Underwear in all Sizes, for La
dies. Gents, Misses and Boys. Gloves, No,
tons, Corsets. Goods for Mems and Boys
Suits and Ladies' Wraps. Galicoes, Cling
hams, Gents Furnishings, Lace Curtains
Table and Piano Covers, &c.
B1Will send Samples when we receive
plain instructions of what is wanted, Colors
preferred and about the Price. sep2S lSt
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
Mems Suits and
Overcoats.

Nothing like them ever known.
Our prices our goods our specials
Superb Suits and Overcoats at 80,
Sl2, $l5, up to the finest made at $25.
An interesting line at $l5, well
worth 800.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
MUTUAL
Fire Insurance Company
OF CARROLL COUNTY.
OFFICE, WESTMINSTER, MD.

OFFICERS OF THE COMPANY:
j. w. Herring, President, Westminster, Car
roll county.
Richard Manning, Secretary and Treasurer,
Westminster, Carroll county.
DIRECTORS.
j. W. Herring, Westminster, Carroll county.
Granville S. Haines, Union Bridge, Carroll
county.
David Prugh, Freedom, Carroll county.
Granville T. Herring, Sandyville, Carroll
county.
Charles B. Roberts, Westminster, Carroll
Edwd. Lynch, Westminster, Carroll county.
David Fowble, Westminster, Carroll county.
R. Manning, Westminster, Carroll county.
DIR. ]. J. Weaver, Jr., Uniontown, Carroll co.
E. E. Reindollar, Taneytown, Carroll county.
AGENTS.
John T. DiHenbaugh, Westminster, Carroll
county.
J. Oliver Wadlow, Freedom, Carroll county.
Z. NJ. Anderson, Mt. Airy, Carroll county.
Louis Dielman, New Windsor, Carroll co.
John S. Repp, Union Bridge, Carroll county.
Alfred Zollickoffer, Uniontowp, Carroll co.
2. Z. Reindollar, faneytown, Carroll county;
J. W, Weant, Double Pipe Creek, Carroll
county.
William H. Shower. Manchester, Carroll
Granville T. Herring, saudyville, Carroll
county.
W. U. Marker, Tyrone, Carroll county.
William A. Abbott, Hampstead, Carroll
county.
John Jones, Mechanicstown, Frederick Co.
o. A. Horner. diminishing, Frederick
county. jams
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
IMPORTANT
To Buyers of Dry Goods.

When you want to purchase Dry Goods OF
any description, it is very important that you
deal with concern of well established repu,
tation, where no advantage will be taken of
parties not fully acquainted with the value OF
what they want to purchase. Such Bust
ness House is
HAMILTON EASTER & SONS,
%, rs and 81 Baltimore Street,
BETWEEN CHARLES AND LIGHT STREETS,
WuITE MARBLE REHOISE
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
CHOICE GRocERIEs

as can be found in our city.
CHOICE TEAS, CoFFEEs, sYRUPs,
NEW ORLEANS MoLAssEs, CANNED
GOODS OF ALL KINDS, CIGARS, TO-
BACCos. &C.
The best grades of Pat. Process and Family
Flour constantly on hand at bottom figures.
win pay the highes: prices for Wheat,
Corn, Rye, Oats, and all kinds OF Country
Produce.
Agent for Latin & 'Rands Blasting Pow
der, and Judson's Dynamite for stump blast
ing, &c.
Can be supplied with the best quality of Cot
ton and Flaxseed Meal, Heavy Middlings,
Bran, &c, at lowest prices
mar28 e. o. GRIMES
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25
FURNITURE! FURNITUREI
RAND DISPLAY
FALL and WINTER GOODS

FALL and WINTER GOODS
Now Exhibited at the large Emporium of
THEO. DERR & SON,
Should be examined by all buyers before
purchasing elsewhere.
Newest Styles,
Best Qualities,
Is our motto.
DRESS GOODS, SILKS, yELVETS,
LADIES' AND CHILDREN'S COATS,
UNDERwARE, HOSIERY. GLOVES,
SHOES, LACE CURTAINS, P0RTIERs,
BLANKETS, COMFORTS,
CARPETS AND RUGS.
FULL AND COMPLETE ASSORTMENT
IN ALL DEPARTMENTS.
THEo. DERR & son,
oct % Westminster, Md.
TO THE PUBLIC
II you want
Elr0 1ASuI duCO,
Life Insurance,
Accident Insurance,
Windstorm Insurance,
Steam Boiler Insurance,
Give me call,
Lowest Rates. Best Stock Compa-
MES. No Assessments. No
Premium Notes. Quick
Cash Settlements.
JAMES E. SMITH,
General Insurance Agent,
No. [ Court Street,
anil If Westminster, Nd.
CURVEYoR, CoNVEYANCER
ID AND SCRIVENER.
Having had many years experience IN the
business, and having purchased all the Field
Books. Papers, &C., that belonged to the late
Surveyor, James Kelly, | take pleasure in
informing the public that | am prepared to
ID such work with promptness and upon rea-
sonable terms, and respectfully solicit share
of the patronage. Office near Patapspo, w.
NJ. R. r. ,,.u
oct l2.tf dAbEA A. bush
~ nv. c1ABAuGH. JOHN NJ. ROBERTS.
ICLABAUGH 8 ROBERTS,
Attorneys-at-Law,
ALBAUGH BUILDING,
COURT STREET, WESTMINSTER,
iano 1872 MARYLAND.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25

tSHARRER Bros
Clothiers & Merchant Tailors.
Wantz Building,
Main Street, Near Depot,
WESTMINSTER, MD.
W. ha,o nsu.,
| A FULL LINE OF GOODS FOR
SEASoNABLE CLOTHING.
uANnKpRcHrEFs. COLLARS. CUFFS,
|
COME AND hAA"iNA W"
49, We show Larger and more
/ Varied stock OF Cloths, Casslmeres'
/ Clothing and Gents Furnishing
Goods than any other house in the
cnvTrc AMI pprcES
ho
win Astonisb Won
,r.1111 mos a,
api'"
To SAVE MONEY
cEcTTpr pESn RARGATNS
-
Y EdotlSo L IKE oeeo'
Fine or Cheap, Just call at
oa 74 mo s+uoo+
WHARF ron will find the LARGEST and most
""e'' ''A select line Of
o,.
pl,;, ond Daoorote5
- o.,,.
" ~
Mnc
LAM ES--LAmfO LAnI .,
II, nh piano Rononet P;ttsbnre.
Library iian, iano, "a I Paanar 81
hoches'er a"u D"""'''
"00P PRzsC %It FfArr A MIRRORS a5ss A"N'
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25

WRITE FOR SAMPLES AND PRICE
LIST.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25

The Schedule taxing eject October l. 1898.
fDaily. SDaily, ex. Sunday. fDaily, ex. Saturday
Trains leave Calvert Station, Baltimore, as follows
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25

POSTER PRINTING specially at
4 the ADVOCATE Office.
The Democratic advocate. [volume] (Westminster, Md.) 1865-1972, 1893-11-25

We invite you to give us call and examine
our Stock. We guarantee our prices as low as
the lowest. Very respectfully,
G. W. MORNINGSTAR,
No. SO W. Main Street,
decS1 Westminster, Md.
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1893-03-01

story at Il literary club: During tho
Charleston earthquake an old negro
rushed out upon the public square, cx-
hibitirg every sign of marked fear and
disquietude. Those who were near
enough heard this petition offered ND
at the throne of grace: oh! Lord,
desc am dc times oh terror. De ycarth
am Il qualin' an dc fires oh hell is
aburnin' TO de onrightus Oh. Lord,
sabc us. Come right down to us. If
yo' cayn't como yo'se'f, sen down dc
I-awd Jesus, but if yo' can come yo'sc'f,
yo'd bettah do it, llasc dis yer's mighty
scr'us mattah, an 'taint no time TO- to
SEN chillun'"
When Ben Butler was in college he
became tired Of hash Mt his boarding
house and put up a job" on the land
lady. Next time the dish appeared all
the young men groaned in concert:
"Oh. hash for breakfast! Hebrews.
xiii, s."
You don't remember that verse? Here
1T is: "Jcsus Christ the same yesterday,
and to-day, and forever" But Bold Ben
didn't mean it to be punctuated that
way.
And it was another Massachusetts
man who was asked by friend what
he was thinking of rs he linclt at the
altar 70 be married. Il was thinking
how confoundcdly funny the soles of
my feet must look from behind" was
the instant and unstudicd response
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1893-03-01

across the Potomac. But you must re-
member, he is represented as saying,
while secretary of state, to dis
tinguished foreign diplomat, to whom
he made the statement, that a dollar
went farthc! then than it does now"
That's old, but here is one about Mr.
Evarts which has never been in print.
lie was invited at one time to 4 dinner
at the house Of n rich manufacturer in
Boston, who proved at dinner to be n
pompous old bore Whenever any of
the distinguished gentry vcnturcd a re-
mark, this man would break in will,
his cxasperating drawl: 'As l once said
to Daniel Webster" or when was
with Charles Sumner at
Evarts stood it rs long rs he could.
After dinner i'll the smoLing-room. he
turned upon his tormentor with the re-
mark: You do yourself Il great in
justice, sir"
How sou demanded the man, taken
aback.
why" said Mr.. Evarts, delibcra tcly,
twiddling his cycglass, as was his Gus
tom, you have been modcs.ly relating
to us these interesting "reminiscences OF
our great departed when everyone
knows that there have been in Your OK
Pcricncc events of far more historical
weight-as that, for instance, when
Columbus ncarcd our coast it was the
voice Of Mr.. - that guided him on his
course with these immortal words:
'Ncau, Mr.. Columbus (imitating the
old mans drawD, if you'll on'y pint
her head right over that way, you'll
make land all right"
This was not humor 1t was wit
the caustic kind that stings. Probably
there was provocatiOn. 1t was this
same Boston merchant whose peculiar
tiles were the butt of many Il merry
tale. boy was seen crying Oh Wash
ington street one day.
What's the mattcr?" said n Good
natured man.
My cents fallen down there" said
the snivcling boy, pointing through 4
grating.
"Oh, that's nothing. Just run in and
tell Mr.. -. He'll climb down and ret
it."
eyes, he will" sobbcd the boy. with
fresh outburst of grief. ''i;-b-but
he'd keep it for himself"
Gen. Grant was not usually credited
with quiclincss Of rcpartcc. but when 4
man said to him one day: Charles Sum
ncr doesn't believe in the Bible"
Grants quiet rcjoindcr was: "Of course
not; he didn't write it,"
And once in camp, when .frcsh''
officer started in to tell Il doubtful story
with the prefix: CAS- there arc no ladies
The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1893-03-01

abyss. Gentleman said he, us he stood
t!:ere in his mud-plastered raiment, Il
thank you all for your kind assistance,
but for which l must inevitably have
lost my life. Now if you will add to
your good labors by assisting me to re-
cover my horse, l will"
Hold on" snid Louisiana man
(this was in congressional cloak
room), your story is all right, King,
only it happened in my own love,
Louisiana"
''Pshaw!' said Virginian. ut wns
right out here on the Richmond road
not dozen miles from Washington"
AS Il matter of fact, the story is sew
cral thousand years old and still in COM
parativcly good health.
There is Chicago story which is told
about Eugene Field, Philip d. Armour,
DIR. Gunsaulus and half n dozen other
victims. The hero couldn't have been
Field. for he is an accomplished linguist.
The tale runs that Chicago man Wis.
iting Paris sat down one day in n res.
taurant Utterly ignorant of the Ian.
guagc, he ran his thumb down the bill
of fare Il little way and said: Here!
Bring nc Some % that" The waiter COM
piled. Struggling his shoulders as ono
who disclaims responsibility and pres
entity returned with dish of picked
pigs feet.
''Il-l"' remarked the pork packer,
surveying The array. chow did he know
WAS from Chicago?"
Chaunccy NJ. Dcpcw, robert G.. Inrcr-
soil and Senator Wolcott, of Colorado.
are called three of the witticst speakers
IL America. One Of Dcpcw's best jokes
fell flat when first uttered and became
famous next day 1t was at the mass
meeting during the Minneapolis con-
vcntion. Dcpcw was holding his audi
cncc i'll great shape when lie compared
somebody or something with "thc in
ebriatcd chamois which, in its Alpine
fastncsS. leaps from jag to Jag" Prob
ably bec;4 Dcpcw's accurate pronun-
citation Of the word "chamois" wasn't
the one taught in the district schools,
there was hardly Il ripple of laughter.
Next day. when folks saw the joke in
type. they roarcd.
Speaker Capron, of Rhode Island, tells
with gustO Il story OF tax collector
who, after an exciting experience out
side, hurst into an Irish woman's cabin
with the remark: "Tll have to tax you
for that goat, Mrs. Mulcahey."
AN why, thin, darlint?"
because the law distinctly says I
must tax all property bounding and
AUDITING on this street, and that goat
has been Astounding and a-butting on
that street for the last half hour"
Either Frank Stockton or julius
Chambcrs-I forget which-told this