The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1893-09-16
MR.. PETER vIvIsEcrED.
A Famous Phrase Maker Uses Verbal
Lancet Upon Elm.

uiolIuS uisucu Dul tic Hi'tSt Coiiioioi'
in the unique collection of philosopher
and law makers who are now discussing
finance. He comes from state tina
! was Graded in internecine blood ant
that has not been ashamed 10 celebrate
its maturity with blatherskites. Every.
thing that is radical goes in Kansas. L
is the great experimental tract of every
I'm that will not take root in less fertile
bat better cultivated soils. Senator
PETER reminds you of the western bel
of that state, where there are still or al
wastes of calm. immutaoe alkali, fires
coed with tangle-grass, and nature as
Sumes an air of dry, imperturbs bic and
everlasting WEAKNESS at her own work.
At first sight of him, you think OF
Ahasuerus and wonder if he wasn't read.
ing the musty palimpsesis to the san
hedrim in awful continuity before OBJ
scene and interesting history began.
He is as Unconditional as a Babvlonian
brick. His humor is as arid as last years
water course in his own state, He has
the same mobility of temperament that
have noticed in a stone quarry. doubt
if blood would come into his face if one
of the metapherical SLABS that he re-
ceives should turn out TO be physical.
His circulating system is incapable of
distiling anything but argument. His
venous and arterial apparatus carry
words. He is stuffed full Of newspaper
clippings-old, dead, rustlng scraps.
The moment he begins to talk you hear
the sound of turning musty and forgot
ten files and smell the sceplic aroma OF
old leaders and grizzly interviews and
cadaverous reports-God rest their souls.
When he has a set speech to make he
begins o get in his chestnuts the day be-
fore. They are piled up on his desk;
official tones, scrap books of all sizes
and shapes; newspapers, reports,
novels, travels, Benton's Thirty
Years. and Barnum's autobiography.
He always has plenty of empty desks
about him, and TO see him wander from
one &c the other in search of citation or
a few chapters, leaving gap Of silence
while he leisurely hunts for the particu-
| lar book in one of those calming expert
ences that make you think that you are
in the English court of chancery. When
he begins to speak it is in tones that re-
mind you of Coleridge's river, Give
miles meandering with a may motion, "
with no other purpose than to reach
"ihe caverns measureless to man."
| Something forebodingly and inviucibly
| intermnabie there is in his mere aspect;
a juiceless, inhuman prospective of
PETER, the purpose of whom bears the
same. relation to the method as the
nucleus of comet bears to the tail. He
squeezes out his WHISPERS with pitiless
deliberation, takes drink of water from
fl,r /. -~l
places it perilously On the edge of the
desk, d, if to show that it Is the acme of
oratory not to knock it off.
The ability, however. to stretch one
idea over the ages; to find all history
and literature and legislation focusing
themselves upon ii; to be willing to sac
ritice the race for that idea and to glory
in being a continental bore for its sake,
was reserved for PETER. If ever the un-
written instinct of the senate is appre-
hended it will be found to be that PETER
is fathOmless bore. That is no doubt
compatible in the alkali s.nso with be-
ing great and good man. Goodness is
very often only another name for den
sity. PETER is honest but superhuous,
and mistaken honesty has caused more
ennu and suicide than violent mendaci-
ty. l think myself that John Calvin.
who was a great man, caused more
misery than Captain Kydd, who wasn't.
Nothing is SO uneventtul and prosaic to
the Kansas mind as log floating with
the stream. But let it once get one end
stuck in the mud and the other end bob
bing. All, then reSis ance becomes
picturesque and things are liable TO
happen.
Mr.. PETER conscentionsly believes
that il is heroic to make Kansas block
the will of the republic. Mr. PETER
does not in his soul believe that the gov
eminent can fix the intrinsic values of
metal, but he always talks as if he did
He knows perfectly we'll that at this
moment there is general consensus of
opinion among the American people that
congress has one specific duty; that all
duties are secondary, however urgent.
But to acquieSce in this demand would
detract from the conspicuousness Of
PETER.
SO long as he is an obstructionist Kan
sas has show, and he can keep On max
ing scrap books. In some way it is The
duty of the Republic to protect Mr..
PETERS private industry. In so large
family there is always some radical
small boy who, if he cannot help on the
car OF progress, can at least throw stones
at the train.
What struck me with particular force
was the magnificent and reticent mag
nanimity that puts up with PETER. 1t
not only tolerate5 him; it presents his
consuming NAV with hours for the
degluttion of his own Authorizations.
Il isn't necessary for any body but the
presiding officer and the clerks to be
present when he uncoils himself and
swallows his blanket, but he is allo wed
TO perform the ceremony TO the desks.
In these speeches there is u trace of
luminosity; it is not an emotion, it is
an integral notion. 1t is like the ar
senic in a stuffed owl. Put concretely,
it is the ineradicable belief that sin
entered into the world Ivy the way of
Wall street: that Satan is banker; that
finance is the Mephisto of our country.
and Kansas is the bleeding Marguerite;
that panics are manufactured to order,
and that the president of the United
States is a co-conspirator with he
money magnates OF the east to degra e
silver and oppess the people. All Mr..
PETERS oratorical roads lead to this
iNpiAiC. A1i' pio w
are doctrinaire and pragmasic; his ar
raj 5nment of Wall strert has the earn
estness of "A sermon. He would plough
and sow Broad street with salt and
plant corn IN the Stock exchange on high
moral grounds. Honesty Is question
CT longitude.
Being tedious, superfiuous and false,
We might yet put up with all this if it
were not also unbearably provincial
The town pump sticks out of it. The
intE,.tiuabie structure of il reminds Won