The western sentinel. [volume] (Winston-Salem, N.C.) 1887-1926, 1893-04-20
SMILES OF THE SUNNY SOUTH
Jordan-Marriage is no lottery.

HeNlett-N by not!
Jordan-ln a lottery one gets
either something good og-nothing-
never anything bad.
> Mrs Matchem-Why didn't you
marry her? She is such ID sensible
girl.
Newman that's just the
trouble.
An exchange says that money is
scarce aud meat is high" but adds
most cheerfully: "Thank the Lord,
salvation's free!'
Watts-I don't believe that polite
ness always pays.
Potts-Whether it pays or not, it
is a great help toward getting credit.
L think the Pilgrim mothers had
harder time than the Pilgrim
fathers" said Hicks.
"Why?" queried Dickson.
"Why, they not only had to endure
the same privations as the Pilgrim
fathers, but they had to get along
with the Pilgrim fathers as WE'LL
'The major didn't get the post
Officer"
"No but he's takin' hisspite out on
the government.
"How?"
entails all his letters on the train"
"How did you get your face all
scratched up? Been shaving your
self?
mo, l was one of the judges in
prize baby show"
The scriptures have it: "Many are
called, but few chosen" But in this
day of the office seeker it is: MANY
are chosen, but few called"
Editor Morc1ck, of the Elberton
Star, bagged silver dollar recently,
and the following is the result:
"Almighty dollar, thy shining face
Bespeaks thy wondrous power;
In my pocket make thy resting place,
l need the every hour
Suffering Customer-Have you
anything that will cure neuralgia?
Druggist-No, sir.
Customer with fervor)-Give me
your hand It's some composition
for seventeen years of misery that
I've found one honest man at lastl
The editors may joke as they pleas
about the crinoline, but they cannot
deny that it ''covers the ground
The Brunswick Times says that
every newspaper office has an open
ing for spring poets-in fact two
openings-the door or the window,
as preferred.
"Well," said the editor to the dying
delinquent, chow do you feel about
the future?"
cts bright-all bightP' gasped
the delinquent.
81 thought So" said the editor,
SIN about fifteen minutes you'll see
it blazeP'
"What is the greatest accomplish
ment you know OFF, said the talka-
tive young man.
ITO say nothing silently" replied
the peppery young woman.
The man who sat out on the wood.
pile and told funny stories, expect
ing the wood would be split, evident
ly did not strike a responsive
chord"
1t was the first time Johnny had
ever heard a guinea hen. 80, ma u
he shouted. ''come and hear this
chicken windin' itself upP'
Applicant you recognize
me, Mr. President?
Cleveland-Yes, / recognized you,
but can't place you.
'sThat air is very familiar" said
the musician as gust of wind took
his hat away.
Uncle Bluegrass Will them colors
run?
Clerk-Yes, but 1 can give you
something else.
Uncle Bluegrass-No; Mandy said
be sure and git fast colors.
Bishop Gullem-Yes, it is a good
work, and l trust you believe in
maintaining foreign missions.
Parishioner-Indeed, / do. Why,
papa sees Mr.. Cleveland every day
about one.
ssThere's the devil to payin town, !"
said the subscriber, rushing in.
81 know it, sighed the editor,
"And I owe him six months sal
airy p'-Atlanta Constitution.
GAS we announced in our saluta-
|, tory, we are here to stay" writes a
Georgia editor. "Weshav been here
ten years, and it costs $6 to move. !"
Dead men tell no tales, but the
ones who write their obituaries often
do.-Texas Siftings.
A famous dressmaker has designed
coming out gown. 1t looks it, ac-
cordiag to the pictures--New Or
leans Picayune.