The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1893-07-03
MISSISSIPPI MEN.
An lmprsm pin speaker Tnvns the Tables
ON 1 uivAl Orator.

- EEGf
An Imprsn pin speaker Tnvns the Tables
on = Rival Orator.
No school s~smmsncsmsnt n Mississippi
ID oomplsts withoutths pressncs Of ons %
mora rspfea sntativss Of the stats govern
ment. and tho commencement Of : certain
celebrated college In Jackson the other day
was no exception to the general rule gov
sining such Affairs. II % happsnsd that on
this suspicious occasion Uncls Joe Evans.
the great. whols-soulsd keeper Of the states
after shs accounts. wsrs detailsd 10 DO duty
a. ~exponsnts Of Official sentiment on behalf
81 ths stats government. These Rentlsmsn
always vic with one another TO So who can
render TO his friend the greatsst honor. =
d.ssrmins Who should 1rss address the
young ideas who we're about TO 20
ouS Into ths world and shoot. At
last, after much debate and Z grand
exhibition Of unselish Difference. each TO
the Other, II vat finally decided that Capt.
Stone should go into the fray II the van:
captain Owed into his subject and tossed
his %sloquence in large chunks and email
shunks broadcast over the psrspirinR A.
ssnbly. He Rloried in tho. grandeur OF
Mississippi and her magnidcent tnssitu.
tious. he told In classic terms the deeds q
nelds and on the musings. How they had
risen supreme from she deptha 81 Iuin
which had been wrought b.. those IN once
before the people rosa up ~ THOR m'an
and elected such men ~ his honorsd ron
frsrs 70 ONCE. And this reminded him that
II there was one thing on earth hat NJ DID
dearly love 10 do II Was to make q 1peeeh 81
3 school commencement. but - sne pre-.
oramms was long and the weather was hot.
no thought he detected 9 look Of vsarlnsas
-. A.. rrnx~1auCa NJ aoVna NJ hin has fAFn.
and he knew, Furthermore, that his good
friend, Joe Evans. had entered those
classic halls loaded with classic lore.
which no would deliver with rare forensic
oloquencs IL the opportunity was allowed
him. ut II not for me-" continued the
states auditor, ITO intrude my feeble Of
fort OF mine between Joe Evans and bis
opportunity. II IL NOT for auch ~ l the
applause OF listening aenates to command
whom Joe Evans IL bending meath the
weight Of mighty truths and eloqusnce d.
vine. Joe Evans came here to talk TO you
and now his opportunity has come"
II there was ono thing on earth Jos Evans
was not prepared to do and did not want to
do, it vas to make . speech On this same
occasion, but the fatss aeemsd against AIM,
and the casual observer detected IN the
twinkle OF Wat Stones eye much that say
orsd OF victory a. he proudly descended the
rostrum. But those rsople did not know
the state treasurer. They did nos fathom
tho deep design that underlaid the placid
smile that Ilayed about his frank and open
sountsnAnce a. he rose to reply.
Ladies' and gentlemen" no began. al
orators usuRlly do. do not become
alarmed. There 10 no one who appreciated
more sensibly than I do the great compli-
ment implied by my good friend, Capt
stone. But my great love for you and my
ardent desire to have the noble programme
you havs prepared for the entertxinmsnt Of
your guests carried to a successful conclu-
sion, impsls me to decline to talk to you to.
day. Ny reason for this 10 that ! observed
that whom Capt. Stone took the rostrum al
least one-third Of the audience fed prsoipi-
lately in dismay from the hall, n If suol
q fate has been his / surely would deprive
yen OF q mother third, which You can readily
sec would break the quorum and deprive ii
Of the pleasure to be derived from the Of
forts OF those who are yet to speak," ane
with that he smiled a villainous smile o.
the auditor, whose smile in return was not
too full of the regulation mirth which uBu-
ally goes along with commencement cxer
clses.
Capt. Stone tells this story a littlo differ
entity. inasmuch as be declares that the
audience listened with much respectful
attention to him until he mentioned DOT
Evans name, n II Wal then that tn
stampede commenced that threatened ts
depopulate the hall. But be this as It may
the story ia out, and there IN a coolnes
blowing down the hallway between tn
auditors and the traasurer's offices. -Nev
Orleans Picayune.