Clinch Valley news. [volume] (Jeffersonville, Va.) 18??-2019, 1893-04-21
PITH AND POINT.

PITH AND POINT.
A love knot-No.
a dog show-Teeth.
Stone blind-A cats eye.-Puck.
Open to conviction-Penitent
Every man is hero to his Imagination,
Life.
a question of identity-"What's your
aame2"
A cash balance-The scales of justice.
Puck.
"That is another story" as the builder
said when ordered to run the walls up
higher Press.
Truth may be stranger than fiction,
but in literature it hasn't as high mar.
ket value.-Boston Courier.
When man unexpectedly stops into
fortune he can not be upbralded for
having put his foot in it.-Puck.
Pin not your faith to any man
Who feels no throb Of Joy,
When to the circus he's a chance
People finally get onto the man who
is always volunteering to oblige his
friends, but who never does it.-Atchi-
son Globe.
You may freeze, you may bust the gas
meter if you will, but at the end of the
month just the same, there's the bill
Williamsport Republican.
"What is pillage, papa9" at ia
charging dollar for eight cents worth
of pills, my son. 1t is very lucrative
business. "-Harper's Bazaar.
Representation steals our time,
The sages gravely say.
1t is injustice; he but takes
The time we throw away
Washing ton Star.
"Death loves shining mark" said
the man who was engaged in selling
mythical fortunes in ore, "bat luckily
it's different with mining shark. -
Washington Star.
Edison is quoted as declaring that the
man of the future will be able to do.
without sleep altogether. This i'm
plies the extinction of the policemen. =
Washington Star.
Solitude builds up the strength; so.
ciety pulls it down. 1t is the necessity
of having to meet so many people that
turns the able bodied lemon to circus
lemonade.-Puck.
MagIstrate-"Your hand was found
in the prosecutors pocket. Have you;
anything to say2" Prisoner-'Only that
I used TO be lawyer, your worship, and
habit is strong. Pick Me Up.
Gilgal-"If you want anything we'll
done, do it yourself, is good rule"
Mullins-"I know better one. If you
want anything we'll done, tell the waiter
to bring it rare. "-Elmira Gazette.
Let derk-frowning plunkity rub-a-dub- dub
And the snickersnee pizZie- tel bun;
Wen guzze the muzzle OF burberry blub
To the soft-wailing rum-a-tum-tun.
Harold Payne. in Truth.
Primus-"Why does Boswell weai
that monoce2" Secondus-"Oh, there's
an English girl uptown who is the apple
of his eye, and he's trying to cultivate
her under glass. "-Kate Fields Wash
ington.
Visitor-''Are you going to be a shoe
merCnanC, ike your laCnerf Johnny
"Naw. I'm going into some business
where I can afford to give my little boy
a dime whenever he wants iG."-Indian-
apolis Journal.
"Johnny, you have left the doc,
open, and are letting the cold air into
the house." al can't help it, ma. Pm
playing this rooms street car and I'm
the conductor. It would not seem real
if the door was not left open. Buffalo
Express.
''Who is that mau with the loud voice
and the loud clothes and the loud man
ners2" said the commercial tourist whose
efforts to sell goods had been ruthlessly
interrupted. "That," was the reply,
sis the firms silent partner. Washing
ton Star.
Alfred (rapturously )-"Now, darling,
please name the happy Minnie
(blushingly)-"Thrce weeks from next
Thursday, Alfred" Norah (through the
keyhole)-''If you please, miss, that's
my day out. You'll have to git married
in the early part of the week. Tit Bits.