The Madison daily leader. [volume] (Madison, S.D.) 1890-current, 1893-08-09

w O6 - DNN $500 NNN
been carefully washed. and his hair well
combed and brushed. | washed my face
and brushed my hair, anu thought that
to wear TN unventilated hat even three
hours couldn't he SO very dreadful a
puaisA@s,L.t -st.y all had reczoned
without my host,
THIS way, go.tleInen, II sou please"
said the hattor's assistant as he mo-
toned us to follow him through q door
leading toward the basement.
At tie end Of q passage under thsshop
front WAS d little with n sloping
roof. Side by side were two easy chairs,
beneath each of which was a winch for
raising or lowering tine cllAfr to any re-
quired height. My companion took his
seat at once, He vas evidently used to
the ways Of the place, Then the assist
ant st1apred him in 10y means of two
thick leather bands with massive buc-
kles, one Mt the ueck and the other at the
waist. Then the shopman suddenly
opened a little trapdoor 12 inches square
in the la~, sloping roof of the apart
ment and worked away actively at the
winch. The chair rose. and the head Of
its occupant disappeared through the
little trapdoor to the shoulders. Then
the man turned a large nut which was
affixed to the back of the chair and mo-
toned me to take my seat in the other.
why do You strap us IMP | said to
the man as | took my seat.
You'll know why, governor, by the
time you've earned that half q crown"
he said with a malignant grin. Nov,
look here" he continued, IF you want
to sneeze or cough or anything, get it
done now, and don't you go a-larfing or
larking with the boys at the window. If
you do. it will be deducted for"
Then he began to wind me up, and l
made my first appearance in Mr.. Will
kins' shop front to a round of tumultu-
N applause from a crowd Of idlers in
the street who stared into the shop win
dows, Then somebody carefully fitted
q hat onto my head and gave it know
ing cock. Then the mahogany arrange
ment was drawn up close to my neck.
and there | sat. perfectly comfortable,
staring at the crowd of idlers in the
street. And then a draft of cool air be-
gan to flow through the holes that sur
rounded my neck. Mr.. Wilkins really
took a wonderful amount of trouble to
insure our comfort. 4"
AT first the novelty of my situation en-
tirely occupied my mind. l felt inclined
TO laugh as | thought of myself as a
bodiless head wearing a ventilating hat.
The boys in the street, too, made gri-
macesa ct me. Then | looked at my fellow
victim out of the corner of my eye. He
was evidently already suffering from the
effects of his unventilated hat. His
teeth were tightly set. He looked any
thing but happy. Great drops of per.
spiration already stood upon his brow.
| didn't trouble myself very much about
him.
The time passed pleasantly enough and
I heard the clock of Shoreditch church
at length strike 4. AS it struck ! was
startled to hear the wearer of the un.
ventilated hat give a hollow groan. ]
looked at him ono more out of the
corne of my eye. He had become ghast.
! ly pale. He looked as if he were melting
gradually. In fact, the poor fellow seemed
very i'll indeed. Strange that a badly
ventilated hat should produce such
marked effects. Well. it wasn't my
business.
The clock of Shoreditch church struck
4:30. heard footsteps in the room be.
low. and at the same time ! was de.
prived of my ventilating hat. A brand
new hat was placed upon my head, and
the show cards which stood behind oul
respective heads were exchanged. The
drafts of cool air which came through
the innumerable little holes in the ma
hogany flooring around my neck sudden.
ly ceased. A current Of heated air sup
piled its place. | looked out of the
corner of my eye at the other head
The face wore an ecstatic smile. The
easy chair in which ! was sitting began
to grow warm, and finally became ac-
tually hot-unpleasantly hot.
saw through the whole fendish trick
at one | was to be tortured an hour
and a half for the amusement Of an idle
crowd in order that the public might b
gulled into the purchase of the so callet
ventilating hats of the fend Wilkins.
felt-but | will not dwell on m,
agonies; | will not dilate upon the hor
rible sufferings ] endured. I was bein,
gradually cooked alive, and | felt tina
concentrated boiling gravy was cours
ing through my veins. My feature
were contorted with agony. The GROVE
in the street outside applauded.
! tried to break loose. As I did SO
voice from the room below uttered tn
following dreadful threat, 'It's 100 now
my a and If You move I'll make j
$50" shed tears of rage, indignation
and agony. endured the most dread
full tortures an hour and q half. Whel
left Wilkins establishment with q hal
a crown in my pocket. ! was more dea'
than alive.
1t is the dream of my life that | an
Mr.. Wilkins. the inventor of the vent
lating hat. may meet in some lionel
place. am not a revengeful man, bu
| feel that | owe Wilkins a debt that
should like to pay.-Exchange.