The Jersey City news. (Jersey City [N.J.]) 1889-1906, 1893-11-13
HUMOR OF ELECTION DAY.
A Few Incidents that Took Place
During the Cyclone.

Although Tuesdays fight was serious
enough. yet there a%bouuded plenty of
funny incidents which remind one of
election days in olden times, when
broken heads, whiskey and s%hillelaghs
played An important part. There were
no Shillelaghs used on Tuesday, unless
a. policemau's club can be included in
that class of weapon; aud there were no
broken heads. but there was plenty of
whiskev flying about and as a conse-
quence any amount of victims. Oae OF
these tackled along Magnolia avenue TO
Colonel John j. Toffey's house holding
is his hand an official balloi. SHAY" be
sputtered to the Colonel'5 servant who
answered the vigorous ting at the bell.
"Whash dat mean?" holding at arms
length the ballot. why, that's an
official ballot" replied the servant.
Now. yer can't fool me-hic-Iwaush
vote fur Toffey-hic-and not McLaugh-
lin. Itsh outrage put IS name on my
ballot"
After a deal of persuasion he staggered
off, saying. "Shpose all right; blamed
funny; Denuy's name Oh ballot for
Totfey. Hoorayl Let's have a drink"
STRIKING THE COLONEL.
Another whiskey SCARED. veteran
came to Mr.. Toffey's door and ia ckIed
the Colonel's son. Young man, | have
an immense regard for your father;
am working for him and will
elect II him fnnd out is somew 5empor a a9y
barrassfng my Gould you
oblige me with a losn?" MIR. Totfey. Jr..
left his visitor at the door and went up
to his fathers room and told him The
colonel gave his son a dollar and he in
rs,uru gave it to the seedy gentleman at
the door.
THANKS. Let the Colonel know of my
n.raffty7da - hot i,AHfuiAro rap1IaA nc no
crumpled up the bill in his lett hand and
raised his hat with his right. Half au
hour later when the Colonel was leaving
his home he was accosted by tue same
person iu a high state of intoxicatfon,
who hiccoughed. Come have a drink
my friend Toffsy, devllish good fellow,
just paid an old debt"
A FRIENDLY VOTER.
Mr.. Reuben Simpson relates q funny
story of a drunken mau who cam e TO
vote 10 the celery district. The polling
station was In the rooms of the Mink akwa
Club, and about midday IL solemn look
ing Irishman entered the booth. Hs took
the bundle of official ballots from "a man
at thed door, n very gravsly inspected
them. He went into the private COM
partment aud emerged a second after
with the envelope in his hand. ''Thsre
sor," he said to the CLERK at the ballot
box, ''them's nv men," and SO saying
walked out Three or four hundred
yards away from the booth he halted to
talk to a group of friends working on
the electric railroad track and triumph
antly assured them tnat be had friends
Dimmycratic, Republican, cowld wather
and indipindint, and begorra Dim not
the mar to go back on me frinds."
"How did you vote to please livery
man 7" asked one of the group.
'Oh, now, look at that" he replied.
Sure l voted all the tlckets.n When
the votes were counted, sure enough
there was an envelope with every blessed
one OF the five official ballots III Il.
MoRAL FORCE PRESENT.
A NEWS reporter met a member of one
of the downtown churches. who is famed
ps a hopess. upright, thoroughly uuso-
phistlcated old gentleman. and asked
him What is the Moral Reform League
doing today?"
We'll my young friend" be replied,
I'VE have taken control of this election.
| you know, aud although, personally, we
are not standing around like heelers, yet
| we are there in spirit. Our moral irflu-
| ence IN there"
One of the snrewdest and ablesE of city
| detectives is Michael Egan. who is oc~
casionally located in Greenvlile. Mr..
Egan's clerical collar, sombre clothes
aud general ecclesiastical air causes some
people to mistake him for a priest. AS
he was walking past one of the First dis
trict polling stations an elderly woman
stopped him. Save yer reverence, my
boy is going TO the divil wild this election.
He is full of politics and whiskey. Piaze
| yer revei ence, spake wid him. The
boy was a Swapping fellow over six
feet in height and weighing about two
hundred pounds. and his reverence
didn't think That his interference would
be well received especially as he ap-
| peRred to be fuller with whiskey than
politics.
However. Mr.. ERau made a bluff and
began young man your mother and /
am shocked -' but his reverence
| didn't get any further. "Oh rats, Nike,
| come TO our house and nave a drink for
there Is an elegant luncheon spread there
| aud the boys are getting away with green
| tuftJe.D The mother was so ~astonished
at her son that before she could say any
thing at all ner sou and the .'fAtnern had
vanished.
UNFORTUNATE LIZZIE GANN.
Tiyz;o rann Of Hohakan WAC q rna1tod vacfar.