New-York tribune., 1893-12-29
TIE T1LE or THE DAY.


The Wilson Tariff bill has convinced Colonel
Henry Watterson that he right when he said
that the Democratic party marching through
a slaughter-house to an open grave He says that
what the Ways and Means Committee should have
done was TO kick the crew OF rogues and rascals
out OF the committee room. ito close the windows
and to bar the doors. and make tariff for
only in consonance with the pledges OF the party
and the expectation of the voters. ignoring alike
the claims and pretences of the robber barons and
placing the duties wherever they would yield the
most revenue regardless of protection. Then, with
such a bil-a bill simple child might understand
t. no schedule no cassihcatons. 70 free list. but a
simple Sill embracing items enough 70 Yield the
needful amount 10 be got through the Custom
Houses-as far as possible commodities lot pro-
duced in the United State tea coffee and sugar os
a matter Of course-then. we say, - M' Wi.1on could
have turned to the Democrats Of I'll House nnd
exclaimed: Vote against this bin at your own
peril"
There l suppose my dress Is ruined forcver.~
MARY spilled milk all over the sleeve
as the water dries out you can brush the chalk
right off.-(Chicago Inter Ocean.
Baggs readng Of the conviction OF noted GRIM
naD-EIow true II is that the wicked stand on Slip
perry places,
Jaggs-Yes in this world; but they won't In the
world to come, unless the popular theology Is mis-
taken
\ Different Kind OF Game.-Did you hunt while
you were in the East? , ,
Not much. except with bellows well charged
with Persian powder. (Brooklyn Lie.
The American Cutivator' says that Mrs. Jen-
ME Atchley. OF Beeville Bee County. Texas. is the
most extensive breeder OF queen bees in the world.
She is the mother of eight children, who. with her.
do all the work of her large apiary. She has be-
tween so and 1000 colonies OF bees, devoted ex-
cluslveIy to queen-rearing, and has sold about 300
queens this season. She receives orders from all
parts Of the globe.
Could Afford servants-First Boy-Your mother
shc5 sn5 half SO strict with you as size D''1 - w.
second Boy-Oh. she doesn't have time to bother
about any more Pops had a raise OF saary;
and now mothers got a steady job hunting around
Intelligence ofices.-lStreet & Smiths Good News
Saws nm Episcopal clergyman. MANY bishops OF
our Church are in the habit OF describing them'
selves by Divine permission bishop or their oio-
cese in official documents. \ certain bsnop' WHOSE
name need not be given. not long ago had occasion
to send such a document to n most devout. but not
highly educated. layman. Thereupon II became 'fe
duty of the layman in question 10 draw up ana
sign an official document relating } some Church
business and noticing the phrase referred 10 IN 'ie
bishops paper he thought 1t wast incumbent upon
him also to recognize the divine guidance SO. IN
entire good faith he described himself as 'John
Smith by Divine permission grocer and dealer III
all kinds OF -four and feed The paper never got
into the archives Of the Church. however as ne
was requested to draw up another with the OBJ
jectionable phrase omitted
A Drummer-I.ttle Boy-who was that man
who's been talSin to you so drammer
What sort of drums does he drum on
Far drtns"-(Street smith Good News
The Rev. s. A. Barnett an Anglican clergyman.
who has for many years been doing apostohc work
omong the poor of East London, says that the
Anglican Church does not reach more than per
cent of the dense population in that region. Inc
two reasons for this failure. he declares, are the
wealth OF the Church and its liturgy The COM
mon people," he says. "do not understand how the
Church. with so much money at its command s
so ul-kept and the parson such a persistent beg
gar They Judge the Church they would a de-
partment OF State or their own trade-union. by
its management of its money, and they condemn
f. The suspicion that the parson does not serve
God for naught discounts the attractive power or
many sincere acts" AS to the liturgy, he says:
.'The people are repealed by the form OF service
They are used to direct address; they are not
used 10 being called dearly beloved TO being told
that references are 10 be found in sundry places
or to treated week. for all their lives as
IL their circumstances were unchanged. Ihe
slavery for instance. of the clergyman TO the
words of the prayer-book at moments OF intense
feeling the careful intonatlon by careless boys OF
the statement that they miserable sinners. the
importance set on postures and gestures. all jar
upon reason which has not been enlarged by
history or art"
First Yalesian-Dld you break the news TO poor
Jacks father and mother gently?
Second Yalesian-Yes; sent em two telegrams;
YOU know. First read. Jack killed in game. and
second Princeton wins.'-U.ife.
The Christmas number Of THE School Journaf'
contains sixty -four pages and is handsomely Illus
traed. There are two stories about school life ana
some cuts toy show the picturesque side OF school
DAYS; the children are standing up In the reader
class" Just they did when we were boys. There
are cuts from the new books OF the day and nu-
merous notes Of educational dongs and an abun-
dance o matter showing activity and comprehefi-
sion OF the educational situation by this Journal
Not a Happy Iot-Editor (,Boom City Boomerl
There's another fellow waiting out there with
gun All me. An editors lot Is not a happy one
Iii that man should XIII he would lose nothing.
as there are plenty OF other fools willing TO take
my place here and keep him supplied with the
news OF the day at cents copy.
Friend-You are good shot and can pick him
off with perfect safety right from this window
Edtor-Huh II you running this paper
you'd soon be bankrupt If should kill him Id
V