davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Wadsworth dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1892-1899, 1893-04-19
"Rev." Sam Jones at Kokomo.

The people OF Kokomo are suffering
an eruption Of "Rev." Sam Jones'
mouth just now. Here is an extract
from a sermon" delivered Tuesday
night; "In some places the grand jury
is indicting the card players. Why
don't they do it in Kokomo. Your
ministers would find their congregations
all in jail and would have to go there to
do their preaching. It's come to a pretty
pass when protested Christians are out of
the penitentiary bya scratch. You old flea
bitten blatherskites and hypocrites you.
Too many church deacon have demi-
johns at home. What sort OF animals
are you? Such people will be in hell
before their feet are cold. A mean
church member is the meanest man on
earth. You goddess old hounds, hpyo-
critics and sinners. Every church is
cursed with y gang OF .'old cutters"
contemplate, tlea-bitten old cutters,
who leave one church and are picked up
by another. If your eggs are As rotten
as the town ! don't want to be egged.
You can throw ancient hen fruit at me,
but don't give Inc any Of your spoiled
Kokomo fruit. The devil has finished
his work in kokomo and gone on."-
Review, Greenbcrg. Indiana.
The Wadsworth dispatch. [volume] (Wadsworth, Nev.) 1892-1899, 1893-04-19

Subscribe for the DIsrATcu and get the
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

height. Everything about the house
S perfect in its way. The clap boards
and shingles are all of the right size,
and fit into place exactly. There are
over 5000 shingles on the roof. One
pair Of window blinds contain more
than go tiny Stats, and have brass
hinges and fastenings. The window
panes are of glass, about l4x2s inch
es, and each window has a fly screen
to keep the breeze away from Dandy
when he sleeps in the afternoon.
On the edges Of the roof are little
rain cutters, and there are spouts to
carry of the water. Dandy's master
is thinking Of running small steam
pipe to heat the house when cold
weather comes, and he has started to
put in an electric alarm to call the
pug when he is wanted. Up in the
front of the gable is a round piece of
colored glass, and across the front is
the sign, Dandy Cottage" in ebony
letters inlaid in tulip wood. The
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
Dandy's Comfortable House.


OF course most OF you have seen
dogs that had houses of their own,
warm, comfortable kennels, but it is
not likely that many of you have ever
heard Of a dog with home with
windows and doors, colored glass, and
sign-in fact, complete cottage,
with all modern improvements-for
dogs.
There is such dog, though, and
such house up in Somerville, Mass. ,
and not long ago the Boston Globe
sent an artist up there to get a pict-
ure OF Dandy and his property.
Dandy is fat little pug, years
old, and his master and mistress are
very fond Of him. He has many
other friends, too, among them a car
riage builder, who has of late been
spending his spare time putting
Dandy's house together 1t is per-
feet model OF full-sized dwelling,
and stands between and 4 feet in
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

The problem of manufacturing a
non-corrosive paint for the bottoms
OF steel and iron warships, which has
been vexing the navy officials for
long time, has just been satisfacto.
rily settled. A paint was invented in
Germany, several years ago, which
had the desired properties; but, as
the government requires American
made paint on American warships, it
could not be used Now, however,
the German paint plant has been re-
moved to this country and United
States cruisers will now have non.
corrosive bottoms. The question OF
suitable paint for use in salt water
has troubled all countries, the Japan.
csc alone having had a non-corrosive
article. This is lacquer whose com.
position they keep secret.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
Fine Pigs,

The wife of farmer, having two
marriageable daughters, decided to
give an evening party and invite a
number Of her acquaintance. among
wnom were several eligible young
men.
Her husband. a plain, blunt York.
shlreman, who knew more about
COWS and sheep than of tiquette. was
quently cautioned to be on his best,
behavior while the company were
present. He was taught by his
daughters that il by any means he
ala make remark which might OF.
iend the guests, to Immediately apo-
logic by saying, "Of course, present
company excepted"
Inc night for the party came round.
and all were ready to sit down to the
table, when it was found that the
most himself was absent. However
AFTER an awkward wait of a few min.
utes, the old farmer came quietly in.
to the room.
"Why. father. however is it. Won
are SO very late?" asked the eldest
daughter. 0S'
well. you see, my lass, I've lust
been over to Farmer Giles, looking
at MS pigs, and they are as flne a lit
Ter OF pigs as you ever set ewes on
present company excepted, OF coorse!"
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

FRANK r. STOCKTON, writing in
the Forum Of Mark Twain and his
recent works, says: mark Twain's
most noble characteristic is courage.
Few other men-even il the other
men could think of such things
would dare to say the things that
Mark Twain says. To describe the
travels Of a man on a glacier, with
particular reference to the fact that
being pressed for time he rode upon
the middle OF the glacier, which
moves faster than the edges, is one
OF the bravest things in literaturc.
1t required courage to write She,
but She could not possibly exist and
glaciers do move. Mark Twain is a
high jumper, but he always jumps
from the solid rock OF fact and is
not afraid OF breaking his neck by
falling back upon it,"
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
Brave Hannah smell.

There have been many women war
riors in the world, but it must be ad-
mitted that there have been very few
whose deeds were such as to claim the
admiration of the country for any
great length Of time. In the annals
of woman's warfare there are gener-
ally stories of Over-Zealousness, lead
ing to fanaticism and subsequent
punishment and disgrace. Seldom,
indeed, has woman warrior been
gratefully recognized by the govern
ment of her country. Within the
memory Of our grandparents there
lived in England woman named
Hannah Smell, who, when but girl,
took the strange resolution OF enlist
ing as a soldier. She served as ma
rine on one Of the vessels of a fleet
bound for the West Indies, and
showed so much courage that she was
repeatedly promoted. Her sex was
unknown, and therefore it could
never be claimed that Hannah SHELLS
success was due to Partially or favor
itism. Once, when dangerously
wounded, she extracted the ball her
self, fearing that she might be dis
covered and discharged. After long
service she returned to her native
home at Worcester, England, where
her adventures soon became spread
abroad. The government, on inves-
cation OF her really great career,
granted her pension Of EGO. She
died full of years and laden with hon.
ors in an inn near Wapping.-Phila.
delphia Inquirer.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

THE Boston Globe wakes eloquent
,ly indignant over the discrimination
shown against young women in En-
glish colleges, and refers with con-
siderable heat to the fact that ten
young women have passed the exam
,ination for the mathematical tripos
at Cambridge, but cannot be given
a degree. Can it be possible that
Harvard has taken down the bars be-
tween the sexes and admitted women
to the university on terms of equality
with men? Or is the Globe still liy-
ing in a glass house?
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

Ing missionary work, which II general
ly adopted would very soon tell in our
exports OF corn and corn-meal. 1t is
that the millions OF adopted citizens
in the United States, when writing
their friends in the old world, men,
tion the excellence and cheapness of
corn as human food. They would
confer benefit on the land Of their
birth and the land Of their adoption.
We have exactly the food that tie
poor Of Europe need, IL they only
knew its value; and it is only by
persistent and varied effort that their
prejudices can be overcome for their
own good and ours.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

A RETURN made by British Gov.
eminent agent shows some peculiar
things regarding the prices of bread
and flour at different points on the
Continent of Europe. For instance,
-four retailed at cents a pound at
Budapest and cents a pound at
Paris, Frankfort and Florence. At
Lille, flour Was AZ cents a pound. and
white household bread 81 cents a
pound: at Berlin these figures were
exactly reversed. OF course, quality
has much to do with price; but it is
remarkable how the price of bread
varies with different cities. In some
English cities it is almost given
away; and in some American cities it
brings two or three times the price
that it does in England.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

A DISPATCH from Kokomo, Ind,
recently reported the death OF Juan
Burger, the l3-year-old son Of a citi-
zen of that place, from the direct
effects Of cigarette smoking. In his
room were found 9ss empty cigarette
boxes he was saving ur to send to the
manufacturers for prize. He had
come within twelve of the prize when
inevitable death stepped in and
claimed the victim-of narcotic poi
soning-and yet, with these fatal re.
suits constantly reported. there are
thousands OF parents who are so I'M
wise as to offer no objection or to
make no effort to prevent their chill
dren from continuing habit which,
II it does not soon kill them, dwarfs
and wrecks them for life! And in the
face OF this cigarette numbering there
are manufacturers sordid and wreck
less enough to offer premium for the
murder Of children. 1t is a pity no
law can be found which will stop the
evil. tits even more pity that there
is not some law which will visit the
severest penalties upon those who
tempt children into this pernicious
habit by the offering of prizes.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

The city Of Asuncion in Paraguay
Is described by correspondent as one
of picturesque charm and full OF rel
les Of magniflcence. It is lighted by
electricity, and with its one-story
houses, painted white, pink, green
or lavender, with floors of Paraguayan
marble in colors, presents half ORR
entail and half medieval appearance.
The location in the harbor with
wooded hills in the background is one
of picturesque charm.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

JOHN CUDAHy, the great packer,
many times millionaire as was COM
monty reported, played the role OF
"plunger, and plunged into financial
ruin. For many years he had been a
remarkably successful man. BY close
attention to great and profitable
business and by shrewd buying and
selling and handling OF pork prod
ucts, he had accumulated vast fort
une. He might have retired at any
time and been as happy as vast
wealth can make any man for the
rest of his life, enjoying the best that
money can afford, and doing good all
around him. His income was so vast
that it would have been a serious
effort to spend the tenth OF it. He
was conducting a colossal enterprise,
and he employed an army of well-paid
men. Had he been content with that
he would have prospered. But he
had the specializing spirit. He was
not content until he had risked all on
the turn Of card-and he lost his
fortune. Why did he do it? is the
inevitable question that must be
asked. Why do other men commit
the same folly? What becomes of
their conservatism, their reflection.
their common sense, their judgment3
Even ii they double their fortune by
a speculative stroke, Of what good id
it to them? 1t does not increase
their happiness. 1t only doubles
their discomfort, and makes them
dOubly anxious to risk everything
again in one grand plunge, and vent
ure all, taking the chances of going
down so far that recovery is impossi-
BILE. 1t is double or quit, and it usu-
ally is quit forever. II they double
they only double their own cares. If
they lose they go broke, and are
wretched the remainder of their
lives. This millionaire has plunged
into ruin, but the plunging will go
on, and other millionaires will 90,
like him, on a corner" speculation,
Those who are not millionaires and
don't gamble have every reason to be
thankful that they have not the
money for big plunge.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
His Reason.

In administering punishment in
the navy different penalties carry
with them reduction to lower con.
duct class. or these there are four,
the fourth being the lowest, and one
placed in it is deprived of shore leave
for a period of three months. Fol
some breach the executive officer OF
the United States ship Juniata found
it necessary to place man on the
fourth class, who decided to try to
obtain mitigation of his sentence.
With this object in view, he sought
and obtained an interview with the
executive officer, when the following
conversation ensued: swell, l..
you wanted to see me?" "Yes, sir, 1
did. l wanted to know, Mr.. b,
why you put me on the fourth class?"
"Ah, you wanted to know why l put
you on the fourth class, Ell? Well,
I'll tell you, l., put you on the
fourth class because l hadn't fifth
class to put you on. Now go for
ward" He went.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

A MAN killed himself In Philadel-
phia and left his body to a medical
college. This was his dying message,
written on postal card: "A Chump
for Observation-Disclosures: Cut my
body up to show the young cranks
how a chump is made. l have been
a chump ever since l became a man.
I owe nobody anything. l have no
money and no friends. Don't let my
friends have my body.-A Chump."
This man may have been a chump,
but it is doubtful. 1t is one OF the
paradoxes Of life that when a man
knows he is chump he is not
chump. Buffalo Express.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

tumble of metal roofs, above which
Use the gilded domes of ten churches,
while above all towers the graceful
belfry of Rastrelli. The main
church contains the shrine of st.
Sergius, which is visited by many
thousand pilgrims yearly, and scat
tered about are several holy wells,
the waters of which are said to effect
miraculous cures.
The foundation of the monastery
was laid by St. Sergius, religious of
noble birth, who, about the middle of
the fourteenth century, established
himself in this place with twelve
disciples. The strictness of his life,
his superior wisdom and the rigor
with which he and his monks sub
jected themselves to manual labor,
brought his establishment into high
repute. His counsel was sought by
the princes Of his nation; and when
in 1880 the famous Dimitri of the
Don set forth to meet the Tartar
hordes in the great and bloody VIC
tory Of Kulikova, he first received
the blessing of Abbot Sergius. Lands
and wealth were showered upon the
brotherhood Of Troitsa, but its foun-
der remained simple, laborious, and
self denying to the end. He died in
1892.
Sad troubles were in store for his
disciples. In 14O8 the monastery
was destroyed by the Tartars and was
not rebuilt for nearly twenty years.
From this rebuilding the present
Church of the Troitsa-Trinity-
dates. In 1908 the monastery had TO
withstand sixteen months siege
by Polish army 10000 strong, and
it emerged from the trial triumph
antly. Again in the same century
it repulsed the same enemy from it's
walls. Twice did the monastery
afford an asylum for Peter the Great
when he was hard pressed by fate, and
/, in turn the monarch became its lib
eral benefactor. Other rulers. too,
heaped offerings on Troitsa, and it is
rich in displays of gold, silver and
gems that rival the magnifcence of
Solomon. But esteemed above it's
merely barbaric wealth are the
clothes and the tools used by the
good St. Sergius.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

The failure of the rain making ex-
pertinent has not deferred certain
citizens Of Dakota from organizing
what they call the International
Cold Wave Company, with a nominal
capital OF $1,000,000. The promoters
of the enterprise claim to have dis
covered the secret Of producing cold
waves, and will undertake to start
one at any time for consideration.
They guard their secret very care
fully.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
A HOLY PLACE.

The Celebrated Monastery OF TroiesA,
Near Moscow, Russia.
Foremost among the holy places OF
Russia is the monastery of Troitsa,
dedicated to its founder, st. Sergius.
1t is torty-flve miles from Moscow
and stands on a commanding eleva-
ton. Walls twenty feet thick, vary
ing in height from thirty to fifty feet
and extending $500 feet inclese the
monastery, making it very strong
fortress There are eight towers
terminating in cupolas of brightly
colored metal and within the walls is
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

Old-Fashioned Cradle 1T the Fair.
Now, girls and boys, when you see all the
toys
That are shown at the great Worlds Fair.
Pray hunt up q cradle, q dear little cradle,
An old fashioned cradle that's there
And look at 1t we'll. 50 that you may tell
The people who do not know
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

house 10 painted yellow, with white
trimmings and brown roof. The
front door-of course Dandy doesn't
use 1t, as nearly half of one side of
the house is removed to let him in
and QUITS fitted with brass knob,
colored glass and a brass-handled
bell. You may imagine th.v Dandy
Is proud Of his home and that he has
lifted his short nose high above all
other dogs that have no real estate.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

A TEXAS editor was shot and killed
by Texas Judge. Things are going
wrong in the Lone Star State appar-
emily, for this Is an absolute reversal
OF the usual order of affairs. Either
the Texas judiciary Is improving or
else the Texas press is retrograding;
some sort Of evolution must account
for the phenomenal result Of this last
Affray.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

If learned astronomers are unable
to decide whether the recent celestial
display was an aurora borealis or a
comets tail the "plain people" may
be excused for thinking it was q fire
in the next town.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15


Whatever shall / call them?" said
little adaptive Mother Marguerite,
fondly. Real Mother Cat looked q
bit anxious. "I'll ask the ladies, /"
said Marguerite. ~The ladies" were
the four summer boarders. on from
the vine-hung piazza and into the
parlor went the two mothers with
the babies. Those grown-up ladies
tossed aside their fancy work and
were down on the rug in a minute,
stroking the wee kittens. Lets
each name one. This shall be But
tercup." Buttercup had blotches of
yellow. "This is Thelma," said the
next lady, who was rather romantic
and had just read a book with that
title.
M
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

The stupid turtles that didn't know how
To crawl from under the ostrichs feet
And nearly got crushed into fine mince-
meat
Oh! these are the things that one and all
Politely came to return her call,
And say goodnight to the little girl
Who calmly slumbered amid the whirl
OF all she saw at the circus that day
When she watched the @menagelie folks"
at play.
Little Men and Women.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
OUR BUDGET: OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND 90.
lNGS HERE AND THERE.

Jokes and Jokelets that Arc Supposed 70
Have Been Recently Born-Sayings and
Doings that Are Odd, Curious, and Laugh
ahle--The Weeks Humor.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

81 FRANCE reports through her Acad-
envy reform in spelling. A little
moral reform over that way wouldn't
be bad thing.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
OUR BOYS AND GIRLS.
THIS IS THEIR DEPARTMENT OF
THE PAPER.

Quaint Sayings and Cute Doings Of the
Little Folks Everywhere, Gathered and
Printed Here for All Other Little Ones to
Read.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

'1NFANTA ISABELLE are aunts of the
present child king, Alphonso XIII.
Princess Bourbon lives in the palace
with Christina, queen regent, at
Madrid. She is about 80 years of age
and IS described by the New York
Herald as very energetic and infuen-
tial in the politics OF Spain and pop.
ular with the Spanish people. While
the two princesses are unlike in dis
position they are devotedly attached
to each other. Shortly after United
States Minister General E. Burd
Grubb arrived in Madrid Mrs. Grubb
was taken sick with fever and the
Queen sent her personal court physi-
clan in attendance General and
Mrs. Grubb always had distinguished
courtesy shown and entertained the
court lavishly.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

THE criminal classes-but stay,
there has been enough said about
shyster lawyers and Doodle police
men,
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
EULALlA'S ELDER SISTER.

The Princess Isabelle de Bourbon. Who Is
Also an Infanta Of Spain.
When the Chicago papers reached
Madrid with accounts OF how the In
fanta Eulalia was enjoying herself
here during her recent visit it is
barely possible that feeling of envy
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15
THE Cunarder Campania is no..
EASILY the Queen OF the C's

THERE are more than a thousand
different things made from petro-
leum, including angels.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

A GIRL is not angry with her lover
every time she closes the door behind
him with dozen bangs.
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

How cradles were made in which babies
were laid
A long, long time ago
This one is Of wood. all strong and good:
1t has lasted for many a day,
And will always be treasured, while time
is measured,
For in 1t q President lay.
Can you tell me his name? It Is linked
with fame
His father was President, too;
And the Old Bay State had the honor great
OF giving these statesmen two
Won't tell it2 Why. yes, IL you're sure
you can't guess;
1t was John Quincy Adams, good man.
Who was rocked In this cradle, this old
fashioned cradle,
When its history began
And his children, too. and all babies new,
That into that family came,
With their laughter and and tears, for q
hundred years.
We're rocked In it just the same.
Julia Wolcott In Little Men and Women.
After the Circus.
Well what do you think our little girl
One night when she got into bed?
She had been to the circus. aid all that
she-s was hobbing about in her head
The tall CRATES and kangaroo,
The elephant. and the monkeys, too,
The horrible ape and the moody COW,
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

was experienced by
h er sister, t h e
Princess l s a belle
de Bourbon, who
is also an infanta of
Spain. Both prin-
cesses are daugh-
tiers of the former
deposed Queen of
Spain, who now
resides in Paris,
and both princesses
Wood River times. [volume] (Hailey, Idaho) 1882-1915, 1893-09-15

names, Buttercup especially. Her
heart stood quite still, though, when
the other two were named Moses"
and ACKNOWLEDGMENT" "I'll never
callthem So" she thought. The kit
tens throve as il no big names
weighted them. They became Neb
and Nose "for short" The four were
such risky, rollicking things. Every
day they had frolic in the parlor,
because 1t amused the summer board
ers. This is a true story. While
tell it, says Helen Hawley, in the St.
LouiY Republic, the little adopted
mothers lap is empty, and the real
Mother Cat is lonely, because her
children have done that sad thing
which children persist in doing
they have grown up.