The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1893-03-02
az. pLINK pLuNK on LYING.
Weshington's Noble Example of
Frobity Is His Source ofInspiration.
L., IA Na,n vi. ILL

PrObitY Is His source OF ms DiratiOn.
From the Nelo York Herald
Brother Pink PUNK struggled into the
pulpit with th3 aid of two walking sticks
last Sunday. and although the effects of his
last severe attack Of rheumatism were quite
apparent in his slow delivery and shaky
voice still be managed to show his congre.
cation that his mind is as active as ever.
and that he still holds the same pronounced
views in regard to the difference between
right aud wrong. He spoke as follows:
dearly beloved breddern am sistern. it is
only wild great scamblin' dat | hab been
able TO otticiate here to-day, but made m
nv mind dat l could not let dis golden.
dlamond-studded opportunity pass by wild
out DRAWN a few moral lessons for your
benefit.
eve celebrate dis week de birthday ob de
fader OBJ his country; de great, de gran de
only George Washin'ton; fust in wah, fuss
in peace, an fust in de hearts ob his coun-
trymen.
celebrated for a good many reasons; but de
principle dat l admire in him more dan
everything else is de lub he had for de truf :.
an dis is de subjeck on which l will preach
dis mornin'.
"Ebery body knows de story OBJ George
an de cherry tree; how his pa gave him a
Llbtl6 AK du uOW u0 CuOpp6Q GOWN de
young cherry tree for mischief, an den how
he owned up to 1t like little man, sayin',
in de langwidge OBJ history; 'Pappy, [ can
not tell lie, | done chopped down de tree
wild my little Ratchet
GEORGE WOULDN'T LIE.
"Ef George he'd ben like some OBJ de
young sneakS OBJ de present day, he'd
prob'ly hab blamed it on de cat, or de hired
man, on tramp, or on anything or any
body, so as to shift de blame off himself
but George wuz made of different kline of
stuff, an he simply said right out straight:
4 done did it wild my little axp
"a berry useful less'n kin be learned from
dis, deah breddern de great sin OBJ de
present day is lynn, an perpose to call yer
Rttenshun to few specimens OBJ de differ
ent kines OBJ liars dat intest de world an
dere various peculyyarities.
DE man dat occupies a front pew in
church on Sunday, an shouts a loud amen
10 all de prayers, an spreads bill on de-
colleckshun plate so dat de hull congrega-
shun kin praise his generousness, an den
turns roun' an spends de rest OBJ de week in
de service OBJ de debble, amt muffin more
or less dan a liar; an de TACK dat he's lynn
in SIGH toney way won't help him out any
wen he's called on to explain hisself on de
las day.
DE woman dat spohts new clothes of dc
berry lates' fash'nabe cut, SOS to glib de
naybors de idea dat her huzban' is ies'
rolIln up to his ears in money, vile in
reality he's KEEP busy maxim plans to dodge
de sheriff an his creditors, is anudder shinin'
example OBJ de numerous liar family.
Den dere's de high toned woman OATS
caught in de shopliftin' act; sometimes she's
arrested, but de affair is ginerally hushed
up on account OBJ de respectability OBJ de
prisoners family, an de ting is excused on
de groun' dat she's a kleptomaniac. 'Klepto-
maniac III my mind, in cases like dis is
only big soundin' word, used SOS to hide
de real name dat should be used, which is
'har,' wild a big, big L.
wen see man wearin' good clothes,
deah breddern, an a silk hat dat you kin see
yourself in livin' on free lunches feel kline
OF sorry for him, becuz he's one OBJ de cheap
liars, an feel like sayin' to him, 70 coed
ness sake go an sell de clothes an hat, stop
yer bluttin' an glib yer stummick a surprise
PATTY by stuf1in it wild good square meal
A FIRsT-CLAss SPECIMEN.
de preacher dat works himself into a
perspiratlon on Sunday mawnin', dear
breddern, an GIBBS his congregashun lots OBJ
good advice an den fails to show a good ex-
ample by follerin' it himself is hrst-class
specimen of dc liar breed, an as liars oo
all Kines are berry popular wild de debble.
SO de liar preacher is one OBJ his mos intimit
friends.
'De young woman dat squeezes a twenty
six inch waist into a nineteeu-inch corset,
an her twin sister dat pinches a number
five foot into number three an half
shoe, represent de foolish branch of de liar
tribe, an de only consolashun we hab in
lookin' at der case is dat dey suffer a good
deal of misery as a direct result of dere
habit OF tritiin' wild de truf.
at amt necessary fur me to menshun de
army of ornery, ebery-day liars; dey are
familiar as de sun an moon; de fisherman
liar, dat tells you how de big fish got
away ies' ez he wuz landIn'
him; de shootin' liar, OATS
full OF lies about de bears he hez killed IN
his mind de spohtln' liar, dat goes aroun'
peddlin' tips on de races; de lady. killer liar,
dat makes a nuisance OBJ himself lynn about
de different gals OATS stuck on his shape.
and de millions of udder liars who belong
to dat enormous family which moves alon ;
under de d'reckshun OBJ de debbe who l.
rightly called de father of all liars
"Deah breddren. in conclushun let me ask
yu to try an hsb more regahd TO de trut {;
eff you do anything that yu shouldn't ba1
done doan try to shiny out OBJ de RESPONSE
bilitv: doan stink like dc father OBJ liza s,
but brace up like the father OBJ yer countr Y
and say: 1 cannot tell lie! / done gone
did il wild nv little axp u