The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1893-08-26

are feeling sorry for her.
l say "her" because we seldom find q
man troubled with this mania. while
the disease seems to be spreading among
women.
Men OFTEN crave sympathy from those
nearest them, but they have pride of
sex which forbids them from demanding
1t and inpels them rather to cloak the
feeling under brave or light manner.
But when u woman Graves sympathy
you rarely find her hiding the fact. for
her happiness lies in being pitied. I
knew a woman of this sort who had
every blessing earth could offer to rem.
der her happy, but nothing made her
more indignant than to be congratulated
on her good fortune, and nothing pleased
her so much as to be commiserated.
with wealth, position and an interest
ing family she enjoyed only being con-
sidered a heartbroken woman who con-
cealed hopeless sorrows under silk and
velvet coverings. The few faults of an
excellent husband were magnified by her
diseased imagination into crimes against
her peace, and her children, which the
world regarded as ornaments to her
nome, were represented by her as thorns
In her flesh. Toeach friend at first and
gradually to each acquaintance, she con-
flded more and more of her domestic
woes until every one who knew her
name grew to speak of her as poor Mrs
A" And III time poor Mrs. A."
by constantly thinking herself an object
OF sympathy, set thought currents in mo-
ton which brought all the disaster into
her life which she could have desired il,
her widest ilnaginings. | shall ALWAYS
believe these lnisfortuncs were produced
by her mania for sympathy. for which
we might coin IL name since it is grow
ing more and more prevalent and call
sympathmania.
know another little wife and mother
today who is following in the same path
ana Will bring up at the same goal with
out doubt If we give her time enough.
compllmented her on her pretty
daughter and fine son one day, and her
lace fell, and she confided to me that her
son was great anxiety, her daughter a
great cause of worry and her husband.
while Il good man, one who imposed up-
on her all the care of bringing up the
children. "A1y life is really a burdened
one" she sighed, land few of INV friends
who see me going about with a smiling
face realize how far from happy am"
But discovered ere long that il
must be through mere accident if any of
her friends, acquaintance or neiyhbors
were unaware of her sad and hardened
lot, for to each and all had she made her
demand for sympathy One of the most
brilliant girls | have ever met was af-
fected by the mania. Her life had
known some severe trials, but they were
followed by unusual successes and bless
1ngs. Whenever she was congratulated
upon these successes or envied for her
blessings her face assumed a melodra
matte expression, and if the speaker was
a friend or near acquaintance she
dropped some remark about the cruelty
OF fate which grants what you do not
desire and withholds what you need, or
which bestows its gifts too late, until
the listener ceased to congratulate and
began to condole. From her nearest
friends she was constantly making "A de-
mand for sympathy, which was ex-
hausting beyond the power of words to
explain. Their compliments and praises
reused only her sorrow or her resent
ment, for she wished to be regarded as a
target for fates most cruel arrows. The
people who would not be sorry for her
constantly she considered devoid of deep
feeling and incapable of true friendship.
Though such person may be para
gon of goodness and a prodigy of talent,
she would become unbearable as close
friend i'll very brief time.
10 have our sympathies forever on tan
Is as fatal to the vital forces as a leaking
Dlood vessel would be. But the sym.
pathmanla friend never seems to think
OF this. If you will only weep with her,
sigh with her, press her hand in sorrow
and tell her how you pity her, she will
continue to sap your strength, even if
you should die before her eyes. This De
culiar mania no doubt has its origin in
early neglect or lack of proper appre-
citation in childhood. A girl whose sen.
sitive nature is misunderstood or ignored
by friends and teachers grows morbid
on the subject and shrinks more and
more within herself.
By and by she finds friend who SYM
.pathizes with her, and the ecstasy of the
experience intoxicates her. She grows
to revel in the indifference and GOODNESS
OF her family in order to more fully
taste the sweets of sympathy from her
friend. When she marries, she is sure to
lind herself more or less misunderstood.
and it becomes an easy thing for her to
descend to that most undignified and al
most disgraceful role Of a wife who dis
cusses her husbands shortcomings with
her friends and acquaintance in order
TO arouse their sympathy for her own
hard lot.
But friends and acquaintance ought