The Olneyville tribune. (Providence, R.I.) 1893-189?, 1893-12-23

at is a look that contains intorma-
ton on every subject in the world"
Victim in the chair says feebly
doesn't need it."-.TeXas Siftings.
AMIsTAKE IN ANATOMY.
eve lost my heart to you,' was what
her lover said.
But she found it wasn't true-he'd
only lost his head.
IMPUDENCE UNAwED.
'If you do not soon settle this ac-
count, - said the tailor to Mr.. Slopay, 81
am afraid | shall have TO commence a
suit"
"Ar right. Mr.. Shears, said the young
man in his flippant, trivial manner. II
hope you will be luckier than you were
in commencing my last one"
TRUTH IN NUTSHELL.
1t is Just as true as preaching,
Or any kind of teaching,
That a nan OF any NETT
Will call around and settle
With the printer when he has the where
withal;
' And if he doesn't do it,
Some day he's sure to rue it,
For he s:ains his own escutcheon.
And isn't worth a notch on
A stick-or anything at all.
-LBremon Ga Chronicle.
SMART NOW.
johnnie know why Freddie has been
so good lately.
Tommie- WhyT'
Johnnie-The other day. when he was
whipped for being naughty, 1t made him
smart enough hot to do it again.
Halo.
MORE LIGHT WANTED.
The professor of the Chair of Political
Economy had talked to the class an hour
and a half.
IL have tiled TO make this whole ques-
ton of the tariff perfectly plain to YOU"
he said, wiping The pcrspiration from his
glowing face, land | trust | have sue
ceed,d, Sill, if there should he some
among you who desire further light on
the matter | am ready to answer any ques-
tions YOU may ask
II think understand the most Of your
lecture, professor" spoke up a deeply
interested young man on the front seat,
''but I'd like know whether this Ad
Nalorem you've been talking about is a
man or IA woman Chicago Tribune.
4 FEEBLE UNDERSTANDING.
''Do you take any stock in that re
mark about ''boeks in the running
brooks2' said one practical young man.
~ don't know replied another; Il
understand that there's avolume OF sound
in Niagara Falls. = Washington Star.
DISTRICT OFFICE.
Customer want to complain again
of the ~slowness Of your boys.
Managcr-My dear sir, they are only
slow in business. You ought to see them
play baseball ,-lllallo.
CHANGED HIS IND
Johnnie Masher-Remember me to
your sister, BIB. aud tell her | have
been too busy to pay my respects per-
s~onally.
Bu6-Sister said | should ask some
one what was good for sore throat.
"Is she troubled that wayl'
eyes she can't sing a note
Tell her 10 try Blanks lozenges. BY
the way. | guess | will call this evening"
-lrcNas Siltiugs.
AN AMATEUR.
Joues-My wife essayed a new role to-
day, rs cook.
Brown-Miue cssaycd several.
Jones-What were they!
Brown-Light rolls, and they were so
heavy | could hear them drop when |
swallowed them.-.Detroit Free Press.
A DIAGNOSIS.
Waite-How is your mother to-day,
Tommiel
Tommie Tompkins-Well, she's better,
but not as better as she was. Truth.
I~NTELLECT.
Cholles - Ha! ha. ha. hal l just
heard such an awful good Joke.
Fwed-Wha WIS ito
Cholles-Aw I've fohgotten.
ruEoDoRE's ADVANTAGE.
"If Theodore Thomas is a musician. y
said Banks. why is il that nobody
ever saw him play a eornet, for in
stsucef'
He doesn't have to-" said Rivers.
ale can Away find some subs to toot.'
-lChicago Tribune.