Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-14
THE WILLING WIDOW.
Is Dangerous Go Say Complimentary
Things Indfscriminately.

Herald writes from Posey County: A
score of us were sitting In the shade
of the depot building waiting for the
train, which was an hour late, when
a yoke of oxen attached TO queer
looking old cart turned the corner.
They were driven by woman about
so years of age, who was barefoot and
wore mans straw hat
''Git up thar, Buckv" she exclaimed
as she laid the ''gad' on the off OK
with a resounding whack. ''You
thar, Pete, what you skitishun round
that way fur? Whoa, now Both of
yous stan STILL"
She turned them up to the platform,
threw down some nay taken from Tho
cart, and came up among us TO in
Quire of the depot agent about a
barrel of salt He was busy just then
and she was waitingaround when the
smart Aleck of the crowd, who was
travelling for wine house, remarked
in tones meant for her to overhear:
II have always said that II mar
ried at all I'd marry woAan who
could drive oxen.
"Is that meant fur me?" she asked
as she walked straight up to him.
"Are you a widow, ma'am?"
II am. Bin a widder ever since a
sawlog rolled over Jim nine years
ago"
"And you'd marry again If you had
the opportunity. would yOu?"
II would. When Jim lay dYin'
In the house he told me to marry
again If had a show.n
"Ahem!"
ut runs In our family to love. We
begin airly and keep 1t up to the
grave. What's your proposition? Pm
a plain woman, full o. bizness, and
never do any foolin'. If you've got
anything to say spit it right out afore
'em all?"
I-I don't want to marry just
now" he stammered,
"Don't eh? Then what's the use
Of getting me on my tip-toes about IT.?
You man, YOU jest the same as asked
me to have you, and l jest the same
as accepted you!"
"Oh! No, no! | merely made
some inquiriesv he replied.
Them inquiries was about love,
sir, and my hearts a thumpin' away
like all get out. l said I'd marry
agin, and / will. We are engaged.
When do you want me to be ready?"
madam, you have totally misun-
derstood me-" exclaimed the young
man as he turned all sorts os colors
and appeared to grow small. II
asked you few questions out OF
curiosity -
"Mebbe the jury will cali it curl
osity, and mebbe they won't"' she
said as she set her jaw. "TheY don't
allow no foolin' round in Posey
County. When a feller goes Us fur as
you hev it's hitch or damages.
"Tm tremblin' all over like girl,
an my hearts a tryin' TO jump out
It's reg'lar love or don't bow the
road hum. You don't leave here
young man till this case is settled"
"But. ma'am, you sec"
"I don't see nuthin' but marriage
or damages. You've asked me TO
have you. / said would. Will you
marry or settle?"
''How-how much?" he gasped, as
ne looked around and failed to find
any sympathy.
"Wall, Saginaw salt is a dollar and
a quarter bar'l," she replied, as she
glanced at row Of barrels down the
platform. 81 guess the oxen can git
hum with two bar'ls Make it two
and I'll call IL squar."
Everybody grinned except the
young man. He realized that he was
done for and got out of the box by
planking down $3.50 to the agent.
The cart was driven around to the
spot, the barrels loaded up, and then
the woman came back to say to the
young man:
"I've settled this case and the salt
is in the cart, but i jes want to re-
mark that If you happen this way
agin, and you happen to feel so
awfully cunnin' that you can't hold
yourself you'd better go slow on wild
ders, Thar's sixteen OF us round here,
an we all drive yaller oxen hitched to
carts, an we all go b'arfoot in the
summer and sigh to git married agin.
The regular figger is threc bar'ls of
salt and a pound of tea, but OWN to
your youth and that thunder storm
comm up I've let you of easy, Good
day bub: good day, all!n