The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1892-05-11
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

A tell-tale-The Gessler story.--Life.
The rabbit hunter is a hare. Drained
fellow.-Rochester Post.
Outside of diplomatic circles the fish
cries question is often purely one of YER
acity.
The time when a woman has no mercy
is when she gets a mouse in Il trap
Rams Horn.
"My IDEAS" insisted the architect,
'were all right. am the victim of mis-
construction"
1t is an aggravation for q hungry
tramp to find only fork in the road
Texas siftings.
Teacher-"H name three beasts Of
prey" Haus-"Two lions and tiger"
Texas Siftings.
One trouble with the world is that SO
many have more reputation than char
acter.-Ram's Horn.
The physician is yhe man who tells you
you need change and then takes all you
have.-Elmira Ga atte.
The man with "splitting headache"
ought to get job at making rails
Binghamton Republican.
~ hear Cholly Shmpate is sick. Have
you had any intelligence from himG"
"Not CLEAN. ."--Chicago Tribune.
The only way to win in an argument
with woman is to walk off when you
have stated your side of it.-Atchison
Globe.
Mr.. Gurley-"Are your family related
to the Scaddses, of Philadelphia" Miss
Scadds (haughtily)-"No; they are re-
lated to us. Life.
Edith-"Lord English said my image
was photographed on his mind" Ethel
Eyes, photographs are usually made
on blanks. yale Record.
Fair, rosy cheeks had Kitty Grimes.
Bright eyes and open brow
She jumped the rope 2OO0 times
She isn't jumping now.
Chicago Tribune.
Bagley (at church faiD-"Let's 90 up
and have that pretty girl tell our for
tunes" Brace-"Not any; what's the
usel Don't l know I'm broke. .
Graphic.
Sharpson-"Old fellow, you look
seedy. 1t is time you had a new suit"
Phlatz- 81 know ii, but my tailor re-
fuses to-h'm--to renew the modus vi
vendi. Chicago Tribune.
"Very pretty surset," he remarked.
eyes" she replied. ~ don't wonder
that people write about the shades of
evening, Ihad no idea that there we're
so many different shades or that they
matched so nicely"
Jeans (the porter)-"Beg pardon,
sir; have bad news for you, Mr.. Ca'h-
box died this morning. Old skinner
"Dicd this morning! Now that's just
like Cashbox. He knew this was th,
busy season. Life.
"Yes," said young Rud kins, who
sat in calm disregard of the clock, "I
may say that | am a fixture in our office
now" "I know, Mr.. Rudgkins, she
answered, gently, "but this isn't ,jouI
office, you know. Lansing News.
Mrs. Brush-"Has the Hanging Com
mittee decided about your picture YETI"
Brush-"Yes." Mrs. Brush-"Are they
going TO hang itl" Brush (dubious)-
"I heard the Chairman say he thought
hanging was too good for it.'-Brook-
lyn Life.
The Lecturer-"My hearers, shall
have to ask your indulgence for fsw
minutes. forgot my manuscript, and
have sent my little boy for it," His son,
mounting rostrum Gn loud tone.)-
"Mamma couldn't find the writin', but
here's the took you copied it from. -
Tid Bits.
OVERRIDING It: Fond Mother-"I do
so hope that George has studied hard at
college. have tried to impress upon
his mind the value Of a liberal educa.
tom Father-"I am afraid, my dear,
that you have rather overdone the mat
ter had to send him check for $500
to-day. Funny Folks.
The other day x, the Bohemian,
on receiving some money from Iich
uncle, took it into his head to square off
some Of his most pressing debts. He
first called at his tailor's and heard that
the poor man had just died. His widow,
all m tears, desired TO know the visitors
erraud 81 have come to pay my bill,
he simply replied. "Ahp sobbed out
the widow, "il my poor husband had
only lived till this morning, the shock
might have brought him round,
Figaro,