The Jasper weekly courier. [volume] (Jasper, Ind.) 1858-1922, 1892-10-07


see why a right smart woman can't
git her work done, an have an easy
time of IL half Of her time. Now, II
was woman. I'd have some spuhk
about me. and I'd do like"
.Now. John Phlatlxins, you needn't
60 about tellin' me how your mother
used to do, an all that, cause I've
heard the old lady say herself them
very same words, as is: A woman
work is never done tell she's in her
grave.
"Well, anyhow, Maricr, I'm mighty
sure that if | was woman could 90
your work an have a good. easy time
every day of my life"
II s'pose, then, Josh. you wouldnt
mind tryin it awhile, bein' man
asked the wife. pausing in washing the
breakfast dishes, and glancing cynical-
IL TO where her spouse sat smoking "A
eorncob pine, and looking through
last months paper
''Eh?" asked Josh. looking up.
She repeated her question.
I've thought Of that same thing my
self he replied, ''only ! didn't know
how YOU could git along with my work.
.Oh, YOU needn't worry yourself
about that. Josh ! kin do your work
il YOU II do mine"
Mrs. phlatkins felt safe in promising
this for when Joshua was seized with
his semi-annual ''rheumatiz.' she had
had the whole thing TO attend to many
a time Josh seemed to forget TINS, IN
his sudden solicitude for the welfare OF
his business.
-You'll have to hitch up, and be keer-
full with that off colt. cause he's skeery
of the railroad crosSin'. lie sure an
water them at Smiths we'll; an don't
let EN- drink too much. Take that but
ter 10 Squire Rubin's, an the punklns
TO Jones. an the corn TO Shears ware
house: an don't forgit TO order a bar
of salt. Marier an some bolts for that
machine"
"Oh. III remember everything" said
Mrs phlatlxius And now I'll tell you
your work for the day. You jest want
TO finish these dishes first: then wash
out that basket of clothes an hang EN-
out TO dry: scrub the floor an churn
that butte: ii orto come quick to-day
cause the creams just right By that
time the bread'll be ready to bake; an
you might put on some beans ana
squash an taters to cook at the same
time. Tor YOU and Dams dinner. After
Won get the dinner things done you can
can them Two buckets OF plums; then,
while you're resting, like. you might
mend that baslxetful of socks, and put
a patch on Dams everyday pants. Then
YOU kin git supper. an I'll try To be
back in time to eat il, an III tell you
what 10 do next.
After giving these explicit directions
Mrs phatSins proceeded to do her nus
bands err nds III the town; whils
Joshua began most systematically th'
tasks that were to be as play TO his su
perior tact
The washing was done in no time
and the clothes all hung on the line II
rood array TO bc sure, he did no
rinse nor wiring them: but these opera
tionS were only consumers of time, any
way: and they looked beautiful as the'
waved their bright blue (albcit striped
folds in the sunlight.
II seemed all foolishncss TO let III
bread stand around so long when
might Just as well be in baking
"l'll Just put it in now, with the othe
things an build up good hot fire. al
nv the time git this butter churne
the whole balin' will bc done, ~
everything thought Josh; SO he bull
n roaring fire, and went mcrrily to hi
churninr. After bobbing the dnshe
for fifteen minutes. Joshua pccped int
the churn to see how things were pre-
crossing in there.
AT that exact moment there arose
a. t,., l.n. " n
THAT blamed hawk after the'
chickens AGAIN. muttered Joshua
dropping the dasher and making di'
for his old smooth bore. which CO..
tanned a good charge of fine shot, Il
use on such occasions.
Pushing toward the barn yard he G
pied a large hawk just rising with OF
Of his most promising young pullet
while all the other =. y. P.s we
rendinp the air with their shricks al
''Ser-dawcuts"
Bang. Down dropped the pullet wi
athud and ''kuck.' which was h
last word To her sisters. Down we
Joshua with an "Ohw and i-didn
know-it-was-loadcd sort of cxpressi'
on his phiz. Up went the hawk TO e
Gle in the air, hungry as ever, but no
the worse for his great scare.
Thus il was that, when Joshua
turned to the house. he found the Fl
waning: after renewing it, he reco
menccd his churning.
"Wondcrful ! never heerd Mari
say that butter would churn itsel
muttered Mr.. Phlatkins. peering in
the churn, where the cream was in
state of strange weird agitatic
Reaching in with his hand to see WI
might be the cause Of the odd pl
nomcnon, his flesh came in cont'
with splinter. After fishing 4
moments. he drew forth the strang
looking specimen Of butter e'
churned. This roll Of butter said, II
queer. curgling voice: "Me-you'