River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1892-09-01

rage.
"A milkman, Oh, he must COZ
cried. II cannot allow this high
handed proceeding"
AN the clashin' and the baugin'
will be soInetbin' fearful.' Bridget
added.
1t was at two o'clock every morning
the household started awake in various
stages of insane terror. ON one occa-
sion, Bridget, sure that the house was
In flames, threw herself promptly out
of the window. She only fell as far as
the roof of the wash-house. brt She
broke her arm. and the surgeons bill
was Twenty-Five dollars. Fifteen and
ten added 70 twenty-five make fifty.
| had begun to keep a little record of
what it cost me 20 let my stable. Be
sides, though IL is highly respectable to
deal in milk, the clipping, stating that
L now made a living in that way,
which was sent me by dear friend
who cut il from fashionable journal,
was startling.
"ION cannot help it, YOU know"
Uncle Franklin said. You evidently
did not read the lease prepared ~ Mr..
CnPrOnOunceable. before YOU signed it.
Console yourself by the thought that
you are saving five dollars a month";
'He has brought the Guild Roy With
him this time, num- said Bridget, a
few days after this. as she sat on the
back porch, with her arm in a sling,
while 1 cooked the breakfast. ran to
look. Behold, tied to a ring on tie
stable wall, a black goat, hairy and
ferociOus, with The countenance of the
fiend hirlself l ventured down the
path 30 look at him. He evidently con-
sidered it a liberty. and, lowering his
horns, made a plunge at me. | fed IN
terror. However, he was tied fast,
and nothing happened that time.
Itwas the day en which Mr.. Unpro-
nounceable came to pay his rent
Uncle Franklin had spent Sunday with
US, and was not yet of and away. He
listened calmly at the window as l re-
mOnstrated with my tenant.
II did not expect a goat" said.
"A goat goes always init a shtable.
You ask any von," he replied. "Efer
did you see a shtable mido1t goat?
IL is lawful"
Perhaps il is" my uncle said, mild
iys ''and when you look at this" and
he spread the five-dollar hill out up-n
the table, you will feel proud of your
economy"
II was On returning from nv
walk 10 the train with Uncle Frank
lin that l passed my house without
knowing H. I could not at first un-
derstand what change had ccEae
upon it; but at last il dawned upon
me that all those fine plants which
had placed along the beds. all the
Towering shrubs and box borders, even
all the vines. were gone. And there.
beside the fence, calmly devouring the
last rose 80 Summer, by way of dessert,
stood Capricornus, the goat,
''He ate livery wan of them. and me
enable to do anything b"t sereech,"
said Bridget.
Fifty dollars worth of plants" I
mDrmured Fifty and fifty make a hun,
dred"
"He ate NJ .,y We'd shoe. muzzer."
said Tot, from the window.
"Nell, You do not egspect human in
delligence of jOOst a goat" said mv
tenant. when | entered my complaint
''And now We will let him run around a
liddel, every dave he will make your
grass down like a lawn-mower."
"Isut We have lawn mOwerr' ex-
claimed 1; land am sure it is much
better than a goat" added, goaded to
veNatiOn by the tenants GOODNESS.
Else II, mees? Veil, We will seel In
de shpace of an hour. dot goat will make
down dot lawn as it vas before never
made down"
He did. lie also made down" any
thing which hung within his reach on
wash days. and at other times devoured
straw hats. baskets and magazines. In
my little expense book l noted down,
as an item OF my stable expenses; "Fif.
teen dollars for sundries devoured by
Capricornus."
What frightful smell of bad to-
baccor' ! said to Bridget, one day.
YES ma'am," she replied. Its a
very cheap kind lac do be smoking, to
be sure"
Hep" | queried.
There's a man living over the sta
be" said Bridget Didn't you be no.
ticing il? He came with his furnitur'
three days ago" Bridget made all the
new discoveries. just then having lei
sure TO look about her.
INIT a shtable goes a man. Dot vos
de law" said INV tenant when | inter
rogated him; and, for all | knew, it
might be so.
A new surprise awaited us. One
morning we beheld upon our lawn a
rocking-chair Of ample size, and in the
chair "A woman who filed it comfort
ably as she exhibited the deepest
maternal sOlicitude to twins, while
four other infants gamboled upon the
grass; and from the grapevine arbor
emerged a cOmical old couple in knitted
caps, who nodded to us condescending-
", CapricOrnus meanwhile frisking
about.
"Exblain?" said my tenant. little
later. willingly! NV man now haf a
good job and a nice house. so he sent
for, from Chermany. his wife and chill
derns, and his old parents. Dot is all
right. Not?''
could not deny that either.
We had calculated on a large crop of
plums. and plenty of currants. They
vanished like snow-wreaths in thaw
wen in his garden a man has some
fruit. must not his family eat it?" said
the tenant of my stable. / added the
value of the fruit To my expenses.
The bulldog, shortly attached to the
premises. ate the Maltese cat one morn
ing; but was thankful that he did not
also eat the old lady, whose lawyer let
me off from a suit for damages. on pay
ment of twenty-five dollars.
The year was nearly half over. and
things were not as bad as they might
have been, when we were surprised by
festival which was held in the back
garden There were music, dancing,
fireworks and acrobatics; and many of
the guests, being too fatigued TO return
TO their homes. slept upon the porches
of my dwelling. | should not have
minded il 50 much. had we not been en-
PERTAINING Rev. Mr.. PraisweIl and fam
lily that evening. He spoke of il as an
orgy, and could never hold me quite
guiltleSs of an affair that came off in
my own garden.
We had another surprise next morn