, 1892-02-21

with society and its rules, with the
laws OF good taste in dress, and suffi-
cient tact and good feeling to set other
people at their ease and to feel easy
ones self.
Now. l know very we'll that this def.
milton will not meet the views of a large
class of excellent people, who will ex.
claim in holy horror:
"Oh, do you put good breeding and
taste in dress, or even education, above
a good Christian character and modesty
and industry and the moral virtues gen
erallyY'
To which | reply: Certainly ! do not
In fact, 1 place the things you mention
above those | mention, but l consider
them as characteristics of ~womanhood
and not of ladyhood. A person may be
a perfect ady in the exact sense of the
word, and yet be a very contemplate
woman, and she may be an admirable
woman, and n most valuable member OF
society, and yet not a lady. Why, then,
must everybody be classed under the IT,
tie OF conyentionality and despise that
of nature, especially rs the former is
much more within our control thar the
latter?
ANY woman can make herself an
honor and a glory to her sex by develop
ing the Unborn power and beauty of her
womanhood; any woman can rise by
her own persistent efforts to the first
rank among the women of the world
with far more certainty than, as is often
boosted, any free porn American man
may rise to the presidential chair. She
has but to use the faculties, the will, the
mind and the persistence which are hers
by birth, but it is not every woman who
a become a lady by her own efforts,
and self made ladies are never very sat
~isfactory to themselves or to anybody
else. There is an ease, an unconscious
ness, u gentle assurance of manner and
a calm expectation of consideration
from other people which are seldom if
ver obtained except by birthright, and
the lack of which are fatal to the per-
lection of ladyhood. As | said before,
these traits may be Joined to a bad heart
and a shallow brain, but still the per-
son remains a lady, just as the Cauca-
sian remains a white man, although he
commit every sin under the Decalogue.
Would any n willingly confess to the
bad heart and shallow brain for the
sake of being called a lady? | think
not. Then why struggle SO blindly for
n title which may mean both?
You will say that all ladies are not Of
this description, and that many women,
not ladies, are just as bad. True enough,
but then we nave no choice as to being
women; no matter how fine or how good
a lady is, she is primarily a woman, and
80, - -, lar 1.,,, aon.a~ l. x.
an in the eyes of all men, and the advan-
tage of this side Of the question is that
a good woman is obviously one; you
cant mistake her; she carries the air of
it about with her, as IL it were a robe of
office. How often have smiled into the
face of some dear old, toll worn, weather
beaten creature whose good honest SOU
looked out through her poor tired face,
and all unconsciously proclaimed, q
good lives in this uncomely
body, and | have given her a friendly
word, or pleasant look, or perhaps a
little present in appreciation of the hon
or she did my SEX. But | never called
such an one a lady, nor would she have
called herself 30; she was something
better.
v q nv hcb AAChh w "a kaht AhNAto
are never placed in lowly situations, or
that they are any the less ladies for fill
ing them. One lady of my acquaintance
became so reduced in circumstances that
she vas glad to accept the position of
scrubber to the floors of some of our pub
lie buildings, and did the work faithful
ly and well until something better was
offered; nor was she any the less a lady
while on her knees washing those floors
than she mad been when, robed in silks
she received her guests and did honor tc
her station.
Many a lady, too, has followed hel
husband to the western wilds, and Will,
he delved and hewed and conquered tn,
wilderness iR one fashion, she cooked
and washed and scrubbed and sewet
and made that same wilderness to bios
som like a rose with the grace and charm
of her ministrations. But the gentle
man did not cease to be a gentleman
nor the lady u lady because Of theii
rough toll; they simply found it easier
on that account to rise up to the true no.
bility of manhood and womanhood.
But although every woman cannot
achieve for herself the ease and uncon-
seriousness n nameless air that are the
birthright of certain of her sisters, she
may with care and thought become
ladylike, and often, very, very often,
one meets ladylike women among those
industrial classes who are the backbone
and vitality of our community, But a
woman of this description, especially il
quite young, is often sorely puzzled to
know just what manners, what occupa-
tions and what use of language are lady.
like and what are not, and perhaps il
any such chance to read this paper they
viii not resent a few friendly hints upon
the subject
In the first place, then, the true lady
is always self controlled; she has hel
temper, her bodily movements, hei
modes of speech just as much in hand a:
n good coachman has his horses; SHIT
may be very much exasperated, but I'm
less she chooses she makes no demonstra
ton whatever of the fact; if she doe,
choose, she often utters very cruel ant
cutting words, but she utters them in
quiet, restrained voice, without gesture
and certainly without raising her voice
nothing is go absolutely unladylike a