Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1892-01-25

New York when it is opening up SUBJ
way on a hot day shows great possible
ties, but it cannoy get in the little trills
and throbs of measly and antique stencil
that this homemade and fermented ink
did
Once | went over to try case before
poor white justice of the peace over
thirty miles away. He was a plain, un-
educated man, who used his tongue in
writing and breathed heavily, like
mush kettle, while thinking.
Opposed to me as counsel was a man
who had been admitted to the bar.
had not. He was rather pompous, and
hated to try case before a country JUS
tice, but he had to do it. He was hot
and cross, and while he was making his
argument one of the children got an
acorn up its nose and we had to stop
and bore it out with the iron worm on
an old ramrod. That made counsel
mad, and while he was making dila-
tory motion the Square picked brie1
out of the palm of his hand with Bar
low knife and overruled it.
Then counsel got so hot that he for
got himself and said things to the court
which ought to have remained forever
uusaid After that the court got angry
and threatened to commit counsel for
contempt. Counsel allowed that the
court did not know enough to draw the
mittimus
"'All right, will show you,' says the
court. and thereupon he bit off a piece
of tobacco about the size of PRAYER
book and took down large, fat volume
of forms for justices of the peace weigh
ing about nine pounds and smelling of
pork gravy and childhood.
He wrote on and on till dinner time.
Then he glared at the man he was en-
gagged in committing and ate the IN
demonstrative corn dodger with him
meantime.
Il didn't mind the bitterness between
the court and counsel, for it was all
good for my side. After dinner the
Square rolled up one corner of the oil
cloth tablecloth and went on with the
mittimus. All that afternoon, with
bullying eye and wet brow, while oppos-
ing counsel sat and smoked under the
| cool shadow of the cottonwood, the
broiling gentleman on the superheated
woolsacll painfully wrote on.
Toward twilight, as the frogs in the
hollow snote the soft and echoless
cleaning with their metallic song, the
| court closed with the final whereof fail
not at your peril and the commitment
was duly drawn.
Looking over earnestly at it and lean
ing on the shoulder of the court, | can
| still see the calm, pale face of counsel
| as he looked searchingly over the still
wet and fragrant document.
''Then firmly and deity upsetting the
big, quart ink bottle over the mighty
legal masterpiece, and thereby turning
| loose upon the Mortified night fra
| GRANGE 50 able, so durable and so pro-
| nounced that you could tie horses to it,
he said:
There, you overgrown mushrat!
| Gou shapeless paunch of justice with
out its brains; you overgrown and
fungus error ON the face of nature; you
old he mud hen of the swamps; you
malarial old intellectual wart on the
| brow of creation, by the time you can
| go down on the bottoms and gather your
maple bark and bring it home and boil
it, and put the caustic fragrance into it
for another quart of ink, Will be in an
other county; and by the time You can
draw another mittimus will be in most
any other state which l may select.
81 now bid You adieu. Caulifower.
Au rerOir, old Polypus on the men,
brane of nature, blight upon the great
| job of creation, farewell"
He then kicked the old mother dog
across the kitchen and strobe fiercely
down the child bOrdered pathway.
y l