Alma record. (Alma, Mich.) 1878-1928, 1892-01-29
PiTH AND POINT.


Some men give train of thought
too light IA load for smooth running. -
Columbus Post
No matter how mall the scandal
there's always enough o. II 10 30
Ground. --Elmira Ga tie.
Some Of those bon great appear TO
be tryi Z very earnestly nowadays 10
live it down. -Indianrpolis Journ;e.
What did You get for your birth
day." "A watch-chain." Where is H.?
Let's see it," Cant. It's with the
watch. - jewelers. Circular.
One of the greatest mistakes a man
can make is to sit down at desk and
worry himself sick over business and
then call it Il days work Washington
star.
Marriage seems never SO much a
failure 10 a man as when something
goes wrong at home that nc can't pos
sibly blame on his wife. -Atchison
Globe.
Charlie (who has stayed late)--
"Oh Miss De Freeze, I've an idcan'
Miss De Freeze-"Wcll, an idea is not
much good unless you carry it out
He took the hint and his hat. -Yonkers
statesman.
We're it not for the escape valve OF
sizing up our acquaintauces behind
their backs, all the police and all the
armies that ever were or will be would
not be ample to keep the peace. Dos
ton Transcript.
Didn't Suit Her. Briggs-'I see
that CRANKY had TO send back the mar
bic statue of his wife that he ordered -
Griggs- Why? Didn't she like it?''
Briggs-"No; she wanted one made
wearing sealsllin cloak. Cloak Re-
view.
neutrality-suspicious. bump of inn
agination is abnormally large, sir. You
should write poetry" Visitor-"I do
write poetry. Only yesterday took n
poem TO an editor, and that bump you
are feeling is where he hit me. Don't
bear on it so hard. "-Tid-Bits.
Deacon Jones (solemnly)-"My
young friend, do you attend place of
Worship" Young Man-"Yes, sir,
regularly. every Sunday night" Dea-
con Jones-"Pray tell me where you
90 TO Worship" Young Man-'T'm ON
my way to see her now.'-Demorest's
Magazine.
Moved the ity.-Stranger- Why.
| thought either City" was located
here?" Native Well, stranger. il
was located here, but last week news
came that a railroad was goin' TO cone
along eight miles north, SO the whole
city moved over to be on the line. IN,
y. Herald.
Servant ito professor who is very
busy with an eXperiment)- Excuse
me. professor, but take the liberty of
calling your attention TO the fact that
it was twenty-five years ago, from this
day, that ! entered your service
Professor But my dear man, must
this be just to-day Fliegendc Batter
Literature Didn't start Them. -
Eastern Man-"Yes, sin, it's a shame
the way this sensational juvenile litera-
ture is turning the heads Of boys, and
sending them west TO fight Indians
Western Msn-"Did you ever meet any
Indian fghters?" NO Why?' Moth
ing. Only most of them can't read. -
Street 81 Smiths Good News.
The Proper Size Student-"Wo
want badges for our graduating class.
We have adopted as a design "A graduate
surveying the universe" Jewcler-
About how large would YOU like the
figures?" Student think the grad
uate should cover about three-fourths
of the badge and the universe the re
mainder. Jewellers Weekly.
That Made Difference. -Twynn
81 wish you would lend me five dollars,
Triplett. ! want to so out of town.
Triplett-"lIere it is. Are you going
to be gone long?" Twynn NO, I'll
be back tomorrow. Triplett (replac-
ing the bank note in his pocket ION
second thought / find | shall need il
myself.