Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1892-07-28

Son of Superstitious Parent" Cause |
ma saws it's nnlucky to have 10 at table"
--Dahdee Weekly Ne'rS
81 always get up in a crowded car
and give seat to a lady" remarked
Widgley. LUCKY dog" returned his
corpulent friend. 81 always have to
give up two seats. ~ Chicago Mems.
Featherstone- "What did your sister
say when you told her ! was here in the
parlor waiting for her Y Bobby
"Nothin'. Bnl she took q ring off one
finger and put it on another. life.
WHY NoT2
There was small lrChin named Guy.
Who had eaten too much apple-puy
He'd groan and he'd suy,
And out loud he would crly,
20 Goodness, ] know ] shall duy !"
st. NifloioS,
"Reen any callers?" asked the Hon.
Mr.. Blunks. Eyes, one answered his
secretary. Patent medicine man was
in TO see what we would charge him for
getting a few testimonials into the Con-
gressonat Rccord."--IadSdnapoIis jour
nal.
She-'I never loved any one until |
met you" He-"And never kissed q
girl before in my life" And little
Johnnie, who had been behind the por-
there, tripped softly away whistling; II
am something Of a liar myself." -Neac
YORK. Herald.
Presence OF neutrality-suspicious.,
a shentlemans haf fallen troo de coal
hole !" lsaac--"Clap tie cover Offer him
kervick, Ilein sohn, vile ] runs for a
policemans. We must arrest him for
tryin' to steal te coal, or he'll sue us for
tamages. Life,
"lIow is your father coming on?'
asked Col Ierger Of darkey he used
| to own before the war "lle am dead y
dead, is he? Hemust have reached an
advanced age" Gle did dat, for fac.
He was libin up TO de berry day oh his
def. Y 1erds Sytiass.
Its a pity to let all those old settlers
drown" said Mrs. Noah, US the ark
tul. said Noah, with chuckle. zone
Of 'em was telling me yesterday that
this storm isn't a marker to one he re-
membercd back in l76090. Life.
I Friend--"W What on earth are you doing
| to that picturc?n Great Artist-"I am
| rubbing u piece of raw meat over this
rabbit in the foreground. Mrs. DE
Shoddie will be here this afternoon, and
when she secs her pet dog smell of that
rabbit she'll buy it"--Neso FORK Weekly.
Mrs. Brown--lsn'th shanleS Here's
a baseball pitcher that gets $4,000 a
year and there are plenty Of clergymen
who do not receive $500. Mr.. B.-But
il is just possible, my dear, that the
pitcher has better delivery than any
one Of those clergymcn. ~ Boston Tran
!, script.
Did you destroy this feather buster y
asked Freddie's mother. "Yes'm,'
answered Freddie; If wanted to be an
Indian chief "But don't you know
that feather busters cost money 2?
queried his mother. 81 did, said Fred.
die; but Indian chiefs don't think Of
such things"
He-"Do you ever mean to marry 2
Perhaps may sometime" He
"Have you made up your mind who
the man will be-" She" Mercy mol
. Hes Still you think you will marry
somebody some time? Shell may
He Desperately" Well, what's The
matter with me p! S0merOitte Journal.
The prominent citizen walked out Il
, his barn the other morning under al
, umbrella and said to his old dark,
hostler: "Well, Samson, aren't 70,
praying for this rain to stop?' mo, in
deed, sab, its no use prayin' to d
Lord to stop de rain when de wind an
in de east. "--KansaS City Times.
Spriggins' Little Game. Friend lat
French play Why did YOU applaud S,
vigorously when that comedian mad
!. his speech before the curtain? Sprig
/ gins confidently so folks would thinl
| ! understood French What did he say
Friend-He said the remainder of hi
part must be taken by all unierstudy, a
/ his mother was dying, G0oa News.
J Conductor -"Can't take that six
$ pence, sir" Indignant Passenger-'T
c like TO know why not" Conductor
Its too smooth" Indignant Passenge
! --"Well, that's cool. You gave me tina
|. very six pence ON this car this morning
d got it from you MS change" Conducto
n Well, you see, sir, we are NOR
/ particular than you arc,"--Dwadt
IPcChiy Ne@s.
!, "Ees," said the old geologist, at tn
:. country store Symposium, that's tn
/ stone that has the fossil footprint
& though there are none 10 this piece,
6 An old farmer, who had just come il
took up the piece Of rock, and "heftea
d il thoughtfUlly. "Seighnor," said III
e tits as heavy and as hard rs IRON an thu
Y FOSSIL or whatever Won call il, must hay
! had powerful hurd boots to make prin
4 in it,
n Bill Plumbottle, one Of the most il
telligelt youths Of Harlem, who ha
. been travelling all over Europe, returne
y not long since, and told his frienC
% many remarkable things Of his iourne
= Among other things he said "In Ron
r, ] had a long conversation with Il
le Pope, and from there ! went to Berli
and had 81 talk with bismarck; then
" Travelled to Munich, and - IAN
y met Munchausen," interrupted one Z
y the listeners mo, but | Travelled
~ the Same car with Tom Ochiltree."-
" TeEds Sttin9s.
le a story is told Of an lrishman namS
II Pat, who lately came to this countr
=, recently. One day he found rour
"A bit OF tin, stamped with tho name Of
er big brewery. a policeman whom
er consulted about it told him for iol
e, that it was five cent piece, So F
w went into a saloon and called for 4 bee
N lie drank it and showed the piece of /
shn across the bar. The barkeeper pusht
i it back and said why, man, that
n. tin" And Pat replied: Faith and is
II, tin? ! thought il wor five; have gla
Sc yourself thn.n - 7fibuRG
ne One morning when Rufus Choa
" entered his Office his clerk rose and sal,
to "Mr. Choate, a gentleman has Just le
a.. 4