The Sedalia weekly bazoo. [volume] (Sedalia, Mo.) 187?-1904, 1892-06-14
Rev. j. n. Van Wagner Went
Round the Kite shaped
Track i'm 60 Minutes
Sunday Night.
He Gave a Moderate Sized Audi.
ence q Menu Of Honey,
Kite Shaped Track,
Base Ball, Etc.

he was not eccentric.
Hence, the parson was in the flesh
and at his best Sunday night denoun.
cling wrong, UNFOLDING right and roast
ing evil doors.
After the platter was passed by two
bright young men who looked as il
they might like honey, the Rev. j..
NJ. Van Wagner took his text Pro.
verbs 25:16:
''Hsst thou found honey? Eat 60
much sufficient for thee lest thou be
filled Herewith, and vomit it 3"
Such old honey eaters as DR.. S. K.
Crawferd, Albert Hoss, Clark Richie,
Fred Wagenlander, Joe Evans, Albert
Parker, J. NJ. Hall, VIM. A. Craw-
ford and many others we're present.
Mr.. Van Wagner opened his preach
ing by telling moderate sized au-
dience that he did not preach very
often, but when be did he endesvored
to cay something that no one else
would think of. He thought the
church was no place for levity or for
sensationaliem.
There is just as much religion in a
emile as there is in tear. Some PEG
pie thought there was q great deal Of
dignity, sombreness necessary to be
religious. That's popular error" said
the parson, with considerable firm.
ness.
Nothing so sweet as honey" said
the speaker.
Fact, brother Van Wagner, and
some wicked people mix it with peach
brandy. 1t is known in the vocabulary
Of those who drink gin as "peach and
honey"
1t is ripe Thanksgiving and stays
that way until it blossoms on the end
of the nose of the drinker, usually
about the 18th of March.
"A proverb is a great thing and one
can hang much on them" And this
text is one of these kind. Honey
makes people, children and the hired
girl sick if they eat too much.
Then they heave up just as it they
did not like it.
The BAzoo will here relate an Incl.
dent of the early history of Sedslis,
before the kite shaped track was built.
Sam and John.
Their names was not that but one
of them lived in Sedalia.
They had both been to the races and
wagered their money on the right crit
ter.
They won.
They irr gated with strong fluids.
They walked to the city.
When about Grand avenue Sam
leaned against . lamp-post and COM
menced to throw up his dinner.
"Ssm," said John, alphabetically,
"are you sick?"
''Sick," retorted Sam between vom-
its, "you blanked fool, do you think
I'm doing this for fun?"
To illustrate the text the BAzoo
suggests that they, too, had been eat
ing "honey."
Mr.. Van Wagner said that there
very few things in this world wrong
in themselves, but it was the abuse of
things. viz:
Honey.
Base ball.
Politics.
Dancing.
Kite-shsped track.
The abuse of these things m axes the
vomit come, and the person playing
q star engagement in the vomiting
business don't have his stomach re.
voting until he or she gets to the sin
full surfeit of honey.
The ardent theologian then paid a
fine tribute to the equine race.
Noble animal.
Almost like a man.
Something like a mule.
Any medicine that will cure horse
is monstrous helpin' to man in most
cases.
That is the reason horse doctors are
so popular with the people, the BAzoo |
supposes.
The preacher then wiped his brow |
and complained of the heat and asked |!
if the house was properly ventilated. |!
But he proceeded to dish up honey !
and sandwiched between a
good many things that he spoke truly |
and we'll about.
Kite shaped track.
1T isin my mind In wakeful hours.
81 dream of kite shaped track at |
night"
He went on to tell that the work
me q employed on the kite shaped
track passed his house in great num-
bers every morning and evening.
The preacher was not averse to q
fast horse. A 30 gait was . good