Essex County herald. [volume] (Guildhall, Vt.) 1873-1964, 1892-03-25
Ia GRIPPE EXPLAINED ~
We, Us & Co

Ia GRIPPE ENPLALNEN ~
MIR. EDITOR: | am sure that
the inhabitants of this mundane
sphere will feel a great satistac-
ton and render unto Caesar the
| things that are Caesars, when
they learn that their mortal enc
my, Mr.. l.. a. Grippe, has to all
appearances passed i'll his chips.
My acquaintance with the alore-
said warrants this assertion. NV
acquaintance with His Cusscd-
ness has been long and varied. |
have. studied his characteristics
from every conceivable stand
point, and am free to confess that
| know nearly as much about the
subject as | did in the beginning.
have, however, think, learned
some things that may be Of in
tcrest and perhaps benefit both
the people at large and the mcdi-
cal profession.
After long and varied person
al contact with His Imperial Gus
scdncsS am convinced that the
aforesaid is compilation of ali
the most aggravating diseases
they have in Shcol, and was dis
covered by the devil PATHOLOGY
; cally clothed, a Congencr othoops,
+ horns, bristlcs, and birthstone,
, supra-phySically expressed. He
or it is both singular and plural,
and has several hundred thou
sands of self-contradiCtions. The
down of it is up, and verse vice.
THAT latin is correct You may
have a dozen visits of this maLa-
= dies at one and the same time.
The leading symptoms are those
antithetiCal to them. They move
forwards and backwards syn
Il enormously. still maintaining
their integrity, being curably in
durable, and incurably durable.
y No man can say his prayers and
attend to the grip" at the same
l. time. Men of the world, who
. are not insane, swear luridlv
5 when they have got him or it
> whichever it is-and women and
preachers think cuSs words in.
ternally. | don't believe it is
y wicked to swear when you've
got the grip or the grip" has
y got you, as the case may be.
' knew one man who tried to re
main good while under a vista
u ton, and in a few days he was
le compelled to explain the matter
70 to His HOLINESS in person.
never knew person so tenacious
IS of life but would prefer to take
:. the chances of getting into HEAVIER
% a few days before His Hoofness
got grip" at him rather thar
l. take another collar and elbow
lie wrestle with Mr.. Grip in fu!
vigOr.
,e The versatility of "grip"i is only
limited by the limit of versatility
: 1t is the most and meanest kind,
of disease known to humanity
When a doctor is called to treat
a case of it, or them, whichever
in it happens to be, my advice is
"don't do it" But if he is
whelmed with an influx of thcra
e peutic inspiration | would sug
gest advance backwards in youl
proceedings to the end or begin
ming, whichever it may be or not
be. You can treat it from before
backward, from behind, forward
% or sideways, endways, perpen
dicularly, Numerically, circum
ferentially, singly or doubly, con
cretely or abstractly, high or low
pressure, it is all the same. L
will make no difference to the dis
&c ease, nor in it.
From what | have written
think the intelligent reader vii
be able to form something of al
opinion in regard to what | hav,
learned through months anC
or years of study and observation
I'd concerning this naladies, o,
III whatever term may be applied
to it, (you can't hit it wrong
anyhow, and ifmy opinions co
= incide with Others, all right, i
ST not, why form one for yourself.
le Yours Truly,
A. RANDALL STOKES, M. D.