davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01
II MAZDA Than Sick

The town of Dexter can boast the hardest
hearted set Of wags to be found anywhere, says
the Lewiston (Me.) journal. The most Of them
are constantly on the lookout for the subject of
practical joke, and hardly a day passes that
they do not find one. The latest is on the fresh
cigar drummer who thought his merchandise
better than anything of the sort on earth. In
his travels he carries in his coat pocket a big
cigar case and advertises himself and his goods
by giving freely of his brands to any who will
smoke them. He was in Dexter this week The
day was hot and he left his coat and cigar case
on chair while he sat in the cooling draught
IN the door. One of the jokers got rubber
comb and brokeiout twenty teeth. They were
small and sharp. Into the end of each cigar a
rubber tooth was pushed, and with a small nail
the tooth was driven in out of sight.
Inc tobacco leaf came together, completely
hiding the tooth. Then the jokers waited for
the FUN. Soon the cigar man, now well cooled
down, began business. Going into a store he
first gave away cigar, which the Intended Gus
TONER began to smoke. Soon the Hfr was odori-
ferrous not with a sweet and fragrant smell, but
with one not unlike that OF old gun locks or
burning rubber boots. The customer sickened
and threw away the weed, and said he had on
hand cigars enough to last all summer. An
other dealer had similar experience. Still an
other was given days nausea and when that
drummer got through with his gifts he was
hated by nearly every cigar dealer in town. He
packed his goods in sorrow, and does not know
to this day that an old rubber comb from the
table box OF q hostler wrecked him CONNER
ctally in Dexter.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01
Afraid he wouldn't Pass.

He was a man well along In middle age and
was willing to be insured, says the Chicago
Post. The agent has prepared his "spplca-
tion," and turned him over to the searching
scrutiny OF the accomplished medical examiner.
might as well tell you, doctor, 10 begin
with, that ours has been family of fatalities
and sudden deaths, said the applicant.
The examiner looked serious as be replied:
Why, you seem 20 be in excellent physical
condition. What did your father die Off"
Heart disease"
That's bad. How old was hei"
"Ninety-two."
UNI And your motherf'
She g gone. too. Killed at a crossing"
And her agef'
Mother was 8 little over 70"
DO you know the age and cause Of your
grandfathers' deaths?" continued the examiner.
Yes, indeed. Fathers father died lust a
week after his Goth birthday They ss d he used
Too much tobacco. Mothers father was only
81: Falling down stairs finished him"
and your grandmoth
One OF EN- had consumption at So, and died
OF II In no time. The other was nipped by sun
stroke at "a. o, they all went QUICK"
Inc examiner did not seem so grave as he
asked: Have you any brothers or sisters!"
one sister and two brothers." was the an
swer' John went out into the mining country
when he was r. got into trouble there, called a
drunken man liar and was shot. Henry was
drowned at SO trying to help save two young
She's awfully careless; ate lot OF green stuff
the day OF her golden wedding, then danced in
the evening with all the old fellows out on the
lawn, even after 1t was raining; took her two
days to get over it. She'll 20 10 hurry like all
the rest some of these times
-. Wen, said the medical gentleman smiling,
II think IL chance you, and don't believe your
application will be turned down at the home
ONCE. Only you must look out for yourself
are so years old ~
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01
BRIGHT BITS,

| LITTLE JoHNNY-Wnl God let it rain to-mor.
| row, mamma?
His Mamma-No, dear; Mr.. McAllister gives a
picnic and won't permit it-Truth.
HE who knows lit tie and knows IT, knows
much, is the class motto at the Kansas State
Agricultural College this year. 1t is not often
that as much truth as that Is expressed In nine
words,-Kansds City Star.
GEOMETRY according to Stiles: Thompson has
| two legs. A chicken has two legs, Then Thomp-
/ son is a chicken, for things equal to the same
| thing are equal TO each other, both being equal
to two legs. bennington Seminary ReUtel0.
TIE BASK CAsHIER-You insist on my having
fortune before marry your daughterf
| The Bank President-1 do, sir.
| The Bank Cashier (Ieaving)-Very we'll sir; l
| shall have one before evening. And, by the
way, you will have no objection to the ceremony
taking place in Canadat-L4ts.
HEAD SALEsmAN-That last lot Of sun shades
| doesn't seem to go.
Proprietor-What's the price of them?
Head SalesmaE-Two dollars apiece.
| Proprtetor-mark them down to 81 90 and
put the extra salesman on that counter to at
| tend TO the rush.-NetC York Press.
FIRST SHpwREcKED YACHTsM Ant won't hold
| us both, Bill. I'll let go and you save yourself
Second Shipwrecked -Yachtsman-But, man,
| you have wife and family and haven't.
First Shipwrecked YRchtsnan-Yes, 1 know
but have an engagement with the dentist to
morrow, and am satisfied. Drops of the
| log)-Nelo Orleans Times Democrat.
This compound conundrum" business is
spreading. There is q hotel man In New Hamp-
shire named Gale. The other day one OF the
guests sprang the following question on the
| company: Why is Mr.. Gale bllnds" And the
answer is as follows: "A gale Is wind; a wind
is a zephyr; zephyr is yarn; yarn is a tale; a
tail Is an attachment; an attachment is an affec
ton; affection is love, and love is blind."-Neao
York Tribune
WANDERING WILLIAM-Go 10 that corner
house, Tommy, and ask the Teddy to hev the
kindness to feed two pore, starvin' men out of
work.
Tommy the Tramp-Not If knows it, Tree
weeks ago inkwred there for assistance and
they asked me to wash up before eatin'. may
be prosecuted by the cruel hand of fate but
amt goin' TO be insulted.-Chicd0o NetCs- Rec
ord.
They were organizing a land company when
Jobson said to Hobson, We've got every thing
ready. I've got an artist to paint a picture Of
the land as It is, and another as it will be ;"
But where is the land? Have you bought it
YETI"
Bought it? Why. how can we buy it until
we have sold our stock?" responded Jobson, who
prided himself on being finapcier. 1T takes
money to buy land. "-BoSton Transcript
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01
Official Haacisnnan-

Gen. Stevenson's record as First Assist
ant Postmaster General includes the re-
moval of a good round number of repub-
lican postmasters Their official heads fell
'for cause"-offensive partisanship or some
thing more, for although Gen. Stevenson
believes in the responsible party having
control of the government, he is not a
spokesman. He believes in enforcing the
civil service laws, and they were not disre-
garded during his term in the postoffice de-
partment. However, the republicans are
attempting to fasten the derisive title, 1.-THE
headsman," upon him.
If the title is meant to imply obloquy, the
republicans hurl boomerang every time
"headsman" is applied to any democratic
candidate. For, passing over that shining
success as an official executioner, James s.
Clarkson, where is there to be found more
ardent and active "headsman" than Presi-
dent and Candidate Benjamin Harrison2
His record In the matter of removals from
office is too fresh in the minds OF the people
to require specifications. Every city in
which there are federal offices furnished
proof Of his activity, Savannah among the
others.
He is "headsman )" and he does not deny
it. Hear him in his little speech to the con-
graduating crowd after his denomination
by the Minneapolis convention: II have
felt great regret that l was unable to find
suitable place for every deserving friend ::
but have insisted that did not disparage
those l could not appoint to place" Not a
word about enforcing the civil service law,
not regret that he found the clamoring
horde's opportunities for the offices, held by
faithful and efficient officials when be came
into power, too loud and persistent to be
disregarded; he only regrets that there are
not offices enough to go around among all
of his friends. A vote for Benjamin Har-
rIson was the test of friendship which be
would reward; personal qualifications
counted nothing. He decapitated demo-
cratic officials as long as he dared, or there
were victims left, and was only sorry when
there was not more patronage to bestow.
In the light of this declaration OF the
Presidents, the civil service plank Of the
republican platform means nothing. The
candidate is a spokesman. II be should be
reelected he would uphold the partisanshIp
of federal employees, as his Postmaster Gen
eral did in the Baltimore cases, and would
chop OFF the few democratic heads in the
public service just as soon as he could, and
with the offices thus obtained pay off his
political debts.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01
PERSONAL.
SENATOR HoAR has recently been the guest OF
Lord Ohief Justice Coleridge in England

SENATOR HoAR has recently been the guest OF
Lord Chief Justice Coleridge in England
WILHELM BuscB, the German caricaturist,
has made 81 900, 900 from the sale Of his funny
books
GEN, s. C. ARMS rRoSG Of the Hampton Cva)
| Institute is in Stockbridge, Mass, for the sum-
mer. He is still in feeble health.
! Ex-SEcRETARY W. G. WHITNEY has the Ameri-
can flag flying from his residence on Narragan-
sett avenue, Newport, in honor OF the demo
cratic nominations.
JERRY SIMPSONS opponent for congress out
| in Kansas calls Jerry "a sockless ditch digger, ="
and Jerry retorts by calling his opponent my
! neighbor, gentleman scholar, and mighty
! good fellow"
REV. ROBERT LOWRY, author and composer Of
| Shall We Gather at the River?" and Miss
Mary l. Runyon, both of Plainfield, N. J., were
married on Monday in the Fifth Avenue Baptist
| church. New York.
Miss GRACE LEwEs, eldest daughter OF the
late George Lewes OF England, the husband Of
! the famous novelist, George Eliot, is on a visit
TO Daniel H. Harkns, also Of England. but now
| occupying typical English country home at
white rams, near Ophtr Farm, the residence
| OF Whtelaw Reia.d oItE
h Il SAID that, Mrs-,W ]. Florences daugh-
ttepby her dhrstl husband, Josephine Florence
II thera, Viii star he4t season in The Col
/ 9nslsG She inasrrisd ben very young, played
! In amateur societies. and at one time aspred
| TO la an oBafAg eingek Miss Shepherd is
! handsome woman, -sE5aRke German, French and
| Italian, and, Hkqher mother is a magnificent
! dresser. III
| HENRY Weld FULLER. the only brother Of
Chief Justice Fuller, of the United States
supreme court died at the residence of his son
| in New Rochelle, N. Y, on Tuesday. The de-
| ceased was president OF the Illinois State
| Blicroscopical Society for several years. pres-
dent OF the Allan Pharmaceutical Association,
| member OF the Royal Mcroscopical Society OF
London, and president of the Young Mems
Christian Association of Ohio.
SPEAKER Of the intimacy between Emperor
William and Poultney Bigelow, the Water.
| bury, Conn., american says that the latter
gentleman is probably the only person who Is
privileged to call the young kaiser Bill" This
is how II happened The two had been close
comrades at school, comrades whose intimacy
survived the separation of maturer years. and
CHANGED to meet not long after William became
the kaiser. Bigelow addressed the kaiser as
'H our Majesty Don't your majesty me"
the kaiser is said to have replied You are an
American, There is no need OF formalty be-
tween us. am bored to death with it from
people who have to be formal. To me- you will
always be 'Poultney.' So to you will always
be William. That settled it, and Poultney
It is candidly reported, has always since
shortened William to ''Bill, In true American
fashion. ...t.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01
The Central's Finances.

There was a feeling OF depression
in business circles yesterday when it
was announced that,the Central was not
paying the dividend on Southwestern stock.
The failure to meet this fixed charge was
interpreted to mean that the Cen
trail would default upon other
fixed charges which become due to-
day. This Interpretation, it seems from
our dispatches this morning, was correct.
If what the New York EUenjng Post says is
correct, and there is no reason to doubt that
it is, it has been determined by those who
we're depended upon to loan the Central
enough money to meet its obligations which
are due to-day to let the Central make a
partial default with the view Of bringing
about a Reorganization of the entire prop
erty.
The interest that the Central is paying on
some Of its obligations is regarded as too
high, and. judging from what our dispatches
say, it is believed It can be 80 reduced as to
place the property upon a sound financial
basis
The information with respect 10 the mat
ter is rather meager for the reason, doubt
less that the plan of reorganization is NOT
matured. having been decided upon prob
ably only after Drexel, Morgan & Co. re-
fused to undertake the reorganization OK
the Richmond Terminal It is stated, how
ever, that Mr.. Conner is acceptal
BILE to the friends of the road
and will be retained In his position.
His retention would certainly facilitate
any plan for reorganization that might be
adopted. The holders of the roads securi-
ties have the utmost confidence in him,
knowing that he will consent to nothing
that is not for their interests, and believing
that he is fully capable Of managing the
property 30 as to produce the best results.
The dividend on the South western will be
paid to-day. and it is understood that some
of the other fixed charges will also be paid.
The default, therefore, will only be partial.
There are so many persons in Strengthened
circumstances in this city and state, whose
incomes are almost wholly, if not entirely,
from Centrals securities, that 1t is to be
hoped that If a reorganization Of the prop
erty is undertaken it will be completed
quickly.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01
wn,tnev the Man for the Place,

The feeling among the democratic leaders
that Mr. Whitney should be the chairman
of the democratic national committee is
very general. His acceptance Of the posi-
tion would give satisfaction to all parts Of
the country. In New York he would be
acceptable to Tammany and TO those who
were represented by the Syracuse conven"
tfon.
AS to his qualifications there is no ques-
tion. His management OF Mr.. Cleveland's
interests in Chicago was admirable. 1t was
SO able that it was commended even by
those who opposed Mr. Cleveland's nomina-
ton. He succeeded in accomplishing his
purpose without irritating those who did
not agree with him, and he adjusted diff
cuties that many thought could not be
adjusted. He showed himself to be clear
headed. cool and far -seeing manager. 1t is
not q matter Of wonder, therefore, that the
whole party should look to him as the man
to conduct the campaign for the Democratic
party.
There is another thing that is well worth
considering. He has Mr.. Clevelands con-
fidence TO an extent that few other men
have. They have been close friends for
years, and, with Mr. Whitney in charge of
the campaign, MIR. Cleveland would feel
that nothing that could in any way con-
tribute to democratic success would be left
undone.
Mr. Whitney is a member of the Tammany
society and is extremely popular with its
leaders. His influence in 80 responsible po-
sition as that of chairman of the national
committee would be sufficient to allay any
feeling of unfriendliness that might still
exist between Tammany and those who
called the Syracuse convention. In
word. he could bring the inharmonious
elements In the party in New York to-
gethor and induce them TO forget their
differences Under his leadership every
democrat In New York, and in fact the
whole country, would work enthusiastic
ally for victory and would fell confident OF
securing it.
Mr.. Harrity, of Pennsylvania, is mem
toned in connection with the Craftsmanship,
and he is equal to the responsibilities OF the
position, but he is not 80 well known as Mr..
Whitney, and IL is doubtful If he could In
spire the party with so much enthusiasm.
1t has been stated that Mr. Harrity would
accept the Craftsmanship of the executive
committee If Mr.. Whitney would take the
place of chairman Of the committee.
If this arrangement could be made the
Democratic party would be we'll equipped
for the battle so far as leaders are con-
cerned. With Whitney and Harrity in the
places of responsibility the democratic cam
paign of 1892 would be memorable one
for skill, vigor and enthusiasm.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01

The MoRNTNa NEWS is on file at the following
places, where Advertising Rates and other In
ormation regarding the paper can DO Obtained
NEW YORK CITY
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@, P, RowEIL & Co., 10 Spruce street.
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The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01

Ten years ago if any one had suggested
the possibility of the German government
assuming hostile attitude toward
Prince Bismarck, the chief factor in the
unificatlon of the German states, he would
have been regarded as mentally unbal-
anced. yet such state of affairs now
exists. Another peculiar change brought
about by the whirligig of time is the rela-
ton existing between the German press and
Prince Bismarck. During the hight Of his
power the newspapers felt his iron hand on
numerous occasions, even to the extent Of
persecution; now he appeals to the press to
assist him in his fight against the govern
ment
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01


The MORNING NEWS is published every day in
the year, and is served to subscribers an h'
c1tp at 81 90 a month, IS 90 for six months anc
SO 90 for one year.
The MORNING NEWS, By mad, one month
81 90; three months, 81 20; six months, b %
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without Sunday issue), three months, 81 W
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Wednesdays and Fridays, or Tuesdays, Thurs
days and Saturdays, three months, u So SIX
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The SUNDAY NEWS. by moil, one year. " LUZ
The WEEKLY NEWS. by ndiL, one year, ~ -.
postal order. check or registered letter. Cur
rency sent by mail at risk Of senders.
Letters and kilograms should be sdoresSeu
"MoRNINe NEWS" Savannah, Ge-
Transient advertisements, other than special
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Fourteen lines Of agate type-equal 70 one
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known on application at business onlce.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01

AS the Fourth of July this year falls on
Monday, the New York exchanges have
resolved to have three full holidays, Satur>
day, Sunday and Monday. The exchanges
in other cities will probably follow New
York's example, so there will be no trading
from Friday to Tuesday. The merchants
of this city would do we'll TO follow the ex-
changes to the extent of closing their places
of business all day Monday. The brief
holiday would do the clerks and themselves,
a great deal of good and there would be
such small loss of trade that it would
never be noticed. 1t is said that all the
merchants in town except two have agreed
TO close, II these two can be brought over.
1t is to be hoped that before Monday they
will conclude to give the clerks a chance.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01
INDEX TO INV ADVERTISEMENTS.

decentralization Lodge No. 4S, F. and
A. M
SPECIAL NoTIcEs-Interest Notice. Chatham
Bank; Interest Notice, Oglethorpe Savings and
Trust Company; Dividend Notice, National
Bank of Savannah; Notice to Plumbers, Build
ing Committee Savannah Volunteer Guards;
Proposals for School Supplies; Bathing Suits,
Falk Clothing Company; Notice. E. j. Thomas
Dividend No. as. Southern Bank of the State OF
Georgia; Interest Notice Southern Bank Of the
State of Georgia; Oficial Order as TO Insurance
Companies, w. j. Northern, Governor OF the
State of Georgia; Wanted TO Rent, Box "a,
Morning News ONCE Grain Dealers Close July
4; Dry Goods and Millinery Merchants Close
July 4; Notice, Hull & Lathrop; Interest Notice,
Germania Bank; Dividend No. 81, Merchants
National Bank; Interest Notice, Savannah Bank
and Trust Company; Notice, Title Guarantee
and Loan Company; Dividend No n, South
western Railroad; Change in Copartnership,
Charlton, Mackall & Anderson; Notice. Citizens
Bauk of Savannah; Notice Of Dissolution,
Waters & Hall
, AUCTION SALEs-Three Dwellings for Sale, by
]. D. & D. D. LaRoche, Auctioneers; sundries,
by J. H. Oppenheip & Son.
PULL Down Your SIGN OF DIsTREss-B. H.
Levy & Bro.
BATHING SUITs-Falk Clothing Co.
BANK STATEMENTs-Oglethor Savings Bank
Chatham Bank.
OUR LINE OF NEcKwEAR-Appel & Schaul.
SHoEs-W. L. Douglas Shoes.
LEGAL NOTICES Citations from the Clerk Of
the Court of Ordinary of Chatham County.
Observation-Disclosures Female Seminary,
staunton, Va; Wesleyan Female College, Ma
con, Ga.
CHKAP COLUMN ADVERTISEMENTS - Help
Wanted; Employmsn t Wanted: For Rent; For
Sale; Lost; Found; Personal: Miscellaneous.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-07-01

Justice Bradley, of the United States
supreme court. died five months ago and
the vacancy thus created has not yet been
filed. Mr.. Blaine resigned twenty-eight
days ago, and his successor has been APP
pointed. In the one case the President is
not limited as to time in making an ap-
pointment; in the other be is required to fill
the vacancy within thirty days The SUI
preme court is an institution not less inn
portant than the cabinet; then why should
not law be enacted providing for supply
ing vacancies in the supreme court within
thirty days? There are said TO be excellent
reasons why the vacancy should have been
filed long ago.