West Virginia argus. [volume] (Kingwood, W. Va.) 1877-1946, 1892-06-09
MR.. AND MRS. BOWSER.
Bowser Goes Grab Fishing.

People passing up and down the
river the other day, saw middle
aged gentleman in plug hat and
business suit seated in scow beside
an attractive lady. feeling around
among lot of strings pendant from
the side Of the boat and warming the
lady that she could not keep too
quiet.
"Now my DEAR" observed Mr..
Bowser, don't you move, because
feel crab oA this line. I'll pull
him up until ho is in sight ard
then you slip the net under him.
See -"
" Yes, dear" replied Mrs. Bow
ser a little illustrated as she contem-
plated her share of the performance.
4" But Mr.. Bowser, what shall | do
when get the net under him ?"
"Scalp him, Mrs. Bowser, scalp
him - retorted Mr.. Bowscr, draw
ing slowly on tho line. Now
wait, he's there" and Mr.. Bowser
became even more cautious IN his
movements. :" See HIM There
he is Scalp him, quick".
Mrs. Bowser jabbod the net into
the water and swashcd around with
great vigor.
" What We doing?" yelled Mr..
Bowser, Strengthening up and g,ar-
ing at her, as the crab struck n line
for Newark bay. "What d yc
think / had there, the bottom of
the river? What did you suppose
we were trying to catch, church
Take it out ! Give 1T here - and
he grasped the lady around the
waist and took the net away from
her.
Did ] scalp ?" asked Mrs.
Bowscr, flushed with her cxertions
and trembling with excitement.
Show him to me ! Let me see
what he looks like :"
" Looks like - roarcd Mr..
Bowscr. lie looks like Sandy
Hook by this time Why didn't
Won scalD him . What's the matter
with you ?"
"I-I couldn't tell which was
his head" faltered Mira. Bowser,
who hadn't seen anything at all.
" Pull him up again and you'll see
if don't scalp the last hair on his
skull v' The English language
lost it's last charm for Mr.. Bowser,
and he turned to his strings with a
wlthering look of contempt for bis
wife. "Now you be CAREFUL" " he
said at length. {" Here's another
yarmlnt and you must not let him
get away. When say scalp" you
shove the net under him and just
bring him aboard"
'Can you see him YETI" asked
Mrs. Bowser, waving the net over
her head and pccring into The
water.
Wait Yes, there ho is Care
full, remember. Now scalp - lie
must have been a crab Of phenomc-
nal scholastic advantages to have
gotten rid of that swoop, for Mrs.
Bowser with q view to redccming
herself went for the end of the
string blindly, but with a strength
OF purpose that made failure i'm
possible. She not only got the
crab, but she slammed net, crab
and oil over Mr. Bowser's head.
wah--h!" shriekod that
gentleman as he felt himself i'm
pounded.
Lost him agun," exclaimed
Mrs. Bowser, who hadn't the
remotcst idea what a crab looked
like. Why dear, what's that, an
awful big spider in the net ?
Good gracious Take it of -
/ howled Mr. Bowser. "Tako it,
WOW ! the thing has got me by the
car Haul him of, will you?"
Mrs. Bowser dropped the handle
Of tho net a. IL it were an old fash
ioned bonnet, and gazod upon her
husband IN conformation
coast the crab =. yelled Mr..
Bowser, tearing the net away.
Let go, you brute! Wah--ha"
and the unfortunate man wrenchcd
I the fish from of his ear aud dashed
+ It in the bottom OF the boat.
whats your scheme in doing
I ttf - l.. l......1.1 l.f.f..