The Columbia herald. [volume] (Columbia, Tenn.) 18??-1935, 1892-07-08

In truth she was II pretty lass
Who gazed into the looking-gIass.
She murmIre1 rs she gazed again,
Ppm sure / was not made in vaini"
And echo answered "Maiden- vainv'
~
There was considerable nervousness
among the population of Gainesville,
Mo-, some weeks ago, besides a marked
increase in the attendance at church and
Sunday-schoOl, because in zinc mine
there the ore at depth of only eighty
five feet was 80 hot that it could not
be handled without heavy gloves. A
few days ago one of the State biologists
made some Investigations and reported
that the great heat was caused by the
decomposition of pyritc and not necessa-
rily because of any proximity to Pluto's
dominions. Since then the attendance
at the revival services has fallen OFF.
~
Keep your face with sunshine lit
Laugh little bit"
Gloomy shadows oft will fit
II you have the wit and grit
Just to laugh little bit.
~
y Boston merchant has II gymnasium
for his female employees, who are pro
fessiOnally instructed from five to six
o'clock every evening. There are six
hundred of them and their employer has
To treat them all with the gentlest con-
sideration lest he be knocked out in
one round.
Cherish this sacred writ:
"Laugh n little Bit"
Keep IL with you, sample it
Laugh a little Bit"
Little ills will sure betIde you,
Fortune may not sit beside you,
Men may mock and Fame deride you,
But you'll mind them not a whit
If you laugh IA little bit.
-
During the May term of the Superior
Court at Caribou, Me-, a number of aliens
were naturalized, among them an Irish
man. When the clerk put the question:
ADO you renounce all allegiance to the
Queen of Great Britain and Ireland?"
etc, the Colt replied: I'm go back on the
Queen; but, young man, I'll never go
back on old Ircland-neverw The law
yers smiled, the spectators Uttered and
Judge Robinson laughed outright. The
candidates conditions were accepted,
and he got his papers.
-
a tramp muy he :twll ~ lazy, l3a !ru:t.
Yet when hes cnufu.t ia 80 lai
Hen work like a beaver To dig himself out
With on y n ten penny ma l.
-
A cali with a single eye, no cars aud
five LOGS is tho joy az Way 10 r"nrty, la.
II IL now over mnnth old AMI i,,us lair
To grow into fun COW hood.
We have all forgotten ihe ~ ri".si o'j
maid Of tho olden time. Sho ha- Nv, II
place to more loVeHbIe aud uttra' two
type Of wOmanhood. The modern old
maid is sweet-tempered and jolly, with
dimples in her cheeks ard n laugh az
musical as tho bobolink's song. She
wears elegantly fitting tailor-made
gowns and becoming ornaments around
her plump. white throat. She goes to
concerts, parties, suppers, lectures
and matinees, and she does not go alone.
She wears killing bonnets, and has live
poets, philns rphers. and statesmen in
her train. In fact, the modern old maid
is N good if not little better than the
modern young maid. She has sense
and ability as well As dimples and
curves, and many of them have bank
books and dividends. But this is not
all. 1t is hor sweet womanly presence
that comes to the house of sorrow and
brings the peace that passeth under
standing. II is she who comforts and
soothes the weary and suffering and
brings the sunshine of hope back to fad
ing eyes. Many of us have sweet chap
tors of praise in our hearts for the dear
old maids. God bless them.