The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1892-12-26
The Bull and the White Elephant.

Our esteemed Bangkok contemporary. the
Siam Free Press. is in II mental condition
which reminds tho students OF Bretanoloyy
Of the anecdote recorded in tho "Parali-
pomona" OF JoANNEs BoUs. "A certain
Euglishman," says BoUs. had crcpt into
Elysium by accident. and in conjunction
with a fcw OF his countrymcn. priests of
the god SNoBos. attempted revolution.
Being seized and brought before MINos.
RHADAMASTHUs. and EACUs. What have
you to shy for yourselves?' said the
Board OF Permits for Navigation on
tho Plutoniln Shore. May it please
Your Workshops. answered the spokesman
OF tho Englishmen. there were four
OF rs in Elysium. and we found that the
manners OF the rest OF the inhabitants were
beastly, III short, un-English. For its own
gooh. therefore. wo determined to take pos
session of the country. administer it. and
make it thoroughly English" Tho Eng
fish wore sent to penal colony named in
honor OF tho favorite English adjective.
'HpmObaplies. continues the byzantine
chroniclcr aud since that time the Eng
lish have been kept ont OF EIysum US II
faut-tindlng and cncroaching race"
Now tho Siam Free Press has exactly tho
disposition which was punished by the Ely
hium Exclusion act. The Siam Free Press
represents the tistful of Englishmen
IN Siam who pass their time in damning
the country and insisting mt annexation
to Great Britain is its only salvation, AMI
yet rend their hair and their "sputs" when
II Is suggested to them that If they don t
hke Slam they arc entirely free To leave it.
What? Leave Siam and allow 1t TO sink
into the depths OF barbarsm again? Take
from it its only hope? Why, the mere
thought of 1t produces six brandy-and-
sodas and touch OF apoplexy at tho United
Club. And as for the English economist OF
the Siam Free Press-but you can hear him
hore. In fact. you may have to protect your
nostrlls as well rs your ears before you get
through with Brer BULL as he hurls his
anathcma at the realm OF siam:
IF we are to judge the sianess Gov-rnmsn. by tho
dissatisfaction OF the vast majority OF Europe In
slam with the present r.gims, then It must 20
down TO endless psrdition And It is surely .
poor argument TO advance because you are dssatis-
lied leave the country: because the chimney smoke
destroy the houae. because sick commit suicide would
: DO an equally logical conclusion For assuredy IS
soon as the helping hand OF European influence is with
drawn 30 soon will Siam fall into the exterior darkness
OF primitive bArbarism. To suggest such a rOurKe 10
one OF the most vicious ana unfriendly acts the
s'smeks, who must the folly OF their
present course and ultimately attain higher things II
dastsrdy attempt to put back the clock :iiza
ton aud delay the benefits of intellectual moral and
material progress in siam attack which she might
expect from he7 bitterest enemy rather than from
bought friend"
by Europeans you underst and English. of
course. Siam Is liable TO fall into the hands
OF the French il 1t waves away its dearest
friends. the English; and the French wear
wooden shoss and say Yin when they mean
wine. and are frivolous. nay. worse an ar
tistic people. GOD save the On! GOD
save Siam from the French! Bring In three
more brandies and sodas. MAI PAW. you
Siamese beggar, you!
And while MAI PAW Is busting, hear
the gentle remarks OF the Sam Free Press.
and the ha penny OLIVES OF siam:
slam owes what little progress she has msde to tho
Europesns who have spent their lives here She
depend on Europoaa skill on European brains oil
European management IN every department OF the
kingdom. without European and she is helpless =
child toterng along tho brink OF prscipcs and every
moment IN danger Of being dashed to pieces. The iAu