The Bossier banner. [volume] (Bellevue, Bossier Parish, La.) 1859-1952, 1892-01-14
NUMBER 46.
PUNGENT PARAGRAPHS.

Mr.. Golly-"Your beauty almost
makes me fear you" Miss Maud-"O.
there's no danger of your catching it."
N Y. Herald.
Did the rainmakers never think of
trying stage thunder on large scale to
produce rain? 1t always succeeds be-
hind the footlights. ts.-Buffalo Express
-"Do tire you?" he asked, after
speaking for half an hour of his hopes
and ambition. 20. no." she answered,
sweetly; ~ have been asleep. p."-Har-
per's Bazaar.
-Bort-"Do you believe that house
can be haunted?" Hort-'Of course.
Why, my house is so haunted by tailor
that don't like to go there at ALL
Lowell Citizen.
Easily Satisfied. ed.-She-"You say
that my consenting to marry you has
made you very happy" He-"Yes-
You see what simple thing it takes to
make me ppy."-Yankee Blade.
A Stoical Sufferer. - Dorothy Ito
married friend) -"Do you still find
Charlie to be the hero you once thought
him?" Mabel-"Well, yes. He hasn't
once complained of my biscuits, al
though / can hardly eat them myself.
News" Defined. - First editor
What is your definition of news?"
| Second editor-"News is the sort OF
thing our rival across the way habitually
| doesn't print. ."-Somerville Journal.
-Macready Ham--"Did you starve
when you were stranded in Dakota?"
| Hamlet Booth-"No, sir; boiled that
| cloak of mine l wore in The Silver
| King and ate it for an omelet. "-Bos-
| ton News.
A Hint-Papa (up stairs) s)-"Maude,
is that old man gone yet?" Maude-
"Whom do you rnean?" Papa-"Cholly
Hicks" Cholly Hicks-"I'm not an old
man" Papa-''You weren't when you
arrived, l know-but time flies, Mr..
Hicks, time flies. IN. Y. Sun.
-Parent-"I came to inquire on be-
half of my son about the situation. you
advertise. l don't know as he will suit
you. He has just graduated frorA col
lege and" Shopkeeper 80, that
doesn't signify. What he knew before
he went there will probably come back
to him in time. boston Transcript.
An Unrefned Dog.-'Tl1 get even
with those next door neighbors of mine
if it takes thousand years. They
have trained that miserable cur of theirs
to howl every time sing" why, that
is the strangest thing ever heard of.
You don't mean to say the dog had to
be trained d"-Indianapolis Journal.
-Gray-"I took those ladies into the
stock exchange, and expected to hear
them complain that there was so much
noise that they couldn't hear themselves
think; but they didn't seem to notice il
at all. don't understand it" Dunn
30, that's all right Those ladies are
members of the sewing circle in oul
parish. boston Transcript.
Pat Got There just the Same
Paddy Doolan went into a shop on'
day to buy eggs What are eggs to
day?" Eggs are eggs, to-day, Paddy,
replied the shopman, looking quite tri
umphantly at two or three lady custo
mers who happened to be in the shop
Faith, I'm glad to hear you say so,
replied Paddy, ''for the last ones l go
here were chickens brandon Buck
saw.
81 wish I was a star" he said
smiling at his own poetic fancy. :
would rather you were comet, sh
said, dreamily, His heart Oeat tumuls
uously. "And why?" he, asked tenderly
at the same time taking her unresistini
little hand in his own; land why?" h
I repeated, imperiously. "Oh!' she said
I with brooding earnestness that fel
freezing upon his soul, because the
J, you would come round only once ever
e fifteen yearsr'-Pilgfim's Progress.
q ----