The Portland daily press., 1892-02-04

at, but Few Succeed Iu-You Must
Write About Twenty-Five Jokes Day
to Keep the Wolf from the Door.
Especial Correspondence.l
NEW YORK, Jan. 2S.--The joke col
Emn, which is feature of every we'll
ordered newspaper, is an interesting
thing to study. Most of the jokes of
today are in the form of dialogues, but
oftentimes the best and brightest say
ings are contained in single line.
These jokes. gathered from all sources
and invariably credited to the various
papers where they originate, are as
much an article of commerce as the
queer carvings that you see displayed in
the windows of Swiss villages, and they
command certain scale of prices vary
ing according to the standard of the
papers in which they appear. Whole
families are supported by them. The
milk which the funny mans baby sucks
from it's bottle is bought with the bright
saying which came to the father the
week before, perhaps when he was fear
full with anxiety over the child's life.
Whole houses are furnished by jokes,
and the bright feather on the bonnet of
the funny mans wife may be the symbol
of a passing thought, caught and placed
in the mouths Of imaginary beings,
who are continually standing on corners
or reclining in easy chairs, as we see
them printed in the funny papers. The
joke business is as much branch of trade
as the bakers, and is just as serious
matter to the people who make their
living by it. But there are compare
lively few men who follow this occupa-
ton, and practically no women, so that
in column of jokes it is no uncommon
thing to see several which were written
by the same man, though originally pub
lished by different papers.
A very large number Of young men
who enter the newspaper field try to
write jokes during some part of their
career. but most of them fail. While
hundreds are writing jokes, but few sue
coed in their efforts, and even these few
are handicapped in many ways by cir
cumstances. The man who makes a
business of writing jokes and has his
living to make out of it must be prolific
and capable Of continuing for an inde6-
mite period. Not more than half dozen
men in the whole country do this. The
rest earn their living in other ways, writ
ing jokes when they can, to make their
income larger.
The most successful writer of dialogue
jokes that ever lived was undoubtedly
Philip H. WEIGH, who fourished on the
New York Sun, and whose sad death in
February, 1889, is still remembered by
thousands. Mr.. Lord the managing
editor of The Sun, told me recently that
he had seen WEIGH turn in fifty jokes
day for month at a time. These jokes
he would distribute around among the
various papers. His income was said to
be about 81 900 year, but in reality it
was less than this. His jokes are still
floating around among the papers, ard
in a certain weekly English publication
the writer sees sometimes as many as
four or five in a single issue. The prices
Of jokes range from twenty-five cents to
three dollars.
Each funny man has system of his
own, but in a general way the jokes are
sent outin patches of fifteen or twenty to
each paper in turn. It would seem that
the paper that pays the most would COM
mand the first choice, but this does not
always follow, for the funny man likes
to get his rejected matter back quickly
so that he can turn it over to another
paper, and sometimes for this reason he
will send his batch of jokes out to a
paper that pays dollar and pays cash,
rather than to paper that pays little
more and keeps him waiting for his
money, particularly if his rent is nearly
due. Of course the most successful
funny man is he who has business
knack about him and the foresight
to keep enough cash ahead SO that he
can afford to wait little while for his
money and get more of it. The price
paid does not always determine the
quality of joke.
A paper which pays but fifty cents for
its jokes may have better selection
than one which pays much larger
price, Editors are obliged to read so
much funny matter that it is not strange
that their mental focus should occasion
ally need readjustnent. 1t frequently
happens, for instance, that paper
which pays two dollars will copy from
another paper joke which it has re-
jected a short time before.
There are about twenty five papers that
use and pay for jokes, and unless a
funny man has some system he is likely
to send the same jokes twice to the same
paper. One Of the best systems has been
devised by young man who has writ
ten several thousand jokes since he be-
gan, two years ago. He writes any
where from ten to twenty-five jokes, and
then numbers them on the back each
with the same number. He writes this
number at the head Of the page in
miniature account book and devotes a
line to each paper. He recently gave
the writer page from this book, and it
is here copied:
sss.'s'.s.'ss...s'.....
: Lot No. 81:
May 18-Life Is, took
25-Puck 81, 4"