Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-11-27

..
her marcel saws in a loud tone to her frient
thar if YOU had succeeded in getting it yol
would probably have run away with 1t
| as ANYBODY could see by looking at yol
that YOU were thief by birth and educa
| tion. =.
| We worried through all these difficulties
| and MANY more, and Maude made another
attempt to secure tickets. The crowd wa:
even greater here than below, and 1t wa:
more Impatient The bridge train was IN
sight and we all stepped on one another
feet in our eagerness to eaten IT, l was
crowded into corner and jammed farther
and farther into it, till L could reel my
slender form penetrating the tracks IN the
| wall and the thought came over me that
| thev would have to wash me out OF there
with mop. Presently saw Maude cast
IN before the ticket window like bit OF
vreckage on the Johnstown flood. She had
pennies in her hand She counted them.
There we're but five, and the fare is cents.
Then she went for her pocketbook. 1t
wasn't in her pocket People behind her
were howlipg for her to hurry up and get
out of the way. She accused everybody in
general of having picked her pocket; and
then suddenly she remembered where IL
waS
And the Crowd Howled.
"Howdyr' she screamed, "give me my
pocketbook!"
The crowd howled. I attempted to get
out of the crack in the wall, but 300 or 400
people in front of me somewhat interfered
with my movements Maude was pushed
away from the window, and carried by the
box in which the tickets have to be de-
posted.
"Ticketp yelled the man at the box
III 1nr
1 did not wait to see how he bore this afaic-
tion, 1 made q break for the ticket win
dow. inserted my unoccupied thumb into
nv pocket, and pulled out a coin. 1t was
penny; I thought it was q
dime. Then 1 tried 1t again, and
pulled out the same penny once
more. 1 knew that there were IL
dimes and only one penny in that pocket,
SO relying on the theory of probabilities l
let the penny slip back and tried third
time. knew by the feeling of the coin
which came out that it must be the penny
again, SO 1 dropped it on the floor. 1t
proved to be dime. I stopped to pick it
up, and q tall man carrying something
which, from the nature Of the impression it
made when he dropped it on my head, I
took to be a small cooking stove, fell over
me, followed by his wife and three chill
dren. However, recovered the dime, and
succeeded in working my way up to the
window. 1 laid down the dime with my
thumb, and endesvored to pick up cents
change with the same member. Anybody
who thinks he can do that, can get a good
bet on with me at any time Finally, q
kind-hearted gentleman picked them up tor
me; and few seconds later found myself
on the other side of the box, where in a
swirling eddy of the crowd, our family was
reunited.
Worse Than o Football Game.
But it was now necessary to board the
train. The surging sea of people bore us up
another flight of steps, and we found our
selves upon the platform whence the trains
start Here policemen whose labors make
those of Horatius and his companions, at
that other bridge, seem like Sunday
school picnic, shouted: Pass up forward.
Plenty of room up forwardP They are
obliged to say that, or the crowd would over
whelm them. 1t is shocking to think that
men, by the nature of their employment,
should be com mpelled to lie more than 2, ,0o0,-
600 times in the course Of o single after
noon.
We went up forward, not because we be-
lieved the police, but because we could not
help it. The crowd was going that way,
andth settled il. Presently q train was
pulled up to the platform The gates were
opened. There was a mad rush, such as
Hefelfnger, late of Yale, never dreamed of
in his most murderous moments. Direct
ly in front of me was woman.
1t wasn't Maude, for she was already in
side. She has faculty for going through
crowds which is very valuable to her, and
deleterious to others. But the woman in
front of me appeared to be having q hard
time. l tried to shield her from the crush.
bent my back, and dug nv heels into the
platform, and it seemed as If several thou
sand pounds of dead weight lay on nv
shoulders. At last we were inside. My
overcoat was twisted so that il buttoned in
the back; parcels in my hands were crushed
to shapeless masses; but had one consola-
tion, had done my best as gentleman to
save the woman in front of me. She turned
toward me in the car, and 1 prepared to re-
ceive with modesty the expression OF her
gratitude, bus she only turned 10 her CON-
panion and said, in voice audible above
the groans and laughter of the crowd: 81
should think that great, tall manster would
be ashamed to push q woman So"
An Interrupted Defense.
Maude had secured q seat, and I edged
over in front of her. 1 bent down to say
something in defense of my conduct regard
ing the other woman, when man sitting
beside Maude suddenly arose and my face
went through the top OF his derby hat He
had intended to give his seat to the only
pretty girl in the car, but in the confusion
incident to our collision big woman with
a basket, which 1 think contained Linz
burger cheese and boiled dinner, got the
seat
So we pushed one another about, and
girls giggled and men opened ne wspapers
in such a way as to hit somebody in the
nose with each hand, and at last we reached
che other side of the bridge. Then the
gateman opened the gates and We all rushed
pell NELL through them, while the police
men uttered their very best Joke: "Step
lively, plesseP' addressed to crowd that
was simply tearing its way along.
HOWARD FIELDING.