The Helena independent. [volume] (Helena, Mont.) 1875-1943, 1892-08-29
Here Lies John Jones
In the Only Place for Which He
Never Applied.
Portland Transcript.

1t has come to pass that woman now dis
putes the possession OF the field with man
az a drummer. Women travel for every
thing and sell everything. They are found
mostly i'll small businesses. whore the Or
ders for goods are confined to a few dollars,
but occasionally there is one who vies with
her tlossy brothers and takes orders for
thousands of dollars. One OF the most sue
cessful of these female dIummers who has
visited Denver, and who travels extensively
ever tho west, is Miss Green. She is a large,
masculine woman, and she seldom enters a
drug. paint or hardware store without ef-
footing n sale. She can show orders for the
past few years ~aReregating $780, 600 worth
OF paint. There ia one familiar drummer
in all the western cities, who 10 at tho St.
James. She sells satin advertising banners,
which are printed will the rules and hung
uron the door Of every room in the hotel.
You have noticed them, with their little
bangle fringe. She ia a most voluble talker
and usually gains her point. There ia
another and very handsome young lady
who travels for a lace factory. She sells
to all of the wholesalers, and il a
good authority on the subject. She knows
more about lacss than most Of her male
competitors. One lady who has been reg
istered in a Denver hotel sells draperies,
and she il most artistic draper. selling
often large bills. She handles only the
smaller stores. Women sell toilet articles,
health waists n braces. hose supporters,
patent articles of every description, millin-
ers' trimmings, buttons and everything i'm
.aginable. The number is growing largely
every year, and a woman now may travel |
with as much freedom as a ~man.-Denver
Sun.
The comma is very useful in its place, but
it should be used with judgment. In the
last number of an exchange there appears
an advertisement in which the firm an
nounce that they keep "oheok mozambique
corset laces, figured muslin hairpins. and
embroidered grenadine skirts" -Savannah
Republican.
Among the multitude Of Washintonians
who went to view the first battle of Bull
Run was an intelligent Irishman who acted
as messenger in the treasury department..
When the tide OF battle turned against the
AOASoS, AO 4OpAAEoA ~ "dauluk- |
ton with something like haste. A few years
ago a visitor at the department attempted
to tease him by saying: "Well, Cornelius,
| understand you were in the battle of Bull
Run and ran away2" Faith and l did,"
said Cornelius, and them a. didn't is there
yet."-Boston Traveller.
Gen. K. E. Frazier tells this: "There was
an old negro who was called General
one said to him. Uncle, I did not
know you WAS a general oh, yes. its easy
to be q general after you get to be a COLI
onel,' said the darkey. But l did not
you was a colonel Oh, yes, I was
born one; I was horn in Kentucky.'-Lew
iston journal. 4
st. Peter-Well, what can I do for you?
Glib Stranaer-I dropped In to see if You
didn't want you life insured.
"But we don't die here.'
"Of course not; by our system you settle
in 1000 annual payments of 800 each. If
at u time after two years you don't like
it, tho policy has a surrender value equal TO
the full amount paid in, with interest added
at four per cent"
oub "ueIo 10 tne bQAFeQOlOofo make
money by such a systemY"
I'VE invest the money paid in yearly in
stallments, and with the profits pay tho sal
aries of the officers"
"But the shareholdsrs2"
ooh, the shareholders. They have the
OF visiting the locality directly
across the gulf from where We now stand"
A minister in the east said: "My breth-
rem. the collection will now be taken for
my expenses for a trip, for I I'm going
away for my health. The mo- l receive.
he longer | can stay The largest collt O.
ton ever made in that church was taken.
And now the question under discussion ID
whether the size of the collection was a
compliment to the preacher or much the re-
erse.-Louisville Western Recorder.
NANCY HANKS 10 MAUD g,
You ve had your dazzling day, my dear,
u Maud, you bonnisst girl OF bonner.
But still pass you with 4 tear,
indeed 1 DO, upon my honor;
! m first at last, but to the end
III over be your fast, fast friend!
You wish me joy2 A Thousand thanks.
Sweet Maud, the turf's world r.moLs dan III
ion have tie heart OF Nancy Hanks tier
The time: 2:U1 and Il:
I'm sure that you will not b, miHed
On hndinS | am rather swift
lienceforth in every equine set
Tbs pueen Of queens will b. reckoned.
ANA set don't answer neigh-anl vet
m krI An Vpn- q ~. | ~ .ca,-i