The morning call., 1892-11-14

AZ organ Agency. W. q. BADGER, 725 Market. &
K oHLER a CHASE 20. % AND 80 oFARRELL
honse largest stock; easy terms; low prices. ap23c
A LOT OF SECONDHAND SQUARE PIANOS:
~ me condition; at q sacrifice KOHLER -
CHASE. % ofarreli st. 1y28 e
I ECKER a. son PIANOS LEADING.
MARSHALL WENDELL pianos
l0-cent sheet music. "IdeaP guitars.
AZ MAUvAis, 769 Market ST. s r. ap22 Il
CHfCKERING SONS, STEIJwAY AND
" other secondhand pianos in fine condition at
bottom prices. r. w. SPENCER 81 CO.. 7Z3 Mar
ket St. History building. second floor. se25u
CLICK CHICK ERING a SONS YOSE AND
- other pianos sold on $40 miscellaneous BENZ.
CURTAZ SON. sole agents. 20 o'Farreli ST. APPS e.
l. l.. NkUMASN PIANOS; FIRST-CLAss IN
{. tone and worsmshship So Ninth ST. mol
III fn tone: strictly first class. GIT Mission suSotf
INVITATIONS TO SMILE.
I've got scheme" said Sellers.
what Is ftp"
why not feed sheep on the cotton plant
and grow shoddy right on the animal Pr
Puck.
Not Far Wrong.
Mrs. Hardup (pausng in her writiDg)-
What is the name for the people who come
after US?
MIR. Hardnp without pausing in his read
ing)-Collectors.-P
The Disease Left Him with Nothing.
Miss Washington--Did de scarlet fevah
ieabe yO' wifi ennything?
Mr.. Johnsing-No. indeed; muffin. Eben
nah henhouse wuz stolen.-Judge.
Postponement May Be Necessary.
II is thought by some that the day of
judgment will have to be postponed in order
TO close up the various and very severe
trials of DIR. Briggs.-Judge.
The Main Object.
Stayatt Holmes-Was your expedition
successful?
Arctic Explorer-Yes; we got back
Iuck.
The Facts in the Case.
Lawyer-Did your husband, madame,
actually take of his coat and give it 10 the
burglar?
Winess-No. sir; had to take it off N.Y.
self.-Judge.
No Use for Signature.
"But can WRITE" protested the voter.
Il don't care rar." said the new ballot.
You just make your maIk."-Brooklyn
Eagle.
Good Idea.
'l'm going to have that last painting of
mine framed" said young naub, the artist.
Don't you think it would be a good idea to
have a glass put over it2''
Yes" replied StrinGer. "a smoked
one. '-Pittsburg Dispatch.
Consent.
II would ask You to be NINE
Would you say yes no ."
"Neither," she said. and hung her head.
How cou she treat love so'
Z" Then you don't love me. do you. dearf"
He ask ed the pretty MISS
She shook or head FIRST up then down.
And gave 20 him 4 kiss.
Then darling, when you neither said,
Pray, tell me " h you meant %
She said. 'My dear, ia silent be-
And silence gives consent"
-Pnsbury Dispatch.
The Chance or His Life.
Mr.. Henpeek--My life Is miserable.
Friend-Whst is the matter?
Mr. Henpeck-Ob. my wife is ALWAYS
haring up at something and now she is
jealous OF my typewriter.
Friend-Jealous of your typewriter ?
GOOD! his IS the chance of your life.
Mr.. Henpeck-How?
Frtend-Discharge your typewriter aud
let your wife take her place and then Won
will be able TO do something you've never
done before in your life.
Mr.. Henpeek-What Is thatp
Frlend-Dictate to your wife.-New York
Press.
Wise Resolve.
Barrows-These railway accidents are
becoming too numer rus. j shall travel
hereafter on a bicycle.
Mrs. BsrrOws-But accidents are inst as
common with bicycles.
ws-True: but there are never so
many people killed. There's only one vic
tim In each case.-Harper's Bazaar.
f.u 4,
In days gone by the business man used
to take his pen in his hand" began Spuonrr.
And nowadays he takes his typewriter
In his arms" added Skidmore.-Brookiyn
Life.
Actions Speak Louder Than Words.
Singleton-W omen must often feel like
swearing, but they don't care to do it,
Doubeday-They don't, Ell? Ii scolding
the servants and spanking the baby TO re-
lieve ones feelings isn't form Of pro-
family I'd like TO know what il is.-PucS.
A Thestrical Item.
Johnnie Vanchump attempts to shove a
billet doux in the hand of Miss Highkicker.
but she refuses, saying: There is only
one man Ia the world from whom / receive
letters"
sand who Is that most fortunate OF
men?" asks Johnnie.
"Ihe lester-carrier." Texas Siftings.
Putting HIS Foot In 1t.
Miss Clara observation-disclosures, this Is
Mr.. Tutter. He was under the Impression
that l was the only daughter. and l have
just been telling him that / have two sis
tiers.
Mrs. Winterbloom-Oh, yes. You must
meet Maude and Estelie, air. Tutter. They
are both of them Older than Clara here.
Young Tutter (wishing TO say the right
thing)--I didn't suppose it possible. Mis-.
Winterbioom. that you couid have any
daughters older than Miss Clara.
Cranberry-PickiBg Machine.
Many of the cranberry pickers on Cape
Cod use machine" which consists of a
small hox-lke arrangement that straps on
to the wrist. At the end are long slender
steel nails like teeth. which shut together
by movement of the hands. and the berri. :
are thus stripped off the vines in much less
time than can be done by hand work.
Many growers have claimed that this in
jures the vines. and some have not allowed
the use of them ON their hlgs But the