The Forest Republican. [volume] (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, 1892-01-20
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

Marriage is often mirage. -Sifinbs.
The tramr's motto-All roads lead to
roam.-LO1oeU Courier.
Yesterday is waste basket into whio
Time dumps lost opportunities.
In the game of life the opera composer
makes the most scores.-Chicago Times.
Despite the oysters phlegmatic tenn.
perament he often gets into stews. Bad
timore American.
"We must have au organ to support
u.s." rs the man said to his monkey
Baltimore Americaa.
Never hire a person that wants to
know why you want something dond.-
Ml,odukee Journal.
A Texas COW kicked a mule to dealt
1t must have been a mule without ar
hind legs.-BoSton Ne'os. "
Men are most likely to rave about a
woman's hair when it is found in the
butter.-7eras SUtings.
There is no need of dull times
board ship. The crew can always ge.
a oom.-LOioeH Courier.
"Plant Canuibals" is headline in the
Dispatch. All right. Plant 'em ten feet
deer. Pttsburg Chronicle. y
The latest wrinkle is a source of sati
faction to young people, but to the
is otherwise. - GalOest0R Ne'oS.
Asking questions Of public speak'
is a good deal like standing on trat
4 tapnv,,nfi,fn nm
Five things are essential to success in
life. One is a good wife; the four
Others are mouey.-RicRmoRd Recorder.
Justice is blind, but not so much so
as the man who goes to law with the idea
that he is sure to get justice. e.-Iera'
iSiftings.
Every man who does not labor and lay
I'D fortune may cause absolute suffer-
ing to his daughters future husband
Elmira Gazette.
The acrobat's lot is an unfortunate
one, for no matter how much he makes
he is continually subject to reverses.--
Baltimore american.
1t seems strange that, when our army
officer has gown old and tired in the
service, the Government should retire
Boston Ne,0s.
DIR. Hammond says we have two
brains. This accounts for the fact that
some men think twice before they act
once.-R0c ester Post.
Editors Wife-"Why do you throw
the contribution into the fret" Editor
-"Because there is no fire IN the contri
button. "-Ne,O York Press.
Ethel-"George said last night that
there wasn't girl in town with a com
plexion like mine" Maud - "ThC
mean thing. Brooklyn Life.
"Straugest girl ever met" mut.ered
Chappie almost to himself. "Wi'y2"
asked Cholly. accepted me, rems ed
Chappie absently. York HeraA,
The greatest surgical operation is
said to be Lansing, Michigan, and tho
greatest feat of strength that of Wheel
ing, West Virginia. Philadelphia ResT
Ord.
"Are you still engasel2" asked the
old friend, who had not seen the dear
RlIl lOI some tune. ''OI, Yes, suO
answered; "but it's to another man. -
Hdrper's BasIr.
$50 you gave your sister a beautiful
birthday present, did you, Tommy7'1
"Yes'm; always give Susie a present on
her birthday, cause mine comes a weak
after hers. ~ Yankee BLADE, N
Some Of Tennyson's early poetry was
written with ink that has since faded en-
tirely from the original manuscript.
These may now be classed as his first
blank verse.-Phaadeiphia Leayer.
"You seemed TO be holding long
talk with Timmins this afternoon. What
was the burden of your conversation2" ~
don't remember now. know it was
burden, though. ."-LadiaAapoiis Journal.
Thiggs-'It you had about $1,000
coo what would you do with itl" Fis-
ties should build the finest, hand
soonest, best furnished, most elegant,
magnificent aud yet homelike residence
in Chicago" "Then whatP' ''Then
rd-rd travel. ~ Chicago Tribune.
Onq-hnlf of tho nponla ara gnnno.sal a.