davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09
NE ONLY WANTED A SLAB.
The Peculiarly Depressing Effect Flat
Hunting Has ON n Man.

The Peculiarly Depressing Effect Flat
Hunting Has ON u Man.
Il beg your pardon, said cadaver-
ous and detected looking man as he
stopped me on Twenty-third street. ''can
you direct me TO the morguey
ITO the morguey" said |. "why. yes"
and gave him the needful directions to
find his way TO that hotel where quiet
people go. but sometimes make more
trouble than noisy ones could do. Look
ing for a friend?'' | asked. the journal
istic sense coming to the front.
mo" said he wearily. Looking for
peace, that is all"
Indeed
yes be replied, and the weight Of
grievous woe rested, it was evident, upon
his soul MY wife Is in the country"
he said. "A week or two ago she wrote
me that as the public schools were about
10 begin soon we must get settled for the
winter. and she wished that ! would
look up pleasant fat for the winter.
The rooms must be light and the neigh
borhood good. and the rent not more
than $50 per week. OF course she ex-
pected TO have steam heat She was not
dead set ON hall boy, but had no OBJ
lection to one. She utterly tabooed
/ Harlem. would not of course think Of
living on street that was made noisy
and sooty by the elevated roads. Other
wise she was ready TO leave the selection
to me, and she wanted me to exercise
my own Judgment largely in the picking
out Of our winter home. p. Sit ought
to be handy To good school. and | must
be sure to see that malarious influences
did not exist either in the fat OF in th'
neighborhood. p. p. Sit would b'
we'll 10 make inquiries regarding TIN
cheapness and excellence of the neigh
boring markets Not that it made an,
difference 10 her what she ate, bu
was such glutton. and | could no
work the market as IL ! were a million
aire
Il accepted this easy commission with
out tremor," said the cadaveous ma
wearily. Il knew that the town wa
full of beautiful flats, with all the con
veniences and blessings that the heart Q
man could desire. | gathered list q
glorious apartments, All Wlthln nsc lnii
utes' walk Of heaven apparently, an
with my wife's directions in my hat b
gan my quest"
"And did You succeedT' asked, breatl
less with interest.
| Succeed he answered dreamil.
, Succeed? Yes, have succeeded.
, have been five weeks upon the ques
) and | have succeeded. Where is II
/ morgue? do not want "A fiat-l want
| slab. A dark, malarious slab, mil
} from any schoolhouse. without janit'
Z or hall boy, with all the electric bel
! out of order, and with every tenant lii
' me, lying down to peaceful dreams"
y Poor man." said |, 81 pity you, b
s do not blame you. For Yes, mu
confess It'll have been there myself" /"
;, New York Herald.
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

Simple words are best. though very
busy man cannot always stop to pick
one.
At a hotel waiter came out or the
coffee room and informed the manager
that man was raising disturbance be-
cause he could not have his accustomed
seat at the table.
"Go in again, said the manager. and
propitiate him IN some way.
Back went the waiter and said, III
you don't like the way things is done
here you can get ont, or I'll propirAts
you pretty quick. s-Lloyd's Weekly.
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09
Number of s,l,chs. In . shirt.

The following singular calculation OF the
number Of stitches Ia plain shirt has been
made by leicester seamstress: Stitches In
collar, four rows, 5000; cross ends OF same,
500; buttonhole and sewing ON button. l50
gathering neck and sewing on collar, l,2oi
stitching the wristbands, | ,2ss, endsof wrist
bands, Is; buttonholes in wristbands, lfs
hemming slits, 354; gathering sleeves, SD
setting ON wristbands, LAOS; stitching on
shoulder straps, $50; hemming the bosom
BIC; sewing In sleeves and making gussets
8 $50; sewing up side ssaiils Of sleeves, :, ,55I
eording bosom, / .l0i; tapping tbs sleeves
| .526; sewing all other SEAMS and setting st,i'
gussets. .272: total number of stitches, 70,
6ap St Louis Republic.
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

The knack Of looking at the bright
side Of things was never developed to
such perfection as in the case Of a south
erner who. after a railroad accident, tai
egraphed 10 friends wife: Your hus-
band killed in railroad accident; head,
both arms and both legs cnt Off. But
later this correction WAS received: First
report exaggerated; your husband killed;
head and legs cut off. but only one arm.
Rams Horn.
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09
THE LAMBS ARE TURNED TIGERS.
The Meek simsites of Yore Now the Ter
rora of Alabama.


America has produeed 80 many queer re-
hgious sects in addition to those she has
adopted from the Old World that new
one attracts little attention. Its only when
some body Of fanatics establish polygamy as
the Mormons did, or abolish marriage as
the Noyesites did, have all their goods In
common like the Hutterisches Mennonites.
or offer up n human sacrifice as the FIRE
mans OF Massachusetts and the Cobb
ties OF Arkansas did, that any one gets
excited about H. And the Simsites OF
Choctaw county, Ala. have not only done
some "masterfui killing" hut they have
declared war against the United States In
ternal revenue
Bob Sims, their prophet or leader, was
at the beginning only wild fanatic, but
prosecution has turned him into despeF
RADIO. aud now he Is an outlaw and fugi
tive. His proper name Is Robert McMil
Ian. and he was born in North Carolina In
1880 Tie served four years in the Confed-
crate army aud was ten months prisoner
| at Camp Morton, Indiana At the close of
| the war he located In Choctaw county, Ala,
/ developed "a rude eloquence and began TO
| preach a new gospel. gaining In the course
/ OF time a hundred OF more followers.
| At first they were noncombatants, and
| were only laughed at. for II one was slap
ped he obediently turned the other cheek.
A little later they got new light aud pro
cee,ied to resist evil with fearful energy,
The Simses refused TO pay taxes, and thus
came into conflict with the local authori
ties Finally mob drove them out OF ths
county, but they soon returned and lived
few years Ia comparative peace. Bol
then began to manufacture "moonshln'
whisky aud the federal marshals go
after him This eliminated in big fight
Deputy Marshal w u, Stribling had AT
rested Bob Sims and destroyed his still
and had him in custody at Bladon Springs
That night Neil and Jim Sims. brother
of the outlaw. and Bailey. his son, will
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

The last shot in the war with England was
fred by the United States vessel Peacock, un-
der Capt Warrington, who captured the
British vessel Nautilus In the Straits OF Sun
da- The next day the American commander
heard Of the conclusion OF peace and gave up
the prize In the three years OF the war ,doO
merchant vessels belonging 70 Great Britain
were taken. The American government ex-
banded sisO, 600 900 In tho war Of lei2
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

There In president IN one Of our
Maine colleges, bright. smart man.
who made rather peculiar statement in
conversation some time ago. Hs wa@
talking about his inability to quote cor
rectly, and said that. while he had an
excellent memory for ideas. sentences
and phrases would easily slip by him.
"why, do not know that ! could re-
peat the Lords prayer word for word, !"
he asserted No one would suspect such
an admission from the worthy president
70 observe him in the pulpit. Lewiston
Journal
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09
SWEET MEMORIES.

Amid the silver glaciers light
Var DIP the mountains frozen heighA
The Alpine flowers bud and bloom
within their dreary Ice bound home;
Like gems Of pnrest light inlaid
In SOME dark cavern's dismal shade.
Beneath the soft and neecy clouds
That Goat like angels veiled In shroud&s
Athwart the rosy tinted bruws
or peaks that rise In northern SHOWS
These fragile things Of beauty sweet
spring up mid parks and slopes Of sleee.
Even thus within the human heart
Some gentle memories n.'er can part;
Their unknown incense gives relief,
And soothes the bitter storms OF grief;
And still they bloom tho sorrows roll
A Agreen oasis for the soul
-B. ii. In New Orleans Picayuns
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09
cnn., nnmhls WAN coIn..

The full bench Of the justices OF the Bonn
bay high court have pronounced a curious
Judgment In a pitch and toss case. They
decided that coins were not instruments OF
gaming within the meaning Of the gam
bling act. Their lordships held that an
"instrument for gaming means an arti
Gle devised or invented for gambling pnr-
poses. which coin Is not.
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

II found the other day drummer who had
been al the road tbree years and had made
only one sale, he said, as he loaned over ths
cigar case at the Kimhall-
Nobody believed him.
What did he selli' asked a listener.
Suspension bridges Atlanta ConEtitu-
tiOn
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

An admirable arrangement looking 20 tho
quick and safe emptylng of the house hax
been adopted at the fremont theatre, In Boz
ton. At any time, BY simply touching hut
ton in any one OF the eight handy places In
different parts Of the theatre, seventeen ssfs
OF folding doors, leAtling 10 A. many sxlss,
apparatus
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

Whoever would do good in the world
ought not TO deal in censurc. We ought
not TO destroy, but rather to construct.
Goethe.
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

There are glaciers in the Himalayas
which are from thirty to sixty miles In
length, and there Is one thirty
miles long which Is aanked on either
Eide by two giant peaks over $1,000 feet
high
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09

Fashions at Vienna are now under CON
troll OF the chief OF police, who has forbid
den women TO wear long skirted dresses on
the street The trains raise dust, spread
eontagion and are always getting steppea
nm
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09
LIFE In A H0USEB0AT.
NEArNEss AND COMFORT IN FLOAT
ING HOMES IN THE WEST.

Pen Plctures of Native. of the Upper
Mississippi who spend Their Nights
ON the water-Th-y Pay Neither Rent
Nor TAKE. aud Have No Coal Biiis.
Down by the waters edge and upon
the broad bosom OF the great Father Of
Waters are moored number Of small
boats, which are literally floating homes,
and invite no small amount of curiosity.
This new Venice is located near the
east end Of Robert street bridge, and is
popularity set down - tough village.
Standing upon the bridge. 70 or 100
feet above the water and fats, and look
ing down upon these unique homes, you
see desolate stretch Of shore line broken
by rock piles, decaying skiffs. irregular
stacks of bark and driftwood. fragments
of tin roofing rotten seines, broken bar
rels in all stages of hoopless disintegra-
ton. and all the other hotsam and jet
sam incident to the beach OF waterway
with tides or varying volume OF water.
In the foreground. and surrounded by
this abomination of desolation. are
moored the string of boat homes.
All are small. but some are larger
than others From the altitude of the
bridge they look like chicken coops, OF
the residences of ultra-fashionable swine
Descending from Robert street to tbs
flats by means Of long flight of steps
the first boat approached is small un
painted affair. stranded upon stony striI
Of real estate temporarily loaned by th'
river The windows are curtainless an,
dirty. no smoke curls upward from th'
stovepipe on the roof, and you conclud'
that il is untenanted There is win
dow in the door, and "A climb to the deci
lays bare bachelors home. confesse'
in the comfortless interior
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09
NEAT INTERIORS.

The rooms Of this boat are all neatly
papered with n small patterned light
paper and bright border of good width.
The floors of the sitting room and bed
room are covered with pretty square
patterned oilcloth which looks not un-
like tiling. and over this is spread
strip OF bright. new ingram carpet for a
rug In tine sitting room stands a hand
some hardwood swinging crib. finished
TO resemble antique oak, and the work
of the turner next door, who Is second
cousin to the month old owner of the
crib. Nottingham curtains as white as
the bed coverings are up at the win
dows and looped back with bows OF rib
bon
4 A rustic stand and flower bowl, rs ar
tistic as many which adorn Summit ave-
nue. lawns, holds healthy species OF
palm. and rustic baskets filed with deli
cate vines fill the windows and lend an
air Of refinement to the room, which Is
strangely incongruous because of that
picture of outer denominations that Is
imprinted upon the retina of your eyes.
In the fourth boat lives young
Noupic WIo AAG JNSA pNNAAhahH aAS-
They are Danes. and have only lived ON
the river for one year.
Their boat also contains three rooms,
but owing 10 limited resources they
were unable to fit them up as nicely as
might be desired. but the same scrnpu-
Ions neatness was over everything The
owner is building another boat, which
is 10 be forty feet long and have -four
rooms when completed. A boat of this
size. IL built by himself, viii cost the
owner in the neighborhood Of 800. The
boat now occupied by this couple was
built by the man at odd times at cos
of $50.
This man, who is the janitor OF 1
Seventh street building, has lined this
walls and ceilings with thick paper, ant
the house is snug in the coldest weather
The small hold in the bottom of thu
boat has more or less water IN it, and IL
summer it makes a very good mill
house, while in winter they can keep
supply of meat on the ice without an,
trouble, and save money by buying Ii
large quantities. St Paul Pioneer Press
Elmore bulletin. [volume] (Rocky Bar, Idaho) 1889-1906, 1892-04-09
A THRIFTY coUPIR.

The next boat was quite elegant in
comparison II was about thirty feet
long. painted dark lavender. and had
latticed porch or veranda, without
roof. extending around three sides A
shallow flight Of steps led from the
ground TO this porch on the deck. and
pretty rustic flower pots and hanging
baskets adorned the steps and hung from
the lattice work On the back porch a
line full of baby garments auttered in
the breeze. and big black dog snooz-
ing in the sun kept guard over all The
owners Of this boat are Danes or Nor
wegians
The husband is turner. and many or
namental pieces Of his handiwork can
be seen about the boat. His wages are
$3.50 per day, and with no rent. taxes
or assessments. street sprinkling or water
tax to pay. and with an industrious, eco
nomical and tidy little wife, this young
man is much better fixed for saving
money and enjoying life than one-half
Of the men who get double his salary,
Following along the path the third
boat IL reached, and the young couple
who live here are cousins of the turner's
! family. Such perfection of neatness in
|. every detail Of the small household II
has probably never been your good fort
|. une TO see outside Of New England
1 home. The kitchen floor was as whit
. as soap and honest scrubbing coul'
: make it. the round breakfast table wa
4 covered by bright Turkey red table
|. cloth; the small cook stove shone like
mirror, and every cooking utensil i
: sight was bright as new dollar.
. The second room was bedchamber
!. and the same neatness was manifest i
: the whiteness Of the spreads and pillo'
= shams. the worked splasher and shinin
? toilet set. Not a speck nor spot an,
! where. II you are astonshed into n
!, marking upon this high state Of cleanl
, ness the housewife. who cannot spea
!, English readily, will point with smil
10 TO the oceans of soft water just outsid
: : the window. and the explanation is com
:. plete. although You leave that hous
with your respect for the Scandinavia
. A
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-04-21

holding II IN ms nano.
"Td rather not guess" replied Dan
coolly. ''Tl just wait and see."
ooh, I'm not going to let you get
away" remarked Bud; land as youseem
to be ignorant of my intentions I'll just
tell you that I'm going to give you good
horsewhipping with this whip!"
AS he spoke he suddenly leaned for
ward and aimed blow with the whip at
Dams face But Dan had anticipated
his action and threw himself forward
upon the neck of his horse just in time
to escape the lash as it cut the air above
him. Quick as flash he threw himself
from the saddle and advanced toward
his antagonist.
As he did so young Ropes struck at
him again. Dan threw up his hand to
ward off the blow just as thelash struck
and wound about his arm. Quick as a
thought Dan grasped the whip, and be-
fore his antagonist could regain his bal
ance he was jerked from the saddle.
As he fell Dan struck him blow in
the face, for he was now thoroughly en-
ragged at the attack that had been made
upon him. Then throwing himself for
ward he grasped the fallen youth and
jammed his head violently against the
ground.
But at that instant Bud drew a pistol
from his belt and pressed it against his
antagonists breast, but with quick
movement Dan struck the pistol aside
AS he did so there was loud report,
and Bud Ropes threw out his hands;
then lay limp and lifeless, a red stream
running across his pallid face.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-04-21
Pears
Soap

People have no idea how
crude and cruel soap can be.
1t takes off dirt. So far,
so good; but what else does
it do?
1t cuts the skin and frets
the under-skin makes red
ness and roughness and
leads to worse. Not soap,
but the alkali in it.
Pears Soap has no free,
alkali in it. 1t neither red
dens nor roughens the skin.
1t responds to water in
stantly; washes and rinses
off in a twinkling; is as
gentle as strong; and the
after-effect is every way
good.
All sorts of stores sell it,
especially druggists; all sorts
of people use it.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-04-21
STATE NEWS.

Laredo subscribes for car load Of
provisions for the relief of those
around Rio Grande city.
Powell, Dallas News agent at
Texarkana, is having trouble, gets
in to in to fight and IL whipped.
NJ ayor Paddock of Fort Worth sus-
ponds the recorder for drunkenness,
until council can investigate.
Exposition hall and other buildings
blow n down at Bonham.
Terrell lie invited to speak at San
Angelo for the administration, to the
delight of the Hogg men.
About 10000 head of cattle are
shipped from San Angelo to the
territory every week.
Gus Krohn, brakeman, cut to pieces
near BRENNAN, fell between cars.
Georgetown fireman have arranged
for big time today.
Hogg opens his campaign at Wills
Point tomorrow.
Yoskum Times is talking . daily
edition.
Rockport has q 16 foot sawfish on
exhibition for the benefit of the edi-
torial excursion.
Contract for building Bee county
Jail let; price SIG, $50.
b. S. Baxter, one of Beeville's old
and respected citizens, is dead OF
pneumonia
Hays county neditates a full third
party, county ticket.
brotherhood of Locomotive Engin-
.sers will meet at New Braupfels May
40 and picnic in Landa park.
An irregular Cyclone seems run
ming around Upshur county, and roots
and fences suffer; q few houses blown
down but no deaths.
Sherman is held by q mob who
threaten to lynch rapist Massey,
whose case has just been continued.
Disastrous cyclone visits the neigh
borhood of Longview and several
buildings demolished. One death re.
ported.
George Clark receives a perfect ova.
ton at Dallas.
Galveston organizes for Clark and
will carry the war into every precinct
with strong club.
Fort Worth Gazette is out with its
dark. horse candidate, Lanham, for
governor.
Old live democrats organize Guada
lupe county club at Seguin.
Loot is appointed postmaster at Ma.
rion, Guadalupe county, and Pesch
at Pesch, Washington county.
E. Kaufman, postmaster and mer-
chant at Riesel, shot by colored burg
lars.
Railroad commission invitation tc
fruit and vegetable men to state theil
grievances develops the fact tina,
these men want the commission tC
keep hands off.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-04-21
THE PURsUIT-sELF EXILED.

A cry of horror escaped Dan Riggsby's
lips as he saw the blood running from
the wound in Bud Ropes head, and for
a moment he stood there helpless and
stupefed at the sight before him.
HE is killedr' he gasped in choking
voice, land shall be accused of his
murder"
A cold perspiration broke out on his
brow, and groan escaped him as he
thought of his parents at home. What
would they think of the deed and what
great calamity would it bring upon them
as well as upon HIMSELF
At that instant he heard shouts in the
distance, and lifting his eyes he beheld
Ben Ropes riding furiously toward him,
followed by half dozen cowboys. He
saw the CLEAN of pistols in their hands
and knew they had witnessed the en-
counter between himself and Bud, and
would visit speedy vengeance upon him.
He well knew the impulsive and des-
perate character of those with whom he
now had to deal, and he realized that he
was in most dangerous and desperate
situation. That the men who were ap-
preaching would shoot him down with
out giving him the slightest opportunity
to explain the situation of affairs he
was fully convinced, and he recognized
the fact that his only chance of life lay
in instant flight.
AS this thought occurred to him he
turned quickly to where he had left his
horse, but the animal had taken fright
and was galloping wildly across the
prairie hundred yards away, followed
by the horse that had been ridden by
Bud Ropes.
Dan realized the utter impossibility of
overtaking his retreating horse, and
without moments hesitation he turned
and ran toward the timber that skirted
the creek hundred yards away His
gun had been carried away upon the
horse and he was without the slightest
weapon to defend himself.
Reaching the cover of the brush, Dan
cast quick glance behind him and saw
the horsemen refining in their horses at
the spot where Bud Ropes lay. Some of
them hastily dismounted while three
others spurred their horses in pursuit of
the fleeing youth.
Dan crept through dense thicket of
dogwood and green briars and sped
swiftly through heavy growth of paw
paws that skirted the stream. He knew
that the horsemen could not urge their
horses through the thicket without con-
siderable loss of time, and he resolved to
use every moment in putting distance
between himself and his pursuers.
For quarter of mile he ran with all
the speed he could muster. and then,
with sinking heart he made the dis
covery that the woods were growing
more open, offering him but little chance
of concealing himself
With this discovery came the sound of
rapidly advancing hoofs behind him,
and he knew that his pursuers would
soon be upon him. twas useless for
him to attempt to escape by continuing
his course up the creek, and he glanced
rapidly about him for the purpose of
discovering some place of concealment
There was no available thicket near at
hand, but happening to glance toward
the creek he saw a mass Of driftwood
To Be Con tinued.