The record-union., 1892-08-17
The Original "BackwOods Belle"
Heard From Again.
Gems From the Pen of Breezy Corre-
spondent-sitting Up With Corpse
-ssThe Men Do Not Do 1t That
way''-The s'CuIlud Gemmen, and
the cabIs.kyah."
the Cabs" Kyah."

heard Of the uninyiting portion OF your
State that holds the town of Needles on
its breast. Some rare stories come float
ing up occasionally from the sagebrushy,
sand-peppered, coyote garnished wastes,
Of which the following is sample good
and true:
1t lay calm and perfectly still upon the
bed, after the manner of all well-bred
corpses. The white sheets were drawn
carefully above and around the silent
figure. The cold clay was all that was
left of a warm, jolly friend. Room No. 10
knew but one inmate now-Richard
Requa, and he was dead. Tom Harding,
the big-hearted, impulsive, boyish man,
off for fortnight's vacation, knew moth
ing of his room mates demise, and was
fastening homeward, his pockets filed
with choice cigars for Dick (tor Tom don't
smoke), his stomach filled with bad
whisky for Tom does drink and his
head full of very fishy stories (for Tom is
only NAM.
A dim, feeble light is burning in No.
IS, and the watchers, who have grown
weary IN attendance upon the silent
figure, have descended TO the dining
room for refreshments. The train from
the north has just pulled in, depositing a
gers, and steamed away again with the
remainder of human freight. Bad
whisky has the whip in hand over one of
the arrivals (our Tom and realizing il he
hurries to his room to sleep it off, after
talking an arm of of Dick. The meager
light had been turned low by thoughtful
DICK, he thinks, to await his home COM
ing, and Dick is sound asleep with his
head covered up. at isn't healthy for
him to sleep so, shut out from fresh air, !"
Tom sollloquizes, consequently gives the
sheet vigorous yank off of his COM
rade's face and pulls his nose. Heis very
white, unusually so, Tom thinks, for
Dick belongs to the grimy class of engi-
neers. 1t is crying shame to awaken
him from such a sound sleep, SO Tom
quickly disrobes and stretches himself
alongside OF Dick, after bracing his back
against his communicative bed fellow,
thereby securing to himself his side of
the bed in which to stretch.
All Is quiet now-Tom is just dropping
into heavy doZe, superinduced by the
liberal draughts of tangle-foot, when the
watchers, pair of lovers, enter There
IS stiffness for few minutes, when few
low, lmpassioned sentences precede half
dozen resounding kisses. Tom is wide
awake now. and always alive to the ridic-
ulous side of human nature, digs an elbow
into quiet Dicks ribs, to awaken him to
his surroundings. Tom thinks it is the
newly married pair who tenant No. Is,
and, becoming tired of eavesdropping
and succumbing to the bad whisky i'm
bibed along the route home, sleeps
soundly and well.
kissing the object of ones affection is
vastly more pleasing than bathing the
face of a corpse, and the lovers small
marvel) executed the former with such
commendable diligence as to utterly ex-
clude for the time being the latter
They recall Themselves noun
preaching the bedside reverently turn
down the sheet and adjust the towel
wrung from ice water, upon sleeping
Toms face. With yell that would have
brought whole band OF Apache warriors
to the scalping knife he springs to his feet
and bounds away, out into the night, out
TO the Businesses of the mesa where the
surprised coyote, from his lair in the
warm sand, among the prickly cacti,
SIouches farther into the desert, stealing
hurried glances over his shoulder blade
al the flying phantom.
Draw the curtain charitably upon the
last act. for day is breaking and
Toms neither garments are at the hotel,
in room 10, where lies the dead comrade.
and on the floor near by the young lady.
IN the arms of deaths twin brother-a
swoon.
1t happened on a cara San. Francisco
cable car. They sat directly in front OF
an elderly lady and a gentleman. They
were logged out in the latest-manish to
the death. Short hair, starchy shirt front,
four-in-hand, diamond stud, iauntv
jacket, with hands well poked in the
pockets, backs as straight as the path to
heaven, and a t-you-rather-lik Ike me
air. One wore suspenders neatly but
toned at the waist, just too horsey for
anything. The gallussed one arose to
leave the car, and as she passed on the old
1.arlx n
discretion.
'Well, 1 swan! Our girls can't be
girls any more. 1t has come to a pretty
pass"
Yes, they try to do everything the
men do" quietly assented the gentleman.
The fire flew from the eyes Of the maid
of the starchy front. 1t was like unto a
match thrown into firecracker foundry.
Like Maud Muller, she twas lett i'll the
field alone" but she held it down. "Y es,
and they do things just as we'll as the
men do, too" came the scorching reply.
The man was silent, silent as the grave
"a whole churchyard full of 'em. A
short distance on the victor left the car
She did not display her ignorance and
pull the wrong strap, not she; neither did
she waste time gesticulating to the ticket
butcher. She swung herself Oft as the
car was speeding along at a well-oiled
gait. But the gender of the act and that
lit on the cobbles with dull heavy
thud, with variations. The air was full
of wearing apparel an instant, and when
she was picking up the fragments, a few
basketsful and more, there came floating
back from her enemy, the man, as he
slid into distance, But the men don't do
ii that way!"
Speaking of cables, recalls an incident
worthy of mention which comes from
one of the wheat-growing counties, in
its largest village. On the main street a
sign hung forth-one of those blue and
white oval signs-which reads: Postal
Telegraph Commercial Cable" An old
''cullud gemman" stoodEgazing at it with
rapt attention. His days work was done.
The whitewash clung TO his ragged garh
with the adheSiveness of the brother OF
holy writ. His face would make a good,
respectable ace of spades pale as Cleo
patra's rivals,
Like stars beside the sun
"Can't you read it, Uncle Tom ?" asked
the fly Young operator from within.
'.Yis, chile, l kin spell it eout, but l
can't pernounce it."
The t. V. o. flew TO the rescue and pro-
nounced it with flourish. The old man
tarried. He leaned in at the door and
looked around mysteriously. We'll. hev
they got one of 'em heah?''
Yes said the knight OF the wire.
''Wheah?''
fright here behind this counter,
The old mig leaned further in. gazed
around carefully and said: 'sWell. now.
how fas' kin them things akshully 90?
0nct / wuz on what you call canle
6yah, ans / wanted to git ollen it afore il
stopped at de end Of de road, so / lis
jumped, an TO Cord, it nigh onto killed
me-" 4. R. l..
York, Pa. August IL, 1892.
"a Historical Tree in Transit