The Abbeville press and banner. [volume] (Abbeville, S.C.) 1869-1924, 1892-02-24
.PITH AND POINT.

New 1ork Joulnat. q. +
Running expenses are those which You
pay as you go.-Augusta Chronicle.
If man once poses as wide,awaks
| citizen he must not repose. Boston
Post.
| A big enterprise on foot-A man start
ing to walk around the woIld.- Boston
Journal. ~ ~: !. !.
! It is not very serious matter to quar-
rel with an actress. She never refuses to
SNAKE Boston Post. 5s.
There are too many people in the
world who use their nest.eggs to make
cake of.-Atchison Globe. . S
.tThere are times when he is very
gloomy 81 don't wonder; he calls
himself self.made man. New York
Press. M
| A Western lecturer has selected for,
his subject ga Bad Egg. This subject
often strikes a. lecturer unfavorably .----s
Texas siftings.
Rosaline-"How is your new beauf"
Grace-s'Oh, ne promises well. Rosa-
lie (warningly)-"Get him to write. -
New York Herald. 5ti z !.
| When an unmarried woman says she
has remained single from choice, do not Z
be so rude as to ask her tfrom whose
choiceW-Boston Transcript.
George Eliot says: ssThe man who
trusts q friend educates him." But the
trusts often gets the most experimental
observation-disclosures Post. ~
An anti-crank bill has been intro;
duced into Congress. The farmers boy
will be anxious to know If it includes
the grindstone. Lowell Courier. IS Y
The banana hss great variety Of
uses. 1t is said that -four is now made
from it. It is no secret that the skin
makes low slippers.-Lowell Courier.
Querist-"Why did you borrow that
sfye' of Smith, the restaurateura
Audace-"To give a little lunch at the
Ettie Cafe" Kate Fields Washington.
After much solicitation the German
Government has decided not to send the
Watch on the Rhine to the Worlds CO.
lumbian Observation-Disclosures Circu-
lar. Z
A woman can give much more advive.
about how to keep a husbands love on
the first anniversary of her marriage than
she can at her silver wedding. .-Elmira
Gazette. s .
He (fshing for compliment )-"An5
handsome men are conceited, you know
she-..But it does not follow that all
conceited men are handsome. Boston
Transcript.
Lady engaging servant) -tsYou seem
to possess every necessary quallhcatlon.
Have you sweetheart" Servant,
"No mum; but can soon get one.'"'----. :.
The Comic.
He-"Well, how is Mr.. Jones getting
on since his acciient2" She-"They
say he doesn't seem like himself" He
-"Well, that must be comfort to bus
wife. Boston Beacon.
Mistress-"Fanchette, why don't you
sweep with the new broom2" Fanchette
-"Rut, madame, the room was so dirty
Thought I'd use the old one little yet
and save the new one."-Comic.
Young Mrs. Firts-''You do not tire
of my singing, do you, dear2" MIR. Fits
tho, love; your voice reminds mo SO
much of that girl was engaged to along
in 1885," And she hasn't sang anything
siuce.-Indianapoli Journal.
"Why, how is thisa You, your wife,
and all of the family have got your faces
bandaged2 Are you all afflicted with
the toothache9" s'You see, our oldest'is
learning to be dentist and so he is
drawing our teeth for bit of practice"
-Dorfbarbier. 49,.
Tommy's Mamma (as Tommy suddenly
burst, out crying-"What is the mat
teri" Tommy--'I hurt myself this
afternoon" Tommy's Mamma-"Why
didn't you cry then instead Of now"
Tommy" Cause Twas busy. was
playin' with Freddy hen."-Comic.
Bul6nch-s'Miss Smilax has wonder
full memory" Wooden-''Why, what
proof has she given of ita' Bul6nch-
.sWhy, met her at supper last night
and she not only reminded me about our
being engaged last summer, but gave me
q number Of the details. boston Cour-
ter. ....
Jack Hardup with unwonted enthusi-
asm)-"By Jove! see that some fellow
is talking about introducing bill into
the house making it misdemcanor to
send annoying letters to any one. Very
clever idea that. I'll have my tailor
locked up for six months, by Jove"-
Tit-Bits.
A famous railway president, while out
for q constitutional few weeks since,
noticed son of toll digging ditch.
"Pretty hard work'' suggested the rail-
way magnate. The laborer put down his
pick and shovel and replied, with delib-
Grafton: "Wefl, it aint't lawn tinnus."
--Harper's Drawer.
Philistine Wife-"Your paper isn't at
all amusing just now. But there, must
confess it is not-easy to be either funny
or witty every week." Journalist (much
worried)-sNo, my dear, much easier to
be always dull and prosaic every even
Ing." He was about to add personal
illustration, but as, fortunately, he didn't,
The subiect dropped. 1--Punch.