Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1892-08-27

you couldn't do 1t in fifty years, though it's
something for YOU"
"For me?"
THAT'S what said; but you can't see
it till after dinner
Mr.. Bowser, you are awfully kind and
thoughtful! How good of you to surprise
me with a new wrap. Just let me see one
little corner of it,
Not hairbreadthy' shouted Mr.. Bow
ser as he seized her and went waltzing
around the room. ''It isn't a wrap, but
nevertheless 1 hope it will prove pleas
ant surprise. Come on to dinner"
During the meal Mr.. Bowser was so
jolly and laughed so often and so heartily
that the girl looked at Mrs. Bowser in a
puzzled way and evidently desired to warn
her that some grave calamity was about
to happen. When they had finished and
returned to the sitting room Mr. Bowser
picked up the package and said:
Here it is, and hope you'll feel as good
over it as I do. I've been whole week
selecting it, but 1 finally got beauty"
You are SO goodv'
Not at all. It's husbands business to
make life pleasant for his wife. Il I
wasn't SO Internally busy I'd bring in
little surprise of this kind on you every
week or two. Open the box
Tim SO nervous. You open itv'
"Nervous Well, here goes. What do
you think of that?"
And Mr.. Bowser tore off the paper which
concealed handbook, removed the cover
and held up to view bonnet. AS Mrs.
Bowser stared at it without uttering q
word. he said:
"It's a Jim dandy and no mistake! I
went into dozen different places before 1
got suited. Don't she knock the socks
off'n anything you ever had beforee You'd
have gone down and spent ten days and
frtn1 b. be-
were suited, while it took me just seventy
seconds to buy this after 1 saw it. What's
the matter?"
''N-nothingt'
"Then what are you turning all sorts of
colors for? Isn't she a beauty"
"Yes-very nice, butt
Mrs. Bowser, what on earth is the
matter! Here's a black bonnet. beautifully
jetted, trimmed up in the brightest sort of
red, with elegant lavender ties and it cost
me twenty-three dollars. What's wrong
with its"
1T isn't my-my shapen' she stammered.
"Your SHAPED What has your shape got
to do with bonnet! Are you too fat or
too lean?'
II mean the brim is too wide, and 1
couldn't wear those colors with my COM
plexion."
''Your complexionl What has your
dollar bonnet2'
"And those ties! Even colored woman
couldn't wear lavender!"
why, durn my buttons, had the MILL
ner to take off the other ties and put these
on, and paid her q dollar extra to make
the changer'
Mr.. Bowser, you are awfully good and
kind, but l can't wear that bonnet. I
should look like a fright in it. You see,
you'-
II see 1 am an ass, Mrs. Bowser'' he
shouted, as he waved the bonnet on high.
$50 is any other husband who plans a
pleasant surprise for his wifel Here I've
run my COMPOUNDED legs off and paid out
twenty-three big dollars, and you talk
about complexion and lavender and col
ored women,'
please don't be angry, Mr.. Bowser
You see no man can select a bonnet for a
lady. There has got to be harmony be-
tween"-
Harmony, chr She's got to prance
around for two weeks and try on every
thing she sees till she can match her eye
winkers, eyebrows, the bump on her nose
and the pimple on her chin! That's all
right! You go prancev'
IT can probably exchange''-
mo, you can't! This bonnet is not one
Of the exchangeable sort! There she goes
into the alley, and perhaps it will harmo-
nize with the complexion of the ashcan!
When get up another surprise for you
there will be an earthquake under itr'
"Mr. Bowser, if you will only let me ex-
plain. You see''-
"That's all right-all right! She didn't
matchl She didn't harmonic. was an
idiot. Nothing further need be said. You
had better put that bowling young 'un to
sleep, and ii any one calls l can be found