The Pacific commercial advertiser. [volume] (Honolulu, Hawaiian Islands) 1885-1921, 1892-10-13

n CIR6 A1oiDic woman the other
II ~ day, looking up from a
newspaper, "to lay all the
faults OF children to their bringing mn.
Here's a story about young girl who
was impairment to her mother in pub
NC ana IL states that every one who
heard her remarked, Justly. that it
Wasnt her fault-it was her mothers.
VINO had not taught her properly There
Is, too, Spanish proverb, There are no
ungrateful children which of course
means that bad children have had no
training to he grateful for. Now, do
not believe that doctrine. 1t is cowardly
and unjust to lay the ingratitude and
undutifulness of all children to their
parents. The argument leaves no room
for inherited endencies-inherited per-
maps from remote ancestors-nor for the
differentiation which makes every indi-
vidual unlike every other individual. If
training were all, why are not all the
children of one family alike? Perhaps
you will say that parents often indulge
one child more than another; but how is
it that those children who are reared in
asylums and refugees, and subjected to
precisely the same. training, influence
teaching and discipline, turn out to be
just as different from each other as chill
dren reared III different families?"
"You have brought up several chill
dren of your own" asked her listener.
Several of my own, and two or three
which were not mine" replied the lady,
land | know that even the most careful
FOL Ell 49,
children out all alike, like shoepegs or
clothespins. Why, in the very first
family that ever existed, according to
the Bible, one child was good and the
other bad. 1t is quite probable that
they were trained very similarly. They
had no long ancestry to furnish them
with inherited tendencies Was it
training that made Cain murderer, or
want of training?"
''You do not believe, then, that evil
tendencies may be corrected by advice,
precept and teaching?'
sometimes perhaps. But all the
training in the world will not alter a
child's nature. You may perhaps teach
a child of o sullen, willful, obstinate dis
position to keep it somewhat under con-
troll, but you can never make that child
into cheerful, amiable, lovable person.
A tendency to fippancy and self conceit
(the groundwork of this impairment
girls ordering her mother about in pub
lic) it is next to impossible to train out
of a child. Even those qualities which
would seem much more external, like
untidiness and Incidence flor I have
often heard it preached that habits of
order and neatness are simply matters
of teaching and habit are very hard to
eradicate Did | ever tell you about
the child that 1 tried so hard to make
into trim, tidy, frugal, neat and eco
nomical woman!"
''No, and l should much like to hear
how o. woman who has all those quail
ties in so good measure as yourself could
fail to impress them on any child under
her control"
..Well, did fail miserably, and that
experience showed me the injustice OF
laying all faults to training, or the lack
of it. / began with that child before
she was old enough to do the simplest
kind of work-began by insisting on hel
picking up her toys and putting then
in place every night; by having a row
of hooks low enough for her to reach ii
the wardrobe, where she was taught tt
hang her clothes at night and her night
dress in the morning; by teaching hel
to have her small undergarments-hoS'
and so on-laid nicely in her drawer
ready for her wearing. Despite all m!
care. doubt if she ever put toys or gar
nents in place without being special,
reminded.
Gas she grew up she showed an ute
lack of tidiness and order: her clothe
were scattered all about her room, he
schoolbooks were anywhere, whereve
she CHANGED to drop them; she coul'
never find her pencil, scissors or thimble
her handkerchief was never at hand
when she had half dozen pretty whit
aprons for school they were always a
soi1ed Mt once; if she had several cam
l,;c bingham or muslin frocks she wa
s,,re To have no fresh one among ther
unless watched her dressing every day
How hard tried to teach her to be nea
and careful with her clothes, TO sho'
her that she must always have clea
Garments ready for need; that she mus
1l
not wear clothes which needed memo
mo. that she must not pin patch; tha
She must not toss her clothes on chair
and then sit on them and press the1
full of wrinkles; that she must not Us
nins where buttons should be; that sh
,nust keep her room tidy, and that sh
must brush her teeth night and mor1
ing!' ,,o,
Then you think her headlessne'
and untidiness were hereditary
No, l cannot see how that could b
her mother was a good New Englan
housekeeper, careful, neat handed an
orderly, who knew how to do all kln'
of homework and sewing, and did the
we'll But that girl would as soon wei
a dress slit from waist to hem as M
lot least about home; she was va
enough about her appearance In puoiiSS
fla button came off her clothing 81
1ronld min tho fabric all to rags ratn
than replace it, and my life was gu
den of constant watchfulness ana
nroof. had to threaten to orusn Il
teeth myself in order to get her TO 10
and I believe I did it once or swi {,
Now YOU are tempted to say | was y :;
.eDere With her; but 1 assure you 81
eeSei0 WIZ I'D exceOting by belT