The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-08-21
EDITOR BUGa's soaBME.
1t Was Big One, But Men Laughe
at 1t.

at 1t.
Editor Solomon Bugg Of Kansas tells an
interesting story 30 a Chicago Inter Ocean
reporter. He says:
81 thought it all out by myself, and was
ready to receive the plaudits of a thankful
populace, aud spent one entire afternoon
prActiciHg tor pose for my statue in Lin
coin park. But fell down and was in
suited. It was like this:
after had worked out my scheme de-
cided not to say anything to the worlds fair
people about it, but to get prominent rail
road president to take it up aud push it.
wrote out the plan, put 1t In my pocket and
called on the president of the X n. and p
railroad at his office. He wasn't there. 1
went to bis 'palatial residence, as we say in
Kansas, and rang the bell. The maid looked
at me with a startled air OF an alarm clock
that has gone off during the prayer at a
funeral. | was shown into big room
Presently in came the magnate with deep
frown.
"'What can do for you. sire he asked
savagely.
you are anxious said l. to make as
much money off the worlds fair as possible.
l mean your company is, amt itP
WHATS that TO your he jerked out.
{" You recognize said l, calmly, that if
congress does not lend that S., 900, 900 it will
hurt the fair and your businessP
Undoubtedly he snapped, still frown-
"'wen. I've got scheme to set every
thing to rights
"'YouP
"'Yes, sir. 1 will tell it to you quickly. ;
"He sat down in his chair and closed his
eyes, still frOwning.
g Now said to him, the worlds fair
cannot get along without that loan, can itP
No, he said, impatiently.
" Nor the government can't spare S., GOO, :
900. eau itP
"'I suppose not
''Well, tlen, the government must do
something to get more mouey aud yet do it
in a safe way
1.-THE president quit frowning aud was
smiling family. He was smoking cigar,
aud he blew blue stream out of the corner
CT his mouth awhile. and then changed off
and pulled out bis rings.
"'Let the government | continued, lend
a large amount Of money to the states at |
per cent. Money is always in demand and
it would lie taken. Then let the states lend
it to tine counties at per cent, the counties
to the cities at per cent, and the cities TO
the people at per cent There would be a
legitimate profit all along the line and the
people would borrow money at cheaper
TdJb Oh Interest," Uudn buey can get IL now,
and the $4,000, 900 would soon be secured to
the government
"The president was smiling. Then he got
up and came over to me, started all of a
sudden aud said: DO you feel ill 2
AZ didn't and said: Not in the least
" Indeed he said, 4 thought you looked
faint. and was going to offer you little
brandy
Il had fallen down in not agreeing with
~, a.. -
never was when Col Solomon Bugg would
let propriety interfere with brandy, and
lowered my voice and said, with such evil
dent invention that blush to think of it:
4 do feel trifle H.
"He poured me glass Of brandy, which
1 drank.
"'Do you feel any betterP he asked
anxiously.
mot much ; feehly said, thinking Of
more brandy.
"'Wait, he said, nay physician is in the
other room and viii bring him in and he
sailed away with the brandy decanter with
him. He was gone good while and tried
to think what had caused all this row about
my being sick when was perfectly well,
and why the president had never said boob
about my scheme. 1t never occurred to
me that was being guyed.
After awhile heard the doctor and the
uiokuoOO a-ChuChhuA W bEbius6lFbS, DllL
they ceas ed and looked grave as owls when
they entered
"'What is the trouble, my good manP
said the doctor, inspecting me.
81 don't know, doctor, / am sure' and
feigned the accent Of a confirmed in
valid.
"'It looks like brain trouble, he said, as
Stunning graver air than ever.
81 tried TO think if brandy was good for
brain trouble.
Now said the doctor, think of some
thing thought
"'Do you feel any painq
"a little in my head
F'Try again.
-" 1t is a very bad pain, doctor said I,
still looking with Interior designs aud look
ing meaningly at the brandy which the
president still held In his hand.
'The doctor smiled.
The brain is in very bad way he
said, when a harmless little thought such
as you are capable of thinking paius il.
Avoid thinking thoughts with your brain.
Use your mouth
And with that the president grabbed
me on one side and the doctor on the other
and hustling me to the front door dropped
me TO the pavement, and slammed the portals
or that plutocratic home III my face. And
when shambled away. thinking about my
scheme, the brandy and the vicissitudes OF
genius, could hear the doctor and the
president still roaring inside.
Il had been guyed.n