davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26
NO. AZ


A man CANDLES on the future
when be decides between business
and a college education. He gam
bles on the future in the choice OF q
profession or trade. He CANDLES
on the future in his selection of q
wife. He stakes his prosperity and
his comfort, or a part of them, on
every transaction into which his
strife for fortune forces him, or
which opportunity offers him. He
has been taught all his life to risk
every component part of himself,
from his reputation to his umbrella.
Consequently legislative enact
ment which aims to cut him off
from speculation in certain articles
of commerce no more touches his
conscience than it affects his eye-
sight or his digestion or his literary
predictions. 1t only warns him
that he must not follow a certain
form. But it does not persuade him
that he must not invent a new
form Of following it. This is the
plain fact. In the whole history
Of the world no law has ever
changed human nature in the way
the law maker exsected it would.
Grant the evil of gambling to tho
fullest extent. Grant, even, that
the time has come when an anti
option bill must absolutely be
passed. 1t still remains that an
anti.option bill wont prevent gam
bling in grain. 1t may have unfor-
seen effects, but it won't have the
one desired.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26
The Sisters Of Charity.

The following is from a speech of
Captain Crawford:
"on all Gods grccn and beautiful
earth there are no purer. nobIer,
more kind hearted or self-sacrificing
women than those who wear the
sombre garb of Catholic sisters.
During the war 1 had many oppor.
tunities for observing their noble
and heroic work, not only in camp
and hospital, but on the field of
battle, right in the front, where
bullets Missed and shot and shell
flew, and dead and mangIed forms
lay.
81 have seen them moving over
the field, their faces wet with tears,
administering to the wants of the
wounded and whispering words of
comfort into the cars of the dying;
now kneeling to moisten with water
the bIoodIess lips on which the
death angel had left his pale inn
print; now breathing words of hope
of immortality beyond the grave
into the ear of some mangled SOL
dier; now holding the crucifix to
receive the last kiss from some-
body's boy from whose breast the
life-bIood was flowing.
81 am Protestant, but / shall
never forget, or cease to cherish
with profound reverence, the men,
ory of those noble, holy women
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

Suppose you want to tell your au-
dience, '.The hasty man was sorry
for it all the rest of his life. Say
it thus:
The hasty man, the man who was
in the habit of yielding TO his tenn
per, who gave way to the passion of
anger, who was accustomed to let
his wrath run away with him-the
man, in short, who was subject to
fits of rage. and had never learned
to control himself, he regretted this
deed lie repented the act which
was the outcome of passion, lie had
remorse for that which he had done
in the heat of his angry feeling, for
the quick feeling of wrath which
prompted him to bad, rash and
precipitate action, for the wrong
committed in that moment when he
was not himself, but was possessed
by the spirit of evil; because of
this he lamented. In the privacy of
his chamber, in the bosom of his
family oron the street in the public
highway, before the gaze of aIi men,
where all mankind could behold
him, he expressed his regret FOR the
impulsive deed that married his
meditations all the rest of his life,
during the remainder of his mortal
pilgrimage, while he shared thecom-
mon lot of existence here below,
during all the years that he still
tarried on this earthly planet
There you have it, a fair specimen
Of the style of speaking of many
orators in our time. Chop them off.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26
Value Of ssDem Pants. ;,

An amusing incidont happened in
the city other day. A Jew was on
the witness stand testifying against
a negro who had stolen a pair of
pantaIoons from his store.
"How mucharc the pants worth2''
asked the Judge.
"Well, Judge" responded the
witness, "it depends on the man
who wants to buy them. 1 sell
them to one man for Sc, TO another
for 50, but you can have them for
ST."
"Sir," responded his Honor in a
disgusted tone of voice, al want
you to tell me what those pants are
worth"
"Ah, Judge" said the Israelite,
''takc 'em for SO if s4 don't suit
you.
"Look herel'' thundered the
Judge, 'if you don't tell me the ex-
act value of them pants / will send
you tojail for contempt of court"
swell, then, Judge" pleaded the
obtuse witness in a most insinu-
ating tone of voice, "take 'em for
two dollars. 1t is giving them
away almost, but you can have 'em
for two dollars"
By this time the people in the
court-room were convulsed with
laughter, and the Judge himself was
obliged to forget his disgust and
joined heartily in the laugh. he
did not buy the 'pants," however.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26
Nothing Needed Rut Rest.

Many times rest is the only med
icine needed by the sick. Ifa dog
is sick he rolls himself into ball
in a warm corner and eats little or
nothing till he is we'll. Quiet and
warmth are the medicine of the
four-footed philosopher. The biped
loses the instinct of the animal;
fumes, frets, takes stimulants and
medicants, aud gives no chance to
the recuperativie forces of nature.
If he, too, would retire to his CHAM
ber, keep warm and eat next to
nothing, those waste and poisonous
matters which produced the disor-
der would be expelled in due time,
through the organs of secretion.
That machinery which carries on
involuntary motion when the body
is at rest, pushes out of it from two
t. eight pounds of waste material
every twenty-four hours. The
physician of experience says that
with bathing and half fasting tho
system, in ordinary cases, viii take
care of itself.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26
A SinrnInr Horse.

A funny story is told of Dean
Swift, who was a witty man and
fond of a joke at the expense of
other people, as most witty people
are. One very cold night when he
was travelling he stopped at a little
inn. There was only one fire in the
house, and the guests Of the inn
crowding about it left no place for
the newcomer.
With II solemn face Dean Swift
called to the hostler and told him to
get peck of oysters Immediately
and take them out to his horse.
"Will your horse eat oysters, sir2''
asked the astonished man.
4Just take them out ard see,
said the horses master.
The people arond the fire stared
at the man who owned this curious
horse, and nearly every one of them
left his seat and went out 10 see the
remarkable horse eating oysters.
Then the cunning Dean made
himself comfortable in the warmest
corner, and ordered his supper.
Presently back came the hostler
with the disappointed crowd after
him.
Gle won't touch them, sir, cried
the hostIer.
"Then take the foolish animal all
the oats he can eat replied Dean
Swift. "You can bring the oysters
here. I'll cot them for supper
myself"
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26
Babies don't cry for tbs sake q

Babies don't cry for the sake OF
crying, or to make others uncom-
Portable. They know no such thing
as passion, and hence cannot cry
from anger. A baby cannot swear,
scold, pout or venthis displeasure by
boxing some ones ears, kicking the
dog or indulging in any such antics
which so relieve an adults pent up
feelings.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26
cLARKsoN AND HIS AXE.


In the face of this noble prayer
and these noble pledges the Presi
dent turned over the postoffice de-
partment TO the spoilsmen. The
railway mail service was looted in
the first months of the administra-
tion, two thirds of the Presidential
postollices were filled during the
first year, and Clarkson's axe ceas-
ed to fall among the fourth class
postmasters only when there were
no more heads worth decapitating.
Nor did any fidelity and efficiency
or regard for the interests of the
public service save Pearson in New
York, Hendrix in Brooklyn, Corse
in Boston, Collector Saltonstall and
other less conspicuous but equally
faithful servants. The great census
bureau also, contrary to recent
practice, was given over to patron
age, with results that discredited
some of its most important work
Over against these abuses, aggrava-
ted as they were by the transfer of
patronage to local bosses in Now
York and other States, we may give
the administration some credit for
the reforms introduced by Secreta-
ny Tracy in the navy yards.
The administration must also ac-
cept the responsibility for the Nc
Kinley act. for it not only indorsed
and approved the bill as considered
and passed, but has been at great
pains to try to vindicate its opera
ton since it went into effect. That
act has carried the doctrine of pro-
lection to an extreme never before
seriously advocated in this country
1t found the treasury embarrassed
by surplus revenue, and reduced
that revenue by abolishing taxes
that went to the government, and
by readjusting the terms of part
nership in the use of the taxing
power between the government and
private interests SO as to divert a
still larger share of their joint in
come from the former to the lat.
ter. Itplaced the heaviest tax upon
the necessaries of life and the neces-
saries of labor that any self-govern.
ing people ever submitted to, and
in its avowed effort to check com.
merce it aimed foul blow at the
prosperity of tho farmer, by de.
monetizing or debasing through
prohibition and heavy fines the only
currency foreign imports - fol
which he could exchang his surplus
products.
THE RECIPROCITY HUMBUG.
It has been proclaimed by its de.
tenders as the most harmoniou.
system of protection ever enacted
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26
A CoIored Love Letter.

Miss Matilda SNOWFALL, having
closed the door, approached the lady
of the house in most mysterious
manner, and asked as a favor that
her employer write a letter to Sam
Johnsing.
aWhat do you want me to writer
@Write to him dat l was at de
corner at de 'pinted hour, and dat
he didn't come. .
eWell, l have got that down.
@Den add ter dat ar: i consols
myself wild de fond hope you was
KEEP away by sickness. Your only
true lub, Matilday SNOWFALL
1Sras lSiittfings.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

Somehow it comes natural to the
humblest man to say @they'' when
speaking of wicked people, and awe''
when he talks of the faithful and
good.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

You can never know how high a
value man puts upon himself until
he sues railroad company for s5,-
600 damages for the loss Of one fin
ger.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

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The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

Its not enough to possess virtue.
asif it were an art; it should be
practiced.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

A wide spreading. hopeful dispo-
sition is your only true umbrella in
this vale of tears.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

Search out the wisdom Of nature.
her rules are the maxims Of fru-
gaIity.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

There are not many men so good
that they can do right without first
having a struggle.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

II is great deal easier to jump
out ofthe frying pan than it is to
jump ont of the fire.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

Women think so much without
acting Men on the other hand,
act 50 much without thinking.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

Mems years and their faults are
always more than they are willing
to own.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

People who are wrong in their
thinking are snre to be wrong in
their walking and talking.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

You don't hear anyone threaten
ing to knock the spots off the sun.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

1t is the province ofa wise man
to bear poverty with equanimitz.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

The virtue Of man ought to be
measured, not by extraordinary ex-
ertions but BY his everyday con-
duet
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26


into law, whereas those who watch
ed the methods of is preparation
sa" That 1t was but vast and vo'
luminous system of class taxation
IN which private interests were in
v''ed and allowed to write their
own demands upon a tax paying
people. Its Immediate and natural
effects have been mitigated by
enormous harvests and foiIed by
those elements of exuberant pros.
Perity with which our country be-
yond all others IS blessed, but it is
ana w''l continue as long as it re-
mains on our statutebook an unjust
distribution OF the burdens of Gov
ernment and Of the avails of indus
Try Inc scheme OF SO called roci-
Proc'ty Incorporated into 1t Is based
upon the idea thatif other Govern
ments insist on making, or for
nscai reasons are compelled to
maze locd dear and scarce to their
PeoP'0 we VII retai'ate on our
''s' SOY ne'll2s shoes and sugar
ana Tea ana coHee scarcer and dearer
10 mem
ana iastiy' the force bill was
'nuch an administrative measure as
= persistent and almost passionate
advocacy OF such measure by the
president could make 1t. The bill
was not an ordinary remedial statue:
IL was at cross purposes with the
very structure of the State. she
who appoints the Judges said
'onii Auams, may nave what law
ne pleases' and If this be true
generally, with what undoubtcd
iorce would it apply TO the power of
appointing judges of electionsl Mr..
Jefferson said that the old Federal
lists, when beaten at all other points,
attempted to retire into the judi
ciary. The Lodge bill, willingly
OF unwittlngly, initiated their tac-
tics. IL proposed to give Federal
Judiciary, composed, with single
exception, OF Republican judges,
tuil cotrol through its appointees
OF elections for Representatives in
Congress and Presidential electors
In the States In order to prevent
sporadic cases OF fraud in the inter
est-oi one or the other party as the
case might be, 1t would have invited
OF permitted universal and pcrma-
nent fraud In the interest of one
party.
THE FORCE BILLS SHADOW.
but aside from its partisan pur-
poses and effects, 1t was an assault
on tue foundations of free govern
ment. Inc idea IRON which it
sprang and the principles on which
IL was founded were alike false and
vieious. IL was, even In its best in
tentions, very near to that fanati-
clsm that believes itcan change the
constitution OF human society, "undo
Ine work OF eyolution, and in its
own way remodel human life" 1t
proceeded on the idea that never
a'd' and. happily for us, never can,
nave any substantial basis, that
when two races live commingled in
'ife common citizenship of a State
or oongfess.onal district, to one of
wnom the ideas and habits of self
government and the skiilful use of
poi.elcal representation has, by tue
training oil Two thousand years, be-
come a second nature, where the
and little farther back from un-
speakable barbarism and ignorance,
political supremacy is a Nero ones.
The weekly register. [volume] (Point Pleasant, Va. [W. Va.]) 1862-1909, 1892-04-26

THE RECIPROCITY HuMBuG.
It has been proclaimed by its de-
lenders as the most harmonious
system of protection ever enacted
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1892-08-17

realization Of the ideal of justice The
intent of the Michigan Constitution in
qualifying the ideal standard by the
word practicable, or by such an equiv
alent expression as the words "as nearly
as may be" in the New York Constltu-
ton, was to give the legislature no ex-
cuse for complaining that it had not the
constitutional power to be fair. Such
language is intended to enable legisla-
lures 10 approach perfect honesty in
apportionment, not to enable them TO
get away from it,
The law laid down by the Supreme
Court of Michigan ought to be just as
readily recognized as the law Of New
York. A constitution is by it's very ma
ture based upon the principle Of the
equal rights OF citizens of the common
wealth constituted, and the right OF
equal representation is necessarily in
tended and implied because that is the
right preservative of all rights. To
strike at it is to strike at the very root Of
all government. 1t is no less than trea-
son. If it can not be punished as the
crime that it is it can certainly be out
lawed and nullified by the highest court
OF the State. If the criminals cannot
be put in prison they can at least be
prevented from keeping themselves on
the throne of power.-New York Press.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1892-08-17
Gerrymandering Is Unconstitutional.

The latest conspicuous step of the
courts In the direction OF equity and
common sense, as against the technical
tiles OF written law, is a long step, and
one of the most important, taken in the
history OF the Interpretation OF the law
by the American bench. 1t is the anti
gerrymander decision OF the Michigan
Supreme Court, of which fuller particu-
lars have come to hand. The Demo-
cratic Legislature s apportionment of AS
sembly and Senatorial districts is de-
clared unconstitutional, not on any
technical point, but on the general pre-
sumption that it is the purpose of the
constitution Of free commonwealth to
make representation equal, and that the
ratio of representation which it provides
for shall govern the apportionment as
far as practicable.
The question of what is practicable
is not to be settled by the standard of
might makes right" applied by un-
scrupulous party power, but by the un-
avoidable limitations which county ter.
ritory and populations put upon the
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1892-08-17
without New York.

The Democratic papers which are try
Ing to figure out how they can put
Cleveland in the Presidency without Sc
curing the electoral vote of New York
have engaged in task which is beyond
their powers. In order TO win there are
223 electoral votes to be secured. The
solid South, with Connecticut and New
Jersey, have only 175 votes. or forty
eight less than the number necessary to
elect. Under the district system of
voting for President which prevails in
Michigan, the Democrats will secure
three or four votes in that State. Let US
call the number five, and make the Dem
cratic total $50 votes. Thus $50 are as
sured tho Democrats without any ques-
ton. The Republicans are not claiming
any Of the ex-slave States, nor are they
counting on carrying either Connecticut
or New Jersey, while they will lose
some votes in Michigan. But where
are the Democrats going to get the
other forty-three votes which they will
have to secure if they are to win? If
we give them Indiana they will still need
twenty-eig votes, and if we throw in
Montana, which is considered somewhat
doubtful. they will be twenty-five votes
short yet. In what quarter should they
look for enough votes to fill this gap!
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1892-08-17

DAVID B. HILL just now is per-
picking and alarming the Democratic
party and especially the Cleveland
leaders by refusing to say anything.
He perversely refuses to improve the
opportunity now offered to show his
magnamity and his loyalty in defeat
as well as in victory by exclaiming,
II am a Democrat" He has not, in
deed, the power to make himself any,
thing. But he has the power to say
that Grover Cleveland shall never
again be President. Perhaps he is
waiting for an offer of the position of
Secretary Of State in Cleveland's
second administration.
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1892-08-17
Blocking Its Own Game.

That what the Democratic party is
doing, very effectually. In it's national
convention 1t snubbed and maltreated
the New York delegates, offended Hill
and Tammany, and destroyed all pros
poets of carrying that State. 1t
adopted free trade plank that will be an
impossible barrier to its success in the
other close Eastern States. 1t has thus
barred itself out of the places where it
has customarily gone for its best sup
port, aside from the solid South.
To compensate for this loss IL must
make important gains somewhere else.
1t must carry Western States which
have ordinarily gone Republican. What
is the prospect in this direction9 What
has il 10 offer in the way OF inducements
to the West? The free trade plank will
probably be claimed as bid for West
ern support. But the West is not con-
corning itself much about the tariff now;
IL Is interested in finance. What has
Democracy to offer in the line of finance
that will attract the West2
The candidate and the platform prom
Use nothing. In fact, they are a guar
anty that. il Democracy wins, the West
has nothing to expect except that the
government will be steered further
away from the reform which IL desires.
Still, IL Congress had taken favorable
action upon silver, the Western States
might have been induced to overlook
the ticket and platform, and hold the
Republican administration responsible
for defeat OF free coinage provided the
President had vetoed the bill. But
Congress, acting under instructions of
the party leaders, has shut off all hope
The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1892-08-17
Ridiculous Lying.

The Bourbon majority of the House
Committee on Agriculture do not seem
to realize the absurdity of asking the
American people TO accept and act upon
partisan assertions which directly OPP
pose facts known to the whole country
1t was smart politics to assert vehe-
mently in the fall of 1890 that the Nc
Kinley law would so anger and turn
against the United States all the ma
tions Of the earth that we must lose our
foreign market. Then there was enough
color of probability about the predic-
tions of Democratic writer's and speak
ers to make their bold and ceaseless
iteration OF dismal prophecies effective
in an election. Now every man who
has the least knowledge of current
events Is informed that the ex-
ports of the United States have been
greater since the enactment of the
Mckinley law than ever before,
and the whole country understands
that the sales OF farm products to Eu-
rope have been nprecedentedly large