davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
sCROoLROOM HUMoR.

Curious Mistak~s Made by Pupils in
Answering Questions
Amid the perpleXities o. teachers
life, the quiet, often unconscious humor
of the schoolroom serves TO keep the ped
agogue alive and outside of the insane
ASYLUM.
Young America is great in many
fields, but in the role of photographer
he is probably at his best
The following definitions and illus
trative sentences, culled from the ex-
animation papers of the pupils of a
western school, illustrates some of the
bold changes that Young America de-
lights In:
Magpie-The girl made magpie for
dinner.
R2utine-He has bottle of routine
NoXious-She is a very noxious girl
Coilege-A place where graduaters
60.
Rebel-A kind OF hawk.
College-Cemetary of learning.
Hvdraulics-A disease.
Augle-Sae made left-angle.
Wamplm-A kind Of bee.
Svlph-One's own sylph.
Beacon-A minister.
League-Ten dollars.
NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. of an Indian
chief
Guerrilla-An animal ~
Tariff-A sofa
Charlatan-A musical instrument
Guerrilla-A man-eater.
Tariff-An animal found in Africa.
Tariff-A stuffed seat
Tariff-A place for worship.
Creole-A white descendant from
black parents
Plumbago-A blockhead
As high school student of history
and science, Young America has some
peculiar views:
1.-The time of the best literaHure of
country is called the Augustus period"
''King Philip was a great hider and
seeker"
"Artless Ward was an American hui
morist"
In answer to the request to name
three American poets, a boy mentions
Benjamin Franklin, Shakespeare and
John B. Cough" e-rr
A Young high school student has
made the discovery that ''The spinal
cord serves as support to the back"
During an attempt to develop the
idea and use of the superlative degree
of the adjective, the following CONVEX
sation took place:
Teacher see a pretty girl, and you
see one who Is better locking than the
first Now. how can you describe the
second girl by the use of the word
pretty?
Pupil-The second girl is prettier
Teacber-Very good. Now, suppose
you see n girl who is better looking
than either OF the others, what would
you call her?
Pupil should call her a daisy
Wide Awake.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
A Pensv,vania MillIonaIrs Gone.

MEADsvILLE, Pa, Jan 15.-Prof. AL
bert Huidekoper, aged 50 years, died at
his home in this city. Tie deceased
was a son of Harmer Huidekoper,
agent here for the Holland Land Co.,
which owned great tracts of land in
this section and the Huidekopers.
among others became very rich. The
present deceased leaves an estate of
$4,000. 900, his heirs being his son, Maj
Arthur Huidekoper. of this place. and
Mrs. Emma Cortezzo, now sojourniug
in Rome, Italy. The deceased was the
founder of the Meadsville theological
school and Unitarian college.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

The BEST medical writers claim that the
successful remedy for nasal catarrh must
be non-irritating, easy of application, and
one that will, by its own action, reach all
the remote sores and liberated surfaces.
The history of the efforts to treat catarrh
during the past few years obliges US to ad-
init that only one remedy has completely
met these conditions, and that is Ely's
Cream Balm This safe and pleasant rem
edy, which Is to be found at any drug
store, has mastered catarrh as nothing else
has ever done, and both physicians and
patients freely concede this fact. The more
distressing symptoms quickly yield TO it.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
y Paving Mine discovered.

DENVER Col, Jan. IA strike
which promises to rival Cripple creek
has been made about nine miles north
of Canon City, Col, between the latter
place and the new gold fields of Cripple
creek. on what is known as the Mouth
of Milsap. Parties have been working
the vein and keeping the matter quiet
for month past, but the secret has
leaked out and the truth of the mat
Ter was made known The property
is forty-foo: vein of mineral-bear-
ing rock with pay streak of about
three feet. The ore is silver and cop
per, recent tests giving $50 in silver
and 40 per cent copper.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
A somnambulist's Lean.

LITTLE Rock, Ark, Jan. 15.-Capt II.
A. Schwanake, civil engineer OF ma
tional repute, had a narrow escape
from instant death in this city. He
rose from his bed in the hotel Richelieu
and walked directly to the window, and
after lifting the same stepped to the
window sill and leaped to the ground
below. Fortunately the fall was
broken by a porch. He being a man
of powerful build, however, weighing
more than 200 pounds, the porch proved
no barrier. and he went headlong to
the sidewalk. a distance of eighteen
feet When discovered he was uncon-
scious and is in a critical condition.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
HoH's Thiai

We offer One Hundred Dollars Reward
for any case of Catarrh that can not be
cured by Halls Catarrh Cure
+. j. CHENEY a. Co, Props, Toledo, O.
We the undersigned, have known +. J.
Cheney for the last Is years, and believe
him perfectly honorable in all business
transactions and financially able to carry
out any obligations made by their firm.
West a. Truax, Wholesale Druggists, To-
Wholesale Druggists, Toledo, Ohio.
Halls Catarrh Cure is taken internally,
acting directly upon the blood and mucous
surfaces of the system. Price 75c. per bot
tie Sold by all druggists. Testimonials free
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

IN direct succession PRINCE GEORGE.
to the throne i Prince George Freder-
lex Earnest Albert of Wales, brother
of the duke. He was born June 3,
1865. He soon displayed a prediction
for naval affairs, and, after serving in
minor capacities, was appointed, in
March, 1899, to the command of the
new gunboat Thrush; wnie on this
vessel he was attached to the British
North American squadron. In August
he was promoted 10 commander of her
majesty's fleet
The death of prince Albert Victor
does not remove n shining light from
the royal circle. The English people
did not like him and they seriously dis
liked the thought of ever having to en-
dure him as king. He was born at
Frogmore, January 8, 1864.
The dukes betrothal with the princess
of Teck was regarded as good royal
move, as the princess has a popularity
that would have insurel parliament
AIRY allowance of liberal proportion.
The following is the text of a cable
message sent to Minister Lincoln 10y
Secretary Blaine:
Lincoln. Minister, London:
Express deep regret and sincere condolences
OF the president by reason of tho lamented
death of the duke of Clarence and Avondale.
BLAINE
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
'Twss Ever Tins

When lady on Davenport street
opened her side doer in answer to a
KNOCK she found shivering specimen
of the genus tramp there
please, madam" he began with
much suavity, Il am most starved:
could you give me bite to eat?"
Ny poor fellow" said the lady kind
ly, Il have nothing in the house but
a very small quantity of rye"
'Oh, madam" exclaimed the de-
lighted tramp, 'ff there is anything I
dote on it is clear, genooine old-fash-
Toned rye"
Bread; you shall have the heel of
the loaf-here it is" and she handed
him piece of petrifed rye bread that
would have taxed the digestion of a
brass monkey.
Then she softly closed the door
Detroit Free Press
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
A Big Regular Army.

The mightiest host of this sort is the army
of invalids whose bowels, livers and stOm-
achs have been regulated by Hostetter s
Stomach Bitters. A regular habit of body
is brought about through using the Bitters.
not by violently agitating and gripping the
intestines, but by reinforcing their energy
and causing a flow of the bile into its proper
channel Malaria, la grippe. dyspepsia, and
a tendency to inactivity Of the kidneys, are
conquered by the Bitters.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
Coal Ordered to Chill In Haste.

SAN Francisco, Jan. 16.-The COL
lier San Mateo has been chartered
to take coal from Nanalmo to Chilli
The captain of the collier states that
the United States government has
chartered the vessel and has ordered
him to get his cargo through as rapidly
as possible.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
Brass Works.

WATERBURY,, Conn, Jan. 16.-The
entire rolling mill and wire mill plants
OF the Waterbury Brass Co, to-
gether with the engine room with it's
mammoth engines and the numerous
side buildings, were burned. The loss
on buildings and machinery IS esti-
mated at $500, 200. The origin is I'M
known The total Insurance. is SS7, 600.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

ALBEkI NICIOh. dJIuCh Va Ia BllppC.
The young prince had been ill but a
few days.
On receipt of the news the lord mayor
gave orders to have the great bell in
St Paufs cathedral tolled.
The bells in st. Paul's are never
tolled save on the occasion of the
death of an heir to the throne, and
therefore no further information was
necessary for the people of London
to make them aware that, after gal
liant struggle, the duke had finally
succumbed
The announcement of his death
caused far less commotion in the city
than was expected, but this was no
doubt due to the fact that nearly every
body had given up hope Wednesday.
The bells in Westminster abbey were
tolled from 10 o'clock until !.
The news of the death of Albert Vic
tor was early broken to the Princess
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

Do You want to enjoy the exubcrance of
perfect healthl Do you want your cheeks
TO be rosy, and your whole system thrilled
with rich, pure blood coursing through its
veinss Then use DIR. John Bulls Sarsapa-
rilla 1t will do what no other medicine
will do. 1t will make you feel like another
person.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
The Ladies.

The pleasant effect and perfect safety
with which ladies' may use the California
liquid laxative Syrup of Figs, under all con-
ditions, makes it their favorite remedy. To
get the true and genuine article, look for
the name of the California Fig Syrup Co,
printed near the bottom of the package
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
A Pittsburgh Paper turned Out.

PITTSBURGH, Pa, Jan. l6.-Shortly
before midnight yesterday fire broke
out in the Leader building and de-
stroyed it and the block adjoining. The
total loss to the Leader is $50, 600. With
S45, Oo0 insurance.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
The Only One Ever Printed-Can You Find
the Word?

There is a inch display advertisement
in this paper, this week, which has no two
words alike except one word. The same is
true of each new one appearing each week,
from The DR.. Harter Medicine Co. This
house places n Crescent on everything
they make and publish Look for it, send
them the name of the word and they will
return you book, beautiful Autographs or
samples free.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

GIVE your children DR.. Bulls Worm De-
stroyers. These moe candies will never do
them harm and may do them much good.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

Victoria Mary of
Teck, to whom he
was to have been
married in Febru-
airy. She was of
course greatly pros
trated Albert Vic
tor was % years
old.
BY the death of
the duke of Clar-
ence and Avondale,'
the next person to
the prince of Wales
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
Dangerously Drowsy.

VIRGINIA, Ill, Jan. 16-John Roberts,
of Bearistown. who is in the county
Jail in this city charged with burglary,
fell asleep last Sunday and every effort
to arouse him has proved futile.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

A MANS character is like a Photographic
negative 1t is a blank until it has been
subjected to the chemistry of circumstances.
Washington Star
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

FoR THROAT DISEASES AND CoUGHs use
BROwN's BRONCHIAL TROCHEs Like all
really good things, they are Initiated. The
genuine are sold only in bOres.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

elder son of the
prince of Wales,
and, after his father,
heir to the throne
of England, died at
9 o'clock yesterday
at Sandringham
hall, residence of
the prince of Wales,
near Lynn Regis,
n or f o ! k s h ire.
Death was caused
by pm e u m o n i a,
growing out of an
attack of la grippe.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

KEEP It in the house. The American
Brewing Co.'S st. Louis "a B. c. Bohe-
milan Bottled Beer" Pure, sparkling
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
DONALD KENNEDY
Of Roxbury, Mass, Says:

Strange cases cured by my Medical Discov-
cry come TO me every day. Here Is one of
OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES the Grip. Now how does
my Medical Discovery cure all these1 don't
know. unless It takes hold OF the Hidden Poison
that makes all Humor.
VIRGINIA CITY. NEVADA. Sept. sth fssf
Donald Rennedy-Dedr Sir: will state my case
TO you; About nine years ago was paralyZed in
my left side and the best doctors gave me no eeief
for two years. and was advised 70 try your Dis
covery, which did Its duty. and in q few months
was restored to health About four years ago be-
cnrnc blind In my left eye by a spotted cataract.
Last March was taken with La Grippe, and was
confined TO my bed for three months. At the end of
that time as Ia ths start, then It struck mo that
your Discovery was the thing for me: so got
bottle and before It was half gone Was able to go
TO my work in the mines. Now In regard To my eyes
as lost my left eye. ami about six months ago my
right eye became Affected with BLACK spot. over the
sight as did the left eye-perhaps some twenty OF
them-but since have been using your Discovery
they all left my hight eye but one; and. thank Col
the bright light of heaven is once more making its
appearance In my ls;t eye. am wonderfully aston
ishet ut IL, AM thank God and your Medical
Discovery. Yours truly, HANK WHITE.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

"WuAT a red head that fellow has"
yep! ! guess melancholy must have
marked him for her roan."-Puck-
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

A STATESMAN can always get pull by
going TO the dentists ofice-Binghamto
Republican.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

STUDENT Tin beer-tavern) What lucky
creature your dog is-likes water.-Flie-
gende Blaetter.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
THE PRINCE DEAD.

Death of Albert Victor. Heir Presumpt;ve
to the Throne of EnGland-A Break in
the Royal Succession.
LONDON, Jan 15.-Prince Albert
Victor Christian Edward, duke of Clar-
ence and AvOndale and earl of Afhlnne
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

DoN'T pen missives to your best girl on
postal cards. She may have a suspicion
that you do not care two cents for her
Union County Standard.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

IT il not very serious matter to quarrel
with an actress She never refuses to
make p."-Boston Post
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

Two oY trade can never agree Work
men can't even roll barrels Of -four without
o little falling out
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

$50 DARK, and yet so hghtr' as the man
said when he looked at his new ton of coal
brakes Magazine.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

DENTISTS are not looked upon as peculiar
ly dissipated yet they are always filling up
Chicago Times.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

CURE your cough with Hale's Honey Of
HOrehound and Tar.
Pixies Toothache Drops Cure in one minute.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

Is YOUR blood poor? Take Beecham's
Pills Is your liver out of order? Use
Beecham's Pills. 25 cents box.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

The only woman a man has a right
to dictate to IS his beautiful and attrac-
tive typewriter. Dallas News.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

WooL-'Is your mOther-in-law still will
you" Van Pelt-'No; still agIn me IN
V Herald
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22

FOR THE CHILDREN.
My little girl suffered for three from large Acess on her hip the result
fall dahon The Ascs all which discharged
induced friends give her and by the time the fifth bottle
J. A.
WIEGNER, Sahrgfn, Pa
attacked obstinate ECZEMA Blood
Specific
cure was wonderful. D. RAINS, ALatEaDzlt
developing the chnds health Treatise mailed free.
SWIFT SPECIFIC COMPANY ATLANTA, Ga.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-01-22
Not Complimentary to the Boy.

Mr.. Bopeep lat the stock yards, buy
ing sheep)-Didn't fetch no bell-wether
down this trip.
Herder-How yer goin' { drive m?
Mr.. Bopeep-My son Ike I'll go on
ahead. He looks SO much like one r
tn crowd they'll foller him.--Judge.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
MOckersOn,
ED. DEMOCRAT.

ED DEMOCRAT.
1t seems that the people in
this neighborhood have put on
new life since the nomination Of
Clev sland, and his election in
November will mean new lie TO
the whole country; butthe cleo.
ton of Harrison would mean a
continuation OF progressive Re-
publican ruin to the whole coun.
try. The present rams are
quite damaging to wheat, caus,
lug it to sprout in the shock,
farmers like about q week being
done plowlng, Mrs. DR., Powell
is very low, Miss Hannah Roper
is sick also and is under the
treatment of DR.. Powell,
Frank, the little son OF Mr..
and Mrs. w. P. Conner has been
quite sick with pneumonia the
past week.
j, l.. Coffman and George
Malone Of Giles Go. passed
through our village last Week.
Mr.. Caffman is the nominee
for, Tax Assessor in Giles c"unty
the Democrats made a good
choice and will never regret it,
Mr. Ber, Pace of Arkata La, is
visiting his Bro, of this place. =.
Pi1hook has a street car line
L the Law 10 not better enfor.
ced in this district, we will be
compelled to call on the Militir.
4 Shoot them again Fleetwood
Hurrah Tor Cleveland an Steyeu.
sou and Cover too.
DEMOCRAT.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
DEATH

Mysterious death has once again
spread his sabor wings over our
town and elaine d as his own
George Mcster Jr. flushed in
eternal Stiffness is the personal
identity Of George Mester Jr.,
whose ever Galthiul keeping OF
duty's task, make INN sadly
missed by those accustomed to
his Willingness to aid and assist,
always serving never complain
ing, cheerful and agreeable he
did his daily task.
Whatever there is in Catholis-
! tic rites and customs be it
SUPERSTITION or what not, had a
devout ard Jealous daily prac-
ticer il George. lie did this
pc: ance as regularly as the call,
snd cheerful. Unfortunate in lie
lie was the special attention OF
his father and mother, dear to
them, and sisters and brothers,
and enjoyed the friendship Of
all.
BIT sorrow smites doubly on
the heart OF the living at the
tomb, that claims the hushed
pulsation Of what remains NOR
tai Of him, entombing the cod
and chilled brow that rests in
peaceful and still Decay, wien
We remember it is all the work
of the assassin's bullet, shot
merciless and abandoned to die
in his own blood, with out justi-
tldcation gushin G out. After
one weeks suffering George pas
sed into the unknown to await
whatever is gooG or bad for him,
TO die is the way of all but to be
murdered is horrible. TO the
bereved sympithy and aconsciuos
joyous hope, In death there is life
1t is not death but glorious
transition.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
THEPOLIGE GAZETTE

Is the only illustrated paper
in The void Containing all the
latest sensational and sporting
news. No Solcon Keeper, BalN
Der or Club Room cah afford to
re without It. 1t always makes
friends wherever it goes.
Mailed to any address in the
United States, securely wrapped,
| Is weeks for 1925.
Send Five Cents fol sample
copy.
RICHARD X. FOX,
PraIfl;pS usre New York CITY.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22

ana l hope they will see where
you are right, and turn out on
that day" and carry it to the
letter. About the lone scar state,
yon just watch our smoke, we
will show You people how the
cat hoped,
7 have been taking the Union
second hauded Tor s'mosta year
wh,n the time expires / intend
to have it marked discontinued
and subscribe for the Democrat in
order to get the home news.
Success to the Dc1Hocrct and its
followers.
A. w. Bills.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
CLEBURNE TEXAS.
To The DEMOCRAT.

TO The DEMOCRAT.
This being my first attempt to
write for a paper | hope you will
excuse all bad mistakes, never
theless will do my best.
The farmers claim they have
better prospects for a good all
around crop through this part of
Texas, than they have had for a
number of years, compared with
last years crop, they have from
five to ten bales Of cotton lett
over from last years crop that
they could not dispose Of for one
half Of what it was really with.
Grain and potatoes are what they
are after this year: more money
aud less labor is what they are
looking for now, and | can not
blaim them for that,
The thermometer has been or
an average of 81 degree in th(
shade here for the last TIVE
months and that enough t,
make any body hunt a shade O
q storm hou1e
Well how is old Law renee an.
Democracy? teach the reader
of Jour paper how it Is done, {
mean Tics. that don. know
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
FOR TRUSTEE.

We are authorized to announce j..
\. springer as a candidate for Trustee
OF Lawrence county election first
Thursday in August 1892.
We are authorized to announce f.
NJ. LINCOLN of Wayne Station, as Il
. candidate for the Office of TRUSTEE for
Lawrence County, subject to the will
ofthe people. Election rst Thurs
day in August 1892.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
FOR TAN ASSESSOR.

We are authorized to announce j.
F. Busby as a candidate for Tax As
SCISSOR for Lawrence County election
frs: Thursday in August 1892.
We are authorized to announce f.
C. Simms "a Il candidate for Tax AS
lessor of Lawrence County subject to
the will of the people. Election first
Thursday in August 1892.
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
FOR REPRESENTATIVE.
FOR REPRESENTATIVE

We are authorized anrounS the
name Of NJ. l.. Cove as n candidate
for r preventative from Lawrence
County in the next term of LegisIa,
ture. Subject t, the Democratic Con.
ventiop
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
CONVENTION.

The Democratic voters CT the
Sth.. district are called to meet
in the Court house on Saturday
July 23rd.. 1892 20 select dele
gates to the county convention
which meets July 18th. 1892 at
LawFenceburg,
District Committee,
Lawrence democrat. (Lawrenceburg, Tenn.) 1884-1925, 1892-07-22
FOR SHERIFF..

We are authorized to announce
Sam II. Austin candidate tot Shcr-
i'll o. Lawrence county, election first
lhurSday in August 1892.
We are authorized to announce
Polk Conner ASA candidate for Sheriff
of Lawrence County subject to the
will of the people. Election first
Thursday in August 1892,