The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-01-02
Why Marriage Nay Be = Failure.

If there is one thing more than another
calculated to throw man into gnashins
of the teeth and tearing Of the hair condi
ton it is his attempt to give the wife o
his bosom an account Of some ordinar,
affairs, to which she listens after thi
fashion:
He-"Oh, my dear, I must tell yot
something Jack Burroughs told me to -da.
while"
She-"Where did you see Jack Bur
roughs9"
"Oh, We went to luncheon together
and
"How did you happen to 60 out to
luncheon together9"
"Well, We didn't exactly 60 out togeth
er: I met Jack on the restaurant steps
and"
"What Restaurant"
"Calloway's; and Jack"
"How did you happen to 60 to Gallo.
way's9 thought you always lunched al
Draper's."
II nearly always do; but just hap
pened to drop into Calloway's to-day,
along with Jack and"
docs he always lunch at Calloway's?''
"I'm sure, my dear" "a little sharply,
''that don't know if he does or not. 1t
makes no earthly difference if"
ooh, of course not" (Hastily) 81 just
wondered he did; that'sal Go on with
your story"
swell, while we were eating our soup,
Jack"
"What kind of soup2"
"Turtle. Jack said that"
81 thought you disliked turtle soup
"Well, / don't care much about it
but -"
"How did you happen to order it if you
didn't care for it?"
because I did. Severely. But the
soup has nothing to do with the story
"Oh, Of course not. Qn grieved tone).
I never said that it did. l don't see why
you should get cross over simple ques-
ton. Go on"
"Well, while we were eating our soup,
Lawrence Hildreth and his new wife came
in, and"
"They did2'
II have just said So"
"Well, you needn't be so cross about it."
"They came in, and"
us she pretty?"
"Pretty enough. Jack bowed and"
"Does he know them2"
"Well, now, do you suppose he would
have bowed if he hadn't known them!
declare if L"
allow was she dressed2"
"How should l know? l never looked
at her dress. What ! was going to tell
you was that"
"Did they sit near you?"
"Yes; at the next table. And while they
were ordering, Jack said that they"
"Couldn't they hear him7"
DO you suppose (iercely) that Jack
would have no more sense than to let
them hear him talking about them2 I'll
swear il"
James, if you can't tell simple little
incident without getting into q passion
you'd better keep it to yourself. What
did Jack say7"
'He said that Miss Hildreth's father was
opposed to the match and"
How did he know that2"
Great Cesar! There you go againw
James, will you please remember that
it is your wife to whom you are speaking,
sir7'
mo other woman would drive me raw
ing, distracted, crazy, asking silly ques
lions about"
"Jamesr'
"Every time try to tell you anything
you begin, and you"
"James, (rising with dignity and saying
stiff1y) do not propose listening to any
such insulting remarks, and"
You never listen to anything. That's
the trouble. If"
When l ask simple question you"
I'D say Simple You've asked me
million simple questions in the last half.
hour, just because was going to tell you
that Jack Burroughs said that"
II do not wish to hear what Mr.. Jack
Burroughs says if you cannot tell it re-
specially. | shall have my dinner sent
to my room since it is so painful for you
to eat with an idotl' (Retires scornfully.
while he narrowly escapes an attack of
aPoplexy).-Smith's Monthly.
How'd RI Es~l L.