Griggs courier., 1892-06-24
pUNoENr PARAoRAPHs.


! PUNoENT PARAGRAPHS.
Mrs B.-s.Dear mel what Lowell,
closets this fiat has!' Agent Madame
those are not the closets They are th,
bedrooms. .''-Harper's Bazar.s
!. -Twynn-sWhat awful Language
that parrot uses!" Triplett-"You Sc.
his cage hangs in the same room will
the telephone."-Ex.
Man is a good deal like q fish. Yor
know the fish would never get in very
serious trouble if it kept it's mouth shut
-Yonkers Statesman.
Tommy s'Paw, when q man com
nits political suicide does he shoot his
head Off" Mr.. Figg-"No; merely his
mouth. indianapolis Journal
An Exception.-''Remem Brud.
Ter, dat de rain falls on bofe de just an
lie unjust" "Huh! Notwhen de unjust
Kin borry an umbrella, Deacon. BLACK
ind White.
-Charlie-"1 pity you, Jack, when
zee your creditors pushing you. That
s a trouble never had" Jack-"No.
You probably never had any credit. -
Kate Fields Washington.
EXTRACT from a NoveL-ssThe no.
sary, meanwhile, as was his custom,
walked up and down the garden, with
mis- hands on his back, Gag erly perusing
4 per.''-Fliegende Blatter.
-Decolette Salary.-She-"Mrs. Fig
urante is said to put about Everything
aer husband earns on her back" He
II should judge by her gown tonight
chat his salary had been reduced.
Y. Y. Herald.
-sAre you sure Parker married Mrs.
2. for love?" Certainly. Do you sup
pose q man who not only lets his wife
GUY his neckties, but actually wears
them, doesn't love her passionately?"-
Harper's Bazaar.
Mrs. Gray-"I fear I am failing
:ast." Mrs. Green-'sNonsense! only
hope shall look as well when I am Of
your age" Mrs. Gray .(sotto voce)-
''When she is of my age! The hateful
Did thing!"-Boston Transcript.
"A Cause, for Silence. Ito
Maud, who has just looked through
Mabel's MSS. )-"You didn't know
was an authoress, Maud, did you?''
Maud-''No, my dear; and il you take
ny advice, you won't let any body else
know it, either"
They had had a little party of guests
ut the house, and he remarked to his
wife, as he was getting ready for bed,
that he fattered himself he had acted
the part of host in rather brilliant
manner. 81 can recall only one brill
liant action of yours" said his wife.
swell, what was that?" Lighting the
gas" -
-Intuition.-Col. Gorehunter-t.Ah,
ny dear Miss Pinkerly, this is an unex-
pected pleasure, to have you alone for
few moments. Wouldn't you like to
hear how I got through the enemy's
ines at Chattanooga?' Miss Pinkerly
81 can easily imagine, colonel. You
probably bored your way through. IN.
Y. Sun. ~. ~
Maria" called out Mr.. Billus in an
agitated voice, 81 have lost my pocket
oook; can't find it anywhere!' ssIt is
exactly where you left it last night,
John," replied Mrs. Billus from the top
If the stairway. ''Itis inthe left hip
pocket of the striped trousers you hung
Up on the last hook Of the closet; but
here isn't anything in it-now.'''-Chi-
.ago Inter-Ocean.
Mrs. Sicovit-ssI am completely dis
yusted with the habit our society ladies
Ire getting into of conversing in French.
There should be a duty on all foreign
languages coming into our country"
Mr.. Verityred-stO, that is unnecessary,
{ assure you. Their French is not q
foreign article. 1t is most decidedly q
aome product" "-Harper's Bazaar.
"A pretty girl from Kalamazoo visit
ing friends in Detroit (says the, Free
Press), met . young man the other
evening at o. reception. ''Are you a
resident Of Detroit?' he asked, shortly
after their meeting. 90, no, J" she said,
'.I'm ffbm Kalamazoo..'''1 A peculiar
smile fitted across his face; a smile Of
half-sympathy, half-suanering. "And
you," she asked, quickly noting II, as
women do, land you are from the other
placer" He nodded. It was true. He
was from Oshkosh. .