The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1892-02-23
The Apostasy OF Jerry Simpson.

deep subject. DR.. VAN DYKE.
The Apostasy OF Jerry Simpson.
We regret to notice that the Hon. JERE-
M1AH SIMPSON OF Medicine Lodge. Kansas.
| still continues tho practice Of riding to the
Capitol every morning on bicycle. He
learned tho bicycle habit. We believe. from
| that other distinguished philanthropist and
economist. Mr.. HENRY GEORGE. Tom JOHN
son. the illustrious Ohio reformer, Is an
other rollicking bicycler. and another
pupil OF the apostle OF tho Single Tax and
| the Claimant. Whether the Hon. THOMAS
G. SHEAnMAN OF Brooklyn is also rider OF
| the horse Of steel. and whether there is any
secret relation between free trade and bicy-
| Gle riding we shall not undertake to declare.
| The bicycle habit Is hcalthful and laudable.
| and we should think that good spin every
day in tho open mir might scatter some OF
| tho vapors in the brains OF that eminent
! trio Of statesmen. Mr.. JOHNSON. Mr.. S1Mp-
+ son. and Mr.. GEORGE. But was 1t
| right for Mr.. GEORGE to teach Mr.. SIMPSON
| tho use and practice Of the bicycle Mr..
SIMPSON came to this town few months
ago to study farming In Wall street and
observe the iniquities Of banks and bank
ers and oil other plutocrats. 1t may have
| been for tho purpose OF distractng him
from the melancholy reflections inspired by
tho sight OF the Stock Exchange and the
Produce Exchange that Mr.. GEORGE mount
ed him upon the swift-revolving wheel.
| Whatever the motive. the result cannot but
be unfortunate for the Sockless SOCRATES.
| In the first place. the effect OF bicycle OK
ercise upon Mr.. SIMPSON will be bad. Bad.
we mean. for his business as an F. A. and q
P p statesman. AS his liver Is shaken up.
his digestion improved. his appetite in
creased. and the roses OF health bloom more
brightly upon his sun-dried cheek. the
bilious hue OF his politics will disappear.
| The eyelids Of his mind will cease to he
granulated. He will look forth from no
congested OPTICS and he will begin to see
that things are not what they have seemed
to him. He will cease to hate the loath-
some mortgage or to kick his magnificent
and now sock-girt feet against the money
power OF the deciduous East He will re-
member that Kansas has had crops OF I'M
usual exuberance. and that her farms and
| farmers and all her interests are prosper
Ing. He will long no more to bedeck the
Sunfower State with shinplasters. He will
| come out from under the cold shade Of
PETERS beard and rejoice with the rest Of
us in the light Of hope. He will be happier
than he has been since he was merry lad
| in Canada. q country In which. by the way.
he was mighty glad to wear socks for nine
months in the year.
Bicycle riding. in fact. will prevent Mr..
SIMPSON from continuing to do business as
Farmers Alliance aud Peoples party
leader and seer. He will lose the notion
that Kansas and the rest Of the country arc
rushing Sheolwards. and he will become
boomer instead OF screech owl. He will
become a son Of Joy. and tho springs OF
calamity will be dried up in him. Alas.
alas. for JERRY! The healthier and the hap
pier no becomes. the worse for his business.
And as for his constituents. arc they the
men to receive with composure or digest
with patience tho intelligence that their
representative is rolling along Pennsyl-
vania avenue on wheel Can they i'm
agine to themselves without horror. the
picture OF their JERRY. plain. honest. simple.
homespun JERRY. behaving like wretched
"dude." attired perhaps In short clothes
and long stockings. and wearing on his
brain-burdened head the cap, the badge OF
servitude. Of some bicycle club? Was 1t for
this that the daughters OF Kansas swore to
Danish every sweetheart who wouldn't vote
the Alliance ticketp Was 1t for this that
Mrs. LEASE and Mrs. DIdGs swept tho
heavens OF eloquence with their bright
pinions? The people Of Medicine Lodge
do not ride bicycles. The toilers of Kansas.
II they are in the straits in which they are
said TO be by the calamity corners OF the
Alliance. have no money to waste on lux
ures. Happy are they II OK or horse is not
taken from them to pay their tribute to the
loathsome MORTGAGE. The idea OF having
fancy steed Of steel. costing 500 or 5000
or more. is something transcendlng their
widest dreams OF luxury. They need
no bicycle. JERRY. when they trace tho
slow furrow or drive the burdened
vain. We make our agricultural dction
purposely poetic. JERRY. because you are
poet. and approach agriculture with a
highly inaamed imagination. But you
know yourself. JERRY. that the downtrod-
den farmers OF Kansas would as soon think
OF buying the Capitol for marble dust as OF
buying bicycle. The Kansas roads are
not good for bicycling. any way; and II they
were, the poor farmers would still have no
money for bicycles. Why. man alive. don't
You know that they lsck corn 10 burn when
they are a-ooldr While they are huddled