The Roanoke times. [volume] (Roanoke, Va.) 1890-1895, 1892-05-27

SthohSSCiS Will SGnCIllCS
for the fair. There were so many of
them that the men with honest
propositions on the subject couldn't
get chance to be heard. How
ever, if the Worlds Fair Accom-
mediation Company would take my
l. o. U. for ten dollars down and
the subsequent monthly installmcnts
should feel that l had not paid IL cent
more than the thing was worth. Then
the stranger said, in somewhat weary
tone, that he did not doubt that the
company would be glad to do it. lie
would consult the president. I don't
remember to have met the president,
but we must know each other, for
haven't seen his agent since.
I was reminded of him few days
later, however, by my barber, who,
while he Clipped little pieces off my
Adams apple, interrupted the ordinary
flow of his discourse to remark:
by the way, suppose you are going
to the great fair?"
With the glittering steel at my throat
confessed that it was my intention to
visit Chicago while the robbery was in
progress.
"Thcn, wish you would look into
little plan of mine," said he, as he drew
the edge of the razor with harsh,
grating sound over his thumbnail "Of
course you realize what crowd there'l
be in all the BARRIERS shops in Chicago
during the fair. Well sir, for 81 down
and 81 a month from now till tho fair
opens, You can get n ticket which will
entitle you to be next gent in any first
class shop in the city. Our combination
includes all the best places, where
and lie rooted out the stubblc from the
rccesses of my pet dimple, "you can get
as good shave, pretty near, as you get
right in this chair
thanked him cordially for the oppor-
tunity, but added that intended to
raise beard before going to Chicago,
in order that 1 might be mistaken for a
western man, and thus get on the right
side of the layout.
AS to that matter of transportation
said Il stranger who was just getting
out of the next chair, 81 wish you would
look into little plan which has been
gotten up by the Columbian Round Trip
and Palace Car Company. For SCI, $40
down, and
Yes, yes; l know all about that"
said /, hastily. Every man, woman
and child l meet nowadays has worlds
fair scheme, and they're all alike"
well, sir" he continued, "for that
modest sum you are entitled to a first
class passage on one of the Eastern
lines magnificent steamships to Ma
chiasport, Me-, where you connect by
stage with the Canadian Pacifc's ele-
giant vestibulcd express for the west
and with only one change of cars, YOU
filter gently down into Chicago, and
never know what it is to feel the dis
comforts of ordinary travelling"
Here was IL really good liar. Some of
the others had bored me. 1t would bo
nice to hear him lie some more, so nut
leading question:
about route? admit that it's more
direct than some that have been nro-
posed to me. and yet it isn't exactly n
bee line, don't you know?n
Roundabout" he exclaimed. .sWbv.
man, you're travelling for pleasure and
to see the sights. Here / offer Won
free opportunity to behold all that
glorious scenery, to actually get out o.
sight o land on the way to Chicago and
see the sun rise over the broad ocean.
and You talk about going few miles
out of your way. Why, what do YOU
want, anyhow"
III tell you what l want" said I.
with icy calm. 81 want to kill the next
man who proposes to me scheme con-
nected with the worlds fair. I'm going
out to see it, for it'll be the biggest of
its kind that ever was, but the next
agent who springs u catchpenny device
on me will bite the dust, and it won't
be the sort of dust he's cunning for.
either. Sce?''
Somehow l never could keep good
resolution. l haven't killed a man vet,
though I've been approached by little
less than six thousand people with
schemes for getting my fair money be-
fore 1T is due. Once, however, was on
the very verge of murderous assault. 1t
was in the case of Judson G. Spiller.
Jud and went to school together years
ago. never liked him, but when we
met here in New York the sight of him
brought back to memory so many bows
and girls whom l did like, but never
meet, of course, that / shook his hand
with real cordially. We talked OF
many pleasant things in the past, and
nothing was further from my mind than
selfish, grasping schemes. But at
length he said: by the way, suppose
you're going to the great fair?"
paused and glared at him.
"of course you are" he continued
"Everybody's going"
This was just what they all had said.
Mentally was sharpening an ak for
,Judson.
IF you're thinking of going" he con-
tinued, Il wish you would look in"
hudson c. Spiller," said l, interrupt