Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1892-03-13

United States as commissioner, and
when he gets back in his special car to
Washington 1t is safe to say that over
all that great mileage of road not sar-
dine can or an empty beer bottle is left
to offend the eye. He is one OF the
most careful and painstaking railway
commissioners that we have ever had.
Some charge him with being over nice
about his railroads and too finnicky and
pernickety about always having the
road bed made up with the head to-
ward the engine, but he is careful and
conscientious man and mis- heart is in
the work.
Judge Humphrey lives here also. l
do not lay down any rules of conduct for
my boys at home. just in a general
way tell them 10 be like Judge hum
pnrey. The man who goes into Wis
consin and criticises Judge Humphrey
is generally arrested on suspicion and
held till they find out what his record is.
1t was a. Hudson that we used to bet
on the date when navigation would open
in the spring. There were no railroads
then. When the first boat whistled in
the spring people left their business,
and sometimes broke off in the midst OF
an eloquent prayer-full of statistics
and timely gossip and mere mention,
news summary, baseball news aud
household hints-iu order to run down
to The landing TO see the first boat come
in.
Messrs. Coon & Platt kept grain
warehouse then on the landing, and one
day in winter they made bet on the
date when the first boat would come up
the river to Hudson. 1t consisted OF
pair OF fifteen dollar boots. One day In
early spring Zeph Patt was alone in the
warehouse, and he thought he would go
up in the cupola and with his glass take
a sQuint down the lake on the sly. tie
was fat man, and when he got up to
the top OF the stairs be found that he
had arrived there two or three minutes
ahead of his breath. Finally he secured
it. however, and hastily running his
binocular tube along the horizon be
saw, just below Catfish bar, the dark
smoke and gray steam OF the first boat.
1t meant pair of boots on him, or
rather on Coon at his expense. he
turned slightly pale, then he started up
town to find Coon and hedge; which he
did by paying him ten dollars. But he
smiled when he thought how he had
worked it.
But the boat did not succeed in get
ting up that day, nor for week alter
ward. She struck ice at Catfish bar and
had to stop there, so that Zeph lost his
ten dollars, to say nothing Of the cigars
and sarsaparilla which he bought for
those whose silence he so dearly priced.
Byron J. Price, the president OF the
Wisconsin Press Association, also lives
at Hudson. He had for many years q
checkered career as horticulturist
and pomologist. He tried TO grow the
watermelon, and succeeded very well,
but when the melons got ripe other
hands gathered them and other chlnS
than his were ba,hed in their cold,
sweet juice.
This made Byron hot, as we say In
America, and he worried over it and
came near backsliding at one time. He
tried planting bulldog in each hill,
but that only improved the quality OF
the melon and made them the more de-
sirable TO those whom he referred TO IN
his paper as "fends in human form"
One summer he said to himself: 81
will try it once more and see If ! can get
a good ripe watermelon for my own use.
lust this time. just ore melon that !
rose myself. II l fail | will try it 10
more forever" He knew pretty well
who took his melons. They did not de-
ny it. 1t was gang of footpads from
the high school, headed by Will Taylor
and Pagan Starr. They took the mel
ons not maliciously, but because cool,
ripe melon in the dark OF the moon had
been prescribed for them by their ply
stefan.
That year, however, Byron did not
tell any one of his scheme. He planted
the melons in the middle of his popcorn
patch. But he did not tell anybody. He
did not even put it in the Clear Lake
Herald, which has always been regard
ed as the best medium Of hushing mp
anything that you could pick out. Peo
nile who wished TO unburden their
minds OF any great secret, with the as
surance that it would co no further,
used to print it in the Clear Lake
Herald.