Juniata sentinel and Republican. [volume] (Mifflintown, Juniata County, Pa.) 1873-1955, 1892-07-20


Though, imputed everything bad to
places.
If l attempted to sit by my wife's
side to watch the business of the wood
butcher, her manner was su;h that l
only too gladly retired to the parlOr.
The kitchen was failure. The bed
room was only one remove from this,
apd the parlor was not exactly Para
disc, especially with Dalton'5 hamm r
ringing in my ears. NJ, the kitchen
was no longer the luxurious haven Of
all earthly blessings. Even Madeline
herself did not seem the angelic
personification of the days agOne.
Mr.. Jasper Dalton was effusively
polite. Mrs. Harrity never seemed
more consclentiously attentive to my
various wants when Mr.. Dalton was
absent, but on his SYSTEMATIC return she
was never from his presence Never
taking her eyes from his handsome face,
and more than once coming upon them
suddenly and UNEXPECTEDLY L found
their noses almost touching in her
minute inspection of his work.
Finally, our meals vera often eaten
in silence, silence more profound than
words. But she seemed so Infinitely
happy-3o charmingly interested-that
it almost drove me 10 distraction. One
day | ventured:
''YOu seem to like carpentry"
She nodded.
Ipaused, tnen from her quietly:
"YOU seem to like cook eryi"
l was too full for a reply. 1 seIZed
my hat, going out to the rap, rap, rap
OF that internal hammer, and coming
in to the same decentralization.
Suicide stared me In the face, o,
shades of Tom Hood! Shall-shall II
Fashioned SO slenderly-
l eSsayed TO see Mr. Dalton alone. l
could have seen the Cook forty times
had L so desired. But Mrs. Harrity
was so much attached to Ddlton's pres
ence that my effoIt5 were positively
unavaillng. Her attention to him re-
minded me of oar honeymoon. Or my
wife's very dear kindness to me before
the arrival of our new cook. l began
to scent something. AL and / rushed
precipltately TO the kitchen.
"Miss Madeline" l said vehemently,
flushed TO the ears, 81 must dispense
with your services at oucer'
She stared with those black eyes.
"And for the abruptness of my
treatment, here are double wagesl''
This was beastly. Yet 1 could not
bear it a moment longer. And 1t
seemed | could fly before the dilatoTy
eXpreSsman succeeded IN removing her
trunk, herself soon following.
Our supper was very inelegant. !
had prepared 1t myself in default OF a
cook.
This is my work, little wife," ]
said smotheredIv, gulping down a swal-
l,w of inky coffee, and wishing might
tumble down preclpice, or die OF
apoplexy.
",,uhe beginning" in that suave
way of hers. Guess I'd better turn
you into the kitchen, you'll soon be a
master cook"
"And you a master builder"
We ''swapped" faint smiles, as boys
say of jack-kntves, but We finished our
improvised supper in silence. For
silenca was golden.
The next noon when 1 returned from
lega! business, found Il smoking din
ner awaiting me on the tabl-, and my
lCJNO5 VI COOh PiCbbJ 90 q
pinE, flying around like butterfly, and
L failed to hear that hOrrid hammer.
What could it mean?
But was still further surprised al
the unique combination at table. My
wife sat opposite me. Madeline sat or
my left, and on my right, our friend ,
; Mr. Jdspar DdlLonl
looked at my wife in mute appeal.
My three companions smiled.
80 you don't catch on to the
mystery, Harry? as the gamirs say
My affirmation came modestly. How
much L would have relinquished from
all my mortal pleasures had L never
placed foot in that now abe
kitchen. But how came j to do II? \
very easy explanation can be presented
We were not long married. Can you
cOokr' L had said TO the newly made
Mrs. HarritY. And her very negative
answer had so impressed me that l won
dered why [ had not pondered that
before. since she had been "bred up
a spoiled child of the daddies of the
dollarocracy, and therefore didn't know
the first rudiments of cookery, not 6
syllable. the very natural result being
tnat mai I-of-ail-wurk must he enllste,
at once. Mary Ann remained with u:
precisely ten ever-to-be-remembereC
days. She couldn't cook cod
fish! And her face was not Cleo
patra's. / had the honor of hiring and
discharg.ng her. l still vIvidly remem-
Der the characteristics IF the look she
gave me But L could certainly endure
that bstter than her cooking. A widow
lady came next. l didn't blame Mr.
Dollyrimple for dying to be rid of hel
kitchen accomplishments. In fact
virtually believe her cooking k TILED him
Ughl l can feel her biscuits in ny
stomach now! We would have beer
glad to have given her diploma to b,
rid OF her presence, for the devil said
her art wasn't art, and the devil is
oftener right than many people suppose
We shed no tears at her departure, and
l ye, remember the faint smile III 4
| displayed Mrs. Harrlty IS pretty teeth a
the expression oyerspreading my face
"Ill go in the kitchen myselfp'
vociferatei and throwing off my coat
rolled up my ''cuffed'' sleeves and
metaphoricaIly fell into the flour barrel
leaving my legal business unattende &c
| ", uCoci 1i4IN my Olithb III a SuppDStu
murder cas-, with the self-assertior
that the murderer might go scot free
or hang until the IntricacieS of the cool
room should be solved. L had seer
mother cook in the old-fashioned way
And if things didn't look quite so vel
| they relished. II l wasn't cook &
the son Of a cook, 1 yet had it in m,
mind to give the new bride Kitchen
surprise. My potatoes did very well
although little bitter from th
fact that the kettle became sud
denly dry. Mrs. Harrity said m,
steak would make a good lhoe sole
Which l did not regard as an indi =
nifty, as we frequently interchanged oul
little nlOts. l hunted out an old cook
book, and proceeded to inspect it
contents. How simple 1t all seemed
So much of this, so much of that,