The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1892-12-08
AN OPTICAL DELUSION.

AN OPTICAL DELUSI0N.
Yes, sir; give it to you straight, or
I'm Chinaman. Foolin'? No, no;
I'm not. Pm not one to fool; I drove
q bobtail car too long for that! What
with the greenies that put their fares
into the kerosene lamp box, and the
crooks that try to get off without
paying at all, and the old gents with
principles that make the driver come
in and collect 'for their own good"
and the young ladies that will stop to
kiss each other on the platform and
the old ladies that are afraid to get
OF, and the boys that hitch behind,
and the old gents that are going to
write to the papers, and the folks
that want twenty dollar bills changed,
and the folks you run over, and the
wagons that run into you, tell you a.
bobtaii-car driver gets savage after
a. while and don't feel like foolin'.
WAS savage that day. There were
tGwo folks in the cara man and a
woman-and only one fare in the box.
I'D rung and I'd shouted, but neither
OF them attended to me. laid the
missing fare to the man, because OF
his looks. He was about as poverty
stricken as / ever saw. Not your
aaboring mans poverty. A laborer
out OF work never looks like that. 1t
WAS q tramp's rags that fellow wore,
and he had the hands OF a tramp, too.
Under their dirt, d tramp's hands are
like the hands OF a fine gentleman
came reason, he don't work. This
mans hands were clean, and his face
wasn't bad; but it was more likely he
Was trying to beat me out OF 5 cents
than the lady was. And if he was
tramp he had money enough about
him-they always have-and after I'd
done my best from outside stopped
the ear and went to attend him. The
minute got in saw-what seemed to
me sort OF queer I hadn't noticed be-
Sore-the lady was a Sister of Charity.
She wore q black bonnet and veil, and
q white thing underit around her fore
head and under her chin Her hands
were crossed in her lap. She was as
holy and pure to look at as if she'd
been an angel. Hooked at her and
then said TO the man:
Il want your fare!"
He looked at me-hungry eyes he
hsd-and says he:
81 paid 5 cents into your box. Isn't
that right, driver?" ~
"AlI right, if you did it," said I.
Then went down toward the lady.
It was nay duty, but found it hard
TO do. stood before her, feeling as
queer as ever I did in my life, and all
Icould say was:
IMadam, shall take your fare?"
She did not answer me, but pointed
to paper somebody had left upon
the seat-a common newspaper.
''Give it to him." I seemed to see
he. Say with her lips-and by chm"
i saw she meant the tramp.
Now, q paper left IN the car belonged
60 me, and Pm a man with temper,
and at my wages the price OF a. paper
vas something; so what do you think
then, Of my going and handing that
paper over to the tramp, as meek as
Moses?
"Here," says I, poking it toward
him.
at isn't mine," says he.
But my eyes were on the sister all
the while.
t"rhe lady says you must take it "
says I. .....
Now, she hadn't said anything. She
had only lifted her hand.
What lady?" says the man, taking
che paper. -. ...
f"The sister there" says I.
Then all of a sudden, while looked
at her, the seat the lady had been
sitting on was empty! She hadn't got
upon her fleet or moved. She Just
wasn't there any more.
lgot out to my horses again az
quick as l could. Men do go out Of
their heads from overwork, Pm told
and began to think was going out
of mine. l did not dare to look into
the car until the man inside pulled
back the slide and spoke:
"Driver, give me your name anc
residence" he says. .. ....-
''What for?" says.
mo HARM" says he.
"Do you mean to get me into
trouble" l asked, knowing that there
were spoilers about, and making vi
my mind that this was onein disguise
81 tried my best to get that lady,
fare, but could not be hard on q sis
tor"
II saw no lady. What do l car
about faresS If you give me you
name you won't be sorry, I think"
he spoke like a gentleman, for al
his clothes.
ooh, we'll, I'm not ashamed Of m,
nan,e-it's Jim Brown. This car i
No, and if you want me you cal
find me-" "
"All right" he said, and saw tina
he had folded the paper square an
WAS fastening itup in his coat, pinuin
at With black-headed pin.
AZ tiie next corner he got off.
NhA' night ! went to DR.. as kin