davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
WIT AND HUMOR.

MT. hOOpS-NOW MOSG, HOW OIu you
come to kill that bird7
Mose-Dat's jes' wat Use comm to
'splain' Marse Hoops. I done kill dat
chicken in sci -defence.
Mr.. Koops-Oh, look here, Nose! A
little chicken wouldn't hurt you.
Mose-Ya as; OATS wat I thought.
Mamma-Are you getting along
nicely at school now, Jonnie2
Jonnie-Yes, indeed, Mamma! l
have the best position in my class.
Mamma-Yes? What is that?
Jonnie-Near the stove.
Col. Blood, of Kentucky-Do you
know, Colonel, I actually saw snakes
last night.
Col. Gore, same state-What kind of
snakes were they, Colonel?
They seemed water snakes, Colonel.
Colonel, I'm afraid you're diluting
your whiskey.
When George asked you to be his
wife, inquired the mother. wasn't he a
great deal fustered and confused7
Yes, mamma, replied Laura, looking
admiringIy at something that sparkled
on her finger, but what he said had
the right ring about it.
When a man makes a large fortune
what do people say, asked the teacher?
That he was fortunate, replied the
bright boy.
That's right. Now, when a man fails
i'll business what do they say?
That he didn't advertise.
Dashaway Ito little Willie Slimson)
When your sister comes down and
is comfortably seated on the sofa with
me, 1 want you to tiptoe in softly, and
tHrn the gas down low.
Wilie-You're too late. Sister just
told me to come in and turn it out.
Father say, Fred, why don't you
make love to that pretty Miss st. Cyr1
Son-I don't like her, papa. She
said I was green, don't you know.
Father (commiserating)-Well, well,
my boy, you can't say she was color
blind, can you?
Col. Yerger-You understand that
you must not say anything to my wife
obou5 my coming home late.
Sam Johnsing-No sab, I under
stands. So de saying is: Silence is
gold.
He got a five dollar gold piece.
Brown-It is said that God never
made two men alike.
Mrs. Brown-Of course he didn't, OF
you would never hear of a woman be
ing married twice.
Magician Dellinger, to the little boy
do you think I could put the twenty
cent piece which the lady holds, into
your coat pocket"
Nav l know you can't
Why notT
Case it's all torn out.
Western Belle-Here, paw, I have
borrowed Mr.. Tenderfoot's % calibre
revolver.
Paw-What We doin' with that toy,
Western Belief want you TO pierce
my ears SOS I kin e the errings
Howling Hank gave me.
Mrs. Uppstarte-Is this the termin
of the road 2
Polite Passenger-No. madame, only
one of them.
Lover-What has my little ange
been doing today
His Little Angel have been learn
ing to cook. Chat ought to fetch him
she said, as she noted with pleasure
his increasing nervOusness.)
Tom-Smart fellow, that Smith. H
can talk an hour and say absolutel!
nothing.
Jack-Then he must be a society lion
IT, 7 -
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
NOTICE.

Parties inviting any of the officers of
the Alliance to make an address, are
expected to pay expenses of the same.
The State Alliance cannot pay the ex-
penses of any n except when doing
regular work. The brethren will please
note this and arrange matters accord
ingly. w: S. BARNES,
Sec'y-Treas. N. @. f. s. A.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
NOTICE.

Any County or Sub Alliance wishing
to employ a good lecturer, who has
no superior in the State can do so by
writing to me. The expenses and a
small compensation for services will
have to be paid.
F~raternally,
W. S. BARNES,
Sec'y-Treas. N. @. +. S. A.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
NOTICE.

All communications intended for the
Executive Committee of the State ALI
ance of North Carolina should be ad-
dressed to Capt. S. B. Alexander, Chair
man, Raleigh, N. c., care of w. s..
Barnes, Secretary-Treasurer
By order Of Executive Committee.
w. S. BARNES,
Sec'y-Treas. N. O. f. S. A.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
ANXIOUS To CLOSE UP.

Ho8tess-Won't you sing something,
Mr.. Greene?
Mr.. G.-There are so many strangers
here L
Hostess Never mind them; they'll
be gone before you get half through
ETchohge.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
-M1N1sTRATo NOTICE.

Having qualified as the Administrative of the
late L. L. Polk, l hereby notify all persons in
debted to his estate to make prompt settlement,
and all persons having claims against the estate
to present the same for settlement on OF before
tn 25th day of June, 1898, or this notice may be
plead in bar OF their recovery
R SARAH p. POLK.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09

For Malaria, Liver Trou-
bic, use
BROWN IRON BITTERS
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
or
German Clover.
(IL0 called Scarlet CZs1er }

(4hO called Scarlet Czsgrr.)
5 Amore valuable crop than this
does not exist. AS an improver
of the soil, or for an early sum
mer forage or hay crop it is I'M
surpassed. AS a green manur-
ing crop for GRAIN, CoTToN or
TRUCKING CROPS, it gives the
very best results; while for i'm
proving poor land it has no
equal. First introduced in Vir-
ginia fifteen years ago, since
which time its growth has rapidly
extended until now it is largely
grown in nearly every State in
the Union.
Circulars giving full information
free. Price of New Crop Seed, 50
per bushel of 90 lbs. !,
I. W. Wood & S0ns,I
Seedsmen, Richmond, Va.
Fall Circular giving full information on all Seeds for
Fail sowing, ready August I5rh. Mailed
free. Send for it.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
The Rice Mills

Of Port Mystery. By B. F. Houston
A romance of the twentieth century,
embodying the most telling arguments
against a protective tariff that has ap
Peared in many a day. Paper. so cents,
1t is a strong showing for free trade, and any
one desiring to get posted and Crammed with gOoa
arguments should read it-DetyO1 NezDs.
Send your orders to THE PROGRESSIVE
FARMER, Raleigh, n. @.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09

By LESTER Z. HUBBARD. 400 pages o.
new facts and congratulations in Amer
lean politics. Radical yet constructive.
An abundant supply Of new ammunition
for the great reform movement. The
textbook for the Presidential campaign
of 1892. Paper, SO cents.
1t is an exceedingly able and valuable book, and
should be in the hand of every voter in the United
States. 1t breaches a mighty sermon. -LgHati~
D0nNeAH.
The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-08-09
ANNOUNCEMENT

Sec. Treas. N. @. F. S.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
FAVOR LESS WORK.
The State Eight-Hour League
Meets and Discusses
Plans.
A Vigorous Agitation to Be
Conducted in the Coun-
try.
Judge Macdonald Delivers a
Pertinent and Instruct
i've Address.
Crusaders Urged to Acquaint
Themselves on Questions
Of the Day.

at the regular monthly meeting of
the State Eight Hour League, held at
Labor hall yesterday, committee con-
sisting of E. e. Ives. j. III. Fyten, J.
Schick, of st. Paul; o. ID. Clark and A.
Schaible, of Minneapolis, was appointed
to formulate plans and make prepare
tons for mass meetings to be held May
in several cities of the state. 1t is in
tended that these meetings shall be
the most successful ever held in
the state in the line of agita-
ton for shorter hours. j. Ryan. j. d.
Coughlin, Harry Franklin, of st. Paul;
L. Lawrence, III. S. Holcomb and
Thomas Dwyer, of Minneapolis. were
appointed committee to visit the or
CARNATIONS of the Twin Cities in behalf
of the league work.
Officers for the ensuing year were
elected as follows:
President, Louis Nash. St Paul: first vice
president, A. Schaible, Minneapolis; second
vice president, j. j. Murphy, St Paul; sec
rotary, j. w. Cole, st. Paul; treasurer, E. c.
Ives, St.Paul.
A report from the committee to con-
Ter with the Farmers Alliance conven-
ton showed that there had been ineor-
porated in their platform an mdorse-
ment OF the eight movement, and
pledge to purchase and use union
made goods. If the Alliance members
live up to these public uttrrances, it is
expected that great good will result to
the various unions OF the state,
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
Use of Dumb Bells.

The use of dumb bells is now common
with society women who have time and
inclination for physical culture, says the
New York Press. In lieu of exercise
she has hitherto given herself up boldly
to the massage operation. This brought
all her muscles into play without a
particle of self effort, but it did not cut
tivate for her the erect position produced
by the use of dumb bells. And now that
slenderness of waist, sloping hip and
well developed bust count as small mat
tiers compared to pretty dimpIed back,
the dumb bells come into vogue-the
one thing whose use will straighten up
the figure and hollow the pretty dimpleS
in the shoulder. Actresses are all
gone on this back display, and just
how big salaries are offered for the
woman who can wear her dress all cut
out at the spinal column. In this con-
nection it is interesting to note that
Mrs. Langtry is very fond of athletics.
Her hobby is the dueling sword, but she
goes in for physical development with
all sorts of gymnastic and athletic APP
planes, and is not a poor hand with
the mountain staff and the rod and gun.
She is not an expert rider or driver, but
loves horses, and is not altogether a
stranger to the saddle and carriage seat
She says that athletic and gvnnastic
exercise develops the figure and imparts
a grace and supplenesS of movement.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
QUESTIONS OF THE DAY.
Patriotic Advice by Hon. j. L
Macdonald to the Crusaders.

MacuOnafu TO the Crusaders.
Avery large audience greeted Judge
Macdonald yesterday afternoon at Cru
saderS' hall, he having been announced
tospeak there. He opened by speaking
of the great CAFE which should be exer-
eised by all in casting the all-powerful
ballot. In order to do this properly it is
necessary to look closely into every sub
ject that is likely to be brought into
each political campaign. We should
endeavor to make ourselves we'll enough
acquainted with these questions to be
able to know whether or not the dis
cusslon, when 1t. comes. is full. In
this way only can we hope 10
draw our own conclusions. In
many instances politicians are allowed
to draw all the conclusions. He took I'D
the Farmers Alliance, and said that the
TACT that so many meu are so deeply in
tereSted in it should cause us to make a
careful examination of their claims.
The demand of that body that the gov
eminent assume control of. all the rail
roads in the country may be made an
issue before long, and we should he pre-
pared to vote lntelligently on the mat
ter should we ever be called upon to do
so. The next question discussed was
the proposal made by many of eleeting
United States senators and the presi-
dent by direct vote of the people. He
gave few of the more important rea-
sons which have been adduced i'll sup
port of the movement, with the
objections set up by those who
oppose the change. Following this
came the question of prohibition. We
may have to vote OH it before long.
Next came the trouble with England in
the Behrlng sea fisheries. The conten-
ton of the English was set forth, as
well as the reasons why this country
takes issue with her. He said that the
tariff question had been so much dis
cussed that he would pass it by; and he
proceeded to the silver problem. A
plain and full statement of the position
OF the supporters of and opponents to
the free coinage of silver was made,
with brief history of legislation on
that subject in this country down to
the present time.
In none of the subjects discussed was
the least effort made to influence his
hearers to vote OH one side or the other.
The question was simply put in such
form as to excite curiosity and encOur-
age investigation. Altogether it was
considered one of the most useful adj,
dresses ever delivered in the hall.
j. X. O'Reilly, president of the RAM.
sey county societies, delivered a short
address, setting forth the advantages OF
the society. Very choice vocal and in
strumental music was provided by
Messrs. George Danes, F. J. Ellis and
T., n. Smith.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
At the Hotels.

Cliff Ryland and others, of the After
Dark company, are at the Clifton.
Sidney Clarke, cashierof the First National
bank, Grand Forks. \. D., is at the Clifton.
G. E. Trip, of Chicago, and Charles B.
Nichols of Duluth, were among the arrivals
at the Aberdeen yesterday.
Ex-Gov. Barto. of Sank Center, is at the
Windsor. He is in the city to attend j meet
Ing of the Grand lodge of Masons Wednes-
day.
At the Clifton-E. G. Harris, Eau Claire,
Wis; j. E. Bennett and Thomas Cassidy,
Pipestone City. Mimi; Jerry Murphy, New
York: James NJ. Ward, Boston; James Kelly,
Chicago; John Sweeny, Philadelphia.
At the Sherman-James O'Brieu, Mile
Lacs; NJ. Gawee city; u. A. Grover. Horace,
s. Hortop, Millbank; Miss Emma Crisp
shank, Brainerd; j. E. LOWING. Miles CITY.
At the Ryan,. NJ. Rubenstein. Chicago;
ID. c. Bunten, Duluth: W. McVeigh, New
York; Alex q. Giassford. Chicago: II. c.
Brooks. I. 5. A, Newark, Del; ". II. Ham
ilton. New York; q. 6. Phillips, Chicago;
Arthur Atkinson. Winnipeg; j. y. jackson /;
Chicago; George Dotterer, Philadelphia Pa. 4;
W. q. Edwards, j. A Jackson and George z.
Crossley, Chicago.
tonna: P. II. Friend, AUSTIN John Meyers,
Duluth; j Renken. Sheldon, To-; b. BAN
berg. New York; +. b. Slocum. Chicago
Hans Gunderson, Ishpenning, Mich. Z. r.
WING, winnipeg. Z. IL 4taad, butte, mont. ;
Z. W. Dent Omaha; \. Shaw. Eau Claire
+. F. Skinner. Toronto; Harvey Brown,
Chicago; George NJ. Laing, Windom; Will
lam Lee, Boston; Edwin Shedler, Cincinnati
John P. Bray, Grand Forks n. D.; L. V.
Hubbard, Red Wing; r. b Knapp. Portland
Or. d. A. Bailey, Fargo; Charles Gordon.
Great Falls, Mont. j. o. Shoemaker, Helena
X. n. futile, aandan, \. ID.
Deposits made at The State Savings
ri, ~
titled to five months interest July l,
1892
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
Seibert's Concert.

The concert given by Seibert's orches-
ira yesterday afternoon at Turner hall
was well attended. Among the audience
were noticed the members of the Bos-
tonians' orchestra, who, as heretofore,
attended these concerts when i'll ST.
Paul. d. Muhleubrueh delighted all
with his violin solo. "Fantaisie Caprice"
which WAS given in the most finished
style. After repeated applause MI.
Muhlenbrueh played Carnival de
Venice" with variations of his own. in
which he displayed fine execution and
technique. Mr.. Wurz's oboe solo Ave
Maria" and gavotte likewise surprised
and pleased the audience. Mr.. Wurz
proved to be a thorough master upon his
instrument, playing with great skill and
feeling. The orchestra was particularly
good in the overture ''Pique Dame" by
Suppe. The Scotch PATROL" Merry
Monarch" and "Leonore March," by
Raft, were all we'll given and greatly APP
plauded. '-Czardas." by Keler+Bela,
closed a very interesting ana entertain
ing programme. The concert next Sun
day will be at Martins hall.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
Women Who Vote.

Wyoming's state constitution grants
women the unconditional right of stuff
rage and Office holding. Fhe Isle of
Man and Iceland are said to accord her
the same right. But several states per
nit women to vote for school, offers.
The question of women's municipal
suffrage IS at present attracting atten-
ton i'll Denmark. A bill has been in
troduced in the Danish second chamber
that unmarried women twenty-five
years of age who pay taxes should have
municipal suffrage Fhe Copenhagen
Female Suffrage society held largely
attended meeting to discuss the bill,
when Fru BergNeilson maintained
that it did not go far enough. 1t ought
also to include married women. Several
well-known men spoke in support of
the bill as small step in the right di-
rection, and resolution praying the
government to comply with their wishes
was passed. Mrs. Fawcett. speaking at
Birmingham in support of the claim for
woman suffrage, stated that not only
were there $4,000 female landowners in
England and Wales, but 10000 women
were actually engaged in farming on
their own account.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
BEGGARs NEAR BRIDGE.
Two Well Dressed Young Me-
Who Told a Touching Story.

Two Well Dressed Young Men
Who Told a Touching Story.
Two we'll blessed young men, one APP
parently about twenty and the other
about eighteen years old. stood at the
New York entrance of the bridge Sgtur-
day night begging. Many persons who
were stopped answered the appeal with
a quarter or half dollar, says the New
York Advertiser.
The two youths stood together near
the curbstone, apparently detected and
dOwneaSt. Every few minutes, as some
particularly klnd-faced man would aD-
proach, the oldest of the two would take
a step or two forward. intercept him,
and in 4 tone of mingled pride and
humiliation ask for help.
My brother aud [ are dead broke"
he would say. ''We got here last
Thursday. coming from Scranton, Pa,
where we have been living with our
grandmother. The old lady hasn't any
too much money for herself, and we got
tired living off her, so we came to New
York to get work"
, Such talk was new thing for beg
CARS, and, coupled with the tone, the
evident responsibility, and the dress of
the young men, made the one appealed
10 stop, lOOk SHARPLY DIT TIC speaker anu
ask questions, while the younger of the
two walked directly away few steps,
as though ashamed to hear his brothers
confession of poverty.
.What made you come here with so
little money!" was asked of the suppli-
cant.
sWe brought ali we had. We have
never been here before, and thought we
could get work. We haven't succeeded
yet, though. and now we haven't
enough for lodging.
1--WE don't look as though we would
ASH for help if we didn't need 1t, do we?
Tie fact of the matter is we are
ashamed to live off our relatives any
more, and wanted to start for ourselves.
You'd have done the same thing, sir, if
You had been in our place."
Such talk could have only one result
a hand would go into pocket anu
come out with good sized coin, which
was left with the two young men wi o
came from Scranton, Pa, and Il g
giver resumed his homeward way.
And every one who donated a quarter
to those higb-minded, noble boys won
dered if their story was true, or wheth-
er that and the good clothes was the
latest device of clever beggars with
which to make good, easy living.
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11

pation Into that brief hour he tried to
compress all the fun that other small
boys spread over the whole twenty-four.
1t was celebrating to watch him enjoy
himself.
when the baby's bigger" Robbie
told me one day, 'then I'll go to school
| m learn to count, like Bert; m I'll have
coat with pockets, like JOS; m Pll sell
papers m make some money same as
Fred does. But | hat to stay at home
m tend the baby how, cos mothers too
busy. After the baby's bigger Pll get
to go m play all Saturdays. IN Pm go'n
to buy me hat like Bert's. Oh, Pill
have lots of fun after the baby's big
gerw
But one afternoon while the baby
took his nap Robbie failed to devote
himself to enjoyment with his usual
fervor. i saw him sitting on the porch
steps all alone, with wrinkled brow
and eyes fixed upon the ground.
whats the matter, Robble?" asked.
"Why aren't you playing?"
| "Oh-cos."
Are you sick?"
| Nome"
'Have you been bad?"
/ 'sNOme.''
''Come, tell me what's the trouble"
1lOUulc IOSo SlOWlys SILL IIOWuiDB,
and thrust his hands deep into his
kickerb0ckers-he had no pockets, poor
boy! AS he approached me could see
| that he was trying hard not to cry.
Say" said he at last. with great
solemnity, do you love God? Mother
does"
Everyone loves God, Robbie. except
wicked people and the heathen."
Whats heatheu%'
L explained.
''Do you. think Gods smart?' His
eyes were fixed on the ground as he
asked.
why, Robbie?"
He looked up, with desperation on
his face.
We'll, Idon't' he explained. ''Guess
I'll hat to go m be a heather. Gods
sent us another baby-'n Pm Disguised
with HimI"
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
SAINT PAUL.
SIFTINGS.

The Bodega- on sixth street, was closed
yesterday.
The committee on claims of the assembly
meets this afternoon at2:30 o'clock.
Bishop Gilbert conducted the service last
evening at st. Peters church. Dayton's bluff.
The board of control holds regular meet
ing today al O'Clock i'll the office at the city
hall.
a number of police officers are laid off
from duty owing 10 severe attacks of lnfu-
enza.
The board of public works holds regular
meeting today IN the office in the city hail
and court house.
Archbishop W. H. Gross of Portland, Or,
occupied the pulpit yesterday morning at
the Assumption church.
The conference committee holds its first
regular meeting tor 1S92 this evening III the
council chamber at o'clock.
The Sisters OF the Good Shepherd desire TO
inform their patrons that they are now pre-
pared to receive orders for fine sewing and
laundry work at No. 80 Eudicott Arcade.
The assembly will meet in regular session
tomorrow evening at 7:30 clock. The bids
for building the new auditorium will be
opened, and the various contracts awarded.
The question OF providing increased facili-
ties for the protection of the wholesale dis
trict will be discussed this evening at the
meeting of the board of fire commissioners.
a special committee has the matter in charge,
and will submit report to the board
The two-story frame residence of William
Drussell 646 Randolph street. waS damaged
by fire last evening TO the extent of Sl50. But
for the prompt arrival OF the fire department
the house would have been totally destroyed.
The damage is covered by insurance.
The regular monthly meeting OF the Junior
Pioneers takes place tuesday evening of this
week. Final ARRANGEMENTS for the annual
bali on Jan. % VIII be completed and reports
received from ali special and standing COM
mitteeS 4 large attendance IS anticipated.
The board OF park commissioners Will
meet in the city clerk ; Office at , o clock this
afternoon and drive out to Como park for
the purpose OF inspecting the argciian well,
which, it is hoped, viii give sufficient sup
ply of water TO ill up the lake ana maintain
The former level
St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-01-11
The Girl ut Home

These sentiments by writer in Kate
Fields Washington are worth thinking
about: Every one must know some
home where a diligent cultivation OF the
amenities dates from the every day
when the newly graduated daughter
and her newly polished piano made
their appearance. They bring with
them a little breeze of change and prog
resS which. on the whole, makes de-
eidedly for cultivation. The culture of
this ornamentaIly useful maiden is not
usually of the highest type, but it is al
most always an effort toward a home
lite marked by greater dignity, broader
hospitality and more careful attention
to those details which make an old and
finished society differ from settlement
of pioneers. When was in college we
had phrase which we used to describe
any young woman who had not con-
fessed lodgings for career. We spoke
of her as simply aiming to make home
happy The phrase was ironical at
first, but think we used It until it lost
this faint, and meant to u S that the do
mestic side of life had its triumph, and
was worth deliberately choosing az
destiny. 1t was an admission that the
girl who meant to go home and stay
there need not apologize for her course
Alas, that things have come to such a
pass that this IS now almost impera-
lively demanded"