davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

SINCE the ladies have appropriated
the "galluses" of men and defantly
wear them outside of their raiment,
for ornament instead of use, why
shouldn't old maids initiate the old
bachelors and fasten them up with
an artistic-looking ten-penny nail?
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

OF all strikes the sympathetic
strike" is the silliest and most indie
feasible. 1t is much as if a man
should feel obliged to cut off a hand
in order to show his sympathy with a
neighbor who had met with the same
misfortune.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

boudoir, in banquet hall or public prom
enade, than the feeling that we are well
and correctly dressed. II gives US that
delightful courage which loosens the
tongue, sets wit flowing, and warns
every corner OF the soul. A we'll known
lady OF fashion once assured me that
she Immediately became low-spifited IL
there was a wrinkle in the fit OF her
gloves, and a clubman of my acquaint-
ance protests that he can't enjoy him
self at any social reunion unless he
knows that he has two handkerchiefs In
his pockets.
AZ the summer resorts this season 1
have noticed a great many charming
dresses worn by ladies no longer young
ladies who, like Nell Gwynne, seem
resolved ito grow fat and look young
till 40, and then slip out OF the world
with the first wrinkle" In many cases
they were delaines-not the delaines Of
thirty years ago, but the exquisite It's
sues of the looms of to-day. Sometimes
black figured with heliotrope and
trimmed with black lace and heliotrope
ribbons; at others, gray delaine with
black and white figures, or brown with
amber or dull rose set of with ribbon
and trimmed with gathered frills. 5. faf
The season Is now too far advanced
for the introduction of any novelties,
The summer girl must be content with
the picturesque effects which she, eau
attain by the use of wide-folded sashes,
Swiss belts and deep corselets. 1t is
usual to have the sash or corselet match
the skirt. The wise maiden will be
careful how she wears blouse finished
in sailor style with singlet. Only
very shapely and smooth white neck can
stand such a garment. She had better
make choice OF a style less trying; say.
coyselet belt and collar to match, COW
cred with lace. For instance, take the
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
A Ternperance WORKER.

Mrs. Josephine Batchen, of Ashe-
vile, N. G., has travelled is, 900 miles
and spoken 300 times in one year for
temperance and Sunday school inter
ests. She also wrote leaflets and
distributed thousands OF them
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
Ned and Billy.

We had a pet lamb named Billy,
who had the range OF our lawns. He
would leave the most delicious clover
to get the soft hand Of Ned on his
head. They would walk of togeth-
er, talking as If they understood each
other thoroughly. At any rate Billy
resented the least meddling with
Ned, but would lay his hard head on
the boys knees, and look up into his
face with world Of affection. /
have seen them stretched on the
gress together, with Ned's head on
his friends woolly sides.-Mary e.
Spencer, in st. Louis Globe-Dem-
Ocrat. .
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

In the death of Rose Terry Cooke,
American literature has lost an au-
thor whose simplicity was her great
est charm. Her pen-pictures of
rural life in New England will never
be forgotten.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

A YELLOW substance resembling
sulphur has made its appearance in
the water at the head OF Lake Supe-
rior. 1t is about time for Duluth
and West Superior to repent
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

PINKERToN's standing army might
Just as we'll be disbanded. 1t is not
popular American institution. No
body arises to defend it, and its
manned veterans will get no PEN
81 nns
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
m Were You, NV Boy.

wouldn't be ashamed to do right
anywhere. would not do anything
that would not be willing for every
body to know.
l wouldn't conclude that I knew
more than my father before 1 had
been fifty miles from home.
l wouldn't go into the company Of
boys who use bad language.
F.. l wouldn't get in the sulks and pout
whenever l couldn't have my own
way about anything.
l wouldn't let any other boys get
ahead of me in my studies.
l wouldn't abuse little boys who
had no big brother for me to be afraid
of.
Iwould learn to be polite to every
body.
l wouldn't cry for anything when
mamma or papa told me it was not
good for me.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

LOOKING BACK ON n.
Strawber-HIow do you feel, old man,
now that you have been engaged a
couple Of monthsl
singerly (savaQely)-I feel as though
might have got cheaper ring.
FAST YOUNG NAN.
It---Gwacious me, Hoffy, whatevah's
the mattah with youah clockf Wun
downl
The Other-N-a-w; Lunnon time
Puck.
WHAT HE WAS GOING TO DO.
81 don't know what on earth I'm GO
ing-to do" said Harkins.. my income
is IS, 900 and my expenses $40, 900.
"You are going to bust" said Hicks.
HIS OPINION.
'sWhat did you think of my bookf"
inquired the author of the critic.
"Oh,I thought great deal of II" was
the prompt reply, and the critic passed
on to prevent an expression of the nature
of his thought. 81 Detroit Free Press.
YIELDED FIRST.
Briggs-Spriggins had hard time the
other day. He put a porous plaster on
his chest and thought he would try to
get it off by getting down on the carpet
and rubbing himself back and forth.
Griggs-Did he succeed
Briggs-No. The carpet came up.
WHAT WORKED 1T.
Seedy Customer (at entrance of base
ball park)-I have always had curiosity
to know something about the mechanism
of turnstilc. On what principles does
it workl
Cat ,keepcr-Cash every time. Step
aside, my friend. You are hindering the
procession Chicago Tribune.
NOTHING AS TERRIBLE.
There are many ills that wait us as we
journey on through life,
And dangers that beset us, midst its tur-
moil and its strife;
But there is no greater danger in the
earth, the sky or air
Than woman with a sunshade in
crowded thoroughfare.
= New York Press.
WATER DEPREssEs 1T.
'NIilk is very sensitive fluid" said
Smithers.
Every. Seems to have some sense oil
honor, too" said Hicks. 'Tt gets so blue
when 1t is watered."
THE WISDOM OF EXPERIENCE.
Old Doctor-No, sir. never have
patient die on my hands-never.
Young Doctor-How do you manage
it?
Old Doctor-When / find man is go
to die l get him to call specialist.
Life.
DIFFERENT CIRCUMSTANCES.
Tommy-Said you could lick me with
one hand tied behind you, didn't youi
Let's see you do it!
Jimmy-Y-ycs, guess l did say so;
but amt got one hand tied behind me
just now indianapolis Journal.
HAPPY YOUTH.
How happy is the youth who knows
When it is time to jog,
And just in time doth get the gate
Between him and the dog.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

the degenerate offspring Of the pictur-
esque brace of the old world, and stands
as proof that the wonderful creature.
man himself. has lost mis- broad shout
ders and must now cross his braces to
keep them from slipping down. Like
everything else which the girl has
taken from the male toilet, she has
touched 1t only TO beautify It.
The third illustration shows a charm
Ing calling costume In pink silk or
crepon, with guipure pIastron, having
the form of yoke. front and back.
The crossed ribbons meet at a point at
the back. There Is a ribbon bracelet
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

THE poet who wants "the sweep Of
the wild, wet weather" needs only
patience. He will get it some day
when his umbrella is missing. Why
are poets so impatient?
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

TRAIN robbers in Indian Territory
are now quoted at 50, 600 each, with
demand for the convicted article
much greater than the supply.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
The Season Ear Advanced
New York corresDoudence

GOD birth and good
manners can't make
a fine lady, let them
try ever 80 hard, for
the simple reason that
the charm OF person.
allty IL based. upon
sureness of self. The
crown m a Ike s t Q
queen as the gown
does the lady. Byron
hit the nail on the
head when he used
the expression "dar-
ing In full Dress" for
nothing stays us bet
ter In ballroom or
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

IT's only in the order OF events that
when his best girl shakes a fellow
he's ratified.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

JEsTs AND YARNS BY FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.

HooI<ed-The Philosophers stone-She
Was Little Prcvious-No Question
About the Breed, &C., &c.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
LITTLE BOYS AND GIRLS.


Quaint Sayings and DoinEs 81 Little Ones.
Gathered and Printed Here for Other
little Folks 20 Read
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
Youths Mt the worlds Fair.

Provision has been made for the
holding In Chicago at the time OF the
Worlds Fair, OF congress composed
OF youths of all nations OF the world.
Delegates will be sent, it is expected,
from England, Japan, France, Ger.
many, Norway, Sweden, Spain, Aus.
tria, Italy, Russia, and countries Of
the Orient. These young men are to.
be selected from the high schools and
the grammar-school grades. Their
ages are to range between 13 and 20
years. No Worlds Fair congress that,
has been thus far arranged for. it.
is thought, will excite more interest
than this project. The pith of the
argument for such congress is en-
braced in the following paragraph
from the preliminary address:
1T is felt that carefully selected
assembly Of the young from all ma
tions under such remarkable condi-
tions as will prevail during the
Columbian Exposition, cannot fail TO
powerfully aid this high end. 1t is
purposed to draw together the
worthiest and the most talented
youth Of all lands, the coming lead.
ers Of mankind, that they may be
led to realize, as could not otherwise
be possible, the meaning and the
worth Of the fellowship of nations.
and the brotherhood Of man. In
gathering so constituted there would
certainly be some who will be called
to deal decisively with the destinies
of states and the serious concerns of
millions of men. Brought thus to-
gether, and face to face with the
larger relations Of our independent
humanity, those fresh minds would
greatly gain in fitness for the impor-
tant tasks decreed TO their future.
Among them would be many who
will survive all who are now active
on the stage Of the worlds affairs,
and who would therefore stand be-
fore the generation to follow us as
witnesses of the humanizing power of
the Worlds Exposition OF 1893, and
be inspired by its influence to higher
and more useful careers, making the
fulfiilment Of its great promises their
noblest claim to history"
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

The exports of mineral-oils during Juue
were Of the vafue Of s., ,7ei; in June. 1891,
t4.O39. 516.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

Cold natures have only recollec-
tions; tender natures have remem-
brances.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

STRIKES are mistakes. The results
show that with sorrowful distinct
ness.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

THERE Is nothing inconsistent in q
carpet dealer wearing claw-ham-
mer coat
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
NO NEW NOVELTIES.
roo LATE NOW TO INTRODUCE
THEM.

In Addition TO Good Birth and Good Man
ners = Fine Lady Must ne Well Dressed
The Gown Makes the Lady as the
Crown Does the Queen. A
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

she-what would you do If you-were
RIGHT
He-Ask you to be my wife.
She-And should say Eyes" 1t is
better to be born lucky than rich.-
TPuck.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

Strawber-Ho do you feel, old man,
now that you have been engaged q
couple Of monthsl
Singerly (savagely)-I feel as though !
might have got cheaper ring.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
rnr rnnosornrR,s STONE.

Wiggins--Old Good felloseems to take
the world very philosophically.
Hardup-Well, you see, he can afford
to wear diamonds. Truth.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
A FAST YOUNG NAN.

It--Gwacious me, Hoffy, whatevah's
the mattah with youah clockf Wun
down.
The Other-N-a-w; Lunnon time
PUCK.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18

PERU continues to.have trouble Of
its own, and a new cabinet. has been,
foamed.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
SHE WAS A LITTLE PREVIOUS.

She was a woman whose clothes were
better than her manners. She walked
into the railway car, tilted her head
superciliously and shifted once or twice
as she asked:
'Is this the smoking carr"
'No," replied demure young woman
in the first seat, sit isn't. think you'll
find the smoking car three cars forward. u
Il Washington Star.
NO QUESTION ABOUT THE BREED.
eff understand you, " said the lawyer
to the man who called to consult him,
''your COW was thrown from the track al
q street crossing by locomotive on the
X. Y. and z. road, and you want to
bring suit against the company for dam
agesG"
eyes, that's right"
The lawyer made memorandum.
valuable animal, presumed"
"Purty good COW. Hadn't no bad
tricks. Good mixer"
"What breed"
81 don't know?
"You don't know2 Was she badly in
jured?"
Badly injured! Why, she was killed
deader'n mackerel!"
"And buried9"
Course
"Why didn't you say so2" exclaimed
the attorney, impatiently. "There's only
one breed of cattle in cases of this kind y
And he made another memorandum
Breed, Jersey. Value, $15O.--[Chicagc
Daily Tribune"
AS 1T LOOKED TO HIM.
"She wears her decoration rather easily,
don't you think?" queried Caraway, as
the newly-made Duchess came down the
aisle with the Duke, gentleman of re-
duced stature and fortunes, but propi-
tious pedigree.
Decoration" repeated Hooks, "what
decoration9"
81 refer" Caraway explained, ''to the
chaplet on her arm."-[ Harlem Life.
STRIKING SIMILARITY.
Bykes-Why do the hands of clock
remind you of pouting husband and
wife,
Sykes-Give it up.
DyhOs Whys DcCausc IHcy pdSS each
other dozen times day without speak
ing Jewellers Weekly.
NATTER OF PRESSING IMPORTANCE.
Poet-I have here little poem which
/ would like to have go in as soon as
possible.
Editor-Goodness graciousl Here
right under the table-quick i-[Truth.
RIDDLES AND vIoLINs.
Boy-Is this instrument called fiddle
or a violin!
Professor-Ven blay it it's violin.
Ven you blay it it's fiddle.-[Good
News.
1T CHILLED HIM.
He saw her at Manhattan,
As with eaOer bird-like orace
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
THE COTTAGE by THE SEA.

It's been written up in story, it's been
sung in numbers sweet;
II has captivated thousands with its sym
metry complete
Like dream from the Atlantic it has
risen fair and free,
With its beauty-so romantic-has "The
Cottage by the Sea-"
But it's like dream-a vision-though
the poets sing 1t so;
1t might have been Elysian half hun
dred years ago;
But now it's full of business; when that
cottage you shall seek,
You'll find the sign up: "Boarders-
Twenty dollars by the weekl''
II Atlanta Constitution.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
ENJOYMENT DURING A SPEECH.


Mrs. Campaigner-Well, did the crowd
enjoy your speechl
Mr.. Campaigner (home from politi-
cal rally)-I guess they did They ought
to have enjoyed themselves. They all
went down stairs to take drink when 1
got up Chicago News-Record.
HE COULD TELL TIME.
First Passenger-Can you tell me the
timer
Second Passenger-Yes. Resumes
his NEUTRALITY-SUSPICIOUS. Circular.
SOOTHING CIGAR.
Gus De Smith-Whew!
Hostetter McGinnis-what's the mat
teri
"That cigar you are smoking. 1t
smells dreadful"
eyes, know it."
"You can't have any pleasure smoking
it."
eyes / can; you see the longer /
smoke it the happier will be when I'm
done. Texas Siftings.
BOTH SIMILARLY AFFLIcTFD.
Miss Calumetta Dearborn (of Chicago)
My watch runs fast.
Miss Russelina Dorchester (of Boston,
My horologue, also, is inclined to exer-
else too excessive an acceleration in the
movements of the elements of its me-
chanism.- Jewellers Circular.
HANDY.
Penelope--Why do you say Charley
Nixen is like a spyglassG
Perdita-Because can draw him out,
see right through him, and when am.
tired of him, shut him up Brooklyn
Life.
HOW 1T HAPPENED.
''Were you upset by the bank fail
ureq'
eyes; lost my balance"
HOUSEHOLD WORD.
THAT mans name is a household
word"
Really Who is hei"
His name Is Cook"
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
IT CHILLED HIN.

He saw her at Manhattan,
As with eager bird-like grace
She gave dainty order,
Then glanced around the place.
He greeted her politely,
But it gave him quite chill,
For it took just thirteen dollars
For to pay that bird like bill.
A - New York Herald.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
WHAT HE WAS GOING TO DO.

81 don't know what on earth I'm GO
ing'to do" said Harkins. ''My income
is IS, 900 and my expenses $40,
"You are going to bust" said Hicks.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
YIELDED FIRST.

Briggs-Spriggins had hard time the
other day. He put porous plaster on
his chest and thought he would try to
get it off by getting down on the carpet
and rubbing himself back and forth.
Griggs-Did he succeed
Briggs-No. The carpet came up.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
WHAT WORKED 1T.

Seedy Customer (at entrance of base
ball park)-I have always had curiosity
to know something about the mechanism
of turnstile. On what principles does
it work9
Gat,keeper-Cash every time. Step
aside, my friend. You are hindering the
procession. = Chicago Tribune.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-18
HIS OPINION.

"What did you think of my bookf"
inquired the author of the critic.
"Oh, thought great deal of 1t, I" was
the prompt reply, and the critic passed
on TO prevent an expression of the nature
of his thought Detroit Free Press.
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1892-12-10
1UCxLnN's AaEICa BALL.
Taking a a1enn ADVANTAGE.

Superstition is by no means confined to
khe uneducated classes" remarked John
Henry JaniSon to a party that was spin
ming ghost stories in the rotunda Of the
Southern. Il believe there is a more or
less strongly defined vein Of superstition in
every mortRfs makeup, but women have
more than their share Of it. Nine vorer
out OF ten are worshipers OF Mumbo Jum-
DO. They believe that warts can be talked
off, that cutting child's finger nails be-
fore he is a year old will cause it to be-
come thief, and have hundred other su-
perstitions equally as absurd. I unce took
a mean advantage of female credulity.
"a few years ago became desperately
enamored of young Baltimore belle. She
had several suitors, and much feared that
I was not the favorite ona Now the
young ladies of Baltimore have a supersti-
tion that by performing some Mumbo jun
DO ceremony at midnight on the first day
of May, then looking into an open we'll,
maid may see the face Of her future hus-
band Her brother had been college chum
of mine, and together we fixed up little
scheme. We made a round screen of thin
cardboard that would just fit the well on
her fathers premises In the center we
cut a hole large enough to admit my head.
Shortly before midnight / entered the well
with my screen and a lamp. I descended
twelve or fifteen feet, put my head through
the screen, beneath which held the lamp.
II had just completed my arrangeme1 IS
when heard the young lady chanting the
mystic lines She looked into the well and
appeared frightened, but satisfied The
next day popped the question and was
accepted. I have never undeceived her.
She believes to this day that our marriage
was ordained by the fates st. Louis
Globe-Denocrat
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1892-12-10
A Story of ,he Able May.

A cure from the country called on the
Able May at Paris one day, and after
complimenting him with earnestness and
sincerity on his creditable and deserved
reputation, said that he was involved in q
lawsuit which he did not understand He
asked the able TO advise him whether he
was in the right or in the wrong, and
whether he had better carry on the suit
So saying he delivered to the great jurist
an enormous package of papers covered
with almost illegible handwriting.
The able cheerfully accepted the task,
and told the cure to call again in two
weeks. He was pleased with the good,
simple hearted man, and devoted his best
energies to clearing up the case, though he
was obliged to put other matters aside in
order to do So
The cure called on the day appointed,
took the abbe's written opinion and read it
through critically. BE was delighted with
the enthusiasm and olearness with which
his rights were set forth. lie embraced
the able gratefully and cried: An, mon
sieur, no one could be better pleased than /
am, and I want you to be satisfied also.
Here is money, monsieur, please take what
is due YOU" and he threv a three franc
piece on the table
Not to humiliate the good man the able
picked up the coin, took thirty-six sous
from his purse and handed his client "the
change"
Some one said, when he told the story,
that as usual he had lost by his disinter-
estedness.
''Lostf said the able "And do You
count the pleasure Of telling the story
nothjnPfr
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1892-12-10
Row Try This

IL Will cosi you aoIhIag and VIII eudiy
DO you good, if you have, "a rough, colder
eny trouble with throat. chest or lungs.
II KINGS New Discovery for consump
tion, coughs aud colds is guaranteed TO
give relief. or money will be psid back.
Sufferers frou, Ia grippe found it lust the
hing and under its use had a speedy and
perfect recovery Try sample bottle at
our expense and learn for Yourself Just
how good thing il is Trial bottles
free at Hartz & Bahnsen's drug store
Large size soc aud 81
SPECIMEN CASES.
S 81. Clifford, New Cassel, Wis, was
troubled with neuralgia and rheumatism
bis stomach was disordered, his liver WAS
effected TO an alarming degree, appetite
fell sway, and he was teri bly, reduced in
flesh and strength Three bottles OF
Electric Bitters cured him.
Edward Shepherd, Harrisburg, III, had
a running sore on his leg OF eight years
standing. Used three bottles of Electric
Filters end seven boxes of Bucklen's
Arnica Salve, and his leg is sound sud
well. John Speaker, Catswba. O.. bao
five large fever sores on his leg. doctors
said be was incurable. One bottle Elee-
trio Bijters and one box Bucklen's Arnic
Salve cured MIN entirely Sold By Hart,
& B6hnsen.
SUCKLHN's AGE7Ca BALL.
she best salve IL tha world lor cut
7'ises, SORES, ulcera, oalt rbeum, sevs
92 letter, chapped banda, ohilbl5i-
--7ls and eli skin eruptions, End pol.
-eiv cures piles. or nc pay re9ui,eG !,
,G4ra1 teet 80 give perfect ol So. Z,
ico1ey refunded Price 90 slzsa J.
Eor ala ~ Fsr!s f Rlt,es,
Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1892-12-10
Professor Holden. Views of Mar.

Professor Edward S. Holden, the as
tronomer and director of the Lick observa-
tory in California, is not very hopeful
about the present Investigations Of the
planet Mars. when we come to an ex-
animation Of the particularities of Mars
surface we find dissimilarity and not like
ness to details of the earth's," he says in
The Forum. Under these circumstances.
and SO long as such widely divergent views
can be advocated by competent observers,
it appears to me that the wise course Is to
reserve judgment and strive for more
light -