The Wheeling daily intelligencer. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1865-1903, 1892-09-29
a FKAGMENT FROM THE ASSES.
SORs."

IAN old tragedy by William sPokeshaye, author
Of DISBURSEMENT aud other poemsl
PLAcE-Ahcieut Rome
TiNE-The DecEdeucoe,
S~CESE-Bedslde Of n sick Assessor.
tALBUs stretched on his bed. LCcuLLrs, MET'
ElLuS and other Assessors gather IN after their
day. work.
LuC., MET.. n nj
The gods assist you, Albus.
AlBusi-
Iva here comes news! Brave friends your
Your pity. too: for sec me whore lie
Here stretched Rbcd in posture Of the grave,
While We, clNte. gkscss the city through,
10 End in all, glad mirth attending you.
By Mars! my friends, I'm more than hall re-
10 lean upon one cru,ch and fight with
tUthCr.
Ere stay behind his business!
My Albus. yet mcthinks you half forget
That you, though Idly lying, draw your pay,
Puck up your thought Of dracbmas easy won,
And yoall rejoice.
ALBus;-
Ptyro'i what think you mel
Forget, Albus forget! why, man, YOU know
That when the Senntc cnlne To me Rbrh
To crave my resignation ! replied:
VAIN do you sue; III not resign Hwhit.
know u good thug when my optics sect:
III fhst freeze to this snap, YOU bet your life,
I'm lie Nbcd mud draw my drachmGs thus
Why, friends, you sure recall the days gone by,
Before the gang got IN; ere yet ''RelOrm"
Chased honesty afBr. Why then, they ray,
Assessors daily got three pAltTy drnchmnS,
While W. ret i've. You know. You well may
lift
Your itching palms in horror at the thought.
1t we'll m0y make US wtace; then, stranger
s,lil.
Those old.timc patriots tried to assess Alright,
Not gtG.s, rs we do. But ! talk lplcc.
Methinks sick man could better hold hts
tongue.
This is q free aud friendly con ference. .
So lei me hear how goes the bunTr Work on.
MErEtLrS:-.
liza! ha, my Alhus, merry was our day,
Jove! how we strutlcd thro' the Gdmiring
Our Doom day books upon our arms you'd
They %gSc the sybils' books of Fate. Nayt as
for that,
They were TO hold the bankrupt doom Of
many.
Aud W the Fatcs. l hit one fellow hard
This very muVu: | did II lor revenge,
You see. he's Senator. one Of the few
That yet remain to hunger after right.
His vote was cast against me when | ran.
venged myself to-day. Before his house
We gathered, and we wore our wisest looks
Aud pcered Into our fOliOs, the while
We laughed within our tunics' narrow sleeves.
igently whispered to the boys: hit hard,
Il have my reasons fort" We did ii, TOO.
II he can sell his palace for the half
Df his assessment, may ] lose my ears.
So went the good work on. LuGulluS tGer5
Tut down his fathers taxes with Il viii,
And put the %neighbors' UP, And when, per-
chance,
We came to one who was nor friend uor foe,
"e tossed Il coin into the vncnnt air.
And he who lost was doomed TO make Il guess
And Tx some price upon The property:
S0me ITicc, no tuattCr what, II ouly htgb,
You know the word went out from where the
ring
Us counsel holds, and lays its cunning plans.
That gold was all too scarce and more must
come.
They reached the limit OF The legal TAX,
Md so assessments must nigh tOtbied he,
Iln! hal my Albus. how the crowd will fune
When in the Forum I'LL Is public made.
hut we have got them by the very ears
And they must grin and bear II ns they may;
Uuless-ah, there's the lrOublc!-they should
learn
How all that we have dong Illegal Is,
Since We, Assessors, should own realty
In bona .dds simple fee.
ALr;--
The gods foriend!
Now some, my friends. we must Rwny In haste,
We're Wnited by the boss this very hour.
Jove speed you, Albus, better health!
ALBus:-
l grieve to see you 30: but II you must,
Return the morrow eve, to tell mt more.
Farewell, sweet friends, Idurst not tempt you
~LExEuNr.l