The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1892-11-20
TIE dRIZDN.f KICKER.
The Agricultural Edi;or Exhibits "a Rare
Descriptive Talent.

No. live are not tho editor OF the Kicker.
| who is also Mayor OF the town. state Senator,
! and the owner OF tho fastest running mule In
| the Territory. We are not tho horse eti,o on
n salary of 80 per week. We are not the ma
| rino editor on u salary Of 81. We arc simply
| the agricultural editor on u salary Of 50. but
gaining on 1t all tie time. TO us has fall
en- Tho sad duty OF dc,ailin: the occurrences
which caused such intense excitement in tho
town last Saturday and which have been tel.
cgraphcd all over the country This duty de-
wolves upon us because tho editor Is in bed
with knife wound in his right side: the horse
editor is laid IN with bullet holo through
his hand: the marine editor is nursing cash
in his cheek. and wc are temporarily in charge
OF the greatest family newspaper in tho West
subscriptiun price two dollars per year. strictly
in advance.
1t isn wcl-krown fact that tho editor and
proprietor OF the Kicker has for several years
possessed private graveyard, Iio began
with ono plant" aud under the most adverse
circumstances. but by the exercise Of dill
grnce. perseverance,. and good judgment he
had. up TO year ago. increased the number to
ten. Two years ago no bought an acre Of
sandy ground and enclosed 1t with n neat
picket fence. Tho ground was sodded and set
ont with shrubs. vines. and howers. the graves
were placed in regular order on each side OF
the main avenue. and tho spot has really been
the only one in the neighborhood to interest
sGhtseers 1t is the only private editorial
graveyard in the West. and about tho only
recreation our chief has had for two years past
was in working about the Enclosure with spade
and rake.
Last March. when tho tenth misguided
criter was laid away to rest our chief OK
pressed the earnest hope that he would be the
last Bad men were getting scarcc. our
esteemed contemporary wasn't worth powder
ana lead. and it did seem US II the hope OF the
great editor might DO realized. But the skele.
and rattl!n.: its bones as it headed this way.
Last Friday night there arrived in this town
yii!c. over by the Black Mountains. No one
knows exactly why he came. but he was sized
noon at 10 clock. as our chief was about to
enter the kcE",, office he found the stranger
was ,!ashing of a half column nrtlcis on tho
mu" as a factor in civilization. The marine
editor was nrsnarnE statistics s to prove sL tnat
rass over. the four. foot shoals Of the Little
Colorado River; and tho agricultural editor
Of tho great Vest All w was ' Peaceful and
our chief, az has been hinted at on two, or
three previous occasions, has contracted
converse with man he instnctivcly or in-
tuitively, or whatever It may he called. splits
tobhrcO Juice on mat man bOotS. III Is SIM
ply /, habit or notion. He does not know when
he does it. and tho action has no meaning;
The stranger stopped him to ask about real
estate matters. aud they had not been talking
over minute when our chief expectorated
after his usual fashion. Mr. kelso at once
bus inoss. The horse editor and marine editor
rushed out at the first alarm. and for. mo-
ment things We're mixed up. Our chief was
heeled ne usual. but didn't want to shoot
unless Obliged to. He crawflshed half way
e Gae dS0 bIt t enS TO snsp a Ss
lie was after rich red editorial blood. and
when it was seen that nothing else would
satisfy him he was dropped in his tracks. He
had wounded all three men and WAS fully bent
the afternoon. and Of course our chief was
wounded. he was advised TO remain quiet for
| few days. Acting under his instructions We
taker. and had the late DECEASED liked up with
one OF those favorite $3.50 collins. hired Ave
| carriages for n funeral procession. and he was
| buried In the private graveyard and his mound
| temporarily marked No. H." Within u
month he will have n handsome hcadbonrd.
the trailin. nrhutus will be in training to trail
| over his last rcstin.. place
| No ono can regret this affair more deeply
than our chief. to didn't want to do it. but
While no ono but the small soucd. weak.
brainod. chick"n-heared editor Of the alleged
weekly sheet down tho street hlamcs him in
the lcnst. he feels that Mr. kcso may not havs
been prepared for his sudden trir. and that it
might have teen letter t" run away 1t will
Is that We are purely an agricultural editor on
n moderate salary. amt our ways are full OF
peace and humility. "" love our chief and
are loyal to him. but wo have our limit.