Oxford eagle. (Oxford, Lafayette Co., Miss.) 1876-current, 1892-03-31
- REAL huMOR."
Bus Then 10 Dtd Net seem to re Duly
Appreciated

Can I stay here and steep on \
lounge tonight asked \ sad faced
young man as he walked into the Press
club last evening and joined n group Of
reporters I've got TO.
whether I can or not I'm a victim
81 the boomerang April-fool Joke IL
started in like this: Twas Just getting
mr. comfortable second nap his morn
ing when a call came on my door and
the voice Of the landlady notified me
that the roStman was below with a
registered letter for which I must give
n receipt in Pers1u- Had ] been good
and awake I would not have been
caught hy sueh a transparent Joke. but
! was just stupid enough TO hustle into
n portion Of my clothes snd tramp
downstairs where everybody hailed me
with that old chestnut about April
fool
Il went back to my room. sore in
spirit. aud kept thinking of n plan
to get even all through the day By
afternoon I bad the thing al ixesi up
and proceeded Ia work out my pan
I went home between i've asd SIX and
took occasion To NOPE about for a liz
tie while. making all the folks s~e me
and notice nv guinness I was the
very embodiment of Voc and wouhi
only respond in mono~yliahleS Then
! went To ny room. took of my eoat
and vest and put a streak Il red ghAst-
ly greas. paint across my neck reSem-
I bling a slash witha razor In addition
tn this I put n red spot on nv SHIRT
front. and then. graSping a ~ in my
left hand-th- biaie closfei with irrf-
tation blond-and n revolver in my
right. I fired two blank cartridges. let
n wall out Of me-. staggered and fell
with n thud 70 the floor There lay.
with the revolver firmly graSped N
my right hand and the razor IN my left
In a second I heari feminine
creams and paftering footsteps on the
stairs Then the landiady and two or
three married one and the servants
broke into my room. saw my blood
stained corpse stretched cut on the
floor. and set MP an assortment %
shrieks which made the pictures turn
face to the wall Then ! heard some
means and a woman Topped to the
foor in a faint More means and an
other topped The iandIady and her
sister came 10 me and bent over mo
with Mortified exclanations. and the
first thing knew the sister let loose \
little wall and fell across my stomach
In about a seeoLd the landlaiy herself
sunk in a heap %ith In arm thrown
across my neck, ~whereupon the servan;
girls turned and fed with shriekS
- - f.
forms of my sympathizers and sat up
IL was a beautiful sight Four women
dumped down on the floor regardless
of appearances. some of then. with
their noses p~uneturing the carpet and
some tied in knots l threw n glassfuI
of water in each woman's face. aud lit
a cigarette and watched EN- come to-
They opened their eyes about the same
time, and pretty soon sat up and looked
about en- | watched their faces. and
when | saw hat they had about got
their bearings l blithely remarked:
April foo and rubbed the red grease
paint off my neck with a towel Just
then the servant girls returned with a
policeman and came charging upstairs
/ happened to know him and gave him
n wink, and told him it was n mistake;
that one of the boys had worked \ lit
tie April-fool joke OF the folks and he
went away. But the women turned in
and abused me scandalouS and the
landlady ordered me out of the house
at once To escape their wrath ] fed,
and when sneakej back after supper
found my trunk on the doorstep with a
note tackled to it ordering me not 70 try
to enter on pain of being murdered IN
my bed
That's why Tn here When will
the American people learn to appre-
eiate real hunOr7 That's what want
TO knOw--Chicago Nail