davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
One, Two. Three "

christmas ScrlDneF.I
IL Was an old, old. old, old lady,
And n boy who WAS hali-pasi three;
And the way that they played together
Was beautiful 70 see.
She couldn go running and jumping,
And the boy, no more could he,
For he was thin little fellow,
With a thin, little, twisted knee.
They sat in the yellow sunlight,
Out under the mnpe-tree;
Ana the game that they played I'll tell you
Just as Il was told 10 me.
II was Hide-snd- Go-Seck they wore playing,
Though you'd never have known II 10 be-
With m old, old, old, old lady
And boy with twisted knee.
The boy would bond his face down
On his one little sound right knee.
And he'd guess whore 6he was hiding,
In guosses One, Two, Three!
"You arc in the china-closet!"
lie would cry. and laugh with glee--
10 wasn't the china-clO5et:
But he still had Two ana Three.
"You are up In papa's big bedroom,
In the chest with the queer old key!"
And sho said: "You ara 'cdrn aad uGrmer,
But you're not quite right said she
alt can't be the little cupboard.
Where mamma's things used % be-
so it must be tue c,Othes-prcSs gran'ma !"
And ho found her, with hi5 three.
Then she covered her face with her fingers,
That were wrinkled and white and wee,
And she guessed where the boy was hiding,
With One ana Two and q Three.
And they never had stirred from their places,
light under the maple tree
This old. old, old, old lady,
And the COY with the lame little knee
This dear, dear. dear old lady,
And the boy WHO was haif-past three.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
HIS VERY LONG FAST.
JAMES STILL, A coLoREo YOUTH,
EATS NOTHING IN Ga DAYS.
clans Say He IL suffering from
"BenIgn" Tumor
Nav York Herald.l

James Still. colored inmate OF the New
Jersey Reform School at Jamesburg, N. j.,
hasn't eaten a square meal in the whole
course of his short life of fourteen years, II
his story il TO be believed. IL Is certain.
however, that he has not eaten anything
to speak Of since be was admitted to the
institution in August. 1890, and IL IS also
certain that no food of any description
passed his lips during period Of sixty
four days, beginning September 9Th Of this
year.
During this long fast James did not lose
flesh, but actually gained fifteen pounds
in weight. He was willing to continue tho
trial longer, but DR.. III. i. Zandt, the at
tending physician of the school, and Super
intendent Otterson insisted upon his eat
ing something.
They tried him first with milk, then with
n specially-prepared beef-tea, and then
with crackers soaked in warm water and
sugar. James said that they oil tasted
alike TO HIM. Since then. however, he has
taken meat IN his mouth and chewed al,
but has not swallowed any. He says that
if he had any money he would DO glad TO
back himself 20 the full extent of his pile
against any professional or amateur tasters
IN the world.
Young Still is bright and cheerful and
looks Just as healthy rs boy OF his years
should look.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
The Dog Swallowed the Watch.
fBlockyayville Record

A young lady Of Wilcox had beautiful
gold watch, of which she was unduly
proud. The timepiece was exhibited on
various occasions, and a few days ago,
when some admiring friends were ex-
aiming it, the watch accidentally shipped
from their fingers. A cry of dismay went
up when the party saw the watch disap-
pear with gulp in the yawning mouth
of dog which sat at their feet looking
expectantly upward and good naturedly
wagging its tan. Poor doggie imagined
that he had received choice morsel. and
looked pleased With his feat of catching it
on the fly, but 1t proved TO DO his DEATH
warrant. He was summarily dispatched,
and at the post-mortem the watch was re-
covered none the worse from the mishap.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
a CHECK TO THE NlRTH.
ho" a Young Aueiioheer Game TO See tho
serious Side OF Case.
fDctroit Free preagl


Detroit Free Press
There was a resting spell with the auc-
uDheeT, ana the reporter standing by his
box looked at hIm.
Gone" inquired the reporter. as the
Gnctopeer sat down, tired
Vel, I've been gong all morning and
ought 20 be-" responded the auctioneer.
You oughtto be a funny man, great
American humOrlst, or something OF that
tort suggested the reporter
Josh Billings was one and he got his
star; at the block" said the auctioDeer,
IehectiNeiy, and some auctIoneers are
ENen 70 tnat sor, Of thing vet | was that
way myself when l first began, but | had
before II had fixed itself permanentlv ~ y
The reporter turned a face fuIi az inter
Iogation points On the euetioneer and he
kept on.
Il was called on once to sell nv a,c,,on
q lot of household furniture beiongnns, tn
Q man and his " 70 who had been sarsisS
four or five years. All knew abont N was
that death somewhere necessitated tbe,p
removal from my town. and, as they had
no money, they were compelled 10 sell
their effects 10 get enough 70 nova
on. Well, i was having picnic in
my young and foolish way guyinc and
bantorine aud making brilliant aud witty
side remarks on tbs articles as they came
under the hammer, so TO speak, though /
don't remember ever having used ham.
mer or seen any other auctionesr use one.
After had disposed Of lot Of stuff a
cradle was put up. There were several
young men OF my acquaintance in tha
crowd. and I smiled at them as turned
the cradle round and began TO rock H.
cumming a lullaby as / did so. .Empty
10 the cradle. bsby's gons.' l said, and
was going on 70 say something else to
gst q laugh, when happened 10 look down
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
Fine Philosophy.
IAnu NI.-.h Hiunnnn

Two of the yirginians who have come to
the Pasteur Institute to DO vaccinated
against hydrophobie were IN grave consul
tatiop. g am sorry you told the doctor
that he must not hurt YOU" said the elder,
aged II. " am sure you would rather
suffer than dIe.n
Me- replied the other. aged6 II would
rather die and be born again and not be
bitten by a dog"
Savants have tortured their brains for
centuries and not found trues philosophy;
and the innocent say things that make the
experienced turn pale.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
RECIPE FOR A NOVEL.
Mr. Grant Allen, a Recognized Authority,
Tells How to Write q story.
IIUHuuH uUIIV VVIHI"H'J
Mr. Grnnt Allan lectnred ON Wednesda

tlondon Public Opinion.l
Mr.. Grant Allen lectured on Wednesday
ut LeedS upon The Novel as She IS
WROTE Everything is now "syndi-
ia several weekly newspapers simul-
taneously. That makes it convenient 10
fix half-yearly period. and as
rule, the novel extends from January ISL
10 Juno 30th. or from July lst TO Decem-
Der 3lst. Two chapters are given weekly,
making hfty-two in the six months. Inc
great thing is the plot. What people want
is strong plot. For this the novelist on
receiving tho editors letter. consults MS
note book. in which central ideas for sto-
ries are recorded with charming brevity;
When the plot has been selected tho
writer proceeds TO elaborate II and spread
il ont thin over the requisite number or
chapters. This requires the INTRODUCTION
of episodes, and he usually introduces
twenty-sx for each instalment.
One well.known novelist writes his
which everything hinges and Afterwards
works backward to the chapters that lead
40 10 them. In this way he is IN no doubt
as 10 the situation of the doors OF the
drawing room or the precise date on
which the murder was committed; Inc
good, solid. domestic, bread;snd-butt
novelist writes straight ahead from the
urSL CuableIs
The conscientious novelist, and there are
such. saws Mr.. Allen, writes skeleton chap
te-s first and draws them gradually out
making the conversations and the episodes
more life-hke by constant addition. The
most ordinary way OF writing is TO write all
the chapters out tolerably fully at first, but
without much attempt at literary style,
and then to 60 over the whole
ground piecemeal, making additions
of the sort when give literary ia
Vol to the composition. As for the humor,
that is usually inserted afterwards. When
the novel has been completed alterations
IN II NAV be required. The editor, who
represents the capitalist behind him, and
also Mrs. Grundy, Is usually ready with
suggestions. Immense pains have to be
taken to cOncillate Mrs. Grundy: MIR.
Grant Aliens lecture gave great pleasure
to those who heard 1T.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

line of political theft. They have never
looked upon the stealing OF few seats
in the Legislature as being very. diff
cult undertaking. and have accomplished
such q feat frequently. They snatched the
governorship once when. Governor Boyd
wasn't looking. and they kept Il. too. until
the United States Supreme Court com.
PEELED them to restore it to the riRhtful
occupant. If they arc really determined
20 steal enough seats IN the present Legs
Iature TO assure the return of q Republi-
can TO tho United States Senate they must
be closely watched or they will be success
full. The Democrats and Populists In Ne
braska cannot afford TO sleep until the
next Senator is elected.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
Ballot Reform In Virginia.


II is evident that ballot reform in Vir-
ginia IS to be one of the live questions in
tho near future. 1t is not improbable that
1t will be the leading question In the po-
liticAi discussions of next year. The ex-
element Of presidential election is over,
and the public will be free to bestow ear
nest attention on matters of domestic con-
Germ. II cannot b0 denied that there Is
urgent need for the adoption OF some
measure TO protect The State against igno-
rance and venahty, the two most danger
Gus foes Of national liberty.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
Erupiion ef,he slim Curnn.

Ed. Yenney. Brockville, Ontario. Cana
da. says:
II have used Brandreth's Pills for the
past fifteen years. and think them the best
cathartic and antI-bilious remedy known.
For some five years | suffered with an
eruption Of the skiu that gave. me great
blood remedies. bat, although gaining
strength the itching was unrelieyed.
finally concluded TO take thorough course
Of Brandreth's Pills. took isixaach nigh
for four nights. then FIVE. four. three. two.
lessening each time by one, and then for
one month took one every night, with the
happy result that now my skin Is perfectly
clear sad las been no ever since.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

A Ballad Of High Life In Chicago.
New York SUM-
Last night dear Mrs. Bacon-Rhynde,
or Prairie aYenOO,
Got up a fste 10 celebrate
Her daughter Maude's dayboo.
The layishness OF wealth displayed
Would turn CrGsus pale,
And best OF all was Bacon Rhynde
In his lrst sWallertail.
A hundred splendid carriages
Drove thlther through the mud,
With the alest who came to greet
The latest social bud.
In TACT, the city all was there,
Excepting the cannail,
Aud mO1gst them all strobe BacOn-Rhynde
Ia his first swallertaiL
Dis doaskin vest was decollay,
As all such vests should be,
And frills galore his bosom wore,
gorgeous sight 10 sec;
-Four diamonds that for king
Al ransom would avail,
ShOne In his shirt when Bacon-Rhynde
Wore his nrst sWallertail.
His collar high ifs fence upreared
About his rlddy neck;
his long cuffs shOne with perfect tone
And innocent of neck.
His trousersl When speak Of them
Ny powers begin 10 fail,
For they we're white when Bacon-Rhynde
Wore his first sSallertail.
French counts we're there and English lords
And real Eyetallan docks,
And native pets whom cigarettes
Had made as pale as spOoks.
Great men we're there whose bank accounts
No crisis could assail,
But Bacon-Rhynde ouidid them all
In his first swallertaiL
l can't forget that swarry held
On Prairie aYenoo:
Though twas by right his daughters night,
Twas Bacon-Rhynde's daybOo.
A Chinese Junk Of fashion be,
Full-rigged and under sail
ChicagO's great AkhoODd OF swat,
In his first swallertail.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
4 Possible objection.

Miss Carter Oaks (from Hartford: Yes,
our city has more wealthy people IN proper
ton TO It's siZe than any other city in the
United States.
Epson Downes hope that won't make
any difference about my visiting you, Miss
Charter Cakes.
Miss Charter Cakes Pray, why should
it?
Epson Downes | didn't know but you
would object to having tho average lowered.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
Couldn't BE Caught.

Mr.. Sharpe s. Steele: am an agent for
the Mutual Safe Trust Benefit Aid Society,
which
Farmer st. Low who reads the papers, {:
No, ye don't, young man; ye can't catch
me on any o. yr bogus schemes-not
much. Offerin' to pay S. for every
dollar we receive, l s'pose? Can't be
done. Stands 10 reason 1t can't be done.
Git out,
Mr.. Sharpe s. Steele Um-you mistake,
SIT. Our company offers to pay only 81 for
every So you put in.
Farmer st. Low: Well, l must say that's
safe enough. I'll jine.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
A Refractory Sch olar.


Totorushes home from school and bursts
into tears.
II won't 60 back to that school again."
be sobs; no, not if I'm killed for it! /"
Z
"They want to teach me a whole lot of
things that | never heard of before, and
I'm not gong to waste my time learning
them.n
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
THE Boys HISTORY.

The boy says he was taken TO the colored
orphan asylum at Camden when 2 years
old. When bIg enough he was put out TO
domestic service in physicians family,
he saws. Ho ran away, but was arrested.
He was sent to the Philadelphia koforma-
tory, ana from there he was returned TO
the orphanage two years before he was
transferred 20 Jamesburg.
While free James says be was induced TO
enter medical college in Philadelphia,
where the students put him to sleep"
He points 10 lot of scars and punctures
on his body which. he says, are the result
of their work.
Observation-Disclosures George w. Shinn
told me that a four-ounce bottle of olive
oil lasted James more than two weeks. He
applies the oil twice every day as a general
thing, and his skin seems to absorb 1t at
once and in few minutes no trace Of the
OH remains.
Still says that the oil was first applied
by doctor at the Camden orphanage as
long ago as he can remember, and that he
has used it ever since. He prefers olive
oil If be can get 1t, but lard or fat of any
kind will do just as well. he says. He
rinses his mouth with water, but seldom
swallows any.
Still was not weighed at the beginning of
his fast, but at the close he tipped the
beam at ninety-one pounds, which is about
his present weight. Still is feet l inch
tall, and well developed. His flesh is firm
and hard. He has resumed MS work IN the
brush-shop, but is allowed privileges
which the other boys are not. lie does
about as much work as any OF bis COM
panions, however.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

INV
Madam" said the lawyer 10 his client,
:" the jury gives you 5000"
Good - was the reply. THAT, with
the $4,000 we are suing the railroad CON-
pany for, will make quite q nice sum-"
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
a Novel Pen-Wiper.
tFlIogondo Blaettor.l

Little johnny: | must 90 home now. sir,
because my paya is going to write this eve
ming.
School Teacher: Well. he can write with
out your assistance. can't he?
Little johnny; No. Sir; because he uses
my hair as a pen-wiper.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
Wei Up In Thie, cry.
IChicago Herald.l

Nebraska Democrats believe the Repub-
licans of that State are preparing 10 steal
the Legislature ia order TO elect the next
United States senator The Nebraska
Republicans can prove by the record that
they have been fairly successful In the
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
PROUD OF HIS ACCOMPLISHMENT.

He is very proud Of his accomplishment,
although 1t is involuntary. DR.. Zaudt says
that he has either a benign tumor or a
closure OF the RsOphagus. He admits that
the fact that the boy thriyes without food
is n mystery 20 him. He is watching the
case closely, and means TO call the atten-
ton of the medical fraternity TO it IN n de-
tailed report which he will publish before
very long.
William f. Condor, who has charge of
Still. says that the boy seemed Just like
any other boy when he was received in the
institution. He was put to work In the
brush-factory. tie had frequent vomiting
spells, however, and after SIX or seven days
was transferred TO the hospital. There be
rejected food and begged constantly TO be
allowed 20 rub his body with grease, but
this the officers, with due regard for clean
sheets, pillows, and clothing, refused to let
him do.
The boy finally became so Ill that ne
could not walk. He had TO crawl around
the hospital on has hands and knees. His
body and limbs became greatly emacated,
though his face retained Its normal aspect,
while his stomach became much swollen.
humps the size Of eggs formed upon his
knees. He still begged for oil and permits
sion was finally given him TO use 1t.
The fast was undertaken, not wholly 20
crafty Jamoss ambition, but because DR..
Zandt believed that If the boy went with
out food for a time his stomach might be-
come normal.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
Coon-Hoiiow School Notes.

written TOT mo DlHpdlNL-l
Teacher: What Is the capital OF
Arizona?
Sam: Tucson.
Julian: 1t says Ienix i'll my book.
Teacher: What were Pompeii and Her
culaneum?
Sallie: Volkaners.
Lizzie: Nv lips are awfully chapped.
Charlie: Two-lip salve is good fur 'em.
Iizne: Grandma makes 1t. Pu get
some.
Louis: You Jest orter 60 upon Mt.
Marshall between Front Royal an Wash
ington. You kin see all over the United
Stats an part Of Page county.
Teacher: On what kind of a field do the
stars of the, United States dag rest?
Kate: On battlefield.
Jim: Boys, l went home with Bill the
luther mite and his bed jes had handful
of fethers in it, an the Stats KUN rite up
threw the Tx.
Bill: That's fax, boys, but Use fixed
mo- kumturtlbble an that now.
Teacher Boys, gentleman IL coming
in here directly and | want you 10 be SO
quie. that you can hear pin drop.
Scene 1.-THE teacher was soon talking
TO the gentleman in a low tone and the
bows were as still as death, when suddenly
one little shaver yelled out, NO,1 Ut her
drdp."
Teacher Bob. write 62s on the board
for me. Now, 927.
Bob: Is this right9
Teacher: Yes. Now write ten billion.
Bob: Whllikins May go home?
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
How 10 Preserve II.
Indianapolis Journal !

"Our friendship must never die" he
said. 1T must be kept green forever"
Then We must be careful that II does
not rlpen into love-" she replied.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
A Way to secure II.
|, Ballad OF High Life In Chica

Cousin Kate: Sue, whatever induced
you to marry that little squire?
Cousin Sue: / wanted justice
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
KneW His Man.


Footpad: ] want your watch.
Cholly: LII haven't a-any with me.
Footpad: Oh, l knew that. Gimme the
ticket.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
A BEAUTIFUL RECEPTION.
Given by Mr.. and Mrs. +. c. Pulliam Mt
Leuisburg, w. Va

W. w
correspondence Of the Richmond Disoatch.l
LEw1sBuRG. w. Va, December 1.-THE
large and pleasant residence OF Mrs. Sallle
Z. Pulliam, Of Lewis6urg, w. Va, was
aglow with animation and thronged with
the merriest party OF trends Iuesday
evening last that perhaps ever before as
sembled III the spacious rooms. The oc-
casion WAS q reception rendered by Mr.
and Mrs. L. &. Pulliam, who were recently
married near Richmond, IN Hanover coun-
ty. Va. There were about seventy-hVe IN
yitations issued and as but small mum Der
of regrets were received, the attendance
was quite large.
The bride, an admirable young lady, APP
peared with charming effect IN q hand
some dress of white silk, en- train, trimmed
with chiffon. The groom was becominBly
sttlred in neat-ftting suit of the conyen-
tIonal black with a white satin tie. Inc
parlors and dinlng-room were beautifully
decorated with ferns, flowers, and ever
green's.
THE SUPPER.
At 10 o'clock the elegant and sumptuous
supper that had been prepared under the
direction of the popular cateress. Mrs. :.
F. Pulllam. was served and proved very
delightful feature OF the evenings ENJOY
ment. After the supper the evening was
spent IN SOclal cOuVersaIiOu' anu III ~
upper chamber music lulled the dreamy
senses with the enchanting strains Of
rarest melody, and under its bewltehlng
spell dull care fed to the four winds Of
the earth and merriment with JOY uncon-
fined reiened during the entire evening.
The bride and groom received tnelr
guests In a most cordial manner and en-
tertained them with a pleasing grace,
making each of them feel the welcome
that was betokened by their warm words
and smiling faces. The reception was per-
feet in all It's appointments, and was one
of the prettiest social successes OF the sea-
m
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18
TAXES.
OFFICE COLLECTOR OF CRY TAxEs,)
CITY HALL,
RICHMOND, Va, December l, 1892.
TOTICE TO TAXPAYERS.

~
The RESIDUE OF CITY TAXES FOR 1892
ARE NOW DUE and payable in this ofiice du-
ring THIS MONTH A penalty Of PER CENT.
will DO added to all bills remaining unpaid
DECEMBER 31sr.
Every male 81 years Of age and cyery person
keeping house or doing business in the city is
assessed for personal taxes, and those who have
not paid any city taxes during the year viii
please call and settle so as to avoid being posted
as delinquent
PAVING, PIPE. and SEWER-CONNECTIo
BILLS are also due, and will have TO be declared
delinquent II not paid on or before DECEMBER
3lsT.
oniceopen until p. NJ
H.. W. CUNNINGHAM,
de Lin Collector Of City Taxes.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

Pierce's Golden Medical Discovery.
First and foremost and above all things,
IL purifes the blood. Not only in March,
April, and May, when the sarSaparillas claim
10 do good, but all the year round, it cleanses,
renews and invigoratfs the system, rouseS
every organ into healthful action, and drives
out blood poisons Of every name and nature.
For tho worst forms OF Scrofula, the most
stubborn Skin and Scalp Diseases, such as
Salt-rheum, Eczema, letter, Erysipelas, and
all diseases or disorders caused by a torpid
liver or impure blood, nothing can equal it
as a remedy.
II any thing could it would be g,taran.
teed, just as the discovery" is. If that
back. Is any thing that isn't sold in this way
likely to DO "just as good 2"
See that you get the genuine medicine
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

Louis: You Jest orter 60 upon Mt.
Marshall between Front Royal an Wash
ington. You kin see all over the United
Stats an a part Of Page county.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

Teacher: On what kind of n field do the
stars of the, United States nag rest!
Kate: On battlefield.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

Lizzie: Nv lips are awfully chapped.
Charlie: Two-lip salve is good fur 'em.
Iizne: Grandma makes 1t. I'll get
Some.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

Rosy cheeks are
not made from
the outside. Pure
blood, an active
liver, good appe-
tito and digestion
49, these are the
things that give
them. And these
are the things that
you get with DR..
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

jim: BOYS, | went home with Bill the
luther mite and his bed jes had handful
of fethers in it, an the Stats KUN rite up
thrauV the fix
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

Teacher: What were Pompeii and Her
Sallie: Volkaners.
Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-12-18

Teacher: What Is the capital o
Arizona?
Sam: Tucson.
Julian: 1t SAYS 4enix in my book.