Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-30
A LOOK AROUND.

1t does not do to Judge of what people
will order by their appearance" said wise
old waiter as he famed away the flies. "Yes
sir, 1t is hard to tell what people will order,
and their dress and looks Will not always
indicate either their habits or their know
ledge of good living. Now, there was queer
looking couple here last week. AS you look
ed at them, you could fancy you heard the
crops growing on their backwoods farm.
'Ah' said to myself. look out for an order
of ham and eggs But no! 1t was not to be.
Said the old gentleman with the rural look,
after studying the bill of fare. Is your cook
a good onef' oh yes, said l. Well said he,
Il will have steak, a la Stanley, eggs, chip
poloti, a macedome salad, new peas and
cauliflower. Then we want tutti-frutti,
and waiter, I'll have a pint OF Aylala, and
bring my wife pint Yquem.' Indeed, sir,
you should have seen my face, 1 know it
was red with trying to keep it straight. Only
yesterday, there came in handsomely
dressed lady and gentleman, and what do
you think they ordered? OF all things sir,
If they didn't order large box Of sardines
and two glasses OF milk. Just fancy
month at that sort OF diet and then the
coroner"
EFT is not hard to tell where man comes
from, not the exact place, OF course, but the
part of the country" continued the commu-
NEGATIVE waiter. "Western people like meat
ana solid vegetables and sweet things, East
ern men, and especially New York and Phil
adelphia men, order salads and fish. and
you can tell them by their knowledge OF
what they order. The Western people drink
beer with meals, ana the Eastern ones order
ales or light wines. Southern people like
mutton and chicken and pies, and drink
champagne three times day If they can
afford it. There was bride and groom here
one day from the West ana he ordered blue
fish. There wasn't any blue fish and told
the cook to give them piece of shad. They
didn't know the difference. Thank your sir;
thank your
THE Point bridge people tell me that
was mistaken in saying that the West End
road has bought n considerable amount of
stock in the bridge. The offer of the COM
pany was made but not accepted, and the
bridge is still owned by the original
builders. AS yet, no arrangements have
been made to pay for the privilege Of cross
ing the bridge by the company, as directed
by the court
HAS IT struck you of late years that the
national points of the compass have shifted
wonderfully since people have begun to for
get the war? Instead of North and South it
is nowadays East, West and South.
THE Cheat River Clubhouse will be a
lively place this summer. A large party Of
ladies and gentlemen will leave for the pre-
serve on Saturday. The lease of the club for
this big tract has A years to run.
A MISCELLANEOUS reading of the news
papers suggests some amusing conclusions
as to New York State politically. Some of
the Platt people shake their heads and say
they really don't know whether Harrison
can carry the State. The Tammany braves
say sulkily that it does not look as though
Cleveland could get a majority. Who will
carry then-the Prohibitionist or the Peo-
ple's party man?
DO not want to force the City Hall
clock into undue prominence or make it a
campaitn issue, but why does it point to
l0:45 when the big bell strikes noon?
A CERTAIN broker has been teasing his
wife about some of her housekeeping arith-
metic and yesterday she got even with him.
"What time is it?' he asked her after lunch.
She took out her purse and held up half
dollar without word. He stared, scratched
his head and finally gave it up. "Anybody
who is upin figures" she remarked. sweetly.
would at once have understood that I
meant quarter of two"
THE weather is so fall-like Just now you
can almost imagine that the corn silk is
browning and the possums ripening instead
of it being early in the peach season with
can teloupes scarce and strawberries ltnger.
ing in the lap of raspberries.
AL CRAWFORD, the Philadelphia Demo-
cratic politician, Is in the city. He
was one of the mercantile ap-
pr,,isers before the Bardsley unpleasant.
ness and has been well-known
figure at Harrisburg during Legislative
sessions for many years. He is a candidate
for the nomination to the Legislature from
the Eleventh Philadelphia district against
Pap" Quigley, who is said to have first held
Office as reading clerk for the session OF Con.
gress held in Carpenters Hall, Philadelphia.
THE distinguishing line between the
of a man and a woman is that the
article that costs S75 and one that costs $50,
while the former thinks Of the difference
between $50 and nothing at all.
CHIEF BIGELow heartily approves of
The DIsPATcH's suggestion made some days
ago, to use O portion of the park as public
pleasure ground. The idea Of having pub
lie baseball park, tennis courts and general
playground, which can be had free on up
plication to the park authorities, will be car
ried out by Mr.. Culyer, the man who made
the famous public Fairgrounds in Prospect
Park, Brooklyn. While there may be some
hesitancy at first In using these grounds by
the people who live near the park, this will
soon wear away and it will be one of the