Morning journal and courier., 1892-05-13
Humor Under DimeuIties.

| One of the smartest of the celebrated
 Bishop Bloomfeld's bon-mots was alsc
 made during his last illness. He had in
 quired what had been the subjects of hiI
 two archdeacons' charges, and WAS told
 that one was on the art of making ser.
 mons and the other on church-yards
 "Oh, I see," said the dying bishop
 composition and decomposiIionl" Among
 the peculiarities of Selwyn which attrac-
 ten attention were his love of children
 and his morbid taste to see death or the
 dead. Not an execution escaped him, and
 he is said to have made a journey to Paris
 to see Dsmiens broken on the wheel. This
 last propensity was the subject of many a joke among his intimstes, of which the | first Lord Hollands was the best. When | on his deathbed he was told that Selwyn
 had called to inquire after him. "The | next time Mir. Selwyn calls," said he, | 'show him up; for if an alive shall be | delighted to see him, and if am dead he | will be glad to see me" Equally as grim ly cynical was the reply of William Tay- Tor for "Willie Harrow" as he was com
 monly called.) Being visited in his last " o Lloiiy Ac Wde oekcu II he Were prepared for another world.
 '"Deed sir," said Willie, 'T dinna ken if need trouble myself sboot it; for if the folk there are like the folk here they'll pay unco little attention to puir body like me-"
 Sheridan, too, when dying, on being re- quested to undergo an operation, humor- ously replied that he had already submit ted to two, which were enough for one mans lifetime. Being asked what they were, he answered: Having my hair cut and sitting for my picture" There is sly insinustion in the following, which, no doubt, was duly appreciated by the-person to whom it was addressed "Once," writes MT. Lawrence Oliphant, '1 was in Cornish mine, some hundreds of feet down in the bowels of the earth. Crawl ing down ladder and feeling that the temperature was every moment getting warmer, said to miner, who was ac- companying me: It is getting very not down here. How far do you think 1t is to the internal regionsP I don't know ex- actly,' he replied, but if you let go you will be there in two minutes.'" The field of battle has produced many an example of grim humor, and a capital story is told of how, when Sir William Scrope was about to charge with his troop at the fla nous conflict of Edgehill, at the opening ball of the parliamentary campaign against Charles l., he said to his young scapegrace of a son: "Jsck, if I should be killed, lad, you will have enough to spend," to which the witty rogue answered: And egad, father, if should be killed you will have enough to pay" fWhy aye you so melsncholyi" asked the Duke of Marlbor- ough of a soldier after the battle of Blen- helm. "I am thinking" replied the man, ''how much blood I have shed for six pence" Another retort of one of the rank and file conveyed a well-merited re- buke. A soldier had his two hands car ried of at the wrists by shot. His colo | nel offered him a crown. Colonel" re- piled the man, responsibility, eft was not l my gloves, but my hands, that lost"
 Even duelling, too, has discovered men | who will jest to the very last, and as an | example of grim humor under sipgularly | uncomfortable circumstances, the follow | ing would be hard to beat. NJ. de Nal saignes was 6 determined duellist. Hsv- ing quarrelled with a brother officer, they agreed to fight ont the dispute in the very room where it took place, when M. de Malsaignes adversary managed to run him door. "This is all very we'll, said the transfxed duellist; "but, pray, how are you to get outF" Dr. Mead and Dr. Wood ward fought under the gates of Gresham college. Woodward's foot slipped and be was at the mercy of his opponent. "Tske your life!" exclaimed Dr. Mead. "Any- thing but your physic," retorted the pros trate man.