Morning journal and courier. [volume] (New Haven [Conn.]) 1848-1894, 1892-11-03
COLD.

The coal -scuttle bonnet has been revived
in the north. 1t comes with cold weather.
-Picayune.
+ Flymme-What do you do to cure the
b!ueea Flamme-Paint everything red
Brooklyn Life.
CAN men have their ups and downs" P"
"Yes, even the tallest of US get short at
times. s."-Philadelphia Record.
Poser for butcher who gives short
weight-If 16 ounces go to pound, where
do you expect to go tol-Tit-Bits.
There is always room at the top" but
you had better carry up with you big
basket of victuals Galveston News.
Mrs. Birdie-How much is your income,
Chsrliea Mr.. Birdie-You ought to know;
you spend it all, my ydear.-Brooklyn Life.
Hairpins are made by o very complicat-
ed machine. They are used by very com
plicated creature, too.-Someryille Jour
nal.
The laborer may be worthy of his hire,
and yet not be able to persuade his en-
ployer that it should be higher hire.-Som-
erville Journal
He-Now, 1 admit that 1 am no angel.
She-No, So that was not what papa
meant when he said you were something
of high hyer.-Indianapoli Journal.
Johnny, do you go to schooli' eyes,
SIR" "I suppose you admire your teach
er." eyes, sir" "Whyp Cos shs kin
lick me with one hand. d."-WsshiDgto
Star.
81 hear Bingley is trying to make an
artist of his son; has he done any work
yetl" Speskquick-O yes; he draws on
his father egulsrly.-Chicago Inter
Ocean.
Mistress-Do you call this sponge cakei
Why, it's as hard as can be. New cook
Yes, mum; that's the way a sponge is be-
fore it's wet Soak 1t in your tea, num-
New York Weekly.
"Our family" aaid Miss Arabella Blue
blood, the naughty spinster, sis one of
great age." yes" said her rude and
democratic cousin, ''it's hereditary trait,
is it notr'-Chicago Tribune.
Public Opinion.-'I wonder whether
hanging is painful deathl Some people
say 1t isn't at all So" ''It must be.
Doesn't everybody cay that there's nothing
so painful as suspenseF'-Pick-Me -Me-Up.
She Gust after accepting him)-Don't
look so tenderly happy. Can't you man
age to wear some other expression for
ing US, and If you don't stop shan't have
ohothSA PAoRoHoA sSSh.
Tiger.
A Wise Resolve. ve.-Barrows-These rail-
way accidents are becoming too numerous.
l shall travel hereafter on bicycle. hrs.
Barrows-But accidents are just as COM
mon with bicycles. Barrows-True; but
there are never so many people killed.
There's only one victim in each case
Harpe1's Bazaar.
Mrs. Bronson (tenderly)-You can't i'm
| agine, Charley, what a lovely present I'm
| going to get you for Christmas. You'll be
| sure to enjoyit. Mr.. Bronson chastity and
with apparent irrelevance)- e)-Maria, dear,
Pm going to quit smoking ON the 18th of
December. Er-I thought you'd like to
know about It at once.-Chicago News
Record.
Star-This is q very good play, but it
| will have to be revised considerably.
| Drsmatist-Impossible, sir. Starch, it
must be. You make the hero appear in
every act. That won't do. The hero must
be taken out of the frat act, and also out
of the last. Dramatist-Whst! Open and
close the play without the heroi Star
Certainly. You see am my own mana
ger, and shall be busy in the box Office
during the first act, and very often busy
with the sheriff during the last act.-New
York Weekly.