davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

1T ISN'T IN THE ORDINARY WAY
that DIR. Pierce's Favorite Prescription comes
10 the weak and suffering woman who needs
il. It's guaranteed. Not with words merely;
any medicine can make claims and promises.
What il done with the "FavoTite Prescrip-
tom /, this IL il fails 20 benefit or cure, in
any case, your money is returned. Cen you
ask any better proof that a medicine VIII do
what it PROMISES
It's an invigorating, restorative tonic, a
soothing and strengthening ~nervine, and q
certain remedy for the lis and ailments that
beset q woman. In female complaint" Of
every kind, periodical pains, internal infam-
nation or liberation, bearing-down sense
tions, and all chronic weaknesses and ir-
regularites, it is q positive and complete
cure.
To every tired, overworked woman, and
10 every weak. nervous. and ailing one, IL IS
guaranteed 20 bring health n strength.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
A Tremendous Rumpas

In the system 10 produced By n ,isorderly
liver. Bile gets into the b God aud give. "a
saffron tinge 10 the counteuance aud eye.
balls. sick hcadaches eusue. the digestive
organs are thrown out Of gear, the bowel,
become c%ottive, there arc pain through
tho right side aud shoulder blade, tho
breath grows sour and the tongue furred.
dizziness is frequent, especially Oh rising
suddenly. This state OF nf ,irs could not
exist unless the disturbance .sere a seri-
Gus Que. Yo. ii il easily rcmediabie with
Hostctter's 81 mach Bittcrs. which re.
lieves every symptom OF biiiousness and
Indigestion. and promotes a regular action
OF the bowels. and Is auxiliary Of appe.
tite and sleep The bitters Is q superb
specific for malarial and kidney trouble,
rheumatism and debility. A w~ineglassful
thrice a day.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

DAVID C COOK Sunday School az the
age OF seventeen In the West Division OF
Chicago, and for four years following
taught most OF he time In two or three
schools each Sabbath.
The fire OF 1871 was the beginning OF
his mission and Sunday school work on
the North Side. His field was one OF
The toughest and poorest OF the burnt
district. Here, in a German theater and
beer-hall, he organized "Eyerybody's
Mission afterwards removed 20 a
building OF its own. With an attend-
ance u 800 TO 40, he sustained tho
school for Ave years without the aid OF
church or society.
Jesides this, he has since organized
and superintendent North Avenue Mis-
sion, Lake View Mission, Lake View
Union Sunday-schools in Chicago. and
the Sundays hOol connected with Craze
Church in Elgin, ILL.,, besides several
smaller schools.
His first publications were Issued for
his " Sunday-schools alone. Neigh
oring Sunday schools, approaching
the value OF these helps, became his
first subscribers. Soon Mr.. Cook dis
covered hat his were no. the only
schools that needed more and better
literature b q they could afford 10 buy
at the prices then existiny, aud resolved
10 make IL his life work TO place in the
hands OF the Sunday-school children OF
the land an abundance of the very best
literature at the lowest possible prices.
He was met at the very outset with
almost insurmountable Obstacles and
lively opposition; but the obstacles and
opposition OILY furnished zest, for he il
a man Of purpose, and ii has been well
said OF him, his indomitable energy de-
mands l~nsurmountable obstacles" That
his purpose was good and wise is proved
by the way he has been suppol ted.
IL is seventeen years since he issued
his first publication. and there is now
scarcely "A village or hamlet In the land
where they are not known and used.
lie employs regularly six associate
editors and some sixty writers, repre-
senting some OF the ablest Sunday
school talent In the land.
Among those who l.now him person.
ally he is always recognized as a man
OF strong Christian character, a prac-
teal worker In the church. Sunday
school and temperance cause. and a
warm friend OF missions, both home
and foreign.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
The Work OF Sslvatloa.

Mrs Podunker-Seems TO me 'tisn't
exactly right to lie addin' SO much
water to the milk, specially oil sun.
day morning.
Deacon Poiunker (miikman)-Why.
Miranda. you wouldn't stand in the
way o salvation, would yc?
OF course not
Well, don't ye know oue-half o them
what goes to church never hears q
word. because they're asleep an snor.
in In their pcws. It's shameful!
Indeed il is But they shouldn't fall
nsleep
They can't help It, Miranda Give
people rich milk, an they're bound to
feel sleepy. It's worse than opium.
funp u little moro, Miranda.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
In Olden Times

manently beneficial effects and were sat
issed with transient ac,itn, but now that
1, il generally known taat syrup Of Figs
will permanently cure habitnal constipa-
tion, we'll informed people will not buy
other laxatives. which ATT for y time, bu,
finally irjare the system
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
No Need of Hurry.

Sweet Girl--It's just too mean for
anything! There isn't going TO be any
opera.
Old School Friepd-Are you so fond
OF music?
Sweet chino, but | think If
there had been forty or fifty nights OF
opera ahead Geo-I mean Mr.. Nice
fcllo-wou'd have proposed as a mat
ter Of economy.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

Deserving Confdence-There is no
article which so richly deserves the entire
confidence of the community as BHowS's
BgoNCuAL TRoCHgs those suffering
from Asthmetic and Bronchial Diseases,
Coughs and Colds, should try them. Price
- cents.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

New Man signal oflicc)-Indications
ore for fair weather and northerly
winds. Which flaS shalt | put out?
Old Man-0h. any Of 'cm Nobody
knows the difference except sailors,
and it's too foggy for them TO see.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
~PhiildslphtL Ahead.

New York Boyle. you amt got
anything in Philadelphia we haven't
got
Philadelphia Boy-Bet we have. too
New York Boy-What?
Philadelphia Bo%y-Suicide clubs
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
No Removable Excuse,

First Little Boy-How did you break
your arm?
Second Little Boy-Fell off q chest
nut tee.
Was you playin' hooky?
No
Was 1t on Sunday?
No.
Huh! Iou must DO awfully awkward.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Important to Fieshy pccple.

We hav noticed n page article in the
Boston Globe on reducing weight az a very
small expense. 1t will pay our readers 20
send Z-cent stamp for - copy ~ Betina
Circulating Library, % l.. Washington
street. Chicago. Ill.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

Among several hundred congratula-
tory message, received by Carl Helmer-
ding on his 10th birthday was one from
Piuce Bismarck, which read rs follows:
Heartfelt good wishes. But the first
seventy years are the best"
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Only sky-scrapers There.

Medical Professor-Suppose a roofer
should fall from a building, what
would you do?
Student Ia Chicago youth Send
for an undertaken.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

When BABY was sick, we gave her CaStoria,
When she was a Child, she cried for Castoria,
When she became Miss, she chung to castoria.
When she had Children, she gave them CastoriA
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

HIRAMC WHEELER. Odebolt Sac county,
Iowa, sells frst-class imported PERCnE.os
and SHIRE STALLION, $50, l. z anu s cars
time. Imported mares cheap.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Sure to Go.

Little Dot Mamma Is going to take
me with her when she visits Aunt
Jenny.
Little Dick-Shs's goin' to take me.
too
Did she say so?
No
Then how do you know?
She'll never lcavc me hero with that
closet full Of jam,
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
A Pointer FOR I'n.

bank Direetor-why didn't you in
vito our cashiers little girl to your
party?
Small Daughtcr-Shc always wears
snch aw ullv 'xpensivo clothes it
makes everybody else feel ashamed.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Always Ready,

Mrs Do Goode-Why arc you throw.
ing stones at that little boy? Answer
me that, sir.
Small Son very good at excuses)-
Cause his folks doesn't b'long 10 our
church
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

Mr. and Mrs. Ira Ward, the oldest
couple ia Vermont. ~ anj " years, cele-
brated their diamond wedding at sew
Haven, VI this week.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

President Harrison has expressed a
wish that his recent nfliction be regarded
rs n private, not n public affair; which
maies 1t probable that, beyond the month
OF mourning agreed upon by the vice-prcs-
ident and cabinet, there will be no social
recognition of il.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

Miss Fannie Davenport may possibly
appear gs Lady Cay Spanker ana ~
Nancy Sykes in oliver Twist next
season.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

According 10 DIR. Seward Webb TWEEN
~ New York millionaircs nre ready to
build summer homes la Vermont just as
soon as the common roads are put In prop
ar condition.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
The Gsnuine Article.

Little Dot(who is cleaning her teeth
This prepared chalk, wen 4 Is mixed
wiz water, looks lust like milk.
Little Dick (who reads the papers,
or course. IL is milk.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

The original picture OF ssSheridnnsz
Ride" painted by =. buchanan Read, now
hangs Ia the private ofice of Thomas +,
James. preaideut Of the Linccln bank 81
New York city.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

AT q rsceut hunt oa the domain Of
General Won Wedell, Emperor " lillian
killed with his own haud 23j hares, ninety
pLeasants and twenty-five rabbils.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

FITs.-AU Eta STOPPED free by Dr.. KGtNE's
GnxIT NERVE lEsToRKR. No Fits sfter Ore. days
use. Marvellous cures. Treatise aud s2.yc ,ritl bOttle
free 10 Fit eases. send 10 Or. Kline, yJt Arch a.
Philadelphia, Pa.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

The venerable widow OF the late
Bishop Alexander Campbell, who lives at
Bethany, w. Va, celebrated he's 9th
birthday last Saturday.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Lack of ~B1pPdients.

First Boy-Grown folks Is such fools
Second Boy-How?
FRS. Boy--Jus' here 'cm making all
that fuss cause the dripkin' water
smells bad since the rain. They don't
seem 10 know 'nouyh TO hold their
noses wen they drink.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

The wife OF the Corean minister Mt
Washington has joined tho Presbyterian
church. aud most Of the members Of the
legation are expected to follow her very
shortly.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

Tho salary and c~moluments of the
prince Of Wales. Supposed TO be abous
- 800 o, would probably be enough for
his private needs were he not put to 20
largc an expense In performing royal and
social obligations which should be under
taken by his royal mother.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

For sick headache, dizziness or swim.
min In the head. pain In the back. body,
or rlcumstism. take Becchxm's Pills. T
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

~
Rev. i. s. Cook, :
Methodist Minister,
a cultured and schoI-
arly a Since ear
Hest childhood La
has been devoted ia
the Sunday School.
sIn boyhood he joined
church, and be-
gan teaching in the
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
A nriglt ruhllcati,n,

Little Dot-fara says this now
children's magazine is n bright publ
cation. What does that mean?
Little Dick-Can't you see? The pa
par glistcns so you can hardly read it
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Lost speed.

Mr. Gotham-Did your ship break
the record this trip?
Sea Captain-No. we met with too
many Interruptions
Iceberg?
No. only barks. and schoonera. and
thipga We lost speed every time We
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

1t is better to take SCOTS
Emulsion of cod-liver oil
when that decline in health
begins-the decline which
precedes consumption -
rather than wait for the germ
to begin to grow in our lungs.
"Prevention is better than
cure" and surer. The say
ing never was truer than
here.
What is it to prevent con-
sumption?
Let us send you book on
CAREFUL LIVING free.
..scorr& Bowsr, Chemists, I32 South sih Avenue,
New Sofk.
Your druggist keeps Scouts Emulsion OF cod liver
ei-.ail druggists everywhere 60. 81.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

NDlnaH, young oi piu, 81
with. and advice which
has restored many and
manga suffering woman
70 perfect health and
happiness. No woman
should live without 4
copy of GmH Z,
Heath and Ehgnffic,"
by Lydia l.. Pinkham.
Send 2 two-cent stamps
10 cover postage and
packing when you write.
LYDIA l.. PiSKHANi
MFp. Co, LYNN. Mass.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Dont give up and say There Is no hi

DON'T give zap and say there Is no her
for Catarrh, Hay Fever and cold In head, since
thousands testify that Eiy's Cream Balm has
entirely cured them.
i have beea bothered with catarrh for
about twenty years; I had lost sense of smell
entirely, and ] had almost lost my hearing.
Ny eyes were getting SO dim ] had to gel
some one 10 thread my needle. Now I have
my hearing as well as ! ever had. aud ! can
see To thread AS fine - needle as ever I did,
my sense OF smell seems TO be improving all
the time. Think there Il nothing like Ely's
Cream Balu for catarrh.- Mrs. X. L. Grimes
RendrilI, perry Co, q.
Apply Balm Into each nostril. II Is quickly
absorbed. Gives Relief at once. Price
&c CENTS as C.as-.s:s g ~ -sii
L BROTHERS. 20 Warren ST.. New York.
Mary E Wilkins. the successful story
writer. has recently entered the new and
more difficult field of dramatic compost
ton. aud her first play, entitled 'Giles
Corey. Yeoman,n will appear soon. IT IL
founded IN the wilchcrnft dclusiou nj
Salem 200 years ngo
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
DAVID Q. COOK.

The Pioneer Publisher Of Literature for
sunday Schools.
David c. Cook, the Chicago Sunday
School publisher, was born in East
Worcester, New York. I'm 1850. n so1 of
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Where the Tug Comes.

Little Doy-Don't Quakcrs over
fight?
Mamma-No. my dear.
Little hoy latter re~flection)-I should
think IL would be awful hard for q real
big Quaker to DO q Quaker.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

"Thc iceman won't stop leaving ice
until his bill is paid. and the coal man
won't bring any coal unless lie has The
money In advance.
Up-weil, ! still have credit Mt the
drug store. Get some phosphorus and
put II on the ice.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Free,
by f1ail,
to
Ladies'

ladies' calendar. Contains not a word Of
objectionable matter, and is crowded from
cover to cover with Information which every
Arnman rnunn or old shnnld kccnn,n fnmili.r
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

Iiail's Catarrh Care 1, taken internally
aud acts directly ON the blood aud mucous
surfaces Of the system send for testi
monials free. etc.
4 J CHENEY 81 co, Toledo. O
~ Sold by Druggists. 15c.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

a beautifully Illus
,rated book, contain
ing owe ninety pages
OF most important in,
formation about the
ailments of women.
Also a tail code Of
establish ed rules OF
etiquette for women
and a
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
STATE cr ONO. CRY or T Lrpo, a.,

Lucas C0UsTY
FRANK j. CHENEY makes oath that he Il
the scnioc partner OF tho fem OF +. !
CHENEY s. c.. doing busiucss Ia the City
OF Toledo. County anu o,nt- aivs .s..a.
--a ,h-. .-ir s-m wilt p-- -. su~, of
ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS foe each and
every case of Catarrh that cannot be cured
by the use of Halls CATAaRu CURE
FRANK j. CHENEY.
Sworn to before rae aud subscribed in
NV presence, this 9TH day of December, A
ID 1856
A W. GLEASON.
sRAL Notary Public.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
A Hard Winter.

WIFE, don't see what we are going
to do.
IIusband-What's wrong.
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
" L"HHestoD, N a.
CoIOrIesS, EInaClated, Helpless


A Complete Cure by o DIS
SARSAPARILLA.
This Is from Mr.. d. NJ Jordan, a re.
tired farmer, and one of the most re.
spected citizens OF Otsego Co, n. Y.
& Fourteen years ago / had an attack of tho
gravel, ana have since been troubled with nv
Liver and Kidneys
gradually growing worse. Three 70 ars aoo I
got down SO low t3Ht 4 could Scarcely
walk. ] looked IN Brc like a corpse than "a
LIVING being. ! had no appetite and for Ave
weeks [. nts Dotii.g bI;i Cruel. was
bnaly enact ltcd anl had no more color than A
fnnrbs statue. UpoTs SarsapAriila wa.
recommended aud I thonght I won Il try n
Before | hal flashed the iirst bottle l noticed
that | felt better suffered iess. the lnnam.
nation al tEac bladder had subsidized, The
co or began 90 returD to nay face, and I be.
gan TO ieel hua CRY. Ate. I hal taken
thrse bottles ! could eat anything without
hurting me. WAY, ! got ~ hungry that hal
10 eat > times - dag. I have now fully re.
covered, than ~ to
Hoods SarsapariIia
feel well aud am well. All VINO know
me marvel 10 sec me 80 well j. N. J pDAN.
Hood Pills are tho se 4 after dinner Pills.
Assist digestion. cure headache and Lillious1ess
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

|riarr
es ~
St.
b. N.
}. en-
| the
| ten
IN
from
too,
anne
will
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

eclai
than
he re-
| the
n OF
n OF
htion
Pow.
| and
kken.
| used
| In
] alI
lould
|g OF
D the
from
gres'
by
| also
ELI to
0 on.
] re.
con.
local
vote
| pre-.
liz Of
Sture
will
|saga
|| er' 10
b un.
rec.
I 1.-THE
hitter
with
anca
lvor,
| DO
BARS.
y are
lcral
rld's
|indi.
with
hycs.
The
hsiou
. or
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26

But why did you ever do it?' look
ing down with puzzled eyes at her
blushing face.
Because Sir Felix told me that you
had given my roses to Laura Dickson!'
'.It was false! But the idea Of being
Jealous OF poor plain Laura!'
"iou were jealous vi Sir Felix, In
spite Of his ugly red beard"
"But l thought you liked him."
And l thought you liked her."
but youxidn't?"
"But you didn't?" she echoed with
. smile.
And the next moment his arm was
around her waist. and their lips met
Lottie Smith has learned by this timc
that falling stars don't como to the
earth; but all the pleasure Of her lifo
she dates from tho day when q dia-
mond flashed in the gutter. -
Custer weekly chronicle. [volume] (Custer City, S.D.) 1890-1931, 1892-11-26
Hoods Sa.sanariIis

Hood Pills are tho 5e q after dinner Pills
Azsist digestion. cure headache aud Lilliousness
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1892-06-19

III yo' has bin shootin craps an lost de
two dollars de old woman had saved up to
buy par o. shoes, yoll h'ar ghostly foot
steps all ober de cabin fur three nights
runnin. Yo'll also h'ar from de ole woman
doorin de day.
III I had bin sorter walkin around
doorin de day an had discovered a hem
coop which promised to pan out well de
fust dark night, / should listen mighty
hard when got to bed. II heard death
tick in de wall | should take it to mean
dat I'd better let dem twenty-five chickens
alone, cause DER was a spring gun Jest in
side de doah of de coop. II didn't h'ar de
tick reckon I'd chance it, though I'd go
powerful slow an feel all around in de dark
fur dat gun.
IF white man Gums along in de mawn-
in an offers yo' dollar fur days work,
an yo' stick fur dollar an half an con-
timer to sot on de fence cause he won't
give it, yo'll go to bed dat night to hear
strange whispers all around yo'. II YOU
hssen clusly yo'n make ont dat yo' am bein
told yo'd better resign from dis club befo'
yo' git de bounced
III Samuel Shin should borry two dol
lars In cash Of me, which he can't possibly
do, an should fail to pay it back at de time
agreed upon, he'd see ghosts at night.
Dey wouldn't be ghosts from de grave
yard, but ghosts from his conscience. It's
all de work Of conscience. Oar am muffin
real about it. Yo've done sunthin mean,
an yo' feel conscience stricken ober it. No
member of dis club who keeps up his dues,
pays his debts an tries to live like decent
man need be afeared of spooks. He'll go
to bedto sleep as sound as q brick. Spooks
won't hev no use fur him.
From dis time on | shall hev an eye
out fur Brudders Watkins, Jones, Cabiff
an Toots, an fur SIGH odder members of
dis club as may take to seein ghosts an
hearin warnins. | doan say dat seem a
ghost will be considered sufficient reason
fur expulshun, but it will 20 long ways
toward maxim me feel sartin dat SIGH pus-
sons doan reflect no partickler credit on
dis club as a nashunal organizashun."
Brother Jones arose and tried to square
himself by explaining that what he took
TO be the whispers of spirit voices turned
out to be nothing but the labored breath
ing Of his brindled dog under the bed, and
that he had so reported, but Brother
Gardner raped for order and said:
"Sot down, Brudder Jonesi Oar am no
queshun befo' de house. Yo' hev heard
what had to say, an 1 hope 20 will profit
by it, same as de rest. AT de next meetin
/ shall arrange wild Sir Isaac Walpole TO
move dat bylaw No. 666 be amended to
read so dat any member seein a ghost or
bein whispered to at midnight by a speeri
shall stand accused de same as II he had
busted into de museum an stolen de sacred
skull of Cicero"
Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1892-06-19
What Allied the Cake.

It is said that good cooks, like good
nurses, are born, not made" In this
opinion lady who has recently struggled
with the ignorance and stupidity Of ser
want who was ''willin and anxious, a'am,'
fully concurs.
Now see what nice loaf of cake you
can make from this receipt, Bridget" said
the mistress one morning. Remember
the things have told you, there's no rea-
son why you shouldn't have as light loaf
of cake as anybody"
eyes, ma'am," said Bridget, an re-
member Everything, an I'll warrant I'll be
afther givin you foine loaf"
But when the loaf was at last withdrawn
from the oven by the despairing Bridget, It
presented anything but light and well
baked aspect.
what liver can be the matter wild itp"
groaned poor Bridget when she had sum-
moned her mistress to inspect the uninvit-
ing painful.
Ibid you remember to put baking pow
der in the -four, Bridget" queried the
lady.
THE bakin powder is in it all right,
ma'am," responded Bridget, but niver a
bit av -four. put in cornstarch, ma'sm,
in place av the -four"
"Cornstarchp' gasped the mistress.
'Indade, yis, ma'ami" said Bridget
you said you wanted the cake very light
and it was yourself was tellin me the other
day how much lighter cornstarch was
than f1onr, so / just put in two heapin cups
av cornstarch, ma Compan.
ion.