The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-15
Downfall of a Proud Fork.

A knife, a fork, and spoon were
Ia rown together upon the kitchen table
by a careless servant. The fork eyed
his companion with disdain, and began
talking in a very patronizing manner.
How dreadfully dull you must find
life, now that you are SO out of the
swim." he said to the spoon.
"Why, in what way do you mean that
am out of the swim ?" queried the
spoon, in a quiet voice.
80, you are comparatively little used
nowadays" answered the fork loftily.
Time was when the knife, fork and
spoon were quite important in their way
but now the fork is the only really nee
essary table implement"
How perfectly absurd such a state
ment is :" cried the knife, Indignantly.
" But it is quite like your egotism. Who
ever heard you mentioned save as second
to me? A knife and a fork people
say, never a fork and a knife That
shows where your place is in the estima-
ton of the public"
40, that is merely habit Of speech
into which people have fallen" returned
the fork. 4" 1t does rot alter facts. You
very well know that you often lie unno-
ticed and unused through an entire din
ner, or until the cheese come in. In
deed, yesterday you were left in the
drawer, while 1 did the honors OF
luncheon that our mistress gave to one
of her friends"
You forget" gently interposed the
spoon: was there, and saw the lady
look about as if seeking something. /
am quite sure she missed you"-address-
ing the knife with a sympathetic air
which showed her good breeding. al
once heard lady remark that one felt
very uncomfortable at the table without
knife, whether one needed it or not"
i would rather my absence than my
presence were regretted, cried the knife,
fairly glistening with rage, and casting
cutting glance at the fork.
90, well, when you are wanted it is
only to prepare things for me. You are
a sort of underservant TO make things
easy for me" said the fork, aggravating-
ly, and adding: " am the only one who
can be called a real table aristocrat."
" / am sure your family is much newer
than mine" retorted the knife; can
trace my pedigree back as far as history
goes That is more than you can do"
Yes, but if you go back very far you
ind that your ancestors were mere butch
ers. / should not want such pedigree
myself. 1 should much prefer to be re-
cent and refined, like the fork family"
" And I do not know why you should
try to hold your head above the spoon, 3"
continued the knife, now inturn defend
ing his sympathetic companion. "Who-
ever heard of a souvenir fork and the
whole world is mad about souvenir
spoons"
and he began - make great noise and
fuss, when the mistress entered the kitch-
en-.
" What is all this rattling of the silver
that l hear, Bridget?" she asked. and
Immediately she cried out: o here you
have thrown fork down with a knife
and spoon. l have told you over and
over again not to do that. Just see how
the knife and spoon are scratched by tn e
fork This pearl-handled knife was one
ola set given me as a wedding present,
and this spoon is an heirloom. l value
them both highly. By the way, l lee
that the plate is wearing off this fork,
Bridget. You may put it aside among
the cooking utensils"
So the proud fork was thereafter kept
in kitchen-drawer and put to menial
uses. 1t never again appeared among
the silver and cut-glass.-Harper's Young
People.