Delaware gazette and state journal. (Wilmington, Del.) 1883-1902, 1892-01-28
EVENING ECHOES.

Cun pun III your room 10 adQ To youl
comfort? New Boarder-I notice there
Is no thermometer on the stove; how dc
you know when 1t is goingP
A young man who was fond of champagne
One day landed way down in Magne,
When he learned with contrition
That the state was Prohibition,
He fled, and was meier seen agagne.-Er.
Sunday-school Teacher (sadly)-"I'm
afraid Johnny. that / will never meet
| you in heaven" Johnny-"Why? what
have you been doing now Harper's
| Bazaar
Jack Blower told me the other day
that he rides great deal" "Well, for
| once he told the truth. You see he lives
IN Harlem fiat and works in Produce
Exchange office" Puck.
What do we get from iodine?"
Inquired the tutor placid.
II think" replied a brilliant youth,
"'Tis idiotic acd.n
The tutor frowned and said, '.A-hum!
Young friend, have you been taking some?''
-IHo,macenticdt Era.
My cook left to-day in spite of all /
could do" "What was the trouble ~
"The children annoyed her. | offered
to kill the children, but she was afraid
the authorities would detain her as a
witness."-N. J.. Daily Ne,os.
In recent poem Ella Wheeler Will
cox speaks of "the wistful mouths of
unkissed nuns" VIII Ella kindly send
the post office address of these ladies to
the Diseourager of Wistfulness, care of
this ofiice.?- Rochester Post Express
Wait on the Lord and keep His way,
and lie shall exalt thee to inherit the
land" Watch your hat and overcoat (;
the proprietor is not responsible for
| them. These are the inscriptions on
two placards that hang near each other
on the walls of a Chestnut street lunch
house. Philadelphia Record
| House Hunter-"Do you live here,
sonny?" Little Boy-"Y essir. In that
house next above that empty one" II
sec. Do you-er--have nice neighbors?"
| eYessii. No matter how mean we is to
EN-, they don't say a word. Come
around and sec me break winder.'--
| Good Meas.
II wonder why l can't make nv kite
fly" walled the little brother of the
high school girl 1T looks 10 me-. re.
piled Mildred, ",ls though its caudai an.
pendage were disproportionate to its
superficial area" II don't think that's
IT. said Jim; 81 think its tail is too
light
First Citizen-Strange, isn't it, that
the inhabitants of China should maltreat
the missionaries sent to them from
Christian countries? Second Citizen
Simply incomprehensible. Hello |
What's the row down the street?
First Citizen-Oh, nothing but d lot Of
flowing boys pounding Chinee.--
Good Ncacs.
lie was in the pantry trying TO open
can of tomatoes and making a good
deal of unnecessary noise about it.
what in the world is the matter ?n
demanded his wife from the kitchen
What are you trying to open that can
of tomatoes with ?" "Can-opener. Of
COURSE" he growled back. "Do YOU
suppose ! was trying to open it with
my teethW "No; | thought, perhaps,
Judging from your language, you were
trying to open it with prayer -Neso
York Sun.
A physician, who spent some time in
the countries bordering on the Gulf of
Mexico, found curious body Of men
among the natives called Curodos de
Calebra, or the safe from vipers. Having
been inoculated with the poison of the
serpents they were proof against their
yenomous bites. The incubation was
made with the venom tooth Of VIPER
and the bulb of native plant called
mano del sapo (toad's hand). The pre-.
ventiye incubation has been an old Gus
tom among the natives of that region.
The desirability Of care in expression
can hardly be too forcibly impressed
upon those who write advertisements.
circulars and public announcements Of
all sorts. A very peculiar effect was
produced by the following announce.
ment, contained in the advertisements
OF county fair: "Among other at
tractive features of this great fair there
will be highly amusing donkey races
and pig races. Competition in these
two contests open to citizens of the
county only YOUTHS Companion.
A horse jockey in Aroostook county
lMe.), repented of his sharp practices,
Joined the church, and announced that
II he had taken unfair advantages of
any one in horse trade he would be
clad to square things by paying the
difference in cash. 1t was scarcely day
hight the next morning when neighbor,
who considered that he had been
roasted in swap with the newly
converted jockey, made his appearance
at the latters door, remarking that he
mad come early to avoid the rush"
The jockey promptly settled the case.
Phrases and slang terms are fire.
quently born of interesting episodes, as
witness the following: Peter the Great,
while off driving in the neighborhood
of Moscow on one occasion, was seized
with the pangs of hunger. "What have
vein the hamper 2" he asked of his aide.
"There is but one candle left, your
majesty replied the aide, s'but think
| can exchange il for fowl ut the next
farmhouse, if you wish" "Do so,n re.
piled the car, s'for | am famished, and
do not care for light luncheon" The
aide laughed, and, as he had surmised,
managed the exchange; but tho bird
was found to be unusually tough. II
do not think, Vosky," said the EN-
peror, later-.I do not think the game
was worth the candle. ~ Ha,per's Bazaar.
The account of the girl who laughed
herself to death in Ohio is not without
precedent in Massachusetts. Several
years ago Farmer Allen" and "Brother
Potter" as they were called David
Allen and II. X. Potter, used 10 travel
together as Republican stump speakers.
They had a great fund of stories, and
We're accustomed To tell them in a
comical way. They spoke at meeting
in Dedham, and Farmer Allen set one
Of the audience laughing SO that the
man could not stop. He was carried
home, and literally laughed himself to
nnath He nvas n Demnnrnt To-, ,,tn Ia