New-York tribune., 1892-01-08
THE TALK OF THE DAY.

THE TALK OF THE DAY
A Boston physician thinks that humane people who
are fond of raising funds for the unfortunate In
foreign lands might more wisely do something Tor tho
consumpuves Of their own country. In New-England
there are least 1900 consumptives half OF whom
might be benefited II they could afford TO live In
another climate And the same thing Is true of tho
whole region, which he calls the "consnmpiye beit'
He thinks that all consumpives ought 10 go TO
New Mexico where consumption is altogether unknown
among the natives and he calls on the churches to
start consumptive emigration movement TO that
Territory.
A shoe manufactures OF New gland, becoming dis
satisfied with the efforts of his saesmen started over
the rouc OF one of them without his knowledge, to
what he could do In the way OF selling goods. Ho
didn't meet With success and at last on lea ming
from old customer that he was too late. the order
having been placed he offered to take the order at
cent per pair less if the dealer would eounteimand
s Efe me H"q rcinrnd With "i Se feeling that his
journey had been an entire failnre. But he dis
covered. lOOing at his correspondence that 1T was
an order taken By his own salesman which he had
bribcd tho dealer to repudate. Then he sohloquihed
in language more emphatic than orthodox-lsh"c ana
Leather Reporter.
There are two Kansas Citys one Missouri and ons
across tho river in Kansas. But according TO Tho
Kansas City starr they really only one city. IL
says: "Tbe practical union Of the two cities has pro
crossed because II natural that ii should men own
property in both cities; men sleep in Kansas CITY, Mo-,
and work in Kansas City, Kan. and men have their
homes in Kansas City. Kan. and their places Of bus-
ness in Kansas City, Mo- Morning and evening the
cars are crowded with workers OF every grade going
both ways. 1t is difficult to tell which crowd is the
larger"
lie said not Word paw asked Tommy look
ing up from his book, show do you pronounc"
Does II refer to the lightning. 10 man - inter.
rpted Tommys mother. and the paterna parsnt buried
his bushing nose deeper In his overwhelmingly
Journal.
A California prune grower has refused Offer from
Bordeaux firm for his prune crop In sacks. They
would Of course be repacked and shipped as French
prunes. But the Californian means to improve hb
style Of packing and make the profit himself
song OF THE TYPEWRITER GIRL.
ats clclity click. clicdty click
TIL the very sound Of 10 makes sick;
'Clckty click from morn I'LL night. 49,.
Aud then in my dreams until broad daynght;
'ClchN click my living to VIM,
TIL my finger tips are all worn thin;
30 sang pretty typewriter girl.
.Clclity click with the senior pard
Eyelng me over his spectacles hard;
'Clckty click with the junior pard
whispering, Really, don't work so hard;
'Cchty click till my eyes are blurred
Apd can SEQ n Of my my R6ss Rotss ny word
And wish there was never typewriter girl.
'CIcldty click Is the only song
Th 1 1h II ny a5nsh 49ue e 5sa ss may Say' .hs ons
Sil the weary fingers 10 rest NAV take.
II one girl dies trerc are others, you know;
St,o TS TSS@ words I'm she Ss'd died on Of my the eeS
(New-Haven Palladium.
Last June Young man was arrested in NatCk;
Mass because he would not pay his poll tax amount
ing 10 81 and he kept in jail since at sn
expense to the taxpayers Of 81 10 per week The
town is losing money on the transaction but It Is vim
dlcating an eternal principle WITH great success.
Beguiling the Infant Mind.-sunday-school supenn-
tendent-Mr Bibk. inquire what place this BOOK
entitled The Cory Pirate OF the -Four Seas has IN
1t Is merely a disguised study of geography. Scot
indianapolis Journal.
The Youths Companion" tells story, the scene cf
which is laid in Kansas. man Of somewhat
Questionable character had died, and the ncareSe
preacher summoned to preach funeral sermop,s
Not knowing the man, tho preacher conentcd himself
with few general remarks the solemn nature Of
occasion, and then said he would be glad to have
any Of the company present say word about the
dead man, il they desired. No moved spoke,
and again the preacher extended invitation TO th1
company to offer remarks, but again the invitation
met with silence. Finally, old farmer, who In
the corner OF the front room. rose and said: II no
one has any remarks to make about the deceased,
would like to make few remarks about the Sub
Treasury plan.
A Georgia editor, who evidently means business,
When NEXT oqr patrons We shall dun,
We viii not longer trihe.
We start the year right with ono
Erstcass repeating nne.'
ATLANTA Constitution.
II IS not always expedieut for physician to make
c0nfdant OF his patient the following story shows.
A celebrated German physician called upon
10 treat an aristocauc lady, whose only trouble was
that she ate too much and took exercise Instead
Of telling her. however, he said 10 her: Arise at
o'clock take walk IN the park for one hour then
drink a cup Of tea, then walk another hour and take
a cup of chocolate. Take breakfast at So Her con-
dition improved viSiby, until one fine morning the
carriage OF the baroness seen to approach tho
phy>icans residence Mt lightning speed. The patient
dashed mp to the doctors Office, and on his appearing
on the scene shs gasped out: "Oh doctor, took
the chocolate first Then drive homo as fast as
you cam calculated the astutc disciple Of Escuapus
rapidly writing prescription, and take this emetic
The tea must be underneath The grateful patient
complied she is sdn improving.
HI, Rcvcncc-~I am sorry Mr.; Percollum. bnt
shah need your services after this week., SAID the
editor of The Monthly SparlIer'
was about tO make the same remark sr,' re-
ned Mr. percollum. a" My uncle has bought this
MAGAZINE and given the management OF things 10 me-
Yon Mill not need nv services, Mr.. Abel, but shall
need yours How would advance Of $50 month
In Your salary strike You $50,
" fIne author Of this beautiful and touching little
t on several other paper, and I'll have rejected II rs
TOO wildly absurd and mprObabe.)-lCmcago Tribune
GOOD MEDICINE; But WILL IT CUREl
From The Baltimore American.
senator Morrill, administered a dose OF financial
wisdom To the rec silver In the Senate yesterday
which was 50 well coated with his sprghtly Wit and