Sullivan republican. [volume] (Laporte, Pa.) 1883-1896, 1892-05-06
HUMOR OF THE DAY.

A tell-tale-Ine UeSSier StOTv.-Llle.
The rabbit-hunter is hare Drained
fellow.-Rochester Post.
Outside of diplomatic circles the fish
cries question is often purely one of YER
acity.
The time when woman has no mercy
is when she gets mouse in trap
Rams Horn.
''My IDEAS" insisted the architect,
"were all right. am the victim of mis-
construction"
1t is an aggravation for hungry
tramp to find only fork in the road
Texas Siftings.
Teacher-"Haus name three beasts of
prey" Hans-"Two lions and tiger"
Texas Siftings.
One trouble with the world is that SO
many have more reputation than char
acter.-Ram's Horn.
The physician is she man who tells you
you need change and then takes all you
have.-Elmira Ga cite.
The man with a "splitting headache"
ought to get n job at makiRG.-rails.
Binghamtou Republicans.
az hear Cholly Slimpate is sick. Have
you had any intelligence from him2"
"Not a CLEAN. Chicago Tribune.
The only way to win in an argument
with woman is to walk off when you
have stated your side of it.-Atchison
Globe.
Mr.. Gurley-"Are your family related
| to the Scaddses, of Philadelphia Miss
Scadds (haughtily)-"No; they are re-
lated to us. Life.
Edith-"Lord English said my image
was photographed on his mind" Ethel
-"Yes, photographs are usually made
| on blanks. Yale Record.
Fair, rosy cheeks had Kitty Grimes.
Bright eyes aud open brow,
She jun oed the rope 1000 times
She isn't jumping now.
Chicago Tribune
Bagley (at church fair)-"Let's go up
and have that pretty girl tell our for
tunes" Braee-"Not any; what's the
usel Don't l know Pm broke. -
| Graphic.
Sharpson-'.old fellow, you look
seedy. 1t is time you had new suit. F"
Phlatz-'I know 1t, but my tailor re-
fuses to-h'm--to renew the modus Vi
vendi. Chicago Tribune.
Every pretty surset," he remarked.
eyes" she replied. II don't wonder
that people write about the shades Of
evening. hal no idea that there were
so many different shades or that they
matched SO nicely"
Jeans (the porter-"Beg pardon,
sir; have bad news for you. Mr.. Ca.h-
box died this morning. Old Skinner
"Dlcd this morning. Now that's just
like Cashbox. lie knew this was thu
busy season. Life.
Yes" said young Rud .kins, who
sat in calm disregard of the clock, II
may say that | am fixture In our office
now" II know, Mr.. Rudgkins. she
answered, gently, shut this isn't ;oul
office, you know. Lansing News.
Mrs. Brush-"iIas the Hanging Com.
! mitteo decided about your picture vet ~
Brush-"Yes." Mrs. Brush-"A Are they
going to hang III" brush (dubiousl- =
"I heard the Chair ran say he thought
hanging was too good for it."-Brook.
lyn Life.
The Lectnrer-"My hearers, I shall
have to ask your indulgence for f.w
! minutes. forgot my manuscript, and
have sent my little boy for It." Ills sou
mounting rcstrum Gin loud tone. y
"Mamma couldn't fnd the wrltin', bui
here's the took yeu copied Il from. -
Tid Bits.
OVERRIDING It; Fond Mother-ssI ID
so hope that George has studied har.l at
college, ! have tried 20 Impress npon
his mind the value ai q liberal educa
tion." Fathef--'sI am afraid, my dear
that You have rather everdone tie mat
ter. had TO send him check for ESQ
to-day. Funny Folks.
The other day y. the bohemian
on receiving some money frcm q sIel
uncle, took u into his head TO square ef
some OF his most pressing debts. n,
first called ai his tsllaFs aud hear.l ,ha
the poor man hal Just died. IIis widow
all IN tears, desired IN kaow the visitor,
efFaud, ~ have eome 20 nav nv Hill.
he simply fenllea. "Ahla sobhesl ouI
the widow, IT NJ poor husband h.
only lived I'LL lhis mefalag, the sheel
have hrouahf him round