Grand Rapids herald. [volume] (Grand Rapids, Mich.) 1892-1959, 1892-05-22

M 6vsn y ~ vk6s Mig 70 that a
mankind may start IN square again.
~. OIInn1fhnn fnvon also the ap-
p0Eeinnmenf Ct brains II the came my
Z pomfhs. oGharvise III able IN would
I'D ~ otheg folks oss u thely money
sDn6n n > vssk. al al thin spportiou-
Dent would have 70 b gops through
VII again. He doss not know yet very
fully how hs viii even up the gray mat
Tar business. but he thinks II can Be done.
He claims that when surgeons are able
% opsn The skuu Of foolish person that
has fnilsd 70 grow. thus giving ROOM 10
the brain 90 that the idiotic. BY having .
gore a. . gussrt pus into . skuil. have
bssn able To almost think inside OF .
Gssk. vhsesas thsy f0russly did not
know enough to ache when they got
hurt. he thinks the day b not far distant
when the man who knows too much NAV
b made 10 ''whAek up,s - Is were. with
the mental psapsr. Proper o0iciah viii
60 around with brain tester for people
to think against. and by means Of .
graduated scale tho Official can tell
whether man knows more o. Less than
the Law allows.
In this way the smart Aleck who knows
IL AL. and who tells his parents how to
grow mp 10 be good men and women,
viii be- compelled to fork over some Of
his ability to the poor fellow who has
failed ~ sand FOUNDER.
Mr.. OHoosihan favors moro rigid mar
riage laws, especially requiring thoee
who marry to refrain from shooting each
other within the inst ysax, and also ~
strAining then from pubsishing their
divorce proceedings, 20 that children ara
liable 10 get hold oe them. He believes
In having suitable places. with sanitary
plumbing connected with them. where
people may go to get their divorce bust
ness and soilcd linen attended to.
Asked his opinion regarding English
humor as compared with Irish and
American humor. he said:
"The English humor Of today is Of q
restful character and used mostly as q
means of relaxation. In the days of
Thacksray and Dickens Englishmen
seemed to enjoy mirth provoking
humor Of the American order, il seems
TO mo. bat now it runs. largely 70 puns
and petty larceny. II is asadder humor
than ours, . good style to adopt during
Lent. English humor with sulphur and
treacle can do no harm. think.
IAN Englishman csme over on Gu
harder the other day, and the passengers
put the customs officers ON to him Be.
cause he seemed to have swollen mp SO
rapidly tho day before reaching New
York. But how do you suppose he god
out Of II? He told tho officers that the
day before be landed tho passengers got
him to talking on tho tariff, and before
he had an idea what he was doing he had
enlarged upon it,
"He turned out to Be the song and
dance editor on the staff of Punch, who
was coming over to America for his
health, also for tho purpose of organic.
ing . school Of what is called White
chapel humor, which is quite popular in
England now"
The Cincinnati geological works pos
sesses the tallest and hsndsomest giraffe
grandifora that there Is in America, so
am told. Itcan easily eat out of third
story window, and belongs to Rescue
Hook and Ladder company, No. 8, OF
Cincinnati.
. Tho elephant was feeling very poorly
when ! saw him. His skin looked dry
and feverish. When he walked his over
slls ratified together like tim clothes
fastened together with wire.