The morning news., 1892-03-18
Gazeway Hartrldee's Hit.

10 politics and in religion; among whom IL 1
may be excused from singing out one from the
distinguished group, is an illustrious statesman
the worthy idol of New Yorks democracy and
the rising hope of his party everywhere, who by
the force OF his prevailing genius, aided and
sustained by the highest judicial tribunal OF his
state. has made the Senate and Assembly OF his
proud commonwealth solidly democratic for all
time 10 come-or most all.
Here let me pause to pay passing tribute to
that majestic tribunal Of Justice. Though COM
posed offiye democrats and two republicans
the majority OF its members. rising above all
wretched considerations of mere party inter-
ests. seated democrats wherever they found
them-do not misunderstood me-wherever
they found them shut out by fraud and vio-
clamor and the loud murmurs of those voters
OF doubtful sex-of the epicene species-who
having passed the ado .escence of the tadpole.
and not yet having attained the stature Of
frog are delignated in political science as mug
wuups Not that l would revie the mug
wumps; far from it. The mugwump is pure
and patriotic creature, gentle and peaceful; an
EleTy Anderson on wings; q sweet. .Bunthorne,
fearing to soil his lily soul 10 the vile ordure of
uDclean politics.
And every one will say,
As be walks his iowery way,
"lf things are not pure enough for him
That are pure emo gh for you and me.
Tren what particularly pure young man
This pure youneamau must be-"
One painful fact stares me straight in the
fac. am summoned to speak for rude and
ugly men only, while in full view Of the in
splritinR presence of beautiful womanhood. Is
not this enough to cast shadow and a silence
over these otherwise halcyon and vociferous
proceedings? You can scarcely realize what
you miss. All, I tell you
miss is as good as a mile,
kiss twice as good as q smile.
Not to miss any kiss,
But to kiss every miss
Will turn miles
Into smiles
And smiles into kisses
From misses.
For the maiden who'll smile
Is a miss worth the while
OF your walking a mile;
But the damsel you kiss
Is worth two of the miss
Who's only as good as a mile
While cOngratulatIng you on the presence Of
Rstateman whom Georgia will delight to honor
on or about June 2i next, suffer me to indulge
tender alluson to another famous New Yorker,
whom Savannah has entertained in the past,
whom you do rot happen TO number among
your guests tonight. In rehearsing CONVEX
sation had with the great man in question--yet
among the greatest of American citizens-I do
not mean to give you fhrtive hyperdermic iu-
lection of a political anodyne. l merely desire
TO contribute page 10 impartial history. In
order to be historically accurate one must be a
learned philosopher or good democrat. am
both.
Hurrying through one of the private parlors
of the Fifth Avenue hotel, some months ago,
ran INTO the arms OF an ex- President ! recog-
nzed him By his deep chest and great breadth
Of mind Recovering myself ventured to ask
him il his tariff issue had healed up yet
No he said, II think it will remain open
until late in 90"
Mr.. President" said |. 'don't you think you
are making mountain out of a mole hill?"
Your language. he responded in his simple
Anglo Latin, lis absurd. However you are be-
rayed into very natural error by the in
iuence OF inexsct but popular phraseoloEy
You cannot make mountain out of a mole
bill, nor President neither, he murmured re-
decuvely, using the double negative by way Of
in anchovy. "Hou remind me TO say" he pro-
,eeded, by your misuse of popular phrases,
low silly is the apothegm vulgarly ascribed to
Me, A public Office is mere public confidence
H game What did say was, "A public Office
Saprivate trust with which no government
aas the right to Interfere"
The gentleman refer to is a pure and promi-
cent statesman. His official integrity is SO
'rict that he even refuses to 90 unobserved into
'le lobby Of a hotel.
And now to turn to the sentiment of the toast
Ye who enter here Leave hope of flight be-
1nd am sorry thus to be shut out from the
anctuary and refuge which might be reached
BY tight But lam not disheartened nor terri
led For years | have confronted tue same
LANCER and the same toast. And at the
lose OF each annual banquet l discover
NE toast conveys an untruth. find can fly,
70 70 other agency OF locomotion being LETT to me-
ms year the chairman of the stewards re-
llestei me if was fatigued with the iteration
the beautiful sentiment to which am
peaAng to change it. l suggested the substi-
9tion Of bring hope Of flight with you," In
oace OF leave hope of flight behind" but the
Nfection was not accepted, yoI will observe.
sui, as you see, do not refuse the permission
3Nndly given me to wander from my text at
heasure and without restriction
me language of the toast, how licentious and
Mcean Is its invitation On behalf of your
!les;i. and include all of them, invited and
HhVlted, but more especially on behalf of
@s VINO have refused to take their seats at
ler hospltable table, l will saywe came not here
ggeuJoy feast of venison and a flow of WINE.
nule we may delight in the flowers that in
oNcGte the senses, we infinitely prefer those
"a ,Isr blossoms Of pure understanding and recti-
4l sentiment. We love better to wash down
aeieclual viands and mental liquids. The
@ll VINE OF the understanding is said to run
s"at the sptgot OF speech, but my observation
Sa9d 9d the impression is deepened by my per
~ual experience tonight, understanding and
rsech both run out at the spigot of the wine
ent, leaving only lees and dregs behind
,p p1Ae confess am governed by uncontrol-
. ,se laoits of excessive moderation and ex-
Jaue aostemlousness, yet looking down upon
sae sllnlnR rivers of sparkling champagne
B,slng through still lakes OF Sauterne and
IISSuhdy, can appreciate the reverie OF an
j ecotch character who standing on the bor-
i,s ~. Caledonian stream and gazing down
rs. rS.a ne running water with the eye of man
Ia I% thoroughly distrusted it, viewed as bever-
~ 'SSrrnurmured to himself.
s mere ye go, blubblin' to yer ain annihilation
,,d .le loch yonder. It's little l know that's
.tv soo9t ye in yer unconvairted state. fere
ip e1i|o2,. o, human fe, they say. ! tax Up my
rol l az a till ye're heated wi fire an sweet
see sol WI sugar an strengthened wi whisky, an
rs1, {{e re q type o toddy, an human life q
slactY" '''-'e'N'A ~ '1' " - - '-0'
uostgre conclude these rambling observa
Esjou uesre 70 utter some words OF practical
M plo la ana solemn warning. In the Episco
r'cVI[ulch, OF which am an humble and con
5rss, 5rols IS member, it is tue practice when Q
81 5SH,s exalted to the highest ecclesiastical
/ IL gr,.uo Lor fellow bishop to instruct him ia the
wtJ%s ana graces OF q Christian prelate
.eitt Oy the way, do not necessarily
ttaeir pious luster on the character of the
s61,e. himself. In the coming fall the junior
HI hgo from New YORK win surrender his seat
msy senate Honorable sir, fearing that
net ~ ~ y De able 10 accept place In your cabi
III av6 eouncllors, as fellow statesman, now
III 5cs,stH5se sen OF the freedom OF this couvivia
as'fe-1u % give you some serious advice on
1.4itentlon.
tnafsst, Ia order 90 insure your retirement
and - stately aggregation Of silver kingi
sanste eliy miliionairas, the United States
3eltr very senator IN popular estimation
.hat,iHl iHl 7 hQnaife, some having grown 20 rich
M '+Nf 90 not even draw M the salary that