Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-10-27
Tea-Tabis salad.


THE sculptor fishes for fame when
he makes a cast.-Yonkers Gazette.
A CAMPAIGN lie may be nailed, but
caucuses are bolted. -Somerville Jour
nal.
= OF course young woman expects
to be killing when she puts on kilt
Fun.
IT doesn't take much OF hunter
to bag his trousers. -Glens Falls Re-
publican.
A WHISKY STRAIGHT" is decided to
be an unmixed evil. -Binghamton
Republican.
@AYEsHA" is the title of a good
poem, though it sounds like sneeze.
-Picayune.
A MAN who shutters conveys his
thoughts by limited express. Wash
ington Star.
FANNY is a beautiful name for
wife who delights to raise breeze.
News.
MYSTERY always has a delicious
charm unless man is jealous
Somerville Journal.
THE humorists of this country
seem to have made butt Of the
goat.-Philadelphia Record.
SUCH thing as a strike by waiter
girls was unknown until they put on
suspenders.- Tribune.
No WONDER the music of tho hand
organ is sharp-think how thorough
ly it is ground. -Elmira Gazette.
THERE couldn't be a more appro-
pirate insignia for a prize fighter
than belt. Philadelphia Times.
MANY a man thinks he can read a
woman like a book until he tries to
shut her up.-Philadelphia Times.
OF course it is only natural that
the engaging girl should be the first
to be engaged. -Somerville Journal.
A POET compares love to a river.
Because people are all the time fall,
ing it, we suppose. -Yonkers States
man.
the ring slightly disfgured; but his
dramatic inability remains unim-
paired.
"DID you know his business had
run DOWN." Il suppose so. heard
he was going to wind it up."-Nasts
Weekly.
THE alligator gets very little credit
In this cold, unfeeling world. Every
body calls him hard case.-Lowell
Courier.
IF every love affair ended in mar
riage there Is not man in the world
who would not be Mormon. --Atchi-
son Globe.
WATCHER are made in heaven, but
love is made right out on the summer
hotel piazza every night. -Yonkers
Statesman.
THE man who can't cut long story
short generally has the same trouble
with his store account.--Binghamton
Republican.
In the spring woma Shoes the
hens out OF the garden, and in the
fall man shoes the boys. Bingham
ton Republican.
A MAN who gets choleric over his
collar-button has not necessarily got
any comma-shaped bacilli about him.
Boston Transcript.
FERGUSON says he wishes the law
that compels the saloons to shut up
at IL o'clock applied to his wife,
Binghamton Republican.
WE can't save much by employing
electricity to do our work because Of
the consequent increase in current
expense Gazette.
A SUFFERER from a severe cough
says that his complaint has one of
the modern mprovements-a pneu-
matte tire.-Lowell Courier.
THERE are lots of men who will
consider that you are treating them
warmly enough if you buy them hot
Scotches. -Binghamton Leader.
THOUGH man fancies that his wit
is like cutlery, he makes mistake if
he undertakes to sharpen it by con-
slant grinding. Washington Star.
II was really the sailor on watch
who discovered America. Then he
called "Land ho." and gave Columbus
chance to discover it.-Picayune.
WE wish we were as popular as
the woman is with the children when
she gets down the cake and takes
knife in her hand.-Atchison Globe.
HUeeER-What would you do if
you were me? Mugger-I don't know,
I'm sure. i don't believe I'd bear it
as well as you. -Binghamton Leader.
LOUISVILLE has a "girl preacher"
aged IA, whose professional card
bears the legend, Sunday meetings
for men only. indianapolis Jour
nal.
"IT's perfectly clear that there's
woman in the case" said the police
man when he found a female tramp
hiding in dry goods box.-Buffalo
Express.
RIvERs-The cholera bacillus, It
seems, is shaped like a comma. Banks
why don't the authorities
knock its tail off and bring it to
full stop?-Chicago Tribune
A SOUVENIR postage stamp for the
Worlds Fair is among the probablli-
ties Whether a premium is to be
stuck on it, like the souvenir half
dollars, is not yet determined.-P
adelphia Ledger.