davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-26

A Reporter Who Sought Ingenious
Ways 70 Beat the Law"

In one respect the average man hes not
changed even little bit IN the last thirty
years; he hates now just as much as he
ever did that long ago serving on . jury,
and will get out Of the duty If he caa BY
hook OF crook. John Stanton, reporter
who, when the century was that much
younger, did really humorous work tor
the Brooklyn Eagle over the nom de
plume "Corry O'L4nus,' bad peculiar
aversion to jury service 80 strong that ne
could not be satisfied with obtaining ex-
emption on professional grounds but
would seek ingenious ways to 'Sbeat the
law" whenever he was served with the
ohnoxious notice reminding him Of his
duty.
On one occasion he presented himself
before the deputy commissioner Of jurors,
who sat in state adjudicating with severe
maeisterial solemnity upon the many
pleas for exemption presented by men
who felt as John did about the law, when
this scene occurred.
Deputy (glancing at his paper and
frowning from force of habit We'll any
reason why you should not serve as a
jarora f4 e8tg
Stanton-Eh2
Deputy Qouder) ANY reason why you
shouldn't serve2 9sk fA
Stanton (curving his right hand about
his ear, and with an expression of eager
interest on his face)-Wlll you be 80 good
rs to speak little louder.
Deputy Cycling SO that he is red in the
face and breaks collar button with the
swelling of his neck) us there any reason
why you should not serve as a juror
Stanton-No, sir. No reason whatever.
Deputy-Ain't you little hard Of
hearings
Stanton -Eh7
Deputy (exerting himself and getting
mad)-Ain't you deaf.i ns&
Stanton Cooking as innocent as clam)
Il beg your pardon, but may trouble
you to repeat that9 3
Deputy (howling and breaking into
perspiration) You're deaf.
Stanton-Oh, no. Not at all; not at all
The deputy gasped with amazement and
indignation at this audacious denial, and
when he recovered his breath sufficiently
to speak, shrieked: well, think you
ure; and ID deaf, too"
"Eh?" responded Stanton, with look
Of placid unconsciousness.
you're excused" vociferated the Off
Ger, In q tone that made the windows
rattle.
II beg your pardon, repeated Stanton
again, with hand up to an ear, shut L
The exhaustedsand exasperated deputy
sprang to his feet, waving his arms and
hands wildly towards the door, and bel
lowed with all the force of his lungs:
"Go way! Get out! Shoe! Never come
back! You're excused forever"
Stanton looked at him with apparent
surprise and doubt, seemed gradually to
catch his meaning, then bowlpg politely,
said, Thank you," and went out
And he had told nothing but the truth,
strictly the truth, for his hearing was then
perfect-which it was not years later.
But there is question for casuists: Did
he lie or notl-Albany On. " Press.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-26
THE POLICE GAZETTE

Is the Only illustrated paper in the world
containing all the latest sensational and
sporting news. No Saloon Keeper. Barber
or Club Room can afford to he without 1t.
1t always makes friends wherever It goes.
Mailed to any address in the United States.
One Year $500
Six Months $50
Three Months. ...-......-..... %
Send Five Cents for sample copy.
RICHARD X. FOX,
Fra nklIn square. New York city.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-26
Public Notice.

MY wife. Clara Fulford. having left my
bed and board without cause or proyoca-
ton and against my wish. hereby warn
all persons against trusting or giving her
credit on my account, as l will not be re-
sponsible for or pay any bills contracted
by her after the date of this notice.
FRANK FULFORD.
Ketchum, Idaho, Feb. 20, 1892
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-26

EntcrurasanT Young AGnns True / c. Instructed
md started me- worked steadily and made money faster
ehsn expected became able to buy island and bud
emstl summer hotel II don't succeed At that will g
70 work again the business In which made my money
True - Cot Shall instruct and start yon roaasfI
II ve DO and II you work ndu strously you will in due
time be able buy island and build hotel you wish
to Money BE- earned new line OF work. rap
and IN their own localities wherever they live Any one
DO the work Easy to learn Wefurnsh everything
TO the work entirely lead brings wonderful suc
orery worker. Beginners are earning RON ~ 20
Renee We furnish You the yon
FREE This ago Of marvellous things, and here u
smother great n.eful wealth giving wonder Great gains
will reward industrious worker wherever yoa A.:
wonderful work Deay means much money lost "a
you No 70 explain here 61t yoa ~! write - "a
TRUE Il CO.. Box l00s AuGusta. 4alae
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-26
No More Baldheada,

An Irish locksmith of this city has Il
recipe for making hair grow where it once
grew, but has disappeared. He asserts
that his home made hair restorer, if
creased on short hair mattress worth
$40, will in two weeks transform the mat
tress into a long-haired mattress worth
$50; that if it be slneared over cured
ham before you 60 to bed the cook will
have to scrape the hog hair from the piece
Of pork next morning before she can slice
apiece for breakfast.
He lost all Of his own hair by reason Of
an attack of pneumonia. The hair salye
brought it all back, 80 that he has it cut
every full moon. The recipe is simple.
You take the sole of an old shoe. Be sure
the shoe is old. The sole of new shoe
does not contain the requisite attractive
powers, and is, besides, too expensive. An
English shoe, says he, is the best of all
an old English shoe. This sole of an old
shoe you burn until it is we'll charred
Then grind it up into gray dust. The
grayness comes perforce. You can use
the family coffee mill to do the grinding,
| suppose. Next get some fresh unsalted
butter. Oleomargarine will not do and
butter made from goat milk is barred.
Mix the ground shoe sole with enough
butter to make the paste about the con-
slstency of blacking when ready for shoes
Apply Il IS paste to the hairless desert
Then sit down ard listen for the cracking
OF the returning hair.
The locksmith swears by st. Patrick
and st. Giles that Mexicans use this
preparation to bring the hair back upon
the skins of horses and cattle that have
been branded. The only danger in its
use is the chance of getting some of the
paste on the hand in applying it. And
heavy hair on the palm of society mans
hand is generally more undesirable than
want of it on the top of his head.
New York Commercial Advertiser.
IN writing up the burglary said the
excited caller" you can say the thieves
in their hurry overlooked $3.50 worth Of
jewelry and solid silver plate 10 one of
the Closets"
might not that bring the burglars to
yeur house second timea" suggested
the city editor.
~ don't care If il does" exclaimed the
other. ~ don't want the public to get
the impression that gang Of robbers can
60 through my house and emily find $25
worth Of stuff worth stealing"
Judge-You are charged with habitual
drunkenness. What have you to say for
yourselfa Prisoner Nothing, yer honor
only habitual thirst.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
THE WAY IT IS DONE.
How a Blll Presented h C,ngrsss Bs-
 comes Law.

How Blli Presented h C,agrsss Be-
 comes . Law.
 After bill has run the gauntlet Of the two houses it is publicly signed by each presiding officer and taken to the president for his approval. He has ten days not including Sundays. in which to examine the bill and make up his mind says the Chautauquan. If nothing is heard from him by the end of that period the bill becomes . law without his signature. Should he disapprove or veto bill he sends it back to that branch of congress in which it originated stating his reasons in opposition. and then the measure Is again referred to a committee and undergoes much the same experience as it did at first with this important difference tha. it must be voted for by at least two-thirds of the members of each house in order to overcome objections of the chief magistrate.
 Only very strong public sentiment will develope sufficient votes to over ride the presidents veto and this right gives him almost equal power in legislation with congress Should the president decline to sign a bill and congress adjourn before the expiration of the day period, it receives what is popularly known as pocket veto !"
 After bill has been approved by the president the department of state causes it to be printed and promul- gated. Not the slightest variation is made in printing the new law; even mistakes in spelling and punctuation are closely copied. Many people would think this foolish practice, but it is wise practice after all for were the secretary of state given permission to revise the language of a bill he might make changes in wording and punctuation that would completely overturn the intentions of congress when the bill was enacted. Millions of dollars are involved and grave constitutional questions arise on the insertion or omission of a comma.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
A New DIsfntcc ctant.

The manufacture of new disin- fectant and deordorant called Sauri- don has been commenced at Maryhill England. It is residual product of an uncommon kind of blackstone shale. which Is composed of animal and vegetable remains is remarkably light and yields a large proportion oi heavy volatile oil The oil is extracted by distillation and the residual pro- duct Is reduced to grains of different sizes varying from fine powder to the size of a pea. The powder is claimed to have an instantaneous effect upon. obnoxious natter while also be- ing tasteloss and colorless and harm. less to all animal life.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
,oHNNv,s ESSAY.
q Small Boys Version of the Discovery
 of Ametica.


 of Amciica.
 Columbus was great man and is known even now for miles around. al- though it is 400 years since he immi- grated and discovered the United States. He was very fond of finding out things and the roundness of the earth like an orange or ball is due to him He also made an egg sit up. which is harder, my mother says. than making boys do the same in church like me 1 wish my father was more like Columbus must have been, for when tried to make an egg stand up on end he told me to stop right away or I'll send you to bed. Who knows what country l might dis cover if my parents did not discourage me right in the beginning. just as 1 was ready to start out and begin to commenced?
 Columbus didn't have a much easier time than I do though. Every body thought he was crazy. and several times he, was incarcerated behind prison bars for various things and once he came before a large number of people in chains.
 He fell in with King Ferdinand and Isabella who gave him enough to pay his fare over to the United States which he went to. though it was slow work, and some of the sailors said let s go back but he wouldn't which was good for us for if he had have where would we be living nowP In Turkey maybe. where the people ain't Christians but Mausoleums and are ruled by Sultans who get elected because their fathers have just died and thrashed every fifty years by the aristocrat of all the Russians which would be terrible.
 Columbus was nearly three months crossing the ocean in three boats. He set sail August 3. 1492. at 8 o'clock in the morning, and the cyclopedia says the first thing he did was to weigh his anchor. though 1t never says why. Then he sailed right ahead for three days, when he broke his fudder and had to go to Africa to have it fixed, which delayed him some and the crew got mutinous which he immediately put a stop to and set out again, this time keeping it up until he reached America, when he planted his flags and said: Oh. never mind about that" to the mutinous sailors who said they were sorry they had been mutinous
 Then he kissed the beach and told the proprietor it belonged to Ferdi- nand and Isabella, but the proprietor never murmured. Then he went back to see King Ferdinand and Isabella who made him round shouldered with honors and riches which Columbus liked so much that he started out again and discovered America again several times more before he died. but it got monotonous to people after a while. and for time Columbus ceased to be great man. even King Ferdinand and Isabella going back on him. He died in 1506 and had several fine funerals. --Harper's Young People.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
The Haughsy Floor Manager.

The young man was leaning against the wall watching the dancers with some interest He didn't look ex- actly like man of great prominence; in fact probably no one in the hall had ever seen him before but that didn't seem to trouble them. and he certainly didn't care.
 To his right was prominent citizen also interested in the dance. and to his left was a floor manager The young man saw him bow and said to himself
 George! but they sort of look ou. for a stranger here. It's quite nov city"
 How are you enjoying yourself' asked the floor manager
 First rate. first rate" returned the young man. Never better"
 .,Sirw exclaimed the floor manager. haughtily.
 Out of sight" said the young man. .i'm enjoying it all right
 Il wasn't speaking to you. sir ? said the floor manager.
 Never mind never mind" re- turned the young man with gracious wave of the hand I'm enjoying myself just as much.
 The prominent citizen laughed and moved away. and the floor manager tried to find some excuse for having the young man put out of the hall. Chicago Tribune.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04

corn was in the milk. Ssedine oSup d
 entire space at different iuoogvu1 and to the surprise of many thi, M has not been rooted up; l took - precaution of having plenty q epcl ashes and cindera slack coal o11 sand placed in their sleeping s1o4o
 four large wagon loads--so wheD " were not eating corn or out lor Voc19 they were enjoying roofing Soe thlD@- to them. appetizinR morsel--v15e4 aids and stimulates digestion; bouo1oD have box filled with salt as1e4 copperas rosin and lime. arrango4 oo they can eat of it and not waGto A They consume great deal Can oco most any time through the day one e more hogs at the box taking tholR o.r petizer My argument is try an1 satisfy a hog with those necooooev wants that their nature calls for. an1 they will be satisfied without rootlaoA
 -J. M. Stonebaker in the Praot3ecI Farmer.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
DISCIPLINE.
My life is full of scented fruits,

My life is full of scented fruits,
 My garden blooms with stocks sa
 cloves;
 Yet OCT the wall my fancy shoots,
 And hankers after harsher loves An why my foolish heart repines- Was I not housed within a wastei These velvet flowers and syrup vines Arc sweet, but are not to my tasta A bowling moor, a ~sttled hut,
 piercing smoke of sodden peat The savor of a russet nut,
 would make my weary pulses beat 0 stupid brain that blindly swervesi o heart that strives not, nor endures! Since flowers are hardships to your nerves Thank heaven a gardcn-lot is yoursl
 Edmund Gosse, in the Athenaum
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
ITEMS TO SMILE OVER.

five got an idea for 6 play" [" said spiv- wins Well, I'll tell you what to do with it if you want your play to succeed" re. plied Spavvins. 'Whatr Leave the idea out. Washington Star.
 Janitor, to artist returning from . vaca- There have been so many callers since you left that have been obliged to wash the names from the slate twice to make room for others "-Fliegende Blset- ter
 Cobble-Billy Bender thought he would he funny, so he went to the undcrtakers . shop logged out in q shroud.' Stone How was he treatsdf' Cobble-sOh they laid him out '-Clothier and Fur nisher
 Marriage has not changed him much, V said Mrs. Potts. Before we were mar ried he would not let me carry the lightest bundle-and. he does not now. He lets me lug the heavy ones. '-lndianapolis Journal
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
How to Breed.

Mir. Sanders Spencer an EnG11o1| authority on pig raising, said in tAo course of lecture to farmers: s4ho' great secret is to breed only lrom those pigs whose sires and dncno oco from prolific strains. and from thoco sows that are bred to milk we'll I10 chief cause of SO much dissatisfno o1ou' in the past with SO many of tho eog. called pedigreed pigs has ben N want of attention to the prulifcoCX and rearing properties of the boo)5' and sows bred from The greet U6o'| has been to produce pig short in t1 head heavy In the jowl. thick in tl(7 shoulder. and wide on the ton e1 then to make it SO beastly fat thG1 X could neither eat grass walk abo1 or produce it's species; nor wpe it 0v for anything but to render into lG1
 This Is exactly the most useleG1 o the most unprofitable kind of . TT is possible to produce Tho folly llIoo any other silly fancy takes . lot c1 killing, but although it dies hard
 death knell is sounded. and nocAi11 has brought about this most o1o1 factory change moro than has tl6 l1 cussion in the press and at tho lnrnc
 clubs on the question Of tho bcoc 0 for the bacon curors' purpose
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
The Rootinx rrobl sln.

The question as to whether ringing hogs is advisable or not has never yet been satisfactorily discussed. though there has been very able ad- vocates on both sides of the question.
 The strangest argument in favor of
 having the hogs nose as nature made 1t to root hog or die" is, that before
 the invention of the vsIpus devices | for the prevention of roofing. such as rings. sitting of the nose and etc. there was little or no sickness among swine; in fact such a disease as hog cholera was unknown; and the ques-
 tion arises will he root if he can have l tha. for which he roots or it's sub- stltute without take tho negative
 side of the question and will endeav- CT to show that the hog is no excep- | ton to other animal life The wild deer will find his salt lick. the buffalo the secluded spot or territory where the buffalo grass grows and in like manner will other animals seek the
 haunts and peculiar food necessary to their subsistence; so with the hog;
 while he has been domesticated and
 brought up to the present prominent and valuable animal. he has not lost
 his hoggish taste and appetite for 1 flesh and blood. worms roots nuts,
 sand and gravel. If these articles are not furnished. he is likely to go into l the ground with his nose to find what natul e has imbued him with a taste | for to give him health and strength;
 we oftentimes are blind to our own
 best interest by thinking that roofing is damaging to the land and does the hog no good. It is just the reverse. as it benefits the land and stimulates l the growth and health of the hog
 know of spots or places on my farm.
 where the wild Morning Glory four ished. filling tho ground with its roots to the exclusion of aught else; when
 ever my hogs had access to those places. they turned over and over the ground in search of those roots and in | like manner when the grub worm in- tested the ground. If those places were in the regular pasture field or meadow when the hogs were satisfied with the success and their task ended. | I would take the harrow. smooth down and SOW grass seed. clover or timothy, very thickly and harrow again; soon | there would be sod better than those places that had remained un- disturbed Hogs are not disposed 1 to root when putting on flesh l rapidly and are in good condition. l have over one hundred in q four-acre lof of-corposed of n Qrove-- without ] rings that have been feeding since
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
Too Good and Too Great.

At Monterey. Mexico. a couple of Americans keeping saloon put up a picture of George Washington as a sign Whereupon General Reyes, gov. ernor of Nuevo Leon has ordered the likeness removed saying Washington was too good and too great to have his picture used as a beer sign
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
A. Baa a. Two Bungs.

Diamond importer This parcel is two carets short There must be q leak somewhere.
 Stock clerk - "Very likely. sir. Every stone in the lot has over fifty facets "-Jewelers' Weekly.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
Respon.,bllisy rired.

Mrs Ann-Even if you are engaged to George don't approve of your all lowing him to kiss you.
 Mary What are two young people 10 do when Cupid bumps their heads together?-New York Herald.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
 Rich In ldOlss

The islands of Lake Nicaragua are rich in idols and pottery, especially the southwest side of the slopes of that most picturesque of volcanoes O,notepa This island was evidently Inc cemetery for all the region around who worshipped the flaming csas ss oAs god of Are
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
A Con.ciensfou. Lnwyer.

Lawyer (examining besitating wit ness) Why don't you speak out and tell the whole truth?
 Colored Witness s-rze afeard to tell de, whole truf. cause knight tell lie
 Judge-What would happen if you told lie?
 witness-I spex our side would win. Puck.
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
The .s.rIpplngs- se lr,sh.

Most farmers understand tko 1 portance of getting milk to tho lr drop that will come from tho vn1 Not only is this milk the richeo4 that leaving 1t to tho COW io . I0 but it rapidly dries her up an1 II q careless milking Is repeated thG GH H will fatten and fl we'll fed. uE1l 6f be entirely dry. There ase se0@ reasons why this last milk q richest. It Is not cream. aq1 not rise through tho udder to 1G6 But the fat globules being liehtok more rapidly and nrst reach tho Besides as milk produCtl0u r 41S going on, this last drawn hoo made in less time and haA tho1~ had less of its fat absorbed IT COW. If milking were doae U times per day. instead Of o11y there would be still lose ob6oGT But such milking rapidly ro1~o
 flesh unless tho COW ie lo1 unusual liberality. -Amerioo0 z vatOr. <
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
Thought Something Of Him-eiG

She-I wouldn marry the best man living.
 He-Then there is no hope for me. It was because I thought you would that proposed to you New York Presa
The Forrest City times., 1892-03-04
Home Hiats.


 Prayerbooks % thin and lone = slipped under the glove afs uo new '. *J
 This is season when ths uoo3 or dinary combining of coiors n <1 dresses is seen. M
 You cannot mako the woman - Y believe that the common aenso either comfortable or stylish E
 The main need of children is qufo1 S food and warmth. By these coo<ll comes into harmony with life. ssz N 2z
 How to make our homes heu111fr we'll a beautiful, should inteeo member of the human family. V W
 To tell good eggs, put them in N the large ends turn up they are nG4 *5 This is an infallible rule to dio1i good egg from a bad one. }$ss 4 !:3
 A man afflicted with corus, wI4 chases store shoes, always triss on with two stockings one pulled on 0o other His reason is that the e& not bs too tight
 To remove paint from walk soda in water and an e.aual quickline. Apply the solutton X brush In ten minutes the pafn1 U washed of in hot water. <
 There is no department ok livir1 - portant as the air we breathe. A1 and food are the basic essentio & They must be pure and good ~ life. We believe that moot nu suits from ignorance or the via1o natural law. F
 For dish towels some use Gl1n& | should be of the very best qooal1 1 V old drilling or poor quality <l ! makes better ones; and many le11o3 u a light weight, unblesched I'll. oo 6 ton cloth does not leave tho nn1 11n1 l'm does when little worn
 To allay itching in soune eptlnoS G fections a very plsasant arQ11so11on err sists of the freely expreooe4 511eo 0 x lemon diluted with four or 0V0 o|rm bulk of water, to which . l6U CIT cologne have been addpd 0 t1@ quantity of ross water 11M = cooling. s &|