The Bolivar bulletin. (Bolivar, Tenn.) 1888-1946, 1892-08-12
JUDGE BUEL's EXPERIENCE.

Dear Billion hearing of the fourth
political party thought it was a mere
hoax-something got up for amusement
and would soon pass away, but | find
this a mistake. 1t is as much political
party as some others and is here to stay
Last week an emissary of this party sneak
ed into this Deighbcrhood and advertised
a meeting of this party at the school house
on the hill at l o'clock Friday night.
had long been dissatisfied with the pre-
sent existing parties; did not believe that
they could or would bring the necessary
relief to a down-tr6dden country. wan
ted something and could not tell what that
something was. One thing knew wan
ted and that was money. Another was
l did not intend to work for it. thought
the government or something else ought
to furnish my wants. With these thoughts
ranking in my bosom l cautiously and
stealthily slipped into the school house
at 1890 o'clock Friday night and wal
ted coming events. The night Was very
dark, but precisely at o'clock the house
was filled to overlooking with live hu-
man beings. The sound OF the gavel was
heard and everything was still as death.
The Chairman Tin the dark / supposed
eloquent address ex plained the object of
the meeting and called on the Secretary
to repeat 1.-THE Secretary can't ready the
platform of the fourth party, which he
did in the most impressive manner. Then
followed half dozen of the most eloquent,
sensible, logical, grandiloquent speecnes
that have ever heard. They were brim
full of anarchy, communism, polygamy
LII IL l. rLnk Ill oil
Just the very thing | wanted and had
long looked for. / involuntarily at the
top of my voice cried, Eureka; l have
found it; it is enoughi all want and N ore
toop l am truly glad that Mr.. John
Brown has the brains and nerve to come
to the front and in unmistakable LAM
guage formulate one of the gran
dest political platforms that was ever pre-
sented to an oppressed and down-trodden
people. 1t will take the entire country.
Long live Mr.. Brown. / regard him to-
day as greater man than Clay, Webster,
Calhoun or any other political man that
ever has or ever will live in the civilized
world. The speaker of the occasion / re-
gard as superior in eloquence to Cicero,
Demosthe nes or Patrick Henry. At the
conclusion of these speeches the chairman
arose and said this party would have en-
tire control OF the United States in three
weeks, and in four weeks would COM
mence issuing $50 to be sent through the
mails to each mem Der of the fourth par
ty. He concluded by calling for new
members. at once gave my name and
the name of my four year old son, Tom.
You see wanted two $50 checks and as
my name would get but one, | put in
Tommie's name to get another. Just; be-
fore adjournment l related my polit cal
experience to the party, how / had been
a Democrat, Republican, Greenbacker,
Prohibitionist, Granger, third partyite,
and, in fact, had tried all the parties and
had never found political rest until found
it In the fourth party. Nearly every
man responded, that is my experience.
objected to meeting and transacting bust
ness in the dark, as | had no way of iden-
tifying the speakers; but the Chairman
said he had long since feared from exper-
fence that some objects were more easily
| identified by the sense of smell than sight,
and if at any time should find it difficult
to identify a speaker of this party in the
dark | would have a perfect right accor-
ding to the bylaws OF the party, to sneak
up and smell the gentleman spea king.
He said there was peculiar flavor arising
from each fourth party man that never
failed to identify him: Since joining the
| fourth party / find that 1 am souring a
little, and will soon get very rancid. The
explanation being entirely satisfactory to
the party we adjourned sine die.
JUDGE RUEL-