The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1892-06-03
THE HIRED MAN. n

"You've come, have you?" said my
mother. Fin law. in a deep voice, as she
stood on the threshold, grimly surveying
me with eyes that shone like hard,
,reenish-blue gooseberries behind her
jpectacles.
1t was rather curious complication.
My mother-in.law had not the least idea
who was. I had cheerfully intended to
take her BY surprise; but now that the
oventful moment had arrived, my cour.
age was ooziDg out at the ends Of my
fingers.
My name is Richard Dalton. Twas
then just twenty -ons, with a face that
was not absolutely ugly, sublime au.
dacity and pockets not particularly WE'LL
lined. and had just distinguished my.
self by running away with a pretty girl
from boarding school.
"But, Dick" she had demonstrated,
we've nothing to live on"
"Don't be a goose, darling" had been
my reply. what do people need to live
on? All the wants Of this world, more
or less, are fictitious. A crust Of bread
and glass Of water three times day,
and now and then suit Of clothss-ws
must be poor. indeed, il we can't manage
to compass that"
Nettie had looked admiringly upon me,
and acquissoed in my argument. We
had taken board at the Angel Hill Hotel,
and began our honeymoon royalty. At
the end OF month mine host had be-
come little importunate on the sub ject
OF his bill, and Nettie's mother had writ
ten letter to her, signifying that she
wanted nothing whatever to do with US.
We had made our own bed. she signihsd,
and now we might lie on it.
"Oh, Dick" cried Nettie, clasping her
hands, "what are we to dor"
Hanged il know!" was my rather
blank response. But don't cry. darling,
I'll 60 and see her myself"
"You, Dick!" xA
". myself"
"She'll have nothing to say to you"
She can't help herself. "
She'll turn you out Of DOORS"
well see about that"
"But, Dick, you don't know-you can't
have any idea-how terrible she is"
sighed Nettie.
Saint George conquered tho dragon,
my love, l asserted, cheerfully, "and I
mean to conquer your mother! So pack
my valiss, there's darling. and I'll be
of before the landlord comes back from
Doston!"
"But, Dick, if he's troublesome, what
can say to him." appealed poor little,
frightened Nettie.
"Tell him I've gone out Of town, and
shall be back in few days" said I, con-
fldently.
But when walked resolutely up to
my mother-in laws door she greeted mo
as If had been expected for the last
week or so.
you've come, have your" was the
salutation.
well, yes, I admitted, "rvs como"
"What on earth detained you ?" said
she.
In my mind cast about what to say,
and settled on the first convenient OK.
cuss that came into my head.
THE train was delayed at Boglstown,"
said I.
"Well, come in, now that you're here"
she said, "and get warm. Its awful
cold weather for this time O. year, isn't
it?n
Kinder" said I, with an asserting
nod.
You are married, I suppose?" she
said.
AOh. yes, said I. swallowing the hot
coffee and winking my eyes very hard,
I'm married."
"Can your wife make herself generally
useful about the placer" sharply de.
manded the old lady.
Certainly she can, said I, BEGINNING
vaguely to see my way through the
mists OF perplexity that had heretofore
obscured my brain.
"How old is she ?" asked Mrs. Martin.
i. Eighteen, answered.
Mrs. Martin frowned.
"What does possess girls to get mar.
ried nowadays, said she, "beforo
they've left off dolls and patchwork ?"
/ looked thoughtfully down at the pat.
tern OF my plate-ap pink Chinaman cross.
ing carmins bridge, with two very red
Willows dropping at the far end OF it, and
some impossible streaks OF weather be.
low-and made no direct answer. Nv
mother-in.law was doubtlessly laboring
under Misrepresentation, but I did not
exactly see that it was my business to
set her right She had evidently On.
gagged a hired man, and took it 10,
granted that I was the parsonage in
question.
what can you do?" she asked, alb.
ruptly. And with equal curtnsss I re.
eponded:
Anything"
Come, like that" said my mother.
in-law. rubbing her hands. AT least
you are not afraid Of work. Do you un.
derstand cows and horses2"
"Well-not much, I owned. @There
were no cattle at my last place" (Which
was very true. for had been clerk in
bank at $500 year) "But have not
the least doubt that could soon learn il
you would kindly show me what is ex.
pected Of me-"
Can you cut wood 2" she asked.
snl