The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1892-05-25


sighted Old Lady-Thank you, sir.
Gentlemen aren't often as polite as they
used to be.
True Realism Managerial reheal SAID
Ii Mr.. Baconshak, we want TO put o
little realism into this play. Can you
suggest anything? Baconshak-Y
might try paying real salaries.
Dying for Q principle seems TO me a
higher degree Of virtue than scolding
for it; and the history Of heather ra-
ces is full of instances where men have
laid down their lives for the love of
their kind, Of their country, Of truth,
nay, even for simple manhood's sake, or
to show their obedience or fidelity.
What would not such beings have done
for the souls of men, for the Christian
commonwealth, for the King of Kings,
if they had lived in days OF larger Right ?
Which seems to you nearest heaven,
Socrates drinking his hemIcck, Repl-
lus going back 10 the enemy's camp, or
that old New England divine sitting
comfortably IN his study and chuckling
over his conceit Of certain poor women
who had been burned 10 death in his
own town, going roaring out of one
fire into anotherw Holmes.
How Precedent is Established "A
witness was teshfying that he had met
the defendant at breakfast, and that
the latter called the waiter and said
"One moment" exclaimed the counsel
for the defence i object 10 what he
said" Then followed q legal argu-
ment Of about an hour and half on
the objection, which was oyerruled, and
the court decided that the witness
might state what was said. "Well, 90
on and state what was said TO the
waiter. remarked the winning counsel.
flushed with hIs legal victory. "Well,"
replied the witness, "he said Bring me
a beefsteak and fried potatoes.
PeddIer-Beg pardon. ma'am, but I
am agent for DR.. Feeders Spice Root
Bitters, and I'm sure If the members of
your family would try them they would
soon have the finest appetites Lady |
at Door (severelyl-This. sir, is a |
boarding house.-Street & Smiths |
Good News.
The Disobedient Husband: Mrs.
Rural (angrily)-You promised me
when you went up to the city last win
ter that you wouldn't 20 near cousin
Maggie's. Mr.. Rural-Y-e.s, my
dear. "But you did, Ill only took
one meal there, my dear Il knew it
II knew you had taken a meal there
or something. Murder will out
What's happened. my dear!'' "She
writes that she is coming here with her
SIX children to stay all summer. New
York Weesly.
When We are poor VIC always have
very clear ideas Of the duty of the rich;
butwhen We gain money we are experts
in the science Of showing the poor how
to behave.-Puck.
MaddOx(waking from a napl Il must
have been sound asleep. Gazzan lwho
has been annoyed by Maddox's snOr-
ing): You were. ! heard the sound.
He-Can you keep secret? She
: Certainly | can. He-Then I'd like
to tell you that | want to get married
She-You don't say so. lie Yes, and
/ don't want anybody but you 10 know
it.-Texas Siftings.
'The man l wed must be handsome,
brave and noble; he must have no bad
habits and must love me devotedly."
"But, my dear, that isquite impossible"
"Why?' Because there is only one
such man in the world and he is going
to marry me-"
A Thorough Workman: Mrs. Sim
pleton-Doctor, Is 1t really true that
many people are buried alive? DR..
Graves proudlyl-None of my patients
ever are.-Puck.
The animal dissected by the engine
IS usually valuable one, according TO
the owners claim for damages. This
fact has been noted by other observers
besides the speaker for whose remarks
The Michigan Farmer makes room:
He said railroad train would improve {
! hog quicker than any other cross. He
had seen miserable razorbacks change
% thoroughbreds by simply running
rain over them. lie had lived in Tex /;
IS some years and never saw any good /.
logs, but never heard Of o poor one be-
ng killed by a railroad > s
His Ambition: "Willie," said the
risitor, "what is your ambition?" "I'd t
Ike" said the boy, ito have people
remble like leaves at the mere mention
{ my name. ."-Harper's Young Peo-
lie.
Anxious 10 Know: Nov you never
mel the odor Of liquor on my BREATH"
aid the clergyman, expostulating with 9
Staggers for bis bibulous propensities. t
No; what do you do for it7' asked
staggers, with deep interest--Epoch.
It is with men as with trees; if YOU !;
op of their finest branches into which
hey we're pouring their young life juice, 4
he wounds will be healed over with c
ome rough boss, some odd excrescence;
nd what might have been o grand {
rec expanding into liberal shade,is bat |,
whimsical, misshapen trunk. Many /,