People's voice. [volume] (Wellington, Sumner County, Kansas) 1890-1917, 1892-08-26

Illnk we were 0oth fairly good look
ing, and if any difference existed I
think it was in my favor. Yet father
and stepmother, and, in fact, everyone
else, pretended that there was
the greatest difference and that it
was all to my disadvantage. Even
traits OF character that we possessed
in common were given a different def
milton, being considered laudable in
her and pernicious in me. So with per-
sonal appearances. What in her were
considered as charms were in me looked
upon as defects.
Mary and were both quite positive
IN our views. In her case that trait
was commended, because, as they said.
it showed firmness Of character; while
with me it was condemned, because il
denoted a hateful stubbornness. We
both liked reading, a fact which, as far
as she was concerned, was noted with
pleasure, since it showed a love of
learning; but which on my part denoted
laziness. And so it was through the
whole category. She was always right;
was always wrong. That which was
commended in her was condemned in
me.
Our hair was alike in color, length
and texture, yet she had auburn locks,
while had simply "red wisps"-she
was "auburn-haired," l was red
Icaded." In every particular where
there was likeness between us it was
spoken Of in her case as charm, while
with me it became a hideous defect.
These things, of course, were mere
trifes, but they were enough to make a
sensitive child very miserable, notwith-
standing.
In spite Of the vast difference made
between us, and the feeling of jealousy
that sometimes ranked in my breast
because Of it, l loved my sister dearly,
and did everything that had the power
to do to make her love me in return.
For time she seemed to be very fond
of me, and often when l wept in loneli-
ness and sorrow she came to me, and,
putting her arms about me, kissed me
and took away that feeling of desola-
ton that was sometimes so heavy on
my heart. But that was when she was
very young and before her mother had
instilled into her mind the principles of
her own.
My Stepmother made it a point to i'm
press her daughter with the idea that
though we were sisters wide gulf lay
between us, and that her life and mine
lay in widely separated grooves. This
teaching, persistently pursued, had its
effect in time, and gradually my sister
and drifted farther and farther apart,
chasm across which we could never
clasp hands, opening wider and deeper,
day by day, at our feet.
Mary grew to look upon me as a be-
ing inferior to herself and as one not
worthy OF her consideration. The little
love she had held for me died out of her
heart, and she had neither sympathy
nor care for my srfferings and heart
aches. The change in her was not so
gradual as to escape my notice, and
many were the tears shed and many
the hours of agony l experienced as l
watched her love slipping from me and
knew there was none other to lean on
for sympathy.
Oh! what would I not have given
for the power of retaining my sisters
affections and Of drawing her closer to
me and making her feel for me as felt
for her! What sacrifice would I have
not made to retain the little love, scant
though it was, which she had given me?
What sacrifice, in short, did l not make
to that end? Willingly gave up to her
the best of everything-willingly con-
sented to her having all the new
dresses, the jewels, the musical instru-
ments, and in fact all the beautiful and
desirable things that came to the house.
Of course in such self-sacrifces made
virtue of necessity, since she would
have had all these things, anyhow; but
it was a virtue, nevertheless, for loving
such Injuries as did it required great
effort OF will-power not to covet them
not to feel that they should be in part
mine. .... ...
Furthermore, l made myself servant
for my sister, and was ever ready to adj
minister to her wants. would do any
service, no matter how mental. if there
by she could be favored. would deny
myself any pleasure or comfort, if by
so doing her pleasure was augmented.
| abased myself at her feet, in short,
and all in the hope of retaining her
love.
Yet my sacrifices availed me nothing.
No matter how denied myself for her
sake, Mary thought / was only doing
my duty. No matter how abased my
self for her ACKNOWLEDGEMENT, my sister
felt that | was simply rendering to her
the homage that was her due. She
showed no appreciation of my sacri-
fees, and failed to so much as return
me thanks for my services. In spite of
all my efforts my sisters heart closed
against me, the chasm between us
, widened day by day and we drifted
t farther and farther apart.
At last l was forced to realization
t OF my sisters feelings, and, though
: would have given the world to have
, avoided it, l had to acknowledge to my
: self that she had no love in her heart
| for me. This knowledge, when l al
) lowed it to possess me, came with
5 crushing effect, and l felt that nv heart
would break beneath 1t. realized
| that the only tie Of love had on earth
was severed, and that was alone and
stranger in nv own family. Ali how