Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1892-09-10

Few necessaries into grip sack and buys
''round-trip" ticket and goes away on Saturday
evening to return on Monday morning.
What is his condition when he goes away?
He is truly tired out and needs rest, but he is
not half SO tired as he thinks he is Just show
him piece Of work by which he might make a
little money and see how much energy there ia
lett In him. He will. apparently, be fresh as
| q daisy. But he imagines himself PLAYED out,
| ana so, In order to be rs fresh as a daisy the
next week. he goes into the fields to gather the
daisies themselves Perhaps, IL he is very much
| OF a city man. in conversation with his farmer
friend he will admire especially those fields
where the daisies grow thickest being all I'M
conscious that countrymen hate daisies and are
ashamed OF those fields in which they grow.
EACH TO HIS OWN SPHERE.
or course, such is the weakness Of mankind
the city man is no sooner loose in the country
than he pretends he has lived there all his life
He is proud of this knowledge and he walks
into his hosts potato Patch and congratulates
him upon the appearance of his tomatoes.
he says, pointing to something green with leaves
and stalks; lis it for pipes or cigars?"
That's corn says his host.
bles tobacco"
There is no limit to the gullibility of the city
countryman coming to town frequently has his
navigation arranged by the bunco steerer and
he finds the smooth waters Of his existence sud
denly turned into wild storm Of speculation,
and he sails back into the country without any
cargo except a large consignment of experience.
ne l. apt to buy useless clothing merely to sat
isfy a sudden fancy he has taken to some cap
tivatins Hebrew. If new pickpocket has ar
rived In town he and the countryman are drawn
together by some mysterious hidden force. If
the countrypan takes drink he proceeds often
to roar like one of his own short-horn bulls. and
he soon dsturbs the peace. On tho whole the
countryman fares rather badly when he comes
to the city. He has. however, the good sense
not to try and hide the fact that he is a coun-
t-yman, perhaps for the very good reason that
1t would be no use; but ii must gall him exceed
ingly, or, as he would say, ''raise his dandcr
consid able" to be laughed at and treated like
big child that can be easily teased, or amused,
or deceived.
COUNTRY SURPRISES FOR TIE CITY MAN.
But just look at the poor city man in the
country. Just think of the troubles, starts.
surprises tina. lie in wait FOR him. If the
coantryman is laughed at in the city. let the
city man refec. upon the horribly ridiculous
, figure he cuts in the country. Take the matter
OF dogs. for instance. In the city you under
stand that you are safe from them. for dan
gerous ones are not permitted TO roam at
iirSe, ANU moreover. IL Inc CITY they are apt
TO suffer from an embarrassment of riches.
Where there SO many human calves to bite
the dog lets the matter 60 not knowing where
to begin: bat III the country the dog has moth
ing 20 Do bu. TO think of his grievances against
mankind. He is fed but little. 50 he dige.ts the
venom of his spleen. He is splendid watch
dog. and this Ii rather an unnecessary quality
for his master seldom has any portable prop
erty that Il sane man would wish to steal. The
city man. therefore, having nothing but the
o-etical knowledge of the country greets the
dog tina. meets him. when he arrives 1T the
farm house where he is going to recupcrate.
| with an easy air of Familiarity. lie
calls him odd fellow" and strokes his
head. Now. if the dog meets him barking he
Is safe: II the dog wag- lis tail the chances are
in the man favor. for PREACHER, is not neces-
sa,llF what is intended. but il the dog stands
still ana says nothing at all the chances are
that the ci1y Il.n will be bitten. If he escapes
n. first he rray. from fanciel security choose
/ to take walk alone by moonlight. and il he
does there Is every probability that the excel
lent dog will chew Kim. The best way TO trea.
country dog il 20 taSe'no notice of him and
10 pretend YOU are not in the least afraid OF
him. although really you may be IN cold
Precipitation from fear OF him. The probable
, lty IL lac VIII take at least one nip at YOU ANY,
how, bat your chances of e9cape are better
when yca assume the virtue of courage no
matter how much you may lack it. The beauty
think i. such capital joke if the Cog attacks
you and fails to do any hing more than under
NINE your constitution from shock. The sense
of hun1or of the countryman il especially keen
IN is apprecia ION Of practical jokes on men
FROM the city.
HABITS OF CHICKENS.
Then. take chickens. There is no danger to
a m.n from chickens. bu: the countryman takes
delight in co:eTsing you in relation to their
habits. lie asks you whe her You ever heard of
hen lavIn5 TWO eggs in one day. aild upon
your replying no, he assures you that lie had a
Il hen thai did il. You believe h;la and tell
ofhers and are laughed at for your pains How
, fhoEid you know? Probably You know almost
nothing Uf chfaenS except that thew cost a
certain sum a2d are very good eating. How
fhoa-d you know whe !her they Law two eggs a
day or not? Pu. il down as a fact tina: thew
don t; that no hen ever did such n thing: that
no hen ever viii do such thing Ye. there
Is h.Idlv a farm in the United States tina. has,
no; got a iaan residing on it who tell You of
Il case OF hen he once had tha, layed two eggs
/ In one day. He "a not lying-that il, he thinks
he 10 not-but ne is either joking or is the vic
Inn OF a Srieyous mistake. Countrvmen also
try to confuse men with remarks about roos ter s
cgg6. bus there they fail. for the Ecst pro-
Eounced city men know that eggs are things
peculiar to hens.
As for hog.. cows and bulls, the city man is
In constant danger from them. A SOW with q
liter OF pigs ia often fierce, and there is some
thing painfully ignominous in being chased by
hog. They never chase countrymen, but,
being of humorous disposition, they take
especial pleasure in frightening a fmartlv
clothed Young man from the city into jumping
into mud hole. Cows and bulls. too, are
ferocfous looking. and when one of the latter
makes lunGe at You you had better pocket
your dignity and get over the fence as fast as
you can, even if the fence is made Of barbed
wire.
THE BARBED-wIRE FENCE.
The barbed-wire fence is in itself a source Of
misery to the unsophistcated. Countrymen
go into the field it incloses by gate, or near a
post where they climb with tho greatest DELHI
Grafton and care, but the wretch who has never
had more than distant acquaintance with this
trenchc-ous invention is thoroughly convinced
that he can go through the fence in a space
where there are no barbs. Reckless idiot! He
learns too late that he can't do it. The lacera-
ton of his trousers is humiliating enough. but
he usually rends and tears his person also Torn
and bleeding he re.ires from the contest with
the fence and he always has an abiding respect
for barbed wire afterward.
The city man in the coun try suffers, too
from the constant contempt that he is visited
with. He does not like to clean horse; there
fore be knows nothing about horses. He rides
as a city man should and as few countrymen
can; therefore he does not know anything about
riding. He likes to be clean and he dresses
I YyHc $nS6 tHApn h r.