Mineral Point tribune. (Mineral Point, Wis.) 1869-1938, 1892-05-07
" Ii AND HUM0R.

Old Vesuyius is again in state of
eruption. Also the only man who can
carry his State.--Palladelphia Record.
The new coins may be an improve
ment on the old ones, but they are I'M
doubtedly equally shy and wary
Puck.
Who is that across the street," 20,
that's a very close friend Of mine.
| Indeed" @Yes he never lends
cent" Terms stftings
Inklits-"Why do you think the
short story is POPULAR De Kicque
(who doesn't like fiction) Because it
isn't long. - Washington Star.
Talking of getting along in the
world, the bald-headed man viii al
ways be found at the front if he has a
fair show.-PhtLadeiphia Times
The married man who ;nterrupts
while his wife is giving him curtain
lecture only delays the time of his go-
ing 70 sleep. -SoRlerUiLle Journal.
In Paris Shall we 90 to the Wag-
ner opera this EVENING"" NO; I have
been inspecting big boiler factory
on the Seine this afternoon. 7-Judqe.
Thespis- Perhaps she's afraid of
stage fright. Is she used to speaking
in public?" Foyer - well, she at
tends theater parties twice week. -
N. 4 sun.
The man who has never had crayon
| portrait of himself made by an anna
teur artist probably does not yet know
what IL IS 10 have his pride fully hum
bled. -RaHs's Horn.
Leap Year aLivery man, is this
horse gentle?" Liyeryman IT. Yes,
ma'am, exactly what you want; he is
used to being driven with one hand"
--BiaghamptoH Republican.
Fat Man-"Whose costume shall |
wear to the masquerade ball?7 Cyni-
cal Friend-"Don't wear any costume.
Tie a string to your ankle and 20 as
toy balloon. Terms Syttngs.
Rimer (entering the editorial sane
| tum) - have written a poem on the
| grip sir Editor lwho is just over a
severe attack Of the malady Well,
it deserves it" Brooklyn Lye
Mrs. Watts Mrs Figg is 50 enter
tanning don't you think" Mrs. Potts
isn't she, thought? Why, ] have to
send the children out Of the room ev-
cry time she calls. "-I Indianapolis Jour
! nal
Jinks Il suppose you've gotten over
inclosing kisses IN letters to your
wite2' Eilkins -"Yes, except when |
send remittance. In that case give
the chsck a good-by kiss.-N /, Her
aid.
Amer Miss Fitz says her prayers
every night she looks under the bed,
! but She has never found a man in all
tuese years" Jessie - Wonderful!
Aud she keeps on praying?'-M T.
| Herald
If mans wife caught him kissing
his typewriter il could hardly be claim
ed to be a typographical error, but it
would certainly be misprint and
would be promptly corrected. - New
orleans Delta
Mr. Dusenberry quite inebriated)
My dear, | couldn't go down that
toboggau slide 10 would take my
breath. Mrs. Dusenberry 1T
wouldn't be bad thing if it did. -
LtSd' ngt"yS'
Young man Mother YOU say how
much ! will lose by marrying a girl so
/ far below me in social standing as
Clara, but then just think how much
she will gain, and it will all be in the
family. Hqrpcr's Bazar.
Bcggar -@S:r, am starving Cree
sus Here take this cent and tell me
how YOU became SO miserably poor"
| Bcggar -"Ah, sir, | was like YOU.
was too fond Of giving away large
sums of money to the poor -EpocA.
Bridegroom You said I would be
surprised when YOU told me about the
dowry YOU were going to give your
| daughter, and now you give nothing
at all.' Father-in-law - Well, YOU
are surprised, are you not2"-F hegsuae
Batter,
Brown-"An agent for shirts said
you sent him to me Have you a
| grudge against me?7 Jones NO; |
have grudge against the agent.
| Brown-"What do you mean2" Jones
II thought he'd make sale. kate
Fields Washington.
Il don't think I shall cali on Miss
| Nippings again, he said reflectively.
| @Why?' "She made use Of the express
sion, the late unpleasantuess, last
night what Of that?" "She said it
in a way that left me in doubt whether
1 she meant me or the war. w. Washing
ton Star
Father" asked Tommy why did
Ajax defy the lightniua?H Because,
my son, Ajax was a French duelst,
and the lightning was known TO miss
/ 5000 times where it hit once. More
over. it was 500 miles away and wasn't
/ lightning at that time Ajax knew
whom to defy ."--7ezaS Siftings
A woman viii eat anything without
complaining, while a man viii begin
TO backslide whenever the cooking
| goes wrong; but when it comes 10 the
| tit offs garment that doesn't suit her,
she has opinions that can no more be
/ held in check than you can put nit
/ tens on landslide RAMS Horn.
Steddigoe-"Suppose I decide to let
YOU have the money how do / know
.