Morning journal and courier., 1892-02-11
COLORED.

"But why did they break off the match at the last moment2" "Oh, the color of his hair killed everything in her trousseau. |" Life.
 "It is one of the unc ertainties of rank, said the cabbage as it wondered whether it would be sour kraut or @ havana.-Wash- ington Star.
 He-Will you be mine, please? She You will have to apply to higher court than the Common pleas" Ask papa Boston Post.
 Women are hard to please. If men are jealous it angers them, and if they are not jealous it angers them still more.-Flie- gende Blatter.
 "How much can you get on a postal cardg" asked Hiler.
 q don't know" answered Ruler; 'I never tried to pawn one. ne."-Washington Star.
 Nothing Like a Change. Since my return from the south of France Pm another woman.
 Sarcastic Friend-How delighted your husband must be.-Fun.
 'I think of you full often," wrote Miss Poesy to unregenerate Bungley the other day. fI wonder how she knewi' unused Bungley, just returned from protracted soree.-Harvard Lampoon.
 She was worth million, and when Her bert said: "Will you be mine!" she an swered:
 "No, Herbert, will not; but you may be mine if you wish. Washington Star.
 "What can I do to induce you to go to bed now?" asked a Harlem mamma of her fve-year-old boy.
 "You can let me sit up a little longer, was the youngsters reply.-Texas Siftings.
 Doctor--My dear madame, there is noth- ing the matter with you-you only need rest.
 "But, Doctor, just look at my tonguel''
 "Needs rest, too, madame. ."-Fliegende Blatter.
 "Hole, on dar," said a colored man, hailing an acquaintance. sDoes yer cross der street ebery time yer sees me ter keep from payin' dat billa" 'No, I doesn't" ''Whas dena" ''Ter keep from bein' axed fur it."-Texas Siftings.
 "There go the Spicer Wilcoxes, mamma! Pm told they're dying to know ms. Hadn't we better call ?" Certainly not, dear. If they're dying to know us they're not worth knowing. The only people worth our know us."-Punch. Little Ethel has never seen 8 toad before, and having by chance discovered one in her flower garden, came running to the house, her face flushed with excitement crying: Mamma, mamma, come quick There's pocketbook hopping around out here with four legs on it."-Youth's Com panion.
 Obituary editor-The oldest lnhabitani has just died; what shall say about him Managing editor-Oh, say that up to the last he retained his mental vigor to a re markable degree. o. E.-But am told he was born helpless imbecile. M. E. Ahem! Then say he retained his lack oi mental vigor to & remarkable degree Brooklyn Life. An Economical Plan.-(The baby ha. been playing for an hour with a feather | dipped in mucilage. .)-Papa Calling to mann ma in next room)-My dear, think VI, can economize next Christmas, and in stead of ffteen-dollar dolls for our infan | friends we can purchase feather-bed ant bottles of paste, and distribute them | Harper's Bazar. Young Man Lodger-"Will you mar. me7' Landlsdy-"Let me see. You hav boarded with me four years. You hav | paid promptly. You nave never grumblet at your food. No; cannot marry you.
 "Perhaps if had acted like Duffer, ant abused the coffee, grumbled at the scareit of butter, always been behind a month il
 pay, you would have married mel" "Yes
 perhaps I would. As it is I will marr buffer" "Whatr' ssYes, will marr
 Duffer He needs some discipline. Yo'
 are too good boarder to put on the fire
 list "-Tid Bits.