The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1892-09-30
roRMENrED BY TIE BLUE BLAZER


for any length of time they bid fair to
doom him to end his existence in the in
sane asylum, if he does not Succeed in
persuading Mrs. T00dles to discard hers,
or else to put some distinguishing mark
upon it. Toodles lives IN SUBURBAN
village not far from New York city,
where the blue flannel blazer is all the
rage. The chief cause of his troubles
lies in the fact that he is near-sighted,
and it is difficult for him to distinguish
one person from another, and especially
is this the case in regard to the ladies.
In the course of his lifetime this has
been the cause of several blunders on
his part, but since the blue blazers have
come in vogue and Mrs. Toodles, in an
evil moment, became the happy posses
or of one, he can scarcely venture upon
the street for fear of the consequences.
His first mishaps occurred upon the
occasion of his accompanying Mrs. L. to
the city not long since. Not wishing to
tire himself out with the tolls and vexa-
tions of her shopping excursion, he made
an appointment to meet her at the ferry
house when she had finished. At the APP
pointed time he took his station at the
waiting-room door in anticipation of her
coming. In a few moments he saw
lady in blue blazer approaching, and
thinking surely it was Mrs. Toodles he
rushed forth to meet her, but when he
had nearly reached her he saw, just in
time to save himself, that the wearer was
q colored lady. Passing her by he start
ed to walk around the block. Just as he
was lodging horse car he ran plump
into another blue blazer woman. Being
little ratified" by the horse car he did
not stop to think that it might not be
Mrs t., so he hastily took some of the
parcels from her hand and started to as
sist her to the ferry house, remarking
that they had met just in the nick of
time.
81 do not exactly understand you, SIR"
the lady said, in dignified tone. Pm
much obliged to you for your assistance,
but will relieve you of my packages now,
if you please"
Smothering the exclamation that rose
| to his lips, Toodles, bowed, and just as
was turning away, his arm was clutched
tightly, and an angry feminine voice ex-
claimed:
II should like to know who this lady
is to whom you are SO gallant, while you
leaye me to get across the street the best
way | can"
There was no doubt but that this was
the genuine Mrs. T., and the embarrassed
Toodles was soon toundering about in a
sea of perplexity, trying to explain mat
tiers to his angry wife. He finally sue
for the ferry-boat. AS they were passing
through the waiting room Toodles stop
ped at the news stand to buy an evening
paper, telling Mrs. T. that he would
meet her on the boat. After getting his
paper he made his way into the ladies'
cabin, and seeing woman in blue
blazer suit, he threw himself into the va
cant seat beside her. and pinched her
arm playfully, remarked:
"Well, dearest, here we are at last. |
hope we won't be parted again before we
reach home"
The lady jumped to her feet, and turn
ing on the dumbfounded Toodles, cried
Indignantly:
"Sir, what do you mean by taking hold
of my arm and talking so familiarly to
me ? I've good mind to have you ar
rested for disorderly conduct when the
boat reaches the other side. It's a per-
feet shame that intoxicated persous are
allowed in the ladies' cabin"
TOOdles began to stammer out an ex-
PLANTATION, Mrs. t., who was sitting a
few seats away, an amused spectator of
the scene, came to his rescue, and laugh
ingly apologized to the irate lady in his
behalf, telling her the cause of the trou-
BILE, and the incident ended pleasantly in
hearty laugh, in which the lookers-on
joined.
While they were leaving the boat and
boarding the train Toodles chung closely
to his wife's side, determined that there
should be no more mistakes if he could
avoid it, and things passed off all right
until the train reached their station. At
ter leaving the train Mrs. II. fingered on
the station platform moment to speak
to friend while Toodles, not missing
her from his side, started across the
street to the postoffice. When he was
part way over woman in blue blazer
darted past him, and thinking something
had happened to brighten Mrs. T., he
caught up with her and grasped her by
the arm, anXiously asked what the troub-
lie was.
''I'll show yez phwats the trouble eff
yez don't take yer hand off'n me, We
dirty spalpeen. Phwat dye name by in
sultin' respectable Oirish Teddy loike
meself in this manner, old loike to
know
Toodles nearly fainten from mortifca-
ton as he heard the suppressed filters
from group of frivolous young ladies,
who were looking on. After getting his
mail he started for home, thinking he
would overtake his wife on the way. As
turned the corner he saw, as he thought,
Mrs. T. little in advance. Qpickening
his steps he was beside her shortly and
taking her arm lovingly he said in tone
of relief:
''Thank the Lord, sweetheart, we are
out of our troubles at last, and I'm going
to stick close to you in the future.
won't let you out of my sight for mo-
ment, see if do"
An amused giggle came from the lady
at his side, and looking at her more
closely Toodles recognized in her, not
his wife, but young widow lady named
Jones, who lived short distance beyond
him.
"Oh, beg your pardon, Mrs. Jones, ]
assure you l mistook you for Mrs.
Toodles. Can you forgive meP'
Certainly, Mr.. Toodles, with all my
heart. l saw at once that you had mis-
taken me for your wife," said Mrs. Jones,
as she nestled snugly to his side.
"Thank you, Mrs. Jones, you are very
| good; but will be still more indebted
to you if you will refrain from mention
ing anything about this to Mrs. Toodles I;
then she won't have the laugh on me-"
That's all right, you can rest assured
won't say anything to single one
about it.
| L IL