New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1892-08-07
THE TALh OF THE DAY.

~ 4 Clarke in The Clother and Furni sher'"
shows the absudity Of that phrase a good dresser,
so often used to describe man who dresses In sooe
taste. by people who ought to know better.
.. dresser, he says is a valet. and can be nothing
else
They were a party Of Chieagoans at Parksr,s; one
the baby qayhoss Little Neck clans Sne S1 ths
nh euotber iocoscly remarked Il thought aunhos
must be some form OF pork "-tBoston Transc- PIT.
4 few days ago little John. three years old. who
Is very fond OF his pets, noticed that his young
rooster had a comb In very distressed tone OF
voice ne exclaimed: "Oh, Papa somebody has mao
hicks in my ROSTERS head
ABOUT A WATERMELON.
When you thump IL with your fingers and II gives
heavy sound.
Like summer rain a4fuin' the dry an dusty
Jes' get your Barlow ready an prepare TO make
And carve straight an steady til it opens, red an
Then fold your Barlow careful. an take your melon
Put one half on this side o you, the other half on
Then take the biggest your lap an tear the heart
An smack your lips. an praise the Lord from whom
all blessin's now -(Atlanta Constitution
IN underground London there 5000 miles Of
sewers. $4,000 miles OF telegraph wires, 3.oo miles
.Basklng In tile sun is In itself OF and con
siderable benefit, and Il is compliment 10 our
human Intelligence to find that cats and dogs under
stand that fact much better than we do Even the
blue glass had truth underlying il, and owed
such 1t achieved to the proportion OIL sun.
light which penetrated its colored medium The love
OF sunshine + naturally of strongest instincts.
and should be far healthier and happier Y We iot
ing and depressing t. How II sparkling. sunny morn
ing exhartes and makes us feel that It's 100 me
a day TO spend Indoors and yet how few holidays
urp
beams is poured out avishly all around rs, ann We
turn from II to struggle for few pitiful handouts of
something else that is yellow and shining. but not hall
likely TO bring us happiness ana oien has strange
red spots upon it.-(North American Review
A pesslmIst declares that the pleasures of vacation
consist in thinking beforehand what fine time you
going TO have, and In rejecting after"ard now
much worse a time you might have had.
Bugsby-Jones NY dear fellow, have determined
to marry and have picked out the gri. o.. ..,.
Jones-why. l am astonished. | thought YOU said
ciae what II Is to lose buttons or your clothes.
Bugsby-That is true. but this girl wears SUE
penders.-( Trttsburg Chronicle.
A Boston man. who has been visiting In Chicago.
declares that city, and not Boston. 10 be the home 81
big hifalutn' words. In that city, he says they
have viaducts and auditorums, while here In Boston
bridges and assembly rooms and schools nre plenty
good enough. We have mill-dam and Brighton
Road and they have Grand Boulevard they have Q
Lake and have a Frogpond their children plunge
around in nataoriums while 60 to swimming
school,
There Is "A young fellow In a safest. wholesale
house who Is not particularly strong on spelling.
The other day he made out shipping bill ior
fourty' barrels OF -four. When his employer called
his attention to the peculiar spelling Of the worS
forty he said: "Oh. yes: how very careless OF mo.
/ left out the ghl--(IIarford Post.
The annual reunion OF the Billings family will no
held In Tlnghast's parlors, No. 237 Westminster w..
Providence, II. l., September o. All members OF the
family are invited to be present.
Miss De Trop had on the longest gloves last nisNt
that ever saw. She buttoned them from her wrist
to her elbow , A.,
That's nothing My girl buttons hers all the
way from home 10 the theatre. "-(Chcaso News Rec
ord.
During the last hundred years. the total number
Of patents granted 453,044.
at must be dreadful when a professional singer
knows She has lost her Voicel' -.
But II Is still more dreadful when she Is nov
aware Of the fact ~ (lIumorislsche Baeter
The state flower OF Oregon Is the blossom OF the
Wild grape
the hot spell u guest said 10 him
This weather Is pretty hot isnt II. Joseph !,
I" BE- iabers." he responded. d" hot Is only nickname
for it."-(Detrol Free Press.
The other day Missouri man ate eleven Plates Of
ice-crcam at sitting As he popular. In spite
Of this chuckle headed act his funeral Was largely Al
tended.
Jacl-I know what I'D nike to look at you foe.
ELECTROMAGNETIC Couris.