davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Syrup

/ must say a word as to the eff
fcacy of German Syrup. / have
used it in my family for Bronchitis,
the result of Colds, with most ex-
cellent success. have taken it my
self for Throat Troubles, and have
derived good results therefrom.
therefore recommend 1t to my neigh
bors as an excellent remedy in such
cases. James +. Durette, Earlys-
Vile, ". Beware of dealers who
offer you something just as good. "
Always insist on having Boschee's
German Syrup. ~
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
SOME BORROWED JESTS.
HUMOROUS SELEcTIo MS FROM
WITTY EXCHANGES.
The Freako and Folbles OF Human
Nature as Seen by the
Humorlst.
Jumping at Conclusions.

Wife Ito husband who has just re-
turned home): whats the news
from town."
Husband; Nothing"
"of course not. Oh, we'll, there is
never any news for a woman unless
she finds it out for herself"
After a long silence the husband
breaks in with: at does seem to me
people ought to be more careful"
"What about?"
81 was thinking OF something that
occurred last night. Jack Baxter and
his family sat out in the garden until
quite late, and when Baxter got up
and went into his room he had not
noticed that his prankish littleson had
slipped away. Just as Baxter stepped
into his room he heard something
under the bed-in fact, saw something
and thinking that s'robber had Sc
GREETED himself there, he seized a pistol
and fired under the bed, and"
"Merciful goodnessl and shot his lit.
tie SOM"
"Who said he shot his SOM"
"You said his son went under the
bed"
II didn't"
"Whnt did you say2"
II said that he did not notice his
son when he went into the ROOM"
"And wasn't the boy under the
bed?"
"No; cat was under the bed"
"You are the most hateful man l
ever saw"
"Why so? Just because the boy did
not go under the bed and get shot? l
had nothing to do with it, assure
YOU"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
A Harvard Students Remedy for
Insomnia.

I can't get to sleep. I try every
thing. Icount up to hundred and
look at one spot on the ceiling and
say my prayers forward and tHer
backward, and then l think OF she g1FS}
going over fence, but it isn't any
use.
Then as Pm tossing around l think
l hear some one saying George, get
up; it's half-past T."
"All right; in q minute"
George, get up, or you'll be late"
"Oh, no; l won't be late. Just few
minutes longer"
George, you've got to be Mt the Of
fee at 8. You'd better hustle"
"Oh, all right. Right away. So
comPble here-can't-m-m.m-pret'
soon-m-m-m-hgnor. hgnor-hgnor. -
blessed sIeep.)-Harvard Lampoon
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

1t May Be Interesting 90 Know
That when excursion rates are made ~
Chicago for people who live In tho ea1G, to
enable them to attend thu Worlds fair
next year. it is contemplated BY the west
ern roads to also make excursion rates frOm
Chicago to all principal business and tour
ist points in the west, northwest and south.
west, so that those who desire 10 speAd q
few weeks among their friends m she
Great West may have an opportunity OF Sd
expense. 1t may DO we'll to consider this
subject In advance Of actual time of start
ing, and the Chicago, Milwaukee \ 81
Paul Railway Co. has Issued maps And
timetables and other Instructive FUAdlnG
matter, which 1t will be glad to furubjA
free OF expense upon application by postal
card addressed to GEO. II. HEAFFoRD
General Passenger Agent Chicago, Ill.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Both the method and results when
Syrup of Figs is taken; it is pleasant
and refreshing to the taste, and acts
gently yet promptly on the Kidneys,
Liver and Bowels, cleanses the sys-
tenn efectually, dispels colds, head
aches and fevers and cures habitual
constipation. Syrup of Figs is the
only remedy of its kind ever pro
duced, pleasing to the taste and &C.
reptable to the stomach, prompt in
It's action and truly beneficial in its
effects, prepared only from the most
healthy and agreeable substances, its
many excellent qualities commend it
TO all and have made it the most
popular remedy known.
Syrup of Figs is for sale in Doc
and 81 bottles by all leading drug
gigta Any reliable druggist who
may not have it on hand will pro
cure it promptly for any one who
wishes to try it. DO not accept any
substitute.
CALIFORNIA RIO syrup CO.
SAN FRANCISCO, CAL.
LOUISVILLE, Ky. NEW Y0RK. Nh
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
Paying TOO Much.

First Beggar Woman-What do you
pay day for the hire OF that brat?
Second Beggar Woman-Fifty cents,
First Beggar Woman-That's too
much. For that money you can hire
a deformed husband, blind in both
eyes. 1 don't see how you can lay up
any money, when you pay Gfty cents
for a child that is not even deformed,
and hasn't got single sore on it,"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
A Fine Legal Point.

Thetramp was before the examin-
ing court for stealing a horse.
Guilty or not guilty." asked the
Court.
Not guilty, Yer Honor" was the
prompt response.
Weren't you caught riding the
horse?"
Eyes, Yer Honor"
"Did you buy him?"
mo, Yer Honor"
cor borrow him?"
mo, Yer Honor"
"Then you must have stolen him."
II didn't Yer Honor"
"What do you callit them"
81 don't know, Yer Honor" and
heprisoner was puzzlsd. "It's this
way. was goin' along the road and
the horse was goin' the same way, an
/ just got on him an rid him. Now,
if had got on him an rid him t'other
way: you might call that stealth; but
l didn't. Now what do you call it,
Yer Honor?"
The Court took it under advise
ment,-Detroit Free Press.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
A Fllmsy Excuse.

Judge ito prisoner)-Have you
something to add for Jour defense?
Prisoner-Yes Judge l desire to
have ths Rew law applied to me-,
JUDGE don't understand you.
Prisoner ask to be expelled from
the country. | recently came over
from Hamburg, and have probably
got cholera germs.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
Faint Praise.

Musician; "Well, doctor, what do
you say to my compositions"
Critic: "What DO say to them?
Well, they will be played when Beetho-
ven, Schubert, Wagner, ETC., are for
gotten"
Musician: Realty"
Critic: Eyes, but not before"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
A Point In IIusbandrv.

(Which weeds are the easiest to
kill?" asked young Flickers OF Farmer
Sassafras, as he watched that good
man at his work.
Widows weeds" replied the
farmer. you have only to say wilt
thou and they wilt."-Detroit Free
Press.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
Feminine Curiosity.

Madge: "Do you really love me?"
Arthur: "You know l do Madge;
but why do you ask me so often?'
Madge: "Iyell will tell you. I've
been reading the book called Court
ships Criticism; OF, Lovemaking
Made Easy and want to see wheth-
er you'll ever answer the question in
the words used by the author"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
Somewhat Different.

Van Braam, somewhat near.sight.
eds that Larimer talking to Miss
Belefield?
Dinwiddie-No; it is Miss Bellefeld
talking to Larimer.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
The Cunning Maid.

Mistress-Did you post the letter.
Maid-Yes, Sonora.
Mistress-Then why have you
brought me back the fifteen confines |
gave you for the stamp?
Maid-I slipped it in the box when
they weren't looking. Las Noticias.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

II the little cOnscences of some men car
make towards of them, think how n wild
broom with mad woman behind 1t must
make them quake.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
HIS Mask Off.

Her Adorer-"I want to speak to
you, sir, for q moment"
Her Father, in an irascible mood
Business or love-"
Her Adorer-"Business. want to
marry your daughter. New York
Herald.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Whoopihg-cough, Group, sore-throat in
nuenza, bronchitis, cold and cough are at
once relieved and positively and perma-
nently cured by Dr. Bulls Cough Syrup,
the Incompatible remedy for all pulmonary
and throat affections.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Ask your doctor what hap
pens to cod-liver oil when it
gets inside of you.
He will say it is shaken
and broken up into tiny
drops, becomes an emulsion /;
there are other changes, but
this is the first.
He will tell you also that
it is economy to take the oil
broken up, as it is in SCOTS
Emulsion, rather than bur
den yourself with this work.
You skip the taste too.
Let us send you an inter-
esting book on CAREFUL LIv-
ING; free.
seOTr & BOwNE, Chemists, I5a South sth Avenue,
New York.
Your druggist keeps Scouts Emulsion Of cod.liYer
aH--aIl dr,,gTirtu ,,,.-,,,. -. A. A.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

People call it backache and do nothing
for ituntll the doctor Ia called and he pro-
nounces 1t rheumatism. IL they had used
Salvation Oil in time the Doctors bill could
have been saved.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

THE GETTING 1T DOWN
Is bad enough, with the ordi-
nary pill. But tho having II
down is worse. And, after
all tho disturbance, there's
only a little temporary good.
From beginning 70 end, DR..
Pierce's Pleasant Pellets ard
better. They're tho smallest
and easiest TO take - tiny,
sugar coated grnnules that
any child Is ready for. Then
they do their work so easily
and so naturally that II lasts.
They absolutely and perman-
entity cure Constipation, In
lg.-L.AG-.. nEaG- AAA.V
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Sick and Bilious Headaches, and all derange
ments Of the liver, stomach and bowels
They're guaranteed to give satisfaction, Oh
your money Is returned.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

that he didn't marry her for her mon.
ey.
Jack-How?
HarrS--To show her how little he
cared for it, he spent every cent she
had.-Truth.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Cheap venlson at the restaurants is sell
dom deer.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Mrs. WInslOw's Soothing Syrup for
children teething, aoftens the gums, reduces indiana
ion, allayB pain, cares wind collie. $50 bottle.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
A Now Point in IInm.

There is no reason to believe that the
devil was ever married. We never heard
Of any divorce proceedings against him.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
1t May BE Interesting to Know

A man who shutters conveys hlS thoughts
by limited express.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Bakers Norwegian Cod Liver OF
Quickly relieves throat and lung senseB aud im-
parts vigor aud new life. Sold By druggists.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Lusber; the tramp, to professor OF
natural history-"What yer lost,
Pard?"
Professor Natural History-"Why,
saw a very curious sort Of snake
here just minute ago."
Lusher, who has seen curious rep
tiles too, in very awed tones-"Ye
amt a-tryin' T. find him agin, are ye,
pard?"
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Me-Shes avery upright young lady.
She-Yes, but she's bent on matrlmony.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
AilIad 10 the NohIlItv.

Dukane-Why is pugilism called
"the noble" art OF self-defenseH
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Gaswell-Perhaps, it is because
"dukes" figure in it SO prominent.
ly.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

THE MAKERS of DR.. Snge's Catarrh
Remedy say: "If we can't cure your
Catarrh no matter what your case Is,
We'll pay you $500 In cash." Now you
can see what is said of other remedies,
and decide which is most likely to cure
you. Costs only 50 cents.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
Omaha Business Houses.
ga ORCHARD FURNITURE,
81, SSp {, c GSE , ILITSTRA- CURTAINS.
' n',I H''' Dr.. Judd SIN '1! s'ia
Will Cure in Nearly All CasOS.
ELECTRIC BELTS.

Where The system lacks electric force which
Me- iciuo these belts supply nj once and recOv-
Fails. cry II sure to follow Our new i'm
proved Electric Belta are Batteries and Belts
combine generating sufficient electricity 70 pro-
duce shock. In ordering give price Of belts
(Sf 90, 50 co. Sc. 90 SIS ool waist measure, aud
full particulars Sold on the following terms.
months trial ifthey prove satisfactory Agents
wanted.
BUTTE Cry Mont Jan. IS, Iso2 within the
last eighteen months we have taken in over 900
for Judds Electric Belts and rrusses, and have
never had a single complaint, but have had
many compliments passed upon them.
y. NJ. NEBRo DRU3 Go.
Cures Lame Back Kidney and Liver Complaint,
Indigestion, Dyspepsia, Loss Of vitality and al
Female Weaknesses. Address
JUDD ELECTRIC COMPANY, Omaha, Neb.
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

seoTr & BOwNE, Chemists, rJs South sthAvenus,
New York.
Your druggist keeps SCOTS Emulsion Of cod.liYer
oii--al druggists everywhere do. g..
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21
How He Proved It.

Harry-BlOwitz proved to his wife
The Goodland republic. [volume] (Goodland, Kan.) 1891-1907, 1892-10-21

Wife Ito husband who has just re-
turned home): whats the news
from town."
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-04-29

twenty miles day. Such
q pioneer party ought to make a very
good trail here in two weeks, or a
month ut least. From tho big lake
there is uninterrupted river navigation
to Boring Sea in the summer months,
although it is possible that one point
the Rink Rapids-may give trouble at
certain unfavorable stages of the
water 1t is, therefore, u mere matter
of sufficient commercial interests being
developed in the Yukon basin to justi-
fy the making and maintaining of such
a trail in the spring and summer
months. The Alaskan city to be bene-
fitted by this is plainly Juneau.
But the greatest benefit that this
route will ever confer is, think, in u
railway; and not 50 very far in the fu-
ture. either. To the causual observer,
limiting the considerations to the coun-
try directly drained, there is
not great deal to tempt a
railroad into Alaska, but as two-thirds
of our western States and Territories
were developed by railways looking not
to what was in them altogether but to
some great terminus beyond, so Alaska
may hope for one on the same princi-
pie. The great Siberian railway, ter
minating at Nladivostoll, is assured
and will be built, it is officially as
serted, in twelve years. The nearest
perpetually open winter harbor to it in
America, attainable by railway, is in
the Juneau vicinity, and by railway
down the Tallou river. There is abso-
lutely n, point west of this unless Der
ing Strait, thirty-siX miles across, should
be tunneled. a far too formidable I'M
dertalling for the advantage to be
gained. From Juneau to VladivostolS
the sea voyage can be made by an At
lantic ocean greyhound" in a week,
and at all seasons of the year. The
construction of railway along
the Tallou through the Alaska
coast range would cost less,
believe. than the average road
through the Allegheny Mountains. The
great inland plateau gained the con-
struction to any point on the Canadian
Pacific would be about equivalent to
that on our great western plains, OF
which this plateau after all is but a
no thern extension. The most likely
objective point on the Canadian Pacific
to strike would be Winnipeg, busy,
solid city. with many direct railroad
connections to the very heart of the
United States; in fact, this Alaskan
road would he a natural branch of the
Canadian Pacific that could operate it
to better advantage than could be done
as an independent line This branch
would be less INSTRUCTED by snow than
the main line. which again has less
rival difficulties than lines further
south the line Of ma Nirnrrn SNOW oh
struction for North America lying some
where nearer the central parallel of the
United States.
FREDERICK SCHwATRA.
Com'd'g n. Y. Ledger Expedition.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-04-29

ne-half mile; the second portage one
and n half miles, while Third Lake.
gave us Two and a half miles. good
breeze to sail it with, and a two-pound
piclserel, another of about the same
size getting away. Here also we met
our last party of outward bound fur
traders. our party securing some needed
moccasins and little dried moose meat
from them. They were surely wild
enough creatures, the grown ones ex-
trernely shy, while the dogs skulked
away growing, and the children ran
bowling from us as soon as the two
parties met.
The third portage was two and q hall
miles across, while Fourth Lake" gave
us an hour and half on its waters,
and as this brought us up to O'Clock
we went into camp. Although
the packers had carried only at
The short portages their ankles
were black. bruised and badly swollen
and it was evident we were not reach
ing the end of their journey any too
soon. Their foJtgear was nothing but
a mass of tied up rags and buokskin-
believe that ninc-tenths OF their trouble
arose from the doubling Of packs and
that the trail is comparatively easy
where one only Is carried by Indians
used to this work. Tho fourth portage
was but 4 mile and Fifth Lake" the
same distance, while the fifth portage
WAS only a third as far. This over and
by the middle of tho forenoon we stood
overlooking Ahk-Klain, which trans
lated means THE Big Lake" in the
Flinllit tongue (Ahk-Lake; Klain, or
Klane, Big.)
| had thought the packers would
take rest for day or two, or at least
for the afternoon of the 10th, but they
were SO anxious to overtake the
last party of Takons we had passed
that they got away at In
that afternoon. They had per-
formed a Herculean task indeed
and deserved well of the fruits Of the
undertaking whatever thereafter may
show for this. And now on
the shores of the great inland
lake it may be well to take
a retrospect of the trail, now for the
first time mapped, and see whether
there is anything in it either for the
present or the future. The overland
trail was 50 miles long and some IS on
the river, or Il rough l25 miles alto
gether | believe that "a powerful light
draught river steamer can ascend 10
the head OF canoe navigation, or ut least
to the confluence of the main branches
still, the report of n good river boat
man for all navigable months of the
year would be the best information on
which to test this, and would not be
hard to obtain. From either point a
pack-mule trail to Ahk-klain cnn be
easily made With pioneering parties
of fifteen to twenty men l have seen
pack trains taken through equiva-
lent country, keeping up with
cavalry commands averaging ovei
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-04-29

First published april %. LS9)
State of Kansas g
Allen county
In the District court for said county.
l. Hobart plaintiff,
vs..
Luther z Kindred. Laura
Kindred Harmon Hobart,
The unknown heirs OF
Daniel WOrich, deceased,
The unknown heirs of De-
lila RitZInan. deceased,
W Cooper. Elmer O. WOr-
ich, Earl G.. WOrich and
Ada WOrich, defendants.
Said defendants and especially the unknown
heirs of Delilah RitZman, deceased, the un-
known heirs of Daniel WOrich, deceased. W
Cooper Elmer O WOrich, Earl WOrich and Ada
Worich will take notice that they have been
sued in the above named court for the fOrecIos-
ure of u mortgage upon the sOutn
half of the south west quarter OF sec
ton 49, township a. range 10. east OF the
9Th principal meridian. in Allen county. Kansas
heretofore given by Luther Z. Kindred anu
wife To Angel MatthewsOn Il Company ON tne
first day of March lSS7, and must answer the
petition filed therein bv said plalntlil IOI
foreclosure of said mortgage on or before tnS tth
day OF June, \ ID lSJ1, or said peuuOn VIII u
taken as true and Judgment for platinum IN saiu
action for a foreclosure Of said mortgage VIII DC
rendered accordingly. II a E M iNu.,
Attest: Any ior PiainAH'
NJ p Jacoby, Clerk
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-04-29

them. They are the King boats of
Kalamazoo, Michigan, and in their con-
struction are quite unique. making
them very strong, carrying readily a
ton each, and weighing just over 100
pounds apiece. There is a double
Jacket, both of which havs 70 be ripped
TO sink the boat, the outer one very
heavy canvass and the inner one water
proof. l had named them: Andrew
Allen Bonner, Robert Edwin Bonner
and Frederic Bonner. after the
patrons of the expedition; the
editors and propIietoIs of The New
York Ledger At First Lake" we
put up the Frederic Bonner in forty
minutes and there were two movements
with each hand at the mosquitoes to
every one towards building up the boat
First Lake was two and half miles
long; the first portage about half
vile oyer Second Lake gave us only
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-04-29
Pears
Soap

What is wanted of
soap for the skin is to
wash it clean and not
hurt it. Pure soap does
that. This is why we
want pure soap; and,
when we say pure, we
mean without alkali.
Pears is pure; no al
kali in it; no free alkali.
There are a thousand
virtues Of soap; this one
is enough. You can trust
a soap that has no biting
alkali in it.
All sorts of stores sell
it, especially druggists;
all sorts of people use it
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-04-29
The Population OF lola

Is about 1000, and we would say at
least one-half are troubled with some
affection of the throat and lungs, as
those complaints are, according to
statistics, more numerous than others.
We would advise all our readers not
to neglect the opportunity to call on
their druggist and get a bottle OF
Kemp's Balsam for the throat and
lungs. Trial size free. Large bottles
soc and 81. Sold by all druggists.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-04-29
Publication Notice.

lFiTst pHbIishfd A riI ., 1872
In the District Court within and for the county
of Allen in the State of Kansas.
Mollie Ward, plaintiff
vs..
Anderson Ward, defendant
Anderson Ward will take notice that the said
MOllie Ward, plaintiff. did on the 2ird day OF
March, lsg2 file her petition i'll said District
court within and tor the county of Allen. in the
State of Kansas against the said Anderson
Ward defendant and that the said Anderson
Ward must answer said petition filed as afore-
said on or before the 18th day of june lS!2 or
said petition will be taken as true and judg
ment rendered in said action against said de-
PENDANT for divorce. II A. ENING,
4ttoest: Atty for plaintiff
NJ = JacOby. Clerk N.Y.
The Iola register. [volume] (Iola, Allen County, Kansas) 1875-1902, 1892-04-29
ON ALASKAN LAKES.
ScHWATKA AND PARTY REACH
CRYSTAL WATERS.
SourneyIng Over the silvery Waters In
Canvas Boats-What a Hallway Could
Do for Our Acquisition From Russis-
The siberian Railway Project.
No. s International Press AssOciatiOn.l

AHK-KLAIN CTHE BIG LAKE,, BRITISH
n. w. T., June 10, 1s9l.-After Paddy S
return we all thought the food ques-
zion was settled, but inside OF two or
three days it was gone again. and we
were issuing to the Indian packers from
our own scant supplies. There was
much dead timber passed through the
next day June 1O), but it did not seri-
ously interfere with us. The only
trouble was the slight one that when
grouse were flushed in it they in