Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-07-03
ASKED INTO A VAULT
BOTH THE MAN INVITED AND tbs
OCCUPANT DEPART IN HASTE.
Came Near Drowning, But Only Thought
Of HIS New Hat-should Die for Their
Cauntry-Idiers Thoughts.

picts the wierd labOrers with an accuracy
which is truly wonderful. The immortal
bard represents the makers Of mans last
earthly abode as chirpy and lively even
while engaged in their work, and paints
them ne absolutely devoid Of superstition.
And so they are, az q general rule, but this
very carelessness on their part gave two of
them quite a bad scare some time ago and
had them scamperng around Hollywood as
fast as legs could take them. The men
had Just finished neat, well-itting, ana
commodiOus grave. aud were trudging
along through the cemetery when heavy
raIn-stOrm overlook them. They corn
menced running, and one. being rapid
rIoyer, forged ahead of his companion aud
soon got out Of his sight. But the storm
grew worse and the shower more violent.
20 he decided TO seek shelter ana seeing
vault which was open be slipped into 1t
in order TO save himself from a thorough
drenchlng. Meanwhile grave-digger No.
2 came along. and his companion IN the
sepulchre. though himself unobserved
could see his friend, so he cried, Come II
out the wet 1.-THE man on the outside heard
the voice emanating from the tomb, but
could not account for II and he became
horribly frightened. Instead OF accepting
the invitation to rid himself of further
pluvlal discomforture he took 70 his heels.
screaming for help and presenting q PIC
ture Of abiect terror. The animated ghost
on the inside OF the vault saw his COM
panIOn's Generalization and not knowing
why be exhibited so much fear became
alarmed himself, and also concluded that
MS safety lay in flight. And SO the two
grave-diggers had a frst-cass scare. anc
one ran because he was frightened while
the other initiated his example without ex-
actly knowing why he did 50.
-
Self-preservati0n is said TO be the first
law Of nature. but there occurred n rather
singular exception 10 this rule few days
ago. A party OF young men had been over
on one Of the islands bathing, and IN the
crowd was one individual who proudly
wore q new straw-hat. which, according TO
his pecUliar ideas. became him hand
sOmeiy and adorned his face even a. white
wash bcdecks backyard fence. While
the boys were crossing some OF the rocks
IN the river the happy possossor % the
new piece Of headgcar became 80 absorbed
IN the contemplation OF hrs elegant ap-
pearance that no lost his footing and
plunged headlOug into the rapidly
flowing stream below The river WAS
exceedingly swift and deep where the
accident occurred. and tho unfortunate
individual. like fly IN plate OF Bruins
wick stew. created tremendous splash
"a he pierced the surface of the tu-bid
water. His companions beheld the cataS-
trophn With horror and terror'rendered
them bgeathle,s when they saw { he stream
close DER his kicking form. suddenly the
sinking man rose To the surface and erred
in prolonged howl, Save my nat, Save
my hat" This wise lnluctlon brought
the spectators Ia their senses, and turning
their efforts To the drowning man th'v
fished him out and also recovered ms >.
cious headgear. The rescued citizen G-r-
senfed a most detected appearance and
seized with fit of green and yellow
melancholy he piteously confessed to his
companions that the thing which harraSsed
HIM most was the fear that his wife would
think he was intoxicated when the ncci-
dent occurred. He refused 10 be COM
forted" and as he sadly sauntered home,
o stream OF water dripping rom his mos.
tened person. told the outside world OF
the narrow escape be had.
-
The poet Horace has made the assertion
that 1T Is sweet and honorable 10 die for
ones country and while he never yerl-
fed the statement by any actual expert
mouts IN the matter there must be truth
IN what be SAYS. His theory Is good and
its accuracy should be tested. Among the
victims 10 be inundated on the shrine Of
our iatherland ! propose 70 offer mp the
man who persists IN talking politics.
Whether YOU seek the retirement OF q
back seat on a street-car or trudge through
dark and deserted throughfares he hunts
Won out like tho ubiquitous tly, and plant
mo himself bv vOur s'le proceeds TO bur
row INTO your Dram with his lnterrOgatlons.
40 matter Il the newspapers have
published seventy columns about the
two convenron-tha doesn't satisfy
him-for there Is always something
else he wants 10 know about. Inc
ingenuity with which he diylses CUES
tions Is something absolutely remarkable,
while the persstency with which he asks
them Is exasperating beyond conception.
Your knowledge may be universal ana
Your political acumen miraculous. but he
can ALWAYS put some query which Will
stump YOU. And yet while he apparently
seeks information you can see that he
thinks he knows it ALL" Yes. ] say let
these men die for their country-it will do
their country good. DO not use violence
against them yourself. Quietly decoy
two of a kind - III room together and
then leave them. They will talk each
other 10 death.
DO you see that bricklayer ?" said IA
eilded youth to me few days ago as
placidlv lounged on the street waiting tor
something to turn mp. / looked toward
the Handsome building now IN course OF
erection and responded III the affirmative.
The knight Of the troWel, who smoked an
ancient pipe. was certainly not very pre-
possessing fellow. lie had on blue over
ais aud a coarse shirt OF the same color.
while his shoes. long since ignorant Of
n k.1 lannpta ra1 with and
wear. Fashion will not allow that chap
to wear those clothes much longer," re
sumed ms friend, who was al authority
mon the modes. | inquired why the ca
pricious dame" would force the brIckiayer
10 cast aside his garments, and this Is the
explanation my companion gave me :;
There Is at present rapid tendency
among the upper classes 70 assume Tue
negiio,e style in masculine attire, and such
thing es boiled shirt or white laun-
dered collar is decidedly behndhand.
Neatly polished shoes are horrible-yes,
horrible. 10 be uD with the times YOU
must have russell fOOtcear, checked or Olue
shirts. lOOse-htting coats, belt Of some
kind, u carelessly-tied cravat, general
slip-sloppv appearance. and. above all, you
must smoke pipe A year or so hence we
Will discard coats altogether, and already
the time has nearly come when blue-
leans overals will be considered Just
tho thing In trousers Then that brick
LAYER will have 10 change his gsrb or
enlist in the upper social circles We will
adopt "A style oil attire similar to that he
now has, whilo ne in turn Will be forced
TO 90 10 work in a black cutaway coat
white Numbered linen, patent-leather
shoes. a silk hat, and Il four-ln-hand tie.
While ct his vocation he will DO compelled
TO smoke cigars or cigarettes" When
look upon the many curious innovations
in dress | am almost forced 10 conclude
that the prophecies OF my fr end viii come
true. The IDLE RgPOsIER.
Sudden Death of Mr.. John BrigE!wen
correspondence OF the Richmond Dispatch.l
S.orTsvILLE, July 2.-Mr. John Bright
well. a well-kuoWn citizen OF fluyanna
county, died at his home, at Bremo Bluff,
this morning at 6 O'Clock. lie was up and
off