, 1892-03-20

bacon fur breakfast, an whar he could
drop ten cents into de church contribushun
box, an den Vanity stepped in to wreck
him. He bought TO boxes Of paper collars
at one time; he ordered ice cream fur sum
day; he lowed his wife to gin a high tea
on her birthday; he chen dun rented a pi-
ano at five dollars per month fur his gal
Liza to drum on. In jest six weeks de ell
der, as yo' all know, was Knocked out an
appealin to dis club to end him money to
git his dawg out o. de pound"
The elder, who occupied one of the front
stools, blew his nose and wiped his eyes
and evidently felt broken up, and Brother
Gardner went on:
Take d. case Of Samuel Shin. Nobody
In dis world thought him anything mo-
dan common. He was sort o. scrubbin
around on two dollars a week an mighty
glad to git a squar' meal, when his aunt
down in Arkansas died an left him twenty
seven dollars in cash. De mint Samuel
got hold of dat money a great change dun
cum ober him. He walked up an down
befo' de banks; he talked of rentjn a box
in the possofice; he priced obercoats as
high as sixty dollars. l advised him to
hide dem twenty-seven dollars in an oyster
can till he had got ODER de shock of sudden
wealth, but Vanity wouldn't low him to.
He plunged. He reckoned dat he could
buy half de airth. He carried hisself as
stiff as a poker, an he wouldn't speak to
sartin member OF dis club who doan' war
alligator shoes. Whar' am Brudder Shin
nowi Vanity wrecked him. He sits ober
dar by de alley doah, crushed, broke al
achin to ask Giveadam Jones to lend him
nine cents to make a new start in life"
Samuel hung his head to escape observa-
ton, and several members acted as IL they
would like to get outdoors before anything
further was heard to drop.
"Waydown Bebee, our secretary, am not
yere dis eavenin," observed the president,
as he glanced over at the spot usually oc-
cupied by that individual. Am his wife
deadi Am his cabin burned down wild nc
insurance. Was he called to Chicago or
Buffalo by de suddenness of a telegraph
No, sab Six weeks ago while he was con
tentedly peggin along on seven dollars per
week a white man told him dat he looked
like Cicero. Brudder Bebee doan' know
Cicero from Gineral jackson, but he felt
proud and fattered. He went right out
an bought real linen collars an a fifty cent
necktie, an some ha'r lie an a watch chain,
an next day he quit his job an walked
around talkin bout free trade an tellin
allied de kentry. / met him in a feed
store, whar' l was buyin stuff fur my
chickens, an he told me he was dun gwine
to BEGUN a lawyer. Vanity was climbin
I'll ODER MIN. ne Am NOT yore DonlBnt DC
case he didn't like to cum b'arfut, an his
wife's shoes am too small fur him. He am
a finanshul wreck of de furst water, an
Vanity am de cause OF 1t. He was BON TO
be Waydown Bebee; he sighed to be Cicero.
Result-bankruptcy."
Colonel Kyann johnson now made a
slide for the door, but before he reached it
Brother Gardner stopped him and aid
zone mo case dat Of Kurnel johnson.
A month ago de kurnel was workin in a
wood yard up nigh my cabin. He was dom
so well dat heaps o. folks was jealous OF
him. Had he kept right on he would have
becum de Standard lie company of dat
n~ayborhood; but in an evil moment some
body diskivered de fact dat his ha'r was
almost straight an his butes only No. 9s
Dat settled him. He quit his job an walked
around arm in arm wild Vanity. He let
his wife buy lace curtains and plush xiv
cred cheers, an he hung around de city
hall an gin his views on de Gillian quesh-
un. His career was brief. II de city hall
was offered iii tomorrer for a dime he
couldn't raise de cash."
The colonel got up to make some sort of
reply, but words failed him n he re-
sumed his seat with a bang and struggled
with something which appeared like emo
ton, but might have been collie.
"Darfo' l say to you an / say it in all
airnestness," concluded the president, ito
bewar' OF Vanity. 1t am wuss dan a thief
in de night. Drink steals away yo' brains
fur only half a day, but Vanity takes pos
session of yo'r hull head fur weeks at a
time. Be proud of de fact dat yo' wasn't
bon wild a short leg or a bumped back or
one eye, but doan' let vanity make yo' be-
lieve dat dar was any speshual reason fur
yo'r entrance into this world. We am all
jest common GUILD folkes, sorter waitin
around to see what's gwine to happen on
de next change of de moon. We hain't no
call to be purity or proud, and de world
doan keer whether we sot own at home
IN cane seat cheers or red plush sofas"