The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1892-12-31
puNoEMr pARAoRAPAs.

---"Whats that noiae up-stairs9"
"Eellie is singing to kill time till her
beau comes "Well. time seems to die
hery., doesn't it?"-N. Y Press.
--"No matter what subject you talk
on my friend BillSins has the matter at
his fingers ends" "Is that SOP "Yes
hes deaf and dumb "-Tit-Bits.
--"Ignernt2 said old Mr. Jason, speak
ing of neighbor "W'y, that man
doesn't know as much as a--as a-as a
astronomer indianapolis Journal
--He-"But don't you think it wrong
to have too many strings to your bowP'
She-Ah, yesl But have my beauX on
string. you seel'-Harvard Lampoon.
---"Do they ring n bell TO awaken you
at your boarding houseP' "No, we get
up when we hear the cook pounding
the beefstealS Y. Press.
Young Staylate-"I should very
much like to meet your father some
day." Amy-"Well, if you will stay
about an hour longer he will be coming
down to breakfast t"-Ilarper's Bazaar.
Little Dot-"O, mamma, there's
sign Puppies for Sale Won't you buy
me one?" Mamma--''Wait till you are
little older, dear" Little Dot-"But
then they'll be dogs. lid Bits.
-She-"So a sinecure is q position in
which person gets the salary another
earns?" He-"Precisely, my love" She
--"That's the kind of job want" He
--."You have it. dearest. detroit
Tribune
Not All Alike First Boy-"Do all
office-holders get big salaries?" Second
Boy-"No. Some hold positions of
honor" Don't they get anything?"
''Only what they steal."-Good News.
The Reverse of Romance. Pub
lisher-"Is your novel realistic?" Au-
| thor-"It is. The hero and the heroine
get married in the first chapter and are
unhappy ever afterward. IN. Y.World.
-Travers-"This overcoat seems pret-
ty tight around the chest" Tailor
when you have taken the money out
Of your poclletbool1 to pay for it, sir, it
will fit all right "-Clothier and Fur
nisher.
Mrs Miggs' children look so
neglected, poor things; is she away?
mo, she is spending her time writing
those beautiful articles, How to Make
Home Attractive for the Children -
Inter Ocean.
Nothing New,-Mr West-"Gold &,
Stone are exhibiting the American hog
in gold and precious stones" Mrs.
West-"rhat's nothing new to women
who travel on the Broadway cars y
jewelers. Weekly.
-Master-"Of late you have brushed
my clothes in very superficial manner,
Johann" "Man Servant-"Well, but,
sir" Master-'Just look here;
found this six-pence still in my pocket
this morning. - Buntes Allerlei.
You should have heard me sing,
Let Me Dream last evening"" said the
young woman who vocalizes. 81 did,"
replied the young man whose room is
! just over the parlor piono, ''and it eX-
pressed my sentiments exactly. y
| Washington Star.
Mr. Einsteil "Vot does you do in
der evenings, Mr.. Solomons?" Mr.. Sol
omons-'T plays chess nit my wife"
Mr.. Einstein-"Vy do you likes chess?"
Mr.. Solomons-"O, because it is so like
beezness. First l takes a pawn, and
den my wife redeems it; and den she
takes a pawn, and I thinks l am in de
shop "-Princeton Tiger.
Why He Did 1.-THE girl was very
rich and the young man was poor, but
honest She liked him, but that was
all and he knew it. One night he had
been little more tender than usual.
"You are very rich," he ventured.
Yes" she replied, frankly. 81 am
worth million dollars" "And l am
poor" "Yes." ''Wnl you marry me?"
"No." 'T thought you wouldn't"
Then why did you ask me?" 20, just
to see how a man feels when he loses
million" and the girl smiled. Detroit
Free Press.