The Manitowoc pilot. [volume] (Manitowoc, Wis.) 1859-1932, 1892-05-12
WIT AND HI NOR.

A happy pare the old-fashioned ap-
plc-bee -LotreH courier.
Put 4 sinner where ne can't hide
and that's where hell begins.-Rdnis
Horn.
Persons on pleasure bent often get
badly doubled up Bi'aghomto" Re
pubiicuR.
The people who would have done so
and 20. il they had been there, never
get there RAMS Horn.
There are still too many people who
enjoy seeing tin can tied to the tail
Of some other mans dog. = Ram 5
Horn.
Pessimists should remember that one
OF the first things Adam did in Eden
was to attempt reform with his mouth.
Coiuptj"s Post.
Wooden shirts and a broken five
dollar bill must tie made OF the same
material, Judging from the way they
shrink. DaaSriIe Breeze.
When YOU want to cultivate man
it isn't good thing to harrow his
feelings and plant the seeds OF hatred
in his breast - Bingtamton Lcader.
Greenland has no eats. How thank
full the Greenlanders should be. I'M
agine cats in country where the
nights are six months long.-It-BttS.
The humorist may cudgel his brain
in vain to earn the laugh which any
ordinary man can raise by falling down
4 slippery walk. n Son1errIie Jourhat.
key Clipping a ring on her tinger)
Now we're engaged. Rebecca, AMID
we?" Rebecca Not TIL fader ex-
amines the ring, key. y. !. Herald.
Why DO you call your
horse Independence Day. Weeks
Because in every race enter him he
always comes in a glorious fourth. >
Rider and Dricer.
when | went away said the re-
turned wandercr, "Hardhit was crazy
over Miss Icely. Did he ever get cured
OF his fancy for herr" 20, yes; she
married him. y. !. Press.
Jessie You must be hard worker,
Mr.. Chapicy." Chapley What makes
you think that. Miss Jessie?' Jessie
y
made him tired. ~ l. Hcrala.
Princess Why did the
Emperor send the Grand Duke Petroy-
IA to Siberia?' Prince Sawdoffski -
The Duke casually alluded to his
Majesty as an old Czarline. " !.
sun.
Mr. De Peyster- Why. it, almost
IL by that clock on the mantel. | had
no idea il was 80 late. Are YOU sure
that clock is going2" Miss Rosebud
Yes, the clock is s0aclcjIe Jour
nal
Look here, George, am positively
tired Of Your talking love 10 me this
way every time you call" Marry me,
thcn.and LII never speak another word
Of love 70 you as long IS | hye."-N
l. Press
Jamison What's the matter. old
man? You look a. though YOU had
struck luck Jenkins 4 should say
have. My landlady has just warned me
that must pay up before | can leave"
Boston Post.
Wagaway-~ so YOU heard my lect-
.urcs on Miracles. Do Won know what
4 miracle i, my litt.o girl27 Bessie
%, YES. Ny sister said Il would be a
miracle if YOU didn't slav for dinner
today. lt-Bi>
what i, the name Of TRAIT lady who
has just finished singing" Miss
Swan" Well. if were in her place i
would prove IN exception to the gen
eral run Of swans. and die before |
sing. H9psr's Bear
Is this the man charged with pro-
fanity2" asked the Judge Il don't
think he is. yer Honor, replied the
policeman. He may have been, but
oi think most ~ it must have escaped
by this time. - Washington Star.
johnny" said the elder little
brother. Won must be sure not to ask
lot any Of the wild duck twice"
"Nhy?" Because | heard father tell
the company that they would have a
little game with limit TO it."-H'asb-
tRgtoH Star
Paw, said little Tommy Fig. Il
heard Mr.. Watts say that great mems
sons never did ANY good. amt
great mans son. am T." Up to : late
hour Mr., Eggs mind bad not found a
sufficiently diplomatic answer. - IL
dtGHapoliS Jouraal
That much Of mans wisdom is van
lty i illustrated III the ease Of the
man who has the grip, lie is the per-
son most interested. but he doesn't care
whether il i microbe or a herd of
elephants that is the matter with him.
-llaS4ingtoR Ssor
II was a bright Boston schoolgirl
WHO when asked hy her teacher 10 ex-
plain the meaning Of the shaksoearean
phrase, 40 To- exclaimed: %. that
! only the sixteenth century's expires
sion ct the nineteenth century's Come
of. BoStoi. Herald.