The Maryville times. (Maryville, Tenn.) 1884-1944, 1892-08-10
TALKS TO MOTHERS,
BY ONE OF THIN.
v.-THE Too-BusY MOTHER.


mother can make is allowing herself |
to be too much occupied with other
than her mothers cares Run away
now, mothers too busy." is often heard,
but to one who thinks what it means,
it IS among the ''saddest words OF
tongue or pen" Too busy to attend to
the one special and individual work
placed in her hands! Too busy--doing
what?
1t may be homework; it may be
cooking and baking, and keeping the
house in beautiful order, and preparing
great varieties of appetizing food for
the comfort and happiness of those
| very children. 1t may be sewing, max
ing their Clothes and ornamenting them
with stitching and trimming so that
they shall look as we'll as their neigh
bors. If this mother would only pause
and reflect, she might realize how
much less important are delicacies for
the stomach, and ruffles for the gown,
than food for the mind and culture for
the manners of the eager little qvas-
tloning beings now receiving the deep
est impressions Of their lives.
If resident of large city, where
woes and needs of all sorts constantly
appeal to the tender-hearted, it may be
philanthropic work that occupies her.
She may have been drawn by the bait
Of doing good" to others. This is a
subtle temptation, and she who has
yielded to it will probably think she is
doing the Lords work" and may even
be pulled up with an idea of her un-
selfshness. Nothing will shock her
more than to be told that she is entire
ly wrong. If she is working for one of
the many charitable institutions that
fill our understanding the labor and
the lives of thousands of women to run
them-she doubtless spends half her
time attending to some of the numer
Gus details of the business, and crowds
into the other half her social and home
duties, leaving everything possible to
be done by servants, and being of
course, 'too busy for 'mothering" her
babies.
In plain English, stripped of It's
glamours, she neglects her own most
sacred duty to attend to the work which
plainly is not hers to do. This may
sound severe; but is it not true? Not
to mention the criminal and the
vicious, does she not give to the i'm
provident, who hive let themselves be.
come burden on society, the thought
and time imperativcly needed for work
with the opening minds of her own
children? Thought and time which l
confidently assert are not hers to give,
for the simple reason that she is al
ready provided with task requiring
all the wisdom and all the energy she
has to give.
1t may be that the ''too busy"
mother is engrossed in art, or in some
other work. If this is necessary to her
support, her children are to be pitied;
but if it is for her own pleasure, or to
, make herself a name, it is great mis-
Jake. do not say that these ends are
in themselves unworthy, and we have
happily outlived the day of belief that
, woman's only duty is self-sacrifcc.
Again, the too busy" may be in pur.
suit of culture. A conspicuous example
Of this sort was woman noted far and
. wide for her brilliant intellectual at
tainmcnts; studies and writing filled
her days. Her only child was beauti-
ful boy who very early in life learned
the sad lesson that mother was always
too busy to participate in his joys and
sorrows. He was trained by his nurse
till big enough to run about and tyran'
= nize over her, when he took up the so.
) ciety of his mothers stableman. He
= spent hours and months and years inn
bibing the sentiments, the language,
. the tastes of his instructor. When the
: busy mother paused long enough in hei
studies to reflect that her son ought tc
go to school-behold he had been al
1 school for years! She sent him to be
l taught; he ran away from his teachers
She hired tutors; he bullied and drove
Y them off. He boldly announced his OPP
4 position to instructors of all sorts, anc
4 threatened to run away from home
Not to follow his career step by step
1t is enough to say that he utterly re
fused education, became a spendthrif
and vagabond of the lowest tastes
and at last brought his mother in sor
cow to her grave.
The mother who is too busy" may
be over fond of society, and for the
e feeting pleasures of social success may
;, throw away the deepest and pures
, happiness life can possibly give her
1 leaving the delight, no less than the
= duties, of motherhood, to a hiret
2 servant. Society in moderation is o.
great value to every mother. not onl.
as needed change from home cares
, to keep her bright and in touch will
!. the active world about her, but as /;
: school of manners for her children, ant
:. a proper place to introduce them whei
, grown.
Perhaps the busy mother-alas tina
should have to say tits devoted
to fancy work. and spends the hour
which might go to mental growth TO
0 herself or her children, in embroidery
Or in making crazy quilt" (craz.
woman's quilt would seem bette
0 name for it, Now fancy work i
: harmless, perhaps even useful. and
very little adds graceful and pretty
touch to a home, but as mania it i
lamentable, both to the perpetrato
who thus deliberately chooses to stun
her own intellectual growth, and Il
those who depend upon her for theirs