davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29
nIrnrnnrI We the undersigned were
QIIU HILL entirely cured of rupture by |
Hill IuIll DR.. j. Il. Mayer, sl Arch ST., |
IAO DhiIadolnhin p : .Innas l

Philips, kennet Square Pa; IT.. A. hreltZ,
Pa; Z. NJ. Small, Mount Alto, Pa;
i. II. KunkeI, 437 N. Tenth St, Allentown. Pa;
Rev. S. II. Shermer, Sunbury, Pail. L. Fehr,
1921 Chestnut St, Reading. Pa; ID; ] Deliett,
PA 5. Twelfth St, Reading, Pa; q Yates. 4s4
philadelphia; H. l.. Rowe, 500 Elm St, Read
ing, Pa; George and FIJI. Bnrkart, 4sa Locust
ST. Reading. Pa. Send for Circular.
Dr. Mayer is at Hotel Penn, Reading, Pa, ON
the second Saturday of each month. Call 10
see him. lf-Vit
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29
Do Your Own PAINTING.

VOU can get a half-pint can of sherwin
l. Williams r~eady-mixed liquid paint IN
IA colors or shades for bets, a pint for 2octs,
or more at less rates. a good brush for 10cts,
and find it not only u saving, but a pleasure
also. to brighten M such of your furniture or
housekeeping utensils as need it. Nearly
every home must have about it some of the
following articles which need painting:
Baby Carriage, Box or Bench, Tables,
Bucket or Barrel, Bird House, Cupboard,
Coal Box, Garden Tools, Hitcbieg Post,
Old Furniture, Window Sash, Blinds,
Flower Stand, W~ainscoating, Tubs,
Harrows, Plows, Pumps, Pals,
Chairs, Desk, Wagons, Etc.
Th paint is the very best, being mixed with
pure linseed oil, is a quick dryer, and gives q
high gloss to all work it is used on. Tn sher-
win Williams Company make the highest
grade paint on the market to-day, (all other
dealers are willing to own to this), and while
the price on some of their goods is a trifie
more, the covering qualities are greater and
the lasting qualities much more permanent.
Our store at the corner is painted with it.
You can see what 1t looks like. We are pre-
pared to furnish it from a half-pint can to
such quantities as might be required to paint
q town, at the manufacturers lowest rates.
Those who think OF painting might save
money by seeing us.
E. b. HUMPHREYS & CO.
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29

childrsu,s Coats, Misses Coats ana
dies Goats. the newest shapes ana
latest styles just from the w~orkroohis' ~
Humphreys' store on the corner.
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29
Going to the Fair.
fold Style.]

fold Style.]
When Me an my Ma an Pa went to the Fair,
Ma borried Mizz Rollins-uz rigg to go there.
Cause our buggy's fe,r, and Ma says, Mercy
sake.
1t wouldn'th hold half the folks she's go to take!"
An she took ,Marindy. IN James twins, an 10,
An Aunty Van Meters-uzg irls-an old Slo'
Magee, ats SO fat, come a-scrowdgin In there,
When Ne an my Ma and Pa went to the Fair!
The roads full o. loads full list ready to bust,
An all hot an smokin and chokin with dust
The VOLTS an their wagon, an N~rizentines, too
An horses list rared when the toot cars come
through.
An way from fur off we could hear the band
play.
An peoples all there nd list whoop an hooray!
An / stood on the dashboard. an Pa boost me
Most high as the fence, when we went to the
Fair.
An when we us there an inside, we could see
Where the flags on a pole where a shows 60
to be;
An boys up in trees, an the grea' big balloon
AT didn't goped up a tall, all afternoon!
An a man in the crowd there giyed money
away
An Pa says he druther earn his by the day
An he GIN me some, an says amt nothin there
Too good for his boy, when he went to the
Fair,
VISIT The Raggedy Man wuz there too. But
he says,
Don't talk Fairs to me. Child. I've went to
one; yes
An they wuz a thing there We rode and l
rode
An a thing-um-a-iing at ye blowed-an
bowed;
An they wuz a game AT ye played-an /
played
An a hitch in the same where ye paid-an I
paid;
An they wuz two bad to one good peoples
there
Like y0u an your Pa an Ma went to the Fair!"
james Whitcomb Riley.
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29
HORSES THAT HAVE WORMS

Though ravenons feeders) all the while lose
flesh. This and all diseases of the blood cured
by using DIR. READlNG,S vERMIFUGE
AND BLOOD REMEDY. i%tnever fails. ooc
a box, Sold Tor can be had1 by all druggists
and dealers. Sold by Il. b. Humphreys \ Co,
Woodstown: Rolen 4 Shoemaker. COZ Arch Stp
ana Smith, Kline, French & Co, 43i Arch st,
PhiIa. Descriptive circular sent tree 10 any
address on application to Al. v
Hatboro, Pa. lv-zo-om
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29
Only Letters.

Only l~etters-naught but letters.
Yet what stories they reveal.
Long forgotten joys and sorrows
Ger our memories once more steal.
Fond hearts plighted, hopes all blighted,
On which time hath rung his knell:
And these letters are but tombstones
To the form once loved so well.
DE Rosette.
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29
Warranted Fresh and Genuine.
Z. b.. H4mbhyeys G Co.
e
Caveats. Trade Marks and Copyrights

Obtained. and all other business in the Y. s.
Patent Offfce attended to for Moderate F6es.
onr onlcc is opposite the y. 5. Patent once,
ana we can obtain Patents In less time tnn"
those remote frem Washington.
send Model OF Drawing. We advise a. -
patentabiiity free of charge, and we MAKE y"
charge unless soe obtain Patent.
refer here TO the Postmaster, the SUPP
Money Order Div, and to officials OF the 20
fatentb flee. For ciIcIlars, advice, ler1sS
ana references To actual clients In your owh
state or Goa nty, write &c
opposite Patent ofinr. %~a.hingtnn. De
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29
GAPES
In Young chickens can positively DC ea'e'p "
using our l.iq"ori"e ior

ArEw NEARBY AGENTS, snar,,.
w,odstawn \. b. Humphreys 4 Co; SnaiP-
town, 4: !; Rogers n V~aT nro%n: Piittsgrove. IL
cot; sws sa,aseV' n. Van Lieri Yorketown.aS
e. s%ena Reeve; Pennsgrove, Diver S : sam nires 4
Co.; Saieih, =, TElmer. Butcher& Waddington.
sT IF oer Tpr Sg"i are not ,s. soi ar IN noG your
~ couprON. woodstown, \.
The Monitor. [volume] (Woodstown, N.J.) 1884-1892, 1892-01-29

HANDSOME OUTFIT mailed on receipt of
co els Agents wanted everywhere Very
liberal nav. send for Outfit and commence
work at once. One Lad Agent writes: u
make over Is. 90 every afternoon ! go out. i
do nil my homework in the morning. VIII
have a SINUS bank account by Christmas"
Address STAR PIT co. ~ Mont,
eomery st, Jersey City, Nd.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Lightning Don't Strike Indians.

In the course of his New Haven
(Conn. lecture Rev. Thos. S. Dana,
an educated Indian, made this sim
gular statement: 1.-THE Indians
never cook anything in the house.
They always cook outside, giving as
their only reason that if they cook
inside the steam will collect in their
clothing and draw the lightning.
Whether this is truth or not | do
not know, but do know this: No
Indian wigwam has been struck by
lightning since the dawn Of history,
and no Indian has been killed by
lightning for more than 100 years. "
It seems quite possible that In
dian wigwams are seldom or never
struck by lightning; but why q
whole race should be exempt wher,
ever they roam simply because their
low habitations don't attract the
forked fury is, to say the least
something remarkable.-Ex.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Wonders of the English Language

The construction of the English
language must appear most formid-
able to foreigner. One of them,
looking at picture of a number of
vessels, said: See what flock of
ships! He was told that a flock
of ships is called a feet, and that
feet Of sheep is called flock. And
it was added for his guidance in
mastering tho intricacies of our
language that "a flock Of girls is
called a bevy, a bevy of wolves is
called pack, and a pack of thieves
is called a gang, and a gang Of
angels is called a host, and host
of porpoises is called shoal, and
a shoal of buffaloes is called a herd,
and a herd of children is called a
troop, and a troop of partridges is
called covey, and a covey Of beau
ties is called a galaxy, and galaxy
of ruffians is called a horde, and a
horde Of rubbish is called heap,
and a heap of oxen is called . drove,
and drove of blackguards is called
amob, and mob Of whales is called
a school, and a school of worshipers
is called a congregation, and 9 con-
gregation of engineers is called q
corps, and q corps Of robbers is
called band, and ! band Of locusts
is called 4 swarm, and 9 swarm Of
people is called a crowd"
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Tales of q Traveller.

The Rev. John Campinus, a Swed-
ish minister who came to America
in February, 1912, and landed at
1.-THE Rocks. within the present
limits of the city of Wilmington,
DEL, was either troubled with the
nightmare or was the worst liar liar
ever produced by the Scandinavian
nation. Below | give q few SAM
pies of his able yarns
'sThere is kind of fly here which
the natives call "cucuyo," and
which in the nighttime gives so
strong light that it is sufficient
when a man is travelling to show
him the way. have often travelled
the darkest nights with no torch
but one of these flies made fast to
my cap"
Further along in his "New Swed-
en-" the Rev. John says: ''There is
here also serpent which has head
like a dog and can bite off a man g
head as clear as if it had been cut OH
with an ak. There is also serpent
which has little seeds in pocket in
his head, and by wagging the same
the rattle may be heard 100 yards.
A species Of crab which he men,
lions had "a tail an ell long and
made like a three-edged saw, with
which he saws down trees"
# Campinus were still alive Joe
Mulhatton would have to hunt an
Eother iob.-St. Louis Republic.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
A Game for Life.

A good many apocryphal tales
have been told about lives that have
hung upon the throwing of a die or.
the turning of a card, but the Pres,
colt A. T. } Courier tells one which
is vouched for as correct. Some
time since two men named Johnson
and Wilson murdered an entire
family in remote part of that ter
ritory, the circumstances of the
crime having been of the most bru-'
tai character. Both were arrested,
tried, convicted and sentenced to-
be hanged. While awaiting execu-
ton they were confined in the same
cell, where, after considerable dis
cussion, they concluded that it was
folly for both to die when one could
save the other by confessing to hav-
ing done all the bloody work him.
self. They accordingly decided to
play a game of poker to see which
should assume all the blame and
save the life of his accomplice.
Johnson, who, by the way, was
negro, proved the better player, and
won the game. Thereupon Wilson
faithfully kept his share of the
agreement, made confession" ex-
culpating his companion, and went
to the gallows with the lie in his
mouth. johnson was recently par
doned, and the story in some way
leaked out. But imagine two men
in narrow cell playing cards with
their lives for the stakes!
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
MRS. souLp IS snuBBeo.
She Longs to Get Into the Ranks o1
McAllister's Four Hundred.

It is generally supposed by the
uninitiated that the renting of a box
at the opera means an introduction
into the ranks of the 400. This is a
mistake. Jay Gould has had a box
in the parterre circle for several sea-
sons without gaining recognition
from his neighbors. To get into what
is known as society is the dearest
wish of his daughter-in-law, Mrs.
George Gould. This pretty, but by
no means elegant, young woman
was formerly Edith Kingdom, one
of the beauties of Daly's theater.
George Gould fell in love with her
and asked John Duff, then the
business manager of the house, to
introduce him. Old Duff was a
plain-spoken man. He knew that
George Gould was engaged in sow.
ing his wild oats. a
"George," he said emphatically
"if you mean straight I'll do it. But
no crooked work. Kingdom is a
good girl and won't have any
funny work about this theater."
George averred that he "meant
straight" aud in due course of time
Edith Kingdom became Mrs. Gould
She has since persevered with con
stant hope in the effort to get into
the 400. She sits in Jay Gould's
box night after night, with her dress
cut low enough to tempt an anchor
ite, and her pretty face wreathed in
seductive smiles, and Jay Goulc
smiles in a bland and philanthropit
way, and old Mrs. Kingdom smiles
and George Gould smiles; but the
rush of visitors from one loge to
another never comes to their box
and Edith Kingdom Gould and the
Wizard of Wall street remain The
most hopelessly questionable peo
pie in the opera house. Mrs. George
Gould always sits with her back t.
the stage, facing the audience, which
is very natural, as her knowledge o
music does not 60 so far as to dis
Germ the difference between mezzo
soprano voice and a snare drum
In this position, it has been plainl.
evident to the spectators for man.
weeks back that Jay Gould wa
once more about to become grand
father. During the last three per
formances Mrs. Edith Kingdom
Gould has not attended. But afte
the interesting event is over she will
return to the Metropolitan and re
sumo the smiles toward Mrs. Asto
and everybody who is anything will
an enthusiasm worthy of bette
and more hopeful cause.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Beer From q Clock.

One of the cleverest devices that
have lately come to the notice OF the
police was discovered at South
Cove house. The police felt certain
that the occupants of this house
was dealing in liquor illegally, and
they searched the place repeatedly.
but failed to find any substantial
sign of guilt. At last one man while
making q search at his house, hap.
pened to open tho door Of an inno-
cent-looking tall clock, when To-! g
faucet was revealed to bis sight
He turned the handle of the faucet
and beer flowed freely. Tearing the
clock from the wall he saw pipe!
which led him 70 q cutely covered
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Heroism and Cruelty.

An instance of heroisnl, and one
of the most atrocious acts of cruel
ty, the truth of which is youched
for by the most respectable author
ity, occurred during the Columbia
struggle for independence.
The Spanish General Morillo, the
most bloodthirsty and treacherous
tool of the Spanish King, was Gre
ated Count of Carthsgenia and Mar
quis de la Pueria for services which
rather entitle him to the bucher or
hangman. While seated in his tent,
one day, he saw young boy before
him drowned in tears. The chief
demanded of him for what purpose
he was there.
The child replied that he had
come to beg the life of his father,
then a prisoner in Morillo's camp.
"What can you do to save your
father?" asked the General.
81 can do but little, but what !
can shall be DONE"
Morillo seized the little fellows
ear, and said:
Would you suffer your ear to be
taken off to procure your fathers
life?"
"I certainly would" was the un-
daunted reply.
A soldier was accordingly called,
and ordered to cut off the ear with
single stroke of the knife.
The boy wept but did not resist
while the babarous order was ex-
ecuted.
"Would you lose your other ear
rather than fail Of your purpose?'
was the next question.
II have suffered much, but for
my father / can suffer STILL" was
the answer Of the boy.
The other ear was taken off piece
meal, without tlinching on the part
of the noble boy.
"And now go !" exclaimed Morillo
"The father of such a son must die. >
In the presence Of his agonized
and vainly suffering son the father
was executed.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Huge Stones From the Moon /.

In q catalogue of Mexican mete,
orites prepared by NJ. Antonio De!
Castillo one mass is mentioned
which exploded in the air and fell
in widely dispersed fragments, Por-
tions Of it being found in three
places at the angles of triangle
whose two longer sides were some
fifty-fve and thirty-fve miles IN
length. In one of these places two
plates Of stone were discovered lying
about $50 yards apart, which had
evidently once formed one huge
block. Measurements and estlma-
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
The King Of Dahomey at Slaughter.

The King of Dahomey continues
to butcher his prisoners and his
subjects in royal fashion. NJ. Lar,
tigue, the French traveller, gives
fearful description of the Kings
festivals. In front of his palace at
Abomey he has two great tanks to
receive the blood of his victims.
Human sacrifices occur all the year
round, but when the memory of
King Gnezo is to be celebrated the
slaughter is dreadful.
On August Sd last, according to
Lartigue, the number of killed was
over seven hundred. August 5th
was the great festival, and his Maj
esty himself took hand in the
killing. He came to the place Of
butchery in a carriage drawn by
four fine horses and driven by four
coachmen. These coachmen were
ordered to advance to the center of
the place. They understood what
that meant. They walked slowly.
Tears were rolling down their
cheeks. The King arose, walked
over to them, saber in hand, and de-
capitated them, one after the other.
The bloody work was continued
until August 29th. Some of the
blood of the victims was carried
away in buckets and thrown upon
the grave of the departed monarch.
Women were also sacrificed, and
the King was finally satisfied. He
is resting now, but he will soon
| heoin oneratiOns AGAIN.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Wonders of Longevity.

Thomas Parr, who was born in
Shropshire, England, in 1888, lived
until he killed himself from over
eating in 1886, when he had attained
the great age Of 152 years. He lived
in three centuries and titled the
soil until after the end Of his one
hundred and thirtieth year. King
Charles I. heard of the wonderful
old man and sent for him to come
and dine at the royal mansion. Parl
had always for 152 years at least
been used to the most simple fare.
At the Kings table he let his appe-
tite get away with him and ate SO
much that he died the same night.
Henry Jenkins, also an English
man, lived to be 1853 years of age.
Margaret Patten, the Scotch cook
to James VI, did not give up the
ghost until she had ground out
almost exactly 147 years.
Henry Evans, Welshman, died
in I'LL at the age of 129 years.
Jane Scrimshaw lived in London
during the reign of eight sovereigns,
from Elizabeth to Anne. Of her
1877 years, eighty of them were spent
in an aims house.
Marion Delorme, who was born
in France in 1912, and who had
romantic experiences enough to fill
a half-dozen good-sized volumes,
lived to be 134.
A most extraordinary instance of
human longevity may be found in
Smellie's PHILOSOPHY of Natural
History, where an account is given
of Peter Torten, native of Hun
gary, who died January 5, 1874, at
the advanced age Of 1856!
Letitia Cox, who died at Bybrook,
Jamaica, in 1888, claimed and pro-
duced evidence to prove that she
was 100 years old at the time of
her death.
As late as 1884 Tamah Brooks
was living at Atlanta, Ga. She was
said to be 1913 years of age and to
have given birth to several children
after passing her one hundredth
birthday.-St. Louis Republic.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Kissing at Home.

A travelling man who was also the
head of a prosperous firm promised
his newly welded wife, says the
Michigan Tradesman, that he would
give her a dollar every time he kissed
her, and in that way she could save
plenty of money, Things went on
in this way for years, and as he
made plenty of money he faithfully
kept his promise. Finally reverses
came, and the only prosperous trav.
cling man found he was virtually a
pauper. He went home to his wife
and told her all. She, however, did
not seem to feel worried, and he was
somewhat surprised when she asked
him to take a ride with her that
afternoon, but he accepted her invi-
tation. Passing a large block on a
we'll known street, she said: "That's
mine.' Soon she came to hand
some fat and said: That's mine. F"
Well, she showed him several places
with the same remark, until he be-
gan to be suspicious and inquired
"How in the deuce did you acquire
so much wealth." "Do you remem-
Der the contract you made when we
were first married 2" she said. "Yes, /"
he replied, II do" "Well, I invested
it and it and made us rich.
The travelling man hung his head
and said nothing. This was kept
up for thirty minutes, until his
wife became alarmed and she asked,
"What in the world is the matter,
and what are you thinking about?'
He said: II was thinking of how
rich we would be if l had done all
my kissing at home"
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
Didn't Mean to Insinuate.

S. w. Orr, the Missouri Pacific
attorney, once in the trial of case
made q statement that reflected on
the integrity of the opposing coun-
sci. "Do you mean to insinuate
anything?" roared the enraged at
torney. mo, l am reminded of 3
story" replied Mr.. Orr. "A lot Of
men were playing poker. One Of
the players was one-eyed man,
and it was noticed that every little
while he stole a chip. At last ono
of the other players pulled out a
pistol, laid it on the table, and said:
I don't insinuate against anybody.
and don't refer to anybody in par,
ticular, or mention any names, but
the next time a man steals chip
off this here table, | will shoot his
other eye out."-Kansas City Star.
The Ketchum keystone. [volume] (Ketchum, Idaho) 1885-1899, 1892-03-19
NOTICE
3 Application for a Permit to Cut
Timber Upon the Public Mineral
Lands..-Uusurveyed.

Notice is hereby given that the under
igned will, in compliance with the Act
ofCongress approved March 3. 1891. apply
to the Honorable Secretary of the Interior
Of the United States for a permit TO cut
timber upon tract of public mineral land
situated about six miles, in westerly
course, from the town of ketchum. Alturas
county, Idaho, u miles from sawm.li; on
the left-hand fork of what is known as Dry
suIch, commencing at stake marked No:
l At point about SO rods from mouth oil
said Dry gulch, in westerly course from
stake; thence in q southwesterly course
2s2 rods to stake marked No. 2; thence
in course about 20 degrees south OF east
erly course 200 rods to summit OF noun.
tain to stake marked $. E.; thence east OF
north about 20 degrees, distance OF 252
rods; thence 20 degrees north OF west to
point of commencement, distance OF Z5o
rods. Also, to cut timber on creek about
two miles from sawmill, in westerly
course. estimated amount of timber to be
shout 300 900 feet, and no more.
A. ADAMS.
Ketchum, August 7. 1891.