The National tribune., 1892-04-28

Il: '5's ssss: 5s,s:' d l5'ss'Gf 'ss sird. t.
5l-s - II NJ 5fTsN thinking of the past,
| GG-s2sf zTeTxes - and trying to solve the
| -+S-ESA >eSSfSSSS---sse- problems of the future,
~. shs~kas-eLs O. a newspaper was placed
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.~t~AzsS seemed to have come
over the masses ofthe Southern people. Up to
! that time they were willing to fight, and fur
| nish Of tleir means ali they could spare
for the vindication of what they deemed were
| their rights; but now that coercion was to be
used, and the Confederate Government had
said, Eou must" hundreds of thousands
said, :" We won't" and many and various sub
terluges were rcsortcd to, many of them most
laughable. 10 evade the law.
Also about this time Gen. Van Dorm declared
! what he termed marshal law" which was
| promptly sat down upon by the authorities at
| Richmond and, poor fellow, he was after
| ward murdered by Dr. Peters, who escaped
! into the Federal lines. As TO whether he was
| innocent or guilty OF what he was accused Of
| the Ercczing of DR.. Peters's domestic life-it is
not nay purpose TO discuss. But, to return to
the subterfugcs Iesored to to evade the con-
script act Van Dorn's proclamation as to
3" marshal law" strengthened their purpose to
evade it if possible.
Two conscript camps were opened IN Mis-
sissippi. one at Enterprise aud the other at
| BroCkhaven. The proclamation was pub
lisbed Tar and wide, giving those liable to the
| act SO many days to report in, and if they did
| not report in the allotted time they would be
| declared deserters and treated accordingly,
which meant death by shooting. Sad, sad,
! scenes followed; they were sad enough when
! brave men and true went 10 the front volur-
| tarily; but when pareais, husbands. brothers
| and sisters saw their loved ones torn from them
! by ruthless law, it created a feeling of horror
| almost indescribable. ana believe, and always
shall believe, that the passage of the
script act by the Confederacy did it more
| harm than good. lOu can lead horse to
| water. but you can't compel him to drink, !" and
| i know IN battle that many consc:ipts evaded
and shiIked their duties in every way possible.
Those reporting TO the camps, before they
wOa'd 20 up 10 be examined by the Surgeons,
would smoke the strongest cigars or tobacco
cbtainable and get their hearts pal pitating like
/ two hutLer-w wheels going in opposite directions
al the same time; and many were the men
who were discharged for heart disease.
heard more than one Examining Surgeon say
that they had examined men and found them
with such terribly diseased hearts that they cx-
pectc9 them to drop dead before they got out
| of the Office. II my information is correct,
many OF those parties who were discharged on
account Of diseased hearts are alive, happy and
prosperous to-day.
T.ie piles were another subterfnge. Artificial
piles were made OF chicken gizzard, and many
an Examining Surgeon had the wool pulled
over his eyes and was deceived in that way.
A certain party had stiff fingers and thumbs
| that were doubled from the second joint. lie
had a peculiar way of holding them that no
one could open them. He an Israelite and
a great trader, and his stif fingers aud thumb
| gained him bis discharge again and again. /
net hiEl after the surrender. ] noticed that
| the aforesaid fingers and thumb were very
1 supple and pliable rs well as his tongue. Re-
membering his war conaftion, simply asked
! if he bad had an operati0B performed by which
! his hand was cured. ! never shall forget tie
look he gave me and the remark he made
namely, You're very s-l-low TO catch on"
and then he showed me how lie could at will
stifen them. i am pretty stout man, and /
tried my best with both hands to open his
/ grasp bu; could not. That man now is a
great merchant in the South, and worth at
! least half million.
] wish 10 tell Of a bright young man who was
/ great actor or mimic, aud 1T the last mo-
| Eeai, just before going up to be examined af-
! ter spending many weary days and sleepless
| nights over how TO eyade-as he termed
| 1.-THE great oppression (conscript act.
| Upon the instant he conceived the idea that
saved HIM. Passing along by store in the
! country village where was located the con-
! script camp, he esped some eggs, and at the de-
! pct lie saw numerous bales OF cotton. he after
/ wards told me that soon as lie saw these two
articles il flashed into his mind as TO how be
would beat the Board of Examining Surgeons.
! Securing N rotten egg and small amount of
! cAton, just before going up to lie examined he
! retired TO a thicket, and there in the bright
monday sun, surrounded by lovely nature aud
/ natures God. he cooiiy, calmly, and ioliber-
1 ately- and with extreme caution and cunning
1 afCrelhOught. broke that rotten egg, and turn
/ ing lis head downward. the right ear was
filled with portion of its contents and So
cuTely corked mp with cotton. The left car was
treated IN the same manner. and then he took
bis place in the long line of trembling detected
couscrpts 10 await his turn.
la the course Of time his name was called,
and in one Lao@cat he was in the presence of
| the asDiters OF his fate. His name, age.
color Of his eyes, and q general description Of
his person was taken, aud the place of his birth,
residence and residence OF his parents. so if
I mamma tried TO shield him the authorities
/ would know just where to find him. Then he
was placed under the standard and his hight
taken and duly recorded, as though lac were a
horse; was made 10 step OH the scales and
weighed, though he were beef or pork for
market instead Of food for powder. Then
came forth the Chief Examining Surgeon,
pounded him al! over, placed his ear 10 his
heart, felt OF bis muscles and he cntthrough
the same ordeal as many negro did when he
was being purchased by Simon Legree.
" Well, says the Great M0gul, The Surgeon,
young man, wouldn't you make pretty good
soldier?"
Then that young man put on that peculiar
idiot!c LOOK, superior 10 any professional that
have ever seen posing as an idiot, and he
drawlod out: j. recizing / would"
Says the Surgeon: Is there anything the
matter with you at Bll?"
Then came from the young man a peculiar
snccZe and shifting at the nose, as he again
| drawled out: " Not much, though Eve go .
mighty bad risiu' in my ears, and sometimes
they run mighty bad. specially arier i We had
! q cold"
Then for the first time the Surgeon dis
covered the cotton in his ears, aud curtly and
sharply lie told MIN to stand up by the side o
him and commanded him as though he were 4
galley slave 10 take the cotton out. And he did
take il out, and it sounded almost as though Il
WAS a cork extracted from a soda bottle. (biore
like Aunt Betsy Trotwood as she extracted tho
cotton from her ear the night David Copper
field was born.)
e That Surgeon got a Whit of that aforesaid
decomposed egg, and throwing mp his hands il
s holy horror turning deathly pale, catching hi
! breath by short and convusive easps he fel
] back, not in good order, but actually tumblet
] back chairs, tables ETC., being scattered Il
4 right aud left flank on the limo nf his retraat