The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1892-04-06

1nere il notnlng IKE q grudge I0i
filling a mans mind TO the exclusion
Of everything else.
The modern girl often longs for such
a Boaz Ruth had.
The old channels Of rivers are
changed by all sorts Of dam Innovations.
The world is fall Of men who never
forget promise that is made TO them.
The little boy picked himself out Of
the puddle where his rude playmates
had thrown him. He wiped the mud
from his velvet trousers, his silk stock
ings and his lace collar, and straight
ened out his long. golden curls as we'll
as their bediaggled condition would
permit ~This," he said bitterly, lis
what comes Of being mammals little
pet"
Smlthkins Hello. Doc! What are
you doing? The Doctor-Trying 10
kill time. Smithkins-Why don't you
prescribe for it?
Il have such an lndulgent husband"
said little Mrs. Doll. "Yes so George
says" responded Mrs Spiteful. Some
times indulges too much, doesn't he ?"
Hired Boy Con a farm)-Kln 20
fshin' thus afternoon? Farmer-No,
but be a good boy and work hard m
mebbe next week you kin 90 to fune-
raj. Hired BOy-Kin / 20 to you'n ?
The Elephant Walks Around: "Did
you enjoy the circus johnny "Very
much. | had a ride on a big leather
animal with a snake on his nose"
The man who has never had a cray
on portrait Of himself made by an anna
teur artist probably does not know what
it IS to have his pride fully humbled.
Robbie" said the visitor kindly,
''haye you any little brothers and sis
ters !" NO." replied wee Robbie SOL
emnly, "I'm all the children we've go" "
APromlnent Parsonage: Jawkins
Who is that man yonder who goes along
with his nose in the air? Hogg-He 5
u mighty important parsonage. Ills
picture and biography are in all the
papers. Jawklns-What has he done?
Hogg-Ile's the man who was cured Of
catarrh.
Earning His Reward: Tommy
Mother, | want the rest Of the apple.
Mrs. Bingo-But / promised you only
half Of it if you would take the pill.
Tommy know 1t. But | took two.
De Ilass Under the circumstances
don't know that it was exactly the
right thing for me to make a speech |;
but still don't think my conduct was
unprecedented. Balak-That prece-
dent was established in the time Of
Balaam.
'My theory about Hamlet" said Ba-
conius, mysteriOusly, rs that he was q
printer" "And on what do you base
this theory~ asked Criticus. "On
that line in which he says, Either
subdue the. devil or throw him out
Soporlfc: WoOI-What do YOU 20
to church for? Van Pelt-To set an
example to my children. wool-Are
they troubled with insomnia?
A Natural Inquiry: Wagg-What
are you doing now? WoOden-Oh,
I'm living by brain work. Wagg-ln-
deed? Whose?
"What sort Of q newspaper plant
have you got out here ?" asked the
Eastern man Of the wild Western edi-
tor. Il have been using a Colts A.,
replied the editor modestly, "but con-
sidering the difficulties arising out of
the late campaign | have about con-
cluded to get Winchester.
The cheerful giver-the man with
the valueless opinion.
Once Wilkes asked an elector 10 vote
for him. mo, replied the man warm
", I'D rather vote for the DEVIL
@Yes," responded Wilkes, "but in this
case your friend isn't a candidate"
"Jones, did you ever hear the Song
Of the Shirt ?" mo, (hic) Billings, /
never did. Fact is (hic) / didn't know
q shirt could (hlc) shing."
Reminded: Smart Youth Ito rustic
old party on opposite side Of street
car)-You seem to be looking at me
pretty close, Uncle. Do remind you
Of somebody you used to know? Rus
tic Old Party-Yes. You remind me
OF an aunt of mine in Pennsylvania |
Only she's got leetle more beard than |
you've got.
One Of DIR. Howard Crosby's charac-
teristic puns was his translation of an |
vino veritas," which he angllcized as |
brandy peaches"
After a man passes 40, the greatest
hero in the world 10 him is the man
who became famous after 80.
When a man discovers his neighbors |
devoid Of virtues never possessed by |
himself he is shocked.
Heard in the Night: "Mamma,
please give me q drink of water? /
am 80 thirsty?" eff you don't turn
over and 90 to sleep TN get up and
spank youl" (Another pause.) "Mam-
ma, won't you please gimme drink
when you get up to spank me y