Rock Island daily Argus. (Rock Island, Ill.) 1886-1893, 1892-09-26
he PLAYED WITH HIM.

ace hotel discussing the presidential cam
paign with Colonel Highlands, who has
just returned from a trip to Chicago, when
a mule whacker who had come in with the
wagon train Saturday morning, and was
half drunk and aching for row, came
along the avenue Deceived by his hon
or's humble demeanor and Quakerish ap-
pearance the whacker stopped and pulled
his nose. AS the awful cyclone SCOTS over
the wide prairie-as the fiery thunderbolt
dashes itself against the tall cottonwood
as the waters of bursted reservoir rush
madly down the ravine to wreck and de-
stroy whatever lies in their path, his
honor dropped Cleveland and Harrison and
picked up the insulter. He mauled him.
He pounded him. He pulverized him.
He played with him. He left him total
wreck on the sands OF the street. The
man isn't dead yet. The doctors say that
he may linger along for months or even
get well, but he will be so changed that
even his own mother won't know him.
His eyes will stare into vacancy, his under
jaw drop down, and his countenance will
wear the look of one choking to death on a
piece of beefsteak and seeing ghost at
the same time. The only remembrance
he will ever have OF the affair will be
hazy suspicion that he happened along
just a volcano belched forth and
changed the entire face OF the country for
a thousand miles around.
LOOK FOR THE N 1.-TWO weeks previ-
Gus to the expiration Of your subscription
you will find blue pencil TX" marked on
the margin of your paper. Two weeks
after your subscription has expired and
nothing is heard from the "N' you will
very likely hear from us. We shall ride
up on our mule and demand to know why
you haven't renewed It's n habit we fell
into during the first year of editorial life,
4 Ill - IzG,~ I'll, =.
never bulldoze for advertising or subscrip-
tions, but when an advertiser or subscriber
attempts to drop out Of sight we want to
know his reasons. We want to know
wherein we have not pleased and satisfied.
We shall start out next week to look up
ten or twelve expired subscribers and may
be out Of town couple Of days. Two OF
them have sent in def and may have to
be enfiladed out OF an earthwork, while
three others are prepared to start for the
mountains and may have to be run down.
STRAIGHT BUSINESS. annual dead
head pass over the =. and ID. stage line
from here to the railroad and return ex-
pired three weeks ago, and Colonel Baxter
has not seen fit to renew it. If the colonel
does not send US a new pass, good for one
year and do it within a week, we shall
open on his old ramshackle coaches and
skinny horses in a way to malN his heart
palpltate- One reason why we selected
journalism instead OF law was on account
of the deadhead passes attached to the for
mer profession. Some editors are little
tender on this point, but we do not belong
to that class. We know our rights, sancti-
fed by long established custom, and we
are bound to have them. Like most other
newspapers, THE KICKER is continually
putting and praising and lying to the pub
lie for the benefit Of stage lines, railroads
and other enterprises, and we are not I'M
reasonable in expecting free passes II
Colonel BAXTER
Later-We stop the press to announce
that the colonel has forwarded the afore
said pass, and next week we shall have m
article Mandatory Of this speedy, convenient
and comfortable stage line, which cannot
be TOO literally patronized by our fellow
citizens.