davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

The best Salve in the world for cuts,
bruises, sores, ulcers, salt rheum, fever
sores, letter, chapped hands, chilblains
corns, and all skin eruptions, and posi-
lively cures piles, or no pay required. 1t
is guaranteed to give perfect satisfaction,
or money refunded. Price rs cents Der
box. For sale alto. M. Oreamer's.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

tell you that man Hobson is man Of
culture, said barley. He makes his steno.
grapher put r. S. V. P. down at the bot
tom OF all the letters he sends out with
hog and lard quotations.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
Marked for Identification.

Mistress-What have you marked tina
"T. M" on all your pies for. Norah2
Norah-Sure, ma'am, that's to tell tn
mince pies from tn apple pies. "T. NJ
on the mince pies is tbs mince," and "T
NJ" on tn apple pies is "'tan't mince"-
so kin tell 'em, ma'am, widout cutting
'em.-Boston Budget.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

Little Dot-What church does your
papa belong to?
Little Dick-The Baptist, l guess. He
always takes his fishin' pole along.
Street & Smiths Good News.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

Gwendoline-He loves me. for my worth
alone.
Iphigenia-I have no doubt Of it. He
found out what you are worth from my
brother Tom.-New York Weekly.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
The Bearing of 1t.


Miss G. Ossip-What can be the mean.
ing of the lavish purchases of precious
stones Mrs. Newrich is makingi Her hus,
band is on his deathbedl
Mrs Sharpe-That's III All the estate
except her clothing and jewels goes to his
children. Jewellers Weekly.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
Feminine Sweetness.

What lovely complexion she has
Yes. What pity that she has to spend
80 much OF her time keeping it up.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

Ayers Ague Cure is the most popular
antidote for malaria. All who are exposed
to the dangers of miasmatic regions should
try it. Always ready for use, and, if taken
according to directions, warranted sure
cure for all malarial disorders.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

Mr.. Suberb-Did you get the lawn
mower and cut that grass this morning,
as l told you?
Little son-N-o, was sick this mornin'.
thort | was goin' to die, was 80 weak
an this afternoon forgot it.
What have you been doing all the after.
noon?
PlayiG' tug o war.-Street & Smith
Good News,
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

Aunty-Doy you think this cake is nice :?
Little niece (from Boston)-Yes | easily
recognize the fact that the proportion OF
the ingredients are exact, to a n'cety.
That is why it is good.-Street 4 Smiths
Good News.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
Liked pOliteness.

Husband-Why do you buy such lot
of trash every time you go out2
Wife-Because the clerks are so polite.
They don't act bit like you do about it.
New York Weekly.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
A Long Game.

what was the longest tennis game on
record? Do you know"
"I'll give it up"
go and read your Bible and you will
find that Jacob served seven years for
Rachel. "-EXchange
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
Hard and Easy Lives.

Little girl-My papa has to get up awful
early, 80 as 10 get to the office and see If
his clerks is there attendin' to business.
Little boy-My papa don't have to.
He's one Of the clerks. New York Weekly,
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

/ Marian-Which would you rather be
independently rich or happily married ?
Lillian-Independently rich, for then
should get happily married.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
Settled Hut Not Married.

Father My son, you ought to be mar
ried and settled by this time.
Adult son-Well, I'm not married, but
l proposed to Miss Flirtie last night and
she settled me.-New York Weekly.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
HYGIENE COnveyances.

Doctor-You must stop using horse cars
in going to and from your business. Take
the grip cara
Patient-Why, Doctor! What difference
does it make?
Doctor-The walking will do you good.
Puck
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

Mrs. Witherby--How long did Mr.
Bangle stopthe,night that 1 wasn't home
Witherby-Until half-past 10.
Mrs Observation-Disclosures 10! Why
didn't he stay longer?
Witherby-Because | held four aces.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

His linen coat he dons to-day,
Likewise bis linen vest,
And to the country takes his way
To get rest.
Two weeks hence to the town he HES,
Denuded OF his pelf,
And two days on his bed he lies
To rest himself.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
Ofthe Salt. Salty.

Miss De Beverly-Isn't Mr.. Portheim
an admirable yachtsman?
Miss Il Trop Isn't he though never
saw anything so becoming as that new
yachting suit.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

Act on a new principle-regulating the
liver, stomach and bowels through the
nerves. A new discovery. DR.. Miles
Pills speedily cure biliousness, bad taste,
torpid Liver, piles, constipation. I'm
equalled for men, women, children.
Smallest, mildest, surestl 80 doses, rs cts.
Samples Free at A. @. Ireland's.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

First Juryman-We can't convict the
prisoner OF bigamy.
Second-Why not?
First-His having wife made his Sec
ond marriage null and void. Hence he
has but one wife, and as l understand
bigamY it is having two.-New York Sun.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

Think so?

This is going to be lively Caucus to.
night.
Think so?
l do. If you want to see disorder wait
till it comes to order.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26

The annual monthly values will show the
distribution of temperature through the
year.
Santa Fe daily New Mexican. [volume] (Santa Fe, N.M.) 1885-1897, 1892-07-26
ATTRACTIONS HISTORIC AND MODERN.

Mountains OF Mineral Fruitful
The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1892-09-29
Heavy ThOuhths.

Solomon may have been the wisest man that
ever lived but it strikes me that Adam has the
best claim to originality.
Since the entertainment several of the boys
have been heard hummng, Beautiful Bellies, -
Fairy like Beles.''
Isn't the devil continually urging men to prey?
Don't it make black-guard of a colored man
to appoint him as a policeman?
Did you notice how bright and cheerful the
chapel was the other evening? 1t was due to
those handsome mirrors, (excuse my mistake) 1
should have said, handsome lOOking-lasses, who
entertained the boys.
1 overheard the funny man remark that
Judging by the applause given the ladies the boys
were not a-verse to the entertainment but that
the entertainment was several whole poems to
the boys. Funny man is not dead yet, but is
awfully sick.) RIM.
The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1892-09-29
Infection in Paper Money.

The possibility of infection being conveyed to a
large number of persons by means of paper mon
ey has often been suggested, and an examination
of the notes of the Bank of Spain current in Cuba
which has recently been published by Mrs. Acos-
ia and ROssi in the DrOnica MedicO- Quirurgico
de la Habana shows that this form of currency
is indeed liable to contain septic germs. The
notes chosen for their experiments were some
that had been in use for good while, and were
such as represented values of few pence only.
1t was estimated that two notes, weighing alto
gether about Is grains, contained more than 49,
600 germs of various kinds. Cultures were made
in broth, gelatine and sugar, and these were
elected into the peritOneal cavity of rats and
guinea pigs, most of whom died within "a hours
The Lance.
The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1892-09-29

Boys, have compassion on us. We visit the
tailoring establishment regularly to find out about
the first grade suits, but last Tuesday we came
near being mObbed by the head tailor and his
crew for our seeming intrusion. They are MAX
ing at present Observation-Disclosures, and
Observation-Disclosures.
Many years ago one of the boys became pos
sessed of fifty dollars, and in order to keep the
money he tied string to the roll and suspended
it down the air shaft, or ventater, in his CELL
The string parted, and up to date the money it is
claimed, has never been found. Now Capt
Cayou is seriously thinking of establishing a
dredging company to scoop up the cash. He has
already purchased his diving suit
Chapter I. Our foreman had grandfather
Chapter II. Our fOreman's grandfather had
sagaciOus dog. Chapter III. A kit of TOOLS
owned by aforesaid fOremans grandfather was
lying in his house, far away. Chapter w. Grand
father says, Il want hammer Chapter "
SagacOus dog runs to the house. far away. rips
open the canvass kit, snatches hammer and de-
livers it to his master. Chapter vi. The death
scene. Slow curtain.
There is some mystery connected with that
hunting expedition in which Guard Forester
and Supt. HanlOn are the prominent figures
The formers retirement into the bowels of the
earth, where an excavation is going on and the
latter's absence attending to outside matters, is
clean proof that they are feeling abashed over
something. We have had to depend, therefore,
upon the reliable information gathered by our
sporting editor, whom we have had sworn before
notary public before daring to make public the
count given of the mighty slaughter. Here are
the figures: 115 Chickens, 81 Ducks, and Cow
(paid for). But the moose hunt was were the
knowledge of our sportsmen was brought into
play. Preceded by their two faithful Indian
guides, they slowly meandered through the
dense African jungle of Faribault county. The
"buck fever d." was rushing through their veins,
and the excitement which always attends the
chase was marked feature in their handsome
faces. One of the guides with uplifted hand sig
nailed to the hunters that they were near their
meat. Observation-Disclosures Other-in-law the
second guide, pointed to dark object reclining
on the banks of the river. Pale face must
fire.. he said. The two reports of the guns were
heard as one, and with the bound of antelOpes
they sprang upon their prey to seize it, Horrors!
a Cow. Explanation ash-Sorrow, and ! ! q?
The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1892-09-29
CellulOideS.
BY SHORN POET.
HUMMIN' AN HUMMIN'.


"Oh, bee, give us honey!" two small maidens
And the bee it kept hummn' and hummin!
" On our roses and clover all day you have fed
Still, the bee it kept hummin' and hummin'!
1--WE are Edna and FlOSSie. just six years old,
You come help yourself, and we do not scOld;
You hum and sip here, and you hum and sip
there
Please, bee. give some honey to FlOssie and me?''
"YOu are two Jumps of honey yOurselves!" said
And away it flew hummin' an hummin'!
HASTE NOT.
Once wandered a boy in LIES turmoil and hustle,
With get a hump on yourself, now; get down and
hustle;
Sort of an air and demeanor he wore.
Like a trafficking sign, breathing business ga
lore.
On the calm peaceful scenes of his boyhood
Wends broken down man; he can hustle no
He's thoroughly bumped out, both behind and
before.
This warning he shouts, as the rushing throng
fills:
Dear hustlers, go slower: it's The Pace that
IT STRUCK HARD.
81 say, Ted" said Rol, Cad! but I'm dying
for some tobacco, haven't had any for three days
yesterday, to-day and tomorrow Eyes;
but" said Ted, Tomorrow hasn't come round
YETI
Nor has the tobacco come round yet" said
ROl. Biff! biff! thud!!!
And all that afternoon, the head waiter
humm'd in soft refrain,
"Oh, he's in the hOspIt1 now
Joe: Dick, can you tell me why it is that col
Ored officers will not be engaged in this institu-
ton?
Dick: No; is there anything prohibiting it?
Joe: Yes; the rules and decipline say that the
cOnvicts shall not be bldck-gudrded
Dick: All!
And he kept on peeling potatoes.
The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1892-09-29
Come to Stay.

"What advice would you give to a
young Englishman who had come to
this country with the determination not
to return to England until he had made
his fOrtune?"
ITO take out naturalization papers.
Puck.
The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1892-09-29
Tempus Fugit.

Mr.. Morrison Essex: That new girl
gone, too?
Mrs. Essex: Yes.
Mr.. Essex: What time did she go?
Mrs. Essex: don't know-she took
my watch with her'-Puck.
The prison mirror. [volume] (Stillwater, Minn.) 1887-1894, 1892-09-29
Dame Fortune Smiled.

Lambkin: Congratulate me, old fell
low. I'm in great luck. L went to the
races yesterday
Sharp: And won
Lambkin: And only lost five dollars
Puck
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

The democrts have discovered that
the republicans have raised a quarter
of a million campaign fund without
going outside of the presidential and
vice presidential nominees and the
members OF the cabinet. This is more
than the democrats put up four years
ago In the hope of electing the then
fat incumbent of the white house.
The democrat Paul Pry is off his base.
That quarter of a million is raised as
a premium for democratic discovery
of that party's position on the tariff.
The republican campaign fund is to
be S. 10000 to be appropriated by
congress after the Worlds fair appro.
priatlon is settled, and Holman is
bottled up and sent in a refrigerator
to Indiana
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06
E Opticians.
There is No Excuse Whatever.

Every large land owner in this city
commenced with small investment and
the same opportunity is open to you to-
day. Buy two or more of those fine lots
in LONG LAKE ADDITION, good soil and a
beautiful location. blocks from Beacon
Hill car line and 6 blocks from West End
car line; the price only $50 each, with
your own time and terms to pay for them.
How does $3.50 per month suit you? Buy
now or never kick because you have to
pay rent. Buy one for your children.
Drop me a postal and will show you the
lots. No taxes to pay until 1894. w. s.
HADLEY, agent, Room Smith block.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

THERE is no doubt that the Hogg.
ties are straining the traces to the ut
most, but 1t does not follow that they
are engineering for split on the part
of the Clark men. The democracy of
Texas is at times inoculated with
stupidity and at other times it has it
the natural way, but they are not so
stupid as to consciously make their
own split in the face of the third par
ty possibility.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

SOUTHWEST Texas has had little
respite from the heat and drouth.
Copious showers have fallen in many
places. In some sections the rains
have been the heaviest in seven or
eight years. Very few points have
been left wholly without some
rain, and the indications are favora BILE
for more. The drouth stricken re-
gion toward the mouth of the Rio
Grande has been remembered this
time. and there has been great re-
joicing at the gracious showers that
have visited that thirsty land. That
these may be the precursors of more
abundant rains, clothing the arid
fields with verdure and affording
man and beast relief from the suffer-
ing and restitution of the past two
years is the general wish of every
philanthropist. No one knows what
those people have endured with q
heroism that has not given to the
world any adequate idea of either the
depth or the extent of the drOuth, the
past two or three years. in which their
su distance has been consumed and
life itself made burden. 1t will be-
months under the most favorable con-
ditions before the farmers of this
region Will be able to reap the fruits
of present sowing and in the interim
they are depending on the good off,
ces of their more fortunate fellow
countrymen.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06
Special to Printers.
For Sale,

TOt oCtIS'
One Rev. Campbell Book and
News Press, good condition,
speed, 1000 to p 200 per hour,
will print col. quarto .......SI,45o
One Babcock Standard, almost
new, will print 5 col. quarto,
26x4o, speed, 1900 to 1900
per hour, one of the best drum
cylinders in the market 400
One large Drum Cylinder Gran
ston Press, brand new, and ex-
Cellent machine. 500
Also one of the latest improved
Brown Folding Machines, bran
new, with cutter aud paster,
to be sold with cylinder press 80. Gas
One 4-horse Steam Engine and
6horse boiler, new. 1855
One Pony Cylinder, bran new,
size of bed I9x2I, speed $500
per nour ................. $50
One Pearl Jobber, 7xII............. so
One 4-horse Otto Gas Engine. ..... $50
One-half horse power Hand
wheel ......... ............... 40
One Tuerke Water Moter, horse. go. 20
For terms and particulars address
JOHNSON BROS. P'T'G Co.,
or, T. B. JOHNSON,
Manager Light, San Antonio, Texas.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

THAT KoIb vote is calling out some
queer comments on the part of demo-
cratic journals. There will be a
change in the opinions when the full
returns are received and it is seen
how nearly Jones came to being left.
That talk Of fifty thousand majority
is all CANNON. Divide that figure by
fOur
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06
NOTICE

To all persons holding claims against
the San Antonio & Arkansas Pass
Railway Company:
All persons holding claims against
the San Antonio & Arkansas Pass
Railway Company, or the receivers
thereof, unpaid, are hereby notified
to file the same with me, and to fur
nish the necessary proof to establish
the same, on or before the 3rd day of
October next. No claim will be re-
ceived or heard alter that date.
]. r. FLEMING,
6 % If Master-in-Ch ancery,
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

KoIB did not carry Alabama as he
anticipated, but the democrats did
not have any such walk over as the
first report of the returns indicated.
KOIb talks of contrasting the election
on.hehslf of the peoples party that
nomin ated him, but the vote is hard
~ close enough to Justify that.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

"THE time is come for democrats to
bury the tomahawk," remarks the
Waco Day. The Day is little pre-
mature. The time for Texas demo-
Gratis to bury the Ratchet is ten days
hence, and they will do the burying
in each others skulls, unless all signs
of royal row are brought to nought.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

WACO GLOBE promises that there
will he the lordliest row in Houston
that was ever seen IN Texas If the
Clark crowd do not receive fair treat
ment in material as we'll as inmate.
rial things. OF this there is no rea-
sonable doubt in the minds of any
one conversant with the democratic
situation, and familiar with the
peculisrittes of the happy family of
the state democracy in convention.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06
NOM Try This

1t will cost you nothing and will surely
do you good, If you have Cough, Cold. or
any trouble with Throat, Chest or Lungs.
DR.. Kings New Discovery for Consump-
ton, Coughs and Colds is guaranteed to
give relief, or money will be paid back.
the thing and under it's use had speedy
and perfect recovery. Try a sample bottle
at our expense and learn Tor yourself just
how good thing it is. Trial bottles free
at Adolph DreisS, and DreiSs, Thompson
& Co, Large size SOC and S10O. 627 3
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

DENVER is making the effort OF her
life to entertain the conclave of the
COMMANDERS of the Knights Tenn.
plar of the United States, and what
Denver undertakes to do in style is
done up brown.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

WILL the democracy OF Bexar
county fare any better at the hands
of the Houston conven ton than they
have at the hands of the conven tons
already held at Lsmpssss and
Austin? This is the living conun-
drum of the present, over the solution
of which the state democracy are
nightly divided.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

WILL the good democrats of ILL.,
nois be satisfied with the record of
the democratic congress in the mat
ter of aid for the Worlds fair?
Ifnot will they be likely to turn that
state out of the republican column
and place it in the list of democratic
ones? Well, hardly.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

THE Clarkites are getting restless
over the indications that the creden-
tails committee at Hou ston may get
in some monkey work for Hogg, and
due notice is given by Dallas that
there will be no crookedness tolerated
without hearing from the Trinity. 1t
will be mixed pickles at the best.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

THE republicans of the state give
thanks to this democratic congress.
not on account of any benifit to the
nation from their legislation, but be-
cause of the aid they have given to
the epublicans in demonstrating the
folly of depending on democratic
government for public measures.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

MIR. j. A. Lander, prominent citizen
of Clarksburg, Mo, and widely known in
that state, says of Chamberlain's Collie,
Cholera and Diarrhoea remedy: Il have
seen its good results and can recommend
it," For. sale by +. Kalteyer & Son,
Bowling & Flood, A. DreisS II Schuc-
hardt, r. COIN & Co., J. T. Harrison and
Kalteyer x Schuchard.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06
FOR SALE OR TRADE.

1000 acres Ere grazing and farming
land within 90 miles of San Antonio will
trade for city lots or will sell for cash and
part time. This land is near rail road
and well watered. Owners object in SELL
ing is having other business and is unable
to attend the ranch. Call early and Sc
cure bargain from,
JOHN T. HAMBLEToN & Co.
4-19-tf No 4, East Commerce street,
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

CONGRESS has adjourned. Those po-
lItical fences are in sad need OF repair.
The country will excuse you, and the
republicans give thanks for the i'm
pediments that you have placed in the
way of a democratic victory this fall.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06

IF the predictions of the democracy
OF New York are fulfilled in the cleo.
ton in that state it will go for Harri-
son by $4,000, but the republicans are
not claiming that and will be salts
fed with a clean 10000. That is the
respectable republican majority for
the empire state.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06
TO CORRESPONDENTS.

All communications for this paper
should be accompanied by the name OF the
author, not necessary for publication, but
as evidence of good faith on the part OF
the writer. Write on one side Of the pa
per, in a plain hand. Anonymous COM
munications will not be noticed. The
LIGHT will not be responsible for the
statements of it's correspondents.
San Antonio daily light. [volume] (San Antonio, Tex.) 1886-1907, 1892-08-06
S3,75O WILL BUY

with bath, stable, carriage house, chicken
house, wood house, etc. Hydrant water
large lot, with fine shade trees and SHRUB
berry. New, neat and clean, about four
brooks from Military plaza. Will rent
easily at $4,000 month.
JNo. T. HAMILTON & Co.