The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1892-07-27

cSoNAiilB III tic dililllL lou mean,
suppose" answered the financial edi-
tor, 6ercely, that he ought not 10 have
that brass band around his neck" "No,
] don't" rejoined the exchange editor,
waving his shears de6antly II mean
that | can hear his pants" Chicago
Tribune.
lrate Father-I never gave my faith
er lmpudence when | was a boy. Son
Maybe your father didn't need it.
Life.
Smiles: Even the unexpected doesn't
happen in Philadelphia. Best recipe
for catching q husband-Don't try.
Birds never quarrel over a difference Of
a pinion.
An eccentric old gentleman placed
in a field on his estate a board with the
fol owing generous offer painted there
on: Il will give this field to any man
who is contented." 1t was not long
before he had an applicant. swell, my
man, You are a contented fellow 2"
ayes, sir; very" "Then why do you
want my feld."
Lord Duferin delivered an address
before the Greek class of the McGill
University a year or two ago, about
which a reporter wrote: ''His lordship
spoke to the class in the purest ancient
Greek, without mispronOuncing a word
or making the slightest grammatical
solecism." "Good heavens % remark
ed Sir Hector Langevin to the late Sir
John A. Macdonald, show did the re-
porter know that p 81 told him." was
the conservative statesman's answer.
"But you don't know Greek" "True,
but | know a little about politics. p
ArgOnaut.
Stranger-What do you value your
white cow at? Farmer Furrow-She
amt worth over So Taxing COWS
this year? Stranger-I am not the
assessor. lam an Official Of the Quick
Time Railroad. Your COW was killed
this morning. Here's the $40. Good
day.-New York Weekly.
Where the Trouble Lay: "What!
You do not speak? Why, last spring
you seemed to be the typical two souls
with but a single thought "Yes,
that was the trouble. We both wanted
to marry rich.r-lndianapolis Journal.
"Dawkins looks very pale and anx-
iOus to day." "He Is worried he is
to have a very painful operation per-
formed tonight" whats that|
ale is to have a porous plaster remoy-
ed from his back Epoch.
Caught anything. bub ?" said the
man TO the lad who was fishing. ''No,
sir; but Pm goin' to ketch something
"Iow soon ?" "Soon as | git home to
mother. Washington Star.
A man should use himself
to think Of those things only
about which if one should sud-
denly ask, What hast thou IN thy
thought? with perfect openness thou
mightest Immediately answer, This or
That; so that from thy words it should
be plain that everything in thee is SIM
pie and benevolent, and such as BELTS
a social animal and one that cares not
for thoughts about pleasure or sensual
enjoyments at all, or any rivalry or en-
Wy and suspicion, or anything else for
which thou wouldst blush If thou
shouldst say that thou hadst it in thy
mind.-The Emperor Marcus Aurel-
lus.
Rebuked by a Feathered BostOnian:
Prospective Purchaser What a very
thoughtful-looking parrot. Polly want
q cracker? The Parrot (late Of Bos-
ton)-I am aware, my dear madam,
that there exists an almost universal
but erroneous belief that all parrots
manifest q prediction for crackers.
Thus hypothesis would be amusing were
it not for the intimation it affords of
the pathetic paucity of dietetic knowl-
edge upon the part Of the masses. May
| awsk if you are aware that there is
more nutriment and inspiration in a
single plate of beans than in three-score
and ten crackers? A thorough appre-
ciation Of Browning will never follow q
regimen of crackers. But what is the
matter, may l awsk? You manifest |
considerable perturbation.-Llfe.
The ideal resort would be a place
where you had to sleep under blankets |
In July and didn't have to sleep under
blankets in January. Buffalo Express.
Professor-You seem to be very dull.
When Alexander the Great was your
age he had already conquered the world.
Student-Well, you see he had Aristo-
lie for teacher. If he had had you it
would have been very different.
Every right action and true thought
,ets the seal Of its beauty on person
md face; every wrong action and foul
thought its seal of distortion and the
Yarious aspects of humanity might be
cad as plainly as q printed history
we're it not that the impressions are so
complex that it must always in some
,ases (and in the present state Of our
in all cases) be impossible
o decipher them completely. Never
heless, the face Of consistently just
md of a consistently unjust person may
always be rightly distinguished at a
glance; and if the qualities are con-
inucd by descent through a generation