River Falls journal. [volume] (River Falls, Pierce County, Wis.) 1872-2019, 1892-07-28
TALKS TO MOTHERS
wins roo-BUsY MorurK.
BY ONE OF THEM.


Copyright by Cambridge Literary Bureau and
Press. 1892
One of the most serious mistakes a
mother can make is allowing herself
to be too much occupied with other
than her mothers cares. Run away
now, mothers too busv!' is often heard,
but to one who thinks what it means,
it Is among the ''saddest words of
tongue or pen" Too busy to attend to
the one special and individual work
placed in her hands, Too busy-doing
what?
1t may be homework; it may be
cooking ard baking. and keeping the
house in beautiful order, and preparing
great varieties of appetizing food for
the comfort and happiness of those
very children. 1t may be sewing. max
ing their clothes, and ornamenting them
with stitching and trimming so that
they shall look as well as their neigh
bors. If this mother would only pause
and reflect, she might realize how
much less important are delieacies for
the stomach, and ruffies for the gown.
than food for the mind. and culture for
the manners of the eager little ques-
uoning beings, now receiving the deep
est impressions OF their lives
II resident of large city. where
Woes and needs of all sorts constantly
appeal to the tender-hearted, it may be
philanthropic work that occupies her.
She may have been drawn by the bait
IL
sdbtle temptation, and she who has
yielded to it viii probably think she is
doing the Lord work" and may even
be pulled up with an idea of her IN.
selfShness. Nothing will shock her
more than to be told that she is entire
ly wrong. If she is working for one of
the many charitable institutions that
I'll our understanding the labor and
the lives of thousands of women to run
them-she doubtless spends half her
time attending to some of the numer-
Gus details of the business, and crowds
into the other half her social and home
duties, leaving everything possible to
be done by servants, and being of
course, too busy" for ''mothering'' her
babies.
III pam SlElpptu OI It's
glamours, she neglects her own most
sacred duty to attend to the work which
plainly is not hers TO do. This may
sound severe; but is it not true? Not
to mention the criminal and the
vicious, does she not give TO the inn
provident, who have let themselves be-
come burden on society, the thought
and time imperatively needed for work
with the opening minds of her own
children? Thought and time which
confidently assert are not hers to give,
for the simple reason that she is al
ready provided with task requiring
all the wisdom and all the energy she
has To give.
II may be that the too busy"
mother is engrossed in art, or in some
other work. II this is necessary to her
support, her children are to be pitied;
but if it is for her own pleasure. or to
make herself a name, it is a great mis-
take. ! do not say that these ends are
in themselves unworthy. and we have
happily outlived the day Of belief that
a woman's only duty is self-sacrifice-
Again, the too busy" may be in pur-
suit of culture. A conspicuous example
of this sort was a woman noted far and
wide for her brilliant intellectual at
tainments; studies and writing filed
her days. Her only child was a beauti-
full boy who very early in life learned
the sad lesson that mother was always
too busy to participate IN his joys and
SORROWS. He was trained by his nurse
til big enough to run about and tyran-
nize over her, when he took up the So
ciety of his mothers stableman. He
spent hours and months and years i'm
bibing the sentiments, the language,
the tastes of his instructor. When the
busy mother paused long enough in her
studies to reflect that her son ought to
go to school-behold he had been at
school for years. She sent him to be
taught; he ran away fsom his teachers.
She hired tutors; he bullied and drcve
them off He boldly announced his OPP
position to instructors of all sorts, and
threatened to run away from home.
Not TO follow his career step by step.
il is enough to say that he utterly re-
fused education, became a spendthrift
and a vagabond CO the lowest tastes,
and at last brought his mother in sor-
row to her grave.
The mother who is too busy" may
be over fond of society, and for the
fieeting pleasures of social success may
throw away the deepest and purest
happiness life can possibly give her.
leaving the delight. no less than the
duties, of motherhood, TO a hired
servant. Society in moderation is of
great value to every mother. not only
as a needed change from home cares,
to keep her bright and in touch with
the active world about her, but as
school of manners for her children, and
a proper place to introduce them when
grown.
Perhaps the busy mother-alas that
I should have to say it's devoted"
10 fancy work. and spends the hours
which might go to mental growth for
herself or her children, in embroidery,
or in making a crazy quilt" (crazy
woman's quilt would seem a letter
name for it, Now fancy work is
harmless, perhaps even useful. and
very little adds a graceful and pretty
touch to home, but as mania it is
both to the perpetrator
who thus deliberately chooses to stunt
her own intellectual growth, and to
those who depend upon her for theirs.
How often do we see woman who has
mo time to read" but plenty in which
to make the thousand and one things
that cram her house.
To such a mother little elbows on
her knees are an interruption, little
lips disturb her stitches, and little eyes
soon learn to look to others than
mother for help, advice and love-o the
pity of it!
"a IT'S not by guilt the onward sweep
OF truth and right o Lord we stay;
IT'S by our folIles that so long
We hold the earth from Heaven away"
OLIVE THoRNE MILLER
stub Ends of Thought.