davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
JOKELETS FROM JUDGE.

His Mother-Winthrop rockingham, I
told you that should punish you If you went in
bathing again to-day. and now you must take the
consequences.
Winthrop-yery well. mother; 1 recognize that
must accept the inevitable, but won't you kindly
allow me to get out of this bathing suit and into
nv corduroys before the execution begins2
Daughter-You know, father, they are
go,ug to have fair at the church next week, and
thought would like to get something for it.
Father (handing her a check)-Certainly, my
daughter. In the cause of charity 1 am always
liberal. What were you going to get?
Notwithstanding in the way OF new gown,
TIE eel to ne'er be skinned,
The fish to ne'er be caught
My hope of Joy has thinned
To feel with them this thought,
That tits the greatest bliss
The greatest woe to miss
He (after an elopement from boarding.
schooD-You led me to infer that you would in d.
nert hundred thousand dollars.
She-No, didn't L said my father was worth
that much.
He-welI. but you never said a word about hsv-
ing II brothers and sisters.
Shell didn't suppose you wanted to marry tho
whole family
In truth she was a pretty lass
Who gazed into the looking-glass.
She murmured, as she gazed again,
Pm sure was not made in vaini''
And echo answered, ''Maiden-valnr'
Reuben-Hello, Phil what yer goin' to
do wild dat old drain-pipe?
Phil-Big snap. I'm sellin' to de Decorative Art I
Society fer umbreller-stands. I've stole all de pipe
in Households, y. Y.
"What do your club letters, B. s., stand .
for?''
''You won't tell, viii youY''
''Oh, no."
Then why should I11
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
THE CHINESE RIOTS.

The late news from Foochow, China,
indicates that the lady missionaries there
have mainly to thank themselves for the
prosecutions they suffered. Ch ristianity
and Western civilization are doubtless glo-
rious things, but it should be understood
that they are not generally so regarded in
the Celestial Empire. In giving permis-
sion to missionaries to do what they can to
enlighten the Mongol race, the Chinese
Government is really granting privilege
which costs it great deal of trouble from
the risk of disturbances among the ignor-
ant, prejudiced and superstitious populace
to which it gives rise
AS a return for favors received it is due
from the missionaries to act in accordance
with the wishes of the established authori-
ties. And especially so when those
wishes are expressed on behalf of the
safety of the missionaries themselves To
refuse assistance and disregard warnings
honestly rendered is to fly in the face of
Providence. And such carelessness fire.
quently brings Its punishment with it as it
did on this occasion. To unnecessarily
endanger human life is criminal at all
times And to court martyrdom and pro-
woke riot is uncivilized and can only tend
to retard the cause Of truth.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
D1sCoMFoRTs ON RAILROADS.

1t is at this time of the year above all
others that one regrets the shortsighted-
ness of the railroad companies in failing
to rid the travelling public of an easily
remediable grievance. One has to choose
between partial suffocation with whole
sale stewing or the risk of being blinded
and the certainty of becoming filthy.
This, of course, refers mainly to the gen.
eral public who make use of the ordinary
cars, and in much less degree to the
comparatively exclusive few who patron
ize the more expensive Pullman vehicles.
Walk into any car and look for clean
seat after train has been in motion for
few miles, and you will fail to find rest
ing place that is not copiously sprinkled
with cinders ranging from the impalpable
in size to the dimensions of a good sized
pea. Dust one of the seats off with
newspaper or any other available imple-
ment, and take your place. Sit with the
window down and you will smother while
inconvenienced by the burden of the
draughts of fresh air coming through your
neighbor's open easement. Throw up the
sash and your eyes are in serious danger,
your face is rapidly flecked, and your
clothes are covered with dirt, while the
cinerary matter finds its way into the
innermost recesses of your anatomy unless
you take exceeding and most inconvenient
care to enshroud yourself in kerchiefs and
dust coat
Yet almost all of this could be pre-
vented by the adoption of some proper
arrestive apparatus in the smoke-stack,
or at least greatly mitigated by fixing
proper screens alongside the windows
But, while railroad companies are run on
the principle that they must yield the ut
most profits, and while the value of
human life is disregarded to great ex-
tent, it is hardly to be expected that any
will be paid to a matter of such
mere detail as the comfort and cleanli-
ness of passengers.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
THE SCHOOL YEARS END.

Yesterday was the last day of the public
school year, and to-day the pupils and
teachers begin their two months vacation.
That they will all enjoy it and make good
use of their time in recreation should 90
without saying. What difference it does
make to the public whether school keeps
or notI What change there is about all
homes where there are youngsters, and
what an altered character the streets, and
even the public cars, have at the times
around the usual hours of commencing
and leaving the days work in the class
room.
The public school system is one of the
finest features of American national life,
and cannot be made too much Of Public
school teachers have a tremendous re-
sponsibility in their opportunities
for forming the character of those
In whose hands the future
of this country lies. The children, too,
have an immense weight on their
shoulders which has to be borne by their
guardians until such time as they shall be
able to appreciate for themselves the
duties as well as the rights of American
citizenship
Weary mothers are apt to find the boys
and girls somewhat of trial when the
time hangs heavily on their hands and the
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
TO BURY RAILROAD WIRES.

It is understood that ever since the loss
suffered in the blizzard of 1885 the Penn
sylvania Railroad Company has been con-
sidering the advisability of burying the
electric wires. The result of the seven
years thought on the matter is that a
committee is said to be now investigating
the best method to adopt for putting this
immense network under ground.
The action of this enormous and pro-
gressive corporation in the direction indi-
Gated will be closely watched by the
general public. If it take the initiative
in burying its wires, other corporations
will rapidly follow suit. Not only will
the cities be rid of their unsightIy and
dangerous overhead encumbrances, but
the wires will practically disappear from
every landscape. And besides the con-
siderations of estheticism and public
safety, which make this revolution de-
sired, there is the immense advantage
which will accrue to the public when the
prompt delivery of its messages is rem
dered independent of wind and weather.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
CENSUS DISCLOSURES.

Some explorer in the Willis of census
statistics has made an alarming discovery.
1t is nothing more nor less than threat
ened shortage in the supply of women.
We have heretofore been accustomed to
believe that while women were scarce
and much sought after in the West they
were superabundant in the East. But the
present census tells different tale; and,
worse than all, the deficiency strikes us
near home Not only are there SS1, 900
more males than females in the United
States, but in Pennsylvania, the State
pledged to home industries, the same pre-
pOnderance is shown to the extent of IA
600 more men than women.
The news that the visible supply of
women is decreasing is exceedingly dis
turbing. Everyone will concede the me-
cessity of woman and endorse the declara-
ton Of her traditional eulogist that "as a
mother she is unsurpassed; as wet nurse
she is without equal among men," If this
prime necessity for the nurture of future
generations is diminishing at the rate of
one and one-half per cent for each decade
which proportionate decrease. is dis
closed by comparing the census of Penn
sylvania in 1890 and 1sSO-the prospect is
gloomy for posterity.
Of course the disclosure will make us
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
A COMMON EXPERIENCE.

A case recently presented in the Phila-
delphia courts embodied common but
futile wish of urban mankind A proper
ty-holder went into court through his at
torney and requested an injunction against
the erection of third telegraph pole in
front of his house. Two poles already
planted there he managed to endure, but
the third was the large-sized straw which
broke the back of the property holders
forbearance, and he wanted the court to
stop it. Mttle satisfaction was obtained
from the court, however, the Judge re-
marking that the property-owner did not
own the sidewalk, and if the erection of
the pole was authorized by Councils there
was nothing to do but stand it. The
complainant's attorney left the court with
the Parthian remark that his client did
not want ga hedge of poles'' in front of
his property.
In these words was expressed the COM
mon lack of desire among property-owners
for that adornment And the same fate
seems to attend that negative wish. Prop
erty-owners in other cities as we'll as Phil
adelphia are finding out that they do not
own the sidewalks, while it seems to be
the practical conclusion that the telegraph
companies do own them. So the hedge of
poles goes up.
In addition to this demonstration as to
the title in sidewalks, this case gives
further suggestion that the triumphantly
announced work of putting the electric
wires under ground does not progress
more effectively in Philadelphia than else
where
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
PITrsBURG. SATURDAY, JUNE a5. 1892.
TWELVE PAGES
THE ISSUE OF THE HOUR.

In a letter from an English firm of
manufacturers to Mr.. Henry w. Hartman,
the iron and steel maker of Beaver Falls
and Eilwood, very striking statement is
made. The Englishmen say:
The American branch of the works will
not be built this season. They will await the
result of your elections, as we'll as several
other proposed American factories If the
Democrats elect the President we will keep
all these good things at home.
No American could more graphically
describe the issue on which the national
campaign will be fought than does this
Off-hand paragraph in private business
letter 1t cannot be charged that this
flat-fGoted expression of intention was
brought forth by any political machine or
written for any political purpose. 1t is a
simple business proposition, simply stated.
1t means that if the Democratic party
triumphs, English manufacturers will
have their work done at home at such
prices for labor as are current in the
United Kingdom.
To England, Cleveland is the prophet
of English prosperity. His victory is an
English victory, his theories are English
theories, his benefit is English benefit.
Stop for moment and consider what this
means, not to Pittsburg, not to PennsyI-
vania alone, but to every hand that wields
the implements for the fashioning of
metals in this countryl
With Republican success comes the
transplanting of the industrial establish
mentS of other lands to these shores, here
TO assume new conditions, to meet new re-
quirementS, to pay new standard of hire.
With Democratic doctrines paramount,
this all changes, and we not only lose such
accessions but most of what we had before
as well.
Free trade is blunder, Democratic
blunder, blunder which figures in the
American calendar as crime.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
A BRAVE WOMAN H0N0RRD,
Her Services in Life-Saving Recognized by
the Government

Her Services in Life-Saving Recognized by
tho Government.
WASHINGTON, June Ex-senator Allen, of
the State OF Washington, has received from
the Secretary of the Treasury, for trans
mission to q woman in his State, a magnif.
cent gold medal, engraved I'm circle
around the face with the words: I'm testi-
mony of heroic deeds in saving life from the
perils of the sea-" and on the face of the
shield with the words. in very small char
acters: ITO Mrs. Martha White, for heroic
deeds in rescuing three men from drown
ing" On the reverse side Of the medal are
the words: United States of America, act
of Congress, June 20, 1874.
The story of the remarkable act that has
called forth this recognition from the Gov
ernment is set out in q letter from the Sec
retary of the Treasury which accompanies
the medal, in which. after reviewing the
facts of the rescue of three ship-wrecked
sailors of the ship Ferndale, he saws: "Such
by strong men, and are then justly con-
woman they attain tho highest degree of
heroism and are entitled to a recommenda-
tiOn of extraordinary examination. 1t Is said
that you have been accustomed to frequent
the beach during dangerous weather, in
quest OF such errands OF mercy as the mis-
fortunes of the sea might lay in your power,
"a signal evidence of those high moral
qualities, unfailing courage, and q spirit OF
generous se,fsacrif1ce without which no
person, man or woman, could have achieved
your heroic work"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
PROTECTION SPREADING
How the Sentiment Has Been Strengthened
Out In Indiana.

indianapolis Journal.I
Marcus r. Sulzer, of Madison, a member Of
the Republican State Committee, was at the
Denison last evening, on his way home from
Gas City, where he has large real estate in
terests. Said Mr.. Sulzer to Journal re-
porter: "You people outside of the gas belt
in Indiana can scarcely appreciate the
Strengthening of the protection sentiment
that is going on in the gas belt. It is con-
sidered little short of treason there to talk
free trade, and Democratic doctrine receives
no encouragement The cause of it is the
influx of manufacturing interests that bids
fair to substitute the factory whistle for
the dinner horn. At Gas City everybody
talks tin and everybody has tin statistics at
his tongues end. Go up there and you viii,
learn that 80 per cent of the tin plate of the
world is made in Wales, and that rs per cent
of it is consumed in the United States.
Four hundred and forty-five tin factories
there employ 163, 900 men. As one of the re-
suits of the Mckinley bill % tin mills will be
moved from Wales to Gas City. These
mills will employ 1000 men, and their en-
ployment means an addition to the popu.a-
tion of Gas City of 1900 people. The same
conditions, to q greater or less extent, OBJ
tain in every part OF the gas belt. The
people have got the idea into their heads
that this is the result of the Mckinley bill,
and it is going to be difficult to dislodge that
notion. Put It down that we will gain
several thousand votes in the gas belt The
drift there is in our direction"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
TAMMANY'S WATERLOO.

THE Tammany braves marched mp with
Hill and then marched down again.-N Y.
He' aid
OUR Tammany friends may be thankful
that they got out of that Chicago Wigwam
alive.-N T. Telegram.
THE Tammany tiger was choked to death
mt Chicago. but there will be q resurrection
I'm November-OhtoS State Journal
The Gothamites and their "satraps and
dependents who make up Tammany went
to Chicago to gather, wool, but have come
home shorn.-Brooktyn Standard linton.
TAMMANY may undertake TO control the
action of future Democratic National Con-
ventions, but 1t is u rather safe assumption
that she Will be slow hereafter to undertake
open dictation in that observation-disclosures
phid Ledger.
WELL, Tammany has been turned down.
Her protests have been hurled back into her
teeth and her candidate has been relent-
lessly siaug htered. She has been told that
she has neither influence nor standing in
the Democratic party.-Phtadetphf Inquirer.
For years the most powerful and most
feared political organization in the Demo
cratic party, its dominant spirit always con-
trolling the destinies OF men and principles,
1t is to-day a broken reed and a powerless
factor in national politics.-Grnnd Rapids
HeTQid
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
JOE JEFFERSON ON GROVER.
why He Is Very Well Pleased With Cleve-
lands Nomination.

why He Is Very Well Pleased With Cleve-
lands Nomination.
BUZzARD's BAY, MASS, June A.-Joseph
Jefferson, the actor, expressed deep personal
interest in the nomination of his "boon fish.
erman," as he is pleased to call Mr.. Cleve-
land. "The details of the proceedings at
Chicago are an enigma to me-" he said "but
I understand the situation sufficiently to say
that know the convention has made wise
selection. Great men are apt to be good
f1sherIhen. You can judge a mans charac-
teristfcs better when you fish with him
than under almost any other conditions. Mr..
Cleveland is an eminent philosopher and
profound thinker. He is q Sherman, conse-
quently of high order, as eminent philoso-
pliers generally are. He fishes with q rod in
q scientific manner, and possesses the art of
cajoling bass to his hook with almost abso-
lutte certainty.
"Mr. Cleveland, Mr.. Glider. Of the Century
Magazine, my son and myself own lake and
three islands at Marsh Pee on Cape Cod We
the name of the capes, which very fire.
Quently terminate IN it; for instance. Ma
nomit, Cotonit, and Naquussit. The islands
names are Getonit, Notinit, and Comeffit.
Cleveland do in the vicinity of our camping
grounds at Marsh Pee would sound so in
credible that do not wish to peril my repu-
tation as a reliable relator of piscatorial an
tribe, Mr.. Cleveland observed that wise reti-
cence that indicates an interest in the sport
-complacency, and peace and harmony
with all mankind.
speaking OF the last subject do not re-
member that l ever heard our distinguished
friend make an unkind allusion to an op-
ponent. He has been sorely tried, no doubt
us the newspaper reading public are aware.
MIR. Cleveland rarely mentions political SUBJ
jects among his fishing friends, except of q
very general nature. Last evening. while
at his home conversing with Mr.. Cleveland
and his guest, Governor Russell, 1 drew
upon my limited political knowledge and
ventured to ask some questions regarding
the gathering at Chicago. They are abso-
lutely certain to nominate you,' said.
"Mr. Cleveland laughingly replied: 1T is
never best to be too certain in politics. A
convention may sometimes be compared to
a petit jury and act exactly as they see f1t
and oItentines exactly opposite to the
wishes of interested COUNSEL
several times when / have expressed
friendly solicitude. after reading some
newspaper disquisition on the probability
OF the Democratic nomination, Mr.. Cleve-
land would answer seriously:
i allow myself to form no anticipation"
I really believe that he is the coolest man in
America, and, If were to add the greatest
man this country has ever known, 1 would
only express my feelings. Therefore, when
/ burned fireworks tonight let off my py-
rotechnics with quite as much enthusiasm
as any other American displayed to-day"
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25

prize women more highly than ever, if
that is possible. We have understo cd for
some time that certain types of women,
such as prime donne, ladies of fashion,
domestic help and frst-class heads OF
families were scarce and naturally costly.
The same appraisement must now be ex-
tended to female clerks, workers and
school teachers. What can more thor
oughly recognize pater familias to the bill
for the summer outfit or the fall campaign
than the knowledge that in the females of
his family he is the possessor of what is
growing rare and consequently more costly
with each decade.
These are the mitigations of the discovery,
and yet they are wholly insufficient when
we contemplate the difficulties that must
arise if the softer sex should continue to
diminish in this proportion. The only
real consolation is that which has already
served several ambitious municipalities,
namely, to take refuge in the unreliable ty
of the last census
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
A FOOLISH PROPOSITION,

A remarkably radical and unconstitution-
alsuggestion is made by city cotemporary
to provide the President with power to
legislate in accordance with the platform
adopted at his nomination by the party
electing him. The strange proposition is
made as follows:
"The rule of the people will be incom-
plete until political parties are compelled
to add to their platforms plank like this:
As guarantee of the fulfillment of these.
pledges, we demand that Congress shall
clothe the President with authority to in
troduce and manage in both Houses of
Congress all measures of legislation
called for by this declaration of party
principles.
Such action on the part of Congress is
altogether beyond the power of that body
as defined by the Constitution. If by any
chance it could be given the necessary
power by amendments to the Constitution,
the result would be disastrously revolu-
tionary. The balance between the Execu-
tive and the legislative authorities-the
maintenance of which was the leading
thought of the trainers of the Constitu-
tion-would be entirely abolished. And
nothing could have so ill an effect on
American institutions as the disturbance
of this balance
The evils of patronage are great, and
the trading of official appointments for
support in accomplishing desired legisla-
tion is to be heartily condemned But, to
provide the President with the combined
powers of British sovereign and Prime
Minister for term of years, with no
check whatever upon his actions, one
would have imagined was far too foolish
proposition to be dreamed of, If it had
not actually appeared in cold print The
wisdom of the fathers who established the
framework of Americas democracy was
great, but all their foresight was none too
much to provide against the follies of their
degenerate descendants. Having sug-
gested that the President shall hold the
powers of legislation in addition to his
executive functions, our neighbor may as
well complete the matter and vest in him
the authority of the Judiciary and save the
expense OF the Supreme Court.
Pittsburg dispatch. [volume] (Pittsburg [Pa.]) 1880-1923, 1892-06-25
GEORGE ALFRED TOWNSEND.

Eugene Fields Pen Picture of the Noted
Correspondent of Tho Dispatch.
Chicago News.l
George Alfred Townsend-he whom you
all know as "Gath"-is an early bird, one OF
those unhappy people Of whom Mark Twain
has said that they get up in the middle of
the night to eat q meal. He is a man OF
SPLENDID physique and of regular habits.
He makes practice of getting through his
work by noon every day. and therefore he
has to start in upon 1t by O'Clock. So he
rises at $50 o'clock, and by 7 O'CLOCK is ready
for Dreakfast-no coffee and toast affair, but
such square meal as is qualified to stay by
its possessor through six hours of hard
work. He does little writing. Pacing the
floor of his room he dictates to a stenog-
rapher: this practice gives to his work that
conversational, half-familiar character that
is n conspicuous charm thereof
Mr.. Townsend has a larger personal ac-
quaintance than anv five other men in the
country. His fund of information upon
every conceivable subject is simply enor-
nous, for he is essentially an inquirer and
an observer; his memory is wonderfully
broad and retentive. In many respects, he
is as remarkable q man as we ever have met
with.