The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-05-24
THE ARIZONA KICKER.
Editorial Etchings From The Pen of
The Great Modern Editor.
~[Copyrieht, 1892, by Chas. B. Lewis.l

LSOPS A1~hIF 1Cv", W OAoo' L. AO"4S'I
It's NO UsE.-A theatrical company
travelling under the title of THE Mad
ison Square Uncle Toms Cabin Com
pany," opened here Friday evening to
a crowded house. AS the play pulled
along it was discovered that there was
no Uncle Tom, no dogs, no Legree.
Five poor actors were trying to carry
all the parts, and the only scenery
used was a representation of Roman
ruins were ruined forever, and the &C
tors got such a bouncing about that
two of them are still hiding in the un-
derbrush along the river.
This is another proof that this town
can't be longer imposed on 10 theatre
cal matters. We want al good as they
have in New York or nothing. There
must be nothing left out II there are
ten parts we want to see ten actors
walking around the stage, If there's
a mule in the play then show him up,
and he's got to % alive and kicking.
We are an up and up people. We pay
cash and want the value Of it. We ap-
preciate a good thing, and have no use
for second class materinl.
GONE HoNE.-As will oe seen by an
obituary notice published Ii ewhere in
this issue, Major Daton, n of our old
pioneers, has passed from earth away.
Whiskey killed him, though you would
never suspect it from reading the obit-
uary. He played asquare game of po-
ker, but as an offset was quarrelsome,
Incorporate and given to promis 1Uous
shooting. We can't say that we mour
his demise, or that he will gain any
thing by the change to another eli
mate. He was the first man in this
town to shoot us, and WAS about the
only one we ever fired at who didn't
drop when the gun went off. Only two
days before he was taken sick he sent
us word that he was camped on our
trail and would split our other ear with
a bullet. In the midst Of lie we are
in death.
AN UNEXPECTED PRESENTATION
day morning we received a call from
Henry NJ. jackson, Esq, of Leven-
worth, Kan, who desired to insert an
ad in the Kicker asking for informa-
ton about his brother Tom who was
known to be in the town a year ago.
In the course of conversation it
came out that his brother was other
wise known as { Nevada Ned, and we
HIS LAST RESTING PLACE.
were able to furnish information at
once. We killed the man on Apache
avenue the Sd day of last September,
and his grave is marked 'No. g." in
our cemetery. Nevada Ned" was out
for game that day, but we did not
draw on him until he had fired twice.
We took Mr.. jackson out to view his
brothers last resting place, and also
showed him the bills to prove that we
gave the departed a forty-two dollar
funeral. He expressed his gratitude
in the strongest language, and sub
scribed to the Kicker and paid a year
in advance. Mr.. jackson goes from
here to Tucson, and we cordially rec
ommend him to the people of that
town as a thorough gentle man. He
offered to refund us the forty-two dol
lars. but we couldn't accept it. We
make it a rule to pay all funeral ex-
penses out of our own pocket.
WE SHALL OF COURSE. Our contem-
porary is out with the suggestion that
the coming fourth of July be celebra-
ted in old fashioned style, and wants
to know if the governor can't be in
duced TO come here and deliver the
grafton. We don't think he can. We
think he has more sense than to enter