St. Johnsbury Caledonian. [volume] (St. Johnsbury, Vt.) 1867-1919, 1892-04-21
FOR fl1r Hnnr.
THE RUDENEss OF PARENTS.

Children suffer more pain from the
rudeness with which they are treat
ed than from being forced to do need
less things which they dislike. In
deed, positively and graciously
courteous manner toward children
is a thing so rarely seen in average
daily life, the rudeneSses which they
receive are so innumerable that it is
hard to tell where to begin in setting
forth the evil Children themselves
often bring their sharp and unexpect-
ed logic to bear on some incident IL
Illustrating the difference in this mat
ter of behavior between what is re-
uuired from them and what is shown
to them: as did little boy | knew,
whose father said Grossly to him one
morning, as he came into the break
fast, room, "Will you ever learn to
shut that door after you :" and a
few seconds later, as the child was
rather sulkily sitting down in his
chair, "And do you mean to bid any
body 'good-morning,' or not?" Il
don't think you gave me very nice
'good-morning, anyhow" replied
satirical justice aged seven. Then,
of course, he was reproved for speak
ing disrespectfully; and so, In the
space of three minutes, the beautiful
opening of the new day, for both
parents and children, was Jared and
robbed of it's fresh harmony by the
fathers thoughtless rudeness.
Was the breakfas t-room door
much more likely to be shut next
morning? No. The lesson was
pushed aside by the pain, the motive
to resolve was dulled by the antag
onism If that father had called his
son. and, putting his arm round him
(oh the blessed and magic virtue of
putting your arm round a child's
neck, had said "Good-morning, my
little man." and then, in a con-
fdential whisper in his ear, What
shall we do to make this forgetful
little boy remember not to leave that
door open, through which the cold
wind blows in on all of us ?'-can
any words measure the difference
between the first treatment and the
second, between the success of the
one and the failure of the other?
Scores of time in day a child is
y
to do or not to do certain little
things, which we ask at the hands of
older people as iavors, graciously,
and with Difference to their choice.
Would you be SO very kind as to
close that window ~ May I
trouble you for that cricket ~ "If
you would be as comfortable in this
chair as in that, l would like to
change places with you;" "Oh! ex-
cuse me, but your head is between
me and the light, could you see as
we'll if you moved a little?' Would
it hinder you too long to stop at the
store for me? would be very much
obliged to you if you would"
Pray, do not let me crowd you"
etc. In most peoples speech to chill
dren we find as synonyms for these
polite phrases: "Shut that window
down. this minute" Bring me that
cricket Il want that chair; get up.
You can sit in this" Don't you see
that you are right in my light !?
Move along" Il want you to
leave off playing, and go right down
to the store for me ~ Don't crowd
so. Cant you see that there is not
w
and so on. AS | write, feel an in
stinctive consciousness that these
sentences will come like home thrusts
to some surprised people. hope so.
That is what | want. [ am sure
that in more than half the cases
where family life is marred in peace,
and almost stripped Of beauty, by
just these little rudenesses, the
parents are utterly unconscious Of
them. The truth is, it has become
like an established custom, this diff
ferent and less courteous way of
speaking to children on small occa-
sions and minor matters. People who
are generally civil and of fair
kindliness do it habitually, not only
to their own children, but to all chill
dren. We see it in the cars, in the
stages, in stores, in Sunday-schools,
everywhere.
On the other hand, let a child ask
for anything without saying thank
you" sit still in the most comfort
able seat without offering to give it
up, or press its own preference for a
particular book, chair, or apple, to
the mountaineering of an elder, and
what an outcry we have: Such
an ill-mannered child !" "His parents
must have neglected him strangely"
Not at all; they have been steadily
telling him a great many times every
day not to do these precise things
which you dislike. But they them
selves have been all the while doing
those very things to him; and there
is no proverb which strikes a truer
balance between two things than the
old one which weighs example over
against precept.
La LIGHTER.