Eagle River review. [volume] (Eagle River, Wis.) 1890-1927, 1892-01-14
TEA-TABLE SALAD.

III CIcy always make me so i'll
'iiat can go to school the day after"
-Anekdote's Bibliothek.
N A r has not changed him
.nucn, SAID Mrs. Potts. Before we
were married he would not let me carry
the lightest bundle-and he does moi
now. He let's me lug the heavy ones -
-lndtanapolis Journal.
FARMER MEDDERGRAss "Be YOU a
iaWssyer, sir Z" BLACKSTONE with dignity
am practlcing law, sir" Medder-
grass = moving aWav) "I thonoh+
mebbe you'd got the trade learned. III
go to somebody else '-Epoch.
DREssMAKING establishments want
measures, out not men.-picayune.
The Post office Department. appears
10 oe just little two cents-ative on the
SUBJECT OF penny postage. Binghanaton
Lcatier.
First IRIsHMAS-''Pore Flanagan has
list been drowned" Second Irishman-
he g lucky bhoy. Oh always thought
he'd be hanged. Comic.
"A BEAUTIFUL New Years anthem
should be written on the Office towel
and entitled, "W ring out the old. RING
in the new. p Hoshingo,s Star.
They re now made one, who once were two
NO more till death to part
lie matched shade for her. and that
was how he won her heart.
-NelU TorE Press
IT wasn't enough Uncle Sam sbould
have trouble with his foreign relations,
but here come annoyances from some
OF his Mexican borders.- PhuodelDhio
Times.
HANKs-"1 am particular about my
razor, and [ don't want it used on a
second party" Barber-'I never took
that razor to no pahty, boss. "-NeaU
York Herald.
JUDGE FowLER-"Speak up, now !.
How did you come by those chickens ?"
'Rastus Henshaw-"Dad's les de
trouble; couldn't get by dem no how,
sab. Puck.
SEEING mouse dart across the room
she screamed murder at the top OF her
voice." II suppose that is what you
would call murder on the high Co.
Neav York Press.
''JorNNY, Johnny" said the minister,
as he met an urchln one Sunday after
noon carrying string of fish, "do those
belong to you ?" "Ye-es, sir; you see
that's what they get for chasing worms
on Sunday. "-Spare Moments.
TEACHER OF NEGRO SCHOOL (pointing to
letter X)-''What's that letter, Jonas ?"
Jonas (bashfully)-''Gues don't know.
sah." Teacher-"Oh, yes. Think a
minute" Jonas (brightening)-"Oh,
yes, sab. Da's daddy's name. "-Droke's
Magazine.
PHE11M-" Phwere wor ycz goin'
phwin Oh saw yez goin' into Casey g ?"
Dennis-''Into Casey s man, to be sure"
Phellm-"W ull, Oh wish Old sane yez;
Ord Nv had We rush tn can fer w."
Dennis-''Wull, We did see me, didn't
yer" Phelin1-''Faith, not till yoz wor
out O. sight p'-Drake's Magazine.
JAcK-"What are you going to do
New Years Eve o; Harry-"Going to
a rattle" Jack - "Where 2" Harry
"Miss Trix's. She gave her heart to
about dozen of us at Bar Harbor last
it."-Horper's BozaT.
AFTER long and exciting struggle
with Ben Butler the grippe is able to be
about again Washington Post.
II is not considered an advancement
when a boy has to come off the perch
to take "rod. - Columbus Post.
THE world is full of men SO engaged
in saying "Amen" that they fail to see
the contribution basket.-Atchison Globe.
CHOW, my little man, describe your
SYMPTOMS" 81 haven't dot,any symp-
Tins. / dot a pain. ''-Harper's Baaor
One of the highest offices in the gift Of
the government is that Of Waterman IN
the Washington Monument Uoshsng-
ton Star.
WIEN physician checks patients
malady he feels that sooner or later ne
ought to have check in return.-Boston
Courier.
One of the slowest features about the
street cars is lot OF women moving up
to make room for somebody else.-fitat-
ode1phia Times.
TIE candidate who wants the vote Of
the people never gets tired Of hearing
YOU wish him many happy returns
Baltimore 1merican.
WHEN the minister sees his congre-
cation scratching their backs, on the
edges of the pews he realizes that DUCK
wheat is the flour Of the t1ock.-Bt''9-
humton Leader.
"YEIL. your goose is cooked, ex-
claimed Bowser as he entered his parlor.
"Who has been roasting you this nme'
nv dear?" asked Mrs. BoWser anxious
ly.-New York Herald.
NtcHrNARE.-''I nevah eat mInce
pie." said Chappie. "Why not asked
Hicks. sit makes me o"ea-h VI iily aii -,
cestahs, and between r Us, they were '''A
"WHAr kind of cake was that you
wa -, be asked. cit was marble
cake y was the reply. Didn't you
NOV it?o "Not exactly; but ever
Since swallowed it, rather suspected
to- Washington star.
F.rt1EB-"Well, Tommy, how do you
+,,inll Won will like this little fellow Tor
hrotherp' Tommy Gnspectlng the
new infant somewhat doubtfuliyl-.
shave we got to keep. him, papa, or Is
ba anIv = sample Pr Chicago 1r'tafae.
rnr Boss-"Look here, Toms son;
von,ve painted that laundry sign ga
landry ou What do you mean by such
work as that?" Journeeyman- o i,le
dow how it was, udless It's because a 5o W.
cot cot, ad dawful cold id the head. tar
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