Wheeling Sunday register. [volume] (Wheeling, W. Va.) 1882-1934, 1892-01-24
ASHEVILLE ECHOES
BILL NYE KEEPS US,INFORMED As TO HOW
THINGS ARE MOVING
Ssnshr Vance Back From the Holy Land-A Few
Soeisty Items-The Great and Only Ebsg and
Other Great Men Nya Has Net
Cerwialt. ~. Dy - w W.


AsHEvULE, y. c., January "a
This has been a very gentle and balmy
winter for the native tar heller as well
Is tho Cape Cod aSthmatic and bronchial
wheezer from the frozen home OF the
abolitionist who may have been spend
ing the season here.
Tropical growths are getting along
first rate here II kept indoors, and such
subtropical vegetation as the John pine,
the jonQuil and the horSeradish are
growing in the open air.
Senator ZebulOn b. Vance has return
ed nom the Holy Land with new story
picked up in the Sea of Galilee. II is
cOrker.
senator Vance Is looking well and re-
turns 20 his senatorial labOrs with re-
pewed viEor and q travelled air which
we North Carolina people alone lack to
make Us shine.
He says that Baireuth is pronounced
ByrOit.
Senator Vance was there during the
Wagner imbrOgliO. I do not know what
An imbrOglio Is, but / think 10 was that.
He told several stories illustrative of
American humOr while at ByrOit, and
asI understood il, interSperSed between
the Wagner selections. They were not
well received.
he told an anecdote OF Ex-Governor
Hoard's, OF Wisconsin, regarding an eX-
perieuce he had while in the army.
After a forced march Of eight weeks,
durjng which the brigade did not touch
food, being anxious 20 close the war,
they camped one night at crossroads
where it was found that In an old de-
serted tobacco warehouse there were Sc
GREETED three barrels OF sparkling, home
made Dent corn Heidsick, grown on the
place,
The boys tried 20 get at it, but tho Of
fcers saw at once that there would not
be more than enough for themselves,
and so placed q guard over the liquor.
In the night the boys got into the base
ment OF the warehouse with eight clean
Washtubs and an anger, and in the
morning 10 was found that two OF the
barrels were empty and most Of the bri-
gade full.
The following night, after apollinarjs
and family prayers, it was resolved 10
try and get the other barre. In order 10
soothe that vague unrest and one thing
and another which Que feels after an
undue indulgence In spirItuOUS, viEOuS,
malt or ferusnted liquors. They did not
know that the guard mad put the third
barrel on two sawhOrseS foot above
their auger's utmost scope. All night
they bored holes iutO the nocturnal
bosom Of the ScOoting hours, all unmind-
ful that the guard slept by the barrel in
q new place on the floor.
Toward morning Governor Hoard
took the anger with a heavy heart aud
bored a new hole In the bosom OF the
night. He aid not strike what be
sought, but there was wild shrek
from above, and when the governor
pulled the anger out be found on IL the
fragment OF q gray army shirt and
birthmark. Leaving the eight new
tubes where they were, also 100000
new auger holes that had never been
used, they an went away.
Senator Vance told 10 better than
have, but when be got through the Ger
man friend of NoEuer aid:
"Um-yah. Vot kahn Of a story vas
dat9'
THAT is a humorous stoES. That is
American humOr.'
sNO, my frain; OXcOOSe me. Dot vas
not yOomar; dot vas tam lie.'