The Seattle post-intelligencer. [volume] (Seattle, Wash. Terr. [Wash.]) 1888-1914, 1892-05-22

| of the American order it seems to me, but
| now it runs largely to puns and petty lar
ceny 1t is sadder humor than ours,
| good style to adopt during lent. English
| humor with sulphur and treacie can do no
| harm, j think.
"An Englishman came over on q Gu
harder the other day, and the passengers
| put the customs officers 'on to HIM be-
| cause he seemed to have swollen up so
rapidly the day before reaching New
! York. But how do you suppose he got
| out of it? He told the officers that the
day before he landed the passengers got
him to talking on the tariff. and before he
! had an idea what he was doing he had en-
| larged upon it!
! "He turned out to be the song and dance
editor on the staff of Punch, who was COM
| ing over to America for his health, also
| for the purpose Of organizing a school of
what is called Whtechapel humor, which
| is quite popular IN England now"
| The Cincinnati geological works pos
| sesses the taiIest and nandsomest giraffe
| grandi6ora that there is in America, so
/ am told. 1t can easily eat out of a third
! story window, and belongs to Rescue
Hook and Ladder Company, No. 3, of
| Cincinnati.
The elephant was feeling very poorly
| when / saw him. His skin looked dry
| and feverish. When he walked his over
alls ratified together like tin clothes fast
ened together with wire.
| The mandrill is strange looking beast
| with brief but spirited tale. 1t has a
| blue nose, but Pushes easily if taken by
| surprise 1t then goes and burie5 Its face
| in its hands in an embarrassed way, err
| roneousiy thinking that it is secure from
| view.
1t was on board a train between Wheel
| ing and Pittsburg the other day that /
Il A-s11 L..
| refined Kentucky gentleman who was
| selling ballot boxes under the Australian
| system He said that he could also pro-
| vide voters when it was desired. He said
that nothing for years had called forth 80
| much genuine ingenuity as the Australian
ballot system, not only on the part OF
| those who wish to defeat its operations
and effects but on the part of those who
wish to make the successful ballot box
| booth, etc. so as to be the official manu-
facturers of voting furniture. He told me
| of Swiss gentleman from Tell City, Indi-
anna. who has perfected portable booth,
, ballot box, guard rail. rope and six
| chairs, all Of which told up into a
snace 81 inches thick, and the package
| does not look larger than good sized
| atlas.
This gentleman was attending church
| few weeks ago when the shrill cry of fire
! burst forth on the street OF the village.
| The pastor had been unusually interesting
| in his talk and unusually strong in his
| vigorous attack, especially upon gam
| bling. drinking and the dissertation of the
| Lords day. Every one was greatly inter
ested, for the pastors heart was in the
i work and his burning words were listened
| to with rapt attention, for his language
| was as powerful as it could be without vio-
| lation Of clerical etiquette and the statutes
in such case made and provided.
Fire, however, had broken out in the
hotel near by, 1t seemed, and SO IN the
| midst of his eloquent and fearless battle
! against these vices he broke off suddenly
to aid in saving property. He formed
| bucket brigade. and aided by the four
| other pastors, who had also fastened to
| the scene. line of pals soon extended
from the nearest pump to the ladder rum
! ming up the side OF the building.
For hours the good man foughtth
| flames without ever pausing for breath.
| The hook and ladder company did the
| swearing while he carried water. They
pulled down ivy vines, ate hotel pie, filled
| the air with imprecations and ever and
| anon rolled up their sleeves to see If their
| muscles had grown any since they last
examined them.
Finally, seeing that-the hotel could not
| be saved, and that little cottage near il
was threatened, the pastor said: Let us
| save this little home at least. Put blankets
| on the roof and keep them wetted. Work
\
| little cot even though the hotel perish"
Finally, after hours of struggle in the
| choking smoke and heat and discourage
| ment. the flames died down and, sur
rounded by ruin and wreck, the little
house stood by itself safe aud unscathed
The pastor went In to see if everything
| still remained unframed and to receive
| the thanks of the occupants There was
| no one there, but on the table, face
down. were four unusually good hands,
| running all the way from the straight 10
the bobtail flush. while in the center of
the table stood the tempting jackpot. and
near by. on sideboard, tail receptacle
| with willow environments containing
| spirits, arranged and dramatized by gen.
| tleman named Pepper.
The cottage was what was called in that
country Speak Easy" A Speak Easy"
| is not a moral place.
The pastor put on his coat and princess
vest and went home, and as ne went some
| one heard him say: Whose Is simple, let
him turn in hither. He that reproveth
scorner getteth to himself shame, and he
that rebuketh wicked man getteth him.
! self blot"
| @4Alw