New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1892-05-01
THE JONESES, SAM AND JOE.
SOME OF THEIR LITTLE IDIosYNCRAsIES AT
HOME AND ELSEWHERE.

| little While TO wake up the people who nave not
heard him for two three years on the platform
or in the pulpit. lie may be less original than
formerly. but is not less forcible. Sam has made
Gainesville "dry' town, but some OF its young men
are not models OF solr1ety
! A youth was stroliing along Mainst., when
stranger remarked to the barber who shaving him
| There goes hard case
"slnlcks, h. ain nuthin' t'whut e ter be-" the
barber growled
| " Reformed -
! "Sorter. III err man kahn erprove N dis place e
kahn crprove nowhers. wc's got lots hgion n
dis town. Dom hyer o. nutln' ehe from mawnln'
tell night. Got de bigges' ligonst IN all-Sam
Jones. Ded Ter know c live yerl'
"Oh, yes, know sam Jones. How do yon like
HIM"
| Dom like i'm
"You surprise me. / thought he was the big man
of the town.
| "Hc's all dat N mo- bu' dom like m"
| "whyl'
| Knows i'm too we'll
| "What has he done to incur your di like ~
| "En dc fu,' place 'es money Christian. Ain
dat ernuf'"
| ale had to llvc.'
| 81 lows dat. bu e ain bngc ter lay up no fifty
thouscn dollars and buy mp all de bestes' farms en-
do state oucn whut e bcgs O. de poh sinners whuts
payln de way ter Mons Hill. OATS whut lm
sr,octin To- sam Jones's gion it high 1t does
|
agrees to take one end Of the landstick and give your
reonc the other end and lift against the whole
town Moro than that; lie offers to give S2o,Ooo
| 70 the new college If the town Will give S1o,ooo.
coIl that liberal enough for anybody. Your people
ore of mighty little account II they 90 not t''Ac
him up ,>,.,.,
torgit how e use ter drive er truck roun town en-
halter be druv home night cos e too drunk g couo
drive csef DE nabors dam forst how bou' Misses
roro sbo usetcr sem roun m borrer dcy close ter
WAR cos she ain got nIth'n' t put on NO" looh
NJ ,em ddvin, bou' town wild pony phaens en- Sch
on, cuttin' de big swell. Lord De res ain nowheS
side o. dem folks
| The stranger guessed that there was a personal
rrudce somewhere and unhesatingy invested half
dollar In the BARRIERS confidence lie Is bright
mulatto endowed with n large measure OF laznes',
and proud of himself and the conversational powers
which his tonsorial occupation mas enabled hun TO
cultivate His language Is better than that OF the
average negro.
"Dis lister spen heaps O. money
| buyin lottery tickets he said, having strapped
| his razor for the twentieth time, "'en'
dats whut KEEP IL poh no count. Sam Jones
e learnt bout IT, EN- tuk It fur tex one o de
tabernlckle preachIns. r sed mo- money was sent
way from Kyartersve ter de NewOrleans lottery
en- week den foun' Its ter all de churches In
| town en- de whole year, &c prayed fur de people
ter change all dat en- quit de lottery bznis. had
done quit long 10 dat tex preached en- Sam
Jones e hyered bouen II en- e up m sed TO dc
whole tabernicke. You people oughter be shamed er
| yosclfs bou' dls lottery bzns. Wy, yere's john
Taylor de barber, who ter buy lottery tickets
but % seed de sin whut en- II. en- quit Ike de
true rcpentancer. Amt yer shamed o. yoselfs ter
| be outdone BY Niger. er poh niger Dat
whit e sed TO de whole abnernicklc, en- II nle
me sos ain had fur sam Jones sencc'
/ roh,, rr,rIor do Dnh |
| I tor sam Jones I wash no Niger. en- was'n'
no poh Niger, ! Civ i'm ter understan'. i ain no
| Niger Z ALL ser ! right out en- tabernckle. i
wants dc white folks dis town ter understah da'
John Taylors mother she wuz er ln1un en- e
father WIZ cr sho nuf whe-man. white ez eny white
man on dis tabe rnickic.' OATS dcs whit up II
scd en- ! ain bin botherlh' wiz '"" '"''' '
knows i'm too we'll -
! yet notwithstanding this barber, no prophet was
evcr more honored IN his own country than honest
sam Jones.
s. poh- Jones the scvcn.yCarod son OF MS idt'er'
was among the score Of sinners who went mp 10 t'e
orrrors, bcnch 10 be prayed for. The good orother
ho was "leadin' the mcetn'" exhorted long ana
sOlemny. - . ~
| nMv vounc brother in the Lord" he said in con-
,son do Won feel that the spirit OF our Father mas
|doscended upon You and washed you OK all 'o"'
| ,ns washed Won whittier than the snow J.
|
almost rose from its foundations whch inc o'u IVY
Of the town lifted up his head and said;
| You bet
one OF Bob's playmates, n bright boy OF N\ years.
hoard the great revvalst preach from the text ray
| lrother pray without cea>ng." ana upon 'o'."i
home Immediately fell his knees beside his motner
bod Five minutes later he repeated the performance
In ton minutes he was knecling for the thiru uihe
which attracted his mothers attention
| .Wbv Malcolm, what In the world do you meah''
she inquired Of the young hopeful
| Mamma he replied, solemn rs a judge 'ir'
| Iones told me % pray without ceaSing. I've ao"c
,.arod ,hrco fines and I'm going pray again in a
minute
| uerc,s another one on Bob ut Is said that preach
ers bovs are worse than anybody eises Doys'' Iio
chews tobacco Il habit picked Up among ne 'I hs
mnnns of The town. and his father has iectva mn
frequently and earnestly one evening" NM oimp
NV Youthful Christian end, have you any special I
request to Of the Lord " the eXhortr smeo wv M.
having disposed 81 some SIN Ut e's"' '"'''
'V Tho yspon,e came In soft voice from the bench
and for once In hi. life Bob seemed serious WIFI" ''
| an swercd with show OF feeling
| y" Pray for and my tobacco
% loo. Jones' one OF SANS numerous brothers. mas
sted in The ministry. His lrt sermon was prcachru
in country church at Pine Log before q 'ase uUn
Of arms' t"Nsa @rS Considerable sue
ccss hut when Joe branched OH on ms own iooh mo
struck lie caused ms heaSrs carers, l" ,o xcIo,mrd
| siannInc the Bible nearly of the pulpit ne eAcHnmeu
| \ man what viii cuss a oath II strM' ,
| There was a lively shifting among 'ne Pcws anu
much cautious looking around and heiid sahhs' JUG
NV and determined 10 push his point -. l.. -
"Rretlern and sisters he rep ,atcd. wa,t U, say
,o Won that a what Will 'nss Il oa'h Al S'e"i !
What have yOu got to say - That -. a.. ,,
/ An aged cracker AT the back Oh the churcn
and fastening his gttering gray eye on joe drawed
through his nose: . -, ., ,,a,r
All | got ter say Is It's er gol dern iie!" -
discouraged that lie W>teu Oh MS ourS
two weeks before making any more bold assertions.
Lon vos met in Atlanta by Il newspaper man. who
, ,kcd him how he liked his new feld
' W" ~, ,in.tnn WAS tho r,ply IL amt u
now. though. | feel like I'd been IN the harness a
ing time. IL takes grit t. travel the rad I'm on
tmt I'm in the middle Of it-Oh, I'm bound for the
promisc, land!'
Do you make money OUT OF IL r,. -, $780,. 49,.