The Columbian. [volume] (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1910, 1892-04-22
Mr.. BELCHER'S PIES.


that housekeeping is one Of the easiest
things in the world. thought so my.
self once, but think 90 no longer, hav.
ing had sad experience in one of its de-
partments. now look upon . house.
keeper as long-suffering, patient crsa-
ture. Her work is never done simply BE-
cause It ID forever undoing itself again.
Ny wife was slowly recovering from .
long and severe illness; our girl had left
without any warning Q week before
Thanksgiving, and as we lived about
twenty miles out Of Boston. it was next
10 an impoesibility to get another. had
managed to keep things going, although
the bill Of fare was rather monotonous,
steak, toast and tea appearing moro fire.
quently than we desired. Not that we
had such . fondness for steak, but 10 %
easy to cook.
We were congratulating ourselves on
the fact that we had invited no one to
share our Thanksgiving dinner, when
the Tuesday before Thanksgiving day
my wife received note from a young
cousin in Boston. announcing that she
would spend Thursday with us, as we
had asked her so many times to visit US
whenever she got an opportunity.
She further said that she was longing
for piece of good mince pie never ex-
cept in dreams had she tasted such de-
licious mince pies as dear Martha"
made.
After reading this gushing epistle to
me, "dear Martha" said,-
@Now, Joe Belcher. what on earth am
to do? like Jenny very much, but
wish she wasn't coming this week, Of
all times. She will arrive here at ton
o'clock Thursday morning, and we can't
give her steak to eat every time she
comes to the table. However, for Thurs
days dinner you might manage to cook
turkey and some vegetables, if you
will do just as tell you; but oh, dear!
what shall do about the mince pies?
would not offer Jenny Thanksgiving
dinner without them.
why don't you buy some at the bake
shops1i suggested.
me.
"Just what MN would say, and yet
they are the first to rail at bakers trash.
Mince pies, of all pies in the world, must
be well made. and, you know, 1 have al
ways prided myself upon mine"
Although l had been so severely
snubbed, with all the bravery or conceit
of my sex came to the front once more.
"Now Martha, said cheerfully, "you
write explicit directions for making
mince pies, and will try my hand"
-
she gave me for second, then:
"Why, Joe, you make mince pies! Oh,
what fun! You know you have burnt the
steak to cinder every day, and yester-
day when you tried to make a cake to
surprise me, it looked more like square
Of yellow flannel than anything. don't
believe you ever saw pie being made.
"You forget, my dear" answered
blandly, that the first day made love
to you, you were making mud pies.
No notice was taken OF this brilliant
remark. Martha was deeply thinking,
with very downcast countenance.
"Well," with a sigh. it is the only
thing to be done. We must have mince
pies. just give me paper and pencil and
will write the directions. You get the
meat and put it on to boil and then will
help you stone the raisins but this will
be the first time made mincsmeat one
day and used it the next"
Under her directions, which were some
times difficult to follow, managed to get
the mincemeat "fairly good" as Martha
said.
1t was nearly twelve o'clock before I
laid my aching bones to rest, and dreamed
all night that somebody was fogging me,
and that was to be buried in mince-
meat did not exactly "rise with the
lark, " in fact, it was after nine next
morning when 1 awoke. How envied
the men who had nothing to do but get
up, and saunter down to breakfast and
read the papers. To have to get ones
own breakfast is anything but bliss but
when pie paste to be made stares one in
the face, it is enough to make a saint
swear.
Martha was rather low in her mind
about it.
"The paste is the worst part, she said.
81 am so afraid it won't be short, and
tough pie paste is awful"
OOu WHY baiu' thiuh tnc
hardest part is DONE.
Armed with my recipe descend ed to
the kitchen. The order and cleanliness
of that apartment needs no description.
when you hear that l had reigned su-
preme there for week. / think I can
safely say every dish and pan in the
house was full or dirty. I put on an
apron, got the paste board and roller out,
then proceeded to mix -four water, but
ter, and salt together. What could be
easier than thatf My hopes went up,
and began to whistle "Annis Rooney" l"
When it was, as / thought, all right,
put II on the board and began to roll 1t
out.
Itstuck to the board, to the rolling pin
and to my hands. What could be the
matter2 I must look at the recipe.
Where did put itf At last found 1t,
but there was nothing In it about stick
ing.