The National tribune. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1877-1917, 1892-05-12

aud Iuks was the Government nerved to the
point Of requiring its soldiery TO shoulder their
houses like the fnollusks. and thus relieve the
tuneful, accompanying mule of sore respon-
sibility.
This was an innovation whose dam was Ne
cessity, and whose sire WAS held TO be some en-
issary OF Satan, with an unearned increment of
prestige in the counsels of Halleck, General in
Chief, so-called. Versatile sc0rners promptly
scheduled its pedigree for generations up and
down. Minutest Of constructed residences for
living humanity, save, perhaps, the half-credi-
bic tub of tough Diogenes, it won a way into
our reluctant liking that vindicates its title TO
consideration among the factors of ultimate
victory.
Most portable of mundane mansions its
very littleness relieved the situation of num-
berless inielicities; specifically of servtude TO
servants whether appe-cheeked daughter of
Denmark, or saddle-colored Cantonese with
eyes cut has, and free coinage lingo not on
speaking terms with veracity. Likewise others
which relegate housekeeping to the level of
cantbariGes blister, and make the court cor
ridors ring with the battle-cry for freedom
shouted By luckless suitors, who married in
haste 10 repent at Sioux Fails.
The shelter tent of our war era was a French
device, Steeped to the hem il uuquesticned
elimination of martial economies. The force
of dire frugality could no step further go.
Woven OF white cotton spun to faseine rgidity.
imperviousneSs, its fat measurement but
squared the average soldiers stature Two of
these squares, all buttoned down before, formed
what with s8tiric mimicry was called by that
proud name which in the older day had des-
1gnated sGca pOmp of dTaped and curtained
pageantry rs almost made ambition Virtuous.
Styled "tetit" IN the sardonic nomenclature
Of cur nomadic days. il was in sober verify
wrap, cape. kirtie, ponche, which only
by connected duplication and reduplication
came within the pale OF that sonorous title. A
square OF cotton fabric. set down one side with
buttons and holes to match cut opposite-thIs
was each warriors allotment Of hsbitstion in
embryo.
Thus our legions became prolific of incipient
partnerships and enforced Qualities. The in
exorable fiat that, in all great Natures lumi-
nous immensities, dooms each hapless male 10
seek and fad his destined mate with such
rare exceptions as both earth and Heaven re-
vile, is not more pitiless than the decree that
IN each squad or squadron men must form by
twOis in more or less harmonious domesticity,
or lie unsheliered through the bowling storms
Terminates or comrades came to be the cor
porRte appellation Of these co-efiicients. and
here were deep foundations laid Of lasting
friendships. and of most deadly, deathless
hates, whereof the world holds record to this
hour
The Shelter tent had neither veranda nor
portico. The bay window that biteth like q
serpent and stinseth like cactus when the
bill comes in, was conspicuous by its non-ex-
istence. 40 futcd town-hall pillars decorated
its bl2melcss exterior: no black closets fanRed
with sharp hooks and breathing pestilent mus
tines, luTked in its dreadful depths.
Guiltiess Of tapestry, even of paper tattooed
into iscsceles trianglcs, were its wals-nay
vetoed were walls, indeed, save when in some
mad riot Of sumptnonsness, hoisted above its
normal altitude, like sliding-roof of clover
--fol fo5,, IF ho. Dc
breasted ii up, four squares TO all the gusts of
Boregs.
10 door-piate shimmered, purporting in
gothic unaecIpherabies 10 name the OCCUPANT
for no door on which faintest simmer could
be hang gr4ccd the wide frontal vacancy Who
entered here left his bon ION behind
Destitute also was the shelter tent of the
ponPous execresccnce Of chimneys and their
accessories. from the parlOr mantel, laden with
ses-shells and aconite pellets to the stove In
the guest-chambcr, yoluble IN prophecies of
sncSeless combustion as unhopeful as counting
q grass-widow with an inchoate right of dover
70 80 acres OF swamp land in a school section.
Minus likewise were the chandeliers me-
EDentoes Of much, but chicfest OF those swelter-
ing social hilarities where persPiration is un-
confined, where heels smite eorns on toes that
groan again, and where French-plate diamonds
fash on paipitating bosoms perilously exposed
10 the weather.
or otherwise. These knec-wrenching postu-
lates of civilization, a stumbling-place to the
old, and TO the young fooiishness, here inter
init their catalog Of ambuscades. Thus was
assured TO the assorted jewellers the security
that flows from being in, as it were. on the
gronnd-hoor-the peace past guessing that
arises from the certainty that contractor can
spring bill Of extras for the newell.
Cellsr!ess, as well was this abode. No damp
mess tceining with bug and lizard life, ex-
haling noxious fsme, darting fatalities Of ty-
phoic, diphthcretic or other polysyllabic form:
10 wet-walied breeding-ground of fungus: no
1eculent antelope Of perdition, that foul rep
Tile den, where asps and anacondHs Of sin are
Kissing and writhing foreyer-no cellar. ia fact.
1mperlled those who were here CHARTERED con
0enning them 10 nncanny comradeship with
original profoplasm.
No walls Of partition parceled off the shelter
tent into spaces conYentonalized to peculiar
functions. Aristocracy OF exclusion aud seciu-
SION there was none, but broad and impid
democracy Of exposure to all curiousness.
though searching rs croton oil Hence drawing
room. boudoir and Kitchen oratorv refectory
and lavatory were al in one but only in alter
nation, since the contracted area preclnded
EImultaneousness as well as latitudinariansm
area was rot Its boast. Take all the dwell
jngs Of al the spheres aud minimize each
through endless years, the shelter tent would
dllate them all Therefore for partitions there
was neither space nor need. Superfuous they
as specie basis for the Chippewa currency OF
five ponies Tor asquaw-luGicrously malapropos
as were pigs feet and ham croqneis al a rabbits
reception, or point lace and pearls al charity
bail.
NO hghtning-rod adorned its frowning ned
lment lank and fatgning reminder not alone
OF Ben Franklin, thrifty printer, and his kite
bDch as never was before ia air or tree but also
OF the glib and evanescent vendor whose mo-
nopoiy OF al destinations was only eonaled
10y his absolute prostratiOn Of all moral attri-
butes. That convoluted metallic insutiiciencv
thrust not It's aluminium barb above the crest
OF this domicile. like a reed shaken by the
wind, mute witness TO each passer of the
owners sweet credulity
Thus negatively responsive TO gupremest
need, unicttered with extraneons embellish-
ment, thus shorn Of non-essentials, the shelter
tent stood manifestly reduced to last ANALYSIS
Ci bare utility. The plRinest among ten thousand
and the one altogether unGashy. But il had
even further lack Of modern conveniences
deemed indispensable. Habitually there WIS
NO floor; Of windows glazed or glazeless it was
equally bcrelt.
Locks were forsworn and misft KEYS un-
dreamed OF. Bath. buffet, pantry. aud re-
1ngeraior were pardonably absent OF venti-
lation there WAS much, but the resounGing
cSInnafs between register and radiator the
thunder ol furnace captains, and the steam
neat shoutings were unheard. Venetian blinds