The Port Gibson reveille. [volume] (Port Gibson, Miss.) 1890-current, 1892-02-10
THINGS WISE AND OTHERWISE.

NhOootNonO Od1 iaSt iiiBiit.
Mr.. Growler (meeting his son at
p. m.) Here, John, where are you 20
ing at this time of night? On no goot
lerrand, iii warrant John-No, sir
| was going down town to look for you
| Vicarious: IrascibIe Old Gentle
man (arriving breathless at the statlor
lust a second too late)-ConfounC
and Fair Stranger (who feels th,
same but dares not express it)-0h
thank you so muchl
| In Strict Confidence: Mr.. Ana,
| confide in you? / want TO tell you
secret. Mr.. B. (suspiclously)-Whal
is it Mr.. A., looking around to see
if nybOdy is listening)EI need $500
my friend. Mr.. A.-Dont fear,
A.; will be as silent as the grave.
A Patent Dryer: Henry Ward
Beecher once suggested that the damp
ness which damages so many caruoes
Of ocean borne wheat might be obviated
by storing in the hold Of every vessel
copies Of the annual reports read a.
religious anniversaries.
A Clear Conscience: Bobby-Maw,
IS n wrong for boys TO tie tin kittles on
dogs tails +? MOther-Very wrong,
Bobby. | hope you never do such
things Bobby (fervently)-No indeed,
nav; all | DO Is TO hold the dog.
A country minister in Scotland once
paused in his sermon and asked one of
his flock who was quite deaf, "Are We
hearln', mOnY" "Oh, aye was the re-
ply; "Im hearin, but to vera little
purpose"
IL Is upon the whole complimentary
10 say that a man is not such fool as
he looks; but this form of praise is
seldom relished by the receiver Of it.
A medical lecturer says: aGirls in
feeble health should take q tramp
through the fields or woods every day.
But suppose q tramp should object 10
be taken through the woods or fields
every day by girls IN feeble health p
BlnghamptOn Republican.
II was a member Of the Chicago Lit
erary Aggregation. who. on being ask
ed if he could read Greek, mOdestIy re-
piled, Il don't know; / never tried"
In the Elevator: Stout Gentleman
How often do you get a new rope for
this elevator? Boy-Once every four
mOnce; and if we pulls thu safe to-day,
we'll glt a new one to-morrer.
Tram Robber (to victim who takes
81 out of the 800 pile which he hands
over)-HellO, here, what do you mean
by pocketing them four dollars /? Vic
tim CindignantlyeMine uendt, would
you refuse man two Der sendt dis
goundt on a sdrictly cash dransagtion
like DIS ?
A Lasting Wrong: Fred (bitterly)
That woman did me the greatest
wrong woman can do TO man-gave me
a solemn promise Of marriage and =.
Borus-I see; and then broke 1t.
Fred-No, hang it She kept it and
made me keep It too.
A Guilty Conscience: Borus-Hel-
10, Bradley! Hard at work, I see.
I've just heard q good joke on you. 1t
was about that Bradley nervous
lyl-Sh h! Ny wife is in the back
Office.
Miss Simper Sally, you drink too
much coffee. When I was a little girl |
they used to tell me that if / kept on !
drinking coffee it would make me fool
ish. Sally (aged l0l-Well, then, why |
didn't you stop, Miss Simper?
Two Different Ideals: Visitor
Why do you cry so, Tommy? Tommy
cause mamma won't let me wear
my hair long. Visitor-O, you want
10 look fike sweet little Lord Fauntle-
roy, don't you dear? Tommy with
immense scorn)-No; / want 10 look
ike Buffalo Bill.
A Gloomy Outlook: Sister Moan
Mr. Pcundtexk | am 80 sorry
'ou are are going to leave us. Rev.
Mr.. Poundext t-You should not grieve,
lear sister. No doubt the Lord viii
end you q better servant to fill my
lace. Sister MI fear not OF eur
asst four pastors each one has been
worse than his predecessor.
Natures Grand Cathedral: ~Shall
'ou 90 to church this morningT asked
friend. NO" said Mr. Freethink,
mphatically; Il shall worship in the
rand cathedral Of Nature" An hour
Ater MIR. Freethink was seated at 8
ickety table under q dusty tree, hs-
ening to the music of q wheezy hand
ryan, and drinking something that
Ooked like beer.
A boy in Maine tried 30 Kill The
ilred man by putting Paris green in
he Jug of cider. The man drained the
ug with "hahw Of satisfaction, re-
marking that cider seemed 10 be get
ing back some Of the old-hshioned
trength.
Hotel Clerk-Your bundle has come
part, sir. May ! ask what that queer
hing is2 Guest-It Is 3 patent fire.
scape which | always carry, so as TO
ct myself down from the window in
ase Of FIRE. Clerk (thOughtfulIy)-T
ee. Our terms for guests with FIRE