The morning news., 1892-02-21
WIDE-A w AXE "BAB"
TRINKS THE THEATRICAL BENE-
FIT BUSINESS OvERDONE.

Fascinating Siege Queens as Charity
Merchants - Napoleon Bonaparte
Adorers and Imitators-The Hand
writing Crsze-Cardinsl Gibbons,
henry Irving, Terry, Langtry, VII.
son Barrett, Jane Hading and Je-
rome <. Jerome as Letter Writers.
True Happiness Defined.
NEW YORK, Feb. 2O.-Of the giving Of
many benefits there seems to be no end.
People who do and people who don't de.
serve them get them, and tired actors and
actresses have to pretend to be jolly, and
don't dare to refuse to appear Rt them, be-
cause they'll be written up as hard-hearted
if they do. OF course, there are benefits given
for good causes. but. on my honor, l fail to
sac how, when men have squandered the
GOOD things of this life; when, having
danced, the paying time comes, it should be
expected that the theatrical profession
should Immediately step forward and con-
tribute their work-their hard work-to
help the one, perhaps. who never helped
them, and who doesn't deserve it. 1t is
good in them, it is kind in them, but it has
been done to the ground. Everybody who
has ever had anything TO do with theatri-
Gals seems to think, when he gets a little
down in the world, that 1t is all right for
him to have benefit.
BEGGING ACTORS.
The actors clubs do not hesitate to take
charity in that form, and think it is no
more than they ought to have. When the
business man fails, all the people who deal
in stockings and linen don't have a special
sale for his benefit. IL were to grow law
and take to drink tomorrow the newspa.
pers wouldn't sell a special edition to keep
me iu good brandy in my old age, and If
you we're to fail in the milk business. or il
your race horses declined to be first at the
post, neither the milkmen nor the
bookmakers would have special days
dedicated to you. There is too much Of this
benefit business entirely. The actor. while
be is in his prime. makes money; if he
doesn't save any, that his lookout il be
chooses to squander it on clothes, beautiful
belongings and general Publications, he has
no right to hope that wheu he is old and
broken to bits his brothers in art are going
10 earn it for HIM. The actor, more than
any other worker. is, when be amounts to
anything, very we'll paid, and more than
any other he ought to be able to save
money. When be doesn't, have very little
sympathy for him.
1t is rather funny that you don't hear of
beaefits being given to the women on the
stage Is it because they are naturally
more economical, or because they look into
the future and realize that the day may
come when they will no longer be beautiful
and attractive, and yet when bread and
butter must be theirs! I picked up a
read Of a benefit to be given to
fat, mediocre actor, whose chief
claim on the public seems to
be that be has mixed himself up
in a good many scandals. Now, why
should he have benefit! He has lately
married, has pretty wife, and one who 1
think Is quite able to support him, but he
is to be given a benefit. @, it is nonsense!
If they would give benefit for the cleaning
of the streets Of New York. it would be to
some purpose. For my own part, l am Just
a bit diSgusted with the benefit business all
around
LOVELY DRAMATIC RETAILERS.
Somebody wrote me letter and asked me
VINO would sell various things at the Actors
Fund Fair. | don't know, but imagine
that Louis Harrison will retail chestnuts.
that Agnes Booth will sell pink lemonade,
that Sadie Martnot will preside over the
roses, that Lewis will sell horns full of cam
dies, that John Drew will dish out ice
cream, that Marie Tempest will rule the
French dolls, that Georgia Cayvan will
vend pocket handkerchiefs, that Kelcey
will have mems furnishing store, that
Estelle Clayton will sell slippers those of
Cinderella, they'd fit her. but they would
never fit you, that Lotta will preside
over the bloom of youth, that a large con-
tlngent will retail white and gold edition
Of how to Be Happy, Though Married.;
that Dixey will sell stntfed heifers and give
lessons in grace; that Bob Hilliard will
stand as q tailor's dummy; that Barrymore
Will sell sticks of mint candy for the dear
girls; that Maggie Cline will whoop the
business up, and that Denman Thompson
will lecture every half hour on "What 1
know About Cards" OF course this may
not be true. but these are things that have
been told me- 1t is also said that number
Of well-known managers will sell taffy and
mat the prettiest woman on the stage will
baye charge Of the glove counter. Her name
not given.
THE GREAT NAPOLEON.
Every now and then hear Of some great
person who adores Napoleon Bonaparte; :;
VINO collects locks of his hair and pieces of
MS clothes, and who tries to stand and look
IKE MIN. Bonaparte was never q hero of
mne, but he did say one good thing in his
lifetime. 1t is this: "No man dealing with the
pressure OF business can be expected to write
+0SiDIo uduu, aI1 ne can 90 Is TO SCI down
uo'S and leave it to others to Gecipher
them." There is an immense amount of
ruth this; of course, it is little hard on
Sqe people who have to decipher the dots.
nY grandmother wrote a clear, fine Italian
nand on letter-sized paper, and thought
hothlng of sending eight pages of ad vice and
nilormatlon to her daughter at school. II
su sue were living to-day, she would think that
SyulS yulS generation had never learned to write.
puu that is just where the trouble comes in =,
.uey nave. They began all right, but they
were nipped In the bud. At a very early
ose, each one Of us carefully and plainly,
,,i; "itn fine pen and black ink, immor-
%tiAeu that truth; Perseverance is
~. Sue secret of success" Later in the book
=. iva was announced in the same way that
\ honesty is the best policy" And these
t.oaI truths were in round letters with
UoautlIul shadings; the LIS were tall, the rs
tba IRE snort, the Is were properly dotted, and
uo II old not have tails like Qs. All life
SSouieu falr and the copy book especially so.
q a success had just becn made when it was
nuouhced that we would have to begin all
Il W.. t again; that the angular English hand
mai III vogue, and we had to sit down,
Ia IaAe our Us sharp, uncross our Ts, forget
iro ro sslaidlng. and bring out In most vindict-
# in, iaS9lon sS1. and the sharpest English writ
hgo;, II at 1rst you don't succeed, try, try
81 SS Sa,u' And the consequence was-well,
Ho Ionsequence OF this hybrid teaching is
S.d uandwrlting of the American woman
81 ruay 1t is not ineligible and it lacks
esn 'Iacler. 1t is not handwriting that you