davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
Reforming q Parrot.

A Plttsburger, says the Pittsburg Chronicle,
who spent part of last summer In England.
tells an incident which sadly disturbed the re.
ligious peace Of parish In Penzance.
A maiden lady. Of that town owned parrot,
which somehow acquired the disagreesbls habit
Of observing at frequent intervals:
II wish the old lady would die"
This annoyed the birds owner, who spoke to
her cuFate about IL.
~ think we can rectify the matter" replied
the good man. II also have a parrot and he is
a righteous bird. having been brought up In the
way he should go. will lend you my parrot
and l trust his influence will reform that de-
PRAYED bird OF yours"
The curate's parrot was placed in the same
room with the wicked one. and as soon as the
two had become accustomed to each other the
bad bird remarked:
81 wish the old lady would die"
Whereupon the clergyman's bird rolled up
his eyes and in solemn accents added
"We beseech thee to hear us, good Lordl"
The story got out in the parish and for sew
eral Sundays it was necessary to omit the litany
at the church services.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

1t is asserted that New Mexico is willing
to come into the union under law provid-
ing that only the English language shall be
taught in the public schools. Only the
English language should be taught in the
public schools of every state. II parents
think their children would be benefited by
a knowledge of any other language, let
them have their children taught that Ian
guage outside Of the public schools. In the
west the Germans are asking to have their
children taught the German language. and
people Of other nationalities are demanding
the same thing. The demands made upon
the public schools are TOO great.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

The Secretary Of War is extremely
anxious to get better material for the ranks
of the army. Therefore, in his annual re-
port, he makes some suggestions looking to
making army life more attractive for pri-
yate soldiers and to the enlistment of men
whose morals are as good as their physical
condition. Perhaps the secretary might get
some help in carrying out the reform be de-
sires If he should inquire Of the private
soldiers if there is anything in the treatment
they receive that makes army life distaste-
ful to them.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
A Very Much Forsaken Country.

Capt. John Miner Of the Light Infantry is one
OF the stanchest democrats In the district, says
the Washington Post, He was the chief mar
shal of the recent torchlight procession in
honor of the Cleveland victory. He tells good
story on himself in connection with his trip to
the Chicago convention. While en- roate to
Chicago be thought he would feel the public
pulse along the road, so at the various stopping
places he got out on the rear platforIn and
made short speeches in favor of Senator Hill
The name OF HM did not arouse enthusiasm,
greatly to the surprise of Capt. Miller who be
fore leaving Washington had an idea that the
democrats OF the country were hungry for Hills
nomination. Not a hahd was clApped 70 re-
Spouse to Capt Ailler's eloquepee anti the
train reached little towp out In Ohio, There
was one man In the crowd applaadsd the name
Of Hill quite vigorously. Capt. Miller paused
In his speech, jumped of the train and rushed
up to the man, saying:
My dear friend I am glad to know that
there is one mau tn this God ;forsaken country
who appreciates the name of Hill"
Il don't belong here" replied the man. 81
calne Qua on the train with you, Capt. Jack"
That pat an end 10 Capt. Mnler's electioneer-
ing for Senator Hill.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
Improve Federal Methods.
From the Chicago Times Dem. J.

hToR TIE Chtcu0o ItneS (Den.l
II viii be noted in the report of the Attorney
General OF the United States that no less than
1924 criminal prosecutions were terminated
during the Last year. This is extraordinary con
sidering that all these criminal cases arise out
of violation not Of ordinary criminal laws but of
those statutes which the United States is com
PEELED in self-protection to make concerning
offenses against the revenue and postal laws
and the like. Looking through the total il is
found that the proportion Of scquittals and Of
cases nolle pressed, discontinued, or quashed is
very great One reason for this disproportion
Of petty character, such as under state laws
concerning like matters would be mere INSIDE
meanoTs and could readily be disposed of by
justice Of the peace, but under the federal
system there is no officer corresponding to the
justice Of the peace.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

MIR. Tracy, Secretary of the Navy. speak
Ing OF the intention he had some time ago
OF resigning said that he was not q rich
man. and that he really could not afford to
hold cabinet position. The salary is
$1,000, and be had spent, he said, SIS, 600
every year he had lived in Washington, and
had not been extrevagant There are hun.
dreds OF objects to which cabinet officer
has to give money of which the public
knows nothing The truth is the salaries OF
the members of the cabinet ought to be in.
creased Only rich men can afford to hold
cabinet positions.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

The report of the treasury department
just issued shows that there is now in circu-
lation s37, ZOO, 900 more than there was In
December, 1891. There is more money, per
capita, in circulation now than at any previ-
GUS time in the history of the country. But
nearly all of it is in the great cities, particu-
iarly New York, where money is cheap and
plentiful. What is especially needed is q
plan that will bring about more equal dis.
tributiOn of MONEY!
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

1t begins to look as IL the estate of Daniel
B. Fayerweather, who was New York
millionaire, and who died in November
1891, would be wasted In court and lawyers
fees. He left SIS, 800. 900. the greater part of
which he wished distributed among the
leading colleges of the country. An attack
upon the will has been made in the courts,
and 1t is pretty safe to say that before the
litigation is ended the biggest part of the
estate will have disappeared.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

Work has been begun in the ship yard of
the Cramps at Philadelphia On the great
ocean liners for the international Naviga-
ton Company. There are to be five of these
steamers, and they are to be 500 feet long
and go feet beam each. These ships will be
awaited with great interest. They will be
much the largest ever constructed in this
country. The effort will be to make them
superior in every way to those constructed
In Europe.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

A leading republican paper in New York
says that President Harrison in his message
laid down the policy the Republican party
should follow, which is to maintain the Nc
Kinley tariff intact. 1t is probable that 1t
Is in pursuance of that policy that the party
Is now trying to steal senatorships in some
OF the western states
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
Trush About Pensions Demanded.

E'c" VIC 1fTHtVItebu ReUHOttCuh una J.
Let all the names be published. II is fair that
the people should know who are the recipients
Of their bounty It is just TO the soldiers-and
those who are worthy and deserving and who
need and justly should receive the help Of the
government IN whose service they sacrificed
themselves, would read their names on that list
with pride, aud SO would all the people. But
those who are taking pension money to add to
incomes already ample, and the thousands of
the unworthy who have sworn falsely and OBJ.
tanned pensions to which they are not entitled,
would not like to meet the public gaze
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

A number of republican leaders had q
conference in Washington on Saturday, and
Immediately afterwsrd Gen. Clsrkson left
for the west. The impression is that he has
gone to Montana to assist in fixing the leg
hlasurs Of that state so that the repup-
Hans viii control it and elect republican
toths United States Senate. The repub-
leans are making extraordinary efforts to
r=saIn control Of the Senate.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

Ar humble emplove of the Missouri Pa
el9Ac ID reported as saying that Jay Gould
waited the company to give each of its en-
Fanyss two suits of clothes year Some
eody must have been imposing upon that
humble individual. But from all accounts
Mr.. Gould was not at all illiberal with his
employees. He was willing 70 pay for good
service a fair price. The two suits OF
clothes story, however, is q ueu Ous-
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

The grip Of Senator Quay on Pennsylva-
mia politics appears TO be about as great as
ever it was. His friends will be chosen Of
ficers Of the legislature, and they win see to
il that the senator is reelected by a hand
some majority. Notwithstanding the dis
aster his party has suffered be comes to the
front smiling and happy.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
Down on the Press.
From the Baltimore Ne,os

MUM TITu,
The Aston family make the solemn declara.
ton that they will never again ianswer an ia.
quiry or hold any communication with repre-
sentative Of the press. Why not 20 to the
length of ceasing TO read newspapers? This
would isolate them almost completely from the
world and its proceedings, and leave them in
the solitude of their own sublimity. But it is
safe to say that they would miss the news
papers more than the newspapers would miss
thaua
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

The newspapers of New York are not yet
through talking Of Jay Gould. They say the
attendants at bis funeral represented com.
bined wealth of $500, 900, 900. If they are all
the same sort Of men Mr.. Gould was the
public will not be benefited by their
wealth. And yet shrouds have no pockets.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
Qua NEW YORK. OFFICE,

Ma. J. J. FLYlN, General Advertising Agent
Of the MonsrNa Nxvs Office q Park Row,
New York. AnAdvertising business outside ei
the stases Of Georgia, Florida and South Caro-
bna viii be managed by him
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
Hating the Sin but Helping the Sinner

FFont the Neto York Herald URd.).
The clergymen of Pittsburg have done them
selves very slender credit in their treatment of
outcast women They have managed to make
the contrast between their attitude and that of
the Master SO conspicuous that they have been
pronounced guilty of practical heresy" by pub.
lie opinion
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
FLAvoRING EXTRACTS.
The incest and
Most Natural

The finest, purest, strongest
and best flavors for cakes,
buildings, pastry, ETC., are DR..
Prices Delicious Flavoring
Extracts. In this age of
adulteration, consumers owe
it to themselves to patronize
manufacturers who have an
established reputation for
placing in the market pure
articles. DR.. Prices Extracts
for purity have the endorse
ments of the leading chemists
of this country. They are
used by the United States
Government. The best no
tells and restaurants use them.
The largest and finest grocers
sell them, and they are des-
tined to take the place of all
other Flavoring Extracts.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
Registered at the Postodfce in Savannan.

-
The M0RSINs NEws is published every day in
the wear. and is served to subscribers in the
CITY at 81 90 q month, s. 90 for six months and
$40 90 for one year.
The MORNING NEWS, By mol, one month,
81 90; three months, 50 20; six months Is 90;
one year, so 90.
The MOANING news, by mad, six times week
without Sunday issue, three months, 81 90;
az moLshs, - 90; one year, - 90.
The MoRSINo news, Iri-Weekly, MONDAYS,
Wednesdays and Fridays, or Tuesdays, Thurs
days and Saturdays, three months, u 70; six
months. - so: one year, 20 ".
The SuNpAY EEws, by mail, one year, 81 %.
The wEEKLI News; 6v mod, one yee5, ~ .:
roetsl orier check or registered letter. Cur
Fency sent by mail at risk of eendexs
Letters and kilograms should be ahoreSSon
INCOMING NEws" Savannah, Ca -
Transient advertisements, other thAn sFeclAl
column, local or reading notices, Amuseh t'ls
and cheap or want column. 10 cents Lhs,
Fourteen lines Of agate type-equa 70 one
Inch space In depths the standard on mes s-
nremeut Contract rates and discounts maoe
known on application at business ot1ce.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

After all the talk that il the republicans
in Massachusetts had uot made mistakes in
casting their ballots to such an extent the re-
publican candidate for governor would have
been elected. 1T turns out that the democratic
candidate, Gov. Russell, was elected by a
plurality OF over 2 500. The official count
has been made and the republican guberna-
torial candidates will have no further reason
to say that il so many republican voters had
not made serious mistakes he would have
been chosen. Mr.. Halle ought to be sat-
isfied that he was not beaten out OF sight.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13

One governor of Tennessee kept H. Clay
King, of Memphis, of the gallows, and IL
now remains to be seen whether another
governor will give him his freedom. Il will
be remembered that he was convicted Of
numbering David Poston. Mrs King and
daughter are said to be in Nashville seek.
ing pardon for Mr.. King.
The morning news. [volume] (Savannah, Ga.) 1887-1900, 1892-12-13
CURRENT COMMENT
Why an Extra Session Mey Not Be
Called.
From the Chicago Tribune (Repl

Mr.: Cleveland's visible perplexity in the mat
ter of deciding whether or not Il is best 10 al
the incoming congress together next March n
extra session may grow out of natural no
luctance TO turn the Hon. Henry w. Blair looss
ON the country again.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-01

She hctchsled the fax and cauied the
wool, and wove the linen, and spun the tow.
and made the clothes for her husband and
ten children. She made butter and cheese
sne dipped tallow candles, 10 light the house
Al night. and she cooked al the food for her
household By an open fire place and q brick
oven Nes: and when she was forty years Of
age. she WAS already IN old lady whose hest
days were over. Her shoulders were bent and
her joints enlarged by hard work, and she
wore spectaclcs and a cap.
Her great granddaughter. with an tie
modern conveniences for comfort refinement
and luxury, may be as charming and attract
I've Al forty i've IS ot twenty Especially Is
tins true II She preserves her health bv the
Uso Of Dr. fisrce's Favorite Prescription.
which wards of on female ailments and ir-
resyuiarities, cures them If they already exist
keeps the life current bealfhful and vigorous
ana enables tie woman Of middle age 20 re-
tam The freshness Of Cirlhood ,I.1on brow and
caiosk, the hght Of youth in her eyes and
Is elasticity ia her step.
Go 10 your drug store. pav q dollar. ret
bottle eIlc try it-tTy a second third II nee
essary, Before the third ones been taken
yo1 i know that there's 4 remedy to help Won
4 lon yol Il keep c1 ard curo'n come
But n yol Shouldn't feel the help- should
be disappointed in the results - You'll find
a ss,-TssI.tce printed On the bottle-wraupe-
that Il get tzEour money beck for you.
C4n yol ask -orei
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-01
Smoking and Eating.

When the habit has once been aequir-
ed most smokers no longer feel any disa-
greeable effects. Indeed, there are some
who can give themselves up to this en-
joyment the moment they sit down to a
meal These, however, are the excep-
ton. In general, smoking takes away
the appetite. After eating, however, the
desire for q cigar becomes irresistible
Then We pass through the psychologist
moment, and the pleasure which one ex-
periences then is more ecstatie than at
any other time of the day. For certain
smokers pipe or a cigar is an essential
condition of good digestion, but there are
others with whom either causes gastric
troubles.
Nervous people who lead a sedentsry
life-those especially who do an office
business-if they smoke before their
meals lose, little by little, their appetite.
A painful anxiety and nausea takes its
place There are certain smokers who
cannot light cigar at certain times OF
the day without feeling a sensation of
heat which accompanies the action
Jules R0ckard IA RcrUe des Dettr Mondes.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-01
The Way to Make Them Mind

"The boys won't mind me-" said tbs
senior clerk to the head of the firm. a.
don't like to make acomplaint, bu: wher
you 60 out they do pretty much as they
p'ease aud pay no attention to me-"
That won't do" said the business
man. When I'm out you're in charge
of the office, Of course. You don't try tC
impose on them ?"
No, sir. 1 treat them with the
greatest consideration"
i don't understand it" said the bust
ness man thoughtfully. "Where do you
sit?"
"Atmy desk, sir"
Same desk you sit at when I'm in ?'
Yes, sir"
"0h, said the business man, 81 begin
to see through it all. You haven't made
a study of human nature, have your"
Why, sir, p
Young man." interrupted the bust
ness man, the next time / go out sit
down at my desk. Just plant yourself
there in business like way, and sing out
when you want anything done It'll
make all the difference in the woild."-
Chicago Tribune.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-01
oDeying Orders.

A reporter was sent at the last momen
to write up an important theatrical per
formance in New York. He'hurried to
the theatre, but didn't arrive until after
the play had begun. In getting to bis
place be vas forced to disturb General
Sherman, who with lady, occupied the
seats next to the aisle. The reporter
begged the Generals pardon, but the old
soldier WAS evidently annoyed.
he said nothing, however, until after
the curtain had fallen on the first act.
Then he leaned over toward the report
er with a frown and said:
Young man, you ought TO know that
IT is q great annoyance to be forced TO
stand up 20 let a person pass while the
play is in progress You mnst either get
TO your seat before the curtain rises, or
stay away from the theatre"
The reporter flushed and answered
quickly:
General, am a newspaper man. L
was ordered 10 come 10 this theatre TO
night to report this performance. l came
as quickly as could after I received my
orders. and I apologized for disturbing
You when came in. u"
Here the General interrupted him.
The old mans frown was gone.
aI beg H,,tIr nardon. - he ssid. 81 didn't
understand. You are perfectly in the
right. sir. Always obey orders. Obey
orders if you have to make whole the
atre full Of people get up and stand for
an hour"
Then the General held out his hand
and shook the reporters heartily. They
met several times after that and the dis
tinguished warrior always had a smile
and pleasant greeting for the reporter
who "obeyed orders"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-01
Found 1t Hard 10 Understand

He seems to be in pretty good health, /"
said the tall, lanky man, as young man
with 3 languid air sauntered by.
"He ought to be" said the stout man
in surprise. He takes life easily"
"Well, yes; at least I've never seen
him do anything else" returned the
lanky man. And yet" he went on
With a puzzled air I" sometimes wonder
how it is. Is he truthful mani"
Hes so considered"
The lanky man shook his head doubt
fully and said:
q don't understand it all. 1 was talk
ing with him yesterday and he said that
he would rather work than eat"
He said that ?"
Those were his words"
What did you say?"
81 asked him when he lost his appe-
tite and how he lived without eatin g.
-Chic0g0 Tribune.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-01
An Accommodating Justice

A Texas journal tells the following
story of 3 justice of the peace who held
court on the border line between Texas
and Arkansas A man was brought before
him on charges of murder and horse
stealing. Said the Justice do you want
to be tried by the Arkansas law or the
Texas law ? If by the former, I'll set you
free for stealing the horse, but hang you
for killing the man. If by the Texas law,
III acquit you for numbering the man,
but hang you for stealing the horse
n. !. Pet.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-01

Little Nell-Mamma says the epreaeher
says beauty is a curse. What does that
mean?
Little Brother-That mems il mems
and womens was all ugiF there'd never
be any more ightin' and quarrelin'-
Why wouldn't there ?r'
" Cause nobody al ever marry any
body"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-06-01
A Genuine Surprise.

An Irishman who had lately arrived
in this country found a round piece OF
tin stamped with the name OF big brew.
cry. 4 policeman, whom he consulted
about it, told him for joke that it was a
five-eent piece So Pat went into a sa-
loon and called for beer He drank it
and showed the piece of tin across the
bar. The barkeeper pushed it back and
said: Why, man, that's tinr And Pat
replied: Faith and is ittin? l thought
II was five; have glass yourselfthin."-
Nclr York Tribane