Los Angeles herald., 1892-10-29
THE LAND OF COTTON.
ROBERT GRAVES CALLS IT THE LAND
OF STORIES.
He Has Heard Many Amusing Yarns on
the Stump in Georgia and Here Re-
lates Few Samples of Southern wit
and Sagaeity.
[special correspondence.l


lates Few Samples Of Southern wi
and Sagasity.
Especial Correspondence.1
ATLANTA, Oct. 10.-The south is famou
as 'the land of cotton.n But this is no
its true, it's correct appellation. 1t should
be known as 'the land of stories" Ths
stories of the south? Their name is legion
They meet you at every turn; the first anc
the last man you meet tells you story
and every man between; you get stories on
the cars, in the stages, at the hotel dinner
tables, in your friends houses, everywhere.
In the southland stories are both native
and exotic; they grow wild as weeds, and
are as carefully cultivated as the cotton
itself. If only there was bale of cotton
for every story, how rich the south would
bel Every true southron is a natural story
teller. OF course some are more gifted in
this direction than others, but he who has
little natural gift rapidly acquires the art
by contact and imitation. Not to be able
to tell stories in the south is to be nobody,
and, as for public life, one who spins no
yarns draws nc fat official salary.
Political campaigning in the south is an
orgy of story telling. The man who causes
the most laughs gets the most votes. Of
course southern audiences, like audiences
everywhere, want some logic from their
speakers, but not too much, please. The
chief value of argument is a pretext for
the introduction of the inevitable illustra-
tive story. Whenever the southern cam
paigner asserts, MY opponent says the
protective tariff has helped to make this
country prosperous" or cites any other dec
bx-f
the audience settles back in expectation,
knowing full well the orators next words
will be, "That reminds me of man down
in Tallapoosa county," etc., and then-the
story.
Some campaign speeches in the south are
mere strings of stories joined together like
the links of a bologna sausage, with few
sentences of argument. Such was the
speech which Mr.. Peek, the recent third
party candidate for governor of this state,
prepared for campaign uses year or two
ago. 1t was we'll received. Big crowds
everywhere laughed and shouted at Thad's
stories. His march through the state was
one of triumph.
Finally the opposition managers con-
cluded it was time to clip Mr.. Peek's
wings, and to the difficult task of bringing
that gentleman down they assigned Tom
Norwood, who used to have a seat in con-
ggess, but who gave it up to follow litera-
ture. In the south campaign meeting is
called ''a speaking" and every public
speaker is called an orator-whether he is
or not doesn't at all matter.
So "a speaking" was arranged at which
Peek and Norwood were to 'divide time'-
that is, hold joint debate Norwood
didn't know just how he was going to beat
his man, but he had heard a little about
his opponents stories, and when they met
in the train en- route for "the speaking"
happy idea came to the ex-congressman's
mind.
''By the way, Peek" he said as they sat
side by side in the car, that's an awfully
good story you tell about the old man and
the one eyed mule. How does it go?" And
Peek told him the story, at which Nor
wood laughed till his sides ached. Being
fond of his stories, as story tellers usually
are, and having such an appreciative au-
dience Peek, at times slyly encouraged by
the designing Norwood, reeled off yarn
after yarn out of his speech. His compan-
ion never failed to laugh, and right good
time the pair of ''orat6rs" had ON their
way to ''the speaking"
The arrangement for the joint debate
was that Mr.. Norwood should take the
first hour and his opponent follow. Nor
wood began by saying that he knew his
hearers did not care for a dry, statistical or
legal argument on the questions of the
day, and he didn't propose to bore them in
that manner. He wanted to entertain as
well as to instruct them.
In few moments his discourse led up to
a story, and when that story proved to be
I n
in the general merriment which it elected.
In two minutes Norwood told another
yarn, and again it was one which he had
heard OH the train that afternoon. Peek
then saw through his antagonists game
and looked up with mute appeal on his
face, but Norwood was inexorable He
went on with story after story-every one
Peek's story-and when the last one was
told and the laughter had subsidized tn
master of ceremonies looked about for the
other orator, but Mr.. Peek was not to be
found He had skipped. Poor man, he
had but one speech prepared, and his op-
ponent having delivered that there was no
refuge for him save in flight!
One of the best campaigners in the
south is Fleming Dubignon, scion of d
noted Georgia family, and probably the
next governor of the state. OF course he
tells stories, and one of the best of his
tales was used recently to curb the pride
of an antagonist who had been Dragging
about his ability as lawyer.
A colored man was charged with steal
ing a mule, and placed his case in the
hands of a young lawyer who had few
briefs. The trial came on, the evidence
was heard, and though the attorney for
the defense made a great show of cross
questioning and indulged in tremendous
flights of oratory in his address to the
jury, no doubt of his guilt remained, and
without leaving their seats the good men
and true brought in their verdict
"Well, you are convicted" said the law
yer to his client, ''but 1 did the best 1
could for YOU"
There was no response from the prisoner.
81 say" resumed the attorney, "you
have been found guilty, but you must ad-
nit made good fight for you"
Still no response.
'Doyou understand, persisted the coun-
sci, you must go to Jail, though l did the
best | could for you? In prison you won't
have use for any money you may happen to
have in your clothes, so you'd better pass it
over to me-"
''Ain't got no money" said the culprit,
finally finding his tongue.
What! You haven't any money!"
No, sab. An if I'd a-had any money I'd
"a hired me u lawyer"
Clark Howell, the brilliant young editor
of the Atlanta Constitution, has q parrot
story which is worth repeating. A friend