The Colfax chronicle. [volume] (Colfax, Grant Parish, La.) 1877-1981, 1892-09-10
PuNGsNT PARAGRAPHS.


-Cora-"You'd make trusted bank
cashier, Jake" Jake (much fiattercd)-.
"Why SO, dear?" Cora tyawning)-
you'd never skip out. MY. Herald.
There are some rich men am Ons
the lawyers" "Well, they won't re-
main very long rich if they've got among
the lawyers. dorchester Beacon.
Don't you think baby is like
mamma, George?" asked Mrs. Honey
ton. very He talks all the time but
never says auythiny."-N. Y. Herald.
-"Drawiny-Room Inanities-She-
''No, don't sit there, Mr.. S2losher-
th,t's my ugly side!' He wishing to
please)-''Well-a-really l don't see
any difference.'-Punch.
Cotton is now grown in Turkestan
and the Russian provinces OF Central
Asia, the quantity produced being 81
$50, 900 pounds, or say $4,000 bales, in
1888, and 50 500, 900 pounds in 1889.
"A Vital Difference -Wickars-"I
don't believe there is mach difference
betw zen genius aud insanity" vickars
80, yes, there is; heap. The lunatic
is SIRE of his boari AMI clothes. -
Young People.
Mrs Chinner seems to have a very
pleasant time of it." pleasant time?
Why that wonln's life is one complete
round of enjoyment. ut is?" at is
that. She belongs to seven sewing
circles. IN. Y. Press.
--"Why are you SO silent?" she asked
charmingly. II am collecting my
thoughts" replied Gus de Jay. "You
will have valuable collection
Thanks" "You know, rarities are
always highly Observation-Disclosures
Star.
-Reynard-"He called me a coward,
bully and liar; would you advise me
to fight him?" Axle tree-'T don't see
what else you can do; you would prob
ably lose a suit for siander."-N. Y.
Herald.
of Course.-Mrs. Gazzam-"The re-
moval of an entire tongue has been sue
cessfully performed by Philadelphia
surgeons, ami the patient still lives"
--Gazzam- The patient was
man. Detroit Free Press.
Mrs. Youngwife-'Could you tell
by my manner that had been married
but short timer Mrs. Thirdly
Easily" Mrs. Youngwife-''How?
Mrs Thirdly-"Well, you seem to be-
lieve every thing your husband tells
you. boston Post.
--Beaver-"What have you got a red
neclStie for, old man? Don't You know
they have gone outY' Melton-"Yes,
but am going to barber shop to get
shaved to-day" Beaver-"Whats that
got to do with your necktie?" Melton
Its the only kind l can wear that
doesn't show blood. "-Clothier and Fur
nisher.
--Sniggs ION his deathbed) ~ should
like to see Wigs before 1 die" Mrs.
Sniggs-"What do you want to see him
for? You know he's disreputable
character and the wickedest man in
town. And besides, dear, you are sure
to see him some time on the other side.
Boston Transcript.
-Applicant-"I understand that you
want a reporter?' Editor-"Yes, l
want a man to do verbatim work Are
you stenographcr?' Applicant-"No,
sir; but am rapid writer. used to
be an actor and have had experience in
writing stage letters" Editor-"Ah!
You're just the man we want. "-Boston
Transcript.
"A Sinecure.-A certain physician,
who has not got much practice, hired a
small colored boy to accompany him in
his visits and hold the horse. "How
does yer like yer new placer" asked the
boys mother when he came home on
Saturday night. II likes it fustrate.
We neber has to stop at de houses at all
like de udder doctors. jess gifts all de
ridin' wants." was the reply.-N. Y.
Truth.