davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
The Mothers Fault.

Small Boy teomplainingly)-W
isn't thur any griddle-cakes this morn
ing?
Mother CreprOvingly)-Because you
neglected TO 90 TO the store yesterday
and get one some egss, as told you.
Small Boy with an iDjuted air)-You
didn'ttill me they was fer griddle-cak
Good News.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
Catarrh in New England.

Ely's Cream Balm gives satisfaction to
every one using il for catarrhal troubles.
C. K. Mellor, Druggist Worcester,
Mass.
l believe Ely's Cream Balm is the best
article for catarrh ever offered the public.
Rush & Co, Druggists, Worcester,
Mass.
An article Of real merit-C. P. Alden,
Druggist, Springfield, Mass.
Those who use it speak highly Of it,
Geo. a. Hill, Druggist, Springfield, Mass.
Cream Balm has given satisfactory re-
sults-W. P. Draper, Druggist, Spring
field, Mass.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
Then He Dropped the Subject,

.Ten Thousand dollars for dogi" he
exclaimed, as he looked up from his
newspaper. 'Do you believe anyone
ever paid any such price, Msria?"
Pm sure l don't knoE, James" she re-
turned, without stopping her needIework
even for a moment. ~Does the paper
say that much was paid?
Yes, there's an article on valuable
dogs, and it speaks Of one that was sold
fer $4,000. don't believe it"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
Good Looks.

Good looks are mora than skin deep,
depending upon a healthy condition OF
all the vital orsans II the Liver be in
active, You have bilious Look and if
your kidneys be effected you have a
Pinched Look ifyour stomach be dis
ordered you have 4 DysPeptic Look.
Secure good health and you will have
good looks. Electric Bitters is the great
Alternative and Tonic, acts directly upon
these vital organs. Cures Pimples,
Blotches, Boils and gives a good COM
plexion. Sold at J. n. Snyder's drug
store, soc. per bottle.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
He Feared She Could.

Little brother-How much DO you
weigh, Mr.. Dangle?
Wangle-About 80 pounds, my man.
Why do you ask
q heard sister tell ma that she wss
going to throw you over her shoulder if
Mr. bangle proposed, but I don't believe
she can 10 it, do you ?"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
Nature and Art.

Tommy, who had been having some
severe lessons on using his knife, was
sent on. on an errand to the family
washer woman. When he reformed he
said
4 had some dinner with her little
boy, mamma, and he doesn't eat with
his knife, ether
i suppose his mother has taught him
il wasn't polite TO eat with his knife, -
said Tommy's mamma.
Nom" answered Tommy, regreifully,
''he eats with his fingers."-Dsfroa Frss
Press.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
Potatoes for Pigs.

In experiments eonducted st the Wis
eonsin station it vas found that in fat
tening hogs 80 pounds Of potatoes took
the place Of i7S pounds Of eornmeal, or
in other words, i3 pounds OF potatoes
we're required to take the place Of l00
pounds Of eornmeaL This makes one
pound Of coFamezl worth nearly ~
pounds Of potatoes. As several lots oi
animals were experimental on It's har-
dly possible that the results are very far
from the average.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
That Explains It.

a New York artist was recently visit
ed by lady friend. The artist was
printing an angel.
Why do yol always paint your an
g'ls with dark hair and black eyes ?"
asked the friend.
It's a great secret, aud it might get
ma into trouble if you were to give it
away"
-0h, not for the world
Well, the reason paint my angels
with bis, < hair and eyes IS because ny
wife IS a blor de"
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04

A husband and wife were arraigned
before a police justice for fighting in the
street. A friend accompanied them.
did You see the commencement of
the quarrel?" asked the magistrate Of
the friend.
''Yes, sir; it was two years ago" vas
the reply.
How, two years?"
Yes; was a witness to their mar
riage."
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
Caleb Gushing Was an Early
Riser.

\ Washington real estate man, wishing
show Caleb Cushing piece Of property,
was told 10 call at o'clock in the morn
ing. The man wss not accustomed to
such early hours, but was advised by one
who knew Mr. Cushing 10 be prompt
As he drove to the door at the appointed
time Mr.. Cushing was on the steps,
Er.sa Pg9
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04

Two doctors OF an Eastern town.
To lcarning much inclined.
Ncrc called 70 sec . gentleman,
Whose health was undermined.
The first one used Lis stcthoscope
Upon his patient meek.
I" ] find" quoth he, ''one lung is gones
You cannot live week
To this the other wise u. D.
Nchcmcntly objcctcd-
81 see" quoth he, IS an nay see.
Your kidneys arc cEcctcd-'
These wise men argued loud and long,
Yet tho pa;.tIlt owes recovery
fNo- 70 tlosc GGc.nf'5- TAT to-
Pacrcc's Coilcn Medical DiscoverJl
There arc some patent medicines that are
more marvellous than z dozen doctors pre-
scriYtiCns, bit they're Lot those that profess
70 cure crcrgthiag.
Everybody, now and then. feels run
down, played clt. - They've TIE VIII, but
no power 10 generate vitality. Thsy'ro not
sick enough 10 call 4 doctor, but Just TOO sex
70 be well 1hlf's where the right kind of
a Patent medicine comes in. and does for
dollar what tho doctor wouldn't Go for lcSs
than fivo CT ten
Eyc nut IA CIR claim for DR.. Pierce's Cold
en- Medical Discovery.
V-c claim it 20 bo IN unoqualsi remedy to
purify the blood and invlsorate tho whole
system.
It-sthe cieqpcst blood purifier, sold through
druggists, no matter low many doses are Of
fered for a dollar.
IYhY2 Because its sold on a peculiar
plan, and you only pay for the good you set.
CSn you aSk U0rel
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04

Applicant see you want a man to
run the elevator.
OWner Of Bnilding-Yes; but 1 Hant
ne who won't occupy all the room him
elf.-Tr,ah.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04

plttsourRh Female College an d
70 teachers Unsurpassed advantages. Superior
Rome comforts and care 3sth year begins sept
10 send for catalogue 20 the President
Jni5--em- A. H. NO RCROSs. D. d.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
Not a Bad Plan.

Ny dear old friend, how were you
able to acquire such an immense for
tuner"
By very simple method"
What IS that ?'
When I was poor made out l was
rich, and when I was rich made out
t.at was poo" Sittings.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
URSIyA BOROUGH.
sale to eOmm.nce at 10 O'Clock, A. N.
JoHN HAMER,
Treasurer of Somerset County, Pa.
TREAsUEER'S OFFIcE,
Somerset, April l3 1892

T. s-Persons paying taxes on any of the lands
advertised before the day OF sale viii be charged
20 cents for advertising and fees
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
A PutupJob.

Mother-Get of of that table at ono
Boys-Not while two rats are in the,
-oom.-Trnih.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
Warned

Cholly ito his aunt from the country
-Hyo viii, aunt. I will take you to
Wall street to-day.
Aunt Waybaek-Yes; but take that
thar red necktie ofFen or yerll have all
them thar bulls after yer I've read about.
Judge.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
In School.

Teacher-What is quickness?
Seholar-Quiekress is when a person
drops hot plate.-Judgs.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
TREASURER'S SALE
UNSEATED LANDS.

Agreeably TO the provisions Of an Act OF As
sembiy of Pennsylvania, directing the mode OF
selling unseated lands for taxes passed the 18th
day Of March, a. D.. ISIS and the several supple
ments thereto, the Treasurer OF Somerset County,
hereby gives notice tbst unless the school, Coun-
", Building and Road Taxes due on the follow
ing unseated lands are paid before the day Of sale
the whole such psrI OF such traaet or part el OF
land a. viii pay the taxes and costs Viii be sold
et the Court House, in Somerset Borough, on
MONDAY. JUNE 13. 1892.
The Somerset herald. [volume] (Somerset, Pa.) 1870-1936, 1892-05-04
STNNT

FAtAt- hlltA1A A-hlu
2S9 Roddy ]. D. Scheli wm. p,
Wolf d. and Gnagy JOhni<-. 1 Oi
$50 Lichty Abe 65
go Forward Ross, Berkley Sam. 76O
62 Miller John A., & Ehlen F.,
$50 Beachy. Keim & IiviDgOOd,
Brenizer. Il IS
= Saylor Harmon, Wsltz-- ! 3
The Progress., 1892-11-26

becoming the admiration of tho en-
lisbtened country.
II we will but talk, write, declaim,
declare, crate and essay as zeslously
on this subject as we do on political
ones, there would soon be such a
stream of desirable immigration pour
ing into North Louisiana as would
enthuse the most slothful.
How many will follow THE Proc
REss in changing the subject and en-
tering upon the discussion of this
other question:
AS many as will, let them say, aye.
The Progress., 1892-11-26
-------a----
PRESS ECHOES.

Louisiana Builder: Mr.. Bern
stein, q noted banker of New York,
is confident that in less than three
years, he will succeed in laying a
pneumatic tube across the Atlantic
by means of which three daily mails
may be rece,ved in both England and
America There is, says the Amer
ican Stockman, at this time, pneu-
matte tube in operation between
London and Liverpool. During the
Worlds Fair another will be in oner-
alton between Chicago and 81. Louis
which II is expected, will capture the
attenuation of business men. The
cost of the ub-Atlantic tube is esti-
mated at SEE, 100000 half of which
amount has been subscribed. When
the tube is completed, it is expected
that branch tubes will connect all
towns and cities with the tube term
The Progress., 1892-11-26

MONROE WEIouls.-Slm B
Vidette: Ths cotton buyers
Monroe want TO buy cotton "a
country and demand that tae
shall agree to take Monroe v1
This is wrong, and the only n
put a stop to it is for every n
refuse to MAKE any such
Every depot in this parish hss'
Of accurate Fairbanks cotton ,
1T correct weights is what the p
fixed on, then let the men who
the cotton be present when
weighed. We see no good .
why an honest buyer sbonld .
TO the seller seeing his own Q
weighed. An even balance q
scales is the only correct y
weigh cotton. Planters, SO
your rights.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

Run TO HIS DEATH. Review: Last
Friday morning no little excitement
WAS created in the western environs
of this city by the presence of fleet
footed deer. He had been chased by
hounds until his strength had be-
come exhausted. lie went into the
river at the Bluffs on the northern
limits of the city when be was brought
to bay by the dogs. Buddie Lemce
discharged two loads of small shot
into his head, crippling him, and Mr..
Leon Greneaux completed the work
by killing him. The deer weighed
149 pounds and WAS a four prong
buck. He had evidently been chased
a long distance and sought the city
limits to escape his relentless pur-
suers.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

Ibid: The churches OF Nev
city, of sll denominations, cod
million dollars per annum;
ments, seven millions; the CIV
ernment, ihirtee nmillions; liqo'
hundred millions.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

Golden Censer: Greeley
with two thousond FIVE hundr'
habitants, has six churches 2
thirty thousand dollar school .
but no paupers, no jail, no po'x'
no liquor-selling soloons.
The Progress., 1892-11-26
Everything Goes.

Chollie-I proposed 10 Miss Ps1e
yesterday and was accepted.
Chappie-Congratulations, deab 4
~ Chollie-But the engagement va !
OF today.
Chappie-Congratulatious, desh
Brooklyn Life.
The Progress., 1892-11-26
THE PROGRESS.
LET US CHANGE THE SUBJECT.

now let us change the subject.
We have o,her matters to discuss
with the country which are equally
rs important, interesting, intructive
and prosperous as politics.
Vow il the time when the tide Of
Immigration is seeking location for
homes. As The icy breath of Winter
drives them around the fireside, whis-
ties ominously around the house cor
mere, sighs under the ewes, seeking to
gam tormenting entrance ut every
available access, the inmates sigh for
more congenjal quarters, where the
Spring and Summer climates do not
grant yields, the greater part Of
which must go TO pay tribute to the
demands Of Winter. Now. then, is
the time for North Louisiana to act.
Let Caddo send them messengers
ike TIE PRoGREss, which will teach
them that here is the spot they have
50 often wished for Tell them that
our soil readily responds to every ear
nest, intelligent call for subsistence,
aDd more. That it is generous in the
bestowal of its gifts to those who are
worthy. That in it's confines are
farmers who are fast reaching the
goal of prosperity, while others have
long since enjoyed home on her
shores. Tell them that our climate is
salubrious, making the citizens there
Of healthy and vigorous. That the
people are law-abiding, frugal aud in
durtrious. That churches and schools
abound in large numbers, showing
that both spiritual and educational
enlightenment are appreciated here.
That our pride is the well-equipped
public schools, which are under the
iutelage Of well graduated teachers
whose experience has made them
competent instructors for the pupils. |
Tell them that we likewise have a
full graded public high school situ-
ated in Shreveport, which is open to
scholars of sufficient advancement
from all parts Of the parish.
Let DeSoto parish use the same
medium to instruct home-seekers on /
the merits of its province. Let her
tell them that her farmers take equal
rank with any in the South or West
for practicability. That they are
noted for their progressiyeness, their
intelligence, success and general ad-
vancement in the agricultural line.
That they have splendid financial
standing and are not theoretical
IarmerF, but have acquired their po-
sition in the commercial world. from
he products of their soil in the regu-
ar line OF their vocation.
Let Bossier send abroad the glad
tidings which she can convey to the
migrant. That she too has enticing
'iferings to lay at their feet. That
Ter soil is not barren, but exceeding
y fruitful. and will not send back a /,
old and unremunerative response to )
hose who search her earth for susie /,
lance and competence That her !,
ariners are well-to-do, enlightened :,
nd cultivated. That education is
lonored. respected, upheld and pro-
noted in her borders.
Natchitoches, Red River, Webster,
5ienville. Claiborne, Sabine, Rspides, ! !,
lincoln, Ouachita, and all other =
Worth Louisiana parishes, could tell !,
he same cheering, enticing story, b
md more; they could add that horses. n
mules, sheep, jacks and cattle of yari- 2
The Progress., 1892-11-26
Just ncyond smItIleresnA

Father" said six-year-oId, WI
Atomsf"
Atoms, my boy' What do yoa
WHY, the place where everythl'
blown to."-Boston Globe.
The Progress., 1892-11-26
nIado Her Tired.

He asked her ont to have wsU
They passed mn ice cream st1f@
Aud thea the mad declared she
Too tired to walk much more
Detroit Frrl
The Progress., 1892-11-26

BROKE JAIL.-Home Jound|
10: Last night six prisons
were confined in the old iron =
our Jail, managed to break N
sufficiently to permit their EN-.
ter which, with a piece Of inIu|
from the cell, they dug out
until they had made y hoa]
enough to crawl through and
their escape. The cell in wl}|
prisoners were confined has ;
lieve, been condemned for son.|
and was notoriously weak, sud|
prisoners who are charged viii
or offenses are confined in il. n
one entertained the least iau
they would try to escape. But
did, and succeeded. The ma
this is: Bald a new jail sd
will not occur again.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

Donaldsonville Chief: A n
stole the child of Mr.. Adam
neaux Of New Iberia, to hoIds|
age until its father could afz|
pay the acouchment bill.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

faction have heard no.bi,,
theirs aud are unable to get n
isfaction as to the delay IN .
sales. This is surely yerv /,
able state OF affairs, and Will
10th to believe that politics ,s|
anything to do with it vet IN,
tlemen are firmly couvinced !
does and the circumstance \
admit, seem to bear out then
cicas. Can any of our New d
people solve the riddle,
The Progress., 1892-11-26

PoL'TIcs IN RIcE.-Abbevillo Mari
dional: A prominent citizen of the
parish complains to me that bimself
and neighbors are very much puzzled
about singular coincidence regard
ing their rice shipment. Every one
lately belonging to a certain faction
OF the Democratic party has received
returns from their rice-all being
shipped about the same time and 70
the same merchants, while those who
happened to belong to the opposite
The Progress., 1892-11-26

Farmerville Gazette: The tap
railroad from Bastrop to Collins, is
completed, and now the Bastropians
are happy over the daily advent OF
the iron horse into their midst.
Gazette: Mr.. John Donley went to
Shreveport Tuesday, for the purpose
OF having his ewes operated upon by
a skilled occulist. Mr.. Donley's eye
sight has become considerably i'm
paired during the past few weeks.
That's right; Shreveport is the
place to come to have your troubles
relieved whether it is financial dis
tress or bodily ailment.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

Natchitoches Enterprise: The
railroad officers have made an ipo-
vat,on in the order of things which
Will be a boon to the travelling public:
passenger and freight train are now
run, and the traveller will not be re-
CURED to waste half day between
the jnnotion and here. We score one
prog ressive move for "our railroad
aud hope that it will continne its
work until it rivals in every particn-
lar the great trunk line of the coun-
try.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

National Economist: Tom Reed
smiles, Quay says 1t is awful, Gen.
Alger lays it to labor, ex-senator Far
well says Harrison did il, Senator
Hill IS delighted, Gov. Flower SAYS
the tariff caused the convulsion. Di-
rector General Whitney says it was
a revolt Of the people, all Democrats
are happy and some few Republicans
don't care. =
Economist: There will he another
Congress elected in 1894. Before an
other Presidential election the ALI
ance can be the most prominent and
actively exurbent quality in American
politics. Reorganize for the de-
mands-unite for future yictorv
The Progress., 1892-11-26

Livestock Journal: A few quick
growing pigs to consume waste milk,
waste fruit and gather up the frag-
ments Of the oat patch, the pinder
patch, the corn field and the potato
patch, could be raised almost without
expense.
"Quick-growingp not the ''razor-
back" but an improved hog, selected
of some of the popular breeds, with
reference to climate and surround
ings.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

ini. The scheme, although a vast
one. is not improbable, and its orig
inator is shrewd capitalist.
Builder: The saw mills of Frank
lin, La, are shipping lumber TO
Chicago. to be used in the construc-
tion of the Worlds Fair buildings.
The Progress., 1892-11-26

Democrat-Jorrnal: A successfn
experiment OK cotton harvester was
made last Tuesday on a plantation
near Dallas, Texas. In an bour's
work it picked $50 pounds OF cotton.
taking from the plant the first time
56 pounds ard the second time 1S per
cent of the lint. leaving 9 per cent on
the plant and dropping per cent on
the ground. The work was cleaner
than hand picking.
Democrat-Journal: Those OF onr
people who have fondness for .l;t.
erature have an opportunity to culti.
vate that taste Prof. Hsines. of tho
State Normal School, was ia town ON
lost Saturday, and together with the
Rev. L. X. FauntLeIsoy, president of
the Louisiana Chautauqna, organized
a Chautauqua Reading Circle of ff-
teen members. II. T. Livermau. ESQ
was elected president of the circle. .
Miss w. G. Padelford, 1st vice-pr
dent; Miss Irene ELAN, I'd vice -presi.
dent: g. ID. Pickels, secretary and
Miss Belle Taylor, treasurer.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1892-07-01
VARIOUS NOTES.

The Irish Presbyterian church has
aroused itself against the drink traffic
and trafficers.
NJ PAsTEUE. the famous Paris special
list, is authority for the statement that
men who habitually use Intoxicating
spirits are more difficult to cure if Bit
ten by mad dog than temperate men.
AT Titusville, Pa, after the food:
1.-The military and police keep perfect
order; the saloons are kept closed, and
there has been neither plumber nor riot
ing" Could louder comment be made
as to the danger and influence of sa-
looms?
THERE is said to be an abstinence so-
ciety in st. Petersburg with six hum
dred mem bers whose activity has con-
sisted in establishing no less than eight
tea-houses in that part of the city
where drinking places most abound.
An inebriatrs' asylum is also contem-
plated.
THE Zurich society for com batting the
alcohol habit has circulated an appeal
on the continent, pointing out the dam
gers which menace the future of Eu-
rope through the use of intoxicants,
and calling upon people to Show their
patriotism by becoming abstainers.-
Bombay Guardian.
IT is said that the practice of ether
drinking in ireland originated in the
time of cholera, more than forty years
ago, when ''quack" sold drains of
ether as a preventive. Finding the in
toxicant a pleasant one the people CON
tinued its use after ali need or excuse
for IT had disappeared
THERE have been twenty thousand
signatures to the petitions to the Brit
ish government against the India opium
traffic and forty public meetings have
been held to protest against it. In
BON bay two hundred and seventy
opium smokers were among the sign
ers of the anti-opium petition to the
queen.
THE law prohibiting saloonkeepers
TO sell liquors to drunken people has
received a noteworthy extension by q
recent decision in court. 4 drunken
man was found at the bar OF a saloon
at Workington. England. The proprie-
tor and barkeeper denied having sold
the man any liquor. As this assertion
was not disproved the judge dismissed
the case. The chief constable appealed
TO the higher court, which decided that
permitting drunkenness on the prem
ises was clearly an offenSe." Could not
the drunken fellow have been supplied
by friends who bought the liquor at
the bar, which was handed to the
drunkard with or without the knowl-
edge of the barkeeper7
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1892-07-01
LIVE STOCK NOTES.

IT is not a good plan to pasture the
sheep and calves together; the calves
seem - dislike TO eat after the sheep.
WILL it pay the average western
farmer to keep a COW whose calf will
not grow into profitable beef or dairy
animal?
A FEW specialists may breed for but
ter or beef as they see fit, but the ma
iority of farmers must breed and feed
for both.
The farmer that expects to make the
feeding of cattle profitable must select
his animals with refere1ce to their ca
pacity for taking On flesh.
THERE is a considerable difference in
The amount of feed required during
growth and to fatten at maturity differ
snt animals, even among those of the
same breed.-LiVe Stock Indicator.
The Republican. [volume] (Oakland, Md.) 1877-current, 1892-07-01
There's a soi1e difeyenc.

There's a pide difference
between the help that's talked of
and the help that's guaranteed.
Which do you want, when you're
buying medicine?
If you're satisfied with words, you
get them with every blood-purifier
but one. That one is DR.. Pierce's
Golden Medical Discovery. With
that, you get a guarantee. If it
doesn't help you, you have your
money back. On this plan, a medi-
cine that promises help is pretty
sure to give it.
But it's because the medicine is
different, that it's sold differently.
It's not like the sarsaparillas, which
are said to be good for the blood
in March, April, and May. At all
seasons and in all cases, it cures
permanently, as nothing else can,
all the diseases arising from tor
pid liver or from impure blood.
It's the hest blood purifier, and
it's the cheapest, no matter how
many doses are offered for dollar.
With this, you pay only for the
good you get.
Can you ask moreP