The Princeton union. [volume] (Princeton, Minn.) 1876-1976, 1892-02-04

You don't tell me! Haveyou any
thingt show for it?''
8 Faith, and I have" said Clancy.
1--WE g fine, healthy boy, and all the
his father V
o'Grady looked at his friend signifi-
cantly.
4 "Oh, well, " said he "what's the har-
rum as long as the child is healthy?"
The Best Laid Plans, &c.
Mr.. Smartchap, who thinks he sees
the opportunity OF his life-"Happy
New Year Mr.. Hardhardt! have
noticed, however that business has
been very dull lately"
Employer eyes, it has" %"
Mr.. Smartcap-"And your profits
have been greatly reduced, with no
Immediate prospect of Improvement.
Mr.. Hardhardt-7"That is true"
Mr. Smartcap-"I, have therefore
come to you to ask that you reduce
my salary"
Mr.. Hardhardt, in a hurried whisper
20 MS observation-disclosures the poor
fellow while 60 and telephone to the
insane asylum. New York Weekly.
Still in Business. =
The man who stops his paper be-
cause something has appeared in it's
columns OF which he does not ap-
prove, and does it with an air of re-
greet that it is necessary to drive the
publishers into bankruptcy, reminds
us OF the stationmaster who request
ed an increase OF salary and threaten
ed to leave if he didn't get it.
The superintendent replied to his re-
quest by relating STORY
when was young man." said
ne, IL once did as you are doing-I
told the perlntendent of the line I
was then working on what you have
told me. He refused my demand and
J. left; and would you believe it-that
railway line is running YETI"
Youthful DepravitV.
"Papa," he asked, "don't wasps
build their nests of mud?"
'"They DO, my son." said his father.
care wasps good for anything?"
$50 far as we know, Willie, they are
not"
''Then the mud is wasted, isn't it,"
II presume it is"
'"Then it's just like our Irene, isn't
it?"
GLOW SOP,
because it's wasp-wasted.'
And the strong man., who had al
ways felt hopes that Willie sometime
would enter the ministry, went out to
the woodshed and wept.-The Wasp.
Thoughtful.
When a brave man finds himself
preserved from sudden danger, his
first thought is of his companions in
peril. -.
On the coast of Wales a Ife-saving
crew put out for a wreck. The night
was dark, and tremendous sea was
running. Presently the boat was
capsized, and all the men were thrown
out except one, who was fast under
one of the seats.
He righted himself as the others
clambered in again, and his first
words were:
sis there any one drowned besides
me?"
Peculiar Whiskey
II believe, bartender, that I was
little tight last night" remarked Gus
De Smith to the barkeeper OF a fash
ionable Harlem resort.
"Well, you had a. pretty good load
on board.''
Il suppose you put all the drinks
down on the slater"
30, yes"
GLOW many am charged with?''
Thirty whisky-straights.'
That's very peculiar whisky of
whats the matter with it?'
Nothing much, except when I get
tight on it you always see double, re-
marked Gus.
Another Case Of Jimjams.
'Dukane-I suppose you've noticed
the fad the women have of putting
snakes on their clothes.
Gaswell-Yes.
Embroidered snakes, and gilt
snakes and all sorts OF snakes, usedi in
all sorts of ways?" s.ss
eyes" ..z.- -..as~
"Well, don't admire their STYLE"
"Neither do I. They are delirium
trimmings" -Pittsburg Chronicle-Tele-
graph. -. .~
Maternal Wisdom. A..
English Sparrow (of last summers
hatch)-What is this narrow, cooped-
up place, mother?"