The record-union., 1892-04-16

ness. She unlocked the box, threw back
the lld, and there, exposed to her gaze,
was a-fig Leaf.
kyrene's eyes opened wide with
astenishment. "What is this?" asked
she.
Ph9bus answered, in a reverent tone:
1t is precedent, and the costliest dress
ever worn by woman. / should have
liked to have brought you pretempta-
llon costume for your wedding wear, tor
l know you would have looked beautiful
IN that; but it was not SO costly as this,
and had promised you the costliest."
hyrene's eyes were blazing with anger
Very beautiful she looked in her rage, as
she asked, in accents of supreme seorn ::
is this the beautiful wedding rousseau
you was SO anxious to provide for the
Empress of the World She who has
hunted the realms of fancy for the elegant
and the exquisite, and spent her time de-
signing the beautiful, regardless of health,
comfort or expense? OH you old hum
Dug l hate you, and will never marry
you'll"
Phnbus shranlk back amazed. but he
also felt relieved from the apprehension
which had oppressed him so long. Prece-
dent was still to rule, for here was the
ripping wave which proved that true
love never does run smooth" Phebus
now spoke in deprecating tone, and,
with an air OF much dignity, said
My dear Kyrene, l thought to please
you, and you are displeased. 1 brought
you the costliest dress ever worn by
woman, as promised you, and you are
angry at me. / thought that you cared
for Precedent, as l care for Fashion.
Think, for moment, what that fig leaf
has cost the world. If there had been no
precedent for dress there would have
been no dress; that precedent by our
Mother Eve has cost the world all that
has been expended in dress up to this
time. And then, again, if there had been
no dresses to wear, where would you
have been? Could Fashion exist with
out something to exist on? Don't you
comprehend that your existence and
mine are both founded on Precedent?
Let us bury our differences and be united
and we will continue to rule the world,
as we have ruled it,
hyrene began to understand his rever-
ence for the past, and she was also
ashamed OF her exhibition of passion,
winch she knew was not in accordance
with good taste, and ii there was any
thing she was proud of in herself it was
good taste. So she said, very humbly
and softly, II called you an old humbug;
l am sorry"
"Never mind that" said Phebus,
smiling. 'If you marry me you will be
humbug, too"
And may I always select my own
dresses hereafter ?n asked Kyrene.
Certainly" said Ph9bus. 81 am sure
| shall never desire to select lady's
dress again."
Just then the little girl jerked the two
together so quick that their faces coll
lided. The old man on the mountain
peak could not see whether it was their
noses which hit each other, or something
else, but he heard quite a racket.
Old Hymen was sent for, and he tied
them together with one of his Gordian
knots. The little girl stopped down and
united the silken cord from their ankles
and coiled it up, and as she passed the old
man on the mountain peak, on her way
home, she smiled sweetly and said !:
THAT was the most fun l have had in a
long time. They are beautiful pair of
humbugs, and l hope they will be
happy"
That they continued to rule the world
is evident, for you can note the conse-
quences of Fashions sway among mems
business failures, ETC., ETC., and you can
see evidence of Precedents sway among
women in court etiquette, bric-a-b rac,
etc.
AS the old man came down from the
song from-from-from Webster's Die
tionary:
This world of ours is very queer,
But take 1t as you find it;
And II as evil 1t may appear,
Remember who designed it.
For, whether things are good or bad,
Depends on how use them
Our merriest friends will turn quite sad
And leave, if we abuse them.
Virtue itself becomes vice,
If followed too austereIy;
But charity is always NICE
Ii we practice 1t sincerely.
Don't let the rowing tram, coma In
But give him good dinner;
And if you harshly Judge the sin
Don't harshly judge the sinner.
True justice when with mercy mixed
Is most benignant power;
The fruit which ripens is always fixed
BY the poisoning OF flower.
When wit with wisdom is combined
Its influence is extended;
As brilliant colors--we often find
Charm most when rightly blended
might go on with a sermon long,
Full OF maxims truly needed;
But too much preaching, even in song
VIII surely go unheeded.
For this world OF ours is very queer;
But take it as you find it,
And If as evil it may appear,
Remember who designed it.
OLD CRANK.