Iron County register. [volume] (Ironton, Iron County, Mo.) 1867-1965, 1892-05-12
THE TIN-CUP TRICK.
There Was Lots of Fun in 1t Until 1t Wa
Played on an Irishman.

Not long ago a circus visited a town
ont west and pitched the tents in a
large vacant lot near the railroad depot.
u "A short time the small boy, the city
bImmers the country hayseeds and the
sightseers ordinary swarmed about the
place. and at once proceeded to make
life anything but ice-cream and lemon
ade for the railroad officials by project
ing their thirsty carcasses into the wait
ing-roOm and swallowing down great
clippers full of The beverage there espe-
cially set aside to cool the parched
threats of hot and legitimate travellers.
The railroad officials stood all this with
their usual patience until they had filled
the half-barrcl in the corner three times:
and the murky atmosphere of the office
had become 50 laden with their sulphur
Gus CALCULATIONS as to bleach white the
red rose which fair hands had pinned
on the lapel of the ticket agents coat:
and the telegraph operators chin had
sunk forward in despair upon his bosom
while great beads of sweat rolled down
from mis- forehead and made snake
trails all over tn" glossy whitcnes> of
his Chinese Numbered shirt.
Suddenly the bowed head was
Strengthened up with iirk. The tele
graph operator had an idea.
The idea was soon explained and as
quickly acted upon. By means Of an
irtfully-cOncealed wire a connection
was formed between the chain which
fastened the tin clipper To the wall Of
N" Waiting-room and the batteries
used in tn" office. and thus they
were enabled at will 70 send an cleo
trio spark Zigzaging through the anat-
oIny of any one who held the dippcr
in hi, hand.
The first victim was tall raw Oncd
and sun burnt countrymdn. \ pleased
expression circled round the corners of
his enormous mouth when he caught
sight of the half barrel of water. tee
whiz. he remarked. mOpping his
perspiring face with large. red cotton
handkerchief. its hot. feel as if
could Swaller bout Il barrel o water.
and one horny hand started to convey a
cupful of the fluid to his capacious
mouth, waiting wide open to receive it.
But. just before the cup touched his
lips. his arm began to twitch and jerk
violently. while a look of unuttcra BILE
establishment jumped all over his broad
cOuntenance. ''Ge-ru-salam. What's
what's tn matter with tn thing?" he
inquired. staring at the cup. oh"
and the country man leapcd into the
air. while the cup banged against the
wall. The building shook when the
great cOwhide boots brought the coun-
tryman down to the floor. II never
felt like that afOre. he CALCULATED as
he slowly backed off, with eyes bent
suspiciOusly On the cup. Il wonder if
t could ave ben a par'lctic. 1--we
heerd tell on seen things" and he passed
cut of the door and vanished in the
crowd outside.
Now the floor was heard to creak I'M
der the alderInanic tread OF a huge bay
Widowed Dutchman and his Olea-
ginOus. pillOw-shaped frau. They looked
as hot and as uncomfortable as couple
of steam boilers as they rolled up 20
ward the water tank.
Il vas dri as der fish swimming das
dri land on. Trinll. mein liebcr frau.
and the gallant Teuton passed a cup
full of the cooling fluid to his compan-
ion. She seized the cup with avidity
and was about to dump its contents into
the yawning depths of her parched
throat when neT ndnl gave Il series OF
violent jerks. the water flew in every
direction and the cup landed astride the
nose of her astounded spouse. while her
eyes almost popped out of her head
with fright and her jaw fell several
inches.
For a moment the Dutchman was too
amazed to speak: then he rOared out:
Bonner und bitten, katharina. Vat
for you sling die cup NIT mein nose on
und spatter das water der floor all over?
Vas you idiot in der brain. or may bees
you dink you see snakes. Snakes. Veil.
will trink snakes und all" and witt d
look of whitening scorn at his frau.
who still stood with mouth agape. he
TraSped the cup with sledgehammer
grip. deliberately filled it with water
and raised it to his lips. But the in
slant his teeth touched the tin his arm
gave a tremendous jerk. the water few
all over his face and he ieaped into the
air with howl that made the tcle
gra ph wires sing for miles.
--Nein lieber frau, Inein lieber frau.
der teufel list dot tin cup in. Come
quick. the frightened Dutchman ex-
claimed excitedly when he came down.
and Selling his wife by the arm rushed
with her out of the room
For awhile the railroad officials had
Il high old time watching the antics of
their various victims: but the end of
their fun came when Patrick ODonO- |
van walked into the room
He was gigantic Irislnan- with the |
frame and the muscles of Il Hercules. |
His round bullet head was covered |
with a short. thick growth of red hair. |
and his temper wa, quick as his hair |
was red. He was loaded with just |
thing. In Il moment the tin cup was in |
his hand: but the water never reached !
his mouth-that Is. the inside of it The |
instant the electric fluid began foOling |
with the muscles of his brawny arm the |
seized the cup, which he |
fancied was trying to get away from |
him. with both hands in grip that |
crushed the metal. and exclaimed: No,
We don't. We little jumping deevil- Oh.
I'll houldye-Ioly Mither.
The telegraph operator had turned on |
the full current and the big Irishman |
had received a shock that caused his !
short hair to stand up like red porcu-
pine quilts and his arms To twist until |
they felt like two corkScrew> endeavor- |
ing to bore their way through his |
shoulder blades He could not let go |
of the cup and down he came sprawl |
ing upon the floor. The fail broke the |
chain and the electric tiend lost its grip /.
upon the IriShnan.