Hot Springs weekly star. (Hot Springs, S.D.) 1892-1917, 1892-10-07
sprinkles or Spice.

Detroit Tribune
THE announcement of purses for g.
year-olds seems like a bitter partiality
when SO many grown folks have none.
TIE school teachers are getting
tan on their cheeks. Next month
they put rattan on their pupils
Boston Transcript.
SHE-I thought you told me Mr..
Nixon was a la of regular habits.
He-Well, he has been drinking
steadily ever since / knew him.
Life.
TOMMY-The lion is a carnivorous
animal, amt he, paw? Mr.. Figg-
Yes. That is what makes him so
dangerous to meat. - indianapolis
journal.
He (anxiouslN-"Did I understand
you to say Miss or Mrs.?" She de
municipalities" He gallantly)-
"Pray, allow me to make it Mrs.
Troy Press.
Edison has patented 600 inven-
tions, but he has to slap at the sum
mer fly just as vainly as anybody else.
Genius cannot do everything.-Balti-
more American.
snow" SAID the new reporter, as
his eye followed the track of the blue
pencil, II understand what is meant
by an editors line of thought.'-
Washington Star.
DISSEMINATION do you like my
friend bunker? Travers-He ~sasn't
any backbone. Why, the fellow let
me have s. as soon as l asked him.
New York Herald.
SuRFAcE-lsn't Bighel rather
young to be a cynic?: Rowlcy-Oh,
no! He has been graduated a year
and the world hasn't recognized him
yet.-Ncw York Herald.
ROAD AGENT stopping funeral)=
Hold up y'r hands! l want all TIN
money yc've got! Chief Mourncr-
Bless me. Here's the undertakcr's
bill-collcctor already.-Lifc.
TRAvERs-"How long a course does
your son take at college," Dobson-
THAT'S just the question 1 asked. He
wrote back that it would be two
miles with a turn.'"-New York Sun.
MIR. WICKwIRE-Herc is something
you ought to read-an article on
ways a woman II save money. Mrs.
Wickwirc - Does it say anything
about her remaining single?-.ndian-
apolis Journal.
SMITn-You needn't tell me that
dogs don't know as much as human
beings. l took Ponto to church with
me last Sunday. Jones-Yes? Smith
Well, sir, he slept through the
whole sermon.-Life.
Mrs. KEEDICK (praising young Mr..
Adlet to her daughter)-He doesn't
smoke, drink, or swear. He's IL good
boy and would be true to you. Miss
Kcedick Shaking her head)-He's
too good to be true, mamma Truth.
Il SUPPOSE" observed Harry Ho-
jack after the doctor had amputated
both arms as the result of Indepcnd-
ence Day casualties, II suppose that
L shall have to learn to shoot cannon
with my toes by the next Fourth."-
Jury.
A SKIPPER claims to have seen the
sea serpent in the sky. Ii the phc-
nomenal monster has really been
translated, many an ancient mariner
will experience a discouraging loss
of material for new yarns.-Ncw
York World.
Mrs. KEENE-Thcre are times
when / wish 1 we're a man. Mr..
kecne-For instances: Mr.. Keene-
When l pass a milliner's window, and
think how happy l could make my
wife by giving her a new bonnet
Texas Siftings.
II HEAR that young Shiny is dying
of consumption. How does that
happen when he is such a constant
smoker, and tobacco kills the germs
of the disease?:" ooh, Shiny doesn't
smoke tobacco. He smokes cigar
cites. Buffalo Express.
"YouR husband" said the caller.
sympathizingly, was a man of ex
cellent qualities" "Yes," sighed the
widow. "he was a good man. Every
body says so. l wasn't much ac-
quainted with him myself. He be-
longed to six lodges. "-Texas Stiff
ings.
II WONDER why it u.s." said old,
lobe to his wife, that women pre-
fer drowning and men shooting in
case of suicide?:" II suppose" she
replied, as she thoughtfully contem-
plated his nose, that it is because
men hate water so."-Detroit Free
Press.
"DEAR me" exclaimed Mrs. Begosh,
'look at that man comm out of the
restaurant. He's pickin' his teeth
with his pocket-knife." "Humph!"
replied her husband. ahe probably
wasn't raised where they have forks
and SO he don't know no better."-
Washington Star.
SHE aThat couple in front of US
do you think they are married2" He
Yes, l am sure they are. They
have been married a long time, too"
She-"Why, how do you know?" He
Haven't you noticed that when a
pretty girl comes on the stage she
always hands the opera glasses over
right away?"-SOmerville Journal.