The Republican., 1892-05-06
RELATIONS-IN-LAW.
Hints for the Guidance of Young an<
inexperienced Wives.


inexperienced Wives.
One of the first questions asked of 8
newly made bride is how she likes hel
husbands relations, and if circum
stances compel her to take up her abode
with them. the question is usually a
sympathetically pitying one.
Considering the frequent disagree
ments we see in families it is hardly
surprising if we see occasional troubles
among those of different blood, and
often totally different training. The
patriarchal system, while it would give
unity to the nation, is not without indi.
vidual objections. 1t is the hardest OF
all lessons to learn to accommodate
ones own angles to the angles of others.
When newly-made wife goes to live
with her husbands people she often
loses sight of the fact that she is simply
daughter of the house, with no more
than a daughters privileges. In the
flush of her new dignity she is apt to
forget that she is simply on the same
footing as her husbands sisters, as far
as the management of the house is con-
cerned. While she should aid her
| mother by every means in her power,
she cannot expect to give orders indie
pendently, but submit to direction. Nc
household can be a success with two
mistresses, and most assuredly it is the
part of the younger to defer to the elder,
though 1t may not always seem pleas.
ant duty.
Really and truly we don't think any.
thing is more difficult than to live hap
| PLY with relations-in-law. Even where
they love one another, there are SO
many little traits and peculiarities
which cause internal vexation, II the
| jarring elements never come to the sur
face. There is no remedy for it, save
everpresent pa tience and kindness; and
the model daughter-in-law must stand
aloof from family disagreements. She
| must never side with John against
Fanny, or throw her weight with her
She must always remain neutral, or she
| will widen breaches instead of healing
them.
We believe that some of the squibs
and jokes scratched on the walls in
| Pompeii make fun of the mothers-in-
law. This estimable member of society
has been an object of derision of CEN
turies just as if it were our fault that
we become mothers-in-law under some
circumstances. Many mother-in-law
| is as self-sacrifcing as a mother; many
man has reason to bless the woman
| who stands in that relation to him.
There may be scolds and mischief max
ers among them, but they would display
the same Objectionable traits in any
other relation. The implied dislike to
motbers-in-law is about as reasonable
as the dislike for those unappropriated
blessings, old maids.
We can hardly wonder if the loving
mother shows anxiety for the happiness
and comfort of her married darling.
The mistake is in regarding such inter
est as officious. This is mistake on
the part of the son or daughter-in-law;
and the mothers mistake is in thinking
that her child's household cannot be
comfortable without her constant super
vision. A young housekeeper is very
tenacious of her dignity; she likes the
| pomp and circumstance of domestic man
agement, and the young man just ad
vanced to the proud position of husband
feels all the dignity of the patriarchs
vested in his person. So, perhaps, the
qualities most needed among relations
in-law are consideration, kindliness,
and discreet tongue. If only we all
possessed these qualities what golden
age we should enter upon!-Christian at
Work