St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-12-18
LEARNING sTENoGRAPHY.

didn't realize that / was a remarkable
character until went to shorthand college,
then | couldn't shake OFF the feeling that
was not exactly like the other scholars. l
struggled long and painfully with the prob
lem and finally solvedit. 1t was not because
I was more accurate or rapid than the others,
but didn't chew gum. While that class of
forty-four female and two male jaws
wagged lin perfect harmony I felt
an outcast and stranger 1t
Was beautiful sight to see those jaws work
So steadily and evenly 1 am surprised that
some Yankee inventor has not put this per-
netual motion to good use: have studied
then. and think with little training we
could dispense with steam and electricity
and use. jaw power entirely. After 1 had
live and dream in shorthand. 1
attempted to write my sister let
ter in loug hand. one sentence of which read,
"a peas ov pie to et'' and the rest was about
as ineligible. About that time Charlie
asked me to go for drive; l demurely
answered, Upper case capital letter Ispace,
will space, be space, delighted space lower
case held down strike PERIOD and looked
up to find him with both eyes sticking out of
his head and looking as if he was prepared to
take to his heels if l opened my mouth again.
1t suddenly dawned upon me what must
have said and only my prompt explanation
| that Il thought | was typeWriting" pre-
vented him from thinking 1 needed
a straight jacket and keeper.
The next few weeks were Nightmares of lit
tie black letters. inkribbons and wild strug-
gle to spell by sound Ill shorthand and ao
cording to the dictionary in copying it, and
was beginning to doubt my sanity. when l
luckily awoke from my delrium TO find had
graduated.
My first position was with two lawyers. aud
after had written their first letter it was
| with the greatest difficulty that | prevented
them from falling on my neck and weep
ing tears of joy. They had employed
sixty-fve different stenographers, but
had finally given W all hopes of
punctuation in despair. except periods;
| Somehow periods seemed to be the strong
point of all sixty-fve. They had approached
the sixty-tifth with faint hope beaming in
| their mild blue eyes, and humbly asked her
| if she thought they could have question
mark added to their machine where
| upon she arose i'll her wrath and scorn-
fully remarking She hain't come there to be
| insulted,'' departed. They had also con-
cluded it was the unruly machine that
popular belief that lawyers are very gentle
and credulous creatures is the only way
can account for the way that office was be-
sieged by book agents and Sisters of Charity.
When they saw one coming they USED to
make a dive for the vault, generally up
setting inkstands, chairs and stenog-
rapher. if they impeded their headlong
flight, leaving me to pick myself up and po-
litely inform the visitor 1.-The gentlemen had
just stepped % out" l got used to that but
one day when they saw a fascinating female
with red curls and Grants Life under ner
aim approaching they shut themselves i'll
SO securely that was twelve hours finding
locksmith that could pick the combination.
The air in the vault was azure. resigned,
returned to my home and INDUCED i'll tit of
nervous prostration for month.
i
Then went into the Office of nice, elder
ly gentleman of sixty, who proposed to me
III week. L left, after telling him Il was
already supplied with century plant at
home, whom we called Grandpa" My
last position was with an impecuniOus
newspaper. | stuck to it until its death,
which occurred in three weeks, mad
was left minus position and salary, and all
l had to show for my work was bundle of
dHClCut uCW opdpClo. liz PiCtuICo LII lhCAl
were doubtless very fascinating TO
one who was well fed, but were
quite inadequate TO subdue the cray
ings of hunger. and my credit was get
ting poor, SO gave it up ana married Charlie.
1 advise other girls to try coal heavlng or
woodchopping; that is light WORK CO impaired
TO being a OBSERVATION-DISCLOSURES poets
license for coming words, but l consider
that the proper name for the female motive
powe OF typewriting machine.
i
I have since inquired as to the fate Of the
rest of my class; twenty-five are taking in
washing two have taken i'll husbands and
plain sewing, the two males sell crockery,
and some are really stenographers, mostly
looking for a job.
What L went through is not easily forgot
ten, and to this day find myself murmuring
to the baby, Capital d &, space
comma. M m m a, space, loves, space"
etc.. etc.