The progressive farmer. [volume] (Winston, N.C.) 1886-1904, 1892-05-31
Mai, Bilkins and His Wife " Make Up
lie Makes a Speech.
" Hello! Mr.. Editor"

He Makes a Speech.
"Hellol Mr.. Editor"
R.-"G!ad to hear from you, Maj.
BiIkins. How is Mrs. Bilkins?'
B.-"Oh! she is all right. She has
made up wi II me au' everything is
running along like a cyclone now"
R.-"How did you and Mrs. Bilkins
make up your quarrel?"
Bob! go off an drown yourself.
'Reckin I'm goin' to tell you? In the
good old way, of course"
R.-"How are politics now?"
B.-"BIamed if l know. I'm tryin'
to find out, but can't. What do you
reckin? made a political speech at a
barbecue the other day"
R.-"Of course you made a good
one."
B.-"I don't know. The woods was
full of caIamiti howIers. I'm blest if
you kin go anywhere without seein'
about a milyun calamiti howlers. They
called me out an I got up on the plat
form an hollered 'Hurrah for Cleve
land and tariff REFORM! Then / sed
'Hurrah fer free coinage of silver an
greenbacksr Them blamed calamiti
howlers sot there just like they were
tombstones. 1 sed, Boys, don't you
like Cleveland an tariff reforms? Some
of 'em sed they had been gittin' tariff
reform talk fer twenty years, but no
tariff reform, sed they wanted a change
of diet" Then they all LATED. Ilaffed
too. Then l asked them if they didn't
want free homage of silver an green
backs? Some of them sed they had
been wanting it for years, bu5 were
still wantin'. They had elected Demo
cratic majorities in Congress twice, but
each time somethin' had happened that
stopped prOceedin's along that line just
at the last moment. l then asked them
if they didn't want the revenue ap,
pealed. They sed they had elected
Democratic majorities twice in ten
years and paid 'em S., 900 year to knock
the stuffin' out of that, but they had
adjourned without doin' anything but
introduce some bills an somebody got
hold of 'em an stuck 'em in the pigeon
boxes. I believe that is what they
call EN-"
RI don't think you made much
of a speech. 1t seems that others done
the speech making and you asked qucs-
tons"
b" Yes, I did make a speech.
They sed they didn't want no political
clap trap; they wanted me to tell them
how to abolish national banks an get
more money in circulation an break
gup trusts an get better prices for corn,
tOn, tobacco, oats, and how to get
freight an Twin chances They
sed they would then give the tariff a
black eye. l blazed away an made
them a speech. 1 told them to do like
me an Betsy, quit votin' fer nonsense
an come down ter business. l told
'em ter vote fer the St. Louis platform
world without end, an they would get
what they are ightin' fer. told 'em
to drop senterment an vote fer their
homes an their families; to put bust
ness into politics. Then you oughter
seen them boiler an throw up their hats.
They sed 1 oughter to go Congress, but
I told them Betsy wouldn't consent.
She has heard about how the purity
girls send flowers to the members of
Congress, an she is just a little jealous.
Goodbye till we meet again"
THE TRANSPORTATION PLANK.
1t is now important that everybody,
and especially the members of the vari-
GUS organizations that were represented
at the St. Louis Conference, discuss the
platform.
The transportation plank is the only
one that has met with much opposition,
and this is like the objections once
urged against the Sub Treasury-very
weak.
There is nc longer my question
about the right for the government
control of railroads. The Supreme
Court has settled that matter more