The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1892-06-18

but military music.
Manager--"oh, give 'em the double
ouick-that's good enough. Puck.
THE EMERGENCY PROVIDED FOR.
Jennie--..But you can't support
wife on twelve dollars week, George"
George-"True. darling; but our firm
always raises its men to twelve dollars
and half when they get married. -
Puck.
HARD TO BELIEVE.
Keedick describing giant he had
'seen)-"He stood seven feet in his stock
ings."
Mrs. Keedick-ssNo you might Just
as we'll tell me he had three heads in his
hat."-Judge.
HARD NAN.
Nine. Albino-..That ossi6ed man is
awfuly quarrelsome.
Mr.. Skeletone--"Y You're right, my
dear. He has been the bone of conten-
ton around this museum about long
enough. New York Tribune.
FITTING ROLE.
First Actress" Why, haven't you
heard, dear9 I'm engaged for one of the
principal parts in Beauty and the
Beast. :"
Second Actress-tHow NIGEL And
who plays Beauty? "-London Tit Bits.
INHERITED REPRooF.
The Rsctor-s'My dear young lady, /
hope am mistaken, but thought saw
you talking during the sermon yester-
day."
Stray Lamb--"You certainly are mis-
taken, Doctor. Why never talk in my
sleepp'-Life.
TALKING SHOP.
tsDarling," said the young man,
"your eyes are like diamonds, your lips
like rubies, your teeth like pearls, your
hair like jet
George" she interrupted, 'sremem-
Der that you work in n jewelry store.
Don't talk shop. Washington Star.
HE WAS GLAD, THE BRUTE.
Caller-"Where is your little brothef,
Hiss Courte2" O.
Miss Courte-"Poor little Tommy is
sick abed."
Caller-"Tha Observation-Disclosures let
rs proceed to enjoy ourselves as we
have not done since his last iIdisposi-
ton. Yankee Blade.
TIE sILvERY LINING.
One of the stingiest men in New York
fell from "a streetcar and broke his leg
in two places.
"Are you hurt2' asked one of the
parties who came to his assistance.
"Not particle" replied the sufferer,
grinding his teeth in pain; ct pay a
doctor so much year. Texas Sift-
ings.
SHE WAS CIVIL.
Ambitious Mamma-"Edith, noticed
last night that Mr.. De Rich paid you
considerable attention. hope you
showed him a proper amount of civil
ty."
Ingenious Debutante-"Oh, yes,
mamma, did I'm sure he knows be
can have me foEthe asking" brooklyn
Life.
BOYS MEMORY.
MIR. Suburb-sI told you to go to the
sto:e this morning and get a rake, and
spend the day raking up the odds and
ends in the garden. Why didn'tyou do
it2'
Little Boy-'.I-I couldn't rake up
the garden"
"Why not2'
ell forgot to get Good
News.
MAKES x DIFFERENCE.
Mr.. Billus-"C hugwater, am having
a lightning rod put on my house. Do
you believe in lightning rods!"
Mr.. Chugwater-s'I haven't much
faith in them. But what kind of roof
has your house2"
"a tin roof" Y
"What kind of TIM"
"What difference does that maker
"All the difference in the world,
Bihus. If it's American tin it's pro-
fected already" Chicago Tribune.
PARALYzLNG ADJEcTIvEs.
Spacer ..Whatl The telegraph edi-
tors committed suicidel You can't
mean it! Why, just two hours ago he
sent up story about FIVE men being
killed out west, with a scare head be-
ginning; Horrible, Awful, Terrible
Disasterl'n
n Slug 0ne-aYes, that's just the mat
Ter, for when a story about ten men be-
fng killed came in half-hour later he
Ennldn,f fhink IL mn hinrrar adiarkiuaa