Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1892-02-13

lzed thar they had war only few years ago
in which so, OOO. 900 of men died. and that tbev
could call into the field tomorrow a. many SOL
diers as are numbered in all the armies OF the
world and have enough men left over 10 man
every ship that floats. Furthermore their
forces are now armed with the best modern
rifles and drilled by skilled French and Ger
man officers.
One interesting fact not widely known is that
the repeating" arm was invented as far back
as the reign Of Queen Elizabeth. In Ills .
breech-loading revolving cannon was produced
by an ingenius Britisher, which had chambers
Christians and square bullets for Turks.'
reproduction of it is to be shown by the
patent Office at the worlds fair.
Kobolds.
From the London Globe.
We do not know that any ono has ever gravely
claimed to have seen one. And yet there 10 no
doubt whatever that there are such beings.
Else who is it that wrenches off our shirt
buttons mislays our keys. makes our pen
splitter and ticklss us in inaccessible regions
OF our back when We want to look important?
II we could catch one VIC should pin him down,
classify him. put him under q glass case and
ask rude questions to his parentagc and
habits. But the kobolds have been spared this
last indignity. There are no specimens in the
Natural History Museum. There are some
the most ridiculously commonplace explana-
tons OF their pranks Have you never found,
when dressing in the morning, that everything
You don't want conspires to get into your way,
and everything you do want persists in getting
out Of iH Your razor jibs and notches your
chin; the soap splashes into your eye: your
tooth brush tumbles into the water Jug and you
have to dredge for it, and, finally your collar
stud breaks loose and rolls into limbo. You
hunt it wildly round and round tho room. and,
finally. run it to earth in the farthest corner
under the bed. Your wife will make irrelevant
remarks about late hours, and refer inconse-
quently to that horrid club. But she is quite
wrong. 1t is the kobolds.
And have you never carefully put letter
away in particular place, expecting to find i.
come back. have you never found that the let
ter had disappeared? Have you not gone
ravening about tho house. burrowing behind
book cases. prodding corners and overturning
furniture while your wife follows behind and
mildly deplores your untidy habits? Again she
is ludicrously wrong. 1t is the kobolds who
took that letter when you were not looking and
put 1t in your pocket, where it has been all the
time.
The kobolds love to make for you in the
morning when you are in a hurry to catch the
early train. They start by breaking q boot
lace, they hide your gloves and brush your hat
the wrong way, they blow out the match when
you try to light a cigarette and fasteu your coat
tails i'll the front door as you slam 1t behind
you. On the way to the station the ferruls Of
your umbrella catches in something. You stop
with q jerk and look down. 1t appears to be
only grating but it is really kobold. When
they have once decided to spend day with q
man he seldom gets rid Of them before he turns
into bed at night He is certain to lose his
temper before long, and then it 10 all up with
him. There is nothing that smuses them 30
much as a man in a temper. They get little
bits Of mud from passing hansoms and dab
them on his collar. They gather smuts from
the chimneys and smear them on his nose
where he can see them, but cannot localize
them; they collect little puffs Of wind from
street corners and blow his hat over area rail-
ings and into mud heaps: they twesk his neck
tie into grotesque shapes and drop his eye
glasses into the gutter. They dance invisibly
round him, pulling. pushing, poking, pinching,
prodding aud pelting him, and the madden he
grows the more they enjoy themselves
In the evening they are still at it. They spill
his wine on the tablecloth, and send the soup
down the wrong way; they fill his mouth with
fish bones they loosen the top Of tho pepper
castor, and empty its contents into his plate.
that it will not draw. His wife explains as he
sits putting and blowing at the mouthpiece,
that this wouldn't happen IL he cleaned his
pipes out regularly which 10 absurd; because
he was going to clean them all out tomorrow
Whatever he attempts, the kobolds are before
the chairs creak, and put hairs in his pen un til
he finally gives in and decides that the day is q
failure. And then he finds they have hidden
the corkscrew. They are humorous little
creatures, without much malice in them
The steady-gOing. methodical man they leave
alone-the man who cuts up paper into little
squares over night to wipe his razor on in the
morning and puts all his cab fares down in an
account book before going to bed. 1t is the
erratic. unsystematic fellow whom they attack,
the man who stuffs checks into chimney orna-
ments and does not fold up his night shirt in
the morning. The cold-blooded man, when
be misses ono train, buys paper and waits pa
tiently for the next; the kobolds leave him
alone. 1t is no fun pinching q man who won't
stamp and swear.
sionally; but not as men do. Women are
Injured to discomfort from the time when they
gather up their back hair let out the final
tuck in their skirts and claim to be seventeen.
A being who can stagger about all day on q
pair Of four-inch heels with her waist crushed
in Q whalebons frame, who can submit to have
her nose tickled by veil and her heels clogged
with petticoats, never losing her temper or
saying wicked word-such q being can afford
no sport for the kobolds. They would die of
ennni. But to man they are very real tor
ment. Not that they break his legs. gouge out
his eyes, or infiict any irreparable injury upon
him; but they are ct the bottom Of all those
petty worries and minor accidents which make
up the sum OF u miserable day.
The kobolds are invisible; unfeit by every
one but their victim. Our big trials, our
knock-down griefs, bad - they are, have gem
orally some dramatic interest in them, and in
sure sympathetic public. We, commonplace
persons as we doubtless are, could face q
dramatic emergency with credit; we could.
like Regulus. leave Rome and friends, Inter
obstantes catervas," for Carthage and the tor
turer, IT We know that the historian with his
note book was watching the proceedings. We
could brave the stage lightning, and plunge
of the practicable rock into the boiling tide
after the heroine, when the gallery boys are
holding their breath for the appreciat,ve
whistle. We could all be heroes with the lime
light on us But q man must be more or less
than human to spend q day with the kobolds
and keep his temper.
The Dear Girl's Watch.
From the Philadelph ia Press.
1t was dear girl who bought Q watch Of Q