The Vermont watchman. [volume] (Montpelier, Vt.) 1883-1911, 1892-09-21
Written for the Waterman.
The o. NJ. Club.
BY LILLIAN RYDER.

What sort of club is that? Why,
the Old Maids Club, to be sure. Why
not? Is there anything morally, socially,
or politically, wrong about it that you
lift your left eyebrow in that particu-
larly aggravating way and assume that
skeptical look as much as to say, " The
ideal" The idea indeed 1t was an idea,
and as we believe in them we have
adopted this one. 90" you say, 81
have no objections to woman's club,
as a rule, but one> composed solely of
nightmare withNs suggestion of tall,
angular, cross-grained females that are
of no earthly use. Deliver me-" Don't
worry, my dear sir, about ever falling
into our clutches, for we have no use
whatever for you. Now l appeal to
any fair-minded person to know if there
is any good reason why we old maids
should be looked upon as a superhuous
species of creation without which the
world would have gotten along Just as
with any of you, of Adam as an an
cestor, or, if we wish to be more mod
ern and scientific, trace our lineage in
the most approved Darwinian method
But about the club. There are seven
of us; and what good times we have as
we draw our chairs together every Sat
urday night and-but am going too
fast, let me tell you about it. We are
all of us workers; and by workers we
do not mean that worked, weary
class of toilers known as "society
women" nor is there one of us un-
fortunate enough to be obliged to make
shirts at ten cents per dozen in order to
keep soul and body together, and then
be expected to be sufficiently thankful
for having been born in this free and
mighty republic. AS whole we have
been very fortunate, and have managed
to get enough pleasure out of this
work-a-day world to sweeten the bitter
we have sometimes been obliged to
swallow, and, up to date, have been
able to keep our dispositions in a toler-
ably sweet condition. The acid will
of adversely become too uncomfortably
warm, one really has to roar up the
chimney for relief. AS individuals you
will become acquainted with us by de-
grees. Here comes the school-teacher.
Now, if you have any prejudice against
school. teachers as a class, just lay it
aside until you know this particular
one. If you think her ideas are bounded
on the North, South, East and West by
multiplication tables and grammatical
rules, if you expect her expressions to
be weighed and labelled before they
are uttered, a revised edition of your
opinions will be in order as soon as you
make her acquaintance. Two of us are
newspaper women. 1t is quite too late
in the day to enter into the pros and
cons of that occupation. And as for
our bright and particular star, the
Artist, what would become of us in
these grippy days, without her to adj.
minister doses of laughter far more eff
fective than quinine and other miser-
able stuff that the doctors give us.
Speaking of doctors, we have one.
know what you think upon that sub.
iect, and am not going to discuss the
matter at all with you; but for cool,
practical common sense, she rivals all
competitors. If you are given to day.
dreaming or poetic musings, don't ex'
pect sympathy from the doctor. Oul
Stenographer will recall to your mind
all those bright ana Wltty(D sayings
you have read about her personal
charms and bad spelling; but as she
not only handles with ease the most
difficult words of the Ell and lie combina'
tons, but possesses what she calls 8
copper-plate complexion, she cannot
belong to the newspaper class. That
makes six of us. AS for the seventh
the Oldest and plainest of us all, she il
at the present time obeying sense Of
duty by spending ten hours day with
an invalid aunt, who conscientiously
tries to live up to the doctrine tha
because thing affords us pleasure
we should deny ourselves its enjoy
ment, and only be thankful for afflic
tions-a theory to which Number Sever
most strenuously objects.
Literature, authors, politics, religion
what don't we talk about, from the lat
} est astronomical discovery down L