The sun. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1833-1916, 1892-05-04
Alasi He Is Unloved.

Alas! He is Unloved.
Here Is a young man who boasts OF his
| pretended insensibility to the tender pas
sion. as II it were something to be proud OF {:
lam 80 years OF age. earning about sl%oo year.
and have saved IN about $4,000 For some time past
my thoughts have turned toward marriage. but some.
how other having got into my head hatlo should
be the basis OF rage have hesitated to take that
step simply because cannot fall in love have tried
hard to So but as none those ecstac thrills which
from associatng with lady has sveT possessed
me- conclude that shall always be barren OF the ten
der passion toward any woman In fact. when look
back life cannot resurrect ore AFFAIR OF the
heart This in itself strange for the boyhood OF every
man. except mine. is filled with love Affairs
~ am told by many friends that two Young
ladies in love with and would jump at IN oner
OF marriage from me- would like to ask you what
would be my chances OF happy life H. with my In.
sensible nature should ask one OF these girls to
marry me. Would it be on a par with marriage In
which the strongest love was exhibited by the couple
When say that two young ladies' are in love with me.
there is particle OF egotsm in IT. 1t is SO stated in
order that with the facts OF this case you may better
determine your advice
II this young man were really as he de-
scrlbcs himself. he would he an abnormal
and despicabe specimen Of humanity. The
insenslbility to which he pretends is an
evidence CT masculine weakness and not
strength. II it had always existed in him.
he would he without the motive power
which drives men forward, incapable OF
generous motives. deficient In courage.
probably crafty and treacherous. aud IN
object OF justiflable suspicion among men
and contempt among women.
1t Is q bad sign when young man cannot
concentrate his affections. In very early
youth he may be in doubt as to whether he
loves any particular girl exclusively. 80
susceptible Is he to the attractions OF
charming women generally. his seniors no
less than those OF his own age; but when
all wrong with hmif he cannot fall in
love" by fixing his affections on an indi-
vidual girl. He is in an unfortunate state
indeed from the corruptness OF his life or
from some natural defect in his makeup.
II. then. our correspondent is in truth
what he assumes to be, he is a fellow to be
Stunned by every girl Of healthy impulses
and an uncontaminated heart. or course.
the "many friends" who tell him that two
young ladies are 80 much in love with him
that they would Jump at an offer Of mar
rage" from such source. are only guying
him. Girls do not jump or move In any
way to get possession Of heart which is
barren OF the tender passion" II they fall
In love with man who poses as such a
character, 1t Is because they are keen to
discern that he Is only shamming indiffer-
ence to feminine attractions. and that his
pretence to insensibility Is only the armor
he puts on to shield his real susceptibility.
young man meditating matrimony
whose thoughts are solely occupied with
himself and his own chances OF happiness
in married life. deserves no consideration
from us or anybody else, man or woman.
Whether lie Is happy or not is matter Of
no consequence. We are thinking only Of
the poor girl who might be cheated into
marrying fellow SO unmanly and 80 des-
titute OF the spirit which should animate
him rs a husband. The question Is not
whether he would be happy in marriage.
but whether she would be happy in joining
herself for life with one incapable OF con-
centrating his affections on anybody except
himself OF course. she would be the ono
sacrificed IL she gave herself to q creature
so selfish.
It Is nil nonsense about these two girls
being In love with our correspondent. II
1t he true that he "cannOt resurrect ono
affair OF the heart" the reason Is that he
could never get any girl to fall In love with
him; and TINT Is Il very sorry confession.
A young fellow who provokes love Is never
himself barren OF the tender passion"
He must be lovnb!e In order to win love.
Such monstrosity as our correspondent
describes himself to he could never kindle
that sentiment In the heart OF any woman.
Probably. however. he Is better than he
makes out and Is unfortunate rather than
unworthy. his inability to excite feminine
regard being due to some cause not more
to him than his overwoening
vanity and sclf-conceit. q falling for which
women are apt to have little liberation In
men. They like the fellows who foil In love
30 frankly that they forget all about them
selves and think only OF the charms OF their
charmers. The trouble with him. alas Is
that lie is unloved. not that he cannot love.