The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1892-04-22
PROFESSIONAL AMENITIES.
The Grievance of the Living Skelet,
and How 1t Was Received,

The Grievance of the Living Skeleton
and How 1t Was Received.
otis no USE" said the living skeleton
II have tried my best to adapt myself to
the eXigencies of life in this establishment,
but can't do it. No one in my position
could do it. l have worn myself to skin
and bone in countless efforts to make
things pleasant for my companions. |
have trained down seven ounces avoirdu-
pois per week to please the management.
and | have worn black tights, which are
very unbecoming to my form, because the
tattoOed lady wanted a neutral background
for her complexion. And what has been
my reward? Harsh words and cutting re-
marks and unfeeling illusions to Antinous
and the Apollo Belvedere. It's too muchr'
And the unhappy freak buried his face in
his hands and retired behind his walking
stick
That's what's the matter" said the
manager, with marked sarcasm. you re
too much. You weigh nearly a pound
more than the skeleton dude at Smithers',
with all his jewelry thrown in. You're
queerin the show"
"Whatw cried the living skeleton from
behind his stick. You dare to reproach
me with my weight when you know that
it is due to your meanness, your parsmony,
your vulgar, grasping nature! When,
three months ago wanted to get my hair
cut, didn't you order me not to do so, be-
cause you wanted me to play understudy
to the CircaSsian beauty during the dull
season? And didn't you make me let my
nails grow SO | could do the Wild Man of
Borneos turn when he had night off?
Didn't you''--
Cheese it," said the tattoocd lady.
you're making the fat woman shake half
the flesh offer Ter
Didn't tell you?" cried the manager.
shaking his fist excitedly at the walking
stick, from behind which came sounds as
of sobbing, that ducks hoodoo? He's
queered the show ever since he come. all
he'll keep on queerin it as long as he stays
Oh, if there was only more like him. No,
no more like him, but more of his kind
I'd rather have the fakinest skeleton in the
business than him. He'll bankrupt the
management He's worse'n the tortoise
boyr'
''Ingrate!' retorted the living skeleton.
Serpent! Reptile! Iscariot,'
'Close yer jaw or yer'll swallow yerself,"
before the necromancer's mirror.
BE silent, you link" retorted the liv-
ing skeleton. IF Darwin were only here"
What's the matter with the living skel-
eton:" asked the modern Samson kindly.
as he carefully pasted together the torn
edges of loo pound weight
Nothing" answered the tattooed Lady;
He's outer siGhti'
Cruel! Heartiess,'' came from behind
the walking stick
Where are you;" called the modern
Samson. Come ont and show yourself.
Don't be afraid. I won't let 'em crowd
you"
Il wouldn't mind it so much, said the
living skeleton as he appeared from his
place of hiding. IF they d give fellow a
shadow of show"
But you amt got no shadow" said the
tattoOed lady tauntingly, and we're the
show"
Hes not in it," interposed the wild
man.
I'm just as much part of the show as
any of you" said the living skeleton
I'm good deal more of it than some Of
you. In fact, l may say that | am the
framework of the establishment And he
drew himself up proudly.
Il 'clar Z goodness, Brudder Bones, yo'
meks me Taught" said the wild man. who
had once been very successful in the burnt
cork branch II his profession-was in fac;
a regular burnt corker.
Don't use the vernacular, Whiske-s.'
said the modern Samson cuttingly; lit
bad form. -
Sos yer friend, 90 retorted the wild mar
Hes not n fake, anyhow" said tn,
modern Samson
We'll, You are" replied the wild mar
with an oriental sheer. And wha.
more, you're a.
1t Is hard TO say what would have 70
lowed had not the fat woman. who h.
hitherto listened silently, said:
Gentlemen
The word restored the excited freaks t.
sense OF their social standing. and the,
at once retired TO their respective pla,
forms, after each had bowed profoundly t.
the fat woman
Then the audience came in from the
stage performance and the freaks took their
positions for the iecture-New York Even
ing Sun.
Cinnamon as an Authentic