The aegis & intelligencer. [volume] (Bel Air, Md.) 1864-1923, 1892-09-16
THE TABLES TURNED,

came toward Israel and Harriet.
My children ~ she cried.
THE TABLES TURNED.
| When Colonel Graham, of Posey
| county, Ind, left town Tor Trenton
yesterday he put in his pocket two of
the best imported cigars that he could
buy. The colonel is Il confirmed
cigarette smoker, but he always car
ries cigars for self protection when he
travels. Since he left Posey county
he has developed discriminating
nose for tobacco. A rank cigar makes
him more peevish than knees in his
trousers There are few smokers of
bad cigars who will not throw away
Il half burned stump to accept one of
the colonefs good cigars, with the
graceful apology that always goes
with it.
Why, do you know" said Colonel
Graham the other day, there are no
cigars in Indiana so rank as those
that are smoked in New Jersey. They
are the brand that will kill vegeta-
ton, and | always carry Il cigar or two
10 give away on the smoking car.
Why, it's enough to make man fret
full"
Colonel Graham's seat in the smok-
er was shared yesterday by a man
with no taste in tobacco. He shifted
contemptuously at the coloneIs ciga-
rette, and pulled contentedly at a
very bad cigar with dark, shiny
wrapper. Colonel Graham was grow
ing seasick. He threw away his ciga-
rette, and drawing a cigar from his
pocket said to the man beside him
Pardon me, sir, but may L trouble
you for light ~
'Sure, Mike replied the man, and
he handed Colonel Graham cigar
that had just been lighted. Colonel
Graham carefully lighted his own
cigar, and with apparent absentmind-
edness tossed the other out of the win
dow
''Well, I'll bel
Graham, II really wasn't thinking
cept one of my cigars and permit me
sentminG ed-at times
The man looked at the cigar the
colonel gave him and said:
Looks pretty good. Better'n mine,
| guess. pay three dollars hun
dred for mine"
THAT cigar cost twenty-five dollars
Il hundre |, and is pretty fair, / think, :"
replied the colonel.
Him." said the man as he bit the
end off Then he leaned over and
said
"Will you give me Il light now?'
| Colonel Graham offered his cigar
The man lighted his own from it with
chuckles of satisfaction. Then he
leaned back comfortably and tossed
Colonel Graham's cigar out of the
window.
''WhY, your
Don't" said the man. when l
think of the tariff on cigars l go into
Il trance, and I'm not responsible for
what | do. Let me offer you one of
my cigars" and he pulled out one of
the three dollar a hundred brand and
handed it to Colonel Graham.
why, your
Now, don't, say" interrupted the
man. ''This is my station, but you
can get light from the man in front.
Much obliged fol your smoke. Good
by and he was off the car.
Colonel Graham returned to New
York last night and announced that
his system was shattered. Hereafter
|
and smoke cigarettes.
SIZE WIS SHOT
Il had curious experience while
passing through New York. said Il
western lady TO some friends on the
beach at Newport. I'VE had taken
rooms at the Blk, and unfortun-
ately reached New York just in time
for an absolutely torrid hot wave.
As / had pressing need for few days
shopping | kept my husband and
brother in town for forty eight houls
to their great discomfort, and they
spent their evenings by the windows
of our sitting room in the lightest OF
attire, drinking iced drinks and try
ing to keep cool. Tie night before
we left town we retired rather late,
after the men had been solacing them
selves in their usual fashion.
at was SO hot that it was some
time before could sleep. and nst as
| was DOING off remembered that
had left my rings on the dressing table
near the sitting room door the windows
Of which were wide open on IL little iron
balcony. A good chance for robbers,
[ thought drowsily but was too lazy
to get up to put them in n safer place.
Late in the night | was aroused by
the report of n pistol, or what sound
ed like one, and my first impression
was that was shot, for was literally
thing that felt sure for the moment
was blood.
Henry | screamed, L have been
shot l am dying And | felt SO
strange and giddy that was sure my
end was approaching Take good
care of the children, | nlurmured
And, oh, Henry, promise Inc not to
marry that horrid Miss M-that
Won seem to admire so much y What
nonsense, En- y said my callous spouse
as he struck n light and turned on the
gas, you have been dreaming
But am wet with bloodm | ex-
claimed Indignantly, feeling that after
all he wasn't worthy of tender death
bed scene, and that | felt all right
again. BY Jove, you are moist he
said putting his hand on my shoulder,
but it is not blood, whatever it is.
Suddenly he gave he gave a great
OUTLAW of laughter and pointed to the
parlor, which was dimly lighted by
the gas jet in my room. Well, what
is it? don't see anything | put in
GROSSLY, for by this time felt through
ly upset.
"'Oh, it is too delicious he gasped.
You have been shot, you poor little
thing, but not by burglars; only by a
soda water bottle, and there on the
table, where he and my brother Harry
had left them, lay couple OF bottles
one pointing AZ straight for my bed
as if it had been aimed at ne. Henry
had cut the wires continuing the cork
of one of the bottles and had then con.
cluded not to open it, and | sup
pose the heat helped the effervescence,
for the force of the explosion carried
both cork and soda water across the
room, hitting me on the shoulder.
"Oh course you may imagine how
my two men enjoyed my shooting af-
fair, and what capital they have made
out of it"
4 SLIGHT MISUNDERSTAND
A Texas sheriff, with papers in a
| civil emit antarad tho house of an at