The morning news., 1892-03-27
BAB'S BRIGHT SPICE.
,ENT MAKES NO DIFFERENCE IN
HER LIVELY CHATTER

wonders Why the Collar rickles
Her So-The Story OF a Modern
rrou-Frou-A Woman Talks of Love.
When Pretty Woman Sleeps-Mrs.
VAnderbilt's Dreamy Couch Where
Lillian Russell Sleeps-Mrs. Lang
,ry's Chippendsle Bed-Litsle Rsso-
utlons for Us All.
CCoDyTight)
NEW YORK, March 26.-Ths cry for a
long time has been that woman was taking
che bread out of mans mouth by assuming
his occupations. It was said that she could
write as well as or better than he did: that
AZ a politician she was far above him; that
.s diplomat she would have settled the
Bsring sea trouble long ago; aud if ever
she got hold Of the money in the treasury
she would govern it in a way that would
plsase all the United States. But, after a
great deal Of thinking and when a woman
thinks she thinks hard enough 10 burst the
buttons off her frock) she has come to the
conclusion that there is a new occupation
open to man. It is that OF lady's maid.
And the reason for its existence Is what
habit; that is to say. that the masculine
shirt, pure and simple. has become a neces-
sty in the wardrobe of every woman.
WOMAN WITH A STIFF SHIRT.
ITS assumption, however, involves strug-
gle This is the way it all came about:
Lovely woman, who this year wishes to look
PARTICULARLY smart, and to have an air of
decided trlmness, goes to a shirtmaker. a
ri ehirtuaabar md
with a swegger, that she has come to be
measured for some shirts. Ten to one she
never had shirt on before. The whole
time that wretched man is measuring her
she tells him that those that she got In Lon
don were not fitted that way, and that they
measured her differently in Paris These
shirts are made exactly like those belonging
20 the head Of the family. with one ex-
ception; that Is, they have a string run in
the back, which pulls them into place: they
open down the front, have the cuffs and col.
lars regularly on them, and, altogether,
when they come home, look just as smart
as possible; and the shirtmaker, being of
this century, charges 81 so more for making
each. This is, presume, because it took
less material, and because they are for
woman.
A MAN AS A woMAN's MAID.
Now begins the occupation Of a man.
Madam has cloth skirt and a cuta way
coat to be worn with these shirts. The
shirt Is on, and the first thing heard from
her dressing room is a call for Charlie to
come and see what makes the collar tickle
So After Charlie has assured her that it is
because it is well starched, she lapses into
silence, Then she says in low and very
pleading voice: would you mind putting
the studs in for me?" He does not mind.
and after that he ties her scarf. sticks the
pin in the way it ought TO be, and then she
shows him the tab with her initials on It,
which she fastens to band on her skirt.
Charlie tells her he don't arrange his this
way. and rather SCOTS at her, but after
she is all dressed, and he sees her beautiful
deightin her shirt, that is really and truly
like mans, he will want TO accept the
position Of lady's maid Co every young
woman who has a really and rightly shirt
front.
FRoU-FRoU IN MODERN LIFE.
By the by, do you ever &c to funeralss
Generalzing, think it is wrong. As the
darkies say, one funeral makes many, But
the other day l was induced to 20 to one be-
cause KNEW the love storyof the woman who
lay there placidly asleep forever Her hus-
band bent over her and wept bitterly, and
all that could say to myself was that it
was remorse. But afterward | heard of
something that happened just before death
came into that house, and ii made me a
little gentle in my judgment OF the man.
You remember the story of Frou-Frou.
Well, there has been many a Frou- Frou
who lived and died in your time and mine,
and among them is the woman who went to
sleep only such little while ago. Her life
was curious one. When she was very
YOUNG SHE LIVED IN PARIS,
and there met young man; there was an
unfortunate story, duel of in the south
OF France. and a little baby's grave. When
the young girl came back to this country
no one, of course, knew anything about
this, and iu very short time a rich man
had asked her to be his wife. She went to
her mother asking of her that the story
might be told him, then If he wished to
marry her she was willing. The mother
promised that it should be-but it never
was. Two days after her marriage she said
something to her husband about it, and to
her horror discovered he knew nothing OF
It. so she told him, and from that day on he
never spoke to her.
Years came and went, she grew bitter,
tne world called her sarcastic, and never
supposed that any reason existed for the
cntti4g words she said, because, as they
claimed,
SHE had PLENTY OF MONEY,
handsome husband and beautiful home.
Ouo HlBub sue went TO see 'FrOu-FfOu," /"
and listening to the story as tod by the
greatest genius Of the day, there came to
her this thought: "If 1 speak to my hus-
band again, perhaps he might forgive me"
30 that night she went to his room, told
MIN how she felt. and pleaded that her
youth and ignorance might excuse her
crime; insisted on her great anxiety that he
should know it, and then, well he stopped
over, kissed her, and told her that the next
DAY they would begin life again, and begin
anew life-a life full of love and happiness.
She went back to her room, threw herself
on her bed, and in the morning when they
came to waken her, she was lying asleep
10 that sleep from which there was no
waxing. and on her face was the sweetest
OF smiles, SO that dead she looked as Young
as she did when she stood bride beside her
sweetheart.
A LITTLE WORD: IT Is LOVE.
People go and see plays and never think
lust what the result may be-; never think
Just whom in the audience a part Of the
pay may hit, and never know whether the
suect produced on some heart is going to be
,sstlng or not You think the man never
owed the woman3 tell you he did. Love
very queer thing in this world. There
are people who think they know what love
!, when all they know is affection, which.
py the by, is not bad thing, but to
ook for real. absolute, enduring
nVe, one must study a man. He is
apable of putting IN his heart and shutting
ySp from the eyes of everybody an intense
I'VE, keeping it there and bringing it out
Wnen required; and what he wants is to