The World. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1891-1896, 1892-01-20

Urr. newpsr - Btans - Usaaa.
-Whst have you rot thsrsf' qusrisd Mn.
Bowser, - her Hege lord made display -
: small packaes when be came homs The
other evening.
aMrs. Bowsef,h be replied, I'D you reaA
a. that case IN Troy whore barber cut .
customer slightly on the cheek and be died
a blood poisoning"
mo. Say. you've gone and got another
shaving outfitp'
.Anothers When did / ever have oneie
"You got one two or three years ago In
Detroit, and how did you come out with III
Mr.. Bowser, you do the most foolish things
o. any man ever heard Of In all my lifer'
II do, chr q II foolish for me to want TO
avoid blood poisoning BY shaving myself.
t0say nothing Of the enormous saving Of
money! Yes, did get an outfit In De-
troit, but I had q boil on my arm and
couldn't handle the razor"
.And you cut yourself and pranced
around and whooped until the neighbors
thought We had fire How much did
this outfit costf"
..Only ten dollars."
aTen dollars thrown right away
SIS til Let's sea about that. Having
my own outfit ! can shave daily. That's
70 cents a week, or -. 80 per month. Seems
TO me that "a per year IL worth saving. In
the twenty years l have been shaving
could have saved the trifie Of $3.50 Where
are you now, Mrs. Bowseri"
"Just where was before. You'll shave
,nce and that,ll end 1t.
xviii TT II that's your opinion have q
great surprise in store for you. I've been
taking lessons Of barber on how to handle
the razor, and can shave clean In exactly
four minutes. Easiest thing In the world
when you know how. Just think Of the
ESQ have thrown awayP'
"Well, suppose you'll try It in spite OF
anything that can say, but shall decline
to be held responsible for any trouble"
.Responsiblei TROUBLED How could !
hold you responsiblei And what trouble
can there bef"
"Why, that time In Detroit you almost
tore the house down because you cut your
ear"
"Poohi / was probably joking. Don't
remember thing about it."
After dinner Mr.. Bowser took bowl Of
hot water and started up stairs, saying 70
Mrs. Bowser az he went:
"Better time me by the clock. may be
SIX or seven minutes this time, but I'll be
rlgnt Oh LICK JOmOrTOW ulRnb.
Let's seep' he unused as he opened tn
box and stood before the glass. 1.-THE first
thing is to lather, Of course. That's as easy
As rolling of a log. This Is something like
comfort, this Is. Hanged IL don't believe
shall want to shave twice dayr
Mr. Bowser decided to put on plenty Of
iather He put it on his chin. cheeks, nose,
forehead, ears and throat, and more or less
fell on the carpet. When he had lathered
until both arms ached, and no more would
stick to him. he picked mp the razor and
chHckleds
Il just hold it with three fingers, this
way, and lay it on my cheek this way, and
move it gently down. A child three years
old could do that. I'll show Mrs. Bowser
a trick or two before I'm through. Good
woman, but she thinks she knows it all.
Razor just s1ides''--
Mr.. Bowser gave a jump and at the same
instant he saw the lather stained with
blood
Don't amount to anything the
head of pimpler' he whispered to him
self. Barber told me to keep my arm
stiff, and forgot. Can't expect to get the
hang of it in one minute, you know. A
little more lather."
He lathered away until it began to drop
of, and then picked up the razor again.
"Mr. Bowser, what's the natter" called
Mrs. Bowser as she kicked on tho door.
"Nothingr" he answered.
'Then what are you jumping around so
forf Thought you'd shake the chande-
lers down."
"The blamed thing must have slipped on
mei' he growled as he returned to the glass
to survey the cut. Probably didn't hold
it exactly right. Ali that's more like the
way the barber told me to hold it. Now,
then, take it easy till you get the hang of
it. May be ten minutes this time, but on
the next occasion Pip
"Mr Bowser, open this doorl" called
Mrs. Bowser from the hall.
wv what do you w-want?n he gasped.
4 want to know what all this swearing
and kicking over the chairs meansl Didn't
tell you how you would come outl''
"You go awayl Pm all right It was
the man next door you heard"
Mrs. Bowser heard yell and started for
the stairs She met Mr.. Bowser half way
up. The lather was flying about and the
blood streamed down on his shirt bosom,
and his eyes were as big as onions.
well, didn't say soS" she demanded
Her words brought Mr.. Bowser to him
self. He turned back, beckoned to her to
follow and rs they entered the bedroom he
silently pointed. The razor lay on the floor,
the bowl was broken in three pieces and
there was lather everywhere.
"Wella" she inquired, as she picked up
three towels and placed two chairs on their
legs again.
"Womanp' he hoarsely whispered, "this
is too much"
why, ,vhat have done?'
"Surel Done! Look at mel"
"Yes, but you tried to shave yourself"
but who dragged me into itf"
/ "Mr. Bowser, you certainly can't blame
me. told you before you"-
That's enough! This is the limit!
understand it all, and can see just how you
planned It'll 1t is not your fault that did
not cut my throat and that you are not
now widow Mrs. )Bowser, leave me to
myself have some papers to look over
before consulting il lawyer tomorroWp'-
NJ Quad in New York, World