The Daily bulletin. [volume] (Honolulu [Hawaii]) 1882-1895, 1892-04-06
A GENTLE HUmoRlsT,
Some stories of the Late \. Miner Gris-
void, "The Fat Contributors

II WIS ~ lllS vi Nlti W. W ~ ''''N'
latest humorist to leave us, y. Miner /
Griswo,d, was fond of quoting the re- .
mark in his serious moods. He had these
moods, for his hmnor, like all that rings
true, was ever on the border OF strict /
truth. Even the caricaturist to sue.
coed must keep close to nature, and my
dear friend Griswold was no caricatur.
list He was rather the gentle, great
hearted. kindly philosopher, who won
our laughter by pointing ont the in
herent ecceutricities OF things thnn
the cynic who exaggerates them.
"Miner" or Girls" as we used to love
to call him, was Il greas man. Not great
according to the standard by which the
world metes out its clumsy approval
but inherently great in that he hHd mas
tered a philosophy that was sufficient to
/ him. and was complete exponent of it,
| Generous beyond bounds, he was forever
| doing good. and satisfying himself com
! pletely with the consciousness of having
| done it, looking for nothing more, Low.
! ing by nature, he went ut times even to
excess in the good fellowship that too
often became conviviality. Clear head
ell. he controlled himself witha strength
of will that kept him within bounds
not the bounds of conventionality, but
those of his own good sense
This man, who was cherished friend
of a great many of the most distinguished
men of the last thirty years. was born in
obscurity, and ran away from homo
when only dozen years or so of age to
go to work on a canal boat. To tell the
story of his life would be like turning
kaleidoscope, for there was nothing like
consecutiveness in it, and the variety of
his experiences was bewildering. A
somber tragedy in his life made of him
broken hearted man in the prime of
life, and it was only after years of suffer
ing that he found peace and happiness in
his second marriage.
With the exception of that episode
his history was merely Il succession of
careless adventures full of merriment.
Something of the way he regarded the
serious matters Of life is shown by what
he said to Charley Stow when that gifted
genius luet him in Cincinnati. "What
are You doing here" asked Stow. Game
on collecting tour said Griswold,
"What luck?" Capital! Most success
ful trip ever made of the kind. Been
here three days. Collected hundred
and fifty dollars. Telegraphed to my
wife for fifty TO get home with, and just
got that"
In his early days he was always likely
to be broke" though he made great
sums by lecturing when "The Fat Con
tributor' was at the zenith of his fame
He used to tell with great glee of one
morning in Cleveland when he and a
boon companion found themselves PENN
less and breakfastless, with no credit
even for IA cocktail. They stood on the
corner in quandary, when suddenly
Artemus Ward, Il warm friend of both
of them, came along Browne (Artemus
Ward) was then very flush of money, as
they both knew, and they hailed him
joyously He stopped aud chatted pleas.
antly for II few minutes. paying no at
tention to theIg evident distress, and at
length Griswold told him plainly that
they We're both "busted" and hungry
"Ohv' said Browne talking very fast
and giving them no chance to interrupt,
I'm very sorry. Now I'll tell you what
you must do. Go to work right away
Start newspaper. You must be sure to
make it light and breezy III character
Beware of dullness. Don't attempt tc
be too serious. Make it breezy Make
it breezy. Good morning." And he
walked off rapidly, leaving his friends
almost stupefed.
1t was rather more cruel than Artemus
, Wards jokes were apt to be, and Girls
void would have been incapable of it.
though he never got over his apprecia
y, ton of the fun in it. He was fond oI
: practical jokes, but never at any one
else's expense. He always made hinselI
e the butt For instance, he used to tel
$ with great glee how he got himself ar
rested five times in one evening by diff
ferent policemen for the sake of being
taken to a station house where the
captain was n personal friend and wouiC
D not lock him up rs the charge was moth
l ing more serious than singing in the
u street. "Of course" he said, Il coult
4 not sing, but felt us though woulC
like to, and | tried The policeman
i could not be blamed"
$ Griswold was an inveterate punster
but this w.s excusable on the GROUND
that some of his puns We're witty, H
was in Detroit at the time of the Fenial
~ invasion of Canada, and crossed the rive
to Windsor and entered barroom
y where in spirit of pure fun he began t.
o sing IL Fenian song. 1t was dangerou
l. fun, for stalwart stranger, full of Can
d adian patriotism, suddenly presented
j. revolver at his head and exclaime,
sternly, "You can't sing that song il
Windsor Quick as "A flash Griswol,
replied, " | couldn't sing it if | was on
of wind, SORT
Is He and Artemus Ward in Cleyelan,
it played characteristic prank on teach
% er Of elocution who had just come to tn
q city to settle They called at Il. III
:. and rang his bell He came TO the doc
n in his nightshrt, and they pushed thei
~ way in ana told him they came to inter
, view HIM, The professor though dc
d lighted at the chance of notice, protest
J. ed that it was very late "Oh, we don
" mind that, " said GIiswold; 1--WE are use
l. to nightwork" And Browne 50 4
O "You are an elocutionist?" Yes.
h. We'll, then elocute." And before tn
y bewildered man knew what he wa
abOut ha was on a chair i'm his soant