New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1892-01-23
THE TALK or THE DAY

Tile headline editor has Ais troubles. OF whica
the world knows net The other day IN thico' on
man named Avery married 10 Miss shalL 'h~
the headline man OF The Chronicle pat over tio
account the heading Avery small Wedding bus
one OF those composite who know il ALL set II up'
4 Very small Wedding" and the groom IS now loos
ing for the editor with large-sil cId0'
THAT LANCER or ClIEELEE
Oh lie was the ranger of sr at Checlcc,
Most terrible 10 behold
lis lrown II w0ndersoine thins 10 se~
His ldble;s were lined with gold
And he swOrc by all tie snnts noiee
lie would lay Uncle sam out IOid
20 he eiried on his sw!simangoree
And bound lis COB on his bacA
And ne sailed him north In his did ,rce
Though the waves rose nieh and baca'
Till he came 10 the edge Of sans couHtl''
Aud hred od It's t-haci!ath'
Alas for tho Bangor Of high degree.
Alas for his Wis and enid.
Alas! for The t.-,desmen VINO trusted lie,
Now all di,trausht ard via
For rude Uncle sam most WthelIes
That Dangers cJan,enancc sp.led.
lie sank that elegant diIcorce
Close by tho GOden Gaze
And he punched that Bangor repeaedloo
And Knocked him ultimate.
And found him drunk and disoiderlee
And made him WORK On tH suate'
The gangerc,, mourneth in far Cheel,c.
And her babe wecps by her sidc,
And the ti:ldr>lllpli Won I lUfll>l EEuo iuE oho
TIL their bill, are satisfied
The hanger retulGeth ~ more, ana re
owed money on every she.
IL Io,hua jenkins in Minneapolis Tribune
"rhe Norfolk NaJ Landmark" thus attempts 70
correct a popular impression. There never WAS
Confederate ironciad or any other ironclad han'eo
Merr,mac The Confederate nam WAS the virginia
ALWAYS She WAS constructed upon The NUS OF an od
rnited state, frIsac called the Merrmac. Why people
.houId ., ON calling the Virginia the Mcrrmac we
cannot see, History and factnot always synonymous
or,e I'm TN, case. The Confederate lroncad was ths
virginia not the Mer!imac'
AWord Of Fncourag ,ment-Mr. Emerson Bean IN
vc,' I'VE written poetry Of course, but never h"o
tried to have ane Of il published. .,, ,,, so,t "a
f. some of the magazines. I've seen some rish'in
stun in them lltely.-tJescr
Simon Wolf eA-ConSul General Of the tnlted s'a'e'
at Cairo tells story rclaed 10 him 10y Arao fdo"'
Of n Moslcm priest who once asked all those Oh h'
congregation who loved tod ard feared their "N'7
in stand up Instantly" says the narrator uio
whole gathering rose save one When 'he pres.
observed this he approached the solitary exception anu
said: i see that You remain seated Is II oe'a"s,
Won do not love God" NO. answered the man. !
love God erhcn Is IL because you do not rear !ow
wife, or the contrary was the reply, i was Wao''
TO rise because my wife gave m such beating w,
morning tina: | almost hclpi-'s' Now he'0'
concluded AraDi 'MlS Il lNsll III INC WY PN
Ecypt TO day with her back still sore from the srpo'
laid uuon her by the nations which are bidding hes
rejoice"
The late Sir Thomas Chambers was not NH s hs
lunghtcr seldom entered the court over "ll'n -
presided So sOlcmnN There IS nc" Ner' ohc -,
Story It'd OF him in the Temple 1t Is ,o inc ire
that u prisoner who was rndefended, pleaded gi',
and counsel having been Instructed 10 delhd nili a.
tho last moment, withdrew the pea any the iury
acquitted him In d.chareng the prisoner SIR !houns
is said to have remarked: Prisoner. l do not ee's
your fesn I'm Y YOUR hay c" found that you are
linr.'-(London star.
loss says writer in Blackwood.' " so iar iN'n
beinc. MS J. among others, always imaSlheu'
Chinese word Is merely the miSpronuncatlon OF wv
spanish Dlos. God. The discovery OF this fell he'"v
upon me. II reduced my knowledge OF Cbhese h'"-
two words to one but have learned severn s'',oe,
but bill not write them here. as do not kiio" va
they mean. A. and the writer both started WIZ, ,,s
determination of studying Chinese, and the "ncr ~
A. buy ia grammar; but discovering thar the sinSio
letter Ind I45 WAYS OF being pronounced. anu th''
each pronunciation had an entirely different me"p"s
we said that there was no poetry about inc ..". ~
language, that 1t was not worth learning III" "
grammar was secretly consigned to the river mua W
being dropped overheard
So lie was"I thought you advertised tla tS,a NV
selling ont az cost srowled the aclage OF
ing down the required - cents for snaii Ps0""s "
notepaper ,,.,,, .That's
:. Yes sir- replied the statcner brskN. Wans
right We referred TO or postage stamps
any !"(Chicago Tribune.
4 Georgia editor who challenged to nght "u'S
writes: THE business OF the year mas hot o'." 49,,
rs to warrant 10 proceed further IN the n'a'' An.
~ our adversary will furnish us with free pass 10 '
dueng grounds and lemunerac us for the ""'' W.
we'll fight him. But hanged II we'll walk there'
A Direr,ncc.-Anxlous wlfe-what Is his aime""
doctor! ,..,
Thysicinn-l pronounce il paresis, madam. AN, an
Boston Sick Man lfcebly)-Aceordins .o-tcsrrn n -
thorues, you-don't pronounce t1correcyryys. ,,a
cent-ls on the-hrst syllable.-(Chieego Irloun@