St. Paul daily globe. [volume] (Saint Paul, Minn.) 1884-1896, 1892-07-22

most honored "pard." Q think that is the
popular term in the West)
ALBERT EDWARD, Prince of Wales.
T, 81 almost forgot to say that mamma
can't come either. She didn't say why, but
she can't. Sorry. WALES.
THE NEXT PRESIDENT.
BUZzARD's BAY. July u. 1S92.-It is with
feelings of regret that 1 write this letter an
nouncing my inability to be with you this
evening but understand you have tobog-
gan slide at Wildwood, and, as l struck one
OF those things about four years ago, have
learned to keep away from them.
1our tarlf-adultS 10 cents. no extra charge
Tor children-meets my views exactly
think every one who rides on your road will
revenue only. and, of course, they will vote
the Democratic ticket.
The boys took me by surprise last night
and told me of my nomination. The sur
prise was complete, as l had no idea that
anything of the kind had been going on. If
you have as many people at Wildwood to-
night as were assembled last night in New
York to hear me listen to the news of my
nomination, you may put me down for
block of stock. know good thing even if
don't see it.. Yours eXpectantly.
GROVER CLEVELAND.
FROM GRANDPA's HAT
WHITE HOUSE, July II, 1S92.-Messrs Stone
d Morton: | read with pleasure the invita-
tiol W ue VIII you on tne cetoDratlOD OF the
opening of your new road. and it is with
great regret that feel it incumbent on nv
self to decline. am not in the habit of de-
Ginning anything, but even presidents have
their exceptions.
note. with interest that your road was
Dulit under the protecting wings of the Nc
Klnley bill, and l feel sure it will prosper.
The duty on electricity is as high as we can
TINS hH shS sSss ySa M Ss
your votes. That is ''reciprocity'' i'll the most
approved form. Should either Of you come
to washington this summer, call OH the
you to Wanarnaker. He is from Philadelphia.
and is pretty good fellow. though he will
talk shop" He'll show you the sights.
Remember me to Joe Wheelock. Sincerely.
BEN HARRISON.
Straight From Spain.
THE PALACE, MADRID, Spain. July 81, 1892.
L. M. Hastings, Chairman, ETC.: We regret
exceedingly our inability to accept the kind
INVITATION extended US to be present ut the
reception rendered 20 those enterprising gem
tIemen. Messrs. Stone & Morton,at Wildwood,
this evening. We have heard of that luxurlous
toboggan trip and long to glide The slide.
we are informed that it is the greatest thing
on earth, and long to plunge from its dizzy
nelghts into the pure waters of White Bear.
Do the bears also use the slide, and are they
whites Could you inouce Stone and Morton
10 come to Spain and build us one? Without
1t we are mot in it, Tender my regrets and
pesl WISHES. ALPHONSO, Regent.
Scandals SORROW.
STOCKHOLM Sweden The Royal Palace
June Il. lS92.-L. NJ. Hastingss Chairman.
Etc: We had expected to have availed our
self of your thoughtful invitrtion to be pres
ent at the grand reception given those hon
orable gentlemen. Messrs. Stone Il Norton
who have done such good things for the
metropolis of St Paul and Wildwood: but at
the last moment we found we could not make
connection with the ST. Paul & Wildwood
1ast express, owing to the fact of our invi-
tation being one day late. The children, OF
whom we have seventeen, had all been provid-
ed with suits in which to enjoy the toboggan
silde. and their disappointment Is great. l
nave had TO promise to go over later on, at
which time hope to have the pleasure of
the company of my friend knute, who, 1 be
i!eve, is trying TO acquire residence near
Wildwood.
terprising gentlemen, in which all Stockholm
JOINS OSCAR IL.
King OF Sweden and Norway.
NO WALL HERE.
The IMPERIAL PALACE, PEKIN, CHINA
Fiftieth Span of TIme.-To Stone & Morton
ana others: kwang Su the Son of Heaven
and Emperor of China, by his Celestial en-
voy, sends greetings:
Oh, alas imperial heaven is not the world
afflicted by extraordinary changes? The
wise men of your honorable nation exclude
my people from your bountiful country one
day, and the next your beneicent citizens
wouio entertain my sovereign body. 1t is
now impossible for me to eat or sleep with
compOsure. The invitation CONVEYS great
JOY 10 my celestial soul. 1 tremble with
pleasure and am scorched with grief at my
disappointment.
[Signed] KwANG SU.
BY ONE LUNG. Secretary of the Imperial
Dynasty of China.
AROSE FROM THE DEAD
July 81, 1S92-Citizen Stone and President
Morton: If you had enclosed a pass with
your invitation might be with you. but it is
so long since discovered anything that am
rather. hard up. It's a good long
way from where I am to where you
are, and it is pretty hot, here
for travelling. Then. too Ferdinand and
Isabella are here. and are little put out that
you didn't ask them, as they gave me the
ship in which discovered Wildwood If |
went alone they might think l was going to
discover something and not let them in on
the deal: and you know how that is yourself
Regards to Bill Leip; remember him WELL
Yours for 400 years. c. COLUMBUS.
FROM THE sERAGLIo.
,CoNsTANTINOPLE, July21, 92.-The Sultan
of all the Turkies, to Pashas Stone L. Morton.
greeting: expected to come, but the Car
of all the Russias is after my JOB; wants it in
the worst way. and l can't afford to leave.
Besides, I'm in trouble in the harem.
All the eunuchs have formed a union
aud have gone on Strike, and as
result the ladies are running up bills at every
shop in town. I've had to exact few pres
ents from the faithful in consequence, and
my heart bleeds as think of the sacrifices
they may have to make to keep me good
natured. If the cZar sits down too hard on a
can of dynamite and the harem goes non
union will try aud run over next week. |
Dejectedly yours HARoUN AL FREsCo
FORGOT HIS OTHER NAME.
TEHERAN July 81, 1S92-The shah of Per |
sia regrets that he is unable to join in the !
general outburst of dimes that fill the pock-
cts OF those two distinguished American !
financiers, Lalla Stone and Rookh Morton, |
but the recent spots on the sun have |
occasioned him much concern, and |
his daily worship is interfered with, |
making it impossible for him
to leave. If some one would kindly knock !
the spots off the sun he would be glad to |
join in the general celebration of a road run |
by fire lightning. If the road is profitable !
his Shahlets firmly believes that Lalla Stone |
and Rookh Morton will become fire worship !;
pers from sense of duty, and he suggests |!
that they send pass to Zoroaster to let him |
see how fire lightning is worshipped al Wild |
wood. kuggedly thine, SHAH
He REMEMBERED.
DULUTH, July H.-Lane *. Stone and Wal
ter 5 Morton, care II. C. Lewis, ST. PAUL: