Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-08-04
UP TO ms MOTTO.

SIZE WAS TAUIOLO1ACALs
81 told you yesterday 1 would MOI
marry you," said she.
~ know it," said he. "That is why
/ ask you again to-day. You would not
be so lacking in originality, hope, al
to repeat to-day what you said yester.
day. - Harper's Bazaar.
IT Is IN THE FUTURE.
Hello, Ricketts,, when is your
marriage to Miss Mum coming off,
Ricket.s-It has been indefinitely post
poned.
whats the troubleg'
''Oh, she married another fellow.n
FOOLISH.
Shell think girl is very foolish tc
marry poor man.
He (piqued) Indeed she is; but not
half so foolish as another person whom
might name. u
She-Whom9
He-The poor man who marries that
sors of girl.-[New York Herald.
OUT IN THE WIDE WORLD.
Hostess-What has become of Sandy
Smith, who stood so high in your
class!
.Alumnus-Oh, he's taken orders.
Hostess--He's in the ministry, then2
Alumnus-No; in a restaurant
brooklyn Life.
ALL THAT WAS LEFT.
He sat on a can of dynamite,
Oh, horrible disaster!
They could not find of him one mite,
But they buried the porous plaster.
Judge.
WEE WOMAN.
Little Daughter-Mamma, I wish you
Kould get me a--a-a-
Mamma--Well, whatl
Little Daughter-Oh, / don't know
most anything Susie Stuckupp hasn't got.
--[Good News.
FAMILIAR WITH BANQUETs.
Caterer-Have you finished that bill OF
fare for the Millionaire Club banquet
Assistant--Nearly. What shall end
with.
Caterer (wearily)-Cigars and--and
chestnuts. 81 New York Weekly.
PICNIC LEMONADE.
Corydon (at the picnic)-Let me get
you glass of lemonade, dearest.
Phyllis (blushingly)--Lemons do not
Rgree with me.
Corydon (brightly)-Oh, but there
isn't enough of lemon in this to do you
any harm. New York Press.
LIKE THEIR PREDECESSORS.
Snodgrass There is one serious trou-
BILE with the new silver coins.
Snively-What is it2
Snodgrass--I can't get enough of
them.
oPERATIC.
"Well, Tompkins, how do you like the
operaS"
''Not very much-it's kind of old and
musty."
Eyes. A little fresh air wouldn't hurt
it, Harper's Bazaar.
A FAvoRITE.
Father-Why haven't you been pro-
noted to the higher grade long before
this2
Little TOMMY guess it's cause tn
teacher I've had so long doesn't want to
lose me.
KNEW HER BROTHER.
Sister-I don't think that girl you're
engaged to is very pretty.
Brother-She is beautiful when she
smiles. ''@'-
Sister-Yes, but she won't do much
smiling after she marries you.- New
York Weekly. sa.F
AFTER.
When the party is past and he's home
and in bed
The youth his bright faculties rallies,
And he then clearly sees what he o,lght
TO have said,
And is full OF the wittiest sallies.
Il New York Press.
CHANCE FOR HIM. Us
Mr.. Saphead (confdentially) = And
you really think l may be able to win
your sister2
Susie-I guess so. Since / got my
growth am taller than she is, and now
she's got to marry or wear my old
dresses.
RATHER HEARTLEss.
Little Dick - School-teachcrs hasn't
any feelin's at all.
Mamma-What is the matter now2
Little Dick My teacher borrowed
my new knife to sharpen her pencil, so
she could give me demerit mark.
-fGood News.
COLLEGE STUDENTS HARD FATE.
Classicus-- What is the matter2 You
look terribly blue.
Centerush--Yes2 Just got the returns
of my exam.
Classicus- Pluclced7
Centerush--No. Got through, and I
must now give up my place in the eleven
and pass into oblivion.-[Once Week.
WENT FOR A DRIVE.
Husband What's that9 Been shop
ping, and bought $500 worth of silksg
You said you were going for drive.
Wife--Yes. Cash & Co. advertised
great drive In dry goods. New York
Weekly.