Martinsburg herald. [volume] (Martinsburg, W. Va.) 1881-1920, 1892-09-03
PITIL AND POINT.
A guard of Observation-Disclosures.

=
A drive well-The sprinkling wagon.
A hard struggle for bread-The young
housewives first venture.
You generally get fresh breeze from
the salt ater.-Cape Cod Item.
Latin will never be dead language
until all the lawyers are killed Off
Puck.
Presence Of mind is sometimes indi-
Gated by absence of conversation.
Washington Star.
Unconscious Wisdom; sis your father
a musician2' "No, indeed, he writes
operas. '-Elmira Gazette.
Father--"What are you practising
with my daughter nova" Music Master
-"Patience. boston Globe.
Modest bearing is very com nendlble
in a mau, bat it is no recommendation
to fruit tree. Lowell Courier.
Jagsoa says success is highly de.
veloped talent for getting yourself over
estimated .-Binghamton Gazette.
In the mena9eric world giraffes are
becoming scarce. The animal offers too
many chances to fate to get hit in the
ncck.--Ninneapolis Journal.
1t isn't until a man gets to be reason
ably rich that other people come to him
and tell him how he eau make lot of
money.-Somerville Journal.
People who imagine the average mes
senger boy can do nothing quick will be
surprised to learn that oae has been dis
covered fast asleep. Statesman.
"Was your dog well treated at the
bench show2" az should say be was.
He had one OF the judges calves for
lunch yesterday. "-Brookiyn Life.
Jack Sprnt could eat no fat,
His vile could eat no lean.
AMI as twas ru 10 to scraps the dish
They made a compromise on fish
New York Herald.
Binks-''What do you suppose two
such odd people as Mr.. aud Mrs. Scrap
pie are ever got married for2" Jinks-
"To get even, presume. detroit Free
Press.
Fannigle-''Did yoa ever suffer on
the railroad anything like sickness2"
Mullix-"Well-er-l remember once in
the west having to throw up my hands!'
Boston News.
az am innocent, your honor. Heaven
is my witness" 'I am sorry" returned
the sympathetic Justice. "Your witness
is beyond the jurisdiction of the court,
Five years. '-Harper's Bazaar.
Mr. Hilow--"What dc you mean by
saying these sapphircs are Milky"
Jewelcr-"No otTcuse, SIT, certainly.
They are of the beautiful azure hue Of
New York milk. Jewellers Weekly.
Farmer-"what arc yoa doing up
that tree7' Waiting for the
owner of it." "Wcl, I'm the owner.
What do you waut7' az want to know
if paregoric goes with these stomach
ache apples. Texas Siftiugs.
"No," said Fogg, when his phv,iciaa
told him that his blood was in an impover.
ished condition and needed to be started
up; "No, doctor, cannot permit il, it
would be wrong for us to stir UP bad
blood. boston Transcript.
Jack-"lIow is it you keep in such
good spirits all the timei" Harrv---'I
think how miserable should be if [ had
the toothache." Jack-"What DO voa
do when you have tho toothachc'"
Harry-"Think how happy should be-
If hadn't. '-Gencral Manager.
He rides bike at lightning rate.
He's won a racing cup;
lie hangs on bars and swings n weight
10 work his muscle; M.
Whom sickness starts unon ''bust
And takes the weak, st FIRST
Why is it that the athletes lust
The man who gets It worst2
Pick Ne Up.
The boy had been sitting for three
hours watching the boz on his iish.liue
when the man cane along. "What aIs
you doing therc:" said the maa. ''Fisi,-
in, said the boy. Got anythine2"
said the man. Yep" said the hoy.
WHAT said the man. Patience"
said the boy, and the man offered him -
week to come down to the rsl!:o..d
ticket office and answer qucstioas.-Dc.
troit Free Press.