The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1892-07-22

and Eve, and without shadder OF a
doubt it will continue, more or less, as
| long as the world stands. OF course a
man amt apt to acknowledge that he
is ruled by woman, and they seem to
think because they were created before
| her that they are about twice as much
consequence amt referin' to Beuja-
min-but dear SUI, l never thought ii
wuz much of fe ather in their caps.
Accordin' to the Bible, the animals
and sech like wuz made and then man
was created superior bein' 'over them
creeters. Then there being still great
chance for improvement woman wuz
made last, and wuz SO nigh perfection
there wuzn't ever nothin' made to out
do her. To be sure curiosity wuZ a
great drawb back, but have always felt
that Eve wuz SO pestered by Adam a
wonderin' and guessin' and a hangin'
round that tree, that she jest tasted OF
the apple to satisfy him as much as her
self There wuZn't nothing selfish
about her, for accordin' to all accounts
she gave him the biggest half and all
the core Of course he laid ittai to her
and she WIZ honest enough to'own up,
and ] suppose took most all the blame
| sartinly think if any one talnt is
hereditary, it's curiosity. It's handed
down from one generation to the. other.
/ recollect Jedediah Bumpus heard a
noise in his cellar one night and heiwuz
dretful curious to know what it wuz,
but, like Adam, didn't jest like to
venture himself, so finally he lit the
candle, and says he to his wife: Come,
Hannah, you go down cellar and I'll
hold the light. Don't be scared, for
I'm rite here" Howsumever, when
Hannah drove an old stray cat a hfssin'
and spittin' up them stairs, Jedediah
dropped the candle and departed for the
bedroom considerable lively, scared
nigh out of his senses. hain't no call
to tell folks his senses wasn't anything
to boast on, and as / don't believe in
sayin' spiteful things of anybody,
shan't mention the fact.
Now my other half is dretful GU
rious man, but he amt no hand to
sneak out of difficulty and lay it on
his wife. The fact is, Benjamin's worst
fault is careleSsneSS, and | have had
dretful hard work to break him of it.
It amt my way to fuss and scold.
believe in keepin' calm and infuencin'
folks.
Wall, meditated quite spell, and
at last l decided on way of breakin'
him of his needless ways. Of course l
consulted Benjamin first; l always do,
and think every wife should show her
husband respect in that matter. It's a
dretful good idea if you want to have
your own way, for naturally your other
half will be pleased to think you have
such high opinion of him and will most
always show his appreciation by tellin'
you to do jest as you think best.
Wall as usual, my other half con-
sented to my plan, which was as fol-
lows: Everything which wuz layin'
round, instead of bein' put away should
be carried to the attic in certain
place and he wuz to find them without
my help. For a day or tew, everything
wuz hung up. | wuz beginnin' to think
/ shouldn't have no use for that empty
flour barrel | had carried upstairs, but
lawful heart, before I knew it / was
Cettin' leg weary, runnin' up and down
with things. He didn't ask no queS-
tions, but would frequently come down
from the attic with his over-halls or
slippers, sorter smilin' like. and he re-
marked onct twas kinder handy to
know jest where to go.
Wall, all run on peaceful till one Sun
day mornin' he wuz dressin' fer church,
and his best vest WIZ missin'. He
looked for quite,a spell, finally says he:
"Huldah, seen my vest?'
looked up, sorter Iaughin' and says
l: yes"
Hang it all" SAYS Benjamin, 81 for
got that pesky attic"
Wall, l declare if my other half
wuzn't little riled when he come
down brushin' off the -four and
smoothin' out some wrinkles. Says he:
Il callierlate can't afford to buy good
clothes to have 'em all damned up in a
barrel when there is room for 'em down
stairs"
kept calm and told him if he wuz
tired of goin' upstairs / wouldn't make
him any more sech trouble. He imme-
diately became quiet. I thought it
wuznt any use to tell him ] wuz Jest
tuckered out myself a trapesin' up
there so often. After that | decided to
to wait spell and things run on the
old way quite awhile. ! used to pile
EN- up in u chair at the table, but dear
SUI, it wuz an easy matter for him to
lift EN- out into another one.
Wall, one mornin' he went out, and
calkerlate the scttin'-room and kitchen
looked like an old curiosity shop, only
more SO. | stood right still few min
utes, meditatin'. After due considera-
ton placed his rubber boots one each
side the settin'-room stove, arrangin'
some cat-'o-nine-tails and ferns in 'em
The effect wuz full as pleasin' to the
eye as gilded shovel hung onto the
wall, or pigs trough upholstered in
plush for 4 foot stool then pro-
ceeded to the kitchen and drove about
tcw dozen tackS into the wall TO hang
things on, There was the boot brush.
milestone, slippers, hammer, hat, ak
handle and SO forth; sufficient to cover
one side Of the wall One or two folks
came in that mornin' and asked if wuz
keepin' 4 secondhand store. told EN-
WIZ jest maxim things convenient for
Benjamin.
To say that be wuz dumfunnered
when he arriv home don't begin to ex-
press IL
"Heavings and airth, Euldah," SAYS
he. ''oe you cleanin' house?"
oh no." saws /. Only pickin' up