St. Paul daily globe., 1892-06-17
Disciples Of Salen Demon
strate the Ownership Of
AppetiteS
And Good Digestive Powers
by Performance at the
Table.
Long Courses Relieved by
Bright and Witty Foren-
sic Efforts.
The Merry Doctors Prove
They Can OPate as Well
as Prescribe.


viviality. The toasts we're appropriate
and the responses were embellIShed
with wit and apt aXiOmS, usually origi-
nal.
1t was nearly 10 o'clock when the doe
tors took seats at the ''feStlye board"
and little neck clans were served, and
consequently il was considerably past
midnight when the cnhcl nslon OF the
festivities had been reached.
II is no matter of surprise, especially
TO those who are familiar with his attrl-
buteS, such as especially fit him for the
functions, that Df. Alexander J. Stone,
of this -citv, was chosen t0aStmaSter by
common consent. 1t was natural
sequence. and he did the honOrs with
that innate grace aud happy facility
that lends a certain indeScribable charm
to the banquet board. Dr. William
Davis. the president of the society.
called the aSSemblage to order III the
middle of the menu. In his happy style
he extended a cordial welcome on the
part OF the medical society of Ramsey
county TO the guests. lie explained that
owing To the laIeneSS of the hour. taken
in connection with the length OF the Dill
OF fare, it had been concluded wise to
sandwich speeches between the courses,
The applause was terrific and pro
Ionged, and the popular doctor waving
his friends and admirers 10 silence,
suggested that You had better
save a little of that for what
Is to come" He then said that he re-
GREETED sincerely that it was his duty
TO open the exercises with apologies.
The names of two of the most eloquent
speakers had been omitted from the
programme. and one OF the speakers
that was down was not present, etc.
He then introduced Mayor Wright, WHO
said he WAS heartily glad of the limo
walton that the master of ceremonies
had decided upon, that OF mixing mp
matters somewhat and have the
speeches as interiudes IN the Succulent
the dinner Would hot have been spoiled
by his speech, he mOdeStly qualified,
and he then promised to make the
speech so very short that it could pOSSl-
blY do but little damage to the other half.
The toast TO which he was assigned TO
respond was ''St. Peter Not Robbed TO
Pay Paul" The mayor maintained that
there had been some mistake some
where. The proposition involved was
Dot true. and to prove the position he
went away back into the earlier period
OF MjnneSota'S romantic and dramatic
history. and then recited the exciting
incidents and struggles that Illustrated
the famous session of the legislature
when the stalwart effort budGed
almost into fruitiOn - the scheme
to remove the capitol to ST. Peter. 1t
remained for the half-breed, Rolette, to
steal the bill that was pending and car
" it away 10 some hidden retreat until
the session had expired by constitution
al limitation. This, the mayor said, in
face of the fact that the majority Of the
legislature stood ready to
Pass the Measure.
was surely ro5bing St. Peter to pay st.
Paul. Therefore he could hot consist
emily stick to his text. He however
gave most cordial welcome to the
guests to the city. He felt that the city
cannot afford to be more cordial to any
than to the medical society. When
younger his father had sent him as
student to DR.. Stone, and he submitted
that he knew something of the tricks
and maueuyers OF the doctors. How
ever, he had never prescribed for any
one except himself. and he felt that his
present excellent health was directly
owing TO his inherent constitutional
strength
Next was introduced DR.. Park Ritehie.
Els toast was: 'Maidens, Wives and
Mothers" and Dr. Stone added face
tiOusly the widows. and lie perpetrated
p few jokes that were home thruStS in
departing from tie printed programme
in this respect. DR.. Ritchie confessed
frankly that he seldom had been placed
in such uncomfortable position, and
he said that his feelings were best eX-
pressed in the words of the popular
song of the day, which reads:
There are moments when I'd
like to be alone
And the answer is:
And this is one of them"
This Wit met with hearty erecogni-
ton among the merry doctors. Dr.
Ritrhie SOlemnly suggested that he had
probably been selected to answer to this
peculiar toast because of the fact that
be was totally unfamiliar with the
theme ana he asserted that 10 one ever
suspected him of being maiden, nor
was he then nor would. nor could he
ever be wife nor a mother.
But philosOphically he supposed he
must take the dilemma by the horns
and make the best of the situation he
could. He reverted to one of the men,
Dlable incidents of his youthful and ex-
hberant career to his first sweetheart.
She was maiden, aid he had thought
Eer an angel, and had any young fellow
dared TO have doubted the idea that
wings were not actually sprouting, the
Hoctor ayerred that he would have
bummarily paralyZed the skeptic.
She has now had time to have
become a mother and even
E grandmother, pursued the witty doc
tor, seemingly determined to cover each
subdivision and proposition involved in
his peculiar toast. a good wife, he con-
tinued, is Gods best gift, but the bad
wife is the devils right bower. In
treating of motherhood he deprecated
tie conditions exposed by the health
Office reports, of the births among the
Olsons. the HansOns and other for
eign families. but the absence
names, Smiths, Jones' and Browns.
The EngliSh-speaking mothers are
nyerse 10 raising children. He clio sed
his talk with
Standing Toast
frOm-the "school for scandal"
''dere's to the Maiden OF Bashful Fiji
teen, etc
The MendelsSohn quartette sang a
song that elected a lively encore, and
Dr. r. d. Beard WAS introduced to re-
spOnd to the toast. Medicine an Exact
6cience. The eloquent and scientific
disciple of Aescolapius prefaeed his
speech with the honest declaration
that he had neither been born fool nor
had be developed into a fool, and then
he spoke of the technical nature of dis
ease, as treated through the light of
modern science. He was cheered to the
echo as he sat down, although it must
pc observed that his audience was rather
tnattentiYe during the delivery of his
speech. He illustrated by relating an
ecdotes of Mark Twain and other
humorous writers, and recurred oe-
easionally 10 his own personal eX-
periences III the realm OF practices.
He asserted that medicine is not an eX-
act science, bnt is nearing more and
more as the cycles of time ripen into
fruition TO the desired grade. The true
position of the student is TO make no
positive statement, and lhe speaker