The Bennington banner. [volume] (Bennington, Vt.) 1858-1894, 1892-02-12
WISE AND OTHERWISE.

-Hostess-May I introduce you to
Miss ConderP Well, if her name isn't
Anna.-Harper's Bazaar.
-One of the best tests of religion is
the collection basket.
Most men mix pound of ambition
witha grain of energy, and then wonder
that the world refuses to admire the mix
ture.
The farmers pleasant life.-Boston
girl Ito Uncle James)-nO you like living
on a farm?
Uncle James-Yes, J. like it very much;
Boston Girl suppose You like 1t wen
enough in the grand summer time, but
to 90 outin the cold and snow to gather
winter apples aud harvest winter wheat,
imagine might be anything but pleas
ant.-TerGs 81 tingS.
The best medical authorities say the
proper way t. treat catarrh is t0 take a
constitutional remedy like Hoods Sar-
saparilla
He had "frog in his throat" He
took one bottle nf DR.. Bulls Cough
Syrup and the frog jumped out TWEEN
ty-five cents did it.
81 always let a cold go rs it comes"
-one says; which means that he over
works the system in getting rid of cold
rather than assist it by using Dr. Bulls
Cough Syrup. Pray % cents.
-"What's Nabson's defense? Insan-
ityP" ',Nu," replied his lawyer; "Only
monomania. He couldn'tput up enough
for full-sized insanity defense.
GLOW are you coming on with your
tragedl?'
''Better than expected. I've killed
off all the principal characters except
two and they are not on speaking terms.
Her Duty was to Herself-IIe: Car
RE, will you make me the happiest OF
men?
She: / should like too, Harry, but l
think prefer to remain the happiest of
women.
Shocked Lady: Do you know what
becomes of li;tle boys who swear?
Little Boy; Yes'm. When they gifts
big enough they kin earn twO-an'-a half
day drivin' team.
Brown: How's your baby's health?
Sound ELI? Newpop: Yes, sometimes
think he's all sound
"A god-send is Ely's Cream Balm. l
had caElrrh for three years. Two or
three times week my nose would bleed.
| thought the sores would never heal.
Your Balm has cured me. Mrs. NJ. A.
Jackson. Portsmouth, n. H.
was so much troubled with catarrh
it seriously affected my voice. One bot
tie of Ely's Cream Balm did the work:
My voice is fully restored.-B. F. Lieps-
nor, A. NJ. Pastor of the Olivet Baptist
Church, Philadelphia, Pa.
Loving kindness is greater than laws;
and the charities of life are more than
all remonie.-TGLmud.
The Vanderbilt ladies are said to
possess $50O,O0O worth of laces. The
Astors value their stock oflaces at $780,
600.
The Boston Herald remarks that
Governor Russell is of presidential age.
Yes, but he isn't of presidential size.-
". Y. Press.
There are 81 law firms in the Union
composed of husbands and wives. and
about 200 women in all engaged in the
work of lawyers.
-"Why don't you try the bichloride OF
gold p urged his friend. II don't be-
lieve in it," said the desp ndent inebri-
ate. I'm silver man."-ChicGgO Tri-
bnne.
An average man of so has spent 5000
days, or nearly 20 years in sleep, and has
consumed about 1900 pounds of bread
and 10000 of meat, washed down with
1000 gallons of liquids.
In the United States the worker in
finished bar iron earns annually $3.50. In
free Gritain che bar iron workers an
nual wages amounts only to $375.-N.
Y. Press.
William Dean H0wells, who once
upon tipe WAS employed on the St~te
Journal at the very meagre salary paid
reporters "befole the war;" to get ST.
900 year for editing the Cosmopolitan
Magazine. Compensation for literary
work since those days has ''riz," like
wise William.-OhiO State journal.
The baker is busiest when lie is loaf
ing.
-Nell-"Did you enjoy your sleigh
ride ?" Belle-"Not very much, Charlie
can't drive single Ii nded."
-"Officer, there's big row going on
around the corner" "D0n't yez think
kin hear it, we chump? Move AMI"
IN. y. Press.
"A stock company has been formed to
control the book and shoe trade. Here
at last IL corporation WHICH VIII hafe
sole.-ChicdgO Tunes.
-Oldby-"Honesty, my boy, is the
best policy :" Newman-"Ah, yes; that
policy lapsed some time ago-s0me time
ago, old FELLOW. "-New York Herald.
This thing of marriage being a fail
ure Is more or less Il matter of ones own
doing. II a man uses Judgment in in
Yesting his wifc's money, he is reasOna-
bly, safe.-BOstOn Post.