New-York tribune. [volume] (New York [N.Y.]) 1866-1924, 1892-10-09
1T VAS 4 PRETTY SLOW TOWN.

But HE WAS NOT SURE OF 1T.
He wore faint smile OF pleasure when he walked
into the downtown drugstore. unbuttoned his coat
and leaned with air of expectancy against show
| case.
"Can do anything for your asked n clerk.
"Well maybe you can and maybe you can't" an
swered the other carefully removing speck from
| his coatsleeve. Il don't know" he added re1ec-
! lively.
Anything in my power I'll be glad to do" said the
clerk. smiling encouragingly.
| We'll. III tell YOU" answered the stranger. :" l
| live over in Jersey. My town IS pretty slow. You
| might almost call It dead. I'm sure you would II
YOU went over there only we're used TO II that we
| don't notice II much"
"Oh. yes" said the drug clerk looking little
| dazed.
Yes, exactly said the other with fattcring
SMILE "lou there Is never any excitement oVcr
our way: it's Just dead-dcad door-nail. Now
coming over on the fcrryboat to-day By the way
do y0u know much about cholera!
Cholera 2" asked the clerk, looking startled
whats that got to do with 1t ~
.Whv YES cholera Know anything about the
| symptoms"
took two or three steps backward and Lis eyes began
to dilate.
symptoms-that's It. should you say. for in
stance. that bad the cholera! Would you believe it,,
mean, 10 look at mel'
The Young man who dispensed drugs began to back
away looking rs If he were waiting for chance to
make break for the street
"oh. don't get frightened" said the New-Jcrsey
man, with his calm SMILE haNeh eoI lc ''i'o'd
| no such luck"
| Luck" exclaimed the startled clerk
"Yes. luck. I'd call it luck to set an Al. first
class, genuine, guaranteed Ease OF true Asac choiea
| freshly imported"
why, man, you're craz-eAcuse me, you can't
mean what you say :"
| Mean what l say ?" declared the searcher for
| cholera. Il mean every word that l tell
Won. sir that Was born In the dcadest town that
ever died was raised In 1t. / have lived In that
town for thirty four years. I'd rather live in grave
| ward. There aren't even ghosts or spirits III NY
| town. Now that place has got TO be walked up. II
we don't do something won't be able TO distinguish
| between dead man and a I've man. linen wen De
| I'm a petty tx, won't We! Wen have dead mcn-l
| mean really dead buying live mcn-l mean men
| that breathe: and we'll have live men hobnobbin-
with men that ought u have been buried long just
because evcIythines dead that 1t seems natural'
.Oh. OF course" gaspod the bewiidered clerk
"Now that place has got to wake up. There,
only one thing in the world that will wake 1t up.
That's cholera. Now | thought that Ia be WILING
10 catch the cholera take 1t there Just for the
| good of my town. I'm pubhc-s7iriied citizen ana
I'm willing 10 make some sacrifice 10 benefit my native
town. But found that they would not let me catch
| IT, Can't get TO poope who have the chO"ia-ihat
| Is can get there bat ! can't get away again. ~
course wouldn't do any good, wound IL! "ould
| IL now ~
Ul course not" answered the clerk. ready 10 shout
"unac' at first sign Of violence on The pant OF
| the stranger. . H.. II. , .,A. 10
| | thought maybe / could gel up good Imitation ~
cholera and take IL there. I'd nave II break out
soon as got well into town. ia drop ngnt down IN
| the street and begin 10 howl. I'd NICK ana yell ana
| dig nv nails into the ground ana turn summer
saults. When III" people got around 10 mo-O course
IL would take a long Time, for It's slO" tn"h-Id
grab every body could reach and yell cholera /
| thought mat would fetch them. They'd have TO i1g
mn hospital for and get me- into II ana take care
al me- Thcy'd get less Interested. you see.
Then IL knew the symptoms by heart, Ia 70 through
| hc whole business, ana by the time was GONZALES
cent thought that everybody In the town would have
heard that | had the cholera and that would do them
| Good. IL would wake them up you see
| Now" added hc New Jersey Dlilanthropist with "a
| public spirited smile, can you toacb me ANYTHING
| about symptoms That's what 1 want 20 know now
If can't get the cholera, I'll have to take the next
| best thing Can yOu help me out t."
| I'm afiaid not" said the clerk. why don't You
| try dynamite It's eBsicr.'
Oh. that wouldn't do any good. know them too
| well. They'd think dynamite explosions were q
church organ and they'd 20 right off 10 sleep again"
sorry bnt ! can't do anything for you In the
| cholera way" said the clerk.
"Wcl. good bye then. I'm SOTy TO have troubled
you Perhaps It's Just as well to give IL up. | amt
guess como to think Of It. that it would take whole
shplOad. I'll have 10 wait Maybe can got up =
JonstOwn disaster Chicago fire and maybe Wen
have better luck with cholera neNt season. Good
day. SIR" and he rcbuttoncd his coat and walked
| away with n thoughtful air.