The Wichita daily eagle. [volume] (Wichita, Kan.) 1890-1906, 1892-06-09
BY A SPIRIT HAND.
KILLED HIMSELF AND CAME BACK
TO WRITE HIS STORY.

I
Hopeiessly Discouraged Reporter on
Big Metropolitan DaiIy-Was 1t Rea
or Was 1t Simply a Horrid Dream?
1t was chilly April evening and Parl
row was crowded.
A steady drizzle fell slowly, converting
the streets into Shiny pools in which th'
pedestrians splashed mournfully. Through
the swinging doors of a great newspaper
building surged restless sea of humanity
Worn out and discouraged l breasted my
way through it to the editorial rooms.
/ was new man on the staff and / haG
failed to get my story. NY heart sank still
lower as | entered my chiefs presence; il
was my third unsuccessful attempt.
Couldn't get it, eh?'' he remarked after
hearing my report. "You seem to be hav
ing hard luck. I really don't know what
| to put you at now"
Just try me once more" begged. re
| Numbering that / was alone, friendless
and penniless in the great city; "just once
more and I'll work it out if die for it,.
Die for it. A bright thought had struck
! me- Yes, life wasn't worth living. I'd
| make a success for once-in death if not in
life.
| mentioned my thought to my chief,
and he laughed grimly. you'll do" he
said, evidently thinking that was joking.
''Try anything you please"
How cold and damp the air was as !
went out into the street again and turned
toward Broadway. How was | to die, |
pondered. Poison was unpleasant, and a
bullet made such a mess of ones appear
| ance. laughed aloud as / imagined my
landlady's horror on finding her floor
stained with blood. Several men turned
TO wonder at my odd mirth in the mist and
darkness. Once, in passing a brightly
| lighted window, caught sight of my face
in the glass--a face so distorted, so wild,
with bloodshot eyes, that almost thought
| the family faint of insanity had claimed
me for its victim at last. Perhaps it had
perhaps was mad.
An icy chill shot through every nerve at
| the horrible thought. I dashed forward
breathlessly until brought up before my
| lonesome lodgings on a side street.
| stumbled through the narrow, dark
halls to my room and opened the door, and
| as did so the dampness of the chamber
seemed like a breath from the grave. 1t
was needless to light match for the moon
shone full and bright through the dingy
window. It's beams trembled on the bare
floor, danced on the white bed, then crept
up the wall in silent, waving shadows
They made me shiver as 1 sat down to
think. Tonight | must die. Then the re-
action came and I almost enjoyed the
thought of the new experience and gloated
over the fact that l would be the first to
n,@S+ lie, %larr
My razor tried its keen edge and found
that 1t could sever a floating hair. Then
sat down again and rolled up my thread
bare sleeve. Bleeding, l had heard, was
an easy death. I gave the artery deep,
sharp cut with the blade and a stream of
crimson struck my shirt; the arm dropped
and | watched the tiny stream trickling
down my leg. 1t reached the floor and col
lected into tiny pool beneath the table.
watched it overflow and start down the
dusty planks, creeping out of the bright
moonlight into the shadows beyond. Ii
seemed snake crawling to its den. Per
haps twas asn4le-perhaps dreamed.
A feeling OF deadly weakness came over
me. glanced at the patch of moonlight
in the cracked mirror and saw a white
face, from which shone pair of cleaning
head fell forward on the damp sill. could
hear a mighty roar, roar like giant
Niagara that surged and beat upon my
maddened brain, roar far above that Of
the great city below me. The boom OF
cannon, the sharp rattle Of musketry and
the roll of huge drums seemed gathered
into volume of sound. Like the waves
Of the raging sea it surged over me. Then
= Il
sive, intense.
Too weak to lift my head 1 turned il
with a sigh and looked around the room
1t seemed filled with n misty sheen ana
through it tloated strange, dancing shad-
Ows Flashing lights spun before my Lalf
shut eyes. Then gray mist seemed to
swallow up everything and l could hear
the whir OF the presses as they ate up thu
vast piles of paper. / closed my eyes and
listened. Was it bell ringing? Slowly
came every stroke and it seemed to beat
like leaden hammer on my darkening
brain. was too weak to move my eyelids
more than hair line, but / could see
mass of blazing fire whose flames seemed
TO leap and dance and burn my very flesh.
\ chill that froze every drop of blood
struck me and for a second felt the con-
vulsion of mighty struggle. Then black
ness.
/ was standing on my own body-my
body that had rolled from the chair and
lay stiff and silent in the pool of blood be-
meath the table. | looked about without
curiosity, without awe, and wondered what
the reporters would say of that stiff, dead
form lying there in the moonlight-the
form, with the cleaning razor in the
stiffened hand and the maniac's smile on
the thin, hard face. In another instant /
had left it there, passed through the closed
door and out into the street. Ny motions
were strangely light and free. The great
building was blazing with light and the
reporters rushing to and fro as / entered
Many of them / knew; none knew or no.
ticed me. The whole building seemed to
shake with the roar of presses and the
tramp of men.
In dark corner have found notebook
and pencil and here l sit and write l can
hear fellow reporter telling the editor
that Edwards has just been found dead"
.Le news came through the phone minute
ago. They are talking now about giving
me funeral and discussing the kind of
coffin they will order.
nave almost llllSneu my story, you see.
l got it this time. Will the editor find
these notes and know that have kept my
word? l hope so.
As pen these last words see the faint
streaks of dawn breaking through the gray
mist. What next? Where shall go? |
do not know. | only know that my work
is done and so sign my first and last re-
port. - Lavi!le Edwards in New York
World.