Fairhaven herald. [volume] (Fairhaven, Wash.) 1890-????, 1892-02-25
FUN WITH A CIRCUS.
PLAYFUL RETALIATION OF AN IN
JURED COUNTRYMAN.

Maricopa" asked Mccormick as he lighted
g cigar Mccormick sells firearms in Ari-
nona, New Mexico and Colorado.
81 got to ella City. and heard there was
a circus at Maricopa, and thought I'd take
it in, for | wanted to sell a bill at Stanwix,
and might do something in Maricopa too,
1 don't know as you fellows ever saw
circus in the southwest. You wouldn't
know it. Every man in the shows a walk
ing arsenal-has TO be in that country,
And the man in the ticket wagon has guns
on all sides Of him. It's merely a matter
of preponderance of shooting weapons
which survives after circus time-the show
or the populace. This show had been in
Maricopa ten days, and there hadn't been
any trouble TO speak Of. One man from the
hills had been killed at the ticket wagon in
a dispute over the right change, but he'd
been warned if he asked for that flyer again
he'd get plugged. He did ask. with his
gun, but he missed somehow, and he was
plugged. Then they carried the corpse
around the ring on the back of the elephant
in the grand procession, as a solemn warn
ing to other disputatious hayseeds.
''The fact was they had a CRATER in their
wagon. Maybe you never saw a CRATER
workY
Never ulut Salu JdLues.
HOW THE CRATER" WORKS.
well, you see, there's always a mob
around the ticket wagon, and holding up
their hands, fourishing bills and gold
pieces, and bowling for tickets-greasers,
Injuns, cowboys, miners, ranchers, gam
blers, every kind you can think of The
ticket seller-the grafter-has a few one
dollar bills wound around his middle fin
ger, so that the ends come together, and it
looks as though he had twice as many bills
as he has A granger comes up for a ticket,
hands over five dollar bill, the CRATER
slaps down the ticket, thumbs over the
ends of four bills, in plain sight of the
farmer, whips them out from under his
finger. rolls them and hands them down.
Nine times out o. ten the hayseed grabs the
money, stuifs it in his pocket, and elbows
out of the crowd before trying to count the
change. Then he finds out that he has
only two one dollar bills, when he thought
he saw the ticket seller count him out
four Well, he goes back with fire in his
eye, but it doesn't do him any good. Any
how, IL didn't seem to the day ! was up to
Maricopa | was just getting near the
ticket wagon myself. when one O. these
rustics that'd had the himham game
played on him came rushing up and
squeezed through the gang You tarnal
thief he says to the CRATER, 'gi'me my
money. will youP
"The ticket man Just looked at him out
o. the corner of his eye and went on sell
ing until the sucker began to yell rob
bersP and things, when he shouted; Get
out o. herel You can't play that game
with this snccus.'
but, blast your carcass, | gave you a
tenner, and here's only four dollars back.
Cuss me if III pay more'n a dollar for any
succus'
You're crazy, old man; move along
now out O. the crowd, or you'll get hurt.
THE FARMER woRsTED.
THAT seemed TO annoy the farmer, for
quicker'n scat he put three bullets through
the wagon window to ease his mind, and
the CRATER began to pepper back, rather
regardless of the promiscuous crowd. i
skipped of to the gold chariot at one side,
got behind a big wooden angel on one
corner Of it, and staid there where | could
look out with little danger of getting a
pellet. But they stopped shooting pretty
soon. You see, the CRATER had two men in
the wagon who grabbed their guns the
minute the fuss began, and bazed away at
the old man, while the CRATER had settled
saw the odds were against him and he lit
out, swearing vengeance He had only a
scratch on the shoulder, but a stout copper
colored old lady from over the border mad
vertently got between him and one of the
slugs from the ticket wagon, and didn't
live 10 see the show. Her husband was
disposed to find fault. but the CRATER apollo
gized and passed him in free, so he. made
up his mind to let bygones be bygones.
Il think it was just after the big bare
back act that everybody in the tent sud
denly heard guns popping outside. But
the clown was just coming into the ring
and we didn't pay much attention to che
matter until casual bullets began to inter
fere with the comfort of the audience; and
when the clown himself was bowled oveI
and had TO be carried out on a banner
good many people became so interested il
the proceedings outside that they paid
little attention to the performance. Their
all nj once there was a commotion near tn,
dressing tent entrance and pack Of thirty
mounted cowboys galloped into the ring
The old hayseed was at the head of them
and every man had his fireworks out an,
ready for business
GETTING EVEN WITH THE TICKET SELLER
"As you fellows know I've travelled for
firearms house Tor twenty years and hav
handled weapons by the thousands. bu
when it comes to front view of shooting
machines in the paws Of a crowd Of earnes
citizens. Pm disposed to retire from bus
ness.
Il was afraid the visitors meant mi.
chief, and | was about TO drop down be
tween the seats and crawl out under tn
edge Of the tent, when they began crack
IA, away at the trapeze ropes, and in fiv
minutes they were all down. This rea'
sured me. They were evidently in a play
ful mood and wouldn't kin any one in tn
audience without serious provocatior
After this preliminary sport they force
eve. performer TO come in aud entertai
them with a snecial act. To wind up the
brought 10 &c CRATER. He was boun
hand and foot and was looking dismal, fo
sornetofr , a shot hole through his eai
ana it nurt. They unbound him and mad
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