davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
MS Mother,s CookIns.

He sat at the dinner table
With discontentod frown;
The potatoes AID steak we're underdone,
And the bread Was baked too brown;
The pie vas TOO sour, the pudding too
sweet.
And the roast was much too fat;
The soup so greasy. too. an salt
Twas hardly it for the cat
al wish you could eat tho bread and pie
I've seen nv mother make;
They are something like, and 'twould do
you good
Just To look at loaf of her cake"
Said The smiling wife: all Improve With
age;
Just now I'm but beginner;
But your mother has come 60 visit us,
And to-day she cooked the dinner"
Lizzie M. Hadley
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
Cuban Justice.

A gentleman from North Carolina,
while making tour Of the island OF
Cuba, had his watch stolen on the
street. In less than two hours Z
police Judge had sentenced the thiei
to three years. imprisonment. Ht
also awarded the North Caroliniar
S23 damages for the injury sustained
by his watch in the struggle for it'
possession, and ordered the cODyicj
to work IL out.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
rhe I.land. OF one world.

There are about 100, islands,
large and small, scattered over the
oceans. This country alone has 800
around its coasts, there are 365 in
the bay of Rio de Janeiro, 10000 be-
tween Madagascar and India, and
some 200 off the eastern coast of
Australia, between its mainland and
New Guinea.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
ninok.mIth. Pun Tselh.

There is room apparently for few
dentists at Kula, India. A cores
pendent says that the surgeon-den
lists there are the village black
smiths, and their forceps are tongs
two feet long. The difficulty with
these instruments is twofold, firstly
to get them into the sufferers mouth,
and secondly, to get them out again.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07

A new solution OF the wage prob
lem has been brought forward In
Belfast, Me. A shopkeeper hired a
clerk and paid him 81 for the first
week. At the end of the second
week the clerk was surprised when
he received only SO, and he asked
the reason OF the cut-down. "Why,"
responded the shopkeeper, "you
know more about the business now,
and the work must come easier to
you" The clerk, fearing a continued
application OF that unique theory,
resigned.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
Pound $40 In a Horses HOOP.

Something out of the drift of events
common is graciously furnished BY
the narrative of blacksmith, plying
his hammer and bellows on Chestnut
street, near Thirtieth. The brawnJ
son OF Vulcan relates that while
shoeing an indifferentiy constructed
horse a few days ago he came across
a gold double eagle imbedded in the
hoof of the animal.-Philadelphi;
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
Nicknames of European nations.

Englishmen have accepted the
name Of John Bull as suited to the
national character. A Scotsman is
Sandy; the Irishman derives his name
of Paddy from his national patron
saint; while an ancient nursery rhyme
records that Taffy is a Welshman.
English sailors call the Frenchman,
in contempt, Johnny Crapaud; but in
France he is Jacques BOnhomme, or,
as a bourgeois, Monsieur Prudhomme.
Cousin Michel is the name by which
the German is known to the CONT.
mental nations. Mynheer Closh, an
Authorization Of Nicholas, sums VI
the Hollanders, who are often simply
known as the Mynheers, while the
Switzer rejoices in the name of Colin
Tampon. We have all heard of the
Russian Bear and the Infidel Turk;
but these are hardly real nicknames.
Don Whiskerandos is almost a ma.
tional nickname for the Spaniards,
dating from Elizabethan times.
Italians are known as Lazzaroni, and
Danes are called Danskers..
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
cofee-Tea the New beverage.

A new beverage called coffee-tea l!
announced. 1t is an infusion o.
leaves from the coffee plant exactly
as tea is made from the leaf OF The
tea plant. The coffee leaves art
dried, pinch put in pot, and will
boiling water the coffee-tea is brewed
Until one tastes the decoction per
sonal opinion should he suppressed
Frankly it doesn't sound nice, doe
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07

Five great English warships are
now declared 20 have guns which are
unfit for service. These .ange from
Ito to 81 tons. The French 75-ton
guns, however, are said to be satis-
factory.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
M. rail Is His nar.m.tar.

A pigs tail is said to unerringly
Indicate the condition OF the animal.
IL it hangs loose it shows that the
pig is not well, and that its food
should be changed. II IL be coiled
tightly the pig is healthy and happy.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07

MISSOURI boasts OF a farmer poll
tlcian who does his own farming.
Such a character is unique In his day
and generation.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07

the English language has good
many words that, while not exactly
synonyms, can be applied to mean
an aggregation of units.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
Tse Vicious Horse.

The horse has no eyebrows, and l.
much white is visible in the eye it,
self it Is sure sign Of a viciom
nature.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
OUR BUDGET OF FUN.
HUMOROUS SAYINGS AND Do
iNoS HERE AND THERE.

Jokes and Joke'sts that Are Supposed %
Nave Been Recently Born Sayings aad
Doings that Are OdA Curious and
Laughable.
Crawford avalanche. (Grayling, Mich.) 1879-19??, 1892-07-07
HUNTING WILD HOGS
AN EPISODE ON SANTA CRUZ
ISLAND.

How Two Tenderfeet Were Taken In
The Tables Turned and the Hunters
freed by m Angry boar Equals "snipe
Banging"
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
Bounty to Agricultural
Societies.

1t should be known to all, that the boun-
ty OF the State given to agricultural socie-
ties is not distributed by the secretary of
Agriculture, according to his fancy or dis.
erection, but is carefully regulated by stat
ute enactment, and apportioned by the
secretary and executive council according
to law, In order that farmers may under
stand how this matter is regulated we pub
fish below the statute upon this subject,
from chapter 1856, section II, of the Re-
vised Statutes:
There shall be appropriated annually
from the State treasury, sum OF money
not exceeding one cent to each inhabitant
of the State, which shall be divided among
the legally incorporated agricultural socic-
ties of the State, not provided for by spec
ial enactment, according TO the amount of
premiums and gratuities awarded by said
societies provided, that no society shall
receive from the State a sum greater than
that actu lly raised and paid by the society
for said purposes. But the Penobscot and
Aroostook Union Agricultural Society may
receive as much as is raised by it not ex-
ceedng one hundred without regard to
population, and the Waldo and Penob-
scot Agricultural Society, as much as is
raised by it not exceeding two hundred
and fifty dollars, and the Ossipee Valley
Union Agricultural Society, not exceed
ing two hundred dollars"
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
Worlds Fair Notes.

\, !, ,,,nnuu,nl th,t ~. pnnn la. al
,.,a,oI that s,,o,.;nnns If tho hnau,iful
'.,,',',i, 'i'.,,,,.s mod. ,t Tho mns,ic
NJ j., ,l'a V,t;..n sh,ll no exl,;h;trd
", H., T,n,s;,;,, and th,t a, lnast ono
III sl,.,I h ,,,Jn axnrnssel, for tho
E,ir
,,, u.,,. ~, ,..,
i''e W." .n'N'n -" v, ,I W. a. "'","
ms 'aNeh S,'PS ~ nav. i''p",'' 'oi "
hipl'ioh al 'he ENl'oSni''i l''io,"Sl'p'..s
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
Spraying Experiments.

From experiments carried on under the
direction of the Horticulturist of the Maine
Experiment Station, with view to check
ing the work of the cooling moth, the fol-
lowing conclusions are drawn
All SPRAYED trees had a smaller per-
centage OF wormy fruit than did the I'M
sprayed.
=. A mixture of ! pound Paris green to
$50 gallons of water gave better results
than did weaker mixture; though mix
ture of I pound to $40 gallons saved a
large percentage of the fruit
I. The number of windfalls was greatly
lessened by spraying.
4. The proportion of wormy fruits
among the windfalls was much smaller
from the sprayed trees.
= There is no danger of poisoning
from the use of fruit which has been
sprayed as directed.
s. The best time to spray probably
varies with different varieties, but in no
case should any trees be sprayed before
the blossoms fall.
7. There is greater liability to injury OF
foliage from the use Of London purple than
from the use of Paris green.
A study was also made as to means OF
preventing or checking the ravages Of the
apple scab.
Apple scab is caused by the attack of a
parasitic fungus which grows on the leaves
and young twigs as well as on the fruit.
The attack is most severe in cool, moist
seasons, and if it occur early in the season
before the years growth is completed, the
treec may he eeriouslv injured
Spraying with carbonate of copper dis
solved in ammonia and diluted, has prov
ed an effective means Of holding the fun
gus in check. The average increase of
salable fruit on the sprayed trees, over
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
The Banled pessimist.
JoHNIKExpRIck Bangs.

sat me down TO write a rhyme of gloom.
All Was in tune for it; my temple throbbed,
In semi-darkness was my cherries room,
And through the trees the sad breeze
soughed and sobhed
NV heart was burning with a fancied woe;
Digestion waited not on appetite.
My spirits came in dun and sluggish now;
Naught was there in the world that pleas
ed my sight.
My pen itself would not put down the thought
The pessimistic thought that held my mind
Try as l would the fancy lewuncaught,
Uncatchable as any truant wind.
Yet wrote | on. and when the rhyme complete
stared boldly at me from the saffron page,
! found myself victim to defelt-
I'D written this a truly happy age!
I'd said that in this life were more of good
Than wicked things; despite the heavy
mist
OF present trials, those who understood
Life as it really is could not resist
The true conclusion, tried and guaranteed,
That we have many blessings and no grief,
However much because of it the heart may
bleed.
Has ever been without some sweet relief.
Alas that /, disciple true of gloom,
Philosopher of woe, should e'er confess
That joy upon this earth hath any room,
That mortals find here aught of happiness!
And yet, though seem faithless to my creed
In writing then that optimistic song,
| am not so. II proves its truth, indeed,
When even |. its follower, go wrong.
Hdrper's Weekly.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

4 Chfab PaiM is an EabrNSi7f rant.
You want to buy 20 gallons to paint
your house You find paint that is IS
cents per gallon less than the Chiffon.
You can save S. Let us see. The
cheap paint YOU will find contains one
tenth of gallon less paint than the Chill
ton. has water in it. and is deficient in
body and cannot be made to cover the
same amount of surface within one-fltth.
Because the cheap paint is short one
tenth in measure, you must buy - So
called gallons to get what YOU want, 20
actual gallons. Now your cheap paint
will not cover within one-tifth the same
surface. You must therefore buy four
gallons. This makes 70 gallons OF cheap
paint against 20 gallans of the Chiffon
Paint.
How about the S you were going to
save?
For sale by Il. l.. WALKER, Skowhegan, Me-
Chiffon Paint Co, Boston and New York
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
FARM and GARDEN
Free Wool.

The effect of the Mckinley tariff has
been to increase the consumption of wool
per capita and to decrease the importation
of shoddy. The cry that the tariff has
forced the manufacturers to substitute
shoddy for wool is a favorite one with the
free trader but there is absolutely no eX-
cuse for it as the statistics show The
fact is that the per capita consumption OF
wool in this country has constantly in
creased under protective tariff until to-
day it is greater than any other nation in
the world In 1870 the consumption of
wool in this country was 7o,79o, 80 pounds
or ]. 20 pounds per capita In 1890 it was
56S,17z,S54, or 9.o7 pounds per capita.
Today the United States produces not
less than 500, 900, 900 pounds of wool. or
more than half the amount consumed by
the people. The farmers scattered through
every State in TIE Union own nearly IS,
DOC. 900 head OF sheep. valued at more
than sII7,5oo, 900, Maine has 569,577,
valued at SI,7I7,274. The effect OF the
tariff upon this industry is shown by the
fact that from 1867 when it was accorded
the first real protection, to 1883 the tiocks
in this country had increased by more than
s, soc, 900, head. Thu act of 1855 slightly
decreased the duty and in the four years
up to 1880 there was a loss Of 5000, 900
sheep. The Mckinley bill again gave the
farmers adequate protection for their
great industry and in a single year there
was an increase of more than 1900, 900,
the tiocks aggregating 44,93S,363 at the
beginning of the present year
1t IS easy to figure from the effect OF the
slight reduction of the duty in 1883, what
the result would be if the entire duty was
removed in accordance with the Demo-
cratic programme. Destroy the tlocks in
this country and make us dependent upon
foreign wool and the very condition now
denounced by the free traders would be
firmly established namely, the people
would be forced to clothe themselves in
shoddy. Such is the consistency OF the
Democratic party. The American farmer
will know how to rebuke a party that
would destroy an industry in which they
have s1I7,5oo, 900 invested. -B0Hgor
II HE.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
Maine Experiment Station.

In the report of the Horticultural OF the
Maine Experiment Station for 1891. GER
tain points in the culture of cabbages, to-
matoes and egg plants are discussed.
In the culture of cabbages it was found
that the best results were obtained by
transplanting several times. 1t was OBJ
served that some varieties of cabbages are
attacked by the cabbage worm much
worse than others. Those varieties hav-
ing firm close heads are least injured. OF
the twenty varieties grown, those recon-
mended for general culture are; Jersey
Wakefield, Brunswick Early Summer and
Flat Dutch.
The following is a summary of the ex-
periments in tomato culture:
The plants should be kept growing Wig
orously; condition involving rich soil
and frequent tllage Frequent trans
planting makes stocky plants, Trimming
plants after part of the fruit had set, in
creased the yield by more than one-third
The best varieties for general use appear
to be Ignotum. Perfection, Beauty. Gold
en- Queen, and possibly Prelude
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
The [ Sc of II Roller.

Every day it is becoming more FIRMLY
established that good road-roller is the
most valuable piece OF machinery employed
in the road-maker's art; and indeed, with
out il, neither can the foundation or sub
soil of the roadway be made uniformly
hard and reliable, nor the surface-layer be
given that uniform compactness and sol
ldity which give excellence to the road and
insure perpetual economy in the cost OF
maintenance and repairs. To one who
has seen a heavy road-roller used in com
pacing the soil of new roadway these
facts will be very evident. II a length OF
one thousand yards in an ordinary earth
road be cut to an exact and uniform grade
one foot below the original surface OF the
road. it will be found in most cases that
the new surface thus exposed will present
an appearance which to the ordinary OBJ
server is OF uniform material and even
hardness from end to end but the passage
of a roller weighing from ten to fifteen
tons over this new surface will soon dis
close defects and soft spots located at If
regular intervals throughout the length of
the work and as the process OF rolling
continues, the uniformity of the grade
will disappear, and what at first appeared
to be a tolerably satisfactory surface will
develop into succession Of humps, holes,
and fluctuations. In the using OF the
roller in actual work these depressions
and soft spots are carefully filled up and
brought to the line of the required grade,
while the successive passing OF the heavy
roller over the filling gives to the entire
road that form and consistency which are
so essential to every good highway.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
Turkey Eggs under Hens.

Turkeys should not be allowed to brood
the first litter. Their eggs are too val
liable early in the season to stop their pro-
duction by incubation. If kept from sit
ting the hen turkey will after few days
lay second litter, and the process may
with old hen turkeys reach a third setting.
If set under hens nine eggs are enough,
the egg is larger than a hens egg and
the Young in it are easily killed by a little
exposure to the cold. Common hens
make better mothers for young turkeys
than those of their own kind. The latter
wander too far and do not keep quiet while
the dew is on the grass, thus dragging
their Young and soon killing most of them
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

that on unsprayed trees was 50 per cent
while in some cases the increase amounted
to o. per cent
\ solution OF three ounces OF carbonate
of copper in one quart OF ammonia, dilut-
cd with thirty-five gallons of water, was
found very satisfactory. The cost of
spraying with this solution is about three
cents per tree for each application.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
WYE GUARANTEE SIX bones
$500. 90 REWARD !

WE will paw the above reward for any case of Liver
Com laint, Dyspepsia Sick II aadache Indigestion,
Constipation or Costvcness we cannot cure with
Vests Vegetable Liver Pills, when the directions are
strictly complied with They purely Vegetable,
and never fail to give satisfaction. Sugar Coated.
Large boxes, containing 30 Pills, % cents Beware o.
tured only by THE JOHN c, WEST COMPANY,
CHICAGO, ILL Sold by Roland 7. Patten.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
A PATRIOTIC WORK.

Every person who is opposed to Free Trade
slavery and favors American Industrial Indo-
pendence secured through the policy of Pro-
lection, should read the documents published
by the American Protective Tariff League. As
documents in the hands of your friends. They
are interesting and instructive, and embrace
discussions of all phases of the Tariff question.
The League publishes 90 different docu-
ments, comprising nearly GOO pages of plainly
printed, carefully edited and reliable informa-
ton. Among the authors of these documents
are Hon. James G. Blaine; VIM. Mckinley, Jr.,
Governor OF OHIO; Senator S. NJ. tullum, of ILL.,
nss; Senator Joseph n; Doph of oregon
Frye, of Maine; senator asey, OF North Dakota;
Senator Justin = Morrl, OF Vermont; senator
Nelson w. Aldrich, of Rhode Island; Hon.
Thomas IL. Dudey.'f New Jersey; Hon. Robert
ton; Commodore W IL. II. Hughes Hon. +. A.
IInrtshorn, of New York Congressman Dollver.
Of Iowa; Hon. b. +. Jones David Hall RICE OF
DIR. E. +. Miller, of New York; Hon. Geo. Draper.
of Mass; Hon. c. l.. Edwards, of Texas; Judge
VIM. Lawrence, of Ohio; Hon ID. G; Hartman,
of New York Hon. Geo. g. Boutwell,, OF Mass;
Ensley, of Tennessee.
This complete set of documents will be sent
to any address, post paid, for Fifty 500 Cents.
Address, Wilbur F. Wakeman, Sec'y, No. 70
West Twenty Third Street, New York.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

FD'FIng station; at WHICH TfAIHN VIII hNUP
on signal or notice to Conductor.
Mixed between Bingham and No. Arson
STAGE CONNECTIONS.
At Norrdgewock, for Skowhegan and Mer-
Ger; at Arson. for Sawyer's Mills, tStarksl;
No Arson, for North and West New Portland
Dead River, Flagstaff and Eustis At Bingham
for Forks and Moose River.
Trains connect at. Oakland with trains to
and from Boston, Portland Lewiston, Water
Vile, Augusta, Gardiner, Skowhegan and Ban
gor. - o.,
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

The professional mind reader has very little
to do. People do not have the mind to employ
him.
do when he graduates; 7" Yes, he's going to
give spread.
Since il is row w-ll-established fact that
catarrh is a blood disease, medical men are
quite generally prescribing Ayers Sarsaparilla
for that most loathsome complaint. and the
result, in nearly every instance, proves the wis
dom OF their sdyce.
Mr.. jerks. "what trusting little woman
Georges wife is" Mrs. jerks. Eyes. She
has never been married before"
Buckingham's Dye for the Whiskers is pop
ulsr prepara'ion in one bottle. and colors
evenly brown or black. Any person can easily
apply it at home.
There's one advantage in being married
which YOUR friends do not possess. You are
not obliged to eat any of the wedding cake.
"The flowers hat bloom in the Spring"
not more vigorous than are those persons who
purify their blood with AYERS Sarsaparills.
The tabled Elixer Vitae could scarcely impart
greater vivsci,y to the countenance than this
wonderful medicine.
1t is fair TO presume The fool is fond OF his
folly. else he would not be so anxious that
everybody KNOW Wudt HUI ht IT,
HAyv been a suf from catarrh for 40 wears.
| found immediate relief in the use of Ely's Cream
Balm Since using il I have not suffered mo-
nent from headache, throat or loss of sleep,
from which | previously suffered. caused BY ca
tarrh. | consider YOUR Balm. valuable remedy
r. 6 Nassar, 60 Warren st New York.
Elys [ re an Balm Is worth its weight in gold as
a cure Tor catarrh. One bottle cure me.-S. A
Lowell Franklin. Pa. 2wIo
The Temperance question is the bicycle Of
:. .. .t..ks
statesman who cannot straddle it with ease and
grace,
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
HEALTH IS WEALTH
q Raj NJ

DIX. +. C. wEsrs NERVE AND BRAIN TREATMENT, a
guaranteed specific for Hysteria, Dizziness, Convul
sions Fits, Nervous Neuralgia, Headache, Nervous
Prostraton caused by the of alcohol OF tobacco
Wakeiuness, Mental Depro ssion, Softening of the
Brain resulting in insanity ard leading to misery,
decay and death, Premature Old Age, Barrenness,
Loss of Power In either sex, Involuntary Losses and
Spermatorrhna caused by overexcrton of the brain,
self-abuse ovcrindnlgence. Each box contains
one months treatment Lon box, or six boxes for
$500, sent by mail prepaid on receipt OF price
WE GUARANTEE SIX BOXES
To cure any case. With each order received by us
for six boxes, accompanied with 800, we VIII SEND
the purchaser orr written guarantee to refund the
money If the treat ment does not effect cure GUAR
ant ees issued onls by Roland I. Patten Druggist.
Sole Agent Skowhegan, Me.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

that did me the slightest good. 1t gave
me Permanent Relief. am now well
and strong. have recommended this
medicine 10 many people for Kidney
Disease. and they all agree with me in
saving that DR.. David Kennedy's Fa.
yorite Remedy has not its equal in the
wide world for this distressing and Of
ten fatal complaint.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

81 think mistook my calling" said the
young man when his opponent laid down four
aces. BIZ 3I6I
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

Trains leave Skowhegan as follows: s.35 a.
NJ. for all points West and for Bangor l.i5 M
for Waterville, Oakland North Arson, Lew
iston, Dexter Dover and Foxcroft. Bangor Bar
Ha1 Dor, St. John and Aroostook County, Port
land and Boston. 800 p. NJ mixed for Water
Vile. enabling passengers to take night Pull
man for Portland and Boston.
ARRIVALS:-7.OO A. NJ. (mixed) except Mon
days: 100 A. NJ Passenger from Portland,
Lewiston, Augusta and Bangor; $40 p NJ. from
all points.
PAYSON TUCKER, Vice Pres, x Gen Man.
f. Il. BOOTHBY, General Pas'r Agent.
Portland, Nov. "a, 1891.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

For years | was aMict-
cd with Kidney Disease
in its most acute form. l
tried different kinds Of
treatment and spent q
great deal of money. only
10 find myself worse than
ever. DR.. kennedy's Fla.
Iyorite Remedy say 1t
,with a perfect recoilec.
zion of all that was done
for me-js the only thing
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19

DANA'S SARSAPARILLA CURES.
The Somerset reporter., 1892-05-19
A DRUGGISTS TRIBUTE
Kidney Disease
IN ITS MOST ACUTE FORM CURED.

Mr.. Lyman Crawford, Proprietor OF the
Popular Crawford Pharmacy oil SPRING
feld Massachusetts. writes:
The record-union. [volume] (Sacramento, Calif.) 1891-1903, 1892-04-02

If you are bilious, take BEEeHAM's
PILLS.