davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

Landor always pronounced yellow
as yallar. We have heard Mr.. A. r.
Wallace, the eminent naturalist, dur
ing the course of lecture, repeated
ly sound it thus, a mode ofpronuncia-
ton said, indeed, to be traditional in
many good old English families, and
which includes the substitution of
laylock for lilac. Room for Rome,
goold for gold, and wonderful for
wonderful.
A homely old rural dean, long since
(dead, used always, like Sam Weller,
to leave out the W in woman, and his
Wilt thou have this CONAN to be thy
welded wife? was apt to mar the So
lemnity of a marriage service.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

Irate passenger, as train is moving
off-Why didn't you put my luggage
in as I told you? Porter = Eli, mon,
yer luggage is no sic fule as yerseP.
Ye're i the wrang train.
Witherby-How is your new servant
girl getting on? Spongelet-She's got
beyond that. She's gone.
The Court Would you believe this
man on oath? Paddy Orally I'M
less he swore he wor lynn, yer honor.
What occasioned the hitch to- night?
asked the new reporter. The educat-
ed horse forgot his lines" answered
the manager.
Mrs B. Don't you think the Lu
theran service is sweet? Mrs. X. Cab
sently)-I don't know. All mine is
Dresden.
''1'his tea is weak as water" growl
ed the irritable boarder. e'I've seen
water hold up an ocean steamship"
retorted the boarder who was in love
with the landlady.
There are two kinds of unhappy
people in the world, those who are
sad because they are not known and
those who are miserable because they
are known too well.
Papa" said lad the other night,
after attentively studying for some
time an engraving of human skele
ton, chow did this man manage to
keep in his dinner?''
Photographer-No then, MI. Cross
er, if you please, look pleasant for
moment. That's it. A moment long
err there! You may now resume
your natural expression.
Assistant-Don't you think Spacer's
work is deteriorating? Editor Quitting
a bundle in an envelope)- is GER
tainly going back.
''He's great editor, isn't hep" said
one reporter to another. "I should
say SO. Why, he gets SO used to say
ing 'we' that he often puts two fares
in the street-car ticketbox"
81 hope, Johnny" said the Sunday
OShOO1 UCdCIlCI w nGI uCW SCuOldT.
"that your parents are good Chris
tians." "Well, ma is" replied John
ny; ''and pa used to be, but guess he
is little out Of practice now"
Patent Medicine Manufacturer :
Doctor, don't you think you could dis
cover a new disease?' Discover a /
new disease! What on earth should [ I
do that for?" Because have a new
patent medicine which is the very
thing for it.''
"Mary could not go to school this
forenoon" read the teacher from the
pile of notes left on her desk, ssbe-
cause her mother has broken her leg,
and hope she will be excused for it.
HER FATHER, j. SMITH"
He Il am delighted with my new
doctor. He promises to make my
disappear within a
month. She (shocked)-But then we
shall have to buy barometer.
Boys have been ruined because they
stone when they should have been al
lowed TO go a-HSh1hg.
care you going to give your pastor
a vacation this summer" stNot ex-
actly," replied the member who has
trouble in keeping awake. ave will
send him away and take one ourselves
She (after an absence of several
years abroad) = How do you do? So
delighted, Pm sure. Not married yet?
Why, the last time saw you it seems
to me you were engaged. He Yes,
was. She = Let's see; to whom?
He-To you.
The ladies of the Library association
Of Ostego, Mich, needed 5000 to clear
5heir buildings of a mortgage. To
'aise that amount some of the fair
ones blackened boots, while others
sold popcorn, shoestrings and taffy on
he streets. The money was forth
coming.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

GOOD AND RELIABLE.-A good and reliable
family medicine is Sulphur Bitters. Every
Spring for six years have been troubled with
boils. Since 1 began using Sulphur Bitters,
have not had single one. You can rely on
Sulphur Bitters every time.-Editor Weekly
NelCs.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

Mrs. VI. Schaenberger, Beaver Dam, Wis,
writes: 1--WE have used DR.. Thomas Eclec-
trio Oil in our family for coughs, colds Group
and rheumatism. 1t cures every time.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

Song of the medical student-Some-
bodies coming.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

Little Arthur was visiting his grand
mother who owned large rooster,
that was possessed of fighting quail
ties. Arthur went out to feed the
chickens, when the rooster flew at
him, pecking him severely. Arthur
beat him off as well as he could, and
finally got away and ran to the house.
Some time later he was playing on
the porch, when all at once the rooster
flew upon an adjoining fence and
crowed Justify. Arthur looked up and
exclaimed: "You lie, you lie, you
didn't lick me! [ runnedi'
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

Higher spiritual truths can not be
kept within the limits of human logic.
Supernatural truths are superlogical.
Human logic can not show the entire
consistency of divine sovereignty
with mans free agency, or of infini-
tude of God with the existence of
finite beings, or of many another bib
hcal paradox. Hence the man who
holds to a logically complete system
of theology is necessarily limited in
his view to a moiety of Gods revealed
truth.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

Burdock blood Bitters taken after eating
viii relieve any feeling of weight over full
ness of the stomach. Sold everywhere.
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

To cleanse sponges, wash them in
warm soap suds containing ammonia
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

Some preachers are not successful.
Perhaps they have not been prayed
for after the manner Of a colored
brother who, having obtained the pull
pit services of Northern clergyman,
made this supplication: 80 Lord,
Dress dis yer wife brudder dats come
down from de Norf to preach to US.
Fill him wild de fame oh de spirit. FIJI
him wild de kerosene oil OBJ salvation
and set him ON fre!n
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

The Japanese evidently understand
advertising. The following book deal
er's announcement is given in the
London Graphic: "Books elegant as
singing girl. Print clear as crystal.
Paper tough as an elephants hide,
Customers treated as politely as by
the rival steamship companies. Goods
despatched as expeditiously as a can
non-ball. Parcels done up with as
much care as that bestowed on her
husband by loving wife. "-Woneaao's
Tribune
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25
.JEFFERSON'S TEN COMMAND
MENIIS.

Never put off till tomorrow what
you can do today.
Never trouble another for what you
! can do yourself.
Never spend your money before you
have it.
Never buy what you do not want
because it is cheap; it will be dear to
you.
Pride costs US more than hunger,
thirst and cold.
We never repent of having eaten
too little.
Nothing is troublesome that we do
willingly.
How much pain the evils that never
happened have cost us.
Take things always by their smooth
handle.
When angry count ten before you
speak; if very angry, hundred.
A gentleman who made hasty trip
through Europe was never tired, after
he came home, of telling where he
had been and what he had seen. II
visited Russia, Germany, Austria, It
ally, p" Indeed! So you saw Venice?"
IT should think 500 ''Did you see the
Lion of St. Mark?'' 1T guess I did!
Why, saw him fed!" Scarcely more
intelligent was the remark of an
American lady who, after a visit to
Venice, was asked what she thought
of the city, and replied that she ''could
hardly tell, because there was such a
freshet when she was there that peo-
were going round the street in boats"
Orleans County monitor. [volume] (Barton, Vt.) 1872-1953, 1892-07-25

JOoAO an OctOJ I1OW uO you uO! DO
delighted, Pm sure. Not married yet?
Why, the last time saw you it seems
to me you were engaged. He Yes,
was. She = Let's see; to whom?
He-To you.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

NEW York, May THE wonders
surely are The miracles of millinery and
the streamers whose partl-colored lengths
fly In tn face of all male creation. The
rage for these eccentrlcities is perfectly
immense, and no fashion mas ever been
more universally followed or more gener
ally abused. 10 may be that two long
tails Of 'esu de nil" satin four inches
wide, with an aggressive rosebud catch
ing them together about halfway, hiding
the curve Of the wearer's neck. or hap-
ping In the eye of some unfortunate
passer by, Is pretty, but to one who
studies fashion as a becoming adjunct to
nature, It Is Just the reverse.
have told you a good deal about
gowns lately but not much about coats
That Is because there is no actual half
seaso.. In America, just as there is no
twilight. The American climate Is so
decided, 10 has no half tones, Ladies'
seem TO plunge from jackets Of cloth and
fur into gowns Of muslin aud silk. Now
and then, however, a cool day comes
without any warning and II is impossible o
TO 20 back TO the fur trimmed garments
Covert coats are the things which
should be worn on these odd days. The
strsight-bscksd coat is sold as well, but
u takes the straightest, and most styl-
ish girl 70 wear It properly. The covert
coat should be made of box cloth with
strip seams, aud semi fitting aud single
breasted with a fly front like a gentle
mans top.coat.
Mountaineering is fast becoming one
Of the favorite summer rscreations OF
our atbletically inclined girls. There Is
no use in our adventurous modern dam.
sci expecting TO figure about the noun.
tain wilds. In fimsy draperies, shlffous
and laces. Thick materials are most
essential-materials that will stand a
heavy shower or cloud Of dust. Waist
coats OF a masculine sort Of stuff called
'Tatterssll' are to be recommended,
while the costume should bs composed OF
stout serge or cloth.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07
HoNoRs ARE EASY.

The ship building industry Is Of iu-
estimabie Importance 20 Wilmington.
Wilmington is Of equal Importance to the
ship building industry. They are
mutually advantageous. mutually bene-
fetal, to each other.
The natural conditions, ths friendly
legislation and cheap labor Of this city
are OF great Importance to the shops;
while the employment they give is OF
great Importance to the people.
The people are friendly to the shops.
The owners Of the shops are,
In many cases. public spirited
and not more selfish and grasping than
the same class Of people In other places.
They are, perhaps. better citizens. on an
average, here than their class Is else
where, though they have been occupied
chiefly, 30 far as the public knows, in &C
cumulating private fortunes for private
uses.
The people are not inimical to them,
on that account or on any account, but
they have not earned any debt Of graft
tude They have done no more charity,
they have been no less selfish than any
other class Of citizens. They used the
natural advantages, friendly legislation
and cheap labor, to build large, i'm
portant, and profitable industries Of
which the people justly feel very proud,
and, from which the owners have OBJ
tained fortunes.
Thus the hOnors are easy. There Is
no enmity, no gratitude due for or
against either party from the other
That is true also Of the ship building in
duslry elsewhere
With those facts In mind what have
we to say in regard to the Congressional
legislationf
One contention is that the facts show
that the protective, non registry legis-
lation has not only failed to provide any
benefits. but has retarded and localized
the shipping industry and driven our
flag from the seas.
The ship builders admit the distressed
condition. but deny the alleged cause.
and propose, as remedY-subsidies
The American people are unslterably
opposed to subsidies. They cannot con.
eeive why profitable private industry
should demand public charity; or. why
an improbable private industry
should be maintained at public
expense. They do not main
tain religions thus, then why
maintain an inoustryl There is no war.
rant In the Constitution for using public
money for such purpose. The history
Of shipping everywhere proves that the
only sensible, effective, legitimate. fair
houest means Of assisting any private
enterprise Is the maintenance Of the sam,
policy that Is maintained by the United
States towards the ehurches-that o.
letting them alone.
The average legislator does not know
any more about "hslpiug an Industry
than he knows about promoting religion.
He would be as much AZ sea In shipping
as be would be useless as decoy duck on
the mourners bench in religion. Leglsla-
tion in either case is simply a tsmpta.
tion to fraud; the Legislator is insom7e-
ssnt In both.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

In merchandise of every
kind we count character and
style above even laIgeness of
stock and iownt IS of prices.
Take Clothing, Boys Cloth
ing, for instance-the sorts
that most Clothing store slight
or skip. Only careful, we'll
trained workers can turn
out such styles as we show.
And the little prices come as
a matter ofcourse, littler very
likely than you'd be asked for
common run things in other
stores Evidence:
XII Suits.
Galatea Stripes, combinations, 2
coloriugs, at 81.
Cunard Cloth, light blue and white
with navy blue trimmings, white
linen brand, at SO 80
White Drill with varying colors in
collars and cuffs, handsomely EN-
broidered, at 60
Light blue and white striped Coata-
line, with white blouse, at ST. so.
Pink and blue Madras with wuite
braid, blouse included, at e9 So
Zona0e SA1tS.
Blue and white stripes, including
white blouse at SO. 80.
Galatea Stripes, with blouse, 3 TO 2
years, at $6
Electric Blue Drill Suit, trimmed with
narrow white linen braid, 3 to 1C
years. at $45O
Sailor SHzkS.
Galatea Stripes. oolorlngs, 8 COM
binations. 3 TO 10 years, at 50 so.
Galatea Stripes, with embroidered
white flannel shield, white soutache
braid on collar and cuffs, to s
years, at SO
Bedford Cord in light blue and white,
olive.aud-whits and pink-and
white, pique collar and shield %
10 years, at $4.
Striped Coataline Suit trimmed with
linen braid, white and.pink OF
gisy-and white, to 10 years,
$3.50.
White Drill Suit with stripes OF
linen braid. navy blue trimmings,
3 TO 10 years, at $4
Market street.
Nothing handsomer than the
Bashkirtseff Outing Coat has
come from the modelers' hands
this season. Three of the
happiest thoughts in three of
the dashingest designs of this
Spring so prettily put to.
gether that you only think OF
the resulting perfection. With
Bell Skirt and Bodice Belt, So.
Second sOor. Chestnut street.
John WANAMAKER
Evening journal., 1892-05-07
scALosp AT sINeEaLY.
John Walter sustaiDs Fatal Injuris
pelawaresns Purchase Fa' ms.

John Waiter suataiDs Fatal Injuries.
pelawaresns Purchase Fa'ms.
EAsToH, Nd, May John a.
Walter, while turning on wa,er at the
mill of the Singerly Pulp ana Paper
Company yesterday morning was acsi-
dently and perhaps fatally seaded about
the breast, face and arms by the explo-
sion of sp over-heated feed-water tube
Be vas removed 20 bis home oud Or. NJ
Ellis and nurse summoned to attend
him. Walter was formerly Of Chesapeake
City, ana vas employed up to within a
year ago as fireman on an Ericsson
steamer. plying between Philadelphia
ard Baltim ore, and since has filed his
present position De has wife and
three small children
The valuable farms Of the late Ben.
smin J Green Of Warwick, we're sold
at public sale az that place yesterday b.
+ p March, executor. The Greenwood
farm, containing 265 acres, was pur
chased by George q McIniire Of Odessa
Delaware, for $50 80 per acre. or S14. 7O8
Aud the Meadows farm, containing
452 acres, was purchased by George w.
Lockwood, Of Warsick. at $40 per acre
The orshsrd Field, a small tract rs
served, WAS afterwards sold for $50 pei
acre,
Evening journal., 1892-05-07


LITTLE INTELLIGENCE, NO HUMos.
The platform writer for the Repubh
cans Of Delaware is novice BE has
talent-pure tin plate talent-but he
lacks shat experience in writ good
English. which might be corrected in any
grammar school; he lacks intelligence,
and he is painfully. pitnully efficient In
the sense OF humor.
He Is jealous. There is no question Of
that, but zeal Is not a substitute for
facts and sense in platform. II the
writer were speaking in negro
church; II he were marching In a
variegated procession Of mercenary
voters which suddenly halted, because
the drum corps could not pass a beer
saloon, that platform would sound very
we'll. Shouted in voice like a private
secretary's from the elevation Of an empty
beer key, inspired by an equally apparent
cranial emptiness, it would meet the re-
quirements. But II does not look well in
cold type; it reads worse,
The convention should have provided
a scholar, who At least. knows when to
use those simple propositions 'be-
tween" and among" They provided
instead that sort OF a man, who, with
that curious retributlve justice which
makes fool OF the critic, referred to
Thomas IF. Bayard's course as "in
striking contrast" in feebleness and
puslllanimity" to that OF Mr. Blaine.
That one silly, unnecessary, spiteful and,
withal, supremely ridiculous sentence
came from a man whose attempted in
dictment Of Mr.. Baysrd, one Of the
really great men Of the country and a
man whom every Delawarean Of every
class respects and honors. places the
writer in category which every sensible
citizen despises and 20 which every man
may apply his own terms Of detestation.
The Dover platform was written by
man who could not or would not perceive
the humor Of referring to the Mckinley
scheme for higher wages thus. "Under
IL new Industries have been established
aud old ones flourish. American labor
hos continued to reap It's rich reward,
while the prices Of protected products
have not advanced" When a strike,
against two cuts In wages within two
months, is in progress in New Castle; /;
when II has just been published that the
fattest and richest envelope, which ever
left that Knowles wooden mill, with its
eighty per cent protection, was s45 for a
months labor.
The man who could write that In spite
OF recent efforts, made In vain, to show
any prosperity due to the Mckinley aid
to prosperity in spite OF the efforts made
TO fad 4 man whose wages have been in
creased; In spite Of the fact that wages,
as general thing, have been decreased I;
IN spite OF the trusts which have been
found to take advantage Of the Mckinley
aid 20 Increased prices. Is a man without
a sense Of humor, without intelligence
enough, himself TO give other people
credit for any.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07
WHAT IT REALLY Is.
The Most Dangerous Of Modern Disorders
Clearly Dehned-PneumoaiA and what

The Most DangsrOss Of Modern Disorders
cleariv Dehned-PBsumoaiA and what
Causes It.
There has been great mistake as to wha.
pneumonia really Is. People. and even some
physicians. have called it dangerous dis
ease. Pneumonia Is always an after effect.
II the system is run down. weakene debih-
tated, II the life Is at a low ebb.the lungs may
al up and the person die suddenly. and Il is
called pneumonia. No man or woman
ever died OF pneumonia when the
body was strong, vigorous and healthy.
IL comes upon one whea weakened
by grip. by severe cold or Overwork sud a
generally weaker ed condition. Such being
the case.hOw can this dreadful trouble known
as pneumonia be prevented OF wa ed Off
Manifestiy. by strengthening and fOrfitying
the body by having the health and strength
II IL should. can silly be warded of This can
be done by careful living. careful diet and a
m uerate use OF a pure stin ulant. To gently rs.
slst nature a stimulant is required something
that adds 10 the life and vigOr. No ling for
THIS purpose can equal pure whiskey, aad 10
should be born In mind that the only pure
and medicinal whisky which has received the
unqualified indorsement o. physicians and
scientists Is Duffy's Pure Malt. IL Is no ordi-
nary whiskey. but possesses properties known
% 10 other article. / 70 win effectually ward
Thousand Of people l. should be rememb mbered,
however, that II ia the only Whiskey which
can accomplish this. and any druggist or
grocer who eeeks 10 convince ycu to the con-
trary is deceiving. Insist upon IA wing
Duffy's Pure Malt.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07
X Kennard&CO
623 Market st.

Monday morning
at $50 o'clock we
commence the closing
sale Of our Spring
Jackets and Refers.
1t seems early to
do this. but having
still large lines on
hand we feel desirous
to have them go out
quickly.
1t is our intention
to sell every garment
and carry none over.
The past winter we
Closed Out Every
Garment we Owned,
and we now propose
to do the same with
our Spring weights
A Spring Wrap is
a great necessity in
our climate.
The goods are all
new, and Of the best
quality
The reductions will
be 10 per cent. off
Ladies who like a
nice fine Black Thibet
Shawl will find in our
stock every good
quality, from $3.50
to $500, single and
double.
Still a few OF
those slightly soiled
Spreads at $1.10,
worth $3.50.
Kennard&CO.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

THR Office holders In convention at
Dover damned the magnificent admins.
ira lon harrison has been giving us
since Blaine got sick, with faint praise
That ia ungratefuli but perhaps they may
have clothes line telegram to the effect
that Harrison caunot be nominated.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

THE Republicans Of Rhode Island kept
their pledges to ex-Speaker Reed and did
not instruct for Harrison. That Is
another instases where the party kept
its pledges With the exception Of those
TO the Protectionist subscribers to the
campaign fund, it is notorious for
breaking pledges
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

The next sketch shows the fashionable
damsel In her theatre gown or q suit.
able enc for little evening gatherings
Foulard silk and lace are the two mater
ials used and In the skirt decoration will
be seen the fashionable ribbon bows
which form 80 important a part Of skirt
decoration just now. The shoulder dec
orStion is lace cape which takes the
place both Of collar ano revers. The ribbon
belt shown In this sketch is a prominent
article Of feminine attire Just now
LIE BARON DE BREMONT.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

THE wages, under the Mckinley bill.
which the New Castle woolen weavers
are luxuriating. actually groaning, under
we're not referred to at the Dover con
vention The speakers referred to indus
tries at distance which ara booming.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

IN Redeem objects TO streamers, II
Worth objects TO trains and all laymen,
everywhere, object to last summers
ssshes as bows, pray what shall pretty
girl wear to attract attention and make
herself ug'yi
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

TIE Philadelphia Ledger has weak
ened on its hastily conceived aud falsely
maintained position that TIE Democratic
party IS silver crszy party. That is
well; 1t is never necessary to mIsquote
or misinterpret an opponent.
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

We are pleased to observe that the
speech Of Senator Higgins at Dover ex
hibits less pessimistic bitterness and
partisan observation or distortion Of
facts than his speeches have exhibited
heretofors. BE has accepted the advice
Of the EVENING JOURNAL There is still
room for improvement We are sorry TO
note that be had adopted SMILES and used
language which are generally excluded
from polite society and never used by
educated men Such an expression as I'VE
have climbed mp on their backs and will
not let go is from the prize ring or the
circus ring. At best there isa rine
about IL that is not genteel. Speaking
to the comprehension Of a certain class
Of men It may be difhcult for Senator
Higgins TO Be dIgni6ed or polite, but still
he should do himself the credit Of trying
Evening journal., 1892-05-07

In Wyoming. not having any negroes
to cajele and deceive, the Republicans
magnanimously and CALAMITY supplied
their places as alternstes to the Mime
apolis convention with women. Is II
possible that the Republicans love their
wives and daughters next to the negrOes9
We supposed that their dogs were the
next In succession as heirs.