Richmond dispatch. [volume] (Richmond, Va.) 1884-1903, 1892-07-24
MAIDENS ON WHEELS
LADY eIcycLERs IN WASHINGTON
AND HuMoRS OF THE SPORT.
wheelmen's National Convention Con-
gre.srncn who Ride the whcei-Criti-
cal and Phiiosophic observations.

| WASHINGTON, ID, O.. July 23.--The average
! citizen may not know that there are twenty
| congressman who ride bicycles, and but
few persons appreciate tho artistic merits
/ of great statesman on wheels, all OF
which are peculiar features of picturesque
/ Washington.
Having over one hundred miles OF
smooth streets ard beautiful stretches
of winding roads through lovely parks.
Of course this is the wneelmen's paradise.
where all varieties Of riders may be seen,
from the demon messenger flying AZ twenty
miles an hour to the strong-mlndeu ieinale
bent on grim purpose, Darwinian coon,
o colored wash-lady. and evena moon-eyed
jap. And II is here that the wheelmen's
| convention is meeting. One OF the pref
test sights IN the world is romantic
couple-dude and maiden-gracefully
wheeling towards some sylvan retreat Tar
away lin the sombre boskage OF tine
wood" pursuing happiness At an am ping
| mace of fifteen miles an hour, and looking
as if they we're sure OF catching 1t. Wash
! ingtoniaps natives and translents. sit on
tho stoops in the breezy evenings
and enjoy II all, for these be charming and
diyerting sights. But finer than all IL ex-
Speaker Reed on the wheel, with his coat
tails dallying with the wind ana DIS siiken
thirds the way around his rotund torso.
| THE ed,for rN please note ne enclosed Gftddrd
10 his fact tetch has not Vet gone into history
and oIgkfto be reserUed for he uerdcious ctT0nl-
cler. Blu Nye)
In the language of the circus. poster.
| this superb phenomenon must be Beeu
to be appreciated" In fact, TO tully APP
preciate the ex-Czar on wheel, one must
have gotten q grip with his imagination on
the splendid smile OF the elephant on
tight-rope ,,
Yesterday 1000 wheclmen and wheel
| ladies lighted on the town from all d.
reetions. and regard ess of the sacred Sab
bath Immediately jumped on 1000 BICYCLES
| and secured the burg in every duecuoh'
causing grave statesmen 10 pause on .ne
wav to church and altogether paralyZing
| pietv. There were decorated dudes from
Hosh Kosh aud Kalamazoo, strong; minded
females from Vassar, summer girls, GAN
forpians. Hoosers, seven +. +. V. col
leglans OF the "Pooahontas Club" three
Sophomore coons from Oberin Uni
versity. and but no mortal scribe
could do justice TO the show Inc
p,ece de resistance Of the impromptu carni-
val was troop of 800 in military torina-
zion marching slowly and preceded by a
naonifcept band that filed the ar with
insnlrinp strains which made fellow reel
like going TO war again 10 hear the thun-
der of Mars and smell yillainous saltpetre ;
yea. marry, and with pretty rICdndt9es on
bicycles.
THE MAIDEN on THR WHEEL.
Painters have limned beauty in all
characters, sculptors have made emgle5 OF
goddesses and nympbs that were divine,
and poets have sung of web-tooteh mer-
maids and piscatoral SIRENS, put al tne
music may now prepare TO take shy at
the rarest specimen of feminine beauty
that artistic genius ever tackled. Having
studied her all day yesterday instead or
as usual. gong to church twice, and
observing the effect she produced on
statesmen. ! retired with deilgDtiully
excited imagination and glided on INTO
dreamland with increasing swttness until
anon ] thought myself the winged
Mercury, tutelar god of newspaper-nien
and thieves. with wheels instead OF wings,
but hying through the rosy depths OF
space like Flammarlon's imp OF the moon,
and down seven-colored rainbow 10 the
ton Of ParnassuS, where Fame sat hOidlng
a wreath for the beautiful aufhoress Oh
that wicked little book, who came tolilhg
mn the ascent on a wheel, and awoke al
a resounding clap of thunder. The col
ored Mercury OF the National HOteI was
pounding the door
What the d are you doing that ior'
yOu--"
Three ladies on de flo done ring up de
Office sab, TO say dey can't sleep Tor dc
snorin' in l70"
" You son of Erebus. bring 179 cup OF
nectar Bourbon, not rye, and don't masn
the mint"
MYSTERY AND CoQUETRY.
This is G A. NJ. and / go and knock Of
the door of General D., of Arkansas, the
gentleman who passed the Nicaragua bill
through Congress- soldier, statesman,
and sportsman, distinguished IN all three
of those branches, and, of course, phi
losopher,
After he heard the impressions and the
dream we got Professor Martin, big leu
! ton-American of Chicago, who manages
the art end of the Worlds Fair, and went
down and stood on the stOop in front Of
the National. where scores of dude riders
were posed TO give the eaTly-mornIng far
sex a benefit. But our trio OF phl!Oso-
piers took no account of them. We were
LAYING for the girl on wheels. The Gen-
eral, who Is distinguished oear-hunter'
stood mOtloness and silent, as II on the
edge of the cane-break waiting for his
tayorite game The Professor put on his
glasses Ike an art critic. Presently
there was faint whirr. and sud
denly. like a bevy of piover, seven of
them came skimmlng up to the
curb. escorted by q tall dude on
| whose belt were lne NoIus hhil"ni"A'o'
Michigan" in gilt letters. All the seven
oiris cave an unseen kick, and the tall
Nicbieauder caught the wheels and
stalked them on the curb. Then the
seven rosv maidens gave a bird-llke hutter
to arrange their pretty feathers. All this
WAS done in a second and nobody had seen
the tip OF a foot. Then they jauntlly
staggered into the drugstore and went 10
drinking pink soda water Whine the dude
NGrhipander stood looking like thirsty
ostrich lust of the desert OF Sarah Ann.
What do YOU think of that" / said 20
the General. who had been taking sports
manlike view of the performance.
Il don't quite know" replied that dis
tlncuished hunter. They are quick on
the wing. and run on the ground like a
kldeer, but | can't whether they are Weo-
footed or not, and as don't detect any
perfume or see their tracks, l couldn't tell
how to trail EN-
Then he added, after thoughtfully put
ting his glasses IN his pocket lust WISH
| had my bear-dog, old Nlmrod, here.
They couldn't fool him.
The Professor was admlrlng the scene
with an artists eye as the girls would take
sip OF pink soda-water and gracefully
throw back their heads and let 1t gurGle
down tire seven swan-like throats exactly
like the swans IN the lake at Soldiers
Home when they sail up to the little trick
ling fountain. dip their bills in the spark
ling water, and make sweeping letter )
with the neck. like Hogarth's line OF
beauty.
THE SECRET.
Having experience with Sunday Wash
ington visitors. / walked up to the Michi-
pander and remarked with an off-hsnd air +:
"You don't seem 20 like soda-water."
you've got straight tip on that" he
answered IN a tone of arid melancholy.
Come to me-" No time was to DO
wasted in words. After the refreshing
ceremony said to the Michigander: .,
lift is possible for gratitude to dwell
in the breast of Kalamazoo dude, tell me
quichly how can young lady do all That
without showing a footF"
You won't give it away"
Trust me blindly." | exclaimed IN q
husky whisper. 1t will only appear IN
TaE RICHMOND DISPATCH and be copied by
all the others"
1--WE have match with Chicago for
lady riders-World's fair, you know. You
know Chicago girl has the longest and
biggest --"
Don't mention it."
~ ell" saws the Miehigander, with a
[ diabolical leer of mingled triumph aud re-