Mississippi leader. (Jackson, Miss.) 1892-1895, 1892-10-13
CIDER
a True story.


place. cider two or three days old
hasn't enough alcohol in it to hurt a
fly. and you'd be most awfully sick
before you'd be drunk.
Uncle Ray knew all about every
thing; of course lie knew all about
cider. So all of the assembled family
decided Immediately that cider was a
good temperance drink; on the
strength of which decision another
pitcherful was sent for to wash down
the pumpkin-pies.
1t was Abijah who started the cider
question. lie was just from the acad-
cmv, where he had been studying the
effects of Alcohol ON the human
system" aud be was-sU certain of his
facts. that, although he felt rather
crushed under the overwhelming maa-
date uf Uncle Rays knowledge, he
still felt lurking doubt of the truth
of the general decision. But grand
mas birthday was not the time for an
argument, so Abijah drank his extra
glass Of cider, and consoled his
wounded feelings with Cousin Camil-
las pretty face and sweet converse
! ton, much sweetcr than the sweet
est cider, he was secretly sure.
/ 1t was nearly four O'clock when
grandpa said it was time to harness J m
to the carryall. to fake Uncle Ray tn
! The station.
"D1n't WaIt to hurry you, nay boy,
! said grandpa. "but ii yOu want tn
i catch Your train yon'!l have t" move
aloHg."
IL must catcll it," SqiI uncle, excl
. teddy jumping Hp, ''t1r il means the
: loss of five thousand dollars to ne if
don't"
"Well, we'll, don't you get excited
now" laughed grandpa. Tray, YOU are
are greatest hop toad ever did see:
always jumping like jack on IA
/ string. Quicksilver's slow to you.
Bat there's plenty of time. 81 isn't
the SlOwest hand to harness, nor drive
either; and Jim is first-ratc travel
err"
Bat Uncle Ray was in hustle that
nothing could slow, and made Aunt
Jane put on her things, and kiss ev-
erybodY oOd-by, almost before 81
started from the house. He himself
attended to the big basket full of tur-
key and chicken, cranberry sauce.
cruilers, pumpk pies, and all the
other good things that New England is
famous for in general, and grandma
and Aunt Martha were famous for in
particular.
Uncle Ray never went home with
ont a basket. He said that he had
married the l0vlicst woman under the
san, but she couldn't cook worth Il
copper. Her pies were always fail
urc, and her crnllCrs likec annon balls
He.declared that he always saw grand
ma. in mob cap and very shor
skirt, dancing Il highland fling ovcl
Aunt Maula's PROSTATE body when
ever he had dared to try one; he ncv-
er ventvred Oh more than one.
When the carryall came to the door
there WAS great shouting and laugh
ing among ;hc young folks, who hat
gone in :, hpdy 10 see C1GsiE III har
ness up. jim had been found in The
cider yard. with his head in the tub o
choice cider that had been put to on,
side for the family drinking; aud, o
course there was no more cider in thu
tub.
| Abijah, when he found what he hat
done, watched him carefully; but jim
stood rs soberly as tub OF water, anC
Abijah WAS almost convinced tina
Uncle Ray was right.
"Surely," thought he, ga tub of CT
der ought to effect even horse, j
there is any alcohol in it at all.
know they HAYES ONE brains, for have
seen 'em. Books do lie, | know
jim proceeded with his load briskly
enough for mile or two, indeed NOR,
briskly than usual, then he began t.
slow up perceptibly, slower and slow
cr. al Consin Sis persuusions were
useless. In vain he flourished thu
reins and cracked his whip; it had M
terrors for Jim. In vain Uncle RAJ
shouted "get up in stentorian tones
hasten he wound not, and suddenl,
he stopped altogether.
"Well, | never !" said cousin 81
slim never behaved this way before
| guess I'll get out and see if he hasn'
stone ia his foot"
"But | havn't the time" declared
Uncle Ray. eve ought to be there
now"
sob, well f! if Jim is all right HI
will get you there in time. Ans
you see for yourself, uncle, he won'
go as he is" said 81.
But when he got out, and went to Sc,
aftsr the stone that WAS in Jim's shoe
Jim deliberately laid down in til,
shafts, breaking one of them IN his
descent, and went sound asleep,-
snored, in fact. Here was dilemma
Two miles from the station, and the
train due in twenty five minutes. Ub
Gle Ray fairly danced in despairinl
wrath.
"There isn't any use in talking
said 81. "Jinl's dead drunk. and he
won't wake up for an earthquake.
tell you what, you will just have
to foot it. and leave Aunt Jane to &c
back with me for the night. Wen &C
over here to Browns, and get his bug.
! gy and drive home.p
1t wasn't much of a prospect. bot II
was the best that could be done; Sc
Uncle Ray started. 1t was a regular
country road, and Uncle Ray wasn't
the thnnest man in the world; but
there was five thousand dollars to
gain or lose, and he did his best; now
tripping over root, now falling INTO
a hole, now in>the middle of the road.
and now on the side, he made excel
lent time, and reached New Plym-
0uth Just in time to see the train go