Evening star. [volume] (Washington, D.C.) 1854-1972, 1892-10-26
MR.. AND MRS. BOwsER,
The Responsibility for the Condition Of Mr..
Bowser's Wearing Apparel.


Bowser's Wearing Apparel.
From the New York Sun
Mr.. Bowser had left the house at noon smiling
and laughing and waving his hand at youns
Bowser. Five hours later he stalked stiffly NJ
the steps, -stalked down the hall into the bacl
parlor, and, standing before Mrs. Bowser ant
pointing to the left-hand side of his collar, b,
sternly said
''Mrs. Bowser, look at that!''
''At what, dear?" she queried.
Cant you see? Couldn't a blind man see il
forty rods away?"
sis it your collar? You mean it's frayed out
little mite on the fold?''
"A little mite Why the whole thing is q
mass of rags and tatters. and I've had 10 run
the gauntlet of a thousand people this after.
noon. Ii there was ever house run on a worse
system than this I'd like to hear of it, Nc
head-nO tail-no body! Plenty of husbands
in my situation would commit some rash act
THERE"
Mr.. Bowser tore off the collar and threw il
on the floor and jumped on it, and then picked
1t up and flung it out of the window.
'You should be more careful calmly OBJ
served Mrs. Bowser as he stood glaring at her.
You have at least two dozen"
Il should be more careful! What have got
to do with it?''
"You have at least two dozen collars in your
dresser. That was probably the only frayed
one in the lot You should examine a collar
before putting it on. You rushed up and put
that collar on while l was still at luncheon,
and l found the one you took off lying in the
lavatory."
That's it, Try to wriggle out! 1 suppose
you are not to blame that haven't got but one
solitary suspender button left on these trousers,
and that had to go into hardware store and
buy horse nails before could get home. Just
think Of it-ho:se nails, Mrs. Bowser. and here
they are-three of emf
"Yes, see. Those buttons are patent, and
can only be put on by tailor. A month ago 1
wrapped that pair up and told YOU to leave 'em
at the tailor's. You went upstairs and put
them on and rushed of, and never saw
them"
"And this shirt-you are not to blame for
this shirt?' he demanded, thinking it wise to
let up on horse nails.
whats the matter with your shirt? This is
the first complaint I've heard"
matter? Can't you see? It's lopsided! It's
squeegawed! It's turned top to bottom, and
has been trying to climb over my head all the
afternoon! II this house had head-if this
house had head, Mrs. Bowser, my shirts"
LET me see what's wrong" she interrupted,
as she rose up and turned down the collar
Of his coat. mo wonder you feel nervous
You have buttoned the top button into the
lower buttonhole. It's funny you couldn't tell
what was wrong. That's you oil over'
Mrs Bowser, who buttoned that shirt that
way?" he hoarsely whispered.
"You did, of course. didn't even know
when you changed"
"And perhaps cut that hole in NV pocket2''
he sarcastically queried a, he turned one OF his
coat pockets wrong side out.
'That is no cut, Mr.. Bowser. The whole has
been worn there by something. Take your coat
of and I'll mend it in Q minute"
And look at this haiti he went on az he
brought it from the hall tree-'.just look at itI
Isn't that an evidence that this house IL run on
about the same system as windmill?"
81 see. The sweat band is missing found
it in the hind pocket Of pair Of your trousers
the other day. You should have stopped at the
tailors. There is also dent in the crown. You
probably did II while getting into the street car
Mr.. Bowser felt himself beaten, but made nm
his mind 10 die hard.
perhaps ought TO have stopped st the
tailors to get these socks repaired" he said. "a
he kicked of his shoes and exhibited three toes
on each foot out TO the weather.
Where did you get them?" she asked.
You laid them out on o chair for me 70 put
~ laid them out on chair to be mended. sud
though you have seven or eight pairs in the
drawer you put these on, of coursei''
Mr. Bowser put on his shoes Then IL re-
turned his hat 10 the rack. Then be unbut-
toned his vest to see IL the horrA nsils ,vers
still there, and said:
mrs. Bowser, am q patient, uncomplain-
ing husband and never find any fault uuIevs
driven to extremes. / win overlook your neg
hgence this time, but let this be = solemn warn
ing and great moral lesson 70 soa for ysan TO
come