Waterbury evening Democrat., 1892-01-08
A CONDUCTORS REVENGE.
He Carried Pennies for Those Who Gave
 Him Big Bills.

ne NarTled FennleS Tor Those Who Gave Him Big Bills.
 There is a particularly bright young conductor on Broadway car who has d scheme for revenge upon persons who give him large bills to change that never fails to give him ample satisfac. tion for the trouble they cause. While riding upon his car the other evening he described his scheme and then grati- lied my curiosity by an example of practical application.
 When l first boarded the car hand. ed him ten cent piece, which he re- turned with polite request for pen- nies l had nearly quarters worth, which he took, giving me silver in ex- change He thanked me and ask him why he wanted such small coin
 "Oh," said he, 1T collect them for fel- lows who give me large bills to change See here," he continued displaying a pocket half full of the copper nuisances: some fellow will give me five-dollar bill before reach Forty-second street, I'll bet. Then I will get square by giv- ing him at least fifty pennies"
 The young conductor was not amiss in his calculations. for when the car ar. rived opposite an uptown theater, a well-dressed young man, accompanied by woman, boarded the car
 The passenger fun bled in his pockets half minute and then drew out two. dollar bill. Sorry, but that is the smallest l have" he told the conductor. All right" replied the latter, 'I can change it." and returning to the rear platform he counted out seventy-fve pennies, four quarters, one five cent piece and a dime. These he handed to the passenger. The lat ter said nothing, but gave the conductor an awful look and placed the money in his pocket.
 Hardly two blocks further on an old lady boarded the car and rendered a five dollar bill for d five cent fare. The conductor went through the perform ance second time, but with different results The old lady ragged and threat ened to report him to the superintend- ent The conductor replied politely that he had no other change. Well. then, said the old lady. give me the bill back and take your pennies" The conductor did so, aud then the lady pro- duced a nickel.
 There are fully two hundred people who board my car every day." said the conductor, ''who give me two, five and even ten-dollar bills. I do not object to the first, but l draw the line at the sec- ond and refuse to change the third Inc only way have to get square is by glVlng pennies, and you may rest as- sured that 1 am never without them.
 "l remember not long ago another woman gave me twenty-dollar bill. It happened to be payday, and my sal ary, together with about a quart of small change, just made that amount. Well, l gave her the change, which, by the way, filled her hand satchel, and small bills. She said she would tell tho superintendent, but she didn't, and have never seen her since."-N. Y. Her. ald.
 Childioh Instinct.
 To get the values of things is the ar lists greatest labor. It is for that his eye is quicker to observe than his neigh bor's. It is for that he mixes and re- mixes his colors; it is for that he lays them on and rubs them off to try again for an effect nearer truth; it is for that he is always ''squinting'' at nature. In view of these facts "values" would seem to be an essence as evasive as inn portant. And yet children sometimes get at them instinctively and with as- tonishing accuracy. For instance: The other day lady went to visit friend, the mother of two little boys. She had not been seen by the lads for at least a year and half, but they had been told she was coming. After the first strangeness of meeting was over, the younger of the brothers warmed into confidential relations, and said: "You've been away so long didn't know you; I couldn't tell how you looked" 'You could not" replied the lady, in tone of assumed surprise. We'll turning to the elder child, she said: You remem- bered me, I am sure" 70, yes,'' re- turned the boy, confidently, and there was something of contempt in his voice as he added; Why, haven't you got on the same clothes2"-Boston Herald
 Always Go Together
 There's fool somewhere in the neirhburhood,