The Democratic press. [volume] (Ravenna, O. [Ohio]) 1868-1901, 1892-11-23

1t needs no bloodhound to get on the
trail of the girl of the period. PUCK.
An exploded theory didn't know
it was loaded. p Union County Stand
ard.
A whisky straight" is decided to be
an unmixed evil.-Binghan'ton Rep'so-
ltcGss.
Only those who think themselves of
the elect get angry when you say there
is no hell.-LJe.
In the nature of things two lovers
must fall in love before they can fall
out.-Dallas Nescs.
The sculptor isn't the kind of man
that cuts ne figure in the world
B;nghGn,ton Leader.
A mans idea of practicing economy
Is to preach it three times day to his
wife.-Atchison Globe.
"Another cherished link gone" said
the young man who lost his cuff but
tom Washington Star.
Jagson says there are lots of men
who start for heaven too late to get
past quarantine.-Et'n Gazette.
When a wife hears a dull thud on
the doorstep she knows that the lodge
has adjourned Binghanato1s Repu6-
lican.
A long face in church and short
measure in trade are two things that
never help the cause of God q Bit
RAMS Horn.
Buy q mans good will and you will
find each time you have occasion to
ask it that the price has gone up
Atchison Globe.
A sufferer from a severe cough says
that his complaint has one of the mod
ern improvements pneumatic tire.
-LoDetI Courier.
Happiness is good deal like money;
q great many persons who nave II
coming to them are cheated out OF IL.
--Atchis01s Globe.
20, dry up!" as autumn said to the
leaf. "I'm not as green as i was, re-
piled the leaf, $50 I'll take your adj
vice.-TerGs Siftings.
If there is anything which will make
a Young man query whether evolution
is not a failure it is to see a pretty girl
kiss pug dog.-Ieras SLttt7gs.
The time has come when the caudi-
date feels bound to treat with famlll
arity every body that happens to be II
the Philadelphia Times.
Lucie-aNed made ringing speech
last night, mommer." Mommer-
sUm-umP@ Lucie-@Yes. FL
asked me to be his wife. e."-JeaOeter'
CirculGr.
Hicks-"What did you ever see about
Ticker to make you think he was {
millionairep" Dix-"Cracker anc
cheese crumbs in his coat pocket. -
N. Y. Herald.
Tom: @May kiss youP" Sally
@They say kissing tends to the propa
cation of microbes" Tom: well
you can kiss me, then-Tm not afraic
of 'em."--Puck.
Mr.. Toothandnail-"I can't imagine
what we ever got married for; we're
totally different at every single point
Mrs. Toothandnail-"O, you Hatterer.
Boston Courier.
Jack-"Come with me to the theate
this evening, TomP" Tom-"Bu
you're going to take Alice Murray.
Jack-sYes. and her aunt. "-Kat
FIELDS Washington.
He-"Tve been engaged in des
perate Irritation, but I'm tired of it
and wish the girl would gently drol
me- She--"Then, why don't yo1
propose to her. Life.
It is not always the man who look
the wisest who knows the most, bu
most people don't know this. SO it Wi
pay you to look just as wise as so
ao~
Visitor-"And so you went to th
theater last week. What did you seeF
Little Girl 10, there was lots of mi
sic, an lots of bathing. but ther
wasn't any water. Good Neaos.
II recently performed four marriag
ceremonies in twenty minutes" re
marked the Rev. DR.. Thirdly. "Ths
was at the rate of twelve knots a
hour, added Miss Flyp.-1tt-B BITS.
Unfashionable mother: "What
sweet child! How old is sheP" Fasl
ionable mother: well, really, if yo
are going to ask that sort of questic
I'd better send for the nurse!"-Punc
Dunn-Browne: II should like to fe
that when die leave the world be
ter than 1 found it. Jackson: IN
dear fellow. am quite sure the wor
will be better when you are gone."-
Judy.
Brown (who is very proud of his a
gumentative powers): 81 always ca
~ my pint" Gray: II think I ha'
seen you when you were carrying
good deal more than that. ."-Bosto
Transcript.
Barker Tin the surf): Come on i
Hicks Hicks: @Can't! Can't swi1
Besides. I'm feeling dizzy this NOR
ing" Barker: "Come on. You'll
al right if your head swims. ."-Ha
per's Bazar.
He-"Why is it that men are not
given to saying spiteful things of 9th
members of their sex as women are
She-"I suppose it is because they a
too busy Dragging about themselves
Indianapolis journal.
Wife: II want to talk with "
about some things we need for t
house." Husband: what are they
Wife: "Well, to begin with, des
don't you think we need new bo
netp"-Detroit Free Press.
papa" asked little Ethel, after
6CoSOH Va UCOP OuSAts uAu yOu ia
any idea that would go right alol
living with you and being your daug
ter the first time we were introduced
indianapolis Journal.
@Does poetry pay?" asked the you
man. "Yes," replied the edit'
@You see, most poets send stamps
the return of rejected manuscript
"Of course" "Well, 1 keep t
stamps. y Washington Star.
The Boston girl never hollers shell
at the mouth of telephone. S
simply says, as she puts the receiv
to her ear, II take the liberty of 6
dressing you via wire surcharg
with electricity."-Teros Siftings.
Governess (reading)-@And befc
an Indian goes on the war-path
adorns his belt with locks of hum
hair and paints his face" Small B
-"Why, Miss Passy, that's what y
do-only you put the hair on yo
head. Funny Folks.
Al don't believe in long enga!
ments," said young man to strs
ger with whom he had struck up