The Worthington advance. [volume] (Worthington, Minn.) 1874-1908, 1892-02-18
ON A WESTERN ROAD.

Passenger Who Was New to Rail-
roads.
He got on at water tank. He was
lean and lank, and was dressed in a
suit of clothes of antediluvian date,
which showed by the many wrinkles in
the long-tailed coat and the bouquet
which was waited through the car as
he deposited his body along. side Of me,
that the suit had laid away in a cam
phor-wood chest for a: least decade.
After he had deposited on the floor OF
the car his old-fashioned carpet bag,
which closed up like an accordion as
soon as he released his hold on the
handles, he grasped with both hands
the arm of the seat, and. turning q
half-frightened face toward me, re.
marked, in hoarse whisper Am I
right?" l told him l thought he was,
and was about to resume my paper
when he said: Amt it nice?" OF
course I replied in the affirmative,
thought had not the remotest idea to
what he alluded. Noticing that he still
held on to the arm of the seat with the
tenacity of a wood-tick, asked for an
explanation. to which he replied:
II amt going to take any chances in
having the liver shook out of me
by any new-fangled stage coach. I've
rid few hundred miles on stages in
my time"
But my friend" put in yourhumble
servant, "a railway train is not like .
stage. Didn't you ever ride on . train
Of cars bcfore?"
NO" he replied. II never saw one
afore to-day"
"Where do you live, when you're at
homer"
up in the mountains. Came across
the plains in 80. Have lived in the
mountains ever since"
BY this time the train had started,
and my new acquaintance could not
conceal his surprise at the smoothness
with which the cars glided over the
rails, and he remarked:
''She runs pretty slick. doesn't she?"
'Of course. There is no necessity
for you to hold on to the seat the way
you do"
Don't you have any corduroy roads
on this Gne?"
"Of course not. It runs Just as
smooth as this all the time.'
Doesn't the fellow what runs the
business kind of whip up the leaders
when he goes over a gully?"
I'VE have no leaders on railway,
nor do we have gullies to shake the
teeth out of person"
"And it runs like this all the time?"
Eyes, of course"
Ny new acquaintance was just about
to remark, Its nice, isn't it," when
the train came to a very sudden stop.
In fact, it was too sudden to be pleas.
ant shot through window, and the
last l saw of my friend he was going
through the roof of the car with = por.
ton of the seat in his hands at q very
rapid rate. Just as he was disappear.
ing he called back to me in reproachful
tones:
Il thought you said the blamed thing
ran smooth? This beats corduroy roads
and gulliea. I'm going back to the
mountains"
On more occasions than one it ha.
been demonstrated beyond doubt tina,
1t is absolutely impossible for two
trains going in opposite directions tc
pass each other on the same track, and
I can not see for the life of me why
railroads still persist in making the ex'
periment--Harvey Brown, j.. in Jury.
He Bobs Up serenely
From bod whose liver is ali right. The bill
ious subject rises slowly, YEARLY, with
sensation Of langu0r and nausea after
night of unrest His skin and eyeballs ar
sallow, his right side bothers him, his tongu,