davidaulloa/AmericanStories huggingface dataset:
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
RI. Mndsrn Cus.a.n.

Jones-Did you hang up your stock.
ing this Christmas?
Brown twho has many friends, ETC.,
to provide for)-No; ! hung up my
wstch.--Yale Record
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23

Little Boy-I'm glad I'm goin' to
church tomorrow.
Good Ministcr-l am delighted TO hear
that. You love to 60 TO church., don't
you?
Little Boy-Ycs, indeed. ] always get
SO hungry that dinner tastes twice as
pood.-Good News.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23

Mamie--Let's play its Christmas,
, and I'll be Santa Claus.
Minnie--All right. Then you'll come
and give inc a whole lot OF beautiful
presents.
Mamie-Wil /? Oh, no, Minnie; I'll
let you be Santa Claus, as you are my
guest. Golden Days.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
Good Cause Tor Pride.

Butler-Say, John, what makes you
look SO Jolly to-dayP Have you won
the big prize in the lottery
Cab Driver (whose stccd Is very an
cient)-No, but ] was fined five dollars
this morning Tor driving too Fast
Euronean Exchange.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23

1--WE doctors have the advantage OF
you ~clergymen; we practice while you
only preach"
Very true; we can only tell people
TO go to Heaven, but you send them
| life.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
The Unreliable Sex.

Gus De Smith-The young ladies at
the present day are no good. They CANT
be relied on.
Kosciusko Jones-What makes you
think 50?
Gus-I mn engaged to three young
ladies, and they all firt with other men.
Texas Stftings.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
school Ventilation.

Mammals your new school well ven
tilated?
Little Girl-Our room isn't, but the
room next TO ours is.
."How do you known"
"The childrcns in that room all has
colds in their heads. Good News.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23

CloseAst--I saw in the paper TINT your
son had accepted q situation.
Hanks-He did-acccpted It philo-
sophically; he was fred. Truth.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
TO He Q Alone.

Doctor tear at patients cheSsl-Thh
swelling here must be reduced ~ onee.
Patisnt-Co slow, doc, that swelling
hsppsns TO be my pocketbooks-Trsth-
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
Not Quite FREQ.

New Arrival-Oi waz towld this was
o fres country.
Friend-Well, isn'tit II?
New Arrival--Indade It Is not. Oh
| had to sthay ut Sandy Hook foive days
an then be fumygated befar Oh cnd get
| on the police foorce.-N. Y. Weekly.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
Tho Henson why.

"well." said the baseball captain,
''our cake is dough-"
GLOW do you account for it""
1--WE haven't n good battcr."-Dem'
orest's Magazine.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23

she took q single sheet md wrote
How much she loved him on II,
And then sho added fMlf o
About that autumn bonnet
IN. Y. Herald
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23

.Judkins-I saw Sommers drunk last
night. What's the mattcrP He's going
TO the dogs.
Mudkins-Hc proposed TO two women
this season.
Judkins--Ah, yes. Got rejected. OF
course?
Mudkins-No; accepted by both.
Judge.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
Aus Compliments,

al wish those horrid mosquitoes would
let me alone" said mamma.
II don't blame EN-, mamma" re-
turned Abncr. you're pretty sweet"
-Harpcr's Young People.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23

Irate Passenger--Madam, what do
you mean by letting that brat snatch
Off my wig?
Mother with sigh Of relicf)-Oh, it's
n wig, is itp | was afcarcd fur a minute
that he'd scalpt yo alivc.-Life.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
Proxided stamp AccompAaAsd Il.

IT tell yoa," he said, diseonsolately,
'swomen aSe altogether tao business
like nowadays"
"What's the matter%"
81 proposed to the heirsss yesterday"
"Did she accept you@"
"No She took ont her notebook
wrote my name and address In II ana
said she would consider my appliea'
ton. 'SBoston GlobA
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
only {. Matter Of Endurance.

"You are standing on my foot,
ma'am,' said a big, g~ood-natured man
In the crowd at the eorner OF State and
Madison, to a lady IN front Of him.
''Sirv she replied, haughtily, turning
her head. ~ haven't moved In my
tracks for half an Aour!'
II know IL, ma'am," he rejosned.
''But the foot you've been standing on
all that time has begun to get tired.
Would you mind occupying the ether
one awhile?"-Chicago Tribune.
why He Was Late.
"Why are you 20 late, Jack?" ssked
the boys mother ON his return from
school.
II was kept in,- replied Jack
"Whispering again%
"No, IN was kept In for MT talk
Ing"
show was THAR"
The jography teacher asked me .
question, and1 never said Q word
Harper's Young People.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
An Instance Given.

Teacher-Does heat always expand
and cold always contract?
Tommy Taddles-Cold expands some
times.
"Indeed? What does cold cxpand?"
'Coal bills."--Detroit Free Press.
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23
BAD OUTLOOK FOR A CHICKEN DIN
NEH.
- =

Deacon Watson-Doan' yo' t'ink Il
crule ter keep dat dog chained up all
de time?
Farmer Smithers-Oh, I let him loose
Mt ni1ht!-Puck. ,
The Red Cloud chief., 1892-12-23

Uncle Seth LoQui.
tur.l
GOO old fash.
toned Chris
with the logs
u the hearth,
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02
Halibut In Plenty.

The fishing schooner Surprise, Captain
James Bell commanding, which sailed
from Astoria in November for the pur-
pose of prospecting the coast of Alaska
and the Alexander archipelago in hopes
of finding banks where halibut could he
taken during the winter, returned to
Astoria Saturday. She cruised around
till April, visiting every point whers
there was prospect of finding halibut
and setting travis in many places with
out success until on the Sth of April, af-
ter rounding Cape Chacon, on Prince
Edward island, the most southwesterly
point of Alaska, the first run of halibut
was encountered.
The fish were so plentiful and easily
caught that Captain Bell, foreseeing his
supply of ice was to run short, hove
away to the northeast and headed W
Frederick's sound for the Lacont glacier
which was reached after two days
run, and on the 18th, with the hold full
of ice. sail was made, and the 18th found
the Surprise again off Cape Chacon
standing off and on, with set lines anG
travis out, and the sea fairly alive with
halibut Some idea can be formed as tx
how plentiful the fish were from tht
fact that in two days Captain Bell, hi
two sons and an Indian caught, cleaned
and packed in the ice ten and half toni
of halibut.-Portland Oregonian.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02
A Monster wrought Iron Chimney.

Creusot, France, has the most gigantic
iron chimney that has as yet been con-
structed in the world. 1t is funnel shaped,
big end down. % feet in diameter at the
bottom and tat the top. 1t Ia exactly 2T9
feet and inches high, the total weight,
exclusive Of the masonry foundation, being
80 tons. The stonework OF the foundation
extends SO feet beneath the surface, feet
inches above before the cap rock was put
on preparatory to putting on the iron
work, the total weight Of the stone used
being 800 tons. The iron shaft Of the main
structure was carried up in successive
rings, each ring averaging 4 feet | inch in
height. The thickness Of the iron used
varied from g-l6 OF an inch ut the base to
u of an inch at the top. The lower rings
of the chimney were formed Of plates
each, the upper ones OF plates each, the
heaviest plates weighing 800 pounds each
and the lightest ones 800 pounds each.-St.
Louis Republic.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02
DEMOCRATIC NORTHWEST, NAPOLEON. o, JUNE q 1892
ODDS AND ENDS


New York has 1900 telegraph boys
A Bradford mill makes 100000 tooth
picks day.
The night;jar has cry like one lament
ing in distress
A century ago there were only fourteen
newspapers In London.
Rutherford B. Hayes once canvassed for
''Baxter's Saints Rest"
Take fresh paint out Of wearing apparel
by rubbing with gasoline.
Milton always composed with his head
thrown far back, generally with closed
eyes
The price Of quinine in quantities Of
10000 ounces is about twenty cents per
ounce.
The difference In time between London
and New York is 4 hours IS minutes So
seconds.
London possesses a Baldheaded club,
where bright and shining craniums alone
are seen.
1t has been recently shown that single
silkworm can produces yield of 1000 yards
of thread.
Let no drinks be brought in large tum-
blers or glasses; little ones are far more
acceptable.
There are people in the church who hurt
the cansc OF God whenever they say a word
in its favor.
The horse whose trappings are fine steps
more proudly than the animal whose har-
ness is mean.
A Presbyterian pastor at Greenville, H.,
has pulpit inside of olive wood from the
Mount of Olives.
When angry the czar runs his fingers
through his hair or lays his hand fat on
the top of his head.
lis proposed to police Pennsylvania av-
enue, Washington, with patrolmen who
are over six feet high.
The love that is right itself will not
spend much of its time in looking for
black spots On other people.
The number of dead animals removed
from the streets of New York city in 1891
was 1894, being an increase of 6,94S over
1890.
The japanese government is about to
unite all it's islands by means of submarine
telegraph cables, at an estimated cost Of
$2,00o,000
Cracks in furniture may be filled with
Indian red or burnt umber to get the de
sired shade. When dry it will take on
equal polish.
In the gold refinery of Raphael G. Sons
Limehouse, England-said to be the largest
in the world-as much as 5000 is recov
cred from one years SCOT alone.
John Forbes, of Kamilche, Wash, while
hunting the other day, saw pheasant OF
log He took aim, fired and killed th'
pheasant, and at the same time accidental
ly shot fine steer in the head, killing il
INSTANTLY
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02
A Fasting Pig.

The terrific storm of March 2, 1892, will
long be remembered all over the north
west. A black pig weighing about 200
pounds. belonging to A. Weberg, under
took, with help of the storm, to outdo the
celebrated DIR. Tanner in the way Of living
without food, and there is little doubt but
that he would have succeeded had he not
been disturbed.
When the storm was over Mr.. Weberg
looked about his place and found every
thing all right except the pig in question,
which was missing. A thorough search
was instituted, but the pigs whereabouts
was not disclosed Mr.. Weberg finally
gave it up and thought OF course that the
pig had perished In the storm and was
buried In the snow. Thursday, the snow
having nearly gone, Mr.. Weberg turned
his horses out In the pasture. They felt
good and began to play and run around.
One of them jumped into Snowdrift
near an old straw pile and he sank down
through the soft snow into cavity, when
10, and behold up jumped the long lost
pig, with squeal and an ugh! ~ If to say
"Don't bother mer' and walked off In a
dignified manner. He was ~ fat and
healthy us he was the day before the storm,
but little stiff in one hind leg where the
horse had stepped on him. Thursday was
the 18th, making sixteen days imprisor
ment without food. air or water This
may be u valuable discovery. The hog
may live through the winter like the bear.
in comatose state, subsisting ON nutri-
ment derived from his paw, IL buried suf-
ficiently to be protected from the air and
light. Dakota Globe
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02

In sober truth the horrors Of houseclean
ing are, on the part OF the man, largely
mythical, II not wholly imaginary. Some
little disturbance OF his habitual Incidence
there Is, but this Is good medicine for him.
After be passes the middle mile post on his
journey, man falls into the habit Of sitting
IN the same chair and in the same place in
the same room when he is at home. Take
him into another room in bis own house,
and he does not seem at home there. Con-
sequently a very small molehill Of disturb
ance is 10 him n mountain crowned with
heaven reaching peaks OF insurmountable
difficulties and uncomfortable troubles.
Moreover, it is his hereditary right to
growl at housecleaning: he has It from
his father who had 1t from his father,
whose father left It to him as a sacred
trust When he was younger he used to
dance around the Maypole with Jocund
Youth. But now j.. Youth, who never
grows day older herself, dances with
other beardless cheeks and silken mus
taches and he, good man, has touch Of
rheumatism Ia the knees; unwieldy In his
habit, should he essay to dance. Jocund
Youth would die OF laughter, and the
kangaroo would come from afar to learn
his step. Therefore he stays In his lair
and growls between his clinched gums
Truth to tell, he scarcely knows that
housekeeping has been going on until IT
is all over and even then he has to be told.
He knows netting abort 1t saye when the
tide reaches dis own room. For the rest
of the house lie does not know what trans.
formation has been going on. He learns
that the carpets have been treated like an
unlucky candidate; they have been up
beaten, and put down again. He does not
know, until he has been told, that every
speck of paint in the house has been cleaned
He learns that the bureau in his room has
been moved into new corner, just after
he had learned to find it In the old one ir
the dark. Nobody tells him this; he il
smart enough to find it out all by his lone
unassisted self. And when. after many
contusions be will learn the new route a
accurately as he knew the old one, 10
smiling May will come once more and 4
will be moved back again. This also i
vanity.-Robert j. Burdette In Ladies
Home Journal.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02
Digging Greens.

II Is time to pick greens, or, rather,
dig greens. Travelling the rural roads
in Connecticut just now, especially in
the neigborhood Of cities, one sees chill
dren and women ON the green lots by
the roadside digging in the ground just
as fast as they can. Each one carries a
willow arm basket or tin pail, and a
short bladed case knife. The little
squads chatter and laugh and talk
gossip, and now and then one trills the
refrain Of popular song. They are
not skylarking or merrymaking; they
are digging greens-Ted and yellow
dock, dandelions, burdock and plantain
for home consumption.
Everybody wants greens now, and
trade in them is very lively. In a few
weeks the garden greens-cultivated
dandelions or spinach-will be ready to
market, and then the popular demand
for wild greens will cease. Most of the
will greens gathered by Connecticut
women and children are dandelions and
dock, but some of the bolder ones, nim-
BILE footed maidens, put on rubber boots
and slouch hats, penetrate into the tan
gled swamps, leaping from one quaking
tussock to another, and harvest q bushel
of wet and shining cowslips day.
About decayed old stumps in forest
d2les skoke thrives, and thoy pluck it in
handfuls.
At the beginning of the season dan
delion greens are worth forty or fifty
cents peck in the market, and the re-
tail dealers sell them for fifty or sixty
cents; later the price runs down to
twenty-five cents a peck.-Cor. New
York Sun.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02

Cara Galan, governor of the state of
Coahuila and one OF the most prominent
men of northern Mexico, has returned to
his home from an extended hunting trip in
the mountains fifty miles east Of here. He
is suffering from a severe wound in the
side, received in thrilling adventure with
bear, which came near costing the lives
of himself and party. They had wounded
bear of unusual size, and it took refuge
in cave in the face of precipice.
The governor, to ascertain whether the
bear was really in the cave or not, started
in, carbinein hand. A considerable growl-
ing from the inside caused him, somewhat
hastily, to back out. He was followed by
the bear, which had already got its head
and shoulders outside, when the governor,
knowing that if the bear once got clear out
the whole party would go down the preci-
pice, whacked the aaaimal With his carbine
and then shot him.
The bear fell back into the cave, his
caring proving that he was by no means
dead. The party then proceeded to smoke
him out, and on his making second at
tempt at an exit the governor shot him
! again, disabling him. The animal then
made rush at Mr.. Galan and struck him
| blow in the side, his claws cutting deeply
into the flesh. The dogs then attacked
the bear, and they all went down the cliff
together.
| The governor barely saved himself from
being taken down the precipice with them.
This is the second hunting adventure Gov
ernor Galan has had within the past few
months. Mexico Cor. San Francisco Ex-
| aminpr
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02
Statue of Columbus for santo Domingo

statue OF columbus Tor SantO Domingo.
The Ames Manufacturing company
has received the contract for a large
bronze statue of Christopher Columbus
to be erected at ancient Isabella, on the
island of Santo Domingo, where Colum-
bus made his first settlement. The idea
was conceived by Thomas H. Cummins,
of Boston, and has been carried through
Catholic newspaper in that city. The
statue was made from designs of R.
Andrew of the State Normal Art school,
and the model was prepared by Alois
Buyens, of Client. The statue repre-
sents Columbus standing with the left
hand extended upward in thanksgiving
while the right points to the first settle
ment in the New World on a sphere
below.
The figure is 8 feet and Q inches high
and will be mounted on pyramid OF
coral and limestone 10 feet high, which
will be crowned with a capstone OF
dressed granite. The people in charge
of tho monument have been given the
land necessary for the foundation of the
monument, and the republic of Santo Do
mingo has agreed TO allow the importa-
tion of the statue and the foundation
free Of duty and to care for the memorial
as public property.-Cor. Springfield
Rnnuhlican
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02

The tests that have been made by a
street car company of Paris Of new
form of nailless horseshoes have been so
successful that the company has decided
to employ this shoe exclusively in the
future. The new shoe is made of Bes-
semer steel, and in appearance is similar
to the ordinary iron shoe, except that it
has q bent lever that attaches itself half
way up the rear of the hoof without in
any way oompressing it.
A clamp incloses the hoof, parting the
two heels of the shoe, and Is supported
on the top of the lever, which wholly
sustains it, and thereby prevents COM
preston of any part Of the hoof. The
shoe is also fitted with three small in.
terror clamps, which penetrate the horn
of the hoof and prevent displacement of
the shoe without the preliminary raising
of the clamp. A number of private
firms in Paris have also tested the shoe
with success. It is considered by many
that this form Of shoe will sooner OF
later revolutionize the farrier's industry.
--Philadelnhia Record.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02
Why He Didn't Sit Down.

A police court, even in Paris, is prosaic
place SO far as scenery is concerned; but
great deal of color was observable the
other day in the witness box, rs it may be
called, OF the tribunal of correctional
police. There stood, with his vizor up, a
tall parsonage in the full panoply Of
knight errant of the Middle Ages.
He was resplendent in a coat Of mail, his
hands were incased in iron gauntlets, and
he looked In fact as If he had just stepped
out of the pages of "Ivanhoe."
His appearance of course created what
may be called without the least touch Of
exaggeration "a sensation" The grim
clerk OF the court looked surprised, the
young barristers and solicitors smiled and
the expression on the face of the presiding
magistrate can only be imagined At last
the clerk summoned up courage, after
much whispering had taken place between
him and the magistrate, to demand of the
medieval effigy an account of himself.
Then it transpired that the man Of the
mail was Jacques Pierre Grosclaude, that
he was engaged in distributing handbills
for the proprietor of the brasserie Of "Tha
Beautiful Fredegonda," and that he had
been subpphsad in the case Of Blancard
versus Denizet
But how comes it," asked the irate pre-
siding magistrate, that you have the au.
dacity to present yourself in dress like
thatp
The reply was delivered in faltering
tone. Yielding to necessity, the knight err
rant had pawned his prosaic attire and
was obliged to appear in the professional
,kc f,,x xryhfnl, ha foty h,xkn
bills on the boulevards setting forth the
comforts and luxuries Of the brasserie oi
''The Beautiful Fredegonda." The an
swer having satisfied the magistrate the
witness was told to sit down, but he caused
further explosions Of laughter when he said
naively:
Il can't sit down, your worship, with all
my ironmongery on. Paris Letter.
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02
Beds of Fish Bones in Colorado.

Vast fish beds, covering hundreds of
square miles in northwestern Colorado,
have been recently brought to light and
cannot fail to awaken great interest in
scientific circles. The beds extend dis.
tance of 150 miles in the region of the
Green river country and were traced to
points more than 100 miles toward the in
terror of the state. Scientists have known
of the existence of primeval deposits of
fish in Wyoming, but for the first time
discovery of similar character is reported
in this state. The beds are $50 to 200 feet
thick. To the ordinary observer their ori
gin would remain forever a mystery.
How untold millions of fish could be
piled in distinct layers over large area If
country which is now 5000 to 10000 feet
above sea level is problem which might
stagger the most profound geologist. After
careful investigation, w. c. Hart, of the
Worlds fair mineral department, has ar
rived at q theory which at least appears
plausible. According to his theory, there
was time when the region of the fish de-
posits formed the shore of salt water
ocean. AS the tides swept the waCers
against the rocky shores marshes were
formed on the opposite side of the rocky
barrier. The tides surged against the bar
rier with such force as to throw the fish
into the shallow waters. Owing to the
heated temperature of the air the water in
the marshes evaporated before the tide
again returned, leaving the fish to expire
in the mud.
The next flow brought new supply OF
fish, and after many centuries the beds OF
today were formed. The deposit of each re-
turn of the tide is distinctly marked in the
cliffs and on the sides of the canyons of the
mountain streams. The deposit was raised
to it's present elevation by the same hidder
forces which formed the Mountains
Rocky Mountain News
Democratic Northwest. [volume] (Napoleon, Ohio) 1869-1894, 1892-06-02

The herring fishing season on the Sus-
quehanna river is finished, and the catch
has been unprecedented. The pack will
amount to over 60,O00 barrels of salted
fish. The season open April 8 and closed
May 10. One fisherman caught 100 bar
rels Of the fish with a dipnet in the out
let lock of the canal. It has been no un-
common thing this season to take 2O0,-
600 herring at q haul Of one of the large
seines, which, when paid out, encirclea
three-quarters Of mile or more Of
water area ca. Philadelphia Record.