The true northerner. [volume] (Paw Paw, Mich.) 1855-1920, 1892-11-30
A Sprinkle of Spice.


publican.
POSITIVE, good; comparative, bet
ter: superlative, better not.-Phlla-
| delphia Ledger.
BALLPLAYING is a sort OF grab
game so far as the catcher Is con-
cerned. -Picayune.
] IT Is strange paradox that fast
cOlors are cOlOrs that Will not rum
Boston Transcript.
The liquor question staggers the
Incorporate man more than any one
else. -Lowe,l Courier.
In his moments Of abstraction even
the pckpockct thinks time is money.
Philadelphia Times.
The book agent is another thing
that never goes without saying
Binghamton Republican.
A DRINKING-sONG to be popular
should be written with a rest at the
ar-Chicago Inter Ocean.
You cannot expect a man to keep
an unmOved face when he let's his
! sountcnancc fall. -Siftings.
WE can't blame actors for being
superstitious when we contemplate
The supers. Elmira Gazette.
II the keeper Of the jail is a jailer
why isn't the keeper Of the prison u
prisoner? Sheffield Telegraph.
NOT one man in dozen will tell
the truth If you ask him why he
wears plug hat.-Ram's Horn.
FLYTIME may be over, but ia the
clearinghouse fruit-cake the fly is
still currant. Gazette.
A NEW novel is called There Il
No Death" 1t is the story of the
ballet girl. Philadelphia Record.
TRUE enough. rightly looked into,
clothes don't make a man, but how
about habits?-Philadclphia Times.
"THE man who just passed is an
educated Indian. Then l suppose
he lives on a mental reservation. -
Puck.
COLD contracts. That's why your
coaled up for the winter.-Dansville
Breeze.
IL oil can still the fury of the
waves, why does not every ship take
plenty OF it in her cruise?-Texas
Siftings.
AN Irish friend insists that the
chief pleasure in kissing pretty girl
is when she won't let you. Boston
Transcript.
PERDIDA-How do you know thathe
| Is gentleman? PenelOpe-Why,
any girl could tell that 10y the crease
in his trousers. Truth.
THERE'S this to be said of fall fash :
ions, that q man never goes down
with the same grace that woman
does. -Philadelphia Times.
BoNDs-Are you quick at footing
figures, Coupons? Coupons-Yes, IL
they're dudes figures. l have an only
daughter.-New York Herald.
PARhER-I know a girl who mar
ried Chinaman. Mrs. Parker
Mercy. How could she? Parker
She was Chinese herself Puck.
A CONNECTICUT man swallowed his
false teeth while asleep. He should
not be surprised if he feels as if some
thing were gnawing at his vitals.-
Picayune.
This is an Ideal hand" remarked
the gambler under his breath; as no
dealt himself four aces and the other
fellow quartet of monarchs. Phil
adelphia Record. -
Il AM getting tired OF this inius.
ticc, said the trigger to the barrel.
"You are the one who gets loaded,
and then l get pulled on account of
it. indianapolis Journal.
ado YOU ever suffer from stage
fright?" asked Adlet OF the famous
tragedian. "Oh, yes" he replied.
| "One of the ugliest girls in the ballet
is in love with me. Judge.
WAITER-Er-it's customary here
for the guests TO remember the wait
er, sir. Irate patron (whO has been
poorly served)-Well, / should think
1t would be.-Chicago News.
THE fact that a public official is
the servant of the people does not
seem to excite any wild desire to re-
main one Of "the people, and be
waited Washington Star.
Il HAVE sucn an lndulgcnt nus
band" said little Mrs. Doll. ayes,
so George says" responded Mr.. Spite
full. sometimes INDUCES little too
much, doesn't he?"-Tid-Bts
IT Is rather hard on the men, but
no unmarried woman ever gets up in
prayer-meeting and talks about her
trials and burdens being harder than
she can bear. -Atchison Globe.
IL TELL YOU" exclaimed Mr.. Bios
som. Of st. Louis, debating with a
Chicago man, 81 tell you that St.
Louis Is the banner town" EYES," ad-
mitted Mr. Livewayte, OF Chicago,
Il understand it Is a flag station."--
Puck.
GENTLEMAN-Good evening, my
little dear. Is your papa at home?
Little Dcar-I don't know; I'll see.
Mamma is at home, and when she's
md II 4 n