Los Angeles herald., 1892-03-09
A STUDY OF EARS.
TIE HUMAN EAR AND THE TALE
1T TELLS TO THE OBSERVER.

Did any one ever go TO any or the thea
ters when the house was crowded and
amuse himself or herself studying the
ears of the audience? 1t will pay the
observing man to do so. He will realize
then that there are ears and ears; those
which indicate character in its several
degrees, individuality, tirmness, resolu-
ton, kindness and it's antithesis, and the
various other attributes which go to
make up the widely varying specimens
of humanity
A study of ears may not be entirely
satisfactory. One is apt to find upon
somebody else with whom he is not des-
perately in love pair of auricular ap-
pendages which remind him forcibly of
those he sees when facing his mirror. 1t
is rather an odd thing that the majority
of men and women, however, seldom
see their own ears. They can do SO
readily with the aid of quick silvered
glass. but the vanity of human nature
seems to stop at the features of the face.
A woman will spend half an hour ad-
miring her own pretty red lips and keep
the young man with theater tickets in
his pocket waiting an hour while she
adjusts her eyebrows and gets just the
right complexion on her cheeks, but the
ears are left to take care of themselves.
A wet rag is pushed hastily through
their intricacies and they have had their
share of attention. There are excep-
tions, of course. The woman who knows
that her ears are lovely and bound to at
tract admiration will play with them
affectionately and take care that her
hair is arranged so that no fraction of
them is hidden from view Then there
are people whose ears stick out like the
head flaps of jackass-an elongated
malformation. They can't help seeing
their ears-neither can any one else
REMARKABLE PAIR OF EARS.
1t was at Hooley's the other night that
study was made of the eccentricity of
the ear. The auditorium was crowded
and the jokes of the comedian emptied
into a thousand tympanic cavities What
cavities some of them were too! There
was man with hole in his ear which
looked as though it might have been one
of the nine mouths of the Mississippi
One would have thought a steamer could
pass through it without sticking, and as
for the flies and earwigs, large colony
OF them could have habitated there all
winter and hardly have been felt. Be-
cause the cavity was large it must not
be supposed that the owner of the ear
was proportionately SO; to the contrary,
this cavity was the biggest part of him.
He was little fellow; the ideal of a
henpecked husband. The loudly de-
veloped channel of sound suggested the
probability of his being accustomed to
hear frequent commands to 'sgo and
light the fire." or "get up and give the
baby paregoric." He seemed to be happy
this time, for he was alone, and there
were no such discordant sounds to offend
his hearing.
Near him was man who had a de-
cided inclination to obesity. He was
tall too, and could have easily tipped
the beam at 200 pounds. Now, one
would have supposed that his auricular
members would have been developed
equally with the rest of his anatomy.
One would have been disappointed, how
ever. They were almost midgets along
side of those belonging to the little man,
and looked as though they might have
received shock in childhood from which
they had never recovered. But in s-ite
of their diminutiveness there was great
deal of ont-careness about theln-an
independence as to what they heard and
what they didn't hear. A wife might
have yelled fire and baby and paregoric
at these ears all night and they would
never have heard it.: they were not con-
structed after that fashion.
A BEAUTIFUL PAIR OF EARS.
Alongside of him sat woman who
was evidently the wife. Her ears were
long, irregular and stood out from the
side of her head like the dust guards in
sleeping car. They were ears which,
it could be plainly seen, were accustomed
to being on the alert for some familiar
voice. There was startled appearance
about them which indicated that this
voice was i'll the habit of greeting them
with command or a reprimand more
than anything else. Evidently but few
words of affection OF endearment had
passed through them.
In the row of seats just behind this
queenly. interesting trio was a perfect
symphony of ears. They were not the
ears of men. but of women-pretty
young women, with elaborately rich
dresses and aristocratic faces. Indeed,
these were patrician ears, and the blue
blood could almost be seen coursing
through them.
The girl who sat next to the end had
the prettiest ears of all. They were
beauties. Moderately small, regularly
formed, sloping off into an oval at the
lobe, and thin almost to transparency.
There was a pinky tinge about them
which was ample apology for the poets
who sing about coral ears. They stood
out from the head at almost an exact
angle They were perfect in every par
ticular, but they were not responsive
ears. They were accustomed to hear
ing sweet nothings said, and simply
listening for more. They said plainly
that their owner was one wrapped up in
the contemplation of her own charms,
and expected all others to be equally so
and to make it known in words. Look
ing at those ears one would have de-
scribed her as follows: Deep blue eyes,
nose inclined to Roman, red lips, white
teeth, clear complexion, little animation