Idaho semi-weekly world. [volume] (Idaho City, Idaho Territory) 1875-1908, 1892-04-22
1HclE PoDoeR HANGS 4 pIcTuar


''"s~S - FiCTURE.
'"vss conciusIveiy That IL va. r..
~ necessary to Cali In a Mar.
lou never saw such a cornmot;on
I Iyn,,a mouse In all your life as when INV
49, roaser undertook to do a lob. 4
picture would have come home from ~
.'a'ee'naker's and be standing il the An.
as room waiting to be put IN. and Am,
vaRer would ask what was 10 \. 49,
". ..n. ~ and Uncle Podger would sav.
on, you leave that to me. Don't vo,
q ~, o' you, worry yourselves about thar
III do all that, u' shac'
ana then he would take of his coat ana
Degin. He would send the pirl ort 90 -
sNpenorth Of nails, and then ore ~ -.
boys AFTER ner to tell her what siza 3, 80.
ana from that he would RradualIv worS
oown, and start the whole housa
Mow You go and get me nv bamme-
WILL he would shout; 'sand Won hr;re, ~
.ne rule, Tom; and shall want tha star,
ladder, and had better have 4 k;tchapp
cnair, too; and Jim you run ronnd r.. NJ.
Goggles, and tell him, PAS kind raUards
ana hopes his legs better, and will he land
MN his spirit leyelY And don,t Won %
Maria, because ! shall want somehodv ~
mold me the light; and when the girl coynss
BACK sne must go out again for hit ~
picture cord and Tom--where's Tom,"
Tom, you come here; shall want von q
hand me up the picture.n
Ana then he would lift up the nictpra
ana drop it, and it would come ont ~ the
frame, and he would try to save the place
and cut himself; and then he would snr;n0
round the room looking for his handker.
chief. He could not find his handkerchief
because 1t was in the pocket Of the coat. he
mad taken off, and he did not know wbere
ne had put the coat, and all the house had
20 leave off looking for his tools and start
looking for his coat, while he would danca
around and hinder them. ~
Doesn't anybody in the whole bonse
know where my coat is? never came
across such set in all my life-upon INV
word didn't. Six of you-and YOU cant
md coat that put down not five min
utes agol Well, of all the"-
Then he'd get up, and find that he had
been sitting on it, and would call out:
oh, you can give it upi I've found it
myself now. Might just as we'll ask the
cat to find anything as expect you people
to find it,"
And when half an hour had been spent
in tying up his finger, and new glass had
been got, and the tools, and the ladder.
and the chair, and the candle had been
brought, he would have another 20. the
whole family, including the girl and the
charwoman, standing round in a semi-cir.
Gle, ready to help. Two people would have
to hold the chair, and third would help
him up on it, and hold him there, and a
fourth would hand him a nail, and a fifth
would pass him up the hammer, and he
would take hold of the nail and drop it,
"Therer he would say in an injured
tone; "now the nails gone"
And we would all have to go down on
our knees and grovel for it, while he would
stand on the chair and grunt, and want to
know if he was to be kept there all the
evening
The nail would be found at last. and by
thu t time he would have lost the hammer.
where's the hammer? What did do
with the hammer Great heavens! Seven
of you gaping round there, and you don't
know what did with the hammer!''
We would find the hammer for him, and
then he would have lost sight of the mark
he had made on the wall where the nail
was to go in, and each of us had to get up
on a chair beside him, and see if we could
find it; and we would each discover it in a
different place, and he would call us all
fools, one after another, and tell us to get
down. And he would take the rule and
remeasure, and find that he wanted half
of 3l$s inches from the corner, and would
try to do it in his head and go mad.
And we would all try to do it in our
heads, and all arrive at different results,
and sneer at one another. And in the gen
eral row the original number would be
forgotten, and Uncle Podger would have
to measure it again.
He would use bit of string this time,
and at the critical moment, when the old
fool was leaning over the chair at an angle
of As degs., and trying to reach point
three inches beyond what was pos
sibe for him to reach, the string would
slip, and down he would slide onto the
piano, a really fine musical effect being
produced by the suddenness with which
his head and body struck all the notes at
the same time.
And Aunt Maria would say that she
would not allow the children to stand
around and hear such language.
At last Uncle Podger would get the spot
fixed again, and put the point of the nail
on it with his left hand and take the ham
mer in his right hand. And with the first
blow he would smash his thumb and drop
the hammer with a yell on somebody s
toes.
Aunt Maria would mildly observe that
next time Uncle Podger was going to ham
mer nail in the wall she hoped he'd let
her know in time, so that she could make
arrangements to go and spend aweek with
her mother while it was being done.
"Oh, you women; you make such fuss
over everything" Uncle Podger would re
DIV, picking himself up. why, like do
| ing a little job of this sort"
| And then he would have another try
and at the second blow the nail would &c
clean through the plaster, and half the
hammer after it, and Uncle Podger be pre-
cipitated against the wall with force nearly
sufficient to f1atten his nose.
Then we had to find the rule and the
string again, and new hole was made
and about midnight the picture would bt
up-very crooked and insecure. the wal
! for wards round looking as if it had beer
smoothed down with rake, and every
body dead beat and wretched - except
Uncle Podger.
There you are" he would say, stepping
heavily off the chair onto the char wo
mans corns, and surveying the mess hi
had made with evident pride. why
some people would have had man to d.
a little thing like thatr-Jerome K. Jer
ONES Three Men in Boat.
| Plenty In Sight