Morning journal and courier., 1892-07-20
WARM.

Speaking of a small piece of ice. it's
generally a warm day when it's left.-Phil-
adelphia Times.
At st. Anne's Sunday school in Lowell
in answer to the question, ''What is the
greatest church festival" an orphan of six
years promptly responded, "The straw
berry festival. boston Traveller.
Old gentleman--Don't you think it is
cruel to shut up bird IN little cage like
thata
Little girl-Oh, don't know. have a
pretty good time, and live in flat
New York Weekly.
"Did you go to the racesi"
"Ya-a-s. It's gwsat fun to see the
cwowd and watch the horses wun."
"Did You lose anythingp
''Ya-a-s. / wan aftah the twain and
lost my bweatb, don't you know."-Wash-
ington Star.
Codling-Why, chappie, you look
am quite tired, Cholly. I got up this
mawning ten minutes earlier than usual,
instead of remaining in bed ten minutes
later than usual, as I generally do
Harper's Bszar.
A young hack writer was employed to
write up prospectus for circus. "Say,"
he said, turning to the manager, 'Tve
about exhausted my vocabulary on this
| thing. Have you q thesaurusi" "No,"
said the manager, "we've only got hip
popotsmus. Monthly.
Mrs. Flors-But, husband, won't the
| people who buy seeds of you be disap-
pointed when the seeds they have planted
come up and look 30 different from these
| gorgeous pictures in your cstsloguei Mr..
+. (seedman)-Oh, there's no trouble about
| &1at I'll -Ppa-
ton Transcript
This is an age where wise men are
scarce. A gentleman who was recently
arrested and fined So for riding bicycle
on the sidewalk now claims he has desire
to spend $50, 900 to deprive the officer who
arrested him of his position. The officer
would be glad to quit for half that amount
Minneapolis Tribune.
The story Is told of On eminent divine
and his bright boy that is not devoid Of
instructivsness. The father had q way OF
saying to his son when leaving home, RE
member whose boy you are" The lad on,
day turned the tables by calling out to hi
father, Good bye, papa, remember who's
father you are. New York Examiner.
Mr.. Hoste Gn terrified whisper)-
Marie. there isn't half enough luncheon
for all these people. What on earth am
| 10 QOs hfb- I1Oopc-l IL Sct oI boulc U
them, dear. Mr. Hoste (ten minutes later
You're a trump, Marie! But how die
you manage to get so many to got Mrs
Hostel just whispered to them that yoI
had consented to sing "Rocked in tn
Cradle of the Deep."-Boston News.
First Floor Walker-Talk of meanness
That woman is q reg'lar old miser, II
bet. Second Floor Walker-Did she hag
gle over pricesi ono; she selected he
things and paid for 'em fast enough, bu
; during the whole seventeen minutes W
kept her waiting for her change sh
!, hasn't moved around once to look at tn
other sorts of goods we got on sale. 'Frai,
she'll see something abe wants, 'spose.-
Puck.
"What's the matter with 'Sspsy' therei
asked one newsboy of another. "Sapsy
!. was bemoaning in heartrending manner i
the gutter with some muddy psders unde
his arm. "Ugh," responded the boy I'D
/ dressed, a sturdy little chap with frani
dirty face, che fell down one day un' hurt
ed him, 90 q Teller give him q quarter, an
he has been . tumblin' un' ballin' eve
: sens. That's the simperthy act."-Bosto
, journal