Morris tribune. [volume] (Morris, Minn.) 1880-2000, 1892-05-11
TAXING bachelors.

There has recently been some talk about
taxing bachelors in New York state, but
find on looking over some old files Of New
York papers OF the date of 1926 that a. hin
was actually introduced at Albany In that
year to tax all unmarried men OF the age
Of twenty-eight and over.
This bill evidently created a great deal
OF alarm, for meeting WAS called at the
old Essex market house at which 400
bachelors more or less old attended. A
great many speeches, some serious and not
few witty, were made, and the following
curious preamble and resolutions were
unanimously adopted:
Whereas, It appears by the public papers
that bill has been introduced into the
legislature Of this state to lay tax upon
bachelors. In what manner the funds are
to be applied, whether for the endowment
of seminary, in which old maids are to be
employed as instructors, or whether to ed
ucate old maids in some of the useful and
polite branches OF literature, that they
may be enabled to get a living without o
helpmate, is unknown to us, not having
seen said bill or its provisions. But what
ever may be the provisions Of said bill, we
conceive it unconstitutional to lay q
specific tax upon old bachelors, md calcu-
lated to cause much mischief in the COM
munity, because it will drive from the
state many good citizens who prefer life
of celibacy.
Further, It will tend to increase bache-
lors, inasmuch as when women find they
can be maintained in a single state many
will prefer that mode of life and refuse all
offers Of matrimony. It will cause many
bachelors to conceal their ages, as women
do now, and thereby lead them to tell un-
truths, which otherwise they never would
have thought of. It will cause old maids
to be ten times more intolerable than they
usually are, by making them independent
of men for livelihood. It will tend to
destroy that exquisite sensibility in men,
who, having lost their sweethearts, have
made pledge to do penance all their lives
by living in a single state. 1t will lead
many men to enter into the holy bonds Of
wedlock without being guided by that be-
witching and delectable passion, love,
and hurry them to marry merely to save
the tax, and so it will produce unhappy
matches, for marriage cannot be happy
without love
Love is q curious thing, you know
It makes one feel all over so.
It will excite to retaliation on the part
of bachelors, and cause them to use their
influence to get tax on old maids, thereby
bringing on civil war between old maids
and bachelors, to the entire destruction of
the peace of society:
Therefore, be it resolved, That we will
use our most earnest exertions to prevent
the passage of the before named bill, which
we consider unconstitutional and fraught
with the most alarming consequences to
the peace and happiness of society.
Resolved, That committee be appointed
to draft memorial to the legislature, pray
ing that the bill may be defeated.
Resolved, That if said bill is laid upon
the table and never taken therefrom, that
we pledge ourselves to marry as soon as
we safely and consistently can.
Resolved, That We tender our heartfelt
sympathies to the old maids, who like
Jeremiah's fgs-the good are very good,
The bad too sour to give the pigs.
Resolved, That it be recommended to
establish house of industry for old
maids, and that old bachelors contribute to
it's support by sending to it their linen to
make up and their stockings to darn.
Resolved, That the thanks of this meet
ing be rendered the market authorities for
the use of this building.
It was moved and carried that a com
mittee of five gentlemen be appointed to
draft memorial to the legislature.
It was also moved and carried that the
proceedings Of the meeting be published in
all the papers that will consent to do it
without charge.
Y -
The bill was withdrawn, for the bachelors
had behind them the power of the ballot,
which the maids had not