The Ohio Democrat. (Logan, O. [Ohio]) 1886-1906, 1892-12-03
A GRAY PARROT.
Folly Airs lila Accomplishments at Un-
timely Moments.

tnhAy tAhh AhAA NJ On-
timely Moments.
Some years ago, when stationed on
the coast of West Africa, bought a
gray parrot which in appearance great
" surpassed the general run of these
birds both in size and beauty Of plum
age, and which, though paid little or
40 attention TO his education, turned
out to be remarkably apt scholar.
The frat indication of his powers was n
| perfectly successful attempt to whistle
the reveille, which, of course, he had
heard on the bugles every morning since
mis- introduction to barracks, and before
long he had mastered pretty nearly
every bu gle call known in the British
army. One morning / was awakened
by his calling in loud tole and in an
sxact imitation of my own voice: "Cof-
fee, Coffee! you imp of darkness, where
are you? Hurry up and bring my cocoa"
Coffee being a little native, as black as
your boot, whom | employed To work
for me. The incident naturally tickled
my risibilities, and ] laughed immod-
erately, the bird joining in the cac-
chinution and again initiating my
tones exactly, From that time on he
was liable to pick up anything heard
and repeat it at inopportune moments,
which was all very well in its way, but
which was apt to grow monotonous.
Regularly at 5 a. m. he would start a
monologue, interspersed with bugle
calls and diabolical peals of laughter,
which awolSe me. never am very
amiable under circumstances of that
kind, and would heave my shoes or the
first missile that came handy at him.
If 1 happened to go anywhere near the
mark he would calculate, "Poor Polly
poor, poor Polly" in such doleful ac-
cents that my wrath was invariably
converted into laughter in which the
bird Joined with great gusto Some
times | would yell to the boy and say
Coffee, take this Internal bird away"
and all down the corridor like the very
echo of my voice, would come, "Take
this internal bird away, bird away"
''Polly" after awhile became quite a
character, and was offered consider
able sums for him, but decided to take
him home and make him present to
the governor" Of course on ship
board he was among the sailors, and
equally, of course, he learned quite a
number of commands inciden tai to their
calling, together with a less desirable
accompaniment of bad language When
l got him home the way he would
yell to an imaginary crew to square
away the main BRACE" and perform
various other nautical feats, was a
caution to snakes, accompanying his
commands with string of profanity
that would have made the toughest old
salt hide his head with shame or envy,
and invariably indulging in these tricks
when we had lady callers. The old
man wanted to get rid of him, but
suggested that after awhile, as long as
he heard none, he would discontinue
his bad language, and so it proved. One
Christmas day we were giving chill
dren's party, and amongst the other
things provided for their amusement
was an exhibition of conjuring by one
of London's experts In order to view
it, we were all seated at one end of the
drawing-room, whilst the knight of
magic performed at the other. Immedi-
ately behind the audience was con-
servatory connected with the room by
large glass sliding doors, and in this
conservatory Polly's cage was hung.
The prestidigitateur, as is usual with
this fraternity, before performing one
of his tricks, was giving us a long rig
marole of what he was going to do,
when shrill voice proceeding from the
above conservatory, broke
in upon him with:
Its all lies, ladies and gentlemen;
it's all lies" followed by fiendish yell
of laughter.
The conjuror was for moment nom
plused but noticing whence the inter-
ruption proceeded, appreciated the
joke, Joined in the general merriment
which the incident had excited, and ad-
mitted with good grace that 'it was
all lies" On another occasion an aunt
of mine was paying us visit and
noticing that Polly had splashed his
bath water over a window near which
he happened to be, said in severe tone:
"Look what mess you've made, you
dirty bird. I've good mind to throw
you out of the window" to which the
culprit replied in the most contrite
tone: Poor Polly, scratch Polly" But
a moment afterwards, as the lady and
left the room together, he Missed out
in the most vindictive tones Imaginable:
"You wretch" My aunt returned and
asked him: whats that you said?"
Poor Polly, poor Polly" came the
reply humbly and beseechingly from
this mendacious bird,
When our home was broken up at the
death of my father had to part with
the parrot, but no doubthe is yet alive,
and if he still continues to acquire
knowledge at the old rate, must be a
veritab mine of amusement Louis